Sally Abrahms, AARP Blogs

Caregiving | Home & Family | RelationshipsThere’s a children’s book series that has come out in the last year about a young girl named Carlyn and her visits to her grandmother in assisted living. It debunks the stereotypes about old people and long-term care. Here’s one line from Carlyn Meets Granny Girl’s New Friends: “Wow, this does not look like a place creepy people live, and I do not smell anything weird, either!” Carlyn said. There’s an even more interesting story behind the book. It’s written by …

Caregiving | Home & Family | RelationshipsGet ready to see more older homeless men and women on the street. Since most don’t have families or are estranged from them, there’s no family caregiver. Here’s a TED talk that gives perspective on homelessness. The U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development reports there are 1.6 million homeless people a year on any given day. According to an NPR story, more than half of single homeless adults are age 47+. Younger boomers born between 1955-1965 are driving the aging …

Caregiving | Home & Family | Your Life“Sally Abrahms can take her crown off now!” Ouch. That was one response to my story that recently ran in the AARP Bulletin explaining common emotions (guilt, grief, exhaustion) family caregivers have and strategies for dealing with them. I was writing about my own experience — I’m a long distance caregiver, not someone who lives 24/7 with a sick or chronically needy parent — as well as what I have observed from my work. That reader could have been less strident, …

Caregiving | Home & FamilyIf you’re considering long-term care, expect to pay more for nursing homes, assisted living communities and homemakers/companions, MetLife Mature Market Institute’s annual 2012 survey reveals. Good news: the study of average national long-term care costs shows they’ve stayed the same for adult day services and home health aides. Of course, rates and services vary by state and area; those differences are included in the survey. Take a look at national average costs: A private room in a nursing home is $248/day, …

Bulletin Today | Caregiving | Personal HealthMedicare beneficiaries: If you’ve been impacted by Hurricane Sandy and can’t meet the Dec. 7 annual open enrollment period deadline, the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) is offering other options. The best scenario is to select the Medicare plan you want for 2013 in time to ensure your health and prescription drug coverage kicks in by Jan. 1, 2013. But what if you can’t? If you can’t select a plan by Dec. 7 you can still enroll in …

CaregivingTrend alert or rather, trend-to-be alert. I recently heard of a new concept that sounds like a caregiver’s dream: a team of professionals from various disciplines (i.e. legal, financial, caregiving) who specialize in aging issues. Someone on the team steers you to other experts you need — and may not even realize you need. These pros confer to make sure all your bases are covered. Rod Chamberlin, a financial planner in Irvine, California, has one such team. Besides a financial …

CaregivingIt’s hard to find a more stunning statistic: Nearly 45 percent of hospitalizations among nursing home residents enrolled in Medicare or Medicaid are avoidable. Because of their complex and chronic health care needs, annual spending for their care is more than $300 billion. The total 2011 costs for avoidable hospitalizations for this group are $7 billion to $8 billion. Now the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) has a plan to stanch the hemorrhaging of money and unnecessary hospital …

Caregiving | Home & Family | WorkHere we go again. More black-and-white confirmation that elder responsibilities often negatively impact both employees and companies. A new fact sheet out from the AARP Public Policy Institute, in chilling percentages, shows the enormity of the issue and the need to implement or enhance workplace programs. Let me lay it out. Here are the statistics I found particularly revealing: 61 percent of family caregivers age 50-plus work either full-time (50 percent) or part-time (11 percent). 42 percent of U.S. employees have …

Caregiving | Your LifeI’m jazzed about AARP’s annual Life@50+ member event going on this week in New Orleans. Attendees can exercise with Martina Navratilova, listen to all kinds of music, hear commentators James Carville and Mary Matalin argue politics, and take in sessions on such meaningful topics as finance, work, scam artists, social media and happiness. I like to think the biggest attraction, at least so far, has been today’s session on caregiving — and not just because I was on the panel! The …

Caregiving | Home & FamilyWhat’s it like to be a family caregiver if you’re Hispanic or African American and your loved one has been hospitalized? “Invisible” is one of the words used to describe the experience. “Unprepared” for the enormous responsibilities (injections, tube feedings, wound care, complicated medical issues) post-hospital could be another. To compile the report, “Meeting the Needs of Diverse Caregivers,” just out from the AARP Public Policy Institute, researchers spoke with Hispanics (both English and Spanish speaking) and African Americans as well …

Caregiving | Home & FamilyWhen we think of elder abuse, it’s typically the caregiver harming the care recipient. Right? But a horrifying story this week in the press made me wonder, how often are the tables turned and under what circumstances? And, if those being cared for do occasionally hurt family caregivers, what are the warning signs? Here’s the story that triggered those questions: a New York City wheelchair-bound 69-year-old with memory loss threw acid on his daughter, his sole caregiver. He has confessed, …

Home & Family | CaregivingA new national survey confirms what some of us already know: Many older Americans take care of others and are not just on the receiving end. Let’s get specific. In this first-ever United States of Aging survey, half of respondents identify someone as their caregiver, while nearly one-third say they care for another person. Those are just two caregiving results culled from the survey, created by the National Council on Aging, UnitedHealthcare and USA Today. Its purpose is to gauge …

Home & Family | CaregivingDying may be taking a turn for the better. People, it seems, are beginning to talk about end-of-life issues before the end. Surveys show that 70% of people want to die at home, yet 70% die in hospitals or nursing homes. Who would want that to happen to them, their spouse, parent or friend? Or anyone? One person who certainly doesn’t is former syndicated columnist Ellen Goodman. Over the past two years, Goodman and others — clergy, physicians, journalists, caregivers, …

Home & Family | CaregivingLiving in a nursing home is not easy. When you are gay, it can be so much more complicated. Unless you’re at a progressive long-term care facility, staff (and fellow residents) may act less than warm and fuzzy, the Nursing Home Reform Act notwithstanding. Put simply, you or your visiting partner, if you’re lucky enough to have one, may not feel welcome. State laws that deny LGBT couples the same benefits as married heterosexuals reinforce their frustrating situation. Many older …

Caregiving“One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do. Two can be as bad as one. It’s the loneliest number since the number one.” It seems that singer/lyricist Harry Nilson was onto something. A new University of California, San Francisco study on the impact of loneliness in later life underscores the importance of social support. UCSF geriatricians discovered that loneliness and isolation can lead to a decline in physical health and even early death. Related: All the Lonely People They’re …

Caregiving | Home & Family | Personal HealthStories about eating disorders and older adults pop up periodically, and a new study is likely to stoke the conversation. It reveals the prevalence for women of anorexia, bulimia, and binge-eating, thought to be the domain of the under 18 set. In a University of North Carolina online survey of 1,849 women age 50+, 13 percent reported eating disorders, with 79 percent saying their weight or shape negatively affected their self-image. Forty-one percent checked their body every day, while 36 …

Caregiving | Personal HealthFor dementia caregivers, it seems that daily meditation can lower depression, improve cognitive functioning—yes, we’re talking about the caregiver here—and even reduce cellular aging caused by stress. According to a recent UCLA study reported in the International Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry, meditation did a better job of keeping the blues at bay than a relaxation CD given to caregivers. This study may be small, but compelling because: 5.4 million people in the U.S. have Alzheimer’s More than 15 million Americans …

Caregiving | Home & Family | Work | Your LifeLast week the Department of Labor (DOL) released a guide on the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) that working family caregivers may find invaluable. The step-by-step, easy-to-read resource outlines who is eligible for FMLA, how employees can apply for and take leave and their rights to keep their job when they’re ready to return to work. FMLA allows workers to take up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave for, among other reasons, caregiving for loved ones who are ill. …

CaregivingWahoo, eldercare has arrived! The latest federal survey, which tracks how much time people spent per day working, performing household tasks, engaging in leisure activities, and taking care of children in 2011, has a new category: Eldercare. This entry into the annual American Time Use Survey (ATUS), put out by the Bureau of Labor Statistics, reflects the deepening responsibilities Americans age 15+ have for providing unpaid care to someone over age 65–perhaps a parent, spouse, relative or friend. And just …

Personal Health | Home & Family | CaregivingWant to feel better? Think nature. Healing gardens are a growing trend. Many major medical centers, including the 6,300-square-foot rooftop garden at the Yawkey Center for Outpatient Care, part of the Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston and the NIH Clinical Center, and long-term care facilities, are adding them. And so are homeowners. The basic elements of a healing or therapeutic garden include: Plants and wildlife Walkways Private sitting areas Shade A water feature Most are outdoors. Some have raised planters …

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Dr. Bill Thomas

Dr. Bill Thomas is an international expert on elderhood and geriatric medicine. He is the founder of the Eden Alternative and Green House Project, a writer and musician. Follow Dr. Bill on Twitter and Facebook.