Sorry Doesn’t Cut It J&J, But I’ll Take the Coupon

I’m working on a post that explains my long absence but this news couldn’t wait: Johnson and Johnson has issued a formal apology for creating a run on feminine plugs.

I complained about alerted people to this problem in my post, “What’s the Dealio Johnson and Johnson?” last February. I had hoped that someone at J&J would send me a personal response to my fantastically worded email, but I’ll just have to accept their personalized video apology, instead.

Go to O.B. tampons’ website, type in your name, and voila! A good-looking nerd will croon a “triple sorry” just for you. I watched it twice (the Canadian version doesn’t seem to be different from its U.S. sister). You’ll enjoy the white baby grand piano, rose petals and heart tattoos. Hilariously excellent.

Thanks to astute OINKtales readers, Kaki, for forwarding me the link to the apology and Meredith, who recommended I purchase my feminine hygiene products from drugstore.com. You warm my dove surrounded heart!

Can you imagine being the dude they hired for the tampon apology song? For the rest of the life when he is dating/socializing conversations will always include this snippet:
“You look so familiar but I can’t place you. Is it possible we’ve met before?”
“No, I’m quite sure we haven’t met before.”
“Are you sure? Really?”
Speaking softly… “I did perform the tampon apology song a few years ago.”
“OMG! That’s YOU! You’re the tampon guy! That is crazy! Wait till I tweet about this, my friends will think this is hysterical. LOL!”

At least his date/social companions will know he can deliver over-the-top apologies with fake sincerity and a straight face and prepare themselves accordingly. This video reminded me a little of that SNL skit with Michael Jordan – the one on the beach with the girl who tells him, “You know, Michael, sometimes, I get this not so fresh feeling.” One of my favs. Right behind all the Justin Timberlake videos.