Bless you, one reasonable and butthurt Colts fan (jersey tucked into jeans, per Lucas Oil Stadium dress code) visibly dismayed that his team would bother to pointlessly win its way out of the Andrew Luck sweepstakes. If this game also results in Jake Delhomme getting to start for the Texans in the postseason, it’ll have been the greatest unwatchable game there ever was.

Of course, the Colts have to apparently also win next week at Jacksonville to squander the top pick. Soooooo, c’mon one more division rival laying down for the Fat Humps.

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As a Texan fan I am now glad that I have family obligations the first weekend of the playoffs instead of being forced to watch a blowout loss. Also this wonderful loss helps set up the Rams for a kings ransom worth of draft picks and keep Luck out of Indy.

ESPN fucked up big time tonight and told all its Twitters and NFL Live viewers that if the Colts beat the Jaguars, they clinch the #1 pick. COMPLETELY untrue. Could not be less true. MAYBE they’d clinch the worst strength of schedule between them, the Rams, and the Vikings for the #1 pick, but come on… they’re all tied in the win column right now. Stupid fact checking by ESPN stats and research, and now it spreads.

Take it easy on these guys; Indianapolis just got past pin-rolling its stone-washed about a week ago. Members Only is in the absent phase between “really sweet jacket” and “ironic.” (Of course, with no irony in the midwest more than 20 miles from Chicago, the comeback will be sincere.)

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Ah fuck that noise. We won the game. Good for our long time guys like Reggie and Mathis. If the Colts don’t get Luck so be it. We’ll still come back and win next year. Tuck in that jersey with pride Fat Humps!

(They still better fire Caldwell though. Seriously, I can’t take any more “chop that wood” speeches.)

It’s all well and good for jubilant bloggers to taunt the fat humps, but it’s amazing how many mainstream television analysts are taking at face value that “the Colts” “want” to lose so “they” can draft Andrew Luck.

What the fuck? This has to be the dumbest proposition in the history of sports. No player or coach except Albert Haynesworth has ever tried to lose on purpose, especially in the contract-free NFL, because at the end of the year everyone is evaluated (i.e. fired) based on their performance.

Moreover, in the players case, these big round heads on my TV box are actually suggesting that “the Colts” are trying to suck in order to help the team draft their replacements who will take their jobs.

That’s not even counting the hilarious absurdity of the fact that we’re presuming Andrew Luck will be at least as good as fucking Fetushead himself, just because he’s vouched for by the same slavering horde of Draft Orcs, led by those coiffed fucks Todd McShea and Mel Kiper, who whip themselves into a frenzy about a “can’t miss” “once-in-a-generation” QB every other year like Matt Leinart (junior year), Alex Smith, Ryan Leaf, Tim Couch, Vince Young, and my personal favorite, JaMarcus Russell, whose entire qualification for being considered the equal of John Elway was that he dragged his hilariously fat body onto the field for a few games at the end of his college career and launched a few 80 yard bombs to open college receivers.