tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post8331661243953978261..comments2018-02-17T15:42:09.043-08:00Comments on The Forum - Disciplined Husbands &amp; Disciplinary Wives: The Forum - Vol. 209 - Soften But Not WeakenDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-83746857881533264882017-06-08T18:01:20.138-07:002017-06-08T18:01:20.138-07:00@Dan:
There is always the possibility of &quot;fun...@Dan:<br />There is always the possibility of &quot;funishment&quot; spankings (spanking for the fun of it) with Shilo for me if I really wanted it and he agreed, but I lost much of my strength, so it&#39;s not very probable at this point.<br /><br />@ Anna:<br />I do miss it, but I understand that it&#39;s something that is possible in nearly every relationship. I was hit really hard when my recovery wasn&#39;t swift or easy, and I realized how blessed I am to have both Stitch and Shilo in my life. I have room in my heart for someone else who desires discipline, but I just have to wait patiently Merry Contraryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13605968415958113942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-83999502043048492702017-06-08T09:03:29.819-07:002017-06-08T09:03:29.819-07:00Dan
I think both men and women who have come to re...Dan<br />I think both men and women who have come to rely on discipline as an important tool in their communications would miss it greatly.<br />annnaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-58365503107178713912017-06-07T17:50:10.371-07:002017-06-07T17:50:10.371-07:00Agreed on all these points.Agreed on all these points.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-50722969894895898272017-06-07T17:48:31.723-07:002017-06-07T17:48:31.723-07:00I hadn&#39;t really thought of things from that an...I hadn&#39;t really thought of things from that angle. We have talked about whether men would miss the spanking if they suddenly became perfect angels and didn&#39;t need to be punished anymore. But, what about the disciplinary wife who has come to enjoy being in that role?Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-50463108006743613582017-06-06T23:46:13.552-07:002017-06-06T23:46:13.552-07:00My nearly 11 months of recovering from my accident...My nearly 11 months of recovering from my accident and the resultant complications has had an effect on how I handle my Household. I had to delegate responsibilities and I became dependent on both Shilo and Stitch to take care of the simplest tasks. I believe I mentioned before that I am unable to provide physical discipline unless they are willing to receive it, but I also mentioned that neither of them really do anything worthy of discipline anymore. Before the accident, I had effectively disciplined them to the point of obedience, so I would occasionally give maintenance spankings.<br /><br />Being injured and dependent on them for everything not only meant I could no longer spank either one of them, but it also delivered a huge blow to my self-esteem. I&#39;m happy to say that my self-esteem has somewhat improved, but I was unable to regain compliance on my occasional maintenance spankings. (Not that they need it)<br /><br />My next step is to find someone who desires discipline and is willing to accept it from me. (AH! the beauty of polyamory!) For now, though, I plan on resting on my laurels.Merry Contraryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13605968415958113942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-25640425799373006422017-06-06T20:38:36.384-07:002017-06-06T20:38:36.384-07:00I agree with all three comments above and the mess...I agree with all three comments above and the message from anonymous. I will add that if there is a disagreement and a punishment results, after the spanking, it is over and done. Never to be brought up again. Slate is clean again and we move on.Spanked Cowboyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03598628621654103370noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-974474018121512922017-06-06T11:43:14.174-07:002017-06-06T11:43:14.174-07:00Dan
Different opinions and even an argument are fi...Dan<br />Different opinions and even an argument are fine, as long as Peter realizes when I say enough <br />if he continues, our next move is to punishment.<br />annaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-9918873015683147702017-06-05T11:30:38.656-07:002017-06-05T11:30:38.656-07:00I don&#39;t know if they offer a methodology to re...I don&#39;t know if they offer a methodology to resolve arguments as different opinions are healthy in a relationship. However they do make sure the disagreement is conducted in a respectful manner.The Glenmorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10011257092494429520noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-58460591625221137382017-06-05T11:01:45.157-07:002017-06-05T11:01:45.157-07:00This is a topic that is probably worth exploring m...This is a topic that is probably worth exploring more, perhaps next week.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-87349112411712332022017-06-05T11:01:11.516-07:002017-06-05T11:01:11.516-07:00I can&#39;t say we have gotten to a point where DD...I can&#39;t say we have gotten to a point where DD or FLR prevents disagreements or arguments, though I do think they provide a methodology by which to resolve them.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-76720689277809122252017-06-05T08:30:42.912-07:002017-06-05T08:30:42.912-07:00My wife and I are very much at the start of our FL...My wife and I are very much at the start of our FLR although we have been married for over 20 years. Recently she commented that we haven&#39;t argued in ages. My reply was &#39;of course we haven&#39;t Madam. When I asked and you agreed to take control in our relationship how could there be any arguments or indeed disagreements from that point? you became the decision maker from that moment in time and whilst it may be nice for you to ask my opinion in certain matters I understand that your decision is final.&#39;<br />Being able to have that attitude does not make me any weaker a person in any other part of my life. I can assure you that I can be just as stubborn at work as I have always been. In fact, I&#39;m finding that following in our FLR has given me even more strength and more focus at home.<br />MAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-58415491407471272782017-06-05T07:59:54.224-07:002017-06-05T07:59:54.224-07:00In total agreement with Strap51. I submit complet...In total agreement with Strap51. I submit completely to my Dominant Partner in our FLR. She makes every decision. She welcomes my input, weighs it but the final decision is hers. I never feel weak in my role and I believe she, a a strong dominant, appreciates a strong submissive who does provide love, support, service and obedience. Sorry for using your exact words, Strap51, but as Dan has said, they are just perfect.Spanked Cowboyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03598628621654103370noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-57464152394972757062017-06-05T07:18:27.065-07:002017-06-05T07:18:27.065-07:00Well said!Well said!Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-62648857887402434522017-06-04T22:36:41.592-07:002017-06-04T22:36:41.592-07:00Dan,
I don&#39;t think you need to worry about be...Dan,<br /><br />I don&#39;t think you need to worry about being weakened at home or being less effective as a leader at work, because you are submissive to your wife&#39;s authority. Men who willingly accept a FLR are usually strong and confident in themselves; that is precisely what allows them to offer the gift of submission. I believe that a woman values a strong submissive, and one who can offer her love, support, and service, as well as obedience. Would she have any use for a weak man in such a relationship? In return, the woman offers her love, dominance and domestic guidance as an equally valuable gift - one that would be wasted on a man too weak to fully appreciate it. So, as you said above, the couples are equal...but just in a different way. Strap51https://www.blogger.com/profile/03154759350290193434noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-64121072804249906442017-06-04T16:36:41.340-07:002017-06-04T16:36:41.340-07:00Your last sentence generally resonates with me. M...Your last sentence generally resonates with me. My wife does tend to seek a lot of ratification where her decisions are concerned and, therefore, in order to help increase her comfort with leading there are times I flat-out refuse to give an opinion or make a decision, thereby forcing her to do it herself.<br /><br />Most of the couples we hang out with tend to be pretty equal, at least in terms of their visible power dynamic. I can think of one exception and, interestingly, it is a couple in which she clearly wears the pants. But, in that particular case, the husband seems to be kind of co-dependent on *everyone*. Just not a strong personality and incredibly indecisive. Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-66807216114177149212017-06-04T13:05:42.909-07:002017-06-04T13:05:42.909-07:00To answer the main question as I understand it, I ...To answer the main question as I understand it, I would have to say, like always...anything is possible in any situation. The most co-dependent couple I know is also the most traditionally vanilla people you could ever meet in 2017. Conversely, Rosa and I always joke among friends that while we choose to be with each other, and while each of us contributes significantly to the relationship, neither Rosa nor I would have ANY trouble surviving or even thriving on our own. I am frankly mildly repulsed by people who can&#39;t exist on their own.......but that&#39;s just the libertarian in me grumbling.<br /><br />My biggest struggle is giving in, not seeking more input on what to do next. Which is not to say that as a human being in a relationship I don&#39;t seek her opinion on things. kdpierrehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04623475693010155892noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-47639486631466845742017-06-03T14:15:19.004-07:002017-06-03T14:15:19.004-07:00Rcb, that&#39;s pretty close to how I describe wha...Rcb, that&#39;s pretty close to how I describe what DD does for us, though I look at it is both working on weaknesses and balancing strengths that may be a little too strong. Though, any strength can be a liability when taken to an extreme, so it still is basically what you said.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-13543269351454296352017-06-03T14:06:46.752-07:002017-06-03T14:06:46.752-07:00Hi Anna. True, though the two can--and maybe even ...Hi Anna. True, though the two can--and maybe even should--overlap. As I recall, you have spanked Peter for some bad work behavior. There have been instances where my wife certainly should have. I do think sometimes that I really should have a lot more respect for the chain-of-command, given that I really do like it in theory. But, if I was actually in the military I have little doubt I would have spent most of my time cleaning latrines or being put in the brig for insubordination.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-51972168121931875582017-06-03T13:13:29.709-07:002017-06-03T13:13:29.709-07:00I feel like for us, we are working on our weakness...I feel like for us, we are working on our weaknesses. I am learning to be more attentive and she is learning to be more assertive. There are other things going on too, like what kinds of things in our marriage warrent this kind of (dd) attention vs just discussions. It&#39;s been a great combination of healing and growth for us. RcbAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-83122761984176697212017-06-03T11:05:50.794-07:002017-06-03T11:05:50.794-07:00Dan
I think you answered your own question. I thin...Dan<br />I think you answered your own question. I think you are becoming more and more aware that perhaps the submission at home is just that .. submission at home and at home alone. In my mind you are more of a mature man when you realize that.<br />annaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com