Dos and Don’ts of Wedding Stationery

Times are changing, and what your mom and grandmother “had” to do for their wedding invitations isn’t necessarily what still goes today. Some things, however, are still considered etiquette no-no’s. Here’s our list of what you can and should do, verse what you should be avoiding with your paper goods.

DO personalize your invitations to match your wedding style! This is is best and easiest way to let your guests know they are in for something extra special on your big day. Starting with your Save the Dates, know what your wedding style will be (formal & fancy, casual & lighthearted) and make sure your wedding paper encompasses that same vibe. Continue that feeling throughout your invitations, and bring it right on into the wedding day with programs and other day-of items!

DON’T wait until the last minute gather addresses. This part of the process seems to always cause delays in the send out date. As soon as you begin planning, start compiling your guest list so you have a headcount to tell your vendors. Then, contact friends and family for their current address.

DON’T feel like you have to send out Save the Dates. This is a huge shift from when your mother was getting married. Save the Dates are a new trend in the bridal industry, and if you’re budgeting can be the first thing to knock off your list. You should send out Save the Dates as soon as possible if your wedding will require travel plans including flights, especially overseas, or if your wedding falls on a holiday weekend such as Labor or Memorial Day. If you’re not going to be able to get your Save the Dates out before the 5-6 month mark, then don’t worry about them! Instead, send your invitations out with 8 weeks to go, and your guests will still have plenty of notice!

Carrie’s Modern Garden Invitation suite for her Memorial Day Weekend Wedding

DO send your invitations out 6 weeks prior if you sent out Save the Dates, and 8 weeks prior if you didn’t, or if you have a lot of out-of-towners coming to your wedding. Sending them out any sooner will make your RSVPs seem less urgent than they are, and will be more likely be lost or forgotten.

DON’T feel like you have to do use proper names when addressing. If the feel of your wedding is casual, then addressing to “Jacki & Rudy Gil” is perfectly acceptable.

Nicole’s beautifully addressed Wedding Envelopes

DO ask your caterer for the day when they need their final headcount for food. Count back one week, and make your RSVPs due that day. (Remember to avoid weekends or holidays!) No matter what kind of RSVP you choose (traditional, postcard or online), you’re going to have people that don’t RSVP.

DO call, text or Facebook the guests that don’t RSVP. Even though it’s a hassle, you don’t want to be short on food or seats because people show up that weren’t accounted for. And just the opposite, you don’t want to pay for those people who do not plan on attending.

DON’T add your registry information to you wedding invitation. This is one thing that hasn’t changed in the etiquette world. Registry information should be saved for individual shower invitations or for your wedding website.

Mary Beth’s Garden Party Shower Invitation

DON’T let the invitation process stress you out. If you’re overwhelmed by searching online, talk to a stationer or designer to help get the process started. A little guidance could go a long way! If my style isn’t your style, don’t worry, I have friends in the biz. Send me a message and I’ll be happy to refer you!