Sorry I am a bit late starting this. I hope y'all are still hanging in there with me.
One of the traits of a hn baby is to not be a self soother. I have been recently been slipping this lil stuffed froggy in with S. It is mine and probably really smells like me. I snuggle "prudence" in when nursing for naps, in the night and also when going to sleep. My hope is that when she is transitiong between sleep patterns she won't need to fully wake or if she does stir she will smell familliar scents and drift off back to sleep. Any thoughts on this? Anyone ever "teach" a baby or toddler to self soothe?
Sarah

I taught my son (toddler) to self-soothe..but he's not HN and it wasn't all that difficult....but he somehow forgot and the only way I can get him to sleep for nap or bedtime is to sit with him and watch a movie that he likes. We saw the ped the other day to rule out ear infection (in my HN 10mo old), and...I asked for a 2nd opinion (diff. ped) for an issue that the previous ped had a problem with...the ped we saw for his 9mo appt asked how his sleeping was...and he just went off on this wild tangent and made me really mad...anyway, got a 2nd opinion from a diff ped the other day and he didn't agree with the "diagnosis" but pretty much agreed with the "treatment". First ped prescribed an antihistamine as a sleeping aid...I did NOT get it filled. He said to use the drug and use CIO. 2nd ped said no drugs, but to CIO...like where you go in at certain intervals....and i just told him...well, really this is a nonissue for me...I'm used to his night waking and it doesn't bother me....i only wanted a 2nd opinion to reassure me that his sleeping issues weren't something more serious.

ANYWAY....my 10 mo old (HN) is NOT a self soother and I doubt he'll ever be! I'm not convinced that his sleeping issues aren't something more serious..but I don't think it's apnea or anything like that...i'm thinking more along the lines of an adhd type of thing. And please don't anyone take that the wrong way....I do think he'll be adhd, but I'm not wanting to jump on the medication band wagon....not that there is anything WRONG with meds, and not that there is anything right with them either! I hope I don't get flamed

I have 2 kiddos. One is HN and the other is the complete opposite. My HN's child will be 3 in October and still cannot soothe herself, and i doubt she ever will be able to. I find this topic incredibly interesting as my mother tells me i was a HN child (and sometimes still am as an adult) and at times I still cannot self-soothe. Meaning, at times in my life when the worst happens i just need my mom or my dh by my side. I was what the docs tried to classify as ADD but my mother smartly always refused meds. My daughter is incredibly full throttle but i wouldnt classify her as ADD. I also notice then when i am committed 100% to her every need and giving her fulfillment and attention (ie not getting frustrated with her when she cries because she tripped for the 50th time lol) that her needs seem to be easier for me to handle. This is why i never allowed CIO either. Im going off here lol. Sorry! As i said, at times im still HN myself.

So does HN= Add/adhd? I was/am ADD. I had a brief bout with ritalin. I cannot self soothe either. I always attributed my lack of self soothing to my parents poor parenting skills and abusive upbringing. Now I wonder.... I hope not. I think in several directions at once. It is very annoining sometimes.
I was told today to wean dd esp night wean. I was told this by a dentist as she has dental caries. I have not a clue if this is possible. Or if I should do this to her at all. Maybe just get the dental work done and say ah well they are baby teeth. I dunno. My head is spinning. The milk probably is pooling in her mouth. She can nurse literaly all night long and often does.
Any suggestions?

Sarah, how old? And i think they are insane for telling youto wean dc. I night weaned my dd at 14 months but only because i couldnt take the constant nite wakings and it was hard for me to do. But i wouldnt listen to a dentist. It is only their baby teeth. I know that with dd at 14 months dh walked hre the first few nights while she fussed for me. She had to be out of our room though when he did this, within a week she was sleeping thru the night with a binky as replacement. Not sure if that helps.

oh my today was a bad HN day for me & Gavin He was VERY clingy today and VERY cranky know what too? I found myself getting frustrated about it (which does not happen often) and I hated myself for being frustrated! I didn't get angry with him or anything, but I worry that he can sense when I am frustrated, and I just don't like feeling that way anyways kwim? I am going to steal your idea about a self soothing item, getting my scent on something... it was hard to do much of anything at all today, so basically nursed & snuggled him most of the day & got on here as he slept on my chest lol I need major support from other Mamas who understand today... I tried talking to my Mum & hubby about how I hated that I got frustrated but they didn't seem to really understand where I was coming from

TOTALLY understand where you're coming from. Lyssa (my HN angel ) today had the tummy flu. We started off the day with throwing up all over my bed at 6:30 am. Well through out the day she was clingy, whiny and just a pain. In my head i told myself over and over, its not her fault shes sick. But out of my mouth came, Alyssa go lay down. And i came across so frustrated. Which was the last thing i wanted to do. HN babies are soooo hard sometimes. And i cant really discuss it with my mom, because she just says its payback for the type of baby i was.

see my Mom was like well just be mad at yourself then (for being frustrated) she said you are still young so you don't have a lot of patience?!?!?! thanks Mom! IT totally ticks me off cause sometimes I hollar at DSS if he is not listening, and she tell me PATIENCE, yet she yells at my bro & sis all the time, I feel like telling her take a step back & look at you before you tell ME patience kwim? then hubby says it's natural to get frustrated, it's just all how you deal with it, as long as you don't act on it! WTF? Yeah I am going to hurt the baby or something??? That just made me sick! UGH

My 4yo was/is HN...and he's now potty-trained, sleeping through the night, self-weaned, and even happy to stay with a sitter or IL's for a few hours without trauma. It really DOES get better over time! I remember so many days when he was an infant/toddler I thought I would LOSE MY MIND lol but looking back, oddly enough, those moments of endless cuddling, soothing, etc. have become treasured memories. But the sight of him playing independently fills me with a joy that's indescribable...probably because we waited so long for it. Anyway, hang in there! You will surivive!