I am paranoid about bad breath, esp since a former BF used to tell me mine was horrendus all the time. So I always have mints or gum. And if I take one out for myself, I always offer to anyone around me, but have been asked more than once "why, is my breath bad?" Um, no, I just didnt' want to be rude!

Another thread reminded me of greeting card etiquette that verged on the absurd.

There was a sept of the family that was very, very touchy about the imagery on Birthday cards.

If you sent a card with an image of puppies that meant you thought the recipient was a dog.

If you send a card with a kitten, that meant you thought the recipient was sly.

The deity forbid that you thought a card with an image of a skunk smelling a rose was cute.

For that part of the family, the only safe image was one of flowers. Even then, that didn't always work. Not being completely versed in the language of flowers, I was a bit nonplussed when a cousin remarked that my card with an image of yellow roses wasn't appropriate.

Oh dear, I didn't realise you were related to my DH...

His brother got married in January (many years ago), and this naturally made it a little trickier to get flowers for the corsages than it would have been for a June wedding. When MIL told him she would be wearing purple, the only thing the florist could find to go with it was a very striking arrangement featuring a large purple thistle.

This did not go down well. Apparently, if you give someone a thistle to wear at a wedding, you are saying that they are a terrible, awful person who probably kicks puppies, and that you hate the very sight of them and wish that they would get hit by a meteorite.

Poor BIL. The sniffs and tutting from MIL and her other relatives were audible all through the wedding... (Added to that, the bride had the audacity to wear a very dark green dress, and when she entered the church there were shocked exclamations of 'She's wearing black!')

Logged

When you look into the photocopier, the photocopier also looks into you

That's like giving someone some nice soap and being asked if you're giving it because they smell. No, you don't smell, it's nice soap, just enjoy it. Stop being a idiot.

Ther is a story about the late Princess Grace of Monaco. She and Prince Rainier gave their staff a Christmas stocking each year. The Princess had found some novelty soaps shaped like animals, and put them in the stockings. One girl burst into tears on opening hers, as she was convinced that their Serene Hgihnesses were commenting on her personal hygiene