I work in publishing and I like to read things. Herewith: free association on books, nice things I ate, publishing, editing, and other nice things I ate.

Saturday, March 05, 2011

humorous things that happened this week

Since I have ascertained there are still people who stop by these parts, I can't resist sharing these stories. I feel like you guys would appreciate them. They shouldn't go to waste.

Story 1

On Monday or maybe Tuesday, a delivery guy came who was from neither FeEx nor UPS. Everyone in the office (which is small and open; your business is my business) flocked around the reception desk to see what was in the GIANT box the mysterious delivery guy had brought.

Guess who it was for? Well, obviously me, or I probably wouldn't find this story as hilarious. I asked the guy who it was from. "Maybe the card will say," he said cryptically.

So I signed, the guy left, and we all looked at the box, which was the size of a mini fridge. A large one. Or maybe a small dishwasher. No, I was not expecting a package. No, I did not have another Amazon binge. No, I wasn't in denial again. No, I couldn't think of anyone who would have a reason to send me a bomb, a severed body part, or a diseased monkey (we've all been reading a lot of thrillers lately).

It turned out to be an Edible Arrangement, and a VERY large and chocolatey one. At first I didn't recognize the name on the card, but the message revealed it was from an author I had rejected. (Yes, you read that correctly.) Apparently my rejection had totally changed her life and helped her get herself on the right path. This made me happy, and taught me a valuable lesson: reject people more often. (And no, the arrangement wasn't poisoned; I live to tell. As does everyone else in the office, those grubbing vultures.)

Story 2

Toward the end of the week, maybe Thursday, I had an email from someone whose name I didn't recognize and whose subject line made me think it was an unsolicited query. I admit I don't love getting unsolicited queries from unagented authors; my press has a firm and easy-to-find policy about the correct way to submit to us, and it sometimes irritates me when people go around this process.

So I opened the letter, prepared to be irritated, and read savagely through to the third paragraph of introductions and reminding us how we were connected to each other (apparently we had met at an event many months ago and I had been very "charming") before I realized there was no manuscript pitch. Only the author pitch. Although there was no mention that the man was an author, only an invitation to dinner or a concert. Oh. I was being asked out.

This is an ABSOLUTE FIRST for me. There was that one time that I went on a business lunch date and apparently the person I was meeting took the "date" part of it more seriously than the "business," but that was only once. But this was proper, courtly, old-fashioned asking out. How he could remember me, I'm not sure, since I only vaguely remember even being at the extremely crowded event he referenced. But hey. The email was complete with delicate flattery and a catalog of all the possible things we could do if I would meet with him.

I wish I could post the whole thing here, it was so amazing. But that would be infringement of copyright (impromptu copyright lesson: the copyright holder of a letter is the person who wrote the letter, not the person to whom the letter was addressed, nor the person in physical possession of the letter).

If he is reading this now, I will be very embarrassed, but I'm just going to have to take that chance. It's too special not to share.

***ETA*** I guess I wasn't clear when I posted this--NO, I will NOT be going on a date with the gentleman in question. I do have a Rally Monkey of many years who would be most put out if I did :)

Josin--ha! Yeah, nothing short of a superpower. Forgive me if I'm a LITTLE bewildered about how it is possible that a) I made such a strong impression and also b) he waited this long to contact me if I did!

Oh, how romantic...he's been thinking about you...and finally got up the nerve to contact you...so shy. I love it! But I love the edible arrangement even more. Soooo cool. Like Linda, I think I'll start "rejecting" more...see if I get some sweets out of the deal.

That's a pretty positive week if I've ever seen one. Have you form-rejected the writer in story 1? Because good rejection takes a lot of work to read and extract meaning from, but if form rejection changed her life well...huh. Good thing that she's on the true path....somewhere else!

That is precious. And those sweet arrangements are expensive! I gold framed my first rejection letter. What the hell, it was so very nice and encouraging. Haven't sent a submission in since, but some day I'll get the nerve again...

HANG ON. A chocolate arrangement the size of a large mini fridge? Could you not have posted a picture? My God, what a treat. I am salivating at the thought of how great that thing must have been. Did you fall upon it like a hungry hyena?

Just found this site and love it. Please post more. As a career writer, I've finally decided to take the novel plunge. Will it work? Will my writing suck? I'll find out. But in the meantime, I'll be coming here for more laughs and inspiration.

My brother asked me about book publication (I guess because I'm an English major and because I've had a poem published) and after giving him some sort of answer I directed him to your blog. So you're still (maybe) getting new readers.