Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

August 27, 2007

BOYS VS. GIRLS

The past two weeks have been High-School-Musical-2-a-Palooza around our house. If you don't have a daughter in the age range of about 6 through about 12, you probably have no idea what I'm talking about. But if you do, then you know that this is the biggest thing in the history of the world, even bigger than High School Musical 1. If you can imagine. It's the story of some high-school kids who are just like high-school kids everywhere except that they're all in their 20s and they spend the vast majority of their time performing elaborate musical song-and-dance numbers that your daughter wants to listen to several million times per day.

At least it's wholesome. I attended a birthday party over the weekend for an 11-year-old boy, and his most-prized gift was a video game called Destroy All Humans 2. I watched a little of it, and the only similarity between it and High School Musical 2 that I could detect is the "2."

My 25-year-old sister watched the whole thing, giving me a detailed analysis and criticism as she watched. Only after about an hour did she burst out laughing and admit that she thought it was ridiculous, had only the vaguest idea what the plot was (she was actually channel-surfing) and then got insulted that I believed her ruse, as "I'm too old for this stuff, Jemmy!"

i'm so glad i finally caught high school musical (one) last night! i saw the final 5 minutes of it once (an EXTREMELY elaborate song and dance number) and was bewildered by what seemed to be an impossible and ridiculously contrived whole-school-participating extravaganza. in no known high school would the nerds and the jocks and the drama geeks ever even come near each other, much less dance together, touch each other, and sing the same song.

anyway, turns out the whole movie is like that. go figure! schools are different now, i guess. in fact, the very first musical number in the movie is when the math-geek girl (who is nonetheless REALLY cute, thin, and fashionably dressed) and the basketball-jock boy (who is nonetheless not even tall, and actually speaks in complete sentences) are thrust upon a stage, and, without ever having spoken to each other before, instantly perform a "karaoke" tune that no one has ever heard before with perfect harmony and zero errors. so it's pretty realistic.

but still, there are moments of wonder.

for instance, it is pretty hard to believe the drama teacher would change the date of the tryouts on the say-so of one of the two couples trying out, to the afternoon when the entire school will be at the math-geek competition AND the basketball championships. but the rest of the movie, such as the computer 'glitch' which causes the entire gym to empty into the drama tryouts so the audience will cheer for the math-geek girl and the basketball-star boy while they sing, and then they go right back to the basketball championship game after the song is over, and no one gets in any trouble, is totally believable.

Well...if they're in their 20's and still in High School it must have been shot here in Okie-homa .... on the other hand, Okie high-schoolers trying to dance would hurt themselves and each other....and trying to sing, would most likely burst everyone's ear drums.
So, it's a mystery.............

My daughters are 16 and starting their Sr. year. They went to a High School Musical opening party with their friends where they watched the old one and then the new one. This was considered fun! Should I be worried?

In keeping with my ongoing Mission In Life to educate those sorely in need..........let me say this.
There is a giant hole in space. Where's there's absolutely NOTHING. No, really. Not even someone singing OOOOOOOOOO-klahoma. Where, by the way, I have never seen a single stalk of corn. Not even one as high as a cat's eye.

see, the difference between boys playing destroy all humans 2 and girls watching high squeal musical is that the boys are well aware that destroy is fantasy, where as the girls truly believe that high squeal is real life.

And, um, ma'am, you're absolutely right, this movie has no resemblance whatsoever to any sort of reality. But I must admit, I love that my 8 and 10 year old daughters are so into a Disney series that resembles a Frankie Avalon/Annette Funicello beach movie (except with fewer beach blankets and more blond highlights and iPods and such,) stupidity notwithstanding.

However, I'm totally buying that whole Hogwarts/magic beans/lightning shaped scar on the forehead thing in those other movies about high school kids, cause that stuff really happens.

*runs away and hopes that The All Powerful SB laughs instead of blocking my IP address*

I agree with you DeskDiva. My 10 year old daughter as well as my 12 year old son had a huge viewing party at our house with hubby and I supplying snacks as well as context. Context meaning telling the kids that the musical scene in the pool was not an original idea. Watch any Esther Williams movie from the 40's (I think) and you'll see the inspiration. All the kids had a great time and I for one am happy to see one show that glorifies wholesome, smart teens.
That being said, I am seriously tired of the soundtrack already, as it is all my daughter is listening to.

kdf: if HSM had a "fantasy" sticker on its spine, like HP does, i wouldn't say a word ;)

actually i really like HSM and am also glad kids are watching it. my daughter would totally have loved it if she were about 15 years younger. just once i'd like for the "ugly duckling" female character to NOT be the cutest girl in the school, and weigh 84 pounds, and have great clothes, and possibly actually leave her glasses ON when she becomes popular (not that this girl even had glasses to start with, but you know, they always take them off and THEN they are "beautiful"... but no one who wears glasses is EVER considered beautiful).

BUT, I agree. My kids were very excited when Grease was on TV recently, and I watched it with them, remembering it somewhat vaguely from what... 25 years ago?

I was totally horrified to be reminded of the movie's primary message: "get your guy back by trading in your bangs and hair ribbons for a rockin' perm, heavy makeup, and tight black leather clothes. Then, drive off into the sunset to celebrate the self-destruction of your individuality.