So Rivington, FRAT most of this thread, but are you actually arguing that grappling is homoerotic?

It is when some dude who watches it or participates in it finds it so.

My arguments are much simpler:

a. there are lots of dudes like that out there, and this was especially so in ancient Greece where it was considered unremarkable to head down to the palaestra to check out the local trade.

b. there is, today, a big social and practical difference between a gay guy going to a grappling class full of straight guys and saying, "I'm gay" and a straight guy going to a yoga class full of straight women and saying, "I'm straight"—and that anyone who thinks they are the same (or only "semantically" different) is a big ol' homotard.

Grappling can also be heteroerotic when some dude/chick who watches it or participates in it finds it so.

It's almost like sexuality is subjective or something...

Subjective, but subject to predictable tendencies. Such as, more people will be turned on by grappling than by emptying a dishwasher. Enough so that in at least one cultural context, it is possible to discuss homoeroticism (eros as attraction more than ass sex) as one of the defining characteristics of wrestling.

I have to admit, a dude who can handle a chainsaw skillfully is kind of a turn on for me (no h0m0)

Many things we do naturally become difficult only when we try to make them intellectual subjects. It is possible to know so much about a subject that you become totally ignorant.
-Mentat Text Two (dicto)

but on a serious note, i would actually prefer to grapple with a gay guy over a woman, not because i think i might pop a boner or something, but i tend to use my weight a lot during sparring and kuzure kesa gatame with my full 220 on my lower rib digging into their solar plexus, then i pull on their head and slowly choke them waiting for them to do something stupid before i fail to armbar.

and yes, i am equally uncomfortable fighting a guy that is ~100 pounds lighter than me.