Nonprofit auctions off MMS memorabilia

Cleaning house at the agency formerly known as the U.S. Minerals Management Service apparently means more than just changing the name and dividing responsibilities. While the newly christened Bureau of Ocean Energy Management Regulation and Enforcement (the BOE, or BOEMRE or something like that) orders new letterhead, the old MMS swag is for sale.

PEER

Nothing says “oil spill” like a fun loving whale,” PEER’s auction description says. “This plush whale is embossed with “MMS Environmental Studies Program” and bears the most clueless grin you’ll ever find on a cetacean. The mascot shows just how much fun acoustic shock waves can be for migrating marine animals.”

The nonprofit Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility, which urges government agencies to uphold environmental standards, got its hands on MMS tote bags, keychains, paperweights and stuffed animals donated by MMS employees, which the group put up for auction to benefit its organization.

PEER’s descriptions of the auction items are pretty caustic. “Walking away from your responsibility can really be the path to better health!” is the sales pitch for an MMS pedometer. A 25th anniversary pin is ” a reminder of the agency glory days, before sex, drugs, Sugar Bowl tickets, massive royalty give-aways, and, yes, that thing in the Gulf…”

Kate Hornyan, the membership and outreach coordinator for PEER, told the LA Times’ Greenspace blog that coming up with the descriptions was a team effort. “We thought some of the ideas were funny,” she said.

But in a letter to the BOE, PEER director Jeff Rush was a bit more respectful. MMS memorabilia has historical and cultural significance, he argued, saying PEER would be happy to help the swag find “appreciative homes:”

Apart from avoiding the sheer waste of public resources, you should regard the piles of pen sets, coffee cups, windbreakers, etc. as important cultural and historical resources. These relics mark the existence of what has become an important institution, whose role, actions and policies have left an imprint and made an impact that all Americans will experience for years to come.