Grayson Perry has been trying to work out whether he will be able to operate PowerPoint for his forthcoming London Palladium show, Typical Man in a Dress, wearing an embroidered, silver-foil wing suit. “It’s quite stiff but I’ve been practising,” he says, flapping his arms in imitation.

Perry’s show, in which he will perform as his transvestite alter ego Claire, is based on The Descent of Man, his new book about masculinity and what it means to be male. It’s been a perennial theme of the cross-dressing potter, yet for all the art, irreverent jokes and colourful outfits, he takes a surprisingly harsh line.

“I sometimes watch the evening news on television and think all the world’s problems can be boiled down to one thing: the behaviour of people with a Y chromosome,” he says. Men do seem to be getting a hard time of it at the moment. “A hard time?” he retorts. “Who from? A few Western men in the media are getting a hard time from a few Western women in the media. But if you look at it globally, men are pissing all over the world.”

Today, in his Islington studio, surrounded by his tapestries, photographs and sketchbooks, and dressed in pink T-shirt and blue trousers held up by braces, Perry comes over as resolutely blokey. Careful not to delve into what he calls “the Pandora’s Box” of other cultures — “they’re not going to be handing copies of my book out in IS holiday camps” — he has directed his fire at a group he dubs Default Man. “White, middle-class, heterosexual men, usually middle-aged, who continue to colonise the high-status, high-earning, high-power roles. They’re the ones doing the most damage.”

Donald Trump? “He’s the ultimate Default Man, the gift that keeps on giving. I wonder when they’ll run out of excuses for excusing him. But I don’t think he’s anything special. There are a lot of men like him; feminism has passed them by.”

With characteristic good grace, Perry is the first to admit he’s a bit of a Default Man himself, although having been born into a working-class family in Chelmsford partly lets him off the hook. “I can be very traditionally masculine, territorial and competitive,” he concedes, especially towards other men. “Part of writing about men is that I can get one over on them; yeah, totes,” he chuckles. Does he feel he got one over on Jonathan Jones, the Guardian’s art critic, who has consistently given Perry’s work derisory reviews, with his sketch of a new pot bearing the quote, “‘Suburban popular culture’ — Johnathan [sic] Jones”. The drawing was released at a recent press event for his 2017 Serpentine show.

Perry snorts with laughter. “Well, I’m being interviewed for a newspaper, so I don’t want inflame the flames and I have no real beef with the guy. It was just a doodle which they put out to publicise the show and it worked brilliantly. Let’s face it. Publicity’s what you want, isn’t it?”

Grayson Perry: All Man - Channel 4 documentary trailer

In his case, yes. Yet the inveterate publicity-seeker, who is now 56, admits that greater trans-awareness, together with his ever-increasing fame, means that cross-dressing in public no longer holds the thrill it once did. “One of my joke regrets about becoming well known is that it’s ruined being a transvestite. Now I’m not the anonymous weirdo in the street, I’m Grayson Perry. I’m on duty. If I’m cycling in a dress, people want to have chats and a selfie. It’s nice but at the same time I don’t get that frisson of being ‘othered’ and stared at, or have the fantasy of being humiliated, which was all very exciting,” he laughs. “But it’s a luxury fantasy because I’d much rather that we’re free to dress exactly how we like. We’re accepted now.”

Fifty Shades of Grayson: with wife Philippa (Rex Features)

Transvestites may be dime a dozen these days but Perry believes there’s still what he calls a “cultural lag” between our rational desire for gender equality and what we actually find erotic. “The guy who is a metrosexual, enlightened employer and a lovely guy by day may be turned on by wanting to dominate in the bedroom, and maybe his girlfriend wants to be dominated too.” He suspects that the success of Fifty Shades of Grey is the result of “leisure S&M”, of women feeling that since they have a more stable equality they may feel “more licensed to exercise fantasies of subjugation”. Is that acceptable? “Sure. Men have fantasies about being dominated by women too,” he nods, pointing at himself. “It’s the fact that there is a power exchange going on. It’s a fantasy, remember, not a manual for behaviour.”

As Claire, Perry continues to push limits. The outfits, which started off as “a cross between Katie Boyle and Camilla Parker Bowles”, before segueing into Little Bo Peep, have become “progressively more extreme and funnier”, which is largely down to Perry’s students at St Martins, who design up to 20 new ones for him a year. “I encourage them to make the dresses as bizarre and exciting as they can.”

10 exhibitions not to miss in 2016

10 exhibitions not to miss in 2016

1/10
Women: New Portraits from Annie Leibovitz

Wapping Hydraulic Power Station, January 16 - February 7
This exhibition will update the collaboration between Leibovitz and Susan Sontag that first emerged more than 15 years ago. A series of extraordinary photographs taken by the incomparable Annie Leibovitz looks at the role of women in the world today.
ubs.com

Annie Lebovitz, from WOMEN: New Portraits

2/10
Visions of our Solar System

Natural History Museum, January 22 - May 15
Dramatic photographs from Michael Benson are paired with an original score from Brian Eno in an exploration of our solar system, showing it in all its stunning glory.
nhm.ac.uk

3/10
Electronic Superhighway

Whitechapel Gallery, January 29 – May 15
More than 100 artworks feature in this exploration of how the computers and the internet have impacted artists over the last 50 or so years. Work comes from the likes of Cory Arcangel, Jeremy Bailey, James Bridle and Constant Dullaart.
whitechapelgallery.org

4/10
Painting the Modern Garden: Monet to Matisse

Royal Academy of Arts, January 30 - April 20
From the 1860s to the 1920s, gardens served as a heavy influence on artists across the world, especially in the Impressionist, Post-Impressionist and Avant-Garde movements. This exhibition will detail how, with a stunning collection of works from the likes of Monet, Renoir, Cezanne, Pissarro, Manet, Sargent, Kandinsky, Van Gogh, Matisse, Klimt and Klee.
royalacademy.org.uk

Claude Monet, Water Lilies, 1914-15/Royal Academy

5/10
Vogue 100 - A Century of Style

National Portrait Gallery, February 11 – May 22
Iconic magazine Vogue will be showcasing the best of its British publication in this exhibition, which promises to be little short of stunning. It's part of Vogue's centenary celebrations. It will feature 280 prints from the Condé Nast archive, revealing the extent of the magazine's substantial influence on fashion, taste, and culture at large.
npg.org.uk

Vogue/Vogue 100/National Portrait Gallery

6/10
The Clangers, Bagpuss & Co

The V&A Museum of Childhood, March 19 - October 9
Oliver Postgate's voice and Peter Firmin's puppets, which include Bagpuss, The Clangers and Ivor the Engine had a dramatic hand in shaping the childhood of millions of children in Britain and across the world. This display will tell the story of the puppets, of Smallfilms and Four Corners books, and of how Postgate and Firmin developed their signature stop-animation process.
vam.ac.uk

Smallfilms & Four Corners books/V&A Museum of Childhood

7/10
Exhibitionism: The Rolling Stones

Saatchi Gallery, April 5 - September 4
The Saatchi Gallery will be taken over by never-before-seen Stones memorabilia, rare instruments, iconic costumes, album artwork and even the band's personal diaries. This exhibition will reveal their story from 60s blues band to the world's greatest rock n' roll band.
saatchigallery.com

Stones Archive/Gerry Images

8/10
This Is A Voice

Wellcome Collection, April 14 – July 31
An exhibition for the ears: This Is A Voice explores how voices work, how we emotions are carried in our tone, pitch and rhythm of speech, and looks at non-verbal forms of communication, too. Paintings, manuscripts and illustrations compliment an acoustic journey featuring work from artists and vocalists including Joan La Barbara, Marcus Coates, Matthew Herbert and Imogen Stidworthy.
wellcomecollection.org

Enrico David, courtesy Michael Werner Gallery, New York and London

9/10
Undressed: A brief history of underwear

The V&A, April 16 – March 12 2017
Worth going to for the pun-tastic title alone, this exhibition explores all things lingerie, from its practical use to its place in the world of high fashion and, of course, how its developed and shaped our attitudes towards sensuality and sexuality.
vam.ac.uk

Photographer Sebastian Faena, Model Eniko Mihalik

10/10
Painters Painting: Van Dyck to Freud

National Gallery, June 22 - September 4
Ever wondered what painters hang on their walls? On display here will be works owned by the likes of Lucian Freud, Matisse, Degas, Lawrence, Reynolds, and Van Dyck. It will explore why painters were interested in the work of others, and their reasons for building a collection, from personal interest to artistic inspiration. It should be a fascinating insight into what made some of our greatest artists tick.
nationalgallery.org.uk

Detail from Jean-Baptiste-Camille Corot, Italian Woman, about 1870

Keen to keep in shape because the frocks are all the same size, Perry has also adapted his make-up routine to accommodate his middle-aged wrinkles. Does ageing bother him or Claire? “I don’t look in the mirror and think, ‘God you poor old bastard’, but I do use what I call off-road make-up to cope with all the bumps, because I haven’t got that smooth eyelid any more. You know what it’s like, trying to put on eyeliner,” he says, pulling his eyelid flat. And then you relax and it goes…,” he says, making a juddering sound. “One of my innovations is the under-eye jewel to hide the bags. If you use spirit gum they never fall off, but they’re quite uncomfortable.”

Although Perry still boasts a full head of thick, strawberry-blond hair, as Claire he has started wearing wigs. “I haven’t worn this one out before,” he says, showing me a picture on his pink iPhone of Claire with under-eye jewels and a silky, lemon-yellow bob-cut wig. “It’s a cartoon version of my own hair.”

Grayson Perry with daughter Flo (Getty Images)

As Perry’s fame has grown, so has the price of his work. Last week Sotheby’s announced an auction record of £112,500 for his 1999 Punters in the Snow pot, while at Frieze London his Chris Huhne vase — which he smashed and mended with gold — sold for £120,000. He insists wealth hasn’t changed him, just given him more opportunities. “I still spend what my wife [psychotherapist Philippa Perry] calls Essex money. When you grew up with no money, you’ve still got the sting of ‘Ooh that’s a bit extravagant’, but I do treat myself sometimes.” He’s just commissioned that ultimate boy’s toy, a custom-built motorbike, “because I fancied it”, costing tens of thousands, much to Philippa’s delight. As much a critic as she is a fan, Philippa is, he says, “dead sharp” and keeps him grounded. They have one daughter, Flo, who is 24 and a senior staff writer at BuzzFeed.

Perry considers himself lucky to have fulfilled so many of his ambitions but regrets the fact that he was never reconciled with his estranged mother, Jean Dines, before she died earlier this year. She and Perry’s father separated when Perry was a child. She later remarried and, as Perry recounted in his 2007 autobiography of his early years, his stepfather was violent and abusive. The teenage Perry went to live with his father until his stepmother discovered he cross-dressed and threw him out. “I fantasised about [a reconciliation] for a long time, then lobbied her for it, but it didn’t happen. I didn’t go to her funeral but I’ve had good therapy, so I feel pretty resilient.”

Therapy has played a huge part in his life, not least in shaping his blueprint for a new kind of masculinity, where men have the right to be vulnerable, weak and wrong. It has also taught him the difference between privacy and secrecy. “Secrecy is where you keep something from somebody that would affect them if they knew about it, whereas privacy is something you just don’t want to talk about,” he says, “and I’ve got nothing to hide.”

For now, his focus is on producing new work for his Serpentine show next June, modestly titled The Most Popular Art Exhibition Ever! “There’ll be media I haven’t exhibited before.” What kind? “Oh, I can’t talk about that.” Is that a secret or is it private? “No,” he replies, “it’s just the logic of PR.”

The Descent of Man is published by Allen Lane, £16.99. The Typical Man In A Dress tour includes the London Palladium on November 3, rutlive.co.uk/event/grayson-perry