Monday, 23 February 2015

DO NOT JUDGE ME or Anyone Else For That Matter!

I copped a real judging a few weeks ago when I was eating lunch with my son at the local shops. It was during the school holidays and whilst I was so incredibly mad about it at the time - I was also somewhat embarrassed by how childishly I handled the situation.

By the next day I was over what happened so the post stayed unpublished in my drafts.

But then watching a friend get attacked by other women on social media the other night, I got mad all over again.

I'm mad at the ignorant woman who called my friend cruel and said she doesn't deserve kids, kids she loves with every bit of her being.

She was called 'cruel' and 'not worthy of kids' because she engaged in a conversation about punishment and consequences on a thread on Facebook. My friend commented about how she didn't let her daughter go to a birthday party because she had been warned again and again about her bad behaviour and she felt she needed to carry through with her threat.

And then the pack let loose on her.

So I got mad at them.

And then I got mad again at the woman who judged me at the shops and I got mad at any other woman who thinks it is OK to judge another mum... or anyone for that matter.

I mean aren't we all just doing the best we can?

Here's what I was all huffy about a few weeks ago...

I grabbed some pre shopping takeaway sushi with my youngest son today and we sat down to eat it together at the communal table.

There was another mum and her little girl about the same age as Flynn already sitting there and so as we sat down across from them I threw a smile in the mum's direction.

Now normally the routine is kind of supposed to go like this. You smile at someone and then they smile back and all is as it should be.

Except she didn't smile back.

She looked me up and down and then eyed off the bright green slushie Flynn was slurping on and rolled her eyes at me.

OK.

So no big deal.

Each to their own and all that.

This woman dressed in Lycra tights and a t-back tee doesn't approve of giving kids fluro coloured refreshments and you know what - that's totally fine. I don't exactly approve of someone rolling their eyes so blatantly at a stranger who just smiled at you so we were all even Steven.

We were munching our way through a tray of grilled salmon and a pack of baby sushi when mid mouthful Flynn pipes up with " Mum, why do some boys love other boys and want to marry them?".

Used to his random questions I simply replied by saying "Well just like a boy loves a girl or a girl loves a girl, a boy can love another boy if he wants to too".

Cue the sniff from across the table and some more eye rolling.

Alright, so clearly I was encountering someone who doesn't see eye to eye with me.

Whatever.

Except this continued throughout our lunch and I was starting to become self conscious about everything I said.

A few more munches and Flynn threw another one at me; "Mum, what would happen if I only ever drank green slushies and nothing else?"

"Well der" I said, "Your eyes would glow green and your nails and your teeth and your hair would all turn green too".

This time there was a shake of the head and a look of disdain from the woman across from me and her daughter who was listening intently to our conversation turned to her mum and said "would that really happen Mummy?"

"No darling" she said to her little girl before giving me a look that clearly said 'idiot!'. "Of course not. But you would probably get fat and all of your teeth would fall out".

Flynn and I couldn't help ourselves, we looked at each other and giggled and the little girl looked across at us all wide eyed and then she giggled too.

The other woman by this stage was not even attempting to hide her dislike for me and she glared at me as she packed up her things and prepared to leave.

By this stage I was mad. Like really mad.

How dare she make me feel like this?

I mean it is one thing to eavesdrop on someones conversation but to be so blatantly rude and judgemental about a conversation you are not even a part of???

GAH!

And so I couldn't help myself. As she stood to leave I turned to Flynn and said "Oh and mate, just another thing..." and with that I shoved a whole piece of sushi in my mouth looked straight at my hater and with bits falling out of my mouth I said "Iths wearly wuuuuudde to twalk wif your mouffull".

Cause I'm realllllly mature like that.

Judgey McGrudgeys.

There is a place for them and it sure as hell is not now and not ever!