Loved

I can’t understand
Why I can’t be loved
And it’s ugly
these thoughts that keep me down
Unable to see the good in myself
That I can’t hold my self
While tears of self loathing fall onto my own palm
But I don’t understand why I can’t find love
Because she can
And he will sit and listen as if he cares
But once I give him what’s forbidden
He’s gone and once again I’m stuck wondering
Can I even be loved