The American Horror Story: Coven finale aired tonight, and they did, indeed, crown a new Supreme! Who now rules Miss Robichaux’s Academy for Exceptional Young Ladies?

Episode 13 of Season 3 of American Horror Story: Coven, “The Seven Wonders,” was the season finale, though there have been whispers of a potential spinoff series. We bid farewell to a few more young witches tonight. Some got off easy. Others, not so much. There’s nothing quite like rewarding a season of pure joy with a heaping helping of Hell! While the actual challenge of the Seven Wonders seemed like it flew by in a flash, most of the episode focused on the fate of the coven as it heads into a new age of bitchcraft. Here is the Recap and Review of Season 3 Episode 13 of American Horror Story: Coven, “The Seven Wonders”!

Episode 13 opened with the return of the White Witch! Stevie Nicks graced our ears with a performance of Fleetwood Mac’s “Seven Wonders” as the girls of Miss Robichaux’s Academy prepped for the trials ahead. Well, it was more like a throwback to 80’s music videos than the live show we got last time, but still. Madison Montgomery (Emma Roberts) magically ignited the candles that illuminated her bubble bath, Misty Day (Lily Rabe) tended to her enchanted plants, Zoe (Taissa Farmiga) levitated her bed, and Queenie (Gabourey Sidibe) prayed to her altar of all things Nan! Before we knew it, Stevie was wishing the girls luck and bidding us adieu. Myrtle Snow (Frances Conroy) orchestrated a wonderful last supper of sorts, complete with caviar, champagne, and an inspirational quote from the Bible thanks to Cordelia (Sarah Paulson). Evil Joan would be proud. Remember Joan? Neither do I.

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Honestly, the opening scenes of the finale of AHS: Coven had me slightly concerned in that it seemed like the show absolutely flew through the challenges at hand before the opening credits could even roll off the screen. First, here are the Seven Wonders for those who lost track: Telekinesis, Pyrokinesis, Divination, Concilium, Vitalum Vitalis, Decension, and Transmutation. For all of us boring muggles; mentally moving things, fire starting, spiritual vision, mind control, resurrection, venturing to Hell and back, and teleportation. (Yes, I copied and pasted that from last week’s recap.) The telekinesis portion, in which the girls drew a candlestick across the table, served as a sufficient bitchy taunting segment that eventually led to a more physically assaulting second act, Concilium. The mind control started off playfully catty with Misty forcing Queenie to bitch-slap herself several times, and Queenie subsequently retaliating by coercing Misty to yank her own hair. This was all nothing compared to Madison’s decision to compel Kyle to kiss her, followed by a super sexual bootlicking moment that drove Zoe to the point of rage. Before we knew it, Kyle was then kissing Zoe. Though, I have to admit that I kind of thought of it as Zoe tonguing the residual stuff of Madison’s boot. Sorry, Zoe. If it makes you feel any better, Madison sure seemed infuriated, and eventually, she pressured Kyle in one final attack to strangle Zoe. Cordelia intervened, and the games continued.

My first real gripe with the finale of American Horror Story: Coven came next. I’m all for a little sadistic torture at Madison’s hand or some consequential returned aggression from any of her victims, but I thought challenge #3, Decension, got seriously heavy. It came time or the girls to travel to Hell and back. Should they not return by the time the sun rose in the morning, they’d die. Queenie ventured to the chicken shack and home again in a flash. Been there, done that. Madison, forced to endure the role of Liesl in The Sound of Music: Live!, finally learned the true meaning of fear and pain. Lastly, Zoe awoke in a panic, having suffered through countless breakups with Kyle. Hell-Kyle doesn’t love Zoe, it seems. Zoe, if that’s what Hell is for you… Madison was in Sound of Music: Live! Crown the starlet, already. What happened next was truly startling. Misty’s Hell was centered on a science lab dissection of frogs. The classic middle school project was too much for Misty to handle as the kindhearted gem that she is, and before we knew it, she was trapped in a horrible loop of reviving frogs only to find her awful teacher forcing her to kill them once again. Cordelia, truly concerned that Misty wouldn’t make it back, began to whisper her home to reality. Obviously, Misty had failed the task, but by the time the sun rose, she’d turned into nothing but dust. Hence, we have my first gripe. Really, American Horror Story? What did Misty Day do to deserve an eternity in science lab Hell? Nobody even deserves four years of that nonsense. We all know what that’s like! I’m all for killing off folks on horror television shows, but that? And to simply have the remaining three girls play Transmutation tag in the scene that followed to blow off some steam? Misty Day, you deserved better. You were taken from this place of being this special swamp witch, dragged into this coven, relegated to a regular, and then sent to Hell. Not in our hearts, you’re not. Stevie Nicks be with you.

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Transmutation tag did seem like a blast, as the girls flashed around Miss Robichaux’s Academy as both a welcome break and means of proving that they had the ability to teleport. It’s all fun and games until someone accidentally impales herself on the spikes of the gate! Poor Zoe fell next, in a shocking turn of events. In the greenhouse, Queenie stood over her friend’s corpse in an effort to whisper her back to life via the gift of Vitalum Vitalis, but she failed. Thus, Queenie was also not the Supreme. This, I did not quite understand. We’ve seen Queenie do this before. I wasn’t aware that these witches could lose their abilities under pressure. Madison, Zoe’s only hope, refused to participate, crowning herself the new Supreme by default. Delia and Myrtle, refusing to acknowledge her as so, were subsequently surprised to watch Madison squash a buzzing fly before zapping it back to life in a flash. She’d completed the task, and yet Zoe still remained dead.

Because Madison refused to return Zoe to the realm of the living in an effort to minimize the threat that one last challenger would bring, Delia and Myrtle mourned the coven in the parlor. At this point, however, Myrtle became inspired by Delia’s absolute dedication to the group, realizing that with Fiona (Jessica Lange) out of the picture, there was no reason for her daughter to suffer and doubt. Delia could lose the power of the coven to Madison or compete. In no time, the girls were gathered and Delia began to crush the challenges at hand, eventually leaving all but one. Neither Madison nor Delia had conquered the Divination task; the test of using stones to reveal that which remains hidden. Delia quite easily deciphered the location of a previous Supreme’s token, a hidden broach that Queenie retrieved for her. Madison, on the other hand, failed.

Absolutely enraged, Madison quit the coven in a huff and threatened to expose the entire truth to TMZ once she returned to the world of the “normal” people, Hollywood. Upstairs, movie star tearfully packed her bags, disappointed, only to find herself at the mercy of Kyle. Kyle watched Madison simply leave Zoe in that “dark place” they both knew all too well. Madison, who attempted to play the love card in an effort to win over Kyle’s approval, failed… at acting. Kyle strangled her to death, leaving Spalding (Denis O’Hare) the duty of burying her corpse. She’d already packed her things, anyway, so nobody would be any wiser. I guess we’re supposed to assume that Madison was so surprised by Kyle’s attack that she forgot to use any magic rip him to pieces with a single blink, but alas. Eh, this might not be a popular opinion, but I was a little upset here as well. I really wanted all of these girls to make it out of the finale, for better or worse. Madison was a total snake, but we’d seen enough of her private emotional side to know that she was truly a tortured soul, and we know that she did have some sort of a connection to Kyle post-death. Plus, what happened next was most definitely inspired by her plan of exposure. As this all transpired, Delia breathed new life into Zoe, returning her to the coven.

Delia, the new Supreme, became beauty and health personified. Her eyes restored to their normal form, her hair radiated light, and her skin began to glow. Before we knew it, she was speaking to the press, revealing the truth behind Miss Robichaux’s Academy and inviting all those potential young witches at home watching to seek the protection of the coven. Zoe and Queenie, who’d proven themselves, earned their places on the council, and Myrtle Snow simply stood by with pride. Wasn’t this scene reminiscent of the finale of American Horror Story: Asylum? Lana Winters lives!

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In the end, however, Myrtle Snow is not one to be snuffed out or to merely fade away into death. Having reached her destiny in helping to see Cordelia to the throne, Myrtle made one last sacrifice. Having murdered the last two council members in cold blood, she demanded her own execution as a means of purging the coven of any leftover rot. Cordelia, who adamantly refused to begin with, could not deny Auntie Myrtle her final wish to eliminate any potential for a coven “Watergate.” Myrtle’s second burning at the stake was quite different from the first. From her ensemble, a flowing red dress and designer sunglasses, to the entire vibe, it all seemed like more of a tearful positive sendoff. Myrtle Snow’s final word…

Balenciaga!

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While it seemed all of the coven’s business had been handled, and Queenie and Zoe stood at Delia’s side with pride, there was actually one more task to take care of. As droves of young girls arrived outside of the school in the days to come, lining the blocks of New Orleans as they waited, Cordelia Goode confronted her dying mother in the parlor. That’s right, everybody. Fiona Goode made her not-so-grand return to Miss Robichaux’s Academy after all. Crippled immensely by the cancer following Delia’s rise to power, Fiona was on her last leg. She’d simply planted false memories in the Axeman’s (Danny Huston) head during the penultimate episode. There was no actual murder, only a plan to let the next Supreme rise so that Fiona could strike her dead. This mere mortal sat beside her daughter now, pleading for a merciful death. Cordelia was always a reminder of her own disgusting mortality. As Delia grew, Fiona grew older. As Delia rose to power, Fiona grew weak and frail. Did Fiona love Delia in her own way? I think the following scene proved that somewhat, but first, Cordelia held her mother and walked her through the process of facing the fear of death as a human being. Fiona’s final experience was her first human one.

And welcome to Hell! Fiona couldn’t simply get off that easily. Fiona Goode’s Hell, designed by Papa Legba, of course, was the promise she’d made to the Axeman. That tiny southern farmhouse with the friend catfish and the porch in the summertime sure didn’t look so cute to Fiona now that eternity would be spent there. Did the Axeman die and go to Heaven? It sure seemed that way. Fiona’s final scene on American Horror Story: Coven was a dance with her lover as Papa Lega watched on laughing. In that moment, all she wanted was her daughter.

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It was time for American Horror Story: Coven to come to a close, everybody! To end the recap, Episode 13 of AHS Season 3 ended with Delia, Queenie and Zoe at her opposite sides, welcoming dozens of new witches into the next chapter in the history of the coven.

My final thoughts: I think when all is said and done, I enjoyed American Horror Story: Coven. I think the season premiere gave me high hopes that Coven would happen on a larger scale than it actually did occur on, but I was happy that the characters were exciting. New Orleans is an amazing, one of a kind setting, though, and besides the very start, we saw way too little of it. Gabourey Sidibe and Emma Roberts were great additions to the young cast, and I hope they both return in some capacity. Say what you will about Madison Montgomery and Queenie, but they were totally entertaining. We didn’t see Kathy Bates of Angela Bassett this week, but they’re legends. The importance of their presence goes without saying. Also, Danny Huston was fantastic. As I previously stated, I think Misty Day deserved way better than her fate, and I kind of wish Fiona had made just a tad more progress. Also, how does someone without a soul go to Hell? Did Delia help her grow a soul in that final moment, their first real hug?

What did you think of the finale of American Horror Story: Coven, Episode 13 of Season 3, “The Seven Wonders”? Are you happy with the new Supreme? Did you also feel terrible for Misty Day? Did Madison get what was coming to her? What about Fiona?

Thanks for reading my Recap and Review of American Horror Story: Coven, Episode 13 of Season 3, “The Seven Wonders”!