not exactly a place of royalty, none the less they call it the queen city... beckoned back by true royalty to the city of my "youth" ...here's to the crazy adventure right out my front doorstep...

Friday, December 23, 2011

2011: ouch

my mind is swirling with thoughts, feelings, regrets, fears, contemplations. 2011 is almost over. i'm so thankful, today, that it is. this has been a super difficult year but it's also been very rich with learning, knowing myself more and discovering more of what it means to follow jesus.

last sunday murray preached about the difference between joy and happiness. i always like to say that joy is a choice and happiness is a feeling. sometimes i get too caught up in the feelings of life.

joy is based on god, it's in our hearts, it's from god, it's deeper than emotion and the root of joy is jesus.

happiness is based on circumstances, it's in our minds, it comes from man and it's as shallow as emotion.

james 1 says it's the testing of our faith that produces steadfastness. if you lack wisdom, ask god and he will give generously to you. i've been praying this year that god would grow my faith and specifically that he would produce patience in me.

yesterday oswald chambers wrote that as we pray for patience, god allows suffering in our lives so that we will indeed have that chance to grow. this super difficult year has been a gift from god. a gift.

that changes everything. it's based on god, it's in my heart, it's from god and it's deeper than human emotion. what does that sound like?

JOY

i've become more patient, more trusting in my lord, more steadfast in my faith and i have been blessed this year with trials, suffering and heartbreak.

i choose joy. and thankfulness.

he loved me enough to accept me as i was in december 2010; but he also loved me enough not to leave me there. i'm a different girl in december 2011.

1 comment:

Cool! I was at a worship night event yesterday and they talked about the difference between joy and happiness. It's amazing to think that even though we don't ''feel'' happy, God can give us joy. And even when the world is falling apart, we can rejoice in God and our salvation!

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.~Romans 12:9-11