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My friends and I had Ladies’ Night last night which involved a little bit of cooking, curling our hair, and lots of champagne. I decided to make an appetizer, but after surfing the Web for recipes for an hour the night before, I became really overwhelmed. I e-mailed my aunt Linda who owns Port D’Hiver Bed and Breakfast in Melbourne Beach, FL (shameless plug, I know) and asked her for suggestions. She sent me this recipe for a delicious chicken alfredo roll.

Ingredients:

small jar of alfredo sauce

small pack of cooked chicken breast

medium bag of mozzarella cheese

tube of rolled pizza dough (usually next to the crescent rolls in the store)

(1) egg

(1/2) tsp. water

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 350.

Open tube, roll the pizza dough and flatten out a little. I usually do this on a cookie sheet sprayed with PAM.

Spoon the alfredo sauce thinly over the dough but leaving 1 inch border around the edge.

Chop the chicken breast into little pieces and sprinkle over sauce (you can add canned mushrooms to this step if you like them and it dresses it up a bit).

Then sprinkle a good amount of cheese over this.

Beginning at the short end, carefully roll the pizza dough just like you would a sleeping bag. When you finish pinch the ends to seal in the sauce.

Whisk egg and water in a small bowl. Brush egg mixture (called an “egg wash”) over the dough. This step is optional, but it makes the roll much prettier.

Bake for 20 minutes.

Let sit for 5- 10 minutes before you slice it or it will be too gooey.

NOTE:

You can throw all kinds of stuff in there, whatever you have leftover. You can shop an onion, red and green peppers, zucchini or squash and saute or microwave it with a little butter for a few minutes until soft and sprinkle it in with the chicken. Or get a can of little black olives and sprinkle those around. Have left over cooked broccoli? Chop it up and throw it in there. The more the merrier!

If there’s one thing I can say about the writing majors, it’s that we pay very close attention in class. Not necessarily to take notes on the lectures (although we do that too), but mostly, we wait for our professors to say something hilarious so we can write it down and savor it, or for many, Tweet it. These one-liners are what we live for, and they make the 12-hour day of classes go by much faster.

Here is my collection of quotes from this Winter quarter.

Lough:

“It’s like comparing apples to oranges and that’s not very fruitful.”

“Smells like tuna, tastes like chicken.”

“It’s a dumbass religion” – on Rastafarianism

“I just thought of a band: Sudan Somers.”

“How can you turn down billionairism?”

“Hyenas have dildos.”

“Jesus could not drive a stick.”

“This is one big incest fest: Incestival.”

Beth:

“Travis doesn’t play Second Life. He’s barely interested in his one life.”

I borrowed all of these images from my new favorite Web site, ThisIsWhyYou’reFat.com. Isn’t it funny how some things can make you extremely grossed out, but also strangely hungry at the same time? In the spirit of being fat, I dug up some old photos of creations made at Fat Wednesday–a family tradition that began at Robbie Ripoll‘s house more than three years ago. Here’s what I found:

An 8 lb. turkey burger in the making

Although I wasn’t at this particular Fat Wednesday (thanks SCAD), Oz updated me periodically with pictures. They baked the buns with four boxes of bread, two for each half, and combined eight pounds of ground turkey (ironic?) to make the patty. Then it was time to dig in.

As you can see, the burger turned into quite the hot mess.

While we’re on the subject of the fattest foods ever, let take a trip on down to Taco Town!