A Rant inspired by Pandora and Every Café’s lazy love for Bob Dylan.

Bob Dylan has a unique voice. So what. My grandma has a (very) unique voice.

Bob Dylan has—well, had—amazing lyrics. Bob Dylan was cool, back in the day. Now he fronts legitimately cool bands at the Grammys. That was nice of him—a pass-the-baton kinda moment. Now pass that baton, and don’t ask for it back:

He was his own man back in the day, sure, with his baby face and cool dark glasses and wild happy hair and funny way of walking around being mopey and interesting.

But Bob Dylan is just irritating, now. And, worse, he’s mediocre:

Bob Dylan back in the day was the only folk-er to ignore Civil Rights and Vietnam. He never bothered to pick his alt self up off the couch and do anything for the greater good. He was too cool for that.

My dis-ease with Bob Dylan stems from the fact that his worbly horribly wobbling voice is overplayed at cafés nationally—I’ve made an inadvertent study of this and can say that he’s outlasted other ubiquitous safe-yet-alt go-tos such as Postal Service or Regina wassername or whomever got famous off the last Apple ad or Norah Jones and Buena Vista Social Club and even Miles Davis.

But Dylan? He makes ubiquitous look precious.

One time, years ago, without premeditation, I had a temper tantrum and had to leave a cafe when I heard his annoying drawling voice come on. For the 20th time that week.

Yes, literally.

Yes, at moments like that, I wish I had my own office so I could overplay Mumford & Sons or whomever I’m spazzing out on this week.

Yes, I love some of his early stuff.

But I’d take any other strange-voiced whackjob over BD—gimme a young Neil, er, Young (who bothered to care about, yah, Vietnam and Farm Aid and the Iraq Wars) or Johnny Cash any day.

I'm sure you can get your bucks worth over the course of this month with other great authors on this site. Sorry you suffer from an intolerance for folks who have other opinions than yours–I love Bob Dylan, I just mainly hate hearing him overplayed allllll the time. Thanks, anonymous name-called.

You also apparently don't understand his voice. I interviewed Iggy Pop once, and we got on the topic of Dylan. He hit the nail on the head when he said that the vocal technique is really more like Frank Sinatra than anyone else. The dude wanted to be Elvis, but ended up doing something far more interesting.

Look, Dylan was writing songs for about year before he ever even noticed Guthrie. His writing in his teens was influenced by a number of genres. Guess who was quite prevalent between 1956 and 1958 when Dylan was in his midteens? Elvis. He compared his first listening to Elvis at that time as "busting out of jail." He fucking loved him. The problem with this for those who wanted to manipulate them for their causes was that Elvis was a raging racist. Thus it was far more appealing to focus one of Dylan's other idols– Guthrie.

Dylan was interested in *everything* Alan Lomax shined a litght on, incidentally, not just Woody Guthrie.

In any case, he was quite a keen musicologist. You might actually figure out a way to appreciate him as more than "that guy who failed to use his fame for civil rights the way I think he should," if you learned a bit yourself.

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Ashoka: i have gone through phases similar to this but never was i foolish enough to commit them on paper. erase this now for your own good

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Tara
Really, Irritating and Annoying are the poll options? How about adore, respect and find amusing. If not for Bob, art as we know it today would not be the same, and the artists you would rather be listening to, well there would have been n…o roads for them to travel had Bob not blazed them first. Hate is a strong word. Bob is irritating, often unintelligible and frequently absurd, but a genius who just never gave a F#%$. Still doesn't. [That Christmas album – that was a monumental fail.] PS I agree with Ashoka, you are asking for it. Is that on purpose? : )

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Waylon Lewis Amen, Tara? He chose not to help Civil Rights out with his considerable fame, and I said nice things about his songs, and he kinda sucks these days, and the article is more about how he's so overplayed. You can add your own opinion of him in comments, there'll be plenty of 'em. It's all a bit tongue-in-cheek, of course, he's a sacred musical cow (Ashoooka).

As for hate being a strong word, yes this is all rather colloquial, and we all say we hate stuff all day every day. Don't you hate that?

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elephantjournal.com Sandra, it's meant pretty tongue-in-cheek. Just 'cause we spiritual do-gooder organic vegan yoga-lovin' types have a weak funny bone don't mean we shouldn't exercise. Being overly self-serious all the time is bad for your health; take it from me. ~ Waylon

Tom Waits. My favorite cafe here in Chico, CA plays Tom Waits a lot – and no Bob Dylan. Thankfully they allow the baristas to choose whatever music is on, typically from their own mp3 players. No pre-arranged satellite "coffee house" music determined to be such by some music executive in a high rise corner office who's never even been to an actual, original, non mass-produced coffee house.

Not that I (always) gauge the merit or talent of a band by what the tyrants of the indie world (Also known as Pitchfork) say, but in the case of Mumford & Sons, they are dead on. But really, who am I to judge? I am still listening to Wolf Parade, and all cool hipster cafes and stores removed those wildly talented Canadians from rotation in '08. Sigh….

I challenge anyone to watch the (Scorcese) movie “No Direction Home”, especially the scene of the press conference (“How Many Other Folk Singers…?”) and the scene where the two young girls ask him for his autograph (“you don’t need it. If you needed it, I’d give it you”) and come away without a deep respect for the young BD.

His voice was amazing. He sang as if he didn’t give a shit at a time when you were meant to.

He was so far ahead of his time… and he did support the civil rights movements, he just didn’t do things the way other people wanted. All power to him.

I don’t know jack about Dylan these days, and I don’t care. Maybe he lost it, I don’t know. But the man who sang “When you aint got nothing, you got nothing to lose” like he knew what it meant was a total genius.

Watch the movie. It’s fantastic.
And stop hanging out in cafe’s so much. It’s bad for your health.

I posted this on Waylon's FB link. My fellow-boomer's worship of Dylan got very old like several decades ago. Here's my 50 cents.

Dylan lost his muse around the time of his motorcycle accident. His last album was Blonde on Blonde. After that it was Bob Zimmerman pretending to be Dylan. You want to see the real Dylan in all his glory and nastiness see Don't Look Back at your video store. It's a landmark piece of film-making (Dylan or not) that documents his first England tour (by himself on stage all acoustic).

Actually, it was somewhat gradual — the album right after his accident, John Wesley Harding, (with All Along the Watchtower) he was floating to earth. Nashville Skyline is "Howdy — Bobby Zimmerman here!. That run up to fame sure was exciting. Gonna has some fun down here in Nashville." Then a few years later he started selling the snake-oil we have today. Well, really, he always was a glorified bullshit artist — just a lot more creative in the early days.

Man, you guys have no idea what you're talking about. Waylon get out of boulder and away from those hipster d-bags and you'll hear different music. And the guy that thinks Nashville Skyline had anything to do with actually liking Nashville or the culture is also an idiot. It was a play on the sound but that band that was behind him that you folkies just love to hate was the Band. Dylan in his early days was great. Dylan with the Band was great. Dylan live today is great.

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Waylon Lewis Ashoka, I think you're right: I'm in for a beating on this one. Well deserved, I'm sure.

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Ashoka Mukpo well yeah and then a week from now "pity the immigrant" or some such will come on the radio and youll feel real bad about yourself. think of me like an old man trying to convince you not to join the army

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Waylon Lewis Ashoka now if you wrote that as a blog title "Bono sucks no matter how much aids he cures" it would even be more popular, less well-received (and equally true) as my Dylan Pandora rant.

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Gayle: And then there's Sting.

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Tara: As a bit of a Bob-ologist, I know all the Bob rhetoric – and I've heard his reasons for "abandoning' the civil rights and folk movements – because he felt he was being used as a tool. Maybe not the PC move. I guess you just love him or hate him but I always admire him for making the choices that made sense to him. They never made much sense to anyone else. His music does kinda suck these days – but the dude is almost 70 – what do you want? Will make more comments on ele.

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Waylon Lewis Tara, I'd love to know more about that. Seems kinda inconceivable not to support MLK, fight Vietnam…it's like missing the greatest wave in a surfer's career 'cause you feel used by the ocean, it's too obviously surfable…

Chuck S: I've met people who hate The Beatles, Allen Ginsberg, Rembrandt, and Orson Welles. And now this…

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Liz L: They're insane. The same people hate chocolate and cats. Irrational…

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Zane E: Sorry, I just don't like Bob or the Beatles. It's just kinda clichéd music that supposedly everyone just HAS to like or they are evil lesser beings. There is so much more in the world to appreciate musically. Thankfully, The Band was wonderful.

Here's the real prob. You're from the wrong generation. Dylan and the Beatles are a part of my history. They're tattooed on my heart. You youngsters!

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Liz L: so's the Band, BTW….

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Erika Anderson sorry, but i love bob dylan- he is a beauty.

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Linda Sparrowe i just think Bob Dylan's become a bit of an anachronism. He was indeed a powerful, necessary voice for an entire generation, but he hasn't had much to say in ages, and when he's chosen to speak he hasn't been very conscious. Who is that voice now? I hope it's not just Bono–he's so tiresome and predictable.

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Tara: Dylan & the Band were a single organism much of the time. And Waylon, I'll lend you No Direction Home sometime ( didn't someone already dis that ) and you can see Bob right behind MLK @ steps of Lincoln memorial – and singing from the back of flatbeds W Guthry style at voter registration rallies in early 60's South. Then he saw others had it covered and he needed to find out what his truth was. That's how I've seen it.

We need a unified voice for the 21 st C. Ben Harper is on my ballot. The big voice is out there- hopefully a chorus.

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Jay Winston And, by the way, I did not read the article, nor will I add to the hit count of any article with such a silly title.

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Heart Yoga I have to admit…I really don't like bob Dylan's music. I have tried it, listened to it, it's on one of my favourite soundtracks…but his voice is irritating and annoying. It grates through my ears. Give me Eddie Vedder any day 😀

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Gesar Mukpo I ate a sandwich.

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Michael T: Dylan lost his muse around the time of his motorcycle accident. His last album was Blonde on Blonde. After that it was Bob Zimmerman pretending to be Dylan. You want to see the real Dylan in all his glory and nastiness see Don't Look Back at your video store. It's a landmark piece of film-making (Dylan or not) that documents his first England tour (by himself on stage all acoustic).

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Liz L Jaded babies…

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Michael T Actually, it was somewhat gradual — the album right after his accident (with All Along the Watchtower) he was floating to earth. Nashville Skyline is "Howdy — Bobby Zimmerman here!. That run up to fame sure was exciting. Gonna has some fun down here in Nashville." Then a few years later he started selling the snake-oil we have today. Well, really, he always was a glorified bullshit artist — just a lot more creative in the early days.

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Tara: ‎@Michael – I think he called it "moving and faking" – aka bullshitting while not standing still. I agree- after 66+ two years of being boo'ed and a really messed up marriage made fall to earth- and a song or two to pluck of an album here & there. He fell hard but gave us a lot to think about for decades (if you are the type who can handle listening.)

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Tara: PS thanks Way – this has turned into a great discussion.

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Gayle
You go Liz!!! Bob Dylan may not have lent his name to any movements. I believe he once said "I don't write protest songs." I am down with that. He just wrote great, powerful, songs that were sometimes indictments of the powers that be. … He may not have been marching, but we sure were marching to his music. I can't stand listening to a lot of music that I feel has been overplayed including Bruce Springsteen, the Beatles, much of the Rolling Stones and Prince. If I never hear Joan Baez vibrate through another song it will be too soon. But Joni, anywhere, anyplace, anytime. Except, of course, for Chelsea Morning.
Pandora blows. Try creating a playlist from "Fela Kuti," "Kanda Bongo Man", or "King Sunny Ade." Pandora doesn't even know who they are.
As a former FM DJ I gotta say, where are the great DJ's today? They've been replaced by computers. You can use any algorithm you want to create a playlist…but we all need good guides along the musical path and Pandora ain't it.
Anybody watch Watson the computer play Jeopardy? Boring…so there's my rant for the day.
Now I'm gonna listen to some Girltalk!

Cafes and bookstores love to play safe-yet-alt music. Bob Dylan is their timeless favorite. Thus beginneth a Pandora Rant:

Sandra B That's one mean-spirited essay.

Heather M: I love Bob Dylan. Seen him 7 times in concert since 99'. Will continue to see him live til he quits touring or I'm dead. Whatever comes first. …
But you are entitled to your opinion too. Peace out, Rock On.

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elephantjournal.com Sandra, it's meant pretty tongue-in-cheek. Just 'cause we spiritual do-gooder organic vegan yoga-lovin' types have a weak funny bone don't mean we shouldn't exercise. Being overly self-serious all the time is bad for your health; take it from me.

Thanks, Heather. I do love some of his songs, I embedded a few in the blog above. The blog is really more about how cafes and bookstores etc. love to beat good tunes to death.

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Joe Yeoman
Tongue and cheek or not—-I think Dylan wore out his welcome 20 years ago, along with the Rolling Stones, Ozzy, and several other bands.

"But Bob Dylan is just irritating, now. And, worse, he’s mediocre"

I agree. People that still love him …need to listen to his Christmas album. It's awful. Like listening to the drunk aunt, who smokes too much, try to sing to Bing Crosby after a third margarita.

He needed to step out of the light in the 90s. Now he risks tarnishing the earlier Bob Dylan, the Bob I love.

I intend to be mean spirited. Grandpa Bob Dylan–with his millions and mansion–is killing Rebel Bob Dylan–the one who played rock when people wanted folk and folk when people wanted rock. Eventually one Bob is going to die–and for me, I don't want it to be the one that changed music, compared to the one who's just riding along on a fading name.

Sandra B I've got as good a sense of humour as any, and then some, guess I missed it in this article. Looking forward to the next one, on Enya. Peace out.

Bret B I love dylan, He is amazing, Even though Listening to him makes me want to smoke cigarettes and drink bourbon. However,I have seen Him in concert twice, and we all know(those who have seen him recently) how painful that is.

Marja H: Dylan passing that baton to the Avett Brothers made my Sunday.

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Arvin V
I have not listened to the christmas album in it's entirety, but i think that at his age and considering his impressive body of work, Bob has the right to just have some fun with music, and say fuck you to all the people that thinks they ha…ve the right to decide what he should sound like and what type of music he should perform.Which is what i think the christmas album is about, good clean fun. It's not meant to be taking seriously- His music is first and foremost his own, he has never asked for your support or for you to like what he's doing. Dylan doesn't owe you anything. If you don't like the new stuff, the old stuff is still there for your pleasure. It will only be tarnished if you let it. Besides he is still a rebel, he just doesn't rebel the way you want him to Joe. Think about it. The guy releases a CHRISTMAS ALBUM. What else could be more in your face from a guy like Dylan? "Oh you say you want some folk protest songs or some rock stuff like the old days, or perhaps some rootsy stuff like my last few records, well i ain't gonna give it to you!" Finally, i saw him live touring Modern Times a couple of years back and he blew everybody away, fantastic performance and one of the most beautiful things i've ever witnessed in my (albeit short, i admit) life.
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Lewis D
I guess Waylon Lewis never heard "Blowin' In the Wind," presumably because he left the room in torment and anger every time it played, which was often. It reminds me of how we are tormented by our hatred and rewarded by our love.

Dylan had ……many other songs protesting the war, as well. They include "Masters of War", "John Brown", and "Talking John Birch Paranoid Blues," just to name a few off the top of my head. In the article, The Reality of War: Dylan and the Dharma, the reprinted lyrics to "John Brown" clearly show Dylan "getting his alt. self off the couch"and protesting the war. http://www.artofdharma.org/archives/the-reality-o… More

Susan H: ‎@ EJ – why is it that when judgmental vitriol is not considered funny, it's a sense of humor failure on the part of the readership? How does an immature rant benefit the readership?

Ben Ralston: No. Just no. Sorry, but… no. Young Dylan was a beautiful genius way ahead of his time. Maybe even a prophet. Watch "No Direction Home" if you don't believe me. What do you all think? (intro+link via Ben Ralston (Wrongful article by Way (I think he had one too many coffees)

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Colin: No one has mentioned that he wrote much of the music for the Beatles.

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Kamaniya: He did?! I had no idea!

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Diane: Bob Dylan has inspired me beyond belief. I wrote my first one act play about him, I've believed and loved his words, and treasured his actions. Bob Dylan his made a permanent engravement on my heart… Without protest. Without protest.

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elephantjournal.com I hear you Diane! ~ Ben R

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Diane C Thanks Ben (with tears in my eyes) thank you.

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Lance A: When someone doesn't "get" Dylan it usually says much more about them than it says about Bob himself. The author seems to have missed the historic context of the Grammy performance of "Maggie's Farm" which Dylan performed 45 years ago at the Newport Folk Festival when he "went electric" and changed Rock n Roll forever. Now Dylan used the same song to embrace roots/acoustic music.

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Ron J: What a puerile little piece. Dylan now is not Dylan then, but it's all Dylan. Perhaps after the writer has gone through a few more changes he'll get it.

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elephantjournal.com I was a high school folk singer when Bob Dylan went electric, and boy was I mad. Total sell-out to rock commercialism! (I managed to get over it.) –Bob W.

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Erin J: Haters gonna hate.

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Terry B: Life's to short get over it. Maybe I should have said he not busy being born is busy dieing

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elephantjournal.com Amazing how strongly people react to this. I was taking the piss with my intro (well, a bit anyway)… love Bob or hate him, it's just a musical opinion eh? ~ BenR

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Julia:
Bob Dylan without historical context can only disappoint. His appearance on the Grammys would lead one to think he was nothing more than a talentless hack. The venue surely only proved his historical reluctance to perform there correct. I v…iew BD as a poet and his voice worked well with poetry. Like Guthrie he told the stories that reflected a reality conspicuosly absent from the commercial media of it's day. Great balladers are not known for the musical quality of their voice as much as they are known for the effect their ballads have on shaping history.

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Julia: may I add, texting comments from a cell phone is a wee bit of a challenge!

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elephantjournal.com Seems like most didn't read my article, given the for or against intro. My article is, at least partly, about how Pandora sucks and cafes and bookstores beat good songs to death…Dylan being first among 'em. ~ Waylon

I just watched the first video posted here, the Victoria Secret Ad. I do not see a sell out, I see Dylan throwing down his hat at what society/marketing has become. This is what you want from me, this is what you think I meant, take it, the book has already been written, hopefully someday you will read it, there is nothing more I can say. The last line, "I'd give anything to be with you", means nothing that Victoria Secret wants it to mean, it means I wish I had the youth and energy to influence you again. Dylan is a clear reflection, that was always his brilliance. And his beauty is now more than ever in the eyes and ears of the beholder.

This made me sad. The snide mean-spirited judgements against another human being for choices he makes in his life and art, for the sound of his voice ("worbly horribly wobbling," "annoying drawling" really? But then you claim to "love" him.. huh?), and the fact that cafes play his music too much for your taste (you seriously had a temper tantrum for this reason? Maybe some breathing exercises will help, I dunno.) are not what I expected to read on your site. All this followed by the insulting responses to those who cared to comment and the assumption that most didn't even read the article because they don't agree with the negative spirit in which this article was written. Be careful with your art, Waylon.. some might feel you're not using it the way you should. Yeah, I definitely wish I hadn't read this.

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Really, if you don’t like something, just move on. Why devote time & effort to writing and posting about something you hate? And that’s mindful and Buddhist? ??? I’m listening to Bob Dylan RIGHT NOW (“If You See Her Say Hello”) and listen to him every day. My response to your lazy essay, which really just amounts to, “I don’t like Bob Dylan WHINE WHINE WHINE” is to quote the OTHER Elvis: I can’t find the exact quote, but Elvis Costello once said something like, “You are entitled to your opinion that Bob Dylan isn’t any good. Of course, your opinion would be WRONG.”

I know this is an old article but I needed to say how ignorant I find it, and it should be taken down. For me, it effects the theme of this site. Usually I really like elephant journal, but this is just rude. If I wanted to read petty opinions, I would read Star magazine.
Bob Dylan was and will always be a great icon in music as well as in art for his poetic lyrics. You use his Christmas album to prove the point that he is mediocre now, but what you didn't say was how all money he makes off of that album goes straight to charity- meaning every Christmas people will be helped thanks to him. And so what if he's done a few commercials? He's a famous icon, he can do what he wants. Honestly, I get excited when I hear a Bob Dylan song playing at a coffee shop, or a department store, or whereever,. Just tells me whoever is in charge of the play list has good taste in music and knows art when they hear it. Come on, I'm 25 and love Bob Dylan.