Good judgement comes from experience

Oddly enough, I don’t find runners to be judgemental, the Wednesday Word for this week. You know who I do find to be judgemental? The non-runners!

I am a solid BOTP (back of the packer) to sometimes MOTP (middle of the pack), depending on the race and who shows up. My most recent race was a small race and I was definitely BOTP for that one.

There were still people at the finish line cheering me on. Darlene waited out in the cold to take my photo.No one was judging me, and everyone was encouraging.

Depend upon yourself. Make your judgement trustworthy by trusting it. You can develop good judgement as you do the muscles of your body — by judicious, daily exercise. To be known as a man of sound judgement will be much in your favor.
—Grantland Rice

Ah, but if I had a dime for every time anyone has told me I would ruin my knees by running (no one mentioned my ankles and shoulder!). It is the thing most non-runners associate with running: you will ruin your knees.

If I’d listened to the nay-sayers, I would have hung up my running shoes long ago, I would never have pushed through the aches to reach the highs of more PRs and just the highs from being able to run — there’s a lot of comfort in knowing I can run for miles, should the occasion ever arise where it’s actually necessary, not done for “fun”.

But back to all those judgemental non-runners.

They haven’t researched it, of course, and they don’t run. My mom was very firmly in that camp when I first started running. Of course eventually I did experience knee problems — and hip problems, and shoulder problems, and ankle problems. There is no doubt that running can be tough on your body, but as Mary Beth recently wrote, running never takes more than it gives back.

A funny thing happened as I kept running, though. Eventually the people around me saw that it was good for me, despite the minor injuries that I continue to battle.They stopped talking about ruining my knees, and just urged me to keep on running.

It’s easy to be judgemental — in fact, I’d go a step further and say being judgemental is the path of least resistance. Stretching yourself, educating yourself, willingness to take risks — these are all qualities most runners have in abundance and it serves us well in all areas of our lives.

It goes without saying that we runners, in turn, must learn to be less judgemental about the non-runners. Lead by example. They’ll come around — maybe they’ll never become runners, but they will see that running won’t, indeed, automatically ruin your knees and is, in the end, a good thing.

Oh for sure non-runners are judgemental about runners. But I’ve had the experience of runners being judgemental as well. I was actually going to write my post about that, that we are all on our own journey. I’ve gotten a lot of comments about my marathon training in the past. “What, no 20 mile run?” This time, comments about training through injury. Even tho I consulted a physician (sports med no less) and was told I could run through PF (which I would have done anyways). You know what they say, opinions are like a**holes. Everyone has one… :p

Like Judy, I have not encountered much judgement from runners, and, happily, luckily, and surprisingly, I have not from non-runners either. Once in a while I get a fleeting remark about the knee thing, but that is rare.

My personal experience has been that runners are supportive in the extreme. Those who have accomplished far more than I, multiple-marathoners and ultra marathoners, cheer my accomplishments where I am. It’s one of the great gifts of this sport. I’m never made to feel that with my lesser achievements I am less than they are.

I do think non runners can be judgemental and I agree that other runners can be judgemental as well. I believe some of them actually don’t realize they are doing it-I am giving them the benefit of the doubt. I wasn’t sure how to write about this one so I skipped it but good for you!

Most of my friends and family don’t really judge my running because I have been doing it most of my life. I ran track in middle school and high school and I took a break from it in college only to find running again in grad school. I think my family and friends really always defined me as a runner, so it was normal to them.

I find that the yoga community is a lot more judgmental. It makes me so sad, but I always see people judge others (and themselves) based on the poses that they can or cannot do. I’ve heard people say the most awful things about other people’s bodies in the name of “yoga”. I really hope the yoga community could take a page from the running community.

Judge not lest ye be judged. Words I try to live by. When I catch myself being judgmental of another person, I repeat this verse then try to promptly halt my judgemental thinking. Maybe I’m just forming an opinion, or maybe I’m actually being judgmental, I don’t know, but I sure seem to have a lot of opinions, :D. And I won’t talk to non-runners about my running or give them a chance to say something negative about it. I used to be a non-runner, so I know what it’s like to be on the other side, as do all of us, and I’m really just not that interested in hearing about their thoughts on my running, especially as it’s my journey, not theirs. Sorry, that came off a bit witchy, but it’s true. :D. Now, if they seem genuinely interested, then yes, I’ll chat with them about it, but not just for the sake of giving them an opening to speak badly of it.

But I also think when you make a choice to do something healthy, whether it’s running, other exercise, eating right, it is a challenge to those people who are choosing not to make a similar choice. In those cases, I think that judgment and naysaying comes out of a defensive urge.

Bottom line: you know what is right for you! Listen to your body and run with your heart. Let everyone else judge themselves!

I’ve had extended family and not-so-close friends question my running, but for the most part those closest to me have always supported me. My dad often questions a lot of the goals I chase and the different events I try (like Ragnar) but he rolls with it and always supports me. You make a good point about leading by example. I touched on that, too, with not referring to any challenge you’re taking on as a ‘just’ (i.e. I’m just running the 10K). When you devalue your race distance or whatever it is, it gives others the permission to do so, too.

It’s funny, unless I am around a runner I talk very little about running! I think it’s because I don’t want to be judged and hear a lot of misinformed blabber. Those stories — “Al was a runner all of his life and now his knees and hips are ruined and he’s had multiple surgeries.” Hey — Al is 90. He’d need surgery anyway! {eye roll as I judge the story teller}