We’ve all seen the stereotype before: Elderly man with khaki trousers up to his chest. Who hasn’t, right?

Of course, whenever we see such an old man, we always shake our heads, smirk, and think, “Look at that old man. Look at his horrible fashion sense. Is he just too ignorant to get with the times?”

Well, I had an epiphany recently: Maybe it’s not a lack of fashion sense that dictates what these old men wear. Maybe they’re not too ignorant to get with the times. Maybe they just don’t want to get with the times….

I teach at a continuation high school, which, if you’re not familiar with the concept, is where they send kids who’ve been kicked out of school. As you can probably imagine, our population is… ahem, colorful. Drug addicts, gangstas, we got ‘em all.

Now, in case you aren’t “up” with your gangsta wear, OVERSIZE OVERSIZE OVERSIZE has been the fashion trend for years now…. Huge t-shirts that go down to your knees… saggy jeans that hang halfway down your ass, sometimes to the point where the waist is just above your knees…. (Seriously, how do you even run from the cops when your freaking jeans are down to your knees?)

Anyway, a couple years ago, I decided it would be funny to dress as a student for Halloween. So, I borrowed some clothes from one of my teacher friends, who happens to be about 50 pounds heavier and eight inches taller than me. Not surprisingly, his clothes fit me like a gangsta.

I also spiked back my hair, stuck two large adhesive gold stars to my ears as “bling,” and finished the outfit with high-top sneakers and a shoelace belt. Here I am, in all my ghetto glory:

Ghetto Dennis

And boy, did my kids get a kick out of the outfit.

“Whoa, I thought you were a student for a second!”

“Dude, you look ghetto, man!”

One of my female students even said to me, “Daaaaamn, Dr. Hong. You look dope. How come you don’t dress like that more often?”

Far be it for me to be unappreciative of a compliment from a 15-year-old girl, but my response was simple:

“Because I don’t want to.”

Given my students’ reception of my Halloween outfit, I’d like to believe I have a good grasp of their style. I can dress just like them if I want to.

Yet, I have exactly zero desire to embrace this style. I’d prefer my pants to go up to my waist, like a civilized person, thank you very much.

And that’s when I had my epiphany: Old people are probably the exact same way. They’re probably thinking, “I’d prefer my pants to go up to my nipples, like a civilized person, thank you very much.”

And that’s why I will never again judge an old man for wearing high-waisted pants.

Dennis Hong blogs here and doles out dating advice here. He keeps his pants up in both places.

3 to “Why old men wear high-waisted pants”

I think the thing that will never go out of style is fitted. You don’t need skinny jeans, but something that fits your size. Fitted clothes always look sexy. Just look at the celebrities on the red carpet. Everything is tailored.