Saturday, November 18, 2006

Christmas Is Nearly Here...Again!!!

So why not treat your family, friends and most vivid enemies with some of these Christmas ideas on sale for this one of your Christmases?

White Pot and Black Kettle SetNow your pot can call your kettle black in the complete absence of irony and with zero hypocrisy.

LasersThree lasers of equal strength in a leather gift box with complementary 'Guide to Lasers' handbook.

TreasureA massive chest of treasure featuring jewels, crowns and gold coins, with authentic iron hinges and locks, made of authentically aged oak, expertly treated with sea-water, sand and parrot droppings. For the poor sailor in the family.

KFC Christmas Tree

Ever tire of the same old stale chocolate borbles wrapped in silver foil hanging from the branches of your Christmas tree? Every single decoration on this tree is a sparkling foil gift containing the choicest cuts of fried chicken made the way only The Colonel and his closest friends know how. And how.

Bargain Laser Set

Just two lasers presented in a leather-effect pouch, with complementary slip.

A Ship's BellIn hand-polished brass with your own personalised engraving, mounted in a glass and mahogany case adorned with maritime-themed filigree. Ideal for the wealthier ex-sailor or ship's bell enthusiast.

Let's not forget the eye repair kits which were so popular last year. Apparently you can buy them for pets now.

Incidentally, do you recall when KFC first trialed those trees, and they all had to be recalled? It seemed a little crazy that gravy had been deemed a viable decoration, especially when it was so scauldingly hot. And you know how instinctive it is for kids to want to touch the gravy.