“If you are a dreamer,come in. If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a hoper, a prayer, a magic-bean-buyer. If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire, for we have some flax-golden tales to spin. Come in! Come in!” ~Shel Silverstein

Thursday, December 15, 2011

A couple of recent events have led me to this post. And please keep in mind, that I am just shooting from the hip here (which...if you have actually seen my aim with shooting instruments, you would be scurred)...but I have been thinking about how otherwise seemingly smart individuals can either misuse or abuse their bands.

So, let's pretend that everything is black and white... really so I can lump these misusers and abusers into one of two categories.

First, we have the Too Too Tighties. Now I understand the need for restriction. I know that in the beginning it is the holy bandgrail. I mean, the band doesn't really work for you until you HAVE restriction right?

And I understand, and have participated in, and also condone...getting a fill when you need it. Getting a fill when you feel like your eating habits need to be put in check, when your hunger is not only generated from your head...but your tummy.

I dig.

BUT, I do not understand being so tight for YEARS that you cannot, unless baby Jesus or Santa Clause gives you a special pass, get food down before noon. Or just for s's and g's, what about being too tight for YEARS that you actually have trouble getting water down for a few hours every morning. I'm sorry dude. Not cool. And a lot of us have been too tight...you know...after you beg your hot doc for a full cc. But choosing to use your band in this way is dangerous. And when you start to experience problems that are most likely a result of being too tight for so long...well...I want to say...did you not think that having this implanted device squeezing so tight for months and months wouldn't lead to issues?

Now to be fair and balanced, let us look at the other end of the misuse and abuse spectrum. I am talking about those people that go through all the trouble to have surgery...but then never follow up with their doctors, never get fills, never put forth an effort...and then blame the band for the lack of weight loss. WHAT DID YOU GET THE BAND FOR THEN? If you werent going to stay in contact with your doctor, if you weren't going to go for fills...what did you think would happen.

WHAT PEOPLE? WHAT?

Scene: Amy starts rocking back and forth, muttering "The best way to spend Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear (Elf)"

Heather is out of town for the night (not too far away though) awaiting the birth of her first niece...and sadly...what I was looking forward to the most...was eating pasta with shit-tons of cheese, some bread with butter (um...Parkay), and ice cream. And I have.

And it was goood.

Now I am in a food coma.

Is 7:54 pm too early for bed?

Last night we played the game "where-the-hell-is-the-camera-i-bought-you-for-your-birthday". Which means I just started taking random Wednesday night pictures. Here are the pigs waiting for Santa.

Me and the little lady. As white as our little wife beaters.

And speaking of ladies...

So please excuse me while I go drink Pepsi right out of the 2-liter bottle.﻿

Monday, December 12, 2011

One of the pictures that really startled me. In my mind...I didn't look like this.

Same trip as picture above. Probably somewhere around 325-330 pounds.

On the right: 12/4/2010 170 pounds. On the left: today. 174 pounds

So hmmm. I thought there would be a noticeable difference in my tone since last year...but there is not much. That's okay. Maybe I should be happier that at least there it's not worse.

I took this picture below the other day. I wanted to show you guys the difference in where my boobs ARE and where they should be...but then I heard my mother telling me my father says I share too much. So I cropped the happy boob out (it's not like there was a nipple or anything), but its a close up of how my stomach is doing.

That scar there that you can see is my biggest one. The remaining 4 have faded very nicely.

So that is the picture progress...I will try to work on something witty and amazing for the 3 year on January 27th. Happy Monday. It's practically over!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Have you ever been gone from Blogger for so long that you want to come back but you dont know where to start. Like do you do a recap of your absence? Do you just come out swinging talking about the profound thoughts you had this morning regarding vibrators? Do you try to think of a funny bathroom related story? I just couldn't decide. So I will pretend that I havent been a bad blogger for the last...oh...million weeks.

Hi guys! Seems like just yesterday that I posted.

Hope all you Stateside had a good Thanksgiving. As it goes in the Gainey Clan, we spent most of the 4 days hunting. Now, hunting down here involves dogs. You let out your dogs and they run the deer, and then you spend most of the time hunting the DOGS in a pick-up truck. No deer were killed. Which Heather was a little bummed about because she is determined to kill one so we can have meat.

Here is a picture of me and Fisher. We don't need real guns...with guns like these.

My Heather and "the other Heather".

Basically, me and "the other Heather" just rode in the backseat while Henry and my Heather were in the front seats doing serious hunting. Now, when you head out for a day of hunting, you usually get out there around 5 am and may not come home...no home for lunch or anything...until 5 pm. So I come packing food okay? I should of takin a picture. But me and the other Heather would just sit in the back, blanketed in cheetos, chips and dip, bacon, biscuits, pringles, puppy chow. It was awesome. It would be 6 in the morning and we would say "um...could you pass me the bacon and pringles please". Good times. Good times.

Last week I took a hunters safety class where I got to shoot a bow, a rifle, and a shotgun. It was totally hot.

I have been shopping for Christmas. This year I am SO GOING ROGUE and buying people what I want. No Christmas lists please and thank you. Remember that Heather doesnt really "do Christmas". It stresses her out and makes her grumpy. So I already bought her some boots she wanted and she is wearing them already. But I have a few presents under the tree for her BECAUSE I WANT TOO! She bought me a Columbia jacket in front of me, and I tickets to an Eric Church concert. Which excites me in the naughty kind of way. He is my new man crush. In fact, the day I announced that he has passed Jennifer Nettles (from Sugarland) in the running for my heart...Jennifer announced she married some model dude. Coincidence? No. I think not. Clearly she was jealous.

On the weight front, its up a few pounds...around 174. But I aint worried. That's nothing a week of buckling down couldnt cure. My band is el-loose-o, I think I will wait until January to get a fill. I am not sure I want to go back to tight band living. I like to eat with a little more freedom.

On the workout front, things are good. I am still working on getting bigger muscles. Lower body is getting a lot of focus....as well as my triceps. A lot of sore muscles. Mommy likes.

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Welcome To Amyville

I am a chronic make-believer. I amuse myself. I break out in random song at least 6 times an hour. I am me. I was banded on 1/27/2009. I look better tan. I am a mermaid. I believe you should give more than you take, laugh more than you cry, and eat cheetos when the urge arises. I have always been a dreamer. Life is unpredictable and I realize everyday how lucky I am. I think you should walk with your head up, shoulders back, look people in the eye, smile, have a good handshake, and be honest. I love cold sheets, colder air conditioning, swimming, my family, my animals, and my friends.