Category: Life

These are just a few examples of the everyday battles we face because of our completely opposite tastes! At times it can be quite frustrating, especially when I want to watch a film and he looks like he’d rather rub his face on a cheese grater. But in the long run, I think it’s good that we are so different. He may think I am stubborn and set in my ways (which I am), but the truth is I really value his opinion, and it often challenges me to re-evaluate my stand on things, even if it doesn’t always come across.

And I like to think that the same goes for him. I’ve seen a big difference in him since we’ve been together. for example, I’m a neat freak and hate a messy house, whereas he used to have a very ‘relaxed’ approach to housekeeping. But nowadays he probably does more housework than me. He’s always washing dishes and clothes! And I’ve also developed a more lenient approach to what I consider messy.

I remember an episode of Modern Family that was about whether people can change or not. When asked how much people could change, Mitchell replied “People are who they are, give or take 15 percent. That’s how much people can change if they really want to. Whether it is for themselves or for the people they love.” This always stuck with me. 15%. Is it a lot? Is it not enough? Is it realistic? I don’t know what your opinion is on the subject, but for me, I came to the conclusion that I would be happy to be 15% adaptable. It’s a good percentage to aim for! It’s high enough to see a difference, but not so much that you lose yourself in the process. And for the one I love, I will more than willingly try to get up to that 15% in order to make him happy, because I know he is willing to do the same for me. Sometimes I may fall short, but I really try.

And this mentality has worked out well for us when it comes to the tricky parts. But it’s funny because even though we have our differences, in other ways we are so in-sync. We have the same dark sense of humour. We often finish each others sentences. We have the same fashion sense and are always stealing each others clothes. And I can almost always tell what he’s thinking and he knows me really well too. These natural similarities are the reason we were so attracted to one another in the first place, and the differences only help to make these connections that much more special.

We may still argue about what takeout to get, and we are always on opposite sides during a celebrity argument, but in the end it doesn’t really matter. I love him because he is so different to me. It keeps me on my toes. And making up after a heated argument can be quite thrilling too!

To mark my return to the blogosphere earlier this month, I thought it would be nice to give Pink Suburbia a new look! Trim the hedges, hose down the drive and take down the Christmas lights so the neighbors stop complaining!

I’ve gone for a cleaner, simpler look and I’m really happy with the results… It’s so shiny and white (with a hint of pink!). To make it easier to find what you’re looking for I’ve added some new options to the menu bar – Now #ManCrushMonday has it’s own tab! (for all the boys and girls who like to get hot and bothered on a Monday!)

I’m very optimistic that this marks the start of a new era of my blog, and I’m looking forward to sharing some more of my internet ramblings with whoever is out there to read!

Fooled you there for a minute didn’t I!? If I see another ‘New Year, New Me’ post anywhere on this planet I think I will have a breakdown!

I know it’s the second day of FEBRUARY, but it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything and I just wanted to give a little life update before I (hopefully) return for good!

I’m a little late to the party, but I’ve always done things in my own time! So far, 2016 has been off to a great start. I wouldn’t say I have radically changed myself to coincide with any New Year’s resolutions, but I have made a few small changes that are having positive effects.

One of the biggest things happened last week. I achieved one of my ultimate life goals. As of last Thursday, I am now the proud owner of a FIAT 500! If you don’t understand how big a deal that is to me, refer to my ‘about me’ page. My husband and I are financially tied in for five years, but it’s been a very big milestone for us to buy a car together.

Speaking of my husband, he has a new job working in a shop that has been really good for him. Before he used to work in a busy cafe in London that was very emotionally and physically draining for him. But now he is closer to home and much happier within his environment. As the saying goes: Happy Wife, Happy Life (we need a ‘husband’ alternative for that!).

Things have been going so well for us at home that we have even decided to try and change up our diet and daily routine by including some more exercise and healthy eating. We did a cabbage soup detox last week, which was simply torturous. I think I’m going to boycott soup until 2017. But it was something that we did together which made it all worthwhile, and we were motivating one another for a change! Normally it’s a struggle for us to work out together or eat right but so far we’ve been really in sync.

Work has been very busy over the last few months (hence the prolonged absence), but I am determined to find time for myself and my hobbies. I’ve really missed writing my blog as well as reading other WordPress gems! The plan is to come back on a more regular basis now though, so fingers crossed for success.

That’s about all that’s been going on in quiet suburbia. Life has been carrying on as usual, mothers taking children to school, couples walking dogs to the park and my husband and I, driving around town in our shiny new car!

I’ve taken a little bit of a break from WordPress over the last couple of weeks. I was very busy with work and honestly wasn’t feeling very inspired.

This week I’ve started following some new blogs, and have just been quietly absorbing this lovely community, regaining my focus and admiring some wonderfully written works.

It’s made me evaluate what I want my blog to be about, and what I want to say. I think I’m going in the right direction, but I just need a little bit more discipline!

One of the things that I’ve enjoyed a lot and I think has been well received has been the Man Crush Monday. So this is something I’m going to continue to do frequently, and hopefully consistently!

Also, I like sharing personal experiences and advice. As one half of a gay couple I am always fascinated when I discover blogs with similar lifestyles and stories. Finding people who can share my aspirations, obstacles and milestones is always fun, and I hope to be more of a voice in that sense.

When I started, I had it in my mind that Pink Suburbia was going to be about my gay life in suburbia, and while it is still an ongoing theme, here I’m able to share my passions for film, television, entertainment, and most importantly, my husband.

With Pink Suburbia I’ve created a little online home for myself, on a gay-friendly street with the most fascinating neighbours. So if you’re reading this, it means I have another chance to welcome you to the neighbourhood! On Wednesdays we wear pink.

Little Mix released their new album just over two weeks ago, and there is one song that for me personally stands out above the rest.

On the deluxe edition of the album ‘Get Weird’, you will find a stunning little number, tucked away in the tail end of the collection. Secret Love Song, Pt II is a wonderful ballad about, well, a secret love.

On first listen, I picked up on the main themes of the song because of the heartbreaking lyrics:

You and I both have to hide on the outsideWhere I can’t be yours and you can’t be mine

Straight away, I felt a connection to the lyrics. It reminded me of the time before I came out. I had been with my boyfriend (now husband) for a few months. We were actually already living together! But still, I hadn’t admitted to a large part of my family that I was gay. At the time I was living far away from my mother & sister (who already knew), and I felt it was important not to rock the boat or let my religious family members know in case they didn’t react well.

It’s quite funny looking back now, because we were actually really good at sneaking around. My family helped me move into my new house, not even realising that I was moving in with my boyfriend! But as amusing as it is now, I remember it was actually really frustrating at times having to keep such a huge secret.

I had met the love of my life and I couldn’t even share it with my loved ones. We would go out, and I would always be looking over my shoulder, worrying someone would recognise me. I hesitantly held his hand in public, but I could never relax.

Eventually, I came out to everyone very publicly on Facebook. It was a massive relief, not to be afraid of showing affection to the man I loved. Most of my family didn’t react very well, and I lost contact with a lot of them over my relationship, but it was the best thing I’ve ever done. The freedom it gave me was incredible, and even though there was some negativity, I was mostly met with a loving response.

This song reminds me of how far I’ve come and the lengths I’ve gone through to prove that my love is something special. Unfortunately, there are still many people who have to live their lives in secret, afraid of being rejected, or even worse, killed for loving who they love.

I’m posting this song and my story because it really touched my heart, and I wanted anyone else out there who relates to this in some way to know that who you love shouldn’t have to be a secret, especially because you just can’t help it.

PS: Thank you Little Mix for such a great song and embracing it as an LGBT love anthem. ❤

Halloween may be over, but I’d like to share a short story about my horrific ordeal this year. No, I wasn’t chased down an alley by Ghostface, or possessed by evil spirits. Something much worse happened to me this Halloween… I had a dentist’s appointment!

The Electric Drill

I shut my eyes tightly, feeling a hot tear trickle down my face and onto his operating chair. The burning spotlight on my face was almost a distraction from his metallic tools, digging away into my open mouth. My toes curled and my body recoiled in agony, but I attempted to hide these inadvertent reactions. I can’t let him see the power he has over me. I will not let this monster feed of my pain and suffering. As my mouth filled up with the coppery taste of blood, he removed his caveman-like hands from my mouth. I thought it was over, that he’d finally gotten his fill from my torture and that I would be set free. Little did I know, things were about to get worse.

The momentary silence was abruptly cut short by a new sound. A sound that sent shivers down my spine and chilled me to the core. An electric drill. ‘This is it.’ I thought. ‘This is when my heart gives out. I don’t think I can take any more of this.’ As the drill sound draws nearer, I scrunch my eyes even tighter than before, and I feel my back spasm in anticipation. When the cold drill finally makes contact with my teeth the sound fills my entire head. It sends my ears ringing into surround sound and I can’t even hear my thoughts anymore. I feel my tears mix with the newly formed cold sweat seeping from my face.

The experience is so completely consuming, I have to concentrate on my senses to be able to feel them. Though my eyes are shut, I am desperate to open them, to look into my attackers eyes and beg him to stop. My tongue is overpowered by the taste of blood, a metallic taste that is so distinct, there is no denying its presence. The smell from the room is so surgical and medical, it makes me feel cold and inhuman. My eardrums are trembling with every movement he makes within my mouth, which is now dry and cracking from being open for so long.

Just as I am starting to give up hope, and giving into the sickening feeling that this torture will never end, the drill stops. I don’t feel anything in my mouth anymore, just the sharp reminder of bruised and swelling gums, in an almost unrecognizably fragile state. I cautiously run my tongue along my teeth, counting them. By some miracle they all appear to be intact. I hesitate opening my eyes, allowing them to adjust to the brightness and refocus after being in complete darkness for so long. As the shapes around the room start to become clear, I see him, standing over me, with a mask covering his mouth, but his eyes penetrating mine.

Finally, I feel a surge of relief. It’s over. I’ve survived his twisted and crude torment. He’s going to let me go. But before I’m able to move or say anything, he pulls the surgical mask down and says, ‘We’re done now. See you again in three months’.

The End

Ok, so a routine cleaning at the dentist may not seem like such a scary thing for most, but I’ve always had a horrible fear of dentists. I never feel so vulnerable or exposed as I do when I go to see my dentist (who is lovely by the way and nothing like the monster in this story!). I made the mistake of booking an appointment on October 31st without realising what day it was, and then spent the whole time worrying that I would somehow end up a bloody, toothless ghost or zombie.

Luckily that wasn’t the case, and I was able to eat lots of junk food, drink and enjoy Halloween! I hope everyone else had a good Halloween too!

As I’ve mentioned before, I had a bit of a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I’m 25. I know it’s not old by any means, I just wished that I had my life a bit more together. After almost two months of it though, I’ve come to accept it, even embrace where I am right now.

Of course things could probably be better. Let’s just agree that life, in general, could always be better! But overall, I know things could be much worse too. I remember an episode of Will & Grace where they take a quiz called ‘The Five Pillars of Happiness’ to determine just how content and fulfilled their lives are. Even though it is difficult to summarize our existent into 5 categories, it’s a good place to start!

Health

Oh dear… Just going right into it aren’t we? In all honesty, I think health is one of the pillars that needs some reinforcement. I’m not obese, and I don’t suffer from any conditions that I’m aware of, but I know this is an area for improvement. I recently found out my blood pressure is higher than I expected, and I think I’m a little bit overweight at the moment, but it all comes down to my sedentary lifestyle. I work in an office, drive everywhere and partake in very little physical exercise. This is something I’ve started working on, so I’m not going to stress too much about it. That’ll just make my blood pressure worse!

Family

Phew, an easy one! Luckily for me, I have been blessed with a wonderful family. We’ve always been very close, but with my father passing away six years ago, we’ve really come together and learnt to appreciate one another and not take anyone for granted. It’s little, and broken, but still good. Yeah, still good.

Love

Another one that I feel content with. Love and marriage has definitely changed me! As important as it is to take care of yourself and your own heart, it means a lot when someone trusts you to take care of theirs.

Friendships

Another area that I could probably dedicate a bit more time to. I have one or two very close friends, and I hang out a lot with my husband and my sister, but in general I could probably make more of an effort to see my friends and spend time with them. With most of my friends we can just pick up where we left off, which makes it easier. Also, I am still relatively new to the blogging world, so I’m still getting to know everyone, although I’ve already met some lovely people.

Work

This was always the one that I had the hardest time with. Not because I’ve had terrible jobs or anything, just because I’ve always felt like I should be on some kind of career ladder. Going from promotion to promotion, pay rise to pay rise. However, it’s simply not been the case. Now that I’ve accepted this, I feel much better about my career path. I’m working hard, pushing myself and getting recognized for it. And this is already opening doors of opportunity for me, more so than before when I was worried about the money or the title.

Result?

3/4 out of 5 pillars. Not bad… If they are only metaphorical pillars that are not necessary to hold anything up!

The point is, we are always going to have something to work towards. It’s hard to build up all of these aspects of life at the same time without the occasional crack. The important thing for me is to have a strong foundation if it starts to crumble. Whereas before I wanted to see how high my pillars could reach, now I’m more focused on how much they can withstand.