I also bought some of the spices necesssary for a home-made phaal, having been inspired by Louis.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MAN WAS NOT MEANT TO MEDDLE IN THESE MATTERS!!!!!

You know the saying:

Don't let the bottom fall out of your world. Have a phall and let the world fall out of your bottom.

Louis

P.S. If you absolutely, positively have to do this to your insides I have two recommendations: 1) buy/make some lassi and get hold of at least 2 litres of cheap lager, preferably Indian lager. These are the only things to quench the fires successfully. 2) Put a roll of toilet paper in the fridge at least 3 hours before eating. I am not joking. Preferably use one of those aloe vera infused luxury ones that will leave cooling balm on your brown eye.

"I walked in to a burnin' ring of fire..."

(Wow, two Johnny Cash references on ATBC in one day! What are the odds?)

Quote

I really am serious about this. A properly made phall is part of India's revenge on Britain and as such is classified under the Geneva convention as a chemical weapon. If, when said curry has passed through to the latter stages of your digestive tract, you are not found crying like a 5 year old girl with a skinned knee and holding onto the toilet with molten lava shooting out of your arse, then you will have earned my eternal digestive respect! Good luck soldier. Stiff upper (?) lip!

Now, you see, Louis, talk like this just makes me want to do it all the more!

(You can expect to hear from my lawyers in the morning.)

--------------"Rich is just mad because he thought all titties had fur on them until last week when a shorn transvestite ruined his childhood dreams by jumping out of a spider man cake and man boobing him in the face lips." - Erasmus