My REView of the REV 1000

A couple of months ago, in a restaurant in Kensington, I was handed the lofty task of becoming the first man in the world to conduct a review of a ‘revolutionary’ new male sex toy… the REV 1000.

I was slightly alarmed when the box was handed to me publicly over the table but as I started to sweat a little and look over my shoulder for any curious waitresses my mind was soon put to rest when I saw the unassuming, stylish packaging. There was no sign of naked women or explicit images, the REV 1000 box bore more of a resemblance to a shaver or aftershave gift set than something that housed a sex toy.

As my supplier filled me in to the initial concept of the REV 1000, the way it looks, works and the fact that it had been produced with the intention of ‘REVolutionising’ the world of the male sex toy, I was overcome with curiosity. With regards to breaking the taboo of men using sex toys, I had to admit it had already changed my mind and was already keen to try it out.

The second I got home – I opened up the box and gave the contents the once over (no, I didn’t use it for a wank straight away). The thing about the Rev 1000 is you really feel like you’re getting a quality product and it makes you want to inspect every part of what’s inside. I read the instructions and examined the product and it accessories. As well as the product and charger it comes with an extra internal sleeve, a sachet of lube and a multi country adaptor so you can take it on your travels.

The REV 1000 is rechargeable and although pre charged, it says you should charge it for the first time for 8 hours to prolong the battery life. I’m embarrassed to say due to anticipation – I didn’t do this… The good news is though, that after the initial charge, you only have to charge for an hour each time to give you a full hour of use.

The actual masturbator has a joystick-esque handle with a control unit within making it really easy to control. In the centre is smoked plastic which gives you a view of the soft stimulation sleeve inside and at the end is a screw lid. Motivated by my curiosity, I have to admit I couldn’t wait to get this off and get started.

Having tested out several sex toys in the past I wasn’t shy about giving it a whirl and once securely fastened into the REV1000’s chamber (which doesn’t take much, just get an erection, apply a bit of the lube included and you’re laughing). There are 7 speeds and 7 functions, so a good old bit of mathematics will tell you that’s 49 combinations in total. I tried all the functions knowing there would be one I liked more than others and it didn’t take long before I realised function 7 was my favourite. In a nutshell, the functions are akin to a blowjob where the woman swivels her hands around your shaft… though the sensation is very different and of course, a lot more precise/controllable. Some of the functions give very small, sharp movements from side-to-side, while others swivel around in far longer, sweeping rotations and some lay in the middle with a more definite and powerful swing. Once I’d identified the one I liked I then altered the speed according to how I liked it. The sensation produced by the side-to-side movement and the stimulation of the soft nodules inside the sleeve is pretty intense. They stroke and grip your penis in a way you’ll definitely have never experienced before. It’s actually a seriously good feeling and definitely on a par with a very, very good blowjob or perhaps even better. As you feel yourself nearing climax, the likelihood is that you’ll want to increase the speed – this is very easy to do, even when you’re losing your mind on the verge of an intense orgasm. Honestly, it’s an unbelievable feeling as the chamber swivels round and round taking you closer and closer to ecstasy. In fact, my first go left me a dribbling wreck within a surprisingly short amount of time.

The more you use the REV1000 the more you’ll experiment with the different functions and speeds and find that, as well as the swivelling movement you can also use it in a similar way to other masturbators, moving the device up and down your shaft in synch with the swivel motion.

Once you’re done the REV1000 is really easy to clean. You simply unscrew the handle from the main unit and lift out the inner cradle which is held in place by a magnet and clean the sleeve with warm water or sex toy cleaner.

Sextoys.co.uk are touting the REV1000 as a groundbreaking masturbator and, two months down the line (still having intense experiences with it), I have little doubt that it will have a huge impact on the men’s sex toy market. It looks good, which is very important, it has that gadget-esque quality to it and, most importantly, it does a perfect job of providing pleasure.

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