Judge to Mechanical-Bull Victim: Buck Off!

Remember that lawsuit that screenwriter Aaron Schnore brought against Johnny Utah’s a little over a year ago after he was injured by the mechanical bull? Well, according to City File, it’s been dismissed by a New York State Supreme Court judge who didn’t buy Schnore’s argument that his state of inebriation (caused by three pints of beer) invalidated the waiver he signed. Well, duh. Drunk out of his mind after three beers? What kind of lightweight was this guy? This is exactly why the only place to ride a mechanical bull is the Colorado Café, deep in the woods of Watchung, New Jersey. At the Colorado, there aren’t any city slickers, pretty much everybody knows to wear their cowboy hat and boots (and to go topless) while they’re riding “Buck Off” the bull, and forget beer — right next to the line-dance floor there’s an entire Jack Daniels–branded bar area where waitresses in cut-offs walk around serving Jell-O shots while cover bands dressed as nerds (the Nerds) and Amish folks (the Amish Outlaws) belt out Bon Jovi covers. And this guy gets a lawyer because he can’t handle the bull after three beers? I mean come on, guy — you’re making New Yorkers look trashy!