Which must be why LA County, CA has passed a law mandating condoms for porn stars, and requiring a permit to film sex scenes.

Submitted: November 10, 2012

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Submitted: November 10, 2012

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Big Dick is a porn star.

You know how he got his nickname?

Well, his name is Richard. And he's un-small.

They also call him Thick Dick.

'Cause he ain't so bright.

Which must be why LA County, CA has passed a law mandating condoms for porn stars, and requiring a
permit to film sex scenes.

Obviously, the voters have determined that the porn industry can't take care of itself. Like everyone
else these days, these poor bastards are in for some Big Brother-ly oversight.

Which kind of makes sense. Who's got more experience screwing people than the
government?

I guess nothing's sacred anymore—not even dirty movies.

I'm sure (or rather, I hope) the law spells out clearly the difference between a porn shoot and a
regular … shoot. We don't need the condom constables knocking the bedroom door down and asking us for our permit.

"A permit? I barely even have consent, officer …"

"Hold your rubbers up where we can see them, hard-on!"

"What are you going to do, haul us away? We're already handcuffed."

"I guess we'll have to finish up in jail, honey. No, not with each other. Sorry."

But since the new rules are supposed to be in the interest of safety, we should probably embrace them.
Except that, once The Man starts regulating, he always ends up piling on more rules. So today, it's condoms and permits. Tomorrow, it'll be lots of other stuff.