Pornography gets a bad rap from many corners, but its use among couples can sometimes lead to better sex in their relationship. This is certainly not true for all couples, especially those in which one of the partners has strongly held negative opinions about pornography. However, for most couples, adding in a touch of porn can be a plus. (Guys, of course, better maintain proper penis health, so that they’re in good shape to handle the better sex that can result!)

Be selective.

Not every X-rated video is going to be appropriate for a couple to watch together and use to enhance their sexual relationship. Much depends on the personal preferences of the people involved. For example, a couple that enjoys bondage may appreciate certain videos that would be a turn-off for another couple.

So, while each member of a couple has his or her own preferences, here are two things to consider when choosing an erotic viewing experience.

Male fantasies may not be female fantasies. Many guys really enjoy watching another guy get serviced by a roomful of beautiful babes. They may get excited by shots of penises ejaculating all over a woman’s face. However, these may not be the same kinds of situations that a woman finds enjoyable.

Story and character may matter. While no one watches a pornographic video for the intricate plot and insight into character, many women do prefer a movie in which there is at least a nod toward story and character. A video made up of nothing but couples engaging in intercourse may interest a woman less than one in which a woman and a man meet and reveal a little about themselves before falling into bed for a lengthy sexual gymnastics routine.

How to use pornography

Once a film has been selected and a couple begins viewing it, how should they make the most of the experience?

- Engage, but don’t immerse. This should be a participatory experience, so while watching is important, a man needs to make sure he doesn’t get so wrapped up in the video that he ignores his partner. Make eye contact with her during the film, kiss and caress, etc.

- Talk. Pornography is not great art, so it’s quite appropriate to talk with one’s partner during the experience. Discussing what is being done and how excited one is by the goings-on is crucial.

- Imitate. If a particular position or activity speaks to a couple, they should definitely try it out as they watch - or if it’s complicated, store it away to practice it later.

- Innovate. A couple doesn’t have to stick with what the couple onscreen is doing. If they feel like engaging in their own brand of sex, or if they start out imitating the couple onscreen but go in a totally new direction, so much the better!

- Ignore. At some point, many couples get so wrapped up in themselves that they forget about the video. That’s exactly what should happen.

- Reflect. Afterwards, it’s a good idea to reflect on the experience. What things in the video did each partner like and why? What kind of ideas and thoughts came up while watching? What did each think of the activities they engaged in while watching?

One of the first keys to better sex is communication, so freely talking about the experience with pornography is essential. Also key is for the man to keep his organ in proper health so that he can better enjoy the experience. Using a top-notch penis health crème(health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) can help in this area. Often, viewing pornography leads to rather rough sex, which can de-sensitize the penis. Using a crème with acetyl L-carnitine, a neuroprotective ingredient, can help in this area. It’s also ideal if the selected crème contains L-arginine, an ingredient that boosts nitric oxide production, which in turn keeps the blood flowing more easily to the penis - something that any man benefits from!