PURE: Finally, My First Casual Hookup!

What’s your gender? WomanHow old are you? 23What’s your race/ethnicity? Hispanic / Latino/aWhat continent do you live on? North AmericaWhat country and/or city do you live in? USAHighest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)What’s your current relationship status? SingleWhat’s your sexual orientation? HeterosexualAny other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? demisexualHow many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

PURE: Finally, my first casual hookup!

How long ago did this hookup happen? last month

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Fuck-buddies / Booty call

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I was really nervous walking to the bar because his picture on Pure was just a selfie. He had pale skin, a full trimmed beard and thick hair, and blue eyes. Not the type I usually go for . . . I was worried I wouldn’t want to hook up with him. But as I walked up to meet him on the street, I saw a tall, broad-shouldered, well-dressed figure. This I could work with! And when he came in to hug me hello,I saw a kindness in his eyes made me feel safe.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We talked on Pure briefly and decided to meet at a coffee shop nearby. We had a nice talk and didn’t verbally say that we both wanted to hook up, but it was implied, so we made our way over to his place.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He knew beforehand that I didn’t want to have penetrative sex and was very understanding about it. It was both of our first times using Pure and possibly doing hookups that casual too, so we began with an awkward kiss but were quickly all over each other. When he finally reached down my jeans and slid a finger between my wet pussy lips, I let out a huge moan.
He kissed his way down my body and finally licked my pussy which felt great. Eventually I started feeling his mustache hairs pricking my clit, which wasn’t so nice. But his tongue was very skilled. Eventually he got tired and we switched to 69. I was worried because he wasn’t as hard as the other guys I’ve been with. It made me nervous he wasn’t into it. But then he had this awesome, aggressive moment where he threw me off his body and flipped me over and started fingering me. It was this awesome angle and after a few minutes of that he made me come. After that we 69’d some more, but he hadn’t come which was making me nervous. He guided me to what he wanted but I just wasn’t used to a guy not loving my blowjobs so I was kind of distracted. Eventually he flipped me over and started rubbing his cock on my pussy, which was still wet and really turned me on. I guess that did it for him because a few minutes later he finished in my mouth.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? Well . . . we parted ways, but he texted me a little later in the night and I asked if he wanted to keep hanging out. We ended up hooking up again and I slept at his place. In the morning it seemed like he wanted to get coffee or something but I was feeling weird about the whole thing at that point and just went home. We’ve hooked up since though and will probably keep seeing each other just for that because I think he’s nice and chill and I think likes hooking up with me?

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, I was feeling lonely, Boredom, It was easy / convenient

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I only mentioned it in passing to a couple friends. One was really proud of me, the other didn’t really react.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I felt totally comfortable and I could tell he wanted to please me.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? The kissing could’ve used some work. It also kinda stressed me out to realize again how little I’m physically attracted to people I don’t know that well. I was more into the whole thing because he was into me.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I was extremely happy to experience a positive, safe, suuuper casual hookup. I’d been worried I wouldn’t find that. Since this hookup I’ve been internally debating with myself as to whether or not it’s ok to hook up with someone who you’re not physically attracted to (but probably would be if I were to get to know him). I discovered demisexuality in the past few years and think it applies to me because although I have a very high libido, I’ve only ever been turned on by someone’s body and the pleasure I give them if I have some kind of connection with them.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I’d never done casual sex before, but had wanted to. I’m very conflicted about the whole thing, because I think the biggest issue in any relationship/hookup/interaction is communication. I also had an experience with sexual assault in the past and really believe that if we didn’t go about sex so nonchalantly, I may not have gone through it. While casual sex is possible and good, I worry that in some instances it can cause ignorant/bad people to shirk things like consent and the fact that they’re dealing with another human being.