Thursday, January 17, 2008

First there was KNIE, the traveling circus. Then there was KNUT, a post-Christmas festival hosted by IKEA. I have a feeling KNUT is a Swedish thing, rather than a Swiss thing, since I seem to recall that I had an Uncle Knut up the road somewhere.

Actually, I am reading the materials now and it seems Knut was a famous Swedish king from 1086 who died in tragic circumstances. Ah, and January 13 is Knut day in Sweden. This day also marks the return of light hours. They dance around the Christmas tree and then throw it out the window. I did not make this up.

Back to KNUT, the festival. Last weekend, IKEA had a tree-throwing contest downtown to celebrate. We were deeply disappointed that our schedule did not allow for throwing trees. First prize was a 5000 CHF gift card. (Just imagine the deeper level of IKEAfication that would allow.) Consolation prize was a hotdog and mulled wine. (What they mean, I think, is that if you eat an IKEA hotdog, you will actually require consolation shortly thereafter. I speak from experience. Anyone who has shopped at IKEA knows that grievous compromises must sometimes be made to ensure a shockingly low price. In this case those compromises (on flavor, texture, and coloring) proved ruinous (i.e., completely disgusting). Only one person I know takes exception to this, and I find it totally baffling.)

Stylishly heading for a consolation prize

I wonder: Does IKEA do this everywhere? Or is it just that the Swiss seemed likely to get into this cold-weather fun? Or enough people kept getting Switzerland and Sweden confused so they just consolidated?

The missing of an opportunity to throw trees is compounded hugely by missing a simultaneous opportunity to drink mulled wine, ESPECIALLY in a Germanic culture (as they are the best at mulling wine). This is indeed tragic. (You know what else is tragic? How many entries behind I am on reading your blog.)

I am touched that you are even trying to keep up. I think most people would read the most recent one and call it good. I mean, who hasn't torn out a chunk of unread days from one of those one-a-day calendars at some point in their life?