Posted on Tuesday, July 18, 2006. It turns out there's an upside to the current conflict between Israel and Hezbollah—if you're waiting for the second coming of Christ. Here's a selection of excited messages spotted over the last few days on the Rapture Ready/End Times Chat online bulletin board. By Ken Silverstein.)

SourcesNote, July 23, 2006, 8:30PM:

Quote:

Most of the quotes in this item were contained in a posting to an email discussion group to which I belong; that posting linked directly to the Rapture Ready bulletin board. It turns out that several other sites had previously posted the quotes. I'm not sure who originally found the Rapture Ready messages, but if you let me know I'd be happy to make note of it here. (Ken Silverstein.

Praise God! We are chosen to be in these times and also watch and spread the word. Something inside me is exploding to get out, and I don't know what it is. Its kind of like I want to do cartwheels around the neighborhood. Catherine's comment: You're probably just constipated.* * *

In another thread, someone brought up the fact that the kidnapping of the first Israeli soldier that started this whole thing was on June 25th and if you count from that day to August 3rd.......it is *EXACTLY 40 days!!!!!*

I find that to be a HUGE coincidence.Catherine's Comment: Doubters are not recognized at Rapture. Only liberals, heathens, and leftist pinko commies are usually doubters. * * *

A question just popped in my head. Do you think children of around say 7 or 8 (but before the age of accountability) that have been indoctrinated up until that time by their parents religious beliefs will be raptured? . . . For example, would a 7 year old muslim be raptured? I know G-d will do right but I was just wondering everyone's thoughts. I hate to think of kids being left here. Catherine's comment: Don't worry...they will be cared for by GOP pedophiles and those Republicans who are adopting the 400,000 frozen embryos Bush is so fond of.* * *

Got that dancing feeling on the inside of me.Catherine's comment: Dancing is frowned upon by real Christians, so be sure you keep such sinful actions on the inside of you. Otherwise, you might be denied Rapture participation.* * *

This is the busiest I've ever seen this website in a few years! I have been having rapture dreams and I can't believe that this is really it! We are on the edge of eternity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Catherine's Comment: The rapture dreams are probably due to your high starch diet, honey. To get over the edge and into the real eternity, be sure you've got at least $1,000 with you. Otherwise you may be turned away and "left" here on Earth with all of those unbelieving, non-Christian liberal heathen. * * *

Whoa! I can sure feel the glory bumps after reading this thread!

Catherine's Comment: Oh, my...this one has been practicing sado-masochism again. THAT will most definitely be a mark against you, especially if your leather, whips, and retraining devices did not come from the very best Republican stores with the fish on the windows and gospel music being piped out into the street. * * *

I too am soooo excited!! I get goose bumps, literally, when I watch what's going on in the M.E.!! And Watcherboy, you were so right when saying it was quite a day yesterday, in the world news, and I add in local news here in the Boston area!! Tunnel ceiling collapsed on a car and killed a woman of faith, and we had the most terrifying storms I have ever seen here!! But, yes, oh happy day, like in your screen name , it is most indeed a time to be happy and excited, right there with ya!!

Catherine's Comment: (yawn) You are definitely ready for Rapture, and you will be beamed up immediately IF you have the required $1,000...and a Republican voters' registration card.* * *

I am excited beyond words that the struggle of this life may be over soon and I can finally be FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! * * *

Catherine's Comments: No, Laura, you have to stay with George. George is your punishment for killing your boyfriend. Sorry...maybe next time.

This is so exciting....I'm having a hard time believing this is 'real'!