Welcome to the Piano World Piano ForumsOver 2 million posts about pianos, digital pianos, and all types of keyboard instruments
Join the World's Largest Community of Piano Lovers
(it's free)
It's Fun to Play the Piano ... Please Pass It On!

UNIVERSAL LAWS1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.11. Law of the Theater and Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies, and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.15. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.19. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.

UNIVERSAL LAWS5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

... reminds me of a story that's been doing the rounds for many years at a university where I studied for my first degree. It may be an urban legend, but who cares... it goes something like this:

Four students went on a weekend trip and had such a good time that they returned to town late for an exam. They went to the professor and asked for an extension, i.e. to be given a second chance at the exam. The excuse they gave was that their car had a flat tire on their way back from the weekend trip.

The prof agreed to schedule an exam for the four students. When the day came, he seated them in four separate rooms, and when they opened the exam paper, they found only one question:

That reminds me of when I met a pastor at a church to tune the piano. As we were standing there talking, a big bumble bee yellow jacket I believe, flew in his open car window. Try as he may to retain his compose and get the bee to scat, he was slowly losing it and me, quickly losing my ability to hold in my laughter. It did not take me long before I was busting up laughing just watching him.

He was a slightly over weight man, not easily moved, shall we say. The longer the bee stayed in his car, the more he began to panic. Especially when it flew toward his certain very sensitive organs. Then he was able to move pretty quickly! Makes me laugh all over just thinking about it. "Go, get away bee, GO, get OUTTA HERE! NO NOT THAT WAY GO!" Within 15 seconds I was laughing so hard, I could barely stand. Luckily for me, we knew each other pretty well and he understood that I could not stop laughing let along carry on a meaningful conversation at that point in time. I couldn't talk, let alone breathe! Tears were streaming down my face.... Finally, the bee flew out of his car and he rolled up the windows and said, "see ya fella's, I'm getting the hell outta here before he comes back!" He drove around the parking lot and then came back and said, "dangit! I still have to open up the door for you don't I? Is "it" gone yet?" I started laughing all over again.

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

'You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.''I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

Well, we had a very nice visit from our exchange student from Hong Kong. She's been living in the USA since she was here in 2003-2004. This was her 3rd visit but, this time she brought along her mother who wanted to meet us. Man, they sure do like taking pictures! She took a picture of everything. It was a great time. We took them up to the cottage, played in the Kayak, did some boating, swimming, had bonfires ahhh, such the life!