So asked Steve Searles when a town hired him to solve its bear problem

Armed men have surrounded the hilltop hideaway at 255 Ridgecrest Road again. The fugitive, a break-in specialist, won't come out. "I want the s.o.b. to feel some pain," special agent Steve Searles tells two cops with pump shotguns. "I want you to put some hurt on him." Nothing happens when Searles fires his pistol. Nor when he bangs loudly on the porch with a baseball bat. He tries pepper spray, yelling, "Hey, hey, come on out of there! You can't stay there!"

Pandemonium reigns when the outlaw--800 lbs. of overfed, visibly upset black bear--emerges at a dead run from the basement...