Wednesday

Appropriate or Not.... That is the question.

I recently moved into a less expensive apartment and no longer have a washer/dryer hookup. Would it be appropriate to ask my nanny family if I could do my laundry at their home? The children nap at least once a day, often twice. I have no chores which leaves a lot of down time during nap time. I don't have a lot of time outside of my busy nanny schedule (Mon-Fri 7-6) and it's very expensive to use the laundry mat.

14 comments:

I believe it may be appropriate under some circumstances - for example if you have a GREAT relationship to them they may be open. Also - if you are not planning on overdoing it and abusing the privilegde. It appears by your post that you are honest and responsible - it cannot hurt to ask! Make it lighthearted - offer them some homeade cookies or etc

OP here. Thanks for the replies. I'm still not sure if I find it innapropriate or not. I feel strongly they'll say yes. They are nice and have issues saying no. I definitely don't want to take advantage of that.

My last position was live-in, so of course I did my laundry there. I've never asked in other live-out positions but it was offered.

Do you think it's okay to slip the W/D situation into conversation and see if they offer? I don't want to out right ask and take advantage, but it's possible they'd be happy to let me wash my stuff at their house.

I really don't think it's appropriate, but you do you. It's not about whether they would say yes or no; it's more about whether it's something you should ask of them. To me it seems extremely inappropriate to ask.

Bring it up in alight hearted way - say like " listen - just say no! if this is not ok but - could i wash a few things while the kids nap? just say no if it's not ok!" - you know your peeps - if they love you and the kids love you they will probably be happy to help you! But - if they are stand-offish and strict then no, not.

I have had people I work for let me use the washer when my washer was not working - just for basic items, not everything

It's not something that would bother me! I've had a nanny for 4 years now and I would not care - it's hard to be at someone else's home all day and to be unable to do the things you need to do too. I never mind if my nanny runs personal errands or has to do personal tasks. As long as the kids do fun things most of the time and all responsibilities are taken care of it doens't bother me.

I also live in a small place without a w/d and I do my laundry at my nf's house. It started way back when I was first hired and worked 16-18 hour days due to some crazy circumstances at the beginning (it was was a short term emergency situation that resolved within 8-10 weeks but did an amazing job of forming a lot of trust between my employers and I right off the bat). I would come in way before the laundromat opened and still be at work long after it closed, and mb must have realized I had no way of doing laundry when I got desperate and started wearing anything that was clean. She told me I was always welcome to use their w/d and that she felt good about being able to offer me this "perk".

I keep it to a minimum - two loads, once a week - and (although this isn't something she requested, expects, etc) I process whatever laundry is in the house whenever I'm here. It takes me two minutes to throw laundry into the washer in the morning, two to switch it to the dryer at lunch, and maybe fifteen minutes to fold everything while the kids nap and I catch up on Doctor Who via Netflix (another perk I've been invited to make use of). Mostly the kid's laundry, but I'll do mb and db's stuff, too, if they bring it down. Again, although this is NOT part of my job description and I've NEVER been asked to do laundry in the two years I've been here, it definitely gets noticed and appreciated.

I think mentioning it in passing is a great idea... saying something like "Ugh, I have to go to the laundromat, haha I miss having a washer and dryer!"

No, it's not appropriate. It's their electricity and water bill that you'd be adding to. If it were a one-time thing, like if your washer broke and you HAD to do laundry that very day, I MIGHT ask the family but only if I had a really, really good relationship with them. Otherwise, I don't think it's appropriate at all, to be honest. It's like food - I typically do not eat at people's houses unless they have expressly said "help yourself to anything", and even at that, I don't overdo it. I have had one or two families who liked to feed me, which I never turned down, but never assumed it otherwise, and would bring my own food. Regardless of how much they pay you, those types of things are still their resources. Your clients are not friends or family, though it may feel that way sometimes, and I would never ask them for a favor unless I had exhausted all other resources.

Don't ask for things, that's just rude and putting them on the spot! Personally, I might mention in passing what a pain it is having to go to the laundromat at the weekends and if they out of the kindness of their heart offer for you to use their washer dryer, then say yes. But for the love of God, don't ask.

I've only been ever asked that of my NF once. It was after I'd been working for them for 2 years and the laundry facility was down at my apartment complex. I offered to pay something for the water I used. It's not something I would ask on a regular basis though.

I agree with OT on this one. My rule for these situations is usually "Is this my problem or my nanny families problem? Is my life outside of work intruding into my work life?" It sounds like you have a personal issue that isn't going away soon. You chose this apartment and maybe should have considered your limited free time (due to your job yes) before moving in. Some situations you can't help when home hunting but this is your career. As nannies we always have to look at the bigger picture. I run to the bank and occasionally pick up some groceries with my charges but a regular task like this, in my opinion, is too much.

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