Well, I'm glad for this small thing. I'm opting out and I am taking the cancer ray opt out letter with me and showing to the people around me at the airport on the 24th.

This is exciting! Tell us how it goes. I'm so inspired by that guy's experience- it sorta makes me wish I was flying so I could do it. Except for, you know, all this bullshiitake you have to deal with. Good luck!

Wait. Did I read this article correctly? They put their hands inside your underwear and pat you down inside of it?

the article wrote:

She felt along my waistline, moved behind me, then proceeded to feel both of my buttocks. She reached from behind in the middle of my buttocks towards my vagina area…

She then moved in front of my (sic) and touched the top and underneath portions of both of my breasts…

She then felt my inner thighs and my vagina area, touching both of my labia…

Doesn't sound like it's outside the underwear to me. But whatever. It's still intrusive and I totally get people not wanting to go through this.

I'm pretty sure it's outside, but you can still sexually assault a clothed person.

I didn't say anything about her calling it sexual assault, and I don't disagree! I asked because if someone was going to put their fingers directly on my vagina next week, I think it is even worse than if there is a minimal barrier. I wanted to be prepared.

Joined: Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:43 pmPosts: 2486Location: In some dumb hotel in an equally dumb town...or in San Diego

supercarrot wrote:

what i want to know is, though, do the fondlers have to change their gloves between passengers? i'd feel gross being violated after someone with a nasty STD was fondled. (yet another reason to wear a bulky pad.)

nope, new gloves per person...after they have felt ya they put the gloves in a little machine that tests for explosive chemical residue on the gloves (maybe drug stuff too?)

what i want to know is, though, do the fondlers have to change their gloves between passengers? i'd feel gross being violated after someone with a nasty STD was fondled. (yet another reason to wear a bulky pad.)

nope, new gloves per person...after they have felt ya they put the gloves in a little machine that tests for explosive chemical residue on the gloves (maybe drug stuff too?)

Joined: Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:43 pmPosts: 2486Location: In some dumb hotel in an equally dumb town...or in San Diego

i dont think they screen that much for drugs anymore, I have plenty of friends who bring shiitake on planes all the time, and I was real dumb one time and accidentally left stuff in my suitcase and they even went through it because i had a buttload of change in containers that had broken open...or maybe i was just lucky.

You were just lucky. I've seen dogs sniff out apples in bags from international flights.

True story: This lady standing next to me at the baggage claim had a security guy and a german shepherd sniff around her and they asked her to open her bag. Asked her all sorts of nerve-wracking questions like where she was staying in Pennsylvania, why, who she knew there, etc. It came down to the fact that she had once had an apple in her bag back in Amsterdam, but ate it before she got on the plane. I actually think the dog was smelling my bag because I'd packed apples, oranges, and bananas and didn't eat them all on the plane. He didn't come after me, but I went in the bathroom and disposed of them before going through customs. I felt really sneaky and dirty and bad about getting the old lady in trouble.

I got the full pat down when I flew while wearing a walking cast. If I'd have known how invasive it was I would've taken the boot off and hobbled through the metal detector on one foot. I was half expecting them to look in my asparagus with a flashlight. I truly wish I could summon up a fart on command because I would have. They also stuck one of those swab things that they use on your luggage up the cast. I'm not entirely sure what the swabs test for but I suppose they were making sure that my foot wasn't a bomb or drugs.

I truly wish I could summon up a fart on command because I would have. They also stuck one of those swab things that they use on your luggage up the cast. I'm not entirely sure what the swabs test for but I suppose they were making sure that my foot wasn't a bomb or drugs.

I wish you could have farted on them, too. And I'm glad your foot isn't a bomb or drugs. This is ridiculous. Sorry they got all up in your asparagus, that must have been horrible.

My embarrassing/terrifying amount of unsecured debt consists exclusively of non-money that I spent buying airplane tickets and traveling the world. I will be paying off said debt for probably ten years or more, and I do not care at all because being in a giant metal tube 35,000 feet in the air traveling 500MPH is awesome and fun and magical. NO MORE.

I can't possibly travel via air until this all goes away, even if that means never again. How many more ways can the terrorists win? It blows my mind that America is collectively shitting its pants while agreeing to be x-rayed and/or fondled by TSA agents in the name of "safety." Safety from what? All attempted terrorist attacks involving airplanes that have been foiled have been foiled mid-air, by passengers. Grabbing someone's junk or looking down their pants isn't going to stop them from doing what they want to do, it's just going to make them more inventive.

I have tickets to see every one of Dismemberment Plan's reunion shows on the east coast in January. Who wants 'em?