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Caroline No

As you can tell from our tireless coverage of it here at thelmagazine.com, we’ve been closely following Caroline Kennedy’s bid for a senatorial appointment. (Couldn’t she just get appointed Ambassador to some insignificant stable temperate country with good food, like Portugal*, the way most well-connected rich people do?) Here comes the Times, with a pretty interesting minute-by-minute account of her decision, last night, to withdraw from consideration. The Times report is, however, as of right now pretty vague on why she dropped out, beyond problems that “surfaced during the vetting” process. Something to do with “taxes and a household employee”. You know, like Tim Geithner, who had to withdraw from consideration for Treasury Secretary for exactly the same reasons. Which begs the question: did the Times just make up the illegal Mexican housekeeper and tax dodges because they figure that’s generally a fair bet, for rich people? Probably.
* Wow, what a good job U.S. Ambassador to Portugal must be. Iberian beauty, old-world culture, easy rail access to all of Europe, you get invited to all the good parties because you’re the U.S. Ambassador, but you never have to do anything, because what the fuck happens in Portugal? (The current U.S. Ambassador to Portugal is Thomas F. Stephenson, a venture capitalist, active Harvard alum and Republican doner, who really looks like some random white-haired square-jawed pinstriped suit-wearing American dude.) Caroline, think about it.**