EDIT: I should mention there is some context here. Ie. I'm on the ace spectrum, a couple of those partners are actually very long distance comets, etc. But it's still funny when looking at those numbers. To think of the mainstream opinion of poly people being just a bunch of sex fiends who can't keep it in their pants, etc. Oh the hilarity.

Preach! Everyone is so busy except me. Hubby's work is insane resulting in him getting home around 1am and my new guy has just opened a business so is all wrapped up there. Your empty vagina is not alone.

Haha, that's funny, but PSA: the other person will have feelings, needs, and desires. They may not want a fuck buddy, or what they want may change over time. Don't commodify people, we're not sex toys!

Edit: /r/polyamory folks. Tell people not to objectify and commodify others in the pursuit of your desires, and they downvote you.

Friends you fuck from time to time is kind of a different situation though, right? What's being talked about above is "Hi, I'm X, I'm only interested in sex, if you ever want anything else or have any other expectations of me, I won't have the energy for that, so I'll have to bail."

Lots of people fuck just for the friction. And as long as they're making sure the other human being is also fucking just for the friction, that's fine and ethical. But extra care has to be taken because, as you and the other poster have proven, there are those who don't fully understand NSA sex, and those crossed wires can lead to a lot of harm.

A valuable point but sometimes people mutually want to be just fuck buddies. Had a fwb who had two girlfriends she wasn’t sleeping with so she had the need for a fuck buddy but didn’t have the time for another girlfriend. Perfectly good for me, she’s hot as hell and I love her to death as a friend but we’re similar enough that we would’ve driven each other completely insane as girlfriends.

Absolutely agree. As long as those wants are clearly communicated and everybody wants the same things, fine and dandy. It's okay to want just to fuck. But as we're social creatures, and others in this thread have demonstrated that the concept of NSA sex is beyond their ability to comprehend, we have to be really explicit in communicating that, so that those who don't want it can avoid it.

Besides, as I say further down this thread, friendship is still a kind of relationship.

That everyone continues to have honest communication with each other, and that if your needs shift, you let the dynamic shift as well. Maybe being fuck buddies doesn't last long. Maybe it does. Dr. Doe has a great video on this. https://youtu.be/mMXI02JvvXE

Amen. I dunno, this stuff always sits weird with me. I know it's a joke and everyone here loves their partners very much and everything, but regardless of whether I have 1 partner or 5 partners, there are 0 people in the world who are obligated to give me sex.

I've had success having ex partners as fuck buddies, but only when we had great chemistry in the sack but not enough personality overlap to make an actual relationship feel really comfortable.

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I've had two of those, and they were both fine people - we just had that unfortunate situation where each of us had little quirks that drove the other batty. So we became fuck buddies, had a great time fucking, and absolutely *knew* that it could never go anywhere else.

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If I can ever find another of those magical relationships again, I'll take it in a hot second.

This is the main thing that people who are not Polly fail to understand. Just because you have more partners doesn’t mean it’s a nonstop sex-a-thon! Quite the contrary: sometimes it can mean less! Hard for people to wrap their minds around sometimes…