Bangla speakers are famous with the colorful term used to denote a lazy oaf: “গোঁফখেজুরে” (which can be transliterated as gonph-khejure). The word literally means someone who has a date on his mustache.

I’ve heard one story of how this description came to be. Once a man was sleeping underneath a date palm. Quite fortuitously, a date fell on his face, right on top of his well-oiled mustache. The man was so lazy that instead of raising his hand and putting the date in his mouth, he wriggled his face and tried to maneuver his tongue so he could eat the date. Unfortunately, he did not succeed.

Is this story, true? Almost certainly not, but it doesn’t matter.

The moral of the story is don’t keep a mustache. Or sleep with your mouth open. Or something like that.