Ellakav, you have a reason for not being able to plan. I'm talking folk who have no young ones at home, and really only have their own needs to consider. In other words, the big decision is yes I want to do it, or no I don't. But don't call me and invite me to something you really have no intentions of doing.

In fact, once I took control of the situation it was great. We grilled my very always popular kal bi ribs. I made some slaw, and had people bring desert. The General was pleased (a practising Muslim, something I didn't know until he showed up at my door, thank heaven I was planning beef and always have beverages on hand for non-drinkers). So I just said, how about some sparkling mineral water? It was a hit. Everyone brought a little something, so the groaning board was really groaning.