A Hand, Not a Handout

President Bush has called on Americans to reach out and help others. Here's an Israeli who sets a good example.

JERUSALEM -- The events of the last year and a half have given new poignancy to the Talmud's contention that the Holy Land is something acquired through hardship. The almost daily terrorist incidents have added an extra edge to the already mind-numbing procedures of navigating governmental bureaucracies and staying afloat during the current economic times. It seems that almost everyone here in Israel needs a helping hand these days.

In the midst of this ongoing turmoil, David Morris is seeking to improve the lives of his fellow Jews with the innovative concept of chesed (kindness) networks. Instead of simply helping people through rough times with handouts, Morris utilizes the talents of a broad cadre of community members to help those in need get back on their feet. The Torah, he notes, considers helping someone become self-sufficient to be the highest form of giving.

Providing money for food is only a partial response; we aim to help at as many levels as possible.

"People don't open their fridge one day and discover it empty. Sad situations occur over time and within a context," Morris says. "Providing money for food is only a partial response; we aim to help at as many levels as possible."

Morris has already founded two organizations with his "network" concept. The first, Yad Leyadid ("A Hand For A Friend") began six years ago in Jerusalem. The second, Lema'an Achai ("For My Brothers' Sake") was started when Morris moved to the new religious suburb of Ramat Bet Shemesh two years ago.

BEYOND WALLETS

Morris, a British immigrant, has a day job as a marketer of electro-optics; he moonlights as a chesed powerhouse. Chesed, he says, is the "family business." His mother won an award from Queen Elizabeth for a similar charity organization she began in England's Harrogate community many years ago.

Morris started his first organization after witnessing debt collectors loading his neighbor's belongings onto a truck. He soon realized his neighbor was far from alone; such repossessions are practically mundane occurrences in contemporary Israel. "People literally run out of food here," he explains. "The welfare system only catches the bottom few percent, so many, many others fall through the cracks."

The welfare system only catches the bottom few percent. Many others fall through the cracks.

By matching experts who offer their time gratis or at vastly discounted rates with those in need, Lema'an Achai turns conventional charity into what Morris calls "smart" chesed. Rashie Reichert, who volunteers for Lema'an Achai, said that people "look at themselves differently when they're not just opening their wallets, but are utilizing their strengths to help others who can't do these things for themselves."

Morris explains that poverty can often stem from seemingly simple problems with debts or mortgages. When these problems escalate, people need lawyers to help them deal with the sometimes exasperating Israeli system. "In Israel you can get taken to bankruptcy court, and be evicted or arrested for bouncing a small check," Morris says, "There are defenses to help people who deserve mercy."

In other cases, families need therapists to sort out family issues. "If one pillar collapses the whole family can tumble," Morris points out.

SAFETY NET

Lema'an Achai utilizes the services of more than 100 volunteers who assist the 150 families in need in Ramat Bet Shemesh. It sponsors free dental clinics and a network of doctors and medical professionals who guide the seriously ill through the medical system. The group also offers professional care such as legal and financial consulting, social services, therapy and tutors. They have arranged for grocery stores to provide free food, discounts and deliveries to those living below the poverty line.

Recently the high-tech meltdown has caused even more people to call on the services of Lema'an Achai. Families that once were donors are now among the recipients. A Lema'an Achai social worker recently visited a once comfortable family who finally decided to call after the children squabbled over the last slice of bread in the refrigerator. "Helping people who don't have what to put on their table is becoming a more common problem in Israel," Morris says.

We do our share, but we also see God's help in a very direct way.

Along with providing a financial safety net for families, the "chesed networks" also help protect children within the social welfare system. One parent in Ramat Bet Shemesh who was provided with lawyers, rabbinic court advisors, social workers, therapists and cash during a difficult period considers Lema'an Achai "part of the family" for having helped salvage it from dissolution.

David Morris says that he has been fortunate through his work in Lema'an Achai to witness several such success stories. "We do our share," he says, "but we also see God's help in a very direct and visible way." Many times, Lema'an Achai has been close to bankruptcy itself when a sudden large contribution is received which tides them over for the next month. Once a Russian immigrant family called in desperate need of a refrigerator; the next phone call was from a family that was moving and who wanted to donate a refrigerator.

"We are often reminded," Morris says, "that we are in a holy business here."

I've been striving to get more into spirituality. But it seems that every time I make some progress, I find myself slipping right back to where I started. I'm getting discouraged and feel like a failure. Can you help?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Spiritual slumps are a natural part of spiritual growth. There is a cycle that people go through when at times they feel closer to God and at times more distant. In the words of the Kabbalists, it is "two steps forward and one step back." So although you feel you are slipping, know that this is a natural process. The main thing is to look at your overall progress (over months or years) and be able to see how far you've come!

This is actually God's ingenious way of motivating us further. The sages compare this to teaching a baby how to walk. When the parent is holding on, the baby shrieks with delight and is under the illusion that he knows how to walk. Yet suddenly, when the parent lets go, the child panics, wobbles and may even fall.

At such times when we feel spiritually "down," that is often because God is letting go, giving us the great gift of independence. In some ways, these are the times when we can actually grow the most. For if we can move ourselves just a little bit forward, we truly acquire a level of sanctity that is ours forever.

Here is a practical tool to help pull you out of the doldrums. The Sefer HaChinuch speaks about a great principle in spiritual growth: "The external awakens the internal." This means that although we may not experience immediate feelings of closeness to God, eventually, by continuing to conduct ourselves in such a manner, this physical behavior will have an impact on our spiritual selves and will help us succeed. (A similar idea is discussed by psychologists who say: "Smile and you will feel happy.")

That is the power of Torah commandments. Even if we may not feel like giving charity or praying at this particular moment, by having a "mitzvah" obligation to do so, we are in a framework to become inspired. At that point we can infuse that act of charity or prayer with all the meaning and lift it can provide. But if we'd wait until being inspired, we might be waiting a very long time.

May the Almighty bless you with the clarity to see your progress, and may you do so with joy.

In 1940, a boatload 1,600 Jewish immigrants fleeing Hitler's ovens was denied entry into the port of Haifa; the British deported them to the island of Mauritius. At the time, the British had acceded to Arab demands and restricted Jewish immigration into Palestine. The urgent plight of European Jewry generated an "illegal" immigration movement, but the British were vigilant in denying entry. Some ships, such as the Struma, sunk and their hundreds of passengers killed.

If you seize too much, you are left with nothing. If you take less, you may retain it (Rosh Hashanah 4b).

Sometimes our appetites are insatiable; more accurately, we act as though they were insatiable. The Midrash states that a person may never be satisfied. "If he has one hundred, he wants two hundred. If he gets two hundred, he wants four hundred" (Koheles Rabbah 1:34). How often have we seen people whose insatiable desire for material wealth resulted in their losing everything, much like the gambler whose constant urge to win results in total loss.

People's bodies are finite, and their actual needs are limited. The endless pursuit for more wealth than they can use is nothing more than an elusive belief that they can live forever (Psalms 49:10).

The one part of us which is indeed infinite is our neshamah (soul), which, being of Divine origin, can crave and achieve infinity and eternity, and such craving is characteristic of spiritual growth.

How strange that we tend to give the body much more than it can possibly handle, and the neshamah so much less than it needs!