I have decided to close The Relationship Forums.

It will be closing on April 1 2019, Australian Eastern Standard Time. This decision is based on a few factors... cost, member levels and activity, lack of ability to get advertisng on the site to help fund, sites like Reddit... There's not just no room for a forum any more.

As such, new registrations already closed a few weeks ago.

The site will be backed up and archived, and a single copy will be kept with me, in a password protected zip file to prevent data leak. I will not be selling the site, the site name, or the forums to anyone. ever. I respect your privacy.

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1) click on your profile name in the top right hand corner of the home page
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5) Click Save.

This will then log you out. Don't log back in otherwise you will be re-granting consent. This will delete your user profile, posts, and all associated data (I'm told...)

I will NOT be responding to email requests after this date.

I'd like to offer a massive, heartfelt thank you, to everyone who has graced the site over the years, members gone and members present. You guys made this site a home for me for nearly 15 years, as well as the others from its inception, approximately 20 years ago.

The only place I will be looking for questions will be in the Site Feedback forum.

What to do... 😔

November 4th, 2018, 08:31 PM

So I was with my ex for nearly two years and I broke it off with her, it was a bad mistake from my end and I want her back.
​​​​​​I've been recently hanging out with my ex after two months of being apart and we are very close when we hang out and when we hang out we are close and we'll get back into holding and touching each other as we walk down the street. Then randomly she we'll say 'no touching, we are just friends' or I'll go back to hers and we'll talk for a couple of hours. It's very confusing, she does all this but doesn't want to be in relationship... Plus I need to prove to her I won't be that immature boyfriend and show her the love she deserves

Casej Since she's not ready for a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, slow down and follow her cue. She'll let you know when she's ready to move from friendship to boyfriend-girlfriend material. She needs for you to prove yourself to with your maturity, loyalty, devotion, seriousness, trust and respecting her. This could take a long time so you need to be patient. She wants to re-establish friendship all over again with you before she's ready to take it to the next level. Therefore, in the meantime, behave like an utmost gentleman and do that.

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Do YOU believe you were an immature boyfriend and are her terms reasonable? You realize you're hanging out with her on her terms, right?
How did you get into this situation in the first place?

Generally, this type of dynamic doesn't strike me as healthy. You might want to check whether you want to live this way with her dictating and evaluating your choices constantly or in constant prove-mode.

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Look, if she's not hanging off of you like you're a clothes hanger then you should dump her ass and go zero contact before you end up on the friends ladder.

Google "Ladder Theory" and read about The Friendship Ladder and the Prospect Ladder. Right now you're on a slippery slope to being placed on the friends ladder for good never to transition onto the prospect ladder.

She's playing you like you were a video game.

Don't chase any chick who isn't showing you that you're the prize. She holds all the power in this little game she plays with you. Quit it and move on. I bet the minute you stop giving her the attention she will start to wonder why you're not playing anymore and she will start chasing you.

"First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!