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I'm 29 and just recently realized that I am meant to be polyamorous. It was a strange revelation, especially at an age when you think you couldn't possibly learn anything new about yourself.

Now, at the time this struck me, I had been dating the same girl for about five years. As my understanding of myself unfolded, I tried to share these feelings with her, but she could not wrap her head around it. Needless to say, this extreme difference in the ways we choose to conduct our life and relationships lead to a break-up.

Part of me is glad that I can now persue the type of relationship that would make me happy. However, ever since the break-up, I have been a mess. I feel very alone, and most of my friends do not understand when I explain to them the type of relationship I'm looking for. They assume it's simply a sexual or selfish thing, and cannot see how a polyamorous relationship has the ability to empower those involved, and how this type of relationship has benefits well beyond the bedroom.

I haven't anyone to talk to about this, and my friends (and ex's) judgments about me are beginning to make me feel like a terrible person. I came here in the hopes that I can find someone(s) that understand what I'm feeling and will support me, not just emotionally, but logically and reasonably.

Finding out new things about yourself is exciting, but when it's something like this, it's difficult to be understood, and I suppose, at this point, that's all I'm shooting for. Sorry to be so long-winded...

I haven't anyone to talk to about this, and my friends (and ex's) judgments about me are beginning to make me feel like a terrible person. I came here in the hopes that I can find someone(s) that understand what I'm feeling and will support me, not just emotionally, but logically and reasonably.

Welcome! Having community around you is often really important. You should also check out poly- groups in your area for support.

__________________
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.

Welcome! Having community around you is often really important. You should also check out poly- groups in your area for support.

Hi. Thanks. I took a look around and didn't come up with much of anything in the lines of a poly-group around here. Though, I will be in a position where I could start one. Any suggestions on a good way to go about it?

Meetup.com is a good place to find people interested. I looked last night for a meetup here, and although there isn't one organized through meetup, there is a list of about 60 people interested in one.

__________________
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.