So says the theme song from Team America: World Police,
the bastard child of Thunderbirds and South Park.

In this new marionette-starring film by South Park
creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker, an elite team of world police
jets around the globe wasting terrorists. Convinced of their
righteousness, they unwittingly destroy landmarks such as the
Eiffel Tower and the Pyramids in their war on terrorism, using
intelligence intercepted from TV reports.

Sound familiar? Well, before you dismiss it as pinko Hollywood
propaganda, this film doesn't take sides. Everyone cops it: the
American military, Tinseltown lefties, Jerry Bruckheimer-style
action films and, of course, Arab terrorists, whose every second
word here is jihad.

Co-writer, producer and star Stone says: "If my gravestone says:
'Killed by a jihad', I think that'd be very fitting and very
funny."

That's if North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il doesn't get him
first. The film's arch-villain is portrayed as a megalomaniac with
a speech impediment and weapons of mass destwuction who's planning
9-11 times 100.

Another potential threat to Stone is the giant socialist weasel
Michael Moore, who makes an appearance. Then there's most of
Hollywood's acting elite. In the film, Alec Baldwin heads the
fictional Film Actors Guild (FAG), which includes Tim Robbins,
Susan Sarandon, Matt Damon and Helen Hunt and is pitted against
Team America.

"Half of Hollywood hates us and half of Hollywood loves us,"
Stone says. We do this kind of comedy where if you don't piss off
somebody, you're probably not doing your job."

In which case, the South Park boys must be doing
something right. Sean Penn, who also features in the film, recently
sent Stone and Parker a scathing letter.

"It's all well to joke about me or whomever you choose. Not so
well to encourage irresponsibility that will ultimately lead to the
disembowelment, mutilation, exploitation and death of innocent
people throughout the world." Ouch.

"It's weird arrogance," Stone says, "especially from someone
like him, who's been a Hollywood bad boy for so long. The letter
was incomprehensible. I actually think Sean Penn's a brilliant
actor, even as a puppet, but his reasoning skills are not the
strongest. That's generally the way with actors."

Penn's complaint followed a quote from the duo that appeared in
Rolling Stone.

"Those voter campaigns are always disingenuous. They don't
really care if you vote - they only care if you vote for their
side.

"All I said was: 'If you don't have a strong opinion, don't
vote. But Sean Penn's twisted it into '[Stone and Parker] thought
it'd be cool if people were mutilated.

"Something you have to know about Sean is, he smokes a lot of
weed. Not all weed smokers are insane, but if you do smoke a lot,
who knows where your brain's at?"

Did Stone vote?

"I did not," he says. "I just didn't have a strong opinion one
way or the other.

"I think it was a real detriment to the anti-war movement that
their spokesmen were actors. In the build-up to the Iraq war, every
time you turned on your TV it was like, 'This is the situation in
Iraq and now for an update, let's go to Sean Penn.' Or 'To argue
the other side, we have Janeane Garofalo.'

"It was insane. You'd be like, 'Get the f--- off my news
show!You just want the actors' head to get blown off!"

Such a dream is realised in Team America, lots. But it's
the Kim Jong-il puppet that steals the show. When UN weapons
inspector Hans Blix says the dictator must let him inspect his
palace, Kim feeds him to a shark with a tirade of hilarious
abuse.

Humour is how we deconstruct and analyse serious issues, Stone
says.

Is there any subject too sensitive for this brand of satire?

"I don't think so. A tragedy right after it happens isn't funny.
But as Woody Allen said, 'Comedy is tragedy plus time.'"

Would Stone make fun of the 1999 massacre at Columbine High,
where he went to school in the 80s?

"No, I don't think it's funny yet," Stone says. "But I probably
will in a few years."