Patience is the ability to tolerate or delay your frustration without gettingangry, upset or agitated about it. It is your capacity to manage your emotions when faced with negative outcomes and proceed calmly. In Latin, “pati”means to suffer, to endure or to bear.

In today’s world of technological advancement, life has become very fast and everyone wants an immediate output or result. In view of this, most of the things have become instant like instant food, instant photo, instant home or personal loan, and many more; it seems that the term PATIENCE is losing its significance in our daily lives. The tendency of instant gratification has made direct impact in our efforts, perseverance and dedication towards achieving the goal. Any delay in achieving the desired goal creates a feeling of frustration and failure in our minds. We need to revive the feeling of patience in order to achieve the true goal of our lives.

It’s true that we all lose patience at some point of time, but it is always desirable to maintain a high level of patience despite amount of difficulty in our lives. Losing patience not only hurts us but it affects our relationships with people around us. There are many unfavorable events, persons and their behavior which raises our anxiety level and compel us to lose our patience. We need to analyze such trigger points in our daily lives and try to find the solution of them.Well, there are certain steps and points, when followed properly can help you in finding the solution and increasing the patience level. These are as follows:

(1) Delegate your tasks

You may be handling too many tasks simultaneously in a short span of time. Any mistake or delaying in the task makes you impatient. For example, you are doing too many time bound tasks single handedly or without assistance, like getting ready in the morning for the office, preparing food for the family members and at the same time making your children ready for the school. All the things are to be done in time so that you & your children can reach office and school in time respectively. What will be your reaction if any of the following events occur?

The gas cylinder gets empty in between of cooking results in half baked food

There is no water in the tap or the geyser is not working

You miss your last bus for office or your child misses the school bus

Your probable reaction in any of the above mentioned circumstances is nervousness and losing patience. The only solution to this problem is delegation of tasks to others like hiring a maid for preparing food. Even if you are encountered with multiple tasks, then focus on the task in hand and try to complete that task with efficiency. After the completion of that task you will feel relaxed, your anxiety will reduce and you will be charged and motivated to handle another task in line.

(2) Slow down

Another reason of losing patience is the mismatch in level of understanding between two people. For example, you are teaching your child but s/he is slow in understanding the things. You get frustrated after some point of time, lose control and starts scolding. You should try to reduce your pace of teaching with her/his level of understanding. Try to enrich her/his learning process with examples, letting her/him understand the things in a better way.

(3) It is sometimes necessary to make an excuse

There may be people around you whose behavior induces anxiety in your mind and any longer communication with them may result in losing your patience level. For example, a person around you gets irritated often on trivial issues and her/his behavior creates an uncomfortable atmosphere that makes you restless. The best way is to find an excuse to relocate you to other location and get engaged in another task. This will help you in maintaining your peace of mind.

(4) Delay your gratification

The desire of instant gratification is the reason behind your anxiety and restlessness. You feel that acquiring certain thing or product can give pleasure and you become desperate to feel that pleasure right now. Any delay in psychological pleasure creates a feeling of anxiety and tension in your mind and you start losing patience. The example of instant gratification could be as follows:

You want iphone6 or another LED TV although you already have a smart phone

You are tempted to watch a movie in spite of your exam the very next day

The above examples create a temptation of unnecessary demand and the feelings in your mind. Try to condition your mind to delay the gratification by putting off the rewards in the future date. It has been found that people who delay their gratification are found to be far more successful and persistent in their efforts towards reaching the goal than those people with the feeling of instant gratification. Practice delaying your gratification, may be you don’t need these tempting object right now and you can save good sum of money for your future needs.

(5) Always think before speaking

When someone screams at you, the most common reaction is retaliating with more abusive words; this increases the intensity of the situation and both the parties end up losing their patience level which further deteriorates the consequences of the situation. I am not saying that one should not react but one should first think and then speak. This practice will help you in understanding the situation in better way with wider perspective and you can respond more effectively while maintaining your level of patience.

(6) Practice deep breathing and concentrate on it

​During any negative outcome, your body gets tense and may have any of the following symptoms:

Fast breath

Sweating

Shivering

Tension

Anxiety

Irritation

Whenever you feel impatient, take deep and slow breaths and concentrate on the process of breathing. This activity will slow down your heart rate, relaxes your body and eases tension. This will also help you in taking right action in the difficult situation.

(7) Remember great things take time to shape

One should have the virtue of patience because all great things take time to develop like Rome was not built in a day. It requires your time and persistent efforts in order to achieve them. The following are the examples of achievement with time:

Having a baby

Becoming a successful entrepreneur

Becoming a professional like Doctor or Engineer

Getting over tragedy

(8) Focus on what matters the most

We generally lose patience and start fighting over trivial things, if you change your focus from these trivial issues towards what matters most in your life then you will be more at peace. Also, remember that life is not a sprint race but a multi-dimensional journey where you should enjoy each and every step.

Relationships and the peace of mind matters the most than the material things

Health should take a front seat than acquiring money

Contentment should be practiced to replace the feeling of greed

Faithfulness should be your virtue than deceiving

Having a positive outlook for life than getting frustrated over minor issues

(9) Be ready to expect the unexpected

When you plan something and it does not go as per your expectations, you get anxious and feel restless. The mismatch between your expectation and the actual outcome is the reason of restlessness and losing patience. Most of the things happen in life which is not expected; therefore it is necessary to condition your mind to gracefully accept the unexpected things. The right conditioning of mind to expect the unexpected will raise your patience level.

(10) Take regular breaks

​Giving yourself break on regular basis gives you strength to withstand the difficulties of life and helps in rejuvenating your patience level. Always spare some time to get yourself away from the worldly affairs. For example, plan a holiday to beautiful location or often read good book or sometimes do nothing. It is similar to having a healthy food whenever you feel hungry; likewise when you feel exhausted, try to revive it through above mentioned activities.

Benefits of Patience

It helps in reducing stress: When you practice patience on regular basis, you are able to control your emotions in an effective manner and you face the difficult situations calmly. This makes you happier person in longer run.Better decision making: As you are taking charge of your emotions, you will be in better position to make right decisions. You can decide the things impartially that is good for everybody and helps in becoming a good leader.Develop understanding, empathy and compassion: When you are patient you are more inclined towards listening the problems of others and understanding it in a better manner. You are in position to understand the situation with wider perspective and effective enough to come out with right solution. Your patient approach will nurture long lasting and fulfilling relationships with your spouse, children, parents, friends and people around you.Now, you start appreciating the process of growth like growing of your child, sprouting of plant from seed and other miracles of nature.

Conclusion

Patience is a virtue which everyone must practice to have a fulfilling and successful life. Losing of patience may result in failure and damaged relationships. Patience changes your thinking process and your attitude towards other people which helps you in recognizing the problem with wider perspective. Idleness breeds impatience and restlessness, therefore one should keep oneself engaged in the constructive activities. Kindly do not get impatient with trivial matter, it will not solve problem rather escalates it. Try to be patient as it creates a comfortable atmosphere for everyone.The book, Patience: The Art of Peaceful Living by Allon Lokos, has received nice reviews from the customers.