Once upon a time, there was a goddessQueen who was married to The Guy She Lives Withher Prince Charming and they lived in an old, tiny Victoriana quaint castle in the kingdom of Ridley and had two young princes. They lived happily ever after. But before that happily ever after thing, they decided their castle was far too small to raise their princes (and needed a better school districtroyal educators) so they began looking for a new housecastle.

While they searched lands far and wide, the Queen’s oldest brother (also a prince) and his evil princesswife bought an even tinier castle about a mile away. And the Queen was happy, because nothing meant more to her than family. They had dinner together often. One night, on a particularly sunny and beautiful Spring Day, the Queen, her Prince, her two young Princes, Prince Oldest Brother , and the evil Princesshis wife (got all that?)all went for a walk around Prince Oldest Brother’s kingdomneighborhood and found an outdated fixer-uppera lovely single castle on a large, level lot. The Queen and her Prince felt it was perfect to expand their kingdom. And so they purchase the new homecastle , a mere three blockskingdoms from the Prince Oldest Brother in the Kingdom of Rutledge. And they were happy.

Not long after, the Queen’s youngest brother and his family bought a new castle a mere five blockskingdoms in the other direction from the Queen and her Prince, and about eight blocks from Prince Oldest Brother (stay with me here). They all lived together in peace and harmony, hosting large family gatheringsbanquets and feasts for their multitude of siblings and extended family members. There was nothing like a Kingdom of Pike Party and everyone knew it. And they were happy.

A few years later, Prince Oldest Brother married a new a Princess (long story) and the new Princess had two young princes of her own. Suddenly, Prince Oldest Brother realized they had grown out of his closetcastle. They began searching and put their closetcastle up for sale, and it sold quickly. And Prince Older Brother and his family were happy. But then they had to scramble to find a new, more spacious castle in a better school districtwith more skilled royal educators. And find it they did, eleven miles away in the Kingdom of Garnet. But it meant Prince Oldest Brother and his family would no longer be three blocks away from the Queen and it felt all kinds of weird and good and sad at the same time. And the Queen was happy for them but simultaneously sad she couldn’t brag about three siblings living within a mile of one another anymore. Because that’s totally normal. AHEM.

But then The Queen remembered she was off the hook for hosting Thanksgiving or Christmas (because now Primce Oldest Brother has a bigger house) and suddenly proclaimed, “HUZZAH!!” for all the kingdom to hear. And they lived happily ever after.
The End.