The weird world of politics: Mr McBoring

One of Siyahleba’s biggest fears – and of other hacks – is the day ­Number 1’s term ends and dull-as-paint McBuffalo takes over Luthuli House and the west wing of the ­Union Buildings. We fear losing our miserable jobs because politics will return to boring normalcy.

No more Nkandla, #paybackthemoney, multiple marriages, Guptas, etc.

Proof of this was his recent response to questions. Poor Lechesa Tsenoli, next to McBuffalo in the House, couldn’t stomach his monotonous ­answers any more. The man was captured on the Parliamentary monitors snoring away. Who could blame him?

Pot, kettle

Angry Aunt Helen Zille’s decision to cease subscriptions to the Cape Times has magically added a whole legion of press freedom ­defenders to the media’s army.

It has even prompted former ANC spokesperson Jackson “Don’t buy City Press, don’t buy” Mthembu to emerge from his Facebook slumber to accuse the DA of hypocrisy.

The spin doctor should tread ­lightly though. Many journalists still remember taking notes as he defended things like the media ­appeals tribunal – courtesy of the party that fought for freedom of expression in the bad old days.

Mbaks in a bunch

Siyahleba almost choked on our breakfast when we read the statement from the minister of parties and recreation, Honourable Razzmatazz, congratulating the Proteas for demolishing Sri Lanka and reaching the semis of the cricket World Cup.

“The Proteas will need more of our support. Those who labelled them chokers can now call them ‘bunch of semifinalist’ who are heading for a World Cup win,” said our overexcited partygoer.

Siyahleba just hopes that the serial selfie-taker doesn’t use the win as an excuse to book a trip to Australia at taxpayers’ expense to watch the Proteas in action.

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