Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Good Grief Layout 3

So if anyone has been reading this you’ll know my Dear Father-In-Law passed a year ago. It’s been a long tough year. I go back and forth in my emotions about it. Most days are pretty mellow, I miss him but I can manage. And then there are days I cry at everything. Well this month’s challenge at Good Grief was to tell a story without photos. (These are not my first layouts for Good Grief Challenges about Dad.) And I had the perfect kit for it. Marta van Eck’s Don Quijote. (Please note: I’m not on her CT, sometimes I do scrap with kits that are not CT requirements.) It’s a lovely but odd kit with beautiful flowers and moody dark backgrounds, but it’s the windmills that sold me on this kit for this project. Dad always called my DMIL his “little dutchmen” why it wasn’t dutch girl I’ll never understand, but anyway I’m getting off point. So with the windmill and the beautiful flowers which I thought at first were tulips, but are in fact poppies I created a sweet tribute that I could get some emotions out and accurately portray my feeling with. And the horses, horses always make me think of Dad.

Journaling says: Dear Dad, A year has slipped by since you left us so suddenly. I can't tell you how much I miss you, because I have never felt like this before. It often hits me out of seemingly nowhere. Somedays it does not hurt to remember, but most days it does. Somedays I hate you for that, and then I get mad at myself for that. There is nothing to hate you for, you would not have left if you had been given the choice. You worked your whole life, day after tiring day, rarely complaining, crappy farmers wages. But you made sure Mom would be taken care of. I just wish I had appreciated you more when I had the chance, and that is just a shame, I miss you so much.

I like this challenge because I’m in a phase right now of writing letters I have no intention of sending. It’s a nice outlet for my emotions. I can express those feelings we were told all our lives that nice girls shouldn’t feel or dare speak about and it helps me through a lot of things.