Monday, November 30, 2009

Oh wow, what a greta episode of my favorite show ever! Intervention followed a batsh--crazy woman named Linda who was addicted to pain medication and thought that electricity was killing her. She once mad her brother tape a maxi pad to her. Ewwww!

I'm not addicted to pain killers, I'm just addicted to free food! Today it was a mini box of Nerds and a Hershey bar. Pretty mild!

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Well, what a long weekend it has been! While I am super depressed about returning to work tomorrow, I am thankful for all the free food I ate!

Let's start with Thursday. My sister Katie and her roommate Molly hosted Thanksgiving in their beautiful apartment in Hoboken. Molly and her friends work in the restaurant industry so the food was AMAZING. I ate lots of cool apps and delish turkey and gravy and pies and cookies. Yippee!

Then on Friday my sister and I met our uncles for dinner in Murray Hill. They treated us to a lovely meal at some Italian restaurant. I ate butternut squash soup and a chicken dish. So good!

Saturday I went to my friend Paul's birthday party in Brooklyn. While I didn't eat any free food, I drank lots of free booze!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Your girl Liz may be 24(plus a few), but she's still a party girl at heart! Just like a 23 year old!

Case in point--Last night I met my new friend Jessica out at Crescent & Vine in Astoria. I picked Jessica up at the laundromat a couple weeks ago. Why don't I have luck picking up MEN in the laundromat??? Oh well, Jess will do for now.

Jess brought her friend Valerie and then my two other friends--met through mutual friends--Meghan and Sandy joined us. I drank 3 Chimays and one other kind of beer, and dined on complimentary olives. Woohoo! Free snacks at the bar!

After a couple hours there we ventured to Sparrow's across from the Bohemian Beer Garden. We met a few guys. I think I asked one of them to buy me a drink! What a desperate 24 year old I am! He obliged, and I didn't even finish it.

At 3 we went home. I listened to music till 5 just because. I woke up way too early and finally mustered the strength to go to Chinatown for my children lit book club. We discussed A Wrinkle in Time, but I found the Rice Krispies treats, Sees chocolates, and even the healthy hummus far more exciting!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

It doesn't get much better than that people. My dear friend and fellow comic Selena Coppock hosted a gathering of funny females tonight at the Luca Lounge, and she bought us all a round of shots. Thanks lady!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

I am so excited because tomorrow the 6th floor of my office is throwing a potluck all day! I baked chocolate chip cookies, and I am so excited to see what other people are cooking! All I know is it will be a lot of free food!

Monday, November 16, 2009

Every since Falcon the Balloon Boy was unleashed upon us, I have thought that Papa Richard Heene looked just like somebody but I couldn't place it. Then today I was on imdb and realized that he's Sam Merlotte! He only wishes he was a shape shifter!So besides recognizing who stars look like, I spent quite a good part of my day eating. Yippee! I met my friend for dinner at Brooklyn Diner. In midtown, of course. We ordered pigs in a blanket, Chinese chicken salad, and mac and cheese. Be aware that these entrees were about $20 each so this is not your grandmother's diner. I also drank 2 glasses of pinot grigio and I was soooooo happy when my friend paid for dinner. Which made it free!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

It's very tough beging a girl in the city who likes to read free books from the library and eat free food from anywhere. My schedule is busier than Hillary Clinton's, I bet. But, I always find time to write for my people.

Weekends are usually tough for my free food adventures but this weekend was successful. Yesterday a nice Jewish boy bought be a Guinness at a bar on the Upper East Side. Then today my running group had a pizza party so I ate pizza, a piece of a sub sandwich, a black and white cookie, a cream cheese brownie, some M & Ms, and Diet Coke.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Hello all! My legions of fans, I know you have missed me so so so much! I am back, though this will be short since I am sleepy.

At any rate, my absence was due to my recent trip to Club Med in Turks and Caicos. The trip was all inclusive, so while I technically paid for my food, it was an all you can eat buffet so it felt free! My 10 favorite foods there, in no particular order:

1) egg and cheese English Muffin sandwich2) cheeseburger3) Ice cream!4) that egg salad we had, that was an actual salad with a poached egg5) gnocchi

Shoot, I can't remember my other 5. Where is Lori when I need her??? We might have added the fries to the list. Oh, I think I just remembered 6.

6) crepes

At any rate, I am sure Lori will remind me what I ate!

Getting back to work was tough. I miss the all you can drink Mojitos and Bahama Mamas and Thai Punch. Thankfully, there is still a stash of free candy in my office. Over the past couple days I have ate Reese's peanut butter cups, Hershey Bars, and York Peppermint Patties.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

While this time of year is painful for me as a Red Sox fan because the Yankees are playing in the World Series, I am still grateful to be living in the greatest city in the world! And that's because today was the New York City Marathon! I d idn't run it, but 40000 other people did! It was so completely inspiring and I am so proud of every single person who ran! Bravo!

I cheered on my training group at 96th and First Ave--mile 18. A bunch of us hung out there to distribute refreshments. I managed to sneak some M and Ms for myself. Yeah for free food!

About Me

Liz Simons is a New York City-based comedian who has performed all over the city at top clubs including Carolines, Gotham, and Broadway Comedy Club. She has been a featured performer in the show Mortified in New York and Boston. She is adorable, single, and likes to eat. She started this blog because she was known as the girl at her office who was always the first person to know about the leftover food from meetings. And how she loved that free food! She took that passion and now writes about her daily selection of free food.