Now I’m no scientist or statistician. I have no idea whether the color red inspires insanity in drivers, or if bad drivers are genetically attracted to it. All I know is that whenever I see a driver doing something spectacularly stupid, he’s doing it in a flaming red automobile.

But after reading this article about red cars and bird poop, I’m starting to feel a bit sorry for those drivers:

Research in five cities found 18 per cent of red cars were marked with deposits, followed by blue (14 per cent), black (11 per cent) and white (seven per cent).

For the cleanest ride, the best advice, appropriately, is to go green – just one per cent of that colour was smeared.

But even pity can’t stop me from writing this limerick:

This Limerick’s For The Birds
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s a riveting fact about birds,
Which is likely to trigger foul words:
They like dropping their poo
Upon autos whose hue
Is red — their pet target for turds.