His thatch of dirty-blond mop, looked nothing, repeat nothing like yours. I have a feeling that when Bobby Jindal talked about the squirrel squatting on your head, he had your hair confused with Fallon’s wig. Your silken dome of golden hair glows from the inside. I presume it’s the glow of your faaantaastic, repeat faaantaastic mind that escapes through the pores of your scalp and lights it up. Fallon’s wig, on the other hand, could’ve been made from the fur that my dog sheds every summer. There was no inner glow, no Trump-energy. Because yyooouuuu are you!

His imitation of your gestures was, in one word, a travesty of the grandiosity that is Trump. They lacked your energy, your charisma, your strength, and your purpose. Your gestures have all of these, and the viewers I am sure realize that with every twin-jab of your index fingers, you make double the point, with every palm-down gesture, you pat the point down in the heads of the bewildered American voter – the point being, Donald Trump is the guy who can actually “Make America Great Again.” At this point, I’d like to mention that the only gentleman who can come close to you in gesturing is India’s home minister, Mr. Rajnath Singh. (Please visit this link to appreciate the similarities.)

Mr. Trump, I am writing to you with the hope that in future, if at all you decide to appear on the Tonight Show, you dedicate a tiny part of your $1 billion election budget to get Fallon a good makeup artist. That will take care of the hair-issue. The gesturing and pouting could be trickier to handle – perhaps, you could coach him personally – and I know you can do it – because yyooouuuu are you!

I hope that you will take cognizance of the issues I’ve raised in this letter, and ensure that your next appearance on the Tonight Show is with someone who is really you.

I would also like to extend an invitation from wifey, mom, dad, and the dog; and from me of course. Be our guest when you visit India. We would love to host the man whose ability to make people laugh exceeds that of Kapil’s.

Wishing you the best for your election campaign.
Anand and Family
(Signed: Anand, Wifey, Mom, Dad, and the Family Dog.)

Behind the scenes:Mom: Puttar (Son,) you’ve added your wife’s name between yours and mine! I knew that one day she’ll come between us!

If you enjoyed this post, find more of my Quirky, Snarky, Malarkey in The QSM Magazine.

Jacqueline…thanks for appreciating my silliness. The family dog was heard telling her boyfriend from the street, “this man I live with, is so-silly nobody wants to meet him so-silly (socially.) So you are right, she too thinks that I am rather silly.

Hahaha! Trump has become quite the entertainer and the part where he says, “I’m going to create jobs in this country, I’m just gonna do it. It just happens.” was hilarious! Enjoyed your open letter very much! Your writing is brilliant!
Cheers,
Tx

He could put both Fallon and Kimmel out of business 😀 Glad you enjoyed the letter – it was written in haste, and I didn’t have the opportunity to mention a few other issues that have been bothering me.

I think Donald Trump adds a lot of color to the election carnival. I think that the CNN Republican debate may dampen some of this trumpthusiasm!
Less thistles and more whistles for this post 😀 Donald Trump is a winner whether on my blog or on Jimmy Fallon’s show!

Oji, in mom’s view wifey is the daraar – or at least the hammer that brought about the crack. Trump mania is a trickier topic – I think the fact that he brings untalkable-issues (immigration – wall on the border, vets, government spending) out in the open. Unlike other politicians who tip-toe around the tricky issues, he speaks about them (as he says he needn’t give in to the lobbyists because he is putting his own $1B into the campaign) – I guess that’s what makes him popular. Whether or not they will vote for him when it’s Republican vs. Democrats is to be seen – and in all probability, given the new mix of American population, if he emerges as the Republican candidate, Republicans may lose…again.

Chitter-Chatter, Pow-wow!

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