It is a guarantee that if you do not espouse the views deemed appropriate by society, government, academia, and the media you will be attacked. Unfortunately, their “politically-approved” views they want you to believe are not based in reality, and exist to advance a narrative or agenda that benefits these select groups of people at the expense of all others.

Naturally, being independent-minded, most people here refuse to believe the lies and instead insist on living a life based in reality, giving said thought-lords the proverbial finger. However, just because you decided to take the moral and correct route, it doesn’t change the fact that you will be in for a life-long uphill battle, full of insults, slander, mockery, accusations, and outright lies. For in refusing to conform to what the aforementioned powers-that-be said, you are a threat to them. And so they will do whatever is necessary to silence you.

While their assault will be a wide one, assailing everything from your political beliefs, your religion, your beliefs on family and culture, the most ferocious and focused attacks will be on your beliefs and relations with women. This is only to be expected because no matter how much we may not like it, both men’s and women’s primary focus in life is the opposite sex. That’s the way we’ve been programmed.

The point is that the majority of flak you’re going to catch for daring to adhere to reality, traditionalism, and truth is going to come from your beliefs, thoughts and principles on women. And not only is it going to be the majority of flak, it’s going to be the most visceral and ferocious, as you are speaking directly to what has been the primary motivator in all of humankind’s existence. You are addressing women at their psychological core.

Sadly, despite the supreme importance of this topic, the attacks you are going to receive are not going to be cogent, logical, reasoned, or empirical. They’re going to be quite irrational, unreasonable, and simplistic as they are coming from emotion and a fear one’s precious ego might get shattered. And these attacks, pathetically, can be summarized in six simple groups or categories:

The problem with these attacks is that they disproportionately affect and are pertinent to younger men. When you are just starting out in life you aren’t rich, you haven’t fully developed your personality or mental facilities, you are saddled with college and the debt that comes with it, which is all further burdened with the worst economy for young people since the Great Depression.

Cary Grant was the George Clooney of the 1930’s-1960’s. Starting as a pretty boy when film was in its infancy days, he aged like the finest of scotches, easily being the most handsome and charming man in Hollywood well into his 60’s.

He was so incredibly debonair and polished that when paired with the latest 20-something starlet as his love interest in a film, it wasn’t unrealistic to imagine the 62 year old Grant couldn’t hit that (and probably was). You, me, and nearly every other reader in the primest of our primes couldn’t hold a candle to an aging, gray haired Cary Grant.

And even Cary Grant admitted saying, “Everybody wants to be Cary Grant. Even I want to be Cary Grant” as the actor himself knew he could never live up to his Hollywood persona. In short, it was impossible for anybody to be Cary Grant….and that’s precisely what every man has to do – the impossible. We all need to become the Hollywood incarnation of Cary Grant.

“Achieving Grant”

Now, many people will complain that this task is impossible. And certainly the VirginTOW’s will claim we’re all “pussy-pedestalers” for daring to “waste our lives” improving ourselves for women. However, in becoming the Hollywood version of Cary Grant a great and many benefits come with it, making this arduous task worth it in the end.

The first benefit of “Achieving Grant” is that it immediately repudiates the six standard accusations made against men who insist on traditional values and being men.

You Live With Your Mother – No you don’t. You have your own job, spend within your means, and are a truly independent man.

You’re A Loser – No you’re not, you have a career and purpose in life. You work hard, and you may not be your own boss yet, but you are actively working to achieve that goal. You may not be there at 28, but you will be at 38.

You’re Ignorant Or Uneducated – No you’re not. = You’re actually quite well-read, with a much-better-than-average understanding of economics, politics, history, philosophy and morality. You also actively work to remain so, and never stop your education in these fields.

You’re Lonely Or Have No Friends – Again, no you’re not. You’re not only well-read, but actively pursue interesting hobbies and interests making you a genuinely interesting person. You also hone your skills at being charming, charismatic, and entertaining. People like you, perhaps even gravitate around you—not because you’re the “life of the party,” but because you have put the effort into being a more interesting person and living a more interesting life than those around you.

You Can’t Get Laid Or Have A Small Penis – Well, your penis size is outside of your control. But barring that anomaly that affects less than 1% of men, you hit the gym regularly. You run, you eat right, you diet. You commit to that mandatory life-long part time job of staying in physical shape. You then combine that physique with the courage to approach women and get your ass shot down to the point you nail at least nine women. Why nine? Because that is the average number of sexual partners a man has. You hit 9+ you are in the top 50% of men and therefore can “indeed get laid.”

Name Calling – If you commit the effort to live a life that refutes the above five accusations, then being called a “misogynist” or a “loser” or “jerk” or what have you doesn’t matter. You won the debate and now your assailant has to resort to name calling because they’re 100% wrong about you. You are empirical proof, standing right in front of them that they, their ideology, and their belief system is wrong.

Naturally, turning yourself into the man where the above accusations are just not true takes time. You’re not going to be running a business the day after you graduate from college with $50,000 in student loans and a shitty job offer on the table while bench pressing 150% your weight, while also having a detailed knowledge of Austrian economics, while actively pursuing your new-found passion of sky diving.

But if you put your mind to it and eschew day time TV, getting hammered at the bar, and can avoid knocking up a girl, this is all attainable by your mid thirties. And then you can refute these guaranteed, standard accusations with the simplest and most effective argument,

“It’s not true.”

Finding the confidence

The second advantage that comes with “Achieving Grant” is sanity and confidence.

When I was a bit younger I walked into what was then “The Times Cafe” in Minneapolis. This was my favorite haunt to hang out at because they served good martinis, had a nice dance floor, and 6 out of 7 nights had jazz or salsa.

After a long day at work I went to The Times to get myself a martini and read The Economist. Thankfully, Vic Volare and His Volare Lounge Orchestra was playing which was one of the more danceable and fun bands in the Twin Cities. Coming straight from the office, I was in one of my “power-banker suits” and thought I’d get a little dancing in to supplement my booze and economics.

The first girl said no.

The second said she was “tired.”

The third girl participated in a dancing phenomenon where she giggled and pointed to her friend across the table and said, “no you dance with him.” Which then resulted in an insulting ping-pong version where the other girls said, “no you” “no you” “tee hee” “no you!” I walked away and I don’t think they realized I removed the offer from the table.

The fourth said no, as well as the fifth, to the point that I then decided I would ask every obviously un-spoken-for female at The Times to dance.

After 31 rejections, not one said yes.

To most normal men, they would have taken this personally. Did they stink? Were they ugly? Were their flies open? And they would likely never approach women again (certainly abandon ballroom dancing altogether).

Not me. And I didn’t take it personally because I knew better. I “Achieved Grant.” I was successfully employed. I made more money than any girl I asked to dance did. I was dressed in a sharp looking suit. I was in shape. Oh, and there was that whole minor thing about being an accomplished ballroom dancer.

But the irony is, despite all the rejection, those 31 girls all turned down what was likely the best offer in terms of a man that they had received all year. And I say that not out of arrogance, but supreme and total confidence. I left not one stone unturned in terms of my own self-improvement and I was hand’s down an outstanding catch.

In other words, if you “Achieve Grant” you know for a fact you’re the prize to be won. And if you’re shot down you have the sanity and knowledge knowing there was nothing wrong with you, but something wrong with them.

The third and final benefit of becoming Cary Grant is you’re just going to be a better man. I can certainly appreciate staying in doors, vegging on Grand Theft Auto V, getting hammered, and maybe gaining seven pounds over a gluttonous weekend. And I can certainly understand ignoring women and doing your own thing.

But you become Cary Grant not just because of the sanity and confidence that comes with it, nor the ability to conveniently dismiss criticism from your haters as simply “false.” You do it because being an interesting man, pursuing intellectual and interesting things, disciplining yourself through diet and working out, and increasing your wisdom through study and thought makes for a better life, a better mind, and a better man.

You enjoy your life more, you enjoy more important things, and you have life-experiences that the average (and genuine) basement VirginTOW dweller will never have. So while the path to “Cary Grant” is a difficult one, realize you are going to die. You can live a life aiming to be Cary Grant, or one that will be wasted like nearly 98% of most people’s lives.

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The image is perfect. Machine gun fire from an airplane is o excuse for your hair to be out of place, your shirt to be wrinkled or your tie to be loosened. Also, running for your life is never an excuse for sweat.

Then why did McQueen have to settle for Ali McGraw, who had just had Robert Evans’ kid? Never understood that. He was one of the biggest stars on the planet, and he basically had to settle for a divorced mom.

Bogart was the only one who came from a more upper class background. The other actors like Grant had to learn everything from observation but hey that’s what actors do. You don’t think Paccino or DeNiro are real gangsters.

How true. I remember Cary Grant mentioning once that he didn’t mind taking comedy bites, (which might lower his dramatic image), because had always approached acting as a regular job, and he was just a regular guy. He didn’t approach his film career as a self-absorbed, pretentious thespian, as too many actors today do.

Connery had polish, but McQueen always struck me as lacking depth. Too much along the lines of the shallow, self-involved brooding type begun with James Dean, and embodied in the present set of actors.

Cary Grant, the man, was a trainwreck. Cary Grant, the actor, was magnificent. Of course, you must understand that it was an act. A show. Don’t base your life off a show. Yes, you can have the manners, the style, the witty one-liners, but that doesn’t automatically mean you’ll be beating away Audrey Hepburn with a stick. Emulate, yes, but don’t copy.

Given someone mentioned Steve McQueen, I wonder if Robert Evans might be the real life version of Cary Grant. Yeah, he got divorced a ton but he banged a ton of hot ass while producing some of the greatest movies ever made.

True he did bang a ton of hot ass, including that of Randolph Scott during the 11 years they lived together as a couple. This article is pretty funny considering ROK’s policy that ‘… homosexuals are strongly discouraged from commenting here.’

Sure, because no two guys would ever live in the same house to save money. Well Jake, hate to break it to you, cheap skates will live in some pretty different situations to save a buck. Malibu ain’t cheap, never has been. Like Hedda Hopper used to say, “Don’t let a little thing like truth get in your way.”

I’m no adherent of the MGTOW movement, but I do understand where they come from. Many of them seem to have been screwed over by women one too many times (i.e. divorce). Calling them “virginTOWs” is a little presumptive; as I understand it, they aren’t necessarily eschewing sex.

You guys need to go overseas. Go for a walk in Bangkok and you will be hounded by tailors offering suits for well under $100, obviously not the best but will still fit better than an off the rack. I had a couple suits made that were in the $300 range, they fit amazingly well and the fabrics and workmanship were really good quality.

Now I feel terrible! As the breadwinner of my family, these are the accommodations I have to make. Anytime America wants to give my husband a job, I’ll return to doing my part to stimulate the economy.

Yeah. Take a trip to Asia for some tailoring. Hong Kong, Thailand, Korea. All good. I get tailored cotton shirts for 35$. Starting on the suits soon. I love it. It’s a life changing thing; to start building up a bespoke wardrobe. It sets the frame and when you find that simply putting on some bespoke threads makes your day, it just changes you. I could sit around in tailored suit, reading classics, having a bit of single malt and really wouldn’t ask for anything else from the world.

That’s an average Brooks Brothers suit.Custom or bespoke are probably a few thousand. If you wear suits all of the time you already have them but if you never wear a suit there’s no point in going out and buying a cheap one because it won’t make you look any better, probably worse.Buy what you ordinarily wear but just get a better quality and fit.Or you can get a sportscoat that can be worn in a number of ways.Pay attention to your shoes even if all you ever wear are sports shoes and of course, socks. And underwear in the rare event any of you boys ever get laid :o)

Form a relationship with the guy (find a sales guy not a chick) at your local men’s tailor/designer store. They usually have end of season and private sales for their clientele. Only deal with that guy and he’ll look out for you on price, quality, etc. If their is no local tailor/designer shop find the store with the best men’s department at the mall and do the same. Most of the decent Asian tailors have seasonal trunk shows in major US cities where you can get bespoke goods at better than average prices. Same also applies to your barber, shoe guy, smoke shop guy, liquor/wine guy, and anyone else you do business with….take care of them and they will take care of you.

I looked into her soft eyes and I knew she wanted me. While stroking her golden fur I moved her into position. Slowly, slowly I reassured her and she gave no resistance. Entering her pure moist, soft region I experienced something that I only ever dreamed of – no drinks or dinner to buy, very little game required. I just wish the chickens and horses would stop staring at me.

Cary Grant was no great alpha, masculine icon. He was a dapper, stylish dandy-fop. And yes a gentleman.. at least on screen.

In today’s world, he wouldn’t last on the screen for too long. And the women today wouldn’t swoon for him the way the women of that time did. He’s not thuggish and ripped and doesn’t have that “hawt” bad-boy alpha look and attitude that women want today. They would LOL at him, think he’s “gay” or something and find some thuggish alpha jerk and bad-boy who makes them cream their panties.

Exactly on point. It’s worth considering how our icons have become “anti-heroic,” to coin a term. Who has worked to undermine our once vibrant culture, and why? (Hint: who controls Hollywood and most of the media?)

Oddly whenever I think of an ideal man I tend to picture a bachelor rather than someone who is married. I don’t think of a traditionalist, I think of someone who plays more outside the rules. Bill the Butcher from Gangs of New York is what I consider a bad ass alpha male. I’m not sure if the real Bill the Butcher was a lifelong Bachelor but in the movie he was. But I guess you could say he was a traditionalists for his time. Not what would be considered a traditionalists today however.

Great article. You guys who don’t agree because Grant had personal and psychological problems are missing a crucial point. Grant was a type. When Archie Leach he realized that he wasn’t getting anywhere he “invented” Gary Crant. His genious was that he could define what a man’s man was. And then he pretended to be one, and he was a pretty good actor so he could pull it off. The personal/mental problems (As my psych professor put it) were because he was putting on an act and . He KNEW he was faking it, but it got him what he wanted. Archie Leach couldn’t live up to the character he created in his real life.
The point of the article is that anyone can become the “Cary Grant Type” if they want to. And you don’t have to be false to the real you. When you take care of your financial affairs, work on your intellect and build hobbies, have a genuine, rich, social life with like-minded people, then you’re on your way to becoming the “Cary Grant Type,” but for real.
I believe the Men’s Movement should force this down people’s throats. Be a real person, not a puppet to fake social norms being forced on us. There’s been some talk about Stoicism on this site. This is one of the basic ideas of Stoicism.

Good to remind myself that after a substantial dry spell, not only have I had a great sex/love life with several women in the past, I can look at several of the women I knew during this period wanted to have sex with me (and probably some who wouldn’t) as “dodged bullets”. The fact that my test results are clean is probably invaluable in the game dept.

I strongly oppose suicide, but in Hemingway’s case there were mitigating factors.
1) At the age of 61 in an era when the average life span for males was 65, and a lifelong heavy drinker and smoker, he was nearing the end of his innings anyway probably
2) Hemingway’s father, and his brother, and two of his nephews all suicided as well. This may be evidence for some sort of genetic defect in the Hemingway Y chromosome which left them susceptible to depression/suicide.

He was terminal and didn’t want to go out in a state of torture. His father had the same form of cancer, I believe and did himself in rather than suffer. It’s not like just couldn’t handle life anymore. He was sick and chose to die before the hell began.

Ehh, not sure I’m on board with this. I’m old by manosphere standards, and have become CG at times. The problem is the value proposition is lacking. It takes effort, time and money to become CG’ish, and frankly the women that will be even mildly interested in that kind of suave confident character will be few and far between.

Women want the clown with the big red nose. I mean they literally want it, as evidence by the silly Red Nose Day gag back in March to raise money — for what? — I still can’t say for sure by looking at their landing page. At least the ineffectual Ice Bucket Challenge had a clear cause associated with it (but I’m at a loss as to what it was now).

So, rather than put on the tux, you put on the clown suit replete with big red nose and floppy shoes. You spit stupid-game and get girls to giggle until their boobies jiggle. If you can spark some tinglies down south, you’re gonna get more snatch than a CG catch.

I wish I could wear my tux (yeah I own one) one or twice a month and enjoy a classy night with a sophisticated lady doing things that inspire and stimulate an educated and enlightened man like myself. hell, I can even get a PItbull catcall every once in a while when I suit up. But alas, that tux sits in the closet. I can’t even find a worthy event at New Year to drag it out anymore, because they’re all filled with vapid party girls, even events for middle-aged audiences.

So like my tux, my CG persona stays in the closet. It’s trumped by my Bozo suit and Sinefeld’esk stand up routines.

If I use terms like dinner jacket, black tie and white tie here, I’m probably going to get a bunch of ,”huh?”‘s I feel this way about the proper way of things in this this anything-goes society.

But to be understood I use terms such as tux for those not educated and trained in the art of dressing. For me, it’s important be understood first, and be correct second. And, only the jacket is a dinner jacket. So the whole ensemble is properly referred to as black tie, or if a true formal event, white tie.

I don’t wear a dinner jacket because very few people even know it’s called a dinner jacket. Of course, if I were to wear an ivory dinner jacket now that it’s summer season, I”m sure many would still call that combination a tux as well. And, they would suggest I pair it with some gaudy colored bowtie/cumberbund combo that smacks of a 1980’s prom.

Forget the dumb clowning and if you see a grown man behaving this way tell him to stop acting like a clown.
The Romans had the word gravitas which was a virtue and is how men behave. If you wanted to lighten up a bit it was levitas.
But frivolus was for kids and idiots. Clown men are like kids.

If I have to pick it would be Rhett Butler. True, he waited too long for Scarlet to discover that he was her man but other than that flaw, he was a man’s man. In the novel, he refused to marry a girl after being out too long ( referred to by that loser Charles at the engagement party) because she was “a fool.”

If you haven’t watched Father Goose, with Cary Grant playing against type as a ragged, alcoholic MGHOW, you have an assignment.

Not only is it, in my estimation, the best Rom-Com of all time, but perhaps as close as anyone has ever come to making a man’s Rom-Com. Perhaps those two things are related. Men are the true romantics.

Even though your comment is a dig I still say thank you, I do prefer to analyze but not pass judgement. It was not my intention to offend you as I agree with most of the article, but the 31 did seem high to me though and I’d be curious as to what you did after those rejections (while still in the bar).

For reference, I’ve made 21 approaches this year that have resulted in 13 bangs, 3 in the pipeline, 3 rejected me when I told them my intention was ONS only, 1 I overplayed my hand and lost it, 1 rejected my advance altogether.

While pleased with my results, I run through the one I overplayed and the one that rejected my approach to see what I could have done differently, if anything. Neither affected my frame but they provided me with valuable feedback nonetheless.

I read the comments below but I think Clooney is a good guy thats current and has it together. Sure he married a lawyer but I bet she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch and look classy doing it. She’s gotta be doing something right after all the other women he’s been with. Clooney’s cool, calm, in control, fit, and a pussy slaying cocksman.

Ever see street photos of urban areas in the US from the 1930s & 40s and notice most men in suits?
Slimness may be attributed too lack of refrigeration, processed foods and easy means of transportation.

Not to mention seasonal eating and the fact that most just couldn’t afford to eat like hogs. We could both make a list miles long. Mother made five sandwiches from one can of tuna.
Take a look at the old travelling circus freak shows. Type in the “fat lady” and take note that these circus freaks of old are the norm today.

Cary Grant was a fine actor, and a hell of a good looking guy. But in today’s world, I suspect he is too polite. Modern women would walk all over him.

Although I do like the way he dished out that slap to that mouthy little french chick in ‘to Catch a Thief”.

I would argue there are some better men in film to emulate.
One that comes to mind is Han Solo, and especially the way he deals with Princess Leah.
She is no walkover, and would probably be considered a bit of a feminist icon…. but Han doesn’t cut her any slack. If anything, he dials up the attitude, and openly mocks her title. Beating up stormtroopers looks good with the babes as well.

Others worthy of emulation.

Pitt in Fight Club
Bogart in Casablanca (before Bergman appears, and he becomes a beta)
Any James Bond before Brosnan took over.
Charlie Sheen in Ferris Bueller.

One of the reasons I advocate the “remake,” To Have and Have Not. Bogey keeps his frame throughout and Bacall doesn’t play a weepy little thing to manipulate men into taking care of her. She manipulates them with vamp appeal to rob them fair and square.

You gotta be kidding? Archibald Leach was a well known poof. He was an infamous pickle smoocher. And this is supposed to be a site advocating masculine men. Shit, do I have to school you young guys? Better picked someone like Ernest Hemingway as an example of that era, or perhaps John Huston, or from more recent examples George C Scott or Charles Bronson, Robert Mitchum Lee Marvin.

same thing happens to me when I hit the Latin clubs. No biggy though, because once the females who rejected me take a glimpse of me on the dance floor, I can see their regret coming from their face! I just look over and give them a wink, as to say “you had your chance.”

“You can live a life aiming to be Cary Grant, or one that will be wasted like nearly 98% of most people’s lives.”

No thanks, I won’t live my life chasing a false image of a guy who lived in the 80’s.
Doing all this so you can dismiss peoples perception of you is what I would call a life wasted. This isn’t to say you can’t have goals and dreams, can’t be inspired by someone who is already there and strive for their level of success.

Cary Grant was certainly a fantastic actor and I love his films, but I suspect you may have fallen a bit short on your research for this article. You do realize that Cary Grant was gay don’t you? I suggest that you look into into Humphrey Bogart or Jimmy Stewart instead.

Cary Grant: gay. George Clooney: also gay. Starting to see a pattern here. You don’t admire these folks for their masculinity (lol), you’re just attracted to them. Which is understandable, they’re both handsome. Only something tells me you’re not ready to admit that to yourself just yet.

Great article: I’ve been looking for a similiar falling in the same topic, of being more eloquent, but I forgot to bookmark it, now I’ve been fruitlessly searching for it, but can’t seem to find it, it’s main focus was teaching how to change your phrasings to appear more dominant and assertive. Anyone remembers it?

Do you know Cary Grant was bisexual? He had a relationship with costume designer Orry Kelly. Maybe this information will break your strange ideas about masculinity.

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