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Tuesday, 14 October 2014

♡ Living With Anxiety ♡

Hello all,

If you follow me on twitter you may have noticed that i've been contemplating a blog post on this topic for months now but finally I believe that I am ready to share my experiences with anxiety with all of you. If this can help just one person i'll be extremely happy. I decided now would be a good time for me to finally upload a post surrounding this topic as just last week was 'Mental Health Awareness week' and Zoe started her campaign of the 'Don't Panic Button'.

About a year ago now I drafted an extremely long post on my old blog however I never got around to posting it. I've now decided it'd be better to give a concise overview of my experiences and if you'd like to know more then i'll create another blog post rather than bombarding you with loads of information in just one post!

So where do I begin? I guess from the very beginning. I started suffering from an anxiety disorder back when I was 7 years old. This first occurred during the transition between infant school and junior. I'd avoid school as well as need a lot of time off due to the symptoms anxiety left me with (severe migraines & tiredness). This all lasted for around a year and then sort of seemed to 'fade away'. I can't particularly remember anxiety dominating my life in years 4,5&6 however I do of course remember times where i'd become overwhelmed by this awful feeling.

In year 7 (aged 11) is when things became particularly bad for me. As of the first week of secondary school anxiety had almost taken over my life and has done ever since (5 years). As part of this mental illness i'd avoid school and my attendance got seriously low. I'd suffer from migraines and tiredness (as I had done previously) making the whole experience even worse and the thought of school was enough to make me extremely upset and cause an anxiety attack. I endured the same secondary school for four years and as I believed that the school was the cause for the stress and worry I decided to move. For most this would make you anxious but for me it was a mixture of excitement and extreme nerves. In fact I couldn't even turn up until 11 am on my first day due to continuous anxiety attacks. Once i'd settled into my new school I realised it was one of the best decisions of my life but did make me realise my anxiety didn't just revolve around school anymore but near enough anything and everything.

I've been visiting the hospital for 5 years due to my anxiety and have been through cognitive behaviour therapy twice and both times at CAMHS. Even though I found this useful whilst it was taking place I find it extremely hard once the course is over as I feel as if you're just left and I rapidly go straight back to stage one again. I'm still suffering from this illness and it still gets me extremely down. I am personally still looking for ways that could help me get through this but I believe talking to people is a great place to start (hence this blog post). So if you suffer from anxiety or any other type of mental illness please feel free to contact me and we can talk about it (information on my 'contact me.' page).

I hope my story has made you realise you're not alone and that i'll always be here as someone to talk to.

Please leave suggestions below if you'd like to see more posts on this subject in the future or tweet me!