Hey there, crayon fans! Hope y'all had a great weekend. I meant to post something new on Saturday, but then I had a brilliant idea and decided to save the update for later. My idea? CRAYONCON!!! See, Otakon was this weekend, and since I didn't go for the first time since 1998 I decided to make up for it by holding my own little anime-themed culinary festival of sorts! I'm acting like it's a big deal, but really it's just an extended Foodstuffs article. You'll humor me, won't you? Oh yeah, the fourth and final Forkless Gourmet Bun Meal review is contained in there as well -- so if you care at all about that, be sure to read to the end of the piece. 🙂

And then, in Dusty Plastic HELL: Hot Flash #50, I parody the recent wave of Popeye's Chicken commercials featuring comedian Bruce Bruce. You won't find the comic funny if you haven't seen the ads, but... hell, you probably won't find it funny even if you have seen the ads, 'cause they play out pretty much exactly the way I've laid it out and there's nothing funny about them. I'm starting to think that maybe I'm missing the joke, though -- we're not supposed to find what he says funny, but rather we're supposed to be laughing at the fact that this 400 lb. "black" dude is telling jokes about how much he loves him some fried chicken. Now, that's not my primary issue with the ads -- I just don't think they're funny at all, and the fact that Bruce Bruce is grossly overweight adds an element of "WTF?" to the commercials -- but if you read the guestbook on Bruce Bruce's website, a lot of people have seriously taken issue with the ads on those grounds. And I dunno, maybe they have a point, especially given the nature of some of the jokes. While the jokes about his car automatically swerving towards Popeye's and the one about him seeing his aunt naked and not eating for a month are just dumb (what, does the car eat Popeye's too? and regarding the second joke, maybe he should see his aunt naked more often), the one about his mother hitting him because he prefers Popeye's chicken to hers is really weird and, moreover, does support the stereotype that "black" parents are inclined to beat their children for stupid reasons. That's not cool.

As always, feel free to share your thoughts and comments on either piece. Take care until next time, minna-san!

[sarcasm]Y'know, I absolutely LOVE how Bruce Bruce is perpetuating tired stereotypes so he can earn more money for the corporate overlords that rule every moment of our lives! Why, it makes me shiver with orgasmic glee to see him degrade himself just to sell chicken! Maybe he can do some jokes about watermelon and cotton, too![/sarcasm]

Note to Bruce Bruce: Pal, making jokes about being a fat black man who enjoys chicken to an almost fetish-like extent is about the dumbest idea for an ad campaign ever concieved.

Well, I'm comforted by the fact Bruce Bruce probably cries himself to sleep every night.

On a more positive note, I tried unagi (eel) for the first time today, and surprisingly enough, it wasn't half-bad! However, I curse the very name of wasabi, and I shall make it my personal duty to see that the viscous green paste is riven from the very face of the Earth. DEATH TO THE NASTY GREEN BEAN PASTE OF CERTAIN DOOM! DEATH TO THE SPICY DESTRUCTION IT BRINGS! DEATH TO THE STOMACH CRAMPS, BLOATING, AND VOMITING IT INFLICTS UPON THE NOBLE AND INNOCENT!

Also: Wes, you're friggin' ripped, buddy. You could wash clothes on those abs. Or fight crime.