30+ Cool Short Funny Quotes that are Truly Amazing

Whenever your life gives you bad lemon’s, we always need somebody to talk and care about us. sometimes, beautiful short funny quotes can help up loosen up your mind a little bit. Here we have collected some of the selected short funny quotes and sayings with images. which can help you be happier and help you feel better.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car. 😀

We have try to be more selective and choose the best funny quotes we can get hands on. be inspired and share with your friends and family members in social media and other sources. so keep reading and Enjoy !

Cool Short Funny Quotes that are Truly Amazing

You can’t live your life for other people. You’ve got to do what’s right for you, even if it hurts some people you love.

My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I was supposed to do.

Anything you lose automatically doubles in value.

I love asking kids what they want to be when they grow up because I’m still looking for ideas.

If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.

When the past comes knocking, don’t answer. It has nothing new to tell you.

Life is too short to worry about what others say or think about you. So have fun, enjoy and give them something to talk about.

That awkward moment when you’ve already said ‘what?’ 3 times and still have no idea what the other person said, so you just agree!

Going to McDonald’s for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug.

I hope we’re friends until we die. Then I hope we stat ghost friends and walk through walls and scare the shit out of people.

Married life is so easy – just like a walk in park.. but the problem is park is like Jurassic park.

We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don’t know.

Life goes on… Whether you choose to move on and take a chance in the unknown. or stay behind locked in the past thinking of what could’ve been.

When you fall, I will be there to catch you – With love, the floor.

Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face!

The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

If I die in my sleep, at least I can actually say that I died doing what I loved.

Follow your brain. Your heart is stupid as shit.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity

All my life I thought air was free, until I bought a bag of chips.

They laugh at me because I’m different; I laugh at them because they’re all the same.

Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else’s path unless you are in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. By all means, you should follow that.

My wife left me for a Hindu guy. At least he’ll treat her better… they worship cows.

Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done.

Girls Fall in love with what they hear, and guys fall in love with what they see. That’s why girls wear make up and guys lie!

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Children are smarter than us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children.

Who says nothing is impossible? I’ve been doing nothing for years.

Some day when scientists discover the center of the universe, many people are going to be disappointed to find out it isn’t them.

The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead.

Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want.

Short Funny Quotes images

Hopefully reading these quotes allowed you to create some positive perspectives about life. Remember, funny quotes aren’t about remembering them word for word and then repeating them for all to hear. just enjoy and share with your cutest friends. 🙂