YouTube makeup diva GlowPinkStah’s Black Swan makeup tutorial is hilarious, and less likely than the film to give you nightmares full of intense red eyes. [YouTube]

Stick a fork in it – even Tila Tequila‘s given up on MySpace. [Boing Boing]

Don’t have a boyfriend? Never had a boyfriend? Luan Legacy wants you to calm the eff down already: “It’s like getting your period! It happens at different times! For different people!” [YouTube via YOMYOMF]

We haven’t checked in on Tila Tequila in awhile, but she’s home again (in TMZ’s headlines)–this time, involved in a kidnapping plot that involves armed men, travel across state lines, wife-thieving, death threats and a restraining order.

Sounds like just an average day for Ms. Nguyen. But this time, she’s not the one making the crazy claims. Wait, WHAT?

Photographer Garry Sun filed an application for a restraining order in L.A. County Superior Court, claiming on October 19, Tila and the armed men drove to the Texas house of his alleged girlfriend, Shyla Jennings, kidnapped her, somehow got Shyla on a plane and flew her to L.A.

Sun claims Tila then threatened Shyla … If anyone notified cops, she and Garry would be toast.

You may or may not already know that May is Asian-Pacific American Heritage Month. It’s a month meant to celebrate Asians and Pacific Islanders in the United States, all of us! We at DISGRASIAN like to look at this time as an opportunity to take a collective hating break, and to really take note of the wacky and diverse population of AAPIs in this country–AMAZIANS and DISGRASIANS alike! Love or hate, we’re all brothers and sisters.

TILA’S TAKING APPLICATIONS FOR HER “FASHION LINE!” Underoo designers, this could be your big break!

Sounds like the business lady has already figured out the first step to success: delegasian:

1) I already have everything taken care of so you dont [sic] have to worry about putting out money for anything. I of course am the CEO of this new fashion line, my [sic] appointed my sister as the President in Charge, and now we are giving people out there a chance to be a part of our team and become billionaires! No. I am not Kidding.

So listen, me and my sister are already getting the fabrics and coming up with the designs, however, this line is going to be very big so we need at least a few more designers on board! So if you are an aspiring fashion designer, stylist, etc, well here is your chance to be a part of something massive!!!!

Here’s what you have to do for us to accept you into our team:

First of all this is my fashion line so it has to represent me. So I like stuff that is edgy, cutting edge, chic, sexy, not trashy or cheap looking, glamourous [sic], high fashion, outrageous, bedazzles, etc….. give me the best you got!!!!! Now instructions below on how u will be accepted to join my fashion team:

1)draw up sketches and designs of your most creative designs, what fabric, etc.

2) the more variety of ideas you can send us, the better so we can see what your style is.

This time around, however, Tila’s page is “secret.” Like, tippity Top Secret. Like Classified Information secret. Like I’d-tell-you-but-I’d-have-to-kill-you secret. Her reasoning being, as she Tweeted on her new “secret” page, to keep out the “filthy haters” and “Media peeps.”