Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Mission: Implausible

The blank stares of children, followed by the sadly rhetorical question, "What'd I do?" is one of those things that drives me buggy. These often occur while standing in the middle of a pile of debris or over another crying child. The oblivious state they assume is almost always more annoying than the actual infraction.That's why it was so nice to see that "the White House" has finally admitted fault on the "Mission: Accomplished" banner. President Pinhead "is well aware that the banner should have been much more specific and said `mission accomplished' for these sailors who are on this ship on their mission," White House press secretary Dana Perino said Wednesday. "And we have certainly paid a price for not being more specific on that banner. And I recognize that the media is going to play this up again tomorrow, as they do every single year."For those of you keeping score at home, it has been five years since ol' Pointy-Noggin told us, "Major combat operations in Iraq have ended." Five years and thousands of casualties later, we are still waiting for combat operations to cease. One might feel a trace of sympathy for Ms. Perino, who has the inglorious task of trailing after the parade of horses like Tony Snow and Ari Fleischer. As the Pinhead Regime winds down, she's got a lot of 'splainin' to do. Back in October 2003, Pinhead disavowed any connection with the "Mission Accomplished" message. He said the White House had nothing to do with the banner; a spokesman later said the ship's crew asked for the sign and the White House staff had it made by a private vendor.Five years ago, the President of the United States flew onto the deck of an aircraft carrier in a fighter jet, then stood in front of a thirty foot banner proclaiming: Mission: Accomplished. For five years he has stood there, with bodies piling up around his feet with that blank look on his face, saying, "What'd I do?"He lied.