A local laundromat has closed this week sighting exurbanite repair costs driving down profit. The owner details years of frustration with his nighttime patrons who continue to attempt to put sacks of coins in his washing machines for a load.

Jordan wrote:These kids come in, hungry eyed and pale as snow, wheeling carts full of coins. I tell them, ‘If you’re coming to wash those coins in here you must leave!’ They don’t listen to me, they just hiss and shovel the money in the machines. These kids, they don’t seem to have ever opened a book in their lives, I feel bad for them. They just keep trying. I wish they’d stop. So many machines ruined...

While often the owner, Jordan, was able to pull out a fair amount of money from the gears whenever he attempted repairs, it was never enough to make up for the cost. Other laundromats in the area expressed concern over similar problems, but Jordan’s was the first to close over it.

Jordan wrote:I tried to stop them once, but one of them ate my dog. He was so strong I could not stop him. I just don’t understand it. Why don’t they wash their coins in their bath tubs? Why must they keep trying to launder them? I will ask this all my life.