Christina Aguilera Has Purple Hair Now

While all her contemporaries spend their summers fitting into bikinis – including Lindsay Lohan who’s 5/8ths freckle-hobbit – here’s Christina Aguilera in the strongest Spanx money can buy while promoting The Voice over the weekend because apparently she’s still on the show. Somehow scaring the shit out of Adam Levine while simultaneously wasting precious man-hours trying to invent camera angles that defy the laws of physics must translate to ratings, I don’t even pretend to understand television. Then again, Honey Boo Boo should’ve probably driven it home by now that there’s not even a science to it anymore. Just fucking film anything, doesn’t matter.