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Sunday, January 30, 2011

Don't Stop Believing

Sometimes I go to type a blog and I wonder if people will like it..or if they'll ever come back to read my blog..."was it interesting enough"...."maybe I should've blogged about a lipgloss instead"...."maybe that will make no one want to come back and read my blog tomorrow".....ha ha ha

I hope this post goes out to someone who's heart needs to hear this today.

"no one knows the sadness in our hearts except for God..."

I think it's so funny whenever someone tells me that they think I have this "perfect" life...ha ha ha
My life is so far from perfect...it's funny.
My heart breaks for the imperfections in my life...
that I'm divorced...that my kids won't grow up like I did...always knowing the stability of "home"...
my heart aches so much...when the kids have to go visit their dad...it feels like their little world feels so "unpredictable"....my world feels like a huge hole is missing from my heart when they're not with me...
and it's so hard...
hot tears are filling up my eyes as I try to type this..oh the tears make it so blurry I can't really see the keyboard.....

My life is so far from perfect...it is full of hurts, wounds, and scars...
I know what it feels like to have an aching heart...to feel all alone...to feel like your life is so far from perfect or anywhere near it...that you just want to cry until you have nothing left to cry...that you are in the deep, deep depths of a valley...far from the happy mountain tops!

Please know...that you are not alone. Whatever hurts or scars you have...that is the beauty. The strength that says...I WILL NOT let this defeat me. I won't let anyone ruin my heart. I will make this life beautiful...no matter what gets thrown at me....no matter what things may seem like mountains in my path... I will find away through it.

No one's life is perfect...no one is just happy on the mountain tops all the time. We all have valleys, with low moments of hurt and pain (that's just life)...but it's in those moments of low-ness, when are true character comes out...when God hopes that we will come running to him, for him to hold us and be what are hearts are longing for.

Most often...what seems IMPOSSIBLE...is just something that's never been done before. My life has been filled with things that I thought seemed "impossible" to me...
they probably were impossible...but with God ALL things are possible...
joy in times of sadness...peace when everything should feel like chaos...
I may have tears at night...but I know that joy can always show up in the morning.
Every sunrise is a bright and shining new day...waiting with a little more hope...a little more bits of glimmering sparkles to encourage you on your way.

My heart feels sad...and no one will ever know my hurts...or your hurts...except for God...but he's there to lift those burdens from your heart and fill the holes of hurt...with his perfect love. He know the plans he has for you...plans to give you hope and a prosperous future...
hold on...you have no idea what's around the corner in your future....
KEEP HOPE ALIVE....HOPE is what pulls us through....you need the seed of hope to grow that dream to become real!

BELIEVE it...that's the first step.

HOPE for it...and don't stop...second step.

KEEP ON BELIEVING....and never stop...the moment you stop believing...you end the oxygen to your dreams!

this was typed with so much love that I hope you can feel it...
sending you so much hope and love right now....your kandee

I always love your inspiring blogs Kandee. It helps me to keep striving for my goal to become the best make up artist that I can be and be able to live off what I make and not struggle. You shared so much of your life with us all and for that we are blessed and thankful to have you in our worlds! :)

Thank you for this post! It speaks to my heart so much. It is so helpful to know that someone out there has felt and does feel the way I find myself feeling. Thank you for the reminder that God knows and is always there. Have a wonderful day!

This is exactly what I needed today Kandee...thank you so much. My dog of 17 years passed away yesterday and has left my heart broken into a million pieces. With all the joy you have in your life and a newborn to take care of you took the time out of your day to write what I needed! Thank you!

I am so happy for you and your family, your little cupcake is so precious. Your encouraging words touched my heart. I know what it's like to have people think you have a 'perfect' life and to have it be anything but that. I have been a makeup artist for the same amount of time you have and you have helped me be excited about it again and I am so thankful to you. I pray that God blesses you and your family.

you are a great inspiration to me.....and especially now that i am also going through something really tough on me.....i really like your inspiring words and it makes me pull it together because if you can do it then why cant we all.....??? thanks so much....

Thank you, Kandee!!! This was a beautiful post. I'm glad to see you portraying yourself as "normal" and not the Kandee we always watch in youtube videos (although we LOVE that Kandee too!). But this post right here helps so many people and I know I'm one of them. It's "real" so thank you!! I had tears in my eyes myself when I was reading it...Beautiful!!!http://jeanniegarcia.blogspot.com/p/media.html

My parents got divorced, just like my aunts and my grandparents. I afraid that it will happen to me too. Because of that I usually don't let boys get close to me because I'm afraid, none of them are the ONE who I can live happily ever after. :(But I hope future holds something brighter to me. Anything happens, I want kids when I grow up, even if I will be a single mom! :)

so so beautiful kandee, i can feel what your feeling through what you have written. you give ppl so much hope. My life is far from perfet & i know i am different, it's so refreshing to read your lovely words...lots of love from england! i'm so glad i found you on youtube! xxx

Kandee, Ive luv your videos and your blogs. You're right hun, no ones life is perfect. I am fighting the fight of my life right now but God is seeing me through it all. Sendin happy thoughts and prayers your way!

This comment spoke straight to my torn heart! I've been having a painful morning, now afternoon. Couldn't help but start crying all over again from reading the first line. Thank you for your precious words, it's amazing how people all over the world can be reached out to and possibly be able to make their day a little brighter from miles and miles away! Bless you Kandee<3

Kandee, I have never posted before, but you have been a part of my life for a couple of years. You are such an amazing person, such a strong spirit. I love your video blogs and all your encouraging words. There is no doubt that you touch so many peoples hearts. You swell of goodness! So keep up the good work and know that so many of us wait with bated breath for your next post! Always so interesting and exciting. We never know what we get next. Bless you Kandee and all your little cupcakes.We love you and appreciate all that you give to us!

Kandee, you should never worry about your posts not being interesting enough because so many people love ya bunches and will stand behind you!!

I needed to read this today, I had a not so great morning and reading this is what kept my heart from being ruined, like you said. Most of the people that I absolutely love and are close to me dont agree with my beliefs and its getting hard to not feel so hurt by it. Thank you so much for your amazing words that I desperately needed and I hope I can meet you again one day!!!

OMG Kandee - I was sat here crying through being in the pain my disability I have had for 3 years now has "ruined" my life. Then I read your latest blog and it filled me with hope that "yes" I'm not perfect but that doesn't make me any less of a person.

Thank you for such inspiration - I am a fairly newbie to your blogs and have used your makeup posts to improve the way I can look on the outside.

Now I find you healing me from the inside too and I would like to thank you so much for sharing with us all.

Huge congratulations on the birth of Cupcake - I have been dying to write back on one of your posts but haven't felt quite like I had something important enough to say but tonight I have.

Thank you for this post Kandee, my heart is in real need of your words. I have hope but I'm going through a very tough time right now. I don't know where my life is going, I think I know what I want to do, but I know that is not the right thing to do. I just wish that I can go to sleep and wake up when all of these is over :( why this things have to happen to me? life is so unfair I just want to be happy. And I have hope but I see happiness very far away from me right now.

My sweet kandee,I am crying so hard right now....this has really hit home. I have been feeling lost and unsure of my future. I have been holding these tears for so long. To read you blog today has made it all better for me. I will not stop believing. This is why I come to your blogs for you beautiful words of inspiration. I love you very much. I pray one day I will meet you in person and thank you for all the things your words and makeup vids have done in my life. God bless you. With so much love and respect to you.

I really like that you're blogs are so much more then only about lipglosses (: I get so much hope and love from you trough them... Thank you for sharing you're hart with us (: And amazing thing about God is that He never gives up on us... AND He is the healer of broken harts... He has picked up my broken hart and put it back together so many times (:

Thank you Kandee for your precious words of wisdom.. I came to your blog with tears in my eyes.. Just struggles from the day.. and I read your words and I started to feel hopeful again.. Please Please dont ever feel that what you is not being read.. because it is .. in MASS volume.. Thank you for all you do.. and Thank You for helping put the smile back on so many faces..

Wow you always have the right words to say... I would have loved to have read something like this about 4 years ago when I was going through my divorce. I was 23 and getting divorced after only being married 9 months. But because my ex- husband moved back to Hawaii he filed over there so it couldn't be annulled like here in Cali. Divorce is no easy thing. And we didn't have kids or property to split up. It was all just uglyness. But thank god it's all done and gone lost in the past and I'm happy to say I've found a real man who's by my side for the past 2 years and we are newly weds looking forward to our future. Life does go on and the times get easier. But like you said keep believing! I just wanna thank you so much for letting us all get a glimpse into your life and you continue to inspire so many of us! Your doing a great and wonderful job! Thank you Kandee!

"...you need the seed of hope to grow that dream to become real!"Thank you soo much Kandee for giving hope to people and be the best example of kindness! May God bless you! Please keep doing what you are doing and never stop to encourage us and be a sunshine like you are! Lots of love!xoxo

Kandee, Thank you for your wonderfulwords. They brightend my day. I am having a very bad day church helpd then bad things happen and i am broken again. Thank you for remindig me that all things are possible with God. It seems so big now, but i can pus throug. Thank you for being so amazing. You are perfect in God's eyes. I know the hurt and whole in your heart when kids have to leave to go to dads. its the worst ever.

Kandee, you really can't imagine how much I needed to read one of your inspiration blogs today. My aunt passed away this morning and it really hurts. I send you a private message at youtube, I thought that maybe you would have a little time when cupcake is asleep to write me something like what you just posted here. And it really helped. You are an inspiration Kandee, you're a wonderful woman who has been trough a lot and is still able to smile every day and to notice all the beauty around you. Sometimes, I feel like you are a friend besides being my favourite youtube guru.Wish you all the best, love.Agustina :)

My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for some time now and it's just not happening. I see your daily blogs of your little cupcake and I am overjoyed for you, but yet my heart aches at the thought of not having my own cupcake. Your words let me know that I have to remain hopeful and that I must stay in prayer. Thanks a lot and God Bless You!

How can anyone say that you are not precious, that you are not worthy of Gods Love. How is it possible that there are people saying bad and hateful things about you and your family. I can't say that i know you, i've never seen your face, i've never really heard your voice. I've never been to your country( i'm Dutch) but what you write and the video's you make reflects Gods everlasting love. I CAN say that in what i've seen of you i saw a woman created like Gods Heart. I was so down for a very long time, and my heart has hurt so badly. I gave up all my dreams because there were boy who hit the dreams out of my body. They would wait for me after school and they would hit and kick me just because they thought that i was ugly...

You gave me reason..... You gave me hope

God, throuhg you gave me LIFE.

Thank You Kandee..... your truly a heavens Send. to your children, family..... and many more.

Thank you so much for posting this. Kandee, you always make me happy, and see the Negative things more Positive. You're so a inspiration for me. - I read your blogs and Watching your vid's every day. - You always make me smile. ALWAYS! - I love you, Kandee.

i love all your post..especially this one. we, as moms, divorced or not, can feel your hurt. its the uncertainty of tomorrow or the future that (at least to me) is what is the scariest. but only we have the power to control that uncertainty. keep your head up kandee and your future, even in the darkest of nights, will be bright. :)

omg kandee i feel like your literly one of my close friends :) you always say the right words at the right time ..it so happends that yes at this moment i feel like crying and crying and crying ..untill i have no more tears left ..your blogg really helped me alot although i started following you for your wonderful makeup tips i now reallize u are not just a makeup artist you are a down to earth person !

Kandee you have no idea how much that means to me right now. I am going through a rough time and feel so lonely and cry myself to sleep at night. I have a 2 yr old AMAZING daughter and her father and I split up and it is the hardest thing ever. Thanks for your encouraging words. You are the best :)

Thank you so much kandee, you have made my heart feel filled of joy, that is so true. I'm lucky to have such a wonderful and beautiful friend that is so true .you are a blessing to me and everyone, congrats to cupcake on her 1 week here that is so wonderful she is blessed to have such an amazing family... Thank you for taking time and writing for everyone and having so much love and truth! Your the Best Kandee!!!!! Love your friend Tatiana

Kandee, you are amazing. You are such a good person, and just because I've never personally met you doesn't mean I can't tell that from your posts and videos. I too sit with a broken heart for 3-4 days at a time while my son visits his father. it is so unnatural for this to be happening, especially for a 2 year old. And I too was brought up in a house with a rock-solid marriage, and I feel like such a failure, i failed my son before he was even born by entering a marriage that was doomed from the start. and unfortunately the court definitely doesn't have the childrens best interests at heart.We will survive this, and so will our children. We have good hearts, and they will too. <3

thank you all so much for your precious comments...I sit reading them with tears in my eyes...thank you for your gift to me today...of your loving words...I am so humbled and honored to be a part of your hearts....tears and love...kandee

You cant' imagine how much important is this post to me..... I am having a very bad days (or months!?) and these words really touched my heart.I dont' know how, but YOU gave me a new "energy"... so that I can go ahead without any other tears running out...Thanks for this "Hope's Energy".I truly and deeply "love" you darling! You are so precious for me! <3

Kandee, thank you SO much for sharing your beautiful heart with us!I teared up just reading this. I think we all can relate to this post, more then you know! thank you for being so "real" and inspiring.I loved the part of "He knows the plans he has for you...plans to give you hope and a prosperous future..." I have been a christian since I can remember and have heard this quoted a thousand times I would say - but for some reason the 1,001 time today really spoke to me. it really touched my heart. knowing that we have someone rooting for us, someone who never thinks ill of us, or labels us by our mistakes, someone who ONLY hopes for the best for our life AND works to bring it to pass, is the most amazing thing to me! life feels VERY uncertain for my little family and I right now as we're about to venture across the nation to start a whole new life (job, house, school, church the works!) and trusting Him and NOT LOSING HOPE is what I know will bring us through it all. thank you so much for being a beautiful light in this world! people love you not just for your outward beauty, talents, great sense of fashion,(and humor haha) but the God in you that shines with every smile you give us, encouraging word you write or video you make!THAT is who we love and THAT is what brings us back. xoxoxo!

Your text was so beautifull, its nice that you can speaks and tell the things the way they are. You are so unique and full of love and its so beautifull! I idmire you to everything you do or say.. And no ones is perfect.. Thats true. But you are so, i dont even know the word... You just are so unique and i respect you for that! I sent power to you too! <3

thanks 4 those words kandee n never think that we wont come back well i will i grown 2 love u like a far away sister =] but close at the same time i appreciate everything u do 4 us n thanks kandee u always know wat 2 say .... love ♥Rosie ♥

Kandee, this was absolutely wonderful. I needed to hear this right now and it sent hot tears down my face, too. Thank you so much for being way more than just another makeup artist- you truly are a beautiful woman inside and out.I hope you know that you can't change what has already happend, but God planned it all. He loves you SO much that He will help you through everything; you just have to invite Him on the ride. :) Kandee, you are a wonderful mother to your kids, and the best thing you can do is love them. If there's love, then no matter what, things will all work out. Again, thank you so much for this wonderful bit of encouragment. I want you to know I'm praying for you every day. :) Love, Caroline

Kandee, this morning my heart was so full of sadness for so many different reasons, I prayed to god that he would ease my hurting, and not long after my boy came and curled up on the sofa with me and shared his fruit with me, just a little gesture that lifted my heart so high and made me be able to sit and think of positive ways that I can help to resolve these issues.You are my blessing Kandee Johnson, not to sound corny but I swear in many ways you have saved me, huge love xx

This is just what I needed, I just fell on ice@ the back door chasing one dog out of the trash, went to get salt for ice, when OTHER DOG ran out garage door & ran off, he's a runner, always has been, so frustrating, for 8 years, EVERY time a door is open, he's gone!! BUT YOU ARE so right, God knows our needs, only God knows our frustrations and only HE can heal them. Thank you for your positive blog. Keeping you in my prayers.

i love the saying "this too, shall pass". remembering that helps me to just trust God and know that he will help me through the rough times in my life. i love the idea that he is carrying me and won't let me fall.

you know whats funny, is that i check both of your blogs daily. i feel like i know you already or something.its weird to think someone as beautiful as you could hurt the way i do sometimes. im actually overwhelmed with a lot in my life and i am depressed deeply by it everyday. your words encourage me to not let it get to me and to make something positive come out of the bad. you are truly someone special and i am blessed that i even know who you are because i may not know you personally, but you already mean a lot to me.

Thanks so much, Kandee. I really needed to hear this today. God is so Good! It's SO encouraging and inspiring to see him working through you, my sister in Christ! God is SO proud of you and SO AM I! :) xoxo

Kandee, thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU for being you!! Only God knows how much you mean to me and so many others, I'm sure. You brighten my day every time you have a new blog post or video, whether I'm in a good mood or not. I feel your love coming through this blog post and I hope you can feel my love reaching out to YOU from this comment. Yay for kindred spirits even though we don't know each other in 'real' life LOL! I'm currently re-building my relationship with God and your words and happiness remind me of his Love. Love you!!! xoxo

I instantly thought of the song from Journey...which is a great song! =)

I love reading your blogs, no matter what you post, and I think most people will agree to this. When you write what's on your heart, then you're writing with truth, and that's more important than writing about anything else. =) That's why people love you--you're not all about make-up...you are about real beauty, the stuff that comes from within. =)

So don't stop believing that! =D (hehe)

You may not be perfect, but you're perfectly you!

And when you call upon God to move those mountains, and He doesn't move them, then that's when another journey begins...you must climb that mountain! But when we're at the top, you can soar like an eagle! Isaiah 40:31 says, "...but they that wait for Jehovah shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk, and not faint."

I hope that your day is bright and sunny (but not too warm to melt the beautiful snow outside!)

Thank you Kandee, thank you so much for your bloggin'.. you're heart-lifter.. and inspiration..! and we love everythin' you type.. everythin' you take time and write to us.. about your life, family, make-up, everythin'..! we love you Kandee, and i am sure God loves you too.. and nobody's life is perfect, we all have to go through difficulties, dats how He tests his creation, and da one's who go thorough more hardship are more beloved to God Almighty..

Thank you once again Kandee.. for everythin'..! you're a true inspration..! <3 wish i could hug you for real.. Love you so much..! xoxoxo and we hope you'll always keep postin' blogs like dis, and we love to hear about your family and your life.. thanks for makin' us a part of your life...

Hi Kandee - I am a loyal sister friend to you and I just love you so much. I wanted to let you know that I came to you today to look for a little encouragement because I am about to complete my paperwork for a protective order against my ex-husband. I am only 27 years old and have been through alot of what you have been through too. Unfortunately, I am being harrased and lies are being spread about me. I know God is my strength and I am trusting Him. I love you and thank you for this word of encouragement today. I am standing on the Truth, just like you are and hoping for a brighter tomorrow. I appreciate your love and prayers. I am praying for you too. love always, shannon w.

P.S.Last night, I had a dream that my family was watching TV, and YOU HAD YOUR OWN TELEVISION SHOW!!! We were all super excited for you! So keep your chin up, I know that God has great plans in store for you :)

thank you kandee for your message of hope, i really need it at this time of my life, i have two kids and about to separate with their father, just because i am belgian and he is pakistani, his family just succeeded to split us up

thank you kandee for your message of hope, i really need it at this time of my life, i have two kids and about to separate with their father, just because i am belgian and he is pakistani, his family just succeeded to split us up

Bless you Kandee. There are so many awesome comments on this page that I always hope you get mine. I'll tell you what I usually do, and that is, keep these blogs coming, you help me through my days. I went to the markets yesterday here on the Gold Coast, QLD, Australia and they had MAC cosmetics. I wished I had you with me to tell me what to get. :DIt's true that everyone has low moments, but it's how you choose to get through them that makes the difference.

"Even though the journey’s long And I know the road is hard Well, the One who’s gone before me He will help me carry on After all that I’ve been through Now I realize the truth That I must go through the valley To stand upon the mountain of God"-Mountain of God by Third Day.

This post made me think of this song which I love and helps me when ever I feel hurt or down. I love that you are YOU and that you hold on to your believes no matter what others might think. And I love that even though you have been through so much, your a warrior and you still have a smile on your face and in your heart. Reading your blog brightens up my day and gives me hope for tomorrow. I hope I have the opportunity to meet you one day and thank you in person because without you knowing it,God has used you to help me. God bless you Kandee.

Sweet love Kandee! I have a request. Could you PLEEASE post a picture of cupcake's room? The colors or theme you are going for. Or maybe the theme you are planning on making the room? ^_^ I'm askin' for goooood reason. LOVE YOU MS. AWESOME GIRL! You are too awesome. Love Corinne*

Just like everyone above me, tears fell down my face as I read your post. Reading both your words and the comments gives me such comfort knowing I'm not the only one going through heartache today. It's one of those days where everything I don't like about myself comes to the surface. Sometimes my own thoughts break my own heart. I push people away like they have guns pointed at me and put on a defensive armor before I even leave the house. I'm so terrified of rejection that I don't let people get close to me. My independence is something everyone compliments me on, but they have no idea how lonely my heart is.

Your blog is always so uplifting to me. I wish I knew you in real life, Kandee. I would love to just hug you and thank you in person for being such a good friend to me when I had no one. Sending you so much love!

Kandee, I just want to thank for posting this blog and it has encouraged me! I will continue to push on and make it through. And I'm even going to blog about how you've helped me. I love you dearly! Thanks for understanding when no one else could. Love Jessica Knoelle.

Beautiful. I second the comments that say you should consider a book. I am a psychotherapist and I can't tell you how much people need encouragement like this. Thank you so much for sharing the highs and lows - you inspire me!

Thank you so much! for posting such amazing and encouraging blogs that should empower everyone who reads it. blogs like these give me so much strength to keep pushing for the next day and praying to god for help. though the world sometimes seems like a dark and horrible place, those little moments of pure bliss make the struggles well worth it. every day is a new day and people themselves choose their attitdes and how the live it. i always try to remember that "god gave us mountains, so we could learn how to climb"xoxo, Lauren(:

(I know it's probably you're truck load of hormones getting the best of you right now haha) but it's good to see you open up and say you're sad! It's ok to be sad for whatever reason you have at that moment. You're always sooooo cheery and bubbly (me too in the exact magnitude haha!) that it seems like nothing could ever get you down. I'm coming to realize it's ok to not always be the energizer bunny of bubblyness lol (I always took not being happy as a white flag of defeat). But acknowledging your feelings, even if no one else will, feels so rewarding! Everyone loves to be acknowledged (some more than others lol) and the same goes with our feelings! Sure happy and bubbly like to be the center of attention, but all our other emotions like anger, disappointment and sadness like to be noticed from time to time too!But we also know you can't dwell on those feelings either, it's good to acknowledge what's bothering you and put it in the little cubby inside your heart that it belongs :) It's sad knowing you're babies don't have the 'all American family' you dreamed of having, but realize the life they have is still filled with so much love, happiness, adventures (as we've seen in your little documentaries you post!), closeness, sillyness and unwavering love in your little family unit! I come from a single mom (God has my life been interesting all 24 years I've been around!) that raised 3 kids on her own since I was 10. We had so many struggles but we endured them together and I swear to you (now I'm crying!) that I would relive every single one of those hard times again because it got me to where I am today and the bond I have with my mom, brother and sister. My mom had admitted to me once that she felt so scared leaving my dad because she knew she would become the soul provider to her 3 kids (she had been a stay at home mom) and she was so afraid we would resent her for taking us away from our house, our friends, basically everything in our young lives to move to a different state and have to start new while facing the obstacles that come with being a single mom. That is anything but the case. Even at our lowest points (when we first left my dad we lived in a motel room for a little while until my mom found us a house because we had no family that would take us in because they didn't support my mom's decision) we always had each other, all snuggled up to one another on that king size mattress in that motel room telling silly stories of how we would eat pizza with our toes when we found a house! The bond I have with my siblings is soooooo much stronger and the respect I have for my mom goes sooooo much deeper because of the lack of the 'norm' we experienced as a family.You may not see that now Kandee and you may feel what you have to offer you're babies isn't enough, but believe me it is with a heaping spoonful of more where that came from! So yay Kandee for acknowledging the sadness you feel in your heart today, but know it's ok and know that you are a strong person that can overcome it as best you humanly can! Don't ever be afraid to blog your true feelings, you have an endless network of supportive friends that will gladly lend you an open ear, a dose of sympathy or an ounce of encouragement!

I talked about you on my blog, if you want to take a look, go topregnancyjoyandotherthings.blogspot.com

It's funny because you wrote about the Nat King Cole song "smile" and we talk about this song very often with my man (I wrote about that today too!) and his vision of life is so close to yours, that's probably why I like reading your blogs, espacially when things go wrong at home, it makes me realize that I have a great husband and I should smile more about things instead of complaining. I am French, and you know that French people complain A LOT, it is like a national sport here!!! But still, I really love your philosphy...

I just wanted to let you know that you are so beautiful and have a wonderful personality! You seem like such a wonderful mom too. Your children are so precious and adorable! I am 19 years old and an aspiring makeup artist like yourself and you inspire me so much! I am hoping to attend one of your glaminars someday if you still continue to do them in the future. Just wanted to let you know how awesome you are and how much your blogs and videos make my day. Much love to you and your family!

thank you Kandee for shining the light of love on life's dark places. sometimes that light hurts our eyes, but it's really the only way out of the blackness and i am so grateful for people like you that use their voice to help others who are broken. all my love to you!

I log on to each of your sites more than once a day, I thoroughly enjoy visiting you, it has been over a year since I have discovered you, and I never get tired of logging on to your sites, yup thats right, I visit each of'em !

I graduated college, soon to be about two years< insert anxiety> and have still not landed a job in my chosen career. Very scary, sad, and very unsure of the future. Llfe is very trying and can feel very unfair sometimes.

My first year living away from my mother was when I attended college, she was very sick, and in my second semester, she lost her life to cancer. I truly never believed this could happen, she is my Mom and I needed her, so it was decided,so I thought. Her voice could wipe my tears away with one word!

My aunt, one of the most uplifting, faithful spirited persons I know, a lot like your self, told me that it is okay to just have a bad day.....

So I have my days... and sometimes maybe more than I should! It is persons like YOU who reminds us to be HAPPY and too have some FUN, so that our next day brings us joy!

Hi Kandee, I know the loneliness and pain you feel. Yes, in our weakness God is most strong. He allows trials and tribulations to enter our lives so that we seek Him and are transformed. He loves us too much to keep us the way we are. I read your blogs because I think you're a REAL person and because you are a Christian. Your advice is not of this world and I can take a lot of what you say into consideration. Believe it or not, I've applied some of the things you've said in my life. I'm trying to be more of a ray of sunshine to those and actually smile more. I know when someone smiles back at me, it warms my heart. You've even brought back that creative that use to live inside of me. I'm reconsidering so much and following my "dreams" as you said a long with praying and seeking God's will for my life. You've taught me to be passionate about what I do and I hope I can find that happiness one day in whatever I pursue. I love you bunches Kandee <3! God is at work in you.

Kandee, this post really gave me so much hope! I even noted down the sentence you posted on facebook 'what seems IMPOSSIBLE...is just something that's never been done before'. Love it! I also feel the same way as you do MANY TIMES but I also find courage in that God has good plans for everybody. Maybe our everyday struggles are there for us helping become more stronger and are constantly reminding us to take courage! :)but I'm not worried about you Kandee, because you're incredibly strong and have the biggest heart that enables you to deal with everything bad that comes in your way! And you have the power to encourage others and pour out so much love that really makes a smile on everyone's face!hugs&kisses to you!

Amazing Kandee! What I found in my brokeness is that when I try picking up the pieces myself , I end up leaving parts of me behind. So I started letting God sifting through the rubble of my brokeness, and in the end I turn out to be this great mosaic piece... Beautifully broken.

Every time i read these post i feel inspired by them i feel alone alot of the time ...I am alone alot of the time but when i read these kind of post you put up, those feeling melt away and i look at my life my scars and i say they aren't a indifference to me because look at Kandee J. your so beautiful on the inside and out you still are willing to share your life with us even though the web has some mean ass haters on it and i just think that as long as your a awesome and humble person then maybe the world will come around :)

was having a bad day until I stumbled across your YouTube channel and blog. Thanks for this entry. You're a wonderful individual--thanks for sharing these thoughts. Also thanks for sharing your amazing talents with us. I'm loving your tutorials!

Thank you so much! Feel the love Kandee, I feel the love. That"s God shinin right through ya. It would seem that the only way you can have all that hope is through God. My heart would crumble if my babies had to go away intermittently as well. I had the reverse situation, terrible childhood, but by ONLY the grace of God my kids get super steady household. Thank you for the hope darlin!

Kandee, your words are so beautiful and inspiring! Please keep typing what you feel in your heart, God put those words in there for a reason!! We do need to hear it, and I love reading your blogs, they always warm my heart and put a smile on my face :).

And God bless you and your family! Congratulations again on your new little cupcake, she's adorable!!!!

Kandee you ALWAYS have something interesting or wonderful and encouraging to say! You really should write a book. you'd sell the mess out of it haha.

i just want to remind you of how wonderful you are and how many people you touch. i have never even met you but i feel like i am your best friend. You are by far one of the most admirable people i know. Beautiful on the inside and out and has a heart of gold to go with it. Your sweet little family and babies are so lucky to have such a wonderful mother.

Keep on keeping on Kandee we love you just imperfectly the way you are and we all think your great and wonderful.

There is a song that I really like, and that says everything that I think of the world, and everything that I need to go on. It criticizes but at the same time tells us to fight (well, this is how I see it ^^). Today I listened to it and it remind me of you. I'd like you to hear it.

I love you Kandee, you don't have to worry that we'll stop reading your blogs ! Nobody is perfect and even though you may have a boring or whatever blog, we all understand because we are all imperfect and that just draws us closer to you because we'll be able to see the real you and the real stuff that goes on :) You're a perfect friend and I hope to keep makin' blogs so I can read em' !! :D hahaha

Thanks, my beloved. I so needed to hear this, it blessed me more than you'll ever know. I just wish life wasn't so hard...that it got easier. Just when I want to give up...I hear something like this that renews my strength & my hope once again, so thank you! I love you and i pray for you guys all the time...I miss you more than words can say!!!

Kandee. I first began reading your blogs and watching your videos for your art. I now follow because of your Art. A week since the birth of Cupcake, haters before.... Kandee -- life is beautiful. If you have just a smidgen of PPD, know that your true fans are also your friends. Friends defined by today's reality. Different from what we grew up in. Parent(s) home when we came home from school. One mom/dad shared by all. So what. Our children live the love we bring them. That's what matters. Xoxox

I am always so inspired by not only your phenomenal talent, but by your optimism and hope. In fact, you have inspired me to follow my heart (and dreams) and blog about it. As vulnerable as it maybe at times, I have a feeling that it will lead to good things. I believe this because I see how wonderful you are to your fans and how wonderful your fans are to you. Believe me, I am not starting this blog as a way to get fans; actually just looking to inspire others like you have. I would be so honored if you would check out my blog at http://adventuresofaformerfatgirl.blogspot.com/

As I mentioned, I JUST started it, but will be writing often and updating frequently. Whether you check it out or not, thank you for the inspiration. God bless you and keep smiling!

Kandee I love you so much! I don't want you to take that weird at all please. It must be weird to have people that you've never met tell you how much they love you! I found you a few months ago and you have brought so much joy and happiness to my life. I love that you love God! I have another guru that I follow who I think is amazing but she does not believe in God. It makes me sad! Thanks for sharing your life with us. Thanks for being so special! I thing God that he directed my path to cross with you! Blessings to you Kandee and your family <3

That was beautiful....That was a reminder to me that, when we are at our darkest hour all we have to do is to ask GOD for help and comfort....he is there and knows all that we're going thru and all we need to do is ask for his help......sometimes i find it hard to ask because i feel i'm not worthy for his help....BUT i know in my heart that things will get better.....THANK U SO MUCH KANDEE for just being u and sharing your heart will us all!!!!

Thanks so much Kandee for your words of wisdom and comfort. I for one needed to read that and I am sure there are others who do as well. You truely are an insperation and a gift from GOD. Thank you so much and I hope you have a wonderful tear free day. Unless they are happy tears. :)

I really can feel your words, they so helpful really Kandee you cannot imagine how good medicine your are for my heart I really feel you so close even the distance and not knowing you I feel you are such a real great person xoxo

Your blog is the first I check on my news feed, everyday!! You have the most thought provoking, kind hearted and inspiring blogs - everyone is like a fun little adventure in the land of my friend, Kandee!! In fact, I was working on a blog today about the people who inspire me, and I wound up writing a whole paragraph about how much YOUR blog has changed my life!! You're the best bright spot on the internet, Miss Kandee - please don't ever, ever change!!!

Like the other girls are saying, Your blog is the first place I go! I am 23 and pregnant with my first baby too. I look at you inspired, not because of your artwork, or your pretty pictures, but your tendancy towards kindness and your boldness to share your love for God.Good role models are far and few between but you are the perfect example of how a modern woman can be full of love and spirituality too. I see your sucess as a blessing and testimony of how God never fails. Your family is so precious and I hope you continue to be filled with the eternal peace that cant be bought but only given through the charity and graciousness of our savour. Thank you for all that you do Kandee and all of your positive inspiration!!! <3

I have never posted a comment but was inspired by your words today, much like the other comments I read, I was feeling very down today and felt so guilty about it, that when I read your post today I cried and it felt like as if you were feeling the same way I was today and you gave me strength to feel better and give my family the love they need. I always read your posts and love seeing the pictures of your baby, I know what it's like to be up all night with no sleep and no shower! I look forward to your posts and thank u again for being that friend I needed, god bless you.

hi, kandee in a way i can understand the struggles u face and im so so so so so so happy tht u have let the lord do his incredible will towards u! im so happy tht the lord brought me to u! i always look forward to saying "huh, i wonder what kandee johnson is gonna blog today,let's see and i am never bored.you inspire me to be a better person!! i love tht u have let god do his will in u and ur family! may god bless u and the rest of ur days!!! <3 from madi

Smile though your heart is aching Smile even though it's breaking When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by If you smile through your fear and sorrow Smile and maybe tomorrow You'll see the sun come shining through for you

First, congrats on your new addition. It sounds to me like your hormones are racing a little after your pregnancy, which is normal. None of us are perfect but you seem to cheer everyone up with your smile! Don't ever change♥♥♥♥♥

Sweet Kandee, I am not a mother YET, but I have 8 nieces and newphews who I love more than my life itself so I know how you feel when you kids arent with you. my nieces and nephew sense when their aunt is sad and they know how to make me laugh and smile and there isnt enough money or the most expensive gifts and houses to replace that kind of genuine happieness. I dont know you and came across you by typing in makeup artist kits in youtube just this month and i love you. Im 28 yrs old and not even my only big sister or parent has ever inspired me the way you have. "imperfects are perfection" you posted that, and it will stay with me forever. your children are an extension of you and thats all that matters in this life. and i cant wait to experience it someday soon. Keep doing you. I wish you the best life has to offer, happieness, love and success to you and your shorties and darling new babygirl XOXOXOXO

There is simply not enough space in this little comment box to tell you how much I appreciate you stepping out in your faith like this. So many people don't have the guts to even talk about their faith, let alone post it on the internet for millions to see. I wish you all the happiness and treasures that God has to offer. He is so amazing and he created you for a SPECIFIC reason. He knows and loves every single little piece of all that you are. Never forget that, Kandee! Thanks so much for all you do. Lots of love and blessings :) <3

I literally gasped when I saw this post. Something happened yesterday that made me lose my faith in myself. I posted on Facebook. "My heart is broken." Later that day my daughter and I were painting and listening to Glee... the song, "Don't Stop Believing" came on and my daughter said I should pay attention to it. And tonight - I see this message from you and I can't help but feel like it is such a personal message to me. Thank you so much for just being you... bless you and your family and your new baby Cupcake. Laurie Leigh

Kandee, It's time to write a book. I know I would buy it. and I love your glue picture. :) Your so inspirational to me and when I'm feeling bad about something from school (im 13) I come to your posts to help me:) Thank you! And your cupcake is so adorable! I love her

People, including me, think your life is perfect because you are always so upbeat about everything. You inspire me to find the good and happiness in everything I see. I catch myself rethinking how I react or respond to different situations because of the things I read on your blog or see on your videos. Thank you for that!!

Kandee, I've been following you for a while and I've never posted a comment before, but even if you don't read this I want to put it out to the world how much you have helped me with your encouragement!!! Thank you, it makes me so hopeful that there are people like you in the world, willing to give so much love and open their hearts to strangers. Here's some love back to you and your family may God bless you and your beautiful children, I hope you can always continue doing the wonderful work you do!

Kandee, you touch my heart is so many ways! I'm going through a really though time right now. And I can't decide what to do. I want to go back to school for cosmetology at the Aveda Institute. The only problem with that is there isn't one around where I live. So to make this dream a reality I am going to have to move away from my husband & 2 babies for a year. Its a hard decission to make, even with all the support from my whole family. If I don't go then I get stuck at some deadend desk job that will never fufill me. I don't know what to do!! But this post really spoke to me & I thank you for that. You were right there when I needed you! Thank you I love you Kandee!

kandee i cant even begin to tell you how much i needed to hear this today. i have been so down the past couple days..so it was nice to hear this. your blogs are far from boring and i for one love love love them i always check your blog to see if there is a new one ever night..i always want to see what you have to say=) with so much love ally=)

Gosh kandee, I mean this from my whole heart, I wish to meet you at some point in my life. I read/check your blog everyday it is saved in my favorites. I really can't explain how much love I have for you and its crazy because I just know you from Youtube and your blog! You really make my days better and You are incredibly special and just.....I don't know..everything good balled into one!! I think I am going to write you a comment everyday on here so you know you have someone always reading and always thinking about you and your precious little family. Hope you have a good day :)Kimberly

p.s. if you ever get a chance when you read this can you say a tiny pray for my kitty Max? He's very sick and is hospitalized..he's so special to me and is only 9 months. :( It really takes a toll on me..Thank you

There's a great song by Josh Wilson called "before the morning" it's a beautiful song reminded me of it when I read your blog. you tube also has the story behind it, its very touching! Thanks for your words of encouragement :o) know that there are people praying for you its great that you are also sharing your faith and not afraid to regardless of what others may think. Keep smiling :)

KANDEE I am in the same boat with you. I understand, i really do. I have never felt whole when my kids are gone with their fathers kids here kids there.... It sucks sometimes... I always wanted to have that perfect family. Mom and dad together kids all tucked in bed... But my life ended up far away from being perfect... But I tell myself love your babies and they will love you back. But just no this you are a good person and you have thousands maybe millions of people to back me up on this...

You make me cry I don't like to hear you sad... Because I wish I could give you a super big hug.....

2 corinthians 12:9 puts it very nicely "...My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness..." Many times we endure hardships and suffering so that we may also be a comfort to those suffering in the same way. Remember we are only here for a short time, we are only temporal beings, so let's thank God for each day we are given especially with those we love and cherish and keep our eyes and [hearts] fixed on the prize!

you have no idea how much you inspire me everyday! I left a SUPER successful career in Los Angeles to move up to Santa Barbara to chose love, get married and start a family (we still have a year or two to go for that)... But I have been so lost and struggled so much since ive moved. I though I could do it- i would moved and land right away back on my own two feet... Well, its been almost two years and I never realized how much of my identity had ben wrapped up in my success in the music industry. It's been a long hard road- but I have a lot of love around and just want you to know HOW MUCH you inspire me to keep going turn it around and make magic happen some place else doing something new.

oh kandee.. please dont feel alone.. u have the love of so many people with u :-*lately i have been feeling so depressed and confused with my life.. i have faced problems since childhood.. my parents could not give me a proper up bringing.. they are divorced now and i live with my aunty.. everyone around me is so cold.. :-( their behavious just gets me down all the time.. the only thing that makes me happy is my boyfriend.. but m not even capable of giving him all the happiness and support that he has provided me.. :-(

i have been using glue for allot of time...and it is funny because guysare not even the main reason, but somehow i wakeup evrey day with a smile because i chose it that way. It is very hard, yes but i cant do much about it most of the times so i move on and smile.One of the first things i do in the morning is to visit your web sites, yes both of them, just because i can deeply feel your honesty. With all my flaws, to all your flaws, a very big complement for i now howhard it can be.I dont have any kids but beside the fact that i was raised by a single mum and that am a kindergarden teacher,i canfeel your pain because i can relate to someparts of it.You are wonderfull.Best wishes

I don't know what to write to you anymore... I can't write everyday how amazing you are... you'll get spoiled .. haahaaa.. xDBut that is true.. you are amazing and beautiful from the indside-out!!!!I hope that all your days will be full of suhshine and joy!

It's nice to see your pictures and videos.. and how you don't have snow there.. for us it's hard to walk outsice, because there's waaayyy too much snow.. :)

kandeeYour words are so powerful. Your honesty and openess is why I, as well as many others, keep coming back again and again. You are like the best friend,caring mum, wise granny all rolled into one! You make my heart smile .....thank you

im so glad you are a positive person, you can pick yourself up when your down.thats strength.

and im so glad you have such belief in God. i believe that this life is a test from God, test of patience, of strength, of character. Passing these tests will not only lead you to become a better person, but it will also give u a special place in Heaven. so like you said, hang on :)

i wish i could give u the biggest hug ever and squeeze u tight...but anyway just know that im sending u a big warm hug now !

Kandee, who knows if you'll ever actually have the time to read this..but I just want you to know how much your posts like this and positive outlook on life impact my own life. I have been suffering from anxiety and depression off and on for a couple years. Some days I just feel like this day is so bad, it has to be the last; not because I want to end my life but because it just feels like how can someone go on with such a heaviness? Your videos and blogs always bring a ray of sunshine to my stormiest day. I hope you know how much of a difference you're really making! This post especially had me thanking God because though thousands of other readers might say the same, I feel like this was written for me. It just boosted my strength just a little bit more. Thank you so much for being you. I'm so glad I stumbled across your channel when searching for hair dying tips!You are really a joy. And Jesus sure has blessed you greatly. And I can only imagine how proud of you He is. Again thank you so much for being so wonderfully you!God Bless, you are in my prayers.

I'm so happy that you have wrote this :'). I have had such a hard day today and was about to sit down and cry like there is no tomorrow but after reading this you have cheered me up and i'm not going to let anyone step in the way of my dreams. I love you kandee. My love to new baby and your family :) <3

I never leave comments, but felt led to this time. It occurs to me that many people probably liken you to a celebrity status. Why? You're beautiful, smart, funny, loveable, sweet, kind, etc. You have a dream job and even get to work with celebrities.

What's unfortunate is that all too often people idolize celebrities. They believe an illusion that these people have PERFECT lives, when in fact they struggle with the same things we do. At times they even have it harder than we do and are falling apart behind closed doors. I really appreciate that you are trying to open the eyes of some of your readers that there is no such thing as a perfect life. True perfection can only be found in Christ. It amazes me how God can use anyone in any walk of life to be a witness for him and there is no doubt he is using you, your career, and your family to show others his love, mercy, and grace. Your blog is a wonderful platform for this.

Thanks for the inspiring words, Kandee! Speaking of aching hearts and imperfections, my Husband and I have been trying to have our own little Cupcake for 3 years now with no such luck. Both of our fertility tests came back great with nothing wrong so we have what is called "Unexplained Infertility." How lovely, haha! Next week we will be trying our first Intra Uterine Insemination. I'm glad that you have your children to hug and hold when your heart aches. I don't have children, but I have a Husband that I cry on. It just goes to show that we can't all have everything we want all the time. Sometimes patience is a great virtue, but it sure is hard sometimes. Anyway, congrats on Cupcake Johnson! And wish us luck next week! Take care of your darling self! :)

Amen sister!!! you are speaking such strong and uplifting words to me right now:} A big hug n thank you from me to you! Have a great day!!! ****FYI you are never boring...i look forward to checking my e mails in hope there is a new post to read. Lol..its too much fun

Wow kandee its like you knew how i have been feeling. Your words are so inspiring and i really love what you said. You are so tight no one knows any ones hurts or sorrows no one is perfect and with god everything is possible when you just believe and have faith.....Thanbks so much for your kind words of wisdom.

I always come back to read your blog, reading you has made my day so many days! I always talk about you with my mom and friends, about how happy i feel after reading you. Please keep doing this blog, it inspire me a lot!! LOL

Your blogs make me feel so much better! You're right, nobody has the perfect life but reading your blog makes it so much better! Knowing someone as amazing as you is "not perfect". You are my inspiration and my idol. Good luck with your new baby too!

Imperfect? Nooo..I think you have looked SOOO beautiful and couldn't be more perfect in these past few pregnancy updates. Yes, even the close up of your face in labor. Glowing, healthy, happy, and I love the freckles too!

Thank you for these inspiring words and YES this is much much better than any make-up tip. Thank you for letting us into your perfectly "imperfect" life ! This is what makes you such a strong, independent woman. I really hope that you can see yourself through our eyes,feel our admiration and respect !

i read your blog almost every day, and today i have been having such a horrible day..ive been crying, trying to reach the dreams that i took a step away from...when i went down the wrong path, and finally realized that i need to gather the courage to separate from the person dragging me down...

feeling lost and crushed..to unexpectedly read your encouraging words...provided me the glimmer of hope i really needed. God knew i needed encouragement and He sent it through your words. thank you, thank you so much.

Wow Kandee. You are the most beautiful soul. I could tell when I watched your videos that you had the joy of the Lord in your life. It is great that you don't let your hurts get you down. Yes, you have had times of pain but gold is refined by flames. Thank you so much for all you do. Keep it up! I love the verses you use, and that you are not afraid to shine your light. I strive to be like you and your beauty tips are awesome. I got the brushes you had a deal with and I LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM. Love you are your little family, normal up bringing or not.

I wont say i know how you feel, but itstead i will say im there feeling the same way, single mom, two children, alone, depressed..we all go through these peaks and valleys, and yes, only God knows how each of us feel, we feel alone when we are sad, but He is there..angles are watching over us...mental health is so important and don't be ashamed of mental health problems they are no different then a physical illness, mental health is a physical illness as well. Some need medication others don't everyone is different, but you are not alone..I wrote Kandee a couple years ago at my lowest, and started doing You Tube video's, which was therapy for me. I am sad a lot but I look at eachday as a happy one, sometimes it works, sometimes not..but smile and know you are loved everyday..I love you!!xoxoshannon

What a beautiful blog. The thing that gets me through the tough times is knowing that God knows how much we can handle and only gives us challenges in life accordingly. Having God to do life's journey with is the only way to do it. Keep smiling Kandee because only when we get to heaven will we find true joy and happiness all the days of our lives...xx

I love your post! I'm new to the make up artistry world and I've heard so much about you. This message was so inspiring, I can see why you have many followers! I will definitely stay tuned, I hope to learn many tips & tricks from you as I continue my education at Academy of Glam, in Florida. If you haven't already, check it out!

I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me. philippians 4 13 Kandee this is my favorite passage that I keep in mind during hard times. From a 17 year olds point of view you are a great role model and you made my heart smile. I hope this comment can make yours smile also :)

Kandee, thank you for your encouragement and bold proclamation of the truth. Sometimes I wonder whether or not I should be interested in the make-up and fashion industry as a Christian. Sometimes, it seems shallow enough that I shouldn't be wasting my time. Maybe I should be learning Hebrew or Greek or just do "something big."

Thank you for the reminder that God should impact all the areas of our lives...even the little ones.

You are an AMAZING WOMAN KANDEE! So strong, full of love and so generous to always be giving us(YOUR READERS) such love and happiness, when you have things that weigh so heavy on your heart and mind. You already know this is the path God set you on for your journey. Sometimes it may be an easy walk and other times you may have a mountain to climb. He gives us all the tools and supplies we will need all we have to do is have faith and trust in him and journey on... :)

You truly are a inspiration, the warmth and happiness you radiate on us is a gift! SO thank you Kandee!

Kandee you are such an ispiration to me already but reading this has made you my idol. I was holding back tears as i tried to read this. It is a beautiful, caring writing piece. I am so happy that this is out there in the world to help people like me, to keep holding on for that better time to come round. Thank You xo

Beautifully said, Kandee. You, my young friend, have a way with words. :) May God continue to strengthen your spirit and fill you with hope - He is forever faithful and trustworthy (and I love that I can ALWAYS go to him for comfort and to wipe away my tears!).

Kandee, thank you so much for writing this. I can relate to everything you are saying and it makes me feel better that I may feel alone but I'm not. There are other people out there that feel the same sometimes. :)Keep up the good work.

Kandee.... I can feel Christ's love just pouring out of you for everyone. For your kiddos, your family, and all of us. You have a very special gift from God of loving unconditionally. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.