Femaleness and Swimwear Shopping

Good afternoon my bitches! I must apologize for the lengthy absence here, alas, life (and work) oftentimes gets in the way.

With that out of the way, let’s get down to business shall we? What an exciting (and at times a nit anxiety filled) weekend. The weather is starting to get downright toasty here are Summer fast approaches (it was 90 degrees yesterday) and I think everyone knows what that means. Yes, pool and swim season. And guess what my bitches? I went out bought some swimwear! Yikes!

It’s been on my mind a bit lately as I’m planning a trip to the Caribbean this Fall. I love snorkeling and am PADI certified and would love to immerse myself in those clear, warm waters again. But what to wear?

Between my undersized male breasts and my silicone forms I’ve found beach wear a bit of a dilemma. With the tops of most suits tending to “emphasize” a woman’s attributes, trying to go “au natural” will be (or seem to me) a bit obvious. As will stuffing any swimwear with my silicone forms. It’s one thing to hide the sides and color of the forms under a bra beneath a dress or a blouse, but with many swim tops, it would be quite evident that my bosom is anything but natural.

To that end I’ve been looking for tops that are a bit more modest such as rash guards, lap suits (image right) as they seem to have plenty of coverage. And as I said at the top of the post, it’s getting warm where I live so I sucked it up and a friend and I sent shopping.

Aside from being initially confused by the different sizing (we went to a plus-sized shop) it all went well. And that’s when it hit me. I was trying my second top and looking in the mirror and for the first time I did not see a male body staring back at me. I saw a female body. Then I put on the next top, and it fit! And it looked great! (See featured image). And as I was looking in the mirror I realized then: the size is just a number. I looked good in the top, it looked good on me, and it fit well. That is all that mattered. I was extremely excited and just wanted to get out of the store, go home, and go to the pool! I can’t remember a feeling of such “femaleness” since I transitioned and I love it! I love me! And I love my journey as Denise!