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Certainly, it’s true that if you Google the term “interracial” in Google Images, most images will be of black men and white women; and I think part of this is simply because most interracial relationships are between black men and white women. Another part of this seeming puzzle, is that Ralph Richard Banks (author of the much-piloried bestseller “Is Marriage for White People?”) is correct in his reasoning that interracial relationships between black women and white men simply are not occurring at any kind of statistical significance. Statistically, black women are “sitting shiva,” while their mirror opposite in the dating realm takes the lead role in real life, mass media, and apparently public perception.

This piece from BlackYouthProject.com suggests that part of the reason public perception toward interracial relationships (more prominently romantic ones) focus on black men and white women is that mass media depicts images of black men that are positive and upbeat while images of black women in mass media are mostly negative or denigrating.

While it’s encouraging to see black women kicking butt in films such as “Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol” and the upcoming James Bond flick (where Ms. Moneypennybecome a gun-toting sista who can hold her own with 007), it’s also true that positive and uplifting imagery of black wome

Image via Wikipedia.

n in mass media dwarf compared to those of black males. So, yeah, I agree with their point, but feel that it’s also just the tip of the proverbial ice-berg.

Hopefully, you picked up on the slight tinge of sarcasm in my title there.

Look, although I’m a “white” man, I grew up surrounded by wonderful black people; including a biracial granny, a black best friend; the works. Never dated a white woman in my life, proudly married to a beautiful and intelligent and funny black woman.

But it does seem easier for black men to approach and date white women than it does for black women to even consider dating a non-black man, even after the “Is Marriage for White People?” book was released and soared to the top of most book sales lists. Some of this may be attributed just to the fact that it’s more socially acceptable (if not rewarded) for men of any ethnicity to be more assertive, aggressive, and “go getters” especially when it comes to dating and perceived “conquest.”

Amongst men, men period, a male who dates often and regularly is considered cool or admirable. A woman who dates often and regularly is not always seen in so positive a light. Certainly, there’s a dating double-standard going on.

There’s also tremendous, soul-crushing racial bias and discrimination at play throughout America to the point that I’d say racism is as American as apple pie and Uncle Sam and the whole Thanksgiving mythology. Men who are told it’s okay to be “go getters” are going to have an easier time “skiing the slopes” or adding “creme to the coffee” or whatever other metaphor you want to come up with than women who are not permitted to be as assertive.

Then you ad to that, the fact that black women are perceived to “owe” an allegiance to the perpetuation and continuation of the black “race” as a whole that their male counterparts do not have to swear to, and you’ve got some serious pressure.

If I look up “interracial couple” in Google images, I find mostly photos of black men with white women. There are not as many images of black women with white men on the whole. Google is a pretty popular search engine these days, so it’s a fair guess this image search would come up similarly if repeated in Yahoo or Bing. What’s my point? That “interracial dating” or “interracial couple” is largely a black man/white woman norm. And black women are either “sitting shiva,” dating with little statistical chance of marriage much less commitment (this ain’t just my observation but borne out over and over again through one news piece after another), or just living their lives.

The ABC television program, “What Would You Do?” brought up the potentially inflammatory issues of interracial adoption on a past program (which I think is a component of ABC’s “Dateline” or “Nightline” programs), and the reactions of members of the general public are interesting-largely due to their supportive nature.

Here is part one, from YouTube, followed by part two, and then the third video is of a family that actually had to endure the reactions of racists and ignorant folks uncomfortable seeing bi-racial families.

What are your takes on the reactions of the public? Have you had similar experiences, worse, or better? Your shared experiences may help others grow.

Anyway, here’s the link/video to part one, then part two, and then the third one based on a “real” bi-racial family:

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