Making up is way hard to do

This woman we used to work with wore gobs of makeup. She wore super pale foundation and spread it so thickly that she looked as if wearing a really pretty mime mask. Her lips never appeared in public unlined or without a coat of dark red lipstick. Her eyes were always shadowed, concealed, lined, mascara-ed and, if there is more that can be done to eyes, we're sure she did that, too. She applied all her products flawlessly. (None of that heavy-handed Tammy Faye Baker technique for her.) This woman clearly devoted hours and hours of her life discovering what cosmetics could do for her.

We are as vain as the next woman. Probably way more so. Our business cards were once misprinted in a strange print shop Freudian slip to read not "Vivian" but "Vivain" and we kept them. But this woman's dedication to self-styling completely captivated us.

We loved looking at her. She was like living origami. The finished project was interesting only because of the complexity of human effort. (Would a machine-made paper crane still be beautiful?)

We thought of her because she would probably jump through goops for the chance to attend the annual Cosmetic Executive Women (CEW) awards. It is, as every industry flak likes to note, "the Oscars of the (fill-in-the-blank) industry!" This year more than 620 products were nominated in 33 categories for the CEW beauty awards. (Is it any wonder we go blank at the beauty counter?) CEW members -- of which there are more than 4,000 -- cast votes for the winners.

CEWIt exfollates. It soothes. It looks cool and feels good. The Tarte lip treatment product took a first.

The event draws all kinds of celebrities who sit pretty through 33 "And-the-award-for-best-lip-balm-on-a-cold-day-for-under-$5-goes-to . . ."

Are you dying to know which lipstick won? Check out the Cosmetic Executive Women site. (Psst, check out the feigned expression of delight on the losers lips.) The site has all the winning products with descriptions.

Next time you go to the cosmetic counters at Macy's or Nordstrom or Saks -- or walk the miles of aisles devoted to the stuff in the super stores like Target, Fred Meyer or Rite Aid -- you'll have a better idea of what to buy.

And maybe you'll see one of those girls who have turned their faces into performance art.

There's just so much stuff.

CEWOne of the skin care winners was Dove energy glow shimmering lotion in the under $15 category.