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Definitions are in order. It’s not myself, or my own life I’ve lost faith in. It’s the relating to the greater world that’s hopeless.

All my life I’ve felt sort of off-sides from what most people are ‘present’ to, still I’ve felt very connected and a part of my society and this time in history.
It’s why I got into all the writing. Two things going on there, the one was simply my learning process in action.
But, also, since I am in a fairly isolated place, it was also my attempt at reaching out and networking, trying find some like-minded, try to do something with it.
To offer detailed descriptions of ideas I was trying to get across. I accomplished that but it never got past the act of one hand clapping.

I look at this society around me. Jezz, even after the election disaster of 2000 with its hideous consequences, so few citizens took things seriously, now the Trump Circus, and its being normalized. Then for me the dramas of Bates and Fyfe, ATTP and it’s like the bubble has burst. If the smart people on my own side are still so utterly inept and impotent and at a loss. What the hell is the point even trying anymore?

April was appropriately busy so had no time for writing anyways, but now when I’m back to having windows of opportunity I’ve simply sat around trying to relax and focus on chores around this place. Maddy loves it. My mind is still processing lots of stuff, but tending towards history and thinking about how we got here and leaving the inevitability of where we’re taking our planet as fast as humanly possible for some other time.

The world’s in a bad way, my man,
And bound to be worse before it mends;
Better lie up in the mountain here
Four or five centuries,
While the stars go over the lonely ocean.
ROBINSON JEFFERS, “The Stars Go Over the Lonely Ocean”

The world’s in a bad way, my man,
And bound to be worse before it mends;
Better lie up in the mountain here
Four or five centuries,
While the stars go over the lonely ocean.ROBINSON JEFFERS, “The Stars Go Over the Lonely Ocean”

See there is a reason we have poets.
Nice, I wasn’t familiar with him.

Yeah, that’s were my deep understanding and appreciation of evolution comes in handy, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
It’s like those fantastic flowers blooming in our gardens, for a short moment they create structure and beauty that’s hard to fathom,
a few blinks later, ‘sad’ wilted rags, then back to dust.

I’m very Earthcentric, I mourn all humanity has destroyed these past ten thousand years, yet I’m a human and am amazed at all we accomplished.

As a kid I just thought perhaps we’d learn to slow it down a little, stretch out a good thing so more generations could enjoy what we had,
but, no. We have collectively decided, peddle to the metal, our party is all that matters.
It has been one hell of a party for those fortunate enough to be a part of it.

I’ve been in an amazing place, on the one hand I’m a poor boy from a poor family, I’ve always been a Fate’s Whim away from homelessness.
But, I’ve had qualities and skills that have had me ‘serving’ rich folks in their opulent settings.
In younger days public classy restaurants, banquets, resorts and such, but also through construction within their homes and enclaves.
Its provided this snot-nosed kid exploring the alleys of Chicago quite an interesting perspective on life.
Might have something to do with why it’s so rare for folks to relate to what I write.

As long as you don’t get as deep into nihilism as Titanomachina you’ll be alright.

Perish the thought.
It’s too bad he never participates in other’s threads - I though he’d have jumped on this one,
heck he was sort of an inspiration for me starting this thread, but he never showed up.