Ahh, coffee… it’s a love/hate relationship for me. On the one hand, I love the ritual of it, the soothing process that goes into making that morning cup of joe: grinding the beans, boiling and pouring the water — even the few minutes’ anticipation as I let it steep. On the other hand, I get fairly antsy once I’ve had it. I can definitely feel my heart rate go up, I crave more immediately after, and I pee an insane amount. Deep down, despite all the conflicting information available on the internet, I feel that coffee is not good for me, but I continue to drink it. I often take breaks from it, but sooner or later, I’m back on the coffee wagon. As I have mentioned before in some of my previous articles, however, I’m skeptical of anything that is so heavily popularized and promoted in the media.

The Coffee Deception

Not to disappoint you — trust me, this information is disappointing to me too — but I’d rather know the truth than continue living a lie. There are many articles floating around the web that claim there are many benefits to drinking coffee, but there don’t seem to be nearly as many addressing the potential health risks involved. So, sorry to be the bearer of bad news, and as my friends often say when I provide them with undesirable information, “Alanna ruins everything,” but here are 13 truths about coffee that you need to know.

1. Drinking coffee can promote the release of the hormone that is often referred to as “the stress hormone,” cortisol, which is known to be linked to adrenal fatigue. This can cause you to feel drained and tired on a regular basis.

2. Brain imaging studies of those who drink coffee excessively every day showed that they actually presented the same deterioration of their brains as chronic alcoholics, cigarette smokers, Parkinson’s sufferers, and heavy marijuana users.

3. If you are a coffee drinker, then you will know about coffee’s magical ability to help… erm… keep you regular in the morning, but did you know this bathroom time is one way that the body tries to eliminate toxins from the system? If you can’t go before your joe, then you could have some digestive health issues to address!

4. Caffeine is an alkaloid that is used by the coffee plant to kill any bugs that eat its seeds. Caffeine in the coffee pods also kills any surrounding plants so that the coffee plant can have access to more sunlight and therefore grow larger. This means that caffeine is a pesticide, causing genetic termination in living cells that come into contact with it.

5. Although it may seen like coffee is increasing your energy, it’s actually a bit more complicated and sinister than that; coffee appears to increase energy by activating the fight or flight metabolic response, which causes a host of health problems we’d be better off avoiding.

6. Coffee, along with many other items that are typically roasted, contain a known-carcinogen called acrylamide. Enough said.

7. Consumption of coffee can have a huge impact on your sleep and the caffeine content can keep you up. You may already know to not drink coffee too late in the day, but how much you are drinking during the day may also have an effect. If you have a hard time falling asleep you may want to consider cutting back on your coffee intake during the day as well.

8. If you are currently on a birth control pill, you should know that it inhibits the body’s ability to break down caffeine and eliminate it from your system, making you slightly more susceptible to caffeine poisoning. If you are on the pill you may want to consider drastically cutting back or cutting out your coffee consumption altogether.

10. Drinking coffee in excess (5 cups a day or more) can actually lead to weight gain, and although it is unclear whether or not excess consumption causes cellulite, many believe that it contributes to it. It does this because it is a diuretic, which means it forces water out of the body and therefore causes dehydration, which leads to cellulite.

11. Here’s the real kicker: There is absolutely no actual benefit to drinking coffee. Oh boy, have we ever been led astray. I know you don’t want to believe it, and neither do I, but the truth is the truth whether you or I want to believe it or not. This statement is based on an investigation conducted by research and clinical nutritionist Stephen Cherniske, who took it upon himself to review countless pieces of coffee research. He concluded there is no real evidence to prove that coffee actually benefits the body in any way. According to Cherniske, the positive promotion of coffee consumption is a blatant lie that is harmful to our society. He also concluded that there is a powerful, covert, and secret “coffee lobby” (not surprising) which has a lot invested in keeping these dangers hidden. His book is called “Caffeine Blues: Wake Up To The hidden Dangers Of America’s #1 Drug.“

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Conclusion

So, I don’t know about you, but after finding out all of that information, I’m definitely going to start cutting down and eventually eliminating coffee from my diet. It is important to know that caffeine in any form will have these same effects; however, most teas don’t have even close to as much caffeine as coffee, so they are a much better, if not entirely safe, alternative, especially if you are trying to ween off or quit. Who’s with me?

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