Cremate The Blackburn Dead In Batches For Live Earth

COUNCIL bosses in Blackburn have decided to cremate bodies three at a time in a cost-cutting exercise that, not surprisingly, has shocked grieving relatives.

The Darwen Borough Council in Lancashire plans to store bodies for up to 24 hours after a funeral before cremating them in batches of three in order save money on staff overtime. And while the Council is following national guidelines, the radical plans have met with strong local opposition.

Tory MP, Nigel Evans, says: “If people aren’t cremated after the service it is quite undignified. They should have respect and diligence for the dead. If they don’t have enough furnaces they should invest in them. People pay enough for funerals these days. Leaving bodies hanging around is not dignified. There are ways to do these things. We can save money on all sorts of things – but not on the dead.”

However, service manager of the council-run Pleasington Crematorium, where the batch burning will take place, is adamant that he is doing the right thing. Says he: “The effect of this practice will be to improve our efficiency in terms of saving fuel costs, reducing our environmental impact and cutting down on staff overtime.

“Consultations have taken place with representatives of the Church of England, Roman Catholic, nonconformist, Hindu and Sikh faiths and also with non-religious representatives. No objections have been raised.”

Consent forms will, however, have to be signed by the grieving families. Which is just what you want to be asked when you’ve just said goodbye to a loved one – “Can we leave their body here overnight and burn them with another couple of stiffs tomorrow instead?