Posts Tagged ‘marriage’

My relationships over the years have been a mix. Some were good, some were bad and others were horrific.

A few years ago I met Orgle. I quickly realized this was more than good, this was something special. We moved in together just a few months after starting to date. We have since moved across the country and are planning our wedding for next year.

I’m not a huge fan of weddings. Not even my own. The frustration is mounting.

It’s not the idea of being with Orgle for the rest of my life that is bothersome. That’s no biggie. I wanna lock that kid down now. He’s one of those baby-faced men who won’t be participating in Movember because he… can’t. But he is owning his look now. He’s better looking today with his patch of white hair than he was when we met.

I know that it will all come together in its own cheaply beautiful way, I in my green dress, Orgle dressed as a visiting professor. Surrounded by a handful of close friends, but no bridal party, we will have what we think of as a wedding, even if it’s only adjacent to the traditions people expect (and the weather Australians are hopeful for).

The core is there. The payoff will come. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Other than relationships built by family ties, my longest relationship has been one with the Oilers. My vintage of Oiler fandom is one that doesn’t really remember the cups. I was alive, but learning the fundamentals from talking to riding a bike were more important at the time.

My first Oilers game was in the 1991-92 season against the San Jose Sharks. I was 10. Looking back, maybe I picked the wrong team.

Anyways, the glory days of boys on the bus has never really resonated with me. I had the strife of almost losing the team, the terrible stretch in the early 90s and then now. Before the game on Saturday, I made the unfortunate comment that between team moves and injuries, the team could not get any worse. It took just 8 hours for that to happen. This is the low point of not just my fandom, but the Oilers organization.

Orgle joined me on the Oilers fan bus. When I met him, he was a Canucks fan. It’s the only Canadian city he had lived in, so I can’t really blame him. But a few weeks with me and his RSS was subscribed to Lowetide and Blackdogpat. We bought Gamecentre so that we could watch more games. The conversion was a pretty easy one. But think about the three years of teams he has put up with. Talent abounds but results don’t. He must really love me.

So, Orgle has never seen an ounce of success, I’ve never been a fan for a cup win, and this organization can’t get much worse.

A positive person would say there’s no where to go but up. A negative person would quit, cold turkey.

I’m a realistic person.

I’ve dedicated over 2 decades to this team and for half of it, they haven’t even competed. ’96 to ’06, those were my glory years. Just being in it is what matters to me.

A friend wrote on Facebook about the Oilers: “my loyalty remains unwavering, my dedication is what’s fragile.”

I can’t agree more. So while I don’t think I can break up with the Oilers, what we have is an unhealthy relationship. I give everything I’ve got and in return, I get depressed and Luke Gazdic.

Oilers, this isn’t “Good Bye”, it’s see you around. For now I need to step back. I need you to think about what you’ve done. I realize that you have been down on your luck this season, but you’re pulling me down with you (and I am already in a wedding planning funk). I’ll be back, whether I like it or not. I’ll miss your musk.

But for now, take care of yourself, get healthy, and I’ll see you on the other side of .500.

I used to have a “30 things to do before I’m 30” list. While I didn’t accomplish everything on it, I gave it a try (25/30). I figure I got the big things done: Before 30 I managed to save up some money (which is allowing me to have an extended unemployment as I find something I really want to do, rather than just jumping back into an unfulfilling role), I established a career, I traveled a lot (celebrating the big 3-0 solo in Japan last year), I fell in love with a man with whom I’d like to explore the rest of my life, and I think I have a better grasp on who I am then I ever did in my 20s.