We've seen many Ashlee Simpson pictures in our day. Some of which are kind of attractive, others just plain annoying. They really run the gamut. This one may take the cake, though, in terms of leaving T.H. Gossip utterly perplexed:

The latest is Saturday Night Live's sassy news anchor, Amy Poehler, who seemed to speak for all of America on last weekend's episode in reciting a serious vagina monologue of sorts - one directed at the exhibitionist Mrs. Federline and other Hollywood actresses seemingly dedicated to pants-free living.

The Hollywood Gossip is proud to bring you Tale of the Tape, in which we break down prospective matchups within the celebrity world that you might never have considered. Because they are pointless, and above all, not real.

Our current match-up features an acclaimed actor we feel like we know personally after his many neurotic, hilarious years on Seinfeld, and some random dude who happens to share the same name, and who we only know because he once got with Britney Spears.

A source close to Vin Diesel says that contrary to Internet reports, the actor was not dropped from the upcoming movie Hitman -- in fact, he opted out long ago.

Rumors circulated yesterday that actor Timothy Olyphant had taken Vin's place after he was dumped from the film. While it's true that Olyphant will star in the film (based on a popular videogame), Diesel was off the project long before Olyphant got the part.

The sexy singer, who's already shown us that she occasionally goes out in no pants, has reportedly been pole-dancing with her new best friend, Paris Hilton. Britney's slutty BFF has been giving her private lessons in her home, reports say.

Talk show king David Letterman has signed a contract extension to host The Late Show on CBS until 2010. He is currently paid $40 million a year for his hosting duties and his deal deal is worth more than $120 million.