I began 2014 setting the intention to stop comparing myself to others. You may also recall from that post, that I also came to the conclusion that I should stop caring so much what other people think about me.

The funny thing about intentions and well, the Universe really, is that when you put something out there, you have to make sure you mean it. As I reflect on the past half year, I see a common thread among some of the more challenging situations I’ve had to face–from negative feedback, to a personal health crisis and a pregnancy that is not going the way I envisioned. What keeps coming up in these situations, and happens to keep me afloat, is my intention of not comparing myself to others. It is a constant practice and in a way you could say, my intentions set the stage for the year ahead.

This has not been an easy task by any means. Believe me. I’ve been pretty challenged lately.

It’s really easy to get sucked in to the comparison bubble. When something doesn’t go the way you expect, you may ask “why me?” This simple question is one of comparison. Let me ask you this. In that moment of “why me” aren’t we really asking ourselves “why not somebody else? why do I have to go through this and they don’t.”

First, don’t believe everything you read, see and hear. For example, I know plenty of people that selectively choose what appears on their Facebook and Instagram feed. Very often it’s only part of the truth, in order to support the version of themselves they want to present to the world. This is good marketing, but can lead to a distortion of reality,and mostly on the side of the reader. My advice, don’t let their insecurities pull you down. You don’t know the whole story, so don’t get sucked in to it.Second, take a break. If you feel put out by what comes across your social media feed then stop browsing. If it’s a good friend that’s making you feel less than, step back for a bit. I took a nice long break from my Facebook feed while I was dealing with my health this spring and it was hands down one of the best things I’ve done for my spirit in a long time. Doing so gave me time to reflect and realign my priorities.Finally, take the higher road. Instead of feeling put out by others successes, rejoice in them. It’s one of the four keys to happiness in the Yoga Sutras and it’s a great way to practice your yoga. Remember, I am you, you are me….

My teacher Dharma says (and I’m paraphrasing here) if you believe in the rules of karma then you’ll never have any worries because when you understand how karma works you are not bothered by “why me and not someone else?” Instead, you realize that the challenges you face are part of your karmic cycle. The only way to it is through it baby!

So say you realize this concept and fully believe it, does it make it any easier? Heck no! You’re still human and you’re probably going to fight against things that seem to happen to you. But remember, they aren’t happening to you, they are just happening. Let go.This is all part of the practice too.

Have you taken time to reflect on your intentions this year? What has come up for you? How have you moved through these situations? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

“We must go through what we’re going through, in order to get where we are going.”

We all have obstacles to tackle. With these obstacles comes adversity and sometimes a little suffering. Whether it be big or small, this suffering, or emotional experience of unpleasantness, can either make us shrink away from life or catapult us in to a new realm of being.

I have to believe that the suffering (and I use that term in the general sense) I’ve endured over the past six months, and in general over the last two years, is all for the greater good. Even on my darkest days, I believe that I have never been given anything that I cannot handle. I know that Divinity is working through me for some greater understanding so that I may be able to help ease the suffering of others, much like my teachers have done for me.

Often I worry that I’m doing something wrong and get caught up in feelings of “when will I catch my break?…”when will good things happen to me?” At times like this it takes great strength to remind myself that there are good things happening to me all the time and that this temporary stage of discord is just another lesson laid before me to make me stronger and prepared for something bigger. Repeating the words of Henry Miller “true strength lies in submission which permits one to dedicate his life, through devotion, to something beyond himself.”

I teach and write from the most honest, and often times vulnerable, place I can. I do not assume that I know all, but attempt to impart some knowledge based on my experiences. I remind myself that if I have not suffered, how can I help others? This is not to say that I’d like to continue to suffer forever, but rather, a way to make sense of the obstacles I feel I am continuously having to push through. Suffering brings an opportunity for growth and my practice (on the mat, teaching, writing, studying) is the cultivation of the awareness needed to turn these obstacles into great lessons.

Perhaps that seems lofty to you? I have always felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. If you ask my mom, she’d probably tell you I was born that way! It is my practice that helps me to lighten my load, turning breakdowns into breakthroughs and coming out clearer on the on the other side.

Om Gam Ganapataye Namah!

What tools do you use to “turn it around” when you feel discouraged? How has your yoga practice impacted “the work” you are doing?

There are few scholastic experiences throughout my life that have really stuck with me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a bonafide school nerd through and through and would spend my days happily amongst the erudite set if I could. Even with all that passion for learning, I’ve found that not all teachings are created equal and very few are applicable out of the classroom in my everyday life and practice.

My theatre professor Tom Arthur used to tell us repeatedly that you never “just” do anything. Nothing “kind of or sort of” happens in life or on stage. And what’s the opposite of doing? Well, it’s dying, of course. Right?

I was totally baffled when I first heard this theory. I mean, didn’t Nike make millions on the phrase “Just Do It” and wasn’t I told repeatedly as a child to “Just Say No.” Clearly, I thought, Mr. Arthur has spent way too much time over analyzing the mechanics of acting. I recall us all staring at him blankly, waiting for further explanation, wondering how in the world this was going to fit in to my Acting 101 class. I “just” wanted to get up there and act after all.

Finally, after much dramatic pause, he divulged his secret.

The theory is that using phrases like “just, kind of, sort of, like” and so on, cheapen the experience and believability of emotion and intention within a scene. When you “just” walk across the room or “kind of” say a line, you are not fully committed to the intention of the characters you are presenting. For him, every scene is life and death and if you can’t commit, you die. The character fizzles out amongst all others on stage and you’re left blubbering up there alone. Further, there is a specific need or want within every exchange we have with others, and it was our job as his students to identify those needs with clear and deliberate language and action in order to survive.

Whoa, slow down Mr. Seriouspants! That’s a lot to take in for my overeager, analytical, perfectionist mind. You mean, it’s always life and death? It’s always yes or no. There isn’t a gray area? The answer, yes.

Using these words disintegrates your active voice and your words, actions, and intentions become passive. Taking away these “disclaimers” aids in clarifying why you do what you do, making you say what you mean to say, and striping away the layers of vulnerability in the process. We worked tirelessly to rid ourselves of this minutiae, no longer hiding behind them, but instead presenting ourselves and characters to the world with clear and honest action.

So, how does this apply to practice? Simply put, you don’t “just breathe,” you “breathe.” You don’t “kind of move,” you “move.” You don’t “sort of” set an intention for practice, you “set one.” Catch my drift? Be clear, active, and present in all you do, otherwise you’ll experience life from a passive, negative perspective. What we say and do makes up who we are, so be sure you’re fully committed to You. Take away all the extra fluff and get down to business. Otherwise, what are you really doing here?

The outcome of this work is simple. As you practice living actively you become aware of your Self within your surroundings. Your actions and intentions no longer live in a world of cluttered consiousness and you become steadfastly present in you. By simply working to eradicate a few simple phrases from your vocabulary you ultimately step into a playing field much larger than yourself.

I challenge you for the next 24 hours to stop and think about what you are saying, how you are saying it, and put your words into active use. Stop being lazy and get rid of the “disclaimers.” Start doing the work, and see if you are able to tap in to clearer intentions and conscious awareness.

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