He was appointed a public defender on Tuesday and was ordered held without bond in the Wake County Detention Center.

Investigators haven't offered a motive for the crime.

Zacherl's mother had no comment Tuesday afternoon, and those who know him said they are surprised by the murder charge.

Tongate, his sister, Allison Tongate, said, was a fun-loving man who studied intercultural communications and was a volunteer with refugees and also at a suicide prevention hotline.

"He was just very caring and gentle and very generous," she said. "He loved his family, especially his nieces and nephews. He just touched so many people's hearts and lives."

Family members of Tongate, who is from New Mexico, said they were aware of his relationship with Zacherl but that they had never met him and that they are still in the process of learning about him and what happened.

According to the North Carolina Department of Public Safety, Zacherl was convicted in May on charges of obtaining property by false pretense and larceny and spent seven months in prison before being paroled in November 2012.

He also has felony convictions of drug charges and misdemeanor convictions on charges of assault and communicating threats.

Lightfoot3Jan 15, 2014

I've seen a case where someone stabbed themselves and a family member was charged with murder. The forensic evidence by the defense team finally got the DA to drop the charges, but if not for that good defense team, the dude would have been sent up the river. I hope the truth, no matter what it is, reigns in this case.

lissaandbradJan 14, 2014

REALLY. I agree. That's your comment. Yes, his boyfriend. This is so sad, so tragic. My heart breaks for all involved.