Usually I give it up for free. Now I feel used and I haven’t even held the check in my hand, just a contract promising me $250. (I hear that’s good money for what I just did.)

Yeah, that’s right. I sold a piece of myself…A piece of writing.

I thought it would feel better, but now I’m preoccupied with the shame of it: It wasn’t that good. People are probably judging me right now! Also I’m stuck in a kind of literary psychosis wondering what it means that Narrative magazine published my istory as part of Narrative Backstage, which is like pay-per-view. Was the piece not quite good enough for the free online version? (What kind of a question is that?)

Aw, hell. What am I doing? I should be grateful anyone’s willing to pay money for my writing. And I AM. Really.

It’s just that once money is exchanged for something…I don’t know…that something feels sorta cheapened. I don’t understand this feeling, but I’m making a real effort to focus on the good parts. Namely that my face appears in a line up next to other REAL writers in a literary magazine that I LOVE.

Thanks! I feel very lucky to have done all this traveling recently and the current series of blog entries have been pretty well received, as I highlight our trip to Peru. I have been lagging on the blog though, short of my usual 3 entries a week. The trip was so amazing and meant so much to me, it’s hard to sit down and put words to page. It may take awhile to write about the whole 2+ week trek and Amazon adventure! Stay tuned… Again, Mazel Tov on the Narrative piece!

You make me laugh. Out loud. I hear you. I find myself very unmotivated since our return from Peru and spend an awful lot of time doing, almost nothing. I think you deserve to crow a bit and enjoy this success. You are very talented, and it’s fun to see your writing out there. Keep it up big girl!

I have to tell you “cousin”- the opening teaser is a great grabber. super Congrats for getting some real world sustenance ( aka CASH) for doing what you obviously do very well!
When it comes to your writing, there is never ‘Nuff said. :-0

Thanks, cuz. The payment finally came in yesterday. Felt like it took forever, and I was starting to sweat a bit, thinking I’d mistaken it for junk mail and accidentally thrown it away. whew. I made a copy of the check, which I will be putting on my office wall. Because I’m a nerd. I’ve been a bit blog-absent this summer, but I’m gonna change my ways and will stop by and visit you 🙂