"I'm pleased to announce that after two sleepless nights and several hours' surgery, my Swiss Army Knee is finished and works," he wrote to fans with trademark humour. "It bends in the middle and whilst a problem at airport security, is at least rustproof.

"Being a Swiss Army Knee it may even contain attachments to meet some of the basic tasks outlined in the weird office-boy fantasy outlined in Clarkson's recent post. We must give him some leeway though; he'd been up quite early looking for a crayon."

Encouragingly, he capped off the blog by promising: "Back in action soon."

In his own timeline of events, Clarkson recalled the immediate aftermath of the accident: "At a guess, I'd say he was doing 120 mph when he left the road and that he'd have been going even faster than that when he'd smashed into the road below. He wasn't going to be a pretty sight, that's for sure.

"Our security man is made of sterner stuff and set off down the hill like a racing goat. I watched him arrive at the scene. I watched him intently. I saw him lift his walky talky and I heard him say, 'It's all right fellas. He winked at me.'"