Red Hand of Doom

Our adventure opens as the band of heroes that will come to be known as Six Donkey Show is birthed into being during a chance encounter at The Pink Unicorn, a popular tavern in the trade-city of Dennovar.

The professional scoundrel Danton Ap-Rickard has come into possession of a map detailing the whereabouts of a vault said to contain the treasure of the fallen House of Vraath, but he lacks the muscle necessary to seek it by himself. A need for stalwart companions (hopefully willing to work on the cheap) has brought him to The Pink Unicorn on this day, and it seems that Olidammara has seen fit to smile upon him.

Hailing from the frigid forests of Chuva Norte, the Amazonian princess Penthesilea and the elven druid N’cole are the first two adventurers to join his enterprise. Penthesilea (aka Penny) is searching for the Jewel of Artemis, a legendary treasure stolen from her mother during the destruction of their tribe. Her companion N’cole has persuaded Penny to journey to Elsir Vale to seek an audience with the Keepers of Eth, in the hopes that the druidic circle of Witchwood may have some news of the Jewel’s current location. As Danton is already heading to the Witchwood (for the ruins of Vraath Keep lie within its borders), the two warrior women consent to join forces with him.

Joining this trio is the dwarven wizard Schnoggy Boggins of the Clan Boggins. Schnoggy, it is said, is an outcast twice over: first, for leaving his clan’s respectable mining operation to study the arcane arts and secondly, for killing his sensei in a duel. His reasons for fighting that battle are unknown but the high price he paid for this victory is all too apparent. Schnoggy now carries the weight of the dread Coitus Maximus Curse on his stocky shoulders, and it is a heavy burden indeed. Compelled to mate with all manner of animals, vegetables, and/or minerals, Schnoggy has come to Dennovar in search of a cure for his magical malady. Within the smokey confines of The Pink Unicorn, Master Boggins may have discovered something even better than a salve for his affliction, for in the barbarian princess of Chuva Norte, Schnoggy feels he has at last met a woman capable of bearing the awful force of his insatiable lust.

Rounding out our company of intrepid heroes (as the members of Six Donkey Show hold that “the Sixth Man” in their entourage is none other than the legendary battle bard Rick Astley himself) is Rasheed El-Saleh, a human cleric in service to the dwarven god, Moradin. Like all of us, Rasheed is very much a product of his childhood; it just happens that his was a rearing fucked up beyond all reckoning. Born in a human farming community, Rasheed was taken captive at a young age by the dwarven clans that resided in the nearby mountain range and raised as a thrall. While he gained an immense respect for both the culture and deity of the dwarves during his captivity, Rasheed never forgot the violence of that fateful day and vowed to live out his remaining days as a pacifist. He travels now with Six Donkey Show ostensibly to aid its dwarven wizard and to spread the glory of Moradin (blessed be his name).