Narcissists on the other hand, are interesting in the sense that they already tell themselves everyone loves them, they’re the best thing since sliced bread, and everything they do is like the first time something really useful was invented for human kind.

Like the lightbulb.

Or condoms.

They also obsess over being the best…which in turn, often makes them push themselves to be the best.

There are narcissist that are really just insecure people masquerading as narcissist (like Trump), I think, but that’s another story for another time.

Take business for instance. Remember the good old days where you just swung by a company, maybe sweet talked the receptionist into getting you a spot to see the boss, or walked in regularly and asked to see the person in charge because you saw an ad in the paper?

You put in your CV/resumé, you either got seen the next day, or same day, had an informal chat, and before you knew it you were hired?

There were no 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, interviews plus one drink-the-blood-of-a-goat final 5th ritual interview, just because they needed to cross-examine to make sure they were convinced enough to hire you.

There was no portfolio you had to present, no vague requests to “prove a track record of success” without actually specifying exactly what they’re looking for.

A guy looked at your CV, had a chat with you to see if what was on your CV wasn’t bullshit, and went with his gut.

This amazingly managed to do just as good of a job as what recruiters are “trained” to do (but fail ever so miserably at) when it comes to ensuring people were hired based off of their talent or skills they could bring to a company, rather than nepotism or particularism.

Remember when you could just walk up to someone, apologize for interrupting, and compliment them on something you really liked about them physically?

Or maybe you’d just be in the bookstore and strike up a conversation about a book you see someone considering buying and you’ve bought it before so hey great, conversation starter.

There’d either be a positive or negative reaction, you’d maybe swap numbers (home numbers, no mobile phones then), eventually go on dates, etc.

Once you were in the relationship, texting day-to-day wasn’t necessary nor was it possible.

The person just trusted that you liked them and them only, and when you both did call to meet up again, you valued it more.

You never really had to convince one another you were into each other, because each time you both met it was like meeting each other all over again – all due to a build up of the feeling of missing one another and looking forward to seeing each other.

Friendships are the same way. I could go on and on and on but I think you’re smart enough to draw up your own examples.

I’m very much action oriented…so maybe this irritates me more than others.

But frankly, I don’t believe in people’s words.

Ironic, right?

A writer, who writes, and writes, and writes – but doesn’t believe other people’s words.

Well, maybe it’s a little more nuanced than that.

I believe people’s words, but I watch their actions.

I don’t believe in proving, don’t believe in convincing, and don’t seek approval.

I’ll take someone’s word, trust and expect them to do the action, and leave them to it.

If they don’t I don’t really care, because I don’t attach much weight to their words first time around.

I do believe that actions speak a lot louder than words, when carried out.

Largely because of the fact that as the desire from people, of people to prove themselves, to convince other people that they are what they are, can do what they can do, feel how they feel, and need what they need, increases…it only perpetuates the issue of words becoming devoid, meaningless – lip service.

Now heat everything over a medium heat until you’ve got your water just below boiling, making sure you stir everything well in order to make sure the sugar dissolves completely (this is important, dammit).

Take your saucepan off the heat, and let your syrup cool until it’s room temperature.

Grab a mason jar (it’s really important that it’s a mason jar), pour the syrup in there, seal it, and (gently) toss it in the fridge.

You’ve gotta have some patience here.

Let it sit in your fridge for a week, then strain out the peppercorns, cloves, and cinnamon sticks.

Take another mason jar (a clean one), pour the syrup in it, seal it, and pop it back in the fridge.

Or, you know, use it, for the above cocktail recipe.

Spiked Hot Chocolate

I’m a fan of coffee and hot chocolate – not really a tea drinker (partly because I suck at making tea – except for spice tea I do a pretty bang up job of making that)…but hot chocolate is one of my all time favourites.

Considering most franchise coffee shops can’t make a good cup of espresso to save their lives (there are few, and they are legends), it’s what I opt for when I’m being asked to sit at a coffee shop and socialise with other people I’ve known for a while…or new ones.

But generally, it’s not socially acceptable to slip the barista some alcohol and ask him to spike your drink.

Nor is it acceptable to spike your own drink, apparently – otherwise that mother with her child wouldn’t be giving me the stink eye whenever I whip out a flask.

When you’re at home though, everything’s fair game.

Wanna act like you’re the only one in line? Go for it.

Spike your hot chocolate? Be my guest.

Walk around naked? Go wild.

You get the idea.

Here’s how to do it (the spiking – not the nudity) properly.

You’ll need:

A decent hot chocolate.

8 oz. of it.

1 oz. Frangelico Hazelnut Liqueur

1/2 oz. Nux Alpina Walnut Liqueur

A Dollop of Freshly Whipped Cream (do it right – none of this pre-whipped business)

Mint Leaves (fresh, for garnish)

Make your hot chocolate – whichever one is your favourite, but just make sure it’s quality.

Add in your hazelnut and walnut liqueur and stir everything together well – use your bar spoon for this.

Top it off with that freshly whipped cream you slaved over making, and garnish with some mint leaves (let’s say, about a sprig).

Done.

There’s a reason for using walnut and hazelnut liqueurs…they add depth to the cocoa base.

This is perfect for when you’re sitting by the fire with your hot toddy – aka that special someone.

Speaking of – I promised you a story with a little insight into me, didn’t I?

Due to my disdain for being predictable, I thought I’d switch things up a bit, and give you a different kind of top 3 list to fill your weekend with. So we’re hitting it low key, meaning you guys get to see some things I prefer to do whenever I feel like keeping my wallet nice and fat.

So here’s 3 things to do that are all under $100. Enjoy.

Bonfire Fridays – Okay, so how many of you like the beach? Alright…how about beer? S’mores? Great. Now that I’ve got your attention – Bonfires are a great way to kick off the weekend – and the best part is – they’re a (relatively) free activity.

True story.

Beaches often facilitate bonfires by providing fire pits. Just keep in mind, these are usually on a first come first serve basis, but if you do get a chance to stake claim to one, you’re in for a fun night with many of your closest friends and acquaintances alike.
Don’t live near a beach? Well, you could always build your own backyard fire pit, and do it for damn cheap too. I’m talking $28, with minimal shopping around. This is probably your better option, because really, when it comes to safety standards and regulations, all you really have to concern yourself with is making sure you don’t build it near anything that can catch fire.

Like…trees, for instance.

Meaning you can focus on the more important things….like where you’re gonna put those 5 kegs you ordered and if you have enough mixers and liquor stocked in the mini bar. Which makes me think of another benefit – no drunk driving. Safety first, kids.

Sugar Rush Saturdays – It was Saturday afternoon. Not being able to see each other all week due to our busy schedules, my (ex)girlfriend drove up to my place to spend the day. “I’ve got a surprise for you.” I say to her over the phone. “A surprise? What is it? Tell me!” she replies back, I can hear the curiosity in her voice now. “Negative, no can do. You’re gonna have to wait until you get here. All I can say is this – take cover.” I respond, eyeing the two items I purchased sitting in the corner of my living room. “Take cover?” she asks, “Yes…take cover“.

This one is for the kid in all of us. So you had the bonfire on Friday night, now besides empty liquor bottles and snacks cleaned out from your pantry, you’re wondering what to do with the 3 extra bags of marshmallows you have leftover from making S’mores.
Well, you are in for a treat my friend. Whenever I find myself in this position, a slow, sly grin spreads across my face with one eyebrow raised. I can feel my inner 10 year old self welling up with excitement and adrenaline at the mere thought of it…and “it” is not Rice Krispie treats.
I’m talking about taking those white puffs of sugar, and stuffing them into an air pressure fueled blaster. To put it simply, Call of Duty and Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory‘s illegitimate love child.

Pretty sure the 10 year old version of Tony Montana would’ve been jealous of this.

These things can shoot mini marshmallows over a good 30 feet into the air, and hold up to or over 20 rounds of “ammo.” The coolest thing about it? It’s something that can be done indoors or out. So you can say “Take that” to days when it’s overcast and rainy and you don’t feel like going anywhere. The best part about the whole activity? The reload time. Try it out for yourself and you’ll know exactly what I mean.

It’s Sunday? Go Fly a Kite – and no, I’m not telling you to bugger off. When you’ve got breezy Sundays and perfect weather, this novelty activity is the perfect thing to add to an already great day. Though it may take some skill, once you’re up and running kite flying can be quite fun.
I remember my days of living in Bermuda, Good Friday was probably the most interesting and entertaining holiday I’d ever encountered at the time…and honestly? I still fly kites today.

There are actually businesses that run off this classic past-time, like the popular Skyward Kites in Bal Harbor. They have their business located and set up where you can buy and fly your kites all at one time, meaning no waiting around to start the fun.
The great thing about this activity is it’s reasonably priced, and a pretty flexible past time where you can bring friends, family, a date (to show your more relaxed, simple, fun loving side), or just yourself and spend a Sunday morning in a zen like state.

And there you have it. When you feel like keeping some cash in the bank or just want to get back to enjoying the simpler things in life, all of these activities can get you going in the right direction.