** This post contains affiliate links. I am compensated for purchases made through these links at no additional cost to you.

After decluttering most of my wardrobe during the nesting phase of pregnancy, I was not left with much to wear during the fall and winter at seven months postpartum. I wanted to buy some basics that I could wear for the colder season here in Chicago while I’m essentially in hibernation mode. I never go too crazy with shopping, and this haul is a lot for me to purchase at once, but I needed clothes to boost my self-esteem and help me feel more like a person and not a “mombie.” I’m sharing some of my finds because many of them might be on sale for Black Friday, plus they were already affordable.

My fall/winter postpartum clothing haul:

Cozy pullover sweater: I bought this one in the Wine color, but it also comes in many other options. It’s super soft and comfortable. It’s not itchy at all!

Faux fur sweater vest:This is the coziest sweater vest with pockets and a hood. It was affordable at about $22. I have been wearing it nonstop! (This color is sold out but it comes in gray and black, too.)

Black midrise skinny jeans. Black jeans are a staple in my wardrobe. These are a good length for me and they are comfortable enough to wear every day. (I bought them in short.) Note: I also purchased Universal Thread jeggings, but I’m not sure I recommend them, because they stretch too much throughout the day, or maybe I needed to size down.

Cozy open cardigan: This is the softest cardigan, and I wear it frequently. I picked the light gray color, which goes with just about anything I have. (It’s on sale for a limited time for $20.)

Pajama set: I’ve been feeling so frumpy in my mismatched T-shirt and comfy pants to go to bed. Now I feel more put together and this set is soft and cute. (I prefer shorts to sleep in because I run hot.) My friend was also kind enough to gift me a second pajama set that comes with a nursing top. The pants are so lightweight and soft.

Scallop sleeve sweater:It’s flattering and soft, but I wish the sleeves were full length. I bought it in gray so it can match just about everything.

Whether it’s because I could not find anyone available to go with me or because I wanted to go alone, I have done many things by myself throughout the years. One example was this week when I attended Michelle Obama’s Becoming book tour kickoff in Chicago on a solo night out. I originally asked a friend to go with me, but I wasn’t able to find two tickets together and decided to just go for it when a single ticket popped up in my search results. I asked on my Instagram stories whether my friends would go to a big event or concert on their own as well, and I found that more than a third of respondents said they would not. I get it, but I want to share reasons why doing activities alone is good for you, in my opinion.

Activities I have done alone:

John Legend concert

Movies

Dabble.co classes

Baseball games

Races

Major public events, like the Arizona Centennial celebration

Reasons to do things alone:

You’re not really alone. I was in a stadium of thousands of mostly women who clearly had common interests as me. Just because you don’t personally know them doesn’t mean there isn’t a great deal of love and respect in the room. I could feel it and see it in all the smiling faces.

You can make friends.

Growth happens when you’re uncomfortable.

You can avoid distractions. Oftentimes when we are with friends we are so wrapped up in conversation that we miss some of what is happening. When you are alone you observe things you might have missed.

You can spend time with your thoughts.

Attend on your own terms. Leave whenever you want. Eat wherever you want beforehand. You get to decide without compromise.

Do you enjoy doing things alone? Of course, spending time with friends and family doing activities you enjoy is also fun, but if you haven’t already, I encourage you to break out on your own once in a while. You might learn something new about yourself.

** This post contains affiliate link. I am compensated for purchases made through these links at no additional cost to you. Thanks for supporting Floradise!

Time is a precious commodity right now. Well, let’s face it, it always has been, but especially now with two kids, a full-time job and blogging. I’ve been focusing on finding ways to spend my time more intentionally lately and I want to share some of what’s been working for me.

Ways to save time:

Sign up for subscriptions for things you buy all the time, especially if there’s a discount. I have a subscription for diapers that I set to ship every four weeks so that I don’t even need to think about it.

Prioritize and then use time blocking for similar tasks. I do this for cleaning and blogging, but it can work for any aspect of your life. I put off cleaning certain parts of the house until I have a free window of time and try not to stress about not it.

Declutter and shop less. The less stuff you have, the less time you spend maintaining, cleaning and organizing it. Too much of our time is spent putting things away or trying to find our stuff.

Simplify your time commitments. Analyze whether you can cut back on activities. Is there anything you can cancel?

Outsource tasks if you can afford it. Or divide and conquer with time blocking or with other people in your household. Graham and I do this with household tasks or even with taking care of both girls. He might get V ready for bed, for example, while I get A to sleep.

Meal plan or cook easy meals. I am not a meal planner but of course it can save time during the week. I choose to save time by simplifying my meals so I’m not spending more than 20 minutes preparing dinner. I have tried a meal delivery service in the past and enjoyed it.

Use services like Shipt when needed. Maybe shopping this week is the task you need to outsource. I’ve recently been using Shipt to order essentials from stores like Target. You can order from other stores as well. I have used Shipt several times in the past months and it’s been a life saver, especially when Graham would take the car to work but I needed some things from the store. (We are a single car household.) You can search for the items you need or put in a spcial request if you don’t see it online. Once your cart is complete, you select an available one-hour time window for delivery. A shopper then claims your delivery and you receive a text from him/her. While shopping, he or she might send a text if an item is not in stock. The shopper can select a substitution with your permission, or you can skip that item. Then he or she checks out and lets you know he or she is on the way. Easy! My drivers have been courteous and so friendly. I was carrying the baby, so they set my items on my table or counter for me. A tip is not required but is always appreciated. (You can add it online once you rate the shopper afterward.) By the way, Shipt is available in 170 cities and counting. Also, my membership was free for six months with a promotion at a store and shipping is free with orders over $35. I only order if I need that much.

My baby registries were minimal compared with those I have seen others make. Nonetheless, I ended up not needing everything I registered for. I’m still grateful for everything I was given and for the gift cards used to buy my baby items, but I could have done without some of them because they ended up not being used as much as I’d hoped. All babies are different, though, and what didn’t work for us could work quite well for others. My point is that for some baby items you can wait until the baby is born to find out whether you need them. If you want to be more minimalist, you could choose not purchase them (or register for them) at all since you can always change your mind later. And you might save some cash!

Baby Items We Didn’t Need:

Pacifiers. A never took one. I waited until she was a month old (at least) to offer one to her and she was never interested. She has only used one a couple of times, and that was during our flights to and from Phoenix. I’m shocked she even took a pacifier then, but I’m glad she did to help with her ear pressure discomfort.

Nursing cover. I have only used this once for actually nursing in public. It turned out I could most often use a nursing room or another private room to nurse. I have also nursed in my car in desperate times. Other times I have have just pumped before going out in public and have given her a bottle. She luckily has always taken a bottle, but I know some babies do not. I still carry the cover with me in my bag at all times, but I have used it for covering her up in her car seat more than nursing.

Rocker. This was the biggest waste of money. She only used it in the beginning, and even then she didn’t like it that much.

Booties and mittens. These fall off and get lost. I have never really used the mittens. The booties I use sometimes, but it’s easier to just get footed bottoms or pajamas. I won’t say they are a total waste, but you don’t need to get a bunch. Unless you want to, of course!

Milk storage bags. I had high hopes of storing lots of breast milk for a rainy day. I have only been able to save about two weeks’ worth of milk, but then a growth spurt happened and I went right through it. I have since not been able to store any. I pump just enough to feed her for the day.

Also, an item I am glad I didn’t register for or purchase: a wipe warmer. I thought I would need one, but I didn’t know which one to get so I ended up waiting. Guess what? We managed just fine without one. Our baby didn’t get more upset during the night changings.

Take this post with a grain of salt, because all babies need different things. If you want to purchase something, by all means do so! Was there a baby item you ended up not needing? Let me know in the comments!

In the past seven months I have realized I have not been as supportive as I should have been to my friends and family who have given birth. I didn’t realize this until my postpartum experience showed me how much support new moms need and how I have fallen short in helping in the past. I wish I had taken more opportunities to help my friends and family who have had babies by doing such things as I have listed below. If you have a new mom in your life and you don’t know how you can be helpful, consider the following ways in which you can show them support. These methods would also be ways to support anyone going through a major life transition, not just adding a new baby.

Ways to support new moms:

Send gift cards for food, or drop off a meal. You can also organize a meal train.

Offer to come over and hold the baby or entertain older kids while the new mom showers, gets ready for the day, naps– whatever she’d like to do.

Ask how she’s feeling and listen. You don’t need to say much or have all the answers. Just listen.

Ask about topics other than the baby or kids as well.

Offer to do a chore or household task, cook a meal, pick up groceries or run an errand.

Send a care package of postpartum or self-care products.

Walk the dog(s) or offer to care for any other pets.

Buy them a gift certificate for a massage. They might not use it right away but it would be something to look forward to when they can.

Help them research postpartum or breastfeeding support groups, if needed.

Offer to go shopping with them if they want to treat themselves to postpartum clothes.

I’ve had a lot of postpartum thoughts on my mind lately, but I’ve been hesitant to share them. I don’t want to come across as complaining, because in fact I am grateful for my family, my work situation and my life in general.

I was hesitant to share this motherhood post because so many moms are shamed when they speak about how they feel or what struggles they are having. You can have prayed for a baby for years and still have challenges to overcome, and the following are mine. I don’t really know where to start, so I’ll break this postpartum thoughts post into categories:

Sleep

I was blessed with plenty of sleep from the time A was 2 months until almost exactly 4 months. At that point she started waking up several times each night. Some nights it would be every hour; some nights it would just be once or twice. On some occasions she would go right back to sleep, and other nights she would be awake for hours. Everyone told me when she was born that I would eventually get more sleep, so I naively expected that would have happened by now. The fact that the sleep situation has gotten worse has been a shock to the system. I work as an editor, so I need to be mentally prepared for each workday. I also work from home while caring for my baby and sometimes also my 4-year-old if she isn’t in school. On mornings when I have had a rough night I am totally useless. I don’t follow my own advice to get ready for the day or even eat a good breakfast. I have to do a minimum of 10 things for my girls before I can even grab myself a drink of water or put on my clothes for the day. This kind of living takes its toll on my mental health. I begin to think that I am failing as a mother because I have not properly “sleep trained” my baby. These mornings put me behind on my blog work, my full-time job and my daily housework. I said when she was born that I would not sleep train until she was 6 months old and that time has come. I am not looking forward to it but after being reassured by our pediatrician I now feel hope that the sleep situation will improve soon. The bright spot to the many sleepless nights is that she looks so darn cute when she is falling asleep/fighting sleep and I look at her and think how I couldn’t have imagined a more perfect addition to our family. (She just needs to learn how to sleep!) This is all just temporary and I will miss these days when they pass. I already do miss the newborn stage, actually. I loved holding and cuddling her as much as I wanted.

Comparison

I have fallen into the comparison trap on many occasions. I know I shouldn’t, but I can’t help but feel like a bad mom when others post about their babies who are such good sleepers and perfectly nap trained. I often ask myself what I am doing wrong to keep my baby from getting the sleep she needs. I feel to blame for creating habits like nursing to sleep when everyone tells me it’s a no-no. You also don’t notice how often people post about sleep until you aren’t getting enough of it. When someone complains about an unexpected nap ruining their whole day I have to admit I feel envious. I would love a nap! I am trying to pull back on my time on social media, though it’s a challenge because I want to connect with others and promote my blog work. I am aiming to find a balance, or at least remind myself that others’ sleep patterns have nothing to do with me.

Emotions

I feel a thousand times better emotionally and more like myself than in months. But I struggled for at least three months with the blues. I don’t call it postpartum depression because I was not officially diagnosed or treated, but I felt sadness and anxiety on many days. It had nothing to do with my baby. In fact, every time I held her I felt so blessed to have her with us. She is truly the greatest gift, along with V. I was anxious because I felt unsure of what I was doing and I was alone a lot. I don’t have many friends or family members in Chicago, so I had little help. Graham worked a ton — sometimes 15 hour days and always on weekends. I had no breaks, not even five minutes to myself. This also took a toll on me as an introvert. I started to feel resentment, but it was no one’s fault. It was the hormones along with the drastic change of going from one adopted child to having two kids. To this day I cry when I hear the theme song from the TV show “Spirit”, which is a cartoon for kids, because it reminds me of being so depressed while letting V watch the show to distract her from seeing me shed tears. She is incredibly perceptive, though, and she knew I was having a tough time. She’s the sweetest child who would say, “It’s OK, Mommy.” It would turn into a vicious cycle because I would then feel guilty about having these feelings and letting them be known, especially to my oldest child. She deserves the best and I wasn’t always at my best.

Breastfeeding

Another contributor to how I felt was my initial struggles with breastfeeding. It’s gotten so much better, thankfully. I am proud to have surpassed my goal of breastfeeding for six months and now I plan to keep going. It’s a special time with A that I will forever cherish. I am grateful for the help I received from my lactation consultant to be able to do it. I have to be honest and say I have thought about weaning when I realized the habit I had created by nursing to sleep. I don’t really want to stop breastfeeding, but sometimes I have felt like life would be easier if I didn’t. When this happens I remember why I wanted to try in the first place and all the challenges I have overcome. A fun new development is that she tries to pull my glasses off while nursing. Ha!

Work

As hard as it can be to balance everything, I am truly grateful to be able to work from home. I wanted to work remotely for years before it happened and that was partly because I knew I would want to be home with my children. Going back to work was tough after 12 weeks of (unpaid) maternity leave, even if I didn’t actually have to leave the house. I can only imagine how difficult it could be for many moms who work out of the house. I felt like there was no way I would get everything done, but guess what? We have all survived after three months back at work. I have made my editing deadlines, even if it meant logging back on after bedtime or on weekends. As parents we have to make difficult sacrifices for our kiddos, but whether you are with them all day or not, the kids will be all right; they are resilient and so are we. This is what I keep reminding myself on days I don’t have it together. (I will share a separate post on how I get my work done while caring for my girls, if anyone is interested.)

Support

I think what finally helped me feel better was asking for help and telling people how I feel when they asked. I am someone who tries to do everything but it’s just not possible. Shortly after giving birth, my good friend whom I hadn’t spoken to in months called to ask how I was. I immediately started crying. (Thanks, hormones!) I was so touched that someone took the time to check on me and that she cared. That’s a wonderful way to offer support to someone in your life; just ask how they are and listen. I also had some family members who visited to help and that was amazing.

Body/Hair/Health

Somehow I missed the memo that I would lose a bunch of my hair starting around two or three months postpartum. I can definitely tell a difference in my hair line, but I have received reassurance from many people that my hair will go back to being healthy and full. As far as weight goes, I lost the 25 pounds I gained by six weeks postpartum, which was a huge surprise. My body will be forever changed though. If you look at my stomach you will see wrinkly skin and stretch marks that I’m pretty sure are here to stay. I have accepted this and think of it as a small price to pay for my huge gift. I won’t be wearing many two-piece bathing suits soon, though. Good thing it’s almost winter! (But if you have any tips on minimizing the marks, help a girl out.) I used to track my meals before and during pregnancy, mostly to make sure I was eating balanced meals, but that has gone out the window. My goal is to be back on track with eating well and working out by the time she turns 1. This is just a temporary period of my life being off track, and that’s OK. We need to give ourselves a break during times of transition.

Motherhood times two has been wonderful and I love spending time as a family of four. Has it been easy? Heck no! But it’s definitely been worth it and I’m grateful for both experiences of becoming of mom: adoption and pregnancy.

My point with this post is to show other moms that they are not alone, and the best thing to do is express your emotions in a healthy way instead of holding them inside. I want to be real vs. complain, and my aim has always been to be helpful in some way.

Have you experienced any of these feelings postpartum?

Note: If you are experiencing symptoms of postpartum depression, please talk to a health professional. Many health facilities offer postpartum support groups, and you can/should also share your feelings with friends and family.

My most recent Audible listen is “Whiskey in a Teacup” by Reese Witherspoon. It was a short book, so I finished it quickly. I’m sharing bits of what I liked about the book, which is part memoir and part how-to guide for hosting, for those looking for their next read (or listen).

While I did not grow up in the South, I have always been fascinated by the history, lifestyle and culture — at least how it is often depicted. I like the approach to hospitality and the focus on family. Reese Witherspoon’s “Whiskey in a Teacup: What Growing Up in the South Taught Me About Life, Love, and Baking Biscuits” painted a picture of life as a Southern woman, and I liked her enthusiasm for the topics she covers.

I learned a thing or two about hosting, for sure. I love that she gives recipes and ideas for hosting dinner parties and other events. I don’t often host people at our house because we don’t know many people in Chicago and most of our family is in either Arizona or Kentucky, but someday I would love to have more gatherings at our home, and her ideas for what to serve and how to host are genuinely helpful. (Well, they could use more vegetarian options, but she does suggest offering them.)

I was inspired by how family-oriented she is. I would love to adopt her idea of sharing each family member’s rose and thorn at dinner, during which each person would put away his or her phone and electronics. It’s not a new concept, of course, but we share that goal. That’s exactly how I want to raise my children.

Not all chapters were super captivating for me, but I enjoyed the book overall. Most of the dishes she mentions you’ve probably heard of before, but it’s worth checking out her take on them. (I have yet to make any, so I can’t discuss how good they are.) Also, there’s an entire section on monograms. I had no idea monograms were so important, but she sure seems passionate about them.

Reese Witherspoon really appreciates tradition, yet she seems progressive. I don’t think any of her opinions or statements would really offend anyone, although she does generalize about Southern women. I have always liked Reese Witherspoon, but I am even more fond of her now. She’s so charming! You don’t have to share much in common to enjoy her book. I also very much enjoyed hearing her accent.

Graham and I have been slowly making updates around the house in our limited time over the last three months. We would love to be able to tackle the kitchen renovation, but it’s not the right time for that yet. Instead we’ve been doing small upgrades wherever we can. Often these simple and cost-effective tasks completely transform a space. If you, too, are waiting on a major home renovation but want to make the house feel more like home, here are some possible fixes to make first:

Switch out the outlets and switch plates. Our house came with old, beige outlets and switches that looked dirty. Buying new white outlets and installing them ourselves (if you know how to do it safely) makes a room look more clean. We also upgraded the outlets next to our bed to have USB slots that make charger our phones and electronics easier. Game-changer!

Painting the walls and trim. Doing this yourself might be more work and will take more time than hiring someone, but it saves so much money and instantly gives any room a facelift. Our bedrooms were white, as are most of the walls in the house, and we’ve been having fun picking out new paint colors. So far we have finished painting two bedrooms. Painting the trim was such a time suck, but it looks a thousand times better in white than the natural wood color popular circa the 1990s.

It took several coats of primer and white paint to transform the trim in the bedrooms.

Remove old blinds and curtains and install new, more modern options. I absolutely hate the old style of mini blinds that are so pervasive in older homes. We bought 2.5-inch faux wood cordless blinds and installed them ourselves. They keep out a significant amount of light and look so much nicer. We haven’t installed new curtains yet because we are searching for the perfect picks, but that’s on the list.

Pressure wash the exterior. The house was empty for a couple of years before we moved in, so it needed to be cleaned inside and out. You can easily rent a pressure washer (or buy one) and it made an immediate impact on the outside of our home.

Remove outdated appliances or electronics. Our home came with an old radio attached to a kitchen cabinet. We removed that bad boy and gave ourselves more space. Perhaps you can wait on changing the refrigerator and range, if needed, but you can always upgrade things like the microwave for a lower cost.

Add plants! Nothing makes us feel more at home than new plants. They bring life to any space.

Are you planning any home updates? What would you like to do next to your home? Stay tuned for more home updates, including bedroom reveals when they are complete!

** This post is sponsored by Celestial Seasonings but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.

Now that it finally feels like fall in the Chicago area I’m ready to make our home more festive. I spent some time over the past week digging out our decor from the basement as well as picking up some new items. Now that we have more space there are more areas to decorate, so it’s been fun dreaming up what our home could look like for holidays and seasons for years to come. I am starting off slow, though, because I don’t want to buy too much. I’m sharing my affordable fall decor — so far — and how I add touches of autumn throughout our home in a non-overwhelming way.

I like to add neutral color pumpkins throughout the living room, including in front of the fireplace and on shelves and tables.

I added touches of fall to the dining table and kitchen, too. I find candles and table linens to be easy ways to be festive. It’s super affordable to buy some fall filling for a vase you already have, too. You can find low-cost signs, too, or make your own.

For me, the fall weather shift also means a transition to warm beverages. I have always been a fan of Celestial Seasonings’ Sleepytime tea, among other flavors, but I like to switch to other fall flavors when the new season starts. I picked up a new package of Sleepytime tea along with Vermont Maple Ginger on my recent Walmart shopping trip. I also like to purchase the Honey Vanilla Chamomile flavor when it’s available.

My favorite place to drink the tea is on the balcony adjoining our bedroom. I have been enjoying the cooler temperatures before they get too cold for my taste. There’s just something about sitting outside with my plants and watching the leaves start to fall. Those who care about our Earth will be happy to know that Celestial Seasonings tea is made with herbs, teas and botanicals that have been grown according to Earth-friendly practices. I also think it’s commendable that the tea comes packaged in natural fiber tea bags that don’t need a string, tag, staple or individual wrapper. According to Celestial Seasonings, doing this saves more than 3.5 million pounds of waste from entering landfills each year.

Later in the evenings I like to enjoy Sleepytime tea after putting the kids to bed. This is my precious time to myself that I look forward to every day. Sleepytime tea is a comforting staple that blends chamomile, spearmint and lemongrass to help me wind down after a long, busy day.

** This post is sponsored by Bona® but the content and opinions expressed here are my own.

Since buying our first home together in July, my husband and I have slowly been making updates to make the house more our style. One aspect of the house that we don’t want to change and that I have loved since the moment I stepped inside for the first time is the hardwood flooring. There’s just something about hardwood floors! I grew up in Arizona, where most homes had tile or carpet flooring. Living in a home with hardwood floors since moving to Chicago has been a new concept for me and I have had a lot to learn about taking care of them. Knowing how to clean our hardwood floors is essential for protecting and maintaining our investment. That’s why we use the Bona® Microfiber Mop for Hard-Surface Floors & the Hardwood Floor Cleaner to keep our flooring beautiful and preserve it for years to come.

We first started using Bona® when we moved into our first apartment in Chicago in 2015. Bona® Hardwood Floor Cleaner has an effective formula that completely cleans your floors by removing dust, dirt and grime. The cleaning solution holds a Greenguard Gold certification, making it safe for use in your home and around your family. By using Bona®‘s Hardwood Floor Cleaner I don’t have to worry about damaging the finish of my floors by incorrectly making a DIY solution I’m unsure about. It’s also safe for all unwaxed, polyurethane finished wood floors and it dries fast without a dulling residue. (By the way, while the Hardwood Floor Cleaner is safe for hardwood floors, it is not meant to be used on other types of floors, obviously.)

Keeping my hardwood floors clean and looking nice is definitely a priority because my two girls spend a lot of time on the floors. Our dog, Capone, sometimes brings in dirt after playing around outside with my 4-year-old and going on walks. In addition, my husband works in a labor intensive job at which he gets super dirty, too. Needless to say, there’s a lot going on with our floors! I make cleaning our hardwood floors with Bona® a part of my weekly cleaning routine, which I like to do on weekends (or when the girls are in bed if I can’t get to them on Sundays). Our floors have looked shiny and clean after each round with the Bona® Microfiber Mop.

I’ve learned a thing or two about how to clean hardwood floors effectively. We made the mistake of using a steam cleaner in the past, which we didn’t know can lead to cupping, damage, and then creaky, uneven floors! Now we know the Bona® Microfiber Mop is the way to go.