Stories

When I saw the video above I was reminded of a sweet story about a girl who got to meet her #1...

About ten years ago my friend Holly called me in a massive state of excitment. I could barely understand her. After about 15 minutes of hysteria, she finally got it out. She had heard Christopher Walken on the radio offering off a chance to meet him that night. She immediately pulled over and called in as he had been her #1 for years. She got through and even got to speak to Walken on the phone. By the time she won the the chance to meet him as well as tickets {to Hilarities}, she was a blubbering (but very very ecstatic) mess. Our phone call was not pretty but I managed to figure out the gist of it.

She had won 8 tickets to Hilarities (warning warning warning) and Christopher Walken was going to be there to meet her and her friends. At 20, Christopher Walken seems an odd choice for a celebrity crush, but we (our group) as a whole had never really fit in the normal category. We got dolled up and drove downtown. We arrived, looking mighty spiffy and were immediately shown to our front row seats. The show was about to start and we still had no idea how or when we were going to meet Walken. My girl Holly went up to ask and came back with no answer. She said the manager had looked confused when she asked (warning warning warning). She sat back down as the show started. The comedian was from the Howard Stern Show. He started off as expected, sexist with a hint of funny and as the drinks became more and more abundant, he got WAY funnier. Just as we all were starting to think that this guy was the funniest man we had ever heard, Walken's voice bounced around the room. Our eyes went to center stage. No Walken. We heard him again, this time our eyes telling our brain (very very slowly) that Walken's voice had come out of the comedian's mouth. Sparks flashed, light bulbs went off, and Holly looked like she was about to bolt.

It had all been a ruse. By the radio station. My girl hadn't spoken to Christopher Walken that morning, she had spoken to this comedian while he was doing an impression of the man. And she fell for it. We all fell for it. We were now the butt of a joke. HI-freaking-LARIOUS. The comedian zoomed in on our table of ladies and went for the jugular. Thank god I had already downed my minimum of three dirty martini's or I bet I would remember this story a lot differently.

By the end of the show, our faces were red from embarassment and our bodies were tipsy drunk from vodka. We would never be able to go back there. And then...SWEET REDEMPTION! Christopher Walken The douche comedian came by as we were leaving to apologize for the ruse. He then went on to buy us drinks (we were all underage) and invited us to party with him back at his hotel. He was at least 45. We were not. We took the drinks and ran. Classy bitch that guy was. Classy bitch.