Friday, September 9, 2016

This mosque situated in Finsbury Park (When I say Finsbury Park, people go like -.-? But when I say 'its close to the Arsenal stadium', they go like owh okay :D) looks like a run down shop house more than a spiritual house. But I wouldn't trade it for a 100 beautiful mosques in Malaysia. It's called the Muslim Welfare House but we malaysians used to call it Mewah (Muslim Welfare House -> MWH -> MeWaH).

Because it is so awesome. Look at the advertisements on their electronic noticeboard, they have:

And I know they also have classes to train teachers, and local businessmen would use the mosque to hold their meetings. AND the mosque is packed to the brim during Maghrib prayers.

Skeptics (disguised as intellectuals) would point out that 'muslims in britain lack the formal institutions, thus necessitating the use of the mosque as an all-encompassing avenue for resolving daily situations unlike in Malaysia where our institutions are more decentralised'. Still, it is rare to find a mosque offering karate classes, and we can definitely do more to position our mosques as the center of community life. So think about it please ;)

Thursday, September 8, 2016

(Malay version below. Disclaimer: the Malay version is not a translation and I did not intend it to be so. Both languages have a different mode of thinking and different ways of conveying, and it is the meaning that I intend to convey, not the exact words)

Yesterday I had the good fortune of visiting my university for the first time. The first time I heard about it was, I think, during my undergraduate days. We had an Islamic Society dinner and some guys from SOAS were there as well.

I looked it up later and was quite intrigued. There's just something about the word 'oriental' that adds mystique to any word paired with it. Like how 'Oriental cuisine' conjures up an image of steaming tom yum made with a hundred different spices served in a 14th century Ming dynasty porcelain bowl (with dragons on the bowl, of course). Or how 'Oriental wisdom' brings to mind Master Oogway from Kungfu Panda.

Anyways, why did I choose to come here? You know, people try to rationalise a lot of their decisions as if they came about as a result of deliberate thought when actually, it was just a 'wow' or 'let's do it!' moment. I may spin stories about how my fridge is value-for-money, energy efficient, bla bla bla, while the actual 'wow' was the cool metallic silver exterior that made it look like it could be an Autobot in secret. And only then do we find good reasons to justify buying an Autobot.

I guess it was the same with this university. School of Oriental and African Studies brings to mind the kind of school that Indiana Jones would have gone to before embarking on his quest to find oriental and african treasures. It brings to mind professors speaking 10 different Asian languages and wearing kain pelikat (jokes aside, there is a Russian professor at this institution whose specialization is medieval Malay manuscripts. He can read old Jawi, which makes him more literate than 99.9% of Malaysians!)

And the good reasons kept coming in. Their page in Wikipedia had this bit of history: 'The school immediately became integral in training British administrators, colonial officials and spies for overseas postings across the British Empire.' Cool. Any school that trained an army of James Bonds gets my vote. And apparently Pendeta Zaaba and Syed Naquib al-Attas studied here too, so I hope real Oogways here could impart just a tiny bit of that wisdom to this unripe soul.

Sunday, May 31, 2015

“Oh, sorry”. She felt like slapping her forehead. Man,
how could I forget that?

“Who brought this reporter over here anyway?
Subhaaanallah, the things I have to go through.” He let out a long sigh.

“Chill, Captain. You know we need the coverage. If the
Avengers start, then everyone else will follow.”

“You talk to her then”. And he walked off.

“Sorry about the Captain. He’s a bit stressed out
about the whole Rohingya issue.” He took off his sunglasses, and she could see
that he hasn’t been sleeping these past few days. “So, how can I help you
miss..?”

“Natasha.” Her voice came out soft, and that’s not
like her at all. It was quite intimidating, seeing these legendary men in the
flesh. And there was a good reason why a lot of women swoon at the name of Tony
Stark.

“Ehmm, let’s see…so Mr Stark, why did your team decide
to help now? It seems like a waste of your superpowers. Normal people can
handle it, governments can handle it”.

“That’s exactly the point. Governments can, and
should, handle the situation, but they aren’t. You have a LOT of Muslim
countries, and very rich ones too, but a lot of them are happy to be kicking
the can into their neighbours’ street. They’re thinking, ‘Thank god it’s not happening
in my backyard’, but that’s not the way to go. The whole ummah is like a
body, one part suffers and the whole wakes up in pain. Even I know that”.

“Uhuh. Do you have permission for all this? You’re
trespassing into other countries’ land and seas, you know”.

A grin formed at the side of his mouth. “Number one,
we don’t need permission from these people who have no sense. Number two, it is
Allah’s land and sea, he gave it to us so we can do good. Besides, no one
gets angry at the Avengers, and we hope that this superhero stuff will push
people into doing something.” At that, his eyes lit up. “In fact.....put this as
an ad in your newspaper, ‘Iron Man loves the Rohingyans. Do you?’ And add a
picture of Iron Man pointing straight, one hand at the hips.” He chuckles. “There,
that would get them going.”

“I really hope that would”. She suddenly noticed
something peculiar about him. Throughout the whole interview he never looked at
her directly. Most of the time he was gazing at the floor or somewhere else. Tony
Stark, who had a well-known penchant for women, not taking the opportunity to
even look at one? This struck her as incredible.

“Heads up guys, we’re getting heat signals a few miles
down”.

“Wait, wait, before you go, one last question. We were
all shocked when all of you announced your reversion to Islam. How has that
changed you? I heard that Hollywood’s refusing to make another movie about the
Avengers.”

“Well, we like to say that we lost Hollywood, but
gained the Holy Word. And that is something I would never, ever give up, not
even if they take away my iron suits.”

“Never ever?”

“Never never ever. It has changed us for the better,
definitely. Yes the Black Widow decided to stop, she had to protect her modesty
and decided to wear the veil, but she’s still coordinating our missions. Now we
only care about pleasing Allah, not the studio producers, not the media, nor
anyone else. Yeah, its all good.”

“Thank you Mr Stark.”

“You’re welcome.”

“By the way, aren’t you supposed to suit up or
something by now? I think we’re getting close.”

“Don’t worry. We have a Hulk.”

*************

Dr Bruce Banner was sitting cross-legged in a pod at the
side of the carrier, eyes shut tight, fists clenched. He was muttering
something under his breath. Natasha tried hard to listen, but she couldn’t make
it out. He was, if she heard correctly, speaking in Arabic.

“What’s he saying?”

“Wait..”

Dr Banner’s muttering became louder, his breathing
stronger.

...وما لكم الا تقتلوا في سبيل الله

“It’s a verse from the Quran, ‘What is it with you,
that you don’t fight in Allah’s cause..’”

“Wow, he’s memorized the Quran? But you became muslim less than a year ago.”

“This is Bruce Banner, he’s a god-given genius.
He memorized the whole book in 2 months.”

“Wow.”

.. والمستضعفين من الرجال والنساء والولدان...

“He’s
a lot calmer now. He’s reading these verses to fire himself up.”

Banner leaped out of the carrier bellowing at the top of his
lungs, his body transforming into a colossal green mass. They could hear a large
thump as he landed, the sound of gunfire and the Hulk’s awesome roars as he
wreaked havoc amongst the bandits.

After a few seconds, there was just silence.

The intercom buzzed. “Banner here. The crooks are finished.
There are a lot of our brothers and sisters down here, some in cages. They look
famished and some need medical help, but otherwise they’ll be fine insyaallah.
Come down.”