Friday, June 15, 2012

Three simple requests, Ms Lopez

1. Leave your sound system, with it's wall-and-windows shattering "realistic" sound, in your luxurious penthouse apartment. Don't let anyone install it in their SUVs or trucks so they can come by my house at 3 AM blasting bass-centered "music" at a volume loud enough to set off earthquakes along unstable fault lines.

2. Enjoy your sound system. Crank it up. Let the sound engulf you and drown out everything else- especially your cell phone. So you don't get that call from your agent asking you to fulfill your contract obligation for that sequel to Gigli.

3. Give one of these sound systems to Ben Affleck. Why? See No. 2.*

*"Gigli" and "No. 2" in the same post. Just makes sense somehow, doesn't it?