Why Is This Important?

Because horny, overbearing dudes are annoying wherever you go, even in the animal kingdom.

Long Story Short

A new study shows that female animals lack ornamentation like bright plumage or markings in order to avoid unwanted attention from males.

Long Story

It’s been long known that the males of many species use their bright colors and markings as displays of virility, designed to sexually attract females. But, as researchers at the University of Exeter and UC Santa Cruz asked, if males are also picky about the mates they ultimately select, why aren’t females similarly ostentatious?

Because females — and this might come as a shock to some of you — aren’t always that into males, and would really like them to lay off already.

Their study, published in the journal Animal Behaviour, concluded that females want to be more selective about the partners they mate with, since being constantly hit on by desperate males can affect their offspring’s genetic code for the worse.

Other theories about the lack of female ornamentation include the need for greater camouflage and that heavy ornamentation could affect the females’ fertility. Those theories are still plausible, the researchers note. But they are hoping to add the issue of harassment avoidance to the list.

So what’s a lady gotta do to get some peace and quiet? The researchers point out that females in the animal kingdom already engage in behavior designed to discourage unwanted advances, including moving to areas where there are fewer males, disguising themselves as males, using anti-aphrodisiacs and physically resisting copulation.

Own The Conversation

Ask The Big Question: Does anyone need more proof that humans really are just jumped-up apes, just with less hair and more body spray?

Disrupt Your Feed: Biological impulse is not a valid excuse for being a sleazy douche.

Drop This Fact: The theory of sexual selection — that animals engage in competition in order to reproduce — was first proposed by Charles Darwin in The Descent of Man, and Selection in Relation to Sex, published in 1871.