I don't understand this...

This is a discussion on I don't understand this... within the Concealed Carry Issues & Discussions forums, part of the Defensive Carry Discussions category; Ok guys, how many of you have had this problem?
My wife and I were deciding to go somewhere today with the kids. It's going ...

I don't understand this...

Ok guys, how many of you have had this problem?

My wife and I were deciding to go somewhere today with the kids. It's going to be in the lower 70's today, so we were going to make the best of the weather and head to the park or something. I made the suggestion to go to the city park on the other side of town.

She looks at me and says, well we can just go to the elementary school park right up the street... to which I look at her with the look...

When she suddenly realizes why that won't happen. I've had other instances where she suggests going to dinner in Hagerstown down in Maryland... again I give her the look. Unless I have to go somewhere, I tend to avoid gun free zones.

She has her LTCF... but RARELY carries, so she doesn't think that way.

No I do not have similar interactions like that with my wife.
I will never nor have I ever tried to talk her into anything gun related.
She is now interested and is coming to the range on her own free will
and is looking at a nice Kimber .45.

She wants to take some classes and maybe cc class someday but I leave it entirely up to her and her pace. The moment I try to talk her into something she is not into is the moment she will solidify her will against it.

My wife knows the places I will not go because of their gun restrictions. She no longer even mentions going to those places.

GreenHorn: I will never nor have I ever tried to talk her into anything gun related.

The point being made here is not trying to talk her into anything. It is about places that we as lawful concealed carriers chose not to frequent. For example, there are several malls here in the Richmond area that are posted. She knows I will not go to them. If she insists she needs to go to one of them, she knows that before we get there I will stop and buy a magazine to read, while I wait for her in the truck.

Yes it happens

I have been carrying about a year now and even still my wife sometimes suggest going or doing something that I say no to. The hardest is when your in a group suggesting it and your the only one saying no... she usually catches the look and has the oh yeah look on here face or i remind her in private later.

Sometimes it gets old but I still work on her mindset/action plans. She is slowly coming around to possibly carrying.

We have the same issue, except it is not with each other - it is with other family members who have their CCHL. They got theirs before I got mine, but still choose not to carry, and choose to go to gun free zones willingly and frequently...

It is a mindset, and they just choose not to have it...

On the upside it sounds like she is coming around pretty quickly, at least she recognizes the look!!

If I lived in the United States and not the PRNY I might have an opportunity to have that conversation.

Seriously (well actually that was serious), although my wife had her pistol permit for 20 years her interest in firearms, 2nd amendment rights and carry issues is minimal. In general (probably much more so in NY then other parts of the country) women typically are not as much into firearms related issues.

Men are the hunters and defenders, women are the nurturers and gatherers. We think differently.

And yes ladies, I understand there are exceptions to this generalization :).

To the OP - probably best just to continue giving her "the look." It's a very mild rebuke, but it makes her remember and think. Hopefully as time goes by, you will have to give her fewer and fewer looks.

"I pledge allegiance to the war banner of the united states of Totalitaria. And to the Republic, which no longer stands, several bankers, who are now god, indivisible, with Bernanke bucks and credit for all."

To the OP - probably best just to continue giving her "the look." It's a very mild rebuke, but it makes her remember and think. Hopefully as time goes by, you will have to give her fewer and fewer looks.

Not really... she just made the comment "Well when you are gone for your job training I can go to the park up at the school"

She has her gun, she has her permit, she has a holster, she knows she can carry, she knows the laws... she just doesn't carry.

My problem so far has not been the places. My problem is with cover garments. My fashion sence is non-sence. When I am on my own my best description would be Ted Nugent-like. I take some flak for that, but don't back down. I just ask for suggestions of what will work instead.

When it comes to places, well, so far they are places we have to go, like post offices and hospitals.

Oops

Originally Posted by Pro2A

Do you have similar interactions with your significant other?

Yes.....all the time. My wife does NOT think on the terms 'we' do. She has no intrest in carrying and has given me
'that' look for having to consider my sidearm. She also understands why I carry, so that tendsto 'sway'things in my favor 'most' of the time. There is compromises also, but that is part of marriage as well.

That actually made me think of something. I had never really considered before that even after school hours that elementary playgrounds are off limits. I wonder what the likely out come would be if you are caught carrying at night or in the summer on school grounds.