Oddly enough, I have a phobia of falling asleep in chairs. It’s the notion of falling backwards or sideways and waking up in a crumpled heap of bones and pain that unsettles me enough to prevent dozing off. Spain – in tonights game, and throughout the tournament – bore me to tears. Tonight I fell asleep in a chair watching them.

Mercifully, I’ve no broken bones or injuries to report. Yes, I am fully aware of their technical brilliance. Unquestionably, they have very gifted players. But they have become monstrously fucking dull now the novelty has worn off.

The World Cup final tipped me over the edge. The tippa-tappa football doesn’t provide anything exhilarating. Watching Xavi and Iniesta pass back an forth to each other repeatedly is something I’d liken to being forced to watch Spiderman 3 over and over – it’s all very flashy, but nothing really happens. At least with Barcelona you have Messi to liven things up.

I think my brewing disdain stems from the abhorrent characters they have in their team. People rightfully critiqued the Dutch’s tactics in that final, but I couldn’t help but wish Mark van Bommel would lose his sanity completely and drop kick Sergio Busquets. Even Cesc, a player I once worshipped, has exhibited the odd bout of petulance you’d expect to see from Xavi.

The French paid the price for doing what so many do – they worried more about Spain than they did trying to impose their own game. It’s a given the Spanish will enjoy the majority of the possession, but if you’re not going to at least try to attack them, you’re just waiting until you concede.

Of course, as an Arsenal fan I paid most of my (conscious) attention to Laurent Koscielny. I do love him. He’s gone from a few first season wobbles to become a accomplished defender, and he held his own comfortably. The two could-be-Gooners, M’Vila and Giroud, were fairly disappointing – especially M’Vila who appeared a little off the pace and spent the occasional moment drooling with admiration at Xabi Alonso. I also heard someone refer to Giroud as ‘the French Andy Carroll’ which has alarmed me no end.

Lastly, as this is a quick update before I head to bed – I’m bloody shattered, Nicklas Bendtner looks like he might be headed to mega-rich Malaga. Given they’ve got wads of cash dripping from their earholes, I think we could get a tidy little sum for the greatest striker in the known universe. They might even be able to pay his wages and keep him in ridiculous hats….

That’s all for now. Tomorrow is the big England game. I shall be addressing that in the morning’s post. Until then, drop me a comment, and thanks for reading, you beautiful bastards.

i completely diagree with you over spain….i think you are actually bored with france who can’t match the technical brilliance exhibited by the spaniards and i don’t think any other team in the world can..don’t get me wrong, they are not unbeatable, but they are currently the best..up spain for euros.get bored with other teams who can’t provide such magnificent display n stop substituting your disgust for other teams for spain’s brilliance

Total rubbish!! Jelous English that can’t stand the just so gifted and technical spanish. Can you compare the spanish ball control to your one way out of date English Rugby style. Pls apprishiate good football when you see one

I have to agree with watching Spain….its as dull as hell. I much prefer to watch Germany, the passing is fast paced and insisive with the odd slick trick, but Spain it is pass pass pass…..pass…..pass back….pass…pass forward……pass to winger…..pass back……pass and then once every 10 mins or so they might actually make 1 incisive pass because everyone is moved outta position or were bored to death chasing shadows and have switched off. Even the commentators have said that Spain ‘lull’ their opponents with their insessant passing until someone loses concentration. IE they pass the other team off the park until they give away fould out of frustration or are bored out of their skulls so when the stinging pass comes the opposition doesn’t really compute as to what they are doing and they get their chance. I much the prefer the slick fast passing game. It even annoys me with Arsenal when they do this…the fast slick passing games they display when they are full of confidence is amazing but we have some stinkers of games that we pass pass pass and get to the 18 yard box then pass back, then pass to the wing, then pass back all the while the oppositions defense get behind the ball and we lose it and then the whole process begins again………..you feel like screaming at the TV something to the effect of “SHOOT THE ****ING BALL”

yes i understand about the novelty but you are still wrong, spain are amazing and play untouchable football with skill, speed, vision and the best passing you will ever see. and also about france, yes! koscielny was top notch, and he owned torres for every minute he was on the pitch and for m’vila…… well how can you be dissapointed! he was frances best player, high work rate, regularly breaking it down, always helping at the back and the boy has quite a majestic pass.

I agree spain are dull this days but as it works for them cus the same way we get dull watching them so do they pass their opponents into the dull mode with the ball and its pretty frustrating I am sure if not for proffessionalism one of the opposing players wouldn’t mind breaking their boring legs in 2 halves out of frustration for lack of the ball possesion.

The France selection was questionable. Reviellere at right back and Debuchy at right wing? That looked very defensive to me. Blanc tried to play way too much containment which stifled their attack and France continually kept their shape which made them predictable. I think starting with Giroud would have been a much better option as Spain had trouble dealing with the few balls into the box but Ribery and company were trying to outpass them which didn’t work. I hardly think it’s fair to judge Giroud on sub cameos because neither Benemza nor Ribery have been that good during this tournament either and they’ve had more game time. Can we judge them the same way now too?

Truth is that France as whole are a young team who are rebuilding so it’s poor to make a call on every player individually as they’re basically a perpetual experimental squad right now.

My favourite team in this Euro is Germany. The way they play excite me a lot. I like their passing and running with the ball on the ground. I agreed with you Spain style of play is too dull, after all their tip-tap they can’t even score more than two goals. And in your rating over M’villa, you don’t a player with Spain match, they are too good in passing the ball around them self ok, at list i saw him doing some long passes combine with the through pass he gave to the attackers. Then in Olivier Giroud, situation he is not a Carol type. He is a team player and gat what the Epl require am talking of the physicallity the EPL needs. The two dudes are good. I hope and believe this week they Gunner be a Gunner. Arsenal will i be till infinity.