Sterling work by the Emperor left me with yen on the face

You would have thought buying England supremacy over Greece at 0.9 in a 'tenner' a point would have sent the week into overdrive for me. Well, that 'right Royal result' certainly sent the Emperor Blair on a roll back to No 10 with a thumping majority, despite only 40 per cent of the 'plebes' voting for New Labour.

However, the fear of a massive mandate and a possible early referendum on the single currency sent sterling into a whirlpool of despair, burying my sterling/yen position without trace.

Having carefully worked out that the 'nicker' would be a strong currency, provided there was not too much europhile rhetoric, I did not expect the Consul Campbell to flood the market with a wave of referendum spin before Antonius Caesar had been reinstalled in Downing Street. So what was perceived to be a cogent, well thought-out plan was rubbished without trace. The troop bought sterling at ¥169.86 and sold it last Wednesday at ¥167.22 - a loss of 2.64 at £10 per point - £2,640.

We could have done without this, particularly as Astra Zeneca refuses to drift down the slippery slope, as the Gladiator had hoped. This drug mogul is proving to be very robust at the moment, currently standing at £35.50, the troops having 'shorted' this stock last week at £33 - a loss of £2,500! Nil desperandum! The boys believe that this stock is overpriced and will live with the position for the time being, despite the Emperor's obsession to pluck 20,000 nurses and 10,000 doctors out of the trees like ripe cherries, thus offering added stimuli to ancillary health products! No other Government has managed it since Aneurin Bevan served up the NHS in 1951.

Every little helps

Profits have been hard to come by these days, so, on the whole, the Gladiator has not hesitated for a second to bank any profits, however meagre, as soon as they appear. You will recall we had a little flutter on Inhale Therapeutics at $28.49. We required no encouragement to leap into the village and sell them at $33.61 - 512 ticks times £10 makes a profit of £5,120 in anyone's language.

Regus was the recipient of indifferent press last Sunday. This persistent warrior took the decision to short them the previous week at 246.5p, allowing him to close the position last Monday at 213p on Tuesday, realising a modest dividend of £335 on a £10 per point bet.

Finally, the boys did not count on Barclays and RBS making such a bold showing on Monday morning. You will recall that they put a short on HSBC at 907p and on Monday, they duly obeyed the command and drifted to 878p. In the light of the positive tone of the sector, we duly banked £290 without giving the matter another thought.

We forgot that Next was about to enter the FTSE 100 (sold at 987p), so we closed our short position at 975p first thing Monday morning, taking 120 sheets from the bookies' satchels - hardly enough to keep us in Frascati for a month!

The boys are big on Bill

'Go with the flow!' should be the cry at the moment. The next few weeks could prove difficult to read. We may have come close to the bottom of the interest rate cycle in Europe and only a quarter-point cut in the US Fed rate is in the pipeline in the next month or two. So maybe the Gladiator's rather negative tack in recent weeks should be tempered. There are a few interesting stocks that come to mind to join the investment portfolio in the bottom drawer.

They need to keep Anglo-American company there. This precious metal giant has been out of sorts, having eased by 65p since their shares were purchased two weeks ago.

Microsoft immediately comes to mind. I can hear you! That's not very original. Well, the drums have been beating very solidly in beautiful downtown Manhattan about this computer giant. Now that that irritating Janet Reno from the Department of Justice is off Bill Gates's back about monopoly, there is a feeling that $80 is attainable within a matter of weeks.

The tyre market is now in total disarray, with Bridgestone/Firestone being sent to the doghouse. Enter Michelin - stage left! We bought them at €42.10 and let's see how we go.

Finally for you chartist geeks, if General Motors can break though the $60 barrier, they could have a run on the rails. So the Gladiator filled his boots in the September contract at $59.50!