That inconvenient truth hasn’t stopped conservatives and anti-feminists from using this supposed victimization to bash a movement that won women the rights to vote, have credit cards, not be legally raped by their husbands, use birth control and generally be considered people instead of property, among other things.

But denying that women are a victimized class is simply wrong. What else would you call a segment of the population who are systematically discriminated against in school, work and politics? How would you describe a population whose bodies are objectified to the point of dehumanization? Women are harassed, attacked and sexually assaulted with alarming regularity in America and around the world, and now even more of them live in states where, if pregnant, they can be refused medical attention or arrested for refusing C-sections.

People who are on the shit end of oppression are oppressed. Accurately describing this is not a matter of politics, but of truth.

But because we live in a culture that values independence and strength and negates the agency of victims – wrongly conflating victimhood with weakness instead of directing our opprobrium at those who victimize – the label will automatically have detractors. No one likes to be a victim, let alone conceive of themselves that way (no matter what George Will believes). But when women refuse to admit to ourselves that we’re systematically victimized, we give fuel to those on the political right who claim – despite all evidence to the contrary – that women are doing just fine.

Actually, the conservative rhetoric of late around rolling back women’s rights is mostly about women’s “independence”: we don’t need coverage for birth control, we choose the pay gap, we’re too strong for legal protections. (Of course this interest in women’s agency disappears when they’re discussing abortion, of which women are supposedly perpetual victims and in need of the most condescending laws on the books.)

If we’re unwilling to accept women’s factual status as victims in society, it makes it that much harder for society to accept those who hurt women as victimizers.

There’s a reason men like ESPN’s now temporarily-suspended Stephen A Smith say that women who are beaten need to “do your part” and avoid “elements of provocation”. As anti-violence educator and filmmaker Byron Hurt explained in Ebony, it’s because “[t]his deflection never fails. Men create excuses for their abusive behavior and deny women’s victimhood.”

Clearly there are women – for a myriad of reasons – who don’t want to identify as victims or support the idea that women are victimized. Maybe there are even a lucky few who have never experienced discrimination. But as a college professor once told me, the existence of a few women who have lived their lives under an umbrella of privilege does not mean that it’s not raining on the rest of us.

Naming what is happening to women – that we are being oppressed, held back, and yes, victimized – is not weakness. It takes strength to tell uncomfortable truths.