Hateful words still ring in her ears years later

When Charlotte was 1, she had to have tubes put into her ears. She had to be given a sedative to make her sleepy so they could take her away from me.

When Charlotte was 1, she had to have tubes put into her ears. She had to be given a sedative to make her sleepy so they could take her away from me.

I watched the nurse carry my floppy baby girl away from me. Her blonde hair cascaded over the nurse's shoulder and spilled down her back. It was just a simple little procedure but my heart ached watching her being carried away like a rag doll.

We waited anxiously in the waiting room. Another couple was there. They too had a little girl having a procedure done.

The mother looked nervous. The dad looked relaxed and was actually quite chatty. He started telling me about his neighbor. He was a corrections officer and competed in strong man competitions.

I really was half listening because I was too concerned about my little baby and really did not care about a stranger's neighbor.

But then he said it. He said that his neighbor was so strong that he didn't doubt for a minute how tough he must be on the (insert N word here) at the prison.

He said it like he was discussing the weather. He said it with so much confidence; his wife didn't even bat an eye.

I, however, bristled. Then I saw David put his newspaper down and stare at the man. Oh no. Please David, I thought to myself. Don't do this here. I eyeballed him and he met my glare with a nod.

I immediately cut the man off and didn't listen to another hateful word oozing out of his mouth.

David was at the mall the other day and took Olivia with him. He had to take care of some cellphone business. The salesperson behind the counter began to recount a story to him and BAM! Dropped the N word just like that in front of my little girl.

David sent Olivia away to go look at something and looked at the salesman and said "Stop what you're saying and get back to your job."

He said a few other things, all perfectly respectful, yet to the point letting the man know he would not tolerate his hatred.

As I write this, DOMA has been declared unconstitutional by the Supreme Court of the United States. I can't tell you how happy I am about that.

David called me as I was running around with the girls earlier and asked if I was listening to the news. I wasn't, so he clued me in. I cheered and the girls asked what I was happy about.

They didn't think much of it because here in our home we teach equality. We teach acceptance. We teach that despite the lottery system that is your birth and how you don't have a hand in it, we are all made of blood and bones and skin.

And we all are capable of love.

I think about that other little girl sometimes from the hospital and her hateful father.