Cowbell Clas-sicks…

Well it has been 15 years of sheer debauchery at Lee’s Palace with the annual X-Mess from White Cowbell Oklahoma. The band never disappoints with their southern rock sound and their redneck ways to throw us in a complete state of turmoil, and that is just the first few songs. Once the Jagermeister comes out for its communion of depravity, the glowing eyes of the crowd get a little wilder.

The gluttony continues with events like drunken Santa coming out and whipping the crowd into a fit of laughter and distraction. That is because corporate guy comes out and tries very hard to have you spend all your money just to make him richer. I think the WCO posse is a little too smart for this, even though their vision is beginning to see double.

If that is not enough, we have an Evil Knievel astronaut floating around on stage, we have a flaming cowbell ready to set your face on fire and titillating dancers shaking their wares everywhere! Just when you think you have seen it all, Chainsaw Charlie opens up and attacks rolls of toilet paper to fly into the mob. They even sacrifice Pikachu on stage. Poor little fella.

Don’t forget about the music though. Their style of southern rock would make any preacher from Mississippi blush. They sing about cheerleaders, shooting a man who likes to gamble and trying out the latest taste in sausages.

Well, here comes another well, just when you think you have had enough, Santa Claus comes back on stage with a couple of harlots and recreates the scene in the manger, with the birth of our Messiah. Yes Santa really is the Virgin Mary, and to share in this joy, we got a chance to get close to the new born as he is sling shotted into the crowd for everyone to enjoy this miracle. Has White Cowbell Oklahoma have no scruples? Nope, and we like it that way. Maybe next year they will bring naked midgets and toss them into the audience, you just never know with these guys.

For those of you who have not experienced this absurdity, you will have to wait until next year. I guarantee Christmas will look a lot different after surviving this spectacle. You may even hug your Mother on Christmas day, well I did say maybe…