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Airport: It is a nice July morning, I arrive to Heathrow. I have to run to check in desk to avoid the fine for being late. On my way I almost hit John Smith, typical englishman, who has on his summer holliday decided to take a trip to Spain.Airplane: This same normal londoner John Smith sits next to me at the plane. He helps sausages to go down with bottle of red wine. I ask for another bread because it has carbohydrates.Arrive: At the bus to hotel my new manager tells me that we have running session immediately after arrive. My teams bus is followed by a colorful tourist bus, where the guide tells to a bit drunken John Smith about the orange farm on the left hand side.Evening: I run with my team two hours, take a shower and eat vegetable based dinner. In the next room John has finished the minibar and he has to go for a walk to have another beer.Morning: Alarm forces me to breakfast at 7.30. I take some fruits and strech my muscles. After hard workout I return to lunch at the same time that made wakes up John.Afternoon: I have a compulsory rest. John buys a silly hat and suncream. He goes to beach to enjoy the sun and babes.Evening: After small sleep I go to training ground again at 6. Sprints, some football and gym. Sun does not give any mercy. I sweat two kilos away. It is already late after dinner. My body feels heavy, sleep comes immediately. Meanwhile John has fallen asleep on the beach. He is a bit sweat because of the heat. He takes few beers and follows a midnight show at the club near by.Next day: I have the same program. Body feels sore and the heat is terrible. John goes to Aquapark and argues with the local taxidriver.Next day: Same program, except shorter and harder runs. I am exchausted. Good hard workday again, I get one hour free time at the pool. John burns himself at the pool again. He chats with other english tourists about rubgys future.Next day: We have shorter morning session and longer sleep at daytime. In the evening we play a game against local busdrivers and gardeners. Pablos All Stars is an easy opponent, 4-0. I miss two good chances to score. I am angry. John drinks tequila whole day at the restaurant in the beach. He meets a girl in nightclub but does not score because after toilet visit he is too drunk to remember which girl it was. John is angry.Next day: Hard program again. My body is dead. Every single muscle is sore. I have a headache. I take a Meet the parents -movie after dinner. John has a hangover. He feels pain also. He chills out and takes pay tv.Next day: I need new hamstring muscles. I can hardly move. That does not prevent me training. We get a permission go with team mates to have a dinner and glass of red wine in a fancy restaurant. John needs new sandals and hat. He has lost the silly one. He goes shopping and golfing. He meets a nice polish girl in a fancy restaurant. They share a bottle of red wine.Next day: Hard training day. I am tired but I feel my fitness level is better. I call home to my mum. John tries to call the polish girl without luck. He feels he can drink more these days. Next day: We beat Croatian team in a hard game 2-0. I get almost send off after two hard tackles. It is a good game, I am happy. We have a nice and quiet evening with the team. Cant sleep because of the noice next door. John has forgotten the polish girl and goes to safari. It is a good safari. In the evening he gets thrown away from pub after the darts episode. He meets other drunk english people and has after party at his hotel room.Last day: I am tired and happy to go home. I buy some tax free parfumes. I am stiff as iron and my skin is white as milk. John pays his huge roombill. He is tired and tanned - more red actually. He sents postcards to his friends and work office in Croydon. And buys the full package of tax free alcohol.Home: I am happily home. Training camp was hard but good and successful. I am in better form although I have lost three kilos. I have also a possible hamstring injury. And one stamp more in my passport. Typical englishman John is home. Drinking is hard, but relaxing. He has got a beer-belly and lost his I love Marbella -shirt. He has also a possible skin cancer. He bragues everyone about his perfect holliday.