Either Necco wafers or Pixy stix. Each was some heinous isotope of chalk.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 12

10/10/2018

Apples. My mom made me throw them away anyway because of the razor blade scare.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 13

10/11/2018

NO! I would take all of those (except candy corn) Those wee boxes of fucking RAISINS were the absolute worst. Thank god I could shove them off on my mum and dad.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 14

10/11/2018

Good & Plenty.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 15

10/11/2018

Those generic candies wrapped in black and orange wax paper. I don't even know what they were, they went directly into the trash.

Boston baked beans were pretty nasty too

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 16

10/11/2018

These cheap and tasteless treats.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 17

10/11/2018

I remember vividly some knob handing out pennies - not to eat, mind you, but as a treat. It was only a few pennies, not even enough to buy chiclets ffs. Also got a Jack Chick tract one year - between bullshit like this and the profuse sweating resulting from my costume, I am amazed that I remained in the South.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 18

10/11/2018

It took to R11, but the thread can be closed now. It’s candy corn. There was nothing worse, and the worst of the worst is when someone would throw in lose bits of candy corn in our buckets. The germs, the laziness, oh my.

Anyone giving out shit candy would be better off just shutting off their porch light and not answering the door. Don’t waste the children’s time, old biddies!

Who can ever forget the taste of chewing those big red wax lips? Gross and wonderful at the same time.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 21

10/11/2018

R2 The texture alone of those faded orange "peanuts" was enough to make you gag.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 22

10/11/2018

I love Tootsie Rolls but not Tootsie Pops.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 23

10/11/2018

These candy pumpkins were awful too. The bastard cousin of candy corn.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 24

10/11/2018

Here's something for those of you who hate candy corn and suffer from trypophobia

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 25

10/11/2018

In my 10 years living in Manhattan I received 0 trick or treaters. I've now moved to the suburbs, into an elite neighborhood. What are the chances I'll have to participate handing out candy this year? Do people really target these kind of areas for trick or treating like they do on TV?

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 26

10/11/2018

Della Reese's Pieces

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 27

10/11/2018

Oranges. Seriously, kids DO NOT want fruit at Halloween. They want CANDY.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 28

10/11/2018

Where I grew up, we'd mostly get fruit and nuts, with the occasional and much-prized funsize Mars or Cadbury brand bar. The worst thing you could get was a handful of monkey nuts. Of course things have changed a lot nearly 30 years later. I can't imagine children today being content with walnuts and hazelnuts (half the fun was smashing the shells).

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 29

10/11/2018

Neccos for sure. I never minded Mary Janes or Tootsie Rolls but they were usually the last remaining pieces in my haul.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 30

10/11/2018

[quote]I can't imagine children today being content with walnuts and hazelnuts (half the fun was smashing the shells).

Kids today are all allergic to nuts

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 31

10/11/2018

r16

Those orange and black things were peanut butter taffy. Boston Baked Beans are delicious. They are just candy coated peanuts.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 32

10/11/2018

r26

Well having your name on a registered sex offender list will do that.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 33

10/11/2018

Black Cow Candy. I hated those goddamn things.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 34

10/11/2018

I never liked Rockets candy (apparently called Smarties in the U.S.?) But those were at least edible. There were always hard, taffy-like candies in ugly wrappers that went right into the trash.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 35

10/11/2018

There was always that one mom in the neighborhood who thought she was better than everyone else and made something homemade, like cookies or hand-dipped candy, individually wrapped in colored cling wrap with orange and black ribbons or something... LADY YOU SUCK!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 36

10/11/2018

R36 I'd so much rather get homemade cookies than mass-market candy. YOU SUCK.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 37

10/11/2018

My mother told me her dad used to drop his fist in children’s candy bags and flick his finger against them to mimic the sound of candy falling in. Apparently, he didn’t want to buy actual candy for the little mooches.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 38

10/11/2018

R26 I grew up in such a neighborhood. It wouls be hundreds of trick or treaters. Many of them would a tually be bussed in. I don’t know who these people were, renting busses and gathering large numbers of children, but it was quite the ordeal in my area. My parents later moved to a gated community, and there has never been a trick or treater except for a few children from the block. There are several connecting roads, and the gate is very easy to ignore from the sides if you’re on foot. Nobody tries it.

I’d say kids sniff out the nice places (as long as they aren’t in a gated community) so you better prepare yourself. Or you could be the one fuddy-duddy who turns out the light and ignores the doorbell.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 39

10/11/2018

I agree about Mary Janes because they were always stale and hard as a rock.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 40

10/11/2018

Candy corn and those hideous band-aid colored peanuts. That was stuff you just threw away, or let your dog eat.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 41

10/11/2018

Not in a million years would I have fed those to my dog, r41.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 42

10/11/2018

WTF are Mary Jane's?

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 43

10/11/2018

I hated Good 'n Plenty because black licorice grosses me out.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 44

10/11/2018

Raisinets.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 45

10/11/2018

There is no "worst" candy. In my neighborhood we were all smartalek jimmies and johnnies and janes and we got a kick out of the strange shit weird old people threw in our pillow cases. There was a lot of fun and vengeful tricks inspired by the crap.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 46

10/11/2018

r43, a real old fart would recognize these.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 47

10/11/2018

I think today's Mary Janes would be the hit of the evening, particularly if you live in Colorado, California...

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 48

10/11/2018

I actually liked MaryJanes. The flavor of peanut butter and molasses was a good one.

But like everything else the recipe has obviously changed over the years.

The photo at R47 is surely a joke though: "produced with genetic engineering"? I don't see that on other photos of the product.....

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 49

10/11/2018

Good and Plenty! I hate it, so I always give it out, because I'm not tempted to eat it.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 50

10/11/2018

The worst was candy from a vending machine in a gas station's men's room. It tasted just like rubber.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 51

10/11/2018

Dots

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 52

10/11/2018

I wonder how many orange peanut and candy corn givers use that rationale, r50.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 53

10/11/2018

R51 tell us how that managed to be halloween candy on trick or treat night!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 54

10/11/2018

Pennies by some frau who thought she was doing us a favor by not giving us candy

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 55

10/11/2018

The dentist in our neighborhood always gave away toothbrushes. WIth his name and telephone number on them.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 56

10/11/2018

[quote]What are the chances I'll have to participate handing out candy this year?

Pretty small. What’s more common in the suburbs are “trunk or treats”— people from the neighborhood or local church all parking in a lot and kids go from car to car rather than house to house.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 57

10/11/2018

Stale popcorn balls wrapped in cellophane.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 58

10/11/2018

When I was a kid a lady down the street would make those Rice Krispy treats- they were WAY better than candy.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 59

10/11/2018

"Kids today are all allergic to nuts"

Only in your imagination, dear.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 60

10/11/2018

Bitches, that's nothing. I had a mentally challenged uncle who insisted on picking out his own candy to give to the trick-or-treaters one year, where usually my grandmother bought him the candy and just let him do the handing out. It was a tense discussion in the days leading up to it, wondering what in God's name he'd end up handing out to any of the kids that were stupid enough to knock on his door.

I was one of those kids.

Cough drops.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 61

10/11/2018

I was so embarrassed by my mom. She handed out carrots and Capri Sun one year.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 62

10/11/2018

A candy called "Dots" which look and taste like the little rubber bumpers you put on the bottom of something to prevent scratching.

I love Dots! But only the red ones. Anyone ever get gum? Talk about a buzzkill.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 65

10/11/2018

Necco wafers, Smarties and Bit O Honey were the worst. I’d eat the cheap peanut butter taffy crap before any of those. Never heard of Mary Janes.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 66

10/11/2018

My favorites were Smarties. They were like crack.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 67

10/11/2018

This is Dots Candy.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 68

10/11/2018

There used to be a sweet old lady that lived down the street from us when were were kids. She even had one of those split doors where you can open just the top portion. On Halloween she'd open the upper portion of the door with a big smile on her face and say "do you want an apple or a cookie?" Sadly, the kids would discard them all in the street in front of her house. It was sad walking to school the next day and seeing all the apples and broken cookies scattered in front of her house.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 69

10/11/2018

I remember one Halloween my mom ran out of candy before the evening was over and ended up digging through her purse and under the car seats for pieces of candy and tic tacs, etc and wrapping them in cellophane.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 70

10/11/2018

There's always the one asshole dentist that would hand out tooth brushes with his phone number printed on them.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 71

10/11/2018

A Triscut

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 72

10/11/2018

One lady on our street gave out sandwiches, usually egg. To outdo her, another neighbor handed out Kentucky Fried Chicken one year, slices of pizza the next.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 73

10/11/2018

Some kid last year said this when I opened my door: “My mom said I to tell you I’m allergic to peanuts!”

I replied, “Well, I guess you better be careful then.” I was giving our Skittles.

What if I had been giving candy made with peanut? “Tough shit then, Defecto!”

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 74

10/11/2018

Chuckles.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 75

10/11/2018

A lot of the repeated worst-ever choices here are some of my favorites.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 76

10/11/2018

When I was a kid, there was an epidemic of people putting razor blades, pins and needles in apples and candy. I heard about thousands of kids around the country biting into these tainted treats and being rushed to the hospital with bleeding mouths and stomachs. It was nightmare!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 77

10/11/2018

Urban legends aside, poisoned candy has happened:

[quote]In a 1974 case, an 8-year-old boy from Deer Park, Texas, died after eating a cyanide-laced package of Pixy Stix. A subsequent police investigation eventually determined that the poisoned candy had been planted in his trick-or-treat pile by the boy's father, Ronald Clark O'Bryan, who also gave out poisoned candy to other children in an attempt to cover up the murder, though no other children consumed the poisoned treats. The murderer, who had wanted to claim life insurance money, was executed in 1984. In this case, the distribution of poisoned candy is true, but no children other than the intended victim were harmed

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 78

10/11/2018

Maybe Smarties.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 79

10/11/2018

Apples and raisins- straight to the trash.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 80

10/11/2018

I wonder what the percentage is of dentists who give out toothbrushes. They’re always known for it. It’s the worse cliche. Does anyone know of any dentists who actually are into giving out good stuff to trick or treaters? (If nothing else, filling cavities is job security. Get with the program, dentists!)

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 81

10/11/2018

Candy corn and anything made from the same stuff (Halloween Pumpkins). Any hard candy or apples.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 82

10/11/2018

When I was four years old, I remember trick/treating at a nearby convent. The nuns gave me a handful of popcorn from a big bowl and a copper penny. Strange how vivid that memory still is and I'm 56.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 83

10/11/2018

The guy who ran the local Coca-Cola Bottling Company lived down the street, and he passed out full cans of ice cold Coke.

We thought he was a fucking God.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 84

10/11/2018

Is candy corn just dyed wax?

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 85

10/11/2018

Sugar Daddy - excellent for chipping a tooth on

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 86

10/11/2018

On if my neighbors worked for marvel. He handed out comic books!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 87

10/11/2018

Ha. I bite my thumb at your meek Halloween indignities. I grew up in the Bible Belt. I had neighbors who gave out miniature bibles . You better believe we gave that house wide swath.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 88

10/11/2018

Homemade Candy apples - who spends the time dipping perfecty good apples in caramel or shellac, turning them into indigestible food?

In my small town, there was the one house we all made a bee-line to: The big white house on the corner, owned by a doctor. The maid woukd bring us into the kitchen for cokes and a bag of candy.

The same year, there was one house where the owner would come to the door and recite: "No tricks, no treats, shoo shoo shoo!" This was on a busy street, so the guy would have to willingly answer the door throughout the night and say that. Who does that to kids? (I rememer this incident 60 years later!)

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 89

10/11/2018

I knew a woman who had a major gambling problem, from a very prominent family. One Halloween, her husband was out of town, but he had bought several hundred dollars worth of candy for her and their kids to give out- it was a large community. She decided to return the candy for cash and ended up giving away boxes of low carb breakfast bars and gerneric panty hose she got for free from a community food bank.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 90

10/11/2018

I knew some old bitch that would always hand out them Grand Maul Seizures.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 91

10/11/2018

Cheap-ass 'Pumpkin Teeth' -

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 92

10/11/2018

[quote]Grand Maul Seizures

Why do a certain, select few of you think this is funny? It isn't.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 93

10/11/2018

The very worst are those little colorful candy dots on paper. WTF? Those went straight to the trash.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 94

10/11/2018

I lived down the street from mobster Sam Giancana. His housekeeper would give out full-sized boxes of Cracker Jacks to anyone who had the verve to ring the doorbell. The welcome mat said "Get out!"

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 95

10/11/2018

R93, MARY!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 96

10/11/2018

Raisins or Good n plenty awful... I loved the black and orange wrapped mysteries and Bit'O Honeys... Great idea upthread....may make Rice Crispy Treats this year for family Every Halloween, sis and I would line up all our candy which once was a pillowcase-full and offer trades with each other till we fell asleep.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 97

10/11/2018

Apples....fuck you lady!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 98

10/11/2018

I love Good n Plenty.

Just bought a 5lb. bulk bag on Amazon for only $8.90 ! Best candy deal ever ! FIVE POUNDS!!!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 99

10/11/2018

^^ Will end up doing most of it himself, alas -

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 100

10/11/2018

R99, have fun fattie! 🐽

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 101

10/11/2018

R96. No no no. Roy Rogers horse was *not* named Mary. Why do gays get this wrong? It was *Trigger*. As in *that bitch totally got TRIGGERED by grand maul seizure jokes!” Dale Evans horse was Buttermilk.

See? And Trigger? I think the Grand Maul jokes are funny. I take 3 different prescriptions daily for mine. Suck it up, Buttermilk.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 102

10/11/2018

For me, definitely Good n Plenty. I got them the first time I went Trick or Treating at the age of five. They were so Godawful, that was the last time I ever went near 'em. That was in 1979!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 103

10/11/2018

[quote]The very worst are those little colorful candy dots on paper. WTF? Those went straight to the trash.

Don't laugh but I actually like those things for some reason, even though the company has yet to master the art of not having the damned paper stick to the back of the dots when you pop them off. (You'd think it would've gotten it all figured out by now.)

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 104

10/11/2018

[quote] I love Good n Plenty.

Charlie says you are brainwashed.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 105

10/11/2018

Candy corn. And now here's one of my favorite childhood memories.

Tom Maupin was a young, gay man who owned Maupintour, a travel agency catering to upscale travelers. He lived with his partner and maid in one of the most beautiful houses in town, a beautiful, slightly spooky looking mansion that was perfect for Halloween.

One year we went trick or treating to his house after hearing that he gave away great candy. After walking up the curvy, gaslight lined walkway he was there waiting for us and opened the door. His partner and maid were there in the foyer, and in a corner by the door was a huge barrel filled with candy. He made each of us do a trick (we all told riddles or jokes), then smiled and said "okay, dig in!"

My sister and I looked at each other, not sure what to do, then looked back at him. He nodded at the barrel and said "go ahead, dig in!" I think all four of us got wide-eyed for a second, then went crazy for the next thirty seconds or so, yelling and screaming while we filled our pillowcases with candy. His partner and maid were laughing their heads off, and it was one of the most pure moments of joy I've ever experienced. After about thirty seconds had passed he said "okay, time's up. Happy Halloween!" We all screamed THANK YOU! and Happy Halloween and were still screaming all the way to the sidewalk. And it was all great candy, too - full-size candy bars, Tootsie Pops, Milk Duds, Chicklets and gum balls.

I never got to thank him for giving me one of my best childhood memories, and for being the first and only positive gay role model I knew as a child.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 106

10/11/2018

My favorites were Reese’s Peanut Butter cups, and I get bags and bags of full-sized ones each year to shower on trick-or-treaters.

Not once has anyone rung my doorbell : (

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 107

10/11/2018

Awwwwww!!! R106 is about the sweetest story i’ve ever heard!!

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 108

10/11/2018

Oh Henry and Baby Ruth. They didn’t have the fun size good candy bars like Milky Way when I was a kid.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 109

10/11/2018

[quote] They didn’t have the fun size good candy bars like Milky Way when I was a kid.

Even regular "full" size candy bars now are only about half the size they used to be at multiples the price.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 110

10/11/2018

There were twin ladies on my block. One of them gave out Smarties and the other gave out Dum--dums, to even things out.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 111

10/12/2018

[quote]Good and Plenty! I hate it

But you'd be orgasming over "Good 'n' Fruity"

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 112

10/12/2018

I was pretty picky as a child. I didn't like Tootsie Rolls (though the fruit ones were good because they tasted like Starburst), I didn't like Dum Dums or any kind of lollipops, I didn't much care for the Mary Janes or whatever those candies were that were wrapped in the plain orange or black paper. Things like Reese's Cups, M&Ms, Smarties, Hershey Bars, etc., were my favorite.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 113

10/12/2018

Reese's Peanut Butter Cups were the gold standard.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 114

10/12/2018

The neighbor next door to the toothbrush-dispensing dentist was a recluse and usually turned off his porch lights and acted like no one was home, but one year seemed to have relented and lit the porch. My parents insisted that my brother and I go ring the doorbell even though we were afraid (the rumor was that he'd cut off your fingers if you rang his doorbell and ran; I don't know why, but this was what we all thought) but they insisted. So, we trudged up his long driveway and did the usual "Trick or treat" and he had no candy to hand out (or so he said) so instead he gave each of us a dollar. He said he liked our costumes. It was the year my mother had made Indian (excuse me, "Indigenous peoples") costumes out of burlap that itched like crazy and by the time we got home, we were both covered in little red welts wherever the burlap touched our skin.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 115

10/12/2018

Finally a thread I can relate to. There was this hermit lady, she lived three rocks down from us. She had one working arm and leg so she was doing pretty well. Anyway one year she gave each of us only one scorpion leg each for Halloween! Not even a lousy locust.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 116

10/12/2018

R116 Tell us about your Halloween costume.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 117

10/12/2018

R117: I went as a skeleton

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 118

10/12/2018

Back in the dark ages, there was no such thing as fun size candy. You either got a full sized candy bar, an apple or a little bag full of loose small candy like candy corn. We lived close to a really nice trailer park (I know...oxymoron), which was great because each trailer was about ten feet away from the next one. We would make a KILLING there. My mother used to make us throw out the apples (because of possible razor blades) and the bags of loose candy because she didn't want us eating anything that strangers had handled.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 119

10/12/2018

Bump.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 120

10/13/2018

What a morbid story r78

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 121

10/13/2018

Did anyone else take their candy to the hospital to be x-rayed?

My mother pulled the same scam on us every year. We'd take the candy to be x-rayed, then she'd take us to Friendly's and let us order as much food as we wanted (in my case usually a Fishamajig, fries and coleslaw, and a Jim Dandy....sometimes a Fribble too) in order to soften us up by sickening us to the point that we couldn't even think about eating candy.

When we got home, stuffed to the gills and feeling like we were about to die, the hammer would fall. She'd tell us that she had been thinking about it and the candy was probably radioactive now and unsafe to eat, but she'd pay us $10 for our trouble. Then she'd promise not to have it x-rayed the following year. Every year.

What she didn't know was that we had hidden all the good stuff before going to the hospital, so we were only losing Dum Dums, Charleston Chews, raisins, and Junior Mints.

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 122

10/13/2018

by Gold Star Eldergay

reply 123

10/13/2018

I loved the little boxes of raisins and the apples. I was that kid. But I loved the candy, too. Except for black licorice.

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