Shaking it like a polaroid picture

Remember back when Glamour had the Girl on the Bottom of Page 194 Lizzie Miller? It seems that we take two steps forward and three steps back when it comes to the glossies. Witness this latest post on Marie Claire’s sex and love blog, straight (and apparently without being vetted by a sane editor) from the mouth of Maura Kelly, who objects to the new fat people tv shows like Mike and Molly and Huge:

I’d be grossed out if I had to watch two characters with rolls and rolls of fat kissing each other … because I’d be grossed out if I had to watch them doing anything. To be brutally honest, even in real life, I find it aesthetically displeasing to watch a very, very fat person simply walk across a room — just like I’d find it distressing if I saw a very drunk person stumbling across a bar or a heroine addict slumping in a chair.

Oh, before you get upset about this, you should know that Kelly insists that she doesn’t hate fat people, and in fact, has some friends who are pudgy, so really, it’s because she cares so much about our health. Oh, ok then! She also offers the advice that if we exercised more and ate whole foods, we’d lose weight in a jiffy. Fat people never do any of those things! Maura Kelly saves the day! As usual, my hardcore crush Lesley nails it:

…you’re not required to find all fat people attractive, certainly, but Kelly’s comments above are dehumanizing and offensive and really have no place associated with a widely-read publication such as Marie Claire. This is not simply because their candor subverts the standard feel-good ladymag message of “Love yourself! (But not too much!)” but because sentiments like those expressed in Kelly’s post are bad for everyone: they make fat people feel terrible about themselves, and they make thin people terrified of becoming one of those disgusting fatties they so revile.

After reading Ms. Kelly’s blurb on her alumni website, I was most struck by this paragraph:

She struggled with anorexia growing up and credits the psychologists who worked with her for helping her to overcome the disorder. She was so thankful to her psychologists that she decided to major in psychology at Dartmouth so she could one day help others in the same way. Upon graduation, Kelly reread Catcher in the Rye and decided that being a psychologist no longer appealed to her and what she really wanted to do was write a book that would “make people feel less alone in the world.”

After reading the comments on the Marie Claire blog (seriously, go read them and cheer), I feel bad for Kelly. Her sizist screed against fat has obviously more to do with her own eating disorder (which she wrote about and examined in depth in this NYTimes article) and body dysmorphia than any actual concern for the health and welfare of her common man. Check out her anecdote where man told her that she looked “athletic” and she mentally twisted it into being called fat. Also, I’m absolutely betting that the next time she bumps into Marie Claire’s pet plus-sized columnist Ashley Falcon in the elevator, it’s going to be awwwwkward!

Good luck with that making “people feel less alone in the world” thing, Maura! You certainly have bonded the fatosphere in outrage and disbelief.

47 Responses to Marie Claire Thinks Fat People Are Gross

I’ve just finished commenting on that article (twice, I was so mad), I think I’m #138.
What also upsets me about this is until about a year ago I would have agreed with most of what she wrote; the brainwashing in our society is so pervasive about these things.
I would have just gone like “of course, it makes perfect sense, I mean EVERYONE knows being fat is terribly unhealthy, right? She’s not being a bigot or anything; she’s got a perfectly legitimate reason to hate on fat people.”
I’m sure that a lot of people think the same way just because they don’t know any better, and it’s articles like these that perpetuate the whole cycle and drum these ideas into the general public.
It was just random coincidence that I discovered this community during an unrelated Google search and was curious enough to start reading.

Yeah, I thought that. I thought “Is this the first time we’re going to get to see the inimitable ‘Some of my best friends are …’ ” statement rescinded and revised to past tense in print and in real time?

Wow! I used to think that Marie Claire was a quality magazine – not any more! Maura Kelly should lose her job, as should whoever approved the publication of this drivel.

And you’ll note that she doesn’t even know the basics of the topic. In her “apology” she says, “Morbid obesity is defined as 100% more than their ideal weight.” Um, no it’s not. The medical definition of morbid obesity is a BMI of 40 or over.

I think it really sucks that articles like this are not edited before being put into publication. It is very offensive, to say the least. However, I do agree that she is probably projecting her own feelings regarding her weight onto the general public. Sounds like she has a few issues to work through with her therapist. But should she really work through her issues in a national magazine?

I literally just came over here to send you the link to this same article. Oh. My. God. I don’t know what’s worse, the original article or the half-hearted attempt at an “apology”. As a person who has lost 125 pounds, it absolutely was not as simple to lose weight as that author suggests, nor is it simple to lose the 40 pounds I have left that haven’t budged all year. I’m tired of people acting like all you have to do is move 30 minutes a day and eat less and the weight will magically fall off.

The fact that Marie Claire even lets this woman post on their website is just one more reason I’m reconsidering renewing my subscription. That and they give one page to plus sizes. ONE PAGE IN THE ENTIRE MAGAZINE. At least Glamour throws in a plus-size model every now and them. Marie Claire doesn’t.

As for the show “Mike and Molly,” the more I watch it, the more I like it. Sure, it’s not perfect and a couple of the characters need to be reworked, but it has moments of great candor and heart. So there, Maura Kelly. Watch a show before you criticize it.

Here is what is making me completely bonkers about the whole business. In the article – and in the supportive comments – is the notion that the show is “implicitly promoting obesity.” This, not two paragraphs after she mentions complaints that the show is reliant on fat jokes. How does that work? The show is promoting obesity by making fun of the characters’ obesity? Zwah?

The very presence of fat people on television who are doing anything other than weeping and fainting on treadmills apparently is a promotion of obesity. Who knew? Why have the hardworking bloggers of the fatosphere been spending so much time looking at medical research and putting together adorable outfits? Apparently all you have to do is show up and smile.

I left three comments over there, all of which were deleted. Not sure why, I didn’t use profanity or call her names like a bunch of other folks did, I simply let her know neither she nor Marie Claire would ever see a penny from me (she’s apparently working on a novel) again. This was entirely too threatening, I suppose. This article made me furious.

Yeah what she said in that was crossing the line. However, I don’t agree with the statement “Marie Claire thinks fat people are gross.” I don’t think it’s fair to judge the whole magazine based on one employee.

I agree and disagree with you, Ashley: when I wrote for a large media corporation, I sometimes was told that my posts wouldn’t be published or parts of them would be omitted because they interfered with the message of the corporate entity, most of the time for just reasons (and sometimes just because I have a potty mouth). When I write for BFD, I’m very aware that the most readers only recognize it as a BFD post and not a “Weetabix” post.

Maura Kelly can say whatever she wants as Maura Kelly on her own blog, Facebook, Twitter or whatever, but when Marie Claire blog editors allowed that to go to posted under a Marie Claire masthead (and it sounds like they were complicit in the tone, judging by the first part of the post), then the piece is sanctioned by the publication. Simple as that. If it had raised red flags, they wouldn’t have posted it. Period. So undoubtedly Maura Kelly wrote some super assy shit that came from her own little eating disordered brain, but I know for a fact that there were other people who had to sign off on this post.

I think the biggest concern here is that the entire post is operating from the assumption that fat people don’t read Marie Claire, even though they have their token fat girl (who is all of 23 and super adorable that I want to adopt her).

Thanks for this great write up about the Marie Claire article. Might I suggest losing the link to the article though as I’m of the opinion that driving any more traffic their way is exactly what they are looking for.

Oh, thanks so much to Maura Kelly for her comments. My husband and I and probably half of America have weight and body image issues and this self rightous skinny has cleared the problem up so succinctly. Now she can take her skinny self and her handful of perfect friends to an island somewhere and tell each other how perfect they all are.

Nasty comments about being skinny, fat, whatever, are still nasty and hateful. You could have made your point just as well without the skinny body shaming, considering the fact that Maura Kelly has had and apparently continues to struggle with issues surrounding her body image.

Her article is all over the net and on television. It was talked about on “The Talk” yesterday. OMG Sharon Osbourne had a comment for the writer and even tried to reach the editor with no results. I think that she bit off, no pun intended, more than she can chew. The fall out from this is going to be a boon for CBS, I think. I love that show. Love who you love. We are all perfect how we are!

BTW, just wanted to add: If Maura Kelly ever showed up @ my house, she would die of gross-out. Hubby & I have been happily married nearly 37 yrs., we’re both varying degrees of fat (i.e., I’m proportionally fatter than he is), and the dude cannot keep his hands off me!! ;)

So I was just browsing around and stumbled across this and I have a question has it ever occurred to any that maybe just maybe some people like being big??? As for me growing up I was nothing but bones and I hated it I hatred being small. Now I’m 22 at 260 pounds and I love every bit of it I love having curves I love every inch of me and despite what Ppl think I am very healthy I don’t have any heart or lung problems my cholesterol is perfect my sugar is perfect and i don’t have any achs or pains. Now to me I am perfect as for her I think she just hates people who are happy with themselves because she never was and never will be. She doesn’t understand self love she doesn’t understand y some one so big could be So happy and she struggled so hard to stay small and she was still unhappy I wouldn’t expect any thing different to come out of a self haters mouth.

At the risk of incurring the wrath of BFD readers, when I was 22 I didn’t have any medical issues or aches or pains, either. My cholesterol and sugars were perfect and I was the picture of health. Now at almost-45 I have joint and muscle pain nearly everyday, my cholesterol has skyrocketed, I have developed intermediate uveitis in both eyes, and have been borderline diabetic for a few years(sugars have just recently dropped to normal level since I lost 20 pounds so far this year; still trying to lose more because I refuse to start medication for high cholesterol!). All I’m trying to say is, just because you’re OK now doesn’t mean it won’t catch up to you eventually.

So all those years in which going out in public felt like a daily acid bath because I was ashamed to be seen visibly existing as a (gag, hack, barf) FATSO . . . those were the years when I was doing it right? And these days, when I refuse to listen to that little voice that tells me I should hate myself for not looking like my ideal . . . right now I’m doing it wrong? I even quit Weight Watchers. Bad fatty. Baaaaad fatty. I will go slink off into my room and hate myself now, decently out of her sight.

Or, you know, not.

It would probably blow her mind, BTW, if she found out that my ideal is still fa-fa-fatty, such a fatty boombalatti. Obeeeeeeese.

Though I firmly believe that everyone’s entitled to their opinion- this woman is truly insane! what on earth prompted her to make these outrageous comments!? it’s almost hysterical, if it wasn’t so offensive.

There’s one part of all of this I find funny – imagining the sheer astonishment she must feel at the fury she has unleashed. I would guess that she had no idea of the backlash she would provoke, when she first posted the article.

I imagine her going to check if there have been any replies to her new post, and finding hundreds of angry ones having cropped up; a red, fiery glow from the screen on her face, while an expression of horror dawns across it as she realizes what she’s done to her career. Mean-spirited as it is, this scenario makes me laugh. Anyone who put something asinine on the internet and never realized what kind of flak they were going to get for their own stupidity – not just at having these thoughts, but at sharing them with the world – I have absolutely no sympathy for.

I’d feel bad for her if she wasn’t taking her own issues out on the rest of the world. As it is, I just think she’s a grade A asshole. Hating yourself does not give you a free ticket to hate on others. Moreover, I’d argue that making a conscious effort to NOT continually judge every single out of place hair on everyone else’s head will actually provide a lot more room for self-love and acceptance.

But what am I saying? Self-acceptance would mean accepting yourself even if you were, or got OMGFAT! And everyone knows that’s gross! Gah, I just can’t even – this article still makes me turn into flames of fury.

I actually think that Kelly has a valid point. She didn’t phrase it too well, but I don’t think its just her ‘using her personal issues to attack fatties’.

Society IS promoting obesity. For as much as fat people get abused, they are also being soothed and uplifted and comforted with this idea that fat is ok. Every day there is a new study linking obesity to something genetic, something environmental, something cultural….we’re losing track of personal responsibility, of culpability. ‘BEING FAT’ isn’t the problem – thats an aesthetic thing, and we do need to stop focusing on how people look. But the reason BEHIND being fat? Usually, its poor diet and lack of exercise. (Yes, I know you will all hate me instantly for saying that, and I’m sorry).

But its true. Its just the basics of how the human body works – you put more calories in than you put out, you gain weight. This isn’t to say that its necessarily BAD – people, particularly women, are naturally much heavier than the images we see on magazines and television. But what IS bad is this fanaticism that ITS OK TO BE FAT! Nobody worry! Lets bond together and just support each other! Its everybody elses problem that they don’t like that we’re fat!

For MOST of americans/brits/aussies, being fat is an indicator that you are in poor health. And we shouldn’t say ‘thats ok! people come in all sizes!’ Just because it happens, because you are that different size, does not make it healthy. Just as we don’t want to, and shouldn’t, raise our kids to believe that all women should weigh 90 lbs and all men should have six pack abs, we shouldn’t raise the next generation to think that its ok to become morbidly obese. Its not healthy. (And please, please…..I know that some of you are raw vegans and bike everywhere – you are the exceptions. You are the educated minority. John Smith down the block is not the exception, he is the rule. I really don’t want to hear that I’m pulling this ‘its not healthy’ thing out my ass, I’m not. Its a fact.)

I think the author of that post may have been let go. There’s no announcement of it on the blog, but there also have been no entries since Oct. 29. I think it’s a daily, M-F blog, so the lack of entries, following all the negative publicity, smells like a result… just not a result that anyone (Marie Claire) wants articulated, as that would surely stir the pot again.

Let me start this off by saying that I’m not tiny and I’ve seen some beautiful women who are twice my size at least. Also, I think the comments that were made are harsh and ugly. However, If someone is severely obese, its unlikely that they are in outstanding health, and I can only imagine that that was supposed to be the point of the article. I’m sure there are exceptions, but not a majority. Comparing heroin addiction to over eating isn’t so far off. Behavioral addictions and eating disorders can be the hardest to overcome. I’m not saying everyone who is obese over eats, but I’m sure it happens. I’m all for accepting people of every size as valid and worthy human beings, but I don’t think a body image that is potentially dangerous should be simply accepted as a norm in the name of equality. To me, its just as disturbing and unpleasant to see someone who is far past the point of just being simply over weight as it is to see someone who is malnourished and anorexic.

Alyssa and Bee, you’re wrong. You can be fit and fat! This blog is for people who taut the virtues of health at every size. You are generalizing and putting all fat people into the same category. You cannot look at someone and determine their health. Yes, some fat people are overweight because they eat poorly and don’t exercise but those are not indicative of ALL fat people!