SPIDER-FIREMAN MAKES BANGKOK LESS DANGEROUS

A Thai fireman recently dressed as Spider-Man to coax an autistic child down from a ledge. Which is really going above and beyond the call compared to our lazy American firemen who just sit around playing cards all day. Wait, what? I meant that they’re heroes. Courageous heroes of freedom.

Teachers at a special needs school in Bangkok alerted authorities on Monday when an autistic pupil, scared of attending his first day at school, sat out on the third-floor ledge and refused to come inside.

Despite teachers’ efforts to beckon the boy inside, he refused to budge until his mother mentioned her son’s love of superheroes, prompting fireman Sonchai Yoosabai to take a novel approach to the problem.

The rescuer dashed back to his fire station and made a quick change into a Spider-Man costume before returning to the boy, he said.

“I told him Spider-Man is here to rescue you, no monsters are going to attack you and I told him to walk slowly towards me as running could be dangerous,” Somchai told local television.

The young boy immediately stood up and walked into his rescuer’s arms, police said. [AP]

Superhero costumes, eh? I may just have to trade in this candy-filled van. Plus, my dick looks really good in spandex.

Make no mistake. Bangkok is still dangerous. If someone hits it just so, you won’t walk right for a week.

By: Donkey Hodey

03.24.2009 @ 12:43 PM

Thank goodness he had a Spiderman costume just laying around the fire station…

By: Fek'lhr

03.24.2009 @ 12:45 PM

An autistic kid on a ledge? Fucker should have dressed up as Lobo!

By: Burnsy

03.24.2009 @ 12:45 PM

He had the Spiderman costume because the dry cleaners accidentally switched it with his ladyboy costume.

By: Burnsy

03.24.2009 @ 12:47 PM

The young boy immediately stood up and walked into his rescuer’s arms… before being drowned by a tsunami.

By: Okuma

03.24.2009 @ 12:47 PM

Remember, this is Bangkok, I’m surprised the guy didn’t try to irradiate and then get bitten by a real spider in a vain attempt to get superpowers. I hear they’re gonna learn how to make stone wheels in Thailand next month.

By: JHC

03.24.2009 @ 12:48 PM

I wouldn’t have fallen for that weak shit. This guy’s obviously not Spider-Man. He doesn’t have an Emo haircut and isn’t dancing like a retarded, white drunk at a wedding reception. Stupid Thai people.

By: Okuma

03.24.2009 @ 12:48 PM

Burnsy, ladyboys are the only good thing to ever come out of Thailand. And I am the only…good…thing to ever come….in? Meh, I got nothing.

By: Stone Soup

03.24.2009 @ 12:50 PM

This reminds me of the time I rescued the little boy from the roof of the local school. He was so happy to see me, he never even asked why Wonder Woman had a beard.

By: Rotwangchung

03.24.2009 @ 12:52 PM

I don’t see why everyone got so upset; Rain-boy was just trying to work out the square root of Thai.

By: Dr. Steve Brule

03.24.2009 @ 12:54 PM

Thailand authorities failed to mention that the fire fighter made several unsuccessful rescue attempts as “Jerry, The Ass Cowboy” before going begrudgingly changing into Spiderman.

By: Shop 101

03.24.2009 @ 12:56 PM

He looks as filthy as the Spiderman I felt up on Hollywood Boulevard. Felt me up ? Aww, fuck it.

By: Dr. Steve Brule

03.24.2009 @ 12:59 PM

Banner Pic: Don Cheadles lives out his silly ebony movie dream

By: Stone Soup

03.24.2009 @ 1:00 PM

The school was so grateful for the fireman’s heroic act, they let him fuck the boy for free.

By: Stone Soup

03.24.2009 @ 1:01 PM

Because it’s Thailand, you see. They’re all pedophiles.

By: Mark It Zero

03.24.2009 @ 1:01 PM

It sucks because that kid had almost calculated Pi to the end just as he was interrupted.

By: Armorcladinosor

03.24.2009 @ 1:02 PM

I’m guessing the 12 year-old tranny hooker that they sent in first wasn’t doing it for the kid either.

By: Fek'lhr

03.24.2009 @ 1:02 PM

Because Lobo is scary and the boy probably would jump! GUY’CHA!

By: Dr. Steve Brule

03.24.2009 @ 1:02 PM

In Thailandese, “Autistic” is slang for “Hole Donor”

By: Dr. Steve Brule

03.24.2009 @ 1:03 PM

Hey, so I just got back from Bangkok, and boy is my mouth tired!

*rim shot*

By: Dr. Steve Brule

03.24.2009 @ 1:06 PM

In Don Cheadles’ Spiderman, he shoots elastic dime bags from his wrists

By: Armorcladinosor

03.24.2009 @ 1:09 PM

I think that picture was taken just before Spiderman made contact with the car. The next picture is a bunch of crushed ducks, a driver with a severed head and arm, Spiderman with two dislocated shoulders, and a boy with a real reason to be crying.

By: Mark It Zero

03.24.2009 @ 1:09 PM

Saved a young autistic Thai boy? Well thank God. That kid can now live a rich and full life ’til the ripe old age of 14.

By: Juan

03.24.2009 @ 1:11 PM

Fireman-Spiderman had to save the boy because Tony Jaa was busy scrubbing down his elephant pals.

By: Armorcladinosor

03.24.2009 @ 1:11 PM

The only reason they saved him was because his parents were rich. Why else do you think an autistic kid would be at a school in Bangkok and not in a sweat shop?

By: Donkey Hodey

03.24.2009 @ 1:12 PM

If this were America, that kid would already be getting offers for guest starring roles on ‘Bones’.

By: Armorcladinosor

03.24.2009 @ 1:13 PM

Thai Spiderman’s mask has thinner slits for him to see out of.

By: Juan

03.24.2009 @ 1:26 PM

That fireman should be fired. I always wear MY Spiderman costume UNDER my work clothes, so I can respond to danger whenever my spider-sense tingles. Or I see unaccompanied children at the mall.

By: Fek'lhr

03.24.2009 @ 1:26 PM

Too bad Firooz didn’t show up and tambourine that retard’s ass off the ledge!

By: nezzer

03.24.2009 @ 1:28 PM

Bangkok Spiderman is just like American Spiderman, except instead of shooting webbing out of his wrists he shoots ping pong balls out his ass.

By: Armorcladinosor

03.24.2009 @ 1:28 PM

I need to stop by the marsh and unload my Candy-filled van. It’s amazing how many strippers and hookers call themselves Candy.

By: jokerswild

03.24.2009 @ 1:28 PM

S’up fuckers? Sorry I’m late to the party. At home sick today so I’ve been sleeping all morning.

By: Charlie Br0nze

03.24.2009 @ 1:35 PM

“I’ll gouge your right eye out with my thumb, I shit you not, you little freak! Now, will you get down here?”

By: nice guy eddie

03.24.2009 @ 1:37 PM

this story reminds me of when i was a kid and locked myself in the tool shed out the back and uncle carl dressed up as spiderman came into the shed and “showed” me why its naughty to do such things……..i burnt the tool shed down the next day and have been burning random sheds around the city ever since.