“For some time after it I used to worry about what people thought, until one day Jesus spoke to me and said, ‘Gary, most people don’t even know who they are, let alone who you are, so why should you worry about what they think?’

I missed this one on election day, but one of my mates actually got handed a how to vote card from Kev when he went to vote – apparently whoever was handing out these HTVs were as pissed as crickets before lunch.

Western Australia, the gleaming light of liberalism that it is, is the only Australian state that issues Tasers to all general duty Police officers. That’s 1,500 Tasers issued to WA Police, who as we all know are hardlysoberrationalists at the best of times.

I went into the election planning on preferencing Keenan, but after collecting all the HTV cards from those who were giving them out, Labor was putting me 3rd and the Liberals 4th. So I went tit-for-tat and gave my preference to Tinley.

In the end though, Michael Keenan got up.

Hopefully he’s not a shapeshifting lizard. If he is, I promise to preference the CEC next time.