​The best sex in my opinion is sex that pushes our boundaries and makes us anxious. If not, sex just becomes consistent and safe, that equates to boring and limited sex. Experts state that pushing yourself into sex that makes you anxious is not only a sign of growth, but a direct move towards hotter orgasms. As humans we tend to focus on touching the body, and thus ignoring the high arousal of the verbal. I understand that there are those who are not fully into "dirty talk", but a little verbal reinforcement can go a long way in being sexual stimulated. For example dirty talk should be confined to the bedroom, sex can exist anywhere with sexting; furthermore sexting has become one of the best forms of arousal and eroticization.

Sex is about assessing compatibility and opening yourself and partners to what arouses us, and if both are an erotic match. Remembering that what you want sexually is not always possible, and relationships have limits

There is no way that anyone can make someone into a sexual being that they're not, but it's how we respond to a partner that is making a sexual request and especially when it comes down to a deep communication of care. So when asking your partner to talk dirty to you is not just about wanting some filth talk so that you can "get off". It becomes a request to be a good partner and learning how important you and sex are together. If you trust your partner, and you feel comfortable and safe with - asks for sex that tests or is outside of your boundaries, ALLWAYS DO IT!

Just keep in mind that if you want your partner to talk dirty to you, you have to ask for it, no one can read minds. Keep in mind that is you're going to ask something uncommon from someone, be prepared to show them as well. So next time you want some dirty talk make sure you establish boundaries as to what words are acceptable and what words are not. And it’s a bonus if your partner is more on the top or dom side of the sexual continuum, I've learned to test the waters and know that not everyone has the temperament, interest or sexual ability to give me the filth talk, and that's OK!