Martin Amis told Hay festival-goers last week that women write sex scenes better than men — "Once a man is writing a sex scene he's feeling omnipotent... but women don't, and they write better about it," he said — so the Guardian put together an x-rated quiz to test that out. (Possibly NSFW if your boss likes to read over your shoulder.)

I scored a 3/10 — "Arctic," the Guardian informed me — maybe because Amis' quote gave me false courage that
all of the best lines would be written by women/no woman would (spoiler!!) call her vagina a "warm, wet cave."