Hamptons Subway Newsletter Week of December 6–12, 2012

Harry Hurt, the author and TV personality, was seen on the Hamptons Subway traveling from Sag Harbor to Noyac. He was on his way to a Christmas party, he said.

Also seen on the subway platform in Sag Harbor was Old Man McGumbus, 104. He seemed uncertain of where he wanted to go when we asked him. But he was carrying his rifle. He’s the only person on the East End permitted to carry a firearm on the Hamptons Subway.

NEW RECORD FOR RIDERSHIP SET

For the first time out of season—“out of season” is defined in the Hamptons Subway manual as November 1 to April 1—the number of ridership miles for the week exceeded 100,000. When it became apparent on Sunday at 11:52 p.m. that this milestone was being approached, headquarters officials in Hampton Bays, staying late to see if it would happen, ordered token booth operators to ask all riders if any one of them would stay on past his station and then double back. At 11:58 p.m., we got an agreement with one passenger to do so, and instead of his getting off at Water Mill, he continued on to Southampton and then came back to Water Mill, and that pushed it over the top. He has asked that his name not be used because he is embarrassed to have done that and thinks his friends will laugh at him for having done so. We honor this request, of course.

APPRENTICES

Due to budget restrictions, beginning Dec. 7, and through to Jan. 2, many of our subway trains will be driven by apprentices rather than motormen. You should not notice the difference.

The apprentices are not to be allowed to work as motormen unless they have at least six months experience in their apprenticeship, but during this period, if you notice anything not quite right—a subway train going too fast or banging into the one in front of it—be sure to promptly bring this to the attention of a token booth collector, if there is one at the station where you get off.

LOST AND FOUND

Harold Weisenstein of Water Mill reports that he went from East Hampton to Amagansett carrying a sack of six baby alligators. When he got up to the street in Amagansett, however, there were only five. If you see the sixth alligator anywhere in the subway, please report him (it, her) to the nearest token booth operator if you can find one.

SUBWAY DOOR DIMENSIONS

Riders bringing Christmas presents from the stores onto the subway cars should take note that the subway car doors only open to 5’ 6” wide and 6’ 2” inches high. Presents larger than that will not be permitted onto the cars, and those carrying presents they are not quite sure about will only have 30 seconds extra to see if they can be made to fit before the doors slide closed.

COMMISSIONER ASPINALL’S MESSAGE

Things seem to be running smoothly during the last few days, which is quite unusual. Any suggestions about how we might be running the subway better are welcome. Just send them by mail to me at: