The Pat and Barb Verly family and their 5 children, in laws and grandkids along with many prayer warriors have been drawn together by John's cancer... sharing daily for 8 months started this blog- Family Soul Story - Our faith, family, farm and now our cancer journey called HEALING have colored and deepened our world. WE continue to share and depend on the support of our prayer warrior community, that has lowered us into the Lord's presence for His healing!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

I pray for the warmth of hugs from those that we love... just knowing that they love us and are praying for us even when an ocean seperates us... I know of their love, and am so confident that they are lifting me up in prayer daily, as they are in my prayers for them!

The spiritual connection of LOVE and PRAYER is what keeps us going down the narrow path carrying our Most Cherished Cross, and following after our loving and forgiving Savior... we are surrounded by the army of the amazing Saints, that add so much to our family and our life on earth... pointing the way to Christ! Jesus, we trust in you. Bless-bless

The highlight of Christmas and of my year happened two weeks ago as my family gathered for CCC - Cross Christmas Camp. It was so amazing for us to commemorate our becoming Catholic 40 years ago on Christmas Eve! Christmas eve was nice going to mass with my husband and son, and mother-in-law, after a day of work at the nursing home. Back to work on Christmas day, and then I allowed myself to be down about not seeing any of my girls or really having any kind of a celebration... it was a down day all due to myself! When I think of Christmas... I am so touched and moved by our gathering 2 weeks ago, and knowing that all of my girls are with those that they love, and are attending mass with the True meaning of Christmas being their foremost concern and heart's desire... embracing Christ, come into the world to show us God's loving and forgiving face! This morning sharing the wonderful gift of Truth in morning prayer - see http://www.magnificat.com/ - with husband and son! "Christmas is a season for song, for God's love reaches from heaven to earth and earth to heaven in the incarnation. Let us spend this last day of the year in profound thanksgiving and praise for the extraordinary gift of our salvation in Jesus Christ."

We remembered Hallel today as the psalm - 108 - used in morning prayer is a "grand Hallel Psalm"... John had not heard that there were places in the psalms with different Hallel psalms of pure praise to HIM! The ones around Psalm 100 are called "Grand Hallel" and it is kind of a joke in the Community as the word for Grand in French means tall in English also, and Susan/Hallel is towering over the small French sisters with her 5'10" height! Allowing her to laugh with them at this "joke."

"My heart is ready, O God;

I will sing, sing your praise.

Awake, my soul;

awake, lyre and harp.

I will awake the dawn.

I will thank you, Lord, among the peoples,

among the nations I will praise you,

for your love reaches to the heavens

and your truth to the skies.

O God, arise above the heavens;

may your glory shine on earth!"

Psalm 108

The Gospel for today is amazing John 1! So powerful and I just groan at the beauty of his words of Truth, Life, Light and Love! ..."through him was life, and this life was the light of the human race; the light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it." So amazing to be reassured that darkness will not win, has not won, and will be defeated! There is so much that is disheartening when you get close to people! There is so much hard stuff that people deal with in their families to start with. When I pray the litany for Pat's family and mine... there is a lot to pray for - that the Light and the Life may dwell within!

So many marriages and families are under attack... the darkness creeps in from the computer, TV, busyness, lies from Satan about the value of life and the marriage of one man to one woman, the lies of Satan about how we should be limiting our families... so that we can indulge our children and ourselves with material things and not siblings, which any person will tell you later in life that they regret not having had more children! "... but the world did not know him... And the Word became flesh, and made his dwelling among us, and we saw his glory, the glory as of the Father's only-begotten Son, full of grace and truth.... No one has ever seen God. The only begotten Son, God, who is at the Father's right side, has revealed him." John 1:1-18

Mary had to show me this beautiful banner in the sun - the Holy Spirit Dove- we have plans to make a watercolor of it soon. It is such a blessing to have some special teachable times with my kids and grandkids - ways that I can share the deep joy I have within at the blessings and graces I have received and continue to receive on my daily journey of faith/Catholic! "Grace and Truth came through Jesus Christ!"

Jesus, I am so overwhelmed by this past year as we stand on the last day, and look back! To think of the 40 years that started with my dad's listening to your call through His Word, and his resounding and unconditional "Yes!" I can honestly and without hesitation say that every day since has been filled with YOU! Yes, there are high points in the journey - my month of daily mass in the convent as I lived with them considering your call to me as a new Catholic, my growing at "the farm" reading Merton and A'Kempis, my meeting my Catholic farmer, who said that he would only marry a Catholic and his prayers for me, my children - all 11 - 5 here and 6 in heaven praying for me, my TEC retreat after 3 of my girls invited me to take this deeper walk, the Rosary each day and how I have Our Lady showing me the beauty of Motherhood and being a woman of God! I could go on and on filled am I with all the Truth and Grace from Christ and His Bride the Church! I lift up all those families that need to know you, and that the Light can continue to overcome the darkness. Jesus, we trust in you! Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb

"Willed by God in the very act of creation, marriage and the family are interiorly ordained to fullfillment in Christ and have need of his graces in order to be healed from the wounds of sin and restored to their 'beginning,' that is, to full understanding and the full realization of God's plan...

The family finds in the plan of God the creator and redeemer not only its indentity,what it is, but also its mission, what it can and should do... And since in God's plan it has been established as an 'intimate community of life and love,' the family has the mission to become more and more a community of life and love... Hence the family has the mission to guard, reveal, and communicate love, and that is a living reflection of and a real sharing in God's love for humanity and the love of Christ the Lord for the Church, his bride."

Friday, December 30, 2011

It is the most wonderful hour of my week... sitting at His feet in Adoration. With the Church adorned so beautifully for Christmas, it was a very special time finding HIS LOVE! There is so much peace and calm as I just sit in His presence and dwell in the knowledge and LOVE of Him! Jesus, we trust in you! Bless-bless, Barb

Dearest Holy Family... we need so badly to have you in the heart of every family. The family is under attack and has lost sight of the values of LIFE and LOVE. The sacrament of marriage between a man and a woman has been minimalized and given little value. Marriages are cast aside too easily, and not embraced as the "Most Cherished Cross." That Cross that brings us to eternal LIFE, if we would only see that it is helping us to sainthood. Our children are not learning the morals and values and Truths... as they have become shades of gray and not black and white and clear for all to see! Show us how to love without counting the cost, and to put others needs ahead of our own. May we find a little slice of heaven in our domestic Church - our homes! May we gather for prayer together and look to YOU - our loving and forgiving, Lord and Savior Jesus Christ! May Mothers and Fathers look to you for guidance and an example of being the parents to raise LIGHTS for the world! Protect the unborn from Satan's lies... may the parents see them to be the LIFE and LOVE that they truly are, and give them LIFE. We need you, Holy Family, on this your feastday to save the family from all that is trying to destroy it. Jesus, Mary and Joseph we trust in you. Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb

"The family is the privileged setting where every person learns to give and receive love... the family is an intermediated institution between individuals and society, and nothing can completely take its place... The family is a necessary good for peoples, an indispensable foundation for society and a great lifelong treasure for couples. It is a unique good for children, who are meant to be the first fruit of the love, of the total and generous self-giving of their parents... The family is also a school which enables men and women to grow to the full measure of their humanity...'O God, who by the Holy Family left us a perfect model fo family life lived in faith and obedience to your will, help us to be examples of faith and love for your commandments.' "

Pope Benedict XVI

"For all of you are children of the light and children of the day." I Thes 5:5

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Today I had to look for blue socks to send to France... I think that is carrying it a bit far, but that is what she needs to go with her blue habit, so... I did surprise myself and found some, so I stocked up on them and will mail more than Hallel needs thinking that she can share them. I had the option of making my black and white picture taken of myself at adoration this morning any color, but blue just suited... Thinking of you, my sweet Little Sister Hallel! Bless-bless

We are gifted at least once a year with a book to allow us to read and grow at Church. The one that was set out on tables for us to have is now....My Life with the Saints by Fr James Martin, SJ

Pat started reading it ahead of me, over Christmas weekend, and the things he told me about it intrigued me! He spoke quite a bit about Thomas Merton, who I know has not been officially sainted by The Church, but was huge in my early Catholic days, and in the days that I considered "a call" to religious life... as I have shared... when my dad told me that he was becoming Catholic along with my mom and the younger 8 kids... he allowed the 3 oldest to make this lifelong and life-changing decision on their own. I had been led to consider becoming a nun... after living a similar life of prayer-chores-and sharing scripture in a Christian commune in Colorado. My "famous" immediate answer to my dad..."I want to be a nun, so yes I want to become Catholic!"

In those early years of discovery... that have now turned into 40 years of daily being fed and growing, including now the journey of shared faith that this memoir is blessing me with, I am ooooohhhing and aaaaahhhhing over Fr James putting into words the deep feelings I have for the saints and how they have changed and colored my world like the most glorious stainglass window or the most glorious masterpiece of art!

Today's Gospel is the Presentation of Jesus in the Temple where he meets Simeon, "this man was righteous and devout, awaiting the consolation of Isreal, and the Holy Spirit was upon him." This is the decade that I pray for Hallel on the days of the Joyful mysteries, and I always feel that we did give her to her spouse, Jesus Christ. We got a call from her yesterday, and her dad always has to ask her if she is happy and where she belongs..."Yes, dad." She told us of the almost continous prayer and masses that were said for Christmas vigil and beyond. John told her that she probably laid down in her cell for a short rest in between each. She is now somewhat caught up on her rest after celebrating HIS birth in every way that they possibly could! ONe thing about being part of the Community... you are always deeply a part of what is going on in the Church, along with many saints, the Church Fathers, the Pope, and all that makes The True Church the Truth and the Light!

My sweet grandchildren by the light of the advent wreath last night... Fr James in his book wrote a chapter about Thomas Merton, and how reading his book - Seven Story Mountain - was instumental in his leaving a life of big business, and eventually becoming a Jesuit priest! I just read another biography about Merton, and to know of this man, who went to Gethsemani in Kentucky, and revently visited his grave and sat in the chapel where he was ordained a priest and said prayers throughout his cloistered life. It felt like I was there with him and was a very wonderful and deeply touching to me... sharing the way that Merton awakened us to our Catholic faith and journey that never ends! So amazing to find a comrade on the JOURNEY! Now he has gone to St Ignatius of Loyola, and he was so instrumental in our listening to His Word, and hearing His Call to come into The Church! I am groaning with deep thankfulness to this certain saint that spent years formulating the Ignation Exercises... The retreat is explained this way... "During the time retreatants ponder the love of God, pray over the decision to follow Christ, contemplate events from the life of Jesus, and experience God's creative activity in all things." I can so see how the Exercises enabled my father to hear Christ call to him - "Come and embrace my Bride, The Church!" My dad said, without looking back at his Protestant ministry, "Yes!"

Jesus, another day has arisen in which I am filled with such wonder at all you have given me and blessed me with every day of my jouney with you in your True Church! How I love your Saints and all that they show me! I am overjoyed to reconnect with some old friends that were instrumental in our journey and shed light on the many possibilities for each of us to consider. As Maria and Jospeh said in their Christmas letter: "Well, we just wanted to let you know, that we still are in the fight. We want to be saints. We love Jesus, and we want Jesus Christ to be in everything we do. We're not here to quit. We are disciples of Christ. So, as your Christmas Season goes by, pray for us... Let us be saints together - to be anything else is not to have lived." With words like that as the wind beneath my wings, and all of the amazing "Saints" in my life past, present and future... I am filled with such wonder and AWE! Jesus, I trust in you! Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb

"I thought of everything I would like to say to Thomas Merton: That there was probably no other person other than Jesus so responsible for my vocation. That, thanks to his writings, I still carried within myself the pull toward the monastic life in the midst of an active world. That his life of contradictions and complexities helped me see that all of us, no matter how crazy our lives seem, can be holy. That he helped me understand what he called my 'true self,' the person I am before God, and the person I am meant to be. And that, though obviously flawed, he remained one of my great heroes.

But nothing seemed right. So I said simply, 'Thanks,' trusting that he knew all I meant..."

Fr James Martin SJ as he stood at the graveside of Thomas Merton in Gethsemani Kentucky... I join you with so many, "Thanks, Thomas Merton! I am forever changed by your sharing your journey!"Bless-bless, Barb Verly, the grateful

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

After sharing a nice meal with Ruth's family and Pat's mom... the table was cleared and the advent wreath was put in the middle and Ruth lit the candles. It was fun to have the kids gather around it for one last time after they had put on their jammies for bed. It has been a good Advent and a Christmas like no other... kind of lonesome with the girls spread far and wide. We got a call from Hallel in France today, and it was just nice to hear her voice, and to know that she received her package in time for Christmas. "You did it right mom... get me the same gift that you get dad every year... underwear. But you can send socks the next time... Yes, they need to be blue." I think I will invest in some blue dye. Those nice athletic socks that come in package of 6... would be just right if I could figure out the right color of blue! Some of the Belgain cookies got there in some pretty big pieces too! We love to gather together in any way that we can. The Advent wreath will soon be put away, but it has been a good thing for us to share prayers and prepare for HIM! Jesus, we trust in you. Bless-bless

We are getting updates from Pennsylvania about little Gus... he has been sick with a bad cold and ear infections, and now he has a new 1st tooth in the front on the bottom! I am thinking that he is experiencing a lot of pain in his head, ears, mouth and who knows where... Nancy says that he is sleeping or fussing, and that is understandable considering all that he is going through. Too bad that it has to be over Christmas, and probably good that he wasn't here to expose two sets of twins with his cold at Verly Christmas. Today we are thinking about the little ones... it is the feastday of the Holy Innocents - the Flight to Egypt!

This was my gift from Nancy this Christmas... it is on the table with a candle lit by it..."When the Magi had departed, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, "Rise, take the child and his mother, flee to Egypt, and stay there until I tell you. Herod is going to search for the child and try to destroy him." Joseph took the child and his mother by night and departed for Egypt..."Out of Egypt I called my son." Mt 2: 13-18 The Gospel for today! It is striking me today that my youngest grandsons - David and Augustine would have both been the age of those boys that were killed "2 years old and under"... Too hard to think of them being massacred to try to rid the world of Christ! They are called the tiny martyrs..."Herod orders the massacre of all who resemble Jesus in gender and approximate age. This barbaric case of 'mistaken identity' becomes the source of incomparable exaltation for the Holy Innocents. For there is no greater glory than for a person to be mistaken for Christ himself... The blood of the Son Jesus that cleanses us from all sin begins to reach us and transform us today in a powerful way through the blood of the maytryed Holy Innocents." see http://www.magnificat.com/

Jesus, how hard it is to think that anyone would want to take the life of the tiny innocent children! The only way that we can see any kind of good in it is to know that they are with you in heaven and through their blood we are brought closer to you. How the parents of all these little boys had to look to their faith to make it through! There is no other way to find the strength to go forward with empty arms and the knowledge of the horrible end for their precious child! You have to realize that being martyred brings you to the place of eternal life and peace. Jesus, we trust in you! Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb

"... Joseph's example teaches us an earnest perseverance in a godly and blessed way of living , together with an ever growing love of God's will. By such virtues did he most faithfully guard the little Child and his Mother from those who would have killed him.... Herod, who had hunted the Child and would have killed him, may be compared to the world, which would kill the divine infant in our souls. From the world we must flee if we would preserve the Child alive within us. Indeed, our own soul is the Child."

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

So fun to compare the two watercolor pictures... this one the day after Christmas with Mary dressed for the Verly Christmas party and a Christmas apron over the top of her dress to protect it, and a cute snowman looking on...

Then this one of the two girls on the shore of Lake Michigan painting on the sugar sand using lake Michigan water to paint with. The watercolors are always a bright beautiful rainbow of color that add such wonder to the picture. Dip the brush in the water and then rub it on the color of choice and paint using your imagination... I have gotten both of my granddaughters hooked on painting and time to time the grandsons will jump in... Right now little Dave is into YELLOW!

Only YELLOW! At least it isn't black - for a while Mary would paint and beautiful picture and then cover everything with black = a thing of beauty that turned black. From then on there was a new rule that black could only be used sparingly. Jesus, we trust in you. Bless-bless

The Church was so beautiful on Christmas Eve - John exclaimed that it is more beautiful at night, and all the beautiful poinsettias and lit trees made it a glorious sight to behold as we celebrated the birth of our Savior! Today is a most special day as it is the feastday of the main John in our lives, and probably the biggest namesake for our son, John. Our only son after having our 4 wonderful daughters and 3 losses. I had always thought that for some unknown reason that I could not carry boys, so his lost brothers were named... Christopher, Thomas ( who I lost at the same time that my sister, Mary, died of cancer at 28), and Joseph. For all of those pregnancies I had the name, Luke, my patron saint, for my boy's name. But when my 8th pregnancy looked to be girl #6... Luke had lost a lot of it's luster due to it being overused in movies and TV with Luke Duke, and Luke Skywalker... and now looking back and how huge Blessed John Paul II was in our marriage from the beginning... John was the name, and when we were overjoyed by the arrival of our first boy..."His name is John!" It has been good and right for him, and there are many saint John feastdays which we call his... Why not? They are all great and wonderful examples for him, and celebrate in the length, width, and depth of his wonderful namesakes... today being St John the Evangelist and his glorious and amazing Gospel that..."Being Christian is not the result of an ethical choice or a lofty idea, but the encounter with an event, a person." Pope Benedict XVI That is why the Evangelist John coveys not an idea but an event: "what he looked upon and touched." John's personal encounter with Christ blessed him with the ability to read the sublest of signs: "he saw and believed." "Through John we know how we are to participate as our destiny in the life of Christ." St Edith Stein

Mary reminded me that an upside down candycane was a "J" for Jesus and also for John today on his feastday! In the Magnificat this morning we learn this about ST John..."St John is the evangelist of the incarnation. He proclaims the glory of the Word coming forth from God to take on human flesh and dwell in our midst." "He saw his glory, the glory of the Father's only Son, full of grace and truth." John 1:14 Reading the first chapter of John is so amazing! You feel so uplifted, and the JOY of the LIGTH settles deep within us!

1" In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was with God in the beginning. 3 Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. 4 In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome[a] it. "

Jesus, we are forever grateful and thankful for your coming to us through the Word of God... the amazing evangelists give us the Words of Your Holy Spirit, to give us all that we need each day to know and to follow after YOU, carrying our cross! We are rejoicing today as we embrace the Truth that St John shared with us... his openess to your Spirit of LIFE and LOVE comes through to us in the Gospel of St John! Jesus, we trust in you. Amen and Halleluia!

Bless-bless, Barb

1 John 1: 1-4

The Incarnation of the Word of Life

1 "Beloved: That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim concerning the Word of life. 2 The life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us. 3 We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ. 4 We write this to make our[a] joy complete. "
The first reading in mass today... Wow! We are so changed by the way that we "see" you, "touch" you, and how we "hear" you, dear Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ!

Monday, December 26, 2011

Baby Jesus, I was reminded on my birthday that I was called to a year of praising you in all things... Well, I majorly failed yesterday, and it was the one day that I had every reason to praise you as I knelt before your humble manger and gazed upon the miracle of your tiny perfect form of new life! I grumbled and complained at work about the hard things that I had to deal with. I came home and cried for my girls and not being able to see them.... making the two people that I was with miserable too! It was a hard Christmas because I was selfish and would not praise you in all! I ask your forgiveness and help to turn things around this first day of Christmas, and to put a smile on my face, and find the JOY in my heart. I am nothing wtihout you, and you are in control of my life - I give it to you and praise you for all! Jesus, I trust in you! Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb
"The grace of God has appeared, saving ALL!" Titus 2: 11
"Lord Jesus, as I kneel before your manger in adoration, let my first Christmas word be :thank you. Thank you, Gift of the Father, for coming to save me from my sins.
Without you I do not even know how to be human. The characteristics of my human body express the divine person of God's Son. And in that wondrous expression, Lord, you reveal me to myself. Thank you for that saving revelation in your sacred humanity. As the Christmas liturgy proclaims, 'in Christ man restores to man the gift of everlasting life.' Thank you for coming as one like myself to save me from myself.... You come as a baby as babies are irresistable and adorable. You come as a baby because you want our first impression of God incarnate to be that of one who does not judge... May I love you always, at every moment, with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. May the tenderness, the dependency, and the mercy that you reveal in your infancy become the hallmarks of my life... AS I kneel before you, Newborn King, I surrender to you all my selfishness, self-asorption, self-indulgence, sef-righteousness, self-assertion, and self-exultation." Fr Peter Cameron... see http://www.magnificat.com/

The day would have been totally different yesterday... if I could only have gotten past feeling sorry for myself and remembered the beauty of YOU, and given you the praise on humble knees that you command from me! Command as a precious infant can receive nothing else from us! I praise you, and go forth today changed in heart and mind! Jesus, thank YOU!

Sunday, December 25, 2011

My gift from John... Our life is altered by John's cancer journey - cancer/healing. All fears and concerns are as nothing now that he has conquered, what appeared to be certain death at 20 years of age, and thousands of prayers! He is the only child that comes home from college at his breaks to live with us for a week here and there, and we are filled with delight to have him "living" here at home. It is a very quiet Christmas day here... I am heading off to work in a few minutes at the nursing home, Ruth and Paul will be going to early mass with their family... as Paul is leading singing. Then they will be heading to Siox Falls to see a new baby born yesterday - Abigail arrived to Paul's brother and his wife... congratulations Tony and Julie with your wonderful gift from God Christmas gift of LIFE and LOVE- little Abigail!

Nancy, Bill and Augustine are in Pennsylvania with his family... here's a funny picture from Nancy of Gus covered with frosting after "decorating" his first cookies - I think he is the decorated one.

Frosted the Baby...it looks like Gus is having a wonderful time! Maria, Joseph, Therese and David are in Texas with snow - due to Joe's being a new Leutenant leave is not possible. Hallel is in France, and sitting by two of her classmates last night at mass - made me think about her and yes miss her. But someone reminded me to enjoy those that you are with, so... I did! I am forever grateful for all the family and the wondeful times both big and small that we are blessed with. As the person next to me at mass last night shared that all she really wanted for Christmas was for her family to get along, and that she didn't think that I had to hope for that! She's so right... our family loves and cares for each other and there is no division! That is all that truly matters!

Jesus, thank you for this opportunity to love and to serve following your example of coming in all humility as a newborn infant... Use me to your honor and glory today, and be with all of our family as we cannot be together today. May we count the blessings we have been given in our love one for the other and the faith that we share without reservations. Jesus, we trust in you! Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb

"No one, whether shepherd or wise man, can approach God here below except by kneeling before the manger at Bethlehem and adoring him hidden in the weakness of a new-born child." CCC 563

Saturday, December 24, 2011

The final hymn at mass tonight with John, Pat and his mother was Joy to the World... I was struck at the beauty of the words. We had a wonderful time at mass and later we enjoyed supper out together... I told John that all I want for Christmas from him is a special picture, and he gifted me with that!

He gave me the most wonderful gift ever... my son, healthy and cancer free! A wonderful time together celebrating Christmas Eve - forever grateful for tis huge blessing and answer to so many prayers! Jesus, we trust in you! We are filled with wonder of his LOVE!

I am so into thinking about the birth of our Lord this year... wanting to remember the "face" of a newborn babe... I am going back to the end of May when baby Augustine, our youngest grandchild surprised us a few weeks early and very small... under 6 pounds! Here he is just days old at his first mass with mom and dad, and wonderful St Therese of the Holy Face of Jesus! There is no doubt that his Catholic faith will be always foremost in his life, with all the prayers and lessons from his parents, and most of all the mass every week and even daily.

The priest that married them just 9 months before was thrilled to see their little Augustine! Being open to LIFE is a blessing that Nancy and Bill are experiencing every day... They are so blessed to have him enriching their lives! Thinking once again of Mary and Joseph and their knowledge of Jesus being God come to earth in the form of a tiny helpless infant... totally depending on them to care for him and bring him into the stages of growth and developement. So much harder back them to find the necessities and the ways to do them were much more difficult. Giving the baby a bath involved getting the water, heating the water, and then drying the baby and keeping it warm... much more complicated.

This is the furnace that kept the baby Jesus warm in the stable...the cow and the donkey and the sheep that were probably in the stable... gave off the earthy warmth from their bodies, and their breaths, and their excretions.... earthy! And, of course, humble! We all know that humble is good, and for God to enter the world in a stable as a helpless infant in that time of history without any of the modern conveniences... one thing is for sure... Mary and Joseph were not distracted by TV or the internet. They had to work harder to do the simple things that we take for granted, and that kept them somewhat preoccupied, but it was always with their son in mind! So much giving and caring without thinking of themselves - only HIM! He wasn't bundled in a blanket sleeper, but was wrapped in swadling clothes... or pieces of fabric that we wrapped around him for warmth and to make him feel safe. Mary a young new mother was learning on her new Son of God! He grew and became strong, so she did just fine!

Jesus, we love you and are filled with wonder at your coming into this world through your mother, Mary most Holy. Walk with us this day and forward... may we look outside of ourselves to "see" your face in all those around us - especially those in our domestic Church - our family. Jesus, we trust in you. Amen and Halleluia

Bless-bless, Barb

May I see Baby Jesus there with the residents of the nursing home this Christmas Eve day...

Friday, December 23, 2011

Johnny is home, and Lilly is so happy to have some attention from the person, who saved her life at the same time John was fighting for his life - beating brain cancer's butt! Lilly had a "mysterious farmdog disease" and was dying before our eyes... on ther farm that is just the way of life and death on the farm. But John's girlfriend at the time, Aileen, made John take her to the local vet and Lilly was put on a cocktail of many pills, which we fed to her morning and night in a chunk of velveeta cheese... She recovered, along with John under the careful medical watch of doctors in Mayo, and hundreds of thousands of prayers! I know that John's thoughts go back to those times, where Lilly helped him look outside of himself and care for another creature of God. It was good therapy and lifechanging for him... he has become a much more compassionate and caring person after the humbling called cancer/healing.

Splitting wood with his dad... the fire is warming the house and our hearts as we share some family time together. How we love to have our wonderful son healthy and back home with his parents... home on break from his college for a couple weeks! It will be interesting to see if we get tired of each other... I doubt it! We so enjoy being together! Thank you, Lord for the way that our sharing this healing has made us so close. Jesus, we thank you and trust in you.

Bless-bless, Barb

All the animals in the stable soon will be the witnesses to the birth of the Light and Life and Love of the world...I bet there was a dog there keeping warm in the stable by the heat given off by the cows and the sheep... just as they warmed the air for the tiny baby Jesus... I am so enjoying putting myself in the story of our salvation and the wonderful saving grace of Family - the Holy Family... Jesus, Mary and Joseph, pray for all families now and always! Amen and Halleluia!

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This was taken on Easter Sunday in Colman, South Dakota about 12 years ago!

My dad had done the unthinkable - said yes to being a Deacon in Colman, South Dakota just 60 minutes from our door to their door of the rectory... they had promised to help out as parish administrator of a small town chuch and to help out in the other cluster churches. It was my parents first contact with living the farm life other than second hand through a visit here and there to our farm. Now they were immersed in farm life and loved it! I loved the fact that for 3 years I could jump in the car and go and hang out with them for an afternoon here and there! It was amazing! Soon their 3 years were at an end and we all gathered for a huge family celebration of Easter... we filled the social hall with our huge family... I am the oldest of 11 with over 30 grandkids! The wind of the Holy Spirit was howling as our family gathered in front of the church doors for a family photo... it made us smile to have the wind roaring at us with the fury that only the prairie can muster!

How I love the pictures of the kids in Big Shoes! Adorable!

What is it about the kids walking around the house in mom or dad's shoes? I think that it is a form of flattery... they like to see mom of dad in those shoes so it makes them feel like they are looking like their beloved parent of just acting big like them! I remember my 3rd daughter, Maria, was so in love with her daddy... she would crawl around the bedroom and drape his socks around her neck that she had picked up off the floor just as a token of her love for him. I have a group of pictures in the bathroom that are just of that theme... Wearing mom and dad's shoes. I think that it is about as cute as can be... and also a wonderful tribiute to a child's love and appreciation for their parnets. I have now seen my 3 grandchildren that live closeby and spent much time with us also put on mostly grandpa's shoes which are usually over by the door and walk around in them... I think that a lot of that reflects that love and appreciaion that they have for him and his loving sharing ways with them. Now a generation later I have watched now grandpa LOVE each one of those kids so specially by showering them with the time by taking them along outside or allowing them to sit in his lap and share his meal when he comes in late for a meal... The same scene that I saw with our 5 kids and the resulting love and appreciation and respect! Who knew wearing his shoes was a sign of love and devotion?!?

The absolutely amazing letter that Susan/Little Sister Hallel sent to Nancy about marriage...

Nancy was engaged to Bill Bandzuch on April 10, 2010... We are all so happy for her as she has waited long for her Catholic man to come into her life. She had stood by her values and as a result it was especially sweet and special when she joyfully accepted Bill's proposal! We all gathered in Maria and Joe's back yard to help them celebrate that afternoon minus her sister in KC... Little Sister Hallel. We called her and she spoke to each one of us and even her neice and nephews ! A month later Nancy found this letter from her sister in the mailbox. It was mother's day and she called me to read it to me over the phone. I was blown away and at first thought how crazy it was that a young girl,who had answered the call to remain chaste and be a little sister had so much insight into marriage! But when I realized that she is now the "bride of Christ" it now makes all the sense in the world! I would like to once again share this powerful and wise letter here... Nancy, Look I am writing you a letter... aren't you impressed? Well, you better be because both you and I know how often this happens. I am writing to tell you now extremely excited I am about your engagement to Bill. I have to admit, when I got the news I wasn't really shocked but that night as it sunk in during adoration and the next day during mass I was so happy. My heart overflowed with joy for you. How beautiful to know that you have found your... most cherished cross. While I have never had the experience of being married, from what I hear is that he will truly be your cross. But not your cross as human eyes look at it, as a thing to run away from, as a thing of torture but rather as that which is truly the tree of life. It is only when clinging to the cross that one can truly live, it is the source of all life and of all love. Your marriage to Bill will be this, not something to run away from when it gets hard and when it hurts, but something to hold tight to, especially when it hurts because it is in this that you will find life and love. Know that it is through your marriage that Jesus wants to show you his great love for you and also that the best example that you can give to the world of Christ's love is a marriage lived in truth. So, in other words, know that I am so happy for you and that I love you a whole lot. Know that you are in my prayers during this crazy time of wedding planning; that you may not go crazy but rather learn to love each other better and that you may both have great joy and great peace. Remember to pray for me too! God Bless, Your little Sister Hallel

My sister Mary and I in the barn in our barn clothes when she was here to help us... 1982

I was not pregnant in this picture so it must have been after Nancy was born... Mary was soon to leave us sadly... she had fallen in love with the farm and did a few years later meet her dairy farmer - they married and had a daughter before she died of lymphoma at the age of 28... Some things in life are a mystery.. someday we will understand.

Our daughters, Nancy and Little Sister Hallel/Susan, with John in Lourdes, France.

Little Sister Hallel had just taken the habit of the community of the Lamb and changed her name a few days before this taken in August of 2009... John, Nancy and I had gone to help her celebrate this huge step in her life! John had just been diagnosed with brain cancer and had just completed his second chemo and was better, so within 24 hours we decided that we would fly to France! We visited Lourdes and all bathed in the healing waters which miraculously flow from the spring where St Bernedett was told to dig in the mud! John said that the day was "very good" , and for him that is saying a lot! This past winter Pat and I were in a study group of a book written by Matthew Kelly called Rediscovering Catholicism... this paragraph on p48 is amazing and so wonderfully defends the choice of religious life but also the joys and beauty of this life! I quote: "In every age, there is a small number of men and women who are prepared to turn their backs on popular culture and personal gain to embrace heroically the life Jesus outlines in the Gospels. These people fashion Catholicism into a lifestyle, they listen attentively to the voice of God in their lives, and they passionately pursue their personal adventure of salvation. As a result, they capture the attention and fascinate the imaginations of everyone who crosses their path. Paradoxically, the modern world pities these people because it believes they are missing out on something. Never feel sorry for them. These men and women are the happiest people who ever lived. They are the saints. If the Church is to thrive in this modern era, it depends on men and women like these."

Sitting on the front porch of our home in Minneapolis - me and my friend Marge a few years after..

This was taken a few years after we met while attending welcome week at the U of M in 1970! I did not know at the time that Margie would be responsible for the rest of my life - my meeting and a year later marrying her brother, Pat... I have written many cards to her over the years telling her in every way possible that because of her I have my life. We will celebrate our 32 anniversary this summer, so she has been in my life more than not! Thank you Margie Rose/Raterra Rashana for being such a loyal and true friend... there is no doubt that you were put in my life by our loving forgiving Lord ! Your life growing up on the farm in Southwest Mn is now my life and our children's lives are blessed as a result! How I rejoice at the Lord's fingerprint on my life! Jesus I trust in You! Please bless my dear friend now and forever. Amen and Halleluia!

My sister Mary at the baptism of my daughter, Nancy Anna.. She is Godmother and my dad is baptizing

In 1982 my sister, Mary, came to help me while I was on bedrest with my second daughter... I had high blood pressure and was on bedrest, so Mary came to help me around the house with my 2 year old Ruth and help Pat milk the cows. She was a city girl like me, but fell in love with the farm and we loved having her with us! After Nancy was born on April 2 we asked Mary to be her Godmother. We realized after I was on my feet that she needed to move on, so tearfully she went up to live with my folks in TF. She eventually became a doctor's office nurse and on a blind date met her farmer, Gerry.... he was a dairy farmer in Wisconsin. They married and had a daughrer, Audrey.... When Audrey was 20 mo Mary died of Lymphoma... Gerry is now married to Cathy, who had 5 kids and her husband drowned in the river up there...

Snapping beans with the 5 klids as we are in Taylors Falls visiting my parents in the summer of 92

I was in the thick of bean harvest in my garden when I took my kids to spend some days in the summer with my parents... probably late July of 92... WE picked them and brought them along to snap at my parent's house. We have such wonderful memories of our days spent in Taylors Falls at their remodeled cape cod house up on Angel Hill. Now after 14 years of liiving on Lake Michigan in Manistique in the upper penninsula... my parents have bought a home on the St Croix River in St Croix Falls, Wi which is right across the river from Taylors... I am thrilled that now my parents will be close enough for me to go and see them for the day or for a few days much more often! I loved to go to the big lake, but so missed my parents being closer so that I could spend time with them! Thnak you Lord for this move and may they continue to be a wonderful presence in my life for years to come!

The wedding shower that the friends from church and daily mass put on for Pat and I in my mom's

My friend Marilyn just had given Pat and I wonderful rosaries for a gift... we were both very touched and how much better does it get? To have a Catholic Shower! It was wonderful and the rosary has been huge in our marriage too!

Pat's mom took this picture after milking the cows one morning shortly after we were married.

Typical old camera quality - this was after we were done milking the cows with the baby calves... with dairy calves...they are taken off of their mothers at birth so that you and I can drink the milk...they start out on a big bottle and then graduate to pails of milk. That was one of my jobs out there as well as giving each cow some protein to eat while Pat was moving down the line milking them. I also would help undo the headgate when he was done so that they could go out of the barn. Pat of the time I would sit on an upside down pail and watch him milk the cows and sometimes we would visit. I married a farmer and I found these times special to the point that when Ruth was born - I would bring her over and put her strapped in her infant seat close to the heater in the milk house... she was born Jan 4, 1980... Soon my in laws told me to bring her in the house and put her in the bed with them while I helped Pat... Ruthie got to know her grandparents really well and has early memories of waking up and seeing a certain light fixture over their bed and the warm feelings that go with snuggling with her loving grandparents morning after morning! They even took a movie of her first steps dressed in different outfits day after day that we have never seen! Got to do that someday! The early years were special for many!

Pat comes to visit me in the Cities as things slow down a bit on the farm - cross country skiing...

This picture was taken by my younger sister, Mary... she is now gone for 24 years due to cancer at the age of 28! Pat had come to visit me and we decided for him to wear one of my brother's boots and try cross country skiing for the first time! The boots were too small, but when Pat Verly is motivated to do something... nothing will prevent him! Boy, have I learned that to be a huge part of him after almost 32 years of marriage! He also likes to be rough and tumble and caused this fall to get some bodily contact and to tussle with me! Thank goodness for soft snow to fall in! The dating years were long distance and due to the demands of the farm - we dated maybe once every few weeks when he could certainly not every night or even once a week... at the busy times of the year it was even less, but Pat was very good about calling me on the phone and having long conversations about our lives... he gave me many lessons on the farm life in the middle of the nigh... when he would wake me up after he got in from work! I knew that when that phone would ring that it was my farmer! The thing about farming... similar to the Catholic Church... you never learn it all...there is always more to learn and my Patrick is very intelligent and very interested in it all!

I like to call this picture taken at our first Christmas....married 4 months....THE LOOK OF LOVE!

My mother probably took this picture of Pat and I at our first Christmas at their home in Mpls in 1978... I love it! To capture Pat looking at me with so much love and attention gives me warm feelings and delight! I need to remember this sometimes when I am feeling down about myself and if Pat is disappointed in me that hurts about as badly as anything can... Deep down we love each other no matter the obstacles!

Her name Hallel means Joy- Halleluia.... she reflects that inner joy when she is singing...

Little Sister Hallel has shared that when others say her name they are praising God with the highest of praise and Joy! There are many Hallel psalms including the last 5 psalms - 145 thru 150 and the grand Hallels are in the center of the psalms. the word means tall in French also and Hallel being much taller than most...this is humorous to the community! As a mother I am happy for her choice to be with the community of the lamb to see her happiness and joy... her face lights up in a way that cannot be anything but genuine happiness!

Finally I leave the nest!

I loved being with my family so much that finally after I had become an nurse - 4 years of college and lived at home... got a job at Hennipen County Medical center on the Neurolgoy station... and just went along day to day at home with my family including 10 yonger siblings... One day my mom asked me if I had ever thought of getting my own place... Oh, I tought... that is maybe something I should think about. I then rented a third floor of a house just a block from my parents' home. It was great! Close to my beloved family...yet my own place!

John with Bertha at the State Fair a few years back

Bertha took reserve champion with her calf in the cow-calf division a couple times for John at the State Fair... You can always count on Bertha! 4 H was a wonderful thing for our kids... It was the one time that they learned about livestock on a day to day basis with their dad. They also learned a lot of life skills including how to present themselves in front of people... this has developed into John's future wishes for a life profession... Ag and presenting himself to large groups of people however that all comes together... Lord hear our prayer for a long and bright future for John with you always number one in his life!

Quiet days of growth and reflection on "the farm"

Filled with love and excitement and joy as I studied Catholicism in the quiet of Wisconsin farm country... I expressed it with photoraphy, sketching, caligraphy, reading and marveling at the depth of the Church and all that I will be learning for the rest of my life! I will never come to the end of the learning and growing with OUr Lord and His Mother and all the saints at my side!

Two 5 month losses - both boys born after John - buried at the cemetary

William and John would have been very close in age - about 14 months... I went in for my 5 month check up and the heartbeat couldn't be found... an ultrasound revealed that he had died... I had some scary miscahrriages, so the thought of carrying him til I "lost" him was terrifying to me. I went through a 5 month abortion procedure to deliver my son. I had a postagladin suppository inserted and went through a horrible experience with pain and chills to deliver our tiny son,William. I held him wrapped in a blanket, and Pat and I shed tears at what could have been. It was winter and the ground was frozen...we took him home in a small box and put it in the freezer.. So hard to open it and face him and have the memories and tears come flooding me again. About two years later the same thing unexplainably happened... We lost Robert the same time and way... "It looks like his cord is fatally kinked." It was earth shattering to face another loss of a son and brother for John here on this earth... WE know that we have these children to be united with someday! These and the other 4 lost along the jounrney of our "nest". I feel that they were both the best and the worst years of my life! How I prayed that the Lord would give me one more child after John so that the world would see visible truth that "no, we were't just trying for our boy and that is why we ended up with 5 children! We were open to family!" Yet I am flooded with peace and even joy to know that all our children are with us whether here on earth and in heaven! I have named each of my children in heaven... Christopher lost between Ruth and Nancy, Thomas lost when my sister Mary died of Lymphoma in 1986, Joseph lost before John, William and Robert lost at 5 mo after John, and Mary lost at 3 1/2 mo in 1994. The prayer for them of their mother is a powerful experience for me as I remember them daily and many times feel that they are up there keeping me on the straight and narrow as much as possible. All I know is that I must need a lot of help to have that small spiritual army in heaven....

Journey towards trust

Heading to Sioux Falls two days after Father's day - John had an abnomal MRI - what can it be? Daisys from the ditch, Mary from the give away box at church represents her comforting us at this scarey time... the family pic taken the weekend before in St Paul... pasted in Susan as she was in France - yet we were united in spirit and soon Susan came to be with the family as we discovered that he had a "tumor" in his brain! Jesus we trust inYou!

John and his 4 sisters.... When asked the family he wants someday... "I want 4 girls and a boy!'

John surrounded by his loving older sisters... all 4 of them. "Mom, why don't I have any brothers?" Yet, he admits that he was very spoiled by his sisters! He considers them a blessing and now has brothers... two brother in laws... Paul and Joe... and fraternity brothers at Farmhouse Fraternity at the U of M! Now brothers and sisters are everywhere... and such an amazing support for John on the journey called cancer/healing.

"Eating their chin" out of love - Child for it's mother

Top Ruth being kissed by her daughter, Mary.... Jesus loved his Mother sooooooooo much!

Mary's perspective....

How can we ever suffer as much with our Lord as His Mother did?.... the "sword the pierced her heart"... so that she may support us and hold us close in those times of suffering in our lives... As a mother holds her young and gives it the unconditional nurturing love only a mother gives with all her heart and soul, with no thought to herself....

The five in 1991

Maria's first communion party... the 5 in a row... Ruth, Nancy,Maria, Susan and John

Thankful and prayerful for healing - John is cancer free!

Tuesday at Benediction - John basks in the forgiving loving presence of His Lord... the healing loving Great Physician! Jesus we trust in You! Feb 2010

All my children together in the more simple days!

A watercolor I did after I got an idea from a greeting card showing a mother on the hill with 3 girls and a cow.. made it my own by adding another daughter, a son and my own building site behind us.... someone asked later where Pat, my husband was so I added him on a horse going off to work the farm... Also added my 6 losses in the "cemetary"... it was nice to include all my children in this way.

A therapy painting after 5 losses

A watercolor I did with the 5 "boys" that I lost from 3mo pregnant to 5mo.. I wanted them all to be in some way touching me and that we would be together on a bench in heaven... later added a photo to represent the 6th loss

The five that we are blessed to have with us here... Six losses with us in Heaven - Family of 11!

Ruth, Nancy, Maria, Susan - Little Sister Hallel, and John

Our 9 precious grandchildren, with another one on the way

I got a call today from daughter number 3 that I needed to update my grandchildren picture - the number had doubled since... So here are the 9 together with Hallel when she visited in April. Ruth has 4 with another on the way - Simon age 8, Mary age 7, David soon to be 5, and Rose 13 months. Nancy has Augustine 2, and Bernadette 7 months. Maria has 3 children... Therese 5, David 3, and Patrick 8 months! So this is almost a complete picture except for Maria's two losses due to miscarriage, who are in heaven. We love all life we have been blessed with here and in heaven, and pray for each daily. Guardian Angels watch out for them. Jesus, we Trust in YOU.

New life on the farm

Calving begins in the Feb cold weather... first calf for this mother cow - we call it a first calf heifer

About Me

I am first and foremost a wife and mother. My husband,Pat, is a farmer in SW Minnesota... he is large on the crops and he also has over 100 cows that he calves out. I am a nurse, but was able to take 14 years off to raise my 5 children. I then returned to a hospice nurse position after my son, John, started school. I only work part time and keep busy with my family, a big garden with canning, yard work, involvement with my faith at the Catholic Church, and now grandkids living close by. I had the joy of watching my 3 grandkids while our oldest daughter worked half time as a nurse at the hospital in town. This past summer our lives were rocked when we discovered that our youngest, John, age 20 had a very rare form of brain cancer. Since Father's day... I have become his nurse and between his father and I... we have been with him for many different treatments in Rochester... the cancer is now in remission and we are hopeful to pick up life from here with all of us healthy and looking forward to many years ahead!

An interesting fact about the cows and calves in the pastures... Cow trails...

These two pairs are demostrating how they all walk in the same path or trail...If you look on the other side of the hill above them you can see a cow trail that they use on that side of the pasture. When you go out and walk in the pasture... you will see these paths that are very much used to the point that they are deep and there is no grass growing in them just like a well used people trail gets to be. On a very steep hill there can be teraces of many cow trails along the side where they will go single file like these two moms with their calves following along behind... I did see some of the calves get tired of the slow pace and run ahead, but it is obvious, when you see the trails,that the cows use them for the most part to get from one place in the pasture to another. How my husband loves to see them out there in the lush grass getting fat off of the grass that grows where no crops can due to the up and down land or the creeks that run through them and are also important for the cows and calves to get the water they need just like every living creature! My husband's idea of a romantic evening is to go out on the 4 wheeler or the pickup to look at the cows and calves in the 6 different pastures that we have! The kids have fond memories of going out to look at the cows in the back of the pickup - great vacation/family time!

It doesn't get much cuter than this - Ruth Ida Rose with a forever remembered baby kitty...

Ruth used this on her graduation card - so Ruthie as she was forvere an animal lover. She has a calmness about her that just makes animals comfortable. A few days ago she was out helping her dad and brother and I watched her kids... they both agreed that Ruth is good help out there with the cows and on top of it.. .. she enjoys her time out there... I think that I will watch the kids and Ruth can be out there from now on!

The Net team stops by as they come to the end of their year of serving Catholic Youth!

Our nephew, Sam Cross, has taken a year out of his life to work on the National Evagelical Team - they are Catholic Youth in their late teens and early 20s that travel the country in a van giving retreats to youth everywhere! Their homebase in St Paul, but they have traveled from coast to coast this last year and they themselves are from many places in the country and even a girl from Netherlands! In the picture Sam is standing all the way to the left by John. He lived with us a summer and learned about the farm and was in 4 H and FFA here. He showed cattle and pigs at the county fair and then went up to the State Fair with his projects and then worked in the Miracle of Birth barn for a couple of summers. Sam is a special nephew! He also has done many TEC retreats after he said yes to our request that he make a retreat and absolutely fell in love with TEC! Now he has taken it a step further in serving on this traveling retreat team with his guitar and wonderful joyful spirit... touching many youth along with the 10 youth that are on the team with him. Just before this picture was taken... Sam had given them rides back and forth on the loader to "see" the cows and farm scenes... Sitting to the far right of the tractor in the loader bucket is a girl from Minnesota named, Sarah. We struck up a conversation in the kitchen while I was cleaning up after the meal that we had shared... She started the conversation by asking me if I had always lived in Mn... I thought that I would wow her by starting off by saying; "No, actually I was born in Boston, Mass!" Her reply; "So was I!" That was a start of the most amazing give and take between us! We share so much in common and mostly I thought that she was probably me about 40 years ago when I was a new Catholic and so in love with EVERYTHING about the Catholic Church! She shared that her family of 4 girls and one boy and both of her parents converted from Episcopal to Catholic and why would you belong anywhere but the True Church!? ! Wow! I was blown away to meet someone on this long journey I have been on that is at the same place I was at that age! All of these youth are so amazing and I hope and pray and am really confident that they have touched deeply and positively many youth on their trek across the country! I asked the girl from Netherlands about the Catholic Church in her country... I have heard that it barely exists any more and she agreed that only the old attend church and otherwise those that are Catholic like her go with their families at EAster and Christmas... her friend told her that she would do the NET as she had done ahead of her and now a young person is returning to this country without God... filled with love and knowledge of her Church - Jesus and His Mother - It was a wonderful hour and a half and gave me so much hope for the Church and how the grassroots are strong and spreading our faith far and wide! Thank you Lord for all the work that is taking place in your church and please continue to use me and all those that are listening to and answering your call! Amen and Halleluia!

John the actor and his love of the stage and being in front of people - It was a fun ride!

This was John doing the "She thinks my tractor is attractive" skit for Arts In at the county fair in 4H a few years back... It is just so fun to see him in his element and it always amazed us to see how relaxed he was up there. Not like any of the rest of us! Now he hopes to take that love of the stage and put it along with his Ag background into some type of a job for his future... It will certainly be interesting to follow along and now with a year overcoming brain cancer and all that has meant for him... it has certainly taken him to a deeper and more compassionate place... We all await what the future will bring... Thank you John for all the FUN we have had following you as you share the joy with us on stage! It has been a fun ride! Jesus we know that you are in control of John's life and have a wonderful plan just for him! Jesus we trust in You!

Oh happy day! Another fun time with John...

First with a talent show at the Catholic School doing...Oh happy day from Sister Act and then again for 4 H share the fun... Finally with chior robes that we found at the Thrift store and with his sister, Maria, and cousins, Sam and Phil Cross... we enjoy the fun at Christmas camp. John even put it on for Easter when we went to visit Maria in the monastery. We shared a meal through the enclosure and John did the entertainment for all of us by putting on a chior robe and lip sincing.... Oh happy day for all of us... it was great entertainment that was good over and over!

He who follows me will not walk in darkness but will have the light of life. Jn 8:12

I came across this inside of a long letter that our daughter, Maria, had written daily to share her experience with us as she went from a Poor Clare Monastery in Sauk Rapids, Mn to one close to Washington DC... It was so hard to think that she could go so far away to a cloistered monastery... where we would have to go and see her there and never get a hug as she would be in the "enclosure". It was to the point of her entering and the mother superior asked her to write a letter saying that this was the right thing for her to do... she couldn't write it and was back home! We were shocked and amazed! After saying goodbye to her life... she returned and embraced it! I will never forget her out helping put the cows and calves out to pasture and saying how wonderful it was to be out there... Now that was a miracle! So often on this journey we have been weak, depressed, scared and lost... The image of Jesus picking up the weak lost lamb is so often coming to me... This is wonderful to be able to share here with all of you that are upholding us in prayer!

A miracle! We make it to France in the midst of John's brain cancer and after a brain biopsy!

One of my favorite pictures from France...Susan helping John walk through the rain down a path at Saint-Pierre. They have always had a close relationship... Susan was 3 1/2 years older than John... I lost two pregnancies between them and it was never kept from the kids... we all grieved together at the losses. Susan was thrilled with her little brother from day one. She was constantly caring for him and watching out for him. We have a family story that Susan saved John's life... I will save that for a later date to share. John discovered in France that he could walk at a normal speed leaving his walker behind and having someone under his weak side. I think that he enjoyed the closeness also. We were in France and it was totally due to prayer!

The way of the cross - Cancer strikes our 20 year old son!

John at Lourdes with his two sisters... LS Hallel in the habit she had just received as a new member of the community of the Lamb and Nancy. From the back as they support their brother it looks like he is on the cross. After the news about two months earlier that he had brain cancer and then the ataxia on his left side as a result of the biopsy they had to do to diagnose it... It certainly a cross like no other we could have ever imagined! Beyond our wildest nightmares! Just the day before we left for France he was able to get to the bathroom by himself for the first time! We could go to France to see his sister join the community, and go to Lourdes and bath in the miraculous and healing waters under the watchful care of our most Blessed Virgin Mother of God... Mary Most Holy! John truly turned from a heavy heart to one of hope at this point in the journey.

Little Sister Hallel here for Thanksgiving and spent a week with John.

A group shot over at Ruth and Paul's place... Little Sister Hallel - Susan here for a week. Took John back and forth to radiation, and we then had a family Thanksgiving up in the Cities with her other two sisters that live in ST Paul... Getting ready to head back to Kansas City. That is where she is living for the next year in the only community here in the US... Community of the Lamb... pictured are from left to right... Paul Lanoue, Ruth Lanoue, Little Sister Hallel, her dad Pat and John Verly. In front Mary with her kitty Purrrrrrs.

The two Davids...

Great Grandma with both Davids after Sunday mass in her sunroom- Feb 21,2010

Our prayers rise like incense before you, Our Lord and Our God!

Benediction on Tuesday night.... Giving our Lord honor and praise and worship! We are in awe of you coming to us in the humble form of bread... as it is transformed into your Body... food that gives us the strength to follow your example and embrace the cross in our lives! Jesus we trust in You! We honor and adore you now and forever! Amen