Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. (Part 1)

I know what several of you are thinking. “WTF is he jabbering on about?! Just play the game already!”

I’m getting to that, but there’s one final step before I begin my excursions, which I’m going to explain right now.

Years ago I read of a study done where people were given games to play. Some people had avatars that were considered “ugly” and the others were given “attractive” ones.

The study concluded that the subjects given the attractive avatars were more extroverted and confident in the game than their “ugly” counterparts. Not only that, but these behaviors persisted outside the game as well.

I
bring this up because this is what I see when I log into Eve:

I must have drank 8 pints of What-The-Fuck ale before I created this thing. I actually wince when log in and see it.

Let’s
analyze, shall we?

My hair looks like it was drawn by a lazy manga artist drunk on sake. For some reason I chose a pockmarked face. (with all due respect to Robert Davi). And the pose… I’m sitting there with my left shoulder facing forward. You can almost imagine my hand on my knee while sitting on the toilet trying to force a bowel movement when constipated.

Somehow, I managed to get cockeyed eyes as well. Now, I know there isn’t a “cockeyed” setting in the character creation, so I’m not sure how I wound up with that.

If Mel Brooks taught us anything, cross eyed people make for terrible marksman

Now lets have a gander at those clothes.

Look at that jacket. Maybe I thought it looked sort of Han Solo smuggler-ish at the time, but I definitely don’t think so anymore. Now I think it should be burned with fire.

My pants look like they have compartments that are partially inflated. I guess that’s good if you’re deep sea diving and need buoyancy, but it serves no purpose in the game.

In the next post you’ll see me undo this partial birth abortion that is my current avatar into a lean, mean, sleeper slaying, ‘rat killing machine. Well… at least an avatar that looks like one.