Saturday, December 17, 2011

Finally a Papa...

Papa here.Yep,I’m now truly Papa.

At one point of my life I wondered why I’d have kids.Now, I don’t know how I ever even thought that.There are the moments where the baby is shrieking because her diaper is blown out, or her bottle is not delivered in a timely manner, but I do it all gladly just to have her look up at us, to grab my pinky, to watch her let me know that anything other than me holding her won’t do.

Mike and I are sleeping in shifts.Long term I’m not going to be able to handle that, but with a newborn, it’s what we’ve agreed to.If one of us isn’t off in another room when we need sleep, she’ll wear us both out.Every two hours there’s a diaper change and a bottle feeding.Megan has been amazing with providing us with breast milk, and it’s worth the effort to get it bottled, warmed, and ready.

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1 week old Zoey

As I helped my husband give our daughter her first bath last night, I realized how much our lives are changing.It was heartwarming to watch Mike wash our little girl.I call her “Baby Kitten”.Our lives gratefully revolve around her right now.The sleep deprivation and cabin fever are just temporary.The initial chaos is slowing gelling into a routine.

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I have another month from today before I return to work.I need every moment frankly.We’re renovating our house right now (please don’t do this when you’re expecting a baby!!!!), and the 30 minute drive north is excruciating.All I hear is a song called “Highway 20 Ride”, it’s on YouTube.One of the lyrics is “I count the days, and the miles back home to you…”.I’m not even 10 minutes away and I’m sobbing.With a newborn you’re constantly in an emotional hangover.I miss my husband and baby even in the other room.I know….get a grip Papa.

We’ve had some great moments.Some of them are the look on Mike’s mom’s face when she saw Zoey for the first time, and our re-enactment of the Lion cub presentation scene out of Lion King.If you’ve seen “Modern Family”, it’s the scene with Cam with Lily.BTW, Mike IS Cam.Only more butch.

Seeing Zoey grow and change already is something to see.She’s found my chest hair, and she has a really good grip.She seems to recognize faces, and has a strong neck for looking around.Her first Pediatrician appointment is this next week.My job has been holding Zoey for pokes and shots.We haven’t started shots, and we’re conservative with what we’re doing for immunizations, but I have been holding her for two blood tests.I hope she won’t remember it, but she looks me square in the face.