30 September 2011

Today? Vermont!

While Doug sprays our fleabag (literally) apartment with cedar oil flea spray that we could eat but smells like funky old rotting buildings, I will be heading to the fine state of Vermont to spend my gas money and snack money somewhere where it counts, and be somewhere I love, and pray to the carseat gods that Della does not cry the whole way there and back.

4 comments:

May you have a big, Vermont-sized epiphany, and a lovely drive out & back. (Come on, Della, give your momma a break and giggle instead of weeping in the car, eh?) Hope you're well, my friend (and hope that the fleas & old building smells) are gone by the time you return. Thinking of you.

Hope Vermont had the desired effect on your wellbeing, and that Della has taken to her carseat.

(Our girls had reflux, and they hated their carseats too because it squished their tummies. They were always very uncomfortable in their carseats, especially after eating. There's hope - they now LOVE going places and will happily sit in their carseats.)

I hope your return home is greeted with fully evaporated cedar oil, and that it did the trick.

About this blog

I started this blog during struggles with infertility--struggles that resulted in countless IUIs, medications, procedures, 5 attempted IVF cycles, 2 pregnancies, one heartbreaking loss, and one miracle baby.

Parenthood left me feeling like I was not sure what to do here, with this amazing community. To talk about parenting felt boastful for those still and forever struggling. To not talk about it felt disingenuous. So here I am. I want to talk about my real life. Parenting. Midlife reassessment. Flailing. Finding myself. Mucking about.

So yes, I am a midlife parent of an amazing child.Yes, I battled infertility and will be forever changed by every single moment of that journey.I am imperfect and life is messy, but it is also so beautiful.

Among many other things, I hope to reconnect to myself through writing here. And I hope to connect with you too. Others out there, parenting maybe later in life. Maybe after struggling. Maybe struggling still. We can all use a safe place and a lot of compassion. That's what I am offering to you. I hope you'll stick around.

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inside out

"The key is, starting from the inside out. Often you say, “I don’t know what to do.” True, you don’t know what to do. There are infinite possibilities. And a bunch of them haven’t worked for you. A lot of them have been tried, and they haven’t worked under what you think are the same conditions. And so, you sort of pace around, you don’t know what to do. Sometimes you don’t even know what you want to have. But you always, you always, if you will stop and think about it, you ALWAYS know how you want to feel."