Nutella thieves on the run – caught sticky-handed?

How in the name of chocolatey goodness does one steal tonnes and tonnes of chocolate spread? Firstly, how do you succeed unnoticed? How do you go about transporting it all? But the real pressing question here is, what on earth would compel anyone to do it?

Well, as AP reports, an unknown number of culprits in ‘ran off’ with 5.5 tonnes of Nutella chocolate-hazelnut spread in the town of Bad Hersfeld, Germany over the weekend. If they’re ever caught and tried in court, Kipp can only strongly recommend (and hope) the judge pose the same questions to them. Although, as the German news agency dpa reports, the same gang has previously stolen ‘a load’ of energy drinks from the same location. Maybe there’s a bigger scheme behind it.

Seriously though, this news begs an endless number of questions. The first being: are they insane? Obviously, Kipp doesn’t condone theft (stay in school kids) but if you – for some unknown reason – absolutely had to, wouldn’t you be better off with something a little less heavy on the hips? We kid, of course.

The funny bit of this story is that Nutella’s chocolate spread doesn’t really have a steady resale value as one might think. It turns out that even if they were somehow able to sell it to someone living under a rock, they’d only get about $21,000 for the whole sticky lot. Worth it?