The Dude’s birthday is next week, and I’m trying to decide what sort of cake to make this year, and I’m leaning, for whatever reason, towards a pistachio cake (like this one, not one made from instant pudding). Every year I’ve done a different cake, but always with the same idea: provide something delicious and wish-on-able.

My own birthday isn’t until next month, but I don’t feel the need to wait for cake. I’m an equal opportunity wisher: on birthday candles, on the first star (or stationary satellite), when the clock reads 11:11, whenever. It’s probably the closest I get to religious about anything.

With multiple chances to wish for something every day, one can get a bit indiscriminate: “I wish that the Dude will think getting pizza for dinner is a good idea,” (duh, easy) or “I wish that my hair will look good tonight.” (That one’s hit-or-miss.) But if I had to go by the old, fairy-tale rule: three wishes, and three only–no wishing for more wishes!–what would they be?

Would I really be shallow and self-centered and wish for a beautiful, luminous complexion, like I did all the time as a teen (and, okay, as a grown-ass woman)? Would I go big picture and wish for world peace or an end to hunger? Or something in between and sort-of practical minded, like wishing that marginal tax rates for the top 10% of earners was set at the same rate it was in the 1950s? I guess I could do one of each, but right now, I’m tempted just to wish, three times, for a job that will pay me what I’m worth and won’t destroy my soul.

So, for today’s FFT: what are your three wishes? They can be small or large, personal or altruistic, practical or absurd, kind or cruel (although let’s not slip into eliminationist rhetoric, okay?). Are these life-long wishes, or just-for-today desires?

I’ll be posting this at 11:11 and wishing that you all have a lovely weekend.

I’ve found that I’m pretty crappy at determining what will bring me happiness (too susceptible to cultural brainwashing in that regard), so the only wish I ever make anymore is for happiness in the hopes that life will continue to surprise me with different and unexpected sources.

Not to be a downer, but: I wish grad school would stop sucking so hard. I wish my boyfriend didn’t have to go to the other side of the country for an internship this summer and leave me to be a lonely cat lady. I wish my government could stop being so persistently, pervasively full of fuckery or that I could stop caring.

I wish I hadn’t read the first paragraph of this post. I just ruined my birthday surprise! Mmm, pistachio cake…

@BeckySharper – I don’t think wishing for an easy death for friends and family is morbid at all. It comes from experience.

@baraqiel – Ditto about wishing grad school would stop sucking. In my case, I should flip it around and wish that I would stop sucking at grad school. Because I am a pretty crappy student. (PhDork can testify to that.)

My world-changing wish is for “socialism” and “labor” and “unions” to stop being treated like dirty words in this country.

My selfish consumerist wish is for the new 15″ MacBook Pro, fully loaded with Adobe CS5. The Dude can dream…

I always get freaked out that my wishes will be perverted ala “The Monkey’s Paw.” I spend way too much time trying to figure out how my wish could go horribly wrong (money comes in the form of a life insurance policy on someone you don’t want dead, world peace = being the only one left alive, etc).

1. I wish I was a little bit taller
2. I wish I was a baller

wait, no, that’s the joke version…and poor grammar.

1. I wish I were suddenly an awesome skater. I’m getting sick of roller derby only using me for my mind.

2. I wish the budget would be balanced by taxing the rich and leaving Planned Parenthood, NPR, and school teachers alone. (stolen – but hey – I stay up at night worrying about PP)

3. I wish I had a CANCEL button on my remote that allowed me to cancel shows that no one should ever watch.

1. I wish that I were wealthy beyond the dreams of avarice. Really, I cannot overemphasize my crass lust for material comforts. And I want to get them in a way that doesn’t involve some kind of horrifying Monkey’s Paw/Devil’s Bargain scenario, as AmBam mentioned earlier.

2. I wish to live well and die, untroubled, in my sleep.

3. Oh, and I guess I wish for general peace and widespread prosperity. Frankly I think it’s embarrassing that our species doesn’t have that yet. You’d think we’d have something workable figured out by now.

I wish my dad’s fibromyalgia would resolve over night, but barring that I wish that he would get on board with the pain management techniques, rather than being miserable because he doesn’t have time to sleep 8 hours or take a walk.

I wish for better friends for my little sister and less college-related drama in general.

@AmBam – do you also want a girl with a big avocado? (whatever the hell that might be/whatever the hell the real lyrics are.)

I’d wish to turn back time for my ancient horse, because he’s really starting to show his age and it sucks. I’ve had him for 23 years and I’d love to have him around for another 23.

a nice little house with a secure garden so the cats can play outside (they’d never been out when I got them and I think they’re too old to learn about roads), but without the hassle of moving, because I hate moving house with a burning passion.

To have enough independent income to let me go back to working with horses, which was and is my vocation but 1) it doesn’t pay enough for a half-decent lifestyle and 2) having broken my neck once and walked away from it, I didn’t want to take the risk of another injury leaving me unable to do it and too entrenched in the industry to change careers, because employers see equestrian jobs, ignore the degree in linguistics and the transferrable skills and instantly think you’re fit for nothing but patting ponies and shovelling manure.

I wish everyone could have the joy I do: wonderful friends and family, the chance to pursue my dreams, health insurance, a roof over my head, nutritious and tasty food to eat, books to read, and the time and money for completely frivolous things.

Happy Birthday, Dude!

@rodriguez, Becky Sharper, and JP: If I had a time machine, I’d admit Hitler to art school.