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Can I have my mustache and still dress up as Captain America for the Avengers premier?

I have a mustache and I really really like it. It's like letting everyone around me know I collect guns without ever having to talk to them. The problem is my girlfriend hates it. She used to complain daily about it but now she's down to like once every few days telling me it makes her want to vomit, so baby steps are better than no steps at all I guess.
So, as you may know the Avengers premier is next week and the AMC theater near my house is doing a big movie marathon starting in the a.m. the day before and showing all of the Avengers characters films, starting with the Hulk, then the two Iron Man films, then Thor, Captain America and at midnight the Avengers premier. I am very excited and am dressing up as Captain America, complete with a real metal shield. I've been worried about the compatibility of the mustache with the costume for a while and recently my girlfriend has started up about how much she hates it and how bad the costume will look if I have a mustache because she knows that's my weakness in the pro-anti mustache debate. I don't want to shave it off for one night even though it only takes like two weeks to grow out again becuase I everyone looks silly in the time between not having a mustache and having one, but mainly because I don't want to give my girlfriend false hope that it will be gone for good if I shave it. I feel like shaving it and growing it back will hurt her more than just keeping it and I'm not shaving it permanently anytime in the near future. Should I leave it and just hope nobody calls me out at the premier or just shave it off?

Your girlfriend hates it and it probably doesn't look anywhere near as good as you think it does. Shave it off.

EDIT: Note that I agree with @admanb and @sentry. I just hate mustaches on most people.

I don't really care what other people think about it, I like it because I think it's cool and that's all the validation I need. I just wish there was some sort of middle ground we could agree on.

What are you expecting? It's a physical thing on your face. It's either there or not. No one cares whether you're Captain America with or without a mustache. If you really don't care what people think about you or your cool mustache, don't shave it off and go as mustached Cap.

Esh on April 2012

"At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Honestly if she doesn't like it and you do that's about where this ends. You can go as a mustachioed Cap'n no problems.

If you have no problem telling her to stuff it, it's your body, that's your prerogative. Seems like this is a more "should I do this for my girlfriend or for me" thread honestly. And again, it's your body.

I've seen catwoman cosplayers with fuller mustaches than mine ever was, and back in college I could turn up the ends in a full Yosemite Sam handlebar or let them hang like a Klingon. Nobody will think twice.

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Proper mustache or goatee maintenance is WAY more work than just clean shaving.

Unless your mustache sucks.

"Well, look at this. Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What's that make us?"
"Big Damn Heroes, Sir."
"Ain't we just."

I'm not one of those people who thinks you should shave a mustache you enjoy for the sake of your girlfriend, so know that I support you Colt45!

If you like your mustache, your girlfriend should learn to deal. This is not some major life decision or some kind of major financial thing, it's a mustache. It's also your face and your body, and as a full beard wearer who does so because I hate to shave, I fully support your right to not do so.

But yeah, I wouldn't worry about going as a mustachioed Captain America. I don't think anyone will care...plus you could go as Tony Stark, I thought that was a great idea.

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Proper mustache or goatee maintenance is WAY more work than just clean shaving.

Unless your mustache sucks.

With a good trimmer and a comb, it's actually very easy to maintain a good beard or mustache...way easier than doing a full lather and shave everyday, especially since you don't have to do it every day.

If costume fidelity matters to you that much then shave it off and grow it back later, but if you don't look much like Steve Rogers (be it the comic book or the movie representations) I'm not sure what the big deal is. My kid dressed up like Cap this Halloween, he's like 35 lbs, half-brown and talks like a toddler; everyone still addressed him as Captain America.

I'm sure your G/F would rather you be moustache-less for a couple days then not.

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Arguing to your girlfriend that you should get to keep your mustache because shaving sucks is a treacherous and stupid path to walk.

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Arguing to your girlfriend that you should get to keep your mustache because shaving sucks is a treacherous and stupid path to walk.

Yeah, she's likely to toss the leg shaving in your face pretty quick.

That said, it's also a treacherous and stupid path to regularly let your girlfriend decide what you do with your face. So there is a balance to be struck.

You've got two good reasons to shave it. Happy girlfriend for a day and more accurate costume. Plus you said you can grow it back quickly.

For future problems, explain to your girlfriend that it's something you really like and/or shaving every day is annoying! Even as a female, she should know shaving SUCKS... it never ends. It's your face, you have to live behind it every day. She only has to look at it. She'll either get used to it or maybe she's not the right girl for you.

Sure shaving sucks, but as a lady I can tell you making kissyface with a dude who has a shitty mustache is way worse. If it's well maintained, trimmed and clean that's fine, but if it's even the slightest bit bristly or coarse, or too long, or god forbid it has foodsmell in it, it's incredibly uncomfortable and gross.

So OP, maybe stop worrying about the costume thing and without being defensive ask your girlfriend why she doesn't like your mustache.

I had a beard for about 8 years and my girlfriend hated it. One day I was trimming and shaping my beard but I slipped and messed up, tried to fix it but couldn't and ended up shaving the whole thing off... took me all of 5 minutes before I realized that my face had changed over the last 8 years and I looked a LOT better without the beard. Anyway, I say shave it for the day, you may end up liking your face without it... and if you don't like it you can always grow it back.

As for the girlfriend, honestly I'd say she really doesn't get a say in the matter. Like I said before my girlfriend hated, HATED, my beard but she never gave me grief about it. If she can't deal with the mustache I'd say let her be mad about it... it's not like a shirt that's easy to change.

I can tell you why she hates it, mustaches look terrible on most people without an accompanying beard or goatee of some sort. If you're not Burt Reynolds, chances are you look terrible with a mustache. That isn't to say if you like it shave it because you look ugly, it's your body.

SO you're saying you love having a mustache because of how that makes people see you, and you're worried about what people might think of you if you mix Captain America and that mustache... But you don't care if your girlfriend hates it, and then you say you don't care what people think?

I don't think you thought this very well. "Looking cool" and "sending messages" about yourself with clothing or grooming or body mods is all about WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK. Also, everything you said is about WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK.

Also, you're giving a very strong "jerk" vibe, just so you know, word of advice.

Anyways, if you really don't care about anyone else, leave the mustache. If you care about their opinions, take it off. That simple.

Just leave it. Shaving it temporarily will likely piss off your girlfriend even more.

But don't pretend keeping your mustache is some noble endeavour in which you tell the world that you don't care what they think. Because almost every post you have made demonstrates how much you do care what these people think. I imagine the reason you keep it on is the same reason many young people grow a mustache. They like the attention it gets them--even negative--and they think it's hilarious that they willingly grow it anyway.

But leave it if you want to leave it. No one but your girlfriend really and truly cares about your facial hair. And you don't seem to care what she thinks anyway.

I guess I am being kind of a jerk about it. I don't care what my girlfriend thinks, but I was thinking about changing myself for complete strangers I'll never see again? While it wasn't my intention that does make it seem like my girlfriend's opinion seem worthless to me.

I do keep it trimmed fairly clean, I just cut it above my lip with scissors about two or three times a week so it doesn't get in the way of kissing and doesn't hang down past the corners of the mouth so i don't look like Hulk Hogan. I've only had it for a month or so so I don't think my face has changed that much since it's been there.

Sorry for being so standoffish earlier, I was in a bad mood already and I felt like there was little advice and mostly just rude criticism when i first posted. I appreciate all of the advice!

I always find it shocking in these kinds of threads the number of people who are like "You should do this because your girlfriend said to". I guess after being married for a decade and now being divorced, I have a very different outlook on giving up your comfort zone to please the whims of someone else, especially when the actual issue is pretty inconsequential in the grand scheme of life.

My opinion is still pretty firm. If you like the 'stache, keep the 'stache. It's your face, it's attached to you 100% of the time...I hope anyway. If you have a detachable face, that might be creepy, and may give your girlfriend some more leverage...like if she's taking your face with her to the mall in her purse or something.

I always find it shocking in these kinds of threads the number of people who are like "You should do this because your girlfriend said to". I guess after being married for a decade and now being divorced, I have a very different outlook on giving up your comfort zone to please the whims of someone else, especially when the actual issue is pretty inconsequential in the grand scheme of life.

My opinion is still pretty firm. If you like the 'stache, keep the 'stache. It's your face, it's attached to you 100% of the time...I hope anyway. If you have a detachable face, that might be creepy, and may give your girlfriend some more leverage...like if she's taking your face with her to the mall in her purse or something.

I feel like something as insignificant as a mustache is something that can and should be an easily changeable factor in a relationship. What if his girlfriend stopped waxing and shaving to his satisfaction? I'm sure he'd be whistling a different tune. If she upkeeps for you, it might be best to acquiesce. But, like the OP said, he doesn't care about her opinions, so maybe this won't matter in the long run anyway as it doesn't seem like a very stable thing.

Esh on April 2012

"At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."

Actually, if his girlfriend came in her saying "I don't want to shave my legs anymore, I think I look badass with leg hair, but my boyfriend hates it, should I shave it just to please him?", I'd be telling her the same thing. Relationship is about compromise, but compromise goes both ways. Compromise is not you always giving your girlfriend/boyfriend what they want, because they want it.

It's obvious he feels strongly about his mustache, so how insignificant we think the situation is, really isn't very relevant. The whole "picking your battles" thing applies to both parties. It just seems like every time a question like this comes up in this forum, certain people seem to be very militant about telling others they should just acquiesce because "if you cared that's what you'd do".

Actually, if his girlfriend came in her saying "I don't want to shave my legs anymore, I think I look badass with leg hair, but my boyfriend hates it, should I shave it just to please him?", I'd be telling her the same thing. Relationship is about compromise, but compromise goes both ways. Compromise is not you always giving your girlfriend/boyfriend what they want, because they want it.

It's obvious he feels strongly about his mustache, so how insignificant we think the situation is, really isn't very relevant. The whole "picking your battles" thing applies to both parties. It just seems like every time a question like this comes up in this forum, certain people seem to be very militant about telling others they should just acquiesce because "if you cared that's what you'd do".

For insignificant things people should acquiesce. If a mustache forms some sort of pillar of who he is, then there are other serious issues at play here.

But we digress...

OP, you probably won't look any more Captain America with or without mustache, so just keep it.

"At first he thought it might be a natural occurrence - maybe a rabbit. But upon closer inspection, it was clear a knife had been used. And rabbits don't carry knives."

I just wanted to say that I love my boyfriend more than anything, with or without his mustache, even if I give him crap about it all the time. (He still incredibly attractive even with a nasty mustache, which is saying a lot)

He's not dressing up as Captain America to impress anyone. He honestly is doing it for himself. He loves him so much. (I even painted him a picture of Captain America right when we first started dating.) He really doesn't care what people think. He's one of a kind.

There. Just picture him with a mustache.

Colt, you can keep your mustache as long as you don't have it the day we get married. I love you and I'm sorry I upset you.