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Printed
in Canada

First
printing, 2017

ISBN
9780991912193

Kimberly
M. Quezada

Edmonton,
Alberta

Canada

www.irishyogini.wix.com/authorpage

Acknowledgments

For
the Spirit

On
the physical plane

Beside,
around and within.

A
soft spot to land.

Someone

Something
to fall into.

To
connect with.

Someone

Something
to continue to live, reside, and speak with.

Even
if

One
day

It’s
in a different way.

Introduction

Death.

When
I consider the word, I stumble, either verbally or mentally. It’s
too final.

Death.

I
don’t pretend to be unaffected by the aftermath of it. I have, like
many many people, lost family and friends to the word. As I sat in
funeral homes, churches or hospitals, I cried with those who were
seemingly left behind and yet…there was always a sigh of relief; a
quiet happiness that flowed through me and a mental congratulations
because they had done what might be considered the impossible. They
graduated from one of the biggest education centers of this
Universe…Earth.

I
once heard that people who have died were called back to Heaven
because they were needed in a bigger capacity than what they were
needed for on earth which doesn’t exactly sound fair. These people
were parents or siblings, children or friends, husbands or wives.
Their lives were making the biggest impact on those who knew them and
who loved them as who they were in their human form. They were life
and yet I felt strangely comforted, after the tears had fallen, that
their life never ended. It just began again…in a different way.

So
I don’t prefer the word death.
Anything but death. When speaking to those we may label dead,
I have gained the understanding that the Spirit was never meant to
die; that it continues because it is energy and the energy of our
luvs never quits. They have imprinted part of themselves on our
hearts and minds, never to be forgotten. But I don’t believe they
were ever meant to only be a memory either.

What
if we could come to an understanding that just as much as we wish we
could interact with our loved ones again…that they wish the same as
well and they try. What if we took a moment and just forgot about our
questions and simply called their names to have a talk with them.
What if we poured them a cup of coffee or a tea or even served them
their favorite beer and spoke and, when hearing a reply in the back
corner of our brains, chose to believe it was them answering and
continued to engage in the conversation we just started?

My
first experience channeling someone from Heaven
was Paul Walker. I didn’t know who he was. Only that he acted in
movies I had never been interested in watching. I never asked for an
introduction nor did I ever ask to have ghosts
speak with me. I had experience in channeling Angels and my Spiritual
Council of Light. I have Spirit Guides that I spoke with frequently
but I never considered, for a moment, that my work would take a
different direction; that it would change into communicating with a
human someone. It
was…confusing, crazy, anxiety riddled and doubtful. All these
emotions crossed my mind because I felt I was daydreaming; that the
man standing at my desk at work, a man that
I could only see and
hear was an illusion or a daydream. I struggled with understanding
the purpose of the visit that soon turned into multiple visits until
I caved and gave him the time of day. It took me a few days to engage
in some sort of communication with him. I am an automatic writer.
It’s what I was comfortable with but I had to begin to engage more
spiritual gifts…some that I didn’t realize I had, to make the
communication work. It was a secret that I chose to keep to myself
until he asked if we could share what we were talking about.
Hesitantly, I agreed. It was the start of a journey I could never
foresee but have enjoyed just the same.

Then
the lines started forming. One after the other, I would have knocks
on my door. I would have Spirits from all timelines who just wanted
to chat openly and honestly about who they were as they lived and who
they continue to be. As I carried on with the visits from the unseen,
instead of doubt I felt trust. Instead of worry, I felt supported,
and instead of fear I felt loved. I have made many friends in Spirit.
Some come back time and again. Some only wave from a distance just to
check in. Regardless, channeling these people has offered me
something that I probably would never have gotten if I didn’t
choose to take part in this work.

Peace.

I
cultivated a deeper understanding that we do live on and that we have
the ability to continue to touch people’s lives as we do when we
inhabit our bodies. How incredible is that?

This
is the first book of channeling those that have lived, walked this
earth and continue to do so. These conversations will no longer be on
the website and will only be found in this book. All of these people
have touched my life and shared so much of their love that I am
forever grateful. I have spent much time with those of the unseen and
have become comfortable with their presence as an extension of my
family. This is my journey with them. I have dated these talks. You
can flip through or you can read them in order. It’s up to you. For
more conversations, please check out the blog at
www.irishyogini.wix.com/authorpage. Thank you for joining us. Our
door is always open and you are always welcome inside. I have made it
my personal mission to continue the conversations that were never
meant to end. Events, jobs, vacations, books, articles…all these
things were meant to be memories. People...Spirit…not so much and
for that reason we continue together in whatever way that presents
itself. Right now, it’s with words.

Much
Love,

Kimberly.

Foreward

This
book that you are about to read is filled with an abundance of
channels from so many famous people from the other side that even
Oprah would be jealous of these one-of-a-kind “interviews”. In
fact, that is my loving nickname for Kimberly… “Oprah of the
Dead”. She is much too humble to take the compliment seriously,
which is one of the qualities that makes Kim so endearing. Prepare to
be intrigued by her remarkable questioning skills that respectfully
hit on interesting, yet sometimes, tough subjects. I feel that their
responses will not only satisfy your curiosity about each channeled
spirit, but will change your perceptions and open your mind to an
entirely new way of thinking. I believe this is part of what Kimberly
and her most common regulars, Paul Walker, and her spirit guide,
Simon, hope to get across to the reader.

If
having Paul Walker on your team doesn’t sound incredulous enough,
wait until you read the words of legendary singers, actors, writers,
inventors, creators; the notorious Rasputin, and even a philosopher
and a queen to add to the mix! Not to dismiss Jules Verne, one of the
most profound writers that has ever lived as well as the astounding
Nicholas Flamel, Princess Diana, and Anne Frank, to name just a few.
Even a formidable lion named Cecil! There are far too many impressive
names to list, but I’m certain that you will be as fascinated as I
am.

Trust
me, I know how this sounds. Who is this Kimberly M. Quezada and how
is she attracting so many prominent figures in spirit? I once had my
doubts too, but as I kept reading, I kept learning, and suddenly my
heart and mind were expanding into a place that I never knew existed!
There isn’t a shred of doubt that Kim is the real deal. I happen to
be very fortunate to have many friends that are mediums, but have
never encountered someone so specific, clear and concise with her
direct and detailed messages from spirit. Kim is smart, witty, and a
little sassy, but all of that is wrapped up in the kind of warmth and
compassion that turns sarcasm into loving, teasing banter (especially
with Paul). Eventually, I got to know Kimberly on a friendship level,
and can honestly say that she’s one of the most authentic and
genuine human beings who never ceases to amaze me. She can be a
little shy in person, but certainly doesn’t shy away from asking
thought-provoking questions while maintaining open-mindedness to the
answers received and yet, she holds her own strength of conviction at
the same time. All this is delivered in Kim’s precise, yet
delicate, way with words. I have participated in some of these
channels by asking questions through Kim, and let me tell you
personally, the responses have never disappointed. Quite the
contrary! Paul Walker, Simon, Anton Yelchin, Robin Williams, and
Roger Rodas have all given me amazing feedback that truly made
perfect sense in a personalized manner.

I,
for one, am honored to have been asked to write this foreword because
I believe very strongly in their combined message of “Bridging the
Gap – Who Was and Still Is”. This book is rich in knowledge that
encompasses the belief that we truly never die because we are energy
and we are consciousness, and these never die. You learn that we can
continue to keep that valuable connection with our crossed-over loved
ones and that the separation from them is only a perception. Kim, and
those she channels, are working to shatter the myth of separation
after “death”;
a word that no longer makes sense to Kimberly for obvious reasons.
Kim is breaking the mold by living bravely and speaking her truth
because she understands that this message is far too important to
hide under a shadow of fear and criticism. Her unique gifts enlighten
us with their authenticity and hope to disrupt the status quo by
allowing each of us room to ponder, question, and feel out our own
journeys of participating in a relationship with spirit in our own
individual ways.

Thank-you
kindly, Ms. Kimberly, for your caring, loving, and most beautiful
heart. Never stop sharing. Many of us have been profoundly touched
and influenced by the messages your channels have offered. Thank-you
to all of you in spirit who continue to live on, just differently,
yet love us unconditionally, and provide ongoing help and constant
support.

Leanne.

Prologue

Channeled
from Paul Walker

Hey
guys. Welcome. It’s cool that you’re here. Right now, I told Kim
to give us a minute so I could have a shot of gettin’ you started
in what some might consider a trip…a psycho fantastical trip. Cool.
I’m in. I’m up for anything. But you haven’t dropped into the
pages of a trip. It’s a journey. These pages that you’re about to
dive into are talks with
some of the coolest people. Some from the history books. Some from
recent times. These pages contain the words of those who’ve lived
some of the wickedest lives…who have done so much and who some,
consider, to have been taken way too soon. Thing is…Heaven isn’t
a destination. Heaven’s a state of being and it exists all around
you…all the time. It’s not a secret club that’s meant for some
and it’s not separate. Not even from you, the reader. I met my
girl, Kim, through a man named Erik Medhus. I did an interview with
him, his mom Elisa, and a medium named Robert. I had an agenda. I
wanted to find someone that I could share messages with, who didn’t
know much about me, other than a name and who was willing to go all
the way. I found that and through working with her as a partner and
as a friend, I found that I didn’t have to remain a memory…that I
could continue to live as Paul, on Earth, just in a different way. I
owe her. Kim’s my girl and through emotion, sometimes frustration
and a lot of love and laughs, we’ve gotten to a point where we’re
comfortable and ready to move forward with new ventures and to help
as many as we can bridge this gap. We (Spirit) never intended to be
just a memory. We live and we love and we’re with all those people
who we lived and loved with before our transitions. Kim doesn’t
like the word
death
because she doesn’t believe in it. I support that. So, you’ve
downloaded the book. Awesome. Thank you. That’s the first step.
Give us an hour. Flip through our journey. Get introduced to people
who are still very much a part of life; who can come with a thought
and who can get you to feel way more and deeper than you ever could
before. Let’s go for a ride. Let’s take your mind and your heart
on a journey. Maybe you’ll feel us and you’ll see that you, me
and all those that you thought were separate are really just beside
you…waiting for an in. Pick up the phone. Say our names. Ask us,
‘man, how’ve you been?’. We’ll answer honestly…

We
never left.

Paul.

Visit
with Paul Walker – 1st
Published Channel and the Start of…Something

January
29, 2016

Okay.
So I’m coming out of the closet, spiritually speaking. From the
support I have gotten from two close friends and my Spiritual Team
about what’s coming in, I’ve decided to be brave and share these
conversations. This is so new to me but I’ve been told that these
people are coming in with very honest intentions and to move forward
with this I am to give the same respect. So without further ado, I am
sharing my conversation with Paul Walker. I knew of
this guy but I didn't go out of my way to watch his movies or
anything. He was just a name in a world I know nothing about. It's
surprising that we connected. P
for Paul and K
for me.

P:
Finally. Knock, knock knock.

K:
I know. I’m sorry. I have to fit it in when I can but this could
take a while.

P:
I have all day. Like I’ve been telling you the whole morning. I do
know you’re busy so as long as it takes.

K:
It’s been a ride; this whole thing and I just wanted to say thanks
for hanging around. I know you wanted to talk today because of what
you’ve shown me.

P:
I’m getting pushy. But I did want to give a shout out to your
friend Sharon. I think she was what you needed to do this so I just
wanted to say hi. (Waves
his hand) She’s
awesome. You know that.

K:
I do. She’s always there at that exact moment I need to spiritually
vent.

P:
Shout out to Sharon!

K:
So I know that there are lots of discussions that we could talk about
that I would share…

P:
Oh no.

K:
And we have had private conversations about personal things to me…

P:
Yes.

K:
I told Sharon I might bring this up with you.

P:
I was telling you all day yesterday about throwing me under the bus
this way. This is our virgin voyage.

K:
But after talking with Sharon about all this celebrity
stuff, I’m still curious and I know you’ve been feeding me bits
and pieces…

P:
Yes.

K:
Women?

P:
Great.

K:
Seriously. You come from a life where you had many admirers, mostly
women, and they’re very protective of you and your memory. Did you
appreciate all or did you type cast?

P:
Wonderful. (Sarcasm)

K:
I could ask different things if you want.

P:
No, it’s fine. Like all people on earth, not just celebrities or
men, I had a type that I found attractive but that doesn’t mean I
found women of different types not beautiful.

K:
Okay.

P:
I think in the industry I was in, it was very difficult for anyone,
male or female, to be themselves. Especially for women, in some of
the films I made, you needed to be a specific type.

K:
Sexy.

P:
We could say that, sure, but was it what I personally preferred, not
always.

K:
What did you prefer?

P:
Someone who could keep up. (Laughing)
Seriously though, when my daughter was born it changed because I
wanted her to know that who she was in this world was important and
it didn’t matter that she was Paul
Walker’s daughter.
She was an individual. I think that when you become a parent, your
view of beauty is different because it’s a person not just a face.
You look at beauty different because you want to instill a sense of
confidence in your kids.

K:
Well put. I try to do that. My husband for sure. Especially with
Ireland.

K:
What do you think now, from your much broader perspective, about that
whole industry?

P:
Uh…Depends on what genre. With both men and women, appearance is
everything because they have to portray an image so anyone cast in a
role has to be believable. If you’re going for sex, that person had
to have the ‘body’ the ‘look’ (he’s
doing air quotes) If
you’re acting in a role about smarts then you have to look ‘smart’.
That’s what sells. But it’s stressful for these people. It does
take a toll. It’s almost one-upping a person with appearance to get
a role.

K:
Did you ever have to compete like that?

P:
Of course.

K:
Confidence?

P:
Practiced. (He smiles)
You get used to the way that career works. I felt very lucky that I
got…well, I found a niche that fit my personality. It came
easy…obviously.

K:
So women…

P:
I like how they are now starting to say what’s okay and what’s
not. I know you’ve always questioned or wondered about those
celebrities you read about but the message I want to bring forth is
that we’re not that image that’s portrayed and people like to dig
and dig for this thought or image of those celebrities that they
crush on but nine times out of ten, it’s not who they really are.
Believe it or not, we have lives that aren’t available for viewing
and that’s who we are and hopefully not what you see. Privacy is a
big thing that we have to struggle with.

K:
Yeah.

P:
Assumption creates all that rumor and usually it’s not true.
Anyway, back to women.

K:
Do you think women have to put on such a show? Not just celebrities
but in general?

P:
No.

K:
Not at all?

P:
Nope. Not at all. But there’s factors that play roles like
upbringing and social standards. Men do it too. It’s just not as
talked about.

K:
I agree. Men have those issues too.

P:
Yeah but people, and this goes for all, there’s too much emphasis
put on how others will look at you . You (He’s
talking about me) go
through that. Especially with talking to me.

K:
It’s true. I do. And how I hear you right now, there’s still that
thought about people not going to believe this.

P:
(shrug)
So?

K:
Is that the same thing you would tell someone if they thought they
didn’t look good to someone else?

P:
Yep.

K:
Hhhmmm.

P:
I lived how I wanted to live. I still do. I didn’t concern myself
with what others thought. I had bigger concerns. Like being a good
father, being a good brother, friend and son. What people assumed I
was
like wasn’t important. They can be protective of an image but it
was only those closest to me that could be protective of who I was as
a man.

K:
Do you enjoy the fan base you still have?

P:
I do. I appreciate the love. It’s a lot of love and without that
fan base I wouldn’t have had the life I did. I am honored and I
will always be grateful.

K:
I know you tried to give back.

P:
As much as I could. There are people all over the world that need
help. Especially after disasters. If I could use my ‘status’ to
bring awareness, I would.

K:
Again with the air quotes?

P:
It brings home a point.

K:
Yes it does.

P:
Celebrities could do more of that.

K:
Air quotes?

P:
No. Humanitarian aid effort. Whatever. Some do. But there could be
more I think. Let’s not just leave it to celebrities though. Let’s
say everyone. Everyone could be more helpful.

K:
I agree. In some way be helpful.

P:
In some way. (He nods)
Come on. Ask it. I know you want to.

K:
Oscar controversy?

P:
It’s always been there.

K:
How come it’s coming out now?

P:
Because people have a right to say how they feel. There’s
definitely still some inequality. Is that how it’s said?

K:
Very politically correct.

P:
Thanks.

K:
What would fix it?

P:
The same issues as the woman thing. Stop type casting. If a black man
or woman is better for a role but in the script it was thought of as
white, forget what it was thought as. It’s simple to me. Doesn’t
matter color or gender. It’s a human being. But I think it will
always be there. I think more African Americans should make more
movies. They would be awesome and it would set the stage for more
equality in all ways in that industry.

K:
Set the stage. Good one.

P:
Set the tone. There needs to be more proactive instead of reaction.

K:
Funny you should say that…

P:
I know. I know who visits.

K:
(Laughing)
How did a talk about women become about the Oscars?

P:
You asked and it’s all connected. Equality. I can’t believe you
still think you’re imagining this.

K:
I know. I’m sorry. I’ll get better.

P:
Eat that sandwich.

I’m
eating lunch.

K:
Want one?

P:
I’m good. So, are you going to take a leap of faith?

K:
Thinking about it.

P:
Come on. Be brave because there’s lots more to come.

K:
From who?

P:
From anyone.

K:
Oh God.

P:
(laughing)
I gotta go. You eat. I wanna give a shout out again to Sharon. And I
wanna say hi to everyone out there that keeps me alive. All your love
feeds me. I love you back.
(He kisses his palm and offers the kiss.)

K:
Bye Paul. Thanks.

P:
Bye.

Visit
with TomTom from the Afterlife

February
1, 2016

I
have been experiencing the presence of a young man, maybe seventeen
or eighteen years of age. He is Aboriginal and he has wanted a chance
to speak or to give an “interview”. I don’t know him, just that
he’s an Aboriginal boy from Canada and he kept telling me his name
was TomTom. I did an internet search to see if there was any native
name like that and all I got was some sort of drum. As I was walking
my dog I was thinking about him and found the feather of an owl. He
told me it was for me. I asked if he could show me who he was. I did
another internet search on “TomTom native name” and Thomas Moore
came up. I asked him if this was him and he confirmed it was. So a
head count of who’s who as I speak with him is my spirit guide,
Simon and Thomas (TomTom).

K:
I’m sorry to keep you waiting so long Thomas. Thank you for being
patient with me and thank you for the gift of the feather. You must
be connected to the owl somehow because in my dreams last night I was
with an owl.

T:
Yes. The owl is part of me.

K:
Does this mean totem stuff?

T:
Yes. Thank you for seeing me and talking with me.

K:
Thank you for being with me. You told me while we were introducing
ourselves over the last couple of days that you were from Manitoba
but in my research, which came up with very little, it said you went
to school in Saskatchewan.

T:
Yes, I was taken from my home and moved far away. This was so the
opportunity of leaving would be difficult.

K:
Is it true you went to a residential school?

T:
Yes. This is true. The photos that you see of me are the transition I
made from Cree
boy to white
boy. This was not of my choosing but it was pressed upon me to do so.

K:
Can you tell me a little bit about your experience? I mean, I hear of
the stories and I can only imagine the circumstances of your
schooling. Is there anything you would like to tell me? Were you
treated better than the others because you were the face of what the
intentions
of the schools were?

T:
This was propaganda. It did not show the truth of the situation. It
was only to show the public of the well-being
that the children of these schools were living. It was a face to a
situation that made it easier for people to turn away from. I was not
treated better than another. We were treated the same.

K:
What was it like when you were taken?

T:
It was like the trapping of an animal. I was lured with other
children and then taken.

K:
Did you ever see your family again?

T:
No. I was too young.

K:
Too young to run?

T:
Too young to remember. It was not only the clothes that changed. It
was similar to brainwashing. Those that fought suffered the most. It
was better to accommodate than to try and remain who I was.

K:
Why do you think these schools were constructed?

T:
Ignorance breeds racism. Questions were never asked about how my
people lived. We were considered to be heathens. We were considered
to be cavemen when the way we lived was of the earth and we respected
what the earth blessed us with.

K:
Did you die in the school?

T:
No. I died after I left. Fever. My kind; my people, could never
obtain the proper help or healthcare that we required and so many of
us died because of this. We were taken, we were changed, we were
released. The support, to continue in our new white
lives, was not there. We were slaves.

K:
I have to ask Thomas, why are you coming to me? I’m sure you know
that I’m pretty new at this stuff but such an emotional story and
such a heavy topic is a little uncomfortable for me. So I’m just
wondering why now, I guess?

T:
There is much assumption about what happened in the schools. There is
much hatred and ongoing sorrow because of what generations before
went through. Yes, we suffered but this does not mean that all must
continue to do so.

K:
Did this happen as soon as you arrived or was there “time” for
the young ones to, I guess practice a little?

T:
Not an abundant amount of time to learn new languages. It was
important to leave who you were as an Aboriginal person very quickly.
It was important to become “white” very quickly.

He
shows me children eating in large rooms together but there’s not
much talking. He shows me some areas were kept clean while others
were not. This was where illness was most prevalent.

K:
In my knowledge of residential schools, I was reading of abuse?
Physical and otherwise?

T:
Yes. This was in order to maintain control but we did not have to act
out in ways that would warrant discipline. We were disciplined
anyway. We were disciplined for being Aboriginal.

K:
I have to ask this because it’s always there. It’s like the
elephant in the room of this situation. Did you blame religion for
what you went through? I don’t know much but I have heard that
these schools were run by Christians so I’m just wondering if, when
you lived it, you blamed religion or even God?

T:
I blamed ignorance. I had no knowledge of your churches at this time.
In my young age I did not know of a God
as how you thought of this term. I knew of ancestry, of spirit, of
earth. I did understand God but in my own terms of a Central Source.
It was not only one. It was all. No, I did not hold blame to a
religion. I held blame to the individuals that I suffered under.

K:
And now?

T:
I only hold a space of forgiveness and love. I cannot hold onto to
hateful feelings here because it is impossible. I only hold the
lessons that I have learned from living that life as a child and
young man.

K:
What was your death like?

T:
It was freedom. I was given wings to fly.

K:
The owl?

T:
Yes.

K:
How are you now and by that I mean how do you live now?

T:
I live with my people. I hold those that cry in a space of
forgiveness and love. I am with my ancestors and together we continue
to teach of rising from ashes and to be reborn through forgiveness.
Too often it is seen that the suffering of the Aboriginal, from all
areas of this world, is used to keep them down in this energy. It is
the time to rise up and use the experience of abuse as a tool of
knowledge about how to come out of the darkness and still remember
who one is, in the true spirit of one’s birth. One is handed
circumstances in life. It is coming out of this with an understanding
of purpose that is important. It is a time to gain self-love from
hardship.

K:
You wanted to speak about the missing Aboriginal women?

T:
Yes.

K:
What would you like to say about it?

T:
It is the same cycle only in different form. This cycle stems from
within the culture and not outside of it. It is because my people
have not been able to heal and so the cycle continues.

K:
But this doesn’t mean all Aboriginals are still trapped in these
cycles.

T:
No, but it is still there. We are still separated as a culture when
your country was founded by it; by us. We should not remain separate
and yet we are.

K:
Some would say that it’s time to stop using history as an excuse
for behavior; that there is help offered but it’s not taken.

T:
No resources for help because of ages old bias and racist assumption.
The help is still based on race. When an Aboriginal man or woman is
seen on the street and it is apparent they are suffering, assumptions
are made based on what they look like or who they are. There is not
enough help available for these men and women because of preconceived
ideas and judgements that continue to this day. The wars that my
people fought still reside in their being today. It is a difficult
road with equally difficult solutions.

K:
Do you see this changing?

T:
Yes.

He
shows me a picture of our recently elected Prime Minister, Justin
Trudeau.

T:
He is the face of change, of sensitivity and insight to conversations
not being spoken. He will start these talks by peace, by
understanding that the past has shaped our present but will not shape
our future.

K:
You speak like you’re alive with us now.

T:
I am. There is no death. I am present.

K:
Did you live your highest potential or were you not able to?

T:
I was not able to under the circumstances that I lived. I did my best
with the life that I ultimately chose but I continue to live my
highest potential now.

K:
Are you a guide?

T:Yes.

K:
Were you ready to transition when you did?

T:
Yes. I was ready for freedom.

K:
Do you see earth evolving or staying the same?

T:
The earth has already evolved and heals Herself as we speak. It is
humanity that is unable to keep up.

K:
Because of?

T:
Because of traditions, ways of being passed on through the centuries
without seeing that there are higher ways. Humanity suppresses
itself. This is a choice. Only a few have the vision to make
productive change. This, we can now see happening.

K:
I know that you want to shed light on the past but is there anything
that you have to shed some awareness on the future?

T:
Only by forgiveness can humanity rise. Only by love of Self can
humanity forgive. Life does not continue by residing in the past. The
way a person acts and behaves now has more to do with loving what is
inside. For this is where healing takes place.

K:
The apology that was made by the Canadian government…

T:
Was the first step but it is only up to the ones that continue to
linger in resentment to accept these words and move on. Sometimes it
is easier to stay in the dark than to open to the light.

K:
The reserves that the Aboriginal people live on…you just showed me
a picture so I have to ask your thoughts on this.

T:
It is only to continue segregation/separation when it is integration
that will allow healing. It only perpetuates the cycles of the past.

K:
But some choose to stay in those communities so the culture isn’t
forgotten.

T:
And this is a choice on their part. Communities can still support
each other within a country of oneness; within a world of oneness.

K:
So not just in Canada but globally.

T:
Yes. One does not need to retain borders to hold onto individuality.
It is the incorporation of differences that creates beauty in
diversity.

K:
Many of the Aboriginal people of Canada, because I don’t know much
about the other countries, converted to Christianity.

T:
It is because they found the love of Christ. It is more about the man
that was Jesus than the religion. He heals the sick and suffering.
They found healing through his presence and his words.

K:
And you?

T:
I have found my healing through helping in higher ways, through
spirit and through my ancestors; those who have come before me. I
haven’t lost who I was. I only gained what I could not be on earth.

K:
Would you like me to share this?

T:
This is why I have come forth; so my message of forgiveness can be
read and taken to heart from someone who had everything to forgive.
They tried to erase who I was but who I was I will be for eternity.

K:
Are you happier…I guess, with the way you were taken from what you
knew; how you lived?

T:
I suppose if I was taken as an older child, I may have endured a
worse fate. It happened how it was meant to. I have no regrets, only
a deeper understanding of those times. It wasn’t for me to
understand as I lived it; only to experience it as I did. Those that
would look at my picture have questions that stir in their minds
about those times. Yes, it was awful and sometimes unimaginable or
unthinkable. I only hope that my words give some answers and what can
happen when there is opportunity to move forward from darkness. It
doesn’t always have to involve the death of the human form. It can
happen when there is life. Back when the photo was taken, I was the
picture of reform. Now I wish to be the picture of a new day, of
forgiveness and of a unified world that can come out of the ashes
unscathed.

K:
Thank you Thomas. I hope that this isn’t the only time we’ll
talk. I hope that we can speak again. I’m happy we stayed clear of
the abuse. I have trouble hearing those kinds of things.

T:
Yes. I know. It is better to introduce each other in advance of these
questions and answers. It happened but the abuse has not continued
with me. Only transcended. As the Spirit of a people still can.

K:
Thank you so much. I’ll share your words. I think that their
purpose was so people can stop dwelling in being a victim and become
their own hero. I don’t speak just about the Aboriginal people but
for all people that have suffered by the hands of another.

T:
Yes. I thank you for taking the time to visit with me. I know you
have been feeling unwell. I wish you abundant health in these times
of new unfolding for you.

K:
Thanks. It’s funny, I was feeling okay while you were with me and
now that you’re ready to go, I’m feeling a little more under the
weather. (Have a cold.)

T:
This will not last long. Good bye Kimberly.

K:
Bye Thomas.

Conversation
with Paul Walker – Talking About God

February
6, 2016

This
chat was fun. He's so fun. I'm sure everyone that knew him was well
aware that this man was very special. We're talking God today and
he's just in jeans and a light blue t-shirt. He's sitting on a chair
while I'm sitting at my desk. He's always so casual. Here we go.

P:
Yes, and we’re back. How are you Kim?

K:
I’m doing very well. Thank you. How are you?

P:
I am excellent. Just hanging out. Get those other voices out of your
head. I’m tired of competing with them.

K:
You don’t have to compete with anyone.

P:
Uh…did we not have this discussion already this morning?

K:
Yes, we did. I’m all ears….and brain…I guess.

P:
Excellent. Did you want to bring him in today?

K:
I’m tempted but I think I have to have those conversations in a
better place than work.

P:
No problem. God take two?

K:
Is that where you want to go?

P:
Well you asked and I think it’s one of those talks that people want
to have but kind of sweep it under the rug because it’s too
controversial or judged or…there’s so many differences of opinion
on the matter.

K:
But do you want to take some time to explain it in your view or do
you want to call people out on what or how they choose to believe?

P:
Never. I would never do that. Not my business. Go get your book Kim.
Come on.

K:
Done. We did talk about this before so are we just rehashing.

P:
A little bit but I’m willing to put it out there. I don’t think
it’s a topic that people need to be shy about. It’s religion
right? It gets all messed up in Religion.

K:
So now you have a problem with Religion?

P:
Nope. None. Zip. It’s personal. How people perceive a higher power
is a deeply personal experience.

K:
Yes. Agreed. So we started this conversation with me accusing you of
following me and then you said…

P:
I am following you.

K:
There are skeptics out there.

P:
Let ‘em. We’ve talked about this.

K:
You want to rehash this too?

P:
Skeptics is like a broken record. Everyone has skeptics. It’s not
just in certain areas. Everyone has to have their opinions but that’s
just it. It’s their opinion. It’s like dating…

P:
It’s like this being
or some guy in the sky that runs the show. Usually a he
and he directs what happens. Like ‘That wasn’t good, you’re
out.’ Or ‘You can stay, you followed the rules.’ Right?

K:
Yes. So what are you going to say?

P:
It’s not that.

K:
At all?

P:
Maybe like a grain of sand of truth but not really. Not at all.

K:
Okay, so then what is it for you?

P:
Deeply personal. When I was alive I would think in terms of someone
like that but it is so much bigger and it is so much more personal. I
was given a lot. I led a very cool existence. I was given a lot of
opportunities that some others didn’t get. Did that make me better
in the eyes of some being?
No. I was living the story I chose.

K:
But you didn’t see that while you lived.

P:
Not in that way but I did realize that I had a lot of good things
going for me and I was very thankful. Did I say thank you to God.
Sure. Did I worship a God. Not in the sense that someone going to
church was. Did I practice a religion to worship God. Not diligently
but that person, that old guy in the sky, I definitely said thank you
to. It was a private thing.

K:
Wow. Okay so now?

P:
You’ve heard that it’s He/She. There’s no gender but even
that…I mean, you take your beliefs with you when you get here. I
thought of a He
and that’s what I experience here.

K:
A continual thing? Not just a once in a while high five to Source
Creator?

P:
No. It’s constant. And I know there are the scientists and I know
there are the Atheist but…(he
points to some sort of audience.)
you wait. You’ll see. What about you? You’ve told me before but
tell them.

K:
Well, I believe in an energy. A Creative Source. I do catch myself
saying He
a lot but it’s only because I was raised that way but when I say my
prayers in the morning it’s Mother Father god. I believe in…

P:
I feel you. Like all encompassing.

K:
Yes. It is very difficult to define but, like I told you before, I
think of it as something so huge that It’s the Universe(s) and yet
something so small that It lives in your heart.

P:
Bingo.

K:
Did you just say bingo?

P:
Because that’s not okay?

K:
Just unexpected.

P:
Right on?

K:
Okay. What else. I’m going to interrupt and just say that I love,
when you think of her, you show me rainbows. So sweet.

P:
I just love her so much. It makes me glow.

K:
I know. So sweet. So, when we were talking about this before, I could
sense that you were getting frustrated because you couldn’t find
the words to describe it.

P:
The words don’t do it justice. There are no words because it’s
all words. It’s everything. It’s so huge.

He
holds out his arms really big.

K:
Do you think we could ever understand the topic here?

P:
Yes but it would be very limited then to actually experience it. Look
at you asking the tough questions.

K:
Only because we’ve talked about it before.

P:
Cheater.

K:
Sue me. Expand on limited.

P:
Yes, there would have to be a lot of misconceptions dropped but for
some people, those misconceptions are the base of how they worship
and what they believe so it would be like pulling the rug out from
under them. It would be scary because, with the ones that are very
devotional, it’s an extension of them personally. It makes them who
they are without realizing that it is already who they are. They
don’t have to aspire to greatness to please God. People are already
great.

K:
So the human perception of God is okay.

P:
If you don’t use it as an excuse to be better than someone, I say
go hard. But there’s no right or wrong way to think of God. One,
because you really have no clue and Two, there’s no right or wrong.
There just is.

K:
No fair because I have to record these and you can just talk. Which
you’re good at.

P:
I’m not sure how to take that.

K:
I told you this morning how I would just love to sit and…

P:
Shoot the shit?

K:
Yes. You have an incredible friendly magnetic personality. Especially
when you get going.

P:
Thank you. Wise?

K:
Okay…onward.

P:
Nice (sarcasm)

K:
Obviously, for all intents and purposes, you’re wise. Look where
you are.

P:
Doesn’t mean I’m separate.

K:
I’m starting to understand that. So, the last time we were on this
subject you gave me that feeling of the heart just opening and
expanding and it wanted to make me cry…don’t you dare!

P:
Have some fun.

K:
That feeling you gave me.

P:
Like placing the most amazing food on your tongue for a split second
and saying no more while you pull it away. It barely touches the
experience of what God is. It’s…every joyful feeling you have
ever had and feeling it at the same time. Unreal.

K:
I think I’d explode.

P:
Yeah. You probably would. Just because the physical can’t take that
much at once.

K:
And the Spiritual.

He
shows me a plant in the sun and it grows fast and big.

K:
So it’s like the sun to a plant.

P:
In fast ways. Growth happens very quickly here.

K:
For everyone?

P:
For those that want it.

K:
Huh. You talked about feeling proud.

P:
Just adding to what I just said about all that feeling.

K:
Got it. So to recap. God is not limited and isn’t religious.

P:
Yep. What did you say once to your friend? All roads lead to the same
home.

K:
Same place.

P:
Same ending.

K:
Or same beginning.

P:
We could do this all day.

K:
We could. Anything else?

P:
I’m happy we could do this.

K:
Yes. I agree. Thanks for the chat this morning.

P:
Wait till they see who I want to talk to. He’s hanging around.
You’ve seen him.

K:
Don’t you dare.

P:
Hey people! Tell Kim you want more!

K:
I knew you were going to do that.

P:
You’re going to put it to words.

K:
I can’t delete it. I promised word for word and respect.

P:
Hey people! Tell Kim you want more!

K:
Are we closing?

P:
Yes. Thanks for the company. Thanks everyone out there for connecting
with me like this. It’s new for me too so I just want to say hi to
all of you and thanks for thinking of me and keeping me alive. I feel
it. You have no idea. Bye Kim. See you...call me.

K:
I can never call first because you’re always the first to call.

P:
Bye.

K:
Bye.

Conversations
with Christine Chubbuck

February
10, 2016

I
guess I should set the stage. I didn’t know about this story. I
only saw an article because of films coming out based on what she
went through. Today I had the honor of speaking with Christine
Chubbuck. I distinctly remember reading the article then looking at
her picture and asking her what she was thinking. She surprisingly
answered me and for the last couple of weeks she’s been introducing
herself. Today she offered a small conversation on that exact topic.
Thanks again, Christine. You were a great experience.

K:
You called? (Addressing
Paul and he has a woman with him.)

P:
How are you Kim?

K:
I’m doing pretty good today. How are you? I see you have a guest
with you. I don’t believe this is the first time we’ve met.

P:
No. I don’t think so either. Kim, Christine. Christine, Kim.

K:
Hi Christine. How are you today?

C:
I’m well today. Thanks for answering.

K:
You look so happy.

C:
I am happy. I’m very happy.

K:
So is this connection based on something else?

C:
We connected that afternoon I spoke to you when you were browsing the
article of my story.

K:
Okay, so the back story is, I was reading an article about what
happened to you because I guess there’s a couple of movies coming
out on your death or whatever. I don’t know anything about the
movies. I decided against looking them up because the article
explained enough. Did you want to tell me, yourself, how you died?

C:
I decided to take my own life. It didn’t go as planned. I don’t
think it ever truly does. I ended up shooting myself on television.

K:
So when I looked at your picture I asked what you were thinking. Your
voice was so loud it was almost unbelievable. I guess I’m going to
repeat that question. What were you thinking?

C:
At that point, I wasn’t thinking. I was numb. For me, the decision
had been made before that day that I would do this. It wasn’t a
last minute mental break down decision. Mentally, I was having
constant break downs although most of the time they were internal.

K:
So no one knew the extent of how much you were struggling or they
didn’t think you were struggling so much that you would take your
own life?

C:
I think there was always a thought, especially with my parents, that
I would commit suicide but I don’t think anyone believed that I
would do it the way I did. The cameras were not supposed to be
rolling at that time but I had made the decision to do it and cameras
or not, I was ready to go.

K:
I don’t think anyone could really understand what would drive
someone to do something like that but you said you weren’t
thinking. Was it almost like an autopilot moment?

C:
Very much so. It was very…quiet in my mind for the first time since
I was small.

K:
You’re giving me the word methodical?

C:
I was detached from my actions but my actions were methodical yes. I
knew where the gun was, I knew where I wanted it, and I knew that I
was pulling the trigger. I understand that this isn’t easy for you
to channel. I simply wanted the opportunity to explain. There are
many many people that judge my actions as horrible and disgusting.
How could I do that to my family; to my friends? My grandmother
always watched on the television. What was I thinking? I can honestly
tell you I was not. Not anymore. I didn’t want to think
anymore.

K:
So you suffered from some sort of depression.

C:
Caused by disorders that I couldn’t control.

K:
You’re showing me a split…bipolar?

C:
Yes.

K:
Did you seek help?

C:
At that time, the help that I obtained could only do so much. Now,
it’s something people talk about and there are better treatments. I
must commend my family for all they offered me. They loved me very
much and spared no expense for trying to help me as best as the
medical professions knew how to at that time.

K:
Did any of the treatments work?

C:
Yes. Some were very helpful. It was a rollercoaster ride. A mental
rollercoaster ride but, when I decided I had had enough, the ride was
constantly a mental free fall. I was plummeting all the time. There
were no plateaus. There were only great falls.

K:
Did you not want to seek more help or did you think it was going to
be this never ending cycle?

C:
It wasn’t a cycle anymore. It was just never ending. I was tired of
pretending to be this woman on the outside when on the inside, every
single day was turning into a struggle. I was drowning in trying to
keep face; to portray an image that I didn’t have inside.

K:
How do you feel about the movies?

C:
The sensationalism of my death only hurts the ones that had to endure
it. My family has to suffer all over again. I never understood
people’s addiction to making one’s life sensationalized on the
screen for everyone to see and believe and yet what they see on the
screen is nothing like what I endured. My struggles, although some
knew about them, were very private.

K:
So you didn’t end your life on television for show?

C:
Absolutely not. As I said before, it was intended not to be on the
television.

K:
I feel frustration when I ask about the movies.

C:
Yes. How does someone’s struggles and death become entertainment?

K:
Sadly, I don’t think yours is the only one Christine. I am sorry
about that. I would have to say that the entertainment industry will
try to glorify things for profit instead of truth these days.

P:
Is that your professional opinion, Kim?

K:
I just think that the entertainment industry is running out of steam,
steam meaning new creative ideas, and has to profit, sometimes, from
situations in this world that need to be prayed about and loved
instead of dramatized for profit. That’s just my personal input. I
don’t mean to offend anyone but are people, those that watch the
story of Christine, supposed to learn something?

C:
I don’t think the movies are for educational purposes. (She’s
laughing)

K:
You didn’t die right away. I think that your family would wonder if
you suffered. Is there something you would like to tell them in
regards to that?

C:
I didn’t suffer. I wasn’t in pain. My physical body just didn’t
die right away. I had already left my body. I was with my family, not
physically, but in spirit, I guess you could say.

K:
So you were able to see the reactions of everyone after you had done
what you did?

C:
After I shot myself? It was in the hospital that I…left I guess. My
physical body.

K:
Wow. I’m feeling so much right now. Thank you for not showing
me…well…you know.

C:
I don’t think you need to see things like that when you’re trying
to give us a voice.

K:
Your parents?

C:
I think the stress of what I was going through ultimately made things
difficult for them. I internalized that guilt as well. I felt that it
was my fault, in many ways, that they had to work so hard to try and
fix
me. I wished their efforts had better results.

K:
I can imagine.

C:
I didn’t decide to take my life because it would hurt many. People
would say that suicide is selfish. There are many thoughts on the
subject and I’m not here to create a debate. I just had no more
rope.

K:
Was there a will to try more?

C:
No. In my case anyway, I cannot speak for all people who take their
life, in my case my will to try to continue my life was…well…it
had died. I wasn’t able to find a way to live that was one hundred
percent me. I was conflicted constantly. I fought with my mental and
emotional…I guess awareness, daily. Minute by minute it became a
struggle. A constant fight; a constant war. I think that those living
with these states of depression or mental angst can understand that.
Not enough to take their own life but can understand that no one
could really understand what they are going through on a minute to
minute basis. It needs to be talked about. I felt shame. There were
times I felt that I should be able to overcome this. I had tremendous
guilt that I couldn’t with all the help that was offered to me. I
was angry with myself for not being able to overcome this….thing in
my mind that would fight with me. I felt no one could really
understand me when I couldn’t even understand myself.

K:
What was it like when you crossed over?

C:
I needed some time to heal. I was met by so much love. I was met with
a great reunion but I did have to pull back and heal. I had a lot of
guilt that I needed to work through but I didn’t have to do it
myself. My struggles when I was alive, I needed to understand the
why’s and the why not’s and heal from that.

K:
Do you think you have?

C:
Yes. It’s been a long time. (She
smiles) I should hope
I’ve done some work.

K:
How do you feel about your choices now? Do you have regrets?

C:
I regret the pain and confusion that I caused my family and friends
but I also understand that it was a choice that I made at that time
and I’ve forgiven myself for it. I don’t want to say that suicide
is meant to be. Most times, it isn’t and it is not an escape
because I still had to learn those lessons here. It’s just in
different ways.

K:
And for those that decide to watch your movies?

C:
As well intentioned as those that made the movies may or may not have
been… take it with a grain of salt. What you see on the screen
cannot touch the reality of what she
went through when she
lived. (She speaks of
herself in the third person. She reminded me later that she isn't the
same person, obviously, anymore.)

K:
Paul?

P:
Yeah?

K:
Anything?

P:
Nope. Thanks Christine. I know you’ve wanted a chance to speak.

C:
Thank you so much for allowing me to come. I appreciate the time. I
hope that I’ve given some insight into the questions that people
might have.

K:
Thank you so much Christine. I really appreciate you showing yourself
to me. You’re very sweet and beautiful. I get the feeling that when
you lived you were very loved and liked.

C:
Thank you. I’d like to think I was. (She
laughs. She has a great laugh)
Thank you.