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by Vinny DiGirolamo, Author & Publisher Gone Rogue

Never try to take a loaded gun from someone pointing it at you, especially if Red Redington is holding the gun.

Only tell Lizzie enough to make her look good to the FBI, but always have her deliver your enemy to Red.

If Red doesn’t kill you the first time he puts a bullet in you, pretend that you’re dead, or else say goodbye.

If there’s anything you can’t explain, blame Tom.

When Red says it’s bad, believe it’s really bad… or is it?

If Red is pointing a gun at you, it’s probably the last thing you’ll remember before you depart this earth life.

The question I have is, if Aram can’t figure out the Fulcrum’s 1980s technology, how does he figure out the most impossible technological tasks during the episode?

No matter how many times Red dies in the show he will always come back for more.

Red may suffer from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), because every time he talks to the most dangerous criminals in the world, he tells them what he ate for breakfast. Then he shoots them. That’s what we love about him.

How come we’re the only ones that appreciate Red’s humor and charm? The FBI doesn’t appear to hold the same value.

I think I want to be Red for Halloween this year. Do you think someone will make a mask?

Any bad guy you noticed in the episode that’s not a main character, will probably be eliminated by the end of the show. Now that’s something to look forward to as an extra.

I love the way that Red kills people; ruthlessly, intentionally, premeditated, even his best friends get the plastic bag suffocation treatment and they know it’s coming. I’m not sure if I prefer a bullet to the head over the plastic bag routine though. What’s your preference?

Who are you kidding Red, every new case you bring Lizzie is another opportunity for a daddy daughter date.

Every time Lizzie sees Red execute some deserving bad guy in cold blood, she’s more excepting of Red. But who’s judging?

Tom and Lizzie must’ve had great sex, otherwise why haven’t they killed each other? Some marriages are like that you know.

At least Tom pretended to be married to Lizzie, Hollywood usually skips that step. That makes it all right then.

Okay… I’m coming out of the closet, my wife and I watch Blacklist from different rooms so we can text each other what we think is going on.

The series finale nine years from now will either have Red taking a bullet to his head because he’s not Superman or they will reveal that he works for this super-secret black program after all and was sent to go underground in the underworld all along.

Alan Alda (Ezra) wanted to tell us more about the story line, but because the ratings were too high, they blew him up in living color. Lesson learned: Don’t mess with ratings.

If you really want to draw the audience in, throw in a little girl crisis, ready to be blown up, shot, or run over chasing a puppy. If you really want to capture the hearts of the audience throw in a panicking mother Red has to save or deliver the girl to. Happens every time. Makes you feel good about Red – true or not true?

Have you ever asked yourself after one hour of watching blood, gore, corruption, and merciless killing, why you feel so good?

I feel safer knowing that Red is running the FBI, CIA, the DIA, and every other criminal and politician in the world. Do you think he has anything to do with Obama’s reelection?

What does the Blacklist and the movie, Kingsmen, have in common? Everyone seems to lose their head.

I wonder if Red qualified as a sharpshooter while at the Naval Academy. I don’t think he’s missed one shot in all the episodes so far.

If Red were your daddy, can you think of a few people that you’d like to introduce him to?

Who is going to design the first game of Trivial Pursuit for the Blacklist? They certainly give you plenty of material to work with.

So whose idea was it to stuff the bunny rabbit with the world’s most notorious criminals and corrupt government officials list? I figured out the bunny had it last Season. Didn’t you?

Did you notice how quickly Lizzie tore into the bunny when she figured it out? Red knew she’d be a good understudy. I’d watch her more closely around your kid’s stuffed animals now.

If Hollywood wants to bring back a character to the storyline, it can always happen in a dream, involve a random flashback, or be a memory that may or may not have anything to do with the plot line. People just want to feel good about their favorite bad guys who were waxed in previous episodes; to know that they’re okay. The Walking Dead employs these tactics too.

What do the Walking Dead and the Blacklist have in common? If you shoot them in the head they don’t get back up.

The Blacklist could double its revenue if it had a follow on commentary segment to help people sort through all the issues they’re dealing with in their lives while identifying with Red. The Walking Dead has the Talking Dead immediately following the episode. How fun would that be? It would prolong our Blacklist experience. I’d call it “The Blacklist Phenomenon.”

Okay, be truthful. We all want to know if Tom and Lizzie get hooked up again and do the 50 shades of gray thing. Now wouldn’t that be an episode not to miss?

What would happen if Red found religion? There wouldn’t be a show. Just saying.

Wouldn’t you like to know what Red remembers about the fire? He certainly wasn’t four years old.

Tom made the best car commercials. But the last thing I can imagine him driving is a Volvo like Edward Cullen. I’d like to see him in a Lamborghini instead.

How did Tom survive the gunshot wound to his abdomen anyways? Oh yeah. He’s the guy we love to hate and every suspense series has to have one of those guys in the show.

No wonder Russia lost the Cold War. We had Red.

One thing I like about Red. He never does it for the money or the glory. He just does it for the power, underworld notoriety, or the opportunity to tell someone he told them so or what he had for breakfast. You can bank on it.

Did you notice that Lizzie becomes less and less emotionally torn with the outcome with each episode? In fact when Red talks about what he had for breakfast, she now knows he’s trying to divert the conversation. More and more, she stays focused on her line of questioning.

How many cell phones do they destroy in every episode? I call that technological cruelty to devices.

How come Red doesn’t use a smart phone or social media? Imagine his Twitter tag? #imcomingforyou, #whatIhadforbreakfasttoday, or perhaps, #whosyourdaddy?

What does the Blacklist and Star Trek have in common? He magically appears at the right time, in the right place, with the right back up, just in time to save Lizzie or kill the bad guy. But this much we know, his phasers are never set to stun. Beam me up Scotty.

Red makes the Klingons look like little puppy dogs.

William Shatner should appear in one of James Spader’s episodes of the Blacklist; perhaps as a replacement character for blown up, Alan Alder. With a little déjà vu and creative writing, Blacklist writers could create a new demand for Boston Legal. And you thought I was going to make another Star Trek analogy…

Why am I up at 4 AM recording these observations about the Blacklist with 102 fever and the shakes? It must have been the bowl of vichyssoise I ate late last night watching reruns of the Blacklist. I like my soup thick with pureed leeks, onions, potatoes, cream and chicken stock. How do you like it; warm or cold?

We can sleep easier knowing that our tax dollars are being spent wisely with Redington on the job.

Red for President. Now that’d be something, wouldn’t it?

Did you know that Raymond Redington and Jimmy Carter reportedly went to the same college; the United States Naval Academy. They definitely took away much different lessons on diplomacy from their leadership classes. Don’t you think?

Redington talks a good game when it comes to his sex life, but he’s well beyond his years to show us too much information. Oh, and while he was killing notorious underworld mobsters he was faithful to his wife. He obviously has issues, but don’t tell him I said that.

Everyone is expendable except Lizzy and Red, just like Darrel and Rick are on the Walking Dead, and Captain Kirk and Spock are on Star Trek. So who’s going to be eliminated next? Not them. If they do, we’ll just have to retrieve them from an alternate reality or do a series of flashbacks.

Like Spock they can always find a way to bring back main characters to life. Tom and Red… But the guy on the tanker ship Tom killed. Not a chance.

When will Blacklist the movie be released? I’d like to see Liam Neeson in that one. Red had better not have Taken anything from him or else it could get really messy.

What does the Blacklist and Disney have in common? I can’t think of anything right now.

At least we know Red has principles when it comes to killing someone. They all appear to know its coming and they seem to be okay with it. I imagine in the next life they think they’ll have bragging rights. “I got eliminated by Raymond Redington.”

Never say to Redington, “I guess you don’t know how powerful I really am,” or “You work for me,” especially when he has a gun pointing at you and has broken into your home with a dead guy hanging on your wall.

Never tell Redington what you had for breakfast. It could be your last meal.

How does Red inspire loyalty? Well, if you believe his intentions are basically good or he saved you as a youth from being victimized or terrorized in a third world country. You see. He has a good heart after all.

Why did Hollywood change the season airing from Sunday evenings to Thursdays? I guess it didn’t quite mix very well with everyone’s Sunday sermons. By Thursday we’re all ready for some down and dirty Kick A** and to slay a few bad guys. Come on, you know that’s true.

What does the Blacklist have in common with Sister Wives? From a man’s perspective; one can only wish. From a woman’s perspective; safety in numbers? Bad joke?

I bet you Fedora sales are up. My wife has one and wears to the grocery store. When she greets me at the door with the hat and trench coat on, I wonder what she has in mind.

Did you notice Red never repeats a line? I wish my wife would take up that habit. I’m in trouble for saying that now. I don’t repeat lines either.

Seeing Red chained up or being tortured is insulting. But he never forgets what he had for breakfast.

Did you ever notice that Red always has a better case to solve than the one the FBI is working on? I think there’s a subliminal message there.

I think one of the reasons the show is so much fun is that you never know who is working for who.

If I had a T-shirt that had any saying from the Blacklist, what would your favorite saying or anecdote be? Red for life

Imagine Redington on America’s Got Talent? All he’d have to do is stare at the judges with his mischievous smile and they would vote him to the next round. In fact, Simon would probably be careful what he says for the first time in his life.

How about if Redington was the next Bachelor candidate? I think the ruse, I mean the rose, would mean something very different.

What do the Pirates of the Caribbean and Blacklist have in common? Hollywood built the show around the main actor.

Does Red know how to drive a car or has his license suspended by the FBI?

Are you Team Redington or Team FBI?

What does Bella on Twilight have in common with Red on the Blacklist? You can’t read their minds.

I don’t know about you but when I think of 50 shades of gray I think of Redington, not Sadomasochist sex. There’s this moral conflict that comes up every time he pulls the trigger.

Things you will never see on the Blacklist. The FBI bailing out Red intentionally. The FBI thanking Red for his help turning over people worst on the 10 most wanted. Red dying in the series season finale nine years from now.

I think they should remake the Godfather with James Spader. I’d go see it. Would you?

“Try the cream bur lea. It’s exquisite.” Be sure to say that with Redington flare. You know what I’m talking about.

My favorite Redington line. “Now Margaret, please stop your yelling or I’ll have to shoot into the closet and I’m not sure what I’ll hit.” I’m glad she quieted down. But then he took a rain check on eating her roast. “I’m sure your roast is delicious, but I’ll have to take a rain check.” (paraphrased).

What a great show to portray any social issue and how we’d love to handle them in the Redington way.

What does Redington and Santa Claus have in common? He delivers on promises, he’s pleasantly plump, and always knows what you want to see.

Never say, “Why am I here,” to Redington when he is planning the next move.

Have you noticed how Red is always telling Lizzie that she’s asking the wrong question? We should try that on our kids some time when they ask, “Why.”

Which would you prefer to watch, the Super Bowl or the Blacklist? I thought so. Me too.

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