Thursday, February 16, 2012

My recently turned three-year-old is decidedly a big boy. He no longer wants sippy cups (less to wash!) or help with his hair and clothes. He wants to be a big kid like his siblings. He has even started enjoying Bible story time before bed. Because of his enthusiasm for story-time with the other kids, we have put aside our Bible geared for older kiddos and have pulled out the My First Bible Stories. He loves to talk about the pictures (especially the snakes and fiery furnace) and listens as we read. It is such a blessing to hear the older kids retell the stories to their littlest brother.

Last week, we read the story of Martha and Mary. This particular version of the story was very clear that Martha's tone of voice was less than appealing and even boarded on the nagging and complaining side. And this was not complaining with thanksgiving but just plain ol' feeling sorry for herself complaining. Martha whined about all of her work and lack of help. I retold the story with an exaggerated whine-and-cheese voice to really drive the point home.

We discussed how Martha was so busy whining, and doing, and complaining, and being busy with busyness, that she missed the pleasure of the Lord. The pleasure of His smile. His voice. His comforting hand on the top of her head. His joy at seeing her at His feet. She missed it.

I asked the kids how Mary might have felt, how Martha might have felt, and most importantly, how Jesus might have felt. Their replies included: sad, lonely, frustrated, confused. One of the kids thought Mary would feel satisfied because she would get to share in Martha's good meal AND have Jesus all to herself.

Another traitor, a.k.a my oldest daughter, pipes up, "Yeah, Mom, how come you never just sit?".

More conviction. Is this how they see me? Frustrated and whining about laundry, dishes, school, and all the other normal household stresses? Rushing here and there to complete a task with a grim line for a mouth?

"Did you leave your smile in your pocket, Mom" asks the 5 year old sweetheart. "No, darling. I'm just busy. And thinking. And busy thinking."

Is that what I want them to see in their mind's eye when I'm thought of? Is that what I want to teach as expected behavior?

Obviously, no. And, I will extend myself a little grace here. My personality is "Martha" all the way. I do things now and process them later. I find joy and fulfillment in serving others, doing for others, and ending a day with a crossed-off list. It's when the list was never touched or even written down that I become frustrated!

Moving forward . . . the Lord's use of a children's Bible story and my boldly spoken children to touch my heart was heard and felt. I've made a conscious effort to ask the Lord to clearly indicate where I need to stop and notice. Notice Him in the details of my day. Notice Him in the rare quiet fellowship of my children and even in their rambunctious laughter. To notice Him in the mess, the mess, the mess.

I am also asking Him to show me how He values me as a Martha and how to grow me more Mary-like. And I am ever so more thankful that He uses my children to convict me. Over and over again. Who knew God gave me children to keep me humble?!

O Christ, do not give me tasks equal to my powers,but give me powers equal to my tasks,for I want to be stretched by things too great for me.I want to grow through the greatness of my tasks,but I shall need your help for the growing.
E. Stanley Jones

Thursday, February 02, 2012

February! It's the month of love. Spring flowers began to peek up through the ground. Diamond dynasties and card companies create in our heads visions of ginormous rocks on a band, heart-shaped chocolates, and sappy but heart-felt sentiments from our loved ones. Our expectations of a over-the-top romantic Valentine's Day increase with each passing day.

As a teenager, Valentine's Day was the best day all year. Boys could buy their sweethearts a single rose and have it secretly delivered during the middle of Algebra II or Chemistry. All the girls would gush excitedly while secretly hoping their own beau would have their flower delivered during the next period. Please, oh please!

As I've gotten older, I tell my husband not to spend money on flowers and candy. I don't even need a card. Just let me sleep late. For a week. Serve our kids breakfast so I can linger in the shower. Alone and without an audience. Acts of service make my heart melt. If he does the dishes on a whim, my knees turn to jelly and I hear imaginary love birds chirping in my ear.

This February, a sweet friend challenged her Facebook friends to 14 Days of Valentines. It's a two week commitment to pray specifically for your husband. It's an encouragement to leave him small notes or gifts on a daily basis to completely fill up his love tank. I am completely charged by the challenge. In fact, since Weekend to Remember last year I have been praying very specifically for my husband. Below, are a few ways I am praying for him.

He acknowledges Jesus as the leader of his life by following and obeying Him, and relying on the Holy Spirit all day, every day (1Cor 16:13-14).

He take responsibility as the leader of his family, courageously leading me and our children (Eph 5:23).

He be a man of prayer, continuously in communication with the Lord so that he'll live and walk by His Spirit (1 Thess 5:17, Gal 5:25).

He have friendships with godly men that would "stir up one another to love and good works" (Hebrews 10:24).

He be shielded by God in mind, heart, and body, and be guarded from the evil one (Psalm 28:7, 2 Thess 3:3).

Sometimes, it's really hard to pray for my husband rather than about him (read here - complain about him). So, I become selfish and find one or two things to thank the Lord for regarding the man He gave me and call it "Done". Oh but don't worry. Those are the days the Holy Spirit wakes me at 3:00 a.m. with a conviction to pray for him.

And pray, I do. And will continue to do. And I even ask the Lord to prompt my sweet hubby to do a few more dishes and a little more laundry.