My neighbor's hot, shirtless son, recently home from college, is outside setting up for their garage sale.

He looks like a Men's Health cover come to life. Lord give me strenght. The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, the wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round...

by Anonymous

reply 64

07/06/2013

Op = cougar.

by Anonymous

reply 1

06/29/2013

Go on over and be sure to mention how hot he's grown up to be. Twice.

by Anonymous

reply 2

06/29/2013

Useless without pictures. Surely you need to go garage aale-ing RIGHT NOW, neighbor.

by Anonymous

reply 3

06/29/2013

Mamma will be by to pick up some bric 'n' brac 'n' knick 'n' knack 'n' things. If he passes Mamma's look 'n' sniff test Mamma will try and pick up a college joy boy for the evening.

Your description has Mamma's mussy dripping like a swamp cooler on a hot, humid, steamy afternoon.

Time to freshen up my best MuuMuu in the drier with a Febreeze spritz!

Mamma like!

by Anonymous

reply 4

06/29/2013

People still do garage sales?

by Anonymous

reply 5

06/29/2013

His pecs are like granite, and his nipple placement is perfection. That can't be genetics, because his father is a bit dumpy looking.

by Anonymous

reply 6

06/29/2013

Gee, R6...maybe he's a....queerboy!

by Anonymous

reply 7

06/29/2013

Yes, r5, and as long as you continue to be a proudly naive imbecile, people will continue to have garage sales.

by Anonymous

reply 8

06/29/2013

R8 ?????????????????????

by Anonymous

reply 9

06/29/2013

R9. Let R8 be, her 2nd hand Compaq was slow to boot up this morning and it has her nipples all twisted.

by Anonymous

reply 10

06/29/2013

OP...hope you have a Mr. Clean miracle eraser to clean the spooge off the wall under the window you are being a curtain sister from!

by Anonymous

reply 12

06/29/2013

Get pictures~

by Anonymous

reply 13

06/29/2013

I'll save the smegma for you, r14.

by Anonymous

reply 15

06/29/2013

OP are you openly out to your neighbors?

by Anonymous

reply 16

06/29/2013

This is why I hate us.

Get away from the fucking window!

by Anonymous

reply 17

06/29/2013

"He went on to joke that Scott is probably getting laid everytime he calls."

Does his dad live in a temporal pocket, hailing from the 1960's? What dad discusses his son's sex life with anyone, much less a stranger?

by Anonymous

reply 18

06/29/2013

Garage sales are not allowed in my neighborhood.

by Anonymous

reply 19

06/29/2013

From the 1960s? Welcome to 2013 R18. People are more frank about topics that used to considered private and personal. And it was just a joke, not actually talking about his sex life.

And really? Of course people are going to look at an attractive person. There is nothing unusual about that R17.

by Anonymous

reply 20

06/29/2013

[quote]He went on to joke that Scott is probably getting laid everytime he calls.

That's a rather strange remark. Kids ignore their parents' calls all the time, because they're kids and don't want to be checked up on. That was a weird comment.

by Anonymous

reply 21

06/29/2013

OP's little Edie costume for the day is her five sizes too small leather hot-pants,black fish-net tank top,and ballet flats.

Don't forget to rub an ice cube on your nips just before you pop over!

by Anonymous

reply 22

06/29/2013

Let's hear some further adventures of OP.

by Anonymous

reply 23

07/01/2013

What's a garage sale?

by Anonymous

reply 24

07/01/2013

holy crap

by Anonymous

reply 25

07/03/2013

We're still waiting for photos, OP.

by Anonymous

reply 26

07/03/2013

Wow. Even something as innocuous as a good view makes the oldies here jealous.

by Anonymous

reply 27

07/03/2013

OP pushed it too far. Now he's tied to a post in the back yard sucking off the guy.

by Anonymous

reply 28

07/03/2013

[quote] her 2nd hand Compaq was slow to boot up this morning and it has her nipples all twisted.

I LOVE it when my nipples get twisted.

YUM!

by Anonymous

reply 29

07/03/2013

This is so silly

by Anonymous

reply 30

07/03/2013

Fall and pretend to break your hip in the backyard, then call out HELP ME, HELPPPP MEEEEEEE ... he'll come running and swaddle you in his masculine arms.

by Anonymous

reply 31

07/03/2013

I overheard him and his dad arguing last night. Scott's mother passed away a few years ago, and Scott's dad since remarried. His new wife is rocking hot. In my feverish, devilish mind, the dad caught Scott fucking his step-mother. It can't be easy for her. She has this beautiful man of raw masculinity walking around the house shirtless. It would too much for any normal human being to take.

by Anonymous

reply 32

07/03/2013

I'll try to find a pic. I know he was photographed with a few other students for the new cover of his college's catalog. He's THAT telegenic, I guess. I will try to find that one, but I doubt he'll be shirtless hahahaha

by Anonymous

reply 34

07/03/2013

Let's go, OP. Post the pictures.

by Anonymous

reply 35

07/05/2013

Please tell me the boy is not 18 and a college freshman? I'm hoping at least 21...please don't be a pedo, OP.

by Anonymous

reply 36

07/06/2013

Have you thought about offering him a nickel to bust up a chiffarobe for you?

by Anonymous

reply 37

07/06/2013

OP = Pope Benedick

by Anonymous

reply 38

07/06/2013

Does your bf (who you claim to have cheated on with his ex) know you lust after your neighbor's son, OP?

by Anonymous

reply 39

07/06/2013

"The boy" would have to be 14 or under- or at least appear to be in that age group- for the op to be a "pedo", r36.

by Anonymous

reply 40

07/06/2013

Are we really 40 posts into this with no one finding the earlier version of this saga?

Or at least alluding to where we left off?

by Anonymous

reply 41

07/06/2013

R40 it's still nasty.

by Anonymous

reply 42

07/06/2013

Garage sales, Pffftttt....

Oh, dear.

What kind of family does this young man come from? No one has garage sales anymore. No one with any class, at least.

Dears, if you are short on cash try selling your soiled junk on ebay, or to a private seller, or maybe to a store.

I know, it's laughable and absurd that this garage sale with its hot, shirtless college boy setting up the tables doesn't exist in a purely digital, downloadable form (way more convenient that way), but some people are just still so pathetically BACKWARD.

by Anonymous

reply 46

07/06/2013

OP, go over and engage him in a conversation in which you ask him if he'll be selling any of his underwear in the garage sale, and advise him that it'll probably fetch a higher price if he doesn't wash it first. This is just the right way to subtly telegraph your interest in him to see if he responds.

by Anonymous

reply 47

07/06/2013

I should have a garage sale and get rid of my cathode ray tv, and maybe my records (or else buy a turntable).

by Anonymous

reply 48

07/06/2013

What has replaced the Advocate pink pages as the place to sell your soiled subtrou in the 21st century?

by Anonymous

reply 49

07/06/2013

R44?

by Anonymous

reply 50

07/06/2013

R45, inviting unwanted denizens into the neighborhood who take up the parking spaces, clog traffic, and acquire an opportunity to case the neighborhood for future burglaries is NOT a good idea.

Secondly, there are so many fucking weirdos that one shouldn't advertise where children live.

Why invite the general unwashed public onto your street and expose your neighbors privacy so that you can sell your dirty bras, R45?

by Anonymous

reply 51

07/06/2013

Garage sales, pffftt...

So tacky, so very, very, tacky.

Ugh.

Oh, dear.

Germy.

Soiled.

Classless.

Multiple sleeve and neck tattoos.

Ugh.

Such horror.

by Anonymous

reply 52

07/06/2013

Glad I don't live with the level of fear R51 R44 faces every moment of his existence on this planet. Mommy must have pumped him full of "stranger danger" terror from the day he could think.

by Anonymous

reply 53

07/06/2013

r51, what opportunity does a garage sale give to case the neighborhood for future burglaries that the burglar couldn't get just driving down the street any time he wanted?

by Anonymous

reply 54

07/06/2013

R53 just proudly sold her size 16 pink capri pants that say "Aloha" on the rear end for 25 cents and BOY DID SHE PUT ME IN MY PLACE!

by Anonymous

reply 55

07/06/2013

I recently visited a garage sale held court by a lesbian couple and boy, what a collection!

I saw a well worn, tattered copy of Sybil, what looked like ten years worth of old Cat Fancy magazines, bright pink and yellow used Crocs, a pair of ancient Birkenstocks size ten, a Holly Near album, and dozens of lavender tank tops.

OP, pull a Gladys Kravitz. Wait till the shirtless son is the only one home then grab a measuring cup, go knock on the door and say, "Could you help me? I'm smelling cookies - I mean I'm [italic]baking[/italic]cookies and I need to borrow a cup, sugar. Er, that is, a cup OF sugar. I brought my own, you see, I just need to cup yours. Your sugar that is! Oh, I feel faint!"

Then toss the cup aside and collapse in his arms.

by Anonymous

reply 58

07/06/2013

Don't forget to ask him if he wants some sugar from you. Summer break's no fun without an allowance.

by Anonymous

reply 59

07/06/2013

Entice him into your lair with the lure of dope and porn.

by Anonymous

reply 60

07/06/2013

Garage sale ?? Isn't this what Amazon Marketplace (or even Craigslist) are for now ??

by Anonymous

reply 61

07/06/2013

[all posts by tedious troll removed.]

by Anonymous

reply 62

07/06/2013

[quote]Pic or it didn't happen.

I think R58 painted a pretty elaborate picture.

by Anonymous

reply 63

07/06/2013

Don't you need someone to help you paint a room, or clean out your cellar or garage, OP?

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