DEAR JEANNE & LEONARD: My mother died more than a year ago, and according to her will, everything she owned is to be divided 50-50 between my sister “Jackie” and me. The will also names us co-executors of the estate. Shortly after Mom’s death, Jackie moved into Mom’s home, where she’s been living rent-free ever since. Not only that, she’s using Mom’s checking account to pay all the expenses — utilities, gardener, taxes and the like. Jackie says she wants to buy the house (and she has the money), but I can’t get her to complete the paperwork. The problem isn’t the price, which Jackie agrees is fair; she just never moves forward on the purchase. The attorney helping with Mom’s estate has made several suggestions for resolving this situation, but Jackie’s ignored them. What should I do? My sister and I have always gotten along, and I don’t want to put a strain on our relationship.— S.A.P., NORTHERN CALIFORNIA

Dear S.A.P.: So Jackie has appropriated both a house and a checking account that are half yours, and you’re concerned that you might do something that would strain your relationship? What you should be worrying about is the fact that your sister is helping herself to your inheritance.

Since Jackie refuses to listen to the attorney the two of you retained, you need to hire an attorney who represents only you (i.e., one who doesn’t also represent your sister, as the current attorney does). Your own attorney can tell you how to force your sister to either buy the house or move out. Plus, the attorney can help you put a stop to your sister’s writing checks for her personal benefit from your mother’s estate.

We know, you don’t want to have a lawyer come between you and your sister. But she’s given you only two choices: Let her continue to take advantage of you, or get tough and risk upsetting her. If you opt for the path of least resistance, you’re inviting Jackie to never move and never buy you out.

DEAR JEANNE & LEONARD: My girlfriend “Hannah” loves to spend money. She’s still in school, and she spends every dollar she can persuade her parents to give her – they don’t have much. Then she’s always getting me to treat her to manicures, pedicures, facials and meals out. I really like Hannah and often think she’s the one for me. But I’m more a saver than a spender, and I worry that Hannah won’t change. What do you think? — PETER, NEW YORK

DEAR PETER: Why would Hannah want to change when everyone keeps treating her? Try spending your money at the rate you, not she, prefers, and see how Hannah responds. You’ll find out soon enough if she’s the one.

Page 2 of 2 - DEAR JEANNE & LEONARD: I feel like I’ve been taken advantage of. Because I didn’t like my last apartment, I spoke to the rental office about moving. They said if I left before my lease ended, they’d try to find someone to replace me, and if they succeeded, I’d get my last month’s rent back, which they were holding as a deposit. So I found a new place and moved out six weeks before the lease expired. The rental office found a new tenant right away, but the guy couldn’t move in for two months, so I ended up losing my deposit. Shouldn’t they have tried to find someone who could move in sooner instead of renting to the first person to come along? — FRUSTRATED, YORK, PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR FRUSTRATED: It’s too bad the person who rented your apartment couldn’t move in before your lease expired. But you can’t expect the rental office to turn away a would-be tenant just to help you out. Their job is to rent out apartments, not bail out folks who want to break their lease. We’re sorry you lost your last month’s rent, but the rental office did nothing wrong.

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