The Next Great White Duke Douchebag

With Josh McRoberts gone, we need a new Duke “big man” to despise. Enter: Kyle Singler, who has all the characteristics of a typical Blue Devil forward. Let’s go over the checklist:

Goofy white dude

High “basketball IQ”

Good “mid-range game”

Lacks “strength” and the “ability to create”

Inflated sense of self-worth

Yep, that’s Singler, and with Duke’s first televised game on ESPN tonight, you can begin the hating process now. Don’t worry if you can’t catch the game though. You might have another chance to see Singler play as only 20 of Duke’s 28 regular season games this year will be nationally televised. If I’ve done my calculations correctly, that means we will be told that Greg Paulus was a high school quarterback no less than 112 times. Which, of course, is why he’s such an amazing point guard.

And in case you’re counting, Duke has 15 more televised games than Maryland, and three more than No. 1 UNC.