To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.

Nothing can prepare you for the stress and frustration (I need some new words!) of having a toddler with a newborn. I knew going into this that TJ would get jealous. I knew that he would have to be watched like a hawk around the baby for a while. I knew that he would want and need more attention. What I didn't know was that he would want ALL of my attention, 24 hours a day (and not really care at all if he has Trey's). I didn't know he would turn into a complete ass that has decided that he is going to tell me what to do from now on, and not listen when I tell him what to do. His reply (usually) now to, "Eat your food, TJ." "You eat your food!" He now has to go to time out at least once a day, if not more, for telling me "NO!" when I ask him to do something. He had to go to bed this evening for about an hour because he wouldn't listen, and wouldn't stay in time out. The only reason he got to get up was b/c we felt bad to send him to bed w/o eating first. Tonight he didn't get to read stories w/me b/c he refused to let me change his diaper, and instead went in the kitchen and played and ignored me when I called. I'm working hard on my consistency, and making sure that he gets one warning, then I follow through on the consequences. It's harder than it sounds, and quite challenging at times to be able to follow through. I swear the boy is running at 400 mph, and I'm barely going at 10 mph! I thought for sure that he would calm down today since Trey was here, but no. Trey kept the baby almost the whole day, and TJ demanded me 100% of the time! Oh, I know this was expected, and it's perfectly normal. I know that it will pass, and he will become my precious boy he used to be. I know that my mom right now is reading this and thinking, "She just needs to spank him." I can honestly say that even I, the crusader against spanking, have thought, "Maybe if I just do it once..." I must stick to my guns, though, b/c I know it will work. I have to believe that those people who very rarely spank probably would use it in these circumstances. I can't get over feeling totally guilty for pretty much telling TJ no all day and thinking he must feel like I don't love him anymore. I try desperately to avoid getting upset with him lately, but he's ten times worse now. He even dropped a wooden box on my head today when he was doing something I had just told him not to do! It's funny, though, b/c once I yelled at him for it, he finally left me alone!

So anyway, I feel like this blog has become my outlet for complaining. I promise that hopefully soon it will be more positive again. God, please help me get through this, and please help me make sure I do what's right and have faith. Also, please make TJ act better!

On the flip side, Reese absolutely LOVES Trey! She has spent most of the day wide awake just staring at him. It's really adorable.

Secretly, Trey is madly in love with her, too. Of course, he has to act like the tough guy...

Have a great day! Oh, and I put some interesting articles down below this if you'd like to take a look. Talk to you later!

Stay-at-home mom stress:http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/06/29/earlyshow/series/main705015.shtml (You'll have to copy and paste them in your address line. When I hyperlinked them, they threw my blog all out of whack!)I like this article. I'm totally feeling this stress, and it made me feel better about staying home. Lately I've been feeling like I should go back to work b/c at home I'm useless.

New baby stress:http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/06/28/earlyshow/series/main704689.shtmlThis made me feel a lot better about what I wrote about yesterday. And it taught me something cool about oxytocin, my new favorite hormone!

Infant massage:http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/03/07/earlyshow/contributors/lauriehibberd/main678516.shtmlI've heard and seen a lot about infant massage. I don't actually have a sit-down massage everyday for my kiddos, but I make it a point to touch them every chance I get. TJ just expects me to rub his back, head or legs whenever I'm near him. A lot of times before bed I'll rub him down all over after his bath with lotion. When I change Reese's clothes, I make it a point to rub all over her, and exercise her limbs. Massage is supposed to stimulate your child and somehow make them more intelligent. The article says some more stuff. I think it's pretty cool...and hey, TJ is pretty dog-gone smart!

First off, before they totally ruined the episode of Trading Spouses that I was really looking forward to watching tonight w/Bush's speech, they mentioned that the reason he was having it was to update us on what's going on in Iraq, and to try to up his popularity with the US public. I would like to point out that he is not helping his popularity rise by surprising me and running his mouth during my shows! I remember one week he came on during The OC, and I almost died! You don't mess with The OC! If he wants to be more popular, come on during something stupid, like the news. Now that I could stand to miss!

So anyway, it's been, what, four days now on my own. Trey's off tomorrow and Thursday, and I have to say I am SO HAPPY! I didn't think I'd make it! The first couple of days were okay, but now, I'm just flat worn out! It's not even so much that I'm tired, just frustrated. She cries, then he cries, then she cries, then he cries..."Mommy, play with me!" I feel like I'm spending more and more time each day giving TJ one-on-one time to let him know he's still loved and all, and then I'm just holding Reese to get her to stop crying and feed her. I want to pay attention to her, too. I'm amazed that I managed to get the dishes washed and the kitchen cleaned up, three meals made, muffins made with TJ, the kitchen floor swept and cleaned and a load and a half of laundry done (one's still in the washer). Oh, and I finally finished writing my thank you notes and watched House and my taped episode of The Inside. I even took part of their nap with them! I did all of that, which to me seems like a lot in retrospect. However, when I look back on the day, all I can really think about is how I feel like I spent it catering to two whiny little people. Man, how many hours are in the day! Someone just tell me that it gets better. I mean, I guess I'll always be doing this stuff now, but does it get more tolerable and less frustrating? I have to admit that there have been a few moments in the last few days where I'm really regretting having kids at all, and thinking about how much easier life was before them. What's really upsetting, though, is that I feel like I haven't done anything worth talking about. I mean, I didn't teach anyone how to write their name today, or save the world. I just cleaned the house a little and put up with two kids. At least on days when I take TJ to the playground or library, I feel like he's gained something. Today all he learned was how to boss Mommy around while playing with his cars ("Drive the car here. No, here."). Geez Louise!

I'm sorry to gripe so much. I guess I'm just in a mood today. My guess is it's the rain--it was so yucky today. I hope. I'm sure tomorrow will be better (Trey will be here!). I hope that your day was better than mine. I think I need to find some friends for real, so I can hop on over on days like this! I'm off to put up the whites now and take a shower. Have a great day! Later!

Okay, if you didn't get it the first time, or went to try and found out I didn't give you all the info you needed, try going here again if you're following the whole Gage thing. It's a website where his mom is writing to let people know how he's doing. It's quite inspiring, if I do say so myself. Definitely lets you know how faith in God can make miracles happen. Okay, here it is: www.carepages.com . You have to register when you get there, and then you visit a carepage. Type in rockshelterdeliverer. Okay, thanks, and I hope it gives you reason to have more faith like it did me!

For your daily viewing pleasure:He was so excited that she was lying with him. Of course, he was terrified that he would hurt her, thus the reason he looks so stiff! Ain't it cute, though!

A moment of heavenly bliss...

Oh, and in the first pic, TJ said he didn't want me to take a picture of him. So I told him I would just take one of her, and he could watch. Don't tell him I got him, too!

Yeah, so someone at Ben Carter Properties did a search today on Yahoo...for spinabifida butt cheek. Guess what--my blog was the second thing that came up! How nice to know that I can be found so easily!

Nothing starts off your day better than hearing the words PERFECT and THRIVING from the first person you talk to! Especially when you're at a doctor's appointment that you scheduled WAY too early! So my day has been made, b/c these are in fact the words used by good ol' Dr. Moore this morning when speaking about Reese. She's now 9 lbs. 3 oz. (she's gained almost a whole pound in a little over a week!). The dr. said they usually hope that the baby will gain back up to her birth weight by her two week appt.! Yeah, well, Reese was born into not one, but two families that love to eat, and there's no doubt she'll fit right in! Of course, TJ was the same way, so...Anyway, she said everything's great, and to keep doing what we're doing! Just makes a mom happy to hear!

I wanted you to see how much she's grown already. This picture doesn't do her justice, though. Tomorrow is her 1 week checkup...I'll let you know what they say.

TJ is totally in love with talking on the phone, especially to Nana. He doesn't like it when I interrupt him. Here I thought I didn't have to worry till at least the middle school years for him to be a phone hog!

Okay, I've made it through two whole days as a mother of two, all alone with no help during the day. I must say, I've done a damn fine job! I got dishes done, the house cleaned, all the laundry done, and I'm sure other things! Plus, I've given TJ lots of one-on-one time, which he loves, and made sure to sit and stare at and talk to Reese when she's awake. I've even remembered to feed everyone! I even made Trey breakfast before work today (Pop-Tarts!). Of course, now I'm totally exhausted (lack of sleep may have something to do with this...)! I think I just may be able to do this! Hooray!

Okay, moms, I have a question for you. I was told by the dr's. and nurses not to do anything for at least two weeks after getting home. I was told I'd be in pain and unable to do much other than take care of the baby. I will admit that I'm tired from losing sleep, although it's minimal, I think. I was sore for a little while, but not enough to keep me from living and moving, especially w/the right pain killers! I was told not to vaccuum and stuff like that, but I don't see why. It's the same with driving. I really feel alright to do that stuff now. I keep thinking maybe I'm missing something, and that maybe I am worse off than I thought. So my question is: Did any of you bounce back after having your babies faster than you thought you should? I really feel like I'm missing out on some down time and sympathy that maybe I totally deserve!

Hey, don't you all want to come over for a slumber party!!! We can drink lots of cokes, and eat popcorn, and watch Grease, and dance, and sing, and tell each others' secrets, and play games, and lots of other fun stuff! We can stay up all night long! Just don't let me forget that every three hours, we have to play the Feed Reese game! It's so much fun! You might even want to try it! What's great is that we can have a slumber party EVERY NIGHT! Come on! You're all invited! I'm waiting for your knock at the door!

I vowed that I would try to put a picture on here everyday for a while, since the baby will be growing and changing so much. However, I don't want TJ to feel left out. Oh, and there are only so many pictures you can take of a baby sleeping! This was taken through a window, and my mom thought it looked kinda cool...So do I.

I had my first margarita today...as a mother of two. It was gooooooood! Of course, an hour later, I was dead tired and ready for bed. Yeah, right! Could you imagine being a mom of a 2 year old and a newborn and going to bed EARLY!? Yeah, exactly...

TJ is being a full-on toddler. I know it's got a lot to do with having a new baby sister. Not to mention the fact that he had his mommy stay in a hospital for two nights, and was not happy about that. Then after just a couple of days back home, he was thrust here to Charleston. Nothing is as it's supposed to be for him, and quite honestly, I don't blame him. I, personally, am in a bad mood lately. I'm not physically myself, and all this stuff's being thrown at me, and yet I have to act happy and like it's nothing. Anyway, TJ doesn't like to be told what to do anymore (ummm, like he did before!), and his new phrase is, "Don't talk to me!" It really grates on my nerves when he says that. I'm really not sure what to do about it. My mom thinks he needs to be spanked, but that is NOT happening. I'd put him in time-out, but I can't really think of how to put it to him that he's being punished for being a smart mouth and make him understand that. It's not just that, either. I totally knew he would act out when the new baby came, so I'm not surprised. I just guess I'm not doing the best job at making him stop. Anybody have any tips?

Oh, and if you've been keeping up with Gage, from Gina's page, please go here: www.carepages.com You may have to register, but it only takes a second. His mom has put updates on his progress on there, and it's so great to see he's doing so well!

Alrighty then, I hope you have a super fantastic day, and I'll see you later!

Saturday night, Trey ran up to work, and got home around 11:30 pm. Sometime after that, some very sweet person (or people) decided it would be to their benefit to bust out his passenger side window and borrow his radio and our credit card he had in his car. Sunday afternoon, we were planning to go for a walk to the park, and I needed to get the diaper bag out of Trey's car. I went to see if it was unlocked, and I noticed that just the passenger side was unlocked (???). I looked further, and saw his busted window (it was tinted, so it pretty much stayed together) rolled up in his driver seat. My instant reaction: "Did Trey break his window and he's not even going to tell me!?" (Uh, duh!) Yeah, that didn't make sense, so I thought someone might have broken it accidentally, and left us a message (again, double duh!). As I looked around for this message (am I this naive!?), I noticed that the radio was missing. Finally, it started to dawn on me...Anyway, no walk to the park. He called the cops, and they said they'd caught the guys, who had broken into 8 cars in my neighborhood alone that night. They thought they had his radio in custody (but Trey thinks he'll never get it back). That sucks. We would have had to pay a $500 deductible to replace the window and whatnot, but my mom ROCKS! She jumped right to it, and found someone to do it for $160. Then, she gave it to Trey as his birthday present! Are we not the most blessed people in the world! I asked my mom how cool it feels to be one of God's valued workers! I'm gonna have to do one of those pay it forward things...because I totally can't afford to pay her back right now! For that matter, I've got lots of fat hookups to pay forward. I'd better get busy!

Oh, so that's why I'm in Charleston. My mom managed to get an appt. for yesterday for Trey's window. It was tons of fun to get to ride all the way here with our really cool duct-taped window. We looked SO cool...Trey made it look NICE! What was even more fun was having to climb over the driver seat and the console to get to the passenger seat...especially after you've just had a baby! Did I mention how very cool my mom is! I love you, Mommy! I couldn't imagine having to wait till we could afford to have it replaced, since that would have taken forever.

Trey is pretty mad about the whole thing. I don't blame him, but keep reminding him that it won't help anything to be angry. Just be thankful for the fact that it wasn't worse. You know, though, it's a horrible thing. Have any of you ever had something like this happen to you? It really takes away your sense of security. Trey said that night he saw the guys dealing drugs out in the parking lot and glared at them (why he didn't call the cops we'll never know). For that matter, I've seen them, too. They've been hanging out in our parking lot for a couple weeks or so now. I was suspicious, but I really didn't think I could say anything. Especially since I worked at DJJ, I'm suspicious of everyone. I figured I was just being paranoid. Anyway, I found out that if you ever even feel suspicious or something doesn't feel right, that's enough for an anonymous call to 911 (that's what the cop said). He said if you call them, then they can talk to the person. Because of profiling and stuff, they can't unless they actually catch the person breaking the law. So, I will put them on my auto-dial!

You know, I think I was heading somewhere else with this thought. I think it was something along the lines of how being a victim of even something that small just really takes away your sense of safety and security, and that's horrible at home (well, I guess it really is anywhere, really). Trey's really upset b/c he has to pay for what this jerk did, and I don't blame him. Those guys will probably sit in jail, spending our tax money, for a week or so, then they'll be right back out doing it again. Meanwhile, Trey has no radio in his car (which isn't that terrible, but still) and had to get his window replaced. Thankfully there was my mom's help, but still, we really couldn't afford the gas to drive to Charleston and back. I just don't understand this. Anyway, crime sucks.

I guess this has gone on long enough. I hope you all have a terrific day, and I'll see you soon!

To Trey, I hope it was a good one. I realize we didn't do much, but I'm going to show you my love by cleaning out the microwave...and telling you how much I truly love you. You are the BEST father and husband a woman could ask for! I do believe that your great personality has been the one super reason we have been so good together...I mean, anyone else would have killed me by now! So, here's to you, Daddy, Trey, Man of the Year--Happy Father's Day!!!

In case you'd like to see, here's what I gave Trey for Father's Day:

Only the cutest kids in the world (I mean, he helped a little bit, but...)

and...

A tie! Only the ultimate cheese factor! Plus, it came complete with pictures of TJ! Oh yeah, he's gonna look GREAT at work!

While I'm at it, I'm going to go ahead and let you see the pictures I took of Reese with her eyes open, at the request of many:

More to come, I'm sure...

Have a great day! Oh, and check below...I need you to do it, please. Later!

I may be coming back. However, I'm torn with the uncontrollable urge to get on my computer and blog all day long...and the uncontrollable urge not to. It's tough. Right now while Trey's here I should take advantage. After he leaves, it's all on me, and I doubt I'll have the time. Especially since TJ's decided that he will, in fact, be a little jealous of the new baby, and thus will demand much more of my attention than I'll probably have. So...

I will be here, though. I fear that for most of you, however, this blog is about to get really boring. Yep, you got it. My urges to do nothing but sit and hold my pretty much actionless baby 90% of the day, and then talk about the little faces she makes all the rest of time will probably take over what I write about, too. You will probably be bombarded with pictures of her...her sleeping, her with her eyes open, her laying....all very exciting, to be sure! I can't help it, though. You will probably be pleased to know that right now I can't get my stupid new camera to work with my computer, so I can't download the pictures yet. I have, like, ten in mind already that I want on here, though. So I guess you can take this as fair warning to RUN if you want to!

Oh, and I also want to say that I have gravely misled you, and myself. All along I had planned to call my baby Taryn. Her given name is Taryn Reese Pitchford. In my mind, surely my baby would come out looking like a Taryn. However, upon first sight of her, I was wrong. Trey agrees, as do some other people I've asked. So, we have decided to call her Reese. Not only is it a cool name, and one which I'm equally as cool with, but it also comes with cute nicknames like Reesy, Reesy Cup, Reesy Reese, etc...(yes, we're already using them!). Of course, I worked hard to make the cute little Taryn on the wall of her room, and that kinda sucks. I figure, though, it is still her name, and by the time she can read I may have replaced it! As well, I have told you all to call her Taryn up to this point, and I'm sorry. So, as you go through your days now, talking non-stop about my wonderful new baby :) , please remember to substitute the name Reese with Taryn. Otherwise, you'll just get blank stares from those of us who have kept abreast.

I'll be back later, but right now Trey's having a conniption fit b/c I'm on here and he's having to....hold your breath....HOLD THE BABY!!!!! Yes, I'm an evil mom!

Anyway, I just wanted to post this pic of Taryn a few minutes ago. This is the dress that Mark and Karla gave her, and she wore it for her hospital pictures and the ride home today. It seemed so tiny when it wasn't on her, but as soon as it was on, it was HUGE! The hat looked like an umbrella on her, and the bloomers would have eaten her whole! Nonetheless, she looks AMAZING! Just thought you might like to see her...This one's for you, Mark and Karla!

Taryn was born about 2 minutes after I talked to Christi. She is 8 lbs 8 oz, brown hair and blue eyes. Christi sounds great. It was an easy labor, and she could barely feel a thing. Congratulations, Christi and Trey!!! I can't wait to meet you, Taryn!! TJ is going to be a great big brother!!

This is Julia. I just got off the phone with Christi. They are expecting Taryn to be born in about 10 minutes. I can't believe I was talking to her!!! It sounds like it is going well. She must be on some good drugs because she sounded so relaxed. I'll update later if I get another call.

Okay, guys, it's now officially 5:08 am. This is a devilishly early hour, and for those of you forced to ever be awake now, my heart goes out to you. I'm about to eat my pop-tarts and drink my milk, dry my hair, and head on out...I haven't heard anything from the hospital, so I'm hoping that means everything is cool.

Okay, here we go....Say a prayer for me...God, please let Taryn come out today! Please let it be quick and painless (ha ha!), and let Christi figure out a way to get pictures onto the computer stat!

Alrighty, hopefully I won't be back till tomorrow or later, but surely I'll have someone put stuff on here for me! Have a great day, and please read my post below...it's important. Later!

Okay, as far as I know, I'm going to the hospital tomorrow at 6 am to get induced. My goal is to be done around noon. I will let you know as soon as I can all about it. Hopefully there will be good news coming soon.

However, I have some not-so-good news right now. Gina's friend in Texas has a little boy who is turning two this weekend. He's been sick for a while now. His mom finally took him to the hospital yesterday, I think, and found out that he has a brain tumor. They are going to do surgery on him on Friday, and hopefully everything will go okay. Dire consequences could come otherwise. Soooo, what I need you all to do is stop what you're doing right now, please, and PRAY, PRAY, PRAY for him and his family, and that everything goes alright. Can you do that for me, please? I think his name is Gage, if that helps any. Also, pray for Gina. She's totally stressed about it, being that it's one of her really good friends from way back. Plus, she's got TJ tonight until the baby's born, so we've just added another stress (although a totally sweet and adorable one, still, a toddler!)! I know how absolutely terrified I would be if it were me in her situation, and I'm sure that even if you don't have kids, you can relate. So, please do this for me. If you don't pray, do whatever you do to feel better in these situations. Go to Gina's blog if you want more information.

Alrighty then, I'm gonna go now. It's 1 am, and I have to finish eating my dinner (yes, I'm just now eating, but I won't be able to tomorrow, so...!), and try to sleep (YEAH RIGHT!), so I can get up at 4:30. I hope you have a terrific day, and I'll be back soon enough to tell you great news!

Lately, I have been feeling, well, pretty. I didn't have the glow I was supposed to have from the fifth to seventh months of my pregnancy. I was a little upset about that. Now, at ten months, here I am finally feeling loverly. "I feel pretty, oh so pretty...." So, as I was looking at my new best friend, the bathroom mirror, today, I decided to try to take a picture of myself. That way I could let the world see how pretty I am! (yeah, so my face is all broken out, and it's its natural red self...it still has its good points!) So, for all of you out there just dying to see how beautiful I am, here you go:

I'm particularly in love with my eyes of late. I like that they're dark and that I can speak well with them (as if I had any problem speaking with my mouth!). So, there you go. If you disagree with me, well, I'm sorry...but, at least you got to see a small glimpse of my ultra cool cat picture in the background!

I will leave the house today. I didn't yesterday, and talk about a LONG day! I have the absolute most talkative two year old in the history of two year olds. Well, at least since I was two! He drove me NUTS! So, I need to get out and let him expend himself elsewhere and on someone else. I think yesterday was my punishment for not going to church...

Hey, if you see it on my blogroll, you should check out Go Fug Yourself. It's pretty funny. It's kinda mean...but hellahilarious!

Oh, and go say hi to Karla. She's home alone right now, as Mark's out of town, in the US, and she's probably a little lonely. Plus, check out Mark's, b/c he PROMISED he would post some pics he's going to take today.

Oh, and here's something new I'm sure you don't want to hear...I can feel the baby's head in my pelvis. It's kinda creepy. I mean, I have been able to feel a large ball for a few days now, since she dropped. Now, though, I can feel it actually pushing on my cervix. Does that make sense? Well, it does to me, and it could all be in my mind, but...Still, it's kinda cool. Trey told me if I want to have my moment, I can just call him at work and get him out of there, then say it's false labor. Hmmmmm....nah, not the same!

Alrighty, I guess I'll see you soon. I hope you have a wonderlicious (who knows!) day!

Okay, so my mood has changed a bit from yesterday (it actually got better not long after I wrote that last post). I just can't stay in a bad mood, which I suppose is good. It just makes life kinda suck, know what I mean?

Anyway, so I guess this baby is gonna come when she's good and ready. I should get used to that. After all, she is a girl (I REALLY hope so, at least!), and we all know that girls do what girls want to do, when they want to do it. I wouldn't expect that Trey could get me to do anything I didn't want to do until I was ready. So, at least I know she will fit right in! Of course, that doesn't give me hope as far as being the one in charge! How will I defer control of the house to a tiny, tiny person!? Poor Trey and TJ...I am still hoping that she decides to come on her own, today preferrably. I kinda just want to have that moment where I have to call Trey at work (on line 5), and he freaks out a little, and everyone goes "Awhooooo" to him, and he has to rush home. Then, where I call everyone else I know and get them up from whatever they were doing so they can all rush to Columbia to see her. That would be fun. Now that I have a set date, the suspense is not as strong, so I could handle a surprise...and that would be ideal! I've tried EVERYTHING I can do to try to induce my own labor, save castor oil (I'm not even going there!). I have to say, none of it has worked (obviously), but I am damn sore now all over (I won't go into details, but every part of my body has been "massaged" in some way or another in the last week!). We'll see, I guess...

Last night was kinda cool. We went to Finlay Park and saw Shark Tale on an outside screen, and got free popcorn and drinks and popsicles. It's this weekly thing some local church does where they play movies on Friday nights there. It's neat. I wanted to go last week, but it was cancelled b/c of rain. Last night it probably should have been...the grass was SOOOO mushy, and I got mud on my feet (I had flip-flops on! It was SOOOOO gross!). However, the weather was so nice. It was actually kinda cool outside (Trey got cold, wuss!). Even TJ seemed to enjoy it, of course we kept feeding him popcorn, so...I guess I'm glad that I didn't have the baby yesterday, b/c that's probably the only chance I'm going to get to go for a while, eh! Oh, and Gina and kids and her friend Karen and daughter came, too. I think they had a good time, too. Gina, did Blake find his bracelet?

Many, many thanks go out to Curlytrouble, who is TERRIFIC! She is hosting an internet baby shower for me today on her blog. Is that not the coolest thing! Please stop by and say hi. She totally made my day, which is really coming in handy right now. I might even be driven to shower and move today b/c I'm in such a good mood! Sometimes I wonder if blog friends aren't better than real friends? Maybe I should just go all-out intenet...Okay, maybe that's just taking it a little too far!

Wednesday, June 15th at 6 am. There. 2 centimeters dilated and 60% effaced, whatever. I am not happy. I want to cry all day and sulk, but nooooo, I can't. Trey has to go to work b/c his boss's wife is in the hospital. Whatever.

Please, while we're on the topic of gut feelings, if you have one concerning Taryn coming BEFORE Wed. of next week, I'd love to hear it.

Alrighty then....THE HOUSE IS GONE!!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!!! I NEVER HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT AGAIN!!!!!!

For those of you just coming into my little blogging world in the last few months, you may or may not know about my dear house. We live in an apartment in Columbia now, b/c Trey was transferred here a while back. However, once upon a time, we lived in a little town called Lancaster, SC. It SUCKED! However, we had a very nice house there, which we loved, and we let it suck us down. Upon realizing that the daily 1 1/2 hour drive to and from Columbia per person for work, one way, was killing us, we decided to use the gas money to pay rent and just live in Columbia. However, all of this time, we had our house up for sale (about 1 1/2 years now), and were having no luck at selling it. It wouldn't have been so bad, except that making a $1200/mo. house payment on top of a $700/mo. rent payment really wasn't working for us. Well, at least not if we wanted to eat! So, we opted to just stop paying it, and risk foreclosure. Needless to say, a buyer came to our rescue, and after a LONG and HARD road, we have now officially signed all the papers and paid all the money, and SOLD OUR HOUSE! I feel like a million pounds has been lifted off of my shoulders now, and we can finally really move on with our lives. I will say, though, it will be hard to buy a house again for a long time, after all of the trouble we have been through with this one. So, so long Canterbury house. Good riddens!

Oh, and on another up note about the house...As far as the money we had to pay goes, I think we may be alright. We didn't think about escrow. They told us we should get whatever was left in it sometime soon. I really don't think there will be much there, but I figure anything will help. Plus, I have some money that I can get (with a penalty, of course, but...) that will hopefully cover the rest. If we're lucky, it will even help with the month that I won't be getting any unemployment. See, I tell ya, God is SO AWESOME!

So, now I can move on to happier things....namely Taryn. It seems that at around 4 am this past morning, she decided to drop. I was immediately awakened with back pains and a sudden four thousand pound weight in my lower abdomen! Plus, I had a voracious appetite to clean...even more so than I have been lately! I got up and packed TJ an overnight bag in case, washed dishes, cleaned up around the house, and read my Mayo Clinic book about early labor. It seems that I was having many signs of early labor at the time...lower back pains, sudden "lightening" (baby dropped), small contractions in my upper abdomen (which later stopped, and haven't really been back but every now and then), and regular visits to the ladies' room. Later in the day, I started feeling quite sick, and in the early evening, I got a fever and started sweating like crazy. All of these symptoms are signals that labor is on its way. Here's the kicker, though. Everything says this is all good, however, it says these signs can last UP TO A WEEK! Ummm, not cool. I'm ready NOW! So, here I am at 1 am, waiting patiently. Thankfully, I go to the dr. tomorrow at 10 am, so I'm gonna hopefully get some kind of hope then. I am SO ready to meet Taryn!

Okay, one last thought, then I'll let you go (if you're still here!). I was talking to Julia on the phone earlier, and we were talking about gut instincts. I had one today, which I won't go into details about. It was very disturbing to me, and I was kinda shocked that I even thought what I did. I really had nothing to base this feeling on, but I just felt strongly about it when I thought it. Julia and I agreed that gut feelings like this come from somewhere, and come for a reason. I have to say, I think that my best trait in school was just following my gut when answering questions on tests and stuff. I got good grades, overall. Usually, if I listen to gut feelings like that, they are right a lot of the time. Trey agreed, also, that he finds his to be true most of the time. So this leads me to ask, do you ever get gut instinct feelings? If so, have you ever acted upon them, and what happened? The one I had today, like I said, I had nothing to back up, and wouldn't dare act upon. However, I just can't shake it, and it's really starting to make me think. I wanna hear from you...

Alrighty, hopefully I'll have some good news soon. I hope your day goes wonderfully as well. Talk to you soon!

So I asked in my survey how old you think Trey looks, b/c there's a story which I find quite funny to go along with it. Yesterday, he had to go to Sam's to buy fish for work. The cashier gave him a Heinekin box to carry it to his car in. If you've ever been to Sam's (or any warehouse type store), then you know they check your receipt as you leave the store. As he went to leave, the woman at the door kinda gave him this weird look, then kept looking at the box. She said, "You can't have this, you're not 21." Then she looked at him again, and said, "Are you 21? You're not 21, right?" Trey just gave her a funny look, and said, "I'm 28, why?" Finally, she looked inside, and saw that it was fish, and sent him on his way. Needless to say, I'm sure that Trey is now feeling so nice...and your ever-so-sweet guesses won't hurt once he sees them. I, on the other hand, will never post my picture, b/c you would all ask why Trey married a woman so old!

I need to ask you a favor, please. We are finally supposed to close on our house tomorrow. It seems as though in order to do so, we must come up with about $1000. Well, if you have been keeping up at all, that is just not something we have lying around. As a matter of fact, right now we are about $1000 down, as opposed to up. So, as miracles have it, we have managed to find some very generous benefactors to loan it to us until I can get my money out of my retirement to pay them back. I don't know how much is in there for me, so hopefully it will be enough (I only worked for a couple of years on retirement, so I know it's pretty much nothing). Anyway, I think it really sucks right now that so much crap is going on, that I really don't even have time to think about or be excited about the fact that I hope to have a baby coming in the near future. I think I kinda freaked my mom out today, b/c as much as this sucks, I'm really not going to lose sleep over it. I know that God knows what's best for us, and He will make sure everything works out alright. I've put it in His hands, and I'm letting him take over. All I'm asking of you right now is that you please, please, please pray that this works out alright, and that we are able to get past this junk so we can look on the bright side and be able to get excited about our up and coming miracle! I'm feeling a bit down right now, so maybe if you pray, I'll feel better or something...Thanks!

Alrighty then, thank you for all your help, and I'll see you later. Have a wonderful day!

Well, I had my unemployment appointment today. I was nervous about it, and rightfully so. It seems that my worst fears have come to life, and now I have the fun of trying to figure out how we're going to make it all work out. This is yet another moment I'm going to have to add to my IOU list to God, b/c it's gonna be all on Him to help me get out of this. I surely can't do it alone! Anyway, what I'm talking about is that they told me that once the baby is born, I'm to stop making claims. What this means, of course, is that I will no longer receive any money. Once the dr. gives me the go-ahead, I can start back up, but I'm guessing that's gonna be at least a month, if not more. So, now I've lost at least a month of income that was already just barely enough. What fun...and great timing, too. Hey, you need to add a person and start buying for them? Cool, we'll just take your money...If you've got any tips, please, bring them on!

Anyway, that was only one part of my day, and I'm sure we'll make it through, b/c God rocks like that, so I'm not as worried as I probably should be. Afterwards, I went to Gina's to get TJ (she was sweet to watch him for me during the appt.). I got there around 3, and ended up staying till 7. The sky let out, and I was in no mood to go and sit alone with TJ at home, so she graciously allowed me to share her company for the majority of the afternoon. What's even better is that she MADE US DINNER! Did I mention how much Gina rocks!? We had yummy corn, shish-cabobs (sp?), cornbread (the best I've ever had!), and she gave me a creme' brulee (sp?) that Wesley made....SOOOOO good, all of it! I was spoiled. I say every rain day I might just have to "be in the neighborhood". Yeah, I'm sure Gina would really appreciate that! What's even better is that she showed me how to make cornbread...and it's SOOOOO easy. I'm going to make it tomorrow, I'm so excited. Then I'm going to make it the next day, and the next day, and....Thanks, Gina, for making my afternoon worthwhile. Otherwise, I think I would have ended up in front of the tv trying to get TJ to stop talking for a while.

Did I mention TJ? When we left Gina's, he did not stop talking for ONE SECOND the entire time until I put him to bed. Not one second! Then, after I put him to bed, he heard Trey call, and immediately ran out and grabbed the phone from me, and talked Trey's ear off until he walked in the door. Then he talked his ear off till Trey finally threw him in his bed and slammed the door! He didn't even have a nap today, and my guess is his thought was that if he stopped talking for even a second, he would fall asleep! Trey even admitted he's worse than me (and that's saying WAAYYYYYY more than you realize! I am not known for being a quiet person!).

Well, I guess I better go now. I hope you have a great day! Talk to you soon!

So this woman at Books a Million showed me this book yesterday that I really want. However, I don't want to pay the $17 it costs to have it. Ha ha! I just found it at Target, and for only $12! I have to return some stuff there, and I can use that money! Hooray!...Oh, so anyway, it looks like a really cool book, well, magazine. It's called Becoming: The New Testament , and it's basically the new testament, but written in a magazine form. Like, instead of sitting down and trying to digest reading the Bible, which, for me, is basically impossible, you can read it in parts like a magazine. There are little beauty sections, romance sections and the like, just like a real magazine. However, they talk about how you can be beautiful as related to God's word, and stuff like that. I read some of it yesterday while I was at the store, while TJ played with the train set they have, and it was pretty cool. I started at the beginning, and I just started reading the first "article". It was basically a summed up, but not too summed up, version of who Jesus came from (it still listed ALL the people in his family tree), how Joseph thought Mary was cheating on him, his birth, how Herod wanted him killed, how Joseph hid him in Egypt, how John baptized him, and some more...that's as far as I got. But hey, before yesterday, I really didn't know all that stuff. I mean, I knew some of the basics, but...and I learned all this from reading for about ten minutes! How cool is that! I don't know about you, but we keep magazines in the bathroom for "educational time". I thought it might be cool to get rid of all the skanky girly magazines and replace them with this one. It's just really cool how I could read it, understand it, enjoy it, and actually get it. I've been telling myself forever that I'm going to read the Bible, but as hard as I try, I just can't do it.

Oh, I also bought TJ a Bible, too. I went in the hopes of getting the one that Echo bought for her kids, but I neglected to bring the name of it with me. Did you know that there are 5 BILLION children's Bibles! I stood there FOREVER trying to figure out which one to get. Some had too many words, some not enough. Some had too many pictures, some not enough. You get my drift. I really wanted it to be the basic whole Bible, so I wouldn't have to add on later (although I doubt very seriously he'll want to read this one when he's 10!). I opted for The Rhyme Bible Storybook for Toddlers. It's REALLY concise, but it has cute pictures and short little rhymes on each page, so TJ will actually pay attention and understand. Last night we read about how God made the earth--I think that was about four pages long with four lines on each--and Noah's Ark. I thought it funny that it was never called an Ark, just a boat, but then I figured TJ wouldn't have gotten it otherwise. He seemed really excited about how all the animals got to ride on the big boat, and how rainy it was. I like his age now, b/c we can talk about the pictures in his books, and sometimes I can even get him to try to figure out what's going to happen next. Anyway, I like this little Bible. I figure if nothing else, I can read it to TJ, and then I can learn all the important stuff from the Bible, too! I mean, surely a toddler book will tell me all the stuff I really need to know, right!

Wow, didn't think I could go on that long about Bible shopping. I guess I'll cut out here. I hope you all have a great day, and I'll see you soon!

Oh my goodness! Can you believe I get to have a moment like this all over again! Whenever I get mad and wonder why I went and got prego again, I think of times like this. Is this not the most precious child in the world!

I am posting not so much b/c I have anything to say, but b/c I have to. It appears that if I do not post regularly, people start thinking things lately. I would not want someone to get confused and think things, b/c there's nothing to be thought. Yes, that's right...SHE'S NEVER COMING OUT!!! Rest assured, I talked to K8 tonight, and if she does ever decide to come out, I am to call her as soon as I go into labor, and she will be my up-to-the-minute blogger on the scene (sorta) to let people know what's up. That is, of course, unless she's at the beach, or out with a friend, or something more exciting than blogging for me...

I can't really think of anything that TJ said today which was that exciting to tell. Well, I thought it was kinda cute when he walked up to someone at the store and asked, "Do you know the muffin man?"

Okay, I had to go lay down with TJ for a few minutes so he'd go back to sleep. Apparently, he's too scared to lay in his own bed tonight, but can't tell me why. This leads me to a question, which may or may not be related to this incident. So the other day I found out that TJ was watching a movie while at someone else's house. This movie was one of the Chucky movies, Child's Play, I don't know which one. I was kinda bothered to hear this. I mean, alright, fine, he's only two, and I'm sure he has no understanding of the concept of the movie, or that it is even scary. However, he has no concept of what the word damn means, either, and yet, when I say it, he has no qualms at repeating it right back to me, and can even remember the word days later! So, it worries me a little that he was allowed to watch a movie about a killing toy. Even if he doesn't understand the whole concept of death and murder, he can understand the reactions of the people around him to it. For instance, when I see something funny, I laugh. TJ has no idea why it's funny, or even that it is, but yet, he laughs right along (I always think that's SOOO cute!). An example of this happened the other day when someone in front of me slammed on their brakes, and I was forced to slam on mine. I yelled out (or something like that) in a kinda freaked out scared way, and consequently TJ busted out crying, b/c my reaction scared him so much. Sooooo, I would then be left to assume that even though he doesn't understand that someone is dying or whatever, if someone around him reacts in a way that says they're freaked out by what they saw on tv, then he will remember that and associate it with what he saw on tv. TJ has nightmares all the time about little stuff, like when he went on for days about Nana's car being broken. He was pretty upset about that, and in his mind it was very vivid, even though, again, he had no idea what he was even so worried about. What really bothers me is that this movie isn't just any scary movie, it's about a TOY that kills people! Ummm, hello, he has a room FULL of toys! I don't know, maybe I'm over-reacting. Again, I figure he doesn't really get it anyway, but at the same time, it still bothers me a little that he was watching a scary movie. What sucks even more is that of all the scary movies in the world, that one is chock-full of profanity. I have been working VERY hard on controlling my mouth, and that is just so he doesn't hear such language. To have him hear it on tv doesn't help. What do you think? I have a feeling you will probably agree with me, but I'd really love to hear from you if you don't, too. This being a mom thing is not so easy at times, and being able to hear all sides of an argument helps.

Alrighty, you guys have a great day, and I'll talk to you later! I think that really cheesy stripper movie, Showgirls, is on. That should be something easy enough to fall asleep to!

First off, TJ's quote of the day: He was in the bath tub, and he did something wonderful (as usual). I said, "How'd you get so smart?" He said, "How'd I get so hot!" I asked him if that's what the girls all say. He said, "Yep, that's what the girls say!" Very scary....

Let me ask you if you've ever known a person like this...A big downer. I think there are two kinds of people like this, or at least that's what I know.

One type is like this: They never have anything good to say. If you tell them good news, the first thing out of their mouth is something bad associated with it. For instance, I say, "Hey, I just won the lottery!" In response, "Ohhh, well you know they're going to take at least half of it in taxes." Have you had this kind of conversation before? I mean, so what! I'm happy, and it's a great moment for me...let me live in the now. Later I'll think about all the bad stuff, but for now let me be happy. It could even be something small..."Hey, guess what, I found my lost earring." "Well, you better make sure not to lose the other one now." I dunno, that kind of stuff just brings me down. I would just love to hear, "Great! Now you can wear them with that cool outfit you have," or something like that (mind you, I don't wear earrings, so this is purely hypothetical, but you get the point, right?).

Then there's the other type: This is the person who thrives on controversy and problems. If there is not something bad going on, then they find a way to start something. I think of gossip with this situation, and a lot of bad-talking. I will admit, I'm very prone to fall right into the gossip trap, and I sometimes find myself smack in the middle of these kind of situations. I hate it, though. I have had to seriously distance myself from people like this b/c I find myself becoming evil if I don't. Here's an example...Everyone in the friend group is happy with each other. One day, one of them says to another, "Have you heard from friend so-and-so? She said her husband was being a jerk, and I hope everything's alright." Now, the friend who just heard this runs off and tells everyone that the other friend is having marital problems and is getting a divorce. Oh, that just irks me! I know people like this, and they go out of their way to start trouble and twist reality, so they can have something to tell people about and get people upset. Do you know people like this? It's a real downer. What's worst is that sooner or later these kind of people are going to run out of people to knock and find fault in, and will eventually turn on you. The next thing you know you're a bad guy just for being yourself! I hate that! What total downers!

I understand that the world is made of all types of people, and that we need everyone for a reason. Geez, though! I could really do w/o the downers. As if life isn't hard enough as it is!

Karla TOTALLY hooked me up! I love her! I am such a lucky girl! I have decided that Taryn will now come home in this dress instead...How cute will that be! The outfit is too cute, too! We promise to make Ava proud and try to look half as cute as she would have in it!

There was also a book with little fuzzy things to touch, but TJ won't let me have it back, so....I love this Kolik stuff..it's called Gripe Water. I'm guessing it's like Mylicon Drops...Everything's got French on it...How cool is that! Aren't these COOL books!

Karla, I hope you don't mind this, but I feel the time has come, and I must steal a prior post idea from you...

Okay, I want to get this damn baby out of my body now. Julia has stated, after finding out when she called tonight that I was not in fact in labor, as her gut mistakenly told her, that she thinks Taryn will come on Thursday, after I apparently go into labor Wed. night at 11:45 pm (I say this time, b/c she said Taryn will not be here till Thursday, and I don't want to be in labor more than 20 minutes or so....). Trey's mom says she thinks maybe I'll go into labor on Tuesday at 10 or so. That would mean she'd be here by 10:20ish. Okay, I can do that.

If you get my drift, I would like to know when you think Taryn will be here. She is due June 10th, next Friday, but I really don't want to wait that long. So, if you want to stay my friend, don't say anything past next Friday! I figure one of you has to be some kind of prophet, and can tell me when. A homeless lady at the park today told me she would come this week. I'm going with that...surely God would speak to me through her. Maybe if you say similar times, I will just do an average or something, and figure up the time. Okay, if you can guess the right time, you win a prize! That will make it work, right! Okay, so let me know what you think....

Today SUCKS! I'm sure that going on and on about it won't help at all, but hey, why not. What else constructive do I have to do?

I would love to tell you all about my wonderful house closing yesterday, and how we are now free from the cursed place. However, I feel it would be wrong to lie to you like that and make up a story. "What," you say, "you didn't close yesterday?" No, as a matter of fact we didn't. We did, however drive all the way to Lancaster and waste an entire day. Then we left TJ to spend the night, as we were told that we would close today instead. Well, that's not happening, either. So, now my son is in LA w/no clean clothes, not enough diapers, and Trey is missing his day off w/his son. Will we close tomorrow? Perhaps, of course Trey has to work, but....

So, I went to my dr. appt. today. Not a single thing has changed. Still one centimeter dilated, and "soft"..."Oh, look, I can feel her head! Can you feel it bouncing?" Ummm, yeah I can feel it bouncing...now can you take her out of me?!!! Nope, sorry Christi, you're not favorable to be induced yet, so we will not set up a date for you. Hey, that's okay, b/c the day I wanted, next Tuesday, I found out that I have to go to unemployment for an appointment. Don't worry, we'll set up another appointment for you next Friday. Surely you'll be really pissy by then, and we'll just tell you the same thing again. It appears that all the primrose oil and sex you've been having haven't done a SINGLE THING! Plus, they said she is very likely to be much bigger than TJ was. For joy! Oh yeah, well I don't care if she comes out or not anymore. She can stay in till she's fifteen for all I care.

It's barely past noon yet. However, there has been one highlight to my day so far. I went after my appt. to the labor and delivery part of the hospital. It seems that last night, at the exact moment I was showing Trey where to go when I have the baby, my friends Wendy and Randy from Sunday School were having their baby, Ethan. He is 8 lbs. 13 oz., and just totally adorable! He didn't like being all bundly, and he has the cutest little ball of a chin and round face, and a TON of hair (way more than his dad!)! I opted not to hold him, as I'm really freaked out by the whole idea (ummm, geez, that could be bad!) of tiny babies right now. Wendy looks great, and Randy is just pleased as punch about his new kid. You could tell he was having little bouts of excitement about holding his new kid! Pastor Jones was there this morning, and Randy told him he'd see him at church Sunday. Pastor Jones laughed and said, "No you won't." I did, too. I reassured him we won't see him for at least a couple weeks. Of course, my goal is not to see the church at all for a while, but I'm quite sure that I will be there, not with bells on, on Sunday. Grumble, grumble, grumble....Anyway, Wendy's baby is SO cute!

Well, I suppose that's it for now. I could go on, but why? I think you've gathered that I'm in a bad mood already, and I certainly don't want to bring you down anymore. I've spent the morning praying to God that he will help get me out of this slump, but I guess He's leaving it in my hands....Maybe I'll cheer up later. I hope your day is tons better than mine so far, and I'll see you later.