Good afternoon! My name is Lauren and I'm a recovering alcoholic/addict. What a beautiful day today, the sun is shining. A year ago, I would still be in bed, hiding my drinking, feeling like crap. Today I have gone to church, made lunch, and now am watching the Bears play or attempt to play. Doing "normal" things. When I first got to AA, I was scared and alone. I felt the people there would look down at me, judge me. That was one of the reasons I didn't want to go to church. I was scared of what people would think of me. That they would think I was a "bad" person. Me saying all those things, was me being judgmental myself. I was judging those who I thought were judging me. How crazy is that! I needed to stop and think. Only God can judge me. I have no control over what people think of me. I can't change that. I can only change how I act, or react to that. But when I got sober, I didn't do it alone. I had a power greater than myself, whom I call God, carry me through the doors. I didn't know what to think at first. Was I going to talk, tell me people about myself? Tell them all my deepest darkest secrets? Were they going to talk to me? Once I heard others talk of their experiences, trials, triumphs, I felt more at ease. These people were like me. Hearing their stories, made me realize that they weren't doing it alone. And I couldn't either. I needed a higher power, God. I always had something that I was "worshiping." Mine at that time was alcohol. I would do anything for it, lie to get it, hide it when I had it, and chose it over you in a heartbeat. Once I stopped worshiping that, I needed to find a power greater than myself, and that is God. So that is where I am today. Finding myself, and finding God. Only with His help, can I stay sober one more day! That's all for today. Have a great one!