Sunday, September 8, 2013

+ It was our one year anniversary yesterday
+ I meant to blog about it
+ I mean to blog about a lot of things, but it's probably never going to happen
+ Kyle built me a blanket fort the other day
+ With lights and everything!
+ He put it together while I was out rafting
+ I'm moving to Utah tomorrow at 4am
+ That's in 5 hours
+ I still haven't packed
+ My room is a mess
+ I have a package for Kirs that has been sitting on my table for a month
+ I skyped with my favourite person, Allie, today
+ She is so fun
+ I need to find a job!
+ I'm going to miss Washington.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

I know I just posted a video, and I hate posting them so close together, but I feel it's necessary this time. Besides, the last one was technically a song and this one you actually have to watch ;) Also: This may seem a little self centered, it definitely feels that way for me, but I think it's important.

I don't think I have low self esteem. I used to love when people would ask for group photos, or funny photos, or any photos really! I mean, I had a fashion blog where we took pictures of ourselves everyday. I don't get embarrassed with karaoke and love to go crazy with Just Dance. I love being on stage. But a couple weeks ago, we were hanging out with some friends when someone gave me a compliment on how cute I was, and I replied with something like "Nah, thanks though!" Kyle turned to her and said "It's hard to give her compliments because she has low self esteem and doesn't see how great she it." I was shocked! What was he talking about?? I don't have low self esteem! It made me stop and think about how I act. Then I watched this video....

...And I realized that that was me. Especially with Kyle, since he's a photographer and is always pointing the camera in my direction. When did that happen?? I mean, our first date was a photoshoot with all eyes on me! When did I start getting so self conscious and stop loving who I am?
I decided to look at myself through different eyes, to see myself as my friends and family see me, and not be so hard on myself. I'm also focusing on accepting the compliments and not putting myself down, since I LOVE compliments (I mean, everyone does, but they're one of my love languages)

After I decided this, someone sent me a message and said they loved the photos of me on the beach!
I had no idea what they were talking about, so I asked them to explain and they sent me a link to Kyle's blog where he sneakily posted photos from our trip to California back in March. I checked them out, and actually liked them! Which sounds horrible that I wouldn't have before, since Kyle took them and they are great, but like I said that's just how I was! So here are a few :)You can check the rest out here if you want.