Popblerd! Predicts Super Bowl XLVII

Popblerd! staff members sent in their predictions for the game. Everyone considers themselves football experts so expect to read how the Harbaugh brothers will prepare to out-scheme each other. Be ready to read about how Aldon Smith coming off the edge is reliant on how well Justin Smith plays. Okay, I’m lying. Some of these predictions are fun. Some of them are serious. We just love to prognosticate.

Predictions

Mike A.: 49ers 28, Ravens 17
I’m not exactly a huge football fan and I know next to nothing about either team, other than they’re both coached by a Harbaugh. But if a San Francisco victory means we can finally stop having to hear about Ray Lewis incessantly, then go Niners!

Ken: 49ers 32, Ravens 27
Akers misses an easy field goal, Pollard takes out Moss, Kaepernick runs for a 30-yd touchdown. Flacco leads the Ravens down the field to win the game only to toss a interception with less than 2 minutes to go.

Jesse: Rapid City Monument 28, Gotham City Rogues 7
I know, I know! Gotham is the favorite but I feel like this is Rapid City’s year. This is, of course, barring any interruptions from masked terrorists. We all know how last year’s game ended.

Big Money: 49ers 21, Ravens 17
I say security tries to escort Michelle off stage during the Destiny’s Child reunion because no one can remember who she is.

Koomdogg: 49ers 31, Ravens 24
Ray Lewis goes on a deer antler dust binge before the game and tears Kaepernick’s non-throwing arm off, but Kaepernick still manages to sprint 98 yards for the game-winning TD. In the end zone, he Kaepernicks(TM) with his one remaining arm and sets off a merchandising onslaught that will go on for months.

Drew: 49ers 31, Ravens 28
Regardless of what players actually contribute most to the outcome of this game, it’s gonna be billed as Ray Lewis vs. Colin Kaepernick. Despite the fact that (arguably) neither player was the most instrumental in winning their respective championship games, we’re going to hear about Lewis, Kaepernick, the Harbaugh brothers, and pretty much nobody else. I predict that Lewis’s perpetually weepy mug will get on my nerves almost immediately, and my resentment at the outcome of their Patriots match-up will result in me spending the entirety of this game singing the praises of Kaep and Gore and the like. I also predict that approximately half of Joe Flacco’s touchdown passes are the result of Flacco bombing the ball down the field and borrowing Jesus from Ray Lewis for a minute to pray that Torrey Smith is somewhere near the end zone.

But seriously, I feel that this may be the end of the road for the Ravens. Fire in the belly can only get you so far, and these Niners have been unstoppable. I thought the Packers would give them trouble — they didn’t. After Matt Ryan played an insane first half in the Falcons game, I thought ATL had it sewn up — they didn’t. The Ravens are looking to put a bow on their grand comeback/redemption/final salvo, and I think the Niners just might be the team to nip that in the bud. Unless, of course, something wild happens and Ray Lewis gets away with m– whoops, poor phrasing. I mean, unless Ray Lewis galvanizes his team and slaughters the competition. If they give it their best stab, they may acquit themselves well.

Either way, it’ll be a killer game. Niners by a field goal.

Collin: No pick
Besides Saints games, MMA stuff, and the Olympics, i honestly don’t really follow sports, and so really can’t make an informed prediction.

But the Super Bowl being down here in New Orleans is pretty exiciting and has been the biggest news story this weekend. I’ll be avoiding the French Quarter since that will likely be crowded as all hell.

May: 49ers 28, Ravens 14
Because I said so.

Tristan: Ravens 41, 49ers 35
I’m no good at picking scores, as I’ve missed every single week in the past five years of my fantasy Pick ‘Em league, but I do hope the Ravens will win their second Super Bowl. I wouldn’t mind the 49ers winning either, as they would hold on to their undefeated Super Bowl record to get to 6-0 in the big game. That would be something!

Prop Bets

Ken: Over under where Bernard Pollard murders someone?GG: Under – since he’s not playing the Patriots.

Ken: How many wardrobe changes for Beyonce?Drew: Four. One for each guest star.