Why Do I Feel So Alone?

15th February 2017

Sending a smiley face doesn’t say it at all.

Why, if there are 7 billion people on Earth, do I feel so alone? This is what Ruby Wax asks in her book A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled. The author, comedian and TV writer talks of the horrible realisation that she hasn’t spoken with her ‘mouth or seen the flesh of a real friend for twelve years.’

I do so much with my fingers to keep in touch with people that I’ve forgotten that what I need to do is get up and go somewhere to meet them.

— Ruby Wax

Another thing she can no longer remember to do is how to say ‘I miss you’. Emoticons are her go-to tool for expression and everyone from her husband to her bank manager and her plumber get a similar digital sign-off. And yet all this interconnectedness doesn’t help. Despite all the methods of communication available to us today, many people still feel lonely (at times, or all the time). Because the less we feel the need to emotionally connect with each other, the more our ability to [diminishes].

You can spend the rest of your life online but it will never make you feel the same as when someone covered in skin smiles at you. We might just have lost that human touch of togetherness because sending a smiley face doesn’t say it at all.

— Ruby Wax

REFLECTIONS

When did you last meet that friend or relative in real life?

Will you choose to articulate your feelings instead of selecting that pumping heart emoji? Is it difficult or easy? What impact does it have on you?