Carrie Underwood Leg Show in Short Shorts on Today

Sure, American women were glued to The Today Show to watch happy family safe Carrie Underwood performing on national TV, meanwhile, in the Egotastic! offices, we were staring catatonic at her long shiny legs wondering just how we might make them shinier.

There are boob men, and there are butt men, but let us never forget the leg men who live in the shadows of ogling fetishists. A shadow somewhere in my neighborhood. Enjoy.