Learning The Fine Art of Going With The Flow

If you’re not First, you’re Last!

I’ve never been a huge fan of “Participation” ribbons. They started in the late 1970s to early 1980s and I remember them at Track and Field, right around this time of year.

Some years, I’d never be in the top four in a given event, but I’d still come home with that blue or white or yellow “Participant” ribbon. I hated it. Who cares that you showed up? I wanted to be good enough to actually get a red (First), blue (Second) or white (Third) ribbon. I never liked the idea of conforming or being just like the rest of the kids, so being handed a ribbon that every other kid was getting was NOT working for me.

In the following decades, Participating became a real achievement. They even made MEDALS for it! I watched my kids bring home wheelbarrow loads of Participation medallions that hang sadly in the corner of their rooms. They are prized or valued. They are dust collectors. I guess that’s the problem when your mom isn’t into participation so much as she is into TRYINGYOURFREAKIN’BEST!

As I have said numerous times, I’m not about perfection, but I am about giving YOUR best EFFORT. If my very best wasn’t as good as your best, then I bloody well want you to get the ribbon for winning, because then I’m going to work harder to whip your butt the next time!

Which reminds me of one of my all time favourite lines in a movie….

Not exactly what I believe in, but it’s still a great line.

The Big Guy and I have never been the types of parents to tell our kids that they were “the best” at something merely because they were our children, or to make them feel better about themselves. I know several occasions where First Born Son or Second Born Son would come to one of us, crestfallen that they hadn’t received an award they were coveting at school, or hockey, or softball. Sometimes the kid who did get the award was no more deserving, which just added insult to injury, but when the recipient was deserving (which was most of the time) I’d show my offspring why I could see the justice in the decision. Maybe the winner studied harder, practiced more, was more consistent in their efforts. You put in the work, you bring home the hardware – if that’s what you want out of life.

Which is what made last week so very special.

SBS has really embraced his artistic side. His weekly art classes are his favourite times of the week and he spends just about every free moment doing this….

Artist at work!

He has taken over the dining room, and is often found drawing while listening to YouTube videos about the latest Marvel film or comic book release.

His talent is unmistakeable. And remember, I’m not a gusher!

Original on left, SBS’s rendition on the right…crazy, right?

And this…

Each year there is an art show where all the students, young and old, display their pieces and invite their friends and family to see their work. It’s a lovely evening at the teacher’s studio, spilling out into the back yard.

This year was no different, except for one small detail. SBS won the big award of the evening, Most Improved Artist! The award recognized SBS’s dedication and hard work which was so evident in his art. I loved this for two reasons – one, he was competing against himself, which means he ends up being better, and two, because I don’t believe art can really be judged one piece against another, this award was about the artist’s growth and not his work in comparison to others’.

He received hardware AND a certificate! Here we have the artist pose with a sample of his body of work.

And the cherry on the top was that he sold one of his pieces that very night!

Bye Buh Spider Man!

But what made it so important to SBS was that while he didn’t expect it, he realized after that he was deserving. Isn’t that what makes winning so sweet?

The Big Wee-ner!

The hardware now sits in a place of honour in the living room, for all to see and admire! 🙂