In F&T meeting today, three little kids said essentially the same thing: "I know the church is true. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God and that Thomas S. Monson is a prophet of God." Even a girl who's leaving on a mission used that same pattern. Is this something that the testimony glove is teaching, or what?

Are you folks using "bare" for "bear" on purpose? I hope so because it's completely hilarious. Every time I see it I have visions of some sexy young thing (male OR female) doing a striptease and telling about Joseph's fantasy. AND, it seems like something Joseph might just have enjoyed if he'd thought about it.

I'm using "bare" instead of "bear" because with all of the adults, it's like they're laying bare their weaknesses when they bear their testimonies. Almost always, they're sharing stories about how they didn't have enough faith or strength or how they were natural men etc.

The bishop here nods his head in agreement every time anyone says those magic words in giving a testimony! BTW I never used them. TSCC is not true, JS and Monson are not prophets. My one regret is not being permitted to give that true testimony. Wait, can I? After I resigned am I now allowed to speak? If we can, some fast Sunday we should.

It's possible that it could've been mentioned in simply a ward level, e.g. a fireside or a primary lesson, rather than the general authorities sending out a letter, writing an Ensign article or giving a conference talk about it.

That said, I also heard about it long before. Occasionally in some wards you get phases where each testimony meeting is dominated by relief society sisters giving massive 20 minute speeches about some emotional event that happened to them during the previous months. When that happens, the Bishop usually tries to subtly stop this happening by arranging for someone to give a talk about how to bear a testimony or whatever.

Every missionary knows to avoid bringing investigators in on the first Sunday of the month.

A few of my favorite 'testimony' rants.

'Black people like to drive with their windows down in the summer. White people have them rolled up with the AC on. I usually drive with my windows up, but sometimes I put them down because those black people may be onto something...'

'I was inactive for several years. I had 11 piercings. My little sister was crying one day because I wouldn't be able to be with heavenly father. I went up to my room, took all the piercings out except for one, and was suddenly overcome with the spirit...I know GBH is a prophet....'

'I have a testimony of food storage. When I left my wife, my wife and daughter were able to live off of the stored food until she could find a job. Otherwise they probably would have had to go on government assistance or something...'

About 3 years ago I was ready to leave the cult but was still working with TBM DH toward that end. Every TM I would listen very carefully to check who really testified of JS being the profit\seer. Very few do anymore...primary and old sisters mostly. I'm in the very center of the USA so we have old converts and Moridor know-it-alls. We had an ubber TbBM Moridor couple move in and I noticed he wasn't bearing his testimony. I had him pegged as a nom. A year or so ago he became the Bishop so every 3 months he has to testify. So far he has never said the church is true or that Joe was a profit. Lots of fast footwork ending with Christ is his savior which is odd in mormondumb. I often catch teachers saying some factoid that came straight from here or other internet source......that is so sweet.

It's been the core of the testimony is to make those kinds of claims of beliefs as in "I know." There are times when someone in the bishopric usually will caution people that it's not time for a travel log, but for personal experiences of their faith.

When I was a missionary, we had an investigator that we made promise she would come to church. She was an older lady, in her late 60s or early 70s and had led a bit of a wild life. As it ended up she needed a shot of courage to come so she drank a fair amount of something and showed up at Fast and Testimony meeting and was moved by the spirit and got up and bore her testimony of the Church in a slurred drawl ...using the three point formula she heard the kids using as quoted above ( this was in 1978) the members were both appalled and delighted ....