Bottom’s up, Pennsylvania!

As a Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board employee (I’m an “Intermittent Liquor Store Clerk,” referred to within the PLCB as a “135″), I can certainly say that no patronage is involved at the PLCB. I know – if I wanted patronage, my mom has connections in both parties, including two prominent Republican state senators (we’re Democrats).

I got my job because I scored 97% on a civil service test. There is a “Liquor Store Clerk 2″ position available in Lancaster County, but I can’t even apply for that job because I haven’t been with the PLCB for a year yet. Patronage won’t give me a boost up the ladder.

Bill (AshburnStadium)

On top of that, the PLCB is the biggest cash cow the Commonwealth has. We don’t use a single tax dollar to operate. Instead, we turn in more than $500 million (that’s a half-billion!) in profits to the Commonwealth’s General Fund.

I was once a proponent of privatization until I found out what the PLCB contributes to Pennsylvania. We are also one of the two largest purchasers of alcoholic beverages on the planet. Our only “competition” for the largest single purchaser is the Liquor Control Board of Ontario – not even Walmart comes close. With our size, we can get economies of scale that no one else can get, with the possible exception of Walmart. Therefore, prices are actually cheaper for many items than the same bottle in adjoining states.

I had a customer recently from NYC tell me that a 750-milliliter bottle of Ciroc vodka was sold for the same $57 in NYC as we charge for our 1.5-liter (1,500 milliliters) bottle. We get $33 for our 750-ml bottle, commonly called a “fifth.”

Bill (AshburnStadium)

Regarding the “union label,” most clerks are represented by United Food & Commercial Workers Local 1776, a supermarket workers’ union based near Philadelphia. It’s known for not having much power.

We just ratified a new contract, which for me, supposedly gives me one raise between now and 2015. I started at $11.34/hour (look at that number on an upside-down computer – it spells “hell”!).

Bill (AshburnStadium)

(Oops – computer = calculator)

Charles Orloski, Taylor, Pa

Excellent counterpoints, Mr. Bill Ashburn Stadium!

I support privatizing U.S. newpapers which are consolidated into hands of oligarchs, corporations, & Big-banks, Et cetera. Starting at well-over $11.34/hour, they enjoy drinking top-shelf liquors as a result of playing “Chug&Hug-a-Lug” with Administrations. The Game’s rule # 1 is, “Ask first what you can report, and never report what you cannot report about government.” It’s DECLINE’S favorite recipe.