segunda-feira, 23 de março de 2015

So, today was a new feelings day.
Its the third time in less than one week that I felt my hearth bounce. It doesn't feels like its running faster nor slower, it feels like it goes the other way around, and my body naturally makes me cough, to make it work properly again.
This week I'm having 4 exams. I guess, once again, it is just stress and anxiety.
My parents got very worried, and told me to go to the IR, but I just don't have the time to go spend my night there, I have to study.
That being said, I thought about my bald spots. Once again I went online and researched about Alopecia areata. I saw scary images and videos. I do not want to get to that point. My parents got me a new dermatologist.
When will this end?
Will this end?
When did I became this person?
...

I think that I've decided that there is no point on hiding it anymore. No point on lying about it.
I think I'll have to accept me has I'm.
Raquel saw my messed up hair today and asked me if I hadn't had time to brush it.
I told her the truth. I told her that I have an autoimmune disease called Alopecia areata, which means my body is fighting my hair because of the chronicle stress it feels.. And that is why my hair is a fucking mess.