Bill Plaschke’s begging-Brand video: He’s a star! (And Brand, too)

Let’s be clear: Bill Plaschke is an old and trusted former co-worker of mine at the LA Times, and he’s better, more prolific, more tuned in, richer, smarter, richer, more-heralded, more deserving, richer and better than me.

Always has been, always will be on all of that. Especially the richer thing. I will be cast down by the Grand Pooh-Bahs of American Sports Journalism for even mentioning this, but oh well, I think that happened about 10 years ago anyway.

If Bill’s doing something, it’s usually smart and award-winning. So whadda I know?

And let’s be more clear: I am not immune from doing silly things on silly mediums and the only comparison between Plaschke and me in such endeavors is that he does his silly performances mostly on ESPN, and even the companies that have been or are about to be decimated by ESPN have very little interest in my silliness.

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But… maybe it’s to my eternal discredit… I promise you, I will never do a beg-a-player video like Plaschke has just done for the LA Times site and I find it amazing that BP decided to do it himself, unless he was pushed out there under immediate Clipper threat of being doused by Donald T. Sterling’s fourth martini.

I think I can link to the actual videoon the LA Times site. Hope that works. I’m always trying to shuffle more viewers to my old paper, aren’t I? (Shh, they don’t know about this site. They think I’m still employed there is my guess.)

I just saw it on LATimes.com for myself. On the one-minute video, my pal BP stares into the camera and begs Elton Brand to stay with the Clippers. Begs. Pleads. This is the sort of sportswriter energy and angst I would normally assign to getting that first-class upgrade on United… but oh well.

I would not normally dial you over to such a funny little thing, but this is the end of a long lull period in the Warriors/Clippers/Baron/Brand melodrama, so I figured I could toss this up to fill some time.

Yep, I’m a little bored, too.

So… The video is actually quite funny. Bill is a funny guy. I guess the idea was to amplify his recent column arguing that Brand can’t renege on his tacit agreement to join Baron on the Clippers or else Brand would look like just another selfish player.

Not a bad argument. I happen to think that Brand will remain true to his word and please Plaschke enormously, but I also believe Brand can do whatever he wants–it’s the friggin’ Clippers, not the Celtics. Brand has to protect himself against future delipidation of the franchise the same way Baron protected himself from the Warriors by jumping for the 5-year, $65-million deal.

And I don’t think Brand gives a whit about any of it–kind of think Brand is going to do whatever’s best for Brand, ya know?–but if the LA Times is going for this beg-a-player video thing, there are all kinds of possibilities.

I mean, I guess I’m already behind the times. Maybe the Merc Powers have wanted me to do a video begging Baron Davis to stay with the Warriors (that would’ve sent BD away guaranteed) or for Peter Magowan to re-sign Barry Bonds one last time or for John and Jed York to go ahead and do whatever it is they would like with Santa Clara’s tax base, pretty please.

But I think I’ll recuse myself from such video beggery. Please don’t tell the LA Times I said this, however. They’ll fire me for sure if they remember who I am.

Tim Kawakami

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Elton will go for the money. I’m surprised a cynical guy like Timmy would think otherwise!

Devil’s Advocate

If I were Elton and I saw that: I would leave town as quick as I could.
Scary.

geoff leprosy

whats more scary, bill plasktchke’s lisp or your wig timmmmy

stlkr

WTF! was that Bill P.? You think E. Brand can win a ship w/ Barron? He played all 82 last year & still could not get us in..

stlkr

I heard Baron trimed his beard so Timmy can have a little more on top.. He want that soul glow look!!!

Alex P

What amazing to me is how Bill Plaschke has somehow neglected to mention (or care about) how Baron reneged on his commitment not to opt out of his contract with the W’s. Yet, he makes it a point to say how if Elton decides to go with the W’s offer, then he’s not sticking to his word–that would make Elton a member of the Evil Empire, or something. But, it’s okay for the Clippers to GET someone who did just that? Okay, I get it. It’s alright to receive good players with sketchy behind the scenes deals in place before the appropriate time, but it’s not okay to lose a player to a team who’s willing to pay more.
I understand.
Bill Plaschke is a genius in much the same way that Monta Ellis is a natural point guard.

E

6. Alex P is right, how can someone blast Brand for considering this deal (which was obviously without integrity to begin with) all the while the W’s have played it straight.

I get what Baron did, out of all of us, who wouldn’t go where they were really desired by ownership in our own jobs, don’t blast him, let’s just go get a replacement employee now.

If Brand says no, then is Josh Smith the player we want?

Golden Buddha

Dang, I didn’t think there was such as a thing as a slow news day in LA. But Billy P’s got too much time on his hands and seriously over-rates the the effectiveness of the tandem of Baron “If I keep shooting enough of these outside shots, I know I’ll make one” Davis and Elton John-Brand. Except at movie making.

john

Too bad Plaschke didn’t work for the Cleveland Plain Dealer a few years ago. He would have kept Boozer from jumping to Utah!

Golden Buddha

Oh and some advice for teams if Baron and Brand do play together. On defense,”Pack it in,” “Clog the lanes.” Take away Elton’s inside game and let Baron hoist all the outside shots he wants(there will be plenty hoisted, trust me on this). On offense, if you’ve got a quick point guard, have him take the ball right at Baron, this will help wear Elton(who is a shot-blocker) down because he’ll be tired from having to come off his man time after time to stop Baron’s man from getting to the rim after he has blown by Baron(and probably “caveman” too). My Clips prediction for the season. 7th or 8th seed. One and done in playoffs. Not even the best team in LA this year. And, a new coach next year. Remember, you read it here first.

Sid

If the Clippers supported that pathetic endorsement, I wouldn’t be surprised. It jives perfectly with their reputation of a loser NBA organization. BTW, BP – complete and utter loser. He may be richer but we got class up here.

poopoosah

Wow if that guy is doing this video for Elton Brand, just imagine what he’s capable of doing for KOBE!!!

creepy

poopoosah

hey Tim Kagasawua, how close is Brand of signing with the Dubs???

I would like some breaking news by tomorrow morning. I am tired of waiting for his desition.

Maybe by the time Fitz and Brooks come on the air live monday morning there will be an answer.

Mano de Nada

The most compelling reason for Brand to leave so far (well that and $20 million a year).

wfan1

Brand is hoping that the new cap supposedly be announced on Wed will allow the Clips to up their offer. So no news til Wed or Thursday.

It is obvious Brand don’t wan to come to Oaktown so Mully better has plan C or D in place.

tampering

what a bunch of bs. brand isn’t leaving la, and he never was. i’m convinced he had a handshake deal with the clips. this is a facade to make this situation look a bit less like tampering. look, if brand talks to baron while they are under contract, that’s tampering. according to larry coon, if a “player or team directly or indirectly entices, induces or persuades anybody (player, general manager, etc.) who is under contract with another team to negotiate for their services” it’s tampering. it’s a pretty low bar.

the clips need plausible deniability right now, and brand ‘considering’ this deal is part of the game. go look what stern did to the t-wolves with joe smith. voided his contract, pulled his bird rights, took away two (originally five) first round picks, and fined the wolves $3.5 mil.

you think baron and brand knew the rules. hell no. you think they aren’t sh*tting bricks right now. how about voiding baron’s agreement, stripping brand’s bird rights, taking a couple picks, and hitting them for $5-10 mil.

in the end, brand stays, and signs a slightly larger contract then originally agreed so it looks like the clips negotiated. he tells the press how much he loves la. stern can’t prove crap. W’s get screwed again.

who, me. bitter?

Numbers Guy

I don’t think Brand is waiting for LA to up their offer, as much as he is waiting to find out how much it actually is. Until the cap is set, no one (including the Clippers and Brand) have any idea how much LA has to offer him, and how it compares to GS’s offer. They are just working from rough estimates right now, and if the cap goes up or down considerably from the expected 58.5M, it could change the dynamics for both teams.

Son of Ahmed

Whether the cap goes up or down, can’t BOTH teams adjust accordingly making the difference the same?

Bundy

Bill Plaschke is better than Tim Kawakami right now… wait that’s a lie, they are both boners.

stantonsasaki

Plaschke is a joke. Can’t wait to see what he will do when Kobe is ready to split.

For $20M, Elton can buy himself a pretty sick jet and commute from LA everyday…

wfan1

just wondering tonite if the NBA and Sterno are thinking about slapping the Clips with colusion penalty. Remember the NBA fined the Wolves after they and Joe Smith screwing around with the caps.

If Brand turns down an extra 20mils then it can’t go unnoticed by the commish. Maybe the NBA is watching the Clips and Brand…..Lets hope so.

I keep hearing people mention Josh Smith who seams to be a 6’9 offensive minded 235 pound non-post player who like to shoot three pointers but then the same people are trying to trade Al Harrington a 6’9 245 pound non-post player who likes to shoot threes. Does 6’9 offensive minded 235 pound non-post player who like to shoot three pointers sound like a solution to stop boozer, duncan, brand, stadoumire, oden, Yao, Alderage, Gasol, Shaq, Dirk, Okur….? Is the idea to get better or remain with the status quo?

colonel

Gman – I think the W’s fear right now is getting a lot worse next season without BD. Not much for a fan to get excited about.

TK – matt steinmetz wrote the seeds of BD’s discontent may have been sown (or watered) by the 5 day mini-camp and fiasco around cwebb’s arrival.
BD could not have been impressed by the w’s effort to set up for the playoffs. Nor the draft. Mullin did not go out and get another playmaker in either case. BW, Randolph will start to be significant contributors about the time the contract Mullin offered BD would be running out. .. If they develop.

Is it possible BD figured w’s had no better shot at championship than clippers? At least BD is closer to home in LA and it will be easier for him to start on his next career. We were all worried about the window with Nellie, but BD’s clock ticks at the same speed.

If the W’s steadfastly refuse to go into luxury tax territory, they are looking at a future with second-tier FAs and low lottery picks. Unless Mullin can be creative enough to get a trade counterparty to pick up the tax bill. (good luck with that)

What will Cohan do? (a) Accept (low cost) mediocrity? (b) Fire Mullin? (c) Sell the team? Will W’s fans continue to support a medicore-to-poor product? I have to think either Mullin is on the hot seat this offseason, or Cohan’s choice is (a).

USCMike

Hey, did you see the extended version of the Plaschke’s Begging Brand to Stay video? It’s ten minutes of BP stroking EB and telling him how soft the media is in LA and how the Clips never get criticized in LA because no one ever pays attention to them since they are on page 2. Also, if he takes the Warrior’s offer, he has to deal with Bay Area meanies like Tim Kawakami.

Plaschke also begged Kawakami to come back to the LA Times, by comparing him to Derek Fisher. Remember when DF left for the big bucks in Utah, only to come back home and play for less with the Lakers? BP will even give up some of his salary to fit you in under the cap. You’ll get reunited with the likes of Baron Davis and Ned Colletti.

Great post, colonel. Nice job of putting BD’s point of view out there. Why should BD commit to the Dubs when they weren’t going to commit to him (and they were wise not to)?

The front office has made some mistakes as you point out, but they have also made some good decisions. They reversed course on bad signings and have built a very good young core while positioning themselves financially to invest in players to build on it.

To answer your question, I hope the answer is C because A has been the reality for the last dozen or so years. If things don’t go well this off season, you never know what can happen. The reports seem to indicate that Cohan is under financial turmoil.

BP is a brown noser

Come on, are you freakin kidding me? Is Bill Placenta seriously comparing signing BD to last year’s Boston trade for KG? If I was KG I would be pretty damn insulted… If I were KG I’d phone up BD and tell him: “the closest you’ll ever get to the NBA finals was that Zohan commercial you did.”
We all know the Clips aren’t going anywhere deep in the playoffs even with BD… yah they might have a decent starting 5 now that they have a point guard, but who’s coming off their bench to back Baron up, or even worse, when BD decides not to play all 82 games this year? Dan Dickau? Please. (my prediction, 7th seed at BEST and out a-la Nuggets style this year). Championships are built around talent and depth. Talent the clips may have now with EB and BD (but the lose Maggette and may others because of it)… but depth? Would the Celtics have won if it weren’t for bench players like Posey, House, Davis, Cassell, and of course Powe (love that guy-anyone else think he looks like a bigger Jrich?).
Is Brand seriously turns down 20 mil to play with BD and they are anything less than a .500 team, he will look and feel like the NBA’s biggest jack@$$… it’ll be even funnier when the clips sink so far into mediocrity that the clips move to Seattle cuz the Sterlings sank so much money into those two they are forced to relocate to a city that’ll pay more attention to them…
Maybe Baron and Elton are trying to become the NBA version of Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie…

gary

I don’t think we’ll get EB or any useful FA. When was the last time this happened?

Let’s all keep an eye on DeMarcus Nelson. He signed with the Ws to play in LV and SLC.

Defensive player of the year in the ACC. A combo guard. From Elk Grove (a local product… not LA product). Maybe the Ws get some minutes from him at PG. He’s not a kid… 4 years at Duke. Stats aren’t all that great, however. But he’s quick and can run. Looks a little like a young BD, w/o the attitude.

Colonel, since when do the Baron’s seeds of discontent need watering to grow? They seem to eventually sprout wherever he is at, regardless of their surroundings and upkeep.

Wilson

Almost impossible that Brand would come to the Warriors. I think the Clippers value Brand a lot more than Baron. If Brand refused to verbally commit to giving up the $20M, the Clippers would simply not renounce their restricted rights to him, and would re-sign him at max or close to it. So I don’t think Brand will be coming here, but if Brand got greedy, it could screw up the Baron deal, and that would have to be renegotiated, which could get very interesting.

SignBrand

Tim, quick, get with your multimedia folks and produce a video begging Brand to come to the Warriors.

Tell them there’s $20M more here, less smog, a better team (if he joins), $20M more, a Warriors employee on the radio daily to kiss his ass, $20M more, no TJ Simers to bring down his teammates, $20M more, a young nucleus of talent, $20M more, and then the final plea can be that he’ll make $20M more here.

Also, if a media outlet offered Plaschke a salary 30 percent above an LA Times offer, would he pass on it because of loyalty? Yeah right. Playing the loyalty card in pro sports is sooooooo weak.

Loyalty is what the underpaid lean on to maintain their pride when better offers don’t roll in.

http://Yahoo! PeteyB

Hey Timmy,
Since your devoted readers all know you’re pretty darn good at double dog daring Baron Davis to opt out of the last year of his lucrative deal, let’s see your video convincing Brand to sign with the W’s! One up Bill P! C’mon, go for it! LOL!!!

It could go something like this… “Hi, My name is Timmy K. Here’s some reasons why you, Elton Brand, need to sign with the W’s now. (1) You say you want to win an NBA championship? The W’s won an NBA Championship in 1975 – I know, I know, you weren’t even born yet, but how many championships have the Clips won? (2) You’ll always be number 2 on the Clippers. Who ever wants to be known as the 2nd best movie producer on his own NBA team or the 2nd best team in their own city? (3) Regarding playing time, Nellie will probably play you all game long all season long – because likes Vets and he’s getting older and more stubborn. (4) You have great teammates on the W’s – Stephen Jackson has proven with his past actions that he’s got your back should any scuffle with unruly fans arise – both in and out of the stripclub! (5) And lastly, in the spirit of T.O’s press secretary during T.O.’s bout with attempted suicide – I can think of $20,000,000.00 reasons why you’ll be happier here at Golden State than in Clipperland!”