Bruno, the LA Watchdog: Love and Excess in High Places

If you’re a city official looking for a place to fall in — or out — of love, you might want to pick someplace other than Osteria Mozza.And don’t think you can compromise by patronizing the Pizzeria Mozza next door either.

How do say sieve in Italian? And I’m not talking about the kitchen utensil. The waiters seem to have a hotline to reporters and the place is usually surrounded by paparazzi, which is definitely Italian for something too vile for even this dog.

It’s hard for a dog like me to believe, but I’m told by a very reliable source, who’s actually been to Italy, that the best dish at Osteria Mozza is the grilled octopus appetizer. I’m not sure what octopus tastes like (remember, I’m a dog!), but seems to make some men behave like Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi.

The mayor is a regular at Mozza, whic is not far from the Hancock Park mansion where he lives. He’s been there many times with his pals and his girlfriend, former Miss USA and TV reporter Lu Parker. I’m sure a classy couple like them must like the octopus as they run up those big tabs he signs for.

Just this week, the LA Weekly’s Jill Stewart reported our soon to be former Police Chief Bill Bratton had an emotional dinner with his wife Rikki Kleiman that left her in tears, and so upset her that she had to be escorted out by one of his aides. (Always good to have an armed aide around if you’re going to upset your wife.)

But the hottest rumors this week surround Andrew Adelman, our chief of Building and Safety, who has hired big time lawyer Mark Geragos to help him deal with the investigation of sexual impropriety, to put to mildly.

Every dog in town seems to be barking about Adelman’s dating practices.
One says he heard that the cops leaked the story to provide a
distraction for whatever Bratton was telling his wife over their pasta.

And a doozy appeared this morning on the Mayor Sam blog -
attributed to of all people CD2 candidate and all around rumor monger
Zuma Dogg. The post, with the catchy headline of “Billboards and Rape,”
(Mayor Sam is not exactly the New York Times) reports that Adelman, who
is getting paid for not working while the cops investigate, got in this
mess because he was about to go after illegal billboards. Illegal
billboards?

Adelman apparently steered cleared of Mozza and
did his alleged partying in sleepy old downtown. It remains to be seen
whether he should have skipped those nightspots and headed to Mozza for
the octopus.

Maybe all the other politicians in the joint would have kept him out of trouble.

9 Responses to Bruno, the LA Watchdog: Love and Excess in High Places

Hey Pal,
Wife leaves restaurant in tears. The woof around the water bowl is Bratton told wifey one of the hundred way to dump a lover.
As for the tears…they were tears of joy because she’s getting a big fat settlement and won’t have to look at that bowwow of a face again.
Your friend,
G

Ron,
Shame on you for hitting a new low with Jill Stewart on this b.s. Can anyone blame the LA Times for her crapy journalism hit piece. I expect this crap from a pathetic woman but from a man, c’mon Ron grow up and be a MAN. There could be a number of reasons Rikki who I think is a wonderful person would be crying. I wonder how you would feel Ron if someone wrote this about your mother, your sister or friend? The fact that you are even giving this attention goes to the heart of how you were raised to take advantage of another person’s incident and make light of it. Pretty slimy if you ask me and a lot of people in this town think that way these days.

Actually, I think if you choose to be a television personality and actress AND you’re married to the chief of police in both the first and second largest city in the United States, that pretty much makes you a target for reporters.
What exactly did Ron do except for write something that other blogs are also writing about?
How exactly does this make him less of a man?

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