Decoding the Facebook: Summer Blockbusters Edition!

Figure out what your friends are really trying to say about this summer’s biggest releases!

The season of the movie franchise is upon us. Right this very moment, studio heads and execs are twiddling their fingers with anticipation at the possible box office receipts from this summer’s biggest releases. Avengers, Dark Knight Rises, Prometheus, MIB III – all of them are waiting to take your money, and the buzz on sites like Facebook is no different.

But have you ever noticed that people don’t say what they really mean on Facebook, and more often than not status updates are more of a “look at me” gesture than genuine thought and feeling? Well worry no more with CRAVE’s own DECODING THE FACEBOOK series.

Take a look:

Mindy (about an hour ago): Snow White and the Huntsman looks like it could really, really awesome!

What they’re really trying to say: “Maybe if I work hard enough I can have the acting skills of a lemur like Kristen Stewart.”

Todd (2 hours ago): Prometheus! Prometheus! Prometheus!

What they’re really trying to say: “I have no f*cking clue what this movie is about, but I do know that if it sucks I’m going write a really mean blog about it. Suck it, Ridley Scott!”

Rachel (yesterday): There is only one movie you need to see this summer… Twilight, bitches.

What they’re really trying to say: “I love twilight because I’m 42, single, and my uterus has been corrupted by decades of anxiety about uterus corruption.“

Forrest (17 hours ago): Save yourselves the long lines and get a little culture by seeing a independent movie at an INDPENDANT THEATRE!

What they’re really trying to say: “Who cares about massive robots kicking the shit out of each other when you can see a Lithuanian movie about domestic abuse staring Poland’s biggest soap star!”

Margo (15 minutes ago): Does anyone know of any good films for a nice Christian family to go and see?

What they’re really trying to say: “I know you’re out there and you can hear me Mel Gibson.”