The prison blog of an Orwellian unperson. As shown on National Geographic Channel's Banged Up/Locked Up Abroad episode Raving Arizona.

09 Jan 08

New Clothes

When I first lived in America in 1991 I went to a gym wearing clothes from England and people looked at me as if I’d committed the crime of the century. The unwanted attention, explained a friend, was due to my black socks. So, I got rid of the black socks and for sixteen-and-a-half years wore white. Upon returning to England last month, I met various friends who were horrified to see my white socks.“In England, we wear black socks,” Hammy said.“Even with sneakers?” I asked.“Yes, even with white trainers. Don’t worry we’ll soon cure you of that habit.”Now I’m back to black again.

My aunt Sue took one look at my clothes – prison blues and sportswear fashionable in America over half a decade ago – and said, “We’re going shopping for clothes. We’ll take my son Mike. He knows all the latest fashions.”Mike guided me through three stores: Barometer, Blueprint, and Burton. The shoes in Blueprint were narrow and curled up at the toes.Mike recommended a pair, and said, “They’re dead trendy them.”Trying them on, I felt like one of Santa’s elves. I opted for two pairs not so heavy on the curl.As far as tops go, stripes are popular here. I chose three striped tops including a Lacoste shirt. Lacoste was popular when I was a teenager and according to Mike it is back in fashion.I replaced my prison blues with a pair of VOI jeans, and Sue picked out some dress pants. I traded in my Alien Workshop beanie for a reversible beanie from Burton that is black on one side and striped on the other.

Thanks, Sue, for decking me out, and Mike for the sound advice. I feel swanky in the pointy shoes. Thanks also to Barry in Tonopah for the jacket filled with white down feathers - it is like wearing a sleeping bag in this cold weather.