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Master of Orion: Birdmageddon

(This is part of my journey playing through Master of Orion. You can follow the entire series on the Nostalgia Lanes page.)

Ysharros is fallen. My fleet is ragged and bloody. Yet still I persist, still my factories of war crank out engines of doom. And I have Ion Rifles.

First things first today: I need faster ships. The Stropps are nice and all, but they’ve got the slow engines and take way too long to build. So I pull up the ship design screen and come up with the KTR:

I love ship design in this game. It’s simple yet has choices. What you really have to consider when making a new ship is how much it’ll cost (which determines how long it takes for a planet to make one) and your space budget.

The KTR is a medium ship, so its space budget is limited — but far, far better than small ships. I settle for a Class I shield even though I have a Class II and Titanium I armor instead of Titanium II. In exchange for these concessions, I can fit on the new nuclear engines and a wide range of weapons including rockets, lasers, and bombs. It’s going to be a little more fragile than I’d like, but I’m hoping that sheer numbers, a versatile usage, and a harder punch will make up for it.

On the first turn, I pump out 40 of the new ships. Ooo, this is going to be fun.

A stroke of good luck follows:

Hey, I’ll take it. I need all the edge I can get right now. This is followed by the Sakkra ambassador coming to my doorstep and asking if we can stop the war. Like you guys have been able to do anything in that department at all in the past 30 turns, but OK, fine. That’s one less faction that’s trying to bring me down right now.

I’m sure you’re thinking, “So what are you going to do about Ysharros? Are you going to let that travesty stand?” No, I am not, but it’s taking me a bit of time to put together a counter-invasion. The problem is that the Alkari keep sending in wave after wave of ships at me, and I need to keep my fleet together to fend them off.

An absolutely massive fleet battle breaks out over Ocho:

My ships hold up really well, although there are casualties on both sides. While I send the Alkari packing, a few of their large ships bomb Ocho. Well, it turns out that that was enough to fully destroy the colony and leave me holding nothing.

That’s right: Ocho is no more.

I make Psychochild my new front-line base, shifting my production to send ships there, and create a new colony ship to go to Ocho. I also send two smaller fleets to converge upon Ysharros, which right now is only lightly guarded. Syp ain’t taking this lying down, no sirree.

Birdmageddon is upon us, my friends. My fleet arrives at Ysharros and kicks the everloving crud out of the Alkari. It’s obvious that I’m enjoying a slightly higher tech level, because my ships are standing up to fire quite admirably while cutting through the enemy. Taking back the airspace, I bomb all but 2 of the population and then order Psychochild to send 30 transports that way.

Over on the now-dead Ocho, an even bigger miracle happens: A very large Alkari fleet arrives right as most of my fleet had left. The enemy has a colony ship, so they’re obviously looking to nab it. All I have is 30 or so KTRs that have trickled in, yet they go on a rampage, smacking large ships left and right, and losing only about 4 of their own number in the end. It’s just… glorious.

Meanwhile, the Alkari haven’t given up on Ysharros — they keep sending bad guys to the slaughter.

Yeahhh… that’ll go well for you. Idiots.

My troops then land on Ysharros and take it with ease. It’s the first enemy planet of the game that I’ve taken, and it’s given me a taste for more. Time to push an offensive and take the fight to these space-bound avians.

A couple of failed counter-strikes by the Alkari against Ysharros later, and I’m treated to this delicious sight:

THAT’S RIGHT. GROVEL! GROVEL BEFORE YOUR MASTER! FLEE! FLEE YOU CHICKENS! YOU PROBABLY ARE CHICKENS BUT THAT DOESN’T DETRACT FROM MY INSULT!

Yeah, I’ll take the peace treaty… for now. Give me a few turns of “peace” to ready my forces, and the Alkari are going to regret everything they’ve ever done. Stupid fictional computer race.

What is it about computer based Empire building that any normal person takes a massive affront to being invaded that can only be sated by the annihilation of the aggressor? I had the same thing when I played Alpha Centauri. Attack me first and then pay the price with your utter destruction later.