Barn cats for hire

Poor Ratty had gone to his reward. He was a fine specimen of his species who looked like he’d enjoyed a long and prosperous life. Then he met up with my feral friends Mango, Muffin, Cupcake, Cinnamon and Mao  an outdoor security team so effective that very little gets under the radar.

Adios, Ratty. Hope you rest in peace. And thanks to you, feral cats, for not allowing an unwanted tenant in my house.

There is much to be said for feral fuzz patrolling the property. A nice colony of outdoor cats can keep bugs and other undesirables at bay. And should a realative of Ratty drop by, outdoor kitties show their mettle. The felines that Jenny Burgess of the San Antonio Feral Cat Coalition calls “barn cats” aren’t just brave, they’re true professionals.

Jenny’s group has dozens of barn cats for hire. They’re a little too wild to be adopted as pets but all are in need of good homes where they can pursue their careers as security guards. Actually, the term “barn cat” is a bit of a misnomer because no barn is necessary to get the job done. A cat accustomed to living outdoors can happily reside almost anywhere provided the “anywhere” includes a safe spot such as a covered patio or porch for protection when the weather turns bad. Daily dishes of kitty kibble also are necessary to keep the felines in top physical shape.

To put it simply, barn cats will work for food and shelter. And for this modest salary, you can expect home security on a par in its own way with Brink’s.

Likely, barn cats will avoid coming inside. Instead, they’ll patrol the yard’s peremiters. They also might be a bit skittish and wary around humans since most were rescued after the critical kitten-socialization period. But don’t be surprised if an outdoor animal suddenly decides to cross the threshold and snooze in your lap in between safety patrols. This kind of kitty needs love as well as a career. And though some contend that feral cats are too wild to settle down, I know from personal experience that it can happen.

Gatito, Tony, Missy and Snowball all started out as feisty ferals. Patience and kindness won them over. The first three have been delightful companions and strictly indoor pets for some 11 years now. Little Snowball, the kit who lives on the screen porch, also is turning into an affectionate sweetheart. Mango, Muffin, Cupcake, Cinnamon and Mao watch Snowball getting petted and pampered, and lately they’re acting very interested. Then they scamper off to work, apprehending bugs.

Sometimes a big, ugly bug will escape their detection and get inside. Gatito and his pals take over  the second line of defense. Mercifully, it’s over quickly. Big Ugly Bug is dispatched to the Great Beyond where he undoubtedly will meet up with Ratty and they’ll conclude that fooling around with felines is like writing your own death warrant.

In closing, let me say that I heartily recommend pussycat security. Works for me. I think it will work for you. To install your own system, e-mail the San Antonio Feral Cat Coalition, info@sanantonioferalcats.org., leave a message on the group’s help line (210) 877-9067 or send a barn-cat adoption request to the San Antonio Feral Cat Coalition, P.O.Box 692308, San Antonio, TX 78269-2308. Sugar and Spice, the kitties shown here, recently were relocated and started new jobs in the country. But they’re typical of the many highly competent professionals available.