The Rise Of The Techno-Sexual

Daily Mail- For centuries, muscly macho men have ruled the roost – and dominated the dating world. But it seems all that is set to change, thanks to a new man on the scene: the ‘techno-sexual’. In news that will bring hope to geeky men everywhere, a new survey has revealed that nearly two thirds of women would happily swap the likes of hunky David Gandy for the dorkier charms of Facebook founder, Mark Zuckerberg. According to the research, 59 per cent of women say that they ‘most admire’ men who really know about technology, including how to fix and upgrade it. Geeky techno-sexuals trumped macho men by a whopping 10 per cent, with just 49 percent of women stating a preference for traditional men who know their way around a car engine but not a computer. ‘Heroes today are becoming more Mark Zuckerberg than Jeremy Clarkson, as our busy lives become increasingly dominated by our use of technology,’ said Roddy McLean, a computer expert from Crucial.com, which carried out the survey. ‘Technology impacts everyone’s lives, so it’s not surprising that people wish they had a better understanding of it and how to fix or upgrade it when it doesn’t perform. ‘The truth is it’s not as hard, or as confusing, as people think.’

I’m not 100% sure, but I think this article is saying that chicks nowadays wanna fuck me. Finally, the world has caught up to internet geniuses like myself. All these Stoolies always talking about how I’m out of shape and have a lazy eye and thats why chicks don’t wanna fuck me. Get with the times you fucking idiots! Chicks don’t care about a dude with a six pack that can fix a carburator. They want techno-sexuals. People like me. Bloggers and shit. All that old school macho shit is old hat. If we get a flat tire I’ll just hop on my fucking AAA iPhone app and have a tow truck there in 10 minutes while the Neanderthal is out there on his hands and knees doing the dirty work like an idiot. I probably can’t beat up some asshole at the bar but I’ll take his picture and tweet about him and embarrass him over the internet. I’m the new age TechnoSexual, motherfuckers. I got a Klout score over 70! I got twitter followers! Bitches get wet for retweets in 2013! Its probably mostly that people like Zuckerberg are billionaires but just in general bitches get wet for this shit!

Finally the world is falling right into the laps of me and my fellow nerds. Next thing you know chicks are only gonna fuck dudes who played Magic: The Gathering.