When your parents get separated or divorced, you will experience emotions that you may never have had before. You will also experience emotions much more deeply than you ever have before. That is normal. If your parents just recently told you that they are separating or getting a divorce, you are probably still trying to get used to the idea. You may even be in shock or denial (unwilling to accept the news).

An announcement like that can cause you to feel sad, angry, depressed, lonely, guilty or many other emotions. It is important that you find someone to talk to about what you’re feeling and what you’re going through. Find someone you trust (other than your parents) to share your feelings with. This can be a trusted adult like a teacher, someone from church, or a family friend. It is important that you “get it out” and not let your emotions just get “bottled up inside.”

It might not seem like it right now, but with time things will get better. Your life will never be the same as it used to be, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t be happy again. Don’t rush it. Take your time. It’s ok if you don’t feel happy and and it’s ok if you do. Everyone is unique, and while your friends may seem happy within months of their parents’ divorce, it might take you a year, or two or more. Or, you might feel like you’ve finally found happiness again one day only to lose it when something else happens.

Hang in there! Divorce hurts, and it will hurt for years to come, but you and your parents can create a new normal. As you get used to the new routine, you will find that the things that used to make you happy can make you happy once again.