Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Ring out the old.

Well, here it is- New Years Eve. Again. It doesn't feel like it should be 2014 yet. It doesn't feel like a whole year has passed. But yet here we are. I really haven't put a lot of thought into it. I haven't celebrated New Years in a few years. With the exception of last year of course when Shylyn insisted that I stay up with her to watch New Years Rockin' Eve(it's just not the same with Ryan Seacrest), and bang pots and pans. I wasn't exactly into it, but she begged and sometimes I'm a fairly nice person. Sometimes.

Greg and his new gf (he claims they aren't "together", but I'm pretty sure we all know better, and he's just waiting for the divorce to come through) offered for me to go out with them tonight. Actually Kristi begged me, but I turned her down, because i've never really went out to "celebrate" New Years on it's eve. Why? Because people get drunk, loud, stupid and even dangerous. If I wanted to be in that situation I would just throw a family reunion. I thank her, but I just don't think it's for me. I've always had this idea of what it would look like when I went out on new years eve and it always involved me in a sparkly dress, hair curled, pea-coat, heels, champagne, red lipstick, and a handsome feller at midnight when the ball dropped. Very Gatsby-esque you might say.

Unfortunately since I don't foresee any of that, it will be a nice evening at home, perhaps with Netflix and left over pepperoni pizza. Don't feel bad for me, I like to do it like this. Thank you though. Like I was saying...here it is another year come and gone.

As we say goodbye to 2013 and hello to 2014 we are supposed to reflect on the past and look into the future. I reflect enough. People make their new years resolutions lists and talk about all of the things that will be different. I never do this, basically because no one ever sticks to their lists. They all give up by valentines day. But I decided to quit being such an ass this time and name a few little things that I need and/or want to do.

I'm not promising anything, I'm just saying it might be nice to see some of these things come to pass in 2014. I'm not calling it my resolutions list, I'm just calling it what it is. Will and can you remember to do all of this to make you happier, healthier, and better list. Got a nice ring to it, huh? Quit smoking, keep losing weight, remember to take your medicine everyday, go sandy-blonde, cut down on soda, fix that foot tattoo, wear your glasses, learn how to properly do your make-up instead of "winging it", start dressing more like in your head.

Silly huh? Oh well, at least I put in a little effort. So in conclusion thank you 2013, you brought some great things to us. Granted, some horrible things happened as well, but that's just a factor of life. Besides we got some great movies, some great (and terrible) music, eclectic news stories and I started a blog. No one saw this coming. No one saw Miley Cyrus ruining Blurred Lines at the VMAs, Miley Cyrus making a bunch of naked videos, her being dumb enough to break up with Hemsworth, basically anything Miley either, so I guess we're even. Touche' 2013. Touche'.

If you mustache me a question, go for it.

Chances are, I'm gonna show up in boots.

No doubt about it.

Tayder thinks I'm an embarrassing kind of mom.

I enjoy dressing in camo and wearing antlers.

I have a soft spot for gingers.

And I know everybody thinks their dog is the cutest.... but mine really is.

I was born on the 13th and tell people it was a Friday (it was really a Tuesday).

I love sharing "throwbacks" because they crack me up.

If it ain't Mario Bros on the Nintendo, I give up.

The only marathon I need or want.... like ever.

Sometimes I make random ass collages.... just because.

Remember being seventeen?!

Yeah, it wasn't as great as what you remember it being.

If Lizzy Caplan isn't one of your heroes, you should reevaluate that.

My family has just pretty much given up on me to stop saying f*ck.

They've also given up on trying to get me to wear "normal" pants.

I watch WAY too many true crime documentaries.

The first crush I ever remember having was on Christian Slater... followed by Bruce Campbell.

I have very strange travel destinations in mind.

Told you my hair and face was insane. (Also, booze).

Enjoy your time here.

I just wanted y'all to know that Charlie Kelly is my spirit animal.

If your picture is here.... my bad, homie.

IJTLFAT claims no credit for most of the images posted on this site unless they are blurry and sometimes in questionable taste cell phone pictures of random shit from my actual phone or they're from my past excursions..... something like that. Images on this blog are copyright to their respectful owners. If there is an image appearing on this blog that belongs to you and you do not wish for it appear on this sarcastic, but also sometimes serious blog, please email with a link to said image and it will be promptly removed. And before you even ask, yes, I'm really sorry about it.

If you've made it this far on my blog.... I commend you.

I should also probably apologize for my excessive use of the word f*ck, calling people bitch more often than not, and for talking about literally nothing to the point that it could melt brains. However, I apologize for none of it. BECAUSE I DO WHAT I WANT. Except for the picture notice that's above this. I totally meant that.