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Tue Apr 3, 2012

hey all.

So although I didn’t really write about it in advance, Momentum has been on my schedule for awhile. Vamp and I decided not only to be a sponsor of the event, but also to attend, and for myself, to speak on a panel on an issue important to me, abuse within the context of bdsm relationships and the bdsm community.

The conference itself proved to have much food for thought, on so many topics that I’m still hashing things out in my own brain. Vamp and I spent a good deal of time in earnest conversation, about our own experiences at the conference itself, with some of the topics presented, and so on. It was awesome to get to spend so much time together. Consider that in the 10+ years Vamp has worked with me on and off, we generally only get time for maybe a single dinner each year. We live 200 miles or so apart, so it just doesn’t happen often. She proved a delightful roomie, and I will admit that I was having a great time wine and dining with her aside from panels. We saw some excellent live music, visited a couple of exceptional restaurants, and did the tourist thing of photos outside the White House and so on.

Unfortunately, while I was gone a tragedy was unfolding at home that impacted my community here, with the horrifying loss of two friends. I knew about it while it was happening through texts and calls from home, but with nothing to be done for it from there, I pushed it out of my mind as best I could. Now home, I am having a difficult time writing about all of the experiences I had while there, at least for now. I’m playing both work and emotional catch-up.

Going to a conference in this area for the first time in years was a good decision – it sparked creativity for what Vamp and I might want to work on next, and I met some amazing people that I had only seen tweets and writings from before. I WILL be writing extensively about things in the coming days and weeks, just as soon as I get my thoughts straight. In the meantime, I want to remember one of the most important phrases I heard at the conference, from educator Charlie Glickman: “Exercise fierce compassion.” To me, that means not just with those who agree with us, or whose experiences we identify with, but to do that as best we can with everyone in our lives, whether friend, acquaintance, stranger. Republican or Democrat, liberal or right wing, vanilla or kinky , privileged or disadvantaged. Life is too short for anything else.
~Jane

Jane, it was lovely to meet you and Vamp right at the beginning of the weekend. Thank you for easing me out of my awkwardness and inviting me to sit at your table on Friday night. I really appreciated the warmth and conversation.