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Health

Alright, well, since you’re twisting my arm, I’m going to admit it. With my other three pregnancies, my workout routine was non-existent. With Jaxon and Julia I had no excuse, I just didn’t feel like it. With Jayde, I had some health complications that caused swelling in my legs. This go around, I found some exercises that I can totally stick with. And even better, I don’t even really have to leave home, unless I plan on swimming of course.

I’m so blessed to have had relatively easy and fast deliveries, but I know that as you age, pregnancies become more challenging. I figure I should do as much as I can, while I can, to help this pregnancy go as smoothly as the others. Say a little prayer for me.

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This is my 4th go around and I still don’t know how to say it. Sure, there are a ton of other things more uncomfortable while being pregnant, but this is right around the top of the list. I tend to be overly conscious of hurting other people’s feelings but I can’t think of a sweet, pleasant way to say, “KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF MY BELLY!”

I’m not a very touchy-feely person {says the pregnant lady with 3 kids}. Not that I run from it, but it’s just not my natural tendency. Typically, I prefer a nice generous arm-and-a-half’s length distance between myself and the person I’m talking to. Now of course, if we’re standing next to a jackhammer in the middle of a construction zone, okay sure, you can come closer but in general if you’re close enough to high-five, you’re probably too close. However, drop a cat in my lap and I melt. LOL Seriously though, one of the great things about having children is that I’ve become a lot more…cuddly. Who can resist a cuddle from the minnies?

I hope I don’t sound like Negative Nancy here {blame the hormones}, but tell me, what do you think about someone touching your pregnant belly? I know there’s something so cute about a pregnant belly and some people just can’t help themselves, but a pregnant belly is not an invitation to touch. Would you agree?

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During pregnancy there’s a lot going on in a woman’s body. Often times all of these changes cause a woman to get dry skin, oily skin, blotchy skin and even dark spots. Present most commonly in women of color is the later, dark spots. Speaking first hand, this is actually a common condition. So common, in fact, that it is referred to as the mask of pregnancy. Really…Google it!

Blotches of dark skin usually appear around your cheekbones, upper lip area, nose and forehead sort of like a mask. Not only does it appear on the face but on other parts of the body as well, usually areas that are exposed to direct sun like your forearms. Areas of your skin that are already a darker pigment such as freckles, moles and nipples can become darker as well.

Oh and let’s not forget the “linea nigra”. The who? All women have a line from the belly button to the pubic bone called a linea alba. Chances are you never noticed it because most times it’s the same color as the rest of your skin. During pregnancy, this line becomes pigmented and is then called the linea nigra. While the other dark spots will usually fade back to your normal skin color a month or so after delivery, the linea nigra will take a bit longer, maybe closer to three months.

As I mentioned it’s natural for your skin to become oily, dry, or even a combo. I’ve never had a skin routine…let me rephrase that…I’ve never had a skin routine that I would admit to {since hand soap and water is embarrassing} but while I’m pregnant, I do try to pay extra special attention to the changes going on with my body including my face. I will say, that I have one rule that I must must must wash my face before I go to sleep. True story, I’ve woken up in the middle of the night to wash my face. Call me weird, but I just imagine all the smog, dust, finger dirt, smoke from the day caked up on my skin seeping deeper and deeper into my pores that I’m compelled to stick my face under that faucet.

When I heard about Specific Beauty Exfoliating Cleansing Cloths, I was pretty excited to try them out because it would mean one less thing for me to do before I go to sleep. How? Well, what I learned about these cloths is one side is beaded and intended for exfoliating your skin while the other side is for removing makeup. It’s alcohol and oil free which means it’s safe for me and baby and doesn’t even require water. They contain aloe, which even I know is good for your skin. And Vitamin E and green tea which are potent antioxidants. They’re even safe for contact-lens wearers. So, you can literally leave them on your nightstand, get in the bed with your cookies and gallon of ice cream…what…give your face a good clean and go to sleep guilt-free. Oh, and did I mention they are made specifically for women of color. Yup!

Try them out. They’re very reasonably priced and I think you’ll be glad you did.

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I know, I know…it’s my fourth go around so I should be used to the total drain of energy, the nausea from dusk till dawn, the complete and utter bouts of total insta-starvation that hit oh about 1:00 a.m…well, I should be but I’m not. Maybe being pregnant on top of chasing 3 small children is what’s making me so crazy.

Although it’s only been a few short weeks, this pregnancy so far has been quite different than my last 3. I’ve been super moody {poor hubs}. I’ve been super hungry all.the.time! {poor hubs}. I’ve had no energy to do a single thing. {poor hubs}. Jonathan really does deserve a trophy or something. He never complains, or rolls his eyes {at least in my presence} and he’s always by my side.

Being pregnant always reminds me of how thankful I am to not only have a husband, but a good husband. A husband who will make dinner, fold laundry, and change diapers at the drop of a hat. Yes, yes…I’m spoiled.

This is what six week old fetus looks like. Already, so much has begin developing.

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You know that saying, “You can’t fit a round peg into a square hole”? This is one of my favorite quotes because often I find myself trying to do things a certain way and end up frustrated and sometimes even to the point of throwing my hands up in defeat. Later I realize the process isn’t easy because I’m forcing something that isn’t supposed to be. It’s not until I stop, look and listen that I can then see past the process in front of me. Lessons like these are not only relevant to tasks and daily routines, they are also relevant to our interactions and relationships with friends and family. Sometimes there are people, friends, family in our lives that aren’t meant to stay. Sometimes the changes we don’t want are the changes we need to grow. As we grow older, many of us {hopefully} realize what we need and what we need to leave behind. Although it’s not easy, in some relationships, walking away is a step forward. That doesn’t mean giving so-and-so a piece of your mind and storming off, because for some of us a pieces is all we have. LOL It means, putting one foot in front of the other and simply walking away.

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You know how you come across those posts sometimes and you get the feeling that maybe she was rushed or unprepared because she either just has a post with a couple of pictures and no text or a little bit of text but it’s like, “Hey guys sorry for the quick post, but I’m running out to _________ with _________! XO”. Weeeeeell, that’s me today except my story goes like this.

Hey guys, sorry for the quick post, but I’m running to change clothes so that I can look halfway decent for tonight’s Young Adult LIFE Group that the Hubby and I are hosting. LOL

Oh and sorry, the title is misleading. This post has absolutely squat to do with running or getting in shape or anything having to do with fitness or being healthy.

On this journey of raising a family, deepening my faith and building a company, I’ve realized how valuable time is and how easy it is to waste time if I’m not focusing on my priorities.

I read something the other day that was a good reminder for me to focus on the relationships that are most important in life and the rest of the pieces will fall into place.

Nurture your important relationships in such a way that when you tell the people you care about that you care about them, you’re simply reinforcing what they already know based on how you have prioritized then into your life. Give them your full attention. Let them see their own beauty in your eyes. Let them find their own voice through your listening ears. Help them discover their own greatness in your presence.

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We all have that friend from high school or middle school or even grade school who we thought would be in our corner “forEVER ever”. The one who knew our deepest darkest secrets and greatest fears. And then it happens…life, that is, and we lose touch. That one time BFF becomes just an acquaintance.

While it’s natural to feel sad about the distance that’s grown between you, I’ve learned to accept that some of those friends are no longer the friends we once knew. And that’s okay. But, I’ve also learned that life doesn’t always change as fast as people do. It’s painful when those who you’ve called friends and who’s highs you’ve celebrated and lows you’ve consoled no longer return that most valuable part of the relationship…love.

This truth affects all kinds of relationships. I’ve lost count of the times friends have shared how much they miss the guy they thought was Mr. Right once a relationship has ended. In reality, what they miss is the feeling they had when they were with so-called “Mr. Right”. So easily we confuse the two.

Life is a series of experiences; many of which are relationships. Many times how we navigate through those experiences will determine our success in life. I admit, I haven’t always gotten it right with the relationship experiences in my life. In fact, most times I’ve gotten it wrong. I’m horrible at returning text messages. I hate talking on the phone and special dates like birthdays….you can forget it. However, in order for me to get my relationships right with others, it’s important for me that I get my relationship right with God first…after all, there’s no relationship more important.

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Friends ask me what it’s like to be “off the leash” and no longer working a 9 to 5. I feel like it hasn’t been that long since I left my full time job but it’s been since the end of July so about 1 month. Truth is, it’s been great!

I have the flexibility to take care of home, drop off and pick up my kids and pursue the path God has for me. I love having a chance to actually sit down and ask my kids how their day was instead of listening with one ear and talking to them over the clanging of pots and pans or in the middle of washing dishes. I get to give them focused attention and really be present. We’ve been reading Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing by Judy Blume – one chapter a night and they get REALLY into it. We’re on the chapter when Peter is put in charge of Fudgie’s birthday party. Poor Peter.

A few weeks ago Julia said to me, “Mom, I need attention.” I don’t remember what it was I was doing but she was right. She does. Of my three littles, I’m sad to say that Julia gets the short end of the stick. On one hand she acts so stinkin mature that it’s almost like there’s another full grown adult (who occasionally needs her bum wiped) living in our house. I have to remind myself that she’s only 4, especially when she says to me, “Mommy, why are you trying to be cuter than me?” lol I never really know how to respond to that so I say, “I can never be cuter than you, Julia!”

Someone once said, “You validate people’s lives, by the attention you give them” and for children this is the absolute truth. The only way they know you love them is by your actions. They don’t fully understand the concept of love like adults do, but they know it when they’re not getting it. For many parents, it’s not until it’s too late that they realize the kind of attention their child did get versus the kind of attention the child didn’t get makes a huge impact on the life path the child chooses to take as a teen and into early adulthood.

I thank God for the opportunity to spend more time with my littles and my husband. Not every parent does so I must seize the moment.