Saturday, October 27, 2007

Trick or treat....... Bought a black 2 door 900.....In 1960,drove it more then 150 thousand miles. Wife had one of these for years..

A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married?Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman ...I guess I've been looking for the perfect girl.""Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least on girl that you wanted to marry.""Yes, there was one girl .. once.I guess she was the one perfect girl .The only perfect girl I really ever met.She was just the right everything .. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me.""Well, why didn't you marry her," asked the friend."She was looking for the perfect man," he said.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Its purpose was to provide a crossing of the Blue Ridge Mountains for the Virginia Central Railroad.Overseen byClaudius Crozet as chief engineer , the crossing was accomplished by using four tunnels, including the 4,263-foot (1,299 m) Blue Ridge Tunnel near the top of the pass.

With construction proceeding from either side, the complex was dug though solid granite with only hand drills and black powder, a decade before the invention of dynamite.

The tunnel was less than a half-foot (0.1 m) off perfect alignment when it was holed-through

on Christmas Day 1856.When complete, it was the longest in the US and one of the longest tunnels in the world,

a remarkable feat of engineering.

Opened to rail traffic in April of 1858, it was considered to be one of the engineering

wonders of the modern world.

A Newer Tunnel was put in in 1944...And is in use today....(The new one was 4ft. off

Saturday, October 20, 2007

There is only one of these cars in the world, a Maybach Exelero. price=8 million us.

Laughter is like changing a baby's diaper.It doesn't permanently solve any problems,but it makes things more acceptable for awhile.~~~~

A auto mechanic, received a repair order that read:Check for clunking noise when going around corners."Taking the car out for a test drive, he made a right turn,and a moment later heard a clunk.He then made a left turn and again heard a clunk.Back at the shop he opened the trunk and soon discovered the problem.Promptly he returned the repair order to the service manager with this notation: "Remove bowling ball from trunk."

Monday, October 15, 2007

Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25 year- old blonde who knocks everyone'ssocks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm.She hangs onto Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word.His buddies at the club are all aghast.At the very first chance, they corner him and ask,"Bob, how did you get the trophy girlfriend?" Bob replies, "Girlfriend? She's my wife!"They're amazed, but continue to ask."So, how did you persuade her to marry you?""I lied about my age," Bob replies "What, did you tell her you were only 50?"Bob smiles and says, "No, I told her I was 90."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous,harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin."Where the hell have you been?" she asked."You'll have to pack all your things, dear," he said."I've just lost you in a card game.""How did you manage to do that, genius?"she asked sarcastically."It wasn't easy," he told her."I had to fold with a royal flush."

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Ed and Ted went to the fair.They came across a small crowd gathered around a stall and went over to take a look."What's going on?" Ed asked one of the crowd."We're watching to see if some idiot can ride that bronco machine," he said nodding towards a fearsome looking machine."Nobody has managed to stay on for the full three minutes yet.And there's a prize of $1000 for anybody who can."I can do that!" Ed said confidently."No you can't," said Ted."I sure as hell can!" said Ed."You'll get yourself killed if you try and ride that monster," said Ted."Watch this," said Ed and climbed aboard the bronco machine.The machine thrashed wildly, up and down, from side to side, around in circles but still a grim-faced Ed clung to its back.After two minutes the machine was bucking almost vertically and spinning until Ed was a blur. But when the three minutes were up Ed was still on the machine's back acknowledging the cheers and cries from the small crowd.He dismounted, collected his winnings and rejoined Ted."Where in hell did you learn to ride a bucking bronco like that!?" Ted asked."Remember three months ago," Ed said..."When my wife had whooping cough...?"

Sunday, October 7, 2007

To all my Canadian friends.....Have a great Thanksgiving weekend.... Holy Painted Eyebrows, Batman! Foggie sunrise.....

Dining out one evening, I noticed some teenagers celebrating at a nearby table.When one girl pulled out a camera, I offered to take picture of the group.After one photo, I suggested taking another just in case the first one didn't come out."Oh, no, that's okay," she said, as she took back her camera."I always get double prints."Yep, they walk among us....and they reproduce.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Monday, October 1, 2007

I wish I still had mine just like this one. Toco Bell cat..... Bad to tha bone.....

A pretty young blonde visiting her new doctor for the first time found herself alone in a small waiting room.She began undressing nervously, preparing herself for the upcoming examination.Just as she draped the last of her garments over the back of a chair, a light rap sounded on the door and a young doctor strode in.Coming to an abrupt halt, the doctor looked his nude patient up and down carefully, with considerable appreciation."Miss Smith," he said finally, "it seems quite obvious to me that until today you have never undergone an eye examination."