Thursday, March 13, 2008

Stalking pays

Remember my ULTIMATE FRENEMY from highschool? Yeah, that bitch. She's back from Europe to visit her family and she gave me a call asking if I wanna meet up this Friday.

See, normally I would have told her no on accounts that I hate her and that if she were caught in a burning building, instead of calling the fire brigade I will pull up a chair, and have popcorn as I watch the building burn down and cackles everytime I hear her screams from within. My hate have no boundaries. For the record, the Constantly Dramatic One is not nice. Just so you know.

But the thing is.........I have been stalking her blog now for awhile. And I know for a fact that she is having a shitty time in Europe. She only have one friend. She's bored there. She always blog about how lonely she is. And that she thinks her life is going nowhere. All these dreadful entries..... This is for all those years you fuck around with people lives back in highschool woman. Karma is indeed a bitch ain't it?

So I'm eager to see if she was just as pretentious and desperate for attention as she was back in the day. I wanna meet her so that she could lie to me about how great her life is when for a fact I know she doesn't have one. I want her to speak with a European accent when I know she blogs about how European people cannot understand her when she speaks. I wanna hear about all the places she visited in Europe, when she blogs about how she is always stuck in the house. I wanna hear all that. I won't call out on her lies. I will be sarcastic.

Then I will meet up with my friends from highschool who hate her equally and have new stuff to bitch about.Because that's how we roll.

I do know however that she went to Kanye West's concert. She had like 3 massive entries about that. Bet bitch gonna talk about that. No matter, I can just say that I think Kanye is an asshole and that people who listens to hiphop are very sad. It's sad because there is no depth in those music and its utterly shameful that women are into it as well. All these songs ever do is objectifiying women. Strip them out of their rights as human beings and label women as mere sex objects. And then I will look condescendingly at her while I sip my cafe' latte. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

She of course doesn't need to know how I sing and dance to Flo Rida's Low and how my friends and I sing This Is Why I'm Hot everytime we karaoke. She also doesn't need to know that I still sleep with stuff toys.I'm supposed to be more matured and worldly then her people. Work with me.

Also need to look super cute this Friday. It's imperative that I look cuter than her.

Must. Look. Super. Cute.

Shit, I cannot buy any new outfits. It had been 2 months and 9 days now since I last shopped. Promised the Parental Units not to shop till June. Fuck. This is bad. I have to wear the clothes I already have, accessorize to glam it up. What to wear? What to wear? A LBD is pushing it. We're meeting for coffee people. Damn, what to wear? What to wear? This is crucial. I will put on some outfits, take pictures and let my Style Counsellors decide. And when I say Style Counsellors I mean 3kc and Cheesecakeerian. And maybe Tinesh coz he's a girl too.

And maybe I should stop at Benefit's counter for a makeover....Meet up with her with 3 inch of makeup on my face. AHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAH! Okay, that's truly pushing it. But whatever it is: MUST. LOOK. CUTE.

Cuter than that bitch anyways...

Update

Ultimate Frenemy texted me saying she might not be able to make it. What the fuck??????????????? This is bullshit.

21 comments:

you will be cuter than her...hehe! and oh yeah...i love your eyes with eyeliner on it. and a little smokey hint. oh, and i wanna hear all about it after friday. damn it! will be away for camping on saturday and sunday. but still...you have to tell me all about it.and last but not least, i miss you babe.

I'm with you girl. I do the 40 year old version of the same kind of thing, only it's just to get information out of moms that I don't know well about kids that I can't stand and the other moms I can't stand.

you dont have to look THAT cute, you just have to look confident and intimidating, i think you would prefer the latter approach

i can really understand how would you want to tackle this crumbling cookie, you're so going to crush her!

ooo this is exciting!

she indeed sounded extremely sad and lifeless and just so deserve it - even if i dont know how bitchy she was, but then again, you got good judgement of people, i suppose you wont go around calling everyone bitches =)

You know the point when life gets better? This is the moment. When a frenemy does NOT know thats she's going in for deep shit.Get your guns loaded...i mean cannons...BRING THAT THING DOWN! Why the hell would she want to meet you? Its suicidal babe.

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