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just checking in with everyone.

sorry have not been around lately. had severe bout of flu and took 5 lots of antibiotics to clear chest have had use inhalers. everything has got to me and I have had a nervous breakdown. which has caused me to flare severe. have had to be put on anti depressants. and my endone has been increased .I cannot stop shaking and am crying all the time. cannot even speak to my own children as there problems have been a major cause of my breakdown. I luv them but have been advised to distance myself from them for awhile to get a rest. but my mother has been very mean to me and has told me I am being selfish and my children should come first she has sent me lots of abusive texts as well as ring and abuse me. she also rang me up one morning and told me my son may have overdosed and it was my fault. turns out he had not he was only trying to hurt me again. and she still blamed me and took him out and bought him things. she enables them all the time and when something goes wrong she expects me to pick up the pieces. and is annoyed that I cannot. be there and she does not want the responsibility of what she has created.i am feeling sad and lost right now.

The Following User Says Thank You to Nonna For This Useful Post:

Kim, don't take blame for your children's behavior. They have choices in the course of actions that they take. All we can do is try to guide them in making the right choices in life. I am truly sorry that you are going through the trials and tribulations that you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Kim;
It sounds as if you also need to distance yourself from your mother. You are not responsible for the choices that your children make and should not feel guilty about it. It is not your job to be or do what your mother thinks you should be or do. She needs to take responsibility for herself and stop causing you stress and heartache.
If your children and your mother are becoming toxic to your health, then you need to distance yourself from all of them until your health is under control. Then, only allow them back in as much as you feel it is not harmful to you. They must learn to deal with you ON YOUR TERMS..not the other way around. Your life and your health are of utmost importance and it is imperative that you take steps to preserve them!
I am sending you warm hugs of understanding

thankyou all for your kind thoughts and replies I have to think of myself first for change. my health is not the best at the moment and everyday is a fight to get out of bed and go on with my life.i am seeing phycologist today. my gp wants me to go away for awhile so I can relax and recooperate.am thinking about it seriously. luv to all my internet family.