Infamous Tribune reports that Ms Jones has been listed in the Guinness Book of World Records after giving birth at the Harper University Hospital on Tuesday, February 16. She is sad to be the first woman in the world to have children by more than thirteen different men.

“I’m extremely proud to have broken a World Record,” Ms. Jones told reporters. “My mother always told me that I was lazy and worthless, and that I would never accomplish anything in my life. Now, I’ve shown everyone that she was wrong, and that I can even be the best in the world when I put my mind to something. In fact, I’ve just accomplished something that no one had done before!”

Anita Jones says she’s been unlucky with relationships in the past, but she believes that this time she may have found the man of her life.

“I’m good at having babies, but I’m really awful when it comes to picking the fathers of my children. This time, however, I think I’ve learned from my past mistakes. Ramón isn’t like all the jerks I’ve dated before. We’ve been together for almost a year and a half, and I really believe it could work between us.”

Jones’ thirteen other children looked really happy to meet their new sibling at the hospital. They were also said to be filled with joy for their mother, who against all odds had broken a Guinness World Record, and posed happily for the 2017 edition of the book.

The other 13 children at the hospital

After their meeting with Ms. Jones, the representatives of Guinness opened a second investigation concerning the record for the number of child support pensions received by one person. The Detroit native is already the beneficiary of pensions paid by 11 different men, and is involved in two other custody cases, which should proceed before the family court over the next two months.