Parents must play key role in dissuading teens from drinking

Some argue stricter laws needed

Nov. 13, 2007

Ocean Township Police Chief Antonio Amodio (above) addresses parents concerned about underage drinking in this 2006 photo. At left: Christopher Cardillo and his father, Bob, were both badly injured when their car was struck by an underage driver who had been drinking. / (PRESS FILE PHOTOS)

Written by

STAFF WRITER

That's the advice Robert Cardillo gives to his son, Christopher, when the 17-year-old goes over to a friend's house or to a party where alcohol might be present.

The Cardillos' opinion on the matter may carry more weight because he and his son were nearly killed by an underage drinker and driver in 2005. Their 2001 Toyota Acura was broadsided by the intoxicated 16-year-old, who was behind the wheel of a stolen plumbing truck.

"It's not the alcohol, it's when you get the keys to the car that's a problem," Cardillo said.

Cardillo, a former restaurateur in Brooklyn, said he used to confiscate keys of patrons who'd had too much to drink because people didn't respect their own limits. Adults are often just as bad as kids in using poor judgment, he said.

"In general, it's prevalent. I can't sit here and say I don't know where people are going to be out partying tonight," Christopher Cardillo said of people he knows.

"I just hope you're not going to let them drive," Robert Cardillo interjected, as he sat next to his son on the couch in the living room of their Old Bridge home.

"No, I take keys," Christopher replied. "I don't think alcohol in general is such a bad thing, I don't think it's such a demon, but I think if people just understood about what it means to be responsible."

While the senior Cardillo does not allow underage drinking parties in his house, he is not naive to the truth that his son has friends whose parents will allow drinking.

The rationale, Christopher Cardillo explained, is that people his age are going to party no matter what, so isn't it better that the partying be done in a controlled environment under the supervision of responsible adults?

Tougher penalties urged

Assemblywoman Amy Handlin, R-Monmouth, said she wants to see stiffer penalties for underage drinking, and plans to introduce legislation in the upcoming lame-duck session.

The proposed legislation would require:

Underage drinkers to spend a minimum of one summer performing community service if convicted.

Revocation of their driver's license, or postponement of the ability to obtain a license, for one full year.

A uniform $200 surcharge, in addition to individual municipal court penalties. The surcharge would go to the Drug Enforcement and Demand Reduction Fund for alcohol education and treatment.

"I recognize we can't arrest our way out of the problems of underage drinking, but there is no question that young people will die without more effective deterrents," Handlin said.

Handlin said she is not sure she had the votes to get the bill passed.

"All I can say is, if it's bottled up in the committee, shame on any legislator who would dismiss the importance of such legislation at such a time," Handlin said.

There is no law in New Jersey prohibiting parents from serving alcohol to their child on private property.

Where parents get in trouble is when they allow someone else's child to drink.

Ocean Township Police Chief Antonio V. Amodio Jr. said the state has always barred underage drinking in public places, but until 2000 in his Monmouth County town, the law didn't apply to parties in people's homes or other locations that are technically on private property.

"Some years ago, underage individuals would rent a motel room, and they would have an underage party there," Amodio explained. Motels being private property, all police could do was make some noise and attempt to contact parents.

Consumption can cost

Since 2000, Ocean Township has had one of the strictest underage drinking laws for towns at the Jersey Shore; it prohibits people under 21 from possessing alcohol on private property without parental permission.

Under the law, the fine on a first offense is $250 and $350 for each subsequent incident, and the Municipal Court judge also is empowered to suspend the defendant's driver's license upon conviction for up to six months.

The ordinance has been praised by many in town who appreciate the town's "pro-active" approach to an ongoing societal problem. But it has been criticized by those who believe the law is either too Big Brotherish or who think the police should be spending their time pursuing more serious crimes.

When Amodio became chief in 2004, he took the township's enforcement tactics against underage drinking a step further by publicly releasing the names of all over the age of 18 who are arrested or issued a summons for violating the law, a crime equivalent to a moving traffic violation.

"We have charged parents," Amodio said.

Amodio said he has seen the negative impact of underage drinking parties on young people.

On his watch, death and alcohol poisoning have come from these events, and he is determined to stop future tragedies in Ocean Township.

"If you have two or three drinks in you, two or three beers, it gets a lot easier to talk to the beautiful girls that I like to see," Christopher Cardillo said. "It takes the edge off . . . that's not such a bad thing. The bad thing is when you're so drunk, and you go up to her and you can't remember her name the next morning, that's the bad thing."

Advice to parents

Experts agree there should be greater parental involvement.

As a parent today, "you need to be nosy about it," when it comes to the health and safety of children, said William Sette, president and chief executive officer of Preferred Behavioral Health of New Jersey. Sette started the mental health provider in Ocean County 27 years ago, under the name Northern Ocean Counseling Service.

As one suggestion, Patricia Healy, a parent, and substance abuse coordinator at Toms River Intermediate East, said "parents need to have dinner with their children."

One of the top reasons that kids don't use alcohol and drugs is consistently, "what my parents are going to think of me," she said.