‘RHOOC’: Tamra Barney Almost Annihilates Alexis Bellino at Her Party

Tamra Barney, left, throws Alexis Bellino out of her party (Photo: Bravo)

With all of the red roses and dim red lighting, Tamra was going for elegance at the christening of her soon-to-be opened gym on Monday night’s episode of “The Real Housewives of Orange County.” But by the end of the event, all of the red just reminded us of hell — or blood about to be spilled — thanks to unwanted guest Alexis showing up with Vicki, along with new girl Lydia, who totally reminded us of Kristen Wiig’s “SNL” character Gilly. (If you don’t remember Gilly, you should click on the link. It’s, like, ridiculously accurate).

Anyway, here’s a quick recap of the drama that almost made Tamra turn Alexis into roadkill:

When the Trifecta of Dismay shows up at the party, Tamra hardly hides her seething bitterness at allowing them all to come, but it’s her small way of trying to make up with Vicki (and her new gelatinous chin).

But the social awkwardness at the party brings chills and makes hairs stand in places down south we cannot speak of, and that’s despite toothy new girl Lydia’s attempt at complimenting her way into the divided group.

When the ladies sit down for dinner, Tamra quickly gets down to business.

“Why are you here?” she asks Alexis. “Your husband wanted to sue me.”

But Alexis already has her speech ready: “Tamra…we don’t need to do this and ruin your party. I’m not going to be ganged up again. Stop with the bullying…”

Oh the B-word. Heather chokes on air and laughs in disbelief. She puts her hand up, as if blocking Alexis out, and in turn, Alexis starts pointing her finger at her smarter compadre.

“This is a night that I wanted to be here with my closest friends, so I think I’m really gracious to let you step foot in here tonight,” Tamra warns Alexis.

Alexis, trying her best to look like a supportive, upright friend, claims she came to encourage Vicki. But Gretchen isn’t hearing any of it and calls Alexis’ B.S. by reminding her she had rallied the ladies a few seasons back to bully Vicki.

As the squawking comes to a fever pitch, Heather and Alexis get back into it when Heather exclaims that Alexis quite simply has a dysfunctional relationship with the truth. Tamra jumps in and supports her brunette bud.

“Butt out?! You get the f*ck out!” Tamra spews out to ‘Jesus Jugs.’ “You get ouuut!!!”

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The angry blonde charges toward Alexis and jerks her chair out, almost from under her. Keeping Tamra at a distance, so that she doesn’t tear into her like a T-bone steak, Alexis walks away but tries to preserve her pride by badmouthing her the entire time she walks to her limo.

Furious that her party was infected with bad juju, Tamra isn’t finished screaming, and this time, she takes her anger out on Vicki. “Sorry, Vicki, you can choose your side right now! If you want to side with her, you get the f*ck out, too! Done!” she screams as she throws her arms into the air like an airplane and her bingo wings (i.e. the fatty jiggles on your arms) flap around with rage.