Relationship Red Flags

On February 22, 2017

A good relationship is a precious and sometimes fragile thing. You and your partner share great intimacy and want to help, not hurt, one another. Right?

Some behaviors are automatic red flags for anybody anytime. Violent outbursts, drinking too much too often, drug use, sudden eating disorders… these are all automatic red flags a person needs to make some personal changes and better choices. In a relationship, though, you have the chance to notice more subtle signals that hint at the need for more help before the hurt comes. If your partner does something contrary to what you know is normal, don’t let it slide.

Here are some examples of relationship red flags. Catch these early and keep your relationship healthy, happy, and whole.

Aries: Active, gung-ho Aries is no couch potato, so if it’s hard to drag your Aries partner out of the house and away from the TV or computer, it’s a red flag.

Gemini: The last thing to expect effervescent, chatty Gemini to do is to clam up and go quiet on you. Claims of “leave me alone, I’m thinking” don’t cut it. Red flag!

Cancer: Eating disorders of any kind are a red flag for anyone, but when the Cancer appetite collapses and there’s a general disinterest in all and any food, it’s a serious bad sign.

Leo: The Leo partner likes and needs attention. If your Leo tries to be inconspicuous, hides, starts wearing too much black (other than as a fashion statement), it’s a red flag.

Virgo: Systematic, methodical Virgo takes pleasure in tidiness and order. When a Virgo gets scattered and bounces from one interest/project/task/destination to the next, that’s a Virgo red flag waving.

Libra: Friendly accommodating Libra rarely forces any opinions on anyone, so if your Libra partner suddenly turns argumentative and uncompromising, take it as a red flag.

Scorpio: This sign has a frugal, economical streak that might be hard for anyone except a close partner to appreciate. If your Scorpio begins spending recklessly (by their past standards), you’re entering red flag territory.

Sagittarius: Generous, gregarious Sagittarius can usually juggle a dozen balls and not drop a one. If your Sagittarius partner is getting obsessed with details or bogged down by daily life, take it as a red flag.

Capricorn: Hard-working, focused Capricorn is the last sign to sink into pointless restlessness. If your Cap has spells of not getting it together and can’t get things done, it’s a major red flag.

Aquarius: Universally generous Aquarius can be charitable to a fault, and to a partner’s annoyance. If your Aquarius shows strong signs of “me first” behavior and acts with selfishness, that’s a red flag.

ALL SIGNS:We’re all human and subject to the occasional meltdown, so if you’ve spotted a red flag, don’t panic. Your first reaction shouldn’t be to pack your bags and sneak out in the night. A lot of these red flags can be approached with a kind word of concern. Let your partner know that you notice a change and that you care enough to help.