Sunshine State

An Actual European Princess Is Moving to Florida

To have a royal of one’s own! That’s the thing. To be living in a free and democratic country (for now), but to have a royal on your shores! What’s better? England has Mr. and Mrs. Markle, and look how good they’re doing. Spain has the tall one with the salt-and-pepper beard. Sweden is just lousy with them—so lousy that the country will share one of their royals with . . . Florida. Florida! The state of gators and illegal butt injections and the “bridge people” of Palm Beach, usually ruled by humidity, will now be ruled by a Swede. Well, not ruled per se. But host to one. Per a press release from the Swedish royal court, Princess Madeleine and her husband Chris O’Neill are moving to Florida with their three young children.

Where in Florida? Gainesville? Tampa? Majestic Daytona Beach? The release doesn’t say, which makes one worry for them. Do they know what they’re getting into? Have they set their Google Alerts to “Florida” recently? Florida can be a wonderful place, but it can also be a place where a woman gets arrested for shoplifting while dressed as a turkey.

The family isn’t new to the States, so they know what Florida is. The princess met O’Neill in New York, and his family had a vacation home in Palm Beach that was mostly a retreat for his mother, according to the Daily Mail (He has dual U.K. and U.S. citizenship.) The family recently sold that house, so they’re not moving there specifically, but elsewhere in Palm Beach might suit them. Their neighbors would be Rush Limbaugh,Rod Stewart, and, depending on the season, President Donald Trump. Perhaps they’ll set their sights southward to Miami, somewhere near the fated Versace mansion, and really round out the history and headlines of that place.

Princess Madeleine can take this American leave of absence from the throne because “the children are still in pre-school age,” and she is the seventh in line to the Swedish throne. For reference, Prince Harry is sixth in line to the British throne, right behind his father, brother, and his brother’s three children. But could you imagine Harry popping off to Orlando or wherever with his bride? It seems unlikely, but, Harry, if you’re listening, Orlando would welcome you with open arms. It’s always been a logical place for princes and princesses.