And experience has shown that the people who are willing to be frank and up front about their sexuality are the people who are practicing safer sex. The people (and I'm painting with a very broad brush) who loudly impune fornicators won't bringthemselves to buy condoms for those moments when their resolve slips.

well to be frank this is a faith based site and the focus is pleasing a higher God and not the flesh,self. so why wait was the ? and the truth of the matter is because the word of God says that no fornicators shall enter the kingdom of heaven, 1corinthians 6:9. also if you love Him you will obey His commands.

This is a site where faith is often discussed, but it's not a parochial site. Beliefnet does not belong to any one religion and does not promote any religious view. Beliefnet members may, but this is a site for many beliefs.

well to be frank this is a faith based site and the focus is pleasing a higher God and not the flesh,self.

I can understand why a Christian would adopt that stance. In my faith, though, sex is one of the ways that a person can directly encounter the Divine. It can be a profoundly spiritual experience that is more than pleasing to more than a few deities.

And this isn't new; in the anicent world sacred sex took places in temples as an act of worship. I seem to recall the apostle Paul decrying this practice somewhere in the New Testament. Such things aren't for everyone.

Personally, I find the "waiting-until-marriage" to have sex nonsensical.

Why wait? All you need is a girlfriend and the right precautions.

I understand your feelings, and had them myself from age 14 till 25, when I finally had those things, and a few others I hadn't know were necessary.

they included: Being relaxed enough with myself to be who I was

Being accepting enough of others to accept who THEY were.

Understanding that opportunity wasn't going to knock on MY door, I had to knock on it's door

And learning to listen to people well enough to know when I was being invited

Now I have no idea how old you are, but if you're anywhere less than 18, the following advice may help, (maybe even if you're older) :

"While you can't hurry the process along, you can prepare. Here's how: Worry less about getting your 15-year-old self laid, and start thinking about getting your 18- or 20-year-old self laid. Join a gym and build yourself a body that girls will find irresistible; read a lot so you'll have something to say to the girls you do attract; and get out of the house and do shit--political shit, social shit, low-stakes shit--so that you'll meet different kinds of girls in different kinds of settings and you'll get comfortable talking to them.

More assignments: Get a decent haircut and use deodorant and floss your teeth and take regular showers and wear clean clothes. Go online and learn about birth control and STDs, and learn enough about the clitoris that you'll be able to find it in the dark. "