3 peers behind the curtains face Bailiffs

Three peers are facing suspension from the House of Lords, for wrongly claimed expenses.
Peering from behind their curtains, despite being in hiding in their homes, as bailiffs swooped on all three of them, the three peers were spotted by media reporters, who had a field day, reporting on their embarrassing plight.

Baroness Bangles Udder, 51, was besieged by bailiffs, for £127,000 worth of belongings, in lieu of her expenses debt, following being found out for 'milking the system', and in front of bemused neighbours, she had to contend with her belongings being removed from her housing association home, in Whooping, East London.

Bailiffs removed:

100 gold plated woks,
50 dustbins full of luxury curry powder imported from a top Indian Grocers in Delhi,
500 Sari's stitched with real gold thread,
400 Turbans also stitched with real gold thread,
6 Gold plated Chipatti pans,
6 arm full's of Gold plated Asiatic bangles,
and the gold plated keys to her Bangladeshi mansion
not to mention the keys to her 2 bedroom Maidstone, Kent Flat
in which claimed to live, in order to falsely claim travel expenses, for flying by carpet, to London, and maintaining a landing pad, for the said, magic carpet.

Baroness Bangles Udder, threatened the bailiffs with spells, and hexes, if they removed anymore, they took no notice.

Lord Batty, a wealthy businessman, and Chairman of Oxfam Trading, which is a charity, is another peer, who was caught peering from behind his curtains, of his 1.5 million pound home, in South West London, as bailiffs descended upon him this morning, in front of his neighbours, in a bid to seize £27,000 worth, of falsely claimed expenses.

As with the other 2 peers, Lord Batty had claimed to live in a small flat, in Reigate in Surrey, which turned out to be owned by his brother.

Bailiffs rammed the door, since he refused to open it, and seized:

600 Oxfam suits,
300 Oxfam shirts with gold buttons,
400 Oxfam ties,
90 pairs of Oxfam shoes with gold laces,
60 gold thread stitched turbans,
50 gold plated curry bowls,
the keys to his Nissan Sunny van,
the keys to his flat in Reigate in which he claims to live in but doesn't,
and his wallet containing 60 British rail train passes and 300,000 Rupees.

He was left in his nightshirt on the doorstep, minus a suit to wear for work, whilst blushing badly, though the crowds mistook his complexion, for an enhanced suntan, which spared him some embarrassment, at least.

Lord Rob Peter-to-pay-Paul, was the 3rd peer, caught trying to hide behind the curtains, in his apartment door today, when bailiffs descended on his home, a plush London apartment block, opposite the BBC headquarters, in Portland Place, London, close to where he owns 14 million pounds worth of property, despite having claimed to live in a small one bedroom flat, in Oxfordshire, which turned out to be owned by one of his employees.

Bailiffs broke down the door, at Lord Rob Peter-to-pay-Paul's London apartment, in order to seize £38,000 worth, of falsely claimed expenses, which he refused to give them, and so bailiffs removed some of his belongings instead, which included:

500 steel buckets (which his father had sent him, from the families Punjab foundry),
6 tigers wearing 22ct gold collars, which he was given as a gift, by the Zoological Society of London,
the keys to his country mansion in Beaconsfield, Buckinghamshire,
not to mention, his set of 22ct gold plated dentures and matching denture mug
and finally, a photo of him with Uncle 'Fester' , out of the Addams family, whom he resembles greatly.

Lord Rob Peter-to-pay-Paul, was left 'festering' on how he could best, he could rob Peter to pay Paul, whilst sitting cross legged, on the doorstep of his formerly plush flat, very like a Buddha in meditation.

There is to be a government auction, to sell the seized goods, taken from the homes of the three peers, in order to covert the seized goods, into the lost government revenue.
No one is expected to attend, as everyone in the UK, is now financially stretched, following the extensive and harsh government spending cuts.

The three peers are thought to be planning, to dine in the soup kitchen, for the homeless and poor, in London's fashionable Brixton tonight, if no one on the door recognizes them, that is.

More news later, watch this space, minus people peering from behind Indian curtains.