Cinema protest more popular than film!

ASLEF members last night handed out leaflets at the premier of the film ‘Three and Out’ to protest at the insensitivity of a ‘comic caper’ whose plot concerns suicides on the Tube.

The reaction of the public was overwhelmingly sympathetic. ‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen trade unionists so popular!’ joked Finn Brennan of the union’s LUL train functional committee.

Over 30 tube drivers passed out letters pointing out that, ‘You’ll have to excuse us for not seeing the funny side of people being killed on the railway.’ The reasoned and dignified message concluded, ‘So as you’re munching your popcorn, please take a moment to think about those people for whom railways deaths are a tragedy, not a comedy.’

Following complaints that London Underground had assisted in the making of the film, its managing director Tim O’Toole conceded in a staff bulletin that ‘in hindsight it may have been better to refuse cooperation’. The union is pressing for higher standards of post-traumatic counselling for its members across the whole industry.

General Secretary Keith Norman said that last year 249 train drivers had to get down from their cabs to see a corpse under their wheels. ‘I can’t find anything amusing about people so distressed that they are driven to suicide, and these incidents can mean ‘life-changing traumas’ for drivers who have been involved,’ he said.

Media coverage for the union’s views was overwhelming, with union spokesmen featuring on every TV, radio station and national newspaper in the country.

‘Star-spotters’ at the premier were overwhelmingly sympathetic – in sharp contrast to the critics!