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5/20/2013

Baby Learning Part 2

Time for another baby learning post.

1. Baby sleep.
It's 3 a.m. and I wake. I normally don't wake up unless she cries. No sound is heard but I am up with an urge to check the baby. I don't take this to mean anything as it's my every waking moment's reaction. And there she is, sleeping soundly... on her tummy!!!!
I immediately turn her and go back to bed, but back to sleep?
The impression hits me hard. A coworker's 7 month-old niece died the morning before.
I'm shaking so hard my husband awakes.
"Go to sleep," he tells me after I tell him of Emmalee's new sleeping position.
"What if I go to sleep to wake up and find that she's gone?" I say through sobs that might as well wake her up.
"What does the Word say," he encourages, " In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord,...- What? How does the verse end?-Make me dwell in safety."
Thank God for good husbands who recite the Word to you.
Saturday afternoon I found her napping on her tummy again with her face pressed against the bumper.

So here are the lessons I've learned this past days:
1. It is better to be safe than sorry. If the American Academy of Pediatrics is telling you to put the baby on the crib without sheets, comforters, crib bumpers, and stuffed animals, go ahead and obey!
Many parents will tell you their kids used all of the above mentioned and are just fine. Well, in one of the mommy forums I was researching what to do with Emmalee's crazy sleeping movements (she moves all around the crib) I read a comment from a mom that pretty much spoke from my heart:

Quoting Ashley:I know those experts now say that crib bumpers are dangerous and babies can get their heads stuck underneath them. I don't see how that can happen. I used a crib bumper for both of my children the day I brought them home. They do move around a lot and sometimes fall asleep with their faces pressed up against the crib bars... not comfy!! I would say you are safe to use it now.

My lil guy moved around alot as well once he figured out how to turn over both ways...and I did have bumpers in the crib and he did end up with his face pressed into the bars anyway. I found him like that -doing a routine check on him after putting him to sleep. His little body all weirdly angled his head pushed way back his face pressed deeply into the cushion that shouldn't have been there had I listened to experts. I'm just wondering what you would prefer -your child to be a little uncomfortable because of non-cushioned bars, or would you prefer to find your little princess like that face in the cushion all comfy and still....

Well, needless to say, Emmalee's crib has been bared to only the fitted crib sheet. She sleeps with thick pijamas that do the job of keeping her warm through the night.
I also read this article that I related alot with. I would take sleepless nights with a waking baby any day if it means she is safe!

While researching baby sleep I also learned a couple of new lessons. Take in mind that baby sleep is a very controversial subject as every expert has a different approach and all of them contradict each other. It makes a mommy go cuckoo bananas.
But I found these new lessons interesting:
1. Encouraging a baby to sleep too deeply, too soon, may not be in the best survival or developmental interest of the baby.
Nightwaking has survival benefits. In the first few months, babies' needs are the highest, but their ability to communicate their needs is the lowest. Suppose a baby slept deeply most of the night. Some basic needs would go unfulfilled. Tiny babies have tiny tummies, and mother's milk is digested very rapidly. If a baby's stimulus for hunger could not easily arouse her, this would not be good for baby's survival. If baby's nose was stuffed and she could not breathe, or was cold and needed warmth, and her sleep state was so deep that she could not communicate her needs, her survival would be jeopardized

2.An important fact for you to remember is that your baby's sleep habits are more a reflection of your baby's temperament rather than your style of nighttime parenting.
And keep in mind that other parents usually exaggerate how long their baby sleeps, as if this were a badge of good parenting, which it isn't. It's not your fault baby wakes up.

This last comment brings me to baby learning part 2 of this post:

2. Parenting badges
Lets face it, we want them! We want that nicely behaved kid that is a delight to be around. We want those kids who sit at the table and mind their manners. We want that A student. So lets make two things clear: these are traits of older children, not babies, and these are achieved by nurture and not nature.
But parents take pride in their babies development. A mother boasts her baby boy learned to walk at nine months. The other one boasts of her baby girl speaking her first words at eight months auguring signs of genius.
Research actually shows that giving formal education to your children too early is actually hindering their ability to process information and hinder their creativity and curiosity. (More of this in the future)
Babies who were shown how to walk too early have shown deformations on feet, back, and/or legs.
Emmalee is sleeping through the night. It has given me a sense of accomplishment (after all, babywise did promise results if I was diligent).
This is no badge. It doesn't mean I'll be that lucky with the next baby. It doesn't mean I have a better parenting style than parents with babies still waking up during the night at nine months-old.
Lets learn to kick back and enjoy watching those little ones. Lets learn from these early stages of motherhood not to boast and not to compare and above all, not to hurry those little ones.
Emmalee looks so cute when she is sitting on her own pulling on her feet. I want to bathe the dogs really well to have them near her. I can't wait to see her pull their legs and ears!
It's all about enjoying!

I'm excited to be posting soon what I learn of feeding her solids!!! She starts next month!

2 comments:

I so love the verse that you have mentioned above. I believe that being a parent and most specially a mother is a very big task. You have to make sure that your husband and your child have the best care and support that they should have and I am happy for you, because i can tell that your husband cares for you so much. It is normal that you are very concern with Emmalee since she is still so fragile and small. Gd bless you always! Enjoy everyday you spend with Emmalee. - www.vacationbabyrental.com

I have a son and I saw that to take care a baby is not easy. They change our life :). We can't sleep or sleep in the day and wake up in the night. We can't do what we like....But I feel happy when see they lauch :). Hope it is true with you.