5 Tips For Success

Let’s face it, there is no sure fire recipe for success. Everyone is different, and success itself can have a multitude of meanings, depending on who you ask.

But one thing is certain – there is no shortage of tips for success on the internet. Do a quick search and it’ll return countless pages of them. But which ones are right for you?

Maybe this will help. I break mine down to just five that work best for me.

1. Focus On Your Shit

When you put all your energy into what everyone else is “in to,” your productivity suffers. Who cares what Stan in Accounting is doing? Unless helping him format his spreadsheets directly affects you or your team, focus on what you need to be doing. And if it is something that falls under you, delegate! It’s not lazy, it’s productive – and focusing on the bigger tasks that you need to do. And save the TMZ updates for lunch breaks.

2. Detach From Things You Can’t Control

You can’t control everything that you encounter in life, but you can control how you react to them.

Enough said – this one is the most overlooked. You have neither control over the weather, nor the asshole that cut you off on the highway. Fuming over it for hours doesn’t change the fact that it happened, so why waste that much energy on something you have zero control of? If it makes you feel better then by all means flip off and curse at the driver, then let it go. Save your energy for more positive things in your life.

3. Learn To Say No

This one might be one of my faves. I once told a friend of mine, “Quit being a doormat. You let everyone at work walk all over you. It’s time to put your foot down and say NO!”

Here’s the thing — when you always say ‘yes’ to work projects, social invites you don’t want to attend, or your second cousin’s baby shower, it ends up having a negative effect on your well-being, and possibly others. I’m no therapist, but there’s a ton of articles on just this topic alone. Anyway, you’re left feeling over-stressed and under-fulfilled.

“I’m a people pleaser! I love pleasing everyone!”

Bullshit, I say! When you constantly say ‘yes’ to everyone, what you’re really saying is their time is worth more than yours. You’re not saying ‘no’ to be mean; you’re saying it to be more productive.

Saying something like “I’m sorry but my workload is at its max right now. Maybe the new marketing intern can tackle that.”

Or, “pirate day at the children’s museum sounds interesting, but it’s not my thing.” Don’t be a puss. No one needs to know why you can’t attend. Don’t let your guilty conscience get to you. If you need to sugar-coat it, then do so. A simple, “Thank you, but, no thank you” will do.

When you start saying no, people will start valuing your time and opinion. And respect you more for it. Win-win!

4. Learn From Your Mistakes – And Move The Fuck On

This applies to EVERYONE!!! Yes, even me! I’m in no way perfect. But I realized a long time ago in order to grow, you need to fuck up from time to time. And learn from it.

Everyone has their fear of something – spiders, heights, crowds, failure. But here’s the thing:

If you ain’t failing, you ain’t growing.

This isn’t rocket science, people. You’ve by now heard this from countless other blogs (check out marieforleo.com for some real inspo). If you’re always playing it safe, you’re more than likely missing out on some epic opportunities. And, yes, you’re gonna fuck up. It’s inevitable. It happens to EVERYONE.

Repeat after me: It’s not failure, it’s experience. Life is all about experiences. And growth. Unfortunately, the two go hand in hand.

If you’ve been putting off learning a new skill, or starting that novel, for fear it fails, do it anyway! It’s life – There’s always going to be a chance you might fail at something.

But then again, you might just succeed.

5. It Doesn’t Have To Be Perfect

I once worked with an artist to get his website up. Mind you; I was his third (yes, third) web designer he had hired to get this project done. But every time we would discuss the next phase, he was continually going back and changing his mind on things that were finalized. I finally said, “It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just get it out there.”

It doesn’t matter if you’re an artist or a copywriter – the point here is not everything is going be perfect when you’re working on it. There will be re-dos and tweaks and countless changes. And that’s ok.

But if you keep putting the brakes on and changing your mind on every little thing, chances are your perfectionism is going to keep you from getting anything done. Newsflash – no one is perfect! Not you, not me, not anyone. So get over it. If you have to enlist the help of a friend or colleague to help nudge (or feverishly pull!) you away from the proverbial safety net, then do it. Trust yourself in knowing that you’re doing the right thing for now.