An End to the Torment of Freaking Fruitcakes

Sweet Elune … I am finally freed from that painful obsession. I can FINALLY stop flying back and forth seven times each day for a chance, a chance mind you to acquire a Rotten Little Helper. The madness has ended … I can now purchase food for the holidays and clean house prior to guest’s arrival. Yeah, I’m not sure I’m that happy about the last one.

Cim was the third run this morning. I had decided it would be the last one today. I came to grips with the reality that I probably wouldn’t be getting a Helper. I was Lumpyless through six Winter Veils until kind Helke sent Cat hers. So it would be. It wasn’t the flying … it’s wasn’t the boss because I think in the 42 bazillion times I flew up there I only saw the boss maybe three times … I just picked up the box and returned …

That’s when the soul crushing began. Another FREAKING FRUITCAKE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO … I can’t take it! Make it stop! Please! Something else, anything else, a Grindgear Toy Gorilla, ANYTHING! Just not a … not a … see, I can’t even say it.

So a friend comes to visit yesterday and my mother comes over to see her and … and … she walks in the door with a FRUITCAKE. It took every bit of will I had to not slam the door and run away screaming. I don’t know, the fruitcake aversion damage may be permanent.

Figures the rotten little guy would come out for a Warlock, same disposition those two. I asked Cim to turn her mount into a reindeer for the shot, she just gave me a hand gesture and said, get on with it.

Anyway, I want to express my sincerest apologies to the Ironforge Sanitation Department … really, we’re so sorry. We honestly didn’t know flushing seven fruitcakes a day would have the effect they did on the plumbing. I’m sorry they backed up. I’m sorry there was an incident.

Yeah … we got out just before those pipes blew. I heard it was … freaking awful.

Gagh! You WASTED fruitcake? Tell me it isn’t so. How can you not like it. We made ours a month ago ($40 worth of dried fruit) and I’ve been dieing to get to it. Still…. I know the younger generation (40yo and under) doesn’t like it too much, if at all, so you might be forgiven.
The address for unwanted fruitcake is c/o Postmaster, Stormwind.

Well done on the pet, btw. Almost forgot what with the fruitcake shock and all.