DairyFarmersWife's Journal, 03 May 2013

It's day 3 without you. I'm convinced you've become a stalker. I tried to put you out of my sight and next thing I know I turn around and you're there!?! Seriously? I know.. I promised you a fluffy vacation but I'm short and I couldn't put you on the top shelf where I wouldn't see you without getting a ladder. You were taunting me when I was trying to pee and I had to move you asap. I improvised!

I'm sorry you disliked you new spot at the bottom of the dirty clothes basket. I only threw one t-shirt over you and it didn't even smell that much. How was I supposed to know hubby would climb a silo then go sweat in a tractor without a cab and get covered in dust? I didn't know he would be throwing barn clothes on top of you. Usually he throws these straight into the washing machine. You've seen it! The man is trained to throw everything automatically into the washer. Jeans, whites, darks.. yup.. into the washer.

Now I know hubby and the small female human don't know the laundry basket exists nor would they ever be tempted to touch something that might imply doing housework. So obviously when I woke up this morning and found you in your usual freakin spot right in front of the toilet.. you put yourself back! It's a bit stalkerish. Did you think I would see you and immediately rush over in excitement to find my current weight? Nope.. It helps that one of the dogs peed right in front of you. This is what you get for putting yourself back. It would help if you could let me know which dog it is that has suddenly decided everyone else pees there so they should to. The two morons were let out at 10pm. They should be able to hold it.

Tonight.. I'm locking you in a cabinet. Try getting out of that one Houdini!