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Recently, I was helping my daughter with her science homework and we were reviewing the basic steps of a science experiment—you start with a purpose, then you do your research, state your hypothesis, actually conduct the experiment, analyze the results and finally, arrive at a conclusion.

In my book I wrote about how, in setting goals for my daughter's rehabilitation after a childhood stroke, I loosely followed the structure of a “briefing note” which is a document often used in government decision-making. Briefing notes are structured to clearly identify the issue, that is, what's to be decided on or achieved, the background information, the considerations, and then, the next steps to be followed to achieve the intended outcome. In helping my daughter with her homework, however, I realized that the structure of a science experiment is equally applicable to figuring out how to achieve something, regardless of the context.

In the end, I don't think it really matters how you go about setting your goals as long as you make a reasonable attempt to apply some logic to it all. A clear idea of what you want to achieve, some thinking about the factors that can influence the outcome as well as the steps you might follow in order to move towards your goal must surely be more effective than just diving in and desperately hoping for the best.

I've tried both approaches over the years and although I have no specific data to analyze, I am certain that the logical and structured approach has been much more effective than when I've simply thrown my efforts at something without much thought. It's not scientific, but that's definitely my conclusion.

One of the things that I've learned in the process of rehabilitating my daughter after a childhood stroke, is the importance of appreciating and celebrating even the tiniest of triumphs. For example, the ability to zip up a coat, button a shirt or hold a piece of paper in one hand and scissors in the other, is something that most kids take for granted. But, for kids who have suffered a stroke, these tasks can seem impossible. In fact, in my daughter's case, these abilities came only after years and years of effort and frustration.

I don't think that we would have been able to sustain the effort that was required to achieve these goals if we hadn't, together, celebrated every tiny triumph along the way. And, when I say tiny, I mean really tiny—the slightest movement of any of the fingers that had been essentially immobilized since birth and, even when there was absolutely no movement at all, the mere fact that she was still trying so hard, was definitely worth celebrating. The brief moments of celebratory laughing and hugging that followed, helped keep us motivated and working towards our goal, however remote it may have seemed at the time.

If we constantly compare ourselves to others, we can lose sight of what is relevant to our own situations and our accomplishments can seem insignificant. But, all of our little accomplishments, no matter how small, are individual triumphs just the same. And, in my experience, they are most definitely worth celebrating.

I feel equally privileged and grateful to now also have my book included on the list of books recommended by the Canadian Pediatric Stroke Support Association (CPSSA). When my daughter was diagnosed over a decade ago, I couldn't find any relevant resources and the experience was tremendously isolating. Just like IAPS, however, the CPSSA is an extraordinary initiative which has been developed since then, to facilitate and support collaboration between families and physicians and, it serves as an important resource for families who have been affected by a pediatric stroke.

With it's vision to provide a compassionate community for Canadian families impacted by pediatric stroke—which is indeed a beautiful and compelling vision, applicable to families facing all kinds of challenges—I encourage you to visit the CPSSA website at www.cpssa.org.

Planning a child's birthday party can be fun but it can also be a lot of work. And, coming up with new ideas each year can definitely be a challenge. As a single mother, I already have plenty to do just keeping the basics moving along—from getting home from work as quickly as I can to planning meals days in advance in order to have enough time for homework, housework and after school activities, not to mention activities related to my daughter's rehabilitation after a childhood stroke.

I am continuously thinking of new ways to improve my efficiency but sometimes, all I have to do is use someone else's great idea. A good friend of mine, with whom I share a deep appreciation for strong coffee, regularly translates her culinary and artistic abilities into the most beautiful cupcakes. She added, however, a strategic element to this skill, applied it to the birthday party dilemma and came up with an excellent solution.

Basically, her idea is to prepare a large quantity of cupcakes, icing and sprinkles. Then, when the party-goers arrive, the “activity” for the afternoon is to decorate the cupcakes, which is something that all kids love to do. Each child gets to fill up a box and that becomes the "loot bag" that they will take home at the end of the party. Once a child's own box is filled, the kids start filling up a tray so that together, they create the "birthday cake". My daughters and their friends had so much fun the first time that we did this under my friend's careful cupcake coaching that we recently had our second cupcake party which was, once again, both fun and efficient—thanks to my crafty friend's outside-of-the-cupcake-box thinking.

Over the past decade or so that I’ve been helping my daughter overcome the effects of a childhood stroke, she has often said to me, in face of many different challenges, “I can’t do it, Mama.” And each time, I have always added, “...yet, you can’t do it yet.” It’s a small word but it has had such an enormous impact on our lives. I believe that if we close our minds to the possibility of something happening, then it is much less likely that it will ever come to be. In part, because with a mindset that is negative, we are more likely to miss all of the little opportunities (“fireflies”...) that might otherwise have taken us towards our goal.

I certainly haven’t been convinced every time that I have stubbornly added “yet” to the end of my daughter’s sentences, especially, since it has not at all been apparent how we could ever get around the obvious physical effects of her stroke. But I realize now that I didn’t need to see exactly how things would resolve themselves. What I needed to do was stay open to the possibility of progress and keep working towards it. Maybe there are certain things that my daughter will always do differently from others. But, there are also many things that seemed impossible at the outset and which we were told she would never be able to do, which she now has mastered.

“Yet” is such a small word—just three little letters. But when added to the end of a sentence starting with “I can’t...”, it adds a touch of hope and an openness to the possibility of a different, more positive outcome.