Please don't beat us up.

Ricky and Dirk employ the help of their pal Steve to attempt the seemingly impossible task of explaining J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantasy mythological-history of Middle Earth in The Silmarillion. Steve establishes his unshakable Dwarf fandom. Dirk tells Dave a bedtime story about revenge and bloodlust. Ricky is faced with his own mortality. Dave discovers that he has a lot in common with the lord of all Evil.

Dave, Ricky and Dirk are coming in hot next week with the 11th episode of Two Nerds and a Guy from Long Island! SPOILER: It’s a fantasy thing. Weird, right.

WE HIT OVER 1000 LISTENS LAST WEEK! Ridiculously awesome. But we can’t do it without our listeners! In attempts to get our sonic garbage into the ears of other nerd-curious folks, we ask that you take about 30 seconds to leave us a review!

Ricky and Dirk pull a sci-fi hat trick by forcing a sleepy Dave listen to them geek out about John Scalzi’s Starship-Troopers-adjacent novel, Old Man’s War. Ricky sings a Gregorian battle hymn. Dirk gives us all a lesson on the properties of time-space. Dave. Has. His. Mind. BLOWN. (And loves it.)

Ricky and Dirk try to paint a word picture for Dave of one of their favorite real-time strategy games of all time, Starcraft. Ricky admits some things about Jim Raynor that he probably wishes he could take back. Dirk goes online. Dave has some ground-breaking ideas concerning Zerg family trees, and also enjoys a delicious Marino’s Cherry Italian Ice.

BONUS: Listen for a special word from our first sponsor, ‘Water Up Dawg’, during the break!

Ricky and Dirk try to explain the widely influential cult classic cyberpunk, sci-fi anime film Akira, to Dave. Ricky describes his dream jacket. Dirk screams the lead characters names over and over for an hour. Dave reveals he would like to be the leader of a very warm-hearted biker gang. Everyone struggles comically trying to pronounce Japanese words.

Friend of the podcast, Steve, joins us as Dave takes over and tries to explain to Dirk and Ricky how to be a man. He uses the appropriate film, Rambo: First Blood, as a medium to get across such points as: Which directions should stabbing flow in? How much oil should you use when showing off ripped pecs? And how do you cook ravioli THE RIGHT WAY?

Ricky and Dirk do their best to start explaining Stephen King’s sprawling western-fantasy-scifi-horror-adventure series, The Dark Tower, to Dave. He admits that it’s the first story he could possibly get into (if he could read). Dirk manages to talk about The Wheel of Time. Ricky mindlessly brings back the controversial game, ‘Dave Talks’. Dave gets REALLY DEEP about THE WORLD.

Ricky and Dirk try to explain the ambitious science fiction space opera of Battlestar Galactica (2004-2009) to Dave. Full disclosure – we basically detail and question the ENTIRETY of the show’s plot in this episode. So, uh, spoiler alert. Ricky shits all over the charming robot film ‘Chappie’. Dirk rips open some glaring plot holes. Dave questions his own sexuality.

Ricky and Dirk quickly realize they’ve made a huge mistake in trying to describe Robert Jordan’s sprawling high fantasy epic novel series, The Wheel of Time, to Dave. The boys reveal the origin story for this topic as well as the podcast. Dirk plays coy about his feelings for his favourite character and their clothing choices. Ricky investigates Robert Jordan’s murky past. Dave tells us the first thing he would say to a dog if he could speak to them. It’s not exactly mind-blowing.

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Ricky and Dirk try to explain the globally popular Role-playing game franchise, Final Fantasy, to Dave. Ricky repeatedly mistakenly refers to the episode as “episode two”. Dirk sings some jingles for our segments. Dave describes his very own ‘Final Fantasy’. It’s easily the most haunting thing Ricky and Dirk have had to sit through so far.

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