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Sunday morning, my little Meggie Darn. Sorry. My big girl Megan (I’ve got to get a grip on that) did one of the most grown up things I’ve ever seen her do, and that’s really saying something, since she recently cleaned up cat barf without being asked. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s doing more and more grown-up things as she gets perilously close to the voting age – but there’s still something surprising about watching it happen to someone you bathed in your kitchen sink. She, Pato and Ken rode down to Queens Park, lined up with the other 400 participants, and left on the trip of a lifetime.

They’re riding 600km, Toronto to Montreal, to raise money for the Toronto People with Aids Foundation, and I’m so proud I could bust. My wee Megaboo Megan has risen to this challenge beautifully, and I know that the other parents will understand when I say that it’s really, really reassuring to see one of your children do something big, grand and generous. Not just because it’s obviously good to do something big, grand and generous, but because parenting is such a total crap shoot. It’s not like there’s any sort of guarantees out there about how kids will turn out. There are some very bad people out there who had some great parents (and the other way around) and good parents know that all you do when you parent well is increase the chance that the person you’re making will be good. It’s like a soufflé or something. You can really know what you’re doing and the thing could still totally suck for no other reason that it’s a Tuesday and the moon is full and somewhere the wind blew a little bit funny over the whiskers of an old rat with a limp.

That’s the terrible trio. Patricio, Ken and Megan, holding a blanket. (Yes. I made them hold a blanket in public in front of all the other riders. No. I don’t think that’s a problem. They’re lucky. It’s a nice blanket.)

Meg’s not a finished person yet, (I like to think most people aren’t. It’s encouraging.) but I think that doing something like this so young is a compelling thing to have on your permanent record. For the rest of her life she’ll have to reconcile anything else she’d like to do against the fact that she did this, and I think it will raise the bar.

I watched them take off yesterday and although I’m not anything resembling a weepy person, there was something about it. Meg for doing it, her boyfriend Pato for being a good sport about going with her and our lovely Ken for being a good role model and encouraging them to do it with him this year. They all rode 112km yesterday (largely in the rain) and another 125 today. For anybody as bad with Kilometres as I am miles, that’s about 150 miles total. I just heard from her. She’s super tired, she’s working hard, she has 400 kilometres to go… and she’s pretty darned happy. She wanted to make sure that I told you all that tomorrow night, when she, Ken and Pato are all presented with their Gold Jerseys for being top fundraisers (and Meg and Pato are the youngest in the ride) that she’ll be feeling grateful to all of you for giving her the moment… as will I.

I bet that the People With Aids Foundation doesn’t think you suck either. Thanks again for helping.

(Ps. If you’re interested, the hashtag for following on twitter is #bikerally09. I wish Megan twittered, just so I would know how she was all the time. Fighting the urge to call her cell continuously is taking a lot of energy. )

Yes, parenting is a crap-shoot, and you’ve done very well in the game!!! Way to go Megan and Pato and Ken, and I’ll be wanting to see those special jerseys. I must admit to a wee tear as I read your post. 🙂 Even seeing someone else’s child growing up so beautifully can make me weepy. Way to go Megan and way to go Stephanie!

Wowee!! This is just the coolest darn thing ever. Fabulous fabulous fabulous. I think they are all just the cutest as well…I can see why you’re having a hard time calling her ‘Megan’ and not ‘Megaboo’. 🙂
Give yourself a pat on the back, Steph. You’ve raised a great kid!

“She wanted to make sure that I told you all …..that she’ll be feeling grateful to….”
Yeah, you don’t eggzackly suck in the role model, mother, social conscience and support department either, Hon. My (non-creepy stranger-)love to you all.

I did a pathetic 30Km ride last summer as a fund raiser and I was SO proud… I can’t even imagine how proud you must be as a Mom! Well done to all of you!! 600KM is definitely something worth being proud about!

Way to go Meg, Pato and Ken. And way to go Stephanie and Joe for having raised such a caring young person-who is growing into an awesome grown up person. I wish them fair weather and that the wind be only at their backs for the rest of the ride. (Thanks for the conversion of kilometers to miles too.)

I am sure Ken and the whole ride organization will take excellent care of Megan and Pato but I also know that you and your family will worry about them until they are home! Good for them. Good for you. The world needs more like you.

Two thumbs up for your daughter, Stephanie. (And of course, for Pato and Ken too. Wishing them good weather and safety.)
Great job.
I can’t wait to see what kind of person my kid turns out to be like. There’s times I think (even though he’s three) that he doesn’t stand a chance (typically, it’s when he hasn’t had a nap and is demanding oreo ice cream for dinner…but anyways) then there’s those times when he’s completely wonderful.

They will always be our little ones and we will worry. Congratulations to Megan and to her Mom for raising such a great kid!
Mine is leaving on his first big road trip in a couple of weeks and I keep reminding myself that when I was his age I was already MARRIED and going wherever I wanted.
He’s grown up. He’s grown up. He’s grown up. But, I still worry — just a little bit.
Sending good wishes Megan’s way and yours!

As a mom I can relate to the feeling of being so proud you could bust yet fighting the urge to clamp them to your chest and never ever ever let go.
Well done, Steph.
And congrats to Megan, Pato and Ken!

Good for them! And you do get credit, you know, for raising such a great child!
I like the idea that no one is really finished. Gives me hope, which I need lately because of all the crazies I run across in person or in the news.

What dear souls. That is such an amazing feat. I know the feeling of pride I had last year when my wee one at age 17 completed a marathon. I about burst out of my skin with pride. Even today I well up when I think how wonderful the youth of today is. You make sure to tell Meg and Pato how proud we all are of them (and Ken, too!). See you at SS!

Steph,
My brother David lived with AIDS for almost 15 years. He finally lost his battle and last September. While he wasn’t Canadian (we are American) I can tell you that it means the world to me that you, Megan and Pato are riding and raising money for the cause. A lot of folks have forgotten that AIDS is still taking lives…. A LOT of them still, and every single penny will help fight this disease and hopefully one day will contribute towards finding a cure!
I want to extend a personal thank you for this ride and raising money for this cause. Its much needed and much appreciated.
I only hope that my 2 sons have such a giving and adventurous spirit when they are older and able to be activists!

I’m so proud of all of them. I nearly choked on my dinner when I read how many kilometers they’re riding! The biggest charity ride around here is the MS 150 from Houston to Austin, about 241 kms, and they’re doing 2 and a half of them.
I am very very impressed. Go Megan, Ken and Pato!

this it what really, really counts and makes the crap from two days ago easy to forget….:o).
Congratulations to you, Joe and your whole family…..you all can be proud…of your kids, your family, family of the heart and yourself……you all make a great team.

Well I think that the wind blew on the wiskers of a rat with a limp at my adress today. Your post gives me hope for my 15 year old daughter. Who currently is in a funk about things she can’t change and firmly believes that the rest of the family should feel her pain.

Cheers for the trio! Cheers for the cozy-looking blanket!
Can I just say that parenting scares me half to death? I mean, I’m fairly certain that at some point I will have that job, but wow, “with great power comes great responsibility” comes to mind.
I’d say you’ve wielded your power well.

Congratulations to you and Joe for the wonderful job parenting! Kudos to Meg, Pato, and Ken for this wonderful and generous thing they are doing!! I am a teacher of teenagers. I love them, but it is a rare and wonderful pair of teens who would take this on. They give one renewed hope for the future, which is always a good thing.
Thanks for sharing.

I’d say you’ve done a good job parenting. While I don’t have children myself, I’ve watched friends and family raise their children. As you said there is no guarantees… you have to trust that they turn out well. Again, I’d say, from your stories, that your’s have. I’m glad form them that Megan, Pato and Ken all get gold shirts for their efforts.

Congratulations! What a great parenting story to share.
Just yesterday my 13 year-old daughter (on a trip with her great aunt) said “Thank you for teaching me to help out. The people here really love me for it!”

Dear Bikers,
Wow! Congrats, and may the wind be at your backs the entire ride. Have a great journey…Makes me want to dust off my bike seat and hit the road, well let me finish this next row of knitting…..and then I have a baby hat & booties to complete…yeah then I’ll be off…seriously am very impressed with this commitment, love the reminder of just how much good is being done in the world right now….(and the km/mile conversion,thanks)Peace

I was so amazed when I first read that she was taking this on and now reading about you sending her off has renewed that feeling of awe. I just completed one of the MS Bike Tours this weekend and I can guarantee she is going to be filled with an immense sense of accomplishment for both the physical feat of the ride itself and for being a part of something so much bigger than herself.

a shout of laughter here–I preached Sunday morning, and my opening line was “Having kids is a crapshoot”. My, I had their attention. It must be the moon, because the three women I rode to the retreat with hit on almost every theme in the sermon, too. It is a chance we take, they do things that we don’t expect, different and often better than we expected.
counting down to Sock Summit!

How wonderful! I must admit in my egocentric way, however, that I am just as focused on your cat barf comment. That is because it gives me hope that my kids might clean up dog barf unasked when they get to Meg’s age! Please keep updating your amazing blog…it gives many of us a few laughs, a chance to empathize with a fellow knitter and parent, and a sense of hope.

Bravo to Megan (and Pato and Ken)! Isn’t it wonderful to see how lovely our children are turning out in spite of some of the silly things we might have done during their formative years? Congrats Steph – you done good!
PS The blanket looks yummy but I’m still not sure about the placement of the black…can’t wait to see it finished. 🙂

Wow! Mazel tov to them all.
Having looked at a map when I suggested to hubby that we take a short jaunt to Montreal or Quebec (where I was on my high school senior class trip – don’t ask) when we had an unexpected vacation window, and having then realized how much closer Toronto was – well, I can appreciate the distance. And that was for a car trip from central Ohio, not on a bicycle.
Kudos to the entire trio.

Wait – I just can’t get past the fact that she cleaned up cat barf without being asked. How DID you teach that? That has to be one of the ten official signs on the “good job on your parenting skills” list. Surely.
(Well, and the whole bike ride to raise money for a good cause – that’s good, too…..)

As a mother of teens myself, I know that there are no words to express the sheer pride and joy that you feel when your kid does something amazing for people they don’t know. My son organized and ran a benefit waterski tournament to benefit breast cancer research. Good job with the kidlet!

From one mother of a Meggie (she hates being called that), I mean, Megan, to another, I salute you for a job well done! My Meg is turning 25 years old this year and is the founder of a non-profit organiztion (http://www.mommymoon.org/). I couldn’t be prouder!
I was told by a friend years ago (when I was in the middle of 12 years of single parenting) that parenting should be considered successful if both the parents and the children come out of it in one piece.

Way to go! Keep it up! 🙂
You must be so proud, Stephanie! Isn’t it wonderful when the kids that we’ve bullied out of bed, sent to school when they’d rather be home, and loved to pieces turn out to be wonderful, caring people?
Best wishes!

“I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s doing more and more grown-up things. . .but there’s still something surprising about watching it happen to someone you bathed in your kitchen sink.”
I was thinking similar thoughts about my 13-year-old son as he started his chores this morning. Not only is he being helpful without complaining, he is also starting to do things without being asked (won’t clean up the cat barf, though). I can’t help but feel a little bit of pride.
Kudos to you and your husband for being awesome parents. And congrats to Megan and friends – what an accomplishment!

Congradulations! I believe you are a good mom ‘cuz you are a good person. I dedicate the merrit of my meditation today to you. I would like you to know that your blog and your books have and are encouraging me to be a better person. Thank you.
Lots of Love and Hugs.

Gee I am sitting here crying with pride for Meg and the person that she is and who she will become. Way to go Steph on raising them right.
Go have a beer in celebration over that wonderful daughter of yours!!

That’s starting early with the good deeds, caring for others, understanding the grand scheme of things, karma,…
…but she’ll always be your baby. (Just ask any mother) good job letting her grow up.
Thank you for sharing.

What wonderful women you raised/are raising. If more young people took on causes like yours has, what a different world we might inhabit.
Sometimes being a mother is just the best thing ever, isn’t it?

Hooowee, I’m with you, Mama. I’ve got a son the same age hopping off to college in a month. When you see them do stuff like this you realize maybe they’ve got it together enough that they WILL be able to take care of themselves someday, and they are good people besides. My son regularly saves the world, but can’t remember his shoes, his jacket… anything that could get left somewhere, does. So I have doubts….. But the cat barf is impressive. I think your Megan is gonna be ok!

See what good parents you and Joe have been ! A beautiful young woman -outside and ,more importantly inside, has been raised by you . She will make you proud all her life. At times we all worry that despite our best efforts and influences a child may pick the wrong path. Worry no more-she is even making me proud and I have never even met her outside of your blog.
I was a little shocked when my teenagers suddenly didn’t have to be nagged out of bed,nagged to finish chores,nagged to get jobs,nagged to do their schoolwork. We stood back , looked at each other and said,”Wow, look what happens when you blink”.

Sometimes on these long rides, they have massage therapists available. If you have the option, tell her to go to one! It’s SO worth it.
A massage therapist got me through my first Bicycle Ride Across Georgia (BRAG) years ago. They really help liven up tired legs!

she….she…..she cleaned up cat barf without being asked?! whoa. Impressive. My son (age 21), when asked to do nearly anything will likely respond with “isn’t that something you can do yourself?” (I didn’t teach him that….he’s recently gotten a job as a coach and he now thinks I need coaching.) Although to his credit he bought me a soda at a movie last night and folded/put away neatly the towels that were in the dryer. You’re doing an awesome job with your kidlets.

Your Meg is wonderful. As are her friends and family. You deserve to be very proud.
I recently had a problem similar to yours on my blog. My husband works for a public transportation company that has it’s union contract up for renewal. I posted a bit of info, not much on my blog for my family and friends. The tirade from the comments from some “anoymous” person were hurtful, personal, and just plain untrue. I agonized over them and even changed my blog for a bit. He finally has agreed to quit commenting on my blog and I’m so grateful. There are family members that could trace him if I requested but I didn’t want to give him power. So we all ignored him but it didn’t stop until I told him that he would be found.
I don’t know what the answer is. We can only hold our friends in our hearts and know that they know the real truth about us. I hated to do anything because I felt it gave that guy power. It turned out he was quite a coward when he thought he’d be found. Your person sounds mentally ill. That is so scary. If there is anything I can do to help you or reassure you that you are just fine as you are, let me know.

Isn’t it wonderful when any little doubts you had about your children are washed away in one fell swoop by the amazing good deeds they do? Congrats to Meg, Pato, and Ken on their fundraising and bike riding! And wishing them muscles that are toned and not sore!!

She’s turning out great! When you next talk to Megan and she says she’s tired and sore, tell her not to worry – after about 400 kilometers she won’t even feel anything from her waist down. I did a 500 mile (800 kilometer) ride to raise money for a shelter for abused and runaway kids. It was an awesome experience. It felt good to be able to accomplish more than I had ever thought I could and it felt even better knowing that some troubled teens knew that people really did care.

Great Family to ride for such a worthy cause and come up shinning..Be proud..let the buttons pop, Megan will be on her own before you know..then she a grown up..rough at first but you’ll soon let go..
My daughter is an Quilt Artist, she became the brunt of such slanderous tirate as you just received..not once but twice..she change all her web sites..she also was so upset..
Steph hang in there you have the Knitting comunity in your court.
Pat Dixon

To Meg: VERY cool. Very cool indeed.
To Stephanie: Don’t know if I’ll ever have kids, but you sure are helping me realize that if I decide to it just might be ok. SCARY AS HELL, but ok. It really is possible to produce a clever and kind-hearted individual, and gorgeous to boot. Admirably done.

What a lovely post. Love the souffle analogy…and you know, usually, even if the souffle doesn’t look promising on the outside, once you get to the inside, it still tastes pretty good, as long as you put good stuff in it!

Congratulations to Pato’s parents, Ken’s, and to you and Joe. It is THE sweetest feeling to see your kid putting themselves out there in order to do good unto others. And to Pato, Ken, and Meg–well done! Bravo!

So glad to see that the yarn goddess is back in the driver’s seat. After the horriblness of yesterday’s blog, I was thrilled to see such a happy report about the Great Ride. I am the mother of a 15 and half year old and marvel and cry at how fast it all goes by. It’s wonderful that your kid has taken on a big commitment and followed through. Wonder how that happened?
Eve from Carlisle.

My mother-in-law raised seven sons. People ask her “What did you do? They all turned out so well.” She always says that she got lucky.
I’m glad she could pass this message along to me because it also means that one shouldn’t feel too bad when things don’t go right.
Good luck Megan, Pato and Ken. I hope the rest of the right is just as fun!

Those are 3 really not-sucky people there – and even more admirable that Meg and Pato should be so dedicated knowing they are the youngest in the group! (There was a while where I was always the youngest in the room in much of my volunteer work, and after a while it stops being cute). Yay for them for riding, uh, a whole lot of kilometres.

I didn’t comment to the last post, because I was just wordless, and then when I had words, they didn’t seem right. This post though, is the type that calls for recognition because if even half the world were as willing to go out and DO something for others as you and yours are, the world would be a significantly better place. thanks for being you, and for showing your daughters that they can do something too. Thank them for listening/being observant for me. rock on.

me again… just clicked on the link to find out more and i see on the route map that meg and pato get to visit some of my favourite towns…(plus unbeknownst to me, they passed right by my front door..ok, a little south of my front door!). kingston-so much fun in the summer time. montreal-an exciting place to be anytime! what an “excellent adventure”. but the teacher in me hopes that someone is doing a head-count every morning, break and at night! i hope you post some of their pics for us to see when they return. best of luck kids!

You are so right about the crap shoot, wish that I had known about the rat with the limp tho..a person could maybe have avoided that..LOL
My wonderful daughter and her husband made my hubby and I proud grandparents 2 weeks ago today..I have been in Winnipeg helping her out since last Tuesday and could never have known how “huge” the feeling could be for this wee baby boy. I have knitted him 5 sweaters, am on the 6th now, and have sewedmany things for him as well. So if ‘stitches’ will keep him safe, that is all I can ask for.
Good Luck to Megan, Pato and Ken..it was a pleasure to contribute.

I think Megan is great for doing that, and I am going to brag on my dd age 14 too. She just donated 12 inches of her hair to Lock of Love. Not a physical challenge like your dd, but a difficult one nonetheless. She had gorgeous long thick hair that she was really proud of and it is going to make someone else really happy.

Well, yesterday’s blog brought tears to my eyes for all the wrong reasons. And, today’s brings tears for all the right reasons. So proud of you and Meg et al for making me weepy. I can imagine what it felt like to see her ride off for days….could you have tied a skein of wool to her….having kids who were 3 yesterday and 23 today!

It always gives me a warm fuzzy feeling to see young people do something so selfless. Last summer, my nephew did a Bike and Build trip, where he and a group of people rode their bikes from Florida (I think?) to San Francisco, stopping along the way to work on Habitat for Humanity projects. I wish I’d had that sort of stamina and dedication when I was young!

awesome Meg! Steph, why is it again,that we shouldnt refer to them with endearments ? when is it exactly, that we should stop calling them by their child hood nic names,? ME>BEBO….still at 47 lol I suppose I will stop calling Pica, “Pica”-when she stops signing it in my mothers day cards .hoping not ever lol

I’d been noticing a few comments about the ride on Twitter and looking forward to photos. This is all terribly exciting! And what a good cause! Congratulations to your daughter, you must be very proud 😀

Congratulations on the gold jerseys Megan and Pato and Ken! Wonderful and meaningful accomplishment. Mom has every right to be proud. Definitely a bragging rights moment. And Joe deserves a pat on the back too. See you next week, Alice

What a fantastic thing to do! You’re obviously just as proud of her as you should be. It’ll be great for Megan, too, to remember just how good this sort of thing makes you feel. Who needs drugs and money and fame?

I haven’t visited your blog in a while, but I scrolled down just far enough to read your previous post about the abusive woman. You may have already heard all this, but I’ll do it again. Have you tried contacting this woman’s ISP and reporting this abuse? I’ve never had to do it myself, but I’m told there’s a good chance the ISP will stop providing her with a service if what she’s doing is considered harassement. Please consider doing this. Imagine if she re-directs her vitriol to some other unsuspecting person when she’s done with you.
Eventually even crazy people have to find getting a new ISP a pain in the butt. Until then, block her out, block her e-mails. Don’t read them – her rantings are nothing to do with you, and everything to do with her.
I know you don’t want to respond to this woman in any way, but another tact suggested to me by an IT consultant is to have a sub-section of your blog dedicated to this woman’s abusive comments, e-mails etc. You put all her rantings in there, with her name, website, blog, e-mail address listed, and you will be astonished at how many of your dedicated fellow knitters respond in kind directly to her. With any luck she’ll be flamed into submission by your online friends (or someone will get her the help she needs). I’m guessing you probably won’t go for this idea and I don’t blame you – I’m an “ignore it and it will go away” kind of person. But just thinking about doing it might make you feel better!
In any regard, keep these two things in mind: 1. you are lovely and loved, and 2. This woman’s rantings are not actually about you in any way, they are all about her and whatever psychological problems she has. I bet her mind went super-nova reading the thousands of supporting commments to your previous post. In fact, it just may have done the job.

Congratulations!!!! What a cool thing to be able to do. Nothing beats the feeling you get from being able to do something that you know will matter and make a difference for another person. You are so right about raising kids being a crap shoot. I know people who have great kids that don’t deserve them, and people who have not so great kids that definitely deserve better. You never know how the little buggers will turn out! I really got a kick from your statement about Meg not finished being a person yet. I’m constantly telling my son “We are all works in progress.” I believe this wholeheartedly. I also tell that to my son’s friends when they call for advice. I find it both humbling and reassuring that we get to wake up each and every morning and decide all over again what kind of person we want to be, and what road it is that we want to follow. How cool is that! Congratulations to you all!!!!

What a great kid! adding my congrats to all. you love them, you raise them -and then you let them try their wings. and that, dear lady, is the hardest part of parenthood. You and Joe done good – and continue to do good. Love you all.
Lea

Stephanie,
I love your blog! Your ideas impress me, challengw me, entertain me, educatw me and give me something to enjoy in every entry. I love your books and hope you publish many more. I love hearing about your family and the ways you handle your challenges.
I am a Canadian born American citizen (whatever that has to do with anyrthing), and I guess what I’m trying to say is “Don’t let the turkeys get you down!”
From Fran

Stephanie,
I love your blog! Your ideas impress me, challengw me, entertain me, educatw me and give me something to enjoy in every entry. I love your books and hope you publish many more. I love hearing about your family and the ways you handle your challenges.
I am a Canadian born American citizen (whatever that has to do with anything), and I guess what I’m trying to say is, “Don’t let the turkeys get you down”!
Keep up your good work!
From Fran

As a mother and a grandmother, I can definitely relate. Of four daughters, I have watched two daughter’s graduate with a BA and one from Basic Training and Combat Medic training. I have been around for the births of five grandchildren [three male—they ARE male—boys ARE different]and next week am going to my eldest grand-daughter’s graduation from Basic Training. After graduation from High School, she’ll have advanced training in the Medical Corps and then to the University for pre-vet, the Reserves and ROTC.
Steph…a mother/grandmother just sits around and thinks – “Where the h_ll did all the time gone?” And, “I’d better get knitting!”

Hoorah for Megan, Pato, And Ken! Fabulous Young People!
And a beer for Stephanie and Joe for raising three amazing young women! (‘RENTS RULE!)
****************************
My only daughter is in Jamaica right now working for the civil rights of gay people as we speak. (This is her Doctoral work). Jamaica is a country where the heads of their Gov’t regularly speak out AGAINST Gays and Lesbians. Every day folk are threatened, beaten and sometimes killed just for the suspicion of being homosexual. And the lack of medical care and treatment of AIDS is due to the an enormous fear of being outed.
Recently my daughter had an experience where she and some of her friends were being harrassed at the beach. This gang of young men wanted to ‘get with’ these women. They encircled the group of women and made catcalls (calling them Lesbians), and threats. My daughter held up her hand with her wedding ring…and stated that she was married. It was only by hand of Providence that they were spared any real harm, and these young men decided to go elsewhere.
********************************
So it is a small world, and what we do, really CAN affect the day-to-day workings of people in far away places! BTW Our Daughters so RULE!
Stephanie… I am grateful to your daughter’s contribution to Aids work! Maybe one day it will trickle down to my Sarah’s work with Gay Folk.
Please keep Sarah in your thoughts and prayers, as what she is doing has had it’s risks.
With tears of gratitude!

Remember your own Mother ever saying, “Just wait till you have kids!!!”? Eventually that happens. When my Granddaughter Mallory was born my son was a cop. He handled critical and split second life changing decisions every day. But when it was time to take that baby home he looked at his beautiful wife (Melissa) and daughter and said, “we need to get some kind of book or something; we don’t know how to take care of a baby!” Don’t you just love it? I told him, “Son, you just stumble through, you’ll know in your heart what is right”. But it is a great feeling when you see them do something SO wonderful. I wish every day that I could go back to the younger years but that’s a done deal. Whether you believe in the Bible or not I always think about one passage. Bring up a child in the way they should go and they will not soon depart from it. How true! You are an excellent role model, how could she not be great?????

I’m still laughing about the rat with the limp.
It is a marvelously delicious feeling when you see your offspring demonstrating publicly a life lesson and you realize that holy cow, they must have been listening and watching!
Congratulations for this ray of blissful sunshine.

It’s an amazing thing that Megan, Pato and Ken are doing. I’ve done some of the charity runs and walks, but I’ve never come close to raising the sums of money that they worked so hard for. Fund raising is hard work, and they did a terrific job!

In 1993, the summer I was 18, I spent 6 weeks in Russia. I learned about Bread Lines. I saw poverty that I’d never seen before. I came home with only the clothes on my back, having given the rest away to new friends who need them more. I can say DEFINITELY I look back on this and measure all other things against this. It completely changed me…for the good. I’m so excited for Meg. She does indeed have a very bright future. And it thrills me that the next generations are doing amazing things for our world.

You are very lucky to have a man like Ken in your life. I am a firm believer that it is the obligation of every adult to set an example for young people and that we all need to parent at some level whether or not the children are ours. Cheers to Ken for some amazing parenting! Hmmm–I need to think up a word for people who are great parents but aren’t the actual parents.

Ya done good, Harlot. It’s hard not to tear up when you realize that all those years of dirt and tears and sweat have turned out actual, upstanding humans. It’s worth every minute of it. Yay, Meg & Pato & Ken!

Yes, our little babies growing up is a hard pill to swallow. Today is my oldest daughter’s 19th birthday. 19! When did that happen? She used to sit with needles and knit away and now I can hardly catch a moment with her because, as you know, the social life of a 19 year old young woman comes before all else! Nice job you’ve done with your kids. I can feel the pride in the words you write. Keep up the good work.

high fives all around!! and i’m sure megan’s sisters will do their own outstanding deeds.
my two are a few years older. dd has overcome a lot of obstacles, and i believe her achievements will increase. as for ds, i can only hope he finds a path to stability and eventual success. as you say, it’s a crapshoot. both were loved, both were offered guidance; in one case, it “took.”
btw, count me as an american who has no problem with a canadian (or anyone else) whose views don’t agree with mine 1000% percent of the time. i consider others’ perspectives helpful or at least interesting if they are reasoned and respectfully stated.
as for thecyberbully, if you’ve gotten no help from the isp, or if she’s changing isps, i suggest contacting your local police for advice. if she were threatening someone in the states, she’d be breaking federal communications laws. i suspect there are similar international laws, and when someone keeps saying hateful things and adding “i know where you live,” it’s not paranoid to get police advice.

Yays! You’re all probably bursting with pride; you, Joe, Pato’s parents, Ken’s loved ones… and the kids too! I’m sure they’ll be tired… but with huuuuuuge smiles on their faces knowing they’ve made a difference!
Way to go!
xo

I have to send “a great pat on the back” for being the fabulous parents. Mostly we just blame, but take some credit for allowing her the room to make these great choices. Way to go!! And to Megan, Pato and Ken, amazing job.
PS I could not find your private email and would like to send a quick note.
thanks for being such a great person-period!

I read this post sitting in a hotel room on a business trip as my 6 month sat in her stroller beside me alternating between slurping water from her sippy cup and then raspberrying it back out in little droplets all over my leg. Reading this gave me hope that someday, perhaps, she will graduate from messmaking and, well, messmaking into cause-promoting and general refinment. A mom can only hope.

What a tremendous pride you can have!
DH did the first AIDS ride from Minneapolis to Chicago 11 or 12 years ago, and considers it one of the special times of his life. He was one of 2 sixty-year-olds who made the ride. He has many wonderful stories – and sore muscles, cold rain, great food, and a huge personal accomplishment success were all a part of the ride for him.
I was so proud and really overwhelmed with emotion when I met him in Chicago! To see those hundreds of riders flowing past me in the warm sunshine, their new many-colored T-shirts confirming ride completion, and arms raised in triumph – it was a tearful moment for me, to be sure!

Congratulations! I think every parent shares your feeling of “OMG I can’t believe my baby did this.” And they always feel like your baby – even when they have babies of their own. It freaks my grands out (esp the oldest one) when I hug my daughter & say to them, “This is my baby.”

I hear you and agree. There is something so wonderful about seeing your “baby” succeed. Mine is 43 (can’t even believe it) has been a total joy her whole life. She went back to school and got her nursing degree (RN) two years ago. You have a lot to look forward to. Try to put that PERSON out of the picture. I enjoy your blog sooo much read it every day. Stay with us!

There, right there, is all the verification you need that you are a good person doing good things. What better gift could you give the world than a bright, caring, eager child?
Books, knitting, sock summits aside, it’s life and it’s all good.

In the fall of 2005, I ran the New York City marathon. 26.2 miles. 4:29:51. And you’re right – I spent the 2 days after panicking as I realized that if I did that, I no longer have any excuse to not do anything else. EVER. AGAIN.
My mom was pretty freaked, but then sent me a sweatshirt jacket. I hope I can pass her love and strength on to my son in the same way, just as you are doing with yours!

Wow! You must be the bursting from being so proud of your lovely daughter! So happy for you and the great things she is doing for people in need. Wishing her loads of luck and a safe ride from Indiana!!!!
P.S. Good job with the parenting thing. Can only hope my daughter does such a wonderful thing when she gets better!!!!

Wishing team Harlot all the best success on that ride (okay, they didn’t name themselves that, but I figured it said something about all your encouragement and cheering for them). I can’t imagine doing something that amazing, although it would not surprise me if one of my kids did.
Hope Meg’s recently healed hand survives the experience. And that they have good weather!
As for you and Joe, get the champagne ready!

Hi Stephanie, This may be an extreme suggestion, but I just said good-bye to my hubby as he takes on the Long Trail in Vermont – he will be gone for at least two weeks. I gave him a “Spot” before he left – it is a satellite tracking system (so should work where cell phones don’t) and I can check an on-line map to see where he is. Plus, he can send “I’m okay” e-mail messages to me now and then. Like I say, it might be a bit much for a bike ride, but if she is going to continue doing this kind of thing (or maybe others in your family can use it, too) it is a nice reassuring thing to have! I already feel better about him being on this hike – this at least is some form of comforting communication. Just an idea! And – Go Meg! (and Pato! and Ken!)

I think parenting is only partially a crapshoot. You and Joe obviously did good, and that’s not just down to chance.
I feel full of pride about this and I’ve never met Megan or Pato, they aren’t my children, and yet, it’s so wonderful to see them doing this.
AIDS is a terrible disease, and this is so appreciated. And whatever they choose to be involved in, doing something for others like this is such an important part of being a good human being.
Thanks Megan, Pato, and everyone for reminding me of the good out there.

Congrats to them! I was happy to donate to the cause. But you know what’s funny? For some reason I assumed this was a MOTORCYCLE trip!!! Not a bicycle trip. I was thinking “Wow – Steph is really handling her daughter being a cross country motorcycle rider really well”! Hopefully, riding the bike is a bit safer. Good luck to them!!!!!

Dear Stephanie,
What a wonderful daughter you have raised and I am glad she has a boyfriend who is equally wonderful!
Please pass on my regards and best wishes to them. I hope they are having a great time! My hat is off to them, both for their fantastic fundraising as well as for their courage and endurance!!!
Kind regards,
Bettina

Don’t call her cell – she’d have to take her hand off the handle bar to answer.
I’m very happy for you and Joe! As well for the three amigos! As the mother of a 24 year old who never claims credit for who she is as a person (therefore you are not also forced to claim blame!) but I believe that being around people who honestly care about other people can’t help but be a good influence on a young adult.
(yeah I know that last word hurt a little but she is a young adult!)
Will you be there for the finish?

To answer Bethany’s question–apparently, “Pato” is short for “Patricio”, though this is the first I’ve heard of it. I thought it was interesting when I learned that “Nacho” is short for “Ignacio”, and that many Spanish speakers are unaware of the snack of that name.

Posted by: Karen at July 28, 2009 11:07 AM Karen, in the Deep South the terms for Ken’s behavior and place in McPhee household is Uncle or Auntie.
Steph, isn’t it great when you can when you can stand there smiling knowing they are going to make it!

Congrats to the riders and to you for the successful raising of each child. Since you comment about the challenge of km/mi conversion, there is a Dashboard Widget on your Mac, right there ready to help you. It’s quite good.

dunno, I always rode mtn bike hill climbs selfishly for the glory and adulation, not that I ever won or had awesome finish times. Yer daughter is so cool to do this ride! btw @Ma, love your post and agree should we desire a flame war.
Will soon be knitting in my new/old popup camper which we just bought from a couple older then us! Will be heading out for Cape Breton to visit the family in Sept. Will be visiting the out of the way Intervale Mohair to stock up on the local produce and visit one of my favorite knitters. Maybe Newfoundland next year, YEAH!
Warmest, kindest regards from Red Sox country,
Nancy

Back in the early 1900s there was a man down here in Texas who let his two young sons, ages 7 and 9, ride horseback to New York, NY, alone. When they got there, they were given the keys to a car their father had purchased. And then they drove the car back to Texas, again alone. Of course, it was a different world back then. The father hunted wolves with his bare hands. Teddy Rosevelt, while he was President, once came to the Waggoner Ranch just south of Vernon, Tx, to hunt wolves with the boys’ father.
But, as I say,it’s a “whole ‘nother world” out there today, though I’m sure you have done a good job of parenting, and your wee (oops) big girl Megan will be fine!

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Megan!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is that Ken in the middle? THE Ken that is in some of your essays? GO KEN!
GO GO GO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let the light shine on………
Thank you for keeping your blog up and running in spite of all the projects you are involved in and, well, other challenges too.

Good job Mom and Dad…what a kid. I had to go back and check some of her baby pix…what a beautiful, smart and engaging face she has. And, determination and vision like her mom/dad. Bravo all of you…have a good rest Megan, Pato and Ken!!

Yay, Meg, Pato and Ken! I was sort of envying them the ride until you posted about rain. Blech, ugh, blah! That’s dedication!
And? I don’t think your love for Joe would be less mature if you gave him a little dish of radishes all to himself to add to his salad. (This is how my husband deals with celery, which I like and he hates.)

YOu and your husband should be very proud of your daughter. She is an excellent reflection of you and your wonderful parenting! And any kid who holds up their mom’s knitting and actually looks proud is a real delight!

I guess I am a weepy person because I teared up reading your note. So many people with AIDs are helped by people like Megan, Pato, Ken and your whole family. Their work and you linking us all through the blog reminds me how we can all connect and work together — no matter where we are in the world. Thank you.

Congratulations to Megan and Pato and Ken — and to their mothers, all of them, for raising such wonderful children. People who care, and also put their caring on the line, are special, and sadly, all to rare in these days.

“Meg’s not a finished person yet, (I like to think most people aren’t. It’s encouraging.) …”
Absolutely.
I gotta say, I was not a child anyone would want. The whole thing got worse and worse and imploded when I was 32. I don’t know that I have regained all the lost ground, but I am doing my best to become a pleasant, usefull person and correct a bunch of Attitude.
One of the biggest influences was that my mother quit smoking when I was 14 to 15. (She did it gradually-she smoked a lot.) She changed so I knew it could be done. A parent does their best, and they can never know what will be a major influence on their kid.
I needed to say that for the moms who are reading this amazing positive thing with all the warm supportive posts, and it hurts. It wasn’t my parents’ fault. It wasn’t even my fault. But it was frightfully painfull all around and it is my responsability to clean it up. The most amazing messes get righted.
So thank you to Stephanie for being an amazing person, having lovely family and friends, writing terrific books, and all the people who read her and post lovely comments.

Kudos to your Meg! That is quite a quest she has gone on, and more power to her.
What is it about the “boo” at the end of a girl’s name? We call my daughter Jessie-Boo, have since she was a tiny thing. But I never heard anyone called that until I was grown up. A co-worker and I shared an apartment for a few months and she had a sister who was nicknamed “Boo”. Never ran into it before or since. But it works so well.

Congratulations on your daughter’s accomplishments. I’m sorry for the discouraging posts. I am new to your books and your blogs, but I log on whenever I get the chance. I just finished Yarn Harlot and laughed out loud throughout. I woke up my husband to read out loud to him and he even laughed. I have a small knitting circle here in CA and I read out loud to them each week from your book. I don’t think they “get” it like we do, being Knitters. 🙂 You’re amazing and admired. Hang in there!

Its HOW far?? I cant imagine going that distance without the use of a plane. Or at least a high-speed train.
Those are impressive kids. Ken is pretty special too and you have good grounds to be proud of all of them.

Hello,
I’m in desperate of your skill! I had this crazy idea of creating a very meaningful sweater for a friend, took lessons and everything, but can’t reach your skill level. Would you be interested to help?
Thanks,
Renee