Category Archives: Couples / Marital Mediation

{4 minutes to read} One of the most important functions I can perform for my divorcing clients is to help them work through the various “What If?” scenarios as they make their decisions in mediation. A “What If?” scenario is an exploration of various possible outcomes to a question that has been raised in regard to an important issue. Exploring the options will facilitate reaching the best decision for a couple.

{3:48 minutes to read} If you’re choosing mediation for your divorce, in many instances it makes good sense to use a mediator who is also an attorney. An attorney/mediator who specializes in divorce law will be knowledgeable of the divorce statutes and case law, and can (and should) share that information with clients. Then, when the couple is ready to proceed with having their settlement agreement drafted, the attorney can prepare the agreement for them.

{3:20 minutes to read} Did you know that divorce and marital separation are the 2nd and 3rd most significant stressors in an individual’s life?

Studies conducted by psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe in 1970 identified the Top Stressors in a person’s life. Their research continues to be valid, even 45 years later. Here’s their list of the Top Ten, in order of significance:

I published an article recently about marital mediation in the context of couples who have been working with a family or couples therapist. Since this is such an important and little understood subject, I would like to take the opportunity to explain this process from a broader perspective.

Very little has been written to date about an intriguing and ‘new’ use of mediation in the family setting. Most people have heard about divorce mediation, which gives divorcing couples the opportunity to reach agreements about their property, parenting and support without having to go through a litigated (contested) divorce. The mediator, who is neutral, facilitates the conversations the couple needs to have, and helps them brainstorm options – enabling them to come up with better, win-win solutions for themselves and their children.

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Thanks, Susan. You hosted an awesome session today at the ADFP [Association of Divorce Financial Planners] on special needs kids and divorce. It made me realize how many intricacies there are with special needs children and one really has to become an expert or refer to one if a client faces such a situation.

During our divorce mediation Susan expertly guided us through a minefield of issues. Initially, my ex and I couldn’t agree on anything. But as we worked our way through the mediation process we calmed down with each other. For the first time, we really understood what needed to happen for us to get on with our lives. Susan brought both strength and compassion in guiding us through this process.

A. G.New York, NY

Hi Susan. I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank you again for your knowledge, guidance and patience during my mediation process. I’m in a very good & happy place now and I know that you are a large part of what got me to where I am.

L. H.New York, NY

For a long time my sisters and I couldn’t agree about our mother’s care. Thank goodness a friend referred us to Susan. Within two sessions, we were able to agree on mom’s moving into an assisted living facility. Since then, we’ve gone back one more time when a second difficult situation arose. We feel confident that mom’s being cared for in the right place, and our family relationship has greatly improved.

L. S.Riverdale, NY

How can I put into words the value of your coaching sessions? In the span of a few short weeks, you have helped me figure out what is most important in my life. By following your creative, challenging and always motivating tasks, I have made great strides in developing my business plan and more importantly, my goals for personal fulfillment. Your coaching has been priceless; there are not enough words to thank you.

N. F.Plainview, NY

Susan brought tremendous skill and understanding to our divorce mediation. My ex and I have two young children, and we were most concerned about their being okay after the divorce. She helped us figure out what was best for our kids and each of us as well. We couldn’t have reached as good a result without her expert help!

C. W.Brooklyn, NY

I came to Susan at a real crossroads in my life and career. In a short time she helped me connect and truly understand my core values. Susan’s coaching style is thoughtful, friendly, warm—which makes each session better than the last. Nevertheless, she is no softy! She challenged me to look deeper and work hard. I would recommend her to anyone seeking to better understand their life goals and develop positive motivation in their lives.

J. B.Boston, MA

Susan. I think any family who hires you for mediation has a gift! Right now the only thing I can add is that it seems to me this service should be given more exposure and public attention, as it can be enormously helpful in many ways.