Messages - txaggie

I got home from class today to find a message on my machine from the assistant dean of GMU... asking me to call her back. Is this weird? This is the first time I missed a call, so I don't know what they usually do, but I always assumed that they would just announce whether the accepted you, WL you, whatever.

And from the tone in the woman's voice... I feel like I'm in trouble? But I may be imagining that.

Margee, go to Texas unless you've got an ailing parent in Houston for whom you must care. Don't be that one person a year who chooses UH over Texas.

There might be two this year. I'm wrestling with the quality of life (husband and lots of family in Houston) vs quality of education issue. Everyone here probably thinks I am freaking NUTS, but it's a hard decision.

Strangely, this is affecting me more than I thought it would. Affecting me in the sense that

1. UT offered me $7,0002. UH offered me $7,5003.

So the financial difference to me is about the same as it would have been if I hadn't been offered $ by either. Dammit, I was hoping UH would make this an easy choice for me.

Would you mind at all telling me (or messaging me) your stats? I'm trying to decide between UH and UT as well, but I haven't heard anything about scholarships yet (from either school). I'm going nuts over here! I probably applied a lot later than you, though, so this is what I get!

1. University of California–Berkeley2. Stanford University (CA)3. George Washington University (DC)4. University of Houston5. Cardozo-Yeshiva University (NY)6. Franklin Pierce Law Center (NH)7. Columbia University (NY)8. Duke University (NC) New York University10. Boston University11. DePaul University (IL) Harvard University (MA)13. Illinois Institute of Technology (Chicago-Kent)14. Georgetown University (DC)15. John Marshall Law School (IL) Santa Clara University (CA)17. University of Minnesota–Twin Cities18. University of Texas–Austin19. Michigan State University Washington University in St. Louis21. University of California–Los Angeles22. Fordham University (NY) University of Pennsylvania24. University of Washington25. George Mason University (VA)26. Boston College27. Case Western Reserve University (OH) University of Michigan–Ann Arbor

Archival:There is no need to be condescending because I am young. I do not agree that I am "not helping women in general" because I am "harping on statistics". And, maybe you are reading a tone from my posts that I do not intend to be there, but I am not "fretting". Please elaborate on how exactly I am negatively affecting my own gender by citing statistics that are true. If you are already aware of these statistics, that's great, but you don't need to jump on me. I don't see what the problem is with me posting something just because you consider it well-known.

I hope that no one else read this stuff from my posts, because I certainly didn't intend on being offensive.

The larger purpose of my post was to point out that there are benefits to waiting.

Yes, and the larger purpose of my post was to point out that there are also negatives to waiting. These are things that people should be aware of when they decide to put off kids as opposed to when they decide to try to have kids. I know that if I was 45 and heard those statistics for the first time, I would wish that I had known them when I was younger and making my original decision to wait to have kids. Not necessarily because waiting is a bad decision, but just so I could have made an informed decision.

The statistics on chromosomal abnormalities are a small part of the data on risks that you will end up weighing if and when you get decide to try and get pregnant - your friends, family, care provider, and the internet will make sure of it. There is a lot of fear and blame that women are exposed to in their reproductive lives (during infertility, pregnancy, birth, and parenting.) If and when you do decide to try to have a family, you will be bombarded with well-intentioned, personal, heartbreaking stories of tragedy and pain, as well as a barrage of statistics.

Very true. But please let me point out again that people should be aware of these things when they are deciding to put off kids, just so they can make an informed decision.

Well, I typed out a long message and lost it, so here is the short version...

Those stats are correct - they came straight from my cytogenetics textbook. And they only account for a specific chromosomal abnormality (down's syndrome) - so that 1.7% chance doesn't account for other chromosomal and genetic abnormalities. *HOWEVER* the chances of abnormality rise exponentially in years 35 to 45 and older - I wouldn't advise waiting til you were 48 to have your kids, but I didn't mean that a pregnant 38-year-old is doomed to have an ill baby. I just feel like that is info that people should be made aware of - I remember being very shocked the first time that I read those statistics.

But I myself plan to wait til after law school, and probably after I've had a job for awhile. The superwoman (mother/wife/career) dilemma is a SOB.