NyaChan:
We were staying at my uncle's house over the Christmas weekend and after feeling a bit awkward about the arrangements, I wanted to see how ehellions would handle it. Here's the set up:

1) Uncle & Aunt's room; my Aunt is out of town2) My Grandma's room (she lives with them full-time) & has room for 1 more person3) "Little" Cousin's room; a double bed & he is 22 years old4) My Female Cousin's pre-marriage room; has room for 2 people; she is my age as is her husband5) My Female Cousin's post-marriage room in the basement; she and her husband have their own place though, my aunt just thought it would give them more privacy during their frequent visits; has room for 2 people

On this occasion, my parents, me, Uncle, Grandma, Little Cousin, Female Cousin, & her husband are all in the house at once. Female Cousin & her husband showed up unexpectedly in the evening and my parents had already put their bags in Female Cousin's post-marriage room. I used to bunk with Female Cousin before her marriage and put my bags in her old room. My Uncle is very casual and does not assign rooms, he just vaguely expects that everyone will find something comfortable. I wasn't sure what to do.

Due to cultural expectations, Female Cousin would never consider taking the room my parents had intended to sleep in. I offered to go sleep with my Grandma though I knew it would be a miserable night, because I knew if I said I'd sleep on a couch as I'd have preferred they'd instinctively say no. They have a natural distaste for my Grandma's company though (loooong story) and instinctively said no to that anyways. I knew if I didn't give up my room, either they or my Little Cousin would end up on a couch and was feeling bad about it. My Uncle also offered to have Little Cousin sleep in his room for the night. Female Cousin's husband commented jokingly that the number of rooms wouldn't matter as Female Cousin would fall asleep on the couch anyways. This was all said at random points in the night in passing so no definite plan was ever reached.

Then my cousins + husband and I stayed up to watch a movie in the family room while the parents & grandparent went to their respective rooms. Little Cousin went down to sleep on the couch in the basement in the beginning (where it turned out my mom was sleeping on the chaise opposite rather than the bedroom) & my cousin and her husband fell asleep mid movie - I didn't realize it until I realized I was talking into empty space. Cousin looked pretty comfy on the nice couch, but her husband was asleep in a recliner. I quietly shut everything down and went upstairs without disturbing them.

After sleeping in a bed for the night while my cousins were all on furniture around the house, I felt a bit guilty that we'd taken up the extra bedrooms and I'm wondering if I should have done more than just offer to move where the onus would still be on them to accept my offer rather than actually moving my bag to my grandma's or to a couch in the basement. I also feel silly and guilty (recliner sleeping can't be too comfortable can it?) for not waking them up so that they could move to a more comfortable location (it finally occurred to me while typing this that Little Cousin's room was empty and they or I could have slept there). What do you guys think? What would have been the best solution, and what should I have done?

Hmmmmm:
As soon as female cousin arrived I would have moved my things to the basement where your parents were staying to stay on the sofa. Then no matter where they fell asleep, they'd have the option of moving to a bed.

gramma dishes:

--- Quote from: NyaChan on December 27, 2012, 03:21:50 PM ---... my cousin and her husband fell asleep mid movie - I didn't realize it until I realized I was talking into empty space. Cousin looked pretty comfy on the nice couch, but her husband was asleep in a recliner. I quietly shut everything down and went upstairs without disturbing them.

... I also feel silly and guilty (recliner sleeping can't be too comfortable can it?) for not waking them up so that they could move to a more comfortable location ...

--- End quote ---

I think this is a classic example of "You snooze, you lose!" ;D

Stop feeling guilty. They all survived.

MrTango:
Did anyone complain?

It sounds as if you were the last person to go to sleep, and if anyone who went to sleep before you had wanted to, they could have claimed a bed.