Sunday, December 9, 2012

love and marriage

I
see that the Supreme Court is going to take on Prop 8 and the Defense
Of Marriage Act. I would be glad that this debate is finally going
to be put to rest but with such a conservative court, I'm not sure
that they will be able to keep their religious views out of it and
come to the only right decision.

Prop
8, in case you aren't aware, is California's amendment to their state
constitution that banned gay marriage. It has been challenged in the
courts and found to be unconstitutional but it's proponents keep
pushing it to a higher court and it finally made it's way to the top.
The challenge to DOMA is only against the section that prevents the
federal government from recognizing and giving the rightful benefits
to same sex marriages even if it is legal in the couple's home state.

It
seems to me the outcome should be pretty clear. In this country we
are supposed to have separation of church and state.

Although
many states have banned same sex marriages, their main reason for
doing so is based on their religious beliefs, a 5,000 year old book
of stories. Their god finds it abhorrent so they find it abhorrent
and since so many LGBT are not staying in the closet and insist on
being who they are in their public lives as well as their private
lives and they fall in love and want to get married, that somehow
threatens these religious people so they scrambled to make it against
the law. To 'define' marriage. And, by god, their tax dollars will
not go towards benefits to people that god abhors.

Only,
that's just their religious opinion.

The
reality of it is that human gender and sexuality is extremely
complex. It comes in many forms and there is no one 'right' way to
be.

Isn't
it enough that two people, regardless of their sex, have bonded in
love and want to have a committed relationship? And if special civil
rights are given to married people should not same sex couples be
granted those rights as well? Because it's not just about being able
to get health insurance through your spouse's job. It's about having
the right to sit by your loved one and make decisions for them while
they are gravely ill. It's about having the right to inherit,
without all the taxes, the estate of your partner. It's about having
the right to be recognized as a unit by all the powers that be. It's
about not being marginalized in your community. And yes, it's about
getting the same perks from the government as opposite sex couples
and why not?

Regardless
of what they claim, this group of religious people did not invent
marriage and should not be allowed to define marriage, an institution
that has existed in many forms throughout human civilization. I'm
not saying that these religious groups should be forced to marry LGBT
people if they are against it. I am saying they should not be
allowed to force their particular religious beliefs about the right
or wrong of human sexuality on the rest of the population and deny
marriage to anyone who so desires it. Marriage does not require a
religious ceremony.

It
is my great hope that the Supreme Court will be able to take religion
out of the equation altogether when they deliberate these two cases
because when you take religion out of the equation, there is not one
single good reason to deny the gay community the right to marry.

Yes Ellen! But of course! Religion should be abolished- religion seems to be the worst invention for human's advancing to a higher state of being, for a greater measure of compassion and intellect. It makes no sense other than to control and soak less evolved masses of folks . Yeah, It's dumb!! The Mormon church with it's big bucks pushed prop 8 through - their religion is all about making more people for their after life on their own planet, why wait, I say- go now please- and minding their silly religious rules contrived from a dude who could see god and hear god through a pebble in a hat...money makes sense, and some emotionally charged "truths" according to invented religion are used- like the very weak argument that "every child deserves a mother and a father" ...yeah, in a perfect world. I really don't understand the issue with religious folks, they are just mean spirited, I guess, and there goes the irony.

I keep saying it, but all I think is why should anyone else care if two people want to marry each other. It's not like gay marriages will take away the supposed sanctity they think they have in their heterosexual marriages. I just don't get it!Religious people have the right to believe whatever the heck they want but they don't have the right to try and make others think as they do. Well said Ellen!

Isn't it amazing how those people's god seems to have the same prejudices and biases that they themselves have? One doesn't hear them condemning the eating of shellfish, or insisting that unruly children be stoned...(although they may already be. Ha!)...even though their bible is just as clear about these things as anything else. But that would cost them something themselves, while picking out someone else's "sin" doesn't. Funny how that works.

"We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal"...except of course, for anyone they don't happen to like. That is, anyone different from themselves.

I had the radio on two days ago but wasn't really listening to the news, and mistakenly heard the Supreme Court had upheld Prop 8. What an unthinkable outcome that would be, especially with more states legalizing gay marriage (Washington state's law into effect today) suggesting that the country as a whole is moving in that direction. As you pointed out, those who oppose it mostly do so on religious grounds, which means that the last place in the country it will come to (barring some big Supreme Court decision) will be the Deep South. I'm disappointed that my own state, Oregon, hasn't made it legal, but it no doubt will within the next few years.

Amen Ellen! Although I'll just add a caveat that not EVERYONE's God abhors homosexuality - at least in my little corner of Episcopal land :) In fact, I met my first transgendered person at church. I realize we're in the minority though...

Hopefully your court will do the right thing. Marriage and all of its benefits has been legal for gay couples across Canada since 2005. In my province of Ontario, legalization was in 2003 and at that time, it was also ruled that survivor benefits for same sex spouses who died would become retroactive to 1985. I hope that before too long, it will be similar in your country.

The same book in the Bible that bans homosexuality bans eating shellfish and I see the state of California has shut down a 40-year-old oyster farm. Next I most certainly expect to see more stoning of those in the process of getting a divorce.