Think of a boss, venture capitalist, potential employer, or even a teacher.

Many of us find ourselves in positions of low influence. Maybe we’re seeking funding, or guidance, or advice, or engagement. Thus, by default we’re surrounded by people who have power over us.

We seek, grasp, and claw to get attention, and to attract those with power over us. So how can we become more attractive to these people, and thus achieve our goals and dreams?

Here are compelling ways to become more attractive to those who are (truly) powerful:

Instead of looking inward, look outward.

When we need things from people, we obsess over how they can help us. Shifting your energy outside of yourself is a powerful first step. Start with how you can help those who have influence in your world, and begin your interaction with them that way. Maybe you can write a blog post explaining how you can help them, and then you email them the blog post.

Cultivate your own self worth/confidence.

Confident people attract other confident people. Here’s the rub, you can’t fake confidence. No matter how much we think we can fib, our vocal qualities and facial expressions give us away. So seek small wins to build your self confidence. Cultivate healthful habits and move toward your goals. Even the smallest step forward will help.

Exude warmth in every interaction.

When speaking with someone, stop nodding. Instead, hold their gaze. Don’t stare them down, but resist the urge to bounce your head up and down while they’re speaking. They’ll feel rushed and uncomfortable.

Don’t seek power over other human beings.

When you’re given responsibility handle it with care. Manage your team with empathy, and take the feelings of others into consideration for every decision.

Give your full attention to those you speak with.

Listen intently to everyone you engage with. Don’t interrupt. When asked a question, consider your answer, pause and then offer a thoughtful response.

Don’t take it personally.

Deflect negative talk and roll with the punches. Even go so far as offering some light, self-deprecating humor when in a pinch.

Conduct yourself with integrity.

Define which values drive your life. Understand what’s important so you can create an internal barometer. Surround yourself with those who have the same values.