Lesbros: Josh Kane

The trusty website, UrbanDictionary.com, has several definitions for the term lesbro:

1. A man who has more friendships with lesbians than other women or men.

2. The male equivalent of a fag hag.

3. A heterosexual man who is either one or both of the following: a brother to one or more lesbian sisters, or, friends with a disproportionate amount of homosexual women. “Wow, your brother really only hangs out with gay girls, doesn’t he! And you’re a big gay yourself, sister! What a lesbro you’ve got there!”

To us, a lesbro is a little bit of all, but at his core, a lesbro is a male friend to at least one, but possibly several, lesbians. This column shares a little bit about some famous lesbros that we love.

This week’s Lesbro: Josh Kane.

Josh Kane is a former child actor, having starred in more than 40 national commercials for brands like Cheerios, Pizza Hut, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Sewer Hockey and Cascade dishwasher detergent. Then he turned to theater and TV work before becoming a professional drummer. In the last 12 years, Josh has drummed live for Shania Twain, on Pink’s album Funhouse, and toured with Uh Huh Her.

AfterEllen.com: Of the above three definitions of a lesbro, which do you think describes you best?

JK: Number 1?

AE: What is the best thing about your lesbian friend/s?

JK: The best thing about my lesbian friends is diversity, being able to talk about chicks with other chicks, and we share a common love for music.

AE: Do you think that having lesbian friends has anything to do with where you fall on the Kinsey scale? Care to comment on your own sexuality?

JK: I’m a zero on the Kinsey scale, but my lesbian tendencies are equally as strong as yours.

AE: What stereotype about lesbians have you found to be false?

JK: A stereotype about lesbians I have found to be false is that all lesbians hate men and find them completely un-appealing. However, the lesbian community in general is very cliquey and cold and it takes a lot to gain acceptance, whether you’re a man or a woman. I only bring this up to remind all of you that equality and open-mindedness goes both ways. Not every guy in the world is there just to stare at you, hoping to catch a glimpse of you and your girlfriend making out and invite them to join in.

On the flipside, not every woman thinks you’re a bull dyke with hairy pits and no self-esteem. Please, stop treating anything that doesn’t resemble another lesbian or household pet like a d–k with ears. It’s rude, and severely judgmental.

AE: What do you think it is specifically that draws you towards being friends with lesbians?

JK: What draws me to hanging out with lesbians, specifically? UHH played a big part in that, since almost every lesbian in the world knows who they are. Come to a show and we’ll sign your stuff after. I promise. Since then, I sorta learned to ride the wave and go where the party is. Lesbians party a lot in LA, and they dig my personality and how I drum. It’s a win/win situation.

AE: How has your girlfriend (or past girlfriends if you are not in a relationship now) responded to your friendships with lesbians?

JK: Past girlfriends find my deep involvement in the worldwide lesbian community amusing, totally amazing, shockingly coincidental and occasionally uncomfortable. I had one gf who expressed minor concerns that perhaps some of my lesbian friends act “more than friends” and “less than lesbian” when we hang out, but I have little to do with that.

Gay, straight — whatever! I’m a humble bro to all who embrace the positive and believe every man and woman on this earth is capable of finding true happiness in every minute of the day. All the people in my life contribute something to my personal happiness with diversity, unique perspective and personal life choices that embody the courage and endurance of the human heart. I hope to learn as much as I can from all of it and, ideally, contribute to their journey for happiness too in whatever way I can.

Ultimately, if a woman wants strings attached with me, she might benefit from investing in some very long strings and provide a generous measure of slack in the line. I keep to the code of bros before hos, the only difference being that most of my bros have boobs.

AE: How did you meet and start playing with UHH?

JK: Since I moved to LA, my goal was to build a solid network of talented, working musicians and artists. When UHH was auditioning drummers, I heard about it through a friend of a friend, both of whom are also incredibly talented drummers but were committed to other projects at the time. My friend forwarded me the audition info and the music, and the rest is rock n roll.

AE: Pink is a big supporter of Human Rights and gay rights in particular, were you ever witness to this? What was it like working with her?

JK: Being a professional musician is a funny thing. When Al Clay, one of P!nk’s long time producers called me in for the Funhouse sessions, I had no idea I was going in to record for Pink. Al needed a drummer, and I was honored he thought enough of me to come be a part of his project, so of course I said “F–k Yeah!”. Al produced Common Reaction, the first full length UHH record, and at that time was still heavily involved behind the scenes with the band, so that’s how we ended up working together.

I showed up, he played me the scratch tracks with rough vocals already recorded as a guide, and we just nailed it. That’s how it is with a lot of recording artists these days who hire cats and just send them the rough edit, and say “Here, lay down drums in your studio and email it back to me.” Its the musician’s job to give the producer a performance that accomodates his or her vision of how the song should sound and feel. Then the artist(s) decides if it works or not, and ultimately if it belongs on the album. So, that’s how I got my first credits on a platinum record. Never met Pink, and I never played the songs again after that day. Like I said, being a professional musician is a funny thing.