You are Patchouli Knowledge, a physically frail and sickly magician of profound aptitude and power. You live in the Voile Archives of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, though you have constructed a tower elsewhere, without internal fixtures as yet, which you may or may not inhabit much. You are Friends with Remilia, the vampire who owns the mansion, who considers it entirely too much effort to try to feed off you. Your Magical Potency varies somewhat from day to day, depending on how long of an incantation you can manage before breaking off into a fit of coughs, and how much strain your body can handle in addition to the rigors of illness. You currently have a box of ninety five vials of Medication stored in the library to offset the worst of the days, however, though it will later exact a toll, and your new Magical Focus eases use of magic to a significant degree. It seems that Luck can play a reasonable part in keeping yourself healthy, though effects may vary, as can the Hakurei Hot Spring.

Your magic is based on Elementalism primarily, though you are also skilled in Diabolism and Other Summonings, which can be surprisingly versatile, particularly in combination with Golems. You can also create Homunculi, if you have the materials to hand. You do not have any suitable samples of the key ingredient, however.

You have currently returned from a brief sojourn outside to witness the final death throes of a minor magical catastrophe. Sakuya will no doubt be incensed when she discovers the state of the carpets.

Rumia, who has been following you like a lost puppy for a bit, has re-appeared nearby less one hand, having undertaken some level of physical battle, and wearing a smug and self-satisfied toothy grin, displaying subtle traces of pink blood.

[X] Look unimpressed at Rumia. "I trust you had a nice meal and are not going to be running wild, then?" - - [X] Ask what Marisa is making. - - - - [X] Check on your books and make sure they're safe, also check on your Yukkuri.

Witness, Gentelmen, another very subtle hint that the bounty idea is fundamentally flawed, as most youkai are simply going to eat a lost traveler, not help them. We need a new plan.

I personally like the youkai education/defense book distribution idea posited by an Anon is the last thread. Alongside my own personal touch of including a mandatory Seminar the first day of class, reviewing those same subjects.

Another idea I have is to issue individualized portkeys all leading back to Hogwarts grounds.

The drawbacks of that one include finding a group of powerful wizards to accomplished such a goal, and individuals not associated with Hogwarts will be SOL should they wander through a portal.

[X] This particular Rumia Youkai seems much more powerful than you remember. Consider the possibility that many other previously weak Youkai may now pose a much greater challenge. Be sure to ask Akyu to re-evalute them prior to producing a mass-distribution, outsider friendly version of her work. -[X] Ask what Marisa is making. - - [X] Check on your books and make sure they're safe, also check on your Yukkuri.

[X] Ask Rumia what kind of poor sod managed to strike her fancy. Hopefully, it was no one related to your job. [X] Ask what Marisa is making. [X] Go and finish getting gifts. That meeting is very soon after all.

[X] Ask Rumia what kind of poor sod managed to strike her fancy. Hopefully, it was no one related to your job. [X] Ask what Marisa is making. [X] Go and finish getting gifts. That meeting is very soon after all.

(x) "Interesting definition of poison. I suppose having one's wine grow caustic limbs and take a swing at you counts does broadly fit the category of 'visiting harm upon the recipient'." And it IS unique... maybe Snape would like it.

[X] Ask Rumia what kind of poor sod managed to strike her fancy. Hopefully, it was no one related to your job. [X] Ask what Marisa is making. [X] Go and finish getting gifts. That meeting is very soon after all.

[x] Ask Rumia what kind of poor sod managed to strike her fancy. Hopefully, it was no one related to your job. [x] Ask what Marisa is making. [x] Go and finish getting gifts. That meeting is very soon after all.

Just got caught up from the early March update. Will have to look through the past few threads to compose a list of things we needed to do. Hopefully before more inane nattering on what we should and should not do occurs.

While it is indeed true we are teaching DADA, this does not in general concern anything directly related to Gensokyo. I'd be surprised if there is any lesson material on it, considering what Albus had to resort to to find Pachouli. In fact, it was shown it would be impossible for him to find an induvidual born in Gensokyo.

So knowledge of english wizards about the fantasy realm is about zero. Random parts of this realm are likely going to randomly teleport to Hogwarts and vice versa. That's why providing information is so crucial. Doing it in a way that will amuse Yukari would be all the better. While it's certainly not necessary to explain every detail, certain powerful induviduals, say Yuuka Kazami for example, may warrant some attention. Hence using the yukkuri, with their penchant for copying powerful induviduals harmlessly seems such a perfect fit. Of course simply using a guidebook or even just words could suffice, albeit be maybe a bit dry/boring. I would not surprised if certain students, about half of Gryffindor, are still going to get themselves into trouble in the fantasy realm if we took only this route.

That reminds me, Koa told us her whole story. It should be interesting to verify whether devils (sp) can assume both parental roles. In actuality very interesting, as the only living relative will actually cause a fascinating contradiction if my calculations are correct. If presumably an analysis of fiendishness requires examining the soul of the subject, 1/7th of V is in Harry, making him 7/8ths harry, 1/8th V as harry's own soul is still pure and intact after that night. Provided of course the diabolism works as expected and one soul is no different from any other. If his mother is 1/4 devil and his father 1/2, then he should be 3/8ths or 36 on a scale of zero to 96 devilness. The actual result is actually going to be 31.5, somewhat less than expected. If Harry would have only gotten it from the mother's side then the answer should be simply 12 out of 96. Of course whether there are any noninvasive examination procedures can actually vary from setting to setting so this might not be at all feasible. Of course on the flipside Patchouli would suddenly instantly understand the entire Harry Potter plot upon discovery of this crucial little piece of the puzzle, for better or for worse.

>>56364You fail to consider that just informing them of it doesn't mean they will believe it. Albus certainly doesn't seem to so far. Using yukkuris would make it even worse. We're paid to teach them how to defend themselves. So let's do that. Patchouli isn't interested enough in them to go for the extra effort so far in the first place.

Ah whoops, that must've been a typo on my part, what I meant to say was: Can a devil be both mother and father of a child? By asking us that question we get information on something entirely else (see 56364)

>>56367You know that question made me think of the fact that Koakuma's body is, in the end, a construct made from her energies, so if Harry has innerited even a litle from her it might explain his resistance to the AK, but then comes the question of why his mother or father didn't? I don't think 'energy' can jump generations, unless we think of it like genes with the parents being carriers and it being only active in the infant. It's food for tought at least.

You're making a quite an erroneous assumption about souls. We know that V split his soul seven times, but that does not mean that the 'amount' of his soul in the pieces is equal (assuming that a soul can even be quantified in such a fashion) It would make more sense for the pieces split off earlier to be larger and the later ones smaller as the main piece shrinks by attrition.

To complicate the matter there's the fact that, alone of the pieces floating around, the one Harry got was completely unintentionally split off, so any means V may have had for controlling the amount was likely not in effect, though whether this means it would be 'larger' or 'smaller' is up to the author.

Even talking about soul amounts is moving well in advance of evidence -- given that the soul is more a conceptual object than a physical one, for all we know you can have 'a complete soul' or 'a partial soul' or 'no soul' but not varying amounts of 'partial'

That is quite interesting as well. Indeed the logic with the numbers above assumes two things. For one the way devils interact with the AK, for which we can find 'some' evidence in the HP books. Most of the time the simplest explanation is the right one is the mantra here. Of course, if the workings are more complicated then it is still highly unlikely the equations involved will 'mask' the inconsistency expected to happen. Makes sense to ask if this logic makes sense to Pachouli herself, she's likely to know how these things work.

Secondly indeed is that splicing off equalizes the 'amounts' in each. Indeed depending on how the concepts work this might be diffrent. The things that point toward how the AK works, are:

(1) Tom wanted to split off seven parts from the get-go, observe the interview with Slughorn. Iff he has control, splitting off equal parts makes the most sense. (2) The 'erroneous' or unintended part was split off last. (3) When the part that was split off first (the diary) was destroyed he did not notice. (4) When more parts were split off he did notice this. But it's unclear as to whether there was a metaphysical link notifying him or simply his paranoia and subsequent manual checks on the objects. (5) Splitting involves murder with magic, which is stated to 'rip the soul', and then some process defined in 'The Darkest Art'.

Iff the latter in (4) then there's some possibility of some other mechanism. But isn't it true that whatever happened, if we are to investigate Koakuma's story and the question posed; 'Can devils be both mother and father?', we're likely to find this out or at least get a hint. On the other hand, it may even be likely that we find everything out by simply observing. Pache has a tendency to do this, because she has a library in her head. Probably includes 'The Darkest Art' too.

Now 'should we do this' is something else, the posts above are all merely theory! 't might be wise not to. I'd imagine if Kahi hasn't thought through the entire thing yet that picking some large random variation for both factors nicely shuts down the entire theory. Because they will obfuscate whatever was done by Tom. With it, even the question about devils ('can be both mum and dad?) needs more than one subject to be answered. This is likely to be right out.

[] Prepare for the meeting [] See if you can get a copy of Akyu's guide. (May already have one in Voile.)

>>56369 Here, All this talk of souls made me think of a theory, if the murder of the parents was what caused the split, then Voldemort's soul fragment was in Harry before the final AK was cast! It could be that the 'consumption', real or not, of souls is what activated Harry's inherent resistance from his ancestry! Talk about Irony, it could even be an alternate explanation for Voldemort's allergy to Harry, who is instinctively trying to finish his meal, but being almost entirely human he is hurt by the soul not being 'digested'.

So why didn't we take a sample of that spilled werewolf blood? We might have been able to make interesting things out of the study of it.

Also, I believe it was referenced earlier that while the spider is a solid representation of earth, Rumia is a effectively a representation of moon, so couldn't she potentially set off a werewolf?

[X] Look unimpressed at Rumia. "I trust you had a nice meal and are not going to be running wild, then?" - - [X] Ask what Marisa is making. - - - - [X] Check on your books and make sure they're safe, also check on your Yukkuri.

[X] Devise an experiment to test Rumia's abilities and shadows on a werewolf. We don't have a test subject currently, but should we acquire one we should have this ironed out.

"The wolf man is fun." She declares. "I'll definitely... play with him again sometime~"

You snort.

..... Well, as long as it's just Greyback she's toying with, it's none of your concern.

Time to check up on the situation....

The sludgy muck creature, whatever it was, appears to have been highly caustic, acidic, and virally toxic. Marisa has already set up channels to divert the fumes out through some convenient apertures, where they will eventually dilute themselves enough in the air to disperse harmlessly into the atmosphere, and she has set to.... not even burning them away with ordinary fire, but blasting them with highly intense beams of searing light.

Not only the plush carpeting, but a great deal of the flooring underneath, is going to have to be ripped up and replaced in the face of this small debacle. You presume this was not the intended result of the poison you set the witch to brewing, but in the end you must admit that the art of potion brewing is not exactly your forte, though you know enough to casually dabble from time to time.

Fortunately, your books are unharmed, and on a lesser note, your specimens have been neither preyed upon nor tainted by this fiasco. Rachel makes a point out of moving close to you, and keeping you between herself and whatever Marisa is currently doing, sending suspicious looks around towards the witch.

She's getting too large to ride on your head any more, you realize. Less relevant, however, than accurately checking up on all of your running experiments and enclosures.

Didn't Marisa mention that one shopkeeper held an interest in...? Well, reaching adultood, and you hardly lack specimens. It might be annoying, but it is something to consider.

Well, then.

Everything should be in order for a casual round of gift-giving when you arrive to discuss class schedule arrangements. This seems to leave you with a span of time in which to deal with other matters.

[x] If there's nothing else pressing, timeskip to the timetable meeting. -[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, timeskip to the timetable meeting.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, timeskip to the timetable meeting. [X] Bring Tewi for luck.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, timeskip to the timetable meeting. [X] Bring Tewi for luck.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, remember to have copy(ies) of Akyu's work prepared. [X] Don't Bring Tewi. Instead see if you can give her something amusing. [X] Timeskip to the timetable meeting.

The sheer possibility of something which is near entirely arbitrary and out of your control happening should be enough for you to not even consider bringing Tewi. You could consider her a miniature Remilia, maybe a bit less evil. In order for that to benefit you; it needs to benefit her at least twice as much. If not, she's just going to have fun. The kind of fun you do not find entertaining.

Second, the invitation is for Patchouli only. It would not be polite to bring others whilst neglecting to tell the other instructors until this other party arrives at the meeting. The very possibility exists that this party has to wait outside the meeting area until the meeting is over, which likely means outside of your personal sight and mind. After all the results are secret until publicised a few days later.

>The sheer possibility of something which is near entirely arbitrary and out of your control happening should be enough for you to not even consider bringing Tewi

Holy crap! I didn't know Paranoid Anon was among us tonight. Chill dude, this quest isn't on lunatic modo like City Quest. I have the utmost confidence that Kahi would NEVER make Tewi do something crazy like start trafficking magic items to the Mafia.

Based on our interactions thus far, it would seem that Tewi likes us, or at the very least considers us to be a good friend. Personally delivering medicine. Taking days off to be with us. Dating us in all but name, and several other things.

She is not going to betray us unless we deliberately try to insult her.

Further, even if she does take actions that disrupt the order of our plans, we will still benefit due to such actions providing a distraction for Yukari, making our job easier later on.

[X] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [X] If there's nothing else pressing, timeskip to the timetable meeting. [X] Bring Tewi for luck.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, remember to have copy(ies) of Akyu's work prepared. [X] Don't Bring Tewi. Instead see if you can give her something amusing. [X] Timeskip to the timetable meeting.

I'm on board with bribing Tewi, if nothing else her luck boosts really help manage Patchouli's sickness. We do need to think of something Tewi would like.

>>57647The previous gifts were a porcelain statuette clay figure of herself and a moonsilver mochi mallet.

So we should aim for some sort of similar trinket, something simple but flattering and then overshoot hilariously again. What appeals to Tewi though? What do we know about her tastes? Does she like jewellery? We know she's got an eye for cosplay fancy outfits, maybe we could make her a nice hat or a robe or something.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [x] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, remember to have copy(ies) of Akyu's work prepared. [x] Don't bring Tewi. [x] Timeskip to the timetable meeting.

Did we ever properly thank Yamame for designing our lecture hall, and for looking after the yukkuri? Providing room and board at Remilia's expense only goes so far; it'd be nice to show some appreciation of our own.

[x] Use time to review the various good and bad points of various timetable slots, and lesson/lecture hall plans we already have in place. [X] There is no chance of getting all best slots for your classes. Determine now which year groups you wouldn't mind much to have at inconvenient times, so you know what you'll want when negotiations start. [x] If there's nothing else pressing, remember to have copy(ies) of Akyu's work prepared. [X] Don't Bring Tewi. Instead see if you can give her something amusing. [X] Timeskip to the timetable meeting.

Please remember you are dealing with people who take unicorns, vampires and dragons for granted and who canonically have zero common sense. I see no reason why they would intrinsically doubt anything Patchy says.

That does make me wonder; we do have a direct two-way connection to the Voile. Simply bringing 'something harmless, unique to gensokyo' over should suffice to straighten any and all disputes. The question is; do we want to?

>>57689We have a succubus, a physical embodiment of darkness that preys on the living, and we are personally familiar with a vampire princess, the luckiest rabbit in the world, and a mad scientist who is actually a frog.

Guys, given that most of the inhabitants of Gensyouko are rare or unique and different from the magical creatures most common to Europe, wouldn't it make more sense to give them general tips on defending themselves with the occasional in-depth examination of monsters they're actually likely to meet in the Wizarding World?

You're going to have a pot of tea and sit down to read one of your books. Marisa has no trouble finishing the poison when proper instructions are followed to the letter, and no further mishaps occur. You don't ask what it does, exactly, and she doesn't offer the information. She does hint, suggestively, around how it would be great if there was someone that could help patching her ramshackle cottage back together, but you fail to see how this is really your problem, and she is hardly asking you directly. You do, however, send her off a little early to handle settling personal matters such as that.

It gives you the free time to be sure you've not let her arrange things for a robbery later, anyway.

Later on, Remi saunters back through, with sister and maid in tow, and rolls a skull onto one of your desks haphazardly. Only the maid is un-spattered with red, and no, you don't care what they got up to, and yes you'll look into the skull, but not now, you are busy.

Eventually, much later, you fall asleep in your chair, Rachel having nodded off in your lap while trying to read some of the more complicated words, traces of tea left in your cup by half a plate of dinner, whatever that was. You weren't paying much attention, and it's hardly like that was the important matter.

---

The day is Aug 30, 2 days to term. It is Tuesday, Day of War and Fire. -- Yamame, Medicine Backlash -6Your health level is 52/100, a markedly average state of health for you. Average is not, in fact, what others would consider 'good'. You have had worse days by far.

---

You blearily open your eyes to consider the library, and that Rachel is chewing on your sleeve in her slumber. The spider is about somewhere, and breakfast will be available at some point. Tea can quickly be summoned.

There's a skull sitting on one of your desks, with a curious set of carvings in its dome. They look almost self-inflicted, but carved deep enough that an error would have left the risk of accidental brain-punctures.

There's a vial of something which you are quite sure will bring unpleasant results to the imbiber, and which is likely to be difficult at the least to detect when mixed with that specific alcohol brand.

It's probably going to be a while before all relevant parties are gathered, as you cannot imagine that other instructors would be well pleased by having to lurch out of their own beddings at the time of night it would currently be in England.

You might bear some advantage by being slightly more well rested, but it would most certainly be lost with the animosity garnered in turn.

Even so.

The best slots of time are immediately following a meal, with post-luncheon classes taking pride of place. Slots following breakfast and supper are still preferable but less so, due to the little whelps not having entirely shaken the sleep out of their heads or from their being tired after a day of what could at the very least be theoretically called comprehensive study.

Slots of time immediately before a meal are the worst of the available possibilities. Particularly, you would suspect, immediately before breakfast as this would bring both the problematic misfortune of being immediately before a meal and of having all the children still being half-asleep at the time.

You believe that standard timeslots do not actually include anything before breakfast or after supper time, but exceptions can always be made, and the students will simply have to learn to live with it. For example, you recall.... something about astronomy, late at night by requirement, the details escape you just at this moment. You yawn. As well, there was that fellow who only taught 'classes', what was it, once a week?

No, you believe that you had partially settled on seven different classes, one for every year. Though you had not exactly set the whens and the wherefores of it in stone. And it is not yet, of course, too late for you to change your mind.

[x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes.

>>58458Not a bad vote, but remember we're not really in control of when we get who.

[X] Medicine. No doubts the negotiations will be tiring enough already.

[X] Decide when you would rather have who. It is rather unlikely you will be able to avoid the worst time slots for all years. -[X] Even if one class per day of the week sounds fine to you, you can probably expect them to complain about not hacing weekends off. And they'll be less cooperative that way. Ponder if you would rather give more or less the same lesson twice a day (two groups close by year) or two different lessons in the same day (two group distant by year) , if you have to.

[X] Get started on that skull to pass time. Remilia will probably complain if you put it off for too long, so you may as well get started now.

>>58461First, remember that Patchouli respect the engagements she take. That doesn't seem like an idea that would do so.

Second, THAT Koakuma teaching? Are you nuts? Laziness is no excuse for stupid ways to lessen work.

Third, she's equally uninterested in ALL students. It's like the idea for lessons for select students: unless she actually find someone she would want to bother teaching more than others, she's highly unlikely to go out of her way to teach.

>>58463Koakuma may make for a useful teaching aid in some capacity, so long as that is to take advantage of her being, well, pretty much exactly the kind of thing these children are supposedly learning to defend themselves against. And so long as we keep very strict control over her.

That said, I don't see much in the way of benefit to having her around for every session. Or very often at all.

If we're really in need of teaching aids, Marisa or (if we can cajole her into it) Alice would probably be a lot more helpful. We do have a lot more leverage over Marisa, but I get the feeling that Alice would be far more inclined to not cause mischief. Assuming we could find something to make it worth her time. Tewi could be helpful. She's got a whole lot of spare time, has already been perfectly friendly to the staff on her brief visit, and doesn't have any real motivation to cause any kind of mayhem that will come on Patchy personally. Though, she'd probably be limited to strictly menial work, having no particular aptitude for magic so far as we've seen or for education that doesn't involve sharp objects and mental trauma.

That's assuming of course that we do decide we need the assistance after all. Patchy may well be able to handle things completely on her own, but you never know when she's going to have a particularly ill day...

[x] Take your medicine [x] Do something you have not done yet: Consider the possibilities the Voile itself has in teaching magic. Not as a location, but as a source of written material only. It must be a veritable treasure trove of knowledge. You have a direct connection to it, it would be a shame not to use this.

[x] Do things that will improve your health for today. Like taking medicine, for starters. -[x] Might want to visit Eirin and ask her if she has something stronger, before taking the medicine, though. [x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x] Begin preparations for dueling in Hogwart's style.

We should have visited the Hakurei's hotspring. It's effects only take plac eon the next day, right?

>Might want to visit Eirin and ask her if she has something stronger, before taking the medicine, though.

A bit to early for that, I think? We visited her barely a day - or two - ago. Managed to strike some kind of deal specifics of which I do not remember now.

>Koakuma may make for a useful teaching aid in some capacity

...Maybe some kind of lesser succubus, or something alike?

The lesson on "Hello, there exists things what are going to mindrape you while looking all pretty and innocent" might be important in future, but bringing Koa as example might go wrong in hilariously big number of ways. Someone less dangerous would work better.

[x] Do things that will improve your health for today. Like taking medicine, for starters. [x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year. -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x]Ask Sakuya about the possibility of timehax on the classroom. Surely there has to be something that woman desires. [x] Begin preparations for the duel [x] Consider finding an individual knowledgeable on the subject, or at the very least, a book detailing the rules/regulations of duels, along with common/uncommon spells seen therein.

What about the days where patchy is too sick to even consider getting out of bed? We obviously need to keep our options open in terms of substitute teachers

Also, there has to be something we could do for Sakuya that would temporarily override her "only serve the mistress" thing. Hot tub in her room? Massage chair? Getting her laid? Patchy is a magician of profound aptitude and power for goodness' sake.

[x] Do things that will improve your health for today. Like taking medicine, for starters. -[x] Might want to visit Eirin and ask her if she has something stronger, before taking the medicine, though. [x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x] Begin preparations for dueling in Hogwart's style.

[x] Do things that will improve your health for today. Like taking medicine, for starters. [x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year. -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x]Ask Sakuya about the possibility of timehax on the classroom. Surely there has to be something that woman desires. [x] Begin preparations for the duel [x] Consider finding an individual knowledgeable on the subject, or at the very least, a book detailing the rules/regulations of duels, along with common/uncommon spells seen therein.

Not really big on getting stronger medicine at this junction. We just /got/ a fresh set of doses, so getting anything stronger isn't likely to be helpful, and would probably just have more awful repercussions.

Also, I'm tentatively thinking that Patchy could potentially summon things for the kids to have (relatively safe) practical tests with.

Iknoright? Eirin isn't a miracle worker. Well...actually...she is, but still these votes for stronger medicine are completely unfounded. Something crazy like that would probably require a full-on medical physical.

One does not simply tell a magician of profound aptitude and power to "Bend over and cough".

...What's with all the votes on learning about duel and things like that?

Prepare? We pretty much have all morning free and you don't even want to get started on the skull?

In the first place, is there even anything to prepare for a duel for 'fun' rather than serious business? Hell, Patchouli saw one, remember? The point, which even she should get, would be about beating the opponent without killing or seriously injuring him. Finer details or rules can be talked about with Flitwick.

What the hell do you guys want about duels more than that? Any vote on duel I saw is a waste of time.

[x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year. -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x]Ask Sakuya about the possibility of timehax on the classroom. Surely there has to be something that woman desires. [x] Begin preparations for the duel [x] Consider finding an individual knowledgeable on the subject, or at the very least, a book detailing the rules/regulations of duels, along with common/uncommon spells seen therein.

As fun as sicking our personal demonic sociopath on the Griffindors and watching the resulting bloodbath would be, I doubt it would help our reputation as a teacher very much.

Patchy had to spend whole days outlining the terms of their contract to keep Koakuma from screwing her over, so I doubt simply giving her the simple and vague order to "teach children" will end well.

And on the "Fake Remilia" thing, when Remi went to Bourgin's shop Bourgin pulled out a portrait of an older woman with red hair who was supposedly the Scarlet Devil. Could that be our culprit?

[x] Arrange Classes by convenience correlating with year. -- [x] Those nearer to First Year will have their classes immediately after lunch or so -- [x] Since Higher years will have more practical and physical examinations and we're more likely to get away with stray bullets on those caught napping They can take the morningtime classes. [x]Ask Sakuya about the possibility of timehax on the classroom. Surely there has to be something that woman desires. [x] Begin preparations for the duel [x] Consider finding an individual knowledgeable on the subject, or at the very least, a book detailing the rules/regulations of duels, along with common/uncommon spells seen therein.

Well, ultimately I'm indifferent to what the class schedule will be... (Well, unless it turns out we can get the best schedule by beating everyone else into the ground.) And since it isn't relevant yet, I won't bother voting.

Similarly with the duel, as mentioned by >>58489. (Though looking into possible records of Flitwick's previous contests might not be a bad idea, assuming such exist.)

[X] Take care of yourself. Collapsing in front of a bunch of wizards won't do. Take your medicine and break your fast as appropriate. [X] Make sure the spider and Marisa have something to keep themselves occupied today. Yukkuri chores, if nothing else comes to mind, or possibly subcontract them to Sakuya for the day. [X] Finish preparations for any gifts you plan on bringing, like the doctored wine. [X] Since there will likely still be time to kill, see what puzzle Remilia has brought you until it is time to leave.

(And, yes, leaving Koa unsupervised with a bunch of children qualifies as a bad idea.)

[X] Take care of yourself. Collapsing in front of a bunch of wizards won't do. Take your medicine and break your fast as appropriate. [X] Make sure the spider have something to herself occupied today. Yukkuri chores, if nothing else comes to mind, or possibly subcontract her to Sakuya for the day. [X] Finish preparations for any gifts you plan on bringing, like the doctored wine. [X] Since there will likely still be time to kill, see what puzzle Remilia has brought you until it is time to leave.

Patchy did witness a duel and for a friendly non-formal match that's probably enough, but at the same time she does seem like the type to read up on things for the sake of reading up on them. On the other grasping appendage, people have mentioned studying the skull is a good way to get on Remilia's better side and if we put it off, we may never do it.

[X] Take care of yourself. Collapsing in front of a bunch of wizards won't do. Take your medicine and break your fast as appropriate. [X] Make sure the spider have something to herself occupied today. Yukkuri chores, if nothing else comes to mind, or possibly subcontract her to Sakuya for the day. [X] Finish preparations for any gifts you plan on bringing, like the doctored wine. [X] Since there will likely still be time to kill, see what puzzle Remilia has brought you until it is time to leave.

The fic that hooked me on this site actually updated? Happiness! Here's hoping it does so more than once every three months.

Now for votes:

[X] Take care of yourself. Collapsing in front of a bunch of wizards won't do. Take your medicine and break your fast as appropriate. [X] Make sure the spider have something to herself occupied today. Yukkuri chores, if nothing else comes to mind, or possibly subcontract her to Sakuya for the day. [X] Finish preparations for any gifts you plan on bringing, like the doctored wine. [X] Since there will likely still be time to kill, see what puzzle Remilia has brought you until it is time to leave.

Before anything else, you shift Rachel to a cushion and drink a dose of medicine. Probably no danger of actually collapsing, but with an initial meeting.... better to present yourself at your best, and only appear mildly unhealthy, than to care nothing for first impressions. +14, health = 66/100

Yes.

Odds of accidentally vomiting on a co-worker now suitably minimized, you call a maid both for a light breakfast and to kick Koakuma awake so you can set her to leafing through books and noting relevant information.

For the moment, you inspect that skull.

..... Interesting. It doesn't correspond to any sort of mystic circle or eldritch marking you're aware of. If anything, it looks... close to several possibilities, but in the sense that bits and pieces were snatched from one diagram or another, and pieced together from memory, based on instructions passed along via whispers through a line of over a dozen partially senile geriatrics in various states of deafness.

In short, the carvings are befuddling. Maybe it did something while the owner of this skull was alive, maybe it was just an enormous practical joke, maybe it's a last-ditch booby trap set up to catch a curious magician trying to figure out what it's supposed to do. It could just be paranoia, but you tend towards it being a trap. Which is why you were sure to make a fairy do anything that might trigger it.

But after inspection leads to nothing in the way of explosions or instant incinerations or transformations, you just go ahead and have a tooth removed for some probably safer and more in-depth study. After you finish breakfast.

There are some principles of contagion involved, and after the identification rituals fail to turn up much of interest that isn't immediately apparent, you turn to some of those before redirecting Koakuma to research on british magical duelists and dueling traditions.

You don't get much in the way of response. 'Pings' from nearby can be immediately dismissed, as most likely responses from bone flecks, disregarded blood-splatter, ingested material of any sort, or the rest of the skull itself. Leaving those nearby, you have a small handful of location responses, and spend a good hour determining where, exactly, those general locations would be on a map and making a few marks across Europe.

You could, of course, narrow things down further and even figure out exactly what it is that is responding, but that would take far more effort than you're willing to put into Remilia's curiosity. Particularly as such spells are well outside of your field of specialty, and so you have much better things to do at the moment than lock down a few weeks of work for this and only this.

Happily, you will note that Remilia has unrestricted access to your portal, and so she may of course feel free to investigate further at her leisure.

As far as dueling goes...

It seems that there is a vast plethora of unique possibilities inherent beyond the most simple variation of 'two mages throw spells at each other until one doesn't get back up in a set time'. The spells they call Unforgivables are, of course, unforgivable to use on another wizard, but everything else seems to, like the exact rules of the conflict, be determined before the duel begins.

This aside, the wizards seem interestingly loathe to record significant details of dueling matches and tournaments. This person proved victorious, and that one found themselves only taking second place despite a cunning move.... they record 'what' happened, in a general sense, but not how.

Flitwick himself is recorded as having quite the string of official victories to his name, though reading between the lines of what details are offered.... many wizards seem quick to label his victories down to having taken full use of natural advantages.... advantages which at the same time, indeed almost the same breath, they varyingly mock, scorn, or pity the man for. Curious.

Albus, by comparison, has very few duels to his name throughout his life. Of those, nearly all are presented in the sense that nobody questioned who the victor would be from the beginning, that 'naturally' Dumbledore won this duel, or mentioning that that one even today holds the record for fewest wagers made on the outcome of an official duel. All of these matches are many years apart from one another, unlike Flitwick's majority of duels within a competitive span of years, and the scant details paint an unusually vivid portraiture.

You send the spider off to play with the specimens and keep them tractable while you think. Neither of them really lose duels. Flitwick, however, wins. While comparatively, Albus WINS, to the point where for a minimum of a decade afterward, people do not challenge him to duels. It's interesting. You're not sure which would be more of a worthwhile experience to match yourself against. Naturally, victory is never guaranteed in any sort of combat, and even less so against these.

Hm.

It doesn't seem like any of the other staff members have a notable dueling history. At least in the books you have on hand.

In any case, you'll have to focus on getting more ideal teaching slots for the younger students. Probably the first three or four years. Ignoring Dumbledore's flippancy on the matter, you're more likely to get away with making examples of older students who should know better, so it's really only reasonable. Logical.

The gifts are prepared, with one of the wine bottles poisoned and another mixed with a harmless additive that brings even less effect than simply cutting the alcohol with water, a simple measure to keep the potions professor on his toes and prevent him from solving the puzzle in the most simple way: buying a third bottle and testing to see which one matches it identically.

Sakuya.....

... Considering her prior response to requests outside the bounds of the mansion itself, you don't think it would actually be worth it to try to arrange for altered time-flows. It wouldn't be impossible to bargain for such a thing, you expect, but on the one hand you really can't think of a reason to go to the extra effort for a place you will only be inhabiting for a year, and on the other you would end up owing something in turn to either and most likely Remilia, or Sakuya herself.

Probably too troublesome to bother with unless you have a specific and pressing need. No matter.

..... You frown thoughtfully, unable to shake the pressing feeling that there are matters slipping your mind.

Only stuff that come to mind is eating breakfast, stopping by the hot springs to be in top condition, picking up Tewi, starting on Sanae's giant golem, finding out when the next full moon is so we can help Alistair out before literally and figuratively throwing him to the wolves as the new alpha, taking the new wandfocus out for a test drive in terms of battle spells so we don't end up over or under doing things,

And most importantly; actually coming up with a syllabus for the school year.

Rumia is under contract to help us, so where she chooses to go or do is entirely up to her, and is of no concern to us. Hopefully.

Guess I better get started on making my actual vote...how about

[X] Breakfast. Most important meal of the day and whatnot. [X] Ask Yamame for a quick status report concerning the pastry monsters. [X] Quickly create a giant statue of Suwako and portal it to the Moriya Shrine with a note saying you will animate it if, and only if, Sanae fulfils her part of the bargain. [X] Invite Tewi out for a relaxing trip to the Hakurai Hot Springs, and subsequent wizard duel. [X] while soaking, consider your undoubtedly vast repertoire of magical spell, abilities, personal enchantments and magical artifacts. How are each of them are affected by your new focus? -[X] Also consider the many lessons learned from all the times you've had to neutralize rival magicians of profound aptitude and power.

Probably a good idea to placate Sanae so she doesn't demand we sire her ten children like she was clearing thinking to ask of us.

>stopping by the hot springs to be in top conditionStill don't know when the duel will be and the effect will apply for the next day.

>picking up TewiNo. She'll just get bored like last time.

>starting on Sanae's giant golemNOPE. We only need to do so IF we have to pick a student from her and it's her request.

>finding out when the next full moon is so we can help Alistair out before literally and figuratively throwing him to the wolves as the new alphaHe has golems we left. He'll be fine.

>taking the new wandfocus out for a test drive in terms of battle spells so we don't end up over or under doing thingsCome on now. Patchouli do know her own magic better than that and I'm pretty sure she has been using it since she got it.

And Rumia is important because her threat level is now 'unknown'. Maybe not dangerous to us, but we sure as hell don't need her snacking on others teachers. Thus...

[X] Check the time. Did you lose track of it? [X] ...You never saw Rumia leaving, didn't you? Is she still in your shadow? -[X] If she still is, tell her she cannot eat the staff at school.

Spider, present and accounted for. Specimens, same. Koakuma, busy at work. Time is acceptable, and Marisa is no longer any of your concern. This leaves....

You don't know when Rumia left. If Rumia left.

You frown thoughtfully at your shadow, and then poke at it with a stick and thread-like extensions of Lunar energy. After this fails to provoke a response, you call after the youkai.

No response.

Well. That is either a welcome relief, or highly alarming. You need only decide which. Is she in there at all? If so, then is she ignoring you, or... just sleeping, perhaps? Would she register your attempts to get her attention if she was asleep? You weren't aware that you would need to know the depths of her slumber, today. Still...

No, that didn't seem to be quite it. Hm.

Notes? No, documentation of what experimentation you have running is still present and accurate, you've been jotting a bit down here and there. Doesn't seem to be enough for conclusive results yet, of course.

Hm.

.... Well, it's more of an annoyance than anything else, much like the odd and vague concern that only becomes fully realized when you return from a jaunt to discover you've left the kettle on, and even if you can't recall now you're sure you'll figure it out sooner or later. For now, a bracing pot of tea, perhaps, and some pastries.

Right, then. You've dawdled long enough that it's probably a bit after breakfast time in Britain. At this point you would probably still be a touch early, but it would be acceptable to arrive.

A quick rereading of last day, I think there are some things we didn't get.

[X] Do a quick mental check to see if you have a spell that reminds you when you're forgetting something. [X] You didn't see the greeks, come to think of it. [X] The gifts may be ready, but are they all here? Yesterday, didn't you put off getting a plant and chocolate for later? [X] Once all is ready, go to England.

[X] Do a quick mental check to see if you have a spell that reminds you when you're forgetting something. [X] You didn't see the greeks, come to think of it. [X] The gifts may be ready, but are they all here? Yesterday, didn't you put off getting a plant and chocolate for later? [X] Once all is ready, go to England.

[X] Do a quick mental check to see if you have a spell that reminds you when you're forgetting something. [X] You didn't see the greeks, come to think of it. [X] The gifts may be ready, but are they all here? Yesterday, didn't you put off getting a plant and chocolate for later? [X] Once all is ready, go to England. [X] Consider asking Tewi if she wants to watch you duel after you set a date.

Well, if you know such a cantrip, you've long since forgotten it. The irony is not lost on you, though you can safely say that you have indeed forgotten more magic than most ever bother to learn. Though, such a spell reminds you much of one of the more useless little artifacts you noticed in passing: a trinket that changes color only to remind you that there is something you have failed to recall, and otherwise does nothing and assists in no fashion regarding discovering what you have forgotten.

You can only imagine that the bauble has contributed to more than a few vexed and sleepless nights.

In any case, it doesn't seem like you're going to recall in a flash of-where are the greeks?

Where the devil are the greeks? How on earth did you manage to lose a pair of giants, when one is still inhabiting a ten foot tall mass of masonry? They should be right here.....

... Well, now that you know what you're looking for, it isn't much trouble to hunt them out, when they are of your own working. Hm.

Oh.

They seem to have wandered into the deeper portions of the library. And here you had been under the impressions that they could feign some vestiges of intelligence. And it seems that they have crossed paths with certain emplaced defenses that you had left to their own devices, judging by the wounds and damage.

Hm.

Well, this won't do. Can't have your things destroying each other. Even so, while you don't recall if you explicitly instructed them not to go into the depths of the shelves, you know that they were present when you mentioned it to Alistair.

You take a moment to shift them on lists so that the defenses won't be trying to kill them, but can still toy with them as they like. They still need to be punished, after all, and this will do. You'll collect them from the depths... well, eventually. If you don't forget. Or they'll find their own way out, possibly.

Still, now that you have recalled, that is a weight off your mind.

And.... now that you recall, you cannot remember collecting this potted plant or chocolate set. Even so, they are here. Obviously, you must have picked them up at some point, or otherwise the collection was just so impossibly dull that you edited it out of your memory as a self defense measure.

No matter.

On to Britain.

--

Even having dawdled so long, you arrive somewhat earlier than the rest. Severus Snape is already present, of course, locked in fierce but hushed debate with a very severe looking woman, who slips in and out of a scottish accent as her temper flares and dies down. Introductions are made quickly, revealing her to be madame McGonagall, before the dance of sharp words begins anew.

A ghost is the next arrival, floating in through the wall and muttering softly to himself about goblins. He does not remain long, however, and is generally disregarded up to the point where he seems to start, mutters something about wondering if the kettle was on, and floats out through an entirely different wall.

From then staff arrive in ones and twos, Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank, substitute Care, Rolanda Hooch, instructor on Flying, Burbage and Babbling entering in the middle of their own quiet conversation, and a very small man, Flitwick, jogging at the rate of a taller person's casual stroll before he cheerily introduces himself and stacks several books on top of a chair before taking his seat.

..... could the 'unfair advantage' spoken of in his dueling records simply be that, diminutive as the man is, he presents a smaller profile to target? It seems inane, and yet... there you have it.

Sprout enters next, with un-noticed smudges of dirt behind her ears and what is either a gardening trowel or a large knife tucked away beneath her robes. You take a mental note of it.

Vector and Sinistra arrive next, one after the other, and after that everyone seems to have arrived as the divination instructor totters in, smelling faintly of rum and incense.

There's a round of proper introductions, through which temporary goodwill for you seems to increase, and you receive a number of various feathers cut into ink quills.

Fabulous. Well, it is hardly as though you were expecting equivalent returns.

As it winds down, you bring out the masterstroke. You've put more thought into these bottles than anything else, really.

"Both of these bottles have been tampered with." You state, as the potions instructor considers them. "One contains poison, with effects I will not relate. The other contains a neutral additive, with no effects beyond a slight alteration of flavor. I have not bothered to keep note of which is which, and could not say even were I inclined to spoil the discovery. As a Potions Master, I trust that this should not be beyond your means?"

There is a subtle muttering of disapproval through the rest of the staff, but Snape's only response is to slowly raise one eyebrow.

".... Madame, are you quite certain that Ravenclaw is indeed where the Hat had claimed you would be most suited?" He asks, dryly. "One might think... otherwise."

"Sadly, while I am more than able to play a proper game, I have neither the inclination nor the patience to spend all my time upon such amusements."

Snape smiles slightly, and before you can move on to your final arrangement, determining a show-duel, he reaches within his robes and withdraws a large and fanning spread of parchment slips.

"As it so happens, I myself have a... gift, to spread around the table for Hogwarts instructors." He says, voice carrying a slight tone of smugness. "As it so happens, there was a... slight miscommunication between myself and Lucius, and it seems that he has procured significantly more tickets to tomorrow's regional Quiddich match than I had intended, at a startlingly favorable discount. Happily, there are more than enough tickets to go around. And as the match is between the Harpies and the Cannons, there should be little in the way of wagers made, save by the most foolishly desperate and... simply foolish."

"And as the match is tomorrow, if we wish to take advantage of this... unusual generosity, then we must of course settle matters here more swiftly, and perhaps with haste that might provoke mis-steps of judgement that we might later regret? Hm, Severus?" McGonagall says, sharply.

"... Ah? And wherever has gone the Gryffindor creed, that fortune favor those who step boldly forward?" Snape muses. "Why, Minerva. One would almost think I concern you..."

"Enough of that."

.... The banter dying down, you begin to bring up your final gambit, only to be interrupted once more.

"Hem." the squat and intruding figure in pink coughs. "My goodness. I should hope I am not late to the discussion?"

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... - - [X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. - - [X] Keep looking at her as if trying to work out who she is, before giving up and turning to one of the other instructors for an introduction?

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher.

[X] If the interruption isn't worth listening to, then just go about your proposition whiteout bothering to acknowledge The Pink One, you've been interrupted enough already. [X] Try to react fast while keeping your wits about you, being the only one new at this dance might push other to try and steamroll you, forcefulness could be the only way to get the schedule you want.

Should we tell about the portals at the conclusion of the meeting, preferably after Umbridge has left?

X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher.

Guh...hated that bitch. Hopefully she gets chased into the forest and raped by centaurs in this AU as well.

[X] If the interruption isn't worth listening to, then just go about your proposition whiteout bothering to acknowledge The Pink One, you've been interrupted enough already. [X] Try to react fast while keeping your wits about you, being the only one new at this dance might push other to try and steamroll you, forcefulness could be the only way to get the schedule you want.

X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher.

No need to unnecessarily antagonize the woman. If she wants to start a confrontation let her, but don't give her any ammunition she could use against us before she's even shown her hand.

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher. --[X]Introduce yourself and try to get the measure of this creature.

We know OOC that she's a horribly spiteful thing and mostly incompetent (but not entirely, the one thing she's good at is abusing her political clout) but Patchy doesn't know that yet.

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher.

Since we're friendly (kind of) with Lucius, she shouldn't be able to do much to us right?

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? --[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher.

[X] Frog youkai, obviously. The mannerisms, the look... clever, though, and probably powerful to survive in the Outside. -[X] Keep an eye on her during the proceedings. Having your coworkers eaten would be unfortunate.

[X] Just look at the pink thing. It certainly did not match any of the description of the staff provided to you... -[X] Still, had not Dumbledore mention something about political adversity... ah, this must be that Fudge appointee. -[X] Isn't she some sort of security inspector? Why would she be here now? -[X] Frog youkai, obviously. The mannerisms, the look... clever, though, and probably powerful to survive in the Outside.

--[X] Perhaps she is here to interfere with you, since she was the one Fudge wanted as a Defense teacher. --[X] Keep an eye on her during the proceedings. Having your coworkers eaten would be unfortunate.

What is the gambit that you are referring to that we got interupted in? I'm a bit lost

It's your initial thought, in any case. Wide mouth, slightly bulging eyes, the general cast of the woman's features...

It might be unkind to say so, but yes, the woman very much calls to mind a large toad in an unfortunately chosen wig.

"... And you are?" madame Sprout inquires, when nobody else seems willing to take the initiative.

"Hem. My word. Dumbledore does not keep his instructors up to date with matters of importance?" The woman puffs up with a touch of smugness, as the assembled instructors shift slightly. You can see a clear look of annoyance pass over a couple of faces, before they are schooled into polite disinterest. She doesn't seem bothered by it, but pauses to frown very slightly at you before continuing. "I am, of course, the duly Ministry-appointed Inquisitor of Scholastics."

.... Hm.

"I was under the impression that your post was regarding matters of security."

"Of course. How else, after all, can the Ministry remain assured of the safety and well being of our children if I do not.... Inquire, as it were. One must be sure, after all, that the instruction given matches... reasonable expectations for the dears."

Ah.

You begin to see. And feathers are ruffled as, without a thought of propriety, in some sort of ill advised move to display superiority, the woman plucks up one of Flitwick's mouthful miniature muffins and eats it without a second thought.

"Of course, I simply must be here in order to properly determine when I should ready class audits and surprise inspections."

[X] 'Reasonable expectations of safety and well-being', how dull. Make a note to deal with the woman in some way so that she doesn't noticeably affect your own plans for classes. Perhaps Tewi might enjoy someone to trick and embarrass, if she should find herself bored. [X] Compared to this one, your eccentricities and maladies will come off minor in comparison. Do try to speak your inquiries and requests after she makes demands.

[x]If noone else does anything, move the conversation along. -[x]If the toad ever does something else out of line, call her out on it. If she continues or begins to disturb you or your gifts you are given recall s spell to remove her from the room and shut the door behind her. --[x] Above all, take no shit. The others will realise not to mess with you and you'll become quite popular if you manage to shut this toad up.

[X] You could ask why she could not wait for them to be done here. But should you? [X] If you still have a chance to offer the duel, do so. But you may have to wait until Umbridge's mood-killing presence is gone first. Even if the duel can no longer be used simply to gain goodwill from Flitwick, this could be used to awe students and make them more likely to listen to you in classes. [X] You probably should avoid discussing your ideas for lessons in her presence. She will likely become a worse annoyance. [X] If she ever leaves for a moment, point out Severus had the right idea and that aiming to be done today means they don't have to deal with her tomorrow.

Completely off topic, but I really want to test the effect of imbuing an elemental spirit into a werewolf. We hesitated to imbue a water spirit into that mafia chick because it was uncertain her feeble human mind could subjugate the will of the spirit. That clearly wouldn't be an issue with a werewolf though, since the mental dominance the Wolf shows is far superior to a human, and would almost guarantee a successful human/spirit binding.

[X] Make a mental note to summon the most annoying, relentlessly antagonising demon you can think of to pester the woman for the rest of her miserable life. Nobody interrupts Patchouli Knowledge. [x]If noone else does anything, move the conversation along.

[X] You could ask why she could not wait for them to be done here. But should you? Set phasers to "ignore". [X] If you still have a chance to offer the duel, do so. [X] You probably should avoid discussing your ideas for lessons in her presence. She will likely become a worse annoyance. [X] If worse comes to worse and she continues to be a disruption, use the power of the Moon to punish her establish an aura of silence in the air around (and possibly inside) her, preferably as discretely as possible. Hopefully she'll take the hint and go away. As a nod to proper etiquette (and legal technicalities), if possible try to avoid actually targeting her, even if you have to manually shift the effect to follow her until she leaves. If she's that bad, it's not like you'd get anything useful done with her around anyway.

Outright assaulting her is probably a bad idea at this point. Simple isolation should be sufficient to deal with her for now.

[X] You could ask why she could not wait for them to be done here. But should you? Set phasers to "ignore". [X] If you still have a chance to offer the duel, do so. [X] You probably should avoid discussing your ideas for lessons in her presence. She will likely become a worse annoyance. [X] If worse comes to worse and she continues to be a disruption, use the power of the Moon to punish her establish an aura of silence in the air around (and possibly inside) her, preferably as discretely as possible. Hopefully she'll take the hint and go away.

Day of the sun was said to give a bit of trouble to moon spells, but even then they were possible.

Today might be the day of war, but we can remain relatively civil by not burning her to cinders just yet...

[X] You could ask why she could not wait for them to be done here. But should you? Set phasers to "ignore". [X] If you still have a chance to offer the duel, do so. [X] You probably should avoid discussing your ideas for lessons in her presence. She will likely become a worse annoyance. [X] If worse comes to worse and she continues to be a disruption, use the power of the Moon to punish her establish an aura of silence in the air around (and possibly inside) her, preferably as discretely as possible. [X] It should ideally be a bijective barrier. Hopefully she'll either take the hint and go away, or not take the hint and continue the tirade by talking to the aether instead of bothering you, without noticing what just happened. Nor would any snide remarks or non-ministry-policy-compliant educational choices on your part influence your relation with her whatsoever. [X] Continue the discussion without the intruder as if nothing had happened. Alternatively consider, if the former would not seem to bear fruit or be prudent due to developments: [X] Pretend to be vaguely interested and involve yourself politely minimalistically in conversation, but do not speak of anything concrete or meaningful in the presence of the toad. (like a politician)

Day of the sun was said to give a bit of trouble to moon spells, but even then they were possible. Magic should be a last resort here. I have an inkling whichever party resorts to it first is bound to lose the most in this strange ritual.

Today might be the day of war, but we can remain relatively civil by not burning her to cinders just yet...

One way or another, it's always better to let the ones interfering with matters be the first to escalate things. That way, even if your responses are... perhaps somewhat more extreme than others quite approve of, they can do nothing but grudgingly agree that you were entirely within your rights to respond, if perhaps not to set someone's bones alight inside of their flesh until they were supported by ash and fell to the ground a pile of charred and screaming meat.

You understand that there's a potion to grow skeletons back, though. People invent the most fascinating things, sometimes.

"What on earth is this...? Muggle garbage." Umbridge sniffs, tossing one of the packages of food back as she makes her way around the room, clearly and blatantly poking through other people's things as though.... well, as though she didn't care that she was starting a fight which left her grossly outnumbered by over ten to one. Counting on either the overshadowing presence of official authority to protect her, or simply that the other instructors are too polite to appropriately respond to her spraying rudeness all over the room.

".... With introductions finally out of the way, I would like a word, Master of Charms, Flitwick." You speak up. "In my opinion as Defense Instructor, I would like to arrange an exhibition match for student spectation."

"Oh my stars." the little man chirps, seeming at the same time both surprised and delighted by the suggestion. "A duel, you say? Why, we haven't proctored official duels in Hogwarts since.... well, there was that aborted shot at a duelling club a couple of years back. Goodness, it was terrible how young Lockheart turned the whole thing into such a mess, with only one meeting."

"As I recall, Severus had his own hand in that... debacle." McGonagall points out sharply, prompting a slight snort from the potions master in response.

"Pleased as I am to hear your opinion that I can ruin things merely with my presence, Minerva, I'm afraid my own contribution to the matter was minor. I did, I confess, take the opportunity to knock the man down a peg or three when prompted. This aside? I made a suggestion or two about matching partners. I was hardly involved much further than that."

"Aye, an' ye'll be saying next that you'd not have had the slightest notion that pairing those two against each other could ha' possibly gone wrong, then?" McGonagall counters, accent dropping for a moment and finishing finishing with a snort.

"Dear me. You don't think that I might have more important things to do with my time, perhaps, than keep track of every little schoolboy quarrel that springs up in this castle? Surprisingly, omniscience is not among the list of my varied talents." Snape drawls.

"Yes, yes, well done to the both of you." Flitwick says, waving a hand to reclaim the conversation. "In any case, I would be more than willing to look into the arrangements-"

"Hem."

Umbridge, it seems, cannot abide not being the full focus of attention for any length of time.

"Now, I should hardly think that the students really need to be displayed examples of such callous barbarism." Umbridge sniffs.

Flitwick looks as though he has been physically struck.

"Barbarism." he chokes out. "The dueling tradition stretches back before Hogwarts itself was founded, as an honorable competition-"

"Need I remind you, that that was a time where we would swing swords at one another as well, and did not carry wands but great clubs of wood, in case we felt like knocking someone in the head with them?" Umbridge says, snippily. "Barbaric practices held over from a barbaric time. How can we claim to be surprised at our children growing to become footpads and highwaymen and every sort of ruffian under the sun when we demonstrate how to do it in their very schooling? Really. Progress for no more than the sake of saying 'we have progressed'... naturally, it must be discouraged. But at the same time, useless traditions held and observed for no reason beyond that it is traditional to observe them, should not those also be discarded? Particularly when they warp the minds of the poor children..."

Goodness.

The woman is so full of shit that the room is starting to smell like a stable. It doesn't help that she's so smug about it as well, as she plucks up one of McGonagall's candies and makes a quiet noise of surprised pleasure at the alcohol content inside, even as the Mistress of Transfiguration's eyes and lips narrow.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place?

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place?

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed, and if they ever wish to become good duelers, they must first acquire knowledge and practice of magic overall. And isn't that a school's purpose? [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

I'm considering inviting the other teachers to a tea party back at the mansion. If the toad gets killed attempting to invade...well, I don't anticipate many complaints.

Umbridge don't wish for them to become duelers. You may want to change that argument. Argue instead for the beauty of magic shown in a duel. And ask if she really just compared wands and magics to sword and clubs.

As for telling Umbridge she is rude, this will just open hostilities. Having teachers rebel is exactly what she wants so she can have an excuse to have them arrested.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

There. I took out reference to teaching the kids dueling. Now if Umbridge tries to protest Patchy using a duel to earn respect, she implies teachers shouldn't try to earn respect, which damages her own credibility for being there.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

[x] If she goes for the wine, give her a warning that she probably shouldn't touch it. She'll likely go for some anyways, of course, but at least you can claim you tried~ [x] The duels of your home are (mostly) elegant, refined, and -to those with an eye for aesthetics- beautiful to behold; and are (mostly) non-lethal. The worst that usually comes from them are a few bruises and some rumpled clothing.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant. +[x] If she goes for the wine, give her a warning that she probably shouldn't touch it. She'll likely go for some anyways, of course, but at least you can claim you tried. [x] The duels of your home are elegant, refined, and -to those with an eye for aesthetics- beautiful to behold; and are non-lethal. The worst that usually comes from them are a few bruises and some rumpled clothing.

[x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant. +[x] If she goes for the wine, give her a warning that she probably shouldn't touch it. She'll likely go for some anyways, of course, but at least you can claim you tried.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant. +[x] If she goes for the wine, give her a warning that she probably shouldn't touch it. She'll likely go for some anyways, of course, but at least you can claim you tried. [x] The duels of your home are elegant, refined, and -to those with an eye for aesthetics- beautiful to behold; and are non-lethal. The worst that usually comes from them are a few bruises and some rumpled clothing.

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Mention the duel you witnessed some time ago. So the two of them, along with everyone that watched, were barbarians too? -[X] Ask her if she really just compared wands and magic to swords and clubs. -[x] Nevertheless, the duel is more than just a presentation. It is a form to acclimate oneself to the customs of Hogwart's magical system, and a form of gathering respect from the students; young folk are easily impressed. [X] Ask about her actual power and authority here and see if there's a hole you can use to tell her advice has been heard and will be ignored. Does she actually have enough power to stop that duel in the first place? [x] Warn her that she is being impolite and extremely rude. Such behavior is improper to any authority, and it stains both her and her organization's reputations. It only raises unrest and distrust, and she may very well end up causing a rebellion of sorts. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

Oh jeez, not that again. How about we just don't take medecine the day before the duel (unless roll is too low), if the duel happens, to not have a penalty at the start of teh day and be as high as possible?

While I don't necessarily disagree with most of these, it seems a bit early for Patchy to be actively arguing about... well, anything.

[X] Arguing with uncultured idiots is beneath you. And tiring. (Oh, so tiring...) Ignore her and continue your discussion with Flitwick. (A measuring look of scorn is acceptable before dismissing her, though.) -[X] Feel to use something like the above arguments defending dueling to calm down Flitwick, if necessary. [X] What is that annoying buzzing? See if you can get others to shun her through your example. Acknowledging she exists defeats the purpose, of course, though allusions to unacceptable behavior and defective personalities may naturally feature in discussions you have. [X] If toad-woman goes for the wine and Snape lets her (it is no longer yours, after all), ding him points for using an animal test subject.

(Well, it's a bit more effort than the magical silence would have been, but it should have a similar end result..)

[X] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [X] Arguing with uncultured idiots is beneath you. And tiring. (Oh, so tiring...) Ignore her and continue your discussion with Flitwick. -[X] Feel free to defend dueling to calm down Flitwick, if necessary.

We already know her actual power here, Dumbledore mentioned it earlier. Nada. She can "advice" and "suggest", but in the end the final decision lies with the teachers. Of course, she'll run off crying to tattle on anything and anyone she doesn't like, but she has no actual power herself.

I think a good argument in favor of the dueling would be something along the lines of: "I have been hired to teach the students how to defend themselves against the dark arts. A harmless display between teachers will demonstrate to the students many of the less harmless situations they may find themselves in once they leave here. And is it not in all our interests that the young men and women leaving Hogwarts are fully prepared for whatever life may bring them?" Turn the argument around, sieze the initiative and make her defend herself. We're not the one doing anything wrong. That and the "equating magic with clubs and swords" argument. Seriously, how low has the Outside fallen if people like her are allowed to call themselves "practicioners of the Art".

[x] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [x] Arguing with uncultured idiots is beneath you. And tiring. (Oh, so tiring...) Ignore her and continue your discussion with Flitwick. - [x] Feel free to defend dueling to calm down Flitwick, if necessary.

>>58650You do realize that "whatever she wants" is likely to be "shit that gets us immediately expelled from our teaching position and will make a lot of people very upset with us", right? She's an annoying little toad, but a toad with powerful (well, not compared to the average denizen of Gensokyo) inconvenient friends.

>>58651I think the vote to ignore her, with the subvote of defending dueling, means something like thoroughly shutting her down with a few quick counterarguments before ignoring her. Just outright ignoring her immediately would make it seem as if her believe she's "won" because we don't have anything to say in our defense. But if we first reduce her arguments to nothing but the hot air that they are, and then dismissing her as unworthy of the breath it would take to adress her again (which is usually in rather limited supply, too, she should be happy we're acknowledging her at all) she can't really do much other than throw a tantrum, because it is clear that she's not capable of holding an intellectual (or even intelligent) conversation with us.

[x] Clearly the toad needs a reminder on why, exactly, clubs and swords are necessary. Contact Koakuma telepathically. Tell her to intimidate or eliminate the toad in a way that is difficult to trace, preferably nonmagical. (A sniper rifle, perhaps?)

[x] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [x] Arguing with uncultured idiots is beneath you. And tiring. (Oh, so tiring...) Ignore her and continue your discussion with Flitwick. - [x] Feel free to defend dueling to calm down Flitwick, if necessary.

I suspect Umbridge doesn't actually have the authority to stop us, so just ignore her until she gets so irritated she does something we can smite her for, like Patchy was thinking in the update.

Thread 19: Dumbledore explained the situation to Patchouli. >"However, for the moment, I have limited matters to the degree I am capable of. She will, currently, only be able to fill an advisory role, and make suggestions, as it were. Final and full autonomy still, in all cases, remains with the instructors themselves."

She has no actual authority, anything she says is no more than a request and we are free to disregard any of her "suggestions" if we feel like it. She does have inconvenient friends, however, so we probably can't ignore her outright, or she'll whine at the ministry until they give her some real authority. We're likely better off to throw her a bone every once in a while, instead of just filtering out everything she says, no matter how nice that would be. Then again, Patchouli spent a week just reading the contract out loud when she summoned Koakuma. I'm sure she can "take suggestions into consideration" and twist it in such a way as to fulfill the letter of a troublesome demand, rather than the spirit, while still keeping her classes up to the high standard such an important subject deserves.

[x] It should be clear to you now that she will be poison for the lessons you intend. [x] Arguing with uncultured idiots is beneath you. And tiring. (Oh, so tiring...) Ignore her and continue your discussion with Flitwick. - [x] Feel free to defend dueling to calm down Flitwick, if necessary. [x]Consider if there might be some manner of demon you could bind to impersonate her and take her place. It would no doubt be a good deal more pleasant.

Um, I know that we readers already know all the little details about Umbridge, but Patchouli herself knows very little other than that she appears to be a bit of a bothersome person that likes sticking her nose into other people's business.

Some of the reprimands suggested are a bit of an overkill for your first meeting with someone.

I don't agree with you. If I had the option to summon an untraceable demon assassins to hunt down the people who particularly irk me, I probably wouldn't hesitate to do it. Just saying. Not trying to sound edgy or anything.

>>58662It is not "untraceable". Everything leaves a trace, no matter how small. And if someone were to suddenly die around here, you can bet they'd do everything possible to find out who's responsible. Besides, this is a CYOA that's based on an already established character, not a blank slate, so we have to at least try and consider what would be in and out of character for her. And conjuring demons to kill or injure someone who left a bada terrible an atrocious first impression is not exactly Patchouli's style.

Dear GODS, she's lucky we decided not to ask Sakuya to cook something. Imagine what would happen if she found out someone had called her cooking "garbage" simply because it wasn't made by a local wizard. Neither she nor Remilia (an insult to Sakuya's cooking is an insult to her own tastes and palate) would be, in any way, happy about it.

That's a thought, actually. If we really need to get rid of her, we should do a meet and greet at Remilia's "as a show of goodwill after we unfortunately did not have a positive first meeting". We warn her beforehand, in no uncertain way, with witnesses around, that she must be polite while meeting our friend or the consenquences are her own. Perhaps even invite Dumbledore Snape or someone else along so we have a witness to the event itself. (Dumbledore is too nice for this. Snape, on the other hand, is ruthless enough to see the plot for what it is without trying to stop it. He would agree that it is her own fault for insulting our host and that she should have known better. And we're all better off without her. That is, of course, an unspoken agreement.) Wizards are no strangers to meeting magical creatures, as well as the risks involved if you were to be... Less than civil with them. So nobody would be too suspicious if someone in SDM causes her to disappear for being an annoying little twat. We did, after all, warn her. We have witnesses.

[X] You have brought gifts for all the other staff here, except one person. That just wouldn't be becoming of you. Do a little cantrip and present ms. Umbridge with a cutesy looking pink envelope, containing a free trip/invite to the Scarlet Devil Mansion, tea included. She must learn that you're not the 'barbarian' you're pretending to be here.

>>58672Slightly better than physical assault, but again we don't want it to directly lead back to us. In the books she is carried off by centaurs and Harry and Hermione were technically responsible for it, even if she assaulted them herself first, by bringing her there. That's kind of what I meant with my suggedtion about Remilia. If we attack her directly in any way it will reflect poorly on us. But if we arrange a situation where she brings retribution on herself from an outside source, then that's completely different.

For whatever reason, her superiors want every bit of interference they can force into the school, and their primary target seems to be the class you are in charge of. Possibly, probably even, due to it being the weakest target, a position with unusual and rapid turn-over. And for whatever reason, they refuse to wait another year, for your term of employment to expire on its own.

Annoying.

Hm, as far as her personal power goes, she's simply an advisor, though. Theoretically, in any case. Of course, if she feels that isn't enough, there are connections....

.... Well, in the end, once you've been paid it's irrelevant. They might even believe that they could pass laws expressly forbidding foreign teachers, just as the most obvious possibility, and win that way. But in the end, that only works for as long as you are willing to obey British law, and you don't actually care much if you end up keeping your side of the bargain legally or illegally. And after all, there are always loopholes.

Well, you'd rather not stick your neck out to be the subversive sort of influence breaking down authority that they would almost have to try to hammer back into line, though. Usually, the mage with a secure defense already prepared and inhabited is at an advantage against intrusion, but in turn, they would be almost obligated to keep trying.

Still.

... It might be simpler to just get rid of the thorn before it starts tickling uncomfortably at your side.

That brings problems of its own, though. A simple disappearance, and people will come looking. Replacement.... there's obviously little to be done, there. People are likely to notice things, sudden changes like odd stenches, skin hanging poorly off its inhabitant, subtle errors, or the propensity to capture and eat children.

... there's ways around it, of course, but it all requires further and further effort, and more and more opportunities for things to go alarmingly wrong, and if you are going to be rid of someone for simply being an annoyance you would much rather do so in a way which does not involve any reasonable chance of simply exchanging one annoyance for an even greater one.

You'd have been rid of that forest witch long since, if that were the case.

Still. Flitwick seems to have his temper in check, even if his mouth is moving a little like a fish from the insult, and only a slight trace of red shows itself. But even so.

"Weapons have their place." You point out. "... Though you will have to forgive the, ahem, foreign barbarian for speaking out of turn, perhaps? But the inhabitants of the place I currently reside within, ah... I should say that a manner of dueling tradition is quite strict and rigidly enforced, as it makes arguments far simpler. Fewer casualties, less rebuilding of architecture involved. Usually. Tavern brawls, I am told, can get... quite out of hand, particularly under certain circumstances."

Umbridge sniffs.

"I can hardly imagine the sort of ruffians that cannot settle their differences with words."

"... To some extent, I might agree with the sentiment." You admit. It's certainly easier to move things smoothly along if people just agree with what you say instead of insisting on arguing every step of the way, in any case. "Even so, I recall the duel I recently witnessed to be a dignified and cultured affair. Though of course, somewhat less... showmanship, one might say, than I would be normally accustomed to. And of course, all of the wagering could be considered somewhat crass."

"Tut. Back-alley hooligans." Umbridge spits. "It's a sport of unwashed vagabonds and vandals, even if it takes place upon a stage in front of a thousand wizards howling for blood."

Flitwick looks like he's going to pop in his vexation, or perhaps turn entirely inside out as some deep-sea creatures do when agitated, but he is distracted as the Inquisitor makes a move for Snapes wine.

A number of things become clear in very rapid succession. First, the bottles are both open and, with a perfectly innocent look on his face, Snape happens to shift his hand against a pair of bumps in a pocket. The tips of corked vials poke out, revealing that he's already taken samples... more than enough to work with, and granting the subtle illusion that those larger bottles have been drunk from.

Flitwick seems the first to realize this as well, as Umbridge's hand closes around the neck of a bottle, and suddenly he is all smiles. The wide, anticipatory smile of a shark, and it only takes a moment to mentally superimpose points onto gleaming teeth to recall that, yes, you can recall mention of Goblin heritage. And for all that the goblins of london are employed as bankers, the books which reference them all agree that they are a culture of proud and savage warriors.

McGonagall purses her lips in disapproval, but rather than speak up she lifts and places a single bon bon in her mouth, and slowly begins to chew. It is Trelawney, in actuality, who begins to speak as madame Umbridge transforms a discarded wrapper into a wine glass, and is silenced by a motherly smile and friendly tap on the shoulder and slight shake of the head from the Hufflepuff head, Sprout, seeming to urge without words that the Inquisitor be allowed to make this error in judgement without interference. The divination instructor quiets down, but still remains uncomfortable.

The rest of the room remains neutrally silent as Umbridge remarks something about having a taste for the brand, and drinks.

A heartbeat passes, and then the woman begins to look uncomfortable, and then sweat. And then the cup falls from limp fingers to shatter against the ground as she clutches at her mouth but fails to prevent fluid from gushing forth noisily. More starts to leak from her nose and ears, and ooze from her eyes.

"Oh dear. I seem to have forgotten to put those away after collecting samples. How... careless of me." Severus says, dryly, as Umbridge drops to her knees and heaves wretchedly again.

"... Yes, a most unfortunate accident." You agree, thoughtfully.

"Never to worry, dears." Sprout bustles. "There's always one or two incidents like this towards the start of the year with my badgers, where someone eats something that doesn't agree with them. Never any real harm done, of course, Poppy always puts everything right again, but the little angels come away with a little more respect of personal property. And perhaps, a little more averse to taking things they ought not?"

"Speaking of madame Pomphrey." McGonagall says, stiffly. "Perhaps we should see to delivering the good Inquisitor into her care and keeping?"

The gathered assembly of witches and wizards give this due consideration.

"Well, if it were in the term and something like this happened we'd summon the Prefects to aid her there." Flitwick points out. "I recall that is exactly what we did back when the Weasely twins... well, you'll recall, Rolanda, I seem to remember that you were unfortunately the one to fall victim to that particular jape."

"Yes. Unfortunately, I do recall." Hooch replies shortly. "... It was a particularly trying experience."

A loud, drawn out noise sounds, and grimaces appear around the room as a foul odor makes its appearance.

"Well, someone has to get her there. Summon the caretaker, if you would, Filch is more than capable of sorting this out."

"Severus I am surprised at you. You know full well that the poor fellow is a Squib, are you really going to ask him to handle..."

"I hardly see anyone else jumping to volunteer."

Of course not. Step out, and there's an opening for the other instructors to take advantage of, and place someone with all the worst possible time-slots as they scuffle verbally over the others.

"Yes, my good woman, just a moment and be patient if you could." McGonagall says, not offering much attention. "Really, Severus, is it that great of a chore to assist the poor woman to a healer?"

"If it's not much trouble, I see no reason you could not escort her there yourself, Minerva." Snape almost-purrs. "After all, I am afraid that I am... what was it? Ah yes, a black-hearted knave entirely devoid of any capacity to feel sympathy for my fellow man, I believe it was?"

This is all terribly amusing, you're sure, but the steadily intensifying stench is beginning to give you a headache. At least a couple greenish tinges to faces seem to agree with you.

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. -[X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey.

That way we can solve both problems at once. We can't have her contaminating the room any further, but nobody wants to be absent from the planning either.

We should also write a note with a quick explanation of what happened, just for the sake of propriety. Of course we don't need to give any details, we'll just make sure to tell Mme Pomphrey that Umbridge has unfortunately imbibed some substance of a toxic nature and has fallen ill as a result. As for how to cure her, we leave that to her expert hands. (We could tell her about the poison and give her some idea as to what it is, but that would make Umbridge's recovery quicker and we're in no hurry to have her back.)

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. -[x] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. Go only for the best two options.

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. - - [X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey. - - [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. Go only for the best two options.

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. - - [X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey. - - [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. - - - [X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[x]Create a portal to send Umbridge to the infirmary, along with a brief note explaining why. -[X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. --[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

If we can find Diagon Alley without knowing what country it is in, surely we can find the castle's infirmary from within said castle.

Wait...alternate idea.

[x]Open a portal to Eientei, and send her through. For a poison as severe as this appears to be, one should have only the best doctor...

[x]Create a portal to send Umbridge to the infirmary, along with a brief note explaining why. -[X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. --[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[joke]Open a portal to Eientei, and send her through. -[joke] Leave a note,that she is not to leave the building until you say so (gets her out of your hair for a while) -[joke] Leave a second note, in japanese, addressed to Tewi instructing her that umbridge may be messed around with.

This is just too funny, if only we could do it without cluing her in on gensokyo/pissing off Ran/getting blamed for her disappearance. Having he stuck in erintei, served by rabbits (who she will see as inferior) at Tewi's mercy (who will not like Umbridges racism one bit) can only end 1 way, utterly hilarious with a good chance of a repeat of the centaur scene with rabbits instead.

Real vote: [x] Minor wood spell to waft that oder in another direction while the others finish their little debate. If someone else has to leave, good for us.

[x] Opening a window might help. [x] If it doesn't and the others can't come to a decision regarding the matter, portal her to the infirmary. - [x] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. - [x] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[x]Create a portal to send Umbridge to the infirmary, along with a brief note explaining why. -[X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. --[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[X] Could we possibly get a Favor out of Umbridge for promptly getting her to the infirmary? -[X] If so, ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. Or do it if her presence becomes more repugnant than you can stand. --[X] If possibly, open it beneath her to catch as much of the mess as possible. Be a bit more gentle if you are getting a Favor out of this (aim for a bed). [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. -[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[X] Could we possibly get a Favor out of Umbridge for promptly getting her to the infirmary? -[X] If so, ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. Or do it if her presence becomes more repugnant than you can stand. --[X] If possibly, open it beneath her to catch as much of the mess as possible. Be a bit more gentle if you are getting a Favor out of this (aim for a bed). [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. -[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

>>58696Well, as long as Umbridge is there, it wouldn't do much good. She'll just make a mess again.

>>58688We don't want to send anyone to Gensokyo. Both because Ran will get on our case again, and because we don't want everyone to know just where exactly it is. That would just lead to problems. Also, asking for the direction to the infirmary is more of a formality. We could just send her anywhere we'd like without asking where it is, but it's more polite to ask directions from the other staff than just sending her there. Besides, since Umbridge is not in any mortal danger we can't let haste get in the way of proper etiquette, now can we?

>>58694Eh, a Favor is kind of a big deal. That would make us look bad. (We're basically extorting her for "do one thing for me, no questions asked and you may not refuse" just to help her to the infirmary. Then she'd probably rather drag herself there on her own.) Then Umbridge (and by extension, the Ministry) would have something against us personally rather than just being the new teacher who happens to be in their way. Of course, nothing says we can't use it as leverage in future negotiations, or when just asking for a regular favor. But a Favor is just a bit much.

>>58691Just leaving her until everyone else has finished arguing (or waiting until it's clear that they won't) might be fun, but I think it's better if we help her immediately, or at least without waiting any further, rather than giving her a reason to resent us personally by showing that we could send her there whenever we felt like it, but didn't just because.

This isn't just about giving Umbridge a hard time for being... Well, I can just sum it up as "being Umbridge". It's also about politics. Since we're currently an unknown factor in Hogwarts as well as British Wizardry politics, we want to avoid needlessly antagonizing anyone until we know more. Currently Umbridge might resent us and Snape (and the other teachers, too) for letting her drink the wine, but she can't really do anything. If she tries to complain about it, all the teachers at Hogwarts are witnesses to how she blatantly took anything that caught her interest, without being given permission or even asking for it.

Okay, she deserved to learn a lesson about ownership and proper etiquette. She's vomiting her guts out and leaking strange fluids from her ears and eyes. Lesson learned. Everything from now on is just petty cruelty and that reflects poorly on us, not her.

We can port her to the infirmary easily enough, and then get this schedule business sorted out by the end of the day. After all, it would be a pity if this dragged on for multiple days and the poor Madame Umbridge had to oversee them without being fully recovered. It's a kindness to her, and considerate, really.

[X] Could we possibly get a Favor out of Umbridge for promptly getting her to the infirmary? -[X] If so, ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. Or do it if her presence becomes more repugnant than you can stand. --[X] If possibly, open it beneath her to catch as much of the mess as possible. Be a bit more gentle if you are getting a Favor out of this (aim for a bed). [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel and discuss time slots. -[X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. - - [X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey. - - [x] Open a damn window - - [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. - - - [X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

>>58704Because, frankly, it's a stupid idea. If we let her die (probably won't happen, the poison was supposed to be nasty but not life threatening), we're looking, at the very least, at charges of anywhere between manslaughter up to premeditated murder. Not to mention how much trouble it would bring to Hogwarts. Patchouli might not care much about the school but she cares about getting paid, and being the (indirect) cause of a death, and a rather horrible death at that, on school grounds isn't exactly the kind of things an employer looks for in a teacher. Even if, unlikely as it may be, Dumbledore would forgive us for poisoning someone and leaving them to die you can be sure that the Ministry will have quite a few opinions on the matter. Yeah, they probably can't do much about it but "not much" is still more trouble than she's worth. And if Dumbledore doesn't forgive us. Remember that he has been to the mansion and can probably find his way back. Remilia is a friend, but she probably won't hesitate to kick us out if we drag a small army of angry wizards to her doorstep.

Besides, if we don't, someone else will eventually take pity on her (or just get fed up with the smell) and drag her off to the infirmary. I just think we should do it ourself (with a quick portal) to move things along, and gain some subtle headway in local politics while we're at it.

>>58705WTF are you talking about? Manslaughter? Murder? We are exactly as responsible as every other person there. In fact Snape is the most responsible as he is the owner of the poisoned wine and the one who opened it and left it lying about. Any minor retributions for failing to help (which is NOT a very common obligation and unlikely to be present in wizard society) would have to fall on the entire faculty (though mostly Snape) and that's just implausible. The whole sending (how would they even get there? Phoenix (which would be killed by Ran soon enough)?) an army of wizards over even a deliberate murder (let alone an accident that we are not responsible for) is preposterous.

I had forgotten about the non-lethality, but I think just ignoring her and keeping the smell away and thus forcing someone else to take her and lose out on teaching slots is the best option. Taking her to the infirmary ourselves gives us nothing (Umbridge isn't going to be grateful) while letting someone else do so gives us a slot and maybe even puts her in the infirmary longer.

>>58706Well, it was a hyperbolic example, but the point remains the same. If she dies (which she fortunately won't), people will be very upset. And they'll keep us responsible. We are actually more responsible than anyone but Snape. (Not intervening is not as bad as being directly responsible for the situation.) And he can shift the blame to us if he wants to. He has political connections here, we don't.

I'm not saying Umbridge will be grateful if we help her. But she'll resent us even more if we leave her.

Man, this quest was a treat to read, but I fell behind, and now I don't have the time to catch up and compose a well thought out write-in to fight against the inane dumbassery that's currently running rampant. Sorry, Kahi.

>>58714She'll resent Hogwarts and it's teachers. Which will lead to her piling shit on everyone, including us. Sending her to the infirmiry now would let us clean up the mess, get on with the meeting and while she will resent all the teachers for the poison, she won't have reason to be extra spiteful as she would if we just ignore her. And if we're the one to help her, we're likely to get bottom priority for the shit-piling, so once she's done we'll at least have one of the smaller piles. The other teachers can be reasoned and negotiated with, Umbridge can only be redirected to go bother someone else. (It's like Settlers of Catan. You can trade with other players while the Bandit will screw over anyone who's tile he's on, but he can be moved around to make sure he at least doesn't screw over you.)

Let's look helpful as if we had nothing to do with this. Innocent as a newborn babe, that's Patchy.

[X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. - - [X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey. - - [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. - - - [X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

Nevermind what Patchy does seems to have a history of not pulling her punches, that might be going just a bit too far - the instant transportation on the school grounds is a feat of absurd magical prowess which you cannot conceal in any way. Besides the fact what such a feat, now and here, might be a bit out of reach, and its not like teleportation is the only option.

>>58722From what I remember, most of the teleportation blocking is meant to keep people from teleporting to Hogwarts. Kinda the same as the Hakurei barrier, once you're actually inside it doesn't really do much.

And besides, showing off a bit would go far towards making sure everyone knows that we're not to be fucked with. And then that knowledge will eventually spread to people who might actually have a reason/desire to do so.

Although, is it really showing off if you don't even consider it to be anything worth mentioning in the first place? (Which, of course, only emphasizes the point that we are not to be fucked with.)

Patchy has repeatedly not cared about the use of teleportation before, as long as it didn't disrupt the barrier. You could already consider it common knowledge that she can do this; why start caring now?

We get rid of a major source of disruption, and supposedly 'help' her out.

[X] Act helpful (etc) [X] Ask for a more precise location of the infirmary and then create a portal to send Umbridge there. - - [X] Send along a short letter explaining the situation to Mme Pomphrey. - - [X] Then, continue with the arrangements for the duel a discuss time slots. - - - [X] Point out that finishing today may be a good idea after all, lest Umbridge may grace the group with her presence tomorrow.

You scribble out a short note as someone mentions perhaps summoning elves to handle this, which is thoughtfully countered by another instructor wondering if the castle elves are all present at the moment, it still isn't inside the official term dates yet. Conversation dickers back and forth over whether they probably-are or probably-aren't available to be summoned, and at no point does anyone actually move to summon them.

You almost wish they would, or that at least someone would cast air-freshening or cleaning spells. Or open a window. Though, considering it's one of those stately iron-barred and set in place thick and solid windows, opening this one would obligate destroying it. It could be repaired, of course, but this would probably not be the most immediately wise course of action.

Particularly not when you have other options.

"Exactly where is the infirmary?"

Snape offers a slight smile at the question, that a subtle glint in his eye casts as anything but friendly.

"Why... are you volunteering, then?" he drawls, voice coloring the word with a slightly unpleasant tone, and then offers a series of directions.

They seem arbitrary and at times circular and nonsensical, and picturing how he describes the twists and turns, the ascending and descending staircases, and how to take the third left and second right, then vice versa... yes, you have no doubt that it will lead you to the infirmary, but you also do not doubt that it is far from the swiftest route. Far indeed.

But then, it is hardly as though you intend to walk that distance.

Instead, you move the tip of your focus in a slow circle, before prodding the exact center with a sharp thrust, having not particularly considered in depth what movements might be best for this, but instead working slightly off of intuition. In the end, a great deal of magic considers symbolism as extremely relevant.

And so, symbolically creating a door and then knocking, in order to open it.... yes, somehow it seems to function more efficiently than before. With barely a sound or flicker, an aperture opens between the here of where you are and the 'there', of your target.

On the other side, what must be madame Pomphrey peers curiously through, only to tut at the mess on the floor.

"Oh my." Flitwick chirps, hopping up onto the table to get a closer look at the portal. You allow yourself a moment of insufferable smugness.

".... Fascinating." He mutters. "Of course. The swiftest way between two points is often held as being a straight line, but that isn't how apparation or floo travel work at all. Still, it only makes sense. Yes, just move both points so that they overlap. Excellent. I think I shan't ask whether you simply refrained from invoking the incantation in order to keep it to yourself, or if the development is simply incomplete, as it appears to be perfectly functional whether it is indeed complete or not."

Your smugness dies an immediate and frustrated death.

Still, it's not like you can complain. You demonstrated a magical working to a room filled with other competent practitioners of the arts, indeed, instructors and the next best thing to proper scholarly researchers and arcane investigators themselves. It would have been foolish to expect them not to immediately pick it apart to see how it worked, either to duplicate some portion of the theory behind it, or to set up preventative measures against it. This is just how the mind becomes wired, after enough time.

"Bypasses the wards against apparation. I have always pointed out that those particular sets of wards are needlessly specific." Snape snorts. "And, of course, was proven correct not long ago. I will say again: reworking that aspect to prevent all forms of magical travel would-"

"Pah. Ye'll never get the vote for it." McGonagall snorts. "I'll grant you, it's a bad state of things when a portkey can be tampered with in such a manner, but the best you'll get is to add them to the list of proscribed items, and between that and how tricky it is to get a legal one in the first place, there shouldn't be any trouble. And Severus, you hardly think anyone is going to be pleased about having their personal Floo shut down? People complain long enough for just regular maintenance, and that only lasts a day on the outside."

"Hm, you know, this would be terribly useful in the greenhouses." Sprout says, thoughtfully rubbing a lip. "There's a number of flora that simply don't last long outside of fairly specific conditions, and transporting them at all is-"

"Piffle, that's as simple as a pair of boxes and a variation on the switching spell." Flitwick chuckles. "... Though I should hope you aren't referring to greenhouse number-"

"Yes, yes. As it so happens, madame Umbridge here appears to have ingested something which very much does not agree with her." You interject loudly, other conversations politely dying down into softer tones around the room, and pass the message through. All the more pertinent details are included properly. "I hope that you can see to her proper care?"

"... Must be some kind of a record. The students haven't even arrived yet, and the Hostpital Wing is already being put to use."

Pomphrey sighs, then with a twitch and movement of her wand the Umbridge woman lifts off the ground and passes through the portal. Once clear, you close it off and... one of the less prominent instructors, you can't quite recall which one she is.... no, Burbage, that's correct, causes the remaining mess and smell to simply vanish into nothingness.

For a moment, you consider if you might be able to wrangle recompense for this... but no. It is, at times, difficult to tell exactly what will cause a Favor to become owed. It is hardly an exact science, and the same situation exactly, only involving different people, can and has provided different outcomes. In general, the only sure way to invoke one is by mutual agreement between two parties where, under a given set of conditions, a Favor would be owed in one way or another. But both sides of things must functionally understand the importance and implication of a Favor, and agree. There is, of course, some room for varying levels of coercion and deceit to potentially force or trick a victim into agreement... but, in the end, that is a questionable and uncertain subject indeed, requiring a soft touch and bearing no guarantees. Otherwise... sometimes, saving a life or offering willing and unrequested aid towards a purpose can, rarely, leave the other side owing a Favor. More commonly, however, it invokes a Debt. Which is of course another thing entirely. Indeed, frequently, this results in nothing whatsoever and leaves the good samaritan involved in the effort with nothing but potentially-meaningless gratitude.

In the end, a Favor is closer to a fae Bargain than anything else, though still not quite the same, not in the finer details.

Still. No matter. As idle chatter dies down, the negotiation begins in fullness. Everyone has their own special requests, little adjustments, they would like this or that, but in turn someone else wants that or the other, or possibly this one.

Much like yourself, everyone wants the best available time slots, but have a back-up possibility or two that they can easily bring themselves to accept.

Well, with some exceptions.

Astronomy, for example, could in theory be taught by casting accurate illusions inside at any time of day. In practice, however, it is always held at the top of a tower, in the dead of night, never mind the little brat's complaints about being tired in the morning. As such, there is little competition for astrology time-slots. Similarly, the flight instructor, madame Hooch, really only teaches first years, with some rare exceptions, and so she generally just picks a slot later in the year that would normally be called a free-study period. Neither really has any reason to be here, they don't outright admit but freely shrug to without complaint, beyond collecting gifts from the new Defense instructors.

Well, to be fair, you would show up like clockwork yourself if the situation were reversed. That's just obvious.

Them aside....

The main power structure between teaching staff seems to be the Gryffindor and Slytherin heads against each other. Mostly, to be fair, due to their intense personalities clashing against each other, each going out of their way to make sure that, first, their own position was as strongly supported as possible. But also that, second and nearly as important as the first, that their opposition was as crippled as they could manage, to the degree that they accept slight hits to their own position provided they are outweighed by greater blows to the other side.

The Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff heads display no shame whatsoever in taking advantage of this, and 'siding' with Snape, in Flitwick's case, or McGonagall, in Sprout's. With this team-up...

It's not really personal, it seems. There doesn't seem to be any of the honest hatred that would bring bared knives, quiet curses, or silent doses of slow poison to bear. It's just... automatic and ingrained malevolence of the sort that comes of two parties having been in a state of enmity for so long that, even with a deeper understanding of each other, and with no personal grudges, they cannot think of any other mode of behavior than that of an enemy.

It's the rest of the instructors that form the third, more neutral power bloc, headed by Burbage, as the most forward and sharp personality to head the united spear. Grubbly-Plank, being no more than a temporary substitute, holds little personal stake in the matter and so mostly stays out of the deliberation, alongside the astronomy and broom-riding instructors. You suppose you can't really guess at where the instructor she is filling in for would place himself in the scale, just yet.

Hm.

Well, you have a number of options set before you, to tell the truth. Three distinct outlines are taking form, through the arguing and discussion. It just depends where you choose to throw your weight.

The first is to ignore the private power struggle between lion and serpent, and instead back the neutral bloc. Overall, it seems the most level-headed of the decisions. It gains you little in the way of gratitude, but it does not make you enemies either, and the slots for first and second year students are very good indeed. However, in turn, fourth, sixth, and seventh year slots occupy less enviable times, immediately before lunch or dinner. In the end, it is the even spread you intended, having one class per day.

The other two options are to back either the roaring lion or hissing serpent, rather than cautiously stay out of a conflict where you might find yourself bitten or maimed. Naturally, whichever option you side with will net you some reasonable good will from your allies, but of course comes with the cost of vexing the other side. You have no doubt that this will, at least to some degree, spoil relations in that regard.

In any case, both sides have their good and bad points even leaving that aside.

Backing McGonagall leaves you with the first and second years on the same day, but in relatively good positions, and sixth and seventh again but in poor ones. This aside, fifth year also holds a good time-slot, and you would have Tuesdays free, as a concession to taking multiple classes on the same day.

Snape, by contrast, includes three days of double classes, including a good slot and a poor one, and the next day not holding anything of particular note in the time slots. It seems a reasonably rational spread, with a period of intense work on your part, followed by a more sedate cool-down day, and then you have extended weekends off entirely for personal matters.

Naturally, if you side with either Snape or McGonagall, the other will be forced to accept more classes in less-preferential slots. And as far as exact times goes....

Hm. There are pros and cons to any of the three available choices. Making your own...

... it would be a hard sell, you think. And it may extend this discussion by... at minimum, another two hours or so. Everyone seems by this point that they would be, well, if not 'pleased by', then accepting of any of the given schedules, though they wildly vary in course times. You pay no particular mind to the specifics of other courses, of course, your own is the only one currently relevant beyond making concessions for support.

Though you do note a clear and marked avoidance of weekends. Or possibly an attempt to keep them free in case of situations arising that require class rescheduling? You note that the only times you've gotten on the weekends are poor ones, and possibly by design, to keep the good slots free for weekend emergency-classes.

It's possible that you might manage something brazen with the weekends, at that, if only because it frees up more official slots of time during the week to be squabbled over... hm, but would it be worth it? Certainly, if you were unfortunate in regards to your health, it is a greater risk, and yet also....

You do not have much time to consider the matter, of course. There are still quiet arguments and hashing out of exact details, but the state of your classes seem to have been more or less locked down on the options displayed on the schedules which have not been scrawled over so many times as to be entirely illegible, or crumpled up and cast aside, or burned.

-----

[ ] Option A: Noncommital Newbie. An even spread across the week, a fairly balanced option. You won't stand out much with this, speaking in a school-office politics sense, but you won't make enemies. Whether you will make any friends in the effort is a question that is less readily answered.

[ ] Option B: Weekends off is fairly nice. But you'll have to deal with two sets of the youngest and most miserable whelps in a single day. As well as two sets of the elder, surly, and hormonally frustrated in the wake of puberty teen children, and in poor teaching slots too boot. This aside, is it wise to cross a man with an extensive understanding of and familiarity with poisonous substances?

[ ] Option C: A three day weekend is even better, but compounded with three days of relative suffering. Your patience will no doubt be sorely tested through this, and you won't likely be winning friends in the face of McGonagall's quick temper. Not to mention that cultural opinion, for whatever stupid reason, seems to hold the Lions in higher esteem, and the house of Serpents are eyed with some distaste.

[ ] Option ?: Thinking outside of the box may find you in possession of a brilliant masterstroke that solves everything neatly and at once. Alternatively, it may be discovered that reaching into an unknown will find you withdrawing a fistful of filth rather than buried gold, or even bitten for your efforts. Consider wisely. [Write-in?]

[x] Option C Poor teaching slots can be compensated for depending on our attitude and teaching program, if we put the fear of Patchy in the students little black hearts then they won't dare screw up or be inattentive in our class, same if we pitch them against each other. Having a disciplined class can only help on bad days.

We also need sufficient time off to take care of any surprise caused by either Yukari, Remy or any other pain in the ass...

While having to deal with first and second years as well as sixth and seventh years on their respective days aren't optimal, we would have Tue, Wed, and Thu free all afternoon. And unless Patchouli is so sick she can't get out of bed, even with medicine, powering through a morning on pure willpower and then resting the entire day after that shouldn't be a major problem. That way only Mondays and Fridays are in any real danger of being disrupted by Patchouli's illness.

As for the school politics, we would have to pick a side eventually anyway so I'm more concerned with our teaching schedule right now. But Snape does not dislike us after our little gift (and "does not dislike" is as good a first impression you can make on Snape) and while he does take particular interest in poisons he is still the Potions teacher so he would have quite a lot of knowledge of more helpful potions too, probably only rivaled by Pomphrey on the subject of healing draughts. He could probably help us with some sort of "energy drink" if we have a bad day for one of our morning classes and we absolutely can't miss it. Sure, crashing from that will likely be hell but we'll have the entire day to recover anyway. And if the day really is impossible, I'm sure Snape would be more than willing to sub as a DADA teacher. We could also cement his position as our ally by promising to recommend him as our replacement when our term here is up. He's been trying to get the position for years, and having the recommendation of a previous DADA teacher would probably please him greatly. (It's not as if Patchouli cares about what happens at Hogwarts after she's done here. Hell, it's not as if she really cares what happens even while she's here as long as she gets paid properly.)

McGonagall on the other hand is a Professor of Transfiguration, a subject in which I can't see such an immediately obvious advantage for us, and even if the Gryffindors are regarded in a slightly more positive light than Slytherin it's not as if there's any major differences. They are first and last among equals, more or less. (Personally I think it's because of the Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy Hero/Rival roles in the books. Of course the Hero's House is the best, and of course the Rival's House is the least upstanding one.)

Besides, even if it was a formality we did get sorted into Ravenclaw and siding with the head of "our" house isn't the worst we could do.

I wonder if there are any potions or spells for giving the students energy and increasing their ability to concentrate? I believe there are muggle drugs that do so (nootropics). That would turn bad slots to good ones.

>>58756Personally I think we'd be better off just blasting lethargic students with low-power danmaku. We should probably practice that first, though. Bruises would be the absolute worst we'd want to inflict there.

The problem with Option A is that there are classes on the weekends. The times themselves are pretty average, with two slots directly before lunchtime, and two slots directly after. Correct me if I'm wrong, here, but classes on the weekends are not the norm here, and if I was a student, I'd absolutely hate having class on either Sat or Sun, and would have trouble concentrating. As for the political standpoint, we don't have much to gain here. Or much to lose. It's the safe but boring option.

Option C isn't too bad, except that we have to teach two classes a day for most of the week. With our luck, we'll either have a shitty health roll and won't have the energy to teach, or maybe one of those portals will be found and cosmic entities from across the cosmos will start pouring in and we can't go and stop it because we have to go teach kids who want to be here even less than we will. Now, I'm not familiar at all with the Potter universe, not having seen the films or read the books, but I'm pretty sure Patchy isn't much of a Gryffindor, anyway. In siding with Slytherin, we'd have to deal with enemies that we would probably make naturally with our lack of respect for their prized courage and our general lack of morality.

I think Option B is the best choice, here. The class times aren't terrible, trading one before-lunch for one after-lunch, and most of our classes in the morning, leaving us with all day to do whatever the hell we want. Of course, for two of those days we have double lectures, but you can't win 'em all. Politically, we already have some clout with Snape and if he still has any influence here, Lucius, since we've met with them before. As such, we can take the small hit to approval with them by siding with Gyffindor for this situation. If asked, we just mention that the class times were better for our needs. Besides, it's not like this is going to be our alignment for the rest of our stay here. It's just to determine our class schedule... right?

They all have pros and cons, but I'm with...

[x] Option B

I just want to get to the teaching already. I'm itching to start slapping some stupid kids around.

[x] Option C The schedule seems to be the most orderly. Having the older students in less preferable timeslots should be manageable. An extended weekend also tends to be useful. Besides, we seem to have already left somewhat positive impression among the members of this faction. There's also the fact that our personality likely aligns better with either faction C or possibly A than B.

Option A, we lose out on full days without classes. We've already seen that creation of custom homunculi requires our full attention for a day, and it seems likely that there are other things which might take a day or more to do.

Option B and C are both better for us by that metric, though they will get politics involved. At the moment, our stance on politics is neutrality, though as pointed out we're probably going to make a few enemies among the Gryffindors anyway.

With option B, we get free weekends in exchange for a few double classes, and mediocre slots on average.

With option C, we get rather poor slots for the upper years, relatively good slots for the lower years, which more or less evens out.

If we make use of assistants (demons to grade, Koakuma to do lectures on the bad days or for the upperclassmen, occasionally just setting the students against a group of fairies or golems or Rumia), the burdens of teaching and our illnesses ought to be lessened a fair bit, especially if we have time to prepare things.

I'm going to try to figure this mad puzzle out in time so I can answer with option D.... yet...

You know, hogwarts schedules are weird, because they are mathematically impossible. Especially with only five slots per day. I've looked up the amount of periods for each year for each course as much as possible.

It's not so much that the students can't fit the time required in, but rather the teachers. To see a clearer picture, consider this:

[x] Regardless of option picked, Attempt to use your role as kingmaker to upgrade a timeslot or 2 with a well-placed swap.

If all sides are around equal before we intervene, we decide the winner. this is a powerful position to be in as we can make demands in exchange for our support and anything but accepting has the definite risk of us siding with someone else and denying them their entire timetable. The details depend on who owns what slots (as trying to swap with someone who doesn't own that timetable will be annoying and may drive them into the hands of another and negating our advantage)but it shouldn't be hard to squeeze out 1 concession if we ask the right person.

Politics wise it makes us appear strong-willed and pragmatic which should lessen any opinion damage so long as we don't annoy people further (after all we were acting on our interests, not taking sides). Our gains are also less then a full support but that is not as major a loss, no doubt we can gain rep to make up once term starts proper.

I'm pretty sure teaching 2 houses per session is common,if not the norm, times 7 years that's 14 lessons per teacher. Post-OWL classes are also more selective and so the possibility of further mergers exists.

Unfortunately it turned out unreadable (you could technically reconstruct the roster from the data yet that becomes a bit cumbersome, because both 0-letter, 2-letter, 3-letter, and 4-letter acronyms are used). I can't seem to delete the above post, possibly due to an issue with passwords involving non-alphanumeric characters. I'm re-including the file in this post, as well as a link to the original .ods file.

-- Note: A great deal of care and thought has been put into all these rosters. First, I looked up values for the amount of lessons per subject per week for each of the school years, making guesses where this information was unavailable.

Then, the task was to find out all of the teachers for each of the subjects, some teachers give multiple subjects!

And finally, the rather large puzzle of combining everything. Note that I've tried to do multiple things to please students and teachters:

- Give the department heads good slots for pupils of their own house when possible.

- Combine optional subjects in logical ways that allows any combination of two of these to be taken, and most combinations of three.

- Make sure the teachers can physically teach the student schedule, and the students can physically follow it.

- Try to give double or triple-hours to subjects that really like them (potions, herbology, charms, and some others) and vice versa (especially history of magic double hours are bad).

- Prevent dual or triple hours from extending beyond lunch/dinner as much as possible

- and so on and so forth.

^^ Patchouli would with her intellect of course come up with the whole thing in 10 seconds and present it neatly with some magical cantrippery instead of my 10+ hours of fiddling and cumbersome spreadsheets that are hard to understand for non-mathematicians. Please feel free to ask questions!

Days are 5 period per day. If you can't work with that, then all that work has no point. Pretty sure No one will be interested in teaching/studying after dinner and there is no way Patchouli has the influence required to have this pass.

I am extremely tempted by Option C in terms of scheduling, but for the fact that teaching requires substantial preparation. Having two classes per day is likely to be exhausting and often involve at least one mishap that consumes additional time. A single class per day should give us ample time to grade student work, prepare lesson plans, arrange for the importation of guest lecturers and hostile creatures, and so forth during the portions of the day when we're not actually teaching, rather than leaving us needing to resolve an entire week's classes and then prepare for the next set during our supposedly free days. Much better to spread the workload out evenly, I think.

Lacking entire free days is somewhat annoying, admittedly, but there's little to be done about that. We should be able to arrange for a teaching assistant once in a while when we need a day off, hopefully.

>"In any case, given that you're here, I suppose I can use you to assist in outlining schedules." You decide.>"Hm, that? Well, two main options to go for there." Alistair says. "You can scatter all the classes through the bulk of the week, have two or three classes a day, and whatnot, like most instructors do. Or you can follow in the lead of old man Brunswick, who was more of a hands-on teacher... he would just pick one day a week, march the entire student body out onto the grounds, and then divide them into groups and have them sling spells at each other all day. 'Practical group duelling lessons' he called it. I think he was just taking advantage of the house rivalries to get the students to study on their own time, since they would have a chance to use it against the others every week, and then he could just play referee and eat lunch one day a week, and do almost nothing for the rest. Sadist of a man, he started bringing in dangerous creatures as practical experience... ended up getting torn into pieces by a chimaera he'd had shipped in to pit against the seventh years. Recieved some small award post-mortem, though, his students did unusually well on their defense exams."

I'd prefer a mix of this, possibly bringing in opponents for "practicals" on some kind of bi-weekly/monthly/bi-monthly status

Is it easy to cancel and reschedule something? or rather guarantee a changable slot that allows the second sort of thing every once awhile?

As an explanation as to why there's six days with six periods per day needed::

For example, snape always teaches two houses in his potions class. In the books he even does it to the 6th and 7th years but I've taken the liberty to merge these classes (there's usually a minimal amount of NEWT students following potions, and for that matter any course, anyway. Students average about 3-5 NEWT classes so those aren't as much of a concern). The class is mandatory. Counting up all the contact hours using a reliable source for the amount of hours per week leaves you with a roster of 36 hours for him. (maybe that's why he's so grumpy?) How can one put 36 into 5 per day? You cannot, even if you teached on sundays. In the books both sundays and saturdays are off, so even going saturdays is a bit off canon. But canon HP does not actually specify the amount of hours per day. On the wiki it actually varies per year too to construct the schedules. 6 days with 6 periods is actually the minimum required to make things work, so I went and rolled with that. I also put up a small list of where to timetable those 6 lessons; and it fits with the curfews, the last lesson ending 30 minutes before curfew (8PM for the first years).

Maybe there's some error in alistair's information regarding this.

Snape has a full roster (36 lessons). Flitwick has 35. Sprout has 32. McGonagall has 30, Vector has 26. We have 25 with the extra lessons, but only 19 without. Burbage has 22. Babbling 19. Hagrid and Trelawny have 16. The other teachers have less than 20 too. I've managed to give McGonagall and hagrid a free day despite this, and trelawny 2 (perhaps as recompense for the poor timeslots she gets)

This is caused by three factors; the first being that the hogwarts' curriculum includes many contact hours for students; usually about 20-25 per week plus any optional courses. The second factor is the problem of only one teacher per course. With two teachers per course you could try to squeeze the roster down much further.

6 periods with 6 days as an aside would also make hermione's crazy optional subject selection (take EVERYTHING) work.

To read out that master table >>58785 , simply know that there's 6 days with 6 periods each. So period 21 is the 3rd period of the 4th day, which translates to 12:00-13:30 on thursday.

>>58787 contains information on what abbreviations mean what in the timetable, e.g. POT = potions, TRF = transfiguration, and so on.

>>58786 is a 'teacher's table' that works using the same principle. The abbreviations in it are simply the first class the teacher has to teach at that time slot. Note that there's always additional houses to teach. 6th and 7th years classes are always 4 houses, as are DADA classes and flitwick's 2nd year classes. Sprout combines 1st years with 6 and/or 7th because she has multiple greenhouses. The full gist is;

Professor :: What do do with 1st till 5th years Snape:Combine gryffindor and slytherin. Trelawney:Combine gryffindor and ravenclaw Flitwick:Combine all houses for the 2nd year, and combine gryffindor and ravenclaw otherwise Patchouli:Combine all houses Sprout:Teach the 1st years and 6th /7th years together, except for the 4th extra class hour for the lower classes. Combine gryffindor/slytherin Sprout has two separate greenhouses, which is why she can do this. The older students should know what not to touch! BinnsCombine gryffindor and slytherin Sinistra:Combine gryffindor and hufflepuff Hooch:Combine gryffindor and hufflepuff Vector:Combine all houses, but two time slots (divide students evenly, depends also on other subjects chosen). For Advanced Arithmancy, combine all houses, single time slot. Hagrid:Combine gryffindor and hufflepuff Babbling:Combine all houses, but two time slots (divide students evenly, depends also on other subjects chosen) Combine gryffindor and ravenclaw for Magic Theory Combine all houses for ancient studies Burbage:Combine gryffindor and hufflepuff Clubs:Student-organized things (magical music / art) Unknown:Ministry appointed instructor for apparition

Notice how instructors have house combinations that will make them happier. For example snape would like gryffindor/slytherin, while mcGonagall would most definitely not.

In summary:: I did my research. There's no point in demanding 25 slot weeks when this is mathematically impossible. The student's rosters can do with only 25 periods, but the teacher's rosters will not allow it. Unless you suggest time-turners for most of the major subject teachers or deviating from the curriculum there is not much of another way out. You could possibly compress the length of the lessons from 5x90 = 450 minutes per day (as stated by alistair) down to 6x75 minutes (one hour and fifteen minutes) to still have 450 minutes of teaching per day (7 and a half hours) and not expand this to 540 (nine hours), which enables you to fit everything before dinner. Of course you could also fit one more additional class before dinner instead; but this would probably be a very bad time slot.

The general structure of the roster remains the same with these modifications though. It is rather heavily optimized and NOT compressible any further. So please do the math before requesting the impossible and relegating stuff to the dust bin.

I'd just like to point out that Option A's weekend classes are for years 6 and 7; we could probably get away with low attendance requirements if we set enough study material for them to pass their exams, and just run the classes for troubleshooting/dueling/real-world tactical combat simulations, and have periodic testing to make sure they're studying properly.

Something like, for the first month, attendance is mandatory. At the end of the month, we test them. Nothing major, just enough to see if they've been paying attention. If more than 75% of them pass, make attendance optional, but beneficial. If too many fail, we go back to mandatory attendance, thereby ruining everyone's weekends forever. Repeat the process every 4 weeks.

This motivates them to help their classmates pass, which will be useful for both the Hufflepuff (gryffindor pls halp) and Slytherin (gryffindor pls go) students. Gryffindor, obviously, will be caught between the two, leaving them insufficient time to get into too much trouble, while Ravenclaw will happily watch from the sidelines, content with getting more Knowledge than anyone else.

>>58800Dude the 'Kahi format' was just for Patchy's class, I understand that you made a lot of work to schedule the whole of Hogwarts and I basically don't have the time to look at it and understand where and when our classes are.

>>58757>>58760It's not just motivation, it's actual ability to concentrate and retain information. Zapping kids isn't going to help if they literally cannot concentrate or if they forget something soon after "learning" it (and distant punishments can have very little effect on a child's behaviour). Magical or muggle nootropics (racetams are good I've heard) could dramatically increase our student's learning ability even with good time slots. It's worth the effort to investigate.

Students need motivation to study, yet patchouli needs results to show her students more advanced magic. We need to lay the first egg and give the correct hints and stimulation for students to really commit themselves to the pursuit of (k/K)nowledge.

If we are truly in need for guidance on educational methodology, standards and best practices, our best logical option resides in a certain ms. Kamishirasawa, historian and teacher at the local human village. It depends on this person's attitude towards us a great deal whether or not this route is worth pursuing.

While her methods of discipline which possibly involves cranial combat amongst other things will be less relevant, additional auxiliary instruction technique expertise may prove valuable. A visit may very well be worth considering when we happen to find ourselves spare time.

From what she said last time, Keine has no real advices to give, a best bet would be Lupin, but even then it's been made pretty clear that Patchy will only do what is required. Every time Patchouli even think about sharing her hard earned Knowledge she almost get ulcers!

The students will learn to handle themselves in a fight and the curriculum of spell, that's it as far as I'm concerned and the will to succeed will come with being beaten by inches tall fairies, or being put up against monsters.

You know, I have no idea how to read that giant roster list, but just because of the sheer amount of work put into it, I'll change my vote (here >>58755) from "Option B" to [X]Huge-ass schedule writein

If there's a tie involving Option B, that isn't B vs writein, you can move my vote back to B for tie-breaking.

>>58757I wouldn't be so sure. Gensokyo has a higher overall power level, but in certain specific circumstances, the HP-verse is way ahead. Like the Time Turner. This is something that's comparable to Sakuya's Luna Dial. (It doesn't allow precise control of time and space, but on the other hand it allows you to be in two places at once, or to return to a previous moment in time with your current knowledge and actively meddle with the past. Sakuya "only" has total control of the present.) And this little trinket is considered normal/harmless enough that it was okay to hand it to a student who wanted to take several classes simultaneously instead of telling her to just take summer classes like you'd normally do.

Although, Gensokyo has Eirin so anything Snape can cook up would be like "Baby's First Potion Kit" to her... So yeah, potions aren't really something to care about but HP still has some unique things that Touhou doesn't.

That's actually a pretty bad example to argue your case with. Snape could probably make an philosopher's stone. While not granting perfect reincarnation along with eternal life, the stone no doubt represents a significantly advanced form of Alchemical Science. At the very least equal to that of the standard mixtures from the moon.

Concerning the Time Turner and Luna Dial, I think they might not be so different. I believe that it is entirely possible that they share the exact same power source, whatever that may be.

Which is to say that, as long as one has the base material, let's call it the Sands of Time, you could,with a little research and development, create any number of trinkets that all affect time differently. Who's to say there isn't a room full of "Luna Dials" in the department of mysteries?

Also, Time Turners are not seen as normal or harmless. They are a highly secretive and controlled item loaned only to extremely trustworthy people who have a genuine need/application for them.

>> 58800 It's possible to make a small 'improvement' by switching 5th years monday's first two hours and move 2nd years' history of magic on monday one hour earlier, allowing patchy not to have to combine 5ths EX and 6th normal class in that giant custom schedule. Does put one more (optional) hour into patche's schedule.

>>58827If snape was able to make a philosopher's stone, why would Voldemort need to steal one in the first book? I thought it was pretty obvious that the philosopher's stone was basically impossible to make.

Pic related, but whenever I try to comprehend the monster write in I start feeling dizzy and anemic. I keep trying to push back through it again, just to get a lock on when Patchy's classes are supposed to be, and I get lost right away.

So, uh, good job?

In any case, I'm aware that about half the classes offered are actually not on the table for the first two years of students, and that after OWLs the Newt classes only occur in the last two years for those students that qualify, and so keeping in mind that yearly class schedules might change so extremely that...

... Well, the options I gave were incredibly over-simplified because aside from in a very general sense, the exact time frame of when other classes are happening and when there are free periods, it's all actually not particularly relevant beyond who likes you a bit more and a bit less.

Moving to classes, I don't know if Ghoul Studies is... Is it an actual class in canon? It's... in the wiki. Huh. ... On the basis of being labeled on the map, and never hinted at in the books, movies, or... anywhere else, I guess?

Well, among other classes that I'm not sure whether actually exist or not, or if they're just blind ghosts lecturing to empty rooms or teaching ghouls proper grave-robbing procedures or what have you, doesn't really matter. Comes down to it, the doodled time-tables in the pic aren't completely accurate either, there could and should be a slot immediately before yellow-breakfast, and possibly one more after red-dinner, I only drew it that way because that was as far as relevant things went for your classes.

Anyway.

It looks like it's tied between A and C at the moment, so I guess next vote for either of those calls it?

>>58833Yeah, there has only ever been one confirmed creation of a Philosopher's Stone in HPverse. And it's now destroyed and the person who made it is implied to be dead by now, or at least will be very soon. (Dumbledore said that he would have time to "put his affairs in order" and then he would die. And that was a few years ago.)

It is the HP equivalence to the Hourai Elixir. Only one person, who is considered a true genius, has ever succeeded in creating it. And with that person gone, it would probably take centuries of advancements before anyone will get even close to making another one, barring a new genius. Snape is well educated (as a teacher should be) with a natural talent for potions, but he's no genius.

I'm going to try to convert the table into something more readable and understandable for all parties. I'd really be sad if that Anon's work all went for nothing, I really enjoy the idea that a well executed plan with effort bears fruit.

Some quick takeaways, Canon HP /has/ 6 periods per day. Breakfast, four periods, lunch, break/free-time, two periods, long break/free-time, dinner. Each period is under an hour (the bell chimes every hour when the next set of classes begin).

If we're going by what Kahi set as this universe's canon, my apologies but it's been a while and I don't want to go back digging through, so I'm just using the wiki.

There are... problems with the classes as presented in the custom setup and if we follow the periods as shown. I doubt Snape is going to want to do Triple Potions with First Years (Three hours on Mondays for Gryffindors and Slytherin? Someone is going to get killed. Double potions is bad enough, let alone the idea of triple).

Or do double potions /with a break between/ as it's doubtful the potions can be left to idle that long, and the point of double potions is for the longer brewing stuff (if you have a double period set up between Periods 4 and 5, lunch is between those two with a break in there as well).

There's an amount of 'handwaving' that we're going to have to do here, because it's very true that it may not be logistically possible to make everything work out, but the custom schedule has a number of very odd flaws in it currently:

(This is without the swap mentioned in the reply later, but mostly because at this point, I don't think it'll matter).

If you consider that each of the seven years met with a professor for two periods a week (a single 'double' sitting of a course) that would be 28 of the 30 periods right off the bat, let alone splitting them into smaller groups (G&S/H&R what have you).

And I can't imagine the Professors would ever want even more of their time spent expanding the workweek into Saturday (you'd immediately gain several enemies, the only person /for/ it would likely be Umbrage because she'd think it would be better for everyone to work harder and screw around less, both students and staff).

The day by day thing (Mon-Sat) is finished but I don't think we gain anything for it and if anything, in its current implementation it would seem to set us at a disadvantage.

That roster indeed does not assume breaks between periods 4-5 and after 6, but between 3-4 and 5-6, as stated by Kahi in one of the early topics. To make it work with different break schedules the entire thing would need to be remade most likely. The construction used kahi's description of the school schedule, not the description from the Half-blood prince.

It's not really that terrible that it differs from HP canon by the way (the source of the scheduling is from book #6), schools often change their scheduling around. As an example I've personally experienced three different class lengths (in minutes) in my own secondary school experience, and two different schools of thought in scheduling. (more daily classes vs. longer periods of the same subject).

Is either alternative better? And how does that apply to wizardry of all things? I don't know, and frankly neither would any of the hogwarts staff. The wizarding community is simply too small and too busy actually practicing magic instead of statistics to do any kind of decisive scientific study.

Even human researches have begun to document the effects only recently (from the 1990s onwards). The results are generally that for most subjects block scheduling has positive results. For example refer to http://bul.sagepub.com/content/89/642/3.full.pdf+html. As you can see the results are not statistically significant. The study uses 5 schools (about 6,000 students) and to be reasonably certain of its claims you would need about 3-sigma worth of significance. This particular study has a Standard deviation of around 10.5 points using 6,000 students with an increase of around 5.5 points observed in scores.

So please, continue your work at making a diagram that's more pleasing to the eye; SCIENCE is always fascinating.