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July 11, 2014

That Time We Stopped Making Fun of Each Other

A few months ago my husband and I made the decision to stop making fun of each other. It was such a simple thing, but it was so difficult to remember and to put into action. We would call each other on it as soon as the other person would say something hurtful, and we would immediately apologise, but it was a good test for us as a couple -- as well as individuals -- and as the time went on it became easier to say things positive to each other, or to bite our tongues when we had something cruel to say. Practice makes perfect, as the adage goes. Although we will never get enough practice to be perfect; cruel words slip through our teeth still, but I find that we are a lot happier than we have been in a long time because we are trying to be good to each other and not put each other down.

I found our experiment to be quite interesting after reading an article that was shared on a friend's Facebook page. It talked about how relationships that last a long time -- that are happy relationships, not just miserable people sticking it out together -- are based on kindness and generosity. There are a couple of experiments that were conducted to find out why some relationships thrive while others do not.

What really caught my attention from the study was the part where it talks about any situation a couple might be in where one person is really excited about something, and depending on how his/her partner reacts to that excitement will determine the happiness of the relationship. Is the partner going to shrug it off, or are they going to be really excited with them? It's pretty obvious which reaction is going to help the relationship stay together and stay happy, and that's what made me think of our experiment where we stopped making fun of each other. Kindness goes a long way.