Question

I didn't have a shower for my first baby -- can I have one for my second?

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I had my first baby out of wedlock and didn't have a shower. Now my husband and I are expecting our first child together. (He has a child from a previous relationship, too.) Is it okay to have a shower for this baby, even though she'll be our third child?

Mom Answers

I have a 16 month old and am pregnant with our second child. I've been struggling with this decision,too. I've realized that we're in need of SO many things even though we already have a child. If it's been a while since you had a baby, you may need everything from a crib and swing, to clothes and diapers. In our situation, we need another crib since our 1st son will still be in his when this baby comes, along with many new clothes, since our new addition will be born in winter and our 1st was born in the summer. Some people are just rude to say it's tacky to have another baby shower. Whether it's been 1 or 10 years since you had a baby, every new baby has needs. Go start your baby registry and have fun at your baby shower =) Who do you know that would want to celebrate the coming of a new baby with you?

I'm sorry, but to the one who believes it's TACKY to have subsequent showers should learn to see more than black and white. There are many families out there living the gray, needing all the help they can. Baby stuff is expensive, I don't care who you are. The majority of us out there can't afford it on our own. I am unexpectedly expecting my third with my youngest being 5. I didn't have a thing for this baby, and had it not been for the love of my friends and family celebrating the tiny miracle growing inside me, I don't know what I would have done. So God Bless all the soon to be moms, and even God Bless the tacky author.

I think it is a wonderful idea to celebrate each child. They are a gift! If you really don't need baby stuff, have your girlfriends do a shower for just you. Mother's day isn't the only day that moms should be appreciated and celebrated!!!

I had my first child out of wedlock and was thrown two baby showers. I surprise one at work by a co-worker and the other by my cousin. Now 5 years later, I'm expecting my second by my fiance and it is his first child. I really didn't see it as a big deal this time and was even a bit skeptical. However, my bestfriend is super excited, and thanks to her, I'm having a shower for my son to be. You should definitely have a shower for any child brought into this world. It's not tacky, greedy or wrong. Don't let anyone tell you different.

I'm having my second child, and have declined a shower this time. Although it's been 4 years since I had my son, I kept everything I needed for a new baby. My husband and I are going to have a "Welcome Home" party at our house for the baby so that family and friends and come see it after it's arrived. But I think it's perfectly fine to have subsequent showers. I've attended many myself. My feeling is that if someone has a problem with subsequent showers (they feel it's tacky or greedy?) then STAY HOME. No one wants to be around you with that attitude anyway.

I feel a woman deserves a shower even if it is her 5th baby! It is a big deal to conceive and create a new life. Even a bigger deal to birth and then raise a child. So a celebration is in order EACH time! Possibly the showers won't be as big or elaborate with your 3rd or 4th baby but still it is not tacky for friends and family to want to shower you with love and support each time.

as others were saying i was the second born child and when i got older i was reading through mine and my brothers baby books. i was slighty offended as a child when half of my baby book wasn't filled out and there were empty pages where i didn't get a party. i really felt like my brother being born was more important then me.

I don't think that it's inappropriate to have a shower for a second or subsequent child. I myself am being given a shower for my second child due in December. My first was a girl and this one is a boy. Also we were planning on waiting at least another 3 years, or not having any more at all, so we had given away or donated all of our "big" items. Luckily we have great family and friends who insisted that we have another shower so they could help us out. Showers are for celebration, why shouldn't each child get their own party?

I wasnt sure about having another shower either. I am having one, but my friends are throwing it for me. I told them that it wasnt nessecery, but they want to. So why not? Especially since my son just turned three, and i have NOTHING for my little girl to come. I gave my stuff to people who needed it, because i didnt want more till i got married. I think its fine to have a second shower, but i wouldnt throw myself one. if friends or family want to do it for you, then i think it would be fine. Like i said im worried about what people think, but then again im not, becuase i dont have anything for a newborn. Not even ONE bottle. Have the party and have fun!!!!

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