Dear Hogwarts

January 12, 2016

By Anonymous, Pittsburgh, PA

Image Credit: Kena A., Huntsville, AL

Dear Albus Dumbledore,

I am writing to inquire about the absence of my acceptance letter to the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I know not every owl can be 100 percent dependable, but what I don’t understand is how many owls it could possibly take until my letter arrives. I’m not asking to compete in the Triwizard Tournament or anything too extravagant, but I would like to know when I can catch the next train leaving King’s Cross station. I realize that seats on the train are limited, and so I would like to point out that I’m not particular and that I wouldn’t mind arriving at school by flying car.

I do also think that the lack of letters in my mail could be because both of my parents are muggles. However, don’t let that fool you. I know for a fact that I contain potential to be an excellent witch. For example, one time in the fifth grade I sneezed and my dog levitated! Now, it is up to interpretation whether the dog simply jumped out of fear, but my analysis is that the dog did in fact levitate. I believe that this was just the start of my magical talent, and through learning at Hogwarts I hope to expand my skills.

I’m looking forward to hearing from you and finally receiving my acceptance letter with your response.

Sincerely,

A Future Hogwarts Graduate

P.S. No rush on your response, but I was hoping to arrive in time for Quidditch tryouts.

THAT. WAS. AWESOME! Very well written and so relatable! You have no idea how many such letters I have written, only to find that I have no address to send them too. However, (please keep in mind that I almost hate myself for even mentioning this because your letter is so absolutely amazing! please almost completely ignore these corrections,) Dumbledore is dead, no matter how many times you've read the book again thinking that maybe it was just a nightmare and the whole thing is over. I love that... (more »)

when i was 11 my parents gave me a hogwarts letter for by birthday as a joke. I knew it was just a prank, but i still had hope that my letter would arrive. totally relateable. my hogwarts letter could still come! It's not too late!

Definitely. I wonder who has been opening my letters, then. Obviously, they knew Harry wasn't replying to Hogwarts and sent Hagrid off after him, so who replied to my letters? This must be some sort of muggle government conspiracy to weaken the magical community by cutting off the muggleborns, or something.