Around three hours later, I found myself on the Quidditch Pitch. Potter and I had both taken specific courses, while all our other mutual friends hadn’t decided as of yet what they wanted, and ended up taking whatever they could get into. We both had Transfiguration, Defence, Charms, Arithmacy, History of Magic, Potions and Astronomy. We were now on the quidditch pitch, bored to the bone. At least, I was.

Potter finally caught up with me and grinned.

“So, Malfoy, wonderful day isn’t it?” he said.

“Please tell me you’re not trying to chat me up. I think I puked a little in my mouth,” I said tonelessly.

He glared at me. “Your sister and my brother need to get into a broom cupboard and fast. My cousin and your brother need to shag till all their animosity goes out the window. And I know you agree with me.”

“That doesn’t shed light on why you’re still here,” I said, ready to move off again.

“What if I offered you a deal? I know how to get Al to grow a pair.”

“Is that so? What happened with the no intervention plan?” I said.

“It flew out the window after that sickening display in the Great Hall.”

I snickered. Trust Potter to find that adorable display disgusting.

“In the summer, I mentioned it to him. He has it in his head that the two of us are meant to be. And he said that if we get together and get out of denial, he’ll do something about it,” he said.

“Oh no. You are NOT dragging me into one of your ‘plans’!”

“We just need to let him catch us snogging or something, and he’ll believe it. And he’ll finally ask her out!”

I was quiet for a moment.

“No.”

“Malfoy!”

“What’s in it for you? Or me, for that matter?”

“For you, the opportunity to snog the most snoggable boy in the school.”

“I puked in my mouth again.”

“And I get to snog the most snoggable girl. And manage to convince my mom I’m capable of stable relationships.”

“Ew, to the first part. And as for the second, I can’t believe your mom agrees with me.”

“Malfoy! Stop diverting the topic!”

“Ok, fine. But this is only for a while. Till Rose and Scorp shag and Al and Elaine are happy together. Clear?”

“Crystal.”

“Merlin, kill me now,” I groaned and sped off to avoid his response, which was bound to be filled with testosterone-friendly perverted ideas.

-x-x-x-x-

I sighed as I entered the Gryffindor Commons, and my eyes met Potter’s for a moment. His lips twitched and I glared as I walked past.

“Hey, Malfoy! Scorpius was asking for you!” he called, and I turned and stormed past him.

“Someone’s got her knickers in a twist,” muttered Potter as he got up and followed me.

“Why are you following me?”

“Did you really think Scorpius was calling you? Al has prefect duties in the dungeon tonight.”

“Oh lord. Couldn’t you at least wait for me to accept the plan?”

“It has to be tonight. The sooner we get this over with, the better.”

I groaned. Why me? I must have been Voldermort in my past life, and Hitler before that. That was probably why Karma was being SUCH a freaking bitch.

We tiptoed into the dungeon. “Ok, so Al is about 5 minutes from here. We have that much time to look like we’ve been snogging each other behind their backs,” said James, and shoved his map into his back pocket.

Before he could say anything else, I slammed my lips against his. He growled, and immediately responded.

James opened his mouth, and instead of what I was hoping would be a denial, he let out a ‘yes’.

He seemed confused as well. Al whooped. “I was right! I was right!” he chanted while doing a weird dance.

“I’m guessing this means you approve?” I said.

“Family night!” he sang and ran off.

“We should be worried, right?” I said, once he was gone.

“For his sanity or for our lives?” he said. We thought.

“Definitely both,” we said, at the same time.

-x-x-x-x-

That was how, merely an hour later, we found ourselves an audience in the form of the Wotter clan plus two (my siblings). They all looked like they were torn between disbelief and smugness. And why wouldn’t they. I was sitting on James Potter’s lap, and wasn’t trying to strangle him while doing so. And James Potter’s arms were wrapped around me, his arm slowly inching lower and lower.

I growled and leaned towards his ear. “ Move your hand from my arse before I rip it from your body,” I hissed into it, my nails gently moving down his chest to make it look like I was being seductive.

“Oi! Lovers! Impatient and worried relatives and friends waiting for an explanation! We don’t need the PDA!” bellowed Fred, and I moved away and looked at Scorpius, who looked ready to kill Potter.

I snickered. Potter mumbled.

“For the original guy with the plan, you’re clueless as hell,” I whispered, and he grinned sheepishly.

“Cuz you’re so easy to depend on?”

“Wrong answer.”

“Cuz I love you so much, you sexy vixen you,” he said, and I smirked. This was hilarious. James Potter was just as clueless as I made him out to be. Maybe even worse. He came up with the plan and he has no back-up story.

“It was last year, after the OWLs. We were really stressed, and as a relief we randomly started picking fights with each other.”

“I remember that! Fred and I avoided you guys like crazy!” said Dom.

“Exactly. On one of those fights, which happened quite late, near the Kitchens, we were getting real personal. And somehow, we found ourselves snogging.”

“What? That’s it?” said Lily, pouting.

I grinned at her. “We ignored it beautifully, after all who can possibly be more stubborn that James and me….with an exception of Rose and Scorp, of course.”

“I don’t like what you’re implying,” said Rose, her eyes narrowing into slits.

James’ arms tightened their hold. What a big wuss. He’s scared of his baby cousin.

“Then it happened again. And again. Finally, we decided it was happening too much for our liking and we decided to talk it out. And that’s when we decided to give ‘us’ a chance. It was going on for most of the summer. But we didn’t really send letters, cuz we didn’t want to get caught. After all, you’d probably do some weird Wotter victory dance, like the one Al did, and expect me to join in. No thank you. Oh, and James thought it’d be nice to live through the summer, since Scorp was staying over at his.”

Everyone rolled their eyes. Scorpius was known to have a sister-complex. And it didn’t help that he had two very eligible sisters either. He was just as protective of us as any of the Wotter guys were when Wotter girls came into the picture. Even though I was older than him.

“So that’s it,” I said shrugging, and it seemed the entire group bought it. We were both well known for holding our prides in high-esteem.

They dispersed, no doubt to alert the school of the upcoming apocalypse, and James and I were left alone.

“Remember Potter,” I hissed in his ear. “We stop the moment they all get together.”

“Like I want to be stuck with you for that long,” he growled, his hands skimming down and stopping at the small of my back.

I twitched as electricity shot up my spine when he touched me there.

"Well, we better go to sleep. After all, we have a big day ahead of us," said James grinning cheesily.

I glared at him, but allowed him to kiss me, because we were not exactly alone in the common room, and we had to put up a good act.

He pulled away, chuckling.

I raised an eyebrow, puzzled. When he refused to explain, I shrugged and got off him.

"Night, Artemis," he said, pulling me in for another kiss.

"Night James," i replied, wondering why he wanted to kiss me so much.

I shrugged it off. James was wierd. I already knew that.

But that didn't exactly make it any less disturbing.

AN

Ha! Poor Potter! And poor Artemis, the girl must be TRAUMATIZED. (Though it seems odd she's so ok with letting him kiss her...)

Well, I apologize for the late update, but well, Real Life sucks. I’ve had exams for the past 4 freaking months. It’ll all be over in May, so I guess the updates will be more frequent. But other than that, I’m currently trying to finish another chapter of my experimental Regulus/OC fic Sacrilege, and finishing touches for Troublesome’s next chapter are well underway.

Also, I may or may not be in love with Castiel and Dean from Supernatural. And I may have a creepy crush on both Jake Abel and Logan Lerman. So if they appear in any shape or form in my fics, don’t be surprised. They most probably will.

Also, one I finish a few more chapters, I’m thinking of getting someone to make those Chapter banner thingies…I dunno what the exact term is. But if you think it’d be a good idea, do tell.

And VOILA! The latest chapter of Apocalypse is complete!

(applause)

And thanks for the awesome reviews! And do review again, you’ll all get extra cookies!