Everything you wanted to know about posters, but were afraid to ask.

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Attack of the AIDS Harpie

Remember that week in health class when you learned about AIDS? Well, in case your memory fails you, the key points reiterated to me once a year revolved around the two major tenants of no swapping fluids or sharing needles. Good advice to live by, really.

No one, however, prepared me for this:

I thought all I had to fear were drug dealers, sluts, and the sexually irresponsible. Apparently I should also have been on the lookout for needle-winged Harpies, ready to swoop down from the sky, sex me up, and jab me full of HIV. I don’t care how harsh a reality this is, if she’s out there, I should have known about this she-beast in 4th grade, if only to protect myself.

Of course, given the text, she is Russian….and we all know how God feels about Communists. And after Chernobyl, I really wouldn’t be surprised to see this big-breasted wooper terrorizing the Eastern Bloc in all her radiated glory.

Then again, European public health ads are generally known for being edgier and far more artistic than their US counterparts. Take, for example, the awesome poster promoting a syphilis film which hangs above my dining room table, or any of the dangerous creature-themed AIDS posters to come out of France not too many years ago. Far more eye-catching and informative than the text-based posters we hung in subways during the AIDS epidemic. Yes, it may not list symptoms or exactly how one contracts AIDS, but they’re sure to make you seriously consider celibacy.

Sadly, no one wanted Ms. AIDS Harpie at the auction. She’s still available, though, for the not-so-dangerous price of $300.