Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I was excited today; my wonderful, funny, honest blogger friend Lynn the Autism Army Mom was guest blogging at my other wonderful, funny, honest blogger friend's blog, Big Daddy Autism. These are 2 people I've met in my new role as Mom Blogger who make the whole thing more fun than I ever thought it could be, and now they're teaming up in one place? LOVE that! So, I was happy to wake up this morning and rush to my computer (or, drag my ass out of bed, make coffee with my eyes closed, wake up a kid or two and then drag my ass to the computer) and see what they had come up with.

Lynn had written a great and, as usual, funny piece about being anonymous, or in her case not being anonymous, as a Mom Blogger. I had lots of (not necessarily even snarky!) things to say on the subject and I scrolled through the comments to get to the bottom so I could say something, when I saw this, written by "Ann," an anonymous commenter.

There has been recent press about when the stars of mommy blogs grow up. Some kids were ok, some weren’t. It isn’t a risk I want to take — my children deserve some control over their lives. Shaming them in public is not something I want to do. Even if it doesn’t seem so bad. Maybe it seems ok now because your child is so young…but I have older children, and even a simple photograph can bother them. It’s all a matter of who matters the most. You, or your child. Do you respect your child or not? Do you have integrity or not? What purpose does it serve to put your child out there without the child having informed consent? This isn’t like making medical or educational decisions. Worse, since autism leads to so many social problems, why intentionally harm your child’s social life? Why make them even more of a pariah then they may be in middle school and later? Especially since it seems you have no qualms with your child’s behavior in public, and the example your blog sets shows that you have no filter yourself. It is at best, thoughtless. At worst, you can cause your child’s social life and self esteem some hard core damage, even if she were neurotypical. What rationale do you have for abusing your child like this? Need for attention? Or an inability yourself to understand social rules in our society?

Yeah. That just happened.

Okay, I'm not going to get into the crux of her "argument;" about anonymity or whether or not Lynn has respect for her child or is an actual child abuser, I think that's been done pretty well by Stuart Duncan, or by Lynn's classier blogger friends in the comment section there. I'm also not going to talk about the term "pariah" and how it makes steam come out of my ears and how much I want to fucking kick Ann in the crotch for even suggesting it (she's obviously a "normie.") No, I'd like to talk about the basic lack of respect that people seem to have for each other, particularly if they're protected by the anonymity of the internet. Or, in a nutshell: What the fuck kind of person does this, Ann?

There is nothing that annoys me more than a person who sits in judgment of another. Somebody who lives with the belief that what they think is correct and if you disagree with them, you're wrong. It doesn't matter what the topic is, it can be anything, but if you're unfortunate enough to bump up against these people, they will not hesitate to let you know about how wrong you are, and that you're a bad person for thinking what you think. I fucking hate people like this, and the internet brings them all out in droves. For the most part I've learned to avoid them by staying away from places that attract people like this, but when one of them shows up in the comments section of my friend's blog, well, apparently there's no avoiding it.

So, listen up Ann, although I'm sure that's not your real name because you're too much of a fucking pussy to use your real name. The world is full of people with all different kinds of opinions about things and we don't always agree, in fact we rarely agree, but it takes a special kind of asshole to anonymously criticize somebody on a personal level as you have done. I know you won't stop what you do, though, and I know all the other people like you won't stop, but karma is a cruel bitch and at some point SHE will kick you in the fucking crotch for this, on Lynn's behalf, and you will deserve it.

Just in case Ann finds this post (I doubt it, though) and wants to comment, I've turned off anonymous commenting, because if you're going to be a fucking bitch on the internet, at least have the ovaries to use your name. And, for the record, I use my real first name here (and a shitload of personal information) but I don't use my kids' names or show their faces because my husband has asked me not to. This is his life and these are his kids, too, and I respect his request for anonymity. Personally, I don't really care that much, but he does, so that's why. Besides, as one of my Twitter friends said today "And, please, as tho our kids wont be blogging about us."

Lynn says she's retiring from guest blogging but I've invited her to guest blog here, so look out for it! Because, Lynn, don't let the haters get you down!!

Now Ann, you better be some kind of a big deal to be as sanctimonious as you came off to be. I just think it's a bit too hypocritical of you to be going around judging someone's blog when you probably spend so much time lurking in mommy blogs yourself. Having said that, your kids better turn out to be the most altruistic and perfect do-gooders because God forbid they fall short of your delusional expectations, I'm sure they're bound to blog about how much of a pariah you are.

It was all I could do to be mature in my response to her...no need for that here right? HA. You're right about people being all sanctimonious and judging....I think the two topics that bring it out the worst are politics and parenting. People have this need for CONTROL...it's not enough for them to believe something, they need everyone else to believe it too and if they don't they will shove it down their throats.

When I wrote on the same topic a couple of months back I ended by saying that if Audrey was ever teased over anything in this blog I hope that she would start a blog called "Typical Classmates That Are Douchebags" or if she was mad at me she could start one called "Let's See How You Like It, Mom" where she makes like The Hoff's daughter and posts embarrassing videos of me. Turnabout is fair play and nothing would make me happier!

Two more things:Tina is awesomeI'm working on that guest post

Thanks for this post and for defending my....I was gonna say honor but who am I kidding?

I saw this yesterday when catching up with the posts (waves at Big Daddy and Lynn). My first three thoughts were 1)Troll 2) how judgemental and 3) her kids. That is all I have to say, otherwise this will end up as a post too :) Jen

I am judging you for you use of kitten videos. I find the practice absolutely abhorent. How dare you embarrass those kittens like that? One day there will be a feline uprising and you will be at the top of their list.

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Who the hell do I think I am?

Snarky, profane Mama to 2 boys: Child 1 is autistic and Child 2 OMGISN'T. I write about... stuff. Sometimes. Other times I write about other stuff. A lot of the time I don't write anything at all. Sometimes I draw really bad and stupid pictures. I'm not just saying that, I mean, they are just awful.