Monday, February 21, 2005

I'M LOSING MY FIGHT

I've been a slug! I've used every excuse in the book. No cardio, no weights, no nothing for two weeks. I've ate bad and done nothing to help myself. I've beat myself up mentally, I've been depressed and now I'm tired of it. The only person who can help me is me. I go to Ray's in Cleveland in less than two weeks and I'm going to make a fool out of myself. I need to start somewhere and I need to start now.

I've never had this much trouble getting motivated. I need to set some firm goals and stick to them. At least when I was racing I had more goals and worked for them to some degree. My goals now should be my health and being able to ride with my buddies without being a burden. I do want to run some 5k's with widds so that should help. If I help Howard with his progress, maybe it would motivate me more.

I hate Landmark right now. That doesn't help me much. I can't wait for World's to open up. Sometimes I think I would do better on my own in a garage somewhere close. Maybe as the Farmingto YMCA gets going I'll look into that or even the HC community center. Oh well I need to do something and stick with it. I'll figure it out. I always do.