Ex-lawmaker Arraigned For Shoddy Grooming

(HARRISBURG) – A former 10-term Democratic state lawmaker was arraigned this week on charges that he failed to shave before having his official photograph taken for the state House of Representatives website.

“Frank LaGrotta desecrated the American flag by posing in front of it with a blatant 5 o’clock shadow,” said Pennsylvania Attorney General Tom Corbett, flanked by a four-foot-by-five-foot poster-size version of the stubble-ridden photograph.

The former lawmaker, who was defeated in the May 2006 primary, was charged with a felony count of shoddy grooming.

Reached by phone following the announcement, LaGrotta told The Gazelle that he has since taken to shaving twice a day. “It’s a hormonal thing,” the Democrat said. “My facial hair has grown super-fast ever since puberty.”