YeeHaw:Back to the Future Texas Style

What if I told you the new frontrunner in the Republican Party for the office of President of the United States was a straight shooter, party hardy, hell yeah, good ol boy, vocabulary challenged, and imbecile of a Governor in the great state of Texas? You would probably say George W. Bush already had two terms and he cannot be a candidate again, and to that I would say, “He can if his name is Rick Perry.” That’s right folks; the Republicans have struck out with all their other candidates from the pretty girls Palin and Bachmann to the camera hungry Donald Trump that they have decided to go back with got them the office for eight years beginning back in 2000. This is actually no surprise since the Republicans seem to be the party for no new ideas. Why can they not find a candidate that actually has something to offer? The RNC needs to be on their knees begging someone like Colin Powell to run for office if they want their candidate to be taken seriously.

I am actually surprised Governor Perry has thrown his hat in the ring since it was not that long ago he wanted to secede from the union. Governor Perry boasts that he was not even aware America had been in a recession since business is so good in Texas. Well, one could say there is definitely no shortage of cheap labor in his state due to sharing a border with Mexico. Tricky Rick has also has been on record saying he opposes any type of wall or physical structure on the border, but prefers soldiers on foot armed with guns. I guess slowing down the volume of illegal workers would be bad for business in Texas. Although I may be incorrect in this assumption as to he just wants to shoot them as they cross, since he is such a proponent of the death penalty.

234 have been executed inTexassince Perry took the office of governor. In one particular case, a convicted man was executed with no real evidence according to two expert arson scientist’s testimony. The case had been appealed and became a public relations nightmare for the governor so he removed three individuals from the appeals panel and the very next day, the panel threw out the appeal due to what it called “flawed science”. The man was already dead, what harm would it have caused to allow the appeal to be heard other than making Governor Perry look bad if it came to the fact that an innocent man had been executed without just cause? I am definitely for the death penalty myself, but to execute without sufficient evidence, that’s a tough one for me to get behind. He was found guilty so life imprisonment would be more than enough, but I guess it is cheaper in the long run to just inject him and give his cell to some other deserving convict.

Perry also claims global warming is a hoax. This coming from a man whose state has seen record heat and drought this summer and has hosted prayer events asking citizens to pray for rain. Hey Rick, you think the big man upstairs might be sending you a subtle message to wake up and get on board with trying to protect the environment before it’s too late; before everything east of Austin ends up looking like the Sahara and everything west of Austin is under the Pacific. For the idiots who still say climate change is Al Gore’s imaginary friend, give me a break people, IT IS REAL. The weather phenomenons are too extreme for it not to be. That is another article in the making though, so enough about that.

And lastly, Rick Perry graduated from Texas A&M with a 2.22 GPA with a degree in Animal Science. 2.22 is just a little better than a C- average. He freely admits he could have never made it at either Texas Tech or the University of Texas due to his party behavior interfering. Heck, even George W. graduated from Yale and Harvard Business School while being a drunk. If President Bush is more intelligent than you, I don’t think America can afford or SURVIVE even four years under your watch especially since Dick Cheney is in no condition to make decisions for you.