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Monthly Archives: December 2009

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Since yesterday’s poster was a bit on the aggressive side, I thought that today we’d look at something a bit more user-friendly, if still a slight be scary.

No, this is not a promotional poster for the two-headed man at a turn-of-the-century freak show (although, if it were, I’d be first in line — there’s nothing I love more than sideshow deformities). It’s simply a bit of ephemera, more caricature than poster, of two little-known but very important members of the musical Belle Epoque in France.

Our dual-headed, well-dressed chappy is comprised of none other than the dynamic duo Ludovic Halevy and Henri Meilhac. Names not familiar? Well, perhaps you are familiar with the opera Carmen.

They wrote the libretto.

And for anyone that knows opera, that puts them right up there with the likes of Callas, Pavarotti, Levine, Puccini, Wagner, and a myriad of other opera gods. Ok, maybe not that high up on the totem….but still pretty darn cool.

You’ll also notice that none other than Jacques Offenbach, the subject of my dissertation, is peddling as fast as his nobby knees can carry him behind our Cerberus-inspired friends (ah, you see the real reason I chose this poster — gotta plug my thesis). I promise you this is a less-awkward cameo appearance than Ron Howard in Jamie Foxx’s music video for ‘Blame It.’ You see, Offenbach hired this comedic team to give words and lyrics to some of his best-loved operettas, including Orphee aux Enfers (for which, incidentally, Jules Cheret did a nifty little poster) and the epic La Grande-Duchesse de Gerolstein.

Alas, as with most Siamese-twin-like relationships, it always ends badly. Meilhac and Halevy not only separated themselves from their beloved composer-friend Offenbach, but ultimately from each other. So, really, this poster is a reminder of a famous friendship gone awry — something nearly as melodramatic as one of their operettas.

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Welcome back my Poster Children! Yes, I know, I’m a day later than promised, but you really have no idea how hectic a poster gallery can be after the holidays. Besides, I have the sniffles, so energy and lucid writing are not my forte right now.

Anyway, how was your Christmas break? I hope Santa got you everything you desired. If not, perhaps you should take a lesson from this auburn-haired lady:

She seriously did not like what her boyfriend got her. Can’t you just picture the lead-up to this moment? Sitting in front of the tree after dinner, exchanging romantic words, candlelight….ah, tis the stuff only Hallmark could dream up.

They hand each other their gifts simultaneously. A smile spreads across his face — courtside season tickets to the NBA, an Hermes tie, and the keys to a Maserati!! Oh, the guys at work will be so jealous! And what did our little lady get? Oh……a candy bowl…..from Pottery Barn. It’s probably a regift from his office’s Secret Santa event the week prior, too.

Scowl at him sister, he deserves it. But no tears — there is lemonade with your lemons! You see, that is the perfect sized bowl for a damaging-but-not-lethal splash of acid, great for killing the paint job on Italian sports cars and boyfriend’s faces alike.

Oh, you think I’m kidding. No, dear Poster Followers, I’m not — this print by the famous Grasset is truly titled La Vitrioleuse (i.e. The Acid Thrower). And I think she’s just fab — after a lifetime of all girl education, I’ve been looking for an appropriate strong female roll model, and I think I just found her.

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Well, my dears, your Posterette is going to leave you for a few days — til next Monday, to be precise. I promise to eat a goose in your name, though, and maybe throw some tinsel at my sister.

In an effort to keep the Christmas spirit alive, here’s a little holiday poster I dug up:

Although it’s quite obviously a poster for Alan Ayckbourn’s lesser play, “Season’s Greetings,” I like to think that it’s symbolic of much, much more. And since it’s in Polish (and I doubt many, if any, of you read the language of my ancestors), I can totally tell you that it’s for something entirely unrelated and get away with it. Here are my thoughts:

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In my endless journeys into the depths of our storage room, I recently uncovered a group of a half-dozen or so posters by the French artist Richez. Never heard of him? Well, neither have I — but I feel this is a huge oversight on both our parts, one which I’m about to remedy. Ahem:

This is his poster for a production of Herbert Achternbusch’s short play Ella. Why did I pick this poster, you ask, out of the multitudes of Richez posters I mention above? Well, for starters, I have a dear friend, Ella, who really likes eggs. I also have the sniffles today, making my head feel like its encased in a giant impermeable shell…..and, I also really like the British gameshow Eggheads. If those aren’t legit reasons to write about art, I don’t know what are.

My personal pleasures aside, this poster is pretty neat-o. Who doesn’t wish humans came from eggs? Who doesn’t want rabid-rabbit eyes? Who amongst us isn’t a little cracked? For all those reasons we should, symbolically, find simpatico with Mr. Richez’s shelled being.

Then, of course, there’s always the play the poster is advertising to add to its awesome credentials. For those out of the German avant-garde loop, Achternbusch does some pretty weird stuff. He’s like your drugged-out artsy college friend with a better budget. In this particular instance, you’ve got a one-act play in which a man (dressed up as his Mutter) tells the tale, from her perspective, of how she was continuously beaten by her father until going insane. So yeh….I guess that’s a cross-dressing egg being within said shell. All the more reason to make sure your local farmer does the egg candling test to make sure your omelet isn’t accidentally full of mini crazy people. At least, that’s my main concern after seeing this poster.

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If I weren’t such a cultured Posterette, I’d think, judging by this poster, that Gstaad is just a really long acronym for the Swiss equivalent of our Child Protection Agency.

Give me one scenario where this scene is appropriate. Just one. In fact, just one wouldn’t be enough because we’ve got all sorts of questionable behavior going on in this poster.

First off, there is obvious evidence of neglect. Other than some rather fashionable little white goatskin booties, this tot is totally underdressed for a Swiss winter. Even the Octomom manages to dress her kids before releasing them in the wild. I’m surprised little Fritz here isn’t shivering in a ball on the mountainside like a help the homeless poster. Then again, he doesn’t exactly look like he’s going to starve anytime soon (just check out those beefy gams!), so maybe he’s like a baby walrus….or something.

Moving on, what the hell is Fritz wearing?! I’m sensing that the hills may be alive with the sound of pedophilia. No adult should encourage a little boy to channel his inner Freddie Mercury, and combined with the whole “alone on a mountaintop” scenario, I just feel that this may not be the best poster to have on your wall when DYFS stops by.

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As you’ve probably already concluded, I really like writing about the Polish Cyrk posters in our inventory. This mostly stems from the fact that they’re some of the most bizarre posters we’ve ever seen, perfectly lending themselves to my somewhat obscure analysis.

This poster is no exception.

Note that there are no less than 4 potential disasters looming on the horizon for this poor unicyclist.

1. Square wheel equals no ride. Unless you’re on uniformly bumpy terrain (on which she certainly does not appear to be), she’s a half-pedal away from stopping short. All her unicycling dreams shattered like a glass a Jewish wedding….and no Mazel Tov in sight.

2. The spaghetti-like nature of her legs would imply that she has no skeletal structure. This is generally considered not to be healthy or practical.

3. I would imagine she finds it somewhat demeaning to carry around an inflatable sign that says “Cyrk” above her head….like she’s the loneliest circus in the world. I equate it to the dunce cap.

4. This is a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen. Even with the proper use of pasties and bra-tape, there is no way a heavy Rumba jacket will stay shut without some sort of button closure. This Polish circus is about to become a Polish burlesque show…..not that we’re complaining, but she kinda looks like Cher…and there’s only so much nudity from that girl we can handle every decade.

All that aside, this is still one of our weirdest and most amusing Cyrk posters — we’ve only got one copy so buy it while you can!

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So we’re planning on putting this poster in our next Modern Sale (everyone, mark you calendars — February 11!!).

However, given its current lack of text, we can’t quite come up with a title. Since I have such an intelligent fan-base, I thought perhaps you all could help. So…..what do you think?

Just in case modern graphics elude you, let me explain what’s going on in this poster. You’ve got your standard all American, red-blooded cowboy on the left and your ever-stoic British Yeoman guard on the right. Somehow, though, they’ve managed to mix up their hats.

I can’t quite tell if this is some awkward childhood dress-up accident or a sort of sweet commentary on Brit/Yankee relations. Mayhaps a new take on the old adage “if you walk a mile in his shoes”….only with hats (which is far less smelly, frankly). Then again, it could be the equivalent of an international pissing contest, seeing who has the biggest “hat.” Yes, that was an innuendo….sorry mom.

Anyway, I’m hoping someone is more creative than me out there — no poster should ever be without a title! I promise everlasting poster glory to the winner.

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What the hell was Charlie doing at the Stop n’ Shop?! Some casual intravenous drug use in Aisle 3? Perhaps some sampling of the check out girl’s blue plate special? I bet there’s a butcher innuendo I could put in there, too, but some things I just can’t bear my mother reading. Either way, Charlie must be shopping at one craaaaazy bodega because the chances of blood-to-blood contact at the Whole Foods by me is slim to none most days (I say most days because you really don’t want to be the last girl buying challah at Zabar’s on Shabbat — those mothers of four on the Upper West will seriously kill you).

Yes, I know, I’ve written about AIDS posters before…but that was a Russian AIDS poster. This is from New York City.

I know, it’s not nearly as imaginative as the one done by our Soviet buddies, but really — are we a society in touch enough with our artistic side to appreciate the wonder that is the AIDS harpie? This poster is far more sedate, matter of fact — a bread & butter American soap opera scenario.

Not only does it warn you against AIDS, but is also sneaks in the fabulous conservative doctrine that if you cheat on your spouse you may die a horrible death. If only I could convince my boyfriends of that, my life would be so much easier….but it’s sort of like trying to convince a 20 year old that if they make a horrible face it might stay that way….which is why I will die alone.

Anyway, I hope you all saw this poster in grade school during health class — I imagine it was fairly popular with the D.A.R.E. crowd. If not, we’re selling our only copy!!

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Sometimes we all forget that many poster artists did more than just create posters. Cheret illustrated menus, Eula designed clothes, Mucha drew up fantastical furniture. Our dear friend Savignac is no exception.

In the 90s, he did this rather bizarre series of Christmas and New Years greeting cards. Looking through them, I’m not sure if I’m meant to be offended, confused, or charmed — and most of the time, I’m all three.

Here are just a few of my curious favorites:

Yes, that’s a Japanese car anally raping one from the European Union. I sense it was a tense year for international relations…..and Japan may have asserted their authority. I suggest sending this to your grandparents this holiday season.

This is why certain Christian religious sects ban Santa from Christmas — he’s obviously in cahoots with the devil….sort of the Shane of the North Pole. Please look at this postcard while listening to Nick Cave’s Red Right Hand, a song about the devil coming to town with presents. Appropriate, no?

Oh yes, this is my absolute favorite in the series — a sexy little heifer, popping a cork to ring in the New Year. She reminds me of me….but without pants.

To see the rest in the series, you should visit our ebay store — they’re available as the complete set and possibly the best way to say Happy Holidays since the singing telegram.

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Although not the most expensive posters in our inventory, the images put out by Bill Graham and the Family Dog are certainly some of the most captivating. In the words of my boss, they’re “beyond beyond.”

Now, while I don’t really have much love for Procol Harum (A Whiter Shade of Pale failed to move me), and the Buddy Miles Express only makes me want to consider a career as a GoGo dancer, this poster for their joint show by Greg Irons seriously blows my mind.

Perhaps I’m just drawn to it because I’m reminded of two very prominent moments in my childhood. The first, when I became obsessed with the movie Flight of Dragons — oh yes, as you can see, the evil Ommadon and this mountain creature have tons in common visually. Only the 60s and 70s could take the same general idea and present it as both an ad for a rock show and the basis of a kid’s movie.

The second (yes, yes, I said two prominent moments in my childhood), when I took a barge trip through France at the curious age of ten. We spent an entire day in complete darkness as we passed through the interior of a mountain — and when you’re ten, spending more than 2 hours in a tunnel makes you think you’re on the boat trip to hell.

All that said, it actually seems like Mr. Pink Mountain is actually vomiting out the train as it is going in the wrong direction to be doing much else….so perhaps a happy ending for all is in store. Either way, I love it — and, for those in need of a gift under $300 this holiday season, you really can’t be an original San Francisco Rock poster from the 60s.

Careful, though — I will probably fight you for them.

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Often irreverent, always informative, the Rennert's Gallery Vintage Poster Blog is the only news source covering every aspect of the vintage poster world. From pop culture to haute couture, if it has to do with posters, you’ll find it here.