During my trip to Tokyo last weekend Kei made sure to
fill me up with all sorts of pop. I’m planning on following up on
my last article in a future update but in the meantime ponder this:

Despite the obviously topical relevance and poor photoshopping
I am actually not responsible for this image. You can see it in it’s
native home here
at Something
Awful. Seeing this image, I felt vindicated that I am not the only
person comparing modern pop to the synth-pop wave of the early 1980’s.

But, like I said, that is for another update. Last weekend
I went to Tokyo and I hung out with my friends, visited various arts food
establishments, and met Cornelius (CORNELIUS!!!). That’s all fine
and good, but what I’d like to talk to you about is this Merzbow/Lightning
Bolt concert we all attended.

The opener was a band by the name of Y2K Problem. If
there were a dialog to describe the emotions I felt while watching this
band it would go something like this:

Easily Persuaded Dan: “Hey, this band’s
kinda cool. They sound like Buffalo Daughter only without all the electronics.

Then came a DJ on three turntables with a set that lasted
too long. His work combining pop tracks and beat-less songs into a strange
hodge-podge of noise was intriguing though not quite attractive. The set
was unbearably long; I think an hour and a half.

Around this time a group of tall hipster American kids
pushed their way in front of us, taking no notice of the people they were
dislocating until I was pointing at one of their large backpacks, now
jammed up against the front of me, and making funny faces at my friend.
The guy turned around and said, “hey, sorry about that…no
hurt feelings, right?” and asked me whom I was there to see. Resisting
the urge to punch him I said, “meh, Lightning Bolt, I guess”
and he replied that he was there to see Merzbow, “the most extreme
music ever!” I listen to music because it’s extreme no more
than I eat Doritos because of their extreme nacho cheese flavor, and seeing
Merzbow play afterward only served to confirm my suspicions that American
indie-kids have no idea to what they are listening.

The soundbite from my friend June
is, “Merzbow is extreme all right. Extremely painful”. I can
agree with that but I’d like to extrapolate on how incredibly un-interesting
Merzbow is. I imagine there are probably two arguments for why people
would listen to him: 1) his music is good or 2) you have to understand
experimental music to like Merzbow. The first argument seems pretty easy
to refute, Merzbow is straight-up white noise filtered slowly over long
periods of time in a painful and non-complementary to the human ear way.
He essentially defies thousands of years of human musical history to create
a sound very unlike anything remotely related to classical music theory.

You can state it like that and make it sound like he’s
breaking through barriers and developing something wholly original, which
is the crux of argument number 2. Merzbow also fails in this regard, however.
When people like Karlheinz
Stockhausen manipulated noise sources with filters to produce scripted
musical scores in the late 1950’s they were doing something no one
had attempted before. It was, in short, an experiment; one that would
pave the way for the development of subtractive synthesis that would eventually
lead to modern electronic music. Since then, however, the same process
was shown by artists like Kraftwerk or Tangerine Dream to be malleable:
electronic instruments are analogous to traditional instruments. To claim
that Merzbow is interesting or experimental (or extreme!) to filter white
noise is to deny nearly half a century of progressively improving electronic
music. For Merzbow to play such music in front of an audience that grew
up on synth-pop is about as experimental as doing Newton’s apple-dropping
gravity experiment in front of a room full of physicists.

After Merzbow came DMBQ, as far as I could tell a Black
Sabbath knock off band. They weren’t too bad but at that moment
I would have liked to have heard something a little more relaxing.

Finally came Lightning Bolt, who are a conceptual band
of former art students from the US. When I heard they wore costumes I
wanted to believe they were like Gwar,
but that was a mistake. They were mediocre. I have developed a standard
for judging art based on “concepts”. If I can grasp your concept,
and if when I imagine your concept I imagine a significantly better execution
of your concept then you have expressed through your art then you have
failed as a conceptual artist. With Lightning Bolt it seemed like they
wanted to go for a simple, droning, monotonous music, which is fine by
me. However, they’re drummer was far too skilled for that type of
music and would frequently change to a more drum and bass style pattern.
The effect was of a genius drummer practicing over an incompetent and
monotonous bass player.

Throughout the whole thing Cornelius talked with his
friend from Violent Onsen
Geisha (who shouted “apologize!” from the rafters at Lightning
Bolt during their opening bout of technical difficulties) and conducted
business arrangements; watching him during the concert was like watching
the wedding scene during the Godfather. If only I could have asked Cornelius
what he thought of Merzbow.

I sat aghast. On the television screen was the video
for Nsync’s single “Pop” and sitting next to me was
my then 14 year old sister, beaming smiles. Up until this point I had
comfortably mocked Nsync, at times singing their songs and awkwardly dancing
for humor. But “Pop” was different, there was this weird glitch-pop
beat-box thing at the end and this was in 2001 before it was cliché
to be creative with electronics in pop music (I later found that the single
was produced by BT, producer of the best breakbeat single ever, 1997’s“Orbitus
Teranium”). I told my sister that I was concerned, if Nsync continued
to push creative boundaries I would have to take them seriously. I mumbled
that there was the possibility they could go the way of another massively
famous pop band, the Beatles. And mind you this wasn’t praise, this
was spoken out of complete and utter fear.

It’s been a while since then but that fear still
persists. This week Nsync’s JC released his first solo album, “Schizophrenic”
in Japan. Are JC Chasez and Justin Timberlake the new John and Paul…I
don’t know, but it makes an interesting match up.

I haven’t had time to faithfully analyze either
album but it strikes me that JC seems more willing to step away from genre.
“Justified” is pretty straight pop-RnB, defined by a fidelity
to Michael Jackson guided by the hands of today’s hot RnB producers.
I’m still not sure if I like pop-RnB, but I find that if I were
to like RnB this would be a really good album. The album, aside from its
title (I like my music like I like my text: “Justified”),
is at least credibly cool.

JC, on the other hand, maintains similar influences
to pop from the past (both JC and Justin were members of Nsync and the
Mickey Mouse club) but adds a lot more diversity into his tracks. Back
when my sister forced me to watch Nsync on TV, I liked him the most because
he (at least claimed he) was the guy responsible for their music, which
made him the “music” guy as opposed to the “heartthrob”
guy Justin (or the “edgy” guy Chris and “why won’t
that guy go away” guy Lance). Maybe then, he brings his own musical
interests to the table (he purportedly loves electronica which is how
he became friends with BT in the first place), which explains the diversity
in his music.

JC is also somewhat less cool than Justin Timberlake.
In his days in Nsync he always seemed like the laid back respectable guy
in the band. However now he’s releasing songs about lesbians and
aliens. I don’t know, he sounds like the guy who everyone thought
was cool and then he “tries to be himself” and ends up acting
like a dork trying to show that he’s not acting cool. But then you
get quotes like this too, “Nobody takes a rock and roll attitude
to pop music anymore. Nobody talks about love in an elevator anymore.
Everybody is too busy being cool. I didn't worry about being cool on this
album.” He’s sort of intriguing in his willing to combine
things and charming in his naivety.

So, what you get is not so much a John or a Paul from
JC as you get a Ringo. And even then the connection is tenuous. What you
have is Justin as this trend setter pop icon who isn’t really doing
that much new but is terribly cool, and JC as this guy who sort of idolizes
him but is kind of doing his own thing but is also almost hopelessly uncool.
And it strikes me that as time progresses we’ll see these two stars
differentiate themselves, Justin towards a more refined, edgy and adult
pop-RnB and JC towards a unique, semi-obscure pop point. I don’t
know, maybe Gary Numan and David Bowie are better pop reference points.
By the late 1970’s David Bowie was making straight pop laced with
disco while Gary Numan was singing songs about aliens, masturbation and
schizophrenia. However you do look at it, modern pop music needs refinement
and it looks like these two are our the most likely candidates for the
job.

Speaking of uncool, in researching this article I found
some pretty cool pics (Left picture is Justin Timberlake, right picture
left person is JC Chasez)!

Jordan Ceccarelli

And speaking of music that should suck but doesn’t,
I checked Dragon Ash’s album “Harvest” out from Tsutaya
and it is surprisingly not bad. I mean, it’s not excellent by any
sense of the word but if you accept, as American college radio recently
has, that Mad Capsule Markets is good, Dragon Ash is about 3000 times
better. If none of those bands sound familiar, than imagine 311 with electronics
and not nearly as bad.

I have a favorite Japanese phrase, “eto desu ne”.
It means absolutely nothing and is awesome (“um it’s yeah”).
You use it to start a sentence when you don't know what you are talking
about. I’ve also found a new most hated Japanese phrase, “sore
wa are desu yo)”. It also means nothing and you use it to answer
a question when you don't’know what you are talking about.

Howard Dean has withdrawn from the Democratic presidential
primary; Dean’s message will be absorbed into every other Democratic
candidate’s platform though what we see is a victory for neo-conservativism.
I made this image, and then made up that last part.

I’m not entirely lying though. It strikes me that
a win for Kerry is a win for Bush. You know, Bush:

It’s like a metaphor for his term in office: a
frame for each year. Jeez, this is going nowhere.

Change of subject: This weekend was the 55th annual
Tokamachi Snow Festival. It was a blast!

Snow sculptures were absolutely everywhere, though the
main attraction was a large ceremony held on a gigantic stage made entirely
out of snow (1300 truckloads full of snow, they say). For roughly two
hours we watched musical performances, kimono exhibitions (Tokamachi was
formerly a major manufacturer of kimonos) and fireworks. They say the
festival is as good as the Hokkaido Snow Festival.

Oh, did I mention I put up a gallery?
Click on any of the pictures or go through the gallery
page. But hurry, this seal thing is creeping me out.

In case you were wondering, the last post wasn’t
mean to be a Valentine’s Day post. Also for the record, the best
Valentine’s Day song not specifically about Valentine’s Day
ever is Lou Reed’s “Goodnight
Ladies.” I’m going to bed now.

“Oh, woh, woh. Something tells me that you’re
really gone/you said we could be friends/ but that’s not what I
want/ Ah, Anyway, my TV dinner’s almost done, it’s a lonely
Saturday Night.” ~Lou Reed

Sorry for the lag, I went to an international education
conference all day last Saturday and needed the time off. I will attempt
to make this update short so as to allow time to complete updating the
archives page before my English class
tonight.

Somehow, I don’t think I was the target audience
for the conference. For one, the conference focused on activities to question
our own (and out students’ own) perceptions of foreign countries
whereas I teach international pop-culture. I feel inadequate when I state
my job that way so let me rephrase that; I teach international pop-culture
in order to show my students that people in foreign countries make things
(and feel things) similar to their own country in the hopes that they
find something interesting enough to learn more about the foreign culture
from which it comes. In short, the conference and I were on polar opposites
of the international education spectrum.

It didn’t help that bad timing combined with the
conference format resulted in me presenting an absurdly bad image of myself.
Example: The self-introduction process took three steps; the first was
that we explain our name, position and hobbies to a partner, then that
partner introduces us to two other people, then that four-person group
introduces us to the audience at large. I introduced myself to my partner
as thus; “Hi, my name is Dan, I’m a Coordinator for International
Relations. I like movies, computers and music.” She asked me what
sort of music and movies I liked, and I replied, “well, lately I’ve
been watching a lot of horror movies but mostly I watch romantic comedies,
I like all sorts of music.” She responds, “ “well, do
you like rock music?” and I counter, “yes, I like rock music
too.”

So, then she introduces me to the group, “This
is Dan, he’s an Organizer for International Relations in Matsunoyama.
He likes horror movies, computers and rock music.”

The group asks what I do at my job, “organize
international events, translate, and teach English at the local Junior
High.” Then they all introduce me to the crowd, “this is Dan,
he teaches English conversation in Matsunoyama. He likes rock music and
watching horror movies.”

Gyaagyagyagyaaa, I should have corrected them when they
introduced me, “Hi, my name is Dan, I like horror movies and rock
music and I want to date your daughter.”

Sometimes I get too carried away when I talk about architecture.
I was reading through four paragraphs of a site update I planned to upload
yesterday when it struck me how dry architectural writing can be without
pictures. I scrapped the article and am re-writing it today…and
next time I veer into architectural analysis (gastrointestinal window
installation not withstanding) I will take photographs of what I am talking
about.

I bought a guitar! Epiphone 1956 model Les Paul Goldtop
reissue: it sounds pretty extravagant but you can buy them across Japan
for around $375. The guitar had mocked me all across Tokyo too, with its
retro-style soapbar humbuckers that alchemically convert the sound emanating
from the guitar’s golden body into pure tin.

Out in the country, though, they don’t deal with
the volume that stores in Ochanomizu would handle, so they have time to
play with the instruments. Tighten the truss rod and tweak the pickups
a little bit, and that Korean-made Les Paul knock-off starts to sound
a lot better. I think I like inaka music stores.

My guitar is beautiful, with its luscious curves and
metallic luster. I imagine that the paint job is similar to what my old
car would have looked like when new. But I do not mention that too
loudly, and definitely not in the guitar’s presence. I will be neither
the first nor last person to compare either a guitar or a car to a woman,
but I will tell you this: if the analogy holds I imagine my new guitar
wouldn’t appreciate being compared to 1973 gremlin with a fat ass.

Anyway, while I was buying my guitar I found the first
cool store I have seen in Niigata. It looked like a bunch of friends had
pooled their money together and converted a single shop-space into a micro-mall
with DYI T-shirt boutique, obscure comic book store and an underground
music store. The music store was full of Pizzicato Five and Choclot CDs,
and the makeshift walls were awash in Weezer shirts and posters. While
buying Bird’s latest album I commented that the owner must be a
big Weezer fan, the guy running the register retorted by saying I looked
like Rivers Cuomo.

The great thing about living in Matsunoyama is that
on the slightest whim I can run off to the hot springs. I had survived
looking through maybe half of the websites submitted to the Tokamachi
Multimedia Festival before it became irrefutably apparent that I needed
to spend some time boiling myself in sulfur with a bunch of naked men.

The hot springs were probably the high point of the
day since the multimedia festival was a bust. The majority of the festival
was tech people from various Japanese companies showing off GPS devices
and streaming video, which may have been interesting, I guess, if I didn’t
happen to have grown up in Silicon Valley. The festival was held in Tokamachi’s
Johokan (Information Building), a library meets convention center housed
in an architecturally intriguing building.

While the exterior of the building was Spartan the division
of its interior space into several tiers with a central foyer I found
innovative. Well, that and the washitsu cubicles the architect had intended
for magazine reading. I would have pictures here but there was an old
man reading in the cubicle I wanted to photograph.

It strikes me that Matsunoyama, Matsudai and Tokamachi
are all municipalities that try to compensate for their lack of people
by amplifying their arts. The Johokan is only one example in a long line
of architectural curiosities here; Kenali, the House of Light, Kyororo,
the Matsudai Snowland Agrarian Arts Center, and The Dream House are all
post-modern architectural oddities in otherwise traditionally Japanese
villages.

The fun doesn’t stop at architecture of course;
there are modern art festivals and large outdoor sculptures (most of which
are enveloped in ice right now), poster exhibitions and stop-the war concerts.
And there’s no need to leave out the hip micro-mall in Joetsu. Add
it all together and the middle of nowhere actually looks pretty hip.

This all struck me yesterday as I was paying for my
soba in Matsudai yesterday. Next to the cash register was a display of
soba Valentine’s Day gift sets with the most out-of-placedly hip
design likely ever to grace a box of soba. The concept of soba for Valentine’s
Day struck me as odd until I read the packaging, “Watashi wa anata
no soba ga ii”, which translates to either “I like your soba”,
or alternatively, “I like to be by your side” depending on
how you translate “soba”. Naruhodo

I felt weird asking to take pictures at the restaurant
so I bought a box to photograph. Maybe I’ll give it to my guitar
for White Day. Actually, yesterday I got a letter from “suteki na
deai” (translation: “a wonderful encounter!”), maybe
I’ll send it to them.

Oh, for those of you new to the Szkandelous game, the
old page has been moved to the archives,
though you can also just click previous
entry at the bottom of the page (I should tell you, it is late tonight
so I am going to update the main archive page tomorrow. Until then just
use the previous entry links.