A doctor a Minister, a Lawyer, and an Accountant are friends. The lawyer finds out he is dying of cancer and gives each of his friends an envelope full of money. He tells them he can’t stand the thought of being without it so at his funeral would they each place the money in the coffin. They all agree. At the funeral they wait until everyone else has viewed the body and each goes up one at a time. The Doctor places the thick envelope in the coffin, then the minister places his thick envelope in the coffin. Finally the accountant places his small envelope in the coffin. After the funeral the Doctor and Minister ask the accountant what happened, for he had agreed to put the money in the coffin. The accountant said, ” But my lawyer has always taken a personal check!”

A lawyer, a doctor and an accountant are all applying to join the FBI. The have passed all tests but the final one. All three are in a waiting room ready for their final test. First, the lawyer is given a gun and told to go into the room and execute the spy sitting in the chair. The lawyer goes into the room, sees the person sitting in the chair blindfolded. He lifts the blindfold and sees its his wife. He leaves the room saying he could not shoot her. The lawyer is told he failed the test and can not become an FBI agent. Next the doctor is given a gun and is told to execute the spy. The doctor goes into the room, sees the person sitting in the chair blindfolded. He lifts the blindfold and sees its his wife. He leaves the room saying he could not shoot her. The doctor is told he failed the test and can not become an FBI agent. Finally the accountant is given a gun and is told to execute the spy. The accountant goes into the room and the agents outside the room hear a gun shot. After this they hear a lot a rustling and banging. Finally the accountant comes out and says, “someone put blanks in the gun so I had to choke her to death.”