Despite the fact that we didn’t think anyone on the MovieSnobs staff would sit through Good Luck Chuck, Mike managed to do it and give it 0 stars…yes, zero. Here’s a tiny sampling of what he had to say,

Chuck is a waste of time, energy, and thought. Stay far away from this crap fest. No one should see this movie, ever. You’ll thank me.

If you like reading scathing reviews…this will surely entertain you, at least more than actually watching the movie would.

UltimateRollerCoaster.com has the news about a planned Dark Knight-themed roller coaster for the Six Flags parks. The coaster is expected to cost $7.5 million and will be the first indoor roller coaster at Six Flags New England. The coaster is also in the works for Six Flags Great Adventure in New Jersey and Six Flags Great America in Gurnee, IL.

According to UltimateRollerCoaster.com,

Six Flags says the excitement begins as guests venture through demented hallways of twists, turns and hallucinatory images, while they are tormented by The Joker himself. Then as they set foot onto a distressed, vandalized train platform, they can only guess at what awaits them as they speed through six 180-degree hairpin turns, climb unseen hills, plunge into pitch darkness and dip into unforeseen danger. And of course, in the midst of all this chaos it’ll be up to Batman himself to save you.

Of course, the coaster will be opened to coincide with the release of The Dark Knight in July 2008. As far as I’ve read, it will not be replacing the original Batman roller coaster (at left) at any of the parks. If it will be worth the three hour ride from my house to Six Flags New England, we’ll see.

Sex trafficking is very touchy subject that not too many films have the courage to dive into. While many of us don?t have the heart or strength to stomach something like this, I think that it’s important to become aware that this practice is still ongoing. This film is just a glimpse into the real-life horror of it.

Thirteen-year-old Adriana (Paulina Gaitan) lives near Mexico City, with her mother and brother. After bringing his sister a bicycle for her birthday, much to his mother’s chagrin, the secret life of Jorge (Cesar Ramos) is revealed. He is a low-level hood who cheats and robs tourists along with his two wannabe hood friends.

Then we are taken to the airport in Mexico City, where two Polish girls are brought into the country, through a special agency. While they are being told that this is the easiest way for them to get transported to the States, the people that accompany them then take away their passports and force one of them into a car, thus giving us a hint of their true intentions.

Time to go back to Mexico. Against her mother’s wishes, Adriana rides her new bike and is followed by a black car. You can kind of guess where it?s going from here, when she is subsequently kidnapped. Until Jorge finds another child riding her abandoned bicycle, he had no clue what happened.

These two plots intertwine, and we are then shown how these people are treated while they are in captivity. They are kept in hiding, hauled around like cattle, and sold to deviant people for their own personal use. That?s the mildest way that I can put it. As the oldest of hostages, and a mother, Veronica (Alicja Bachleda-Curus), the girl kidnapped outside the airport, has become the protector, ?offering? herself in order for the others to be temporarily spared.

While Jorge is trying to find Adriana and is dealing with legal standstills, he meets Ray Sheridan (Kevin Kline), a Texas police officer who has been traveling throughout Mexico in much of the same areas that Jorge has gone to. Now, Ray’s life is pretty complicated and he has his own agenda. Nevertheless, he is determined to help, often in an unconventional manner. Because Jorge has been given the runaround in his rescue operation, you can bet that he is initially distrustful of any authority figure.

Don?t expect to be spared much in the disturbance and shock department. This is no laughing matter, so it wasn?t portrayed lightly. Nor should anyone take it that way either. Throughout the film, you are waiting for something worse and worse to happen, with no end in sight. It was heartbreaking and tragic. What’s even more so, are the statistics listed at the end of the film. Suffice to say, it’s a very important topic that needs to have as much attention paid to it as possible, so I do recommend that you see it. Another film that depicts these deplorable happenings was Lifetime’s 2005 movie, Human Trafficking , which was definitely more graphic and violent. Your heart and soul, as did mine, will ache, regardless which film you choose to see.

The most painfully unfunny hour and a half thus far this year. For a movie that boasts itself as a “comedy,” there’s little to nothing that’s actually funny about Good Luck Chuck. I honestly have no idea why I even bothered seeing this movie, I’m still trying to remember why I bothered.

Good Luck Chuck is about a dentist (played by the extremely unfunny, and untalented Dane Cook) who is a “good luck charm” for women who sleep with him. After they sleep with him, the next man they date, is the one they marry. Chuck has no problem with this, until he meets Cam, (played by an under-utilized Jessica Alba) the love of his live. The story continues, blah blah blah, romantic crap, the end.

Being someone who’s never worked in casting before in my life, I think I would have had a better chance at casting a better match than whoever cast Alba and Cook. They have the on-screen chemistry of orange juice and toothpaste. They’re not funny together, they don’t compliment each other well, you don’t believe they’d ever end up together in real life, they’re just two people thrown on-screen together, who you’re forced to believe are in love. I had an easier time believing Alba as a superhero who can turn invisible, than a woman falling in love with Cook’s crappy dentist character.

The movie’s boring. The entire time you just sit and think “How much longer can this movie possibly be?” It’s about 93 minutes too long. The story’s not clever, and not funny. Someone at the studio should have shot it down, before it even made it to their desk. The conversation should have happened as such:Script writer: Hey boss, I’ve got this great idea for a new comedy.Studio boss: Yea? Fill me in.Script writer: Okay, it stars Dane Coo…Studio Boss: You’re fired, get out.

I mean, seriously, come on. People stopped realizing Cook was even remotely funny about five years ago. Who cares if he has a million friends on MySpace? Who cares if he sells CDs to people who don’t know better? Who cares if he has a special on HBO? I certainly don’t, and you shouldn’t either. Cook is unfunny, and untalented. He is not an actor, he’s barely a comedian.

Good Luck Chuck is a suck-fest, to the extreme. I wouldn’t recommend this movie to someone whom I hated, and wanted to make them kill themself. This movie is so bad, that even now, thinking about it, I want to drive to Dane Cook’s house, light a bag of dogshit on fire, and throw it at his front door. I haven’t hated a movie this much, since I saw Broken Flowers. And it sucks that I hated it so much, because I generally like Jessica Alba. She generally picks good movie roles. Not this time.

Chuck is a waste of time, energy, and thought. Stay far away from this crap fest. No one should see this movie, ever. You’ll thank me.

A new picture has appeared over at 1-18-08.com of a Japanese chef. It flips over like the others do and /Film has all the details about what’s on the back and what it could mean.

At this point, I think J.J. Abrams is just screwing with us. I can picture him sitting at home watching late night TV and seeing an infomercial for the Ginsu knife and thinking he should add a picture to the official Cloverfield website.

We’d like to wish a very happy birthday to MovieSnob writer and co-founder Mike. Mike turns the ripe old age of 28 today and plans to spend his day playing Halo 3 like the rest of the country. Enjoy, Mike!