Edd’s MANtra: Happy B’day To My Biggest Fan

I know I’m a little late (blame my ethnicity) but I couldn’t let another day go by without wishing a belated happy birthday to my favorite chanteuse, Blu Cantrell.

Blu and I go way back, and she loves me like a fat kid loves birthday cake.

Well, actually, more like a fat kid loves vegetables.

Last year this time, I dedicated one of my Whatever Happened to columns to her. But instead of a hearty “thanks” for my journalistic efforts, I was ripped apart by Blu and/or her minions (who can tell?). Man, they ran up on me in the comments section and on Twitter like the Putty Patrol from the Power Rangers. Among my many sins, the Blu Cru said I incorrectly reported Blu’s age. I claimed she was 34, but she was actually 32. My bad for being off target by so, so many years.

I think Blu’s buddies were also salty because I mentioned that explicit magazine Black Tail once showed racy pics of Blu’s black tail. But Blu has gone on record saying she’s cool with the photos, so I don’t know what the problem is.

Anyway, I promised to leave the past behind us and set things right this year. So Blu, I hope you had a very happy 33rd or 35th birthday! Hopefully she doesn’t have the Benjamin Button disease and isn’t 29 next year.

Oh, I kid, Blu. I love you and your many ages. You’re like a younger (or older) Blanche Devereaux.

To celebrate, let’s check out Blu’s best video. It was easy to pick cuz she only has like two videos.