LucasFilm via Everett Collection
It might seem like Disney is taking some big risks with its most precious property, the Star Wars universe. Gareth Edwards — slated to direct a yet unspecified standalone character feature for the franchise — turned in an exceptional Godzilla movie, but still only has one additional directing credit to his name. Chronicle's Josh Trank, recently saddled with a similar gig, was an even more surprising choice for the studio. And now, the coup de gracie: Rian Johnson, one of the most interesting filmmakers playing the genre game these days, will take on writing and directing duties for Star Wars: Episode VIII and Star Wars: Episode IX (per Deadline). It's the biggest task that Disney has yet to bestow upon any of its Star Wars folk, with sci-fi frontman J.J. Abrams only earning the one film, but perhaps the lowest risk of the bunch. If you take a look at Johnson's complete filmography, you'll see what we mean.
BRICK
Focus Features
Johnson's debut feature — a pitch black neo-noir mystery that follows a pre-resurgence Joseph Gordon-Levitt around the underbelly of his high school community looking for the answers to a spiraling mystery. The biggest strength of Brick, beyond some dynamite performances all around (Gordon-Levitt most of all) is a script that reads practically like music. Compare Harrison Ford bemoaning George Lucas' 1977 Star Wars dialogue ("George, you can type this s**t, but you sure as hell can't say it!") with JGL singing the praises of Johnson's poetry ("Brick was a good script just to read. It was like, 'Oh my God, these words feel so good in my mouth.' A lot of movies try to set up a world with cool sets, costumes, camera work. In Brick, the world is born from the words.") and you'll see that maybe a talented wordsmith is exactly what the franchise needs.
LOOPER
TriStar Pictures via Everett Collection
Johnson reteamed with Gordon-Levitt in 2012 for his first science fiction feature, and perhaps the first of his movies to earn something close to widespread recognition. Admittedly, Looper got its share of flack for "time travel problems," as any movie that plays fast and loose with the rules of such a delicate sci-fi staple is bound to. But Looper isn't a bastardization of the tradition, it's a celebration of it: of what makes it fun, interesting, a valuable storytelling device, and worth watching a movie about. Instead of being didactic to the impossible logic of timeline continuity, Johnson was devoted chiefly to the spirit of time travel. This is what we want in a Star Wars director — someone who loves that galaxy far, far away but won't let it arrest his imagination.
BREAKING BAD
AMC
Johnson directed three episodes of Breaking Bad, each a memorable entry in the series' five season run. The first was "Fly" (represented above, as even those unfamiliar might have guessed), Breaking Bad's take on the small screen tradition of the bottle episode, trapping Walter White literally inside of his laboratory and figuratively inside of his decaying mind. Two years later, Johnson helmed "Fifty-One," famous primarily for the climactic scene in which Skyler attempts suicide by jumping into the family's swimming pool. And finally, "Ozymandias," the third-to-last episode of the series and top contender for most celebrated Breaking Bad episode of all.
The director exemplifies such completely different strengths in "Fly" and "Ozymandias" that you'd have to be startled upon learning they were brought to screen by the same artist. In the former, Walt's turmoil reaches out from in, poisoning him (and Jesse) slowly and steadily over the course of the 45-minute ep. "Ozymandias," on the other hand, is a deep dish of adrenaline. From minute one, things are edge-of-your-seat tense, incurring shoot-outs, killings, high speed chases, kidnappings, domestic chaos, the works.
Both sorts of dramatic expertise are needed for any good adventure piece. Johnson can handle subdued tension, internalized drama, and psychological horror. But he also knows what he's doing when it comes to action, adrenaline, and guttural excitement. If nothing else has convinced you that he's a shoe-in for a good Star Wars picture, Breaking Bad has got to do the trick.
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Warner Bros. Pictures
Are monster movies making a comeback? With the latest reboot of Godzilla hitting theaters, and the box office success of Pacific Rim and Clash of the Titans remakes, it seems Hollywood is not only enamored with superheroes who protect cities but with the monsters who want to destroy them. Creature features have been popular since the cult horror films of the '30s, to the Japanese monster or "kaiju" movies of the '50s and the campy onslaught of the '80s. Some have achieved classic status while hundreds of others are laughably bad. In honor of monsters stomping across the big screen again, here are some our favorite freaks.
Godzilla (1954, 1998, 2014)
A product of the nuclear age, Godzilla has wreaked havoc for over six decades, with countless spinoff cartoons, films and toys, but has retained his appetite for destruction. Though the special effects have evolved – from a Japanese man in a rubber suit to animatronic baby lizards in Roland Emmerich’s disposable 1998 reboot – the only thing we fear in this latest rebirth of the kaiju craze is another Led Zeppelin cover by Puff Daddy.
Cloverfield (2008)
In the same way that Godzilla played upon the fears of post-Hiroshima Japan, Cloverfield is truly a creature of post-9/11 anxiety. Having deciding that America needed a metropolis-stomping monster of its own, J.J Abrams teamed up with director Matt Reeves to concoct this found-footage tale of terror. While the jerky cinematography can be straining after an hour, the monster was sufficiently terrifying and the film made us weary of the subway for quite some time.
Pacific Rim (2013)
Don't write off this epic blockbuster as a Transformers lookalike, Pacific Rim manages to serve up a double-dose of giant monsters and equally giant robots to wage battle against them. The influence of Godzilla is apparent throughout the film and director Guillermo del Toro even dedicated the film to the late Ishiro Honda, who directed the original Godzilla. If stylized mayhem is your cup of tea, you'll want seconds with this special-effects masterpiece.
The Cabin in the Woods (2012)
Cabin in the Woods is like a bloody, tongue-in-cheek love letter to every horror movie trope there is, from one of the most beloved nerd auteurs. Joss Whedon flips the script and still manages to scare the crap out of audiences. With cameos galore, a whole fun house of diabolical creatures and twists upon twists, it became a cult classic upon release. Let’s just say we'll think twice about heading to that cabin upstate.
The Host (2006)
One of the most original movie monsters of the early aughts hails from South Korea, from the talented director, Bong Joon-ho. After tainting the Han River with dangerous chemicals, a mysterious creature emerges and attacks the citizens of Seoul. After the creature takes a little girl hostage, it forces her family to take matters into their own hands and take on the monster themselves. One part family drama and one part CGI monster masterpiece, The Host carved out a special place in the hearts of monster-movie lovers everywhere. Some might also recognize the film's heroine Doona Bae from the recent film, Cloud Atlas.
King Kong (1933)
As the forefather of the monster-movie genre, the original King Kong created the blueprint that many other thrillers – be it aliens or dinosaurs – would follow. The not-so-gentle giant created by special effects pioneer Willis H. O'Brien was a monster with heart – even when he was scaling the Empire State Building. Not many films feature a misunderstood monster, but King Kong was an ape of a different color. Peter Jackson's 2005 version did the original justice, but the 1993 classic is a must-see primer for any creature feature fan.
Alien (1979)
A monster movie is only as great as the scare factor of its monsters. A slow reveal is essential, but after you're faced with the beast, it must be compelling enough to terrify us all the way through. Compared to the torture-porn of today's horror, Alien can be considered high art. This space-set operatic tale embedded a nightmare we're still trying to shake off. With Alien, Ridley Scott proved he could create a blockbuster and one of cinema's most butt-kicking heroines in the form of Ripley – immortalized by Sigourney Weaver.
The Thing (1982)
John Carpenter is no Hitchcock, but he certainly knows how to titillate and gross out his audiences simultaneously. Carpenter's remake of Howard Hawks' tense '50s sci-fi thriller The Thing from Another World may lack the subtlety of the original, but it manages to capture the isolation and paranoia that takes over the skeleton crew of an Arctic research station. For monster enthusiasts, there's plenty to geek out over with these shape-shifting alien parasites. Inside of tying up the film with an obvious good-guys-win or everyone-dies conclusion, Carpenter opts for an intelligent ending that's open for interpretation.
The Mist (2007)
The beauty in this post-apocalyptic tale is the slow, steady build of unavoidable terror. It is this type of film where folks are holed up in a grocery store, mall, or (insert consumerist symbol here) and turn 0n each other while facing a greater foe, that makes us imagine backup plans when the world goes to pot. Based on the Stephen King novella, the film boasts an impressive billing for a horror film that includes Thomas Jane, Marcia Gay Harden, and Andre Braugher. Director Frank Darabont shifts the focus to the human protagonists rather than the CGI monsters and was even responsible for uncredited rewrite on the Godzilla 2014 script, which is telling if you've seen both films.
Tremors (1990)
When it comes to taking down giant sand worms, look no further than the dynamic duo of Kevin Bacon and country star Reba McEntire who makes paranoid survivalists seem utterly charming. While the film marked McEntire's acting debut, it was rare for a film star such as Bacon to star in a seemingly B-movie horror flick. But the sharp performances, cheeky dialogue and truly terrifying monsters made the film more than just a midnight movie romp... and it led to four more films!
Clash of the Titans (1981)
Release the Kraken! This epic fantasy tale of Greek mythology is a childhood favorite for many and set the bar for innovative special effects before the dawn of CGI. It featured brave heroes, beautiful heroines, stop-motion artistry and Hollywood heavyweights like Laurence Olivier who brought some gravitas to the film – making a piece of cinematic history whose remakes garnered a new generation of fans.
Gremlins (1984)
A lot of questionable films passed for children's entertainment in the '80s and Gremlins was definitely one of them. Sure, you had your adorable fluffy creatures begging for toy spin-offs, but whatever you do, don't get them wet! While the film had all the trappings of a B-movie, it was also a commentary on all our favorite movie myths – monsters, the holidays, and folklore. Those creatures may have kept us up at night during slumber parties, but they're delightfully campy to watch as an adult.
Predator (1987)
Aliens, terrorists, and fiscal policy – none of these stand a chance against The Arnold. Sure, the Predator closely resembles John Travolta in Battlefield Earth, but at the time it would inspire fear looking back at you on the video store shelf. As one of the many blast-'em-up blockbuster films of the '80s, it's got the advantages of a great monster, an exotic location, and slick action sequences.
Trollhunter (2010)
The found-footage setup lends itself perfectly to monster movies because of the chaotic feeling it creates with camerawork. In the same vein as Blair Witch Project, Trollhunter features plenty of blurry night-vision footage as a group of filmmakers stumble around the snowy Norwegian countryside looking for trolls. The CGI trolls are impressive and there's plenty of hilarious hijinks to be had when you're out hunting for such creatures.
Monsters (2010)
The sub-genre of indie monster movies is a small one, but British director Gareth Edwards proves you can still terrify audiences on a shoestring budget and rely on a human-driven drama rather than special effects to scare. The special effects artist-turned-director was one of the main reasons we were excited for the latest Godzilla effort. With his directorial debut, Monsters, Edwards knows a thing or two about building up a reveal in this futuristic tale of galactic beings trapped between borders who may or may not be real antagonists this scenario.
Pitch Black (2000)
Vin Diesel is no Laurence Olivier, but the role of Riddick was tailor-made for him. After a plane carrying a dangerous convict crash-lands on an alien planet, the last thing the crew has to worry about is their dangerous cargo. While one could argue the humans are the real villains of the piece, Diesel created the ultimate anti-hero in Riddick that launched a franchise. After night descends, that's when the real fun begins.
The Descent (2005)
Forget sawing your arm off in 127 Hours, the real danger of being trapped in a cave system is the band of flesh-eating humanoids that lurk below. The name of the this film should really be Claustrophobia, because that's all you'll feel for the first hour as a team of female spelunkers descends into its doom. A true creature feature can only succeed if it spends as much time on the set-up as it does on the payoff.
Jeepers Creepers (2001)
Before he was the Mac guy and Mr. Drew Barrymore, Justin Long was just the unsuspecting prey to a flesh-flaying creature in Anytown, U.S.A. While most monster movies are about the big reveal, this one actually gets less scary when the mystery monster finally shows up. Long's cocky skepticism eventually bites him in the ass (and perhaps everywhere else) but damn if that song won't ever leave your head and send chills down your spine thereafter.
Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Shark movies should be considered their own genre altogether. If Jaws is on one side of the spectrum and Sharknado is on the other, Deep Blue Sea would land somewhere right in the middle. The premise is almost laughable. Most medical studies and drugs have their side effects, but super-smart, genetically engineered Mako sharks is usually not one of them. The idea of the monsters seeking revenge is great and the escape scenes in the film are not without merit – plus there are some comedic moments that keep it from taking itself too seriously
Mimic (1997)
Throughout the mid-to-late '90s, you couldn't pass a video store aisle (remember those?) without an endless amount of monstrous horror movie titles jumping out at you. Amidst the leprechauns, anacondas, and Ernest Scared Stupids was Guillermo del Toro's insect thriller Mimic. As the director's ambitious English-language debut, it had all the elements of a great monster flick: a scientific experiment gone awry, a noir setting, and a clever creature. While it can veer into B-movie territory at times, del Toro's daft directing keeps you on your toes even 'til the end.

The Pink Panther is heading to the big screen for The Simpsons director David Silverman's upcoming live-action movie. MGM executives are hoping to turn the animated cool cat into a hit new film franchise.
The project will not feature the bumbling Inspector Jacques Clouseau from the Pink Panther movies, but rather the colourful cat who appeared on TV and in the opening credits of Peter Sellers' films.
Silverman, who directed The Simpsons Movie, is attached, while veteran producer Walter Mirisch, who oversaw the original Pink Panther films and TV series, will serve as the producer of the new film, along with Dame Julie Andrews, whose late husband Blake Edwards directed the classic 1960s and 1970s movies.
The actress says, "I am delighted that the legacy of Blake’s iconic Pink Panther franchise will continue to grow in its new hybrid form. It is exciting that the quintessential ‘next step’ for our beloved Panther will be enjoyed by a fourth generation of audiences. I feel that Blake is encouraging us on."
The most recent Pink Panther movies focused on Clouseau, with Roberto Benigni playing the detective in 1993 and Steve Martin taking on the role in 2006 and 2009.

DreamWorks
For the bulk of every Rocky and Bullwinkle episode, moose and squirrel would engage in high concept escapades that satirized geopolitics, contemporary cinema, and the very fabrics of the human condition. With all of that to work with, there's no excuse for why the pair and their Soviet nemeses haven't gotten a decent movie adaptation. But the ingenious Mr. Peabody and his faithful boy Sherman are another story, intercut between Rocky and Bullwinkle segments to teach kids brief history lessons and toss in a nearly lethal dose of puns. Their stories and relationship were much simpler, which means that bringing their shtick to the big screen would entail a lot more invention — always risky when you're dealing with precious material.
For the most part, Mr. Peabody &amp; Sherman handles the regeneration of its heroes aptly, allowing for emotionally substance in their unique father-son relationship and all the difficulties inherent therein. The story is no subtle metaphor for the difficulties surrounding gay adoption, with society decreeing that a dog, no matter how hyper-intelligent, cannot be a suitable father. The central plot has Peabody hosting a party for a disapproving child services agent and the parents of a young girl with whom 7-year-old Sherman had a schoolyard spat, all in order to prove himself a suitable dad. Of course, the WABAC comes into play when the tots take it for a spin, forcing Peabody to rush to their rescue.
Getting down to personals, we also see the left brain-heavy Peabody struggle with being father Sherman deserves. The bulk of the emotional marks are hit as we learn just how much Peabody cares for Sherman, and just how hard it has been to accept that his only family is growing up and changing.
DreamWorks
But more successful than the new is the film's handling of the old — the material that Peabody and Sherman purists will adore. They travel back in time via the WABAC Machine to Ancient Egypt, the Renaissance, and the Trojan War, and 18th Century France, explaining the cultural backdrop and historical significance of the settings and characters they happen upon, all with that irreverent (but no longer racist) flare that the old cartoons enjoyed. And oh... the puns.
Mr. Peabody &amp; Sherman is a f**king treasure trove of some of the most amazingly bad puns in recent cinema. This effort alone will leave you in awe.
The film does unravel in its final act, bringing the science-fiction of time travel a little too close to the forefront and dropping the ball on a good deal of its emotional groundwork. What seemed to be substantial building blocks do not pay off in the way we might, as scholars of animated family cinema, have anticipated, leaving the movie with an unfinished feeling.
But all in all, it's a bright, compassionate, reasonably educational, and occasionally funny if not altogether worthy tribute to an old favorite. And since we don't have our own WABAC machine to return to a time of regularly scheduled Peabody and Sherman cartoons, this will do okay for now.
If nothing else, it's worth your time for the puns.
3/5
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Lions Gate via Everett Collection
When we last left our heroes, they had conquered all opponents in the 74th Annual Hunger Games, returned home to their newly refurbished living quarters in District 12, and fallen haplessly to the cannibalism of PTSD. And now we're back! Hitching our wagons once again to laconic Katniss Everdeen and her sweet-natured, just-for-the-camera boyfriend Peeta Mellark as they gear up for a second go at the Capitol's killing fields.
But hold your horses — there's a good hour and a half before we step back into the arena. However, the time spent with Katniss and Peeta before the announcement that they'll be competing again for the ceremonial Quarter Quell does not drag. In fact, it's got some of the film franchise's most interesting commentary about celebrity, reality television, and the media so far, well outweighing the merit of The Hunger Games' satire on the subject matter by having Katniss struggle with her responsibilities as Panem's idol. Does she abide by the command of status quo, delighting in the public's applause for her and keeping them complacently saturated with her smiles and curtsies? Or does Katniss hold three fingers high in opposition to the machine into which she has been thrown? It's a quarrel that the real Jennifer Lawrence would handle with a castigation of the media and a joke about sandwiches, or something... but her stakes are, admittedly, much lower. Harvey Weinstein isn't threatening to kill her secret boyfriend.
Through this chapter, Katniss also grapples with a more personal warfare: her devotion to Gale (despite her inability to commit to the idea of love) and her family, her complicated, moralistic affection for Peeta, her remorse over losing Rue, and her agonizing desire to flee the eye of the public and the Capitol. Oftentimes, Katniss' depression and guilty conscience transcends the bounds of sappy. Her soap opera scenes with a soot-covered Gale really push the limits, saved if only by the undeniable grace and charisma of star Lawrence at every step along the way of this film. So it's sappy, but never too sappy.
In fact, Catching Fire is a masterpiece of pushing limits as far as they'll extend before the point of diminishing returns. Director Francis Lawrence maintains an ambiance that lends to emotional investment but never imposes too much realism as to drip into territories of grit. All of Catching Fire lives in a dreamlike state, a stark contrast to Hunger Games' guttural, grimacing quality that robbed it of the life force Suzanne Collins pumped into her first novel.
Once we get to the thunderdome, our engines are effectively revved for the "fun part." Katniss, Peeta, and their array of allies and enemies traverse a nightmare course that seems perfectly suited for a videogame spin-off. At this point, we've spent just enough time with the secondary characters to grow a bit fond of them — deliberately obnoxious Finnick, jarringly provocative Johanna, offbeat geeks Beedee and Wiress — but not quite enough to dissolve the mystery surrounding any of them or their true intentions (which become more and more enigmatic as the film progresses). We only need adhere to Katniss and Peeta once tossed in the pit of doom that is the 75th Hunger Games arena, but finding real characters in the other tributes makes for a far more fun round of extreme manhunt.
But Catching Fire doesn't vie for anything particularly grand. It entertains and engages, having fun with and anchoring weight to its characters and circumstances, but stays within the expected confines of what a Hunger Games movie can be. It's a good one, but without shooting for succinctly interesting or surprising work with Katniss and her relationships or taking a stab at anything but the obvious in terms of sending up the militant tyrannical autocracy, it never even closes in on the possibility of being a great one.
3.5/5
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WENNDespite the mysterious absence of guitarist Richie Sambora since April, Bon Jovi have continued to carry on regardless, playing up to tens of thousands of fans per night during their current Because We Can world tour. But they're certainly not the first band to soldier on without a key member. Here's a look at five others who refused to call it quits. The WhoIt’s extremely rare for the sticksman to be the focal point of a group. But through a chaotic mixture of a unique drumming style, a habit of passing out on stage and a fondness for explosives, Keith Moon became The Who's biggest, if most self-destructive, weapon. Following his death from a drug overdose in 1978, the Quadrophenia legends released two albums with his replacement, Kenney Jones, before splitting. But since reuniting in 1996, they have continued to function as a nostalgic live act despite the loss of another key member, bassist John Entwistle, in 2002.Lynyrd SkynyrdFew bands have had to deal with such a colossal tragedy as Lynyrd Skynyrd. The Southern rock pioneers lost three members of their core line-up, including lead vocalist Ronnie Van Zant, when a chartered plane crashed into a forest in Mississippi in 1977. The rest of the group understandably called it quits soon after but ten years later reformed for a 'one-time' tribute tour which has now lasted 26 years, although guitarist Gary Rossington now remains the only founding member.
Manic Street PreachersThe Welsh trio became the self-styled Generation Terrorists of British rock in the '90s thanks to an androgynous glam image, a revolutionary set of political ideals and troubled lyricist Richey Edwards' dark themes of depression, self-harm and alcohol abuse. But following his still-unresolved disappearance in 1995, the band regrouped and reinvented themselves as an anthemic stadium rock act, later reaching No.1 in the UK with 1998's This Is My Truth, Tell Me Yours.GenesisResponsible for launching the careers of two of the '80s biggest male vocalists, Genesis began life as an avant-garde prog-rock band before Peter Gabriel's departure resulted in Phil Collins' transition from drummer to lead vocalist and a radical pop reinvention. After losing their second frontman in 1996, Mike Rutherford and Tony Banks then recruited one-hit wonders Stiltskin's Ray Wilson for 1997's critically-panned Calling All Stations before finally calling it a day.
QueenFronted by arguably the most charismatic showman in rock history, Queen's highly influential career was presumed to be over following Freddie Mercury's death in 1991. However, Brian May and Roger Taylor have continued to keep the name alive, sometimes rather questionably, through 1995's posthumous album, Made In Heaven, collaborations with Wyclef Jean, boyband 5ive and The Muppets, and a 2008 LP recorded with former Free lead vocalist Paul Rodgers.Follow @Hollywood_com
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Naomi Watts' new royal biopic Diana has come under fire from movie critics in Britain, who have labelled the film "horrendous", "cheerless" and "cheap". The British-born actress takes on the title role of Diana, Princess of Wales in the new picture, which premiered in the U.K. on Thursday night (05Sep13) and shows the late royal in the last years of her life before her death in a car crash in Paris, France in 1997.
However, the film has received a slew of scathing reviews from Britain's critics in the aftermath of the premiere, with many questioning the movie's historical accuracy and even slamming the story as a "soap opera" re-imagining of the princess' life.
Peter Bradshaw of The Guardian gave Diana just one star out of a possible five and heavily criticised the film, writing, "Poor Princess Diana. I hesitate to use the term 'car crash cinema'. But the awful truth is that, 16 years after that terrible day in 1997, she has died another awful death... The movie isn't so much Mills & Boon as a horrendous Fifty Shades of Grey with the S&M sex taken out - and replaced with paparazzi intrusion and misunderstood charity work... The moment anyone, anyone at all, opens their mouth we are in TV-movie-land, soap-land."
The Daily Telegraph's David Gritten concurs, singling out the movie's references to the Paris car crash as a "redundant piece of lurid sensationalism", adding of the film, "What's the point of Diana? It's hardly fascinating. It doesn't offer new facts about the Princess's life. And it certainly doesn't explain her complexity or contradictions. That would take a different, better film altogether."
David Edwards of the Daily Mirror adds, "Diana can only be described as a fabulously awful film. The Queen of Hearts has been recast as a sad-sack singleton that even Bridget Jones would cross the street to avoid... The film's a cheap and cheerless effort... Director Oliver Hirschbiegel... should know better... Despite a peroxide hair-job, (Watts) looks, sounds and acts nothing like the Princess of Wales. Wesley Snipes in a blonde wig would be more convincing."
Christopher Tookey of the Daily Mail also gave the film just one star out of five, branding it "tedious", "slow" and "terribly, terribly dull".
The film has also been criticised by the princess' former lover Dr. Hasnat Khan, who is played by Lost star Naveen Andrews onscreen.
He insists the story is based on "hypotheses and gossip" and is "completely wrong".

Michael Bay pioneered the market on racist machinery, introducing a pair of robots in Transformers that lay waste to political correctness. You might expect this from the man who has made a career out of the sense of humor celebrated by 12-year-old boys. But from Disney, you'd assume that ethnic stereotypes aren't really part of the game plan... well, at least from contemporary Disney (before the modern era took hold, the works of Walt were infamously riddled with jive talking crows and babbling Siamese cats). But the company's latest foray, Planes, seems to opt for every stereotype in the book.
The trailer below showcases a Southern yokel leading the cast, backed up by a passionate and poetic Latin lover, a mystical Indian temptress, an uptight and rigid British character, and a quip-snapping African-American forklift. Seems as though the days of Peter Pan's American Indians aren't as far behind us as we might have thought...
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What do Eddie Murphy, Bette Midler, Paul Newman, and Angie Dickinson have in common? No, they all haven't been at the same party at Brett Ratner's house. They are all winners of a Golden Globe. No, Murphy didn't get one for Pluto Nash he got one in 1982 as the New Star of the Year. The what now?
The Hollywood Foreign Press Agency started giving out the Most Promising Newcomer award in 1948, four years after their inception, to the person they thought was going to be hottest new thing to take Hollywood. The first winners were Richard Widmark and Lois Maxwell, people your grandparents might not even remember. From 1954 to 1965 the award was given out to three to four men and women who the European journalists thought were going to take the world by storm. In 1966 the award switched again and went to an actor and actress for a specific movie and, possibly because so many newcomers didn't show any promise, was renamed. The first winners were Robert Redford for Inside Daisy Clover (I'm sure he was!) and Elizabeth Hartman for A Patch of Blue.
Those first winners highlight exactly the problem with this specific category: more often than not the winners wound up being duds. Sure Robert Redford is one of the biggest stars in the world but Elizabeth Hartman? Let's look at 1969 Leonard Whiting and Olivia Hussey were given a pair of trophies for their portrayal of Romeo &amp; Juliet. Whiting retired from films by the mid-'70s and Hussey went on to star in some crappy horror films and then become a crazy agorophobic who had a hard time leaving the house. These are your New Stars of the Year, ladies in gentleman.
By 1983 the Globes were sick of giving this award to turkeys and gave out the final salutes in the category to Ben Kinglsey and Sandahl Bergman. All in all, the awards have a pretty lousy track record. Of the 59 actors and 58 actresses given the honor, I count only 17 actors (Richard Burton, Anthony Perkins, Paul Newman, James Garner, George Hamilton, Warren Beatty, Terence Stamp, Peter O'Tool, Omar Sharif, Albert Finney, Robert Redford, Dustin Hoffman, Jon Voight, James Earl Jones, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Eddie Murphy, and Ben Kingsley) and 14 actresses (Shirley MacLaine, Natalie Wood, Jayne Mansfield, Sandra Dee, Angie Dickinson, Jane Fonda, Ann-Margret, Patty Duke, Mia Farrow, Tatum O'Neal, Jessica Walter, Diana Ross, Jessica Lange, and Bette Midler) who achieved any sort of lasting modicum of celebrity (gauged by, well, whether or not I know who the heck they are). That's a 28% and 24% success rate predicting the promisenessness of newcomers. You have better odds playing Scratch-a-Millions from your local lottery system.
I reached out to the Hollywood Foreign Press Association for a comment on why the category was struck from the record and if they ever hope to bring it back. They didn't return my request for comment. They're probably still embarrassed about just how lousy their crystal ball is.
Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan
[Photo Credit: Frank Edwards/Fotos International/Getty Images]
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We've delved passionately into many adventures over the course of these past few months. Political season spawned the frightful warfare between pack animals (Donkeys Vs. Elephants) and snack foods (Pizza Vs. Burritos). Professional sports tossed us headfirst into a battle between jungle beasts and humanoid behemoths (Tigers Vs. Giants). And the release of the final chapter of The Twilight Saga left us smack dab in the middle of an age-old rivalry of Edwards Vs. Jacobs. But now, what with young Biblo Baggins and his gaggle of friends and foes gracing theaters at long last with The Hobbit, we find ourselves facing another unexpected journey: Trolls Vs. Dwarves.
Yes, our latest foray into the trenches will set us betwixt pop culture's greatest examples of each member of these mythological species. When the feuding forces face off in Middle-earth, we are not quite plagued with the query of whom we might consider the more venerable team. A Troll has at its disposal size, strength, an ostensibly impenetrable epidermis. But a Dwarf! Think of the spirit, the beards, the propensity for musical housekeeping. A close battle this will be, no doubt. And one that we have been delegated with overseeing. Because that's what we do here on the Internet.
And so, let us setting off through the forests, mountains, caverns, and regional theater houses of pop culture to pit against one another those individuals most worthy of adorning these Tolkienian titles. Gather your precious accessories and fire up the rabbit sleigh: it's time for the epic escapade of Trolls Vs. Dwarves.
The Fairy Tale Journey: The Bridge Troll Vs. The Seven Dwarves
Fighting for the Troll Race: The bridge-and-tunnel dweller from the "Three Billy Goats Gruff" children's story
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His insatiable appetite, and a residence that gets Red Hot Chili Peppers stuck in enemies' heads
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: The day-laboring septet of Snow White acclaim
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Their impressive work-ethic, plus a sneeze packed with superhuman inertia
The Victor: The Seven Dwarves, of course. First of all, strength in numbers. Second, they've got Disney money funding their fight.
The '80s Movies Journey: Torok Vs. Willow
Fighting for the Troll Race: The dastardly San Francisco based monster who just wants to be human again from John Carl Buechler's 1986 horror film Troll
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His emerald ring... huh, I guess magical rings and trolls are just naturally coexisting phenomena in fantasy fiction
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: Willow Ufgood, the good-hearted warrior who fends off forces of evil to protect an innocent young infant
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His spellbook, courtesy of a wizard as special thanks for being such a devoted bodyguard — also, he's totally cool to watch your kids while you run to the food store real quick
The Victor: Willow. No heart as strong as his can be overtaken by a dark force like Torok.
The Comedic Journey: Danny DeVito's Tolling Troll Vs. Tim Conway's Dorf
Fighting for the Troll Race: Danny DeVito's wretched, beaked creature, charged with keeping prisoner the "baby boy" who would eventually slay the Night Man and win the heart of a coffee shop princess
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His wicked occupancy of the boy's hole soul, and a bounty of toll money
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: Tim Conway's jack of all trades character Dorf, of such films as Dorf on Golf, Dorf Goes Fishing, and Dorf and the First Games of Mount Olympus
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His knack for bestowing knowledge about some of life's great mysteries unto the viewing public
The Victor: Danny DeVito wins this battle, thanks in part because he's "got a guy" for this sort of thing
The Cyberspace Journey: Internet Trolls Vs. The "PYGMIES + DWARFS" Argument
Fighting for the Troll Race: The notorious subspecies that haunts Reddit message boards.
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Their tenacity for ruining intelligent conversations about pop culture phenomena
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: The controversial "PYGMIES + DWARFS" Argument that spawned on the famed science blog Pharyngula between host PZ Myers and Bible literalist Jim Pinkoski
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Its mind-blowing absurdity
The Victor: "PYGMIES VS. DWARFS." The whole ordeal might be divisive, but everyone hates Internet trolls.
The Really Cold Places Journey: The Troll Ski Resort Vs. Eris, the Dwarf Planet
Fighting for the Troll Race: The lovely vacation spot of the Troll Ski Resort, located in snowy British Columbia!
You have my sword, my bow, and...: It's challenging slopes and piping hot cocoa
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: Eris, the dwarf planet floating outside of Neptune's orbit
You have my sword, my bow, and...: The fact that it's almost freakin' planet
The Victor: Eris, because it has an actual gravitational pull. Although I hear the TSR is divine.
The Musical Journey: Troll (the band) Vs. Dwarves (also a band)
Fighting for the Troll Race: A band. They're called Troll. I have never heard of them.
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Their black metal.
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: Dwarves, another band. I also don't know them. I'm sorry.
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Their American punk!
The Victor: Trolls. I find their music more frightening.
The Ultimate Journey: Troll Dolls Vs. Tyrion Lannister
Fighting for the Troll Race: Those horrifying dolls that hypnotized American youths into thinking they were awesome back in the '60s
You have my sword, my bow, and...: Their mortifying profit margins
Fighting for the Dwarf Race: Tyrion Lannister, Peter Dinklage's fan favorite antihero on Game of Thrones
You have my sword, my bow, and...: His Emmy
The Victor: Tyrion Lannister, and I'm sure no one is going to argue with me there (people love that dude).
We might have lost a couple of Dwarves in this treacherous crusade, but the Trolls' wrath was duly quelled. The Dwarves, the force of good in The Hobbit (and almost everywhere else, it seems!) will always prevail. Head on out to theaters to see them take down a few nasty Trolls in The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey!
[Photo Credit: Warner Bros.]
More:
Remember All the 'Hobbit' Dwarves with This Mnemonic Device
What Your Favorite Troll Says About You
'The Hobbit': What the Heck is a 'Warg?' Middle Earth Vocabulary For Non-Nerds
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