Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Long Overdue!!

Yes, this post is so, so long overdue!! Can't believe it's been 2 months since I've last written! Just a few short months ago, these blogs were my life line!!! They were the place I could go and feel like I was not alone in this crazy process of international adoption, where I felt like I "fit in" as a mother in a way that I couldn't with my other friends who had biological children. Yet now, I am just a mom. We have become a normal family of three, and we have the normal life of any family raising a 17 month old boy! Randy and I are parents of a wonderful, amazing, adorable little boy who we get to wake up with every morning, put to bed every night, and just enjoy. It feels like we are finally just living our lives, instead of waiting to. Believe it or not, most days I don't even think about the adoption process, or what we went through to bring Brayden home. It must be like "labor pains" for moms of biological children. You do forget. You forget the pain and the negative stuff, and you are just living in the moment. Loving and enjoying your child, and are just so happy and grateful to have him..

However, I realize that there are many friends I've made in this journey that aren't there yet. They are still in the place of limbo. Their reality is the waiting, the uncertainty, the roller coaster of emotions that come with adoption. For those moms/dads I will try and be better about updating!!! I know how much I needed to hear and see how things were going with other families ahead of us in the process. I needed to see that things were going well and to just believe that at the end of all this, we'd REALLY have our child home with us! So I'm going to really, truly try to be better at updating for anyone out there who needs it!

So in the 3 1/2 months since we've brought Brayden home lots has happened. Overall, Brayden is doing amazing. He has gained 7 lbs since he's been home and grown 2.5 inches! (and is still growing before our eyes!!) He was so small when we brought him home. He weighed only 17 lbs now he's 24lbs and looks like a healthy toddler! He is very happy and well adjusted. He is becoming so independent and is just so curious. He loves 'figuring" things out! How things work how to put things together, etc. He will watch Randy/I do something and then he'll try to do it. I think it's a riot that he tends to try to close drawers and cabinets with his foot. (Like his mommy!) He loves to play and explore and absolutely loves being outside! He has gone from walking to running and loves to have us "chase" him around the house! He also loves to dance!!! He is very social and just loves to be out and about! He is amazingly well behaved in restaurants, and at the grocery store he just waves at everyone who walks by him! He's a riot!!! He loves being around other children too! Luckily a few of my close friends have young children a bit older or younger than Brayden. He loves, loves, being around them!!! He still sleeps great! At least 11-12 hours straight a night and he'll nap daily anywhere from 1.5 - 2.5 hours!

As I said he's a typical 17 month old boy, so yes, once and awhile he decides to have a little tantrum! (these started a few weeks ago.) Brayden does not like it when he doesn't get his way!! : ) They are also typical of his age, and are actually kind of funny sometimes!! He actually stamps his feet!! (Just like his mama used too!) and if he's really mad he'll throw himself on the floor!! (Also, like his mama did!!) ha! Randy and I just ignore him or try to redirect him with something else. They usually last an average of 2 minutes and then he just sort of forgets what he's upset about and is back to his happy self!! Ha!

The only "delay" we've noticed, and it's not too much of a concern just yet is that he doesn't talk. At all. He babbles and gibber gabs all day long, but he won't say any words. He HAS said mama and dada, yeah, shut, more, and hi. However, he'll go DAYS without saying any real words. Instead he points and does a squeaky "EHH" to tell you what he wants. HE will shake his head "no" when he doesn't want something, and he'll nod on occasion for yes. HE blows kisses when you say "I love you" or leans in for a hug or kiss. He waves for hi, goodbye, and night night. Once in a while he'll say a word but literally it's once on any given day, and then he's silent for 3 more!! His main form of communication is to just makes his noises and point. Or shake his head no if he doesn't want something. That's about it. We also know it's not a language thing because he understands everything we say!!! When we say "do you want to brush your teeth" he giggles and runs to the bathroom. When we say time for "night night" he blows kisses and heads to the stairs. When I say "Do you want to go for a walk?" He goes to my closet and takes out my running sneakers!! Literally it's like this about everything! I can ask him questions and he'll shake his head for no or giggle for yes! So, we are just wondering how long until he actually starts using words!!

We go for his 18 month appt. in July, so are thinking we might look into getting an early intervention screening for speech. Randy and I both feel like it's a control issue. Brayden doesn't talk because he doesn't want to. He also doesn't really need too. We are meeting his needs/wants without him speaking to us, which... might not be the best thing! : )

Overall, I feel Randy and I have settled into parenthood pretty well! We finally went out on our first dinner date without Brayden last week! My parents came and stayed with him and put him to bed. Of course, we were home by 9:30 as we were both wiped but it was fun to get out just the two of us!! I also went back to work the day after memorial day. This was not easy!! Luckily it was only for 3 weeks and now I'm off for summer break! However, I had a very hard time leaving him. Everyday the 1st week, I cried on my drive to work. I was fine once I was there, and knew he was in good hands with his daddy or if it was one of his 24 hour shifts at the firehouse, with nana or grandpa! Even still it was just so hard to leave him. Randy would call me and say they were doing tubby time and I'd just feel an ache that I was missing it. That was "our" time, and now I wasn't doing it anymore. Yes, I believe it was harder on me than it was on Brayden!!!
He had a hard time with the transition for the first few days but by the 2nd week he was much better as he realized Mommy would always come home in the afternoon after nap! Now, I'm back to being home 24/7 again and I'm loving it and it's like I never left! However, we'll have to do it all over again in September!! : ) For now, I'm just going to enjoy my summer and this time I have with him!! Well, sounds like nap time is over! Hope all is well with everyone! For all my friends waiting for referrals and news, my fingers are crossed for you and we're thinking of you always!!!

2 comments:

Sounds like things are going so great Maura. Ryerson didn't talk until he was about 18 months or so. Now you can't get a word in edge wise. He had a lot of changes in his life and is taking in and learning one thing at a time. Talk to your doctor (as any mom would), but the fact that he completely understands you and communicates with you the best way he knows how to...is a really good sign! it is so great being a mom and I told you....you would forget all about those up and downs of the process!!! Have a great summer off.