It's just been reported that one of the French football players has failed a drugs and alcohol test the on Monday after the match. If this is confirmed as positive, under World Football Federation rules, paragraph 6 sub section 2e, France will forfeit their 3 points and they'll be appointed to their opponents, England.

See below for the full transcript of this report.

Carlsberg don't send email, but if they did, they'd probably be the best emails in the world.

Scotland placed on a major flood alert. All areas of Scotland were last night placed on high alert as a major flood is expected this morning. This is thought to have been caused by most of Scotland pishing themselves laughing at the England result.