Polls are showing Hillary Clinton is leading Trump by a substantial margin in Pennsylvania. With the title of presidential loser getting closer to the lead paragraph of his obituary Trump needs to find a way to spin the election story.

Trump told a rally in the Keystone State this week that “the only way we can lose, in my opinion, I really mean this, Pennsylvania, is if cheating goes on.” The folks who attend these rallies must be the losers from high school who have a day off from the gas station. The candidate who will not release his taxes also said “I hope you people can sort of not just vote on the 8th — go around and look and watch other polling places and make sure that it’s 100 percent fine.” Should the goobers bring a soda can to spit their tobacco juice into, too?

A very exhaustive 2014 study by Loyola University Law School professor Justin Levitt found just 31 incidents of voter impersonation out of more than 1 billion ballots were cast in a 14-year span.