Submissive /dominant question new to this

I've met a guy online we've been talking a while he's asked me to be his sub. After much thought I agreed. We've discussed certain things but he has asked for money from me as a gift to show my commitment. This flagged up warning signs would a true dominant ask this ??? I also asked about safe words and he said he'd never needed them before . I'm new to this he's not. If I disagree the sub dom relationship is over. Not sure what to do so advice from other dubs or doms would be gratefully received.Thanks in advance x

The first thing most doms do is discuss limits and a safe word and/or signal. This is definitely a red light. He may just be thinking he can do whatever he wants as a Dom... I don't believe he is truly going to have best intentions in mind, and doesn't sound like he's too concerned about safety either. The money thing doesn't sound right to me at all, I would not send him any. x

Firstly being a sub is not all about blindly doing everything you are told. its more than okay for you to say no to something without 'breaking' some imaginary sub/dom rule. Submission is a gift that you choose to give to a worthy dom, you can take it away at any time, hence why any self-respecting dom would instist on you having a safeword so you can let them know when you are not comfortable about something. Theres something very sensual and fufilling in serving another person but please don't ever believe that subs 'have to' just obey everything without thought for their own safety and mental well being, all good doms will also have your safety and mental wellbeing at heart. Afterall if you want to play with your toys, you dont break them, you look after them. xx

Thank you for all taking time to reply to my message I guess my inner gut feeling tells me to not to proceed with this guy. I'm in no rush so will. Make my decision.Thank you for the advice I have taken it all on board a d it's good to have more knowledge. X

+1. There is literally nothing to think about here. Stranger online asking you for money and if you don't give it to him your 'relationship' is over? No, this is nothing like a sub/dom relationship. Not at all.

If he's not a scammer, he's clearly just an idiot that thinks being a dom means being a controlling dick who gets to take advantage of you. Again, nothing like a sub/dom relationship. You are both equals when deciding how your relationship will work; just because one person is submitting doesn't mean the other can control.

Money should NOT be exchanged for this, safe words should be a NECESSITY, especially if you're new to this and with a person who doesn't know you, your limits, preferences, body language etc. Honestly, it has scam written all over it.

He's either a con artist or a douche who has no real comprehension of how the Dom/sub dynamic works in a true relationship.

Give him a wide berth, you deserve ten times better. Say, for instance, someone who knows what they're doing...

Firstly being a sub is not all about blindly doing everything you are told. its more than okay for you to say no to something without 'breaking' some imaginary sub/dom rule. Submission is a gift that you choose to give to a worthy dom, you can take it away at any time, hence why any self-respecting dom would instist on you having a safeword so you can let them know when you are not comfortable about something. Theres something very sensual and fufilling in serving another person but please don't ever believe that subs 'have to' just obey everything without thought for their own safety and mental well being, all good doms will also have your safety and mental wellbeing at heart. Afterall if you want to play with your toys, you dont break them, you look after them. xx

I agree with everyone else, get out now. He's chancing his arm, you deserve better than that, sorry you had this bad experience but you did the right thing flagging this up before it went any further x

+1. There is literally nothing to think about here. Stranger online asking you for money and if you don't give it to him your 'relationship' is over? No, this is nothing like a sub/dom relationship. Not at all.

If he's not a scammer, he's clearly just an idiot that thinks being a dom means being a controlling dick who gets to take advantage of you. Again, nothing like a sub/dom relationship. You are both equals when deciding how your relationship will work; just because one person is submitting doesn't mean the other can control.

+1. There is literally nothing to think about here. Stranger online asking you for money and if you don't give it to him your 'relationship' is over? No, this is nothing like a sub/dom relationship. Not at all.

If he's not a scammer, he's clearly just an idiot that thinks being a dom means being a controlling dick who gets to take advantage of you. Again, nothing like a sub/dom relationship. You are both equals when deciding how your relationship will work; just because one person is submitting doesn't mean the other can control.