We couldn’t have pulled this one off without the help of this adorable young woman. You’ll see in the coming days she’s as smart as she is sexy. Leo and I will now return to our bottles of Jim Beam and enjoy the rest of this wild ride…

Ummm, no this was NOT the best thing ever. It was actually pretty awful.

Semper

This is stupid. She didn't make it up….she just held the signs. What's the big deal? Did anyone think she really quit that way? Of course it was a hoax. It was just for entertainment. You guys are so dumb.

Hokey

What's so finny is that only a handful of idiots actually thought this was real. Almost everyone realized this was a pretty lame hoax. It's a pretty girl who can't act, holding up implausible signs. Just lame.

Is this the chive's idea of entertainment? I'd rather watch paint dry. The hoax was so uncreative and poorly implemented that it comes across as quite insulting of whoever the hell reads this site I've never heard of.

Viral marketing for a site that wants to do viral marketing… you guys should be embarrassed at this effort. I've never heard of the other hoaxes, though I'm sure they were lame too. Anyone wishing to purchase some viral marketing from this site should go with someone a little more creative, with better talent.

hotkey likes men

then gtfo off this site

B-Dog

It was an obvious hoax…… Who would be a receptionist for 2 years in hopes of becoming a BROKER? To become a broker you need a degree in FINANCE, pass your series 7, and then get a job at a brokerage firm.

She is hot though.

JohnnyBoy

Chive report some real fucking news

mememe

psst, ill never link shit from this site again… these assholes did this to pull in the attention and the web viewing, congratulations, they did exactly that, plus lost my respect. good job you money grubbing attention whores..

Harry

Elyse sucks!!!! No more stupid hoaxes.

http://lathompson.com Antonio

I mean, ELYSE rocks!

Hokey

What's funny is that these fanboy comments are probably just faked too.

Even the people interested in this hoax noted it was obviously fake. The acting was terrible and the idea was just dull and pointless.

I'm sure there is someone out there who is dumb enough to find this interesting or even dumb enough to believe the acting and concept. But those people are not intelligent enough to operate a computer, for the most part.

Viral marketing should be clever. Unless, I suppose, you mainly want to weed out the intelligent and clever audience, and build 'the chive' audience out of the dumbest morons you can find. Someone has to buy all those shamwows and ab blasters.

perry

could care less if it's a hoax, i lol'd. and she is beautiful

matt

could NOT care less.

http://www.simplifyitsolutions.blogspot.com Boris

So you are able to care less, and you do care that it is a hoax? Maybe you meant "couldn't care less". Meaning you don't care that is is a hoax, and she is still hot.

dirtyrussianhater

Hey Boris… Ever heard of a 'contraction'? It's like this:
Could Not = Couldn't
Is Not = Isn't
We Would Have = we'd've

Way to be, buddy.

SpongeRinger

Moron American. You 'couldn't care less'.

partly

was funny watching the media point fingers, accuse, and speculate. Meanwhile the chive was just doing it for the lulz. i tip my hat

Notbeingasuckup

Where was the lulz? They manipulated you all into thinking something epic had happened when it hadn't. There was nothing funny about the first post, they were trying to be epic, and now they look like assholes.

http://www.facebook.com/elyse.porterfield Elyse Porterfield

I love you guys! Thank you so much for all of this!

Max

:*

jojo

🙂 wtg girl. milk it.

AnyoneForCoffee

Love your work, girl! Full kudos!

And my number is [………], no pressure.

Chris

Go for it, Girl!! 😀
Great job, great facial expressions!
You will get far, no doubt about that anymore!!

Chris
-Europe-

coocoocuchoo

haha! Chris -Europe- thats funny

Tom
-Earth-

http://www.facebook.com/javierlopezurena Javier López Ureña

Thank you to you, Elyse! It was funny!

memyselfandi

wow you are awesome!

MiPo_TheGoaT

Elyse, you must now be punished for your transgressions….30 lashings for you, filmed and then posted on The Chive as your penance

Blue

Girl.
You deserve some sort of award. I wish I was a casting director, cause you would be hired in a minute.
Beautiful. And I am guessing…pretty smart.
Keep working at it and good luck!

http://isaaclw.com isaaclw

I don't know why people keep saying that.
Just cause she can make faces doesn't mean that she's smart.

Nice going – speaking as someone in Fort Collins, I hope you've been away from Greeley long enough to get the stink off of you. 😉
I hope this is a nice jump-start to a successful career for you.

LawChive

she's from Greeley? No longer hot.

Don

Elyse, great job – you are gorgeous and charismatic. Now I look forward to seeing you in movies and on TV!

Mauricio

That was amazing!

Chris

You are lovely Elyse. I'm sure that you will be successful.

alan

would love to meet you one day

Dave

You are very attractive and it was hard to read the board because I had to take my eyes off you!!!!

Rick S.

Well, at least one thing about your "spoof" was true. You really are a HOPA!!!😉

P-90

You are ridiculously beautiful.

Joe

Love your facial expressions darlin!!

Spence

Nice work, Elyse. You trash me so you can get a job. Who's the jerk?

http://www.modelmayhem.com/amf Aimee Fant

Elyse~! Holy moly- I am chomping at the bit to post my parody to your HOPA Hoax and am not able to get a hold of anyone…I have a parody to your viral frame by frame. Is there anyway to link my post to your's? This is my first time posting on The Chive. Someone help!

Pamela

Too bad it wasn't real….It would have been an EPIC way to quit😄 I gotta keep that in mind in case I ever quit somewhere. It was a great laugh, and I'm sure you'll be big someday😀

trombone – get a grip it was cool. My bosses loved it. lighten up you jerk and don't be hatin.

grodon

look who's talking.

Son of Dad

It's not trombone's fault… he's rusty.

tonedog

trombone, what a hatin' dipshit man…chill out, the girl was having fun and it's a riot! Maybe you need to adjust your meds…

Kate

Trombone – you afraid she was talking about you

ford prefect

sorry trombone, did you type that while looking in the mirror? She only embodies the hellish life of a whole sector of busin ess life – underpaid or even unpaid young hopefuls who get shat on by asshole male ADs. Or was this one too close to home for you? Go Elyse, Go Chive!

equality is a bitch

WOW WOW WOW. Why do you talk about being treated poorly in the work place and then say that it is male ass holes doing all the shating. Trust be there are bitchy women in the work force shating on males too.

Your comment is fine just try not to be gender specific. Beleive it or not, not all men are ass holes.

fma

you're not an actress, you're a hpoa

chive is gay

agreed

djp

Luckily for Elyse, most people don't make the distinction anymore =)

http://www.facebook.com/fly.conley Fly Durden

I was thinking the same thing heh

Tim

Hate to say it after the fact, but I kinda figured it was a hoax. Bar the "where is she taking these pics?" and "they seem extremely well taken for just some wannabe broker quitting her job", there's the dyslexic 'HOPA" term, the farfetched "garbage di-spencer" gag and the unlikely half-a-working-week playing Farmville. Still, certainly got everyone's attention and great launchpad for Elyse. I hope she's a geek – Hollywood needs more girls like Olivia Munn😉

...

and how many emails were sent to hold the 15 or whatever HQ pics

Kirbster

Please don't put Olivia Munn on the same level as this girl, Elyse is 10x hotter, not even close.

aosux

Are you out of your friggin mind?

Ed-fROMNJ

I've had PHBs who definitely had the time to sit on FarmVille all day (but not all of them had the brains for it). [And I can't believe this thing wouldn't let me list my name as "Ed" because it's "too short"!]

Iambetterthanyou

yep.

Anonymous

You mean. Less Olivia Munn. She destroys the reputation for girl gamers everywhere.

Kathryn

Actually, dude, the half week of Farmville was the most credible bit – that was what had me going. Totally believable. Unless perhaps you are saying the time said to be spent playing Farmville should have been more?🙂

I do agree the quality of photography made it suspect…

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001252728515 Lorelai Ross

No kidding, bosses everywhere sit on their butts playing computer games while they take away the coffee breaks of their employees and tell them they can't have their vacation this year because things are 'just too tight'. that part was smack on.
this was a particularly timely little piece because most of us are just plain grateful to have a job at all, and we're putting up with garbage to keep it. I imagine a giant cheer went up around the working world from seeing these, we all wish we had the balls to do the same thing, Even if it wasn't real, we all wanted it to be.

it happens all the time…entitled asshole bosses piddle their time away and then jump down the throats of their hard working employees for not pulling enough of the boss's incompetent dead weight behind them…check this out:http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn17984-its-o…

i'd like to give a shout out to my ex-supervisor, who gave me link #2 above, and resigned from her job just before i did (for the same reasons). on a related note, i would also like to give a shout out to my ex-boss, who made all this oh-so relevant to my own life experience.

OldMayfield

Gotta agree with Tim, pretty clear early on it was a hoax, but very well done – all the best of luck to Elyse. Hopefully see her soon on the screen, not just The Chive. Last question – whose handwriting on the white board? Was a guest penman brought in as well?

???

Actually, I've got a few co-workers who spend 90% of their time watching videos instead of doing their work…
the supervisor's only there for 1 hour of their shifts each Friday, and 2.5 hours on Monday morning.
I won't spill the beans, (company, etc, YET)… but, they've gotta get their asses in gear

Anon

To hell with Olivia Munn. She's so damn fake and she gives female gamers a bad rep. She said "I can't play Guitar Hero because I have a vagina" – that is a real, on the air quote from G4.

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