Bollywood stars Abhishek Bachchan and Aishwarya Rai will be married next week. Hopefully, they won’t piss off India the way Elizabeth Vomit-ey did with her wedding shenanigans. Bachchan, left, and “Ash,” right, are pictured below:

And those Bollywood nightsIn those Bollywood hillsShe was looking so rightIn her diamonds and frillsAll those big city nightsIn those high rolling hillsAbove all the lightsHe had on a headband that killed