Barcelona president Josep Maria Bartomeu has revealed that that he wants the club’s Argentine star Lionel Messi to remain linked to the club forever and that he plans to sit down with the forward soon to discuss extending his contract.

“It is understandable to say that the office of the First Lady has nothing to do with the epileptic supply of electricity to students’ environment,” a statement by the NYCN read, “but it would have been wise and safer if she had taken time to address and appease the agitating students.”