Wednesday, July 05, 2006

The Pope Loves His Queen

Tonight Pope Innocent the 3rd is feeling nostalgic about our spring tour of Berlin and northern Germany. Maybe because the World Cup Final is this coming Sunday, in our beloved Berlin. Maybe because his favorite team, Team Italy, is in the finals. Maybe because the Pope's leaky heart is pining for the most beautiful woman in Berlin, his Queen Nefertiti. I suspect the leaky heart is the real reason we're looking at pictures of the Queen for the gajillionth time.

I must admit, the smile on his face, the moment he first met the Queen, warms my innards. The picture of him sleeping with the queen, even though they both demurely left their hats on, I'm not so sure of. I'm thinking a few Hail Mary's for that possible transgression couldn't hurt. The Pope, however, denies the need for absolution and maintains his innocence.

To keep the Pope from moping about the separation from his lady love, I've filling his summer social calendar. Highlights include a tour of Lily Dale, the world's largest Spiritualist community, where the Pope hopes to have his palm read to find out if his love-line is etched or faded. The Pope has also been invited to be guest of honor at the July 24th meeting of the Lady Bugs Knitting Club of Lancaster, New York. He will get to read the minutes from the previous meeting, proudly wear a miniature lady bug pin on his hat, learn the difference between a knit and a pearl, and tally the 15 cent "swearing fines" at the end evening.

But the Uber-Highlight will surely be on July 30th. I've billed it as "The Night of a Thousand Queens". The Pope is practically fainting. On that magical night, our friends, Jason and Chris, will escort the Pope and me in regal style to the infamous Club Marcella in downtown Buffalo. For the Sunday night Drag Queen show.

I've promised the Pope there will be Queens-a-plenty,(most wearing exceptional head gear) to help take his mind off the Queen of Hearts. We're already planning our outfits. We've secured the haute couture Papal Purse. The Papal Hat we've picked needs a few more sequins and feathers. And since the Pope's Papal Robe is practically a dress, we're saving money and saying, "good enough, then". Because there will be women at the show with a different agenda than mine, the most important accessory I'll be wearing is my "I like boys" pin.

No doubt, we'll have a smashing time at the Club. It will the do the Pope a world of good to be among royalty again.