Too much going going going and doing doing doing left me feeling sad, depleted, and exhausted. At 3:30 in the afternoon, I crawled under the safety of the covers, willing the softness of the blankets to work their magic on my frantic mind and sore body.

And, here’s the thing…it took me getting to that point to learn a big lesson. Sometime, we have to give ourselves permission to “not.”

To not do anything, say anything, be anywhere. To not have to engage, or work, or whatever it is that keeps our minds and bodies teetering on the consistent edges of exhaustion. We live in a world that demands constant connection and fast responses. How many of us have sent a text and then tapped our foot impatiently as the seconds and minutes roll by in anticipation of a text back. These responses we wait for have somehow become affirmation of our existence on this planet…the yes, we are here, and yes, we do matter. Do they “like” me, do they “see” me, am I “good enough,” and is what I am saying “worthy?”

Rather than holding our own existence gently in our core being, we farm it out – on social media, in our interactions with people, in the the things we purchase, and in the spaces we work. We are beholden to being there, doing that, meeting this person, showing up here and there and everywhere despite the call of our souls to come back home. Not home in the physical four walls sense, but home in the space that resides in the stillness and quiet deep within. That space I needed to reconnect to under the covers last Friday.

Not doing can feel (and has been labelled) lazy. Not doing conjures up this idea that we are missing out somehow. Not doing suggests an unwillingness to participate – and that, in our society, is just not acceptable. When we give ourselves permission to “not,” we are in fact doing one of the most important things for ourselves…we are giving ourselves a chance to rest, restore, reconnect, rewire. We are giving ourselves a moment to take a deep breath and feel those things that haven’t had a chance to be felt. We are allowing space for processing and integration.

That’s why the practices of restorative yoga and poses like savasana are so important. They give our bodies a moment to recalibrate, to absorb, to surrender, to let go. Meditation itself is the practice of finding stillness and “not.” Not overthinking, not judging, not moving. These are practices that ask us to come home again and again, to recognize when we want to distract in order to avoid, and to experience the feeling of “not” – even for just a brief second.

There is a sweetness and power in giving permission to “not.” A care and respect for body, soul, and mind. A practice we should be undertaking much more often.

I woke up last Friday feeling tired…as in, really tired. The bone-tired that makes it really hard even just to get out of bed. I’d had a week battling insomnia and wasn’t feeling very motivated to do much of anything. My body was telling me to rest, but I didn’t listen. I convinced myself a that a short two-mile run was exactly what I needed. Even as I was lacing up my running shoes, I could feel my eyes wanting to close and the muscle fatigue growing just a bit deeper.

9:30 AM – Head out the door and start a slow jog down my block.

9:31 AM – Have an unsuccessful make-out session with the pavement.

In my exhausted state, I tripped a minute into my run, caught myself with my chin, took a hunk out of my left front tooth, skinned both knees, and bruised my pelvis. I was shocked from the fall and must have made a sound as I hit the dirt because the older gentleman running in front of me (who I am so grateful for!) stopped abruptly, turned around, ran to my side, and between “oh no’s!” kept asking if I was all right. He offered to walk me back to my building and to call someone, but in my embarrassed and hurting state, I told him “Thank you, no,” limped back home, washed myself off, got an appointment with a dentist that afternoon, and did what I should have done in the first place…RESTED.

Here are some things I learned from the experience.

Lesson 1: Embarrassment causes tears before the pain does. I felt foolish and clumsy and awkward. I’ve run the same route for almost a year now and couldn’t believe that the cement under my feet could be that hard (note to self: pavement is HARD!). It was amazing how much more painful my emotional state was versus my physical pain.

Lesson 2: People are awesome. There have been a number of times in my life where I’ve fallen, dropped something, or needed a hand. Sometimes, people won’t stop. They will be embarrassed for you and look away (or point and laugh). The majority of the time – those times that restore my faith in humanity – people stop and check on you. They offer to help you back to your feet, check out your shattered tooth and bruised ego, and offer to call someone if you need them to (even if the number is long-distance and their cell phone plan stinks).

Lesson 3: I am vain! I’d only ever experienced this awareness of just how vain I am once before. When I looked in the mirror after my fall and saw the gap in mouth and the giant swollen bruise on my chin…I started crying harder. Again, embarrassment flooded my body. The first time I felt this way was when I had emergency surgery on my right eye for a detached retina. When they took the gauze off my eye, I was devastated at my appearance. This whole event was a reminder to me of just how jaded I am by my attachment to looks, and not to what truly matters… my soul, my goodness, the light that is within. A good reminder to check myself and a reminder that I am not what is on the outside.

Lesson 4: Get up and try again. I felt nervous going out for another run after Friday’s incident, but on Sunday, I laced up and after 2.5 miles, my stomach finally released its knots and I was able to get in some decent mileage. In short, “try, try again.” Whether it is meditation, yoga, surfing, a work project, being a good partner or friend…we almost always have the opportunity to get out there and give it another go.

Have you had a similar experience? What did you learn?

Namaste, Heather

P.S. My tooth – thanks to some quick work – is just fine (grateful for dentists with skill and open spaces on their calendars) and my body is getting less sore by the day!

No matter what side of the hemisphere you find yourself on, the seasons are changing! Even in climates where seasonal shifts are subtle, our bodies need time to slow and adjust to changing weather, natural light, and nature’s rhythms. Whether we are moving into a period of cooler temperatures and less daylight or warmer days and longer nights, this is a perfect time to tune into what your body – and nature – is asking from you!

Each of the seasons can be related to an element in Chinese medicine:

Fire = Summer

Metal = Autumn

Water = Winter

Wood = Spring

Earth = Late Summer and the transitional time occurring between the seasons

As we are in a period of transition from one season into another, the Earth element is at its most prominent. With this, nature, and our bodies, ask us to pay special attention to our stomach and digestive issues. We may crave different foods as we move from winter into spring and/or summer into autumn. For those of us looking at warmer days, we may begin to crave fresh fruits and vegetables while those entering into the colder months may crave things like stews and roasted root vegetables.

Our bodies may need either more activity or more rest depending on where we are in nature’s cycle. As spring kicks into gear, those of us who have been hibernating throughout the winter months may find ourselves with a surge of energy and a need to get outside to shed layers – literally and figuratively. For those coming off the hot, sultry days of summer, there may be a need for the body to rest, cool down, and restore in order to prepare for the long restful period ahead.

As we meditate and move through our asana practice, we may choose to focus on the Manipura, or Solar Plexus, chakra – a place of guidance and powerful transformation. As the changing seasons can be disruptive to our systems, focusing on Manipura chakra can give us a sense of stability and power that we might feel is lacking. As you meditate, you can breathe into this area of your body (located just above the naval and in toward your spine) and envision bright yellow light filling that space. Select postures that enable you to open and tap into this area with core work (for generating heat) and subtle backbends (to open up that space in the body).

It is also time for us to listen…really listen to what is happening around us. We may feel inclined to hold onto the last days of summer and still tapping into the fire that dominated for the last few months or we may resist the idea of a longer winter with water dominating our ways…but, if we are patient, and we hear what Mother Nature is telling us, we will have the ability to nourish our body, soul, and mind in the way it desires.

What is your body craving during this time of transition? How can you best feed your body, soul, and mind during this time?

As I sit here, watching the leaves turn various shades of gold and red, I am reminded to take a breath and once again, to focus on being present.

It has been a year of incredible shifts and change (thanks multiple crazy full moons and other amazing astrological events!) including career moves, physical moves, relationship moves and everything in between. Dealing with all of this change means my Vata is completely out of whack and I am in some serious need of grounding, quiet and comfort.

My nature is to not sit still for too long. I’ve always believed I thrive on change and adopted a “GO, GO, GO!” attitude from the time I was little. I’ve been in constant states of movement and flux and, as a result, always believed that is the natural order of my life. My philosophy was…adapt and roll with it or get run over.

I am now taking a moment to reconsider the opposite. Yes, it is important to be flexible and go with the flow…especially when a lot of change is occurring all at once; however, it is also important to give yourself time to slow down, recuperate, reassess and sink into these moments of stability (wherever and whenever you can get them).

That is where practicing peace in presence comes in.

I am finding myself with a strong desire to take time with everything I’m doing and not rush headlong into the scrum. I want to savour each bite, linger on walks, stay in my pyjamas and pay closer attention to loved ones. I want to practice being fully present and not be thinking about what is going to happen five minutes, five hours, five days, five years from now. I’m trying to slow down. It’s not easy, but I’m trying!

How do you slow down? How do you take time to savour? How do you remain present in the moment?

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to attend three workshops led by Leslee Watt, a physiotherapist and certified yoga instructor, who journeyed to us from Winnipeg. One of the workshops, titled “The Art and Science of Relaxation,” re-opened my eyes to the impact chronic stress has on our bodies. Leslee shared with us the effects stress has on our DNA, our muscles and our brain chemistry.

It…was…sobering.

As she was sharing, I thought about the last three years of my life. While I absolutely adored the work I was doing, the stress of being away from my spouse, living out of suitcases and constantly being on the road took its toll.

I wasn’t sleeping well, my eating habits were out of whack, I always worried about getting enough exercise and my life was dictated by a schedule I didn’t design. It dawned on me that the majority of us are currently living lives that don’t truly enable us to seek our truth…unless we are willing to make radical changes and find a new way of doing things! However, not all changes need to involve quitting your job, moving to Bali for over a month and becoming a yoga instructor (ahem).

All we need is a little restorative yoga and some peace and quiet…

During the workshop, we explored different restorative poses that can help relieve some of the impacts stress has on the body. Most importantly, it was about finding stillness – mentally, physically and emotionally. One woman sitting next to me in the workshop noted that each day she takes a least five minutes to do absolutely nothing but sit. No radio, no television, no laptop or phone…in short, no distraction. She was smiling saying that this one practice is having a huge impact on her…that she is calmer and more focused.

I’ve tried it out the past two days and I love it!

Five minutes. That’s all you need to bring a little calm into your life.