Um, this is a quote
by the Japanese calligrapher Miki Youseki-san. Right, folks, so in order to
spend today laughing, the first thing would be to laugh even if you're faking
it!

Ready and...!

(strained laughing)

I laughed and
laughed and really laughed. That's a way to start the day. Whatever happens,
let's keep laughing! Yeah.

(strained laughing)
So on that note, (strained laughing) we've received some mail. I'll read some
out.

From
Suzu-Arashi-san.

"Ohno-san, good
morning. Please listen to my father's story of carelessness. This happened on
the way home from shopping at the supermarket. He'd set off after putting the
bag full of vegetables on the passenger seat. Then, my dad pulled the
handbrake and then let out a startled UWAAA! I peered over to see what had
happened and it turned out he wasn't holding the handbrake but rather one of
the newly purchased leeks! Since then, when coming back from the supermarket
my dad now leaves the bags of groceries in the back seat."

Wait a minute, is
this true? I mean, if it were a leek, it'd be inside a bag. The leek itself.
Don't they normally put it inside a transparent bag? Ahh, there are places
where they don't bag them, right? So it wasn't in one, huh?

But you'd realise,
right?? Father!

I mean, even just
the thickness and difference in temperature of a handbrake and a leek... Were
they the same? (laughs) 'Since then, when coming back from the supermarket my
dad now leaves the bags of groceries in the back seat.'

That's incredible.
Huh? Is this for real? That's pretty funny, if you were there to see it. Man,
so it's kinda... I kinda want unbelievable stories now. The ones that make
you go, "That's a lie, right?"

I'd like to take
submissions for fake-sounding true stories. But... let's not lie, okay?
(laughs) But then to answer seriously might be kinda... right? Embarrassing.
But they exist, right, these sorts of things? Mm. Stories of carelessness.

Well, we'd like to
have you enjoy your day. There's plenty of things to laugh about, right? So
let's spend today laughing!

Well, starting today
I'll being having concerts at the Yahoo! Auction Dome. I'd like it to be full
of laughs while singing and dancing.