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My Girlfriend Went On A Cruise And Came Back 16 Pounds Heavier!

February 27th, 2018, 11:48 AM

My girlfriend (Laura) just finished graduate school, so to celebrate her and some of her girlfriends went on a two week cruise (Royal Caribbean). I am so proud of her for finishing school. I dropped her off at the ship port and we said our goodbyes. Over the course of the trip, I would text her to check in. Nothing crazy. About three days before they were supposed to get back, her friend carol who was also on the trip texted me saying, "Wait until you see Laura LOL." I wasn't really sure what this meant so I replied something like, "Yea, can't wait!"

They got back into town, (They left from Maryland), and I was waiting for her at the port. She texts me and says she's waiting by the car loop. As I pulled up I finally got what carol had meant. Laura was standing there, wearing the same comfortable travel clothes she had left in. Except now she couldn't get her tank top to fully cover her belly, and her shorts were unbuttoned. I would later find out from Carol that she had gained 16 lbs over the course of the trip.

On the way home, all she could talk about was the food. What kind of food, how much food. When and where they would eat. I would ask about what kind of activities they did, and somehow she would bring it back to the food. All the while not once mentioning her extra padding. She had never been on an all inclusive trip, so she had said she was shocked how easy it was to get food.

That night, we went out to dinner with my parents to celebrate her graduation. We went to this nice Italian place by us. Laura, now with extra pounds on her figure but no new clothes, wore a tight black v-neck and white capris. I actually thought it was a cute outfit, even with her belly peeking out from the bottom of the shirt and poking out over the waist of her pants. Honestly, I didn't really care all that much. I was just glad she had a good time.

That is until we walked into the restaurant, and the first thing my father says is, "Jesus, did you eat the whole cruise ship?"

I am not quick on my feet, so all I could say was, "She had a good time!" with an awkward chuckle. That is really how I felt. I looked at her though and she was tugging her shirt down over her exposed midriff, clearly embarrassed... During dinner my dad said another remark along the lines of, "You know this restaurant isn't all inclusive right? Haha," while Laura was eating. I looked over towards the end of dinner, and she had her pants unbuttoned and unzipped.

So I spoke briefly with Carol today, and she was basically like, "Hey, ya see what I meant? We all overindulged but she was something else..." She said that the group would all usually be heading to bed at about 11:00-12:00 and Laura would be walking out the door to head to the midnight buffet that the ship hosted every night, only to return drunk and stuffed. Do you guys think that I should address her weight gain, or see how the next few days go?

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They were on the cruise for 16 days. I know it's hard to believe right? But based on what her friend told me, I'm not shocked. Apparently all she did for all 16 days was sit by the pool with a plate of food in one hand and a sugary alcoholic drink in the other.

It's funny you suggest getting new clothes. My mom asked me if I wanted her to take her clothes shopping saying, "It seems like all of her clothes are a little too snug now. All of her t-shirts look more like crop tops these days..."

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You seem incredibly superficial and only someone who's that insecure about himself would create an online profile to bash his girlfriend's body or try to look for sympathy on a public forum while posting photos of his girlfriend for the world to see. You, sir, take the cake when it comes to POS.

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You seem incredibly superficial and only someone who's that insecure about himself would create an online profile to bash his girlfriend's body or try to look for sympathy on a public forum while posting photos of his girlfriend for the world to see. You, sir, take the cake when it comes to POS.

BOOM !

It's a first for me to agree with you, Rose, but you're spot on !

The definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result.

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I don't think he's a POS. I think he's just concerned about his G/F's weight gain and hopefully, she nips her new found food addiction in the bud before she's three or four sizes bigger and wonders why her boyfriend isn't as attentive in the bedroom. Its one thing to grow fat together, it's quite another when one is blowin up real good while the other is keeping a healthy body mass.

You sure she's not pregnant, Op?

Also: Can I ask what your point is in posting this on a relationship forum instead of talking to your girlfriend about it? Are you looking for some sensitive ways to tell her you'd like her to get back to her pre-cruise weight or are you just here to vent?

"First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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I don't think it's the same girl in those pictures. Different phone. Or if it IS the same girl, the change took longer than 16 days. It would be impossible, in my opinion, to go from the skinny little girl in photo one to the thick-armed, pot-bellied girl in the second photo. Not in 16 days. This doesn't pass the smell test.

"What lips my lips have kissed and where and why I have forgotten." ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

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Phasesofthemoon -
Yea im sure shes not pregnant haha. But thank you for hearing me out. I am in no way trying to shame her. Im just looking for advice on how to approach this. Should i be concerned about her health, talk to her about it, etc...

honestly i find her more attractive now. I think the new gut is kinda cute

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Phasesofthemoon -
Yea im sure shes not pregnant haha. But thank you for hearing me out. I am in no way trying to shame her. Im just looking for advice on how to approach this. Should i be concerned about her health, talk to her about it, etc...

honestly i find her more attractive now. I think the new gut is kinda cute

Yes, its cute now... weight er, I mean wait until she's three sizes bigger. You won't find it so cute then, I'm sure. Just start doing activities with her that entail NOT sitting on the couch and when you are eating out, order without carbs and share her fries so that she's not getting a whole plateful in her. If she unbuttons her pants again that would be a good time to talk to her and ask her why she keeps doing that.. let her talk herself into losing the weight.

It quite easy to put on 20 or 30 lbs it's quite hard to lose it.

"First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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honestly though, like if it makes her happy, and wants to overindulge, ill support her 100%. And if need be, ill go shopping with her so she doesnt need to keep popping the button everytime she eats haha

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It still comes down to the fact that he IS superficial with his 'concern' over her weight gain (body image) instead of her weight gain due to an underlying issue.
It sounds like the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, based on the ignorant comment his dad said, but the OP only has the balls to think it.

ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH THIS GIRL OR NOT ?

Perhaps she's an emotional eater ? Perhaps the stress of exams and graduating was so too much for her and she was starving herself prior to going away ?
Perhaps she thought to herself, "Fuck it, for once in my life, I'm going to eat what I want and to hell with what anyone thinks" !

Don't say a bloody word to her, ILB345. If she doesn't already hate herself after the shit your dad said (or even her friends) give it some time.
Had she come back from a 16 day trip, addicted to heroine ? Different story.

$10 says you wouldn't be here posting pictures if she LOST 16 pounds, would you ?

If she continues with the weight gain, than go look for the female superficial version of yourself and leave Laura to find someone who doesn't post pictures of her on social media, asking if you should 'address' the situation, because of a little weight gain.

You're pathetic.

The definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result.

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Wow !
You completely reverted from your body shaming opening post, to telling us you find her more attractive now and think her gut is kind of cute.
You didn't mention any concern for her health in your opening post.

The definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result.

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honestly though, like if it makes her happy, and wants to overindulge, ill support her 100%. And if need be, ill go shopping with her so she doesnt need to keep popping the button everytime she eats haha

So, whats the point of your opening post? We really don't care what size your girlfriend is? You've hit a nerve with a couple of the ladies here, was that your intent?

"First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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It still comes down to the fact that he IS superficial with his 'concern' over her weight gain (body image) instead of her weight gain due to an underlying issue.
It sounds like the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, based on the ignorant comment his dad said, but the OP only has the balls to think it.

ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH THIS GIRL OR NOT ?

Perhaps she's an emotional eater ? Perhaps the stress of exams and graduating was so too much for her and she was starving herself prior to going away ?
Perhaps she thought to herself, "Fuck it, for once in my life, I'm going to eat what I want and to hell with what anyone thinks" !

Don't say a bloody word to her, ILB345. If she doesn't already hate herself after the shit your dad said (or even her friends) give it some time.
Had she come back from a 16 day trip, addicted to heroine ? Different story.

$10 says you wouldn't be here posting pictures if she LOST 16 pounds, would you ?

If she continues with the weight gain, than go look for the female superficial version of yourself and leave Laura to find someone who doesn't post pictures of her on social media, asking if you should 'address' the situation, because of a little weight gain.

You're pathetic.

IMO: People who are not happy with a partner's weight gain are hardly "pathetic" and shaming them for your perceived "fat shaming" is six of one and half a dozen of another. Equal in the "shaming." Even if this particular Op WAS finding the weight gain unattractive, he still wouldn't be pathetic. Some people just can't tolerate a huge physical difference in their partner. This is particularly so if the other is maintaining a healthy weight and body mass. You can still love someone but not like what they're allowing for themselves. JMNSHO, of course.

"First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!