being super sick is awesome*

*sarcasm sign

it's been coming for a long time, i suppose, and can partly be explained by my moods of late and also ~the sitch i found myself in a few weeks go (the one with the stirrups and the biopsy, in case you're not on the same page as me), but i've been pretty bloody poorly. oh, i know, i'm always sick. true. bloody true. and every time i am, it's "the worst cold i've had in a while", but this one truly was. i'd been low and tired for the best part of the last month - generally not my self, struggled for a smile, gumpier and nastier than normal, and that's all a fair sign something's up. i'd put it down to boredom initially - with work, with london, with this blog. then i had a colposcopy and freaked the hell out that something that was really wrong. then i wrote about how i was feeling, how i had been feeling, about things that were on my mind and as if by magic, a massive weight lifted from my shoulders.

and then i got sick. properly sick. i don't help myself by being perpetually busy during the week. i'm ~always out after work, and yet of a weekend...netflix bingeing. makes no sense, but i like it. kinda. i mean, while i'm dressed and already out, i may as well stay out, right? so i could feel a hint of the sniffles and the glands start to swell, but i hate to let people down, so my after-school plans stick. while i was ~getting sick, i still managed a gig, taco tuesday, a going away party, a comedy night, eat out with the theatre crowd, anddesign a t-shirt. i mean... what? that's madness.

so yeah, last week was rough. i made it to work the whole week until thursday, when i made it in just to turn around at lunch time after being pretty ~physically sick after one particularly horrible coughing fit, and stayed home and worked for the rest of the day and friday. friday morning i could barely lift my head off my pillow, and yet ~somehow i managed to pull together the most ridiculous spreadsheet known to man because - get this, the client wanted it. fair point! all i had in the house was bread and soups and savse smoothies, and so with the 5 and 2 a day i was getting from them and the mmm delicious buttery and honey-ey goodness that was my four slices of toast for lunch, i was sorted. there was no reason to leave the house. ever again.
once i'd managed to pull this hideous report and reply to all my emails, i promtly put myself back to bed with vitamin c slathered all over my peeling face, and resumed watching all the netflix i could. as a side note - check out all the telly i've watched since thursday: i finished orange is the new black (season two again). finished the returned. started - and subsequently finished, orphan black (recommend!). watched fast 6 (again). started brooklyn 99 (again). watched the whole of eurovision. caught up on bgt and dinner dates (oh, i know). watched a show about a food blogger that not once mentioned she was a food blogger, but was like...easy to put on and tune out, which is exactly the calibre of telly i was looking for this weekend.

bed, netflix and bread was like heaven on my exhausted and sore body, except honey on toast tires pretty quickly, and with a three-day weekend ahead of me, i needed proper sustenance. i legit made it to the shops on saturday, just as it started to rain. because i have great timing, if nothing else. i picked up luxury snacks for eurovision, nutritious food for ultimate health rejuvenation, and then returned to bed. with a cuppa and some excellent brunch bagels. because if nothing else, being sick is totally a reason to comfort eat all the bacon, am i right?

come sunday though, i was fighting cabin fever hard. i'd essentially not left the house since thursday afternoon - except to head to tesco at the end of my street, and i hadn't used my voice in actual days because my flatmate was away. i was bored, grouchy but still sooooo lethargic. i'd made loose plans to see lis while she was in town, but after having to change my clothes three times before managing to leave the house thanks to fever sweats and unreasonable weather, there was just no chance i was making it to her in central london before she headed home again. no chance. i was moments away from bursting into tears thanks to the ridiculousness of having to change so many times, but instead put my shoes on and just walked - albeit slowly, toward the train station.
the whole time i was still absolutely talking myself into do anything at all, preferring to be back in bed where it was warm and there were pillows and fruit smoothies. nevertheless i carried on because i get fomo - or more, fear of having nothing cool to do when i have three days off. and truly - no matter how busy i am during the week, i do ~like having my weekends to relax. not imposed relaxation though, that's not ok. and i was bored and restless and had to do ~something. i grabbed my book, and took off for greenwich, thinking it would be a nice afternoon to sit in the shade and read.

on the walk there, i was suckered into the entirely too-busy market because of all the delicious scents that i was finally able to smell at long last, and ended up in a line for one of my food bucket-list items, the ramen burger. i had heard stories. friends had eaten them in new york. the time out had reviewed them. they were a fabled street-feast-food, and here it was being cooked in front of me. i watched them being prepared by the cooks at 'pimp your ramen' in the market, and i thought... sod it; it's now or never. and so it was. and... it was weird! i expected the ramen to be ~crunchy, but it was more chewable. almost rubbery, but not in a bad way. definitely not like a bread, but not crispy like uncooked noodles as i was expecting. the delicious pulled pork juices soaked into the ramen too, giving the 'buns' the smoky flavours of the meat and fire of the sriracha sauce, complimented perfectly with the cucumber coleslaw...omy, i want it again now.

i ate it in the shade of a big tree in the park, sipping on jasberry green tea, and admiring the families out to play on a truly overcast and bipolar spring day. i lasted probably an hour before i got fed up of being cold - again - washed my greasy hands, and headed home. again. being out of bed for what felt like an eternity on sunday (but was was really no more than.. three hours) made me really appreciate it's clean-sheeted comfort when i climbed back in with another pot of soup and crusty bread again that night. if chicken soup is good for the soul, then comfy pillows are definitely great for the physical.

monday had me feeling a lot better, and tuesday better still. i still feel like crap, but there's certainly something in the advice the docs give you when you waste their time with head colds and flus, because fluids, food and plenty of bed rest certainly do wonders to putting your wrongs to right. slowly, but surely.