Welsh language confirmed as a massive hoax

The Welsh language was just made up to wind up tourists, Wales has admitted.

Describing the hoax as ‘like crop circles only way better’, Welsh comedian Simon the Williams told reporters how he and some friends invented the language for a laugh one evening using a bag of scrabble letters with all the vowels taken out.

Since that night in 1983, the whole thing just took off, with most of the country joining in just to piss off people from Hampshire on driving holidays.

“You thought we were speaking a real language all this time”, said Williams, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes.

“It’s just run and run and run. You gave us money for it and everything.

“Jesus, you bunch of mugs. We spent it on beer.

“Or ‘Llogryllorhychach’ as we say in Wales”, he added before collapsing into helpless giggles again.

Tourists are left wondering what else about Wales might just be make-believe to wind them up, and questions are already being asked about Welsh cakes, Newport and Joe Ledley.

In the wake of the revelations, the BBC is looking into the funding of its other regional language services such as Scots Gaelic channel BBC Alba, which receives a huge budget and is run out of the snug of a pub in Dundee.