to really hate going to toddler groups?

I Find it really hard to strike up conversations with other parents. I get all PFB over DD when anyone else's child snatches or pushes (even though she is actually my precious third born). The noise levels hurt my ears and I'm always the one who ends up sat doing the gluing with 10 other kids whilst their parents sit in the corner talking and drinking tea. By the time I get home I feel like I need 5 valium and a bottle of whisky

YANBU I loathed toddler group. I felt like a freak when mothers with newborns were talking about wanting another. I found it hard to cope with my only child, had health issues that were undiagnosed and just basically wanted to stay in the warm house and drink tea

Ds was too young to play with others too, and I certainly didn't enjoy the endless chat about other people's kids.

Gosh yes, awful places - for the adults. I was the same as you and would always be the one sat playing with the other kids as DD was so clingy and all the other mothers would be sat chatting and I never got to drink my tea as I had all these little ones to entertain. When DS was born we stopped going altogether!

They're ok as long as you have some actual friends there to talk to. Otherwise it is mind numbingly boring, making polite chat with people on a limited range of subjects. Mainly poo and milk for the under 1s, what they eat and when they nap for 1-2, and what marvellous accomplishments they have from 2+. Ugh.

However, I would be lost without both of the ones DS and I go to, they have been the only source of people I have met and who I talk to since moving here (Australia). I have made friends there and they have helped me find good hairdressers, dentists, shops for specialist stuff - plus I have people I can invite round and who will invite me round. Seein that DH has no friends left here (well, ok, 2 but we've only seen either of them twice in 1.5y) I would be a social recluse without mine.

I actually dislike DS's activity groups more (football, dance) as the parents there don't seem to want to talk to you at all unless you already know them from elsewhere - which I don't.

I enjoyed very much taking my dcs to the park sometimes with other mums/toddlers so they got social interaction, exercise plus fresh air. And i was getting nice walk and fresh air too. Even in the winter is fine if you wear gloves, hat etc. And it is free! When it was very cold or rainy we went to each other's house.

I guess these groups are good if you are very isolated and live in a tiny flat or you have no toys/books at all at home. But they are not compulsory.

MInd you - I have to say that the playgroups I go to here seem to be very different from the ones people in the UK tend to describe - all the parents look out for all the children and no child is allowed to get away with being mean to another without someone intervening. Proper "community" parenting - I like that.

Memoo - the thing is, they aren't all created equally. Some are hidious and others are great - try some others, when you find a good one it's brilliant. Also, tell DD that Mummies aren't allowed to play with the toys at this one then she will learn to play by herself and near/with others while you enjoy some adult company and dress/undress the odd baby she brings you. Having to grub around on the floor for a couple of hours isn't much fun.