I take solace in the fact that the course of history was never changed by the many but by the few who risked exposing facts by written word reminds me always that the Pen Is Mightier than the Sword. When the self righteous is poked into undying rage the real personality explodes like dynamite and the self proclaimed veneer vanishes into thin air like the mist from dawn. Let the chips fall where they may.

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“The idea that sex is something a woman gives a man, and she loses something when she does that, which again for me is nonsense. I want us to raise girls differently where boys and girls start to see sexuality as something that they own, rather than something that a boy takes from a girl.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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Saturday, September 6, 2014

Jamaican Women Know your Vagina

#THE VAGINA DIARIES

#20 Important Things Every Woman Should Know About Her Vagina

1.While men do pee out of the penis, women do not pee out of the vagina. Know your anatomy. There are three holes and countless other sexy structures. Find your way around on the Pretty Pink Punani Tour. Get a hand mirror and go to town.

2.The punani or the more correct Vagina, doesn’t connect to your lung. If you lose something in there, don’t worry. Reach in all the way and pull it out. Do not- I repeat- do not, go hunting for whatever you’ve lost with a pair of plyers. If you think you put something in there and you can’t find it, chances are good that it’s simply not there. Think of your vagina as being like a sock. If you lose a banana in a sock…it stays in the sock.

3. Yes, it’s true- your vagina can fall out. Not to belabor the sock metaphor, but it can turn inside out just like a worn out sweat sock and hang between your legs as you get older. But don’t fret- this condition- called pelvic prolapse- can be fixed.

4. There’s no such thing as being #revirginized. Once you lose it, it’s gone. Just so you know.

5. You can catch sexually transmitted diseases even if you use a condom. Sorry to break it to you, but skin of the vulva can still touch infectious skin of the scrotum- and BAM! Warts. Herpes. Molluscum contagiosum. So pick your partners carefully.

6. The vagina is like a bicep. Use it or lose it. If you don’t have a partner, pick up a battery-operated boyfriend to help keep things healthy as you age. But don’t worry- it’s usually not an issue until after menopause, when fragile vaginal tissue can scar and shrink. If properly tended, your vagina will be able to pleasure you until the day you leave this life.

7. Every vulva is different and special. Some lips hang down. Some are tucked up neatly inside. All are beautiful. Don’t even think about labiaplasty or “vaginal rejuvenation surgery.” You’re perfect just the way you are.

8. Most women don’t have orgasms from intercourse alone. The clitoris is where the action is. Most women who do orgasm during sex have figured out how to hit with sweet spot, either from positioning or from directly stimulation of the clitoris with fingers.

9. If you’re hunting for your G Spot, be patient. Stimulating this area usually requires more time and deeper stimulation than most people think. Try using a finger in a “come hither” motion to stimulate the front wall of the vagina, where the G spot lives. If you can’t find it, don’t worry. You’re not alone. Many can’t- and it’s definitely not critical to having a a fulfilling romp in the hay.

10. Pleasurable sex is your birthright, and painful sex is NOT normal. 20 million women suffer from painful sex and most never seek help. (If you’re one of these women, get help here.)

11. The vagina doesn’t need to be douched. As Eve Ensler says, ““My vagina doesn’t need to be cleaned up. It smells good already. Don’t try to decorate. Don’t believe him when he tells you it smells like rose petals when it’s supposed to smell like pussy. That’s what they’re doing – trying to clean it up, make it smell like bathroom spray or a garden. All those douche sprays – floral, berry, rain. I don’t want my pussy to smell like rain. All cleaned up like washing a fish after you cook it. I want to taste the fish. That’s why I ordered it.”

12. The only cancer a Pap smear screens for is cervical cancer. It doesn’t check your ovaries, your uterus, or your colon.

13. How much vaginal discharge you make varies widely. Some normal, healthy women spew loads of discharge and need to wear panty liners every day. Others are bone dry. As long as you are not at risk of STD’s and you have no itching, burning, or odor, you’re probably just fine. If in doubt, see your gynecologist.

14. Menstrual blood is supposed to clot, so don’t freak out. Usually, what you think are clots are just pieces of uterine lining. As long as you’re not losing too much blood, small clots during your period need not concern you. Clots are just nature’s way of keeping you from bleeding too much. Blood is supposed to clot. It’s when the clots are large or you start to hemorrhage that we start to worry.

15. Lots of vaginas need help lubing up during sex, especially as you get older. Don’t be afraid to slick on some lubricant like K-Y Jelly or Astroglide (coconut oil is a great natural lubricant, but don’t blame me if you find yourself hankering for a post-coital macaroon).

16. Vaginal farts (some call them “queefs” or “varts”) happen to almost all women at one time or another, especially during sex or other forms of exercise. Don’t be embarrassed. You’re perfectly normal.

17. Vaginas stretch out when you have babies vaginally. It’s natural but it can leave you feeling a bit loosey goosey. Kegel exercises (contracting the muscles of the vagina) really do help. To do them, practice stopping the stream of urine when you pee. There- that’s the muscle! Now contract and relax it 10 X for three or more sets several times per day.

18. Some women do ejaculate during orgasm, but you’re normal if you don’t. The controversial “female ejaculation” most likely represents 2 different phenomena. If it’s a small amount of milky fluid, it likely comes from the paraurethral glands inside the urethra. If it’s a cup, it’s probably pee. Many times, it may be a little bit of both. But don’t stress out about peeing on yourself. Put a towel under you and surrender to the experience.

19. Sex shouldn’t hurt, but it does for many women. If you’re one of those women, see your doctor. So many women are too embarrassed to say anything, so they suffer in silence. There are things you can do to help.

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About Me

I have threaded many valleys, stomped many plains and yet i have failed to become what i envisioned myself at five years old. i have discovered that my capacity to achieve is not significantly determined by the genectic cards that were dealt to me by my creator or the chromosomal integrations of my progeny. it is a consequence of comprehending and discovering my purpose in life, to organize, programme and direct my inner software into the succesful monstrosity that i often envison myself becoming. i will not allow myself to be bamboozled by the socalled naysayers in my life or the critics that lurk at the gate of success, or the detractors that prowl the gates of opportunity and the dark fiend that skulk the inner morst recesses of my mind. i am the mitochondria of success.The beast that will topple low self esteem and i am the force that will reckon failure and disappointment. my state of mind determines my wealth. therefore i am as rich as i think i am. i am prosperity conscious since it takes the same amount of effort to accept poverty and aimlessness as it takes to embrace purpose and prosperity.

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I am finding my Voice!

" The real journey of a writer – or any creative – isn’t to publication, rewards, acclaim, but to their own voice.

When you find your voice, you connect to yourself, and then through yourself to the world. Your work resonates. As Thoreau once wrote in his journal, “The whole is in each man.” (And each woman.)

I’ve always felt that your voice is twofold: not just how you write, but what you write about. They inform and shape each other.

You need to read, look, listen, absorb. You need to take the world into you so you can reinvent it through your own point of view.

You need to tune out external voices that speak in the language of the shoulds – you should do this, you should do that – and move into the secret life of your intuition. This other life has its own mind. It will guide you to places that, because they are yours, remain – as yet — unknown and uncharted. For all the self-help and how-to that fills our culture, success is, in the end, as unique to you as a fingerprint. You can only make that path by walking it. It unfolds in front of you. Sometimes it carries you along.

So you need to write.

And write.

And write.

You need to write past the point of self-consciousness. You need to quit trying to write: to be clever, witty, pretty, poetic. (Perhaps your true voice is none of these things.) You need to fall through the words into something else entirely.

(Blogging can be exceptionally good for this.)

We start by imitating the styles of others. That kind of mimicry – conscious or not – is like a trapdoor opening beneath you.

It drops you into yourself.

It’s when you lose yourself that your true voice slowly and steadily comes out of the dark. It might be raw and stark and naked. Or howling and slightly mad. Your soul is stamped all the way through it.

Your words on the page and your soul on the line.

Finding your voice – what to say, how to say it, how to speak up in the world – is about making your soul manifest. When you’re moving in the grooves of that soulprint, you know it. And so do others.