Your personal power begins with the dawn
of your realization of your personal worth.

Think of yourself as a baby, as you were when you were
nine months old. When you were small, your views of self
were not tainted by the false words and perceptions of others.
You were pure, whole, complete.

Then, you looked at everything, saw everything, and believed
in everything other than yourself.

You can’t believe in yourself when you don’t believe you
are worth spending your days passionately absorbed in joyful
work.

Survival, yes. We must all survive, but we are also entitled
to survive with personal dignity and with joy.

We can work and love our job. We can eat and love the
food. We can sleep and adore the person beside us. We can
dream and see ourselves where we will one day be, if only wedecide it is to be so.

It is the love of the work
that brings you pleasure,
not the moment the workday is over.

How, I ask you, do you suppose you can be an effective,
thriving individual if your esteem bank is empty? You can’t.
Your value feeds on itself, derives its pleasures and inspiration
From within, from your purpose, and from the joy you receive
by living that purpose.

A vast majority of the masses inhabiting Earth at this time
live like robots. They are on automatic pilot, numb to their
true joy.

Yet there are souls who thrive, who shine, who glow – rich
in self-esteem, wealthy in self-belief, prosperous in love, and
compassionately giving.

These are the people who inspire you.
Why aren’t you one of them? You will become one of them
the moment you decide to be the best you can be – because
you will have taken the step to honor your worth.

To sacrifice your core self for someone else’s benefit, to
throw away your life to satisfy another is the biggest crime.
When you do that, you steal from your very self.

And your age is not an excuse. If you believe the lie that it is
too late to start over, you will regret it later. No matter how old
you are, even if you are in your seventies or eighties, you are
not too old to begin taking personal responsibility and creating
positive change in your life.

Today is the day to begin, or tomorrow, to rise with the sun
and decide exactly who you are, who you wish to become, and
declare to yourself that you no longer choose to sacrifice your
being, and value for the benefit of another at the expense of
your very life.

When you do not take the initiative to be who you came
into this life to be, then each day you face misery. And, ultimately,
you will face illness because your system will be
toxic from self-hate and lack of joy. It will begin to shut
down because it will have nothing left to fight for.

Give yourself everything, every joy to fight for, and you
will find vitality and health, and you will glow once again
when you look in the mirror.

By choosing to pursue joy, you will accomplish far more
than you ever could by toiling away for endless hours in a
dead-end job, with personal decay as your weekly payment.

No other person is responsible for your life. When you
blame another, you do not validate your true self.

If you truly want a better life,
take your life into your own hands
and create it for your very own self.

What others have does not matter. What matters is who
you are. Once you decide who you are, you will become that
person eventually. One moment at a time, your life will be
renewed.

Take the initiative to dismantle every part of your life
that causes you misery. Leave behind each task, obligation,
job, person, or pattern you no longer want. Replace them
with the qualities and purpose you have always dreamed of.
Replace them, perhaps, with enjoying peaceful, quiet time
alone or spending more time with people you care about or
engaging in activities that bring you pleasure. Clean out the
clutter, doubt, and negativity in your mind, and eliminate
the false views so you can truly live again. You can do this
easily by seeking to find the gift in any seemingly negative
circumstance. Replace every complaint with a new creation.
Replace every quality you feel unhappy about with the
belief that you have within you the ability to be all you were
born to be.

Live. See. Do. Discover. Be you! Get to know who you really
are. This is your responsibility to yourself. All else follows.

For how can you be there for others when you disregard your
self? You can’t. You need yourself.

Without your self, how could you ever know the joy you
will experience as soon as you decide exactly where you are
going?

Begin now. You have a clean slate. The future is what you
cause it to be.

Create a brand-new you, and one day you will look back
and thank yourself for giving you the gift of you! You need
permission from only one person: yourself. It’s your time to
thrive. The next chapter will tell you exactly how to do it.

We have all undergone tragedy. Perhaps there is a reason why you chose a particular life lesson – a particular tragedy – to help yourself grow and become who you were meant to be. Perhaps you can look at the seeds of disaster from a new perspective and view them as the seeds for life renewal.

It is most often in our darkest moments that we meet our fate. If you seek within, you can find the reason for those dark moments.

What can you become as a result of your darkest hour?

Who can you help as a result of your personal tragedy? When will you begin to realize that you matter, you have value, and you are needed on this Earth. You would not be reading this book if this message was not meant to awaken your heart, to cause you to realize that you matter. Individual growth is a conscious choice. You must take what you have, and

Begin exactly where you are at this very moment to move solely in the direction of the life you want to have and the you you want to become.

The reason you desire this life and yearn to become all you dream you can be is that it is the real you, the you beneath the facade of the robotic life you have been living until now, beneath your false perceptions and your limited views of self.

Begin to see any shred of goodness in yourself and validate it. Begin to acknowledge any good you can possibly find in yourself that aligns with the ideal person you envision yourself to be. Consider this: Even a thief has a shred of goodness – he is quick. I do not condone stealing. I merely use this as an example to show you that every human being has traits that can be turned toward a positive purpose.

Here are the three steps you must follow to begin to take personal responsibility:

First, believe that when you picture something in your mind, you can achieve it. Believe that when you follow that “still small voice within” – your gut instinct, intuition, or sudden idea that feels exciting, despite society’s logical judgment – you will get exactly what you picture. The key element here is to feel thrilled about what you picture, as if there is a guarantee it is on its way to you.

Second, picture your life, your ideal life, the work that will fill your days with passion, and you will discover exactly what it is you love to do. Is there a person with whom you strongly identify? Someone who inspires a feeling inside you that speaks to your soul? If that feeling says, “This is what I wish I could do!” then you have an important clue to your life purpose.

Third, leave that horrible job, that degrading spouse, that miserable situation, and just start over again, for you! Move precisely in the direction of the ideal life you picture in your mind. The excitement of beginning the life journey you were born to travel will keep your courage strong whenever fear starts to set in. Each day, you will feel excited as you begin to create the changes needed to match the real you, from the inside out.

You will find that as you take personal responsibility for your life, everything you need is suddenly there for you. That phenomenon is behind the saying, “When something is right, everything just falls into place.” I assure you that fulfilling your highest vision and becoming the best you can be is right, no matter who tells you otherwise.

You are not here on this earth to be oppressed, nor are you here to oppress others.

You choose the debilitating patterns in your life. Instead, you can actively choose patterns that will elevate you above the negative spiral of personal decay.

If you are in a difficult situation you can rise above it, overcome it, and even transform it for others.

Too many in our world are searching for validation – for love, self acceptance, confidence, and how to feel good enough. I used to be one of those people. Here are some questions with the answers to help bring you more awareness and simplicity in creating pure, unshakable self love.

How do I love myself?

Love of Self is simply a view of Self. If you view yourself with a great deal of compassion, and suspend all judgment, then replace that judgment with understanding, and compassion, you will come closer and closer to love your authentic self.

So many people have taken on the views of others during their earlier years, and have not learned how to replace those views with the pure truth.

The way to do this is to immediately stop insulting yourself, cutting yourself down, and degrading yourself.
This is paramount! Instead of saying: “I stink at this” say: “I am doing my best, and that is all that is needed.”
You have to bring all of the small insulting lies that you tell yourself up to your conscious awareness.
Once you NOTICE what you are actually telling yourself, and if it is degrading, simply notice it without any judgment whatsoever, and then replace it with something more compassionate and understanding.
Speak to yourself the way you would to someone that you have great respect for.

Love for Self, and love for any other person comes from our views and perceptions. It is all within the mind. Our mind is governed by our thoughts. Our thoughts create our feelings. Our feelings urge us into action, and the cycle continues.

So in order to truly love yourself, you must change how you view yourself, and that can only be with complete compassion, care, respect, and honestly taking a conscious effort to change the verbal abuse you dish out to yourself when you are not even aware of it most of the time.

People that love themselves do NOT degrade themselves. I wouldn’t dare degrade YOU, so please immediately stop degrading yourself, and come to embrace your unique qualities. You chose those qualities and attributes for your unique contribution in this world. Honor what makes you “different” because that is your unique Light that you are on this Earth to shine!

Treat yourself the way you wish someone else would treat you, and always give yourself a heartfelt hug for the sacred person that you are.

How can I feel like I don’t need approval and validation from anyone else anymore?

If you are going to base your sense of self worth on the changing views and perceptions of others, then it is like building a house on shifting sand.

Every person has the right to their own views and perceptions, and no one has the right to judge you.

It is solely your view of self that matters, because only you can live your truth!
You know what feels true for you inside and what does not. Another person cannot ever live your truth, or tell you what is true for you.

Once you start to honor what feels true for you in your heart, and simply go for it without even speaking about it to anyone else, you will come to feel a great measure of inner confidence that grows each time you honor what feels right to you in your heart – not your head, or your fears, but in your heart.

It takes practice, like anything else, and once you get used to honoring and following your own inner truth, you will no longer feel the need to receive validation and approval from anyone, ever.

Why is it so hard for me to love myself?

It is hard because no one ever taught you how to honor yourself, your preferences, your talents, abilities, strengths, inner gifts, and areas of self expression that are uniquely yours.
So if you were never taught how to do something, why are you being so hard on yourself?
Now, all you really need to do – which is actually quite simple, is to tell yourself every good quality you have on the inside in front of the mirror, each day, based on your observable actions.

Begin a dialogue to become friends with the person you see every day.

So if you fed your pet, that is being caring. If you called a friend that is going through a hard time – that is being compassionate. If you went to work so you can pay your bills – that is being responsible. So you are to walk up to that face in the mirror, and as hard as it will be for your ego to do this dialogue, what will happen is that you are slowly, day by day, going to become your own best friend. You are going to feel more self-appreciation. You are going to feel more care for yourself.

This mirror process truly works! I have taught it to countless people over the last decade, and I also had to go through it myself for over two years, every day, to chip away at the lies I was told growing up, and replace it with authentic truth, based on my observable actions, so my big ego would actually believe me.

Trust that there will be fierce resistance to this from your ego in the beginning. I actually cursed at myself my first time in front of the mirror over a decade ago. I wouldn’t dare curse at myself now! I can attest that every single person I teach this to, and share this with, now loves themselves genuinely. The ego is melting away, along with the self-degrading lies.

If you really want to love yourself, the old beliefs must be transformed. It is like cleaning out an inner closet with an old belief system, and replacing it with authentic truth. No one can give this to you but you. No one can love you and make you feel lovable. You have to know and believe you are lovable. This is just one technique that cost nothing, and brings about astounding change every single time.

You have to also realize that it is your responsibility to learn how to appreciate yourself, no matter what circumstances are facing you, and never seek to validate yourself from the outside in, because you can only be validated from the inside out. This will get you there a LOT faster than anything I have ever come across.

What can I do to really feel happy inside?

First, do the mirror technique that I outlined above twice a day, for two years. Then, imagine that you have a clean slate before you – called your life – and that there was a guarantee that if you followed your truth, you could NOT FAIL.

What do you really want to do with your days and nights? If you had twelve million dollars in the bank, and you already owned every THING that you have ever wanted to own, what would you love to do so much that you would do it for free?

What are the natural talents and abilities that you have? What are you naturally good at? What makes you feel so alive?

These are the questions that you have to ask yourself, so that you can get to the core of who you are on the inside, and then you will be able to live it, and love every minute of it on the outside.

The only things that make me feel happy are when I am with my children, when I am giving my private consultations and intensives, writing (this for you : )) working (in absolute JOY) on inspire! magazine, going out in nature, doing my hobbies, really enjoying the night sky, or a sunset – they are simple pleasures. Being with friends and laughing – that’s something we could all use more of! Bringing through information from Divine Source in my writings – I love every minute of it! I love to travel (sometimes) and there is so much in life that I love. So I create time to do it all during my days and nights. I had to CREATE my life, no one gave it to me.
You have to create the life of your dreams, based solely on what you love, and on how you can serve from your heart so that you are really making a difference.

For me, personally, there is no greater joy than when I am making a difference – that’s why I love the work (joy) that I do so much!

Many times I am volunteering and do NOT get paid for my work – like right now. And I still love it just as much as if I was paid ten thousand dollars for the few hours it takes to put this together.

You came into this life for a purpose. The key is to find out what that purpose is, so you CAN move in that direction, and live your life in-joy! It is then that you will be doing everything that will make you happy, because you will be living from the inside out, rather than looking for an answer from the outside in.

Why is it so hard for me to take a compliment?

Probably because you are so used to taking insults. I was there too! If someone complimented me I would say: “Oh, that’s not true.” Because what I really wanted was more validation. I then learned a simple technique that actually changed that. I learned to simply say Thank You.
For the first dozen or so compliments, it was really hard for me to do that. Then, I began to feel more comfortable accepting a compliment. NOW, I learned NOT to take a compliment seriously at ALL – because it is based solely and completely on the views of another person, and what is in their mind – which has nothing to do with me!

Additionally, I don’t take an insult personally either – how freeing! I can be completely open to constructive critique, such as when I’m working on a project, however, I no longer take it into the core of my being like I used to.

Just say “Thank You” when someone compliments you, and should anyone ever insult you, just know that it is coming from their own perceptions, and never take it seriously.

Moreover, people do like to express their views. So if someone does share their views with you, just know that they are entitled to them, and maintain your own view of self with a lot of loving compassion, and zero self-judgment – that is the key!

By your keen instincts, the subtle things you pick up on, and really being honest with yourself. Perhaps someone adores you and you may not feel worthy of that. So you may doubt that anyone can really love you for you.

When you really love and value yourself, in a genuine way – without all of the ego, you will come to trust your feelings and perceptions. You will instinctually “know” if someone is for real or not. The trick here is are you being real with yourself, or are you playing games with yourself, and not following your own truth?

How can I know if someone loves me for who I am?

We tend to doubt others when we doubt ourselves. We also pick up on the authentic feelings other people have for us when we are being authentic with ourselves.

Trust your feelings, and get your head out of the way. Move more into your heart center and dare to expose how you really feel – even if it just to yourself. You will find that when you are completely honest with yourself, and the feelings in your heart, you can then learn to trust what you are picking up from other people. You will trust yourself, and you will be able to follow what feels true for you. You will also know if someone really does or does not love you – you will know – once you come to know and honor what you feel inside fully.

Did anyone ever tell you..
That everything you believe is wrong with you,
Is actually what other people told you –
And you still believe it?
Did Anyone Ever Tell You..
That the fastest way to transform
How you feel about yourself,
Is by ceasing all negative self talk,
Catching it when it happens, and
Replacing that with factual truths
Based on your observable actions?
I used to despise myself.
I know what it feels like to believe
The lies I was told growing up.
And I was able to transform it all
By doing WHAT I PREFER, WHEN I Prefer,
And HOW I Prefer (as long as it’s honest),
Combined with giving myself real, positive
Self talk in place of the negative lies.
There is NOTHING WRONG with you!
The only thing that’s “wrong” is
Negative thoughts that you still believe about you.
Did Anyone Ever Tell You..
When you turn your thoughts around,
You simultaneously transform how you view yourself?
It’s true! And guess what happens next..
You actually start to LOVE yourself
Just for being who you are inside.
It’s time you really value yourself
By finding everything that’s RIGHT with you!

It’s okay to NOT “have it all together”
ALL of the time?
Did anyone ever tell you..
When you feel like you’re taking
Ten steps back,
You’re about to take 100 steps forward?
Did anyone ever tell you..
Chaos precedes growth, realizations,
And positive transformation?
I’ve been through the ringer in life,
Have gone through as much pain as you have,
And it all served for tremendous growth
And transformation.
Nothing can be transformed
By keeping the status quo
Alternatively, when you allow yourself
To feel ALL of your truth,
ALL of your feelings, and
Allow it all to surface,
Something great happens:
You can see the light on your path
That you couldn’t see before.
It all comes full circle, and you realize,
The rough times were worth it after all.

It is crucial for you to know that every tactic you
may try to kill the genuine love you feel—avoidance,
logic, pushing loving feelings down whenever they pop
up, sarcasm, —all of those tactics do not work.

Let’s go through this process while you’re feeling
the sadness and emotional pain, and learn how to
quickly transform it, because once you go through this
process, you will experience inner peace.

Perception, Misery, Drama and Pain

The cause of our emotional pain comes directly
from our perception and our attachment on the ego
level that erroneously causes us to believe that
the person we deeply love is the source of our inner joy and
happiness. As a result, when that person is no longer in
our lives, we feel and believe that our joy has been taken
away and will never come back.

Then our minds swiftly zoom back to the past. We
go into longing mode. We long for the past. We get
deeply into listening to old love songs, and feel really
comfortable with our misery. Heaven forbid anyone
dares to change the music to happy songs. We visit
old places we used to go to together. This is especially
helpful to sink us further into the Valley of Misery. We
commiserate with whichever friend will listen to our
saga, otherwise known as heartbreak and drama. Oh
how the ego just loves this place! Then we continue to
wish it could be the way it was in the beginning, when
it felt like heaven on earth.

We reminiscence about the past and either block
it out or cry it out. And we wonder why we’re feeling pain!
We have become so deeply invested in the past that we
forgot about the whole reason we are in this life! You
are here to bloom and experience your greatest self.

In order for that to happen, we will have to force ourselves
to change the music.

The Misery Alert

Do you remember being in school when an
announcement alerted all teachers and students that
there was a test for a fire drill? Yeah! We got to get out
of our classroom (read most boring place at age ten)
and go outside to feel the spring breeze and sunshine.
We were taught how to prepare for a fire. We learned
the most important thing in the world. We learned to
get out calmly and quickly.

When we are feeling complete and utter misery,
we must get out of the past and focus on right now,
this moment, while we simultaneously look ahead.

Top Ten Misery Checklist

I’m going to share a brief misery ending checklist
that you can refer back to whenever you need it.
You may want to bookmark this page.

When you start thinking about him and the past:

Every single time you think about the past and
your relationship, force yourself to focus on right now.

As soon as you realize you are heavily invested in
the past, take a few deep breaths and force yourself to
smile.

When you start to hear old love songs, change the station.

When you drive by any of the places you used to
go to together, drive in the opposite direction.

If you’re wearing his shirt to sleep, donate it to a
needy cause or throw the shirt in the trash.

If he left things in your home, unclaimed, put
them in a box and leave it on his front lawn. If the
things are not important, such as his tooth brush, toss
it into the trash.

If he really put you through the ringer, write a book
about it! Just imagine for every tear you shed, you will
receive royalties instead!

You could write a really deep, misery laden love
song like Alanis Morissette’s classic hit “You Oughta
Know” or an empowering song like the classic from
Gloria Gaynor, “I Will Survive.”

Remind yourself that there can be massive gifts in
disguise just waiting for you if you tap into your creativity!

Start to read stories about other women who were
once dumped and how they turned their lives around.