In The Days of King Lionheart

That time Loopy's thievery was useful

Waking up was a surprise by itself. Waking up in a carriage with three men glowering at me was something I could have lived without. Engaging in conversation with the one who clearly the leader I learned his name was Washing-ton Carver and his mother was the banshee we were hunting. He was very angry with us since the banshee had killed a few of his workers. O and also we had taken money from his safe. (Gene is a big tattletale) In return for him not tattling to Elzor we agreed to return with him to his mother’s family tomb and take care of the banshee by burning the body. We also learned that Loopy’s klepto tendencies were helpful as she was in possession of the item tying the Banshee’s soul to our reality.

After arriving in the nearby town of Bromley Grag ( what kind of name is that even), we arrived at some steps leading downwards. About ten feet down carved into rock were two huge doors. Carver explained that many generations of his relatives were buried in it and that it was dwarven work. He also said that treasure may be in the tomb but if we touched it then we would have bigger problems. Finally he decided he would hold Gene hostage against our good behavior. Really I think he just wanted to get us murdered but humans have been pretty crazy so far. Must just be me and other half humans that are not.

Anyways we walked into the tomb and I tripped into a pile of bones which led skeletons to attack us. Using my extensive arcane training (shooting chromatic orbs at merchant ships) I deduced that a malevolent aura in the tomb was causing other undead to rise and attack us. We walked until we hit a much larger room which had actual coffins as opposed to the hallway with doors we had just passed through. One of the tombs said Leon something on it but I had never heard of any Leon and there was no loot inside so prying it open was a huge waste of time.

We walked down a set of stairs heading deeper and deeper into the mauselum. The air was rank with black magic and fresh decayed body smell. It was incredibly unpleasant but after the sewers I was able to cope. When we walked down the stairs we saw a huge room with numerous coffins but the one at the other end was open. Loopy displaying classic gnome behavior ran to the coffin and was Instantly dragged in. Partyon and I did not have much time to help because one she was grabbed disgusting hands started grabbing at us! Luckily I used my wind magic and flew over the hands but a few of them kept grabbing my nice cloak! It was appalling. O and the mummy that rose from the tomb was also pretty not fantastic.

When it seemed like all hope was lost Gene ran into the room flanked by two dogs? He later told us that they came from his magic cloak but I think he ran into them outside the tomb. Either way the dogs distracted the mummy and the hands while Partyon Gene and I semi competently killed the mummy. Once this was done I learned how hard it is to use scorching ray to burn a magic ring. Who knew magical fire was so difficult to direct?

Thankfully we managed to burn the ring and once done watched the banshee’s soul depart this realm for the next one. She was a bitch. We then gathered up Loopy and left the tomb. Carver was thrilled to see us and thanked us for our sort of help. I told him he should call on us in the future and that I would donate a portion of my earnings to raising those workers. I hate incompetency and mine cost the lives of 3 people. I don’t plan on letting others die in the future.

Speaking of dieing Loopy is turning into a mummy since her frail gnome constitution can’t fight off undead germs. My friends and I are running with her now to the stables in hopes of finding someone who can heal her. I don’t want to fight another mummy anytime soon so I pray we find a person to turn our little kleptomaniac mummy back into a regular gnome.

Who knew a Banshee wouldn't light on fire

After hearing three not so rousing cheers from fellow taskers our little group turned to the far more important aspect of making money to pay guild fees. Elzor listed a few jobs but eventually we decided to take the job that paid the most money and made our way to the grain district. I wasn’t paying much attention but I’m pretty sure Elzor told us we would have to cleanse an evil spirit out of a grain silo. Sounded easy enough. It was not.

After a decent walk we arrived in the grain district. Unfortunately the silo we were supposed to cleanse was locked tight and the foreman (henry I think his name was) did not have the key. Loopy and I decided to take matters into our own hands as we broke into the office searching for the key. While in the office Partyon and Gene solved a riddle which let Loopy crack open the safe. This was fantastic threefold. One we found a key to the door. Two we (read loopy) found a lot of money and three the letter led Partyon to believe we were dealing with an undead called a Banshee. Sadly for all of us he did not tell us about it’s weaknesses but who knows what’s important to dragonborn.

Once we had the key we cracked the silo open but our problems instantly began anew. The inside of the silo consisted of a rounded room with platforms every ten feet on opposite walls. I am dexterous elf/man but I had no plans on leaping from platform to platform. After a few falls from the rest of the party (certainly not me), we split into two groups. Loopy and Gene scaled the outside of the silo using a ladder and rope and Partyon and I stayed inside and attempted to get to the top. Why? I have no idea.

Suddenly from above we heard Gene yelling that he had “detected an evil undead”. Who knew Paladins functioned like that? Seconds later I watched as Loopy dropped down onto platform 50 feet above my head. Then I saw nothing merely heard an incredibly loud scream followed by 2 thuds. One thud was Loopy collapsing on the platform. The second much louder thud was Partyon falling 50 feet to the bottom of the silo. It has not been a good week for ol’ blue.

This is where knowing that Banshees didn’t mind getting hit by fire would have come in handy. I threw my hands at it, muttered my spell and was in shock as two of the three rays that shot from my fingers were twice the size as normal. Maybe under pressure I perform better? Regardless the Banshee shrugged off the damage and it’s very hard to tell when a dead body is effected by something. Gene managed to smack it once before he too went down and it was up to me. Again I shot the Banshee with fire and again huge beams of flame shot from my hand and again the Banshee was not nearly as crispy as I would have liked. The Banshee looked at me and screamed one last time. I was effected by it’s ugliness and screams and I fell into unconsciousness. Sometimes one’s best just is not enough I suppose
Continued in Part 2 “Raen, Professional undead hunter”

Partyon's Bad Day

Much as the flowing river will weather even the mightiest stone, the outside world is shaping me. Before I left Ng Mui, before I left my home, my life was constant harmony. Now I have been forced into the company of thieves and strangers to better myself before facing the evil Bak Mei.

The summoner in the dragon mask disappeared before we were able to detain him, but Felix is safe now. We killed the cultists and even felled the monster that they brought to deal with us. Our good news was not to reach Elzor’s ears unaccosted, however.

Upon our exit from the dragon’s den, a group of city guards led by a particularly duty bound captain brought us to their jail for protecting Felix. They were upset that we had done their job for them, so as punishment they made us clean up a strange mess in their sewers.

The cherry blossom looks beautiful in spring, but when summer’s breeze begins to blow no petal can cling to the tree. Before I left Ng Mui I was the best fighter, undefeated in the sparring ring. When I descended below Breton I was bested by a toad, a goblin, even almost a snake. This world is doing its best to shape me; I need to know when to bend in the breeze and when to stand tall.

The task that the captain of the guard gave to us was simple: find the one who was calling himself the Rat King and either arrest or kill him. The sewer was a strange place, full of all sorts of monsters and lost histories. We found a tomb, which Loopy and Raen happily looted. Loopy discovered some cages which were not nearly big enough for a full grown man. The only consolation with those cages was that they did not look like they had been used in years.

At home a stubborn ogre might have been some sort of metaphor that the elders would use to help us learn how to compromise and expand our minds. Outside the monastery a stubborn ogre is a particularly dumb beast named Jef who sits in the darkness below Breton stirring soup for some unknown man.

After far too much conversation we were finally able to get Jef to tell us that he had killed the old Rat King and had accidentally inherited the mantle. By this point the four of us did not want to go about fighting an ogre, particularly not one as friendly and welcoming as Jef. We collected the old Rat King’s medallion and headed back above ground.

The officers were so pleased with the information that we brought back that they requested our help in the future. We were told that some day in the near future a task would come to us to map and clean out the entire sewer system before the city. Truly a more just and noble cause has never been offered to me or many of my new friends.

The fireworks that blast over the full moon do nothing to increase the joy of the catfish who has eaten his fill. The lords of Breton may celebrate their pampered lives, but nothing has brought me more happiness then when Elzor presented my new companions and I with Tasker badges to call our own.

Felix looked nervous. He always has so far. Partyon looked as if he wanted to comfort Felix but could not due to the circle. Loopy looked slightly shocked at all the blood and I swear I heard her mutter vampires a few times. Gene has a scarf so I can’t read his expressions ever.And I? I was annoyed. Here we were having come back, gone above and beyond the call of duty (stupid Orcs) and it didn’t seem as if our customer would be able to recover his wits to tell us how to get paid. Luckily Partyon began reassuring him while at the same time terrifying him. I must ask him if he does this on purpose.
While Loopy went downstairs to get the letter, Felix informed us that men in brown robes had broken into his house and murdered his butler. While I felt for the guy I maintained it was best for us to go back and get paid. Partyon disagreed. Something about “blah blah keep Felix safe blah blah not safe blah blah honor of the dragon born” At least I think it was like that. I zoned out after a bit. Luckily I convinced him that we should head back although we also had to convince Loopy not to cut through the market. I’m not sure why she’s always looking at the market maybe it’s a gnome thing .
We returned to the taskers guild hall around 6 where I made a new friend! I don’t know his name or really remember his face but he did say good morning to me! People don’t always do that I wonder why that is. We then walked into Elzor’s study. He had water everywhere. I deduced they were not chamber pots and rather were for some kind of ritual which Elzor backed up. He offered to teach me some divination but I’m not sure if I’ll take him up on it. I’ve never been able to grasp how wizards have so many spells. I just work with what I have.
We told Elzor the whole story (leaving out killing those guys in the sewers) and he directed us to the cult of Kalameet. Luckily I remembered a few of the Orcs on the ship worshipped Kalameet so I was able to enlighten my party members. He sent us after Ingwad (I think that was his name) but he be dead now so no bounty and no nothing. Before we left he gave me guild rates on a diamond so I can finally cast Chaotic Orb again!
After a lovely nap we set off for the slums. Well all of us but Gene who apparently was feeling sick. Maybe hes always sick and thats why he wears that scarf. Loopy and I consistently examined the wares but Partyon kept strolling along, though he did stop once to admire a lovely pretzel cart outside the church. Loopy even bought one for a fellow customer! What a kind gnome. The church was tall with very heavy doors and a stained glass window, tempted as I was to break it we all ended up wandering inside.
We were greeted by a man in a mask, well Partyon and I were. Loopy wandered off to sit between worshipers for some reason. Perhaps she secretly worships Kalameet. Masked guy made a big deal about Partyon but had no information about Ingwad despite my silver tongue. (SPOILERALERT! he was Ingwad) But before that we got in a big fight and once again it was because Partyon began speaking to someone.
I saw him go over to someone on a bench, they began whispering and all of a sudden Partyon was getting a dagger in his dragon chest. Luckily I had been inching towards my components pouch and was able to react almost instinctively. It’s also a good thing that the dreams came again last night. I am in a field the wind roars and screams around me and as it begins to die I hear whispers of power. I had the feeling it had something to do with being asleep which it turned out it literally was! Over the course of about 30 seconds I took out their entire little cult mob! I am amazing and everyone else was kind of useful as it took attention away from me.

We then began walking around knocking people out. I wanted to just kill them all but again Partyon was all “No honor in killing people who are asleep blah blah punch blah” So I had to use my spear. I hate using it, I only have it because it makes me look cool. One time I failed to knock the guy out but luckily I fire bolted his face instantly. Been a while since I’ve done that and it felt pretty good.

Once all the little brown robes were knocked out we went over to Masked guy. I made the executive decision to take his mask off but I wish I had not. He was ugly as sin. Probably a burn victim but knowing this stupid cult it was self inflicted. Partyon then decided to take advantage of being a scary fellow. He took him to the altar and started threatening him with his own dagger (it was then we found out he was Ingwad) Ingwad said something about how we were too late and the city was doomed. I wanted to take him to the guards for our reward but Partyon and Loopy wanted to see the locked room. I suggested throwing Ingwad inside which I instantly regretted but they both liked the idea so that may be a new strategy for our little group.

Partyon threw him inside and maybe disrupted a big summoning ritual. He also vaporized Ingwad so no money their but since I may shortly be dead due to the fucking skeletal Minotaur that arose that may be the least of my concerns. At least I got to cast a few spells today. I also saw Partyon shoot lightning out of his mouth again. I wonder if he can change it’s element, also do all dragonborn’s breath match their color? All these and more might be answered if I am not shortly to die.

My first party

I had been hanging around the Taskers guildhouse, looking for some marks, when this old beardy guy called out my name and ushered me inside, along with three other very large individuals. One of them was a lizard named Partyon. Another was a half elf named Raen and… something named Gene. I don’t know what Gene is cause he never took off his hood. I think the beard guys name was Enzor or Enzon or something. I tried to pick his pocket but all I found was my ring in there. It’s cool though, myself and Enzod are buddies.

He sent us to this posh house in the administration district. I wanted to go through the marketplace to see if i could steal lunch but nooOOOoo everyone wanted to go straight there. as a result, i didn’t get to eat all day, so I am starving. Maybe lizards and half elves and whatever Gene is don’t need food, but I do. I’ll have to remember to steer the party in a more food oriented direction tomorrow.

We ended up cutting straight through the administration district to get to this house. Some guy named Felix lives there. He is an appraiser with a dwarf butler. The dwarf has two hands, so no worries there, but the dwarf is also dead so now I’m really not concerned with him.

The dwarf brought us up to the attic and instructed us not to attempt to touch Felix. When we got up there, we saw Felix sitting next to a table with a red circle around him. The red circle prevented anything from getting in and out. This did not extend to sound, but judging from the dark patch on the floor Felix was trying to conceal from us it did extend to smell. Felix had fallen victim to a very literal cartoon Djinn, and he tasked us with retrieving it. I tried to throw a rock at him but it didn’t work. Then I tried to climb on Partyon’s shoulders but he threw me off. Then we set off to the sewers. I don’t know why we did that, but it has to do with a language Raen speaks. Raen’s the kind of guy that speaks 40 different languages but doesn’t know how to properly tie his shoes.

We get to a big metal disc that Partyon tosses aside with ease. I then get thrown headfirst into a river of fecal matter while Partyon gently lowers himself and the rest of the party to the ground. I am still livid about this. Raen mocked me, so I conjured the image of an ugly horse face around his face. I clearly won that particular interaction.

We walked down the smelly chasm until Gene heard some noises and spotted an orc and a trio of goblins coming at us. The Orc sounded like an old, heavily tobaccod, Jason Statham. We let Gene and Partyon do the talking. In the future, Gene and Partyon should only do the talking if the talking will be followed immediately by punching. This is exactly what transpired.

The goblins got the jump on us, dashing forward before they’d even seen me and slashing at Gene and Partyon. Partyon seemed ok but Gene took a pretty deep cut to the midsection. I tried to conjure a roar at the Orc, who still hadn’t seen me, but I failed miserably. Raen tried to blast the goblins with magic. I’m not sure if he connected, but I do know that he followed up his spell casting by scampering behind me. This is confusing, since Raen is 6 feet tall and I am four feet tall, but I imagine he had his reasons. Partyon and Gene had far more success, battering goblins into unconsciousness threw sheer size differences. The Orc dashed at Gene, but just missed with his ax. The I, the fearless hero of all stories, dove in elegant fashion past Partyon and hacked at the Orcs legs, cutting right through the tendons and leaving him crippled and useless. I wanted to interrogate him, since I was a bit confused about what he was doing there, something to do with a Rat King, but Partyon wanted to punch a cripple, and who am I to reason with a lizard’s fists.

I got a key, a sword, and some gold.

Instead of opening the heavy metal doors with the key, we took a right and found a wooden door that had music playing on the other side of it. We got in to see a giant blue creature dancing as a melody echoed from a strange metallic contraption in the corner of the room. The Blue Creature went over to the object, combed its hair, and hit it with its elbow, causing the music to stop. It turned out that this was the Genie we had been sent to find, his name is Tim. He told us he would only come if we fought his minions, but we were delayed by a strange coughing fit from Raen. Tim’s “Minions” turned out to be a bunch of chickens, which Partyon fried with Lighting Breath. Come to think of it, this would have been a good time to eat something.

We got Tim and walked back to Felix’s only to find the door ajar. We raced upstairs and saw the dwarf bloody in a corner with Felix pressed up against the circle white with fright. I am willing to bet the 4 gold i got off that orc that its vampires. Or I would be willing to bet that but i’m the only one with any money.

The adventure log is where you list the sessions and adventures your party has been on, but for now, we suggest doing a very light “story so far” post. Just give a brief overview of what the party has done up to this point. After each future session, create a new post detailing that night’s adventures.

One final tip: Don’t stress about making your Obsidian Portal campaign look perfect. Instead, just make it work for you and your group. If everyone is having fun, then you’re using Obsidian Portal exactly as it was designed, even if your adventure log isn’t always up to date or your characters don’t all have portrait pictures.