the intro...

Hello and welcome to my blog!I’m your hostess, Ladyface.

I'm a 27 year old queer femme sex worker. Between my fancypants day job and my super sexy side gig I spend a lot of time being an attentive, diplomatic Ladyface so this blog is where I’ll let my hair down...I might even curse. Though I curse like a kitten sneezes, which is too say it's infrequent and harmless and still shocks me more than anyone.

I am a sex positive lady and will write candidly about my kinks, my history, my exploits and my daily life (but only the good stuff). And so that I can write as openly as possibe, I'm keeping this space anonymous.All characters are real people in my life but all names are pseudonyms and always will be.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

The Day Job (for now)

I am currently so underemployed that I frequently forget I have a job. I “work” for a private company tutoring (torturing) kids for the SATs and ACTs. It’s something, but it’s not enough to fund my frozen yogurt habit, especially if I want sprinkles. (And I always want sprinkles). But back to the topic at hand, I was hired to tutor teens and on occasion I end up stepping in to tutor children as well. Yesterday was one such day. After two hours of working with a wonderfully diligent and sincere SAT kid I got switched over to munchkinland.

As I mentioned in my intro I will create pseudonyms for all characters to keep this space anonymous. And as the majority of the children I tutor seem to have been named by the “random” wikipedia function I will follow suit.

So, where were we? After two hours of SAT tutoring I was switched over into munchkinland. I was teaching a six year old girl. She was to read aloud from her workbook, discuss the picture with me and answer a few questions. After one story about a pizza shop we were discussing the picture: a 70’s-ish black and white line drawing with some red highlights. I listened and occasionally offered words of encouragement as she pointed with her teeny finger and explained what was happening in the picture using the context of the story. “That’s the man, and that’s the woman. That’s the pepperoni pizza. There’s the restaurant and the sign and that’s the pepperoni bush.”

She was right. The bushy shrub in front of the restaurant was covered with red smudges that looked just like the red smudges on the pizza. I was about to explain that it wasn’t actually a pepperoni bush but then I imagined getting suckered into explaining where pepperoni actually comes from and then explaining to her parents why their first grader had become a vegan. So I went with: “Precisely, Cleopatra. That’s the pepperoni bush. Excellent deductive reasoning! Here, have a dolphin sticker.”

And then we read stories about jellyfish and peanut butter and hot air balloons. In the one story we even flew to the moon! Which, as it turns out, is not made of cheese. Because cheese comes from cheese trees, clearly.