The Gay World of Selena Gomez

After photos turned up in 2014 of Gomez scrub-a-dub-dubbing with gal pal Cara Delevingne, who’s openly bisexual, what transpired? Gay gossip, of course.

Gomez doesn’t care, she says, “because they weren’t talking about other people in my life for once, which was wonderful.”

In fact, regarding the blogosphere buzz, Gomez, 23, tells me she “loved it,” a testament to the entertainer’s true-to-herself, not-really-caring-what-you-think-anymore persona. That same perspective is reflected in all the dizzying late-night pillow talk throbbing throughout her sexually liberated and self-reflective second studio album, Revival.

For a small-screen darling who grew up under the watchful eye of Disney, Gomez’s openness both on the album and in conversation is refreshing. After recently revealing that she was diagnosed with the autoimmune disease lupus in 2013, she concurs that, yes, this is her coming out party of sorts. (Actually, the way she puts it is, “werk!”)

And so it is, as Gomez speaks candidly about other aspects of her life: “absolutely” questioning her sexuality, growing up around her mom’s gaggle of mimosa-sippin’ gays and – cue the awws – her admiration for ex-flame Nick Jonas’ “love and compassion for everyone.”

Growing up in Grand Prairie, Texas, what was your introduction to the gay community?
You have to understand: My mother is absolutely fantastic and she worked at a modeling agency when I was a very young girl, so every Sunday I would have brunch with her and all of her gays, and I just remember a lot of mimosas. It was the best. So, I’ve been around it my whole life and, you know, I love it. I have to tell you: On my 16th birthday my mom had a bunch of drag queens come out and they sang “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)” and it was sooo funny.

As someone raised Catholic, accepting the LGBT community was never an issue for you then?
Not at all. Look: There’s a huge difference in how I was brought up; the word “religion” is a very complex thing. It’s something you have to follow, and that’s not what faith is. Anybody who has a higher power, anybody who has anything they believe in: If you don’t know how to love other people, I don’t believe in it. It doesn’t work that way.

Have you ever met a Selena Gomez drag queen?
Yes! I had one who did one of the viral videos of “Love You Like a Love Song” (Willam Belli’s “Love You Like a Big Schlong”). (She) did a nasty version of it, which was hysterical, and I went to the Logo NewNowNext Awards and I got to meet her, which was amazing. Honestly, I feel like that’s when I made it – genuinely! I emailed it to my mom and she emailed it and CC’d everybody.

You say Selena drag queens were the true measure of success for you. But isn’t it true that you’re not truly famous until you’ve been the subject of a gay rumor? And last year, the tabloids had a field day with photos of you and Cara Delevingne.
I’ve made it!

How did you react to those rumors?
Honestly, I loved it. I didn’t mind it. Especially because they weren’t talking about other people in my life for once, which was wonderful. Honestly, though, she’s incredible and very open and she just makes me open. She’s so fun and she’s just extremely adventurous, and sometimes I just want that in my life, so I didn’t mind it. I loved it.

Have you ever questioned your sexuality?
Oh, I think everybody does, no matter who they are. I do, yeah, of course. Absolutely. I think it’s healthy to gain a perspective on who you are deep down, question yourself and challenge yourself; it’s important to do that.

Your friend Demi Lovato played a lesbian on Glee, starring as Naya Rivera’s love interest. Who would you choose as an onscreen lesbian love interest?
That’s a long list! Suki Waterhouse – she’s a model; she was Bradley Cooper’s girlfriend.

As a performer, when were you first aware you had an LGBT following?
My first single was when I was 16 and that went to No. 1 on the Dance Club charts so that was my introduction. I don’t think people really knew me, so I don’t know if it was a following necessarily, but once I hit “Love You Like a Love Song” status, that’s really when I started realizing it. And it was the best!

My concerts used to be little kids, and then seeing the entire front row being all these guys who were wearing neon T-shirts and just losing their minds – it’s incredible. And then you see the jocks in the other corner throwing their boxers on stage. It’s like, “Oh gosh.” It’s amazing.

You say “oh gosh” like it’s a problem.
(Laughs) Well, it is a little bit; come on.

Do you keep your gay fans in mind when you create music, particularly with Revival?
Absolutely. One-hundred percent. Even with my earlier stuff, I’ve always tapped into it, and at the end of the day I’m a full-on pop artist, so I wanted the tracks to be incredible because I know how important that is. But on top of that, having the lyrics be equally as important was something I needed to do for this album. I think it just kind of came together really well. I spent a year on it and I poured everything I had into this album, and I was thinking of everyone. I was thinking of my diehard fans from everywhere.

Have you ever dated or fallen for a gay man?
Honestly, I don’t have that story, but two of my best friends do and it’s very Will and Grace-like, which I love. But no, I haven’t actually experienced it – wait, maybe that’s not fair to say. Maybe I won’t know? Maybe I don’t know? (Laughs) I just thought about that. Oh my gosh. I’m thinking about my whole life now.

Nick Jonas, Justin Bieber, Taylor Lautner: Aesthetically speaking, you have good taste in men. How jealous do your gay guy friends get of the people you’ve dated?
Oh gosh, they’re more into it than I am. Honestly! Part of the reason I probably went out on a few dates is because of them. They’re just like, “Go! Go!” I’m like, “No!” They’re all about it, for sure.

So your gay friends are your matchmakers?
All the time. Whoever I’m with or like or don’t like, they’re all about dissecting it and putting me with other people.

It must be fascinating for you to see Nick Jonas become such a gay icon. His outreach… his underwear pics…
And his (gay) characters that he’s been playing! Scream Queens and the other show, Kingdom, which I thought was super rad. We actually talked about it at dinner one time. He’s incredible, and I think it’s amazing. I’ve known him for years – we were 14 when we met – so it’s crazy, because I actually knew him at a different time in his life. Now, to see him have this amazing perspective on life is awesome. I’m really proud of him.

Are you surprised by the way he’s connected with the gay community?
Yeah, for sure! Not in a bad way, but I was like, “Thank you.” It was kind of incredible for somebody to step out of their zone for a minute. It’s really incredible to see what he’s done.
It’s incredible to not really be in a judgmental place and to really let down all of your guards. I just think you have to really let go, and you do have to find this in your heart. He clearly has had a love and compassion for everyone, and I think that’s great.

The cover of your album, where you’re basically naked, is pure empowerment. You seem very comfortable in your own skin.
Every other day it changes, but this year is a very important year for me. A lot of discovering and exploring who I am. It was exciting for me while also being a little complicated; I had dealt with certain body issues and things like that. Once the album was put together and I went through so many different emotions, I knew that this was my moment to really share my heart, because there are so many people who follow or look up to me who are dealing with so much in their own life. I just want to give my all to it – give all of myself literally.

Are there any gay people in your life currently who helped you on your journey to self-actualization?
Yes, one of my dearest – his name is Gweny. He’s been on my Instagram many times – featured on my Insta! (Laughs) But he’s very sweet and unbelievably confident. He’s a dancer, so he knows how to move his body. Even when I dance, sometimes I’ll ask him to dance with me in the mirror so I can be comfortable in my movements. Sometimes I get a little self-conscious and don’t think I’m a great dancer and he’s able to pull me out of my head instantly. Also, I’ll wake up one morning and he’ll be cooking breakfast, and all of a sudden The Sound of Music is on and it just makes my life happy. He’ll just run into my room and cheer me up and yeah, he’s been a huge part of the last four years of my life. He’s changed my life.

You have had to become an adult in front of the whole world. For you, how hard is it to grow up in the limelight?
The worst part about it is the lack of forgiveness. When you’re a quote-end quote “child star,” it’s just unfair to be able to throw things at people when they don’t even know who they are yet. So that’s the only frustrating part, because, ultimately, that’s life. Everybody goes through things, and more than anything, I think it’s just the judgmental part. But I enjoy it. I love my life, and I’m so thankful for it. I have been able to experience life in a different way, and even though there are some low moments, it’s incredible to do what I do.

You’ve credited Taylor Swift as not just a friend but someone you admire. How often do you and her shake it off at the gay clubs?
Oh my gosh – how chic! And all the time. Taylor and I literally will have mini dance parties with all of her dancers who are 100 percent gay (laughs) – and it’s the best feeling ever! It is so fun, and we just lose our minds.

So wherever you and Taylor are, it’s always a gay club? Even in her apartment?
Yeah, in New York! On tour! Backstage! The whole thing.

What is the most common misconception people have of you?
Lack of credibility. I understand that I come from Disney or whatever, but I feel like I’ve just scratched the surface of what I wanna do in film and music, to be honest. Even though I’ve been doing it for a while, I don’t feel like I have really gone there yet, and that’s fine. I think I gotta grow into it and make mistakes and learn and whatnot, but I do feel like that (credibility) is the one thing that people don’t give me enough of.

Do you ever Google yourself?
I have, yes. It’s very dangerous. I can’t do it often. I didn’t do it after the album came out because I didn’t know what the reviews were gonna be, and I mean, I can’t do anything about it now – the album is out – so I have to be confident in what I released. But yes, I have, of course. If people text me things or if I hear people talking about stuff, yeah, I’ll do it.

What is the craziest thing you’ve read about yourself?
What have I not read about myself at this point?! My gosh. I think I’ve been pregnant 15 times. That’s always been the craziest thing for me, which is my favorite. I’ll be at the beach and have the flattest stomach or not, and regardless, I’ll be pregnant. It’s the most hysterical thing to me.

To debunk any rumors of a 16th baby – are you pregnant right now?
No, nope – definitely not! (Laughs)