Spare the rod, Spoil the child

January 9, 2012

Gone are the days when kids will stop any mischievous act by just one tough stare at them. Those days, even if you spare the rod, one way or the other, you are not spoiling your child.

This morning I blew up! I have been trying my best to be more lenient with my eldest, but there are times that it just goes up my head and boom, that’s about it! Every single morning, we argue for a reason that it takes her ages to get up from bed, get dressed and have at least a couple of bites of her breakfast. And worst, she would just look at nowhere and try my patience. Or not move at all until her school service comes.

As much as possible, I do not spank her. I try my very best to spare the rod. I talk to her like a grown up most of the time. It’s either I send her to one of the corners of the house, sit there with her folded arms or ask her to face the wall and tell my househelp not to talk to her or just simply ignore her. A time out for her and for myself as well. These days, this does not work anymore. I would normally end up screaming for like more than 5 times already, and still, she’s focused to what she’s currently doing. As a consequence, she’d be grounded from watching TV and playing whatever gadgets she’s got access to.

Another usual issue that I have with her is her being picky eater or not have anything at all. What I do is, I take her with me and shop the snacks that she wants so she won’t have an excuse why she won’t have it. Last night, she requested for Coco Crunch Cereals. We gladly served it to her this morning. It has been lying on the table, waiting to be eaten since before 6am. Just because I spoke with her last night before going to bed, she gladly got up from bed, twice, after I woke her up. She had bath but still with little tantrums and murmurs. I could hear them clearly from the bedroom. When it was my turn to take bath, she was already in the bedroom with the nanny, giving her undies. From the bathroom, I could hear her complain. When I came out of the bathroom, 20 minutes later, she’s still not dressed up, with a messy and wet hair. I talked to her again and she gave in. But later on got cranky again because she did want her uniform belt tightened, when it’s not supposed to be done that way.

That was quarter to 7am already. At 7am, her school services comes. I asked her to get to the dining table and have her breakfast. She did but frowned and just looked down. She won’t lift the spoon and start eating. I told her if she doesn’t want to eat, just leave the table. But she won’t and continued frowning and throwing tantrums. That’s when I blew up!

I took her right in front of the kitchen sink, and told her “If you won’t eat this, this is what’s going to happen” and I threw whatever was served in that bowl. From now on, no more special requests. I took her uniform off and told her to sit in one corner. Grabbed a slipper and gave one on her bum! I told the nanny to tell the school service that she’s not going to school. I also instructed the nanny not to give her lunch. Of course, I won’t do that. I just had to say it so she would obey what I say next time. As usual, she’s grounded from watching TV and playing computers. I hid the remote controls and told the nanny clearly, no TV until I say so.

Before I left the house, I spoke to her again why I had to do that. I really wonder why she’s acting that way when most of my attention is on her compared with what I give to bunso. My reason is anyway bunso still doesn’t care that much.

Two hours later, I called home and she was already playing with bunso as if nothing happened. I spoke to her again and asked her things and she was responding normal. I told her to tell Ate Rose to give her food now. Then she asked me “Mama, can I also watch TV now?” No was still my answer.

Let’s see now what happens tomorrow.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Marketing Manager at Adventures Beyond Group | WAHM | Ex-OFW | Music Enthusiast | Cactus and Succulent Hobbyist | Hello Kitty Lover | A 42 y/o mom of two lovely girls sharing her adventures as she walks through motherhood and having to do most things on her own while her Indian national husband works miles away from home.

4 Comments

Maybe she is acting like that because she is jealous of her little sister. Even though you give he enough attention now, maybe before, when the little one was smaller you were not giving her the attention she wanted. And now she is just trying to maintain your attention. If i were you I would spend a day only with her. I would take her to the movies or go rollerblading or I don’t know, whatever she likes and see how she is behaving after.I’m looking forward for new posts.

That is true, it’s actually biblical. I’m sure you know that’s where it came from. Kids these days are very philosophical. I suggest, though, that when you say you’ll do something, make sure you will be able to do it because most kids will try your limits, if you really can (like saying ‘no food’ but just for a scare). When they find out that you don’t mean what you say, the worse the situation will get.

A full-time home-based Marketing Manager by day, a Mom by day and night, and a Blogger at any time. I’m 42 and proud. Mom of Derelle & Erchelle, sharing my adventures as I walk through motherhood and having to do most things on my own while my Indian national husband works miles away from home.

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