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Author
Topic: Tested Positive Today (Read 8482 times)

I just tested positive today. I am in such disbelief i guess the shock hasn't fully hit me yet. Although i did cry at first and upon telling my mom and dad and sister I know that I need to be strong and fight this just like you all are. i was so afraid before of knowing my results but i kinda feel a sign of relief. Its better to know now and receive treatment to get healthy again. I am confused as to my test results. My WBC count is 2.9, i have no idea what this mean but i know that it is low. I am going to see my ID next Wednesday and will learn more about this. Would greatly appreciate any support.

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

I'm sorry you've joined us but glad you found us all the same. So welcome!

The first thing I would tell you is that everything is going to be OK. Receiving a positive diagnosis is no small thing so the confusion and distress you're feeling right now is perfectly normal.

Before getting into the nitty gritty of numbers and lab results, I'd encourage you to read our Lessons section (click the red text) which provides basic information you need to know in a straight forward manner.

If you have any questions or concerns, you can post them here and we'll do our best to help you out.

Welcome Live, and like Matty I'm sorry there is a need for you to be here.

Disbelief is part of it, and in time you will adjust to the situation and things will soon return to normal for you, I promise things will get better. It's good to see that you told your Mom, father and sister right out of the gate as they can be an integral part of your support network.

And of course you have many friends here

I cant really comment on your WBC, but as you say when you see your ID doc next weds you will get a better picture of where you are in this. But regardless as to where you are, things will be just fine.

Welcome to our forums. I'm sorry about you diagnosis, but glad that you have found us. Right now you'll just need to adjust to these news and to the changes that you may have to make to ensure good health in all respects. Don't worry too much at this very moment about the WBC; you will see that everything is going to be fine. You're probably going to have some additional blood work completed in order to obtain your viral load and CD4 count. We will be here if you have any questions or concerns.

Best,

Da Rev.

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"I have tried hard--but life is difficult, and I am a very useless person. I can hardly be said to have an independent existence. I was just a screw or a cog in the great machine I called life, and when I dropped out of it I found I was of no use anywhere else."

I was diagnosed 6 weeks ago and this site was a huge help for me both socially and research wise. I must have read every thread on here trying to learn anything and everything that might help me understand more about my life after diagnosis. You sound like you have tackled some big hurdles already by telling your family and developing a support system. That is really great to hear.

Well since I'm new also, and probably going through many of the same emotions, feel free to ask me or contact me about anything! Take care and keep us posted!

Hi LL83-Glad you found the Forums and Welcome -though it is a painful experience that brought you here - hopefully, you will be able to find some relief, support and comfort from knowing that you are not alone.

You will have a lot of different things going on the next few weeks or so - getting your labs, getting information overload, getting adjusted to being positive, etc.

Just know that you have people who have walked many of the paths that you are about to walk - so don't be afraid to ask questions - and sort through the answers that you get. You will find new friends on here - and even added family.

Look forward to hearing more from you. And feel free to use the emoticons above liberally Welcome again!-Phil

Welcome to the forums . There are no words to make you feel better today but rest assured there are many people here to support you through this tough time . Let us know what you need and we will be there for you .

Thanks for the support everyone. Im just having difficulty coping, can't sleep at all. Im just worried and hoping i haven't developed AIDS yet. My health has been in a sharp decline all year long.it wasn't until now that I have health insurance that i was able to be diagnosed. I have already lost about 30 pounds and just feel very fatigued and sick all the time. any suggestions?

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

Thanks for the support everyone. Im just having difficulty coping, can't sleep at all. Im just worried and hoping i haven't developed AIDS yet. My health has been in a sharp decline all year long.it wasn't until now that I have health insurance that i was able to be diagnosed. I have already lost about 30 pounds and just feel very fatigued and sick all the time. any suggestions?

Yup. I suggest you see a doctor.

You need to get some blood tests done. In particular a viral load (which measures the amount of virus in your blood) and a CD4 count - which gives an idea of what state your immune system is in.

Now a single set of tests won't tell you a great deal, you need to have a few tests done over a few months to build up a picture of what is really happening. But it's important to get the process underway. Your ID doctor should start doing that when you see him/er next week.

Losing weight, feeling sick and fatigued all the time are not good things and they are issues which many of us deal with. But don't panic. You aren't going to drop dead tomorrow. Take things at a careful pace. Managing HIV can be a complicated ride.

Most of all don't be spooked by terms like "AIDS". It's just a clinical label applied by health care professionals, it doesn't define who you are or mean you're gonna die like Tom Hanks in that fucking awful movie he made about 20 years back.

Thanks for the support everyone. Im just having difficulty coping, can't sleep at all. Im just worried and hoping i haven't developed AIDS yet. My health has been in a sharp decline all year long.it wasn't until now that I have health insurance that i was able to be diagnosed. I have already lost about 30 pounds and just feel very fatigued and sick all the time. any suggestions?

Best thing you can do is exactly what you are doing now --- talk to supportive people, get your labs done, follow up with your doctors recommendations - don't stress over things that are out of your control. If you have support groups where you are - you may want to get involved with those - in regards to sleep, try to do some relaxation exercises to ease your mind a bit before bed (slow breaths, comfortable music, guided imagery - put yourself in a peaceful, comfortable state of mind).

But, you are handling your business - you are doing what you are supposed to do - so try to get some comfort in knowing that. Don't worry about things today that you don't need to worry about today - try not to project what tomorrow is going to bring - and find some things to laugh about ----I'm not trying to be "flippant" but in addition to reading some of the lessons on here, read some of the other threads, you will find little pieces of humor in many of them that hopefully will show you that life does go on and that we do actually find things to laugh about in spite of....keep a positive (no pun intended) attitude - it goes far.

Thanks for the support everyone. Im just having difficulty coping, can't sleep at all. Im just worried and hoping i haven't developed AIDS yet. My health has been in a sharp decline all year long.it wasn't until now that I have health insurance that i was able to be diagnosed. I have already lost about 30 pounds and just feel very fatigued and sick all the time. any suggestions?

Its only natural to worry, but no matter what your first numbers reveal you will be fine. I just got my first labs back and I only had a cd4 count of 73. It was really scary because of what I had read, but my doctor reassured me that regardless of numbers you can recover and build them back up, and go on to live a long life just as if your numbers had been higher. The most important thing is to stay positve, oh and you may want to write down all of these questions you have floating around so you can ask your Dr during your first visit. I went in with a huge list, but it was so helpful

heya! And welcome! And it's stupid to say "don't worry." Of COURSE you will worry. But try not to let it get the better of you. Matty is your friend. Trust Matty. He might use more swear words than a battalion of soldiers, but no one will ever have your back like he will.

Also, he knows as much science and HIV related stuff as Newt. And that says something.

What you need is to know the specifics of your status. Your CD4 count, your viral load, your percentages. Here at AidsMeds we do have terrific learning sections, called LESSONS, which can help you understand all of this.

One set of labs does not mean an awful lot. What you will need is a trend, over time. This is not a disease you get on Tuesday and are dead by Friday. This is a chronic thing you must learn to live with, for a long long time.

Not a sprint, but a marathon.

Welcome to the race. I am sorry you had to come here, but glad you found the best site on the internet for true stuff.

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"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

Well yesterday may well be one of the worst days of your life! With that said today is a new day and things are going to get better! All of us have been where you're at, we felt the shock and fear you are experiencing. You really have two options here... "Half empty or half full" by that I mean you can accept this is happening and you cannot change it, regroup, get the help you need and move on or you can spiral in a dark place of self pity... The second option is not where you want to be! You have found a great place here with lots of people who will help you get through this, and you will get through!

Until you get you first set of numbers you will naturally be worried and questioning. Just try to stay calm, ask questions and read, read, read! This site has so much information it will overwhelm you for awhile, but the more you learn about HIV (today, not in the 80's) you will learn you are OK!

Your concerns about already having AIDS is one we all had as well. Regardless of if you do or don't, the important thing is you are on your way to getting better! The medications available today can change everything. (There are many on this forum that can tell you personal stories of single digit CD4 counts and are still here to tell you about them!)

A word of advice my doctor gave me when I went in for my fist blood draw was, "Don't worry, regardless of the numbers it's all fixable"... And it is!

>I have already lost about 30 pounds and just feel very fatigued and sick all the time. any suggestions

The weakness arises due to - constant diarrhoea - when the virus ravages the GALT(Gut associated lymphoid tissue) and reduces the Tcell load there, deleterious anaerobic bacteria multiply to the detriment of the host, resulting in the body trying to "flush" out the toxins and the bacteria, with loose motions/stools. As well as, the weakness is due to loss of protein from the body, in an effort to produce interferons and antibodies against the virus. The protein is directly taken from the muscle tissue if it's not replenished from dietary sources.

There's growing evidence that a) Colonic cleansing and colonic irrigation helps in getting rid of the anaerobic bacteria; However, one must stay hydrated.b) Certain dietary changes MAY be helpful: A protein rich diet coupled with vitamin C rich foods boosting the Immune system to produce antibodies(made of proteins) to neutralize the virus copies - it should partially help you regain some strength. A diet high in Omega 3 fats which helps the Immune system is also very helpful and according to my textbook, principles and practices of Clinical Immunology, Green tea has a component called epigallocatechin 3-Gallate, a fusion inhibitor molecule(that has been isolated by a german firm from what I read in a research paper, for clinical phase trials) that renders many copies of the virus unable to latch on to Tcells... Plenty of research exists on EGCG in green tea that interferes in the virus fusion entry.

Should you want, there are also REALLY good research trials going on for better medications and anti-HIV therapies... Let me know if you'd like to participate in those and I shall forward you the information to sign up.

Apart from that, meds are obviously what are going to help you feel a lot better.But as you have specified, you are waiting for your appointment with the ID - and the genotyping of the virus and labs come in in about 2 weeks, and your question was very specific, what could be done meanwhile as you feel so weak while you have no access to medications(if I understood right)?

There are plenty of answers on this website to keep yourself informed! First of all, welcome to this community - and everything will gradually make sense. You are now in good hands. Good people here, good doctors and health care!

I'm really glad you found the forums. There are some amazing people here who will gladly walk with you through the often bewildering and emotional days that come post-diagnosis, and they're on here night and day. Just to reiterate what other shave said: you are doing the right things. You found the courage to get tested. You're reaching out for support. You're trying to learn more about what it means to have a virus like HIV.

I wouldn't even be thinking about clinical trials and that sort of stuff right now. Rather, do what the others have said and just take this one step at a time. It really does get better and proper medical care makes a huge difference.

You may find that you have lots of questions these days and for some time to come. Keep a little pad and pen with you all the time so that you don't have to depend on your memory when you speak to your doctor. Developing a good partnership with your doctor is one of the best tools you will have for staying healthy.

You're always welcome here to ask questions and to talk about anything that's on your mind.

I just did my labs today so should get my results in two weeks. I will keep everyone posted. I have a quick question about fatigue. I was just hired for a job today and would like to know what helps with fatigue. I have yet to start any medication yet so just would like some advice on combating fatigue.

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

I have a quick question about fatigue. I was just hired for a job today and would like to know what helps with fatigue. I have yet to start any medication yet so just would like some advice on combating fatigue.

In regards to fatigue - if your doc puts you on meds (based on your labs and your decision) once adjusted that will usually help a lot with fatigue.... otherwise, some things I do (not all consistently, but fairly routine):1) Get at least 7 hours sleep a night2) Limit caffeine intake (I limit it to 2 cups of coffee in the AM)3) Avoid recreational drugs (the crash can make fatigue worse)4) Limit alcohol consumption (I love my Coronas - but try to limit my major intake of them to weekends - when I can get extra rest)5) Plan down time during your day (a few minutes of relaxation at work -while still getting the job done) and wind down time when I get home

These are things that help me -- also, getting in tune with your body and knowing when it is time to get extra rest.

I too am sorry that you've joined us, but know that you can find support here. My advice would be to take things slowly. Read the lessons on this site but don't go overboard looking up everything on the internet (That will cause way too much stress, and there is a lot of crap information out there). You've received a lot of good advice so far and you might want to slowly add a little bit of light exercise everyday (walking is good, walking with someone is even better). Don't fall for vitamin and herb scams either. Talk with your doctor and they will probably recommend a good multi-vitamin. Find ways to treat yourself well to reduce stress.

A portion of my labs are back! Unfortunately my CD4 is already at 156. I was very disappointed with this number as i figured my CD4 wasn't that low yet as this is a new infection. I was prescribe Atripla but when I went to fill out my prescription the pharmacy informed me that my insurance does not cover it and i would have to pay $1600 monthly for it!!! I live in Florida and just started a job today but am unsure if I will be keeping the job since I have been feeling extremely weak. Can anyone advise any good programs to help with my prescriptions/medical expenses. Thank you

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

livelife:Contact your local health department - they administer the ADAP (AIDS Drug Assistance Program) - while there is a waitlist right now - with levels below 200 they should make your case a priority --- I believe that is one of the criteria here for getting around the list.

Dis your ID Dr prescribe you any other medications? With your CD4 count you should be on Bactrim until you are over 200 for a few months.

The tiredness could be down to many reasons. The HIV infection itself makes some people tired, worry and depression can also cause it especially when first diagnosed and you have so many worries going through your mind. Importantly however, tiredness can be caused by infections / illnesses. Either the more serious type or even simple infections. I hope you discussed this with your ID Dr. To give an example, I recently spent a few weeks feeling so tired I could barely function. It was eventually put down to a stomach bug which cleared itself and I was back to normal within days. Tiredness was also the first symptom of PCP when I had it. If the tiredness continues be sure to discuss it with your ID Dr.

I hope you get your meds sorted out quickly. You'll be amazed at how fast you start to improve. I still refer to my meds as my little magic pills.

Agreed littleprice, the dr should have you on Bactrim or a similar med to keep you protected. I personally had a bad reaction to Bactrim and switched to Dapsone, but I understand it isn't as effective as Bactrim.

LiveLife you will be amazed at how much better you will feel after meds. I was like you I really didn't feel bad other than a cough and occasional fevers. However now that I've been on meds for over a month I feel fantastic. Its like I'm a new person, and I look back and question why I just accepted feeling bad as normal... if you are anything like me you just forgot what feeling healthy was like. I know for my last year I was not only fatigued but also just lifeless. My sense of humor was gone, my friendships suffered, and my work really lagged. So hopefully you will also have this happen once on meds and you will be able to rediscover yourself and what it feels like to be alive

Keep up the good attitude and you know you can always come to us if you need anything

Thanks for the advice everyone. So I have sent all my paperwork to ADAP and awaiting to see what happens. I'm not sure why by Doctor did not give me Bactrim or any other antibiotic yet. He did tell me that one good sign is that my percentage was at 18% and with my CD4 was not that bad. I have another doctors appointment on Monday to discuss some labs that weren't back yet and to see the results of some chest/lung X-Rays so I'll keep you posted.

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

So I have submitted all my paperwork for ADAP, and was placed on a waiting list. I also applied to a program from Atripla to receive Atripla while I'm on the waiting list. I was given a one month supply of Atripla for free so I will start today. Hopefully the side effects won't be too bad.

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.

Hey Livelife:Here is a link to the Department of Health (Florida) ADAP Wait List page - if you notice, they say that you can have your case manager request a medical review to see if you can get around the wait list -- check it out.... with your count being what it is, you should be able to get prioritized. Glad to see that you submitted the forms and that you got a 30-day supply.... I'm in Miami area (used to be up in Lauderdale) so, if you are in these parts and need additional info let me know.

quick question how do I add my CD4 and viral load info on the bottom of my profile?

1) Click on you screenname2) Go to Modify Profile3) Go to Forum Profile Information4) Once there, scroll down to where it says "Signature" and type in any info you want to always appear at the bottom of your posts (such as CD4 counts, etc.)

Let me know if you have any questions or if anything above is not clear enough...

First day taking Atripla. Wow i was extremely dizzy today in the morning so much so that I could barely make it out of bed. I took it at 9pm last night on an empty stomach. The vivid dreams actually were not unpleasant so I can't complain. Hopefully I will have better luck tonight with my next dose.

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Sometimes you have to give up the life you've plan and find the life that's waiting for you.