I have always told people that man does his best thinking while on the toilet. So I figurse since I dont have a lot of free time in my life to blog, what better time to do it than on the pot. So here are the free flowing thoughts of a man as he sits upon his only throne and thinks aloud.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Breaking News: Some things in life can only happen to me

For the first time I feel as though this blog was worth something. In a recently deleted entry I was able to voice my heart on a situation and much to my personal joy is dealt with. For anyone who read the post, know that I love my brother very much, I made some wrong assumptions about the situation and while all may not be good with work, things are good in my heart with Josh because I know where he was coming from. And now back to me making a fool of myself through this blog.

Yesterday as I stood outside talking with a co-worker a funny story came to mind about my senior year prom. I was a senior, and prom was supposed to be one of the best nights in your young life. I don’t know if this was the best night of my life, but it ended up being one of the funniest.

I got dressed in my tux and headed out to a friend’s house to pick him up and then we were to go meet the girls for the dinner/picnic we had planned for them. I was looking quite sharp and had rented my friends BMW 318 I cherry red convertible with ground effects and sweet rims. I was feeling like the biggest pimp driving down the road with the top down and cruising in my tux. I arrive at my friends’ house and was greeted by a hug from his mom. As she pulls away she notices a white spot on my shoulder, “What’s that on your shoulder?” she asks me. I turn and look, my eyes bulge, bird poop! As I was pimping the ride I got pimped by a freaking bird. There was a huge turd on my shoulder.

Black tux, white poop stain does not look all that good. I called the tux shop and told them that there was a stain on my jacket that I hadn’t noticed when I picked up the tux. I was told by the woman that they were closing in 10 minutes and if I could make it to the shop on time they would replace the jacket for me. I jump in the car and fly down to the rental house. Still open! I run in and told them I was the one on the phone with the “stain”. By this time we had tried to clean it off so it resembled a chalk mark. The lady took one look at the jacket and said. “HMMM it looks like its just chalk.” She then rubbed the mark, licked her fingers, and rubbed the mark some more. I said, “Yeah it looks like chalk” she continued to lick her fingers and rub out the stain to no avail. Her partner brought out a new Jacket for me and I said my thanks and took off, while the woman was still licking her fingers and rubbing the “chalk stain”

I got to the car and almost died laughing with my friend at what we had just witnessed. The rest of the night was pretty fun as well. Right up until the point when some jerk who will remain nameless asked my date for a back massage at the after party. I got pissed at him and left shortly thereafter. This was my prom and I got pooped on by a bird. This could only happen to me.