My Grandma died in Texas. Her children are across the us and her grandson (me) is stationed in korea. I cannot go pay my respects. I went to a temple in waegwan. I have gone many times. But never saw a monk there.This time I went still no monk and I want to pay last rites. I do not know the language here. I barely know the philosophy but I try to understand. I want to do it right. please pray for us all

Buddhists have dozens and dozens of branches and sects just like Christianity. So I have no idea what Koreans would do for last rites any more than you do! However, if you really want to do something Buddhist for your grandma, you had a good impulse: find a monk. You don't actually have to find a monk, necessarily, just somebody who knows what to do at the time of death. There are many people on this board who can pray and do puja for your Grandmother, and I will also include her (and you) in my daily practices.

For you--if you want some kind of prayer or something, you should repeat the mantra of the Bodhisattva you feel most connected to, I guess. If you don't know who that is yet, repeat Om Mani Peme Hung. If you have a mala (rosary) you should repeat 108 with a genuine wish that it will bring all beings to enlightenment. If you don't really have any idea what I'm talking about, don't worry about this stuff yet.

"Even if you practice only for an hour a day with faith and inspiration, good qualities will steadily increase. Regular practice makes it easy to transform your mind. From seeing only relative truth, you will eventually reach a profound certainty in the meaning of absolute truth."Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche.

For you--if you want some kind of prayer or something, you should repeat the mantra of the Bodhisattva you feel most connected to, I guess. If you don't know who that is yet, repeat Om Mani Peme Hung. If you have a mala (rosary) you should repeat 108 with a genuine wish that it will bring all beings to enlightenment. If you don't really have any idea what I'm talking about, don't worry about this stuff yet.[/quote]

I dont even know what a bodhisattva is. Yes this is my limited knowledge. I just know that going to the shrine here comforts me. other than that i do not know more

micah wrote:I dont even know what a bodhisattva is. Yes this is my limited knowledge. I just know that going to the shrine here comforts me. other than that i do not know more

The short answer is that a bodhisattva is a being who devotes their entire life to the benefit of others and esp. to the alleviation of the suffering of others and to the enlightenment of other beings. A popular (but inaccurate) definition in the past has been a being who intentionally delays entry into Nirvana in order to help all beings become enlightened. Sometimes this definition can still be read in places. Grandmothers often act as natural bodhisattvas.

I like visiting shrines and temples too. When I was a kid in Hawaii I would visit temples when I could. My Dad took us to a famous temple in Hawaii twice and I sort of regard it as my family's home temple (at least for me it is).

If you have leave available, you could also do a kind of pilgrimage to temples in Korea and dedicate the merit to your Grandmother. So you could visit the temple, light incense or a candle, say a prayer for all beings and your Grandmother and then go to the next one. Just south of you is one of the head Joyge (Korean Zen) order temples, Tongdosa in Yangsan. This is a bit unusual as they have stupas with Buddha relics and not a Buddha statue itself (although I think in neighboring little temples which are part of the complex they do have Buddha statues).

"Even if you practice only for an hour a day with faith and inspiration, good qualities will steadily increase. Regular practice makes it easy to transform your mind. From seeing only relative truth, you will eventually reach a profound certainty in the meaning of absolute truth."Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche.

Micah, Buddhism is a hugely complicated and vast religion...don't get overwhelmed.

That said, Here's a bunch of stuff to get overwhelmed with. You may get an especial feeling toward one or more of them. There are literally infinite Bodhisattvas, and depending on the school of Buddhism, there are 3-4 who are most highly revered. These four are very common in East Asian Buddhism...you might see them around. Being able to recognize them in Temples is always nice. Especially Guan Yin.

Sorry, one more. Maitreya is the Bodhisattva who will become the next Buddha (Buddhas are Bodhisattvas who become completely enlightened). Maitreya is most commonly known as his beloved incarnation Budai--the fat Buddha https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budai