'My rear end is all over the place'

In a race where Kimi Raikkonen showed some rare emotion behind the wheel and Lewis Hamilton nearly went into full meltdown mode, ESPN brings you the best radio soundbites from the Spanish Grand Prix

"I lost the car."

Pastor Maldonado, who is becoming the master of delivering bad news, finds a new way of telling Lotus he's crashed after putting his E22 in the wall on the exit to Turn 3.

"First question Checo, why did Jenson get by?"
"There was no grip."
"Right. Well we have to learn from it, mate. Ok?"

Sergio Perez must have felt like he is back living with his parents as he gets a a dressing down from his pit wall after his former team-mate got in front of him before a qualifying run.

"I have no drive, I'm sorry, I have no drive."

Sebastian Vettel sounds remarkably apologetic for a problem completely out of his control. Maybe he was expecting race engineer Guillaume Roquelin to tell him "tough luck"?

"Remember what Charlie said about the photo. Remember what Charlie said about the photo."

Having fallen foul of the FIA once this season, Red Bull reminds Daniel Ricciardo not to take too long to get to parc ferme for the post-qualifying picture after grabbing third.

"My rear end is all over the place."
"Immodium is good for that."

Sky Sports F1's Martin Brundle delivers the line of the season from the commentary booth after Lewis Hamilton complains about the behaviour of his Mercedes during the race.

"Lewis, zero to Nico last lap, gap 3.8."
"Where have you been the last couple of laps, man?"
"Just letting you get through the traffic."

We can only assume Nico Rosberg was approaching his team-mate's car to the sound of the Jaws music in his final stint, as an increasingly frantic Hamilton berates race engineer Peter Bonnington for leaving him alone.

"Three turns down the for next stop."
"No, not three, why are you doing that? I want the normal two."

Hamilton continues to get worked up over his next pit stop, this time as he disagrees with Mercedes on the best changes to make the front wing angle.

"How was last lap? Was it too slow?"
"No pace was good at the end of the stint."
"Then why did you bring me?"
"We are keeping you on the optimum strategy. Gap to Nico four seconds."

Bonnington continues to display the sort of calmness under pressure needed in a job spent talking to F1 drivers all day as Hamilton starts to see a silver car growing in his mirrors.

"How much time did I lose in the pit-stop?"
"Nico lost more in traffic, don't worry about that now."

Bonnington struggles to keep Hamilton's mind on the job in hand as Rosberg gets within two seconds of his lead.

"Who made these calls?"

It's safe to say Kimi Raikkonen is slightly unimpressed with Ferrari's calls from the pit wall after seeing Fernando Alonso get by him on a superior strategy.

Nate is assistant editor of ESPNF1 Nate got his first taste of paddock reporting with British Superbikes and Moto GP in 2012. A stint in rugby followed before Nate, whose childhood hero was Michael Schumacher, found his way back to motorsport when he joined ESPNF1 as assistant editor in February 2014.