Here you will find the entire collection of cartoons by
Malcolm, Matt and Neel. Periodically, those lazy prats do
what I pay them for and produce another one. ...like "word
to the bird." Ugh. You'll see what I mean. But some
are terrific. Upon our masterpieces we have bestowed our
highest honor, the RED FONT.

Most of the animations are in *.gif format, which all browsers
can view. A couple, however, are in flash format. If you
do not have flash player installed, hit up the macromedia
website and download it for free.

Scroll to the bottom of the page for some info on Malcolm,
Matt and Neel.

Hellicopter - This is
Malcolm's latest cartoon, about a murderous helicopter pilot.
It's pretty crazy. Get ready for more of his pretentious
cinephile references. Oh, btw, that's a cloud at the end,
not a cupcake.

Elevator - This is based
on an analogy Matt's religion professor gave regarding abortion:
If you were stuck in an elevator, with an ever-expanding
fat man with a gland problem, would you kill him? It's an
important question. Think about it, my fiends.

Seven Zomburai -
A cartoon that Neel made for his friend's production company,
Seven Zomburai Productions. They're samurai, but also zombies.
Enjoy, mis amigos.

Balloon
Dog - Why a dog? Why a DOG that wreaks havoc
on a city, I ask? David, this is trouble. See me in my office.

Monster - Our
first cartoon from David, our newest staff member. In this
cartoon, a big monster hand wreaks havoc on a poor country
preacher who has lost his faith after living in a house
with two kids and joaquin phoenix. And yes, that really
IS Charlize Theron under all that stick figure make-up.

Smiley Man Death Theatre
- We don't know who made these. But you can't seem to find
them anywhere anymore, so until we hear a complaint, we'll
host them here! This is the complete collection, minus whatever
number 9 was. Enjoy!

Malcolm
and Matt's Cartoon - Matt and Malcolm made a
cartoon together. Will it be THE LAST GIF? Only time will
tell. In the meantime, enjoy, as it's a visual feast. Plus
Charlotte, NC gets wrecked, and you get to see that. Presented
in 2 parts.

Flash cartoons:

Hellicopter - This is
Malcolm's latest cartoon, about a murderous helicopter pilot.
It's pretty crazy. Get ready for more of his pretentious
cinephile references. Oh, btw, that's a cloud at the end,
not a cupcake.

Death
Song - Malcolm's magnum opus. It's all in flash.
It's about a dude walking down the street, and the adventures
he has, before his Untimely Death.

Stabby - Matt's first solo
flash. It lacks ghosts and frogs, but I've seen worse. Word
to the bird, mes amis.

Clash
of the 60's Icon Titans - The second flash animation.
JFK and Sean Connery have it out over Kennedy's refusal
to wear a hat in public. Malcolm spent so much time on the
voices he didn't bother to make them move until the big
fight.

Word to the Bird - The first
flash animation. Malcolm and Matt collaborated on this one.
They wish to express their gratitude to Matt's awesome girlfriend
for putting up with their working on this for a couple of
hours. The time was clearly well-spent. (Did I mention I'm
wearing my sarcasm socks?)

SunFrogGhostBird
- (The zeroeth flash animation. Malcolm made this to prove
to himself that he could make a flash animation. He succeeded
with flying colors, in the sense that flying colors is all
this piece of crap really amounts to.)

The "Inspired By Stick Figure Death Theatre"
collection, in its entirety. Presented chronomologically.

From The Archives - The
first gif animation Malcolm made. It's godawful. In fact,
I've only posted it to inspire him to produce something
good for once.

Louis Souris - A charming
character from Malcolm's fifth-grade french book. It always
made sense somehow that he would kill and maim, especially
the teacher in the book, Madame Claire-Voyant. Note the
lightsaber... Yeah, your guess is as good as mine.

Malcolm's Untimely Death
- Matt's first cartoon. It ends with his delightful tagline,
"I'm the devil!" This inspired lots of hate mail
in the early days.

The Ill-Fated
Skater - Neel's first cartoon. Neel admits the
animation is not the best, but the art direction is sublime.

Head Lid - For a time, fortunecity.com,
their free host, set them up with a dot com address, and
they selected HeadLid.com. Well, the name comes from this
cartoon! Another early Malcolm effort.

The Bullet - For whatever
reason, this cartoon also attracted controversy. Someone
cited it on a webpage as a "worst of the web"
example. Malcolm thought this was awesome.

Matt's Untimely Death
- Malcolm's revenge for his death. Note that Matt is playing
his guitar upside down. That wasn't a sly joke; Malcolm
was just that clueless about the guitar.

The Eye - Another "I'm
the devil" cartoon by Matt. A guy takes a big chomp
out of another guy. You must understand, Matt had lots of
ambition, but very little time, and often gave up in frustration.
Yet even in this early work, you can see the twisted genius
waiting to spring out.

The Comet - Neel's second
animation. A comet comes to earth. What will it bring? You'll
have to watch to find out.

Le Bonhomme
de Neige - The true story of the mascot of the
Quebec Winter Carnival who, on odd years, kills patrons
of the carnival in a murderous rampage.

Homage To Matt Calvert
- Their site was named Inspired by Stick Figure Death Theatre,
paying homage, of course, to Stick Figure Death Theatre,
founded by Matt Calvert, which is still to be found at sfdt.com.
Malcolm, ever the suckup, made this cartoon in honor of
the man who gave him something to do with his ever-dwindling
free time. It is in the style of Matt Calvert's original
sfdt cartoons, and incorporates the murder weapons of his
first four animations.

Matt's Disclaimer - After
a teacher (somehow) saw the website, Matt felt the need
to set the record straight. Oddly, this one of Malcolm's
favorites.

The Dangers of Cold Season
- Malcolm made this one because he was sick of this one
dude on dorm doing these phelgmy snorts every six seconds.
He was an all-right guy, just a pain to be around from during
allergy season, cold season, and springtime allergy season.
You know, like aural bad breath.

The Mirror
- Malcolm made this one because he thought incorporating
a mirror image into one of his animations would be fun.
So he did, and this is how it turned out.

Slowly But Surely - Malcolm
was showing his friend Ed how to make gif animations. This
is for reference only. See the contributors section below
for Ed's cartoon, Blind Date.

Spot's Day
Out - Neel's opus. Spot is based on a campus
dog who needed to be satirized in a big way.

The Real
Adventures of Lewis and Clark - Malcolm's opus,
adapted (word for boring word) from Undaunted Courage, by
Stephen Ambrose. Neel was actually working on a Lewis and
Clark cartoon when his computer froze. So Malcolm stepped
up to the plate and saved the day.

Something's Killing Me! - Malcolm
made this cartoon, and evidently in a hurry. It's based
on something Matt used to say. He also used to go, "Agh!
My groin!" But this translated better to fiction.

Full o' Lead - A cartoon
Matt just unearthed. Contains his now-copyrighted catchphrase,
of course.

A Dog With HUMAN HANDS! What
could be worse? - This is a cartoon about me. By Malcolm.
See if you can guess who gets to fetch my coffee every morning.
It is kind of amusing though... I like the part where I
kill the guy.

SunFrogGhostBird
- This awful thing. There's not even a plot. Just dancing
and carnage. Malcolm made this in a hurry to explore the
many uses of flash. See the top of the page if you have
trouble viewing it.

Word to the Bird - Another
flash animation. This was created by Matt and Malcolm. Malcolm
is the large man who wants giblets or whatever, and Matt
is the onion-headed guy. The shotgun noise, fyi, is a stapler.

Clash
of the 60's Icon Titans - The second flash animation.
JFK and Sean Connery have it out over Kennedy's refusal
to wear a hat in public. Malcolm spent so much time on the
voices he didn't bother to make them move until the big
fight.

Sword Fight - Matt's
cartoon about two guys fighting. Heh heh. The race of man
has such simple tastes.

Meet
Deathfox - A sterling effort by Matt. One of
his best. This thing is just plain terrifying. Deathfox,
considered by some leading scientists to be the missing
link between the animal world and me, is not only a hard-wired
killing machine but skilled in math. Watch out.

BabyKill
- Lies, lies, lies. Matt is on thin ice. I've never done
anything remotely like this, attacking an infant. Matt believes
this will be his last gif animation, excluding the Matt
and Malcolm joint-effort that will be coming out soon. I
hope not... but hey, the future is here.

Stabby - Matt's first solo
flash. It lacks ghosts and frogs, but I've seen worse. Word
to the bird, mes amis.

Death
Song - A cartoon by Malcolm. The odyssey of one
man walking down the street, and the adventures he has before
his Untimely Death.

Malcolm
and Matt's Cartoon - Matt and Malcolm made a
cartoon together. Will it be THE LAST GIF? Only time will
tell. In the meantime, enjoy, as it's a visual feast. Plus
Charlotte, NC gets wrecked, and you get to see that. Presented
in 2 parts.

Seven Zomburai -
A cartoon that Neel made for his friend's production company,
Seven Zomburai Productions. They're samurai, but also zombies.
Enjoy, mis amigos.

Elevator - This is based
on an analogy Matt's religion professor gave regarding abortion:
If you were stuck in an elevator, with an ever-expanding
fat man with a gland problem, would you kill him? It's an
important question. Think about it, my fiends.

Hellicopter - This is
Malcolm's latest cartoon, about a murderous helicopter pilot.
It's pretty crazy. Get ready for more of his pretentious
cinephile references. Oh, btw, that's a cloud at the end,
not a cupcake.

Cartoons from our staff

Balloon
Dog - Why a dog? Why a DOG that wreaks havoc
on a city, I ask? David, this is trouble. See me in my office.

Monster - Our
first cartoon from David, our newest staff member. In this
cartoon, a big monster hand wreaks havoc on a poor country
preacher who has lost his faith after living in a house
with two kids and joaquin phoenix. And yes, that really
IS Charlize Theron under all that stick figure make-up.

6 Short Films by
Andrew - An Andrew collection for you. These are six
short animations of his. They're delightful. My favorite
is the one where that guy dies.

Smiley Man Death Theatre
- We don't know who made these. But you can't seem to find
them anywhere anymore, so until we hear a complaint, we'll
host them here! This is the complete collection, minus whatever
number 9 was. Enjoy!

Malcolm cranked out a little copy about the creative team.
Check it out:

Meet Our Creative Team!

I can't decide if Matt looks like the coolest guy in town
or just an idiot. That's the problem with a getup like that.
But I'm leaning towards the former.

Malcolm writes and does cartoons. He's back home in the
South now, after two years in the frozen tundra that is
the midwest. And yes, Paul Simon was right, the moustache
was a bad idea.

Neel... this is your picture until you send us a better
one.

Featured Contributors

Stevie writes for us. At any given time he will reliably
be juggling about three different women to feel big. It
is unclear whom he hates.

Andrew is Matt's brother. We're showcasing his work from
a few years ago, just uncovered on Matt's and his old computer.
I'm told Andrew has mind powers. Either that or the flash
went off when he was taking a picture in the mirror.

David is one of our animators. Here you see him devouring
something. You'd think it's a nectarine, but you'd be wrong.
It's a HUMAN HEAD.

Send these guys email using the submission form, found
on the advice page.