ANN DEMATTEO: At a time when light was most needed, there was Robin Roberts

Ann DeMatteo, Middletown Press Managing Editor

Published 12:00 am, Saturday, February 23, 2013

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Ann DeMatteo

Ann DeMatteo

ANN DEMATTEO: At a time when light was most needed, there was Robin Roberts

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Mortality.

How do you face it? Slowly.

I'm back at the St. Raphael campus of Yale-New Haven Hospital. I slipped off a chair at home last Sunday and slid onto the floor. Guys from the Hamden Fire Department brought me to the hospital where I ended up in the ICU for two days before being moved to a sub-acute care unit. It turns out I had low blood pressure.

This trip to the hospital has caused me to take a hard look at my illness. It's easy to say there's nothing wrong, but I am truly sick. I'm having trouble breathing. I guess I really don't know how to handle it, because it's just something that is unbelievable to me. I'm 56 years old.

I have so many things to do. I have so many stories to write; news stories and columns. I want to play with and guide the kids: John and Rebecca.

This is the saddest column I've written because ... (at this point, Ann raised her right hand and, using her index finger, she motioned in the air "dot, dot, dot," choosing not to finish the sentence verbally).

Do your best to take care of yourself. Exercise, eat right, get lots of sleep. These are things I never did.

Some people are very courageous in the face of adversity. Look at Robin Roberts. I watched a little of her return to "Good Morning America" Wednesday on TV after a 174-day absence. She was recuperating from her bone marrow transplant to treat a rare blood disorder that resulted from the chemotherapy treatment she received after her breast cancer diagnosis in 2007.

The outpouring of love and support for her was amazing. She deserved it. She is a beacon of light. I wish I could be like her. Maybe I am to some, and I will continue to try to be. I was glad to see Robin back on TV Wednesday because, for cancer survivors, she is an inspiration and an example of survivorship.

People need to know there is hope. People need to know they can survive. People need to know they can rally. People need to know there's life to live for. Robin inspires me and reminds me that I need to keep on trying.

I'm trying to rally, but it isn't easy because of my condition. And being in the hospital is uncomfortable. I want to go home. At press time, I am still in the hospital but I'm hoping to be home by the time you read this.

Life in the hospital is a mixed bag of television, bed pans, noise, distractions and wondering why "The Bachelor" didn't pick Tierra (although Ann told her night nurse Andrea that she was glad Sean didn't pick her because Tierra was not a very nice person). It's also hard to fall asleep because there is so much activity. When you're in the hospital, there are always interruptions. Now I'm getting a blood draw and getting medication through an IV line. (Ann was ribbing her afternoon nurse Kathleen).

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As I continue to battle this dread disease I am also strengthened by all the prayers and support from you. To all who sent gifts and Mass cards and greeting cards, thank you. Much appreciated.

Friend Meg Barone helped Ann write this column. Former longtime Hamden and North Haven reporter for the Register, Ann DeMatteo, is the managing editor of The Middletown Press.