i know i said i'd update this last week but i didnt so there.the last two thursdays caityjim filled in for my netball team. although she now has severe back pain and/or damage, she played awesomely. its alllll because of her that we drew, and beleive you me, we have only lost so far this season. after the game we were all celebrating about the draw, 10 all, which made me wonder about what we will do if we eventually win.

anywho, this entry is aaaaall about how caity rocks and carried my netball team to the closest thing to victory we've had thus far.

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ok, so im crazy. bite me.

i feel sickies... too many malteasers. i was watching black books season 2 and manny wanted a holiday so he could eat malteasers, and so naturally i went to bilo and i bought aforementioned malteasers. baaaaaad idea... but te up side is that i also have coke, which is just as much fun :|

ever feel like no matter how hard you try you will never be good enough?

ever feel like youre falling into a hole and the only person who can save you won't?

it has been so long, why is this still happening to me? i have tried so hard, resisted so much... its not fair to do this to me. isn't it my turn to be happy? when i see him my face burns.. can't i have my turn? my poor heart will never learn...

as the philosopher mick jagger once said, 'you can't always get what you want'.

...

but as it turns out, 'if you try sometimes you might find that you get wht you need'.

i think that there is alot of truth in the saying that we are never ahppy with what we have. i bet theres someone in the world who is so envious of my life and would kill for it. in comparison, i hate my life and myself. this isnt enough for me, i need something else, to be someone else. so now the questions which beg answers are, am i the selfish one for not being happy with what i am and what i have? or is it the erson who wants my life who is the guilty one? what about the person who wants that person's life? where does it end??

i thought i should probably put something in here so u all dont get worried and think i fell down a well....

year 11 isnt much fun, especially since dad is trying to like ban me from leaving the house apart from school... he keeps going on aboutproirities, but i think what he means is that his priorities dont fit in with me.... grr

my friends are the most important thing in my life right now. without them, i would die, i really would. you guys are always there when i need you and i hope i can be there for you guys too if you need someone. yes, teeghan, even u. dont you give me that look.... im so glad caitlin and cassi are happy with their respective significant others, even if it does mean i dont see them as often as i would want to. as long as youre happy, i dont mind one bit.

so the athletics carnival is next week and the bitch of a teacher put me in 1500m... i ran around washingtondrive, carramar drive, karingal drive, santa barbara and washington again (caitlin you'll know what im talking about- i dont know about the rest of you!) which is a bit more than 1500m but i did ok, finished in just und 10 minutes and i only walked a little bit :D i was quite proud.

anywho, i have better things to do with my time... well actually i dont, but i like to pretend i do... shut the hell up...

Your full name:: Brigid Mary FeenanAge:: 16Height:: dunnoNatural hair colour:: blondeEye colour:: brown or hazel or something that end of the spectrumNumber of siblings:: 3Glasses/contacts?:: NoPiercings:: yesTattoos:: NoBraces?:: used to

FAVOURITE

Colour:: purple, blue, occasionally blackBand:: tripod!!Song:: too many (songs that is, not the song... if that is a song...)Stuffed animal: i have lots... dont make me choose!Video game:: :|TV show:: frasier, lano and woodley, lots of abc comedies :DMovie:: there are lots.... cant think of them all... argh!!!Book:: dictionary or bible, depending on my moodFood:: fatty confort food :DGame on a cell phone:: snake 2CD cover: *shrugs*Flower:: a fake oneScent:: i like guys' deodorant... its always so much better Animal:: dogs and pigmiesComic book:: twinkle twinkleCereal:: the cereal barsWebsite:: dont make me choose!Cartoon:: simpsons

DO YOU

Play an instrument?:: yesWatch TV more than 60 hours a week?:: nupLike to sing?:: when im alone, yesHave a job?:: no :DHave a cell phone?:: YesLike to play sports?:: yupHave a boyfriend/girlfriend?:: nopeHave a crush on someone?:: whats with all the questions?Live somewhere NOT in the united states?:: YesHave more than 5 TVs in your house?:: noHave any special talents/skills?:: no im boringExcercise daily?:: almost dailyLike school?:: no

CAN YOUSing the alphabet backwards?:: cant sing at all or say it backwars Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?:: nopeSpeak any other languages?:: i can say simple things in italian Go a day without food?:: yes if i think i need to... i have awesome will power wen i want to :DStay up for more than 24 hours?:: YesRead music, not just tabs?:: a bitRoll your tongue?:: yes, wen my tongue ring isnt inEat a whole pizza?:: a small one, if im hungry

HAVE YOU EVERSnuck out of the house?:: yes, not mine, but yesCried to get out of trouble?:: yesGotten lost in your city?:: yepSeen a shooting star?:: nopBeen to any other countries besides the united states?:: Australia!!Had a serious surgery?:: NoStolen something important to someone else?:: NoSolved a rubiks cube?:: no but i threw one onceGone out in public in your pajamas?:: yupCried over a girl?:: noCried over a boy?:: yeahKissed a random stranger?:: sortaHugged a random stranger?:: NopeBeen in a fist fight?:: NopeBeen arrested?:: NopeDone drugs?:: nopeHad alcohol?::yesLaughed and had milk come out of your nose?:: not milk, but u noPushed all the buttons on an elevator?:: hee heee, yeahGone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?:: nopeSwore at your parents?:: yesBeen to warped tour?:: noKicked a guy where it hurts?:: no, but i heard its great!!Been in love?:: nopeBeen close to love?:: nopeBeen to a casino?:: yesRan over an animal and killed it?:: no but i ran over an already dead something...Broken a bone?:: nopeGotten stitches?:: noHad a waterballoon fight in winter?:: noDrank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?:: noMade homemade muffins?::yesBitten someone?:: YesBeen to disneyland/disneyworld?:: NopeMore than 5 times?:: nopeBeen to niagra falls?:: nopeBurped in someones face?:: yesGotten the chicken pox?:: Yes

WHENS THE LAST TIME YOUBrushed your teeth:: yesterdayWent to the bathroom:: few hours ago....Saw a movie in theaters:: couple weeks agoRead a book:: last weekHad a snow day:: NeverHad a party:: last year :DHad a slumber party:: last yearMade fun of someone:: a minute ago... teeghans online!!Tripped in front of someone:: probly yesterdayWent to the grocery store:: day before yesterdayGot sick:: im always sickCursed:: the last timei spoke

How many friends do you have?:: i havnt countedWhat are their names?:: Do you have a best friend?:: i have many!! and by many i mean like 4Have you ever liked one of your friends?:: not the way youre thinking!!! dirty bitch....Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?:: bout the sameHave you ever lost a friend?:: yeah... noth through death, but yeahHave you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?:: does the melbourne show count?Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?:: we mae fun of things :|Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?:: not a big oneWhats the nicest thing youve ever done for a friend?:: *shrugs*Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?:: been friendsDo you miss any of your old friends?:: noWhat friend have you known the longest?:: caitlinDo you regret anything youve done to a friend?:: i dont think so.... :SIf so, what is it?:: How often do you spend time with your friends?:: as often as i canDo any of your friends drive?:: on their learners, yeahHas a friend of yours ever died?:: noWhats the dumbest thing youve done with a friend?:: there are too manyWhat do you think your friends think of you?:: probly thatim a stupid tool

LOVE AND ALL THAT CRAP

Have you ever been in love?:: nopeIf you have, with who?:: Are you single?:: yepAre you in a relationship?:: noIf so, for how long?:: Do you believe there is someone for everyone?:: i guess soWhat is your idea of the best date?:: *shrugs*What was your first kiss like?:: umm... ok...?How old were you when you got your first kiss?:: i dont remember!!Do you think love is a load of shit?:: some people take it too far...Whats the best experiance youve ever had with the opposite sex?:: i dunno!If you are single, have you had any boyfriends/girlfriends before?:: yepHave you ever been dumped?:: i think so... its complicated...Have you ever dumped someone?:: yeaWhats the most sexual thing youve done with the opposite sex?:: slept together.... but we didnt have sex!!

What is your favourite genre of music?:: comedy and green day! (they have their own genre)What time is it now?:: 8:37What day is it?:: April 10th- happy birthday teeghan!!Whens the last time you called someone?:: this afternoonHow much money do you have right now?:: bout $100... has to last me ages thoAre you hungry?:: just had tea so noWhatcha doin?:: this gay question thingDo you like parades?:: yes.... and giraffesDo you like the moon?:: yeaWhat are you going to do when youre done with this?:: watch tvIsnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: yes, yes it is.... but then again so is hillIf you could have any magical power what would it be?:: telekinesis, or i'd have xray specksHave you ever had a picnic?:: yesDid you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: i beg your pardonWhat about sock em boppers?:: no but im starting to wish i did...Are you wearing any socks right now?:: no... but i had a headband on before

DO YOU THINK YOU AREfunny?:: rarely... and not on purpose, i just say stupid thingspretty?:: nopsarcastic?:: usually towards my sisterlazy?:: definatelyhyper?:: every so oftenfriendly?:: yeahevil?:: only every secong day in junesmart?:: nnnnooooostrong?:: lol hell notalented?:: no!!dorky?:: probably

WOULD YOU EVERSky dive?:: hell yesPlay strip poker?:: yesRun away?:: noCurse at a teacher?:: yeah if i was that madNot take a shower for a week?:: noAsk someone out?:: yepLie to someone to make them think better of you?:: nopVisit a foreign country for more than a month?:: yeahGo scuba diving?:: yeahWrite a book?:: if i got that boredBecome a rockstar?:: yeahHave casual sex?:: hell yes!!

LAST QUESTIONSWhat shampoo do you use?:: whatevers in the showerWhens the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?:: come here and ask me thatWhat kind of computer do you have?:: one that has all these gay surveys on itWhat grade are you in?:: 11Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?:: hee hee yeahOr just make out?:: yeah that tooHow many posters do you have in your room?:: 2 actual posters, but theres heaps of shit on my wallsHow many cds do you have?:: lotsWhat time is it now?:: 10:29 ( i was doing other stuff in between!)

You're the sad smile,the one that regrets nearlyeverything and is constantly wondering aboutwhat could have been.You're not happy with yoursituation and usually blame yourself because ofthe bad things that have happened.Cheer up.