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Old White Male Alumni Really Timed Their Return to Campus Poorly This Year

“Yeah, I could kind of do without this right now,” commented Angela Town ’18 on Saturday after listening to William Humbart Class of 1965 sing the Lord Jeff song and describe the “Great Old Days of Amherst.”

“Like I’m all about community and everything, but this guy isn’t really helping my current state of mind,” elaborated Town while trying to enjoy one of America’s favorite pastimes.