WMD: Writer, Mother, Dreamer

Monthly Archives: June 2014

When I first started doing the TFTBN Tuesday Promptsat the beginning of May, it was hard to get to sleep on Monday nights. I was so FREAKING EXCITED! My mind would swirl with ideas about what to ask everyone. It could not be just any question. It had to be thought provoking. It had to help us all grow in our craft.

I would be giddy with the thought of being able to learn from so many different creative minds as well as learning about myself too. It would take courage and creativity, but we could all do it if we were examining our process together.

We would be BIGGER, stronger, faster…
but without all the bionics
and government funding and junk…BUT WE WOULD STILL BE BETTER TOGETHER!

(Insert creative superhero theme music and words like “triumphant crescendo”…)

Tossing and turning, flipping and flopping, I sorted through the ideas in my mind.

(Toss) “What are we working on? What is our magnum opus? What is our small project? What is our life’s work?”

(Turn) “Where are we ‘staying’ stuck? How do we get in our own way? How do we trip ourselves up?”

(Flip) “Who are we ACTUALLY talking to? When we begin to create, who are we thinking about? Whose story are we trying to tell?”

(Flop) “When did we fall in love with what we do? What was that feeling? Can we recapture it at will to help us create?”

But wait… there’s more!

On Wednesday, I would create the TFTBN Wednesday Discussion so you would have the video “back story” on what I was thinking about when I created the prompt. It was more than just the prompt reworded. I was expounding on the intention behind it. It was, “You know the prompt. Now, here’s what I think it will help us to uncover.”

But wait… there’s STILL more!

And if all that was not enough, then I would get to do what I adore, TFTBN Thursday Post. On that day, I could be a “plain old writer” doing “plain old writer” type things. I could answer the questions I had posted to the group as a student of my craft not as a moderator to our creative process. It did not matter that I as a grown up I never got an invisible jet like Wonder Woman. I got to WRITE!! THAT was my super power.

(Cue the aforementioned theme music and accompanying crescendo of triumph…)

And that ain’t all!

Then you would reply with your blog posts, and your vlog videos, and your comments. You would read my work. I would read yours. Other people would read. In our own little virtual commune, we would support each other, critique each other, learn from each other, grow with each other, teach the world to sing in perfect harmony. EVERYONE from all over the world, all races, all religions, all cultures, and all creeds would “collaborate” with me and with each other.

It was great!
It was Amazing!
It was AWESOME!
Until… it wasn’t.

(Insert “The Lonely Man” theme from the Incredible Hulk TV show.)

My ideas to engage people started to dry up. It was like trying to ring the last bit of water out of a washcloth. I started having creative tantrums and some very uncreative ones too! Less and less people started to view and participate. What had felt like “marketing and promoting” started to feel like “begging and pleading”.

The joy I had in the beginning dried up like a raisin in the sun.

Or worse…

it melted like your favorite Popsicle
that time it fell off the stick onto the sidewalk
after you begged your Mom to get it for you
and she didn’t want to buy it
because you didn’t have dinner yet
but it was 90 degrees
so you whined and she caved
and she gave you the last dollar in her purse
(a purse as big as a garbage bag with only 1 dollar. smh.)
and you got the red, white, and blue pop
and it was gonna taste good
and the second you licked it
I mean REALLY licked it
DAMMMNNNNNNN!!!
it fell on the ground
except in this metaphor
you are like 6 years old
so you can’t say “damn!”
even though you feel “damn!”
in your poor little Popsicle-less soul!

And that is where I am on this Tuesday. Looking at my popsicle of inspiration on the ground melting. Trying not to throw a creative tantrum with the word “DAMMMMNNNN,” bellowing in my mind. I want to do this if it is engaging and stimulating and fun. If it’s not then it’s a chore and I have a butt load of those already.

Now here is the dilemma I experienced… who would I talk to about what I was feeling? The “Non-Creatives” don’t really get what happens in the mind during a creative process.

All of the “Creatives” I admired have at one time or another participated and I didn’t want to get in the icky space of making them feeling obligated to participate just because they had answered a question about how to engage people. And the WHOLE quandary just made first me tired in my mind, body, and spirit.

So… when to going gets tough… the tough GO FISHING!

Not literally, of course. The live bait and fish I can handle. The bugs, not so much. So I am taking this week off and I will see on Tuesday of next week if the creative juices are flowing or if the draught remains.

Unfortunately, we didn’t really collect a set of names of stuff we should all go check out, as I had hoped, but I did receive wonderful feedback from Gretchen Kelly, Melissa of Lots About Stuff, and Matt b.k.a. Matt BrownieCake a.k.a. MBC. You can see their comments attached to the Thursday post, or you can take a look at what they do and what I admire by clicking the links below.

My Fav V/Blogs:

“Emilyism – Recovery Discover” – Emily and I have a lot in common. She is a blogger, a woman, a mother, and a recovering alcoholic. She shares her hope, strength, and experience one day at a time.

“Lots About Stuff” – Melissa is not just funny. She is FUNNY AS HELL! No. Seriously. I mean like, “make your Starbucks shoot out of your nose as you snort laugh” funny.

“Rugged Tribe Entertainment” – James keeps me going back to his channel because he always shares how he creates his shot, the equipment he uses, and tips on how you can do it too. Oh… and he has a dimple that is so awesome it is like a super power. BAM!

Matt BrownieCake – MBC is amazing to me. He pushes the envelope on his channel by not doing what most of us do, picking one tiny little niche and staying only within the realm of it. When you watch you never know what you will discover.

PenPaperPad.com – Tamara’s writing style makes me hang onto her words because she is doing what I want to do. I also share her splendid “I am secure in my differentnessness” attitude.

Drifting Through My Open Mind – Blogger Gretchen Kelly talks about the tough stuff, the knot in your throat stuff, the “let’s take a look at the truth so we can change the reality of the stuff” stuff. I admire her style and her courage.

The TFTBN Tuesday Promptwas a little tongue in cheek this week. It was inspired by an entry for “blog crush” in Urban Dictionary. I hope you know I wasn’t insinuating that you are carving someone’s initials in your notebook during 5th period math class based on reading a post or watching a video.

As I said in the TFTBN Wednesday Discussion, I really wanted to know who you follow. What do they do that makes you keep coming back for more? What sets them apart and what can we learn from them?

I’m “polyblogamourous” so I have a list! (Ting! Ting! Ting! Ting! Bonus points are being awarded for making up a really long word and using it in a sentence. No sexy intended, but Urban Dictionary here I come.) 🙂

Here are 3 of my favs in no particular order and why I HEART them. Plus, I am doing an honorable mention blurb too!

“Emilyism – Recovery Discover”
Even before the words, “Hi. My name is Dee and I’m an alcoholic,” became a normal way of introducing myself, I saw Emily on the Dr. Phil show. It was in 2010 when, sure, maybe I drank a lot but you would too if you had my life. I was so deep in denial that I believed I was okay, but still, I could not ignore something about this woman. I told myself it was because she was a mom and a writer and embarking on creating a new life. I understand now that I saw myself in her and her blog gave me hope that life – ups and downs and all – was best spent outside of a bottle. Thank you, Emily, for sharing your strength, experience, and hope with me.

“Lots About Stuff”
Immediately after I signed up for the SSSVEDA 2014 challenge, I got a notification on Twitter. Someone with the handle @lotsaboutstuff had put me into some list for SSSVEDA participants. Didn’t know what it meant. Didn’t know how I felt about it. “Stranger Danger?” Paranoid, perhaps but I was the new kid in class. She explained that it was a way for us all to keep in touch during the challenge, but I did not think much of it. That is, until the first time I had a question. There she was consistently providing answers, suggestions, and helping me grow. And did then I checked out her YouTube channel to find out, she is FUNNY AS HELL! No. Seriously. I mean like, “make your Starbucks shoot out of your nose as you snort laugh” funny. Her humor is intellectual without being exclusionary. I watch to laugh and learn.

“Rugged Tribe Entertainment”
It’s not that this is the YouTube channel for the man who suggested I start vlogging in the first place… It’s not that we are working on a short film project called See Me with an amazing musical composer named JP from Just Play Music Group. It’s not even that every single video he produces has the most amazing quality that it looks as if he is always shooting a high budget movie. What keeps me going back to James’ channel is that he always shares how he creates his shot, the equipment he uses, and tips on how you can do it too. Sometimes he speaks “video-inese” but that’s when I ping him and ask him to break it down to “Dee-speak.” Oh… and he has a dimple that is so awesome it is like a super power. BAM! Saved the day.

Oh.. and these 3 too… also

Matt BrownieCake– MBC is amazing to me. First, he is constantly producing new content. Like… I wonder if he sleeps at all. He pushes the envelope on his channel by not doing what most of us do, picking one tiny little niche and staying only within the realm of it. He moves between very deep and thought provoking videos to the dual personality “smart aleck”. When you watch you never know what you will discover.

PenPaperPad.com – This is the blog of author Tamara Woods. We met during the SSSVEDA 2014 challenge. She has graciously taken me into her tribe of writers during her TweetChat #writestuff every Tuesday night at 9PM ET. Not only do I hang onto her words because she is doing what I want to do, but also she and I share a sort of splendid “I am secure in my differentnessness” attitude.

Drifting Through My Open Mind – Bonus points are being awarded to Blogger Gretchen Kelly for the blog name alone. Even the title makes you want to visit and read a post or two or twenty. I like her work because she talks about the tough stuff, the knot in your throat stuff, the “let’s take a look at the truth so we can change the reality of the stuff” stuff. I admire her style and her courage.

Oh… and…

I want to mention more but I am not always sure of the schedule they use to publish content or they have not published in a really long time so I do not want to send you all to a blog that has been put out to pasture. I’m not ashamed to say I still visit them waiting for the new content to arrive the way you wait for the cute boy to call even though he only asked you for your phone number 15 minutes ago. Stop judging that statement and upload some content, doggoneit!

So now, it’s your turn! Who is your v/blog crush? Who do you love and why? (Again… not the restraining order don’t be creepy love but who can count on you as a fan?)

TFTBN Tuesday Prompt: What is your FAVORITEST vlog or blog? Why do you love it? Who creates it? What do they do? What do you get from it? Do you watch to learn or just to enjoy? Does their work influence what you produce? If you could add one thing to their content, what would it be? Who is your v/blog crush? C’mon. Spill the beans!

It’s late. You don’t need to look at the time because the two burning embers that have replaced your eyeballs are screaming that it is LATE:THIRTY! You should have been in bed hours ago. This is gonna hurt tomorrow.

But you can’t quit now! You’re working. And you have a deadline (real or imagined). You are being “productive” and have 17,462 browser tabs open to prove it. So there.

You are primed and ready. You are just about to get down to business. This is gonna be good. You can almost taste it. This is going to be your best work yet!

But first…

What harm will it do to take a little stroll over the InterWebs to see what’s new on “THEIR” v/blog?

Listen. I’m not judging. It’s not your fault. They are the Venus Fly Trap of v/bloggers. When you discovered their site, you went on an all out binge. You even felt the sweet sinking sorrow at the reaching the end of available content.

When are they posting something else? (sniffle, sniffle)

Viewing their v/blog makes you smarter, cooler, a better v/blogger, and an overall better human being. So you promise yourself, “Just one and then I will get to work.”

That – My Friend – is a “V/Blog Crush”. Actually, it is probably more honest to say you have a “content crush.” You know nothing about the person, may not even know what they look like or where they live, yet you know without a shadow of a doubt – THEIR BRAIN ROCKS!!!

That’s what we are talking about this week.

TFTBN Tuesday Prompt: What is your FAVORITEST vlog or blog? Why do you love it? Who creates it? What do they do? What do you get from it? Do you watch to learn or just to enjoy? Does their work influence what you produce? If you could add one thing to their content, what would it be? Who is your v/blog crush? C’mon. Spill the beans!