hello, so I'm pretty new here! I only started reading about lucid dreaming some weeks ago thanks to a friend, and now I want to lucid dream. I've started a dream journal (though I've only used it a couple of times due to laziness). I have no problem remembering my dreams, I always remember them.Anyway, I have a problem and I seek advice or if possible, an answer.

My older brother has always been best friends with our neighbor ever since they were little, (my brother is 20, and our neighbor is 19) I've known them since I was little, they've always been there. But recently, my brother moved away to another city to study and only months later we moved. This whole thing combined with me starting a new life at high school has caused turbulence in my emotional state of mind. And I'm a teenager... so yeah you can probably figure out how bad this combination is. anyway, I realized that not only do I miss my brother, but my second "brother" too. a.k.a my neighbor. I've always thought that it was because he was like my brother... but I'm not sure anymore... I've had feelings like these before, like unsure whether I like him or not but I've always discarded them as nonsense. "why would I bear feelings for my "brother"?". Plus he has a girlfriend whom he has been with for the past 3 years... he and I have had some kind of "sexual" interactions before, but very discreet, and he was the one initiating them which made me very confused (it was about 2 years ago, when he had a girlfriend!!). I've made him help me with math homework, since I needed the help but also a bit because he had been missing for far too long. Then I was entirely sure that he was only my brother. But last night I had a kind of a lucid dream. I've never had one of these lucid dreams yet, until last night that is. I was entirely sure in my dream that I was lucid dreaming, and I knew that I probably shouldn't try to fly the first time and I had all these facts in my head. So the only thing I did was controlling people in my surrounding. Only that was hard to do... but I did it. And my neighbor appeared in it... And I made him have sexual interactions with me, bringing me pleasure. He like... stimulated me, if so to say And after that I kissed a girl (can't remember who though). I must be honest that I wanted more pleasure and tried to make other guys please me, but he was the only one I managed to control to do that to me.Now that I think back on it, I'm not sure anymore that I was lucid dreaming... What does things like this mean? me having a "Lucid" sexual dream with him, wanting him to touch me. Can you explain what sexual dreams like mine mean? I'm so confused... I kind of "want" something to happen, but at the same time not. Can things like this impact my way of lucid dreaming? I'm ashamed of myself, to be honest. Can you at least explain the lucid dream and what it means? Is this just a result of me missing them both?I'm not sure of my feelings either, why did I do this to him?

louiselulu wrote: I must be honest that I wanted more pleasure and tried to make other guys please me, but he was the only one I managed to control to do that to me.Now that I think back on it, I'm not sure anymore that I was lucid dreaming... What does things like this mean? me having a "Lucid" sexual dream with him, wanting him to touch me. Can you explain what sexual dreams like mine mean? I'm so confused... I kind of "want" something to happen, but at the same time not. Can things like this impact my way of lucid dreaming? I'm ashamed of myself, to be honest. Can you at least explain the lucid dream and what it means? Is this just a result of me missing them both?I'm not sure of my feelings either, why did I do this to him?

If you knew you were dreaming at any time during the dream it was at least a semi lucid one.

Him appearing in the dream if you were lucid may not have even been symbolic but just due to your conscious waking thoughts coming in. Obviously part of you has some sexual desire there for him and it sounds like you were wanting some kind of sexual stimulation anyway (so it could of been with anyone). I personally dont think this dream meant much other that you may have some sexual desires there.

I agree with the earlier statement, that it mostly a manifestation of your sexual desires, possibly even repressed ones at that, to help you come to terms with them. I'm 19 and I lucid dream about every night, and although I don't really want it in the long run, in the dream moment I often find myself seducing girls I know personally as well as random attractive girls I find that I've never even met in waking life. I wake up after these lucid dreams and regret it slightly, only because I wish I had better used the lucid dream. But in dream moment even when lucid it's easy to get swept up in waking emotions, especially a powerful one like lust! But it's nothing to be ashamed of. It's natural, and if you really don't want it happen, self controll is all it really takes.

in response to LucidLink,I myself in lucid dreams have found myself trying to seduce random people. If often seems that lust is very intensified in lucid dreams for me and I don't know why. I do regret it after I wake up though. I mean, I've never had lucid dream sex or even kissed anyone in a lucid dream, but I have hit on people and I do regret even having this sense of lust after I wake up.

also, I agree with taniaaust1. It would not have mattered, and it is not an insult to ask someone if theyre gay as long as you have the right intentions. Being gay or thought gay is nothing to be embarrassed about.

"All men whilst they are awake are in one common world: but each of them, when he is asleep, is in a world of his own." ~Plutarch

Don't be embarassed! These feelings can be hard to control even in waking life. Sometimes we can't help but masturbate. I've had lucid dreams where I manifest floating female torsos with huge buttocks just so I can satiate my sexual hunger.

It is indeed natural. We can't help who we feel attracted to either. Our organisms make us feel this way. The chemicals in our bodies cause our instinctual behaviour. It's an evolutionary trait naturally selected for the survival of our species - even if we don't do it for this reason, but rather, simply to feel good.

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"Empty cognizance of one taste, suffused with knowing, is your unmistaken nature, the uncontrived original state. when not altering what is, allow it to be as it is, and the awakened state is right now spontaneously present."