Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 7 years has been communicating extensively with his ex, who lives out of state, for over 6 months. She booked flights and a hotel nearby in a month and invited him. He didn't say no. FML

They've been "communicating extensively". It's not as if one day out of the blue, the ex-girlfriend called and said, "Hey, I'll be in your town in a month or so, want to grab some coffee?" OP's boyfriend is cheating on her with his ex.

I mean yes - not knowing all the details - it does sound dodgy, ex-girlfriend, meeting in a hotel etc., but I mean it has been 7 years! I've definitely got some guys who I don't think I'll ever be completely indifferent about even if I met them after a decade, but then there's some who I've just been good mates and it's ended amicably and I don't really see a reason why you'd have to throw that completely out of the window. Of course be vary of it - that good friendship is probably what lead to romance -, but most likely, especially if he told you about it himself, they somehow ended up on each other's radar after years and were curious of how the other was doing and the conversation just carried on as it would do with friends. It's definitely not grounds for immediate break up!

Dump him immediately.
At the very least, he has been having an emotional affair with his ex. He has also shown that he has every intention of making it a physical affair. Don't give him the, "if you go we're through" ultimatum. Just leave. You don't need to argue with him, or convince him that what he's done is wrong, or get his approval to leave. Just leave.

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