I need advice please

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So I have some questions. Basically I think I have an ed(?) but thatís what Iím here to ask you about. Basically every single day I think about food and how I donít want to eat and I plan on not eating lunch. If I didnít have to eat in school or sit at the dinner table at home I would choose not to eat pretty much. But the thing is I eat every meal. I skip breakfast on purpose because itís all I can do. But this is where I say my mind is consumed with wanting to lose weight, being thin, not eating, and PLANNING on not eating- even though I always end up eating. Also- when I eat I feel disappointed with myself. Iíve never purged although itís sometimes a strong urge. Iíve tried once but It didnít work and Iíve never done it. This has been going on since July. My main question is do I need to seek therapy for this? I feel like a coward because Iím not bad as other people and I still eat lunch and dinner every day. I just donít know what do To honestly.

You need to seek some help from others discuss this and with the people you love and you are close to. They will surely help you. But if you are too uncomfortable to do it, see this journal. This has many suggestions for your query. Get well soon.

Yes, you should talk to someone about this. If your car's check engine light comes on, would you have it looked at right away or wait until the engine explodes? I wish I'd asked for help right away. My body has permanent damage because of this horrid illness. Please get help before it gets worse.

__________________

~ From The Hours ~

"If I were thinking clearly, Leonard, I would tell you that I wrestle alone in the dark, in the deep dark, and that only I can know. Only I can understand my condition. You live with the threat, you tell me you live with the threat of my extinction. Leonard, I live with it too."

Eating disorders can be extremely taxing just because of the thoughts that tend to run rampant through your head.

I was actually in a similar place as you when I was living at home in middle and high school - not really feeling like I had a real eating disorder because I wasn't 'as sick as some other people'. The people I talked to about it just blew it off as no big deal. It wasn't until I got to college that things started getting bad. I can't say what would or would not have happened, but I genuinely wish I had worked through this problem and these thoughts before coming to college where my ED was given the chance to get out of control (so much so that I had to drop out of college twice).
It may seem petty or small to ask for help for this now, but please do. It may not seem like it, but it is the right thing to do in this situation.

Good luck, my friend!

__________________
Yes. Jesus is the reason I am still alive today.

Diagnoses:
MDD, BPD, PTSD, OCD, AN-BP

(I don't define myself by my personal alphabet up there, but I put it there so that maybe somebody won't feel so alone )

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