Category Archives : Shut Up and Take My Money

The Japanese inventors of this new health gadget insist that you need to regularly exercise your face with an overpriced wobbly spanking paddle to prevent it sagging. Currently being advertised at an MTR station near you, fitness freaks will be relieved to learn that the ‘Facial Fitness Pao‘ is finally available in Hong Kong.

Definitely not bullshit

Who knew that jamming a HK$990 propeller into your cake hole every day for 30 seconds would restore “youthful expressions that brim with confidence”? This promotional video proves its effectiveness because science and graphs…

Roll up ladies! Whilst the gents are enjoying their Groupon Tenda eggs, the company now presents a new thing for womankind to get paranoid about. As well as being too fat and probably too hairy, Groupon agrees that your vagina is SHIT, and clearly needs a rigorous bleaching. So shut up and peroxide that punani, fade your front bum and decolourise your kitty for the special one-time price of $199 with Lactacyd Intimate Natural Protection…

Ever wish your tights came with a higher level of encryption? Do you lament your current stocking’s resistance when using them to cut through the meat? For better every day colorful, you need Tianzi™ stockings no.6104 which cut seamlessly through the meat…

What sorcery is this? Hong Kong is one of the few places in the world where one can purchase self-freezing iced Coca Cola from a machine. The technology is called supercooling. Known vending machine locations include the Star Ferry and Ocean Park.