Legendary Hoboken Club Maxwell's Can Be Yours For $625,000

When it was announced back in June that Hoboken's venerable venue Maxwell's would be shutting its doors after a long, impressive run, you could hear the hearts of aging punks across New York and New Jersey breaking. The only reason to ever go to Hoboken had ceased to exist, its 35 years of live music memories now just that. It gave up the ghost on Wed., July 31st. Cause of death: rising rents and "a changing nightlife culture where high-def TVs are valued over live rock 'n' roll," according to booker and co-owner Todd Abramson. Yo La Tengo were placed on suicide watch.

Well, good news-ish. Maxwell's has now been listed on the commercial real estate market. It can be yours for $625,000.

Of course, that money doesn't get you the physical building, just Maxwell's liquor license, fixtures, furniture and equipment, and a 10-year lease (with a five year option). Still, not terrible. Oh, wait. It's in Hoboken. Maybe pretty terrible.

Our trusty abacus tells us a 20-percent down payment of $125k will get you a payment of $2,315 a month on top of rent (which is $15k, according to the local Coldwell branch). Coldwell Banker's Mortgage Calculator backs that up. If you and your friends decide, after throwing back a few dozen Coors Banquet tallboys while listening to an old copy of Out of Step, to go in together on a 3-percent down payment of $18,750, your monthly will be $2,807.

Here are Maxwell's key selling points, according to the listing:

Maxwell's - One of the most recognized bar/restaurants in New Jersey with its iconic corner location. Approx. 3,400 SF including an ample basement. Sale includes liquor license and all F.F.E. 10 year lease with 5 year option.

If there's one thing everyone knows, it's that Maxwell's--despite bringing in stellar talent for three and a half decades--never utilized their "ample basement" effectively. Throw a couple for-pay Foosball tables down there next to the ice machine, and this thing becomes a license to print money. Or so we imagine Jon Taffer would say.