drinking – Gurl.comhttp://www.gurl.com
A teen site and community for teenage girlsFri, 09 Dec 2016 00:00:50 +0000en-UShourly1https://wordpress.org/?v=4.4.213 Important Things Every Girl Needs To Know About Drinkinghttp://www.gurl.com/2016/09/07/important-drinking-facts-for-teen-girls/
http://www.gurl.com/2016/09/07/important-drinking-facts-for-teen-girls/#respondWed, 07 Sep 2016 20:00:19 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=235824The first time I had alcohol, it was an accident. I was in my early teens at some hotel for brunch, and what I thought was an innocent glass of orange juice in a fancy champagne flute was actually champagne mixed with orange juice. I wasn’t expecting it, so the burning sensation that surged through … Read More

]]>The first time I had alcohol, it was an accident. I was in my early teens at some hotel for brunch, and what I thought was an innocent glass of orange juice in a fancy champagne flute was actually champagne mixed with orange juice. I wasn’t expecting it, so the burning sensation that surged through my mouth was an absolute shock. I ran to the bathroom and spit it out. Okay, maybe that doesn’t count as my first time drinking alcohol… maybe I should fast forward to the time that I was 17 going on 18, drinking red wine at a restaurant in Paris and feeling grown AF. Many times before and after that, I was around alcohol while underage and totally had opportunities to drink like plenty of other teens do, but I didn’t because I was afraid of anything that resembled rule breaking. As you can imagine, my teen rebellion phase wasn’t very rebellious. It wasn’t until my college years that I began to drink occasionally, but I didn’t really engage in much of a campus drinking culture.

I’m not trying to paint myself as some kind of saint or a special snowflake, and when all is said and done, there isn’t much of a moral high ground to be found when it comes to underage drinking. Let’s be real: Drinking happens. Most of us come into contact with alcohol in some way, shape, or form in high school, and it’s impossible to go to a college party without alcohol. So while I’m not going to encourage anyone reading this to drink underage, I think it’s an even bigger insult to act as if nobody reading this will ever consume alcohol before they turn their legal drinking age. Even with my tame history of alcohol consumption, I drank alcohol before I was 21-years-old. It just happens, and it’s better to know what to do in case you do decide to drink than to be totally clueless. So why not familiarize yourself with these 13 important things every girl needs to know about drinking. Believe me, you probably know less than you think you do.

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Know What Binge Drinking Really Is For YOU

The quick and dirty of binge drinking is this: Binge drinking is a pattern of heavy drinking in a short amount of time. In the United States, 90 percent of underage drinking is binge drinking. And get this: The definition differs for men and women. For men, binge drinking is drinking five or more drinks in a two hour period. For women, it's four.

By the way, one drink is usually equivalent to half of an ounce of alcohol. Think of that as one regular beer. A cocktail can equal a drink and a half to two drinks and there are five to six drinks in a bottle of wine. So, drink wisely!

Dazed And Confused

Everyone's Limits Are Different

Nobody reacts the same way to the same amount of alcohol. There's a reason why some folks are considered lightweights while others have a crazy amount of stamina when it comes to drinking. For example, maybe you're at most tipsy after three, but your friend gets incoherent halfway into drink number two. Size, genes, tolerance, and a whole host of other things can explain why some people can drink all night and wake up with a killer hangover, while others feel just fine. What's important, though, is that you figure out what your own limits are instead of trying to just keep up with someone else's. You'll either find this out the easy way, or the hard way, but no matter what, it's important info.

The O.C.

Never Drink On An Empty Stomach

Whether you're a drinker or not, there's one thing you must know: Never drink on an empty stomach. Seriously, you'll regret it like crazy. Having some food in your gut helps prevent alcohol from absorbing into your blood stream so quickly. That's why you're going to get a lot drunker a lot faster if you skip dinner or only eat a light snack before drinking. Maybe you like getting drunk so quickly. Okay, fine, but I can assure you that you won't like puking halfway through the night, or waking up with a killer hangover. If you think you've drank too much and ate too little, try to eat as much as you can before bed. Your body will thank you.

Stay Hydrated

Don't forget to drink water while you're drinking. Alcohol dehydrates the hell out of your system! Why? Because alcohol is a diuretic, which makes you pee a lot (leading to even less water in your system). You know how people feel super hungover after drinking a lot? They feel so gross because they're dehydrated, and probably didn't have enough water the night before. If you or a friend ever end up super drink, make sure to get that water consumption on. It'll prevent a lot of nastiness later.

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Don't Underestimate Wine

I think it's safe to say that when folks imagine a bunch of wasted underage people, they assume that beer or hard liquor was involved. Well, that might be true, but that doesn't mean that they, you, or anyone else should underestimate the power of a glass (or four) of wine. People think of wine as less of a threat because of its classy reputation. But remember that wine contains more alcohol per volume than beer, and all it takes is a bottle and some conversation between friends to down a bottle of wine in no time. So, yeah, wine can get you just as wasted as beer or cocktails, and they're responsible for some seriously gnarly hangovers, too. Beware, dude.

Some Girls

Never Let A Drunk Person Sleep On Their Back

This is an important rule to know whether you drink or not: If your friend or somebody you know is super wasted and you help put them to bed, never leave them on their back. Try to arrange them so that they're on their side? Why? If that person pukes in their sleep, they can choke on it and die if they're on their back. However, if they're on their side, gravity will help make sure the vomit makes its way out of the body. Gross, yes, but this little thing can save someone's life.

Clueless

Understand Laws Regarding Alcohol And Sexual Consent

Most states have laws which state that you cannot consent to sex if you are drunk. How drunk? That depends a lot on interpretation, but generally drunk enough to have little control over your actions. Does that mean that don't have consensual hookup sessions after drinking? Of course not, it happens all the time. But by law, you're getting into some dangerous territory, and for fair reason: Alcohol makes clarity a lot harder, including in the realm of sex and communication. Laws that specify that consent can not be granted while under the influence give legal protection to those who might be in a vulnerable situation, like sexual assault. This is just one reason why its important to be extra cautious about sexual activity if you're under the influence of alcohol.

Watch Your Drinks

If there's one thing you're better off being paranoid about, it's your drinks. I'm not saying that everyone who gives you a drink has nefarious intent--some cute guy at a bar or a party might really just want to flirt with you a little bit and get you on their good side--but you can never be too careful. Seemingly harmless strangers and even people you thought were your acquaintances can put "date rape" drugs like GHB, Rohypnol, or other substances that can lead to unsuspecting victims suffering from unconsciousness, memory loss, and more. If someone grabs you a drink, either decline or just let them know that you're going to get your own drink. If they're not a d-bag, they'll respect your choice.

My Mad Fat Diary

NEVER Mix Alcohol And Pills

Seriously, I don't mean to sound like a Very Special Episode, but this is so serious. Mixing alcohol with pills (prescription drugs, street drugs, etc) can be really deadly. Some chemicals just aren't meant to mix with each other. Think of it this way: Alcohol is a downer, AKA a depressant, which lowers your mental and physical activity and can slow down everything from your muscle coordination to your heart or breathing rate. Now, imagine if you mixed that with downer in pill form, like Xanax. You're doing double duty, which could lower something like your heart rate to deadly levels. Mixing your alcohol with an upper like coke or amphetamines can also put your body under a lot of pressure because it's confused about what it should be doing. Basically, if you're going to drink, just drink. Don't mix your alcohol with anything else, your life could depend on it.

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Don't Assume That You Can Be Too Young To Have A Drinking Problem

There's so much scare tactics out there when it comes to alcohol education that it's really easy for us to downplay the dangerous effect that alcohol actually has on people. That's why you can't assume that that friend of yours who drinks isn't just drinking for fun, but might actually have a drinking problem. Be on the lookout for friends who drink excessively, drink at odd hours, suffer from mental health issues, or has a family history of alcoholism/substance abuse. Alcoholism doesn't discriminate against race or gender, class or religion...age is no exception.

My So-Called Life

It's More Important To Risk Trouble Than Risk Having A Friend Die

When I was a senior in college, I witnessed my suite mate getting dragged into our dorm by her friends. My suit mate was barely conscious and had no control whatsoever of her body. They did a lot of hmming and hawing over what they should do, because they were more afraid of getting into trouble for drinking than they were concerned about their friend. Luckily, they came to their senses and she was taken away on an ambulance; she was fine, but what if her condition was a lot worse? Nobody wants to get into trouble, obviously, but when things are looking grim, do not prioritize your worry of getting yelled at over the life of somebody you care about Imagine if it was you who needed medical assistance?

Jawbreaker

There Are A Lot Of Physical Side Effects Of Drinking Aside From Being Drunk

We all know that drinking can lead to getting drunk, which can lead to clumsiness, loose lips, puke sessions, and bad headaches in the morning. But there are other side effects of drinking that you don't really know or think about until you actually experience them. As I said earlier, drinking makes you dehydrated, which causes your body to retain water. This can cause some serious tummy bloating; drink often enough and expect to experience some face bloating as well. Alcohol also contains a fair amount of calories, especially when it comes to heavy beers or sugary cocktails; this can lead to weight gain. For frequent drinkers, alcohol can also break down capillaries, which can lead to a ton of face redness and bloodshot eyes. Also, too much drinking doesn't just have a negative impact on your liver, it can also leave you skin dry and older looking and make your hair brittle. Drinking now and then isn't the end of the world, but on a regular basis? You can experience some side effects inside and outside.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

You Don't Have To Be Wasted To Get Busted For a DUI

If you think that everyone who gets a DUI is totally drunk, think again. In the United States, you can be arrested for driving under the influence if you have a blood alcohol content (BAC) of 0.08 percent. Many people go with the unwritten rule that if you don't have more than one drink per hour, then you're solid. Think of it as one beer or one glass of wine. But everything from weight, to mood, to how much one ate that day can determine how this translates in your BAC, even if you drank with a meal over a couple of hours. Also, it's worth knowing that if an officer pulls you over and your BAC is under 0.08 percent, but thinks you're not capable of driving responsibly, you can still get arrested. When in doubt--or even almost leaning toward doubt--have someone sober drive you home or snag a cab. You can still hurt yourself or someone else even if you're buzzed.

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2016/09/07/important-drinking-facts-for-teen-girls/feed/09 Things You DON’T Have To Do Before You’re 18http://www.gurl.com/2016/08/19/9-things-you-dont-have-to-do-before-youre-18/
http://www.gurl.com/2016/08/19/9-things-you-dont-have-to-do-before-youre-18/#respondFri, 19 Aug 2016 19:00:35 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=232565All things considered, I was a bit of an accidental prude in high school. Sure, I had an outgoing personality with an outgoing worthy wardrobe to match–I’m still cringing about some of my style choices, that’s called growing up–but I left high school without smoking pot, getting drunk, having a boyfriend, or hooking up. For … Read More

]]>All things considered, I was a bit of an accidental prude in high school. Sure, I had an outgoing personality with an outgoing worthy wardrobe to match–I’m still cringing about some of my style choices, that’s called growing up–but I left high school without smoking pot, getting drunk, having a boyfriend, or hooking up. For the record, I’m not bragging about any of this. If anything, I wish I was a little more adventurous and willing to take more risks (within reason), but that’s just not the way it worked. I definitely allowed myself to indulge a little more in college, but at the end of the day I’m a girl who didn’t have her first kiss until she was 23-years-old and only lost her v-card earlier this year.

And guess what? I’ve managed to survive and navigate the world as a pretty well adjusted chick who loves hanging out with friends, dancing like an idiot at rock shows, and wearing sheet masks when I’m feeling fancy. Oh, and I have a boyfriend now too. Wow, who would have thought? Well, anyone who doesn’t have a rigid idea of what goal posts you should hit in your teens and knows that your teen years shouldn’t be seen as the best days of your life would know that. But too many of us end up feeling like something is wrong with us if we’ve never been kissed by a certain age, or if we’ve never rebelled all that much.There are a lot more people out there like you than you think, just know that what happens will happen. Maybe you’ll try a cigarette one day and hate it, maybe you’ll kiss a stranger and love it. Regardless, you’ve got time, so stop thinking you’ll miss out on living your best life if you don’t do these 9 things by the time you’re 18-years-old.

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Smoke A Cigarette

You shouldn't smoke because it's a disgusting habit, but people experiment, and you might too. But if you haven't done it yet...you really aren't missing out on much. Seriously. Side note: I had a crush on a guy in senior year who reeked of cigarettes every day after lunch. My thirst couldn't look past the reek.

A First Kiss

Like I said in the intro, I didn't get my first kiss until I was 23-years-old, so even in college my lips didn't see any action. If you're in this boat, you're honestly not alone. There are soooo many more people out there in your situation than you think. Besides, maybe you're going to have a stellar first kiss with somebody more experienced than a sloppy one with a 14-year-old boy.

Smoking Pot

Of all of the risky things to do, smoking pot is probably the least harmful. You'll likely be in a situation at some point soon (if you haven't already) in which you're offered some. But like, no matter what, nobody is going to roast you if your first experience with pot isn't until you're older. Nobody is going to interrogate you about this, I promise.

Drinking

I felt like such a weirdo for never drinking at parties in high school. I drink now, but I'm low key glad that I'm old enough to know my limits, something I probably wouldn't have known when I was 16-years-old.

Sexting

To be on the safe, ultra paranoid side, sending nude photos of yourself while underage is pretty risky anyway (technically child pornography).

Having A BF/GF

A lot less people have relationships in high school than you think. Plenty of people might hook up but never have a real, true blue romance. It'll happen, chill.

Going To A Crazy Party

High school parties are fun, but a lot of them aren't even like the movies anyway. If you don't go to some, you're not missing much. College parties on the other hand...

Hooking Up

Everyone does the nasty at different ages. Yes, most people lose their v-card before college, but a lot of people don't. Hell, I didn't, and I knew a lot of other girls who were in the same boat as me.

Knowing What You WAnt To Do With Your Life

It can be tough to see a lot of teenagers who are out there and making a name for themselves already...while you're just spending your day scrolling through Instagram. Yo, people do things at different paces. It. Is. Okay. You don't have to know what your career trajectory will be as a teen. I'm in my 20s and I'm surrounded by people who still don't really know what they're doing. You're good.

Have you felt weird about not accomplishing something on this list yet? Are you already over 18 and have any insight to share? Tell us in the comments!

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2016/08/19/9-things-you-dont-have-to-do-before-youre-18/feed/022 Signs You’re Actually Obsessed With Coffeehttp://www.gurl.com/2015/10/02/signs-you-are-obsessed-with-coffee-addict/
http://www.gurl.com/2015/10/02/signs-you-are-obsessed-with-coffee-addict/#respondFri, 02 Oct 2015 21:30:16 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=195323My first coffee came from a man I was working with when I was 18. He handed me a styrofoam Dunkin Donuts medium, light and sweet, with the rest of my change. “They were out of iced tea,” he told me. I sipped it slowly, having finally reached a new level of New York Art … Read More

]]>My first coffee came from a man I was working with when I was 18. He handed me a styrofoam Dunkin Donuts medium, light and sweet, with the rest of my change. “They were out of iced tea,” he told me. I sipped it slowly, having finally reached a new level of New York Art Professional: I was now a committed coffee drinker.

I remember my first cup of coffee with the same romantic nostalgia I reserve for first kisses. Why?

As a kid I swore to never be THAT grown up who couldn’t live or breathe without their daily cup of coffee – no, that’s far too cliche. Welp color me basic, dudes, because I’m here and I am all about my coffee. It makes me a fully functioning, happy person.

Oh, coffee, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways (*counts* there’s 22. I love you in 22 different ways, bae. We all do.)

1) It’s the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning

Roll over and kiss IRL boo? Nah. #priorities

2) You get an awful headache when you miss your crucial caffeine window.

Did you think I was exaggerating when I said it made me a functioning, happy person? Caffeine headaches suck the most. We all know our exact unit of time: mine is two hours.

3) You have multiple brew-at-home coffee making options.

Would you like the French press? Or the Keurig? Or the instant? Or the pour-over? Or the standard communal pot of coffee? Oh, you’d like espresso. Well, in that case I have…

4) You know what you like in your coffee, like it’s science.

And you get weirdly science-y about it, too. There are exact sugar measurements and cream measurements that must be executed in these precise ratios depending on volume of liquid coffee. What’s more, is you know this like the back of your hand and can execute your perfect cup like it isn’t complex math.

5) That magical moment of pre-stir coffee + cream.

It’s the way they dance together. It’s f**king beautiful.

6) Your mug game is too strong.

Flexing.

7) There’s nothing like the first sip of hot coffee on a cold day.

8) Except, maybe, the first sip of iced coffee on a hot day.

9) You have iron-clad opinions on decaf.

It’s placebo replacement nonsense.

10) … and bulletproof.

Butter in my coffee? *shrugs* I mean, if you say so, my friends who do Crossfit.

I know everyone’s obsessed with pumpkin spice, but it’s got nothing on my summer-jam: blueberry iced coffee with a bit of vanilla.

14) Where you’re going to get your coffee is the first question you ask when you go on vacation.

Or when you stay overnight anywhere, TBH. Your second question is “what’s the wifi password?”

15) It’s also the first question you ask when apartment hunting.

Must be under $1,000 per bedroom and within 2 blocks to at least 4 different places you can get a cup of coffee.

16) You cherish the relationship you have with your local coffee shop.

They know your name, your order, and a little bit about your life. And you know and care about them. They are important people in your life.

17) Your wallet has a stack of frequent cuppa punch cards.

There’s your place, the place by your friend’s house, the place where you write, the place by work, and the place by your boyfriend/girlfriend’s house. All of them give you a free 11th cup of coffee for your patronage and bless them, honestly, because any day that’s free coffee day is the best day ever.

18) When you can’t go local, you have a preferred chain that you’re equally loyal to.

As an east coaster who moved to Los Angeles, I had to switch from Dunkin Donuts to Starbucks and while I don’t consider myself a sell-out, it’s hard not to feel that way sometimes.

19) The passenger seat of your car is a graveyard of empty disposable coffee cups.

Guilty. I had to get a trash bag just for my car to remedy that problem.

20) Coffee is either a deal maker or a deal breaker for you.

Some people can’t deal with people who don’t share the habit. The way I see it is you don’t have someone messing with your coffee stuff. The coffee cabinet is your sacred space you don’t have to share. Win! (And yes, I said coffee cabinet. Get on my level.)

21) But you know that *true love* is when he/she brings you coffee.

In the morning. Or when I’m working and either too busy or lazy to get up and get it myself. Please. I will latte heart you forever.

22) You get weirdly defensive when someone calls it an addiction.

I’d prefer you not talk about my husband like that. My marriage is none of your business. (Love you forever, coffee. xoxoxo)

Do you love coffee? What did we forget to include? Tell us in the comments.

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2015/10/02/signs-you-are-obsessed-with-coffee-addict/feed/015 Things You’re Sick Of Hearing If You Don’t Drink Alcoholhttp://www.gurl.com/2015/06/09/things-youre-sick-of-hearing-if-you-dont-drink-alcohol/
http://www.gurl.com/2015/06/09/things-youre-sick-of-hearing-if-you-dont-drink-alcohol/#respondTue, 09 Jun 2015 21:09:41 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=182816I don’t really drink alcohol very often, and while I’m okay with that now, it took me a long time to get to that point. For a while, I tried to hide the fact that I didn’t like drinking by drinking. I had fun, but it just wasn’t the lifestyle for me. When I realized … Read More

]]>I don’t really drink alcohol very often, and while I’m okay with that now, it took me a long time to get to that point. For a while, I tried to hide the fact that I didn’t like drinking by drinking. I had fun, but it just wasn’t the lifestyle for me. When I realized that, I started to slowly shy away from drinking, but it alienated me from others a little bit. In fact, one of my biggest issues with not drinking has always been dealing with the reactions of others.

There’s no denying that we live in a society that loves alcohol. Every event is made into hours of marathon drinking, whether it’s a holiday, going out to dinner, sports games, or any sort of event. When you don’t drink, you’re not in the majority. And while I understand people being curious about my reasons behind not drinking, I don’t understand the harassment that comes with it. Why do you care if I’m sober? I don’t get it!

If you’re in the same boat as me, I know you understand what I’m talking about. Here are 15 things you’re sick of hearing if you don’t drink alcohol – and everyone, please stop saying this stuff!

1. Why don’t you drink?

Look, I know you’re probably just being curious. It’s just that people usually ask this question, and then don’t accept the answer, which is “I don’t want to.” Ask this question if you’re not going to be a jerk when I answer.

2. That sounds pretty boring.

It’s not. I don’t judge anyone for drinking, but I do not need alcohol to have a good time. And if you do, that’s kind of a problem.

3. I bet I can get you to drink.

Oooh, no one has ever tried that before! Listen, I have no idea why you’re really amped on me drinking. But I don’t do peer pressure, so literally nothing you can say will get me to drink.

4. Oh come on, it’s one drink. What is that REALLY going to do to you?

I don’t know, it might not do anything. I just don’t want it. Get off my back.

5. Take a shot. Just take it! It’s a shot! You have to do it with us!

If I had a dollar for every time someone said this to me, I’d be a very rich person.

6. Can you please drink tonight? For me?

Hmm. No.

7. Drink more! Have one more drink. Come on!

If I had one wish, it would be for people to stop trying to force alcohol down my throat.

8. You can’t come if you’re not drinking. Just kidding. Kind of.

LOL kay.

9. Is it because of health reasons?

That’s personal. If you’re my friend, sure, I’ll tell you. But if you’re just a random person in a bar? Please stop.

10. You need to learn how to relax. Just have a drink.

I don’t need alcohol, dude. Chill.

11. I want to see you wasted so bad.

Why?

12. Are you judging me for drinking?

I literally don’t care what you do. You should try that feeling.

13. So, what do you do since you don’t drink?

Contrary to popular belief, anything you can do drunk can be done sober!

14. Can you drive us all home then?

I mean, yes. Sure. Because I’m not a huge jerk who is going to help someone drink and drive. But please don’t automatically rely on me to drive you and all of your friends around every single time. Try to make your own plans once in a while.

15. Oh… we didn’t invite you because we were gonna drink and figured you wouldn’t want to come.

Oh. How sweet of you.

Which of these can you relate to the most? What did I forget to include? Tell me in the comments.

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2015/06/09/things-youre-sick-of-hearing-if-you-dont-drink-alcohol/feed/010 Things I Wish I Knew Before My First College Partyhttp://www.gurl.com/2013/09/18/what-to-do-at-first-college-party-tips-advice/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/09/18/what-to-do-at-first-college-party-tips-advice/#respondWed, 18 Sep 2013 20:00:09 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=123068My first college party sucked. I stood by a bowl of dubious mixed drinks the whole night and wasn’t interested in grinding with some random dude in the basement. I’m a very talkative person, but I felt totally out of my element in that cramped little house just off-campus as my classmates and people I’m … Read More

]]>My first college party sucked. I stood by a bowl of dubious mixed drinks the whole night and wasn’t interested in grinding with some random dude in the basement. I’m a very talkative person, but I felt totally out of my element in that cramped little house just off-campus as my classmates and people I’m sure didn’t go to my school milled around in various states of intoxication.

But you know what? I’m still glad that I went.

I didn’t go to many college parties, but I suggest that everybody experiences at least a couple of them in their college career. Whether you’re a party animal or on the meeker side, it is fascinating to see what your fellow students are like outside of the classroom. Some of them might really surprise you!

College parties are definitely hit or miss, but no matter what there are definitely some things to learn before you attend one. 10 things I definitely wish I knew before going to my first college party.

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Not All Parties Are The Same

College parties differ pretty dramatically. Some are going to really feel out of your element, but others are going to be just what your looking for. The people differ, the music can differ and your over all comfort level can differ. Don't go to one party, have an awful time, and decide to swear off college parties forever. Likewise, don't assume that that awesome party you went to is going to match up to every other party you go to.

If You Don't Drink, That's Cool. If You Do, Be Responsible.

If people are being immature and hassling you about it, just hold a cup and they'll be none the wiser. But if you partake, be responsible. You don't want to be that person your friends have to take care of the whole time. I've been there and it is a crappy job.

Prepare To Talk About Yourself A Lot

You know how Claire from The Breakfast Club didn't really hesitate to talk about herself? Yeah, well, you're going to have to embrace your inner Claire. Just don't "I'm so popular, everybody loves me" like she did.
The "what's your major" game will definitely be played. And people'll want to know where you're from and where you live and basically all of the bare basics aside from your social security number. Don't be shy or assume that your background is boring. Who cares? It's mostly an icebreaker anyway.

Source: Tumblr

Prepare Yourself For Creeps

Especially if there is a lot of dancing involved. They will probably want to dance all up on you and expect you to be down with that. If you're anything like me, you won't be.

Source: PBS

Mingle!

You shouldn't just stay with your protective circle of friends. Talk to some other people who are also lurking by the crappy selections at the snack table.

Don't Get All FOMO About These Parties

Be Vigilant

College parties can be dens of sketchy folks with sketchy behavior. Make sure all your belongings are with you at all times. So many people lose stuff at these parties or finding out that some important items were stolen. Also, know where your cup is at all times and don't accept a drink from anyone. You never know what somebody could have put in it.

Don't Finish Your Semester With An

If you're really into the college party scene, make sure that you're balancing your time wisely. If you're partying all weekend and are too exhausted to actually do the stuff you're at college for, it is going to show, big time. You might not think it will, but when you get those mid-semester marks you'll have one hell of a rude awakening.

It's Fine If You Aren't Into The College Party Scene

Some (okay, a lot) of college parties just suck. They're boring and you're doing the same thing you could be doing around people you actually care about. Not being into college parties doesn't make you a bore or anything like that. You're just not into that scene, and that's fine!

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2013/09/18/what-to-do-at-first-college-party-tips-advice/feed/0I Don’t Really Like Drinking Alcohol And It Makes Me Feel Like An Outcasthttp://www.gurl.com/2013/09/06/i-dont-like-drinking-alcohol-being-drunk-makes-me-feel-like-an-outcast/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/09/06/i-dont-like-drinking-alcohol-being-drunk-makes-me-feel-like-an-outcast/#commentsFri, 06 Sep 2013 20:30:22 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=122373In a world where drinking enough to blow a .341 (that’s A LOT) is basically applauded, I have always stood out as someone who doesn’t really like to drink alcohol that much. Despite a few years in college where I let my wild side come out, I have never been a big drinker – even … Read More

In a world where drinking enough to blow a .341 (that’s A LOT) is basically applauded, I have always stood out as someone who doesn’t really like to drink alcohol that much. Despite a few years in college where I let my wild side come out, I have never been a big drinker – even now, when I’m old enough to do so legally. All of my peers, who take every opportunity they have to get wasted, don’t understand this. And while I’m okay with the fact that I don’t really drink, no one else ever really is. To be honest… it kind of makes me feel like an outcast.

Alcohol has just never really interested me that much. Sure, in high school I drank once in a while – but that was mainly because everyone else was doing it and I didn’t want to feel left out. Then I started dating a straight edge dude who didn’t drink at all and I rarely touched the stuff for the next four years of my life. Like I said, I had my phase in college, but once that passed, I was just kind of over it. Now I barely ever drink and when I do, it’s only a very little bit. I am constantly disappointing my friends by turning down free shots or declining that third drink or shaking my head when they ask, “Are you drunk yet?” I get it, I’m a party pooper. To that I say, sorry I’m not sorry.

There are a lot of reasons I’m not into drinking and even though it’s really no one else’s business, I always feel the need to explain myself. Most people don’t understand why I don’t do it very often. So, I guess I’ll explain here.

I still remember the very first time I got drunk. I was 14-years-old and my parents went away for the weekend. I had a little party, drank maybe two beers and proceeded to say ridiculous things and eventually fall over a two foot fence in front of everyone. The next morning, I woke up slightly confused and very agitated. I had found that being drunk made me feel completely out of control. I hated it.

I’m no perfectionist, but I am someone who enjoys having control over every situation I find myself in. I’m shy, quiet and reserved and I don’t like making a fool out of myself by saying or doing stupid things that I can’t take back. Being drunk makes me act like a completely different person. I become the girl who will talk and flirt with anyone. I say things I would never normally say. I (try to) dance in public. I take endless pictures where I stick my tongue out like it’s cute. And the whole time, I feel like I have no control over what I’m doing because being drunk makes me feel like I don’t care. But when I wake up a few hours later, sober, I do care.

Some people love that alcohol makes them act like a different person. I know a lot of people who rely on alcohol to have a good time and let loose, because without it, they can’t. I was one of those people, for a little while when I was in college. I spent a few years enjoying the fact that I could let myself do silly things once in a while. But that quickly passed and I realized that I actually didn’t like it… I had my fun, but at the end of the day, it stopped being fun and just got old.

Basically.

Even when I was into drinking, I was really a terrible drinker. I was too anxious all the time! I am the kind of person who over-thinks every single thing I do. I care about consequences. I worry way, way too much. I can’t just down six beers and two shots like it’s no big deal. Every time I drink, I spend the entire time reminding myself not to mix different kinds of alcohol. I stress over how I’m going to feel in the morning. I think about how I’m going to get home. Basically, I just think too much and it kind of takes the fun out of drinking.

The other thing I hate about getting drunk? The hangovers the next day. There are few things worse than a really bad hangover and I will do anything I can to avoid them – even if that means avoiding alcohol all together. I hate feeling sick to my stomach. I hate feeling like I can’t move out of my bed. I cannot stand waking up in the morning with a pounding headache and only fuzzy memories of what happened. For me, getting drunk isn’t worth feeling that crappy for an entire day. Yeah, I had fun the night before, but the next day I’m completely out of commission.

Sometimes it feels like I’m the only one who feels this way. All of my friends love to drink so much that they actually tend to get mad at me when I won’t drink with them. When I go out and strangers offer to buy me shots, they give me weird looks when I say, “no thanks.” These reactions are a big part of the reason I rarely go out partying anymore. I hate looking like the grandma in a group of people who are all slurring their words and saying things to me that make no sense. And I really hate when people make me feel like an alien for being sober.

Look, I have nothing against people who like to drink. You want to get wasted? Go ahead (as long as your legal, girls). I don’t judge people for that stuff. So I really, really don’t appreciate it when people give me a problem for my choice not to drink. I mean, I drink once in a while, I just don’t like doing it all the time – and no one can understand that. It is so frustrating to me that it bothers other people so much. Why can’t you just let me do what I want without making me feel bad about it?

I guess that if enjoying being sober makes me weird, then I like being weird. I love a good night out with my girls every once in a while, but for the most part, I like staying in. I’m not ashamed of that and I’m not afraid to say no to people when they try to pressure me to drink, but I would like it if everyone could just get off my back. Just because it feels like most of the people aged 16-30 want to be wasted half their lives doesn’t mean all of us do. You do you and I’ll do me, okay? Thanks.

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2013/09/06/i-dont-like-drinking-alcohol-being-drunk-makes-me-feel-like-an-outcast/feed/49Girls Are Drinking Alcohol More Than Guys–And Facing Dangerous Consequences!http://www.gurl.com/2013/05/24/college-binge-drinking-alcohol-girls/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/05/24/college-binge-drinking-alcohol-girls/#commentsFri, 24 May 2013 18:19:46 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=112362You’re not dumb–you know that drinking alcohol, especially underage drinking, is a huge risk. But what you may not know is exactly how much you’re drinking–to the point of binge drinking. New studies show that not only do young women drink more booze than guys do, but We also have much more dire consequences for … Read More

Drinking alcohol in excess is more dangerous than people thought–and girls are the ones binge drinking! | Source: ShutterStock

You’re not dumb–you know that drinking alcohol, especially underage drinking, is a huge risk. But what you may not know is exactly how much you’re drinking–to the point of binge drinking. New studies show that not only do young women drink more booze than guys do, but We also have much more dire consequences for it.

Women in general are recommended to only have seven drinks per week, while for guys that limit is upped to 14 drinks per week. There’s no sexism behind this, either: our bodies are just functionally different from guys’, so we process alcohol differently and drinking alcohol effects us a lot more strongly and lot more quickly than it does for dudes. (For the science minded: Guys have more of the stomach enzyme gastric alcohol dehydrogenase, which lowers the amount of alcohol that gets into their bloodstreams, allowing them to drink more and feel its effects less.)

Most of the women and girls in the study who drank way over the recommended weekly limit did so in their first few weeks of college. This is a bummer, but it makes sense: Booze is everywhere, and if you don’t know your limits yet, you’re a lot more likely to exceed them until you do.

Aside from the dangerous immediate effects of drinking alcohol excessively–impaired judgment, poor coordination, alcohol poisoning, hangovers, headaches and the upped chance of hooking up with someone you wouldn’t look twice at without beer goggles–there are long-lasting effects of binge drinking. You’re upping your risk not only f or liver damage, liver disease and even breast cancer.

Even scarier? Binge drinking leads to 23,000 deaths for women and girls in the U.S. every year. You already know not to drink and drive (we hope!), so please: Don’t drink and drink and drink and drink. Life’s a lot more fun when you can remember what you did the night before anyway.

Have you ever gone out binge drinking? Has drinking alcohol ever impaired your judgment or health? Have you ever gotten sick from drinking alcohol? Tell us in the comments!

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2013/05/24/college-binge-drinking-alcohol-girls/feed/1What Can You Do When Your Friends Are Bragging About Drinking And Driving?http://www.gurl.com/2013/04/26/friends-bragging-about-drinking-and-driving/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/04/26/friends-bragging-about-drinking-and-driving/#respondFri, 26 Apr 2013 18:33:09 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=108553I trust that all of you know that drinking and driving is dangerous. You understand the irreversible consequences that can occur from getting behind the wheel intoxicated. While individually we know this (in addition to the fact that underage drinking at all is illegal), I’m going to guess that a number of you have a friend who … Read More

There’s no excuse for drinking and driving – and it’s definitely not something to brag about. | Source: Shutterstock.com

I trust that all of you know that drinking and driving is dangerous. You understand the irreversible consequences that can occur from getting behind the wheel intoxicated.

While individually we know this (in addition to the fact that underage drinking at all is illegal), I’m going to guess that a number of you have a friend who doesn’t seem to think driving drunk is that big of a concern.

Students Against Destructive Decisions (SADD) and Liberty Mutual surveyed high school junior and seniors about driving under the influence. Twenty-three percent admitted that they had driven under the influence before (whether it be alcohol, pot or illegal prescription drugs), which is pretty scary.

One thing that really stood out to me was that 19 percent of the teens said they thought that driving under the influence of alcohol actually made them better drivers. Like… WHAT?! That’s not only literally dangerous thinking, but it got me thinking about the people I knew in school who would brag about the times they’d driven drunk.

I consulted with other Gurl staffers and they also knew people who claimed to be “really good” at drunk driving – like it was a cool challenge to try. Newsflash: driving while you’re drunk is not cool or impressive. It’s just highly irresponsible. Those people got very lucky.

Not getting caught for something you shouldn’t be doing isn’t something to celebrate. Yes, thank goodness nobody was injured or hurt, but that situation never should have happened to begin with. A sober driver should have been involved.

But what do you say if you have friends bragging about how they drove home drunk the other night? It can be scary to be the one to speak up in a group conversation or confusing to know what to say so that they get the picture.

I’m usually someone who likes to laugh with the best of them, but when I hear someone talk about their drunk driving like it was NBD, I get really serious, real quick. I find it helps to be straight to the point – “That’s really not something to brag about. It’s not funny and it’s super dangerous.” Another thing you can do is research some specific statistics to really prove your point.

Sometimes when I say this, people give me a hard time or roll their eyes at me. Unfortunately, you can only do so much to change a person’s mind about something. That’s especially frustrating when you know their actions could hurt them or others. Still, at least I can tell myself I’m doing my part by reminding them about the consequences and hoping it made an impact. If they ever make a joke about it again, I’d repeat my same stance.

If you’re in a group, I can guarantee you’re probably not the only one thinking, “What the hell is this person bragging about this for?!” It can be scary to stand up to someone, especially if its a friend of yours. There’s a good chance that when others see you not backing down, they’ll feel more comfortable swooping in to support you. Hopefully it can be an instance where peer pressure actually helps this person realize that their actions have been dangerous and unwise.

If you feel like this is happening with a lot of your friends or you’re not really getting through to them, there may be even bigger steps you can take. One thing you could do is work with your student council or guidance department to put together a presentation for your school that can really showcase the dangers.

Sometimes having a speaker who was personally affected by drunk driving come talk or hearing new statistics can be what makes a person truly realize the dangers. Being an advocate for greater education about drunk driving’s consequences can help those friends and the entire community get on the right track.

So while I know it can be a tough situation, don’t be afraid to speak up and speak from the heart whenever you hear someone bragging about something like this. I hope your friends come to realize that you are doing it from a place of caring and concern for everyone’s safety.

Bringing up the dangers of drunk driving might seem like a “buzzkill” thing to do in these situations, but believe me – it’s a thousand percent better than having someone get killed because of your friend’s risky actions.

Have you ever had a friend brag about drunk driving? What did you do? What advice do you have for someone whose friend may talk about driving drunk? Tell us in the comments!

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2013/04/26/friends-bragging-about-drinking-and-driving/feed/0The Steubenville Rape Case Continues: If You’re Too Drunk To Walk, Chances Are You’re Too Drunk To Give Consenthttp://www.gurl.com/2013/03/14/steubenville-ohio-rape-case/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/03/14/steubenville-ohio-rape-case/#commentsThu, 14 Mar 2013 17:33:42 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=102425The now-infamous Steubenville, Ohio rape case is in its first days of trial this week, and the more details emerge, the scarier it all gets. Witnesses in the case are explaining that the victim, whose name hasn’t been revealed (thank goodness), was so drunk that she could barely walk, and that’s a big deal. Why? … Read More

This photo from the night of the alleged Steubenville rape went viral. | Source: Anonymous

The now-infamous Steubenville, Ohio rape case is in its first days of trial this week, and the moredetailsemerge, the scarier it all gets.

Witnesses in the case are explaining that the victim, whose name hasn’t been revealed (thank goodness), was so drunk that she could barely walk, and that’s a big deal. Why? Because if she was that drunk, she also couldn’t legally give consent, which is really important in getting the alleged rapists convicted.

There’s been an ongoing debate in the Steubenville case as to whether or not the victim was conscious when the incident (or incidents, depending on how you look at it) occurred, and witnesses have various stories as to whether or not she was actually passed out throughout the night. But they all agree: she was in really, really bad shape. One witness said she’d never seen the victim that drunk ever before. Another witness said that the next day, the victim was crying and saying she didn’t remember anything that happened. (If you remember, the rape case came about after the accusers’ friends, who are apparently just as much dumb scumbags as they are, released pictures and tweets of the incident.)

What’s disturbing is that local police in Steubenville took 16 days–that’s over two weeks, girls–to take the victim’s clothes in for analysis in their lab. As a result, some crucial DNA evidence for the case may have been lost, and a lot of fingers are being pointed at Steubenville as a town and their strong football culture, with people insinuating that the cops may have deliberately stalled as a means to protect the Steubenville High School football players who are accused of the assault.

It’s super important to remember that regardless of reports, these guys are innocent until proven guilty. But if this girl was as wasted as it appears, then she legally was unable to give consent, which doesn’t look promising for the accused, Trent Mays and Ma’Lik Richmond.

It’s also really important to remember–and I mentioned this yesterday–that regardless of what happens, rape is not the victim’s fault. Obviously, there are situations that are safer than others, and ideally, underage and binge drinking wouldn’t happen, because they make everything murky, scary and more dangerous. But two wrongs don’t make a right: It’d be dumb for me to leave me car unlocked with a bag of money in the backseat, but it’d still be wrong for someone to steal it. Someone being inebriated doesn’t give anyone else the right to violate you, to do the wrong thing or to break the law. That’s why rape is illegal–not being a rape victim.

Do you think the Steubenville rape case was indeed rape? Do you think the victim of the Steubenville rape case had it coming? Do you think it’s ever a victim’s fault for rape? What do you think the outcome of the Steubenville rape trial will be? Tell us in the comments!

]]>http://www.gurl.com/2013/03/14/steubenville-ohio-rape-case/feed/2Are Teens More Likely To Drink If Their BFFs Do?http://www.gurl.com/2013/01/30/teenage-drinking-study/
http://www.gurl.com/2013/01/30/teenage-drinking-study/#respondWed, 30 Jan 2013 19:36:28 +0000http://www.gurl.com/?p=96597In today’s most obvious studies, new research says that teens are more likely to drink alcohol if their best friends do too. Um, duh. Am I the only one who came to this completely obvious conclusion without the help of a carefully conducted study? Researchers looked at over 800 teens and found that more teens … Read More

In today’s most obvious studies, new research says that teens are more likely to drink alcohol if their best friends do too. Um, duh. Am I the only one who came to this completely obvious conclusion without the help of a carefully conducted study?

Researchers looked at over 800 teens and found that more teens had their first alcoholic drink because their friends were doing it and not because of any alcoholic family members. And they’re not talking peer pressure here – it’s more about having access to alcohol because your friends do. So basically, or at least when it comes to drinking, your friends have more of an influence on you than your family does.

This makes a lot of sense to me. One, I’ve seen it happen a bazillion times. Two, that’s pretty much exactly what happened to me. Story time!

When I entered my freshman year of high school, I had zero interest in drinking. Alcohol freaked me out and getting drunk freaked me out even more (there was this traumatizing moment a few years back when I was on vacation and saw a naked, drunk man dancing on the beach for a huge crowd… let’s not talk about it). To me, getting wasted meant doing something stupid that would cause me to embarrass myself, throwing up (I have a phobia) and being homeless (that’s what my grandma told me).

However, I was apparently the only freshman who thought this way. No, that’s an exaggeration. My number one crush was straight-edge and a few other kids in my class stayed away from booze. But my group of besties, most of whom were older than me, drank… a lot. It made me a little nervous, but mostly I was fine with it. I was always the sober one laughing at their ridiculous antics and patting myself on the back for being so angelic.

But towards the end of freshman year, I started getting really curious about drinking. I was scared, but I also sort of wanted to try it. After all, all of my friends were doing it and they were fine – so it couldn’t be too bad, right? When my friends exchanged silly drunken stories, I felt left out. I was the only sober one and I was sick of it.

So, to the disappointment of my middle school besties and my crush, I started drinking. My high school BFF, V, couldn’t have been happier. I was obviously an extremely cautious drinker, never mixing different kinds of alcohol, refusing to chug or take shots and rarely having more than two drinks. V was an “experienced” drinker and could gulp down shots just as quickly as the senior boys.

She started a “game” where she forced me to drink every time she drank. At first, I played along like it was a joke… but it quickly started to get annoying. One night, I just wasn’t in the mood. When I told her I didn’t feel like it, she pushed my drink to my lips and said, “Drink, J, drink!” I snapped back, “No! Just stop, okay?” It was the last time we played the game.

Would I have started drinking if all of my friends around me weren’t doing it? Honestly, probably not. I had never had an interest in it until alcohol became readily available to me through my friends. When I started dating my first BF, that straight-edge crush, I stopped drinking entirely. And when we broke up, and I started spending time with a group of glorified alcoholics from my job (harsh but true), I started drinking again. And now that I’m with my current BF, who’s not really into that stuff? You guessed it – I’m not a big drinker anymore.

So yeah, I think your friends definitely have a huge influence on whether you’re going to drink or not – at least for me. It’s easy to get sucked into a routine that all of your besties have, even if you never had any intention of doing so. I don’t think that makes you a weak person… I think it’s sort of normal. And as obvious as this study might be, I still think it’s pretty interesting.

One thing to keep in mind? Always do what makes you happy… don’t just do what your friends are doing because it’s there and it’s happening. Trust me.

Have you ever done something just because all of your friends were doing it? Would you start drinking to fit in with your friends? Have you ever done that? Do you agree with this study? Tell us in the comments.