Not For Metrosexuals or Euro Trash, The Duke Cannon Supply Co. Caters To The Manliest of Men.

I'd never heard about the Duke Cannon Supply Co. until my friend Joel posted one of their "Big Ass Bricks Of Soap" on Facebook. Intrigued and amused by the "Smells like naval supremacy." line and the great bold package design, I did some research. I was thrilled to find their site peppered with a great sense of humor as well as some very fun, albeit über-Macho, Military-inspired grooming products for men.

The Chicago-based company's products make you smell and feel laden with testosterone , while also helping out military veterans. A portion of the proceeds directly supports Veteran causes. For more details on that, go here.

above: Their manifesto of sorts, as it appears on their home page.

With legit military guidance and an industrial design flavor, the brand offers 5 different Duke Cannon Soaps (there's even a set available with a hatchet), two shampoos and shaving cream. The copy on the packaging is smart and witty and not for pansies or those who expect to be pampered.

I had to include their clever descriptions along with their product images for you.

BIG ASS BRICKS OF SOAP

This soap product is designed to meet the high standards of hard working men who want to get clean & smell good without using feminine shower gels and accessories. This product is modeled after the rough cut, "brick" style of soap used by GIs during the Korean War and is manufactured in the same plant that was the primary supplier of military soap for over 20 years.

Big Ass Brick Of Soap - Black Bar 3-pack
Smells like accomplishment.
This new soap product from Duke cannon Supply Co. is designed to meet the high standards of hard working men. The incredibly masculine scent of bergamot and black pepper evokes the feeling of drinking a fine scotch in a wood-paneled den. Simply put, it is the scent of accomplishment. Like all Duke Cannon soap products, each brick is large (10 oz.) and contains steel cut grains for maximum grip.

Big Ass Brick of Soap - Green Bar 3-pack
Smells like Victory.
The Duke Cannon Supply Co. Big ass brick of soap is designed to meet the high standards of hard working men who want to get clean and smell good without using feminine shower gels and accessories. True to its name, our soap is big (10 oz.) and will last much longer than the chick-sized bars in your local grocery. It also smells awesome (clean, fresh scent) and contains steel cut grains for maximum gripability. If you enjoy activities like drinking american beer or using power tools, then frankly, this is the only soap meant for you.

Big Ass Brick Of Soap - White Bar 3-pack
Smells like productivity
For the early rising man who leads a life of productivity, duke cannon created a soap with a hint of menthol to cool the skin and wake him up so he can get things done. This new superior grade product from duke cannon has a fresh mint smell and contains steel cut grains for maximum grip. Net wt. 10 oz.

Big Ass Brick of Soap - Blue "Naval Supremacy" 3-Pack
Smells like naval supremacy.
Introducing the latest home run from Duke Cannon. While other blue soaps are named "Ocean Force" or "Summer Mist," our blue soap is the only one big enough to be named "Naval Supremacy." With a package sporting the official colors of the U.S. Navy, this superior grade product weighs in at a hefty 10 oz. and has steel cut grains for maximum grip.

Duke Cannon Heavy Duty Hand Soap 3 Pack
Duke Cannon doesn't spend all day typing emails on a laptop. And he damn well sure has never gotten a manicure. His hands build tangible things like v8 engines and two story decks. And hard work makes hands dirty. That's why duke cannon offers a heavy duty hand soap, a rough cut brick formulated with pumice to clean the hands of hard working men. It is modeled after heavy duty soap supplied to GIs during the Vietnam war. Like all duke cannon bricks of soap, this one weighs in at a hefty 10 oz., almost 2x the size of other pumice soaps.

Duke Cannon "El Cuatro" 4 Ct. Variety Pack
We understand it can be difficult to choose among victory, productivity, accomplishment, and naval supremacy. Hell, they all sound good, and they certainly are. Therefore, hedge your bet by purchasing this 4 ct. "El Cuatro" variety pack, featuring one each of our outstanding big ass bricks of soap. You will never get a better smelling package in the mail.

Limited Edition U.S. Military Field Box Gift Pack
Back by popular demand. While clown soaps offer a free loofa, The Duke Cannon Gift Pack offers a Variety Pack of 5 Big Ass Bricks of soap (one of each variety + one heavy duty hand soap), and an authentic Military Field Box used to carry .30 Cal Ammunition. These cans are reusable and watertight and they make for great hunting/camping storage cans or the greatest lunch pail ever. And, as a nominal bonus, we are offering a free Stanley Screwdriver, proudly made in the USA like all Duke cannon products
NOTE: CANS ARE IN USED CONDITION, AND THEREFORE HAVE DENTS AND SCRATCHES.

The American Soap and Hatchet Set

Duke Cannon’s American Soap & Hatchet Set is to be used by workers, explorers, and craftsmen—NOT FOR CLOWNS. Each item has been built for general purpose use or combat, as needed:
• Duke Cannon Hatchet made of razor sharp US steel forged to genuine American hickory
- Color: Stealth
- Specs: 19oz head weight, 18” handle length
- Each Duke Cannon Hatchet is hand crafted, so no two are exactly the same
• Carhartt IFD Cold-Weather Skull Cap. Protects against all elements. Not to be worn by guys named Skyler when the weather reads above 50 degrees. IMPORTED FROM DETROIT.
All Five Big Ass Bricks of Duke Cannon soap:
- Smells Like Victory
- Smells Like Accomplishment
- Smells Like Productivity
- Smells Like Naval Supremacy
- Heavy Duty Hand Soap

HAIR PRODUCTS:

Duke Cannon 2-in-1 Hair Wash - Hard-Working Clean

Duke Cannon has little patience for skinny jeans, veggie burgers, or products of inferior quality. His new Hard-Working Clean 2-in-1 Hair Wash has been engineered with only Superior Grade ingredients:
- Protein for strength
- Vitamin E for antioxidant protection
- Vitamin B5 for conditioning
- No harsh sulfates or parabens
Duke Cannon 2-in-1 Hair Wash is for men of higher taste, not clowns.

Duke Cannon 2-in-1 Hair Wash - Thickening Formula

For "News Anchor Thick" Hair
Duke Cannon has no interest in salads, male capri pants, or products of inferior quality. His new Thickening Formula 2-in-1 Hair Wash has been engineered with Superior Grade ingredients:
- Protein for strength
- Tea Tree Oil and Menthol to wake you up
- Vitamin B5 for conditioning
- No harsh sulfates or parabens
Duke Cannon 2-in-1 Hair Wash is for men of higher taste, not clowns.

SHAVING CREAM

Superior Grade Shaving Cream

If left untouched for three days, Duke Cannon's beard would grow a beard. Therefore, he needs a shaving product that will clean him up without the burn. His barbershop formula shaving cream is engineered with only Superior Grade ingredients:
- Aloe Vera for relief
- Shea Butter for hydration
- Macadamia Nut Oil for the closest possible shave
- Calendula Extract for recovery
Duke Cannon Superior Grade Shaving Cream is for men of higher taste, not clowns.

As if buying these fun and unique products weren't enough, they offer customer 'rewards'- very macho types of items. As they hilariously state on their site:"If you buy lots of Duke Cannon Supply Company products, you get free stuff. Not stupid crap you don't need. Instead, we offer items that are Duke Cannon certified -- actual things he likes and uses. So save your UPCs, and when you have enough, email us at the address below, tell us what you want, and we'll send you some useful stuff."