This reader thinks she made a mistake ending things with her guy, and she wants to convince him to try again. But...should she? She writes: "I am in love. I've been in love with my boyfriend for the last four years. But he isn't as into commitment and, you know, making plans for the future and stuff. Eventually it got to the point where we were just not even spending much time together. We both stopped trying. So I broke up with him. He offered to try harder, and go to counseling, but I said I needed to think about things. I moved out. We've been separated for a few months. Now, I realized that I messed up. If we have some stuff to figure out, I wanna figure it out! I want to be the one who makes him happy, supports him, marries him, etc. But I hurt him, and now I don't know how to get him to realize that we should just be together. Gosh, the way I feel about him is like... indescribable. It's stuff from movies. It's ridiculous. He's stubborn, and he's independent, and I just love him to bits. Any ideas to figure read more

Another day, another reminder of the easiest trick in the world to get guys to see you as more attractive. What is it? The color red! We've heard before how it makes guys think you want to have sex with them, so it's no surprise that it's also a simple and effective way to garner more attention in your online dating profile, according to an essay from new book Drunk Tank Pink (and Other Unexpected Forces That Shape How We Think, Feel, and Behave). An experiment that asked undergraduate men to rate the attractiveness of young women in photographs found that when the photograph was bordered in red, the men consistently rated the woman as more attractive. And it wasn't just limited to finding her pretty: They were more interested in asking her on a date and more willing to spend more on the date. So, should you arrange a quick photo shoot in your new red dress, or use your amateur Photoshop skills to add in a red border on your current profile pic? Well, maybe! Another experiment that used digital software to change the color of a woman's shirt in a picture found that when her shirt was read more

As of yesterday, spring has officially sprung, but you wouldn't know it from the 22-degree weather I woke up to this morning. I wanted to write a post all about the excitement of dating in the spring, but warm weather seems so far in the past that I can't even remember what people do when they aren't living in a freezer. What's it like when you don't have three sweaters on and a possible case of hypothermia? To get inspiration, I did a little search for couples in the spring on our trusty stock-photo source. And now, I have tons of really really great ideas for things you and your lover can do as soon as it warms up! Behold, romantic spring activities for two. You'll notice some recurring themes. Hug in a flower garden. Hug in a field. Hug in a grassy path. Hug in a chair, but with your legs. Hug a musty book. Vow to enjoy nature without your iPhones. Promptly remember why you never leave home without your iPhones. Hey, babe, how do you even read these old-fashioned paper maps?!? Toss around an imaginary ball, because God only knows where you stashed your actual ball or read more

In case you were worried about the fate of Robsten post Twilight, post cheating scandal, and post a million reports about their possibly pending breakup, it seems you can breathe easy. They have not gone the way of Katy Perry and John Mayer, at least not yet. Upon his return from filming in Australia, Robert Pattinson was spotted having a romantic date with girlfriend Kristen Stewart. They posed for a photo with a fan, and everyone looked super uncomfortable. It’s just like good old times, you guys! Sure, Rob looked a little miserable, but these two have never exactly been the poster couple for sunshine and rainbows, so I feel like maintaining the status quo of grumpiness is actually kind of reassuring. They were reportedly “having so much fun together” and being “touchy-feely” at one of their favorite L.A. haunts, Ye Rustic Inn. (Side note to owners of Ye Rustic Inn: I really feel that the full name of your bar should be Ye Olde Rustic Inne. If you’re gonna old-timey name it, do it all the way please.) I don’t know why I have such a soft spot for these two, but I do. Maybe I want to see read more

OK, OK, the kid who asked Kate Upton to prom is pretty cute even though I’m generally over the whole trend of asking celebs to be your date to things. But that high schooler has nothing on celebrity date pleader Ramona. Ramona is a sweet little goldendoodle* with a big fat crush on the First Dog, Bo Obama. Watch this video where she pleads with the President’s Best Friend to be her date to the Oregon Humane Society Doggie Dash: Ramona, girl. I am ALL for a lady asking a gentledog out, but you’re coming on a little strong with the whole marriage proposal thing. Get to know each other first, have a few treats, chew on some bones. You don’t want to rush into things, especially with a dog who has his own security detail. I do hope these two crazy pups can make it work though. BTW, the Doggie Dash is a event that helps the Oregon Human Society be able to find homes for 11,000 pets a year, and there’s a petition for Bo’s participation as grand marshal over at change.org if you support the idea. *But not THE sweetest goldendoodle. I must give that award to read more

Even though I don’t really intend to change my name if I ever get married, I’ll cop to imagining how my first name would sound with a guy’s last name if I’m interested in him. Like, Gena Gosling has a nice ring to it. Or whatever! But you know what I’ve never thought about? Whether my first name and his first name make us better equipped to have a relationship. Probably because that makes no sense, but .apparently, it’s a thing. According to Sharon Lynn Wyeth, creator of Neimology Science, the first vowel sound in a person's name determines their default communication style. Therefore, if two people's names start with different vowels, it may be harder for them to communicate together. You can watch her full video explanation here, but the compared example is the failed marriage of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston (which apparently will never stop being relevant ever in our lives, so just forget about letting it go already). Anyway, since Jen's name has an "e" sound, she has an emotionally driven style, while Brad, with an "a" sound, likes to get his work done first before he can concentrate on intimacy. You'll note that one Angelina read more

During all the Silver Linings Playbook press hoopla, Bradley Cooper said something very atypical for a Hollywood bachelor. When facing speculation about a possible romance with 22-year-old co-star Jennifer Lawrence (because let’s be honest, movie stars who don’t hook up on set are kind of the minority), he denied it, saying "First of all, I could be her father." A young father, sure, since he’s only 16 years older than her, but that’s a pretty significant age gap. Certainly bigger than the supposedly ideal age difference for couples, although not even close to the biggest gap we’ve seen, especially for a celebrity couple. Not to make him the poster boy for a new Hollywood, but it was so refreshing in a world that seems to constantly pair women with men decades senior, both in movies and real life, to hear a big star say he might actually prefer dating women closer to his own age. But now our man Bradley appears to have a new woman in his life, model Suki Waterhouse, and guess what: She’s two years younger than J-Law! As in, she’s 20 to his 38! OKKK then. (So as to not twist his words, I feel read more

Aww, remember when we all fell in love with Disney's animated short Paperman? The whole world, including the Oscars, was charmed by the sweet little story. But cynics out there might have been wondering, OK, that was cute, but what happened after these two random strangers actually had to talk to each other? Welp, College Humor has the answer, and it is predictably hilarious. You've gotta watch: I mean, it's so true: Guys always wanna have a threesome until you try to bring a paper man into the mix, and then it's like, geez, don't be so homophobic, dude! Bahaha! So funny, right? More afternoon funnies: *Need to Turn a Guy Down? Let the Men of The Bachelor Do It for You! *You Must Check Out These Updated Fairy Tales for 20-Somethings (You'll Laugh All Weekend) *3 "Sexy" Products That Will Blow Your Mind. Um, From Laughter. read more

Did you guys catch Selena Gomez's epic zing of ex Justin Bieber last night on Letterman? Catch the full clip (and smug ponytail) over on Obsessed right now! I'll wait until you watch.... OK, you saw it? Great. Pretty good burn, right? Snappy and funny but not so mean and revenge-y that she'll regret it later. (Although, will she regret her decision not to wear pants? Discuss over at Dressed.) It was probably just a joke anyway a.k.a. please don't kill me for laughing, Beliebers! But joke or not, let's talk about our own exes we've brought down. Have you ever made a guy cry? I have! But I didn't laugh about it. Actually, when I had an ex who occasionally used to cry when we would fight and come close to breaking up (ugh, it was college—don't judge my immaturity), I finally understood why guys get so uncomfortable when girls cry. It's the worst! Especially when you know you're the reason for the tears! I would just get all awkward and a little mad, but mostly I would be like OK OK LET'S JUST FORGET ABOUT IT. Ugh. I'm not saying guys shouldn't cry—I like a man who's read more

Look at me, all self-satisfied. (Oh, that's not actually me.) You guys might have heard me mention once or eight million times the huge breakup I went through about a year and a half ago. I'm not beating myself up for still being in the recovery process, but you might remember my confession that despite the drama of it all, I never stopped talking to my ex. You didn’t approve, my friends didn’t approve, my family didn’t approve, even my dog looked a little judgmental when he saw me quietly texting, but I kept at it. I reasoned that it was OK since I had moved away so we couldn’t see each other and fall into any old habits. It wasn't OK. And I finally, finally got a grip on that. I went cold turkey over a month ago, and I am ready to admit that everyone in the world was right. My recovery feels like it took about four hundred steps forward. It didn’t feel so great at the time though. Actually, it felt like going through the breakup all over again. It was as if I had just fought off the worst flu of my life, only to read more

Girls wouldn't abandon us for a break without leaving us with some meaty relationship issues to discuss, and last night's finale didn't disappoint. (Read the full Obsessed recap here.) We took a deep look into the faces of some of our favorite couples, and we saw the demise of a once-treasured relationship and the reunion of two that had failed in the past (well, three if you count Jessa’s lifelong relationship with crop tops and probably vagina piercings). But even in the breakup, there was a door left open for the future. In Shoshanna’s tearful dumping of Ray, she screamed in frustration that she couldn’t be the only thing he liked. Her suggestion? “You go to therapy and like, I’ll have a personal renaissance.” Hilarity of that line aside, her larger point was that while she couldn’t deal with Ray and his literal and professional case of the Grumpy’s now, he could change and she might be able to deal with him better and they can be in love in another time. Could Ray and Shosh really make it work someday? Of course, I hope so, since I really loved them together. But the whole concept of “working on yourself” read more

Sorry, every other couple in the world, your date-night outfits aren't this cool. Their royal highnesses Wills and Kate seem like they are going to be terrific parents, but it appears they have one tiny disagreement already on the baby front Kate wants a boy, and William wants a girl! At least, according to a guardsman Kate spoke with at a medal service over the weekend. Despite her possible daughter clue (which I for one, think sounds like a lot of hooey), the Duchess said they do not yet know the sex of their baby, but that they are very excited. So am I, Kate, SO AM I. Of course, like most couples, I assume that while they might have tiny preferences for a daughter or a son, all they really care about is having a happy and healthy royal baby. But it was interesting to me since I've found, anecdotally among people I know, that guys tend to wish for sons, while women tend to long for daughters. And I'll confess to feeling that way myself. When I picture having kids, I picture baby girls in frilly bows, taking my toddler to her ballet classes, and eventually seeing my read more

You might have noticed that at certain times of the month, you feel a little friskier than usual (and at certain other times, you feel like punching anyone who comes within five feet of you, whoops!). That's unsurprising considering our reproductive system and the monthly hormonal changes women go through each month. But it's fascinating that your body actually physically changes to allow for maximum pleasure. As reported by Women's Health, according to a study of women ages 18 to 35, around the 14th day of your menstrual cycle, some noticeable differences occur. Get ready for some technical sex talk—your clitoris swells by up to 20 percent (hello!), and the artery that feeds into it becomes less restricted, allowing more blood to pump there. The 14th day is also the time you're ovulating, so it makes sense biologically that your body would be making itself ready for sex at that time. Even if you're years away from being ready to try for kids, it's pretty cool to know that at certain times, your body is pretty much begging you to get it on, right? Are you consulting your calendar and planning a special date night for the 14th day read more

Some of us might just straight up destroy all evidence of a previous relationship, but for those who want to keep their memories without having their ex paraded in front of their faces, what do you think of this solution: Keep the photos, edit out the offending ex? The Huffington Post recently pointed out a trend of Reddit users submitting their edited photos. First, a graphic designer who had been asked to photoshop a photo for a woman who wanted her ex-daughter-in-law removed from a family photo: Source: Reddit Ouch. Sorry, ex-wife. Then, there was this post by a regular non-graphic-designer guy who took it upon himself to edit his own photo of himself with his ex-wife. His version is a bit more rough around the edges but also infinitely more hilarious: Source: Reddit Ouch, but...yum? Would you guys ever go to such lengths to doctor a photo? Even though the idea of replacing all my exes with giant hot dogs (yes, there's an intentional wiener joke in there) is pretty appealing for the hilarity, I can't see myself ever seriously altering a picture. I can see why you wouldn't want to sit around staring at your ex or your read more

To ease us into the weekend, let’s have a funny little “Getting to Know You” discussion. It probably involves being naked, but shy readers need not worry: It can be PG too. Here goes... Are there any spots on your body that you absolutely hate being touched? I'll start! In our earlier discussion of foot hookers (yep, that’s a thing), I mentioned that I don’t really like having my feet touched. A massage is one thing, but it’s certainly not a place that turns me on with a touch. And I’ve told you before that I hate hate HATE tongues in ears. Lots of people disagree with me on that one, but I still say barf. It’s not a hard-and-fast rule, but those are probably my hands-off (or tongues-off) areas. As for the men’s side, I once dated a guy a guy who totally freaked out if I went anywhere near his belly button. He just hated the way it felt. And another who hated having his nipples touched. Good thing he'll never be expected to breast-feed. So, what about you guys? Do you have certain spots you just can’t stand to be touched? Maybe you’re ticklish and don’t like read more

I am not above a revenge fantasy. Imagining causing some serious destruction to the guy who wronged you can be so satisfying, it makes for great TV, and it's also better than an Angry Girl Rock playlist as motivation to burn off all those breakup doughnuts at the gym. But I can't believe it when I read stories of people who went through with it. Are they sometimes funny? Yes. Case in point: This Craigslist ad in Canada posted by a woman selling all her husband's belongings after discovering he was cheating on her. (Sample line: "Don't come too early (like he did).) But are they also kind of sad and sometimes downright horrifying? YES. You guys, seriously. Friends don't let friends do dramatic breakup revenge schemes. No matter how good an idea it seems at the time, or how satisfying it feels in the direct aftermath, it's always going to bite you in the bitter butt. Let's take a look at just a few of the reasons it's basically the worst idea since hooking up with the ex you once wanted revenge on: It might just make your ex feel justified for whatever he did. Because now he read more

Hump day seems like a good day for a little confession time, am I right? In that spirit, time to fess up ladies: Have you ever hooked up with someone, then blamed it on one serious pair of beer goggles in the sober light of day? (Ouch. Sorry to that person.) Hmmm, I had to really think about this one. I would say that alcohol has probably made me a little bolder and perhaps a little faster moving than I would normally be, but most guys I've hooked up with? I'd be into them with no liquid courage whatsoever! But if I recall, I do think there was a guy I kissed my freshman year of college that I ended up feeling really embarrassed about. It's not to be mean to the poor fella; he just wasn't my type at all! Luckily, I'm not really bothered by it since it was about a million years ago, and really, who cares about a tiny little kiss or seven? But if you, like me, have guiltily attributed a mini make-out sesh to beer goggles, then you, like me, might be making excuses for your own libido. In contradiction to an earlier study, read more

I feel like people are always talking about the rough patches that couples go through—times they’re fighting, times they’re having a dry spell, times they’re just plain sick of each other—but what about the opposite of that? Sure, every relationship hits some bad times, but as the saying doesn’t exactly go, what comes down must go up. Which means couples must also go through times when everything is just inexplicably right between them. I actually remember my sister mentioning this to me a few months ago. “I’m just so obsessed with him right now,” she said of her husband. “It’s like I can’t even get mad at him when I know he’s doing something that would usually annoy me.” Aww. Call it the return of the famed Honeymoon Period. We all feel all ooey-gooey and bubbly during those first few months, so it's lovely to know it doesn't go away forever after the initial fade. It might pop up when you least expect it, like the first day of spring. Or jury duty if jury duty was super awesome instead of miserable. A celeb example this week? Khloe Kardashian and husband Lamar Odam. According to gossip items this week, he’s read more

Our girl Anna passed on this little video to me, alerting me to a new trick for dudes to score your phone number. Behold: Well, what do we think? You guys, maybe I am just being a humorless beast, but I hate it! As a paranoid safety person, I really don't like the idea of a random person having my phone number, and as a grown woman, I'm offended a man would feel like he needs some cutesy trick to get my number. I mean, I get it, it's a funny little prank. But tricks are for kids, y'all. If someone pulled this move on you, how would you react? Smile? Scowl? Change your number? 867-5309 (Get it?): *Dating: The Dos and Don’ts of Giving a Guy Your Phone Number *How Love Songs Help Guys Score Phone Numbers *Dating Jinx: Saving a Guy's Phone Number Before You Get to Know Him read more

On my last night on my New York visit, I hit the jackpot both in terms of men and in the monetary sense: I met a cute single guy who also has a single brother who lives in Columbus (so convenient wherever I decide to live!), AND I won a $50 bar tab! Well, my entire team and I did anyway (and most of the credit goes to my friend and her husband), in a rousing round of trivia where we eked out a win at the very end despite knowing very little about geography. I don’t know if I’m more proud of our mad trivia skills or my shameless flirting. If the secret recipe for a fun night is cute guys and trivia (with a side of beer), then the secret combo for fearless flirting with said cute guys is a heavy dose of cold medicine and a travel-induced lack of sleep (with a side of beer) and also a need for blog topics. Either way, my unsubtle approach allows me to present you readers, especially those who live in New York, with some available man candy. Meet Alex, the cutie host of Monday-night TriviaTryst at Bar Nine, who read more