Walking, you see a pair of lean, wheat-colored, twin dogs laying on the warm, charcoal colored stones of the sidewalk. The female, you have guessed, has draped her long neck over her sleeping brother. They do not need to wear leashes as they are so calm and elegant. You wonder if they are trained to use the toilet.

Can dogs be twins? If there are eight in the litter are they octuplets? You’re not certain of the science but you are sure these dogs are twins. It is impossible to assign, to either the brother or the sister, the various folds on their conjoined mass.

Their short golden hair is shimmering in the sunlight and you want badly to take a photo of them for your Instagram. You tear my eyes away from the twins to assess their owners' intimidation level. If low, you will stop and take their photo. Before you can make a judgement you get confused. The couple, in their forties, is sitting at a small outdoor table above their dogs, both facing the street and holding hands.

The man is making a face that communicates he is suffering from an itch just on the inside of his nose. He decides to use the hand that is holding his partner’s for this task. He raises the oversized mass of matched fleshes to his face and succeeds in expelling the itch. The woman is grossed out but when she feels you looking, she smiles at him. He has just done something cute, actually.

Distracted, you continue on your path without stopping to take a photo.

You wonder what in nature required them to be that golden color? Are they Afrocanines? Did they need to blend in among the savanna? In North America, among the wheat fields? Hunting at sunset, sparkling like the hills they were no match for the stupefied ground hog. Their first masters whistling so they knew which direction to bring their kill.

Whistling in the wheat field is the way Tony Soprano describes going down on a woman to his wife Carmella. They are giggling at his Uncle Junior’s new reputation as a finook and less of a man, because of his whistling, which his girlfriend has been bragging about to her friends.

You don’t know if dogs can be twins or perform cunnilingus but you wouldn’t be surprised if both turned out to be true. Because dogs are content with the uncivilized ways they use their noses.

Man stands, exposes his genitals, vision evolves to be the more dominant sense and thus he tames the natural world. Eating a girl out means he’s smelling with his nose and unable to see with his eyes (glasses off, please!). Like a ruin jammed between two hotels, it is an uncomfortable reminder of an uncivilized past.