Saturday, April 11, 2009

Twelve

Dear Olivia,

Last night, when you went to sleep, you were eleven. This morning, when you woke up, an anniversary was marked. A moment in time where the earth stopped, twelve years ago, and the whole world changed. We will never be the same. I remember the moment I became somebody's sister, your sister, and the doctor held you up in the air, your gooey, slimy, pink, little self, and announced your arrival to the world. And suddenly, our 47 year old mother had just performed a miracle, and I became a sister, and Daddy held his own little, pink, baby, and you totally captured our hearts. I don't remember all of the specific dates of the milestones of your infancy. I do remember that the sibling I had always hoped for changed everything.You cried at night, and slept during the day, and ate the weirdest stuff. You liked to eat butter, straight up, spoonfuls at a time. You were absolutely obsessed with little orphan Annie. Maybe you could explain to me why you needed to watch that movie 42 times a day? You sang Britney Spears songs on the coffee table. You snuck into my room while I was at school and poured nail polish all over my carpet. You went through a phase where you labeled everything in marker, like my "chrash can," in Sharpie, for instance. Thanks for that, by the way. You loved pooh. And pooing. You owe me at least 3493 dirty diaper changes on your future neices and nephews, just so you know. During your Mulan phase, you put your beautiful hair in a pony tail on the top of your head and cut it off (maybe you were trying to be a samurai or something?). You wore princess dresses for bed, and around the house, and to the grocery store and the park and Home Depot.Then, somewhere along the line, my little, baby, sister suddenly became a person. A walking, talking, person, with gifts and ideas and the best sense of humor i've ever seen. You started making movies that have captivated everyone I know. On more than one occasion, someone has come up to me and told me that they watch your movies when they are having a bad day and it makes their day much better. I agree, you could make any bad day good. Youre a little spitfire now, who is quick on her feet and able to take on any one. You are resilient and capable and determined and brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.You are beautiful, even during your "awkward phase,"and dang girl, you can shake it. You can hold your own in a conversation with people who are in college, and sometimes I think my friends would rather hang out with you than me. I don't blame them. You are way funnier than I could ever be. You are eager to learn about God's love and quick to express it. And you are so, so, loved. Being in middle school is hard, really hard, and you are continuing to approach it with grace and charisma. I am so proud of who you are. And who you will become. Your attitude towards life is contagious. Hold onto your child-like faith as you continue to take on the world. Seek God. Ask Questions. Be yourself.My little air-fry, le cremeee, liver, boo, olive, peanut, cheeseburger, sibling, you are an absolute dream come true.Happy twelfth birthday.I love you.

I had my heart transformed at the age of 17 by a God who stopped at nothing to make His love for me known. I am broken and imperfect, but because of His love I am whole. I am learning how to be a human being, though often times I feel like an alien. Fortunately, God has given me a loving, patient husband who understands what its like to have one foot in heaven and the other on earth. We make a dynamic duo, if I do say so myself, and I couldn't be more excited to see our life unfold. In the mean time, I am learning how to trust, to love authentically, and to be where I am...wherever that is.