Forget the punch line to a long joke, but
assure the listener it was a "real hoot".

Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying
everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

Practice making fax and modem noises.

Highlight irrelevant information in scientific
papers and copy them to your boss.

Make beeping noises when a large person backs
up.

Invent nonsense computer jargon in
conversations, and see if people play along to avoid looking
ignorant.

Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your
backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider
person".

Finish all your sentences with the words
"in accordance with prophesy."

Wear a special hip holster for your remote
control.

Signal that a conversation is over by clamping
your hands over your ears.

Disassemble your pen and
"accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

Give a play-by-play account of a person's
every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.

To really annoy people, stand on a street
corner, pointing a hair drier at passing traffic, and watch it slow
down.

Holler random numbers while someone is
counting.

Take a sock puppet to dinner with you. When
the waiter comes to ask you what you want, consult the sock. When
the check comes argue with the sock loud enough so everyone can hear
you about who will pay the bill, throw him down and say "Fine
you pay!" then leave.