ROSS: What? Wh- hello? The Millners' farm in Connecticut? The Millners, they had this unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and rabbits that he could chase and it was- it w- .....Oh my God, Chi Chi!

(INTRO)

SCENE 1: CHANDLER AND JOEY'S APARTMENT. (JOEY IS REHEARSING A PART; CHANDLER READS THE OTHER PART FROM A SCRIPT)

CHANDLER: "So how does it feel knowing you're about to die?"

JOEY: "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have to live with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die."

CHANDLER: Hey, that was really good!

JOEY: Thanks! Let's keep going.

CHANDLER: Okay. "So. Whaddya want from me, Damone, huh?"

JOEY: "I just wanna go back to my cell. 'Cause in my cell, I can smoke."

CHANDLER: "Smoke away."

(JOEY TAKES OUT A PACKET OF CIGARETTES AND A LIGHTER. HE FUMBLES AND DROPS THE LIGHTER. THEN HE LIGHTS A CIGARETTE, TAKES A DRAG AND COUGHS)

CHANDLER: I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell alone.

JOEY: What?

CHANDLER: Relax your hand!

(JOEY LETS HIS WRIST GO LIMP)

CHANDLER: Not so much!

JOEY: Whoah!

CHANDLER: Hey!

JOEY: Hey!

CHANDLER: Alright, now try taking a puff.

(JOEY TRIES AND VISIBLY WINCES)

CHANDLER: Alright. . okay. No. Give it to me.

JOEY: No no no, I am not giving you a cigarette.

CHANDLER: It's fine, it's fine. Look, do you wanna get this part, or not? Here.

(JOEY RELUCTANTLY GIVES HIM THE CIGARETTE)

CHANDLER: Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's been missing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete.

JOEY: Y'miss it?

CHANDLER: Nah, not so much. Alright, now we smoke. (TAKES A PUFF) Oh. . my. . God. (CONTINUES TO SMOKE)

SCENE 2: CENTRAL PERK(ALL PRESENT EXCEPT RACHEL AND PHOEBE)

MONICA: No, no, no. They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of a guy's thumb to the tip of his index finger.