15 March 09
"Something wasn't natural about them, in addition
to the fact that they weren't natural." -Col. David LeCours,
Vermont Department of Fish and Wildlife chief warden. He was
talking about the antlers bolted onto the skull of a deer by Vermont
dumbass Marcel Fournier, who will spend 10 days in jail for his abject
stupidity.

Mr. Bob Seger, In the song, 'Turn the Page', are you seriously
suggesting that some dude calling you a girl ruins your whole day,
considering that you're a major star that gets laid any time he wants?
Get over it, man.

This link will take you to my ancient ass
website that preceded this'un

-21SEPTEMBER08-
The important thing is this: No matter what your opinions are, no matter
what you say to your friends or co-workers or girlfriends, the time will
eventually come when you will step into that voting booth (unless you
are a heroin addict, a complete asshole, or in this country on an
extended expired visa that never existed). When that time comes,
take a moment after you walk into the booth and just clear your mind, be
relaxed and at ease, and gently push all the bullshit, the media
assault, the unrelenting wave of catchphrases and assholes like me
telling you how retarded you are if you don't see things my way (very)
over a mental cliff.
And then do me and you and every other American and every other person
on this planet a favor: Think of them all in turn, then think of
me again. And then vote your conscience.
It doesn't matter what the hell you say back outside. Your vote is
the business of which is none of mine. Just don't be afraid of
real change, don't be afraid to vote for the guy (and since you are
hopefully voting for the President, not the
Vice-President,
it will be a guy) who you think most wants to see you do
better, and don't be afraid to be surprised when you finally pull that
lever, push that button, or punch out that pesky chad. It's not
often that you see the moment when history took a sharp turn for the
better, even less likely you'll be a direct part of it. Don't
waste this chance to put your hand into the Pool of History and make a
ripple, however small. Do the right thing, vote with your soul,
and when that historic turning point comes, bask in the knowledge that
you were there. The day when nothing would ever be the same again.
In case you don't recognize that feeling you get the next morning, it's
your life opening up a million possibilities that you never noticed
before. And for the first time in a long time, you will know they
are all within your reach.

-08JULY08-

3 OTHER MAVERICKS WHO ARE NOW A JOKE-METALLICA-
THEN: When they were kicking everyone else's asses in rock before Guns
'n' Roses, they told The Man to suck it while they smoked a joint and
drank a pint, then pleasured The Man's women.
NOW: Lars Ulrich sleeps on a giant pile of money, upon which he nightly
dreams of smashing down the door of a 12-Year-Old skate punk and tasing
him before he can hide the copy of Kill 'Em All he burned last week.
He occasionally makes public appearances to shit on his fanbase and see
to it that no other musician on Earth will ever sell a record without
monstrous commercial approval, then sells out in four different ways
walking across his floor carpeted with baby panda bears towards his
bathroom made entirely of gold.

-JESSE JACKSON-
THEN- The guy who held a dying MLK in his arms and beat Al
Gore in the 1988 Democratic Primaries stood as the 'number one darkie'
that white supremacists wanted to get for many years, mainly because he
was badass.

-NOW-
He never met a black person he couldn't turn into a victim, including
Carolina hookers who didn't get raped, and every black American for
slavery, which has not occurred in this country* for nigh on 150 years.

*We're talking about 'Pick that cotton, boy' slavery, not 'Get your ass
back to work welcoming jerks to Wal-Mart, old man' slavery.

-MADONNA-
-THEN-
The Material Girl who started with little talent, no voice, hairy
armpits and a freaky silver lamé jumpsuit became the hottest
non-preaching papa's daughter on Earth by willpower alone.
Interestingly, she founded Maverick Records.
-NOW-
Her last album sounded like the lyrics were written by a 12-year-old
girl who is immature for a 12-year-old, she's hooking up with a stinking
New York Yankee, and she sold Maverick Records to Time Warner, a clearly
evil entity.