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Friday, September 24, 2004

The Deer

(I got me those APOLITICAL BLUES... hawww... hawwww)

Sammy Hagar’s terrible attempt at blues, which is probably the only blemish on OU812, other than the name of course

So I get home from work the other night at 12:30am. I reversed into my driveway and through the rear view, there’s this deer that’s just staring at me. I figure that I’ll probably startle the hell outta the doe once I open the door and show her my ferocious man chest.

I get out and she’s still staring at me like,
“What the f*ck are you looking at?”
I walked to the edge of the pine tree and there were 3 more of them. They didn’t freak out or jump to the next yard. They just would look at me and continue eating the acorns.

Whatever, I went to bed.

Next day at 12:30PM, I get out of my car from the grocery store and there they were again, in bright ass daylight! I have never seen deer at that time of day and tame ones at that.

Like the night before, these deer didn’t give a f*ck about anyone or anything.

I think it’s just another knee slapper to God.

See I have my fantasy football team ‘The Deer’. I figured since everyone will have weird ass trippy names, I’d go with something normal and strange the more ya think about it. Why deer? Why not, they’re known for running away really fast! Then there’s that home video of some dude getting mauled by a bigass buck.

My team hasn’t done too bad this year for being 0-2. I have lost both games by a combined total of 7 points! That’s BS man. This last week I only lost by TWO points because the Vikings were deathly afraid of their running game in the second half.

So why have I been seeing all these deer lately? Because God wants to rub it in my face that I keep losing by a little bit.

He wants me to rant on it! He wants me to get all red-in-the-face and flustered and throw down the notebook. Well, I won’t and I’ll win someday.

Last week I went 9-7 to even out my overall record.

Don’t mean to ‘toot my own horn’, but I’ve been damn close on some of my scores. Not that the scores matter but still….

New Orleans @ St. LouisWithout a good running game, Saints will be in trouble. This game as usually been a classic rivalry, but not this game. Rams suck and so do the Saints without the running game. Still, the Saints will win on the road
Saints 30 Rams 24

Pittsburgh @ MiamiMiami SUCKS so bad!
Steelers 34 Dolphins 6

Cleveland @ NYGiantsCleveland has so many injured players. I guess Lee Suggs will finally play a couple downs, but who cares. I’m surprised this stupid game isn’t on TV.
Giants 27 Browns 13

Arizona @ Atlanta
This is a game where Mike Vick should blow up, but he wont. I wouldn’t be surprised if the Cards give the Falcons a run. Falcons will be too much though. Denny Green will have a big breakfast
Falcons 34 Cards 24

Baltimore @ CincinnatiThis game seems eerily similar to that awful Dolphins/Bengals game last Sunday night. Deion’s hurt, but why is that news? This game sounds so ugly, it makes me want to cry. It's the inspiration to a blues song.
Ravens 16 Bengals 10

Philadelphia @ DetroitThis actually sounds like an interesting game. Let’s see if Roy Williams can do anything against that secondary. Lets see if the Joey Harrington will have any time to throw the damn ball
Eagles 17 Lions 10

Jacksonville @ Tennessee
Jacksonville has a nasty defense, especially against the run. If they had an offense they’d be unstoppable, but they don’t.
Titans 14 Jags 3

Houston @ Kansas CityKansas City couldn’t stop geese from crossing the road. This has shootout written all over it.
Chiefs 41 Texans 30

Green Bay @ IndianapolisHere’s a quality game that will actually be televised. Brett Favre never plays well in domes and the Packers suck anyway. This will be that breakout game the Colts offense has been waiting for.
Colts 38 Packers 17

San Francisco @ Seattle
I don’t know. I don’t give a damn about any of these teams.
49ers 21 Seahawks 17