Homosexual Extremists: We Will Stone All Muslims

An extremist group of gays based in Luton announced today that if they ever come to power all Muslim males who indulge in extremist preaching will be stoned to death.

The group, known only as Al Queera, said that either a stoning or a death by a thousand pricks will suffice. "We believe in Sheera law, and we wish for Britain to adopt our law and our way of life", said a spokesperson. "We see no reason to be tolerant of others and their beliefs. We do not recognise their beliefs."

The group has recently protested about the army parading in the city as they would rather see the navy. One local muslim said "I am an unemployed lawyer who spends all my time preaching religious hatred. This bloody scares me. I find these views to be extreme and unpleasant. I want the government to do more. They only give me money and pay my rent at present. But how can I organise the downfall of Western society with a bunch of Queens baying for my blood?"

The government has tried to avoid the problem. Jaquie Squiff said "Just because a group of extremists threaten others does not mean we will take action. Even extremists have votes."

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