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A widely cited 2006 University of Maryland survey shows that web users with “female” names are 25 times more likely to be harassed than users with “male” or ambiguous names.

As feminists go, I have it easy. I’ve only received one explicit death threat. I’ve gotten rape threats, but not many. No one has contacted me at home; I’ve received only one anonymous message warning me that I was being “watched.” Of the people who have called me gendered slurs or lied about me online, only one of them has done the same to my mother.

If this seems strange–being grateful for only a few threats, only minimal harm to my family, only a few dozen people who would like to see me raped or killed – then you’re probably not a feminist blogger.

For years, it’s been an open secret that having a visibly female online identity – especially if one writes about sexism – is a personal security risk. Highly visible bloggers such as Jessica Valenti report receiving hate mail every day. Some have been subject to campaigns aimed at getting them fired. This doesn’t only happen to high-profile feminists, or women; some people, including men, have been harassed at work simply for commenting on the wrong blog. But it is a gendered phenomenon: W.H.O.A. reports that, in 2010, 73% of cyberstalking victims were female.

In recent weeks, this conversation has burst into the mainstream. UK papers have been reporting on threats; in the United States, Alyssa Rosenberg created the Twitter hashtag #ThreatoftheDay, to re-publish them. Later, after being irritated by a particularly sexist column, I created the hashtag #mencallmethings to cover everything outside the threats – the slurs, the rape fantasies, the hate mail – and saw it trending within the day.

The Internet is no longer a strange hobby; these days, almost everyone has an online presence. If a major part of contemporary life is often unsafe for more than half the population, people notice.

When I first started writing online, I was sure that I would be able to avoid attacks because I thought I knew the rules to the game. As it turns out, those rules are not what I thought they were. Here, then, is a Girl’s Guide to Staying Safe Online.

1. Don’t Post the Wrong Photo. Any Photo.

Three years ago, I posted a picture of myself online for the first time. In this picture, I was outdoors, had a ponytail and wore sunglasses. This photo, I thought, conveyed two things: (1) I was outside, and (2) it was sunny. My first and only e-mail about that photo: “You’re an ugly fucking cunt.”

A year later, I changed it. This time, my hair was long, I wore make-up, had glasses on and was smoking. “She’s ‘doable’ if she dropped the ciggies, the cutesy glasses, and the man-hating attitude,” one man wrote.

This year, I changed it again. Everything had changed but my face; my hair was short, I wore no makeup, and I had dropped the ciggies and glasses. The response: “Hey whens the womyns music festival… Ugly sack of shit freak!!”

Becoming visible – not just for women, but for all marginalized people – creates a specific vulnerability. Photos are often yanked from blogs and social media profiles and placed in hostile forums for evaluation. Photoshops are made; Photoshop contests are held. Trans and genderqueer bloggers are misgendered in whichever way allows for the most vile hatred; fat is shamed; if the blogger is a person of color, photos provide an opportunity for extra racism.

My own experience has been largely about femininity: I’m a white, thin, cisgender woman, but a “feminine” photo (long hair, makeup) results in comments about anal sex, whereas a less feminine photo (short hair, no makeup) results in comments about anal rape. Everyone’s a winner. And selected contestants receive an all-expenses-paid trip to Porn Land: @Mo_Ranyart notes that he “took nonsexual photos of shaving my head [and] got them lifted from my journal and posted on a fetish site.” Attempts to have the photos removed were… unsuccessful.

2. Don’t Have The Wrong Name. Any Name.

Last October, cartoonist Gabby Schulz published a comic about Internet sexism. Titled, in part, “How Every Single Discussion About Sexism And Woman-Type Stuff On The Internet Has Ever Happened,” it detailed a familiar cycle: Man says sexist thing, woman responds, men shout at woman, etc.

Within 24 hours, “men’s rights” blog The Spearhead fulfilled Schultz’s prophecy. Their post, titled “Feminist Cartoonist Bemoans Online Resistance, Claims She is Enslaved by Patriarchy When Men Disagree With Her,” sniffed that Schultz’s cartoon “supposedly depicts what happened when she called some guy sexist.” Predictably sexist comments followed: “I bet ole Gabby is soaking wet with all the attention shes getting tonight,” one Spearhead commenter opined. “Shut the fuck up you stupid cunt,” wrote another. Yet another wrote, “I am not being sexist when I say I do think your point of view is lesbic: you seem to despise all men.” Schulz reports receiving death threats.

So far, so predictable. Except for one tiny detail: Gabby Schulz is a guy. His biography – easily accessible from the offending post – shows him with a full beard, and uses the pronoun “him.” The comic was based on a controversy surrounding cartoonist Kate Beaton. But many harassers had no inclination to fact-check: If someone named “Gabby” didn’t like sexism, that someone had to be a self-pitying girl.

Schulz isn’t the only guy to discover the fun of Writing While Female. Choire Sicha, founder of The Awl, has written about the gender confusion around his own name. When he was writing the New York Times arts listings, he told me, “The letters and emails that arrived for ‘Ms. Sicha’ had that distinct variety of grand mansplaining tone – there was a way in which they ‘talked down’ that the communications for Mr. Sicha didn’t have.” On the other hand, “the notes addressed to male-me treated me as a grown-up – like there was an assumption that I had authority but I was just wrong.”

This is no surprise. A widely cited 2006 University of Maryland survey shows that web users with “female” names are 25 times more likely to be harassed than users with “male” or ambiguous names. (Although, as Sicha’s experience demonstrates, this isn’t web-specific.)

If it’s dangerous to be a girl on the Internet, some people on the Internet will avoid being identified as girls. But Shculz’s and Sicha’s accounts make something else clear: “Ambiguity” doesn’t really work, either. To avoid harassment, one must eschew anything remotely girl-like: names that could be construed as female, subjects related to women, sticking up for specific women, or empathy for women generally. In short: The only way to avoid gendered harassment is to be a man who constantly proclaims his own gender, and who ignores or openly dislikes women. Which is extremely convenient for a certain type of man.

3. Don’t Be Good at Your Job.

In our e-mail exchange, former Shapely Prose blogger Sweet Machine told me that “the beginning of the end” of her career as a blogger was the moment blogging became unsustainable. I knew what she meant, but I’d always regarded it as one of her blog’s biggest successes.

Since its publication in October 2009, Schrodinger’s Rapist,” by Phaedra Starling, has become a part of feminist blog canon. Its explanations of street harassment, rape and doubt have been widely cited and echoed, and the phrase “Schrodinger’s Rapist” itself has become shorthand for threatening encounters. The post garnered 1,216 comments before Shapely Prose shut them off.

Those comments had to be moderated. And, as Sweet Machine puts it, the post “attracted so much positive attention from women that it drew incredible hostility from men.” Moderating comments began to take up the majority of her work time. When Sweet Machine’s mother died, one commenter said that she must have been ashamed of Sweet Machine’s weight–and signed off with “you fucking cunt.”

“Reading the mod queue started to feel like being slapped over and over by strangers,” she says. “The more successful [Shapely Prose] got, the more we got attacked.”

This is the game, for feminist bloggers: the more recognition you receive, the more dangerous the job becomes. Other writers may be able to nurture ambition, and pursue goals without ambivalence. Feminists, on the other hand, live with the fear of Schrodinger’s Promotion. Every step we take toward recognition might be the step that makes blogging itself an intolerable risk. I’ve spoken to other bloggers – one of them male – who have changed pseudonyms or deleted blogs once they got an unacceptably large readership, just to avoid it. Those who stay put have paid a high price.

“[When] I first started blogging, I’d get a string of nasty anonymous comments in a row and that would be about as bad as it’d get,” says Lena Chen. “Now, they’ve moved on to harassing me (and my boyfriend, friends, and readers) on independently set-up sites designed to ruin search results. They have no qualms contacting my family members or employers…”

4. Every Photo Is the Wrong Photo. Every Name is the Wrong Name. Any Kind of Good is Too Good. Don’t Go It Alone.

“As it turns out, there’s nothing right, at all, ever, that you can do,” social media activist Deanna Zandt told me, in a phone interview.

This was not, contrary to appearances, a statement of hopelessness. Zandt means this: That if receiving harassment is an inevitable part of blogging while female, then harassment itself is what has to change.

“They talk about doing eviction defense, or foreclosure defense, or even the Occupy defense,” Zandt says. “In 2005 and 2008, we were doing blog defense from DDOS attacks, and quickly trying to hide women’s information online.”

But Zandt says the conversation about online sexual harassment is beginning to reach a new level, one that could create substantial change. “Women talked about it amongst themselves, or the feminists talked about it amongst themselves, but it’s now breaking out into a place where it has a wider context… We’re really at this moment where we can begin to define the specific, gendered, hateful things that are happening to women online as a specific kind of harassment that requires change through cultural awareness, and perhaps some laws.” She hopes to see campaigns from groups like the Women’s Media Center aimed at creating enforceable policies for online sexual harassment.

Ultimately, the best way to “stay safe” online may simply be to stay online. After all: If there’s no one left willing to complain about the harassment, what are the odds that it’s going to change?

I agree that there is a problem with perpetual victimhood in feminist thinking and there can be a tendency to fetishize being a victim. However, there are concerns that are specific or prevalent to one gender and feminists are not wrong for addressing these issues. I am not a feminist either, but I can acknowledge when an issue specifically or mainly concerns one gender or another.

Posted by Melanie Victoria on 2014-08-04 00:00:55

No, women do not need to "fight the good fight". Women have equal rights. It is feminists acting bitchy and blogging about inflammatory topics online which is causing the backlash among men. Women aren't owed anything in this world, and when you start demanding that OTHER PEOPLE behave the way YOU want them to - you WILL lose.

I'm a woman but I've had it with feminist whining and perpetual victim-hood. No one owes you anything because of your vagina and tender widdle feelings. Also, have you considered that not every women is a frothing leftist who cries and whines everytime someone says something un-PC? Feminism is a joke. If women don't want to get made fun of and insulted online, perhaps they should stop acting so pathetic, demanding and bitchy hmmmm?

Posted by Tired of feminist whining on 2014-08-03 11:36:16

I thought this was going to be a legitimate article about how girls can stay safe online. Instead it is ANOTHER feminist whining piece. I'm a woman, but honestly when feminists write really inflammatory things online and then whine that people are "mean" to them, I have a hard time caring about that.

Also, as a sexual assault survivor I don't appreciate feminists blogging snarkily about rape then crying that they get mean comments. The girl that wrote Schrodinger's Rapist is a professional feminist troll who ONLY blogs about inflammatory topics. She and other inflammatory feminist bloggers have no business crying about how they are treated when they are writing in the nasty, combative way they do. Also, the whole "you need to LISTEN to marginalized people goddamn it!" shtick is getting old. "Marginalized" people need to get off the pity party boat. Most rational adults don't really care for that extreme leftist frothing over -isms. If you are a woman or a trannie (oops un-PC alert!) and "feel marginalized" get a fucking therapist and quit expecting other to coddle you because your goddamned feelings aren't THAT important.

Feminists need to stop acting like victims and understand there are consequences for acting out online. If you put yourself out there and are blogging about topics like rape then expect backlash. You aren't protected from criticism and honestly if you are acting like a bitch (and most feminists online are extremely bitchy) you deserve whatever comments come your way. I'm sick of the victim-hood mentality of feminist bloggers. It's like some woman running topless in the mall and then complaining that people"laughed at" and "objectified" her. Oh poor me! The horrible menz! Oh poor me. SEXISM! RAPE CULTURE! waaaaaaaa.

This article along with most modern internet feminism is a joke.

Posted by Tired of feminist whining on 2014-08-03 11:26:43

Great article. The problem has not seemed to have improved in the nearly two years since it was written. Unfortunately, I fear that no space (online or offline) will be safe for women until society as a whole decides to respect women and value rather than denigrate the feminine. Given that this societal shift is a long way off, we will need to continue to fight the good fight.

Posted by Melanie Victoria on 2013-06-22 17:15:56

Society was guided by some slightly different values. Look at me, I had to give up college for a couple of years because I had to work, but I was very determined to complete my studies one fine day. I did so. I applied for the online masters of public administration when I was still young and even so, I found it hard to bridge some gaps of knowledge and readjust to the learning schedule. That`s why I admire them.Posted by daria spencer on 2012-02-26 04:54:16

I don`t see what`s the harm in being a feminist and blogging about it. You can always still be a feminist and act assertively about it. I mean, do know your place, your rights and privileges, but also accept the others` territories and rights. That`s all about expressing your views without harming the personal opinions of the other people. Feminism is about attitude, social status, professional status. But so self development is. So the chance equality should do good, same as good to men and women these days. There are so many opportunities out there, criminal justice degree online classes, web seminars, learning platforms. We should fill our schedule with constructive activities and preoccupations. Posted by Elliad on 2012-02-26 03:57:16

This is very sad and disturbing news also some of the remarks here are just outrageous. It is important to keep your identity protected online Home ImprovementPosted by eric Lambertoni on 2012-02-24 23:28:32

I can't apologize adequately for those who share similar plumbing-types as mine. But I would like to.
Just know that the more vituperative the unprovoked rant, the more internally tortured they are at being unable to fashion a satisfactory life.
There are decent men around but,unjustly, they're seldom applauded in blogs or articles.
We see drums of flowing tabloid ink about cheating celeb spouses in the tabloids, but has anyone done an article on the long-lasting celebrity marriages?Posted by Earl Graystoke on 2011-12-12 17:56:53

Does this woman think that only feminists get harassed online ? What sort of crazy persecution complex must someone have if they think that they are the only ones who attract this sort of attention online.
It's called "trolling" and it's a huge part of internet culture in this era. It doesn't just happen to feminists, or women. Just like in school, you can and will be harassed and insulted if you are black, mexican, fat, bald, autistic, ugly, pretty, male, female and every other demographic.
And if you say sensational and controversial things online, you will get harassed anyway and they'll just make up any insult, which is why people have insulted men who have female sounding names. It's not really about the demographic they are identifying you as. That's just an insult. People call other people "f*gg*ts" all the time. Is that because the person is gay ? No, it's just an insult. I bet if this woman were fat and she ran into someone at the traffic lights, they would call her fat. Does that mean that all fat people get harassed ? No, it's just the only thing the person knew about you that they could use that they thought would affect you deeply.
When people take themselves too seriously, others will make fun of you. When South Park makes fun of Jews, is it because the creators and viewers hate Jewish people ? No, it's just considered funny. I know it's not PC, but when we want to insult someone, we will just pick any aspect about them that we know they identify with so that our insult hurts more.
But what I hate most is this woman's bias. She practically screams blue murder about this site which is anti-feminism. So wait... it's perfectly ok for YOU to have a site about hating men, but if someone else has a site about hating women, and they talk about you... they're just out to "get you" ? Is it not possible they have their own agenda and that they have nothing personal against you and that you just happen to be a ranting man-hater and they have gone "look, this is exactly what we've been talking about".
And to the people saying "OMG hate sites have sprung up against feminists so what they're saying must be right !".... um.. there's hate sites about Justin Bieber. There's hate sites about British people. There's hate sites about how dogs are better than cats or cats are better than dogs. The whole point of the internet is that anyone can say anything they want. And they can parody you. You act like it's a HUGE deal to setup a website. No. You can set one up in minutes just for a laugh. I've setup many sites "just for a laugh" to make fun of some aspect of culture, or even to embrace it. Everyone has a right to an opinion on the internet, and if you're gonna be outspoken and opinionated, you should frankly be FLATTERED when people take notice and have things to say about you. It's not proof that you're right. It's just proof that you're annoying. Deal with it.Posted by David Robinson on 2011-12-10 04:57:09

When people can comment on things anonymously, they are FAR more likely to be rude than not. The human race is many and varied in opinions and you are far more likely to inspire people to say negative things about you than positive things.
Feminists just live to feel persecuted. That's their whole kick. However, I'm a man and I write a very extensive blog online. It's not controversial or anything but it does re-tell personal experiences that I know would incite derogatory opnions. You know how I avoid negative comments ? I don't allow comments. Simple as that.
If someone wants to give ME (ie not the rest of the world) feedback, they can email me. Amazingly, some people are jealous of what I write (mostly travel stories and funny personal accounts of things) because their lives are less interesting. You know what they do ? They take one of my photos and run to memegenerator with it and they generate hundreds of ridiculous photos by misusing things I've said or just outright insulting my taste in music or abusing me for doing crazy things.
But I don't have a cry and try and get the images taken down. In fact, to prove how little it affected me, I posted a couple of the funniest online. Yes it's an unflattering photo, but so what ? I put it online. It's me. Not all of our photos are flattering ones. Complaining that someone has taken a bad photo off your blog and posted it somewhere else for laughs is like putting up 1,000 photos of yourself with bad hair and a dorky grin up at the mall and then complaining when people draw moustaches and penises on them. OMG, people can be juvenile and heartless ? Call the newspaper, this is breaking news !
Ultimately, if you allow comments on your blog then you're doing it because you love the attention and you don't just want to have people tell YOU how much they love or hate you, but you want them to tell EVERYONE ELSE as well. So you're willing to let anyone say whatever they want about you, and leave it online for the whole world to see.
I have friends on chat networks who ridicule me every day just because I'm me and they can't handle my awesomeness. But I'm happy with who I am. I know what people think, because I talk to people online in other forums, on chat networks, and in real life. The majority love what I do, and a few love to ridicule it. That's life. I'm not a feminist and I'm not even a woman, but people still say hateful things about me online sometimes, but at least it's in places other than on my blog.
If you don't want people to post rude comments, don't invite them to ! You can either make your whole comment system moderated and make that clear, and people will have less inclination to abuse you if they know it won't be immediately posted online for everyone to see, or you can require manual signup confirmation to confirm who people are before they comment. If people really genuinely want to comment, they will go to the trouble to get approved and do so. The trolls won't bother.
But putting up an angry, spiteful rant about men on a forum or blog and then leaving comments open is sorta like putting a nude photo of yourself on your front fence and leaving a blackboard and chalk beside it. The internet is a nasty place and if you want to be opinionated, either make it a one way medium by disabling comments altogether, or require moderation.
Or is it just that people like the one in this article just live to complain about how persecuted they are. I mean, that's the whole topic of what this author is writing about... so is it such a surprise that she opens up her comments page specifically so that people CAN persecute her and therefore validate her opinion ? But you know what hunny ? We all get persecuted when we put ourselves out there online. Feminists, non feminists, women and men. None of us are immune. If you don't like it, don't ask people to comment, at least not publicly.Posted by David Robinson on 2011-12-10 04:21:25

Some quotes from feminists that I managed to google in about 2 minutes:
"I feel that 'man-hating' is an honorable and viable political act, that the oppressed have a right to class-hatred against the class that is oppressing them." -- Robin Morgan, Ms. Magazine Editor.
"To call a man an animal is to flatter him; he's a machine, a walking dildo."
-- Valerie Solanas, Author of the SCUM Manifesto
"I want to see a man beaten to a bloody pulp with a high-heel shoved in his mouth, like an apple in the mouth of a pig." -- Andrea Dworkin
"All sex, even consensual sex between a married couple, is an act of violence perpetrated against a woman." -- Catherine MacKinnon
"The more famous and powerful I get the more power I have to hurt men." -- Sharon Stone; Actress
"Men who are unjustly accused of rape can sometimes gain from the experience." - Catherine Comins
These are not fringe types, these are women quoted in women's studies textbooks. Feminism is misandry, pure and simple. It is no less a hate movement than the KKK and deserves the same level of treatment.Posted by Kevin Hillton on 2011-12-08 06:04:57

Everyone has own opinion! All of us have different points of view. Feminist women are strong, open and independed, they are doing something, expressing their thoughts, ideas, wishes. And I wish all feminists to be patient and not to pay attention to offensive words. Do not forget that critics makes you stronger and more popular. Think what kind of people will write you unrespectful, offensive words and threats? Of course, men, which are weak, dependent on others' opinion, narrow-minded and very tight in money, such people, who even can't live from income to income and taking debts and payday loans. So be happy))).Posted by Natly Wares on 2011-12-06 03:42:15

Gregory,
Uh, Yea. Verbal abuse begets verbal abuse. It's not rocket science... You insult me, I insult you back. I don't care if you are a woman. I treat everyone the same.Posted by Jason Stowers on 2011-11-24 20:55:02

Jason -
What the hell are you talking about?
You read a blog post you don't like and you think that entitles you to become verbally abusive to the woman who writes it?
I'm sorry, but that's a bunch of nonsense - also, I know damned well you wouldn't treat a MALE blogger like that.
If you don't like what a blog says, you can RESPECTFULLY voice your disagreement, or you can click away from that blog and find one that you agree with.
Grow up, brotherPosted by Gregory A. Butler on 2011-11-24 20:43:26

Gregory,
Others have tried the soft spoken gentle approach to discourse and have been unsuccessful. When Men are continually bombarded with hateful, nasty and disrespectful insults by feminists, the only way to communicate with them is with the same in return as it seems to be the only language they understand. When feminists start to treat men with respect, MRA's might not feel the need for such hostility.Posted by Jason Stowers on 2011-11-24 20:37:36

To all the MRAs on this thread.
It's one thing to have a legitimate political difference with the ideology of feminism and to express that idea in calm, nonpersonalized political terms.
It's a whole other ballgame to get personally insulting and verbally abusive. That's not political discourse, that's just being a bully and a jerk.
If that bullying escalates to rape threats, death threats and menacing people's relatives, it has become outright criminal conduct (in my state, New York, they call it "Making Terroristic Threats", it's a FELONY and you can go upstate for quite a few years for that)
So dudes, Man Up, quit bullying women online and if you can't keep your disagreements civil and respectful, shut the hell up.Posted by Gregory A. Butler on 2011-11-24 19:30:02

I don't know what to tell ya, I'm a big, hairy fool of a man. I like beer, football and titties, and... I don't have the slightest idea why these asshole men pick on you women. I really don't. It totally amazes me, following these web incidents, how things get escalated from "Guys, don't do that" into OMG YOU CASTRATING BITCHESS!!!!!!1! I don't want to say there's something basically wrong with some men, but that might be the answer. Anyway, thanks for shining some light on the uglier corners of the 'net. Hopefully, some people will recognize themselves and clean up their act. Hopefully.Posted by Shane Stringer on 2011-11-18 17:29:32

"Dissension is not allowed".
This just gives power to the dissenters. You need to be prepared with good arguments and present your point of view. I can see deleting posts that are vulgar, but free speech is the hallmark of a free society. We can learn a lot by those that dissent or have different points of view.Posted by Camille10 on 2011-11-18 16:25:56

My comment was not allowed. It said it needed to be moderated. I thought it was a fair estimate of the situation between men and women. Hopefully you will consider posting it.Posted by Camille10 on 2011-11-18 16:22:54

My comment may not be too well liked but I had to register just to make it.
I think you are actually giving Power to the people who are saying these vicious things. Sites like 'a voice for men' are taking this and using it for their own agenda, which is promoting Male as Victim...They have turned the tables. I'm sure you've read what they say...which is really the same thing they accuse women of.
There is a lot of hate going on. But look at some of their stuff they present. Sure, it doesn't come close in the quantity of attacks against females (just the snuff films and violence in hollywood and porn should be proof of this), but there is some hate towards males too. Look up that youtube video "Scum having fun" about some young women laughing and dancing after one of them shoots an innocent man that is just sitting reading.
We need to focus on who exactly is behind this. There is evidence that the Feminist movement was co-opted early on by operatives, even CIA. When I was a young woman in college, I remember my friends were jumping into bed with different guys, saying that if men could play this way they could too. I was saying back then (late 70's) that the Woman's movement went in the wrong direction. It should never have been about woman and men competing or about how many guys a woman could go out and screw. It should have been about gaining respect for more gentle qualities that the world is badly in need of, such as: cooperation, wisdom, caring, love, gentleness, forgiveness, humbleness, etc. All of which are associated with feminine nature (which is innate in both men and women, just as masculine qualities are).
All this bickering and hate spewing out is only helping the Elites. They stay in power above the Governmental enforcement levels by dividing us. The Government is now being used to push more and more laws that ultimately are making us all prisoners to the Elite. That is what government has become in the U.S., just a layer of enforcement.
Women need to wise up. We need to stop reacting to emotional tirades, take responsibility for our lives (Please do not start a campaign against these few men...it will only end in more censorship).
You are just feeding these guys, because they know they can get a reaction.
We need more women using their brains for intellectual purposes, to fight the encroaching police state.
As a woman I don't look at myself as a victim. I'm part of humanity. I actively participate in many political and economic blogs. What I do, is I don't go on there with a "sexy" avatar... The men there don't give a damn about "sexy" when they are talking politics and economics. Many women make this mistake, and think they can get attention by with "sexy" avatars or sexy "talk" (don't tell me it doesn't happen..it does!!). I have never been abused in political/economic type sites, even though they know I'm a woman.
We need more women who can write logically about the Wars that are going on, backed up with hard evidence. There are so many issues going on right now...so many things to write about. Men have actually asked me why most women aren't interested in politics and economics. There are very few women writers that are challenging the REAL perpetrators (the elites). I saw an article at Huffington once and it was about Women and abuse. The women that commented were saying terrible things about men....So it gets into this back and forth tirade by both sides...
I'm not trying to say that its ok for this type of abuse...it is not ok for women to abuse men either. But you give it power when you respond to it.
I'm 53. I was quite pretty when I was younger (and I think I still am :))
I've been harrassed, sure. But over all I've had pretty good experience with men. Some of best conversations and relations were with men. They are under attack, ALSO, by the elites because they are ultimately a major threat to the agenda of the Elites.
Please think about it.
PeacePosted by Camille10 on 2011-11-18 16:20:00

Oh , and BTW Joe , you appear to have been very well trained at the Feminist Armed Forces School of Tactics, pick some perceived minor transgression in an argument ( like the stop whining comment) or indeed some transgression from somewhere in the past, inflate this to primacy in the debate, so that you can ignore the substance of the argument presented.
My grandma had a simple way of stating the obvious "if ya can't stand the heat , get out of the kitchen"Posted by Greg Canning on 2011-11-18 14:39:26

@Joe Macaré
Nope Joe I have my qualification in respectful discussion, when one is falsely accused of DV "they" send you along to a feminist run course to teach you how to disagree with a women, they call it "fighting fair" , bottom line , don't disagree. If you put back the original comment in context , perhaps your audience could appreciate its full impact, only exposing this phrase out of context to your audience with your trite summation is really not fighting fair , is it? But then I don't expect YOU to fight fair.Posted by Greg Canning on 2011-11-18 14:24:11

"I fail to see what is disrespectful about “stop whining.”"
Either you are being monumentally disingenuous, Greg, or you need an entry level introduction to what qualifies as respectful discussion. I suspect it's the former.
Anderson, "dissension" and even dissent are allowed, and can be easily found in comments on other articles on this website.Posted by Joe Macaré on 2011-11-18 14:10:46

That is not the way it works Greg and you know it.
Dissension is not allowed.Posted by Anderson Davies on 2011-11-18 14:04:22

My first comment was deleted. Might I just say that people who wish to post articles in an open forum that invites comments should be prepared to accept the comment good or bad. If the comments are bad , and I fail to see what is disrespectful about "stop whining" , its simply expressing a point of view, then perhaps one should look to themselves and the content they are trying to spread publicly rather than, censoring the comments, that presumably you wrote the piece to attract in the first place. If you want affirmation rather than debate then make you points on a private forum directed at like minded individuals. Simple as that.Posted by Greg Canning on 2011-11-18 13:41:56

It occurs to me that may have sounded a bit like 'let the strong male type do the heavy lifting' - that wasn't the intention.
It was more the opinion that insults designed to upset a female person A are less likely to upset a male person B, and thus be 'easier' to deal with.
Maybe I'm naive and the experience would count for more, but it sounds like it's the opposite - the endless repetition grinds people down.Posted by furicle on 2011-11-18 13:22:55

Every time I think I've heard the worst of it, somebody finds another rung down the evolutionary ladder.
Hardly a solution, but perhaps finding some male pre-screeners to separate the crud from the genuinely needing moderation would reduce the trauma, and make men part of the solution...Posted by furicle on 2011-11-18 12:44:06

I would like to remind people commenting on this site, once again, of the simple request printed next to the comment box: "Please be respectful in your comments and try to remain on-topic."
Insulting the author, saying "stop whining," or just posting a URL without comment will get your post deleted, and maintaining this behavior will lead to the privilege of commenting on this website being revoked.Posted by Joe Macaré on 2011-11-18 10:31:25

The first three posts confirm the level of stalking going on toward Ms. Doyle, and other notable feminist bloggers in general.
If a man feels "threatened" by any feminist writing, enough to devote entire websites to fill with anger, threats and sexual assault innuendoes (directed at specific female bloggers or in general,) CLEARLY you're proving the points mentioned in the above article. Men who are secure in their masculinity (& femininity) don't resort to these pathetic tactics. It is a sign of weakness.
I'm becoming less and less tolerable of this behavior, and can firmly say, if you didn't have the protection of hiding behind a computer screen, you'd be in real trouble.Posted by Laura Gentle on 2011-11-18 10:00:10

Well Sady, if you are and other feminists are getting ugly resposes to your articles and comments, don't you think there might be a reason? Using a male identiy to conceal the fact that you are a female will do no good as long as the conveyed message remains misandric. I know it's sometimes difficult for you to think that you could ever do anything wrong but when you spread lies and insult an entire segment of the poulation long enough, they will eventually start to fight back.Posted by Jason Stowers on 2011-11-18 09:44:30

"standard feminist misandry" -- Except feminists aren't misandrists. Anti-feminists are. Feminists are convinced men are better than society tries to teach them to be.
"If you are respectful, balanced and not sexist in the opinions you express, then the comments you receive are likely to be in the same spirit" Seriously? You've got to be kidding me. Go read the Schrodinger's Rapist piece mentioned in the article. It is one of the most warm-spirited, gentle, and funny pieces of Internet advice I've ever read, and as this article notes, it was flamed constantly when it went up. If you think that hate only seeks out hate, I'm sorry, but you're direly mistaken.
"a hateful little paranoid" -- The woman is coolly recounting threats of violence she and others have actually received, and that makes her paranoid and hateful?Posted by Charis on 2011-11-18 08:03:07

Ms Doyle writes a thoughtful piece about the abuse women have encountered online, and the first comment below the piece is:
"This woman sounds like a hateful little paranoid."
The second comment tells her to 'stop whining,' and the third directs you to a website with the url avoiceformen.com/feminism/feminist-lies
Almost makes you want to weep.Posted by ella mos on 2011-11-18 06:22:54

@ Sady Doyle "Ultimately, the best way to “stay safe” online may simply be to stay online."
Well it depends what you want to say Sandy , if you are respectful, balanced and not sexist in the opinions you express, then the comments you receive are likely to be in the same spirit. If you preach standard feminist misandry and hatred , you can expect some flakI If you want to publish in a public place, stop whining, woman up and accept the consequences, just like Vliet Tiptree http://radicalhub.wordpress.com/2011/10/04/radical-feminism-in-the-21st-century/Posted by Greg Canning on 2011-11-18 03:31:49

This woman sounds like a hateful little paranoid. In this day and age it's hard to understand how the profession of journalism is being reduced to the worst of their trade as the industry goes under.Posted by Kevin Hillton on 2011-11-18 03:22:07