All posts by SteffiGrimm

Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth. Not possible, as life changes a person, and we all grow... hopefully for the better. This is an online journal of my thoughts, my findings, and my lessons learned.

There is no such thing as the perfect couple. Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have our problems. It doesn’t matter how much you and your partner love one another; At some point, you are going to face a trouble or two, many of which have the power to cause major damage to your relationship. Perhaps a sister-in-law throws you daggers at every family function, or a promotion keeps you at work more than you’d like. Whatever the issue, it’s how you deal with it that’s important. With that in mind, here are ten common relationship troubles and how to handle them.

Problems With Loved Ones

No one chooses their family, but that fact doesn’t make your life any easier when you come to realize that your partner’s don’t particularly like you. However, instead of focusing on the negatives of the situation, you should try to look for the positives. For example, without these people, you wouldn’t have your partner at all. That being said, if a parent, sibling, or cousin does insist on being rude for no reason, you may want to bring it up with your partner at some point.

Not Enough Time Together

Couples tend to spend a lot of time together, especially when they live with one another. Because of this, when a couple starts to see each other less and less, it can create an upsetting and frustrating situation. To remedy this issue, you should plan time together in advance, and do everything you can to ensure that nothing interrupts your plans. If you’re both very busy, this can be a challenge, but it’s very rarely impossible. You can also text and call each other every day.

Too Much Time Together

That being said, some time apart from one another isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it can be incredibly valuable to a healthy relationship. It’s easy to feel suffocated when you’re with your significant other every minute of the day, so be sure you both plan things to do on your own. This could be to practice a hobby, visit your friends, head to the gym, or anything else you want to do without your partner. Be sure not to contact each other too much during this time, or there isn’t any point.

A Lack Of Trust

The reason some couples spend all of their time together is because of a lack of trust. For one reason or another, they don’t want their partners going off on their own, and so aim to be with them at all times. However, trust is an essential part of any relationship, which means that, if you don’t have any, it will cause problems. To build this trust up, you should both make an effort to be honest and consistent. You should also consider combatting your reasons for this lack of faith.

Insecurities About The Future

No one gets into a relationship planning for it to end. However, when you and your partner are going down different paths, this becomes more and more likely, causing serious insecurity. This is why you should speak to one another and try to find a compromise. For example, if you want children, but your partner has already had a vasectomy, they may be willing to adopt or have a reversal vasectomy to make this possible. There’s no use in worrying until you’ve talked about it.

Frequent Conflicts Concerning Money

Money is a major cause of trouble for most relationships, especially when you and your partner have wildly different spending habits. If you like to save and prepare for the future, but they blow their paycheque the first week of every month, it’s going to cause conflict now and then. Instead of shouting and screaming about it, you should sit down, talk it out, and find a middle ground you’re both happy with. Also, work together to solve money worries, rather than placing blame.

Vices Are An Issue

When you live your life mostly sober, but have a partner that smokes, drinks, or takes drugs regularly, it can make you feel uncomfortable, resulting in a distance and tension between the two of you. Telling your partner to quit is the simple solution to this issue, but they shouldn’t have to change themselves for you, even if their habit is harming their health. They need to want to change for themselves. However, you can ask that they keep their vices away from you.

Putting The Relationship Last

Being in a relationship for a long time can cause couples to take one another for granted. Instead of putting your partner first, like you would have done not so long ago, you start to cancel dates, leave messages unreplied to, and ignore simple requests. This may not seem like that big of a deal to you, but it will to your significant other. While there will be times when something else is genuinely more important, for the most part, you should put your relationship above all else.

Daily Wars About Chores

Some of the biggest arguments in relationships are all because of chores. Of course, when it seems as if you’re doing all of the housework alone, it’s easy to become frustrated, but, instead of blowing up, you should stay cool and have a calm conversation. List every chore in the house that needs to be done and decide between you who wants to do what. If there’s a task neither of you wants, then consider taking it in turns or hiring a professional to do it for you.

The Fun Is Gone

Boredom is a common issue for couples, especially for those that have been with each other for years. However, instead of resigning to a stale life, you should bring up the problem with your significant other. Chances are, they feel the exact same way that you do. If this is true, you should see if you can find any ways to spice things up again. A lot of couples find that going on a date or two is enough to bring back the feelings of the “honeymoon period” of their relationship.

Every relationship has troubles it needs to face. With the advice above, you should be able to deal with a few of the most common ones and get things back on track with your partner.

Is 2019 the year you’re planning the trip of a lifetime? Whether it’s exploring the world with friends or heading to a dream destination with your other half, there’s no doubt that the prospect of clear blue skies and fresh adventures is hugely enticing as we trudge our way through a dreary grey winter at home. But while the dreams are certainly there, are the funds? Going on your travels can be quite pricey, so making plans and saving up is a must for most of us. If you have the will and the commitment, you can make it happen – here’s how…

It’s all too easy to say to yourself that you’re going to save each payday, only to get to the end of the month and find you don’t have any cash left over to save for your trip. So the best thing to do is set up a separate savings account with a standing order for a set amount to come from the account you get paid into. You can also use an app like Moneybox, which lets you combine regular savings amounts with a feature which rounds up the change and saves it on any card purchase. Automate the process as much as possible to avoid the temptation of dipping into your savings for other reasons.

Make A Budget Plan

If you don’t know exactly how much you’re spending then you can’t make savings. So, coming up with a budget plan is vital. Start by looking at your last bank statement and noting down all of your bill amounts, any credit card payments or joint loans for couples you have. The amount left over is your discretionary spend. Look at areas like unused subscriptions you can cancel, or little spending habits like that weekly takeaway that add up. But remember it’s important not to cut out all the run – you’ll only resent it otherwise and end up breaking your spending plan.

Be Smart About Your Bookings

Shop around to find the best possible deals on everything – flights, accommodation, transfers and food. Look at the time of year you’re planning to travel – some places still have beautiful weather outside of the peak travel season when you’re likely to pick up better deals. With flights, if you choose not to fly direct sometimes you can save big with several smaller operators, or by picking less popular flight times. With your accommodation, investigate whether one of the new boutique hostels could be an option. They have sleek design but cost far less than a hotel.

Remind Yourself Why

Saving involves making little sacrifices quite often and sometimes it can be hard to stay on track. So it’s useful to remind yourself of the bigger picture. Try changing your phone wallpaper or your desktop at work to a picture of your dream destination, or start a Pinterest board of holiday outfits that you can look at whenever you feel discouraged. You’ll be sat on that beach before you know it!

As another year is coming towards the end, I wanted to express how thankful I am.

A year in which I have learned what’s important, and who’s important. A year in which I struggled, and I conquered. A year where I doubted myself, but I managed to rise again. A year which thought me to love unconditionally. To do right thing. To let go of those who brought negativity into my life. To let go of those who made me feel miserable. I have learned to focus on what I have, instead of what I don’t.

Instead of recapping this whole year, I will write about the future. There’s so much to look forward to in the coming year.

2019 is the year we have been working towards. The year we have been waiting eagerly for. 2019 is our year! It has a lot of firsts, and a lot of milestones for us. In 2019 I will…

♡ Get married to my soulmate! ♡

I will travel together with my husband-to-be for the first time outside of Europe!

Nothing’s more exciting than moving into your first home with a partner. Whether you’re dating, engaged, or married, this can bring a new dimension to your relationship. Finally, you’ll be able to wake up to that dreamy face every morning. You’ll be able to rest easy that the love of your life will come through that door every night.For these reasons, it’s easy to get carried away the moment discussions about living together start. You may feel so desperate to have him close that you go straight online to look at houses. Within weeks, you’re signing a contract and accepting the keys.Urgency like this is understandable, but it doesn’t always work out. If you don’t discuss particular things before agreeing on a place, the mask could soon start to slip, and you might not like what you see underneath. Even worse, it’ll be too late to walk away.

To make sure that doesn’t happen, there are some essential factors you need to discuss before moving in. For the most part, these are financial. To make sure money doesn’t tear you apart, be sure to ask your partner these financial questions before you move.

The chances are that your finances have been pretty separate until now. You might not have any real idea of how much your partner has to play with. But, this is something you need to know if you’re moving in together. How much they can afford dictates the properties you can consider. If you feel awkward asking straight out, don’t. Just ask how much rent they think they can manage, and be honest about what you can afford too. How is their credit rating?Again, credit ratings are difficult to discuss. This has probably never come up in your relationship, but now is the time. If you’re applying for a rental or a mortgage, your success depends upon decent credit scores. That’s why you need to know if your partner has any issues in this department. It’s better to get these out in the open now than when you fail a check. That way, you can direct them towards resources like this Self Lender review to help build their rating fast. Options like these provide the chance to loan money from yourself. They could see your partner passing credit checks in no time. But, you can’t use them if you don’t ask the question!Are they willing to split the bills?This may seem like an obvious point, but don’t just assume you and your partner will split the bills. Instead, make sure that they would be willing to do this. Some couples settle for one person paying bills, and another paying rent, for example. But, that might complicate things in your first home. Your easiest option, then, is just to split everything down the middle. Make sure your partner is on board with that before ending with an unexpected financial burden which could snap the back of your romance.

Today, while at work, I have attended a focus group regarding change and how to deal with it. This was informative to say the least. In fact, it made me realise how important it is to be positive in life – how to be determined, and to work hard for what you believe in.

In the last few months, a lot has changed in my life:

In summer, I was made redundant. It was a real struggle for me. I have never been in this position before, and I certainly did not see it coming. I was in shock for a number of days, and I could not believe my luck – This could not come at a worse time, with the wedding coming up. After a bit, I had to face the music and started by overhauling my CV. I made sure I got a few good recommendations from some ex-colleagues, and started looking for a job. A month later, I got a job offer which I accepted and here I am.

A new job and a new role later, this means more change and adaptation! Here I was, learning the ropes again. Luckily, I do love change so I took this challenge head on. Four months later, I feel like things are good again and I am settling in nicely.

Friends. Well, that was another bump in the road – However, I decided that after all I have been through this summer, all those who did not care should be of no concern of mine. I made a decision to let go of what was worrying me – There was no longer a point investing my energy in them. Upwards and onward, they say.

In the recent months, it was decided that myself and Daniel should look for a house to make it our own. This means that I will be selling my house. While this is something I want, it also requires myself (and Daniel) to uproot from the places we now call home. I am excited that we get to do this, but again it will not be an easy task – rewarding none the less.

In conclusion, change should be embraced with an open heart. While it might not feel positive in the beginning, things will get better – but only if you let them.

We’ve all gone through tough times and it’s impossible to predict the next time you’re going through financial hardship. While your finances may be in perfect order now, you could find yourself on holiday and spend all your money at once – or you may have to pay up for something sudden and unexpected.

No matter what happens, though, the best solution is to come prepared. It’s going to save you from that dreaded feeling of panic as you realise that you won’t be able to make it to the end of the month, and you’ll feel way more comfortable in general.

Here is a handful of tried-and-tested tips to help you out when you’re in a pinch. That way, you’ll be able to take care of yourself no matter what.

#1 Find a few side-hustles

The great thing about technology these days is that you can actually make money whenever you feel like it. You just need to know where to look – and you have to have a few contacts up your sleeve.

Sure, you still have your actual job and you shouldn’t necessarily quit this to go all out with your side-hustle; this is all about having access to quick money without having to borrow it.

Think about the kind of skills you have that may be useful online, and hit the search engine to check out one of the trillion sites that offer a platform for freelancers and companies. Web design, programming, copywriting, SEO, and social media marketing – all of these are in high demand online.

The good news with these kinds of online jobs is, of course, that you can do them anywhere. Complete a few projects on your commute back home and boost your income significantly – it’s definitely going to come in handy when you really need it.

#2 Get a payday loan

If you’re not able to wait for that paycheck from your full-time job or your side-hustles, it’s time to dive a bit deeper into your options. A payday loan is a great idea when you really need it as you’re able to borrow a small amount on a very short notice.

It will come at a significant interest rate, though, so keep in mind that this option is suitable for desperate times. Read more about it and go to this page if you’re interested; it’s a great option to have handy in case you don’t have access to your credit card at the moment.

Before you apply for a short-term loan, remember that you have to pay it on time. If you should happen to be late, you’re going to have to pay way more than you originally thought – and your credit score is certainly going to suffer. Borrow money responsibly and use it as a lifeguard in case you have no other option.

#3 Sell some of your stuff

You don’t have to be into the minimalist lifestyle just to sell a bunch of your stuff. It does feel great to get rid of some things, though, and you can actually enjoy the feeling of decluttering your life while also making money; it’s therapy that you’re being paid for.

If you need money soon but not right now, this option is perfect for you. Simply check out one of the dozen platforms that offer a marketplace for buyers and sellers, check out what other sellers tend to price their items at (or just slice the amount you paid for it in half), take a few pictures, and wait for the emails to roll in.

Keep in mind that this might take a bit of time, depending on how lucky you are. Sometimes you’ll be approached by potential buyers right away – other times, you’re going to have to wait.

Use this as a way to plan for the month ahead if you see that you might struggle financially. That way, you’re taking care of yourself while also clearing up around the house. Electronics tend to sell a bit quicker, by the way, as well as any nostalgia-items you might have laying around. Check out the attic, in other words, and you should be good to go.

#4 Start a website

This is another tip that requires a certain amount of planning. You’re not going to make money from a website right away, that’s for sure – and you might even have to wait a few months before you start to make an actual income.

Yet, this is a great way to create a passive stream of money for the future, and particularly if you’ve been frustrated about a lack of money in the past. The website can be about anything you think you’ll be able to make money from; make it a DIY blog, a photography website, fill it with your cooking recipes, etc – you have a lot of options.

Have a look at this site if you’re not sure where to begin and keep in mind that this is something that will take a bit of time. The sooner you get started, the sooner you can enjoy the extra income, in other words.

#5 Get a part-time job

Want to significantly boost your income? Get a real part-time job and do something you love. The great thing about this option is that you get to enjoy the feeling of doing something that’s kind of relaxed and you don’t have to worry about working towards that promotion – you’re really just doing this for the money, after all.

If you’ve always loved the idea of working in a coffee shop, for example, get a job where you can work a few hours per week during the evening and maybe a day or two on the weekend.

That way, you have a flexible part-time job where you can smell the coffee and chit chat with others while actually making money. Boosting your income is actually not that hard as long as you’re willing to put in a little bit of work first.

When we lose a loved one, it can be like finding yourself in an emotional maelstrom. At first, shock can keep you from feeling anything besides on edge. We expect to feel the floodgates open and a lot of sadness but there is also anger and frustration. It can feel incredibly unfair, and that feeling can fester inside us, driving us to bad habits and real emotional health problems that can hard to break from. Here are a few ways that we can start to cope with the uglier side of loss.

If you’re not very used to opening yourself up, you might want to not appear so vulnerable before others. What’s more, you might feel like you’re surrounded by people following a loss and you simply have no time to think. If you need a break, ask for one and take time to yourself. However, your friends can be a great source of strength. Find someone you trust and talk out your emotions. Being unable to express them can make you unable to process them too. Even if your friend isn’t sure how they can help, having someone listen can be a great deal of help.

If a loss is left without addressing the cause at all, it can make you feel particularly helpless. This happens, in particular, if it was someone else’s fault. If someone is responsible, then holding them to account with help of services like the Law Office of William W. Hurst, LLC can genuinely help. Money will never make up for a loss so deeply and keenly felt. However, ensuring that the right parties are held responsible can make it feel like they haven’t simply gotten away with it. You can have some closure and know that you got justice for your loved one. Otherwise, that injustice might weigh on your mind for a long time.

Funerals and memorials are important ceremonies for processing the loss of a loved one, as well as celebrating their life. However, for those closest to them, it can feel incomplete. You may not be able to have the emotional closure you need or to feel like you have had a personal goodbye with such a public procedure. In that case, consider having your own memorial for them. You can follow some of the suggestions at Usurns Online, such as planting a tree for them or creating a keepsake pack for them. Others may choose to wear something in remembrance or even get a tattoo. Making your own memorial for them can make it feel like you’ve done a little more to honor them and to keep their memory living in your own mind.

Losing a loved one always feels cruel, unjustified, and unfair. However, it’s important that we take care of ourselves and not lose ourselves in our worst thoughts. Grieving isn’t easy, nor does it feel particularly good even when you’re on the other side. But we can do real harm to ourselves if we dwell.

Far too many people stay in bad relationships that end up affecting their mental health and ruining their chances in life. If you’re in one of those relationships at the moment; it is essential that you do something about it as soon as possible. Lots of women feel like they’re stuck, and so the information on this page should come in handy. The article explains why you need to get out of the relationship, and it also offers some advice on the methods and strategies you might like to consider. With that in mind, let’s get started!

Why you need to get out of your bad relationship

Confidence

People in adverse or negative relationships will always suffer a lack of confidence that can affect their lives in many different ways. You might never apply for that dream job, and you might never fulfill your ambitions of launching a company or volunteering and traveling the world.

Happiness

As mentioned a moment ago, bad relationships can affect your mental health and leave you feeling depressed or anxious. Unless you want to visit a therapist every week and take medication for the rest of your life; it is imperative that you remove yourself from the situation as soon as possible.

Opportunities

Being in a bad relationship can mean you never take up the opportunities available because you worry about their effect on your partner. That can mean you miss out on a lot of things that could change your life for the better.

How you should get out of your bad relationship

Stay with friends

You might feel like there is no hope and nowhere to go. However, most of us have understanding friends who will help out when we need them most. So, maybe you could go and stay with someone you know for a few weeks to get your head straight?

Accept a new job

Getting yourself out of your routine and putting yourself in a position to meet lots of new people is always a sensible move. Maybe you could accept a new job in a different city or something similar? Use that as an excuse to end the relationship and start over.

Get a divorce

If you made the mistake of marrying the wrong person; things could become a little more complicated. However, you just need to speak to a divorce lawyer and ask for their assistance. With a bit of luck, you can start the ball rolling in a matter of days, and you are sure to feel better straight away.

Now you know how and why you need to get out of your bad relationship; you should feel a little more confident in creating your plan of action. It could be good if you could sit down with the person, explain your problems, and iron them out. However, that isn’t always possible, and so sometimes you have to put yourself first. Whatever happens, ensure you make improvements in your life and avoid getting into relationships with the wrong people in the future.

There’s nothing wrong with solo-traveling, some people argue it’s better than traveling in a group as you only have to depend on yourself and there’s no risk of anyone stopping you from doing what you want to do. The only real issue is that it’s not as safe to go traveling all by yourself. Does this mean you shouldn’t go? Absolutely not! If you are planning a solo-travel adventure, then read these safety tips before you go:

Invest In Extra Safety

When traveling alone, you have a tendency to try and find the cheapest accommodation or the cheapest ways of traveling. It’s natural; the more money you save, the more traveling you can do. However, if you want to stay safe, then I suggest you invest some extra money to guarantee your safety. Yes, hostels may be cheap, but it’s just safer to spend more for a hotel with actual security. Again, accommodation in bad locations is very cheap, but they’re bad locations for a reason. Pay extra to stay somewhere that’s in a safer area, and it gives you peace of mind. The same goes for transport; taxis may be cheap, but are they that safe? I’d avoid getting into a taxi on my own in a foreign country, so spend extra on safer transport options like the train, or even hiring your own car.

Take Self-Defense Classes

Look, it won’t hurt to get a bit of self-defense training before you travel alone. Hopefully, you’ll never need to use it, but it’s better to have the skills than to not have them. It’s sad to say this, but a lot of people will directly target people traveling on their own. So, it pays to know what to do if someone does try and attack you or mug you. Remember, you’re acting in self-defense, and every criminal lawyer in the country will tell you that you’re not in the wrong for defending yourself when someone comes at you. Again, I hope it never has to come to this, but you will feel more confident and less on edge if you’ve been to a few classes before you go.

Don’t Accept Anything Free From Anyone

If you’re traveling on your own, then there’s a fair chance the locals will deduce that you’re not from around here. As such, they will try and take advantage of you in any way possible. One common thing is to offer you free drinks or any other type of freebies. Never accept anything free from anyone when you’re traveling. There’s no knowing what’s really in that free drink, and the chances are any other freebies aren’t actually ‘free’. They’ll probably end up demanding you pay for it somehow, which is how things turn ugly. So, to remain safe, just say no!

There are loads of people that go traveling on their own and remain perfectly safe for months on end. You shouldn’t be worried about doing this, just make sure you’re prepared! These three tips will help you stay safe and feel more in control when you’re flying solo.

Online shopping has been a game changer for the fashion industry. While many of us started skeptical, sizing charts and easy returns have converted even the doubters. And, there’s no denying it; getting clothes right to your door is bloody marvelous. As if that weren’t enough, we’re also now able to find any outfit our heart desires. Forget limited stock and terrible style; buying online means we can wear what we want when we want. Despite these benefits, though, there are items many won’t make allowances for. Shoes are a big one. Many a customer wouldn’t dream of buying these without trying. Rings are also a point of contention. So much so that the idea of buying something as important as an engagement ring online could make you weak at the knees. Sorry to say, that’s precisely what we’re be looking at here.

Of course, we don’t all get to choose our engagement rings. Sometimes, our partners buy them as a surprise. But, more couples are now going down the practical route of acquiring a ring after the event. All the better for things like sizing and personal taste. And, you guessed it; it’s now possible to do even this online. But, we know what you’re thinking. Surely this is a terrible idea? Not necessarily. There is undeniable room for error here. But, this could be the way to the right ring for you. And, all you need to do to avoid disaster is follow these three-pointers.Know your ring sizeAs mentioned above, ring size is the reason many couples hold fire on buying. And, when you’re buying online, the risks only increase because you can’t try things on. You’ll also have to deal with longer readjustment wait times thanks to all that posting. In truth, though, this isn’t difficult to get right. All you need to do is head to sites like www.realsimple.com and size your ring before clicking buy. Take time here, and you’re in for better success rates than you may have in a physical store.

Choose the right retailer

The online retailer you choose also determines success. A site with few guidelines or customization options is sure to spell trouble. As can be seen from reviews like this one at https://diamondexpert.com/james-allen-review/, companies like James Allen are your best option thanks to their flexible selections. For the most part, you want to take time finding a company which takes your needs into account. That way, there’s little chance of the ring not being the way you want it.Order in plenty of time

Even with the right retailer and sizing, there’s a slim chance you’ll need to send your ring back. And, by the time you’ve received, resent, and then received it again, time could be getting on. If you have an engagement party or some other deadline, then make sure to order well in advance. This ensures that any returns don’t spell trouble. It’ll also save you freaking out when the post-person arrives empty-handed again!

My Articles by Date

Trying to define yourself is like trying to bite your own teeth. Not possible, as life changes a person, and we all grow... hopefully for the better. This is an online journal of my thoughts, my findings, and my lessons learned.