Dear Mister Language Person: What Is The Purpose Of The Apostrophe?

Answer: The apostrophe is used mainly in hand-lettered small business
signs to alert the reader than an S is coming up at the end of a
word, as in: WE DO NOT EXCEPT PERSONAL CHECK'S, or: NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR
ANY ITEM'S. Another important grammar concept to bear in mind when
creating hand- lettered small-business signs is that you should put
quotation marks around random words for decoration, as in TRY OUR HOT
DOG'S, or even TRY OUR HOT DOG'S.
-- Dave Barry, Tips for Writer's

So Richard and I decided to try to catch [the small shark].
With a great deal of strategy and effort and shouting, we managed to
maneuver the shark, over the course of about a half-hour, to a sort of
corner of the lagoon, so that it had no way to escape other than to
flop up onto the land and evolve....