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Editorial

Another tragic loss

Teen’s suicide underlines need for awareness, compassion and action

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Wednesday May 21, 2014 5:34 AM

No one ever will eliminate human cruelty, but the death of Cora DeLille is a heartbreaking reminder that ignoring it can lead to terrible things.

The 15-year-old Pickerington girl wasn’t without friends and loving family, but still the taunts of teens who chose her as an object of torment hurt her enough that they probably played a role in her suicide.

The adults in her life, even her mother, say they didn’t realize what was going on or how bad it was. That’s a common frustration for bullying victims and their families: Schools often don’t have an effective response to bullying. Often it takes place where teachers and principals don’t see it — in fleeting moments in the hallways, at a mall or a movie theater or on social media.

School officials feel their hands are tied if they have no proof that alleged bullies have broken any rules. Bullies are surreptitious enough that teachers and principals truly don’t know what’s happening among their students.

In a school setting, that leaves it to peers to speak up when they know that someone is in the kind of pain that Cora apparently felt.

They should speak up to adults and let them know what they’ve heard and seen, especially if they believe a target of bullies could be in serious despair. Their witnessing might be enough to convince authorities to intervene more vigorously.

But teens also should speak to the person who is being bullied. A sympathetic word or offer of friendship could make a world of difference to someone who believes no one cares.

Anti-bullying campaigns of recent years are a worthwhile effort to make people more aware of the problem and to teach teens how destructive their callousness and that of others can be.

But the roots of the problem are deep in human nature. The insecurity and maladjustment that leads some people to derive satisfaction from belittling and hurting others seems an unfortunately permanent feature of humanity.

It sometimes is difficult to see why certain kids become bullying targets. It might be a physical or cultural difference or simply a personality that seems vulnerable. That can complicate efforts to diagnose bullying and to assess its damage. Psychologists caution that bullying rarely is the sole cause of a tragedy such as Cora’s; some people endure vicious treatment as adolescents and are able to leave it behind and thrive in the adult world.

But for those who also struggle with emotional trauma or mental illness or some other source of stress, the isolation and hurt inflicted by a bully can be too much to bear.

That’s why it is so worthwhile for teens to understand that by introducing some kindness into the sometimes-cruel atmosphere of middle school and high school, they could do something more important than they’ve ever imagined.

The grieving students who attended Cora DeLille’s funeral no doubt have a clear understanding of the consequences of unchallenged bullying. If more students in more schools could come to that understanding before a tragedy happens, there might be fewer such funerals.

To reach the Franklin County Suicide Prevention Hotline, call 614-221-5445; the Teen Suicide Prevention Hotline, 614-294-3300; or the Lifeline national organization for suicide prevention, 1-800-273-8255.