Summary

This is my first time writing a story with a female protagonist. Needless to say, I’m very curious to see what kind of feedback I’m going to get on this one! So please, post your comments below!

Carrier

Looking back, maybe I should have seen the signs. I mean, ever since Matt had moved in with me six months ago, some of the spark had gone out of our relationship. When we first started dating each other, everything was so passionate and spontaneous. Like, we’d just suddenly decide to fly to Barbados for a romantic weekend. And I nearly maxxed out one of my credit cards constantly going to Victoria’s Secret to pick out sexy lingerie to surprise him.

But recently, we’d fallen into a rut. A “get home from work totally exhausted, change into our sweatpants, order in some food from Seamless, and watch TV on the couch until we fall asleep” kind of rut. The kind of rut where we were only having sex two, maybe three times a week.

So yeah, looking back, maybe our breakup was inevitable. But still the way it happened, so suddenly, took me by surprise.

I remember that it happened on a Monday night, not long after we’d settled down to watch the most recent Game of Thrones episode that Matt, which he had downloaded from some sort of spam-filled pirate site. (Back when we first got together, I had an HBO subscription, but Matt talked me into getting rid of it). I’d tried to avoid spoilers all day, but I’d heard that the episode was pretty dimly lit—with a lot of nighttime battle scenes—so I wasn’t surprised when the picture got a little hazy at times. We just had to really focus on the screen, that was all. Just ignore everything else and keep staring at the screen.

And that episode—wow! I was just enthralled. And I couldn’t wait to watch it again. In fact, I was so stunned by the ending that—after I turned to ask Matt didn’t he think that Arya kicked ass in this episode—it took a whole minute before I realized that he was no longer there.

I finally found him in the bedroom, his sweatpants and underwear around his ankles, stroking his dick as he talked to someone on the phone. He was so wrapped up in his phone call he didn’t even seem to notice me walking into the room. I could only hear his side of the conversation: “Yes… yes… I understand… yes… I will… oh oh YES!” Here he shot a big load of cum right onto the bedroom carpet.

Matt hung up the phone, then finally acknowledged my presence. “I’m moving out,” he said flatly.

“Does… does that mean you’re breaking up with me?” I asked, still trying to process what I was hearing and seeing.

“Yes. I’m not attracted to you anymore,” Matt said as he reached down to wipe off a bit of cum that was dribbling down the head of his dick, then licking the cum off his fingers and slurping it down appreciatively. I wondered if this was his way of getting back at me for never wanting to swallow when we had oral sex.

But then Matt said, “It’s nothing personal. I’m just not attracted to girls anymore. Girls are soft; they can’t satisfy me like a man’s hard body can,” he added, his dick beginning to rise up again as soon as he mentioned men.

“But…“ My head was reeling—we’d been dating for almost a year, and there’d been no signs that Matt was gay or even bi. “But…have you ever even been with another guy?”

“Not yet. But I will. Very soon.” Not even bothering to wipe the cum trails from his crotch, Matt pulled his underwear and sweatpants back on, then grabbed his keys and wallet and headed for the front door.

“Wait! Where are you going? Can’t we talk about this?” I called after him.

“Don’t worry, Carrie. It’s for the best. Just calm down. Maybe you should watch that Game of Thrones episode again,” he suggested as he walked out the door.

He didn’t come back that night, or the next day, or the day after that. I kept texting him, but he didn’t respond. Not until I sent him an angry text saying, “When are you coming back to get your stuff? If I don’t hear back from you I’m taking it all to Goodwill!”

Then he finally texted me back and said, “That’s fine. I don’t need any of that stuff anymore.”

Thank god my girlfriends were so supportive. Becca even came over that night to help me box up Matt’s clothes so I wouldn’t have to keep looking at them.

“You’re better off without him, Carrie!” Becca told me. “You just need to move on with your life, get out there and start dating again. Actually, I know this great guy at work. His name’s Peter and he’s 29 and he’s single and he went to Cornell and he’s really good-looking—I mean, honestly, he makes Matt look like Seth Rogen—and don’t be mad but I told him you’re single and showed him your picture and he wants to take you out for dinner tomorrow… you know, if you’re interested.”

I was reluctant at first, but I decided that Becca was right. I needed to meet new guys if I ever wanted to get over Matt. So I went on the date, and I found that Peter was even better-looking in person. And he was so smart and such a gentleman. Some guys just want to talk all about themselves on a first date, but not Peter. He kept asking me questions and really listening to my answers, looking deep into my eyes as I spoke. I was starting to think that he was really into me, and it started to rebuild some of the self-confidence that was shaken after Matt left me. So I invited Peter back to my place for some “Netflix and chill” time.

I guess I must have been the one who suggested that we watch the latest Game of Thrones episode, but Peter was all for it too. He’d already seen it on Sunday night, but it was so dark on his TV, he didn’t mind watching it again to see what he’d missed the first time. So we snuggled together on the couch under a blanket, and I pressed play, and after that I just started concentrating on the screen so much and got so wrapped up in the episode that I didn’t even look over at Peter once and then when the credits were over and I turned off the episode, I noticed that Peter was gone.

I finally found him in the bathroom, taking a dick pic in front of the mirror. I called out his name, but he didn’t seem to notice; he just kept talking on the phone, not even bothering to tuck his dick back in his pants, instead actually stroking it as he spoke: “Yes, I’ve sent them… yes… I understand… yes… I will… I… oh… oh YES!” he shouted out, shooting a load of cum all over my bathroom sink.

“Oh, hi Carrie,” he said after I cleared my throat. “I didn’t see you there. Anyway, I’ve got to go.”

“What?” I asked, still in shock.

“Yeah. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you’re nice and all, but I’m just not into girls,” he said as he squeezed the last droplets of jizz out of his dick, then sucked on his cum-covered fingers.

“But… Becca said you were straight!”

“I mean, maybe I WAS straight, but that doesn’t really matter now. All I want now is a man’s firm body and hard cock, and I know right where to get it.” Peter licked a few stray droplets of cum off my bathroom mirror, and then he was off.

I was shocked. I mean: what were the odds of this happening twice? In one week?

But then I thought: what would Arya do? Well, my girl Arya wouldn’t be discouraged—she’d go right back out there and try to bag herself a man! So as soon as I cleaned up the rest of Peter’s cum in the bathroom, I got on Tinder, set up a new profile, and started messaging guys. And before the night was through, I had a date for the next night with Tony.

Tony wasn’t really my usual type—he was Italian-American, a fireman, still lived with his parents in Staten Island. But then again, if my “usual type” kept turning out to be gay, maybe it would be better to try dating a more macho, working-class kind of guy. And he WAS cute, with big brown eyes and pillowy lips.

So sure, some of the things he said at dinner made me cringe, especially when he talked about how “guys should act like guys” and “broads should act like broads” and how he wanted a woman who’d cook and clean for him just like his momma did. But still, I invited him back up to my place for some “Netflix and chill” time.

“Netflix and chill,” he smirked, “We both know what THAT means.” So he acted a little put out when I then insisted that we watch the most recent episode of Game of Thrones. But then I got out the blanket and wrapped it around us and then reached over and squeezed his crotch a bit through his jeans, and then finally he smiled and gave in.

It was amazing just how good the episode was. I mean, this was my third or fourth time watching it, and I was still totally enthralled. In fact, I didn’t even mind so much that when I finished watching the episode, I found that I was alone again.

I found Tony in my bedroom. Unsurprisingly, he was naked from the waist down. But I was a little surprised to see that he’d rummaged through my dresser drawers and had found my vibrator, which he was squatting on, moaning in pleasure as he filmed himself with his cell phone. Ignoring my presence, he stopped recording, then picked up his phone and started talking to someone, “Yes… I just sent the video… yes… I understand… I will…”

I didn’t even stay for the whole thing. I could tell that it wasn’t going to work out with me and Tony. So instead I just went back into the living room, got on my phone, and went on Tinder again to find another guy. By the time Tony left, I was already chatting with Raj, and that kind of took some of the sting out of having to go back into my room to wipe Tony’s cum stains off my bedspread and wash his ass juices off my vibrator.

Now Raj, he was a really nice guy. Smart and handsome too. A son of Indian immigrants who was now a doctor doing his residency at Bellevue. I think we hit it off on the date, but he was a little shy. It took a lot of convincing to get him to come back to my apartment.

I kept telling him that he just had to see the latest episode of Game of Thrones, and then he said something I just couldn’t believe. He’d never even seen Game of Thrones. I kept insisting that it was okay, that he’d be able to catch up if he just watched the episode, but Raj was adamant that if he was going to watch Game of Thrones, he wanted to watch from the very start. God, we must have kept arguing about it back and forth for about 15 minutes, before Raj finally told me that I seemed very nice, but he was feeling really tired and he needed to get back home.

After he left, I just felt so upset, so frustrated, so… unfulfilled somehow. I didn’t know why, but this date with Raj left me feeling a lot worse than my bad dates with Tony and Peter had.

For some reason, I just kept thinking of Matt and how we always loved to watch Game of Thrones together, and so I impulsively texted him: “Just had the worst date. Tried to watch the new GOT with him and he just bolted and went home. Thinking of U.”

To my surprise, Matt texted me back 10 minutes later: “U at home?” And 20 minutes later, he was at my front door.

It was amazing how much Matt had changed within less than a week. I didn’t remember him ever looking quite so muscular, plus he’d gotten a short new haircut, and…well, at least when we were dating, Matt would never have walked around at night shirtless, wearing just a pair of skintight spandex camo shorts.

I asked him to come in, but he just shook his head and handed me a little flash drive.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“It’s full of TV shows,” Matt said in a flat, toneless voice. “Next time your dates don’t want to watch Game of Thrones, just let them choose one of these.”

“Um… thanks, Matt. That’s really sweet. You’re really sweet. Are you… are you sure we can’t still make it work?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” he said, his voice still devoid of expression. “I’m not attracted to girls anymore. I only desire my brother recruits and their hard bodies and big cocks.” I could see a bulge growing in his spandex shorts, and I couldn’t help staring; I didn’t remember Matt ever being that big!

“Brother… recruits?” I asked.

“Yes. I must get back. Brother Peter is waiting for me to fuck his hot ass while Brother Tony face-fucks him.”

“Oh… OK. Well… um… don’t be a stranger,” I said. And then he was gone, leaving me feeling so lonely I couldn’t wait to get back on Tinder.

I lined up two more dates over the weekend. Liam was a barista and aspiring novelist with shaggy red hair, sparkling blue eyes, and a cute crooked smile. Aiden was a soulful hunk in his late 30s who owned his own business making bespoke furniture. But when I got them home—wouldn’t you know it, they both turned out to be gay! Just my luck!

I mean, it was happening so often these days it was kind of funny. And at least Aiden had had the decency to lick up all his cum off the kitchen counter after he shot his load and announced he was gay.

I had been worried that there was something wrong with me, something that was like kryptonite to me, where they wouldn’t want to have anything else to do with a woman when they spent time with me. I said as much to Becca when she came over on Friday night for some Chinese food and Game of Thrones. (It’s funny, Becca’s not a huge fan, but she loved the most recent episode SO much, I had to make a copy so that she could take it home with her and rewatch it).

So it was actually a relief when Becca called me on Sunday night and said that the same thing had happened to her this weekend. Twice. Two separate dates came back to her place for some “Netflix and chill” time, and they ended up jerking off, announcing they were gay, and then ghosting on her. One of them even shot his load on the brand new rug she’d brought back from Turkey!

I know this makes me sound like a terrible friend, but just hearing about Becca’s disastrous dates made me feel better about myself. At least I knew it wasn’t me! There must be, just, something in the water here in New York turning guys gay!

Even so, it was a shock running into Matt on the street on Monday morning. Well, I didn’t exactly run into him—it was more like he ran past me. And he wasn’t the only one; there was a whole pack of guys running with him, all shirtless and wearing the same skintight spandex camo shorts.

And as they ran by, I was surprised to realize that Matt wasn’t the only one I recognized; there running next to him was his old college buddy Kevin and his friend Marcus from work. And then… wait a second… was that Peter? And Tony? And bringing up the rear, wasn’t that Liam and Aiden?

Who would have guessed that all those guys knew each other? And were part of the same… gay running club, I guess. I suppose what they said about New York was true: for such a big city, it sure felt like a small town sometimes.

After that, I kept trying to push Matt out of my mind and just focus on the new guys I was messaging on Tinder and going out on dates with every night. (I knew they’d probably turn out to be gay, but that didn’t stop me enjoying the date while it lasted). But it was hard to forget Matt, especially when I kept seeing guys around the city who reminded me of him. In fact, whole groups of guys just wearing those tight spandex camo shorts that Matt liked to wear these days. I’d see them at the park, or at the grocery store, or even fucking in the alley beside my building this one time.

I had to admit it: I missed Matt. So I was secretly overjoyed when he just showed up unexpectedly at my apartment one morning. I took a moment to just stare at him and admire how big his muscles were getting. And what about that massive bulge in his shorts!?

But my joy was shortlived when Matt spoke: “I need the apartment back.”

“What? But you moved out! And the lease is in my name!”

“This apartment is suitable as a base of operations,” he said flatly, “We will move in, and you will move out.”

“Wait a second, Matt! This is my apartment—I love this place! Where do you expect me to live anyway?”

“You will live with your friend Becca.”

“That’s easy for you to say! You know, Matt, you really have some nerve coming in here and…”

As soon as he said that, it was like everything else went out of my head. This silly argument could wait; I just HAD to watch this Game of Thrones episode and I HAD to watch it NOW.

Sure enough, it was another amazing episode. So amazing I knew I just had to go over to Becca’s place immediately and show it to her.

And sure enough, she loved it too. And as we talked about it afterwards and discussed all the strong women we loved in the episode—Arya and Dani and Brienne and all the rest—we started realizing the truth: we just loved women. And we loved each other. I’d only kissed a girl before as a dare at a frat party in college, but kissing Becca just felt so right. And kissing led to… well… all kinds of other stuff. And before the day was through, we were talking about moving in together.

So everything all worked out in the end. And Matt was so helpful getting all my stuff moved out of my old apartment and into the place where I was now living with Becca. He even got all his friends—his “brother recruits” as he called them—to chip in and load and carry the boxes of stuff across town. I tried talking to some of them—to Tony and Pete and Liam and Aiden and Raj and a few of the other guys—to let them know there were no hard feelings on my part, but they just ignored me and carried on with their work.

But even with those guys giving me the cold shoulder, I still hadn’t given up on men. And neither had Becca. I mean, even though our sex life was great, we both agreed it would be hot to spice it up a bit by bringing a guy into the bedroom. So we hit up Craigslist and a bunch of other sites, putting up ads that said, “Two girls seek hot guy for threesome.”

As you can imagine, we got a LOT of responses, so we had to whittle them down to the guys we thought looked the hottest and, of course, the least likely to be gay. So far, we haven’t had much luck. I guess our gaydar was broken or something. Because we’d get these guys who seemed really straight—so straight that they’d be pawing at us, wanting to start the threesome as soon as we got back to the apartment—but then we’d tell them they needed to slow down a little, to do some cuddling and fondling on the couch while we watched TV, and then as soon as the show was over, we’d realize that they were gone and find them in some other room taking dick pics and jerking off and telling us they were gay right after they shot their loads all over our carpet or walls or pillows or wine rack or wherever.

It was a little exhausting, but we still hadn’t given up hope, even if good straight men were increasingly hard to find in this little island of ours. I mean, it seemed like every day you’d see more and more buff shirtless guys running around in packs, wearing those tight little spandex camo shorts that showed off their cute butts and outlined every inch of their massive packages.

And they’d gotten pretty brazen about flaunting their sexuality too. I mean, I had to stop by my old apartment building yesterday to pick up some kitchen stuff I’d left behind, and it was like a non-stop orgy in there. I even had to wait for the elevator because there were too many guys fucking in the stairwells. Guys I never would have thought were gay, too, like in the hallway I passed our super, Mr. Ramirez, who was pounding the ass of our retired neighbor, Mr. Danforth, who in turn was getting his dick sucked by a cute young Italian guy who looked like he could be Tony’s younger brother.

But I guess that was Manhattan for you. People come here to change, to discover themselves. And sometimes, like with me and Becca, they discover that the right person for you has been right under your nose the whole time. So what if straight guys were becoming as rare as unicorns? We still had each other (and our “Netflix and chill” time!)

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