Breastfeeding issues

06-19-2009, 06:58 PM

Hi, everyone I am new here. I have been reading about Aware parenting and Attachment parenting and both have very simular concepts, but I am confused on the nursing part. My daughter is strictly breastfed and she sometimes uses it to keep from crying. I have read you shouldn't distract them from their need to cry even by nursing. But I also have read that nursing can be a great way to calm your baby...I'm so confused! By the way my daughter is 2 months old and she has had a very rough start. Very difficult delivery that caused injury to her head. Cranial sacral therapy has helped her heal physically but I am wondering if she needs to cry to heal emotionally. Any suggestions will help

I don't know much about 'Aware Parenting' but would always offer the breast to a crying infant.
'Aware Parenting' sees crying as a way to heal trauma and release stress. I also see crying as sometimes for that reason... but.......it is also a way for a young baby to say "I am very hungry, feed me" or "I enjoy the feeling of nursing and I would like you to help me do that now".

Comment

The problem with letting her nurse when she just wants comfort is that she just spits it all up and then cries because of that. She is 9 weeks old and has only been nursing for 3 weeks before that she would just scream if I tried to nurse her. Hopefully she will get passed it when the newness wears off. Thanks for your advice, I will see what happens because letting her cry when she wants to nurse for comfort isnt working either!

Comment

it can be very frustrating when you can't figure out why your baby is crying! i had the same issue w/my 2nd, that he would nurse for comfort, but then vomit and get more upset! what helped somewhat w/him was lying down to nurse. your let down is less strong this way and allows them to be able to take in the milk a little more slowly. so sometimes comfort nursing would help. that is what we as mothers do instinctively. i suppose it's possible that if he's continuing to cry after you have done all you can, maybe he does have some tension crying to do. put him in a sling and walk, bounce, rock, sing to him, let him know you're there. some mothers have found swaddling a great source of help to their babies, too.

Comment

I was also going to suggest The Continuum Concept! It has given me so much more insight into my instincts.

My opinion is that the breast should be offered - it's important for nutrition and comfort, both. I don't believe that you can "make" your baby take the breast or that she will take it if it's not what she wants. And, I believe that if she needs to cry and doesn't need to nurse, she will find a way to cry!

So, please try to take comfort in offering her what she may want (breast, diaper, just being in arms, etc), and, if it turns out that isn't what she needs, supporting her while she cries.

The only way to know what your daughter needs is to respond to her and be with her. It sounds like you are trying to guess whether she needs to nurse or needs to cry, and that is just going to be impossible to do!

Continue to trust your instincts and you and she will continue to grow together and get this communication thing all figured out!

Comment

i have found a very good article for you that will help clarify some of the differences between aware parenting and attachment parenting. you will need to sign up for the Attached Family e-zine to read it, but it's called "Crying and Comfort".