Billy Crystal brought up a point the other day. The Botox’d and beloved comedian blanched that gay sex scenes on TV sometimes push it “a little too far” for his tastes.

While some were quick to scream homophobe, one should understand that the man’s been schticking it up on the boob tube for literally 800 years and the TV times they are a-changin’ — from Lucy and Desi sleeping in separate twin beds to Patrick sweatily topping Kevin on Looking. Whereas straights have been pushing the boundaries of good taste for years, the gays are finally starting to catch up with shows like the aforementioned Looking, How to Get Away with Murder and Empire. (Gay sex is getting very realistic.)

We’re out of the closet and screwing on the kitchen table!

Here’s a celebration of some sex scenes that would make Billy Crystal — or anyone uncomfortable with two men going at it — clutch his pearls.

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44 Comments

Days (specifically the Gays of Days) was better (IMO) when Chandler Massey was playing Will. The guy currently playing the part of Will Horton, Guy Wilson? His face has the same pinched expression no matter what emotion he’s supposed to be expressing. That, and of course the writing has gotten just terrible. So why am I still watching?!

January 29, 2015 at 9:01am

Kieru

As a majority of these are from cable television series they seem like very poor examples. Cable has a much different set of rules than over-the-air networks. And really that’s the problem right there…

I would agree that over-the-air is becoming more ‘racy’ with their sex scenes. I don’t personally find it offensive, but then I understand that they are doing this to compete with Cable television which has a fewer rules governing what they can and cannot show.

January 29, 2015 at 10:01am

Anders69

Curious – why should it be assumed that these chosen scenes would make “…anyone uncomfortable with two men going at it…”? Also, why can’t verklempt Billy Crystal all the other “anyones”, just change the channel?

For myself, I am loving this breath of fresh air after having suffered through decades of only hetero relations being displayed. Keep ’em cumming!!

January 29, 2015 at 10:01am

Ladbrook

The whole Billy Crystal too-many-gays-having-too-much-gay-sex-on-tv thing reminds me a bit of what a closet [email protected] might have said back in the early 70’s when the networks started mainstreaming black actors into their primetime shows. Imagine if some Hollywood lib had said this:

“Yeah, I’m really soooooo happy that black folks can vote down south and stuff, but why do I have to see them on EVERY show? They’re everywhere! No one should have to see that. Enough!!!”

January 29, 2015 at 11:01am

Kieru

@Anders69: To be fair all Crystal said was that the scenes were ‘too much for me’. He never said it SHOULDN’T be on television or that the concept of two men was inappropriate for audiences in general. He said for him he prefers not to see ‘graphic’ sex acts on television.

He later clarified that this personal opinion applies to graphic sex acts between straight couples too. That may be a bit of backtracking on his part… but even his initial opinion was presented as a personal opinion on his own viewing preferences.

The media is, in my opinion, grossly misrepresenting his statement as a blanket attack against LGBT presence in modern television… which is a bit of a stretch.

January 29, 2015 at 11:01am

jwtraveler

@Anders69: If you examine the structure of the sentence, the phrase “or anyone uncomfortable with two men going at it” refers to people like Billy Crystal who are uncomfortable with seeing gay sex on TV. The writer is expressing the idea that Crystal and people like him would “clutch their pearls”, meaning, I infer, be shocked. That is the function of the dashes at both ends of the phrase in question.

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

jwtraveler

Clearly, the purpose of these gay sex scenes is to boost ratings. They appeal to gay male audiences, but also, I’ve heard, to many straight female viewers. While I would enjoy them (I don’t have cable, so I haven’t seen most of them), I feel that a lot of sex scenes on television are gratuitous and unnecessary, but that’s what show BUSINESS is about. The issue here is whether explicit gay and straight sex scenes should be treated differently. Billy Crystal implied that he believed they should be, while every gay person reading this site, presumably, would agree that they shouldn’t be.

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

davyboy

oh it’s gay sex on American TV.. How Boring!

Especially as two of them are British Remakes!

American tv is soo prudish.

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

Kangol

Did Crystal see that recent @ss-eating scene involving Alison Williams on Girls? That show has portrayed some of the most graphic sex I’ve seen in a while. Does that bother Crystal? Or just the gays going at it?

Thanks also for the clips from The Wire and Noah’s Arc. Those two shows, along with Oz and more recently, to some extent How to Get Away With Murder and Looking, show that LGBTQs of all colors have sex.

The scene where Adebisi tied down the nude young drug dealer Bodie in prison on Oz was one of the wildest I’ve seen on TV, though. The show even featured Adebisi running hand across that big, juicy bottom!

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

vive

@jwtraveler: “…a lot of sex scenes on television are gratuitous…”

Contradiction in terms. There is no such thing as a gratuitous sex scene. :)

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

NCSilverBear

One has to ask, if the sex were between two women, how offended would his senses be then? I’m just sayin’ . . .

January 29, 2015 at 2:01pm

jwtraveler

@vive: That’s your opinion. I have mine. I rarely see how an explicit sex scene is necessary to advance a plot. However, one could argue that “gratuitous and unnecessary” is redundant.
@NCSilverBear: Excellent point. I wonder why you don’t see more of those on TV. Apparently straight men LOVE them.

January 29, 2015 at 4:01pm

enlightenone

@Kieru: “…The media is, in my opinion, grossly misrepresenting his statement as a blanket attack against LGBT presence in modern television… which is a bit of a stretch.”

In all fairness, he never said that he had a problem with “LGBT presence in modern television!”

January 29, 2015 at 4:01pm

enlightenone

@jwtraveler: “…Billy Crystal implied that he believed they should be, while every gay person reading this site, presumably, would agree that they shouldn’t be.”

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!

January 29, 2015 at 4:01pm

enlightenone

@NCSilverBear: “…One has to ask, if the sex were between two women, how offended would his senses be then? I’m just sayin’.”

His nostrils might still be able to flair. Lol!

January 29, 2015 at 5:01pm

spiffy

I’m not a prude by any means; but I really don’t understand this obsession people have about wanting to see sex scenes on TV, gay or otherwise. They’re never long (pardon the pun) enough, and you don’t usually or ever see the genitals, so what’s the point? I have lots (and I mean LOTS) of gay porn to watch if I want to be aroused and titillated, and more.

And most of the actors are not that wild about doing sex scenes anyway — so unless the sex is absolutely crucial to telling the story, I totally don’t care.

January 29, 2015 at 5:01pm

SteveDenver

A couple of shows I am unfamiliar with, others are all subscription cable channels. Don’t f*cking subscribe if you don’t like it. Now… I have to find that TROJANS show.

January 29, 2015 at 6:01pm

Zekester

Most of these are not only on cable but on PAY channels. It’s hardly fair to that they are on “TV” as if they’re on network television the way heterosexual sex scene are, in the middle of the afternoon.

January 29, 2015 at 7:01pm

DuMaurier

I remember that scene from “Oz”. If anything about it made me “uncomfortable”, it was poor Brian Bloom getting his neck snapped at the climax of giving a BJ to Chris Meloni.

January 29, 2015 at 8:01pm

MarionPaige

As far as outrageous “in your face” male nudity in a gay context goes, it is hard for anything to match HBO’s idiot OZ. Similarly, HTGAWM has probably gone the furthest on network (non-cable tv). However,

One memorable gay scene on network tv was simply implied. On an old hospital show (St Elsewhere, I think), one of the doctors was trapped in a prison with a female nurse during a prison riot. When some of the rioting cons moved towards the Doctor and The Nurse, The Doctor just assumed that the cons intended to rape the female nurse and he said to the cons: “Don’t you touch her!”

One of the cons then said; “Don’t worry doc. We graduated from nurses a long time ago”.

And as far and comical butt sex goes. The Character Alex in the E4 (UK) Series Misfits had the power to take away people’s super powers by having sex with them. He butt sexes one guy on a bed to remove the devil from him. And, he has butt sex in mid-air with another guy to remove the guy’s ability to fly.

January 29, 2015 at 9:01pm

miguel

lmao @ Billy Crystal. I can see him watching HTGAWM, Looking, Oz, and True Blood, and going “Oh this is too much” while eating his popcorn staying glued to the tv. He’s a comedian, so I’m really not going to take negative statements from him too seriously. Besides, these shows are hot. Even daytime tv’s in on the gay sex. The hot scenes and these shows aren’t going anywhere. They’re here to stay.

January 29, 2015 at 9:01pm

martinbakman

Gone too far? Well….not too far for Queerts. Especially when most all of these actors are straight men.

January 30, 2015 at 1:01am

sejjo

@Kangol: “The scene where Adebisi tied down the nude young drug dealer Bodie in prison on Oz was one of the wildest I’ve seen on TV, though. The show even featured Adebisi running hand across that big, juicy bottom!”

What are you talking about? Adebisi was a rapist.

January 30, 2015 at 5:01am

jantheman4903

he is very old. i factor in him playing jodie, doing comic relief forever..and NOT having a history of this. can we sometimes not approve but also not go after? and this was about seeing fake sex scenes..not about being gay. or am i bein too easy on him? have a good day all.

January 30, 2015 at 6:01am

enlightenone

@jantheman4903: “…can we sometimes not approve but also not go after? and this was about seeing fake sex scenes..not about being gay. or am i bein too easy on him? have a good day all.”

“Old” for some is perceived as wise/know/right like parents to a child (a gay child)! This is the beginning for many children to go against their own nature.

If to “go after” means attack, I would say no, but need to challenge ignorance and asinine statements especially by someone held in high esteem or influence.

“Fake sex” is a representation of a natural human behavior whatever the sexual orientation/sexual identity.

Are you being “too easy on him?” Given what I have stated, you have food for thought to help you decide for yourself.

I personally don’t approve of his original decision to make this public statement and his lack of regard and sensitivity. If it is his personal and private belief, he has a right to it.

It’s good that you raised the question. Have a good day!

January 30, 2015 at 7:01am

gaym50ish

Even a man-on-man kiss on over-the-air TV brings out the idiots who say they don’t want their children “exposed to gay sex” on TV.

Funny, but even back when Lucy and Desi slept in twin beds, a kiss was just a kiss. It never became “sex” until two guys did it.

January 30, 2015 at 7:01am

enlightenone

@gaym50ish: “…Funny, but even back when Lucy and Desi slept in twin beds, a kiss was just a kiss. It never became “sex” until two guys did it.”

Touche! And even then there was a literal WARNING over weeks to heteroSEXuals (to protect their children – gay children exist yet) that there was going to be a KISS on the TV show “Dynasty” in the mid ’80’s.

January 30, 2015 at 8:01am

enlightenone

That would be “gay children DIDN’T exist yet…

January 30, 2015 at 8:01am

Kieru

@enlightenone: Yes… that’s exactly what I said; that he DIDN’T make that association, but the media is making it for him…

January 30, 2015 at 9:01am

mgkbus

on the frequency of sex scenes on tv, of any persuasion: Really? people still think that there is too much sex on tv or are y’all just kiddding me?

January 30, 2015 at 5:01pm

scotshot

@jwtraveler: Depicting torture, murder, bloody crime scenes, drug use, cigarette smoking, emotional abuse, men and women in sexy clothing – or out of it, etc. may all be classified as gratuitous. So what.

January 31, 2015 at 2:01am

coffeeaugur

The only reason they went too far for TV was because they depicted gay sex as normal. Had they added a deviant story line, the public would have ate it up.

January 31, 2015 at 2:01pm

enlightenone

@coffeeaugur: “…Had they added a deviant story line, the public would have ate it up.”

Didn’t even consider that angle! Thanks for your contribution to this post.

January 31, 2015 at 4:01pm

jwtraveler

@scotshot: Yes, and I think much of it is excessive, but I understand the reason for it. What’s your point?

January 31, 2015 at 3:01pm

Cee

The only scene that made me uncomfortable was the The Looking scene with Patrick topping Kevin.

January 31, 2015 at 9:01pm

enlightenone

@Cee: “The only scene that made me uncomfortable was the The Looking scene with Patrick topping Kevin.”

Curious, why so?

January 31, 2015 at 10:01pm

jantheman4903

@enlightenone: well you didn’t state..you gave an opinion, which was fed from my thoughts. and i certainly will feed from yours. but i was not looking for statements. that sounds presumptuous.

January 31, 2015 at 10:01pm

jantheman4903

@jantheman4903: and you twisted most all i said. no need to enlighten..am done with this thread…

January 31, 2015 at 10:01pm

dave lopes

@sejjo: Abedisi being a rapist does not take away from the scene’s sensuality or the young man’s beauty or Abedisi’s sexiness.

February 1, 2015 at 4:02pm

jmfyrebourne

Personally I don’t enjoy in-your-face sex on TV or in movies, whether it be gay or straight. It doesn’t further the story and exists solely to be provocative. You can indicate that two people had sex without showing the sweaty details. If you can see thrusting, or if it’s obvious that someone is getting head, it probably doesn’t need to be there. If I want to see scenes like this I’ll rent a porno.

April 8, 2015 at 11:04am

martinbakman

If “Too Far” means f3>cking awesome then I’m all in.

The Wire was the best. Miss ya Omar.

May 23, 2015 at 8:05pm

Maude

Patrick

I’m surprised this list doesn’t include Dante’s Cove, which was never shy about all kinds of full frontal and gay sex. Also, the American version of Queer as Folk is much, much “cleaner” than the original British version.