What Women Think About Getting Picked Up At The Gym

“My biggest issue is people pestering me when I’m busy,” Dani Shugart told me. “And even when I tell people I’m married they continue to flirt, and it crosses the line.” She doesn’t mind being social with friends between sets, but hates it when random guys start chatting with her in the middle of an exercise, blowing her concentration.

Lack of time is the number one reason people give for not exercising, and in the modern world we need to squeeze in workouts where we can. If she has to spend time fending off your advances, that’s less time she has for exercise. Not cool.

You might be creeping her out

Time for another hypocrisy alert. I’ve noticed attractive women at the gym, but at least tried to be casual about it: a quick glance using the mirror and back to work.

Others are not so subtle.

“I was on the leg press wearing short running shorts, and one guy kept very obviously looking at my legs and it really creeped me out,” Elizabeth Martin told me.

Kristi Holbert had a creepier creep. He approached at the gym, criticised her form, and told her they should be workout partners. Then he grabbed her workout log and wrote his name and phone number in it.

And when she didn’t call, he got angry. Even after telling him to back off, he kept hassling her. Some Googling of his name uncovered that he was a registered sex offender. Kristi approached the gym’s management and, even though it turned out there had been numerous complaints about him, they refused to speak with him out of fear of a lawsuit.

Oh, for Christ’s sake.

But that’s OK. Kristi got some friends to straighten the guy out. He got the message.

Does this whole article mean you can never speak to a woman at the gym? No, but be cool. Realise the signs of someone who is there just to workout and let her be. The gym is not your personal dating website, and it’s not cool to constantly be making people feel uncomfortable.

That being said, Elizabeth Martin reports, “There have been times I’ve been approached that it was flattering.” Although she is engaged, and makes that clear very quickly, if a guy is being polite and not staring, she’s OK with being approached. Especially if it’s someone she’s seen several times at the gym in the past.

So you don’t have to pretend women don’t exist at the gym, but don’t pretend like they’re there for your amusement either.