Rock
star Kendrick Main is living the dream—or so it seems to the outside world.

In reality, he’s trapped in a lie that’s consuming his soul and destroying his
family. For years, the owner of his record label has manipulated and
blackmailed him, forcing him to deceive the world and hide the existence of
those he loves the most: his wife and children.

Unable to see a way out that won’t destroy the lives of his bandmates and brothers,
he loses himself in the bottle. His downward spiral ends when he wakes up in
intensive care after a near-fatal drunken crash. With nothing left to lose, he
buys out of his contract and announces the existence of his wife and kids to
the waiting paparazzi.

Penniless and lost, he has nothing to show for his former success but a broken
family and a mile-long list of people he’s let down. When the pain and
suffering that surrounds him trickles down to his children, Kendrick vows to
right his wrongs—hopefully taking down the man who ruined his life and winning
his wife back in the process.

After covering Clara with the blankets, Eliza starts playing
with her hair and singing to her softly.

Clara yawns and sleepily says, “No singing.”

I nearly laugh out loud, but manage to refrain. Whereas I am
musically gifted, Eliza can’t hold a tune to save her life. There is not a
musical bone in her body. It’s yet another of the many reasons I love her.

Back home in Pennsylvania, my dad is a music professor and my
mom teaches music at an elementary school. I got my first guitar before I could
walk and was immediately hooked.

Until Eliza and I got together, my entire life
revolved almost completely around music. Her total lack of any musical sense or
ability was refreshing and unique, and once I became famous, it became like a
refuge from the industry that was consuming me.

Eliza is well aware of her handicap, so she isn’t upset by
Clara’s request. I can just make out her smile in the dim light. “I know. Daddy
is so much better than I am,” she admits.

Clara is quiet for a while and I think maybe she’s fallen
asleep, but then I hear her little voice.

“Does Daddy still love me?” she asks.

Upon hearing my child doubt my love for her, my heart aches, my
stomach churns, and the urge to drown myself in a bottle of hard liquor is
almost overwhelming. I want nothing more than to make myself numb to the pain.
I am so overcome with shock and despair that I don’t even reach for my rubber
band. Yet another precious name goes on the list of people I’ve let down.

“Of course he does!” Eliza assures her. “Why would you think
that?”

“Daddy used to say he sang to us to show how much he loves us,”
Clara explains. “Now he doesn’t sing at all.”

“Oh, honey,” Eliza says sadly, leaning down and cuddling Clara.
“Daddy loves you so much, whether he sings to you or not. He’s
just having a really hard time right now. When he sang to other people, it
caused a lot of trouble that hurt lots of people. For now, even singing to us
reminds him of that, and it hurts his heart.”

My child questioning my love, my wife brought to tears on my
behalf, the shattered mess of my once beautiful life—it’s all more than I can
bear.

Kay
lives in the Sunshine State with her husband and three kids. She’s had ideas
for stories running through her head her entire life, but started writing
seriously to retain her sanity as a stay at home mom. She’s random,
opinionated, and a total science nerd. Her hobbies include reading, watching
football, eating donuts, and singing badly.