Watershed Heights

Monday, May 16, 2011

The last time I got off work early, Ruth had a miscarriage. I remember that day. It was a day very similar to this. I had awaken to the sun pounding on my eyelids. I can still smell the bacon Ruth was cooking in the kitchen. It was the last breakfast she ever made me. I took a hot shower. I dressed in my first handmade suit that is still hanging in my closet. I went out to the kitchen. "Good morning my love," she said as she put my food on the table. We kissed. After I ate, I went into the bedroom to grab my briefcase. "I'll be working late tonight babe," I called. "Again, Jacques? I want you home with me, I'm cooking your favorite," she pleaded. "You know I have to work hard, it's not just the two of us anymore," I say as I knelt down to her stomach, "we have a strong boy we must rise. He deserves the world." I kissed her stomach and headed out to leave.

"I love you." she called.

"I love you too."

I was at work until 5:30 when the phone rang.

"Jacques, please come home. Come home now. Something is wrong."

I hung up and ran to my car. I can still feel the afternoon sun. It felt like a million heat hands were pressed down all over my body. The sweat clinged to my new designer shirt, ruining any image I possibly had before. But that didn't register at this time. I got into the car and pressed down on the gas. To this day, I have never arrived home so quickly. I ran into the elevator to go our pre-penthouse apartment. When I arrived at the apartment, I did nothing but burst through the doors. I remember the panic I felt as I looked around to see where she may be.

"Ruth! Ruth!" I looked around the kitchen, the living room. "Ru-" I looked down.

All I remember was the blood. Little spots of blood trailing into the bathroom. I followed.

And then I saw her.

Crying, in a puddle of blood on floor with a look I have never seen upon her face.

Hopelessness.

"I don't know what happened, Jacques. I don't- I don't..."

In my head I knew I should have knelt down, taken her in my arms and comfort her. I knew I should have tried to take her to the hospital or re-assure her that everything would be OK. There were a million things that I knew I should have done. But the moment I saw Ruth in the puddle of my dead son, my heart closed. For the first time, I had no control over my body or my mind. And I hated it. She made me lose control. She killed my son. She was the reason for the worst moments of my life. And I would never forgive her.

I walked out of the bathroom and sat on the bed. We stayed that way for the rest of the night.

The next morning, I awoke. I took a cold shower. I dressed and left. That was the beginning of the nights spent late in the office. We no longer slept in the same bed. Our home was filled with silence. Soon I got involved with Dirty Harry and his boys. And then I was in too deep. It didn't matter at that point what Ruth tried to do to pull me back to us... I was gone for good. It wasn't until the building collapsing that Ruth finally pushed away. I was no longer the man she married and she realized that day that I never would be. But where she fell in weakness, I gained in strength.

And after years of resentment and aggression, today would be the last showdown.

Friday, May 13, 2011

"Hello.""So how would you want to get those papers?""What are you talking about?," I say half-listening, half-reading the proposal on my desk."I got the papers."I stop. "You what?""I got the papers Jacques. Don't ask how, just know I have them. Every single one.""Are you sure?""Yes! Pick me up after you get off work.""Yeah, yeah of course."We hang up.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

I finally reach the office. When I get out, I can no longer smell the pie and I no longer think of that bitch. I'm here to make my money and go home to figure out how to get those papers. I dial John, he'll do anything for a quick thousand."John. I got a job for you.""Whaddya need Bossman?" he says eagerly."I need you to follow D.J. around again. I haven't gotten what I need and I have a feeling he's the one who has it.""No problem boss.""Oh and John, do not be found out. No one needs to know anything about this. If I hear one thing from my sources that you have someone following your tail, you get nothing.""I'm on it."

I enter the building and head to the elevators. I press the button that will take me to the 6th floor. The elevator takes me up, I contemplate my next move. I've been saving Mary for when things got desperate and after this afternoon run-in, it is now the right time to strike.

Ding!I exit and head to my office.

"You have a message on line 4, Mr. Cartes.""Thanks, Denise."

The hours go by. I am no longer thinking of the papers, or that bitch or her bitch boy. I am focused; driven by the money that I'm making each hour I spend in this place. No one could ever do this job better than me. Any idiot could build a building, that is simple. But the time it takes to plot... to plan... to construct a work of art, that takes a true genius. The minutes that turn into hours, the hours that fade into days, those days turn into months, the months that turn into years and soon one day you wake up and realize, this job... has become an obsession. When I first started out at Jones&Johns, I just wanted to be successful. What I didn't know was the rush of power that surges through my body every time I saw my structures be brought into the world. They stood firm, tall, strong above the rest; and soon I became one with them. Soon, Jones was asking me to build more and more all around the cities; I was being built up to be greater than I ever was before. But Ruth didn't understand.. no one truly did. "Its just a job, Jacques," she would say, "I do not understand how you have become so obsessed." Then the fights came, only they were different than before because I was now different than before. I had become like a building; tall, powerful, made of cold, hard steel. Sitting at the top alone did nothing but made me more confident in my power, but of course that is when people begin to take your spot. I was no longer weak; as long as I am alive, I will never let anyone take my place. I would do anything in my power to crush them. And that is what I did.

"I'm going on my lunch break Denise," I say to my assistant as I walk out the door. It's 2:30 and I head out to the Diner. As I get into my car, I think about stopping back over to D.J.'s to see if she'll come out. It's afternoon, they can't be too far. I begin to head over to the apartments to go through the same routine I've been going through. I park the car on the side of the building so that none of these dogs damage my car. No one is standing by the entrance and I make the climb to 13B. When I reach the door, I just

Knock,knock.Instead of being greeted by the scared little boy, I see the bountiful brown hair that once laid beside me every night. Then I see her face. Those big brown eyes the had the glimmer of green that could only be seen when a person stares deeply into them under the golden sun; those red lips that become even redder after eating pints of strawberries all day in bed and do nothing but make her brown skin glow even more. But there is something different about her, something feels strange. I put up my defense as I push past her.

"You finally opened the door.""You finally stopped banging."Instantly I know what is different; she has no fear."I figured you would come to your senses soon enough. Where's your boy?""He's out.""Don't get short with-""You asked a question, I answered. Is there anything else you want?"She looks at me square in the eye and I know its time to do business."Where are the papers Ruth?""I don't have them.""Fuck you mean 'you don't have them?' Where the hell are they Ruth?""I don't know. And even if I did, do you really think I'd give them to you?""You know as well as me, if those papers ever get out, you're going down with me.""I know this, Jacques. But I'm telling you, I don't have them.""Well if you don't have them who the fuck does Ruth?," Then I realize, "It's your boy, he has 'em doesn't he. Doesn't he! Where the fuck did he put them Ruth?""D.J. does not have them and neither do I, so if you will excuse me..."She begins to head to the door. I can hear the children outside playing games. The cars whizzing down the busy mid-day streets. Suddenly, the room becomes unbearably hot. I feel the anger rise in me like the temperature outside. I grab her by the wrist."Listen to me-""Let me go!""Listen to me!"She continues to resist, making me hold onto her even tighter."Ruth! Give me the papers, give me the damn papers!""No! Stop! NO-"DARKNESSThe room is completely black with only the sun lighting up the room through the open blinds.But I don't let go. I want her to remain close to me."What the hell happened?""The hell if I know! Now let me go!""Shut up!""Leave me alone!"She breaks lose and runs towards the back.I stand alone, in the darkness. With only the light shining down on me.Then I see her. With only the light shining, I can make out those big brown eyes that have no glimmer of green but instead are darker, almost black. I see those red lips, that once used to tremble in fear but instead serve as a warning to what was coming out of them"Get. Out." The red lips close. They are locked. And the gun she holds in her hand is loaded."This isn't the last you'll see of me." And I walk out the door.Well this was a change of pace. As I walk down the stairs, the smell of apples hit me. Its coming from the diner. Apple pie and that damn diner, that's how it all started. I go back to the day when i first met Ruth. When I first saw those eyes, those lips, that face. I remember wanting her just because every other guy wanted her. That was when I had nothing, when I was nothing. But she was the first person to have faith in me, the first to stand by me as I made my way to the top. I go back to the day when we moved into our first apartment and she baked her apple pie. I remember the birthdays and holidays, and she would always bake that apple pie. "Remember when we first met, Jacques? Remember what you did? Ordering me that yucky apple pie from Deena's. You tried to impress me so much that day, carrying it over to me and everything. Then right before you got to me, it fell right on the floor, you going down with it. Oh it was a sight. And now, we can eat all the apple pies we want, Jacques. And I promise, they will never fall. I will never let them fall." I get into the car and I pass by the diner only to see a line going all around the corner.Policemen are jumping the lines, children are pulling on their mother's dresses impatiently waiting. I look into the window and see a man receive what looks like cookies and a cream pie. I remember the days of standing in the line with Ruth, joking about what kind of pie we would order for that day. I am tempted to go inside and order myself but I look down at the clock to see its nearly 3:25. Shit. I snap back into reality. The diner, the pie, the first time we met, was a lifetime ago. Things are different now. I can't keep going back into the past, not when she is the enemy of my future. She wants to play hard, I'll come back harder. Pulling a gun out on me was a dumbass mistake, that bitch has to know what she just did.. what she just did makes this a war.

I drive back to the office, rolling up my windows so that I can no longer smell the pie scented air.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Fuck. I slid out the bed once I realized how late it was. I needed to get home, now. I stood, stretched out my arms and began to put back on my clothes. I'm looking for my shoe when I hear"Mmm where are you going? It's 3 o'clock.""Home.""Why don't you stay over? Come back to bed," Mary calls."Can't. I have to be at work early,"She yawns, "Ok, then have a good day. Wait, am I going to see you later?""Maybe if I don't stay late in the office," I say getting slightly irritated."Don't do that," she says straightening up,"don't come lay with me at night and not want me in the morning. I'm not doing that Jacques."This is too much talking for 3:00 in the morning. But I know I have to keep her satisfied for as long as I need her to do what I want to be done. "I'm not doing anything. I'll call you when I get off work ok?" I kiss her and hurry out the door before anymore comes out her mouth.It's only a matter of days, then everything will go back to how it should be. I have been tired of playing this charade for months on end just waiting for Ruth to snap. But I knew this would happen once I brought Mary into the equation more complicated but I still got the better deal. Mary knows Ruth better than I do and when the time is right, she's gonna hit her so far back Ruth won't have any choice but to cave in my every word. Me fucking Mary was a minor set back to the whole plan, but who am I to turn down a woman who wants nothing more than some attention. Women are all the same-all talk about respect and trust and all that shit but the moment you give 'em a good fuck, they come beggin.

Arriving home, I head straight to my bed fully aware that I don't have to be at work until 8. After kicking Ruth out, I've gotten used to sleeping alone, and that's the way I plan to keep it. Sleeping with Mary wasn't that bad but it's just not for me. I've already complicated things enough when its come to her. No need to make it any worse. I set my alarm and finally fall into a deep sleep. I'm dreaming...

Suddenly I smell fries, but not just any fries, I smell those disgusting seasoned fries from Deena's Diner. I sit down. The waitress comes up to me and asks, "Whaddya wanttoday Jackie?" I look down at the menu and see the scars on my knuckles. I realize I've had this dream before.. only its not a dream, it's happened before. "Just get me a coffee. Black." She walks away and look around the place. I see all the lonely deserted souls you normally find around Watershed, I notice a couple of teenaged boys shoving each other to see whose going to talk to that stripper I see Wednesday nights whose picking over a salad, and then I see her out the window. But instead of taking in the black coffee, I run out into the sun up to her. "Ruth! Ruth!," I call after her looking to see where she might have gone. "Ruth!," I continue until finally spot her. She's about to meet him but I stop her. "Ruth, how did we get here? How did we get here?," I cry while I hold her in my arms like I once in what seems like a lifetime ago. She begins to look at me like she once did back in those days, "You can change it. You know what to do."I hear the buzzers blaring. "I have to go," she says. "No! NO!" I try to grab her but she gets lost in the crowd on the streets. "I can't change it now Ruth! It's done! It's-"

I wake up to the alarm buzzing in my ear. Month after month after month, I have this dream-only its not a dream, it's just a re-play of that day. But instead of just watching her look for me, I stop her. I stop her before she gets to him. Before she left me. Fuckin bitch. She's just a fuckin bitch. A fuckin bitch that's going to pay.

Friday, March 4, 2011

I walked past D.J. and went straight up to the third floor. I was here for business and business only. 13B. Here was the door. BANG BANG BANG "MARQUIS OPEN UP THE DOOR!," I yelled. These visits were getting to happen a lot more frequently for me and I was tired of having to make them after my days at the office. "MARQ-...," I stopped yelling once I saw a young boy open the door. He looked as if he were only 7. "Marquis isn't here, please come by another time," said the boy as he tried to close the door. "Nice try boy," I said and pushed open the door. "QUIS! I KNOW YOU'RE HERE! GET OUT HERE! GET OUT HERE NOW!" The apartment- if you want to call it that- was dark and smelled of weed. That's all this nigga ever does. There were dirty clothes piled in the hallway leading to the two back rooms. The boy had gone to the couch to watch television but I felt his fearful eyes glance at me from the corner of his eyes. My eyes soon adjusted to dim light and I found myself in the midst of nothing but dust and garbage. "Go get Quis boy," I said without looking. The boy quickly got up and ran to the bedroom on the left. "Quis, please come out. Please come out Quis." Sorry as nigga, got his little brother coverin for him and shit. Sorry ass. A moment passed, and I saw him. 6'6, dark and built with muscle from football, Quis had grown up from the scrawny neighborhood boy that used to annoy the hell out of me when I came over to talk to Ruth. Ruth. My mind snapped to the business I was about to handle.

D.J. did nothing but glance my way as I walked back outside into the rain.As I got into my car, I looked back up to apartment 13B and saw her face look down at me. When she locked eyes with me, the curtains shut. Business handled, I thought and drove to the bar to meet Mary.

It's been 6 months since that bitch burnt down my home. 6 months of re-building from scratch all that I worked for all my life. My home was a representation of all my year's hustlin out of nowhere to become the powerful man my dad told me I would never become. "You're a nigga from nowhere and neva goin' anywhere," was all my dad ever said to me. I ain't no punk ass bitch that wanted daddy's approval but to have a man that everyone feared, everyone hated, everyone kneel down to his command, say that to me only made me want to become even more feared, even more hated and have everything livin bow down to me. It was all a dream and then that dumb bitch burnt it all down. I gave that hoe everything she wanted and this is how she re-paid me; burnin down my house just because she couldn't live up to my standards. But I know not everything in that house turned into ashes...

I step out the car in run inside The Bar before the rain could get all over my jacket. "You're usual, Jacques?," Tom asks me. "Yeah. Where's Mary?," I ask looking around the place filled with nothing but beaten down old men downing their miserable lives in the form of a bottle of Jack. "She's in the back. I'll let her know you're here." I down my drink before Mary even reaches me.

"It means everything to her because it means everything to me. She wants to make me suffer. She's only hurting herself."

"I guess, I would think her and Demonte would have- never mind. Are you ready to go?," she says quickly.

"Yeah, get your stuff."

I know what she was about to say. They would have ran off by now, if I hadn't gotten D.J. laid off his job making it impossible for him to pay all his debts. And that bitch won't show her face. By the time he is even considered for a job around here, I'll have everything I need from both of them. Mary re-appears, "OK, lets go." We walk outside and notice the ambulance still cleaning up after the accident. Dumbass boxer. We get into the car and head to my new home. On the way I notice a strange limo parked in the back behind that nasty ass Vietnamese restaurant Vietnamese restaurant. What the fuck is going on there? I turned to see what was going on until "Honey, I really want to go home." The only reason I listened to her was because I was worn out to. I'll just get Johnny to check it out and continued on my way home.