Saturday, February 23, 2008

Dancing Snob

My boyfriend Josh jokingly called me a dancing snob and though it shames me to admit it he’s right. You know that person in the club the one with the natural rhythm and moves, the one people stop to watch dance? I don’t mean to brag but uh well yeah that’s me, I’m that person. Whenever I hear music my blood heats up and I’ve got to dance, it’s like a primordial call that must be answered.

We were recently at a club and after watching me on the dance floor for awhile Josh decided that he was going to dance with me. I was shocked because he’d been so adamant about not liking to dance. I theorize that whenever people say they don’t like dancing it’s either because they can’t or they are just too intimated to give it a shot. One of my theories proved to be right that night.

Josh is many things; he’s cute, funny, generous, kind, sensitive, and caring. Truly God blessed the man with many gifts; unfortunately dancing was not one of them. The BF happens to be a big guy, football player big. In fact he is a former football player. When football player big collides on the dance floor with small female it’s not pretty, in fact it’s down right physically painful. The man had all the rhythm and grace of a cinder block. As soon as we started dancing I felt his mammoth foot crush mine. It was going down bad for yours truly. By the time the song was done I was in some serious pain. I was certain a few of my toes had been severed by his huge ass clod hoppers and were being kicked around the crowded dance floor. We took a break and when the next song started up he started dancing with me again

OUCH!..okay that’s enough… now you’re pissing me off… my toes are not like starfish limbs they can’t regenerate themselves. I thought to myself.

“Josh," I said "I love you for trying but you can’t dance. Dude you’re killing me here.” He laughed and said, “I told you I don’t like to dance!” “And now I know why!” I replied as Guay danced up to me. He inclined his head towards Guay and let her take over. As he made his way back to our table he looked over his shoulder at me and said, “I guess I’m going to have to take some dance lessons before we get married.” “ Lots and lots of lessons man lots and lots!” I replied with a wink as Guay and me started throwing down some serious moves and the crowd gathered around us yelling out their approval.