Tiffany

1. one and only chapter

Tiffany was a diehard groupie sports fan and I had been blitzing her ass for awhile. Everything in Tiffany’s life revolved around sports. Tiffany and her girlfriends would have pop quizzes about who was on the current Dallas Cowboy’s roster. One girl would blurt out a random number and Tiffany would promptly follow with a name. It didn’t matter if a player was first string, backup or on the practice squad. These girls could rattle off every name on the team. They even kept up with the latest trades and acquisitions by the Cowboys. What attracted me to Tiffany was that she was a semi-petite woman. This translated doing acrobatic tricks with her in the bedroom. like as if I was a part of the circus. One evening during a Monday Night Football game, I was on top of Tiffany with my hockey stick in her goal. We were "pucking" with the lights off. However, the room wasn’t completely dark because the illumination from television provided us with just enough light to see each other's faces. Next, I picked Tiffany up like a plate of hot links at a black man’s BBQ. With her legs wrapped around me, I put her against the wall. I started slamming her hole like a Michael Jordan highlight reel. Hence, I was feeling like the greatest to ever play this game. I began putting in so much work; I started sweating like a hooker in church. Suddenly, Tiffany started getting excited. Tiffany: “Oh...Yes, go baby!” I started going faster. Tiffany: “Get it!” My hip thrusts significantly increased in frequency. Tiffany: “Go, baby, go...yes....yes” I went into supersonic speed and sped up as fast as my little hip flexors would allow. I was in Speedy Gonzalez mode. Tiffany screamed at the top of her lungs. Tiffany: “Woohoo!” I released her from my grip. I was 99.9 percent certain that I had just given her the best orgasm of her life. Matter of fact, I would have put my whole life savings on it. In order to confirm, I double checked with Tiffany. Me: “Did you cum?” Tiffany: “Not yet silly. The Cowboys just scored!” FML, my life savings and a .1 percent probability. Me: “The Cowboys? How about we get back to me putting your back against the wall?” Tiffany was till preoccupied by the television. Tiffany: “Hold on for a sec, they’re about to kick the field goal.” This caused Tiffany to take a sip of who-the-phuck-are-you-talking-too. Not surprisingly, she immediately came to her senses. Soon after, we were able to finish what we had started. While lying in bed Tiffany tried to have a heart to heart with me. Tiffany: “I think we need to change up our sex life.” Me: “Change it up?” Tiffany: “I mean I want more flavor, more spice. We always do it in the house. Don’t you have any fantasies?” Me: “Yeah, I fantasize about-” Tiffany: “-I want to do it on the football field. That’s my fantasy.” Me: “The football field?” Tiffany: “Not just any football field. I want to do it in a stadium...on the fifty yard line.” Me: “Are you crazy? What stadium were you thinking? Let me guess Cowboy stadium.” Tiffany: “Not a bad choice. But I was thinking more on the safe side and going to my college stadium.” Me: “Yep, your crazy." Tiffany: “Football is my favorite sport of all time. Since this is my fantasy, essentially we will be playing fantasy football. We can do it outside just like the actual players.” Me: “Why can’t you have an indoor sport as your favorite sport? That way we can do it inside." Tiffany: “An indoor sport like what?” Me: “Well, me personally, I love to motorboat. It's safe. You never hear about any injuries occurring when someone is motorboating. You can even do it the confines of your own home. How about we just motorboat instead of this fantasy football nonsense?” Somehow, Tiffany convinced me to act out her fantasy. Later that week, I drove over to the stadium to see what kind of security the stadium had. Since she went to a smaller school, security personal was minuscule. Like a person planning a bank robbery, I scoped out the perimeter of the stadium and looked for every available entry and escape routes. Next, I brought my findings back to Tiffany’s house and sounded like an army general prepping his soldiers for an ambush. Me: “There is a gate on the south side of the stadium I think we can hop. Security is not the greatest because there is only one campus security patrol car that seems to come around every hour. However, I am not exactly sure how frequently security patrols at night. As long as we stay out of sight, we can get in there, do what we have to do and get out.” That night Tiffany and I set out on our excursion. Like thieves in the night, we dressed in all black and armed ourselves with flashlights. We pulled up to a semi-empty parking lot right outside of the stadium and walked towards the field bringing a blanket with us. Me: “I don’t know if jumping the gate is such a great idea.” Tiffany: “You can’t chicken out now. We're already here.” Me: “Yeah,OK. Let’s just get this over with.” I helped Tiffany climb over the fence and quickly followed. All of the stadiums lights were off. It was completely desolate with no sign of life. If it weren’t for the bright moonlight shining above, it would have been impossible to see Tiffany. As we walked onto the field, we first walked over the south end zone. Me: “OK let’s lay down the blanket right here.” Tiffany: “I want to lay it at midfield...on the fifty yard line. Isn't that what we agreed on? Why on earth would you want to do it in the end zone?” Me: “Because that way I can be scoring while I’m scoring.” Tiffany: “Come on. Grow some balls.” Reluctantly, I followed her to mid-field. Tiffany placed the blanket directly on the 50-yard line. Me: “You sure this is going to work? I mean what happens if we get caught?” Tiffany: “It is a football stadium. Who is really going to catch us in here?” Me: “Maybe...campus security or better yet the police.” Tiffany: “Hurry up and give it to me, we are just wasting time arguing about this. Nobody is going to catch us. I think you are just being scared. The worst thing that will happen is that you might get a charge for trespassing.” At that point it seemed as though Tiffany had bigger balls than I did. I went ahead and gave it a try. We only live once. Tiffany: “You seem very tense, let me help you relax.” Our fantasy football sex started out like we belonged to the AFC West in the NFL. She pulled out my man-in-motion and gave me some Arrowhead as if I was a Kansas CityChief. All of the Arrowhead made me want to do like Oakland and want to Raid-her. Next, I pulled her panties off and like San Diego, I Charged her. I started bucking her ass like a DenverBronco. She went from being a tight end to a wide receiver. While I was making some forward progress. I stopped the play as if I heard a whistle. Me: “You hear that?” Tiffany: “Hear what? Keep going!” Me: “Shh. I hear something.” Tiffany: “That’s all in your head. I don’t hear anything. You are paranoid for no reason.” I got back to my bump and run coverage under the moonlight. This time Tiffany stopped me shortly after I started back again. Tiffany: “I think I hear something now.” Like Phil Collins, we could hear it in the air that night. It just so happened to be the familiar sound of helicopter blades humming throughout the night air. We gazed up in the air looking to see where the sound was coming from. Me: “Can you see anything?” Tiffany: “No.” Me: “Let’s just wait for it to pass us.” The helicopter appeared suddenly above us as if it came through the line of scrimmage on an unsuspected blitz. The helicopter’s spotlight was on. It was apparent that the police were looking for a suspect on the run. Me: “Stay still. Just...don’t...move.” Tiffany: “He can’t even see us. He is looking for a criminal anyway." Me: "What do you think we are right now?" Tiffany: "Let’s just keep going.” The helicopter pilot randomly directed his spotlight toward the field. While remaining undetected, the pilot moved the light around the football field in a circular motion. Meanwhile, Tiffany’s legs were high in the air as if they were trying to get a radio frequency from Saturn. She continued to gaze up at the helicopter. Tiffany: “You think he can see us from up there?” In between all of the shucking and jiving I was doing in Tiffany's wide receiver, I managed to give her some reassurance. Me: “There is no way he can see us. He would have directed the spotlight on us already.” However, it is hard to miss a naked man going third and long between a woman’s goal posts even if it's from the air. Like a bowl of alphabet soup, I ate my words. The spotlight moved directly toward us. Lights, camera, action. The spotlight was now on us as if we were stars in a Broadway play. Me: “We might as well keep going. When you’re in the spotlight you’re suppose to shine.” Soon after making that statement to Tiffany, the Helicopter’s spotlight turned off like electricity in the hood. Then back on, then off. The spotlight flashed on and off five times. Each time the spotlight turned back on, it felt as if there was a sports photographer taking various action shots of me in an actual football game. Flash one- Tiffany’s legs were on my shoulders and her mouth was wide open as if she was yelling audibles. Flash two- Tiffany’s hands were wrapped around my back like she was making a tackle. Flash three- My pelvis dropped back in anticipation that I would be hitting her down field receiver. Flash four- My butt cheeks were squeezed together, my pelvis was forward. My man in motion was lined up all in her neutral zone. Flash five- My footballs were getting spiked all over her backfield. After the fifth flash, the helicopter continued flying over the stadium, looking for the suspect. My heart was beating faster than Pee Wee Herman in front of an adult theater. Me: “It’s time to roll out of her before they dispatch someone out here." Tiffany and I popped up and scrambled for our belongings as if there was a fumble on the field. I threw on my boxer briefs, Tiffany threw on her g-string. Next, I grabbed the rest of our clothes and we sprinted down the field toward the south end zone. Since Tiffany was topless, her titties starting making a rhythmic clapping sound. They seemed to provide their own soundtrack for the moment. The sound caught my attention and I couldn’t help but watch them like Rolex while we were running. Once we made it back to the gate, we quickly climbed over it and put the rest of our clothes on. We scurried back to the car in the parking lot. Once we made it inside the car we sat there for a few minutes to catch our breath and make sure the coast was clear. A few seconds later, we noticed a campus security patrol car pulling up to the stadium. We reclined our seats to prevent from being detected. I peeked my head just over the car's window seal. Tiffany: “What’s he doing?” Me: “He is out of his car and is walking around the perimeter of the stadium with his flashlight." Soon as he was out of sight, I cranked up the car and we sped out of the stadium parking lot. Me: “What an exciting night!” Tiffany: “We have to do this again sometime. I love this kind of fantasy football!” Me: “Since you like it so much, then how about you lick on my Buffalo Bill the rest of the ride home?” Tiffany: "As long as you spike it in my mouth...” Hip hip hooray to every football groupie like Tiffany and the men that can appreciate them.