Elisabeth Moss files for divorce. Jailbound Lindsay Lohan gets a facial. Michael Jackson's kids will take the stand to discuss his drug use. Tuesday gossip puts its best face and worst faith forward.

Did Scientology drive Elisabeth Moss and Fred Armisen apart? Elisabeth filed for divorce yesterday, and though many point to Fred's suspiciously quick rebound with fellow SNL star Abby Elliot (who is half his age) Fred's friends say Elisabeth's dedication to Scientology is the real culprit: "Her religion was as important to her as their marriage, if not more. He could not get with it." [Us, image via Getty]

Good news: Lindsay Lohan won an unspecified settlement from E*Trade for that bizarre "milkaholic Lindsay" kerfuffle. Bad news: Turns out she failed not one but two drug tests, one for cocaine and one for amphetamines. A bench warrant has been issued for her arrest. [Us, Us]

Meanwhile, LiLo went to get a facial yesterday. Gotta look good for the judge. [Radar]

Michaele Salahi won't be returning to Real Housewives of D.C. May this scourge of Salahis end quickly. [P6]

"Model Maggie Rizer gets a happy ending": Apparently her stepfather gambled away all her modeling money, but now she's married an heir to the IBM fortune. Phew. [P6]

Kerry Washington went to a film festival screening and got ID'd. "You can IMDB me," she said. She got in. [P6]

Michael Jackson's children will be called to testify at the involuntary manslaughter trial of Conrad Murray, the doctor believed to have delivered Jacko's fatal dose of sedatives. Apparently Paris and Prince are being called as defense witnesses, and will be questioned about their father's drug use. Sounds juicy! And, you know, traumatizing. [Radar]

Every time I see a boldfaced item about Kristin Davis I briefly think it will be about the Sex and the City actress. But, nope, it's always about the Spitzer madam-turned-politician. This week she's been emailing sexy photos of herself to newspaper that use less-than-flattering pics. [P6]

Playboy playmate Karissa Shannon's sex tape features a riding crop, a dog collar, chains, bubble bath, and the kind of high-quality cinematography that doesn't even bother pretending it wasn't intended for DVD release. Starlets should really just admit they're doing this on purpose. Did we learn nothing from Montana Fishburne? [TMZ]

Shia LaBeouf doesn't recycle. "I'm horrible, horrible, horrible...Sometimes I put the can in the right bin, sometimes I don't." Everyone has their crosses to bear. [ShowBizSpy]