I’m a huge fan of feng shui. HUGE. But since my brother took over the downstairs, it looks like we live at an indoor flea market.

I stepped on something sharp earlier and bled all over the linoleum, couldn’t find what stabbed me amongst the debris.

The cheapest condo I could find in Cheshire is $89,000, I’ll need a $18,000 for the down payment. But there’s a much nicer condo for $135,000 in which case I’ll need $30,000.

I have almost $2,000 saved in cold hard cash hidden in my bedroom, but I’m using that for when I go bankrupt from that stinkin’ lawsuit against my business.

And I’m still $12,500 in debt.

Which means I’m fucked.

But get this……just listen……I’m starting to have free time again. Lots of free time! The business can stand on it’s own legs without me there. My mind is already spinning with new business idea’s.

I cleaned my car and tidied up my bedroom today – I only clean when my brain has free space, when I’m not overly worked or stressed. I clean when I’m happy. That’s what brought on my wanting to move out. A nice clean slate with ample room for all my shit.

But until then, I need $30,000 for a downpayment.

It’ll take forever for my business to come up with that kind of money and I don’t have forever, not anymore. I’m already 30 fucking 7 years old!

When I make up my mind to do something – it’s urgent. Always urgent.

As for my massage business, we’re rated 5 out of 5 stars on Groupon from of over 500 votes. We are creme de la creme, cream of the crop, A number one, KING OF THE HILLLLLLL.

And since I hired a receptionist, I feel she ties everything together. She takes pictures and tapes them up in the break area along with notes and reminders. I smile whenever I see one. It’s like, she really loves it there. She gets it.

I feel successful, kinda sorta. In my own unique way. But I’ll never feel it fully until I own my own place. Even if it’s a shitty place, I don’t care.

May 1st is Monday, my first official day off the work schedule. But I still have two clients that day…..I know, I know. I have trouble saying no to people. And then I have one on Thursday and another on Saturday. And then that’s it.

But if I’m serious about this condo thing, I might need to put myself back on the schedule and sell a shit ton of those signature couple’s massages again. If I sell 100 of them a month for 5 months, I can afford the downpayment for the condo in about 5 to 6 months.

I don’t know…..we’ll see. First I want to see how much I make without selling Groupons. 100 a month is a lot and would definitely require my hands.

Everything is such a process. A long lengthy process.

Today I woke up at 9:00, went to work for one client, came home and napped while listening to my audiobook for almost 3 hours, woke up and ate grilled cheese and tomato soup and then finished the day with Netflix. Well, technically I’m finishing it off with my blog. I can’t believe it’s 1:00AM already. I’m not even tired.

One of my therapists cut her thumb open and needed stitches so I’m taking her clients tomorrow which is fine, it’s extra money towards my debt. Besides, I ain’t got shit to do.

I can handle being on-call for when therapists call out. “It’s extra playing money” is how I see it. I’ll be making at least $100. But having to do it every day? No sir.

This is a good set-up. A win win really. But that 30 grand…..so far out of reach.