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Dear Dollie: The First of Many

Dear Dollie,

Last weekend was the 7th anniversary of the last time I saw you. I can hardly believe how much time has passed and at the same time feel like you’ve been gone even longer.

Not a day passes that I don’t think about you – sometimes just a passing memory, other times wondering what you would do in a certain situation, and still times when I wish so desperately to hug you that I feel my chest constrict.

Life is crazy. Adult life is crazy. Even more so than I ever could have expected. I recall so vividly sitting at your kitchen table, looking into your crystal blue eyes, and you sharing words of wisdom over peach cobbler and Nesquick hot chocolate. I tried to hold on to every word you said and certain affirmations have certainly stuck with me, like: “Don’t settle,” “Work hard,” and “Be true to you.” But there is so much I couldn’t comprehend yet at that age and now that I understand how challenging life is, wish so desperately to ask you those questions.

This is the first of many letters I plan to write to you. Though I often talk to you in my head, I need an outlet to share those thoughts with you. I hope that through doing this, your voice will become stronger inside of me and your wisdom will come into even sharper focus.

So much of who I am is because of you and I’m so grateful for the 18.5 years I got to share with you. Thank you, Grandma.