The Sexiest Things to Do After Sex

Take advantage of the long weekend to snuggle up in bed with your man—and get closer than ever.

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Thanks to President's Day, you'll have a little extra time on Monday to spend cozied up in bed with your guy. And extra time in bed means more chances to get close. Unfortunately, dudes usually zonk out after sex, which can kind of put a wrench in your plans.

"Studies show that following intercourse, the male brain often goes into a rest state — he feels drained and tired — while the woman's brain is stimulated and intensely desires bonding," explains Michael Gurian, therapist and author of What Could He Be Thinking: How a Man's Mind Really Works.

Yeah, that's kind of a problem. But don't stress. We've IDed afterplay moves that will leave you both feeling satisfied. Some are designed to shut down his snooze reflex and electrify his bod; others indulge his just-orgasmed daze while feeding your need for intimacy. So everybody wins.

Guys are suckers for hearing about their sizzling sex skills. "Men can feel anxious about their performance, so they really want to hear it from you that you had a good time in bed," says Judy Kuriansky, PhD, author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to a Healthy Relationship. Your flattering feedback will keep him from dozing — he's definitely gonna stay awake for this performance assessment — and kick-start light conversation, which you may be in the mood for right about now.

So recall the erotic events that just went down in detail, but don't go too over the top. "Whenever a girl raves about the sex but doesn't give specifics, I feel like she's blowing smoke up my ass," admits Ewan,* 27. To start, you can describe your favorite body lock: "That position where I got on top and we both straightened our legs — wow!" Or opt for a little technique approval: "I really liked the way you kept so still while I was climaxing."

Your dirty talk will stay with him long after your thong has been retrieved from the ceiling fan. "It leaves a sexy impression," assures Josh, 25. Plus, there's a long-term benefit to this booty wrap-up: It imprints your fave moments in his memory for next time.

Just because the sex is over doesn't mean it's hands-off. Massage is a great way to maintain that physical connection for you, while prolonging his buzz. Obviously, foreplay hot spots — such as his junk — will be a tender no-go zone. "There's nothing worse than a girl who keeps handling your goods after sex," complains Matt, 27. "It's never a good idea." So, you need to unlock the erogenous zones that will keep your guy in a state of ongoing pleasure, not pain.

For a more relaxing and sensual session, position yourself so that you're lying on your side, facing him. "Trace light circles on his torso. Starting at the chest, move around the navel, skim the pelvic bone and continue back up," says Steve Capellini, massage therapist and author of Massage For Dummies. "Or stroke your fingertips from his collarbone down over his chest to his hip bones and back again."

If you want him to reciprocate, tempt him into action with a more invigorating touch. Capellini suggests a technique called percussion. Have your guy lie on his stomach and straddle him. "Bounce the sides of your hands or push and tap your fingertips along his back and butt," says Capellini. While you enjoy the having your legs wrapped around him, your touch encourages increased blood flow, which makes him feel energized rather than drained — and may even inspire him to return the favor.

When Cosmo asked guys about the most sexalicious thing women could do after getting busy, this was their number-one plea: Suggest a shower for two. It's a no-brainer. Any situation that has you hot, wet, nude, and invading his personal space is bound to overpower his postcoital crash response. "I love being pulled into the shower by my girlfriend after sex. Her wet body rubbing against me — it's all good," says Andy, 28.

Start by taking turns slowly scrubbing each other's back, shoulders, and neck. Then press up against your lover for some sexy snuggling under the shower stream, running your slippery, sudsy hands over his back and butt. The heat-soaked environment not only keeps your bods superclose, but it also actually prolongs the postorgasmic flush of your just-finished booty session. Here's how: "As the hot water hits your skin, it stimulates blood flow and circulation, which keeps your body feeling aroused," says Sandor Gardos, PhD, a sexologist in San Francisco.

If all this postcoital closeness inspires something frisky to unfold between you and him, go there. But ultimately, being so together after being so intimate is often enough of a rush.

If the first romp has left you yearning for a repeat performance — but he's totally wiped out — turn your attention downstairs for some self-stimulation and leave the invitation open for him to take over. "Guys need time to recover before they can go again, and this is only made more difficult if they feel pressured," says Kuriansky. "So let him know you had an amazing time and you just want him to be there while you make the most of how aroused you feel."

Whether he joins in or not, guys love to watch, so it's a win-win situation. "A woman touching herself next to me in bed? That's about as good as life gets," says Christian, 25. Even if your ménage--moi doesn't tempt him out of retirement, you finish on a high note, and he gets a private peep show.

The ultimate compromise between his and her postcoital cravings is the snuggle up. Being held after sex feels so good for you, while he gets to kick back and indulge his snooze reflex. And the good news is, it's somewhat of a mattress myth that men are turned off by a little after-sex cuddling. "There is an assumption that men are more emotionally detached from intercourse than women are. But a lot of them do want to feel that closeness too," explains Carolynn Hillman, a sex therapist in New York City. Craig, 23, agrees. "I wouldn't announce it to my guy friends, but lying in bed together and holding my girlfriend after sex is a big part of the buzz."

Of course, if your man isn't a throw-his-arms-around-you kind of guy, saying "hold me" sounds kind of lame. Instead, let him settle into a comfortable snoozing position and then wrap his arm around you or spoon him and enjoy that just-shagged feeling.