Black Jesus just can’t take it any more. He hates his dying wife and his transsexual son – but not for the reasons you think. She won’t let him obsessively cut coupons, and he/she fetishizes guns to the point of distraction. His other daughter is a dope fiend, and his recently deceased father was an out and out pervert. And don’t even bring up autistic child prodigy Hobie. Desperate to play the violin, the partially blind boy spends his days roaming around the city, instrument in hand and toilet paper tube up to his bad eye. When the youthful talent meets European Ernie, it seems like everything will be all right. He coaches the child, and even suggests someone who might be able to teach him a thing or two. In the meantime, Mom and the sexually confused Shamu build a bomb. With Black Jesus out of the house, they intend to avenge the cultural attacks on religion once and for all.

Let me tell you a story that few lived to tellAbout a thousand-year-old-fish, surely sent from HellSpawn of a demon whale, and a drunk King KongHe's as big as a bus, with a 12-foot dongWith a 12-foot dong

Just his sideways glance smashes men to bitsHe takes 100-year naps, and 2-ton shitsAnd 2-ton shits

He's the beast from beneath, and the king of the fishesHe goes by the name of Old UlyssesOld Ulysses

Born in a volcanoOld UlyssesOld Ulysses will kill everyone you know

The Land Monster of Possum Lake:

Old Ulysses was killed by father and sonNow the land-based monster's the only one