The Ego as the Root of Conflict

Most people think of the ego as something they value, their individual separate uniqueness, and they cannot distinguish it from their real being. The idea of “getting rid of” or “working on” the ego seems foreign to them. They ask, “Is there any advantage in transcending the ego? How can it be beneficial to constantly look at my motives, my inner thoughts, the subtle undercurrents of my self-centeredness generated by my ego? What is the advantage of being egoless? Can I really gain anything by giving up looking out for Number One? Look around. How many people really want to give up their egos? I’ll be stupid if I do. I want to develop the strength of my ego, not reduce it.”

But what is ego really? It is the sense of “I” sitting inside our own idea of who we are. It is the shell which contains that consciousness which is in everything. The seed or nut of consciousness must express through growing into some form or body. In getting a body this seed of our being wants to be somebody unique and special, separate from other bodies and from the environment, “That’s me,” it says, until the ego, the “self-sense”, realizes that by giving up its narrow idea of separateness, it gains a much greater sense of individuality and fulfillment and a much expanded consciousness. By giving up our separateness, we must give up our selfishness, that part that harms others, knowingly or unknowingly. Rather than being a weak, unattractive and spineless state, egolessness is knowing who you really are. It is becoming one with everyone and feeling that the whole environment belongs to you. Supreme selflessness builds tremendous strength, joy and courage. But it terrifies every bit of egotism left inside us.

Creative Conflict challenges every person to confront his or her ego position that separates being from being, because it is ego –revealing. It tackles the very causes that separate human consciousness from total oneness. The essentially spiritual structure of the technique we call Creative Conflict has nothing to do with religion or any belief system, but is just the pure relationship between energies. You can refer to my earlier book Nuclear Evolution for more explanation of the nature of these personal energies, and the link between ego, light and consciousness. Given these facts of nature, it seems a bit absurd that so few people are really willing to work on their ego—that self-centered identity which binds and limits their real potential and personal energy. Most people would rather cling to the ego as a self-identity or escape into some heavenly euphoria or into sense pleasures. But in working directly with the confrontation of our ego we release the energies that block our fulfillment. We release them permanently into a greater potential, transport our consciousness into greater light and expanded understanding.

The first step in dissolving the separating self-sense of ego is to get out of our little self and inside the inner worlds of others. All the new beginning personal growth methods available are good (such as Gestalt, psychosynthesis, EST, co-counseling, PET, etc.) for they enable us to begin to take this step. But we must then go much farther to develop our own evolution and to deepen relationships by learning to watch and confront the ego’s subtle unconscious motivations and reactions. There are many, many group process methods available today. Most fall under some branch of humanistic psychology or therapy. Some are short-term intensives. They do enhance awareness of self and others’ inner worlds to varying in degress, but few have the basic purpose of penetrating the ego, which is the crux of human destiny on earth.

One of the proofs of this statement is that if you put the skilled facilitators of the majority of these groups together, most often underneath the veneer of a degree of cooperation, you will find competitive, even self-righteous egos vying for recognition, esteem and one-upmanship or egos unable to really receive the full being of the other. And this is because they do not yet know how to work on the basics—their own egos. As leaders they do not yet see their own underlying motivations. I am not saying that all group leaders are like this, but too many are!

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Dr.MarkSircusAC., OMD, DM (P)

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