Sunday, 22 June 2014

Like you, I have a Zombie Plan. It’s very interesting what
your plan can sometimes say about you. Some people want to kill themselves
immediately to avoid the trauma and constant burden of hardcore survival. If
they’re running zombies then even I will admit this is a strong Plan B. Some
people want to head north and wait for the zombies to freeze. Some want to head
south where it’ll be warm and fertile. Some just want to go zombie-hunting. Some
want to loot. Some want to seal themselves underground in a nuclear fallout
shelter. Some want to find a blimp and coast breezily over the apocalypse.

Yes this seems feasible

Those people in the fallout shelter might have the right
idea. The other day someone pointed out to me that nuclear power plants
require constant attendance. Otherwise within two weeks, the coolant will have
evaporated. That’s an important component. Without it, people start using words
like ‘radiation poisoning’ and ‘disaster’ and ‘meltdown’. There are currently nine
active nuclear power plants in the UK.

After the break, we’ll see how this factor can be included
in the Zombie Plan.

Tuesday, 3 June 2014

I’m back! If anyone cares, the years of silence were because
I went to space. For years. Yeah, it was a pretty big deal. They made me their
king. You probably didn’t hear about it in the mainstream media. Anyway, I was
called back to planet Earth because someone wrote this on Facebook:

Identity redacted in a fetching puce/violet shade

So, due to the overwhelming popular demand of one person,
after the page break we’re gonna kick things off by looking at some of the
adverts for the upcoming 2014 World Cup in Brazil! Get it? KICK things off? HA!
Still got it.