Dude Trashes Apartment

After rocking the world with the Hipster Grifter story, former Gawkerer and current Observerer Doree Shafrir is back with a new tale from humanity's murkiest moral precincts: Some dude totally trashed his friend's apartment, bad.

Queens resident Matt Tratner let his friend stay in his apartment while he went to London earlier this month. When he came back he realized he had made an error in judgment:

Nearly all the contents of the apartment had been thrown to the floor. An antique marble gas lamp that had been in his family for generations had been broken into pieces, an antique clock destroyed. The living room sofa was in the bathtub. All the windows had been broken. The insides of the toilet had been ripped out and the apartment had flooded; the shower fixtures had also been yanked from the wall. Mr. Tratner's computer had been destroyed. There was a metal antenna that had been driven into the hardwood floor, and the electrical outlets had been torn out. The gas stove had been dislodged. All the light fixtures had been shattered. And there was blood, tons of it, everywhere-smeared on the kitchen cabinets, the walls, the doors, the mattresses.

That's one thorough trashing! Unfortunately there are no hipsters evident in this story, so its life as an internet phenomenon will be short-lived. In the meantime, Tratner's pals are raising money for him to replace his stuff.