Chicago Runner PRs in Half Marathon Nine Years to the Day After Suicide Attempt

A year from now, when Facebook recaps September 23, Elise Zuke might see a picture of herself grinning and giving a huge thumbs-up to race photographers. On a bright, early-fall day, she and thousands of other runners took over the famous Lake Shore Drive on the south side of the city for the Chicago Half Marathon.

But before, she’d shy away from social media’s reminders. She didn’t need them to recall what happened on that same day just nine years ago.

Zuke had been dealing with depression since around age 12. She spent most of high school in and out of treatment centers and some time at a group home. After high school, Zuke went away to college for a year before returning to her mother’s home in the Chicago suburbs. Whatever her location or environment, her depression struggles were always right under the surface.

“It would get better at times, but it was pretty intense for years. I struggled for a long time,” she told Runner’s World.

On September 23, 2009—when she was 20 and taking community college classes—those struggles came to a head: Zuke rounded up all the extra pills she could find in the house and swallowed them.

Though she doesn’t recall this clearly now, she panicked and drove herself to the hospital. Doctors told her parents she might not make it. Her kidneys failed and she needed to go on dialysis. After a week of medical treatment and another stay in inpatient psychiatric care, a social worker recommended a long-term facility just for women. Zuke figured she didn’t have much to lose.

She stayed three months, during which things began to turn around.

“It was a long road. The first couple years were kind of rough, but then they started getting better and better,” she said. Eventually—inspired by a nurse who’d taken care of her in the hospital—she got a job as a nursing assistant, applied to nursing school, and moved to the city.

Her courseload included a fitness class, and the instructor asked everyone to run a mile. Zuke—who’d never been particularly athletic—did it, in about 13 minutes. “I was exhausted afterward, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” she said.

Students had to work out three times a week outside class. Zuke experimented with runs first on the treadmill, and then outside. She made changes to her eating habits and began losing weight. Eventually, she shed about 55 pounds.

The stress of work and school felt more manageable and her confidence soared—and she felt even more accomplished after crossing the finish line at her first race, an 8K Turkey Trot last year.

So she began looking to sign up for more races. Zuke ran the Shamrock Shuffle 8K this past spring and improved her time, from 44:16 to 41:48. That encouraged her to dream even bigger. She was running three days a week, gradually increasing her distances, and realized she could probably complete 13.1. She signed up for the Chicago Spring Half Marathon, on May 20.

She aimed to run under two hours—and finished in 1:56:58. “It started raining afterward; I walked from the race, I went and got a donut and it poured all the way home,” she said. “When I got home I just cried into the donut. It hit me, that I had really done it.”

With that victory under her belt, Zuke continued looking towards the future. She thought about September, still several months away. Usually, on the 23rd, she would usually just take a few minutes to think about how grateful she was to still be here. Some years, the date aligns with the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Out of the Darkness walk, and she’d join.

But this year, the walk fell on Saturday and the race on Sunday. She could think of no better way to commemorate her perseverance and survival than running that race.

Although she had already completed one half before, the race wasn’t easy. Around mile 9, things got tough. So Zuke thought about where she was in 2009—and kept running. “I went into the hospital in the morning; I was kind of telling myself, it was probably down to the minute, you were in a bed sick and not knowing how sick you were. And look at where you are nine years later,” she said.

Elise Zuke ended up beating her spring time by 21 seconds, and she’s already looking toward her next race.

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She was aiming to beat her previous time, but was so emotional near the end she didn’t even check the clock. When she was done, she stood near the food vendors just past the finish line and once again, cried.

For her, tears are far from signs of weakness. “It was probably the strongest I’ve ever felt in my life, just standing there afterward, even though I was hunched over the rail next to the ice cream truck.”

“It was probably the strongest I’ve ever felt in my life, just standing there afterward.”

When she finally did check her time, she learned she’d run a 1:56:37, improving her spring time by 21 seconds.

Her next goal? To keep going. She’s already signed up for the Shamrock Shuffle and the Spring Half Marathon next year.

“I really am grateful that running came into my life when it did because I don’t know that I would have appreciated it as much had I tried to start running earlier on in my recovery,” she said. “I realized that I had a lot of emotional strength having gotten through these things, but it was really powerful to feel the physical strength too, of getting stronger at running.”

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