Thursday, May 21, 2009

Now this is how you ring in the new year! You load up one of the Campbell's Soup kids with a tray of champagne, jam a knife and fork in the pig's back, and start celebrating!

We won't begrudge anyone their New Year's bubbly, but we do question the propriety of the stuck pig. Stabbed, he trots gaily from the kitchen, his wounds nothing more than handy slots for the silverware.

The celebrants would, in spite of their inebriation, be horrified if not for the pig's sunny disposition. Seeing that terrible grin, they clink glasses and wait for the big moment.

The ball drops—5! 4! 3! 2! 1!—and, right on cue, the pig drops dead, a smile on his face. (Did you see him? He was the star of the show!) Out with the old, in with the new, and all that. Plenty more demented pigs where he came from.

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Diagnosis

What is Suicide Food? Suicide Food is any depiction of animals that act as though they wish to be consumed. Suicide Food actively participates in or celebrates its own demise. Suicide Food identifies with the oppressor. Suicide Food is a bellwether of our decadent society. Suicide Food says, “Hey! Come on! Eating meat is without any ethical ramifications! See, Mr. Greenjeans? The animals aren’t complaining! So what's your problem?” Suicide Food is not funny.