The Onion wasn't the first. One of the stated objectives of al Quaeda in staging the 9/11 attacks was to draw the U.S. into a Middle Eastern war that would provoke the various peoples of the Islamic world into unifying under a new Caliphate. IIRC they expected that, even if the various states in the region wouldn't voluntarily band together, it would destabilize the region so radicals would have an opportunity to take advantage of the resultant chaos to impose the Caliphate by force.

"Rather, the Secretary contends that the existing administrative procedures, detailed below, provide all the process that is constitutionally due before a recipient can be deprived of that interest..." Clearly, I'll be laying her so hard she'll have to apply for Social Security disability benefits after.