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Full Release: Music

It’s the last new music release before Halloween, and if you’re looking for costume ideas, maybe you should try an Australian bonghit-battling rocker, a washed-up 80s hair metal rocker, Canadian lesbians, or, scariest of all, Scott Stapp. Let’s slap on the headphones and take a listen.

Wolfmother – Cosmic Egg– Have to say I’m a little trepidatious about this one. Australian hard rock band Wolfmother were pretty great on their last few slabs, but that was before 2/3 of the band left. Now singer/guitarist Andrew Stockdale is carrying the name alone, with a new trio backing him up. What I’ve heard doesn’t disappoint – massive, sludgy riffs, some absurd song structures, and a rumored collaboration with Slash. If you’ve got a bong, load it. If you’ve got a gas pedal, gun it.

Winger – Karma – Does anybody even still talk about karma anymore? I thought it was something like crystals or astral projection that white people with empty lives moved on from a while ago. Kip Winger, however, will never move on, and I love that little scamp for it. This is a Winger record, so you know what that means: New Jersey rejoices.

Tegan And Sara – Sainthood – Apparently people like this Canadian hot identical twin duo for their cunning songcraft, but I just can’t get over that they’re Canadian lesbian identical twins. Like, that’s something you make up to impress kids at camp in between stolen sips of Communion wine. It’s not even like a thing that’s real.

Creed – Full Circle – You know the sad thing about Creed? If you take away melodramatic Christian hosebag Scott Stapp, the actual band isn’t all that bad. Guitarist Mark Tremonti has some stiff riffs and the rest of the group is perfectly competent. It’s just when they trot out the sweaty, pathetic Stapp to do his faux-grunge yodel all over, they turn into the public joke that everybody knows they are. This album marks Stapp’s return to the group with a shaved head and microscopically more dignity. It’s not enough.

Train – Save Me San Francisco – Oh, wow, Creed isn’t the suckiest band with an album out this week.

Devendra Banhart – What Will We Be– I’ll tell you what you will be. You will be forever hated by me as a guy who got to bone Natalie Portman despite having a disgusting beard with food caught in it and making intolerable modern “freak-folk” music. God, I’m dirty and don’t know how to play the banjo, why aren’t I getting major Hollywood tail? Life ain’t fair.