26 March 2010

Unless, of course, you run into angry hippos and lions while trying to poach animals in a nature preserve:

Poaching seems quite a bit less appealing today after an incident that occurred in South Africa. All that remains of one man, who entered Kruger National Park with the intent of illegally hunting animals, is his skull and a few scraps of clothing. After he and two companions snuck into the nature reserve under cover of night to check some illegal traps they had assembled, they were apparently ambushed by a group of angry hippos. The three men all ran in different directions, but only two made it out of the park with their lives. The third, park officials say, was devoured by lions.

"Ambushed?"

What, were the hippos waiting in the preserve's parking lot, hiding behind a dumpster with a couple pieces of pipe and a bike chain?

If you sneak into a wildlife preserve...an African wildlife preserve...after dark...and end up get FUBARed by the inhabitants, it was most definitely not an ambush; it was, if anything, exactly what you should've expected. If you want to talk about ambushes, let me know as soon as these hippos roll some drunk stumbling out after last call at a Bennigan's.