Friday, April 13, 2007

The physicist goes on at some length about the cosmic forces involved inestablishing the roundness of things, and finally says that pi is just anexpression of the ratio of the diameter of a circle to its circumference.

"Well, sure," responds the mathematician, "but it's more convenient toexpress it as a number. 3.14159, say."

Replies the engineer, "Yep. Pi's about three."

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Fire in the room:

A physicist and engineer and a mathematician were sleeping in a hotel roomwhen a fire broke out in one corner of the room.

Only the engineer woke up he saw the fire, grabbed a bucket of water andthrew it on the fire and the fire went out, then he filled up the bucketagain and threw that bucketfull on the ashes as a safety factor, and hewent back to sleep.

A little later, another fire broke out in a different corner of the roomand only the physicist woke up. He went over measured the intensity of thefire, saw what material was burning and went over and carefully measuredout exactly 2/3 of a bucket of water and poured it on, putting out thefire perfectly; the physicist went back to sleep.

A little later another fire broke out in a different corner of the room.Only the mathematician woke up. He went over looked at the fire, he sawthat there was a bucket and he noticed that it had no holes in it; heturned on the faucet and saw that there was water available. He, thus,concluded that there was a solution to the fire problem and he went backto sleep.

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The Difference Joke

A sociologist was studying the differences between the ways in whichmathematicians and engineers think. He persuaded two colleagues to takepart in an experiment, telling them when to be at his lab. When theyarrived, he sent the engineer first into a test room with instructionsto boil water. Entering the room, the engineer found a stove, a sink, atable, and an empty put upside-down on the floor. He picked up the pot,took it to the sink, filled it with water, placed it on the stove,turned on the stove, and waited for the water to boil.

The sociologist next reset the room and sent in the mathematician, whodid exactly the same thing.

Next, the sociologist reset the room again and sent the engineer backin. The engineer looked around the room again, this time finding thepot sitting on the table, already full of water, and the stove alreadyon. He picked up the pot, transferred it to the stove, and waited forthe water to boil.

The sociologist reset the room once more, and sent the mathematicianback in. The mathematician surveyed the room, turned the stove off,emptied the pot down the sink, dropped the pot upside-down on the floor,and announced "I have now reduced this problem to the previous case."

......

Some months later, the same sociologist is still studying the same twocolleagues, and has cracked under the strain. One night, he kidnapsboth of them (along with a physicist who just happened to walk down thewrong hallway at the wrong time). He drives them all fifty miles outinto the desert to a disused bunker, where he locks them up securely,each in a separate cell out of sight and sound of the others, each witha plastic spoon and a plentiful supply of food, water, Sterno and otheressentials, all in cans, but with no can opener. A month or so later,after the hue and cry over the disappearances has died down, he comesback to check on their progress.

The engineer is long gone, having constructed a can-opener out of pockettrash, opened the cans with it, compounded a plastic explosive fromsugar, fat, Sterno and soap, fabricated a shaped charge using emptycans, blasted open the door of his cell, and escaped to somewhere faraway from the deranged sociologist.

The physicist has calculated the precise angle and velocity to throw thecans against a corner of her cell wall in order to break the tops openwithout spilling the contents, and is happily developing a new quantumtheory and a good pitching arm.

The mathematician's desiccated body lies half-sprawled against one wallof his cell, with all the cans, unopened, haphazardly piled against theopposite wall. Neatly scratched in the middle of his cell floor withthe edge of a can is the following text:

The physicist goes on at some length about the cosmic forces involved inestablishing the roundness of things, and finally says that pi is just anexpression of the ratio of the diameter of a circle to its circumference.

"Well, sure," responds the mathematician, "but it's more convenient toexpress it as a number. 3.14159, say."

Replies the engineer, "Yep. Pi's about three."

--------------------------

Fire in the room:

A physicist and engineer and a mathematician were sleeping in a hotel roomwhen a fire broke out in one corner of the room.

Only the engineer woke up he saw the fire, grabbed a bucket of water andthrew it on the fire and the fire went out, then he filled up the bucketagain and threw that bucketfull on the ashes as a safety factor, and hewent back to sleep.

A little later, another fire broke out in a different corner of the roomand only the physicist woke up. He went over measured the intensity of thefire, saw what material was burning and went over and carefully measuredout exactly 2/3 of a bucket of water and poured it on, putting out thefire perfectly; the physicist went back to sleep.

A little later another fire broke out in a different corner of the room.Only the mathematician woke up. He went over looked at the fire, he sawthat there was a bucket and he noticed that it had no holes in it; heturned on the faucet and saw that there was water available. He, thus,concluded that there was a solution to the fire problem and he went backto sleep.

--------------------------

The Difference Joke

A sociologist was studying the differences between the ways in whichmathematicians and engineers think. He persuaded two colleagues to takepart in an experiment, telling them when to be at his lab. When theyarrived, he sent the engineer first into a test room with instructionsto boil water. Entering the room, the engineer found a stove, a sink, atable, and an empty put upside-down on the floor. He picked up the pot,took it to the sink, filled it with water, placed it on the stove,turned on the stove, and waited for the water to boil.

The sociologist next reset the room and sent in the mathematician, whodid exactly the same thing.

Next, the sociologist reset the room again and sent the engineer backin. The engineer looked around the room again, this time finding thepot sitting on the table, already full of water, and the stove alreadyon. He picked up the pot, transferred it to the stove, and waited forthe water to boil.

The sociologist reset the room once more, and sent the mathematicianback in. The mathematician surveyed the room, turned the stove off,emptied the pot down the sink, dropped the pot upside-down on the floor,and announced "I have now reduced this problem to the previous case."

......

Some months later, the same sociologist is still studying the same twocolleagues, and has cracked under the strain. One night, he kidnapsboth of them (along with a physicist who just happened to walk down thewrong hallway at the wrong time). He drives them all fifty miles outinto the desert to a disused bunker, where he locks them up securely,each in a separate cell out of sight and sound of the others, each witha plastic spoon and a plentiful supply of food, water, Sterno and otheressentials, all in cans, but with no can opener. A month or so later,after the hue and cry over the disappearances has died down, he comesback to check on their progress.

The engineer is long gone, having constructed a can-opener out of pockettrash, opened the cans with it, compounded a plastic explosive fromsugar, fat, Sterno and soap, fabricated a shaped charge using emptycans, blasted open the door of his cell, and escaped to somewhere faraway from the deranged sociologist.

The physicist has calculated the precise angle and velocity to throw thecans against a corner of her cell wall in order to break the tops openwithout spilling the contents, and is happily developing a new quantumtheory and a good pitching arm.

The mathematician's desiccated body lies half-sprawled against one wallof his cell, with all the cans, unopened, haphazardly piled against theopposite wall. Neatly scratched in the middle of his cell floor withthe edge of a can is the following text: