You were FAR kinder then I would have been my Mother in Law and Sister in Law are very fearful of dogs too but they don't attack (which is exactly what this girl did) any strange that comes up to them. If she would have calmed down and apologized to YOU (imo you owe them nothing you did nothing wrong) I would have calmly explained a better way to react that wouldn't put her in danger. But she and certainly her mother are old enough to not behave in the manner they did after she stopped freaking out and you said what you did. I would have less then politely excused them from MY property.