Date: Thu, 14 Aug 2003 10:07:38 -0700 (PDT)
From: Tim Mead
Subject: Dr. Tim and the Boys 25
The following fictional narrative involves sexually-explicit erotic events
between men. If you shouldn't be reading this, don't.
In the world of this story, the characters don't always use condoms. In
the real world, you should care enough about yourself and others to always
practice safe sex.
The author retains all rights. No reproductions or links to other sites
are allowed without the author's consent.
Thanks as always to Tom W., my patient, hardworking editor, friend, and
occasional co-author. Thanks also to Ash, Mickey, Evan, and Patrick.
Timmead88@yahoo.com
Chapter25: Unfinished Business
TIM
Classes at the university began on the Wednesday after Labor Day Monday. I
told Cedric that I had to go home the following weekend.
"Timmy, this is only the second time you've been home to see your folks
since you and I have been together. They must be missing you a lot."
"Well, they don't say so. But I need to go. Ced, I'm going to come out to
them and tell them about you."
He squeezed me to him and said, "Baby, it's about time. I'm tired of
feeling like your dirty little secret."
That was a kick in the gut because I had no idea he felt that way. "Ced,
there's no way you are `dirty,' and I've wanted to tell Mother and Dad
about you all along. It's just that the right time never came up. Now I
feel I've got to do it."
"Timmy, I'm glad you are going to do this. I don't imagine you want me to
come along, but you know I will if you want me to."
I hugged him and said, "I love you for offering, hon, but I don't think I
should spring you on them until I've had a chance to explain a lot of
things."
He said, "Yeah, I understand."
He did his thing: he grabbed me by the ass, pulled me up, and kissed me
until I almost passed out.
"Then this weekend would be a good time for me to go home and get in some
family time, too, right?"
"Yeah, why not? And I hope you'll give Angel, Jake, and Keesha my love.''
So, I called Mother and told her I'd be home for the weekend. She seemed
surprised.
"Oh, well, Timmy, that's lovely, dear. I'm sure your father and I can
rearrange our plans for Saturday night."
"Mother, if it's not convenient, I can come another weekend."
"No, no dear. You come ahead. Donald and I will be so pleased to have you
with us."
"Right, Mother. I'll see you Saturday."
"Tim, will you be here for lunch?"
"Do you want me to be?"
"I do have plans, dear. Maybe you had better arrive in the afternoon.
Then we can have a good visit before dinner. I suspect your Father will
want to take us to the Country Club."
"OK, dear. See you early afternoon."
"Be careful, Timmy. I'm so glad you called."
"Yes, me, too. Love you."
"And I you, Tim. Bye now."
The week went quickly, meeting new classes and trying to learn students'
names.
Saturday morning we slept in. When I woke, I was spooned back against Ced,
whose hard cock was nestled in my crack. He had his arm around my chest
and was holding me close to him.
Since I didn't know whether he was awake or not, I wiggled a little to see
what his reaction would be.
"Good morning, sexy. Sleep well?"
I tried to turn toward him, but he held me in place. "Yes, babe, I slept
fine. Now, why won't you let me turn over?"
"You have two choices. You can go brush your teeth or use mouthwash, or I
can fuck you right now. From behind."
I laughed. "I want you to fuck me, studly, but I have to piss first. I
promise I'll brush my teeth while I'm there."
He took his arm away from my chest and said, "Well, in that case, I'd
better go do those things, too. Then, look out, little man, `cause I'm
coming after that sweet white ass of yours."
We hurried to the bathroom, peed, rinsed our mouths with Scope, and jumped
back into the bed.
Even after five months or so, each time Cedric and I had sex it was a new
experience. That first Sunday morning when he came to my apartment, he
didn't have sex with me. He made love to me. And it had always been that
way. He loved me, and he showed me in a myriad lovely and spectacular ways
how much. I gradually learned to use my body to show him how much I
returned his love. He was an enthusiastic but patient teacher, I was an
apt and ardent pupil.
When we got back in bed, we began kissing. I don't think either of us knew
who was going to do what to whom. We knew that if nature took its course,
something great would happen.
Kissing me wetly and sloppily all the while, Ced let his hand begin to
slide down my abs, to my pubes. He avoided my cock and slid the heel of
his hand down over my balls as he stuck his finger in my crack. He began
to tickle my pucker with his middle finger. I twitched as warm feelings
began to radiate from both my anus and my balls. Junior was, of course,
rigid and leaking freely.
Just as I was wondering what I should be doing for him, Cedric terminated
our kiss, took the finger he'd been tickling me with, and stuck it in my
mouth. I sucked on it as if it had been Sneaky. Then he stuck two more
fingers in my mouth, and I sucked on them.
He took those spit-slimed fingers and worked them one at a time into my
burning asshole. Soon I was getting a nut massage. Then he took his
fingers out, slid them around the tip of my cock and over my thigh where
the precum had been dripping, and stuck them slowly back in. He had gone
back to kissing me, and our tongues explored each other's mouths. I knew,
dimly, that I should be doing something to pleasure him, but my brain had
pretty well melted down.
Pushing him away, I turned around so that we were in 69 position. I took
Sneaky, who was covered with precum, into my mouth. Cedric neglected his
attentions to my ass while he took Junior into his mouth. I had learned,
with Ced's patient help, to postpone my orgasms. I no longer necessarily
had a hair trigger. Eventually, though, I came in his mouth, growling my
pleasure as I did. After he had swallowed my cum, he turned around,
flipped me onto my back, lifted my legs onto his shoulders, and prepared to
enter me.
"Timmy, my sweet little man, I love you so much. And now I'm gonna show
you."
"Take me stud! Prove to me again how much you love me. I need your
beautiful Sneaky inside me."
After five months we had learned to mesh perfectly. My chute swallowed his
cock. No pain, no problem. He fucked me slowly, lovingly, interminably,
it seemed. I had just come and wasn't likely to do it again soon. He knew
when to pause in order to hold back his own coming, so he was able to
prolong the ecstasy for both of us. Although I didn't come again, he was
hitting my prostate, and I was in nirvana.
I was in such a sexual stupor that I really have no idea how long it was
before he came. Too soon, certainly. After he had exhausted his supply of
seed inside me, he bent down to kiss me again, ever so tenderly. I was
asleep before I knew what happened.
We woke about 10:00, showered and dressed together, and had breakfast. He
threw some things in a bag, kissed me, told me he'd see me Sunday
afternoon, and left to spend the night with his parents. He said that he,
Rodney, and Francis were going to the Phoenix. I cautioned him to behave
himself. He grinned and said that, though he might enjoy the eye candy, he
couldn't possibly be tempted.
I am always amazed and grateful when he says things like that, but I
believe him absolutely. He has shown me over and over again that he is as
devoted to me as I am to him.
Although I talked with my mother once a week on the phone, I hadn't
actually been home since just after commencement. Occasionally, though
she'd say they'd like to have me come home for a visit, she hadn't pressed.
My father never got on the phone when I called, but Mother would always say
he sent his love.
I left after lunch on Saturday, driving through a hard rain all the way,
the first significant rain we'd had in three weeks. I noticed the elements
had been hard on my windshield wipers and that they were leaving bad
streaks. Interstate travel is frustrating in Ohio because the speed limit
for trucks is 55, whereas it's 65 for cars. So there are these long lines
of trucks in the right lane, often without the required truck length
between them. When some semi driver decides the line isn't going fast
enough to suit him, or perhaps that he isn't going to be bothered by the
speed limit, he pulls into the passing lane. Then, on a busy day like that
Saturday, when they come to an up grade, lines a half a mile long can form
in the fast lane behind the truck who can't pass and can't or won't get
back into the right lane.
Needless to say, I arrived home a little frazzled, but happy to be off the
highway. I grabbed my overnight satchel and went through the garage and
laundry into the kitchen.
Mother was sitting in the family room, which opens off the kitchen. She
was wearing a pale peach two-piece dress in what looked like silk shantung,
with matching shoes. She was fully made up, and I suspected she'd been to
her hairdresser earlier that day.
"Wow, you look gorgeous! What's the occasion?"
She came over to get a hug and give me a peck on the cheek. "We're taking
you to the Country Club this evening. I thought we'd have more time to
talk if I didn't have to cook. You did bring a jacket, didn't you?"
"Yes, Mother. I never go anywhere overnight without one."
"That's right, dear. You never know when you might have to dress
properly."
"Where's Dad?"
"Oh, the church finance committee is meeting this afternoon, and he just
had to be there. He apologized and said he'd be here as soon as he could.
We have 6:00 reservations for dinner. Do you want a drink or something
now?"
"No, I'll wait until you're ready." Then I excused myself to use the john.
I took my satchel to my room, used the bathroom, and returned to where
Mother was. She told me about the visit to Asheville the week leading up
to Labor Day. They had had beautiful weather, played lots of golf with my
aunt and uncle, and had been taken to several restaurants they had never
been to on their previous trips.
"So, it sounds as if you had a wonderful time."
"We did, dear. But Sue and Bill have had some terrible news recently."
"Oh, what's that?"
"It's about Susan."
I'd better tell you about Susan, or Suze, as I always called her to
distinguish her from her mother, who is also Susan and is called Sue by the
family. Suze is three years older than me. Since I never had any
siblings, Suze took the role of my elder brother. Yes, she was a tomboy,
and she made it her goal, I think, to harass me. I don't mean she didn't
like me. She just ran me ragged. She could beat me at tennis, she played
volleyball better than I could (well, she was taller, for one thing). She
knew I wasn't very athletic, and she kept after me to develop some sport at
which I could do well. She was my biggest fan when I began to run. We had
always been close in a competitive sort of way. Currently she was a
physician in a family practice in Morristown.
"What's Suze gone and done now?"
Mother looked distinctly uncomfortable. She had an expression on her face
as if someone had farted. "I don't know how to put this nicely, Timmy, but
your cousin is a lesbian. She has taken a woman, some kind of social
worker, I believe, into her home. They aren't just living together, she
told her parents, they are lovers."
Oh shit!
Using a ploy I occasionally use in the classroom, I asked, "And how do Aunt
Sue and Uncle Bill feel about that?"
"Well, how would you expect them to feel? Sue is heartbroken and Bill is
furious. He refuses to have anything further to do with Suze. He says he
helped her get through college and medical school and she has done this to
him."
"To him? Mother, what has she done to him? It's Suze's life, isn't it?"
"But Sue and Bill will never have grandchildren. And when word gets around
Asheville and back home here, how will they be able to hold their heads up?
How will WE be able to hold our heads up, for that matter? I mean, Timmy,
something like that just couldn't happen in our family."
I wasn't too sure about Uncle Bart, my dad's younger brother, who was a
career Air Force officer and had never married, but I knew better than to
say anything.
"How about Dad? How did he react to the news about Suze?"
"He hasn't said anything at all. He just changes the subject when I bring
it up. But I am sure, dear, that he is as shocked as the rest of the
family."
Well, fuck. That was all I needed. I had come home specifically to out
myself to my parents, to tell them about Cedric and how happy I was with
him -- and hoping my folks would be happy for me. I hadn't really expected
them to be overjoyed, but I had hoped they'd be understanding.
That's when Dad came in. He smiled, shook hands with me, apologized for
not being there when I got there, and said he wanted a drink.
"Meeting not go well, Dad?"
He chuckled. "It beats me how good, Christian men, most of them successful
business men, can be such idiots"
He made three gin and tonics. He handed one to Mother and one to me. He
never asked either of us what we wanted. He took the third one for himself
and sat next to Mother on the sofa.
I got them talking about their recent visit to give myself time to think.
They hadn't visited the Biltmore Estate in Asheville on this trip since
they had been there several times before.
I had been there, too, but the most memorable thing about Asheville for me
was getting to see Thomas Wolfe's home.
I became aware that Mother was talking.
". . . and the Blue Ridge Parkway was lovely, even though the leaves
haven't begun to turn yet. Oh, and we stopped at the nice Appalachian
Crafts Center there. I found the most beautiful chopping block. It's made
of strips of different wood that are all native to the region. I'll show
you when we're in the kitchen."
"Great."
We chatted about this and that. When Dad and I had finished our drinks
(Mother had sipped only a little of hers), I excused myself to go freshen
up for dinner. I ran back to the car through the rain, got the garment bag
from the back seat, and took it upstairs to my room. At least it used to
be my room. But all my furniture, all the posters and things that had made
it mine, were gone. While I was at Stanford, Mother had given everything
to the Good Will. Everything they'd take. She'd thrown out my running
medals. Then she had a decorator come in. Now the room looked like a
display in a furniture store.
I took off my wet shirt and baggy khakis and splashed some water on my
face. I ran a comb through my hair, which was still damp. I changed into
a blue, button-down oxford shirt, a fresh pair of khakis, and my navy
blazer. I hadn't brought the green one because I didn't feel like
explaining it. Besides, blue was de rigueur for the Washington Club on a
summer Saturday evening. I thought about a tie and decided not to wear
one. They weren't absolutely required so long as one was wearing a jacket,
especially in the warm weather..
As I entered the family room, where Dad was having a second g & t, he
frowned when he saw I wasn't wearing a tie, but he didn't say anything.
At dinner, Mother asked me about what I had done during the summer. I told
her about my Lost Generation course, about how I had been working on my
book on Dos Passos, about the town house I'd moved into with Cedric. I
explained that I wanted a bigger place but that I couldn't afford it
without a roommate and had asked Ced to share it with me. Then I gave them
a severely-edited version of my weekend with Ced in Cleveland. I told them
about Steve's being attacked (but not why) and about the two parties we'd
had.
Mother mentioned that she was sorry about the breakup between Amy and me.
"Amy is such a sweet girl, Tim. I can't imagine what happened between you.
She's gone back to Indianapolis, you know. Her school started this past
week, too."
Then I managed to change the subject by asking Mother about her Garden Club
and Dad about his golf. That kept us going through the rest of dinner,
dessert, and back to the car.
Before we went home they took me across the river to show me the
construction of a new highway that was going to cut across Parkersburg,
most of it elevated above the city.
When we arrived home, I mentally grabbed myself by the scruff of the neck
and announced to my parents that I had something to tell them.
Mother smiled and said, "Well, let's all come and sit down in the living
room. Does anybody need anything before we do?"
"Yeah, I could use one of Dad's highballs, and maybe you both had better
have one, too."
Dad gave me a puzzled look, but he made me a highball and fixed himself
one. He looked at mother, who shook her head no.
Then I noticed that Mother was sitting there beaming at me.
"What's with the big smile, Mother?"
"Well, dear, it's not hard to figure out. You've broken up with Amy. Now,
after staying away all summer, you have come home and you say you have
something important to tell us. You think your mother doesn't know? You
have obviously found somebody. There's a new girl in your life, isn't
there?"
Dad chuckled. "Maybe you'd better just let the boy tell it his way, dear."
My mind was racing as I waited for him to sit down.
I took a deep breath, wiped my sweaty hands on my pants, and said, "Well,
Mother, you are almost right."
She trilled a little laugh and asked, "Why, how could I be almost right,
Timmy?"
I looked her in the eye and said, "Because I have found the love of my
life, the person I love with all my heart."
"Oh, Tim," Mother gasped, "that's wonderful!"
Trying to smile at her, I said, "Well, after what you've told me about
Susan, you aren't going to think so for long."
Mother looked perplexed. Dad carefully set his drink on a coaster on the
coffee table. "You'd better explain that, boy."
You know, no matter how much you have learned to cope with, confrontations
with your parents are a hell. I wasn't afraid that night in the Flats when
I alarmed Cedric by marching up to the thugs who were harassing the cute
gay couple and telling them to knock it off. But at this moment, I felt
dizzy. I took a sip of my drink and then gripped it in both hands.
"OK, here goes. Cedric Jones isn't just my roommate. He is the person I
am going to spend the rest of my life with. I love him more than I ever
thought I could love anybody. I know this is a shock to you, but I hope,
when you've had time to think about it, you'll be happy for me."
"Oh, Tim!" Mother said.
"Jesus!" my father exclaimed, "there must be something in the water!"
I said nothing, giving them time to process the full implications of what
I'd just told them.
Not surprisingly, it was Mother who spoke first. "Tim, darling, are you
sure about this? What has this Cedric person done to you? Do you think if
we got you a good, uh, therapist, he could help you with your problem?"
I had to laugh. "Mother, it isn't a problem. Ced didn't make me gay (she
cringed when I used that word), I've been that way as long as I can
remember. And I am happier with Ced than I have ever been."
"But how will we face our friends? What will people say?"
"Tim," my father asked, "are you out on campus? Does everyone there know
about you?"
"No, we've been pretty discreet. Only one of my colleagues and six or
eight friends know. And now you two."
"So, we can contain this. I hope you know what it would do to your mother
and me if the word about you being queer ever got out around here."
"Yes, Dad," I said, looking him straight in the eye, "I know how
small-minded people around here can be. I don't plan to tell anyone in
this area about Cedric and me."
"Small-minded? I would characterize our community as decent, God-fearing
people, son. I don't know how Celia and I could hold our heads up if
people knew about you. And, frankly, what you tell me makes me sick. Do
you know what the Bible says about homosexuality? Have you read the things
in Leviticus? Or what Paul says? And just who is this Cedric? What kind
of a sick pervert is he? What kind of a name is Cedric, anyway? Is he a
Brit?"
"Cedric is a former student of mine, one of our English majors who is going
to law school when he graduates from the university. His parents are
beautiful people who live in Shaker Heights. They know about Ced and me
and have welcomed me graciously into their home."
"Cedric. Cedric? Oh, my God! He isn't black is he?"
"Would that matter, given what you already know about the two of us?"
"How could you do this to us, Tim? You're living with a fag, and he's
black, too?"
I stood.
"Yes, Dad, Cedric is black. He and I are queer. Faggots. Homos. Now,
we've said all the words. I don't think there's much more to say, is
there? It should be easy enough to keep your friends from knowing about
the family disgrace if I don't come back any more. You are invited to come
and visit me at the university. You might find that Cedric is a bright,
beautiful, lovable man. You know, I came here because I felt I owed it to
you to tell you the truth. I had hoped you might be happy for me. I knew
it would be a shock, but still I thought seeing your only child happy would
make you happy. I love you both, but I see now that I'll have to do it
from a distance. I think I'd better go home."
"Tim, I wouldn't send a dog out on a night like this. You can sleep here
and leave in the morning if you want."
"I don't think so, Dad. I'll just get my things and go."
"Well, Tim, you had better not come back until you have gotten over this
nonsense. And please be careful on campus. A lot of young people from
this area go to school there. Word might get back about you and your, ah,
uh . . . "
"Cedric is my lover. And I'll certainly not subject him to a visit here.
As for what we do on campus, that's our business."
When I got back downstairs with my stuff, Dad had disappeared. Mother came
to me and took my hand, perhaps to stave off a hug, and said, "No
grandchildren, Timmy?"
"Gee, I don't know, Mother. Ced and I haven't talked about that. Someday,
if he's willing, we may think about adopting."
"Oh, Tim, that's not what I meant, and you know it."
"Well, dear, that's the only way you'll ever have grandkids," I said in my
best "Iceman" voice.
Startled, she merely said "Oh!"
Feeling guilty, I gave her a peck on the cheek. Something inside me said I
didn't really have anything to feel guilty about, but this was my MOTHER,
after all.
"Say goodbye to Dad for me."
It was nearly 2:00 AM when I got back to the house. Cedric, of course,
wasn't there. I wanted nothing more than to crawl in bed with him and be
comforted by his warm body and his love. Instead, I took a hot shower,
dried off, and fell into bed. Perhaps because it had been such a long day,
perhaps because of nervous exhaustion, I slept well, better than I usually
sleep when Ced isn't with me.
The next morning I went to St. Peter's because I knew Max was taking the
late service. Max did his job beautifully, and his homily was intelligent,
well-constructed, light, more as if he were sharing his thoughts than like
a sermon.
I stood in line after the service to shake his hand and say hello. I was
surprised when I noticed that a man about two people ahead of me in the
line had shoulder-length red hair. When he turned to face Max and shake
hands with him, I could see that it was, as I suspected, David Taylor. Max
looked very serious for a moment when he first saw David, but then, after
David said something, Max smiled broadly, nodded his head yes, and laughed.
Curious.
When it was my turn to shake Max's hand, he beamed. "I saw you in the
congregation, Tim. What's happening, man, getting religion?"
"Don't get your hopes up about that, padre. But how would you like to have
lunch with me?"
"That'd be great, Tim. Can you wait in the parish hall? I have to get out
of my vestments and put in an appearance, and then we can go. Have some
punch and cookies while you're waiting."
I waited in the parish hall, but I didn't have any punch and cookies. That
didn't sound at all appetizing right before lunch. Several people
introduced themselves to me as I stood there sipping on a cup of coffee.
They were friendly, seemed to know I was not a regular member of the
parish, and said they hoped I'd come back. Then Mark and Lori walked in.
I hadn't seen them during the service, but I wasn't surprised to see them.
I think they took turns. One Sunday they went to the Catholic Church down
the street, the next they came here to St. Peter's.
They were surprised to see me. I couldn't explain very clearly to them why
I was there, so I said something about checking up on my old friend. As we
were chatting, Max came in. He had gotten rid of the vestments and was
wearing a light grey suit -- with the black shirt and his collar, of
course.
He stopped to talk with several people and finally made his way over to us.
He gave us each a hug, and then Max and Lori left. They were getting
together with someone for dinner.
"OK, Tim. Something is wrong. Why are you here?"
"Am I that transparent, Max?"
"To me you are. You can tell me about it over the lunch you have invited
me to."
"Well, Max you know how crowded all the restaurants will be at this time on
Sunday. Would you be willing to come back to my place? I'm sure I could
come up with something?"
"Yeah, sure, that's great. But I've got my car here. Why don't I see you
there in, say twenty minutes?"
He gave me a hug, looked intently at me for a moment, and let me go.
Ced still wasn't around when I got back to the house. Since I hadn't
planned to be back from Belpre until suppertime, there wasn't much in the
larder. But I made a salad, put on tomato soup to heat, and began making
grilled cheese sandwiches.
When Max arrived, he had changed into khakis and a polo shirt. He looked
at me with concern on his face. I managed a smile and asked if he was too
full of communion wine, or if he'd like some chardonnay. He grinned and
said some nice, cold chard would be fine.
"But, Tim, you're not going to make me wait until after we eat to tell me
what's wrong, are you?"
I walked over to him and said, "Hug, me Max."
He pulled me to him and held me there, gently rocking me from side to side.
"Cedric should be doing this," he said, finally stepping back, putting a
hand on each of my shoulders. "But I'm glad you knew you could come to me
since he doesn't seem to be around. Now, Tim, what the fuck is it?"
"Did you know I went home this weekend?"
"Did you tell me you were going to do that? I don't remember."
"I decided fairly late, Max. Maybe I didn't tell you."
"Well, obviously something happened."
"Yeah. Sit down and have your soup and sandwich while they're hot." I
poured each of us a glass of wine, ladled out the soup, and set a plate of
the sandwiches on the table.
As we ate, I told him about my coming out to my folks.
"I'm glad I didn't know you were driving back through all that rain that
late at night. I would have been really worried. On the other hand, if I
had known, I could have prayed."
"I made it, anyway. But thanks for your concern."
"And why didn't you spend the night and come home this morning?"
"Well, my dad made it clear that he didn't want me there, but that he would
let me spend the night only because it was raining so hard. I couldn't
stay there under those circumstances, so I left."
"You know, Tim, I've met your parents several times. They were never
overly friendly, but they always seemed nice enough. I can't believe they
were so unfeeling with you."
"I'm a little shell-shocked, too, Max. I knew they wouldn't exactly be
thrilled, but I didn't expect to run into such a wall. I realize my timing
was terrible, because they had just had to cope with learning that my
cousin Suze is a lesbian. That reminds me, I want to get in touch with
her. She's probably hurting from the way her folks reacted. I can give
her a little moral support, at least."
"Yes, you should do that without fail. Now, getting back to your folks,
Tim. They may soften their hard-nosed stance in time. Give them a while
to think about it."
"I'm trying to give them all the benefit of the doubt, Max. I think you
know they aren't warm people. We've never been a cuddly family. But I
think I'm finding out just where I have always stood in their scheme of
things. I wasn't the jock son my dad wanted, and a PhD from Stanford
doesn't make up for that. I've never been religious. By the time I got to
Kenyon, as you know very well, I was sick of being yelled at for 45 minutes
every Sunday in church. I was sick of the minister putting down
foreigners, non-conformists, gays, and other perverts. I guess my parents
picked up on that and felt that I was rejecting them and their values. You
know, the whole church, country club, golf, and garden club scene. So all
that has come back to bite me in the ass. I guess I can't feel too sorry
for myself, can I?" I grinned at him.
When we finished the soup, salad, and sandwiches, I offered Max an apple.
He declined and suggested he should go. I asked him to stay. So he sat on
the couch. I sat beside him.
"Tim, being on the outs with your family will be tough. They may come
around in time, if you are smart enough not to cut all the ties. But in
the meanwhile, look what a support group you have here."
I swiveled around to face him pulling my legs up so I could sit Indian
style. "Yeah, Max. I haven't been home much since we graduated from
Kenyon. I was on the West Coast and only got home for a couple of weeks in
the summer. It isn't as if I we live in each other's pockets. But, as you
said, it really hurts to think that they have in their own way, without any
words of animosity, thrown me out."
He turned toward me and sat as I was sitting, legs folded under each other.
"Time and patience, Timmy. Meanwhile, you have your Cedric and the
Brotherhood. You're a special guy, Tim, and you have gathered special
people around you."
I chuckled.
"What's funny?"
"Someday Max, not yet but someday, I must tell you how I `gathered the
Brotherhood' around me. You'll never believe it."
He grinned. "That sounds like a real story. I'll be eager to hear it when
you are ready to tell me."
"So, now YOU must tell ME. What was David doing in church this morning,
and what passed between you as he was leaving?"
"You haven't told me what you were doing in church this morning."
"Well, duh. I should think that's obvious. I needed you. I knew where
you'd be, so I came to you. I really liked your homily, by the way."
He grinned. "Praise from an expert? Thanks, professor. As for coming to
me, you do know, don't you, that I am always here for you? Oh, damn, that
sounds so trite. But you know what I mean."
I put my hand on his knee and squeezed. "Yeah, Maxie, I know what you
mean. And I count on your steadying presence in my life."
He looked me in the eye, perfectly serious, and said, "Whatever happens,
Tim, you and I need each other. Wherever we are, whatever life brings us,
if you need me, I'll manage to be there."
I choked up. "Me, too. You know that, I hope."
He chuckled.
"What?"
"Oh, it's just fun to see the glib one, the English major, having trouble
finding words."
"Glib? Me? I'll get you for that, Hewitt! Now, answer the question.
What was David Taylor doing in church this morning?"
"I was surprised to see him, too. He said he had leased an apartment in
town. He explained that he could live anywhere in the greater Cleveland
area and still do his job, which required a lot of traveling. Since he had
met all the guys at Chaz and Trey's the other night, he thought he had a
ready-made bunch of friends, so he decided to locate here."
"Well, that all makes sense. But you haven't answered my question."
He looked puzzled. "What was your question?"
"Oh, Hewitt, your logic is slipping. The question was what David was doing
in church this morning."
Max looked puzzled. "You know, Tim, he didn't say, and I haven't a clue.
He told me at the party he doesn't like churches."
"Perhaps, old friend, the sexy Mr. Taylor, of turquoise silk harem pants
and nipple ring fame, is attracted by St. Peter's sexy new curate."
Despite his ruddy complexion, Max blushed. He was beet red. I've never
known him to blush like that before. He started to say something, and then
began to cough. He coughed so much I jumped up and got him a glass of
water.
When he quit coughing and set the glass on the coffee table, I said, "Aha,
see! I suspected as much. David has the hots for you. Or vice versa,
maybe?"
He smiled. Was there a wistful look on his face? "I think you have it all
wrong, Tim. I had the distinct impression after the party last Saturday
night that David didn't like me at all, that he didn't even like to be
around me."
"Then he came to your church, of all the churches in town, to . . . what?
And what about the `vice versa,' Hewitt? Is it possible that the curate of
St. Peter's has a thing for the sexy David with the long, red hair?"
He chuckled. "OK, you have your fun. I admit that I was turned on by the
scenes involving David in Chaz's diary. And I admit that in the flesh he's
not disappointing. But I see no reason to think he has any interest in me.
As I said, I got the feeling at the party that he was less interested in me
than in anyone else there. So, Junger Mann, ve are left mitt ein mystery,
nicht wahr?"
I laughed. "Max, you are wonderful, my friend. You've pulled me out of my
funk. I am so glad you are back in my life."
"Me, too, Timmy. But I had better be going. I'm not sure it would be good
for Cedric to find us here. You did say he'd be coming back from Shaker
this afternoon, didn't you?"
"Yeah, I'm hoping he will be here soon, but you don't need to rush off."
Max stood, pulled me up, put his arms around me, and kissed me on the
forehead. As he did so Cedric walked in the door.
Max was magnificent. He slowly let go of me. Then he walked toward Ced.
He held his arms out to Ced for a hug, which he got.
As they pulled apart, he said softly to Cedric, "Take care of your man. He
needs you."
Cedric smiled at him and nodded. Then Max thanked me for lunch, hugged me
again, and left.
As soon as he was gone, Cedric came to me and gave me THE KISS.
A couple of minutes later, nearly breathless, I asked, "Have you had your
lunch, babe?"
"Yeah, Sunday dinner in all its splendor from Angel. I won't be able to
eat until at least 5:00. Now," he said, pulling me down on the sofa where
Max and I had been sitting, "what happened in Belpre?"
I went through the whole sorry story again. He took my hands as I talked
and made sympathetic noises during the narrative.
At the end, I said, "You know, babe, I feel as if I've been driven out of
the pride."
"Nah, Tim. You've been The Lion of a new pride since last spring. You
just know now that you can't go back to the old one. That's the way life
is, sweetheart. Like it or not, you can't go home again. But you've got
our expanded brotherhood, the four of us originals, plus Steve and Max. We
all love you. We look up to you. You keep us honest and decent. Of
course, you keep me on the bone all the time, but that's beside the point."
I laughed. "I like that point best of all, baby. But thank you for making
me feel better. I don't have anything to complain about because I know I
have you."
"Do you really know that, Tim?" he said, looking unusually serious for a
moment.
I went and sat close to him. "Yeah, baby, I really know that."
I feel asleep as he held me. When I woke up, smooth jazz was playing
softly on the stereo, music from Cleveland State's FM station. It was
almost dark. I was lying stretched out on the sofa and Cedric was sitting
in one of the chairs, looking at me.
"How long have I been asleep?"
"A couple of hours. Your short night caught up with you. Now, I'm ashamed
to admit it after Angel's big dinner, but I could eat. Wanna go get
something?"
"Not really. I'd rather just stay here with you. Do you have studying to
do for tomorrow?"
"Yeah, a little bit."
"I have to look over some class notes, too. Why don't we send out for some
pizza? We can eat that while we work, and then we'll be able to be
together again for a while before we go to bed."
He grinned. "Sounds like a plan, my man."
Later, as we were getting out of our clothes, he said, "Dr. Mead, sir,
tonight you are my lion. I want you to cuff me, maul me, whup me around,
mark me as yours."
"Cedric, baby, I can't do that. I love you too much to be violent with
you."
He grinned. "Who said anything about violence, Lion? I just want you to
fuck me through the mattress!"
Pushing him down on the bed and jumping on top of him, I said, "Cubby, I
think I can do that!"
[Chapter 26 will be posted in about a week. --T.M.]