It was a happy day, feeling great. Sun
shining, no clouds and the locals with their canine kids we passed on
the trail behind my house, were full of smiles and general
pleasantries.

Maybe it wasn't such a bad place to
live after all. Perhaps I've been harsh..just a tad. My response to
the 'do you like where you live?' question is generally met with a
built up frustrated rant of how my suburb is soulless, has zero
community spirit, has not enough accessible infrastructure and is full of
bogans and hoons. There are constant tyre skid marks on our street
and I am woken in the middle of the night most weekends, by the
sounds of motorbikes burning rubber along the trail I run along
every day.

Plus you can't get a decent coffee
anywhere. Anywhere.

Anyway..back to it.

Upon arriving home I realised the
little master was still asleep. Not keen to risk waking him, I backed
out of our door way and continued walking the pram up our street
(much to Buddy dog's disgust and pleas from behind our fence of 'take
meeee with youuuu, wooooof!').

Then I saw him.

I had just crossed a road and in his
hotted up blue Astra (Astra? Yes..I laughed too) he flew around the
roundabout past me, fumes streaming from the exhaust then cornered
the street that I had just walked over.

I turned back to shake my head and out
of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of the car spinning down
the street.

Oh my Astra, he has lost control.

I started running back towards the
street. Little master still dozing away. I had already started
mentally playing out images of me shaking my finger at him and his
smashed up car shouting 'that's what happens when you hoooon!!' tusk
tusk!

But the car was nowhere to be seen.
Maybe he hadn't lost it. But he was flying and I swear I saw that car
spinning.

I slowed down my pace and power walked
down the street which was actually a court. I found his car at the
end of the court parked. But he was gone. Damn it. I didn't know why
I was so drawn to finding him. But there I was, rocking my pram,
hovering between his car and his front yard. Feeling defeated, I went
to walk away.

Then he appeared.

Then I shat my pants and questioned
what the hell I was doing.

I don't know this person, he could be
anyone. Yet with council workers spraying weeds only a few meters
away I felt like I had a security buffer.

He was young, probably mid 20's, fit
looking and had a friendly face.

He took one look at me and realised why
I was there. He knew very well who I was.

Then the following occurred.

Hoon who drives a hotted up Astra:
Smiles, 'G'day, how ya doing?'

AP: Damnit, I'm a sucker for
a friendly smile and he seems not bogan like at all. 'Hi there, I'm
alright thanks. Was that you before? In that blue car? Did you come
around that corner?'Friendly hoon who drives a hotted up
Astra: 'Yeah, just before, yeah down this street?'AP: 'Yes, in that car did you
fly around that corner and the roundabout? I had just
walked over that road..'

Coy looking hoon who drives a hotted
up Astra: 'But I saw ya..'

AP: 'Yeah I know you saw me and
that's great but you were going so fast.'Repetitive hoon who drives a hotted
up Astra: 'But I saw ya..'AP: 'Please, please just
slow down. I ran back because I thought you had lost control. One day
you could hurt someone..or you could hurt yourself.'

Then..wait for it...wait, it's a douzy.
I said this:

'And...and, well..you seem like a
lovely young man and it's just not worth it.'