No, really. I get it. It’s not what it used to be. It’s a pain in the a$$ to get tickets. Expensive tickets. Expensive tickets that not all of your friends were able to get, even after spending an hour in the online waiting room of death during pre-sale, totally f*cking up your standard Coachella group. And half of the ones who did manage to get tickets got them for the second week. F*cking up your standard Coachella group even more.

I, too, was slightly disappointed by the line-up. I f*cking love music, but I don’t go to nearly enough shows where I should be able to say that I’ve seen almost everyone on said line-up live.

And, of course, 90% of the people storming the desert could care less about the music, and are more concerned with parties, attractive strangers, and their ensembles. Hi, welcome to life. Do you hate that, too? (Totally cool, if you do. Just curious.)

The recent newsfeed-clogging, Coachella-bashing article on Bullett covered all of this. Its writer, Luke O Neil (no apostrophe after that O, Luke?) took it even one step further to say that music festivals aren’t for music lovers and basically shouldn’t exist.

Um, who made you king of the music lovers?

As I mentioned above, I f*cking love music. I also love music festivals. Because in addition to music, I love sunshine, happy people, friends and frolicking.

Yes, I will want to stab the oversized/underdressed whore in the Sahara Tent who won’t stop saying the stupidest things I’ve ever heard, in the most annoying voice imaginable, while stepping on my feet, elbowing me in the ribs and spilling her $15 beer all over my carefully planned Coachella outfit. (Yup. I plan my outfits. I forgot to mention that I also love playing dress-up.) But, while I’m staring her down with my most severe look of death, I will be surrounded by some of my best friends in the world, creating unforgettable* memories to an awesome soundtrack. Best friends I never get to see because they decided, at one point in their lives, to move to another country. They’re not going to fly to LA for a one-night concert, but they will trek out to the desert for three days of unabated bliss.

Sure, that awesome soundtrack could be a bit more enlightened. And it’s a bummer that it’s not. But, there are still a few names on there with which I’m unfamiliar, and I’m totally stoked to latch onto a new bestie’s hand and sprint in sheer euphoria across the polo fields for the chance to check out a possible new fave musician, in the most commitment-free of environments.

So yeah. As much as I would love Coachella to be as it once was, and as much as I loathe the masses for always ruining everything…I’m about to drive out to the land of dry heat for an amazing weekend filled with my favorite things.

If you want to sit in a dark room with your headphones, hey - you do you.

*We’ll take plenty of pics, just in case things get a little hazy. You’re welcome, Instagram.