Thursday, January 27, 2005

The Sand Keeps Trickling

He sat there, looking at the streetlight. It was 3AM. What was he doing there, he thought all of a sudden. He'd been there for over an hour now, just sitting there and thinking. Not good. Walked up to his room. Tried to lie down....no, not right, couldn't breathe. The chest pain was worse than it had been all day. Somehow, lying down wasn't an option. Wasn't able to breathe when flat on the back. It was almost as if there was something stopping his chest from expanding....

His mind wandered back to the same thoughts again. Damn! This wasn't really helping either. Opened the pack, there was just one left. Whoops! He'd just bought it at 9 the night before.....19 gone since then?Again, not a good sign...that made it 39 for the day...and this would be 40.....got to stop. Lit up and started writing.....

Where do you look
When all the right answers are wrong?
Do you look at the emptiness and see,
The darkness all around the light,
The beacon still shines,
But the glamour is all gone,
The lights that once shone on you,
Now all seem so forlorn

Why try when all you seek is gone?
The road ahead seems short,
The distance too far to walk,
In this eternity we struggle on,
My solitude urging me forward,
The togetherness holding me back,
We looked back and counted,
All of us so alone

I used to be another person,
But that was another world,
I made-believe I could live forever,
In the moment that stood so still,
Life passed me by,
And left me too far behind,
What was so beautiful to blind eyes,
Unseen, says what I deny

And maybe life would be easy,
If I too could not see,
Or maybe if I lived right,
I too might be able to perceive,
But drifting on these seas,
I’ve ventured out too far,
The shore’s far off, the boat’s gone,
Now the only way is down