Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Who Am I, Snow White?

Query: Did the woodland animals ultimately tear Snow White to shreds? Why do I want to know? No reason, just a random, hypothetical question.

Yesterday, walking home through Prince's Island Park, a black squirrel stopped me and asked if I had anything for him to eat.

I was so impressed with his use of the English language (almost no hint of a Canadian accent!), that I tore off a corner of bread from the loaf I had just bought and tossed it to him. I continued on my way until I noticed a gray squirrel dancing circles around me.

"What about me, eh?" he asked. Despite the blatant use of Canadian slang, I tossed him a small piece of bread as well.

I turned to resume my walk home when two magpies swooped down and landed next to me.

"S'up?" one of them said to the other.

"I think we've got a live one." bird #2 replied. "Watch this."

"I'm terribly hungry," he said to me.

"You think I didn't hear what you just said?" I spat at him. "Forget it! I won't be played."

What followed was like a scene from "The Birds." Magpies swooped down from every direction. The black and the grey squirrels returned. I looked around for other humans, but saw none. They all stared at me, waiting for my next move. Staring...waiting....

I shrugged and walked home and had a piece of toast.

What? You were expecting maybe a chase scene? Wake up, this is reality.

Hen

ry

Henry finds shade

Let's Name Henry's Fan Club! (Read the post, "Everybody Loves Henry" if you don't know what this is about.) If you have a name to suggest, add it to the comments following the post. Now, Sit! Stay! Vote!