6 Thoughts on Orange is the New Black Season 4 Episode 3: (Don’t) Say Anything

Netflix released the fourth season of Orange is the New Black yesterday. Only a lunatic would attempt to recap the 13 episodes of a series that you probably finished before dinner last night. I am not a lunatic, but I will share some stream-of-consciousness ramblings as I binge. Let’s go!

Ha ha! Lorna Morello is surprised to hear that Litchfield Penitentiary has a warden. Well, Lorna, given the lack of competence at Litchfield, that is understandable. And Joe Caputo’s title is “Director of Human Activities.”

“Director of Human Activities” is an asinine title. Random aside: I still give side-eye to the “Department of Human Services” vs. the “Personnel Department.” Secretaries are “administrative assistants.” It strikes me as vague inflated descriptions thought up by some empty suit in mid-level management who gets paid to rename positions. From now on, I don’t want to be called a blogger; call me “Director of tapping the keys on a laptop while dressed in a robe and sitting on the sofa to entertain human TV enthusiasts. ”

Taystee’s got a sweet office job

I love that Taystee is now Caputo’s assistant and attributes it to winning the job fair in season Season 2. Bravo for the continuity! Taystee + access to official records = brilliance.

Here’s what we’ve been waiting for a Red vs. Judy King showdown. The proud Russian head of the prison kitchen vs. the privileged celebrity chef, who already has her grubby, soft, well-manicured hands all over the vegetable garden. Red better not get cocky, though, for all of Judy’s sophisticated airs, she could fashion a shiv out of a corn cob.

Poussey is well-traveled, multilingual and educated, but her friend Brook assumed that Poussey was born to a crack whore and grew up impoverished and living in squalor. Raise your hand if you’ve ever encountered someone who widened their eyes in patronizing surprise that you’re so “articulate.” Didn’t that scene just trigger you? You know who you are. Brook’s assumption was Soso wrong…

Mimicking the iconic boombox declaration of love in Say Anythingdoes win Soso some points. There was, however, a missed opportunity to play “In Your Eyes” during the closing credits.