The basis of my research is my experience as a nurse and former teacher
in palliative care, and my scientific work is based on Research-Training
(1), which follows a rigorous, experiential methodology. I have noticed
how much damage is caused by hiding death from children, affecting their
overall health, sometimes until the end of their lives.

Children encounter death any time from birth onwards, and later they
will hear, among other subjects, of euthanasia and palliative care, which
has only recently become a subject for the media. However, even if considerable
efforts have been made in hospitals, what is missing is the aspect ‘before
death’, which means taking action before emotional difficulties arise,
especially as talking about many things opens up other subjects, and helps
to develop a global view of life in general. The thing is that when a child
starts asking about death because he has been bereaved or the subject has
come up at school, teachers (in the majority of cases) do not always know
how to reply or deal with the child’s needs. To carry out my field-study,
I set up twelve groups in ‘Existential Research-Training’ on the subject
of death, with children aged between six and twelve.

An outline of Existential Research-Training.

I suggested setting up an Existential Research-Training group to attempt
to solve the problem of death in schools; on another occasion I was specifically
asked to come in after a child had died. Eventually we had twelve groups
running, both in Paris and in the Yonne Département. The educational
aim, working as a team, was to arrange weekly children’s sharing groups
on the topic of death, with children who had not yet encountered such emotional
difficulties, so that they would be better prepared to face life.

The results.

The results showed up in the attitude of the school teachers, since
they set about training themselves to respond to children’s needs for teaching
on death, which confirmed my initial hypotheses, namely that educating
people about death in a way that gives greater meaning to life can be included
in the school curriculum: both children and adults found ways to resolve
the issue of how to face death.
On the whole, the children aged six and seven got into the subject
quite naturally. They had been wondering about many aspects of death and
life, since by nature they are very inquisitive. What they shared particularly
about was that they had received little information about death from adults,
the contrast between the reality of death and the usual image of death
in TV and films, and their need to talk about what happens after death.
As for the older children (between eight and twelve), although they
attended the group meetings ? and there was no obligation to do so ? they
were torn between what they hear around them, such as “You mustn’t talk
about death, you’re too young”, and what they actually feel. In practical
activities like painting, do-it-yourself and drawing, the children’s creativity
led to many interesting revelations, because they felt free to express
how they felt about taboo subjects such as suffering, violence and crime.
The extent of the children’s interest shows up in the very nature of
the questions they ask, and in the way they take up the challenge of confronting
and understanding death. After my sessions with them, it was noticeable
that the children not only were able to talk openly about death while getting
their bearings on it and grasping its existential meaning, but displayed
even more aliveness afterwards. In addition, the children who became more
comfortable with death showed greater respect for life and living things,
which is useful when it comes to basic health measures and a philosophy
for living. Apart from these changes, this research has triggered discussion
outside the school, as well as having an effect on other professionals
involved in children’s education and healthcare.

Conclusion.

In order to reinstate death in our societies it is important for death
to be approached from an educational angle, and as soon as children start
wondering about life and death. Thanks to these groups, they were able
to talk spontaneously about death at school with their usual teachers and
in their families, which will enable us all, in time, to change the way
we see death in Western societies.