Thursday, January 9, 2014

So, school has started back after my two week break and it has
gone by so fast! I have made goal for myself to try to focus more on the
positive things that happen daily so as not to focus so much on everything that
is harder. Joni Eareckson Tada suggested this prayer: Father, I present to you
today the disappointing things in my life that hold sad or tragic meaning. Turn
my darkness into light. Exchange the sadness for hope. You are the God who
turns weeping into joy!

Along with this way of thinking has come some new information
about Brad’s accident. We originally were told gravel was to blame for the
accident. Brad had his doubts but he had no memory of the accident. However, we
have recently gotten some new details that confirm the accident was not caused
by gravel. We will continue to investigate and give updates when we can.

However, this time of year still brings up sad thoughts;
Sunday will be 2 years. Having to be up so early for school and driving before
the sun is up reminds me of all of the early mornings I would ride with my dad
to the hospital for the first visiting hour of the day. It was so cold, surreal,
devastating. Sometimes I flashback to those days and I have to be intentional
of thinking about something else because it can ruin the whole day. My brother
also has a friend who has been in ICU. After visiting his family and
remembering all of the days spent in the hospital hallway, not knowing what the
future would hold, has made me appreciate how far we have come. It all seems
like a blur, like a nightmare and one morning we will wake up “normal” again.
This is why I am making time daily to list my “positives” (marriage, personal,
classroom, etc.) and reflect on these instead of reliving a life I can’t do
anything to get back. “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See,
I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making
a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.” –Isaiah 43:18 & 19