Lightning is not exactly a strange way. Neither is texting. Which also explains the high numbers. The rest of them... well, I'll be making sure no murderous vending machines follow me on more quiet roads. I mean, sure, I've cursed and punched a few of them in my life, I've heard they're now getting smart, but not *that* smart, alright?

No, I'm pretty sure they're alive. A few weeks back I wanted Mars bar even though I wasn't hungry. I said it but quietly and guess what - I didn't get any.

Also, I've long suspected ATMs have otherwise homeless people locked inside them. That's why they can't upgrade them - those folks are die hard Windows XP users. Perchance, do you have any statistics on that?

And because nobody ever reads Random Stuff Thread, I'm copying the following important information here:

"Accidents caused by reckless texting and not paying proper attention to operation of vehicles, machinery and appliances kill 5,999 people a year. The remaining one might be a homicidal carrier wave that has somehow achieved capability of reasoning, probably thanks to smartphones."

Lightning is not exactly a strange way. Neither is texting. Which also explains the high numbers. The rest of them... well, I'll be making sure no murderous vending machines follow me on more quiet roads. I mean, sure, I've cursed and punched a few of them in my life, I've heard they're now getting smart, but not *that* smart, alright?

So let’s recap. Stand on a chair, rope around your neck, Peter in your hand. Now you have to time it just right, so that just before you come, you almost die. And sometimes you miscalculate. You don’t know if you’re coming or going.

And the parents of these kids are too embarrassed to tell the police, so they put the kids dick away and say he had poor grades. His girlfriend left him. Oh, wow, no wonder, lady, look at his ######ing hobbies. - George Carlin.