There is healing in returning to our mother/daughter roles.
Mom recently turned 85. I hesitated before suggesting that we have a little gathering for her birthday. After all, this is the woman who was mad when dad threw her a surprise party with invitations that read: “Help Doris celebrate the 6th anniversary of her 39th birthday”. When I mentioned I was glad she wanted to … [Read more...]

“And now it’s done.”
When my mom’s father was in his mid-80’s I sat him down with his brother and sisters, fed them lunch and got them to talk about their lives. It was fun learning about their childhood, adulthood, and relatives long gone. And it was an incredible history lesson. Everyone had vivid memories of WWII, the Great Depression and where they were when they heard … [Read more...]

And not give into guilt.
Like most people, I struggle with setting boundaries. It is especially hard with an aging parent who may feel vulnerable or frightened if you are not around. But setting boundaries with your parent, co-worker, or anyone in your life, is critical to the self-care that must be a high priority for caregivers.
Request and expectations of others tug at … [Read more...]

What feelings to expect at the first signs your elderly parents need help.
Changes in your aging loved ones can be subtle at first. They start to forget appointments or names. They repeat the same story to you over and over again. You notice they are less organized, the house is messy, and their appearance maybe not be as put together. The realization sets in: “My aging … [Read more...]

Being a health advocate for parents with Alzheimers brings unique challenges.
If you follow this blog, you know our family story is one of congestive heart failure and not dementia. But the sheer number of caregivers I meet dealing with parents that have dementia is staggering. Over 5 Million Americans are living with Alzheimers and this number climbs if you include all forms … [Read more...]