"I can make your pussy whistle like the Andy Griffith theme song." - Drake, Best I Ever Had I imagine a vagina actually doing this and then I have nightmares. Filed under: Most talented dude ever / So freaky Posted by Chris Macho

"I'm Toucan Sam." - Gucci Mane, Guitar Freestyle Under no circumstances is there any acceptable reason for a man to say this unless it is Halloween. If you do, you are insane. Filed under: Fuckin' so crazy Posted by Chris D'Elia

"Let me give you swimming lessons on the penis." - Ludacris, Money Maker There's no such thing as giving someone swimming lessons on the penis. Sorry. Filed under: Don't get in a pool with this man / Worst babysitter Posted by Chris Macho

'Y'all niggas eat pussy and burp." - Canibus, Poet Laureate On behalf of everyone who just read this or have heard this before: "Ew, that's gross. Please stop rapping." Filed under: Lost my appetite for a while Posted by Chris Macho

"Got poor credit, got whore debit." - Rick Ross, Cross That Line You owe whores? Or they owe you? I don't get it. I guess that's okay though, because there's no such thing as "whore debit", and I shouldn't have to think about this for even another second. Posted by Chris Macho

Y'know, Lillie, Chris probably, like most people, types the way he talks. If you walk down the street and listen to people talking to one another, most people these days do use "like" more than they should. And putting emphasis on the word "so" does not make you gay.
Way to be sooo judgmental.

"A, you, plain and simply, back up off her. B, you hit it just a little bit softer. C, you take it out and put it in her butt. Well, D is what I do, so, yo, listen up..." - Shock G, Freaks Of The Industry by Digital Underground Not only should you not take instructions from this man because of...

"Call me Mr. Carter or Mr. Lawnmower." - Lil Wayne, A Milli I'll probably just call you Mr. Carter because if I call you Mr. Lawnmower people will think we're both assholes. D'Elia: Funny, I used to get my grass cut by Mr. Lawnmower & Sons. They were not gangster.

"Just make sure you mention my name in the top brackets. And make sure they mention your name as the top faggot." - Jadakiss, Air It Out I just... laughed... so hard at this. "Top brackets" are something. A "top faggot" is nothing. You can't be the best at being gay or gayer than other gays. ...

I actually thank you for clearing that up, Anon. That was actually a fairly interesting bit of trivia.
But please, for the sake of me not going cross-eyed trying to read your post, check your spacing when you copypasta stuff. Please?

"My bathtub lift up, my walls do a 360." - Jadakiss, We Gonna Make It This would be sucky if this actually happened in your house. Also, if anything, don't you mean to say 180? Filed under: Lost his mind

I hope Tinyfolk was joking/being sarcastic. Being a good lyricist does not make you immortal. Also, "we're" and "were" are two very different things. "We're" is a collective noun, and "were" is the past tense of "are".
Also, win @ Ruby. Yes it does. And "shint" doesn't sound like it could be anything good.

"Keith Murray, the holder of the boulder." - Keith Murray, K.I.M. by EPMD Okay... the worst job ever OR Just said it because it rhymes. Filed under: So basic / Not fun / Not necessary / Worst job of all time

"One Mississippi, you can't get with me. Two Mississippi, you never gonna hit me. Three Mississippi, can't no bitch trick me. Four Mississippi, won't no dogs sick me. Five Mississippi, we in Mississippi twenty deep on the block." - Styles P, Livin' The Life by The LOX Dear rappers, For about a...

"Up in Benihana, see me slangin' them chairs." - T.I., Big Shit Poppin' How non-gangster is it to hang out in chain restaurants and throw chairs around? Filed under: Barred for life from Benihana restaurants

For fuck's sake, people. This is getting really irritating.
WE. UNDERSTAND.
Stop trying to explain shit. We get it.
Enjoy the simple humor and laugh, or get off this site. It's not that hard.
This is why they put the little red 'x' in the top right corner.

"Lay the beef on his noodle, make some Luger lasagna. Forty-cal fettuccine, trey-pound pasta... ya reach for this medallion, you must like Italian, nigga." - Fabolous, You Ain't Got Nuthin' by Lil Wayne This is such a long, roundabout way to tell people that not to mess with you and touch your...