What life lessons should kids learn before reaching adulthood?

These days well-schooled children with involved parents are whizzes when it comes to solving the toughest algebra equations, writing persuasive essays, winning video games, even creating documentary films. But do they know how to handle failure? Or how to be kind?Or how to deal with change? These can be the most important skills yet often the hardest to learn. What life lessons—as in choose your battles wisely—should all children learn before they reach adulthood? Please share in the comments.

Life lessons: What you carry in your backpack doesn’t matter. What you do with the stuff in your backpack does matter. (Getty)

On the social networking site LinkedIn, I recently stumbled upon an article about important life lessons all children need to learn. Joel Peterson, the Chairman of the Board at JetBlue Airways, writes about how children need to learn how to find the good in themselves and build habits. Peterson thoughtfully writes about those “skills” that you don’t necessarily learn from textbooks in school.

What’s more, the father of seven makes the point that these lessons are often the most difficult to learn because as parents we can’t tell our children that they need to work hard and expect them to soak up this wisdom. Rather these lessons are learned through experience and as a parent you can make an impact by guiding them through these milestones or by setting a good example.

How you respond when your child forgets to bring his homework to school in third grade has an impact on his future. If you drive all the way back home to grab it for him, he’s going to forget that homework again and again. In life, he’s going to expect someone to pick up the pieces for him when things go wrong. If you say, “Tough,” you’ll have to deal with an angry teacher and a bad grade today, he might not ever forget that homework again.

I’d love for readers to share in the comments what life lessons they think are most important for children to learn. For some inspiration here are three examples from Peterson’s story.

Take yourself out of the center. The most miserable people I know live in a self-designed universe that revolves eternally around them. To keep their planets aligned, they desperately amass power, money, or fame – but their supernova usually ends up a black hole. One way to avoid this is by helping those less fortunate than you. As Helen Keller said, “There is no better way to thank God for your sight than by giving a helping hand to someone in the dark.”

Embrace reality. President John Adams said, “Facts are stubborn things.” You can’t change reality, so you need to face it head on. It might sound crazy, but you should seek out bad news – the earlier you find it, the earlier you can do something about it before it gets worse. Look for problems and become the solution. Nothing good ever comes of avoiding the hard truths.

“Solve” for the long term. It’s crucial to be deliberate about your life. One way to approach this is to ask yourself: What am I solving for? Pleasure is short-lived. Even happiness is dependent on circumstances, and temporary. But joy – or deeper satisfaction – is rooted in meaning. Joy lives beyond the moment and despite present circumstances; and it can be conjured when needed. Peace is the ultimate resolution of a life well lived. It derives from finding a oneness with a purpose outside of yourself. In your own life make peace the quest that trumps the constant allure of pleasure.

Let’s keep this list going. Please share your life lessons in the comments.