This Week's Leaders in Chit Chat

Officiants

I was hoping some of you ladies out there can help. My fiance and I are getting married next year at Fireside Tavern in Strasburg, PA. We are having an outdoor ceremony there. Do you know of any non judgemental officiants? My fiance would perfer that the pastor is a man. So that eliminates a lot of officiants. Neither one of us currently attends church. I would 2 jobs and have my part time job Sunday mornings so that makes going to church very difficult. We want someone who will marry us and not judge us for not attending church. We are both good people. We are also willing to do counseling with this person as well. So any good recommendations would be appreciated.

Re: Officiants

I was hoping some of you ladies out there can help. My fiance and I are getting married next year at Fireside Tavern in Strasburg, PA. We are having an outdoor ceremony there. Do you know of any non judgemental officiants? My fiance would perfer that the pastor is a man. So that eliminates a lot of officiants. Neither one of us currently attends church. I would 2 jobs and have my part time job Sunday mornings so that makes going to church very difficult. We want someone who will marry us and not judge us for not attending church. We are both good people. We are also willing to do counseling with this person as well. So any good recommendations would be appreciated.

Thanks:)

1. You should post this on a local board.

2. Why does your fiancé want a male officiant? I can't think of any reason that's not, well, sexist. Which is judgmental in and of itself.

I do know that anyone can be an officiant - my dad was for my cousin's wedding - after going through a certification online. Maybe there's someone that you know who could get certified to officiate your wedding.

I do know that anyone can be an officiant - my dad was for my cousin's wedding - after going through a certification online. Maybe there's someone that you know who could get certified to officiate your wedding.

This isn't an option in PA. OP-many brides in the Lancaster use the "marrying Mayor" Rob Green. You can also google Unitarian ministers, they are a very open church and will officiate any kind of wedding, religious, non-religious, no judgements. Many of the ones I saw in Central PA were female though.

I do know that anyone can be an officiant - my dad was for my cousin's wedding - after going through a certification online. Maybe there's someone that you know who could get certified to officiate your wedding.

This isn't an option in PA. OP-many brides in the Lancaster use the "marrying Mayor" Rob Green. You can also google Unitarian ministers, they are a very open church and will officiate any kind of wedding, religious, non-religious, no judgements. Many of the ones I saw in Central PA were female though.

Confused by the bold....I think this is certainly allowed in PA. Pennsylvania is one of two states (CO is the other) that allow a bride and groom to legally "self-officiate" (meaning they are the only ones who have to sign the marriage license).

What this means in practice (since most couples don't want to do all the talking during the ceremony and like the idea of a person up there directing things) is that whoever you want can stand up front and be your "officiant". Then when filling out the marriage license, you and your new H are the only people who sign it. I was married in CO where this is also legal, and we had a friend be our "officiant", but she played no legal role, according to the state.

OP, look into self-officiating/self-solemnizing and see if your county is 100% ok with this (wikipedia mentions some counties are difficult unless you are Quaker...). If this is ok, then yes, you can have a friend or family member officiate your ceremony.

Confused by the bold....I think this is certainly allowed in PA. Pennsylvania is one of two states (CO is the other) that allow a bride and groom to legally "self-officiate" (meaning they are the only ones who have to sign the marriage license).

What this means in practice (since most couples don't want to do all the talking during the ceremony and like the idea of a person up there directing things) is that whoever you want can stand up front and be your "officiant". Then when filling out the marriage license, you and your new H are the only people who sign it. I was married in CO where this is also legal, and we had a friend be our "officiant", but she played no legal role, according to the state.

OP, look into self-officiating/self-solemnizing and see if your county is 100% ok with this (wikipedia mentions some counties are difficult unless you are Quaker...). If this is ok, then yes, you can have a friend or family member officiate your ceremony.

-------I self- united in PA, so I am well aware of the self-uniting option. I was speaking to the fact that PA does not recognize online ordinations. OP specifically was looking for a male officiant so self-uniting does not seem like something she is interested in.

All PA counties are legally required to provide self- uniting licenses, no matter your religion, however there are a few who refuse to administer them at all, and others that will falsely tell you that you need to be a Quaker. Also in PA you can obtain your license from any county, so it would not matter whether the county where the wedding takes place 'recognizes' self-uniting licenses.

Confused by the bold....I think this is certainly allowed in PA. Pennsylvania is one of two states (CO is the other) that allow a bride and groom to legally "self-officiate" (meaning they are the only ones who have to sign the marriage license).

What this means in practice (since most couples don't want to do all the talking during the ceremony and like the idea of a person up there directing things) is that whoever you want can stand up front and be your "officiant". Then when filling out the marriage license, you and your new H are the only people who sign it. I was married in CO where this is also legal, and we had a friend be our "officiant", but she played no legal role, according to the state.

OP, look into self-officiating/self-solemnizing and see if your county is 100% ok with this (wikipedia mentions some counties are difficult unless you are Quaker...). If this is ok, then yes, you can have a friend or family member officiate your ceremony.

-------
I self- united in PA, so I am well aware of the self-uniting option. I was speaking to the fact that PA does not recognize online ordinations. OP specifically was looking for a male officiant so self-uniting does not seem like something she is interested in.
All PA counties are legally required to provide self- uniting licenses, no matter your religion, however there are a few who refuse to administer them at all, and others that will falsely tell you that you need to be a Quaker. Also in PA you can obtain your license from any county, so it would not matter whether the county where the wedding takes place 'recognizes' self-uniting licenses.

That is in fact true as I am also a Central PA Bride!

to the OP I would look into Mayors or JP's that can preform the ceremony for you! Also I am jealous of your location...