Lape Soetan: How To Meet Men When You Don’t Go Out Much

In January of this year, I sent out a survey and one of the commonest things that women put down in the survey was, “I don’t go out much. How can I meet more men?” Now, if you’ve been watching my videos for a while, you’ll know that my biggest tip on how to meet more men is to go out more often. However, if you’re like the women that answered my survey and you don’t go out much but you want to meet more men then you should stay tuned and watch this entire video because in this video, I’ll be sharing tips on how you can meet more men when you don’t go out much.

To watch the video, click on the image below.

Prefer to read rather that watch the video? Here’s what’s in it:

Let’s begin! My 1st tip on how you can meet more men when you don’t go out much is to change your routine. Change the time that you leave home for work, change the time that you leave work, change the day that you buy your groceries, change the time that you go for your church service. Just change your routine. Changing your routine changes the way you think and it also brings you in contact with new sets of people. This means that you’ll make more friends, you’ll meet new people and then, you’ll meet more men in the process. Look at your current routine and turn things around.

My 2nd tip is to pay attention to the people that you DO meet. Meeting guys or meeting the right guy for you is not a straightforward thing. It’s not likely that what will happen is that you go somewhere, you see a guy you like, he asks you for your phone number and before you know it, you guys get married. It hardly ever happens like that. In fact, I don’t think it ever happens like that. It’s not a straightforward thing.

What is more likely to happen is something like: you make a new friend at the cinema, she invites you to her house on her birthday, when you go there, you meet her female cousin and then a few weeks later, you go to the bank and you meet that same cousin with a colleague of hers who is a guy, the guy then asks her for your phone number and contacts you, you guys start dating and it looks like he might be the right guy for you.

Can you see how complicated it is? It’s never a straightforward thing but the thing is that you wouldn’t have met that guy if you hadn’t let your guard down and made friends with the girl that was standing behind you in the popcorn queue at the cinema. Pay attention to the people you meet – men AND women. Broaden your horizon and open up your world so that you can meet more men.

My 3rd tip on how to meet more men if you don’t go out much is to take advantage of social media. These days, with Instagram and Facebook, it’s even easier to meet men. If somebody should like a picture of yours or something like that, go and check out his account. See if he is your kind of person. If somebody sends you a message that makes sense not just a message that says ‘nice pic’ or ‘Send me a picture of your boobs’. Nothing like that. If someone sends you a message that makes sense, don’t immediately assume that he’s an idiot. See if you guys can talk and if you guys get along. You never know what will happen.

I have to give some caution here though. You have to realise that people can lie very well on social media. It’s just something that is easy to do so you have to be careful. The guy that you might be talking to on social media that is saying he is single might actually be a married man with four children. Another thing that you have to do or that makes life easier for you is that when you start chatting with somebody on social media and you find yourself liking him, try to meet as soon as possible in real life. There’s no point in keeping the relationship you have going online. Don’t keep it going online for long.

If you’ve been chatting with a guy for 2 weeks, insist that you meet in real life. This is so that you don’t get attached to somebody that, in real life, you’re not attracted to. If you don’t meet the guy within 2 weeks, there’s a chance that you will get attached to somebody that when you meet in real life, is not somebody that you like. People, on social media, can be very different from how they come across in real life so you have to be circumspect.

I hope these tips have given you ideas on how to meet men when you don’t go out much. If you want daily tips from me on love and relationships, follow me on Instagram. Also, I have a ton of free e-books for you on relationships and love and being happy while single. You can get them by clicking here. Please share this blog post with your friends and also subscribe to my YouTube channel. After you click on the ‘subscribe’ button on YouTube, also click on the bell that you’ll see so that you’ll be notified when a new video of mine comes out. I wish you love and strength.

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Lape Soetan is a UK-certified relationship coach. She helps single women over 30 attract and keep the right relationship while building lives they love. Ms Soetan is the author of several books and details of her work can be found on www.lapesoetan.com