Why so many Moms struggle with anxiety

Every day I hear that some Mom have postnatal depression or struggle with anxiety. It’s not a big surprise for me because I had the same problem. I didn’t want to admit that something is wrong with me because I was afraid I can lose my baby or someone will think I’m crazy. When my HV saw that something is not right I said I’m OK and that’s only my hormones. She wrote down ‘baby blues’. I was glad she didn’t want to talk about it and she changed the topic. But today I think I could ask for help maybe conversation or any other support could make a big difference. On the beginning of my motherhood journey, I was crying a lot, I wasn’t patient and I saw everything in dark colours. Now I can’t believe I was so depressed because my son is the loveliest baby I know.

Now I know I wanted to be too perfect. I wanted to do everything as should be. I wanted to have easy labour (as every Mom) but it was a f*cking horror. I wanted to breastfeed but after 2 months long battle I fed up. Everything went not like I planned. But it was really so bad? No, it wasn’t but when you read on the Internet how bad Mom you are because you are not breastfeeding it making you feel like a sh*t. As a first time Mom, I knew nothing about motherhood. I didn’t know how to take care of the baby. I didn’t know how often he should eat, what he should wear, how he should sleep. So I wanted to follow my instinct. But it’s so hard when you hear so many different opinions. Your Mom, aunt, neighbor, sister, friend, literally everyone has something to say.

What questions annoyed me the most?

Don’t you think your baby is eating too much?

Don’t you think your baby is too fat?

This time your baby should sleep through the night.

Why do you not prepare baby’s food by yourself?

Why your baby is drinking something else than milk?

Are you breastfeeding right?

Did you loose your weight?

There was much more. How you can not struggle with anxiety if everyone tries to tell you that you suck. You are not good Mom enough. They don’t want to understand that everyone is different. You don’t have a manual for babies. Everyone is parenting in a different way.

So now as a Mom who struggles with anxiety I have something to say to you. Do not listen, other people, unless they want to really help you. You don’t need to be perfect to be a good Mom. Do what is best for you and your family. If does it mean you need to stop breastfeeding, you need to share your bed or introducing solid food in jars than do it. Do not hesitate to make a decision that suits your family. You can’t make everyone happy but you can make your family happy and it’s the only thing what matters. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You are not the only one. You are not the first one. But you will beat that s*it and you will be yourself again. You will cherish your motherhood as same as me.

If you have any question please do not hesitate to ask. Share your experience 🙂

It is so true that the only important thing is being happy with your family. It’s best not to listen to others that want to force their opinions and ways on you, even if they feel they are only trying to help. Often such advice is not helpful and you have to do what you know will be good for you and your own family. Great post and best wishes for your lovely family.Nicole Anderson recently posted…The Complete Safety Guide for Camping with Dogs

So true that so many others feel the need to share their opinions. I am a mom of two boys, ages 6.5 and a one year old. I trust my judgement and instincts. I think all moms experience some sort of anxiety because women in general want to be the best and are just amazing beings. Praise yourself mama…it will be ok!

I used to struggle with this so much. Trying to please every one and be the perfect parent in every one’s eyes… Impossible! Theres a quote that goes something like, “There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, only a good one.” It reminds me that as long as I’m doing my best, I’m doing right by my family.

This is part of why I hope to be able to support my friends and family who are parents, rather than becoming one myself. With social media creating shame and pressure, and things like childcare being so costly, I want to make it easier and happier for those around me 🙂

You are so right – first time mamas have NO CLUE what they are doing (and it’s hardly our fault!), but tons of unsolicited advice and well-meaning but non-constructive criticism are really hurtful, and often do more to harm the new mama than build up her confidence. Thanks for writing this.

Lack of knowledge on the part of the mother can lead to having fear of what might happen. Our own family can be a source of strength for us. Additionally, learning the basic can help us ease the feeling of anxiety because we know that we have enough knowledge on how we could address things.Sharon S. Lopez recently posted…How to Withdraw From Perfect Money to Philippine Bank

I was very lucky that I did not suffer from post partum depression. I was exhausted – especially with the last 3 or 4 (we have 10 kids). My mother-in-law drove me crazy. She was always asking “are you SURE that they have had enough”. She bottle fed her boys, and it really bothered her that I breast fed all of mine. You just have to take one day at a time, and know in your heart that you know what’s best for your babies!

I’ve had struggles like this before when I gave birth to my son. But I realized, as a mom, that I should brush off unsolicited advice and go with my instinct when it comes to what’s best for my son. And it really helps to surround yourself with TRULY supportive people.

I think part of being a mother is living with some level of depression and anxiety. My anxiety stems from my children being away from me, being places like school make me loose my cool. I am learning to manage my anxiety but I believe I will always be a work in progress. I also wrote about my experience on my site.

It’s so true, it can get really confusing when everyone is trying to give you an opinion on how you should be a parent, but as you said, only consider listening to those who truly love and care for you!

This is a great post for those moms who struggle with anxiety and those who don’t. It is so important to all moms to know they every parent is different just like every child is different. You don’t have to follow what your friends or other moms do because you are the one who knows your baby in my opinion. Thanks for sharing your story.

I’m not a parent but I definitely have issues with anxiety and stress. I can’t imagine what it’s like to have people try to critique you or tell you how to be a better parent. You know what’s best for your family; listen to your own heart and the rest will follow.

Encouraging support is so helpful. I also pray and surrender my concerns to my Creator, which is such a blessing. “He will give you perfect peace…”Katie recently posted…10 Sensory Slime Recipes You Have to Try

That is so true! Love this post! There is TOO much pressure on us to make everything right! But really there’s no one way to do everything especially when it comes to kids. You do what you think is right for you and your family, not because someone told you so.

I’m amazed at the amount of mums who struggled in the first year with their emotions. You are right that there are too many people making judgement and not supporting mums. They say queens should support each other, but they should also not ask questions that aren’t starting with “can I help you do ……..”
Thank you for sharing this with us at #TriumphantTales. I hope to see you back next week.

Yes! People and their questions can make us feel like crap. I went to the health visitor the other day and mentioned our slow weaning progress and she basically told me to stop breastfeeding. But that would make my boy very unhappy and whilst I will slowly reduce it, I am in no way going to just stop giving him what he wants! Thanks for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

About Me

Ohmummymia

I'm a proud Mom of one little boy. He is a cheeky toddler with huge personality. I'm a founder of this blog- a place where every Mom can feel special. We like to talk about real life, tips, tricks, parenting advice and traveling. I'm obsessed with my family's health and dairy and gluten free food.

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