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Friday, April 27, 2012

Whether it is an unblocking or pushing past the fear, there are many creative tools to move through it to be the writer you were meant to be. Your soul is waiting for your empowered, authentic, and creative self. Stop preventing your dreams from being your reality.

The sheer intensity that a creative person can prevent themselves from creating is astounding. I have found myself floating on the web from one site to another to prevent myself from writing, thinking myself blocked. I have also found myself completely wrapped up in trash television to avoid the blank page or the next project that I know I want to create.

I do not believe that it is a block. I believe it is the fear or not believing in yourself enough to know you have greatness in you. I believe it is more about pushing past the fear to your creative soul than it is to unblocking it.

Today I have set a goal for myself to write as much as I can just to see what I am capable of. I feel the fear and anxiety creeping in. I know that if I let it, I won't achieve my goal. Here are some of the things I have done to push past it.

Create a list of twenty-six phrases, off the top of your head, to start paragraphs or pages with.

Make a list (at least 30) of your favorite words and keep it to the right of your screen to look at as you write.

Allow yourself to write nonsense; pages and pages of nonsense.

Write down every reason why you think you can not write then burn it.

Write what would happen if you wrote a best seller.

Create a story about your childhood with an imaginary friend, whether you had one or not.

Write a different ending to a story from your childhood that didn't turn out the way you wanted.

Write a story about a moment in your childhood that felt empowering.

Write a forgiveness piece forgiving everyone in your life that you feel hurt you and forgive yourself for any that you have hurt.

Set goals, if I write for this amount of time or this amount of words then I can (fill in the blank).

Use a different writing tool. If you always type, write with a pen. If you always use a pen use a pencil, use a crayon even. See how different you write with different tools. Do you tap into your inner child when you use the crayons?

Dance to your favorite music then write for at least an hour, repeat.

I know how hard it can be to push past the fear but if you are like me at all, you are always thinking about writing. If you think about it that much then stop thinking about it and write for goodness sakes. Even if it is only for you it is better than being miserable and always thinking what if or if only. Write because you love it. Write because you feel like you are going to die if you do not put your pen to paper. It has to feel better than not writing.

Your soul yearns for you to do what you love. If you are not doing it then you are sleep walking through life. Wake up and do what you love now. It is in remembering your authentic creativity that is a key element in your journey to wholeness. What are you waiting for, permission? Love yourself enough to do what is important to feed your soul today.

*Previously posted on Shadow Rhythms I wrote this before I created A Writer's Universe and before I submerged myself into this writing life.

Hi Rowers! I know I haven't mentioned it but I have been busy this last week working on the transition for Story Dam. I and three other writing friends, Tui Snider @mentalmosaic at Mental Mosaic Susan Silver @cirquedumot at Cirque Du Mot and Nicole Rivera @riverand at Rivera Runs Through it are the new team and we are doing our ReLaunch tomorrow, Sunday. I am very excited. Hoping that once things get a little settled I will be able to participate more over here at Row80 because I have promised myself that I am going to spend quality time with my writer friends once it does!

I am excited about my memoir. This week I really turned a corner with it after worrying that once again I was stalling out. I am writing every morning and enjoying the flow of words.

I am keeping up with my morning pages, I so love to purge. (and it seems my poetic meanderings are flowing over into my other writings. It's either comical or may want to make you vomit.) :D

I am taking everything one step at a time and keeping my goals in mind. I did stumble a bit with this poetry challenge, skipped two days, but I plan on working to fill in the days that I missed.

I am reading more this round because I felt that last time I was so obsessed with the writing and social media that I didn't take the time to enjoy reading, which I love.

Looking forward to catching up with all of you and seeing what you are doing this round!

Hope you have a wonderful holiday!

Peace,
Morgan

Blessings come in many forms and I always feel blessed when you choose to share. Tweet

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

My hand against the door my fear grew
waiting, wondering, daring I blew
my heart dances my feet of glue
my head pounds are my fears undue
I push the door, hoping for a clue
I close my eyes as I step through

I stand and wait, I fear to tread
holding my breath, wishing I fled
the tales are false for I have bled
I turn not to dust nor to lead
I look to heaven but I'm not dead
there really wasn't anything to dread

I watched as the five siblings stood holding hands in a circle near the river. I could see and feel everything they saw and felt. I closed my eyes and felt the grass beneath their feet, I heard the water flowing over the rocks, I felt the air moving around them, the heat of the sun warming their skin, and deep within them I felt spirit swelling within their heart. They hummed softly slowly building the sound, varying the tone up and down. As one they pushed the loving, healing energy down into the water, I could see through them as it began changing, clearing, cleaning, and energizing.

Their humming grew louder until I could feel the very air around me vibrating. I wanted to see for myself and opened my eyes. I looked down and saw wild roses opening within seconds, everything looked greener and more vibrant. I didn’t make a sound. I didn’t want to do anything to distract them. I could see the water becoming clearer before my eyes. The sound vibrating from them slowly dropped to a soft hum until they were completely quiet. A moment later I saw them open their eyes and I waited until tall gangly Orrin, caught my eye and nodded slightly.

My skin tingled, I felt slightly dizzy, and my mouth felt dry as I whispered softly, “That was…” I swallowed a lump in my throat. “amazing. I have never seen anything like this ever.” They all five smiled, fairly glowing with the energy they just channeled through them to heal the water as they dropped their hands simultaneously.

“We felt it important to show you first hand.” Orrin, the oldest at fifteen, spoke first.

Thirteen year old twins, Meira and Ethan, shared almost everything including sentences. “It is very important that you understand and are able to,” Meira’s twin, Ethan, picked up where she left off. “use all your senses to be our scribe.”

“Very important events are happening now and nothing is ever going to be the same.” Galen, rather quiet for a ten year old, added.

“We have chosen you, because we have seen you in the future and know that you will still be here to complete the story.” Annie, barely five years old, added with laughter in her voice.

“But what is going to happen to all of you?” My eyes hurt as tears threatened to spill. They all smiled lovingly, as they moved closer to me.

Galen took my hand, looked directly into my eyes as he said, “We can’t see our future. We don’t know exactly what will happen but we know that whatever happens will be for the highest and best for all. Our parents understand that and you need to understand that as well, if you are going to help us.” Warmth spread through my body then was gone when Galen took his hand away.

“Yes of course. I am honored.” I looked them each directly eye to eye, soul to soul, then bowed slightly, “I am committed to giving my full attention, all of my senses,” I glanced at the twins and smiled, “To this task.”

“Thank you.” All five siblings said in unison.

“You do understand the importance of secrecy at this time? There are those that don’t understand and are misguided in their efforts to keep us from our goal, as well as those that would knowingly stop us if they can.” Orrin said standing with his feet apart and fingers pointing down toward the earth beneath him. I could practically see the energy moving back and forth between him and the earth. I wonder if he is ever not communing with our mother/sister earth.

“Yes, I understand.” They moved as one again back toward the path that led to the van.
A hawk flew over head and Meira looked up.

“We need to hurry, Greyfeather says there is someone moving in this direction and it would be better if our paths didn’t cross.”

I looked up as the hawk flew away, my eyes growing wide. Orrin had mentioned their animal guides but I thought they were like others and of the spirit world. Goosebumps rose on my flesh. Would I be meeting all of their animal guides? Sweat trickled down my sides. I looked back over my shoulder. Galen smiled reassuringly at me.

“Don’t worry, I believe he is too far away and we will get to the car and to safety.” Galen mistaking my anxiety for the danger we could be in due to the stranger. I kept silent not wanting to know just yet what the other animal guides were.

As we drove up to their house in their van, I wondered what their parents really thought about all of this. I could feel the excitement building to uncover all the many layers of this story. Would they really tell me everything I wanted to know, everything I needed to know to chronologically document every detail?

I had a hard time with C. It took me all day to find that place and begin with the first line. I asked my daughter for a C word and she immediately gave me THE C word. I told her I didn't think that would do. I dig inside and pull and tug for something that will release, to connect. Ah now that is a C word connect, making connections. Isn't that something we are all trying to do, make connections.

We reach out then pull back again and again. I debated whether continuing the journey with my fellow Rowers at A Round of Words in 80 Days. I have so much going on in my life right now I thought I didn't have time. But at the core, this group is about me, about what I need to support my writing. So I am here, ready to begin the next round.

Writing in my Memoir weekday mornings for an hour to an hour and a half with my Memoir writing buddy, Tui at Mental Mosaic. It is really early, 6 a.m. EDT, so it is definitely a challenge for me. You can join us at #earlyword #wordmongering if you are a morning person. (or are still up from a late nighter)

I am keeping it simple because there is so much going on in my life right now. I am happy just to be writing every day. I look forward to this Rowing journey and making more connections with my fellow Rowers.

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Grab a cup of tea or coffee (oh what the heck, get a danish too!) and sit a spell. You might want to grab your notebook and pen because you never know when you will be inspired to write down a quote, or jot down a poem of your own. Words are like that, they take you on a journey and the next thing you know you are breathing life into your own magical world of words.