Monday, November 29, 2010

A very prestigious cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for most of his life... A huge heart... covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

At that point, one of the mourners just -burst- into laughter. When all eyes stared at him.

Friday, November 26, 2010

“How come you’re late?” asked the bartender, as the blonde waitress walked into the bar.

“It was awful,” she explained. “I was walking down Elm street and there was a terrible accident. A man was thrown from his car and he was lying in the middle of the street. His leg was broken, his skull was fractured, and there was blood everywhere. Thank God I took that first-aid course.”

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.
It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.
Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. Melody Beattie

Friday, November 19, 2010

Just in case you are having a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological journals. The funny thing is that it really does work and will make you smile.

Picture yourself lying on your tummy on a warm rock that hangs out over a crystal clear stream.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Grandma and Grandpa were sitting in their porch rockers watching the beautiful sunset and reminiscing about "the good old days". Grandma turned to Grandpa and said, "Honey, do you remember when we first started dating and you used to just casually reach over and take my hand?"

Thursday, November 11, 2010

We have enjoyed the redneck jokes for years. It's time to take a reflective look at the core beliefs of a culture that values home, family, country and God. If I had to stand before a dozen terrorists who threaten my life, I'd choose a half dozen or so rednecks to back me up. Tire irons, squirrel guns and grit -- that's what rednecks are made of. I hope I am one of those. If you feel the same, pass this on to your redneck friends. Y'all know who ya are!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Three Pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said "Ya know, since summer started I've been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I've tried everything--noise, spray, cats--nothing seems to scare them away.

Another said "Yea, me too. I've got hundreds living in my belfry and in the narthex attic. I've even had the place fumigated, and they won't go away."

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

In 1951. The world was a different place. A friend sent me the link at the very bottom of this post, so if you want to know some of the things that happened the year you were born then give it a go. Thanks Dr. Vern B.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Murphy applied for a fork lift operator post at a famous Irish firm based in Dublin. A Norwegian applied for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications, they were asked to take a test and led to a quiet room with no interruptions by the Manager.

Friday, November 5, 2010

You can make a difference to some lonely G.I. overseas. Please help. It won’t cost you anything but a few minutes of your time.

Free Phone Calls & Internet for Deployed Troops are causes led by JoeOnTheMove to provide comfort and increase moral of U.S. troops deployed overseas. This helps to ease the worry & fear of families & loved ones here in the United States. Currently there are over 200,000 U.S. Service-Members deployed & fighting in countries around the world. Suicide & divorce within military families are at an all time high.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

In mathematics and computer science, graph theory is the study of graphs, which are mathematical structures used to model pairwise relations between objects. A "graph" in this context is made up of "vertices" or "nodes" and lines called edges that connect them. A graph may be undirected, meaning that there is no distinction between the two vertices associated with each edge, or its edges may be directed from one vertex to another; see graph (mathematics) for more detailed definitions and for other variations in the types of graph that are commonly considered. Graphs are one of the prime objects of study in discrete mathematics. Source: Wikipedia

Two very nice folks are having a birthday today. First there is my great buddy Empress Bee from Muffin53. She doesn't like a fuss, but she loves comments. She also loves cake and big cruise ships.

Second is Renny from RennyBA's Terella. Renny hails from Norway and travels a great deal. He also shares some of the yummiest food out there. He is very proud of his Norway and you can sense that in his posts.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

In mathematics and computer science, graph theory is the study of graphs, which are mathematical structures used to model pairwise relations between objects. A "graph" in this context is made up of "vertices" or "nodes" and lines called edges that connect them. A graph may be undirected, meaning that there is no distinction between the two vertices associated with each edge, or its edges may be directed from one vertex to another; see graph (mathematics) for more detailed definitions and for other variations in the types of graph that are commonly considered. Graphs are one of the prime objects of study in discrete mathematics. Source: Wikipedia