The Chinese New year is here. It's a big deal in most feng shui circles. I'm not big on the traditional stuff, but I do find it all really interesting and I like to read up on it so I'm in the know. The new year rings in the year of the water dragon. This peaked my interest because dragons are pretty cool mythical beings to start with. The whole art and imagery of dragons from Asia is amazing. Many years ago I was gifted a small pair of dragons. They aren't my style but they are sooo cool looking. For years they sat on my desk. In one of our moves (we like to move) the dragons were packed in a box and stayed there since. But wait ... it's the year of the Dragon! It's time for the dragons to be unveiled again. (Check them out ... they are pretty cool!)

Anyway, several boxes had to come down from the attic in the process of hunting for dragons. And each box had to be opened ... and each item had to be unwrapped ... until we found the dragons. It was an interesting process ... unpacking pieces of us and our past that we have stored away. (In feng shui, attics are considered your thoughts, dreams and aspirations.) We found the dragons and pulled them down ... and we found some other cool stuff (parts of us) that also don't deserve to be hidden in the attic. And we found some things that still don't fit into our life as it is ... but that neither of us is willing to let go of. That stuff is back at home in a box in the attic.

And then there were the things whose fate we didn't agree on ... should it stay in storage for now hoping it fits into our lives later ... or should we let go it go now?? I'm sure Steve wouldn't have minded to see my prized collection of teapots hit the curb ... (but that's not happening!) And I'm pretty ready to let go of the china, silver and glassware that his parent's bestowed on us right after we were married. Stuff we've moved thru three states and haven't unpacked in years ... stuff I'm pretty sure I'll never use ... (sorry, honey!). But he is not ready to let that go. Those items are from his family and hold cherished memories for him ... and he wants them ... even if they are just stored in the attic. (Ditto for my tea sets by the way!!)

So how do you deal with an item that one person wants and the other doesn't??

Many years ago I did a phone consultation with a coworker ... and this issue came up in a big way. She had recently married a military officer and moved into his home. One of his prized posessions was a model of a fighter helicopter. It was proudly displayed in their bedroom on his dresser. As they combined their lives and living spaces this helicopter kept coming between them. He loved it! It reminded him of his work, of strength and strategy. And she hated it. It reminded her of war, and destruction, and (to her) it was ugly to look at too! What to do ... What to do???

Since the helicopter wasn't leaving (unless perhaps he left with it?!?) I suggested they find a new place for it. The bedroom is a pretty sacred space. It's where you're most vulnerable (sleeping) ... and should reflect peaceful surroundings. It's also where you spend alot of time there (1/3 of our lives!). We talked about moving it to his office, a man room, or a living space that has a more active energy. At least then his new wife would have less exposure to it. I never had the chance to follow up with her ... but I think they must have worked that out between themselves in the end!

As for us ... the dinnerware and teapots are are staying on for a while until one of us budges! And that's pretty much the moral of the story ... If you can't agree peaceably to let it go, then keep it ... but put it somewhere that is agreeable!

Do you have "stuff" in your house that you would like to see go but someone else wants? How have you handled it? Please share your thoughts below ....

sign up here:

Author

Kerri is the founder of Feng Shui Pathways (formerly Holistic Living Resources). Using a combination of tools including Feng Shui, Aromatherapy, Coaching, Organizing and Space Clearing she works with clients to create spaces that are comfortable, functional, supportive and inspiring. Kerri offers workshops and is available for speaking engagements on the topic of Feng Shui.