''''But evolution is only a theory!''. Wi-wi Bu-but which is true, I mean it is a theory and it's good that I say that. I think it gives you hope, doesn't it, that maybe they feel the same way about the theory of... gravity...
...and they might just float the fuck away.''http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYs5homewD4

CLERK: No, we don't have Rarnaby Budge by Charles Dickens with two K's, the well-known Dutch author, and perhaps to save time I should add that we don't have Carnaby Fudge by Darles Chickens, or Farmborough Sludge by Marles Pickens, or even Stickwick Stapers by Farles Wickens with four M's and a silent Q! Why don't you try W. H. Smith's?
CUSTOMER: I did. They sent me here.
- Monty Python's Flying Circus, "The Bookshop Sketch"

"Owl," said Rabbit shortly, "you and I have brains. The others have fluff. If there is any thinking to be done in this Forest - and when I say thinking I mean thinking - you and I must do it." - A. A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner

(03-03-2011 11:46 AM)Unbeliever Wrote: CLERK: No, we don't have Rarnaby Budge by Charles Dickens with two K's, the well-known Dutch author, and perhaps to save time I should add that we don't have Carnaby Fudge by Darles Chickens, or Farmborough Sludge by Marles Pickens, or even Stickwick Stapers by Farles Wickens with four M's and a silent Q! Why don't you try W. H. Smith's?
CUSTOMER: I did. They sent me here.
- Monty Python's Flying Circus, "The Bookshop Sketch"

I absolutely love Monty Python, you earn 10,000 points

I love automated answer machines now, I was waiting on-hold to complain to Blockbuster online, I interrupt the answer bot with a grumble of "fuck you" and it actually responded "I'm sorry you feel that way, I will now transfer you to a live operator"

This entire sketch is one of the greatest funny quotes of all time. I used to be able to do the entire thing from memory.

"Owl," said Rabbit shortly, "you and I have brains. The others have fluff. If there is any thinking to be done in this Forest - and when I say thinking I mean thinking - you and I must do it." - A. A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner

I know that explaining a joke quite spoils it but... I'm not getting it... sorry

It was when you responded to the video of the 1987 horror movie "Rock N' Roll Nightmare". I love how you identified the things thrown at him as "flying nipple-sucking sea stars". I thought that was hilariously brilliant

I know that explaining a joke quite spoils it but... I'm not getting it... sorry

It was when you responded to the video of the 1987 horror movie "Rock N' Roll Nightmare". I love how you identified the things thrown at him as "flying nipple-sucking sea stars". I thought that was hilariously brilliant

"I feel younger now than when I was in my 30s and 40s and had all those problems." -- Ida Keeling, 95-year-old woman from the Bronx who set world record after running 60m in 29.86 seconds in 2011; she is the oldest woman to do so.

And recently a customer on drive through
Customer: "I'd like a medium rootbeer friz"
Me: "Do you mean rootbeer freeze???"
Customer: "Yeah that!"

Oh and when I first heard the song "Only Girl In The World" by Rhianna I thought the opening line was "Want you to love me like I'm a pot pie".... doesn't help that I heard it at work and I work at KFC. I still lol heartily when the song comes on.