I’m a scratch golfer. I play the game the way I live: straight-up, contact complete. When I’m not on my blog, golfing or coaching golf, I’m usually bass fishing, chicken-frying steak on my George Foreman or having hot no-strings sex with your mom or at church. On here I’m going to be teeing up the day's hot topics, including: golf, women, whiskey and wings. What I'm not going to be blogging about is stuck-up women who don't know how to have a good time and let a man be free. Fore!

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….. Ball Memorial Hospital?!?!?!

APRIL 5–An Indiana man had his scrotum severely torn when his “on-again, off-again” girlfriend entered his home and pummeled him in an attack that resulted in the woman’s arrest on several criminal charges, including two felonies.

Christina Reber, 43, was freed from jail yesterday after posting $10,000 bond in connection with her bust for the alleged attack last Friday at the Muncie house of her ex-beau (who told cops he had ended the couple’s eight-month relationship days before the assault).

The victim, 57, told police that he was working at his computer when Reber, pictured in the adjacent mug shot, “walked into his house uninvited,” according to a Muncie Police Department report that will make every guy wince. The man said Reber screamed at him to “call the fucking police” before launching her assault.

Reber, the victim told cops, first struck him repeatedly in the head before latching onto his scrotum and “squeezing as hard as she could.” The man, interviewed by police at a hospital emergency room, said that he “was in incredible pain when Reber grabbed his scrotum and began digging in her fingers.”

The victim recalled that Reber “refused to let go of his scrotum,” but that he was “finally able to pry his scrotum from Reber’s hand” after they fell to the ground during the scuffle. The man then called an ambulance, which transported him to Ball Memorial Hospital.

A cop reported that the man had blood on his shirt and “a long wide tear on his scrotum,” which had been “completely torn loose from his body.”

In a follow-up interview two days after the incident, the victim told police that his scrotum was “so swollen he is unable to walk and is missing work.” The man added that his scrotum “is still bleeding and doctors are not sure if there is permanent damage to his groin or not.”