But Jen, you say, who doesn’t love a little bumpity-bump now and then, a little Frosty the Snowman and Christmas come early? What, you don’t like to party? And I say, Sure, if you like diarrhea of the mouth, a limp dick, and the persistent feeling that there’s a crusty booger hanging out your nose that you can’t quite get to all night, have your fun, man.

Known for: Co-writing and producing the most viral song of 2010, Cee-Lo’s “Fuck You”; co-writing and lending his smooth R&B stylings to B.o.B’s “Nothin’ on You,” which was nominated for Best Pop Video at this year’s VMAs, where Mars performed a “Nothin’ on You,” “Airplanes” and “The Only Exception” medley with B.o.B and Paramore’s Hayley Williams, a trio MTV billed as the VMAs’ “dream team” (watch a grainy version of it here); looking kinda dorky cool in a fedora.

Speaking of dreams, Hawaiian native Bruno Mars, who is of Puerto Rican and Filipino descent, has been steadily realizing his of late. After penning the feel-good kiss-off song of the summer and getting nominated for a VMA, the 23 year-old singer, who’s thus far been better known for his writing and producing skillz, will finally take center stage with the release Continue reading AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! Bruno Mars