The brief to brilliant writer Toby Whithouse was just this – a hotel: make a hotel scary. All those corridors, all those identical rooms, those bleak and soulless bars and waiting rooms, that tinkling muzak – surely all that was made for Doctor Who, where the scariest things of all come bleeding through the ordinary world.

If you’ve seen Toby’s wonderful Being Human, you’ve probably already decided he’s a sick and twisted man. Doctor Who is delighted to confirm this simple truth for a BBC1 audience. (Oh, and do you have a ventriloquist dummy lurking somewhere in your house? Just asking, no reason…)

Episode 12: Closing Time

Writer: Gareth Roberts

Director: Steve Hughes

Guest stars: James Corden, Daisy Haggard

The Lodger was a surprise hit of last year’s Doctor Who. It was a simple tale of a barmy Time Lord in a flatshare with a nice man called Craig. Except when you say one of them’s Matt Smith and the other is James Corden, then frankly you’ve got enough going on for a whole other series. I leapt at the chance of a sequel and writer Gareth Roberts leapt at the chance to take up his story again.

Events have moved on in Craig’s life when the Doctor turns up on his doorstep for a second time; there’s a terrible alien threat, of course, but never mind that – dear God, there’s a BABY!

And here it is at last – the episode with all the answers, as the Doctor journeys to Lake Silencio for his date with destiny. While I was writing this, my wife asked me, “What happens?” and when I frowned, and pondered my answer, she hurriedly added, “In one sentence. Quite a short one.” I thought a moment and said, “The Doctor goes to his certain death – and it doesn’t work out as well he expected.”

So welcome to what is, without doubt or serious competition, the wedding of the year! Early reports indicate that it could make On Her Majesty’s Secret Service look like a fairly successful honeymoon…