Tired of scaring humans every October 31 with the same old bag of tricks, Jack Skellington, the spindly king of Halloween Town, kidnaps Santa Claus and plans to deliver shrunken heads and other ghoulish gifts to children on Christmas morning.

An LA detective is murdered because she has microfilm with the recipe to make cocaine cookies. A "Lethal Weapon" style cop team tries to find and stop the fiends before they can dope the nation by distributing their wares via the "Wilderness Girls" cookie drive.

A narcissistic TV weatherman, along with his attractive-but-distant producer and mawkish cameraman, is sent to report on Groundhog Day in the small town of Punxsutawney, where he finds himself repeating the same day over and over.