I told him I didn't want to and didn't feel comfortable and he forced me down and held my head so that I couldn't get up. He told me he has needs and it was my job as a girlfriend to fulfill them. He told me he loved me and was going to marry me and I was so blind and naive that I believed him.

About 3 weeks later I found out I was pregnant, he was going to buy me an illegal abortion pill online. I decided that was not safe and went to my parents and told them what had happened (my friend asked me to keep her and her boyfriend out of it, considering they were there that night) so I did as instructed and told the police I didn’t know the attacker, which was a dumb mistake. I finally came out and told the truth. Anyways, she told them it never happened and they believe her since I lied about not knowing him.

As I look back, with hindsight always being 20/20, I should have screamed, yelled, hit, kicked….done something other than been silent. There were other individuals in the house where this happened and yet, I was quiet…not wanting to make a scene. I should have told someone…anyone. But, I was silent. I lived with this silent pain for so many, many years. I had nightmares…I was afraid to see “Q” out and about…I was afraid that he would hurt me again.

My whole act flew out of the window and I was struggling to cope, until I decided to start a blog, sharing my story and all its details with the world. This way I've been able to speak out about myself, without those judging eyes, without the questions. And it's made me feel better. Finally I'm starting to feel like I can be a person again.

These three experiences are probably nothing compared to what someone else has been through, but for me they mean a lot. They’ve made me who I am, and I hate it. I’ve hates wearing dresses since that day, I refuse to. I had my first kiss stolen from me. All these experiences have each left their mark on me. I hate being in large crowds, I get panic attacks. Every attack on a human, Big or small, it leaves its mark.

A few days later he told me he will leave pics around the neighberhood for other kids to see. I begged him not to and was scared at the thought of others seeing me doing that. I said I’ll do anything to not show those pics, he replied hmmm let me think! He said if I did the same thing everyday before work for him he could refrain from showing them.

He then told me that most of my facial features were that of a girl and men here would love that. I punched him but then he punched me back in my stomach so hard that I've got this purple bruise which hurts even when i twitch a muscle. I blacked out at that point and he juat took of my shorts and then assaulted me for what seemed like hours.

At school he would grab my butt, he would say things into my ear to get to me, one time he slammed me into the bathroom wall and punched me in the face. I went back a couple months later. We were fine until he forced himself on me again this happened 3 more times before I told the police.

Basically, since I lost my virginity, despite being raped, and was unable to wed my first rapist (he was my father after all),so I deserved death. Since I was unable to scream when it was happening, it didn't count as rape, so I was a whore who deserved death.

I have always felt guilty for not telling a teacher earlier and I have felt responsible for the girls beside me being exposed to this. One of the girls attempted suicide a year after and I keep telling myself I am the reason.

I kept telling him to please get off and that's when he pulled my hair and dragged me to the edge of my bed. I kept saying no no no and no over again but I guess he was hard of hearing that day. I was frightened but I still managed to break my arm free of his grip.

That's how things started but it began to escalate. He would began to pressure me give him handjobs and perform oral sex. I started to tell him no, and I didn't want to. But he would force my head down, or say if I loved him I would. It didn't matter that I said no or was crying. He wouldn't stop until he was done. Afterwards he would apologize for it, and say he didn't mean to.

When did he decide he was going to do it? When he saw me trying to get into the house? Was it a quick decision that he was going to take advantage of this situation that had presented itself? Has he done it again to other girls and women? I've tried looking him up on FB, just so I could see his face. I couldn't find him. I was curious for some reason if he had gotten married, had children. Was he still partying, abusing others? I needed to see a picture of my abuser. I needed to see a picture of the man that stole my innocence, that deprived me of something I had cherished.

I felt really bad about it and I blamed myself for it, I mean I did nothing about it.. ever since I don’t trust guys anymore. I don’t feel comfortable with my body anymore and I have serious trust issues.

I immediately cringed away. I said no. I told him that we were too young for this and I didn't feel right with it. He once again told me to stop making a fuss. I told him that I wanted to wait and he told me that i was overreacting.

es, I was drunk in a boys room, but he pursued me and attempted to rape my unconscious body. And that act I believe has changed my life, in some small way. Made me less worthy. More worthy of criticism and blame, lower moralled. Less worthy of love.

I just lied on the stairs, shaking and silent. James hugged me tightly and the other two went to tell the chief. A few weeks later, nothing wound up happening and he left on a plane to his next duty station.

I keep seeing him around college and around town and every time I see him I get tight in my chest and want to throw up, even though I'm not sure if it was even rape or assault or if it was just two teens under a bridge.

After a long silence, I decided he was asleep until I heard him say "You're like a woman my age trapped in a little girl's body". I didn't know if that was a weird compliment or how to respond. Before I could say anything more, he was on top of me.

It takes a long time to deal with the feelings of shame and hurt inside your mind. I have spent the last few years working on myself, and I’ve become closer to my 16 year old self. Despite what happened to her, she was positive, curious and creative. I wasn’t always as kind as I should have been. My first instinct was to fight back, and push away others, something I couldn’t do to my abuser. I was not a bad person, I was hurt. I needed help, not hate.

I washed my hands furiously to try to rid myself of this overwhelming feeling of being dirty.
At age fifteen, I didn’t know this was a crime. I didn’t know what sexual assault was. I just knew that what happened was not okay.

I spoke up at 4….my mother didn't believe me.
I spoke up at 13….my mother told me it was my fault for being friendly and open
I spoke up at 16….my mother told me that all women go through this and that is our lot in life

In my mind, I needed to justify this. Needed to prove to myself that they liked me at all and I didn’t totally just ruin my life. I kept spending time with them. Even to the point that rumors swirled at school. I lost all my friends at school and only depended on the guys more.

I'm a virgin, I do not think at all that J might want sex. Soon however he is touching me all over. I am less comfortable. This is not really what I want. I go along with it, afraid and embarrassed to stop something that I feel I am partly responsible for. I've led him on. Suddenly, things quite literally get out of hand. He's pushing his penis in to me and it's agony.

However,Deepika also revealed her depression story,in 2013,after which I revealed my depression status to the society in 2012. Are there same people with same feelings? Is Deepika inspired my story or Am I inspired by her.

For once I didn’t care if anyone said “I believe you” it only matter that I could say “I’m not ashamed and you can’t hurt me anymore”. This was what people meant when they said victims become survivors. It’s about more than just living through something, it’s about identifying strength over trauma but recognizing that this trauma is why you have strength.

A couple of months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of two years. I always had a feeling that something wasn’t right as our relationship continued, and now that I know for sure what happened to me was rape,

For years this went on. I blamed myself "I must of done something to show him I was interested" "maybe I should of stayed st home that night none of this would of happened" ofcourse I got worse and worse as the years went on.

The When You're Ready Project is a community for survivors of sexual violence to share their stories and have their voices heard, finding strength in one another. When you're ready to share your story, we will be here.