Posted
by
samzenpus
on Monday July 12, 2010 @01:13PM
from the I-want-to-shoot-like-you-oo-oo dept.

According to a Chinese news publication, soldiers in Afghanistan may soon come up against a deadly new weapon in the war: monkey soldiers. The report claims that the Taliban are training the monkeys to shoot and kill American soldiers. They also claim to have pictures of monkeys holding AK-47s and Bren light machine guns. From the article: "The New York Magazine has reported about this in jest and stated on Friday, 'No invader has ever conquered Afghanistan, and now we know why. The monkeys will not allow it. It was a good effort, but it's time to pack it in. This is no longer a fight we can win.'”

What history are you talking about, actually? Recent US history shows that we have good chances of winning (by winning in this case I'm going to say establish a viable government that we can rely on to keep the country free of Al Qaeda and we can push them if they don't), as long as the public stays behind the war. If the public loses support for the war (like in Vietnam, which probably happened because the army was actively lying and misrepresenting how the war was going), then of course it can't be won.

Now get in there and test that luggage!
Headquarters! what is it? I can't move my lips!
Can't see a thing through these masks
Go go godo watch him go go go
Little Johnny is a walking faux paus
His royal purpleness!

Gil Braltar [wikipedia.org] is a satirical short story by Jules Verne parodying British colonialism. It was first published together with The Flight to France as a part of Voyages Extraordinaires series (The Extraordinary Voyages) in 1887.

The story is set in British fortress and colony Gibraltar. A man, a Spaniard named Gil Braltar, dresses up as a monkey and becomes leader of a group of monkeys living there (Barbary Macaque). He incites attack on the fortress. The attack, initially successful, is foiled by a British gener

If they use monkeys and the US uses robots, we can rig up some Predator drones with cameras, hook the whole thing up to pay-per-view, and then start trucking in the weed, twinkies, Playboy, fruit, female monkeys, oil, booze, and blackjack.

Hey, people can PAY to have the trucks come in. "$50 more and the US gets the truck of bananas."

I've got a better option, let's cut and run, and let those fucks continue to conquer the world.

Clearly, hurling rocks at tanks = conquering the world, while spending billions upon billions of dollars on advanced weaponry and yelling at anyone that doesn't agree with us isn't conquering the world.

And, naturally, trying to convert as many countries as possible to our way of doing things doesn't count as conquering.

So, you keep supporting our troops by encouraging our enemies, and I'll keep killing the fuckers who intend to kill you if you don't convert.

That's funny...I don't seem to recall American citizens being killed by Muslim's on a regular basis until we invaded their countries.

Speaking of Islamic states, let's topple one of the most secular governments in the middle east and let the Islamic fundamentalists vote in a new leader. Nothing could go wrong there...right? I mean, it's absolutely right to demonize Hussein, but don't try to convince me that they were going to come in and forcefully change our way of life. Especially when Hussein and Al Quaeda were in direct ideological conflict regarding secularism.

The attack came in the wake of the intervention of a Multinational Force, made up of Western countries, including the US, in the Lebanese Civil War, to try and restore order and central government authority.

1993

From your link:

These letters made three demands: an end to all US aid to Israel, an end to US diplomatic relations with Israel, and a demand for a pledge by the United States to end interference "with any of the Middle East countries' interior affairs." He stated that the attack on the Wor

Exactly. The only way to defeat terrorism is to talk to terrorists. If one finds that objectionable, talk to the terrorists while they're still concerned, vocal opponents to one's actions. Don't give them a reason to pick up a weapon or start making explosives. If their grievances are valid, then fix them. If they are not, you instantly have the support of the rational world behind you. Easy peasy. Oh yeah, but that doesn't give a government carte blanche to use the excuse of terror for whatever mean

Even if you believe all the hype, propaganda, and nonsense about Islamic Terrorism, we are not, and never were, in danger of being conquered by Afghanistan.

Even if they did manage to create a nuclear device and set it off somewhere in the US, that would have meant we would have lost one city to destruction, it would not mean that we suddenly all converted to fundamentalist Islam.

Do you honestly think that spending a great deal of blood and treasure propping up a deeply corrupt and questionably competent puppet government(that isn't exactly a hotbed of liberalism and enlightenment values itself) is going to have the slightest positive effect in terms of arresting the spread of particularly illiberal strains of Islam?

If so, I'd recommend talking to the Shah of Iran about that.... Or, for that matter, cast your eyes upon our recent successful transformation of Iraq from a brutal se

what you think is going on is completely relevant, because you and many others are thinking it, and voicing it, and influencing those who hear you speak about it. What you think the enemy thinks, however, would be irrelevant. They hijacked planes and killed 3000 Americans before any homes were bombed, so what makes you think there's a chance you can lower their bloodlust? Play out the scenario if the US abruptly pulls out of Afstan. With no pressure from US armed forces, Taliban are able to rebuild thei

You want my true, honest, complete opinion? Because you aren't going to like it.

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

A ground war in these territories is clearly impossible to win. Unless we wipe out every last al-qaeda and Taliban member in the area, then we will never be able to leave. Destroying the whole place is the only 100% surefire option. We need to either ignore what's going on over there, stop playing policeman, and figure out a way to make this

that's the exact sentiment all the critics said about Iraq. They called it a quagmire, the next Vietnam. Guess what. Iraq has been won. Why? Because the people of Iraq themselves decided Al-Qaida were the bad guys, and started helping the US. The same is true for Afghanistan. The majority of Afghans are quite happy with the liberation the US has provided them, and the Taliban have been unable to do anything throughout most of Afghanistan. However, the remnants of the Taliban have been able to establ

Woopdeedoo. Why go there over somewhere like Burma, or Sudan, or any other dozens of other places on the globe who are under just as much terror, if not more? Why the Middle East, where our very presence increases the risk on our own soil?

So, if you are trying to convince me this was a noble cause because of the reduction in civilian death, why choose the middle east over other parts of the world?

Those who can't learn from the past are doomed to repeat it. It never ceases to amaze me how many flag-wavers see the bill of rights as an obstacle to be overcome. I realize full well the futility of bitching about things that have already happened, at the same time, OP's post was about CONTINUING the war. The money that will be spent when we're still fighting this thing 5 years down the road HASN'T already happened. Telling OP to shut up because he takes a stance politically indicates to me that you're jus

First, I'm not even from your country, so you're wrong on the flag-waver call. Second, his post wasn't about CONTINUING the war. Read it carefully. He clearly says "how about a fight we shouldn't be engaged in at all". That's referring to an event that has already passed. He hasn't suggested any means of extracting your country from the shit, he's merely bitching about how you're stuck in the shit, when you shouldn't be. And as I said, bitching about being stuck in the shit only demoralizes those tryi

Note the bold sections. I was referring to the fact that we shouldn't have started these conflicts in the first place, nor should we be continuing them.

He hasn't suggested any means of extracting your country from the shit

Simple. We pack up and leave. Whether we leave now, five years from now, or fifty years from now, they WILL come back. Might as well do it before more American soldiers are killed and taxpayers dollars are wasted.

He's bitching about the decision that was made in the past about entering afghanistan, and has led to the current situation. And yes, you can be against continuing something on the basis it should never have happened. It's called whining. And you can whine about it all you want, but IT DOESN"T HELP!

The time to speak up is before the decisions are made, that is the only time your voice can have a positive effect. If you disagree with the decisions, you express your opinion at the ballot box. The point of electing a leader is to have someone to make the tough decisions, since you'll never get a unanimous agreement from all citizens. You won't always agree with the decisions, and not every decision made will turn out to be the right decision. But once that decision is made, you follow through on it,

The time to speak up is before the decisions are made, that is the only time your voice can have a positive effect. If you disagree with the decisions, you express your opinion at the ballot box. The point of electing a leader is to have someone to make the tough decisions, since you'll never get a unanimous agreement from all citizens. You won't always agree with the decisions, and not every decision made will turn out to be the right decision. But once that decision is made, you follow through on it, and express your opinion at the ballot box at the appropriate time. In the current war, you need to wait until the Afghan national army is trained and armed properly to keep the Taliban at bay indefinitely. Then the US forces can withdraw, and you can bitch about what a stupid decision it was in the first place. To cut and run now will result in the Taliban regaining power in Afghanistan. Do you think they won't try any more terrorist attacks against US civilians at that point?

No, the time to speak up is always, and especially around election time when we can actually replace the idiots making the bad decisions with others who will hopefully make less bad decisions. Saying we should get out is not whining, it's stating the belief that our government should take that action, i.e. do something to correct the initial bad decision that was made. I don't necessarily agree with that assessment, but it's certainly his right to state his beliefs about it. That's why we have free speec

I don't think you quite understand the purpose of the first amendment.

I think it is you who don't understand it, the 1st amendment protects people from being punished by the Government, so if I were to say that Obama take it up the ass from Pelosi, I would not be taking it up the ass from Buba in prison.

Considering that the Taliban, and other extremist groups (all religions) tend to restrict the education of their followers to just enough to follow the dictates of their leaders it is obvious that this validates the adage "Those who do not learn from History are doomed to repeat it".