I don’t ever really bother women, but when I do I usually just want to talk, I guess since I just so happened to be a straight male that’s not a 10 or a 5 , I get shutdown so fast , I put out lit candles…like damn, I thought I hid my ring

If you spin a fidget spinner
You’ll end up spinning it too fast
when you end up spinning it too fast
It will make you fly away
when you fly away you’ll end up in a tree
when you end up in a tree
You’ll see that your friends are hanging out without you
When you see that your friends are hanging out without you
You’ll run away in the woods because your sad
When you ran away in the woods you’ll see a bear
when you see a bear
it will chase you
when the bear chases you
you’ll build a fort to protect yourself
when you build a fort to protect yourself
You than notice your lonely
You’ll become friends with the bear
When you become friends with a bear, you’ll start to act like a bear
when you start to act like a bear
You will become a bear
DO NOT BECOME A BEAR
NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER

Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suctioned cupped herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband, “Bruce! Bruce!” and he came running in. “Bruce, I’ve bloody suctioned myself to the floor” she said. “S’truth, Sheila!” Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. “You’re stuck fast girl. I’ll go across the road and get me mate Cobber.” They came back and they both tried to pull her up from the floor. “No way, we can’t do it!” Cobber said, “So let’s try Plan B” “Plan B?” exclaimed Bruce, “What’s that?” “I’ll go home and get me hammer and chisel and we’ll break the tiles under her” replied Cobber. “Spot on” Bruce said, “While you’re doing that, I’ll stay here and play with her nipples” “Play with her nipples?” Cobber said, “Not exactly a good time for that mate” "No… " Bruce replied, “But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are a lot cheaper”

Let’s say you’re in high school, and your popularity level was badlsed on what Cheerio you are. So there’s Extra-Frosty cheerios as the most popular kids, the frosted cheerios were the popular kids, the Regular Cheerios as the typical normal kid, then there’s the honey nut Cheerios as the nerds and geeks, and then there’s your cheerio which is the Chocolate cheerios. Now you want to ask this girl who’s an extra frosty, you go up to her and ask her to Homecoming, but she declines. So after school gets out, you go home and rewind. The next day you wake up feeling like a honey nut cheerio, so you go up to her again and ask her again, she still says no. So you go home and rewind again and wake up the next morning feeling like a Regular cheerio. So you go to school and ask her again, she still declines. So you go home and rewind again. The next morning, you wake up feeling like a frosty cheerio. So you go up to her and ask again, still says no. Then you go home and unwind. The next day you wake up feeling like an extra frosty cheerio. Feeling doubtful, you go up to her one last time and ask her. She finally says yes. The next day is Homecoming, and you and your date are on the dance floor, and she wants punch. So she tells you that she’s going to go get punch. She goes and gets punch and is back in 30 seconds. You ask her why it was so fast. She replies with; “Oh there want a punch line.”

Linda and Peter are having sex. Peter goes in and out hard then fast and the begins to taste her tits. Finally, he moves down the the vagina and eats her hard. His rouge is inside her body, loling around. He fucks her hard again and his dick slicks up her vagina. The entire time she is moaning and begging for more. When Linda cums on his penis she begins to lick his balls hard. Peter begins moaning too saying,” Linda your just as amazing at fucking at your sister.”

I’ll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man. and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can I’ll pat you, and prick you , and mark you with my “D” And then throw you in the fire cos you’re now worthless to me!

I’ll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man.
and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can
I’ll pat you, and prick you , and mark you with my "D"
And then throw you in the fire cos you’re now worthless to me!

I’ll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I’m a baker’s man.
and you bring me an orgasm as fast as you can
I’ll pat you, and prick you , and mark you with my "D"
And then put you in the oven for the bitch and me!