1. The principal is to be addressed as Mr. Johnson, not "Fuhrer".2. Not allowed to wear a "Guy Fawkes" mask to the pep rally.3. Not allowed to replace everybody's sheet music in Choir with the lyrics to Sir Mix-a-Lot's "I Like Big Butts".4. Can't use a batch file in Tech to scare the crap out of paranoid kids.5. "Humans VS Zombies" is not authorized free period use.6. The Halloween party is not an excuse to wear pants on my head.7. Can't publicly humiliate bullies, no matter how much they deserved it.8. Can't wear short shorts to class, even if the girls can.9. Just because a fellow student has poor knowledge of racial minorities is not an excuse to tell him that my bibimbap is made with dog.10. I am not allowed to have access to a spoon, the Music room, and a pack of gummy bears at the same time.11. Can't rub my 3.9 GPA in the parents of other student's faces.12. Can't yell, "NERF BALL! I CHOOSE YOU!" during dodgeball.13. If the assignment asks me to describe something I'd like to have, I can't put down "sniper rifles" and then describe the Arctic Warfare Magnum in detail, and what exactly it does to a human's head.14. I'm only allowed to read "Time" and "Newsweek" at home- not at Study Hall in front of the other kids who are reading "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" and "Twilight".15. Not allowed to annoy the conservative teachers.16. Not allowed to annoy the liberal teachers as well.17. When the substitute teacher asks for my name, I cannot respond with "Inigo Montoya" or "Ash Ketchum of Pallet Town".18. Don't convince any of the girls that regular showers are linked to skin cancer.19. Can't play a cover of "Another Brick in the Wall" at the talent show.20. Neither can I perform any Michael Jackson songs.21. Can't threaten to use "Buddhist black magic rituals" on the evangelistic white kid.22. Eating a bagel is not allowed in the middle of the school musical of "Diary of a Wimpy Kid".23. If one of my friends is sent to the principal's office, I cannot come along with him and claim that I'm his "defense attorney". 24. Can't demonstrate how one can drink a cheeseburger.25. Cannot organize a Drama Club and then abuse my powers within to start a production of "The Wall".26. Can't bribe twenty other kids to climb up on the tables and sing "It's a Hard Knock Life" with me.27. Can't convince the n00b substitute teacher that I'm a foreign exchange student and then use nothing but Korean for the rest of class.28. Can't explain to other kids what red food coloring is actually made of.29. Under no circumstances am I to randomly burst into song during a test.30. No challenging anybody to a staring competition, due to what happened on 10/21/10.

31. A Monopoly "Get Out of Jail" card does not exempt me from detention.32. No jerry-rigging weapons out of school supplies.33. I cannot refer to the co-ed swimming class as "The Hour of Blue Balls".34. No mimicking Banksy's art on the school walls, even if it is with chalk.35. I will not replace the grumpy ol' English teacher's eyedrops with industrial lubricant.36. Pudding is not a religion.37. Even though it's okay for kids to wear those "I <3 BOOBIES" wristbands, I cannot wear one saying "WHAT WOULD YOUR MOTHER SAY?"38. Can't sell mocktails to kids during lunch.39. I am not a pony trapped inside a tween's body.40. Can't set up a psychiatrist booth.

41. I shall not run for student council president and only to get involved in a scandal involving the Secretary and copious amounts of Red Bull.42. The Halloween party is not a place to perform Pagan rituals.43. If I am asked to give a few words at the end-of-year ceremony, "Drink your Ovaltine," "Ooga booga boo," "I like pudding," and any quotations from Dr. Seuss books are not acceptable.44. "American Idiot" is not to be performed on school grounds.45. At the Spring Dance, I cannot lace the punch with laxatives. 46. I shall not make fun of the emo kids.47. No attempting to act out the events of "High School Musical", songs and all, with a group of likeminded students.48. Organizing a school-wide Black Ops fundraiser tournament is not allowed.49. Addendum to 41- If I am to run for student council president, and win, I will not go up on stage for my acceptance speech, and then go into a long diatribe of how the student council is merely a puppet government created by the school board to give us "sheeple" the illusion of control.50. Similarly, I cannot spread dissent under the guise of "V" from the movie "V for Vendetta".

51. I am not "The Earl of Sandwich" and cannot order teachers to address me as such.52. The "Furby" is not a weapon of mass destruction and should not be treated as such.53. No clambering on the desks akin to a monkey and making noises to accompany it.54. "Let us FUDGE!" is not an acceptable quotation for the yearbook.55. I am not allowed to say, "That's right- s*** just got real," after everything my pre-algebra teacher says.56. Minecraft is not a Geology teaching aid.57. I can't sell "Orange cocaine" (read: ground up orange PEZ) to the stupid rich kids who think they're being rebellious by doing so.58. My desk is not my own country, and I am not the dictator of it.59. Being disalarmingly pacifist in the Wrestling unit of Gym is not allowed.60. Twinky is not allowed to address himself from the third person.61. I cannot threaten other kids that I will "Stick my hand up their butt, and work their mouth like a puppet."

62. If I sign up for the school newspaper, and are assigned the dating advice column to my dismay, I cannot reply to each letter with anything along the lines of "Give that b**** a X- b****** loooove X."63. It is grossly inappropriate to run through the halls screaming "GEEKS AND CHILDREN FIRST" during a fire drill. It is even more inappropriate to do so during an actual fire.64. The rules of the school do not begin with "1. No talking about *school name*" and "2. No talking about *school name*."65. Our school is not "Oceania" and our rivals are not "Eastasia" and "Eurasia".

66. Neotokyo, as fun as it is, is not to be played in the middle of Graphic Design.67. I cannot randomly smash objects surrounding me, and then blame it on violent rap music. (Credit to Harrow for this 'un.)68. It is funny when I replace the music for Gym with "Can't Touch This". It is not funny when I do the same with the national anthem at assembly.

69. Lunch hour is not a time to see what kind of weapon I can make with only mashed potatos and the utensils.70. My milkshake, contrary to popular belief, does not bring all the boys to the yard. 71. I cannot provide color commentary on an episode of "South Park" and submit it to my Civics teacher as "4th Graders as Depicted in the Media: A Study".72. The bowling ball pendulum hanging from the ceiling is meant for the physics lab report- not for pulling back and concussing people with it.73. "Black Ops" is not an acceptable study aid for the Vietnam unit. 74. A q-tip and lemon juice are not to be used in lieu of a pencil.75. If a teacher asks me a question, I cannot reply with anything along the lines of "I am not here at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep. BEEEEEEEEEEEEP."76. I cannot disprove the saying "The pen is mightier than the sword" with an actual sword.77. I cannot bring a retrofitted t-shirt cannon for the sole purpose of starting a food fight.78. I cannot thwack people on the head with my "Grammar Hammer" every time they say something stupid.79. I will not use twisty-ties from bread packages to create a Masonic symbol.80. No procrastinating.

81. I cannot attempt to hold up the lunch counter with a Pez dispenser.82. No scribbling "ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH" onto the Student Council election posters.83. I will not claim "THAT EQUATION IS A SPAH!" in Pre-al.84. No jacking into the intercom system to loudly broadcast Guns N' Roses "Welcome to the Jungle".84.5. Especially during finals week.85. If I am asked to do a report on my favorite American, I cannot put down Charlie Sheen.86. The following terms are not to be used in an English poem- Noodle incident, squid, Chinese McDonalds, or chicken fingers.87. I cannot perform a science experiment based off of the question "How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?"88. If I am billed to perform music at the next pep rally, "Revolution" by the Beatles is not to be played.89. During the Halloween Party, I cannot lift up one of the ceiling tiles and poke my head through various holes to provide a suitable backdrop for my "Ceiling Cat" costume.90. I am not to exploit holes in the PC security system to make the computers uncontrollably play "Nyan Cat" for the entire duration they are turned on.

91. I am not allowed to imitate QWOP on the track.92. I am not allowed to say "space pirate" when a teacher asks me what I want to be when I grow up.93. If a guest speaker is teaching about evolution, I cannot yell "PICS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN."94. Even if there's nothing in the rules for it, I cannot wear my SPARTAN-III costume to school.95. I cannot wear a meat suit and perform Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" at the talent show.96. Nor can I paint myself blue in a tribute to the Blue Man Group.97. Same goes for Ke$ha and glitter.98. If I make a good move in Chess Club, I cannot yell, "WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?"99. No threatening a bully that I will "love and tolerate the S*** out of them."100. During the Pledge of Allegiance, under no circumstances am I to say in place, "I pledge allegiance, to the flag, of the United States of Equestria. And to the friendship, for which it stands, one nation, under Celestia, with liberty and cupcakes for all.101. During a mock courtroom scenario in Civics, I am not allowed to throw my backpack at the opposition ala Phoenix Wright.102. On Debate team, I ma not to call the other team "doo-dooheads" during the session.103. I cannot set my Science Powerpoint to "Miracles" by the Insane Clown Posse.104. During my speech for Student Council president, I am not to promise "to be the best puppet leader we'll ever have."105. I cannot blame anything on leprechauns.

In my opinion, LEGO has only gotten better over the last few years, and I don't think that'll change anytime soon.

Not everyone will be aware of this, but during the 1990s and early 2000s, LEGO was in serious financial trouble - they were losing money. A lot of this was down to bad decisions when it came to innovation and direction. That all changed in 2004, when LEGO appointed a new CEO who brought around a few changes in mentality for LEGO. Since then, the brand's made a comeback - in a big way.

Over the last few years, we've had a bunch of old lines - long since dead - rebooted. Kingdoms replaced the old Castle line, and honestly? I think it's a heck of a lot better. We've gone from this:

To this:

To me, that's an improvement. LEGO has updated the design while still maintaining some of the 'old' and blending it with the 'new'. The castle has the same basic structure, only now it's a little more decorated and a little more playable.

The same thing has happened with a lot of the 'revamps' - Power Miners, NinjaGo, Pirates and Pharaoh's Quest to name a few. A lot of the old sets have been updated for a new generation, with smarter construction, better designs, cooler minifigs and some neat concepts that distinguish them from their spiritual ancestors. Sure, Raines is no Johnny Thunder, but he isn't meant to be.

LEGO has also come up with a bunch of new themes you seem to have skipped over. The 'Fantasy Era' line they released is one of the coolest I've seen - I mean, it had orcs, dwarves, elves, armies of skeletons and heaps of new parts and sets! That's hardly the only line they've come up with; Space Police was pretty awesome, as was the Agents line. The upcoming Monster Hunters sets look sweet, and don't forget the Collectible Minifigures line which continues to amaze me. Sure, some of the ideas have clearly drawn from older lines, but that's not a bad thing.

And don't dismiss the licensed sets. Although some of us are sick of Star Wars by now, the sets are still pretty cool and throw out a bunch of new parts with every release. We've also now got awesome lines like the Pirates of the Caribbean sets, Marvel/DC, and Lord of the Rings - who wouldn't want their own Jack Sparrow, Iron Man and Aragorn minifigs? Some people might moan and groan about the flesh coloured figs, but oh well - you can easily replace most of the heads and hands with yellow replacements your own collection, and all that'll really happen is a slightly mismatched neckline for some figs. Besides, if licensed sets aren't up your alley, just remember - LEGO is a business, and licensed sets sell. If they're out there making money that lets LEGO make more awesome original themes, then fantastic!

Finally, don't forget that LEGO is a business, and a lot of its decisions have to be made from that perspective. As sad as it is, businesses need to make money, and although LEGO seems to try to be good to its AFOL and TFOL followers, they're ultimately not the primary market. LEGO has to play to its core group - the kids - and anything else is really just a bonus. Sometimes, this is great for AFOLS and children alike; kids get to have Aragorn battle Shelob while they fire missiles from a ballista, while AFOLs finally get Lord of the Rings sets they can build dioramas from and use in their own creations. But sometimes, the nature of LEGO means AFOLs get a bit disappointed - and in this case, it seems LEGO tries to find a comrpomise. The Collectible Minifig line seems largely aimed at AFOLs; LEGO might not be able to make a line featuring zombies, but they can sure throw together a minifig for us to nab.

When it comes down to it, LEGO is a toy, and toys are made for people to have fun with. As long as LEGO keeps making bricks, I'm sure even the grumpiest fan will enjoy playing with them in their own way.

NAME: LON QUILLOW
GENDER: MALE
HAIR COLOR: STRAW BLONDE
EYE COLOR: GREEN
DISTINGUISHING PHYSICAL/FACIAL FEATURES: LON is distinguishable from the other PEASANTS for his SHORTNESS, which results in many AWKWARD SITUATIONS when he tries to do work that requires at least some degree of tallness.

Okay, first of all, I drew another pony thing. I have spoilered it so as not to offend the delicate sensibilities of our less pony-inclined members.WARNING: CONTAINS PONIES. CLICK AT YOUR OWN RISK:

Spoiler

Maegan and I were speculating what Spike might look like when he gets older, and I drew this:Yep, Rarity still finds a use for him.

Now, on to more serious matters...

Stormkrag, the Scourge of Midgard

Deep within the endless peaks of the Jagged Edge, an ambitious elder dragon and her two young sons sought to overthrow the dread reign of Stormkrag, the Scourge of Midgard, self-proclaimed Lord of All Dragons. Warned by his Giant allies as a token gesture of loyalty (though they dared not help him in the actual battle), Stormkrag moved his colossal form outside of his volcanic home for the first time in over a hundred years. His stiff joints creaked, his hide cracked, his metallic patches on old wounds ground and scraped together. One blazing eye opened wide, taking in the surroundings. On the opposite side of his broad, spiked head, a rune etched in the surface of an iron eyepatch glowed fiery red.

Out stretched his ragged wings, wide enough to cast a shadow over all of Urbas Imperia, capital city of the Empire, should he so desire. His claws, each longer than a man is tall, dug deeply into the ash and igneous stone beneath his feet. He walked with a slight limp, his left hind leg still bearing the metallic cast forged by his Jotnar allies. He hardly noticed the impediment. A cloud of smoke belched forth from his throat, with flashes of flame and red lightning visible within it, like a raging volcanic thunderstorm, as he opened his massive jaws to let out a thunderous roar. Miles away, farmers on both sides of the Jagged Edge paused in their work as this dreadful sound was carried to their ears.

Climbing slowly but surely atop a slab of ebon stone, he saw the would-be usurpers approaching from the north, their hides shining like jewels in the sunlight as they flew... until they passed under the shadow of the ever-present smoke above Vulcan's Furance, the towering volcano at the center of Midgard where Stormkrag made his home.

Perhaps the oldest living dragon in the Mortal Realm, Stormkrag had fought many battles like this before. Countless heroes, giants, and lesser dragons had sought to defeat him since he declared his title, moving his hoard into such a position of prominence. All of them had failed. These three whelps would be no different. Still, he had grown too comfortable in his position. More than a century without a challenge had been far too long. As his foes grew nearer, he felt the old flames stir within his ancient heart.

Yes, it would be good to taste battle again. It would be well past his thousandth time. It would be their last.

I'm getting sick of "story-driven" games. For a developer to even suggest their game is going to have a large focus on story is an insult. I enjoy a good story as much as anybody else but it shouldn't be a "focus." If you need a good story to read try a book, they are much much better for that purpose. I play video GAMES to enjoy GAMEPLAY not to hear the sob story of some blockhead and his daughter/wife/mother/pet/gay alien buttbuddy.

I got into cosplay in the past year or so, and I have started working on one of the projects I have lined up for Phoenix Comic-Con this year.

Malcolm Reynolds!

Spoiler

Spoiler

I still have to get gloves, fix the suspenders, and a proper Mal pistol.

I'm also planning on doing red suit Dr. Horrible and Zaeed Massani (from the Mass Effect games). The Zaeed one should be an interesting challenge, since it will be my first costume that will involve armor crafting.

How it works-At the start of every month, a new challenge is provided. The challenge will be provided in the first post of this topic (replacing the spot of the previous challenge), and given as a post further on in the topic as an indication that the new challenge has begun.

-This challenge will contain only a few requirements.-Subject: These can be as detailed or broad as desired. This subject can be a setting, object, character, or even simply a theme. You must build your story around this subject, and it must be central to the plot. (Will start very broad. Will gladly accept suggestions.)-Word Count: A minimum and maximum for the length of your story. These can vary, and if you find the length to be unreasonable in some way, it may be flexible/negotiable.-Style: In some cases, it might be interesting to limit entries to a first/third person narrative (or some other style), just to mix things up a little.-Deadline: Generally the end of the month or near the end of the month.

-Interested writers post their entries as a topic in the Art & Writing forum. They then post a link to their entry in this topic, using the form given below.

-Soon after the deadline (preferably within a few days or a week) a winner will be announced. The next challenge’s start will not wait for this judgment.

That’s all there is to it! Well, save a few other details, such as...

Rules-Obviously, for an entry to be considered valid, it must follow the challenge requirements.

-Keep content within Illikon Schola forum rules. If you wish to submit an M-Rated story, simply post it in the M-Rated content forum, and obviously note where needed on the entry form.

-The contest is open to all SSLF members (freebies, novas, mods, admins), save those judging. (See below for details on judging). Only SSLF members may enter.

-Stories must be never-before posted on this forum. Preferably not written beforehand as well, but you will not be disqualified for putting forth a story you had started before the challenge, providing it hadn’t been posted on the forums.

-Stories should be a one-piece short story unless otherwise stated. It can be divided into chapters if you wish, but it still should be posted all at once. This is to prevent the submission of unfinished entries.

-You may enter multiple entries if you so wish. If this becomes a problem for any reason (which it shouldn’t), limits may have to be instated.

These rules can be debated in the earlier stages of the contest, as some may prove to be flawed. Otherwise, failure to comply with rules will invalidate entries.

There are some significant details that still need to be ironed out, namely...

Hosting, Judging, and Prizes

Hosting: I’d be cool with hosting and keeping this topic updated as the contest goes on. I imagine you guys will have your own ideas for challenges, so combined with the small selection of ideas I have this shouldn’t be a problem. One thing that I obviously can’t take care of the whole time though is...

Judging: Judges would not be allowed to enter the contest. I think it would be nice if we could rotate through judges. Not necessarily in a cyclical manner either, with a specific selection of judges. As long as we have someone volunteer to judge entries by the end of the month, this area should be covered. I understand some of you may have concerns though as to who exactly is judging your hard work. So maybe there should be some limits on who can volunteer? I don’t know. I’m looking for help on this one. As to how many judges work the contest per-month, I figure two should do? I’d be willing to handle this in some way for the first month, but it’s not something I’d be able to carry out consistently.

Prizes: Each winner of the monthly challenge has the option of placing a badge in their signature, courtesy of Scorp himself! With all members entitled to a minimum of two signature images, this shouldn't interfere with most member's existing signatures. Badges include a roman numeral, indicating not WHICH challenge was won, but how MANY challenges were won by an individual. Winners, help yourself to the badges by copying the information out of the code-box below, and placing the image in your signature!

Entry Form: Use this when making post in this topic. All entries must be submitted in this topic using this form, or else are considered invalid.

[b]Story Name:[/b](Pretty straightforward)
[b]Word Count:[/b] (The word count of your story)
[b]Link[/b] (Cause some people have difficulty linking things, you can just paste the URL here if you so wish.)
[b]Rating:[/b] (Normal or Mature.)

Current Challenge – May 2013

Subject: Poison (Any interpretation is valid)Word Count: 1000-8000 (Negotiable, as usual. Until I actually wind up with any real discussion or protest, expect this to be about the norm.)Style: None! Write however you want.Deadline: June 30st

Post any questions or complaints you have in this topic, I’ll get to them as quickly as possible. Suggestions for future challenges can be PM’d to me. Suggestions or volunteering with regards to judging and prizes are can be posted here.

I think that just about covers it. Let’s see how this baby goes...

Have fun writing!

(We could really use a banner too by the way. And maybe a catchier name than the SSLF Monthly Writing Challenge. Also Scorp approved. Also I probably don't know what I'm doing but as long as it's fun right?)