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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

My best friend's mother just passed away
after suffering from Alzheimer's for the last several years. As she sat by her
mom's bed for the last week watching her fade away, I could not stop to wonder
what it will be like for my mom when her time arrives. As I received the news
uncontrollable tears began to run down my face. I knew a great deal of
the sorrow that I was feeling was connected to my own personal grief.

At the Alzheimer support group that I have been attending for almost
three years, my leader has been telling me that I was in a grieving process. The
first time she said this to me, I responded that I was not, because my mom, was
not dying. Now I understand all, too much.

It's funny because just the
other day one of mom's nurses reassured me, with delight in her voice, that my
mom was doing great. She shared with me how blessed my mom was and that she'll
be around for quite a while. After hanging up the phone my emotions, thoughts
and feelings ran rampant.

Yes, I understand that I am lucky to still have
my mom, yet I also know how much more Alzheimer's can rob from her. Just
thinking of how much worse she could become, as this disease progresses, leaves
me feeling nauseous and sick to my stomach.

I must confess, that at
moments throughout the years, knowing that there is no cure, I have wished that
my mom could just close her eyes and go to sleep. I know that if she
understood or could see what was happening to her, she would also wish for the
same.

Today,I am in mourning for my best friend's mom and
maybe also grieving for mine. For now I know that I must express what I am
feeling to free myself from these haunting thoughts.

Maybe for my mother
and our family this will be a long goodbye. Whatever it is I need to get back
into the space of feeling grateful. In less than two weeks I will be going with
my son to visit her. As long as I can see her smile and hear her say she
loves me, I will push myself to come from a place of being thankful. Yet for
now, I can only feel saddened.

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Coming to terms with a loved one
nearing the end of their life with dementia is never an easy situation.
But it’s important to recognize this stage to make sure our loved ones
receive a good quality of life as this time comes near. Making sure
there is a strategy is a must so individuals can pass well with their
dementia.

Karen Harrison specializes in end of life care and believes a
problems with end of life care is the failure to recognize the signs
early. Moreton Hill Care Center practices early end of life care using a
NHS approved Golden Framework. Watch and learn about a daughter and her
mother living with Alzheimer’s, who have benefited from this care.

Read more at http://blog.thealzheimerssite.com/the-importance-of-end-of-life-care-with-dementia/#hJdqbw8ZzkPa3HSA.99

As dementia progresses, it becomes challenging to find activities
that encourage mental, emotional, and sensory stimulation. At the same
time, we are often in search of ways to connect with our loved one when
conversation is no longer an option. Possibilities are as wide and
varied as one’s imagination, but here are a few ideas to get you
started.

Jessica Bruder, author of our August cover story, “The End of Retirement,” was on MSNBC’s The Cycle
this afternoon to discuss the challenges facing Americans who thought
they’d be enjoying life after retiring, and instead found themselves
part of a vast migrant workforce.

Thursday, July 3, 2014

The Karnataka State government has decided to increase the number of day-care centres for the elderly from four to 14, according to Minister of State for Women and Child Development Umashree.

She announced this at the inaugural session of a workshop on ‘Differently-abled persons – opportunities and challenges’, jointly organised by the Administrative Training Institute, Abdul Nazir Sab State Institute for Rural Development, and the Department of Women and Child Development here.

Presently such centres were in Bangalore, Hubli, Belgaum and Gulbarga, she said. Such centres would be set up in the districts of Mysore, Hassan, Chickballapur, Bidar, Bellary, Dakshina Kannada, Dharwad, Tumkur, Chitradurga and Bagalkot, she said.

The government had increased the annual allocation for these centres from Rs. 4.15 lakh to Rs. 11.2 lakh. Similarly, the helpline for the elderly, which covers 14 districts, had been extended to the entire State, she said.

Ms. Umashree said the government had decided to set up two centres in Bangalore to cater to the needs of children with cerebral palsy.

Legislators were supposed to earmark 10 per cent of their Local Area Development Funds to works related to the welfare of persons with physical disabilities, she said, and sought a report from officials on funds spent for the purpose. Similarly, Ms. Umashree called for a review to know if all the departments had properly executed the gender budgeting concept.

Talking computers:

Principal Secretary, Department of Women and Child Development, Amita Prasad, said that “talking computers” (computers with voice-prompting facility) would be provided to visually challenged students. She said the workshop had been organised to create awareness among persons with physical disabilities about their rights and the benefits available from various government schemes. Similar workshops would be held in Mysore, Dharwad and Gulbarga within September, she said.

The story of three aged women from Pachalam, who had no one to take care of them, grabbed the attention of city residents again recently when the eldest among them passed away. The plight of the sisters, however, is familiar to many elderly people here.

“The two older sisters, Alli and Santha, used to teach at a government school in the city. They were living on the pension that both of them received,” said the owner of a shop next to the sisters’ house. Alli, who was 92, passed away last week and her body lay at the house for two days before local people found out about the death and informed the police. Police admitted Santha, 82, and her younger sister Baby, who is mentally-challenged to the Ernakulam General Hospital. Both sisters were later shifted to the Government Mental Health Centre at Thrissur.

The situation of the aged sisters is a reflection of the breakdown of systems to take care of the elderly in society. Increasing number of people are being abandoned by their families and forced to fend for themselves in their old age, social activists observed.

“What happened to the sisters and other stories we hear about old people being abandoned at Guruvayur are all early warnings of a problem that is growing every day,” said Biju Mathew, State head of HelpAge India. Mr. Mathew said that the elderly currently constitute over 13 per cent of the State’s population. “They are expected to form more than 24 per cent of the population by 2025. That is almost double the current figure and we need to plan for the future,” he said.

Social workers trying to bring relief to the elderly come across several cases where the elderly are left to fend for themselves as their children cannot take care of them. “In many cases, the children are working in different places or do not have the time or money to take care of the parents,” sad Nisha Varghese, co-ordinator of the Kerala Social Security Mission’s Vayomithram project in Kochi.

In such cases, Vayomithram helps shift the abandoned elderly to old-aged homes. The project also offers medicines and palliative care to the aged and can be reached on their helpline number9349388887.

Mr. Mathew feels that old-age homes are only a temporary solution.

“We are suggesting setting up self-help groups for the elderly in the model of the Kudumbasree programme. Such groups will ensure that the elderly feel productive. Besides providing company, the community will also ensure the welfare of each member,” he said.Source: http://www.thehindu.com/news/cities/Kochi/increasing-number-of-elderly-abandoned/article6169239.ece

Caring for an ailing parent can teach us a lot about toughness, perseverance and, especially, love.

Caring for an ailing parent is a life-changing event.Beyond the sadness and suffering, the experience can teach caregiving children a lot about toughness, perseverance and especially love. WSJ contributor Dave Shiflett shares his story on Lunch Break with TanyaRivero.

My father was born and died at home.Nearly 91 years separated those two days, as did a lifetime of
significant experiences, including one Great Depression, one World War, one wife, three children, and one year at my house, where he, accompanied by my mother, went through hospice during his struggle with
dementia.

Our family's experience was hardly unique. Around 5 million Americans suffer from dementia of some
type (Alzheimer's disease is the most prominent) and up to half of Americans over the age of 85 are afflicted. As our population ages, tens of millions of Americans will be called on to care for stricken parents. Over 15 million nonprofessionals are estimated to provide Alzheimer's care alone.

What can families expect?

Like all extreme experiences, caring for Dad changed our lives. Dementia is a terrible disease that robs its victims of their memories, their good nature and much of their dignity. Children of suffering parents will see
many things they wish they hadn't, and they may learn things about themselves that aren't always flattering.

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