Teaching Children and Coaching Parents – making the next generation the best one yet!

Ask yourself, does it matter, next time you feel like making a negative remark on anything or at someone. Now let me explain…. with this example:

A man comes home from work tired, he sits down at the table and the food that has been prepared by his wife is not as good as the man was hoping it would be, so he decides to tell his wife just that. The wife had a pretty hard day as well and is also tired and she answers him right back and tells her husband that maybe the food would be better if she had a bigger budget for shopping. Then he answers her back and tells her that she is not resourceful enough. She then says to the husband that maybe she could be more resourceful if she had new kitchen appliances like all her friends, but her husband does not provide enough for that and so on and so on. Then they start to reach out for per-marriage promises they feel like they have been cheated out off, and they start to talk about how this life is not what they signed up for and so forth. They argue until they can’t argue any more. The food still tastes the same and now it’s cold as well!

What did they get out off all that arguing?
They found more weak spots on each other to use next time, they added more powerful ammunition to their arsenal for the next fight and that is the only thing they have accomplished here.

What about if he would have asked his wife how her day was, before he decided to make negative comments on her cooking? What about if he would have felt gratitude to have a dinner table to sit at? What about gratitude to have a wife, or a wife that found time and energy to even try? What about if he would have asked himself this question before commenting, does it matter?

Does it matter in regards to my goals?Does it matter so much that I will finally accomplish my dreams with the comment I am about to make? Really, does it matter?

Does it matter for my life’s goals if someone does not clean up after themselves?Does it matter if someone spills milk?Does it matter if your wife forgets to iron your shirt when she has promised to do so?Does it matter if your husband forgets to offer you a cup of coffee when he makes one for himself?

If it does not matter for your grand design of life, then don’t.
You can easily cut down arguing with other people about 70-95% just by asking yourself first, DOES IT MATTER?

The amount of free playtime for children is steadily diminishing. Around 40% of the day was free playtime according to a scientific research done around the year 1980 in the USA, and in the 90’s it was down to 20% and probably even less today than that. We as parents really want our children to thrive and part of our attempts to achieve that, is to schedule and structure our children’s time to things that we consider good for them and educational.

Do you schedule time for you child to do things that are not scheduled? Yes, I know this sentence is weird but what I mean is, do you keep anytime on your children’s schedule available to just play?

When a child plays without an adult supervision or structure, it learns more with free playtime than the other way around. If your child is not used to being able to explore and choose to dig a hole for no parents reason at all, for example, you might see confusion from your child at first when you allow your child to engage in free playtime. If you want to join your child in the free playtime, just be sure to let your child lead and if your child is, at any point, confused and does not know what to do next, just wait. Worst case scenario make subtle suggestions like, “why don’t you go outside now”, and the more unspecific you can be the quicker you will notice the creativity in you child start to bloom.

The more structured the playtime is the more the child will learn what we want them to learn, but nevertheless they will learn much less. The more they control the free playtime the more they will learn and the more their creativity is being nurtured.

We are all born with great creativity and free playtime is one of the great ways to let that creativity shine and thrive.

Well there is nothing called too much love, but on the other hand many parents fall into the trap of putting there children on a pedestal and over protect them. We all know that it is done out of love, but what are the consistences? We should love our children but at the same time we should not worship them. Parents should be preparing their children for the road ahead, but not be preparing the road by adjusting it so to speak. If we don’t let our children face any adversity we take a great lesson in life away from them by over protectingthem. You might be faced with a child that gets frustrated over something, then it would be wise to teach the child the proper technique to solve the problem at hand if possible. Example, frustration over Lego’s or something that can be solved with calm attitude and by using their mind to complete the task. This is relevant even for very young babies with simple tasks like this Fisher Price toy (see picture). It can be good to wait a bit and see if your child can figure out the solution through the frustration by itself or if you need to step in and calmly show them how. The easy thing to do, is to pick the child up and comfort it, that does not mean you love the child more nor less. Everyone needs some adversity to grow and mature.

One of the hardest thing a parent hears is criticism about their child, but if you have an open mind about it and try to see the positive side of that criticism that might play a big part in the child’s growth and correcting the problem if it truly is a problem. We as parents all know, even sometimes we have a hard time admitting it, that our children behave totally different at home than in other places like school for example. When our children are very young many of us don’t want to say anything negative to our child, which is fine, but positive criticism is very good in my opinion. For example, I was teaching my child her first tune on the piano. It was a very simple tune with only four notes to play and she would play it for me and wait for me to clapp. If she did the song with one note missing I said to her, wow that’s was almost perfect. Then she would try again and when she got it perfect I would then applaud her performance. When she got it with one hand on the four notes using each finger to play each note and got it perfect I would applaud her and then challenge her even more and now ask her to play with the other hand using all the fingers (not one finger like some of us learned first, including me). When writing this we are working on playing the four note tune with both hands simultaneously (she is 5 years old when this is written). I see that I could have started to show her how to play at least one year ago. While I teach her new skills in life today I always try to look at her as her own person, not an extension of me. I am not gonna look at her as my second chance of being something I was not, making this all be about me. I show her different things to do, lead by example and see what she likes and what challenges her. I love to watch her grow and I know she can be whatever she wants to be and it’s my job to help her realize that.

Is you child your BFF? Think about this, we do not parent our grown BFF’s, so how are we going to do the necessary parenting if our children are our BFF’s? I think we as parents want to be BFF with our children but we might want to wait until they are in their teens before it is wise to do so, the reason is that if we are BFF’s we become softer as parents and we might skip some of the things we really need to do but don’t wanna do. Yes parenting is not always 100% joy, but all the efforts of preparing our children for the road ahead is totally worth it. There are no short cuts unless you want to wait for the consistences a few years from now, I did that with my first born, do not recommend it. It is so much easier to discipline or correct your children when they are young and sometimes it’s too late if we are going to wait until they are 10 years old or even later than that.

Is your child gonna be a bully or be bullied? Nether is necessary true. I believe we need to keep an eye on our children at an early age how they interact with others and it is our job to prepare them for the adversity they will face when they are not at home under our protection. Many of us parents are afraid that our children will be left behind and we prepare our children to excel at sports for example. Sometimes we go so far to teach the children that they have to do whatever it takes to win, to be number one. What does that mean? Are we teaching our children to be willing to throw the other kids under a buss just to win the race, meaning willing to bully others? There is a fine line we can cross when teaching our children to succeed in sports for example, but true in many other situations as well. If we are focusing on our own fears that our child might be left behind we might be caught in a trap of training the next bully. In my opinion competing and winning is very good if that’s what you are teaching your children, but at the same time to play sportsmanlike, whether on the field or at the playground is also a key ingredient and to teach our children how to loose as well. We can teach them how to learn from the experience and grow from it, not focusing on the anger or frustration but the value of that lesson, how we can together become a better person from that loss.

What are your intentions for your child? To you have big dreams planned for your child? I think most of us parents wish something magical for our children and some start to push their children into something too early in my opinion. I believe a child needs to be a child as long as it needs to be, this varies from children. I think many of us know some children that were born with “an old soul”, it never quit seemed like that child ever was a child, but those are the exceptions. Most children need to play and have fun and come up with different things to do, we parents must sometimes correct the things they come up with, hehehe. Childhood and being able to go into imaginary games and play with friends is a great way to challenge the brain, their creativity and playfulness. One of the highest frequencies we can be at, is when we feel joy and we often see that in our children when they play, many adults forget this valuable trade in life to play and be joyful. It is a wonderful feeling to play and have fun and it impacts people around us when we have this radiant energy flowing from us. I do not want to take that away from my children even though I am teaching them valuable life lessons in between. How are we as parents teaching our children? Are we telling them to be this or that, and telling them how they should act and trying to be intelligent about it? But what are we teaching our children when it comes to how we behave and react to situations in life? I believe that whatever we teach our children we must become as well, if we are not already doing that ourselves. If you want your child to be an awesome person, then you need to be an awesome person. Our children learn the most from the energy vibration we are sending out and by the way we act and do things.

Children are motivated by short term gratification, but we as parents are always looking ahead. What will matter in 15 years from now? I believe it is the personality our children develop, how they treat others and what they think about themselves. In my opinion if we raise a child be limitless, meaning that the child is never allowed to use words like can’t, don’t, won’t, and no, when discussing something they want to be or do. Then the child will never wonder if I can do something but rather concentrate on the how and when. All the small things we teach and show our children that manage to become rituals and habits will compound into their future lives.

Simple reminder to all parents, our children do fall and we as parents don’t like to see it, but guess what, it is important for them to be able to fall, in different ways, short term pain for a long term gain. Watching our children learn lessons is not always easy but I embrace it at a part of their path towards becoming a great adult.

Teach your children how to manifest their dreams into their reality.

Take a box of any kind, wood, cardboard, plastic or from any other material, it does not matter. Put a label on the box. On the label write:

“what goes in becomes real”.

Now explain to you child how the box works. They take a picture of something they desire or write it on a piece of paper and place it in the box. We will use an example of a brand new red bike to illustrate this method. Now you child has found a picture of a new red bike in a magazine for example. Then cut out the picture and drop it in the box and close it. Now you will explain to your child that by putting it in the box it will manifest the bike into their reality, their life. Let them think about it overnight and tell them tomorrow you will explain how the magic works.The next day the process will begin to manifest.
The next day start to explain how this box will manifest their dreams. You open the box and look at the picture of the red bike with you child and say that now we need to know how much the bike costs. You will then find the price for the bike, maybe you go into a bike shop and find the bike there and the price tag or maybe you look online and find a price tag for that bike there. Make sure your child participates in the journey the whole time. Once you have a price tag, let’s use an example of $150 to illustrate the method. You write on another piece of paper the price. Now drop that as well into the box.

Now you will explain to your child that we need to think about ways to create that money into our reality. Here are a few examples, just make sure whatever method you choose to use that the child will have to feel like it is contributing as much a possible in the project:

You could bake cookies and sell once a week in your neighborhood. You can go with your child and knock on doors in the neighborhood and tell them that you and your child are selling cookies to manifest money for their dream bike and you will be making rounds with freshly baked cookies and ask them if they would be interested to buy some cookies from the child? Once you have orders then you will go and bake the cookies with your child and let your child participate as much as possible in the baking process and deliveries. Each time you get a payment, you place the money into the box and fix the price tag by subtracting the amount created that day. Example if you made $10 then fix the price tag from $150 to $140 and tell the child how much is left to reach that goal.

Another idea is to pick night-crawlers and sell to a fishing store or directly to anyone who is going fishing. The same thing applies, you will have to take your child on a trip to knock on doors and find someone who wants to purchase some night-crawlers for fishing. This is simply done by watering your lawn and picking them in the dark with flashlights. I used to do that myself as a child and sell to fishing stores.

Another idea is to look for soda cans and sell them. If you can only redeem money in the form of a note that will be used at the grocery store for example, then you will keep that note for yourself and use it for groceries, but you will pay cash of the equal amount to the note to you child so he/she can put the money in the box. You can also go around the neighborhood and find people who do not save their cans and ask them to safe them and your child will collect them each Sunday until the goal is reached.

Another idea would be to create a YouTube channel for your child and start making funny videos or talent videos or anything interesting. You could record you child playing video games, if that is something your son/daughter likes to do and post them online on the YouTube channel and start getting views and advertisement revenue from that. This you will have to supervise of course and if you don’t know how to do that, but are interested to do that, you can easily find tutorials on YouTube that will teach you how to set it up.

Another idea would be to clean the cars in the neighborhood. Same principle applies, you go with your child and ask around who would like to get their car cleaned for a reasonable price.

Another idea would be to offer chores around the house and pay them for it. It could be taking out the garbage each day or doing the dishes, getting the mail, vacuuming or whatever you think will teach them responsibility and the value of getting paid for service rendered.

Regardless of what you decide to do, this will teach your children how to manifest their dreams into their reality. You have to go on this journey with them and yes this will take some effort on your behalf and your child as well. This will be a very valuable lesson in mindset groundwork for your children’s future success.

Have fun with it and you will be spending quality time with your child and seeing how your child grows and you will also notice that by teaching them this, they will appreciate that new red bike so much more than if you would just go out and buy it for them.

This is one of many methods I teach in my new book I am currently writing and scheduled to be published in May 2016.

The power of the mind is beyond what most of us can even imagine. So please do not try and put limits on what you think you can do, because your mind can certainly do that for you if you want.

Stamina is one of the most desirable attributed we seek physically and the more stamina we have the more energy and the more we get done. I have been in sports more than 20 years and been coached by several top coaches around the world. Long distance running was always hard for me but in short sprints I was considered pretty good, my main sport was basketball. In 2016 I beat my personal best times several times over and over again, so I had to set new goals again and again. But why am I able to run faster than ever in my life now?

Here is the secret? I tell my cells to carry more oxygen for me. Really I do.

This here is a 3D model of the inside of an cell that I created many years ago. This helps me to visualize what my red blood cells look like inside my body. The red blood cells carry the oxygen to the body parts all over the body and circulate back to the lungs again to pick up more oxygen (co2).

I started to tell my blood cells when I was about to give up on the treadmill to please carry a little more oxygen (co2) to my body and I tried to make it so it seemed like was not a big deal for them. I would say, just take like 10% more than normal, you can do it, I am putting 10% extra effort into running and I think you can as well with the oxygen (talking inside of my head to my red blood cells).

Here is an image of the red blood cell and another image when the blood cell takes just a little extra oxygen to my body parts.

Normal red blood cell in my body carrying oxygen.

Normal red blood cell in my body carrying just a little extra oxygen for me when I need it.

What I have also told them to do, is to double every tenth cell that circulates after my workout, giving me more red blood cell workers to carry oxygen through my body.

Today I run faster and my heart rate is lower now when I break my own best times then before when I was running distances on times I had done before.

Try it yourself and teach your children how to visualize things they want in their bodies, teach them how to visualize their goals and how to manifest them them into reality. This is one of the many methods to do just that.