Listen, we’re not here to judge: Every kid is different, and it’s those differences that make them special! And sure - you probably maybe wanted to stay away from eating a thousand bananas while they were in utero, but how were you to know that your all-consuming love for this tropical fruit would manifest into a banana baby?! Nobody had any science on that! You just thought you were filling your bod with a nutrient-rich potassium fruit that could propel you on a 100 mile bike ride…nobody told you that eating 20 a day was going to turn your newborn into one of Chiquita’s finest!

But now that this is the hand those cards have dealt you, it’s time to roll with it! First things first - hope you like living near the equator, because this little guy cannot be in temps that are similar to a refrigerator! Most people find out the hard way that bananas are a tropical fruit and therefore turn brown in the cold, but if they’re smart, then they just turn that brown banana into delicious banana bread…but you can’t do that with this little guy!

So just do everyone a favor and dress them up in this Toddler Banana Costume: Made of 100% Polyester, this yellow banana tunic will fit his yellow oblong shape perfectly, and it will keep him toasty until you guys can figure out your stuff and move to the tropics. Maybe even get yourself a gorilla costume, dress up like Carmen Miranda, or go as a jar of peanut butter to make your little buddy feel more comfortable about themselves and to, you know, save yourself from so many questions. And cut down on those bananas, lady! Try having just one a day from now on. Maybe 2, if you're feelin' crazy.