"He would force me to do physical exercises such as 100 sit-ups. He would not allow me to wear clothes in the house for days at a time."

The relationship finally ended when the man rang his wife at work and demanded she return home to clean the stove. When she refused he told her not to bother coming home at all.

The father has not seen his children, aged 6 and 4, since December 2010, failing to attend for supervised contact visits or phone contact. But he asked the court to order that they both live with him. The court heard he suffered from depression and anxiety, which a doctor said made him incapable of looking after the children.

Federal magistrate Norah Hartnett said the father was entirely self-obsessed and had no insight into the care of the children or the impact of his behaviour on them.

"He is unable to contain himself and it is not in the children's best interests to spend any time with him," she said.

"The evidence ... is overwhelming and the children need to be protected from the psychological harm and family violence that the father represents."

Ms Hartnett ordered the children live with their mother and made no orders for contact with their father.

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