New Romantic

Just when you thought it couldn't get gayer than Emo, along comes New Romantic. Often called New Wave, New Romantic started in the 80's as an excuse for men to wear make-up and loath life, like the Generation X nobodies they all are. Men dressed themselves like women (because androgyny is like, so cool), and women dress themselves like Gothic Medieval Revivalists. New Romantics listen to "bands" like Spandex Ballet, Classix Asteroix and XX AXALYYI FROM OUTER SPACE.

FACT! The term New Romantic is actually an oxymoron as there is nothing new or romantic about it.

New Romantic music is pretty much just 80's synth-pop with an air of elitism and pretentiousness about it. At the peak of New Romantic, the most state of the art synthesizers around were Casio model Hammond organs (remember that little battery powered keyboard you had as a child? Bash out a 4/4 beat, hold any key and moan about life. Hey presto! New Romantic!).

New Romantic in the modern day is an underground movement, but that hasn't made it any less gay. In fact, it has been noted by Senior Encyclopedia Dramatica faggotry researchers that New Romantic is staging a revival. Hipsters everywhere can be seen shaving the side of their heads, wearing bow-ties and Ben Shermans, buying the most ridiculously pointy shoes possible and generally crossing the gender line.