An Error of Omission

This is not a post about music. This is a post about love. And this is long overdue.

Some recent conversations with a friend have had me thinking a lot about words. I’ve been obsessing over them, in fact. I think words have power woven into them. They can uplift the weak and break down the strong. They can comfort and they can unsettle. Even how you talk about things inside of your own brain is powerful. This varying internal monologue of your perspective adds up to a general feeling of the worth of something which greatly affects your decision making, attitude, and contentment about said thing.

What’s even more powerful than this internal monologue is when you speak words into the air, giving them their force. The words you speak build the walls which line the corridors of your future path. If you have gotten bad service as at a restaurant you might find yourself flippantly say to your friend, “All of these people who work at this place are idiots.” This hyperbole has a way of germinating inside of your brain and if you don’t take deliberate action against it, it often has a way of flowering into prejudice. Your expectations then change and they tend to filter and tint your experience similarly to how certain news networks have political bias. You often create bias in a seemingly innocent ways. An off-hand comment here or there may just create a full-fledged hatred for something without you even realizing it.

Obviously, there is a side to this which often carries with it beautiful consequences. Both the internal and external projections of words can be completely positive:

“I love my job.”

“I appreciate how hard my parents worked to give me as great of a life as they could.”

“Thank you.”

“I don’t mind rainy days because sometimes it’s just nice to have a rainy day.”

You get what I’m saying, I think.

There is a statement just like this that I’ve been putting off saying publicly because there are people very close to me who disagree strongly with it. It goes against a lot of the things I’ve learned growing up, and yet I couldn’t be more sure in my heart that it is right. I have wronged a lot of great people by not saying this sooner as I have dear friends who I have failed to support publicly. I hope that you all can forgive my absence in the conversation. I am here now though.

I believe that gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, transgendered, queer, etc people deserve every single ounce of human dignity that is afforded to anyone else. I believe everyone should have the right to marry whoever they want. I believe LGBTQ marriages should have every single benefit and problem that straight marriages have. I believe everyone should be able to choose how they define their gender. I believe that everyone should have the opportunity to love who they are. I believe that everyone deserves to be loved as who they are, who they were, and who they will be in the future. I also believe that this is common sense.

Some of you might even be rolling your eyes right now because this idea is so basic and fundamental to being a human that it almost seems silly to talk about it. It almost seems silly, but it’s not. It will always be an imperative for us as humans to express our deepest values. Should you even care that I’m writing this? Not really. I’m a white, middle class male living in the most privileged country in the world. Every aspect of my life is a blessing of luxury in most of the world’s eyes. My opinion on any matter is not very important. But what is important are words, and saying them out loud. So, that is why I am writing this: for myself first and also to add my voice to the millions who have already spoken out.