Haunted Baseball Team

Now in their 30s, six friends who once formed the Crazy Eights baseball team in grade-school reunite to pay their respects to one of their “team” who died. (Yes, your math is correct; That makes seven and the title says eight. You win a cookie.)

The dead guy’s will asks the surviving group to go the hell outta the way to an old house with an attic to open a chest they filled with toys and the eighth member of their team. Oops, they forgot about the corpse they stashed there.

The surviving (for now) group ends up in a condemned medical hospital nearby that used to experiment on children. Once inside they can’t get out. Even though this medical Disneyland™ hasn’t been used in decades, the power still comes on and there’s fresh coffee, water and sugar available. Oh, and the windows still work as one guy finds out when he’s crushed by one that shuts itself!

Measured amounts of cussing, yelling, wandering around in circles and really lame deaths. The only-seen-in-flashes ghost of the little girl who accidentally died in the locker all those suffocating years ago and wants revenge or something and everyone dies. That’s it.

Barely any blood, no one goes topless (even though porn legend Traci Lords co-stars) and no ghosts eating your face. Worse, Crazy Eights’(2006) backstory as seen in flashbacks of the medicinal experiments being done on kids is never fully explored nor validated. I need validation, dang it.