When Porny’s life was over

Have you seen the Jennifer Hudson-Jessica Simpson Weight Watchers commercial? Does it feel like it’s been on a lot lately? The more it’s on, the more I obsess about whether or not they were actually together. They totally weren’t together. Look at how awkward that is -- when they meet on the corner and awkwardly nod, say nothing, and then walk inside. There is no way that was shot on the same day. And if it was, well, someone should tell Weight Watchers that women do actually speak to one another.

As for Jessica -- apparently she gave an exclusive interview to Entertainment Tonight airing tonight about her second pregnancy and her “weight confession”. Here’s what Porny said in a clip that was aired last night to promote the interview:

“I looked at the scale and I thought my life was completely over.”

Well, sh-t Jessica, thanks for that message. And you too Weight Watchers, since it’s coming directly from your spokesperson. Because here’s what I’m taking away from that statement:

Your life is worthless when you put on weight. You are worthless when you put on weight.

Thanks! I’ll just go back to reading Vogue. It’s the same message with better clothes.