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Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

GENTLEMEN, I THINK OF THE FUTURE.

Broken Record

It's a motherfucking massacre.

That is to say, Dave had just made a killing on the LOHAC stock market. The trick was to invest in tar and have his stable time copies spread false rumors about an impending shale crisis. Bloody brilliant.

He briefed the finer details of the next step which has already happened to his last remaining clone and urged him to timewarp already. Dave was expecting a visitor soon, and he'd rather not partake in the same conversation more than once. Not like that could happen, though. He didn't remember anything like it.

Just as Past Dave disappeared into his time portal, the now one-and-only Current Dave noticed a flash above his house. Right on time. He couldn't wait to flaunt his newly garnered riches, his sweet loot, his midnight crew suit. Shame Davesprite wasn't there, that would've made for a sick double-schooling. Dave hastily scurried over to a column and leaned on it.

A few seconds later, John landed before him amidst the lava, donning his dorky rocket pack. Can you believe this guy? Seriously.

"Don't look all down like that! I know you're having an un-ironic crisis ri-" "Dave." "Look, all I'm saying is maybe you should lighten u-" "DAVE."

The Knight stopped.

"Your bro is dead."

For a moment, the boiling liquid seemed to quiet down. The crocodiles' nakking felt muted. Dave's senses shut down momentarily as he tried to grasp the concept. He failed. Bro had been more than a brother. He had been Dave's pillar of strength, so to speak, made him feel like he had a purpose in life. And now, gone? Dave couldn't wrap his head around it.

Soon enough, his sense of reason returned and reassured him that he didn't have to. After all, this was just complete bullshit. Bro doesn't die. It's just one of Egbert's stupid pranks. Except this one wasn't stupid. Whew, he really had him for a second there. Dave had given him too little credit. "But if you ever do somethin like this again I'm gonna-" "Dave."

John wished he didn't have to do this. With a sigh, he deployed a katana from his sylladex. Dave ogled the finely crafted blade, desperation hidden behind his shades. He couldn't construct a viable explanation as to the bloodied sword being presented to him. Bro is dead.

A sinking feeling overcame him. Long repressed memories of beach excursions and spoon-feed battles rose up again. It was his brother who'd died; why did Dave suddenly feel like an orphan? But shit, he didn't need to think about that at all right now. This was the part where he'd take his fallen brother's blade and swear vengeance as he burned with resolve.

He failed to burn with resolve. Instead, a sob escaped him, which he quickly surpressed. Not in front of Egbert. "W-what about Davesprite?"

John paused. He'd captchalogued the amulet as well.

"No, okay, I get it. It's cool." A tear ran down his cheek. "Shit."

"Dave..." John closed in, restocking the sword. Dave pushed him away.

"You don't get it, Egbert! You can sob as much as you like for all I care, but me, I got a role to uphold here. There's no time for...for..." Sparring sprees. Jam sessions. Rap battles. All the TV dinners he ate alone. The brother he never knew and the father he hadn't known he had. All the questions he never asked.

Dave raised a palm to his forehead and clutched a strand of hair. John pulled him into a hug. Dave lost all touch with irony and started crying into his shoulder. The protective bubble that his clothes, speech and mannerisms had provided melted away, leaving only a boy who had just lost his paradox father.

"It's okay. You deserve this." Damn you, Egbert.

Maybe this is too theatrical? Keep in mind that I consider you sadness my success =P

God I can't stay mad at Noir.
He's just.
He's like when a tiny puppy murders a squirrel and brings the corpse into your house as a present to you and it's wagging its tail and is SO PROUD of itself.
Then it goes into your house, tears your couch apart, and shits on all of your carpets.

God I can't stay mad at Noir.
He's just.
He's like when a tiny puppy murders a squirrel and brings the corpse into your house as a present to you and it's wagging its tail and is SO PROUD of itself.
Then it goes into your house, tears your couch apart, and shits on all of your carpets.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Originally Posted by egregiousBass

GENTLEMEN, I THINK OF THE FUTURE.

Broken Record

It's a motherfucking massacre.

That is to say, Dave had just made a killing on the LOHAC stock market. The trick was to invest in tar and have his stable time copies spread false rumors about an impending shale crisis. Bloody brilliant.

He briefed the finer details of the next step which has already happened to his last remaining clone and urged him to timewarp already. Dave was expecting a visitor soon, and he'd rather not partake in the same conversation more than once. Not like that could happen, though. He didn't remember anything like it.

Just as Past Dave disappeared into his time portal, the now one-and-only Current Dave noticed a flash above his house. Right on time. He couldn't wait to flaunt his newly garnered riches, his sweet loot, his midnight crew suit. Shame Davesprite wasn't there, that would've made for a sick double-schooling. Dave hastily scurried over to a column and leaned on it.

A few seconds later, John landed before him amidst the lava, donning his dorky rocket pack. Can you believe this guy? Seriously.

"Don't look all down like that! I know you're having an un-ironic crisis ri-" "Dave." "Look, all I'm saying is maybe you should lighten u-" "DAVE."

The Knight stopped.

"Your bro is dead."

For a moment, the boiling liquid seemed to quiet down. The crocodiles' nakking felt muted. Dave's senses shut down momentarily as he tried to grasp the concept. He failed. Bro had been more than a brother. He had been Dave's pillar of strength, so to speak, made him feel like he had a purpose in life. And now, gone? Dave couldn't wrap his head around it.

Soon enough, his sense of reason returned and reassured him that he didn't have to. After all, this was just complete bullshit. Bro doesn't die. It's just one of Egbert's stupid pranks. Except this one wasn't stupid. Whew, he really had him for a second there. Dave had given him too little credit. "But if you ever do somethin like this again I'm gonna-" "Dave."

John wished he didn't have to do this. With a sigh, he deployed a katana from his sylladex. Dave ogled the finely crafted blade, desperation hidden behind his shades. He couldn't construct a viable explanation as to the bloodied sword being presented to him. Bro is dead.

A sinking feeling overcame him. Long repressed memories of beach excursions and spoon-feed battles rose up again. It was his brother who'd died; why did Dave suddenly feel like an orphan? But shit, he didn't need to think about that at all right now. This was the part where he'd take his fallen brother's blade and swear vengeance as he burned with resolve.

He failed to burn with resolve. Instead, a sob escaped him, which he quickly surpressed. Not in front of Egbert. "W-what about Davesprite?"

John paused. He'd captchalogued the amulet as well.

"No, okay, I get it. It's cool." A tear ran down his cheek. "Shit."

"Dave..." John closed in, restocking the sword. Dave pushed him away.

"You don't get it, Egbert! You can sob as much as you like for all I care, but me, I got a role to uphold here. There's no time for...for..." Sparring sprees. Jam sessions. Rap battles. All the TV dinners he ate alone. The brother he never knew and the father he hadn't known he had. All the questions he never asked.

Dave raised a palm to his forehead and clutched a strand of hair. John pulled him into a hug. Dave lost all touch with irony and started crying into his shoulder. The protective bubble that his clothes, speech and mannerisms had provided melted away, leaving only a boy who had just lost his paradox father.

"It's okay. You deserve this." Damn you, Egbert.

Maybe this is too theatrical? Keep in mind that I consider you sadness my success =P

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

I've had the awful impression that it's not just the 'Main Dave' (x3 loop) who hears about Bro's death.
Every time he goes through the day he gets the news and gets to it the first, second and third time.
The first time he hears about Bro's death, it's disbelief at first then gets confirmation later on. As he's getting ready to loop back he realizes he will have to relive this moment. Again and again.
The second time he starts crying as John comes up to deliver the news, he's a neurotic mess throughout the day and can barely make himself go back for the third loop.
The third time he's just numb because he's burned out from receiving the news three times and watching himself break down two times before hand.
It gives me an impression that this is the reason he only looped three times and didn't do anymore. He just couldn't take it anymore.

I was gonna write a fic about this idea, but after reading eB's there's too much sad today for it.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

The Game of Life

White.

That's the first thing Dave thinks of when he opens his eyes. His breathing is ragged, and his hand flies to his chest as if there's a sword plunged in to it. His eyes widen, just a bit, behind his Ben Stiller shades.

There isn't a sword.

He looks down, and confirms it with his eyes. No amulet, no wings, no orange anything.

He's no longer Davesprite. Dave looks behind him, and sees the last traces of orange creamsicle feathers vanishing in thin air. This -

It all comes back to him in a flash. Jack. Bro. The sword fight. Everything should have gone right, they were going to win.

And then it all went straight to shit. Jade must have prototyped that fucking devilbeast of hers, because Noir grew longer ears, a snout, the works - and then came the lightning.

He was trapped in his own thoughts, worried about what had happened to Bro when he heard it.

"Dave!"

No. That couldn't be - John was in the Land of Wind and Shade, wearing the spiderbitch's outfit.

He couldn't be here, in this blank white room, wearing the Wise Guy Suit. It just couldn't be possible.

Then John swept him up in a bear hug, and the doubt was squeezed out of his mind like his breath from his lungs.

John smiled gently, letting Dave drop. The hug was looser, but still present. "What, did you think something like that would stop me? I am the pranking master, Dave. Nothing can beat me!" He interrupted Dave before he could say anything. "Before you ask, yes. This is real. I'm here, and so's Jade, and - "

Dave immediately stepped out of John's hug, as Jade rose from the table she was seated at. The Game of LIFE was spread out on the table, with four pieces set up. The Witch ran to the Knight, and they hugged. "Dave! Oh my God I can't believe you're finally here! It's been so long, it's been months - "

"I - you - the meteors, you - where are we - " Dave's solid barrier of cool, the wall behind which he'd hid for so long, was cracking even further than it had when his friends had died in the first place. "Neither of you can be here!"

Jade continued to smile, still in her old dress. "Don't you worry about that, Jade. I'm fine, John's fine, and you're fine. Everything's great! Now sit down, we're playing LIFE!" She took her own advice then, and sat in the chair closest to the green piece. Dave looked down at the board.

Blue, green, red and... He frowned. Not purple. The fourth piece was black, the darkest black imaginable, and there was only one blue person piece inside. "Where's Rose?" he asked his friends. They looked at each other then, suddenly uncomfortable.

"We'll tell you later," John supplied, and Dave was okay with that. He didn't mind so much, right now. He was playing a game with friends, and nothing could bother him anymore.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Yes! Page topper at just the right moment. Your tears are sweet.

Having never known my father (aside from a few foggy early childhood memories), am I supposed to be more struck by all this or less? 'Cause I'm not feeling very shaken at all. I love this update because it's food for thought. Whatever, I'll just take your tears and pretend they're my own.

Originally Posted by ArmsAreLoud

Tears have been shed, Bass.

Whether they are manly or not is unclear.

As much as I'd like to see you cry girly tears, I'm gonna call them manly to combat the pattern that demands men be emotionally closeted.

Originally Posted by Wigmund

Fondly orchestrate unfortunate happenstance

Wigmund, you're the kingpin of misery, as usual. I concede to your bawwmaking skills. Or at least what can be seen of it in the planning phase.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Originally Posted by KilroyWasHere

The Game of Life

White.

That's the first thing Dave thinks of when he opens his eyes. His breathing is ragged, and his hand flies to his chest as if there's a sword plunged in to it. His eyes widen, just a bit, behind his Ben Stiller shades.

There isn't a sword.

He looks down, and confirms it with his eyes. No amulet, no wings, no orange anything.

He's no longer Davesprite. Dave looks behind him, and sees the last traces of orange creamsicle feathers vanishing in thin air. This -

It all comes back to him in a flash. Jack. Bro. The sword fight. Everything should have gone right, they were going to win.

And then it all went straight to shit. Jade must have prototyped that fucking devilbeast of hers, because Noir grew longer ears, a snout, the works - and then came the lightning.

He was trapped in his own thoughts, worried about what had happened to Bro when he heard it.

"Dave!"

No. That couldn't be - John was in the Land of Wind and Shade, wearing the spiderbitch's outfit.

He couldn't be here, in this blank white room, wearing the Wise Guy Suit. It just couldn't be possible.

Then John swept him up in a bear hug, and the doubt was squeezed out of his mind like his breath from his lungs.

John smiled gently, letting Dave drop. The hug was looser, but still present. "What, did you think something like that would stop me? I am the pranking master, Dave. Nothing can beat me!" He interrupted Dave before he could say anything. "Before you ask, yes. This is real. I'm here, and so's Jade, and - "

Dave immediately stepped out of John's hug, as Jade rose from the table she was seated at. The Game of LIFE was spread out on the table, with four pieces set up. The Witch ran to the Knight, and they hugged. "Dave! Oh my God I can't believe you're finally here! It's been so long, it's been months - "

"I - you - the meteors, you - where are we - " Dave's solid barrier of cool, the wall behind which he'd hid for so long, was cracking even further than it had when his friends had died in the first place. "Neither of you can be here!"

Jade continued to smile, still in her old dress. "Don't you worry about that, Jade. I'm fine, John's fine, and you're fine. Everything's great! Now sit down, we're playing LIFE!" She took her own advice then, and sat in the chair closest to the green piece. Dave looked down at the board.

Blue, green, red and... He frowned. Not purple. The fourth piece was black, the darkest black imaginable, and there was only one blue person piece inside. "Where's Rose?" he asked his friends. They looked at each other then, suddenly uncomfortable.

"We'll tell you later," John supplied, and Dave was okay with that. He didn't mind so much, right now. He was playing a game with friends, and nothing could bother him anymore.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Originally Posted by KilroyWasHere

The Game of Life

White.

That's the first thing Dave thinks of when he opens his eyes. His breathing is ragged, and his hand flies to his chest as if there's a sword plunged in to it. His eyes widen, just a bit, behind his Ben Stiller shades.

There isn't a sword.

He looks down, and confirms it with his eyes. No amulet, no wings, no orange anything.

He's no longer Davesprite. Dave looks behind him, and sees the last traces of orange creamsicle feathers vanishing in thin air. This -

It all comes back to him in a flash. Jack. Bro. The sword fight. Everything should have gone right, they were going to win.

And then it all went straight to shit. Jade must have prototyped that fucking devilbeast of hers, because Noir grew longer ears, a snout, the works - and then came the lightning.

He was trapped in his own thoughts, worried about what had happened to Bro when he heard it.

"Dave!"

No. That couldn't be - John was in the Land of Wind and Shade, wearing the spiderbitch's outfit.

He couldn't be here, in this blank white room, wearing the Wise Guy Suit. It just couldn't be possible.

Then John swept him up in a bear hug, and the doubt was squeezed out of his mind like his breath from his lungs.

John smiled gently, letting Dave drop. The hug was looser, but still present. "What, did you think something like that would stop me? I am the pranking master, Dave. Nothing can beat me!" He interrupted Dave before he could say anything. "Before you ask, yes. This is real. I'm here, and so's Jade, and - "

Dave immediately stepped out of John's hug, as Jade rose from the table she was seated at. The Game of LIFE was spread out on the table, with four pieces set up. The Witch ran to the Knight, and they hugged. "Dave! Oh my God I can't believe you're finally here! It's been so long, it's been months - "

"I - you - the meteors, you - where are we - " Dave's solid barrier of cool, the wall behind which he'd hid for so long, was cracking even further than it had when his friends had died in the first place. "Neither of you can be here!"

Jade continued to smile, still in her old dress. "Don't you worry about that, Jade. I'm fine, John's fine, and you're fine. Everything's great! Now sit down, we're playing LIFE!" She took her own advice then, and sat in the chair closest to the green piece. Dave looked down at the board.

Blue, green, red and... He frowned. Not purple. The fourth piece was black, the darkest black imaginable, and there was only one blue person piece inside. "Where's Rose?" he asked his friends. They looked at each other then, suddenly uncomfortable.

"We'll tell you later," John supplied, and Dave was okay with that. He didn't mind so much, right now. He was playing a game with friends, and nothing could bother him anymore.

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

What am I even doing with my life. Once there was a time I wrote other things than incredibly brief and/or incomplete fusion fic. I don't remember that time! Anyway, this is because people kept making "sweet prince" jokes about this picture of Karkat.

'tis a knavish piece of work

"I knew you had a taste for theatrics," Sollux says, "but when we were schoolfellows I knew not your ravenous appetite for folly." He's furious, which is not a good look on him, and he keeps pacing up and down the stairs of the theater, as though he's about to hare off after the girl. "Feferi is an honest maid."

"If she keeps her honor she'll do twice as well as thee." Sollux whirls at the door. "Hast avenged thy father's death while I was not watching? Or art thou still overcome with madness?"

Thou, as if Sollux has the right-- "You speak the truth! Perhaps I have gone mad." He swings the prop sword round. "Perhaps I am that which I seem, perhaps I see blood in every corner, perhaps I am pursued by ghosts of your imagining, you halfwit son of a chapbook and its cousin. Or perhaps I have a plan, and I must act the fool, and drive away my friends and draw my enemies till all around me think they have me heeled, and half a hundred swords are at my throat, and our sweet Princess runs from me ashamed and my best friend accuses me of madness! Indeed there is little to choose between madness and folly, except at the end of one, the king admits he killed my father!"

He stops himself, forcibly, breathing hard, until Sollux begins to come back down the stairs again, his expression unreadable behind the tinted spectacles he wears. He pulls himself up on the stage, and pries the sword, gently, from Karkat's hand.

Karkat collapses into a chair. With more deliberation, Sollux takes the other. In that chair five minutes ago, his player uncle poisoned his player father, and took his crown, until the king rose and gave over the play.

“Thou’rt also mad, Prince Karkat,” Sollux says. “Thou needst not choose; one can be both mad and act the fool. Thou dost, very naturally.”

“Thou again, nothing but thee and thou,” Karkat grumbles, knocking shoulders with Sollux. “Know’st not thou that I am thy prince and not mad besides?”

“Thy tongue speaks it though thy actions belie it and all my heart does muster against it,” Sollux says. With his lisp it’s funnier than he means it to be. “But still you are my friend.”

“You ask each time we meet, and each time, yes,” Sollux says, with a sidelong smile. “And subject, an you lead me into hell.”

“Wilt go thither?” Karkat sighs. He drops his head into his hands. “My uncle Jack is close, and thoughts like vipers do possess my mind, to dispossess his soul. And wilt thou, then, accompany me to the dark depths of wherever fratricides are left? Then thou hast not a grounds to call me mad, for madman cannot bring suit against madman, or who shall be left to fill the bench?”

“Then should the courts of law be emptied all and Terezi brought home again to wed thee,” Sollux protests. “Better you stick to fratricide, Prince Karkat, you’ve no art at logic.”

Karkat laughs at this, a real laugh of the kind he's almost forgotten he had in his arsenal. "Shrive me," he says. "What will anyone do when I'm king?"

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

Once the comic gets more updates going, someone really needs to do something like this with Bro. Then the circle can be complete.

And I can be happy and move on.

Ach! Hans, run! It's the lhurgoyf!AVGN Quote of the Moment-I-Have-Time-To-Update-It: "When we heard that a Ghostbusters game for Nintendo was coming out, we were so excited, we shit our pants! Literally, shit came out our asses and we rocketed through the roof! "

On a deadness scale of normal to doorknob I would rate her as double doorknob

Originally Posted by Jitka

fuck yeah sodium hexametaphosphate

that is my favorite hexametaphosphate

Malakin:because its actually the truman show just with ponys
crash826:that
crash826:makes
crash826:far too much sense
gingerale:xD
Malakin:think about it
Malakin:it all makes sense

Originally Posted by Catbread

Those sound like some pretty badass park rangers.

Originally Posted by ranasan

Wow... it's like if someone managed to manifest Missingno. from Pokemon Red and Blue into the real world, grind it up into a fine powder and then snort it.

18:21 Girard so I learned something at the barber:
18:22 Daniel ?
18:22 Girard The entirety of England, London in particular, is actually a stage for the biggest production of the musical Oliver ever made.
18:22 Girard England is a giant musical.
18:22 Girard This explains the small children with cockney accents and giant hats who dance in the streets.
18:23 Daniel ...DAMN YOU MARY POPPINS!
18:23 Daniel DAMN YOU TO HELL!

:33 < Even when trapped by karma's cycle,The dreams we left behind will open the doooooooor!Evven if the univverse stands in our way,OUR SEETHING BLOOD WILL DETERMINE WHAT WE'LL BE.wE'LL, uH, bREAK THROUGH TIME AND SPACE.And DEFY4LL THOS3wh0 w0uld2top u2TO TAK-EhOlD oFOur Path!TENGEN TROLLPA GURREN LAGANN

Re: MSPA Fanfiction III

I've been bitten by the inspiration bug today. Have a companion fic to Bro.

Davesprite

Davesprite wasn’t proud, but he was willing to admit it. He ran. Well, flew. He left Bro there, lying in the growing red pool. He told himself he was going to warn Dave. He told himself Bro would have wanted it this way. But every time he closed his eyes, he felt the brush of Bro’s fingers reaching for his wing, too weak to grasp more then a few weak feathers.

It’s not like he escaped unscathed. With his wounds, he wouldn’t last more then a day. Sprites didn’t work the same way people did. You couldn’t stitch them up. He was doomed, even if this hadn’t happened he’d have been doomed, he had been doomed since the moment his timeline split off. At first it had felt so good to hear from John and Jade again, but that thrill had almost entirely faded, leaving the sick feeling that he was the interloper here, that he didn’t belong and would never belong.

Sometimes, when he was all alone, he was angry.

He was angry at the game for making all this happen. He was angry at Terezi for splitting off the timeline. He was angry at Jack Noir for killing off the queen and taking the damn ring, he was angry at Jade, John, and Rose for treating him like a ‘lesser Dave’, and he was so very angry at Bro for dying. Most of all, he was angry at himself, for running.

Sometimes, when he was all alone, he was sad.

He hadn’t noticed that Bro had been mouthing at him to run. He hadn’t seen the silent entreaties to warn Dave. So he flew, and took the guilt with him, heavy and sick. Up ahead, Dave was waiting, and he had a warning to give. He flew.