Primal Journal? Challenge Accepted!

Hello folks. Unfortunately I don't have time for a full out post, but I'm making this journal to chronicle my Success Story in the Making adventure! :P I was a little opposed to the thought of journaling at first, but what the heck? I spend a crazy amount of time lurking around the forums anyway, haha.

Now to submit my goals and force myself to work on homework. Expect a proper (more interesting) post soon. Night!

I'm 20 years old, 5'8", ~168 lbs (I don't weigh myself very often). I started trying to lose weight last January the CW way via The South Beach Diet. It was a good place for me to start, I think; it got me eating more whole foods and less junk. Around June I discovered Mark's site and had my, "Aha!" moment. Been primal ever since. I lost a total of 50 lbs, one shirt size and 3-4 pant sizes over the past year. I don't have a goal weight in mind. The smallest I ever remember being is 155 and a size 10 back in my freshman year of high school. I have a feeling that I'll probably end up in the 140's somewhere... but it really depends on how I feel.

I'm not sure if I'm just weird, but the thought of losing another 20 lbs makes me nervous. For as long as I can remember I've been chubby. As the weight slowly starts to melt off (such a weird term, isn't it? melting off...) I'm becoming reacquainted with long forgotten facets of my body. My collar bone, for example. My hip bones, the tendons in my feet and hands, and my ribs, which you can't see but can easily feel. That whole process has been pretty cool, actually, but it also feels awkward. In my mind I'm a fat girl. In reality I've gotten down to the point where I'm like a normal sized person coated in 1-2 inches of squish. But I'm a little attached to the squish, you know? It's always been there, to my memory, and I see these pictures of women with 18-20% body fat and think, that while they look great, I can't imagine being that... fat-less. I call it my fat girl mentality. Imagining myself being a normal size almost seems unhealthy.

I didn't think it was a big deal until recently, when... well. I have a confession to make. Before Christmas when I weighed myself I was actually closer to 160 lbs. The last time I had weighed in, 3 weeks earlier, I was at 166. And two weeks before that, I was around 173 lbs. So in 5 weeks I had somehow lost ~13 lbs. Now, I'm someone who's used to losing .5-1 lbs/week. I know that bodies are strange things, and sometimes you'll see weight loss when you expect a gain or vise versa. But other than throwing in some sporadic 24 hour fasts, I wasn't doing anything different. I have no idea what caused it. Instead of being happy, though, I totally freaked out and derailed. I just felt wildly uncomfortable losing weight that fast. It's almost like I need time to mentally ease into the thought of getting thinner. It's weird, I know. So now I'm back to around 168 lbs. I felt quite silly, and a little guilty for freaking out like that. But what's done is done - time to keep truckin' forward. It'll probably take me a while for my body to get back on track but that's what this challenge is all about!

My goal isn't just to lose weight, btw. I'm also giving up dairy for the next 6 months to see how it affects some mild acne issues I've been having. And attempting to get some much needed exercise. The thought of having muscles is also very strange to me. It's a good thought though :P

Well, I've got a ton of Russian vocab. to memorize so I'm going to wrap this up. Until next time!

(P.S. To all of you fabulously fit people out there, especially those who live in colder climates... aren't you guys freezing!? I've noticed that since I've lost my nice thick layer of insulation I've had to go to greater lengths to stay warm this winter. I mean I'm not complaining ...but it kind of sucks, haha. It's like my toes are perpetually numb. I call shenanigans.)

EDIT: Also, as I read this I realize that it sounds like I'm one of those people that obsess over the scale. I really don't. I only use it maybe once or twice a month to gauge my progress. Most of the time I forget about it entirely o.O It was just on my mind today, since I'm doing the challenge 'n' all.

As far as my goals go, though, I'm doing pretty well! Last weekend I weighed in at around 166 lbs, which was down a bit from Christmas. I've consumed hardly any dairy products with the exception of butter. There was one incident where I ate some cheese, but it was only to be polite and it was a small amount. No biggie. I'm not including butter in this no dairy challenge, btw. I'm a college student and it's a cheap source of fat that I seem to tolerate well. If my acne issues persist I'll cut it out... reluctantly.

On the acne topic, the majority of my skin is quite clear at the moment!! I had one small pimple a few days ago but it only lasted a day. I'm getting pretty pumped about this . It would be awesome if dairy really was the cause behind my acne, because it's not something I would mind forgoing. I only crave it if I eat it, oddly enough. Once I cut it out for a week or two the cravings totally disappear. I wish more things were that easy to give up :P

The only goal I've been slacking off on is exercise. I've taken a few short walks but mostly I've been doing a lot of reading. I snagged myself a copy of Starting Strength and have been reading it on and off for the past week. Yep. I've decided that it's time for this gal to start LHT. I'm a bit nervous, a bit excited. I've never been into the weight lifting scene. Wish me luck!

Un-diet-related: I did some babysitting for my next door neighbor earlier this evening. Her house smelled very strongly of cheap Dollar Store vanilla candles. I was only there for 3.5 hrs but by the time I left I had a pressure headache and stuffy sinuses/runny nose. It feels just like the early stages of a cold. Wth? Can you really get a cold from inhaling strongly scented candles for too long? I'm hoping it doesn't last. I'm eating some swiss chard, sipping some turmeric tea, and popping some zinc supp's just in case though. 'Cause frankly, screw that. I made $31 though! So that's something.

Alright, well it's way past my bed time (even for a Friday :P). G'nite and stay classy ^-^

I'm a little bit sad to see that you didn't continue your thread. I've been looking for someone in my age group with similar goals to relate to. If you're still around, let me know! I'd love to know where your journey has taken you.