Is Your Partner Too Controlling?

I host recovery groups for women with controlling partners. In these groups, most participants begin in some degree of denial about the psychological abuse they are or have been enduring. What they can often identify at the outset is feeling confused like being in a fog and perplexed about what exactly is going on that contributed to this state of mind. I often hear, “I need to get clear about what’s happening in my relationship.” This is a hallmark of the success of psychological abuse: the abuser leads his partner to believe that his partner’s needs do not matter, and that what she is feeling isn’t valid or real. To step into awareness of the abuse, we begin with identifying coercive behaviors in intimate relationships.