Shalandria Gammon, née Rhonda Norton

A young woman in an elaborately-ruffled pink dress answers the door. "Oh!" she exclaims, "is that genuine Pork Elf finery? How marvelous! Bellybutton!" She curtsies deeply.

"...Sorry, what?"

"Oh, it's a traditional Pork Elf greeting. In the modern tongue, it coincidentally translates to 'bellybutton'. I'm a great fan of Pork Elf culture, you know. Actually, I'm one-sixteenth Pork Elf, on my mother's side. Can you tell?"

You look her up and down, but don't see anything out of the ordinary about her. "Um... sure."

"Here," she says, holding up a tray of glistening transparent cubes, "try one of these -- I've been experimenting with traditional Pork Elf recipes!"

You take one of the cubes and beat a polite but hasty retreat, before she can start telling you more about her adopted culture.