Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the number-one best-selling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood.

Uganda Be Kidding Me

Wherever Chelsea Handler travels, one thing is certain: she always ends up in the land of the ridiculous. Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever.

The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo

In The Girl With the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy shares stories about her family, her relationships, her career, good - and bad - sex, recounting the experiences that have shaped who she is today: from the riches to rags story of her childhood to her teenage quest for popularity (and boys) to becoming one of the most sought-after comedians on the planet and an outspoken advocate for women's rights.

Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness", the condition people suffer from that allows them to fall prey to her brand of complete and utter nonsense. Friends, family, co-workers - they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.

Suck Less: Where There's a Willam, There's a Way

The only lie told more often than "no, that looks totally cute on you" and "I got AIDS through oral" is "it gets better". Well, a lotta times it don't. Sometimes it just sucks less. But I promise you: Where there's a Willam, there's a way. But this isn't all about me (for once). It's about you and how you can suck less at a variety of things drag queens are so much better at than the average person.

The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**k

A brilliant, hilarious homage to The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, showing how to shed your mental clutter for good. Aimed at overachieving but dissatisfied people everywhere. Sarah's inspirational two-step 'NotSorry' program shows how unleashing the power of not giving a f**k will help you shed unwanted guilt and obligations to redirect time, energy and enthusiasm to your true priorities.

Lessons I've Learned

In this long-awaited audiobook, Davina McCall shares the tips and wisdoms learned on her 'work-in-progress' journey through life. Warm, engaging, honest and generous, this audiobook will make you laugh and cry in equal measure. Lessons I've Learned is the closest thing to a Davina hug and we all need one of those....

Alanatomy: The Inside Story

In his first novel, Look Who It Is!, Alan told his story ('oh and what a life') with his unique twist of natural, observational and tongue-in-cheek humour that made him famous. Alan Carr described his life story in his own words, from growing up in a football-mad family in Northampton to his rise as one of Britain's best-loved comedians. And now he is ready to divulge the next chapter in bursts of hilarious Technicolor.

D Coleman says:"Brilliant second book, full of the stuff we want to hear about."

Why Not Me?

Mindy Kaling has found herself at a turning point. So in Why Not Me?, she shares her ongoing journey to find fulfilment and adventure in her adult life, be it falling in love at work, seeking new friendships in unlikely places, or attempting to be the first person in history to lose weight without any behaviour modification whatsoever. In 'How to Look Spectacular', she reveals her tongue-in-cheek solutions for guaranteed on-camera beauty.

Bonkers: My Life in Laughs

Jennifer Saunders' comic creations have brought joy to millions. From Comic Strip to Comic Relief, from Bolly-swilling Edina in Ab Fab to her takes on Madonna or Mamma Mia, her characters are household names. But it's Jennifer herself who has a place in all our hearts. This is her funny, moving, and frankly bonkers memoir, filled with laughter, friends, and occasional heartache - but never misery. Bonkers is full of riotous adventures.

Peggy and Me

The hilarious and heartwarming account of Miranda and her life changing dog, the inimitable and most lovable Peggy. Hello dear audiobook browser and welcome to Peggy and Me. The story of my life since getting a beautiful Shih-Tzu Bichon Frise cross puppy (I call the breed a Shitty Frise - fun) in the form of Peggy.

Yes Please

In Amy Poehler's highly anticipated first book, Yes Please, she offers up a big juicy stew of personal stories, funny bits on sex and love and friendship and parenthood and real life advice (some useful, some not so much).Powered by Amy's charming and hilarious, biting yet wise voice, and including a star-studded guest list of vocal appearances.

A Life in Parts

Bryan Cranston landed his first role at seven, when his father, a struggling actor and director, cast him in a commercial. Soon Bryan was haunting the local movie theater, reenacting scenes with his older brother. Acting was clearly his destiny - until one day his father disappeared. As a young man on a classic cross-country motorcycle trip, he found himself stranded at a rest area in the Blue Ridge Mountains. To pass the time, he read a tattered copy of Hedda Gabler, and in a flash he found himself face-to-face with his original calling.

Wuthering Heights

The passionate and tragic story of Catherine Earnshaw and Heathcliff is one of the high points of nineteenth-century Romantic literature. In the relationship of Cathy and Heathcliff, and in the wild, bleak Yorkshire Moors of its setting, Wuthering Heights creates a world of its own, conceived with a disregard for convention and an instinct for poetry and the darkest depths of the human soul in torment.

Bossypants

Once in a generation a woman comes along who changes everything. Tina Fey is not that woman, but she met that woman once and acted weird around her.

Before 30 Rock, Mean Girls, and 'Sarah Palin', Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV. She has seen both these dreams come true.

Animal: The Autobiography of a Female Body

Take a funny and illuminating tour of the female body with award-winning comedian Sara Pascoe. Women have so much going on, what with boobs and jealousy and menstruating and broodiness and sex and infidelity and pubes and wombs and jobs and memories and emotions and the past and the future and themselves and each other. Here's a book that deals with all of it. Sara Pascoe has joked about femininity and sexuality on stage and screen, but now she has a book to talk about it all for a bit longer.

What I Know for Sure

The inspirational wisdom of Oprah Winfrey, collected for the first time in a beautiful book. After film critic Gene Siskel asked her, 'What do you know for sure?' Oprah Winfrey began writing the 'What I Know For Sure' column in O, The Oprah Magazine. Saying that the question offered her a way to take 'stock of her life', Oprah has penned one column a month over the last 14 years.

Reasons to Stay Alive

What Does it mean to feel truly alive? Aged 24, Matt Haig's world caved in. He could see no way to go on living. This is the true story of how he came through crisis, triumphed over an illness that almost destroyed him and learned to live again. A moving, funny and joyous exploration of how to live better, love better and feel more alive, Reasons to Stay Alive is more than a memoir. It is a book about making the most of your time on earth.

Self-Inflicted Wounds: Heartwarming Tales of Epic Humiliation

Aisha Tyler, comedian, actress, cohost of CBS's The Talk, star of Archer, and creator of the top-ranked podcast Girl on Guy, serves up a spectacular collection of her own self-inflicted wounds. From almost setting herself on fire, to vomiting on a boy she liked, to getting drunk and sleeping through the SATs, to going into crushing debt to pay for college and then throwing away her degree to become a comedian, Aisha's life has been a series of spectacularly epic fails. And she's got the scars to prove it. Literally.

Spectacles

Penguin presents the unabridged, downloadable audiobook edition of Spectacles, the hilarious, creative and incredibly moving memoir from much loved comedian, writer and presenter Sue Perkins. When I began writing this book, I went home to see if my mum had kept some of my stuff. What I found was that she hadn't kept some of it. She had kept all of it - every bus ticket, postcard, school report....

Nineteen Eighty-Four

Big Brother is watching you.... 1984 is the year in which it happens. The world is divided into three superstates. In Oceania, the Party's power is absolute. Every action, word, gesture and thought is monitored under the watchful eye of Big Brother and the Thought Police. In the Ministry of Truth, the Party's department for propaganda, Winston Smith's job is to edit the past. Over time, the impulse to escape the machine and live independently takes hold of him and he embarks on a secret and forbidden love affair.

Girl Walks into a Bar...: Comedy Calamities, Dating Disasters, and a Midlife Miracle

Anyone who saw an episode of Saturday Night Live between 1999 and 2006 knows Rachel Dratch. She was hilarious! So what happened to her? After a misbegotten part as Jenna on the pilot of 30 Rock, Dratch was only getting offered roles as "Lesbians. Secretaries. Sometimes secretaries who are lesbians." Her career at a low point, Dratch suddenly had time for yoga, dog- sitting, learning Spanish - and dating. After all, what did a forty-something single woman living in New York have to lose?

The Girl with All the Gifts

Melanie is a very special girl. Dr Caldwell calls her 'our little genius'. Every morning, Melanie waits in her cell to be collected for class. When they come for her, Sergeant keeps his gun pointing at her while two of his people strap her into the wheelchair. She thinks they don't like her. She jokes that she won't bite, but they don't laugh. Melanie loves school. She loves learning about spelling and sums and the world outside the classroom and the children's cells.

Thinking, Fast and Slow

Daniel Kahneman, recipient of the Nobel Prize in Economic Sciences for his seminal work in psychology challenging the rational model of judgment and decision making, is one of the world's most important thinkers. His ideas have had a profound impact on many fields - including business, medicine, and politics - but until now, he has never brought together his many years of research in one book.

Publisher's Summary

You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.

I've been a huge fan of Chelsea Handler for a while, and was so excited to read this book. It really doesn't disappoint. One of those books you can read over and over again and still enjoy as much as you did the first time.

As the host of one America's favourite late night chat shows, Chelsea Handler is known for her quick wit and sharp comments. This book contains many embarrassing and cringe worthy stories told through handler's trademark wit.

Wow, what a witty and quick book this was! I found myself laughing so hard cappucino nearly came out my nose, as I listened and drove one night. Very, very funny book. Be prepared for straight talk about sex and a new interpretation of your sexuality.
I thoroughly enjoyed this book!

14 of 15 people found this review helpful

Lezlee

Omaha, NE, USA

05/07/10

Overall

"My Horizontal Life"

Although not narrated by Chelsea herself, this book is witty and raunchy all at once! This book does not disapoint.

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

Trish

15/04/10

Overall

"Love this book"

I am a huge fan love her humor. Found myself laughing out loud. The only disappointment was Chelsea did not narrate.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

Erica

Cookeville, TN, USA

04/12/09

Overall

"Loved It"

I have listened to this book at least ten times and it is funnier every time. My only disappointment was that the book was narrated by someone other than Chelsea Handler. Her inflection and dramatic pauses make her even funnier (in my opinion) and I would have LOVED for her to read this one to me! The narrator did do a fabulous job, however! After a few minutes, I forgot it wasn't Chelsea. It would make a great gift for any Chelsea fan (or anyone who likes comedy).

7 of 8 people found this review helpful

Felicia

The Colony, TX, United States

30/07/10

Overall

"Fun Time!"

What I Loved: Chelsea is so very Chelsea in this book. She gets herself into the most unique situations and always seems to keep a sense of humor about herself. She manages to make even the most uncomfortable situation funny.

What I Liked: She never names people--she gives them cute little nicknames. I also like the chronological order of things, her situations change as she gets older and she doesn't try to make herself look like a saint.

What was So-So: Not a darn thing! I listened to this on audio book and found myself laughing out loud often.

Why I gave it a 4: I love reading auto-biographies that are interesting and fun. Chelsea managed to keep a sense of humor about her life and relay that to the reader/listener.

Book Received From: Purchased on Audible

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Hakes

Wilkes Barre, PA, United States

02/08/09

Overall

"Sick and Amusing"

Chelsea Handler is not for everyone, but if you can get past her uninhibited frankness her books are hilarious. This narrator sounds very much like Ms Handler, and had no problem at all conveying her dry humor. For me, this fell into the category of light listening. It wouldn't have held my interest on a long drive, but it was perfect to listen to while painting the bedroom. I recommend listening with earbuds...you don't want kids (or your 80 year old mother) to hear this!

5 of 6 people found this review helpful

Amazon Customer

19/05/10

Overall

"SO Funny!"

So funny!!
She is out of control!! SO funny hearing her crazy stories! =-)

3 of 4 people found this review helpful

amy

platte city, MO, United States

19/08/09

Overall

"Maybe?"

I read this book last year, and I enjoyed the book so much that I bought the audio book to listen to as I run (I enjoy comedy when running).

Why didn't Chelsea Handler narrate this? She narrated her last book, and it was GREAT GREAT GREAT. The narrator was reading a story to me, and it felt like that. Like I was just being read to; Chelsea was so good in her last audio book I felt like she was telling me a story.

The book is the same, but I think I would have enjoyed this more with Chelsea Handler. Even the sarcasm and some of the jokes didn't come through.

5 of 7 people found this review helpful

Kelly

hammond, IN, USA

16/08/09

Overall

"It is worth the money"

Chelsea Handler made me laugh from beginning to end. The book was very funny

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

Renee

Towson, MD, United States

18/06/09

Overall

"Great Listen!"

Very funny story.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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