Irritatingly unrealistic, yet common movie scenes part 1

Yeah, I know. It’s a movie, so therefore, nothing should bother me, right? But certain things are just flat out annoying when they are enacted on the silver screen. So I’ve tried to come up with a list of the most irritating things depicted in movies. Where possible, I’ve tried to include a video for demonstration purpose.

1. Showing a dial tone after someone hangs up on a cell phone. Now this, I actually WISH would happen in real life. But then again, I’m a T-Mobile customer, so I drop calls all the time. If I had a dial tone, instead of silence, I’d spend a lot less time talking to myself.

2. To quote Lonely Island, “Cool guys don’t look at explosions”. This just bugs the crap out of me. What man wouldn’t want to get the perfect view of his pyrotechnics? If I’m blowing up a car/helicopter/building, you can bet I’m not only watching it, I’m filming it. And I’m uploading that clip to youtube later. Proudly. But that’s because I’m a little kid at heart (as all guys are) and there is NO WAY I’m missing out on an awesome explosion.

Just watch the video.

3. The “infinite zoom” otherwise known as “Enhance that”. You’ve seen this on pretty much any movie involving a crime and surveillance footage. Through enhancing video footage, millions of crimes are solved on television through zooming in 1,000,000,000 X, and clarifying the graininess, and voila! You see the killer’s reflection in the glistening enamel of a man’s tooth.

Here’s a great montage, dedicated to the “enhance”

4. The computer that makes all kinds of whiring and beeping noises as it is transferring files, opening files, or in this video–being hacked. This one is contributed by Cory Anderson.

I found a great video that not only shows a noisy computer, but also has a ridiculous scene shows that two morons actually take over the same keyboard to try to type fast enough to prevent a hacker attack… ? But then again, it is NCIS, the cheesiest cop drama ever. In the existence of all of television.

5. Also technology related, the scenes where a hacker has to access a top-secret government computer. Well, darn, there is a large, blinking, dark red lettering, that says “ACCESS DENIED!!!” every time he enters a password. A couple of tries later, he gets it in green this time, “ACCESS GRANTED!” Then, he types in commands simple enough for us idiot audience members to understand–like “upload secret files”, or “Open President’s personal data”. Then, it’s open… and with a bunch of clicking and whirring, they have it downloaded. Not without a blatantly obvious progress bar, of course.