Thursday, January 11, 2007

Deux Ewes

Yes, I know. I promised a write-up of the charting software last week. I want to do it right, is all, and there simply hasn't been time. Every day this week has seen me leave the house at 5 am and not return until about 11 pm. Daddy is tired.

Victorine has also picked this highly inconvenient time to pay us a visit. She's doing wardrobe for a Canadian all-sheep opera company that's on tour with Massenet's Manon Gigot and Poulenc's La Voix Ewe-maine.

The rest of the crew is staying at the Allerton Hotel, but Victorine was asked to vacate her room after she and Dolores drank everything in the minibar, ripped the shirt off the bellhop who was sent to provide refills, and then attempted to do the same to the security guard who responded to the bellhop's desperate cries for help.

Dolores was unapologetic. "If they want to be left alone, they shouldn't wear those hot little uniforms," she said.

Victorine's presence is not helping little Harry, whose nerves were shot after a week of living with Mrs. Teitelbaum and her cat, Tinkles.

Mrs. Teitelbaum sent him home with a special Memory Scrapbook she created to commemorate the visit, but we have to keep it hidden because every time Harry sees it he starts to fray. I've tried to keep him quiet and calm, but Victorine has taken to sneaking up behind him and screeching "MIAOU!" and I'm afraid the twitch in his left eye may become permanent.

If you were coming home after an eighteen-hour day to this, would you have time to do justice to a very cool piece of charting software? Yeah, I didn't think so.

So have a little pity and a little patience. Or Victorine may show up at your house next.

42 comments:

Oh dear gods! I absolutely love your blog. The (mis)Adventures of Dolores need to be in a collection of some sort for her many adoring fans. Trust me on this.And if you ever make it back down the Indianapolis area again, let me know. I know of this great little yarn shop! *evil grin*

I'm with wyrdsheep on the Adventures of Dolores - and there are actually SEVERAL nice yarn shops in Indianapolis. I'm sure we'd be happy to drive you around to them and then feed you, that is, if you can get out on parole from prison. (hahaha!)

My kids are scared of roaches and anything creepy crawly. Sometimes when I see the back of their necks exposed as they sit at the table studiously doing homework, I can't help but take a bit of mohair and sorta swipe it across that spot back there that really makes one squirm slowly - as if something was crawling on them.

And then I fall on the floor laughing my ass off when they jump out of the chair screaming! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Mon dieu, Franklin, what is that university-cum-sweatshop doing that you're laboring 18 hours a day? Please remember to eat well and meditate a few minutes each day to keep your health (mental and physical)intact.

Stay well and keep your bedroom door locked at night - Victorine likes your epaulets you know... (My word verification has "izvxn" - they must know about Victorine and Dolores.)

"Victorine has also picked this highly inconvenient time to pay us a visit. She's doing wardrobe for a Canadian all-sheep opera company that's on tour with Massenet's Manon Gigot and Poulenc's La Voix Ewe-maine."

You'd better hurry up with that charting software comparison because mine is almost done and it's going up this weekend. Just finished test driving Knit Foundry's Knit Visualizer. Astonishing program as opposed to Stitch Motif Maker and Cochenille's Stitch Painter.

Perhaps you should take pity on the poor little ball (of yarn). I think Harry needs to be knitted into some socks which can reside safely on your feet. I don't mean to be unkind - but wasn't that why he came to live at your house in the first place?

Franklin! 18 hours a day? I thought it was just us New Yawkers who worked too damn hard. And your house sounds crowded. There is a budget gem of a hotel on Miracle Mile that we wrote about at T:Style; it has a room with photographic wall paper depicting (uh oh), cable stitches. It's better than a padded cell, though.

Happy New Year to you sweetie! Oh, and tell Delores I saw her ex-man "Rambo" when I was in Golburn, New South Wales at The Big Merino Tourist Shop.

I agree with wyrdsheep and caroline that the Dolores chronicles would make an excellent book. Have you seen Yarnival? Your blog entries would be perfect for the Feb 2007 issue: http://blogcarnival.com/bc/submit_417.html

What fun Harry had! Does he look a little lighter-weight to you now that he's back from his refreshing afternoon jogs? Wanted to let you know a friend and I were looking through knitting stuff on cafepress and I saw your designs :D

I really need to start putting on an Attends and having tissue on hand before I read your blog darling. Everytime I read it, I end up laughing hard enough to pee in my panties and until tears roll down my face! ACK...And if anyone is keeping count? I vote HELL YEAH toward the book. (yep I'm from the South, y'all)

Queerjoe....Why is it that Queer Joe has become the king gay knitter/blogger ( I hate that sheepish look on his face in his profile)...It seems to me that you are far more cosmopolitan and acctractive than boring old Joe...HMMMMM

Copyright and Posting Notice

All original content of this blog, both words and images, is held in copyright by F. Habit. Use of any kind, in any medium, for any reason without express, prior written consent is prohibited.

Permission is not granted for the posting of any content from this site to Pinterest, Facebook, Twitter, or any other Web site.

Please do not provide links to any product, service, organization or cause when leaving comments unless directly related to the topic of the post. Unsolicited advertising will be deleted and repeat offenders will be blocked.

When in doubt, please ask. I'm not mean, I'm just committed to preserving the quality of experience for my readers.