~ A Philosophic Life

Why do Tantriks talk about sex?

I’ve been lucky enough in my travels to meet a few Tantriks who were not trying to sell me anything, nor did they want anything from me: they never spoke about sex. They laugh at the west and their so called Tantric sex cults and the culture of permissiveness that has grown from the idea that we can somehow become enlightened if we can just have better sex.

When ever I have heard these less lustful Tantriks talk about sex, it’s been as a metaphor. We all know how overwhelming sexual desire can be. Our entire focus will shift to sex so that everything else that was in our minds is gone. One pointed in focus we take action to get what we want: satisfaction; a feeling of fullness that quenches all desires. The moments of orgasm they liken to the more eternal blessing of having your true desires fulfilled. But of course the orgasm of sex is over in a few moments and the feeling of fullness quickly begins to fade, especially when the feeling that we’ve perhaps chosen our partner too hastily stars to set in.

To continue the metaphor of sex, most of us these days know that the difference between average sex and good sex has little to do with the physical action and everything to do with how much heart the couple put into it. The more you attach by heart with your partner and the moment, the more intense will be orgasm as well as the feeling of fullness you receive.

Tantriks like to ask: “What do you want?” They push you to get to know yourself and become aware of your desires and discover what it is you truly want; your lasting desire. There’s nothing wrong with fulfilling your desires, but learn from them, use your experience to figure out what it is you really want. As you discover deeper and deeper desires you will discover that you are willing to sacrifice many lesser desires for the bigger one. Thru such sacrifice you will build more power and resolve to achieve the greater desire which in turn will make the satisfaction that much greater.

Tantrism is very practical. It’s not the mystical practice it’s so often portrayed as. Sure it takes a different view of The world, but it’s no hocus-pocus. All the knowledge of Tantrismis is contained in our actions: our hopes, desires, wisdom, will and joy. Just look at yourself, learn from your elders, learn from your experience, learn from sharing, and then put it all into practice in the direction you want to go. Moksha will be there only when you hold your desire and your direction firmly without going here and there and everywhere.

Today the world is full of youths who want Moksha, but they want it now and when they don’t get it, they move on. There is nothing wrong with this, everyone must follow their heart, and without age and experience the youth cannot be expected to know their heart. Many people in the world maintain their entire lives in fear of looking at what they might have inside, so having this courage at whatever age is a blessing alone, but at a young age we have not so many heart experiences to learn from. And at any age there are few people who know what it is they really want.

Most sages tell us that the greatest longing of the heart is for union with god (with energy), and though many of the tantriks of the west profess to this longing, few sacrifices are being made for it’s attainment. They are often much too busy following every little desire that arises to focus on the bigger picture. This is why moksha is reserved for the end of life, because by then, if we’ve really paid attention, we will have realized by heart and by experience that there really is no such thing as moksha. But if they’ve really been following Tantra way, they will experience the full fullness of life.

Tantrism has nothing to do with sex but everything to do with desire, you just have to keep your head out of the gutter to see it.