Archive for the ‘acting!’ Category

there’s a lot of bad acting going on in stock photography. mostly douchebag creeps with cameras act like photographers to get girls to naked. then, to continue the assault, they publish their soft porn pics and we’re supposed to act like it’s artistic:

Then again, theater is dumb and someone might as well get naked.

Who you callin fairy?

Get some hair plugs, tiger.

Don’t cry, your agent will call any minute I just know it!

Nope, I didn’t rotate the image.

Uhhhhh…

The artist named this “Steve McQueen” and made a snot bubble fly out of his nose. Thanks for those things.

Let’s just go ahead and reinforce that cartoon hobo stereotype. It’s much easier to rationalize the plight of actual humans living on the streets if we constantly picture them as buccaneers laid off by Captain Hook.

Can you spare a bit-part in a Disney movie?

big thanks to @Crachapelle for this spot-on example of useless stock photography – the rest of you should try to be a little more like @Crachapelle

Look, photogs, if you have a bad shot in your reel – DON’T. SELL. IT. No one wants it. Also, sorry kid, but when you grow up and you’re a little-known broadway understudy you’re going to look back at this and … well, you’ll probably be proud of it. Never mind.

That’s a wrap! Great performance, everyone. Thanks for your dedication and hard work in really nailing this elusive emotion. Fortunately, the clown make-up and the little kid punching your face really helped us get into the character. Totally realistic.

“Can you see the surprise on my face as I realistically push this button??” That’s how models “acted” back in the 90’s when this was taken. Oh wait, they still “act” that way – like people who will never be actors.