Wow!!! It’s been forever since I’ve posted here! I have a new horse, Callista has debuted at Prix St. Georges, I’m still battling the weight but exercising!!! 18 lbs. down since November…still a way to go!!!

Thought you would enjoy photos of Delhia! She’s a chestnut, 2003, just about 17 hand Oldenburg mare by Domiro {Donnerhall} out of a Wolkenstein II {Weltmeyer} mare. She’s already bucked me off! Mercifully, I am largely unhurt, although my confidence is certainly on the rocks. it was also lucky that the toss occurred AFTER I showed her for the first time…

Much to share again. I have finally debuted at Fourth Level Test Two. The judge summed it up best in her comments: “It’s a start…’ I went off course twice and only got one of the three tempi changes. On the bright side? Rafi never felt better! We’re really forging a partnership now and it carried itself back home after the double and spurs were put away until the next show. She’s more obedient, my half halts are getting better and my seat SEEMS to be improving.

We still have some work to do on the tempi’s…she wants to ignore my right leg aid in them,,,so we are working in a lot of zig zags and half passes in all the gaits to zero in on my weaker side and her less than wonderful submission to the said weak side. I’m convinced we’ll get it.

I ordered a shad belly….due to still needing to lose MORE weight and the fact that nature has endowed me significantly in the bosom department, I couldn’t get a fit in an off the rack jacket. Like my boots, I have to go custom. It takes up to 12 weeks, so I’m being optimistic, placed the order and still hope to do Prix St. Georges in April. Looks like it will be a race between which gets here first…the jacket or my riding…

I have decided that the Christmas horse will be sold. I love Arie, but between his size and strong-minded personality, I feel he’s not an ideal horse for me. Hopefully, his sale will make a nice nest egg for another Rafi type horse. At my age, I’m finding I no longer want to wait on developing a youngster. They are always a gamble {as is any horse!}, but I want to ride NOW. Having passed my 59th birthday last week, riding in the present has become more important than the future. So Arie is for sale….I recommend him for the experienced rider.

So the new year has come and new goals are set. Resolutions are being worked on. One is to up my actual hours of exercise {outside riding} to two hours a day/ six days a week. That starts tomorrow as I’ve been sick since New Year’s Eve! But this feels very do-able.

Show next week. Doing Fourth Two again. Oh, and Callista is up to 30 minutes of trotting and we expect to be able to add canter next week! She’s doing great!

Nothing like arriving at the barn this morning to find a pushy goofy 17.2 hand five-year old with a suspicious inflammation right near the left front suspensory to make your day!!! Had the vet out, of course, ASAP.Luckily the ultrasound showed no damage. Dr. Gray thought he may have bumped himself some how and inflamed the area. Back to work he can go, with precautionary icing for the week and keeping an eye out for any unsoundness….

Whew!!! The thought of a big, happy-go-lucky five-year old on stall rest for any length of time was giving me the willies all day! Am happy to have worried for naught…

Callista has been having fabulous progress since the last show. She’s learning her piaffe now and is getting some nice steps. She still needs to “sit down” more but the steps are lovely, lively and regular. I have high hopes for her! She’s also learning to canter on the spot. That’s how good her collection is getting. I think her pirouettes are going to be quite lovely…

....my beautiful Callista

I am not quite sure why these photos won’t go where I put them….but you get the idea!

Rafi and I are really have great work this week too! We’re working on compression and the whole notion of the transitions working like an accordion. It is a blast to bring her to piaffe and/or passage and then send her out to a lively medium or into a really well-connected shoulder-in. We were rocking today in the canter, too. I’m really starting to get some of the same collection there. Consequently, my half passes and flying changes are getting to a new place. I seem to have a better handle on her overall straightness this week, too!

We got back to NY on Saturday!!! Home sweet home! I am really glad to be back. Won’t see the horses until next week though! That blows! Just glancing through my files to see if there’s a photo to share:

another fromthe last show...this is a better photo of our Third Three canter halfpass...

I did two piggy backed shows this weekend. Rafi was a saint and I felt like we really had the goods at Third Three Saturday afternoon.

Too bad the judge didn’t see it the same way. Another crucifixion! And what I felt was neither anger or the wallowings of a pity party. I just felt sad…..disappointed…and the stirrings of discouragement… Should I just stay home and ride? Just skip the showing nonsense all together? My trainer was even surprised by the score. It was a much better ride than the previous show, with Rafi steadier on the bit and developing better impulsion.

Sunday I was not a happy camper. I think I hid it pretty well. I am despite my big mouth, a relatively introverted soul. I like sharing the good stuff but prefer to hide the bad. But the stress certainly zapped my energy and enthusiasm about putting myself out there for another round of criticism. I toyed with scratching. Believe me, I’m no quitter. But when that little ache of discouragement begins seeping into your heart, the self-consciousness, the poor body image, the time and money you’ve shelled out…all these and more take their toll on your psyche!

But, as I’ve said, I’m no quitter. Sunday afternoon I mounted up, minus my normal excitement and even minus my usual show nerves. I was rather deflated. Rafi, probably sensing my lethargy, seemed stiff and slightly tuned out. I worked on just focusing on her and began the walk work using suppling half halts and silently cheerleading myself into ramping up the energy in and for the pair of us. By the time we’re cantering, my usually balanced riding mindset was beginning to return. We worked individual parts of the test and then balanced the right canter more. Back to the trot to address the stiff left rein, back to the forward work again. By the time I was to enter the ring, I was composed enough, if not thrilled, to ride my class.

It was trotting the perimeter when I began experiencing a glimmer of anger. It seemed to me that I was alternating between the miffed adversarial annoyance with the judges on the whole {totally unfair of me…but I was in a bad mood and needed to BLAME someone for it!} and this silly “I no longer give a damn!” attitude that my mind had anchored itself to. Yeah, I was pretty upset and couldn’t believe that I was about to put myself out there again for abuse and this time with Gary Rockwell, an “O” level judge. Was I out of my mind???

The whistle blew and Jen called out, “Enter A…” Yes, I had a reader. I was so stressed that day, I couldn’t keep the test straight even when sitting in a chair with the book open on my lap! I was lingering at the “A” end of the ring as I had observed Mr. Rockwell admonishing riders in earlier classes that their time to enter was slipping by quickly and I simply did not want that comment as the last words heard before going down the centerline.

And then it happened.

I turned my heel to lightly tap Rafi forward and up into the collected trot. She was there for me. We halted and saluted and off we went. And fiercely, as I turned left at “C,” I WANTED IT. I wanted to ride this test as well, as forward, as correctly as I could! Rafi and I began to rev up our engines. The first medium trot went by….she’s a horse whose collected work is her strong point, not the extended….but this was the most trot I had sat on her since I purchased her. The shoulder-in was there, the two half circles lost a bit of energy but I had her back for the half pass. The extended trot…felt like I had even more with an honest glimmer of a transition to collected trot. Against my hand a bit in the rein back. Took my time and tried to discretely supple her poll….reinback…..onto the mirror of the previous lateral work…..felt great getting into the medium walk, turn on the haunches….I’d had them better at other shows, but she was there for me…medium walk into the extended. I think I dropped her slightly at the beginning of the diagonal, but the walk quality felt good….canter! For me this is the best series of exercises within the test….again the medium and extended canter were more than I had ever experienced before, the flying changes, dead on the mark. The canter circle with the uberstreichen was definitely not very good to me….she had gotten a bit down on the forehand making it nearly impossible to display the self-carriage requirement. Off to that great extended canter…down the centerline, trot at “X”, halt at “G”…..a square halt on my aids…

I was back to caring about showing again…..

I broke out of the low fifties into the low sixties….if I could have found Gary Rockwell after my class, he would have been the recipient of the biggest kiss, hug and not a few tears….

I have lost my journaling discipline!!!! It’s to a good cause! I think about what I’d like to share here each day driving home from the barn. But after supper I tend to wilt and fall asleep on the couch….hence very little computer time just now. And I’m tired because I’m working out, riding, and now, unbelievably, in the wondrous process of buying an equestrian property in Florida….add a few horse shows, and I’m a goner at night. If I’m awake, I’m a zombie…

We’re showing this weekend {meaning today, yesterday and tomorrow} at Dressage at Equestrian Estates. This is one of my favorite shows as I find the grounds very horse friendly with its big, open spaces. Most of the horses seem to like this showground.

It’s a quiet show as it’s Easter weekend and many of the northern riders have packed up and gone home. My horses and I will probably leave the third week of May which is fine by me as I enjoy warm weather riding! There’s a rare unhurried, peaceful atmosphere at the DEE this year! A happy show as far as I’m concerned.

All three horses are there competing. Thursday, schooling Rafi, I had possibly the best, most responsive ride on her to date. She was soft, forward, taking my hand, obedient…..it was wonderful!!! Next day {Friday}, I rode Three One for the first time. She felt great, much more on my aids and while I had some odd problems with occasional stiffness, I felt it was a respectable ride. Score crept up a percentage from the last show….guess I’m going to be riding Third Level for a while yet! {she smiles ruefully!} but I was so pleased with the partnership we had.

Callista and Cathy went Four One in the main arena. Despite a rider error and Callista breaking at the canter twice and for one harrowing moment deciding she didn’t want to go forward, they finished under Gary Rockwell’s eagle eye with a 63 and change. Guess he liked her in spite of the troubles. I’m not concerned….Callista is coming along beautifully at home. I expect to see her at Prix St. Georges next winter.

Cathy’s assistant Jen arrived earlier this week and got right to work taking over riding Arie. Today she rode him to Second place in Training 2. I loved her tactful and patient work with him all week. He needed lunging when we arrived at the show Thursday. He was a bit “up.” But she got on him and he settled down nicely after about ten minutes and was very good boy! And how nice that he was so good for her today.

Rafi and Callista only schooled today. Callista looked great. Rafi, however, broke out in a bit of fungus {very common here in Florida}. I rode her for about forty minutes with lots of walk breaks. She seemed a little sluggish….not sure if the fungus, the heat or just day 3 away from home hit! If the fungus looks worse tomorrow I may scratch her….we’ll see.

If all goes well, we’ll take another swipe at Three 3 and Cathy will take Callista Four One again as the show is offering a test of choice class….wish they would offer it every day as the Jim Brandon shows do. Would have loved to have ridden Three 3 everyday…oh well. Next show I will do so!

I’ll try to get a wind up on the weekend on Monday! Happy Easter All! Have I mentioned that I’m in love with the canter work in Three 3???

Just posting briefly as any second now the PC will be snatched away from me by my dearest hubby to do some work….

Thanks to everyone for checking in on me….went from the back and boob sprain into a nasty bout of bronchitis! Have much to share here about the ups and downs of Dressage in February….

A little peek: The Christmas Horse was the high score winner at the Palm Beach Derby!!!!! That was the huge up of this past show which, alas, has to be linked with the great sorrow of Courtney King’s traumatic injury…Can’t get it out of my mind and hope everyone is sending thoughts and wishes of love and healing to her and her family! My heart just grieves so for Jason!

I was able to ride this weekend but opted not to show as I was not yet 100% out of the woods….but enjoyed schooling on the grounds! Back to my usual schedule this week! Hoping to keep the weight I dropped during my time out of commission and boy, I NEED to do some cardio…I was huffing and puffing this weekend while riding!

Will show this weekend no matter what….better a low score than no score, as my friend Mary Beth points out! Third 3!!! Yikes…I’ve spent the last 2 months prepping Third 1!!! And ended up scratching all the shows that I was supposed to ride that test in!!! But I welcome a challenge and there are elements in Third Three that I like…notably, getting the medium and extended trot done early in the test! I never liked the Third One challenge of that final extended canter, collected trot at C and right around the bend into the final extended trot……both Rafi and I are extended trot challenged!!! I much prefer getting the trot work behind me and relaxing into the canter work where I feel we have a little shine….NOT Bling….just a touch of semi-gloss….in a muted pastel shade….maybe more of a satin finish…..

Friday. Arie trailers over to the show grounds with BeSe. He hesitated getting on the trailer, he was offered a carrot and then stepped on! Very good boy!

Callista, however, has decided to be alpha mare extraordinaire. Cathy’s warmup is slightly fraught with submission issues. Callista would rather not be both up and round, thank you very much! Cathy wins in the end but the test is not the best. Judges comments weren’t good. Back to the drawing board…..but hey, this is the first Third Level for Callista….we’ve got all winter…

Kassie schools Arie. Overall I’m very pleased. He’s up but attentive to the rider and it’s a very busy show….he has one bad moment when the tractor is being driven toward him and there are no horses nearby….but I safely can chalk that up to inexperience and youth. He’s being a good boy!

Rafi and I school in the early afternoon. VERY busy warm up as four rings are showing and the CDI is going on in the covered arena with its adjacent CDI warmup right next to us. Rafi was very up. This is our first outing in two years….she’s high and I confess I’m a bit on edge. Took me a little while to really get warmed up properly. Just maneuvering and steering in this big ring was its own challenge. But I really got her going with great forward energy surging into my seat and hands. By the end of our school, I was beginning to get used to the traffic and really focusing on my riding. We had super canter work, but I was not as happy with the trot work. Seat, SEAT, SEAT !!!

Saturday morning, life at the show began to change. I arrived about 10:30 am as everyone had later rides. Kassie is cleaning stalls and is just pushing the wheelbarrow out of Rafi’s stall and there is a huge quantity of hay mixed in with the shavings. Rafi hasn’t eaten her breakfast hay, nor for that matter, the night-time hay….this is a little ominous as Rafi is the classic easy keeper and we have particularly good hay this winter!

I’m watching her….she’s a little over affectionate. We get her out for a short walk. I’m to ride her in an hour or two. We all traipse over to watch Kassie ride the Brentina Cup qualifier……then we were to do Arie and Rafi.

I get back and Rafi looks lethargic and unhappy. We temp her….99.9. I watch for a while debating getting the vet. You know what…better safe than sorry….the mare is not right!

Kassie rides Arie. Today he is definitely an overwhelmed gigantic 4-year-old. It was a thirty minute ride and he spent 25 of it in the air…..he cleared the arena and earned Kassie a cheering squad in the bleachers for sheer sticking to saddle power….he was huge, he was frightened by the on coming cantering horses…..he was very “4”! Kassie deserves a medal for finally getting him on the aids and behaving albeit with a giraffe’s neck.

In the middle of this I had walked back and forth from the barn and the ring. Rafi needed the vet. Off to the show office I go and luckily the show vet is one I use often down here and knows my horses. Back to the barn, passing Kassie and Arie finally schooling in a more courteous and suitable manner…

In the tent our other working student is saddling Callista for her second try at Third 3. I’m supposed to read for Cathy. Fortunately, my good friend Mary Beth is stopping by our stalls and takes over the reading. The vet has arrived. Rafi’s gut sounds are sluggish and one side of her abdomen look slightly distended. She is dehydrated.. Banamine and tubing are next.

Everyone troops off to watch Cathy and Callista. I stay behind and play vet tech. We lightly tranquilize her, do a rectal exam to make sure everything inside where it belongs and get the tubing up her nose to put electrolytes and fluids into her. I get to hold the tube in place. The mare is an absolute angel….

Everyone comes back….Callista was a bit balky in the warm up they all tell me. But the test went well. Better comments from this judge but still low scores.

We groom, watch the last rides of the day. I linger through supper feeding to eyeball Rafi. She’s seems good and the vet has advised me to keep her at the show as our barn home is empty which could be more stress than Rafi needed at the moment. He suggests that if she’s chipper in the morning, that I ride her lightly…..He comes back that evening to check on her.

Sunday morning and I’m at the show grounds by 9. Kassie’s first ride is 9:30. I walk in the tent and am told Rafi was fine through the night and seems better. She had eaten more hay. I plan to ride after Kassie’s class.

Kassie does great, I buy a cup of tea and back to the tent I go. Rafi looks remote and her respiration is up. We walk her. I get the vet, a different one this time….same rigmarole, drawing blood, temping, tubing, rectal exam, banamine……It is decided that Rafi will go home on the first trailer out. My poor, poor baby! I am SO stressed by now that there is no point trying to express it.

Kassie gets Arie out again. He’s up but much better behaved…only a couple of leaps…man, oh, man, but he’s a lot of horse!!!

Callista has one more class…..same outcome. This time I read for Cathy and I thought the horse had some good moments…..fortunately so did the judge…still not the scores we usually see, but the comments were dead on and helpful…

I’m rereading what I wrote and it seems a dispassionate recounting. But the show was very tough! And I haven’t tried to journal here as I wasn’t really ready to re-live it.

Today Rafi and I had a great ride. Arie got the day off….he was exhausted when he got home from the show! Callista got a dose of Kassie riding her through some of the issues Cathy did not want to push through at the show. They finished well. We may have Kassie show her next time. It hurts to know that my trainer , who is 68 years old, doesn’t want to risk pushing through stuff. It’s not that she can’t do it, but if a horse acts out and she lands on the ground, her career would be over. Kassie is fearless and 21 and a fabulous rider. So Callista and she will be having some submission discussions over the coming weeks. And me? I get to cool her off…..and that’s fine because I’m not brave enough to push through some of this mare stuff either….

Did I mention how tired I am? I am SO glad to have this show behind us!

Brought Callista and Rafi over to the show grounds late this afternoon. Arie and Cathy’s BeSe will come over tomorrow. Kassie is competing BeSe in the Brentina cup on Saturday and in the Grand Prix on Sunday. Nothing like an amazing 21-year-old to really make you realize how much you don’t know about riding yet!! Keeps one rather humble!

I rode Rafi this morning and had some amazing moments! The seat, the seat, THE SEAT….I was amazed at what I could do when I really accessed her back with my back and seatbones! Of course, it’s very crude just now and I need to build up the amount of time I can keep this new posture of mine….but I think I know where it is and will be able to find my way there again tomorrow!

Today was the first time that I was actually a little happy that I wasn’t competing. This is such a crucial part of the missing ingredients of my riding. I am and have been all this last week or so experimenting with engaging my neutral pelvis…I tend to rotate it back….can you say bubble butt?….My lower back wants to arch and I have to literally re-align it all the time…very tiring as 58 years of not having a neutral pelvis is warring with the last 3 weeks of my insisting that it MUST be neutral and aligned. I think I’m winning the battle….will keep you posted about the war…

I am getting pay-off! I noticed today as I wandered around the show grounds that I was walking with better alignment and felt taller…a very happy illusion!

It is work though, in the saddle…engage the pelvis, yet don’t grip with the gluteous as I rotate it forward…here is the hard part: maintain the neutrality with open hips, lengthening hip flexors without tightening the glutes or grabbing with my quads or allowing my knees to drift forward into chair seat, heels down, toes forward, don’t grip with those thighs!…. At the same time: sit tall, use my abs, drop the shoulders, eyes front, half halt through the core….not the arm or wrist….keep all these without tension! If I’m stiff, the horse will be too…. allow the horse to channel her back through me uninterrupted back to front….send her forward, up and out through the seat….oh, and by the way….all my aids have to be independent from one another…..

No wonder I need a nap when I get home!

Callista goes into her first Third Level class tomorrow. She was just smokin’ today in the warmup! She’s getting more engagement than ever from behind and her neck and shoulders are so supple, so uphill…..her extended gaits and her collected canter were just stellar today. Hope Cathy can get the same stuff tomorrow in the test!

Can’t wait until Arie arrives at the show tomorrow…I’m feeling like he’s going to be a really good boy!