segunda-feira, agosto 10, 2015

Undignified moments of baby delivery

So... you've waited 40 weeks and the moment to deliver your baby is here. Everyone is psyched (yourself included) and all those happy and horror stories of other women's births are going through your mind until the first contraction hits and you know it is show time!

For all it's beauty and magic, labour is also filled with undignified moments nobody can really prepare you to... for example:

- Jack Nicholson moments: you will be walking around in a stupid hospital gown that is supposed to close on the back, but in-spite of your nakedness it remains open because the last thing you remember is to close up the stupid dress

- Can't touch this moments: almost everyone that enters the delivery room will have to touch you in some way you don't want them to

- Poltergeist moments: you may scream and switch languages as if you were possessed by the multi language demon

- Waterfalls moments: you realize you have to pee, but there's no way the midwife will let you go to the bathroom

- Did they forget to take the second baby out moments: when you get up the next day and realize you still look like you are 7 months pregnant (Kate Middleton must be a real princess to come out f the hospital looking like she did)

There were other embarrassing moments... many others... but fortunately - thanks to all he hormones you are pumped with - your brain forgets. That is definitely the best part... forgetfulness (which by the way will accompany you for all the weeks following the delivery).