Individual and group peer support for men who have experienced sexual, physical and psychological trauma. Groups are open to men after they have met a peer support facilitator for one to one meetings. Call David Passell on 021 174 9252 or 09 889 2553, email manager@betterblokes.org.nz

Auckland Peer Support For Male Survivors of Trauma

Better Blokes Peer Support Groups are weekly meetings of men recovering from the affects of childhood trauma-:emotional ,verbal, physical and sexual abuse facilitated by a man who also has experienced childhood sexual trauma.

The meetings are held in three Auckland locations: Henderson , Three Kings and Papatoetoe. There is one Northland meeting held in Whangarei.

The number of men that can be accommodated at each peer support group is limited to eight.

A support group of this nature needs guidance in order to achieve its goals and to help members understand how the group works. All members joining the group must agree to the following guidelines, although the guidelines are open to modification. The guidelines of the group are as follows:

• No comment to another man’s sharing during or after the meeting unless he asks for feedback, or unless you ask and he says yes to feedback.

• The support group is not an “open group”. Anyone wanting to attend will first speak with the contact person.

• Confidentiality must be maintained. No names or identifying information about members can be used outside the group.

• Anyone who, as an adult, has sexually abused a child cannot attend the support group.

• Alcohol or other drugs are not to be consumed immediately before or during the group meeting. Cigarette smoking is not permitted inside.

• Members may not discriminate against each other and to the best of your ability give acceptance to each man’s: –

• In this support group there is no dominant race, culture, sexual orientation, belief system or spiritual practice.

• If you want to offer comfort to someone please ask how they would like you to show that support. Avoid uninvited physical contact.

• Meetings will start on time.

• Sexualised contact with the other members during the life of the group is to be avoided.

• No violence between group members.

• Members will take responsibility for themselves, their opinions and feelings by using “I” language. Generalisations about other groups or individuals in the community should be avoided where possible.

• Members unable to attend should inform a facilitator or another member beforehand.

• Any contact outside of the group, including phone calls, is mentioned at the next meeting to avoid secrecy.

• For the safety of the group there will be no admittance to this support group after 8:10pm.

• This is a sharing group – not for raging or screaming. Sharing about angry feelings is welcome here. If you need to do cathartic work with anger, this can be done outside of the group.

• If you feel a guideline has been broken please say “Guidelines” and we will have an open group discussion.

• If conflict arises between members during a meeting that is proving difficult to resolve, each man will be given an agreed time (5mins) to express their views without interruption or comment from other members. At the conclusion of this round members will indicate as to whether the meeting can continue as per the meeting plan.

• You may leave a meeting at any time but be aware a facilitator will contact you at the conclusion of the meeting to check on your wellbeing.