7. Sexual fantasies about patients?

8. My help won’t always be direct

Sometimes I tell you to do the opposite of what I really want you to do. For instance, I might tell you that this week I want you to be really depressed, to think about all the reasons you are depressed each day. It works for two reasons: First, nobody likes to be told what to do. And it helps you realize that you have a choice in how you feel.

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9. We’re not yes-men

Please don’t ask things like “Don’t you agree?” If you’re looking for approval, you’re not going to get it. A good counselor is not there to say yes to everything.

10. It’s all been done

No matter what you tell me, I’ve probably heard it before. You aren’t going to shock me.

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11. Really, it’s not you

Unlike with cancer and heart disease, people with mental illness often think it’s their fault. So when they get better, they’re proud of themselves for conquering adversity when, really, it was just the Prozac.

12. Get it straight!

Psychiatrists are doctors who go to medical school. Psychologists usually have a doctoral degree. Both of us can do therapy, but only psychiatrists can prescribe medication.

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13. Doing good may be the real solution to your problems

If you feel isolated and alone in the world, I probably can’t cure you in psychotherapy. That is the main issue for a lot of the patients I see. But the best thing you can do is go out in the world and help people.