Take a night out on Bocas Town

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Make sure to spend at least one night enjoying the town's after-dark side. This consists of, well, bars -- and lots of ‘em. The fun but hectic La Iguana features Coyote Ugly-like blonde bartenders, but it’s infinitely more charming because you’re drinking ice-cold $1 beers over the water. At the Book Store, an expat named Dave will embody all your stereotypes of an amicable raconteur resident of Margaritaville (the bathroom walls will warn you of his verbosity). Get to know any local well over your stay, and before you know it, you’ll be witnessing some Real Housewives of Boca Town drama unfurling before you. It’s almost inevitable; enjoy the show.

When you’re done, stumble up and down the two main calles and jump in any spot that tickles your fancy, but don’t miss out on Barco Hundido, the locals’ version of La Iguana. With its maze of docks crisscrossing over and around its namesake sunken ship, the place has an atmosphere that’s impossible to replicate. It also has an incredibly chatty DJ, but it’s worth putting up with his shenanigans after you’ve imbibed a half-dozen seco con vacas, a local favorite made with sugarcane liquor and milk. The morning after, no matter what state you’re in, the warm Caribbean air will be licking your ears, tempting you to push back your flight just one more day... again.