New Year’s resolutions are a tradition for many. I have always cautioned that resolutions may be a set up for disappointment. One can start out with the best intentions but actually know deeply that they have no intention of following through on a specific resolution.

Instead, perhaps resolve to be honest with yourself and see what happens in each moment of each day. As you navigate, surf each experience as you encounter it. Life promises no consistent compromise. It is you who must compromise. It is you who must muster your inner worth and strength, to master whatever you may encounter. No matter how challenging or delightful. Some people cannot handle delightful because they never had much of it as children. But, the good news is, that they can do it! You can too. Even the worst drug addict can take a good look in the mirror and decide that they want to power through their withdrawal, anxiety, and pain, to manage their challenges head on, no matter what. For those who cannot? A deeper disability exists, and they will always need more help than others.

It is by walking through the fires of challenge, when we encounter them, that we do succeed to the next level of our individual self-accomplishment. You will know it too. When you hit that experience of getting through something so difficult, it burns you to your core to deal with it. However, once you get through it, no matter how searingly uncomfortable, you do know that you have mastered something deep within yourself. And until you do? You will replay elements of that story, issue, challenge, over and over until you manage it once and for all. Then move on! We’ve all been there. It is part of normal human growth and development.

So, cut yourself some slack for being human, and try your best every day. Be brutally honest with yourself in every moment, and you will choose better and fare better too. With every setback, with every failure, you are exercising your self-mastery skills and getting even closer to the goals you actually want. Just like learning to read English words. You stumbled until you understood how to read English. You will do the same, from now on, with everyday experiences.

In 2017, how do we deal with ‘the veil’ coming down? i.e. Crooked politicians, big banks screwing people over, Big Pharma jacking prices and forcing meds many do not want nor need? How do we deal with all the app upgrades constantly? With the outdated technology as soon as you get used to your device? The tracking of our every move? The controlled and biased corporate media? The pollution of our drinking water, rivers, lakes, streams oceans, food, soil, and air by fracking and chemical dumping? How do we deal with all the plastic trash everywhere? How do we deal with the roller-coaster of awful truths? For example, the deep revealing of racism and bigotry in this country beyond what every progressive person compartmentalized, and denied existed, in the shadows of our society. It is overwhelming.

What we must do, is examine those elements within ourselves and make peace with our self. If you think you are free of those elements already, then you must not “hate Trump” or his supporters. Or, you must not “hate Blacks, Mexicans, Muslims, or White people” either. Perhaps you feel “men are all insensitive” or “women are all overly emotional and out of control.” Whatever your preconceptions are, examine them.

You don’t have to like everyone, but you do have to respect that individuals make their own decisions and you cannot control that. You can only make decisions day to day, to ensure your own well-being and whole health, even if that includes others close to you. Then, you will be able to look at those you dislike and be able to see that they are people struggling to fit in. Struggling with their own; identities, confusion, insecurities, pain, and self-esteem issues.

We cannot fix everyone else, but we can realize their battles are theirs. The White supremacist is on his own journey of self-discovery. It is when that person begins to hurt others that they have to be held accountable. Compassion is not being a doormat. It is never compassionate to let others be abusive. However, it is only when a violent or neglectful person becomes aware and asks for help, that they can transform into peaceful and attentive beings.

We each have to manage our own responsibilities. You can only be available to others if you are first available to yourself. Be available to your community, only once you feel strong enough. Because the world does need your contribution. Wherever you are. You know what doing your part will be. Your non-violent contribution for inclusive social progress is important. Find a way to participate in your community for better change. It is a starting place.

Begin to think outside the box, of how you can create a different model for yourself. Maybe drop the facade. Be more genuine. Begin to speak authentically. Find greater meaning in your day to day life. Perhaps you move to the woods. Maybe you engage people who believe in fossil fuels instead of Clean Energy, for example. Introduce them to new eco-aware experiences they may have never had.

Maybe, do your own work, focus on getting yourself even more organized and content with where you are. Do you constantly need to buy new stuff? Or do you actually need a good organic meal, or a massage, or a walk in nature? Do you need to connect with yourself at the core? Or do you need to connect with another genuine person, who can share relevant discourse with you? And thus, you will be working towards the bigger picture. For the greater good of all.

Aura Walker is a seasoned mental health counselor and holistic health expert. She specializes in the use of hypnotherapy for rapid healing in short term care. Write to her, and she may feature your question or problem in her Yo! Venice column: “Ask a Hip Hypnotherapist.” E-mail [email protected] or call 310.382.6313.

Yo! Venice! was started by two friends, Keri and Bret, to create a communal blog for residents of Venice Beach California.
In today’s world of RSS feeds, they felt that a blog would be a perfect place for people to let others know how they view the Venice Beach community through words and pictures. It is hoped that this site will become a communal blog with many people submitting stories for all in the community to share.