A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, to be confronted bya well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

'Good morning,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

''Go away!'' said the old lady. ''I'm broke and haven't got any money!'' and she proceeded to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open...''Don't be too hasty!'' he said. ''Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.''

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet."Now if this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said, "Well let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning."

A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down. A lady cashier walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open."Not a phrase that men normally use, he went on his way looking a bit puzzled. When he was about done shopping, a man came up and said, "Your fly is open." He zipped up and finished his shopping.At the checkout, he intentionally got in the line where the lady was that told him about his "barracks door." He was planning to have a little fun with her, so when he reached the counter he said, "When you saw my barracks door open, did you see a Marine standing in thereat attention?The lady (naturally smarter than the man) thought for a moment and said, "No, no I didn't! All I saw was a disabled veteran sitting on acouple of old duffel bags."