A: Well that all depends on what I am writing about. I am basically a song writer by natures decree. And I have been writing lyrics, and short stories ever since I was a child. When I write anything it is always on a whim. Just like what I am writing here. Nothing is ever planned out or mapped out, I just get a wild hair in my nose and go with it. I don’t ever try and force anything out.

I am kind of all over the map with my thoughts and moods, and like to keep myself bombarded with too many things to do and not enough time in the day to do them (there is a Willie Wonka reference in there somewhere I am sure).

This kind of works for me even though during the process I am always thinking why don’t I just be one of those structured type of people and map out what I am trying to accomplish? Then once I have time to look back and dwell on the situation I realize that it is not in me to be a structured individual. If I tried to be one I would never accomplish anything!

I always tell people that if I were to write an outline for anything whether it be non fiction, or especially a song lyric I would still be sitting there scratching my head trying to come up with my first word. As far as lyrics go, I just do not write them at this moment. This is because I am a happy dude and life is great! I wrote my best stuff way back in the days, mostly the 90s and early 2000s when I was not so much of a happy go lucky kid. Although recently I have been thinking of music and have been trying to figure out if it is possible for me to write lyrics if I am happy and life is good? I now think it is possible but still will not force any of it out. I am perfectly fine never writing another lyric again, especially if I cannot do it unless I am miserable.

I respect the art of writing no matter what style it is. I believe that everyone has the right to write whatever they choose and as long as it is precious to them, then who GAF what anyone else thinks about it. So to answer the question specifically what compels me to write?

I actually have no clue!

I just know that it is something that I cannot NOT do. If I were to be stuck on an island somewhere all by my lonesome, after I would secure my food and shelter of course one of the first things I would do for enjoyment would be to try and figure out some way that I could express the thoughts of the two little drunk hamsters playing hopscotch in my head. I would seriously be out on the beach with a stick drawing stick figures and writing lyrics or poetry of some kind in the sand. Purely for my own enjoyment.

Hey, that is the answer!

I write purely for my own enjoyment on whatever topic that I choose to do so. Our own thoughts are something that no one but God (or whatever you believe in) can ever take away from us. I really treasure that and respect the art of writing in all forms.

Q: Your author’s bio page says that you use many different pen names. Why do you use so many different pen names?

The reason that I have written in several pen names was to keep certain sides of me separated from each other. This was my initial thought process as I enjoy writing on so many different topics that are miles and miles apart from each other. I can write recipe cookbooks because I seriously love to cook, then next write a kids book based on my two dogs because I am just a big kid, then next write a stupid little parody or a slap in the face type of how to make money with XYZ that can get offensive to people, because I like to throw mud at shyster marketers for enjoyment. I also am interested in more serious topics as well. Then of course I have my heavy metal lyrics that are out in left field. And so on and so on.

I write based on my moods and interests. I have a wide variety of interests as do most people and I do not set boundaries for myself nor do I fear ridicule for writing on a variety of subjects. I did not want to offend people and also I did not want to bring over the haters to other sides of me initially. Now I sort of no longer care. In a nutshell that is sort of the reason for using different pen names to write in. I just did not want to confuse people, and also did not think people would believe that the same person was writing all of these things anyways.

People tend to assume that everyone is a 1 trick pony in this world. And generally they would be correct.

I still believe that a female pen name would be best for recipe books as far as generating the most sales goes. And hot young college girls totally can kill it on YouTube in the recipe department whether they can cook or not.

More than likely not.

This is just the way it is. So I used to write them and use female pen names in order to get them sold. I now use my own name as I have my own little niche within a niche that I have created for myself and have a big enough group of buyers now that I can sell my own recipe books with my own little style and 2 cents added to them.

I also have started publishing female recipe writers as well in 2014 and can focus my own writings to further myself in niches that I want to be in as my own self. I have no fear of putting my two cents in on a topic that I am interested in. I have many other topics that I would probably be considered an “expert” in that I would never even write about. Why? This is because I have no interest in doing so. Nor would the subject matter be lucrative which in the end is what keeps the electricity on in order to do anything at all in the first place.

At some point in 2014 I really stepped way back for a bit and wanted to reevaluate this “venture” and decide if this all was going to be a path that I can take in order to get me to where I want to be in life? See, I sort of backed into self publishing. I was not one of those kids who troll YouTube at 3 am searching for get rich quick schemes. And make no mistake about it, this business has turned into a get rich quick business filled with lying hucksters luring wide eyed kids into believing they can become millionaires while lying back in their hammocks being fed grapes from a vine and ordering around slaves to do their dirty work for them.

Or something similar to that!

I will not go off on a rant about that here as it would take up too much space. But initially all that I really wanted was to find an affordable way that I can format two copies of some of my more poetic lyrics into paperback so that my brother and I could each have one. That is all that I wanted to do. At that time I had given up on my musical aspirations and had note pads on top of note pads of decades worth of chicken scratch that I was beginning to forget not just my own lyrics but also the riffs that go along with them. I had hundreds and hundreds of songs and riffs all in my feeble little mind and they were beginning to fall out of my ears.

So basically I did not start thinking of this as a business until sometime in 2014 to be honest, even after I had already written dozens of titles in non fiction and fiction. I was basically writing for my own enjoyment and to get certain things off of my chest. I had no concept of the importance of all of the marketing tactics that I absolutely hate. I just wrote about what I wanted to write about. And still do by the way I am just a smarter-er marketer… er.

Self publishing is BRUTAL!

It is not the cake walk that those vultures are telling these kids it is. You work on your business 24/7! And that goes for those who have never even written one of their own words. If you write then you work 25/8! I tell these kids this SHTUFF all day long. Often it is as if I am talking to a door knob though.

Live Poor Get Rich is a mantra that I live by and will live by until the day that I die. And I will be dying filthy freaking rich too! This is part of my own little niche within a niche that I have settled into and something that separates me from the herd of marketers.

I am just a normal dude and am only capable of marketing myself as myself. In 2014 I realized that in order for me to live my dream one day which is sharing my music with the world on my own terms. That I needed to figure out the proper path(s) to take that would get me to where I needed to be.

My dream is not to sit in front of a computer for 18 hours a day even if I love what I am doing. And coming from a dude who was a Mason for 15 years I absolutely do love doing what I am doing compared to that crap! I will gladly do it with bells on even as it will get me to where I need to be in order to one day live my personal dream.

And it will happen.

Then I can also write on topics that I really want to write about which I know that will possibly sell like 1 or 2 copies (unless I am really famous) but I will not care. So I am now more focused than ever on creating my own little brand that is basically myself as that is all that I really know how to be. I have only begun to scratch the surface and love every single minute of what I am fortunate enough to be doing. I am very blessed and keep my eye on the prize 24/7.

Q: What kind of education do you have in health and fitness?

A:Edjumacation you say?

Well my knowledge in health and fitness is basically based on the trials and errors that I have gone through myself. To me that is more important than any kind of certificate anyone can have. I personally do not pose as any kind of guru or coach of any type. I do not carry around my own little soap box to stand on. I just give real world advice based on what I do and how I see things.

My books in the health niches are conversations, they are not lectures or copy and pasted jargon that I pulled off of a Google search in order to have filler that is different looking than my other filler. I just talk off of the top of my head and use my own self as a walking billboard.

I feel this is what everyone should do. I am friends with actual real life “Doctors” who are far more smarterer than me is who listen to me and treat me as an equal (at least to my mug) and will converse with me about nutritional subjects.

They do so because they know that I just live what I say I do and walk my talk. If I started smoking crack tomorrow I would start telling everyone hey I smoke crack now and it has helped me get down under 10% body fat!

Ok ok, one of the “Doctors” I know is a ChiroQuaktor. And the other one is a Dentist. And the other one is a Plastic Surgeon. Hahaha! Whats funny is that the ones that went to Med school actually know less about nutrition than the one that didn’t.

I am the proud self proclaimed leader of the ANTI GURU, ANTI FAD, AND ANTI INTERNET SPAM COMMUNITY. I also believe that more real world advice and less memorized jargon gets actual results. I am not a preacher, or a teacher. I am just a reacher. I reach out to those who are wanting to join me not those fighting over who gets to wash my stinky feet. I can wash my own feet. There are plenty of guru’s out there who just love feet attention so they can have the sheep looking for miracles. I am sure that all makes perfect sense right???????

NOT!

Q: What separates your books from other books about diet and fitness?

A: What separate my books in those niches are this: 1 – I write my own books. 2 – I not only use myself as a guinea pig, but also live what I say I live and use myself as a walking billboard. 3 – I do not push fads, or the latest greatest piece of machinery that will add years to our lives guaranteed for only 3 easy installments of $29.99. 4 – I do not place affiliate links inside of my eBooks or newsletters hocking every single dumb clickbank type of course that push fads that contradict other fads that I am also pushing on the other side of my pie hole. 5 – I gear them towards average everyday people who have jobs and live a non pampered life. I can keep going but I think those are the main things that separate me from others. The business is about pushing fads and lies. It does not matter if any of them are useful or if any of them are even safe for people to use. As long as they are sellable they will be forced onto the masses by the companies at the top of the ant hills. And the little worker ants will be there always trying to mimic them in order to gather the scraps left behind. I just like to do my thing and steer clear of all that nonsense.

Q: What are some misconceptions about veganism?

The biggest misconception that I personally had about veganism is that all vegans are nice people! Haha! That is a little jab at those who dismiss me in the vegan cult… I mean community.

I am personally not a vegan. I call myself a vEGGan. I do eat eggs solely based on the b12 aspect. I have my own reasoning for that. I promote veganism if done correctly purely based on the animal cruelty aspects. I want to do my small part to promote animal cruelty awareness.

I know how to be a healthy meat eater as do so many other people. We can all be an unhealthy eater of any type of “diet” vegan included. I surprisingly have had more vegans dismiss me than meat eaters and even paleo zealots which is hilarious considering how much I make fun of paleo. All in good taste though. I just poke fun at things sometimes.

But the vegan bandwagon these days is filled with wannabe pied pipers who all are fighting to be the Mr. Miyagi of the movement. I just like to sit back in my lawn chair and observe. I wonder how many of them will still be vegan in 5 years once they realize it is a lot harder to make money off of it than they once thought it was?

I will continue to push the animal cruelty awareness and hope that more people will do so as well.

Watch Earthlings and then come back to me and tell me that humans in general are not evil in nature. I am not against consuming flesh to utilize as fuel. If we are forced to kill and eat something in order to not die then we must do what we must do right? But we do not need to consume flesh in order to live. If we have a computer to read this then we have access to an abundance of actual foods that are real fuel for our body. Dead rotting animal flesh is not fuel. The body will turn it into fuel if it needs to (jargon free zone here). But like I said, I know how to be a healthy meat eater as do so many people. It is not so much about the health aspects to me.

People in general do not want to be scolded on health topics. I deal with this all the time and have basically proven this to myself. In fact just 2 days ago a young girl like 19 or so at my gym dismissed me pretty quickly after I just opened my pie hole for like 2 minutes on health topics that she was the one who initially asked me a question on. She has no clue who I am and to her I am just some dumb dude at the gym (which I am). She did not want to hear what I was saying. I honestly could not care any less and will never try and give her any advice ever again even if she begged me too. But this is kind of human nature especially in this know it all world we live in.

People want fads pushed onto them. Fads and over the top hype and lies. This is just a fact. It is not anyones fault either, this is just what we have had imbedded into our brains over time. We even acknowledge this and still will lean towards the hype and fads. Once the blood suckers figure out that money can be made from something it will be turned into a fad and destroyed.

I started a little Facebook group called The 90/90 Way Of Life that no one cares about. It is just based on my beliefs that a 90% vegan diet if done correctly for each individual will help a person hopefully live to the ripe old age of 90. I just tell people to eat 90% vegan for the animal cruelty aspects only. The health aspect of it will be like icing on the tofu cake!

I have noticed that many people hear the word veganism, or even vegetarianism and view it as a cult or some kind of fru fru club. It comes off as a bad word to many people and some vegans make it worse with their elitist attitudes. Or on the other side of the coin you have got the trust fund tree hugging children with nothing better to do than to rattle empty cages and rabble rouse.

It is what it is and I just keep my mind focused on the animal cruelty aspects and push that in as entertaining of a way as I possibly can.

Q: What kind of a day job do you have and how does it affect your writing?

A: At this very moment this is my day job. Well at least it is where the bulk of my bill money comes from. I like to separate writers, from authors, from publishers. This is purely my own thinking and I am sure that many people will totally disagree with me. But these are just my own views and experiences that I am basing this thinking on.

Don’t hate me writers as I am one of you!

I did not make any money until I started viewing this venture as a business. Out of those three the publisher is the one that makes the most money in my eyes. Now as a writer/author/self publisher/nit whit I needed to start thinking of myself as more of a PUBLISHER if I wanted to make this one of the paths to take that will lead me to where I want to ultimately end up.

So that is what I did.

I have put my several hundred thousand (and possibly over a million to date and counting) words out from my pea brain to my finger tips to the judgmental world for all to see. Whether people think my words are worth a hill of beans or not does not matter to me. I suffered and put in the hard work. I can call myself an author and do so with my chin up over the bar.

So to keep this thing short and sweet, when I decided to TEACH MYSELF the marketing and publishing side of things I was able to see that I could make a really good living with this and have invested most of my time and of course $$$$$ into this source of income.

I want to have many sources of income and am always looking for more that are legitimate, lucrative, and doable. I know all of the BS online and don’t fall for any of it. This business that I am in here is a get rich quick business that will not pan out for most of the wide eyes kids diving in. Hopefully they don’t destroy it for people like myself who do it correctly. This is why I swear by the Live Poor Get Rich mantra. It is because we never know when we can lose it all.

I want to generate income 24 hours a day on and off line and create multiple sources of income for myself that do not interfere with the main sources of income. One of my sources of income is my Real World Nutritional Consulting that I do. Emphasis on the “Real World”. This is mainly a local thing that I can do 1 on 1 with someone. I show people how to cross their I’s and dot their T’s (wait a minute! Strike that. Reverse it. There is my Willie Wonka reference! I can’t leave without doing at least one.) as far as getting their own nutrition on point for how they want to live.

I can show them how to shop for groceries correctly and thrive on healthy foods for under $50 and yes even $30 a week. I am currently working on both the $50 a week and $30 a week plans to either have as a full on course or either present them in eBook and paper back formats for people to utilize as they see fit within their schedule and life. I still have not figured out how I want to get those out there, but I am always putting up recipes that will go with both of those plans for free on my YouTube channel. People will just have to put up with my low quality, non edited, non infomercially, candid, childish behavior. Oh ya, and my turtle Morla The Ancient One. He makes special guest appearances from time to time.

One day I want write a kids book on the story of his life as it is a pretty cool one. I wrote a kids book based on two dogs that passed away for my nephews and niece. I intended on making it a series and hope to continue it someday. My family keeps telling me to do it but the kids books are just not very sellable for me even though The Hilarious Adventures of Jass & Marble made the Amazon best sellers list both in the USA and Canada in eBook format. It basically has died off and sells very little now days. I wish that it would rise from the dead so that I can get a little motivation to get into the kids book writing as I am just a big kid myself and totally would love to write kids stuff regularly.

To get back to your question, the day “job” that I had when I first started writing was one that I wrote a little guide book for. It was on how to do simple watch repairs for profit. I still do simple watch repairs locally currently. Although I do very little and only for the clientele that have been regulars for the years that I have been doing it. I backed into watch repairs as well. I am not a watch maker or even aspire to become one. I can only do simple watch repairs like batteries, links, gaskets, stems, and a few other minor repairs that don’t involve getting into the mechanisms of the watches. Nothing that a dip stick like me cannot do! And if I can do it anyone can do it.

So I wrote that little guide book in 2013 sometime in my spare time as I was in the middle of doing watch repairs. I wrote dozens of books as I was doing watch repairs. I am one of those people that gets ideas as I am doing things and even more so if I am taking multitasking and putting it on steroids. If I stop and relax my brain does as well for some reason? It gets annoying at times but when I look back later I have fond memories to hold onto of how things transformed and came about. These are memories that I cherish. Hopefully others have memories such as these and will cherish them also.

So to answer your question better, my day job currently is my publishing business which I am focused on the most. My Live Poor Get Rich Mentality allows me to do this.

I live well below my means in order to one day live out my dreams (hey that rhymes! I am a poet and didn’t even know it! That rhymes too! Why am I screaming?!).

And I have a handful of other sources of income both on and offline and searching for more. On my white board right now is a list of 10 sources of extra income that I want to generate 10 thousand dollars PROFIT from each one of those by the end of 2015. This is extra income that I do not want to count. Will they all hit the 10 thousand PROFIT mark by 2016? A little birdy on one shoulder says yes, and the other little birdy on the other shoulder has been put into a headlock by the other birdy so he is silent for the time being.

Q: You have been on the Amazon Best Sellers List, how did you promote your books to get it there?

A: It is actually pretty easy to get books on an Amazon best sellers list legitimately or not. And trust me, so many of these gerbils and weasels out there are just gaming the system. To me getting on a best sellers list is not important. Now if the book were to stay on it forever then that would be important to me.

But the more money you can throw at promotions the better chances you have of hitting a best sellers list of course. And of course the more money you have, the better connections you have. And the better connections you have, the better promotions you have access to, and the “who you know” snow ball keeps on rolling from there. And where I come from its not even necessarily who you know its who you… well I will leave that one up to the imagination.

I have had several of my books hit a best sellers list and I know people that have all of them hit it. They are more than likely paying for email list promotions and/or have a big one of their own to send the books to as they launch. Some people have huge lists that they can basically just let them know a new book is launching and the list will go and support the author by purchasing their eBook usually but sometimes a paper back.

Most of these things are geared towards eBooks. They can launch them for just $0.99 and generate a large amount of downloads in a short period of time and voila, you have got your best seller. Pretty simple really. Like I said it is not really important at least to me to get on a best sellers list unless 1 – I make a decent profit while it is there, or 2 – it stays there for a long period of time which will obviously make me a large profit hopefully. That is the most important thing to me from the business side of things.

I have had a handful though that made a best sellers list completely without any promotional work at all which is cool! In fact 1 I am thinking of in particular which has since tapered off and is now back down to earth went nuts one day with sales completely out of nowhere. I am not making this up. I have no clue how it sold so many in less than 2 hours to be honest. I don’t ever tell people what I make, or have made, or throw out numbers like these weasels do (they are flat out lying by the way) so I will never say what it made in sales. But it was a crazy amount and enough to really make a difference in my authors profile and generate sales for some of my other titles in the same niche.

It was very cool and I am blessed to have had it happen to me. Some of that stuff is pure luck in my opinion. But for people that are just wanting to see one of their books on a best sellers list in order to just say they were there I would say this. First, be in a niche that is not so crazy competitive. It has to be competitive enough to generate interest but not a genre with a zillion books in it. Second, work on building your list while looking for others with a similar list already built. They may or may not sell advertising to their list. The reputable advertisers will only sell you ad space if your book fits into their specific list’s wants.

Most of my types of books wont even be accepted by these people selling advertising to their lists. Now if I were a famous author or I just constantly kissed their butts, then I am sure they would accept everything from me but then again if I were a famous author I would not need their list right? See, we as small time self pubs are somewhat stuck in between a rock and a boulder. That is why I say create your own brand, your own style, and put the pedal to the metal and go all in with it.

I know one thing is for sure. And that is that the difference between fiction and non fiction is like night and day. I would love to write more fiction as my non fiction is often described as fiction, mainly because I get bored with jargon and have a wild imagination. But if I were to dedicate myself to writing fiction on a regular basis I would need to go back and get one of them J.O.B. things that I have had since I was 14 and have finally gripped and clawed my way out of knock on wood (my head).

I would be a mentally broken dude probably making good hourly wage earner money still as a Mason breaking my back and getting older by the second writing short stories in the middle of the night in a drunken stupor. I love fiction writers and have their mentality. They are the ones who suffer for their art. I have got a weird thing where I love people who suffer for things. I identify with the fiction writers of the world.

I am a song writer forever and that is what I will be known for. I do what I have to do in order to reach my destination. But I also do it as myself and encourage others to do the same. If you are trying to get your fiction book that you slaved away on for 15 years on a best sellers list then surround yourself with fiction writers who are best sellers or at least hiking up the same treacherous path that you are. It is tough to break into those inner circles. And it is even tougher as a small timer to find the ones that aren’t complete bull crap get rich yesterday nonsense. So let’s all get on our knees and wish upon a star!

Q: What is the Brown Bagin Blues about?

A: The Brown Bagin (with one G misspelled on purpose) Blues is loosely and not loosely based on a real person, with real characters, and real stories that actually did happen in some sort of way. Some of the stories were embellished of course while others were watered down. And the ones that you may think were embellished were actually the ones watered down and vice versa.

People are crazy in this world and for some reason I have had the opportunity to be around so many of the crazy ones in my lifetime that I have got books that could be written until the end of days. Or at least the end of my days. I was working downtown in my city where it is flooded with crazy people of all kinds like the downtowns of most bigger cities. The main character was a homeless old man that hung around the area where I was working and I had befriended him. I observed him for several years and just took notes on conversations we had and also things that he would do through

out the day. I originally had planned on the book being at least 3 times longer as I have got stories on top of stories that are all true that to me would have made the read redundant. So I made it a short story somewhere in between 10 and 15 thousand words. I forget the word count. It is basically a day in the life of a very talented old schizophrenic drunk with a good heart and desire to not be alive anymore.

I tried to portray him as he was while not putting him down or demeaning him in any way. I am like a broken record when I say “it is what it is”. And this one is an “it is what it is” type of story. I like to be my own man and went waaaaaay out on a limb and wrote the story as I wanted to read it. Many people told me I was crazy as I am not an established fiction writer and should stick to the usual template of what I call “he said she said” writing.

Well so far the overwhelming majority of people really like how I wrote it as somewhat of a movie script or a play (wheeew). Even I had to wipe the sweat off my brow every single time I would go and check the reviews (which was like 10 times a day).

Q: What inspired you to write it?

A: I am an observer (not a voyeur) by nature. I have always observed the world from a distance and am drawn to the odd and unusual things in it. Basically my inspiration for writing The BBB was the simple fact that we were both in the same place at the same time. I carry around little note pads with me 24/7 so if it were not him then I would have found something else to doodle about. He just made it so stinking easy for me!

I seriously had enough stories to write a long winded over redundant novel that would have really annoyed everyone senseless if they could sit through the entire thing. The guy was basically a chapter a day. And I would only have short conversations with him at best. I basically just observed him from a distance.

Q: Who are some of your writing influences?

A: Like I said I am a song writer. So my biggest writing influences are going to be song lyrics writers who I looked up to in my youth as a dumb punk kid. And I really don’t have too many to be honest. Although I absolutely respect the art of writing.

I respect all writers of any genre whether it is technical structured writing, or creative writing styles. I do not worship humans or even have idols really. But if there was one guy that I wanted to be when I was a youngster it was James Hetfield. He is THE MAN in my eyes as far as being the best at what he does. The lyrics to Fade To Black off of Metallica’s Ride The Lightning record are in my eyes the greatest collection of words that I personally have ever soaked in. Mamma Said is a close second but for me it was Fade To Black that inspired me to start doodling on note pads and eventually fall in love with guitar playing as well.

It’s kind of funny as I am currently guinea pigging a YouTube strategy for myself to see if it actually works and that is that I am putting up 1001 videos (the lower quality the better) before 2015 is over. So I need lots of filler! And I started a bucket list playlist which will hopefully fill up space so I can actually reach my goal of 1001 videos. And the number 1 thing on my bucket list would be to meet James Hetfield. Not to worship him or idolize him as I don’t do that kind of stuff. But just to pick his brain a little and get some advice and his opinions on a few things.

I think Dave Mustaine would be cool to meet as well. He is another one of my writing influences as a kid. There are other musicians as well but those two are the main ones that I would even mimic their antics and facial expressions as I butchered their music. It’s funny that my entire life and even to this day when it comes to those two bands Metallica and Megadeth fans will love one band and hate the other with a passion. I have always liked both bands equally and learned so much from both of them.

Please note; Eliza’s interviews are done by email. All answers are unedited and come right from the lovely fingertips of her subjects:)