Thanksgiving with Tebow would be nigh intolerable. I barely have room in my heart for the annoyance at the 10-second hypocritical sham of a prayer I already endure from my family before Thanksgiving dinner.

I'd rather have Jesus and George Carlin over, because honestly I think they'd get along really, really well.

And maybe Kirk Cameron, so Jesus and George could mock him the whole time, but in that way that Kirk would think they liked him and were agreeing, when really they were just giggling behind his back the whole time. And Jesus would turn Kirk's water into wine after he drank it, and suddenly Kirk would be fumbling around the living room, drunker than Lootie.

And of course, while Kirk is passed out on the sofa, Jesus would shave a strip down his head and Carlin would draw a giant p-nis on his face! And then we would play BattleShots and Balderdash. And Jesus would kick ass at both of them.

Having Big Bird over for Thanksgiving dinner would just be cruel.Lady Gaga would probably show up wearing the turkey, and that would get awkward fast.I'd have no problem with having Obama over. The legion of screaming Tea Partiers following him around to berate him for "impositing on AMERICAN's hospitaly" (spelling, grammar, and capitalization theirs) are another matter entirely.Tebow... well, I guess if said grace or something, that might be kind of cool. Otherwise, I can't say I feel one way or the other.

Well yeah. We already had President Obama over for a prior fantasy thanksgiving. Lady Gaga would wear the dinner, Big Bird would be the dinner, so that leaves Tebow. Hey, it's the one day when even most people who don't say grace say grace, and it would prevent him from contributing to the Jets' suckage later that day. I like it; Tebow it is.

INeedAName:I'd rather have Jesus and George Carlin over, because honestly I think they'd get along really, really well.

And maybe Kirk Cameron, so Jesus and George could mock him the whole time, but in that way that Kirk would think they liked him and were agreeing, when really they were just giggling behind his back the whole time. And Jesus would turn Kirk's water into wine after he drank it, and suddenly Kirk would be fumbling around the living room, drunker than Lootie.

And of course, while Kirk is passed out on the sofa, Jesus would shave a strip down his head and Carlin would draw a giant p-nis on his face! And then we would play BattleShots and Balderdash. And Jesus would kick ass at both of them.