Cleveland's pretty people show us low-lifes how to party at Jet . . .Set . . .Go!

SAT 9/10

Back from rubbing elbows with the beautiful people in Florida's swanky South Beach, Marcus Sims is confident he can show Cleveland how to party with class at Jet . . . Set . . . Go! Says Sims, who organized Saturday night's soiree: "Our parties don't have to be beer and a DJ with two turntables."

Instead, Sims (pictured, far right) prefers to mingle with young professionals between 21 and 35 years old, who go out in suits and cocktail dresses to talk about issues that affect their careers, homes, and lifestyles. "Don't you hate the fact that there's no dress code anywhere in the city?" asks Sims. "As long as you have five bucks, you can party wherever you want."

Sims blames the sloppy club scene for Cleveland's brain drain. His outing, he says, is a stylish event for those with downtown lofts, fancy cars, and high-tech jobs. "My thing is to connect with people who travel [and are] into fashion and the arts," he says. "Those people are possibly more affluent and definitely more sophisticated than the person who goes out in flip-flops to the Velvet Dog." Party starts at 11 p.m. at Spy, 1261 West Sixth Street. Admission is $5; call 216-621-7907. -- Cris Glaser

Our Kind of Dinner Great Lakes pairs beer with everything.

TUE 9/13

Guests at Great Lakes Brewing Company's Brewmaster's Dinner on Tuesday can expect much more than just beer and chicken wings. In fact, a three-course meal will be served with appetizers and dessert -- all accompanied by complementary brews. "Every beer flows into the next course," says marketing coordinator Kami Dolney. "It's not just throwing food and beer on the table." The evening begins with a tour of the brewery, followed by the food: an appetizer of prosciutto and Gruyère on fig bread paired with the sweet and mellow Glockenspiel Weizenbock, corn pudding and lobster with the fruity Holy Moses White Ale, and braised short ribs topped off with the nutty Ohio City Oatmeal Stout. A guest beer -- Rocky River Brewing Company's citrus-graced Artisan Saison -- is also on tap. "[These] aren't just regular beers we get all year round," says Dolney. "They're exclusives." Dinner is served at 7 p.m. at Great Lakes Brewing Company, 2516 Market Avenue. Tickets are $40, available by calling 216-771-4404. -- Chris Miller

Clowning Around Bruce Bruce picks on everyone and pays the price.

9/9-9/11

As a kid, comedian Bruce Bruce was more than just the class clown. "I was church clown, barbershop clown . . . ," he laughs. "I got beat up daily for talking about people." No doubt family members also got in on the ass-whupping action. "I [had an] uncle who was five foot two and had a 75-inch waist," recalls the funnyman. "At Christmas, he would dance for about 10 seconds. Some music would come on, he would get up and use the restroom, dance, and sit back down. That's all he ever did." Hear more family tales when Bruce Bruce performs at the Improv (2000 Sycamore Street) at 8 and 10:15 p.m. Friday and Saturday and 8 p.m. Sunday. Tickets are $23 and $25; call 216-696-4677. -- P.F. Wilson

Beefcake Alert!

FRI 9/11

The Men of Sinsation, an all-male dance crew, includes Bobby K (pictured), a romance-novel cover model and onetime Playgirl centerfold; Tristan, a former Chippendale hunk; and Markus, a cop turned biker. "Romeo is our cowboy to wrangle up the girls," says Sinsation manager Lisa Axelrod. "And Sly is our arresting officer for all the bad girls in the house." They strip from 10 p.m. to midnight Friday at Tramp, 1360 West Ninth Street. Admission is $10; call 216-875-7777. -- Cris Glaser