Tommy Craggs blows the lid off of an NBA scorekeeping conspiracy. 42,387 people remove "assists" as a category in their fantasy leagues as a result.

An opportunistic loon tries to extort Rick Pitino by sullying his not-so-good name with a capital R-bomb. Rick fires back at his accuser for spreading lies, and at the media for perpetuating them, instead of covering, you know, Teddy K or whatever.

Troy O'Leary's ex: Underpaid assistant principal by day, overpriced hooker by night. She offered "something called the ‘girlfriend experience' for $450 an hour, which seems excessive for what I can only assume consists of nagging you for not calling more and wondering why you're out so late."

If only Reggie Miller had channeled the tenacity with which he pursues married women into playing defense for the Pacers, well, he'd probably find himself with a championship ring instead of a restraining order to go with his scarlet letter-in-the-sky.

Hambone makes up for valuable time lost to boring sobriety by sinning the way we all wish we could: with body shots off multiple women. Then he apologizes and goes on a tear .You're welcome, Josh.