hard or carrying all the weight. “Wow, that’s some serious mommage there.”

Mommified – the act of cleaning up a child before they head off to school. May involve such things as the use of mom-spit, bathing after a mom-sniffing or forcible changing of clothes like socks that don’t match or shorts in the middle of winter.

Mommercise – the exercise of chasing your child around for a bath, wrestling them into clothes, running after them before they decide to chase a ball into traffic or realizing they left the water running in the bathtub and racing upstairs.

Momsense – something moms say that actually makes sense. Wise words. “hey, when you told me not to lick the light socket, you know, that was some good momsense there.”

Momforting – that comfort that can only be given by a mom to her child. Usually involves hugs, snuggles or a kiss on a boo-boo.

What happens when a mom hears someone’s hurting her child

Momminator – that which the mom turns into when someone has hurt their child.

Mommunication – the sole purpose of a cell phone, that is to say, to tell your mom where you are, where you’ve gone or when you’ll be home.

Mombo – that dance move that moms do that embarrassed their kids (and often is done just to embarrass the kids.)

Defconmom – the moment just before mom is about to lose her shit.

Mawm!!! That word used when a child needs him mom like now, like right now. It’s either an arterial cut or they can’t find an eraser.

For me, I lost my mom a long time, ago. Before I could tell her how right she’d been, before I could thank her for all that she gave up for me and my brother, before I could apologize for all the times I made her angry or made her cry.

I miss you mom.

Missing my mom

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About Joe Cummings

Aquarius. Traveler. Gamer. Writer. A New Parent.
4 of these things are easy. One is not.
But the journey is that much better for the new people in my life. A life I want to share with others, to help them, maybe, to make them feel less alone, sure, to connect with the greater world, absolutely.

3 Responses to 10 New Mom Words

Very touching Joe, and brave.
That’s a really clever list: congratulations. May I add some?
Cinnamom: one of those moms that always has baked goods ready and waiting.
Momentum: irresistible force generated by a mom that has set her mind on something (“There’s no use fighting it, dad, she’s got momentum.”)
Mumble: that quiet, under-her-breath yet so-very-audible last word that some mothers can generate.
Pessimum: best exemplified by what a pessimum says: “Put down that straw: someone will lose an eye” or “And that will put bread on the table?”. In use: “I wanted to go on the ride, but her pessimum came out and she vetoed it.”
Optimum: opposite of pessimum — she sees the best in one and has faith that things will turn out.
They’re not nearly as clever as yours….