Flying by the Seat of My Pants

Just another ordinary day

Sitting at the breakfast table with my family… Just letting that sink in a bit…

Watching as Nik manages his bowl of cereal and banana, his scrambled egg and sausage, and a small glass of almond milk (hello, bottomless pit and hollow legs!). So very typical and yet…not. It occurs to me that, once I’ve prepared his food, the only assistance he needs lately is an occasional admonition to use his napkin or to slow down. To take a break from his methodical shoveling of everything into his mouth until it is overflowing.

I look across the table and watch my husband watching our son. He catches my eye and we smile. “You catching all this?” I ask with a lump in my throat. His only answer is a giant smile which transforms his face into pure joy.

So many years we worked with Nik to just be able to sit in a chair without falling over, to hold a utensil , to lift a cup. So many years we worked with professionals, like our beloved Ms. Michelle, to help him learn to tolerate textures, to initiate a swallow, to chew. Teaching him how to drink from a straw, to suck, swallow and breathe. The things which come naturally to babies but not to our child who spent too long on a ventilator and too long with tubes in his nose and mouth. All the years we wondered and worried, “Will he ever…”

The answer sits at our table in his very own chair with is very own place mat, dishes and utensils. It all looks so…normal.

Because Mama, you lovingly worked so tirelessly to get here, that it sneaks up on you ;0) Your boy is simply a daily miracle. Every so often the daily miracles fold over into a single moment when we are struck by the enormity of God’s graces and how far our babies have come. It doesn’t happen overnight, but sometimes in a single overnight we get just enough rest to awaken and notice those leaps forward. And oh, how they put lumps in our throats!