Anderson Cooper and hero worship

Yes, most of us already knew. And still, so many fanboys (and girls) took to Twitter and Facebook this week in waves of fawning and fascination. Words like “hero” and “brave” and “courageous” popped up frequently, breathlessly.

In his detailed email to the Daily Beast’s Andrew Sullivan, Cooper wrote:

I’ve begun to consider whether the unintended outcomes of maintaining my privacy outweigh personal and professional principle. It’s become clear to me that by remaining silent on certain aspects of my personal life for so long, I have given some the mistaken impression that I am trying to hide something – something that makes me uncomfortable, ashamed or even afraid. This is distressing because it is simply not true.

I’ve also been reminded recently that while as a society we are moving toward greater inclusion and equality for all people, the tide of history only advances when people make themselves fully visible. There continue to be far too many incidences of bullying of young people, as well as discrimination and violence against people of all ages, based on their sexual orientation, and I believe there is value in making clear where I stand.

The fact is, I’m gay, always have been, always will be, and I couldn’t be any more happy, comfortable with myself, and proud.

I have always been very open and honest about this part of my life with my friends, my family, and my colleagues. In a perfect world, I don’t think it’s anyone else’s business, but I do think there is value in standing up and being counted. I’m not an activist, but I am a human being and I don’t give that up by being a journalist.

I applaud Cooper for his well-reasoned, articulate statements. But I’ll stop short of calling him a hero. Whether he likes it or not, he’s a public figure. A pop-culture touchstone with a bland, cheesy talk show and a former gig hosting “The Mole.” He’s at the top of his game, insulated from the everyday obstacles that haunt so many GLBT folk in school, at work, in life.

That’s not to say his revelation won’t help anyone. But it might have mattered more, and made a bigger difference, if he would have taken a real risk and done it years ago, when acceptance wasn’t guaranteed. When the stakes were higher. When I, or some other young writer, wasn’t sure if it was OK to do what we do and be gay.

“As an out lesbian and journalist, I’ve always felt conflicted about the uncertainty of Cooper’s sexuality,” wrote Stephanie Fairyington, co-editor of The Slant. “I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d felt the need to veil his homosexuality to make himself palatable to the masses. It’s irksome to think that he’d have to cater to the ignorant until he could secure a large following. Hopefully his coming out will blast the perception that you can’t be openly gay and a widely respected public figure.”

Too many times, a celebrity coming out seems like a career move, a play for relevance once the spotlight has dimmed. (See Clay Aiken, Ricky Martin, Lance Bass.) If we’re talking true risk-takers, I point to Adam Lambert, who did it just after “American Idol” and on the cover of Rolling Stone, no less. It probably hindered his career a bit. But it felt genuine.

Singer Frank Ocean, a member of hip-hop collective Odd Future, was also courageous this week. He revealed via his Tumblr that his first love, at 19 years old, was a man. The confession was supposed to be part of the liner notes for “Agent Orange,” a solo album due July 17 that features songs dedicated to past loves, including men.

“You run my mind, boy,” he sings during “Forrest Gump.” “But you’re so buff and so strong.”

Some, including Tyler, the Creator and Russell Simmons, have expressed their support. But publicity stunt or not, it’s a dangerous game to play in hip-hop. One need only glance at the derogatory comments popping up on Ocean’s YouTube videos.

I’ll also count my heroes in the kids who dare to come out in high school or in middle school, the actors and singers and politicans who do it when everything is on the line, before they’ve lived la vida loca or chummed around with Kathy Griffin and Lady Gaga.

Gavynne Rodriguez and NOH8 co-founder Adam Bouska.

San Antonio sixth grader Gavynne Rodriguez hasn’t gotten a fraction of the press that’s been lavished on Cooper. But he did something equally, perhaps more, extraordinary. The 12-year-old, who attends the San Antonio School for Inquiry and Creativity, wrote a letter to the board of directors at Pride San Antonio that inspired the “NoH8 City” theme for this year’s festival and parade:

Many students like me are bullied because other people think they are gay, whether they are or not.

I see on the news that kids are bullied & sometimes even commit suicide because people are filled with hate & ignorance & are mean to them.

At my old school I was bullied & picked on by 4 high school students because they thought I was gay. I moved to a new school, and again was bullied & made fun of because another student thought I dressed gay. My teacher told the superintendent & he was expelled. He never came back to SASIC. We have zero tolerance.

At SASIC they let us express ourselves and no one judges us. There‘s a boy in the middle school who wears high heels to class sometimes. I was afraid when I first saw him because I knew the other kids would hurt him. But I wasn’t at my old school or at a public school, because there they would definitely be mean & ugly to him. The teachers & kids at SASIC don’t care if he wears high heels to school. No one bullies him. Everyone seems to want to protect him & let him be himself, let him be happy.

I wish I lived in a place like my school where there was no hate. Where the community took care of each other and respected everyone. I hope someday San Antonio would be a no hate place to live.

I told my mom I really want the NOH8 theme for the gay pride parade because all these old bats who hurt others because they are gay or different need to come out of their bat caves & see that the world has changed around them.

Forget the silver-haired fox. This kid is my hero. And I’ll do everything I can to make sure my son grows up with as much grace, intelligence and heart.