I suppose an apology for disappearing on you guys and gals is a start! I’m sorry, but life really carried my summer away from me. Writing this post is challenging for me for a number of reasons. First and foremost, because I can’t apologize enough and in a way that expresses how truly sorry I am for pulling a Houdini on you all, but also because I have real reservations regarding how much I feel comfortable sharing in such a public forum – even with all of you.

While my desire to read and blog about the books I’ve read has never diminished, my personal life has been in a state of upheaval as of late that made reading or blogging at all a difficult task.

It’s funny how we humans become so enmeshed in our routines that we fail to realize when things are falling apart around our ears. My life seemed ideal enough from the outside looking in, but it became apparent to me over time that my situation was no longer sustainable or fair to subject myself to any longer.

What followed in the months since has been to date the greatest trial of my life. My resilience has been tested, as well as my mettle to remain convicted to a decision that would impact me emotionally and financially as well.

I won’t lie and say it hasn’t been rough. One chapter of my life has drawn to a close, and I’m standing before a blank page now, completely terrified of what’s to come. Starting over at 29 years old is more than a little intimidating, but I can’t allow fear to stop me from moving forward.

I’m also incredibly blessed in that I have a very strong support network surrounding me through all of this. It’s when we’re tested that we realize who truly has our backs, and I can’t express enough gratitude to all of my friends, family members and fellow bloggers who have reached out or checked in on me, or offered me a kind word in the last few months. You’re angels, all of you.

So, I suppose the biggest question left is where we go from here?

I’m busting back into the blogosphere this week – albeit slowly. I’m shying away from buddy reads for awhile, and just going to gravitate towards the stuff that calls to me in order to really force myself back into the habit of reading regularly again.

This week I’ve got a review upcoming for Needful Things by Stephen King, so keep your eye out for that.

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46 thoughts on “Blog Update | Apologies and other Explanations”

Hey I am many years ahead of you (notice the omission of age and number) and I have been ghosted by the guy I love and I am starting all over again in personal life and in other places. So don’t worry, you are light years younger to me. It is difficult and rough but the end does not come till the fat lady sings and then we croak…
Time is progressive for us humans but apparently it is linear.. So don’t measure via time and distance. Live today. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is a myth, just an English word. So now is the time to start breathing and living again. Hope I made sense.
It is difficult, I cry nights, I don’t sleep and I don’t think my eyes dance. But I still want to get over this and start anew…
Again, I may not be very good at expressing but I hope I could express it here.

I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through something similiar to me. Starting all over again as a grown adult was not where I saw my life 10, 5 or even 2 years ago.

I think you’ve got a good perspective on things that I’m really trying to adapt. Living for today is a big part of my life’s mantra right now. It’s all I can really do because thinking about anything else is really overwhelming for me. Sending you hugs via the internet right now. ❤

Hey Bentley, I had wondered where you had got to, but I know that we all have day to day life to deal with and sometimes the things that we have to deal with are big and take a while. I am sorry to hear that you’ve been through a tough time. I know someone else, of a similar age to you, who is also starting with a blank state and he is finding his feet a little more every day.
It’s so good to see you back and I look forward to your review.

Thank you so much. I hope I find my feet soon – or at least some stable ground to stand on. Life is tough, but I’m planning on getting back into blogging and not neglecting my favorite hobby for a moment longer.

I’m so happy to see you’re back but completely understand your situation. I myself go dormant for weeks/months on end when life just takes… a turn. And I want you to know that we will ALWAYS welcome you back with open arms. Blogging is a hobby unless your making all your income from it and therefore I have the mindset of “If you need to take time away from it, do it.” Don’t let others make you feel bad about putting yourself first because that is the best thing you can do. I’m sorry it seems you’ve had some up and downs over the last few months but I’m happy to see you are doing better and more grounded.

I wondered where you went and I am so sorry ((hugs)). Starting over is always the hardest thing to do. Looking forward to your review of Needful Things!! I have been watching Castle Rock on Hulu and they keep putting shots of the store in whenever they can.

bentley, i am so sorry to hear that the last few months have tried you so much. i really admire your strength and resolve in making it through and having the ability to start over ❤ you are so amazing. i'm so glad you're back but you shouldn't feel badly or beat yourself up for your absence – it sounds like it was the healthiest prioritization for you, and i'm of the opinion that blogging shouldn't feel like an overwhelming responsibility. anyway. so happy to see your name in my feed. i hope you're doing as well as possible, and i and probably 800,000 others are here if you need anything ❤

I am sorry that you had a rough Summer
Also I started following you only a short time before you stopped blogging, I confess that I stalked your blog a few times to see if you’re back and I am glad you are.
Also hope that life gets better for you know?
You know what is good about reaching the bottom? There is no way to go but up ❤

Well I certainly understand the need for time and space away from the blog to process and deal with life’s obstacles. But we did miss ye something fierce. Stay strong and continue to be awesome. Arrr!
x The Captain

Firstly, I’m so glad to hear you are okay (ish) and to see you back. What’s truly hard about this community is that you grow so close to people you don’t know, that you get nervous when they disappear. You want to make sure they’re okay. So for that, thank you so much for writing this post. You’re a wonderful human being so it’s great to have you return.

I’m not gonna pretend to know what you’re going through, but on some level I may understand. Some terrifying and surreal changes happened in my life last year; it wasn’t until this year, shortly after I turned 27, that I realized I would be starting anew all over again. It’s a big thing…but I CAN tell you that I’m realizing that I needed it. It was so hard but I’m finally seeing the good now. If you ever need or want to reach out, here’s one person (and most likely so many more) that you can reach out to.

I’m so sorry to have disappeared. I felt so awful the entire time I was away, knowing that people must be wondering where I had gone off to.

I’m sorry you’ve been through a similar rebirth/renewal as I’ve just gone through. It can be so stressful, but I’m glad to know that you made it through it – is it’s proof that I will survive this time in my life.

Hey now, no sorry’s needed. I’m glad you took the time you needed away. Sometimes we need that and people don’t know how to do that.

It’s okay, and thank you; you’re very sweet 🙂 And you will, I know it. Again, if you ever need someone to chat with, let me know – you can always email me. It’s crazy how connected we all get yet I’ve never met any of you yet 🙂

Making a decision to start over again is a hard thing to do so I admire you for that. Sometimes it is needed though. Career wise I am looking at a start over once I decide to try and find a job again. Not quite there yet (and feeling incredibly blessed I have the time). In any case I hope things will settle properly for you now and you can continue to build. Glad to see you back.

Starting over is so hard to do. I was scared to get on with it, and now I’m scared all the time during it. I know it’s for the best though. I wish you all the best with your own new beginnings when you start the job hunt!

Welcome back!! Sorry for being so late to check this post… but I am so glad to have you back here and was kind of wondering whatever happened to you… I am so sorry the last couple of months have been rough for you… hope things will be on the up from here!

Wow. YOU’RE BACK! I tried reaching you but you just vamooshed from the face of social media. I thought you weren’t even coming back! I’m sorry you had to go through some tough stuff but I’m glad that you didn’t let it destroy you 😊 I’d love to see what changes you’re intending for your blogging (and support any decision you make)! As a viking story once said, Ond Eldr. Breathe Fire!

It’s TOTALLY ok, pal! I absolutely get it, sometimes I want to delete all my social media even without any life-changing event. Here’s to better things and people down this new road you’ve embarked on!