Case Number 14531

EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS: THE THIRD SEASON

The Charge

Narrated and inspired by Chris Rock.

Opening Statement

Chris Rock (Dogma) pitched Everybody Hates Chris as a
recreation of his unhappy childhood as the only black student in an all-white
school in New York City. It was an original and intelligent premise full of
immense potential. Coupled with a cast of gifted comic actors and talented
writers, it seemed that the show would be a classic. So why is it that in barely
its third season it already seems creatively exhausted?

Facts of the Case

Here are the 22 episodes included in this set:

Disc One "Everybody Hates the Guidance Counselor" After taking an aptitude test, Chris (Tyler James Williams, Unaccompanied
Minors) is sent to visit a guidance counselor (Chris Rock) who threatens to
put him in remedial classes.

"Everybody Hates Caruso" After a student beats school bully
Caruso (Travis T. Flory), the rest of the school fights it out over who will be
the new bully.

"Everybody Hates Driving" Chris's dad Julius (Terry Crews,
Get Smart) authorizes Chris to drive his car around the block, but Chris
ends up driving it all the way to school.

"Everybody Hates Blackie" After the family is robbed, they
acquire a new guard dog, Blackie, who winds up being far more trouble than he's
worth.

"Everybody Hates the Bachelor Pad" When several family
members get sick, Chris is sent upstairs to live with single undertaker Mr. Omar
(Ernest Thomas, What's Happening!!), who leaves Chris alone with his
apartment all to himself.

"Everybody Hates Bed-Stuy" Chris's attempt to write an
interesting story for the school newspaper leads to a panic in his neighborhood
over a supposed serial killer.

Disc Two "Everybody Hates Houseguests" Chris's
best friend Greg (Vincent Martella) stays over for a few days, leading to
tensions.

"Everybody Hates Minimum Wage" Chris quits his after-school
job with neighborhood grocer Doc (Antonio Fargas, Starksy & Hutch) to
work at a Chinese restaurant for more money, but quickly regrets his
decision.

"Everybody Hates the New Kid" Corleone Junior High finally
gets another black student, but he turns out to not be what he appears to
be.

"Everybody Hates Kwanzaa" In order to do a good deed for
Christmas, Chris resolves to reunite neighborhood bum Kill Moves (Jeris
Poindexter) with his mother (Phylicia Rashad, The Cosby Show). Meanwhile,
Julius decides to save some money by celebrating Kwanzaa, which is cheaper than
Christmas.

"Everybody Hates the Port Authority" The family attempts to
take a bus trip down south, but is thwarted when Chris loses all his money
playing three-card Monte at the bus station.

"Everybody Hates Bad Boys" Chris decides that the only way
to earn the affections of his crush Tasha (Paige Hurd) is by acting like her
favorite bad boy rapper, Slaver Slav.

Disc Three "Everybody Hates the First Kiss"
Chris wheedles his way into a spin-the-bottle party in order to get closer to
Tasha.

"Everybody Hates Easter" Chris's mom Rochelle (Tichina
Arnold, Martin) embarks on a heated competition to wear the biggest and
fanciest hat in church on Easter Sunday.

"Everybody Hates the BFD" Mr. Omar launches a new program,
the Black Funeral Directors Scholarship, which Chris views as an opportunity to
score money for an upcoming Run-DMC concert.

"Everybody Hates Ex-Cons" Neighborhood criminal Malvo (Ricky
Harris) is released from prison after robbing Chris, and attempts to convince
everyone that he is trying to turn his life around.

Disc Four "Everybody Hates Earth Day" For his
school's Earth Day project, Chris is assigned to recycle cans around his
neighborhood, but learns that that will be harder than he thought.

"Everybody Hates Being Cool" Chris attempts to hang out with
the rough kids at Corleone, but quickly realizes that he's in over his head.

"Everybody Hates the 9th Grade Dance" Chris is actually able
to get a date for the 9th grade dance, but sets off a controversy because of his
race.

"Everybody Hates Mother's Day" Chris attempts to get
Rochelle the expensive perfume she wants for Mother's Day, but ends up being
arrested for shoplifting.

"Everybody Hates Graduation" Chris and Greg finally graduate
from Corleone Junior High, but realize that they may end up attending different
high schools.

The Evidence

It's painful watching a once great series descend into mediocrity. When
Everybody Hates Chris first premiered in the fall of 2005, it was a
welcome breath of fresh air. It was the family sitcom for people who hated
family sitcoms, a show that was touching, smart, and laugh-out-loud funny
without stooping to the sanctimoniousness or sappiness of other family shows
like Growing Pains or Home Improvement. The characters were
defined with quirks that were amusing but recognizable, the situations rang true
even when they were touched with absurdity, and the jokes were clever, going in
directions that weren't easy to predict.

That was in Chris's first season. In its second, the show spiraled
downward into awfulness so fast it was shocking. The characters went from being
well-defined into one-dimensional cartoons. The situations became sillier and
more outlandish. The show relied too much on pointless fantasy sequences, and
the jokes were either crude or timid. Worst of all, the show became formulaic.
Chris always lost, so the show became increasingly uncomfortable to watch
as this poor kid (who bore less and less resemblance to the actual Chris Rock)
was repeatedly beaten on by life.

This third season isn't as abysmal as the second, apart from a few episodes.
There are even one or two episodes that are actually solid (if not up to the
standards of the first season). Unfortunately, if there was one word that can
best describe this season, it would be "forgettable." Indeed, even
after watching many of the episodes here, you would be hard-pressed to recall
much of what happened. There are only a few memorable scenes and jokes, and
nothing that happens in one episode seems to have much impact on others.

The season premiere, "Guidance Counselor," epitomizes many of the
show's flaws. Rock's guidance counselor character is poorly defined. Is he
supposed to be smarter than he seems, or hopelessly incompetent? Some of his
jokes point to the former, others the latter. The episode also contains a
terrible B-plot where Greg wears a diaper to school so that he can emulate
astronauts. It's even less funny than it sounds. That's not to mention the
episode's resolution, which is so thin it doesn't even exist.

None of the other episodes this season are quite as awful (in characteristic
fashion, the worst episode is the first one) but few are all that great, for
similar reasons. The writing is inconsistent, many of the jokes are silly
instead of funny, and the show appears to have run out of ideas. Many of these
episodes rehash bits from earlier episodes, only not as well. Julius is still
cheap, Rochelle is still a lioness, Caruso still beats Chris and Greg up without
provocation, and Chris still ends each episode worse off than when he began. If
that sounds overly critical, keep in mind that The Simpsons was able to
squeeze many more seasons of classic episodes out of characters that were not
much more defined that the ones here. Only a few episodes ("Ex-Con,"
"Easter," and "New Kid") show the spark of old, and these
are still only partly as funny as the show was at its peak. Mostly, this third
season will serve as an agreeable time filler, but for a show with such talent
in front of and behind the cameras, it should really be much, much better.

The extras are a mixed bag. Each episode comes with a "Webisode"
(originally available on the show's official site), between two and three
minutes long, in which the episode's director discusses the making of each. Some
are useful, but others are fairly redundant once you've actually seen the
episode. There are also deleted scenes for a few episodes, and some are better
than others. Disc four also has "Off the Cuff: Cast Interviews"
(20:09), in which cast members describe each other and how they approach their
characters. The cast are easily the best part of the show, so this is a welcome
feature. "Chris Rock: Voiceover Session Unplugged" (9:13) shows Rock
recording his voiceovers and how those are written and edited. It's fairly
interesting. "Location, Location, Location" (4:28) is a featurette in
which the show's production manager describes how he builds and dresses sets
depending on the needs of each episode. "More Ms. Morello-isms" (2:15)
is a montage of jokes from Ms. Morello (Jacqueline Mazzarella), Chris's
hilariously patronizing teacher. Finally, the set is rounded out by the
"Slaver Slav Music Video" (1:19) (from the "Bad Boys"
episode) and an amusing "Gag Reel" (5:44). The 16:9 anamorphic
transfer and Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround mixes are top-notch.

The Rebuttal Witnesses

Pity poor Tichina Arnold and Terry Crews. Gifted comic actors, they make
lemonade out of the lemons they keep getting from the writing staff. Arnold is
great at physical comedy, and shines especially in some fantasy sequences
(including one hilarious scene where she dreams of being Cameo frontman Larry
Blackmon, right down to his big red codpiece). As for Crews, he has the best
deadpan in the business and can blend sternness and wit with ease. The kids
aren't always as consistent, but Martella and Williams show believable chemistry
as best (if not only) friends. If the quality of the writing matched that of the
acting, this show would be one of the best on TV.

Closing Statement

Watching the first season of Everybody Hates Chris was as exhilarating
as watching The Simpsons in its prime. Watching this season is like
watching The Simpsons in one of its later, less noteworthy seasons. It
goes from agreeable to mediocre, but is rarely memorable. Unless you're
collecting all the season sets, skip this one and stick with the first.