Gay B.C. Mountie feels he was forced out for his activism against bullying of LGBT youth

Tad Milmine said he resigned from the RCMP after it became clear to him that the Mounties didn’t want him to continue his Bullying Ends Here program.Photo by
Les Bazso

Tad Milmine has absolutely no doubt that he was saving the lives of children. In the Surrey RCMP he had his dream job, and outside work he was running a successful anti-bullying program.

But in a brutal irony, Milmine — who is gay and was bullied as a teen — believes the RCMP tried to bully him out of his program and ultimately his job.

“There is no doubt I’ve been harassed since last May,” Milmine told The Province on Wednesday. “And last week I was left with no option, aside from resign, or stop doing my program and being a Mountie.

“But I simply cannot stop doing this. There is a young man up there that is looking down on me.”

Milmine, 40, was talking about Jamie Hubley, a gay youth in Ontario who took his own life at age 15 because of relentless bullying.

Milmine started Bullying Ends Here after reading Hubley’s story in October 2011. It could have been him. Growing up in Ontario, Milmine had considered suicide, too.

“It was one of those ‘a-ha’ moments,” Milmine said. “It took Jamie’s tragedy for me to find my mission in life and prevent further tragedies.”

Milmine started making informal presentations to schools in Surrey, and word spread. Since late 2012 — on his own time and spending his own money — Milmine has made more than 300 presentations.

He has spoken to about 60,000 youth, and received 9,200 emails through his website. He says he’s answered every one. And 26 of those emails, Milmine said, tell him that he saved someone’s life. He’s received a number of awards and honours, including personal congratulations from Laureen Harper, at a recent gala in Ottawa.

Milmine said his superiors in the RCMP were initially pleased with Bullying Ends Here. Even Canada’s top cop, Comm. Bob Paulson, called personally to congratulate him on the good work, he said.

But, Milmine said, his program started to be questioned within the B.C. RCMP. He said a supervisor sent him to an RCMP psychologist after watching one presentation. The question seemed to be about Milmine’s dedication to his volunteer work, and potential liabilities if anyone ever alleged inappropriate contact with youth.

“I knew something was up when my employer was sending me to a psychologist,” he said.

But the psychologist fully endorsed Milmine and the propriety of his work, he said. And in May 2013 the RCMP offered him a full-time “secondment” working in an office anti-bullying role.

Confidential email from teens, though — a crucial part of the program’s comfort level and success, according to Milmine — would be monitored, and the program would be bound in red tape. Just another 1-800 line, without Milmine’s powerful story and example.

Milmine turned the secondment down.

“It was very clear they were shutting Bullying Ends Here down,” he said.

In July 2013 the RCMP responded with an “ethics” complaint.

“Milmine must be fully aware of the organizational risks and that he cannot be a free agent on his own time if he is representing the RCMP,” the document said. “The Bullying Ends Here campaign is in direct conflict with (RCMP) youth strategy programs.”

Since that time, Milmine said, a number of interactions with management have confused and stressed him. On the one hand, his peers love the program, but management wants it to go away, he said.

Milmine said that late last year he took a stress leave because he could not focus on his police duties. However, at the same time, with a doctor’s blessing, he said, he continued his school visits and anti-bullying campaign. It all came to a head last week, he said, as he faced a potential code of conduct process.

Showing The Province the document that superiors served him, Milmine said: “For lack of a better word it’s a cease and desist — stop doing what you are doing immediately, and that would include no more emails, no more presentations or website updates, no public engagements.”

A superior “made it very clear they do not, cannot, and will not support my initiative,” Milmine said. “I said, ‘Respectfully, sir, I’m going to go home and answer emails from these youth.’ I said, ‘I am not doing anything wrong, and I quit.’”

But Milmine said there is a happy ending to the story. Among the international agencies that support Milmine’s work, the Calgary Police Service has offered a job, and will fully support Bullying Ends Here in Alberta and other cities around the world.

Milmine said he will be sworn in to Calgary’s force next week.

“There is no doubt what Jamie wants me to do,” Milmine said. “He does not want me to stop, and his family does not want me to stop.”

Milmine still wonders why his outside-the-box program wasn’t supported by the RCMP, but he has a theory.

“I’ve been coast to coast several times, and the headlines are always ‘Gay Mountie,’” Milmine said. “And I can’t help but wonder if my sexuality is playing a very large role in all of this.”

But the B.C. RCMP disputes Milmine’s perception of the conflict.

“The RCMP, and various units of the RCMP, have supported Tad fully with his anti-bullying initiative and were shocked and disappointed with his unexpected resignation at a time when we were working with him to resolve his HR policy conflicts,” spokesman Sgt. Rob Vermeulen said in a statement.

"While we were very supportive of Tad’s work, the RCMP does have clear policies and guidelines with respect to financial transparency and accountability in secondary employment that applies to all employees. These policies are in place to protect both the organization and its members.

"Among these policies are strict conflict of interest guidelines with respect to the solicitation of funds, the image and uniform of the RCMP and the perception that the RCMP is involved in soliciting those funds. Policy compliance is unbiased and not geared to any individual or program.

“While we respect Tad’s passion, and have made every effort to accommodate him, we had also hoped that Tad would work with us to find the balance between his outreach efforts and the operational needs of his detachment, regular assigned duties and adherence to HR policies.”

• You have really inspired me to share my story of my past of being a victim of bullying. It all started in grade 6 and went on for 3 years.

Oh and you being gay and admitting it makes you that much more awesome! You’re an amazing person, and I will definitely try to reach my dreams.

• Today I saw a kid push another kid over from another school and I went right up to them and said just stop and leave. I felt like I made a difference in the world I was so happy.

• I’m sorry for taking up a lot of the page but I was so afraid and i was still considering suicide but this (your) speech has told me that i am able to move on

• I just wanted to share my thoughts and let you know that you are making a big change in the world and I am one of the many that you have challenged to be better and see things from a different view, so thank you!:)

Somewhere, Christy Clark must be laughing her head off right about now. The former Liberal premier suffered...

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