Welcome to my blog created on Mother's Day 2010, after receiving a Stage3 breast cancer diagnosis. I posted daily for one year through "cancer camp." If you are a new member of the Sisterhood of Cancerous Breasts, I bow to you Sister, you may want to read from the beginning. If you are already a Follower, thank you Dear Reader, for your sweet company. Come in, make yourself comfy, and I will tell you a story. with love and faith, Writergirldreams

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

You There? Can You Hear Me Now?

Hi. You're awful quiet out there. Very very quiet. You ok?

See that's the thing about this damn cancer thing, you get so damn pre-occupied with all your stuff, nobody wants to tell you their stuff anymore cause they think its not important compared with what I am going through. That is just wrong.

Now that I am feeling this fog lift, I am going to get out more so I can hear all about your problems. :)

It's difficult not to isolate yourself during something like this. You know what though? I think a lot of us are isolated. We just don't connect with people in the same ways we used to. I have resisted getting on Facebook. I don't know, it just seems so drive-by to me. It seems like people just become more and more voyeuristic and convince themselves they are connecting with other people. Do I sound like a Facebook snob?

I think these social networks are the modern version of The Enquirer, but you know everybody.

I like the one on one. I like talking to you over a meal, or sitting on your couch or at your kitchen table. I like looking at your face when you are telling me about your stuff. I like a cork coming out of a bottle as the punctuation to your sentence. I like listening to you talk while you are stirring a martini. tinktinktink the stirrer against the glass. Oh how I miss that.

I think we have all gotten too isolated from each other and have lost the great pleasure of a good conversation or no conversation at all, just being quiet with someone, just being present.

I miss that. I really do.

So let's all do something about it. Tomorrow make a date with a friend you haven't seen in awhile. Take a walk or go to breakfast or meet for coffee. Connect with somebody. Live.

Here's your other homework. Write a letter. A handwritten letter. There is still nothing like it, getting a handwritten letter in the mail. By the way, thank you Donna for the card and your thoughts in my mail box. It was a great little card, listen to this, about angels.

I believe in angels--that they're always near, whispering encouragement, whenever clouds appear, protecting us from danger and showing us the way, performing little miracles within our lives each day... Yes, I believe in angels, and I'm sure that you do, too, and I'm convinced that angels are watching over you.

You people are my angels. Nothing like a card like that to remind you, and when someone writes you something, all in their cursive and puts stickers inside too. Me likey stickers. Thank you Donna, and my other angels who have sent cards to me.

Don't you just love people's handwriting? I do. So send a letter tomorrow, ok? Or get a card and actually write a note in it, and then put it in the mail. No it doesn't count to send a birthday card and just sign your name, love so and so. I am talking a real honest to goodness letter.

Oh how delicious. How delicious. A letter in the mail. You grab the stack, bills and crap and junk mail, and there it is, mixed in, a letter, a real letter!

You open it salivating, you unfold real paper, and there it is, someone's handwriting.

Oh how delicious.

Just do it. Will you call somebody and make a date to have a real conversation in person, no phones, no TV, no nothin, just you sitting and listening and talking and laughing and crying if you need to. and write a damn letter, will you? A real letter.

7 comments:

Anonymous
said...

Glad you're feeling better...so happy that the nausea is gone! Okay, so I can't actually set a date with you in person because of the distance, but how about a phone date you and I when you're feeling well? I can make martini stirring sounds over the phone and we can pretend :) Love you.

I did actually have a lunch date last week with someone I went to school with, many years ago. He was one of my best friends in high scool. It had been probably 5 or so years since I had seen him. We connected on facebook. See facebook is good for somethings. We had a good lunch, and left the restaurant probably 2 hours later. Then walked up 1st street and back down to the bottom. We had a great visit and are looking forward to lunch again soon. And no, nothing going on with us, he is married. I've missed reading your blog the last few nights. Had to catch up tonight. Been busy sending emails out and getting ready for the Relay For Life. In fact we, a friend from Relay that reads your blog, sent your site to the Vallejo Times Herald. They do a lot for us with Relay and were looking for something different to put in the special section they do for us. Hope it was ok. You might be hearing from them.

Dear Kissin' Cousin,So, I have been thinking of you, and I have to tell you why. Kevin and I were in Yosemite yesterday. I forgot how beautiful and magnificent it was! Remember when Dad drove us in the VW Bug, and there were like 9 of us in that car when we were lil' tykes? Donny and Mikey were way in the back. I got to thinking and realized that the cousins need to meet up again, all 6 of us! How about it? Just a thought. We could meet in Yosemite. You pick the date. Maybe, next summer?Love, The Bandit

Yes TiTi, I remember that fateful trip. Your Dad rolled my fingers up in his car window and I was just too polite to say so until he figured out why the window wasn't rolling up! Yes, that Yosemite trip sounds great. A cousins reunion, long overdue! If we cant do Yosemite, we could all meet in San Diego and have a big BBQ on the beach. I think its a splendid idea. Count me in. Hugs girl.

I loved when you said cousins reunion. I am actually going to a cousins reunion on Saturday. They are my moms cousins, my second cousins, and we try to get together every summer. It is always a good time.

ACS Relay for Life, Vallejo

When problems are seen as opportunities, adversity seen as a good education, and the belief that every single thing that happens in your life is connected to a larger unfolding good, no more problems, just transformation, embracing this fragile glorious imperfect life where every step, even the wrong step, is on the path and leads to growth and grace. So chill baby. You got this. writergirldreams