I know I haven’t been as good a blogger lately, but I’ve been feeling like shit, been insanely busy and having a mini creative rut. Tonight, Jamie made me feel a whole lot better, by showing what he really thinks about my intelligent mind-

I shudder to think of what our children are going to turn out like.

I’m getting a film back tomorrow, with some good shots (I hope) of friends and Melbourne. Will scan/post/attribute words to ASAP.

Please, when reading this, understand that I am aware that the application of photoshop can result in some magnificent art, and some artists, for example Bastien Biomechanical Artwork (B. in my blogroll, who I will blog about later on) use digital manipulation in an incredible way. I just get quite frustrated with its overuse and the reliance that people now have on it, particularly when it is used to make their images LOOK like they were taken with film. It is one thing to make photography and image manipulation very accessible to everyone, but photoshop can really taking the artistry out of photography.

“I’ll be an artist yet”

I am yet to understand why people seem intent on ruining photography.

I went to a photographic exhibition a while back, paid my $2 donation at the door, and ended up walking out after 10 minutes in pure awe. not awe, as in “zomg what amazing work, I am truly inspired to better my own” awe. Awe, as in “wtf? I don’t even know what day it is anymore.”

The majority of photos in the exhibition were well taken, with great lighting, subject matter and composition. I was quite impressed with one of the featured photographers, a man called Bradley King- gorgeous black and whites of candid moments and beautiful macro shots with amazing vibrant colours. His photos, although edited digitally, seemed untouched- as though you were looking through the lens yourself at the moment he had captured. Beautiful photography.

The remainder of the work had the potential to be what I would consider “aesthetically pleasing”. That was until the photographer decided they would “move with technology”. They bought Adobe Photoshop CS4 for a cool $800 at Harvey Norman, took a night course, and learnt how to make their photos look like a three year old scribbled on it with a metallic pen, and then threw up on it. I have taken the liberty of taking these steps myself, somewhat-

-downloading photoshop for a cool $0

-playing with it for half an hour

-ruining a perfectly good photo

and I have included a demonstration of how you, too, can become an exhibited digital photographer.

In other news, I got home today and realised that the night before, someone had jumped on top of my car, cracking it and leaving footprints. This is but two weeks after my Valentine’s day package was stolen out my mailbox and thrown in the creek. ARGH. I live really close to the centre of town, which is great. Coincidentally, I also live near said creek, which appears to be some form of overpopulated haven of chroming youths with a penchant for methylated spirits and plastic jackets.

In my search for an appropriate term for these pieces of scum, I went to no other than Urban Dictionary. Upon searching the term “tiprat” I was then linked to the term “Westie”. The first, and voted as most accurate, definition that came up was-

A very under mannered person dealing in drugs and wearing raggy clothes eg: Dada!!!! Mainly found in Wendouree WEST, Ballarat.

“Get out of my garbage bin you fucking westie, it’s not my fault you couldn’t be fucked picking up your Centerlink payment”

Also in the top ten, was-

A westie is a person that wears clothes such as dada, starts fights (mainly in the rotunda outside Bakery Hill McDonalds, Ballarat), deals and uses drugs. The male version of a westie can vary, having tattoos, piercings, is involved with more than one girl and is most likely a father to a child somewhere. The female version of a westie, tends to have more than one child to many different fathers, they may have tattoos and piercings and tend to mouth off at other females.

Westies are generally found in Wendouree West, but can also be found in other comission houses in the Ballarat area.
They have common unoriginal names such as Steph and Joe.

You fucking westie! Get your drug-fucked head out of my fridge, and get out of my house!

Quite hilariously, I live around 3 blocks from Bakery Hills McDonalds, Ballarat.