How To Speak Australian

Should you, an American, ever happen to wash up on the shores of Australia, the first thing you should keep in mind is that people have smartphones there, so you probably don’t need to rely on animals to help you find your way. Even if you’re not totally sure how to speak Australian, standard English should work just fine.

The second thing you should keep in mind is that while Americans and Australians both speak English, they don’t entirely speak the same language.

For one, Australians have a charming habit of abbreviating words, or giving everything a nickname, and giving nicknames to nicknames. For instance: “afternoon” becomes “arvo,” “breakfast” becomes “brekkie,” “mosquito” becomes “mozzie,” and your name would almost certainly have an “ie” tacked on at the end. As a matter of fact, it was Australia that gave us the word “selfie.”

Apparently, as legend would have it, these abbreviations were invented through necessity — more specifically, the need to clench your teeth to keep the blow flies from getting in your mouth. Many of these diminutives are just as long, if not longer, than the original words, so this probably isn’t entirely true. It’s an aesthetic, but also something more. The relaxed, informal nature of Australian slang points to a deeper truth about the culture. Australian humor is about “taking the piss out of someone,” or ribbing them. To be Australian is to not take life — or yourself — too seriously, which makes the Australian brand of sarcasm occasionally difficult to detect for some overly earnest Americans.

“Australians are really dry and sarcastic, so half the stuff we say is a joke,” said Raj Barker, an Australian expat living in New York City. “Our humor is about putting people down, but in a joking way. That’s why Americans can sometimes get offended by us.”

Beyond its unpretentious candor, Australian slang is also fairly crude, but who knew there were so many applications for the word “piss,” and what else would you expect from a language that’s here to take you down a few pegs?

Without further ado, here is a brief field guide to Australian English for your next journey to Oz.

It’s pissing down: It’s raining

A bit dusty: Hungover

What a pearler: What a beauty

Ocker: Someone who speaks crudely

Chuck a U-ey: Make a U-turn

Chockers: Full to the brim

She’ll be right: She’ll be okay

Sweet as: Good (As in: “How’s your day?” “Sweet as”)

Yeah nah: No

Nah yeah: Yes

Sheila: A woman you admire and respect (As in: “She’s a top Sheila”)

Cooked: Tired, had enough

To have a face like a dropped pie: Ugly

To have a face like a burnt thong (flip-flop): Ugly

To have a face like a smashed crab: Ugly

Going off like a frog in a sock: Lively, hopping (As in: “This party’s going off like a frog in a sock”)

Steph is a writer, lindy hopper, and astrologer. She’s also a language enthusiast who grew up bilingual and had an early love affair with books. She has mostly proved herself as a New Yorker, and she can introduce herself in Swedish thanks to Babbel. She also speaks Russian and Spanish, but she’s a little rusty on those fronts.

Steph is a writer, lindy hopper, and astrologer. She’s also a language enthusiast who grew up bilingual and had an early love affair with books. She has mostly proved herself as a New Yorker, and she can introduce herself in Swedish thanks to Babbel. She also speaks Russian and Spanish, but she’s a little rusty on those fronts.