Never Go Mud Bogging With a Rabid Deer

Posted
on November 17, 2011

His total lack of driving ability should be an immediate tip off to why you should never go mud bogging with a Rabid Deer.

But we know you’re living the Rabid Deer life. You have to try new experiences. You want to see new sights and sounds. You want to go mud bogging with a Rabid Deer. You just figure mud bogging is so much fun, slipping and sliding, and throwing up a big pile of mud behind you, doing it with a Rabid Deer has got to be even better. It’s our job to try and talk some sense into you.

Just in case you haven’t noticed a Rabid Deer’s lack of driving ability, we must point out his deficiencies:

n He doesn’t have opposable thumbs, so his wheel gripping leaves a lot to be desired.

n He doesn’t understand spatial relationships, so the chances of him hitting a tree are quite good.

n He usually doesn’t drive the best vehicle for mud bogging. Rabid Deer think they can go mud bogging in a Cadillac El Dorado.

n His antlers usually keep him from turning his head towards you and saying, “Watch out we’re going into a ravine.”

Of course, this just speaks to his lack of driving ability. There are other reasons you should never go mud bogging with a Rabid Deer, even if you’re driving. Here they are:

n Rabid Deer never buy the beer. They claim they have no pockets for beer money, but we think this is just another of their many excuses.

n Rabid Deer are useless when it comes to talking girls (or guys for you adventurous women) into going mud bogging with you. They just slobber a lot and leer.

n GPS is not in the vocabulary of a Rabid Deer, so you will get lost on your way to the great mud bogging spot you’d heard about.

n Sometimes the Rabid Deer gets too excited and jumps out of the Jeep when you’re mud bogging.

n Rabid Deer have been known to gore you when you hit a hole.

n And, if all that isn’t enough -- remember, a Rabid Deer can be a real stick in the mud.

So leave the Rabid Deer at home, or better yet, you can wear one on your cap or T-shirt, or put one on the rear windshield of your mud bogging 4x4. You can get them at Rabid Outdoors