On The Periphery Of Valor

Frank returns after a long hiatus to lock surreal jungle horns over aretail
dispute.

I have three or so dead pixels on mine, they seem to have developed
over the (historically vigorous) newlywed period. I’m trying to
determine if it’s something I should be up at night worrying about.
In the most general terms, I choose perfection over defect - but I honestly can’t tell
if I’d be standing firm as a consumer in this case or just being fastidious. This is
like three pixels out of one hundred thirty thousand, five hundred and
sixty. When commanded thus by the hardware, the vast preponderance of the pixels display the appropriate color!

I’ve been told there is a method by which one can receive satisfaction in such matters, but whatever - I can’t be without it at the moment. It’s the only piece of technology I’m
allowed to bring with me while I’m gone next week, and I plan to cling desperately
to it, like a bouy in a storm-tossed sea.

When one is flying down to E3, the moment the sky lady says it’s
okay to do so great bricks of technology are produced from black bags up and
down the aisle. It is a fleeting airborne kingdom composed of awkward pariahs and I
anticipate it all year.

This was all before the two major handheld systems were capable of intimate wireless communion. It now occurs to me that a comprehensive etiquette must be developed to maximize this and indeed any flight in our glistening wireless age. Certainly I’m open to suggestions. The DS makes the set-up phase a breeze with the built-in Pictochat, something virtually every person over twelve despises and which now appears to be a major advantage. So, where the DS has with very few exceptions been a useless novelty factory, it is an excellent matchmaking service for the PSP.

I never said, and I probably should: I own Lumines, Wipeout, Ridge Racer, Metal Gear Acid, or AC!D or some shit, and Untold Legends. The first three belong with every PSP, in that order. The last two demand additional comment. Metal Gear Acid is satisfying, pretty bold for a launch title, and I’ll bet you can find that son of a bitch used because I’m sure tons of people bought it unawares. I found it fairly intimidating, even knowing full well what I was getting into - a kind of stealth tactical card battle… thing. You don’t need to play Untold Legends very long to find out why a person might not relate the legend in question: it’s simply not a very good legend. It absolutely follows the Baldur’s Gate: Dark Alliance/Champions Of Norrath playbook, but whether the hardware isn’t quite up to the task or the game mechanics are being joylessly iterated it’s hard to care about it one way or the other. As with all co-operative games, it can be endured much longer than the game itself warrants. And since it’s portable, you can hate it anywhere: on the bus, in the park, etc.