Afraid of losing another test match, Indian team offers to attend Rajya Sabha on Sachin’s behalf

England: In a move seen as being inspired by the fear of losing another test match on foreign soil, Mahendra Singh Dhoni – India’s captain – has announced that the Indian cricket team will forfeit the last test match and instead, attend Rajya Sabha on Sachin Tendulkar’s behalf. Faced with public/news channel pressure, Sachin had only recently applied for a leave of absence from the Rajya Sabha after revealing that his brother’s ill health had rendered him unable to attend RS, prior to his leave application.

“We are a team,” Dhoni said at a press conference. “Even when someone retires, he still remains a part of the team and being team players, we must support the person. So we have decided to forfeit the last test match and attend Rajya Sabha on Sachin bhai’s behalf. That way, we won’t have to lose another test match and Arnab Goswami will get enough cricketers in the Parliament so that he doesn’t have to ask any more ‘Nation wants to know’ questions again.”