Tuesday, April 24, 2012

"Advanced" vs. "Old" Fitness

Lately, as in a few months ago, I have been changing up my weight routine to include more CrossFit style exercises as opposed the the weight-assisted machine style of exercise

I'll tell ya, my body responds really well to this type of exercise. In forty five minutes, I can get such a complete workout that I almost throw up twice and the next day my entire body hurts. Yes, Mom, those things are signs of a good workout.

What I find ironic though is how so many old things are now new again. Take this style of exercise for example.

In the gym on base, "they" have converted one of the racket ball courts into the "Advanced Fitness Program" room. Notice that this is "advanced", aka modern/new-and-improved, fitness.

Get a good picture in your head as to what "advanced" fitness would look like.

And I bet it wouldn't look anything like this.

Let me take you on a tour of the "Advanced Fitness Program" room. And yes, I did take pictures of the inside of the gym.

First, there are jump ropes for doing sporadic bursts of intense cardio. Also, there are medicine balls, circa 1976, good for throwing, tossing, dropping, and causing hernias.

Next are kettlebells. These are heavy, handled weights that simulate "modern" techniques of lifting using whole body momentum. They replicate such things as lifting heavy bags of grain (think Peeta and his bags of flour), hauling heavy armfuls of bricks, and guiding beasts of burden along side of a plow.

Can you see how "advanced" this stuff is?

Here are some weights that go on to the bar pictured below.

With this bar, and optional weights, you can do all kinds of "advanced" exercises such as the squat, straight-leg dead lift, and shoulder press. Think lumberjack "exercises".

This piece of equipment is highly technical. It's a bar. You hang on it and pull yourself up. Repeat.

And if you are not strong enough to pull yourself up and repeat, here is a tremendously "advanced" tool: A giant rubber band. After centering the rubber band on the bar, you hold the bar with both hands, put on foot into the loop of the rubber band, and then lower yourself down until you are hanging with straight arms. The rubber band assists you pull yourself up to the bar.

The rubber band was first patented by Stephen Perry of England in the most modern year of 1845.

Now, that you have a proper picture of what "Advanced Fitness" looks like, let's take a look at what the other style of fitness looks like. And assuming that the above was "advanced", and if this is in opposition of "advanced", then the following must be "antiquated", old, out of style.

Let's see what a normal weight exercise room looks like, an exercise room from the days of yore:

Here is a machine for exercising ONLY your shoulders.

This machine is called a "Smith" machine. With this you can multi-task and do exercises for either your legs, shoulders, or chest.

This machine is ONLY for strengthening your lats.

Leg press...

I don't even know what this is and I've been a gym rat for 18 years.

Yes, my friends, this weight room is obviously very antiquated, mundane, and the opposite of "advanced". Just ignore the Terminator walking around all of that metal.

In any case, I'll take my "advanced fitness" over that "old" stuff any day. Please excuse while I go bounce around on a giant rubber band!