Friday, October 15, 2010

National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day

Wow - this is hard to get out, so I am just going for it.

I have had way too many close, dear friends and family members suffer the loss of a child the past few years. Some friends lost their babies early in pregnancy and some lost them after they were born. I have cried with them, prayed for them,felt helpless to help them, and hoped and dreamed for them. I also know I most likely have friends who have suffered a loss that they never talked about, that I don't know about.

Anyone that has lost a baby please know that your babies are not forgotten. We remember your pregnancies. We remember the joy and excitement of when you told us. We remember going to buy baby things. We remember the anticipation of wanting to know if you were having a girl or a boy. We remember the excitement over finding out you were having a girl or a boy (like there are any losers there!). We remember talking to you about your baby and hearing the love in your voice. We know that those babies are loved so much and are missed today.

We also remember and acknowledge the heartbreak. We know you are not "over" it. We know you have continued on in life, maybe have had more children, but we know you still miss and long for your loss. One of the many things that I have learned over the last year is that everyone handles trauma, heartbreak, and hard situations different and there is absolutely no right or wrong way to deal with it. So if you would rather not talk about it, that is fine. There is nothing wrong with that. However, if you feel the need to talk about your loss, your baby, or your trauma, that is also fine and you really should. Please know that I (and many other people) have an open ear and an open heart. We are here for you, whether it is today, tomorrow, or twenty years from now. We have not forgotten your babies. We love them and we love you.