Science Officer Ben, here. Several hard-light-life events and a few vectors of nefarious strife have conspired to impede, but by no means halt, our progress in preparing our most recent recording for broadcast. We Defenders take very thorough measures to distill the podcast into the purest mirth money can fail to buy.

To paraphrase Bob, whom I have just this minute appointed Imaginary Spokesman for DOTM,

“Episode 22 IS on our minds. It will be made. We assure you it’s something we have considered and approached. We do not want to rush it. We have nothing but the utmost respect for it and it’s fan base. It will happen!”

Errant apostrophes and slight irrelevance aside, I wholeheartedly echo the spokesman’s statement and its sentiment. I am personally working on the final edit and it shall be hitting your eardrums very, very soon. There is a rigorous training regime, to which Johnny alluded on bookFace, required for me to take up the full weight of this responsibility. Part of this, as I have interpreted it, is to do penance for a late podcast.

I have decided the only way to atone correctly is to embarrass myself on YouTube. As luck would have it, me from five years ago prepared a little something seemingly for this very purpose. Happily this leaves me free to continue the editing.

Here it is: Ben’s Debut in Videography: First Runs

Well, that’s my future career in politics out the window. Ah, I’d have been a tyrant anyway.

I aim to be broadcasting in the very early coming week. If I fail, James’ll have to crack out the old cat o’ nine tails. (He swears it was on the station when he first arrived).

So it’s been a while since I updated you with the current situation. As you heard on Episode 18 the Defenders are back! They are still having some technical issues and broadcasting shall resume again shortly.

So what happened I hear you ask. Well after I got used to have a 2 arms and 2 legs again I was able to rescue Ben from his module, it was locked from the outside which was rather strange. When we went to find the other 2 they were still in their sleeping capsules with James’s netbook still playing his playlist of porn on a constant loop. Before waking them we noticed that their sleeping time had been increased and they were not supposed to wake for another year! After waking them we discovered that all other systems were functioning normally and they got to work on sorting a transmission.

Due to Mir only being able to sustain 3 bodies, here I am, back on my desk typing with my mind and flying the shuttle ( Celica 1) back and forward from Earth. I like my desk, having a body was just to much effort and people made you go get things and carry stuff for them! So I’m happy controlling things with my mind from my desk.

Look forward to reading your thoughts and I hope you enjoy the return of the defenders.

The bed post above would like to say sorry for the lack of an episode 19 after our beta test pre-launch show. Technical difficulties with the recording set up are to blame this week; and the bed post, while not responsible for these difficulties, feels that it should take on the responsibility for any upset or inconvenience caused. Sorry folks but, once issues are corrected, expect great things… Or, at least, mildly satisfying things!

Crazy things have happened since my last post. During the turbulence my jar was getting rocked back and forward. It made me kinda dizzy but the next thing I know I am in a drawer, my jar pressed onto a red button with the label ‘do not touch’……..whoops!

Anyways, not all bad. It must of been one of the Science Officer’s experiments. Before my eyes this device started to create a body of light. It was a sight to behold, I’m not to sure why it produced a female body……

So here I am, a week later standing beside the desk that was my home. I think I have got used to the controls for this body. I may have lost a little water from my jar though.