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What Etiquette Is – The Social Graces

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Did you know I was a school teacher at one time? Yes, I was that educator, the one children either admired or feared. I taught those hated subjects —> Mathematics and Science — to the sponge like minds of 6th, 7th and Eighth graders. Of the 435 students I had the pleasure to invade the brains of, only 3 really wanted to learn. Sad yes? Each school year my admin would send to my classroom about 435 souls. I took cell phones, knives and even one gun, from the hands of the unsuspecting. Yes we had a “Resource Officer” – a deputy sheriff who was more of a presence then a enforcer. Yes, I did enlist his help, after getting the gun in my hand. The parent of said student said I had no right to take the weapon, she gave the “boy” it for his protection. Hmmm, lets teach something here…

People are not disturbed by things, but by the view they take of them. — Epictetus

Do any of you know what Etiquette is? Some say it is the Social Graces. I guess you must have to be really, really old to know what this is. Seems the younger generation just was not either taught it, or they decided that ME! ME! ME! is more important than having a gracious lifestyle. You know, I am not surprised. I wrote about Social Graces last century, In the 1990’s. I am still surprised of the number of websites that plagiarized my work, calling it their own. I have made This work licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License

To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization, and at present very few people have reached this level. ~ Bertrand Russell

People like to get along with other people. All your life you will be influenced by others, and in turn you will influence them. In order to set some standard for behavior, society has created what we call “etiquette”.Webster’s New World Dictionary defines etiquette as “the forms, manners, and ceremonies established by convention as acceptable or required by society, in a profession or in official life.” This section is to help you to learn how to follow the rules of etiquette. Also it should help you to learn to reason and become adaptable enough to make a few of your own rules for those inevitable social occasions that have no definite plan. Thus we might also consider etiquette as the ability to reason and do the right thing at the right time. If you can do this, you will have social grace.

There are three main steps toward becoming a socially gracious person. The first one comes at home, mostly during your early years, when family influences and relationships will probably carry on for the rest of your life. The second occurs at school, when you begin making friends and learn to get along with many other people. The third comes when you move from school out into the whole world of friends and strangers, which we call society. The main point for you, as an individual, is to be prepared to use good manners at all times in any one of the three settings– home, school, society.

Social grace comes with having poise. Poise comes with experience in meeting all kinds of people and knowing what to do or say. If you study this section, which gives you many of the acceptable rules of etiquette as well as some suggestions for meeting new problems, you will learn to feel more secure in all kinds of social situations.