Month: July 2013

I’ve got new hag hair! Well, it’s of course the same hair as before (got to be careful not to start any “Sibylle is wearing a wig” rumours, haha!), but it’s a good bit shorter. What do you think? I’m still slightly shocked at how very short it is but I have to admit that I like it.

Today I’d like to tell you about something that’s been bugging me for a while. I only talked about it once so far, and that was last month when I gave a talk at the Pagan Pub Moot in Dublin. I was speaking about my own pagan roots in the German-speaking countries, most especially the two amazing women Luisa Francia and Judith Jannberg. They each have their very own brand of magic, their personal, solitary path, and very strong and solid opinions. They are also both feminists, in the sense of re-discovering and re-asserting female magic which has all but disappeared from our culture.

I love their particular brand of feminism, which is infused with witchy magic. I refer to myself as a feminist too, mostly because I recognise the need to work with what I have, and I happen to live in a woman’s body with a woman’s soul. Both women and men can only profit when women refuse to adhere to the implicit standards we STILL have ingrained in our souls after the centuries of being disempowered and voice-less. We’ve stripped off the outward bonds in the last 100 years or so, but in our souls we often still feel trapped. A woman who has freed herself and is soaring, a woman who is powerful-from-within is a wonderful thing to behold.

Many of us have come to realise that whilst women were definitely worse off in the centuries of oppression, being the powerless of the sexes, it is still true that men have also been forced into rigid, stereotypical roles, and they still are to an extent. So we’re all repressed in a way, but after decades of feminism, many women have become very aware of the limitations society’s perception and our own acceptance of them still place on us. We have developed fine-tuned sensors against discrimination and a high level of self-awareness.

What I’m wondering in all this is: Where is masculinism?

As I stated above, men too have been oppressed. Just like women are supposed to be the pretty barbie-dolls, men are supposed to be Ken with rippling muscles and fancy cars, and of course a large income to take care of the barbie-woman who’s of course incapable of looking after herself. All these stereotypes have never been true, and have never been less true than they are today.

I adore men. I also know for a fact that many are uncomfortable with the existing stereotypes. So why aren’t men rebelling? Why aren’t they forming men’s groups, go on marches, explore their masculine magic? I am waiting for the movement to start, because this world needs evolved men and as well, there are scores of evolved women who are longing for a wild man, not to “rescue” them or take care of them, but to explore an incredible life together free of rigid expectations and limiting beliefs.

I’m a masculinist as much as I’m a feminist! The time is ripe. After the much needed phase of female self-definition (which is still ongoing of course, because this kind of thing never ends or is “done”), we need men to break free, too. What this will look like in detail I wouldn’t presume to even guess, because as a woman, there’s no way I could possibly know. What I do know is this: All human beings who “find themselves”, who dare to dicsover who they truly are and stick to that uncompromisingly, turn out absolutely beautiful and awe-inspiring. I have seen it in women, and I’m looking forward to seeing it in men.

I’ve got my 13 Moons course in which women explore their divine femininity – I want to see a guy offer “12 Suns” to discover the divine masculine! Will it happen? I’m sure it will, and I hope I’ll be around to witness it.

P.S. Edit later: I’m not saying that there are no evolved men (I am privileged to know quite a few). What I’m saying is that we need a movement. It’s dang hard to be self-aware and go against society’s grain AND be alone. There have always been free-spirited women, but it was only when they got organised that real changes started to happen.

Ze hag is back from her holidays! Actually, I never really went away but I had a week off and went to see lovely friends and attend lovely dinners and hug and chat and generally have a great time, plus spend many hours vegged out at home with the budgies. I didn’t do one bit of work and really got to re-charge my hagish batteries. Bliss!

Now I’m back at work and my everyday life, and I feel a new focus. Like everyone else, I sometimes need to remind myself of the big picture, the long-term goals, and the things that really matter in my life. And so I thought I’d share with all of ye, that my dream is and remains to live in a beautiful timber house with my budgies, somewhere beautiful and preferably in Wicklow (although I’m told it’s absolutely impossible to get planning permission for a wooden house in Wicklow). It’ll be the house in the picture above, from this company. Here’s the floor plan:

I’ll have a bird sanctuary which I’ll start in the spare room and plan to then move to a separate building in the garden at some point. Whereever it’ll be, there’ll be lots of light and space, a paradise for pet birds of all shapes and sizes, to recover from abuse or neglect in their past.

There’ll be me, a room with a fireplace for rituals and visitors, and another room with the budgies and my computer. And we’ll be so so happy, and I’ll be able to sleep, and I’ll grow my own vegetables in the garden, and did I mention the happiness? I’ll have music and plenty of dancing. And lovely people dropping by, or coming in for a coaching session.

When’s the last time you wrote down your big dream? It’s important to put it out there, you know. Words are powerful magic, and strong intention behind the words is even more powerful. Pagans and other workers of magic have known this for centuries. Today we call it the process of manifestation or The Secret, but it’s all based on the same principle: “It is because I say so.”

It’s as simple and as complicated as that. Simple because it is really rather straightforward; complicated because we tend to think it has to be complicated, and create all sorts of distractions and obstacles along the way. This post is part of my effort to keep it simple, so, here’s my dream! What’s yours?

News From The Tribe

Jessica has this awesome blog where she posts weekly money saving tips on Money Management Monday. Very very useful! It fits right into my theme this week, about focusing on my dream, because saving up money is a major part of that. Thanks, Jessica!

This, my dears, is a chewable toy for birds! Isn’t it soooo cute? As soon as I get paid this month, I’m going to spend a big chunk of it on this and other natural budgie toys and treats from Northern Parrots. What can I say? Other women buy shoes.

I’m a very happy hag these days, as I make my way through the last week at work before a long-anticipated one-week holiday. I’m not going anywhere this time – every year I try to spend one week at home without travelling, getting up early, rushing to the airport and all that – just me and good friends and lots of time with the cutest. This time I’ll also get some small bits fixed on my car and have a check-up at the doctor’s. And that’s it.

I don’t even care if the weather stays as beautiful as it is now. It’s over 20 degrees even here by the coast and even I am leaving my jacket at home these days, but in case it gets “Irish” again next week, I’ll just stay at home, read for days on end, or play WoW nonstop for eight hours like a proper geek.

Some people have actually asked me about my gaming post about a year ago; unfortunately it was on my old-old blog and hasn’t been preserved. Since I’m always looking to improve the public view of gaming, I thought I’d write another piece on it, just shorter and more compact, so here goes.

Yes, the stereotypical “lives in mum’s basement and doesn’t ever see the sun” a-social gamer does exist. Some people get addicted to gaming and lose their touch with the world around. That’s bad, but it’s a. not the norm and b. not the fault of the games. If someone has an addictive personality, they’ll find something to get addicted to. Used properly, games can train analytical and situational awareness skills as well as communcation and teamwork.

What I play is a massively multiplayer roleplaying game. What that means is, there is a fantasy world with different races and history and conflicts, a bit like the Middle-Earth Tolkien created in his books. Only this time, instead of just reading about it, you get to experience the adventures yourself, together with other people. The game is like an alternate reality, a real-time 24/7 world with lots of people logged into it at the any given time.

This social aspect is what interests me most. The endgame content is such that you cannot get far on your own. You have to work with others, in groups of 10 or 25 people, and really co-ordinate and practice in order to achieve the objective. If any one of these 10 or 25 people doesn’t know what they’re doing, the entire project is doomed. Then you get to try again and again, working out the kinks, working together as a group until you are successful. It’s a great feeling when we slay a momentous internet dragon after working on it for weeks – you should hear the shouts and jubilation on our voice-communication device (something akin to Skype, where we all talk to each other to co-ordinate our efforts)!

In WoW you can play different races and “classes” (like mages, druids, warriors…) and each of them has a large set of abilities which work together in an intricate way. Playing isn’t hard, but playing WELL is quite a challenge. There is a whole body of theory- and simulation-craft as well as in-depth analysis (here‘s an example) behind World of Warcraft, and it takes a lot of dedication to become really good at your class. World-class players get sponsored by large companies and are celebrities in the world of gaming.

So what fasicnates me about it? The challenge, for one – I like to strive to get better and learn, and in my opinion it beats passively watching TV any day. I also like the fantasy aspect, and of course I’m friends with my guild mates who are truly awesome people I wouldn’t have met otherwise.

I saw the above view on Saturday, but it didn’t look like the photo. It wasn’t sunny and bright, it was twilight and the sea and sky had almost the same colour, a light subdued blue with a translucent quality. The horizon appeared blurry.

It was completely magical. I walked entranced, the first time I spent time outside since my hayfever started. Thankfully, I was sniff-free for most of the walk. I grounded myself and my body was abuzz with the energies from my “stubborn rock” Bray Head, the sea beneath me, and the endless shifting possibilities of twilight. It was perfect! It was also the first day which felt like true summer to me: I had only left the house at around half past nine, but it was still 19 degrees.

I would love to show you how enchanted the world looked (and was. There was a lot afoot that evening), but I left my phone/camera at home for a reason. I needed to BE there, not process or document. I buried my feet firmly in the grass, watching the sea and listening to the gulls. The spirits were calling out to me, and I answered.

The weather is not as good these days but it’s supposed to get really warm again this weekend – and I’ll have a long weekend too! Last Friday was the last day of our business quarter and I worked until midnight to get it all done. To make up for this, we got this Friday off, which is very decent and makes me all giddy looking forward to three days of budgie-time and hag-time and sheer indulgence with a minimum of housework in the mix.

Gods, how I love this season! Not even my hayfever slows me down these days. I’m surprisingly alert and don’t need lots of extra sleep like I usually do during hayfever weeks. I’m so grateful! I just wish this state, the bright evenings, me not freezing and all that, would last for a few more months at least. Alas, the nights are getting shorter already, but at least summer is here to stay, I hope.

The other thing I wanted to tell you about is that I’m brainstorming heavily about the proposed forum community. Thank you SO MUCH, all who got in touch to express their ideas. I’m listening. And if you didn’t have a chance to voice your thoughts last week, you can still leave comments here on the blog or email me. In the meantime, I’ve come up with a few ideas.

The main theme of your replies seemed to be that you would love to connect more, but don’t have tons of time to spend online. My challenge then is to come up with a concept that will give you maximum benefit in very manageable chunks of time, and I think I’m on a good track here – I’m thinking of work groups, like study groups, where those who are interested can sign up and we’ll work together through either a free e-course or a book or a series of meditations, etc. It’ll require no more than a few minutes’ participation per week, the rest will be done by you – offline.

For those who choose to spend more time online, there will also be general chatty forums and pagan group-tree-hugs (haha! New word!) to keep you entertained.

Joy just posted a wonderfully open-minded and deeply insightful blog about god, goddess, universe, and other names. It shows very clearly why all those “my religion is better than yours” wrestling that’s going on is essentially beside the point!