Before having a meaningful conversation about intimacy, the term must be clearly defined since misunderstandings about this word plague our culture. True intimacy can be emotional, spiritual, or physical, but rarely sexual. When talking about intimacy, we are always deliberate to differentiate it from sex, since sex in our culture usually comes from an indulgently selfish motive that seeks to answer "What’s in it for me?" True intimacy seeks to answer entirely different questions: "How can I know you better?," "How can I meet your needs?," and "What can I do for you?"…

Tami and I recently taught a marriage seminar on the false assumptions that we all bring into our marriages. We went on to point out that if we could clear away some of these false assumptions about marriage, it would likely pave the way for better marriages or possibly even truly great marriages. Wives, you should not assume that your husband will always be your best friend by virtue of the fact that you are his wife. There, we have said it out loud. Women tend to think that since they started as best friends with the one…

We have the privilege of having many great friends at a variety of solid churches around Southern California. This give us the opportunity to learn, grow, and share with many different people. We recently visited Sanctuary Church in Calimesa while they were doing a teaching series called, "Real Relationships." The particular week that we were there, the focus was on marriage relationships…

Do you know that sinking feeling you get the very minute you realize that you messed up? That moment when you said something you regret and it's seconds too late to stop it from coming out of your mouth? That instant when you did something that you can't undo? That realization that you're going to have to eat some humble pie again We all do. This is the place where regret is born. You should never live with regret… especially if you don't have to. Regret could be summed up as that inner turmoil that threatens to consume every day of your life until you stare it down, size it up, and put it to rest once and for all…

According to John Gottman, psychology professor and noted relationship expert, couples who are not stressed can overcome negativity in a relationship, but couples who are stressed rarely do. The cycle spins out of control in what Gottman calls, "reciprocated negativity" and starts to eat away at the emotional ties that have been holding the relationship together much in the same way that a strong acid would erode a hefty rope. While this cycle can be stopped and even turned around, preventing it from happening in the first place could spare couples (and their families) untold heartache and emotional wounds…

Before having a meaningful conversation about intimacy, the term must be clearly defined since misunderstandings about this word plague our culture. True intimacy can be emotional, spiritual, or physical, but rarely sexual. When talking about intimacy, we are always deliberate to differentiate it from sex, since sex in our culture usually comes from an indulgently selfish motive that seeks to answer "What’s in it for me?" True intimacy seeks to answer entirely different questions: "How can I know you better?," "How can I meet your needs?," and "What can I do for you?"…

Tami and I recently taught a marriage seminar on the false assumptions that we all bring into our marriages. We went on to point out that if we could clear away some of these false assumptions about marriage, it would likely pave the way for better marriages or possibly even truly great marriages. Wives, you should not assume that your husband will always be your best friend by virtue of the fact that you are his wife. There, we have said it out loud. Women tend to think that since they started as best friends with the one…

We have the privilege of having many great friends at a variety of solid churches around Southern California. This give us the opportunity to learn, grow, and share with many different people. We recently visited Sanctuary Church in Calimesa while they were doing a teaching series called, "Real Relationships." The particular week that we were there, the focus was on marriage relationships…

Do you know that sinking feeling you get the very minute you realize that you messed up? That moment when you said something you regret and it's seconds too late to stop it from coming out of your mouth? That instant when you did something that you can't undo? That realization that you're going to have to eat some humble pie again We all do. This is the place where regret is born. You should never live with regret… especially if you don't have to. Regret could be summed up as that inner turmoil that threatens to consume every day of your life until you stare it down, size it up, and put it to rest once and for all…

According to John Gottman, psychology professor and noted relationship expert, couples who are not stressed can overcome negativity in a relationship, but couples who are stressed rarely do. The cycle spins out of control in what Gottman calls, "reciprocated negativity" and starts to eat away at the emotional ties that have been holding the relationship together much in the same way that a strong acid would erode a hefty rope. While this cycle can be stopped and even turned around, preventing it from happening in the first place could spare couples (and their families) untold heartache and emotional wounds…