"It is a brave man who pays a woman a compliment in 2013. Bouquets that would have been gratefully received 20 years ago are now greeted with suspicion and cynicism – which is all rather sad, for the complimenter and complimente."

All of these commentators and the legion of offended men without newspaper columns who are convinced that their good wishes will be taken badly, and women despairing for the young women they see wincing when they’re praised have made one, huge, fundamental mistake: a compliment on someone’s looks is not communication, it’s sex.

No useful information is passed when a man says that a certain shape of dress suits its wearer, or that this particular way of arranging hair is better than that other way, or that heaven must be missing an angel. It’s purely a very low-level sexual act, intended to give pleasure to both parties and although a long way from touching or orgasms, it's still essentially the same activity.

Once that’s clear all confusion evaporates and everyone knows exactly why they can’t tell a pretty girl they’re looking pretty any longer. It’s not feminism, it’s not a change in society, it’s you. You’re being rejected. That girl, that pretty top, that lipstick or nice pair of shoes? They’re not for you. Back off.

Just like every other kind of sex there must be consent. In this case the consent must be implied, as even asking permission would be to venture into compliment-paying, so there’s every chance you’ll get it wrong, consent won’t be given and you’ll have overstepped the mark. It’s time to back off again, and this time don’t start pontificating about how modern girls can’t accept compliments. They’re perfectly capable of accepting compliments, but they don’t have to take them from you.

There’s a feeling that goes with having a compliment taken badly. It’s not a nice feeling. It can make you feel that the world has changed, and that young women no longer know how to accept good wishes in the way that they used to. That’s not the case. It’s not them.

This also simplifies matters for the Australian electorate. Tony Abbott is no longer a gaffe-prone dinosaur, he’s one half of a willing sexual partnership. If he made the same crack about pretty faces every time, regardless of how his addressee felt on the matter he would have a problem, but as it is he’s in the clear.

Women now have greater freedom to express their displeasure at this particular kind of unwelcome sexual advance, but make no mistake. They didn’t like it before feminism either, they just couldn’t say so as easily.