This should probably be titled horrifying Monday or sickening Monday but it doesn’t fit the pattern. So, here we are anyway.

If you do some type of sexual act with an animal, is it rape? Apparently in New Jersey it’s not for the simple fact that you can’t ask the animal how it feels about it. A former police officer was arrested after police found a tape of him allowing cows to lick his penis and balls while he videotaped the scene. There aren’t even words to describe my initial reaction to that. I’m just at a loss really.

Robert Melia Jr. was brought before a judge and grand jury to face charges of animal cruelty with the horrifying video as evidence. But the charges were dropped. Why? Because the judge concluded that the prosecutor failed to prove to the jury that the cows were tormented by the acts of the defendant. WHAT THE FUCK?! The judge went on to say that it remained unclear after testimony if the cows were tormented or simply puzzled. Holy hell. Basically, because you can’t ask a cow how it felt after licking this man’s penis it automatically made it not cruelty against animals. Where did this judge get his credentials? Honestly. So when a dog is beaten by its owner it’s not cruelty because the dog can’t turn around and say it was hurt? It’s probably the most backwards ass reasoning of something that I’ve ever heard. That was a shitty judge.

Overall, since all the cows could do was moo, it apparently meant they consented to the whole thing. I think my brain might have just exploded. Also the author of the article I read about this actually called it a “moonlight tryst” and a “one night stand” which is frightening all on its own.

So the man gets away with the cow molestation but hopefully the court will nail him and his girlfriend for molesting three little girls, which was the entire reason they found the cow porn tape to begin with.

What is wrong with people?!

This is really a two for one week since the whole MM concept applies to both the cow molester and the inept judge. What more can you ask for, really?