"O God, I could be bounded in a nut shell and count myself
a king of infinite space,
were it not that I have bad dreams."
- Hamlet
Act II scene ii

1 April 2012

Sponsorship

Bloggers who signed up to become the first residents of Blogland will be pleased to learn that The Development Committee have managed to secure almost US$2.2m in sponsorship. This will help us to launch our new society and ensure that there is a seamless transition from our old lives to the new lives we shall commence very shortly. Most of the sponsorship has come from two anonymous donors, one based in Wales and the other in Nebraska USA. I have contacted them personally on your behalf to thank them for their astounding generosity.

Anyway, the upshot is that one way travel to the island will now be entirely free for all emigrants! We shall all depart for Phuket in Thailand on the same day. Then a fleet of cruisers will whisk us across the Andaman Sea to our final destination - a veritable paradise on Earth - Blogland. Ah! I can hear those turquoise waves beating on those silver shores even now. All accommodation is finished, a team of servants and other ancillary workers (e.g. Thuza) has been recruited and everything seems to be in place ready for our arrival. The Burmese workers are learning the national anthem - "Island of Dreams" though their pronunciation needs improvement and a large Blogland flag is already fluttering from the mast adjacent to our luxurious social club.

Thuza - recently appointed as my personal assistant

Emigrants should report to the main information desk at their nearest international airport by midday on Wednesday April 11th. There your business class tickets will be available for you to pick up. Please remember your current passport:-

Have I missed anybody out? Please let me know as soon as possible via the Comments facility and your onward travel tickets will also be arranged.

Blogland

Bloggers who missed the sign-up deadline for emigration will be pleased to know that an extra four villas are available, set back slightly from one of the main beaches in a tropical clearing, less than a hundred metres from the social club. Thatched in palm, each villa has a bamboo verandah and through the spindly coconut palm trunks of the native forest you will catch glimpses of the Andaman Sea sparkling under a silvery moon. I doubt that there is anywhere on this planet more beautiful. All you have to do is to indicate your interest in the "Comments" section.

To repeat...The travel date is Wednesday April 11th. Your tickets will be waiting for you. Remember your passport!

Oh. Um, I didn't realise it was so soon. I have my solo exhibition opening on the 2 June in Tauranga, and an awful lot of painting to do before then. But I suppose I could paint on Blog Island, and then fly back for the opening. Is there anywhere suitable for me to paint there? My present studio is about 100 sq feet, and just big enough...Any framers amongst the residents?

JENNY Keith will have a new and better "NASA" in the corner of your unique villa. Research tells me that Wales is in fact home to no less than three and a half millionaires! None in North Wales though.EARL GRAY Crate 'em up and they'll travel in the hold of the aircraft.KATHERINE Your solo exhibition has now been transferred to the social club in Blogland. A week or two after your flight to Phuket, your Tauranga studio will be dismantled and shipped to Blogland. In the meantime you'll just have to come snorkelling with me and gain some inspiration for your next artworks. Framing? No problem. We'll use driftwood from the beach.SHOOTING PARROTS Sorry mate but I have already cancelled your US vacation. Just forget about it and get your ass to Ringway on the 11th.

I'm not saying anything.... oh, wait, I just DID say something.... I haven't got a passport.... haven't even got a fishing licence yet!! Besides the electronic tag round my neck would explode if I went more than 250 metres away from my front door!

Uf, Madrid - didn't know they had an airport in that second-rate city.Ok, we'll make the effort, as the rewards are worth it; if we get the donkeys well-fed today, setting off tomorrow we should be at the airport by the 11th. See yous soon :)

HELEN Will it be okay if his feet stick out of the window?ARCTIC FOX If you want to join us I can arrange a fake passport. Fishing licences are not required in Blogland. I think you'll enjoy spear fishing around the reef but don't point that thing at me!BRIAN Looking forward to meeting you! I have already taken the liberty of signing you up for the beach wrestling competition. Your first bout is against Katherine from New Zealand. She'll be well-oiled.

SHOOTING PARROTS "...what form of government you have in mind..." For second person singular please insert first person plural. The government of our new realm will evolve democratically from the very beginning under the old cry of the musketeers - "All for one and one for all". As our new land will be inhabited by intelligent, free-thinking souls we will not fall into the sort of traps that have plagued western democracies but our governance of the servants and ancillary workers will need to be clarified. By the way, I have been drawn to fight you in the beach wrestling competition. I have been watching old videos of Mick McManus at work so watch out!

Mr Pudding welcomes all genuine comments - even those with which he disagrees. However, puerile or abusive comments from anonymous contributors will continue to be given the short shrift they deserve. Any spam comments that get through Google/Blogger defences will also be quickly deleted.