For the past few years I’ve been compiling a top things I learned list and we’re back by popular demand! This year I broke up my top forty list into four categories that I’m extremely passionate about and they all start with the letter M: muscle, manhood, marriage and money.

As you can see, I’m not ashamed or hesitant to share what I’m all about and I hope that my learning will be insightful for you.

Looking forward to your comments afterwards… which one stood out to you? What did you learn in 2010?

Top 10 Things I Learned About Muscle:

1.Muscle is built in spurts, it’s not a non-stop process. The best results come from “kicking the life” out of your body for 3-weeks and then taking an easy week before repeating the process. This formula can be repeated all year round.

2. My muscle building formula for success: Take massive action, analyze your results and readjust your approach until you get the results you want. Repeat.

3. My joints love me since I started mega dosing with fish oils. In fact, I recommend most people start with 20-30 grams of fish oil for the first 1-4 weeks to reduce inflammation and then bring your dosage down to 10-20 grams a day for maintenance.

4. Intermittent fast days, Sunday 6pm until Monday 6pm, at least 1-2 times a month has become a staple of my bodybuilding lifestyle. I’ve documented increased sleep quality, increased energy, no loss in muscle, a tighter midsection and greater appreciation for food.

5. Joel Marion’s 25-Day Extreme Fat Loss Diet is by far the most intense, aggressive and effective way to get super ripped in a short period of time. I recommend only using it once or twice a year though.

6. Extreme Rush from www.BlueStarNutritionals.com is officially my favorite pre workout supplement and has replaced my pre workout double espresso. The focus and intensity I get from this stuff has become addicting and I don’t like to train without it.

7. Hire a trainer, at least once in your life. Just recently I hired the toughest trainer at my gym that has been introducing me to 1-2 hour workouts at 110% intensity – I now drive to the gym in fear of what he has in store for me. Here’s how he greets me, “I’m kicking the piss out of you today.”

8. Creating “Team Del Monte” is helping me blow beyond my genetic potential, for a third time, as I’m climbing to 230 pounds for January 1st. I’ve hired a trainer, massage therapist, ART therapist and a personal nutrition coach (for the first time in my life). You don’t know what you don’t know and each piece of my team is contributing to greater improvement. I’ve found that to get to new levels, you probably won’t be able to do it alone.

9. Hot Yoga has become my new secret weapon. After 3-months of regular hot yoga (2-3x a week), I’m finally experiencing improved range of motion, flexibility, alignment, muscular endurance, isometric strength, faster recovery, muscle stability and muscle recruitment. The only thing I regret about hot yoga is not starting it 10 years ago.

10. There is no definitive answer to anything. Everyone is different and it’s your responsibility to figure out what works best for your body and what doesn’t. Text books and programs and coaches are only a starting point. You’ll only learn the truth about your body by taking action, documenting your results and readjusting your approach.

Top 10 Things I Learned About Manhood:

11. Character is more important than reputation. Character is who you are when no one is looking.

12. If you are good at something, let people find out on their own. No one appreciates the man who is always talking about his accomplishments. Also, while confidence is a good thing, being cocky is not. I’m still learning the difference 🙂

13. A man should aspire to be successful, but success should never come at the expense of others or at the expense of compromising one’s standards. I’ve been challenged with this being a young and very ambitious entrepreneur.

14. Don’t do life alone. Forming a band of brothers and coming along side each other in good times and bad times is what being a man is all about. Being a man your buddies can count on is one of the greatest satisfactions in the world.

15. Successful people study the lives of other successful people. Likewise, to obtain true masculinity, study the lives of real men. Please don’t emulate the lives of the guys from Jersey Shore. You were meant for way more.

16. A real man puts his family and friends first – before his technology. Blackberry’s and iPhones are not going to visit you at your funeral. (When Flavia and I go on date night, I no longer bring a 3rd wheel… i.e. my Blackberry. Guys… if you’re on a date with your lady… leave the phone at home… at least try it once 🙂 )

17. If you don’t stand for something then you’ll fall for everything. I learned this one from my pops.

18. A real man cares about his physical health and understands that improving his body benefits more than just himself- it inspires his friends, co workers, kids and ensures his wife keeps her hands where they should be – all over him 🙂

19. Your wife (or future wife) wants you to LEAD HER (at least I think most women want this). Step up and take charge and show that you’re a man with the plan. Take responsibility for the growth (or lack of growth) in your relationship.

20. Don’t expect people to just like you for who you are. Give them reasons to like you.

Top 10 Things I Learned About Marriage:

21. Marriage is like a full frontal mirror! Everything about you is exposed and you are given an awesome opportunity to address your issues. Try to view every issue as a way to grow and mature.

22. Don’t sweep any issues under the rug. Initially you can walk around them but eventually the rug will become so high that it’s going to get addressed. Avoiding issues is not better than addressing them right away.

23. Learn how to say, “I’m sorry Dear. I was wrong, you were right. Will you forgive me?” 🙂

24. It’s about “Team Del Monte,” not “Team Vince.” Working as partners, side by side is where it’s at.

25. Get ready to swallow your pride and remain humble, especially when arguing about silly things. Having a prideful heart will steer you right into a dead end, or a night on the couch!

26. If it bothers her, then listen up. Marriage has pushed me to be more sensitive and understanding of Flavia’s “buttons.” Even if it doesn’t make sense, I’m doing my best to respect my wife’s wishes.

27. Distance yourself from couples who complain about their spouses and have unhealthy relationships. Hang out with couples who are real, in love with each other and have a relationship that you look up to.

28. Continue to do life together. Flavia and I regularly go to the movies together, workout together, cook together and get dressed up for each other for “hot dates!” Basically we continue to do the same things that we did that lead us into marriage.

29. Communication is key! Always make time to talk about the day and what things were encountered, any new goals or disappointments.

30. Never use the word DIVORCE. No matter what, you always know you are in it FOREVER….the D word isn’t an option.

Top 10 Things I Learned About Money:

31. Weddings are not cheap! WOW! I highly recommend you don’t go into debt to pay for one.

32. The more people you serve the more you make.

33. It’s best to pay yourself first. I continue to set aside my “monthly saving goal” before I pay my bills. I don’t let my bills bully me around. I would rather collect a tad of interest rather than hit my personal saving goals.

34. Hang out with friends who make more money than you – if improving your financial situation is important to you. Hanging out with broke people will only lead you to becoming broke.

36. The more problems and the bigger problems you solve in the world, the more money you make. Focus on solving a big problem or even a small problem in the world and the moola will follow.

37. Money is a great tool to motivate you to take action. Dropping a few grand on my trainer has really inspired me to dial in my nutrition.

38. Hanging out with people who’s lives revolve around excess and more more more can be just as dangerous as hanging out with people who are broke.

39. Working harder and longer is not necessarily better but at some point of your success it’ll probably be necessary for a short period of time. If you only work harder and longer, you’re addicted to work.

40. Recognize you are blessed- whatever your current situation. There are tragedies all over the world and a good percentage of people are living in a hellish nightmare right now. Remember that everything you have is a gift from above and that it can be taken away just as quickly as it was given to you. Maximize and LIVE LARGE with what you have been given.

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I hope you enjoyed that…. My thoughts were a little heavier and deeper than last year. I have been doing that every year since 2006 and it’s a very reflective time for me. I would love to hear which one stood out to you and what you learned in 2010. Leave your comments below.

Vince Del Monte

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In response to your comment about uber dosing fish oils. Lets say I buy omega blue (60 servings) to a bottle each serving containing 2,000mg’s. For 20grams minimum of fish oil daily I would have to take 10 servings a day of that fish oil supplement so in total 20 gel capsules daily? I just want to make sure I understand the dosage and what you’re suggesting. Thanks Vince.

@Robert. That’s right but if you’ve never done that before, start with 10 and go to 15 and then to 20. One week at a time. The logic behind the high dosage fish oils is because I’m assuming your’e body is chronically inflamed like most people which means we’ll use a high dosage to take you attack the inflammation aggressively and then return to a more “normal” dose (10-15 grams a day) for maintenance. That’s the overall logic without getting overly personalized.

Hi Vince, I just want to say THANK YOU SO MUCH for this post! I think it’s THE list that will inspire me during the entire year 2011! I’m amazed to see how much you know (especially about marriage…I’ve been married for 6 years and most of the tricks you talk about here I figured out just RECENTLY! LOL). You are such an inspiration to me! I’m currently following your 90 days wedding workout, and I’m looking forward to having my best body every in 3 short months! I also love the fact that you outlined everything in videos…It makes it so much easier (plus it feels like it’s real live coaching!). Keep showing the world the path to better bodies and better lives! Best wishes to you and Flavia for 2011 -Marie

I’m not an easy sell bro but that list was simply awesome!!! You are a man who has a very solid grasp on his life and the things that are truly important and meaningful…Nice job! Have a great holiday season! I look forward to your future lists! mac.

Vin, I love #30 and #40 the most. I am 37 and have been married for 19 yrs. I agree with all the marriage advice, just remember to continue to practice it (i made that mistake). Divorce is definitely not an option. The newness changed, but that doesn’t mean your love dies. Put God first and he will draw you both together. Your Christian values is what sold me with you. Don’t let anything kill that in you. God Bless-Tom

Yeah i am a MYM member, amazing program. I have been using ” How you do anything is how you do everything” for a few years now. It’s from T Harv Ekers. ” The millionaire mind” or me and my fiends call it the ” Billionaire mind”

Another quote that is so simple yet so profound is.

” If a 100 foot oak tree had the mind of a human it would grow 10 feet tall”

We are our own worst enemies and We limit ourselves in our personal growth. so become aware of how you do anything then you become aware of how you do everything and grow too 200 feet tall.

Loved the 20th point….- actually stopped there n gave it a deep thought…very meaningful n arousing….yes will make sure to give reasons to people to like me before expecting !!!!

Point 24, oh yes man its all about Team, family n unity….unity is strength !!!!

Last point , no. 40…. Is d best one…..there is nothing better than GRATITUDE to be at peace from within…n its so true we all r blessed with one gift or another from almighty and if we acknowledge it and acknowledge it often, surely our life would be much simpler !!!

If I have to say one thing I have learned in year 2010, it would be following – MIND IS OVER MATTER !!!! Its all in our mind….if we think it…then we can get it n we will get it !!!! So m thinking n Creating !!!

Nice one Vince. Marriage is meeting that special someone you want to annoy for the rest of your life. I thought you were a bit cocky and full of yourself. I followed some of your chinning advice about starting from a hanging position and I ended up with elbow pain so I put your emails on filter to my archive box. You were one of many to get filtered this year, but you’ll get removed as I like your honesty and I recall your father was a pastor. Blessings, Ken

Vince, Marriage is an important one. It should be for the long haul. I’ve been married almost 38 years and still kiss my wife when we part. This was an inspiration to my oldest son (31) who just got engaged and will marry next year. He said he waited until he found the right person because he was only going to do it once and for life. Our actions made an impact on him that will serve him well. Richard in California where a 30 day marriage is common.

All good – I could comment on many but will just pick out #14 (band of brothers) as I am currently getting my own “band” in shape on Monday mornings – 4 other guys trying to help each other be the best we can be (in our families and businesses etc); and #16 – the digital device thing, am I the only one (besides you) who feel like they are taking over the world and causing people to NOT communicate with one another – good advice on leaving it home on your “date night”. Keep up the excellent work…Alberto

Your list honestly had a huge effect on me. It made me examine my life and question some of my actions. I’ve always been a firm believer in #11. #27 is very important for couples. Others negativity gets the best of us sooner or later. Negativity is like trash, you wouldn’t let someone dump their trash cans in your house so why let them bring their negativity towards their life and spouse into your mind? #28 Inspired me to start taking my GF out more and getting dressed up. With the craziness of life it’s easy to get into a routine of staying in.

You are one smart cookie and a good guy to have as a “virtual” mentor! Although I was glad to meet you in person at the Fitness Info Summit 2009. My challenge has always been overcoming my bad habits and reprogramming my mind for success. I think this is the MOST challenging part for many people.

Your rapid success has been an inspiration to me and a challenge to get my own sh!! together. I think you represent what is possible when you have a strong belief in yourself and your mission.

Definitely one of the best posts I have read this year on any forum or blog. I often take time out away from home with and without my wife this time of year to review, readdress and regoal.

Great stuff Vince. Welcome to the marriage world. Congrats. Sounds like you are one of the very few that have the right headspace for marriage. That is you married her to bring happiness to her life, not just for you. My wife and I celebrated our 11th anniversary last Sunday and we live exactly like the items you addressed in your married section. Well done.

@Matty. Are you a MYM member? I think that is a quote I used in one of my DVD’s…. you’re 100% right bro.

@Juan. That is correct but look at the EPA and DHA. You don’t want to buy the cheapest fish oil because ultimately you want a product with a formula high in EPA and DHA….something like Omega Blue from http://www.BlueStarNutritionals.com Another good product is NutraSea from http://www.ascentahealth.com/ I use this too.

Hi Vince Your posts keep getting better and better. 23. Learn how to say, “I’m sorry Dear. I was wrong, you were right. Will you forgive me?” 🙂 27. Distance yourself from couples who complain about their spouses and have unhealthy relationships. Hang out with couples who are real, in love with each other and have a relationship that you look up to. 40. Recognize you are blessed- whatever your current situation. There are tragedies all over the world and a good percentage of people are living in a hellish nightmare right now. Remember that everything you have is a gift from above and that it can be taken away just as quickly as it was given to you. Maximize and LIVE LARGE with what you have been given.

The above i think are very powerful Vince. I always learn lots from you. I would recommend the Release Technique as a good motivational tool, i’ve had great results from this, see http://www.releasetechnique.com Thanks again Vince for a really insightful teaching. Have a nice xmas and New Year.

Great post Vince. I agree about hot yoga…makes everything in the body better and the compliments every other workout. I really liked what you said about hiring a trainer as well and also on paying yourself first….such an easy money principle that makes a huge difference. Really enjoyed reading this list, thanks.

I love this post! I too discovered Yoga this year and love it. Not sure if it’s hot yoga but it is quite challenging. This year I tried to focus on staying positive no matter what and it does help a lot! Another thing I wanted to prove this year: a healthy diet and frequent exercise helps to not catch a cold 🙂

Question regarding fish oil. Is fish oil the same as omega 3 supplements. In my country all they sell is omega 3 supplements which is fish oil from blue fish (salmon, trout and some others). The bottle say to take 2 capsules per day which is equal to 1 g of fish oil. Should I just take 20 capsules every day to complete 10g?

Yo Vince! Thank You! for all of your inspiration.You are a very down to earth guy.You are a product of good up bringing and we should thank your Pops and Mom for that. As for #34 if at some point you want to hang out with people that have money,and say you are broke,what makes you think they want to hang out with you.Maybe they have a fear of becoming broke and dont want you around.where does that leave us?I guess it leads us to #40.I am BLESSED! no other words.I can and have learned about life,money,marriage,manhood,and muscle from my Dad, millionaire friends,to my friends on food stamps.No matter what, there is inspiration, for all of them to improve their lives..My Dad, through his actions(not words).taught me that you could sell yourself short by not talking to,or treating people in a respectful mannerEverybody has something to contribute.(most everybody)wheter its them inspiring you,or you inspiring them.We are all on this Journey together,lets learn from eachother. Keep up the the AWESOME! work in 2011.You and all your internet buddies have inspired me to start my own Heating and Air business through hard work,fit body,and a clearer sense of who I am.

You’re right, you are more introspective than last year–your post was very interesting. Most inspiring to me at this point is your run at competition (the Arnold Classic?). Since I probably will never be able to afford to assemble a Team Beverly of my own, I would appreciate your dropping some crumbs of your learning to us. And I like hearing about the process.

I like #10. I have a friend who collects workout videos, flitting from one program to another. I guess she thinks they’re going to work by osmosis. I’ve gently suggested she needs to pick just one, and USE it. . .

hi vince, greetings from colombia, South America, i “discovered” you by chance watching videos on youtube and since then have been a regular reader an have put in practice some – if not all – of your thecnics and tips, and have to say that im gratefull for all of your good energy and help you give us every day! thanks vince! have to say that couldnt buy any of your books, but the things you put in your blog an on youtube are great ans they brought me great results! keep it up! best regards!

I personally really appreciate all these listings. A healthy body needs an even healthier mind. I really aspire to reach the peak of both, It’s an invaluable balance which leads to living the best life possible.

As Vinny’s Pops (I still call him “Vinci”) I am very proud of his work and also of this current list he has compiled that I know he strives to live by. We all make mistakes on our journey of life but I don’t know anyone more teachable than Vinny when it comes to self correcting. way to go Vinny!! Here’s to an amazing 2011 with you and your amazing Bride.

@Dad. Thanks Papa Luch. You know that I get most of this from you… except the muscle stuff…haha

@Mario. One day I’ll share my story on how I started my online fitness business. Good idea.

@Alex. You’re right… living a life with no core values is like running a boat with no propeller to direct it.

@Xena. I am VERY self aware of how people perceive me… I figure if someone wants to get to know me they’ll see my true colors in time… I’m confident… and do my best not to be cocky… but then again, I am Italian so I have to represent sometimes…LOL

@Steve. Thanks for the reminder on unconditional love… I like your “bolted at the hatches” analogy.

@Michael. I know I’m king for gammer mistakes… hopefully all the content is in tact!

@Vahibav. Interesting perspective. You’re right… we can be a positive example.

Thanks to everyone’s comments so far. keep them coming. I read them ALL.

I loved your list. You said acouple of things that I’m really going to start focusing more from now on. Letting people talk about what I do right is one of them, I usually brag about what I do and that is not cool. Really need to improve on that one. The other is the money, I’m usually so concerned about bills that I neved save and when I have money left I just splurge on somenthing stupid. You are right save first. And the last thing that I really loved whas the relationship part, I know that I was already doing a good job on that area but there’s always room from improvement. Hey I was thinking could you give some advice to anyone that is starting a business online?

Very good post Vince !! For sure very inspiring and covering all sides of life, not just only bodybuilding, fitness and cockyness, wich most guys only focus on.. i think that marriage has made you a more sensitive, focused and caring guy (you get the whole picture now).. Flavia must be a very good wife and i wish you all the best !! My favourite subject is “If you don’t stand for something then you’ll fall for everything”.. man, there are things that you can only learn from the people who have been around for a long time… and to be successfull in any aspect in life you gotta heve principles and stand for your ideas.. orelse you are just a boat with no engine going along the current.. principles, character and respect are exactly what this crazy new world is lacking right now and i trully thatk you for being and example and trying to spread these kinda toughts and also trying to change this world into a healthier place both physically and mentally 😉 Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year !!

First that I read your Top 40 things… I feel them all, really recognizable,really inspiring, really straight forward and I think really honest( especially with nr12, cause I do actually think you sometimes come across a bit off cocky but then again hey you know your stuff and after all u are Italian no offence,LOL) And yes nr 40 always have and keep that in mind! Sweet mr Vince! 2011 here we come!!!!! 🙂

You share the same nick-name with my son – and he’s no “scrawny weed” either!:-)

I agree with Jason, #40 is the main one for those of us living in civilized world…. Took me too long to learn that one, but it finally came home when i visited a S-21 Genocide Museum in Phnom Penn, Cambodia. Now if ever I feel like complaining, I go back in my mind to that place. That chill down my spine instantly blasts any feeling of hardship completely out my mind – talk about re-framing!!!

I really hope you can remain true to you “marriage commitment” – You’re wise to have “bolted down the hatches” to go the distance. Most people just don’t get it… In life, you get out in proportion to what you put in so why should marriage be any different? I would just add one other item which I’m sure you already know… “unconditional love” is where most people fail. it has to be learned by regular affirmation, the same way you train your muscles:-).

I think that it was the marage one as to how sometimes you might actually be wrong about something. Actually, the reason I like that is that it suggests that you’re not one of those people who has nothing to say unless asked a question, lol. You might even be one of those great people who asks questions and is not ashamed of the fact I bet, – come to thihnk of it.

I’m sure you would agree in other aspects of your life, Attention To Detail (ATD) is very important, so why not apply it to your newsletters….(although I must admit, things have improved since you got married…)

Great post Vince. Loved your bit about knowledge gained in 2010. However one point i must say is you shouldnt distance yourself from couples who quarrel a) your relationship acts as an inspiration to them b) you both realize how lucky you are to tackle issues differently and ignore the silly issues when people are haggling over more serious ones. Puts things into context so to speak.

“A man should aspire to be successful, but success should never come at the expense of others or at the expense of compromising one’s standards. ” – This is truly inspiring. I have been truly motivated not only by your health tips but with your words of wisdom as well. I hope to receive more powerfull ideas from you on your future emails. Keep doin’ what you have been doing. God bless.

I really enjoyed the list about manhood. I’m discovering more and more about that topic everyday. I’m 19 years old, just moved to Los Angeles and still figuring out who I am right now, but slowly I am starting to see the man that I want to become someday. I’ve been inspired by you and your lifestyle and fully commit myself to staying healthy and fit. I’m not exactly the body builder type (5’11″/154lbs.) But I continue to train and diet and have been seeing some really good results.

Everyone should have #40 hanging on their fridge. People need to always remember that others have it much worse then they do. Ambition is a wonderful thing, but we also need to appreciate what we have.