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The Catholic Church is FINALLY dealing with the issue that has been plaguing the faith for decades now. We’re of course talking about family members kissing each other during mass.

Oh, did you think we we’re going to say something else?

Nope, Pope Francis and his homies at The Vatican have been busy preparing a new set of guidelines for parishioners to follow that includes BANNING kissing during the sign of peace!

For those Perezcious readers out there who aren’t down with JC or who aren’t Catholic, the sign of peace is a brief moment during church when people shake hands with those around them. But over the years, some people have also been showing their love for one another by exchanging hugs and kisses.

No big deal, right? It’s not like anyone’s getting to third base in the middle of church.

Cardinal Antonio Canizares Llovera, the leader of the Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments, is wagging his finger this week though, saying

Two women in Indiana almost died after reliving a scene straight out of Stand By Me!

Stacey June Smith, 37, and Wendy Gayle Timothy, 34, were on top of an 80-foot-high bridge when they noticed a train was barreling down the tracks.

As they turned and tried to run on the tracks, they could tell that they weren't going to clear the bridge before the locomotive, so they got on their stomachs and hoped there was enough space between them and the train that they would survive.

Luckily for Stacey and Wendy, the 10-inches that separated the metal of the train bed and the wood of the bridge was enough room to leave them unscathed.

After the train came to a stop, the women tried to flee the scene, but

Barbara 'B.J.' Geardello and Robert Deyell were doing some animal role play, specifically puppy in this case, which is a very common act in the BDSM community.

Robert was walking on his bound knees, as though they were his hind legs, and wearing a hood outfitted as a dog's snout and ears. According to reports, he also had some kind of object protruding his anus; most likely a dildo shaped like a dog tail.

The pair was practicing consensual sex, so we're all for it! They probably just shouldn't have been doing so in naked in public.

The police are still unsure as to whether or not they want to press charges, seeing as there were complaints from the public about the sight.

We say let 'em off with a warning, and just be sure to put on a few more clothes before going out in public next time.

The once unheard of Union Street Guest House in Hudson, New York, is going viral.

That's because it's so much classier than you, that if you say anything negative about your stay there on Yelp, it'll practically rob you.

Seriously.

The vintage hotel in the historic New York town aims to get wedding parties to stay in its rooms. However, due to the old-timey feel, the hotel found that many visitors were unimpressed with the less-than-modern features.

The solution? If any guest at your wedding writes a negative review on the web, the hotel will take $500 from your initial deposit.

But don't worry. The Union is good people. You can get that money back if you convince your friends/family to remove the bad press. Simple as that!

The Union Street Guest House justified its clever marketing tactics by saying:

Well, the most trusted name in news might have just lost a little bit of credibility.

That's because CNN is making its own headlines today after reports that senior correspondent Arwa Damon drunkenly bit two medics at the U.S. Embassy in Baghdad.

That's so crazy!

The two victims, Charles Simons and Tracy Lamar, claim that in addition to suffering bites, they were also scratched and bruised, and are now suing Arwa and CNN for $1 million.

Arwa is an Emmy-award winning journalist who up until recently was most known for her reports in war-torn countries. Well, now she's definitely going to be known for something else.

The news station has remained tight-lipped about rumors that they continued to employ Arwa despite a history of drunken outbursts and violence. In fact, a spokesperson denied even knowing about the claims.

Here's hoping she just doesn't go full zombie now that she's had the taste of human flesh.

A new Bill Cosby accuser's story of how he allegedly sexually assaulted her after drugging her drink is horrifying.

According to Patricia, -- who decided to keep her last name anonymous -- Bill invited her to a dinner party in 1978 after they met at a conference... a dinner party that ended up just being the two of them: