OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out, and introduces himself as Sheriff John. He sings his opening song, which should be our motto for the upcoming year:

Laugh and be happy and the world will laugh with you
When people see you smiling they can’t help smiling too
When you look out the window to a dark and gloomy day
Break out a smile and in a while the gloom will go away

So laugh and be happy with a merry melody
A song will make a hat rack look like a Christmas tree
Get rid of worry in a hurry, chase the blues away
Just laugh and be happy all the live…. long….. day..

He then says: Boys and girls, tonight we celebrate the end of the 2006th positive year of the conventional calendar. Please be careful with your buttermilk and cookies tonight, and if you do drink too much, have a designated buddy to see you safely home.

Now, my records show we have a very special birthday boy today. Quite the accomplished author, he consistently is entertaining, and is a really neat person to know. Please join me in singing the Birthday Cake Polka for underpope:

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, and says, “Many years ago, on a PBS station far far away, there was this program called Zoom, and they had an odd little birthday song they sang. Our birthday buckaroo today requested the Zoom! birthday song, so hopefully this is what the partner wanted. friday18, this is for you”. He strums his accordion, and sings:

[Please remember, if you fill out the updated poll in this posting, I can make sure you get the birthday song you want. You should also note that LJ has updated their profile mechanism: you can now enter your birth day and month, but have it hide the specific year (while still providing it to LJ for statistical purposes). So, for those of you with no birthday information in your profile… go update it now. And this means you, friday18, as I had to find out your birthday from rjlippincott]

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and join Sheriff John in singing the Birthday Cake Polka for ellipticcurve… but wait… the Sheriff’s not on today. Instead, we have a funny looking group of three guys, and they are singing:

Once a year we celebrate
With stupid hats and plastic plates
The fact that you were able to make
Another trip around the sun

And the whole clan gathers round
And gifts and laughter do abound
And we let out a joyful sound
And sing that stupid song

Happy birthday!
Now you’re one year older!
Happy birthday!
Your life still isn’t over!
Happy birthday!
You did not accomplish much
But you didn’t die this year
I guess that’s good enough

So let’s drink to your fading health
And hope you don’t remind yourself
The chance of finding fame and wealth
Decrease with every year

Does it feel like you’re doing laps
And eating food and taking naps
And hoping that someday perhaps
Your life will hold some cheer

Happy birthday!
What have you done that matters?
Happy birthday!
You’re starting to get fatter
Happy birthday!
It’s downhill from now on
Try not to remind yourself
Your best years are all gone

If cryogenics were all free
Then you could live like Walt Disney
And live for all eternity
Inside a block of ice

But instead your time is set
This is the only life you get
And though it hasn’t ended yet
Sometimes you wish it might

Happy birthday!
You wish you had more money
Happy birthday!
Your life’s so sad it’s funny
Happy birthday!
How much more can you take?
But your friends are hungry
So just cut the stupid cake

[Please remember, if you fill out the updated poll in this posting, I can make sure you get the birthday song you want. You should also note that LJ has updated their profile mechanism: you can now enter your birth day and month, but have it hide the specific year (while still providing it to LJ for statistical purposes). So, for those of you with no birthday information in your profile… go update it now.]

A little over 3½ years ago, a delightful young woman entered my life, and the life of my family. Starting as just a coworker, she has become “one of the family”, both a peer to us and yet an older sister to our daughter. A friend when we’ve needed her. Although she has her quirks and ideosyncracies, we all love her dearly. She is the reason you’re reading this: she’s the one that introduced me to LJ, and through her, I have met a large number of people who are on my friends list, and who have proven to be really neat people in real life.

Tomorrow is her birthday. Tomorrow the Sheriff will come out and sing her selected birthday song. But I wanted to give an early birthday wish today, and to encourage all of you to join me in wishing her a happy birthday tomorrow.

Happy birthday, ellipticcurve. No matter what they say, we’ll still trust you. [Update: Even if what they say has an off-by-one error :-)]

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform, wearing a Viking hat (horns and all), strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, and says:

I know you’re wondering what happened to my sharp lawman’s cowboy hat. We’ll, in honor of today’s song, I’ve decided to wear a different hat. I’ve also asked the Volga Boatmen to accompany me on this song. This is going out to you, aliza250.

He then clears his throat, takes out his guitar, plucks an “A” note, and then starts singing:

OK, Folks, it’s that time again. Let’s all gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, and says:

Today, we are acknowledging a very special birthday for cahwyguy‘s not-so-little girl, NSS&F, who turns 12 today. So feel free to join me (by adding your comments) as we sing this special version of the Birthday Cake Polka for NSS&F. We’ve baked a special cake for this show, as well.

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, and says, “Yes, this is a little early, for dianec42‘s birthday is tomorrow. But I’m about to saddle up the horse to ride out to Perris to spend some time with my buddy Thomas, so I wanted to get this out before I left. By the way, do you know how you start a horse? You kick-start it!”. He pulls out his accordion, and then starts singing the Birthday Cake Polka for dianec42:

OK, Folks, you know the drill. Allright everyone, let’s gather in front of our large, 13″, Black and White TV set, and watch as a tall, lanky man in a khaki uniform strides out, introduces himself as Sheriff John, pulls out his accordian, and sings:

[Please remember, if you fill out the updated poll in this posting, I can make sure you get the birthday song you want. You should also note that LJ has updated their profile mechanism: you can now enter your birth day and month, but have it hide the specific year (while still providing it to LJ for statistical purposes). So, for those of you with no birthday information in your profile… go update it now.]