I'm going to try to explore a new paradigm in dating site profile
writing: brutal honesty. Ready? Here we go:

THE CONS: (I figure it's better to get this stuff out of the way
first - can't have dessert before we eat our vegetables,
right?)

* I have an extremely rare condition that causes the skin on the
right side of my body to produce too much collagen, making the skin
itself very hard and lacking in elasticity. This limits my range of
motion and causes me to walk with a limp, due to the fact I can't
straighten my right knee and flex my right ankle properly. The
upshot of this is that I can't comfortably walk long distances or
be on my feet for extended periods of time. I like the outdoors and
nature as much as anyone, but sadly, I won't be taking 15-mile day
hikes through the Smokies anytime soon. More like 2 miles,
max.

* I'm allergic to cats. The extent of the allergy depends on the
cat in question. Some, I can hang with just fine. Others, my eyes
start to water after about an hour in the same room, unless I take
a Benadryl first, which makes me groggy and lethargic and no rock
'n' roll fun. So if you live with four Persians, hanging out at
your place is realistically not going to be an option. This blows,
as I do like cats, but it is what it is. (side note: dogs, on the
other hand, looooooove me, and the feeling is mutual, unless you
own a tiny bitey yappy dog, in which case I have to ask: "why do
you own a tiny bitey yappy dog?")

* I'm not tall. I'm 5'7" 3/4, which in my view rounds up to 5'8". I
have dated taller women sans self-consciousness, but I do
understand that height can be a dealbreaker and have accepted this
fate with Napoleonic aplomb.

Still reading? Excellent.

THE PROS:

* I'm smart, sometimes even witty, and, I'm told, a good
conversationalist. I have a pretty insatiable curiosity about most
things and can hold my own in most spheres of talking.

* Although I do have some physical limitations, I work out
regularly and am in pretty good shape. After years of neglect, I'm
working to becoming a healthier person. That being said, I enjoy
bourbon, red wine, and steak, because I believe in moderation in
all things, and being healthy and fit doesn't mean you have to
deprive yourself of everything pleasurable in life.

* I'm politically and culturally aware without (I'd like to think)
coming across as a pretentious douche. In fact, pretentiousness and
I are sworn enemies locked in eternal mortal combat. If you're a
hipster (and I know nobody admits to this particular label, but if
you are one, you know it), we're probably not going to get along
that well.

* I'm polite, kind-hearted, generous, and generally decent. I say
please and thank you and sir and ma'am because that's how I was
raised. I treat service industry employees with respect and am a
very good tipper.

After years of slaving away at a dead-end job, the company shut
down, forcing me into new lines of work, which include teaching
guitar lessons privately and some freelance music
editing/composition stuff. And, for fun, playing drums in a rock
band. Don't worry: I'm not broke. I'm not rich, of course, but I'm
financially secure and have a car and my own place and all that.

Movies: Dr. Strangelove, The Graduate, Cool Hand Luke, Donnie
Darko, The Godfather, There Will Be Blood, pretty much anything by
Wes Anderson, Martin Scorcese, or the Coen Brothers, the original
Star Wars trilogy

Music: the Shins, Spoon, the Beatles, Beach Boys, Guided by Voices,
Flaming Lips, New Pornographers, Beck, Besnard Lakes, Phoenix,
Sloan, Radiohead, the Who, Beastie Boys, Queens of the Stone Age,
local stuff - this could take all night, so I'm going to wrap it up
here.

you have a sense of humor. If you enjoy banter, witty repartee,
sarcasm, flirty/playful mutual antagonism, and interesting
conversation about a variety of topics. If you're open-minded. If
you're a musician, or at least a lover of music. If you're also
insatiably curious. If you want to.