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The Ex-perience

10:31 PM

I came about this idea after observing the recent behaviors of one of my ex-girlfriends. The most recent action reminded of all the other acts committed by her and by past girlfriends. One thing I love, that they hate, is that they hate it when you refer to them as your "ex-girlfriend". If you are still 'friends' with your ex-girlfriend (and it actually works), it's nice to see them squirm when you refer to them by that certain term. They rather have you introduce them as your 'friend' or simply by their name. What can you do though? If you begin to discuss your ex and you use her name, the other person will only ask you, "Oh, Monica? Your ex?" In a way, whether they like it or not, everyone will always label her as your ex-girlfriend.

These are subtle signs of a relationship heading to the ex-it. Sorry for all the puns but I love them and it's very appropriate for this occasion.

She will avoid introducing you to her girlfriends. "No, baby, it's not like that. I trust you but I just don't completely trust them." Seriously? It's the weakest excuse to direct you away from the fact she really doesn't trust you. And why would she ever doubt a gentleman? That's if you truly are a gentleman. This is the same when you are hanging-out with your female friends.

It's perfectly fine for her to talk about her 'issues' but when it comes down to you, she'll deliberately try to avoid you. "I don't know what's wrong, I think my iPhone isn't getting reception." Apparently, that's a reason for a single text message to not get through. She may assume you are an idiot.

A slight trend of you always purchasing things for her. A real lady does not find satisfaction in material things. Sure, they may love to dip themselves in glamor but she will not try to dig into your wallet. If you find yourself buying extravagant (or pricey) products, you are making a huge mistake.

She is too damn independent. It's fantastic and very sexy when a woman can take control while making love but when it's excessive outside the bedroom, run for your life. It's respectable and admirable to see a woman standing on her own two feet, sort of speak, but it's really not flattering when she is in control the majority of the time. A relationship is 50/50, there is always a balance.

She decides to continue being friends with her ex-boyfriend. Now, in very rare cases, a legitimate lady will be able to pull of being friends with an ex and have strictly platonic. One major problem, even those specific rare cases don't know that there will always be a soft spot for their ex-boyfriend(s). 95% of the time it is a very bad idea that your current girlfriend is still friends with her ex. It's common sense. If she is willing to have him as a 'friend' there is a very big chance of her 'hooking' back up with him. This doesn't excuse you from being friends with your ex either...be very careful.

Gradually, she is trying to change you. She's trying to mold you in what type of man she wants. Let's face it we are not perfect, but that does not mean our flaws lead to our downfall. Number one sign of this major issue: you are spending less and less time with your male friends. She thinks by isolating you from your normal life is an advantage. In my past post, I discussed the mastered ability of manipulation of women. Now, this is no different when a nice girl meets a bad boy. Their number one delusion in that case is they have no idea that their efforts of changing that 'bad boy' is leading to failure.

Her finger points at you rather than the other way around. We live in a world of hypocrisy and double standards. She thinks whatever she does is completely justified and that your faults are weighing down the relationship. This is very difficult to recognize if you do not actually talk about these issues with others that have an unbiased perspective. You might actually start to blame yourself since she lays it on you so heavily. A 'worth it woman' will always try to talk things out with you if there is a problem. All you have to do is listen and reciprocate in the proper manner.

She just doesn't get along with your friends. There is a very clear reason for this. Your friends simply do not like her. That is an unsafe route to walk on. The beauty of a relationship is that each one of your personalities reflects the entire relationship. If she can't get along with your friends, that's a direct insult to you. You can see where the problem is...if you have the ability to choose your friends and it obviously works out but where did you go wrong with your girl? Sometimes she will not and will refuse to give an effort. It's not the issue of you looking for your friends' approval; the problem is that this is how she probably behaves with other people in general. It's really unhealthy for you to be separated from your friends. One thing you don't want is when she asks you the most dreaded question of all, "It's either me or your friends." Well, it's not really a question is it? It's an ultimatum, which means nice meeting you and you have a good one. That's when you simply walk away.

These are only some of the many signs but I find that these are the most common. Remember, this can go for both sexes. There is no discrimination between sexes when it comes to a relationship.

- Gentleman Tip of the Day -

Men, it is important to follow some trends in fashion but not when it comes to women. I despise situations where a man is 'forced' to make a decision simply by peer pressure. It's weak, it's not 'cool'. Don't delude yourself in thinking it's the right thing to do. If there is a woman that you fancy and according to your friends she's "not that hot", who cares? As a gentleman, you should know better. This woman, as it seems, grabs your attention without any effort so who cares if she's not "hot" enough for your friends. They are not interested in wooing her, you are. I can't stress this enough, guys. What matters most is her personality. Sure, you have to be somewhat physically attracted to her but whoever said she had to be a supermodel to be accepted by everyone you know? You want to be a real man? Put your foot down and do what you have to do to woo her and make her yours.

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