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As the title I’ve given this Nurse Jackie recap suggests, this episode is all about heroes. As the title Showtime has given this episode suggests, it’s all about sewer-dwelling rodents munching on delicious snack food. As much as I love me some Cheetos, let’s go with heroes.

The repentant hero: Antoinette
Despite being fired at the end of episode 6 for calling Jackie out and telling her to lose Frank (because he knows Jackie is using again and is looking the other way), Antoinette is waiting for Jackie at All Saints to confront her about getting help. Jackie is pissed and immediately starts defending herself. She’s a functioning addict, for crying out loud. She’s in a great relationship! She’s a great nurse! Her life is f**king great! Antoinette doesn’t care. She tells Jackie she’s not going anywhere because she, herself, has relapsed many times. In fact, it took killing her husband in a car accident (while high) to finally make it count. Well, that’s sobering. But really. Then Antoinette tells Jackie something that earns her my “hero” designation: “Wake the fuck up, Jackie. You can fool your kids, you can fool Frank, you can fool yourself, but you ain’t fooling me. And when you crash, I’m gonna be there for you.” Repentant? Sure, but let’s add “loyal” and “kick-ass” to that distinction, too.

Shockingly, Antoinette’s tragic story and speech seem to strike something in Jackie as well, because she hands over her baggies (“This is everything I have”) and tells Antoinette that she can help herself. OK, anyone else totally not buying it that those are all of Jackie’s drugs? Who does she really think we are?

The dishonorable hero: Grace
Everybody put on a hat, because what I’m about to tell you will blow. Your. Mind. Grace has earned her school’s “Young Hero” award for all her volunteer work. Grace.

Unless she’s been volunteering down at the local chapter of DDD (Deceptive Disrespectful Daughters), I’m not buying it. But Jackie is. She’s super-proud, and even though Grace acts like she doesn’t want her there, Jackie shows up at the award ceremony. Turns out Grace is getting the award for her creation of the school’s Alateen chapter. She gives a lovely speech full of very important messages about the children of addicts not being responsible for the choices that were made, and how they are capable of creating boundaries and making healthy choices. Although it seems to convince Kevin and Jackie, the lies speech certainly isn’t convincing me. As we found out last episode when Grace was seen popping pills, the choices this addict’s daughter is making are far from healthy. To add to her dishonorable distinction, her new friend Mandy (Julia Goldani Telles) hides a purse full of Oxy under Grace’s mattress, and although she seems to hesitate, Grace caves to Mandy’s peer pressure (“Are you my friend or not?”) and lets her. Even Ray Charles can see where this is going.

The surprising hero: Coop
Coop’s finally been given the long-sought-after job of ER chief (due to the sudden reenlistment and exit of Dr. Prentiss), and he quickly lives up to his new title. A famous toy inventor is admitted with difficulty breathing, and it’s discovered that he has a respiratory condition that requires he travel with his own private physician. When the visiting doctor oversteps and tries to stop Coop during a procedure to aspirate the man’s lung (which, from where I was watching between my fingers, looked an awful lot like the insertion of a long needle into the man’s back), Coop tells him to get the hell out of the way, then elbows him in the nose with one arm while steadily aspirating with the other. Surprising. Who’d have thought those hands would be good for more than “examining” nurses? Well done, Coop. Well done.

The potential hero: Frank
Before we get to Frank and his potential, let’s talk about Eddie (whose only heroics this episode are to enable Jackie, which totally does not count). Apparently Jackie did give Antoinette all her drugs, because it’s the middle of the day and she’s jonesing pretty hard. After “demolishing an entire village of Sour Patch Kids,” she turns to Eddie for some contraband Soboxone, a drug that helps with cravings. Hey, I don’t know anything about Soboxone, but I find a tube of Pringles does the trick as well. Against his better judgement, Eddie gets the drugs for Jackie and tells her not to mix them with real drugs — you know, the ones that these helpful drugs are for.

When Jackie discovers Mandy’s purse of Oxycontin under Grace’s mattress, she shakes her head in disappointment, thinking they’re Grace’s … and proceeds to empty half the bag into her mouth. Later, after a long nap thanks to her Eddie-discouraged combo of Soboxone/Oxy (which apparently turns into truth serum when it mixes), she blurts out to Frank that she took seven pills. Frank freaks out and wants to call an ambulance, to which Jackie freaks out right back at him and tells him she doesn’t need him. Frank takes off, and after a moment Jackie runs after him, crying out his name. His potential heroism becomes clear when he stops.

“Help me,” Jackie pleads, and in her utterance of those two words, she has the potential to become a hero herself. I don’t know about you, but I’m definitely holding out hope for that.

Other things happening around All Saints:Carrie and Zoey form an unlikely friendship when dealing with an obese patient they have to take to a different hospital to get a CT scan. (Zoey: Road trip!)

Later, when Prentiss FaceTimes Zoey to tell her goodbye and she loses reception, Carrie hustles her to the hospital chapel, because “Jesus gets the best reception.” She brings Zoey tissues when she finally faces the fact that Prenitss is leaving and breaks down. Unlikely friendship, but don’t you think it has the potential to be a beautifully quirky one?

Expression Of JoyThe Brady Bunch: Groovy! The Bradys: Ritual hugging Married…With Children: ”Oh, great.” Thirtysomething: ”Of course I’m happy for you. Really. But what about me? Why does it always have to be about you? The Flintstones: ”Yabba-dabba doo

Expression Of Rage

The Brady Bunch: ”Hmmm…” The Bradys: ”If you back away from something you really want, then you’re a quitter!” (the angriest any Brady has ever been) Married…With Children: ”Aaagh, God, take me from this miserable life!” Thirtysomething: ”I’m not angry, OK?” The Flintstones: ”Willllmaaaa!”

Typical ProblemThe Brady Bunch: Marcia and her rival both want to be the prom queen. The Bradys: Bobby gets paralyzed. Married…With Children: Al doesn’t buy his family Christmas presents. Thirtysomething: Nancy gets cancer. The Flintstones: Fred and Barney are staying out too late.

Typical SolutionThe Brady Bunch: The prom committee decides to have two queens. The Bradys: Bobby gets married. Married…With Children: They hate him. Thirtysomething: If only we knew… The Flintstones: Wilma and Betty decide to follow them.

Attitude Toward SexThe Brady Bunch: Never heard of it The Bradys: Omigod — even Cindy does it! Married…With Children: Peg: Yes. Al: No. Thirtysomething: They didn’t get all those kids by accident. The Flintstones: Prehistoric

How Spouses FightThe Brady Bunch: They don’t. The Bradys: Infrequently, but it happens Married…With Children: Tooth and nail Thirtysomething: They stop talking The Flintstones: Fred and Barney go bowling while Wilma and Betty max out their charge cards.

How Kids Get Into TroubleThe Brady Bunch: Greg takes a puff of a cigarette. The Bradys: Carol’s grandson steals her business cards and sticks them in the spokes of Bobby’s wheelchair. Married…With Children: By committing felonies Thirtysomething: Ethan plays with a forbidden toy rocket. The Flintstones: They don’t.

How They’re Punished

The Brady Bunch: ”It’s not what you did, honey — it’s that you couldn’t come to us.” The Bradys ”Next time, ask.” Married…With Children: By the authorities Thirtysomething: It blows up in his face. The Flintstones: They’re not.

What Family Does For FunThe Brady Bunch: Takes special three-part vacations to Hawaii and the Grand Canyon The Bradys: Has flashbacks Married…With Children: Exchanges insults Thirtysomething: Talks The Flintstones: Attends showings of The Monster at the Bedrock Drive-In

Unsolved MysteriesThe Brady Bunch: How exactly did Carol’s first husband and Mike’s first wife die? The Bradys: What’s with Marcia’s new face and Bobby’s blonde hair Married…With Children: What kind of hair spray does Peg use? Thirtysomething: Why did Nancy take Elliot back? What do Gary and Susanna see in each other? The Flintstones: How does Barney’s shirt stay on if he has no shoulders? Where do Fred and Wilma plug in their TV?

Worst BehaviorThe Brady Bunch: The Brady children once made Alice feel under-appreciated.

Best Reason To WatchThe Brady Bunch: This is what life should be. The Bradys: They’re all grown-ups now! Married…With Children: Terry Rakolta hates it. Thirtysomething (Tie) This is your life. This isn’t your life. The Flintstones: This is what life might have been.

Best Reason Not To WatchThe Brady Bunch: Blurred vision from rerun overdoses. The Bradys: You’re all grown-ups now. Married…With Children: She has a point. Thirtysomething: After a while, you think it’s real. The Flintstones: The Simpsons