If there's one thing we can say about Apple, we'll say it knows how to set the stage. iPod ads feel completely different from Mac ones without deviating too far from the ruling Apple geek-meets-hipster-osity.

With that in mind, the prospect of seeing the new iPhone ads was really exciting, especially since the debut draws near and the bar was set so high with the nostalgic Oscars piece.

Voila: an American Express ad for The Members Project, resulting from a collabo between Lost Planet and Martin Scorsese, via Ogilvy. It is surprisingly likable.

Poking fun at self-satisfied cause-whoring like Gap (red) and Kenneth Cole's Are You Putting Us On?, the spot includes Ellen, Andre Agassi and Sheryl Crow, sitting against a generic backdrop and admonishing the sympathetic to go forth and make a difference.

For those whose ears automatically perked up at Scorsese's name, there's no gunning-down for the cause. But amid the usual vagaries about doing your part, a casually-dressed guy (Tim from the office next door!) suddenly walks across the shot and points out the importance of keeping Lake Winnipesakee clean.

This sparks confusion between the stars and a general, if hesitant, admission that Lake Winnipesakee is probably worth keeping clean.

The spot ends with an empty stool and the usual closing jibjab about submitting your idea to website X. The winning entry gets not $10,000 (the going idea rate) but a whopping $5 million, which may mean this contest is actually worth someone's while.

Consequent two-second bummed feeling aside, we thought the in-the-box effect was mighty clever. But one could probably argue CNN more distracts than informs, because while the watchers idly admire us looking doe-eyed and confused, their houses are being robbed/hit by helicopters/scorched.

Slogan: "Be the first to know." Right, so you don't find out during 15 minutes of consequent lame, post-disaster.

We're taken by the infectious pulse of this Spanish Nike ad by Villarosas and production team Agosto. Dubbed Momentum, it showcases an underground battle between famous sports stars, flanked by gypsy drummers.

The audience, which ranges in flavor from urban grit to the polished elite, share a proud-faced intensity that pretty much embodies the emotional Nike ethos.

The press release calls "Momentum" a recognition to "the optimum moment that Spanish sport enjoys." Nice way to put it.

Translation of the closing challenge: "Are you brave enough to be the next?"

For its new geo-specific campaign "You Rule," meant to push its no-commitment cell phone service, Virgin Mobile made a big oops in the Big Apple, installing neighborhood-specific ads in the wrong neighborhoods.

This wouldn't be a huge issue if not for the fact that some wrongly-placed ads are actually trashing the neighborhoods they've found themselves in.

To note, an unspecified number of Upper West Side posters have been placed on the Upper East Side. And they say really clever things like, "...because up here it's not cool to be tied down and uptight. If you want to live like that, move to Greenwich, or at least across the park."

In case you wondered what happened to Buddy Lee, he's taking advantage of his height and conducting ass inspections.

This winning spot demonstrates for maybe the umpteenth time that most anything can be sold with a whole lot of ass and a whole lot of tacked-on moan tracks. And while we've never felt inclined to see another person's southern comfort that close, we're sure somebody got off on it, which means the ad wasn't completely for naught.

Under the playful slogan "Where's the Angus," Jack in the Box released an ad in which Jack shows JITB employees where sirloin is located on a cow.

In the ad, one employee points out that the competition is selling Angus Burgers and asks where "the Angus area of the cow" is located. After a pause, the puzzled Jack, standing beside the, uh, rear region of the illustration, says, "I'd rather not." End spot with the usual brand roll-up.

But the cute schoolyard poke is not the funniest part. Apparently the butthurt (read: peevishly pissed-off) CKE Restaurants, whose Carls Jr. chain pushes the Angus, is taking Jack to court.

The paperwork claims the ad (and others under the same slogan) creates "The erroneous notion that all cuts of Angus beef are derived from the anus of beef cattle."

Before you point and laugh, step back and remember how upset you felt when some boy looked at you and asked if you had a pencil sharpener. And you totally fell for it. Then and only then can you fully conceive of the private angst the Angus-pushers must be suffering.

We've never felt more inclined to run a hand across the hood of a vehicle and hope against hope that the finish will come off. Plus, there's something so psychologically soothing about Poppins. Thanks Shedwa for the good word.