Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Marion Delgado has some important updates on the Rachel Carson Death Toll, originally placed as a comment in Eli's memorium, the Bunnies in the Snark Room have moved it to this more appropriate place:

The Rachel Carson Death Toll

1913: 6 year old rachel carson wins an essay contest "why little disease bugs have mommies and need a break! Let's not be mean" The essay is reprinted nationwide and president Wilson decides not to fight or quarantine the Spanish influenza:

RESULT: Tens of millions of deaths. Rachel gets a new bicycle.

1917 - 10 year old Rachel Carson sends a letter to the Finnish King suggesting he allow a sealed railroad car bearing Vladimir Ilich Lenin, Communist Butcher, to travel through the nation because "scientists like me know sharing is nice." The Finns mistakenly listen.

RESULT: 100 million deaths in Russia, 200 million in china, another 100 million in vietnam, cambodia, and cuba. Rachel Carson becomes the first American to win a Red Star Bolshevik Anti-American Jesus-Killing Order of Merit First Class. She and her family move to a dacha on the Black Sea.

1935 animal behaviorathiest Rachel Carson sends fan mail to Neville Chamberlin "Dear Mr. Prime Minister: I think appeasement is sexy, and its the way to peace. Keep up the good work!"

RESULT: The ensuing war against the wrong enemy kills many. Also, domestic Nazi policy is believed by some experts to have claimed hundreds or even thousands of victims.* Still, war is hell, and we have to up Rachel's toll to 600 million. Margaret Sanger awards Carson the Paul Ehrlich Euthanasia and Eugenics Zealot Medallion.

But what about all those innocent little mice (and rabbits too) that died needlessly when DDT was banned and the eagles started propagating like rabbits again?

DDT has been the worst thing for my family since the Tom cat moved into great-grandpa Marty's house and ate his wife and half of his kids. I can't even count (mice can't you know) the number of relatives and friends I have lost due to that damned Johny Carson.

Gee, Anon 1:40, we would be a lot more impressed if the people trying to bash Rachel Carson had ever done anything in their lives to help anyone else, let alone those suffering from malaria.

By attacking WHO when it was launching an important effort against malaria, Bate, his front organization, Africa Fighting Malaria and the associated libertarian thoughtless tanks made a bad situation horrible. Many thanks.

Actually Anon 11:35, we believe in leaving Jesus Christ to do his thing. While us Rabetts are sexy souls, Ms. Rabett keeps Eli in line. Clearly you have major problems in that dimension and I recommend cold showers and perhaps a donation to http://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/news/malaria/index.cfmwould help.

It is precisely because Eli and the rest of the mice CARE about people with malaria that we object and ridicule the knaves who have tried to use malaria as a political weapon against an effective international campaign against malaria. Whether you are a knave or a fool remains open.

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Eli Rabett

Eli Rabett, a not quite failed professorial techno-bunny who finally handed in the keys and retired from his wanna be research university. The students continue to be naive but great people and the administrators continue to vary day-to-day between homicidal and delusional without Eli's help. Eli notices from recent political developments that this behavior is not limited to administrators. His colleagues retain their curious inability to see the holes that they dig for themselves. Prof. Rabett is thankful that they, or at least some of them occasionally heeded his pointing out the implications of the various enthusiasms that rattle around the department and school. Ms. Rabett is thankful that Prof. Rabett occasionally heeds her pointing out that he is nuts.