Contents

Episode Information

Season 14

Episode 1

Original Air date: March 17, 2010

Plot

Tiger Woods PGA Tour's new game.

The episode begins at Windermere, Florida in the early hours of Thanksgiving morning 2009 inside the home of golfing legend: Tiger Woods. He and his wife appear to be having a violent argument in which Mrs. Woods is attempting to his Tiger with one of his golfing clubs because of his extramarital affairs. He escapes the house, climbs into his car and drives off, which is when the shot pans out and Cartman and Kenny are seen playing out the argument on the new edition of the EA Sports Tiger Woods PGA Tour. Stan and Kyle soon join the boys.

The board of experts.

The scene cuts to a conference room with "the best minds our country has to offer" in which the question is asked: 'Why are rich successful men suddenly going out and trying to have sex with lots of woman?'. The conclusion comes to the answer of an outbreak of "sex addiction": a new condition which makes people (men in particular) think about sex all the time and dream about having more than one sexual partner. Health screenings are demanded in all of the nations schools to find out if any young people are carrying the disease.

A suggestive picture and a set of questions are asked to the fourth-grade class to determine if they have sex addiction. Butters and Kenny become unsettled amongst the group and after not being able to answer what colour the handkerchief was in the ladies hand, Kyle and the other two boys are told they have the addiction.

The boys being given details of their illness.

The scientist who tested the children for the condition takes the three boys into a side room and tells them of their not-too-distant fate. This leads to a discussion about auto erotic asphyxiation, and in a later scene, Kenny is found in his room by his mother having died of the act while dressed as Batman.

During Kenny's funeral, Butters has an outburst about the bush in the cemetery likening it to that of the "bush" in the picture shown to him and the other students in the classroom. Kyle has to pull him away from the bush and the pair have a small brawl as Butters tries to get back to the bush.

Next, the episode follows Cartman and Stan playing the PGA Tour game again, this time depicting Woods and Elin fighting on a golf course, whilst sharing tips with each other on how to receive special combos such as the 'pre-nup power-up'.

Bill Clinton, David Letterman, Charlie Sheen, David Duchovny and Ben Roethlisberger are all portrayed as belonging to the Karne Institute for Sex Addiction, the place where Butters and Kyle have to go to attend classes to overcome their addiction. The class is about how to not "get caught". When Kyle says that this is wrong and that they should be become clean instead of learning how to keep from getting caught, the teacher takes out his cellphone and says "we have a turd in the punchbowl".

Meanwhile, scientists are trying to find a reason for the addiction and after an experiment on a group of monkeys, they realise it must be because of money as only rich and famous people have these sexual tendencies. The president of the United States of America, Barrak Obama is given the news that money has a direct affect on the virus' ability to develop; and the reason for which is the 100 dollar bill's Independance Hall's picture. He tells the two men that in 1947 in Roswell, New Mexico, two deceased alien bodies were recovered from a flying saucer, aliens carrying a disease, the sex addiction one that is now spreading all across America.

The board of experts

Butters, Kyle, Charlie, Ben and the rest of the addiction group are next seen flying in a helicopter, where they boys are told they will have to kill an alien which is spreading the virus. Obama uncovers that the alien must also be a wizard because of a "spell of invisibility" it may have cast - "which explains everything!". After this, one of the armed guards carrying out the mission pipes up and says "C'mon, we all know what's going on here, don't we? Whenever a story breaks about a rich famous guy going around an having sex with tons of girls, we all wanna act like we don't understand it, but we do - we're guys you know! Our brains are wired to become the alpha male and get all the woman we can...". Obama then speaks into his watch: "we have a turd in the punch bowl". The other men of the SWAT team take the man away.

Butters and Kyle are given guns to kill the wizard alien with, and soon after, the man from the SWAT team that was taken away earlier walks in, dressed as the wizard alien. The boys shoot the alien several times before he dies and this is celebrated by the other men in their group and their country by the song "Sexual Healing".