Welcome to the coldest St. Patrick’s Day any of us can remember. Let’s get out and enjoy.

You’ll have to start without me, mind. Not being Irish — I was born in Canada — I’ve never been one to partake of the green-beer novelty that is the modern St. Paddy’s celebration. Indeed, I’ve always sensed something downright wrong about the concept of pretending to be ‘Irish for a day’ by drinking to excess. I am thankful we do not similarly honour other nationalities by enforcing negative stereotypes for a day.

Of course, I may have a Guinness or two, but one need not wait for a special occasion to enjoy a smooth and satisfying Guinness.

Besides, based on the ads that have been airing for weeks on local radio stations, the beer of choice for St. Patrick’s Day revellers is not Guinness but Rickard’s Red.

Truly? Here, I’ve always thought the Molson Coors product was brewed very much in the Molson Coors tradition.

Hence, I recently took the liberty of contacting Molson Coors to ask a simple question: In what way, precisely, is Rickard’s Red brewed “in the true Irish tradition”?

I received the following response, via Facebook:

Hey Allan, Rickard’s Red is an Irish Style Red Ale. Irish style Red Ale’s are traditionally brewed with a slight hoppy bitterness, with a candy-like caramel malt sweetness and signature red copper colour — just like our Rickard’s Red. We make this brew our own by carefully blending roasted malts with a touch of brewer’s caramel for a striking, ruby red appearance and a bold, refreshing taste. If you want to learn more about our beers, feel free to check out our website.

Hmm… you win this round, Rickard’s. Full marks for coming up with a reasonable defense of your “Irish tradition” claim. I wouldn’t have thought it possible.

But I’m still not going to drink your product. I did enough of that in high school. And regretted it.