It's the meeting grounds for the emotions of gratitude, longing, celebration, and grace. - Sandra McCracken

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Confessions

1. I want to go home. Which is probably the oddest thing I can say while sitting in my hometown (more or less) in my parents' house, but it's true. The adventure has been fun, and now I'm done. Except that it seems I don't get to make that decision anymore ... I keep thinking of the line from "Cathedrals." "In the cathedrals of New York and Rome there is a feeling that you should just go home and spend a lifetime finding out just where that is." PS My parents have been so good to us. This has nothing at all to do with them - it's all me. Just so you know.

2. I've had the strangest experience as a barista lately. I've been working with my step-brother (my dad's wife's son), and it's the most time I've ever spent with him. My dad and his mom got married about the same time Brian and I got married, so we really have only seen one another at holidays. I don't know if he sees it or not, but the two of us have more in common than I would have ever guessed. It is w-e-i-r-d to realize how much we are like, considering that we share the same relatives, but have never lived in the same house. Very Strange.

3. I am beginning to wear maternity clothes. I don't mind looking pregnant - I'm excited to BE pregnant, so looking the part is ok - but I haven't enjoyed the in-between stage, where you look and think, "Is she pregnant or is she fat?" Fat isn't fun.

4. God has been teaching me lately about Paul and Silas' stay in prison (Acts 16). The most interesting thing about this story is that they chose to stay, even after an earthquake opened the prison doors. God gave them an out, and they chose to stay. Because they did, a). they were let out legitimately, a little while later, and b). in the meantime, an entire household became believers. I don't know what the application of it is, but that feels significant to our lives right now.

5. I'm a little jealous of everyone's adventures. Only a little, though. Boston and New York and Florida and Massachusetts ... it sounds like fun. Meanwhile I'm making coffee, BAKING in the oven known as Montgomery, and waiting to find out where and how I'm going to live. Still.

6. BUT - I have my very own little adventure just around the bend. It's the size of a fist now, about 4 inches long, and next week it will have the ability to suck its thumb. The books say this is impossible, but I swear I've already felt it move. And in about five and a half months, regardless of where we are living or what we are doing, our own little adventure will begin.

Yay.

PS I think we've scratched "Brennan" altogether. It has nothing to do with being phobic - because I'm not - it's just that I like feminine names for girls, and masculine names for boys. I also wouldn't name a girl "Bailey." We have new names that we like, but I think I'm going to hold off on publicly discussing those right now. I'll talk about them privately, though, so if you see me, feel free to ask.

7. A short Slap-Out update: There Is a Snake Living In the Walls of our House. It is a Moccasin, Which is Poisonous. My dad tried to kill it last night, but, when cornered, the snake crawled into a crevice in the wall. Yikes.