Darlings, it was the 2011 National Board of Review Awards in NYC and the stars all tried their damnedest to look chic and stylish instead of tacky and attention-seeking. Seriously, it’s interesting how there’s a sort of style hierarchy to awards season. Everyone’s going to look like a drag queen come Golden Globes and Oscar time, but right now the look is a bit more understated and self-consciously fashion-y.

Ahna O’Reilly

A striking and pretty dress, but unfortunately the lines across her bust aren’t very flattering, giving her uni-boob.

Chloe Moretz in Miu Miu

Brava, sweetie. Dress like a teenager while you’re still a teenager, we say.

Or rather, dress like a teenager who’s been given free rein to wear any high end designer clothing she wants. Obviously, the average teen isn’t walking through the local mall looking like this. Our point is, you won’t confuse this with a Helen Mirren dress.

Emma Stone in J. Mendel

It’s pretty and chic (if a little wrinkled), but the colors seem kind of off for this time of year.

Felicity Jones in Dolce & Gabbana

Girl, that is SO not your dress since we know you’re a tiny little slip of a girl who right now looks quite a bit like a tree trunk wearing ankle straps.

Helen Mirren

Fabulous. Well done, Dame.

Jessica Chastain in Zac Posen

She doesn’t always make the best choices, but this is a really striking dress. Unfortunately, she ruins the effect with a heavy pair of shoes. Also, we don’t like the straps.

Keira Knightley in Nina Ricci

VERY fashion-y. In fact, she looks more like a well-appointed editor than a movie star here.

Michael Fassbender

The suit is pressed and clean, and that’s (sadly) a step in the right direction for him. That it’s a little tight on him is a quibble. Baby steps.

Naomi WattsWe keep staring at it, waiting for something to happen.

Octavia Spencer in David Meister

DEFINITELY found herself a new stylist. Looking fine, girl. But now you need to hire a makeup artist.

Rooney Mara in Miu Miu

Love it. She’s both robot girl and pretty princess in one outfit. A blending of the two personae she’s been working all month.

Shailene Woodley in L’Wren Scott

She looks like she just realized she’s underdressed. It’s a pretty dress, but it definitely needs something to bump it up for the event. Some jewelry and a kickier pair of shoes would have gone a long way, as would getting rid of the yoga hair and going for something more polished. It looks like she aimed for “low key chic” and hit “too casual” instead.

Stacy Kleiber in Marchesa and George Clooney

CEO and trophy wife.

Tilda Swinton

Divine. The pants are a little big, but we love the colors on her.

Viola Davis in Lauren by Ralph Lauren

She (or her stylist) have an impeccable sense of what colors work best on her. We love a red and gold combo. But girl, you’re back to the mushroom wig. That’s disappointing.

Tilda Swinton’s outfit is gorgeous, but the pants look like they’ve been folded up in a box for a year.

http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

Unfortunately satin weave things always end up wrinkling awfully easily. The only way to have avoided this would’ve been to hop into those pants instants before getting out of the limo.

Anonymous

I still think someone needs to combine a limo with a floral-delivery van so stars can stand up on their way to these events when they are wearing wrinkle-prone clothes. They could strap in like on the Tilt-a-Whirl

http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

The image you just created in my head is truly guffaw worthy. I imagine them in rows, held slightly above the floor in huge c shaped clamps, with their arms dangling over them. That way they don’t get wrinkled and the hems of those gowns don’t get soiled. Gents must check their jackets, and pick them up as they leave.

Anonymous

Delurking to say, that I believe Sir Elton did that, when he was dressed as Marie Antoinette for one of his epic parties. He rode to the party in the back of a flower delivery truck, because it was the only vehicle that had room for his wig..

Anonymous

During the Hollywood heyday, movie sets had leaning boards for the stars to recline on as to not wrinkle their gowns. Hell, they probably still have them. Search Google Images for “hollywood movie leaning boards”.

Anonymous

I did as bidden and searched Google images. So cool!! Of course, then I went down the time-sucking rabbit hole of drooling over 1930s and ’40s gowns… Thanks!

Anonymous

I am laughing my ass off at the tilt-a-whirl picture you just put into my head. Well done!!!

Anonymous

Agreed! That said, her hair looks FANTASTIC! I really really love that cut with her face & overall style.

Anonymous

Oh Helen! You got your mojo back.

Anonymous

Love the dress TONS but the hair is way too “Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, Wrecker of Marriages” for me.

foodycat

Felicity Jones and Jessica Chastain can both be serving wenches in a theatre restaurant if the bigger gigs don’t work out. I think Octavia Spencer’s makeup doesn’t need as much help as her facial expressions do. A smile or even a smize would make all the difference!

http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

Precisely the same look on her face as yesterday. She really doesn’t seem to want to smile at these events. Okay girl, you don’t like these things, we’re fine with that, but its part of your JOB.

Alisa Rivera

I think she just looks really, really nervous. This is her big spotlight moment and she probably feels the pressure.

Anonymous

And I think it’s possible that she doesn’t like her smile, a la Vickie Beckham, so she doesn’t deploy it. Just a theory.

http://twitter.com/algaechick Crystal

Seriously. I don’t know much about Octavia, but every picture I think “does she have bad teeth or something”?
She’s been looking fantastic other than the pissy expressions.

I feel like if we criticize Tilda, she’ll somehow know, and kill us with her brain (She is THAT bad-ass)

Anonymous

Naomi Watts is wearing a blackboard so she can get everyone’s autographs on it.

I disagree on Rooney this time because something about that dress is reminding me of some part of a nun’s habit (albeit a short habit). And Fassbender can wipe that little grin off his face because he looks like a sausage stuffed into that tiny jacket.

Tilda is fab all the way. And I want to rip the Dame’s dress off her hot body and put it on mine. Love it. (Though I do not like her poodle hair; she looks better with it sleeker.)

I don’t know if Octavia is competing with jolly Jolie for the “above it all” look, but it is seriously not working. She looks like she’s constipated and it is detracting from her otherwise very appealing looks. Cheer up lady.

She’s hilarious as hell on talk shows. Just saw her on Kimmel last week, and she was a hoot. I think she’s just not so much a red carpet veteran who is experienced in serving superstar realness to every angle.

MilaXX

Here’a better picture of her. I just wish I could get a larger version of it.

i think she actually said “in a sock”, but its hard to unsee it once you conjure up the image

Anonymous

Tilda! That is an absolutely stunning outfit. Helen’s dress is interesting and flattering and fabulous. Viola looks beautiful but her boobs are a little too liberated. Jessica Chastain is always a little sloppy and this outfit is no exception. Chloe’s dress seems heavy and wrinkly. Emma needs to work on her posture. Octavia looks great, and this should make her smile but for some reason does not. But Felicity: all these people managed to look pretty and look sane, except for you, Dear. Go home and change. And comb your hair.

http://twitter.com/susanpcollier Susan Collier

Is Alexa Chung performing stand-in duties for Keira Knightley nowadays?
The Naomi Watts dress is making me laugh and laugh. I need a 3D hologram in there, like the magic mirror in Snow White.

Rachel Sawyer

For a split second I thought Swinton was Austin Scarlett and frankly I think Austin would look better in her outfit.

Anonymous

Viola Davis wins!
Also like Jessica Chastain, but I agree the shoes are all wrong. She Naomi and Octavia must have the same stylist who got a bulk deal on black shoes with heavy ankle straps.

lilibetp

At least Shailene’s hair isn’t parted just over her ear as they do it on the show… That drives me crazy. If your hair is parted in the right place, you won’t constantly be having to shake it out of your eyes, right?

I just want to say how much I love you two- your posts are always the best way to start a morning. Brava darlings!

Anonymous

Ditto Ditto Ditto. TLo you are the best. You are so ON with this posting.

Anonymous

Octavia, would it kill you to smile? You look beautiful, does that help?

Cathy S

Normally I don’t even notice these things, but does Viola Davis need a better bra? That’s a pretty dress, but it’s looking kind of strange in the bust.
Helen Mirren’s hair is soooo pretty and soft-looking.
I want that L’Wren Scott dress so much.

foodycat

I think you are right – it needs a better bra. She did in the bronze shift she wore the other day too, so it’s probably time for her to get properly fitted!

Anonymous

Ooooh, now I can’t unsee Viola Davis’ odd and sad looking bust.

Anonymous

I wonder if Naomi Watts’ dress isn’t actually a portal to an alternate universe where George Clooney doesn’t look like a complete douchebag.

foodycat

I was thinking penseive, but portal it is! However, it successfully distracts from those heavy shoes, so it’s a partial win.

BerlinerNYC

That’s how we’ll get to Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and her Wardrobe.

Anonymous

Too bad I couldn’t like you multiple times for the C.S. Lewis reference!

Anonymous

Tilda and Helen win this, hands down.

Anonymous

I actually like that wig on Viola Davis as it perfectly frames her face. She looks great.

Anonymous

Felicity Jones looks like a goth tree trunk. Fassbender always looks like a bobblehead on the RC, though probably not his fault. Mostly love Swinton’s look. Good to see Dame Helen looking fierce again. Octavia darling, smile. You’ve got such a lovely, infectious smile ya know?

Anonymous

It’s nice to see so many celebs looking attractive, instead of sloppy and/or crazy. Love Tilda’s Katherine Hepburn chic–I’ve spent hours of my life trying to make a silk shirt drape that perfectly, with much less success.

Octavia Spencer must learn to smile. Even just a little. Even if it’s just “smizing.”

Most of the shoes are awful. Sad to see clompers again–I thought we were done with those–and adding ankle straps to clompers doesn’t make anything pretty happen to your legs.

Keira Knightly looks a bit like a drag queen here. The make up is too harsh for her face.

BerlinerNYC

Except no self-respecting drag queen would wear that butt-ugly dress. It may be “fashion-y,” but that is some serious fug.

Anonymous

Octavia Spencer looks like she’s thinking “All of this had better fucking pay off with a Oscar nomination.” Naomi Watts’s dress looks like something’s missing — like interest. I’ll dissent slightly on Viola Davis only because I don’t think that dress flatters her bust as much as it might; wrong foundation garments, I suspect. Also, I think you’re giving Tilda Swinton a pass on her wrinkly pants.

Anonymous

Jones is wearing Helena Bonham Carter’s dress. Swinton and Knightley are my faves here. Spencer and Davis look great, too. They need to have one more person from that movie attend these things so I can call them The Spencer Davis Trio.

http://twitter.com/bredalot Bridget Smith

Emma Stone, Jessica Chastain. Take your pick!

Anonymous

Thanks. I realized after I posted that, one of the other stars at this event was most likely in the movie, but I couldn’t be arsed to go back and look.

Actually, The Spencer Davis Group was originally a quartet, so I’ll take both!

Anonymous

SWINTON FTW, but I really love the L’Wren Scott dress…not necessarily in this application and with this styling, but the dress is very cool.

Anonymous

I don’t think Michael is wearing undies again. Hooray for that.

Anonymous

Oh, good catch, and upon a second look, I do believe your right. I just saw “Shame” where it is more than obvious that he’s packing a wallop.

Anonymous

I think Helen Mirren’s dress looks like an ugly piece of furniture. Do not like.

http://www.facebook.com/foodhussy Heather Johnson

Just realized I had a dream where I met Stacy and was like “Aw girl – I’ve seen you with my husband George! Don’t be tryin ta steal MY MAN” – then I woke up, realized I wasn’t black and wasn’t married to George. Bummer.

Victoria Sharoyan

That might be the best I’ve seen Helen Mirren look! Gorgeous dress and hair!

Love Ocatavia’s dress so much it took a second look to decide that the shoes make her feet and legs look odd.

Either the angle is just really bad or Chloe is wearing 6 inch heels and looks like she is going to fall forward.

Over all I like more of the looks her

Helen – Fantastic and Viola stood out. I do like Naomi’s dress

I am surprised (well maybe not with her so often getting a pass) on no comments on the shiny wrinkle-y pants that Tilda is wearing

https://profiles.google.com/104791269167429064986 Judy S

Actually gasped at Swinton. Wow. Helen Mirren, in her very different way, looks great too. I watched a Youtube interview with her the other day, when she was maybe 20; I think she must dress with the idea, “Would I be glad when I was 20 to be going to become the woman I see in the mirror?”

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EDI2DLE7DE3YPW2ONIHBWOVHMA ecallaw

I LOVE Viola in some color, but i really wish she would buy some better bras. I also LOVE Naomi Watt’s dress, but those shoes are hiddy. Bow down to Dame Mirren.

Anonymous

Once again I found Rooney Mara to be incredibly boring. I don’t have anything against the woman, but she bores me to tears.

http://twitter.com/madamesuggia Madame Suggia

Love La Swinton, but do not love the shiny-shiny forehead…power down girlfriend!

Katie Fennelly

Oh My God, the tree trunk line is genius.

Anonymous

Tilda Swinton FTW!!!

Anonymous

I love Naomi Watts’ look, though you’re right: it looks like the black area should be emanating some kind of psychedelic colored water-and-oil show.

Anonymous

LOL Shailene Woodley. Can you say “out of her league”!? May I remind everyone of the television show she was/is on before her movie with George. She needs some coaching about this kind of thing AND QUICKLY.

Anonymous

helen needs to keep her hair like that always. J’ADORE.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3KCDEX4FOTCFHZP6WLKSOOKUVM Danielle

Naomi Watts looks like she’s wearing a picture frame.

Anonymous

I seriously think you are calling her “Kleiber” on purpose now, just to make me laugh. Thanks, it works every time!

I have never been on the Tilda Train. Until today. Sold.

Anonymous

I’m still not on the TIlda Train. I’ve never understood the love. I think I’m the only one.

Anonymous

Not at all – I have been confused by it. Truly don’t understand it.
She reminds my of Conan and I think she makes plenty of bad choices – approaching the Emperor level

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=167100010 Meghan Young

Why did Felicity Jones steal HBC’s dress?

http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

Viola needs a better wig and a better bra.
Octavia SMILE dammit. They’re going to give Best Actress to Meryl and give Best Supporting to you – it’s in the bag – smile!
Stacy and Georgina together – my two least favorite people in the world – it’s perfect.
Tilda for the win; Keira, Rooney and Ahna for Honorable Mentions.

Anonymous

I really really want that L’Wren Scott dress.

Anonymous

I don’t think the Rooney Mara looks good at all in that dress. The proportions are off or something. The top looks like a giant, stiff, inverted triangle and the waist is floating, but the cut of the dress implies that the waistline should be more fitted (a perennial problem for her tiny frame). Nice to see Helen and Tilda back to form, though.

Anonymous

I’m actually disappointed with Ms. Mirren’s look…so matronly! She looks great, and sure, she is of the matronly age, but she usually has more flare and I think that’s missing here. Put Helen in Chloe Moretz’s Mui Mui dress, add a few inches to the hem, and she’d be rocking. 😉

Fire the photographer that took the pic of Roni Mara…her legs are so disproportionate to the rest of her it’s disturbing! A lot of the pics are really unflattering due to the camera angle. I don’t understand why a pro can’t get it right…(rant over lol)

Anonymous

matronly is now sheer skin colored illusion netting w/ strategically placed velvet dots? what a wonderful world we live is this newest of ones! otoh, i also think she could wear CM’s red dress. then again, i guess that is on the same hand.

i had a whole mess of minor comments swimming around in my tired mind–then i saw tilda swinton. has she ever looked better? are there a whole lot of people who ever have? other than the wrinkles, i mean. but the color scheme of the garments interlocks w/ the color scheme of herself in ways you rarely see anyone able to do. good & glorious, that.

Anonymous

Keira Knightley always disappoints. She’s a beatiful girl, but she always manages to look blah. That’s a great little dress, but she needed HAIR! MAKEUP! SHOES! JEWELRY! to pull the whole thing together. I mean look at her. She looks like she didn’t even bother to shower before the event. Just got up off the couch, threw that dress on and walked out the door. What’s with that hair? Jesus, Keira, I know you can afford a comb. Tsk.

Anonymous

Octavia Spencer is so gorgeous. Her clothes are sometimes a mess, but she’s beautiful. Ditto Viola Davis. I’m so glad to see their talent is finally getting the recognition it deserves. And you totally nailed it on George Clooney. They pose the same way together all the time, and it looks like his spine is shrinking. He probably can’t do anything about that, but i can see how he might be losing a lot of self-respect.

too tight and fassbender – there is no such thing as too tight. I wish they would PAINT his clothes on him and let him go down the RC that way.

MilaXX

Dayum! Octavia is looking good! Not only did she get a new stylist, but she needs to become besties with the people at David Meister because his clothes work on her body. She needs a warmer lip and maybe a touch of bronzer on the cheeks, but she’s looking good.

Anonymous

I actually kind of love the trophy wife dress. Isn’t her name Keibler, not Kleiber? Or did they mis-pronounce on DWTS?

Tilda looks fab, in my favorite purple. She DID need to deploy the Pope-Mobile, to arrive standing, and thus avoid the sit-down wrinkles on the pants.

I was really excited that Chloe Moretz wasn’t doing the duck face! And then scrolled down to see that it was probably because the Queen Duckface, Keira Knightly, was in the house.

Anonymous

Tilda for the WIN! I love it, the slightly oversized pants are intentional and look fab on her. I must disagree slightly with Chloe’s little red coat dress. I think Dame Helen could TOTALLY wear that right now and look smashing. Love her dress BTW, but why the Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall hair? I hope this doesn’t come off poorly but I kind of love the fact Octavia has a permanent “Oh, no she didn’t!!” look to her face.

Anonymous

It’s nice to see the Queen Helen of Fuckingfantastica is making a comeback. I was getting a little concerned.

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_6PUVFQ7YCZZFZRIER6BEJ4HVYE Amye

I’ll be George Cloooney’s trophy wife! Of course MY trophy husband might not like it.

Anonymous

The British ones look the best- Mirren, Knightley and Fassbender.

Anonymous

I’m honestly curious: how do you know Viola Davis is wearing a wig? It just looks like hair to me.

Jillian Liszewski

I always read her name as Stacy Geibler, which then makes me think of Kimmy Gibbler. That’s all.

Anonymous

Oh wow, this is the best Tilda has looked in a long time. Fabulous.

Why does Octavia look so unhappy at all of these events?

Allison Woods

The proportions of Kiera’s dress totally BUG.

Anonymous

For a second there, thought Felicity Jones was Eva Green . . .

Swinton looks terrific, even with wrinkled pants — elegant ease, gorgeous colors & textures.
An aside: Funny how the only fabric OK to be wrinkled during wear is linen (though we Americans seem to have ridiculously high wrinkle standards with that, too).

Ally Huang

Heehee… as soon as I saw the Michael Fassbender heading, I scrolled down to see if he’d forgotten the undies! Winner!

http://pulse.yahoo.com/_EUDL3XE5ODCERMBE5FOATN3KWI hanna

@TheOriginalLulu:disqus ………Would you like to work from home? Read more here: LazyCash4.com and you will find out how to get a nice income every month.

Anonymous

Helen Mirren would look great in that red dress, if she treated it like a tunic, with black slacks. That said, she looks awesome here.