Dave Bing's mentor program more than doubles in size in 17 months

Inside a classroom at the East English Village Preparatory Academy in Detroit on Wednesday, April 6, 2016, (L to R) former Detroit Mayor Dave Bing laughs with sophomore Orlando Evans, 16, and his BINGO mentor Darryl Nolen, an administrative assistant with the UAW.(Photo: Eric Seals Detroit Free Press)Buy Photo

Orlando Evans is only 16 years old, but he has lived in five different places, three of them temporary foster homes as his single mother struggled to raise eight children.

He said all he has ever wanted his whole life was to be happy and to have a father figure to replace the dad who “ran out when I was little.”

Last summer, he got one — 49-year-old Darryl Nolen, a UAW Ford representative who is mentoring for the first time. Now, Orlando is happy.

“I know I can trust him,” Orlando said. “I don’t really talk to a lot of people about what I am going through and how I’m feeling. I don’t want to talk to a therapist or a foster parent, because you’re getting paid to love me. You’re getting paid to listen to me. I want somebody who is listening to me and giving me words of encouragement because they want to.

“When I met him, it was crazy. He’s like a 49-year-old version of me. I tell this man everything. I’m not the type of person who likes expressing my feelings ... he's been through it, too."

Nolen, who was born and raised in Detroit by a single mother, who also sometimes struggled, said Orlando has become like a son.

“For me, it was spiritual,” he said. “When we met, and he was sharing his story, I just felt like God was rewinding the tape in my life. I was sitting there blown away. … This is a perfect match. Beyond this academic season, I want to play a role in his life, and if I continue to be his mentor, so be it.”

When former Detroit Mayor Dave Bing dreamed of a one-on-one mentoring program for young black boys 17 months ago, this duo was what he saw in his mind’s eye, he said. He founded the Bing Youth Institute and kicked off the BINGO program with four schools and 40 kids, The program, whose acronym stands for Boys Inspired through Nurturing Growth & Opportunities, is now in 15 schools with 100 boys paired with 100 mentors.

The program is among literally dozens of mentoring efforts across the city and thousands across the country, some of which begun after President Barack Obama launched the My Brother's Keeper mentoring initiative to connect young people to those who could provide support and skills to get into college and get jobs.

“There are so many young men out here that are just like Orlando who don’t have anybody they can trust, don’t have anybody they can go to for advice,” Bing said. “That’s what this program is all about. There are lot of kids like Orlando, but there aren’t a lot of guys like Darryl. So my biggest challenge was trying to convince black men of not only the need but an opportunity for them also because it’s a two-way street. You can see the emotion between the two of them. It’s a love affair, and you can’t put money on that.”

The program has three stages: one-on-one mentoring, social and emotional learning and mentor-mentee outings. The mentor requirements are simple: The men must be successful, committed and African American.

“My biggest challenge was getting black men to step up,” Bing said. “Most guys like Darryl are into their careers or into their own families and just don’t have the time to make the commitment necessary to give to a kid like this. I am so pleased with the black men who have stepped up. Right now, it’s all black men and black boys but ultimately, we will be looking at the Latino community. I’m getting a lot of my white friends saying I want to help. And I’ve said to them, ‘Not yet.’ We want people to understand that we as a community can do this.”

Today, the Detroit Pistons will announce a $75,000 grant, its second to the program, so it can continue its work.

“The success of this program is a credit to Dave’s leadership and we are proud to be part of his efforts,” Pistons owner Tom Gores said in a statement. “I believe one of the best ways to help a community is by supporting its young people. Kids need mentors they can look up to who can help them develop skills and gain valuable life experience.”

An initiative that has become a movement, Bing’s program mentors come from various successful careers; a third from the auto industry, the others from the fields of law, education, sports management health care and public safety. Forty-four of the mentors are in their 40s, a third are in the 30s and the rest are spread through their 20s, 50s and 60s. Two are in their 70s.

Between counseling and social interaction, the mentors help their young charges deal with hard circumstances and memories. For Orlando, that includes not seeing his father for the first time until he was 6.

"I was in first grade, it my first time seeing my daddy," he said. "I remember it so vividly. He came to the classroom in some white and green Coogi pants, a blue Roccawear shirt and some all white Air Force ones and he told my teacher, 'That’s my son.' And I’m looking up at him saying, 'I don’t know you.' "

Orlando has spent a third of his life with family or in temporary foster care, including last year. He was returned home just before he met Nolen.

Bing says he believes that the young men who are gaining insight and guidance from their mentors may one day become mentors themselves.

“Orlando will be one of our best ambassadors,” he said. “One day, he’ll say ‘Somebody stepped up and helped me. I’m going to step up.' "

Orlando quickly agreed.

“The only thing I want in life is to be happy and have a family,” he said, adding that his mentor “brings a light to me. I come from a dark place. I’ve seen a lot to be just 16. I was depressed. I had went through a lot. It’s like a whole other realm. He brought the light.”

And Orlando, as the second-oldest child in his family, is already getting lots of practice.

“My little brother dresses like me, gets his hair cut like me. That makes me happy. When I get home, my little sister runs up and acts like it’s been a hundred years since she’s seen me. All my nieces and nephews under five, it’s like a parade when they see me. I’m mentoring them now.”

Orlando said he’s “infatuated with cars and infatuated with music.” He also is a writer, just for himself.

“I write it and put it in a drawer and read it sometimes,” he said. “I have a lot of self-esteem problems … but it’s getting better. It’s getting a lot better. I’m beginning to think, no, I know for a fact, that I can do this, I can do that — without having second thoughts about myself. You know how Rocky had the old man in his corner?

“This is my old man,” he said, nodding toward Nolen.

Contact Rochelle Riley: rriley99@freepress.com. Follow her on Twitter @rochelleriley for updates on the #Flintwatercrisis and the Detroit Public Schools.