02 December 2012

Can you imagine your life in 10 years from now? Or at least one year...can you? Do you know what would you like to do? To be? Do you have a goal that you're trying to achieve?

Everything begins from a thought, from a simple image in your mind and it's up to you to make it real.

How about ME? Well...let's go back in time for a second.

Five years ago I was completely different person that I am now. Why? Cause I was locked...locked inside my head, didn't want to let anyone inside. I was shy. I was afraid of everything arround me. I was hiding. I had dreams too but I tied them well. Everything was falling apart. My life was falling apart. I didn't want it anymore. I couldn't stand it. I felt like I was drowning in a dirty mud of negativity and darkness. I thought I was lost for good...

But then somebody got me out and said: "-Hey! Look at this world, it's beautiful and you can explore it!". So simple... but it helped me. This person may not know how huge impact she had on me that time... but thanks to her I started my life again... from scratch. Sounds a bit pathethic, right? It's just how I see it and always will.

Since then step by step I've learned how to express myself. It was hard at the beggining but with time I got better and better.

I realesed my dreams, my hostages. I started doing things I always wanted to do, unforgettable, crazy ones (but those stories in another time) and I opened my mind.

Then...again appeared situations that wanted me to fail, to let me down and to stifle this freshness and joy I had. I tried to stay strong but lost my goal somewhere on the way. I made some decisions just to please others and I forgot about myself. This state lasted for a while...but somewhere inside I felt that something was wrong, everyone around me felt this too. That was a proper time for big changes.

I began again. More violently. I silenced all the bad thoughts and burried them deep so they can't get out.

Now. I believe that all I had experienced was for a reason. I am strong. I live. I am happy. I enjoy every little thing I have. I am thankful. Thankful to have such an amazing people around me. Thankful that I got those little talents that I can use to achieve my goals. Thankful that I am able to create my future.

Right now I am in a process of making my dreams come true and changing my life. By now it's going very well ( I am studying two new languages which was my dream since I finished high school and I finally...yes finallydecided to make it real ).