The Life and Adventures of Maj. Roger Sherman Potter eBook

“Faith of my father, sir,” he continued,
“but if the fleshy man would only stop his screaming,
and set to sing ‘Auld Lang Syne,’ or something
of that sort, it would be much more to my liking.
To your fashionable folks with your fashionable singing,
for all me: and let them who understand it pay
for it; to be honest with you, sir, (and I see you
are much given to this sort of singing,) I can make
no more of it than that the fleshy man you call the
tenor, and who you say is no scaly fellow, but a man
with whom several damsels have become enamored, is
outdoing the big man you call the basso, in telling
his troubles to the audience, who, I take it, care
not a whit about them, seeing that most of them are
keeping up a loud conversation on matters concerning
their neighbors, which is a proof of their resolution
not to let the bawling fellows upon the stage have
it all their own way. As to the moral of the representation,
I have no doubt it is good, as you say; but I hold,
that vice is better shut up in the closet than served
out for the amusement of the young. But lest
you say I am not a man of feeling, I can tell you
I pity the tall woman you call the prima donna; and
if she would accept a word of advice from me, I would
tell her to so square her example for the future,
that she may be prepared for Heaven when Death knocks
at the door, since she is a lady of so much beauty
that it would be a pity to see her leave this world
without redemption. And as I see the big, fat
chorus women are laughing in their skins at our ignorance
of what they say, I would have them take heed lest
they fall into the snare you describe as being set
for the square shouldered damsels you call the atrato.”
“Contralto!” interrupted Mr. Tickler.
“Well, have it contralto, then; the difference
is only in a word or two, which matters nothing now-a-days.
And as to the opera, I hold it best that we get home
and attend to matters concerning our journey, for
I see the two foreign gentlemen on the stage are for
having a fight between themselves; and as it would
not become me, as a military man, to stand by and
see any unfair play, or indeed, to have anything to
do with it, let us prove the strength of our understanding
by getting quietly away.” During this colloquy
between the general and Mr. Tickler, Glanmoregain had
been a quiet listener; but he was not a little amused
at the singular innocence of the man he was about
to entrust with the important office of overthrowing
a kingdom. And although he would have remained
to the end of the opera, which, so far as the principals
were concerned, was really being performed in a very
creditable manner, he accompanied the general to his
quarters at the St. Nicholas, where they, having made
such arrangements for the journey as will be recorded
in the following chapter, parted for the night.