Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Apropos of Nothing: My Take on 'The Voice', Episode 8

I spent 8 seasons getting sucked into American Idol and finally, finally felt like it was time to let it go this year. It was great. I was getting THREE HOURS of my life back every week (most of which I spent writing, honest).

And then The Voice came along. And I had to watch one episode and BOOM. Sucked in again.

To make me feel a little better about the amount of time that I am now devoting to this show, I think I'm going to use it as blog fodder. Yeah. Cause blogging is writing! Yeah! Uh-huh...(just go with me. Please.)

So today I present, my non-sequitor observations on The Voice, Episode 8.

1. This is probably the best Christina has looked all season. I dug the braids. I did not dig, however, having to constantly ignore my craving for Cheez Doodles. I'm on a diet, X-tina and The Voice spray tanning team. Please have a little respect.

2. Cee Lo's jacket was the article of clothing that kept on giving. First I was like, ooh, sparkles. And then I realized they were multi-colored sparkles. And THEN, I noticed the zipped sleeves with the peekaboo turquoise and teal swatches. I desperately, desperately wanted to see the lining. But, alas, it was not meant to be.

3. Things Nakia probably never thought would happen in his lifetime: appearing on primetime television in a fluffy white bathrobe. While getting an awkward group chair massage. With Cee Lo Green...

4....whose awkward group chair massage ring was the size of his middle finger. Oh to be a celebrity, where you can keep your jewelry on during massages. 'Tis the stuff of dreams, really.

5. Seriously, though, even the out-of-focus aerial cutaway shot from the group massage was awkward.

6. The one-third of the 2-hour show that was devoted to Christina's teary ode to her team. Also her shout-out to one of her own music videos during a critique. Well played, Ms. A.

7. I'm starting to feel like I really know these A-listers. For example, I am now aware that should the opportunity ever arise, I shall be gifting Adam Levine with a dapper sweater to add to his collection.

8. And the million dollar question: Has Carson Daly been replaced by a robot?

And, for no reason at all, here's how I think the eliminations will go next week:
Team Adam
Saved by America: Javier
Saved by Adam: Jeff

Team Cee Lo
Saved by America: Nakia
Saved by Cee Lo: Vicci (who was my fave of the night)

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I'm the author of THREE DAY SUMMER (Simon & Schuster), THE MAPMAKER AND THE GHOST (Bloomsbury), and the upcoming THE GEEK'S GUIDE TO UNREQUITED LOVE. I also blog a lot about things I'm geeking out over. To learn a bit more about me, including how to pronounce my name (!), check out my website.