What followed was another one of my lectures that ended with him shaking his head. I

Still, despite the moans and groans and threats of putting me in a nursing home, I lecture anyway. I talk about what it means to be a good money manager. I encourage them not to overspend or go into debt. I stress the importance of saving.

Many students will be making their own money for the first time this summer, and so now is a great time for parents to discuss responsible money management with their children. Or maybe your child has already been working for a couple of summers. Are you seeing the development of good financial habits?

In a survey by the National Foundation for Credit Counseling, 28 percent of respondents said they learned the most about personal finance from their parents or at home. And in a T. Rowe Price survey, 28 percent of parents agreed with the following statement: "I am not good with money, so I should not be the one to teach my kids about money."

But you do matter. If you're not a good money manager, learn to become one. As you learn, teach your children, who will then teach their kids.

So just like his sister before him when she got her first job, my son was given the "now that you are earning your own money" talk:

On saving: From the very first paycheck, learn to save something. Anything. It's the most vital lesson I learned from my grandmother. Big Mama wasn't so much concerned at first with how much I saved, but that I develop this lifelong habit.

Have your child tie the savings to a specific goal.

On giving: He must tithe or give a tenth of his gross income to the church we attend. My husband and I make it a priority to donate to our church and charitable causes. We want to teach this custom to our children. My son already is a generous giver. But I reminded him that his giving will be more than he's used to and that to whom much is given, much is required.

If you encourage giving now as a regular part of a child's money management, it could become another lifelong habit.

On spending: I've talked to my son about watching what he spends on a daily basis. More money tends to spur the desire to spend more.

On splurging: In the end, I didn't discourage him from buying the iPad. I encouraged him to save up for it. I want him to have it, because I know he'll work hard and he should get something fun with his summer earnings. I want him to also learn that it's OK to splurge if you have the funds to do so. If you know me at all, you know that's one lesson that took me awhile to learn.

Contact Michelle Singletary, a financial columnist at The Washington Post, at michelle.singletary@washpost.com.

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