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Phoenix: bird that cycles through season of death and rebirth. In my case about every 7 years...like clockwork.

Polaris: name of the North star by which sailors would navigate the oceans searching for new worlds or home.

This blog represents my own journey as a bird of war and healing searching my own soul and sailing through spiritual winds on the oceans of experience, enlightenment, and epic adventure. Within these pages will be messages written on prison walls, mysteries written in the sand, and messages of hope, longing, and lostness in a bottle.

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

“All I want is to expand the Kingdom of God.” Really? Not me. I want people to know who I am. I want my peers to acknowledge me. I want to do something big for God and at the same time leave a trail that leads to my web site. I am self-serving. I wish that weren’t the case. Am I normal?

I used to wonder how the Pharisees drifted so far off course. Now, being a Christ follower and a spiritual leader for a number of years, I see how it happens. We begin with pure, godly intentions. God blesses our efforts, and some rewards come with it. (Let’s call them “perks.”) After time, we feel entitled to those “perks.” After more time, we get competitive and begin to compare ourselves with others. When that happens, our efforts are more about being first than making a contribution. Then jealousy and bitterness take over. All of a sudden, we get caught up in building our own kingdom.

Here’s how I wrestle with this tension. First, I admit that it’s real. Stop denying it. We’re human. We’re flawed. We’re prideful. Second, compensate for our selfishness and pride with generosity and sacrifice:

§ Pass along the great idea even when you know it won’t be traced back to you.§ Give credit to others without mentioning your level of involvement.§ Stop worrying about your position on the org chart. Instead, focus on adding value.§ Allow anonymity to be an act of worship.