Sunday, December 25, 2016

I have been composing an annual Christmas carol since 2001, when I wrote, "A Stable, a Manger, a Star in the Sky," inspired by Alfred Burt's lovely "Star Carol." This year, as I sat down at the piano on Christmas Eve, the phrase "Love Trumps Hate" was foremost in my mind.

Like many who lived through the U.S. presidential elections of 2016, I am afraid. I fear for my three sons, who will all be draft age during President-Elect Trump's first term. I fear for myself and my daughter, as we struggle to come to terms with the fact that we live in a nation that is still dominated by the patriarchy, a country where the highest elected official in our country can boast casually about sexually assaulting women. I fear for my students, many of whom are refugees who came to this country fleeing unspeakable horror, or who were brought to this country as children and now face the prospect of being forced to leave the only home they have every known. Most of all, I fear for our country and its promise of freedom, now subjugated to a twisted and evil white supremacist interpretation of Christianity that rejects the stranger and marginalizes the other. But love trumps hate, and love trumps fear. That is the message of hope we have at Christmas in 2016 and beyond. Merry Christmas! On a hillside in Judea On a silent sacred night Shepherds heard the angels singing And they saw the new star's light In a manger lies a baby Sent in love to all the earth. Let us celebrate our Savior And the wonder of his birth. God is with us still today. We can hear the angels say: Chorus He came for love! He came for love! He came for love of you and me. He came for love! He came for love! And his love will make us free. Now the world is full of hatred And the night seems dark and long. No one seeks the humble manger. No one hears the the angels' song. But the good news still can save usIf we only stop to hear. We must learn to love like Jesus, And our love will conquer fear.
(Chorus)

Thursday, November 17, 2016

In 1729, Jonathan Swift proposed a solution to
unplanned pregnancies. In 2016, I have a better
idea. One that does not involve cannibalism.

You and I don’t have much in common. I didn’t vote for you. But
you’ve suggested that you are interested in being a vice president for all
Americans, so I thought I’d share my thoughts with you. We both love America
and want the best future for our country, even if we don’t agree on the
specifics. From what I’ve heard about
you and your record, I do think that we agree on one thing: Abortions that terminate unplanned or
unwanted pregnancies are morally wrong.

As my progressive feminist friends fall off their chairs and
prepare to block me on Facebook, let me repeat myself: As a mother of four
beautiful children, I don’t think women should ever use abortion as a form of
birth control for an unplanned pregnancy. I’m not alone in this view; about
half of all Americans agree with me.

Now, we—stronger together—finally have a chance to end
abortions of convenience once and for all. We can ensure that no woman ever aborts
an innocent child simply because she doesn’t want the hassle of pregnancy and
child-rearing. Even better, we can also end unplanned pregnancies that result from
rape or incest.

We don’t even have to overturn Roe v. Wade to accomplish this miracle. Thanks to the wonders of
science, there will soon be a better way.

We will have to pass a new law though. To end all abortions
of convenience, we should immediately urge Congress to pass legislation mandating
male birth control. Under this brave new law, all males between the ages of 12
and 112 will be legally required to get regular birth control shots for the
rest of their lives. The men will only be permitted to stop taking the
medication, which by some accounts causes some pretty serious side effects like
acne, mood swings, and depression, when a heterosexual woman obtains a court order expressing her affirmative
consent to reproduce with a specific man, or alternatively, when, at the age of
40 or older, men affirmatively seek and provide the court with evidence of permanent
sterilization. Men who do not comply with the requirement will potentially face
penalties and jail time.

It will totally work. Abortion procedures to end unplanned
or unwanted pregnancies will effectively end. Taxpayers will save all that
money we currently spend on social support services for children of singlemothers. And women will take charge of their
reproductive rights—not by wearing modest clothes, or taking purity vows, or
avoiding dangerous situations, but by controlling the real cause of unwanted or
unplanned pregnancies: men.

Since you’re a man, you’re probably saying, “That’s not
fair! The government doesn’t have the authority to control my reproductive rights!”
I tend to agree with you. But if you’re comfortable trying to control women’s
reproductive health but not men’s, I want to know why. Why is it acceptable to
pass laws that affect women’s access to reproductive healthcare but not to do
the same (but much less invasive) thing to men?

And now you know how many women feel when men like you talk
about overturning Roe v. Wade.

No pro-choice woman I know wants to have an abortion of
convenience. Not one. But pregnancy, in addition to creating the Miracle of
Life, is also a medical condition for the woman involved, one that comes with
very real risks including the risk of death to the mother and/or fetus. While I
believe that abortions of convenience are morally wrong, I also think abortions
of necessity are an unmitigated tragedy for all involved. These babies are
wanted. They are loved. But a serious medical emergency occurs, and mothers
have to make unthinkable choices. For them and their families, we should have nothing but compassion—not laws
threatening punishment or preventing necessary and life-saving medical care.

It basically comes down to trust. We should trust that all
women, when provided with education, options, and support, will make the right
choice, the moral choice. In fact, when women have access to reliable, affordable
birth control, abortion rates plummet. While I think that abortions of convenience are morally wrong, I also think
that no abortion should ever be illegal.

And this, Governor Pence, is precisely why I support PlannedParenthood. Because you know what? I don’t care how we
do it. I just want to end abortions that terminate unplanned or unwanted
pregnancies. And Planned Parenthood, which provides affordable reproductive health services to men and women, does just that.

Since I doubt you’ll accept my proposal for mandatory male birth
control, I hope that instead you’ll take action that will actually end abortions
by fully supporting women’s—and men’s—access to reproductive healthcare. To my
mind, that’s the only moral choice.

P.S. Just in case you don’t want to donate to Planned Parenthood
yourself, Governor Pence, 20,000 people took the literal liberty of donating in your name.

Monday, October 31, 2016

A month or so ago, I took the unusual (for me) step of unfriending and blocking someone on social media. The woman in question is someone I consider to be a friend IRL (in real life). But after I deliveredseveral polite but increasingly stern private warnings about her posts on my personal Facebook page, she crossed a line.

When I ebulliently shared my and other advocates’ successful attempts to convince Knotts Berry Farm and Six Flags to close their offensive and stigmatizing Halloween asylum attractions, my friend felt compelled to share her point of view that advocateswere reading way too much into this “fun” and that we were in fact ruining Halloween in the name of “misguided political correctness.”

To be fair, my friend knows firsthand the real and painful struggles of caring for someone who lives with severe mental illness. She’s also very smart. When I blocked her, she sent me a long email missive entitled “Offended by logic?”

My response? “I have made up my mind on this issue. Discussion is over for me. Find someone who is interested in having this discussion.”

I don’t take this kind of step lightly. I love learning new things and hearing alternate perspectives on just about every subject you can imagine.

But I also believe we all have our proverbial lines in the sand. There are a few things I have made up my mind about, and I don’t want to “debate” these issues further.

In fact, there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging and enforcing these personal boundaries, which I’ve decided to brand as my “nevermores” in honor of Edgar Allen Poe’s taciturn raven.

Here’s a partial list of my “nevermores,” orthings that I have made up my mind about:

If you want to ask me about my carefully thought out, researched, reasoned position on any of the above, I will be more than happy to share it. But these are not things I’m interested in debating. I’m not saying other people can’t hold other points of view than mine—of course they can! I’m just not interested in conversations on these topics, because I have already made up my mind.

No. It’s the same story, and the same emails. And frankly, like the majority of Americans, I don’t care about Hillary Clinton’s “damn emails.” Mrs. Clinton is a woman about my mother’s age, with the same level of technophobia. She made a mistake, and she admitted it. This kind of mistake (fortunately!) really has proven to be the definition of “no harm, no foul.”

But for the men who have repeatedly tried to destroy Hillary Clinton, there was definitely harm, and there have beenplenty of uncalledfouls.

Every time I see Julian Assange’s smug smirk, all I can think is “sexual predator.”

Every time I see the unfortunately named Anthony Weiner in the news, all I can think is, “sexual predator.”

And yes, to be fair, every time I see Bill Clinton, I think of how he betrayed lhis wife, his daughter, and the nation—for sex with “that woman,” Monica Lewinsky, who has now emerged as a brave and powerful voice for women everywhere.i

It’s ironic—no, more like terrifying—that all of the prominent men standing in Hillary Clinton’s way are connected with sexual assault. It’s even more terrifying that women’s voices weren’t enough to legitimize this fear, and that even though Trump’s own words have exposed him for what he truly is, he is still considered a viable candidate for President of the United States.

I’ve already voted—and I wouldn’t change my vote based on this “new” (aka, same old, same old) information about emails. But to journalists everywhere, I would issue this plea.

Set boundaries.

James Comey failed to set boundaries when he issued his cryptic letter to Congress, and in this failure, he has allowed you—and Trump—to “write the book” on what the FBI may, or may not, find.

It’s not that hard to do this the right way. When you weigh in on whether this new email discovery may lead to a reopening of the investigation that could harm a Clinton Presidency, it is only fair and balanced to ask the same questions about Donald Trump, who is currently facing a civil trial for defrauding students with Trump University and has a post-election December 16 hearing on allegations that he raped a 13-year old girl. I hope—though in the current climate of rampant institutionalized misogyny, I cannot assume—that a rapecase would seriously harm a Trump Presidency.

Granted, Hillary Clinton is not perfect. I don’t know many people who are. But she is more qualified than any other male—or female—candidate in the United States today. And she is our best chance to break that “highest, hardest glass ceiling.”

So I don’t want to discuss Hillary Clinton’s emails with you anymore. It’s time to vote for the most prepared, qualified candidate in the history of the United States. It’s time to make herstory a reality.

Because if Donald Trump wins, there's a frightening chance that too many Americans' hopes and dreams will be "nevermore."

About Me

Liza Long, aka the Anarchist Soccer Mom, is a writer, educator, mental health advocate, and mother of four children. She loves her Steinway, her husband, her kids,and her day job, not necessarily in that order. Her book "The Price of Silence: A Mom's Perspective on Mental Illness" from Hudson Street Press is available in bookstores and online. The views expressed on this blog are entirely her own and in no way reflect the views of her employer (or anyone else, for that matter).