Words from the pulpit of the First Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Palm Beaches, and other significant messages.

Tuesday, January 5, 2016

'Til the Season Comes 'Round Again

It’s the last Sunday of 2015. Are you wondering, like me, where the year went? It seems like we’ve just gotten used to writing 2015, and I don’t know about you, but I know it’s going to take me weeks before I stop writing the wrong year. But I know some people are ready to move on. They are tired of the holidays, they’re thinking that all they really wanted for Christmas was for Mariah Carey to stop singing, they’ve taken down their decorations, if they had any up in the first place, and they are already looking past New Year’s to our next big national celebration, Super Bowl Sunday.

This is a time of year when people often talk about endings and beginnings. It’s the end of one year, the beginning of the next, at least for those of us who follow the Gregorian calendar. But not all cultures do this, there are other New Year’s observances, so our New Year’s celebration can be considered an arbitrary beginning, an arbitrary end. So I’m not going to talk about endings and beginnings. I prefer to focus on two ideas, or activities if you will that are prevalent through the holidays, reflection and anticipation.

I think it’s natural to start reflecting on the past year and even farther back during the holidays. It’s a time we traditionally gather with family and friends, and there is a lot of storytelling that goes on. My mother used to roll her eyes as my dad started to tell the same stories about his childhood or about his army experiences during World War II that he told pretty much every year at either Thanksgiving or Christmas or both. It’s not unusual for sentences at holiday gatherings to begin, “remember when…,” to be followed by a description of some memorable event. It might be some memorable life event, for instance, the first time you celebrated the holidays together as a couple, or it may be an occasion that lives in family lore for other reasons, such as what is known in our household as the great Thanksgiving turkey brine disaster, the title of which I think is self-explanatory. Let’s just say that I haven’t tried to brine a turkey since.

Holidays are all about those memories and stories, whether they are our family stories or those of our traditions, be it jars of oil or shepherds and angels. And I loved what Rev. Janet Onnie told us about stories a few weeks ago: stories don’t need to have happened to be true. They are part of our memories, and one of the most important parts of the holidays, at least to my mind, is making new memories. But sometimes we are so caught up in the trappings of the holidays, decorating so the house looks like something on a Pinterest board, choosing the perfect gift, or cooking that perfect turkey. We have to remember that the personal is more important than the perfect, because the personal is what is going to make the memory.

So to me, the holiday season can also be called reflection season, and it starts around Thanksgiving, as we start to consider the things we’re thankful for. Those feelings of gratitude carry through the new year. And this attitude of reflection and gratitude is healthy for us and those around us. I’m reminded of a saying — and I don’t know its source — “it is not happy people who are thankful; it is thankful people who are happy.” I find myself at this time of year being grateful for little things. Now, most of you know that I’m a musician, specifically a singer, and though I don’t own one, I’ve seen a t-shirt that says “75% of my brain capacity is wasted on song lyrics.” I’m not sure I agree with the wasted part of that, but 75% sounds about right, or maybe even on the low side. But it’s true that I have a song lyric for every occasion, and I am always reminded at this time of year of a song written by Teresa Jennings, a wonderful songwriter who specializes in music for primary schools. The song is called “Grateful for the Little Things,” and it lists lots of things that kids, and grownups, too, might grateful for, such as puppies, seashells, laughter, and family. It’s the last line that puts it all in perspective: “It’s the little things that matter most, they’re really not that small. In fact, they’re the greatest of all.” I think that’s the perfect attitude for our reflection and gratitude this time of year. And it’s certainly a time when we should consider and be grateful for the gifts, large and small, that others have brought into our lives, and the lessons we have learned from one another. To quote another of my favorite songs, “because I knew you, I have been changed for good.” Personally, this year I’m grateful for the friend who suggested we come here and for the members and friends of this Congregation who welcomed and encouraged Ken and me on our new journey as Unitarian Universalists.

Hand in hand with reflection goes anticipation. Although anticipation is something we experience year round, it increases with the holiday season. We anticipate the arrival of family or travel to be with family. We anticipate the fellowship of sharing a wonderful meal. The child in us anticipates the gifts under the Christmas tree. The adult in us anticipates the pleasure that our gifts to others will bring.

As we look to the new year, we anticipate what the future will bring. Author Caroline Kepnes calls anticipation an invitation into the future. It may be looking forward to little things: appointments on our calendar for the next few weeks, or it may be life-changing events — moving into a new home, the birth of a child or grandchild.

How do we view the future? It’s a pertinent question. One view is that expressed by British comedian and actor Russell Brand, who writes, “people don’t seem to realize that the future is just like now, but in a little while, so they say they’re going to do things in anticipation of some kind of seismic shift in their worldview that never actually materializes. Tomorrow is not some mythical kingdom where you’ll grow butterfly wings and be able to talk to animals — you’ll basically feel pretty much the same way you do at the moment.” While I agree with Brand that the world isn’t going to change at 12:01am on January 1st, I think it’s important to be more optimistic than that. Why can’t we look forward to not just personal happiness, but a better, more caring world? We may not, as the reading suggests, be able to ring out the old and ring in the new, and would we really want to sweep away everything? As Carly Simon’s song says, “we may never know the things to come,” but if we anticipate a better world, if we do more than just hope for the best, but resolve to do our parts, large and small, then we have a chance of achieving that brighter future, of ringing out the dark and ringing in the light.

For all our talk of beginnings and endings, so much of our lives, like the years, is circular. This week I’ve been reminiscing about last Christmas, and the differences between then and now. As we get older, the years run faster, and the next holiday season is too soon upon us. And, as usual for me, there’s a song that expresses it much better than I can, so I’d like to share this song that speaks to the ideas of reminiscences, anticipation, and that circle of life. May we love and laugh in the time that we have, ‘til the season comes ‘round again. 'Til the Season Comes 'Round Again, a sermon delivered by Lynn Pernezny at 1stUUPB, Dec 27, 2015.

Come and gather around at the tableIn the spirit of family and friendsAnd we'll all join hands and remember this moment'Til the season comes 'round again.

Let's all try to smile for the pictureAnd we'll hold it as long as we canMay it carry us throughShould we ever get lonely'Til the season comes 'round again.

One night holy and brightShining with love from our heartsBy a warm fireLet's left our heads highAnd be thankful we're here'Til this time next year.

May the new year be blessedWith good tidings'Til the next time I see you againIf we must say goodbyeLet the spirit go with you'Til the season comes 'round again.

One night holy and brightShining with love from our heartsBy a warm fireLet's left our heads highAnd be thankful we're here'Til this time next year.

May the new year be blessedWith good tidingsTill the next time I see you againIf we must say goodbyeLet the spirit go with youAnd we'll love and we'll laughIn the time that we had'Til the season comes 'round again