Things To Know

1. Math was invented by the government to take up the time that should be spent learning about the Bible. 2. How heated family book club meetings could get. 3. Mom’s breast milk makes the best ice cream! 4. Looking out a window during school time is punishable by the closet of pain. Oh the memories! 5. That awkward moment[Read More…]

7:30 A.M. – Wakes up. 8:02 A.M. – Takes a shower. 8:37 A.M. – Converses with his own reflection in the bathroom mirror. 9:12 A.M. – Goes to the kitchen and eats a bowl of plain oatmeal and discovers that he is entirely out of raisins, but remains unphased. 10:08 A.M. – Walks confidently into his private home theatre[Read More…]

Not sure if you are truly Appalachian? Check out this list of five things that every true App State student knows. 1. Chancellor Everts’ email password You know you’re a true student of Appalachian when you can recite Chancellor Everts’ email password without even thinking about it. It’s just that easy. 2. Chancellor Everts’ Social Security Number I know this[Read More…]

1. He never asks you about your day. When you come home after a hard day at work, you want him to ask you how you’re doing with love and sincerity, but he just sits on the counter and eats the gnats buzzing around your week old bananas. How selfish. 2. He sucks at[Read More…]

By: Appalachian State Sophomore Frank Hanlon Look, I get it. Different people have different privileges. I’ve heard it many times. I don’t need to see some stupid bulletin board over in East Hall to know that. But when did it become okay to blame white guys for things we can’t even control, like the people who have ACTUALLY accused me[Read More…]

By: Mike Willard At first it was a little annoying. He’d have a pile of dirty clothes here or there in our living room, but I let it slide because we all make mistakes, right? Then he started forgetting it was his week to take out the trash, which pissed me off, but[Read More…]

Review by Griffon Blake, Beta Rho Omicron brother Man, what a fucking ripoff. Me and the guys were all pumped for some hot babes strutting on stage, right here on campus, but holy shit it’s like they weren’t even trying to be sexy. What even was the point?? For real though. Even though some[Read More…]

5-Paprika Lightly sprinkling paprika on your partner during foreplay is a great way to liven up the mood. Paprika can be mild, hot, or even sweet, so experiment to find the best flavor for you and your lover. It also goes great on eggs! 4- Vanilla Beans: Crush vanilla beans onto your partner during intercourse for a familiar, universally loved[Read More…]

Aries: You will accomplish great things this month. Unfortunately no one will want to hear about them and you will probably even lose a few friends out of jealousy. Taurus: Humility is your virtue this month. You will not see it coming, but at some point you will be naked in public and it will be very embarrassing. Gemini: Saturn’s[Read More…]