MOIETY IS THE SALT IN THE SEAWARD BREEZE. IT’S THE SMELL OF SHAMPOO IN A STRANGER’S HAIR. IT’S THE SWEAT IN YOUR EYES, THE HOLE IN YOUR NEIGHBOR’S FENCE, THE UNEVEN SIDEWALK THAT TRIPS YOU ON YOUR WAY TO WORK. IT’S DEEP IN THE WOODS, IT’S ON THE TIP OF YOUR TONGUE, IT’S ON THE HIGHWAY SEVERAL HUNDRED MILES AWAY. IT HAS SEX IN THE MORNING, WADES IN WATER, WEARS CHAP STICK, AND DOESN'T LIKE TO HEAR THE SAME JOKE TWICE. IF YES IS AN OPTION MOIETY DOESN'T SAY NO. MOIETY NEVER BRINGS A CELL PHONE TO A DINNER PARTY BECAUSE IT HAS NO USE THERE. DANCING IS MOIETY'S REPLY WHEN ASKED WHAT SHALL WE DO TONIGHT.