Mi casa su casa

Author: Maria Cals

The last post of this blog that no one reads anymore (my fault, I know, for not keeping it properly updated), but I wanted to keep it complete anyways. We’re here. This is the last song.

Our idea was to originally record more than 10 songs, because we wanted to have more music in case we needed to release anything as bonus tracks. For the original track list I wanted 11 songs (simply because 11 is a number I like, hahaa. Lame, I know). Needless to say, we didn’t manage to plan and organize our schedule in order to do that, unfortunately! But that’s OK, too – we won’t be beating us up for that.

A (very) primary version of Born Dead, back when it was still called Thunderstorm. Totally different feelings.

Thing is, we kind of got to 11 tracks. However, one of them was a song in Portuguese (our native language) and I don’t know what happens with Indiscipline but we simply don’t manage to work well in our mother tongue, hahaha! This was our third try and I think after that, it’s no more. We worked on that song for a few weeks, wrote and rewrote lyrics I don’t remember how many times. We thought we had something going on in there, although it did feel a bit like a “filler” in the album to me…but we thought it was good enough to at least make it to the record.

Vira-Lata lyrics attempt

We were wrong. Oh, SO wrong. When we arrived to record the demo version with Felipe Eregion (our producer, and my husband), he stopped us right after the first chorus. He bluntly said: “there’s no way this song will be in the album. It just sucks”. It is funny now, because saying it/writing it like that, it might seem like we were offended, but we were…relieved, even. We kind of knew the song sucked, but didn’t want to face the cold, hard truth. When he told us we thought…well, ok then. We give up. Haha.

Even though that’s the story of another song – “Vira Lata”, a stillborn one at that – it is also about how the last song of the album happened. And eerily enough (because I swear I hadn’t noticed that coincidence until now, haha!), it is called “Born Dead”.

“Born Dead” happened kind of fast, even. When you’ve written so many songs in so little time you get used to things, your head thinks differently. Songwriting is a habit that requires daily work.
I had a riff I was trying to use, but couldn’t figure out how…I sat down with Felipe, he suggested some structure uses, BAM, we had the basics to work with. Alice wrote the story inspired by a death that happened in her family (under beyond sad circumstances). I put it into lyrics form, she came in to do the vocals and record it, and there we had it! “Born Dead”.

A post shared by Indiscipline (@indisciplineofficial) on Dec 24, 2016 at 5:59am PST

The rest is the rest. After those 10 songs, we worked with Gus Monsanto too, who helped us with vocal melodies and guitar solos and suggested some additions to our songs – a co-production work, basically. It was really nice having him on board for this ride. He was always helpful, and experienced enough to make us feel safe.

And that’s how our album (which we now know the name – Sanguinea), saw the light of day. Now you know. The whole process 😉

Have you ever had a friend you really cared about, but then for whatever reason (you had an argument / he or she let you down in any way / he or she simply moved away) you stopped talking, and lost contact for some time…and then, one day, or every day, you look back and miss this person. And you try to make it right and have that good friendship you used to have…but things are not the way they were. And they won’t be. Ever. Because all the bridges have burned.

I’ve been through this a few times. Always painful. I know it doesn’t happen like that with everybody, but that’s how it goes down with me…usually. So, in order to combine business with pleasure, I thought: let me write some lyrics about that. I had a good feeling about “Burning Bridges”, even if the subject was a little…touchy, to say the least. After all, when I recorded the song (and NO, definitely not, this one won’t be an acoustic tune…hahaha. Sorry about the demo, but it’s as much as I can give you without giving too much away), Felipe said it was probably the highlight of the album, and one of the best songs I’ve written. I liked the tune very much too. From the first day I started writing it, I felt like it flowed really naturally. Things were looking good, right? 🙂

Burning Bridges – part I

Burning Bridges – part II

Well…not so much! hahaha. Things can never be truly easy with me, and if they’re easy indeed, it’s because something is wrong. So I started writing the lyrics from a really personal perspective…and they weren’t good, at all. They were childish. Felipe said it was probably the weakest lyrics I’d penned so far. That was tough to hear, a little nerve-racking even. I had to start from scratch. Again.

I began drafting some ideas and thinking about what I could write. “Let’s use metaphors. Let’s use film-reference. Let’s use book-reference!” Some of you might know I’m a HUGE GRRM fan (yes, George R. R. Martin, the writer behind the “A Song of Ice and Fire” book series, also known as “Game of Thrones” for most of the world after the HBO TV series). What better story to portray the bridges that are burning and that have already burned than Arya Stark’s one? I’m not gonna say much else because I don’t wanna ruin things for people who haven’t read the books or watched the series yet. But if you plan on reading the books or watching the series (which I DEFINITELY recommend doing – BOTH!!), you’ll remember some of the concepts I used here. 😉

Not only did we reach our target, we have surpassed it! We’re now at 102%, and the project still goes on for 20 days (or a little less than that – sorry, I can’t remember now). Let’s reach even more! 😀 Available at the store, there are t-shirts, goodie bags, one of my guitars…and it’s all EXCLUSIVE to the project (no, I’m definitely NOT selling that guitar after the pledge is done, hahah!). Let’s not forget that.

Back to the 8th song…Nasty Roar!

“Nasty Roar” is one of the most aggressive songs of the album, if not THE most aggressive. In my opinion, it has this Black Label Society-ish atmosphere, combined with Alice in Chains (I can’t hide my influences xD). And it was born to be an anthem for the road – really. It was first written to be a song for a Rio de Janeiro motorcycle club, inspired by a poem/lyric penned by one of the club’s members. However, given it’s such strong music, we just had to use it for Indiscipline’s album.

Lyrics for Nasty Roar – page 1

Lyrics for Nasty Roar – page 2

“Nasty Roar” has heavy riffs and it led me into thinking the “whole-song” structure would come almost instantly. Boy, was I mistaken! It was a challenge. Actually, it IS a challenge, for this one is yet under construction/pre-production, but then again, they all are. Hahaha. Last Tuesday Alice came by and we worked on it, and the week before that, we were working on the very same thing. But as usual, hard work has paid off, and we’re now getting to the WOW point of this song. hahaha

First of all, I think I owe you all an apology…I haven’t updated this blog in more than 20 days, which is far more time than I’d like for it to be “non updated”. But being totally honest here, I simply couldn’t do it earlier. This is bigger than me. This song is bigger than me. This is why I was kind of postponing this post (it went too far, I know, I’m sorry!). But remember the song I was talking about that kept me up one night? Well…this it it.

(sorry, I know it’s almost unfair to share this demo with you guys, but the other ones I have already give up too much…I really want to leave the big surprises for the album. Please bear with me 🙂 I think it’s gonna be worth waiting for it)

“Fear in your Eyes” started being written in the end of 2015. I was playing my guitar, trying to come up with some new ideas, and then…magic “happened”, I listened to something I liked. At that time, at least. Because we were still dealing with the other 3 new songs (“Poison”, “Degrees of Shade” and “Ms. Daniel”), I saved the idea for later. Always playing it, kinda liking it, but also always feeling worried about it. I didn’t really know why. When it was time to finally record its demo, my doubt was there. I froze, I couldn’t play. I was in doubt about each and every riff, about everything. Tried a couple of other times, did not happen. Then I thought I had something…but I froze up recording it, again! Ahhhh. Talk about frustration.

I think it was the worst case of “writer’s block” I’ve ever had so far. I was desperate. Nothing sounded good enough. Until I thought of home…and it all made sense.

I know I’ve been saying one of our goals – and one of my main personal goals – was not to go to our “safe” places all the time (yes, exactly like thinking “verse/pre-chorus/chorus/verse” etc etc). But with this song, I couldn’t help it. It’s almost like I’d been gone for too long, and now I needed home. Oddly enough, or not, after that it all fell into place. When Alice came in with the vocal melodies, it made even more sense. Almost like a spiritual bonding. A message, really. Sometimes we just need to go back home.

Fear in your Eyes – original lyric sheet

Fear in your Eyes – original lyric sheet

>Also, about the lyrics… “Fear in Your Eyes” was the first song which lyrics began by the title, not by the lyrics itself (usually that’s the process with me, I write the lyrics and then figure out the title, but with this one it was actually the opposite). I first imagined a kind of horror story, like literally (monsters and such – I was watching too much “American Horror Story” at that time, I have to admit it *lol*). However, as I started writing it, something else seemed more important…it’s a horror story, no question about it, but not so much a fantasy one.

After all that struggle, I can say this is one of my favorite songs for this album. 🙂 Listening to it feels like it was all worthwhile.

“Degrees of Shade” was born in the acoustic guitar, like most of our songs are. But unlike them, this one will remain acoustic, which makes it our first ever acoustic song (even though I did record an electric guitar version, and it’s funny how it simply doesn’t fit). I don’t see us playing it live, since the spirit of Indiscipline is metal and I like my guitar as heavy as it gets. But never say never.

Also, “Degrees of Shade” means freedom. We didn’t know what we wanted to be the chorus, or verses, or bridges. It simply happened. I admit I thought one special part of the song would turn out to be the chorus, just because we all go to a safe place, but then…it didn’t. And it surprised me, in a really good way.

To me, this here is like Johnny Cash meets…darkness. But a darkness that can still see the sun after all. Weirdly enough, but I trust you’ll get what I say. And this is what this song is really about. Life can be fucked up, but hey, sometimes you get to see a light by the end of the tunnel. Coincidentally or not, “Degrees of Shade” was created when the day was rainy, but the sun shone. So…never lose hope. And we try NOT to say that in a cheap self-help book way.

Edit: my friend Marcos Cunha said “Degrees of Shade” had something of Alice in Chains in it. I had to agree and I loved the comparison so much I just had to put it here! hahaha. It does have something of Alice in Chains in it. 🙂

Ha! So this here is where it starts to get more interesting. “Ms. Daniel” is the first in a series of songs that I’ll be talking about from now on that have not been released, and that have not been played live. That means even more exclusivity for you, pledgers! Totally deserved, by the way (thank you <3). Just keep in mind I’ll remember to post demos that don’t spoil the surprises so much. Let’s keep the big ones for when the album is released 😉

First of all, well, Ms. Daniel was supposed to be the lyrics for “Take it or Leave it”! Haha! But when we started writing “Take it or Leave it”, it felt like it deserved lyrics that approached other themes. So we saved that idea for later, and I think these lyrics couldn’t be more appropriate to this song. Well, I think the title is kinda self-explanatory, but maybe you’ll get some other ideas when you finally read it. We wanted to talk about alcoholism, of course. But also about another kind of addiction, one that is not related to substances.

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Alice recording the bass for Ms. Daniel

Remember I said “Poison” was our punk-est song to date? Well, “Ms. Daniel” shows off all our grunge influences, namely Alice in Chains (Alice did a fine job with backing vocals, wait ’till you hear it). Also, it’s the only song in all the CD that has standard tuning instead of drop D. Even tough I’m convinced there are still some changes to be made, I think “Ms. Daniel” has a really catchy chorus that will make you sing both riff and vocal melody for days. I know I did.

Ideas for Ms. Daniel’s lyrics

As you already know, I sometimes just sit there and play with no intention whatsoever, and in one of those times I recorded this riff right here. Date of recording: June the 5th, 2015 (and again, sorry about my ass-face ahaha)

Months later, going through my riff library, I remembered this and thought it could be interesting to work on that idea. So it became “Ms. Daniel”‘s main riff. With all the things I’d mentioned before in mind (not using such obvious structure, yadda yadda yadda), I started from that and built “Ms. Daniel”. When I recorded it, Felipe suggested a change that I thought made the song sound even more what I wanted it to sound like – different.

From “Poison” onward, the songwriting process finally started getting the rhythm we’ve always wanted it to have in the first place. I set my mind to it, I really wanted to accomplish THE goal. So when I played my guitar, it was never in an innocent, “I’m just gonna sit here and play” mood. I knew I had to write music. When I couldn’t do it, I’d spend interminable hours of my day just thinking about what I’d do. I’d often be sad and desperate, wondering if I’d ever be able to produce again….and there was even one time when I lost my sleep over one of the songs (which by the way is now one of my favorites, hahaha). But that’s a story for another time – for now, let’s stick with “Poison”.

Poison lyrics with Alice’s notes

“Poison” just really came to me. The first riff, the verses, even most of the structure. By the way, regarding the structure, I tried not to be so obvious…and you might have noticed already that this is one of my personal challenges for the debut album, since I do believe in “In My Guts” we kinda stuck with the same formula in all of the songs. After having the structure kind of ready, Alice wrote the vocal melody, and then we started meeting weekly at her place to really just mend everything together. And that’s how we’ve been working so far, and it’s been working indeed. After that we bring the song to the rehearsal room and start playing it with Ale, and then it’s just practice, practice, practice. “Poison” was the first non-released song we started playing at our gigs, and maybe it will be the only one. We don’t wanna ruin the surprise. 😉

I consider “Poison” our “punk-est” song to date. Which was intentional, since the idea was to make a fast song, one that would work really well live. Check the video below and tell me what you think 😉