Where Smart People Dumb Down!

The latest episode of Pretty Little Liars opens with the girls waiting for Emily to arrive from her Championship meet. While there, the cops arrivee to confiscate Caleb’s laptop since its IP address has been traced as hacking into the school’s computer files. (Caleb and this entire computer expert story-line is doing my head in. Nothing can save him from being a boring cunt.)

Meanwhile, Aria really wants to know what Holden is mixed up in. His answer? He’s into Korean martial arts and has to keep it a secret because his parents disapprove.

Elsewhere, Hanna is scared of what “A” may have planted on Caleb’s laptop, so she asks if he can erase his files from another computer. Caleb says yes and tells Hanna the code to get in, but unfortunately his laptop has yet to be logged into. (Oh Jesus, did we really need the obvious plot to be set-up? Hanna saw A’s phone-files were deleted ‘remotely’. And again, this dumb-blonde thing with Hanna isn’t remotely interesting.)

Linfidelity

Spencer bumps into Jason and he tells her he found one of Ali’s boxes at their grandma’s house. Inside, was $ 15,000 and letters from Spencer’s father and Jason’s mom, confirming the affair.

Later, Aria meets the mystery person to whom she spoke on the phone, Vivian Darkbloom’s friend. He turns out to be a former cell-company employee named Jonah. Jonah met Ali/Vivian Darkbloom as she sought information as to who was sending blocked numbed texts to her friend. (Herself, really, but she used her real name to throw him off.)

The information was negotiated at a cost of $2,000, but foolishly, he told her the info he acquired before she paid up. To get the name/number, Aria needs to pay the $2000. (He’s broke, they don’t know him from Adam and if he was legit he’d do it for $500 but these dummies will almost certainly pay and waste the two grand.)

Linterrogation

Trying to stir up more trouble “A” leaves a note on Byron’s car telling him where Aria is going to be that night. Her Dad, using his Professor’s intellect, immediately suspects she is going to see Ezra.

Back at the station, video of the girls disguised as candy-stripers surfaces and Hanna is called in for questioning about Ali’s missing autopsy report. (If they were black they’d have already done two years at Rikers.)

Prior to her date with Holden, Aria’s mother reveals to her that Holden has a heart condition. (I always wonder why people use that description, “heart condition”?) Worried, Aria follows Holden to the dojo.

There, Holden explains to Aria that his disease means his heart can give out at any minute, so he might as well spend his time doing something he loves. (Pretty sure a kick to the chest adds 59 seconds to that ‘minute’)

Aria seems to understand this and stays to root him on, canceling her date with Fitz in the process. And luckily so because not only did her father call and ask to speak to Holden, but visited the restaurant, narrowly avoiding Mr. Fitz.

Linside Job

At the Swim Team’s party, Maya shows up to tell Emily that her parents found an old joint and are threatening to send her back to True North. She claims she is clean, but later, Emily finds her trying to light up. Confronted, Maya decides her best option is to run away to San Francisco. She asks Emily to drop everything and go with her. (When did this character become such a complete dumbass? And I still don’t understand how hippie parents would care that their daughter is a pothead, unless she is constantly taking from their stash)

At the Police Station, Caleb decides to co-operate and login to his laptop. Before doing so he call Hanna and tell her he needs her help since he is in a “hot spot”. Hanna understands this and with Spencer’s help is able to recall the passcode, log in remotely and delete the incriminating files, thus clearing Caleb.

That night, Spencer meets Jason and asks for the $2,000 to help her uncover who it was that Ali was so afraid of. The episode ends with who is presumed to be “A” outside of Emily’s house, spying on her.

1) The Ezra/Aria thing isn’t working again 2) Where is Lucas? 3) Why didn’t Spencer guess it might have been her mother paying Alison. *(Her mother did say the worst thing to happen to them was meeting Alison) 4) This show desperately needs more black people. Spencer needs a man and Hanna’s mom – needs a man too.