The Awareness Center closed. We operated from April 30, 1999 - April 30, 2014. This site is being provided for educational & historical purposes.
We were the international Jewish Coalition Against Sexual Abuse/Assault (JCASA); and were dedicated to ending sexual violence in Jewish communities globally. We did our best to operate as the make a wish foundation for Jewish survivors of sex crimes. In the past we offered a clearinghouse of information, resources, support and advocacy.

Friday, April 08, 1994

Important Reminder: When reviewing
this list it is important to remember that the information provided should
not be used as the soul determiner of childhood sexual abuse. This list only
provides the reader with a list of some common Coping Mechanisms that are
used by many adult survivors of childhood sexual abuse. It is also important
to remember that coping mechanisms are learned behavioral patterns used to
cope. They are not necessarily all "good" or "bad". Many individuals have
used their abuse learned coping mechanisms to benefit them professionally
and in other personal situations.

1. Minimizing abuse history/herstory and actions
of offender(s).

2. Rationalization of one's victimization. "Oh,
he/she just didn't know any better. He/She was also abused as a child".

3. Denial is more comfortable for both a child
and adult survivor to pretend the abuse never occurred, than face the
emotional/psychological pain of the violation.

4. Repression/Forgetting. One's body's way of
denying victimization

5.
Splitting. Seeing
the world in terms of black and white (no shades of gray). Common in survivors
when the behavior of the offender was either abusive or loving (no
middle).

6. Lack of Integration. On the inside feeling
you are bad/evil. On the outside being a super achiever. Developing a "false
self".

7.
Out of body
experience(s) during the abuse. Feeling that one watched the abuse
occurring to one's body.

8. Control Issues. The more chaotic family life
in childhood, the stronger control issues are an issue.

9.
Dissociation/Spacing
Out. Everyone does this at times; the difference is degree and frequency.
Example of normal dissociation: Driving a car and realizing you are farther
along then you believed.

11. Workaholism/Business. Staying busy is one
way of avoiding feelings.

12. Escape/Running away. Passive ways include
reading books, sleeping and watching television. It's important to remember
fantasies can be the source of a rich creative life and can be vital to
healing.

13.
Psychiatric
Hospitalizations. Can be used as a respite from intense feelings
and/or flashbacks.

17.
Addictions
are common ways of coping with the pain of sexual abuse. They are usually
self - defeating and self - destructive (drugs,
food, gambling,
sex . . . ).

18. Lying. When children are told not to tell
anyone, the offenders are teaching children to lie. Many survivors are compulsive
liars, the abuse being the biggest of them all.

19.
Religion.
Safety can be found attaching one's self to a belief system that has clear
boundaries and rules.
Traditional religion
can provide an anchor. The lure of divine forgiveness can be a powerful
pull for the survivor who still feels the abuse was his/her fault. Unfortunately,
destructive cults can
also be alluring to an adult survivor for some of the same reasons.

20. Avoiding Intimacy. Seeming open and friendly
on the surface but hiding real feelings inside. "Avoiding intimacy keeps
one safe - and sometimes leads to positive traits such as independence and
autonomy-- it also means missing out on the rewards healthy relationships
can bring." (E. Bass & L. Davis, 1988).

21. Manipulation. Adult survivors, who are diagnosed
as having a Borderline Personality often are told they are being manipulative.
Once they are able to identify, process and express feelings attached to
manipulative behavior and taught other ways of getting needs met, the
manipulation will usually cease.

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Survivors ARE Heroes!

The Awareness Center believes ALL survivors of sex crimes should be given yellow ribbons to wear proudly.

Survivors of sexual violence (as adults and/or as a child) are just as deserving of a yellow ribbon as the men and women of our armed forces, who have been held captive as hostages or prisoners of war.

Survivors of sexual violence have been forced to learn how to survive, being held captive not by foreigners, but mostly by their own family members, teachers, camp counselors, coaches babysitters, rabbis, cantors or other trusted authority figures.

For these reasons ALL survivors of sexual violence should be seen as heroes!