Everyone is a consumer, even married couples. The only problem is that some wives or husbands make purchases not known by their spouses. This is called financial infidelity. It is something that causes as much detriment in marriages as deceiving the person who was supposed to trust you for the rest of both your lives.

Financial lies come to light eventually. When this happens, the couple ends up arguing over money, losing trust, or getting a divorce.

Types of Financial Infidelity

Finances are important in a marriage. Infidelity in this aspect of the relationship comes in myriad forms. Some are simple, others are more complicated. The following are some of the financial lies married people keep from their spouses:

Hiding debt. This is a serious but less common type of financial disloyalty. According to the NEFE survey, 1 out of the 12 respondents admitted that they had kept the truth about their liabilities. The amount can range from hundreds to hundreds of thousands of dollars. By the time the spouse finds out about the debt, it would already be a challenge to pay it off.

Secret spending. The most common form of financial infidelity is purchasing in secret. This may be a small purchase, a bank statement, or a bill. The spouse hides every proof of purchase so that the other spouse finds out. The money could be spent on hobbies, vices, clothes, jewelry, or gifts. The wife or husband could tell the spouse a lower amount than what was actually spent. The spouse could also delay the payments of monthly bills, damaging their credit rating.

Hidden bank accounts. There are actually spouses who have hidden bank accounts. They fund this bank account without their husband or wife ever knowing. This kind of infidelity happens to couple who are usually apart because of their work.

Lying about the real income. Telling your spouse lies about our income is another form of financial infidelity. Based on a 2018 Safe Home survey, 15% of women and 13% of men deceive their spouses about their true earnings. Some tell their spouses they earn less than they really make because they are afraid their spouses might spend all of it. Others make exaggerations about how much they make because they’re embarrassed. There are also cases where a spouse leaves the house daily to make the other spouse believe that he or she has a job when the truth is that the spouse is unemployed.

Who Does This Kind of Financial Infidelity

Financial Infidelity happens to people from all levels of income. Those who are rich just have the ability to create various schemes when they hide their money. Those who earn less have more difficulty doing this because of limited freedoms.

• Age. According to the CreditCards.com survey in 2015, one of four people ages 18 to 29 admitted to keeping their large purchases hidden. Only 15% of people at least 65 years old said the same thing. Based on the NEFE survey, men below 35 years old are highly likely to be financial infidels. Women committed more financial infidelity when they reach 35 to 44 years of age.

• Gender. Men and women commit financial infidelity, but men are usually more guilty. The NEFE survey says that only 38% of women do this, while 46% of men commit it. Men are more likely to lie about their earnings and major purchases. Women lie more about their liabilities than men.

Reasons

People become financial infidels because of so many reasons. Here are some of them:

• Guilt or embarrassment. After buying something impulsively, a spouse may become guilty about it and ends up lying about it to the other spouse.

• Conflicting goals. Some partners do not have the same money values. The more responsible one usually has no choice but to commit financial infidelity so that he or she can reach the goal for the two of them. To avoid conflict, they commit this type of infidelity.

• Addiction. Gambling and shopping addiction could be strong reasons for financial addiction.

• Fear. Domestic abuse can be a significant reason for committing financial infidelity. A man afraid of his wife leaving him for losing his job could also lie.

Financial infidelity is common, but it doesn’t mean it should be treated as an unavoidable element of every marriage. To void it, honesty and communications should endure between couples. Only then would consequences such as separation and divorce can be eliminated.