Not going to lie, I love the idea of this “Players Weekend” in late August.

As you probably have heard by now, a negotiated deal between the MLB and the MLB Players Association will allow players to add personal touches to their uniforms. They’ll be allowed to put nicknames on the backs of their jerseys instead of just last names. They’ll be able to change the colors on their spikes, batting gloves, wristbands, catchers masks and compression sleeves. And they’ll be able to wear patches on their uniform with the name of an influential person or organization. It’s such a great idea.

There are, of course, common-sense restrictions. Nothing offensive. Nothing that impacts how the game is played (no white sleeves on pitchers, for example, that might hinder the batter’s ability to see the baseball) or officiated.

So now, of course, the question is this: What will the players do? How will they celebrate this newfound freedom weekend? Of course, we fully expect those guys who are known by shortened names to have those on their backs. Like MadBum for Madison Bumgarner,, Miggy for Miguel Cabrera, CarGo for Carlos Gonzalez, Tulo for Troy Tulowitzki, Goldy for Paul Goldschmidt, Duffman for Matt Duffy and on and on.

But what about nicknames? We have some ideas. First, this is an XFL-inspired given …

If they really let MLB players put nicknames on jerseys for a weekend and no one goes with "HE HATE ME," I'm finding a new sport to watch.

And if we don’t see these nicknames on the backs of jerseys, we’re going to be awfully disappointed. (All nicknames from the players' Baseball-Reference pages, btw.)

25. “The Kraken” for Gary Sanchez
24. “Condor” for Chris Sale
23. “Wild Horse” for Yasiel Puig
22. “Bringer of Rain” for Josh Donaldson
21. “Baby Giraffe” for Brandon Belt
Need to know: All five of these would look amazing on the back of a jersey. Wouldn’t be right to have any announcer other than Vin Scully at the mic when the Wild Horse rattles off a couple multiple-homer, multiple-stolen base games, though. As for Belt, Giants TV announcer Duane Kuiper came up with the nickname, and the Giants fans loved it. Belt quickly bought in, too. I guess hoping that Belt will wear giraffe-pattern compression sleeves is too much, right?

20. “DatDude” for Brandon Phillips
19. “Crush” for Chris Davis, “Khrush” for Khris Davis
18. “Millville Meteor” for Mike Trout. He’d be No. 1 if he went with GOAT
17. “Stink” for Rougned Odor
16. “Captain Underpants” for Hunter Pence
Need to know: Mike Trout would be No. 1 if he went with “GOAT” on the back instead of his actual nickname. Same with Clayton Kershaw. Great jersey name simplicity in Crush and Khrush. Even if you didn’t know Hunter Pence was connected to the nickname “Captain Underpants” he’d probably be on your short list of guesses for players with that nickname, right?

Great tattoo, great nickname for James Paxton. (Getty Images)

15. “Sparkles” for Kris Bryant
14. “El Coffee” for Gregory Polanco
13. “Moose” for Mike Moustakas
12. “Big Maple” for James Paxton
11. “Dr. Smooth” for Michael Brantley
Need to know: Paxton’s nickname would be awesome enough just because he’s from Canada, eh? It’s even more perfect because he has a big maple leaf tattoo on his right arm. Dr. Smooth is a much cooler nickname than you or I will ever have. And Bryant pretty much would have to walk up to the plate to that song from "Frozen," right?

10. “Joey Bats” for Joey Bautista
9. “El Oso Blanco” for Evan Gattis
8. “Obi Yan” for Yan Gomes
7. “The Machine” for Albert Pujols
6. “Scrabble” for Mark Rzepczynski
Need to know: Just some all-time nicknames at this level. Joey Bats is both a great nickname and a great Twitter handle. Scrabble is perfect for that last name (though “Words With Friends” might be more culturally relevant). Any name that was the theme of a classic ESPN commercial makes the top 10, so Pujols’ The Machine is an easy choice.

5. “Gigante” for Jose Altuve
4. “Tsunami” for Carlos Martinez
3. “Thor” for Noah Syndergaard
2. “Big Sexy” for Bartolo Colon
1. “The Final Boss” for Seung-hwan Oh.
Need to know: Because, you know, Altuve’s talent is giant even if his body isn’t. Thor is a no-brainer for the top-five. So is Big Sexy. And how can you possibly have a better nickname for a closer than The Final Boss? Well, you can’t. And Oh’s other nickname, The Stone Buddha, is pretty amazing, too.