most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.

Wednesday, January 08, 2014

early Valentine

hi there

well, what can i say, i am a romantic. i know Valentine's Day is about six or so weeks away, but i saw the perfect gift for my (considerably) better half and was not prepared to wait until the day to let her, as it were, have it.

was this early Valentine's gift welcome? have a look and see for yourself.

i think that's a yes.

not much in this world screams romance and love quite as much as a strategically coloured ironing board, i am pretty certain you will agree. this probably outdoes my excellent Valentine's Day card from last year, the details of which you can find by clicking here if you are interested. which you are.

i would like it reflected on record that i will resent and defend myself any allegations that imply this ironing board was simply bought as it was the cheapest i could find and we needed one. but not, you will observe, dignify such allegations with a flat denial, as legally that might be an act of folly.

oh yes, that is it indeed in the magnificence of Commodore 64 mode. what Apple spent moments destroying on my iTwat took me mere hours to fix and mend. i trust you appreciate the effort i have gone to in order to ensure that Commodore 64 images appeared here. the iTwat was very close to tasting the blade of a saw, or having its flammable capabilities tested.

how happy was my (considerably) better half with this gift? impressed at first, for sure, and then burst into tears of presumably joy when i explained that this was in fact her Valentine's gift that i was letting her have early, and it was also a bit of her birthday present too.

there, look at that happiness in her eyes as she gets ready to use this. how could i, not wanting creased pants, have withheld this gift until Feb 14th? i particularly like how she is in no way looking at me whilst holding the iron in her hand in a way that suggests she would like to twat me one with it.

i appreciate that, in doing this, i have set the standard at a higher bar for all other men. the gents of the world will have to do much to equal the generosity of my love when it comes to their better halves, to whichever level they are considered to be considerably that. sorry chaps.

oh look, it has stripes too. i didn't notice that, just the pink and purple bits that looked like they were Valentine-ish and had nothing at all to do with the fact that it was the only such ironing board in stock.

much of the actual gift of this was that i carried this, 10kg of the finest coal known to man and some milk over some distance back from the shops to our home. if someone took a picture of my labours and toils in doing this and has uploaded it to some sort of social network thing, that would be ace. it was, i agree, a perfect opportunity for a selfie, but my hands were full of coal, ironing board and milk. and, now that i think, pizza.

here you go, a final picture for now, one of my (considerably) better half lavishing her affection and indeed appreciation on her Valentine's Day gift.

she has suggested that the board will probably see more affection from her than i will as a consequence of it being a Valentine's gift, which just goes to show how much she loves it.