7 Secrets to Career Success

All of these suggestions will help you meet new people. And the laws of probability ensure that the more new people you know in the circles in which you want to work and play, the more great opportunities will come your way and the more help you’ll get at critical junctures in your career.

Forget Desperate Networking

It’s time you forget the images we all have in our heads of the desperate, out-of-work individuals scooping up every business card in sight while fervently mingling at business conventions and job-hunting events. The great myth of networking is that you start reaching out to others only when you need something – like a job. In reality, people who have the largest circle of contacts, mentors and friends know that you must reach out to others long before you need anything at all.

Success Secret #5: Don’t Be a Networking Jerk

When I give talks to students in college and grad school, they always ask me: What are the secrets to success? What are the unspoken rules for making it big? “So you want the inside scoop,” I respond. “Fair enough. I’ll sum up the key to success in one word: Generosity.”

They are shocked, because they thought I’d help them learn the manipulative tricks of the self-centered “networker,” the schmooze artist holding a martini with one hand and scattering business cards with the other, eyes darting around the room in a constant search for a bigger fish to fry. But the time of that insincere, overly ambitious, glad-handing Networking Jerk is over! Then again, it probably never started.

To build a powerful web of genuine, mutually beneficial relationships, you must truly care about making others successful. You have to give your talents, give your contacts, and give your hard work to help others get what they want – without keeping score.

The Story of a Relationship Hoarder

Here’s a story about one person I encountered who didn’t understand this at all. When I worked for Deloitte Consulting, there was a period when I was frequently traveling to Los Angeles. I had always been intrigued by the entertainment industry, so in the interest of building it before I needed it, I called Ray Gallo, my best friend from my undergraduate days, who was practicing law in Los Angeles.