The social costs of the faith.

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We are all unique individuals, no two people alike, as we live, we change, grow, mature and develop our own preferences, desires, beliefs and world view etc. I like myself and I'm glad that I'm different in the way that there has never been or ever will be another like me after I cease to exist. I enjoy the freedom to be myself and make choices that are not forced upon me, it makes life worth living. Imagine if we all fit the same mold, how far behind we would be in our development as a human race.

Unfortunately in Christianity, individuality is a threat. When I was a christian my reality was that what made me me, was just not good enough. The quote below says it better than I could.

“We had to become like Jesus Christ and die to ourselves. In other words, you kill your own personality off and try and replace it with Jesus Christ. When I did leave I had killed myself off to such a point that there was nothing of me left, and that’s what keeps you in there because you can’t relate to anyone else.”~ Billy Jackson.

I'm sure others can see and that I'm not alone realizing the damage that can be done to a person, not just robbing them of who they are at the core but also in normal everyday social functioning, living in a complex world with others that may not think like you. So many problems I had relating to others, normal people that were not bogged down with the world's purpose, of being this big soul filtering machine based on whether we go to a heaven as a reward or a hell for punishment.

So many non believers could not stand me.I was trying to be like Jesus, but I was a hypocrite as it was impossible to be as perfect as he was but that didn't stop me from trying and much embarrassment and social suicide ensued.It was terrible and I made lots of enemies too and looking back I do see how I was pretty much *nuts* to them and I don't blame them for disliking me or wanting to except my strange and unprovable beliefs. It was easier to stick with people just like you, other believers but in the real world it's just not possible unless you live an incredibly sheltered life.

Still feeling the negative affects of this mind trip but things are getting better each day.Rediscovering my unique personality after trying to kill it off for so long is my focus for now until I'm fully recovered.

I'm not Jesus, don't want to be and never could be in the first place. The damages to self esteem, self acceptance,social function etc. are much too great and too much a burden, to place on human beings that just have this one special life to live.