This reporter has been told that Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has metastatic rhabdomyosarcoma, an aggressive cancer that has "entered the end stage". The information and the quote come from a highly respected source close to Chavez and who is in a position to know his medical condition and history. This source says the prognosis is dire and that Chavez is now not expected to live "more than a couple of months at most." Chavez is running for re-elec tion in Venezuela but several sources--including the one who revealed the exact kind of cancer-- have told me that they believe it is doubtful the dictator will live to see the results.

Voting is scheduled for October 7th. Chavez has been treated three times in Cuba but the exact kind of cancer has been a closely guarded state secret.

Reporter's note: There is only one source for identifying the cancer and for the prognosis quoted in the first part of the above story. This is a person whom your reporter has very good reason to trust, but you should know that there is only one source so far; no other immediate confirmation. All sources asked for and were granted anonymity because to reveal their names could place them in danger or, at the very least cost them their positions.

There is only one source for identifying the cancer and for the prognosis quoted in the first part of the above story. This is a person whom your reporter has very good reason to trust, but you should know that there is only one source so far; no other immediate confirmation. All sources asked for and were granted anonymity because to reveal their names could place them in danger or, at the very least cost them their positions.

There is only one source and all of them are in danger.

Dan types this "news" as he thinks it up. He could use a single editor, who would all think he's an idiot.

And when Chavez dies of cancer, which everybody on earth knows is imminent, Dan will tell himself and everybody who will listen, that he was first with the exclusive.

"This reporter has heard that reservations have been made in a place that's hotter, well, hotter than a Times Square Rolex. Frankly it's hotter than the hinges to the gates of Hell, hotter than the Devil's anvil because it is Hell. Well, you've heard the old saying, "Don't taunt the old dictator `til you've crossed the creek" but Chavez's deathbed is like a sauna--all he can do is wait and sweat. He's got his back to the wall, his shirttails on fire and the bill collector's at the door. He was laying all cattywhompus on ..." (redacted, earthy homilies go on for several pages)

Is Venezuela’s health care system so bad Chavez had to get treatment in Cuba? I despise commies but after watching my mom, dad and little brother die from cancer I hope he finds Jesus before it’s time to go.

Reporter’s note: “There is only one source for identifying the cancer and for the prognosis quoted in the first part of the above story. I cannot identify it right now because I just pulled it out of my butt.”

25
posted on 05/30/2012 10:50:23 AM PDT
by freedomlover
(Make sure you're in love - before you move in the heavy stuff)

I tend to be skeptical of reports like these: too much of an opportunity for there to be a miracle recovery (right before the election) that somehow demonstrates the superhuman quality of an annointed leader and convinces the illiterate peasantry that it’s their duty to vote for him. So sorry, I’ll wait until the guy is confirmed at room temperature to take news like this without a grain of salt.

Couldn't happen to a nicer fella.Hey,Comrade Chavez....don't you wish you had gone to Spain for your treatment like Castro did! Another tribute to what that fat slob from Flint,Michigan calls the best health care in the world!

I tend to be skeptical of reports like these: too much of an opportunity for there to be a miracle recovery (right before the election) that somehow demonstrates the superhuman quality of an annointed leader and convinces the illiterate peasantry that its their duty to vote for him.

If Chavez wished to feed a story to the American media, whom would he likely pick? A well known reporter who is easily taken in by things like forged documents, but who still enjoys a loyal following on the left.

It will truly please me watching the Venezuelan people demanding the government stop sending their money propping up the Castro Dictatorship. With Chavez gone the Castros know their time is near. They also know that there is every chance that the good people of Cuba will do a “Ceausescu” in them!

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