Time is not a line,
But a dimension lost in space.
It knows no beginning,
And has no measurable end,
So it seeks permanence in memory.

And so what are memories?
But moments that somehow transcend time,
Transcend space.
Transcending me back to my distant actuality,
To my Shades of Blue.

The tide ebbs out to the shore,
And I paddle in my little canoe,
But in the opposite direction,
Against the current of my birth.
Because I remember drowning,
Drowning in a sea of tears,
Drowning in my Shades of Blue.

I was baptized.
Not in crystal streams of green
But in shark infested waters of blue.
A Baptism in a faith?
If so what is faith?
Is it faith to believe that nothing is begotten to you?
Not even your own happiness?
So in the name of the Father,
And of the Son,
And of the Holy Spirit
I bow my head in supplication,
Knowing that these acts are ceremonial,
Ephemeral,
Bearing no intrinsic meaning
As I have been baptized into disenchantment.
Out! Out! Brief candle,
And in my darkness,
Let me find some light,
Tones anew.
Let me lose myself.
Force me to hemorrhage,
Force me to castrate
My Shades of Blue.

Out of the shadows
He came professing the same tautology.
Different but the same,
The same pot but a different color
A nuance of ochre, raw sienna and umber.
BURNT Umber!
So once there was one,
And now there are two.
Duet shadows etched on empty walls.
An ideal that is idealistically nothing!
So return me to my Shades of Blue.
Return me to my solitude,
Where it was just me,
Maladjusted to this unfair absurdity of fate.

Time is not a line,
But a dimension lost in space.
It knows no beginning,
And has no measurable end,
So it seeks permanence in memory.