twin in the city

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

the end to a chapter of a very long, happy, passionate story.

i am exactly two presentations, two final exams, and two papers away from finishing this semester. friday is the happy day in which all this work ends, and it honestly feels like it is light years away. i keep reminding myself, 'megan, you WILL make it!'

i've sort of been in a bittersweet position this past week, seeing that my high school class is graduating college. someone please tell me, where did the four years go? because i transferred colleges (more than once), i lost some credits along the way, and certain classes were not accepted at my current school, FIT. so to receive my bachelor's degree, the totality of my college career is five years, and not four. but the way i see it is, i have barely done anything in my life 'the normal' way. i feel that everything i have learned and accomplished has been to due mistakes, error, and hard work. i don't think anything has come easily to me. so why would i graduate on time like the rest of my high school class? to be perfectly honest, i'm happy that i'm not done with college yet. after transferring twice to find my perfect school, i don't want it to end. and the thought of my formal education coming to a close just flat out scares me. and finding a REAL job! yikes!

but i hope that by this time next year, i will be ready to start my grown-up life.

i still have a lot to figure out.

the story of how i ended up in new york city is a long one, but one of my favorite stories to tell. basically, my twin sister and i thought we could survive four years without each other, so we parted ways after high school, and started our lives three hours and 134 miles apart. our first night apart was easily one of the hardest nights i've lived.

as identical twins, we were once a whole, a sole being that decided to split into two. the only way i can describe it is she is the other half of me, and i am the other half of her. so it's pointless to say that our new independent lives were not easy. i lasted one semester, and knew i couldn't do it any longer. i transferred to the university of new hampshire to be with her, with no regard to my dream career. we got a little house in the woods, and spent week nights watching 'the city,' an mtv reality show focused on the lives of new york city's fashion notables. that one half hour, each week, was the soul of my happiness. my dreams, my passion, my life...were right there. in new york city. i was certain. our little house could have been up in flames,
and nothing would have taken my eyes off the television.

that was the life i wanted, i was so sure of it.

the thing was, i knew that a good ten million other girls in the world probably wanted it too. but i knew that i was the one in those ten million that would actually do something about it, and go for it.

and i did.

on a whim, i applied to the fashion institute of technology, one of the most highly respected fashion schools in the world. (oh, and did i mention that twin applied too?) months past, and before i knew it a large envelope was sitting on my kitchen table. at this point, i had created a schedule for my upcoming semester that i didn't even care about. i couldn't even imagine my life at unh any longer. it was a dead end. what would i do if they didn't accept me? my future was in that envelope.

an inspirational message written on the cover of a large folder sealed my fate,

i was going to new york city. and twin was too.

...

one year later, my sister was interning for the very company that was showcased on 'the city,' ELLE magazine, passing by famed industry members such as joe zee and robbie myers on a daily basis.

i think the problem in society is too many people don't chase their dreams, for fear of not catching them. but if you don't follow them, and run after them...they will get away. i know that when i am old and gray i will look back and know i caught mine, and squeezed them really, really tight.