"My husband has got the worst baby fever ever... but me, not so much (I raised my brother's kids). However, I am gung-ho to get this baby show on the road, and being that I just turned 40 I'm both a tad worried but mostly impatient. btw - when I was preg my point of view changed and all the baby/family plan made total sense. Then I mc and went back to my old indifferent self. I don't know what's wrong with me"

So, I'm 100% certain I want at least 1 more baby, maybe 2. But when I think of another baby in the house, I'm often just, like, "meh." Someone one said (I have no idea who, but it was in response to the exhaustion of having little kids): envision what you want your thanksgiving table to look like. Or, for me, I envision who I want around me when I'm old, too. "Get this baby show on the road" Ahh just the way you said all this resonates so much... The early months with DD were a little atypical due to here being premature, in the NICU, me workin alot, my husband being a SAHF, me exclusively pumping while he took care of her, etc. maybe everyone feels this way but I love her a lot more now than I did then. But I also think part of the "meh" comes from whatever is in me that made me work in high-intensity healthcare setting, maybe similar to you. Not to say that ICU nurse = callused or unemotional, but, I don't know, there's something different... I spent a lot of time thinking about this while being with DD in the same hospital where I had worked and done clinical rotations (not the NICU itself but related areas). I just know I'm not going to react the same way as someone without a very medical/nursing background.

So, nothing is wrong with you! Or at least I refuse to think that because then I would have to assume there is something wrong with me too!

So much has been happening on this thread! Congrats to all the mamas with BFPs and baby dust for the rest of us.

I had to take a break from thinking so much about TTC. September was going to be our last month of trying but I wasn't quite ready and, surprisingly, neither was DH (like some other folks mentioned, he is kind of dreading reliving the tiny baby, sleep-deprived phase or parenting). October brought the begin of renovations on our new house (which has turned out to be an even bigger drama than anticipated), DH's crazy tour schedule, and lengthy requests from DD for a little sister. She got up one morning and said "I'm a big girl now so you can have another baby. I'm ready to share." I thought it was jut weird and random, but she keeps talking about it, choosing names, setting aside clothes she's outgrown for the new baby.

So, now I'm CD 29, which is long for me, had one day of cramping a week ago, and some cramps this morning which have stopped. I was using a ovulation microscope and think we may have BD'd in the right window but this month has been so many kinds of crazy. I don't know how long we can keep saying one more month. And, there are 4!! pregnant teacher at my school and 2 expectant daddies. Hard to stop thinking about it ...

Your stories keep me hopeful, and let me know other people are going through the same thing.

I just started my period 3 days ago, I am hoping to start TTC as soon as this cycle is over! I could use some baby dust, my periods are ALLL over the place so I will start using the OPKS as soon as my period is done with.

Originally Posted by Ratchet
... I also think part of the "meh" comes from whatever is in me that made me work in high-intensity healthcare setting, maybe similar to you. Not to say that ICU nurse = callused or unemotional, but, I don't know, there's something different... I spent a lot of time thinking about this while being with DD in the same hospital where I had worked and done clinical rotations (not the NICU itself but related areas). I just know I'm not going to react the same way as someone without a very medical/nursing background.

So, nothing is wrong with you! Or at least I refuse to think that because then I would have to assume there is something wrong with me too!

Ratchet - thank you dearly for the vote of solidarity! I really thought it must only be me. I'm looking forward to getting my clear baby/kid/family vision back - barred only by the obstacle of an elusive BFP. As a habitual overachiever (4.0 GPA, top of class, top CRNA school acceptance (then backed out due to baby - only to mc 3 wks later)) it's hard to accept something that can't just be mastered by hard work! GAH!

So many things have happened in such a short time. On Sat DH and I drove down to Orlando for a concert, which was awesome b/c I got to meet one of my favorite musicians. We got to roam around ikea too, and we decided on some things for redoing the house. Also, I'm pretty sure I O'd on Sat as temp has jumped waaay up. We got our BDing in 2 days b4 O, and I've been using preseed and taking extended release mucinex (guaifenesin). My CM was very much improved. Its normally kinda thick, but taking this def made it more like egg whites and there was ALOT more than usual, so I'm hopeful. HOWEVER, today I went to a new primary care doc and he wants to remove a mole. He was super concerned about it and said normally he just watches them but with the shape and colors of it hes alarmed. He wanted me to have it removed and biopsied right away, but the soonest I can get in is on the 11th (he only does "surgeries" on Tues). I'm so worried now about skin cancer, my aunt had it and I'm freaking out. How will this effect things if I do get prego this month? How will this effect TTCing in the near future if I don't get prego this cycle?

Originally Posted by Siuann I went to a new primary care doc and he wants to remove a mole. He was super concerned about it and said normally he just watches them but with the shape and colors of it hes alarmed. He wanted me to have it removed and biopsied right away

Siuann - two things about this bug me.

1 - the MD should have taken a biopsy on the spot. It's like scraping it, or can be done with a small hollow bore needle, and the cells are placed in a jar and sent to the lab. If there is the highest level of concern, that would certainly be the route (along with scheduling removal, of course - and it will be entirely biopsied at this time as well usually).

2 - this should be assessed by a derm specialist. It is very unusual for a primary doc to be a mole remover... even in FL (where I used to live too). Many skin cancers do not metastasize, but melanomas do and they are serious (they are the ones that are big, brownish black, raised, irregular borders, sometimes itchy).

I have skin cancer history in my family - in fact have had a death due to melanoma. It's nothing to take lightly - I had my first precancerous lesion removed at 27yo. However, if caught early skin cancers usually haven't spread anywhere yet and so that is good. If it's a melanoma, something like a PET scan would likely be performed to assess if it has spread. This involves a short fast followed by an injection of a sugar/radioactive tracer and a scan of your body. Not sure how that goes for pregnancy though.

Losing a pregnancy is such a difficult thing to go through. I wanted to mention there is a trying to conceive after loss forum here. (I just wanted to link it in case that would be helpful to anyone - it is kind of hard to find.)

southbay I'm so sorry. I know how terrible it feels. I lost my baby at 12 weeks (8 week developed) officially Aug 18 and my first AF was Oct 4. I thought that turn around was pretty fast considering. Wishing time to mourn your loss and a speedy recovery.

Hi Ladies, could somebody move me to the waiting list please? I'm currently 5 DPO and determined to wait it out until the day AF is due (8th Nov).I seem to be handling the waiting a lot better this time round.
Congratulations to all who have got their BFPs and fingers crossed for the rest. To the ladies who have had a loss I'm sending hugs and strength to carry on.

SouthBay and Rosie - I am so very sorry to hear what you both have been going through. My heart goes out to you. Be kind to yourselves right now.

I had "vanishing twin" when pregnant with my son but it all happened so fast I never really understood or processed the information fully. I remember they sent me home with miscarriage info because it was proposed that I'd likely lose the other little bean in the U/S too. What a roller coaster that was.

I am nearing the end of 2ww. I got a little overboard looking for signs, took a test way too soon (BFN obviously) after I had some very light pink spotting two days ago. I've never spotted outside of my period a day in my life so I'm a little confused about that. This 2ww is kind of a crazy place to be. As DP said, "you are very self-aware right now" yeah, too much so and wish I'd stop obsessing.

innacircle- honestly, I'm usually ALOT more proactive and I ask alot more questions than I did at this appt, I was just completely floored. I'm much more clear headed now. The doc I go to is a Family Physician and he keeps Tuesdays for doing small out patient surgeries in office. We live in a rural town and I don't think that there is dermatologist in town. The closest one is most likely 45 min away.

SunnaRising- our cycles are close! I'm 4 DPO today, AF is due Nov. 9th. When are you going to test? I usually try to hold out til after AF is supposed to show, but I have a good feeling about this cycle.

AFM- Much more chill now, I just wish DH hadn't of opened the halloween candy for the neighborhood kids...

I am kinda in a weird place right now. Finally got all my blood work done this month (3 tests- day 3, day 8, day 21) and my husband had his initial physical, we have an appt. on Nov. 18th to go over the results and send in the official referral to the fertility clinic- so hopefully we will get an appt. early in the New Year. I am kinda hopefully we could be pregnant for our first anniversary in Feb.

Trying not to think about it too much but its hard.

Me 28, DH 31 , 2 Kitties and working towards having Baby #1.
“The past has no power over the present moment.” Eckhart Tolle

I think we're going to DTD one last time before December. Not that it'll likely do any good. If I had ovulated the first time my body tried I'd be 8 DPO and itching to test. I'm pretty sure I'm still waiting to O (but threatening to O any moment for a few days now). I've also ordered some Vitex.

If any of you haven't seen The Great Sperm Race, you totally should. Its split in 6 parts on YouTube. Very humbling IMHO. I think its pretty much a miracle anyone gets pregnant. Since it takes the "average young couple" ~4 months to conceive, their numbers really do give a one in a billion chance that any one sperm is going to be successful. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAnMymnJiLM

This Mommy and Military Daddy are loving their son.
DS born Dec 2010 Pregnant with #2, having another !

Hey all I'm on cycle day 39 hubby bought me them clear blue digital to take on Friday morning and I'm use to 35 day cycle so I'm taking fri morning since we have a party that night lol, and also I need info on preseed. Me and hubby bought some tonight to try when do u start using it and any experiences that are good out if it? Thanks

I think we're going to DTD one last time before December. Not that it'll likely do any good. If I had ovulated the first time my body tried I'd be 8 DPO and itching to test. I'm pretty sure I'm still waiting to O (but threatening to O any moment for a few days now). I've also ordered some Vitex.

If any of you haven't seen The Great Sperm Race, you totally should. Its split in 6 parts on YouTube. Very humbling IMHO. I think its pretty much a miracle anyone gets pregnant. Since it takes the "average young couple" ~4 months to conceive, their numbers really do give a one in a billion chance that any one sperm is going to be successful. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAnMymnJiLM

I watched this, it was really great for perspective, so thank you for sharing. Though I have previously dealt with infertility, I had a very easy time in terms of conception with the ids between then and now. And now I am back to secondary infertility, and miscarriages. It's easy to feel like I MUST be doing something terribly wrong, but it reminds me that I was very lucky it was so easy when it was. This time it is a different journey.