Frosty the Ice Queen was an unremorseful ho
With her corn hole piped and a button nose
and her heart was made of coal
Frosty the Ice Queen is a fairy tale they say
Said she wouldnít go but the children
know how she ruined our lives that day
There must have been some magic in that
jimmy hat they found
For when they placed it on his head
They began to fool around
O
Frosty the Ice Queen
was alive as she could be
And she justified all the hurt and lies
while she blamed that shit on me
Thumpity thump thump
thumpity thump thump
Look at Ice Queen go
Thumpity thump thump
thumpity thump thump
Out of the house you ho
Frosty the Ice Queen knew
that I was hot that day
So she said
"Iíll run and
I'll have some fun
and your heart will melt away
" Down to the village
with her ring not on her hand
Running here and there all
around the square saying
Catch me if you can
She ran around the streets of town
looking for some cock
And he only paused a moment when
She heard me holler "Stop!"
For Frosty the Ice Queen
had to hurry on her way
But she waved goodbye saying
"Don't you cry
I'll regret this all some day
" thumpity thump thump
thumpity thump thump
Look at Frosty go
thumpity thump thump
thumpity thump thump
Out of the house you ho

This is kind of an easy one as I didn't have to change a lot of the words as they are perfect in describing most AP's just as is. I consider this a Christmas song because it is a tradition at our house to watch "The Grinch Who Stole Christmas" every year.

My rendition of the Mr. Grinch song is as follows:

You're a mean one, Ms. Wench
You really are a heel,
You're as cuddly as a cactus, you're as charming as an eel, Ms. Wench,
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel!

You're a monster, Ms. Wench,
Your heart's an empty hole,
Your crotch is full of spiders, you have harlot in your soul, Ms. Wench,
Why would anyone touch you without a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole!

You're a foul one, Ms. Wench,
You have termites in your smile,
You have all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Ms. Wench,
Given a choice between the two of you I'ld take the seasick crocodile!

You nauseate me, Ms. Wench,
With a nauseous super "naus"!,
You're a wicked dirty yucky and you thrive on fucking boss, Ms. Wench,
Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful
assortment of rubbish imaginable mangled up in tangled up knots!

You're a foul one, Ms. Wench,
You're a nasty wasty wank,
Your mouth is full of unwashed cocks, your soul is full of dank, Ms. Wench,
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote,
"Stink, stank, skank"!

Baby, your clothesíre outside.
Baby, theyíre frozen outside.
I chucked them in those garbage bags.
You spent the evening with that ho-man
You didnít care that we were alone.
So you can turn around and go, man,
And call her on your secret cell phone.

You really can't stay
so baby, it's cold outside.

Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks

Posts: 8071 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Toronto, Canada

HFSSC♀ 33338Member # 33338

Posted: 9:45 AM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013

This was my submission in 2011. Enjoy!

Away with a stranger
A car for a bed.
My husband f*ed somebody
Else intead.
He loves me, he means it
But why oh why?
Is my radar pinging
With all of his lies?

The cow-skank is lowing
The poor baby wakes.
And my wayward husband
Keeps making "mistakes".
He's sorry, he means it
He'll tell her goodbye.
And stay with me only
Till judgment is nigh.

Me, 48
Him, 41 (JMSSC)
married 18 years. In R. We are making it. The past does not define who we are today.

Posts: 3338 | Registered: Sep 2011 | From: South Carolina

lynnm1947♀ 15300Member # 15300

Posted: 10:20 AM, December 12th (Thursday), 2013

Have yourself a merry little fuckfest.
Iíve just let you go.
From now on, youíre living with your ugly ho.
Have yourself a jolly little fuckfest.
Break your marriage vows.
From now on, youíre gonna have to face some rows.

Have yourself a merry little fuckfest.
Iíll divorce your butt.
From now on, youíre trailer living with that slut.
Have yourself a jolly little fuckfest.
Gonna get the house.
From now on, you will be very poor, you louse!

Here we are, not like olden days, happy family days before.
This year, you wonít be living here. Youíve been with your whore.

SoÖ off you go, go on now, Mr. Dickhead.
What the hellójust git!
Youíre homeless? Well, I really just donít give a shit!
Iíll have myself a merry little Christmas now.

Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks