Join me as I half-ass my way through medical school, encountering all sorts of freaks (patients, classmates, myself, etc.) along the way

Friday, October 07, 2005

I'm Every Woman

The scene: Labor and Delivery Night Call. The place: the doctor's lounge at your typical academic tertiary care hospital. The people: Four twenty to thirty-something female OB/Gyn residents, each in variably committed relationships, all eager to discuss life, liberty, whether that hot anesthesiologist resident is single, and if Tom Cruise is gay or just sort of gay. Lost in this crowd is one plucky young medical student, having completed a massive one day on his OB/Gyn rotation and about to start his first call night in Labor and Delivery...

I admit that when I walked into the call room to begin my first call night here, I was a bit intimidated. Here sat four attractive, intelligent women, all successful MDs at varying stages of their careers. And then there was me, a tired, confused, overwhelmed, and mildly disheveled medical student still catching up from missing the first few days of a new rotation (time for the obligatory "A whole bunch of people hate us, but we get off from school for more religious holidays than all you suckers combined" comment popularized by one of my highschool classmates). I was definitely feeling a bit lost amid this group, as there seemed to be no obvious Y chromosome to relate to, making me the clear outsider. Would they reject me? Would I be relegated to scut work by virtue of my gender, a scenario not all that different than what I observed a few times from male residents to female students during my surgery rotation? Would any of these women go out with me?

Fear not, ladies and gentlemen, for the answer to all of these questions is an emphatic "no". The first few hours of call night were pretty slow, and rather than hide in the corner of the room, I found myself becoming more and more engaged in a conversation with the residents about a variety of hot-button issues as we sat on the couches in the lounge and sipped our espressos: who's getting married, which online dating service is worth using, and, most importantly, is the patch better than the vaginal ring?

Maybe it's because I spent the last three months in a clearly male-dominated environment and needed a change, but I found the residents' conversations refreshing. Before I knew it, I was totally getting into this conversation. Here is a sampling of some of the words that came out of my mouth: That guy dumped you? He's a fool! She slept with both of them? Dirty ho! That's the best excuse he could come up with? Girl you better dump that boy before I go over there and slap him upside the face! Let's watch Access Hollywood. Isn't Noah Wylie just so dreamy? Why aren't there any doctors like him around here? Don't mess with that nurse, she's on her period! What's the next book for Oprah's book club?

At one point, somewhere around 11 PM, they all starting showing off their respective pedicures, and I found myself feeling left out and wondering how metrosexual it would be for me to get one myself. Then they all started braiding each other's hair. I shit you not. Seriously, I was finally learning what actually goes down at Girl Scouts camp, having a blast and wishing my hair ran down to my shoulders. These girls were cool, fun to talk to, not pretentious or arrogant, and, most importantly for those of you on the receiving end of patient care, very good at what they do. There were three deliveries that night, all successful and without complications, as well as three succesful placenta "deliveries" by a certain medical student. (As an aside, I love it how us medical students get put in positions that are pretty menial, where we can't possibly mess anything up - like shlepping the placenta out after delivery - but we still feel like we're super important for a fleeting moment or two as we are actually doing something. Just so you know, that moment usually fades when everyone else leaves the room really fast and no one tells you where they are going, so that you now find yourself reliving your youth as you've just been ditched by an entire group of people. Not that that has ever happened to me before or anything.) In all, it was a great night. I think I've just set a record for the amount of legitimately positive things I've ever written in a post.

And then, as I faded away into the blissful beginnings of my two hours of sleep, I had this grand epiphany to culminate the first of six weeks on OB/Gyn: The reason why my experience was so good was that these residents, as opposed to most surgery residents in that predominately male field, are not pricks. And the reason why they are not pricks is because...well...they don't have any. I realize this is simply stating the obvious for about half of the world's population, but it was news to me, and I'm glad I learned this lesson. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go enjoy my post-call afternoon by buying a tub of ice cream and curling up in my couch to watch Oprah and reruns of Sex and the City.

84 Comments:

okay...but did your conversations with the men disintegrate in to blather too?I mean I totally understand for the need for female blather (when you've been surrounded by all men) but seriously...braiding and Access Hollywood?

Let me quote you: "I shit you not" why does every physician say that phrase? I have met tons of doctors. I am even married to one. And they ALL say that phrase "I shit you not". He said it yesterday when talking about some brain surgery that plucked a tumor from deep inside a venous cavern and left no deficits in the patient. "I shit you not, the patient woke up intact with zero neurological deficits!" It's like combining Shakespeare with street rap. I mean, all those years of extensive education. Hundreds of thousands of dollars spent to enrich your minds and they still use "I shit you not" Now that is something I should do a study on. I feel a thesis coming on....

You crack me up!! I love your site! Don't worry, you'll get a girl soon, esp. w/your new "understanding" of the female persuasion, (not to mention your great sense of humor and the fact that you're a doctor ;) ).Tina

Well Fake Doctor, I think you've finally figured out that Chevy Chase holds the secret to getting chicks: Be the ball. Go get that manicure and some Axe body spray. Your wife-to-be Natalie will be very pleased.

This has been insiteful for me. My former college roommate is also a medical student enduring many of the same things that you are at this time. It leads me to understand why she has so little time, being a student at one of the top medical schools, dealing with rotations, classes and exams. Good luck to you

Let me just offer a spin on your positive OB/GYN experience.....they are nice to you b/c you are a BOY. They treat us female med students who have the audacity to sit right in front of them and NOT go into OB/GYN like dirt. I shit you not.

*hands you a gold star* I thoroughly enjoy your blog. I accidentally bumped into it 2 days ago...and so far...they have been 2 days of captivating insight to the real world of med school. I was contemplating med school back in the day (who hasn't) so you've got my attention and I will keep tuning in to the show when i get the chance. Keep it up!

stopped on by because it was on some blogger list (my own blog sucks) and because i am a procrastinating med student with a monday exam. as a side note, i went to business school and i'm not sure if you'd want to go to their mixers. while the food and drinks will be good... the company will be like type A premeds on riddlin trying to be your best friend.

Having delivered a baby in the past year, it is comforting to hear that the staff is so in tune with each other! Your BLOG is awesome! :) I am starting my pre-req's for Nursing School in January. Mind adding me to your list of BLOGGERS? It would be nice to have someone to chat with who is more advanced in the same field. Thanks! :) Bailey PS:ANNE, THE PATCH IS MUCH BETTER.

I really like your thoughts.... and this is my second time visiting your site. I think I like! I am gonna put you on my favorites and visit often. I may want to put a link on my blog to yours..... come see me and tell me what you think.....

nice blog man....but I do have to give you one word of warning...those ladies in OB/GYN can flip on you at a moments notice...especially on the gynac side of things....you have been warned lol. Keep up the good work.

You are one of my new favorite reads. I linked to your blog after I spent time last week reading quite a bit of your recent and archived stuff.

I love the observation that these docs aren't "pricks because they don't have one."

Having attending births for the last fifteen years I can say that your attending a woman for the birth of the placenta isn't menial. The way a woman in labor and birth is attended impacts her heavily in breastfeeding, parenting and future births. I honor you for finding the rotation fun and the fellow residents refreshing.

I'm an old fart--44 and in nursing school now. I'm going to keep reading.

I must say that your blog is quite funny. It's refreshing when a guy begins to figure us women out, and with your newfound knowledge, I'd guess you'll have a girl to cozy up with for Sex in the City marathons in no time!

well... my english is not so good, but i undestood some words... (lol)u write to much, this is wonderful, me either. I am student of nusing and arts here in brasil. i will be back and i will add u on my links. take care, and don't forget to be urself and to prentend with the men who is a shit!

Nice to know you got on so well with them. Wonder if it has something to do with your gender? In my profession, I find that female doctors are brittle to the point of rudeness when I advocate for a patient's needs while the majority of male physicians can have a professional conversation with me. What's up with that?

This woman will never be changing bedpans, but the thought of doing dental work without anesthetic on a particular blog commentator sounds like a fabulous plan. On a side note, I hope you enjoy your next 6 weeks, bro. They should be quite educational.

Hi! Well I`m looking foward to spent a night like that, until now my shifts have been not boring but frustating...I'm their slave and the best part is my mate flirting with the doctor while I do all the job (I repeat the slave job!)

i don't know where you go to med school, but ob/gyn is absolutely malicious where i'm at. the residents talk shit about students, even to other students. it's one giant sorority, and not in a good way.surgery, on the other hand...cowboys. love'em.

...and you make me feel so unpopular. How do you have 39 people leaving comments for you over 2 days? What's your secret, other than the obvious fall-on-the-floor-hilarious experiences you have? I think I'll have to go to med school. That must be it.

Someone obviously missed the finer point of my comment. Women have been so historically set back on advancing themselves professionally that we often forget that we are all seeking to break through the same barriers and can occasionally let something as insignificant as a "glass ceiling" or a career title obscure our outlook. Men, whom I welcome in the field, are also in the career of nursing and are of tremendous vslue. People without proper respect for the profession do themselves and others a tremendous disservice.

My mother, who became a nurse back in the semi-dark ages (1958) says that she thinks treatment of patients has improved greatly with there being more female doctors. Particularly the treatment of female patients. And the younger male doctors have a more compassionate attitude than their predecessors due to working with female doctors. This may be a bit of a generalization but I think it mostly holds true.My mother can recall when the standard response to a woman suffering from horrendous menstrual cramps was "it's all in your head." Now it is recognized that there are prostoglandins and other fun things that I'm sure you know a good deal more about than I which contribute to this difficulty. I think you're going to make a great doctor. You're very observant about people. And don't worry--someday you'll find a nice lady doctor who will say yes when you ask her out!But what I really need to know is, do more female residents prefer Noah Wylie or Goran Vizjnic? Or do they still wish George Clooney would come back? And is ER even still on except in syndication?Good luck to ya!Cheesy 1

fine..... at last... found a medical blog.... we r at extreme corners of the world....but ure medical life is similar to mine.... as it it with every medical student...... it sucks..well sometime someone else does the sucking.....

hi there!im a student nurse in my final year and to b honest with you, i had a good time in the labour ward and all the docs were really nice to me...unfortunately i did meet some bitchy midwives! and yeah it feels great to deliver a placenta, however after a while, the novelty does ware off!

I am a person looking to heal her soul and spirit, put some joy back in my days, and give me hope of each day. My friend Wanda introduced me to "Mail Art" and "Artist Trading Cards". I am so amazed at the art she receives everyday, I love art, not real good at it but would love a creative way to express myself. Therefore, I'd like to start a Mail Call by snail mail only with the Theme being "Fairies" If anyone would like to share their talent and expertise, I would be very thankful. My contact information is: Carrie, 610 Third Avenue, Williamsport, PA 17701. No returns, all art exhibited on my blog and images of exhibition will be e-mailed if you include your e-mail address. Will gladly send art in return if requested! Thanks!. Please forward this email on to anyone who you think may be interested in participating...Carrie My Email: crconfer@verizon.netMy Homepage: http://www.geocities.com/crconferMy blog: http://crconfer.blogspot.com/

I agree with women physicians being caring and sensitive. Their care seeems to be obvious in physician-patient interaction, and I'm saying this as a guy. On the other issue, as a medical student, I have those moments of glory as I do even the most menial of tasks. It's the beginning of the path.

I see that I am not alone when I say, "I'm hooked!" I am still looking forward to med. school someday. Have I just not read enough of your blogs yet?I'll be staying tuned and catching up on reruns or rereads rather!

You're starting to resemble George on Grey's Anatomy. Are you sure you're not pulling a "single white female" thing on these hapless unsuspecting female residents? If not, let me say that I am duly impressed by any man that can, not only get in touch with his feminine side, but go public with it. Hoorah for you. Can you tell me...how many dates do you get with such newfound estrogen flowing through your veins?

Oh yeah...I really do enjoy your blog. And just like every other Tom, Dick and Jane who has posted here...I'm also in a med studies field. Ultrasound Tech. By the way...don't mind the sarcasm, that's just my inner single self who must persist in being a cynic!!!

This has got to be added to your classic post list. I, too, am going through your old posts, and I think as you get further along your blog, your writing's getting stronger. Maybe it's the late nights, and maybe it's the braiding experience, but I hope you continue writing, all the way through specialization (ob/gyn!). Those hot Jewish girls don't know what they're missing by not going out with you! :)

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