Taylor Townsend: You might want to sit down because I have HUGE news and a favor to ask you. Seth Cohen: You like Ryan, and you want my help convincing him to date you. Taylor Townsend: Wow. Seth Cohen: You said he was funny. That was kind of a giveaway. Taylor Townsend: I know. It's crazy. I mean, I've always thought, cute guy, might be good for a night of rough and tumble fun, but it's not like we have anything in common - Seth Cohen: - So ignore it, it's probably just gas.

Taylor Townsend: [explaining her new crush on Ryan] - then, when he helped me with my husband, and he kissed me, it was like Dorothy landing in Oz. Everything popped into Technicolor. Seth Cohen: Ah. Taylor Townsend: [offended] You think I don't know what that means? Seth Cohen: I said "ah." Taylor Townsend: Meaning "Ah, that Taylor. She is so pathetic. Someone's the least bit nice to her and she becomes totally obsessed with them. First me, and then her French husband when he lent her a subway ticket, now Ryan." Seth Cohen: Well, isn't it kinda true? Taylor Townsend: So what? Yes. I have a psychological predilection to become romantically attached to men who are nice to me, due to the fact I was raised by a she-wolf of a mother who practiced emotional terrorism. Does that mean, that if by some miracle, love does come into my life, I should deny it? What kind of person would that make me? What kind of life - Seth Cohen: [tired of her talking] - What do you want me to do?

Ryan Atwood: [dancing and flirting with Taylor] We did not hate you. Taylor Townsend: Oh, you totally hated me. Come on, you were probably the president of the "We Hate Taylor" Club. Ryan Atwood: I was the secretary. I took the notes. Taylor Townsend: [giggles] Ryan, you made a real joke! Ryan Atwood: [smiles] A pretty bad one. Yeah, I made a real joke. Don't tell anyone.

Summer: Pancakes had babies! When did this happen? Taylor Townsend: You didn't know she was pregnant? Summer: I didn't know he was a she. Oh my god... I'm a bad crack mother.

Summer: I told Seth I wouldn't watch 'Briefcase or no briefcase' until he got home, so I'm reading about The Valley. Taylor Townsend: Oh my God, that show's still on? Summer: Just got picked up for five more seasons. You know, these teen dramas they just run forever.

Taylor Townsend: Getting a man is like capturing a wily silverback gorilla in the Ugandan highlands. You see, nature is telling the gorilla to stay in the wild, but both you and I know that that gorilla would be much happier back in the zoo on a normal feeding schedule. But sometimes he's just gotta roar and beat his chest before he'll let you shoot him with a tranq dart.

Taylor Townsend: So, what do Brutus, Judas, Benedict Arnold, Julius Rosenberg, Ethel Rosenberg - although that's debatable - and you have in common? Summer Roberts: We all did what we thought was right?

Taylor Townsend: Oh, hi Lisa! I'm so glad you made it back for prom! Lisa Tucker: Thanks, Taylor! I wouldn't have missed it for anything. Or, almost anything. Taylor Townsend: I thought you did great on Idol. Oh, by the way, do you know where Simon gets those skin-tight V-necks? I totally wanna get one for Seung-Ho.