The 15 Worst Local Band Names

Inputting hundreds of music listings per week to be featured online and in print in the Observer, I see the occasional band name so bad I question my existence on this earth. Some are funny. Some are vile. Some are embarrassing.

In fact, the idea of having a band name is kind of stupid. You don't round up three or four friends and say, "Whenever we get together, let's call ourselves Space Explosion." Or if you do, you certainly don't expect others to take you seriously.

Nevertheless, some bands (a rare few) do come up with a good, workable band name. The following, however, is a list of some of the worst ones I've seen in recent months.

Poo Live CrewEvery time I see this band listed in some Fort Worth dive's music calendar, I laugh a little.

3The only reason this band is on the list is because of how un-Googleable their name is. How do they expect anyone to find them on the web? See also: Adair's Wednesday night house band, Red.

Bone Doggie & The Hickory Street HellraisersThe problems with this band name are two-fold. Just having an ampersand in your band's name puts it dangerously close to being on this list, but when the number one guy in your band goes by Bone Doggie, you've got a level-red bad band name on your hands.

Vanilla Face JonesTrying to figure this one out. Is it racial commentary or does one of the band members have a face that tastes like vanilla? It might be a Borat reference that falls flat, especially considering that most of the trio's catalog consist of Beatles covers.

The entire Curtain Club calendarReaper Crew, Lotus Sutra, Psymatix, Noey and The Nastys, Decide Your Betrayal, Ligma, The Eighth Digit, Slow To The Cause: All bands playing at The Curtain Club in the next week. Almost forgot to include this gem: And Jesus Wept. Of all the Bible verses to misquote, they chose the shortest one.

Graceland NinjazAs far as cover bands go, the Ninjaz are actually really good, but not good enough to let a name like that slide.

Whiskey DickWhy anyone would want to be associated with such a disappointing occurrence is beyond me, but the burly Fort Worth duo own it.

Los TexManiacsIt started off well. They were on the right track for a few letters. What probably happened is one of the guys was obsessed with working the word "maniac" into the name.

Old SnackGreat band. Terrible name.

Fat By the GallonYou'd think this would be a jam band, but Fat By the Gallon perpetrate pretty forgettable pop punk under an unforgettably bad moniker.

Wo FatAnother in a long line of bands referencing Hawaii Five-0.

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