Couples praise fall of DOMA

Updated 11:48 am, Thursday, June 27, 2013

They've had a ceremony where they declared their partnership together. They've had a civil union. They were married under Connecticut law in 2008.

"By now, we've had so many ceremonies, we celebrate the day we met -- Sept. 7, 1979," Mustich said Wednesday.

So by now, the couple has a right to a little impatience in the decision by the U.S. Supreme Court in throwing out the federal Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman.

"All we can say is, `What took them so long?' " Cornet said at the couple's home in Washington, Conn., on Wednesday.

Joe Mustich, 54, left and Ken Cornet, 67 just after their wedding ceremony at the Bryan Memorial Town Hall in Washington, Nov 12, 2008, the first day of legal gay marriage in the state of Connecticut.

Joe Mustich, 54, left and Ken Cornet, 67 just after their wedding ceremony at the Bryan Memorial Town Hall in Washington, Nov 12, 2008, the first day of legal gay marriage in the state of Connecticut.

Photo: Carol Kaliff

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John Lewis, second from right, and his partner Stuart Gaffney celebrate after the Supreme Court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California at the office of San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee at City Hall in San Francisco, Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. less

John Lewis, second from right, and his partner Stuart Gaffney celebrate after the Supreme Court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California at the office of San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee at City Hall in ... more

Photo: Jeff Chiu, Associated Press

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A couple celebrates upon hearing the U.S. Supreme Court has struck down the Defense of Marriage Act at City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court ruled on DOMA, and will rule on California's Prop 8 as well. less

A couple celebrates upon hearing the U.S. Supreme Court has struck down the Defense of Marriage Act at City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court ruled on DOMA, and will rule on ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom speaks during a rally after hearing results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom speaks during a rally after hearing results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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American University students Sharon Burk (left) and Mollie Wagoner (right) embrace after hearing that the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional at the Supreme Court, June 26, 2013 in Washington, DC. The high court ruled to strike down DOMA and determined the California's proposition 8 ban on same-sex marriage was not properly before them, declining to overturn the lower court's striking down of the law. less

American University students Sharon Burk (left) and Mollie Wagoner (right) embrace after hearing that the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional at the Supreme ... more

Photo: Mark Wilson, Getty Images

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Michael Knaapen, left, and his husband John Becker, right, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013, after the court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California by holding that defenders of California's gay marriage ban did not have the right to appeal lower court rulings striking down the ban. less

Michael Knaapen, left, and his husband John Becker, right, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013, after the court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California by ... more

Photo: Charles Dharapak, Associated Press

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Glennda Testone (center) Executive Director of the The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center June 26, 2013 celebrates with staff after the US Supreme Court case challenging the "Defense of Marriage Act" that prohibits federal recognition of gay marriage. The US Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a controversial federal law that defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman, in a major victory for supporters of same-sex marriage. less

Glennda Testone (center) Executive Director of the The Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center June 26, 2013 celebrates with staff after the US Supreme Court case challenging the "Defense of ... more

Photo: Timothy Clary, AFP/Getty Images

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Julia Tate, left, kisses her wife, Lisa McMillin, as they read results of Supreme Court decisions regarding gay rights on Wednesday, June 26, 2013, in Nashville, Tenn. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. McMillin holds the couple's son, Luke. less

Julia Tate, left, kisses her wife, Lisa McMillin, as they read results of Supreme Court decisions regarding gay rights on Wednesday, June 26, 2013, in Nashville, Tenn. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in ... more

Photo: Mark Humphrey, Associated Press

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Same-sex couple Sue Rochman (left) and Robin Romdalvik (right) stand with their son Maddox Rochman-Romdalvik as they await the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

Same-sex couple Sue Rochman (left) and Robin Romdalvik (right) stand with their son Maddox Rochman-Romdalvik as they await the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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Same-sex couple Sue Rochman (center) and Robin Romdalvik (right) with their son Maddox Rochman-Romdalvik celebrate upon hearing the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

Same-sex couple Sue Rochman (center) and Robin Romdalvik (right) with their son Maddox Rochman-Romdalvik celebrate upon hearing the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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Sue Rochman, left, and Robin Romdalvik kiss, reacting to the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling on gay marriage in California, at San Francisco's City Hall on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The couple is accompanied by their son Maddox Rochman-Romdalvik. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. less

Sue Rochman, left, and Robin Romdalvik kiss, reacting to the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling on gay marriage in California, at San Francisco's City Hall on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The couple is accompanied by ... more

Photo: Noah Berger, Associated Press

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California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom speaks during a rally after hearing results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

California Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom speaks during a rally after hearing results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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Same-sex couple Lori Bilella (center) and Renara Moreira (R) await results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

Same-sex couple Lori Bilella (center) and Renara Moreira (R) await results from the U.S. Supreme Court's rulings on gay marriage in City Hall June 26, 2013 in San Francisco, United States. The high court struck ... more

Photo: Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

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Tina Reynolds celebrates the Supreme Court decision at the LGBT Sacramento Community Center on Wednesday, June 26, 2013 in Sacramento, Calif. The Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a provision of a U.S. law denying federal benefits to married gay couples and cleared the way for the resumption of same-sex marriage in the state of California. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. less

Tina Reynolds celebrates the Supreme Court decision at the LGBT Sacramento Community Center on Wednesday, June 26, 2013 in Sacramento, Calif. The Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a provision of a U.S. ... more

Photo: Hector Amezcua, Associated Press

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American University students Sharon Burk, left, and Molly Wagner, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013, after the court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California by holding that defenders of California's gay marriage ban did not have the right to appeal lower court rulings striking down the ban. less

American University students Sharon Burk, left, and Molly Wagner, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013, after the court cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California ... more

Photo: Charles Dharapak, Associated Press

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John Lewis, left, and his partner Stuart Gaffney embrace as they react next to Andrea Shorter after the Supreme Court decision at the office of San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee at City Hall in San Francisco, Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a provision of a U.S. law denying federal benefits to married gay couples and cleared the way for the resumption of same-sex marriage in the state of California. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. less

John Lewis, left, and his partner Stuart Gaffney embrace as they react next to Andrea Shorter after the Supreme Court decision at the office of San Francisco Mayor Ed Lee at City Hall in San Francisco, ... more

Photo: Jeff Chiu, Associated Press

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Brandon Benoit (center) hugs Martha Acevedo (L), 25, and Briana Castaneda, 23, as they celebrate the Supreme Court ruling at a watch party at Equality California, a non-profit civil rights organization that advocates for the rights of LGBT people in California, on June 26, 2013 in West Hollywood, California. The high court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and ruled that supporters of California's ban on gay marriage, Proposition 8, could not defend it before the Supreme Court. less

Brandon Benoit (center) hugs Martha Acevedo (L), 25, and Briana Castaneda, 23, as they celebrate the Supreme Court ruling at a watch party at Equality California, a non-profit civil rights organization that ... more

Photo: Kevork Djansezian, Getty Images

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Michael Knaapen, left, and his husband John Becker, right, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013 after the court struck down a federal provision denying benefits to legally married gay couples. less

Michael Knaapen, left, and his husband John Becker, right, embrace outside the Supreme Court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013 after the court struck down a federal provision denying benefits to legally ... more

Photo: Charles Dharapak, Associated Press

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After delivering coffee to visitors to waiting to enter the Supreme Court, SCOTUS Blog interns check their smartphones for updates on the latest news as outside the court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013, as the justices are expected to hand down major rulings on two gay marriage cases that could impact same-sex couples across the country. From left to right are Dan Stein, Max Mallory, and Andrew Hamm. less

After delivering coffee to visitors to waiting to enter the Supreme Court, SCOTUS Blog interns check their smartphones for updates on the latest news as outside the court in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, ... more

Photo: J. Scott Applewhite

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Michael Knaapen (left) and his husband John Becker react outside the US Supreme Court in Washington DC on June 26, 2013. The US Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a controversial federal law that defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman, in a major victory for supporters of same-sex marriage.The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) had denied married gay and lesbian couples in the United States the same rights and benefits that straight couples have long taken for granted. less

Michael Knaapen (left) and his husband John Becker react outside the US Supreme Court in Washington DC on June 26, 2013. The US Supreme Court on Wednesday struck down a controversial federal law that defines ... more

Photo: Mladen Antonov, AFP/Getty Images

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Nikolas Lemos waves a rainbow flag outside San Francisco's City Hall shortly before a Supreme Court ruling cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The justices issued two 5-4 rulings in their final session of the term. One decision wiped away part of a federal anti-gay marriage law that has kept legally married same-sex couples from receiving tax, health and pension benefits. The other was a technical legal ruling that said nothing at all about same-sex marriage, but left in place a trial court's declaration that California's Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. less

Nikolas Lemos waves a rainbow flag outside San Francisco's City Hall shortly before a Supreme Court ruling cleared the way for same-sex marriage in California on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. The justices issued ... more

Gay rights activist Bryce Romero, who works for the Human Rights Campaign, offers an enthusiastic high-five to visitors getting in line to enter the Supreme Court on a day when justices are expected to hand down major rulings on two gay marriage cases that could impact same-sex couples across the country, in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Gay rights activist Bryce Romero, who works for the Human Rights Campaign, offers an enthusiastic high-five to visitors getting in line to enter the Supreme Court on a day when justices are expected to hand ... more

Photo: J. Scott Applewhite

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Gay rights advocate Vin Testa waves a rainbow flag in front of the Supreme Court at sun up in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Justices are expected to hand down major rulings on two gay marriage cases that could impact same-sex couples across the country. One is a challenge to California's voter-enacted ban on same-sex marriage. The other is a challenge to a provision of federal law that prevents legally married gay couples from receiving a range of tax, health and pension benefits. less

Gay rights advocate Vin Testa waves a rainbow flag in front of the Supreme Court at sun up in Washington, Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Justices are expected to hand down major rulings on two gay marriage cases ... more

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home ... more

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home ... more

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home ... more

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Ken Cornet, 71, left, and Joe Mustich, 59, have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home ... more

Joe Mustich, 59, right, and Ken Cornet, 71, toast the Supreme Court's decision regarding the Defense of Marriage Act. The two have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were legally married in 2008. They are photographed in their Washington, Conn. home Wednesday, June 26, 2013. less

Joe Mustich, 59, right, and Ken Cornet, 71, toast the Supreme Court's decision regarding the Defense of Marriage Act. The two have been together since 1979. They entered into a Civil Union in 2005 and were ... more

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, relax on a hammock outside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled Wednesday in a 5-4 decision to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. less

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, relax on a hammock outside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The ... more

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, pose for a photo at their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled Wednesday in a 5-4 decision to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. less

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, pose for a photo at their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. ... more

From left, Aidan, 11, Harry, 11, Deb Neumayer, Robin Howell, Emily, 13, and Tommy, 1, pose for a photo inside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled Wednesday in a 5-4 decision to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. less

From left, Aidan, 11, Harry, 11, Deb Neumayer, Robin Howell, Emily, 13, and Tommy, 1, pose for a photo inside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together ... more

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, laugh inside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. Supreme Court ruled Wednesday in a 5-4 decision to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act, which defined marriage as between a man and a woman. less

Robin Howell, left, and Deb Neumayer, laugh inside their home in Danbury, Conn. on Wednesday, June 26, 2013. Howell and Neumayer have been together for 25 years and married for five years. The U.S. Supreme ... more

NeJame said the city of Danbury thinks itself a culturally diverse community. As a teacher, she said, she wants to foster that diversity.

The court's 5-4 decision won praise from a host of Connecticut politicians, including Gov. Dannel P. Malloy.

"The Supreme Court today reaffirmed the core principles of our country -- that all people are created equal and have the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness," Malloy said.

Malloy pointed out that Connecticut has recognized same-sex marriages since 2008, but that the federal law the court overturned Wednesday kept those couples from being recognized by the U.S. government and denied them rights afforded to all other married couples.

"Having two different sets of laws for people based solely on their gender, race, religion, sexual orientation, or gender identity is wrong," Malloy said.

The court's decision had its critics, as well.

Cardinal Timothy Dolan of New York and Archbishop Salvatore Cordileone of San Francisco issued a joint statement calling it a "tragic day" for marriage and the United States.

"The Supreme Court has dealt a profound injustice to the American people by striking down in part the federal Defense of Marriage Act," Dolan and Cordileone said. "The Court got it wrong. The federal government ought to respect the truth that marriage is the union of one man and one woman, even where states fail to do so."

Maddox said the decision was especially welcome after the court's 5-4 decision Tuesday that invalidated key measures of the Voting Rights Act.

"Given the membership of this particular Supreme Court, I wasn't sure of anything," Maddox said. "I can't believe they got it right."

The court's decision in the second case involving same-sex marriage -- the Proposition 8 case in California -- made California the 13th state in the United States where same-sex marriages are sanctioned. The District of Columbia does as well.

But Maddox said that means there's still a majority of states where same-sex marriage isn't recognized.

"We still have a lot of work to do," she said.

In Washington, Mustich and Cornet are justices of the peace, and perform marriage ceremonies for straight and same-sex couples.

Mustich said that while marriages are joyous occasions, he also sees the inequalities that exist.

"You can get married in Connecticut," Mustich said. "But you go back home and it's not recognized."

Robin Howell, of Danbury, was, at first, nearly speechless, when trying to describe the impact of the court's decision.

"We were equal in the eye of Connecticut, but not in the eyes of the federal government," Howell said. "It's a big difference. I don't really think we can understand all the implications today."

Howell said it's good at this moment to remember all the grassroots work, and all the politicians who took controversial stands, to make it happen.

But Howell said the work toward having people recognized for who they are, regardless of any label, has to be carried on in schools and homes.