Memories and ADHD

Those of us with ADHD have poor short term memory. That’s just the way it is. We really have to work sometimes to remember something that happened 5 or 10 minutes ago, especially if we were distracted when it happened.

But that’s not the kind of memories I want to talk about. What I mean are long term memories; the kind where you look back over the years and remember the good and not so good times.

Of course we all want lots of good memories and no bad ones, but they say you have to take the bad with the good.

If you’re an ADD Mom – or even if you’re not – what kind of memories are you making for your loved ones?

I remember my early years as a mom, struggling so hard to try and get things together. The house was a mess and I was a mess too. Things were disorganized and chaotic. I really hope that in all of that, my kids have some good memories, too. I thnk they do.

Of course, you can go to the other extreme and be so anal about keeping everything orderly that no one feels comfortable. I used to have a neighbor who sorted and kept her kids crayons and barrettes in color coded order. Believe it or not, she used to arrange the snow piles at the end of the driveway so they were even. That’s way too much.

As I got older and learned how to get things under control, life really took a turn for the better. Our house was sometimes messy – a pair of shoes here, a coat over there – but underneath it was clean. There was balance.

I no longer struggled to find the phone bill and pay it before they turned it off. I no longer invited 10 people for a holiday dinner without going to the grocery store first. I had my act pretty much together and life was (and is) good. That’s the best time to create fond memories for your family.

It is my sincere wish that each of you learn to do the same: to manage your ADHD symptoms and your lives so that you enjoy the days more. Stop living on the edge and learn to relax.

This holdiay season make a commitment to do just that. It’s a life long gift for you and your family.

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