Bossy Pirates: The Mayflower According to Little J

Little J keeps certain toys in the car so that, when I am running my “seriously boring” errands, he can keep himself busy by imagining far more interesting worlds. His current favorite vehicle for imaginary transport during chore time is his toy pirate ship.

Yesterday, we took a trip to the local health food store, where apparently licensed products are as foreign as processed foods. The clerk took one look at Little J’s Pirates of the Caribbean ship and said, “Oh, look at that. Is that the Mayflower?”

Little J looks at me, dumbfounded. I immediately want to point out that he’s a Kindergartner even though he looks six or seven. But before I can, the clerk is leaning into his imaginary playspace and asking, “Do you know what the Mayflower is? Do you know who came over on the Mayfloowwweeer?” Because really, if she says it slowly, he might have an answer.

Turns out he does. Out of nowhere, Little J begins to expound:

“Oh, yeah. Those bossy pirates came over on the Mayflower. They told those American Indians (I swear) that they couldn’t have their place on the ground anymore and those Indians said, ‘Aw hey, no fair, you guys don’t even have a president.’ And so the bossy pirates made a president and they came back and said, ‘Look. We have a president and you have to go to our church now and the American Indians said, ‘Aw, hey, no fair.’ And then they fought a huge battle and a lot people got dead. So they had a big feast to talk about it and they ate and ate, and they got really fat.”

Blank stares all around.

“Well, there you are,” I say. Little J disappears back into his imaginary world, and I am left feeling happy to have seen it intersect with American history for brief moment. Can’t wait for the next installment.