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Help! I've fallen and can’t get up!

If you want to get rich on the lot today just listen to a few “consultants” that consider themselves “gurus.” Like millions of Americans did when Tom Vu told them how to make real estate millions in his free seminar that was used to sell the more expensive seminar. We have a lot of Tom Vu's in the car business today and while they’re not as entertaining (and don’t go everywhere with 5 gorgeous women in bikinis) they’re professionals at taking dealers’ money. “Do you think these girls like me? No! They like my money.” – Tom Vu

I'm going to sign up for thirty conferences over the next twelve months so I can take notes on how to talk well in front of groups and convince people I am an authority on something that is actually meaningless. I LOVE seeing all the pictures of the same bust-outs sitting at the same tables taking notes on the same things… It almost reminds me of college except the courses were different and were taught by real experts. None of the people that present at the automotive conferences, barring a select few, have any real dealership experience or any academic qualifications. I check LinkedIn constantly and am amazed at what 3 months at two different dealerships can produce by way of “experts.” So, I’m going to take my years of dealership experience along with my academic credentials show them all up. Get ready for the realness! “There’s an old American saying. It’s called, ‘Get off your butt and do it!’” – Tom Vu

I always laugh when I see the same piece of content on 10 different sites promoting the next workshop where "professionals" are going to give you all this great actionable content. The last "workshop" I went to was nothing more than a pitch fest, where nothing was shared except a bunch of worthless noise with handouts of how to contact the pitchers. “You can be successful like me” –Tom Vu

There is some decent content shared at these events but it's all about the Benjamin’s, to think any differently would be delusional. Why would companies or consultants spend the money to be there and provide the content? Nobody is going to give away their intellectual property for free… Are they? If it’s so valuable, why would they? I really respect and enjoy select events and that’s a fact however there are others that are quite literally a never-ending pitch focused on self-promotion and that’s it; nothing less and nothing more. Those are the ones that are a total waste of time and money. “Take the greatest vitamin in the world!” – Don Lapre

I know all of these people by name and every time I see reference to one of them I think of the car people I can associate with each one. I won't publicly draw any inferences because if you’ve been in this space long enough you can do it for yourself. “The Making Money Show” – Don Lapre

Great salespeople are everywhere. We’re an industry that wants great salespeople everywhere. I want to make millions and if following the lead of others will help me do it then I am all in. I want to do things that will make me rich beyond my wildest dreams and I dream big! If you sell a couple cars from it and experience negative ROI, it's your fault not mine; I did what you paid me to do… Right?

Chris Vitale is Vice President of Sales at iMagicLab. He has over 15 years of in dealership experience and is quick to call it like he sees it. If you want a no holds barred look into ​effective CRM deployment and use subscribe to our blog here at DrivingSales and follow Chris @thecrmgod on Twitter.​

P.S. If you can't see the humor here you need watch the videos below on YouTube and then Google their respective answers to the various government agencies that clamped down on their shenanigans!