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Changing Your Attitude

Coach Jana L Beutler, M.Ed.

by Jana L Beutler, M.Ed.Do you
alternate between being “good” at sticking to a sensible eating plan and
being “bad” when you slip? It’s a frustrating but common cycle for most of
us, especially when we consider the self-defeating attitudes that labeling
and acknowledging our “badness” create when it comes to food.

Many
psychologists know that behavior modification strategies--rather than
diets--can help us break this self-defeating cycle and make lasting lifestyle
changes. What is behavior modification? It begins with a change in self-talk
and thought, which helps us change our attitudes about our eating, our
bodies, and our weight, which helps us change our behavior. In terms of
weight loss, our behavior will be reflected by how we feel inside, which will
be reflected in how we appear on the outside. When we feel good about
ourselves, we can’t help but be attractive to others. THIS is the ultimate
goal—to feel better about ourselves inside, so that our bodies and personae
will reflect confidence and light to others.

Enlisting the aid of qualified
professionals (a registered dietitian, a physician, a personal trainer and/or
a life coach or therapist) will make it easier to interrupt old thought
patterns that have affected our behavior patterns. Our thoughts lead to our
actions, so if we can intercept our ineffective and self-critical thoughts,
we can alter behavior more readily, and with more enthusiasm. Following are
some suggestions to help you identify and change your current thought
patterns and behaviors that are not conducive to weight loss success. They
are designed to heighten your awareness and give you a few tools to try which
may facilitate your reaching your goals.

1. Watch Your Language!Do you find yourself
thinking “I will never lose weight” or “I feel fat”? Watch for thoughts that
are negative or irrational, rather than supportive of your goals. Understand
that “fat” is not a feeling. Try to accurately identify the emotion that you
are having that may be driving your need to eat, overeat, or suffer from low
self-esteem. As Dr. Phil McGraw would say, “You are a life manager. You have
only one client, and you cannot hate your only client.” What if your boss
spoke to you the way you speak to yourself? Are you managing your life and
treating yourself in a way that would be recognized by others with
admiration, or should you be fired as your own life manager? Be aware of the
negativity that you tell yourself, and stop beating yourself up.

2. Stop “Dieting”.Be aware
of the negative and positive connotations in the language you use about your
eating—“eating more nutritionally” is different than “being on a diet!”
“Being more active” is different than “going to the gym.” It’s all semantics,
but it makes a difference! Others are more likely to support and
recognize your goals, and you can hear and visualize the positive results of
your behavior (being more healthy) rather than the negative (depriving
yourself of food.)

3. Distinguish Between Emotional and Physical Hunger.Emotional hunger involves eating when you’re sad,
happy, anxious or bored. Understanding when you are trying to satisfy
emotional needs with food can help you find more appropriate ways to meet
those needs. Emotional triggers will usually subside within 5 minutes if you
can make it past the “danger point” and distract yourself with a more useful
activity.Physical hunger, on the
other hand, is a physiological process that occurs every three to four hours.
When you don’t listen to hunger cues, your hunger subsides and your body
begins to slow down to conserve energy (slowing metabolism). It is important
to distinguish between the two—emotional and physical hunger, so that the
reasons why we are eating are appropriate, and supportive of our goals rather
than detrimental to them.4. Avoid environmental attachment to
food.
All too often, we find ourselves in social situations where we are
encouraged—or are encouraging others—to celebrate or socialize with food.
While having a nice meal with friends is great, we need to be aware of
whether or not we are socializing with food around, or eating with friends
around. What is the focal point of your social activities?

5. Use a Hunger Scale.Internal hunger cues--such as a rumbling stomach, a slight headache,
fatigue, irritability and decreased concentration--are meant to remind you to
meet your energy requirements. Reconnecting with your physical signals of
hunger and satiety can help you acquire the internal power to regulate your
food intake, and avoid eating for reasons that are not physiological. Using a
hunger scale can make you more aware of your internal hunger and satiety
cues. Think of 0 as indicating extreme hunger and 10 as signaling extreme
fullness. With the scale in mind, begin to read your body’s signals. Your
target range should be between 3 and 8. If you go to 0, you may eat too much
too fast, particularly since it takes your brain 15 to 20 minutes to
sense that your body is full. You should begin to eat at 3 on the RPH scale and stop at 7 or
8, when you’re comfortably full and satisfied.

6. Neutralize Food.There are
no good or bad foods--all foods are okay when eaten in moderation. Forbidding
certain foods may simply make you want them all the more. If portion control
is a problem with particular foods, try specific strategies--measure out one
serving of potato chips and put the bag back in the pantry; put ½ your “eat
out” meal in a doggie bag before you begin eating; pre-measure and prepare
lunches for the week ahead of time.

7. Do Not Skip Meals.Eating frequently throughout the day (3 small meals and 2-3 snacks) will
stimulate your metabolism. To lose weight, you MUST eat, or you risk
“starvation mode” metabolism slowing. Skipping meals (including breakfast)
can decrease your metabolism. Change your thoughts if you skip meals—you are
sabotaging your success with the myth that it will aid in weight loss.

8. Know your limits, but be determined to reach them.A safe weight loss is 1 or
2 pounds a week, not 20. Thirty minutes of cardio, 3 times per week is
realistic; running a marathon next month is not. Remember, a healthy body
comes from healthy eating and exercising to keep you running smoothly and efficiently.
If you over-train or under-eat, you risk injury and “binge” eating behaviors.
Be realistic with yourself, but push yourself hard enough to feel pride in
the process.

9. Be Supportive, Not Critical, or yourself. People lose weight at different rates. Weight may
drop off quickly at first and then plateau, or vice versa. Your body
composition may change, although your weight may stay the same. The
important thing is that long-term healthy behavior gets results. Reassure yourself that
you are working hard and remember that hard work pays off. Don’t judge your
progress by your weight; instead, acknowledge that during the day or week you
engaged in behaviors that will be rewarded down the road.

10. Reward your behavior, and not your weight. You are probably used to rewarding yourself and
being rewarded by others for losing pounds, rather than for altering your
behavior. Create a system of rewards for the positive changes you make,
rather than the numbers you see on the scale. Make your rewards based on your
ability to stick to your goals, and on your changes in thought. When you are
able to go through an entire day without self-defeating thoughts, you deserve
a reward. All in all, it is important to remember
that your thoughts guide you to action, whether they be positive or
negative.

If you are self-depreciating in thought, your behaviors will
be unproductive, and you will become discouraged easily. If, on the other
hand, you acknowledge small accomplishments: more positive self-talk,
increased activity, eating more nutritionally balanced meals, feeling
healthier, feeling stronger, then your behaviors will reflect that. You will
be more encouraged to continue exercising, you will find it easier to resist
food temptations, and you will gain self-esteem—not because you are losing
weight, but because you are managing your life and your body in a way that is
responsible and worthy of praise—and the weight loss that follows will be but
a side effect of the behaviors in which you engage.

Jana
Beutler, Co-Owner
of Strength Wellness Athletic Training, LLC (S.W.A.T.) and Life in Motion
Coaching, has a
Masters Degree in Educational Psychology, and is a Certified Personal
Trainer, a Certified Counselor, and Lifestyle Coach. She writes extensively
on behavior modification, cognitive behavior change strategies, and
motivation. This handout is intended for personal use of LIfe in Motion clients, and is not to be copied, or otherwise
used without expressed, written permission. (c)1999-2004 Jana Beutler
and Life in
Motion Coaching.