Monthly Archives: February 2012

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I just wanted to stop by and ask you all to say a small prayer for my mom this weekend, if you find it in your heart. I know all of you may not be religious, but it never hurts to ask.

I got a text from my mom yesterday, and she said she has to go see a general surgeon for something doctors found on her neck. When she told me, I was shocked but also scared because I know first hand what it’s like going under the knife. I thought about her all day yesterday and all night, and it was like God laid it on my heart to send out a prayer request to my readers.

My mom is one of the most important, if not THE most important, people in my life, and I don’t want anything to happen to her. Please pray that this is nothing major and that the surgeon will have the wisdom to diagnose the problem to the best of his ability. I’ll keep you posted. Thank you all and God bless you.

This post first appeared on Susan Ritchie’s blog, and she has graciously allowed me to re-post it, in its entirety. Thank you Susan. I hope you enjoy the tips she shares to help you feel more confident. Check back this weekend, when I will share my own personal experiences of implementing Susan’s tips to help me be more confident 🙂

Telling Tales; Seven Ways to Convince Them You’re Confident!

Coping with nerves-convince them you’re confident!

There will be times in all our lives when we need to act confidently, but inside we’re just not feeling it.

Even though we don’t feel confident, it’s possible to act as though we are by presenting a calm and controlled exterior for a short time, to get us through whatever situation we may find ourselves in. Quite often all that’s needed is to begin to do something, and then as we relax into it, our nerves tend to melt away. I’ve found this particularly when I was acting; I’d be a bundle of nerves in the wings, but once I got on stage, I could relax and enjoy myself.

So whether it’s a job interview, the first day in a new role, making that major presentation or having a difficult conversation, having a “Success Routine” prepared in advance can really help. Before the event, you need to be in the best possible mental state. Here are some tips to help you construct yours.

1. Smile. Smiling instantly makes us feel better, and smiling at someone else usually prompts them to smile back, whether it’s an audience at a presentation, colleagues in a meeting, a customer or the boss! And having someone smile at you can help instantly to calm the nerves.

2. See yourself as acting confidently by visualizing. Athletes do this all the time; they visualize themselves winning, and that’s what you need to do, too. In whatever situation you’re trying to cope with nerves, visualize your ideal self being successful and confident. Work hard to banish any other images from your mind; take control of your thoughts.

3. Hold your body confidently. Be deliberately conscious of your posture, as our unconscious will leak through and expose your nerves if you’re not careful. If you’re standing, stand tall: shoulders back, feet shoulder width apart, arms bent at the elbows and hands in front of you loosely touching-what body langauge expert Elizabeth Kuhkne calls the “power position.” Walk into a room with your head high, taking your time to look around and make eye contact with people around you. Use your body to make you feel more confident and in control. Simply standing up straight can expand your lungs, allowing more air to enter as you breathe more deeply, instantly boosting your calmness.

4. Breathe! It’s surprisingly easy to forget to do this, and nervous people tend to take shallow breaths that can make them feel like they are hyperventilating. Breathe deeply down into your tummy. If you have time, try doing a three-minute mindfulness meditation somewhere quiet to focus you. You can find one here.

5. Speak with confidence. This means not only what you’re telling yourself, but how you are telling the world. Nervous voices can seem high and squeaky, so take a sip of water before you speak, clear your throat and make an effort to lower your voice slightly, slowing your pace-this will make you sound calmer and more in control, and you’ll feel it, too. But it’s also important to tune your inner voice to a confident channel. Get rid of wishy-washy words and phrases like “might” and “maybe,” and instead replace them will firm affirmations of success: “I will…” and “I am…” tell yourself that ARE successful at whatever it is you are doing, and your brain will begin to believe it!

6. Hold something. Body language experts might disagree, but I find holding my glasses while my hands are in the power position gives me something project my nerves into. It allows me to gesticulate calmly and elegantly, and also I feel with an air of gravitas – try it.

7. Lastly, using music to help fire you up into the right mental state can be immensely powerful. Have your favorite three power tracks on full blast in the car, or if possible on something you can listen to just before you have to “perform” – not always practical I know, but it’s something to aim for.

Creating a “success routine” can help ease your nerves and calm you down at times when your nerves may be running rampant. Have you got any other ideas? I’d love you to add them in the comments below.

About Susan Ritchie

After 10 years travelling the world with her son as a single mum, Susan Ritchie is now the Confidence Mentor, helping successful professionals to minimize their stress and maximize their confidence at work. Her blogs offer inspirational advice and tips to help others to make themselves matter!

To find out more about her and her business, and read more of her writing, check out youtimecoaching.co.uk.

By now you have probably seen the catchy television commercials for MasterCard. They start by identifying some things that people can buy with their MasterCard, then show a moment that is priceless and end by saying, “There are some things money can’t buy, for everything else there’s MasterCard.”

For example, in one such commercial there is a man and his young son headed to the baseball park. The commercial shows the dad buying his son a hot dog and you hear the words, “Hot dog at the big league game…$3.00.”

Photo courtesy abuckeyeinbeantown.wordpress.com

The next scene shows the dad buying a game program and the words, “Program…$6.00.” Then, one of those large, orange hands with the fingers forming a #1 is shown and you hear something like, “Large, orange hand…$15.00.” The commercial finishes by showing the father explaining some important aspect of the game to his son, who is listening intently as he looks up at his father with excitement in his eyes, “Meaningful conversation between a father and a son… priceless.”

Friends, I’m not unlike those agencies promoting their favorite credit card. I’m here to advertise. You see, my life is a commercial for others to see. I’m a card carrying representative for the Master’s Card. That’s right, the MASTER’S CARD. Let me tell you about it. There are no finance charges, no payments due. My bill has already been covered…it’s a prepaid deal. I couldn’t afford the price, so Jesus stepped in and paid it for me. My Name is written on the card for all to see.

It is accessible twenty-four hours a day from anywhere in the world. The MASTER’S CARD has so many benefits it’s hard to list them all. Let me share some of them with you…you might want to apply for a personal card yourself. Just for starters there is UNLIMITED GRACE. That’s right, there is no preset limit to the amount of grace you receive from the MASTER’S CARD. Have you been looking for love in all the wrong places? Then, look no farther than the MASTER’S CARD. It offers the greatest rate on love that has ever been offered.

The MASTER’S CARD gives you access to many “members only” benefits. Want real joy despite the difficulties of life? Apply for the MASTER’S CARD. Want a lasting peace? Apply for the MASTER’S CARD.

Want real joy despite the difficulties of life? Apply for the MASTER’S CARD. Want a lasting peace? Apply for the MASTER’S CARD. Looking for something you can always rely on in a jam? The MASTER’S CARD is perfect for you.

Another great thing about the MASTER’S CARD is that it never expires. Once you’re a member, you’re a member for life…eternal life, that is. Membership has its privileges, you know.

How do you receive the MASTER’S CARD. Dial 1-800-ROMANS10:9 “if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” Jesus is standing by right now to take your call. Don’t delay. This great offer won’t last forever. Peace, joy and hope: Invaluable. Faith, contentment and assurance: Inestimable. Salvation: Priceless.

There are some things money can’t buy. For those, there’s the Master’s Card. Christian, why not be an advertisement for the MASTER’S CARD. Let your life be a commercial today for Jesus Christ.

I just wanted to stop by and show the blog some love this morning before I left for work. If everything goes as planned, I’ll be back this weekend with a lot of posts, will try to respond to comments and will also try to read some of the blogs in my blogroll.

I know I keep saying I’m going to respond and read your blogs, but such is the life of a part-time working man… By the way, living with spina bifida, having no energy, epsecially during the winter, and not being able to do something most people take for granted isn’t a walk in the park either.

I know I shouldn’t complain but I feel like my disability and work have taken time away from my friends and the blog. I’m just thankful you haven’t given up on me yet. Thanks for sticking by my side, when things get tough. Like the old saying, “When the going get tough, the tough get going!!”

Hi guys. I know its been a while since I posted something to the blog, but such is the life of a working man and aspiring author. For those who haven’t heard I’m currently working on my first book, a fictional look into my life with spina bifida. A few friends on Twitter and at work talked me into writing it, but now that I’ve written three chapters I’m doubting my abilities as an author. I’m working on a few other chapters, jotting down ideas as I go, but something just isn’t clicking.

That’s why I’m putting out a call for other writers and anyone with a creative mind to critique my work and provide feedback about how to make the chapters better. I’m really struggling and could use all the advice I can get. If you’re interested in reading my work and critiquing it honestly, comment on this post or send me an e-mail. I really would appreciate any and all advice you could give. Thanks!!!

Well, another Valentine’s Day has come and gone, and your’s truly is still sadly single. But that’s okay, I’ve got the greatest, most amazing friends in the world and a loving family who is always in my heart. I hope you enjoy this poem I wrote last year. Happy Valentine’s Day, wherever you are.

Lonely Valentine

See that blonde over by the bar
Staring at me from afar
Sitting alone in the corner
Does she know how much I adore her?

Eating fries and chicken fingers
The image of her still lingers
Every time she smiles, she’s so hot
How long I’ve been here, I totally forgot

Does she know I exist?
To ask would be a big risk
Happy hour’s over
My courage sinking lower

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge and all the others, including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all repaired their boats and left.

Love wanted to persevere until the last possible moment. When the island was almost sinking, Love decided to ask for help. Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said, “Richness, can you take me with you?” Richness answered, “No, I can’t. There is a lot of silver in my boat. There is no place here for you.”

Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. “Vanity, please help me!” “I can’t help you Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat,” Vanity answered.

Sadness was close by so Love asked for help, “Sadness, let me go with you.” “Oh….Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself.”

Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her!

Suddenly there was a voice, “Come Love, I will take you.” It was an elder. Love felt so blessed and overjoyed that he even forgot to ask the elder his name. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went his own way.

Love realizing how much he owed the elder, asked Knowledge, another elder, “Who helped me?” “It was Time,” Knowledge answered. “Time?” asked Love. “But why did Time help me?” Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, “Because, only Time is capable of understanding how great Love is.”