Welcome to the chronicles of a bi-racial Canadian. This blog is dedicated to the celebration of my being thin and Brown. My family is White but I turned out Taupe. I’m not sure how this happened but what I am sure of is that the stories that have come out of this predicament have a tendency to provoke tremendous laughter. I invite you to join me in laughing at myself and all the many things in this world that are ridiculous (Mariah Carey, I’m talking to you). Sit back and enjoy; Brown and Thin!

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Mother Superior

It's amazing how as you grow up there is so much role reversal. I remember Princess Toadstool (my Mother) reading a story to me about a Mother and her Son. She would rock her little baby son until he was asleep. The story continued the journey of the little boy's life growing up and moving away from the home. The story concludes with the Mother growing elderly and her son instead rocking her in a chair in his arms. I recall this among many stories Princess Toadstool would read to me including many of the Dr. Suess variety. This one in particular is in the forefront of my mind today because I find myself beginning to role reverse myself.

As a kid, Mother's Day is usually planned by the Mother herself. She usually orchestrates some sort of activity to spend with her children while the Father will secretly take the kids out a few days prior to pick out a card or a small present. My involvement in Mother's Day as a kid was really more about following instructions than taking any initiative. I find myself today, at 24 years old, taking a much different perspective. Today is the day that I must now take initiative and show my love for the person who endured several hours of labor to give birth to a bi-racial Canadian. I'm not sure if I would have made the same sacrifice. I was crying profusely at the dentist's office and it was only a consultation. Mothers truly are amazing.

Princess Toadstool always had this very strange habit of doing the dishes in the dark. I'm not sure why she did this but on several occasions I witnessed this oddity. One time she cut herself with a knife that was submerged in the water. I now find myself occasionally doing the same thing. My roommate thinks I've lost my mind but for some reason I feel comfort in participating in this activity, always remembering to remove all sharp objects beforehand. In a strange way I am paying tribute to the woman who taught me how to make Shake 'n Bake. It's my way of giving thanks to the person who explained to me why it's best to not go number 2 in a public park. If it weren't for her I probably would still be copping a squat under a neighborhood slide right here in Texas. I have so many good memories of Princess Toadstool and it is today that I must honor my Mother.

Not only is it important as an adult to take initiative to pay homage and acknowledge the sacrifices and celebration of your Mother. It is also important to to acknowledge (and most certainly remember) all of the other Mother's in your family! First of all there's my Grandmother who we will refer to as Celine. For much of my life I lived with Celine, Princess Toadstool, Barbie (my Sister), Luigi (my Step Dad), and Harry Potter (my Brother). Celine was a wonderful Grandmother but not typical of sorts. She was not the kind of woman who sat in a rocker or wheeled herself around slowly on any kind of motorized vehicle. She went to work everyday and could cut you with a backhanded commented faster than you could say Quebec. Celine, as the nickname denotes, is French Canadian. She refuses to be referred to as Grandma, we must call her Nana. She is NOT Jewish. She just feels that "Nana" has less of an elderly stigma attached to it. She constantly makes fun of her boyfriend (of over 20 years) and makes special comment on his gigantic nose. He is from Saskatchewan which has a very "Children of the Corn" feeling. Celine LOVES Canasta, Bingo, and Yahtzee! It's like crack cocaine for this woman. I am right behind her! I've already started watching Law & Order marathons. Clearly I am turning into my Grandmother, and fast!

The next mother of mention is my Sister, Barbie. How quickly I forget that she is a Mother too! Barbie has an adorable little daughter who we will call Barbie². This little girl is the absolute vision of my Sister as a kid. I remember very clearly watching Barbie brush her incredibly long blond hair in the mirror with adorable beady little eyes and bright smile. This memory has come flooding back as I've witnessed her daughter's facebook growth. Barbie² is a dancer and ultimate performer. When I saw her last summer she was very excited to show me every move she had possibly learned! I have no idea where she gets any of this from. When we were kids, Barbie was the person who taught me how to do the Roger Rabbit and the Running Man. I still break these moves out when I've had too much tequila. They really are a hit in the Black night clubs of Texas. It's also very strange to note that Barbie and I are both turning into Betty Crocker at the same time. She is 4 years older than I which means that Barbie is a little further along the track. I just started making my own pie crusts but she has her own vegetable garden with gigantic cucumbers! At least I have an example of what is yet to come for me. Apparently we are both turning into Julia Child at an accelerated pace.

These three women have ultimately helped to shape my life in many ways. I am slowly turning into all three of them. Princess Toadstool, Celine, and Barbie possess many of the traits that are slowly brewing inside of me. As I find myself doing dishes in the dark, busting out the Running Man or making fun of people's noses, I realize that this is all merely a reflection of my lineage. It's Jesus's way of reminding me of where I came from. So today, I must send out my love three ways! For my Mother, my Sister, and to Nana, I love you all very much! I hope you have many pancakes with smiley faces on them today! I will be FedEx-ing some Aunt Jemima syrup over shortly.