Tourist Trapped: Stern Grove Festival

The Stern Grove Festival has been bringing free music concerts to a stunning grove in San Francisco for 76 seasons. I’m embarrassed to admit that I had never been. Located in the Sigmund Stern Grove which seems really far away from civilization, Stern Grove offers free concerts all summer. And they’re good concerts. Oh, the free shows I’ve missed.

photo by Scott Wall, courtesy of Stern Grove

This year, I snagged an invitation to The Big Picnic, which is Stern Grove’s fundraising lunch on Opening Day. At the Big Picnic, lots of very fancy people dress like they’re from Newport, Rhode Island and spend $250 to buy their children lunch. Needless to say, I found the whole thing fabulous. Catered by the Willie Brown-endorsed McCall’s catering, I spent most of my lunch taking Instagram photos of giant wheels of cheese and men in pastel pants. I also encountered Congresswoman Jackie Speier by ONE OF THE quiche buffets and managed not to ask her about Jonestown.

Subtle.

After lunch, we wandered over to the Grove, where thousands of folks had set up cozy picnics and blankets and chairs. Right then and there, I decided I’d be coming to as many Stern Grove shows as I could, no matter who was performing. I started to think of transportation options in my head, because the parking-less schlep had really been my only barrier to attending. Feeling the community vibe inside the Grove got me over my need for valet parking. (Lies.)

We got to sit at a reserved table surrounded by the pastel pants people, and I would have been just as happy arriving early and perched on a well-placed blanket because we were going to get to see Michael McDonald. I love Michael McDonald, and have ever since I saw Running Scared. As soon as he came on stage, I had a tough time composing myself. Then, when Michael McDonald sang “Sweet Freedom”, I turned into a mom-jeans dancer, pumping my fists like I was remembering my yacht-rock glory days of 1986. I was 8 in 1986.

Sundays with Nancy.

Thankfully, there was someone in the Grove to out mom-dance me. And that someone was House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi. I believe it was during the song, “Takin’ It To The Streets” that Leader Pelosi stood up and joined her husband in raising the roof. Our whole section kept gasping. “Oh my God, she’s doing it again. Nancy Pelosi is raising the roof.”

Nance wasn’t the only one. Nearly the entire theater, including people hanging of rocks and sitting in trees, were dancing, clapping their hands, and raising the roof. It is impossible not to dance to “Takin’ It To The Streets.” I’m listening to it as I type this post, and I… here I go!

Taking It To The Hill.

After Michael McDonald’s flawlessly sensitive and masculine performance, there was a 20-minute intermission and then local legend Boz Scaggs took the stage. We kicked back, and even though it was a bit foggy, the Grove enclosed everyone in organic warmth keeping away the chill. I people-watched, sipped my Tejava, promised myself I’d come back to Stern Grove a lot this summer, and wondered if Michael McDonald ever remembered that he’s not in love anymore.