Mar 7, 2011

I could be a Grandmother?!

I heard on the radio this morning that the World Record has been set for the world's youngest grandmother - She's 23. Twenty-three people. I'm turning 23 myself. A grandmother at my age?! You may ask how this could even be possible... Well apparently she had herself a daughter when she was 12 years old and ran away from home to keep the child as well. She tried to raise her daughter right so that she wouldn't make the same mistake she did, but then, you know, the apple never falls too far from the tree they say. (Not always true I might add, but definitely in this case). Her daughter had a child of her own at the age of 11.

Now imagine me freaking out here about being a grandmother at the age of 23, but then - imagine me going absolutely nuts or fainting from shock about being a mother at the age of 11 or 12. You're a CHILD!!! Why would you want to do that?! Why would you be having sex at that age?!

Breathe.

Anycase.. so now this 23-year-old grandmother's mother is a great-grandmother at the mere age of 40. That's younger than my own mother. Which by the way also means that this must kind of run in the family because the 23-year-old must have been born when her mother (the now great-grandmother) was in her teens as well. Am I confusing you? You're not alone.

My mind is not advanced enough to quite comprehend all of this. I'm young myself, and suddenly I feel old. I feel like I want to say things like 'In my day this and this and that...', 'When I was that age...' or 'The kids of today...'

I still feel like a kid myself. As much as I want to find The One, get married and do the picket fence, dogs and kids thing - I know I'm not ready for any of it. I will be able to do it now, sure. But that doesn't mean I'm ready. I don't want to be ready yet, either. I like being a kid at heart. I like doing my own thing and not having that much of a responsibility. I like being me, and not Mommy, at my age. I like playing with other people's kids and being able to give them back when they scream or shit themselves. Not.My.Problem.

When I was 11 I was still climbing trees, playing hide and seek and house-house and jumping rope and I'm pretty sure I was convinced boys had cooties. How do you even know how to have sex at that age? Do they see it in movies that their parents don't censor? Do they see their parents doing it? Do they hear about it from their friends? How is it possible that they even have those kinds of hormones at that age? I didn't have them. And if I did they sure as hell were dormant! The way they're supposed to be.

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About Me

I am a daughter, an aunt, a confidant, a best friend. I am a fighter, a brunette, a lover, a nerd, a lasting impression. I am a stubborn ass, a smart ass, a cute ass, a pain in the ass. I am a cowgirl, a sports fan, a music fanatic, a writer. I am a wanderer, a homebody, a talker, a hermit. I am a port in life's storm, an unfinished story, a mystery. I am a winner, a loser, a sinner, a God-believer. I am a worker, a doer, an achiever, a promise-keeper. I am a vision, a horizon image, a last-minute decision. I am a life-saver, a traffic-stopper, a world-shaker. I am a quiet night, a warm smile, a spirit-lifter. I am a smoky fire, a wink of the eye, a home. And while I firmly believe I am a better me than anyone could ever be, why do I feel like the girl on bended knee that no one can see?