Prince Harry’s Antarctic Race is Canceled; State of His Beard Remains Unclear

If you ask us, anyone who completes a 200-mile trek to the South Pole is a “winner” (hire us for inspirational speeches at your middle school this winter!), but this weekend it was determined there will not be any sort of official champion designated in the Walking With The Wounded Antarctic trek, of which Prince Harry is of course the most notable participant, as the “race” component of the event has been canceled.

The journey began with weather-related obstacles, as the participants were waylaid in Cape Town; then, once they made their way onto the Antarctic land mass, the group had to deal with a crazy-sounding “sastrugi” hurdle. And this is all not to mention the emotional turmoil for Harry related to girlfriend Cressida Bonas flaunting a book titled Why Love Matters in his face back in London as a kind of message (note: we cannot verify the extent or even the actual presence of said emotional turmoil, but, c’mon, you don’t practically shove a book called Why Love Matters in a paparazzo’s face for nothing!).

Anyway, the rationale for the cancelation of the competitive aspect of the event is related to making sure the three teams don’t hurt themselves.

“The reason for this is entirely simple—safety, which remains the core principal of our expeditions,” the expedition director said. “It was becoming evident that there was a higher degree of stress imposed on the team members, due to unprecedented terrain on the plateau.”

Parker noted that the teams had been “progressing well” over the first five days of the event. But now that they realize there is no trophy awaiting them at the end, no winner’s circle to reach, will the teams lose some steam, no longer motivated by the will to win? Will this mean Harry can ditch his squad and hang out with fellow famous travelers Alexander Skarsgard and Dominic West (who were on opposing teams)? And, most important of all, clearly, if Harry's emergent beard was grown to generate some “good luck” (in a Boston Red Sox-y way), does this mean he will now shave it, finding it no longer necessary? Forget sastrugi; that would be an obstacle (. . . for us).