Top 10 water attractions in Las Vegas

Summer in Vegas isn’t just hot, it’s “I feel like I’ve been marinated, charbroiled and left to shrivel up into an atrophied shell of a human … but I’m also doing shots of tequila off this sweaty stranger’s chest so I’d sort of like to see this through” hot.

If you visit during the summer months, there’s a probability higher than the thermodynamic temperature scale that you’ll soon be walking around in a dehydrated stupor looking for water. These 10 top water attractions in Las Vegas will help you on your sticky quest.

P.S. Yes, we have water in the desert.

P.P.S. No, you don’t have to suck it out of a cactus.

1. Bellagio Fountains

The world-famous Fountains of Bellagio shoot a dazzling display of 17,000 gallons of water 24 stories into the air from a 375,00-square-foot lake that could fill 2,000 swimming pools. Your suggested daily intake of eight cups a day seems like a drop in comparison.

2. Water Shows

If you like being near the water, but you don’t want to get wet, then leave it to the French-Canadian acrobats in Cirque du Soleil’s “O” (a play on the French word for water) or“Le Rêve – The Dream.” Both shows take place around and in a huge pool of water. You may even see a breast-stroke or two.

3. Pools and Pool Clubs

Whether splashing around in your hotel pool or falling drunkenly into the deep end at a pool party/dayclub, you’re sure to make waves this summer.

4. Shark Reef

This little guy really wants to inject you with his venomous saliva, but you can rest assured he is a gentleman and will be on his best behavior. He is one of three Komodo dragons who live among the 2,000 daring and dangerous animals, including several species of sharks, exotic fish, a 300-pound sea turtle and more in Shark Reef at Mandalay Bay.

5. Gondolas

You’re in Vegas. So it makes total sense to pretend you’re in Venice. You probably don’t have enough time to become fluent in Italian, but you could take a romantic gondola ride at The Venetian or hop on the gondolas at Lake Las Vegas.

7. Fishing at Floyd Lamb Park

Located about 20 miles from the Strip,Floyd Lamb Park is a Pleistocene paleontologic site (say that three times fast) with thousands of years of history. Those with a Nevada fishing license can reel in rainbow trout in the park’s ponds (three fish per person limit).

8. Rafting on the Colorado River

Although Lake Mead on the Colorado River has not reached its natural capacity in years due to droughts, there is still enough water for you to dive into a raft tour.

9. Aquariums

For everyone who ever wanted to be a mermaid or be with a mermaid, theSilverton Aquariumwill make your fishy fantasy come true (for the most part). Women dressed like mermaids float among the 4000-plus exotic fish. They can even serve as the maid of honor in your underwater wedding. The Mirage lobby and The Forum Shops at Caesars also have extensive aquariums.

10. Lake Mead Cruises

TheDesert Princess is a three-story, Mississippi paddle-wheel boat offering Champagne brunches, dinner cruises and sightseeing tours on Lake Mead. It’s not exactly a booze cruise, but there is indeed booze on this cruise. So much so that I actually drunk-texted my boss while on the dinner cruise. Note to self: Next time, leave your phone in the car.