Special Kids, Their Needs, and Respect.

Thursday, September 1, 2016

You know what's irritating for me? People's assumptions and opinions.
Especially when it comes to me, my kids, or our lifestyle. I will never
understand why anyone feels the need to make comments on what I do for
my children or how they behave.

On the regular, I get dirty looks about Miss Quirky (8). When we have a lot of walking to do, I tend to bring my double stroller along. My toddler doesn't normally use it, but she will if her sister is in it. I bring it along because my kids are aspie's. Overstimulation can ruin a day for them, as they get overwhelmed and anxious. Miss Quirky also has some health issues that affect her being able to walk for extended periods of time. So, today we went to Disney from 10am - 3pm and she walked. But later, when we went to the mall, I let her sit in the stroller. There were three people that I heard say something about her being "too big" for the stroller while in the mall.

Why?

Why do you feel the need to say anything at all about my child?

I see a lot of things that I question..but I do it in my head. Like a normal person. I'm the aspie. I should be the one with the filter problem. Yet, it's the neurotypicals that don't know when to hush.
Why is that?

Another lovely little thing that I encounter even more regularly is people being pushy about their interaction with my toddler (Miss Spunky). She doesn't like strangers. I mean, she really doesn't like strangers. If they talk to her, especially if she is already upset, she will go into full meltdown mode. She will run away into a dangerous area. She will back up and smack her head into things. She will throw herself onto the ground and cover her face in fear. She truly does not like strangers. Yet, when I tell people this, they continue to talk to her!
"Aw, it's okay sweetie."
"Don't worry, I'm not mean."
"Okay, I won't talk to you anymore. You're just so cute!"

Why?

I know my child. I know how she's going to behave. I'm not joking. If I say she doesn't like strangers talking to her, then stop. Immediately. Don't apologize to her. You may apologize to me, as you have just disrupted my child's emotional state and now you get to walk away, while I deal with the repercussions. So, please, do apologize to me. But seriously, do not speak to her. And certainly do not touch her. Just stop. Stop thinking it is appropriate to continue your behavior when I say to stop. These are my kids and you need to respect that. Period.

My kids are sweet. They are smart. They know what they like and what they don't. I know what they can handle and what they can't. This is about respect for them and my right, as their parent, to tell you to go away. Which I will only do if you truly deserve it. But seriously... You don't know know who people are when you are just walking up to them for the first time. You don't know what they're dealing with. You don't know their sensitivities or issues. Be kind and approach with kindness and respect. Then listen to the people you're talking to. Really listen. Take it in and apply it. We, as special needs people, would really appreciate it.