Father Barry's late interview with his bishop had been short, devoid of
controversy. Too angry to deny the convenient charge of "modernism," he
sought the street. Personal appeal seemed futile to the young priest
cast down by the will of a superior. To escape from holy, overheated
apartments had been his one impulse. Facing a January blizzard, his
power to think consecutively returned, while for a moment he faltered,
inclined to go back. The icy air struck him full in the face as he
staggered forward. "The only way and one practically hopeless," he
choked. Appeal to the archbishop absorbed his mind as he pressed on,
weighing uncertain odds of ecclesiastical favor. Suddenly he realized
that he had strayed from main thoroughfares, was standing on a desolate
bluff that rose significantly above colorless bottom lands and two
frozen rivers. Wind sharpened to steel, with miles of ceaseless
shifting, slashed his cheeks, cut into his full temples, his eyes. He
bowed before the gust so passionately charged with his own rebellion.
To day he was a priest only in name. For the first time since his
assumption of orders he faced truth and a miserable pretense to Catholic
discipline. Desires half forgotten stood out, duly exaggerated by recent
disappointment. An impulse sent him close to the precipitous ledge, but
he moved backward. To give up life was not his wish. He was defeated,
yet something held him, as in a mirage of fallen hopes he saw a woman's
face and cried out. He had done no wrong. Until the bishop cast him down
he was confident, able to justify esthetic joy in ritualistic service,
which took the place of a natural human tie. Now he knew that his work,
after all, but expressed a woman's exquisite charm. For through plans
and absorbing efforts in behalf of a splendid cathedral he had been
fooled into thinking that he had conquered the disappointment of his
earlier manhood. The bishop had apparently smiled on a dazzling
achievement, and young Father Barry plunged zealously into a great
undertaking. To give his western city a noble structure for posterity
became a ruling passion, and in a few months his eloquence in the
pulpit, together with unremitting personal labor on plans and
elevations, had made the church a certainty. Thousands of dollars, then
hundreds of thousands, fattened a building fund. The bishop appeared to
be pleased; later he was astounded; finally he grew jealous and eager to
be rid of the priest who swayed with words and ruled where a venerable
superior made slight impression. Consequently the charge of "modernism"
fell like a bolt from a clear sky. Until to day Father Barry had been
absorbed in one idea. His cathedral had taken the place of all that a
young man might naturally desire. When the woman he loved became free he
still remained steadfast to his new ambition. It seemed as if lost
opportunity had attuned his idealistic nature to symbolic love which
could express in visions and latent passion an actual renunciation. That
Isabel Doan understood and rejoiced in the mastery of his intellect gave
him unconscious incentive. In the place of impossible earthly love he
had awakened a consistent dream. Without doubt Mrs. Doan's pure profile
was a motif for classic results. When he spoke to her of architectural
plans, showing drawings for a splendid nave and superb arches, her keen
appreciation always sent him forward with his work. Then, like true
inspiration, visions came and went. Vista effects, altars bright with
golden treasures stirred him to constant endeavor. He heard heavenly
music the best his young, rich city could procure... Continue reading book >>