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Portland Trail Blazers vs. New Orleans Pelicans

Sure, the preseason is fun and all, but there's nothing like raw uncut Blazermania when it’s let loose for real to go runnin' wild all over the Moda Center, brother! Not even the fact that the Blazers' home opener is against the fuckin' New Orleans Pelicans (ugh) can dim the electricity that's sure to keep the crowd sparking like a hotwired car. BOBBY ROBERTS