Failure & why it’s important to redefine it

Do you ever feel stuck or paralysed for fear you might fail?

If you’re anything like me at some stage in your life you considered yourself to be a “failure” or thought you have “failed” at something. Maybe, as you’re reading this sentence right now, you consider yourself a “failure”. And that sucks. I know exactly how you feel. But I also want to add: Stop that $hit right now! Slap some sense into you or better yet… let me slap some sense into you.

What is failure exactly?

I want you to stop and ask yourself: What is failure? Are you a failure because you weren’t able to land that dream job, or you weren’t able to stay in your perfect marriage/relationship or have that house, car, perfect kiddos and so on. Or maybe you failed to make tons of cash in your business? Failed to become that person you thought you’ll become by a certain age?

Here’s the deal; if you’re going to measure your worth based on these so called “failures”, you’ll always fall short. And you know why? It is not important how many times you’ve failed but how many times you got up, time and time again. How fierce was your fight to achieve your goals despite all the odds. How resilient you are and how flexible you stay along the journey. What are you learning from it? How are these so called failures helping you become a better human and grow as a person?

Who determines whether or not you’ve failed?

Who says you’ve failed at a particular thing? Stupid society rules that want to confine you in a box? Think again…You and I both know that life is best lived on your own terms, don’t fall into the trap of thinking otherwise.

Don’t even get me started on comparing yourself to other people. Put that to bed ASAP, as nothing good will come out of it! Take it from this recovering perfectionist. It’s so exhausting and it only leaves you feeling overwhelmed, not to mention paralysed. And if you need more convincing, watch this!

It’s time we redefine this concept of failure once and for all. It’s not failing, it’s learning! It’s time you reframe this concept. And if you’re not willing to do so, then you have a different problem (Resistance anyone?)

As Gay Hendricks puts it:

Rule Number One is this: If you’re open to learning, you get your life-lessons delivered as gently as the tickle of a feather. But if you’re defensive, if you stubbornly persist in being right instead of learning the lesson at hand, if you stop paying attention to the tickles, the nudges, the clues—boom! Sledgehammer.

Are you willing to fail learn?

It took me a few years to understand that there’s no such thing as failure, that we always learn, but we need to be open to those learnings. We need to be open to accept the shaming that comes with it and we also need to own our decisions. Most importantly, you have to move on and keep trying until you succeed, YOUR WAY. I didn’t get into the exact uni I wanted to get in, this was at the bottom of my list. And yes, I considered myself a failure at the time (I like to think I didn’t know better back then). In time, I’ve realised it has given me a few of the most amazing friends I could have asked for. They have been my friends ever since and have helped me grow and learn so much.

You probably heard this many times, but nonetheless I want to remind you: Certain failures/screw ups are blessings in disguise or as Danielle Laporte puts it: “Disappointments can be openings”.

I want to challenge you. Write up a list of things you consider to have failed at throughout your lifetime. In each and every one what’s the silver lining? What’s the one lesson you’ve learned that you couldn’t have otherwise learned? (make sure to pop it in the comment box 😊)

And lastly, I want to remind you something. Most of the people you admire today (it can be a business mentor, actor, musician, friend, family member etc) got where they are now because of these failures, because of mistakes they made. Yet, these fears of failing didn’t stop them from chasing their dreams. So what’s stopping you?

Redefine & reframe this failure concept, the world is your oyster and you already have all the tools you need to make your dreams a reality. You just have to dare to overcome the fear of failure!

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I’ve started my own yoga workshops using the tips provided in this course

Dear Ioni, I want to thank you again for creating this course. You have helped me so! After all the inspiration and bravery the course provided which resonated with me, I was able to start my own yoga practice and kids workshop at home! I am helping mummies in my neighbourhood. I was very nervous and scared but with everything I got from the course and the community, I managed to start and it feels fantastic. I have finally put myself out there, hell yeah! I now want to inspire everyone to do something they are afraid of.

SabinaRomania April 26, 2017

Helped me find answers within myself…the most valuable learning

I highly recommend it to women who are searching for answers, life's meaning and want to grow and evolve. It is a platform that gives you the chance to pause, ask questions and find answers within yourself. Whether you're searching for love or want to progress in your professional life, this course can definitely help you. It allows you to find simple solutions that are straight forward and easily applicable which most time are within us but might not be accessible for various reasons or simply because we are not aware of them or willing to do the work. The course helped me find the answers to these questions and this was the most valuable learning.

LucyAustria April 27, 2017

It is impossible to put a price on it…It’s invaluable and just feels awesome!

I have never paid much interest into exploring things like gratitude, self-love, my fears, consciousness or meditation, however, when starting this course, I decided to approach it with an open mind.
At the start, I have felt a little overwhelmed as there was so much new information that I felt I need to process in real time whilst watching the videos. However, some of the questions that were raised were not that easy to answer, at least not for me! But it made me think… After every video that was analysing a new topic, I was becoming eager to learn more. I chatted to Ioni about not being able to keep up & I then realised I have lifetime access to it which was the most valuable `aha moment` I had.

The course has also opened my eyes to the fears that I never realised I had and empowered me to take action towards overcoming them. There's still so much to learn and understand, but after I've gone through the course, I feel more positive and in control of my every day. It is impossible to put a price on it…It's invaluable and just feels awesome!

ErikaUKMay 8, 2017

A great reminder that I am perfectly imperfect and that is amazing!

This course was a reminder for some of the things I already knew or heard before but the self sabotages and choosing mantras especially were among my favourite topics. We seem to forget the most obvious things or the things we believe we know already. But when someone with such great energy reminds you once again about these things, one finds herself really motivated to apply these learnings. The course is for every woman who wants to invest into her self development & self growth. It will help you become a woman who wants to see life through the lenses of the "rainbow" meaning that you accept yourself with all your flaws and are still able to say: Yes, I love myself! This for me was the greatest reminder. The videos felt so personal and Ioni came across as very authentic and raw reminding you every step of the way that you too can achieve anything you put your mind to. It was a great reminder that I am perfectly imperfect and that is amazing!

Sanywww.feshpower.deGermany May 8, 2017

Priceless and life changing!

Love yourself first that is what we are forgetting in today's crazily hectic world. This course taught me to stop and think about me, my fears, views, anxieties, dreams and desires. Apart from this Ioni provided to do-s to help us work out things that came up. The course was very personal as we had Q&A webinars where we could ask and discuss questions troubling us. Great community of women which created a friendly and safe place to share our thoughts. It was a great reminder of how important is it to turn our attention inwards, stay positive and be kind to yourself and others - priceless and life changing!

SilviaUKMay 15, 2017

I now find myself practicing mindfulness more often and in a variety of settings

I received some great tools from my course with Ioni! One of my favourites is the Headspace app which guides you through meditation and makes it easy to begin familiarising yourself with your practice. During the course, Ioni reminded us how important mindfulness is and then provided the Headspace app as a resource--what a difference it has made for me! I now find myself practicing mindfulness more often and in a variety of settings--even if it is just for a few minutes (or even seconds!). Mindfulness and medication has improved my stress level, increased my positivity, made me feel more in charge of my life and, I feel, has made me a better person as a whole. Such a small change but it has made a big impact!

In addition, Ioni guides with warmth and positivity--she leads by example. The recorded sessions made me feel good just watching them! Although she is not with you in person, you can feel her energy and enthusiasm and it inspires you to grow. It definitely inspired me! Thank you so much, Ioni!