Women And Men

10 Tips for Approaching Single Women
Most guys get caught up in guessing what to say; here's what they really should do
By dating coach David Wygant Special to Yahoo! Personals Updated: Dec 23, 2009
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What do you do when you see a woman you are attracted to? Do you run and hide? Do you use
some canned line that you read on the Internet? Do you stand there in fear trying to think of the
right thing to say? What is the right thing to do?
When approaching a woman, most guys make the mistake of thinking too much about what to
say. They believe there's one magic line that will work in all situations. They rehearse this magic
line, and when they deliver it, they hope the woman will become instantly attracted to them.
Unfortunately, rarely does this approach work -- because most of what you say is irrelevant. To
catch a woman's attention, it is all about the confidence you display when approaching her.
Here are 10 surefire ways to intrigue her every time:
1. Observe something. Make a comment about something you observe in the environment. This
is especially effective at the grocery store. For example, if she is ordering a turkey sandwich, ask
her if the turkey is good here.
Make your comment immediate to the situation
Make your comment immediate to the situation and it will seem perfectly natural. No matter
where you are, there is always something interesting to comment on.
2. Smile. This shows her that you are friendly and confident. A genuine smile not only feels good
to you, but will put her at ease while creating openness in the interaction -- a requirement for
building rapport.
3. Do not hesitate. If you hesitate in your approach, this tells her that you are not feeling
confident -- an immediate turn-off. When you see her, walk over to her within a short period of
time (the three-second rule). Show her you are a man who knows what he wants and goes after it.
4. Positive body language. If you approach hunched over with your head down, you are sending
negative information about yourself, which makes you dead in the water before you begin. Stand
up straight, with shoulders back and chest out, and use a firm yet relaxed walk.
5. Not too fast. If you walk over too fast, you could likely trigger her internal alarm. A calm,
casual approach is usually the best way to make her feel at ease with you.
6. Keep eye contact. Never be the first to break eye contact when you approach. If you do, this
sends the message that you are not feeling good about approaching. When you use strong eye
contact, she will feel more drawn to you. With practice, you can master this.
7. Listen up. Make sure you pay careful attention to what she says. Do not have your response
pre-thought out. Women love a man who pays attention to the details of what she says. If you
start throwing out random words, she will lose interest fast.
8. Do not fidget. Fidgeting after you approach is distracting and shows you are uncomfortable. If
you communicate that you are uncomfortable, she will feel uncomfortable, too, and will close up.
Practice being aware of your movements. Pay attention to those movements, or lack of
movements, that communicate comfort and confidence.
9. Lighten your tone of voice. The tone of your voice is a very powerful tool. Approaching her in
a light and playful tone is one of the best ways to start. You could also begin in a serious tone,
accusing her of something like "
I hope you saved some turkey for me
I hope you saved some turkey for me," followed by a quick smile to let her know you are joking.
Practice playing with your vocal tone with your friends -- notice the different reactions you get
when you say the exact same thing using varied tones and fluctuations.
10. Lean away from her. A man who leans in too far when he talks often makes a woman feel
crowded. A better approach is to lean away from her slightly. This lets her know that you respect
her space, boundaries, and are comfortable with yourself.
The key to making these tips work for you is putting them into practice! Practice these tips and
see the reaction you get. When you put them all together, you will be surprised at their power.
Dating coach, blogger and author David Wygant has been featured on more than 2,000 radio and
television shows including Dateline, CBS Good Morning, and MTV. Get more sex and dating
tips on David's interactive blog at davidwygant.com.
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