The New Grand Theft Auto Is Going To Make Fun Of Scientology

It’s been a bad few months for Scientology. First, Paul Thomas Anderson’s The Master depicted a religion so illogical and insane that even a tweaked-out Joaquin Phoenix caught weird vibes. Then, Pulitzer-winner Lawrence Wright dropped the devastating truth bomb Going Clear, a 450-page laundry list of the various scams, psychoses and assaults associated with Scientology.

And now, Rockstar is here to rub it in. Epsilonism is the Grand Theft Auto universe’s version of Scientology. The beliefs of the satirical religion include that the Earth is 157 years old, that sperm is a lie invented by biology teachers, and that we all come from the same tree.