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average user, so Bill Gates had to call in yet another press conference promising not to think in terms of “average users.”)

In fact when Josh commented on anything happening in the world he found to be somewhat wrong, it got changed within a course of a day or two – for the better. Nobody likes bad publicity.

It didn’t stop there – talk about mind control – because whenever Josh mentioned a new record he liked, it would jump into the Top 10. It would become a world wide hit almost instantly. Not everybody would like the song, but you just had to know what the hype was all about. (Loudon Wainwright III in Top of the Pops. And he didn’t even have a new album out.)

Josh could now end wars, shape products, push companies close to bankruptcy, invent fashion (the list goes on)... and revamp the life of a generation.

Of course now Josh knew why every celebrity around complains they get too much attention when they take a stroll outside. When he walked the mall, girls were snickering. On the street people turned around, pointing. There were camera men outside in the garden, for chrissake. Josh felt like he had to adopt an attitude quickly, something like a rock-star lifestyle, so he would always know what to do and say and walk like. That’s probably why later the talking Josh-doll (Mattel paid him well) uttered clichees like “You know you want to” or “All the world’s a blog” or “Don’t listen to me, listen” or “You are a stranger, my friend.”

The only friend he lost was Frank. Frank felt like Josh didn’t have as much time these days as before... before, when Josh would still meet him and Joann for a drink. So Frank decided to end the charade; he emailed Google. And Google reacted. Josh was not only put down to a PageRank 0, he was completely banned from all rankings. It was like he lost his voice.

* * * *

Sure, as Josh would later say, he enjoyed celebrity status for some more weeks before the media decided to shift focus. But maybe it was for the better. After all, he didn’t have that much to say, really. So in his journal he continued to write about his nightmares, which admittedly gained a few outlandish colors. He could even find time to meet Frank and Joann. Knowing he’d be a footnote in future history books sort of made him proud, and well, a bit lazy.