Does Size Matter?

Many American men are hopelessly preoccupied with penis size. We invest so much of our psychic energy in a part of our body that rarely sees the light of day. (Unless, of course, you're an erotic entertainer or a commercial sex worker.)

"Businesspeople" have realized that many men hang their insecurities on penis size, and these opportunists do their best to exploit such insecurities for a quick buck, or, more accurately, millions in consistent revenue streams. Even the most reputable publications, like the Los Angeles Times, run seedy advertisements soliciting readers to plunk down thousands on penis enlargement surgery (phalloplasty if you want to get specific). Such enlargement surgeries are not only questionably effective but can be dangerous. Furthermore, large penises are nearly ubiquitous in the world of porn.

According to two studies, men who either self-stimulated or took medication (like Viagra or Cialis) to become erect, had an average penis size of 5.3 inches. (In studies where men self-reported penis size, average penis size was longer at 6 inches.) Other researchers found that men who were taller and thinner had longer penises than men who were shorter and heavier.

In 2006, researchers at UCLA published a paper titled "Does Size Matter? Men's and Women's Views on Penis Size Across the Lifespan." To its credit, their study is the first large-scale (no pun intended) research endeavor to examine the "association among men's self-reported penis size, penis size satisfaction, personal characteristics and body image."

Here are some results from the 2006 study:

• 66% of men in the study thought their penis size was "average." One in 10 men thought their penis was "small."• 85% of women surveyed said their partner's penis size was "average" or "large" and were satisfied with its length. Of the 15% who said that their partner's penis was small, the vast majority wished their partner had a larger penis.• 45% of the men surveyed wished they had a larger penis. To put this percentage in perspective, 38% of men surveyed were dissatisfied with their height, and 41% surveyed were dissatisfied with their weight.• Of the men who were dissatisfied with their penis length, most of these men were dissatisfied with their bodies and faces, too. Additionally, most of these men felt uncomfortable exposing their bodies to sexual partners. These results suggest that these men's dissatisfaction with penis size is correlated with body image dissatisfaction. (Although correlation was statistically significant, causation wasn't proven. In other words, it's unclear whether men were dissatisfied with their body and face because they thought their penis was small or the converse.)• Dissatisfaction with penis size diminishes only slightly as men age.

It should be noted that although this study was admirable, it did have its limitations. Chief among them, penis size was self-reported and never measured, and it's a fact that many men misrepresent the size of their "little warriors." (For example, whenever anybody asks me how large my penis is, I ask them if they have a yardstick.) Other limitations include that this study only asked about the erect, not flaccid, penises and didn't ask about penis girth. (Some studies suggest that women are more concerned with girth than length--no doubt, good news for some men.)

I like this study because it suggests that men are much more concerned about their penis size than their women partners are. Most men have nothing to worry about. For most men, insecurity about penis size is imagined. Men (and fewer women) forget that it's not the size of the penis that's important, it's the heart and mind that's connected to the penis.

My personal research indicates that a woman's desire for a larger penis is contingent on two separate but related questions. The first deals with past experience: has she experienced pleasurable penetration from a larger penis than that of her last or current partner, in the past; what was the frequency of this experience and whether this/these occurrence(s) involved a live penis a dildo, or vibrator. The second question, closely tied and contingent on the first, is whether the partner with the large penis was skilled and understood the need for sensitivity, sensory stimulation and finesse prior to and during the first penetration of her vagina, which up to then, had never experienced a large penis.
Keep in mind, aesthetics play a big part in encouraging women to take the leap of faith, given that most girls get excited practicing oral sex on a penis, with a shaft they are able to grasp with one or even two hands while performing felatio(oral sex). However, I cannot overstate the importance of skill (which can be learned); for it is unequivocally the key factor in whether the girl finds pleasure in the subsequent intercourse.
Case in point: One numerous occasions I have made love to women who had never enjoyed intercourse with their previous partners (with regular size penises) for a wide spectrum of reasons. In turn, the thought of having my penis inside of them was something they understandably felt would be a horrific or painful experience. Yet, all of these skeptical women eventually came around to not only enjoy, but crave vaginal penetration from my penis. Although, I am a bit of a germ-phob and insist on safe sex (often to my chagrin in that the extra large condoms do not have the variety of sensitivity options, which are available with ordinary condoms) many times I’ve practiced anal intercourse with the same girls who never dreamed of actually enjoying my penis in their vagina. In fact, my current girl friend who is rather petite, told me she would never have anal sex with anyone-ESPECIALLY ME!-due to the fact that the one time she tried it with a boyfriend in college, she was in so much pain, afterwards, she went off campus to a hospital emergency room for care (which she says was the most humiliating act of her life). To add injury to insult, her boyfriend was Asian with a penis she estimates to have been 3 to 4 inches. The point of my story is that her boyfriend was either a selfish louse or a crude insensitive nitwit; for overtime not only did she enjoy anal sex with me, she often requested it when the conditions where suitable for the necessary cleanliness precautions.*For those interested the two most important elements (not exclusive) of Anal Sex are (1) water soluble lubrication and (2) continuous, slow, circular massaging of the anal cavity prior to insertion. The tangible benefit of anal sex is that once a woman has orgazmed as many time as feasibly possible (where to do it again, would take at least another hour and a bucket of perspiration) anal sex immediately following her last orgasm via vaginal stimulation, can provide her with another exceptionally spectacular vaginal orgasm through the anal canal.

To conclude, over my life I have shared closed relationships with numerous girls who have shared with me intimate details of their likes, dislikes and sexual proclivities. With confidence, I can say that the size on a guy’s penis is typically NOT the factor that matters. It's a shame that many guys, who are not overly endowed have been programmed to be insecure and less confident than they should be, when it reality they are not at a disadvantage with 95% of the world’s women. Furthermore, any shortcoming they are mentally burdened with is self inflicted; for women with all of their beauty, are welcoming to stimulation, to any man who is willing to accept and understand that her enjoyment is preeminent and must be achieved prior to his climax. Inexperienced teenage men believe the primary goal of sex is to orgasm, when in fact, the virtuous man knows: that it is crucial to first attend to the nuances of his partner and make certain she orgasms a minimum of once, before he even considers ejaculating. Adhering to this protocol will invariably result in far more pleasure for both parties, a much tighter bond, loyalty and passion which can never be attained employing the tired, selfish sex rituals of children.

I've been hearing about how men are supposely worried about their penis size since I was a kid. I think this is something the politically correct male bashing media likes to state as if it is fact. As a man in my forties I can tell you I've never once worried that my penis wasn't big enough. Never crossed my mind. On top of that I've never actually heard any man anywhere ever talk about this. I think this is an urban legend. But hey if it sells magazines I guess that's all that matters.

As a woman, I can tell you that it's true that penis size matters less to us than it does to men. Girth is an important factor, and it's better if a penis is a bit shorter but thicker than a long, skinny one...and a long thick one would be just plain intimidating.

Society is creating a generation of misandrist,penis-size obsessed,bash-a-man-on-a-whim-according-to-his-genitals-size,women with a princess mentality.Guess what you do NOT deserve anything ladies you have to earn what you get in life and this female,entitlement culture of measuring a dude's worth or whether he's suitable for you for dating/relationship based on his size or the size of his bank account must end.Stop throwing stones from glass houses gals...@ turn off the mind-rot pornography-- thx