A very strange girl was blown by a tornado to the wondrous land of Oz....
but the REALLY strange thing is that she's still in Kansas!

Monday, January 7, 2013

24 hours and counting....

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Well....first the bad news.

Kitty left us. We fixed her up all "brand new" and thought we had a nice, well-behaved, and sociable cat. And then...Blaine went out to the BBQ a few days ago to grill some drumsticks. (He makes the most absolute bestest drumsticks.) Kitty followed him out onto the back deck. Blaine didn't think anything about it since occasionally one of our cats will follow him out. But then he shoo's them back inside since our cats are "indoor cats".

After Kitty followed him out onto the deck, she then ambled away---and when Blaine turned around, she was gone. He followed her footsteps in the snow until they reached the street. Then he couldn't find them again. He checked all the yards of the other houses on our two cul-de-sacs but couldn't find them. But all their driveways were in various states of snow coverage, some with ice only, and there were other, larger footprints.

And she has never come back. We don't know what happened to her. Maybe she went home to her real owner? Blaine thinks so. He had been nagging me about the fact that she was fat and healthy when I found her---not skin and bones like a real stray cat would be. He said that he always believed that she had an actual owner who kept her as an outdoor cat.

And now.....

I have less than 24 hours until time for surgery at the Shawnee Mission Medical Center complex.

I will check into the center's surgery center to have the surgery done.

In case I didn't explain very well before, here's what is going on.

I had a breast augmentation done years and years ago. I completely forgot all about it, to tell you the truth. Until about a year ago when scar tissue began forming around the "capsules" the breast implants were in, inside my breasts. The scar tissue didn't bother me but my OB/GYN and breast surgeon followed me for a year, doing multiple mammograms and doppler studies. We followed this pattern for a year---and, unfortunately, the scar tissue kept getting bigger and bigger. I could no longer ignore it. Because it began to hurt me, hurting more and more. And my breasts were turning hard.

So my breast surgeon referred me to a plastic surgeon since my insurance wouldn't pay for the scar tissue to be removed since it was "of cosmetic origin". So we have to pay nearly $10,000 of our own money to a plastic surgeon to fix the whole mess.

And when I got to the plastic surgeon, it was decided that I needed a breast revision surgery, where they take out the old implants and capsules, and scrape out the scar tissue of course. And then new implants are put in (under the muscle layer-OUCH!) to reconstruct the breasts. But the doctor also said he wanted to do a second procedure called a "breast lift", a "mastopexy"---the explanation of it here. He said this would tighten up the skin on the breasts and reposition the nipples to the new upright-ness of the newly augmented breasts. He tried to comfort me by saying that I would have breasts like a 20-year old.

Sigh...

So I have to have two procedures in one. And I don't know how the breast implants I chose will look. They are "Natrelle Gel Implants" that come with some level of warranty if they ever rupture or something similar. As for size, it's hard to guess what implant to go with when you're trying the fake ones on over your existing boobs. I mean, how would one know what level of "sticking out" you will be when you can't simulate how it would be when they remove the old implants and then put in the new ones? So I have no idea what I'll look like with the ones I chose.

Hell, I hope I don't come out of there looking like Dolly Parton--- or else Dog The Bounty Hunter's beautiful wife, Beth. (I think Beth is totally cool but she has the biggest boobs I've ever seen!)

Who knows. I am confused as hell about this whole procedure anyway. But one thing I do know for sure---and they told me such---is that I'm going to be sick as a dog and in great pain after the two procedures.

I will have to be on mandatory bed rest for so many days, and I won't be allowed to lift anything heavier than a cotton ball. I won't be able to lift my arms over my shoulders. I won't even be able to brush my hair. And there has to be somebody to care for me that day and then bring me to the plastic surgeon's office the next day for the post-op visit.

Blaine is going to take those two days off and will care for me. And for Thursday and Friday, when he returns to work, he will leave food for me in the refrigerator.

So I've been taping all my favorite TV shows on the DVR so that I'll have plenty to watch while I'm camped out on the living room couch. That way I won't be at the mercy of the crappy daytime television.

I think the meds I have to take after the surgery might make me sick. I'll be in great pain and so they gave me a prescription for a zillion oxycontins. I've taken them before and they make me really nauseated. But they gave me a prescription for Phenergan, an anti-nausea med. And I also have to take 5mg of Valium around the clock as a muscle relaxer. And an anti-biotic of course. Hopefully I'll be high as a kite and not care about the pain....

I'm very frightened today. And I miss Kitty. In fact, I'm so out of sorts that I made an appointment at my beauty spa. I'm going to get my golden blonde hair tinted down to more of an ash blonde, which I've always preferred. I'm also going to get a deep, botanical conditioning on my hair and a trim. That should keep my mind occupied for a few hours. And they pamper you up there---they always give me some refreshing cucumber water to drink. And since I won't be able to lift a brush to my head for days, my hair will be decent at least.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Being a nurse, I know you will follow the doctors orders exactly (yeah, right LOL) I hope Blaine is a good nurse! Sorry to hear about Miss Kitty but she just may show back up when you least expect it since she knows a good thing when she found it...

Thank you, Sandy! I'm trying to follow the doc' advice but I get paranoid when I have so something exrutiatingly painful, like get up off the couch, pick up the remote off the foor or hold a cup of coffee...aaargh. And thank you for your prayers--I need all the ones I can get!

Sorry to hear about the pain but as the saying goes, "This too will pass". I hope it passes quickly. So nice to know you are on the mend. Take care of yourself and have your "nurse" take good care of you.

I am recuperating but it is very slow and very painful. I'll blog about it in a day or two when I'm "allowed". (Most things the doctor hasn't allowed yet---especially sitting at the computer for lengthy bits of time...) (But I'm sneaking a bit here...)

What happened was that the doctor had no earthly idea what had occurred in the left breast. He said he hadn't ever seen such a problem himself. I'll tell it when I blog about it soon. (It's kind of yukky bizarre....)