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What emotions come to your mind when you hear the word “holidays”? Are you flooded with a sense of excitement imagining twinkle lights, summer braais and family gatherings? Or are you consumed with feelings of stress, racing thoughts and what-if questions on how you are going to manage getting everything done in time?

Perhaps the holidays bring about a great sense of sadness or loss and are an acute reminder of what could have been? Realistically, you may feel all these things in one form or another at this time of year.

Here are a few ways to help carry your own mixed bag of emotions:

Acknowledge the Bag: What’s inside your bag of emotions? Happiness, sadness, grief, stress, anxiety, dread, excitement? Take a moment to think about this, acknowledging each of your emotions and how they influence your mood.

Slow Down: You’ve heard this many times before. Do you have five minutes before you fall asleep, 30 seconds to smile at a stranger, a small break at work to bring yourself back to the present or the time spent in your car? Whenever it is, take the time to slow yourself down, recognize the emotional benefits, and just be.

Give: When we think of giving during this time of year images of presents often pop into our heads. Beyond this, giving of time, space, and energy are all ways in which the receiver and giver can fill their emotional bags with positive feelings.

Traditions: Embrace the traditions you have and create new ones. This can look different for everyone and can be difficult if you are in a time of transition however, traditions provide a sense of stability in one’s life and can reduce stress in an efficacious way.

Gather: Call up that friend you’ve been meaning to get together with, invite family over for a meal, volunteer, or attend holiday happenings around your town. Connecting with others during the holiday season is a great way to combat feelings of loneliness and provide a sense of fulfilment in a way that is unique to everyone. Our collection of emotions is ever-changing.

This season recognize where you are at, reflect on the events of this past year, and redirect your focus to how you’d like your bag of emotions to influence your life in the New Year.

Christmas is a time for festive fun and family dinners, but often brings about heightened emotions.

Spending some time coming home to ourselves and compassionately examining our true feelings, can lead to healthier emotions round the festive tree.To avoid frazzling during the frenzied festive period, we need to put as much effort into preparing ourselves mindfully as we do decorating the house, buying presents, stocking up on food, and putting the final bits of tinsel on the tree.

Families failing to get themselves in the right frame of mind for Christmas may cook up a recipe for disharmony and an emotionally fraught few days.In theory, Christmas should be a time to relax and enjoy the company of loved ones without having to worry about the stresses of work. Too often the furious pace of the build-up and the holiday period itself can leave many with lower tolerance; fatigued and frustrated.

A few helpful hints to get through this period:

Only spend what is truly affordableBuy gifts with true intent and forethoughtGive without expecting anything in returnIf it didn’t work last year, does it make sense to want to do the same this Christmas?Be prepared – buy things in advance – reduce any last-minute rushesOnly buy what’s really neededBe kind to yourselfBe mindful

When we slow down, even just a little, and focus on our presence (be here, now), are kind to ourselves in mind and body, then our loved ones will notice peace in ourselves and appreciate some higher tolerance levels.

Social isolation can be more problematic at a time of year when relationships with others are magnified in their importance. Look for local community events you can attend, there are LOTS!

The Christmas/New Year period can often be one of reflection of the year gone by and contemplation of the year to come. Try to focus on the progress you have made and the positive things that have happened in the year.Get outdoors and enjoy some exercise or some relaxing time in peaceful surroundingss; the park, the beach, a lake. Consume food and beverages in moderation. Overindulgence is detrimental to our health both physically and mentally.

Remember, Christmas is just one single day. Don’t place too much importance or emphasis on what you think it should be. Maintain realistic expectations. Remember your personal value.

Contact me to help you through this season - nadine@nadinetherapy.co.za or on 084 779 4889. Visit my website on www.nadinetherapy.co.za.