6185FIC: The Gates of the Soul (A Time to Every Purpose 4/10)

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Mo

May 3, 2005

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�You don�t like me because I�m a whore, right?� Scott
Summers had been sitting on his bed, grading papers,
when he�d heard a knock on the door. Seeing who was
there � and what she was wearing - he�d suggested they
move to the study alcove of the bedroom. Given the way
the conversation had gone since then, he was glad he
did.

He sighed. �RoseAnn, we�ve been through this before. I
do like you, and you�re not a whore.�

�You know what I am. You picked me up on the street.�

�I know exactly what you are. You�re a bright,
fourteen-year-old girl who has been through a very
difficult time. You�re a student in my Shakespeare
seminar. You�re a very powerful mutant who�s still
learning to control your powers. You�re a wonder with
anything mechanical and the star of the Car Club.
You�re the noisiest kid in your dorm and you sing
off-key. You�re a talented actress and I�ll talk you
into being in the school play if it�s the last thing I
do. And you�re overdue on turning in your Othello
essay.� RoseAnn rolled her eyes. �I didn�t �pick you
up on the street.� I came to remove you from an
unhealthy situation when Professor Xavier found out
the distress you were in. Look, RoseAnn, you�re not
the only kid here who was homeless before coming to
Xavier�s.�

�I know that.�

�Well, know this: kids on the street do what they have
to to survive. Most of what they do is illegal. That�s
the way of the world. There aren�t a lot of legally
available occupations for underage teens. So, if they
have to support themselves, what kids generally do is
prostitution, or theft, or they�re involved in some
way in the drug trade. For some it�s a little of
each.� He was looking right at her now, RoseAnn knew
it. She felt like he was staring at her, even though
she couldn�t see his eyes. Mr. Summers continued
talking. �It doesn�t mean anything about what the kids
*are* who do those things. It doesn�t mean they�re
whores, or thieves or pushers. It�s what they did, not
who they are.�

�Yeah, right.�

�Listen to me. I�ve been doing this a long time,
taking kids in off the streets. I know what it means
and what it doesn�t. I�ll tell you what it means: it
means kids shouldn�t be on their own at fourteen.�
Scott reached out and held her by the chin. �You�re
not a whore. You�re a student at this school. You are
under our protection. And that�s the way it stays.
Through high school or as long as you need us. I�ve
been here since I was sixteen and I haven�t left yet.
This is your home, as long as you want it to be.�

�If it�s not because I am � was � a whore, then why
don�t you like me?�

Scott sighed again. �I do like you.�

�Don�t you think I�m pretty?� He didn�t answer. �I
just want to make you happy.�

�Good. You want to make me happy? Write your Othello
essay. That would make me very happy.�

�It�s fine. I don�t mind telling you. It�s not a
secret. It�s just not as relevant as I think you�re
concluding it is,� he added with a smile. �Xavier�s is
a coed school, as I assume you�ve noticed. There are
boys here, too. I�m not sleeping with any of them,
either. And I�m not going to. And there are men
teaching here who aren�t gay. And guess what? They�re
not going to sleep with you, either, even if you show
up in their bedrooms at night, too, when you were
supposed to have a meeting in the office, during
office hours. That�s not how it works here. This is a
school. Teachers don�t have sex with students.�

RoseAnn snorted. �You�d be surprised what goes on in a
school. Particularly when teachers know stuff about
the kids they teach.�

�Or maybe I wouldn�t be so surprised. I do know
something of what goes on out in the world. But I know
more of what goes on in here. I have more control over
what goes on in here. This is *my* school, RoseAnn
Mendez. Okay, not mine alone. I know it says Xavier�s
on the door, not Summers. But it was my idea, did you
know that? It wasn�t a school when I first came here.
The professor and the other X-Men and I built it
together. I�m really proud of that, proud of what we
do here. This school is my life�s work, as much as the
X-Men is, as much as the Foundation is. Xavier�s is a
school full of mutant kids, many of whom don�t have
any other homes.�

�I know that.�

�Well, so do I. I know more than you think I do. I
know what it�s like. I was one of those kids without a
home, just like you. That�s why I wanted to build a
school like this. This school is built on trust. And
safety. Trust and safety come from appropriate
boundaries. No one working here � faculty or staff �
is having sex with any of the students. If anyone did
� or even tried � well, he wouldn�t be working here
any longer. Got it?� She nodded.

�RoseAnn, I like you a lot. I think you have a lot of
potential. I don�t think less of you in any way
because there was a time in your past when you had to
get by doing something illegal and degrading and
scary. A whole lot of the kids here have been through
the same thing. A whole lot of us adults here went
through the same kinds of experiences when we were
kids. It affects us all in different ways. It never
goes away, but it gets better. We learn to see it as
part of our pasts, not who we are. We learn to live
with it.�

�Well, it�s not easy.�

�I know. I�m not saying it�s easy.�

�I feel like everybody�s looking at me, pointing at
me. I feel like I�m pretending to be something I�m
not, like I�m impersonating some high school kid.�

�You *are* a high school kid. A particularly gifted
one. Not just mutant-gifted, academically gifted.
You�ve also been through over a year of hell. I know
that. I�ll do what I can for you. So will Professor
Xavier and Dr. Grey. It�s your business who knows what
you were doing before you came here, RoseAnn. I didn�t
tell anyone except Dr. Grey. She�s not talking to
anybody about you but me. She�s bound by
doctor/patient confidentiality. And she�s not a
gossip, anyway. Neither is the professor.�

RoseAnn smiled a little. �I didn�t think they were
talking about me.�

�Well, there�s nobody else to talk about you, because
nobody else knows. Say what you want, when you want.
And don�t ever feel like you don�t belong here. This
place exists just for kids like you. Okay?�

�Okay.�

They smiled at each other. �So why did you stand me up
this afternoon, when we had an appointment?�

She shrugged. �I had this big seduction scene planned.
I figured I had a better chance in your bedroom,
didn�t think you�d be the type who�s into bending a
girl over the desk.�

�Well, now that you know it isn�t going to work, can
we go back to meeting in my office?� She nodded and
stood up to leave. �And RoseAnn?� he added, as she
approached the door.

�What?�

�Write that essay.�

******************************

�How is she?� Scott sounded anxious.

�She�s fine.� Jean looked at him, reassuringly. �No
addiction, I�d say. No withdrawal symptoms to speak
of. She was self-medicating to suppress her powers.
Now that she doesn�t need drugs to do that, she can
let them go.�

�And the medical tests?�

�All the biggies came out negative. No HIV, no
hepatitis. Some scarring on her tubes from PID. She
might need help if she decides to conceive at some
later time. Some much later time, I hope.�

Scott nodded in agreement. �Any prior pregnancies?�

�Two. Both terminated early.�

�She�s fourteen years old!�

�I know. It�s awful. The second one was just a few
months ago. Some john � no way to know which. The
first was her stepfather. That�s why she ran away from
home in the first place. She had no inkling she was a
mutant.�

�I wondered. She told me about the stepfather
molesting her, but I didn�t know if her powers had
started manifesting, as well.�

�No, not until a couple of months ago. She didn�t know
what was happening at first. When she figured it out,
she was afraid to tell anyone. She thought Nick � the
pimp � would be disgusted if he knew she�s a mutant.�

�So she ran away from home to get away from the
stepfather?�

�From him, and from her mother.�

�The mother knew?�

Jean nodded. �Yeah, called her a slut.�

�Some people shouldn�t have kids.�

�We know that. Anyway, she ran to the big city. Old
story. She met Nick. He offered to pay for the
abortion, took care of her afterwards. She asked how
she could repay him. And he told her how.�

�Bastard.� Scott thought a little more. �Have you told
her about the results of the tests?�

Jean shook her head. �I�m meeting with her later
today. Do you want to be there?�

�No, I think you should talk to her privately. She
might feel less inhibited on some topics talking to
you alone.�

�She really likes you, you know.�

�I know. And she�s only beginning to learn there are
ways to express liking someone without sex.�

�Very well, considering. She�s smart. When she applies
herself she does really well academically. I think
she�s finding that hard, though, the discipline of
school. Well, you know how it is.�

�Sure, there�s always an adjustment period when they
come in out of the cold like that.�

�The other kids seem to like her. She�s the only girl
in the Car Club, you know. The boys were all kind of
drooling over her at first. Now they�re awed by her
mechanical ability.�

�Mutant power?�

�I don�t think so. I think it�s just raw talent, that
she�s just good with that stuff. I wish I could teach
her to drive. It seems silly that she can take a car
apart and put it together, but she�s too young to get
behind the wheel.�

�A less law-abiding type would teach her anyway, just
stick to the estate for the lessons.�

�I break the law for better reasons than that.� He
thought a little more. �I�m glad RoseAnn�s settling in
as well as she is. It�s a good sign that she�s getting
into extra-curriculars. She�s really not ready to use
her mutant power; she�s content knowing how to
suppress it. I�ve been having a hard time getting
Charles to back off, though.�

�I know. He told me about it. I think he was looking
for me to talk you into letting him at her.�

�Damn him! He told me he�d wait. He has no business
trying to get at me through you.�

�It didn�t work. I told him you know her best, that he
needs to listen to you.�

�Well, thanks. What is it with him lately? He�s so
*impatient* all the time. He�s always had a bit of a
blind spot when he thinks someone�s power is useful to
him, but for Christ�s sake! She�s fourteen years old.
Since when do we make the students use their powers
for the X-Men?�

�Not since you and I were kids, anyway.� She smiled
ironically.

�Where has Charles�s compassion gone? RoseAnn was
raped by her stepfather, exploited by a pimp, abused
by countless johns. How can he think that being forced
to do something she doesn�t want to do could be good
for her?�

�And forced by yet another man,� Jean agreed. �I told
him just that. I said I thought he needed to have more
empathy for what she�s been through.�

�Thanks,� he said again. �I just don�t get it. I could
just shake him.�

�He�s worried about Cerebro. He�s the only one who can
use it now. He wants me to, as well. It will have to
be a lot more stable before I can handle it. He�s
excited to find someone with Magneto�s power and wants
to use that.�

�I understand all that, but she�ll be just as much use
to him in a few months. She�ll *want* to help in a few
months � she�ll be eager to use it. He can get what he
wants without traumatizing her.� He shook his head.
�Sometimes I think he�s losing it, Jean. Maybe he�s
too distracted by all the political stuff he�s doing
and he can�t attend to the kids with his mind on the
White House meetings and all that. But he�s different
lately. He�s losing his empathy for the kids. He just
doesn�t care about them like he used to. Maybe he�s
just been doing this too long.�

Jean took a deep breath. �That�s not it. There�s
something you don�t know. I keep telling him he should
tell you.�

�Yes, come on in, RoseAnn. Sit down.� Jean motioned
the girl over to the seating area in her office, then
closed the door and sat down across from her. �I�ve
got all your results. I�ve discussed them with Mr.
Summers, as your advisor. Now I want to talk to you.
For the most part, they�re very good. Your body has
been through a lot, but you are young and healthy and
resilient. And lucky.� Jean picked up the chart from
the table. �HIV test negative, hepatitis negative �
all kinds, gonorrhea, syphilis. You don�t have any of
them.� RoseAnn sighed. �Relieved?�

�Very. Mostly about AIDS. I knew so many girls who got
it...� She thought a little more. �You said �for the
most part�. What do I have?�

�Nothing that�s threatening your life. Or your health.
But there is some scarring on your fallopian tubes.
Evidence of PID � pelvic inflammatory disease. It�s
possible that it could interfere with conception or
implantation, should you choose to get pregnant at
some point.�

�I don�t want to get pregnant. I�ve mostly worried
about how not to! And how to get rid of it when I
did.�

�I know. But you�re young. You�ve got your whole life
ahead of you. At some point � some point many years
down the road, I think � you may want to start a
family. And, just to be clear, I�m not saying you
won�t be able to. The scarring is not that much of an
impediment. At worst, you might need some
intervention. It�s just something to watch for.� Jean
put on her glasses and looked through the chart.
�Beyond that, everything looks good. You�re young and
strong.� She looked up at RoseAnn. �I do think we
should talk about sexual activity, about how to stay
healthy.�

�I�m not having sex,� RoseAnn answered quickly. �I�m
not planning on it.�

�Good. I think that�s an excellent choice at this
point in your life.�

�Smart man, that Mr. Summers. Listen to him.� She
turned back to what they�d been discussing. �Like I
said, I think not having sex is a very good choice
right now. Delaying sexual activity is good for your
growth, for both your body and your mind. But you will
likely want to at some point. Most people do. When
you�re older, when you�re in love, maybe. And I want
you to approach sex responsibly, to know that it�s
important to think about staying healthy, and it�s
important to think about the emotional consequences,
too.� She paused. �So when you think you might be
interested in becoming sexually active, come talk to
me. Don�t assume you know everything just because
you�ve been on the street. I want to arm you, to give
you the knowledge � and anything else you need � to
keep you healthy.�

�Do you provide condoms and stuff to kids here?� Jean
nodded. �So you think it�s okay for them to have sex
in high school?�

�I don�t know if it�s okay or not. I don�t think it�s
my place to decide whether or not it�s okay. I think
it�s a very individual decision. I do think it�s
better for kids to wait until they are mature enough,
but I don�t think there�s a set age when that happens.
People feel ready at different times in their lives.
My main concern is that no one here feel pressured or
coerced into sex, and that those students who are
sexually active take precautions to keep themselves
healthy. So I try to give them the information � and
the materials � to make that happen.�

�Well, they kind of tend to stress the health shit in
medical school, what can I say?�

RoseAnn laughed. Then she scowled. �What you said
about when I�m older and in love I�ll want to have
sex? I�m in love now. Well, I think I am. But you
don�t have to talk to me about �precautions.� It�s not
going to lead to sex. He has no interest in me.�
RoseAnn looked down at the last part.

�That�s hard, I know. Few things are more difficult
than unrequited love.�

�Not wisely but too well.�

�Are you reading Othello in Mr. Summers�s Shakespeare
seminar?�

RoseAnn nodded. �Yeah, but you�d think if he loved her
so well, he wouldn�t have killed her.�

Jean laughed. �Well, it�s a wonderful line. Seems to
apply to most people�s lives at one point or another.
Usually without murder and suicide. I�m sorry you�re
going through that now. Although,� Jean added, �I
don�t know that you can be sure he�s not interested.
Boys your age often have trouble letting girls know
when they like them.�

�I know. The boys here are such... children! Anyway,
he�s not a boy, the guy I�m in love with. He�s a man.
Mr. Summers. I really do think I�m in love with him.�
She looked down. �Is that stupid?�

Jean sighed and smiled sadly. �No, it�s not stupid.
He�s a wonderful guy. And having a crush on your
teacher is so common an experience as to be almost
universal.�

�This isn�t just a crush.�

�I�m not saying that to suggest your feelings are
trivial. Scott Summers is a very special man. Hey,
I�ve been there. Believe me, I understand the appeal.
It�s not stupid. If I thought you were stupid, I�d
have to think I was, too.� She laughed at RoseAnn�s
questioning look. �Yes, me. Scott and I lived together
for years. We were going to get married.�

�But he�s gay!�

�Now where were you ten years ago when it would have
been really useful to know that?� She smiled, and then
RoseAnn did, too.