Star Wars Paranoid: I have altered the deal

by
Chels in
a state of happiness, because why would you want to spend your life in pain and sadness?

Star Wars Paranoid: I have altered the deal.

At the end of The Empire Strikes Back when they’re all at Cloud City Lando is standing at the mouth of an elevator and Darth Vader is inside. Boba Fett and a Stormtrooper are standing motionless off the side with their rifles hugged to their chests.Lando: This was never part of our agreement. Darth Vader: *pointing his index finger at Lando* I have altered the deal pray I do not alter it any further. The elevator door closes.Lando: This deal it getting worse all the time. The elevator door opens and Darth Vader is still standing there but he has a bright pink dress in hand and a bonnet. Darth Vader: Further more. *hands dress and bonnet to Lando* I want you to wear the dress and bonnet. Lando: But this wasn’t part of our agreement-Darth Vader: I have altered the deal, pray I do not alter it any further. The elevator door closes again. Lando: This deal is getting worse!The elevator door opens again and Darth Vader is standing there but he had a unicycle in his hands.Darth Vader: Further more *hands unicycle to Lando* I want you to ride where ever you may go. Lando: *throws unicycle on the ground* I’m not riding the unicycle!Darth Vader: I have altered the deal, pray I do not alter it any further. The elevator doors closes again. Boba Fett and the stormtrooper start laughing silently and shaking their heads. Lando doesn’t notice. Lando: THIS DEAL IS GETTING WORSE!The elevator door opens and Darth Vader is STILL standing there but he has a pair of yellow clown shoes. Darth Vader: Here, *hands clown shoes to Lando* I want you to wear these clown shoes and refer your self as “Mary”. Lando: *throw shoes behind him and it hits the stormtrooper in the head. Boba Fett and the stormtrooper stop laughing and stand up straight again* I’M NOT DOING THAT EITHER!Darth Vader: I have altered the deal, pray I do not alter it any further.The elevator door closes.Lando: This deal is…*puts ear to elevator door* totally fair and I’m glad to be a part of it…*puts ear to elevator door again, nothing happens. Lando gathers up the dress, bonnet, unicycle, and clown shoes and runs off screen*

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