Triumphant Texans fan pretends to drink his own urine (NSFW or lunch)

Look, I like the Houston Texans a whole bunch. I have a logo magnet on my car, I wear my lucky Texans sweatband when I watch them play, and have watched that Brian Cushing touchdown video from the other night more at work than I should admit.

But I would never vow to drink my own urine in order to show my love and support for Watt and the boys. That’s just me. Call me a fair-weather fan.

The following video came to my attention last night, courtesy of sports blog Deadspin.

Deadspin called this act irrational. I think this endeavor is crazy and foolish, but not irrational. Cutting off your hand because the team lost a game is irrational.

Now, since this is the same week that we were all trolled by Jimmy Kimmel with that faux twerking video, I have reached out to the person who uploaded the video to get his side of the story.

24-year-old Adam Blanca has already admitted to not drinking his own brand and showed his more thoughtful side.

“This may be disappointing (or possibly a relief) to some of you but I must confess that at no point did I actually consume any urine in order to secure a win for the Texans this Monday night,” the owner of the video writes on YouTube. “Of all the many reactions I was messaged and replies I saw the most common was, without a doubt, revulsion.” Well yeah, because it’s supposed to go into the toilet.

He now says that he was trying to bring attention to the lack of unsafe drinking water in third-world countries and posts some links.

“If I saw a video with somebody drinking their own urine I would watch it,” says Blanca. “People say it’s disgusting, but people drinking contaminated waters is a reality across the world.”

After he had already proclaimed he would drink his urine if the Texans beat the San Diego Chargers he decided to be proactive.

“When I realized that you had to follow through with it I thought about how I could turn this into a positive,” says the waiter from Pasadena. He used watered down apple juice to make the fake pee, if you must know. His mom thought it was hilarious and his father was glad that he stood by his word.

But I think in our minds we all wanted to think that a fellow Texans fan would do such a thing, just to know that they are that beloved of a team. I wouldn’t get an Electric Light Orchestra tattoo, but I would support anyone who would. Does that make sense? I doubt it.

Blanca has no regrets. His friends think it was funny, but were glad to know that he didn’t do what we all thought he did. No one in the Texans organization has reached out to him so far, but he doubts that they will.

“Bringing awareness to the water situation is well worth it,” Blanca says. “Over 19,000 people have seen the video and they have read my message, so even if they don’t donate money they are aware.”

How bad could have the pee tasted? I assume something like warm, flat beer? The water left over from when you boil hot dogs? Hangover sweat? If (the biggest “if” ever seen on the Internet) I were to drink my own pee for the team I would at least have spent the previous 12 hours drinking nothing but water to make sure my product was as clear as a bottle of Ozarka. Then I would drink a gallon of Listerine and chew my weight in mint gum.