This
is solely a work of fiction. Any semblance to any real live person is
purely incidental and coincidental, and is a figment of the authors’
imagination.

“Adam,
wake up, breakfast is ready... hurry up... they'll eat it all.”
A young voice softly, yet insistently, whispered into my ear, and
then I felt a small pair of lips touch my cheek and ear like little
rose petals... it tickled, so I reached up my hand to push it away...

I
was so comfortable...

Lying
in my own bed... on my tummy...

The
top of my head buried under pillows...

Feeling
a draft across my back and points south...

Feeling
no covers...

Realizing
I was buck naked...

On
full display... to anyone with a half-decent set of eyes...

Prong.
Definitely distended. Sandwiched between me and the bed...

Urge
to pee...

Overwhelming
– almost, but not quite...

I
popped one eyelid open...

Closed
my eyes again, reached up my arm and rested it on the pillow, hoping
the intrusion would 'go away'...

Ah,
but, the intruder became even more insistent, whining, “Wake up
Amigo... I'm hungry.”

At
the same time, a hand, his hand, none other than Jesus’ fingers
began a trail down my spine beginning at the base of my neck, until
he touched my tail bone where he lingered for just a moment, before
smartly smacking my bare upturned cheek to further get my attention.
Meanwhile, goose bumps traveled up, or down, my spine... I don’t
know which way those little fleshy creatures travel… I wasn’t
aware of any hairs in or around my donut hole… but he found
one and yanked it hard – surely pulling it from its moorings.
Actually, it tickled rather than hurt… I reached around and
tried to knock away that intrusive feller, but all I smacked was air.

He
found that quite funny.

I
didn't.

The
flurry of activity was waking me up more than I cared for, yet, at
the same time, I giggled into the pillow, trying to muffle it the
best I could.

“WAKE
UP!” He said. The next thing he did was to kiss my right
upturned cheek... then it was quiet – until the tinkle tinkle
of water hitting the water in the toilet bowl was heard… that
gave me the opportunity to bury my head deeper beneath the pillows…
and I pulled the sheet up and over my naked legs, hips and back…
forget the rest… I had to hurry, the toilet flushed and the
water spigot turned on, meaning he was about finished with his
morning rituals.

No
more than 3 seconds later, I felt an arm touch my shoulder, breath on
the back of my neck. A little heartening voice said, “Wake
up... I'm hungry... come with me, Adam.”

The
guys did that same thing back at the group home. My solution then
was to scare the fuck out of them by screaming in their face... along
the lines of “I'm awake” or “get the fuck away”.
Sometimes, those words meant war, sometimes not. Most of the time
they left me alone... at least until they found out what I'd done the
night before to keep the adults out of my pants... and then it was
torture... their words and actions had hurt... but they just didn't
understand...

Anyway,
I didn't want to hurt Jesus... I just wanted him to 'go away'... just
as I felt his lips on my cheek, once again, I raised up, turned
toward him, and then growled, “Leave me alone. Go away!”
And then I plopped my head back down and buried it between the 2
pillows.

I
heard a sharp intake of breath. His arm left my back.. then there
was nothing … until the door to my bedroom slammed shut.

Startled,
I rolled over, looked toward the door... I didn't know what I was
expecting to see... but the feeling that I'd really fucked up
overshadowed the playful mood I'd kinda sorta been in...

I
didn't mean... to be mean.

Concerned,
I worked my way out of bed, scooted into the bathroom, hoisted myself
up and onto the throne, did my business, took a quick shower, rubbed
off a quick one with soap and water, snagged a pair of white gym
shorts, and then pulled them up and over the necessities of life.

After
doing my hair, I exited my room via the hallway that led into the
main part of the house. David and Peter were walking toward my
room. David had a perplexed look on his face. Peter's expression
had a tinge of irritation on it. David said, “Morning Adam.
Do you know what's wrong with Jesus? He took out of here like a bat
out of hell...”

“Uhm,
I kind of know what's going on... yeah, I scared him... he was trying
to wake me up... and well, I went overboard... do you know where he
went?”

“Did
he sleep with you?” David asked, curiously.

“Yeah.
He was scared last night.”

“Do
you know what he was afraid of?” David asked, genuinely
concerned. His concern rubbed off on me...

“He
was afraid of having a nightmare. He said he has them sometimes.”
I replied, not really wanting to go into the whole thing of Jesus
and me getting intimate and everything... I hadn't yet figured that
one out, myself.

“Did
he have one?”

“No,
not that I'm aware of. He didn't wake me up during the night. I
told him he could... sometimes I have them, too.”

David
nodded, as did Peter. Peter put his arm around David's waist. Peter
said, “We were just wondering about him because his bed was
unmade... anyway, we're glad you were there for him.”

With
that, they took off down the hall toward the staircase leading down
into the living area.

I
thought to myself just how I was not there for Jesus... what if he'd
been scared? What if he just needed me? What if he wanted to...

Seriously,
I was just playing with him... but... I did want to sleep some
more... I fucked up... I knew I would... I always did...

Peter
returned, and said, “He's not downstairs... maybe he just went
for a walk. Antoine went with Dad into town. They won't be back
until later... they had several appointments …

Even
though I knew it was a rhetorical question, I asked anyway, “Should
we go looking for him?”

“No,
not right now. He may have just went home. Or, maybe he went to the
beach. He likes to be alone sometimes... If we don't hear from him
then we'll go check his house and the beach.”

Peter
added, “He's probably working out. He and Antoine usually do
their exercises before breakfast. Since Antoine's gone... he's
probably just doing them alone. I wouldn't worry about it. Come on,
let's go eat before it's all gone.”

By
10am, I was wondering where he might have been. AZ was nervous, too.
He took off to look for his brother. Maria left shortly afterward.
Jeremy and Jason took her home. They said they were going to spend
some time alone, that they would probably go to the main beach
afterward.

Allen
and Angel excused themselves from the dinner table, made their way
outside, and then disappeared from sight after saying they were going
to hang out at the beach in the tourist area.

Peggy
and Grandma urged me to join them out on the patio. No reason,
really. I had nothing better to do, and kind of wanted to hang with
them, anyway.

We
talked about this, that and a lot of things, none too serious, just
every day, normal conversation.

The
conversation turned tides when Grandma observed, “I'm glad
Jesus has someone to call a friend, Adam. He and Antoine are close,
very close, but they have more of a mentor/mentored relationship.”

Peggy
agreed, “He's really getting close to you, Adam. He watches
your every move. And when you sleep in late, he's chomping at the
bit to wake you up.”

I
looked to the pavement. I wanted to slink into the crack where the
two slabs of concrete met. All I said was, “Yeah... uhm, may I
be excused, please, ma'am, Grandma?”

“Honey,
don't be afraid. The boy is very lonely... he needs a friend... and
so do you.” Peggy said, softly.

“Yes
ma'am. I'll try. May I be excused, please?”

Grandma
nodded. Peggy took my hand, squeezed it twice, and then released it.
I leaned down, kissed both their cheeks, and then took off into the
house, went to my bedroom, used the restroom, put on a sock and shoe,
grabbed my crutches, and then left my room via the French doors,
walked my way down the stairs.

Something
didn't feel right... I couldn't put my finger on it... maybe it was a
foreboding coursing through my veins.

David
and Peter were lounging at the side of the pool, hanging their legs
over, holding hands with their arms intertwined... they both looked
up as I walked by. David asked, “Are you ready to go check on
Jesus?”

“Yeah,
I'm going... I know where he lives. Look, I sorta fucked things
up... I'd like to go alone, if it's okay with you?”

They
exchanged glances, and then David turned toward me and said, “He
adores the ground you walk on, Adam. Don't let him down... and don't
let yourself down. We were just talking... let yourself go, Adam...
just let it happen, whatever it is.”

I
nodded.

Peter
said, “Let us know if you need something... we're planning to
be here.”

“Okay,
thanks.” I said weakly, feeling vulnerable... for some reason.

Without
delay, I descended the stairs to the beach and took off south.

After
falling 4 times in the soft sand, I slowed down, but kept on moving,
going as fast as I dared.

When
I arrived at the Mission church, I found a bench under an arbor to
sit down on. I made my way there, sat to rest and look out over the
ocean. I found the perfectly clear view and the sounds of the ocean
to be very calming. I didn't know why I was so nervous and shit.
Maybe it was when Peggy and Grandma said I needed a friend... they
were all friends to me... I'd never had real friends before... and
their family seemed the closest I'd ever thought of a friend to be.
Or maybe I was just worried about Jesus. I got to thinking about
what he and I had done the night before... I didn't know what to
think about that... on one hand, our experience seemed to be the most
natural thing that had ever happened... I mean, one moment we were
goofing around, playing around, and in the very next minute we were
grinding lips and hips purposefully... yet, it wasn't purposeful...
because we, or at least I had no destination in mind. We didn't “do”
anything to make it happen... it just did... and I had the most
intense experience in all my life... normally, when I masturbate
myself, I did not go unconscious, or whatever it’s called...
but I did go totally unconscious.

Besides
that – I wasn't gay.

I
couldn't be.

I'd
jerked off to girls' tits and pussies... even though I'd never before
seen a pussy, or, for that matter, tits. I'd often wondered what it
would feel like to have my dick inside... I'd heard stories from the
older boys at the group home say that it was all slick, and that the
pussy would grab hold of your cock and not let go until the girl
threw you off because her slit and clit got too sensitive... one of
the boys, Damien, said that he'd continue to fuck... he liked the
girls to fight him off... he'd keep on going until they were begging
for yet another release... and so it went. I didn't believe him,
really. I mean after I jacked off and experienced orgasm... I was
done because my dickhead got way too sensitive to continue being
rubbed. Was a girl any different?

Then
a vision crowded in... what Jesus had told me of his older brother
fucking him... and his little brother being... being... being... and
how he and AZ had usually pleased their elder… sent my mind to
that place where I remembered Jesus sitting in a chair, unaware that
all his goods, including his hole, were in plain sight... I wondered
how in the hell he ever accommodated something as big as what I'd
been told about his brother... Pablo... there, that's his name, I had
forgotten.

A
violent chill traveled up and down my spine, goose-bumps sprouted
from the pores on my arms, and then as quick as a passing thought, I
felt my butthole tightly clench tightly shut, and the sense of
foreboding became intense.

Jesus
had spoken, many times about the priest who lived in the Mission...
maybe he was talking to the man... I got off the bench, walked around
to the driveway side of the house... there was no car in the area.

Curiously,
I walked to the church, opened the door and peered inside. The
place, for being a church, was pretty kewl... it was an older
building, built with stone. From history lessons I figured it had
been built at around the turn of the twentieth century, maybe a
little later, somewhere in that era.

There
was nobody around, so I stole inside, walked down the aisle toward a
candle stand with many lit up... I wondered why they were burning
candles when nobody was around... I thought that was dangerous so I
blew them all out.

I
wondered why churches had so many expensive things in them... I mean,
who or what were they protecting? This God they talked about was
everywhere... so why did they have it locked up in a cabinet... I
laughed out loud. The sound of my laugh reverberated throughout the
building, even though I didn't laugh 'all' that hard. A chill ran up
and down my spine, and then it spread into my hands.

At
the same time, I realized the crutches were putting a lot of pressure
in my armpits. I walked up the two steps to get to some chairs
sitting in the middle of the rotunda like thing where a stone altar
sat. It wasn't shiny marble like I'd seen in other churches...
instead, it was rustic appearing. I'd seen altars like it in old
history books... like way back in the 1850's. It seemed out of
place... what I mean is that it did not appear to be any part of
Hawaiian culture... but I'd not done too much reading about the
culture... I hadn't had or made the time to do so. I consigned the
task to read to memory.

Feeling
rested, I got up, turned around, walked the short distance to a gold
plated tabernacle like thing, reached up, opened the little door and
found a totally antiquated chalice like thing in the center of the
little 'room'... it was absolutely beautiful. Not a single tarnish
mark marred its surface. For some reason... my curiosity satisfied,
I closed the door, turned away and began walking toward the front
doors. On my way, just as I got to the bottom step, I felt a warm
breeze blow my hair, brush my face like a painter's brush would do,
and then I felt hands rest upon my shoulders. Quickly, I turned
around, but nobody was there... no, I wasn't frightened because those
hands weren't scary, rather they provided comfort, from what I didn't
know. There was no plausible explanation.

Then
the breeze was gone, and the hands left my shoulders, yet it was like
I was being pushed along as I slowly walked up the aisle toward the
front doors. Once there, I looked back toward that altar just to see
if what I'd seen and felt was... what? Reality?

Seeing
nothing out of the ordinary, I took off toward the beach, staying in
the shallow sand. I'll always marvel at the power of the mother
ocean. She is so fierce, yet she is kind and gentle when you treat
her right. You treat her right by keeping trash and whatnot out of
her waters, respecting her mightiness and majesty, and simply
enjoying what she offers so freely to anyone who simply pays
attention.

What
next caught my attention, after walking about 500 yards further south
down the beach was pairs of underwear and outer shorts, socks, and
tennis shoes. They were about 3 feet apart from one another. There
were footprints in the sand that headed into the ocean.

I
looked all around hoping to find who they belonged to. I saw nobody.
I looked at them again... I recalled that they belonged to Jesus...
he'd worn them the previous night, and shed them onto the floor as
he'd gotten into bed.

The
sense of foreboding from within became intense. With a sense of
urgency, I tucked the shorts into my underwear, tied together the
strings of the shoes, stuffed the socks inside, and then took off to
the rocks, thinking maybe was on down shore a ways.

Arriving
at the rocks, I sat the shoes down, reached in and pulled out the
shorts, and then laid them all together on a rock.

I
looked out into the ocean; half expecting to see him out playing...
perhaps even with the dolphins. But I saw nobody... and I looked
very carefully because this was the end of the line, nobody could go
further. The rocks were daunting. There was no way I was going to
go up that trail... it was sandy, pebbly, and had had several rock
slides.

I
turned my attentions back to the ocean. I was sure that was where
the answer was. It had to be. It just had to be.

I
sat on that same rock with Jesus' clothes, slid down my own shorts
and underwear, stacked them on top of Jesus', laid down my crutches,
and then scooted down the sand and into the water. It wasn't quite
as scary as it had been when we'd been in the ocean before... in
fact, I got out into the water, floated out for maybe 150 feet... I
could still sit down and have my head above water, so I did. My neck
was at the waters' edge. The waves were much, much less than they'd
been before, too.

I
don't know why, I was still nervous about the conflicts I was having
inside about Jesus... I didn't understand where it was coming from,
or exactly what was causing it. I was also feeling guilt... he had
to have been so upset for him to leave my room like that. I was just
messing with him... yet the sound of his intake of breath was clear,
and then the slam of my bedroom door.

Okay,
the conflict was there, up close and personal. I felt it in my
bones... then what was there to do about it... talk with him... share
my heart? Where was my heart? What was I feeling? Was I scared?
Was what we did – wrong?

Our
orgasm didn't feel wrong... quite the opposite was true. And, no, it
wasn't pure lust... I'd been lustful before... cured by only one or
two masturbation sessions, and then it was over... until the next
time. But, our experience was much, much different – pleasing,
warming, sensory overload, and a desire to do it again... but I was a
guy. I hated them touching me, yet... Jesus was different, oh so
different... in a very good way. I closed my eyes to the bright
sunshine, took myself back to my bed, felt my lips on his,
experienced his hardness against my own tumult state, and then I laid
back into the water, and just as my nose went under my body reacted
violently as shards of pleasure emanated from the center point of my
body... without even touching 'it'. I'd never before experienced
anything like that, and experiencing it I was, oh my God... would it
ever end? I'd hoped not... but the need for oxygen replenishment
became overpowering, so I gathered up all remaining strength and sat
back up, gulping in life sustaining air.

Recovered,
I still felt uneasiness... like someone was watching me... like
they'd watched my private moment... or something... I couldn't tell
what the feeling was, or where it was coming from, exactly.

I
made my way to shore, scooted up to the rock where the clothes were
lying, hoisted myself off, pushed the fabrics aside, sat down, turned
around looked up into the mountain. The rocks, themselves, looked
daunting. There's no way a human could climb up those bare facing
creatures of nature, volcanoes, and earthly uprisings. I then looked
out in the ocean, straining my eyes to see who or what might have
been out there... I saw nothing. I needed to pee, so I stood back up
using the rock as leverage, and took care of business in front of God
and anybody else who may have been looking down the beach with
binoculars... sheesh, talk about paranoid.

The
breeze felt good, really good. I hardened up again. My male gland
stuck out straight out like a flag pole fastened securely on the side
of a building. After shaking it an extra time or two, I put it back
inside where it belonged. I sat back down, leaned back and simply
rested and enjoyed the sights and sounds all around me. I can't tell
you how long I sat there drinking it all in. Time meant nothing,
really. Antoine had taught me how to gauge time, though. When I got
my bearings back, I looked up into the sky and could tell it was
pretty close to noon. The sun was shining brightly. The breeze was
light, and appeared to be from the south, but my guess was skewed by
the rocks all around behind me. The wind could have been coming from
any direction, actually, but it felt like it was coming from the
south.

Feeling
a big ole pocket of air well up inside my stomach, I leaned forward
and to the side, allowing a butt flapping fart to escape. I don't
know why – I giggled. Sheesh, how juvenile can you be? Not to
forget – I was glad the breeze was blowing.

The
moment of levity was utterly fractured when I heard the sound of a
rock falling... Quickly, I looked up, immediately behind me... and
saw nothing there, however, something moved above which caught my
eye.

My
heart stopped.

I
took in a deep breath, and held it in.

I
didn't move. I couldn't move. Time stopped.

I
swallowed hard.

I
found the boy. Or did he find me?

Way
high up, perched on a lone rock, one that actually looked like a
chimney arising from the floor, was Jesus. His legs were dangling
over the side... I wondered how in the fuck he could ever possibly
get where he was... the closest outcropping of rock that far up had
to have been 6 feet away from his legs. He couldn't have dropped
down, like Spider Man could have done. Maybe he climbed up there?
But how?

I
surveyed the situation – where he was to where I was. There
was no way I could get up there... not by using crutches.

He
had his face in his hands. The wind was blowing significantly up
there... his hair was being tousled by mother nature herself. I
asked her to take care of him, and then I screamed his name several
times, trying to get his attention – all to no avail.

I
sat back down, tossed the crutches close by, and then found a
possible way that I could get up there, at least close enough so that
he could hear me. Knowing that I WAS somehow going up there - I put
on both underwear and shorts, dropped to the gravel, and inched my
way to the path leading up, up, up.

Handhold
by handhold, knee over leg, twist this way, turn that way, I scraped
my way a foot at a time up the steep incline until I could go no
further without a short rest period. I looked up hoping to see him,
however a large rock blocked my view. I looked down to see check my
progress – okay, well I was making progress, but not as much as
I would liked to have made.

Filled
with determination and a sense of urgency... and yes, another wash of
foreboding, I took off and made progress an inch at a time, sometimes
more, until he came back into view. We were nearly horizontal in a
straight line. He didn't look my way, instead his head was held down
nearly to the point of almost resting on his chest.

If
a bird flew, we were only about 20 feet apart, yet the distance
between us might have well been half-way across the world because
there was no way to close the separation.

I
knew I was on a narrow ledge, and I had an idea that there was
nothing to my left... my arm was hanging free. Turning back to him,
he had lowered himself to a crouching position on his haunches,
contemplating his next move, then stood back up, raised his arms up
and out, bent over, looked down, and then he looked in my direction.

Our
eyes met. It was then that I saw what appeared to be tears running
down his cheeks. Quickly he turned away, took a sprinters' stance,
raised up his head, and then...

The
position he was in, the intensity in his eyes, the what was it?
Determination? Hopelessness? Futility?

He
then crouched down on his haunches, looked over the ledge, smiled,
and then stood back up... the way he was standing, the way he was
leaning... I had to turn away... I looked over the edge on my left
side... and found myself on a sheer cliff looking down and seeing
nothing but rock below... jagged rocks.

Feeling
a terror I'd never before experienced, I quickly vomited over the
edge into the chasm below. Once the upheaval passed, at least for a
few seconds, weak from the effort of doing that and from the slow
painful, inch by inch trek up the mountain, I laid my head down into
the sandy dust, wept bitterly, sobbed harder than I'd ever sobbed
before in my life, ever, thinking only of my one true friend, and how
he... how he... no, please no, I screamed into the grit with total
despair, rage and terror coming from places I did not know existed.

I
chanced one more look toward where he'd been. He was gone.

Then
determination took over. If I couldn't have saved him, then I had to
get to his body. Hopefully he hadn't yet died... so that he didn't
have to leave this world – alone... without someone telling him
that they loved him just as he was... without someone expressing
their love to him...

I
broke down in racking sobs, again. That time they came from total
emptiness, helpless and hopelessness. I was such a fucking goddamned
pussy, a fucking weakling, a fucking worthless piece of owl shit, not
worthy of living... I thought of his angelic face, with the
occasional (frequent) orneriness filling his eyes... the memories of
how he'd tried over and over again to wake me up, the soft petal
kisses he'd bestowed on my face, neck and back, how his hand had
traveled my spine first up then down...

There
was only one way to see and feel him again.

Without
a second thought, I worked my body around so that I was totally
looking down into that wide expanse of 'nothing'.

I'd
always wanted to be free like a bird... you know... flying in mid air
without a concern in the world.

The
experience was indeed freeing and liberating. I was released, at
last.

But
then cold hard reality struck, and it struck like a mighty
locomotive. Reality was intimately upfront and personal as my body
twisted and turned, trying to right itself from totally unnatural
positions, sinister positions, evil positions, all encompassing
positions... and then it stopped. I stopped.

The
screams were surreal. Were they coming from me? I didn't think
so... as I was too busy trying to catch my breath... shards of pain
began tearing me apart, from the top of my head to the tips of my
toes... and everything between points.

The
screams were coming closer and closer and closer. And then I heard
that same voice screaming in a language I didn't understand... but it
was coming even closer and closer yet.

I
chanced taking enough strength to open my eyes. All I saw was the
face of a boulder 10 times my size. I was lying right up against it,
intimately. But... what was that up against my back? I then
realized I was being hugged by mother earth. God, she was strong.
God, I was weak.

And
then I felt hands touching me.

And
then I felt lips touching my cheeks... they were wet... they stung...
yet the more they touched me the less the sting...

The
voice of the boy... was ringing in my ears... he was screaming... he
was sobbing... yet I was fading into a sunset...

I
tried to move... I wanted to see the eyes of that boy that I realized
I loved... but my body would not respond. I felt nothing physical.
It was like I was in suspended animation. The pain was gone. All of
it was gone. All I felt was peace and tranquility.

And
then it happened.

I
separated from the earthly body that had carried me around on the
planet Earth for 15 years, 7 months and 16 days, 417 minutes and 44
seconds.

As
my spirit ascended, I looked down to see a boy, a naked boy, a boy
named Jesus holding that body I'd just shed away like a locust sheds
its skin on a hot summer evening.

All
sorts of hands started touching my Spirit. They weren't frightening.
They were rubbing and soothing my shed off pain, welcoming me into
The Tomorrow like I was an old friend from forever and ever and ever
and ever, Amen.

I
looked all around trying to see, but found I had no eyes to see with,
however, yet... the only thing around and within was light... a
calming experience of light, warm, inviting, soothing.

And
then... I felt a pair of arms envelope my entire being. They were
strong, yet they were gentle at the same time... comforting...
loving... supporting... yet I had nothing to support... I tried to
move my arms toward it... but I had no arms... I tried to sit up...
but I had no spine nor a butt to sit on, and no legs. I realized I
was a nothing... yet, I was something... wasn't I?

A
kindly elderly woman's said, “Rest child. You've nothing to be
afraid of... you're safe now. Nobody's going to hurt you because
there's nobody here to hurt you. There is nothing here but love. It
is freely given and is freely received. Our Welcoming Committee will
be along shortly. He's got some things to say to you about before
you can enter the Kingdom of Forever... you're a good boy filled with
life, vitality, courage and strength.”

Although
I could not see, I began a vision of 'seeing' an elderly, grandmother
type 'person' holding me in her arms, looking into my eyes (if I had
them to be looked into, that is). She leaned down, or up, or to the
left, or to the right – direction had no meaning because there
was no direction or any other point of reference.

If
I would have had lips, if I would have had sensation, if I would have
had vision... I would have seen and felt her lips touch mine in a
very meaningful manner, like she really cared, like she wanted only
the best for me, and to make me feel like someone, and to give me a
reason to love back – freely, without question or reservation.
The same voice, if she had a voice box at all... since there was no
sound emanating from anywhere or from anyone, said, “Child, you
need to see this... you need to make a decision... and yes, even
though there is nothing else, you need to be present on Earth...”

Those
same arms, the ones that didn't exist, lifted me up forward... if
there was such a thing as up and forward... seeing with a set of eyes
that I didn't have... I saw the boy Jesus lean down and kiss the lips
of the body I no longer had. He then crawled up the crevice, looked
all around, especially toward the north... on the distant horizon, I
saw 2 boys racing down the beach... one, a black boy, Antoine …
his face was clear, and beside him, running almost faster, was his
mate Matt... Behind them, maybe 30 paces away, was an oriental boy...
Benji... and alongside him was Andy, William and Harry... and then
racing in a huge truck was … I could see their faces clearly –
Jeremy and Jason. In the back of the truck were two boys, white
boys, Allen and Angel.

Because
of the distance involved, I knew that Jesus could not see, nor sense
them.

The
boy took one more look down into the crevice where lay my lifeless
human body, and then seeing no absolutely no movement from it, he
crawled up the canyon, and then using hyper human strength climbed up
the rock tower, the same one that looked like a chimney, the same one
that I thought he'd jumped from... when he got his legs up and over
the ledge, he stood, looked all around everywhere in his sphere of
vision. He then put his face into his hands... and then I felt his
pain... it was totally blinding... the soft woman's voice softly
said, “He's going to join you, Adam. He should be here in a
little while; although it will take him much longer to die... he
won't land correctly, in a way that will cause him immediate death.
He will live long, but he will be dead, too.”

“No,
that can't happen... I thought he... I thought he... I thought he was
dead... he'd already jumped. I just knew he had. Stop him... you've
got to stop him!” If I would have had voice... it would have
been screaming, and if I had lungs, the sound from my throat (if I
would have had had a throat) would have come from their depths for
the entire world to hear.

The
fear, the terror, the pain, the uncertainty, the screaming anger,
dissipated just enough so that my vision returned... I saw Jesus sit
on the rock, and then he firmly took his penis and began stroking it
meaningfully and purposefully... I was then given his feelings...
while his penis felt really, really good, and if I had had a penis
then mine would have been just as erect as his... but I didn't have
one... overshadowing the pleasurable sensations was an overwhelming
despair – I knew the feeling oh so well... I felt every bit of
it... and I also felt my body, his body, begin to tense up, as orgasm
was certainly just around the corner... but then a vision returned –
he laid down on the rock. His legs were hanging off the edge... he
scooted to the edge so that his butt was right on the sharp edge of
the rock... his, my orgasm was fast approaching... I could feel it,
so could he... while it was pleasurable... the other sensations deep
inside were mitigating the pleasure...

From
the corner, from the periphery of my eyesight, which I had none, I
saw Antoine and Matt quickly approaching... they were at the base of
the rocks... Antoine looked up... without hesitation, as if he were a
leopard or Cheetah or some similar creature, he bounded up the rocks
without difficulties. During his ascent, he looked down into the
crevice, saw my body, then he looked up to Jesus, saw what he was
doing, and for a moment I felt his fear and terror, and his knowing
what was about to happen, and the knowledge that he'd never make it
up there in time.

Just
then, a man, with widely stretched golden tipped wings appeared in a
vision... his voice, if he would have had a voice, said, “Adam,
you must stop being afraid. Our Father has given me permission to
send you back... if that's what you want to do... the choices are all
yours and yours alone.”

“Who
are you?” I asked.

“It
matters not, Adam. Not now. You must make a decision very quickly,
or else it will be too late. I must warn you that if that boy dies,
you will be separated from him, here, and forever. While your spirit
will be free, you will still yearn for that which you cannot have.
The question you must answer is: Do you love him?”

Without
hesitation, I said, “Yes. Yes, I do.”

“Then
tell him... he will hear your voice inside of his being.”

When
I entered his sphere, I felt pain, but I also nearly became
overwhelmed with his thoughts of – me – as he closed in
on the last few strokes before going over the edge... over the edge
into orgasmic death. It would be the last one he'd ever
experience... and he was determined and ready for it to happen.
Despite the overwhelming pain, uncertainty, terror and hopelessness,
I sent to him a trace of light, and willed myself to say, “I
love you, Jesus. I'm feeling the joy of your body, and I'm feeling
your pain... I know what it feels like... I'd thought you'd ended
your life by jumping off... I've been so damned confused... but I'm
not confused anymore. Right now, I'm dead... I don't know what's
going to happen... but I've been told that we'll never ever be
together if you die like I did... I did wrong.”

I
turned, but only if I would have had a body to turn, toward the man
wearing the robes and wings, the wings that were glowing
majestically, brilliantly, but not mythically. If I would have had a
head to nod with then I would have nodded...

Somehow,
the angel and I... made our way safely down the rock cliff. With his
help, I lifted my body from the deep crevice. The body was distorted
beyond recognition. The body's face was also smashed beyond any
recognition; its arms were bent in unnatural positions; as were its
thighs. The spine was fractured in 85 places... it held no
strength... the skull was splintered. A white, egg like material was
oozing from a gash across the forehead.

Unable
to keep myself from doing it... I looked up to the top of the chimney
rock... if I would have had a penis... if I would have had nerve
endings and a central nervous system to feel with... I would have
experienced the most powerful orgasm of my entire life right then and
there... I was afraid for Jesus... his free arm, and his legs were
flailing... in the sunlight, I saw several drips of fluid fly from
that which designates him as male. I heard his voice announce
arrival at that splendid moment.

Just
then a brilliant white light enveloped the entirety of the world.

Then
it quickly passed.

Somehow,
everything had changed.

I
had awareness... unlike anything I'd ever experienced.

I
had vision...

I
had hearing...

I
was no longer mystic or mystified...

I
had arms...

I
had legs – both of them... they were there... and they were
fully supporting all of my weight... how could that be?

The
angel... yes, he felt like an angel... yet I didn't know what an
angel felt like, did I? He then wrapped me into a cocoon of peace,
tranquility, peacefulness, and strength... so much so that when I saw
what happened to my leg and penis I was not shocked, appalled, and I
did not get sick to my stomach... at seeing my leg being sliced off
to the bone with a large box knife, nor did I experience pain at
seeing the bone separated by a hammer and chisel. The boy was very
little... no more than maybe 2 or 3 years of age, maybe younger, I
don't know. Vaguely, the face looked much like mine. Perhaps that's
what I looked like at that age... I don't know. There were no
pictures to see for any kind of comparison.

During
the process of taking away the bone, the chisel slipped. It traveled
upward, landing on and in my maleness, leaving but a bloody gaping
gash.

The
angel squeezed me tightly. When he did that, I felt strength and
stamina return like I'd never before had or experienced. Then he
unfolded his wings and said, “My Father has healed your
suppressed memories, Adam. I'm just along for the ride... as soon as
someone brings up your crutches, I'll be gone.

Being
once again aware, I looked down to the rocks where my feet had been
firmly planted. My left leg was absent, although my thigh was
fuller, unlike the gnarly and totally disfigured clump of flesh and
bone. My penis, although still disfigured looked like I'd never
before seen... instead of the jagged, scarred and ugly appearance, it
was largely smooth... and very erect, standing out proudly as if it
were a flag pole firmly moored to the face of a large tall building.

The
angel continued, “We'll always be looking out over you. You'll
live to the ripe old age of <giggles> … sorry, I can't
tell you that... and, Adam, as soon as you write this segment of
David's story... you will remember none of what has transpired. As
far as your brothers are concerned... none of this has happened... if
you will now look down the mountain...”

I
looked down with eyes that could see... the sound of the ocean
overtook my senses of hearing... and then the sounds and sights of my
brothers playing in the ocean, naked, was clearly heard and seen.

The
angel said, “Shall we go down the mountain? Someone wants to
see you.”

Using
the eyes I could again use to see with, I saw Jesus standing next to
the rock where I'd laid our clothes. He was looking them over
curiously, as if it was the first time he'd ever seen such a thing.
He then looked into the air, like he was seeing and talking to
someone very close to him.

He
then reached for the crutches, stood them up on the tips... and then
handed them to me.

How
did that happen? And when did I get down the mountain... I was
standing right in front of him. But how could I do that? I had no
leg... when I looked down to see how that could possibly happen –
all I saw was that I was standing upright as though I had both legs.

Jesus
was looking at me awestruck, and then his smile lit up his face. His
eyes were bright, clear and sparkling despite their deep chocolate
colored irises.

I
accepted the crutches.

The
angel then spoke his final words, “I love you, Your Father
loves you, and your new parents and your new brothers love you...
but... this boy bringing up your crutches loves you the most, in
human terms that is. Be well. Live life to its fullest. Love
freely. Let others love you, too. Be all that you can be. I'll
always be close by. You'll never be alone again. Your past will no
longer hold you hostage.”

I
said, “Thank you.”

Jesus,
with his eyes wide open, looked into mine with an intensity I'd never
before seen, replied, “You're welcome. Come on, let's play.”

*-*

“Adam,
are you okay?” Peggy asked. She was leaned over me. Her hand
was on my cheek. The look in her eyes was that of complete and total
love.

I
reached up, brushed my hand against her soft cheek, looked into her
eyes, and then, feeling a tremendous sense of peace, harmony, and
love, I lifted myself up from a reclining position and kissed her
lips.

We
then released. It was then, while lying back down, that I realized
two things: first, Jesus was lying right next to me, and secondly, my
shorts were wet … almost like I'd been swimming... yet it
didn't feel like water. With no need to look down to realize what
that wetness was or represented, I looked down anyway... my shorts
were indeed wet – in one particular location... the area over a
distention from that which designates me male. Jesus moved such that
he was lying on my back... his shorts, too, had the same appearance.

A
hot flash of embarrassment took hold of my body, heated me up surely
to a flash point that I'd never before experienced.

I
looked deeply into her eyes. In them I saw only love and concern...
She kissed my cheek, and said, “Adam, just be yourself. You're
loved. And you're certainly capable of loving, too. If you are true
to yourself then great things are in store for you.”

I
was no longer afraid. Something inside of me snapped right then and
there. I said, “I'll try. I feel different. I can't explain
how or why.”

“I
know, honey. Don't try to think about it too much... just live...
and simply be yourself.”

Without
thinking any contrary thoughts, I arose from my spot on the chaise
lounge, put my hand on her cheek, and then, again, without
reservations touched my lips to hers.

When
we parted, Jesus put his arms around my torso and squeezed gently and
firmly. I looked into his eyes. Seeing only love and caring and
dedication, I looked to Peggy, smiled, and then leaned down and
kissed Jesus' lips, quickly but meaningfully. I then looked back to
Peggy. In them I saw no trace of disgust or anything else that would
make me believe she was ashamed, nor did I feel shame.

“Why
don't you guys go swimming? The boys are all out there. They've
been waiting for you two to wake up.”

I
nodded, then for the first time, simply because it was the only
thought that passed through my mind, I said, “I love you.”

She
replied, with tears brimming from her eyes, “I know. And I
love you, too. Adam, your Dad and I would like to talk to you about
your legal position in our family this evening... although the
paper-work is just a formality; we still need to get it started... if
it's okay with you?”

“Yeah,
I'd like that. I'll try to be a good Son.” I said, with
confidence spreading through my being.

She
replied, “You already are. Don't worry so much, okay?”

I
nodded.

She
took off for the house. Jesus pulled me into him, kissed my lips
firmly and wantonly, grabbed my crutches, handed them over, and then
led me into the bathroom where we peed, standing side by side.

Finished
with that chore, without fanfare or delay, we removed our shorts and
underwear, stood there taking in the sights of our bodies for a few
seconds, like lovers would do, and then, feeling that we needed to be
with our adopted brothers, tossed them aside to the floor and went to
the pool.

Like
Peter did for David, Jesus led me to the waters' edge, took my
crutches, and then pushed me in.

I
landed between Benji and Andy. They reached out their arms and pulled
me to the surface. While I didn't really need their help, I accepted
anyway.

Just
then, we three were splashed like crazy. Within a second or two,
Jesus surfaced, put his arm around my waist and allowed his fingers
to settle into and between my butt cheeks... largely he was unaware.

Benji,
meanwhile, stood directly in front of me, looked deeply into my eyes,
and then he put his hand on each temple. He closed his eyes, and
then within seconds opened them and returned his gaze to me. He
smiled brightly, leaned in and kissed my left cheek. He removed his
hands, wrapped his arms around Andy, saying, “We were just
getting ready to play water soccer... wanna join us?”

“Sure,
kewl. Uhm, Benji... I'm ready to be healed. Would you please help
me?”

“I'm
ready to be healed... would you please help me?”

“No,
you've already been healed. I don't need to do anything. You're
going to be okay... in fact, you're already okay. Love and cherish
your Bonded One. The bond will never die.”

Just
then a ball, the soccer ball we played with, connected with my head.
We all looked in the direction it had come from. David, with an
wickedly evil expression on his face, snickered...

The
war was on.

And
quite unlike usual... Jesus, Andy, Benji and I prevailed in victory.
Basking in glory, we headed to the side of the pool. The losers
joined us. We talked about this, that and everything under the sun
that came to our minds. I don't know... it seemed like we'd known
each other all our lives. It felt good to be a part of the family.
Even though the words weren't said... we knew we all loved each other
in a very real and meaningful way.

We
were all hard, and for once I didn't feel self-conscious or
embarrassed. I made no effort to hide or otherwise put out of sight
my own evidence of virility.

David,
then Peter climbed up and out of the pool. Peter got David's
crutches for him, and then Peter said, “We're going to the pool
room... anybody want to join us?”

Glances
were given and received by all around...

In
the midst, Grandma came out of the house. She announced that dinner
would be ready in no more than an hour.

Starved
hungry, we acknowledged her announcement. She giggled wildly as we
all bellied up to the side of the pool to hide the evidence of
teenage maleness in full speed ahead.

When
in the shower room... Jesus nor I had any reservations about
'assisting' each others' journey to a planet way off in the distance.
The guys were paying no attention to us. They were too busy with
meeting their own needs, and the needs of their Bonded One.

Once
we were rested up from the rather short journey from here to there,
and from there to here... showers were taken, and since there were no
needy poles to lead our way... we headed into the house bare and
unconcerned. Even I felt no misgivings, shame, guilt, or any of the
other usual negative feelings. Jesus and I sat down on the a
bar-stool apiece.

Most
everybody did, however, look at my leg, my stump that is. Even I
looked down to see exactly what they were looking at... initially, I
wondered if my penis had arisen from Jesus' touch on my back with his
right hand cupped on my left butt cheek... I was not hard at all...
instead, I saw a somewhat different stump – instead of
gnarled... I saw some muscle definition clearly evident.

David
came to me, got down on his hands and knees, and looked at it
intently. He then looked into my eyes and said, “Dude, you've
been working out... kewl, way to go!”

Andy,
the curious one, walked over, looked at my leg, too, and then...
checked out my penis. I reached down, lifted it up and away from its
resting place between my twin orbs, looked at it carefully. It
looked different though I couldn't put my finger on what exactly what
was different about it.

Benji
walked over to us. He looked into my eyes, seemingly asking for
permission to view it. I nodded.

He,
too, got on his hands and knees, observed it carefully... feeling
okay about myself, I lifted it up once again so that he could see all
of it. I rolled around the skin just before the corona. The
sensation was way too good to keep doing it, so I quit. Benji looked
all around the room to see if any adult was present. There wasn't.
He said nothing, but he smiled widely. The look in his eyes said it
all.

Goose-bumps
adorned my arms and I shivered. Thinking I was cold, which I was
not, Jesus put his arms around my torso and pulled me into him. He
was warm, and he was inviting.

Unfortunately,
the touches and attention paid their toll. Jesus giggled at seeing
my penis pulsing and rising to the occasion. Sensing my impending
embarrassment, he got up, went into the bathroom next to the TV room,
and came back with my shorts and underwear, which, with his help and
assistance, I put on.

By
the time cleanup was performed, the dishwasher loaded and started,
trash taken out, and plates, glasses, silverware and bowls put away,
the hour had passed. We headed back outside, swam for a while, and
then it was suggested that we return to the pool room to 'shower'.

Although
both Jesus and I were hard as flag poles, we decided against it.
Unknowingly, yet with intense feelings, all of which were somewhat
confusing to us, we decided not to join them. Instead, we sat
together in a comfortable chase lounge, side by side, with our arms
wrapped around each others' shoulders and torsos.

When
we were alone, I looked into Jesus’ eyes. The intensity of the
moment was nearly palpable. If I could have touched his irises then
I would have felt them pulsing, but, as it were, I only sensed they
were. Otherwise, I was totally into him. Sensing the intensity of
the moment, he looked up and into my eyes. His lips parted slightly,
the tip of his tongue jetted out just slightly as if he were going to
moisten them… but, we were already wet. So why did he do
that?

Although
I’m pretty darned smart in the book department, I have so much
to learn about life and other people… especially him. He’s
very complicated, yet his needs and wants are so very simple and few.

“Earth
to Adam.” Two voices snickered in unison.

Startled,
we looked around. David was grinning, as were Peter, Matt and Andy…
the rest were watching us... were they waiting for us to 'do'
something? I couldn't read their intentions.

Peter
silently nodded.

Seemingly
on autopilot, together, Jesus and I, headed up the back stairs to my
room. He closed the doors behind us, and then turned to me and
smiled impishly; like he was inviting me into his inner sanctuary,
into his heart.

Our
shower was quick and to the point... no messing around... just soap
and water... but there was something stronger going on between us...
something that couldn't be explained away... yet we understood
exactly what it was, fully and completely, without any trace of
doubt.

When
we lay down in bed, our arms and legs intertwined in a most thrilling
way. Our lips joined... and, no, they didn't join with hesitation or
nervousness... instead, we joined in a way that neither of us had
ever before experienced with anybody else, period.

I
do not know what made me do what I did next... I just did it solely
on spontaneity, like I was a robot or something... and an emotional
one, at that.

I
got up from the bed, walked into the hallway without hesitation or
bothering to put anything on over my raging hardness, opened the
linen closet door, retrieved a fresh new bottle of body lotion,
returned to our room, laid down on the bed, brought my legs up to my
chest, and handed the bottle to Jesus.

I'd
never before had any inclination of wanting something to go inside of
me... 'that' had always been a place which provided only relief into
a porcelain receptacle, against a tree, under a bush, or elsewhere,
depending on the situation or circumstance or urgency.

Jesus
had other plans, though... not so fast, I gathered. He gently pushed
my thighs and leg back down to the bed, crawled onto me so that we
were face to face, and it was there and then that, once again, we
joined our lips in a most titillating manner.

When
we'd come up for air, he’d begin softly, urgently speaking in
his native tongue... like he was possessed, or something.

Slowly,
our breathing returned to normal, but our bodies were totally on
fire. There was nothing we could do about it except to roll with the
ebb and flow of our spirits joining, and separating just enough so
that we yearned for more.

He
surprised me… maybe it was that he felt I was just about to
blow a cork… yes, I felt yearning, but it wasn’t the
usual kind, like when I was taking care of my own needs… with
only one destination in mind.

Different?
Yes. Bad? No. Good? Yes, absolutely, no doubt.

As
quickly as a rabbit moves about, he kissed my lips one more time, and
then headed down my neck, chest, belly, finally landing into the
forest of pubes, which was about to get rained on should he touch it.

He
didn’t touch my penis even though I desperately wanted him to.
Instead, he urged me to raise my legs up and over my head. I felt
totally vulnerable... what was he doing?

And
then my question was answered... without another moments' hesitation,
I heard a deep intake of air, and then felt it blow against my nether
regions, and then I felt same being touched... like I was being
spread apart, down there... between my butt cheeks... and then it
happened.

He
touched me. There.

But
it wasn't any old touch... no, not at all, it was wet... and the
touch nearly took me off of the bed and into orbit. But, his firm
hold on my hips kept me from leaving the bed.

Then
awareness came.

I
was just about to stop him, knowing where he was, but then I couldn't
believe the pleasurable sensations his touch was sending through my
entire body… if ever there was time when I about lost ‘it’
– it was then.

And,
I was also afraid. I was so afraid that he’d find something so
totally repulsive that he'd leave me forever… but I was to
worry not – deliberately he snaked his tongue into that deep
dark cavern… a place where, never in a million gazillion
years, I would ever have imagined anyone being, or me being, for that
matter.

And,
oh my God, the pleasure… holy shit!

Carried
away on some distant planet, enjoying the colorful scenery before my
eyes, I felt something touch my lips… immediately, I
recognized the touch as being from him… his kisses are unique,
unlike any I’d ever felt before in this lifetime… mind
you, other than Mom touching my lips, and Jesus’ early attempts
at bringing me love – which I had denied … I had no real
experience with kissing…

He
was kissing me? But what was that touching me below, down south of
the border, right between my cheeks – there?

Jesus
giggled. Unable to stop myself, I wrapped my arms around his torso,
let them travel down his back, and then, without hesitation, cupped
my hands on his butt and pulled whatever that was … deeper
inside me... the feelings were magnificent ... I couldn't stop
them... I didn't want to stop them... so I didn't.

I
welcomed that feeling. I welcomed his entry, and I helped him to
reach the end of the tunnel. He tensed up. I thought he was
hurting... but then he pulled out, nearly all the way, and then
without warning he slammed back into me, to the hilt. He was
gasping, and then it happened.

He
screamed his arrival on the far distant planet named Jupiter...
though he was speaking in his native tongue, making no sense to me...
I, right then and there, promised that I'd learn his language so that
I understood... yet... I did understand... as his body shook and
rocked and rolled – I knew exactly what was happening... I
brought my hands back up his spine, and then grasped his head and
brought his lips to mine.

As
his moment began ebbing away, he started to get up and off me, but...
I wasn't ready for him to leave yet. Quickly, I ran my hands down
his back, held him steady, and then he collapsed against my belly and
chest, whimpering slightly, attempting to sob, but he was unable to
fully express his feelings until I pulled his face into my neck and
held him gently.

I
kissed his cheeks lightly, all the while whispering love, words of
encouragement and praise. He began lightly crying, like his little
heart was about to explode with bliss and happiness. His heart was,
indeed, pumping like a pump gone mad. His breathing was slow to
return to normal as he continued to cry.

I
put down my legs, then grabbed him into my arms and held on tightly
as he expressed his overflowing emotions into my neck.

I
knew he wasn't finished expressing his emotional upheaval when he
lifted off, lay down beside me and pulled legs up high in the air. I
quickly pulled him into my arms, and held him tight... I knew that he
needed me worse in that way than me entering his soul place.

We
didn't speak... nothing needed to be said. We just needed to 'be'.
And that is exactly what we did... for the rest of the night. I got
very little sleep, but that was okay. He'd awaken every once in a
while, sniffle once or twice, and fall back to sleep after I pulled
him back into my chest and belly with my arms around his form.
Sometimes, he'd awaken only enough to take in a really deep breath
and exhale.

Finally,
at about 4:30am, after he'd been sound asleep, without interruptions,
for over an hour, I allowed myself to fall off to sleep, though I did
not sleep soundly, always awaiting him to wake up again. I swore a
solemn oath, on my grave, that I'd always protect the boy lying in my
arms. I hoped against all hope that my love, encouragement, hope and
morale was passing in and through him. It was then and there that I
realized I could love without strings attached... not that I'd ever
learned to put strings on anybody... it's just that I'd never loved
anyone as deeply as I did him.

Eventually,
after waking from one of my sleeping 'spells' the urge to pee could
no longer be denied. Jesus was still sleeping soundly, all the while
nestled in close, slightly snoring. I leaned down, kissed the top of
his head, and then made my way out of bed, dropped to the floor,
scooted into the bathroom, hoisted myself onto the toilet and let
loose with a torrent of pent up urine... and, at the same time, some
things from the other side of my anatomy.

Finished,
flushed, and hands washed I scooted back into my bedroom proper.
Jesus was lying on his side, facing the bathroom, and with the
sunlight behind his head he looked just what I understood an angel to
look like. I scooted in closer, and genuinely thought he was still
sleeping, however, up went his head so that our eyes met. His face
brightened, as if it could light up anymore than it already was…
he smiled… and that completed the transformation into official
‘angel’. Then he lowered his head down off the side of
the bed, closed his beautiful eyes, licked his lips, and then
puckered them up in such a way that they looked like an ‘O’.

His
invitation was not to be denied. I closed the distance in record
time, and then put my mouth purposefully and completely and entirely
over his.

I
was so very close to losing it… he must have sensed it…
he’s quite intuitive I came to learn and respect… he
bounded off the bed in a backward somersault over my head. Landing
on his feet, he giggled and then headed into the bathroom, sat down
on the toilet, groaned and grimaced, stared into my eyes like there
was no tomorrow… and then he smiled, folded his hands together
as if he were praying thanksgiving.

Inwardly
I had to and did giggle at seeing his animation… you could
clearly see when his efforts were rewarded… his eyes would go
wide open, then they’d close when he was working really hard,
and then he’d open them back up, and begin clapping his hands –
if only briefly.

After
four repetitions, he grinned widely and gave me a thumbs’ up,
and then sent me a blow-kiss.

After
taking care of the rest of the business, the toilet was flushed, and
then he jumped into the shower and got the water to running. He
poked his head out, waved his hand inviting me to join him, gave me
his million dollar smile, and disappeared behind the partial wall
separating the main bathroom and the shower enclosure.

How
can you deny that?

Ya
can’t. No way. Not ever. Never. Any denial would be
sacrilegious. He knew I couldn’t resist. And, no, I couldn’t
resist, and didn’t.

He
washed me meticulously, leaving nothing unturned... at least until he
got to my penis, which was waving madly in the air…
correction… it was waving with pure unadulterated - lust.

He
handed over the washcloth, saying that he didn't want to get started
on my prong because of the fear that he wouldn't be able to stop.
Okay, I got the message – but I didn’t want him to stop…
no way… my nads were in a complete and utter state of needing
to be released.

I
didn’t trust myself, so I just squeezed the lather over my
tool, and left it at that. Totally amazed at the whole thing of
washing my pole, he expressed his feelings, “How do you not
make it shoot? Mine always shoots!”

He
then looked up into my eyes… he was dead serious, needing an
answer.

As
serious as I could be, because I meant to be, because I, too, was
curious, I said softly, “I don’t know.”

He
kissed my lips then laid down flat on his back on the marble shower
ledge, closed his eyes, and slightly spread apart his legs. The
sight of him was breathtaking… I could sit for hours and hours
watching him, and I have indeed taken occasions during the night to
do just that.

I
then washed him from the top of his head to the tips of his toes,
with a tickle or two thrown in for good measure, but he didn't want
me to tickle him, so I quit. He then lay across my lap, offering his
bottom for my close up inspection. Without delay, I squeezed out a
generous dollop of body soap and gently, carefully, and with a strong
urge to show him my love, washed his bottom so that it was squeaky
clean. I didn't insert my finger inside even though I wouldn't have
minded doing so, remembering how much pleasure I'd experienced when
he'd done it to and for me.

After
drying off, Jesus took my hand and scooted to the bed with me. He
then climbed up and helped me to get up, too. We then became a
tangle of arms, legs, and sex organs. I felt myself quickly reaching
a plateau, and I was contented with where we were going and what we
were doing... I was in heaven, pure and simple.

Wearing
a full mischievous grin, Jesus interrupted our interlude into love
making by reaching above my head, to the bedstead and grabbing the
bottle of body lotion. He then positioned himself over my lower
regions, started to squeeze out some of the stuff, but I stopped him.
I took hold of the bottle, sat it back on its perch, rolled him over
onto his stomach, rubbed his back, and then kissed his spine all the
way from his neck to that little knob just between his twin
half-spheres.

I
had never even thought about a butthole being sexy, or even a guys'
butt for that matter... however, he was different. I would overcome
any obstacles or hold-ups, no matter what it took. I recalled how
he'd attacked my hole without a single qualm or hesitation. Any
reserve I may have had evaporated when I realized he'd taken a dump,
and how much care and attention I'd paid to him in the shower... I
sniffed a couple of times just to make sure... but I was on a mission
to pleasure him no matter what it took to do so.

With
that, I rearranged myself so that I was lying between his
outstretched legs. I kissed each cheek, then, with my tongue went
deep into his recess. I spread apart those globes so that he would
receive everything, and then some, of what he'd given me the night
before.

He
began wiggling around like crazy when I used my tongue as a spear.
Slowly, he relaxed just enough so that my tongue was able to enter
with some difficulty, but the longer I kept at it the more he
relaxed, until he was wide open. I lapped up and around and applied
much attention to that which was bringing him lots and lots of
pleasure sensations... the more he responded the more I wanted to
give him.

Nonchalantly,
he reached up to the shelf, retrieved the bottle of lubrication, and
tossed it backward so that it landed right next to his hip. He then
turned his head around, smiled, and nodded.

I
was very nervous at the thought of entering his passageway. I'm not
the biggest dick that ever walked the earth, yet, from interactions
with his butthole with my tongue, I knew that he didn't have the
biggest butt in the world. Add to those concerns: I’d never
made love to someone. I wanted our coupling to be as pleasurable for
him, as I anticipated it being for me. With anxiety running through
my veins, I kissed my way back up to the back of his head, then
turned him over and explained and expressed my concerns.

Tears
began streaming down his eyes, once again. I leaned in, touched each
and every one of them with my lips, and used my tongue as a squeegee,
to lap them up. They were sweet tasting little drips of honey. But
I had no idea why he was crying again, until he said, “You
won't hurt me, Adam. You're different. Please... I need to feel
you. His body violently shuddered, and then his eyes turned to
pleading with his heart. Very softly, he added, “I know how to
relax... please make love to me, yes?”

Not
waiting for my response, he grabbed the bottle of lotion and handed
it over, pulled his legs up high, and waited while I thought this
whole situation over again... not because I didn't want him... but
because I'd promised I'd never hurt him, no matter what. While my
penis had been hard while ministering to his needs, it had completely
gone down while thinking that I could possibly hurt him.

My
desire was there... I wanted to please this guy, and I wanted to make
him feel good... first and foremost... instead of working to harden
my tool, I dove back into his intelligent source with vigor, and,
very soon, he had relaxed, and and my pole of pleasure was ready,
willing and able.

I
carefully surveyed the situation. He seemed to be open wider than
he'd been before... if I had to estimate its size, it would have been
open a little more than a silver dollar.

Still
concerned that I'd hurt him, I took the bottle of lotion, squeezed
out a generous amount into my hand, and then, using my fingers,
entered first one and then two – that totally relaxed him... he
was as open as open can be. Meanwhile, he was moaning and
groaning... not from pain... no way... he would urge his butt up and
I put my fingers in...

Satisfied
that he could possibly take me, I, for one last gesture to make sure
he didn't hurt, tipped the bottle up, put the nipple against his wide
open hold and then squeezed a generous amount inside.

Putting
myself in position directly over his upturned butt, I laid down,
permitting my raging and nearly out of control penis to softly lie
between his cheeks... Meanwhile, I whispered into his ear, “I'm
going to read your body language... if I sense that you are having
any pain whatsoever, I'm going to stop.” He rolled over just
enough to join us together in a mad passionate kiss, and then he
lowered his head to where it was resting between the pillows. I
grabbed an extra pillow that had fallen to the floor, and placed it
under his hips. I then kissed his cheeks, and, at the same time,
noticed the lube was slowly oozing out of his still wide open anal
orifice.

With
trepidation, I aligned my rock hard tool to his offering place and
put the head up against the opening. Jesus pushed his butt up and
out as soon as we touched.

Encouraged,
somewhat, I put some pressure against his back door. He accepted it
willingly. At no time did my eyes leave the side of his face... I
was looking for any inclination that I needed to stop.

Seeing
none, I put more pressure down and up, rolled my penis around, top to
bottom and from side to side. That got him to giggling, and me too,
but I wasn't really giggling to be giggling... I was still very, very
nervous about the position we were in. Meanwhile, the head of my
penis very nearly popped through. I felt him tense so I backed up.

The
head of my penis is smaller than the rest of my dick, quite unlike
his, which had kind of a mushroom appearance to it... his shaft, cute
as could be just as it was, was smaller whereas mine was bigger. I
thought, while thinking about it a little bit, that his penis was
cute... and I definitely wanted some more of what it had to offer.

I
took a chance and put my chest down on his back, bent my back back so
that it was poised properly. I wiggled around a little bit to make
sure I was headed straight in the right direction.

“Are
you ready, Amigo?” He said, then without waiting for a
response, began bearing down with everything he had going for him...
I had to laugh when a big puff of air exited his receptacle, because
it tickled.

At
the same time, though, I did as he told me to do, and pushed, and
pushed all the way inside, until my healthy smattering of pubes were
resting on his globes.

His
eyes popped wide open, tears started flowing out of his eyes, yet he
didn't appear to be in any pain, in fact, if anything, his hips
raised up just that much more... any hesitation that I'd had
evaporated when he squeezed down on my dick very firmly. Since I was
all the way in, I relaxed and laid down on top of him, allowing my
dick to just lazily be present. He would alternately squeeze and
relax... it was driving me absolutely crazy... it was the first time
my maleness had been inside of another human being... so much emotion
was cresting and welling up inside me that tears began flowing freely
from my eyes. I wrapped my arms around his chest and sobbed quietly,
and whispered how much I loved him from the bottom of my heart, and
then so much more.

“I've
never done this to anybody ever before... I'm just feeling us
together... we're one, you know.”

“Yes,
I know. Please put your sperms in me... we can lie here all day
long... but I need your sperms, please.”

Hearing
his words, knowing how so very much I loved him, and with all my
reserves falling by the wayside... I backed my penis out to just
where the head was inside, and then pushed it back in, knowing that I
had a hair trigger anyway, and being inside of the dude I loved with
all my heart... he got his wish on the next installment. I didn't
pummel on or in him... instead, I just made little motions that
brought me into maximum overdrive. I'd never experienced an orgasm
like that, ever, and I was a pretty damn good masturbator, at least
I'd thought so anyway.

Of
course, the experience was made all the better because he was
clenching and relaxing his muscles.

And
then, my moment which had been steadily approaching – arrived.
And with arrival came oblivion...

Spent
and totally satisfied, I collapsed onto his back and butt, but kept
my still extended maleness inside of him, just as he'd wished.
Whatever his wishes were – they were my command.

When
I fully returned to Earth, I lowered my hands into his groin, grasped
his penis... and found that the sheets beneath him were already wet.
He giggled, but didn't hesitate when I began stroking with clear and
convincing intent and purpose... meanwhile, my ardor returned in full
force and effect... he tensed up and began ramming my hand during his
moment of release... and at the same time, well, I was a goner, in
the best possible way, spilling yet another dose of sperms into the
love of my life, just as he requested.

With
nothing left to give, other than our lips and our love, we turned
over onto our sides, nose to nose, lips to lips, and quickly fell
asleep, totally satisfied.

*-*
Meanwhile, outside the French doors of Adam's, and now Jesus' room
*-*

Andy
snickered to Harry, “I told you so!”

While
the two boys were reveling in their newly found knowledge and
acknowledgment, Benji, Allen, Angel, Matt and David were walking up
the stairs to their rooms after an early afternoon swim, probably to
do what had gone on in Adam and Jesus' room for the first time.

Benji,
clearly distressed, urged his mates, his Bonded Ones, into their
room, at which time he turned to Andy, and said with irritation in
his voice, “You have no right to invade their privacy... it is
their Bonding Moment. Being interrupted would have destroyed them!
They could have never returned as the same people they were... while
they are now different, they would have had a difference that nobody
could possibly love.”

Benji
looked to William then to Harry then to Andy...

Nothing
more needed to be said, so nothing more was said... intent upon
joining from their minor rift, and feeling the intensity and knowing
that they could have hurt and harmed their brothers... well, they
joined in a sandwich.

...

Later,
back in Adam's room, it was Grandma that knocked on their door loud
enough to raise them from a dead restful and rejuvenating sleep. She
stuck her head through the partially opened door after being
acknowledged, after they covered their nakedness. To say she was bit
surprised to see Jesus more or less lying on top of Adam, is putting
it somewhat mildly.

Undeterred,
feeling a tremendous love emanating from the room, from the boys in
particular, she entered, walked to the bed, leaned down and kissed
both boys' cheeks loving and tenderly.

Standing
up, she announced, “Apple Strudel”.

Both
boys' eyes lit up... all sleep and all interest in same was gone,
just like that. Without hesitation, Adam threw back the covers...
but then realized they were totally naked, hesitated, but when Jesus
bounded out of bed... he did too. Grandma respectfully exited their
room, at which time Adam, being a little bit more reserved than
Jesus, got out of bed, strode into the bathroom... found Jesus
sitting on the throne exiting that which needed exiting. He got into
the shower, turned on the water and adjusted it to just right.

Finished,
Adam gave Jesus a pair of underwear to put on... they were way too
too big... but nobody cared. Adam did likewise, and they headed
toward the kitchen, their tummies growling and letting them know how
they'd been abused through neglect.

Mom
inquired about their 'sleeping in'. Jesus looked to Adam to answer
her questioning. Adam, taking the cue, after receiving a nod from
the younger boy, said, “Uhm, well, <he took Jesus' hand in
his> we've talked about a lot of things... I can't really explain
it very well... but... we're together. I love him. I love you, too.
I hope you aren't angry.”

At
that, tears began running from Adam's eyes onto his cheeks, then they
slid down and landed on his shirt.

Starting
with Grandma, the family mobbed the two new Bonded Ones with hugs,
congratulations, and from Matt, “It's about time, you guys!”

Then
we heard sirens, lots of them. They were getting closer and closer
and closer, and then they stopped. Seconds later, several men and
women, in full uniform, with guns drawn at the ready, entered the
patio, and then a team of 5 entered the house without so much as an
explanation.

To
say the family was both shocked and scared... is an understatement...

*-*
Dad's POV *-*

Antoine
and I took off for our appointments, one of which was to have the
Escalade serviced because the engine was running rough, and it needed
a set of tires put on all around.

They
gave us a loaner vehicle to drive while ours was in the shop. I'd
made prior arrangements for a Corvette. To say my son was surprised
would be an understatement. We took off for the beach, as our first
appointment was a couple of hours away.

I'd
known for some time that Antoine needed some one-on-one time with me.
He'd subtly hinted around about it for a week or so. Between the
schedules for the two of us, we simply weren't able to get together
sooner.

My
son was all smiles. His eyes lit up with excitement when I got onto
the 31 at Puunene, and then put my foot into the carburetor for about
2 miles until we met up with traffic. I'd decided we'd go down to
Kalama Beach to be by ourselves.

The
beach was crowded, yet I knew we would largely be alone walking at
waters' edge. And we were. Surprisingly there weren't too many
people around, and the ones that were beach going kept to themselves,
permitting us to walk unencumbered.

When
we got free of the visitors, I put my arm around his shoulders. He
put his around my waist. He said, “Dad, Sensei is very ill.
His time on this Earth is very short. Benji, as you already know,
talks to him frequently. Although he doesn't say much, I can tell
that he's worried, too. Although he was very excited to come here to
Hawaii, his heart strings are still attached to his Grandfather. I
understand where he's coming from.”

My
son squeezed my side muscle. He then went quiet. I looked down to
see his head hang low, almost to his chest. I pulled him in close,
closer than we already were. I then kissed the top of his head,
stopped for a moment, and then brought him into a hug, held him
firmly while he composed himself.

His
Sensei had taught him so very much. In fact, I had the distinct
feeling that Benji's grandfather had been there for him, in thick and
thin, when his parents weren't, couldn't, or wouldn't. I was leaning
toward choices 1 and 3. “Couldn't” wasn't even an
option. He'd been their son after all, and if they wouldn't have
been so damned selfish, self-centered and greedy, and depending on my
boy to support their rich and out-of-normal-everyday lavish
lifestyles, he might have still been their son, living with them.
But – their loss, my gain. I was grateful.

Seeing
my boy distraught, for a brief moment I debated about taking Antoine
to see Father Ben. But then my mind returned to realize he just
needed some Dad-Son time alone so that he could best figure things
out... isn't that what a Dad is for? I know that I flew to California
to speak with my Dad just before making the decision to move away to
Hawaii. He'd been supportive, but left the final decision to Helen
and me.

The
thing was, though, that Helen and I were adults when the decision had
to be made; Antoine is a child despite his adult-like-expected
upbringing.

After
a few minutes of silence, and realizing he'd made his statement, I
said, “You know we could arrange for you and Benji to go to
Singapore again, to see your Sensei and his Grandfather one more time
before he passes into the next realm, right?”

Knowing
that money was no object in our household, he didn't use it as an
excuse to not accept my subtle offer to send him on a journey that he
and Benji needed to go on. I made the decision to send the boys.
They needed to go. They needed to say their goodbyes. I wasn't
concerned about Shoo, as she'd made her position well known about the
‘old man’, using her terms, during private conversations
Peggy, her and I had had. She'd left her homeland of her own free
will. She'd said, more than once, that she had no relations back
there, nor did she have any unfinished business.

At
the same time, I really wanted an adult to go with them, although
they probably didn't need one. I knew that Juan had an assignment in
Beijing come the following week... I also knew that Juan and Antoine
were tight in their relationship, a relationship that had begun under
less than stellar conditions, in fact, I still held some resentment
at Juan for doing what he'd done, how he'd lived, and what what had
been required to provide the means to live his own lavish
lifestyle... but we'd worked things out, and in fact, I'd clearly
seen, on more than one occasion, how valuable he'd been to my
Company, and, especially, my family. Those resentful moments were
far and few between, and they weren't strong when they periodically
did come up. And then I realized that had it not been for Juan's
activities, then our family would have not had Antoine, his mother,
and, yes, Juan, too, to bring unqualified and unending enrichment to
our lives. And then I remembered how he, Antoine, had brought hope
and life to Matt, how he'd saved David, Allen and Angel's lives, and
how he brought joy and life to both Peggy and me.

Though
Juan's mission was not yet known to anyone other than Fugi, Peggy,
me, and a few key operatives at the Company, I felt no problem with
at least telling Antoine, at this juncture.

Antoine
separated just a little bit. He looked into my eyes... his were
brimming with unshed tears. He nodded, then nestled into my chest,
renewed his hold, but then separated us again, and said, “Dad,
I haven't yet thanked him for all he's done... he was there for me
when nobody else was.”

He
patted my back, finished the separation, at least partially as his
arm returned to my waist, and then we continued walking down the
beach with no particular destination in mind.

I
said, “I want an adult to go with you. Now, what I'm about to
tell you isn't known to the family, yet. Juan has an assignment in
Beijing the week after next. I'll talk to him. I don't see that
he'll have any problem with going a week early. To my knowledge, the
jet will be available... I'll double check, and if it is free like I
believe it will be, should I go ahead and reserve it?”

“Dad,
this is something that Benji and I need to do together, alone. I
don't want to hurt Matt in any way... and I don't want William, Harry
and Andy to be hurt...”

I
easily replied, “I do not see them being hurt by you and Benji
taking care of business in this regard. I'm sure they'll understand.
Understand, too, that Benji will need to come to his own decision on
whether or not to take his Bonded Ones.”

“Uhm,
Dad, we've already kinda talked about making the trip by ourselves.
He's thinking just like me. I guess this will be putting closure on
our previous lives... it's hard to explain.”

“I
know, Son. I understand. I have no doubt that his Bonded Ones will
understand, too. Just talk to them like you're talking to me. Be
honest and forthcoming. These attributes always, without fail, win
each and every time, though there are times when they may not seem
so.”

With
that, I kissed the top of head once again, pulled him into a hug, and
then we continued our journey, talking about this, that and
everything else that came to mind.

When
we arrived at the pier, we walked out to watch the surfers doing
their thing for an hour or so, before we needed to return to the
dealer to settle up on the repairs.

Having
satisfied our need to alone and quiet, we headed down to the beach.
We took off our shoes and socks, We took off, walking quietly side by
side, all the while dodging the smaller breaking waves along the way.
During our trek, my cell phone rang to announce a call.

It
was the service manager from the dealer saying that I needed to
return so that we could talk. He didn't sound very excited, and
wouldn't say what we needed to talk about.

Upon
arrival at the dealer, the service manager took us through the shop
to the other side and out the back door. To say that I was surprised
at seeing police, fire and rescue in their holding lot, would be an
understatement. At the same time, Antoine pointed just beyond the
emergency vehicles. It was then that I saw what remained of our
vehicle, the Escalade.

Due
to all the personnel milling about, I didn't see Fugi in their
midst... he's not very tall so he's easily overshadowed. I looked to
Antoine... he, too, was shocked. His eyes were wide open. When Fugi
noticed us standing by the huge sliding doors, he made his way
through the crowd, headed for us, and then, with grave expressions
clearly coming and going on his face, arrived and wanted to pull me
aside, away from Antoine.

I
thought differently. I said, “Let me take Antoine to the
waiting room. We'll talk then.”

“Jim,
one of my guys will need to stay with him.” With that said,
Fugi turned toward the crowd, pulled out his sat phone, and spoke
into it for a brief few seconds.

My
gut began churning, knowing, feeling that something was very, very
wrong. I just didn't know what it was, yet. I was feeling torn in
half, perhaps even in several pieces... my immediate concern was
Antoine, and at the same time, I was worried about those back home.

Seconds
later, a man, appearing to be in his early 30's came walking to us.
I didn't recognize him. He didn't work for my Company... I knew
everybody that worked there... as I interviewed each and every
employee before they were hired.

Fugi
spoke, professionally, “Jim, this is Tom Bradford. He's a
special agent with the Hawaii office of the FBI. He's going to be
with Antoine.”

Antoine,
my son, meanwhile, had his arm around my waist. His grip
tightened... I could feel his fear, yet I didn't know what to do
about it because I didn't have all the facts. I'm sure he felt my
fear, too, though I tried to keep it in check. I said, “Go
ahead and go with him... I'll be right there.”

He
nodded. I hugged him in close, kissed the top of his head, and then
sent him with Agent Bradford.

Fugi,
gravely concerned, took me to the Escalade, or what was left of it.
It was a total loss, burned beyond recognition. The only way I knew
it was ours was because I'd driven it so many times. Otherwise it
just looked like another burned out shell of a vehicle.

When
we arrived in front of it, Fugi spoke, “Jim, we found evidence
of an incendiary device under the right rear quarter panel.
Actually, it was a very sophisticated bomb that would have caused
grave physical injury, likely death. Our people, the FBI and ATF are
all over it. Right now, at this very moment, we've taken a valet
driver into custody. The duties of valet driver is to take a vehicle
from and to the reception area for customers, park the vehicle here
in the lot, and then leave it alone until it's time for repairs.
We've determined the bomb had been present for about one week, based
on markings etched in the frame. Jim, we feel that the bomb, in all
actuality, was a dud, and thankfully so.”

He
didn't say anything for a moment... he didn't need to... the gravity
of the 'situation' sunk in, leaving not a trace of doubt that our
lives had been in danger. I decided to not get pissed...

But
who?

But
why?

When
was our vehicle out of sight, other than for running errands, and
going out to eat at a restaurant we ate at frequently? My anxiety
and fear returned with vengeance. I turned my attention back to
Fugi, my heart was racing, and my lungs seemed like they were going
to explode… At seeing my state of being, and before I could
say anything, Fugi quickly said, “Your family is safe. There
are no less than 50 people scouring your estate; they are surrounding
your family… trust me, Jim, they are safe… I promise
you.”

“Where's
Juan?” I asked, suddenly seriously concerned. He was working
a mission on the island as we spoke... other than to say it was a
rescue, I can't say anything more about what it entailed.

“He's
enroute to your location, Jim. He knows what's going on. He's
waiting for a call from you. I'm sorry, Jim, this is all I know
right now. A limo is on its way to take you and Antoine home. It
should be here momentarily. Sir, until we know exactly who's
responsible for this situation, we are on Devcon-1.”

Devcon-1
is the highest possible state of alert. It means a situation has
already occurred. It does not mean that a threat is imminent.

*-*
Antoine's POV *-*

As
Mr. Bradford escorted me into the service department's waiting area,
no less than 3 agents joined us. By the looks of their suit jackets,
it wasn't hard to see and realize they were heavily armed.

“What's
going on?” I asked demanding an answer, not knowing if my
family was safe at home... where was Jeremy... weren't he and Jason
going to the beach for alone time?

“Hey
babe; are you okay?” I asked rapidly, not really caring if I
was understood... there was no time... my senses were on full
alert... contrary to previous precarious situations, my body was
betraying my training to be calm at all times... my heart was -
racing... my breathing – labored... my vision – tunneled,
even my legs were shaking...

Matt
said, “What the fuck's going on around here? There's cops all
over the fucking place... they won't even let us go into the house...
we're, uhm, not even dressed, if you know what I mean... We can't
even go to the pool house to get towels...”

“I
don't know what's up... other than our vehicle's toast... it's burned
beyond burned. Matt, just do what they say.”

Sometimes
Matt gets radical when he's super nervous or upset... without so much
as saying I love you or fuck you... he disconnected our call.

I
sent him a text message, “Love you!”

I
put the phone back into my pocket, got up from the seat I was sitting
on. Two of the agents eyed me suspiciously. Without worrying about
it, I walked to the door to the men's room. One of the agents said
to the others, “It's clear.” And then to me, “Son,
we'll be here at the doorway.”

Somewhat
caught up in the moment, still not fully in control of myself, I
barked, “I ain't your son.”, opened the door, went in,
entered a stall, dropped my pants and underwear, sat down to think
and reflect on the situation, trying against everything to find
something or someone that would have set them off to do this fucking
shit to our family... my family. I started down that road of
thinking that I hadn't protected them... those thoughts were quickly
dispelled when the bathroom door opened, and I heard Dad's voice say,
“Are you okay in there, Son?”

“Yeah,
Dad, I'm just using it... Dad, what's going on?” I asked... I
was surprised with the tone of my voice... instead of being focused
and on full alert... it sounded almost child like... like I was
scared... you know like the truth comes smacking you around...

I
hadn't planned to actually using the facilities other than to just
sit down, away from everybody, so that I could think... but my belly
said differently...

I
heard the door close... and then the sounds of water hitting the
porcelain urinal fixture were heard... just as my bowels emptied,
quite violently. As they passed, I said into the air, hoping against
all hope that Dad would hear me, “I'm scared, Dad.”

Softly,
Dad said, “I'm concerned. Are you going to be okay? I mean...
fear may be an ally... to be perfectly honest, Son, I'm kind of
afraid, too. But, Fugi's is all over it... law enforcement is all
over it... they're going to take us home so that we can all be
together. There's strength in numbers, you know.”

The
last one fell, followed by a whoosh of escaping air. Finished, I
cleaned up then joined Dad at the sink. I looked at the man in the
mirror, the same one who'd taken me in, loved me when I couldn't
stand myself... I wanted to close myself off, to swallow and hide the
fear that I was feeling... experiencing... knowing... Then the words
Sensei repeated over and over again came back to mind... “In
order to defeat the threat... you've got to find and see it... and
only then can you neutralize that which is needy of
neutralization...”

Suddenly,
as if a light switched on, I felt a sense of calm transcend over my
Spirit. I relaxed, and then my penis elongated, and then the
feelings of impending clothing catastrophe... before I could do or
say anything … it happened. I felt the warm gush of liquid
refreshments running down the inside of my legs... yeah, both of
them. Dad, meanwhile, put his arms around me, held me steady... and
kept me from falling to the floor on my face...

At
the same time I was looking into Dad's eyes, through the mirror, I
saw that I was smiling... and then, hopefully not bringing any
attention to myself... I chanced taking a look down to just below my
belt-line... seeing that my shorts were cool, calm and collected, I
did see a wet trail just below the hem of my left leg... “Dad,
I'll be right back... gotta use it again...”

With
that, I hurried back into the stall, got my shorts down, and then
carefully surveyed the carnage inside my underwear... seeing that my
inner shorts were totally soaked, I quickly took them both off…
The outside shorts, they were, thankfully, okay... not a drop... I
smiled thinking of Matt, thanking him for breaking the tension. I
closed my eyes, and then sent him everything I had from the depths of
my soul... knowing that paybacks are sweet, I smiled, and then
dropped my undies behind the toilet, tore off toilet paper, wiped my
leg that was wet from an unplanned seminal emission, sent by none
other than my Bonded One, tossed it into the toilet, stood up, pulled
on my outside shorts, flushed, and then returned to the sink where I
washed my hands – again. Dad had an amused smile on his
face... I felt my skin flush... Thankfully he didn't say anything to
make the little situation ... even more embarrassing.

Dad
and I returned to the waiting room, sat down... and waited.

A
few moments later, Matt sent a text message, it read: “You
fucker... I was talking to a FBI agent! :-)”

Paybacks...
of that variety... are priceless, and not soon to be forgotten.

I
looked up to see a huge hunk of a man standing in the doorway to the
waiting room. He had to have been 6 foot 8 inches tall, at least 380
pounds, and built like a Mac truck. I got up, headed to the hallway
separating the service department from the showroom floor in front...
two agents were standing at the door... the big dude motioned for us
to follow him. We trailed behind.

When
we walked through the service department, you know where cars were
actually worked on; the place was absolutely devoid of other humans.
At the large garaged door, a black Humvee was awaiting our arrival.
As soon as the agents surrounding it saw us, they looked all around,
and then the big man opened the door... urged us to enter, and then
it tore out, breaking all speed limits, surely. Everything passing
by was a blur... the digital readout on the dashboard read 80.

Within
minutes, normally a 30 minute ride, we arrived home. The driver
parked the vehicle right next to the wrought iron fence surrounding
the pool on all sides.

I
saw all my brothers sitting around the pool, all huddled together.
They looked up.

Matt
came running toward the vehicle. He was however, stopped by a man in
a black suit... what the fuck... the big dude exited the vehicle, as
did Dad... we were escorted into the pool area, and then we were
swarmed. Dad immediately went to Mom... she looked very upset.
Together they walked to where we, Matt and I, were standing. All the
while the security detail was carefully surveying the situation...
she pulled me into a deep, deep hug, and then kissed my cheek
meaningfully. I wrapped my arms around her waist, hugged her
firmly... as firmly as I dared… if she hadn’t been with
child… then all bets would have been off – I would have
hugged her to pieces… because that’s what I wanted to do
right then and there.

Matt
threw his arms around me, nearly squeezed the life right out of me...
not to worry... I loved it... and more importantly, I loved him with
all of my heart.

Out
of the corner of my eyes, I saw that Dad was being escorted inside
the house. Mom said, “That's a good sign... they won't let us
in... they aren't saying anything... do you know what's going on?”

Matt
and I released our death grips on each other. We turned to face her,
I said, “Mom, somebody, or some people torched our vehicle...
it's totally trashed... Dad and I know nothing more... maybe Dad
does... I don't know... the agents took me inside... anyway, Dad and
Fugi talked as soon as I left. That's all I know.”

Matt
dropped his hand, reached his hand inside my shorts, held onto my
left cheek, squeezed it gently, then released the hold but kept his
hand in place. I looked at him; he was totally unaware of what he
was doing... I decided to let it ride... I realized I need his touch
just as much as he needed to give it.

David
and Peter approached us. The agent permitted them access. We
hugged, deeply.

Peter
had been crying... the trail of tears was clearly present on his
face. I held onto him for more than a moment.

Shuddering
violently, Peter said brokenly, “I tried to tell everybody, and
I thought that those people were wrong... I've said it several times
that those guys told me that they were going to kill me if I ever
said anything...”

Mom,
taking over, took him into her arms, and said, “Peter, honey, I
don't know what's going on, yet... but I do know that you had nothing
to do with this... this is not your fault... oh child...”

*-*
Peter's POV *-*

The
feeling of my family all around me was comforting, yet, their love
and support only had minimal effect on dispelling the fear coursing
through my veins, as I clearly recalled the words of the fuckers
who'd taken me into their dark world kept coming back and back
again... I swear to God that they said they would kill me dead... the
look in Harley's eyes, at the time of his sentencing told me that
everything wasn't over... and that it wouldn't be over until I was
dead.

David,
from my backside, pulled me into a hug, held on firmly. Then Matt
and Andy came over. They put their arms around my waist, between me
and Antoine... as I constantly and consistently saw Harley's face.

Soon,
we had a mass of arms holding and protecting and reassuring each
other... after but a couple of moments, Benji walked to us. The look
in his eyes was somewhat distant, though he was intensely focused on
our states of being – I felt it – I knew it –
feelings of being safe... returned.

At
the same time, I felt a somewhat small issue rise and shine its
presence against the skin of my butt cheeks... David was there,
holding on firmly, pressing his maleness to keep it from being shown
to anybody and everybody... somehow, I maintained parade rest... but
I don't know how it happened. I did snicker. I turned my head,
raised my arm up and around to pull David's face to mine so that I
could kiss his lips, if only briefly.

Then
Dad came walking out of the house. His face registered relief. He
walked to us, and said, “Peter, Matt, Andy... I know what
you're thinking... it is without merit, though.” Dad then
looked to Fugi...

Fugi
took over, “I'm sorry that all of this happened to you. We
have been informed from reliable sources, collaborated by the
Department of Justice and Homeland Security, that what happened is a
random act of terrorism. The suspect in custody is a sole operator.
He's a loner. There's no indication that his actions are a part of
any organized or disorganized facet in any known terrorist group.
Nobody, other than he has claimed any responsibility... trust me...
the underworld is in a state of tremendous competition, and they are
quick to get caught in the media spotlight. The investigation into
this continues, as we speak, but we're absolutely confident that your
safety is assured. Life should get back to normal... the agents are
being withdrawn, though we are going to station two agents at the
driveway of your home... so anybody leaving or arriving will have to
pass through them, first.”

Antoine
spoke up, “But... he had to have known that it was us...”

“No,
Antoine, we believe that the activity was random... your family was
targeted by a depraved individual who has a vendetta against anyone
he perceives as being successful. Intel reveals that the young man
lost his job about a month ago... and actually, he's upset with the
whole system, so he found your vehicle because it represents
significant financial resources... he's a lone ranger. He has a
grudge against society.” Fugi explained.

The
way he said it... I believed him. The sick feeling that had been
deeply embedded within the pit of my stomach relaxed, somewhat.
Although it wasn't entirely gone, it was slowly dissipating moment by
moment.

An
agent with ATF stenciled across his back turned around to face us.
He said, “Your house is clear. You may enter and exit, at
will. There is no threat here.”

The
man then gathered up equipment, including a sonar device and other
sophisticated gadgets. Several others exited the house with varying
pieces of equipment, loaded them into black unmarked vans, and then
they took off.

The
agents then left, leaving behind only Fugi.

He
asked if there were any questions. There were none, so, he, too,
left the premises, leaving us alone to digest all that had happened.

Juan
exited the interior of our home. He was alone. Harry ran to him.
They embraced. Juan said, “The house is clear... there's no
sign that anything's been tampered with, and there's no evidence that
anyone other than you all have been here... we've reviewed
surveillance, and we see nothing out of the ordinary.” To Dad
he said, “Jim, if you'd like me to, I'll be glad to take you to
a dealer so that you can pick out a vehicle... otherwise consider me
your chauffeur until you can acquire one.”

“I'm
going to stick around here for today. Peter, would you come with
me... this won't take long... I promise...”

I
wondered what he wanted to talk to me about... I mean his request
just seemed a little out of the ordinary... sure he and I talked a
lot... David's thing was still entrenched... however, without
another thought, I walked to Dad... he then gave me an evil grin...
before I could react, he picked me up in his strong arms, and then
tossed me into the pool.

Well...
that meant war... and the war was on. He tossed his wallet and phone
in mom's general direction... just before Jeremy and Jason had their
way with him... clothes and all.

Emphatically
trusting dad, and Fugi, too, those old fears and terror soon passed
on out of my system... again... the only lingering thought was, “When
is 'this' going to end?”

*-*
Adam's POV *-*

We
had a total blast dunking, splashing, and generally raising all sorts
of hell with Jim, I mean Dad... in the pool... it all started, of
course, when he picked up Peter and tossed him into the pool...

Strange...
but gone was the embarrassment and self consciousness of being naked,
especially in front of the adults... and especially in front of
Grandma... I suppose the hold-back inside of my chest was caused by
the secret that Jesus and I held to ourselves... but I didn't have
time to worry about that... because... then their attentions turned
to me... and well, let's just say that my abilities to handle myself
in the pool were challenged... all in fun, of course. At no time did
I feel that I was in any kind of danger or anything... we were just
having hella fun. After the scare we'd all experienced, it felt good
to be playing around like little kids.

…

All
the while, Jesus never left my side... he was constantly and
consistently attempting to 'save me' from the clutches of my
brothers... yet, there were a couple of times when he, too, joined in
– dunking me, splashing me, but good. It was a conspiracy, I
tell ya.

Then...
it was his turn to receive the brunt of our family 'fun'... I stayed
by his side, all the while, however, I, too, had some serious fun
with him doing the same things he'd done to (and for) me.

Jim
was quite the sight... what with getting out of the pool... his
clothes were weighing him down, somewhat... he walked to Peggy... and
then much to her surprise, put his arms around her and pulled her in
close... effectively wetting her down.

Grandma
was laughing hard... I saw Jim's face light up, and then we all
laughed our asses off when he did the same thing to her as he'd done
to his wife. She took it all in stride, and then excused herself to
go inside the house.

At
dinner time, after our showers and 'play time', as brothers, Benji,
much to my surprise, looked into my eyes, and then discretely nodded.
I wasn't sure what he was getting at. I just felt a sense of
strength I hadn't known before descend over me. Jesus, meanwhile,
was playing footsie under the table... and then he stopped...

In
a moment of spontaneity, without rehearsal of any kind, I took his
hand in mine, raised it up, put them, together, on the table... but
then I was tongue tied... I didn't know how to say, or what words to
use to describe that Jesus and I were together...

Grandma
broke through... I felt myself light up like a Christmas tree when
she said, “Ah... ain't that cute...”

Surprised,
Jesus dropped the fork he was using to shovel food into his highly
erotic mouth. Quickly, he looked into my eyes, and then they darted
to his mother sitting between AZ and David... he squeezed my hand,
and then turned his attentions to me...

Knowing
that I needed to say something... I said calmly, reverently, “Jesus
and I are together... we're... yeah, we're together... I'm not sure
what happened to make me feel this way... but I do... I love him.
And, well, yes, uhm, we...”

Jim
said, “You don't have to tell us your secrets that originate
behind closed doors, Adam... I'm very happy for you... I sensed
something very, very different... and it's all good... okay,
everybody, here's the deal: Adam... I've gone ahead and made an
appointment with Richard, our family attorney... we meet with him
tomorrow to get the paper-work started. I know we talked about it...
but nothing happens if no action is taken... I'm happy that you
revealed something so very personal to you... Jesus, we love you,
too. We love everybody here... without question... Maria... do you
want to say something...

She
had kind of a blank stare on her face, like she didn't fully realize
what we were talking about...

Antoine
leaned into her and fully explained things to her using her native
language.

She
looked to her son with surprise clearly evident... yet... she wasn't
angry or anything. Instead, she got up from the table, walked to us,
leaned down, kissed her son, and then looked at me with an intensity
I'd never before seen... then, clearly, in perfect unbroken English,
she said, “You, take care of my son. Do not hurt him. He's
been hurt enough in his young lifetime. Bring him joy. Give him
what I cannot.”

Without
saying another word, she took my face in her hands, and then
tenderly, but decisively kissed each of my cheeks, and then turned
her attentions to her child, hugging him tightly into her bosom, with
tears freely flowing down her cheeks, and onto his shoulders.

Feeling
tightness in my chest and throat, the likes of which I'd never before
felt, tears began leaking freely from my eyes. Mom got up from her
chair, walked over, leaned down, and then she, too, kissed my cheeks
warmly and tenderly. She whispered, “I'm so happy for you...
telling us what you told us took a lot of courage... I'm so very
proud of you.”

Her
words only intensified my feelings of being okay with who I was, what
I was doing, where I was, and where I was going...

As
I looked all around the room to each and everybody, I saw only
support, love, care, and encouragement. David lifted up his glass,
clanked it with his fork to get everybody's attention. “Here's
to Adam and Jesus... here here!”

In
unison, everybody raised their glasses, and then took a swig of their
drink of choice... I said to Jesus, “We're supposed to do that,
too.” So we did. And then, he lowered his hand into my lap...
he was so close... yet he maintained just enough distance to be
respectful in front of everyone... though he was considerate... just
from the close contact with him... you guessed it... thankfully I was
wearing a long t-shirt that Dad had given to me to wear.

Dad,
still smiling, announced, “Adam, we have one more thing to tell
you... yes, we have an appointment with Richard tomorrow afternoon...
but in the morning, we have an appointment with Alex at a prosthetic
shop... he's going to fit you with something you can use to walk
with. The appointment is at 10:30, so don't stay up too late
tonight.” He then winked.

And
I wished there was a hole I could fall into and curl up in... My face
heated up… I was afraid I was going to spontaneously combust.
I looked to Jesus for comfort... he was smiling... what Dad had said
had gone completely over his head... his eyes were boring holes deep
into my soul…

I
said, “Okay... but I can't pay for it... can you give me some
chores to do so that I can earn it?”

I
looked to David... he simply rolled his eyes up into his head,
smirked, and then looked to Peter. Peter said, “Don't worry
about it... you don't have to earn the ability to walk around here...
I'll just say that getting everything down just right took David
about 5 minutes... you'll be fine.”

David
said, “Yeah, I'll help ya. Having strong thigh muscles is the
key thing... all the rest is gravy... please hand me the gravy,
Jeremy.”

That
was all that was said... everybody went back to eating just like
before the serious conversation opened up. I was suddenly famished,
despite having already eaten a plateful... seconds were had, and then
Grandma brought out her infamous apple and cherry strudel for
dessert.

That
evening, after some playtime in the pool, Jesus and I excused
ourselves, went to my room, opened the French doors to allow fresh
air to waft in, and then... well, we made a pretty short but intense
evening out of 'it'.

…

Dad
woke us up quite early, 8:30am to be exact... he announced that we
had an appointment to keep, and that I needed to get out of bed, take
a shower, get dressed, etc., then he closed the door, smiling.

Watching
my dude sleep beside me, I felt a streak of orneriness come on... I
reached onto the bedstead, retrieved the bottle of joy juice, as we'd
gone to calling it... my little man woke up at the exact point of
when my finger... okay... well... you already know... what happened
from there on out.

…

Arriving
at the shop at exactly 10:30am, via a huge Humvee limo, I noticed a
Harley sitting in the parking lot, right in front of the doors
leading in... I quickly surveyed it, looking carefully at each
detail... it was a 1983 HD, all decked out in fine dress to be
entirely proud of.

We
entered the building... immediately I went and sat down... in a way,
I really didn't want to be there... but, then again, I did.

A
man was sitting in a chair opposite me. He looked up, smiled, laid
the magazine in his hand down on the table. There was nobody else in
the office – just him, Dad and me. I wondered who the
motorcycle it belonged to... perhaps it belonged to the guy named
Alex, the prosthetist...?

Without
a second thought, I reached across the coffee table, retrieved the
magazine the guy, the only other person in the waiting room, had just
laid down... and began rifling through it with keen interest...
motorcycles had always been a love of mine... I had long hoped to
someday own one, ride it, and eventually go cross country when I was
old enough.

And
then I saw it.

A
picture.

Of
a Harley-Davidson.

Exactly
like the one sitting in front of the doors to the shop.

I
then recognized the person standing beside it. The theme of the
story was about a motorcycle gathering that had occurred in 1984.

Once
again, I looked at the man and then back to the picture.

The
man said, “That's me... way back in my younger years... I was
19 at the time... just out of diapers. Oh, by the way, my name's
Sam.”

“Adam.
Pleased to meet you, sir. Uhm, where were you when this picture was
taken?” I asked, curiously, intensely interested.

“We'd
ridden to Sturgis for a rally. It was a charity ride to raise money
for leukemia research and treatment. One of our riders had succumbed
to the disease some months before that picture was taken.” He
turned to Dad, and said, “You look familiar... weren't you in
here about a year, or so, ago... with another young man?”

Dad
replied, fondly, “Yes, that was my son David. This is Adam...
he's soon coming into our family, in fact, he already lives with us.”

“How's
David doing? I kind of wondered about him... he was kind of angry...
I think he was just scared. Heck, I was scared, too. I was much
older than these boys when I got my first one – I didn't know
what was going to happen... and I was pretty much feeling sorry for
myself. Oh woe is me.”

“So
what did you do?” I asked solemnly. I seriously felt that
same way... I'd grown accustomed to the crutches. I had had no plans
to do anything differently.

“I
wanted to ride. It's impossible with one leg. Plus I had to deal
with my fear of getting on a ride again... I just about gave up...”

“So...
what did you do?” I repeated, needing to know.

“I
wanted to ride more than I wanted to sit in some damn wheelchair for
the rest of my life... so I came in here... and got me a leg... and I
started my life over again... I have to tell ya, Son, that, at first,
it was a royal bitch trying to shift gears with that leg, but I
learned how. I don't regret it for one moment. Today, I’m in
here for an overhauling… Alex tells me there is this latest
and greatest model… who knows, maybe I’ll be a movie
star someday…” Sam said, smiling, cracking me up all
over the place.

“Uhm,
is that your ride in the parking lot?” I asked, suddenly
interested.

“That
it is. If you'll look carefully, you'll see that that bike is the
same one in the picture. I fixed my ride... it wasn't damaged all
that much so it was pretty easy to get back on the road...
<chuckling>... I didn't ride it for about 8 months... I tell
ya, it was harder for me to get up the guts to fire it up for the
first time, and it took me another month or two until I actually got
on it, and then it took another month to actually put it in gear and
take it out of the garage for a ride. I've not been off of it since
then.”

I
looked at Dad. He shrugged his shoulders, which left the ball in my
court. What was I going to do? Was I going to live my life in my
comfort zone, even tthough I wasn't all that comfortable? I'd looked
at people walking normally, and I'd seen people riding motorcycles
all my life. In fact, asshole at the group home rode a cheap-ass
rice-burner. He thought he was some kind of high-shit at pulling
wheelies in the parking lot... I then laughed out loud at remembering
how he, while showing off, ran into a light pole, throwing him to the
ground... he didn't like 17 boys from ages 6 to 17 laughing at him.
He made our life pure hell for a month or two after the mishap.

Just
then a man and a little girl of maybe 6 years old exited the hallway,
entering the waiting room. A woman, probably the girl's mother (they
looked so much alike), followed behind them.

What
really caught my attention was the fact that the little girl was
wearing shorts – and two prosthetic legs. Not one – but
– two. Both of her natural legs were absent. Eagerly, she
walked to Sam, climbed up on his lap, and told him all about her new
legs, and how she could walk.

Utterly
amazed, I looked at Dad. His eyes were filling with unshed tears. I
have to admit that I, too, choked up a bit, not too much, though.
The woman called her daughter, and then they took off.

Before
they left, she walked to me, held up her hand, and then when I raised
up mine.. she gave me a high five and a smile to die for. And then
she and her mother exited... leaving me with a total sense of awe...
if she could do it... so could I. And I would, too.

Sam
said the girl's name was Amy, and that she'd been born without legs
past her thighs, and how she'd been fitted with a little flat cart
with wheels on it before getting her prosthetics. Alex had procured
funding from a charitable organization to pay for her prosthetics, in
full.

Alex,
I soon learned was the owner of the shop. He called Sam's name, but
Sam said for me to go first, that he wasn't in any hurry, and that he
wanted to show me something before Dad and I left.

With
that, Alex led us down a long corridor to a room at the end.

When
we were seated, he entered some stuff into a computer, then turned to
me and asked, “So, what do you want to do, Adam?”

I
puffed out my chest, all the while remembering the little girl, and
Sam, “I want to walk.”

“How
bad do you want to walk?” Sam asked, intently.

“I
want to walk.”

He
told me to take off my jeans and shoe. I did so, without hesitation.

He
then took a bunch of measurements, paying particular attention to the
stump hanging off my hips, butt, and waist. Normally, before, I
would have been mortified – he took pictures from all angles,
reassuring me, all the while, that the evaluation had to be
comprehensive so that we knew the before and after states.

He
entered those numbers and uploaded the pictures into the computer.
He pressed some buttons... then, based on my sizes and whathaveyou,
several prosthetic devices displayed on the screen. He turned to me,
“Pick one. Any of these will fit you... as you can see, you
have many, many options available.”

I
looked to Dad, questioning which one I should choose. There were so
many, and I was conscious of the prices... although I didn't know
exactly 'how much' because the prices didn't show on the screen below
the pictures... I just knew they had to cost a lot of money.

Dad
undeterred, seeing my concern, said, “Pick any one of them...
there's plenty of money available to purchase any one or two of
them... the important thing is to get you up and around... on your
own... so that you can feel normal... Adam, I've been through this
with David... his life changed so much... and he had the same
concerns as do you... just roll with it.”

I
looked to the screen, and then pointed to the one in the bottom left
corner. I turned to Alex... I pointed out the one on the bottom left
side of the screen... it was a simple apparatus that I thought I
might be able to wear and use.

Alex
said, “Don't worry, Adam... that's just the frame of a really
nice model. We'll use the measurements and pictures to craft a
prosthetic that's customized for just you. Is this the one you
want?”

Once
again, I looked to Dad. He nodded, then turned to Alex, and said,
“Order it, Alex.” To me he said, “That one's just
like David ordered for his first one.”

I'd
seen it in his closet... I'd noticed the skin tones were very
similar, and that it even had hairs that I guessed matched him at the
time...

There
was no way they would spend that much money on me… but then
something drew me back… my thinking changed… my vision
changed… for a very brief second, maybe two, I saw, or thought
I saw Jesus’ smiling face looking at me… and he was
sticking his tongue out. And then, my penis twitched… I was
already having some difficulties…

Alex
touched the screen with purpose, and then entered some information...
some codes or something that I didn't understand.

Alex,
while I was looking for a price, instructed me to get dressed, that
he had but a couple of things left to enter before the order was
officially placed.

Knowing
that I wasn't going to get to see what the price tag was, I got up on
the gurney, grabbed my jeans, started to pull them on... I lost my
balance... Dad caught me before I could fall. Alex said amusingly,
“I'll teach you how to fall so that you don't hurt yourself.
We're not perfect, you know.”

With
that said, he raised up the hem of his dress slacks. He then knocked
on the leg, clearly showing me that it was a prosthetic... and it was
much like the one he'd showed me for me.

At
the same time, I looked up, and saw a cost showing on the screen. My
heart dropped. The price was listed as $31,275.00.

Old
thoughts took over... I wasn't worth THAT. There was NO WAY I was
going to let him pay THAT MUCH... not for a fucking leg.

Quickly,
I jerked on my pants, zipped them up, snapped the snap, and then sat
up on the edge of the bed.

Dad
said, strongly, “Stop it, Adam. Don't even go there. Alex,
order it. Adam, this is the beginning point. You've got to go
forward in this life or you're going to get trampled.”

“That's
too much money, sir.” I said, apologetically, resigned to the
fact that I didn't want him to pay 'that much'.

But
he countered in such a way that the conversation was finished, “Alex,
order the prosthetic. Get the boy mobile. Adam, this is final. As
your Dad, I make tough decisions, hopefully they are right... because
this one will affect not only now, but it will follow you throughout
your life. There's nothing more to discuss about this topic.”

Alex
regarded our interactions, with amusement. He said, “Your
Dad's right on the money, young man. I was about your age when I got
my first one... let me tell you what... it was the best thing I could
have ever done, and yes, my Dad gave me a hard time... he was right,
though. Now, I have two of these in stock... I'll be right back.
Don't go anywhere. Oh... okay... go ahead and take off your pants...
leave your underwear on... you'll soon see why... I'll be right
back.”

With
that, Alex was off to the storeroom.

I
got my pants off, then grabbed a sheet to cover up that which
designates me male... as “he” was letting me know of its
presence by standing up at attention. Dad smirked.

“Well...
I can't help it...” I stuttered and stumbled, innocently (ha
haa).

Alex
returned carrying a 'model'... it looked real, actually... I couldn't
believe it. I couldn't stop the grin that I felt from deep within...
at that moment, I knew that I had to go through with it. I mean –
fuck!

He
wrapped my stump with soft cotton material and padding. Next, he
laid the prosthesis on the gurney, and then fit it on over my stump.
He said, “This one has straps that go around your waist. Two
more go on your stump and attach to a fastening in back... these
provide some stability until you learn how to use it.”

With
that, he removed the sheet... I was going to get Jesus... that was
weird... was he causing my 'little problem', or what? I heard him
snickering way back in the background of my mind...

If
he saw my predicament, he didn't say anything. Instead, he worked
professionally and efficiently, and despite my little issue, I was
soon cinched up.

He
said, “Jim, why don’t you stand on one side of Adam…
we’re ready to get him up… I’ll support your other
side, Adam. Just do it slow and steady. It’s going to be a
little shorter than your other leg… that’s okay…
your prosthetic will fit perfectly.”

I
was afraid… when I put my left leg down... the sensation in
the stump was something totally brand new… and yes, it was
short, but not too much... maybe an inch, or so. But it was enough
to make me feel all wobbly.

They
both said I did great, though I didn’t think so… some of
the negative thinking once again nearly took control, but once again…
a smiling face of the one I loved became apparent in the forefront of
my mind.

Just
before leaving the shop, Alex said that the order would arrive by
Thursday morning. We made an appointment for fitting, and hopefully,
placement. He told me not to worry.

On
our way out, I stopped in at the restroom, drained the can, which was
difficult because of the 'little problem' that was still present.
Once I closed the door, flipped the lock into place, undid the zipper
and snap, pulled down the front of my underwear, stuck it toward the
toilet, pushed it down … and then it happened...

Whew...
holy cow! I didn't know a dude could hold that much inside of
himself...

Sam
wasn’t in the waiting room. Instead, he was outside leaning
against his bike, talking on his cell phone.

When
Dad pulled out his wallet and handed a credit card to Alex, I made my
way outside. I didn’t want to see them make the transaction.
Even though I was in the ‘system’, I still didn’t
want to see them exchange money.

Sam
looked up, smiled then motioned for me to come to him. He said some
“Love you's” into the phone then terminated the call, put
the device into his pocket, placed his hand on my shoulder, and then
showed me the intricacies of the fine ride. It was way kewl. He
then showed me a modified foot pedal like thing that permitted him to
easily change gears.

“Wanna
get on her?” Sam said intently, smiling.

Fuck
yeah I wanted to get on her!

With
his help to boost me onto her, I sat checking out all the controls,
and 'felt' the mighty power of the machine, without it even being in
motion, or running. He then handed me the keys... holy shit!

Don't
tell me twice.

I
inserted the key into the ignition, squeezed the handlebar grip
firmly toward the steel, and then fired her up. She died twice, but
then Sam showed me that I needed to give it some gas... holy crap –
she fired up with a roar. I pumped the gas a couple of times just to
hear its thunder, and then let off so that she would just idle.

Sam
said, “Why don't we ask your Dad to permit me to take you for a
spin around the block...”

Just
then Dad exited the building, saw me sitting on the ride, and then
about shit his pants when I roared the bike to life by giving it a
bit of gas.

Dad
hesitated for a moment, until I said, “Please... we won't be
gone long... like Sam said.”

He
surveyed Sam one more time before nodding, and saying, “Do
everything he says. I can't believe I'm giving you permission...
your Mom will have a hemorrhage... okay, go ahead. Lord.”

Sam
retrieved two helmets, one for him, one for me. It fit my head
perfectly.

Dad,
with a second thought, said to Sam, “He doesn't know how to
ride...”

Sam
replied, “Not to worry. My husband doesn't know how to ride,
either. Are you ready to go, young man?”

“You
have a husband?” I asked, incredulously.

“That
I do... is it a problem?”

“Oh,
no, sir. I have gay all around me... they're happy and
everything...” I looked at Dad, wondering... if I should share
my truth with a stranger... the look on his face was non-committal...
the ball was entirely in my court... with a coy smile, feeling
strength coming from within, knowing I had a safety net, I added, “Me
too. I'm gay... you're the first person to know... outside of my
family, I mean.”

“Well
Son, I'm proud of you... Are you ready to go...?” When I
scooted back, he mounted, revved the engine up to a couple of grand,
causing reverberations to sound throughout the block, surely. I put
my arms around his waist, snuggled in, and said, “Okay... I'm
ready.” To Dad, I yelled hella loud over the powerful engine,
“Thank you!”

He
nodded.

With
that, Sam roared the bike to life, and off we went. The first place
we took off to was the -freeway-. He opened it up to highway speeds,
and a little beyond that, I was sure. The combined effects of wind
blowing through my helmet, up my legs, and through my shirt, the
vibrations from the very heavily muscled bike reverberating
throughout my entire body... well, the experience was a total,
complete and absolute fucking total blast. I mean it! If I wouldn't
have just creamed... I would have on that ride.

Soon,
too soon, he took an exit ramp, returned to the shop via city
streets, and then both he and Dad helped me dismount. To Dad, I
exclaimed, “Holy shit! What a rush!”

I
was a bit wobbly, but soon regained equilibrium enough to stand on my
own.

Sam
dismounted, set the kickstand, ruffled my hair and followed Alex into
the shop after reassuring me that we'd soon meet again.

Our
next appointment was the CPS office. At first, as soon as I saw the
sign, I tensed up, wondering if maybe I'd be dropped off and left
there, but then remembered that they'd asked me if I wanted to become
a member of their family... I relaxed, realizing my fears were
unfounded.

Ella
was a kewl person, one of the best I'd ever seen or had dealings
with. Most of the previous visits, to other caseworkers, were all
sterile, starched, and was where the adults talked about this and
that, never asking me once asking me what I thought or felt about
whatever was going on.

I
smiled, and the smile felt like it came from deep inside, “Jim
and Peggy, well, they asked me to join their family... I said yes. I
want to join their family. And, I'm getting a leg. Hopefully I can
walk, soon. And, oh yeah, I got to ride a motorcycle today! It was
a total blast!”

Ella's
eyes narrowed to slits. She looked to Jim with a hard look on her
face, and in her eyes. Immediately, I got scared shitless... like
I'd fucked up... just like I'd fucked up before...

“He
rode a motorcycle?” Ella hissed between clenched teeth.

Dad,
quick to respond, said, “He didn't actually DRIVE a
motorcycle... he rode with an experienced driver, and yes, he wore a
helmet. Come on, Ella, I'd never put him in danger... you know
that.”

Ella
relaxed, noticeably. Still, she was upset. I could tell that she
was tense, and not at all convinced that I'd not been put into mortal
danger. Hell, it had been a blast! At no time did I feel afraid.

Ella
thought for a moment, before saying, “Jim, I don't want Adam on
a motorcycle until after the adoption is final. I could lose my job
if I knowingly put one of the kids in danger.” To me she
continued, “Adam, I do not want you on a motorcycle until
everything is finalized. I say this for your general welfare... I
must insist.”

“Why
are you so afraid? I don't understand. I didn't feel like I was in
danger, at any time. Sam was at the shop for the same reason I was
there... he overcame his fear... and he showed me that I could and
can, too.”

Ella
looked down to her desk. She then reached for and retrieved two
pictures sitting on her desk, facing her. She said, “This is
why...”

She
then turned the pictures to face me. One was a guy, who was maybe 16
or 17 years old. The other was a mangled motorcycle, tore up to
smithereens. She said cautiously, sadly, “That's my Son, and
that's his Dad's motorcycle, or what's left of it. They were both
killed riding up the road leading into the mountains... that day, and
they were so very close, they were heading up to spend the weekend
camping, fishing, climbing, and enjoying life... they never came
home. They died instantly.”

She
turned to Dad, “Have you retained counsel for this proceeding?
I'll need paperwork to make this go through...”

“I'm
sorry, Ella. I didn't know.”

“Now
you do. If you'll excuse me, I have a court appointment.” To
me she said, “Adam, we have some work to do... unfortunately,
Massachusetts is holding back on releasing you fully into our care
and custody. I'm not sure why they are doing it... they are only
saying there are a couple of outstanding warrants. I'm working on
getting to the bottom of it. We'll get past it, but it's just going
to take some time. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go.”

…

On
the way to the limo, Dad asked, conversationally, “Do you know
what's going on back in Mass?”

“Uhm...
maybe...” I replied, hesitatingly. I didn't really want him
to know 'everything' about me, what I had to do to... you know... to
survive.

“Maybe?”
He asked for clarification, patting my back as we walked along the
sidewalk skirting a courthouse appearing building.

I
stopped to take a rest. Sometimes when I was really walking fast on
the crutches, my arm pits felt like they were being rubbed raw.
Sometimes, my fingers tingled. Somebody, not a doctor, one day, told
me that I was likely rubbing some nerves, that I should walk with
them only slightly brushing the pits, and to not rest my weight on
them.

When
I didn't immediately answer, I didn't know what to say, or how to
answer his question. Dad didn't say anything, instead he patiently
waited.

I
drew in a deep breath, exhaled, and said, “Uhm, well, I was a
street whore, but I didn't have sex... well, I mean, no, I didn't
have sex... what my friend Larry and I did was to hook up with a
trick, and then steal their money and run. Most of the time we got
by with it... I guess there are a couple of things that went wrong...
can it wait until we get in the car?”

“Yes,
of course it can. Are you ready, or do you need to rest some more?
I can have the driver come to us...”

“No...
that's okay. I'm ready now.”

We
walked to the crosswalk, waited for the light to change so that we
could safely make passage to the other side of the street. On the
corner I noticed an ice cream shop. Dad smiled, shrugged his
shoulders, and then pulled out his phone, made a quick call, hung up,
patted my back, and then led us to the Ice Cream Palace, a novelty
shop serving exotic frozen treats.

Dad
carried the containers to a table at the far back side of the
store... We were the only customers. Dad looked at me inquisitively,
obviously waiting for me to continue where I'd left off.

I
looked into his eyes, looking for some indication that he was angry.
I saw none. I did see that he was interested in what I had to say.
“No pressure.” Dad eventually said when I remained
quiet.

“I
swear... most of the time all we had to do was undress.. you know...
our shirts... and pants... and sometimes, when the john really
insisted... I took off my underwear... but just for a minute until he
started to, you know, I mean... we didn't have sex... sometimes I was
hard, sometimes not... we played hard, Dad. Sometimes Larry would
jack off in front of the dude... sometimes I'd rub mine... sheesh,
this is hard, Dad.”

Dad
didn't say anything, instead he was listening to me... like nobody
else had done in my old life. Assured and reassured, I continued,
“Uhm... sometimes the john wanted to touch us... I wouldn't let
them touch my privates... Larry helped me out there by offering
himself... and well, here's where it gets tricky... when the john
would go into the bathroom... we'd hurry up and get dressed, then
we'd snatch his wallet, and run like hell.

The
last one... he was weird... he wouldn't get undressed... we just
stood there waiting for the other to act first... finally, Larry
began rubbing the front of his pants, or shorts, whatever... he got
hard... and well, that was when we got busted. The guy was a vice
cop... anyway... we booked it... I can't believe we got away... when
you're scared...”

Dad
nodded.

“Well,
okay, I did it two more times, no, three times... I had no money, and
no way to get any. I was cold, Dad. It was fall and everything...”

He
nodded again, put his hand on mine... thus reassuring me to continue.

“We
made a deal... twenty five bucks to 'see'. Fifty for me to... uhm...
jack off... and, well, a hundred to go from there... whatever we
decided at the time... we went to a seedy motel... I was, well, I
was... anyway, I was in the mood to play... he was a good looking
guy... I mean, well you know... I undressed... everything, I mean...
you know... I laid on the bed, stroked it a little bit... I was
already hard and stuff... it went from okay to bad in a heart beat...
I heard the clink as he put his hand on in the back of his hands... I
thought he was some kind of freak... until he pulled out his cop
card... and a pair of handcuffs. He wasn't a real big guy...
somehow, I leaped to him, knocked him to the floor, and then I
grabbed my pants and ran out the door with him chasing me. The
elevator was open... nobody was on it... I just barely got the button
pushed... and well, the door closed... quickly, I got dressed on the
way down, and was snapping them up when the door opened...”

“When
I got outside, there were cops all over the damn place. I ran for
it, hid out for a couple of days without eating or anything. I lived
in a dumpster, I tried to garbage but couldn't make myself... I was
too afraid to leave … it was my bathroom, too. That was
gross.”

Dad
started to say something, but I needed to continue... I needed to get
it all out... “Uhm, I'm not finished... anyway, I got where I
had to eat... and drink, too... so I took a chance... I headed to a
convenience store that I knew had no security cameras and all that
stuff... I'd been there before, both with and without money... you
know... anyway, I walk in, and there was Arnie. Arnie was a guy who
had lived in the group home, too, but he had escaped, like me. I saw
that he was loaded... you know, his pant pockets were filled... he
left... so I loaded up... and then ran (I pointed to my crutches to
emphasize just how 'fast' I could run) when a cop came in. Anyway, I
got busted big time... but, you see, I'd escaped custody before...
and I did it again... here I am... you know the rest...”

“It
sounds as if you were doing what you needed to do, Adam. I don't
condone what you did, but I have a bigger problem with men taking you
to a hotel room assuming that they can have sex with you. On the
other hand, two wrongs don't make a right... but I understand your
thinking.”

“Dad,
I have one more thing... I went back to the home... I was
desperate... it was freezing cold... I had no choices left.”

“So
what happened next?”

“Asshole
greeted me in... uhm... well, I agreed to his terms. I didn't want
to go to juvenile... not in the city of Boston, anyway. That's a bad
place to be... and well, since I was homeless, and there wasn't a
chance in hell that I'd get picked out of the lineup... I agreed to
him doing anything he wanted... I was freezing... anyway, he let me
in. I went to my old room... he said I could stay there again... it
had 3 guys in it... and well... they were busy... so I left... I got
into the shower... it felt good, really good... I was so damn
cold...”

Dad
patted my hand, then he took hold of it, and passed strength into
me... I felt it flow... right to my heart. I continued, “My
clothes were filth... I'd finally felt clean... the guys in my old
room were finished by the time I got back there... they made all
kinds of comments about my... uhm, my leg, and well they made some
serious fun about my thing, too. Anyway, asshole came looking for
me... I was supposed to meet him in his room... he grabbed my hair...
but it was wet so I slipped away from his hold... I wasn't in the
mood to fight him... so, naked, I went to his room... he followed me
in, closed the door... and well, to make a long story short... he got
undressed, pushed me onto the bed, made me lift up my legs... if I
would have had a knife... I decided he wasn't going to do it to me...
not like he'd done to the other kids... so I let him get in position,
and then just as he was right above my back door... I kicked the
living shit out of him. He went down. I grabbed his pants and shirt
and tore out of there as fast as I could go... the only thing that
saved my ass was when he fell down the stairs... it dazed him...
somebody threw me my clothes... I put them on while asshole was
figuring out where he was and what the fuck happened. I never looked
back. I can think of 3 things that may be holding me up... but I
doubt that asshole filed a report, if you know what I mean.”

“So
what did you do next? It's cold...”

“I
went to a youth ministry outreach thing... they let me stay there for
about 4 months... but then they changed the rules... you had to be
sponsored by an adult... and well, that's when those idiots took me
in for the welfare money, and then they ran after he got into some
trouble with the law. I don't know what he did... but we ended up
here in Hawaii. Like I said, you know the rest. Ella seems nice,
though, although she was pissed today. I didn't mean to...”

“No,
she wasn't pissed. She was scared. Bad memories came back to her.
Her ex-husband and son were killed right about the time when Jeremy
came to live with us on a permanent basis.”

“He's
adopted?” I asked...

“Yes.
He was a little one. David was our natural born child. I'm telling
you that Angel, Allen, Andy, Peter and Matt... Well, they are just
like my real born children... while I didn't father them in the
conventional way, I am their Daddy. I'm proud of each and every one
of my sons. I don't think you did anything inherently wrong....
though I stealing is not the right way to go... at the same time, I
know there are situations and circumstances that require theft in
order to survive. Talk to Andy, Matt and Peter, and I mean really
talk to them... do some heart talk, okay?”

“You
mean you don't hate me for tricking...?”

“Nope.
Even if you would have been required to have sex, I'd still love
you... I'm glad you didn't have to do it, really I am... You got
lucky, you know... any one of those men could have … really
harmed you. Will you, can you give me the name of the group home
'asshole' as you call him? I'm going to do some checking up... he's
a piece of scum.”

“That's
no problem... his name is Harley Jenson, James, something like
that...”

Dad's
face went ghost white. He swallowed hard. With a lump of coal
clearly in his voice, he said, “Could it be Jamison?”

“Yeah...
that's it. Mostly, we called him Asshole, even to his fat fucking
face.”

Dad
gathered his wits back about him... I had no idea why he was so
upset... I only knew that he WAS upset.

“Adam,
what I am about to tell you will likely upset you... just trust
me... this is very important... normally, I do not tell my sons'
stories for them... just to confirm... would you describe that man?”

“You
mean – other than being an asshole?”

Jim
noticeably relaxed. He said, “If we are talking about the same
man... then asshole is giving him a lot of credit. Was there
anything you noticed about him that stands out?”

He
waited for me to say something, anything. The look on his face was
intense... I could see a lot of emotions welling up inside him... yet
he remained calm, at least on the outside. He put his hand on my
shoulder, squeezed lightly, and then added, “Son, I understand
you’re scared… you had a reason to be frightened, but
not now… this is a new life for you. You’ll never have
to go back there… unless you choose to. And even if you chose
to … you’d have an army on your butt… they would
likely, if I know my boys, and I do, so I can say with all
probability that they will hog tie you to the pool house door to keep
you here with us.”

I
took in a deep breath… “He always has a stinking cigar
sticking out of his mouth. He was a fucking slob. Black hair.
Steel gray eyes. Bushy eyebrows. Zits... he must have had them
bad... his face looked like a fucking dart board.”

“Was
there anything else about him that would stand out?”

“Uhm...
well, he had a fat old ugly… uhm… dick... his gives the
word ugly a whole new meaning... not even I'm that...” I said,
and then stopped myself before I said the word that I was finding was
not true… Jesus loves me just the way I am.

Dad
contemplated for a moment before raising his eyes to look deep into
my soul. The energy passing through us was totally powerful…
even Dad blinked, obviously surprised. “Adam, Son, the man you
are describing is in prison for the rest of his natural life. Andy,
Matt and Peter have had dealings with him... he's their uncle, or
was. Do you know anything else out of the ordinary about him or the
other asshole? Again, getting all the information is so very
important.”

“Yeah,
they were always taking pictures of us... they always had a fucking
camera... usually it was only their cell phones... but if we went on
a picnic... yeah, we went on them once in a while... they took
regular cameras... you know... the digital ones. They were hella
expensive looking.”

“I
have to ask you this, Adam... I don't want to... but I need to... <I
nodded>. Do you know if they took pictures of you and the other
boys while you were taking showers, or when you were having private
moments... like going the bathroom... or taking care of your male
needs?”

“I
don't think so. Why?”

“I
just needed to ask you that question. I have my reasons. Like I
said, we are very familiar with him... he gave... Peter, Matt and
Andy more than an uncle should have given...”

“You're
shitting me. No way.”

He
looked at me in a way that I just knew he wasn't kidding around. I
continued by asking, “Did he do sex things? You know... uhm...
he didn't do that to them, did he?”

“I'm
afraid so, Adam. It took a very long time for them to get over it...
and they aren't exactly there, yet, but they're working hard to get
all the way past it... some of it, I'm sure, will follow them around
for the rest of their lives.”

“I
didn't know... I'm sorry... if I said or did anything that might have
...”

“Adam,
I'm just so very glad that you weren't hurt... any worse than you
were... talk to them... I'm sure they will tell you... every time
they tell their stories... they seem to get a little bit better. Is
there anything else you need to tell me, right now...?”

“No.
I've told you the truth... I swear.”

“I
know, Son. I know.”

With
that confirmed, he pulled out his cell phone, made a call, saying,
“We're ready.” Then he clicked the phone silent.

Amazed,
I asked, “You didn't tell them where we are...”

Dad
smiled, “They already know.”

We
got up, walked out, went to the curb... within seconds a long stretch
limo arrived. A man exited the vehicle, walked around, opened the
rear passenger door, stood at attention, and then waited expectantly.

At
the same time, I noticed another vehicle pull up behind the limo.
The man exiting the black cop car (I knew what to look for), was none
other than Fugi. Man, he follows us around...

Dad
asked me to wait for him in the limo, and said that he needed to talk
with Fugi for a few minutes... before we parted, he said, “Adam,
I'm going to have Fugi look into the situation at the group home...
it's not right for those kids to be there... you have a new life...
now it's their turn.”

***
To be continued

Author's
note: If you are interested in learning about whom the 'celestial
body' was who brought Adam back from the brink of disaster, then I
highly suggest that you go read Memories Parts 1 and 2 here: AC's
Corner Cafe, or here Sir
Castle Roland. ACFan paints a beautiful picture of two boys who
have, undoubtedly, made major differences in young people's lives,
both here on your screen, and in real life.

I'm
forever grateful to the many authors over at the Cafe. They provided
me with most of my motivation to even pick up a keyboard.

My
editor, Darryl, invested a whole lot of time editing their stories.
I'm very honored and privileged to have him in my camp. Thank you,
sir.

Let
me just say that Joe is correct that there are indeed some wonderful
stories on the two sites he mentioned. I highly recommend reading the
stories he mentioned along with a huge number of other stories
related to what we call, the CSU also known as Clan Short Universe.

I
am very glad to be editing for Joe, and I am very glad he allowed me
to be a part of his wonderful stories,

Now
to get down to business, I am so glad to see that Adam and Jesus
have bonded. That can only be a good thing. Now that the bonding has
happened, Adam can heal and begin a new and wonderful life. I can
hardly wait for the next chapter of this wonderful story.