Tony LaRussa pleaded guilty and took full responsibility the other day for the charges of his DUI arrest eight months ago. And the local Florida police department awesomely released the video of his arrest. It starts out hilariously, as he claims that he was asleep at the wheel because he got up early and had only two glasses of wine. Then it gets kind of depressing after he gets put in the squad car and gets further testing at the police station.

True story: Friday, June 15, 2001. The day I graduated from armor school at crappy-ass Fort Knox. I got up extremely early that morning, went for a run, had a little graduation ceremony, then finished packing all of my stuff to drive to California. That night, a friend (commenter "ihopethisgetsmattmoney") and I went out in Louisville. I was driving, so I only had two gin and tonics over the span of two-plus hours, while my friend got loaded. On the way back, with my friend passed out, I started nodding off behind the wheel, and a cop pulled me over on Highway 31W in a stretch of dry county that's dry because a drunk driver killed a family or a busload of kids or something. Not exactly friendly territory. Faced with the possibility of a DUI, I was INSTANTLY wide awake. Then I passed all of the field sobriety tests because I was only sleepy, not drunk.

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Once again, I'll repeat. You make a million dollars a year, have a freakin limo take you everywhere you go. Rich asshole.

11.29.07 at 5:24 pm

Pauly

.093 is what I need to be at in order to function. My all time high is .33 which I acquried the night of the Rocky Balboa premier. But I'm workin' on smashing that.

11.29.07 at 5:25 pm

Big Nabs

Taking out a "busload" of anything would be bad-ass. I was in a bus accident in Jr. High and remember I barely felt a thing; the other car had it's front-end totaled.

11.29.07 at 5:28 pm

hardawayhatesyou

jpanther, thats a great point. but you dont even have to be rich to call a cab.

a very good friend of mine thought he was fine to drive one night in august, 2005. two days later i was at his wake.

/dick joke

11.29.07 at 5:29 pm

swanychitown

Who the fuck is Anthony LaRussa Junior?

Secondly, how is one supposed to walk a straight line with hurricane force winds blowing you all over the place? Hardly an accomplishable task. Here, 70mph winds, try to stand on one foot, meanwhile, juggle these 5 eggs without breaking them and trim my bonsai into a Moyogi…… Asshole police.

11.29.07 at 5:30 pm

Hugh B. Brown

I loved training at Fort Knox. Every day was like living a scene from Stripes, except that none of my fellow recruits were witty, charming cast-offs, I never had the chance to steal the EM-50 for a weekend, and not once did I bang Sean Young. No, that last one took a few more years and a LOT of cocaine.

11.29.07 at 5:32 pm

Pauly

DUI's are for pussies.

So says Josh Hancock.

11.29.07 at 5:35 pm

Enrico Pallazzo

Excellent plug for Ford there!!!

BigNabs, some time in the 80's and entire bus full of kids was killed down there between Lexington and the Ville by a drunk driver…not the funniest of topics. But I think we all agree that if it was a bus full of hookers, it would be OK.

11.29.07 at 5:41 pm

Big Nabs

No shit? I wasn't really trying to be funny; I just figured after my experience it would be fucking impossible to damage a bus.

11.29.07 at 5:43 pm

Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon... Manny Mota... Mota... Mota

Weak, he only blew a .92 and he was hammered. Learn to hold your liquor, kid!

11.29.07 at 5:47 pm

BlessTheDanceTeam

Ah, the good old Dixie Highway. Turn off to go to Louisville and you can see more stripclubs than people. Go the other way and you can see more people than teeth.

Where can you go for a gin and tonic around there besides Louisville? Most places I ever found in those parts only served beer. (and wine coolers for the Navy types)

11.29.07 at 5:49 pm

swanychitown

It's a 0.092 you twats. If he blew a 0.92 he would be dead two times over. 0.4 is enough to put anyone into a coma. If he wasn't a huge drinker, two glasses of strong wine could feasably put him at a 0.092 cause 0.08 is the legal limit in most states without a CDL license.

Yes, he was is a pussy. He's a Cardinal. Those go hand in hand. Along with white patent leather shoes and a Kentucky Waterfall mullet and being from St. Louis.

11.29.07 at 5:50 pm

Pauly

The best advice on drunk driving was giving to me by my Grandfather. He said "Just stay between the mayonnaise and mustard". This is while I was 8, and driving him home because he was drunk. True story.

11.29.07 at 5:52 pm

wacha_talkin_bout_willus

Larussa has the tolerance of a small Asian women. Blowing .93 and being passed out drunk is weak.

11.29.07 at 6:00 pm

ihopethisgetsmattmoney

I wasn't passed out! I was resting my eyes.

11.29.07 at 6:03 pm

Anonymous

Preach, swany. Preach

That .33 put me in the hosital, involuntarily. Involuntarily, only because I was "found" at a bus stop in front of the bar passed out and they called 9-1-1.

11.29.07 at 6:07 pm

Pauly

Preach, swany. Preach.

That .33 I acquired put me in the hospital, involuntarily. Involuntarily, only because they found me passed out on a bus stop in front of the bar and called 9-1-1. I was only trying to get some sleep for god sakes, it was a school night.

11.29.07 at 7:09 pm

Tim

It's a good thing that LaRussa's not some sort of leader or an example for young men.

Oh… wait.

11.29.07 at 7:31 pm

HoHosWeKnows

Dance Team–Navy types don't get stationed in Kentucky. One of the main selling points of the USN.

Captain Caveman–Gin and Tonics are a pretty twee form of celebration, particularly for armor school graduation. I renew my protest of your summer whites insult.

Being that out of it with a .09 is disgraceful. I bought a breathalyzer from sharper image for shits and giggles and I have no problem being fully functional at a .25. And Im 160 pounds. On a side note, that thing is a blast to take out with you, because wherever you go, you are instantly the center of attention.

11.30.07 at 9:58 am

Matt

Gin and Tonics are a pretty twee form of celebration, particularly for armor school graduation.

It was an Army school. Celebrating graduation from that would be like celebrating getting through the third grade after you've been though high school.