Author: Donald RumpPublisher: Donald RumpISBN: 1310505667Size: 37.30 MBFormat: PDFView: 2765Download
Celebrating the best of fart fiction, Donald Rump weaves together ten flatulent tales of love, betrayal, flesh-eating cannibals, and everyone's favorite green gas, that are sure to blow you away. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Over 100 pages (approximately 32,000 words). BOTTLING FARTS Could the greatest power… The path to riches beyond our wildest imagination… The key to reaching the highest level of spiritual awareness and happiness… …be obtained by bottling farts??? THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the mild-mannered doctor to snap. GOING DUTCH Barnabus Prim has reached the end of his rope. Drowning in debt and married to an obnoxious wife who can't stand the sight of him, he decides to do the unthinkable. But finding a way to the afterlife proves more difficult than he imagined. MARRIAGE STINKS Mackelroy Puggsley thought he'd heard everything until an odd man named Bilby Bloob shows up in the DMV lobby one morning. When Bilby demands a marriage license for his gassy wife, the old man puts his foot down. Sure, it's one thing to marry your high school sweetheart, but a fart? Who in the world marries farts? GASTROINTESTINAL BLUES Since leaving his posh position at the Department of Motor Vehicles, Mackelroy Puggsley thought he'd smelled the last psychotic fart that nearly killed him. But in his new role as a psychologist, he quickly realizes that the problem is more widespread than he thought. Will a crazed client and his two gassy brides prevent the old man from getting one last piece of nookie before he dies? Or will Mackelroy talk his way out of another hazardous situation and live to see another hair pie? THE WOULD BE ASTRONAUT Hank Larmspitz has a plan. Well, sort of. He's going to be the first man on the moon, dagnabbit, and he's going to do it without the aid of a space suit or even a space ship. THE $500 QUESTION Perkins Deadwood can't believe his ears. His twelve-year-old son just asked for a pet fart for Christmas. And not just any fart, a Spanish fart. Hay caramba! Can the used car salesman talk his son out of it? Or is this Christmas really going to stink? FINDING FLOOFY When a man falls head over heels for a murderous fart, he has difficulty coping with her mysterious departure. Was it something he said? Something he did? Was his penis too small? None of it makes any sense. "I will find you, my darling Floofy. Even if it's the last thing I do!" TILL DEATH DO US FART Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. WEEKEND GETAWAY When Martin Dollop and Arthur Bodine set off for a romantic vacation in the islands, they have no idea what they're in for. Now rotting away in a Mexican jail cell, it appears that they've reached the end of their rope. Even the pinche guard won't do them the honor of putting a bullet in their heads, and offers each a shot of poison to end their suffering. Will the two lovebirds cash in on their free weekend getaway and make things right between them? Or will the doomed couple kill each other in the process? BONUS! Also includes the bonus story I Am Fart.

Author: Donald RumpPublisher: Donald RumpISBN: 1516341775Size: 73.89 MBFormat: PDF, ePubView: 2656Download
Celebrating the best of fart fiction, Donald Rump weaves together four new flatulent tales of love, betrayal, flesh-eating cannibals and everyone's favorite green gas in one dastardly volume. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 14,000 words in all. THE $500 QUESTION Perkins Deadwood can't believe his ears. His twelve-year-old son just asked for a pet fart for Christmas. And not just any fart, a Spanish fart. Hay caramba! Can the used car salesman talk his son out of it? Or is this Christmas really going to stink? FINDING FLOOFY When a man falls head over heels for a murderous fart, he has difficulty coping with her mysterious departure. Was it something he said? Something he did? Was his penis too small? None of it makes any sense. "I will find you, my darling Floofy. Even if it's the last thing I do!" TILL DEATH DO US FART Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. WEEKEND GETAWAY When Martin Dollop and Arthur Bodine set off for a romantic vacation in the islands, they have no idea what they're in for. Now rotting away in a Mexican jail cell, it appears that they've reached the end of their rope. Even the pinche guard won't do them the honor of putting a bullet in their heads, and offers each a shot of poison to end their suffering. Will the two lovebirds cash in on their free weekend getaway and make things right between them? Or will the doomed couple kill each other in the process?

Author: Katherine Goh Pei KiPublisher: Asiapac Books Pte LtdISBN: 9812299165Size: 57.99 MBFormat: PDF, MobiView: 1048Download
Legends of Ji Gong first appeared as a literary work during the Song Dynasty. Funny and entertaining, the stories of Ji Gong had gone a long way in inculcating moral values in the common people. Numerous accounts had been written and published. Eventually, the original writer became obscure. Ji Gong was a peculiar and remarkable character. He was an immortal who made his appearance in the human world and mingled with ordinary folks. Depicted as a crazy and scruffy monk, he always carried a worn-out fan and a gourd of wine. Though a monk, he was fond of meat and wine. In this volume, you will find out how Ji Gong was born and how he became a monk. He did many good deeds--helping a goldsmith to find his long lost daughter, punishing an unscrupulous man, overpowering a boa spirit, exposing a fox spirit, reuniting a couple and rebuilding a tablet hall. You will be amused by the antics of this adorable monk.

Author: John WilliamsPublisher: Pearson UKISBN: 0273748858Size: 15.55 MBFormat: PDF, KindleView: 1027Download
"Do you have a sane work-play balance? Had enough of your job and want to change your life? Here’s how to do it" The Times Stuck in a job that’s boring you to tears? Slogging away at a business that’s never quite taken off? Still can’t decide what you’d rather do? Well, it’s time to change all that. We’ve reached a remarkable point in the history of work. With the right guidance, it’s now possible for anyone to make a living from doing the things they love. Written by a career maverick who escaped corporate life, Screw Work Let’s Play is your blueprint to create a work-life full of fun, freedom and creativity; something more like play than work. Packed full of stories from people who turned their passion into their living – or even a million pound business – you’ll discover 10 secrets to transform your working life, starting today. Discover life-changing ideas and practical plans including: · How to win your first playcheque – without quitting your current job · How to beat the doubts and internal blocks that hold you back · How you can play and get rich – even in a recession Whether you want to start a business, create an ideal job, write a book, or change the world, there’s no need to suffer unfulfilling work any more. Ready to play? Unlock exclusive extras at www.screwworkletsplay.com Join the Play Revolution

Author: Michael HeppellPublisher: Pearson UKISBN: 0273769693Size: 49.70 MBFormat: PDF, MobiView: 7594Download
Sometimes being just ‘good’ just isn’t good enough. Sometimes we all need to be brilliant. In just 90 days, How To Be Brilliant will show you how to change the way you think and behave so that you can embrace every day, every experience and every opportunity with positivity, energy, enthusiasm and inspiration. Michael Heppell, author of the bestselling book Flip It, will introduce you to over 50 amazing tricks, tips and tools that, when properly applied, will move you and your life on to a whole new, exciting level. This is the level where you really shine. It’s the level where you believe anything is possible. And it’s the level where you start living your dreams and becoming the person you always wished you could be. So don’t just be good; learn to be brilliant and discover a better way of being.

Author: Scott GordonPublisher: S.E. GordonISBN: 0983648921Size: 32.75 MBFormat: PDFView: 195Download
A picture book that can only be described as fun and adorable, My Little Pet Dragon features over 30 pages of incredible computer-generated artwork. Find out what happens when the young reader gets a pet dragon for Christmas! A bedtime story for children 3-5 that is sure to delight (even adults will find plenty to smile about)! NOTE: This book includes a bonus puzzle and sneak previews of My Little Pet Dragon Ness and Secret Agent Disco Dancer: Santa's Super Helpers!

Author: Heather PoolePublisher: Harper CollinsISBN: 0062098845Size: 37.45 MBFormat: PDF, MobiView: 2701Download
Real-life flight attendant Heather Poole has written a charming and funny insider’s account of life and work in the not-always-friendly skies. Cruising Attitude is a Coffee, Tea, or Me? for the 21st century, as the author parlays her fifteen years of flight experience into a delightful account of crazy airline passengers and crew drama, of overcrowded crashpads in “Crew Gardens” Queens and finding love at 35,000 feet. The popular author of “Galley Gossip,” a weekly column for AOL’s award-winning travel website Gadling.com, Poole not only shares great stories, but also explains the ins and outs of flying, as seen from the flight attendant’s jump seat.

Author: Sandor MaraiPublisher: VintageISBN: 9781400077748Size: 49.37 MBFormat: PDF, ePub, DocsView: 2805Download
Originally published in 1942 and now rediscovered to international acclaim, this taut and exquisitely structured novel by the Hungarian master Sandor Marai conjures the melancholy glamour of a decaying empire and the disillusioned wisdom of its last heirs. In a secluded woodland castle an old General prepares to receive a rare visitor, a man who was once his closest friend but who he has not seen in forty-one years. Over the ensuing hours host and guest will fight a duel of words and silences, accusations and evasions. They will exhume the memory of their friendship and that of the General’s beautiful, long-dead wife. And they will return to the time the three of them last sat together following a hunt in the nearby forest--a hunt in which no game was taken but during which something was lost forever. Embers is a classic of modern European literature, a work whose poignant evocation of the past also seems like a prophetic glimpse into the moral abyss of the present

Author: Kitty ThomasPublisher: Burlesque PressISBN: 0981943616Size: 52.12 MBFormat: PDFView: 7011Download
" . . . dark, provocative, and glaringly honest . . ." H. Turley, Reader Emily Vargas has been taken captive. As part of his conditioning methods, her captor refuses to speak to her, knowing how much she craves human contact. He's far too beautiful to be a monster. Combined with his lack of violence toward her, this has her walking a fine line at the edge of sanity. Told in the first person from Emily's perspective, Comfort Food is a tale of erotic surrender that explores what happens when all expectations of pleasure and pain are turned upside down, as whips become comfort and chicken soup becomes punishment. DISCLAIMER: This book explores mature themes and is not suitable for those who can't handle them or minors. The author does not condone the behaviors carried out by her characters. What Readers are Saying About Comfort Food: "If you enjoy reading romance lightly drizzled with some vanilla sex and a dusting of fairy tale fantasies wrapped up in a happy ending, then this is probably NOT the book for you. If you want to expand your mind while reading a steamy hot BDSM psychological thriller with an mind blowing ending, then go ahead and give this a try. I dare you." - Wendy G "This is a very unusual and good story that explores themes of power, control, dominance and enforced submission and the psychology of captivity, isolation and reliance, but as it turns out the story is told from the perspective of both the Dominant Master as well as Emily and her journey into submission." -Carocaro "Kitty Thomas took me on a psychologically revealing roller coaster of a ride in Comfort Food. It's a story that explores dominance & control, forced captivity, sensory deprivation, non-con BDSM, & eventual forced submission..." - Angela Wallace "Comfort Food is crazy. Emily Vargas is crazy. Her captor is definitely crazy. And, after reading this book, I think I might be a little crazy. Can a book give you Stockholm syndrome by proxy? Because it definitely feels that way." -Letitia "The exploration of Stockholm syndrome was insightful. To see conditioning techniques successfully applied was fascinating. This is a memorable tale; I certainly have never read a story like it. I read it in a few hours. The erotica was dark BDSM / master-slave." - Sinfunni " I wonder if perhaps I've read so much dark erotica that it's lost some of it's shock value for me. I know that the only acceptable feeling to have towards Mr. Tall dark and nameless is disgust yet I never quite made it there. I'm choosing not to look to far into what that says about me as a woman, but hey, its fiction. That makes it ok. Right?" - Amazon Customer "First let me start out by saying, this is DARK erotica. If you do not like this kind of book, don't read it...i get tired of reading reviews dissing the dark erotica/ dubious consent, stating it was "sooo uncomfortable" well don't read these titles, duh! Now for me, I love it. Dark Erotica is unpredictable, unconventional and most of all a whirl wind of emotions. Furthermore, saying that you could not form an attachment to Emily and Master is like saying you didn't read the book, it was about nothing but Emily and Master. I guess if one is unable to get past the kind of twisted relationship they had, then it would be hard to form attachment." - Amanda Rae "`Comfort Food' is dark erotica. Kitty Thomas is writing extreme BDSM erotic fiction - master/slave masochism without the simulated `tie me up, tie me down' sex games... The Wasabi of Erotica" - Dee18 "I had read novels about bdsm and Stockholm syndrome but not like this. This one ruined many other books for me in that genre, lol, because it was that good (this is the one to beat). Comfort food crossed this little fine line between reality and fantasy . the majority of the books on the capture/kipnap/slavery theme you can view them like fantasy but Ms Kitty Thomas push the envelope taking it to a more realistic and plausible scenario. The severe case of Stockholm syndrome that Emily had towards Master is shocking, and let you wonder when does Stockholm syndrome grows into obsession or love." - Jay Benitez "My first dive into Dark Erotica and Kitty Thomas leaves me begging for more. As disturbing as Comfort Food is, it was also riveting. Emily Vargas has been taken captive, and in order for her captor to break her to his will, he removes the one thing she craves most--human contact. He tortures her with silence and offers comfort with chicken soup. And all too soon, Emily learns what it will take to get her abductor to give her what she craves." - Love, Lust, Books "riveting, sadistic, erotic in its own sense, and just plain excellent." -Kindle Customer "You pretty much can't look up dark erotica without finding Comfort Food at the top of the recommendations, and I'm so glad I took the time to read it. As soon as I started I couldn't stop, and I don't say this lightly, but it was perfect. It was more about the mental stimulation than the sex, though there was sex. It wasn't as heavily detailed or the entire focus of the relationship, however. It was far more about the process of breaking someone, of making them something new, and Kitty Thomas managed this wonderfully." - Michelle "While I have read some dark erotica, this book is the first of its kind. The BDSM world is pretty unknown to me. Aside from the fairly vanilla stuff we see on TVs or movies, this book does not pull any punches and pushes the audience into it." - acid_raine_burns "My exposure to erotica has not been favorable. Enough is enough; and the graphic descriptions of conquests gets boring and overdone quickly. Therefore, I usually avoid it totally. This work on the other hand, was very well done. The psychology of the captive/captor was very well presented. The material was well written and the erotica well placed in the story. The erotica was there but did not dominate or overwhelm the story. This is without a doubt the product of a talented author. I doubt if I will read more erotica; figure I'll quit while I'm ahead. However, this author is worth reading again." Dan C. Boutwell "The eroticism is in some ways explicit but not graphic and tastefully written to allow the imagination to work as well. At first I was afraid Emily's fear would remain the trigger for her obedience but it slowly evolved in to something else, something deeper that conveyed the steep emotions behind the erotic actions. When you strip away everything else, at the core Comfort Food is about a Master conditioning his slave." - Leontine's Book Realm "I would say this story is not for the faint of heart. If you like "Consequences", "Seduced in the Dark" and more of the hard core erotica, Comfort Food will end up being one of your favorites. Even then, this is not a HEA/romance novel so don't go in expecting roses and candy for an ending." - Emily "50 shades of twisted ; very compelling. Very dark and very erotic. Certainly a new twist in the erotic read." - Beckie "I wondered if I really wanted to read a book about someone who was kidnapped but after reading all the excellent reviews and being drawn to BDSM themed books after reading 50 shades, I was absolutely capivated and think this is the best book I have read in a long time." - Megan "Extremely interesting story!! The description is right - this is not HEA or Fifty Shades remake. This is much more of a psychological thriller/erotic story. I won't get into details to ruin it, but I recommend this book if you like to dabble in the dark erotic stories or if you are curious about them - This is a great place to start." - CRFreads5012 "Wow, simply wow! I started this book last night and just finished it. I have to say I was blown away by it. It is not any kind of normal romance novel, so if that is what you're looking for, go somewhere else. The closest thing I can compare it to is Story of O. This is not Fifty Shades of Grey. This is an erotic novel pure and simple, very little romance is in it...If you want a challenging erotic novel, one that may remind you of Story of O, then this is a great book for you. If you want a romance novel featuring a cozy little love story, then pass this one by." - Charles M. Smith II "I have read the Fifty Shades Trilogy and Seduced in The Dark, so the dark side of this book did not shock me too much. I really liked this author's writing, very descriptive and had me really into the book." - Kerri "This was one of if not the most intelligent thought out and well written erotic stories I have ever read. The intelligence and well though out analytical voice of Emily was a welcome surprise to the usual flippancy most "heroines" in stories have. This was written in a way that I can share with friends who don't particularly share my interest in erotica or things BDSM (consensual or not). It was not overly explicit there was just enough to entice, to stimulate through subtlety rather than blatancy. All in all, Kitty Thomas has earned herself a spot on my must read list." - C. Lauer "I agree with another reviewer that it is not a BDSM book, it is about a women who is kidnapped and her control is stripped away one layer at a time. An immensely enjoyable, brilliantly written novel. Highly recommended. Not a romance novel, except in a creepy Stockholm Syndrome way." - Lila "I had an expectation of reading an erotic book loaded with BDSM themes, sex, violence and force. I didn't expect to have to think too much. While there were some of those components throughout, the book was so much more. For me, it became a psychological profile of someone going through an extremely traumatic experience and how she chose to deal with it. Surprisingly, the book changed my viewpoints in some ways, helping me recognize that themes such as a victims response to trauma, may not always be comfortable or conforming to society's norms. The probing of the character's thought processes was unexpected." - Michael "I would still recommend this to those with a particular taste for BDSM and kidnap type books...it was definitely a mind-blower...also I will never look at chicken noodle soup the same ever again." - Sue B. "This is an adult book with dark, disturbing themes of possession, BDSM, Stockholm Syndrome and more. But if you can take it, this book will definitely stay with you." - Chris Jacobs "This is not a run of the mill BDSM story that ends w/a fluffy happy ever after ending. This is a story of submission and surrender - the total capulation of one's self, mind and body to another through force and a will to survive. I had been warned that this was a dark story and it truly is. I wanted something that I could sink my teeth into and not wrapped up in a pretty little package...and I got it. If you looking for something that is soft this is not it. But if you are willing to step off the deep end and are ready for a intense story, this is it." - Jacque "I want to preface this review by saying that I've struggled to finish reading a lot of mediocre books lately. I didn't realize what a gem I had lurking under the benign title of Comfort Food. There was no "struggling" to read Comfort Food. The narrative was smooth and easy to read, and pulled me in immediately. I knew by page 3 that I would not be reading anything else until I finished this book, even though the characters were sometimes difficult to like, and the story isn't exactly nice. Apparently I don't require nice. Some didn't find this story erotic, but I did. I think this is GREAT erotic bdsm, although if you like BDSM light, sweet, 100% consensual, and romantic - then this one might not be to your taste." - Sheri Johnson "As a female reader of erotica I sometimes find, especially in the bdsm genre, the author is too quick to the 'spanking and chains' not this time. The author takes her time to build an actual story and relationship, allowing you to connect with Emily and what she is going through. She manages to touch on each aspect that make the Master/slave relationship so complex without exploitive sex scenes, that are often unnecessary." - Butterfly "Ah...reading this book by Ms. Thomas was like having a feast after being on bread and water. I'm an avid fan of BDSM erotica but it's so seldom that I find a book that a) surprises me and b) impresses me with the quality of writing. This book did both. First of all, there are none of the usual tropes associated with non-consensual slavery erotica. No violence, no lurid fights and unrealistic cruelty, no blatant disregard for the well-being of the enslaved. This "Master" plans and proceeds with so much thought and intelligence (and gentleness) that you are at once both outraged and yet drawn in by this guy. Not that he is completely kind--he isn't. But there's no thoughtless and spiteful brutality, which placed me in a strange imbalance--hating him and yet feeling an unwilling attraction to him too." - Annabel "I love a dark read when I'm in the mood for one, which I was when this book came highly recommended to me. And it is dark. It is erotic. It is BDSM. All things I enjoy in a story." -JennieW "This is very dark literature, unsettling, and not your standard erotica. It is not about BDSM, but rather a genuine kidnapping. It does have an "incomplete" feel to it, but in this case I felt that it enhanced the storyline. It's definitely uncomfortable to read, and yet I suggest it. The erotic scenes are still often steamy, despite the storyline. It's truly about two broken people in a broken society. This prompted me to read more by Kitty Thomas, which has proven to be entertaining." -Gail "Comfort Food is dark, exotic and raw! Told in a very realistic tone, Kitty Thomas masterfully drops the reader into Emily Vargas' carnal and enigmatic tale: a kidnapped woman's journey of becoming a BDSM slave to her own captor. It's not every day that an author can pull a reader across their normal genre and have them so emotionally invested that they can't put the book down, but Kitty Thomas skillfully weaves this tale with a finesse that is truly remarkable, especially given the subject matter." - Tom Wiseman "Disturbing, twisted, and just plain weird . . . " Amy, GoodReads Reviewer " . . . an intelligently written, well-researched and very erotic exploration of the extremity of power dynamics . . . It's refreshing to read someone brave enough to tackle erotic themes that are truly taboo and seldom published." - Remittance Girl, Reader and author of "Gaijin" and other works of erotica "They are a match made in a twisted sort of hell. I don't, as a rule, like erotica, but I'm likely to check out Ms. Thomas' future work just to see how far she can push the envelope." - A Taste For Ebooks, Review Blog " . . . beautifully written and exquisitely detailed . . . a brilliantly written book and I highly suggest it, if you're up for the challenge." - Mama Kitty Reviews " . . . the most twisted form of psychological conditioning, I've ever read . . . will stick in your brain for days after you read it." - Kathleen Gresham, Reader If you like erotica by Kitty Thomas, you may also enjoy Claudia D. Christian and Annabel Joseph. More dark literary erotica by Kitty Thomas: Erotic Novels: Guilty Pleasures Tender Mercies The Last Girl Submissive Fairy Tales (anthology of The Auction, Awakening, and The King's Pleasure) Big Sky Blood Mate Mafia Captive Erotic Novellas: The Auction Awakening The King's Pleasure Note: This work is not 50 Shades of Grey, however, if you enjoy work like 50 Shades of Grey, you may also enjoy Kitty Thomas. If you like Kitty Thomas, consider trying some of these other great authors: CJ Roberts, Tiffany Reisz, Annabel Joseph, Pepper Winters, Anna Zaires, Aleatha Romig, Skye Warren, Cherise Sinclair Kitty writes dark literary erotica, usually with a kinky master/slave theme and a hint of bdsm and captive erotica elements.

Author: Marc LevyPublisher: Simon and SchusterISBN: 1416513116Size: 39.91 MBFormat: PDF, ePubView: 1817Download
Arthur falls in love with Laura, the young woman he discovers in the closet of his San Francisco apartment whom only he can see, after she informs him that her body is in a coma across town, and when doctors prepare to end Lauren's medical care, it is up to Arthur to preserve their magical bond. Originally published as If Only It Were True. Reissue. (A DreamWorks Pictures film, releasing Fall 2005, starring Reese Witherspoon & Mark Ruffalo) (General Fiction)