An Open Letter to My Guy Friends on Why We Need New Rules for Our Flirtationships

I know you've become accustomed to me as being the single girl you can bro-down with—the one with whom you can talk about sex, flirt and discuss girls. I’ve been friends with most of you for a long time, but now that I’ve met someone, I gotta make some changes. And that means drafting a few new rules to turn our flirtationships back into friendships.

Let's get straight to the point. (I numbered the rules so that you could refer back to it easily—and so you could see how totally doable this is).

1. Sexting has now been officially deemed "uncool." I get most of the time you're kidding or being cute when you text me, “What are you wearing?” and “Do you miss me?” but I think I would lose my mind if I saw a similar message on Soul Mate’s phone. Even if he understands that you and I are close, it’s just not worth it—especially while the relationship is in its beginning phase. This is when we need to build trust.

2. Please don’t tell me what a douche you think SM is, or that I could do better. It doesn’t help one bit, and I’m gonna get royally pissed. And it’s not going to make me break up with him. I’ll just stop wanting to talk to you.

3. I can’t always answer your calls the way I used to, and I’m definitely not going to give you the dirt on our sex life. So stop asking.

Now that I found someone I have to make sacrifices. I can’t think of myself without respecting his feelings as well. It doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I will always cherish our friendships and hope that in the end, you’ll end up friends with SM, too. We just need to dial back a bit. I don't want to eff this one up. It means too much. We good?

Love always, Ariane

Any of you experience having to rewrite the rules of a friendship when you start dating someone new? Are you a guy's girl or girl's girl? How do you navigate your male friendships when you're in a relationship? Do you think guys and girls can be friends without it upsetting their partners?