Gender was something I took for granted because I was comfortable expressing my gender and fulfilling my gender roles (as expected by society and those around me). All that has changed now that I’ve seen how my son, and others like him, must think about gender all the time.

Let me explain. I’m the proud mom of two young men, but I didn’t always know I had two sons. For 15 years, my husband and I believed we were raising a daughter. Our younger child, who we now know is our son, is transgender.

Over the years I’ve been criticized and asked countless questions about my teenager, such as, “How could a child possibly know who they are or what they want at that age?” and “What kind of parent would allow their child to make irreversible changes to their body with hormones and surgery?”