Man City striker Mario Balotelli finally scored his first league goal this week against Wigan, and the wacky Clown Prince of the EPL decided to celebrate with a new tattoo. This alone wouldn't be noteworthy, except that the tattoo is on his chest and reads:

I am the punishment of God.
If you had not committed great sins,
God would not have sent a punishment
Like me upon you.

That's a Genghis Khan quotation about revenge, and we have no idea what Wigan did to deserve this other than be a perennial Premiership also-ran.