The Tale of Never Fail Pie Crust. Part One.

Where to begin? It’s been nearly a year since I ransacked Mother Lovett’s recipes. I wish I could call it a recipe box, but her recipes are really just thrown together in a bag, completely unorganized. Much like my life.

Oh wait. Those aren’t really her recipes. Her real recipes are only stored inside her head. Which we hope and pray is in Heaven. Well, that’s great and all, but it doesn’t do me any good down here.

I deemed last Wednesday to be the day. The day that I would master her crust. Or at least the crust recipe that came along with her recipes.

Or just any crust. I just wanted to make a darn pie crust.

I think the reason I have not attempted said crust before is because I just don’t love pie. I enjoy pies such as coconut cream, peanut butter, chocolate silk and the like, probably because they make your teeth hurt from their divine sweetness. But an apple pie? A peach pie? A cherry pie? There is a time and a place for those pies; they must be warm and topped with 3 perfect scoops of vanilla bean ice cream that melts slowly into the apple crevices and creates a creamy deliciousness.

Come on. You know exactly what I’m talking about.

So I got to work with no specific pie in mind. I sifted my flour.

MY OTHER RECIPES

Mother Lovett didn’t even use a cup measure. She used a spoon. She just added enough until it “looked right.” Not fair. Not fair at all, my friends.

Also completely unlike Mother Lovett, I used shortening. I know she is rolling over in her grave at this one. The lard gods are crying.

I didn’t even know where to look for lard. And frankly, it scared me a bit to purchase lard. I’m not sure why. It’s not like you’re going to find me elbow deep in a can of lard at 3 in the morning. Chocolate yes, lard no. Don’t worry, I’ve now learned my lard lesson.

But the thing is, this recipe called for shortening. That was my first clue that it wasn’t really her recipe. But since it was in her recipes, and it was the only pie crust recipe in her recipes, I forged ahead.

I got dirty. I covered myself in flour. I covered my kitchen floor in flour. The day after I scrubbed it.

However, this is where I feel most at home. In my kitchen, baking and cooking, with a tiny framed picture of my stubborn Swede of a grandmother looking down upon me. I have no formal training but I adore trying new things and teaching myself.

Evidently, I also enjoy failing. It’s all part of the fun.

I was pretty sure I did everything right. I followed the instructions to a T, which is difficult for me. I rolled the dough into a ball, even thought it didn’t really look right.

And I chilled it in the fridge.

Then I did many productive things, like watch Dear John for the third time in two days and eat half of our pre-bought Halloween candy. It’s tough work waiting for pie crust to chill. It’s serious business.

At this time, Mother Lovett probably washed her walls, did her laundry (only on Monday), dusted the furniture (only on Thursday), and picked lint out of her neutral colored carpet that only her legally blind eye could see.

Once the dough was chilled, I brought it out and instantly lost my patience. Let’s just say there were about 60 straight minutes of this:

And this:

When I got married I become a much more patient person, and that is not saying much. I had to. Mr. How Sweet is a handful himself – having two of us around just wasn’t going to fly. This pie crust tested my patience more than Mr. How Sweet does each evening when he holds the remote control.

The crust just never fit. I wanted it to be perfect and well… it wasn’t.

But I smashed it in there anyway.

And then I cut the crust this way because I think I saw Ina Garten do it and I want to be her. I want to have her elegance and simplicity and class. Sadly, I think my lack of lard and the use of dirty paper scissors disqualifies me.

So where does that leave me?

Here is what I got. And this is what is still sitting in my fridge. Yes, I realize it is probably no longer useable.

But that’s okay. I will make another. I was too scared to bake it. And I had no plan. No fruit, no chocolate, no coconut. I was a poorly planned out pastry maker.

I do not have the pie crust gene. What does it take? I’m not really sure but I am going to implant myself with the gene and make a stinkin’ pie.

This is where you come in.

1. What kind of pie should I make? Perhaps I should have a plan first.

2. Do you have a fabulously (easy) pie crust recipe? One that never fails you?

At first, I was hellbent on perfecting this recipe for the sentimental value it held. I will still be doing that, but now… I want your recipe. The best you have. I’m going to tackle it head on!

120 comments

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Oh, my gosh. She sounds like my mom when it comes to pie crust – my mom makes an excellent chicken pie (I should really interview her and do a post on that one of these days…) and as for the pie crust? She puts some flour in a bowl. Cuts in some butter. Adds water until it sticks together. Chills it.

Oh yeah and this recipes freezes really well. I will make a few batches and just store them in the freezer. I use this for all pie recipes too. It is fantastic for chicken pot pie.

This one is so easy, try it. I’ve used this one before.

I LOVE this one :) I usually use 2 Tbsp of sugar though! So easy to make and it comes out perfect, flaky, delicious! I’ve done apple, blueberry, cherry, and I can’t wait to do pumpkin this year. I usually half the recipe for my apple and use a crumb topping.

Oh SWEETIE! I feel SO bad for all of the hard work you put into a crust that coud have been a complete JOY in the making for you! Put down your pastry cutter and back away slowly…. Goooooood :-) Now go get out your food processor (TRUST ME, PLEASE… I’m a second year culinary student who just got an “A” in Convenience Bakery class!) and make THIS crust

Place flours, salt, and sugar into the food processor. Pulse 2 times to incorporate the dry ingredients.

Add butter and pulse 4 times.

Add shortening and pulse 3 times.

Add cider vinegar and start to pulse as you slowly pour in the water. Continue pulsing until ingredients are just incorporated. DO NOT OVER MIX!

Turn the ingredients out onto a hard surface that has been lightly dusted with flour. Flatten gently with the palm of your hand and shape into a circle. Using a knife, cut dough into 2 pieces, making one slightly larger than the other.

ENJOY YOUR PIE MAKING EXPERIENCE!

I love using cake flour – definitely going to try this recipe!

Now, I have no idea how to do pie crust, but I do know to get a flakey crust using butter, you have to cut it in. I would try mixing the shortening in with your fingers instead of the utensil. Being gentle is key for pastries!

Pie crusts are the worst for me! One that always seems to come out great is the on Simply Recipes. Ina makes a great on too :)

What a sweet post! Sadly, I don’t make pies…I like to make crumbles and crisps. They are so easy, and no pie crust to fool with! That said, if I were going to make a pie, I would make a caramel apple pie or a pumpkin pie with streusal topping! ;-)

This is hilarious to me mainly because your Mom’s pie crust is my Mom’s Sugar Cookies. The woman lies and I know it and continue to try to prove it. She makes THE BEST sugar cookies, fluffy and cakey and delicious. I use “the same recipe” and nothing, nadda, not my Mom’s cookies. She’s messing with me and I know it, they are her pride and joy — she’s never going to give up the real recipe or real secret to success with those fluffy ,sugary, treats!!

I have given in to simply pre-ordering a batch of them when I visit. Good Luck in your future pie endeavors and know that you are not alone in Mom recipe frustration!

P.S. I think the pie crust looks fine, “rustic” is what I would refer to it as if it were mine. Put random fruit in it, sprinkle it with cinnamon and sugar and bake it at ehh 350? til it smells vaguely burnt…also pop Dear John back in for the 4th time!

Way to give it a go…You can’t learn anything unless you try!
Maple pecan pie is one of my favs…
But one can never go wrong with an apple spice pie (of course with Vanilla ice cream on the side :)

I have never loved pie, unless we are talking about a graham cracker crust. However you can never go wrong with apple pie this time of year. Oh and Walmart sells lard, but I am a food snob when it comes to fats and refuse to buy it. You can even get it in buckets there.

I feel your pain! Every year I try and master the pie crust that is on the back of the Crisco package, but it never turns out quite right. Pie crusts are incredibly tempermental. Part of it just might be your inexperience with pie crust! I love how you just made a pie crust with no pie in mind. So cute!

Use all butter!!! I struggled with pie crust until I tried all butter crust! I like the recipe I used here http://www.990square.com/2010/06/strawberry-rhubarb-pie/. Also, don’t let the crust sit in the fridge as long as most recipes recommend–it gets to be like a rock and then it’s impossible to work with! Roll your crust into a ball, put it in the fridge and only let it stay there as long as it takes to make your filling.

And as for fillings, why not apples? It’s fall after all!

You could also put it between two peices of wax or parchment paper when you are done mixing, roll it out and then toss it in the fridge. I think cooling helps with the mechanics of the crust layer formation…

It looks great in that final picture!!! I say you make a bourbon pecan pie…and take a few hits of the bourbon yourself for all of your pie troubles! :-)

Firstly, there’s nothing wrong with eating Halloween candy before Halloween – you need to make sure it tastes good enough to give to the kiddies, right?
And second, I agree that lard is not something you’d ever find me knee-deep in either. Just the name itself sounds gross.

Finally, I think you should do some sort of twist on a pumpkin pie.. I’m not sure what kind – maybe with some walnuts. Or maybe you could find some sort of way to make a bacon pie?? ;)

My husband told me I was not allowed to buy Halloween candy until the morning of Halloween because he would eat it all. When it comes to candy that man has zero self control! :)

This time of year all I can think about is sweet potato pie… Mmmmm… Of course, I usually use a graham cracker crust for that, but I’m pretty sure regular crust would still be pretty flipping amazing. And I’ve used that same Martha recipe that other people have mentioned above with some pretty great results!

I believe with all my heart that pie is the best dessert ever created! I like ALL fruit pies (sorry) but my all time favorite is definitely pecan pie. Probably the most fattening but also probably the BEST!!! Apple runs a very close second…very close.

This recipe looks great! It’s awesome to have a go-to recipe when you need it.

I don’t have the pastry gene either! and I totally feel you, maybe is because I only like fruit with tons of ice cream and caramel sauce. Maybe people who like fruit pies know how to make crust better ;) I’ll read the suggestions to see if I ever make it. We’re in this together ;)

-Amalia

ah i could totally see that happening to me! also, i completely agree about pie! when it comes to fruit pie, it must be warm and there must be ice cream and to be honest, i could do with or without the crust!

I do have an amazing pie recipe that my friend Suzanne shared with me. I think the trick is ice cold water.

p.s. Make an apple pie.

Pie crusts aren’t my thing either. With the purchase of my food processor I have vowed to try again, but have so far just bought crust from the store (I know, terrible). But my go to pie recipe is a french silk pie, because it is made with chocolate chips and other things I always have lying around.

Good luck on try number two!

I, too, was always intimidated by pie crust. My mother-in-law makes incredible pie crust, and I never thought I could live up to “the legend.” I found the perfect recipe (and tricks!) though on NPR’s “The Splended Table.” The host, Lynne Rosetto Kasper, gives her secrets for the best pie crust, as well as a simple, delicious no-fail recipe. I made a blueberry pie the first time I tried it, and it turned out perfectly! Here’s the link to show’s transcript and her recipe: http://splendidtable.publicradio.org/recipes/pie-crust-improv-guide.shtml

And I agree – those pies are a sin. Delish.

I’ve made pie crust using several I’ve found on the Williams-Sonoma website, and they’ve all turned out well. My mom always makes quiche when she ruins a pie crust though- those don’t need to be pretty!!

I have never made a pie crust, nor do I plan on it. Buying the ones at WF are so much easier ;)

I have never attempted a classic pie crust. My mom gave up making them decades ago. Store bought works for me! I love pecan pie this time of year. It’s so good. My all-time favorite pie is key lime. I make the graham cracker crust from scratch. The key is to have a thick crust. Also, the filling cannot be baked. I use my grandmother’s recipe and make it every year for my dad’s birthday or father’s day.

This sounds really similar to a story of mine. I’ve always been intimidated by pie crust, I can make cookies, brownies, cakes and cook things from scratch galore. But pie crust, it scared me! About a month or two ago I decided it was time I got over my fear, my husband’s grandmother had given me her pie crust recipe months earlier and I decided to dig out. Long story short 3 hours later I was covered in flour and there were (quite literally) tears involved when I could not for the life of me figure out how to get the darn thing rolled out and in my pie pan. I’ve made two since then and each is getting a bit better (and at least now I’m not crying over it).

don’t worry if it’s not perfect – it adds character :)

We use a cream cheese pie crust for a lot of pies and it’s pretty easy…well, if we can do it you certainly can! It’s pretty much cream cheese, flour and butter…yup. And it tastes fabulous with gigantic scoops of ice cream of course…

I have never made pie crust, but I imagine it would be quite difficult. I think it is one of those recipes that requires both culinary talent and artistic talent. << I don't have the second one.

i use betty crocker’s
she’s only failed me once in my life (it was key lime pie that she told me to bake way too long). i trust betty.
and that crust looks like it needed a little more water than you used…. that might be the trouble

I just made my first pie crust on Sunday. I agree about the rolling, I had to call in my boyfriend to do it for me before I threw the pastry across the kitchen! I guess you can say I went for a more “rustic” look.

several people above hit the highlights, and gesine doesn’t stress the cold because she’s in her professional kitchen, but just know to watch your butter and be ready to pop it in the fridge for a couple of minutes if it’s threatening to soften. i don’t know if it’s ever really necessary, but if it’s not winter, i usually get timid after turn two and let it firm up a bit before proceeding. safer rather than sorry, and all.

and it really is a fabulous crust. people look at me differently after i’ve fed them pie using this crust. i love how thick she makes it. everyone i’ve ever given this to does, too. i think people don’t realize what a thick-ass crust can provide, with fruit pies, anyway. (alton’s blueberry lime is my template for fruit pies. not too sweet, wonderful filling consistency–it was the first pie i ever baked, and i’m not tempted to try anything else. as a template, i mean. one’s boyfriend can’t live on blueberry lime alone. strawbarb, he could manage.)

and finally, i want to stress this, and it may not matter a lick to you, but between the time i’ve finished cutting the butter into pieces with a knife until the time comes to use the rolling pin, no tools. none. hands. all hands. i run them under coldcoldcold water before i begin and maybe even a couple times during, but it’s worth it. you have, by god, made this crust from effing scratch. and during, it makes me feel like a filthy brute, and i love it. (especially with this recipe, which is actually supposed to look like a complete failure until the very end. and it works! so freeing.) food processor methods are totally fine, but hands really are better.

there. i’ve gotten a lifetime’s worth of commenting done all in one place. yr welcome.

I stick with raw pies, because you don’t have to bake them and just get to eat a ton of nuts. Yum.
I think you should make a pecan chocolate torte! There’s a recipe in the new Food network Mag

I am with you on pie, which I think is why my favourite is undoubtedly pecan. It barely counts as pie. I’ve been on the lookout for pie crusts that contain butter instead of crisco, but apparently those just don’t work. If you reach success with a butter-based crust though, I would love to read about it!

ok…you may not have the pie gene but I dont have ANY BAKING GENE!!! haha at least you are good at 99% of all other baking that takes place!!!

I think you should make a cherry pie–just because I have never had one and I hear they are quite delicious!! I also love a classic apple pie!

I used to be the same way – I used the recipe from my Betty Crocker cookbook, and for some reason it was never that great. Hubby liked store-bought better, so for a while I bought pie crust rather than making it. That is, until I made the Pioneer Woman’s perfect pie crust recipe, which is now my go-to recipe. Seriously…it’s good stuff!! http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2007/12/p-p-p-pie_crust_and_its_p-p-p-perfect/

I was always intimidated by homemade pie crusts, that was until I read Jenna’s post on Eat, Live, Run! I followed and step-by-step method exactly and the crust was beautiful, flaky and buttery. I made an apple streusel pie topped with homemade caramel and added scoops of icecream, to get in my daily calcium of course :)

Ok, I didn’t bother to read all the comments above, so it’s entirely likely that I’m a repeat here. However, pie crust is one of the few things I feel I have worked out the kinks on over the years and can do pretty consistently. But let me tell you–its’ never easy! First of all, I’ve done it with lard, and I don’t think it’s worth it. It’s harder to work with and doesn’t actually taste as good as when you make it with real, unsalted butter (even though my grandma always used lard and I felt a little guilty changing things up!). I can send you the recipe if you want it (I’m at work right now and don’t have it with me, but if you email me a reminder I’ll send it when I get home!).
Also–when you are rolling it out, you do have to exercise extreme patience, but it’s helpful to have a little bowl of room temperature water nearby to glue the crust back together when it cracks apart. Just put a little on your fingers and rub it into the crust.
As for what kind of pie to make–at this time of year I think it needs to be pumpkin!

After trying recipe after recipe I found the best crust. This is how I do it:
1: Drive to Jewel
2: Head straight to pie crust section
3: Pick up long thin red box that starts with a “P”
4: Pay for long thin red box that starts with a “P”
5: Drive home and make favorite recipe with the pie crust from the long thin red box that starts with a “P”

I have failed countless times on my own and have finally found the crust that has never failed me. I know…

LOL I totally agree! That’s the way I make sure mine is fail-proof also! (c: I always make cherry pies, because it’s the hubby’s favorite. When it’s almost done I rub butter on top and sprinkle with sugar. Makes it even more yummy!

ahh thank you for this – I always buy the pre-made crusts and then feel guilty saying the pie is homemade! I think you should make cranberry apple pie – YUM :)

You are going to have so many recipes you won’t know what to do with them!0
I always use this one (http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Ruths-Grandmas-Pie-Crust/Detail.aspx). It makes enough extra that you don’t have to be accurate when rolling it out… it always fits. I also use a silpat liner to roll my dough. It is easier to put it into the pie dish. Its okay to take the excess you cut off your dough & piece it into the holes on the side of the pie dish. This really is the best pie dough recipe I’ve ever used – and I’ve tried a lot of them! Happy hunting.

Okay…I made Jenna’s pie crust recently for my peach pie..and one of the steps was putting all ingredients in the freezer before mixing them together…for like 30min I think. The water you pour in was supposed to be so cold there were small ice crystals. It was hard to work with, but I’ve heard that process a lot and think it’s key! :) I even stuck the flour in the freezer! Goooood luck! Um, my vote is pumpkin pie…obviously!