[en] (Abridged) The luminous z=0.286 quasar HE0450-2958 is interacting with a companion galaxy at 6.5 kpc distance and the whole system is a ULIRG. A so far undetected host galaxy triggered the hypothesis of a mostly "naked" black hole (BH) ejected from the companion by three-body interaction. We present new HST/NICMOS 1.6micron imaging data at 0.1" resolution and VLT/VISIR 11.3micron images at 0.35" resolution that for the first time resolve the system in the near- and mid-infrared. We combine these with existing optical HST and CO maps. (i) At 1.6micron we find an extension N-E of the quasar nucleus that is likely a part of the host galaxy, though not its main body. If true, this places HE0450-2958 directly onto the M_BH-M_bulge-relation for nearby galaxies. (ii) HE0450-2958 is consistent with lying at the high-luminosity end of Narrow-Line Seyfert 1 Galaxies, and more exotic explanations like a "naked quasar" are unlikely. (iii) All 11.3micron radiation in the system is emitted by the quasar nucleus, which is radiating at super-Eddington rate, L/L_Edd=6.2+3.8-1.8, or 12 M_sun/yr. (iv) The companion galaxy is covered in optically thick dust and is not a collisional ring galaxy. It emits in the far infrared at ULIRG strength, powered by Arp220-like star formation (strong starburst-like). An M82-like SED is ruled out. (v) With its black hole accretion rate HE0450-2958 produces not enough new stars to maintain its position on the M_BH-M_bulge-relation, and star formation and black hole accretion are spatially disjoint; the bulge has to grow by redistribution of preexisting stars. (vi) Systems similar to HE0450-2958 with spatially disjoint ULIRG-strength star formation and quasar activity are rare. At z<0.43 we only find <4% (3/77) candidates for a similar configuration.