Pine Nuts: Peeking behind the Taliban Curtain

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INCLINE VILLAGE, Nev. - The Iron Curtain was fairly easy to peek behind before it was pulled down entirely with the Berlin Wall in 1990. The Taliban Curtain on the other hand is more ethereal and consequently more difficult to peek behind. But let's try.

What is the defining force that drives Taliban hatred of America? Religion? Nope. Politics? Nope. Ideology? Nope. The defining force that drives Taliban hatred of America is a force more powerful even than all of the above combined ... the blamed sex drive.

As this is a delicate matter to discuss in a family journal I shall choose my words carefully, in fact, I shall ask a few rhetorical questions in order to draw a curtain in front of the curtain we are trying to peek behind. I admit this journalistic approach to getting at the truth of a matter has never worked before and is likely to misfire here, but let us try...

Imagine you are a devoted jihadist, true to your wife during the fighting season, hoping to live to see her again, but all the while comforted in knowing if you do not live to see her again at least you have 16 special maidens waiting on the other side of martyrdom.

Now stay with me, suppose the mountain passes are clogged with snow and you go home for the winter to discover that your wife has taken a job with Apple and has moved to China. How are you going to feel? You are going to blame America and start looking forward to the next fighting season and those 16 special maidens.

Moving right along, what do you think is the one thing that an educated, liberated American woman controls unequivocally? That's right. Take THAT away from the jihadist and we've got a problem my friend, right here in Taliban City.

Yes, the jihadist's devotion to casting aspersion upon America hangs on one thing, and that one thing is protected and preserved by his religion, his culture and his history. It is so deeply inbred that when a 14 year old girl professes openly that she wants to be educated and take control of her life, a Taliban jihadist can feel compelled to shoot her in a school bus.

Next question. Who led this jihadist to the wrong side of history? If you answer "his religion" you are warming to the Socratic irony of the real answer - his mother.

So what about Mom? The jihadist's wife cannot say no to her husband, that's a given. But she could say no to her son's aspiration to be like Dad, and yes to her daughter's desire to be educated. These yeses and nos have to be whispered to escape the wrath of getting stoned, and I don't mean stoned as in Haight-Ashbury.

The whispers of mothers carry a velvet force of persuasion that is formidable. When mothers of young potential jihadists discover their whisper power and unleash that power, they will vouchsafe a peaceful and natural end to this particular jihad in one short generation. (In full disclosure, I have been waiting 1,000 columns for an opportunity to use the word "vouchsafe" and it has finally arrived.)

One last question and we'll let you go. Do they celebrate Mother's Day in the land of the jihad? Because until they do, we are going to have Taliban jihadists gathering together in cells around the world wanting to bring down a country that honors mothers, women, and 14 year old girls with a thirst for education and liberty.

Yes sweet mother of that young potential jihadist son, it is up to you. And yes sweet mother of that young potential college bound daughter, it is up to you. The world is watching...