Thursday, December 23, 2010

One word I really don't like is reality. Reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or may be thought to be. When most people refer to reality they refer to what they can see.I know there has been a supernatural stir in me to not live realistically, to not live in a way that is safe, secure, promising of success. All of these things mean more from me, more work from me and this is not what I desire.The promises of the King have been instilled within side of me. Kingdom reality.

I have been reminding myself frequently of a week in my life with the Lord when He began to show me the supernatural reality of this world. That what I was viewing as reality, was indeed not. This specific week my mind was being blown internally as the Lord would speak to me while my friends were sick (headache, stomach ache nothing big), showing me that it is something beyond a mere stomach ache that is hurting them, that indeed it is the hand of satan. Ever since I have been stirred up to victory in the face of any illness. I have been undergoing many trials as of late forcing me to face the thoughts of man on this subject, and often feeling defeated. But with the kindness of my Father as I face Him he reminded me what He showed me, to stand strong and not waver in my steps towards His righteousness. I am learning and am sure I will always be learning, but through these failures and reminders such hope gets stirred up in me.

I want to break out of every form of reality, but I know as long as I live on this planet I shall be forced with people who take reality as law, even when they proclaim Jesus as Lord. I know there will be persecutions for living this way, that is a reality that has already been defeated by Jesus and Heaven; desiring to live with my reality as heaven, because in that reality Jesus always has victory. Always, without fail.

I am called to defeat reality.to always give and not refuse to borrow. Matthew 5:43to love my enemies and those who persecute me." 5:44to not lay myself treasures on earth, but in heaven. " 6:19to not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will be anxious about itself. " 6:34to not judge, for with that judgement I will be judged. " 7:1to ask, know it will be given me, seek and I will find, knock, and it will be opened. " 7:7

Still, I am learning. I am excited to admit that I am weak. That I get to learn, lean, trust, hope in the Almighty God. That Jesus always grows larger as my hunger for him increases. That I fail, that Jesus never fails.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

I desire to have something to say, but the more I try to find something... the less I have to say.

Everytime I get in the quiet place, I think... "oh! wouldn't someone else love to hear that!" Then I get to the point of sitting down and writing it out and it loses its gumption.

What I'm learning is that I was made for love. Having a voice isn't what I'm meant to have. Christ is what I get, what I have dwelling in me. The paper doesn't contain the words I hear because they are so sweetly and soley for me that they are not able to be spoken. Words are emotionless, the Holy Spirit is the revealer of the deeper things in words. So rather then living to spread a word, I shall live to spread the Spirit, to embody every moment of glory in the quite and release that moment to the constant buzz of the world.

Friday, October 1, 2010

This picture that is the banner of my blog isn't just any ol' sunset.It is a reminder to me, that when we pray, in our meekest moments, God opens the heavens.

Two summers ago I worked at a lovely camp out in Deerwood, MN. This specific thursday afternoon I was lifeguarding, no one was coming down to swim because this week had been gloomy. Sitting out on my raft, staring at the amazing scenery around me I so desired to see a sunset, to have a sunset canoe paddle. So, from my desire, I asked God fora susnet. About 40 min later open swim was closed and on my way in I asked the head lifeguard if she thought there was any hope in having a sunset that night to take the campers out on the lake. She, with no doubt in her statement, commented on the weather to come and how it was not likely at all.

So I went ahead and planned to play sand volleyball with the youth instead of canoe. Fast forward to our evening game of volleyball. Somewhere in the middle of our game I'm on the sidelines getting lost in conversation with the tree's and grass when I look to the sky, and in awe begin to admire the lovely colors of the sky. When i realize..the sky.... is colorfull!?!? Immediately I realzie what has happened, yell for all the campers to stop playing and go change and meet me down at the boat house.

It was deffinetly a throne room moment. When I realized that God has parted the skies for us. So on our canoes we paddled out to the middle of the lake. Where we all stared in awe of the beauty that we had been given. Huddling the canoes together, I began to speak a word to these campers, and at some point mentioning that I had prayed for this sunset and as soon as I said this, most of them began noting how sweet is was that God HAD answered my prayers, their faith deffineitly lifted mine up at that moment opening my eyes to the significant beauty that had been given to us. All around the lake, we could see for miles, were the dark clouds that you can see around where they had parted. The clouds had literally parted perfectly over the camp and stopped not to far above where the photo shows.

If only I had the faith to pray for a sight the size of a sunset every day.May I pray as you say.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

a very large part of my wants to be friends with so many people,to reach out and love my sisters and brothers, to allow people to see who i am. constantly i am broken into peices as i sit, stare and gawk at the relationships that are forming around me.everyday i realzie how much i was not born into this world, that in my newness i was born into a world that is very much separate fromfrom who i now am.in these moments of realization i couldn't be more happy, feel more full,know that i am complete when i shut my eyes and allow myself to escape intothe only relationship worthy of every moment of my time.i've been allowed to see the heart of women, of men of myself. to know that when i just want toshreek about the glorious relationship i have that many, often myself, will look at me oddly,question my love with scripture, urge me to examine myself.psht, i say. i'm going to go absolute, insanely so far out there crazy.as i humble myself in admitting my own pride, inability and lack of friends.as i cling to the one who gave it all, for me, who has equipped me for each moment,who desires to know me utmostly.so i dare to pray to know God like Adam knew God.because you will always let me down.you, woman, will never listen to me as much as i need to be listened to.you, teacher, will never allow me to do as my heart fully desires.you, husband, will spit in my face when i most needed a kiss.you, human, man and woman.

"i've tasted Your glory, and i left it there,you poured out Your mercy,and i didn't care.still You loved me.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

i'm so glad i get to meet Johnny Cash one day.

"I, as a believer that Jesus of Nazareth, a Jew, the Christ of the Greeks, was Anotinted One

of God (born of the seed of David, upon faith as Abraham had faith, and it was accounted to him for righteousness), am grafted onto the true vine, and am one of the heirs of God's covenant with Isreal"

Monday, September 6, 2010

I'm glad to know love.To feel the presence of love sitting by my side.I want so desperately to know who I am. To spew out the words that are given to me, to behold the glory that is been placed upon me. So often I feel shame in being who I am, but when I'm alone, in the space between my eye's and eyelids I feel so free. Every tear that creeps out, may they show the reflection of what is going on inside, may they release and set free the captive one that has been harboring. The one Holy in being, precious in presence, gentle in his abiding yolk, may He be revealed, may He be allowed to speak, may He move the mountains. May He stain the aged, worn, becoming, beloved, undeserving folk from youth to worn. May He be allowed in the space between your eye's and eyelids. Don't be afraid to blink. For there is no amount of darkness that can overcome the light.I'm so glad to know Love.May I know it more.You too.

Monday, August 16, 2010

She prefers me to call her my, "lifepartner".... but not in those kinda connotations, "I'll be your partner in Christ... not crime, but Christ!"

"Brooke! remind me never agian to go to that Chinese!"

These are all things she has JUST said to me...

This is who I get to live with. Wide smile, big eyes, craazzy hair. I love her.

Why is she seventy-six years old? (you may ask)

"Because I like the idea of being on a potch in an old rocking chair, screaming at the birds and children"- Beth (in love.. all old people scream, they can't hear well enough)- my own addition

Then she has random revelations on actually being seventy-six and how I will be bringing her prune cookies to prevent the intestinal difficulties that comes with old age.

So really, I just couldn't think of anything to blog about....I mean if Beth wasn't here yacking, in her truely lovely yackin' abilites that I am constantly being blessed by, I may have been able to find something to deeply speak about.

Yup, I thought that I would actually try to post something once a month since I started and I seriously used to be a legit writer- I suppose if it's meant to reveal itself again it will, in time and in God's glorious will.

Well, Beth is littlerally bug zappin' me via noises to pull me out of the computer.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Everyday I realize how unique each one of us truely isand how important it is to honor each ones uniqueness.

When honor is omitted, problems occur:

1) The person who is not being honored is not going to feelconfident to be who God made them to be.

2) The person who is not honoring is also going to have a reallyhard time finding out who they are in Christ.

Main point: God is being put out by our inability to be comfortable with ourgifted bro's and sis's.

1 Peter 2:16-17"Live as free men, yet without using your freedom as a pretext for evil; but live as servants of God. Honor all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear Good. Honor the emperor."

I heard in a teaching that the emperor Peter is choosing to honor here, is the one who killed him.

Blessed are the poor, Blessed are those who mourn, Blessed are the meek, Blessed are those who hunger and thrist for righteousness, blessed are the merciful, Blessed are the pure in heart, Belssed are the peacemakers, Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, Blessed are you when men revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil agains you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so men persecutes the prophets who were before you. Matthew 5:3-13 "The Beatitudes."

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Remember those days when you justcan'tseemtohearwhat anyone is saying, people start chuckling... your brain starts listening less. Good, because your experience(s) can help you understand a revelation I had today at work.

I think I was probably one of those days where I am just lost in my mind, trying to connect the dots to an end. Well, near the end of the work day I had yet another, "what did you just say?" moment. This one happened to really catch my attention as I was scrubbing a few dishes and realized I thought I heard one of my coworkers say, "this takes four arms to do." Now oddly enough I have had many a "ahhh" moments at the deli sink and here was another.In my brain, as I was asking my coworker what she had just said, God began shouting...

"are you listening?!".I stoped and let Him speak.

I realized, as I actually have for awhile now, but more clearly today that I wasn't, that in trying to find out what I was to do with my summer, my future, my tomorrow and next wednesday... I wasn't listening too well. God speaks. The world... well, the world doesn't speak as gently as Him.

Pause.

It's crazy how simple the things that are being spoken to us are, once we truely listen.