Yummy Yule! (or: Why Does Bill O'Reilly Hate Hanukkah?)

By Neil the Ethical Werewolf
To defend the obvious - a favorite activity among contemporary philosophers - I'll reveal the unobjectionableness of "Happy Holidays!" and "Merry Christmas!" through a semantic analysis. December 25 is Christmas, and the holidays of many peoples occur in the surrounding times. The sentiment expressed by either of these utterances is the speaker's wish for the listener’s happiness or merriment during these periods. This is a sentiment that none should take ill – after all, happiness and merriment in late December are good things, even for Hindu-raised atheists like myself.
This does nothing to make the “Merry Christmas!”-instead-of-“Happy Holidays!” movement any less creepy. “Happy Holidays!” manages to cover Hanukkah, New Year, and various other holidays as well. What does “Merry Christmas!” have to recommend it? Well, it does include the word “Merry”, which is cool in an old-fashioned kind of way. Now, if the merryness of “Merry” were the central argument of the anti-“Happy Holidays!” faction, I would accord them more respect. Sadly, their actual arguments are rooted in an appreciation for trivial forms of religious domination. It's fine to have forms of religious domination this trivial, but it's wrong to desire them.
(The whole issue is, of course, a right-wing attempt to fan the flames of the culture war and generate more of