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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Day 137 of 365

Today is my birthday.

I don't like birthdays. Actually, it's my own birthday I don't like. I like celebrating other peoples birthdays, just not my own.

Some years it's because I don't like getting older. Some years it's because I think about what I haven't done in life. Some years it's because in the middle of summer it is usually too hot to do anything. Some years it's because I've wasted my summer away. And some years it's because of something stupid, childish, and petty.

Presents.

Every year for my daughter and my husband's birthdays, Father's Day, and Christmas, I go big. I make sure everyone has everything they would ever need and then some. I want celebration days to be days where they feel special. I look for things they might want or need months ahead and hold onto them until the special day.

But it doesn't work that way for presents for me. They usually buy gifts last minute (although that's not the biggest complaint). The biggest issue is they won't buy me anything unless it's on a list. If it's on a list, I'll probably get it. If it's not on a list, forget about it. Last year I asked for some potholders, gift cards to the places I like to bargain shop (like Target) and a DVD of The Office TV show. Unfortunately I had also mentioned when we were repainting our porch last summer that it would be easier to smooth out the rough spots if we had an electric sander.

So for my birthday last year I got 7 potholders, all the same, all in separate bags, and a electric sander. The sander is still in the box, never used. I eventually went and bought my own DVD off of ebay.

Christmas is the same way. I won't get anything if it's not on a list. When we open gifts, we take turns. Daughter, husband, me. Daughter, husband, me. For the last 25+ years, I have been the one sitting watching everyone else open gift after gift after gift (since I run out of presents after about number six).

At some point I'll get smart and start making a bigger list. But I like the idea of being surprised on a birthday or Christmas. I like the idea of buying things that surprise others. If everyone only got what was on a list, where is the fun in that?

But this year I'm not worrying about getting older. This year I'm not worried about what I haven't done in life. This year it is hot, but not too hot. This year I know I haven't wasted my summer away. And this year I'm not caring so much about presents.

There won't even be presents today anyway. Our daughter is working all day today so we won't be "officially" celebrating today - that will come later this week.

We are having a cake today, though. A cake my husband baked and decorated. I guided him through as he made the cake and the homemade buttercream frosting. I taught him how to color the frosting and some basic cake decorating techniques. I clipped some of our rose buds from the garden for the center.

He's quite proud of his work. As am I. Don't think I could have done a better job myself.

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