Tamil Nadu to make Rajinikanth Statue

Building statues seem to be the flavour of the season with every state competing with the other in spending public money on building bigger and bigger statues. This week Maha’s CM said, with an indirect reference to NaMo, “Mine is bigger than yours!”. He later clarified that this was only with respect to the proposed Sardar Patel statue which NaMo was building in Gujarat. Madam Maya later issued a statement that she should take credit for all this spending as it was her mammoth project in UP which kicked off the construction frenzy.

While all this spending was happening in the North, the South was in slumber. After the announcement of the Shivaji statue, they woke up suddenly and today, they announced their grand plan and yes, it will be bigger. In a rare display of Unity AIADMK, DMK, MDMK and all other parties whose names match with the regex (.*)MK came together today at Marina beach and laid the foundation stone for TN’s statue. A spokesperson said,

In the North, they are building statues of people and kings, we will build a statue of GOD. And this GOD, for all of us from Tamil Nadu, is none other than Rajinikanth! Everyone from here, be it from FC, BC, SC, OBC or even BBC regard Rajinikanth as their GOD and it is only fitting that we make his statue as the biggest one in not only India, but also the world.

The main political parties in the south said that they have decades of experience in spending public money. The ping-pong between them when one starts a mega-project and the other party kills it on getting elected has given them immense experience in squandering tax payer’s money.

Details of the statue:

The statue would be taller than the proposed ones in Mumbai and Gujarat, obviously.

To be prepared for the eventuality that Andhra will build a bigger statue of NT Rama Rao, the statue designers have put in an innovative feature. Rajini can lift his heel higher and higher so as to always compete with higher statues

All flights coming in from the North , before landing at Chennai Airport, have to go around the statue in a clockwise direction, thus performing a pradakshina of the GOD and paying their obeisance to HIM.

Every year, on the birthday of GOD, all politicians will rent helicopters and land on the helipad built on HIS palm. From there, it will be easy to garland HIM. This will also give the politicians the opportunity to raise tenders for few crores for the huge garlands.

The body colour of GOD is pending payment of few thousand crores from Fair & Lovely, as this can impact the sales of their product in Tamil Nadu in a big way.

The GOD himself declined to comment while his secretary said, “GOD never asks for anything. HE only gets what the people want to give HIM!”