A new Public Opinion Polling survey finds that 62% of voters think it’s important for the President to have a high school diploma, compared to only 31% who think it doesn’t matter.

Interesting: “There’s a large partisan divide on the issue: Democrats by an 81%-14% spread think it’s important, while Republicans are evenly divided on the matter at 45%-45%.”

When asked to respond to this poll, Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker said, “Only elitists and ISIS supporters would buy into that requirement, whereas Senator Rand Paul said, “Have I mentioned that I’m a doctor?”

UPDATE: I was chagrined to learn that my column has fallen afoul of Poe’s Law. What the heck is Poe’s Law? The “literary adage which stipulates that without a clear indicator of an author’s intended sarcasm it becomes impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.”

So for anyone who read this and accepted the poll as real and/or any of the quotes as real, this is hundred percent parody. It was inspired by an actual poll related to whether people believe a U.S. President should have a college degree.

Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal, formerly a Common Core enthusiast, now claims that the U.S. Education Department’s initiative is an Obama “power-grab.” He’s even suing the federal government, in an appeal to wingnutty Tenthers.

Ka-ching!

Sleazy To The Core (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bobby Jindal has filed a fed suit
To get Common Core given the boot:
Obama, claims Bob,
Did a power-grab job:
A prez wannabe, raising some loot.

As a devout liberal, I’ve been pretty disappointed in Obama’s presidency. But the constant complaints about his letting off steam via golf are absurd.

To those who claim Obama’s too indifferent to public opinion, think about this: When no matter what you do you’re under constant (often nonsensical) attack, you might as well do what you want.

And don’t even get me started on the fact that most of the horror we’re embroiled in right now is a direct (or indirect) result of the war of choice in Iraq that George W. Bush (Mr. Vacation himself) lied us into.

Golf Wars (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When Obama goes golfing, the press
And the pols say the world’s in a mess,
So the prez should not play.
But they’ll bitch come what may.
So he might as well drive off some stress.

Although Texas Governor Rick Perry hasn’t announced yet, it’s pretty clear that he’s planning to run for the GOP presidential nomination. Now I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to some more juicy “oops” moments.

Perry seemed pumped up after his enthusiastic, heckle-free reception at the Register’s Soapbox. When the Register’s moderator thanked him as he came off the stage, Perry said: “You’re welcome. I’m awesome!”

Limerick Ode To “Awesome” Rick Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“You’re welcome. I’m awesome!” said Perry.
Oops, was Perry pumped up? I’d say, “Very!”
Seems another prez run
By that man will be fun.
No debate, Rick will help us make merry.

Have you noticed the new wave of stories about Chris Christie’s upcoming Iowa visit? This renewed coverage of Christie’s presidential aspirations gives me an excuse to post this non-limerick of mine, which I entered in the Style Invitational’s recent double dactyl contest:

Bridgery Fridgery,
Governor Christie is
Stuck in a scandal and
Can’t bridge the gap.

Karl Rove a/k/a “Turd Blossom” a/k/a “Bush’s Brain” is at it again. And this time his target is Hillary Clinton. First he strongly implies that she had “traumatic brain injury,” while greatly exaggerating the length of her hospital stay:

“Thirty days in the hospital?” Rove said, according to the report. “And when she reappears, she’s wearing glasses that are only for people who have traumatic brain injury? We need to know what’s up with that.”

I just love Jeff Greenfield’s take on the “Baby Clinton Madness.” I’m referring, of course, to all the nonsensical opinionating about its effect (or non-effect) on Hillary Clinton’s presumed presidential candidacy.