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Monday, March 16, 2015

Pissing folks off

If you are inclined to piss off people, here are a few sure fired ways to do it. First, if you drive by a hitchhiker with his thumb up stick your thumb out the window and turn it down. This really infuriates them. Some of these people get so mad they're jumping up and down. Some years ago my roommate and I were driving along the interstate and I stuck my thumb out and turned it down as we went by a hitchhiker. He was jumping up and down and cursing. And, about ten minutes later, a van pulled up alongside us. It had that hitchhiker in the passenger seat. He started shaking his fist at us and cursing. I stuck my hand out the window and gave him the finger. Then we sped off. Well, out of curiosity, yesterday morning I was curious if that still worked. I gave a thumbs down to a hitchhiker. Yep. It still works.

Now, if that's not your cup of tea, you can call some guy an asshole. In some states like California that will barely garner a response. But if you up to Wyoming and try that, they'll want to fight you over it. Ergo, have an escape route planned.

Don't like that one, either. Well, if someone's driving a pickup truck, toss some fast food garbage in the bed while you're both stopped at a red light. That really seems to piss off these guys. Lots of people dump garbage in truck beds when they're parked, but few have the guts to do it when the driver is in the truck. I've found there's often a few seconds of disbelief that somebody would be so outrageous, which gives you a chance to start your getaway.

If you don't like any of these, then you're probably not somebody who should go around pissing people off.