Streator Officials: We Need More One-Way Roads To Confuse Out-Of-Towners

STREATOR, IL – During last weeks transportation and roadway meeting, city of Streator officials came to the conclusion that the town needed more one-way roads to confuse the hell out of non-residents.

“Driving through town just proved to be too easy for some visitors to Streator, we needed to make it more of a challenge.” Dan Triggs, Road Commissioner, told The Cob.

“Lets be honest, we don’t have a lot to do here in Streator but laugh at wrong way drivers. There isn’t a better form of comedy than watching someone crap their pants after realizing they turned the wrong way down a one-way street.” Mr. Triggs continued.

“In keeping with Streator tradition we’ve added several one-way roads that just suddenly change into a two-way as well. It’ll be hilarious.” The already laughing Road Commissioner concluded.

According to reports received by The Cob, the traffic changes will be completed sometime in 2018.