Researchers at the USDA in Oklahoma are coming up with new ideas for producing biofuel from discarded crops, specifically watermelons. Up to 25% of each watermelon crop is lost due to the weather or birds. Rather than shoot the birds in the face (do it, wuss), they’re looking at a non-food use for all these damaged melons:

To produce ethanol, the juice is paired with a small amount of sugar in a vacuum environment. A simple anaerobic metabolism takes place without oxygen. […] The USDA has proposed a vehicle that would fertilize the juice out in the field without even having to harvest the fruit. [WIVB]

A vehicle like that, if it works, would move the biofuel production into the watermelons themselves. You thinking what I’m thinking? That’s right, watermelon molotov cocktails. Vengeance is ours, birds. And once we’re done with that, this is the perfect fuel source for my Watermelon Car. Now, to gas this baby up and run down Gallagher. REVENGE!