The eyes are the windows of the soul, they give away our emotions and our interest. Maintaining good eye contact is an art. It is commonly misunderstood that more eye contact is always better, but this is not always the case. There is a delicate balance to maintaining your direction of your gaze into the other person's eyes and breaking that contact for brief intervals. Too much eye contact can be intimidating, too little may imply a lack of interest or lack of self-confidence.

Maintain nice, friendly eye contact with breaks.

Don't be a 'Mr. Stare' or 'Ms. Glare.' No one likes to be peered at, it can give the wrong impression.

When your eyes start to shut and you have to prop up your face, you are definitely giving off the vibe that you are not interested.

Alert but aloof! It's ok to look away but don't forget to check back in or you could seem like you are lost in a daydream or not listening.

As you can see, how and when you use eye contact can be an important form of non-verbal communication. It can be used to express interest and open a channel of understanding between two people. However, the length and intensity of eye contact can change its meaning. Also, different cultures can interpret eye contact in their own unique ways and there are certain socially accepted norms that vary across the globe. Seem complicated? It can be.

Eye Contact around the World:

For us in the U.S., eye contact is always said to be important. If you maintain good eye contact with someone, it displays you are confident and in control. But how much is too much? Or too little? Have you ever met those people who take eye contact to the extreme? They stand a little too close, giving you a long, purposeful gaze that can last minutes without release? At what point does 'good eye contact' cross over to just plain creepy?

The etiquette of eye contact in France, Spain, Germany and other European countries is similar to the rules we discussed above in the United States. However, in some cultures, direct eye contact can be considered aggressive, confrontational, rude or even disrespectful. This is traditionally the case in Asian, Indian, African and most Latin-American cultures. In these areas, avoiding or using minimal eye contact with others can be thought of as a sign of respect and keeping peace with those who 'out-rank' you such as your elders, teachers or bosses. In the Muslim world, a man maintaining eye contact with another man is a sign of trustworthiness and honesty, however, women and men usually use minimal eye contact or avoid it altogether. Travelers to other countries, particularly on business, should take it upon themselves to learn about cultural norms in the country they are visiting so that they can better communicate with people there without any misunderstandings.

Practicing the art of good eye contact is a nice idea but it is always best to be yourself. Read the situation and use the other person's behavior as feedback to determine how much eye contact to give. Do what feels comfortable for you and what seems to be most comfortable for the other person. Eye contact demonstrates self-confidence, a willingness to listen and is an important part of body language so practice using it to better convey your emotions, ideas and opinions in a positive, friendly way. Doing so can take your communication and social interaction skills to the next level.

( The original version of this article was previously posted on my blog).