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Monthly Archives: July 2016

So I went through Brady’s phone and read his messages with Tia. In my defense though, he was sitting right there and said I could look through his phone.

Anyway, I fucking hate her. Apparently she has a sugar daddy who pays all her bills and gives her a ton of spending money to live on (like $3,500 a month). That’s more than some people make working at a job. She and Brady were texting about it and he said, “You must be doing something amazing to make a man spend money on you like that.”

And she said, “Well I am Asian after all. ;-)”

Like ew. I know what she means by that. I never thought she had class before, but I definitely know she doesn’t now. Since we were on the subject of Tia anyway, I asked Brady if he was attracted to her. Because those are the things I want to know (to make myself miserable obviously).

“I think she’s pretty, but attracted to her? No,” Brady answered.

“Liar. You’d pay all her bills too if you were given the opportunity,” I said. “Have you hooked up with her before?”

He almost like flinched. Like the question was so offensive and revolting. “No! Why would you ask that?”

“Because I feel like I have to,” I said.

“Of course not. Jeez. No,” he scoffed.

I kind of enjoyed Brady being so offended. But then I pestered him a little bit about his relationship with her. And he told me that once they were out with their friends, drunk of course, and they hugged. But when they pulled away, they didn’t exactly pull away and she kept her arms around his neck and he kept his hands around her waist. Why would he tell me that?

“Show me,” I demanded.

And then Brady stood up and demonstrated the position they were in, putting my hands in the position Tia’s were in. I thought he’d laugh and tell me to stop being ridiculous, that it wasn’t that big of a deal, etc, but he did it with a straight and serious face. So we were standing there like we were slow dancing at prom.

“Inappropriate,” I declared.

He shrugged and then nodded. “Yeah.”

I couldn’t even bring myself to fight with him about it, but it just solidified my hatred for her. Plus, obviously they aren’t speaking or hanging out like they used to, so I was just thinking, “Well, at least she’s out of the picture now.” And get this – she texted Brady earlier this week, seeing if he wanted Lolla tickets because she had a friend selling some. He didn’t respond and she said something like, “I get that your girlfriend hates me, but I don’t want that to get in the way of our friendship. You should be able to hang out with whoever you want to hang out with no matter what situation is going on.”

She’s obviously smoking crack again. Who is she to tell Brady who he should be allowed to hang out with? And she hasn’t even acknowledged the fact that one. she stole my bracelet and two. Brady screamed at her and made her feel like shit about it. What a true sociopath.

Brady’s mom called my mom and apparently they had a pretty long conversation. It was weird to me that Brady’s mom was so adamant about talking to my mom. What did she need to talk to my mom about that she couldn’t talk to me about? Apparently, she wanted to voice her concerns.

1. Brady and I haven’t known each other long. Did we even know each other well enough to get married?

2. I’ve switched jobs a lot. Is my career stable?

3. Am I emotionally stable? (Rude)

4. Did I plan on contributing financially since moving in with Brady? (He purchased the home for himself and himself only).

But she did say that they have a family jeweler who would be able to custom make any ring I wanted. Why would she say that if she has all these concerns about everything? She also said, “I like Reese, I do. If Brady likes her, then I do.” Which seems like such a back handed, passive aggressive thing to say. And also, “We may not have anything in common besides our children, but if this actually happens, then I want all of us to spend more time together.” Which made my mom to say she’s uptight and pretentious.

My mom has always thought I was being a baby when I told her about Brady’s mom, but she finally saw it for herself. In the end, my mom said, “If you and Brady want to get married, you know you have my full support. If you try to wait until you have that woman’s approval, you’ll never be married.” My mom may be crazy, but she’s so sweet and supportive of literally anything I do. I wish everyone could experience a mother like that.

I hung out with my new 22 year old friend, Ava, last week. She’s just so perfect. Her skin is bomb, her hair is bomb and her eyes are bomb. And of course, she’s tiny and athletic and if I didn’t love her, I would hate her.

We talked about being crazy girlfriends. She has a long term boyfriend who she moved to Chicago to be with. They were long distance for a while and had a lot of trust issues. So we exchanged stories and it made me not feel as bad about trying to use Brady’s thumb while he was sleeping to get into his phone, sending Jessica that Facebook message, and physically fighting Devin once a week while we were in college. But I must admit, I got some good ideas from her.

“Why are we like this?” I asked.

“Guys make us like this,” she replied and she’s right. We’ll blame it all on the guys.

Speaking of crazy, I really wanted access to Brady’s email so I thought I’d try to guess his password. And I guessed it on the first try – with the capitalization and numbers and everything. It annoyed me because he makes it easy to snoop. I texted him telling him that he needs to think of a more creative password for his stuff.

Anna emails him a lot. She asks him to read things she writes and give her feedback. Or she sends him articles about current events and stuff and then they have full conversations through email about it. Brady and I rarely talk about that kind of stuff (I’m just not interested), but maybe we should. He probably thinks I’m so stupid and uninformed. Brady didn’t reply to my text, but yelled at me about it when he got home. I gave him my Tucker pouty eyes and he calmed down.

He sighed and said, “I respect your privacy so I’d appreciate it if you do the same.”

That made me feel kind of bad, but not really. This is twisted, but I kind of wish Brady would be more interested in who I’m talking to and stuff. Clearly he trusts me and I’m glad for that, but doesn’t he at least think guys are making passes at me? Isn’t he concerned? I know I’m insecure for thinking that, but I can’t help it.

Speaking of which, Scott has been being really nice to me lately. I guess all the sucking up paid off. Every morning he’s been stopping by my office to check in and a couple of times he’s brought me a latte or a green tea. And since I’m being nicer and he’s being nicer, he’s included me in a lot more things. For example, he had a meeting with Mike last week and he let me help him prepare and told me all the things Mike would be looking for (but never outright said he’d be looking for them cuz this is Mike we are talking about). And, no one is supposed to know this yet, but Mike is most likely coming back to Chicago next month for good. Scott thinks he’s having marriage problems. This was a good way to get into talking about Scott’s marriage.

“How’s your wife? I feel like I haven’t seen her in a while,” I said. I’ve only met Scott’s wife once so this was kind of crazy thing to say. Obviously I was fishing for information.

I don’t know if he picked up on it, but Scott didn’t make eye contact with me. “She’s okay. She just started a new job so she’s been really busy. You’ll see more of her soon, I’m sure.”

But the next night, I was working from home and texted Scott asking a question. He sent four back to back messages answering my question and correcting himself and then apologizing.

“Sorry, I’m out with some buddies. I hope that made sense,” he said.

“It did, thank you. I hope you have fun,” I said back.

“Why don’t you meet up with us? I know it’s a bit ugly out, but I owe you a drink for all of your hard work this week.”

“I wish I could, but I promised my boyfriend I’d bake cookies tonight.” I was lying, but I did have plans of baking a batch of lemon cookies. Plus, I wanted to remind him of Brady.

“Too bad. We’ve gotta plan another evening out soon. I could care less of Monica or the others come though. :-)”

I didn’t know what he meant by this, but I could take a guess. I didn’t want to feed into it so I just said, “Okay. :-)”

And then Scott started talking about how he enjoys my company and thinks we work really well together.

Eventually I stopped responding and the following Monday at work, we hung out and didn’t mention any of it. He just wouldn’t let me leave his sight. Every time I’d try to go back to my office, he would stop me and tell me more things he needed help with. And if I did make it back to my own office, he would show up with his laptop so he could work alongside me. For lunch, I told him that I was going to step out and grab something to eat and he wanted to know where I was going and would I be able to pick up a sandwich for him?

Luckily, he’s been traveling the rest of this week so I haven’t had to deal with him, but he’s been texting me constantly. And even sending me pictures of his hotel room and stuff he’s doing. Why are you so obsessed with me? I think he means well though and I can’t be annoyed. At least he isn’t telling me how much I suck or anything.

*This is my 200th post! Thank y’all so much for reading and being supportive these past two years! It’s been a crazy and fun emotional roller coaster and I don’t plan on quitting until y’all ask me to! My life seems a lot less dramatic than it was two years ago – crazy how much things can change. I’m extremely happy now and I hope everyone else is too. Love y’all!!!*

Scott surprised us all and flew home early and showed up to the office on Thursday. He didn’t warn us before hand, but did call me before he arrived to see how everything was going. I let him know that everything was fine and under control. Luckily when he showed up I was finishing up a call with a client and not sitting on Monica’s office floor complaining that I wanted to go home.

“Oh, hey! What are you doing here?” I asked, following him to his office.

“I’ve got a load of things to do that I couldn’t do in New York. You don’t sound excited to see me?” he replied.

“Oh, I’m super excited! We have so much to catch up on,” I said.

Have I mentioned that I’ve started sucking up to Scott lately because I realized that he’s the kind of boss who needs it? He pretends to be super humble, but really, he just wants to be flattered and I’m happy to do it. I mean, you gotta do what you gotta do.

There was a scheduled conference call with Mike that afternoon so Scott and I prepared for it together. Monica had already left for the day so she missed it and this is kind of evil, but I was curious to see what Scott would say to her about the client complaint situation. Monica and I are speaking again, but the whole situation just isn’t okay. I spoke to the client and he was mostly upset with how Monica treated him and how little she was willing to help him. And her treating clients like that makes my job harder.

As if having Scott show up unannounced wasn’t enough, Mike arrived on Friday morning. Even Scott didn’t know he was coming and he took the day off. I was standing at the reception desk, checking my email and Snapchat when I heard Mike say, “Hi, Reese.”

I dropped my phone and stood up straighter. “Hi Mike! It’s so nice to see you!”

He walked past me and kind of frowned, not returning my friendly greeting. Not even five minutes later, he emailed me asking me to meet him in his office. Fuck.

I quickly memorized the quarterly numbers, swished some mouthwash and headed down there. His door was propped open and I stepped inside.

“Hey. You wanted to see me?”

“Yes,” Mike said and just glared at me. I sat down in the chair in front of his desk. “I want to know about the client complaint.”

“Oh, yeah. Sure.” I’d sent Scott, Mike and Monica an email letting them know how I resolved the issue, but I was purposely a little vague because Monica was included in the email and I didn’t want to trash talk her or seem like I was blaming her. I’d told Scott the whole truth over the phone though and he didn’t show me that he cared much.

So I explained everything to him in full detail including what the client said about Monica and her team. I mean, I really went in depth.

When I finished Mike just stared at his desk for a second before giving me a disappointed look. “It’s unfortunate we almost lost a great customer like that.”

I nodded and then he pulled his phone out of his suit pocket and started typing. I waited a moment before starting to say, “Well, I’m gonna go,” but Mike interrupted me.

“How can we prevent something like that from happening again?”

“I think we need to be sure everyone is on board with the company expectations when it comes to clients. And clear consequences when those expectations aren’t met,” I said.

Mike nodded. “Yeah.” He started typing again.

A few hours after my talk with Mike, Scott called my cell phone.

“Hey Scott,” I answered.

“Hi Reese. How are things going there?” he asked.

“Fine. I’ve been helping one of the designers all afternoon. Coming up with ideas.”

“I’m disappointed you didn’t reach out to me and let me know that Mike was there and that he requested a meeting with you. I need to know about all your interactions with Mike. No matter how small.”

Honestly, I’d forgotten that Scott wanted to know anytime I talked to Mike like some sort of jealous husband.

“It completely slipped my mind,” I admitted.

“I noticed. And that’s unacceptable.”

But having a client complaint get all the way back to Mike is?

Needless to say, I was ready for the weekend. On Saturday, one of Brady’s friends was having people over before we all went on another friend’s boats. Even though I would never even stick my toe in Lake Michigan, I put on a bikini under a romper just in case.

I wasn’t prepared to see Tia because I was so focused on myself, but she was sitting on the couch when we arrived. She had on oversized aviators and a huge t-shirt and was kind of hunched over the table on her phone. I rolled my eyes, but wasn’t about to acknowledge her presence. Thief.

I’d invited Preston to the festivities because he appreciates a good boat and he arrived a little while later with a bottle of Don Julio. Brady left us alone to catch up and I immediately informed him that Tia was present. Obviously I’d told him all about her.

“Holy lips,” he gasped after taking a look at her. “She’s hot.”

I glared at him. “I hate her. I really just want to punch her in the face.”

“Reesie baby, no violence today. Let’s drink!” he said.

And that’s probably the most mature thing Preston has ever said so we did. We started talking to these two guys from Boston and I could tell Preston was really into them. Preston and his boyfriend, Joe, have been having issues because Joe cheated. Anyway, Preston loves straight guys especially if they have zero chance of being gay. More of a challenge for him I guess.

Suddenly Preston was a Republican, loved craft beer and planned on going back to school to further his education. All lies, but you know, you have to fit in somehow. Preston hit it off particularly well with the shorter of the two and kept giggling and touching the guy’s forearm. I’d kind of zoned out until I heard the guy say, “No, no, no. You gotta see this.” And the three of them started to walk away. Preston turned around and motioned for me to follow, but I decided to let him spend some quality time getting to know his new friend. So I waved him off then went to hang out with Brady.

To my surprise, Brady pulled me to him by my waist and kissed my forehead. He was drinking a beer with two guys and a girl who I’ve never met. The four of them were talking about work. One of the guys is a surgeon, but is an attending (?) and the girl is a resident OBGYN. They were using words like sutures, calcified and deoxyhemoglobin. Like what? Even though I had no idea what they were talking about, I love hearing Brady talk and be in his element like that. It’s so adorable.

Luckily they ran out of their beers and wanted to chug one last can before we left for the boat. At this point it had probably been close to an hour since I’d seen Preston and I checked my phone to see that he had texted me.

“This Tia bitch is actually pretty cool. I can’t wait to tell you about it!” he’d said. Why was he talking to Tia? Where was his loyalty?

A lot of the guests were migrating outside to get ready to walk to the dock where the boat was waiting. I hadn’t seen Preston go outside so I walked through the house to find him. He was in the living room where we’d first seen Tia, kneeling down in front of her and her friend. He must have felt my presence because he quickly jumped up and turned to me, motioning for me to leave.

“Don’t freak out yet. Give it a little time so it doesn’t look like I told you anything,” he said through clenched teeth.

I had to dig my phone all the way out of the bottom of my purse and saw that Preston had sent me a picture. A screenshot from Tia’s Instagram. Since I sent her that message, I think she blocked me or changed her Instagram name or something, but I haven’t really been too concerned about it. I didn’t think the skank would be stupid enough to post a picture wearing my bracelet.

But she did. At least I think it was my bracelet. In the picture she’s standing on the beach with a friend, her big fake tits on full display and wearing a stack of bracelets on one arm. There is a glare from the sun, but it definitely looked like my gold bracelet and I immediately saw red. There was no way Preston was stopping me from saying anything.

“So yeah, just wait a bit-” Preston started, but I was already on my way back to the living room to confront her. “Reese, wait!”

Tia and her little friend were still sitting on the couch where they’d been since we first arrived. They were the only ones still left inside.

“I’m nuts, huh?” I said.

Through her huge sunglasses I saw her roll her eyes.

“I may be nuts, but you’re a thief and a liar,” I continued.

“Girl, first of all, get out of my face,” she said.

“Give me my shit back, you klepto!” I said, my voice rising.

“I’m warning you right now, if you don’t get out of my face…”

A threat?

“Then what? Where’s my bracelet, Tiana? If I have to come get it I will, bitch. I know where you live.” I have no idea where the broad lives.

We started arguing and I was determined to win it. I was telling her that I had a serial number on my bracelet along with a miniature tracking device and the police knew where it was. She kept rolling her eyes and telling me to get out of her face which only pissed me off more. She never actually denied it.

“She stole my bracelet! Look! Show him the picture, Preston!” I exclaimed.

“What?” Brady said, even though he knew about my suspicions beforehand.

“I did not, Brady!” Tia said, standing up.

Preston and I both pulled out our phones, but I unlocked mine first.

“Look at the picture!” I yelled, shoving my phone in Brady’s face.

He barely even looked at it before shouting (Brady shouted!), “You stole my girlfriend’s bracelet?!”

“No! I wouldn’t do that! Brady!” Tia cried.

She was such a tough bitch when it was just me, but after Brady showed up she was suddenly whining and crying and playing the victim.

“Why would you do that after we invited you into our home?” he continued.

Tia put her hands up like she was going to grab Brady’s face, but thought better of it and just clasped them together in front of his face like she was begging. “I didn’t! I swear! I wouldn’t fucking do that! You know me.”

Tia’s friend said, “Don’t fucking yell at her!” And stepped in front of Tia to protect her as they walked around us toward the kitchen.

“She’s literally psychotic!” I yelled as they walked past.

I’ve never seen Brady yell at anyone besides me like that. I can literally count on one hand how many times I’ve seen him lose his cool in the time I’ve known him. Do y’all remember the time Brady screamed at me for messaging Jessica? It was like that. Face red, hands in fists and veins popping out everywhere. Scary. But at least he stuck up for me, even though he didn’t believe me at first.

So as you can imagine, we didn’t make it out onto the boat. Just think of what would happen if the two of us were on a boat together after that? One of us would have ended up at the bottom of Lake Michigan and it wasn’t going to be me.

On our way home, Brady apologized and told me he’d buy me a new bracelet. But I didn’t even want a new bracelet because that wasn’t the point.

That night, we went bar hopping. We made dinner, had a couple (four) drinks then walked a few blocks to the bars. We had a lot of fun dancing and making out and meeting new friends at the bar. I met a gorgeous Persian girl named Ava who promised to teach me how to slay my makeup like hers. She was so beautiful. I kept saying, “Isn’t she beautiful?” to Brady and I think it started to annoy him a bit. She’s only 22 and just graduated from college, but I want to be her when I grow up.

On Sunday, we didn’t wake up with hangovers so we went to church with Kendra and John and then had the hugest feast at brunch. I think Kendra and John were judging us a little bit because we literally had four huge platters sitting in front of us. I don’t care though. Food = ❤️.

I guess Brady felt really bad about the Tia thing because he bought me a pair of sunglasses I’ve been wanting. He’s so sweet. But I still want my bracelet back and I’m going to find a way to get it.

A couple more things. One: Dom has been in labor for three days. Brady is pissed because he said it’s super dangerous. She wants to have a natural birth and is refusing to take any drugs or have a C-section. Her water broke on Saturday and she’s been sitting is the hospital ever since. Brady and I talked about it and he literally screamed, “The baby could die! She’s such an idiot!” Yikes. Hopefully Brady’s mom or someone can talk some sense into her.

Speaking of Brady’s mom, she called my mom. My mom didn’t answer the first time so Brady’s mom left a voicemail saying something like, “I’d like to speak to you regarding your daughter wanting to marry my son.” Um, girlfriend, he wants to marry me too.

My mom called back and they spoke for about fifteen minutes. My freaking mom couldn’t remember the exact words, but said his mom asked her if she knew why we suddenly wanted to get married and how she felt about it. Of course my mom told her that she was excited and happy for us. And Brady’s mom said something like, “We don’t know if we approve of this yet. We hardly know Reese at all.” And whose fault is that?

So they scheduled a time for a longer conversation this week and I told my mom what she wasn’t allowed to say (that she sometimes gets high with her college friends, that she and my dad are separated, that I once locked my parents out of the house and threatened suicide because they wouldn’t let me sign up for the dorm I wanted, etc). Anyway, I’m anxious for that conversation.

Hola amigas. Brady and I didn’t end up going to Florida – we went to Mexico instead. The place we went was super touristy, but it’s beautiful and the tickets weren’t extremely expensive so we just went. Brady and I never said it out loud, but I think we were both trying to avoid accidentally encountering his mom in Florida. Can’t you imagine her “randomly” showing up because we were there?

So Brady left me in charge of finding somewhere to stay and of course, I completely forgot until the night before we left. I’m not sure how I managed to do that when the trip was last minute in the first place. It ended up working out fine though and we stayed in the cutest all inclusive ever. Brady didn’t even have to know I forgot.

On our way to Playa, Brady and I sat next to a woman who was probably in her late 30s. She was traveling with her husband, but their assigned seats weren’t together and no one was willing to switch. I know I wasn’t.

Brady was in the middle and I had the window seat and the woman was sitting on the other side of him. Despite being in her late 30s, she was wearing two pigtails which confused me a little bit. Brady and I were just talking and minding our own business and the lady leaned over to Brady and said, “Have you been here before?”

I detected a slight southern accent so I thought I liked her immediately. But she only wanted to talk to Brady. She took one glance at me and decided she wanted nothing to do with me. He started telling her about his travels and his job and she was super intrigued. She even turned around to the row behind us to tell her husband all about her new friend. Her husband was a doctor. And since Brady had worked during the day and we were traveling in the evening, she asked if he was tired. She was like, “You poor thing! You’re probably exhausted. Get some rest before we land. We won’t bother you!” Speak for yourself, lady.

They literally talked for the entire flight and I gave up trying to join the conversation after I realized she didn’t want me involved. I wasn’t even mad.

The lady was totally right that we were exhausted, but not too exhausted to drink. We found this late night buffet with margarita pitchers so we went there. A buffet! I’d go back to Mexico once a month just for the buffet. I’m kidding.

After we were drunk and full and happy, we headed back to the hotel. Naturally, we began fooling around. I was giving Brady the best blow job of his life when his phone vibrated and he had the fucking nerve to pick it up. And then read his message.

“What the fuck, Brady?” I exclaimed.

“What? Sorry. I wanted to make sure it wasn’t important,” he said.

“Why would it be important? I’m right here,” I said. I began to get up and grab my dignity.

I was livid. Who actually does that? I’m fairly sure I’ve never been so offended in my life. I refused to even touch him for the rest of the night.

The next morning, we got dressed in our bathing suits and headed down to the pool. To make up for the night before, I made Brady take a ton of pictures and videos of me to post online. Usually I’m not even that vain, but I figured since I always wished I had a personal photographer, this was my time to have one. And Brady kept saying, “That one was really good.” Probably so I would be satisfied and let him stop.

Later that day, we met a cute couple from Texas – Marianna and Ricardo. I loved them so much. She works in marketing/social media for a well known jewelry company, but also has a background in the beauty industry so we talked nonstop for about an hour. She asked me to be her personal stylist and I said yes. Isn’t that fun? I’d love to just tell people what to wear for a living, but if they ever disagreed with me, I’d quit. What I say goes. Ask Brady.

We were all staying at the same resort so we went to the restaurant/bar together that evening. It was almost like a double date with Kendra and John, but way more fun. No one was judging me. It’s cute, I have about forty pictures of the four of us saved on my camera roll. I don’t remember taking them, but they’re so funny to look back on. And I probably had a five minute long Snapchat story of all of us. Everyone kept chatting me with curious questions so they’re even popular with my friend group already.

Oh, do y’all remember my friend from college, Ronnie? He’s the one who is good friends with Devin and is always asking us to get back together. Like fuck you. So now I only talk to him on Snaphat and when he comments on my pictures on Instagram. Anyway, he was at an event on Saturday night and uploaded a ton of videos from it. I was just watching them innocently and then there was one of Devin standing there while Ronnie made fun of him. That’s what they do. They’ll video each other “roasting” the other. I don’t know. I watched it a couple (six) times and then I threw my phone. Luckily Brady rescued it for me and babysat me (and my phone) for the rest of the night.

So Mexico was fun especially for such a last minute trip. We got back on Sunday morning and even though we were pretty tired, our place was disgusting so we spent a few hours cleaning. I don’t mind cleaning, but I hate when Brady makes me. Or suggests that we clean together. Ugh. If I clean, I want it to be my own decision.

After everything was clean and all of our laundry was sorted, Brady went to the gym. I poured a glass of wine and FaceTimed my friend, Natalie. She was starting a new job on Monday and needed help calming her nerves. She’s so cute.

We sat on FaceTime drinking wine for about an hour and I helped her pick out an outfit (my second personal stylist client) and taught her how to introduce herself to people in a professional, non-bitchy way. Because I’m the perfect person to teach that.

After we hung up, Tucker came and found me and got in my lap. I’ve been meaning to find the perfect groomer to take him to for a haircut, but I just haven’t gotten the chance. And since its summertime and scorching hot in Chicago, I felt bad that he had to live under all that fur. So after three glasses of wine, I thought it would be a good idea to just trim his hair myself. I’d learned a little bit about hair cutting and coloring from Marianna so I thought I’d put my new knowledge to use. I grabbed a pair of scissors from the office along with his brush and began chopping.

First of all, let me just say Tucker wouldn’t sit still. And the scissors I was using weren’t sharp enough for his thick hair. So it didn’t turn out quite how I envisioned. And then, no one tells you this, but dogs have so many little crevices that grow hair. And he didn’t want me touching all those crevices. It was tough. Every time I thought I was getting close to be doing done, a new lock of hair would sprout up. Eventually, there was so much hair on the floor that I gave up because I needed to clean again before Brady came home and murdered me.

A little while later, Brady woke me up out of my sleep. It was freezing in the house because I’d turned the air down to 60 degrees to cool down from all the wine.

“Reese, what did you do?” he asked, holding Tucker in his arms.

When I fell asleep, Tucker looked at least partially presentable, but now he looked like a burn victim.

“Oh my gosh,” I said, reaching out to grab my baby.

Brady pulled him away. “Did you attempt to cut his hair?”

“Yes,” I sighed. “Now let me see him so I can fix it.”

“No. You aren’t allowed to do that again,” he said. And then he hid all the scissors in the house from me like I’m some sort of unstable psychopath.

We made Tucker an appointment to see a real groomer, but it isn’t until Friday. It’s embarrassing taking him for a walk with his fur all messed up like that. Learn from my mistake y’all, don’t try to groom your dog after three glasses of wine.

When I got back to work on Monday, Scott (who has been in New York working with Mike) had emailed everyone about a really bad complaint from a client about Monica. The client said she and her team were rude, didn’t get him what he asked for at all and quoted them completely inaccurate prices. It’s crazy because Monica’s sole job is to make sure all of our clients are satisfied. She’s supposed to be the one who deal with this kind of stuff. Mike was copied on the email which made Monica look so bad and I just waited to see what Mike would say. Mike is the kind of guy who would give a client $100,000 and a Range Rover to make them happy.

Monica called me just before lunch.

“That client is such a fucking dick,” she complained. “He’s so needy. He acts like he’s the only customer we have. Like, we don’t need your business that bad if you’re gonna make my life hell.”

I kind of get where she’s coming from, but you can’t have that kind of mindset and work in customer experience. You just can’t.

“I’ve done so much for this guy and he just isn’t satisfied. I’m pissed that he complained on me. He’s so annoying,” she went on.

I let her rant for a little bit while interjecting, “Yeah, I mean you did everything you could,” every so often.

Later on in the afternoon, right before we left for the day, Mike responded to the email, “Have Reese take over this account. Reese, please resolve the issue and let us know the outcome.”

He copied everyone and I can’t even lie, I liked that he specifically asked me to resolve the issue because he knew I could.

The next morning, Scott called Monica to see how everything in the office was going. I don’t know why, but it annoyed me. Why was he calling Monica, who couldn’t even keep her clients happy? Whatever. And he didn’t even reach out to me to see how my client resolution plan was going, but do you know who did? Mike. He emailed me asking if the irate client needed any accommodations or anything. And when I told him that I had everything under control he said, “I know you do. Thank you for all of your hard work, Reese.” And coming from Mike, that’s huge.

So I don’t hate Monica or anything, I just don’t think she’s very good at her job. But that isn’t really my issue until it’s my issue.

On Tuesday when I got to work, she stopped by my office to vent about the client some more. I tried to calm her down and asked a little bit about what he had been requesting and she just yelled about how needy and ridiculous he was. Then she stormed out and didn’t speak to me again for the rest of the day. I know I throw tantrums on the regular, but I would never throw a fit like that at work. I’m not exactly sure what I did wrong and why she has an issue with me? Not that I care, but it created a hostile work environment all day. She was talking to everyone except me and would literally wipe the smile off her face whenever I came around.

Scott isn’t back until next week. I think she’s mad that she looked bad in front of Mike and he asked me to fix it. How incredibly immature is it to be mad at me for that though?

So Anna told Lindsey that I was rude to her and Lindsey told Brady. I know I wasn’t super nice or anything, but I don’t think I was rude and especially not rude enough for her to go telling people. So it really bothered me.

“Wait, do you think I was rude?” I asked Brady when he told me.

He shrugged, but then nodded.

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Why didn’t you say anything then if you thought I was rude? Or are you just saying that because she did?”

“I didn’t think about it. She doesn’t know you very well, like I do,” Brady said.

“So what? I was not rude to her,” I said and then I thought of something else. “What’s the deal with y’all anyway? Are you still into it?”

“Into what?” Brady wanted to know.

“Her!!”

He gave me a weird look. “No! What? Why would you ask that?”

“Because y’all were all over each other – she kissed you!”

“She did not kiss me!”

“And you wouldn’t stop talking at her and looking at her. In fact, I think you were rude,” I said.

Brady laughed. He’s so annoying. And honestly, I think Anna is annoying too for complaining about me. Like grow up.

Brady’s mom has emailed me a couple of times. One of them was the worksheets she promised which she sent to both me and Brady. The other one was another article in which she prefaced, “A must read.” Obviously I didn’t read it, but it was something about millennials and our generation. Not interested. She hasn’t called my mom either. I’ve been texting my mom every hour asking because I’m nervous about it.

I asked Brady if his mom gave Anna such a hard time. Brady didn’t look up and said, “She gives everyone a hard time.”

Which isn’t true because I asked Lindsey and she doesn’t have any issues with Brady’s mom. In fact, she loves her. She called her “nice” and “sweet.” We can’t have been talking about the same person.

I got in an argument with Carly’s brother, Kyle, last week. He’s such a dick. I left an expensive bracelet at his apartment last year – SO LONG AGO – and I never got around to going to get it. He sent me a picture of it and said, “You want this?”

And I said, “Oh my gosh, yes please! I kind of forgot about it.”

“My girlfriend almost got a new gift lol, what’s it worth to you?” he said.

I sent the eye rolling emoji back.

“I’m kidding. Do you want to swing by and pick it up?”

“Can you just mail it to me? I don’t have time to come to your place and I definitely have no business being there.”

“And I don’t have time to mail it to you.”

“Okay give it to your little 21 year old girlfriend then, you prick,” I said.

“She’s 22. Are you jealous? :-)”

And so I had to go on this tirade about how I’m not jealous and had no reason to be jealous because I have a hot boyfriend who loves me. Kyle said, “Whatever. Do you want this or not?”

And I said, “Keep it and give it to your girlfriend. I’m sure it’ll be the only gift she ever gets from you anyway.”

He didn’t respond.

So when I saw Carly on Friday, I said, “Your brother is such a dick.”

And she said, “You weren’t saying that when you were fucking him though.”

I didn’t know what to say. Carly has changed so much. She used to be the sweetest, happiest girl who was afraid to piss people off. I’m kind of proud of her actually, as long as she doesn’t get too crazy with me.

On Friday evening, I had dinner and drinks with Carly before she headed to the suburbs to visit her family. Chris wasn’t arriving until Saturday morning so girls night it was.

“You and Brady are so on and off. You’ll get engaged and then he will piss you off and you’ll call the wedding off,” Carly said.

“That’s rude,” I said.

“It’s true. I feel like you complain about him more than you praise him.” Carly rolled her eyes. “I’d love for you two to work out though.”

“It sounds like you have faith in us,” I replied.

“I just don’t know. Don’t get engaged just because I am.”

I laughed. “This has absolutely nothing to do with you!”

She was busy admiring her ring and looking at her phone and didn’t say anything.

“How is planning going?” I asked.

Carly locked her phone. “Good. It’s coming together. Have you found any shoes yet?”

And that started us into talking about her wedding, Chris, their place in Philly and took us back to me and Brady. I told her that we were kind of looking for a new place and she said, “Look in the suburbs. More bang for your buck.”

I scoffed. “No! Are you crazy? We are not suburban people.”

“I bet Brady would consider it. I’ll ask him when I see him.”

She was being so annoying. I was actually really glad when it was time for her to leave. When I got home, Lindsey was over again. Brady was in the kitchen making food and I went in and greeted him.

“Carly was being such a bitch,” I said after we hugged.

“What did she do?” Brady asked.

“Just saying that I want to get engaged because she’s engaged and other stuff. She thinks we should move to the suburbs and I had to explain to her that we aren’t suburban people. Right?”

He shrugged. “I’d be open to looking.”

“What the hell!” I exclaimed, swatting him and someone buzzed the buzzer. “I’ll get it.”

Lindsey beat me to buzzing them in, but I met whoever it was at the door when they rang the bell. I wasn’t sure who we were expecting, but I personally was not expecting Tia. She was with Brady’s friend, Ben, but she was standing right in the doorway, waiting to get in.

“Hey girl,” she greeted me.

“Hi,” I said back. I remembered Anna calling me rude and didn’t want anyone else to call me rude and have Brady questioning if he wanted to marry someone like that. So I added, “How are you?”

“Good. Brady is expecting us,” she said.

I opened the door wider to let them in. And then, Lindsey and Tia proceeded to be butt buddies all night. They were all over each other and I can’t even lie, I felt a little bit left out. Especially because Brady was hanging out with his guy friend so I was just sitting there fifth wheeling. Eventually I got bored and got in bed with a book.

A little while later, Brady came and found me and got on top of me.

“Why did you leave?” he whined. He smelled like alcohol.

“Because you’re with your friends and I have reading to catch up on,” I said, holding up the iPad.

“Reading my messages?” Brady smirked.

Very funny. He didn’t give me the chance to answer because he lifted up my shirt and started kissing my tummy. “Come back out,” he said. “I’m bored without you.”

So I went back out there and listened to them be loud and drunk and talk for a while until they all finally went home. At one point, Tia went to the bathroom and was gone for a little while, but I didn’t think anything of it. I figured the broad was probably sick from drinking, but as long as she cleaned up after herself, I wasn’t worried about it.

On Saturday, Brady and I woke up and went to the gym then got ready for lunch with Carly and Chris. I was not in any rush to see Carly again.

As soon as we sat down, Carly dug in her purse and slid the bracelet I left at Kyle’s to me.

“From Kyle,” she told me.

Seriously, Carly? I snatched it and put it in my bag then dared a peek at Brady. He was squinting at me through his glasses and quickly looked away when he saw me looking. I’d explain later.

Even with everything that happened, I was happy to see Carly and Chris being super affectionate and cute during lunch. Apparently she doesn’t think my relationship is going to make it, but I wouldn’t wish that on her.

That night, we went bar hopping like old times. I wore an off the shoulder top, One Teaspoon shorts and heels and looked way too cute for the bars we went to. And definitely way too cute for Taco Bell which we went to afterwards. It’s all I crave when I’m drunk though. We all went back to our place because Carly and Chris were crashing with us. Brady and I went to our room and I immediately jumped on my man.

The next morning, we met up with Kendra and John for brunch. Naturally, I got a little too crazy with the mimosas and dominated the entire conversation. I was being really annoying, but no one stopped me. Kendra, Carly and their men were doing something afterwards, but Brady decided to take me home.

Later on, we were getting ready to go to dinner and I realized that I couldn’t find my Cartier love bracelet Brady got me. I’ve lost it before, but I knew exactly where I left it, on the bathroom counter on my jewelry tray. I saw it on Friday evening before Brady’s friends came over. And you know who used the bathroom?

At first, I wasn’t going to confront Brady about it, but I couldn’t even stop myself.

“No, the one you got me. Kyle didn’t get me a bracelet! What the hell?” I said.

“What was that Carly gave you?” he asked.

“I left it at Kyle’s a long time ago and he just found it,” I explained.

Brady looked up at me, rolled his eyes, and looked back down.

“Anyway, I hate her. She’s not welcome back here and I want my fucking shit back,” I said.

“You don’t know that anyone stole it. You probably lost it,” he scoffed.

I glared at him. I let it go then, but that’s a pretty expensive bracelet. So I messaged her yesterday.

Brady and I went to dinner and talked about his parents a lot. His mom has been emailing him daily. I don’t remember her ever caring about him that much so it annoyed me. We are going to Florida next weekend and she was asking questions about when we are arriving and leaving. If this broad ruins our trip to Florida, I’m going to kill her. I’ve been sending him pictures of rings too. I have a whole file on my laptop. With how crazy his mom is being lately, we might get married sooner than we thought! Who knows! I want to be prepared.

So yeah, I found Tia through Lindsey’s Instagram. And I messaged her. I said, “I know you stole my bracelet. It was shitty. I’m expecting it back with an apology note and don’t think you’re ever allowed back at our place again.”

She replied, “You’re nuts.”

And then she told Brady because of course. Brady and I were sitting on the patio, eating and drinking, and his phone vibrated. Brady read the message then looked up at me, slowly.

“Reese, you messaged Tia?” he said, sounding pissed.

“Yes, I did! That bitch stole my bracelet and you weren’t going to do anything about it!” I said.

“I cannot believe you,” he mumbled.

“I hate her,” I said.

Brady was pissed at me for a little while, but he got over it because he knows I had no choice, but do that. And now, I won’t have to see Tia and her stupid big lips and tits and piercings again.

I have more Scott cheating drama. He was on vacation for about a week, but emailed me constantly with things he needed done. One day he emailed me with the code to his office and asked me to get a bag from there that a friend would be picking up. I did as I was told and waited for the friend. And do you know who his friend was? A lanky brunette in a tight pencil skirt and silky tank top! She was hot. Obviously I introduced myself and demanded to know who she was.

“I’m Megan! So nice to meet you!” she said.

“So how do you know Scott?” I asked.

“We’re good friends. Thank you for my stuff!”

So when Scott got back, I was all, “So Megan was nice.”

He didn’t make eye contact and just said, “Yes, she is. Did you make any progress with the North Carolina client?”

Evading questions and eye contact? Definitely his mistress.

Let’s see, what else? I’ve been browsing dogs online. I know it’s the last thing we need right now, but I’m addicted. I just want another one – a big one! Brady’s not on board yet, but he will just need some convincing.