The Leggy Adventures Of Ken & Glenn

The Adventures of Ken & Glenn

Ooh La La! Ken & Glenn Find A Supermodel Named Jen

If you don't want to know the dating habits of troubled rocker Axl Rose...

Or the intimate life details of a blond, 6-foot model named Jennifer ...

Or what that model thinks of Newport News ...

Then stop right here.

But if you're into all that, we've got a treat. It's more like a tale of obsession.

It started when our friend Pam recklessly showed us her Cosmopolitan while we were hanging at her Poquoson apartment.

Glenn picked up the fragrant magazine and, within seconds, found Jennifer on page 99. She was kneeling gently on a golden beach. A leopard-skin swimsuit covered a tiny swatch of her Coppertone skin.

Above her floated two seemingly out-of-place words: "newport news." That was the name of our beloved hometown! Right there in Cosmo!

Could this curvy supercreature live in Newport News? Perhaps - we hoped - she had posed on the sands of Huntington Park beach (just blocks from the headquarters of your Daily Press).

We were determined to find out. And find her.

Reading the fine print at the bottom of the ad, we learned that "Newport News" is a fashion catalog headquartered in Hampton. So, in search of passion and romance, we went to the company's offices on City Line Road.

Ken placed the ad on the receptionist's desk, pointed to it and said, "We're looking for this model."

In between answering phone calls and giving us a these-guys-are-creepy look, the receptionist explained that it's "highly unlikely" the figure on the page lives in Hampton Roads.

She suggested we try asking somebody at the Metropolitan Agency modeling agency in New York.

Ken eagerly called. Finding out her name (Jennifer Driver) was easy, but finding her wasn't.

First, Michelle, a chit-chatty Metropolitan representative, gave Ken a modeling agency's number in Paris. Jennifer may be there, she said.

Ken called.

"(Insert incomprehensible French phrase here)," answered a fast-talking Parisian secretary. Annoyed, she switched to English when Ken started speaking American.

She said that Jennifer had flown to Milan (Italy, that is) for a fashion show the day before. The femme franais hung up on Ken before he could get a phone number.

"Ooh la la," replied the man (we're not making this up) when Ken asked for Jennifer's number in Milan. He then made a clicking sound with his tongue and said he didn't know where she was staying.

Fortunately, though, Michelle in New York hooked us up. She gave us a number in Milan where we might find our Newport News beach princess. Ken left a message with Jennifer's Canadian model-friend, with whom the object of his obsession was staying that week.

Then, after nearly two weeks of searching, it finally happened: Jennifer called Ken collect from Milan. (Sorry, boss.)

Before we tell you all about her personal life, there are a few things you should know: She's 6 feet tall, 130 pounds, 21 years old, a real blond and not from Newport News. And the Cosmo photo-shoot wasn't done within earshot of Warwick Boulevard. Try tropical Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.

She said she doesn't remember posing for the jungle-cat shot that ran in Cosmo.

"I had so many swimsuits that afternoon," she explained.

A Jennifer bonus: She has a Southern accent (she's from Raleigh, N.C.).

One big drawback: She dated Axl Rose last year.

For those of you who don't know about Mr. Rose, he's lead singer of the band Guns 'n' Roses and known for committing acts of violence against human beings.

"He's really shy. He's a very nice guy," Jennifer promised. "He didn't beat me up or anything like that. I'm a little bigger than him anyway."

Let us remind you that she's a towering 6 feet tall.

"I love it. I really do," she said in a serious tone. "It's very powerful."

Jennifer is single, mostly because she lives out of her suitcase and doesn't like the vain male models she works with.

"Anyone who looks in the mirror more than I do is out of the question," she said.

She admitted to never setting a lovely tan foot in Newport News.

But don't despair, readers. She may visit this August while in Virginia for a friend's wedding.

"It's not a goal for me right now to go to Newport," she said. "But I want to visit. I'm always open for new places."

About that ad in Cosmo, Jennifer. Do you like it as much as we do?

"That picture actually was shot at an angle that I look heavy in," she said. "I look fat in it."

KEN&GLENN UPDATE. To all our fans: You guys rule. We've been getting a small stack of "fan e-mail" each week, and we love it. Keep it up. Write us. Call us. Send us your ideas for adventures. Tell us about the quirky people in your neighborhood or the stuff that happens in your life. We're at: