The pleonastic adventures of a lovely enigma

Posts Tagged ‘amigurumi’

Ok, so not technically, but it will be the first one I’m sharing on my blog. I made this little lady for a friend who had to undergo an emergency hysterectomy. She wanted me to make her something that would make her laugh & she has an amazing sense of humor. So I decided to make her a happy uterus to replace the very unhappy one she was losing. I called her Womb-y, but she renamed her. Introducing Ursula Uterus!

I made her out of some leftover baby yarn and a hook one size smaller than what is called for on the yarn label. She also has pipe cleaners in her Fallopian tubes to make them poseable. Once my friend saw her, she immediately asked me to make Ursula some friends, so I whipped up this little entourage to remind her of all the things she no longer needs to worry about: Sally Sanitary-Napkin, Tammy Tampon & Sid the Sperm.

I am happy to report, my friend loved them & they now live on her desk at work. I love the expression on Ursula’s face; I think it makes her look like she has a secret. So now, on to the pattern. If you have any comments or corrections, just let me know & I’ll fix them! 🙂

What you will need:

pink yarn (I used Bernat Softee Baby)
small amount of white yarn of the same weight (Again, I used Bernat SB)
small amount of black yarn for features
hook 1 size smaller than called for on the label (I used an F)
stitch marker
2 pink pipe cleaners
yarn needle
fiberfill

Abbreviations:

BO = Bind off
Ch = Chain
Ea = Each
Sc = Single crochet
St = Stitch
Sctog = Single crochet together, used as a decrease. You may use an invisible decrease if you prefer

Happy Uterus Pattern

This project is worked in the round throughout.

Using pink yarn, ch 2
6sc in first stitch (6 st)
(2sc in ea st) (12 st)
1sc in ea st around, using front loop only (12 st)
Work even for 1/2- 3/4″ (mine was 3/4″ to use as a reference)
(1sc, 2sc in same st) around (18 st)
Work even for 1 row
(1sc, 2sc in same st) around (27 st)
(2sc, 2sc in same st) around (36 st)
Work even for 1 row
(3sc, 2sc in same st) around (45 st)
Work even for 9 rows
(4sc, 2sc in same st) around (54 st)
(5sc, 2sc in same st) around (63 st)
Work even for 5 rows
(5sc, sc2tog) around (54 st)
(4sc, sc2tog) around (45 st)
(3sc, sc2tog) around (36 st)
***Stuff with fiberfill before continuing for a firmer finished result***
(2sc, 2sctog) around (27 st)
(1sc, 2sctog) around (18 st)
(sc2tog) around (9 st)
***Stuff with fiberfill. Make sure it is as firm as you would like before you continue***
(1sc, sc2tog) around (6 st)
(sc2tog) around (2 st)
BO & close hole

**I chose to embroider the features on her once she was stuffed, but if you would prefer you can put on the features before you stuff the main body of the project**

Fallopian Tube Pattern (Make 2)

Using pink yarn, ch 5
Sc in ea st around (5 st)
Work in the round for desired length (Mine are 4 3/4″)
Thread pipe cleaner through center- this process can be eased by threaded pipe cleaner through yarn needle & using the yarn needle to help the pipe cleaner through the tube.
Weave in one end of loose yarn.
Use other loose yarn end to sew the tube onto the body of the uterus.
This is the tricky part & can be omitted or done differently if you would prefer: Attatch pink yarn to exposed end. Wrap yarn loosely up & around the stitched to create loops which form the Fimbriae of the Fallopian Tubes.

Ovaries (Make 2)

Using white yarn, ch 2
6sc in first st (6 st)
(2sc in ea st) around (12 st)
Work even for 1 row
(sc2tog) around (6 st)
(sc2tog) twice
Fasten off, stuff & close hole
Sew ovary in the middle of the loops created at the end of the tubes.

Thanks to lovely commenter Cora Shaw, I realized that I never did write up and add the entourage patterns. With the current government legislation on the table, I think there couldn’t be a more fitting time to post these little guys. So we’ll start off with Tammy and go from there 🙂

Tammy the Tampon

Using white yarn, ch2 *leave about a 3 1/2 inch tail, this will become the tail of the tampon when you are all finished*
6sc in first st (6 st)
(1sc, 2sc in next st) around (9 st)
Working in back loops only, work evenly in the round for 1 row (9 st)
Continue working in the round for 8 more rows. Use the blunt end of your crochet hook to stuff your crocheted tube.
(1sc, sc2tog) three times (6st)
(sc2tog) three times. Fasten off. (3st)
Using yarn end, sew closed so that you have a finely tapered point and hide yarn end.

Now you can enjoy your very own Tammy! These ones work up quickly, so you can make several and package them in an old OB Tampon box to give as a gift to your friends 🙂

****** UPDATE 3/24/12 ******

I cannot tell you how happy it makes me that so many people are looking to this fun pattern right now. I am a firm believer that radical crafting can make a difference in almost all situations; let’s face it, what person could receive a knit or crocheted uterus and not at least smile at the sheer sight of it? I’m sure even our uptight and misguided lawmakers can see the humor in this form of expression (also, just be aware that you may need to amend your attached note to read “Thank you for keeping my/our uterus/i safe” instead of “Now that you have a uterus of your own, please stay out of mine” if your lawmakers are as outraged by the current legislation as some of our lucky friends from progressive states- no need to send the wrong message to people who are already standing up for us). Now on to the pattern!

Sid the Sperm

Using white yarn, ch 2.
6sc in first ch. (6st)
(1sc, 2sc in next st) around. (9st)
Work evenly for two rows. (9st) **If you want your little spermy slightly more oblong, you can increase this to 3 rows worked evenly, but I worked 2 rows in my example picture**
(1sc, sc2tog) around. (6st)
**Stuff lightly**
(2sctog) around. Sl st to join row and then once again in the stitch opposite from your hook to close the hole, but do not bind off. (3st)
Using your still-attatched yarn tail, ch7.
Sl st in 2nd ch from hook and in next 5 st. Sl st to join to body. BO.
Hide both yarn tails, twist sl st-ed tail to resemble a corkscrew and you’re done! 🙂

a very long time. I know. I’m awful. But in my defense, life has been turned upside down & my darling boyfriend is trying to finish the first draft of his novel (160,000 words at the moment!!) and is monopolizing the computer.
So…. here goes a quick summation of life since my last post. Thanksgiving & Christmas celebrations for Brandon’s side of the family were at our house this year. I cooked my first Thanksgiving dinner all by myself. And the turkey turned out amazingly well!! (Though I did slice a large chunk off the side of my index finger off when trying to break down the leftover bird, ouch…) We also had homemade: stuffing, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, gravy, rolls, & whipped vanilla cream. I took a lot of pride in making everything from scratch. Next year, I won’t have anything to prove, so I may just buy the rolls 🙂 We put up the Christmas tree on Thankgiving night, as always. Christmas on Bran’s side of the family was uneventful. The tree is still up (for shame), but I did manage to get all the decorations off on New Year’s day like a good girl. Just never got around to taking down the tree.
On Christmas eve, my “niece” (my aunt’s foster daughter that they are currently trying to adopt) was admitted to the hospital with severe bleeding problems, kidney & liver failure. They did not expect her to make it, but like the little 3 year old tropper that she is, she has finally regained consciousness. She is still in the pediatric intensive care unit at UVA, and has more severe brain damage than she had before (she was born to a mother addicted to drugs & has suffered from severe dibilitating seizures her entire life), but my aunt & uncle are ecstatic that she has regained as much of her old self as she has. She will never be able to talk; they don’t think she’ll be able to walk, but she is here 🙂
Then in January, my grandfather passed away very, very suddenly. He died of a heart attack in his driveway while my grandmother was in Shawville taking care of her other granddaughter (my 2 year old cousin Charlotte). She beat herself up for not being there with him for quite a while, but now seems to be doing as well as possible, all things considered.
Latest issue has been my mom. She’s now doing a little better physically & mentally than she has been, but while she was in the hospital this last time, her credit card was stolen & long story short, she now owes the bank $5,000 in fraudulent charges. My family cannot afford a lawyer to fight this, so we have to eat the debt. And my bank has confiscated my paycheck to pay for my mother’s debt. If my phone number hadn’t been listed on my account, I never even would have been notified. They left a message on my cell phone for my mother, thinking it was her number, and then cleaned the account. Needless to say, I am up a creek. This is where my paychecks are automatically deposited, my bills are paid automatically from this act & it is the only money I have to buy food, gas, toiletries & all other necessities for getting through life. Thank goodness for Brandon. If not for him, I would be out on the street. I have had this bank account for 24 years (it was started for me by my family when my mother & father found out they were pregnant) & am going to be forced to close the account so as not to have my paychecks stolen to pay someone else’s debt (since I should not need to assume her debt unless something happens to both her & my father).
But I have been doing a little something crafty to help calm my nerves. Mostly, I’ve been eating 🙂 But I did make this little guy tonight. I call him Gus. He’s for a woman at work who asked me to make her a turtle. I think he’s a charming little fellow 🙂

Soon I will be taking some time off from making “things” to inprove my knitting and crocheting skills by making my own swatch/guage notebook. I want to try some new patterns/stitches but I want to do so w/o the commitment of a large pattern. And maybe after my tension issues disappear, I will go for my Master Knitter Certification from The Knitting Guild Association. But until then, I need to post my most recent FO’s.

So here is my finished MILK purse. I used some cabling from a book in my knitting library, but I don’t have it in the office with me. I will relay the name of the book in a later posting. However, I have found that my skills are very, very lacking in the sewing/lining department. But we don’t need to show that part, now do we? No. Who needs to see the inside of a purse? Not I; please say not you, either. I beg of you…

And also, a take on this pattern… I made him into my own little mini-monster. He reminds me a little of Sully from the Disney/Pixar movie Monsters, Inc. His name is Liam, and I have decided he is an Irish monster eyeball, and he is laboriously trekking his way back home to Eire after having wound up on a cruise liner to the States. Please don’t ask; he is quite embarrassed that he took the wrong boat. He only meant to go see his girlfriend, a lovely vampire eyeball, in London. Now, he will have a lot of explaining to do when he gets home. (Well, not until I crochet her… but then… he will have to spend a lot of time on his knees… err… lids, begging for forgiveness).

And in profile:

For now, I am gearing up for another long work week. And counting down the days to my vacation. Brandon, my dearest boyfriend, has his b-day on 2 September & mine is on 8 September. This year, we have taking off the 2nd through the 8th and I cannot wait!! Perhaps I will do some swatching… Who knows…