2011 MVP Race – LeBron James dat MVP?

Many people are claiming that this is LeBron’s MVP to lose especially the LeBron James Defense Force. Where do we start? I cannot think where to begin. I don’t even know where the middle lays. Where does it end? Is the based god real? Is this a slippery slope? Only time will tell. Why are we even arguing semantics? Whose side are you on? Many questions. Not many answers. LeBron James versus The World is shaping up to be better than Scott Pilgrim versus The World.

LeBron James is the back to back league MVP for anyone fapping to porn. However, he slipped this year according to the numbers. You do realize that this guy is capable of averaging 32 points, 9 rebounds, and 9 assists per game, right? He will never reach that. It’s frustrating to not witness this. Frankly, I am pissed. James only utilizes 75% of his skills. We will not see him reach 100%. It’s like saying “Oh damn. I am so gifted. I am too good. I don’t want to get better because I don’t need to. I want to tweet self motivational tweets over Twitter instead.” This is why, other than The Decision, LeBron is the most controversial MVP candidate. Let’s get that NBA League MVP Criteria over here. Stat.

A) The Numbers – 58 games played, 38.3 MPG, FG .488, 3PT .338, FT .758, STL 1.6, BLK 0.6, RPG 7.5, AST 7.2, PPG 26.2, PER 26.6
Most knew that his digits would drop once he teamed up with Wade and Bosh. It’s pathetic to see it actually happen. They’re MVP caliber numbers, but not super enough to shut down any arguments from other candidates. The stat whores are fapping to these regardless because LeBron is their God.

B) Team record – 43-17. 4th in NBA. 2nd in Eastern Conference.
Not bad. Not bad. Not great. Not great. It’s not great because they should be undefeated. Okay, I’ll get off that beaten horse. The Heat should be better than the San Antonio Spurs currently sitting at 49-11. Miami is also terrible against .500 teams. Bloody hell. I can hear LeBron fans saying, “But, but, but…here’s the thing…”

C) Impact – Oh bloody hell. Where do I start? The only thing I can say is that Miami is better than last year’s Miami, record wise. LeBron’s Cavs last season were better at this point. He did more with less last season. He’s doing less with more this season. Bloody hell. I hear “Fire Spo” chants ringing in the background. The best player in the NBA can’t even have a respectable record against .500 teams. This is as believable as Charlie Sheen becoming the ultimate unemployed winner. Come to think of it, Charlie Sheen is the winner.

SMFH. He is the anointed Best Player in the NBA by many. LeBron was probably right when he said last year that people were spoiled from his performances. Hipsters and stat fappers easily gave him the MVP award this season. Then I see someone screaming, “LeBron needs more help.” Seriously? That is why I liken him to David Fincher’s The Social Network. That film had a lot of backers and unwarranted hype. It’s a great film, but not good enough to beat The King’s Speech. LeBron also worries about Twitter and calling out former teammates a lot. He has a 9% shot at getting the MVP. He gets the award if the race ends today because the team record is good enough. Unfortunately the race does not end today. He’s not winning it at season’s end.