How To Keep Your Relationship Alive

posted 20 Dec 2010, 05:38 by Sam Mbale
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updated 20 Dec 2010, 05:39
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Many couples make the mistake of thinking that how to keep arelationship alive is with grand gestures such as weekendsaway, expensive dinners out, far flung holidays or lavishgifts. All of these are short-term fixes and may not bepossible if you have children or can't afford to splash outin this way. The best way to keep a relationship strong isto get back to basics.

The "Big C".Connection is the vital part of a relationship and attractsus to someone in the first place, without connection, thereare no sparks. Many people confuse connection with sexualattraction. Connection is what makes you feel close andintimate with your partner. It is the oil that keeps arelationship lubricated; it prevents relationships frombreaking because of petty arguments and helps couples toaccept each others' weaknesses.

What men need to feel connected.Men need the two A's - Acknowledgement and Appreciation.They don't necessarily ask for these but really do needthem. Men need to be acknowledged for their practicalaccomplishments such as, fixing things and solving problems.It is important to appreciate men for every day things suchas taking out the rubbish and for the manly things they dorather than berate them for the feminine things they don'tdo such as show their feelings or chat for hours.

What women need to feel connected.Women need the two C's - to be Cherished and Complimented. Away to a woman's heart is through her ears. It is vital thata woman regularly hears how much she is loved, how great shelooks and what a wonderful mother and great lover she is. Shewill feel more connected when she is regularly complimented,and this in turn, will keep a relationship alive. Women alsoneed to feel cherished, this means feeling special andadored. Men can do this with thoughtful texts and emails,flowers or an act of service such as cooking her a specialmeal.

Acknowledging and appreciating a man in a relationship andcherishing and complimenting a woman in a relationship willbuild fundamental connection and it will be much easier tokeep the relationship going and sparks flying.

Keeping sparks flying.When I think of spark, I think of that chemistry andelectricity you feel at the beginning of a relationship thatsends shivers down your spine, which makes you pine for yourpartner when you are away from them, that makes you want totalk and think about them relentlessly and ravish them atthe slightest opportunity. Obviously, these behaviours arenot sustainable because we need time for other things in ourlife like work, children, friends, family and otherinterests, but rekindling some of that spark as ourrelationship progresses makes us feel excited, loved, stopsus from getting complacent and being unfaithful. Once you'vebuilt your foundation by acknowledging and appreciating andcherishing and complementing, here are some more ways tokeep a relationship alive:

Indulge a woman in emotion.The best way to get close to a woman is by showing heremotion, this can be by expresing love to her through wordsor gestures such as a foot massage.

Let a man be free.Men love to do their own thing and have their own space andif, as a woman, you give them their freedom, they will comerunning back to you with increased passion and love.

Spend quality time together.But, you can give each other too much freedom so make surethat you spend quality time together without the distractionof the TV, household chores or children.

Remember the good times.Sharing memories of when you first met, when you got marriedor any other significant moment in your relationship canrekindle the happiness you experienced and help to build acloser connection.

Spice up your sex life.If your love-making becomes routine, try different places,positions, times of the day, sharing fantasies and a bit ofrole play.

About the Author:

Candy Jannetta is a UK based Relationship Coach and authorwho has helped dozens of single men and women to find truelove. Want help in meeting your perfect match? Sign up for aFREE 7-day e-course on how to meet that special someone athttp://www.howtomeetyourperfectmatch.com