Derp government: State Department loses $6 billion

The latest news from the Washington Free Beaconwon’t look good on Hillary Clinton’s resume, which thus far consists mostly of bloody disasters, cover-ups, and loads of frequent flyer miles:

The State Department misplaced and lost some $6 billion due to the improper filing of contracts during the past six years, mainly during the tenure of former Secretary of State Hilary Clinton, according to a newly released Inspector General report.

The $6 billion in unaccounted funds poses a “significant financial risk and demonstrates a lack of internal control over the Department’s contract actions,” according to the report.

The alert, originally sent on March 20 and just released this week, warns that the missing contracting funds “could expose the department to substantial financial losses.”

Why, yes, I believe six billion clams might just constitute “substantial financial losses,” even for a monster government with a tentacle in everyone’s pocket, and a brace of deficit unicorns chained up in the Treasury basement.

How did this happen? Has anyone checked between the cushions of the couches at the palatial State Department headquarters? That’s where I often find my missing billions.

The report centered on State Department contracts worth “more than $6 billion in which contract files were incomplete or could not be located at all,” according to the alert.

“The failure to maintain contract files adequately creates significant financial risk and demonstrates a lack of internal control over the Department’s contract actions,” the alert states.

The situation “creates conditions conducive to fraud, as corrupt individuals may attempt to conceal evidence of illicit behavior by omitting key documents from the contract file,” the report concluded.

The State Department’s inability to properly file its paperwork is causing most of the losses, according to the report.

That’s so bitterly ironic, because the government becomes extremely upset when we don’t fill out our paperwork properly. Remember when they tried to bury small businesses under millions of pages of IRS expense reporting, to squeeze out a few more bucks for ObamaCare?

But when Derp Government has a few billion to throw around on contracts… eh, whatevs. The paperwork just kinda gets lost. Doubtless much of this money will eventually be found, but don’t worry about the funds that vanish for good… we’ll just raise somebody’s taxes to make up the shortfall, or maybe borrow some more cash from China, which will be able to buy another nuclear sub with the interest we pay them.

One of the reasons our loose money-no-object, budgets-optional approach to debt-fueled government is so dangerous is that it lets high-rolling bureaucrats get lax with the paperwork. The sort of $6 billion error that would annihilate pretty much any private company barely rates media coverage. Why should it? It’s not as if any other part of Derp Government’s agenda is going to suffer because they lost track of a few measly billions.

The Inspector General recommended State develop a centralized system for tracking contract files. Man, that does sound like a good idea. A few years ago, devices that would be invaluable for the creation of such a system were invented – they’re known as “computers.” The vast army of bureaucrats that works for the government could probably manage our money far more carefully, if they were equipped with these newfangled wonder gizmos.

Say, wasn’t the State Department heard to complain that it couldn’t afford adequate security for its facilities in Benghazi? Too bad they misplaced the billions of dollars they could have spent on that.