Two Wheels. One Dark Lord.

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Snow. N2O. Portlandia.

It snowed again. The shit just fucking melted and we got hit with 6 more inches and freezing temps. I shouldn’t complain. It’s not like I commute, or even have to leave to house to go to work. I have it pretty good, actually.

This week was hell. I got a tooth pulled. I payed extra for nitrous-oxide. The doctor wasn’t stingy with his N2O tank either. They don’t call that shit hippy crack for nothin’. N2O made the entire experience FUN. The hole in my head is healing up and the rollers/trainer are back in full use again.

Speaking of the trainer….

I walked in the door the other day and was presented with this perfect opportunity for a picture. He made it about 40 minutes, and even had a little sweat puddle action going on.

Got this from Mike G. on Facecrack. It’s a series called Portlandia on IFC starting tonight at 10:30pm. I am DVR’ing this shit. I watched all the clips and was rolling on the floor. Especially the dumpster diving couple. I hear competition is HUGE in PDX for dumpster diving. Check out this clip of the bike messenger. I love the whistle.

This time next week I’ll be getting ready for my trip out west and checking the weather reports every hour. I booked direct flights from IND-PHX but the flights are on US Air which is the worst airline around. I hope to hell I don’t have any problems getting there. Or home.

I am looking forward to finally meeting Lar, another female DC reader and commenter. She’s riding her bike up from Tucson and staying a couple nights. I don’t know what all Dirrrty Biker has planned. Miles and miles of riding. A day in Sedona to see D2. A night in Flag to hang with The Gnome. Holla if you want to hang out.

@tony, the tweekers got clean and this is what happened. you gotta go to the link and watch all the clips. this one is the best. “the dream of the 90’s is alive in portland…tattoo ink never runs dry….”.

The Portlandia clips were funny. Okay. Fine. We all laughed in our beers and had fun pointing out the people we knew in the videos, and I recognized the lavendar tallbike I’d fixed last summer). Actual Portland Mayor Sam Adams was a hoot pretending to be his own chief of staff or something. The messengers all winked and nodded at the whistle in-joke (whistles have never been legal for Portland bike messengers in the modern era). It was all great fun. Really.

Now millions of underemployed hipsters with a shit-ton of money and nearly zero fashion sense are moving here. Five of them just came to the door asking if they could camp out in my yard. Until September. I said maybe but that their pet ferret would have to find lodging elsewhere.

Next week my niece is hosting her Texas-based Facebook buddy for a week. In addition to catching the Decemberists show, they’ll be heading over to Black Hole for an official souvenir Portlandia Piercing (there’s a tiny rose engraved on the free-range, craft-framebuilder-made, LUGGED stainless steel stud).

I am waiting for the next cool town to step up and take its turn. C’mon, it’s only fair.

1. I was born in NYC and lived everywhere until I was 12. Moved to Portland in 1975. Lived here over 35 years, long enough to have grown the requisite rain-proof webbing between my toes, and long enough to form an informed opinion about the rampant growth in the number of “young people who come here to retire”.

2. Nice graphic, but all the bike parts in the world will not save us from ourselves. It’s especially too late for all the kids who ride [expletive deleted] brakeless fixies in traffic.

3. Yes, that is really his name, Hizzoner Sam Adams. And he seems to have survived quite a lot of scandal reasonably well, but I’m pretty sure he will be a one-term mayor.

4. Yes, that IS the woman who used to play with Sleater-Kinney. Every time we go to Seattle we’re tempted to stop and take a picture of the Sleater-Kinney Road sign outside of Olympia; but because we always seem to encounter the sign at 60 mph we end up thinking better of it and keep going. (Plus, Team Dresch was a better band.)