FYI.. this IS a joke. Several sites have picked it up and posted it in all seriousness but it's actually from Singapore's "premier satirical humour website" www.talkingcock.com

I spent the last four years of my life living in Singapore, and this story looked really fishy to me. It's not such a bad place. Never picked up on the 'horribly repressed and reserved' vibes, except for the local education system. They overwork their students like crazy. Thankfully, I was at an international school.

btw, I'm pretty sure that's not how you extract sperm. I remember seeing Chinese scientists trying to get some from a panda, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't pleasant. He had to be sedated everytime and woke up in a foul mood.

Owned Well, next time you're in Sing, try going to a mall or something and screaming. People seem to be very afraid of calling attention to themselves in that way, and everyone will wig out and be very afraid of you. Now try that in NYC. People will just ignore you. just cultural, I guess.

But it's for sure one of the coolest places I've ever been, and that includes 30+ different countries...

Well, as far as countries go, I'd rank Singapore pretty much up there. I've lived in a lot of places - my dad's a diplomat so we travel a whole bunch.. hectic, but fun. I lived right on Orchard Road (pretty much Singapore's downtown), and I NEVER got bored. And I'm not really all that wild anyway, so it doesn't get to me... Many Americans have such stereotypical views of Singapore (you know, Michael Fay, the Thought Police, ruthless suppression of free speech by the govt. etc.). It wouldn't hurt for some of you to culturally educate yourselves.

the only cons I can think of are the high standard of living and the accent.. you can barely understand the locals till you start slipping into it yourself... lah (oops). Singaporeans, by nature, are reserved... but you could say that about pretty much all of Asia. I'm Pakistani (yes, from right next to India) and acting that way is pretty much ingrained if you grow up with conservative parents.

I just decided to start posting.. I've been lurking on Fark for about a year.. got sick of not taking part in some interesting discussions. :D

Owned good to have ya. I think it's charitable to say that many Americans have views of Singapore. In reality, I think very few Americans have any views of Singapore at all. It's like my Romanian friend that asked me what Americans thought of Romanians. Answer: they don't. You're right- very few people in the USA know shiat about the rest of the world.

Octer, I think you're right to a certain extent. But I don't think it's done anything bad for the country. It's certainly not hard to have a good time. Many kids in my school regularly went to bars but, then again, most of them were expatriates. Nobody breaks the law.. and that's a bad thing? Well, it happens once in a while. The police force is great - hi-tech and efficent, and neighbourhood communities do their part. The public transit system is among the best in the world. But you're probably right about the structure and orderliness of things - its hard not to get the feeling that Singapore is sterile and overly-planned.

I recommend reading Senior Minister Lee Kuan Yew's book "From Third World to First: The Singapore Story 1965-2000", if you're interested in why Singapore is the way it is. It's quite fascinating how he defends the decisions he made bringing Singapore to where it is today. Take it with a pinch of salt, you might like it.

I don't think it's sterile- just orderly. The wet markets? Far from orderly. I have said repeatedly, I love the place. It's amazing. I wasn't trying to say there's anything wrong with zero (practically) unemployment, crime, etc. But a few things would bother me- the ERP and vehicle laws suck (yes, I know Sing is too small, and they have to atch the number of vehicles), and you give up certain freedoms when you allow yourself to be mailed speeding tickets, etc.

MBK Slow, slow. MacFrugal offered up the word for word quote almost six hours before your post.

How about,"You know, I miss the old days. When a man could just go to work and put in a good eight hours clubbing baby seals, then go home and have a beer with a clean conscience."Now if I could only remember where that was from...I'm thinking Jack Handey, but I'm not sure.What I'm really surprised at is that nobody has brought up this image yet:[image from timwit.com too old to be available]

Octer: yeah.. its a complicated process of bidding and quotas and stuff.. i'm still in the dark about some of it.. the important thing is - it's farking expensive! as if cars weren't expensive enough. Here are some figures I just pulled off a Singapore site about average car prices:

Your average Toyota Corolla LX (automatic) is approx US$36,000.. now add your COE and it's almost US$49k. Keep in mind that this is just the list price. Add insurance, road tax and more options and it'll be quite a bit more. Not fun.

Thank God for the MRT, or personally, a government-owned chauffeured Mercedes (ahh.. the spoilt-brat life of the ambassador's kid for me). Actually, I'm pretty new to the States.. arrived in March via Japan (brr... cold - Singapore makes the rest of the world seem terribly cold). The Bay Area is awesome and still (relatively, slightly) cheaper.

Skwidd, 0wned, Singapore is pretty repressed - try going to the movies there, they cut out everything sexual, including kissing. Indeed, kissing in public is illegal and sex before marriage is baaaad news.

kissing in public is illegal? sex before marriage is "baaad news" how? Both of them happen all the time.. get your facts straight. have you ever been there? you're right about the censorship in movies, but they do not cut out kissing.. steamy sexual scenes get through just fine. Have YOU ever seen a movie in Singapore? They're strict about movie ratings (they are different in Singapore than in the US) and enforcing age-restrictions. To watch an R rated movie, you have to be 21 at least. The next level down is NC-16, which is what Hannibal was. Please. Movies are just as violent, profane and dirty in cinemas there.

But its not hard to get pirated uncensored copies if you really want to.. made in Malaysia, sold at local stores (well, it wasn't until the beginning of this year.. police are really starting to crack down on piracy). Porn is also available and probably whatever else you want, like software.

Thankfully, they're not pretty farked up. They don't seem to be as quick to jump to conclusions about other countries as others do.