So a couple of weeks ago I commissioned the very talented @extinct for something I've had in my head for a while now and boy did they ever deliver. Folks, they did a fucking fantastic job.

Without further ado may I introduce to you Mother Jones getting fed up with Kevin Drum's poor hating, anti-leftist bullshit and just absolutely laying his stupid ass out. For my followers that still have twitter accounts by all means post this at Drum as often as possible please.

6:00am: wake up in chronic pain because i couldn't afford healthcare6:30am: watch reality TV and documentaries where praying mantises move at 200% speed with panther growls dubbed over it8:00am: drive kids to school in SUV9:00am: call comcast 12:30pm: call AT&T3:00pm: pick up surviving kids from school3:30pm: get arrested for going 1mp/h over the speed limit4:00pm: get killed by prison guards5:00pm: corpse gets shot5:30pm: corpse is towed and fined

Europeans love to talk about their ancestor named like Hfsborg Halfsson who conquered Kroptalia in 1115 then got too drunk and died on a boat, while Americans have a shrine to their great-great-great-great-uncle named Brevet Colonel Jepsfield H. Q. Teffler who got shot in the nuts in 1863 and died of sepsis.

I got stuck in Haunted Mansion earlier and I had to listen to this ghost lady say the same thing about being sure to bring my death certificate over and over again and I never want to step foot in that evil mansion again

american: i'll have a sodie popwaiter: that'll be three dollarsamerican: here you go, three dollars, plus twenty-eight cents tax, as taxes are NOT included in american priceswaiter: thank you for your service to our country. by sodie pop, i assume you mean coke, as coke sponsors every restaurant on this side of the mississippiamerican: of course. pepsi is an ungodly sin, and i hold INCREDIBLY strong opinions over this.waiter: *gets shot*