Young and wanting to start TTC

DH and I are 22 and got married in July. I get baby fever all the time, and reading all these posts about TTC and babies makes it even worse! DH wants babies, but not yet. We are financially stable and have a house with full time jobs. My brain says wait, but my heart (or Mother Nature) says now! Lol I know we will probably end up waiting until we finish our basement at least…

My main point of posting this other than to vent a bit, is to see how many of you TTC are young as well? I keep seeing a lot of TTC posts from women in their 30’s, but it’s a solid fact we will not be waiting that long. If you are TTC how did you conclude you were 100% ready? If you want to start but aren’t able to yet, how do you cope? It’s driving me nuts!

@KsoontobeN: I want to so badly! My husband has two part time jobs, I’ve got a job too. He wants to start trying in March, but I want to start trying today. I’m ovulating right now, so maybe I should initiate things tonight when he gets home? 😉

I’m 27 which you probably don’t consider young but I do lol. I think there’s a big difference between having baby fever and being ready to actually have a baby – just something to think about. I also don’t think you ever feel 100% ready for such a huge life change regardless of your age. It’s exciting but also scary and overwhelming. Your life as you know it will never be the same. Not that it’s a bad thing but its just different. We decided we were ready because DH is in his mid 30s and we also are well established in our careers (which makes taking leave a lot easier to do), own a home and have significant income and savings to sustain the costs of raising a child the way we want to without struggling.

I’ll be 26 in March, which I consider to still be pretty young. We’ve been actively TTC since October, NTNP since August.

My before-children bucket list included, at a minimum: finishing my bachelors and starting to advance in my career, owning a family-sized home, being happily married, having our financial house in order, doing some international travel both for work and play, and emotionally just feeling ready to bring a life into this world. We’re just there.

I can’t imagine being there at 22. Everything that I listed above, I did at 22 or older. But I’m not you! Also, I don’t think anyone is ever 100% ready. If they think they are, then they’re definitely not 100% ready!

I am 2 years older than you and we plan to wait at least 5 years before TTC. we aren’t married yet, but I know I would like to enjoy the married life before having children. Also I have goals of having a large savings, buying a larger family home, and paying off my student loan before getting pregnant. Clearly I am way too practical lol.

How long have you and your husband been together as a couple? Do you think you might look back and want to just enjoy the married life BEFORE having a baby? I think even though you are young, if you truly have the means to love and support a child, and both feel like you’re ready, then who cares how old you are.

DH and I are both 25. We got married in May and immediately started NTNP. We were shocked at how quickly we got pregnant after just two cycles. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage but the miscarriage made us realize how badly we wanted a baby so we started full blown TTC and got pregnant again on our first cycle.

With the first pregnancy we were so excited that we shared the news with our parents and we were actually surprised at their reactions. They were happy but just shocked and kept treating it like it was unplanned! They couldn’t believe that we would intentionally get pregnant at “this age”. DH and I both have graduate level degrees, amazing jobs, own a house, two cars and have been together for 7 year but living together for 4 years. We are ready to start a family in our hearts. With this pregnancy we have chosen not to tell anyone until after the first tri, not even our parents because we don’t want this happy time clouded by judgement from family members who want us to wait longer.

You will know when you’re ready. Only you and DH can make that decision for yourselves! It’s okay to want to start a family young 🙂

I am 25, and have been married 4.5 years. We own two homes, have stable well-paid jobs, and I just do not feel ready to have a child. There are a lot of things I still want to do: travel some more, finish completely remodeling our home, make more money… Sure, the thought of having a child sounds more and more appealing as I get older, but I realize there are a lot of things I will have to give up if we have one now. I am not ready to let those things go just yet. I probably will not start TTC until middle of 2016.

@KsoontobeN: In all honesty, wait a few years and enjoy being married first. I just turned 30 and got remarried (no children from my first marriage.) All of the younger couples I spoke to said they wished they had waited until they were closer to 30 to have kids. They missed out on traveling and partying and being able to sleep in on the weekends. Make a Baby Bucket List of things you and your husband want to do before having kids. Our Bucket List is almost complete. All we have left is a 3 week trip to Europe next year. I couldn’t imagine leaving an infant here in the U.S. while I toured Europe but I also have no desire to drag an infant around Europe with us.

Thanks for your responses ladies! I love reading about your personal stories and bucket lists. I think an actual written bucket list is a great idea! I’ve had a mental list for a while which includes finishing the basement, purchasing a more family practical car, and go on our belated honeymoon.

@mariwithani: I agree with you completely. With me personally, I have ALWAYS dreamed of being a mother and having a family. We all have that ‘thing’ we feel we were born to do, and I feel that mine is to become a mother. And I’m sorry to hear about the miscarriage 🙁 but congrats with this pregnancy! Sending good vibes your way 🙂

@beachbride1216: I agree with what you said as well. We are waiting so we can enjoy just our time together, but we both agree we wouldn’t feel we missed out on the normal things 20something year olds do. We’re not into the stay up all night, stay out late, party scene. We’re old souls if you will 😛

@highschoolhoneys: as a couple we’ve been together for almost 4 years and have known each other for 8. We definately have agreed we want to enjoy just our time for a while which I think is DH’s main reason for waiting. In reality we’re most likely going to aim for some time in 2015.

@KsoontobeN: I thought I was an old soul, done with partying too. Then I turned 26 and the last 4 years of my life have been a blast. In my early 20s everyone was so stressful and everything was drama but once I hit my late 20s people calmed down enough to really be fun to hang out with. I couldn’t imagine having a kid right now. Soon, but not yet.

But you’ve gotta do what works best for you and your spouse. Nobody can tell you what is best for you because at the end of the day it’s you that has to live your life.