Under Attack

I had contingency plans for many emergencies likely to strike during my absence. But tiny disgusting insects congealing to my children's heads was one I hadn't figured on.

My husband and I had just landed in New York for a weekend getaway, our
first in three years. After working day and night for a week to get ready
for the trip, I felt heady with excitement. I had even managed to get
through airport security without having to take off my shoes or surrender
my tweezers. Life was good.

We were still in the car heading to the hotel when my cell phone starting
thrumming in my purse. I sensed this was a bad development. The only
people who call me on the cell phone are my kids, and they only call to
alert me to a crisis, such as the discovery that we are out of ketchup and
it's hot dog night.

I answered fearfully, the way one does when one suspects it's the principal
calling again, saying it's time to reconvene to discuss young Cheyenne and
her "need for excessive socialization during class."

"Hello, Mommy?" It was my charming young daughter. "Bad news, Mommy. Me
and the boys have lice."

Now I like to think I'm a pretty good mom, and as such, I had contingency
plans for many emergencies likely to strike during my absence, such as ear
infections, civil unrest and earthquakes. But tiny disgusting insects
congealing to my children's heads was one I hadn't figured on.

"You have LICE???" I fairly screamed across the nation. "Are they sure?"

"Yeah. You need to pick us up. They don't want us in school."

"I can't pick you up, because you are in Los Angeles and I'm on the Long
Island Expressway!" After stating this simple fact, I broke down in tears.
Why had the good Lord done this to me? I tip fairly. I hold doors open for
people. I don't even eat the last donut in the box, and don't think that's
an easy thing. Where was the justice in this?

Talk about a bad hair day.

For the next several hours, I cursed the fact that I hadn't coughed up the
extra few bucks for the national calling plan on my cell phone, because I
had to make about 75 calls, all of which entailed crippling roaming charges. But I had no choice. Hours of time spent making elaborate childcare and sleepover arrangements were down the drain. Who would take my plague-infested children now?

I started calling in favors (real and imagined) from friends and relatives. No amount of pleading, begging or groveling would be beneath me. It would take a village to de-louse my children. And the villagers would have to -- I was on vacation!

I mean, talk about a bad hair day.

But that wasn't all. Because, as everyone knows, once lice are in the
house, you also have to launder every scrap of material under the roof,
every stitch of clothing, bedding, and teddy bear, (no matter how fragile).
Or, if you are unwilling to do 450 loads of laundry, you can simply take
all the contents of your household, including the children, and have them
hermetically sealed for two weeks, after which time experts claim it is
safe to unseal them.

After knocking back a few margaritas later that evening, I basked in the
comfort of knowing that I had real, true friends, the kind who buckled
under the pressure of hearing my cries of desperation. I had friends who
actually came over to lather up my kids with expensive anti-lousing agents
and launder my every possession.

I also discovered who wasn't my friend -- namely, the Commandant of Lice at the school. She was the one who at first told me not to worry, she would take care of my kids till the end of the day until their carpool picked them up. She made it sound as if she were just doing it because she was filled with the milk of human kindness.
She then presented me with a bill for 250 smackers upon my return for services rendered.

I still didn't get off so easy. Even now, two weeks later, yucky things are
still hatching on my kids' heads, we are still laundering like crazy and
oiling each other's heads. Feeling paranoid, I even had the kids begin to check my own scalp, which they were happy to do and which elicited many gasps of "Oh my God! I didn't know you were so gray!" and "I think I see something! Oh, never mind, I think that's just rust."

We are now resorting to more drastic measures, and one of my sons now
sports a military crew cut. If these diabolical creatures don't stop
erupting in our hair, the rest of us will do the same thing, and I will end
up looking like Sigourney Weaver in the movie "Aliens." (Well, since she's
eight inches taller than me maybe I won't look exactly like her, but once you're walking around with a shaved head, who notices the rest of you, anyway?)

All this goes to prove one thing, in my opinion. During these times when
many of us still fear the threat of domestic terrorism during air travel,
we don't even know the half of it. The real danger may be nesting in our
kids' hair.

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About the Author

Judy Gruen is the author of several books, including the newly released The Skeptic and the Rabbi: Falling in Love with Faith. Her work has appeared in the Wall Street Journal, Chicago Tribune, Los Angeles Times, Boston Globe, Jewish Action, and many other media outlets. She is also a writing coach and book editor. Read more about her at www.judygruen.com.

My Christian friends are always speaking about “faith.” To me this sounds a lot like blind faith. Is that really the essence of religion?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

I'm afraid that this is another case of a Christian concept being mis-associated with Judaism.

Let's first define our terms. What is faith?

Webster defines faith as "Belief without proof."

What is knowledge? "An acquaintance with truth, facts or principles through study or investigation."

Faith is usually a product of desire. Have you ever gotten a tip on the market that guarantees you're going to triple your money in a month? A lot of smart people have gotten fleeced because they ignored the evidence and went with their feelings.

Knowledge, on the other hand, is based on evidence. We know there's a place called China because we have too many products in our house saying "made in China." There's a lot of evidence for the existence of China, even though most of us have never been there.

Judaism unequivocally comes down on the side of knowledge, not faith. In Deuteronomy 4:39, the Torah says: "You shall know this day, and understand it well in your heart, that the Almighty is God; in the heaven above and the earth below, there is none other." (This verse is also contained in the prayer, "Aleynu.")

This verse tells us that it is not enough to simply know in your head, intellectually, that God is the Controller of everything. You must know it in your heart! This knowledge is much more profound than an intellectual knowledge. God gave us a brain because he wants us to think rationally about the world, our role in it, and our relationship with God.

A conviction based on desire or feelings alone has no place in Judaism. The Hebrew word "emunah," which is often translated as faith, does not describe a conviction based on feelings or desire. It describes a conviction that is based on evidence.

Once this knowledge is internalized, it effects how a person lives. A person with this knowledge could transform every breathing moment into a mitzvah, for he would do everything for the sake of the heaven. But this is not a "knowledge," that comes easily. Only intensive Torah learning and doing mitzvahs can achieve this knowledge. Every word of Torah we learn moves us just a little bit closer to that goal. And everyone is capable of that.

To learn more, read "The Knowing Heart," by Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto (Feldheim.com). This entire book is an explanation of this verse!

In 350 BCE, the building of the second Holy Temple was completed in Jerusalem, as recorded in the biblical Book of Ezra (6:15). The re-building of the Temple had begun under Cyrus when the Persians first took over the Babylonian empire. The re-building was then interrupted for 18 years, and resumed with the blessing of Darius II, the Persian king whom is said to be the son of Esther. The Second Temple lacked much of the glory of the First Temple: There was no Ark of the Covenant, and the daily miracles and prophets were no longer part of the scenery. The Second Temple would stand for 420 years, before being destroyed by the Romans in 70 CE.

You shall know this day and consider it within your heart(Deuteronomy 4:39).

Business people who are involved in many transactions employ accountants to analyze their operations and to determine whether or not they are profitable. They may also seek the help of experts to determine which products are making money and which are losing. Such studies allow them to maximize their profits and minimize their losses. Without such data, they might be doing a great deal of business, but discover at the end of the year that their expenditures exceeded their earnings.

Sensible people give at least as much thought to the quality and achievement of their lives as they do to their businesses. Each asks himself, "Where am I going with my life? What am I doing that is of value? In what ways am I gaining and improving? And which practices should I increase, and which should I eliminate?"

Few people make such reckonings. Many of those that do, do so on their own, without consulting an expert's opinion. These same people would not think of being their own business analysts and accountants, and they readily pay large sums of money to engage highly qualified experts in these fields.

Jewish ethical works urge us to regularly undergo cheshbon hanefesh, a personal accounting. We would be foolish to approach this accounting of our very lives with any less seriousness than we do our business affairs. We should seek out the "spiritual C.P.A.s," those who have expertise in spiritual guidance, to help us in our analyses.

Today I shall...

look for competent guidance in doing a personal moral inventory and in planning my future.

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