Zitate und Sprüche von Marshall Eriksen

Marshall: 'Robin, I need you to delete the last text that Lily got before she sees it.'
Robin: 'Bro, it's my wedding weekend. Just because you didn't know better than to take a naked selfie while you were in the coldest part of the country...'
Marshall: '...first, I'm an Eriksen. Cold has a plumping effect.'

Marshall: 'It's kind of a big, professional meeting. You might want to trade out that lollipop for a shirt.'
Ted: 'Yeah. I'll just give it to one of these kids.'
Marshall: 'Oh, buddy. You're half naked, you're not a parent to any of these children. Don't offer 'em candy!'

Marshall: 'All pregnant ladies have crazy sex dreams. It's just her hormones going berserk.'
Barney: 'So who's responsible for her rapid thigh movement this time?'
Ted: 'Oh, my favorite was when she banged George Washington.'
Barney: 'I liked the three-way with Bill Cosby and Papa Smurf.'
Ted: 'Oh, he smurfed the smurf out of her.'
Marshall: 'Yes, while The Cos smurfed off in the corner - we all remember.'

Marshall: 'The last time I lived this far from him, was my semester abroad.'
Lily: 'You never did a semester abroad?'
Marshall: 'That's what I called it, when we lived on opposite sides of the campus.'

Ted: 'Robin, this show is so dirty, I don't know whether to hug you, or run a shower for you, so you can sit there alone, crying and clenching your knees.'Robin: 'It's just bad camera work, okay? Wayne, our camera guy - he wasn't that great.'Marshall: 'I don't know. I think he did a pretty good job, considering he was probably only using one hand.'

I'm a good boyfriend in my sleep. I can rock a killer foot rub with one hand and brew a kick-ass pot of chamomile in the other, that would make you weep. Hell, I've forgotten more about microwaving fat-free popcorn and watching Sandra Bullock movies than you'll ever know, but: thanks for your concern, rook!

Marshall: 'The broken windows?'Lily: 'We had to make it look realistic.'Marshall: 'But why did you break two of them?'Robin: 'It looked like fun when she did it, so I wanted to try.'Marshall: 'I can't believe this whole time it was you guys; I've been blaming Really Tan Dancing Leotard guy.'

Lily: 'That's Dirty Dancing!'Ted: 'It was on last night.'Marshall: 'No, it was two nights ago. 'She's Like the Wind' has been stuck in my brain for about 40 hours. I just got it out; now it's back in. Damn you, Swayze!'