Sunday, August 02, 2015, 1:31 p.m.

Shorty Smalls - Little Rock

About this place

The name Shorty Small's has nothing to do with the length of the casual eatery's menu or the size of the portions.Shorty Small, for those who don't want to take time out from devouring and drinking to actually read the facetious menu fashioned like a newspaper, is a fictional saloon owner (how'd he have time to run a business with all his womanizing?).Eating plenty of "plain folks' food" the vertically challenged man "jus' kept on expan'in' ... and expan'in' and expan'in ...." After two recent meals at the bustling west Little Rock and North Little Rock locations, we think we know how Shorty felt.Shorty Small's does offer several respectable lighter choices. There is Broiled Salmon ($12.99) (maybe have them leave off the butter) and there are several salads ($7.99-$8.99) (maybe have them put the dressing on the side and hold the Southern fried chicken). But be warned they're going to look seriously boring next to your neighbors' beastly brick of fried onion tangles (Shorty's Famous Onion Loaf, $5.99), served with chipotle ranch dip and dramatic flair with a knife lodged in it. And so are you.

For the parents: Okie Pig Nachos, ($8.49), Honey Mustard Chicken Club ($7.69), French Dip Melt ($7.99), Pork Salad Annie ($8.99), Mushroom Cheeseburger ($7.79), Chicken Parmigian ($10.79), Gulf Shrimp Quesadilla ($9.99), Chicken Fried Steak ($13.50), Shorty's World Famous Ribs ($16.99) and much, much more. For the youngsters: Children eat free on Monday nights with the purchase of an adult meal. The menu includes chicken strips, grilled cheese, catfish, minicorn dogs, or pizza for $3.99, a cheeseburger for $4.25, or ribs for $7.99. Meals are served with fries, a drink, and a Fudgesicle.