my SIL is pregnant with her first baby, due at the end of May, beginning of June.
her best friend has 2 children, and both were born by c-section. I don't know this woman, so I can't say for sure that it was unnecessary, and I don't think that's even relevant at this point, but my SIL keeps saying how "tiny" her friend is and how the baby "was just way too big for her" to give birth to.
I'd like to show her some articles about how your body won't grow a baby that is too big for you, and how your height doesn't have much bearing on being able to give birth vaginally to a "large" baby.
I can send her some links to the great birth stories here, but it would be nice to reference some published pieces as well.
anyone have any links handy? I tried searching mothering, but it wasn't working out for me.

I am 5'5, weigh 145 and gave birth to a healthy 6lb 14 and 1/2 oz baby boy who RIPPED me apart with NO episiotomy BTW. My good friend who is 5'2 and weighs around 110 or 115, had an ELEVEN lb(yes thats 11lb)3 oz babe vaginally, w/o drugs and had a teeny little 'skid mark'.

yes, from what ive heard it has nothing to do with "how big you are " per se, its more what your bone structure is on the inside... and how big your vagina is..... everyone is different but it has nothing to do with your weight and height....

I don't know how she will be about stuff written by midwives, but the books Open Season and Ina May's Guide to Childbirth talk about how the pelvic ligaments stretch to accomodate a baby of any size, and how a mother is virtually never unable to birth the baby her body has created simply because of its size.

I know both books do provide footnotes for "scientific studies."

And, there sure are a lot of women on the board who have delivered large babies, sometimes with no interventions. My dh's mom is 5'2" and my dh was 9/5. I myself am 5'1" and TRYING to grow a baby that is at least 10 lbs, so hopefully I will have a story to tell about that soon!

My first was only 7/8, but I did not tear despite delivering in the lithotomy position with forceps. I don't credit the massage; I credit my amazing vaginal powers!

Well, I had a 7lb 11oz dd with an easy 5 hour labor, then a 9lb 7oz ds with an induced, nightmarish, posterior, shoulder dystocia, no pain meds labor. Then 3 weeks ago I had an 18 hour labor with no pain meds, while sleep deprived, baby stuck at 7-8cm for 5 1/2 hours (and pitocin didn't help), then 2 minute long contractions which put the baby's heart rate in danger.... anyhow long story short, I should have been able to deliver my 10lb 13oz ds vaginally but no I had to have a c-birth. Odd because my mom was 10lb 10 oz and my grandma was not that big, same as me medium frame and 5'3"tall....

I am still wondering what went wrong as all I heard was how your body won't make a baby you can't birth. Well mine did. Oh yeah, ds was also posterior and changing positions did nothing to get him turned. I guess those 4 visits to the acupuncurist and 3 to the chiroprator to open my pelvis and turn the baby weren't that effective those last couple of weeks of my pregnancy.

Well, I hope this doesn't sound insulting, and if it does I'll change it, but I really think there is no way anyone will ever deliver a large baby naturally (or even vaginally) in a hospital unless you have a really progressive doctor, it's an accident, or they guessed a lower weight on the estimate. I think the only way to get an accurate idea of what your body really can do is to give birth at home, with a midwife who doesn't have to follow arbitrary rules of time limits and such. Some midwives do a hospital transfer for each slight variation of normal labor. Others will stay home with a woman no matter how long she labors - I heard of one who stayed with a woman who was in transition labor for a week! Everything turned out fine. This woman wouldn't have been given a chance in any hospital (she was also a VBAC).

I know not everyone can give birth at home, and some women just aren't comfortable with it, but I think that if your body failed to do something in the hospital, it doesn't really reflect on you. Pitocin is very dangerous and causes a lot of fetal distress; most likely his size had nothing to do with it.

Greaseball,
ITA now.... As I think back with this one I noticed we had more problems with each painful vaginal exam (like 4 in a couple of hours) and the stupid internal monitor they put in. While waiting for the c-section to be "arranged" I was pushing with each contraction for the 60 minutes before it happened and nobody cared when I told I had to push with every contraction. I was just so exhausted from no sleep for 40 hours and no pain relief for 18 hours of hard contractions. I try to do all my birthing in hospitals without pain meds. What am I thinking??!!!

I couldn't afford a homebirth since it was $3,000 here in SF bay area the most expensive place for a family to live!! I tried to birth at a freestanding birthhome but the midwives rejected me due to previous shoulder dystocia. Really pissed me off too. Anyhow I think I could've had a vaginal birth with a patient midwife who could have helped me get this big posterior babe down the canal!!

Well, I'm 5;2", 95 lbs and I delivered my second child, a 9.13 lb baby boy, completely unmedicated, no interventions, in a hospital last year

I was in transition at 8 cm for 4-1/2 hours as he slowly made his way through my birth canal and I only had one small stitch on my cervix. My ob did do perineal massage with oil which I think helped.

Also, my ob hadn't made any guesses on his weight--which I think can be so counter-productive and fear-inducing. It just never came up. I had complete faith that I could deliver any size baby regardless of the size.