Thursday, October 19, 2006

The Wrath of Harley

A re-enactment of yesterday's events:

Harley had ordered a bed from an online purveyor of such conveniences. She tendered them the requisite amount of money, and a covenant was struck. A codicil of this covenant was that UPS would deliver said bed to Her abode.

She, sick and tired, remained in Her abode the whole day in its entirety. Yea, she did not leave even to procure OJ for Herself. Yet UPS did not come. It was morning, it was evening, and yet UPS did not come. The covenant had been broken and She was wroth. The fire of Her wrath would rain down upon the customer service representative. Many times did she call to UPS, yet they did not answer Her. "It is coming" they said, "we cannot tell you when" they said. Harley is patient, yet even her patience has an end.

Again she called, and this time UPS answered: "We delivered it. No one was home." At this She was filled with righteous indignation and demanded to know whether the bell that had been rung was the upstairs bell, or the downstairs bell. For She lives in the downstairs apartment, as was specified in the covenant. She shamed UPS, yet they were unrepentant. "There are no more drivers today" claimed the customer service representative. Harley was now full of sick and of irritation, yet Her temper She did not lose. She replaced the phone and made an oath that never again would she patronize UPS. And also that She would write a letter, and that it would be very angry indeed.

3 comments:

Will you write my letter, Ben? Annie? I always lose my righteous indignation when I sit down. My letters tend to sound like: "Hi. Sorry to bother you, but you maybe kind of inconvenienced me yesterday and I know that you're very busy, but I did call and double check that you knew I was on the first floor, not upstairs and I was quite ill and stuck in my apartment and I know you're very busy, but I think that was maybe an oversight on your part that caused me to be inconvenienced." I know my letter will sound like that because that is what I said on the phone last night. Verbatum.

I won't write your letter for you, but I will join you in your righteous indignation. One time they tried to convince me that Upper Manhattan is in the Bronx and wouldn't it be convenient for me to pick up my !@#% package (during working hours, of course) at their warehouse in the Bronx?? Nowadays I just have stuff UPS'd to work, which is pretty hard to do with a bed... unless you work at a bed store, but then, why would you be ordering a bed from someone else...that would be pretty silly, I would think.