Cufflinks that brandish all-caps disclaimers and warnings? My interest is piqued. Sparrows, peddler of lock picks and other Houdini-style tomfoolery, introduces Uncuff Links, wrist adornments that inconspicuously incorporate a universal handcuff key into their design. In an elegant display of dual function and synergy, the concealed uncuffers will both open almost all standard handcuff locks, and keep all French shirt cuffs tightly closed. Imagine the Bond-style fun you can have sneaking off with the girl from HR during the office Christmas party this year.

And now the warnings and disclaimers: 1) Under certain circumstances, the use of Uncuff Links' sneaky spy functionality could result in your being shot. 2) This is not Sparrows' problem or responsibility. 3) Don't break the law. 4) If you do break the law, at least try to make sure the press gets a good closeup of the Sparrows name and lock emblem.

At this point you could put a different type of smart ring on every one of your fingers if you wanted. The NFC Ring is a programmable piece of smart jewelry you can wave around powerful wizard- or dismissive CEO-style...

The Killer Key is for law enforcement officials, landlords with squatters or evicted tenants, and pranksters who thrive on taking things one step too far. See, the key blade inserts into any Kwikset or Schlage brand lock...

The Tiny Inconspicuous Handcuff Key is intended for use by trained law enforcement, military, and security professionals only. However, TIHK will sell a pair of them to anyone with a credit card and $13. Because that...

When I run...ha! This entry is already full of lies. The last time I ran I think I was 8 and the ice cream truck was about to get away before I ordered my pink sherbet foot with the gumball toenail! So let me start again....

The Add-A-Lock does one better than the portable intruder alarm: it won't just alert you when your one night stand tries to sneak back into your bedroom to sucker you into a committed, long-term relationship during which...

You can pick your nose, but you can't pick your lock. At least not until you've had proper training from Ehdching's cutaway practice padlock and lock pick set. This complete DIY package includes a transparent cutaway...

Obviously it's necessary to pick a lock only when you are a locksmith or have been kidnapped and held hostage in a locked room. Or, I guess, when you need to break into your ex-girlfriend's (aka Heart of Blackness) apartment...

Why does a monster under the bed have to be scary or out to get you? Why can't it be there to keep you safe. Or, in the case of the Monster Vault, to be a safe? The Monster Vault is a slim under-the-bed safe for storing...

Why a FlexSafe? Because of that one time when I was Floaty Pantsin' around a pool full of women's beach volleyball players and didn't notice some punk kid snatch my bag. My wallet. My phone. My keys. My Ziplocs of granola...

Not that I'm one to break and enter, but...I could be if I had ITS Tactical's Titanium Entry Card. Made of aircraft grade titanium, the 0.032" thick "emergency" lock pick tool set fits just as easily into wallets as it...

Ye of long legs, take note: though the Knee Defender can't increase the amount of space you have within your sphere of airplane seat misery, it can prevent further reduction of the already minimal square footage. Comprised...