7 Steps to More Effective Facebook Fan Pages. 5 Tips to Develop a Twitter Following. 11 Sure-Fire Ways LinkedIn Generates Business Leads. 8 Rules for Building Brands with Blogs. Do these type of headlines sound familiar? Do they get your attention? I confess to sometimes writing them myself.

Unfortunately, we often pay more attention to tactics than our voice. Too bad because your voice in social media is your brand equity.

Social media marketing is different from advertising, sales promotion or direct marketing. It’s a conversation, not a monologue. It won’t work if your constituents don’t believe you always have their best interests at heart. Just try to tell someone to “Buy This Now” and see what happens.

So it’s not what you need to make someone do. It’s how you have to be. Here are 16 Be’s for finding a social voice that works for your brand.

Be helpful

Be willing to ask for help

Be informative

Be of value in teaching someone something new

Be willing to share

Be able to ask others to share in return

Be positive

Be forthcoming

Be inspirational

Be a good listener

Be able to carry on a good conversation

Be honest with your audience

Be able to express a point of view convincingly

Be able to respect those who do and don’t accept what you have to say

Be willing to give before you have to get

Be yourself

The list is as long or as short as the authentic qualities you have when you relate to others.

So the next time you see someone or some business brag, boast, bring nothing to the party other than an endless stream of press releases and company news either in a blog, tweet, comment or through a bit.ly link, feel free to remind them of this advice.

Do you have any “Be’s” of your own? Send them my way. I’d like to hear so we can keep a running list together.

What are net promoters? Consumers who rate products on the internet? Mommy Bloggers? People who Tweets about brands on Twitter? Fans on Facebook? Hold that thought.

For students of relationship marketing and CRM, net promoters are the driving force of Fred Reichheld’s book, The Ultimate Question. Fred studied and surveyed the customers of 100’s of companies and came to a singular conclusion: The most admired and profitable companies are the ones with the greatest percentage of net promoters – people who enthusiastically answer in the affirmative the question, “How likely is it that you would recommend this company to a friend or colleague?”

Fred developed the Net Promoter Score (NPS). The NPS is the percentage of people who are “promoters” of a company minus the “passives” and “detractors” (NPS = P – D). Reichheld’s work is known for its statistical significance and high correlation with business success. In 2006, the companies with the highest NPS were:

USAA (82%)

HomeBanc (81%)

Harley-Davidson (81%)

Costco (79%)

Amazon.com (73%)

Chick-fil-A (72%)

eBay (71%)

By 2008, Charlene Li and Josh Bernoff, in Groundswell, delivered research showing 80% of people rate and review products favorably on the internet and their social networks. If companies with an NPS of 80% rank among the highest in Reichheld’s work, Li and Bernoff’s research is particularly good news for businesses and brands.

It means companies that use interactive ratings are reviews are likely to have a higher NPS, be more admired and have greater profitability. Li and Bernoff’s research also showed:

76% of customers use online reviews to make purchases

96% of sites that have them say they are an effective merchandising tactic

Only 25% of e-commerce sites have them now

So, from Reichheld’s, Li’s and Bernoff’s viewpoints, we’re in the “net promoters era.” If your company isn’t taking advantage of it, shouldn’t it be?

I’m seeing a business principle take shape in social media called the “Goldilocks Rule.”

What happens is a business starts using a number of social networks (Twitter, Facebook, etc.). Maybe they use video or an app too. Pretty soon, one social networks starts working better than all the others. It’s the one that’s “just right” because it:

Attracts more people (fans, followers, viewers)

Increases sales most directly

While it’s not apparent at the outset what social network it will be, it is apparent, once it starts to happen, it’s the one that best reflects the uniqueness of the brand. Let’s look at a few examples.

1. BLENDTEC (BLENDERS): On YouTube, the blending of an iPhone has been watched by 8,002,192 viewers. Videos of CEO Tom Dickson blending golf balls and hockey pucks have over 1,000,000 viewers each. By contrast, Blendtec has 17,145 fans on Facebook and 2,266 followers on Twitter. For a product whose benefit needs to be seen to be believed, videos and YouTube are the medium for the message. For an investment of around $1,000, company sales increased +500%. And they still grow in direct proportion to YouTube viewership.

2. AJ BOMBERS (RESTAURANTS): Ask owner, Joe Sorge, what took his Milwaukee burger joint from $12,000/week to $17,000/week in sales and he’ll tell you Twitter, a video from Chris Brogan and great burgers. Numbers support this because the video on YouTube has 3,047 viewers and AJ Bomber’s Twitter page, which Joe uses like a virtual host, has 3,107 followers. By contrast, AJ Bomber’s Facebook page has 1,028 fans. Maybe that’s why Joe now has a book called #Twitterworks (http://twitterworks.tv) to go with the great food.

Both Tom and Joe’s videos are in previous blog.

3. COLGATE (CONSUMER GOODS): We put social media into Colgate’s marketing mix by creating a social media app for their promotions and events so friends could share Colgate news with friends. We put the app on their web site. It gives greater details on specific promotions and events and allows for sharing on over 20 social networks. We find 80% of response comes from Facebook. We also find the response rate is 4X industry norms and people spend 3X more time on the app than the web site. Since the average Facebook users has 130 friends, that’s a lot of people and involvement.

Facebook proved to be the best vehicles for conversations about Colgate brands. All of us like to talk about brands. Did you know we talk about brands on average a dozen times a day? Now, social media makes it easier for those conversations to occur and for us to learn from them.

So that’s the “Goldilocks Rule.” We see it for brands we observe. Do you see in your industry or brand?

The U.S. Small Business Administration is giving social media workshops at UCONN campuses this March and April.

52% of people in the U.S. work at businesses with 20 people or less. Small businesses have led the country out of every recession. Many believe, including comScore, social media will be a big asset this time around.

Since I’m one of them, I’m grateful to contribute along with Mike Rogers of Brainloaf, http://www.brainloaf.com and other small business owners (featured below) that have used social media successfully. Here are 7 social media tips to build brands.

Strategy trumps technology: A business strategy and social media strategy are the same thing. In using Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, apps etc., ask yourself how these amplify the business strategy and increase customer engagement and trust in your brand?

Set measurements and expectations first: Don’t believe anyone who says you can’t measure social media. You can know more about buying behaviors on the internet (e.g. where customers come from, how long they spend with you, what they do and where they go) than in your store. Plus Google Analytics and bit.ly links are free. If you’re not convinced, David Berkowitz has a great presentation on 100 measurements at: http://bit.ly/pmadb

Social media takes time: Small business owners, understandably, have lots of priorities. Manage what you can handle. Customers come first. Social media is going to be around for a while.

Live with the ups and downs: What you want is a following and fans. It doesn’t happen overnight. It doesn’t happen the way you thought it would, but, stick with it, and it does happen. Enjoy the journey.

Not all social networks are equal: In every case I’ve seen, some social networks do better than others depending on the unique nature of every business. For AJ Bombers, a burger joint, it was Twitter, acting as a virtual host, and a video from Chris Brogan. For a utilitarian product like Blendtec blenders, it was unconventional product demos from Founder/CEO, Tom Dickson. You can learn from their experiences below and expect it will happen for you.

Have your online house in order: If you follow tips 1-5, you will experience increased traffic. It will go to your web site, the most important asset in any social media program. There’s an old saying: Nothing kills a bad product faster than good advertising. Today, nothing kills a good social media program faster than a bad web site.

Believe in your product: Joe Sorge, owner of AJ Bombers, who now has a book, #Twitterworks (http://twitterworks.tv), spoke in a video call from Milwaukee. Joe says his Twitter page, AJBombers, has increased weekly sales +25%. What was most important to his success? “If I didn’t believe AJ Bombers made the best cheeseburger on the planet, social media wouldn’t have accomplished a thing.”

If you’re in the area, the next workshop is April 27th at UCONN in Stamford from 6pm to 9 pm. Details will be at: http://bit.ly/bW22Ml

I had the privilege of being on a radio show panel with some great people. The topic: “How Social Media Gains Trust and Advocacy in Marketing with Women.” Since women make 85% of buying decisions and are faster adopters of social media than men, it was a timely and interesting topic. The radio show was “Real Women on Health” and the panel was:

Kelley Connors, President of Real Women on Health!, a multi-channel community with a radio show, top-rated women’s health web site and significant affiliate partnerships

Tom H. C. Anderson, CEO of Anderson Analytics, a market research consultancy, and chairperson of LinkedIn’s most active networking group, Next Generation Market Research

Rob Petersen, President of BarnRaisers, an online marketing solutions company using social media and proven relationship marketing principles

Cassie Holm, National Strategic Alliance Director of Real Women on Health!, was the moderator

Everyone took the opportunity to learn from one another. Here are 10 tips to gain trust and advocacy with women using social media.

Invite in: Women are 3X less likely to care about the size of their network than men. Size may not matter but being shown personal attention does.

Understand who you’re talking to: 74% post pictures of family/friends and 71% talk about what they’re doing now as opposed to 60% and 58% for men. Take advantage of the opportunity and get to know them.

Listen and respond: Listening is a fundamental skill but, equally important, is proof you did.

Set guidelines and expectations: You can’t read body language on a social network. Security and privacy are big issues. Create a comfortable environment.

Be transparent: If you’re not part of the group and “trolling” for business purposes, you are very, very likely to be found out so be open about who you are.

Talk rather than target: When women are online, 50% are connecting with family and friends, reading someone else’s blog or posting a comment. They’re socializing so shouldn’t you?

Respect values: Dove ran a campaign on Facebook, “12 going on 20.” It asked young teens to describe what mattered when they were 5, 10 and 15 and how it influenced them today. It’s a great example of how social marketing showed respect for values.

Engage rather than sell: 60% or more are uploading picture or watching videos when online. Work as a co-creator, not a marketer.

Social media = social networking + social issues: It called “social” media for a reason. Make the most of both of them. Your audience will appreciate you did.

Give back – it’s part of the culture: You get back more when you give. That’s what we’re trying to do.

I’ve had clients tell me they’re from Missouri – you know, the “show me” state. I must work with people who’ve spent some time there because I hear the phrase, “show me,” a lot.

Here’s a recent experience of ours we’re glad to have done for a worthwhile cause. It shows us social media:

Works

Works even better when it’s integrated into the marketing mix

Is highly accountable

Builds brands

But that’s our opinion. What does this case study show you?

SOCIAL MEDIA BRINGS OUT ADVOCATES AND ROI FOR COLGATE/STARLIGHT FOUNDATION

SITUATION: Every February, Colgate Palmolive helps the Starlight Foundation, an organization dedicated to improving life for terminally ill children. They donate a Wii Fun Center every day to a deserving children’s hospital. Consumers vote at the Colgate website for their favorite children’s hospital to be recipients.

Awareness occurs through radio, major magazines, online advertising, PR and events, with the challenge to increase outreach, voting and participation every year.

SOLUTION: In 2010, social media is integrated in the marketing mix. A social media “app” is developed for the voting at http://colgate.com/showthelove. Through the “app,” consumers are able to: 1) Locate their favorite children’s hospital, 2) see who the daily winners are and 3) encourage their friends on social networks and relevant blogs to get involved. Recommendations are delivered with a branded “Show the Love” digital mnemonic (visual in the center above).

RESULTS: Social media outperforms outreach expectations, shows significant return on investment and plays an integral part in the program.

20% of consumers who vote also share on their social networks and blogs. For perspective, typical response rates for promotions on consumer packaged goods brands are less than 5%

They are on the social media “app” 3X longer than the web site

25% of total traffic comes from social media; mostly from Facebook

Total social media impressions compare favorably to mass media because the average Facebook user has 130 friends

If the differences between men and women are widely acknowledged in best-selling books, is it time to stop thinking about social media as a unisex voice?

It’s already well-known that women make 85% of the buying decisions in this country but did you know:

65% of people using social media are women

60% are boomer women

55+ is the fastest growing segment on Facebook

52% of searches women do are for someone else

85% are looking for an independent review by another woman

The numbers get even higher on the subject of health care where virtually all health care buying decisions are made by women, not just for themselves and their families but as caregivers to parents, relatives and extended family.

A woman named Kelley Connors is doing something about it. Kelley started an online community called Real Women on Health; http://realwomenonhealth.com a place for Baby Boomer women featuring candid conversations and expert commentary about health and wellness. Kelley started the community, after she learned from study after study, women who talk with other women about the same health interests or conditions actually have better outcomes.

As proof women want to share their collective wisdom in social media, in just a few months, Kelley has built a multi-channel community with over 10,000 members on her top-rated community web-site, blog-talk radio show, Facebook Fan Page, Twitter and LinkedIn accounts and received a content sponsorship grant from the National Women’s Health Resource Center, the largest clearing house for women’s health care information. When linked to affiliates partners, Real Women on Health reaches 5,000,000 women.

Kelley is using Real Women on Health for moderated conversations with advocates about health and wellness products and services this high value group really wants. She tries to listen with questions to her community like “what are the health topics you’re most passionate about?”

Listening skills are important because women believe they are misunderstood by:

59% of food marketers

66% in health care

77% in automotive

84% in investing

According to the Harvard Business Review, their primary sentiment with marketers is frustration. If you don’t believe me, ask the woman up top.

Do you believe marketers listen and understand you?

Listen to a live blog talk radio show, How Social Media Gains Trust and Advocacy in Marketing with Women, on March 9th at 6:30. Here’s your invitation from Kelley to join the conversation: http://bit.ly/aWOJwD