Do you ever think that there's a day when suddenly you aren't a stranger? To the sky, to the world, to people, to a place, to work, to nature, to conversation, to God, to yourself. This last two weeks have been a test of that. How much of a stranger am I to all of these things?"Once I was a stranger to the sky"

Our volunteers (vollies) arrived on Tuesday 9th and then our Work Week guests arrived on Saturday 13th. After spending all of staff training with just the 20 or so residents, this was an overload of people. 25 extra staff members and 22 extra guests joined us to live and work in community, so within a week we had over tripled in numbers and suddenly we, as residents, had become the minority. Odd feeling. "Cause one day comes when you must face yourself" This sudden amount of people made me face myself. This may make no sense to begin with, but I shall try to explain how... When you have to work 12/13 hours a day to get the work done that needs done; to cover days off, to organise and oversea the work week jobs being done, to look after 4 vollies in a kitchen you aren't familiar with, to open two centres for guests, to go to services, to do the orders, to go to meals, to build community and get to know those around you; you have to learn to take time to yourself wherever and whenever you can. In your office (until the phone rings or someone comes in), in your room, in services, in your home space (shared with 6 others), in the small time gaps you have to go walking... What do you do with these times to use them to best suit you and your needs? "Tried to be content with what was mine"

I found this challenge tough, but I found it useful. The hardest thing about all of this for me was that time with friends was less than normal and less than I would have liked. My friends here are amazing and I wouldn't have them any other way, so not getting much time with them has been very strange for me. But I've also realised that if I want to appreciate them and have the best relationship I can with them, then I need to have space for myself also or I will be tired, worn out and probably not the best company. A hard lesson to learn, but one that is invaluable. "Every angel has its time... I've come to claim what's mine" My friends are my angels, but I have to claim my own time too. This is a lot easier when those angels are always there and when they realise that you need your time and help you to keep to that. My time with them is more treasured this way, and treasured is how I like it. "I would never claim I've seen the light, but I heard the truest song tonight, whose tune can change you"

1 comment:

Beautiful words and sentiments Lorni. When I was walking El Camino there were times when I needed to be alone, but still surrounded by friends. Such a time is a great gift and a time to learn to know and be friends with yourself, and so you can have space for your friends again. Walking is also great for a rhythm for prayer. Bless you, and see you Saturday.