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On Writer’s Block & Letting Go

Writer’s block hits everyone every now and then. It’s even hit me in the past and lately, it’s happening again. With living a new life in Austin, working hard at my new job, now trying to find my own apartment and just the daily things that go on; blogging can sometimes end up taking a backseat. If something you love doing starts to become a chore, then you’re not that into it anymore. It’s just not as exciting.

I was that blogger who felt I needed to blog at least 3 to 4 times a week to keep the blog going, but now I’m happy with at least posting once a week. I love reading everyone’s blogs, but when I see a blogger that posts 4 or 5 times a week, it’s extremely hard to keep up. Which is weird because back in the day I was able to keep up with every single post on their blog. Life sometimes takes you in a different direction and I guess I’m adjusting to that new flow.

Sometimes I do want to blog about certain things happening in my life, but then I hold back because it may not seem like the right time to share it. It’s almost like you don’t want to jinx yourself to prevent from jumping ahead of yourself. I figure I’ll just save those topics for my newsletter subscribers.

Food for thought

What I do want to share on my blog today though is an observation that I think will be a nice nugget or food for thought for y’all to think about. So if you agree or disagree, definitely let me know in the comments.

Would you agree that you are what you eat? In the same way, would you agree that you are what you talk about? Or the company that you keep? I think all of those things affect you whether it be consciously or unconsciously. Let’s get into what happens when you constantly keep talking about something/someone, you inevitably become what you speak of. One example I can think of is letting go of someone or a relationship.

Letting go. I’ve had to do it myself many times and the times I didn’t let go, is the times I kept dwelling on a situation or kept talking about someone whether it was good or bad. But once I made a conscious effort to stop talking about it, letting it take space in my brain, letting it consume my emotions and completely went cold turkey, that’s when things started to change for me, for the better.

Sometimes online I see friends share about heartbreak or a guy they’re really into with all kinds of poems and memes. While some of those posts are funny or engaging, it leaves me with the impression that that person is not letting go of what they’re ranting about. It becomes obvious when it’s been a year and they’re still talking about the same thing. I find myself wanting to hide their posts because this person is not growing, even though they claim to be. They’re seriously in denial.

What’s funny is that I was that girl too. When I had my dating blog, Dateless in Dallas, I kept writing posts that were so angry towards men and I’m sure it turned a lot of people off because it wasn’t pretty. Once I realized what I was putting out there on the internet wasn’t working in my favor, I changed my blog’s name and wanted to only share positive things. When I did that I was able to finally be in a relationship because I wasn’t constantly focused on what was going wrong.

Girl On The Train

Another perfect example is that movie Girl On The Train. If you haven’t seen it, you must. The main character, Rachel (Emily Blunt), was focused on her past by stalking what was going on in her old neighborhood where her ex-husband lives with his new woman he left her for. Let me tell you, nothing good came from her focusing on her old life. It got her in a whole lot of trouble and it destroyed her life.

So with that said, don’t be like Rachel where you’re so focused on your past that you lose sight of what’s in front of you; the present. If Rachel would’ve just not taken the train, or paid attention to what was going on in people’s backyards, she would’ve already been remarried with kids by now. But sometimes people need to get lost on their detour before they’re truly ready to get back on the road.

Let it go and let God

I’m finally back on the road and it took me a long ass time to get here. When I see people struggling, I’ll say something to encourage them to get back on the road, but it’s ultimately up to them. You can bring the horse to water, but you can’t make the horse drink, am I right?

When people would call me out on my bullshit, I’d get defensive and tune them out. Now, I’ve learned that sometimes what people say may have some weight because they’re on the outside looking in and they can have a whole new perspective than what I can see. So if someone brings something to your attention, don’t be so quick to dismiss it or think they’re out to get you. People who care about you will say something, those who don’t will just stay silent and then talk to someone about you behind your back.

I know it’s easier said than done. And while sometimes ignorance is bliss, when the truth is spoken however, it hurts. But I think it’s the good kind of hurt that will help you to grow and move you forward. I think it’s always a struggle where you try not to dwell, keep getting back on your path and control your thoughts to move on.

I’m always going to be on high alert to not let things fester and keep it moving. Accept that it happened, allow yourself to feel whatever emotion and then refocus back on your goals/journey. Everything will come in ways you didn’t expect so just believe in the process, but definitely the first step is to LET IT GO. Let it go and let God. Let him rebuild you from the ground up where you were broken and you will become a new you.

But to keep talking, sharing memes about something/someone that hurt you, you’re just not giving yourself a chance to breathe, to heal, to move forward. It’s just not healthy. I know this because I’ve been through it.

Why do you think Taylor Swift is still single? Because homegirl won’t let go. She keeps singing the same song over and over. I tune her out now with no fucks to give. Honestly, I think she gets around too much. I don’t like her at all LOL.

I love this quote I found –

To heal a wound you need to stop touching it.

Boom! That right there couldn’t be further from the truth. I’ll just end this post by dropping the mic and I’ll catch you guys later.

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I’ve been off the blogosphere for quite some time now and it’s refreshing to get back into it after a break… still no guilt in abandoning my blog for months 😛

I completely agree with you on letting go. I’ve had my tough shares of letting go and I think time eventually helps as well, or at least, for me. Sometimes you don’t even realized you’ve let go until you reflect back and that moment when you realized a weight has lifted from your shoulders is such a great feeling!

Yeah it’s one of those things where you shouldn’t feel guilty to take a break, but sometimes you feel guilty. I know I struggle with that sometimes.

I agree, time is the best healer of all wounds. Everyone moves at their own pace and I know I’ve been there where I don’t move forward and dwell and/or worry about things I can’t control. Sometimes we need to close that chapter though, instead of re-reading it you know? I agree, a weight can be lifted off your shoulders when you weren’t aware you were even carrying anything.

Hope you have an amazing week hun! Cheers to moving forward and onward.

I’ve been off the blogging world for a while to girl! It’s like bittersweet. Everything is so different, even reading some of my “favourite” blogs are not inspiring for me to write anymore. It’s always the same content, nothing is raw and personal anymore. I guess thats why I gravitate towards your blog! And, after reading your email you sent couple of days ago, I know you’re taking time in your personal life, and I’m super happy about that! Sometimes living in the now is the best way to get inspired, and I know you’ll be back whenever you’re ready 🙂

Thanks Nessa! Yeah I know exactly what you mean because my favorite blogs have changed a lot and it’s definitely not the diary style they used to be. They all seem to have an agenda and it’s no longer genuine. I’m glad you still gravitate towards my blog! I love your blog too because you keep it real and still write from your heart. Yeah I feel like I’m now gonna be able to blog more regularly so stay tuned 🙂 I’m writing a post right now as I type this!

Hope you had a fabulous Labor Day weekend!

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Hola! I’m Bella, lifestyle blogger who’s passionate, creative, influential and positive little Latina. I’m 5’2″ with a fun & witty personality. You be the judge, but don’t take it too seriously. Click on Start Here! to learn more about me.