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Leaving Things Behind – Again?

(The Eight of Cups from the Phantomwise Tarot, by Erin Morgenstern – image from http://blog.littleredtarot.com/eight-of-cups-learning-to-let-go/)

I am pretty sure I have another blog post with the exact same title…is it here?

I wrote that blog post over two years ago now and reading it back I am amazed at so many things in it.

So here I am again, on the precipice of leaving things behind and as you may have already sussed from the last few blogs it is keeping me in a very reflective mood.

This blog has increasingly become a space where I simply express myself when I feel like it, in whatever way I feel like it.

People in my physical life often remark on how brave they find it that I am so open on here.

But this is how I breathe.

I could not, and have never lived without being drawn to writing out the way that I feel. (apart from when I couldn’t write of course!)

At the moment I am in the process of walking away both energetically and physically from a multitude of different situations and people.

This is both liberating and incredibly disorientating.

Staying grounded through meditation and yoga feels like an insurmountable challenge, as I am in a state of anxious excitement that leaves me feeling so tired at the end of each day, that all I want to do is get into bed and turn on my Himalayan salt lamp.

I knew that the changes I am making would lead me to temporarily feel like this before they are in place.

In the long run I will be in a much more secure and calm position, but for now I am feeling the shifts in circumstances like sand beneath my feet.

One of the things that is slowly begin to take up the most brain space, is who exactly can I trust?

As someone who has been let down by many in the past (as we all have) how do I learn to allow new people to be there for me? To help me?

For me it begins in the gut.

We all have an intuition that often screams at us when something is wrong, but it is hard to ascertain if that scream is one of fear or a true warning.

I find that sitting with that feeling for a while, usually helps me uncover what it is really about.

When it comes to who I can trust, letting go of who I cannot trust and walking towards those I can – my gut is my go to.

At the moment I am feeling sad by all the people I have to leave behind because I have either outgrown them or wandered on to a different path.

It’s hard to walk away from people who have not changed, but you have.

On November 8th we will see Jupiter move into the sign of Sagittarius (my sun sign). This is a time of great expansion and growth.

I wish a peaceful and loving transition for all of us into a time that will present many new starts.