Hop in the sack more often with these ways to beat your biggest libido busters

Have More Sex

Have More Sex

Sex tonight? Sometimes you’re legitimately not into it, but be honest: Do you occasionally make excuses to avoid making love? In some long-term relationships partners go on auto-pilot, says Christina Steinorth, psychotherapist and author of Cue Cards for Life: Thoughtful Tips for Better Relationships. “They stop checking in, touching one another, talking.” This leaves you feeling disconnected—and more apt to pull a get-out-of-sex card. Here, 10 common sex excuses, and how to bust out.

Excuse #1: I’m too tired tonight.

Excuse #1: I’m too tired tonight.

Raise your hand if you’re not tired. Between jobs, kids and housework, we’re all running on empty. But careful you’re not using “too tired” as shorthand for “I don’t want to deal with you right now,” says Steinorth.

Bust out: First, sex usually doesn’t take that much time away from sleep (and you might sleep better!). Second, if you really mean there’s too much on your mind, say so: “I’m occupied with the bills/the bathroom leak/my boss’s attitude.” Clearing the air can clear the way for sex.