A splash pad of love

CHERISHED

But over the past year or more, especially the past few months, he has learned just how warm and deep the well of support can be as he works towards building a very personal but public dream.

His vision is a splash pad where families can come in the summer to cool off, have fun and take in the views of Lake Bernard where he and his wife Stacey grew up and fell in love.

And when Stacey died this past December of cancer Stillar set in motion the wheels to build his dream to honour her life and give back to the community he says has given his family so much.

“I knew they’d be supportive, but what is coming out of the woodwork is blowing me away,” says Stillar of the reaction he has received so far from the area. “People are lining up to help me but I literally don’t have enough jobs for them.”

The idea came to Stillar about two years ago not long after she was diagnosed with terminal liver cancer but kept it to himself, knowing Stacey wouldn’t want the fuss or attention.

“When she was sick people wanted to do a benefit dance and she said no,” said Stillar.

So this past January, he started laying the groundwork for the splash pad he hopes will be a draw to the village’s main park at the end of Paget Street with kids playing in streams of water in 2015.

But in the short three months he has been working on the project Stillar has moved that estimate up considerably with a tentative goal of hosting a grand opening on Canada Day of next year.

Already he’s sourced a local firm, McLaren Equipment, to do the excavating along with a start up company willing to install the pad for the cost of the equipment. In March he presented the plan to Sundridge council and has the municipality behind it.

“Basically it is, ‘You take it and run with it,’ ” said Stillar.

A different answer is hard to imagine considering the Stillar’s love story began in Sundridge about 30 years ago as a pair of toddlers attending Sunday School together at Zion United Church. She was Stacey Sullivan then, daughter of Jim and Laura Sullivan, the parts manager at Mac Lang’s Chrysler dealership and a local teacher. Jason the son of Terry and Judy Stillar, a salesman and heating technician, and her, a teacher, too.

They would eventually go to Sundridge Centennial together, he a grade ahead of her.

“It was Grade 10 I started courting her and we started dating when I was 17 and she was 16,” said Stillar.

After graduation he stayed in Sundridge working and she went off to Laurier University studying finance.

“At that point I was working at McLarens and the dairy and I would drive down to every weekend to see her,” said Stillar.

When she graduated he went off to college and they put off marriage until they were moved into a new house in Peterborough, 10 years after they started dating and in 2008 they welcomed their son Hunter into the family that still extended into Sundridge.

At the time of Hunter’s birth Stacey used the time away from work to go to teacher’s college to pursue her passion for working with children, already working with Big Sisters.

Getting into teaching wasn’t easy at the time though, and through correspondence school Stacey picked up her French certification and in 2010 landed a full-time job teaching in the Wyevale area, north of Collingwood.

But just as the good news arrived so did the bad. The chronic abdominal pain she had been fighting turned out not to be the gall bladder problem doctors had just finished surgery for but stage four cancer in her liver that had spread too far for a transplant or other aggressive treatments.

“They told us she had two years at that point,” said Stillar.

Stillar says Stacey didn’t let the diagnosis phase her and did her best everyday, showing up for her next day at work and remaining the strong focused woman he fell in love with years before while attending Almaguin Highland Secondary School.

“She looked forward and was strong and said she had a good life. It was more than I could ever have done,” said Stillar.

Though they were living miles away, he says they drew strength from the people of Sundridge who raised money quietly for them and never waivered in their offers of support.

“As much as we wanted and as much as we needed is what we got,” said Stillar.

The support has continued on after Stacey was taken by the disease on Dec. 13, 2012, which Stillar reflects on as he works towards the splash pad in her memory.

“I had been through it once before with my dad. It was another reason I wanted to do this to give back to the town that has helped me out. Stillar’s father Terry passed away a little more than a decade ago.

He’s also grateful for the upbringing he received in Sundridge, where his family isn’t the first to be lifted up in times of tragedy.

“It gave us our roots, our morals and our values, and taught us how to be good people,” said Stillar.

Those values are pouring into a number of fundraising events, the first coming on June 15 at a gala dinner and silent auction at the Sundridge/Strong Community Centre.

He says volunteers have flooded him with offers of help for everything from the dishes to the bar as well as an impressive list of donations for the silent auction That list will soon be on the website dedicated to the project with bids being able to be made directly there.

In the fall there are plans for battle of the bands type event featuring Pam Millar and Davey Meloy’s band Swamp Donkey who are offering to lead the show. Next winter an offer has been made from South River native Ryan Horwood to bring in a group of comics from the Yuk-Yuk’s circuit for an evening of laughs.

It’s been a very busy three months for Stillar who is back at work for Sysco Foods while raising his and Stacey’s four-year-old son Hunter.

“He’s struggling. It is hard for him. She was his mom.”

The park though has definitely grasped his attention.

“He thinks it is great. He’s saving his own money. If he gets a nickel it goes straight in the piggy bank,” says Stillar, thinking Hunter definitely picked up some of his mother’s money sense.

His efforts make him part of the family team working away at the project that also includes Stacey’s sister Susan and her husband Pat Archer who have set up and are managing the website splashforstacey.com, where people can directly donate to the project and soon will be able to bid on the silent auction items.

The group of efforts has Stillar confident the addition to Lions Park will become a reality sooner than he thought possible.

“To me there is no better way to honour Stacey. She loved kids and she loved to help out. She loved Sundridge.”