Warning: The following post contains sweeping generalisations and obviousy does not apply to your child who was never told the Santa lie, or who worked it out as they came out of the womb and refused to play along ever since.

Kids should be told before they go to high school. Although in reality I think very few kids truly believe past 8 it's better to err on the side of caution as far as mentioning Santa.

I don't think anyone is ever too old to ask what Santa brought them. It's only a small age range that will roll their eyes at you as though you're a moron. Younger kids believe, older teens and adults are cool with the joke. It's just the 10-15 age range that's too surly to play along.

I think I found out around 8ish. Possibly younger. I was so crushed. I didn't worry (or even think) about being "lied" to, I was just crushed that the magic was over :-(

My son is 6.5 years old and some kids in his Year 1 class are already mentioning that Santa isn't real etc. When he asks me about it I tend to say things like "aww that's a shame" and not really answer it properly. I know I'm avoiding the inevitable but he's still young enough to not be convinced by the other children about it. When he's more foreful about it with me I'll be honest.

Never too old 'for' Santa, I see this differently to figuring it all out, which in most cases happens during the Primary School years and the tooth fairy will stop coming in this house once all teeth have fallen out.

Interesting question OP because this has been going on in my mind for a while now. My 11 year old came to me a while ago and said she knew all those things weren't real, but thanked me for making it all so magical for her , but my 9 year old I know doesn't believe but really plays it up, to the point where it actually annoys me, because I know she doesn't believe, but tries so hard to convince me that she does. I don't know but for some reason I feel like saying to her "ohhh come on you can stop with the antics, we all know he's not real" , my 7 year old I think is in between and my 5 and 6 year old still believe.

I love Christmas and everything about Christmas and I never thought I would say this, but it will be so much easier when they all don't believe.

I think I was in about year 3 or 4 when I found out.....my cousin and I sat up really late, hiding in the loungeroom, eating a tube of colgates gel toothpaste. Saw the folks doing their thing...they were quite.....drunk. It was pretty funny.

I was not upset. My DD is 9 just before christmas. I think she may know, but hasn't said anything.

Please ensure that your kids know by high school. Teachers will assume they know. I do know one girl that found out this way in Year 9 (yes, she believed all that time!) and it was extremely traumatic and embarrassing for that to happen.

I don't see it as a cut and dry time frame, each child is different.Children will learn in the own time, we do not have to sit them down and tell them that there is no tooth fairy, santa or Easter Bunny. Unless some loudmouth tells them before they are ready to find out then it is a natural progression and for sometime they will 'play along' with you and keep up the fantasy for younger children.

The notion that any NT child will believe in any of the above when they go into secondary college because we haven't sat them down to tell them is not worth worrying about...it won't ever happen.

I don't recall ever being told Santa wasn't real, I just figured it out at some point. I still get a stocking from Santa every year at my parents' house, and I love it.

Same, except mum slips a few things to DH for my stocking now. BIL is single and will be coming to our house for Christmas Eve to get his stocking.

Tooth fairy will come until all baby teeth are gone, and for any extractions if they are required for reasons other than bad teeth (I had 2 teeth taken out when I was 16 to make some space and the tooth fairy came to me then).

Never too old but most of mine have started questioning around 10 or 11. Usually when school friends started saying it.I have never come out and told them and I wont. My dd is 12 and I know she knows, she asked some questions a year or so ago and I just said if you believe then it's real, if you stop believing then maybe they stop coming. We have younger ones so she is happy to play along for the and it means she keeps getting pressies lol

My Nana told me when I was about 11 and I totally still believed, I remember being really upset.

You're never too old. I have no intention of ever telling my kids that Santa doesn't exist. All kids eventually come to the realisation themselves.

I agree, it's all a bit of fun and with all the other christmas traditions we have in our house I can't imagine the realisation will be earth shattering.

For the record, I am 40 and we still get a gift under the tree from Santa, that is one of our traditions. It's also not unusual for me to ask girlfriends or for them to say to me "what did Santy bring you?"

It's no big deal, "Santa" doesn't have to stop just because you've worked out he doesn't exist, it's just one part of the romance of christmas.

I do know one girl that found out this way in Year 9 (yes, she believed all that time!) and it was extremely traumatic and embarrassing for that to happen.

I honestly do not understand how this can happen to an NT child. I really don't know it can happen to any child once they hit secondary college where 99.99% of the children know the reality as opposed to being in a primary school where a greater percentage of children actually do still believe.

With this topic I always think of the last line in the book 'The Water Babies' where he says "But remember always, as I told you at first, that this is all a fairy tale, and only fun and pretence: and, therefore, you are not to believe a word of it, even if it is true."

I think that's a good way to deal with Santa - to keep the magic alive that it might, maybe be true, but isn't really. You can carry that sense of 'maybe' right through with you into adulthood. It seems like a much better way of doing it than insisting it's true for years and then having to break the news at some point, or having it broken for you. Some kids seem to get a bit upset about that. Not that it's a big deal at all, but I get that there's a desire in kids to believe in magic and fairies and I don't think it's necessary to quash that, while still letting them know the truth.

With this topic I always think of the last line in the book 'The Water Babies' where he says "But remember always, as I told you at first, that this is all a fairy tale, and only fun and pretence: and, therefore, you are not to believe a word of it, even if it is true."

I think that's a good way to deal with Santa - to keep the magic alive that it might, maybe be true, but isn't really. You can carry that sense of 'maybe' right through with you into adulthood. It seems like a much better way of doing it than insisting it's true for years and then having to break the news at some point, or having it broken for you. Some kids seem to get a bit upset about that. Not that it's a big deal at all, but I get that there's a desire in kids to believe in magic and fairies and I don't think it's necessary to quash that, while still letting them know the truth.

I probably wouldn't want them going to high school still believing but when my 6 year old came home from school telling me kids in his class told him Santa is just a guy playing dress up I was really disappointed.He still believes though thankfully, I asked him why they said that and he told me because they are all liars and was so excited to see Santa at the pageant on the weekend

I have no idea of when I learnt the 'truth', I definately wasn't sat down and told. Santa always came at our house, and still comes to DH and I now. I have no intention of telling my kids that Santa isnt real. Kids work this out for themselves in their own time, and like most things in childhood children will do it in their own time when their ready. At Christmas we make a point of the kids putting a gift under the KMart Wishing Tree and talking about the birth of Christ and the meaning of Christmas, getting together and spending time with family. Santa is just one part of Christmas and the traditions we have, but he is an important part. And my kids can believe for as long as they wish, if they ask if Santa is real, my response will be to ask them what they think.

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