AUSTIN - COMPLETELY IGNORING BANDS (PART FOUR)

We all woke up to Megan, our photographer, brushing her hair so loudly we thought the hotel room was being attacked by a swarm of bees. We were all completely out of it from the night before, but she insisted we get up and go downtown to see one of her favorite bands, 5 Talking Turds play. She demanded Alexis give her a makeover so she would look her best if for some reason she were to meet/fuck them.

We got downtown late and to our relief and her disappointment, they were playing their last song. She never worked up the nerve to talk to them, so we went on our way in pursuit of something gay.

We aimlessly walked around for at least two hours while Alexis took any opportunity he could to be photographed with boring straight dudes.

Finally, we got a call from Jeppe, who was staying at the fabulous Omni Hotel. He told us to meet him on the top floor in 20 minutes so he could give us artist passes to the Perez Hilton party that he was DJing.

We snuck our way to the top floor of the hotel and lounged by the pool. Jeppe was running late and we were fading quick.

Like a true weekend warrior, Funxalina searched through her purse and found a tiny bit of coke. We decide to do it under Alexis's skirt so we wouldn't get busted by all the undercover cops who were swimming in the hotel pool.

Then our friend Dean (the sexiest guy at SXSW) showed up and gave us Adderall! DREAMY!

We split up the 20 mg Adderall... Well, sort of, I kinda hogged it, but I couldn't help it! It's the only thing that really makes me feel complete.

Right as the Adderall began to kick in Jeppe showed up and gave us our passes! We said our goodbyes to Dean (who was looking so cute in that hot tub) and decided to get ready for our last night in Austin.