Booty Tooch

"﻿If you remember not to tread with caution, I'll make your body speak in full distortion." - Hot Chip

Well, check me out in the fourth photo up there! No, I'm not molesting a tree. I do believe that is a booty tooch. Tyra Banks would be so proud. I started out with a pose like the one in the third photo, but Jerry told me to put my arm further back behind me, and whallah, booty tooch. Those creepy photography dudes really know how to trick you into a sexy pose. Perves! Honestly, I really try my best not to hug things as much these days, but I threw all caution to the wind in these photos and had some fun.

I purchased this dress a couple of weeks ago for 40% off at The Limited. It had caught my eye once before, but I didn't want to pay full price for it. I was really surprised to see it still around after the holidays, marked down with an additional 40% off. As I moved my mouse over to the available sizes box, I was pretty sure there were only going to be XS's or XL's left. I clicked and was delighted to see a big fat M staring back at me. Truly, that never happens. It was a sign! I purchased this sucker as fast as my fingers would let me. I noticed once I made my purchase, the dress was no longer on the website. I prepared myself for the possibilty of a cancellation, but 24 hours later, I received a shipping notification in my inbox. Yes, I must have scored the last one!

Once I received it, I wasn't sure if I liked it or not. It's a little more form fitting than I thought it would be. In addition to the booty tooch, I have a little tummy pooch. Booty tooch = good. Tummy pooch = bad. Then I heard the voices of comments past in my head saying, "Show off those curves", "Be a woman", "Own your body", "Stop dressing like a frump." I was inspired. I had earned that tummy pooch and by golly I was going to show it off! I ended up getting several compliments, and Jerry told me I looked hot! I guess it pays off to own your body. Maybe the tummy pooch is the new booty tooch! Yeah, I'm not holding my breath, or should I say sucking in my stomach.

CONVERSATION

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comments:

Long time lurker, first time commenter! I avoid sweater dresses for this exact reason, I am overweight after the birth of my son 4 years ago, and I've got quite the belly pooch. However, you are so right, we've earned it. I'll be honest- I did notice it. I hate my stomach so that's just where my eyes gravitate on everyone. But I wasn't disgusted at all, and then when I read you talking about it I HAD to comment :)

Good for you! Here's hoping the tummy pooch will become the next booty tooch!

And here is what I like best about you, Bonnie- your self confidence. Believe it or not, you have a tremendous amount of self confidence! The "this is me and I am FABULOUS!" attitude (and yes, you have it, don't try to hide it) is enviable amongst all of us with our body image issues. Women have curves. I know very, very few women who have a super flat stomach and plenty more with tummy pooch way bigger than yours that are not remotely self-conscious about their bodies. It's those curvy, confident ones that are the enviable ones. Believe that!

You look awesome in your clingy sweater dress! The comfortable, confident, "happy to be me" attitude is what is most beautiful about you. This is what is great about being in your 30s! I'm getting there-- though I am a year older than you but have a long history of body image issues to overcome. You are inspiring. :) Great post!

And here is what I like best about you, Bonnie- your self confidence. Believe it or not, you have a tremendous amount of self confidence! The "this is me and I am FABULOUS!" attitude (and yes, you have it, don't try to hide it) is enviable amongst all of us with our body image issues. Women have curves. I know very, very few women who have a super flat stomach and plenty more with tummy pooch way bigger than yours that are not remotely self-conscious about their bodies. It's those curvy, confident ones that are the enviable ones. Believe that!

You look awesome in your clingy sweater dress! The comfortable, confident, "happy to be me" attitude is what is most beautiful about you. This is what is great about being in your 30s! I'm getting there-- though I am a year older than you but have a long history of body image issues to overcome. You are inspiring. :) Great post!

Thank you for showing me that brown and black and/or grey go together just fine! I always try to match everything - I would have wound up with black shoes/boots in your outfit of today (and yesterday's for that matter) and then I would have thought, hmph - blah. These colour combos are great - and not so straight-laced, as mine end up looking. I've made a note! :o)

Oh, Catherine. I wouldn't go that far. I'm pretty much hating on my body after these pictures, but I do have a sense of humor about it. What else you gonna do? I agree with you, though. The most attractive women are those who are comfortable in their own skin. I'm still getting there too.

Bonnie, Bonnie, Bonnie!!! YOU LOOK AWESOME! You need to wear more form fitting clothes... especially if you are feeling confident. It really shows - and yes those photogs are perves... I am married to one! LOL! Seriously, though, you look awesome and the pics are gorgeous. The one where Jerry got you to pose in a "sexy" way - is very sweet, hot and flattering all at one time. Great job and super cute outfit! Cheers! Sherry xoxo

I like that you gave that tree a good working over, you've been holding back on the "props love" long enough. Booty clutch in one photo, left boob is groping a branch in another photo. I love the suggestion of a tummy pooch/tree branch slow dance in the last photo. Priceless. ;)

I was never slim to begin with but three kids later there is no hiding the tummy. All that stretching during pregnancy and now gravity has taken over. I think you look great and I also like the way you combined the neutrals. :)

This = sexiness. Your body looks amazing in that dress - show your shape! My body is similar to yours, although I'm shorter. Any time I wear a body hugging dress I feel self-conscious...until my husband loses all control of himself and I realize maybe I look better than I realize.

I know! How have I gotten through life without knowing the proper way to spell voila'? You know, I happen to like whallah better. Voila' sounds like something a know-it-all with a stick up their ass would say.

Thanks! I think most women (myself included) are way too critical of themselves. Jerry loved me in this dress. I, on the other hand, felt really self-conscious in it. As women, I think we've been trained by the media to be dissatisfied with our bodies. After all, there would be no products and services to sell if women were happy with their bodies. Men, on the other hand, don't seem to give a rat's ass about a little tummy or the million other natural things that women perceive as defects. You don't see them out trying to find clothes to strategically hide their tummies. Hell, around these parts they show it off like it's a trophy. LOL! The important thing is I'm healthy and not overweight. No, my stomach isn't as flat as a board like it was before I had 3 kids, but I'll take the joy my 3 kids bring me over a flat stomach any day!

Thanks for the link. I had already looked it up when I got a couple of comments about it. I just spelled it the way it sounded to me. I even Googled the spelling before I posted, and it came up in search, so I thought I had spelled it right. On closer inspection, it just looks like there are some other idiots out there like me that spelled it wrong.

Really, you can't win. When I dress to hide my flaws, people call me frumpy. When I let it all hang out, people call me fat. I think the real learning process is to dress in what feels comfortable to you and screw what everybody else thinks.

Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot I'm supposed to respond to condescending comments that have no other purpose other than to make me feel stupid with "Thank you for pointing out my grammatical shortcomings. You are a god of grammar, and I'm not worthy of your time."

You reveal yourself to be a pathetic loser who has nothing better to do than to leave nasty, anonymous comments on my blog. Why don't you try a little kindness, and whallah, that stick might disappear from your ass!

?? That seems unduly negative, given that you receive a lot of positive feedback. Just the other day you posted an outfit and many people commented that it was flattering (and slimming). It's not really an accurate assessment of your commenters to say you "can't win."

I didn't mean I can't win with the commenters. I meant I can't win with that philosophy- "dressing to flatter my figure" because everyone has a different opinion on what's flattering. The only was to truly win is to dress for yourself and not care what other people think.

That is so true! When did a little roundness on the body become a bad thing? I hope this link works properly, but I love this: http://a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc7/387383_10151161203925296_688110295_22396786_981368504_n.jpg

I mean really...those pin-ups have it all over the skin and bones look that some seem to love so much!

Wow. That really got you riled up, huh? You're carrying around a whole lot of rage and hatefulness. I wonder who else in your life pays the price for that when they touch a nerve. Let it go. It's toxic. The people you unleash it on can walk away from it, but it will keep eating away at you.

Hey Bonnie,I am a new reader to your blog. Just wanted to say I think you should wear your hair away from your face more often. You have a pretty face and frankly wearing your hair down and in your face doesn't do much for you. I like this dress on you very much. Cheers, JHW.

Here's a lesson we can all learn... and it's not meant to be nasty! Sometimes clothes just aren't cut right for you - no big deal! What's bad is when you buy something online that just doesn't fit correctly and you keep it. PLEASE just spend the extra time/money and return the item. There's no need to walk around looking like ten pounds of beans in a five pound sack if you can help it! Seriously! Just. Send. It. Back!!!!

Schadenfreude is even worse than envy...it demonstrates a need by someone to have his/her sense of superiority reinforced...which indicates the person feels rather inferior. Maybe you could focus on building yourself up rather than trying to tear other people down. In the end it will benefit you so much more.

I really hate that thing that's circulating around. It's still comparing and judging women based on their appearance and "hotness." It's not morally superior if the preference for heavier women. It's exactly as gross, judgmental and sexist as if you prefer thinner women.

Is this my mom? LOL! She has told me this since I was a little girl. Of course, this came from a woman who kept my hair cut short like a boy. Thanks for the suggestion! You're probably right, but I'm going to continue my rebellious behavior and wear my hair the way I like it! Glad you're not afraid of a little tummy pooch and like the dress!

This coming from someone who said women get thicker through the middle as they age and need to learn how to dress appropriately to "flatter" their figure. "Flatter" as in make yourself look as flat as possible.

I'm sorry, but I don't feel sorry for the poor thin girls. They've got the majority of world on their sides. Us, fatties, have got to take our kicks where we can get 'em. And if that means claiming we're "hotter" than the skinnes then so be it!

I see what you're saying here and agree with you to a certain degree but, it's only YOUR opinion that this dress doesn't fit correctly. I happen to think this dress fits me very nicely, and apparently so do some other people. So what do you do then? Again, I go back to the only real rule you can follow is to dress in what you like and not worry about the rest.

Did you change around the comments, Bonnie? When I first saw the comment by pjshoegal that begins with "Wow. That really got you riled up, etc," it was in response to you. Did you move it around so that it seems to be in response to Youstupidcow?

Man. Anytime someone makes a valid point, you try to twist what you're doing/saying or have some time of smart retort, or point at them. Can't keep running away, Bonnie. You say you don't care what people think, then you stress your belief that things look good on you (or whatever) by saying "apparently other people think so too").

I don't agree with this cyber-bullying, or what looks like back-and-forth retorts between children on a playground (except you and your commentators are adults), but I do think you need time to yourself and away from this blog. Ask yourself this - would you feel empty or something if you discontinued this blog? Why do you need it (why do you need it really)? Is it indeed for attention, some type of acknowledgement? For the few readers who blindly praise your every move?

--From a truly non-hostile commentator who gains no benefit from trying to be mean to you

No, the comment from pjshoegal has always been in response to Youstupidcow. Here's a context screen shot from Disqus. I do not have the ability to move around the context of comments nor would I. What would be the point given their are plenty of other nasty comments about me?

Hell yes, I point to them! We are all flawed and none of us has the right to tell someone else how to live their life, dress their body, etc., etc. I'm not running away. If I was running away, I wouldn't post the comments to begin with. In fact, I'm doing the exact opposite. I'm facing my fear of rejection on this blog, and it's making me into a stronger person. I think it's funny that you tell me I can't keep running away but then tell me to stop blogging. LOL!

I need this blog because it's an expression of myself. I love to write, I love fashion, and I love photography. This blog combines all 3 of my loves. I put it out on the Internet because, crazy enough, there are people out there who have been through or are going through the same things I have, and I want to be someone they can relate to. It's also had an affect on me that I didn't intend. All the criticism I've received has forced me to see that I'm too dependent on other's opinions of me. I need to be secure in myself and my decisions in life without input from other people. It's a work in progress for me, and part of my therapy is this blog. So no, I'm not going to walk away, but if you don't agree with me, you are welcome to do so at any time.

Say what? I didn't say anything about looking as flat as possible. Can't imagine why you'd presume such a thing. And yes, women (and men for that matter) do in fact tend to put on abdominal weight with age. This isn't exactly a news flash. For heaven's sake, you brought up your so-called "tummy pooch." You're far from alone in having one.

If you'll look at my earlier comment, you'll see that I didn't remark on your outfit choice. You seemed to find it flattering and were happy with it, and I recognized that. Dressing for your figure was, I thought, the topic of your post and other recent posts as well. You seemed very content with both this dress and the other recent outfit.

I don't feel sorry for "poor thin girls" but I don't see much merit into dividing womenkind into "sides" based on body weight and picking a "hotness" winner. It's bad enough when men do that IMO.

Oh I love how it demonstrates the change in what's considered acceptable body shape for women. We could even trace it back further in history. We'd see some changes for men as well, although not to the same extreme. I love that women come in all shapes and sizes and they should all be celebrated! I just hate that what's currently in fashion is the incredibly disappearing woman. I hate that women's bodies are now supposed to be so misshapen by liposuction and implants that we don't even know what healthy looks like anymore! Those pinups are natural. They could have included Twiggy too. I'm all for tall and slender if that's what's natural for one's body. I love to celebrate healthy BMIs and natural bodies. Nothing gross or sexist about that ;)

Oh, I'm so sorry I presumed your comment about dressing to flatter a "thicker middle" was suggesting that it's a bad thing to have said "thicker middle." Why in the hell would I assume that?!?

No, you didn't specifically say anything about looking as flat as possible, but wouldn't the point of wearing something "appropriate" and "flattering" be to flatten the tummy area or at least create the illusion of a flat stomach? Speaking of news flashes, it's a known fact that the majority of people consider any kind of fat to be bad (tummy pooch) and thin to be good. That's where the hypocrisy of your argument lies. You can't complain about people saying thin girls aren't as hot as fat girls and then say fat girls should wear things to flatten their big stomachs.

I agree with you on one thing: dividing women into sides. I don't like labels. I think it's ridiculous that people categorize me as fat when I'm not overweight but that's the way it is. I don't see the harm in saying a little meat on my bones makes me sexy when thin girls get so many other perks.

When I say running away, I mean running away from considering whether someone who is not agreeing with you (or your actions or whatever) might have at least a grain of truth about what they're saying. Letting go of blogging wouldn't be running away, at least not for the reasons I believe you should stop. It's not to run away from these commentators - it's bc it seems that you try to be very in your face on your blog, as if you're mad at the world, a "you have bullied and tried to control me my whole life, now I'm going to do what *I* want" kind of attitude, in teenager fashion. The thing is, the same world that is treating you this way is the same world that also treats me, and the commentator below me and the person at the grocery store, etc. There is a wise way to deal with it, and spending all your time with an "in your face" attitude is only going to erode away at you.

I'm sure you'll contrive some seemingly smart retort to what I've said here, but it's as clear as day to everyone who is somewhat normal what's going on with you underneath the surface. Yes, we are all messed up, but some people want to improve and some people don't. Those who really truly want to improve on themselves will be able to find the smallest grain of wisdom or truth from the advice of a person who may even be giving it with ill intentions. That is real wisdom and self-control.

But you aren't going to listen to me bc you have a knack for not listening it seems. Just thought I'd reply anyway to clear up what I meant.

Don't ever call yourself a "fat girl" Bonnie. Looking healthy and having a few curves (which is natural for women) is not fat! You are by no stretch of the imagination fat. I'm telling you, a lot of women have a hard time with other women being comfortable in their own skin. I do think that this desire to knock them down a peg has to do with feeling insecure with themselves (as a previous commentor has pointed out).

When I agree with someone I say so and when I don't I say so. Simple as that. I'm not trying to be in your face nor am I mad at the world. I'm just a woman with opinions, and I'm not going to agree with someone just to be nice. It used to erode away at me when I went along with what people wanted me to do so they would like me.

Now, for my seemingly smart retort:I'm not interested in being "normal" as you put it. I'm interested in being myself. I'm sorry if I'm not improving as a person in your eyes, but I am in my own eyes and that's what matters to me.

I'm listening to you, and I respect your opinion, but I don't agree with you. That's all. Good luck to you too!

LOL. No! I could see why you might ask that though. I'm just a gal that loves shoes and really cannot stand bullying or cruel comments. There are so many real issues to get upset about in this world, I hate seeing people putting their energy into being hurtful to someone. Seems like such a waste of energy. Put that passion into making the world a better place! And for fun, let's enjoy pretty clothes...and shoes! Lots and lots of shoes :)

You totally don't get it. I'm not complaining people saying thin girls aren't as hot as heavier girls at all. The whole idea of putting a bunch of women on a poster to judge their bodies and label one set hotter is objectionable to me.