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Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The Messy Project, to me, is more than wearing the same item as five girls & accessorizing it differently. It's also about creating & boosting self esteem. I can't tell you how much I've worried about not being able to 'fit' into the item or if my fashion taste would 'ruin the reveal' for being different. I struggle with my weight & worry that I can't wear some of the items you see plastered all over the stores & pinerest. This project was so much fun & gave me confidence to go outside my 'fashion' box!!

Once the 'item' had arrived my mind whirled with different ideas for the reveal. I'm not one to usually worry about accessories & color combinations. I'm a simple housewife that you can normally find in shorts and a tank or a simple maxi dress with flip flops. The chance to wear something I would never pick for myself & my own personality too was awesome!!!! I loved that Kelly was always available to answer question or to help you brain storm. I loved this project! I loved how it created a significant boost in confidence & it made me realize I have a hardcore Love for heels! I encourage each & everyone one of you to sign up for a future "Messy Project" & I can also guarantee you'll see me on one of these reveals again!!!

Now to reveal & talk about the awesome item we received:
We got a beautiful Xtran lace & tulle black dress!
I think the tulle skirt was my absolute favorite part of this dress!
I left the dress exactly as it came but just added a few accessories to make it my own.

I paired this beautiful dress with:
~ a body slip from Target
~ a hot pink skinny belt from amazon.com

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

I'm sitting here with my cup of coffee - trying to talk myself out of reheating the leftover lasagna - before heading to my Dr's appointment. Not alot to really talk about today but two things happened this week that I'd like to share - both are kinda big to me.

Before I jump on my stuff - OMG I'm so excited we got to see the Royal Baby on TV!! How freakin' cool is that?! I mean we will get to watch this little guy grow up & to me it was so cool that the public was included as much as we were!! I'm also so thrilled that they followed the late Princess Diana's footsteps with the birthing in a hospital and the intro on the steps of the hospital! I would also like to say that I am thrilled that I was wrong in my guess of gender.. so thrilled it's a boy!!! Can't wait to find out what his ridiculously long name will be!!!
******

1. I started running! Seriously. The hubby & I got up and headed to the gym and ended up running around base.... ok well he was more or less dragging me.. I downloading these awesome apps called "MapMyRun" and "MapMyFitness" .. Love them! {Feel free to follow me; my screen name is AmyP846!} Monday it didn't record due to a husband error but today I tracked my 2.05 mile jog. I say jog instead of run because I think a turtle passed me while on the track.. just sayin'. The important things are ~ I got up at 4:30am and went to 'jog' around the base with my husband, completing 2.05 miles!!!

Now nobody ever explained to me how much running actually hurts. I. AM. SORE. My 'jog' on Monday was so pathetic - but I am so proud of myself for going again and completed the 2.05 miles. (hehe) After both jogs we did a half mile cool down walk and then I did 1 mile on the elliptical while the hubby showered n stuff. Ok Ok Ok you get it.. I'm so proud of myself & excited that I've gotten this far. My hubby was proud that I only walked one lap and 2/3rds of another lap during the whole (here it comes again) 2.05 mile jog!!

2. The RE's office called to follow up on the blood work I had done on the 12th. Basically the nurse stated that my blood work came back perfect. Both her & the DR were so surprised because we all expected something to be flagged. As of right now no medications for ovulation, or anything else, will be prescribed because my body is doing what it's supposed to do. *high five!* I have honestly been so speechless over all of this! I really waited to share this just in case they called me back to tell me the files got mixed up or something. I mean my PCOS is gone, my ovulation issues are gone.. my LH surge is awesome (4.9) and my FSH is good (5.1) just - WOW!!

The hubby has his 'swimmer' test on the 1st of August & I have my SIS on the 13th of August.. after which time we will be able to narrow down our direction or path. As long as the hubby checks out - which he will... it sounds like it will just take more time, but possible. I'm on the pill until August 14th & they have already given me prenatals to take (which I'll start taking during my ovulation week). Starting to get really excited and allow myself to believe that we are really really close to having a baby!!

Well I've got to head to my appointment. As sore as I am, I'm so excited that things are working out right now! I'm so excited that I have two positive things to share with everyone this week.. hope everyone else is having a great week too!!

Sunday, July 21, 2013

hoping everyone had a great weekend. It is an overcast weekend here in San Diego and I'm loving it! After a constant three weeks of 'go go go' ~ the hubby & I are enjoying lounging around our silent house. Yesterday we stayed in bed or on the couch ALL day. I think we took a total of three naps.. not kidding!

I had my best friends nieces and nephew all last week, and I'm exhausted. We had a ton of fun which included swimming at the hotel pool and a drive in movie to watch Despicable Me 2. The kiddo's are 3, 8, and 12 - needless to say by Thursday I was so exhausted that I almost cried when their Mom said she wasn't going to 'school' on Friday. My hat goes off to all your Mommy's.. I have no idea where ya'll muster all that energy from. :)

Friday morning I was a good day. I got up and got to enjoy a pot of coffee & get some chores done. I also got a phone call from the Dr's office to schedule Mr P's sperm analysis (Aug 1st)!! They way this is working out is that by Aug 13th, the day I have my SIS scheduled, we will have all our information in. Our blood work will be completed, the analysis results will be in & we will get a full view of my uterus and tubes! Our plan of action from there will give us the best road map yet and I'm so excited!!

Tomorrow morning I am planning on starting to workout again.. and again I'm excited. I'm so ready to regain my energy & get back into a routine. I miss my early morning routines. Lately I've just been getting up whenever & just floating around the house. No energy to do anything. Plus it's that time of year when our house is SO HOT that you sweat just sitting up.. adding to more laziness.

Now that the bestie is home from her awesome 'adult' vacation, I am anxious to skype with her. I also have three Dr's appointments this week; including a dental appointment. I should also be getting our awesome 'item' for the "Messy Project" this week too!! Only two more week until I get to show off this awesome 'item'!!!! I am very excited on the awesome 'item' Kelly picked out & to be apart of the Messy Project!! I hope this encourages other people to sign up with her & be apart of this too!! I'm sure I'll be requesting to do this again, if she'll let me. :D

Thursday, July 18, 2013

This am I am sitting at a hotel waiting on The kiddos to wake up. This week has gone by so fast!! More on that later though.

Tuesday I had an appointment with my PCM ( primary care doctor) to talk about my fertility (RE) appointment last Friday. I was surprised that he was so up to date on my charts and in the loop with all the other Drs.. He told me that he was on a phone call agreeing that surgery wasn't a good option - right now. He explained that people always think surgery is the answer until its done - then it becomes a huge regret. He also said that by doing the surgery "could" create scar tissue in the uterus; leading to much worse issues and that is why it was declined. I also got the green light to start working out again - and that made everything better.

I started taking the birth control pills and my SIS appointment is August 13th. According to my PCM the saline will clean out my tubes and allow the RE to see both my tubes and uterus much clearer then the HSG. Of course Mr P's words of wisdom helped too - I DO tend to fight with my Drs plans of action. I DO get upset and complain that it's wrong and I DO need to trust that they have my best interest at heart. I don't feel that the RE is blowing smoke up my skirt and I was shocked that he changed all the plans we already had in place. I am not saying that i am 100% happy about all of this but I will say that I am swallowing my hesitations and trusting this will go good.

I weighed in at the RE's and the PCM's office and was so upset to see that I have gained ALL my weight back! Omg I was really ticked off that I am back to square one - but maybe that's good thing. I am going to try really hard to share all my fertility frustration with the gym. Mr. P and I have already made plans for the gym Monday and I am super excited. So if you are following me through my weight loss then check the " working out" tab at the top Monday to follow me. I will be posting
monthly measurements, weekly weigh ins and possibly monthly progress pictures. I have already posted my monthly goal for July and since I wasn't able to workout - it will be carried over into August.

I really appreciate the support from everyone. This is so hard for me and I fight daily with the choices that I make for my future family. I am in a constant battle with my body to do what it was designed to do. I have come SO far comparing the past 8 years to now. The fact at my body ovulated, the fact that PCOS has been removed from diagnosis and the fact that my levels are where they should be - is amazing!! I am going to be honest and say that I am really giving myself another couple of years for this dream to happen. I can't keep doing this to myself and to my family - the stress is so overwhelming at times. Although I know I'm not alone at times I feel that I am.

My best friend had knee surgery yesterday and I am happy to say there was less damage then they thought!! The surgeon removed a chunk of his patella and no ligament damage was found. Hopefully this leads to a quick recovery and we find out in 15 days if he gets to keep his San Diego orders - fingers crossed!!

Ok it's almost 9am and I gotta wake these kiddos up if we are going to make it to the free breakfast. I will write more later

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Now that I've calmed down & stopped crying long enough - I think I can write this post. Bare with me.

Yesterday I met with my "Fertility Dr" on base, and since Mr P couldn't make it - I went solo. I was so nervous that they took my blood pressure three times. After doing my vitals I met with the Dr's aide (I guess is what you call her) who asked me a TON of questions. She looked over the documents that I brought with me and talked about the visit I had with the awesome Dr in the dysplasia clinic. We went over my blood work from two weeks ago & she stated that I ovulate on my own. She stated that the readings said that I ovulated normally giving me a 4.9 and a 5.1. I still don't know what those numbers mean exactly - but I was so deliriously happy that I ovulate on my own that I didn't really care.

What seemed like an hour later I met with the Dr - a very old man who was abrupt and quick to the points.He introduced himself and started off with "today we are entering you and your husband on the IVF waiting list. As soon as you leave here go next door and start the needed blood work - your husband will have to do the same as soon as possible." I started bawling.. No seriously.. bawling my eyes out. I was so confused ~ if I ovulate on my own then why were they adding us to the IVF list??! He went on to say that they weren't doing a HSG (dye test) but an SIS (saline tubal perfusion test) and was putting me on at least two months of birth control pills (which I call failure pills). I started crying again after hearing the words 'birth control pills'. When I asked him about this uterine polyp/ fibroid mass that is invading my uterus he simply said "i declined your surgery - you don't need it. You just had an ultrasound so for now I just want to monitor it and hope it comes out on it's own" More crying. 'As soon as you spouse can get his blood work done the faster we can move forward. After the SIS is completed I'll put you on a injection that you'll take to help stimulate your ovulation' Why do I need a stimulant to help me ovulate if the blood work showed I was doing it on my own? 'because you need the help now if that doesn't work then we'll move right into a IUI (artificial insemination) but we need your spouses blood work before hand or we can't more forward. Also you were put on the IVF list in case all of this fails and we don't want to wait 15 months so I am putting you on it now to hold a spot' It will also cost you are you husband $3,000 out of pocket - if we get to that point - just so you know.

I was done with this old man & I was done with this visit! I don't care how long he'd been doing this he made me feel like I couldn't accomplish a pregnancy without a IVF and that is wrong!!
By the end of my twenty minutes I had a headache and swollen eyes - along with mascara streaks down my cheeks. I was confused and angry but I did my 7 vials of blood work anyway. Which by the way was full of women getting validation of their pregnancy. I went and waiting on my prescription to be filled at the pharmacy (never doing that again). I left an hour later with a ticket for my prescription that could be picked up in a hour. I needed to go pick up my brother from base & then it would be ready anyway. On the way to my car I was getting crazy looks because I didn't care that tears were rolling down my face. I didn't care that I was sobbing at moments and had makeup all over my face. I didn't care that I didn't even cover my eyes with my sunglasses.. I just didn't care. The moment my brother saw me he said "what is wrong!! i've never seen you cry before, Amy what is wrong?" It all just came out - one blubbering sentence after another. I told him "the Dr came me failure pills and put me on the IVF 15 month waiting list ~ He denied my surgery and I don't know what to do but this is all wrong!!" We pulled over because crying and driving don't go hand in hand & he drove me back to base to get my 'failure pills' & a free bottle of prenatal vitamins.

He tried to make small talk as we drove in the 5pm traffic. Once we got home Mr. P took one look at me & said the same thing my brother did "what is wrong!! i've never seen you cry before, Amy what is wrong?" By the time I got all my words out - which stung the air because my hurt was now anger - my husband had a phone in his hand. Calling the Tricare hotline wanting to know how we get a second opinion. The anger in his voice and the concern in his eyes was enough to make the tears start flowing again. As he pulled me to him & said "I'm not letting this thing stay in you & you aren't taking those 'failure pills' as you call them either. We will go first thing Monday and find another Dr who will listen even if I have to go above his head all the way up his chain of command. I promise that I will never miss another one of your visits.. these are a priority. The last two Dr's wanted you have surgery right away & he declined the surgery.. not good enough.. not good enough at all." I walked away to hear him ask the after hours operator how we go about getting a 2nd opinion through the Navy.

My brother called his wife & asked how she did it - getting a 2nd opinion when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. I heard my brother & husband say that "after this all drs will agree with his diagnosis.. it will be a fight now to get that surgery".. more tears.

At the end of the day I found that I need to contact my Primary Care Manager aka PCM & tell him what was going on. He is the one to help me through whatever I need & I needed his help in getting a 2nd opinion. I have looked up all kinds of information on the uterine polyp and fibroid mass - wondering if they could in fact come out on their own. I was humbled by the compassion of my husband and the level of support with my brother & sister in law. I'm not a cry baby & I'm not against IVF ~ I just knew that it wasn't the 'plan of action' for me. I just felt this Dr was a 'IVF' hungry man - meaning he only wanted to do the IVF's instead of exhausting all my needed concerns. This thing has bloated my stomach to make me look 3 months pregnant & not it's started to cause me pain. Although I'm not in a total disagreement with everything he said I'm left wondering if I should follow his "POA" until I find a 2nd opinion. The birth control pill won't hurt me, since I can't get pregnant with this mass in me anyway.. but it not what I expected to hear. I've never thought of myself as needed an IVF but i understand that if I did I'd be thankful to be on the list already. Hopefully I can get answers this coming week while having the three little kiddo's.

Friday, July 12, 2013

Yesterday my bestfriend was showing his parents the Hawaiian island when he fell. We got the text that he was in the ER and later saw his sister's facebook post: "Everyone please pray for my brother who just possibly broke his patella, dislocated, and strained/pulled/ripped his ligaments and tendons in his knee while hunting with my dad in Hawaii". Mr. P got a phone called from him asking if this would affect his orders and how this would affect his Navy career. We are really praying that this is will be fixed and that he will still receive his orders. We are also praying that his wife can handle him with his injury and the two small kids. Wish I could fly out to Hawaii & help. I also got news that my 'maid of honor' went to the Dr a couple of months ago to find out she has "Cervical Cancer"! WHAT!! She had a 'chunk' of her cervix removed and they did a scraping of the pre-cancer cells. They told her she would have to come back in a month to make sure it hasn't spread and it's all gone. The next step if it hasn't is to remove her whole cervix! This women has been through so much already, I just wish I could take her pain away. She not only served our country but received severe damage to her knee and shoulder while serving in Iraq. A hummer was hit and the shrapnel from the explosion entered her knee and shoulder - causing multiple surgery's. All she has wanted to go be healthy and have a baby of her own.. and now that is looking slim. Please take a moment and lift my friends in prayer. I also encourage everyone to take a moment and be thankful for your healthy & don't take it for granted. I will be going to the Dr today to get more info on where I stand with my own stuff. I'm excited to meet my new Dr and get this ball rolling. I'm also really praying that they set up a surgery date - since I am starting to have discomfort suddenly. This all seems surreal at the moment. I'm praying my girl gets healthy & that her surgery worked. I'm also praying that my best friend will heal quickly without complications & it won't hinder his Navy career. My heart is so heavy today.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Nothing going on here in SD.. just another drizzly kinda day. I'm already behind on my blog posts for this week and next week I have three kiddo's so I may not be on here as much...

Tomorrow I get to order my Kindle Fire HD from Amazon and I'm so excited! I'm going with the 32GB and I'm just so excited! I have also found a Texas A&M case cover - which is SO cool!! I can't wait to push the 'order' button for these awesome new toys!! I also found a 49ers Ipad Mini case for Mr. P, which he will just love! Do you have Kindle? What things do you do with yours? What is your favorite app? What are some recommendations you can give me????

Since my working out is on hold I'm going cray cray! Seriously... this is so lame. I found these awesome pair of Nike's that I wanted to buy for running and well I can't. I have them picked out from Nike's website & had them customized - like the bestie did. When I went to re-add them to my cart for tomorrows purchase spree - Nike announced that the item is no longer available! WHAT!!! I want to cry!! So now my search must start all over and I'm probably not getting them customized. Boo.

What running shoes do you use? If you are a beginner runner what would you recommend to start out with??? These will only be used for running

That's Ok.. since I have no idea at this point when I'll be able to return to the gym - it's for the best. If you are asking why I'm not at the gym here is why: a good friend of mine (who is a RN) told me that working out puts stress on my benign tumor. Since it is still growing and causing me a ton of discomfort I should not work out and aggravate it. I can twist or move the wrong way causing this little guy to burst.. which could lead to bleeding internally or an emergency surgery. She went on to tell me that it would be the worst instant pain of my life, not to mention case an immediate trip to the ER. Since she told me this in front of Mr. P - all my workout plans have been denied. Double Boo!!

Tomorrow I have my first RE (fertility) appointment on base at 3pm. I'll get the results back from my blood panel (two weeks ago) and I'll get to schedule my D&C to remove this benign tumor. I'm seriously praying it's within the next two weeks because I'm in a lot of pain. Plus I want to return to the gym.. hopefully tomorrow they can tell me what to do from here as far as my workouts and surgery. Fingers crossed it's all good news. The benign tumor is putting a lot of pressure on my lower stomach now, everything I do causes a dull pressure / pain. Not to mention that my stomach has gotten larger (on one side) making me look preggo and my clothes to fit weird. It's also starting to interfere with my sex life - considering I feel so much pressure when we tango.. so that's been 86'd until they fix me too.

This is the last weekend with my brother in town. Kinda sad. We just got back to talking after 7 months & now he's leaving again. It has been nice to have him around. I love the fact that him & Mr. P are such good friends - this makes it so much easier. I also have enjoyed someone here who helps out and shows the other boys how to help out. I'm going to miss the extra help & the constant back up . I have no idea what we are doing considering I'm trying to take it easy before next week. I have no idea how I'm going to handle three active kiddo's when I can barely mop the floor - but hopefully all my 'playdates' will keep their promises and I'll have backup.

I'm nervous about all the changes about to happen - since I don't like change. From surgery, to all our roomies moving out, to getting back into a routine.. everything we currently know is about to change. It's scary but as I look ahead I'm so excited. I can't wait for my best friend and his family to be back here in SD! I'm even more excited to be sharing a house with them for a awhile - it's just a couple months away. Plus we are will purchasing a new vehicle, going on a road trip to Texas & Arkansas, and we both have birthday's coming up..

Hope everyone has a wonderful Thursday & I will update you on the Dr's appointment as soon as I can. Will be a late post but I'll update you.... Thanks everyone for all your support and advice!

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Some people think that seeing a 'shrink' makes you weak. It's an easy admittance to showing that you are capable of handling your own life. Understanding that 8/10 people who see a psychologist have some major emotional or traumatic issues to workout, and some are just against it for personal or religious reasons. I just want to stand up and shout that I love my therapy sessions! I love having someone who listens and helps me grow. I can see the changes in my life and I can see the growth too.

Now I am one of those people that has had both major emotional and traumatic events happen. I personally have been through a divorce, physical abuse, infertility, mental abuse, sexual assault, and dealt with my bio and adoptive family; these things have landed me a golden ticket to lay on a couch for 45 min a week. The fact that my prior marriage created such doubt, low self esteem and to become a passive pushover; are huge reasons I signed up. I don't like being a person people just advantage of, I also don't like being treated like a slave because I have a v*gina.

Before I changed my whole life and moved to Oklahoma (2001) I was a headstrong, independent, confident women. You couldn't tell me I "couldn't" do something & you would never hear me say the words " I can't". Now I feel that I struggle with that girl to come back into my life, the struggle to gain control over feeling that I lost. I'm in such a better and different place then I was 4 years ago. I'm so happy and so in love with my life. It should have been easy to gain back the control over my life, so I thought. The fact that I was stripped of my self confidence, on punch at a time, and the fact that I'm not a independent women = gives me pause. I don't feel independent in the fact that I don't work outside of my home and I spend my husbands paychecks. I am independent in the fact that I can run my house, run errands, and create a demanding schedule for myself without anyone's assistance.

My progress is not because of therapy visits alone. I will be the first to admit that my blog is a huge help - you reading my post now; have helped me. I will honestly admit that without the strength, honesty and hours from my bestie, bestfriend and two other amazing people in my life I wouldn't be here writing this today. No, not a suicidal kinda thing. My point is through friendships, sounding boards,blog comments, paid listeners.. I've regained a huge chunk of my life back.

This past weekend a room mate, someone I've considered to be a great friend proved my progress. This person asked for another bottle of wine to share with their significant other - since Mr P & were out and passing a liquor store - I stopped. While inside paying for this $7 bottle of wine, he sent a text message to Mr P stating that he would repaid by a dirty picture of his girlfriend. As soon as I got back behind the wheel Mr P shared the text with me - kudo's to Mr. P. The offer was declined but I was furious. How could this person live in my home and offer my husband this?! How foolish was I to think he respected me... wow. Once we arrived, nothing was said - we just went to our room leaving the couple on the couch. The room mate followed us talking about a fan in our room and how we could just use it for the night. Before shutting our door he said "hey bro give me about 20 min and I'll hook you up". I calmly, even though I was shaking, said "if you send my husband any picture your things will be thrown out of this house & if you ever proposition him again you'll be out". Mr P also said that he didn't want the picture and if sent to him - he would go right then and show his girlfriend the level of disrespect he was showing to both women in the house.

Two months ago I would have laughed this off and ignored it while it silently ate through my sole. I would have been so upset and told everyone but the offender how I felt. I am happy to report that in a couple of weeks he will no longer be living here - but sad that I was wrong in his respect for my marriage and myself.

Somewhere out there someone is dealing with thoughts and emotions they can't control or don't understand. I hope that the next time someone shares that they are seeking counseling that it's received in respect. I hope that when your friend calls to talk about a repeated situation that you listen. I hear so many people keep this to themselves, or are mocked because the sought help.. that's a shame. I am just a 31 year old woman who wants control of her life back. My lifestyle as a Navy wife demands it. If I can't make choices now & stand up for myself then I'm going to sink. I feel that sharing my story and struggle will help someone else - at least pick up a phone and talk to a respected friend. Sometimes those who are closest to us are the first to cast judgement - making our battle that much harder.

Monday, July 8, 2013

Hello!
I hope you all had an amazing Independence Day!
The boys were off from the 3rd until the 7th - it seemed longer than just four days!!
Oh man do I have some pictures to share with you!

Wednesday July 3rd:

After cleaning the house and mowing the yard - I put up all my Fourth decorations. As you can see above I placed flags along our walkway - (Target $1 a package - 3 flags per package). We started our fun weekend with a friendly game of 'Life', and my brother won both games! We ended up calling it quits around 2 am.

July 4th:
Some of you may know that this is my favorite holiday ~ and this year was extra special to me, and it was also amazing! We started our day off with a patriotic breakfast:

I used a bisquick recipe for the pancakes and we added food coloring.

After our yummy breakfast, I decided to cut up watermelon & prepare a cooler for that evening. We passed the time by playing 'Water pong'... meaning instead of using beer, we playing beer pong with water. It was a lot of fun and great practice!!

We went to my Sailor's base and watched the show. It was perfect and right off the water. We had the best firework show I've ever seen!!!

Top: Showing off the San Diego skyline before the fireworks started

We got a four part synchronized show right in front of us! We could also see a the "Coronado" show and as we left the base we could see SeaWorlds firework show! We had the best seat in the house! To see exactly how close we were you can watch the video here.

After leaving the base we got home about 10:30 and started a real game of beer pong. It didn't take long before we had other people showing up to join in the fun. Mr. P & I played until 3 am ~ my brother and his friend stayed up until about 5am.

Friday July 5th:
We woke up around 10:30 ish and I made French toast for the guests and us. After eating we decided to run errands. I needed to get my Iphone fixed and Mr P volunteered to go with me. The Iphone tech guy showed me a short cut to use instead of paying the $100 to have the issue fixed and asked us to wait by the ipad mini's while he got some info on the release of the Iphone 5's. Next thing I knew we were paying for a Ipad Mini and we didn't get my phone fixed. So I've been promised the Iphone 5's as soon as it comes out & since I usually get Mr P's used Iphone while he gets the newly released one - this time he promised I get the newly released one. OK.. if you are scratching your head.. let me explain: Mr P bought the Ipad so that he could play an IOS game called "Clash of Clans". Although i use it while he is away from the house, but it is primarily his.

After setting up his new toy - we started another fun night of "beer pong". This time we had even more people come play and we stayed up even longer! I went to bed around 4am, and I have no idea when everyone else stopped playing.

Saturday July 6th:
My brother had weekend duty so he took Mr P's truck and left us for the remaining weekend. The house woke p around 11am and started getting ready for our day. Mr P & I were invited to the USS Gridley swim party that started at 1, but we were asked to be there around noon to help set up. I love the Gridley families, I alway have so much fun with everyone.. it was a blast! The boys played Football in the pool & after played flag football. I don't have any picture of the flag football because I fell asleep .. yep.. I sure did for about an hour.

Next thing I knew we were packing up to head back to the hosts' house and they set up for a couple of games of ... you guessed it... beer pong. Now if you are counting, that is 5 solid days of this game.
After playing for hours we went home * I was the DD* and passed out.

Yesterday we laid around all day guzzling water. A ton of water! I got all the laundry down and the house picked up. We watched a couple of shows from a new TV series called "hero" - which is awesome!! I also ordered my Kindle Fire HD, per Mr. P's request and we ordered some Chinese food. So I can honestly say that I don't plan on playing any beer pong for a minute. We had a wonderful weekend.. full of friends, good food and lots of memories!

I hope everyone had a great weekend too & I can't wait to start reading all about it!!! Now I'm going to just lay here like a bum because I am exhausted! Have a great Monday!!

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Before I start my intended post I would like to openly and publicly apologize to my sister in law for any thing I posted that may have hurt you. My intentions were to share my feelings and my frustrations on situations - not to put you down or to hurt you. Two wrongs do notmake a right and talking about this on a public blog is/was wrong. For that I apologize and promise to keep any and all family drama off the blog. My intentions were never to hurt you. Even though I never thought you'd ever read what I write, I understand that I should never post anything the world can read that I wouldn't want you to see. It was just my way of venting about the pain I've gone through with our whole argument, disagreement ummm.. well whatever the hell this is. Again I'm sorry for not considering your feelings before posting this on a public blog.

A couple of weeks ago I went to Blog2Print and had every single post from the day I started Trials & Triumphs put in this book. I spent $55 (with a 15% code) on a black n white copy. I received my book yesterday & I couldn't be more excited!!!

This is the coolest thing I've ever done! I love how I get to go back and read how much my life has changed. I also love that all my memories and exciting new steps are here too! There i nothing more exciting than seeing your words in a binded book!

I will absolutely do this again if I ever change "Lat N Long" to something else, or the blog takes a new direction.
Highly recommend everyone doing this!

As I was reading through some of my very first posts I realized something huge. At first the posts are so real and raw. Writing for just me, as if it was a journal. As you move forward I start directing my posts to my bestie - just sharing my world to her. Then you start to notice when I picked up all the blog attention.. my posts shifted. They became more geared to the public rather than to myself. Toward the end it became so unbearable to read that I had to stop! A good friend of mine recently changed her blog to a posting without comment options. She wanted her blog to be more of a journal instead of being about views, and stats. I have to say after reading this book and seeing the change in my writing style - I see exactly why it she did it!

"My life isn't all butterflies and rainbows" - I've said it a thousand times. The drama in my life is real and stressful. Blogging became a stress relief - a way to find others going through something like myself. I refuse to be a blog filled with drama just to attract readers. I'd like to continue sharing my life and my trials but my way. A personal blog that shares real everyday situations and no sugar coated dramatic flares.

With this fresh start on "Lat n Long" I'm going to focus more on my fertility battle, weight loss, and being a Navy wife. I'm leaving my family drama out of the blog posts and focusing on positive things.

Again I hope you all join me through this next chapter of events & understand my change of direction.

I appreciate each and every person who has read through this post & who has supported me through all the Trials & Triumphs I've faced. Thank you all for making this blogging experience so important to me & thank you all for your comments! I really appreciate all of it!

I hope everyone has a great day & I hope you are all ready for the Fourth of July!! You know I am.. speaking of which I need to go mow the yard so I can display my yard flags!!! (Picture to come!)