August 04, 2010

A Good Reason To End It All Now

If you are looking for a good excuse to stick a knife in your head, I can confidently recommend reading an article in Adweek this week called "Talking Tradigital."

That's right, tradigital.

Apparently "tradigital" is the new Cringe-Inducing-Buzzword-Of-The-Week among the digi-drivel set. For sheer lexical horribleness, it will surely take its place right up there with "infotainment."

According to the article, there is a "whole new breed of tradigital agencies." We seem to have a "whole new breed of agencies" every three weeks or so. How about we call a time-out for a year and instead of developing whole new breeds of agencies, we just develop some good ones. You know, the kind that know how to sell stuff.

This article -- if you can call a random collection of cliches an article -- has it all.

"Today's digitally savvy consumer has little interest in allowing you to define how he or she will experience a brand. They're people who do things on their terms."

Okay, lift the knife gently...

"What is a tradigital agency going to do better? It's going to integrate better. It's going to understand and maybe even drive the brand strategy. Then it's going to tell you how to bring it to life online"

...Point the knife carefully at your temple...

"The tradigital agency demands a seat at the table, where all are briefed on who the customer is, what the brand's objectives are, and what strategies will deliver."

...OH NO!... NOT THE "SEAT AT THE TABLE"... (PLUNGE)......AAAAH.....I'MDEad.....

So I have a question for Adweek. When did you start to take lesson plans from the first day of ad class at bad junior colleges and publish them as "think pieces?"

"Caustic Yet Truthful"

"The Most provocative Man In Advertising"

"Savage Critiques Of Digital Hype"

"Fabulously Irreverent"

CONTACT BOB

Over 60,000 people have watched Bob's talk at Advertising week, Europe

You Are Caller Number...

Click Image

Ad Contrarian Says:

"Creative people make the ads. Everyone else makes the arrangements."

"Delusional thinking isn't just acceptable in marketing today -- it's mandatory.""Good ads appeal to us as consumers. Great ads appeal to us as humans."

"Social Media: Tens of millions of disagreeable people looking to make trouble."

"As an ad medium, the web is a much better yellow pages and a much worse television."

"Sometimes success in the advertising business is about sitting quietly and letting clients proceed with their hysterical delusions."

"Marketers prefer precise answers that are wrong to imprecise answers that are right."

"Brand studies last for months, cost hundreds of thousands of dollars, and generally have less impact on business than cleaning the drapes."

"The idea that the same consumer who was frantically clicking her TV remote to escape from advertising was going to merrily click her mouse to interact with it is going to go down as one of the great advertising delusions of all time."

"Nobody really knows what "creativity" is. Every year thousands of people take a pilgrimage to find out. This involves flying to Cannes, snorting cocaine, and having sex with smokers."

"Marketers habitually overestimate the attraction of new things and underestimate the power of traditional consumer behavior."

"We don’t get them to try our product by convincing them to love our brand. We get them to love our brand by convincing them to try our product."

"In American business, there is nothing stupider than the previous generation of management."

"If the message is right, who cares what screen people see it on? If the message is wrong, what difference does it make?"

"The only form of product information on the planet less trustworthy than advertising is the shrill ravings of web maniacs."

"There's no bigger sucker than a gullible marketer convinced he's missing a trend."

"All ad campaigns are branding campaigns. Whether you intend it to be a branding campaign is irrelevant. It will create an impression of your brand regardless of your intent."

"Nobody ever got famous predicting that things would stay pretty much the same."