Although there were some revelations in last night's episode, and Lorena's emerald 1903s dress was gorgeous, I was left wondering: why does Sookie always need to be rescued?

And here's a question: If Godric is such an old and powerful vampire, how is the Fellowship of the Sun keeping him captive? Why doesn't he just slay mothertruckers left and right? Maybe he wants to die? And why would he give a crap about Gabe raping Sookie, since he's a Death monster and doesn't even know Sookie (clip above)?

Anyway. Among the things we witnessed, overheard and learned:

Sam, who usually turns into a dog, turned into an owl when being chased by Beasty Maryann.

Hoyt is a 28-year-old virgin.

Jessica's way of dealing with Hoyt's virginity: "Just take off your pants."

Eric cried blood tears over Godric. Romantic!

In a fight between Jason Stackhouse and Gabe the burly bodyguard, Jason wins.

Tara to Arlene: "Are you telling me you date-raped Terry Bellefleur?"

At least we finally saw Godric, the vamp who made Eric a vamp, and who will hopefully inject some much-needed life into this draggy season.