Casey Chan  Disney's Star Tours Star Wars simulator ride has gone through a renovation and has re-opened...with a parody of TSA checkpoints. It makes waiting in line a lot more enjoyable as Jedis are walking by, luggage is being sorted and Droids are yelling at you.

Specifically:

The second room of the queue is now a security check area, similar to a TSA checkpoint. The two G-series droids are still there, G2-9T scanning luggage and G2-4T scanning passengers...

While we won't tell you why, you'll enjoy paying a lot of attention to what the scans of the luggage show is inside. When it's your turn to go through the passenger scan (a thermal body scan), you may be verbally accosted by a security droid. Also, keep an eye out in the queue for an earlier version of RX-24 ("Captain Rex") from the original Star Tours; he's labeled "defective" and has some familiar dialogue.

As most of us are forced to deal with the TSA when we travel, it's pretty funny to see Disney mocking them through imitation. [Schneier via BoingBoing]

I cannot even believe I am reading this shit! The Disney Illuminuts are really exposing themselves as a Nazi/Stasi conditioning operation to brainwash children into the Comittee of 300's "world view". So a new attraction at the "Stae Wars" themed rides now has fricking robots thermal scanning infants and children as part of a "fun family adventure". Show this to everyone so they realize the TSA rape scanners are just part of a huge long term agenda involving the conditioning of children at the largest child mind control facility on the planet.

Last Friday night, cast members were among the first to preview the revised Star Tours—The Adventures Continue at Disney's Hollywood Studios. After the conclusion of the next morning's cast previews, the ride went into a soft-opening status to the general public, and has been open for previews since that time. It is expected to remain in soft-open status until final preparations are under way for the Thursday night media preview (7-9:30 p.m.) The major infrastructure of the attraction is unchanged, though the decor and technology has all been updated. The queue path remains the same, the ride vehicles and exit pathway are as they were before. The StarSpeeder 3000 has gotten a new paint job and color scheme to turn it into the StarSpeeder 1000, and R2-D2 and C-3PO are both still in the same location, though 3PO's replaced leg is once again its original gold color. This is to bring the story back to an earlier era, and so everything looks newer. The giant departures board is still there, as well.

The second room of the queue is now a security check area, similar to a TSA checkpoint. The two G-series droids are still there, G2-9T scanning luggage and G2-4T scanning passengers. For those attraction junkies, you'll remember that the G-series droids are so named because in the original Disneyland Park version of the ride, they were created by removing the "skins" from two of the goose animatronics from the soon-to-close America Sings attraction (Goose = "G" series). While we won't tell you why, you'll enjoy paying a lot of attention to what the scans of the luggage show is inside. When it's your turn to go through the passenger scan (a thermal body scan), you may be verbally accosted by a security droid. Also, keep an eye out in the queue for an earlier version of RX-24 ("Captain Rex") from the original Star Tours; he's labeled "defective" and has some familiar dialogue.

The new pre-boarding video no longer shows park guests as being among the passengers, as this is now the first time that departures are leaving from the new Earth station. You'll want to watch this video closely for maximum enjoyment. The new 3-D glasses are different from those used in the other four theme park 3-D movies, and are reportedly more comfortable and provide more complete 3-D viewing.

Once aboard, there are several variables in play that will help to create a new experience each time that you ride. In addition to guest interactivity (similar to Laugh Floor's "that guy," with two different possible labels), there are four major variables that contribute to the 54 ride variations. The ride will feature two interactions with Star Wars characters, at the beginning and middle of your journey, and you'll visit two different destinations—one on each side of your middle character interaction. Your first interaction will be with the Empire, and the second with the Jedi or Rebels. The first stop will be either Hoth, Kashyyyk, or Tatooine, and the second destination will be Naboo, Coruscant, or the Death Star above the planet Geonosis. We're also hearing that the interaction with Jar-Jar Binks will be the most satisfying to those who are not fans of the character.

MousePlanet's Adrienne Vincent-Phoenix will be at the media preview on Thursday night and the opening moment on Friday, so we'll have lots more for you next week. Meanwhile, if you'd like to watch the opening moment yourself but won't be at Walt Disney World on Friday, you'll be able to watch it online. The event will be webcast beginning at 10 a.m. on Friday on both the Star Tours Facebook page and the Disney Parks YouTube page. Check the Disney Parks Blog for more details on the webcast as they're released.

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All eyes are opened, or opening, to the rights of man. The general spread of the light of science has already laid open to every view the palpable truth, that the mass of mankind has not been born with saddles on their backs, nor a favored few booted and spurred, ready to ride them legitimately