It’s no secret Donald Trump will take any support he can get from anyone, anywhere, at any time. Being the businessman that he is, he knows there’s no such thing as bad press, and no such thing as too much support, because just like with a business, a dollar earned is a dollar earned — the same goes for earning a vote.

The Republican party has no shortage of candidates running for the Oval Office in 2016. With Donald Trump leading the pack, it really seems as though anyone has a shot at becoming the nominee for the GOP. One person who noticed he may have an actual shot at becoming the leader of the free world is Glimmers the Clown. Glimmers feels, he above anyone else, really embodies the GOP platform and everything it stands for. He believes in the Constitution […]

It has long been speculated that the rare Cheetos gene may, in fact, be in more people than once considered. You can see several examples of this Cheetos line along the shores of New Jersey and New England, stretching into the Midwest and slightly into the western states. Looking into this phenomenon of genetic mysticism of the Cheetos gene, it was brought to our attention here at Free Wood Post that two well-known politicians may carry the gene, and could […]

In a startling new video, the same group that brought you the other videos shining a spotlight on Planned Parenthood, have now obtained exclusive video footage of the women’s and community health organization purposefully feeding a baby to a Tyrannosaurus Rex.

Rachel Dolezal, the former NAACP Spokane chapter president accused of pretending to be black has gone a step further. She now claims to have been a founding member of the Black Panther Party. The Black Panthers were founded in 1966 in Oakland, CA. The core practice was its armed citizens’ patrols to monitor the behavior of police officers and challenge police brutality in Oakland, CA. In 1969, community social programs became a core activity of party members. The Black […]

In what should come as a surprise to no one, considering their coverage of unarmed black people being brutalized by the police, the Southern Poverty Law Center has added Fox News to their list of hate groups, as they meet the criteria. Time and time again, Fox News has shown their true colors with their own colorful language surrounding people of color and the LGBT community. From calling any black person who stands up in protest against the police “thugs” […]

China has a bold new plan to deal with extreme pollution. As the world’s largest source of carbon emissions, China is responsible for a third of the planet’s greenhouse gas output and has sixteen of the world’s twenty most polluted cities. The air quality is so bad it has blocked out the sun and the government has resorted to putting up digital billboards to replicate sunrises and sunsets. However, the billboards don’t address the actual pollution problem. The average Chinese […]

With Republican after Republican lining up for their chance at the Oval Office in 2016, the Republican National Committee (RNC) has just announced that they will be releasing a list of names that will include everyone who will not be running for the Republican nomination. The list, about 14 names long, includes John Boehner and Mitch McConnell — they know too many people hate them, so really — why bother? This year, more than any other seems like many are […]

It’s no secret Donald Trump will take any support he can get from anyone, anywhere, at any time. Being the businessman that he is, he knows there’s no such thing as bad press, and no such thing as too much support, because just like with a business, a dollar earned is a dollar earned — the same goes for earning a vote.

The Republican party has no shortage of candidates running for the Oval Office in 2016. With Donald Trump leading the pack, it really seems as though anyone has a shot at becoming the nominee for the GOP. One person who noticed he may have an actual shot at becoming the leader of the free world is Glimmers the Clown. Glimmers feels, he above anyone else, really embodies the GOP platform and everything it stands for. He believes in the Constitution […]

It has long been speculated that the rare Cheetos gene may, in fact, be in more people than once considered. You can see several examples of this Cheetos line along the shores of New Jersey and New England, stretching into the Midwest and slightly into the western states. Looking into this phenomenon of genetic mysticism of the Cheetos gene, it was brought to our attention here at Free Wood Post that two well-known politicians may carry the gene, and could […]

In a startling new video, the same group that brought you the other videos shining a spotlight on Planned Parenthood, have now obtained exclusive video footage of the women’s and community health organization purposefully feeding a baby to a Tyrannosaurus Rex.

Rachel Dolezal, the former NAACP Spokane chapter president accused of pretending to be black has gone a step further. She now claims to have been a founding member of the Black Panther Party. The Black Panthers were founded in 1966 in Oakland, CA. The core practice was its armed citizens’ patrols to monitor the behavior of police officers and challenge police brutality in Oakland, CA. In 1969, community social programs became a core activity of party members. The Black […]

In what should come as a surprise to no one, considering their coverage of unarmed black people being brutalized by the police, the Southern Poverty Law Center has added Fox News to their list of hate groups, as they meet the criteria. Time and time again, Fox News has shown their true colors with their own colorful language surrounding people of color and the LGBT community. From calling any black person who stands up in protest against the police “thugs” […]

China has a bold new plan to deal with extreme pollution. As the world’s largest source of carbon emissions, China is responsible for a third of the planet’s greenhouse gas output and has sixteen of the world’s twenty most polluted cities. The air quality is so bad it has blocked out the sun and the government has resorted to putting up digital billboards to replicate sunrises and sunsets. However, the billboards don’t address the actual pollution problem. The average Chinese […]

Wisconsin Governor and presidential hopeful Scott Walker has finally answered critics who have suggested that he does not have the proper education to govern. This morning, Walker signed into law a measure that would define anyone with an I.Q. of 90 or higher as a “genius”. During today’s press conference Walker stated: “I’ve always known I was exceptional but today everyone knows that I am a genius. I is proof that we don’t need no education department. I may […]

With the news of New England Patriots’ footballs being insignificantly deflated in the AFC Championship against the Indianapolis Colts starting to dwindle in the media, a new startling allegation has been made known. ESPN is reporting Patriots Quarterback Tom Brady has been accused of performance enhancing. New evidence suggests the star QB ate his Wheaties the morning of the game. “This is outrageous!” said Seattle Seahawks Cornerback Richard Sherman. “Who’s to say he’s not going to eat Wheaties again before […]

Earlier today, President Obama announced that he will sign an executive order removing President Andrew Jackson from the $20 bill and replace him with women’s rights advocate Susan B. Anthony. The idea was inspired by the organization Women On 20’s who is currently conducting voting on which heroic American woman should be the new face of the $20 bill. However, according to South Carolina Republican Senator Lindsey Graham the new $20 bill is likely to cause mass confusion. “We have […]

According to early reports, popular rapper Kanye West has been admitted to a Los Angeles hospital due to a serious rectal blockage. Allegedly, West got his own head lodged in his rectum, causing severe spinal and intestinal injuries and further brain damage. Dr. Dean Rueter, Kanye’s surgeon, was able to comment on the matter. “I’ve never seen anything like it,” he said, chuckling. “Sorry,” he added. “This is a very, uh, unusual injury, so my staff and I are […]