I have so many ups and downs with Tim. It's so hard figuring out what is real and what isn't but I do know I love him and I care about him so much, he can make me happier than most people in so many different ways that only he can achieve. He knows more about me than anyone, he's been there for me more than anyone and I don't think I've ever had anyone look after me the way he does when something goes wrong. He's really special. Of course there are downsides like with anything I guess but I think I just need to keep my perspective positive.

We were at a wedding tonight and as usual I got all teary haha I can't help it, the concept of people taking that leap of faith and deciding they want to live the rest of their lives together with one other person is so monumental. It's so beautiful and scary. I don't think I could ever committ to something so concrete. It's strange, I aim to find that kind of love and experience it but im deathly afraid of putting a label on it. Making it official. So much pressure, so blind and trusting that the other person will continue to love you. Trusting in your self that you will feel that kind of love for the same person for the rest of your LIFE. How does anyone even make it down the isle. Fuck.

I've always been weary of using all my life lines. Even when I was a kid, I would get super angry at friends who would say that we would be best friends FOREVER. The usage of that word would freak me the fuck out. I couldn't even let them say it without fighting them on it, I always felt it was the realist in me, maybe I'm just a coward? I would tell them off and call them stupid for thinking anything could last forever, that by the time we got to highschool we probably wouldn't even talk anymore. I was right...but you know, kinda mean of me haha. I remember offending the girls back in year 9, they were all discussing some silly pretend living situation that they were promising to do and wanted me to join/agree/promise. That when we finished highschool, all ¿6? of us would move in together. I kinda lost it and refused to even entertain the hypothetical thought of us living tougher. I wasn't going to stupidly promise to do something that i KNEW would never happen. It bugged me, that they were all pretending that it was actually going to work. Then in year 12, dear god, I don't think I could have gotten more annoying, I refused to do most of the activities our school arranged for us under the guise of 'community spirit' because I couldn't stand anyone and my logic was that if I wasn't tight with anyone this far into highschool, nothing was going to make me like them more than what I already did. I was fairly vocal about my predictions of who I would keep in contact with. And I was right. I didn't bother with my formal either. Lol antisocial much.

It makes me wonder if they have and will always just be self-fulfilling prophesies or me actually being realistic. Once I decide Im over a person or don't like them, my mind pretty much shuts off to them. It's very rare that my mind changes and whenever it has, I later remember the original reason why I didn't like that person to begin with and I kick myself for bothering with them at all.

So I'm a : pessimist/realist. I believe certain people make me happy but I also believe in the potential for bigger and better things, which make me discard the things I have now. =S

Maybe I should change that.

It's always awkward when people ask me and tim when we're getting married and stuff like that. It happened a bunch today and my default response is to laugh and say we're never getting married, and act like that's the worst idea I've ever heard. I've trained myself to answer that way, it makes people laugh a little AND it puts the pressure off tim. I would hate to scare him off by letting him think that I want him to settle down with me. Be another one of those delusional chicks. Not saying that deep down I don't want marriage with someone eventually. I honestly feel like we both have a lot of growing to do before we commit ourselves 100% to each other, but I do overexagerate how horrible I think us being marrried would be. The word married sound dirty to me, old and sad and loveless, but l suppose living together would be....ok...sort of? Not really, that would be horrible, I'm the biggest control freak. If I move out I want my own space, not to move to yet another environment where I don't have the final say in everything that goes down. He knows all this of course.

I don't know. We shall see. Neither of us are financially stable enough to move out anyway.

Point is, he has been both good and bad to me, just like I have been with him. It's been 2 years and like 5 months and the love has definitely grown. Losing someone like him now would be devastating. He knows too much! Lol

Despite not wanting to put scary labels and future plans in the works, I love him dearly. He is my rock. And we look pretty together XD

On my way to my last day of prac! I feel like I should be blogging more often =.= what's with everyone always feeling so guilty about their regularity of blog posts lol It's not like anyone is dying to hear what I have to say. Especially since I haven't even had topic based posts in forever.

These last 3 weeks have gone super fast, prac has, for once, been great! There were no real downsides. I never got nervous to go, the staff were super friendly and helpful, I had great patients, there was no negativity at ALL, except for the day that I got sent home with a cold I guess. I was so tired and stressed and trying to keep in control of all the shit that's going on in my personal life and I felt like I had failed. Lost control ={ I was really trying to so hard to do everything, see everyone, work, be good at prac, not meltdown with shit from home. And then the most pathetic thing sent me crashing =.=

Either way, not a biggie, I got a day off from prac and got to chill a little. Even the hours have been great, I feel better with arvo shifts. Sun! And I get to walk through newtown every day at it's busiest hours and judge all the annoyingly apathetic hipsters walking past me XD

Plus, god damn, so many good restaurants on Kings St and I get to walk 40min every day, plus at work I barely sit down, if that, so I feel slightly healthier for it. I've been good and always take the stairs at the hospital too haha although I have been craving going back to the gym with Tim. My facilitator was great, the ward was mellow and it was easy to get things done on time and not stress.

I even had enough energy to wake up at 5am today even though I got to bed around 2:30am lol. It was good, one of those morning where you jump out of bed and I had so much energy I was dancing around to the arctic monkeys. Plus the lighting was awesome. My room gets all the morning light from the sunrise and I have a great view of it XD

Yayyy. Now all I'm worried about is finding something to wear to a wedding tonight and a costume for tomorrow ={ I hate shopping. I find some clothes beautiful (in pics) but it just doesn't feel right for me or look good when I try it on.

SOOO. really rushed post because mumsy is driving me alllll the way to prac today. AND i am annoyed at the lack of posting coming from everyone, so let me lead by shitty example:

Last week: first week of Prac in cardiology. It was pretty awesome, really mellow, I really feel like I'm learning. Facilitator is nice, and travel is alright considering.

Weekend: Short catchup with Warren and Tim driving around aimlessly in Fairfield. I MISSED HIM. Saturday was a family gathering at Tim's place with those really awesome..spring roll looking things except theyre not. They're see through and you roll them yourself and the wrap is kind of like..really thin sticky noodle. TASTY. Sat night was Jamie's 22nd bday party.

Jamies:

Jam jamsss ♥

WAS AWESOME. Adult sized jumping castle, multitude of slurpies with malibu, unicorns and dinocrocs, licking, breast and humping. Plus I met some really cool people =D

and that pic summarizes EXACTLY what my night was like in relation to Tim. T'was fun =D

Sunday: Worked in the morning, so I was running on empty. Chilled with Diaz for a bit, went with Tim to Jamie's place to help clean up the mess..or well Lesha's place now, and the mess was already gone! So we re-inflated the jumping castle lol. They're so...active. I SO would not have been bothered to re inflate a jumping castle for 5 mins of jumping and then pack it away. *tips hat off to them*

THEN i finally got round to the Chilean Festival with Joel Matt Mikel and Kurt. WHAT A WASTE OF MONEY. No one really wanted to dance...and that was the only reason I went. So we payed $18 to sit on a hill while joel and mikel took turns ignoring us to play on my iphone. *LE SIGH* not bringing them again.

This week: prac again. Monday i chilled with peter after prac in newtown and got thai. Tuesday I got epicly sick and got sent home from prac which I was pretty devo about. Wed I took the day off and ran a LOT of errands with mum. Thur: almost raped on the train by crazy guy, prac and got to see Mr Timmy after he finished work.

NOW it is today.

=]

I wish I had more photos, I'm getting really bad at remembering. While I was at Jamies it didn't occur to me that I had forgotten my camera..or even thought to bring it until like 1am. It was sad. I used to be OBSESSED with pics.

Speaking of, I got a bunch developed yesterday XD

Now..i need to find a way to sort them...and redo my ENTIRE room ...and get a few $1000's to buy new furniture..lol and paint...and an electrician. LE SIGH.

pointless I swear.I;m so close to finishing uni! it's crazy, totally closing in on me. I have one hour of class left and that's it. The rest is practical until next year and then DUNZO.

Blogger has failed me yet again. I was a blogging MACHINE yesterday and none of them got through and now they are lost. I can't even remember what I wrote. Obviously not that important then.

I started my prac yesterday, it was the first prac I've ever had that I didn't get nervous for. I think it's a mix of me feeling more confident in my skills as a nurse, the fac that Im going back to a hospital that I've already done a prac in (and loved) and that I'm on arvo shifts (less to do).

It all panned out really well, I have a really friendly facilitator who doesn't make me feel like I'm the scum of the earth for asking her questions like others have. The ward I'm in is pretty mellow just because all the patients are independent so there isn't much to do in the way of physical labour (beds, showers, lifting, toileting) and little to no procedures. It's more relaxed BUT it's one of those kind of touch and go type places. People can crash quite easily so we just have to be alert and motor their stats well and be ready to act.

It all turned out well, I kind of LOVE arvo shifts, they fit in perfectly with my usual sleeping pattern. I get up at 10:30 have an hour to get ready and then leave. I finish at 9:30pm so then I walk 20min, catch a train and I'm home by 11:30pm =} I get to see sunshine unlike my last morning prac AND I don't feel tired and overwhelmed.Going to bed at 8pm and waking up at 4am is just too much of a direct violation to my persona. Lol. It bugs me mentally, I have this huge stigma associated with that lifestyle and it makes me want to shoot myself doing that 5 days a week. I get home tired, no one can ever hang out after work with me because they're having dinner and it just SUCKS balls.

You know, that saying is kind of harsh. 'sucks balls' like that is such a bad thing. I'm sure most guys love having their balls sucked on, and it's not the worst thing in the world to do unless someone is forcing you or smells or has genital warts or something. O.o

Anyway....

Today is my 2nd day, hopefully no one dies on my shift *fingers crossed* and that it's another slow shift.

Also, I want to file a formal complaint to everyone who fucked and conceived in February. There are far too many birthdays in october! It normalt isn't as bad, but due to my age bracket this is the year of 21st's for me, this and next year. Ugh. Which makes it harder to pick and choose who you say no to. To top it all off, it's also friggen Halloween which I love, and I swear it's like evey year that goes by there is one more person hosting a Halloween party. I've been invited to FIVE this year =.= and I want to go to all of them. Oh wait and there's one more thing. My mother's wedding =.=Yeah, I haven't really mentioned it to anyone until like a week ago...22 October. But we'll see.

This weekend should be alright too, I have Jamie's 21st on Sat and the Chilean Festival is on this Sunday at the Fairfield Showgrounds. I tried posting on fb but I don't know if it went through? Either way, come one, come all, and make my day more interesting because it's not the most amazing event in the world, the people are what make it.

Anywho

Eww...this just happened across from me.

Why the fuck would u do that. Take your shoes off and lie down across the seat. His feet are on the arm restsssss. =.= some of his toes are bandaged up. Ugh. Gross.

I posted this nice, well balanced post about Dylan Moran the other day and it never published and it is now lost to the interwebs forever. ={

As usual with this kind of post, I'm on the train, not bothered preparing for my tut because I'm still half asleep. I'm in my list making mood, lists of what I want to buy, what I want to do, how I'm going to budget certain things. It's annoying because making the lists always makes me feel better, it puts me at ease knowing what I'm doing or planning to do but I know that I never actually stick with goals and something comes up and my beautiful budget gets slaughtered. Waste.

My last week or so is mighty blurry. My sleeping pattern got majorly screwed. I started going to bed at 5-7am and then not really knowing what I did for the rest of the time. My days have bled into each other and I haven't caught up on sleep. The main things I remember are going to see Dylan Moran on Tue with stef and Tim, helping Tim finish 2 different assessments at his uni, Newtown with mum, hearing about William, Thai food, mini pub crawls, Magic the fucking gathering =.= and Doctor Who.

Speaking of Magic the Gathering, I went to a hobby/gaming shop on wed (that took a LOT of backtracking to figure out) right near UTS, next to the KFC. I had never noticed it before, it's upstairs and is called Good Game. It was an odd experience for me, I'm still slowly adjusting to nerdyness and I don't mean wearing non-prescription glasses, reminiscing about old anime you watched as a kid or being smart. I mean, your (american movie/tv show) stereotypical nerd that plays dungeons and dragons in their basement, WOW, larps, cosplays, ps3/xbox/pc gaming junkies, movie buffs, comic book reading, goes to conventions and plays other collectable card games like yugio and Magic. I always laughed at the shows that depicted that stereotype because I had never actually come across people who came close to fitting that stereotype. I kind of just assumed it was a huge overexageration and not really relevant to Aus. Man was I wrong. I mean, yes I have dated Tim for over 2 years now and his friends all do those things to a certain degree but they're generally well rounded people who also have lives outside of their nerdyness.

Good Game was more hardcore though lol, it's half shop half tournament venue. They sell mainly Magic and Yugio cards, plus a few other card games, board games and guides but it's the bare bones when you compare it other hobby/gaming stores. I think the main focus is that they are a venue for people to play. They have daily tournaments, mainly yugio and Magic plus dungeons and dragons once in awhile I think. Apart from organised tournaments it's a place for people to meet and play those games with their friends. There was at least 4 pretty big groups playing when we walked in at around 3pm on wed. It was trippy, they all looked like UTS/UNSW guys, 98% azn at that point in time, out of about 40 people in the room I was the only girl in the room. It felt so wierd being in there, some of them even fit the physical stereotype. It was creepy. O.o

Lately Tim and his friends seem to be becoming more like the stereotypes lol, meeting in pretty big groups to play these games and nerding out pretty hard. It's nice, they're a pretty decent sized group of about 7 regulars but can expand easily to about 20 people. Plus more. It makes me wish I had interests lol! It really keeps them connected and they get all excited and shit and it seems like such an easy way to make new friends.

Sadly I have no interest in it whatsoever. I've been a part of that world for 2 years now and I still don't find any attraction to it. I really have tried investing myself in it. I've played all of their stuff, except for dungeons and dragons because I have a shit imagination when I'm sober, can't get into roleplaying and I think it's stupid how excited and engulfed they get into it. I've watched about 3 seasons of Doctor Who, watched manga, several comic book/action/cult movies, bought a fucking ps3 that just sits there, read certain books. I even finally joined in with their latest craze, Magic the Gathering. I gave in and let Tim teach me yesterday. I get the basics now, I still don't see the appeal, I even won my second game. Still nothing. I feel like after 2 years of trying, I can safely say, I'm not into that stuff. It bums me out a little because it brings Tim so much joy and I have so much contempt for it because I just don't understand, which is a bitch move I know, but I just don't get it!

Why is it fun!? I don't find any of it interesting and games make NO sense to me. I get so fucking bored, I think board games are worse though lol. I just don't get the motive, what is the end result. Sometimes I think people like the feeling they get when they win and chasing that high is a good enough reason to do something. But it's not for me. Winning brings me no emotion. The only time it does is when I'm forced to do something I think I will fail and then I don't and I get surprised and then I'm happy with myself, but I won't go back and do it again.

I hate feeling so boring, I just can't get into it and because it's not fun it seems like a massive waste of time and money. It's hard to put those feelings aside when Tim joins in and not think he's being a child and stupid for wasting his money on collectable shit. It's not a waste for them because they enjoy it and I have to keep reminding myself that and stop being such a judegmental bitch. Gah I can be so closed minded about some things =.=

Anyway. More later. As usual I'm late for uni. The rains made it worse.

Side note: I can't stand Daniel Radcliffe and Carter's performance blew me away so I think she deserves her face on the main poster =D

On another, film related note. I watched the 8th Harry Potter movie when it came out and never got around to writing about it. I was disappointed as usual, I haven't enjoyed any of the films but I think that is because I used to love the books so much when I was a kid. My main points are:

1. Harry Potter's character has always felt unbelievable, he's so flat and I can't really understand any of his behavior. I find it so odd because all of Rowling's characters are very well thought out. Daniel Radcliffe's horrific acting doesn't help the case either. His emotional range is so stunted.

2. Helena Bonham Carter is a fucking brilliant actor. She blew me AWAY in the last movie. She was all I could think about for the rest of the film. There is a scene in the movie where Hermione drinks polyjuice potion to look like Bellatrix Lestrange (Helena's character). So obviously to film that they got Helena Bonham Carter to act like Hermione acting like Bellatrix. Then put Hermione's voice over that.
She was fucking outstanding! She nailed it 100% It was like she was channeling Emma Watson's acting of Hermione Granger. Absolutely remarkable, she picked up such subtle mannerisms that really embody Emma Watson's interpretation of Hermione. Amazing. Sooo many of the older actors were legions ahead of Daniel, Emma and Rupert, there was such a huge, blatantly obvious difference in their skill sets. It was frustrating, it was all I could focus on in the movie.

Sadly I couldn't find the actual clip but if you're really interested, there is a tiny snippet of Carter talking about the experience in this, it kinda starts at 35seconds but parts are slow, lol Carter spends ages on her phone looking for something and never finds it.

3. I also couldn't get over the fact that no one has acknowledged Rowling's ?hommage? to 'Bedknobs and Broomsticks'. It bugs me that no one else knows what I'm talking about when I've brought it up. Now I know that 'Bedknobs and Broomsticks' was based off a few books so maybe it's a direct reference to the books...wh0 knows. Anyway if you don't follow. In the book, page 489, Professor McGonagall produces a spell that protects the castle by bringing life to all the statues and suits of armour.

'And now, piertotum locomotor!' cried Professor McGonagall.
And all along the corridor the statues and suits of armour jumped down from their plinths, and from the echoing crashes from the floors above and below, Harry knew that their fellows throughout the castle had done the same.
'Hogwarts is threatened!' shouted Professor McGonagall. ' Man the boundaries, protect us, do your duty to our school!'
Clattering and yelling, the horde of moving statues stampeded past Harry; some of them smaller, others larger than life. There were animals too, and the clanking suits of armour brandished swords and spiked balls on chains.

In the movie it is depicted with Maggie Smith giving an all too knowing smile for my liking, it made me wonder what she was thinking. In the book it is done with more of a tone of urgency, whereas in the film it's a moment of pride and determination. Here is a very nice compilation of some of the scenes in the movie when the statues come to life. The soundtrack is amazing, i felt that it was sort of muddled and lost in the film but that's probably because of all the screaming and explosions.

The song is called 'Statues' and was composed by Alexandre Desplat. It's so fucking powerful on it's own. I love movie soundtracks, the ones with the really epic sounding songs. 'Gladiator' has the most amazing soundtrack ugh <3 or 'Les Choristes'

That little clip is 100 times more moving than the film, than the actual moments it's showing. crazy.

And finally, the scene from 'Bedknobs and Broomsticks'. Hopefully you saw this movie when you were a kid at some point. It's actually from 1971 but still, this scene used to scare the crap out of me when I was little. Actually quite a few of the scenes in this movie are quite dark. There are a lot of moments thrown in there about WW2.

SOOOO can you see it now?

=]

I haven't been able to find any interviews with J.K.Rowling or any comments about the similarity between the two moments =[ except for a loosely based definition in urban dictionary:

Harry Potter: A very dull series of books written by J K Rowling. Mostly plaigarised, stealing ideas from various sources such as Lord of the Rings and Bedknobs and Broomsticks, of all places. Follows the fate of Harry Potter and his journey through Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The kind of books to read when you're on a plane and have nothing better to do besides gnawing off your own arm. And for all the Americans, it's Harry Potter and the PHILOSOPHER'S Stone.

Me : "I really wanted to like Harry Potter, but I got distracted every other line trying to remember where that idea was stolen from."

I feel much better now that I got that off my chest lol, it's been lingering in my head since I watched it like a month ago.
ta!
xx

Today is one of those days where I will quickly become stir crazy. Everyone is out with their stupid families celebrating fathers day. I'M BORED and everyone is at family BBQ's and picnics and crap ugh

ENTERTAIN ME. I couldn't even go to Tim's house and creepily watch their festivities either because his dad was all like...NO outsiders *sigh*

so here I am...infront of a fucking computer, again. Bored with nothing interesting to do but watch tv shows and movies..alone. LAME

So instead let's try to recap some things.

I've gotten really into Breaking Bad:

It's really intense, I love it. It feels so real and grimey. Touches a few sore spots but it's a well made show with great acting. I finished the first season yesterday and I think there are 4 out at the moment.

wiki:

Set and produced in Albuquerque, New Mexico, Breaking Bad is the story of Walter White (Bryan Cranston), a struggling high school chemistry teacher who is diagnosed with advanced lung cancer at the beginning of the series. He turns to a life of crime, producing and selling methamphetamine with a former student, Jesse Pinkman (Aaron Paul), with the aim of securing his family's financial future before he dies.

Breaking Bad has received widespread critical acclaim, particularly for its writing and cinematography as well as for Cranston's and Paul's performances. It has won six Emmy Awards—including three consecutive wins for Lead Actor in a Drama Series for Cranston—in addition to numerous other awards and nominations.

Brilliant. But I will admit, I started watching it when it first came out and the first episode totally lost me, I turned it off after about 15mins. I only started enjoying it when Tim made me watch the 2nd episode 2 years later. It was hard to get used to, they don't use music like most other shows, there is a lot of silence in really intense moments as opposed to music. Plus they never really use music to direct your emotional response like some shows try to do, you know like play something that sounds comical to emphasize the fact that you should be laughing. I think that has probably thrown me off the most, there are some moments where I HAVE laughed, it's just that the show has never imposed it on me and it almost makes me feel like I'm laughing at the wrong times.

Hmm a show that gives you the freedom to choose.

I'm also kind of excited about this:

'The Tunnel'
My mum told me about it, I was only so intrigued because she made it sound like an actual documentary and I was like...WTF are you talking about, homeless people being killed in Sydney underground tunnels. CRAZY TALK. But I was fascinated, after a second of searching I find out it's a thriller mockumentary which bummed me out a little. They tend to have disappointing endings. I was hoping it was real. That's kind of morbid. I'm sorry homeless people =[

What I got more excited about was the model that it used for distribution. This has only come to make so much sense to me and feel like an important issue since hearing Kevin Smith talk about it for hours on his podcasts. There is something liberating and inherently kool about doing things your own way and breaking the mold. It's hard for me to explain because I'm not a movie buff but basically, Kevin Smith produced a film called Red State without going through the traditional means of distribution and funding. Funnily enough, it is also in the horror/thriller genre.

Instead of asking a movie company to take on the cost of funding, backing his movie and distributing it, he did it all himself with the help of anyone willing to donate money. Now that is a really LAME explanation of what he did because it was actually pretty amazing, he's actually made money from his movie too. That is the main difference between 'The Tunnel' and 'Red State'...now don't quote me on this, but I'm fairly sure 'The Tunnel' was more willing to just make a movie without the aim of making profit (not a huge one at least). Instead of releasing it to cinema, they WILLINGLY uploaded it online so that anyone can download it. They are however selling it on DVD if anyone wants to buy it.

'Red State' has never been free in any way and at least to me, not as accessible because it never got released to cinema except for some places around the States when Kevin toured the movie. Since I live in Australia, his touring did nothing for me. You can download the movie from a few places at cost, like itunes or amazon...I'm not 100% sure actually, I think it's more of a rental system as opposed to always having access to it and some countries can't access it from certain sites. The problem with that for me is that I don't buy things online usually. I'm working on it though! I ordered my visa debitcard, should be in sometime this week =D I can finally watch 'Red State'...lol after hearing every intricate detail of how it was produced for over a year, I can finalllly see if I actually like it. I hope I do, because the way he talked about it was really inspiring and exciting.

I hope it's not like when I watched Small Town Gaybar. I started off listening to the director's podcasts (Blow Hard- by Malcom Ingraham) which I really loved, so I finally got round to watching his documentary and expected a lot more, especially after everyone kept mentioning that it premiered at Sundance? Maybe I'm wrong..and it won a few Gay film awards. I was severely disappointed. It felt like such sloppy work, sure it showed what the lives of certain individuals were like but I felt that it was lacking in direction. He left it too open for interpretation and kind of feeling like...awesome, thanks for telling me that life sucks for some people, but now what. Are you going to do something about it? Are you going to tell me how to help? Is anything being done at all! WHAT WAS YOUR POINT! There was no narration at all, I guess it's a little odd that I EXPECT to be persuaded when I watch a documentary.

Anyway, back to my main point. I'm excited about 'The Tunnel', it has just finished downloading and I really want to watch it with Tim...but he will probably chicken out or not watch it because I want to *sigh*. SO i might watch it...alone :( How depressing lol. I'm also excited because it's filmed in Sydney! I'm always at Central and Town Hall stations, several times a week XD It's going to feel a lot more real...I hope.

Also...I've probably done a terrible job at describing wtf I'm talking about so here is a better article.

I'm on my way home from my new graduate interview. I think it went really well ^.^ Doing the interview for that mental health position reallllllly helped. It meant I was familiar with the format and I knew the place much better this time round now that I work there. I didn't get lost at all and was an hour early XD

I'm so glad I prepared and that I had practiced the exact questions I was asked. Well...the only one that wasn't exact was the prioritizing question but I knew it was coming and how to answer it no matter what kind of scenarios were used ^.^ nom. I'm so glad. I think I have a really good chance of getting a position at Livo. The only thing stopping me now is if I fail this semester lol.

Yayyyy. So close to finishing. Which is weird that I'm sorta looking forward to it. I'm glad uni will be over just because it's such a hassle and generally feels like a waste of money and time BUT the idea of actually working and being 100% accountable scares the crap out of me. Either way, it's another little milestone in my life. It means a lot, a whole new way of life and something that my life will revolve around for a very long time. At least the next five years. Eventually I plan on studying more. In the same area of nursing but I don't know specifically what and how that is going to go down. The sooner the better I suppose but I do need to wait until I've got enough fundamental experience before I start specializing.

Back to uni being a waste of time and money. I don't mean uni is a total waste, obviously it is a means to an end, one I can't legally reach without completing a degree as proof that I will be a competent nurse, BUT I feel like I've paid too much for services I haven't received. I have learnt NOTHING in class, my teachers have been pretty useless but in a way, they're not bad uni teachers. They do what uni teachers are meant to do, direct you in the right path and show you where to find the right info. I just feel that having so many tutorial teachers is a waste. I basically live off the info that is put online by the coordinator of the subject. The material covered in class is what is in the text book and can be understood just from reading the books so it's not like it's extra material that you're missing out on if you don't pay attention in class or miss one. The only subjects that I agree with doing in class are practicals but even then...I've learnt more on the job and from people who weren't even my teachers. I see going to class as more of a motivational tool than anything else.

So one day I was hanging out with Kurt and we realised that there are some pretty wacky sayings in the spanish language.
Each Spanish speaking country has their own sayings, metaphors and similies but these are a few that I have collected over the last year or so.
Every time I hear my mum or grandma say a new one I text Kurt XD It has become somewhat of a little tradition for me now =]

Saying: La negrita astuta vende fruta.Direct Translation: The (Astute, cunning, sly, crafty, fraudulent) cute/little black girl sells fruit.Meaning: This saying is said as a sort of warning that you are/someone else is a cocktease

Saying: No calientes el agua (si no vas a tomar té)Direct Translation: Don't heat the water if you're not going to drink teaMeaning: This is also a sort of warning to someone who is being a cocktease. Kind of like, don't flirt and lead someone on if you have no intention of hooking up with them. It is also a play on words because in Spanish (Chilean at least) the word calentar (to heat) is also used informally as a way to say 'make horny'. So 'estoy caliente' = I'm hot BUT it means I'm horny. If you wanted to say I'm hot (because of the weather) you would say 'tengo calor'

Saying:Buscarle la quinta pata al gatoDirect Translation:To look for the 5th leg of the cat Meaning: Looking for problems when there clearly aren't any in that situation, so you're over thinking it and overcomplicating yourself.

Saying: Para ser bella hay que ver estrellasDirect Translation: To be beautiful you have to see starsMeaning: I'm guessing this is a fairly old saying because my grandad said it to me once, I kind of fell in love with this little rhyme/mantra. It means that no pain is too great to endure in order to look your best, this particularly refers to women having to wear painful shoes (stilettos) because it makes their legs look hot, wearing tight clothing to show off curves, waxing, plucking, dying hair, and I suppose nowadays you could extend that into getting cosmetic surgery. Just to clarify, my grandad wasn't a dick, I remember the saying coming up because we were watching a show with really attractive women and I was in awe of them and he explained that constructed superficial beauty comes at a price =) Oh and if you don't get the imagery, it's based on seeing "stars" when you hit your head/get dizzy, like if you've ever seen the cartoon representation of stars around the head when they get hit.

*To be continued

To Do.

Here's a list of some of the things I would like to do or accomplish or places I want to visit in my lifetime =]

* I have already been there, done that or started to read that but would like to do it again or complete the task
-- The task is completed and I don't feel the need to do a repeat