Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Intro for the Newbies

[In order to fill new readers in on who I am and the characters in my life, I’ve created this mini Q&A between me and myself. I’ll keep it on the sidebar to your left so you can refer to it when need be.]

Ok, so let’s get started. Who are you?I’m a 26-year-old writer in NYC. I work at a national women’s magazine and freelance for a couple other publications.

Sounds cool. Is NYC as marvelous as everyone says it is?Living here is fun and having so many things available to you at any given time is definitely a perk. But sometimes it’s overwhelming and exhausting. I’m the type that needs to get away from the city every once in a while in order to appreciate how beautiful it really is (NYC during the holidays is no less than amazing)!

Tell me about your parents.They divorced when I was 18. I see or talk to both practically every day though. I’ve always been closer to my dad than my mom, so when he moved out it was a huge blow for me. My mom has always been a tough person to deal with, but I have hope she’ll change someday.

Do you still live with her?No actually, I moved out on my own this summer and that’s brought its own set of craziness as I do my best to semi-decorate when I have time, keep those creepy-crawlies out and complain about the lack of heat. Oh, and I don't know how to cook. Can I add that I still don’t know my neighbors’ names, but I know the smelly dog next door is named Rocky? Fun times.

I’ll bet. So tell me, who’s T?T is my therapist – as in psychologist.

Oh, so you’re crazy.No! Sometimes the habits you form as a child just to get you through hard situations do you more harm than good. Plus, it helps to just talk things out with someone who’s unbiased. At first I was apprehensive about sharing all this, but if it helps someone else open up then so be it.

Anything else?Yeah, I recently found out I’m severely allergic to some grasses and trees, that my blood pressure tends to drop and that I’m anorexic due to my underweight status. I’m not trying to be thin, but when I get the blues I lose my appetite.

Geez, is there anything that isn’t wrong with you?Well I am kind of awesome.

Sure you are. And who’s Mr. First?He was my first and only boyfriend. We were friends in grad school, secretly liked each other for months, didn’t tell each other until we moved back home, got together soon after, did the long distance thing for a year and a half, almost moved in together in January and then broke up on Valentine’s Day.

Yipers! What happened?A lot I guess. It was amicable and for our own good, but it’s been hard nonetheless. I’m still not completely over it. We still keep in touch, but it’s becoming more and more sporadic. Time does that I guess.

So have you dated other guys since?No, no. I’m not ready and I think it wouldn’t be fair to the next guy. I’d just compare the two and the bar’s been set pretty high. Sometimes I think it’s best to be alone for a while and figure out who you are first and right now that’s what I’m trying to do.

Don’t you miss the affection though?Yeah, I do. Especially when I come home late at night and realize that I can’t call up the person who used to wait up to make sure I got in safely. Well that along with 5000 other moments.

Ok, I’ll stop with the mushiness before you start tearing up here.[smirks] It’s ok. I’ll be fine.

Btw, what’s up with cheering for the Phillies? Aren’t you from NEW YORK?!That would be Mr. First’s doing. I cheer for them and hope they win because it would make him unbelievably happy. Plus, it’s been fun butting heads with my dad (a big Mets fan) this whole season.

Would you like to add anything else?Not really. I’m still young and still have a lot of questions myself so I’m learning to be patient and wait until I’m ready for the answers. No easy feat if you know me!

42 comments
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lol i find it weird/hilarious that your literally having a conversation with yourself and yet by the questions and side comments (ie. "smirks") i wouldn't be able to tell, if it wasn't for that intro that is

Wow, you're great at asking yourself questions- and at answering them! I felt like I was sitting in on a conversation between you and yourself! ;)

I can totally relate to both the strained relationship with your mother and the agony of losing your first love. I went through that just about three years ago, and it took a solid two years to really heal. I'm four months into a new relationship that I finally feel excited and serious about. Just give yourself time, and I think you have the right idea about letting yourself heal and learn as you go. Just live, don't pressure yourself to feel anything or not feel anything!

Congrats on being saucy, and I can see why! I love your honesty and your humor. I'm envious of your life in some ways and feel like I've lived it in other ways. Good luck with everything. My heart seriously hurts for you because of Mr First. My Mr First took years to get over. Ugh a broken heart is a beautifully tragic thing. Beautiful because you allowed your heart to open up and love. Tragic because it ended. Beautiful because it will make you grow into a refined woman. Tragic because it ended. Beautiful because you will have it again - and it really will be better - no comparison!

So, here's a question: do you crave a lot of salt? I have very low blood pressure, and I eat salt like crazy and my doctor says people with low bps tend to crave salt. I wondered after reading this if you did, lol.

blythe, being a journalist helps I guess- can't be afraid to go for the jugular! And thanks so much for sharing your experiences about your mom and first love here and on the other post. It always takes quite a bit of time to heal after a strained/lost relationship regardless of who that other person is, huh?

kelley, is it bad that I sooo wish I started dating when I was a teen so I wouldn't have to go through this whole experience for the first time at 26? Maybe if I had been here/done this five times before I could have breezed through these months and moved on quicker. It's something along the lines of "I don't have time to spend years getting over this. I'll be an old fogie by then!"

But on the flip side, if the relationship is as meaningful as mine was, then it's going to be a long while before you fully heal no matter how many times you've been through it before.

Sorry, senseless rambling just occurred. Anyway...

TMI, thanks for the visit, the congrats and the compliment! I like you already. And yeah, I feel really lucky, but it's easy to forget when you dwell on the negative parts of your life. I'm sure we've all shared some parts of what I write about, which is why I love hearing what other people think or how they made it through the situation. I can obviously still learn a thing or two. And yeah, it was beautiful because he taught me a lot about myself and how not scary love can be and of course tragic because it didn't last as long as we'd hoped.

colby, Hmmm well when I feel like I need to eat something quick or else I'll pass out, I reach for crackers because they're quick and easy. That might explain why they don't make the headaches go away and I feel even more parched. The thing is I really don't know what's a quick thing to do when my pressure drops other than lying down until it picks back up. Drinking Gatorade has helped though, have you tried that?

I just need to eat and drink more and be more in tune with what my body's telling me. And stop getting stressed and anxious (not always easy when you have deadlines left and right)!

Oh TL, I WISH!! It'll be last time I see Cole in action this season. Unfortunately I was treated to free tickets to Amateur Night at the Apollo tonight. The series should've been over by now, but nooooo, it had to rain.

So a part of me wants the Rays to win and the Phillies to get their title tomorrow (if they play in Tampa) just so I can watch. But at the same time it might cut it too close and would be best if the Phillies won in their hometown.

As a blogger/freelancer/ and soon-to-be psychologist, I think it is SO cool that you take your thoughts from therapy and process them here. That's how you make the most of it! Great blog-so glad I found it.

Dropping by from SITS and love your style :-) In fact, so much that I am now a follower. What a cool job you have out there in NYC! I'll be back often...thanks for stopping by my spot as well. Great to connect with fabulous women via SITS.

I love this Q&A for the newcomers, because that's what I am, and it's giving me a great feel for your blog. You're adorable, and I'm loving your writing style! I've subscribed to your blog and I will definitely be back to read more. :-)

HELLO

Hi, I'm Dorkys, a NYC-based writer/illustrator who's currently loving art journaling, decorating my new apartment, and relearning how to play the guitar. Here, I cover life, my art and writing career, travels, and the ins and outs of surviving in this hectic city.