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TRIBEWORK is about consuming the process of life, the journey, together.

Monday, November 5, 2012

Healing Experiences of Emotional Trauma

“We don’t heal in isolation, but in
community.”

— S. Kelley Harrell

With certain obvious exceptions,
this article is pointed at the everyday experiences of family trauma and how we
heal them. Sexual and physical abuse is beyond the scope of this article. What
is directly in view is the power struggle known to emotional abuse—which, in my
view, can be traumatic to the point of producing conniptions where normally
steady souls can become mentally compromised for a time.

Family, despite what we might
believe, is often a great source of emotional trauma. When we have suffered how
are we to heal what we have suffered?

The Destructiveness of Isolation

The opposite of empowerment, so
far as family trauma is concerned, is isolation. The more we try to isolate or
deny the issues, the more problematic they become.

Take an industrial pipeline, for
instance. When pressure in pipelines builds beyond the design of the pipe-work,
there needs to be a relief valve to allow the excess pressure to be relieved to
protect the whole pipeline from bursting open. Likewise, anybody who insists on
remaining in their isolation is condemning themselves to a potential implosion
of soul; it’s a cesspool devoid of logic. The pressure will build and build,
and anger threatens to spew over the edges into violence.

In so many ways the devil is
engaged in pushing people further into their isolation. This enemy of God knows
the destructive power of silence, where purging the pressure is truly the only
way to go when it comes to emotional trauma.

The Problem Shared Is a Problem Halved

Issues propagating emotional
trauma in the family system can be healed when we share them with trusted loved
ones who have the emotional capacity to hold what we share, without getting
angry.

The importance of having somebody
who listens to us seems obvious. All we need do is reach out.

Because we find ourselves in
situations where family sometimes hurts us, we need family or friends who can
listen without judging too much. And as we share, we are encouraged to be
ourselves, without denigrating or condemning ourselves. The trusted person who
can listen wants us healed, and they will do whatever they can to support this.

***

Family, of all people, has the
ability to hurt family. When we have been hurt or betrayed it is vital that we
seek healing; that we resist isolating ourselves, and find a trusted loved one
or friend who will listen to us. Our healing is founded in our sharing.