It Helps To Have a Writing Partner Who Can Kick Your Writing Ass

6

Wanted: A writing partner who can kick my lazy, procrastinating writer’s ass. Must: Thrive on deadlines, and be willing to offer up honest and constructive criticism, while still being mindful of my multitudinous neuroses, my overwrought sensitivity, and my blind, codependent love affair with my own words. Should enjoy: Caffeine addiction, cats, serial commas, fuzzy pants, Slankets, and dance breaks. Must have a zero-tolerance policy for: Auto DMs, Foursquare, and checking one’s smartphone while in the company of others.

Interested? For the love of god, please e-mail me. Like, right now.

I wrote it after reading Adair Lara’s Naked, Drunk, and Writing. (Note: I fell madly in love with this book after only a single paragraph, and have since resisted the urge to dog-ear just about every single by-god page.)

Not only did it remind me of what I was missing in my writing life (I need to be doing a lot less listicles and a lot more personal essays), but it also made me remember how good it once felt to have a writer’s group.

And it made me realize that even a single writing partner may just be the thing I needed to revitalize my writing. Because if there’s one thing I was lacking, it was accountability.

I’ve written about accountability in the past, and the various places you can go to find it.

But just to review, accountability is magic. And glitter. And kittens. And (double) rainbows. It’s the type of thing that can get you writing every day, meeting deadlines, achieving dreams, and taking over the world.

It can also lead to you earning enough money to buy pretty dresses.

All without selling your soul. (See: black magic.)

Without accountability, it can be reeeaally easy to just spend your days watching DVR’d episodes of Tabatha’s Salon Takeover, snacking on croutons (shut up; there was nothing else in the pantry), playing Zuma Blitz on Facebook, and ordering out-of-season Candy Cane Kisses on Amazon.

And accomplishing nothing.

If you have no trouble cranking out Pulitzer Prize-worthy sentences on a daily basis without anyone else’s help, kudos to you. I bow down before your greatness.

But if you’re struggling to get those words on the page… if you’re feeling stuck… if you’ve been procrastinating… consider a writing partner.