In life some things happen to you that you would have never wanted...one of those things has or is in the process of happening to me...I have been going out with my girlfriend for 18months as of last week. This might be true for many other ppl...but me and my girlfriend had the most awsum first part of our relationship...for the first year there was absolutely nothing that I could fault her on...we had a few of what are too small to be called fights in that year...and who doesn't? So I wasn't worried when we had these arguements...to me life couldn't get better...this was the girl I wanted to spend my life with...but like I said...life isn't fair...

From the year point onwards many more serious fights started to make their way into our relationship...she has said her fair amount of things that have had me wondering whether death was really that bad...not that I haven't done it to her too...but it was starting to happen all too much for my liking! We fight almost everytime we talk now...in most cases over the most pointless things...but it starts to take a toll on your feelings, your heart and you as a whole!

I have been contemplating breaking up with her for months now...I can't truely remember the last time that I truely loved her...things have just taken too many turns for the worst! I am not entirely sure what she will say or do when I tell her what I have to say...I just hope she will give me time to explain myself...I really want to do it face to face so as not to seem like a coward...and so it's just now waiting for the courage to take that final step that I am waiting for...

How can love change that quickly? Why does it happen? Answers unfortunately I'll never know till the day I die...although they would be very helpful right now!!