Desperately Seeking Stupid

Yes, it’s that time of year again — time to send me your suggestion for the stupidest items available for sale on Internets 3-7 for my annual Holiday Survival Guide for Slackers. See previous Slacker Guides here: 2002, 2003, & 2004. If you’ve found something so stuplime that it merits inclusion, send me an email at matthew@defectiveyeti.com, or mention it in the comments to this post. Thanks!

37 thoughts on “Desperately Seeking Stupid”

I’m not sure if this is really stupid, but did you know that people are spending good money to buy imaginary money for use in MMOG’s? Ebay has 280+ lots of ISK (the currency of EVE Online) for sale at the moment. When we say “Get a life”, we need to specify “get a *real* life”!

The Handi-Cleanse Personal Hygiene System is a hand held bidet sprayer. This product attaches to any standard tank toilet and no plumber is required to set it up. Handi-Cleanse cleans & refreshes, is easy to install and use, is for anal and vaginal use, and for elderly & physically challenged people. This contains no harmful chemicals and is doctor recommended.

Ok, its from “shopinprivate.com” so… uh, you can buy it privately, which is suggested ultimately. Secondly, um, WHICH doctor recommends a rigged up bidet for old people? Thirldly, I just love that it requires a set of pliers and comes with a STOPPER PLUG. Mmm, where to use them….

No joke, ‘When worn, the SenSlip will provide immediate protection.
Irritation or friction to the penis will cease, and the surface
of the glans and any remaining foreskin on the penile shaft
will slowly become dekeratinized’

Life is in the timing. I was all set to hit the top of your charts but I’m about 30 minutes late. I’ll have to limp in with a weak suggestion of a Toothbrush Sterilizer.http://www.brandsonsale.com/toothbrush-sterilizer.html
Bet you didn’t know this was a critical lack in your life.

For when you want a jersey that looks like a Phillies jersey, but really says “Philippians” or a LeBron-look-a-like that really says “Kings James”. And for when you want to get made fun of mercilessly.