Saturday, January 06, 2007

And Art Makes Five

Well, well, well, what the first thing I see when I cruise over to ESPN.com today...Art Shell getting shit-canned from the 2-14 Oakland Raiders....I knew I shoulda added in Oaktown to my coaching vacancy article...

Ok, so here's a quickee on the RaidersThe Challenge: How to motivate a team who motto has degenerated from a commitment to excellence to a commitment to self-serving mediocrity...(poster boy: Randy Moss)...there is no easy-fix in Oakland...the O-line sucks, the WR are unmotivated, and the current stable of QBs is HOPELESS....the pluses: Defense is NOT your main problem. Rob Ryan, one of Buddy's two def. coordinator sons, turned around an awful defense. The final score of many game might not provide much in the way of hope, but the Raiders D would've been a bigger story had their offense done ANYTHING this season (12 TD in 16 games...gimme a break...Ohio State would've done better)...Lamont Jordan can be a productive centerpiece in the right offense...oh by the way, you have the first pick in the 2007 draft in April, and desperately need a franchise QB - no pressure, just don't fuck this upthe minuses: everything else about the team sucks...Conclusion: There is a ray of light at the end of the Raiders long slow tunnel to hell - the #1 pick overall...the new coach will be faced with a gigantic decision right out of the chute, and one that will determine the Raiders fate for the oh, say the next 5 years....and whether or not said coach will still be around by then...This is the quintessential Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade choice: and you don't want the fans in the black hole chanting "You Chose Poorly" by the end of Dec....(actually, they'd chant something more like "You Chose the wrong guy fuckhead" but I wanted to maintain the integrity of the metaphor). Think about it...Who was the coach that chose Tim Couch first overall? Can't remember can you? (don't worry neither can I, but I think it was Butch Davis)....Who was Andy Reid (head coach, Philadelphia Eagles) first selection? Donovan McNabb and guess what, Big Red is still prowling the sidelines at the Linc because he stab at the draft wound up scoring the best QB on the '99 board...(what to guess what happened to the coaches who selected Akili Smith, or Cade McNown....gone, yup, bye bye....) So hello, Mr. X, head coach of the Raiders, prepare to make the important decision of the coaching career with the first 3 months of your tenure....JaMarcus Russell (Culpepper clone) or Brady Quinn (already deemed Mr. Can't Miss and the second coming of Tom Brady)....hmmmm..the choice is yours.