Strident ‘Ex-Gay’ Activist Anthony Falzarano is Dead

Anthony Falzarano, the shrill “ex-gay” activist who founded Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays (PFOX) and once derisively referred to hate crime victim Matthew Shepard as a “predator to heterosexual men” has died. A staunch proponent of spiritual warfare, Falzarano once told CBS News, “AIDS comes from the devil, directly from Satan. He uses homosexuals as pawns and then he kills them.”

The Palm Beach County Medical Examiner’s Office confirmed to us this morning that they indeed had an Anthony Falzarano there in their morgue. Since Anthony and his wife, Dianne, are the only ones listed there by that name, we are taking this as confirmation that this is the same Anthony Falzarano who has participated in ex-gay and anti-gay activities since the 1990′s.

Prior to his “transformation” he claimed to be a former prostitute and the late Roy Cohn’s houseboy. Falzarano’s entry into the “ex-gay” scene in the early 80′s has always been a little murky. In one version of his tale, God told Falzarano to go straight before the AIDS crises hit. In another version, after many of his friends had passed away, God told him to become “ex-gay.” In yet a third version, one of his sexual conquests felt guilty after their encounter and introduced him to Christ. Obviously, these colorful versions are contradictions and they can’t all be true.

(Box Turtle Bulletin has more on this aspect of his life. And for the complete story, please get my book, Anything But Straight)

Falzarano put the bite in soundbite and was media friendly, clever, and opportunistic. In 1998, he started the wretched organization PFOX with an $80,000 grant from the virulently anti-gay lobby group the Family Research Council. This is the same year that 15 religious right organizations unveiled the high-profile $600,000 “Truth in Love” campaign. Falzarano regularly appeared at Family Research Council press conferences and in the media during this tumultuous time period when the “ex-gay” industry was in its heyday. Falzarano also told me that he was one of Dr. Robert Spitzer’s subjects in his recently renounced study.

Falzarano departed PFOX after a bitter dispute with the religious right. In a media conference at the National Press Club, he claimed that conservative political groups who sponsored a high-profile 1998 ad campaign, had no use for “ex-gay” organizations other than for public relations purposes.

“Many of us in the ex-gay movement feel we are being used,” said Falzarano. “The [anti-gay coalition] is not coming close to the needs of homosexuals. We did that very successful newspaper campaign last year…the Christian Coalition did not send us a dime. All we’re asking for is possibly some money to pay for postage stamps.”

Falzarano was kicked out of PFOX and at one point refused to vacate the group’s office, which led to a stand off. Eventually he departed and started a rival organization, Parents and Friends Ministries. However, the group quickly hit a snag when it tried to host a three day “Healing for the Homosexual” conference at The Catholic University of America. The school cancelled the event after the university said that Falzarano applied for use of school facilities under “false pretenses.”

According to the Washington Times, CUA spokesman Victor Nakas said Falzarano misrepresented the intent of the conference in newspaper ads–giving the impression it would deal with ministering to victims of child abuse – when he signed the contract.

“We do not rent space when people come to us under false pretenses,” Nakas said in the Times article. “When we found out the purpose of the conference was different than he had applied for, we contacted him on May 17. We do not rent space to people who misrepresent themselves. If the conference had been described to us as it was in the ad, it’d be a completely different story.”

More recently, Falzarano moved to West Palm Beach and authored, Such Were Some of You: One Man’s Walk Out of the Gay Lifestyle. The book had little impact and few people paid attention to it, as Falzarano limped into slow anonymity, save the occasional nasty comment left on LGBT blogs.

Over the years, I personally got to know Falzarano. In my view, he was a very likable guy and I enjoyed his sense of humor. Unfortunately, he also had a crazy side and was severely truth challenged. His most frequent lie was claiming that people became homosexuals because they were molested as children.

My favorite story: I visited his office in late 1999 to ask him a few questions about PFOX. He practically dropped to his knees and begged me to come with him to Jerusalem for the millennium so we could be closer to God when the world ended. He was a bit embarrassed the next time I saw him, which was on earth, not in heaven as he swore would be the case.

While we had a few civil conversations behind the scenes, we sparred in the media. At the 1:03 mark of the video you can catch a younger version of me battling Falzrano on the Roseanne Show, as you can hear him yelling “you lie” as I speak:

The last time I saw Falzarano was in 2011 at the Values Voter Summit in Washington, DC although he did not notice me because he was preoccupied in deep prayer. There were many aspects of Anthony Falzarano that I liked, and others that I loathed. I hope he rests in peace and that God, if he exists, isn’t too harsh on this man for his habitual destructive lies directed at innocent LGBT people. However, at the end of the day, I forgive Falzarano. He was simply a little bit nuts and could not help himself with the fibs. His dishonesty and inability to tell the truth defined him as a human being far more than his false claim to be a “former homosexual” ever would.

About the Author

Wayne Besen is the Founding Executive Director of Truth Wins Out and author of “Anything But Straight: Unmasking the Scandals and Lies Behind the Ex-Gay Myth” (Haworth, 2003). In 2010, Besen was awarded the “Visionary Award” at the Out Music Awards for organizing the American Prayer Hour, an event which shined a spotlight on the role American evangelicals played in the introduction of Uganda’s Anti-Homosexuality Bill.

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31 Comments

Even though I banned many of Anthony Falzarano’s comments at this site due to his breaches of standard netiquette, I liked him more than the ex-gay activists of Exodus and Focus on the Family because he bluntly said what he meant. He didn’t craft elaborate, elliptical, and ultimately meaningless soundbites for consumption (and carefully planned misinterpretation) by megachurch pastors and their philanthropists.

Falzarano did not seem to question his unfounded delusions, and he simply ignored questions by media and blog commenters about his obvious mistakes and self-contradictions. That made it impossible for him to gain an audience among those who require two-way conversation as a sign of good faith.

I find it sad that Falzarano anchored his religious beliefs and his personal interactions in delusion and anger over his own personal history, which Falzarano stubbornly (and wrongly) assumed was shared by most other gay people.

Wayne Besen, why do you now say that you liked Falzorano? Is it because you wish to wish to use such false praise as “evidence” that you would not say terrible things about Greg Quinlan or wish harm on him?

You are a schemer, Wayne Besen, but we can all see what is going on. You never liked Falzorano but now that he has gone to be with the Lord, you will use him to promote your book and to help you in your lawsuit against a godly man who has conquered the demon of homosexuality.

Why don’t you publish the legal response papers of Quinlan? Let the truth win out and show us these papers! Has he not sued you back for many lies and transgressions?

I am shocked to be reading this. I knew Antony and Dianne (and Mary)a lifetime ago when I was working with Exodus Internaional. I’m grateful that I was able to cover from the ex-gay lies but I am saddened to read this story. Wayne, when I read your book I knew many of the charaters about whom you wrote including Anthony.
He was completely nutty–he would break into broadway musicals without warning during serious conversations. Last time I saw him was at a Courage meeting in Manhattan in 1991–oh! Joseph Nicolossi was also there.
My prayer are with the family. Life must have been interesting while he was around, I’m sure things will be tough for Dianne and Mary.

DevinApril 24, 2012 at 3:01 pm -

Oh no, Charles Be Maranatha is back. I have to ask myself, what is it he loves so much about this site? His devotion to Greg Q. is highly suspect. I mean, are they partners or something? Why else would this weird guy deign to show up here to defend his boyfriend Greg if it were not something deeply pathological?

@ Charles. What a miserable old f*ck you are. You are not worthy to even speak G-d’s name never mind presuming to speak in his name!!
This is a sad event; how dare you turn this into an opportunity to spew your vile all over the readers here. There are several passages in the Bible to tell us how to recognise a true Christian—YOU FAIL!
You better watch your mouth because you will be judged by the very words you put out from it!

Because it is boring legalese. Quinlan’s law team is trying to dismiss the lawsuit claiming that he can lie about me and smear my name because I am allegedly a public figure. A judge will decide if the case will move forward, because that is how the legal system works.

Quinlan has not counter-sued, because it would be frivolous and utterly idiotic.

Charles, how do you even know about the case? Could you actually be Quinlan? Please, be a man of God and reveal the relationship. Otherwise you are a phony and a fraud.

P.S. I’d take Falzarano over Quinlan any day. He was nutty, but fun. Quinlan appears to be a very angry guy.

PJB863April 24, 2012 at 3:36 pm -

Have any of the moderators ever thought of tracing Charles’ URL?

Michael BarberApril 24, 2012 at 3:47 pm -

Charles B, you are as nutty as the rest of the retards that have atrophied brains on Jeebus. Please go back to your pew and STFU. Don’t try selling us fags any crazy, we’re all stocked up.

JessicaApril 24, 2012 at 3:58 pm -

I am almost sure that Charles B is Greg Quinlan’s sock puppet.
Hey Charlie boy, how big is this True Church you attend? How come no one else from this church ever defends Mr Quinlan? What is your relationship with Mr Quinlan?
Sock puppet, pound to a pile of horse muck.
Mr Besen, I didn’t know it was possible to slander someone and get away with it because they are in the public eye. If Mr Quinlan is telling the truth he shouldn’t hide behind this, he should stand up and defend himself.

Priya LynnApril 24, 2012 at 4:05 pm -

Charles, you claimed your god wouldn’t allow Wayne’s lawsuit to be filed but it was anyway – why did you lie?

RainbowPhoenixApril 24, 2012 at 4:21 pm -

Falzarano I can at least pity unlike so many of his colleagues. He came off as a genuinely sick man who got suckered before he could get the help he really needed.

I am not Quinlan. I have never even met Quinlan. And I have never EVER wanted to be with a man. My marriage is to a woman based on the teachings of the Holy Bible. So I am not ex-gay. However I heard a powerful sermon on the Exodus movement and so I defend the ex-gay Quinlan when he is attacked by powers and principalities.

I am an authentic Christian, a member of the body of Christ and a congregant at the true church. It is my Biblical obligation to try to warn sinners like Wayne Besen, Evan Hurst, and John Becker that they are drowning in the muck and slime of sin. I am trying to help you!

Finally, Quinlan has said that he will sue you back if you sued him. So you can look forward to that in the future. Perhaps he is waiting for the judge to dismiss your suit first and then he will sue you back. Before this happens, you should meet with him, apologize, atone for your many lies, and seek forgiveness. In the name of the Holy Spirit, I instruct you to do this at once.

RainbowPhoenixApril 24, 2012 at 4:38 pm -

True christians don’t hate people Chucky.

lgbt meApril 24, 2012 at 5:38 pm -

“I am trying to help you” Don’t you get it – we neither want nor need your help.

justmeApril 24, 2012 at 5:54 pm -

“You are a schemer, Wayne Besen…”

Damn, Wayne, you’re so lucky. I’ve waited all my life for some bitchy old queen to use a line like that on me and still no go. You have now arrived!

justmeApril 24, 2012 at 5:55 pm -

“And I have never EVER wanted to be with a man.”

There’s your problem right there.

You’re welcome.

MerlynApril 24, 2012 at 8:44 pm -

Charles B., you are not in a position to tell anyone anything, despite your Pentecostal delusion that since you are filled with the Holy Spirit the world has to obey you. No one gives a crap what you think so you are merely wasting bandwith posting here.

@ Charles B Are you seriously saying that you do not understand how someone can oppose someone else’s politics — even stridently — and not like them as a person? If that is what you are saying then I strongly suggest a long course of treatments, until you can see the many colors in our non-black and white world.

Kind thoughts,

Reyn

EddyApril 25, 2012 at 10:39 pm -

Checked out Falzarano’s facebook page. He apparantley is still “liking” stuff on his wall… no mentions about his death… possible hoax?

Bill SApril 25, 2012 at 10:48 pm -

Eddy, are you asking if his death is a hoax, or if his Facebook page is one?

EddyApril 26, 2012 at 1:33 am -

Bill, if you check out his FB wall… he’s still liking stuff as recent as this evening… unless someone else is posting on his wall.

Oh, about still “Liking Stuff” on his own wall; –It’s all part of Falzarano’s latest “ministry”: EX-dead. “You see, -you don’t need to be dead, because people can change.” – Falzarano’s ghost writer.
On a more serious note: Pathological liars like Falzarano are particularly celebrated when they’re finally dead – especially by the victims of their misinformation campaigns (usually young guys who are just discovering their sexuality is less than 100% ‘str8′ and have the unfortunate circumstance of being in ‘fundamentalist’ households). Having studied his writing for YEARS, -I confronted Falzarano on his gigantic lies several times –many of which are still in archive on-line.
Here’s what he constantly lied giant lies about:
1) That sexual attraction is either “Hetero” or “Homo”. His rants treated the issue of sexuality as if it was a switch from one state to another; –& thus denying that FACT that amBIsexual orientation is by far, the most predominant. BIsexuals are the Majority –as his own life itself testified to.
2) That the Bible is anti-samesex. The Scriptures that seem to be anti-samesex are actually prohibitions against AnalSex. The same Scriptures have as a theme the essential need to repent from “acts that lead to death”. Science has discovered that AnalSex (besides being injurious to the ‘bottom’), is some +5000% more apt to spread diseases than even 0ralSex! For the same reason it’s dangerous to play in an open sewer, -playing in the butthole is equally bad. This is also why that the old-testament (/Torah) has N0 prohibition against “women laying with woman” (& that omission speaks volumes as to the intent of the commandment against men laying with men AS with a woman).
3) That is you’re a man who loves men, that you’re going to be involved with AnalSex. The g0ys men’s movement is a gigantic testimony against that lie! Regular guys who happen to love guys/too, -who do NOT engage in AnalSex! G0YS (spelled w. a zer0)!
4) That samesex attracted people are involved with a pattern of stereotypical behaviors all part of something called the “GAY lifestyle”. Falzarano himself admitted to being part of that very thingus he called “gay lifestyle”. The giant lie was that sexual-orientation had anything to do with participation. As the g0ys frankly state: “You can be a person who loves their own gender -without living like a dung-beetle”.
5) That people like him were “Christian”. If you met a man who called himself a “Rabbi” and spent his time munching on pork-chops, & misquoting the Torah in order to sell his books, –would you believe him to be a “Rabbi” of the “Jewish” faith? Falzarano called himself a “Christian”, but it is very clear that the “Jesus” he preached was NOT the “Yeshua” of the Scriptures. And ironically, -the Scriptures themselves warn again that very thing! Read Galatians (St. Paul makes clear that men like Falzarano who are all concerned about the ‘state of the penis’ are ANATHEMA {damned})! Falzarano was a person whom the Scriptures warn about — that because they did NOT receive a love of the truth (but reveled in inequity) -that God would send them a powerful delusion that they’d believe a lie. Or as Jesus/Yeshua pointed out about the false religious teachers of his day: That they’d go over land & sea to win a single convert, and upon doing so, –make that convert a two-fold child of hell (sounds like ex-gay ministries to me). And that is precisely what the “ex-gay” programs like Falzarano promoted, –churned out: Liars who intermingled unrelated issues & destroyed lives on a regular basis. 2 years ago, -I confronted Falzarano with the theology on the g0ys website and interestingly enough, –just as in the parable of the fig-tree: Two seasons passed & then he was cut down. Coincidence? You say.

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