Flashes of insight from the Everyman. Weekly observational posts. Part comedy, part philosophy, part temper tantrum, Lightning Bug's Butt is always good for a laugh and/or a place to send your hate mail.
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6/15/2011

WWKW

WWKW

{1} You have been asked to give a 10 minute speech to teenage girls. What is it about?
{2} Do you have a pet? Tell us about them. No pets? Why?
{3} What is the biggest inconvenience about the place you’re currently living?
{4} What do you think is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
{5} What are the THREE "nevers" of your life? (things you would never do or have never done)

Answers:

1) Ten-minute speech to girls: Ten minutes isn't a lot of time. So I'd rattle off the following: Don't let the fashionable but false belief that men and women are the same, seduce you. It's bunk. You're different. Embrace it. And if you want to understand how and why, read some layman evolutionary biology. Not only is it fascinating, but it'll give you tremendous insight into women's and men's penchants, behaviors, emotions and sexuality. Also, know that college is the most overrated and overpriced commodity. Don't go 100 grand in debt before you discover that! Women and minorities are particularly vulnerable because we're so damn hot and heavy to outfit them with (always expensive and often useless) college degrees. Don't get me wrong: Education is wonderful. But college is a racket. Take great care when investing in your education.

2) My Pet: I have an adorable puggle named Bella. And if you want to see her, just visit IA for a facsimile. See: Lexi.

3) Inconvenience of living where I live: It's 150-miles away from my job -- the most wonderful hospital in the world! Luckily I only have to commute once per week!

4) My best decision: To be the kind of person who examines things instead of accepting things. I don't know if I decided this or if I was just born this way. Choosing to observe once in a damn while is a good choice. A close second was my decision to keep a weblog.

5) Three never's:1) I'll never "go green." They might force me one day. But I'll never volunteer. 2) Run for political office. One has to stand back in awe of the wrath the other side spits at their political opponents. 3) Live beyond my means. A couple things I've gleaned from 40 years on this planet: stuff doesn't make you happy; and debt is slavery.

So I assume you don't recycle? My hubby and I argue about that every Wednesday night as I force him to carry the recycling bins to the curb. I;m just trying to do my part and he says we're making someone else rich off of our trash.

I'm not big on going green either. I'd rather skip right past the mercury-filled CFL bulbs and just go with the LED bulbs, if they can ever perfect them. If there's one thing we've learned beyond doubt over the years, it's that the EPA destroys whatever it touches.

My husband is telling me to start hoarding regular light bulbs b/c he says in a few years we will all be forced to use those swirly ones. (You can tell how green I am by my command of green terminology.)

Amen to education and the rest of your "nevers" I didn't do a wwkw this week, but getting a tattoo would have been on my list.

Seriously 150 miles? One way? I am sure you have a dang good reason to have NOT relocated.:)

I love your advice to girls. I couldn't agree more about college. I went to a 4 year right out of high school and I didn't have a clue what I wanted to do. I've never once used my degree, other than to slap it on a resume like a gold star. It was fun, but I definitely wish I'd started out at a JC and really thought about what I wanted to do. Where were you 10 years ago LB?