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I have failed with 515 on my shoulders and it pushed my ass to the floor and i had to weight for some side spotters to grab it quick. (my fault i should have asked them to get in place pre lift) This strained just about every muscle in my core, blood soaked my eyes for over a month and forced out a case of Shingles due to the stress.

I also have had 365 drop on my chest nearly on my neck and had a spotter who couldn't pick it cuz he can bench but apparently can't dead. Once again had to have side spots jump in quick. During the lift my elbow unexpectantly buckled and the weight dropped in a split second.

I guess my point is once you have failed miserably and relize its not as bad as you think you can mentally push yourself harder without fear. No matter what happens in the gym i know i will recover and i won't get to where i want to be without pushing the absolute limits of what my body can do. Fear has no place in that equation. I respect the iron but i don't fear it.

I always find myself ultra focused and mentally sharp when attempting heavy weights. I find that I tend to not take lighter weights as seriously. For heavy weights I lift with an intensity and focus that I wish I could have in everyday life.

Today was one of "those days." My body was not cooperating. My ankles were extremely tender and my hips were bothering me a bit. On top of that I have picked up a very mild amount of tendinitis in my right knee.

The weight felt heavy on my back and my mind was telling me to quit. These types of days I have to lift with authority and confidence. If I would have half-assed things today I would have picked up an injury.

Days like today I have to drop in the hole believing that if I lift how I normally lift I will be ok.

What my buddy Jake(he's a strong cat) told me a few months ago when I was just messing up on my squats out of complete fear.

"since you have more strength than your squat accounts for, you just need to attack the bar more aggressively! As soon as you decide that it's time to squat, then it's time to f'ing squat. There are no interruptions, there is no second-guessing, you are king of that gym. Grip the bar hard, tune everything out and realize that your weakness is just mental."

I still haven't mastered this, but it's coming slowly and it's helped quite a bit when I can get that attitude. It may help anyone else who has a problem with a certain lift.

Couple of months ago I worked up to 100kg on the bhn PP working in triples. 90 for 3 was ok but i got in doubt once 100kg was on my trapz and failed at the first rep an inch above my head and it came crashing down on trapz again.

... racked it, MTFU and did it for 3 explosive reps for a PR. Its very much mentally, if Im in doubt about lifting a weight. I will fail.

Couple of months ago I worked up to 100kg on the bhn PP working in triples. 90 for 3 was ok but i got in doubt once 100kg was on my trapz and failed at the first rep an inch above my head and it came crashing down on trapz again.

... racked it, MTFU and did it for 3 explosive reps for a PR. Its very much mentally, if Im in doubt about lifting a weight. I will fail.