The single man’s guide to throwing a party

Let’s be honest, single guys don’t throw the best parties. Which is curious, given that single guys throw parties for two reasons: a) to meet girls, or b) to impress a girl they’ve just met. In both cases, guys get it wrong. Either they don’t make enough of an effort or they make too much. Confused? We spell it out

– A few cans of beer, cheap wine, chips and a disorganized iPod are lazy and unimpressive. On the other hand, fresh flowers are effeminate and pretentious.

– Warn your neighbours in advance there’ll be loud music and either invite them or send over a box of brownies to avoid embarrassing late-night bashing on the door.

– Dim the lights, but don’t make the room too dingy. Let the music play soft enough to allow conversation. Play jazz only if you like it. Have mixes ready for cocktails. Buy more ice and lemons than you think you’ll need.

– You’ll need wines in red, white and rosé. Don’t forget Diet Coke.

– Turn on the air-conditioning an hour in advance

– Hire professional caterers, bartenders and wait staff; that way you’re free to mingle and don’t have to entertain people barging into the kitchen (and peeking into a fridge full of stale milk).

– Glassware is important; never imagine that paper cups will do the job with less hassle. This isn't college. No girl has ever been impressed by lazy shortcuts.

– Try to arrange parking in your apartment building or ask your caterer to suggest a valet service. It’ll be worth the price. Don’t let guests drive home drunk; keep the guest room made up and keep aspirin ready by the bedside just in case.