First, let's look at Romney's claim that you can't put a windmill on a car. You should try hiring some kids who can use The Google, Mitt, because a California team built a windmill-powered car called the Blackbird that not only uses a windmill for power, but proved that it's possible to travel downwind faster than the wind itself. And upwind, too, of course. You absolutely can put a windmill on a car. Generally, you wouldn't want to, but I think there's ways to get power from windmills to a car and everywhere else remotely. Since Romney seems to be a fan of coal, he can remind himself of this every time he doesn't see someone shoveling coal into a Prius. The "wires and batteries" idea works the same way for both coal and wind.

For Obama, he may have just meant it as a joke, but let's look deeper and assume his real motive was to suggest that Romney had experimented with dog-powered cars. That's been tried, too. Way more often than you'd think. In 1875 (Cynosphere), 1939 (Poochmobile), and even in 2008. What the hell is the matter with these people?

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So, Presidents and Candidates: leave the weird car stuff to us, okay? You two have fun fighting it out, and shoot us an email next time before you say anything car related, please. In return I'll maybe vote for one of you.