2011-2014. The original blog that got it all started. It represents reflections I had and sharing I did, during a time period in my life, freshly post autism diagnosis, worsening illness, though I wasn't yet clear on things. I was trying to process and going through a lot of hard learning. There's some good stuff in here, which helped others, and there's also some stuff that no longer reflects my situation and/or evolved insights. Please read with this in mind.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Entry 67: Parents, Stand Up

Unfortunately, mistreatment and trauma happens to most autistic
adults today, and children too. However, there's a hope to prevent it that lies
in parent's standing up for their child from the get go; and thus minimizing
the traumatic impact of these things. This makes for the kid having a better
chance, and a better self esteem, into adulthood.

This truly does start with parents standing up and saying No to
the systems that fail to protect us from misunderstanding that results in
trauma. I really hope that staunchly opening up to autistic kids' parents,
about the straight up facts coming from an autistic woman's point of view,
won't be seen as bold. I feel it's so important.

I only want to share with them what can happen to us if
we don't take action early now. I say "we" because; not only am
I autistic and remember what it was like for me as a kid; but I also have an 8-year-old
autistic son. I am currently being persecuted and even at one point, accused of
acting in an “un-cooperative” way, because I know my son is afflicted, as
autistics are in the environment of today.

So, in lieu of this, autie kids' parents; I won't say standing
up for your child, and opposing the systems' idea of what’s good for them, when
you see that it is not, will be easy. In the process, you may be judged,
scapegoated, blamed, ostracized. You may then experience a taste of what your
au child is prone to, just because they are au, and what is only likely to
worse for them into adulthood.

I don't know about you; but this would only fuel my passion to
do everything I can to make it one day stop. In the mean time, setting this
kind of example for your child helps prepare them, boost their confidence and
thus boost their immunity for what may, to some degree, be inevitable.

Yes, I have been ostracized, at times, for making my own
individual, apparently "radical" choices for myself, and my children’s’
health and well being. I choose to give my sons holy basil herbal tea for calm,
homeopathic, and herbal remedies approved by student herbalists. I choose to
feed them gluten and dairy free diet without processed and fortified foods (we
get the vitamins from super foods themselves, no need for fortification!)

I choose to go out of my way to avoid Genetically Modified Foods
at all costs in which are getting increasingly easier. Knowing what I know,
it's hard not to. I am a science woman too, and the facts about all of the
former (especially GMO's) are not only cringe worthy, but particularly profound
in effect, for autistic people. In lieu of this, I ride with my wholehearted
beliefs, out of love for me children. This apparently makes me a
"radical."

However, I have fought a lot to stand up for myself, and in lieu
of this more clinicians I have worked with have seemingly seen the light. They
know I mean business because I stand in my truth/ They know not to take the
things written at face value, or be implicated as liable when I am finished
with proving their absolute falsehood. See, this is standing up strong. I have
no choice, as this extends to my family. It otherwise affects them too.

See, when I say these personal lifestyle choices work for my
kids, and for myself (better than drug treatments); it is my human right and
choice as a mother and as a human being. This does not makes me
"disordered" and accusing me of such violates my human rights.

I can’t have this be, I can’t accept this type of abuse, and I
will not stop making that clear. I have barely been able to even as much as
open my mouth, in order to express any concerns for myself, or my children, without
being seen in a negative light.

This is by clinicians who do not know me very well, and are
simply taking one subjectively cruel judgment about me, at blunt face value. I
consider this to be inappropriate and structurally violent. It is when it
happens to any parent of any autistic child. It will be, eventually, dealt
with, when I am ready for it. This isn't okay for my kids more than anything,
so again; I stand up strong.

As one can see, I know persecution. It's because of my
own autism and how I present, that I've been seen like this by the cynical,
ignorant and un-evolved "professionals"...whom are
"professional" enough to do a lot of damage if they feel so inclined.
However, many of these “professionals” continue to take no responsibility for
their erroneous and incredibly harmful actions. They most often do not stop
until they are proven wrong so powerfully that they are overcome.

This is how snuffing out wrongful, potentially sociopathic
societal behavior works. It's only by standing strong, until numbers and
strength grow. There is no other way, with entities so feeling less and devoid
in compassionate humanitarianism. It is possible to stand up to these
behemoths. Let's take a look when the tobacco companies were successfully sued.
Let’s take a look at how the corporations are beginning to respond to the
opposition of GMO foods.

They are beginning to own up a bit more, by labeling their foods
"Non GMO verified." See, otherwise, people don't give them business
in not. See, it is possible. The customer, the client, the consumer, the
patient, truly does have the more power than they think. We can stop giving away
our power, and stand strong. We don't need to be afraid, subservient, and
obedient. We especially can protect out children: we have a choice.

Autistic or not we can stand up; even in the face of what
initial backlash may occur. Obviously, when you stand up to a beast; it may
roar and thrash back. We can get through this part, and starve it out with our
unwavering faith and love. It's our choice how we choose to optimize
the functionality of our kids, and ourselves for that
matter...so we can function as parents. If we don't, what has
happened to so many failed kids who are neuro divergent, so tragically, will
only continue to be. Our kids deserve a quality chance at life!

Currently, therapies are often less then effective and/or
extorted in price. Greed and dollar signs have encompassed the world of autism
therapies. It's not fair to any of us. Then, when we try to help ourselves, we
can get attacked. When we don't adhere to what they say is the right way, we
are persecuted.

I find it all to be terribly arbitrary. To even as much as
passive aggressively dictate that only a certain way is the right way, feels so
wrong. To deny all the rest albeit proof that different and alternative things
may work for people, just isn't ok. This seems rather totalitarian to me, but
in whispers. This is what modern society has become, and it's gone too far.

However, and in retrospect, I'm not the only one trying to
change this in action. Thank god for the Internet. It's so important to be able
to share stories amongst each other, and find answers unsaid.

Let's hope the more we speak out, the more society will evolve.
That is why we must, and again, it starts with the parents. Be open to becoming
the best advocate and activist you can be for your child. It will save your
child a lot of potential grief in their future. Believe me, I know this one
firsthand.

Nobody stood up for me, as a child, as they should have. Nobody
was really aware of how to or for what. I carry those battle scars, and spend
much of my time attempting to heal them and manage the damage caused. I
wouldn’t wish those experiences on anyone. We can prevent it from happening to
our own kids, even if it happened to us.