Friday, April 28, 2017

I dreaded round two of chemo. Really dreaded it. However, God chose to give me one of the best night’s sleep the day before chemo, and I woke with a clear head and happy heart. With teaching done for the morning, Bryan and I stole out for a lunch at Pei Wei before we headed to the hospital.
The doctor was very pleased in what he saw. By outward appearances, the tumor is shrinking. That news accompanied with the clear tests taken previously means we are on the right track.
I was very concerned this week that my white blood count would not be high enough for chemo. Next week is Laura’s college graduation in Ohio, and I desperately wanted to be there, not in a chemo room. I gave that specific request to many prayer warriors. God chose to answer that positively so chemo was a go.
At the first chemo treatment I took an Ativan, but this time I chose not to take anything. That decision proved to be wise as I am not nearly as wiped out as I was two weeks ago. Also nausea is very minimal. That said, it was amazing how quickly all the meds pumped into my body changed my perky self from the morning to a sluggish, tired momma.
It was a gorgeous day yesterday both outside and inside. Bryan and I noticed with only one exception, all the patients in the chemo room wore not only bald heads, but also bright smiles. One sat coloring. Another crocheting. Most had a friend or family member with them. Not one complained about all the chirping and beeping of the machines waiting attention.
As my three syringes of red devil were carefully pushed via my port, my nurse, Tammie, and I chatted about Easter, family, God provisions, and patience in this trial. I look forward to chatting with her more.
We left after 3 ½ hours. As we waited for the car (the hospital has valet service ), I got to sit next to the grumpy one from the chemo room. Her husband was picking her up, but I had not seen him in the chemo room. He is having a hard time knowing how to help her, I gathered. What made her happy was the perogies she was going to make for dinner. I think she likes to cook. I congratulated her on her 52 years of marriage and wished her a wonderful evening. She cracked a little smile.
Sonic is on the way home, so Bryan and I have made it a ritual to stop for our shakes after chemo. I may not get it all eaten, but it is definitely a treat I look forward to.
I am so abundantly blessed. I still cry occasionally. I don’t know why God has chosen to allow cancer, but I most likely never will. I get frustrated that my energy is so zapped. I get angry at my kids when I feel I should not. Sometimes, I cannot complete a coherent thought. (Now that my be due to my crazy life anyway.). But I look around and listen and cannot help but see grace God has given through so many. I do not deserve such love, but I will be forever thankful.

What God is Showing Me

Something About Me

Bryan and I have celebrated 25 years of marriage this year, and I am blessed. We have 8 children through both natural birth and adoption. Our journey has been one with blessings and bruises. I have the privilege of teaching our children at home which can be considered both an honor and a road to insanity, depending on the day. God continues to show himself in big ways as we grow together as a family.