It’s 1 am. I fell asleep at 9 pm and woke up again just before midnight. And now I cant go back to sleep!

I feel like I have to write about this before I forget about it… and it’s one worth documenting I feel. Zayan had his first swimming lesson! Registered him for the 2-4 yr old swimming lessons. It’s £4 per lesson for 10 weeks and you have to pay for the full course! Sooo I hope he would go through with it!

We bring Zayan swimming at random and sporadic times. In the last few months, he probably has gone once or twice a month. Basically if M is off and free to bring him. With Ayman around, I just sit and watch at the end of the pool. Now, Zayan is a scaredy cat when it comes to swimming. He clings on to us and wont let us go. Wont float. He would hold on to a floater and be dragged around. He likes the water and enjoys “swimming” but becomes koala like once in the pool.

As I have free time now, I decided to enroll him so he has something to look forward to and use that energy of his. Plus maybe he’ll stop being scared in the water.

There were only 3 kids in the lesson today, him included. The instructor came to him first and asked him to go into the pool with her. He looked at me and went ‘Mamaaaa…’ in a scared voice. I prepped him beforehand saying I’m not going into the pool with him but a teacher will be with him. He dutifully nodded each time. I offered to walk to the pool with him but the instructor just took him and he followed her willingly.

Once in the pool, he is braver than I anticipated! *heart swells* He used this long floating thing and swam BY HIMSELF with it. They did various things like float on their back, kicking and launching self from edge of pool, lotsa things lah. Each kid demonstrates whatever the teacher wants them to do whilst others wait at the edge, Zayan holding on to the edge with all his might and kicking away as instructed. And other times they would swim with the floating device thing. A lot of it, the instructor has to hold a part of his body whilst he does it (like floating) but I’m so proud he actually did it. He’s such a koala bear with us and now he’s just doing it! Peer pressure kali.

Every now and then, whilst waiting at the edge, he would call out for me. The instructor would ask “why? what’s wrong? Is everything ok?” and he’ll just say ok. He looks so small compared to the other two!! Esp in his swimming suit. Hmm, maybe I should get him a more pro/macho swimsuit… the current one is in bright blue and yellow with fishies on it. He’s had it for a year now and still muat!!!

Anyway, for the most part, I was smiling inwardly and feeling like the proudest mama on the planet. Outwardly cool pulang saja. You see I’ve never really seen him perform/act in front of other people/kids that’s not family. I dont know how he is with the kids at childminder. I’ve seen him interact with kids but not seen him perform. And especially in things outside of his comfort zone… My heart was in my mouth a lot, macam “ehhh mau kan ya buat tu???”, constantly worried he would demand to stop and he would surprise me by just going through with it. Zayan, you were pretty awesome today.

He did get out of the pool after 20 mins cos he said he wants to pee. I secretly think he just wanted to stop the torture but he did pee. When he peed, he said “no swimming” and wanted to take everything off (he is not a fond of the swimming cap). Convinced him to follow through (“You MUST finish this lesson even if its for a few more minutes!” I figured if he ended it then, he’d be scared to go next week) and he went back to the pool.

The two kids have been taking lessons with the instructor for awhile now, so they were much more confident and was basically having fun in the water. One asked “when are we going to jump in??” So they had a few “jumping in” before class ended, which Zayan loved. His mouth went all wide grinning away. When the lesson ended, he didnt want to go! Haha fickle jua anak ku ani.

All in all, he was happy. I asked him if he was scared, to which he replied “no… nice, Mama.” Sooo hopefully another good session next week!

Love, me

PS I carried Ayman with a wrap the entire time. He slept through the whole thing.