Stumbling Through The Adventures And Misadventures Of Dating With God's Grace

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There have been some changes going on in my life lately that I haven’t really known what to do with. Things I’m not yet ready to discuss and some things that I still have yet to work out. But God is doing a work in me. It has become ever more present this year and even more recently as I let go and let God take control of my life and the path that I have been holding onto so tightly.

The more I think I know what’s best for me the more I am shown I do not. God’s plan for me is so much better than my own. Every aspect of my life is on the verge of being turned upside down. And yah know what? I’m okay with that. I am going to embrace it.

I have so much to offer life and I haven’t been giving it or God my all. I don’t want to fall short anymore. There are plenty of times in my life I’ve failed, and from that failure I’ve learned and grown and moved forward. And there will be plenty more ahead of me but it’s not going to be for lack of trying.

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It’s Valentine’s Day! Don’t get your panties in a wad just because you might have the day to yourself. Celebrate it! You are not alone! More women than you think don’t have a date on this day, and it is not just because no one asked. Doesn’t mean you can’t have fun, need to stay at home watching sappy movies while eating chocolate and crying into your pillow. Get out there! Show yourself that you care about YOU.

Get a massage, go see a movie, hang with your girlfriends or whoever, stroll the downtown shops in your area or go a little farther and check out a new area. MOST importantly have fun, be good to yourself, and be kind to others! Its just another day in the week, in the month, in the year of your life. Don’t stress about it. You got this. Cause single is not just a status.

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You’re thinking what the heck am I talking about?! Why would someone want to do that? Am believe me I’m with yah! I don’t know how many times I have been told that when it comes to dating and finding the right person that maybe my standards need to be lowered. Supposedly it will WIDEN the dating pool. Honestly though, is that the kind of dating pool I want?

Nope.

I think over the years I have been willing to negotiate and compromise when it comes to dating. I have always had an open mind. Except for the one thing that I really want in my life. A rancher/farmer/cowboy. It’s the lifestyle I love and want to be in. So why would I go for something else? Why would I compromise my happiness for something that doesn’t make sense?

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I’ve gone through many years before this, my 32nd year, and each one it always seems as if I make commitments to myself that I don’t stick to. Not because they were meaningless but because I never fully put myself into them. I didn’t give those commitments the commitment they deserved. Tasking myself can sometimes be more difficult than tasking others. I’ve become good at putting things off by busying myself with other things that don’t pertain to me but others.

I know it doesn’t sound completely awful when you think about it. But for me? It is. For anyone like me, it is. Why? It means that we’re not taking care of ourselves. To be able to help others, you have to take care of yourself first. And that’s what I plan on doing this year.

I got a FitBit. A new devotional. And a plan.

It’s time to make this 32nd year of my life count for me. Not to depend on others to do it for me by waiting on it to come my way but by making it happen. To stop standing in my own way. There is going to be some major construction ahead and with the right tools, I think I’m going to be just fine.

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What does this mean? A bunch of resolutions going on. People all over the place are trying to start something new for the New Year. Will they stick to it? Who knows, but it’s not about the defeat or victory on whether or not the follow through happens and something good or bad comes out of it, it’s the journey. It’s the sticky in-between of everything and anything that can happen and making it through.

Change can’t happen without making a first step. Whatever that first step is, whether it’s a mistake or not, take it. Be the change you want to see.

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I did it. I made the call. Can’t believe that I actually made the call. And as I crossed my fingers and said a little prayer I got his voicemail. And left a message that I stumbled my way through. Cold, stuffed nose, and all I still left the message. Lord help me.

And now I wait…and try not to let my head get to filled with doubt in-between.