All Articles Tagged "black women white men"

Interracial dating may be deemed as a touchy subject by many people, but in this installment of Madame On The Street, we discovered it’s no big deal for many New Yorkers. Check out what they had to say about their dating choices.

Interracial dating has been one of the biggest conversations within the black community. Black men have made it no secret their liking to white women. Regina King recently raised the argument that we as black women still have not become completely comfortable dating outside our race. I recently did a survey on a group of black women regarding their reasons for not dating men who are not of color. Through my findings it seems as though black women aren’t actually opposef to dating outside of their race. Part of the dilemma lies in women of color thinking that men outside of their race won’t be attracted to them. Below are the 5 top reasons black women are apprehensive about going there with a white guy.

When you see a black woman and a white man walking together, holding hands or with a baby in tow, what’s the first thing that comes to your head? There’s often a lot of assumptions that folks on both sides of the melanin spectrum come up with to justify their unions, and most of it has nothing to do what’s probably the real, honest-and-true reason: They LIKE each other–simple as that.

Sheesh. If I haven’t heard it all. And the list I could put together might be longer than the Dead Sea Scrolls, but for the sake of brevity, I’ll list a few of the most common bass-ackwards reasons people think black women and white men hook up.

Madame Noire had some fun on the red carpet at the launch party for Remy Martin V, Remy Martin’s new clear spirit. We caught up with Laz Alonso’s gorgeous self, Tyson Beckford’s chocolate goodness and new daddy Robin Thicke.

I had a recent conversation with a female associate – a white woman – who admitted to me that the life partner she was in search of must be a white dude.

As a black male, I had that natural, visceral “why he gotta be a WHITE dude??” response. That type of gut reaction, I think, is to be expected when directed from someone of the majority race to someone of a historically oppressed race. This woman must be a bona fide racist, right. She’d put the first Negro she caught in her net on the spit to feed her dogs if there were no consequences, true?

Fortunately for me, I’m able to move past the emotion to reach the nuances, and I’m not willing to condemn her as a racist scalliwag for her connubial preferences without digging a bit deeper.

Physical attraction is very subjective, and I don’t think it’s much of a coincidence that, by and large, we’re attracted to our own kind. Nor do I think it’s a testament to racism. For example, many of you are not attracted to anyone that’s not a black man, for many reasons. Does that necessarily make you a bigot? Methinks not.

On its face, it seems like interracial dating and mating with another minority–Hispanic, Asian, Middle Eastern–would seem a bit easier than hooking up with a WASP-y white guy, right? It seems to be easier. After all, you’re closer to matching in the melanin department, and as mutual minorities, it seems like you could have this “We’re all in this together! Us against The Man!” attitude. Well,turns out it’s just not that simple.

Aside from the superficial “skin issue,” you often take on a culture that might be completely foreign to you as a Westernized woman born and raised in the USA. And sadly, other minorities suffer from the same internal conflicts of colorism and bigotry that we do.

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It’s a late lonely night, you’re single, but you’re craving a bit of loving. Who ya’ gonna call? Your “Go-To- Guy”. Go-To Guys are men of many names: cutty buddies, friends-with-benefits, or get-some-in-a-glass case. Many Go-To-Guys are close friends harboring an unrequited romantic interest. While I won’t preach about morals, buyer beware: becoming sexually involved with a man who has feelings for you which you have no intentions of returning can be a dangerous game. Don’t lead any guy on if you can’t afford the resentment and bitterness that could follow. If you’re lucky, your Go-To-Guy will be a legitimate friend…that you lay every now and then. He’ll have a love life of his own that doesn’t necessarily rest on his hopes of using his man parts to pin down your heart. Having this type of arrangement can be tricky as well; be careful not to fall if you can’t afford to lose a friend. Because the moment the woman comes along that captures his heart, she’ll also have his peen under lock and key.

When the going gets good, your Go-To-Guy arrangement can come with all the benefits of having a boyfriend without any of the burdens. Could this type of situation save your lonely nights?