On “Perfection” During the Holidays

December 8, 2017|

Oh how I love when we meet here on Fridays! I hope that you guys had a great week and are looking forward to the weekend as much as I am. Today’s post is one of my absolute favorites from the entire year and I cannot think of a better way to end the week. I alluded to this in yesterday’s Holiday Home Tour Post, but lately I feel like the need for perfection is just overwhelming and hitting us moms from every single angle. Susie’s immaculate highlight reel on Facebook, Mary’s perfectly styled Instagram feed, the constant need to be doing more, buying more and basically selling your soul for the idea of achieving perfection in Motherhood. I find that the need for perfection hits especially hard during the Holidays and that’s just unfair. Have you taken your kids on a sleigh ride? Did they write a hand inked note to Santa? Surely you got tickets for the Polar Express, right? What about your Christmas cards? I just know you plan to spend 1,284,383 hours of free time addressing those just perfectly (not to mention you HAVE to share the perfect family photo where everyone is really smiling but in reality shit was hitting the fan). Is your alarm set to move the Elf on the Shelf?? Don’t forget today is the day he’s pooping chocolate chips! Also remember to buy ALL of the perfect Christmas gifts, matching pajamas, hottest toys, and remember to look dang happy while you’re doing it….because hashtag ChristmasCheer!

It’s all too much. Too much for me, at least. These past few years of my life I’ve learned to understand and recognize my personal limits…the points where I lose the joy. I’m especially sensitive to these limits during the Holidays because I don’t want to miss out on one ounce of the magic through the eyes of my children.

p.s. I hope that you’ll indulge me in a post full of photos today because these are some of my absolute favorites. My mama heart could quiet literally burst.

Dan and I both have busy seasons of work leading up to the Holidays, so I have to be diligent and careful as to how I allot my free time. You won’t find me sending out Christmas cards (my friends still give me grief about this), but my goodness it’s a real time drain and (unless I know you’re framing it and placing it on your mantle to enjoy all year long), the thought of them ending up in the trash can after all of my hard work makes me a little ill.

You also won’t find any elves on any of our shelves. I’m sure one day I’ll get some very direct questions from a very inquisitive 4 year old, but today’s not that day, and until then I’ll direct my time and energy elsewhere. Let’s be real clear, most days I can’t even remember to get myself off of the shelf, much less some Elf.

Our calendar isn’t booked solid. We have a few Holiday things planned but I’m not filling it up, because the thought of orchestrating getting to and from that many activities and parties gives me #alltheanxiety.

Instead of the hustle and bustle, I’ve been planning cozy afternoons at home with the girls. I love having them all to myself without any real distractions so that I can soak them up and share in their magic spirits.

This year, instead of trying to perfect a sugar cookie recipe with immaculately piped royal icing for decorating, I opted for some slice and bake store bought sugar cookies and DIY decorations. And you know what? Landry LOVED it anyway. We blasted Christmas carols and made cookies for Daddy and the neighbors and there way no stress. She put about 3 tablespoons of frosting on each one with glitter galore and candy placed in ways that didn’t create a perfect pattern…and crazy enough…it was all ok.

Of course, this little nugget has also slowed us down in the best way possible. Babies have a way of doing that to you and it’s both refreshing and welcomed just when you need it most. Planning afternoons together means that we can also enjoy sweet Lawson girl and she’s loving the attention. We will cozy up into pjs after picking Landry up from school and I’ll set up the twinkle lights on our bed to read a Christmas story before naps. Lawson tries to eat the lights and has successfully ripped 9 out of 10 of our Christmas books, but thankfully Landry laughs it off and gently tells her “no no Lawson girl.”

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Speaking of Lawson, I ordered her these little Ugg booties because I was at my wits end with socks and she won’t wear traditional “shoes.” Thankfully, she LOVES these and they actually stay on her little feet. They are great to wear around the house and also cute enough to wear out and about….especially perfect for dropping off and picking up big sister from school!

Cute as a gender neutral gift (very reasonable price for a designer name), but truly functional for your own baby, too! Out of 350 reviews, there’s only one negative! That says a LOT for a baby shoe! They come in 3 great colors, HERE.

All of this to say that if you are feeling stressed for perfection or feel the joy of the season slipping away even the slightest bit, take a minute to reset and refocus. Cancel a few activities and free up some time on your calendar to do nothing…that “nothing” always turns in to the best kind of “something.” And that “something” isn’t always Instagram worthy, but it’s worthy of a place in your mama heart that you won’t soon forget.

Your kids won’t remember the things that they “didn’t” do during the Holidays…but they will remember what you DID do with heart. They remember the moments that you were fully present and shared wholeheartedly in the magic with them.

Cheers to you, mama—you’re doing a great job.

And, besides, perfection seems boring anyway.

One of our favorite Christmas books is the Polar Express, what’s yours?

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If you are looking for easy matching PJ sets for your kids (boys, girls, toddlers and babies), THESE SETS are perfection. They were comfy for the girls and I love that they came in classic styles that covered all age ranges. I actually ordered them online and picked them up in my local store within an hour, which has become my go-to shopping method!

Since we are spending lots more time at home this season, I took the liberty of upgrading my house shoes to these UGG bootie slippers. They are insanely comfy and lined with UGG’s signature wool that feels like shearling. It’s so so soft and warm, but not itchy at all. The rubber sole is also a must for mamas because I wear them outside playing in the driveway with the girls and also feel much more confident walking around on our wood floors while holding Lawson when I have a rubber sole on.

I couldn’t get over how stinkin’ cute the UGG slippers and house shoes are these days! Definitely something that I would be THRILLED to have under my tree, but also happy that I treated myself to these ahead of time in case Santa didn’t get the memo 😉

If you are still on the hunt for a gift, definitely consider a pair of UGGs. I think that these slippersmade the most darling gifts for moms, mother in laws, or the gal who has everything.

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Not to leave out the big kids, they have some pretty adorable options for them as well. Landry promptly added THESE to her list when she saw them.

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I love this photo with all of my heart and soul. Originally, I told Ashley to try and crop out the mess. The imperfections of my planters with dying mums in December, the water stains on the left side of the door because that damn gutter cant be fixed, the peeling paint, the horrendous excuse for flower beds down by the stairs and the garland that had fallen from it’s place on the door just minutes before we sat down to take this photo. But I decided to publish this photo any way and not crop out the mess…oddly enough I want to remember it. And I want to remember what it was like to hold my babies through it all and choose them over and over rather than killing myself trying to be perfect.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

If you need us, we will be snuggled up and watching Elf over and over again! A heartfelt Merry Christmas to you and yours…

Comments

This hit home… thanks for putting it down on paper … or… the internet. Haha. I try to do a Christmas card every other year (it’s my off year… yaaaas) and no elf on the shelf here either. I love our downtime at home and so does my little fam.

This post literally brought tears to my eyes and is such a good reminder. I too find myself worrying about doing all the things this time of year and being together is really what it is all about. I have added some slice and bake cookies to my grocery list today and cannot wait to decorate with my little people! Thank you for this and thank you for being real!

Merry Christmas and Amen! You’re doing it right mama! Oh, and btw when I first saw that last pic of you and the girls, I noticed nothing but your smiling faces! Not a single imperfection there. 🙂 Thanks for sharing what so many of us feel at one point or another!

You know what’s funny? I didn’t notice a single one of those things you mentioned about the last photo until I read them and specifically looked for them. Makes me pause and think that the million “imperfections” that I see are probably things no one else even notices!

Love this!! I don’t have kids yet, but this is such a good reminder anyway (and an even better one once I do!). I love that this makes it real because perfection is so hard to attain.

And on a different note if for some reason you do decide to do Christmas cards, I can’t recommend Minted enough! They do free recipient addressing (you just need to upload a list or you can manually type them in), which makes things so much easier. They also added a service this year where you can text them your cover photo and within 24-48 hours they text you back 4-5 recommended options, so it really saves time. I’ve just had a really great experience using them for the past 3 years (I found them when looking for wedding invitations and my aunt has used them for years), so I figured that would be helpful to know!

Love this post!! My husband and I just decided tonight that our normal Christmas Eve with family is going to be Christmas Eve with OUR family and honestly I am looking forward to a quiet night just the 3 of us!!

Perfect post! I have really been feeling the urge lately to simplify my life….and it all relates to the iPhone. It’s just too much!!! I’m gonna start leaving the phone at home more often and live in the present and not in the virtual world!!! I’m glad I’m not the only one feeling the need to get back to the basics. It’s my New Years resolution!

The last pic of you and the girls on the porch–so cute!!…I know you may have perfectionist leanings, but I didn’t notice any of the “imperfections”. I just saw two girls so happy to be with their beautiful mama. So glad you’ve decided to take the pressure off of yourself. Merry, merry!

Love it…I stopped doing Christmas cards years ago for those exact reasons! And we don’t do Elf on the Shelf either…not that I’ve come up with a good explanation why for my two boys who ask every year! Kids don’t want to feel that stress from their parents….and perfection IS boring! Do you and don’t feel bad about it. My boys are 9 and 5 and I’ve finally figured that out!

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