My husband works long hours and never showed me any affection. My neighbour moved in and we hit it off immediately and had lots of things in common.

I ended up confiding in him about how unhappy I was. We started having an affair and I left my husband, who was devastated.

I moved in with him in a town a couple of miles away from my husband but we soon started arguing.

He seemed so much fun compared to my husband, who worked hard and didn’t go out much. But my new boyfriend goes out all the time and never has regular work, so I see now I’ve made a huge mistake.

I really regret leaving him. I emailed him recently and told him how I felt but he said I’d hurt him too much to ever take me back.

How can I get him back?

Coleen says..

I DON'T know if you can get him back, to be honest.

The hurt and the pain you’ve caused is clearly going to take a while to leave him and it might never leave him.

He also might meet somebody else soon, so prepare yourself for that. You can’t expect him to say, ‘Oh, OK, never mind that you ran off with somebody else, I’ll take you back.’

He probably thinks you’ll just do the same thing again if you get lonely or bored, or if he has to work late. You’ve learned a hard lesson here – that the grass isn’t always greener. You’ve realised that all those things that bored you – his good work ethic for example – are actually the things that made him a decent bloke. For now, keep the communication lines open.

In time, he may forgive you but prepare for the fact he may not. Sorry for the harsh truth.