$2USD or more

Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

"The Comedy Album" is the 13th and most epic Kleenex Girl Wonder record. 26 songs, covering a variety of genres, styles, and production methods, written and recorded over the course of two years, and now available on two slabs of strikingly coloured vinyl (some 'Comedy Blue,' some 'Bazooka Joke Pink'). Featuring guest production from Max Tundra, Saskrotch, and The Hood Internet, plus the usual suspects of Graham Smith, Matt LeMay and Thayer McClanahan.
Includes unlimited streaming of The Comedy Album
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

$126.09 USDor more(35% OFF)

lyrics

Could it be?
A break in the gloom?
A frame for the bruise you left
or the wounds you cleft
with your shoes
under the pretense of taking steps to improve?
So I'll believe it when you make the 10 o'clock news.
I'm only messing with you,
but all the same if you find
my societal impact
isn't aligned
with all this violent syntax,
you can decline to describe
what exactly it is
and we can wrap up this chat
and get back to the grid.
But remind me:

where oh where does the time go?
Why does it matter at all given I'm so
creepy and battered?
I need you to grab those
sepia-toned photographs of the past,
or maybe read me a bad poem,
or just rub my back.
Stroke my thigh like I'm a regular guy,
just some asshole
who couldn't change your life if he tried.
Look, I've got nothing to hide –
did you have something in mind?

It shouldn't take all night
to capture the gist in a joke,
cram your things in a bag and
drift onto the road.
You can get a studio below the Domino's
or you could maybe immolate yourself in Cicero.
At a US Maple show –
no, Alkaline Trio –
you could never take a joke.
I don't even wanna know.
When the pentothal flows,
I bet you're out of control.
Listen, I think you're dope
but I'm a thousand years old.

I could be;
could I be so bold:
how are we?
How am I solo?
Comedy is not a microscope,
and I don't wanna seem like such a misanthrope,
but get off of me!

It doesn't take all kinds
of minds to unpack this
exercise in excrescence;
you'll be fine with a mime
and a stand-up comedian.
Listen, I think you're nice,
and I'm a stand up guy.
So come on,
hands up if you wanna take a chance on a lie.
Honey, I think you're WILD,
and I'm a stand-up comedian.