So a new year is upon us, and every year I am amazed at how many people say “good riddance to last year, it was terrible. I hope this new year will be better.” The funny thing is that it is the same people saying this same sentence every single year.

The thing is that every year is going to contain bad things. You will most likely experience upsets, illness, boredom, frustrations, arguments or maybe even a loss of some description. You will also experience laughter, love, contentment and a whole host of other good things besides. You will never experience 365 days of sameness, even if the content of your life doesn’t change, how you feel about it will change, repeatedly.

Lets say you could have the one thing that you feel would make you happy, what ever that may be. It could be money, the perfect partner, the best job, it doesn’t matter. If you had it now, but nothing else, you would begin to get bored with it within a very short space of time. Lets take money as an example. If you suddenly had all the money in the world, yes, it would be novel and exciting to start with but within a few months that newness will have gone and spending money will have soon become a drudge. You will then look to a new challenge for a bit of excitement, or you will focus on what you haven’t got. Maybe you want love or happiness or contentment. However much money you have wont buy you that. You will have to physically make that happen by the things that you do. If you do not make it happen by the end of the year then you can focus on it and say that the past year was awful.

If you really had to think about it and you were pressed to remember all of the great things that had happened in the last 12 months, I am absolutely sure that you could think of many things that would bring a smile to your face. They don’t have to be momentous life changing occasions, just small, simple things that when you add them all up add real spice to your life. Things such as spending some time with someone who was lonely. Maybe you gave to charity or even participated in raising money for charity. Perhaps you spent some time in someone’s company that you don’t particularly like, yet by doing so you brought a little bit of sparkle to them, just for that small amount of time. Maybe you made new friends or started a new relationship. Perhaps you did one or two things at work that was outstanding at the time. Maybe you helped someone in their hour of need; when they were poorly or grieving. There are so many things that you will have done that when you remember them now will make you feel humble. When we focus only on what we have lost or what we haven’t got we will of course feel like we have missed out. yet there will still be hundreds of other things to feel grateful for.

if you thought about it now, what do you currently have which you are taking for granted? Everyday things that you have gotten used to being there but if they were suddenly gone, you would miss them like crazy? Your health? Your partner? Children? Job? Friends? Money? It is these things that you need to be focusing on instead of what hasn’t happened for you or what you have lost.

New year is a time for making resolutions. If you make one resolution, make it to be grateful for all of the things that you do have around you. The ability to go out and get the things that you don’t have. The opportunities that will come your way, whether you take them or not. Your happiness lies within you – not in things or people. It is your choice whether you want to be happy or sad. If you make the choice to be sad and focus on what you don’t have, then at least be happy with being sad.

If things haven’t been going your way, then make a concerted effort to change that. Put the effort in to doing things differently, thinking differently and meeting different people. Sameness breeds contempt and boredom. Make your life exciting and do something different.

Here’s to a new year and a new start. Go and do something amazing. You’ll be glad you did.