Tuesday, July 11, 2017

We're "your" trustworthy news source, even though we're all owned by six corporations or billionaires with political agendas.

The "news" has loomed large in The News--a classic self-referential loop in which the media itself becomes its own content. While the controversy over what constitutes "fake news" and "real news" has itself become "the news," the cold reality is all "news," "real" or otherwise, is content-free.

The "news" is so devoid of content that a simple software program could assemble a semi-random daily selection of headlines, scrolling banners, and radio/TV "news" reports from a pool of typical "news" stories and insert a bit of context (local highways that are congested, rough neighborhoods where shootings occur, names of local authorities, etc.), and the consumer of "news" would be hard-pressed to tell the difference between the randomly generated "news" and the "real news."

Here's a taste of the Random Content-Free News Generator Application that would produce "news" that was virtually indistinguishable from the "real" news.

Traffic is backed up near the (insert the usual congestion point) on the I-XX (local Interstate/highway). (TV/video: show randomly selected video clip of slow-moving traffic).

A serious accident occurred on I-XX (TV newscasters look somber if the wreck resulted in fatalities.)

Local Authorities held a news conference to Say What People Want to Hear about (insert hot-button topic): this concern is being addressed by authorities. We've got top people working on this--top people. (Newscasters look serious.)

A horrific terrorist attack occurred somewhere in the world--insert semi-randomly selected city, with preference given to Mideast and Central Asian war zones and Western capitals.

Bad weather of some kind is threatening us, or could threaten us shortly. (Insert video clip of flooding, heavy rain, or scorching heat in desert climes, etc.)

Sports celebrity XYZ apologizes for (choose one or more: spousal abuse, gambling, serial infidelity, public drunkenness, loutish treatment of adoring fans, etc.) while his wife/family/attorney hover in the background.

Coach XYZ explains why the team lost: the other team made some key plays, we lost focus, our guys/gals gave it their all, but we see some areas of improvement we're going to work on, etc.

The latest food fad taking the hipster 'hoods by storm is (combine traditional ingredient with an Asian or Indian flavor: kim-chee-flavored watermelon, etc.)

Somebody graduated (heart-warming story that gives newscasters a chance to smile): insert video of cute kindergartners collecting their diplomas, Grandmother in cap and gown, etc. (An over-credentialed society loves to see graduations, especially of kids, elders and underdogs--supporting the narrative that our meritocracy thrives on piling up credentials.)

Good news on the economy: insert manipulated official statistic on declining unemployment, higher median wages, rising home values, etc. Alternative report: insert story of an underdog taking ownership of a house for the first time, new food truck serving customers, etc.

You don't see this every day: insert YouTube clip of person being struck by lightning but miraculously walking away, truck overturning on a highway, spilling huge steel girders, etc.

More evidence surfaces that Russia Did Something Bad to Us (insert random clip of Putin, Russian missiles, etc.)

Self-congratulatory advertorial: We're doing a great job here, folks, of investigating what needs to be investigated and reporting what needs to be reported, etc. Count on us for "real news." We're "your" trustworthy news source, even though we're all owned by six corporations or billionaires with political agendas:

Terms of Service

All content on this blog is provided by Trewe LLC for informational purposes only. The owner of this blog makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this site or found by following any link on this site. The owner will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. The owner will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information. These terms and conditions of use are subject to change at anytime and without notice.

Our Privacy Policy:

Correspondents' email is strictly confidential. This site does not collect digital data from visitors or distribute cookies. Advertisements served by third-party advertising networks such as Adsense and Investing Channel may use cookies or collect information from visitors for the purpose of Interest-Based Advertising; if you wish to opt out of Interest-Based Advertising, please go to Opt out of interest-based advertising (The Network Advertising Initiative)If you have other privacy concerns relating to advertisements, please contact advertisers directly. Websites and blog links on the site's blog roll are posted at my discretion.

Our Commission Policy:

Though I earn a small commission on Amazon.com books and gift certificates purchased via links on my site, I receive no fees or compensation for any other non-advertising links or content posted on my site.

Weekly Musings Reports

"What makes you a channel worth paying for? It's actually pretty simple - you possess a clarity of thought that most of us can only dream of, and a perspective that allows you to focus on the truth with laser-like precision." Jim S.

The "unsubscribe" link is for when you find the usual drivel here insufferable.

Contribute via PayPal

Why I gratefully accept donations and why you might want to donate:

A 95-minute movie with 10 minutes of ads and a small popcorn costs $25.
If you enjoyed this site for at least 2 hours this year, and you donate $25, you already received more entertainment than you did from the movie. The other 100+ hours of enjoyment you receive here is FREE.

Subscribers and donors of $50 or more this year will receive exclusive weekly Musings Reports.

You have the immense moral satisfaction of aiding a poor dumb writer who seeks to inform, entertain and amuse you.

Contribute via Dwolla

Dwolla members can now subscribe to the weekly Musings Reports with a one-time
$50 payment; please email me,
as Dwolla does not provide me with your email: