YSaC, Vol. 1773: Technical Foul

We’ve had plenty of posts from people looking to get something for nothing. It’s sort of a cliche that musicians get asked to play “for the exposure,” which as far as I can tell means that since they’re not getting paid, they’re likely to die of exposure.

Here’s someone looking for a free photographer, although what they really seem to need is someone with a few extra periods and commas:

Let’s create some art

Hey everyone I’m Jimmy 21 year old male model for the past year I’ve been lucky enough to work with some amazing photographers allot of which I’ve met on CL so recently I’ve been slacking and I have not been producing new work so let’s fix that I have a few girl friends who have been asking me to shoot with them I’m looking for photographers who willing to shoot edgy provocative semi-nude work I’ve done full nude but I’m not too sure if the girls are willing to do nudes I’m sure some of them are all of these shoot would be individual maybe a group I have a few idea and we are also ready to help you execute any of your ideas this is a TF so no money would be made from these pictures let me know if you’re interested and I’ll send you pics of myself and of some of the girls thanks

This is a TF. What is a TF, you ask? I have no idea. I tried looking it up, and here’s the first two dozen or so matches:

Transformers (toy)

Transformation

Track & Field

Transferrin

Transmission Fluid (automotive)

Transflash Memory Card (mobile device)

Tooth Fairy

Turbofan

Trotteur Francais (France)

True Friends

Trap Flag

Too Funny

Trigger Finger (stenosing tendovaginitis)

Tuition Fee

Two Fluid

Testicular Feminization (reproductive pathology)

Trace Flag

Transmission Factor (radiation exposure)

Transit Facility

Tranche Ferme (Marchés Publics)

Terminal File

Transient Fault

Terminal Forecast

Type of Funds (USACE)

Thomas-Fermi Approximation

None of these make any sense, of course, but I really hope it’s not the Tooth Fairy. Thanks for the post, Mike!

Hey everyone I’m Jimmy 21 year old male model for the past year I’ve been lucky enough to work with some amazing photographers allot of which I’ve met on CL

I don’t think fate has allotted Jimmy much success so far as a model. In fact, I think his career is currently the modeling equivalent of playing in local restaurants for the exposure, although he’s certainly willing to be exposed.

If you and the girls will meet my production team at the corner of Sleezie Lane and Skeezy Avenue, they will whisk you to my posh studio in glamorous Methherocokeland (please ignore the vagrants, for some reason we do seem to have more than our share), where I will capture your essence, on video and print.

At first, I was thinking to diagram this, er, “sentence.” Nut, I realized there is neither paper nor stylesheet quite long enough. To then be flummoxed by “TF.”

I’m quite certain Spark’ did not mean Task Force by context (although, Spark’ would probably be up for entertaining a thousand sailors–as long as they are buying).

I’m pretty sure Spark’ does not mean “Trust Fund” (unless someone wants to support him using theirs).

I’d wager TF is meant to equal “trade for”–but the implications there are to sudderingly squicky, and it’s been a long week with really bad commutes, and I have no tears left for, for want of a better term, “humanity.” (The Dugong, Hugh, is getting short shrift as well.)

Ooo, I know this one. “Time for prints” is a way of describing a situation where photographers and models both work for free — the model’s time is donated in exchange for free prints. TF likely means “Time for [prints, files, etc]”. It’s a real thing.

On the other hand, anyone advertising for “edgy” nude or semi-nude photography on CL is by definition skeezy as hell, so it’s probably “Time for sexual favors” in this case. Which … is sometimes also a real thing, though not a legit thing.

Jimmy wants to get naked. Jimmy likes to be naked. Jimmy wants girls to see him naked. Jimmy’s about to be arrested for indecent exposures. Jimmy needs a lawyer. Jimmy’s up the river and never wants to be naked again. Jimmy’s got a pretty mouth. Jimmy has a new boyfriend.

Yes Sparky, this is a Total Fantasy. The girls you say they want to shoot with you don’t exist. In fact, the girl in the last post said she didn’t want any photos. So just kick back and keep on fantasizing because the only thing you got is your weekend of fame on YSac.

p.s. I’m all out of butter and carpet, so that isn’t an option either.