"The Beer Tastes Like Piss"

In college, I used to DJ at my fraternity's parties. I would sit in the corner with the sound system, a microphone and a stack of cold beers. Since I didn't trust anyone with my CD's and the fact that girls would dance on a platform directly over my head, I found it increasingly difficult to leave the DJ booth. I eventually became so attached to that spot that I didn't even leave to pee. I would just duck down and drain my main vein into a plastic cup. Sometimes girls would come to the booth to make requests, and I would poke my head up to talk to them while I was doing the deed below.

After one particularly long leak, I managed to fill up three cups with warm fluid. I set them on the windowsill and continued to party. At the end of the night, after the crowd had dispersed, I went onto the dance floor to retrieve my CD cases. To my surprise and amusement, the three cups of piss were nowhere to be found!

Later that week, I heard rumors that some freshmen were bitching about the warm Coors Light at our party that weekend.