A: One of the greatest times in my whole life. I became the cannoli expert of the world for Oklahoma. We had more cannolis and salamis and cheeses. … I never gained so much weight in my life. I learned a lot from Scooter. You had to be on your toes because he was liable to throw you a curveball or a spitter at any time.

Q: You were in the booth for the George Brett pine-tar game.

A: I’ve never seen such a crazed man in my life. It’s a good thing somebody intercepted him. He was ready to choke somebody, wasn’t he? Good thing he was in shape, otherwise he might have had a stroke! I was doing the color with Frank Messer. I actually got it right, what they were doing when they were measuring with the pine tar being too far up the label.

Q: You didn’t appreciate Gaylord Perry’s spitball, so you sent him a gallon of lard.

A: I think I got the clubhouse kid to get it. I just asked him to get me some pure, old grease.