Friday, October 29, 2004

Proving the old theory that you never really leave high school behind, I just found out that my Odessa High School Broncos have defeated their perennial rivals, the Permian Panthers. In the past 40+ years this has only happened twice, the last time back in 1997.

That's right, the "Friday Night Lights" Permian Panthers. I was only in grade school when 'the book'[as it's commonly referred] came out, so I only have vague memories of the events. I can say the book served as a mirror, and showed some things that the town didn't like. A couple of losing seasons helped people gain some perspective, and while perfect social justice in West Texas is far off [as it is everywhere] every little bit helps.

Odessa is still a football town though, complete with its own 19,000 seat stadium in the middle of nowhere. I still check in on occasion to see how the Broncos are doing, and my folks still go to a couple of games a year.

Some More Citizens of the Churn Nation:

clu.edu:As far as I can tell, this is a link to California Lutheran University. Go Kingsmen!

Lockheed Martin:I'm slightly chilled that someone is slacking off from designing some new missile system to look for pictures of the overstock.com girl.

I'm just kidding of course. All members of Churn Nation are well-spoken, intelligent, desirable to the opposite sex, and have minty fresh breath. Recommend this site to others, that they may share in the joy of belonging to Churn Nation.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

With The WWE's first 'interactive' PPV in the books, I had to guess not only what the WWE bookers would do, but also what the fans would decide.

Winners:

Gene Snitsky:
I can't explain it, but this guy has somehow become a major heel in the Raw roster. While I thought that his final stand would have been at Taboo Tuesday, he surprised me and I suspect a lot of the fans when he destroyed Kane in the 'Choose Your Weapon Match'. I did guess incorrectly at the choice of weapon [chain] but the WWE still used the steel chair at the match's conclusion. Until Kane puts him away for good, he's a permanent member of Team Churn. 61 points.

Eugene:
I admit, I wasn't a fan of this character at first, but the idea of a wrestling savant began to grow on me, and I enjoy his tributes to wrestlers of the past. While this will never happen, I wish that somehow, Eugene would get hit on the head during a match and become 'normal'. Unfortunately, he would forget how to wrestle. He would then have to choose which life to lead. The only question I had about his match with Bischoff was if the fans chose the shaved head or the dress [shaved head won]. 28 points.

Christy and Stacy Keibler:
Both of these Divas saw action at the PPV. Christy faced her nemisis Carmella, and Stacy was in a Diva Battle Royal. In the past, a woman in the WWE had few choices. either she was a manager, valet/girlfriend, or in the rare case, an actual wrestler. Now, the WWE expects every woman to fill all of those roles. For my part, I don't care if 80% of the women in the WWE never wrestle a match. Just come to the ring in something short/flimsy/transparent wave to the folks, and leave. Now, I wouldn't rule out the occasional pudding match. 23 points each.

Carlito Caribbean Cool and Mark Jindrak:
I didn't focus too much on Smackdown because of the RAW PPV, but these two did serve me well. At a million dollars each, both will be Team Churn members for a while. 18 points each.

Losers:

Billy Kidman, Luther Reigns, Tyson Tomko and Val Venis earned a grand total of 6 points. the less said the better.

A quick hello to the guys visiting from Northwestern, UConn, and Stanford domains. I say guys since all three users were looking for info on Sabine Ehrenfeld.

If you guys are students, I have to believe there's something better you can do with your time. Go challenge the cool frat to a series of wacky contests. Steal another school's mascot. By the way, did I forget to mention that %99 of all my knowledge comes from cable tv?

If those readers turn out to be teachers...way to earn that salary, I guess.

Thursday, October 21, 2004

Wives and Girlfriends all across Boston are breathing a sigh of relief as the Red Sox made history by coming back after losing three straight games to the Yankees. Above, Gabe Kapler and Johnny Damon discuss matters while making an unintentional reference to the last Time the Sox won a World Series. Thanks to Boston.com for the pic.

On the Raw side, I've got 5 wrestlers that Will have a match at Taboo Tuesday, which means points regardless if they win or lose. Smackdown's a bit of a writeoff, but there's some point potential. As of right now, I'm either tied for or in 930th place, which isn't that bad.

For better or worse[I'm still hedging my bets], here's the cast for the Fantastic Four movie. As much as I love Jessica Alba, I still can't see her as Sue Storm/Richards. Also, I would have preferred a more massive Thing, but that probably would have neccessitated more CGI. As far as Mr. Fantastic and Johnny Storm go, I don't have any real complaints. If what I've been hearing about Dr. Doom is true though...well, it won't be pretty. Credit to SuperHero Hype! for the pic.

Saturday, October 16, 2004

As another week slowly passes us by, it's time for a Churn Exclusive: Fantasy Wrestling Analysis. Don't worry, it'll all be over soon.

Winners:

Carlito Caribbean Cool:Once again, the WWE's monster push of Carlito proved to be very profitable as he successfully defended the US title against Rey Mysterio. Carlito's become one of my regular picks due to his bargain basement price. 34 points.

Billy Kidman: In the past few weeks, Kidman's persona has taken a darker and more entertaining turn since his in-ring incident where he injured Chavo Guerrero with his Shooting Star Press. 31 points.

Sylvain Grenier: It seems that the WWE is determined to keep the Tag Team Title Belts on La Resistance. Unfortunately I got on board a few weeks too early. 31 points.

Losers:

It's an all RAW edition of losers for this week. Christy, Shelton Benjamin, and Gene Snitsky amassed a grand total of 3 points. but considering that two of them have matches on Taboo Tuesday, I'll probably keep them on.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

I'd like to start today's post by saying thanks to all the new visitors to my humble blog. I know 95% of the queries involve Sabine Ehrenfeld, but I hope that even after the Net moves on to the next spokesmodel, you'll come back every now and again.

I'd like to give a hearty congratulations to Big Dick Hunter, who as of last night is engaged to be married. Everyone here at Churn wishes them only the best, and between you, me and well...The internet, his fiancee is smokin'. More news as updates keep coming in.

And finally, if you're looking to join a CD club, research your family history, buy some coffee, or subscribe to The New York Times, why not click here first? Not only will you get a good deal, you'll also help me get an Ipod.

Yeah, it's a bit crass, but if I get an Ipod, I can use it to drown out my conscience.

As you can see, I'm stretching my fantasy wrestling dollar. Next week, I'll do another quick winners and losers segment.

And speaking of being frugal, I've got a question. Thanks to the folks at
Cheap Stingy Bast@rd, I got a sweet[75% off!]deal on some dvds. Now, since an unwrapped DVD looks like any other DVD, I'm wondering if someone could 'return' it to one of the many retail establishments in their neck of the woods. My question is: could someone do this, and if they could, where would they stand the best chance of pulling this off? Of course, this is a completely hypothetical situation, as I would never even consider doing anything illegal or unethical. Please comment below with any responses.

Saturday, October 09, 2004

Carlito Caribbean Cool:This was just pure luck. I knew he would be debuting on Smackdown and possibly getting a win over a jobber, but I had no idea he would win the US Championship. For the insane roster price of 1,000,000, Carlito earned me 50 points.

Christian:
Even though he lost in his heavily hyped match with HBK, he still got in enough offense to rack up 14 points.

Mark Jindrak:His recent alliance with Kurt Angle has increased Jindrak's visibility a hundredfold. Another million dollar price tag with a return of 11 points this week.

Losers:

Booker T:

My strategy regarding Booker had him retaking the US Title in a rematch this week, but instead he mildly threatens Orlando Jordan. Here's a quick math problem: if Booker T costs 4,500,000 and earns 3 points in a week, and Orlando Jordan costs 2,500,00 and earns 6 points in that same week, what's stopping me from jumping off of a water tower for being such a dork?

Sorry about that.

The WWE's making a tour of the UK next week, which might affect how I plan my roster. as always, you'll be the first to know.

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Ok, I saw Shark Tale earlier today, and while I think that Dreamworks can't hold a candle to the films that come out of Pixar, it had a few funny scenes. Getting Martin Scorcese and Robert De Niro to play fish was a bit of genius.

What troubled me was the director's idea to integrate the soundtrack artists into the film.

The soundtrack's website features the different artists as sea life i.e fish, seahorses and such.

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

I'm too tired to even comment ironically on this story. Before the cameras roll however, Woo will have to finish directing The Rock in Spy Hunter, based on the video game. A game that had no characters, human or otherwise.

Monday, October 04, 2004

With No Mercy this Sunday, I had hoped to make up some ground on Bro. Mike, and if it wasn't for the aforementioned Mr. London, I would have. As it stands right now, I'm currently in 2004th place with 216 points. This week, I'm going back to a more balanced roster; RAW stars in red, Smackdown in blue.

As you can see, I really raided the bargain basement this time around. My biggest gambles are Christy and Carlito Cool, since Christy's only been on tv for a week now, and hasn't technically been in a match, and Carlito's only been in vignettes, which I believe don't count towards points. AS Churn goes to press, these picks should stay the same, but I can make changes till 8pm.

Also, in a change from the usual schedule, I'll be on the P1WAC tonight discussing No Mercy, and perhaps some Fantasy wrestling talk. Please tune in to 1310AM or go to The Ticket's website to listen online.

Saturday, October 02, 2004

It seems like someone's mounted a challenge to Erica Durance's supremacy in supplying links to this site.

Ms. Overstock, Sabine Ehrenfeld has been raking in the referrals recently. While I doubt the new campaign will do much for cheap books and DVDs, I am convinced that by this time next week, we'll know more about Miss Ehrenfeld than we would ever care to.

But all bets are off if Erica Durance shows up in any 'unfortunate' home videos.

Friday, October 01, 2004

First off, I thought that President Bush disrespected the whole process at the very beginning. Arriving at the debate venue in a fur coat surrounded by exotic dancers isn't very presidential. Also, his solid gold goblet[complete with "G-Dub" spelled out in diamond] on the podium was very distracting.

Senator Kerry didn't fare much better. I'm sure his handlers thought that crashing in through the ceiling on a jetpack would convey a sense of leadership. It came across as unnecessary, and the resulting debris cloud obscured the first 12 minutes.

And while I thought Jim Lehrer did an admirable job of moderating the debate, at times I felt he was too strident. Yes, Kerry did go over his alotted time for one of his responses, but that was no reason for Mr. Lehrer to break his finger and threaten to kill his children if it happened again.

The presentation left me scratching my head. I'm no prude, and I understand the need to attract an audience, but I question the use of the Man Show's Juggies as 'halftime entertainment'.

Overall, I felt that Senator Kerry won this particular debate. I don't condone his use of a taser, but it's hard lose a debate when your opponent is unconcious and twitching.

As I understand it, the next debate is due to take place in a 20-foot tall steel cage.