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Mr Bump.
Recently I have been really accident prone, I'm starting to fear for the safety of my life now.
I just slipped on some ice in town and whacked my head on the pavement - it was really embarrassing.
I've almost got through a whole toilet roll of paper in order to stem the flow of blood. It will stop right?

...always loses everything and has a mild panic attack but by the end of the book everything is ok because her friends help her find the missing stuff and there is some sort of moral about 'more haste less speed'.