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Monday, March 28, 2011

Q: A guy I had a huge crush on in high school took me out once our senior year. We didn't have sex (though we came close) and he never called or really talked to me again. I always thought it was because I didn't let him "go all the way," but maybe it was because I was kind of chubby and wore glasses and stuff. I saw him a few weeks ago and I'm quite different looking. He didn't remember my name—or that we dated that one time—but he sure is interested now. What should I do?

Anne: Well, that stinks, but really, high school is over and done with. It all depends on how you feel now, as an adult. If you met up with him and find you want to go out, do it. I would say though, that if you have any kind of idea of revenge for the wrong he did you in high school, forget it. If he's still the same jerk he was back then, just don't go out with him again.

Dee: What can we say? Guys are jerks often enough when they're grown up. In high school there's no hope at all. They're totally hormone driven, with fucking on the mind morning, noon and night. If you didn't give it up, he might well have been stupid enough to forget about you. If he pulls the same shit now, blow him off—and I don't mean in the fun way you both will enjoy. Good luck.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Q: I have a zillion dresses and skirts and slacks and gads of other stuff in my closet. I know it's too much but I can't seem to get rid of any of it. And I keep buying. What can I do?

Anne: Ask your doctor for a referral to a psychologist. You need help to control your spending and hoarding habit.

Dee: Your problem is obvious, and so is the solution. You buy clothes as a replacement for sex. Buying slacks to cover your legs is easier to you than finding a man to fit between your legs. You hold onto the clothes because they represent being fucked—which is what you really want. You buy a dress; you wish you had a man with a stiff dick. You buy a new purse; you wish you were being banged against the bedroom wall. You open your closet and see dresses by the dozens; you wish each one was really a memory of a mind-shifting orgasm brought on by a lover's tongue.

Forget buying a new tee shirt. Go buy a box of extra large Trojans and find someone who fits them. After you've been laid, you won't feel the need to buy anything—except maybe sexy lingerie and fuck me heels.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Q: Joe and I have been dating for three years. We're close to 30 and both getting our professions started, so I haven't been too worried that he hasn't asked me to marry him. We talk around it more than about it, but we both agree that we are soul mates. The thing I am concerned about though is that he can't seem to stop looking at other women. Waitresses who take our order at the diner, the receptionist at his office, women walking down the street, even women in the next cars at stop lights. He just laughs it off when I tell him how much it bothers me. He says jealousy is the sign of a small mind. Like I said, we're soul mates and I'm sure he loves me, but this does bother me. I just don't know if I should pay attention to him and try to put it out of mind or really confront him and risk humiliation or his anger.

Anne: If it bothers you this much it should bother him. To brush you off with a wave of his hand and some glib comment shows a lack of caring on his part. If he's truly your soul mate, he will take whatever disturbs you seriously. Confront him.

Dee: Start commenting on guys—do you do this already? You know that old "fair for the goose, fair for the gander stuff"? Well, it's true. If he notices women, then you should notice men. Comment frequently on their cute butts and the packages hidden in their jeans. Ogle a cute waiter and be sure to mention his attributes to your boyfriend. Be sincere. If he doesn't show the shred of small-minded jealousy—not the tiniest shred—I'd say your soul mate thinks of you as a friend with soulful benefits, not a wife.

Monday, March 7, 2011

Q: I know my little sister is having sex. She's only 15. From the perspective of five years, I know what she's doing can ruin her life. She knows that I started having sex early, so what can I say or do now to steer her away from what she's doing?

Anne: Try explaining to her that now you regret your activities when you were a teen and tell her why. It's hard because in this day being pregnant as a teen doesn't carry the stigma it did in my youth, but even without the shame of being an unwed mother, having a child can completely change your life. The bigger worry to me is the chance of contracting aids, though, or some STD. Take her to a public health clinic and talk to a nurse who knows the stats regarding the age where aids presents itself—that will show that it's most often contracted in the younger years.

Dee: You are the voice of experience. Define to yourself why you wish you hadn't screwed around as a teen and then explain that to her. Don't preach. Be straightforward in why you think having sex early is bad—give firm, actual examples. Don't preach. Tell her that no matter how responsible she thinks she's being, no one at her age is really responsible—they give into emotion and pressure. One moment can change everything for her. Talk about what she wants in her future and how random sex can affect that. But don't preach.

About Us

Dee and Anne are two sides of the same romance author. Dee is sweaty-sheet, romp-in-the-hay sex. Anne blushes at such stuff. We both write emotional, often fun, always loving romance you can get lost in, though.
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