I am the First Lady of HR with a stellar career.
"People" is my middle name, on Tuesdays.
"Save a dollar, save a dime, spending cash is a corporate crime"

Monday, 15 December 2014

When the geeks take over

#2

I heard lots of noise from the R&D conference room. The noise consisted of nerds speaking in foreign tongues, loud Hindi, Russian, Hebrew, Ukrainian and Cantonese music blazing from mobile phones, and Comrade Carl Marks holding a megaphone, addressing his motley group of Internet of Things and Big Data engineers.

Comrade Carl bellowed: "Without your support, I would never have been appointed as second in command. Kibinimat, I am going to change things. We will not waste our time on quality. We will bury tactical bugs in the internet of things. I will set up a union and liberate all of us from the ladies of HR's tyranny".

Even by Carl's standards, I was shocked by his hallucinations.

Suddenly, I got a text from Cynthia Axe the head of Load-shedding and Early Bird Retirement. "Have you heard about Carl's promotion to be number 2"?

When Axe wrote "have you heard", I knew she smelt blood. No one is as bloodthirsty as a junior HR employee.

I walked at a quick clip into CEO Stan's room. I did not even knock at the door, although I am posh. Stan was standing at the door as I came in and he said:

"Gloria, you are the first lady of HR-so I am giving you a new Toyota Prius. Here are the key's! Let's go to the parking lot!"

I want to reaffirm that a key component of the success of a senior HR manager is business partnership with the boss.

My new Prius says it all- I am an agile, highly valued and well paid HR business partner.