The Adversary

Jake: Benjamin L. Sisko, it is the judgment of this council that you be reduced in rank to captain.Sisko: But I'm a commander.Jake: Oh, then I guess it's a promotion.Sisko: Woo hoo! Captain at last!Admiral Krajensky: Guess what? You get to invade Tzenkethi space!Sisko: Should I confirm your information?Krajensky: No, no, of course not.

Jadzia: So did you tell Kasidy about your promotion?Sisko: No, she's delivering some weapons to the Demilitarized Zone.Jadzia: You're not worried she's aiding the Maquis, are you?Sisko: No, why would I be?

Eddington: How'd you manage to get promoted?Sisko: Starfleet said they'd promote me if I grew some facial hair.Eddington: I'd like to be a captain, but Starfleet doesn't promote traitors -- uh, security officers.

Faked Transmission: This is definitely not a faked transmission. We've been attacked by the Tzenkethi.Sisko: Send a message to Starfleet -- we have engaged the Tzenkethi.Odo: I can't. Our communication's down.Sisko: Well, that was anticlimatic.

Jadzia: Someone's been sabotaging the Defiant!Sisko: Yes, but who?O'Brien: Well, I saw Bashir playing chicken in the Jeffrey Tubes earlier.Sisko: And he didn't invite me to join him? That is suspicious.

Sisko: All right. Everyone who's not a saboteur take a step back.... Not so fast, Julian.Bashir: Me? I'm not a saboteur!O'Brien: Then where are your sabots?Jadzia: Um, why didn't the Admiral take a step back?Krajensky: That's Admiral Changeling to you.

Sisko: There's a shapeshifter on this ship!Odo: Ahem.Sisko: Two shapeshifters on this ship!Bashir: Ahem.Sisko: You're not a shapeshifter.Bashir: Crap.

Sisko: Looks like the Changeling is trying to start a war between us and Tzenkethi.Kira: We've got to stop him! From now on everyone who isn't the Changeling needs to say the secret passcode.Jadzia: What's the secret passcode?Kira: "I'm not the Changeling! Honest!"Sisko: Instead, why don't we just confine everyone to quarters?Eddington: Shucks. And I had so many dimes too.

Bashir: I drugged Dax so much she's not going to be any use to anyone.Sisko: Well, you did your best, Doctor.Bashir: You remember what you said about me not being a Changeling?Sisko: Yes. What about it?Bashir: Nothing. Just wondering.

Eddington: You should put yourself in the place of the Changeling. Where would you hide?Odo: Somewhere near a redshirt...Redshirt: (over the comm) Hey, look! It's the Changeling! GAK!Odo: ...and Sisko.Sisko: (over the comm) Die, Changeling scum! OW!Eddington: I meant realistically.

Bolian: Kira's the Changeling!Kira: No, I'm not! Bolian's the Changeling! He doesn't even have a real name!Bolian: Rabbit season!Kira: Duck season!Sisko: If you two don't shut up, I'll bleed on you.

Bashir: Blood tests. Yay!Bolian: Ha! I may not have a name, but I'm not a Changeling.Kira: Ha! I'm not a Changeling either.Eddington: Ha! I'm also not a Changeling!Bashir: Yes, you are.Eddington: Crap.

Eddington: "I'm not the Changeling! Honest!"Kira: Ha! Not falling for that one.Bashir: Help me, I'm trapped in the brig.Bashir Changeling: See? I was a Changeling!Sisko: Just how many times have Changelings tried to be like you, Doctor?Bashir: It is quite an ego boost, but I don't think one could ever replace me on a semi-permanent basis.

Odo: Before we fight, there is something you should know: I am not left-handed.Changeling: And there is something you should know: I don't have a left hand.Odo: Oh yeah? Well, I don't have a left arm!Changeling: Well, I don't have a left leg either!Odo: Then it should be really easy to push you onto the warp core.Changeling: Crap.

Captain's Log: If a changeling dies from radiation poisoning, does it make a sound?

Sisko: So it turns out nothing established at the beginning of this episode really happened.Eddington: Including your promotion?Sisko: They said they'd honour it if I shaved my head.Odo: Sorry to interrupt, but the Changeling told me something just before he died.Sisko: What's that?Odo: GAK!Sisko: Oh, that was insightful.
(Sisko shaves his head at Ludicrous Speed.)