Alice B. Grist

Dearest My life has taken quite the turn lately. Less than a fortnight ago, my husband had a heart attack, and since then has, thankfully, been treated and is in recovery. Of course at that same time, the children became ill with a variety of symptoms, most notable being vomiting and full on spots caused by Hand Foot and Mouth (not the same as Foot and Mouth in Cows).

I have had a mini medical education, now knowing my myocardial infarctionsfrom my cardiac arrests, and my chicken pox from my ordinary pox. I have a deeper understanding of cholesterol and a newfound passion for all green and whole foods.

What a few days it has been, it feels like a lifetime, and here we are, suddenly in February. I am tired, so bone tired. And so bone grateful too. Things like this are gifts to our imagination, so that we can envisage the worst and find the way through. As we navigate the drama, so we can stick tight to hope and faith, and at times, be rewarded with the simple things, such as life, and not the other...

I am currently a little out of words though, even art is not stirring my soul. I am sure that will all come in time, and I will likely plough it into the courses and books that I had such high hopes to complete sooner than this!

I simply wanted to drop you a line full of love, so that if you happen to be negotiating the chaotic curves of life, you might feel less alone.

Here is something I wrote a whole ago, in The High Heeled Guide to Spiritual Living, I allowed the book to open on a random page, and just like my tarot cards, the book gifted me the perfect resilient answer...

"The dark feelings & external chaos swoop in to cause madness sot hat when the madness lifts, all that is left are things that are useful to life. True chaos allows for progressive, exciting and creative change. Life falls to pieces, but then on the other side, and with a little faith, things can come up rosy."

A part of this tree is in flux, changing, adapting, turning colour with its new guise. Another part is lagging behind, absorbing the warmth of the past, reluctant to shift. Soon it will be forced. But for now it is a gentle lull into newness. Same goes for us. Same goes for us. Go easy. Be like the tree. Hold on whilst moving on and eventually everything will drop and life will look different.

The past has a horrible and tumultuous pull doesn't it? We try to escape and yet it pulls us swirling and insane back into it. Things we laid to rest many moons ago can raise their heads and capture our heart and before we know it we are existing 'five years ago and three thousand miles away' (thanks Elbow).

This card asks you to bring an awareness to this backwards thinking. There is no profit in it. It simply lowers us to a lesser time, a time before we learned and grew from the experience. And we all know nothing can be changed or altered as we survey those past troubles. Energy spent on those times is a waste and disconnects us from what we have become. Realign with who you are now. Who you have become. Your hopes and desires as they are in this moment. Count your blessings but know that your blessings stem from the hard times and so really those difficult times were blessings too. In their own weird way. Make peace with your pain and concentrate hard on what you have right now. Refuse to lose yourself to a lesser time.

Follow me on Instagram and Facebook for regular tarot / spiritual guidance. Book your own reading in the tabs above!

I opened up my second book 'The High Heeled Guide to Spiritual Living' and this was what I saw. Perfect. Today has had it's frustrations. I was recording a personal meditation for a client earlier, only to discover, right at completion that it was actually not even recording. So undeterred, if slightly miffed, I started again. This time I made sure it was recording. Then at the very end, just as I was bringing the med to a close, an error message popped up. And as it disappeared it took all my vocals with it. Even my producer musician husband could not retrieve it.

I had spent the best part of two hours recording nothingness. And for those of you who have young kids, you know two hours is precious time. I could have been sitting, daydreaming, reading, flirting with the hubby, eating... There is a lot I could have done in two hours. Plus of course the meds had been wonderful. They were deep and potent and I was so proud of them. But I guess they were not meant to be. Or perhaps they were meant for me?

Either way it was two hours of intensity my client won't get, but that maybe I got something from. There really are no mistakes and to receive this page, this powerful reminder has refreshed my outlook on what had felt like a waste of time. How have there been, 'no mistakes' in your imperfect world today? Please do share below.

The book this excerpt is taken from is available internationally in print and kindle from Soul Rocks Books.

Do not allow the past to so consume you that you can't see what is offered to you in the present. Yes there may have been turbulence, chaos and emotional upset, and yes it is easily felt if you choose to revisit it. But the Key word here is choice. You choose to feel it. You could just as easily choose not to feel it, to focus on the present, to count your blessings and to properly embrace all that is good in your life. The chaos was a necessary part of crafting your present day. But it is not something you need to indulge. Let it be past. Turn around and face what is beautifully yours.