3 Things You Can Learn from Satisfied Couples’ Bedtime Routines

According to the ancient art of Feng Shui, the three most important areas in the home are the front entry (or foyer), the kitchen and the master bedroom. At first wash it can sound a little woo-woo, but don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.

My partner and I recently moved into a new apartment. It’s sunny, well-appointed and boasts exquisite views of Table Mountain. What better place to sit at my desk and work, right? Wrong. I felt scattered and restless and spent all my time at a local coffee shop instead.

After doing some basic Feng Shui research, we moved the furniture around, hung the mirror on a different wall and flipped the rug. In an instant, the energy shifted. Suddenly the writing just flowed.

All of that to drive home the point that, if you’re not sleeping well, it could be your bed is incorrectly placed. However, it could just as easily be that your partner is eating cookies in bed while watching Friends reruns on Netflix. Let’s find out.

The Importance of Sleep

Your mom was right: sleep is extremely important. Without it, your health will quickly deteriorate. Studies have linked sleep deprivation to heart disease, weight gain, type two diabetes and various other worrying conditions.

Even without the worst-case scenarios, a sleepless night can still feel like the worst thing in the world. No matter how much coffee you drink, you can’t seem to wake up. You’re tired, you’re irritable and you can just forget about focusing on work.

A Good Night’s Sleep Begins Before You Go to Sleep

Hitting the sack after a particularly tough day is an indescribably delicious feeling. Finally, you’re able to let go of the stress and tension and fall into a peaceful slumber. But what if you don’t sleep alone?

Does sharing a bed impact our sleep, and more importantly, does it affect our relationships? Researchers surveyed bed sharing couples to find out and made some interesting discoveries.

It turns out the bedroom is definitely the place to reinvigorate your relationship, but not in the way you think. (Although, it could lead to that.) So, what can we learn from these happy, well rested couples?

1. Ditch the Tech and Talk

Not surprisingly, more than half of satisfied couples said they always or often talk with their partner last thing in bed. Conversely, those who admitted to being unhappy in their relationship were more likely to have their last communication be online, rather than with the person next to them.

By making your bedroom a technology-free zone, you stand a much better chance of improving both your relationship and your sleep. The blue light emanating from your device of choice suppresses melatonin, while the device itself acts as a barrier between you and your spouse.

2. Don’t Eat in Bed

We all know it’s bad to eat right before bedtime, which means it’s even worse to eat while in bed. Satisfied couples agree. More than half of those polled admitted to having a ‘no food or drinks in bed’ rule.

By applying the Zen approach to our everyday lives, we’re able to give every activity the attention it deserves.

Another way of looking at it is to use the space you’re in the way that it’s intended. When life crosses over, confusion reigns. If you want to watch TV, go to the living room. If you’re hungry, go to the kitchen.

Being in bed is a time for closeness, gentle communication and rest. Use it as such, and you’ll more than likely enjoy some great cuddles and convo and have a good night’s sleep.

3. Never Go to Sleep Angry

Arguments are part and parcel of being in a relationship, it’s how you deal with them that matters. One rule satisfied couples stick to it to never go to sleep angry. Science backs them on this.

One study found that couples who go to bed without resolving their differences suffer poor sleep and increase their risk of life-threatening illnesses. Along with missing out on that much needed shut eye, there’s residual stress to deal with the following day.

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