Judging from the horriblestuff we previously read, we figured that the Junie Browning brawl-and-escape story would either end with the UFC vet triumphantly dragging his broken body into the U.S. Embassy while cleverly disguised as a peasant woman, or his arrest and imprisonment in a dank Midnight Express-style prison cell, or death via infection in the jungle. No, things didn’t look promising for our Lunatik.

Luckily, the latest update to the saga is a happy one, in the sense that Browning is still alive and is being treated well by the police. Like, suspiciously well. Maybe Thailand’s definition of “manhunt” is a lot different than ours, but it seems they just wanted Junie and the dude he scrapped with to get together in a room and talk out their differences. Phuket Wan has the details:

Junie Allen Browning visited a police station on Phuket late today in the latest twist to the American fugitive fighter’s battle to tell his side of a brawl that started in a bar and continued at a local hospital. Browning’s surprise appearance with his girlfriend Laura came at the Chalong Police Station in southern Phuket. At the police station at the same time were others who participated in a now-notorious Phuket brawl.

The wounds inflicted in Browning’s fight with tourists and staff 10 days ago at a bar on Phuket and in Patong Hospital, where the injured were all taken, were real. However, the varying accounts of what actually took place and who was the aggressor leave the facts yet to be decided.

It is believed Browning opted to go to police after he or perhaps his family and friends read an article in Phuketwan in which American Denny Bowman, a Phuket resident and a warden with the US Embassy, suggested that Browning ”surrender.’‘

None of the people involved in the brawl were held by police tonight. However, the first attempt to mediate a settlement failed when the respective parties declined to sit down to talk.

The dispute between Browning and the others who were injured in the brawl leaves police with differing accounts of the rights and wrongs of the events. Several other people, including the owner of the Native bar, who was there tonight with her Australian husband, have already lodged their accounts with police.

If both sides continue to claim they were wronged, the process could be extended. Rather than pick and choose who is telling the truth, officers are likely to continue to try to conduct a mediation session aimed at finding a compromise.

It could be that Browning may be asked to pay for the hospital treatment of the others involved, and damage at the bar. Browning in turn may seek compensation for his injuries. A quick settlement would allow all the people involved to resume their normal lives without concern about charges and a criminal case being brought.

*****

Sounds simple enough, except that the main guy Browning is beefing with, Australian bar-owner Simon Menzies, is not a reasonable man. If you’ll recall, Menzies once threatened to blow up a plane when they stopped serving him booze. And according to a follow-up report on Phuket Wan, he’s still very salty about the entire incident. Here’s an excerpt:

[Menzies and Browning] visited a Phuket police station yesterday, still walking wounded from their encounter at the Native Bar in Phuket’s beachside Karon district, a violent encounter that continued later at a local hospital. Mr Menzies yesterday showed Phuketwan the back brace he is wearing, and the 18 stitches in one hand, along with a leg wound that is home to five stitches.

The tall Aussie went to Chalong Police Station with his Thai wife, Sukanya Sisomboon, 25, who had eight stitches in a finger. Yesterday it was strictly shadow-boxing as both parties in the now-notorious brawl that spread from the bar to Patong Hospital met with police…Mr Menzies told police he did not wish to mediate a solution. The biggest point of difference in the two accounts of how the birthday party went wrong centres on which man threw the first punch…

The men did not know each other before that Sunday night but the Brownings had been invited to [Menzies's] birthday party by a mutual friend, Maryjane Castro…The Brownings say that Junie and Menzies didn’t get on from the beginning at the birthday party. Mr Menzies interrupted a conversation between Junie and Ms Castro and the fight began.

Browning’s girlfriend Laura says that only expats were involved, and that she was punched and bruised as beer bottles were broken and the fight escalated. Mr Menzies and his wife tell a different story. He says Browning and Ms Castro were arguing outside the bar. When he interrupted and told them to enjoy themselves, Browning started the fight, Mr Menzies says. Taxi drivers from a nearby cab rank dragged Mr Browning away three times, but each time he came back fighting, Mr Menzies told police.

Whether the two men will eventually settle for mediation remains undetermined at this stage.

Cagepotato Comments

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LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - "Mission: Impossible" star Jeremy Renner emerged unscathed from a bar fight in Thailand, his spokesman said on Thursday, but a hotel manager in his party was attacked with an ax.

A spokeswoman for Renner, 40, who also played the lead in Oscar-winning Iraq war movie "The Hurt Locker", denied media reports that the actor was hurt in the bloody incident in the Thai resort of Phuket early on Wednesday.

"Jeremy Renner was indeed in a bar in Phuket Thailand as a vicious attack on a patron took place but was not injured or involved. He exited as the fight took place," Renner's publicist said in a statement.

Mofo- December 24, 2011 at 9:43 pm

@Macready - WOW. Thanks for the great stories. That shit is fiz-nucked. Fuck now I don't really wanna go to Thailand.
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I'll stick with my dreams of hitting Rio. I hear there's trannies there too but shit, there's no mistaking a woman when they've got a massive Brazilian dump truck for an ass.
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I'll also go back back to DR and Puerto Rico but without my girlfriend this fucking time! And I have family in Costa Rica so that should be sweet too. I work too fuckin hard, I'm gonna get some immoral sex tour shit on.

BEricMMA- December 23, 2011 at 2:13 pm

Yup the guy who said "back braces and cuts on the hand don't trump severe head wounds" hit it on the head. Imagine being beaten within an inch of your life and being told that the mob was hunting for you. That was the man hunt. The dirtbag who attacked Junie definitely got punched a few times, Junie's a pro fighter though we can discuss the merits all day long about how good he's been, he held his own before he got taken down, stabbed and beaten.

I'm just glad he'll be okay and hope he comes back to the states and quits drinking because it doesn't agree with him. There are plenty of bad drunks out there, if he kicks the booze, he has a lot of untapped potential.

SnackDaddy- December 22, 2011 at 11:32 pm

Put them on the first boat back to their respective countries. End of story.

El Guapo- December 22, 2011 at 11:20 pm

Am I good or am I good? (silence)
Huh? (crickets)
I want pictures!(tumbleweed rolls by)

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 9:53 pm

Haha, I'll try to react more appropriately in the future. I guess I think that the people who are my peers will see it for what it is. Everybody else . . . I don't care so much.

dranokills- December 22, 2011 at 9:04 pm

I woulda rinsed my mouth out with my own brains if I swapped spit with a dude in drag.
fuck man....I would NOT have told that story. I don't care how you slice that shit, you got GAY-ed.
You shoulda manned up and kicked him in the puss-balls.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 7:20 pm

After I told 'her' thanks but no thanks but continued hanging out, she had a total crush on me and kept flirting and trying to dance with me. I didn't care, though. I'm a 6'1", 205# trained guy, TEN of those ladyboys couldn't get me to do a damn thing I don't want to do. That's how I feel about gay guys that hit on me, too. I just don't care very much. I wish chicks seemed to like me half as much as gays and trannies seem to, LOL.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 7:13 pm

Okay, my story is so pathetic . . . LOL. I had this super nice romantic evening driving this hot chick around on a motorbike from a bar to an awesome outdoor party out in the middle of the jungle, had a real blast . . . Haha, it sounds so bad! Ended up making out with her with some petting - she had great tits, lol - and she told me before I went downstairs. I'm a super open-minded, laid back person so I basically just laughed it off as another crazy ass world travel experience like the time I joined a cult in India . . . That's when she invited me to meet all her actual GIRL friends and other ladyboy friends and we partied for a few days.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 7:05 pm

Haha, oh yeah, one of those ladyboys also had a European boyfriend - I saw a pic of them together - just a normal looking Dutch guy. She SWORE he didn't know she was a ladyboy. She also said it's dangerous - she was pretty severely beaten by a European whom she had fooled for awhile but then caught on. Evidently, he didn't take too kindly to the news that he'd been banging a he.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 7:02 pm

@Mofo . . . OMG, yes.
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It may even be worse than you imagine. I found myself EXTREMELY skeptical about any chick that was too hot or gave me too much attention. Seriously, if they are too hot, they are prolly dudes.
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How fucked up is that? Yeah, they love tricking farangs (non-natives) and they do it often. I hung out with a bunch of thai chicks that also had several lady boys and talked and had fun all night for a few nights on Koh Samui. I was super curious (not in that way - lol) so I asked them a lot of questions. They do hormones to grow real breasts and many of them have had operations to make their genitalia be more 'like' a woman's. The Thai people seem to completely accept them . . . they aren't just weirdos and hookers, a lot of them work normal jobs in society.
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It's whack. Just look for that Adam's Apple but don't bet the house on it, some of them don't have them as far as I could tell. You just have to be really careful about looking at their bone structure. Any breadth to the shoulders, narrowness of hips (but that's a tough one - Thai women tend toward narrowness at the hips, too)or slightly too large of hands or feet is a subtle give away. Again, though, I swear I could still be fooled. There are definitely chicks where you are like, yeah, that's 100% a chick. You just HAVE to stick with those. Lots of foriegners actually look for ladyboys to have sex with though.

Mofo- December 22, 2011 at 3:57 pm

@Mac- What is the DEAL with the lady boys? Are there straight male tourists who wanna mess with that?
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I would loooove to go to Thailand and get down with all those girls, but there's no way in hell I wanna play the Crying Game.
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So do they really just try to make money by fooling dudes? Or are they in high demand for their cock-n-balls?

El Guapo- December 22, 2011 at 3:34 pm

You love something that's pretty pathetic? That's exactly how I feel about a certain somebody here! No matter how much I try, I can't quit him. We're two of a kind, you and I.

MediumRare- December 22, 2011 at 3:24 pm

@bigblockcrx
You can't copy paste these comments motherfucker!
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GTFO

bigblockcrx- December 22, 2011 at 3:09 pm

I love how this site is just copy pasted from others.... Pretty pathetic if you ask me.

dranokills- December 22, 2011 at 3:06 pm

How about a big ol glass of......"who gives a fuck"?

doowm- December 22, 2011 at 2:40 pm

@Mac: aww c'mon man were all cool here!
And whoever is in denial about what a complete and total asshole Junie is OBVIOUSLY never seen any of the TUF series with him in it. Plus the number of other run ins with the authorities in the U.S.! If I had to guess I'd say Menzies story is much closer to what actually happened. Cause no matter how many times Junie pisses and moans about how he was made to look bad on TUF, he obviously gave em a lot of material to work with.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 12:24 pm

LoL - not a chance in hell, my friend.

El Guapo- December 22, 2011 at 11:50 am

^Count the typos.

El Guapo- December 22, 2011 at 11:48 am

"There. That's done."
Au contraire, on frere. It's just the beginning. Now tell me more. And start from the beginning..

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 10:17 am

Mr Guapo, rest assured, my friend, ladyboys WERE involved. They always are. They run shit from the background and pretend like they're all sweet and stupid. I know this from being there. Yes, I was fooled into kissing one. There. That's done now.

Nealio- December 22, 2011 at 9:40 am

I'm sure the logical explanation is Junie used his head and face to smash bottles out of the other people's hands. I mean it totally makes sense now...

El Guapo- December 22, 2011 at 9:39 am

Sooooo no trannies, huh?
Not that I care, but it IS Thailand. Plus drunk tourists. Just thoug.. Nevermind.

Morningwood- December 22, 2011 at 9:32 am

oh, and guilty people think they're smarter then the police all the time. So, they do go into police stations.

Morningwood- December 22, 2011 at 9:31 am

so, why I think Menzies is more truthful is because I think it's more plausible that Junie did keep coming back even after people tried to intervene. Probably the last time he came back they just opened a complete ass kickin on him. I don't doubt his injuries, I just doubt his account of why the beating was as bad as it was. I've said previously no one deserved all of what Junie got, well maybe a cho-mo does but, not just a fight at a bar.

macreadysshack- December 22, 2011 at 9:20 am

@ DizzylittleLord . . . agreed on all fronts except for 'plus junie went into a police station the man is hardly going to do that if hes guilty'
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A guilty person WILL go into a Police station after they've practiced and rehearsed their story a hundred times over several days. And of course, if there's no other way out - which I believe Junie believed - if it had been me, I'd be back in the States or at least in Japan by now. WTF? Doesn't anybody know how to properly flee prosecution anymore?

Dizzylittlelord- December 22, 2011 at 8:54 am

gorgzilla has a hell of a point plus the back brace could easily be a scam we know this dude is a nut job. a compromise is a good solution plus junie went into a police station the man is hardly going to do that if hes guilty

Sloppyspray- December 22, 2011 at 8:50 am

@Morningwood - How do you figure? Both of these guys are loose cannons. If anything the truth is somewhere in between. However, as Gorgzilla pointed out, only one of them had his skull ripped open in multiple locations. Who gives a shit who threw the first punch when only one of the men had life threatening injuries.
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Also, I don't recall Junie being dishonest and skirting responsibility for fucking up previously.
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Seriously though, let these two fight it out to the death 1 on 1 if they're so tough. Then take out the winner so he can rest with knowing he was the toughest of the two and we are rid of both of these scourges.

Gorgzilla- December 22, 2011 at 8:20 am

One guy has cuts in his head, two others in the hands. You don't have to be Dr Grissom to guess who held the broken bottle and the knife.

Morningwood- December 22, 2011 at 7:51 am

hmmm, so Junie wasn't being truthful to the media, go figure. It seems far more likely that Menzies account is more accurate to what happened then Junie's account.