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Monday, November 14, 2011

Sunday frustrations

I really think we underestimate just how comforting routine is for our children.

D's mother slept over on Saturday night and so got up with the kids at the crack of dawn on Sunday morning.

They told her they're "very very hungry" and "want to eat Weetbix" so she fed them at 7 am.

Which, of course threw out the whole thing. They were ready for their snack at 10 instead of 11 at church.

The kids have a new thing - I'm now wondering whether the photo shoot last week was just the start of it and it just happened to be coincidence that it happened last week.

They want nothing to do with me when D's there but are normal when he's not. Hmmm.

I'm used to Kendra spurning me for her father but not Connor. But now, from Connor, "no Mummy, Daddy do _______"

Of course it's fine when I want to get other things done (cooking, cleaning, organising) but when we need to get them ready for church, they don't want me to change their nappies, dress them, etc.

Very frustrating and of course, sad!

Thank GOODNESS for Jess's post because her little Mellow also wants no-one but Daddy so that made me feel better about Connor.

Anyway, Kendra is still wetting herself regularly. I go in every night at 11 - 12 to change her nappy so all the bedding doesn't have to be laundered but in the mornings sometimes she still needs another bath.

isn't she gorgeous?!

And on Sunday, she was not having me do the bath!

There was a LOT of crying and me not budging and D stepping in and me screaming at him.

Just lovely.

Am I the only one or do Sundays before church go like this at your place too?

Church was fine, the kids were okay but D was not. Got sicker and sicker so I drove home and then he went to sleep for about 3 hours while the kids drove me nuts. On the bright side, we were able to have some reading time together on the couch.

I tried to cook (my usual Sunday afternoon thing) and it was a disaster.

It is impossible with children underfoot.

It also didn't help that the recipe didn't turn out great - I had to jazz it up with a nice creamy sauce. We are having it tonight so I'll let you know how that goes but it's not a keeper.

I have to remain in the kitchen while I cook otherwise the food burns :) so this is my opportunity to make shopping lists, menus, organise cupboards, etc.

So tomorrow I am giving both V and Nester a good talking-to. It's not like I chop and change things in the house all the time so they can't remember. My systems have been in place forever.

Fixing all this in the house means I can't get on with things and do the things I really have to do, like cook!

Very frustrating.

Do you also have things in the house that seemingly only you can do?Anybody else's kids "off" them?

PS Shame, my MIL did some dishes for us but she thinks she can see and she can't so I end up throwing all her "clean" dishes back in the sink (that's right, we don't have a dishwasher) to be re-washed.

14 comments:

I just laughed at your little list of 4. My house would drive you crazy! There are so many things around here that drive me crazy, but I just don't have the time and patience to change them. Good luck!

Don't get me started on Sundays...and in our house I AM THE ONLY PERSON WHO EVER SITS DOWN AND THEN GLANCES TO MY LEFT TO SEE THE EMPTY TOILET ROLL. Excuse the capital letters.Boytjie has always been "daddy must do it". I'm bargaining on his sister being "Mommy must do it". Hah. We'll see.

Your kids are so normal. When my oldest daughter started kindergarten, and I took her to class, she said "Don't tell anybody your my mom". Really hurt my feelings, but after 20 years or so, I got over it. Kids like to push your buttons. It is part of their growing independence.

Try not to get your feelings hurt over the kiddos' "preferences"...it's just a phase. I hear my mommy friends talking about it all the time.

And yes, there are plenty of things that only I can do, apparently. :) Occasionally I can relax enough and let Hubby fold towels, for example...but often I find myself going behind him to "straighten"...they don't fit in the drawer unless you do it just right! :)

Sundays before church are a complete nightmare no matter how well organised we are the night before. But, it does get easier once they can dress themselves etc.My kids don't spurn me but they do spurn their Dad and yet, when I'm not home then they are all BFF's. I think that they are just showing off. But, Lance is SUPER STRICT with them so maybe they are just looking for the nurturing and the babying that they get from me? Who knows with these kids. They are in a league of their own. And btw...I am not implying that you don't nurture so please don't misunderstand me.xxLOL....I did laugh at you redoing the dishes that MIL did. I can just picture you doing that.Um...and you are not alone when it comes to packing stuff away in your house. I was under the impression that it was a boy/male thing but clearly it isn't. Drives me nuts!

Hahahaha! Everything in my house is things that only I can do. ;-) And if I try to do anything useful while Nicola is still awake, everything in my house is things that only I can do over and over again.

Nicola has just this week gone off me and keeps asking for my mom. Drives me batty quite frankly. I feel a bit stupid for feeling jealous of that, but I still am. Last night when she woke up performing a tantrum and screaming at me for "Ouma!" I had actually just about had enough of it. I told her Ouma is NOT HERE, I am your only choice and I won't come unless you stop calling for Ouma...and then left her to it for a few minutes. (The alternative was calling Ouma at midnight to come over, just imagine that!).

This morning she's all sunshine and kisses again, and calling for me for whatever she wants. It's a phase I guess? *shrug* Maybe she calls for my mom because I'm the strict one and my mom lets her get away with murder. I'm actually in half a mind letting them loose on each other for an overnight visit so they can both learn some consequences.

You'll have to excuse my rant. I am wearing the cranky pants today since I've had only about 5 hours sleep over the last two days with Nicola being sick...and then she calls for Ouma, like I'm not good enough or something.

I am the first to say that routines are essential - when the girls were babies I followed their routine to about the minute but as they get older we are more and more flexible. The basics are right - they eat well, they sleep from just after 7pm till 7am every night which is pretty good and I can't ask for more. The thing that I like is that they will do that anywhere - if we go to friends for the evening they'll go to sleep on any bed or mattress, they will sleep at my folks (or nap there if we happen to be there or wherever at nap time)and are happy to eat supper and bath at my folks and then come home to sleep every Tuesday evening. We can bath first and eat supper later if they've been swimming or we go to the beach or we're going out or whatever. Chris especially likes to be spontaneous, we want to go out, go away, socialise and have fun as a family but it's important that the kids still sleep well. Not everything in life always goes according to plan and so I think it's important to help kids deal with change (once they know what 'normal' is). Sometimes the whole routine gets shifted a bit, for example on a Monday when Chris gets home late (usually at 7pm), everything is about 15 minutes later so he can still read them a story and cuddle with them a bit.Think I probably misunderstood but if my kids say they're hungry then I give them food, no matter what the time (food obviously, not snacks).I eat when I'm hungry and so I let them do the same. Thankfully my girls now play very nicely together and can be occupied for ages reading stories, playing 'mommy', playing outside or drawing pictures. If I really have to do something and they're wanting to be with me then the biggest treat I can give them is to allow them to watch Ceebeebies for a little while and I get my things done. They also love to help with the cooking and baking so I usually give them a job to do. It's also amazing how much more they eat when they've helped make the food. We have a veggie garden and they love going to pick/cut the veggies, washing them and then they gobble it all up (sometimes I cheat and tell them the spinach or whatever is from the garden when it isn't as I know they'll eat more of it).In our house I'm the one Ava wants if we're both around. (Zoe doesn't mind)It makes no sense to me as she's got me all day.If I'm not around she's happy with Chris.

Shame M, your Sat evening sounded a bit hectic! I know all about MIL probs, remind me to tell u all about her one day.

And yes, the J & J bedtime aqueous is no good, it gave my kids a rash, so never used it again.

And yes, there are many things in our house that I can only do, cause I am the only one who can do it properly! The V & Nester saga sounds very familiar, I have the same probs with mine. Did they get their "talking to"?

We went through a period where they would only tolerate Husband changing them, bathing them, and fixing their booboos. It was infuriating. Now they're back on me and it's just as infuriating. We can never win, right?