Seeking God in the Every Day

“Pregnancy Is Such a Burden”

Monday night I was at small group. I love my small group, and it has been a huge blessing in my life so far. I am getting to know some wonderful couples and making friends and starting to feel, for the first time in 10 months, like I have a life and a community around me. We haven’t shared what we’re going through with anyone in my small group at this point, and I don’t know if/when we will.

One of the couples in our group announced a couple of weeks ago that they are expecting. And while I do find myself often feeling sad and left out when I find out people are pregnant, I’ve been genuinely happy for them. But Monday night I had to take a step back and bite my tongue when the mom-to-be started talking about how, while they’re happy to be expecting, “pregnancy is such a burden.” She said it because she feels “slightly nauseated” if she doesn’t eat every two hours.

When she said that, my stomach clenched. I don’t know why it annoyed me so much. I guess because I feel she is taking her pregnancy for granted. And maybe because I would rather projectile vomit every single day for 40 weeks than not get pregnant. I can’t really be upset with her, because it’s not like she knows what we’re dealing with. And I don’t think most people have ever thought about infertility or how absolutely painful it is to find out you may never have children.

I guess comments like that–and so many others–make me wish infertility were a more recognized issue (not that I’m doing anything to make it more known at this point). I wish when people thought about saying, “So when are you going to have kids?” they knew enough about infertility to stop themselves and think, what if she can’t?

2 thoughts on ““Pregnancy Is Such a Burden””

I had a friend struggle with infertility. She went through three rounds of IUI without success and then did IVF. She got pregnant with twins (yay), but a few weeks in she was kind of complaining about having to wear maternity pants already. I was a little taken aback.. I mean…she should understand if anyone would! Bring on the maternity pants!!
I feel your pain though. My sister likes to call and tell me my eggs are going bad and my children will be sick…. because she’s just that type of person. One day I’ll tell her what we’ve been through and give her a smack on the back of the head. 🙂

Post navigation

Tori Andrew

Infertility is painful. We started trying to conceive in September 2011 and were diagnosed with infertility in July 2012. We finally conceived in April 2014, and are expecting our first child in January. While we have felt so much pain and grief in our infertility, we have been blessed to see how God has used this trial to shape us and draw us closer to himself. I pray that he will use this blog for his glory and that the things he is teaching me in this life will speak to others. Praise God that our trials are not in vain.

Follow Blog via Email

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.