CFDS Episode 005 Vicki’s Story: From Food Lover to Child Protector

Vicki from LegitChics shares her raw journey from food lover to child protector. Plus one of the most common foods around that can actually help regulate estrogen levels, help with migraines and help eliminate PMS.

What you will learn

about one food lover’s journey that led her to protect children and families

the most common food around that can actually help regulate estrogen levels, help with migraines and help eliminate PMS

At the end of this episode I’ll share with you one of the cheapest foods you can buy that can help transform your health if you’re a food lover too, and Marilyn Monroe ate this food every day. OK that was a huge hint!

Have you got any idea what food it is? You’ll find out.

On with the story

This story comes to us from Vicki Marie, who is an incredible woman. Vicki is the founder of LegitChics.com where she shares other women’s stories of their triumphs, survival, struggles, trauma, loss and grief, and what we all can learn from their experiences.

In addition to founding LegitChics and being what she calls a Bad Ass Solopreneur, Vicki is also a Women’s Empowerment & Resiliency Coach, a Family Safety & Family Enrichment Coach, a Crime Victim Advocate, a Social Worker, an Educator and a Survivor.

So here’s Vicki’s story, which I’m going to share with you in her own words.

Vicki’s story: from food lover to child protector

“I love food. I mean really love it. Let me put it this way – when my sister and I were having the team Edward vs. team Jacob debate (like all sisters do right!) – I went team Jacob all the way. I told her I could never give up food – especially Mexican food! To give up chips and salsa, enchiladas, tacos … no fucking way! She laughed and tried to convince me to be on team Edward by saying, “You could always just eat a Mexican!” Oh, my God we laughed so hard I almost peed myself. But seriously – give up food? Come on.”

A lifelong struggle

“My whole life I have struggled with my extra chub. I think my earliest memories of feeling self-conscious started in junior high – like most of us do at that age.

“One time while making a sandwich my step grandmother made a comment about how much Miracle Whip I was putting on my ham and cheese sandwich and how that was going to go straight to my hips.

“My dad commented on how wide my butt was getting.

“Better yet was the time we got weighed in for PE in front of the whole class and one of the guys (yes, I remember you) held up a sign with my weight for the whole class to see.

“In 8th grade I was fully grown and bigger than the awkward scrawny guys, and weighing in at 154 I was mortified. I maintained that weight all through High School and even following the birth of my daughter.

But that wasn’t good enough

“I prayed and prayed God would just help me lose 20 pounds – that’s all I asked for. Funny how living with extreme abuse by my mother and I was more worried about that 20 pounds than anything else.

“I remember in High School a guy told me I was really pretty and all but that I’d get more boyfriends if I wasn’t fat. I was devastated. What I’d give to be back to 154 lbs now. Looking back, I was perfect at that weight and size. I was in size 7 and 9s back then. I haven’t seen that weight since my hysterectomy in 2003.

“Following the hysterectomy, I gained 100 pounds within the first year and have been a size 22 or 3X consistency.

Eating anything and everything

“Since then it seems no matter what I do that weight will not budge. If I eat everything in sight or I diet like a crazy person it just stays the same.

“I’ve tried to convince myself that people don’t treat me any differently, that my kids (all 5 of them) don’t love me any less, and to know me is to love me. But, even with my public confidence and my outwardly “I don’t give a shit” attitude – deep down I care.

“I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad, I eat when I’m stressed, I eat when I’m anxious, I eat when I want to set a sex offender on fire. You name the emotion and I’ll eat it.

“Do I have bad eating habits? Sure. Do I starve myself all day just due to the simple fact I didn’t have time to eat then get home after work and eat everything that isn’t nailed down because I’m so hungry? Yep. And, do I get fast food or a quick snack of beef jerky and chips at that gas station when I’m out with Law Enforcement investigating child abuse? Hell yes.

“I have horrible habits. I know that. But like I said earlier, it doesn’t seem to matter what I do – I can eat till I drop or diet and eat healthy and it doesn’t matter. The weight stays the same.

Helping people now

“As a mom of 5 children, 28 years and counting parenting experience (you learn as you go believe me), a previous foster parent and Child Protection Social Worker and Investigator for the past 11 years, currently a Crime Victim Advocate and Women’s Empowerment, Resiliency & Life Coach and a Family Safety & Family Enrichment Coach, I’ve worked with and helped hundreds and hundreds of women, children, and families in crisis.

“I work with victims of crime, victims of physical and sexual abuse and assault, Domestic Violence, people who are struggling with substance use and abuse, mental health, trauma, families who experience the loss of a child or death of a loved one, as well as victims of child abuse and neglect.

“I help families stay safe.

“If you need help in any of those areas – I’ve got you covered. But, if you need help with weight like I do – get help from someone who is an expert in this field.

“Barbara, I’m all yours girl! Whatcha got? Vicki Marie”

Some ideas for Vicki and other food lovers (and you, if any of this sounds familiar)

First of all, Vicki thank you SO much for sharing your story with us. I mean, what an incredible journey. I find it very inspiring – and I’m sure anyone listening does too.

You’ve been able to take your experience of abuse and have the strength and courage to not only contribute to but also to build resources and a coaching practice to help others in similar situations. I just think that’s incredible. You’re one strong woman.

Now you’ve asked me for a food tip, and yup, I’ve got a great one for you.

You said that weightloss after your hysterectomy is a challenge, and I’ve definitely got some tips for you.

Before I share them though, I just want to say for those of you listening that any advice I give here is based on my own personal experience. Each listener is responsible for his or her own health. I take no responsibility for anything you decide to do or not do as a result of what I say. So if you’re in any doubt or you require medical advice in your particular situation, please contact the appropriate health professional.

First some non-food tips

OK. The first thing I’d say Vicki would be to make sure that you don’t have an undiagnosed thyroid problem. I don’t know if you’ve seen a doctor for that, but if you haven’t, that might be a good place to start.

The second thing I’d say has to do with my own experience in the area of abuse and weight issues.

Sometimes extra weight can be our unconscious way of protecting ourselves. It sounds like you deal with really tough situations every day, so I wonder if it’s possible that the extra weight helps you protect yourself unconsciously on some level.

I say that because I used to have that problem myself, and also not all women gain weight after a hysterectomy. So there could be another reason.

I’m not a therapist. I’m not a coach. I’m just a fellow survivor with a long experience of therapy, personal development and spiritual practices. And that’s what came to my mind, so I wanted to share it in case it helps someone.

The food tips

First, what to avoid, especially for estrogen levels

Now in terms of the food that can help you, first I want to tell you one food to avoid, OK? And that food is soy.

The reason you want to avoid soy is because it has phytoestrogens that mimic estrogen in the body, which play havoc with your hormone balance.

This is true not only for women, but for men and children as well. That’s why you see men who aren’t that overweight with man boobs. I mean, that’s an estrogen thing.

It’s kind of scary, and I could talk for the entire podcast about why estrogen levels are important to control and how you can do that, but I won’t.

So, if you’re drinking soya milk for example, please stop! Better choices for plant-based milks are any nut milk, or hemp, or rice milk, or coconut milk. Anything but soy.

What to add into your diet

Right, now here’s a food for you to add into your diet Vicki. I don’t know if you eat it or not, but hopefully you’ll start now!

It’s a super common food that actually helps detox and eliminate excess estrogen.

Apparently Marilyn Monroe ate this food every day. She also smoked and drank a lot, but she ate this one superfood every day.

The best part is that this food doesn’t come in a fancy package as a dried superfood powder that costs the earth. It’s actually one of the cheapest foods you can get.

You’re gonna be surprised. Are you ready? The food is…carrot!

Did you guess it? If you did let me know, OK?

So why carrots?

Raw carrots actually have a particular fiber that absorbs excess estrogen and helps get it out of the body. Isn’t that cool?

So if you know anyone suffering from PMS, including migraines, ask them to eat one raw carrot each day and see what happens.

I’m not making this up. In the shownotes for this episode I’ll link to an article by Dr Ray Peat where he explains more about estrogen levels and how he found that his migraines disappeared by eating one raw carrot a day. I’ll also link to another article that explains the link between raw carrots and estrogen.

Best way to eat your carrots

Now how do you eat your one carrot a day?

Well, it has to be raw. And for best results, you want to eat it in between meals, so just pick one up and munch on it. The best carrots are large, organic carrots.

Just avoid any pre-peeled carrots, because the peel on the carrot helps protect it from picking up bacteria, and if they’re organic, you don’t have to peel them. You can just wash them to remove any excess dirt.

And if you want to up your intake of carrots with your meals as well, try dipping them into my Spinach Dip, or shredding them to add to soups and salads.