27.3.11

This year our team is coming out stronger than ever. Spring training has involved replacing carbon monoxide batteries, airing out the basement of mold and beer odors, taking down Christmas lights and dusting off our childhood baseball mitts. In honor of our local hero, Big Bob, we have chosen the team name Big Bob's Betches. He received a key to the city of Worcester after killing an armed robber at his Liquor Store by Assumption College. Get the details here.

Still working on the "getting into shape" bit, but we will put our game faces on and see you on the field.

After watching Step Brothers, everyone began using nailing it, yet nobody talks about John C. Reilly's drum performance during the performance at the Catalina Wine Mixer.

They put this scene in to obviously showcase Will Ferrell's vocal talent (not his spanish accent), but MOREOVER to let John rip it on the drums. Watch these two gems jam and really absorb the monster that is John C. Reilly.

6.2.11

Renowned swimmer and Sociology major, Molly O'Brien, finished her swimming career this Saturday afternoon. With family and friends cheering and crying in the stands, I snagged this snipe shot of her with her parents.

These two blondes were caught "Marley-ing" at Auburn's Coffee Mug on Saturday. Don't let their matching look intimidate you- they are just a bunch of tall friendly gals who love bridging friend groups.

The Charles Manson/Rasputin figure in the background rated their look

a 9 out of 10 for blending in with Worcester and its people.

The Marleys also rank Blanchard's 101 highly, a Worcester diner with charismatic wait staff. Our waitress today suggested we join her for the local strip joint (Hurricane Betty's) women's night! It is a Super Bowl special and the seats fly (we were told to reserve seats and show up early, definitely by 6:30). If her hot orange eye shadow didn't convince us, her account of the other women clients always in attendance of the Super Bowl's annual strip show was rousing. The "Amazon" women who always sit across the stage from her hog the strippers and call for attention. I'm glad I watched some football and tv ads instead of witnessing the avid female regulars get rowdy tonight.

For all of her generous insight we left her a hefty tip, paid in all singles.

27.1.11

If you live off campus, you must be reading this and screaming, "LOYOLA GYM?!?!? Why wasn't I invited!" Off-campus residents are not granted access to the elitist exercise club, popularly referred to as the sweaty speakeasy. Therefore, we must ask the administration what their reasoning is behind this prejudiced decision. I encourage writers to submit articles to The Crusader to gain equal access for all students, regardless of their race, gender or residence location.

25.1.11

The units of the compound release "Preparing for Climate Change: Responsible Snow Day Planning".

1. Lock down a keg from Big Bob.
2. Conduct the Triple S warm-up (preemptive shovel/ sled/ snow angel stretch).
3. Arm all building exits with sand and salt reinforcements.
4. Spray boots with water repellant protector.
5. Secure at least two seasons of the O.C. (preferably 1 and 2).
6. Pool magazines, nail polishes and 100 calorie packs in each house as bartering material.
7. Research blogs, newspapers, barstool, and entertaining political articles by or about Paul Giorgio.
8. Connect to Twitter and follow all of the Kardashians (including Mason) and the Worcester Sharks.
9. Print out E-res articles due Thursday.
10. Prepare a toast to Father McFarland.

DONTS
- Friday classes. Turn your fifth week day into Freedom Friday and dress in your most American of apparel (butt-less chaps, Native American headdresses, peace pipes, Levis)
- Now that it'sour final semester everything is considered "classic", so we can retire that term, broskis.
- Vegetarianism. Meat is in. So fresh. Raw.
- Flannel shirts, unless you are a Gallagher.
- Daisy Dukes and bikinis on top.
- Parents texting their kids on Friday night to ask how the library's going.
- Not exercising. Boost your energy by, say, joining a spin class! How about one that I teach?!
- Over priced cupcakes, they're out. Fortunately, gourmet tacos are IN!
- Valentine's Day. I'm making that statement now, so when it comes around I won't need to acknowledge it.

*Disclaimer: I usually seem to be ten years ahead of the trend, so confide in me as a reliable trend setter (Like when I tried making one-piece swimsuits cool in 9th grade. And now these C-List celebs are wearing them heeey heyyyy!!

No better way to wake up alone in a Southie row house than by construction men rummaging outside the window. Thanks for lodging me this weekend Southie and friends! My morning was salvaged by a few abandoned cans of diet coke on the sidewalk. CHA CHING- keeping those babies on ice for any guests that show up at my door.

New York Times travel section suggests 41 places to visit in 2011 AND how to spend 36 hours in Key West. Would be a darn good college spring break spot if only they had cheap rental houses, pools, beaches, bars and restaurants. But woe is me- looks like they do! I suppose all-inclusive resorts are just simply more convenient.

7.1.11

The rumor is confirmed- In Spring 2011, BRAVO will air the SEASON PREMIERE of The Real Housewives of Worcester, based at Holy Cross. Although the houses are not CRIBS worthy, and all of the women are unmarried, the characters still consider themselves to be housewives, because they are wedded to the idea of throwing the best parties in their houses. The apartments featured will be of utmost decadence and the characters decked out in Worcester's hottest fashions (pink Timbs, patriots jerseys and Fighting Irish tatts).

The season premieres with a dinner party at a certain College Hill apartment. The housewives will head to PriceChopper to pick up provisions, Walmart's hair salon for blowouts, Tanorama for a little bronzing, and if their wallets allow, a final stop at the Shell station for some scratch tickets, to add to the thrill of being frivolous!

The gentlemen attendees will pick up beer and libations from Big Bob's Liquor Store (and take their time taking photos in the back room's refrigerator, smoke some stogies/dip for a while, maybe pop some corn) and eventually show up to the party. Then drama will COMMENCE... Tune in at the end of the January for some scary, sexy debauchery.
I've been waiting all break to reveal the claddagh tattooed to my love handle.

6.1.11

Perez Hilton displayed the progression of the coffee company's logo. I have a print of the original Seattle store sign in my house.

The newest Starbucks mermaid is a bit too streamlined. Anyone notice the reduction of words on the BK menu? By numbering and picturing their menu items, Burger King puts wordy descriptions and names in the grave. This marketing tactic would be helpful in the Middle Ages when illiteracy was at its peek, but it must still be useful for immigrants yet to learn American burger variations.

Does eliminating names for the use of stupid symbols remind you of anyone?

New Year's resolution anyone? Not my thing. However, I am pursuing a new endeavor to learn some French. Once I'm well equipped, I will return to Paris and stay at the Palace of Versailles, rumored to convert to a luxury hotel in order to fund reparations.