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Baby daddy drama

So my son is almost 1 year old and I haven't seen or talked to the dad since I was three months pregnant. He does drugs and is not good for my child so in order for me to get full custody I was instructed by my attorney to wait till my son was 1 get the dad for abandonment, dealing drugs, and what not. I haven't been around my home town, where the dad lives just so he doesn't want to all the sudden be back in the picture and so i've been I guess you could say "Hiding". Well I met a guy that lives in my home town and I kinda explained the situation and he is really weirded out by the whole "hiding" thing. I don't want the guy to leave me but at the same time is it worth risking what i've done so far to get custody? Ugh i just don't know and some days I think that I want to go back to the dad ( but i won't :)) I just dream about it and I can't get him out of my head. I wish I woud have been older and married before having kids. I dont know why the dad wont just move away and get his own life. Out of jealousy I check up on him on facebook to see if he's dating anyone or what he's doing in his life and everytime he gets a new girlfriend I almost want to kill her because I do not want her to be my sons step mom. ( I know half the girls he dates and believe me they are not good girls ) Ugh why do i even care it's been so long since I even talked to that looser I just cant get him out of my head. I cant' get anything done GRR. :( Help someone just talk to me so i can stop thinking about him. !!!!!!

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