Семейное дело

$24 for a cab ride to the Bronx.
I can't believe it.
Come to my parents' for Passover
once a year without complaining, Vito.
Wait a minute, honey, let me help you.
- Will Adam be here?
- I don't know...
...but if he is, be nice.
It's a Seder, okay?
Don't worry, don't worry.
- Hi, Mom.
- Hello, darling.
- Adam. Hi, darling.
- Hi.
Come a little late like always.
Papa, hello, darling.
Traffic. There are so many Jews
headed for Seder, Mama.
- Good day, sir.
- Hiya, Nat.
I thought people were
cutting down on meat.
How come the material
gets more expensive every year?
Please, don't worry yourself.
I know the face, now.
The face... The face looks familiar.
- Hey, Pop.
- Adam, how are you?
Hey, who'd you get this year?
I got Bernard Karlinski.
Let me see here.
"The bar mitzvah of Owen Zuckerbrot."
Nat, Owen Zuckerbrot?
He brings the yarmulkes home
from shul. You know, the extras.
You want it to say
"Vito McMullen," you have to convert.
- Why not?
- Not yet.
Did you see how Adam remembers
his Hebrew? With a mind like that.
- Ma.
- What did I say?
It's a shande to me that
a boy with such a head...
...drops out of school six months
before a master's degree.
- Drops out? Drops out of school?
- Six months before.
- Three months.
- Can we drop it?
We're not allowed to ask? You're back
since January. I haven't seen you.
- I came here for a Seder.
- Adam looks marvelous.
- We're glad you're here.
- He's become a man.
- Look how beautifully he eats.
- Ma, please. He's gonna be 23.
Stop bragging about how he gets
all the food in his mouth.
- You try to kvell over your grandson.
- I won't complain.
- After 24 years, it's still rough.
- 23.
Forgot the year your goy son-in-law
wasn't allowed up here.
- Time to let the angel in.
- Nat, how come the angel...
...gets a bigger glass?
- Your material is getting stale.
Better leave the chain on.
This is the Bronx.
Instead of Elijah, some mugger
is gonna charge through the door.
- Adam's right.
- When you two gonna move out?
- You're too old to survive here.
- How old are you, Grandpa?
- Nobody kept records. No one knows.
- They'll never tell. Crazy superstition.
Not so crazy. You don't tempt God
by bragging about your age. Sit.
Forty-two years here,
the neighborhood is not so bad.
Then why can't I drive my
Cadillac to your Seder? Nat...
...there are places in Flushing.
If it's a matter of money...
...I can chip in a few bucks.
- They wanna be the last.
We'll chisel it on your stone
after the mugging.
"Nat and Rose Gruden, last Jews
on Davidson Avenue."
Gruden residence.
Hi, Jessie.
Well, what time do you think
you'll be out?
Okay, no problem.
Yeah, don't worry about it.
All right. Take care, Jessie.
- Your grandfather?
- What was that about, Adam?
Jessie wanted to wish us
a happy Passover.
- Vito, your father knows our number?
- Yeah, how come?
Well, the unexpected.
Jessie doesn't change, huh?
No, he sure doesn't.
Take care, Nat.
Vito, see if you can get a cab,
I'll be right out.
- So when are you moving, Grandma?
- We don't take from our children.
You're like a couple of turkeys
in these streets.
This neighborhood's a jungle.
I'm not coming to the next Seder
unless you're living somewhere else.
Did you hear what your grandson said?
Well, what did he want?
Jessie wanted to wish us
a happy Passover.
Come on, Adam, stop the crap.
Your old man needs bail money.
I'm gonna go down there.
- And he calls you.
- Yeah.
You been talking to my father while you
been ducking me since you got back?
All right. Is it serious?
It's a bar fight. But it's
an off-duty cop he whacked.
He whacked a cop?
Is the guy hurt?
Well, Grandpa says he
"kicked the bull's ass...
...the length of the bar
and halfway down 10th Ave."
When is he gonna let up?
Oh, Christ.
Well, what the hell, it's nice
to know I have strong genes.
Hope I'm getting pinched
for bar fights in my 60s.
Just remember,