May 2016

05/08/2016

Motherhood is an aching exhaustion so deep you could never imagine it before until you’ve experienced it.

I envisioned shaping my children’s life. I was going to be the perfect mother, have the perfect children. Feed them all the right foods; Fresh meats, organic-steamed vegetables… sweet fruits – nothing was too much for my children. Their clothes would be nicely pressed, Tommy Hill, Dior, Polo. I was going to cuddle with them.

I was going to be mother of the year. That’s how you conquer the world, by creating a benefit to our society.

Did I ever, for a moment dream my children would shape me? That my world would become a big question. Why?? Why won’t you eat my home cook meals, my tender steamed vegetables, the best fruits I especially selected for you? Why are you so sloppy? Why do you cry, sweetheart? Why do you whine so much? Why won’t you let me smother you? I want a cuddle. Why? Why? Why?

Learning to take each day and moment as they come is not only necessary for survival as a mother, it is the key to endless joy and wonderment of your child who will unlock your life. Every moment for me was not planned, but was and is completely fulfilling. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

And that’s what is all about at the end of the day. You’re happy for all the crazy, sweet, angry moments with your children. And that ache that you feel becomes the one feeling you yearn so much for, for the rest of your life. You give your children life and at the end they are your life.