Sunday, November 25, 2012

A year has passed with almost no updates on the exciting changes that had since taken place in my life. I know I'd bore you with the lame excuse of not having enough time and that I have been immersed with ongoings of the real life (since this is virtual :P). But today, inspiration is all abound as I reflected my life since I had written here back in March 2011.

I am currently a wife to a doting husband and yes, I learnt that life works in mysterious ways. I have also been taught gently that Love is possible and ever so precious after going through hardships and downfalls. My husband, Rusyaidi Husni Abdul Latib, who is a proud self-proclaimed kampong boy, hails from Seremban (not so kampong, you say?). We met through a mutual friend, Rijal whom I have not met since 2006. One night in June 2011, I just randomly decided to ask Rijal to hang out in Bangsar and Rusy just happened to tag along. One thing led to another and after 2 weeks, Rusy and I were already planning to get married! Not so long after that, we got hitched on 10th March 2012, about 9 months after knowing each other.

Why so impulsive, you may ask? I, for one, was one of those sceptics who would never buy it if I was told that you can decide to marry a person whom you've just met 10 days ago. I used to think that marriage is a huge deal that must be dealt with really well and pondered upon heavily. I used to be so scared of the notion of spending your life with someone you barely know, thinking that the misunderstandings would definitely be frequent. Yet, there was something about my husband and I that just seems to click. I was not pretentious with him and neither did we hide under any kind of projected image that we thought the other would like. He told me things that he liked or disliked and I was quite struck at how calm I was listing down all his ideas :p

I could still remember my mother's reaction to it. Her daughter would never made a rushed decision, so she looked me into the eye and asked me this; "Dah fikir dalam-dalam ke?" or "Have you given it a deep thought?". I guess any mother would ask the same to her child who suddenly alerts her on the news that her daughter would like to wed a man whom she had just known for 14 days. I am sure my mother in-law was equally baffled when my husband relayed the news to her. But I took just a couple of minutes to succintly explain that we have given it the deepest thought and that we would like our feelings to be realised into a lawful relationship. Not sure if my husband took longer than that, though.. hahaha.

But one thing for sure, I am confident that I have met my soulmate, my match for this world and the afterlife. A man who guides me ever so steadily and reminds me to be a better person on a daily basis. I have been blessed with a great in-laws to add to my already colourful family. A sense of elation blooms in my heart every single time I think and reflect on how lucky I am everyday that I am a wife to him. Alhamdulillah.

It is never easy losing a parent. When
I was a mere 12 year old kid in primary school, I had lost my beloved
mother in a car accident. Usually, my dad would pick me up but since
he was bogged down with work, mother decided to do so even though she
was a novice driver. While we were on our usual route back from my
school, a young boy who was deeply engrossed in his ice-cream
abruptly crossed the road at a busy intersection. My mother tried to
avoid from running over the boy but she skidded into a line of stalls
nearby.

Miraculously, I was saved without a
single scratch as mum had cast her protective arms over me during the
collision. While we were trapped in the car, I could see a deep cut
on her forehead but she still managed to smile at me, probably to let
me know that everything will be alright. Just as she was about to say
something, she drew her last breath and at that very instant, she was
gone. When the paramedics arrived, she had already died due to
internal bleeding and a severe skull fracture.

After that traumatic experience, I
found it hard to not blame myself and my father for losing her. I
felt useless and helpless as I could not save my own mother when she
needed me. I admonished my father for not picking me up and causing
mother to die. I started to become rebellious and nonchalant towards
life when I moved on to secondary school. My demeanour changed as I
wrecked up problems regularly at school, causing my father to be at
wit's end to control me. This went on for 2 years until an incident
changed my life thoroughly.

One cold, starless night, I stormed
out from my home towards a nearby deserted basketball court after
having a squabble with my father. The peaceful surrounding there
would always provide me tranquility that I needed, since I did not
have close friends to confide in at school. I started shooting a
raggedy basketball half-heartedly into the ring as I recalled how my
father was continuously putting pressure on me to excel in my
studies. Why wouldn't he understand my ordeal? How can I study when
my mind was always thinking about my mother? He did not understand my
loss and I thought to myself that he never will. He was just
interested in work and never spent time with me, anyway. Not the way
mum did.

After about thirty tries, I was
exhausted and took a rest on the rickety bench when I noticed
something glimmering in the sky. It seemed to be approaching closer
as I was growing fixated on it! It darted towards the cornfield
surrounding the court and upon reaching the surface, it disappeared
without a spectacle.

“What on earth is that?” I
murmured to myself in disbelief.

My curiosity went overboard as I raced
through the cornfield to find the source of the blinding light. As I
neared a particularly empty spot, I saw an odd looking plate-shaped
flying object hovering over a crop circle. It landed right at the
centre of the circle and a door opened leading two beings creeping
out from the entrance. They looked hilarious to me: their heads were
humongous with a pair of large black eyes complemented with thick,
blistering red lips. Awkwardly so, their bodies seemed too tiny to
support their heads as their languid long limbs were just the size of
a 10 year old child. I could not contain my laughter when I realised
that they were undressed and their skin was a ridiculous hue of pink.

The aliens who were alerted with my
presence zapped right in front of me in the speed of light. One of
them extended its three-fingered palm as a sign of peace and after
hesitating for a while, I received its hand that seemed ice cold.
They invited me onto the spaceship and as if being drugged, I agreed.
The insides of the ship were even more fascinating- just like the
ones I had seen on television. But a huge monitor caught my attention
as it displayed similar beings like the aliens dying in dire straits.
One of the aliens communicated to me by typing on a screen that earth
is causing harm to their life.

They went on to explain that a
particularly new and covertly operating nuclear reactor in Nebraska
was causing harm to their race. The nuclear had been emitting
radiation that was not dangerous to humankind but deadly to theirs.
Even though it was dangerous, they had traveled across the universe
in the radiation-proof ship just to save their people. It did not
make perfect sense to me but I knew that I had to assist them in the
name of humanity. I quickly browsed the maps application in my phone
and it directed us to a reactor that was thirty thousand miles away.
They took a look at the map and in just a second, we arrived at the
site. As we did, the aliens positioned the ship exactly above the
reactor and emitted a beam that supposedly shielded the radiated
waves from reaching their frontiers.

Still being in a state of disbelief,
both of the aliens communicated to me that they were exalted since
the mission was complete after the beam had successfully fulfilled
its duty. They wanted to grant any wish that I had and after
pondering a while, I told them that I wanted to know what my mother
wanted to say before she passed on. They configured something on the
monitor and after a fizzle, the monitor zoomed to the site where the
accident took place. I regretted asking for such a wish as my heart
was choking with sadness. But then, I heard my mum's whispering voice
from within her heart,

“Azrul, I am sorry that I am leaving
you earlier. Please promise me that you will never blame yourself and
you will make me proud. Always help others and do not be selfish.
Always take care of yourself and your father too. He may seem hard on
the outside but he is a tender person. He loves you. I LOVE YOU.”

Then, she drew her last breath.

My tears flowed down like a cascading
waterfall and I truly felt remorse for all of my actions. I held my
face in my hands as I wept tears of regret for not respecting my
father all this while even though he was suffering. One of the aliens
beings placed its hand on my shoulder as another typed out on the
monitor:

“Your mother must be so proud of
you. You are a good human being and you can change yourself”.

As the sun was about to rise, they
dropped me off at my door step and bid farewell before shooting off
to the sky almost instantly. I dashed into the house and hugged
father who was waiting for me in his reading chair. He hugged me back
tight and without a single word, we knew that things will be better.
Surprisingly, I had learnt the value of humanity and selflessness
from extra terrestrial beings who are much braver than me. I thanked
God that I was chosen for such a heavy task and since then, I had
changed my ways into becoming a better son, student and ultimately, a
human.

In The Pineapple is

I write because I love to *I don't expect you to agree with me although respecting my perspective would definitely help* *I think we are all born to bring a difference to the world, so choose what you wanna change* *Don't just succumb to the masses because you deserve a niche* *Admitting yourself on the spontaneous express is essential*
*Let your love come out if you believe*