This Needs To Happen

I like to think that I don’t ask a lot of you, the reader. I try to put out a collection of fun, educational, and entertaining pieces about things of interest to me several times a week for your literary pleasure. In return I ask for a couple comments and emails (I would like to point out that I’m still oh-for-life on chest shots emailed to me) and occasionally for you to spread the good word if you like what you find here, but that’s about it. That all changes today…

This goes out to the folks to the great state up north and those who spent and/or spend time cheering for the University of Wisconsin. If you haven’t heard, the Badgers have recently accepted the transfer of star NC State quarterback Russell Wilson to their football team. This kid is not Cam Newton, meaning he doesn’t guarantee the Badgers a Big Ten title let alone a National Championship but he’s pretty darn good and will ensure we’re in contention for the first if not both crowns.

The fact that Wilson chose the Badgers (over the defending champion Auburn Tigers no less – who are lacking a QB as well) matters not. It’s great, he’ll be fun to watch, and this ensures the Badgers will be good next fall when they may be the only form of football worth noting on the weekends. What is important is what we’re going to call this kid (stay with me here).

Every sports star needs a nickname (that’s not entirely true but the payoff is worth it) and there’s a perfectly good nickname sitting out there for the taking. So let Chi-Guy.com become the place that kicks off the official campaign to welcome Russell “Honey Badger” Wilson to Madison. “Honey Badger” you ask? Damn straight Honey Badger. Watch. Learn. Spread the word. That’s all I ask…

This is going to work, just remember where you heard it first. Russell “Honey Badger” Wilson don’t take no shit from nobody.

By virtue of mere happenstance, under the auspice of a Thomas Hardy-like novel, I stumbled upon your rather odd scrip, banally entitled, “Chi-Guy”.

So, onto the burdensome task before us, sans Kosher descriptive muses harboring breads and circuses best left to more redactive literary critters.

I suggest a cursive appraisal of signs and signifiers, thematic context/continuity, voice, and overall consequence to said readership. One generally assumes such basic command; others require a moment of awakening from their deep slumbers.

Caution: If you have not already satiated the need for proper guidance, please turn your attention to the front of the aircraft, self-medicate as needed, and enjoy your flight.

General observations – The tacit style employed reads of forced stream of consciousness, subjugating the unwilling to your literary masturbation. An audience with no personal connectivity will infer “I” statements, suggestions, and stock observations with the same enthusiasm of having their gums kneaded with barbed wire followed with a mouth cleansing of kerosene; this bears the near-likeness of a solo coach transatlantic flight nestled between the awestruck Progressive traveling for inspiration and the lonesome (and homely) divorcee who has yet to express his/her/it (gender unbiased here) unleashed epiphanies. Good times.

I digress – The speed by which we process information attentively and thereby retain formative knowledge has been lulled into a false sense of assurance.

These ruminations do not “wax poetic” for the simplicity which was sought by Thoreau. The real dichotomy is apparent here on as would be on many other sites, albeit, of a different strain.

The overall lack of any one persons’ ability to sustain fully considered ideas appears to be deficient, not from poor education as much as a cultural tapestry that has pierced the general mindset.

We exist in a menagerie of super nova proportion, exploding all around us, with little time to contemplate the true significance. Hence, a convenient pretext, on your behalf.

About About – Such self aggrandizing replete in “ . . . a daily dose of Intelligencia grade enlightenment. . . and those who stand in line behind me, order at the table next to mine, and fill the casting call for extras in the world that I live.” Please, invoke Freud …………………now!

Might I suggest some touch points on your culinary pairings (ask for permission first! Expensive tidings, yet well worth to those who truly appreciate savoring): Wine starters, for the uninitiated on reds, a fine beginning is the 2003 Chambertin Clos de Beze and if a white is needed to ease the entry point, I might suggest the 2004 Chateau d Yquem. Personally, I prefer the complexity of a Meritage, and forego that a 2005 Chateau Bellevue is ill suited for sharing straight from the bottle.

A scotch best served neat, the 1973 Glenlivet Collection. Whiskey that would reawaken my granddaddy, the Jameson Rarest Vintage Reserve, and to satisfy The Wife or the wife (which is thematically inconsistent here) given her penchant for vodka, soda, and lime, a Beluga Gold Line Russian or ANY of the 2005 Kauffmann Vintage blends; neither to be found at your local watering hole.

Side note: eggs benedict is rarely clever, even while riddled with the finest caviar or Creoled (sic) in a sloppy essence. Please refrain from harboring the notion of “sloppy” in your mind for too long.

I do hope you are enjoying this mirror of self examination. Let us continue the lesson.

On turning “a tríocha” (30) – And so? The blanket – stock nature characterization portrayed is pitiful and ruinous to all that is literature-should one consider the “Chi-Guy.Com” of literary merit. . .Ad nauseam, please add “The Wife/wife”, all sports references/articles, wax poetic of days gone by-with high disregard in former drinking exploits, veiled sexual nuances, humor where none is to be found, and the general malaise of the current state. Not to mention the inability to resolve a penchant for the herb. . .see Canadian customs reference. Ouch, that unwittingly stuck out.

Thirty is a marked awakening where the evolved part with the selfishness and disembark for an embracing of the selflessness. Choose. The Human Condition reconciles little for us. No regrets. Either one seeks solace in empty musings or stares dumbly at the sun, hopeful that clarity arrives.

Absolute dichotomy – Let Go My Burgeoning Aneurism. The soothsayer senses an ambitious UW Madison transplant from the cushy suburbs that craved a singular path where privilege and the new autonomy struggled.

The Liberal nature of Madison afforded fresh pleasantries which fell short of expectation. The practicality of the dollar ran head into the want of an “emotocon” that reflected a creative visionary who could cut his teeth on more ingenious adventures. Hence, a turn toward the Chicago-scene to live, write, love/loss/love, experience.

Recurring validation on a path you have set in concrete pars the semblance of passivity yearning for an intellectual existence that reigns supreme. Thoreau, and the Transcendentals as a whole, fell short on ambition. As Brutus was ambitious, ye befall a similar fate until you resolve the kindled intent of said musings.

Afterword – The truly gifted men of letters have lived and lost. I sense much given, little earned, and yet, scantily content. Embrace what is immediate, contemplate, and enjoy.

For soon enough, “I lingered round them, under that benign sky; watched the moths fluttering among the heath and hare-bells; listened to the soft wind breathing through the grass; and wondered how anyone could ever imagine unquiet slumbers for the sleepers in that quiet earth.”

Pax Romana

Post Script – - This authentic stream covers from inception through June 16, 2011…more to come. Where did that lovely bottle go?

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