Wednesday, January 27, 2010

MAPP #7

Last night was ‘panel night’ at MAPP class. Jim and I brought along my sister Donna and our sister-in-law (Jim’s brother’s wife) Emily. It was a VERY interesting and informative night. The panel was made up of several people who have been through the adoption process that we’re going through now, so they had all been in our shoes at one time or another.

There were a total of seven people on the panel. There was one same-sex couple (male), one married couple, two wives (whose husbands couldn’t make the meeting), and an adoption social worker. They all shared their stories from beginning to end with us, and after each family spoke, we were able to ask whatever questions we wanted of them. The stories ran the gamut from quick and simple adoptions to adoptions that were a bit more of a challenge.

One woman was telling us that after she was placed with her second child (who she was hoping to adopt) his birth mother did a complete 180 and got her act together. So, after a year of him being with her family, she had to ‘return’ him to his birth mother. However, after being reunited with his birth mother for only a month, the birth mother (who, in the meantime had yet ANOTHER baby) quickly realized that she couldn’t handle a 2 year old and a 2 month old so, he ended up going back to the adoptive family for good. Happy ending!!

The rest of the couples had a lot of great information to share, especially concerning open adoptions and their experiences with them. The adoption social worker shared a lot of really great, specific information in that area as well, which was very helpful.

The most exciting part of the night was when Jim and I learned that Krystal, (not her real name; but from now on I will refer to her a ‘K’) who is one of our MAPP class leaders, is going to be the social worker assigned to our case!!! This is great news because not only do we really like her, but she’s been in class with us from the very beginning and we already know one another. We’ve heard from lots of people how important it is to have a good relationship with your case worker since she’s the person who’s going to be out there ‘representing’ us when children become available, so we’re thrilled that we get to work with her.

Before the panel discussion began, she came over to Jim and me and said “You guys know that I’m in charge of your case, right? Since you guys want an infant I’m going to be doing your home study first (of all the couples in the class), so next week I’ll bring in my book and we can schedule a meeting!!” Jim and I both gave and enthusiastic “Great!....OK!!” and then I instantly became terrified. Oh my GOD this is really happening. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!Jim and I just turned to each other and laughed. Not only are we getting ‘K’ as our case worker, but she’s writing our home study FIRST. Yikes.Granted…that doesn’t mean anything in the long run – we could still be waiting months and months for a child…..but the sooner the home study is finished, the sooner we’re ‘out there’ and ready to be matched.

Next week is our final MAPP class…..and then the REAL fun begins. Stay tuned…...