“Imago Relationship Therapy, the means for achieving a conscious relationship, facilitates the conscious mutual healing of childhood wounds between two partners. At its theoretical core is the idea that we pick our partners based on an unconscious image- called the Imago - of “the person who can make me whole.” This image is a composite of our caretakers, especially the negative traits that were most wounding to us, and of the original aspects of ourselves that got lost in the process of conforming to social expectations. We seek in our partnerships to re-create the context in which we were wounded, so that we can finish the business of our childhood. Thus we seek from someone like our caretakers what we didn’t get in childhood in order to heal old wounds, thereby restoring the joyful aliveness with which we came into the world.

But because this agenda is unconscious, and because we are carrying around the character defenses we’ve built up all our lives to protect ourselves against further pain, our wounds are reopened by our Imago partners because they are similar to our parents, and we react in the same old childish ways. In a conscious relationship, we recognize this unconscious agenda and make its completion our conscious intention.

The Imago process involves committing to understanding our own wounds and those of our partner, to learning new skills and changing our hurtful behavior, in the course of which we meet our partner’s needs and restore the lost and denied parts of ourselves, thus achieving spiritual wholeness.

Every relationship travels a predictable path from the bliss of romantic love to the nightmare of disillusionment and conflict. Yet every relationship, with the addition of conscious intentionality, has the potential to be a transformative journey toward spiritual growth and wholeness.”

By Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt who developed Imago Relationship Therapy

Oprah listed her show with Harville Hendrix and this way of working with couples as one of her Top 20 Shows throughout her 20 years of having her own show. This model changed her view of relationships. She also included an article, the Marriage Repair Kit, using the Imago model in her 2005 book, Live Your Best Life.

What Oprah Says

“What we are all striving for is authenticity, a spirit-to-spirit connection. That requires difficult emotional work. According to Harville Hendrix, PhD, one of the best marriage therapists in the country and author of Getting the Love You Want, most people are coupled with someone who brings up all their past issues. Dr. Hendrix explained it this way when he appeared on my show: "The purpose of marriage is to finish your childhood. And if you finish your childhood, you will live happily every after."

“What I know for Sure,” Oprah magazine, March 2002, page 216. Signed by Oprah Winfrey

And THIS is the therapy that Dr. Janet Greenwood provides for her clients!

“The commitment to do well and to be well is a lifetime of choices that you make daily.”
- Oprah Winfrey

Are you Getting the Love You Want?

Communication problems in relationships often erode the passion and hope that we first feel when we fall in love. Imago communications skills for families and couples will help you quickly revive that passion, and reconnect with your partner. Building trust in relationships is an important part of the Imago journey, so that you can feel safe enough to truly understand your partner, and once again appreciate them fully.

Much of Imago is based on connecting with your partner through a form of dialogue. After you speak, your partner mirrors what you said. It can be very uplifting just to experience your partner really taking in your words. The experience becomes richer as your partner lets you know that what you say makes sense, and shares with you their recognition of what you may be feeling.

You can learn these skills and many more from Dr. Janet Greenwood. These are based on the best-selling book “Getting the Love You Want” by Harville Hendrix, PhD, who developed Imago Relationship Therapy together with his wife Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD. Couples are taught why they were originally attracted to their partner, why that love can turn to conflict, and how to use the Imago dialogue to work on these issues together.

Janet Greenwood can help you make effective use of the Imago relationship skills which she teaches, with a strong emphasis placed on helping you and your partner connect through dialogue. Imago couples communication therapy includes some exceptionally effective approaches to mending relationships and rebuilding your marriage.

We think of Imago as a

“New Way to Love”

When we fall in love, it’s supposed to be forever. We meet the person of our dreams and a magical transformation takes place within us. We feel alive, whole, connected to the world and the people in it. Then before we know it, that magical connection disappears! Where did it go?

Imago Relationship Theory teaches that romantic love, which you experience at the beginning of your relationship, is the way our unconscious seeks to restore the feeling of joyful aliveness we felt as a young child. We’re attracted to people who emotionally resemble our primary caretakers, because we unknowingly believe they can provide these emotional needs. We call this “finding our Imago match”. Imago is the Latin word for image, the subconscious image of our perfect partner.

However when we choose a partner who is our “Imago match” they resemble both the positive AND the negative qualities of our primary caretakers. It’s these negative qualities that create confusion and disillusionment when we realize that they are not able to meet our deepest emotional needs.

How Imago helps you rediscover the relationship of your dreams

Imago Relationship Therapy will help you become aware of the hidden agenda of romantic love, and to see that the conflict in your relationship is a wonderful opportunity for growth. The Imago dialogue provides a safe and supportive set of tools to explore these deep issues with your partner. The emotional bond initially created by romantic love is able to evolve into the powerful, lifelong bond that is real love.

Imago provides you with some simple tools which help you rediscover the relationship of your dreams!