Sept. 27-08

Yesterday wasn’t so bad. Adam came in and apologized for what he did. He gave me a massage and tried to ease my pain. After the massage, I allowed him one day without me trying to get away. I think he was very thankful. Afterward, instead of falling asleep, he cuddled me into his chest and ran his hands through my hair. It was nice… As I lay there, I tried to keep my tears to myself because I knew he wouldn’t like it. But, when a couple accidentally slipped out, he didn’t hurt me. He simply shushed me and pulled me closer. I wonder what made him change so much. Oh! He also went out of the motel again because he brought back my favorite fast food, Burger King. I couldn’t believe he went outside of the hotel just for me. He doesn’t usually do this kind of thing. I wonder what the occasion was… It makes me nervous. Maybe he did it just to be nice? Possibly. Either way, I’m not sure that I like it. I have about forty-five minutes until Adam gets off work. Maybe I could try writing another letter to Marion. Ok, so, here goes nothing. Dear Marion, Holas Bestie! It’s been a weird couple of days. First, Adam gave me a massage. Then, he brought me BK. And finally, when I started crying, he didn’t hurt me. Maybe he’s changing… Ha! I can hear you right now cussing up a blue streak, telling me that I need to quit day dreaming. He can’t, and won’t, change. I need to learn that… It’s just hard for me to accept it. Maybe if I had you here to pound some sense into me I’d be better off. Are you any better? Oh!! I forgot to ask Adam about the specialist! Don’t worry, I’ll ask him today. Bestie, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way but, I really have nothing more to say. Other than I miss you and Rina. Oh… And I was meaning to ask you about this before I left but, who was that guy I saw you with the other day? I mean… He looked like he was all over you! And you just let him! Was he forcing you like Adam is me? Nah.. He couldn’t be… Right? Tell me I’m right… I just can’t bear to think about you going through what I am. I mean, you’ve been like my little sister for years! If something like that was going on, you would have told me before. Right? That’s pretty much all I needed to ask. I’ll write more later. Love you, Rainii. So, there’s my letter to Marion. It’s not long but it’s what I wanted to say for the day. Not much time left until Adam gets home. Home. That’s a word I haven’t used in weeks. When did I start thinking of this as my home? Maybe it was after one of my many times trying to escape. Adam pulled me close and covered my mouth. He told me that this was my new home now so I had better get used to it. I guess I did. Oh well… I keep getting distracted so there’s no way I’m going to get much more writing done because Adam will be back soon. I’ll write more tomorrow. Bye! -R.E.