There are probably as many different kinds of bad movies as there are bad movies themselves. There are bad movies that don’t know they’re bad. There are bad movies that are so bad, they’re good, and there are bad movies so bad, they’re, well, bad. There are multi-million dollar bad movies, and there are shoestring budget bad movies.

Inbred Rednecks falls somewhere in the “low budget bad movie with a sense of humor” zone. Joshua P. Warren (born and raised in North Carolina) wrote, produced, directed, filmed, scored, edited, and starred (along with many other locals) in Inbred Rednecks. The movie, which was shot on 16mm and released direct to video, tells the story of four rednecks and one extremely large cock.

Billy Bob has the largest cock ever seen in North Carolina. Yes, it’s a rooster, with half human and half rooster DNA (guess how THAT happened). “Bigass Rooster” (yes, really its name) has been primed to be the cock fighting champion of the south. After whooping Monty and his champion cock (Demon, Monty’s rooster, actually commits suicide during the cock fight), Billy Bob, along with his friends Joe Bob, Bubba, and Clovis, set out to get rich by exploiting this one very large rooster. Unfortunately, Monty later steals Bigass Rooster, which sends the inbred foursome on a search for their extremely large, and now missing, cock.

And that’s pretty much the plot of the movie, which has somehow been drawn out to a (sometimes painful) two hours and fifteen minutes. Along the way the rednecks have adventures, like running an old, retarded moped-riding guy off the road, and throwing a cup full of “chewin’ spit” onto a passing jogger. Of course we can’t forget Sweetmeat the Midget, a waiter at the local bar who eventually has a “midget fit” and later has an untimely death in an auto/midget collision. “What if a midget was really big and mad, then he could probably kick your ass,” the rednecks ponder amongst themselves in a moment of (somewhat) inbred-lucidity.

Here is where my review splits into two parts — the “real movie review” section, and the “b-movie review” section.

[Real Movie Review]
If you are expecting anything resembling a movie from a major motion picture company, you will soon realize how long two hours and fifteen minutes can seem. The video quality varies from bad to really bad — the fact that the DVD was transferred from a video tape doesn’t help it’s case much. The audio suffers from even more problems. For starters, for most of the film, the dialogue comes through only my right speaker, while the cheezy synth added music only comes through the left — I’m doubting this is what they had in mind when they designed “surround sound”. At least one scene had some ADR (voice dubbing) that didn’t even come close to lining up to the character’s mouth movements. On top of all that, the acting is pretty bad all the way through, with most of the actors overacting (especially with facial expressions), especially Billy Bob and Monty, who overact in almost every scene they’re in.

The biggest problem with the film isn’t the amount of boom mics, stage lights, or duct tape seen in practically every scene; it’s the pacing and editing. The editing isn’t bad for an amateur effort, but while watching the film I found myself fast forwarding through scenes that are just too damn long. In one particular drawn-out joke, one redneck asks another if he would cut his pinky off for a billion dollars. Then he asks his friend if he would he cut off his “peter” for a billion dollars. Then he asks if he would “suck a dick” for a billion dollars. Then he asks if he would do it for a million dollars, Then a hundred thousand. Then a hundred bucks. It drags on, and on, and on. I began to feel like I was watching someone’s home movies. It’s like every second of footage they shot is still in the final cut. That’s one five or six minute joke that could be cut down to 30 seconds, easily. Another scene, where Bubba goes into a grocery store to try and buy condoms without being seen, is literally five minutes long. I checked the timer on my DVD player. Five minutes is a long ass scene, especially when the payoff joke isn’t worth the time invested. Many five and ten minute adventures in the film could have been edited WAY down, or cut entirely. With too many long, drawn-out scenes, you end up getting tired and bored, waiting for the joke to end and the next segment to begin. The movie contains too many one-off jokes that don’t do anything for the plot (except slow it down).

Finally, people who are used to mainstream movies will probably get offended at some of the jokes found in Inbred Rednecks. While the “cock” jokes are funny (even though they get driven into the ground pretty quickly), all of the gay bashing and stereotypes will leave most viewers blushing or offended. Except the midget jokes, of course — midget jokes are always funny.

One last thought — can anyone explain to me why in a movie that is supposed to take place over a week or two, no one changes clothes? Do rednecks never change clothes? Who knew?

[B-Movie Review]
Inbred Rednecks is bad in the way it was intended to be. And while it’s not the greatest film ever made, it’s most likely better than anything you’ve ever done. I’m sure putting together a 2+ hour film with no budget is quite the undertaking, and regardless of quality, the guys were able to pull it off. Sure, the film has some pacing problems and the quality isn’t the same as what you’d see in a theater, but it’s a decent effort and the end result is a movie that, while not great, is representative of a home grown B movie. Some of the jokes work, and would probably be most enjoyed with some friends, some hot wings, and lots and lots of beer.

Here is where the review splits joins back together.

Inbred Rednecks is available on DVD from, among other places, Best Buy and Netflix. The DVD version, while not offering viewers the increase in audio and video we’re used to, does have a three bonus items. The first is “Joshua P. Warren’s guide to B-movie making,” in which Warren shells out a nickle’s worth of free advice about how to organize and film low budget films. The second extra is a long collection of extra footage, cut scenes, and interviews with the cast and crew. The third big extra is a commentary track, which consists of Warren and three fellow cast members. In one of the most annoying features of all time on any DVD ever, the commentary begins about three minutes before the movie. If you’re listening to the commentary track, you’re staring at a black screen for three minutes. If you’re NOT listening to the commentary track and just watching the movie, you’re treated to a black screen WITH NO AUDIO for three minutes. On my Pioneer DVD-525, there was no way to skip through the blackness. I tried jumping chapters, fast forwarding … nothing. Boy, there’s nothing like getting your audience excited about your film like making them sit through three minutes of darkness and silence. Whee! Anyway, the commentary track is okay — nothing Earth shattering is revealed, and much like the movie, suffers from some quality issues (four people using one microphone, crunching ice from a cup, and passing around a bong make for one long, interesting commentary track).

For those who enjoy cheaply made B movies, Inbred Rednecks might be the Holy Grail you’re looking for. With enough friends and enough beer, Inbred Rednecks could be one of the most enjoyable bad movies you’ve ever seen. Without said friends and beer, it’s possible this is the worst film I’ve ever seen — in a good way, of course.

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