HELLO FRIENDS. Tomorrow Victoria gets a public holiday for AFL Grand Final Eve, in a move that I cannot even. As if it’s not bad enough that we get a public holiday for a horse race, we now have to have one for sportsball.

[Liz feels compelled to note here that Stephanie never works on Fridays anyway, and a bonus public holiday in the long, break-free wasteland between the Queen’s Birthday and Cup Day is a gift to us five-day-a-week peons.]

Anyway, Stephanie is a lifelong Sydney Swans supporter, and never has she been more passionate than this year, when deadset legend Adam Goodes has been subject to the gross racism that infests our sport. So in celebration of the end of the season, have some links and commentary and feels.

Two West Coast supporters were evicted for racist behaviour and Goodes was continually booed throughout the match, prompting teammate Lewis Jetta to do an Aboriginal war dance after scoring a goal as a show of support for Goodes.

One of the ejected spectators yelled that Goodes should, “go back to the zoo.”

Former Brisbane Roar goalkeeper Griffin McMaster has weighed into the Adam Goodes racism controversy by suggesting the dual Brownlow medallist and former Australian of the Year should be deported.

I cry laughing every time I read this quote. Adam Goodes is an Indigenous Australian AFL player who was Australian of the Year. He is literally – like – there is no way to be more Australian in this country.

“Adam Goodes calls Australia Day invasion day,” McMaster wrote in a since-deleted tweet.

I’d be happy to see every Indigenous player from now on perform the war dance every time they kick a goal. That would rub it in all our white faces until we truly got the message that you are part of this culture on your own terms and not on the terms that white society deems to be acceptable.

Finally, in other non-racist news, Andrew Bolt has been busy posting clips of Martin Luther King speeches. He’s running a campaign against the ‘race war’ in the AFL, a war conducted, not by the booing fans, but by Adam Goodes, who seems to be singlehandedly oppressing all of Australia’s white football followers.

Yes, that’s right. You see, MLK had a dream that white children would, one day, be able to say whatever they damn well want – and that non-white people would sit there and take it.

Happily, here in Australia, that noble vision seems on the verge of coming true.