After Boston bombing, paranoia's OK

Neighbors hug outside the home of the Richard family in the Dorchester neighborhood of Boston, Tuesday, April 16, 2013. Martin Richard, 8, was killed in Mondays bombing at the finish line of the Boston Marathon. (AP Photo/Michael Dwyer)

Once there was a time when gambling meant mixing wine with a belly full of beer.

Now thereís a serious gamble: Do I go to the ball game? Do I go to the movie theater, or do I just stay home, safe and sound? And am I really safe there?

These are questions you have to ask yourself now. How important is that game against Atlanta? Is it worth it? Or worse yet, is the moment when you think you can wait for the movie to come out on Netflix.

There have been times in my life where I would sit at a function such as church and let my mind drift off to wondering how I would get out of there in case of an emergency. Of course my exit involves raging panic and doing just about anything to get out of there.

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They say if we donít continue with our everyday lives, the terrorists (foreign or domestic) win. Well, to be honest with you, Iím not the most competitive guy in the world. And it leads to my latest malady: agoraphobia. I have developed over the years a fear for crowded places. Long ago, I learned to have my back to the wall if we go out to eat because I donít want anyone behind me.

Plainly spoken, I fear the real world.

Paranoid? Of course Iím paranoid. But with good reason: There are people out to kill me solely because of my country of origin, the Great Satan, the United States.

So I live a small-town life full of small-town activities. I avoid crowds, always have. How can the terrorists win if I donít play the game?

Because terrorism can happen anywhere, not just in big cities.

They win by bombing neighbors of a state I happen to live in. They win by shooting up Watertown.

But they also win by shooting mass numbers of our children at school. It seems no matter what we do, they win.

I have no hope of a safe place to seek shelter. Nightmares can happen anywhere. And thatís what terrorism is: a violent nightmare that comes true.

So we have to be diligent. Be watchful of our surroundings. It can happen here, right at home.

I canít put my head in the sand, thinking the real world of threats and violence is far away, so Iím diligent and Iím suspicious. You canít call it paranoia anymore. Itís called being a member of todayís world, where anything can happen.

In Boston, in a whisper of time, peopleís lives have been altered forever ó if they were lucky enough to survive. Watertown, a place not much different than places we know, was traumatized for more than 24 hours.

I know this is not my typical the-world-is-a-freaking-nightmare funny piece. But there is no way to be funny with the topics in todayís headlines. And I hope you wouldnít want me to be my sarcastic, witty and charming self, because real people are dying.

Like a lot of people, I can say the terroristsí acts are working, because Iím fearful. Iím fearful of the future. If itís like this now, what will 10 years from now be like?

I worry about family and friends who live in major East Coast cities, including New York and Washington, D.C. And I worry about the safety of Main Street, USA. I worry about the schools, malls and anywhere where people gather in large numbers. And we can now add sporting events to the list.

The beauty of Boston and Watertown was that most of the information came from the average aware citizen. So we can change the world. We can save lives by reporting anything unusual ó like unattended backpacks.