My ex – an Iraq war veteran – invented a peculiar game. He would tie my wrist to my elbow without my permission. For him, I’d play an anonymous amputee.

The Middle Eastern body works on two planes: eroticized in one, and abused in the other – a la Abu Ghraib. In my videos and photos, the body is at once sensual and grotesque. I am an odalisque even when alone, with my body contorted, or covered in layers – memories made into performances made into stills.

The body of a homosexual is itself a stage: a site for fantasy and infection. Such dualities hold my attention; memory vs. the invented; orientalist vs. the odalisque; the middle ground where role-playing does not end.

I recreate these games when alone. I film myself, redo old acts, or invent diaries.