Why Me! Spacing Out

I was at my bf's house and he was giving me a tour when I had to pee really bad. We hadn't gotten to his parents' room or the bathroom yet. So I went to the next door on the right. It was his parents' room and his dad was butt-naked! Now I can't ever go over there again.
Stephen's GF, OH

I signed up for wood shop this year because I thought there would be a lot of guys in the class -- and, wouldn't you know, I was right! My crush just happened to be in the same class. We were working on our projects one day, and I went to cut a board. I wasn't really paying attention, and a piece of it flew across the room and hit my crush. He fell to the floor! I even had to go get some ice for him. I was so embarrassed. I don't think I really have a chance with him anymore.

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It had snowed over the night one winter day. I invited my best friends and my crush over for a snowball fight and just to have fun. All my friends got down to make snow angels. I thought it was lame, but I got down and did it anyway. Well, I got up to view my masterpiece and was horrified: Right where I had sat my bum down, there was a pile of dog poop that was now uncovered! Everyone laughed and said I had pooped my pants. It was awful!

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There was this really hot guy in my math class last year and all the other guys in the class were talking about how strong he was. So to prove his strength he came over to me and tried to pick me up, but when he did, my water bra broke -- and when he put me down he was soaking wet.... I was humiliated and flat-chested!

Once, I was at an art fair and I had to go to the bathroom. So I went into the Porta-Potty and, well, you know. There was a little thing next to a toilet that looked like a sink, with what I thought was a bar of soap in it. I stuck my hands in, and then realized it was a urinal. YUCK. The "bar of soap" was really to cover up the scent. To make matters worse, there were NO sinks or water anywhere. I had to walk around all afternoon with pee on my hands. I was mortified!

My friend Frankie offered to give me a ride home so I jumped in the car. I was wearing a skirt. Little did I know that my upper thigh/butt landed right smack-dab on two dimes that had been sitting in the sun all day long. I screamed out in pain and started rubbing my butt. After a while I looked at my thigh/butt and saw that the dimes had left two little marks on the back of my thigh. Not just two red marks but also two actual imprints of dimes, with the torch and the two plants next to it. I was so humiliated. It stayed branded on my butt for almost a week!

I was at a softball game, and my boyfriend was the coach's son, so he got to sit in the dugout. Well, it was my turn to bat, and my boyfriend was coaching third base, so he blew a kiss for good luck. When I stepped up to bat, I hit the ball down the third-base line, and the ball hit him right in the jaw. He never coaches third base anymore!

One day when I was at school, they called me in for state crew in the auditorium. My friends and I were helping to put down some chairs for the Christmas show that night, and I was in the choir. When we finished putting down all the chairs, my best friend, who is also in the choir, decided to wait until the music started, then we'd get onstage and start singing. We didn't know that they had already started to mop the floor, so we walked up and the custodian told us to go all the way around. We turned around and I slipped. Everyone on the stage saw and started cracking up.

I was in gym class and we had to change into our bathing suits. I had just gone to the bathroom and I came out of the locker room with toilet paper stuck to my butt under the bathing suit. If that wasn't bad enough, my crush came up to me and pulled it out. My new nickname is now "toilet papa."

My friend and I decided to stay at another friend's house for her birthday. Her brother and I are and were going out, so I was really excited about staying the night. Well, everyone had stayed up late that night, and the next morning, everyone was asleep, except for my boyfriend and me. I was sitting on the counter in the kitchen, and we started making out. We thought we heard a door open and close, so we stopped and went in the living room and watched some TV. The next day, I mentioned to my friend about me and him making out and asked if it was her who opened and closed the door. She said no. Well, she told another friend of ours, and now every time someone mentions a counter or kissing, they sing Shaggy's "It Wasn't Me," but ONLY the part about the counter. They are NEVER gonna let me live this down!