"I Will Find Words, Smith them Down. For Love Is Infinite And So Are They."

Well Well Well….

Uhem *Clears Throat*Anybody there?!So, Uhem, What’s up Ladies and Gents?!!I know I know, What are y’all thinking…Yes, I’m alive. Barley made it out from the other end but yeah alive.

So where was I all this time?

*scratches head*

Wellllll….I wish I had a perfectly good explanation for it…I sat here thinking for the longest time to come up with a perfect explanation but there isn’t any, to be honest. Or maybe there is I just can’t put it to words. I just needed time and space to clear my head, or so I thought. One day I just decided to get away from everything connected to this blog, any related accounts, everything. So I did. Why I didn’t inform beforehand? Well I just came out from hiatus like what? A week or two ago from this? It just felt inappropriate to go again and make a big deal out of it all. I challenged myself to be away for one week only, just to set a realistic goal, then I found out I can do this so it just extended as finals came up and now how long has it been? One month and 20 days? Well who was counting anyways *Puft*

I can say I had final exams, but those were way later in the start of February, January was a whirlwind too. I didn’t expect 2015 to be awesome or good to me, All I wanted was for it to be better than 2014 at least. Guess what? It proved to be way more shittier than 2014 and it’s just the start of the year. Hah! What can I say…JUST-MY-FUCKING-LUCK ! -_-

(This post is going to have shit load of sarcasm because that’s how I feel since my life has been unicorns shooting rainbows out of their assess since the day this year started, please notice the happiness dripping out of my words! ^.^ )

So did this break from blogging do me any good? Aiiiinnnn, Not so much. I’m stuck right where I was before, same old same old. Except now I have some more shit for me to whine about here. Hola!!! SO EXCITED -__-

Let the whining begin:

I worked my ass off for finals. I think it’s safe to say I haven’t studied so hard in my life before. I’m used to sacrificing my sleep for exams, but usually that’s just a week before the exam and during the exam season but this time around I started prepping three full weeks beforehand. I swear to God sitting from 3 am to 6 pm and onwards continuously in the same spot studying like you are a donkey for so many weeks is such a great feeling! Like honestly I wouldn’t even believe myself but time flies by when you sit with a course book in front of you at 3 am with so much to study and suddenly it’s 6 pm and whatt??!! I have been sitting at the same fucking spot for so long??? I have developed acute lumbar back pain which I’m sure is ready to turn chronic If I don’t start taking care of it.

Not to mention the compliments I’ve gotten on my dark circles, “Hey your Mascara/Eye Liner is running down your eyes”

Me: *Looks in the mirror* And to my absolute horror, “Oh These….are actually my dark circles.” That is how deep they have impinged themselves on my face that now it seems like makeup has run down my eyes. Another awesome feeling to have! #SoGrateful! :’) (Girls, any good concealers you are willing to recommend here would be of great help 😉 )

Just a week before my finals were about to start, I got ghastly sick. I have never been this sick in my life before. Either it was my mental exhaustion taking a physical toll on me or someone did voodoo on me for sure. Also I got to know how fucking great it feels to throw up. Believe it or not I had not vomited since I was very very little, totally forgot how It felt, but hey life was like “what, you forgot? Puft, Let me remind you bitch” So then that started. (Well it was partially my fault, took a heavy antibiotic with an almost empty stomach. In my defense, I said ‘Almost’ not completely empty.)

What? You think it ends there? Oh no that was just the start of my health decline graph. As I have never been so sick in my life before, let alone during exams, and that DURING FINALS, I just could not afford to be sick, I had no choice but to keep studying, no adequate rest and shit so I had to take bunch of pills to keep myself going. I had not taken so many pills in my life before as I had to take in one go at one time during the day in the past few weeks. Couple of 650 mg’s antibiotics against fever, cold, sore throat and whatnot. Then just a day before my Biochemistry exam I had severe respiratory congestion. #FeelingBlessed :’)

But hey you can’t die since you have exam the very next day ! 🙂

I could not breathe and I totally thought I was gonna die or worst not being able to give the exam the next day which I worked so hard for. Anyways I did give the exam somehow, To be honest it’s still a little blur though, Just between you and me, I think it’s because I was a bit high from all the pills.

So what I have ended up with is a gag reflex of a two years old. My Gag reflex has become so strong I can throw up on a drop of a hat now, like seriously. Oh and what a marvelous feeling it is to have experienced after so long and so frequently now! Just like oozing out rainbows ! Yaeyyyy for that! \o/ #SweetLife -_-

So throughout this time I was bound to have number of mental breakdowns which I would categorize as follows:

#1 Absolutely Out-Of-Hand Emotions

Absolutely Out-Of-Hand Emotions

#2 Questioning the Higher Providence

Questioning the Higher Providence

#3 Stage of Acceptance

Stage of Acceptance

#4 The most Dangerous of them all: Meredith Breakdown!

Still stuck on this stage.

Oh and that’s only tip of the iceberg shit that happened during the time I was gone. I’d rather skip the other shit filled details in my life that happened along the way, they are not half as fun to write about. So in a nutshell I’m completely and utterly, physically, more so mentally exhausted by now.

THE BEST THING THOUGH:

I opened my blog after so long aaaaaaaaaaaandddddd

A huge thanks to Jithin, Nad , Rob, Upasana for checking up on me while I was away by leaving such sweet and concerning comments for me to read when I came back.

Thankssss to Maryam, for joining me on my blogging journey and leaving so many beautiful and heart warming comments. Welcome to all the other new readers who have joined in and followed. I’ll meet you up on your blogs soon ❤

A special thanks to Maria, Bhakti and Kruti for keeping me sane and as a constant support behind the curtains.

There are so many comments I have got to reply to, Just let me get back on my blogging feet, I’ll reply soon and start catching up on what you guys have been up to on your blogs as well! It’s not entirely possible for me to catch up on each and every one of your posts since the past month and more, so please feel free to leave a link to any of the old posts you might want me to give a read, I would love to check them out!

I hope you guys would forgive me for this unannounced break. See ya soon ❤ ❤

sorry you’ve had a rough start to 2015 – welcome back to your virtual world of love and friendship with no lurgies lurking… missed you and hope that the coming days and weeks and months improve in every way possible… I recommend eating lots of comforting food and snuggling under your blanket and waiting til the sun decides to shine on you and all you do… peace and love to you

cheers! We are all ok, dreading the start of the silver birch pollen season any time now 😦 will see what the coming 4 months bring – hopefully no more anaphylaxis. peace to you and love and get yourself some warm and gooey on the inside choc fondants 🙂 make everyone feel better 🙂 x

before you get on ur bloggy feet Zee…take ample ample ample rest…half the shitty thoughts you are feeling will go away when you are feeling physically okay..and you a future doctor taking meds so carelessly Zee.. 😦 I know about respiratory congestion..a colleague just barely escaped from u know what..so please take care of yourself..bear hugs sweetheart..

I can’t tell you how happy I am to see you back!Hope you get well soon.Try not to stress yourself too much while studying.It has long term effects.From experience,it just gets worse.Enough of advice.I’m so so so happy to see you back! *sending many virtual hugs*
Can’t wait to read your posts!
Loads of love ❤ ❤ ❤

I was sick also during whole January with an illness so WTF I hadn’t been that sick…ever? Some kind of flu/cold mashup. You can read about it here, when i come back also to find super nice and heartwarming comments of people concern about me ❤

Heyyyy Ivyyyy!! ❤
So sorry to hear about you being sick throughout the month too 😦
Hope you are feeling much better now just as I am…Thank you for leaving your post with me, I'm gonna check it out. It's always a treat to read and see such kindness from people around us..

I hope everything else in life is going great for you ! love ya and read ya soon ❤

Welcome back!!!!! Checked out your blog every other day to see if my reader was wrong and you were back. Missed you. 🙂 A lotttttt!!!! Hope you are feeling better and your result comes out as awesome as you are ………………. Being terribly sick before exams? I hear ya….That happens to me every other time :p …Didn’t leave any comment , because I knew that you would post sooner or later about your absence 😉 (chuckle) In a nutshell welcome back sis … Hope you have a nice time and the last pic? I love you too 🙂

Thank you , it was a privilege if I could actually make you smile 🙂 I am afraid, that this year Kashmir was bereft of any snow cover 😦 It snowed but it melted before it could set , though hilly places were covered with it . Good luck on your future endeavors 🙂 😀

Oh sweety! I had NO IDEA that you had all these stressing factors around you being sick AND studying for an exam, you are really brave girl, Zee! I missed you so much and was worried about you. I hope that you are feeling much much better!!! Welcome back chooti bhen ❤ Lots of love!

Yups! it’s showing up now, but I do hope you’re recovering now? maybe get in.. say.. 3 hours of sleep at least? how’s things there btw? been hearing a lot of news of how unstable governments have become

I was actually planning to find your number and stalk you and check if you were ok. Glad I didn’t do that 😉 😛 Otherwise I would have to hear all the s***t f**k words 😛
Anyway good to see you here again.

Zeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Welcome back! You’ve been missed. Sounds like you have a lot of things going on. Take your time getting your blogging feet under you. As long as you’re ok, then I’m ok. See you soon! 💗💗💗

Roooooobbbbbbb !!!! You already know I missed having you around my blogging corner, so glad that I’m back here ❤
Can't wait to have a piece of your Tid-bit Tuesdays and I see you changed the name of your blog! I likkeeeee ittt, The V-Pub! Sounds exactly like the place I would love to hang out at, Warm cozy and spiced up 😉 😀

i missed you Zee 🙂
And guess what? even i study like that haha!
do take care of your health though. Even i have been ill all January this year..what a great start!! Take care of yourself. Trust me I have realized this the hard way. And I am still in the process. Learning self-love is taking me time.
Well i am glad to see you back. You know something… although I haven’t seen you ever, or hardly know about your life, I feel connected to you. That’s why I messaged you the other day.
Looking forward for more posts full of sarcasm and humour 😀 I love it!

Heyyyy Upasana! Isn’t this what blogging is about after all? To feel connected with each other despite of the fact that most of us haven’t seen each other ever, neither do we know everything about one and other but still feel as though we know some people since the longest time. Some friendships remain with us even after we leave blogging or writing. Some people always stay with us 🙂

Thank youuuu so much for all the love you’ve sent my way, I hope we get to connect some more ! ❤

P.S Phewww good to know I'm not alone in this Studying Sparta Battle! 😛 lol

I am good honey ❤ feeling the blogging blues nowadays. I have so many ideas..but the quality I am for is not coming through. So just focusing on photography as of now. And just studies.. my last semester just started..how's your health now?

There is a rule – well rested well tested. Studying long hours is great to a certain extent. When you are too tired it’s harder to actually get anything out of it. And of course too little sleep is bad for your health. OK, end of lecture 🙂 I’m sure others are lecturing you on sleep and health so you don’t need me to do so too.

I’m sorry you’re having such a bad year so far. I did miss you and assumed it was because of school. Hopefully your year improves.

Aah it’s alright Trent, You are taking time to lecture me it means you care. It’s a way of showing that you care I get it. Just so you know I would rest and sleep if I could, it’s just that it isn’t possible with the tight schedule we have of exams and my routine. Thank you for always being so concerned, you know I really appreciate it ❤

I do hope the year gets better too, Keeping my finger crossed without getting my hopes too high is the motto here! 😀

Very, very cold. I want warm weather! I want to see the thermometer read something above 0 C! well, it has been there briefly a few times in the last two months, but only briefly and only a little above 0.

Ah, the book. I hope to start shopping it around again. I want it to be traditionally published. In the mean time I put some music up on Amazon and iTunes. I’m not going to make money from it (it’s some of my classical music) but I thought it was cool to release it anyway.