The Turtle/Fox Team-Up.

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August 4, 2014

It’s been interesting seeing how upset some people are about this new version of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, with a lot of the cries “They’re ruining it!” from those angered about changes to the material. To me, it’s strange to try to be a TMNT purist, since this has been a franchise that has been changed over and over and over again. Really, unless you were a fan of the original, 1984, black and white comic book, it’s difficult to make any claim to being a fan of the “real” Ninja Turtles – after all, the late 1980s animated series (and accompanying toyline) that made TMNT a true cultural phenomenon was itself drastically altering the depiction and tone of the characters.

All of which is to say, it’s best to go into the new Ninja Turtles film accepting it won't exactly match your ideal of TMNT; that ideal usually being whichever version first introduced you to the characters in your respective childhood. There have been many versions of TMNT before and there will be many after. This is just the 2014 model.

The basics of the story essentially remain the same as in many incarnations. New York is under siege by criminals called the Foot Clan, under the command of a leader called the Shredder. Young, intrepid reporter April O’Neil (Megan Fox) stumbles upon the Foot being thwarted by mysterious vigilantes and soon discovers these vigilantes are teenagers… and mutants… and ninjas …and turtles!

The new TMNT comes from Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes, with a script by Josh Appelbaum & André Nemec (Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol) and Evan Daugherty (Snow White and the Huntsman) and directed by Jonathan Liebesman (Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, Wrath of the Titans). And yes, this team have made some notable tweaks to the material, starting with the Foot, who are no longer ninjas (or robots, depending on which version you hold true!), but rather more of a paramilitary force.

Then of course are the physical differences to the Turtles themselves, who are far larger and more physically imposing than we’ve ever seen them before. This feels like a miscalculation, as it really does take away from the whole ninja aspect of the characters - as much as I'm not against changes in general, "Ninja" is literally right there in the title after all. While we see Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello and Raphael show off their martial arts skills, a lot of the time it seems they defeat their enemies by simply being freaking strong as hell; punching them across rooms and even toppling vehicles at them.

Also, this film falls into the same trap a ton of superhero movies have before -- really going back to 1989’s Batman -- which is feeling it’s necessary to tie all the characters’ history together in major ways. April, her late father and her father’s boss, Eric Sachs (William Fichtner) are all notably connected into the history of the Turtles and their master Splinter in a manner that feels unnecessary – and also means there’s some huge coincidence involved in her coming into contact with all of these folks during the events of the film.

The film has its merits though. While their designs are a bit wonky, one thing the film does a very good job portraying is the actual interplay between the four Turtles. After a bit of a languid opening, the film gains a lot more humor and charm when the title characters come out of the shadows and begin to get more camera time, joking and bantering together. The groan-worthy inclusion of a fart aside (yeah, yeah, I know – kids love farts), a fun early sequence -- showing the Turtles hurtling, sliding and skating through the city and sewers -- does a good job of stressing these characters are teenagers, as does a very amusing moment in an elevator late in the film. The core traits of the characters are retained, and there are some appreciated nods to the history of TMNT across various media, including funny asides to some less than proud moments.

Michelangelo is probably the character that comes off best here, given an endearingly laid back demeanor (but not complete surfer dude persona, as in other depictions), along with a notable crush on April that is often used in humorous ways. The film could have dialed back on Donatello's "nerd" persona a bit, which includes taped up glasses, but otherwise, he, the ever-angry Raphael and the natural leader Leonardo are about what you'd expect. It should also be noted that the CGI Turtles and Splinter mostly look pretty good as far as the FX go, except for a few action moments where seeing them move more quickly sometimes leads to them feeling a bit more cartoony.

While the Turtles get their due, and Splinter gets to kick a bit more butt himself than in some iterations of TMNT, the human characters in the film are just sort of there. Fox is fine as April, but the film is incredibly heavy handed in how she is oh-so inspired by the kindly Eric Sachs, who is – gasp! – actually hiding some dark secrets, and she is saddled with some very silly exposition at points. The dependably funny Will Arnett gets a few laughs as Vern Fenwick, April’s cameraman, a character from the original animated series. Fichtner is, as always, a cool and charismatic presence, but this is a by the numbers role he could play in his sleep. Whoopi Goldberg also somewhat randomly pops up in just a couple of scenes as April's skeptical boss, in a fairly nothing role.

The easy highlight of the film is a prolonged action scene, glimpsed in the trailers, involving the Turtles sliding downhill in the snow on their shells, which also involves the Foot, a runaway truck and more. This is an incredibly fast-paced, exciting and clever sequence that stands out as one of the best action set pieces of any of the big summer movies this year. Unfortunately, nothing else in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ever matches this portion, but it’s still worth noting that the film, at least briefly, is able to deliver such thrills. And even as the filmmakers decreased the importance of the ninja part of the title, they do have fun with the turtle part, as those shells sure come in handy several times, in various ways.

It’s a shame that excitement doesn’t carry through the whole movie, and the energy so often lags, especially given the movie’s storyline has some notable flaws and the film often slows down in-between bigger action scenes. Yes, this is a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie and no one is expecting something intricate or detailed story-wise, but it’s hard not to notice that the bad guys’ main plan has some massive holes in it. Without going into specifics, there is a crucial component to what they’re doing that needs to be kept a secret for everything to work as they want it to – but when we see how it’s being accomplished, it’s actually directly pointing the finger at who is behind it all.

The Verdict

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles isn’t great, nor is it a disaster. There have been better stories made about these characters, including the 1990 feature film, but there also have been plenty of weaker ones. Despite the strange revamp of the Turtles into huge, superpowered behemoths who seem ready to throw down with Colossus or the Thing, the film does a nice job of capturing their brotherly in-fighting, camaraderie and rapport. Much of the movie is just sort of “there” though, except for that notably entertaining snow-based action sequence – which stands out for also having fun taking the Turtles out of their usual city terrain.