a dark past: Nakita's tale

Colleen’s journey with Nakita began as an uphill battle on the side of a slope that had an incline rising sharply away from her with massive odds stacked against her and boulders rolling towards her. When Michael revealed her full background, this fact became as obvious as her past was disturbing. Nakita had been rescued from a puppy mill operation. Her good looks, excellent breed conformation and fine fur had caused her to be singled out at birth to become a breeding machine. From the earliest age, she had been mated with other Huskies. She apparently had strong genes, resulting in a knack for producing pure white, blue eyed offspring. These were in great demand amongst those who were more fashion conscious of their dog’s looks, or had a stereo-typed belief about what a Husky ‘should’ look like. Therefore, they also attracted a premium price from buyers. Nakita was a very good revenue earner. The price she paid for this was high. To be a malleable resource for the owner, she was needed to be highly submissive and non-confrontational. She lived in a kennel (although the term should be used loosely, since it was little more than a very poor wooden shed) at the back of the owner’s land, a long way from their house so that the occupants would not be disturbed by any noise she might make. There was a twelve by six foot run attached to it. There she remained for four years without being allowed out. She was visited only at feeding time and when mates were brought to her. She had no company, no-one to play with, no-one to take her for walks. Her puppies would be taken from her at eight weeks and she was expected to breed again as soon as she came back into season. Eventually she had enough and turned on the unwanted mate that was forced upon her. He received the full force of her pent up anguish with this agonising existence, and he was badly injured in the process. ‘The worm had turned’. After this episode, the mill-owner (I will not dignify him by calling him a breeder) realized that she was now damaged goods and could not be used for further breeding. So rather than attempt to rehome her, where her less than usual personality would be recognized and likely render her unadoptable, she was left to starve. Without any apparent reason, and having known of this operation for many years, a neighbour suddenly decided to alert animal welfare and the mill was raided. I have no doubt that he was led to do this by those in the etheric who watched over one of their own. Although she had been liberated, by now Nakita was at death’s door. The vet recommended that her miserable existence be terminated and so she was put on to the perpetually full roster of those awaiting their unhappy departure from this life at the end of a needle. In another unlikely twist of fate, Helena just happened to visit the pound to which Nakita had been taken. She saw beyond the terrified eyes and ravaged body and her heart went out to the emaciated dog. She begged to be allowed to take her and the dog pound was only too grateful to be able to save themselves a few dollars from their over-stretched budget by not having to administer the fatal dose of liquid death. After months of rehabilitation with Helena, Nakita had been nursed back to fine physical health, but could still only be described as a shell of a Husky. Her spirit was broken. She would lie listlessly, shunning all contact with the other dogs and only responding to the love Helena showed her for the briefest of moments. The breed is an immensely resilient one that is capable of enduring tremendous hardships of a physical nature. But here was a dog that had suffered psychologically. Ultimately Helena recognized that any progress that she might make from this point onwards required a different environment, away from dog runs and in the midst of a home where she could be lavished with attention around the clock. Only then might she begin to forgive what had been done to her. When we discussed her, Helena pulled no punches in revealing what a difficult proposition Nakita presented. She would not consider anyone who offered a less than ideal home for this battered soul. Colleen was an easy sell. Amidst a lifetime of helping others, she had actually run a nursing home for the psychologically damaged. If anyone could understand the dog, it would be Colleen. In return, when describing the dog to Colleen, her issues were like water off a duck’s back and she was not deterred one iota. All she saw was a soul that needed to be reached out to and an etheric being that had been there for a purpose. So our friend had now taken an emotionally scarred being into her world. Her extreme shyness and apparent fear of everything around her continued, even despite the gentle and loving treatment she received from her new mistress. She would choose to spend long hours in a room apart from Colleen, alone with the demons that haunted her, never daring to venture out and experience the new home that surrounded her. It was weeks before she would leave one room and go to another of her own volition. Even the walks that provide such excitement for most dogs were something of a difficult chore. Nakita would show some initial enthusiasm, but once she had left the confines of the house she would experience panic attacks and try to drag Colleen homeward as soon as possible. If they encountered other people, this would set the dog off even worse. It was almost as if the contrast with the confined quarters that she had spent so many years within had left her with a form of agoraphobia. It has to be said that in all of this, Colleen’s behaviour bordered on the saintly. At times it seemed that for every two steps forward, Nakita would take twelve backwards. Yet Colleen accepted her new dog for what she was and where she was, encouraging her with unending patience and tolerance. From an outsider’s perspective it may have looked like the dog was an unrewarding one to own. But all Colleen saw was a being that needed patience and help. Not once did her resolve waiver. Not once did she have any regret about the choice she had made. Because she is a close friend, we received weekly updates from Colleen on Nakita’s progress. Basically there were very few that revealed any headway being made. It was many weeks before we got an excited phone call to let us know that Nakita had finally decided to experiment with visiting a different room in the house. An even more excited one sometime thereafter let us know that the dog had actually greeted Colleen upon her return from shopping. It was a tiny step, but above all else, it represented a major triumph for Nakita and Colleen was thrilled for her. Anyone who adopts a rescue dog at some point reflects upon what their new charge has lived through and hopes that they are now totally happy. So it came as no surprise when Colleen requested some information about Nakita’s past; and more specifically, what her purpose had been as an avatar. Had she fulfilled it? Beyond the circumstances of the scenario that had required the rescue, we knew little of her day-to-day life and treatment. Michael, on the other hand, knew quite a lot. But Colleen soon wished she hadn’t asked. As a major part of the mill owner’s initiative to instil Nakita with the qualities that would make his life easy, from the earliest moments of her puppy life, she was shown no kindness. What physical contact she was offered was brutish. Within days she had learned that to approach a human could result in a stinging reproach. Quickly, she understood that she need not fear abuse if she just did nothing when in the proximity of humans. Whereas most pets learn and respond to a name, Nakita was simply not spoken to. The exception to this rule was that if she looked in the direction of a human, she would receive a harsh rebuke. Relief might have come when the owner decided to put his young son in charge of taking the dog its food; after all, children love puppies, don’t they? Michael did not describe the boy in any way, but he did describe his actions. He used the word “monstrous”. The child took perverse pleasure in grabbing the puppy by the scruff of the neck and twisting the fur until she was at the point of choking. Her paws and leg joints became targets for unnatural manipulations. He would force her neck over the side of his arm, almost to the point of snapping the vertebrae and if she resisted, the treatment was accompanied by blows to the head and body. On more than one occasion she was physically thrown across the cage. Finally, after months of systematic torture, the father was alerted by the pitiful yelping noises made by the dog and caught the boy in the act. He was severely punished, not because of the hurt he was inflicting on the poor defenseless creature, but because there was a risk that he might damage the future breeding machine. Ironically, the beating the boy received probably saved Nakita’s life, but it did not end the abuse. Thereafter, the child became more adept at inflicting his tortures upon the animal in a way that hurt, but would not actually break anything. When she cried out, her muzzle was slapped. Hard. Gradually, she learned not to cry out and take her punishment. On one occasion whilst she was receiving the harshest of treatment and the most severe of physical abuse, she dared to look plaintively into the boy’s eyes in the hope of sparking compassion at some level or another. Instead she was met with cold reproach and showered with a tirade of abuse and violence. It was a fateful moment for both of them. She had fulfilled her purpose and he, beyond his wildest imagination, had reached a crossroads in his life.What was Nakita’s purpose? As we go through our lives and follow our uniquely individual learning paths, we all do good and bad. This is the way it is meant to be, for how can we understand one without the other? Through our experience and learning we are meant to apply our discernment in recognising that which is for our highest good, and make life choices accordingly. Some learning is easy. Some is difficult. Occasionally we get caught up in beliefs that become cyclical for us. We miss learning opportunities that then loop and revisit us on multiple occasions within any one lifetime; and if we still don’t get it, between different lifetimes as well. Usually when this occurs, the magnitude of the lesson expands exponentially so that we cannot miss it (although we may still choose not to apply our learning). These are the lessons described as ‘dogmas’ in the previous chapter. This boy was caught up in just such a dogma. To explain briefly and simply: over the course of many lifetimes he had struggled with the (not uncommon) belief in the supremacy of his state of being over others. Whilst I was not allowed to see his previous lifetimes, Michael explained that they had usually involved acts of cruelty and particular contempt for the natural world and creatures therein. He explained that such an experience of life was absolutely valid, and that although I might find it abhorrent, many have this pathway to follow. He also counselled that all overcome it, eventually. However, this particular individual had gone through so many iterations of this state of being that he needed a more than usual amount of assistance in order to break free of the constant loop he had gotten into. And since the impact required to do this was very high, he would now go through a lifetime of relatively extreme experience. As a way of assisting him in breaking free and coming to terms with the challenge of himself, he elected to meet with a ‘signpost’ at an early stage of his life. This would provide him with a chance to experience an awakening and overcome the learning need. The signpost would come in the form of a pet, a creature that would evoke all of his issues. In theory, any creature would ‘do’ to serve this purpose, and many ‘normal’ dogs do undertake similar roles with their owners, albeit for those with less severe learning needs; or even for the sake of their own experience. However, of key importance in this situation was what would emanate from the dog at the very moment when the lesson was to be presented to the learner. It must reflect a higher state of being that prompted recognition in the observer. The boy needed, in that moment, to be touched by an understanding of what he consistently failed to grasp: that in hurting something else, he hurt himself. In an instant, he needed a vital reminder of his own etheric origin and to extend his consciousness outside of his limited third dimensional reality. All of this could not be conveyed by a ‘normal’ dog, since the essence of their being is as an incarnate form. So an angel was required and Nakita, acting out of pure love and in full knowledge of what would transpire, volunteered. The opportunity to gain learning extends across a lifetime. The opportunity to apply that learning is decided upon in moments. So brief are these moments that we may not even be conscious of our opportunity to exercise our discernment. Yet the choices made in the instant of the moment may reverberate in their impact across our whole lifetime. An avatar may live a lifetime with a purpose that lasts throughout, or merely for a moment that may occur at any point in that lifetime. For Nakita, the desperate plea for pity conveyed by her pained eyes was that moment. Her beseeching look delivered the awakening message, clearly and directly from the etheric. In that almost imperceptible instant, the boy was reacquainted with lifetimes of learning and presented with a blinding glimpse of the meaning of the moment. Then he was given a simple choice: Stop what you are doing, for your own sake. Or continue. From an adult perspective, and in the light of the consequences which you as an observer may be fully able to comprehend, the choice, in its implication, may appear to be of great magnitude. Was it therefore beyond the mind of a child? When I asked Michael about this he explained that an infant may be ignorant of the ways of the world they will come to grow up in; but in so many other ways, a child’s discernment may be far more sophisticated than an adult. Consider that as yet, they have not learned to encumber their thought processes with concerns of political correctness, vested interest or self-deception. More importantly, the learning and knowledge that has been gleaned in previous lifetimes (and contained in their soul DNA) is actually much more accessible. Choices are more easily made because their points of reference in making them are far purer in their nature. Therefore, a child acts more with their hearts than their heads. This choice was well within the boy’s powers of understanding. Yet still he chose to ignore the guidance that spoke within him and the violence recommenced. I asked Michael if it would be possible for the child to undergo some kind of epiphany later in his life? The answer was a “yes” delivered with very little conviction. When I queried this, he commented that direct intervention had been given from the etheric only because of his pre-existing difficulty with acting upon a piece of learning he already possessed. And only in the most extreme cases of need would this be permitted. Once the intervention had been made, never again in this lifetime would he be the recipient of such mighty assistance from the etheric. Instead, he consigned himself to a further series of repetitions and a ramping up of the extremity with which the learning point would be presented to him. Unfortunately, it would be without a corresponding increase of ease with which the learning would be made obvious to him. Michael went on to explain that lifetimes in which we fail to apply discernment, when we have already understood the learning points that allow us to make effective choices, may more deeply engrain inappropriate choices and actions. This also provides an explanation of why so many lifetimes are lived within the mid-term soul range. I was left in two minds by the explanation. On the one hand, I was deeply saddened that the result of Nakita’s suffering amounted to nothing. But I realized that my concern was for her. If I revisited the horrendous unkindness of the boy, I struggled to find any empathy with him. Michael, on the other hand, was much more philosophical. I was awed by his ability to regard the situation without judgement of the boy. He reminded me that those in the etheric simply see the souls of the individuals in their true higher self form. Even though the actions affected one of his own kind, the actions themselves were deemed inconsequential. He was supremely accepting of what had come to pass. He was also absolutely confident that the child would eventually ‘get it’, however long it took. And I was once more reminded that time in the etheric has very little meaning. Ultimately, from a totally third dimensional perspective, I fear for the adult the boy may now become; for all our sakes. Pleasure in abusing animals, when observed in children, seems to be taken as a portent of much darker things to come. This child was only ten years old. It was at this moment in her life that Nakita first came into season. This natural biological process committed her to a further form of brutalisation, but saved her from another. Now that the dog was able to be productive, the father would take care of her, exclusively, to protect his investment. The key to her cage remained in his pocket and from that point onward, the boy was only allowed to sneer through the fencing wire, his abuse now verbal. And so it is that even now, if she encounters children, Nakita experiences the wildest panic of all. Her apparent terror will not abate until some considerable time after the offending youngster has been left far behind. To add to the problem, Nakita has luxuriant white fur and a cuddly polar bear like quality about her. She is large and powerful with blue eyes, very attractive and she looks very approachable. All in all, she’s a recipe for a child magnet. Therefore, it is a source of some sadness for Colleen that she constantly has to keep a look out for children or move the dog away from eager little hands when they inevitably seek to connect with her. There is no risk to the kids as Nakita is quite harmless. It is the canine that would be traumatized. At least we now know why. They say that time is a great healer, but nobody ever specifies how much time is required, or in what proportions to the time that has caused the hurt in the first place. So it made sense to us to assume that if it was going to happen at all, Nakita’s road to recovery was a (unspecified) matter of time. Over the months that followed, we would see her at regular intervals and we were delighted when she overcame her fear of being with our pack. Gradually she accepted that the harm that had been inflicted upon her was not from her own kind, although I can only imagine that she must have viewed her enforced and oft repeated matings as a form of rape. I was relieved that she perceived no threat from our dogs. About a year after the dog’s arrival, Colleen decided that she and Nakita would join us on one of our hikes to the Plain Of Six Glaciers, the site of Archangel Michael’s retreat at Lake Louise. Since this has the effect of awakening in avatars at least a modicum of knowledge of what they truly are, we were very pleased that this would be happening. To facilitate the process, I run energy through them whilst in the midst of channelling, and it can produce some spectacular effects. On this hike, the channelling for the group as a whole had been quite extensive and I had not realized that Colleen had an appointment in the evening and needed to return to her car much sooner than everyone else. As she was bidding farewell to all, Sharon reminded me that I needed to ‘infuse’ Nakita; so in a somewhat rushed fashion, I bent over her and began the process. Since I do this with my eyes closed, I will leave it to Sharon's account of what happened next. “When it began, Nakita stood very still. Then all of a sudden we all got a sense that something powerful was entering into her third dimensional body. She stiffened slightly and looked about her, trying to see where the energy was coming from, but she didn’t resist. She actually seemed to be enjoying it. Then all at once her eyes and the expression on her face changed. It was as if she was overwhelmed with a sense of peace and calm. If she’d have been human, you’d have heard a long and satisfied sigh of relief.” For my part, I sensed the flow of etheric energy into her as if it was a ball of electricity that passed from my hands to her body. I could feel it coursing around her frame and her fur seemed to stand up. This would correspond with her stiffening. With my eyes closed, I suddenly saw a blast of brilliant white light as if what had gone within her had now permeated every individual hair of her coat and burst out of her. Her whole body then relaxed, and this is Sharon's ‘sighing’ point. When I opened my eyes, she turned her head slightly and made momentary eye contact. “OK, I get that.” Colleen herself was absorbed with the need to get home. It was her daughter’s thirtieth birthday and she could not be late for the large celebration that was planned for that evening. So it took her a while before she started to notice the full force of the effects upon her dog. Over the course of the coming weeks, Nakita took on a new and much higher level of confidence. She walked out with Colleen in comfort, clearly finding enjoyment in sharing time with her owner and not worrying about those things that went on around her. And when she visited our house, she was perfectly happy to come indoors and rest comfortably, even amidst the madness that our pack can create. Even better from my perspective, when I approached her, she let me fuss with her and smother her with affection. And she licked me! What an honour. However, Nakita was not yet out of the woods and our understanding of her and the lessons associated with her state of being were still unfolding.