So over this: D.C. "Housewives" recap (Reunion, pt. 2, Oct. 21)

Housewives, what do you want?

The White House has declared that your co-stars, the Salahis, were not invited to the state dinner; the Congressional Black Caucus has confirmed they were kicked out of that gala; law enforcement officials have denied their fantastical claim that Mary Amons's daughter was implicated in an FBI investigation.

There seemed to be a lot of banging-heads-against-walls in tonight's final "reunion" show for "The Real Housewives of D.C.," as the other Housewives -- and host Andy Cohen -- confronted Tareq and Michaele about, well, everything, and got little or no satisfaction. It was a lot of this: We provided wine to the party! The vendor says you didn't! Yes we did! ... That's not your house! Yes it was. Well, you didn't own it! ... The Secret Service didn't kick you out of the CBC dinner! Yeah, well, some other security guards kicked you out! No they didn't! Yes they did!

No matter how much evidence of unappealing doings they presented, they just couldn't get those darn Salahis to own up, and it seemed to drive the other cast members crazy. Lynda Erkiletian declared the whole thing a "goat rodeo" to end all goat rodeos. Cat Ommanney stormed off the set. Mary Amons complained the Salahis "hijacked our show." Well, ladies, you just let them do it all over again.

There were a couple of good lines. One of them actually came from Tareq! Explaining why he libeled Lolly Amons on national TV by implicating her in a non-existent FBI investigation into the alleged theft of polo gear: "Mr. Cabernet and Mr. Merlot helped me bring it up." Haha! Okay, maybe that's not very funny at all. But then there was Rich Amons, scolding him for not apologizing: "You put my daughter's name with the FBI, and you can't say, 'Hey, I wore my ass-hat that night' "? Oh, maybe you had to be there. How about this one: Lynda saying she threw water not scotch, at Tareq, after he threw wine in her face during the press tour: "I would never waste scotch on you, never ever."

This kind of talk seemed to inspire Michaele, who, after nine episodes of trying to project saintly positive-energy vibes, attempted some hair-tossing zingers straight out of Heather Locklear's "Melrose Place" playbook: "Cat, where are you living? I hear you're living in Lynda's basement!" and, "I don't think President Obama and his office would ever uninvite you [from the White House Christmas party] -- maybe your husband uninvited you!" Huh?

Andy Cohen, usually so unctuous and snarky, did an admirable job channeling the madness and seeking the truth. Bravo allowed the cameras to run during Tareq's Lolly libeling, but here Cohen made up for it, pressing Tareq on the evidence -- a comment on someone's Facebook photo -- and calling it bogus.

Which led to a fun little moment. "The Washington Post said she was not implicated," Cohen said. Tareq scoffed, as if this was plainly ridiculous, "The Washington Post said that we crashed the White House state dinner!" Everyone jumped. "As did every other paper in the country!!!" yelled Stacie Turner. Thank you, Stacie.

Oh, about that White House state dinner? "It's a series of misunderstandings but it wasn't caused by the Salahis," Tareq explained patiently. "It was caused by members of the government."

The Salahis added a couple new twists to their evolving yet unwavering insistence that oh-yeah-they-really-WERE-invited-no-matter-what-the-hosts-say. Tareq said he called their Pentagon contact's office to ask where guests were supposed to arrive -- and her assistant told him! Michaele explained that they left before dinner "because they had lentil soup." They both referred vaguely to an "off the record" guest list. Andy, unimpressed, kept calmly returning to their correspondence with the Pentagon official they were pressing for an invitation. "This e-mail to me is not a clear invitation," he said. "I can understand how someone who is optimistic might say, 'We've got a shot at this.'" Ultimately, Andy diagnosed them with "a combination of optimism, delusion and chutzpah of the highest level." Yeah, to their faces! And he steadfastly refused to get snarled in the circles of double talk, down to the last minute, as Tareq insisted that the congressional inquiry into the breach was inspired by concerns about Bravo, "whether this was an audition, a publicity stunt." No, said Andy, "it was about whether you snuck into the White House."

So, yeah! Andy Cohen wins! He finally got the Salahis to admit ... well, he didn't succeed at any of that either. But he stayed on point, and he didn't lose his cool, and he didn't join the yelling.

I'm done. If you want to continue watching "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills," you will have to do so without my fact-checking assistance. Did Camille Grammer really tell Kelsey to cast Patricia Arquette in "Medium"? I have no idea. You're on your own.

I'm up a little late....but Reliable Source girls that is the funniest thing you ever wrote regarding this whole debacle. You seemed to be really hitting your stride. Too bad we need to move on now (maybe).

So over this - we can only hope so....thankfully it appears Andy Cohen (take that Matt Lauer) is fairly displeased with them.

"You hijacked our show!" Yes, the Salahis did, with lots of help from Bravo. DC was not as entertaining as the other RH shows but would have been dismal without the Salahis. A show starring the Salahis resurrecting Oasis would be hysterical if you kept the other housewives but, in addition, showcased the locals and Tareq's mother. The Salahis are the train wreck that you can't look away from, what reality TV is all about.

This is the first time that I haven't felt even a twinge of sympathy for the Salahis. Their only redeeming moment was Michaele telling Tareq to apologize for throwing the wine. A nice touch, actually, but too little too late.

I regret that I’ll never find out whether she was entirely as evil as he or was “merely” willfully complicit for looking the other way while he performed his unsavory hack jobs on others. But the clock has run out and so it’s time to stop wondering about such things.
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Another thing that struck me last night was that a week later (in real time) Andy Cohen asked the Salahis some of the exact same questions on his Watch What Happens live show. His flat reaction to their answers makes even more sense now. It's like he was thinking, “whoa you had a whole week to come up with a better answer and you're still shoveling that lame BS?! Unbelievable.”
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Last week's showdown between Andy and Lynda about Tareq coming out with the other busbands was the bomb! Andy is The Man, the guy who decides if any of them have a season two. But Lynda didn't back down at all. I just love her.

And yet, naturally, Andy got his way. Now that's the “part two” discussion I want to see in the Bravo bonus clips...
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But you know what I really loved about part two of the reunion?

Closure.

The Salahis were so completely transparent this time, there's really nothing left to talk about. No more need to listen to them attempt to spin sh!t into gold in TV interviews while some cowardly talking head pretends to give them the benefit of the doubt. No more of Tareq's "look for a major announcement soon." No more reason to listen to their side of any story at all.

For the Salahis’ it's now come down to paid appearances at bowling alleys and low class bars.

And for the rest of us, a return to our regularly schedule lives, already in progress. Hobbies. Think hobbies!

If charges are not pressed for either events (Black Caucus/White House)which the Salahi's sneaked into, they will have won on both with their defenses "WE WERE INVITED."

I watched the series (unaware that I had tuned into it one evening) and I was 'hooked' - mostly because Michaele seemed like an aboration and I had already read the story of how they 'crashed/sneaked' into the State Dinner. The Reunion Part 2 cleared up nothing for me, except to realize Washington, D.C./Bravo/viewing audiences have been "Salahized".

Check out my exhaustive (exhausting?) article on the Salahis’ use of fake identities/sock puppets to attack their enemies back in the pre-Bravo era. As always, I wrote it too quickly, but I’m proud of it overall:

Then check out this piece, not written by me, describing a chilling private threat made to a woman with MS who posted skeptical information on the Salahi’s Facebook page. She posted her info on Thurs and Friday last week. Late Saturday afternoon, her comments were deleted and seconds later she received the following private message from David Mortz, who as most of you know, is widely believed to be Tareq’s alter-ego:

David Mortz:
Karma is a bitch.
I will find you.

Aimee:
Yes it is and it will knock on your door before mine.

David Mortz:
Looks like Facebook already knocked on your door bitch... now go
crawl back in your pathetic little hole of a miserable life and
hopefully die sooner than later.
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http://deathby1000papercuts.com/2010/10/real-housewives-of-dc-reunion-sockpuppets-fake-identities-and-the-mysterious-david-mortz/

Whoa. If that was Tareq, he is totally losing it. But Aimee is my new hero for not backing off from a bully. Can you even imagine what it felt like for a woman to receive that message from a man she doesn't know?

Note, btw, that the “info from MJ” mentioned in that second article was actually a set of informal research notes sent to me by our very own growler55!

If not for growler, I would never have bothered to write that sock puppet article after posting a draft of it here months ago. But having posted about them herself ages ago she thought it was cool and played around with tracking down a few more, so then I got back into the swing of it. Thanks, growler!

The series has ended but real world is stuck with the likes of the Salahi's. Unfortunately they will continue.Hopefully your reports will keep them of abusing anyone in the future.In all of this the person I have compassion for is the original Mrs. Salahi.To be publicly defamed by these two with no voice must have been unbearable.Talk about Bulling! I can't think of a worse punishment in life than to be connected to Mecheale and Tareq for all my remaining days.

Since this will be hopefully be our last chat together, I want to thank Roxanne, Amy and the Washington Post for all their work on this story -- both the original expose and Amy's hilarious and uniquely informative recaps. I'm now a Reliable Source fan forever! (RSFF)

Ditto to the rest of you guys! Lawpool, above all, but everyone really.

You state "Closure". Well, I suppose you are correct in the respect that largely superfluous fluff chapter of surreal "reality" television trash thankfully is closed, but the final actual reality chapter has yet to be written.

More than a few pesky details remain, including:

1. The outcome of the Federal Grand Jury inquiry re their White House shenanigans.

2. The matter of the on-going investigation by the Commonwealth of Virginia into their highly suspect "charity".

3. With regard to #2, perhaps an IRS investigation into the "charity", their business enterprises, and personal finances as well.

4. The matter of the allegedly stolen wine from his parents' property.

5. The matter of Tareq & Michaele apparently seeming to give away assets of Oasis [wine, by the way] while it was in Chapter 7 Bankruptcy.

6. The matter of the Chapter 7 Bankruptcy of their "America's Polo Cup" and "Oasis Enterprises, Inc."

7. The matter of all their upaid creditors of their various business enterprises as well as creditors of them personally.

8. The matter of their bounced check to the Montgomery County Maryland government for booze, no less, for which they could potentially face a felony charge.

But they don’t seem to care,
Hey, they’re walking on air!
They just want to party and play!

And here’s a thought, friend,
Should not that party train end,
So long as their creditors remain unpaid?

It just seems to me,
Based upon this sad history,
Many questions remain to be answered.

I think they deserve the attention,
They’re so intent on gettin’,
Maybe just not in the manner they seek.

I am sure they will frown,
If indictments come down.
But what they have sown they also should reap.

They will get their attention,
When they are put in detention,
For taxes or fraud or grifting.

Also to dump into that mire,
One really must inquire,
Exactly to what does this couple aspire?

Is it fame & television they seek?
Fine, I’ll just wait for a peek,
Of their perp walks to prison with barbed wire.

And I’ll observe, don’t you know,
Regardless of any “show”,
These matters really are all quite serious.

And here’s another thought,
About the trouble they wrought,
In terms of their White House security breaches.

Considering in retrospect,
If their moral compasses are so unchecked,
Does it make the potential consequences of their antics more serious?

Another question is this:
Will their marital bliss,
Be preserved in two separate prisons?

Or as some might suspect,
Can they keep it in check,
Or will their desires surely be shiftin’?

And I finally must pose:
For Missy what clothes?
Is a sari approved prison fashion?

I'm not gonna go so far to say that Michele's MS condition is fake. Her appearance on the reunion shows revealed to me that she's not physically well. I can see the difference between how she appeared on the episodes and how she appeared on the reunion. However, I do believe they're using her MS for sympathy in a futile attempt to get people on their side. The one thing I've learned is that Tareq is the one who instigated everything and Michaele went along. Together, they are a pair of some rather despicable impostors.

It wasn't meant to be funny. All of those issues are absolutely dead-serious, although I suspect that couple still and will never understand the seriousness of their actions. After all, they are the self-described "IT" couple of DC, and she is the self-described "Party Barbie Girl".

I will strongly suggest here and now there is nothing funny at all about that couple.

There is solace in knowing that Michaele and Tareq Salahi have been exposed as fraudulent - beyond their ability to repair the damage, in spite of their denials, excuses and coverups. They may have notoriety, but they will never attain the respect and social position they craved so badly. Instead, they're the arrogant fools that ended up unintentionally entertaining us with their stunts and stupidity. (Jackass Meets the Real Housewives of DC?)

In recent years these two made their livelihood from their charity functions and connections. Their narcissism led them to the crucial error of allowing cameras into their lives. Inevitably their false lifestyle and shady shenanigans were exposed on film both directly and indirectly by eye witnesses. We all easily connected the dots and saw the pattern of deceit.

For me, there are two positives to this story. First, I will never give to any charity that is remotely associated with either of these two creeps. Second, although it was wrong of them to use MS (whether real or imagined in her case, I don't know) as a shield to deflect their dishonest behavior, it did raise awareness of the disease.

We haven't heard the last of them, for sure. Now that Tareq is flat broke and busted, perhaps Michaele will look for $$greener$$ pastures...whatever it is she'll make sure she gets in the news...

Poor Michaele. She is not the real evil one here. She is definitely quite comfortable lying, but I fear she is not... (ahem).. bright enough to do any real damage on her own.

But as a pair, these are not benign members of society. The White House crashing is actually far, far, down their list of crimes. In fact, by crashing the White House, they actually did society a great service by exposing their larger frauds.

I do think contracting for goods and services, from honest and trusting suppliers, for which you know you cannot pay, is a serious moral crime. It is not benign in any way. I also think conducting a smear campaign on your mother in order to access family assets is another sign of massive character defects which make the world a worse place.

But at the top of the list, no doubt, is setting up a fake charity to fund a pretend rich lifestyle. This is well beyond everything else they have done, and in fact I think is about the most evil of any non-violent crimes. It is definitely worse than what Bernie Madoff did (though Madoff was able to execute his on a much larger scale). Madoff's victims never thought they were saving lives by putting their money with him; they just wanted privileged access to good investments, and they got scammed. But Tareq Salahi indisputably funneled away money that should have gone toward trying to cure serious diseases, and which the donors thought were going to this purpose, and used the money to take limos around Washington to stay in hotel suites. And all of it was by design, and Michaele was a (perhaps unwitting) participant in the fraud. This makes the white house crashing seem like jaywalking. It is as close to a pure evil act that you can get.

Tareq, while being 100 times more evil and calculating than Michaele, in the end wasn't bright enough to enter the big league of scammers. He could have learned some lessons from Madoff: if you are going to conduct the Big Scam, don't conduct small scams at the same time. You need to appear fully honest in all your little dealings (paying your housekeepers, suppliers, etc) and otherwise giving the impression that your trustworthiness is beyond question. THAT will give you the breathing room to really conduct the Big Scam. In other words, don't mess up your billion dollar scam by stiffing a bunch of $400 dollar suppliers.

Tareq didn't learn this. He had a decent sized scam going; his "Americas Polo Cup" was taking in upwards of a half million bucks a year. If he had quietly continued that, he probably could have gone on for decades before he was found out, if ever. But no - he had to also run little small-time stuff, stiffing people on grass-cutting bills, overcharging peoples credit cards who booked wine tours, and (last but not least) sneaking into parties. These little things (each fairly benign in and of itself) eventually exposed the larger evil that Tareq was perpetrating.

By the way, thanks MeriJ, LAWPOOL, Roxanne and Amy, and all the regular posters here.

I have really enjoyed this. Why? Because it is hugely, hugely satisfying to see BS'ers get busted.

I feel like we all have mini versions of Tareq and Michaele in each of our lives, to some extent -- whether the overextended neighbors buying luxury cars, or the blabbermouth name-dropper at work, or whatever.

Usually they never get called out publicly. By watching the highly public humiliation of the Salahis, we all vicariously got the satisfaction of, finally, seeing some justice done. A real victory for all the honest folk living below their means, playing by the rules, and generally trying to live our lives with integrity.

My thoughts EXACTLY. Having lived in Northern Virginia for several years and seeing how Tareq & Michaele single-handedly bankrupted a once-thriving winery, I have thoroughly enjoyed seeing them be exposed on national television. For the record, Fauquier County Govt did not kill the winery - they did. Instead of reinvesting the profits back into the business, they spent it on a lavish, selfish lifestyle. Drive by. You'll see that the vines are pretty much dead.

As for the county, Tareq always pushed the envelope when it came to respecting the community ordinances - late night amplified music, fireworks, etc. The Fauquier Sheriff's office visited Oasis Winery several times over the years. His blatant disregard for the ordinances wasted alot of the Sheriff's resources & taxpayers' money.

For the record, WHAT CREDIBLE ORGANIZATION ever awarded Oasis Winery "Top 10 in the world?" (This has been a long-standing joke among the locals!)

I think the only thing missing from the Salahis tangled web is Ann Rule - one of the best true crime writers out there. Of course, Miss Rule's books always involve murder (daddy just died), greed, jealousy & usually revolve around family squabbles over money, kids, or another woman/man. The Salahi saga is right up her alley. I wish she'd write that book.

I can't leave without sharing a little bit from Tareq's written description of himself, supplied as "Attachment VIII, Tareq Salahi Chairman, America's Cup of Polo" to a $135K grant request to the Loudoun County [VA] government, which, by the way, was granted:

"Born with a philanthropist's heart and raised on polo ponies and wine, it's hard to imagine anyone better suited to serve as Chairman of the America's Cup of Polo . . . .

Yet, Salahi's passion, drive and talent go far beyond the boundaries of international polo fields. Under his stewardship, Oasis Winery . . .has morphed from what Salahi calls a 'hobby gone mad' into what Wine Enthusiast hails as on of the 'Top 10 Wineries in the World.' . . . .

Salahi is a fierce advocate of the Journey for the Cure Foundation, which is a public charity foundation that funds cures for Leukemia and Lymphoma Society and the MS Society. 'They fund matters that are dear to my heart . . ..' . . . .

Salahi's energies will merge with each of these causes, racing like a polo pony at breakneck speed with riveting excitement, at the America's Cup of Polo, which is designed to be a fund-raising conduit for the Journey for the Cure Foundation . .."

In the words of the poular humorist, Dave Berry, I am not making this up.

Yuck. What was the grant for? I assume the money was stolen outright by the Salahis once it was granted?

This was the Salahis huge miscalculation in crashing the white house - they thought it would help their profile by lending a bit of credibility to their scams.... but instead, it blew their cover in a spectacular fashion. There is no way they could secure a $135k grant now. They might be able to draw a few curious onlookers to a bowling alley opening, but not much more than that. They did the world a huge service with the white house crashing.

As Mr. Sidelines simply refuses to be in the same room with DC Housewives, I did not see the final installment of the Reunion Show until this weekend. My thoughts are the same with it as with the newspaper articles and all the court cases: These Salahis simply do not care what the rest of the world thinks of them. Their family motto is: There is a sucker born every minute and we are out to find them.
This is not the end of the Salamis (good work on whoever coined that name.) They will be back; either in another “reality” show, or in court, or in the newspapers, or God help the Virginia Wine Industry by weaseling their way into a winery operation. People like this cannot pass a mirror without admiring themselves. Such a shame they hurt so many – and growler55, YES Michaele is as bad as Tareq, perhaps worse. I have watched them very closely for years now.
So I will not say goodbye to Lawpool or MeriJ or growler55 or any of the rest of you. We will be meeting on another comments page in the future. Trust me on this.

Cracks me up that now its out there that the estate that the Salahi's claimed was their's in the audition tapes is in fact not their's and is the home of someone else. Man these two can't help themselves.

Unfortunately, instead of laying low, the Salahis hubris knows no bounds. Check out the Oasis Winery website. They're now accepting wedding reservations for 2011 and using Tareq's late father as collateral (or as they put it "Dirgham's wish").

I went to the Bowlmor event! We rocked it! My girlfriend and I arrived the same time as the Salahis – no limo, just a black SUV with a modest entourage. We stood behind them all the way into the club. I mean bowling alley.

We only stayed long enough to inhale a free drink, snarf some yummy reality chef Hors d'oeuvres, snap a trophy wall photo (Mic leaning on my shoulder) and then scram. Because that’s our understanding of how one does these things here in the nation’s capital. There are rules, you know.

Michaele was tall, as we knew, but Tareq was a little taller than we expected.

They bowled a full game for the professional photogs, Mic in her 4 inch heels for the most part. That’s got to be a first for that bowling alley!

They were actually good sports about the whole thing. The event was pretty silly and probably felt demeaning at times, but they did their best to have a good time or at least to appear to be having one.

It excuses nothing in their acts of fraud, obviously, but that was the feeling I came away with.

When Mic asked my name my sweetie blurted out "Thomas" -- which is technically my first name and the one we used to get in the door -- just as I said the name I actually go. It was right out of a movie (or maybe I flatter myself and it was right out of a daytime soap.)

I had hoped to say hello to Tareq as well, but it occurred to me that he might indeed recognize my name and that it would be a little rude to mar their evening that way -- a la you Reliable Source ladies earlier this year! -- so I passed on the opportunity.

Bowlmor seems like a great place to knock down a few pins, with a full bar and a brand spankin’ new celebrity chef menu. (That’s my payback for the good times last night. Thanks, April!)

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