Episode Transcript: Squirrel Record

[The episode starts with the Krusty Krab at nighttime, the scene cuts to the interior where we see Squidward sleeping at the counter with a magazine on his face, then an alarm clock rings, Squidward wakes up and stops the alarm clock, the scene then cuts to SpongeBob about to flip a patty and then Squidward pokes his head through the window]:

Squidward: It's quitting time, SpongeBob. Go home. [SpongeBob continues to flip the patty] Quitting time! [SpongeBob sniffs the patty, Squidward takes out a megaphone and shouts in it] GO HOME!!!!!!!!!!!! [SpongeBob continues to ignore Squidward and flips the patty, he then looks at his watch]

SpongeBob: Oh my. It's time to go home. Squidward, what are you still doing here?

[Squidward gets frustrated and screams, running out of the Krusty Krab]:

SpongeBob:[picking up the patty] What am I gonna do with you? I can't throw you away. [snaps his finger and puts the patty inside his wallet, then a smelly odor flies in and SpongeBob sniffs it] Bleh! [the scene cuts to the garbage can where we can see the smelly odor is coming from] But I do have to throw away the trash.

[the scene cuts to the back of the Krusty Krab, the door opens and a big smelly smoke comes out followed by SpongeBob who is wearing a gas mask while holding the trash can, he walks over to

the dumpster and dumps all the trash into it, then a book covered with trash comes up from the dumpster]:'

SpongeBob:[takes off his gas mask and picks up a book] What's this? Someone threw away a book. You shouldn't throw away books. [suddenly a big green slimy monster emerges from the dumpster. SpongeBob screams at the sight of it. He then throws the books at it, causing it to fall over. The slime dissolves to reveal that it was actually Sandy] Ooh, Sandy, you're a trash monster?

Sandy: Heck no. I was breaking a record for rooting around in a trash bin. It's all right here in The Guinness O' Ripley Enormous Book Of Curiousities, Oddities, and World Records. [turns page] Look-e here, SpongeBob. Staring Record. 5 days. Most fries up nose. Holding your breath.

SpongeBob: Wow!

Sandy: Yes siree! I swear by the power of Texas, I'm gonna break all the records in this here book!

the floor] Uh, oh. Hold on, Sandy! [takes off helmet] I know just what you need! [SpongeBob gasps and reaches into his wallet to grab a Krabby Patty] A Krabby Patty! [SpongeBob puts the Krabby Patty in her mouth and helps her chew and she rises up like as a rooster crows, Sandy coughs and gasps]

Sandy: I did it! I'm alive! I can't wait to show them experts the pictures of my record breaking feats.

Sandy: Thanks for all your help, cousins! [cousins cheer] See you all next Christmas! Bye!

[the woodchucks were sucked and spirited up]

SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy! What is all this?

Sandy: I've decided to go about this scientifically. I feel with careful planning andprecise delication of appropriate tasks, I can manage the successful completion of the maximum number of records broken in the least amount of time! Book! Picture!

SpongeBob: Got it! You OK? [Sandy breathes fire like Bowser and Charizard, SpongeBob then sniffs] Do you smell soup?

Sandy: What's next?

Record Robot: Largest rubber band ball. [SpongeBob takes a picture, as Sandy lets go of the rubber band ball, SpongeBob gets crushed]

Sandy: Woohoo! What's next?

Record Robot: Most cobras milked. [Sandy milks cobras)

SpongeBob:[laughs] Say "cheese"!

Sandy: Cheese! [SpongeBob takes a picture]

SpongeBob:[nervous laugh] Nice snakes. [gets squeezed]

Sandy: Next!

Record Robot: Most walnuts in mouth. [Sandy gets a lot of walnuts in her mouth]

Sandy: Just! One! MORE! Oh no! [spits out walnuts at SpongeBob] Next!

Record Robot: Most chainsaws juggled.

Sandy: Ok, shoot!

SpongeBob:[takes a picture] Got it! So uh how do you stop?

Sandy: What?

SpongeBob: I said "How do you stop?"

Sandy: What?

SpongeBob: How do you stop?

Sandy: Why that's easy I just stop and run like heck! [SpongeBob and Sandy run] Not that way! [Sandy walks over to SpongeBob who is cut apart from the chain saws] Come on, SpongeBob! Pull yourself together! We still got a ton of records to break! Oh yeah! You're gonna love this one!

SpongeBob: [putting himself together] I don't know, Sandy. It is getting kinda dangerous.