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Five Actionable Steps To Fight Founder Loneliness

Entrepreneurship can be glamorous. It can also be exhausting, scary, and—most of all—lonely. The pressure to succeed can lead to long hours spent alone with your laptop and an overwhelming sense of uncertainty. Worse still, you may feel like no one understands what you’re going through. But countless entrepreneurs have struggled with founder loneliness, and many have discovered the same simple solution: a strong network.

“Founder loneliness is like the elephant in the room. Everyone experiences it at some point in time, yet no one really talks about it,” explained Ling Cai, co-founder and creative director of e-commerce site ZaoZao. “I’ve experienced founder loneliness more than I care for.”

One reason why so few founders are vocal about loneliness is the fear that friends and loved ones simply won’t get it. Other founders, however, will. That’s why building a network of like-minded entrepreneurs is critical to overcoming feelings of isolation.

1. Make time for relationships

Long hours and late nights may help you achieve your business goals, but when they cause you to neglect your personal relationships, both you and your business will suffer.

“As human beings, we have a need to be connected to others. We have a need to build community, and it feels great to belong to something bigger than ourselves,” said Alana Muller, president at Kaufman FastTrac and founder at Coffee Lunch Coffee, a consultancy that helps professionals accelerate their social relationships.

Muller emphasized that loneliness is a temporary problem, and overcoming it starts with a balanced perspective and attitude.

“I suggest developing a strategic mindset around networking, formulating a plan, and then putting yourself out there to connect with others in a meaningful way,” she said. Start by setting some time aside each week to nurture your existing relationships and cultivate new ones. Your business will benefit from a healthier network—and you’ll benefit from meaningful human contact.

2. Set goals

Whether you’re seeking to nurture friendships or build stronger business relationships, it’s critical to have a clear vision for what you hope to achieve.

“When I first started building my network, I aimed for 15 new or renewed connections each week,” Muller said. “Now that my days are a bit fuller, I strive for five to 10 per week.”

According to Muller, networking goals should be measurable. “How many new people will you seek to develop relationships with each day, week, month or year?” she said. You set ambitious goals for your business—so why not do the same for your network?

3. Make the first move

Entrepreneurs have a habit of isolating themselves. The pressure, the loneliness, the stress—sometimes it’s easier to give up on making contact than to pursue connections. But this approach will only lead to more isolation.

“Our prevailing thought is do-it-yourself,” said Muller. “I, myself, have been guilty of this.”

According to Ling Cai, one of the best ways to overcome this barrier is to push past your comfort zone.

“A few months ago, I felt helpless and close to my breaking point. I happened to come across a blog post that really struck a chord. I felt inclined to immediately reach out to the author, despite being a complete stranger.” Cai noted that the author’s response was a turning point in her battle with founder loneliness. “ I wasn’t expecting to get a response, but receiving such a heartfelt reply made me feel a little less alone and crazy.”

Like Cai, you may discover support in unexpected places—but finding an open ear and an open heart starts with you.

4. Build your own community

Poornima Vijayashanker, founder at education startup Femgineer and advisor at 500 Startups, experienced loneliness for almost eight years before learning that she needed to create a support system.

“When I was getting started with my first startup, I worked on a very small team of three,” she said. “Looking back, I wish that I had had a group of people from the very beginning to help me through the challenging moments.”

It’s this perspective that inspired Vijayashanker to start teaching an online course, Lean Product Development, to share her experience with other entrepreneurs.

“I have students who are entrepreneurs from all around the world, many who feel lonesome because they aren’t surrounded by other entrepreneurs where they are,” Vijayashanker said. “As they are struggling to bring their ideas to life, the course helps by giving them a built-in support network.”

5. Change your space

Naveed Lalani’s approach to fighting founder loneliness is to surround himself with creative, like-minded professionals.

“I’ve joined a coworking space,” he said. “I’m able to focus and be at my most creative when I’m in a room with where there is energy.”

Lalani, founder at Portable Boutique, a creator of Bitcoin payment apps for merchants, said he feels reassured knowing that his peers are right next to him, even if he’s buried in work.

“Even if I have my headphones on and I’m at my laptop — just knowing that I can take my headphones off and have a five-minute conversation is reassuring.”

Entrepreneurship may be an individual endeavor, but it doesn’t have to be an isolated one. When you make an effort to connect to other entrepreneurs, you might discover that being founder isn’t as lonely as you thought.

Ritika Puri specializes in business, marketing, entrepreneurship and tech. She writes for American Express OPEN Forum, Forbes, Investopedia, Business Insider, CMO, the SAP Innovation Blog and others.

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