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On the Sidelines: Fight like a girl, Coach

Published: Thursday, January 31, 2013 at 10:34 p.m.

Last Modified: Thursday, January 31, 2013 at 10:34 p.m.

It all started when my dad signed me up for the East Henderson volleyball camp the summer before my eighth grade year.

I ended up signing up for Hendersonville's camp, too, that summer, and the one memory I have of that camp was being in Molly Pyles' group for a small drill. It was her job to hit the ball to about three of us in random order, and not only was it daunting but the sting on my arms lasted a few hours.

By the time I got to high school I was more eager for volleyball to start than anything else. After one season of playing volleyball for my middle school (well, if "playing" insinuates that I made the team and sat the bench) and then one season of club volleyball, I was hooked.

I was over the moon that I made the JV team at T.C. Roberson in the fall of 2000, but again, my inexperience must have shown through and I sat the bench for much of the first season (though I felt that I had more heart and love for the game than most of the girls on the court).

My sophomore year we got a new varsity coach, and after summer workouts and then official tryouts, I realized that the transition of a new coach brought a new opportunity for me. I had attended a few camps that summer — including North Carolina's camp in Chapel Hill — and worked hard at refining my skills even more to earn a starting spot on JV that season.

Well, I guess fresh-out-of-college Kristin Loftis (now Kristin Jones) picked up on that. Getting our new 23-year-old coach's attention meant a lot to me because she had just finished up four years of collegiate volleyball at Catawba where she played both defensive specialist and setter, so I knew she knew talent and potential when she saw it.

Instead of starting for JV (which was my goal), she decided that I was ready to join the varsity ranks. She saw something in me that my previous coaches had missed, and she took a chance — she believed in me, and that has left the biggest mark.

Knowing someone had that kind of confidence in me opened me up that much more to giving everything I had to the sport, to the team and to making her proud. But the bigger picture, as I see now, isn't about the sport itself; it's about how those seasons of hard work, discipline, learning how to be a leader and giving 110 percent helped formed me as a person for post-volleyball life.

I did work my way into regular playing time as a defensive specialist my sophomore year, but that didn't come easy and it didn't come without hard work and pushing myself. Coach was hard on me but it was because she wanted to develop the potential she saw — and looking back, I couldn't be more thankful for that.

Coach had her first baby near the end of my senior year of high school and we lost touch for the most part, as I went off to college and she stopped coaching. But our paths have crossed again, and now I'm seeing that "bigger picture" in an entirely new way in her life.

In September she was diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer. When I heard the news, I went through the gamut of emotions, from asking "why" and "how," to feeling sad and somewhat angry, to telling God it wasn't fair. She is only 34 years old, she has led a healthy life and she has a husband and two young children.

We grabbed lunch a few weeks ago to catch up, and other than her hairless head of hair showing the signs of months of chemo treatments, I forgot she was fighting for her life, fighting this cancer that has interrupted plans for where she probably thought she would be at 34 years old.

Coach was the usual smiling, warm and joking person I remember, and it's evident that her philosophies of life from which she coached and taught us on the volleyball court more than nine years ago have carried over to today as she sees this battle through with a strength and optimism that most people don't have even in 80 years of life.

Her former coach, North Henderson's Sue Moon, shared this same sentiment about Kristin with me for a story on Monday:

"Kristin has always been willing to take any challenge. She is fighting cancer with the same tenacity that she played point guard in basketball and setter in volleyball," Moon said. "She never tells me how hard it is. That just shows you the kind of person she is."

Going into my senior year at T.C., which was shaping up to be the most talented team of my four years there, we didn't have a setter. So Coach switched things up and gave me a crash course in setting that summer, and it ended up being my favorite position (other than defense).

After we had lunch together in early January, Coach wrote about that position switch from her perspective in her CaringBride.org journal entry a few days later:

"I moved (Brittany) from defensive specialist to setter in one year... not very fair to her, but she knew the game and had good hands, so tag she was it! She always kept her head on straight even when things got hairy. She always had a smile and an encouraging word. I still have the pep talk she wrote for our (last) playoff game. I will never forget those girls and how much I loved them and loved being their coach for my very favorite sport!"

She might not be in the gym coaching high school girls right now (though I won't stop dropping hints about her getting back into it), but she will forever be the coach that made the biggest impact on my life — and the coach that set the standard for the others that I now come into contact with day-to-day.

Coach, thank you for being an example to so many people. You got this.

<p>It all started when my dad signed me up for the East Henderson volleyball camp the summer before my eighth grade year. </p><p>I ended up signing up for Hendersonville's camp, too, that summer, and the one memory I have of that camp was being in Molly Pyles' group for a small drill. It was her job to hit the ball to about three of us in random order, and not only was it daunting but the sting on my arms lasted a few hours. </p><p>By the time I got to high school I was more eager for volleyball to start than anything else. After one season of playing volleyball for my middle school (well, if "playing" insinuates that I made the team and sat the bench) and then one season of club volleyball, I was hooked. </p><p>I was over the moon that I made the JV team at T.C. Roberson in the fall of 2000, but again, my inexperience must have shown through and I sat the bench for much of the first season (though I felt that I had more heart and love for the game than most of the girls on the court). </p><p>My sophomore year we got a new varsity coach, and after summer workouts and then official tryouts, I realized that the transition of a new coach brought a new opportunity for me. I had attended a few camps that summer — including North Carolina's camp in Chapel Hill — and worked hard at refining my skills even more to earn a starting spot on JV that season.</p><p>Well, I guess fresh-out-of-college Kristin Loftis (now Kristin Jones) picked up on that. Getting our new 23-year-old coach's attention meant a lot to me because she had just finished up four years of collegiate volleyball at Catawba where she played both defensive specialist and setter, so I knew she knew talent and potential when she saw it. </p><p>Instead of starting for JV (which was my goal), she decided that I was ready to join the varsity ranks. She saw something in me that my previous coaches had missed, and she took a chance — she believed in me, and that has left the biggest mark. </p><p>Knowing someone had that kind of confidence in me opened me up that much more to giving everything I had to the sport, to the team and to making her proud. But the bigger picture, as I see now, isn't about the sport itself; it's about how those seasons of hard work, discipline, learning how to be a leader and giving 110 percent helped formed me as a person for post-volleyball life. </p><p>I did work my way into regular playing time as a defensive specialist my sophomore year, but that didn't come easy and it didn't come without hard work and pushing myself. Coach was hard on me but it was because she wanted to develop the potential she saw — and looking back, I couldn't be more thankful for that. </p><p>Coach had her first baby near the end of my senior year of high school and we lost touch for the most part, as I went off to college and she stopped coaching. But our paths have crossed again, and now I'm seeing that "bigger picture" in an entirely new way in her life. </p><p>In September she was diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer. When I heard the news, I went through the gamut of emotions, from asking "why" and "how," to feeling sad and somewhat angry, to telling God it wasn't fair. She is only 34 years old, she has led a healthy life and she has a husband and two young children. </p><p>We grabbed lunch a few weeks ago to catch up, and other than her hairless head of hair showing the signs of months of chemo treatments, I forgot she was fighting for her life, fighting this cancer that has interrupted plans for where she probably thought she would be at 34 years old. </p><p>Coach was the usual smiling, warm and joking person I remember, and it's evident that her philosophies of life from which she coached and taught us on the volleyball court more than nine years ago have carried over to today as she sees this battle through with a strength and optimism that most people don't have even in 80 years of life.</p><p>Her former coach, North Henderson's Sue Moon, shared this same sentiment about Kristin with me for a story on Monday: </p><p>"Kristin has always been willing to take any challenge. She is fighting cancer with the same tenacity that she played point guard in basketball and setter in volleyball," Moon said. "She never tells me how hard it is. That just shows you the kind of person she is." </p><p>Going into my senior year at T.C., which was shaping up to be the most talented team of my four years there, we didn't have a setter. So Coach switched things up and gave me a crash course in setting that summer, and it ended up being my favorite position (other than defense). </p><p>After we had lunch together in early January, Coach wrote about that position switch from her perspective in her CaringBride.org journal entry a few days later: </p><p>"I moved (Brittany) from defensive specialist to setter in one year... not very fair to her, but she knew the game and had good hands, so tag she was it! She always kept her head on straight even when things got hairy. She always had a smile and an encouraging word. I still have the pep talk she wrote for our (last) playoff game. I will never forget those girls and how much I loved them and loved being their coach for my very favorite sport!" </p><p>She might not be in the gym coaching high school girls right now (though I won't stop dropping hints about her getting back into it), but she will forever be the coach that made the biggest impact on my life — and the coach that set the standard for the others that I now come into contact with day-to-day. </p><p>Coach, thank you for being an example to so many people. You got this.</p>