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Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 29/2/2016

It’s time for another Kpopalypse roundup! Let’s check out some new releases for the past week!

Nutaz

Taemin – Press Your Number

SM’s usual slick sonic production but I’m not wild about the song itself. He’s certainly got the moves though, so I put up a dance video so you can appreciate it.

Cosmic Girls (WJSN) – MoMoMo

Disjointed and odd-sounding with too much clutter and messy harmony changes for a song selling itself as cutesy, resides in the same musical uncanny valley as recent songs by Twice, CLC and DIA.

CLC – High Heels

Speaking of which, CLC’s new song is also noise everywhere with an exceptionally crap blues-based chorus. Unlike the radio broadcast, this MV is only a short version but I wouldn’t be too upset about that if I were you.

Ladies Code – Galaxy

If it was too upbeat people would whine about it having an inappropriate party atmosphere after EunB and Rise died, but if it was too ballady people would accuse them of cashing in on sentiment. The agency pitches “Galaxy” right in the middle to keep everyone happy – except me, who doesn’t care about the politics of it and just wants them to get back to making cool songs like “Kiss Kiss” and “Hate You“. Maybe next time.

Mamamoo – You’re The Best

Slightly better than but very similar to the type of stuff that Sistar does these days. Also like Sistar, even if the songs suck at least they look great in the videos, which is all I really care about or expect from this group who consistently refuse to do another “Piano Man“.

4TEN – Severely

Here’s what KARA’s “Pandora” would sound like if you removed about 60% of the production money.

Bloomy – Blooming Day

Someone saw me and Asian Junkie arguing about girls and decided to shut us up by debuting a girl who looks like a cross between Raina and Jisook. Fuck, what are we going to do now.

Astro – Hide & Seek

Well, at least it’s upbeat, so that’s something, I guess.

Koh Nayoung – Whom

Very basic-sounding mid-paced rocker much like similar material by Taylor Swift etc. Boy Korea sure loves their unnecessarily processed guitar sounds with every last trace of dynamics removed.

BONUS SONGS

Teen Top – Don’t Drink

Here’s this week’s token awful Fender Rhodes-driven ballad.

Kixs – Please Come Back

Here’s this week’s other token awful Fender Rhodes-driven ballad, because there’s seemingly two of these coming out of Korea each and every week.

Jung Joon Young ft. Suh Young Eun – Sympathy

And just for a change here’s a ballad that doesn’t suck (completely), it only got left out of the show due to lack of time. Starts off as the usual poxy trash for idiots but evolves into a reasonable X Japan style lighter-waving torch rock song, which maybe more Korean ballad writers should think about trying.

Jinsil & Tablo – Dododo

Dull rap at trip-hop speed but without the sonic architecture that makes trip-hop interesting. Oh and stupid R&B vocals, because every slow Korean rap song has to have shit R&B vocals all over it.

Lee Young Hyun – Return

Apink – Brand New Days

Apart from a few superficial electronic whoops and bleeps, sounds exactly the same as every other Apink song ever.

Yoon Mirae – Because Of You

If Yoon Mirae is going to do soppy rubbish like this, bring back Truedy. Confucious says “one shitty ballad is worth a thousand blackfaces”.

Eddy Kim ft. Beenzino – Paldangdam

Korean TV didn’t want to broadcast this because of the (supposed) swearing, but I won’t broadcast it just because it sucks, which is a much better reason. Also, it sounds like Jamiroquai who is the worst musician in the world ever.

6 thoughts on “Kpopalypse roundup – new k-pop releases 29/2/2016”

Brand New Days is a lot better than everything the group released since NoNoNo. I guess because Japan doesn’t have the same shitty waste of oxygen netizens Korea does, Apink decides they don’t deserve the full brunt of their shitty music

I just have too many problems with Cosmic Girls. I kind of like Bloomy though. Although they really aren’t anything new or different. Sigh. Have reached that point where absolutely everything is a recycle?

I want to like the CLC song, but I’m too distracted by the fact that I can figure out where a lot of it is from (saw the Sunset Blvd and the Basic Just Won’t Do It shirts at Forever 21 the other day, and the tennis skirt and that one shiny skirt at American Apparel). They all look like I dressed them.

I can definitely agree that I wish Mamamoo would return to their jazzy, Piano Man style.. but alas, they are trying to appeal to a larger audience. Which is unfortunate, but I guess something you have to resort to unless you want to forever be a nugu and being a nugu doesn’t rake in the money. I’m still hoping they make another good bop like Piano Man in the future though.

Interestingly enough you mention Sistar, as one of the composers/producers of the song was one who made Shake It and whatever other songs they had. So hence, the influence. You probably already knew that though.

Actually believe it or not I rarely keep track of who writes what song!

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A blog created by me so I can write about k-pop related stuff. Some content is related to the k-pop radio show that I host, but most of it is just random shit that I felt like writing. All of it is primarily for my own personal amusement, although if you like it too, that’s fantastic and I love you. Warning: certain posts might occasionally be considered offensive, so if you are an easily offended fucking cunt maybe go read something else instead, thanks. – KPOPALYPSE