Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Glad as Hell; Let's Rock Barrie!

In all the excitement over the Village People incident in Calgary ("it's fun to stay at S-T-O-R-N-A-W-A-Y!"), I missed Harper's stop last week in Barrie, Ontario. Luckily for Canadians everywhere, the Conservative Party website is keeping people up to date on Harper's summer adventures at their far less cleverly named "Summer Tour '05" page. The front page on this site has, I kid you not, Stephen Harper holding a baby. Unfortunately, they seem to have missed Harper's Calgary stop.

Regardless, thanks to the Tory website, I am pleased to present the third installment of the Glad as Hell Tour:

Stop 3: Barrie, Ontario

Location: Barrie, Ontario. A town so dull, Stephen Harper can only seem thrilling by comparison.

Positives: No assless chaps! No backwards cowboy hat! No tight, tight, tight leather vest! No necktie! See what happens when you dress yourself Steve.

Negatives: Still has the world's most awkward smile. And...uhh...he's 11 points behind a government screaming to be defeated.

Human Index: Harper jumps to level 3 - Data. He's dressed like a human but based on the goofy grin, is still having problems using his emotions chip properly.

10 Comments:

What's with the smile? It looks like his advisors stretched his lipps with meathooks. He kind of looks like your typical out of work actress smiling widely in a naive and frightened way while thinking "Oh God, please love me! I'm so alone..."

Unfortunately, the guy beside him seems to be contemplating the possible suppository in case he catches the flu.

Actually, he looks like my kid does whenever we've taken too long taking too many family photos and have said cheese too many times. It screams "Get me out of here!"

CG, I like your montage better than theirs. Anyone know how to hack onto the CPC site and post it? Just asking. Just curious. Wouldn't want anyone to actually do that now would we? Wouldn't want to fuel any conspiracy theories, now would we.

I, personally, like the kid next to Harper. He's standing next to a Canadian celebrity (loosely speaking) and potential PM and the plastic thing in front of him is more interesting. If that doesn't sum up the Glad As Hell Tour, I don't know what does.

Maybe they should get Harper to hold the plastic thing instead of a spatula.

Jason: Did you see the documentary on CBC a little while ago about the spin during the last election. Very open discussions with Scott Reid and the CPC communications person. I don't care what you think about Reid, or policies, but that showed it all right there, showed you how incompetent the campaign and communications team were. Maybe incompetent is too strong, because what I saw was plainly amateurs trying to catch a master. And they have only gotten slightly better. Their real expertise is snatching defeat out of the jaws of victory.