Do You Believe in Soulmates? FYI: It May Be Hurting Your Relationship

When you're looking for love, it seems like the ultimate goal is to find someone who seems made especially for you. You two complete each other. You're soulmates. Turns out, thinking about love as a perfect union rather than a shared journey can damage your relationship, according to a new study in Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.

With baseball season in full swing and the World Cup kicking off, there's no better time to up the sports-watching ante with a sexy bet. "Make oral-sex wagers with your man while he's watching sports," says sex therapist Vanessa Marin. "It's a really playful and fun way to bring more intimacy into your relationship," she says. Note: We're rooting for you on this one!

Researchers had people in long-term relationships take a quiz that determined whether their mind-sets aligned more with unity or journey. Then the participants recalled celebrations and conflicts with their partners and evaluated how happy they were as a couple. Those who thought of their relationships as perfect unions were less satisfied after remembering disagreements, but those who looked at their relationships as journeys weren't. It makes sense; if you think you two are soulmates, fighting may shake that belief. If you just see arguments as a stepping stone in your journey together, you're more inclined to believe they're a part of your evolution as a couple. If you're very committed to the idea of soulmates, it can't hurt to think of the person as your perfect match but the relationship as a journey.

The concept of soulmates simultaneously reassures and terrifies me. On frustrating single nights, it's nice to think there's someone out there who's guaranteed to be your match. On the other hand, how are you supposed to find one person in a world of 7 billion?! I'm of the opinion that we all have many potential loves roaming around out there, which is a nice mix of the two.

What do you think about soulmates? Is there one person out there for you, or is life a little more random than that?