Signs He Intends to Marry You

When He Thinks About Marriage

Does he have marriage on the brain? Does it seem like the puzzle pieces in your life are adding up this way? Marriage is a big step, but when you've found your soulmate, saying vows could be right around the corner.

There is so much to be said about marriage. It is as old as humanity itself. We could look at trends from around the world where families married off their young, often with the women as property — thankfully, we don't live in the past. Marriage has evolved. It's a more romantic place. And divorce rates are falling. People are taking their time before getting married, and there are a lot of resources out there today that will make it easier than in your parents' time.

Back in the olden days: gifts were exchanged, ceremonies given, and often it was more about family and economic value rather than romance. Parents often discussed with another family the prospect of marriage. A woman often didn't have any say on the matter. Wealthy families were able to give dashing gifts for the ceremony.

Of course romance has entered the field, and people typically use marriage to stay with someone who they love. Usually people marry for romantic reasons, not just economical. Though of course, people do consider pocketbooks before exchanging rings.

So how can you tell if you and your sweetie are headed toward marriage or if things are coasting? Here is a quick list you can read while you hideout in your workplace bathroom or while you're waiting before your next big date.

Signs He Wants to Marry You

1. The flow of your relationship. It will feel like all the puzzle pieces are coming together, and perhaps with a great deal more ease than you have ever felt in the past.

2. You have made a point to share the most important people in your life. You're meeting relatives, close friends, and even going on far away trips to meet certain people that are important. If you haven't met the important people in this person's life, then you probably are not close to marriage.

3. There are discussions about the future and your expectations. The future isn't a mystery to you. The both of you see the other person as someone who will be there 5, 10, or 99 years down the road.

4. Look around and the majority of your friends and their friends are married, on the way to getting married, or just general settling down. When your friends are getting married, that means it's on the minds of your social network. And you likely are getting there. Friends are friends because they think alike or are on the same page, so if they're all getting married, it isn't a stretch that soon that will be your reality too.

5. Things are settled. You've both grown up, you've made progress in your careers, you have independence. You have the resources to get married rather than it seem like a far away fairy tale.

6. He's trying to figure out your ring finger size. Maybe he jokes about proposing anytime soon. He gets more gushy and excited about you than he did in the not so recent past.

7. He talks about how he envisions marriage and includes you in his vision.

8. You flat out ask him, and he tells you what he is thinking and says it like it is.

9. You've discussed where the two of you will live, you've discussed moving in together, you've discussed what kind of wedding you want.

10. They treat you without absolute love, respect, care, and as if you are a part of them. Being away from you is torture.

11. They tell you that you're constantly on their brain. They think about you when they go to work, when they go to the dry cleaners, when they're going to bed, when at the grocery store staring at apples, and when they walk the dog.

12. The two of you are in synch. You talk to each other every day, love is strong, and the two of you have an impressive amount of positive shared history.

13. Contact with exes has been dropped to an all time low. They're not keeping up with their pasts and are more focused on the future. They are future focused.

14. If you're long distance, you're planning how and when you'll see each other and how to make it last.

15. You discuss finances openly.

More Signs...

16. He has asked your dad permission to take your hand in marriage, if he's old school like that.

17. You're talking about buying a house together.

18. You're discussing how many kids you want or if you would prefer having no kids.

19. His family is your family. Your family is his family.

20. The two of you have already been making heavy promises to each other.

21. He starts trying to impress you all over again. He starts wearing nicer clothes, he lays on more compliments, he has that puppy love look in his eyes. Also, he starts taking you on more romantic dates, he makes a point to clean your shared spaces, and he often cracks a smile over the little things you do.

22. He brings up the idea of a possible marriage and does so unsolicited.

23. He is spending a lot of time, energy, and resources focused on you. His world has you at the center and not at the side.

24. He is being mature. He has got a job, a healthy stream of income, and he makes responsible and clear headed decisions.

25. He keeps you informed, he keeps you in the loop, and he definitely doesn't leave you in the dark. You know where he is, you two know each other.

26. Passion and intimacy increased. Passion and intimacy are strong and relentless.

27. You're front and center in his life. You go to all the events together. You look good together. People envy what you have. For months, years even, the two of you have successfully run off to your own magical world of your own.

28. He doesn't poke fun at you for the little things but supports you. He calls you hot when no one else will.

29. He buys you gifts for no reason at all.

30. He wants you to try new hobbies with him.

Is He Going to Propose?

31. The idea of the two of you breaking up tears him up inside. He has all kinds of ideas of where the two of you will go from traveling all over the world, starting a number of creative projects, and maybe having a house with a little dog with a cute pink bow tie collar. The man has a vision, essentially.

32. He is open with his love. He doesn't try to hide you. Love is like an open book between the two of you.

33. Your arguments are smooth like butter. To the point that you might not even realize it happened.

34. Both of you feel old enough to take the marriage plunge.

35. Instead of taking the fancy job in another city far, far away -- he decides to stay with you and fight for the relationship. Because to him a career is simply a career. But losing you would be the biggest mistake of his entire life.

36. He is excited by the idea of waking up and you being by his side forever.

37. He starts saving money intensely for a few months and is planning some kind of romantic getaway vacation.

38. He makes an excuse to look at engagement rings with you.

39. He says "I love you."

40. He takes you to his hometown and shows you the highlights of where he grew up.

41. He does things with you he otherwise wouldn't be doing whether shopping, glamour, a tea party, or going to a feminine gathering that makes him uncomfortable.

42. He saves the most random things from you. Maybe he writes down quotes from you. Maybe he has a list of the creative ideas you guys have together for the future.

Comments

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sending

Karen

6 weeks ago

Today he said my name with his last name.

AUTHOR

Andrea Lawrence

2 months agofrom Chicago

If you can bring it up casually, see what he is thinking about the future and see how much he talks about you.

AUTHOR

Andrea Lawrence

2 months agofrom Chicago

It's different for every couple. Consider how financially stable the two of you are, if you are in a steady part of your career, and just overall how you feel.

Usually when a guy wants to marry you, he starts impressing you more, and trying to plan something without you knowing all the details -- or plans something big. But it's best to just let it happen and not get yourself worked up about it or you'll have too many expectations.

Elna

2 months ago

All of these applied to my relationship except numbers: 6, 8 (never asked) 16, 17, 19 (not family but we’re on really good terms), 21, 22 (I wish), 37, 38, 41 (he’s always accommodating and so am I so he’s not excessively accommodating recently) and 43. I’m honestly confused haha. On one hand I just want to ask him and see what he says but on the other hand I know his money situation could be a little better so I don’t want to pressure him or rush him by asking. Our relationship is so solid and we’ve been together for over 3 years, I’m just not sure what to do except wait haha. Great article though, thanks!

samanthaharding

2 months ago

hi there my boy friend asked me about getting married one day how would you know when its the right time for him to ask me...

AUTHOR

Andrea Lawrence

8 months agofrom Chicago

I am thankful you enjoyed this hub so much. I'm also delighted by this in depth comment. I think doing pre-marriage counseling is a solid idea.

Robert E Smith

8 months agofrom Rochester, New York

I was identifying with so many of the items. It's uncanny. I bet the writing was a smooth constant flow of words until you were done with the article. I could have written it but it would have taken me years, I think. It is amazing the differences between my first marriage of 20 years and my second in which we are starting our 20th year together. In the first marriage I felt the "bride's family" pulling me or pushing me to her side. They all weren't at all worried what kind of a guy I was or if I would treat her well. At the time I noticed it but just chalked it up to acceptance of me and then I dismissed it out of hand. I never wondered about so many of the little things in that list and I think I should have.

In my present marriage, the list you have made was a bit more real for me. I had been married and had good and bad experiences. I knew stumbling blocks to look for and made sure we talked about them. This time I made sure to go to pre-marriage counselling. I thought that this second marriage would be just perfect because of all the pains I and she went through to ensure our future happiness. But to my surprise a whole new list of pitfalls appeared over the years to tell me that no relationship is perfect, no marriage is flawless or always magical. I am happier and much more contented now. My bride seems contented and we do try to talk about everything. This thing called marriage is not for wimps or the faint of heart. It takes determination, relentless attention, self-sacrifice. It never goes quite as planned but that's okay, we are together. I enjoyed this hub immensely. Bob.

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