Practical Demonkeeping

In Christopher Moore's ingenious debut novel, we meet one of the most memorably mismatched pairs in the annals of literature. The good-looking one is one-hundred-year-old ex-seminarian and "roads" scholar Travis O'Hearn. The green one is Catch, a demon with a nasty habit of eating most of the people he meets.

Coyote Blue

With New York Times best-sellers like Bloodsucking Fiends to his credit, Christopher Moore has developed a devoted cult following. Coyote Blue introduces Samuel Hunter, a young man who's running from his past while being tormented by an ancient Crow God with a talent for mischief.

Island of the Sequined Love Nun

Take a wonderfully crazed excursion into the demented heart of a tropical paradise - a world of cargo cults, cannibals, mad scientists, ninjas, and talking fruit bats. Our bumbling hero is Tucker Case, a hopeless geek trapped in a cool guy's body, who makes a living as a pilot for the Mary Jean Cosmetics Corporation.

A Dirty Job

People start dropping dead around Charlie, giant ravens perch on his building, and it seems that everywhere he goes, a dark presence whispers to him from under the streets. Strange names start appearing on his nightstand notepad, and before he knows it, those people end up dead, too. Yup, it seems that Charlie Asher has been recruited for a new job, an unpleasant but utterly necessary one: Death.

Fluke: Or, I Know Why the Winged Whale Sings

Just why do humpback whales sing? That's the question that has marine behavioral biologist Nate Quinn and his crew poking, charting, recording, and photographing very big, wet, gray marine mammals - until the extraordinary day when a whale lifts its tail into the air to display a cryptic message spelled out in foot-high letters: Bite Me.

Fool

A man of infinite jest, Pocket has been Lear's cherished fool for years, from the time the king's grown daughters - selfish, scheming Goneril, sadistic but hot Regan, and sweet, loyal Cordelia - were mere girls. So he can see trouble brewing when Lear demands that his kids swear their undying love and devotion before a collection of assembled guests. Of course Goneril and Regan are only too happy to brownnose Dad.

Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more (except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdalan) and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.

Sacre Bleu: A Comedy d'Art

In July 1890, Vincent van Gogh went into a cornfield and shot himself. Or did he? Why would an artist at the height of his creative powers attempt to take his life... and then walk a mile to a doctor's house for help? Who was the crooked little "color man" Vincent had claimed was stalking him across France? And why had the painter recently become deathly afraid of a certain shade of blue? These are just a few of the questions confronting Vincent's friends who vow to discover the truth of van Gogh's untimely death.

Hell's Super: Circles in Hell, Book One

Steve is hell's super, its handyman. Being Mr. Fixit to the underworld keeps him and his assistant, Orson Welles (yes, that Orson Welles), pretty busy, since things go on the blink all the time down there. No malfunction has ever created so much inconvenience, though, as the malfunction of hell's escalator, which leads from the pearly gates to the depths of Hades. What's worse: The breakdown appears to be sabotage.

Monster Hunter International

Five days after Owen Zastava Pitt pushed his insufferable boss out of a 14th story window, he woke up in the hospital with a scarred face, an unbelievable memory, and a job offer. It turns out that monsters are real. All the things from myth, legend, and B-movies are out there, waiting in the shadows. Some of them are evil, and some are just hungry. Monster Hunter International is the premier eradication company in the business. And now Owen is their newest recruit.

Bill the Vampire, Scary Dead Things, The Mourning Woods, and Holier Than Thou: The Tome of Bill Series: Books 1-4

There are reasons we fear the dark. Bill Ryder...isn't one of them. Gamer, geek, and legendary vampire - The Tome of Bill is the tale of an unlikely hero trying to survive in a world of undead horrors. Despite awesome supernatural powers, loyal allies, and an attitude the size of Brooklyn, the odds are still stacked heavily against him. Bill Ryder must fulfill his destiny and save the world from the ancient terrors that threaten it - all while trying to work up the nerve to ask out the girl of his dreams.

We Are Legion (We Are Bob): Bobiverse, Book 1

Bob Johansson has just sold his software company and is looking forward to a life of leisure. There are places to go, books to read, and movies to watch. So it's a little unfair when he gets himself killed crossing the street. Bob wakes up a century later to find that corpsicles have been declared to be without rights, and he is now the property of the state. He has been uploaded into computer hardware and is slated to be the controlling AI in an interstellar probe looking for habitable planets.

An Unattractive Vampire

After three centuries trapped underground, thousand-year-old Yulric Bile, also known as The Cursed One, The Devil's Apprentice, He Who Worships the Slumbering Horrors, awakens only to find that no one believes he is a vampire. Apparently he's just too ugly. Modern vampires, he soon discovers, are pretty, weak, and, most disturbing of all, good.

The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant

Timid, socially awkward, and plagued by self-esteem issues, Fred has never been the adventurous sort. One fateful night - different from the night he died, which was more inconvenient than fateful - Fred reconnects with an old friend at his high school reunion. This rekindled relationship sets off a chain of events thrusting him right into the chaos of the parahuman world.

Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs: Half-Moon Hollow, Book 1

Maybe it was the Shenanigans gift certificate that put her over the edge. When children's librarian and self-professed nice girl Jane Jameson is fired by her beastly boss and handed $25 in potato skins instead of a severance check, she goes on a bender that's sure to become Half Moon Hollow legend. On her way home, she's mistaken for a deer, shot, and left for dead.

Nice Dragons Finish Last: Heartstrikers, Book 1

Audie Award, Fantasy, 2016. As the smallest dragon in the Heartstriker clan, Julius survives by a simple code: keep quiet, don't cause trouble, and stay out of the way of bigger dragons. But this meek behavior doesn't fly in a family of ambitious magical predators, and his mother, Bethesda the Heartstriker, has finally reached the end of her patience.

My Life as a White Trash Zombie

Teenage delinquent Angel Crawford lives with her redneck father in the swamps of southern Louisiana. She's a high school dropout, addicted to drugs and alcohol, and has a police record a mile long. But when she's made into a zombie after a car crash, her addictions disappear, except for her all-consuming need to stay "alive".

Critical Failures: Caverns and Creatures, Book 1

Tim and his friends find out the hard way that you shouldn't question the game master, and you shouldn't make fun of his cape. One minute, they're drinking away the dreariness of their lives, escaping into a fantasy game and laughing their asses off. The next minute, they're in a horse-drawn cart surrounded by soldiers pointing crossbows at them.

Villains Rule: The Shadow Master, Book 1

Hi, how are you? Yes, I am talking to you, the reader of this book's description. Okay, I get it, fourth-wall breaking is overdone. Get over it. This book, Villains Rule, is a fantasy action-comedy which you have to hear. Not because it redefines the genre, far from it. But rather for what it contains. A villain's tale. How often do you get to listen to a story where the villain is the protagonist? No, not an anti-hero, or a brooding monster, nor a hero thinly disguised as a villain. And not evil. If you want evil, take that nonsense to therapy.

Gil's All Fright Diner

Duke and Earl are just passing through Rockwood county in their pick-up truck when they stop at the Diner for a quick bite to eat. They aren't planning to stick around-until Loretta, the eatery's owner, offers them $100 to take care of her zombie problem. Given that Duke is a werewolf and Earl's a vampire, this looks right up their alley.But the shambling dead are just the tip of a particularly spiky iceberg.

Space Team: The Search for Splurt

Cal Carver, petty-criminal turned space adventurer, is on a suicide mission - and he really hates suicide missions. But this time it's to save his best buddy, Splurt, who has been taken prisoner by the elderly assassin, Lady Vajazzle, and the evil Zertex corporation. When they discover that the ship carrying Splurt never made it to Zertex, their search leads them through a wormhole to a mysterious planet unlike any they have seen before. Will they survive this strange new world and finally find their friend? And, more importantly, does he even want to be found?

Super Sales on Super Heroes

In a world full of super powers, Felix has a pretty crappy one. He has the ability to modify any item he owns. To upgrade anything. Sounds great on paper. Almost like a video game. Except that the amount of power it takes to actually change, modify, or upgrade anything worthwhile is beyond his abilities. With that in mind, Felix settled into a normal life. A normal job. His entire world changes when the city he lives in is taken over by a super villain. Becoming a country of one city. A city state.

Off to Be the Wizard

It's a simple story. Boy finds proof that reality is a computer program. Boy uses program to manipulate time and space. Boy gets in trouble. Boy flees back in time to Medieval England to live as a wizard while he tries to think of a way to fix things. Boy gets in more trouble. Oh, and boy meets girl at some point.

Jim &#34;The Impatient&#34; says:"IT WOULD BE IDYLLIC, IF NOT FOR THE CORPSES"

The Outsorcerer's Apprentice

A happy workforce is a productive workforce. At the moment, the Wizard's employees are neither. The goblins are upset with their working conditions, the dragonslayer has thrown a hissy fit over his medical insurance (or lack thereof) and everyone is upset about the terrible canteen coffee. Yet the Wizard hasn't got time to worry about revolution in the workplace - he's about to see his brilliant business plan (based on entrepreneurial flair and involving one or two parallel worlds) disrupted by a clueless young man.

Publisher's Summary

Christopher Moore is a New York Times best-selling author whose offbeat novels combine comedy and the supernatural.

A striking red-head, 20-something Jody is attacked and transformed into a vampire while walking home one night in downtown San Francisco. Befriending 19-year-old Tommy, Jody tries to understand her new undead life, but trouble finds her when the cops start suspecting Tommy of being a local bloodsucking serial killer.

OK, I know some of you don't want to "fall" for the humor, but if you'll let yourself go, this book is SO funny. NOT every book is a documentary. If all books were all true, we'd be....non-existent. Give it a try. So clever. So funny. Many laugh-out-loud moments, as many others have said. Very engaging, I listened to it all as quickly as feasible. Enjoyable, and will listen to the others in the same series soon. Narrator SUSAN BENNETT IS AWESOME, and should be booked for work her entire career! She MORE than made it great. Loved her, and she brought more mental visions with the words than expected.
Am I right, people that've heard this?
Loved it, and I listen to books ALL day long, and I love horror. Even though this wasn't scary per se, it dealt with those ideas, which were more than enough for a good time. You like funny? You like vampires? Get this book. DON'T expect Lestat. Though......

The fun of this book has been thoroughly reviewed, I think - so I will agree with all that has been said on that subject and give a but more credit where credit is due.

This narrator is absolutely incredible. I have listened to so many very talented narrators on audible, who bring a life to the book it may not have had from just reading it - those who make a great book even greater. Well, this narrator is right up there at the top! I often think, when I compare the performances on audible to many performances I have seen in film or television, that book narration is a magnet for the most talented, but lunder-recognized of actors... and this book proves it. Congrats to Susan Bennett for a brilliant performance! I hope she features in many books to come.

Ok, that said, let me reiterate that this book is loads of fun, very light hearted and moves quickly. The writer is a very witty person, and the humor is never flat, annoying or invasive, like in so many failed horror/humor stories featuring vampires or zombies... Really enjoyable stuff all around.

Funny, funny, funny. I normally don't get into humor books such as D. Adams and T. Prachett, but I love Moore. It is so hard to write a book and have something lol funny in every chapter, but Moore does it. The narration is perfect. The follow-up "You Suck" is also excellent.

I absolutely love Christopher Moore! He is my unsung literary hero and I feindishly gobble up every novel he has ever written and unpatiently await his next work of genious! Blood Sucking Fiends is the first of (so far) three Vampire novels staring Jodi & Tommy, your not so ordinary vampire couple. These novels are sexy, funny and encompass Moore's unending talent for bringing interesting characters that grow and develop and change as each story takes its turns and twists. I highly recommend this one for those of you who love the art of sarcasm and wit.

This book made me laugh out loud from start to finish. The trials and tribulations of a newly made vampire yuppie chic, who has no idea how to proceed. The many characters and situation are hilarious, made only more so for being set in San Francisco (where I live) with recognizable locations and dialogue that is as funny as it is plausable. Not to be missed if you like vampires - or laughing.

With the recent vampire craze lately, I was already apprehensive about ANOTHER vampire story. That was quickly put at ease within the first few chapters. Moore's satirical wit and uniquely flawed characters make for the best vamp book I've read since the Ann Rice series... but this is far more fun to read. I can't wait to start on the next one: You Suck!

I had listened to the sequel first _ You Suck, A Love Story without knowing about this book. I am so glad that Audible got it. I love both books. The offbeat humor which is trademark in Christopher Moore books kept me laughing. This is not your typical Vampire Book.

This book is typical Christopher Moore - meaning, very off the wall and very irreverent, but funny and entertaining. I listen to these on long road trips and am challenged when I need to stop and really just want to stay in the car and listen. Lots of fun.