When I teach new and emerging writers, especially those with goals of writing in the first person, this lesson is among the first in the series. It is deceptively simple, and it often leads to an existential awareness (for real) that the best first person writing is not, technically speaking, about you. It is about your reader.

I participated in a workshop led by essayist Philip Lopate, and he noted (I'm paraphrasing) that the trouble with modern memoir is that it typically falls into one of two categories: angry confessional or victim needing to be healed.With that in mind, here is my challenge. Write an essay. Or a blog post. Or a piece of memoir. Basically, get yourself a chunk of material that's all about you. Something meaningful, deep, hilarious, or in-process. Something you love.

Print out a hard copy (don't try to do this on the computer screen-it won't work), and circle all the instances you use "I," "Me," and "My" in your prose. Go line by line and circle them all.Then ask yourself if this material is aboutyou or about your reader.Re-write without using "I," "Me," or "My" in your prose and watch how the phrasing comes alive in a multi-dimensional, sensory way.Takeaway: As writers, it's not enough to detail our own experiences. We must make them relevant to our readers.

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