10/07/2008

The Plumber (could it be the end of an era?)

Plumbers are threatened and confounded by my porcelain toilet/ pull chain mechanism.
These plumbing pups have been brought up on the Home Depot variety and not the wisdom of the century old solution to fill and flush.
They think I'm just attached to it out of eccentricity.
They just don't know.
Today, I have a guy in baggy pants working here. There's been a leak.
This one is not charmed by wine. Wants no vinous love advice. Tells me no stories. Instead, he is cursing and bitching and saying the toilet has to come out. A new one has to go in. Not getting anywhere with me, he pulls my super over.
Joseph feels my pain yet listens. I can see he is filled with sympathy for me as the baggy panter whispers into his ear. I hear it and see Joseph give in. They are behaving as if they are conspiring to have me hospitalized and don't want me to know the men in white suits and butterfly nets are coming for me.
This is a sad day.
I know this will come to no good at all.
PART # 2
As the baggy panted man left, he winked (it's a thing, these days) and said with more than a touch of sadism, "Enjoy your new toilet."
The other was an elephantine, almost 1950's modern decanter of a heavy, sturdy porcelain toilet, with an admittedly ugly black seat and lid. While I loved the black and whiteness of the ensemble, it really had seen better days. Yet it had weight. It had soul. Now, there is an extremely cheap though quite clean toilet in its place. But the water tank and the pull chain lives on.
Thank you all for the tons of personal emails that poured in this morning.

I'm hunting the Leon Trotskys, the Philip Roths, the Chaucers and the Edith Whartons of the wine world. I want them natural and most of all, I want them to speak the truth even if we argue. With this messiah thing going on, I'm trying to swell the ranks of those who crave the differences in each vintage, celebrate nuance and desire wines that make them think, laugh, and feel. Welcome.

And, if you'd like a signed copy of either THE BATTLE FOR WINE AND LOVE OR HOW I SAVED THE WORLD FROM PARKERIZATION or NAKED WINE, feel free to contact me directly.