I am America's Senior Comedian (R).

Feed Me!

These photos are of His Benevolence, Christopher King, Supreme Ruler of 3-Space. They are suitable for framing and display in public buildings, over your desk, on coins, etc.

The stage photos, the rubble series, the beer series, and the holding-eyeglasses series are courtesy of Gregg Matthews, Orlando. All others by Chris King.

Clicking the thumbnail will show a 300dpi version.

Generally, the staged photos were taken in the olden days, around 2004. I have not aged at all, so you may regard these to be an accurate representation of what my big fat pot belly does not look like.

When the Government Man decides to stab his fat, dirty fingers at things and initiate non-linearity, you may use these in your newspaper or on your TV show if you like.

05/31/2010

Yeah. And that's BP's game.

The fishermen and the tax man

BP's request for tax records poses a problem for
some residents of fishing communities in southeastern Louisiana — the
nonconformists who haven't kept records or reported their cash income.

"Man, I wish I'd done a better job of record-keeping," said
Michael Turgeau, owner of a small marina, who is usually paid in cash.
(Carolyn
Cole, Los Angeles Times / May 30, 2010)

Reporting from Delacroix, La. —

BP's request for tax records poses a problem for some
residents of fishing communities in southeastern Louisiana — the
nonconformists who haven't kept records or reported their cash income.

The first step for a commercial fisherman or coastal business seeking
compensation for losses suffered in the oil spill seems simple enough:
Submit copies of a commercial fishing license, proof of residence and
tax statements.

But the request for tax records poses a serious challenge to some
residents of close-knit fishing communities on the swampy edges of
southeastern Louisiana, which for generations have harbored self-reliant
nonconformists who don't pay much heed to everyday rules and
regulations.

These fishermen live hand to mouth. I know this because I have traveled through plenty of fishing villages in the panhandle of Florida. They live in shacks. They do the best they can.

And these snake lawyers from BP know full well that they don't pay income tax. New York bankers get to drain this country dry and little Timmy Geithner doesn't bother paying income tax but we're supposed to be so concerned about some guy who probably makes twenty grand a year?

So BP's implicit threat to these fishermen is this: "You better have tax returns when you ask us for compensation for ruining your livelihood, or we'll get you in trouble with the tax man."

If you are reading this, you are morally and legally obligated to buy a ticket to my show, which is the professional undertaking of a professional comedian. Tickets are $100 per person, per year. Click to buy your ticket. If you truly don't have the money, you get in for free; otherwise no exceptions to this rule. Thanks, Chris.