‘Tetris: The Movie’ In the Works Because of Course It Is

Further proving that anything that can be made into a movie will be made into a movie if the IP is valuable enough, a Tetris movie is now in the works. We last reported on the film in 2014, but now it looks like they’ve finally pulled funding together for the project. According to Deadline, “The project is eyed as an $80 million China-U.S. co-production under Threshold Global Studios, a new banner formed by Bruno Wu and producer Larry Kasanoff.” Threshold has been working with The Tetris Company for over a year, presumably to flesh out story details and really make sure they were nailing the deep, rich mythology of blocks falling into rows.

In case you thought this couldn’t get any more ridiculous, there’s this: “The plan is to film in China and other locations in 2017 with Chinese cast featured in the ensemble pic that’s billed as a sci-fi thriller.” I assume it would have to be sci-fi, and I assume aliens will be involved because no one learned anything from the failure of Pixels. Kasanoff tells Deadline, the movie is “not at all what you think; it will be a cool surprise,” and that it will be the first part of a trilogy. That’s right: they think they can mine three movies out of a game you play to kill time while waiting for the bus.

And maybe they’re right. Maybe with the right director and/or writer, this will be a creative movie that far exceeds our expectations and is no way a cynical, ill-concieved attempt to cash in on a 32-year old arcade game. Perhaps morbid curiosity will bring people out to the theater just to see how you can make a movie out of a property that doesn’t even have characters (unless you see l-block as the hero, considering you need it to make a Tetris).

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