Witterings

Besides the trivial meanderings of bloggerings herein and thereabouts, I have written screenplays (In Hollywood, Playing Willy) and am putting the finishing touches to my first novel, The Sublime Dramatic; a tale of science fiction, comedy and global conspiracies. News of that will be forthcoming, so please follow me on Twitter/Facebook for more information.

Within the pages here lies a treasure trove of total bollocks. Why treasure trove? Because bollocks are testicles, which are colloquially known as family jewels - so treasure. A trove? Well, as you can see from this intro - the trove is as drivelling as it is replete!

Not many things make me angry. I’m lucky enough to be pretty laid back when it comes to life. I bend in the breeze of bedlam and laugh when life gets lousy. Of course, I’m far from the mill pond of eternal meditation and tranquility and there are silly things that wind me up to the point of despair, like my mother’s royal icing and gold picture frames. Things that I realise that are non-sensical and really should never have been the basis of a few major arguments in my life. But all in all, I’d say that I am a peaceful soul with very little in my life that I have seen that would make me think that this world isn’t a beautiful place to be. Well, perhaps something.

There is one major thing that really gets my goat (a strange idiom that I’ve never quite understood as, if I ever did have a goat and someone got it for me, I’d be quite pleased that they’d made the effort to return my little Billy - annoyance would barely be factored in my small farmyard reunion).

One of the most offensive and ignorant aspects of modern society was underlined in a news story I read today about an iPhone app. A strange subject to cause me consternation indeed, but one that I hope anyone that reads this will agree is totally out of place in today’s world.

The story focussed on Apple’s apparent lack of judgement when it allowed a piece of software to be purchased from the App Store that alleged to gives users “freedom from homosexuality through the power of Jesus”. The full story can be read here.

My first reaction was - that has to be a joke. We are in 2011 - that has to be a (slightly premature) April Fool’s jape? Alas, no - it’s all too real.

Putting aside Apple’s utter idiocy in even contemplating that this app should make it through the first stages of its approval process, I was taken aback by how moronic the “pro-Christian” group who created it sounded. Recalling news footage of equally mentally-challenged folk who picketed funerals of gay soldiers, confounded my chagrin of humankind into more of a fearful indignation.

Taking their stance of being able to provide a “gay cure” and laying it in front of you - it doesn’t take much of a leap to see that it rings bells with other bigotry in the history of our not so peaceful planet. How fast would Apple have pulled the app if it stated to be a Jew cure? A black cure? A Muslim cure? Of course, the creators of this software probably would like to release all of those apps as well, as is their mentality. Small minded, petty fools who believe that there is nothing in this world worth living for apart from their misguided indoctrination into hate of everything and anything that doesn’t exist in (their understanding of) a book that calms their nerves when they think of their own mortality. A book that was rewritten many times through the ages and, no doubt, has the creative input of a few closet homosexuals added into the mix of gospels they so revere today.

I’m not going to ramble on about this, as hopefully most of the people who have made it this far have the intelligence to be equally as appalled as I am and are adding their names to the petition to kick Apple up the arse.

I’m not gay, black, Muslim, Jewish or even pro-Christian but, as no god is my witness, wouldn’t Earth be a far bleaker place without the more fulfilled people who live on this rock that are genuinely happy to say “I may not be, but I’m blessed to stand alongside those that are.”

If you need to invest in an iPhone app that goes one step to curing crimes against nature - I would suggest you start with Angry Bigots. There’s nothing more satisfying than catapulting them full force into pigs in glass houses.