Brunch

“Yes. A drink. You get the juice and I’ll get my cup. You take the lid off and I’ll pour it in.”

“Ok. I’ll put the lid back on the bottle and put it back in the fridge then, shall I?”

“Ok.”

“Would you like some food with that?”

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. Pause.

“Are you hungry?”

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

“No. Yes. No. I don’t know. Ok.”

“What would you like?”

“Anything. You decide.”

“Spaghetti bolognese?”

“NO, Mummy!”

“So, what would you like?”

“Toast. Less than four slices and more than two. I’ll have a blue plate and an orange plate if there are no green plates left. Blue bread on the blue plate and orange bread on the orange plate. You can put butter or Philadelphia on any of them but not both on the same slice. If you use butter then you have to spread it before you cut the crusts off and give it to me as a single rectangle. If you use Philadelphia then you have to cut the crusts off first and then spread it. Then put another slice on top. But don’t put anything on top of that one. You can cut that sort into any size-shapes you like as long as there are six of them. But the blue plate must have only squares and rectangles on it and the orange plate can only have triangles. If there are any green plates left, I’ll have eight small triangles. Please.”