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Yesterday, an astrologer friend of mine on Twitter was speculating about a serial killer’s birth chart and how it would make much more sense if his birth time was seven minutes later. I do that all the time. I’m quite skeptical about the birth information provided on sites like astrotheme.com, but I take what I can get. I’m very grateful to have a resource that strives to be accurate, even if I question the accuracy the site sometimes.

Anyway, Chelsea Handler’s birth time is listed as 6:35 PM. That puts both her moon in Virgo and her sun in Pisces right along the ascendant/descendant axis in her chart. Her natal moon is conjunct her ascendant within a degree from the twelfth house, and her natal sun is conjunct her descendant within a degree from the seventh house.

I’m not sure if I believe that the layout is correct. If she was born just four minutes later, her sun would be in the sixth house and everything else in her chart would be in the same positions. That would make more sense to me.

The reason that I believe that Chelsea Handler has a sixth-house sun is that she has made being a bitch her shtick. The sixth house is can be a bitchy, hypercritical place. It’s relationship to the sign of Virgo is amplified in this chart because both Handler’s moon and rising degree are in Virgo. Mercury, the ruler of the ascendant, is also in the sixth house, making my argument even stronger.

Now I don’t really believe that she’s such a bitch because I follow her on Twitter and I share a lot of her disgust for the current state of the US government. I also follow a lot of her collaborators from her television shows and they are truly delightful people who eagerly interact with their fans. I don’t believe that Chelsea Handler would really have those people in her life if she was as bitchy in real life as the character she plays on her talk shows. She even starred in a mockumentary called “After Lately” that parodied her persona.

I also don’t believe that she demonstrates the qualities of someone with a seventh-house sun. She doesn’t pair up as desperately as she should if the astrotheme.com chart is correct. I see some desperation in that layout. With the birth time four minutes later, a lot of that desperation is dissipated.

I’m pretty sure about this. Sure, half the planets in the sky are in delusional Pisces right now, but that doesn’t matter. The universe is telling me that I’m right.