23 októbra, 2008

It's been a while...

... since I posted the last time. Let me tell you what happened since then. Last time I did a real post (the last post before ŠPM) I talked about me having hard time in ministry. But there was a little sign of better times coming. So just let me tell you a little more about this and if some of you still don't know what I'm talking about here's a "little" summary:

Over a month ago our church had a youth conference that I really love. Every conference I've been to so far was a huge gain for my in my spiritual life. And so I was looking forward for this conference and the changes it was to bring. I didn't know what God had prepared for me but I knew (from the past experiences) it's going to be a milestone. And you can bet it was! Actually - the biggest one.

Right at the first day when we arrived to Košice (where was the conference) I began to read a book that was about serving the LORD and how this guy later realized he wasn't serving the way he thought he was and he was trying to please people that God. And in this book I just began to see myself and I got scared 'cause I realized that I turned away from God (the one that is to be served) to myself (the one that is to serve) and I kind of switched the positions. I used ministry so people could see how good I AM - and not God. Well I just got to say that none of this was intentional and the first time I realized this was that day of the conference.

Then I just saw how I was messing up with everything I was doing and that my ministry wasn't pleasing God at all. I was trying to take away from the glory of God. Actually I was steeling because the glory belongs to God only. That day I realized that if I ever want to serve Him again I have to change everything I thought was right about ministry and the way I ministered. But where to begin? I was so overwhelmed from what I realized that I ended up on my knees unable to do anything. As days went by and I was thinking where did I get into I felt really down and weak. But after a week or so I kind of heard God telling me:"Well, you had your time to realize what you've done wrong. Now is the time to stand back on your feet and to fight your enemy."And I realized that that's exactly what I need to do. Because what do we do when we realize we sin? We fight the sin! And so I went to the battlefield that took place in my heart to fight and win this fight for the glory of God!

And today I'm happy to tell you some important words:GOD IS GOOD!And He has showed me how much He can be. God healed my heart and made me able to serve Him once again. And not just that. He didn't just heal it. He even set it on the right place. He renewed my heart and made it able to serve to the One who is worthy to be served.