Whether you want to speak in public, open a new business, talk to potential dates, do stand-up comedy, climb a mountain — or anything you haven’t done before — you’re bound to feel fear and want help in overcoming fear.

Well, how do you do it?

After recording six albums of songs, my Band of Legends politely nudged me to perform live.

While I’ve spoken on stage numerous times over the decades, I never sang on stage.

Thinking about it brought up serious fears.

Even terror.

A friend remembers me saying I would NEVER sing in public.

I had to overcome panic attacks, anxiety ambushes, and near nervous breakdowns to overcome the fear of public speaking.

But public singing?

Forget it.

I didn’t even sing in the shower.

Childhood memories of being humiliated when I tried to speak or sing stayed with me.

I overcame the speaking one.

But I refused to even touch singing.

It felt too vulnerable.

I managed to do it in the studio for my six albums, by basically managing my adrenaline, but I couldn’t accept ever singing on stage live.

No way.

But I did it.

I did it!

And it was a huge success.

I was strong and confident, owned the stage, and led my Band of Legends into a triumphant performance.

It was a historic moment.

It was a personal breakthrough.

And it will live forever in my mind as a moment of greatness for me.

So, how did I go from terrified to terrific?

I’ll share my own process, as it will illustrate the art of overcoming fear. I’m sure you can be inspired by this adventure.

I of course did all the standard things that I teach, from practicing ho’oponopono (as I wrote about in my books, Zero Limits and AT Zero) to rehearsing in the studio and in my mind.

But two months before the show, I also —

I got coaching.

A basic rule of self-improvement is this:

You can accomplish more if you have someone who believes in you almost more than you believe in yourself.

I first saw that insight in the home of Jerry and Esther Hicks, of Abraham fame, decades ago. Jerry (who has passed on and I greatly miss) told me he first heard it in an early television western. I don’t recall the name of the show, but I do remember the impact the principle had on me.

I started Miracles Coaching more than a decade ago for that reason – to give people someone who could believe in them.

To help them overcome fear.

To help them attract miracles.

I’ve had a lot of people support me and coach me in performing:

Jen Sincero is a badass author of two NY Times bestselling books, You Are A Badass and the recent You Are A Badass at Making Money. I discovered her first book years ago, knew it would be a hit, and interviewed her. We stayed in touch.

I had lunch with Jen when she came to Austin for a book signing. I knew she had been in a band at one point, so I told her my dilemma. She told me that I had already done the hard part of singing.

“You sang for Melissa Etheridge,” she explained, referring to when I had a private songwriting lesson with the rock icon last November. “Singing one on one is harder than singing on stage, and you sang for an icon you idolize and adore.”

The last time I saw Melissa Etheridge, just for a moment after her show in San Antonio in June, she told me she loves my latest album, The Great Something.

She said to “Keep at it.”

I dedicated that album to her. There’s a song on it I wrote for her.

Her encouragement helped me stay motivated.

She once told me, “Feel the fear and do it anyway.”

Sarah McSweeney is a singer-songwriter who is on my first album, Blue Healer. She was the first person I sang for.

We met and she told me she always feels nervous before getting on stage. But she thinks of herself as a messenger, not a singer.

That reframe made the idea of singing easier.

“I am a messenger,” she said. “I focus on the song’s message.”

That insight helped me drop the idea of being a singer and adopt the idea of being a messenger. It helped me relax a little.

Meghan Sandau is a new friend. She has promoted big music events. She wanted to see me do a concert. She said she likes my music.

Her belief in me helped make me more secure.

In fact, none of this would happen without her.

She set up the event for my Band of Legends to perform.

She held my hand and encouraged me.

Meghan also suggested I do an energy clearing session with Nicole Pigeault of Los Angeles. I love energy work and do clearings for others so I leaped at the chance to hire Nicole.

Turned out to be one of the most powerful esoteric washes ever.

The hour session helped me release fears and settle into confidence.

But she wasn’t the only person to support me.

Guitar Monk Mathew Dixon has been coaching me for years now. We’ve made numerous instrumental albums together, such as Invoking Divinity.

He stayed in my corner, listening to me rehearse, listening to me confide my fears, and urging me to hang in there.

Then there’s Patrick Stark in Canada. He’s a filmmaker making a movie about overcoming fear.

It’s called “One Life: No Regrets.”

He interviewed me for it. He plans to sing on stage with the band U2. But it will be the first time he’ll sing on stage EVER.

Imagine it.

The first time you sing in public anywhere is on stage with U2 and thousands watching.

Well, if Patrick can drum up that kind of courage, then so can I.

Right?

I found preparing for the event mainly a battle with my mind. Most of my thinking was negative. It was all, What if it goes bad?

But Mindy Audlin came to visit. She teaches what if up thinking.

She wrote the book What If it All Goes Right?

She coached me in other ways to think: what if it is a breeze? What if I love it?

It also helps to see people successful in one field try their hand in a completely different field.

James Altucher tried stand-up-comedy. He’s a writer. He’s doing something out of his comfort zone.

But he’s willing to do it for the experience, and he’s sharing his learning curve to inspire others.

Though I haven’t met him, knowing he was stepping out beyond his fear fortified me to do it, too.

Of course, my beautiful Nerissa (above) believed in me, too.

She and I practiced “The Remembering Process” that Daniel Barrett taught me: we talked about the live show as if it had happened in the past and we were remembering how great it went. (See the book Daniel and I wrote: The Remembering Process.)

So the first thing I did was gather people who could coach and inspire me.

Next –

I got educated.

To prepare for my show, I attended an online Masterclass with David Mamet, and another with Usher.

Both were astoundingly good.

My band of legends: me, Daniel Barrett, Glenn Fugunaga, Joe Vitale

Mamet is a Pulitzer prize-winning playwright and screenwriter. I think he is a genius.

He said most people are afraid to be bad to be good.

You have to be bad first to start being good.

You have to start someplace.

I reminded myself of this as I prepared for the live event.

While I wanted to step out on stage and be “perfect,” Mamet reminded me that I will probably step out and be bad.

But bad is where you start. You can’t get to great without starting at bad.

Usher said to prepare, to be confident, but to expect something to go wrong.

Don’t expect perfection.

He told a story of a performance where he injured himself at the beginning of a two-hour show, and had to keep dancing and singing despite the pain.

His insights and pointers were priceless in helping me create a mindset for success.

And I bought a set of audios called The Relaxed Musician. It’s a 14-day course in exploring limiting beliefs.

It helped me realize I had a big belief that if I looked bad as a performer, it would hurt my reputation in other areas, such as an author or speaker.

But like most beliefs, it didn’t hold up.

I could forget all my lyrics and totally wash out on stage and it wouldn’t even dent my image anywhere else. Most people forgive and forget.

In fact, a miss on stage could give me a terrific story about how I bombed and lived.

But I didn’t stop there.

I read a terrific book on how to deliver an unforgettable live performance. I liked the book so much, I read it twice.

It was called, The Musician’s Guide to a Great Live Performance.

It became my bible. I read it on planes, took it with me on my iPad, and shared it with singer-songwriter friends.

And I read a wonderful book on overcoming fear and panic, titled You 1, Anxiety 0.

Author Jodi Aman helped take the mask off of fear so I could see what it really was: an illusion. I soaked up the wisdom in this book. It really helped me.

I also read a 1950 book by Vernon Howard called Word Power.

It was about how you talk to yourself, as well as to others, effects your behavior and your results. It’s not so much affirmations but self-talk.

Pretending you are fearless by saying “I am a fearless performer” is a way to begin being a fearless performer.

And I read a recent book, called Succeed.

It explained that just visualizing success is a plan for failure unless you also visualize planning for setbacks.

In other words, thinking the show will go without a flaw is not realistic, as Usher pointed out. There is no such thing as perfection.

But visualizing success, and understanding there is work to do to get there, can almost guarantee the result you want.

That was a mind-spinning insight.

I did more, too.

The Townsend even had a special drink for the live show

I got Nevillized.

With Meghan’s urging, I wrote out a script of how I wanted the show to go.

I focused on my feelings, not anyone else’s, so I could focus on what I could control.

The script was a type of Nevillizing (which I write about in my book, The Attractor Factor): feeling as if the event already happened, and happened the way I envisioned it.

I didn’t visualize the show happening, I visualized that the show already happened.

Big difference.

I wrote the script from the point of view of the next day, after I performed on stage.

I read and re-read it every day for a week before the show.

And —

I got relaxed.

I got massages, I got plenty of rest, I drank lots of water, and I went into a flotation tank at The Zero Gravity Institute for 90 minutes the day before the show.

I was doing whatever I could to be at peak form when I stepped on stage.

I was taking care of my body and mind.

I was getting ready for my moment.

I got faith.

Faith doesn’t always mean something religious.

Faith in yourself, faith in other people, faith in my practice and prep, faith in my Band of Legends – all of it gives a level of confidence that allows the best to surface.

As a slogan I coined says, “It is what you accept.”

I accepted that the moment would be perfect, even in any imperfections.

It would be “perfectly imperfect.”

I let go.

I trusted.

And, after two months of preparing, what happened?

My Band of Legends and myself performed on July 21st at The Townsend in Austin.

The big mistake most people make when it comes to using the Law of Attraction – or using anything to achieve their goals and dreams – is wanting to know how.

“How do I make it happen?”

“What are the exact steps I should take?”

“How do I get from here to there?”

The thing is, you rarely if ever know how in advance.

Once you complete a goal and can hold it in your hand, or show it off to friends, you can explain the how of it.

You’ll then have a complete beginning-middle-ending story.

The puzzle will be revealed.

You can then explain the steps you took.

But not before you attract it.

Recently I surveyed my list, asking what book they would like to see me write next. While virtually everybody wanted more books like Zero Limits and AT Zero on ho’oponopono, a few wrote in some suggestions.

Those people were usually wanting to know how to attract something specifically, and how I did it.

They wanted stories of people revealing exactly how they attracted their goals.

They were asking for step-by-step plans.

This is the big mistake.

Let me explain:

When I was making a name for myself as a copywriter and marketer back in the 1990s, a lot of things occurred that I couldn’t predict, let alone know how to make happen.

For example, the Internet came along.

Who saw that coming?

I was one of the first to be online already – on what were called Bulletin Board Systems (a kind of miniature, local only, limited reach Internet) – so when the actual Internet was born, I was already there.

The speaking and writing I was doing in Houston, where I lived at the time, now being posted on CompuServe and AOL, broadcast my name across planet Earth.

It helped make me cyber-famous.

It was certainly an essential step in my career.

But I never saw it coming.

It was never on my to-do list.

How could it be?

Are you starting to see how this works?

During these same early years, I wrote a little book called Spiritual Marketing.

I released it online, free, and it touched millions of lives.

I never knew it would do anything. I released it to the world in the hope that it would help people.

But The New York Times wrote about it.

And Bob Proctor urged me to publish the book.

And it became an early print-on-demand book.

It was also my first Amazon bestseller.

But I wasn’t following a “how to make it happen” plan.

No such plan existed.

These synchronistic events were happening as a side result of my passion and persistence.

They were happening organically.

They were happening on the way to my dream.

I couldn’t predict them because I couldn’t see them.

They were on the unseen road ahead, to be discovered as I kept moving forward.

And along the way in this adventure a publisher contacted me. He later published my book, Spiritual Marketing, but with a new title: The Attractor Factor.

That became the most powerful and popular self-help book I’ve ever written.

And The Attractor Factor was given to a television producer in Australia. She read it and contacted me.

She said she wanted me to be in a movie she was making about the Law of Attraction.

It was to be called The Secret.

That movie changed my life.

It put me on Larry King’s television show, twice, and got me invited to speak in countries I didn’t know existed.

How do you make those things happen?

After all, none of them could have been foreseen.

When people ask for the step-by-step exact plan to make something happen, they are making the mistake of thinking there is such a plan.

There isn’t.

There is a general formula, but not a specific one.

There are formulas for helping you choose your intention, start taking action, and maintain momentum once you get going.

But there isn’t a specific “do this and then do this” plan.

Even Mark Twain knew it.

Twain said, on his 70th birthday, “You can’t reach old age by another man’s road. My habits protect my life but they would assassinate you.”

Thinking you can copy the specific things I did in my life to attract and achieve specific results in your life is a big mistake.

Thinking there is a “how” to get where you want to go is an error.

You attract the results you want with the formulas I have revealed, in books like The Attractor Factor, Attract Money Now, and most recently in The Miracle.

Other self-help authors have other formulas.

Mine goes something like this:

Declare your intention or inspiration.

Take the first baby step to begin moving toward your goal.

Keep taking action on all next steps and new opportunities.

Surround yourself with positive people and messages.

Clear any limiting beliefs as you notice them.

You’ll notice there isn’t a specific task that will work for you and everybody else.

There isn’t because there’s no way to know it in advance.

Steve Jobs knew this, too.

Jobs once said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.”

Stephen Oliver said (used with his permission) “I just received my copy of your new CD, “The Great Something”. As soon as I got into my home office (I’m a freelance writer), I put it on the stereo. I’m listening to it as I write. Now I’m in a quandary. I can’t decide whether it’s incredible or ‘merely’ fantastic. Either way, I love it. I’ve already added it to my night time playlist, along with all your other CDs.”

And Jimbo Berkey said (used with his permission) “After listening to your newest album, “The Great Something,” I am convinced that it is the most powerful and compelling message that anyone who hasn’t begun this journey could ever encounter.” (Jimbo went on to buy 20 more copies of the CD to give out to people.)

Let me explain how you can use self-help songs like the ones on The Great Something in your life:

“The Hook”

When you are facing a situation where someone or something is about to “set you off,” take a breath. The self-help song “The Hook” (on my One More Day album) contains the message “Don’t Take the Hook!” It’s a reminder that you don’t have to take the bait. In general, whenever you get upset, it’s when you went unconscious. Something or someone flipped your internal switch and you got mad or sad. The song “Don’t Take the Hook” is your reminder that you have choice; you don’t have to get engaged or outraged. You can always walk away. You can even walk away singing, “Don’t take the hook!”

“The Glad Game”

But if you do take the hook and find yourself upset, you can always play The Glad Game to recover. I wrote this self-help song because of the famous book, and many movie adaptations of it, called Pollyanna. “The Glad Game” (on The Great Something album) is your reminder that you can find the good in any situation or person. You may have to really look. But it’s always there. Always. This upbeat swing-rock-dance song will show you the way.

“Look for the Light”

One way to find the good, or play The Glad Game, is to “Look For the Light.” This self-help song, also on The Great Something album, is a reminder that there is light (or good, or glad, or positive) in any and every situation. This song was born when someone asked me how to handle political fighting and opinion conflicts that split people. I spontaneously said, “Look for the light.” There are always people doing good things, and good causes you can find and support. But you may need to pause and look for it.

“Empowerment”

You’ll find yet another way to use lyrics as affirmations in my self-help song “Empowerment” on my album The Healing Song. This instrumental cried out for my voice, so I allowed inspiration to guide me in speaking hypnotic commands of inner strength. Listening to this track alone can strengthen your mental core, so you can have, do, or be, whatever you imagine and work toward. I listen to this song every time it shuffles up on my playlist. It’s powerful.

“There’ll Be Days”

After my private songwriting lesson with rock legend Melissa Etheridge, all of my music became more focused. The self-help song “There’ll Be Days” (also on my latest album, The Great Something) is my favorite song for conveying wisdom in a traditional singer-songwriter folk format. It’s a reminder that some days will be tough, and some will be tender, but you can get through them all if you smile and remember this song. I know it doesn’t sound humble at all, but I think this song is pure genius. At least I can’t stop listening to it. It’s hauntingly beautiful.

“The Great Something”

When you need reminded that you aren’t alone, and that the dark night of the soul will pass, you might listen to “The Great Something” (the title track on The Great Something album). This self-help song was directly inspired by my lesson with Melissa Etheridge. She advised me to write in the first person. I took her advice to heart and wrote the most personal, raw, and revealing song of my life so far. I listened to it earlier today to remind myself that “The Great Something” – what others might call Divine, Universe, Nature, Gaia or something else – is with you always.

“Some Thoughts”

Everybody has thoughts, but not everybody knows they are not their thoughts. The self-help song “Some Thoughts,” on my One More Day album, is an upbeat tune reminding you that some thoughts serve you and some thoughts suck. But you can play the jukebox in your mind and just select a different song/thought at any time.

“You Gotta”

The self-help song “You Gotta” (on my album titled Sun Will Rise) is a pep-talk in song. With saxophone, guitar and an upbeat drum (by the drummer with the same name as me), this one is designed to urge you to get up, get moving, and move toward your dreams. “You gotta dream, dare, grow and go” is an affirmation and command. After all, any dream you want to attract requires movement from you, as life is a co-creation.

“Everybody’s Going thru Something”

The most popular music video I ever had created is the one made to breathe life into the self-help song, “Everybody’s Going thru Something” (on my very first album, Strut!). I wrote this song to remind us that we all have dreams and we all have pains. If we can be more understanding, we can bring more peace to the world. (See the music video at the end of this post.)

“Remember”

The smokey-bluesy-jazzie self-help song “Remember” (on the album Reflection) is a hypnotic-poetic ballad revealing the creativity technique I used to make numerous albums. The technique is called The Remembering Process and Daniel Barrett, my producer, and I wrote a book explaining it called, naturally enough, The Remembering Process. With baritone saxophone and a smooth groove, this spoken word song offers you another way to enjoy creativity. For some reason I want to say this song is really hip.

If this intrigues you, please see All Healing Music, the portal for almost all of my healing music (many recorded with Guitar Monk Mathew Dixon) and self-help songs (all recorded with my band of legends: Daniel Barrett, drummer Joe Vitale, Glenn Fukunaga).

I’m going to share a hot off the press story with you here. Then we can look at how to apply the principles in it to your life.

Ready?

I just finished recording my sixth singer-songwriter album. It’s called The Great Something.

I dedicated my new singer-songwriter album to the great Melissa Etheridge

While the previous five albums all reveal a musician growing in confidence and ability, each one better than the last, this latest one broke all boundaries.

The songs are better than ever.

The singing is hands down the best ever.

The music is stellar, going from swing to ballad to rock to (as my drummer put it) “improvised symphony of genius.”

Why is this album so much better than all the others?

What happened?

I used everything I teach about self-help, goal-setting, and manifestation to create this album; from setting a clear intention to gathering my band of legends, to taking action on the ideas and opportunities that arose as I moved toward the recording date.

Singing my heart out

While all these elements are part of what make The Law of Attraction work in your favor, clearly the biggest turning point for me was attracting my private two-hour songwriting lesson with rock icon Melissa Etheridge.

I’ve already written four blog posts about my time with her. (See PS below for links to those “Attracting Melissa Etheridge” articles.) I won’t repeat myself (much) here, but I openly declare that my time with Melissa deeply influenced this entire album.

In fact, I’ve dedicated it to her.

Let me explain:

First, I used some of her music dynamics to create new songs.

The song “Melissa Said” is, as my producer called it, “The greatest thank you card of all time.” It’s an original song I wrote for Melissa, using some of the arrangements she shared with me about making music. My band got goose bumps listening to my homage to Melissa. It is stellar. It is three minutes of gratitude. (Wait till Melissa hears it!)

Second, the title track song was directly influenced by my time with Melissa.

While Melissa was too wise to tell me what to do, her feedback helped me learn lessons for myself. It was the Socratic method. Socrates didn’t give you the answer. He helped you think of it on your own. Being with Melissa helped me realize the title track song (and the album) needed to be called The Great Something, my phrase for God or the Divine. (It was originally going to be called The Miracle.) That insight redirected the entire album.

Third, and more importantly, Melissa urged me to write from the first person.

“The Great Something,” the title track song, is raw. It’s from my view of life, my hard times, and my discovery of The Great Something. The band was blown away with the power and depth of it. It is riveting. It is revealing. That is a direct result of taking to heart what Melissa told me about writing in the first person.

Fourth, when I was with Melissa, I shared the opening lines of a song that had come to me in my sleep.

Melissa liked what she heard. Because of that, I felt encouraged to complete the song. I did. It is the most hauntingly beautiful thing I’ve ever penned. It’s called “Hey You,” and it’s designed to heal any hurting heart. Guitar Monk Mathew Dixon added his sweet guitar on it and it is deliciously healing.

Guitar Monk Mathew Dixon

Fifth, Melissa taught me to feel my message when I sang.

As a result, my singing on a singer-songwriter ballad I wrote was, as my producer called it, “Sinatra-est.” It was probably the highest compliment he could give me. My voice compared even remotely to Frank Sinatra’s was enough to make me speechless. I just followed what Melissa taught me and felt the song as I sang it.

With Melissa Etheridge (!)

Obviously, I absorbed Melissa’s wisdom and vibe and infused it into this new album.

Footer Menu

Latest News

*Please be advised that due to the nature of the products which Hypnotic Marketing Inc. (“HMI”) and Joe Vitale are selling, there is no possibility of substantiating any claimed results made or supplying any objective evidence, whether financial, business related, spiritual or otherwise.
Full Disclosure Notice, Legal Notice, and Privacy statement can be read by clicking on the links below this statement.