This Just Hit Me Like a Ton of Bricks: My Godfather Does The Chun!!!

Well, I am pretty sure he is my godfather, since his wife is my godmother.

Today while walking my dogs in my usual fashion, my mind wandered off like it usually does when I am walking them, and I was thinking about all the Chun threads I had read here ad nauseum; how they all seem to be the identical cluster-**** of what lineage is better, how the chun can easily stop a wrestlers takedown, and how it can effortlessly block a boxers hook, etc.

This made me think back into my youth, when I thought karate and all that stuff was cool and could make you a badass fighter. Specifically, I was thinking back to when I first started Tae Kwon Do, around the age of 10, and how I was excited as all hell to be doing the karate stuff like in the movies.

From the start, I was already a biased bastard when it came to martial arts. I thought karate when compared to any style of kung fu (I thought there was only one type of karate) would always come out the victor, because, you know, they wore those awesome japanese uniforms and stuff, and they had blackbelts! Now come on, you knew as a little kid if a martial art had a belt system, especially one with a black belt rank, it was way better than a martial that didn't have one, right?

So when I started TKD, I was already impressed since they had the cool uniforms and a belt system, and since it was TKD, I learned that they focused on kicks more than most karate styles. As a kid, you knew if there was more kicking in one martial art, that automatically made it better than the others!

Now you might be asking, "WTF does your starting off in TKD have to do with the chun?", but don't worry, I am getting to it.

So, the reason I started in TKD was as I stated earlier the fact that it had uniforms, belts, and lots more kicking than other styles. Before I started TKD, however, my parents were trying to decide what school I should go to for martial arts training, as I had bugged them about it for weeks.

"Well, your godfather teaches kung fu.", said my mother, at least that is what I thought she said. "Why not try that?" I said something on the lines of, "No way, Mom! I wanna do the karate stuff, cause it has belts 'n stuff!" And that's how I came to know TKD, since I didn't want to do that stupid kung fu like my mom suggested.

Anyways, for years I did TKD and never once thought of trying out kung fu, and still don't plan to try it out. As I progressed in my TKD, I also discovered judo along they way, and subsequently found bullshido shortly after starting judo. I am thankful I had found this place in such an important part of my life, when one starts developing either a critical mind, or a delusional one, plus the fondness of girls thrown in made it more interesting.

Anyways, when walking my dogs, I remembered when I had visited my godfather no more than three years ago, which I belive was at a party he and his wife were having for their eldest daughter who had just gradutated college. My family was invited, and like at most house parties I go to, I gravitated towards the location of the nearest gaming console.

So there I was in my godfather's basement playing Halo with his son and his cousins, when I noticed that one of the pillars in the basement had an unusual look to it. At first I had thought it was some weird modern art sculpture, or a coatrack, but my godfather's son was quick to see where my attention was at and said to me, "Oh! That's my dad's kung fu dummy. He uses it to practice his technique. He's a sifu, you know."

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

In hindsight, I could now tell that the dummy his son was reffering to was exactly like all of those Wing Chun dummies I see in the videos online. I couldn't think of any other style of kung fu that used that type of dummy except for the Chun. That's when I realised: My godfather does the Chun...

... and for years I was unaware to this dark secret.

I am now glad that I declined my mother's offer to try my godfather's "kung fu".

I need a shower.

Let your anger be like a monkey trapped inside a pinata; waiting inside, hoping that the children don't break through with the stick.

-Master Tang (Kung Pow! Enter the Fist)

A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice.
— Bill Cosby

Something with eye gouging and Shaw Brothers choreography ought to do the trick.

Post again after you've killed a stranger on the road in single combat.

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Something with eye gouging and Shaw Brothers choreography ought to do the trick.

Post again after you've killed a stranger on the road in single combat.

Fortunately, I can say I haven't killed anybody in single combat, but for the most part my story is true. No Shaw Brothers, unfortunately.

Also to add: About half an hour later of playing Halo with his son, said godfather actually came into the basement to get some things needed for a barbecue. For lolz, as Halo got boring fast, I began fucking around with the dummy.

He noticed and started talking to me about how he works his "kung fu" on the dummy, and the applications to "self-defense", or something along those lines of discussion. I can't remember a thing he said past that, but I am sure it was the usual Chun Mantra of chain punches and the keeping of the centerlines. Suffice to say I became uninterested rather quickly with his speach, and made a quick retreat to the backyard to take a whack at the pinata.

I wish I had brought a camera with me to document a Chunner in his natural habitat.

Let your anger be like a monkey trapped inside a pinata; waiting inside, hoping that the children don't break through with the stick.

-Master Tang (Kung Pow! Enter the Fist)

A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice.
— Bill Cosby

I kind of wish this thread was about The Godfather doing Wing Chun, just for the mental image of waking up one morning and finding a wooden dummy with a severed horse head on it in the corner of my room.

On a slightly similar subject, almost everyone in my father's family who does martial arts does TKD and have been since the 70s, with the exception of my father, my self, and one of my uncles, who does both TKD and GJJ.

It does explain my fetish for the tippy-tappy instep-kicking bullshit, though.

I kind of wish this thread was about The Godfather doing Wing Chun, just for the mental image of waking up one morning and finding a wooden dummy with a severed horse head on it in the corner of my room.

Oh My GOD!!! I could not stomach the Chun version of the Godfather.

I'll make you a chi sau you can't refuse...

Let your anger be like a monkey trapped inside a pinata; waiting inside, hoping that the children don't break through with the stick.

-Master Tang (Kung Pow! Enter the Fist)

A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice.
— Bill Cosby

At least I never took up the offer to train with him those many years ago. I could have turned out to be an even bigger tard than wingchunx2z, but with actuall experience in the Chun to boot! And of course, better grammar and punctuation use.

Let your anger be like a monkey trapped inside a pinata; waiting inside, hoping that the children don't break through with the stick.

-Master Tang (Kung Pow! Enter the Fist)

A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones who need the advice.
— Bill Cosby

At least I never took up the offer to train with him those many years ago. I could have turned out to be an even bigger tard than wingchunx2z, but with actuall experience in the Chun to boot! And of course, better grammar and punctuation use.

Chun melts your mind, your grammar would be far worse, the reason chun masters are never online is they are to damaged to find T3h interwebs