BOSTON, MA~ A local library has found itself embroiled in controversy after hosting a controversial "Straight Male Story Hour," an event at which a heterosexual, married, white, cisgender male reads a story to children.

The man, Bob Smith, was scheduled to come and read Where the Wild Things Are to the kids, a move that's said to endanger the progressive values this nation holds dear.

Parents protested the library in an attempt to cancel the event.

"We're a town, a nation of values, and for this guy to come in here not dressed up in women's clothes or a demon costume and try to read to our children---well, we won't stand for it, I tell you what," said Zed Manners, a concerned parent. "What has this country become when a white guy can simply come into our library and spread his dangerous ideas about whiteness and heterosexuality to our nation's youth? What do we do when people start thinking it's OK not to grow up to be a drag queen?"

"This isn't the America I grew up in, I'll tell you that much," Zed concluded.

At publishing time, the library had apologized for the event and scheduled an "Occult Transgender Satan Worshiper Story Hour" in order to make up for its indiscretion.

For the 2016 Election, I had written a song spoof on Hillary Clinton, from the viewpoint that she was going to win despite allthe opposition and hype on the media. But I didn't wantto post it after she lost because the song was about her boastingshe was going to win anyway. I added the anti-Trumpintro afterwards (see footnotes below):

"MAKING HISTORY"Satire on "Piece of Me" by Britney Spears

As Billy Clinton's wife, I paid the priceI lived a life of sacrificeI waved, and I smiled,Rolling eyes at his alibis

Because I never quitThat makes me fitTo run the government (and profit off of it)I'm your next President!

I'm a third term for ObamaCaused the whole Benghazi dramaWhat's the difference and harmIn paying back Iraqi karma

Next to Trump causing traumaI'm more looking like the Dalai LamaEvery day (what can I say)

I've got the Corporate MediaEating out of my handWhile legal lobbyists have chopped apartThe Law of the LandCorrupting every branch of GovernmentFrom Congress to Courts,Now are you SURE you wanna mess with me?

Hey you Domestic TerroristsThe IRS is after youForget the Crisis over ISISI'll just pay off a few!I'll drive the NRA so crazyThe State finds you incompetent(And takes away your Armament)Thanks to your President!

I'm a Democrat, I can't be racistI'll put those rightwing bigots in their placesWhen all the "Leftard Liberals" vote for meBecause that "D" stands for Diversity!(I'm making historyWhen I win the Presidency)

I'm Mrs. "Sanders Voters, not again!"What's up with Trump and grumpy old white men?They must be sexist if they don't want meTo be the first woman in historyTo win the Presidency

It's Trump who's gonna feel the burnI've laundered more in bribes than he has earned!It's women's turn to rule the worldIf you don't like it, hire some other girl!I've got the PresidencyI'm making history....

BillionaireCould've bought your own TV showBut insteadYou bought the White House for your EgoYa use Fake News to throw Ted CruzBeneath the Bus so he would loseAnd you could winYou'd say anything, wouldn't you?

Damage doneNo wonder why nobody trust youLeft and Right -We should unite until we bust you!Policing every Tweet you Tweetand every speech you speakUntil we find the bestExcuse to impeach you:

SpecialOlympian wrote:It's magical how white supremacists such as yourself will fully embrace non-white children so long as they can be used as props, Maz.

That's hilarious coming from a guy whose identitarian politics are nothing more than a beard for liberal elitism.

"only 12% of death certificates have shown a direct causality from coronavirus, while 88% of patients who have died have at least one pre-morbidity - many two or three." - Professor Walter Ricciardi, Director of the Department of Public Health

But yeah, it's conceptually great satire! We all know that historically satire has been used to aggrandize existing power structures and absolve their faults, such as lauding concentration camps and shaming those who oppose them.

Your ability to distinguish between things is impeccable, and not at all diminished by the brain smoothening you've subjected yourself to for years by quoting and agreeing with posts such as "I smell shekels" on /pol/.