History Funny / Frasier

* In the first scene, you have this exchange of insults when Niles tries to get Frasier to give his opera ticket to Mel.

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* In As the first scene, you episode opens, it seems all five main characters are dateless on Valentine's Day; Roz and Daphne are planning to spend the evening watching sad movies at Frasier's apartment, while Frasier and Niles have this tickets to see ''Theatre/{{Rigoletto}}'' as Mel is out of town at a conference. However, as Niles arrives, it seems there's been a change of plan, which Frasier doesn't appreciate, leading to a hilarious exchange of insults when Niles tries to get Frasier to give his opera ticket to Mel.insults:

'''Niles:''' Please, Frasier, put yourself in my shoes. I ''have'' to do something for Mel. Every restaurant in town's been booked for weeks. I ran into Archie Wilfong today. He told me he had to settle for two seats at the counter at "The Salad Experience!" What would you suggest I do?\\

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'''Niles:''' Please, Frasier, put yourself in my shoes. I ''have'' to do something for Mel. Every restaurant in town's been booked for weeks. I ran into Archie Wilfong today. He told me he had to settle for two seats at the counter at "The The Salad Experience!" Experience! What would you suggest I do?\\

** This time, Niles is unable to placate Mel, who declares that Niles is "obviously still in love with her" and that she's not about to share him; Roz is fetching her coat during this conversation and so hears every word. The scene ends with the climax of the plot thread that Roz is the only KACL staffer invited to Frasier's Christmas party, as a livid Niles rebuffs Frasier's attempt at an apology by saying, loudly enough for everyone in the room to hear, that he only cares about the party he is hosting that night. As the KACL staff all begin glaring daggers at Frasier for not inviting them to his party, he gets a hilarious fixed grin on his face and slowly tiptoes out of the room.

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** This time, Niles is unable to placate Mel, who declares that Niles is "obviously still in love with her" and that she's not about to share him; Roz is fetching her coat during this conversation and so hears every word.word (but doesn't know that "her" refers to Maris, not Daphne). The scene ends with the climax of the plot thread that Roz is the only KACL staffer invited to Frasier's Christmas party, as a livid Niles rebuffs Frasier's attempt at an apology by saying, loudly enough for everyone in the room to hear, that he only cares about the party he is hosting that night. As the KACL staff all begin glaring daggers at Frasier for not inviting them to his party, he gets a hilarious fixed grin on his face and slowly tiptoes out of the room.

-->'''Gil:''' From the bottom of my heart, I apologise for my wandering eye over the years. Those whom I mentally undressed, and... you know who you are.or defense is that I was a product of the thoughtless machismo of my time.\\

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-->'''Gil:''' From the bottom of my heart, I apologise for my wandering eye over the years. Those whom I mentally undressed, and... you know who you are.or are...\\''(A male and female co-worker look at each other confusedly)''\\'''Gil:''' ...all I can say and it's a poor defense is that I was a product of the thoughtless machismo of my time.\\

* The next day, Frasier is sitting at the dining table, reading the newspaper, and Eddie is staring at him through the glass top. Frasier sneers that Eddie isn't going to distract him this time, and opens the paper so as to completely obscure Eddie from view. Eddie responds by trotting out from under the table and ''jumping several feet into the air.'' '''Repeatedly.'''

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* The next Later that day, Frasier is sitting at the dining table, reading the newspaper, and Eddie is staring at him through the glass top. Frasier sneers that Eddie isn't going to distract him this time, and opens the paper so as to completely obscure Eddie from view. Eddie responds by trotting out from under the table and ''jumping several feet into the air.'' '''Repeatedly.'''

** The episode opens as yet another Frasier-and-Niles-hosted dinner party reaches a messy, premature, and hilarious end. As the guests storm out ''en masse'', one female guest slaps Frasier and says she bets he doesn't even have Tourette's Syndrome ([[HollywoodTourettes he tries shouting a few PG-rated oaths]] after her, to no avail), Niles stamps out another guest's toupee after it was ignited by flaming kabobs (Niles' own idea), the enraged caterer hands Frasier two lobsters and tells him to lose his phone number, and Martin appears from the bedroom wearing a sash and speaking Italian until his sons tell him he no longer needs to pretend to be "the Count". The rotten cherry on the melted sundae is a goat - one of several, apparently - throwing up in the kitchen.** Daphne tells Niles that his track record for throwing parties with Frasier is a disaster, so Niles excludes a very indignant Frasier from the preparation process. The party is intended to celebrate a painting by artist Mike Shaw (who has been invited but declined) that Niles is donating to an art gallery. However, as Roz prepares to leave after helping set things up, she and Daphne discover that Roz' daughter Alice has written her name in crayon on the Shaw painting, and Daphne sends Roz and the painting to an art restorer while replacing the painting with one of Alice's drawings and covering it with a cloth. She then has to spend the rest of the evening defending it from one of the guest's attempts to get a peek.

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** The episode opens as yet another Frasier-and-Niles-hosted dinner party reaches a messy, premature, and hilarious end. As Daphne sits at the dining table with her chin in her hand and an "I knew this would happen" expression on her face, the guests storm out ''en masse'', one female guest slaps Frasier and says she bets he doesn't even have Tourette's Syndrome ([[HollywoodTourettes he tries shouting a few PG-rated oaths]] after her, to no avail), Niles stamps out another guest's toupee after it was ignited by flaming kabobs (Niles' own idea), the enraged caterer hands Frasier two lobsters and tells him to lose his phone number, and Martin appears from the bedroom wearing a sash and speaking Italian until his sons tell him he no longer needs to pretend to be "the Count". The rotten cherry on the melted sundae is a goat - one of several, apparently - throwing up in the kitchen.** Daphne tells Niles that his track record for throwing parties with Frasier is a disaster, so Niles excludes a very indignant Frasier from the preparation process. The party is intended to celebrate a painting by artist Mike Shaw (who has been invited but declined) that Niles is donating to an art gallery. However, as Roz prepares to leave after helping set things up, she and Daphne discover that Roz' daughter Alice has written her name in crayon on the Shaw painting, and Daphne sends Roz and the painting to an art restorer while replacing the painting with one of Alice's drawings and covering it with a cloth. She then has to spend the rest of the evening defending it from one of the guest's attempts to get a peek.

* This episode marks the series' most explicit homage to the farces of writers like Georges Feydeau, and the entire second half is an utter triumph for the writers. Frasier persuades Roz to give him the ski lodge weekend she has won in a church raffle (partly by pointing out that her pregnancy would limit her options for physical activity and partly by bribing her with a big screen TV), and takes along Niles, Martin, Daphne, and Daphne's DumbBlonde friend Annie; the weekend includes ski lessons from French former Olympian Guy. Niles (in the early stages of divorcing Maris) is more determined than ever to pursue Daphne, who is more interested in Guy; meanwhile, Annie has her eye on Niles, while Frasier is hoping to seduce Annie. And as for Guy... he's especially interested in Niles. All it takes is Martin's cold-induced hearing impairment leading to a few miscommunications and Daphne and Annie accidentally going into each other's bedrooms in front of Frasier and Niles, then swapping back after the brothers have gone into their own rooms, and the stage is set for a series of doors opening and closing and shock discoveries of the wrong people in the wrong beds in states of undress. As if that weren't enough, Guy interprets Daphne's attempts to keep Annie away from Niles (due to her history as a maneater) as a sign that they're in a lesbian relationship. Everything gets topped off by Frasier's perfect summation:

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* This episode marks the series' most explicit homage to the farces of writers like Georges Feydeau, and the entire second half is an utter triumph for the writers. Frasier persuades Roz to give him the ski lodge weekend she has won in a church raffle (partly by pointing out that her pregnancy would limit her options for physical activity and partly by bribing her with a big screen TV), and takes along Niles, Martin, Daphne, and Daphne's DumbBlonde friend Annie; the weekend includes ski lessons from French former Olympian Guy. Niles (in the early stages of divorcing (who has just filed for divorce from Maris) is more determined than ever to pursue Daphne, who is more interested in Guy; meanwhile, Annie has her eye on Niles, while Frasier is hoping to seduce Annie. And as for Guy... he's especially interested in Niles. All it takes is Martin's cold-induced hearing impairment leading to a few miscommunications and Daphne and Annie accidentally going into each other's bedrooms in front of Frasier and Niles, then swapping back after the brothers have gone into their own rooms, and the stage is set for a series of doors opening and closing and shock discoveries of the wrong people in the wrong beds in states of undress. As if that weren't enough, Guy interprets Daphne's attempts to keep Annie away from Niles (due to her history as a maneater) as a sign that they're in a lesbian relationship. Everything gets topped off by Frasier's perfect summation:

''[Roz pulls Frasier into some heavy liplock; Stan gets an embarrassed look, turns, and exits... just in time for someone else to enter and take in the sight. Frasier disengages from Roz and turns to see...]''

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''[Roz pulls Frasier into some heavy liplock; Stan gets an embarrassed look, turns, and exits... just in time for someone else to enter and take in the sight. Frasier disengages from Roz and turns to see...]'']''\\

* Roz has Frasier pretend to be her date to convince a man who dumped her that she has moved on (since the man in question kept calling Frasier "Fraser", he hesitantly agrees). After a false start, Roz' ex enters to see Roz and Frasier in the middle of a BigDamnKiss, and leaves with an uncomfortable look... just as Niles arrives and takes in the sight.-->'''Niles:''' ''[off Frasier's embarrassed look]'' Hello.\\

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* The episode opens at Cafe Nervosa as Roz has Frasier pretend to be her date to convince a man who dumped her that she has moved on (since the man in question kept calling Frasier "Fraser", he hesitantly agrees). After a false start, Roz' ex enters to see Roz and Frasier in the middle of gives both Crane brothers a BigDamnKiss, and leaves for different reasons:-->'''Frasier:''' ''[standing at the counter as Roz enters behind him]'' Oh, good morning, Roz!\\'''Roz:''' ''[amorously]'' Good morning... ''[stuns Frasier by passionately kissing him on the lips; it is a few seconds before he has the presence of mind to push her off]''\\'''Frasier:''' What the hell was that!?\\'''Roz:''' ''[looks toward the door]'' Oh, ''shoot'', he's not even here!\\'''Frasier:''' Who?!\\'''Roz:''' D'you remember that guy who dumped me last month? ''[Frasier rubs his lips as though pushing them back into place after the kiss]'' I thought he was right behind me! [[OperationJealousy I just wanted him to see me with an uncomfortable look... another guy]] so he'd know how ''completely'' over him I am.\\'''Frasier:''' Good idea, Roz. If that doesn't work, why don't we just as Niles arrives get married and takes in have some children, that'd really fix his wagon! ''[picks up his cup of coffee]''\\'''Roz:''' You probably remember him - Stan?\\'''Frasier:''' ''[slowly gets a look of disgust]'' Stan, the... the sight.-->'''Niles:''' ''[off Frasier's smug stockbroker who kept calling me [[AccidentalMisnaming "Fraser"]]?\\'''Roz:''' ''[laughs]'' Oh, yeah. That's him. ''[Frasier groans; Roz looks to the door again and sighs in disappointment]'' One minute we're hot and heavy, and then he just stops calling - it's so humiliating when someone treats you like you don't even exist!\\'''Frasier:''' ''[proving Roz' point]'' Well, how can someone not hear the difference between "Frasier" and "Fraser"!?\\'''Roz:''' ''[drily]'' Yeah. That's what bugged me the most, too. ''[rolls her eyes and goes up to the counter to order]''\\''[...]''\'''Roz:''' ''[sees Stan, a tall man in a suit with blond hair and glasses, enter the cafe]'' Oh my God, here he is. Please?\\'''Frasier:''' ''[resigned]'' Oh, all right.\\''[Roz pulls Frasier into some heavy liplock; Stan gets an embarrassed look]'' look, turns, and exits... just in time for someone else to enter and take in the sight. Frasier disengages from Roz and turns to see...]'''''Niles:''' ''[utterly deadpan]'' Hello.\\

'''Niles:''' ''[holds up his hand]'' Please, please, no explanation necessary. I assume at the next meeting of Seattle's "Haven't Kissed Roz Club," it will just be me and the archbishop! ''[chuckles]''\\'''Roz:''' I'll save you the club dues.\\

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'''Niles:''' ''[holds up his hand]'' Please, please, no explanation necessary. I assume at the next meeting of Seattle's "Haven't Kissed Roz Club," Roz" club, it will just be me and the archbishop! ''[chuckles]''\\'''Roz:''' ''[picking up her coffee and marching toward Niles]'' I'll save you the club dues.\\

-->'''Daphne:''' I still can't get over those players. They're positively gi-''gan''-tic! Not that being tall is the only measure of a man. ''[{{Beat}}]'' But it's a bloody good one! ''[doubles over laughing; Bulldog is not so amused]'' Oh, dear, I just insulted you, didn't I! I'm sorry. Oh well, you can take it, you're a tough little nut! ''[backhands Bulldog in the chest; his good mood is eroding more every second]'' Oh dear. This is not good. Not good at all.\\

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-->'''Daphne:''' ''[over the honking of other cars]'' Well that's annoying, isn't it. Certainly is taking a long time getting out of this parking lot. Did I mention this was my first basketball game? Yes, of course I did, three or four times. I still can't get over those players. They're positively gi-''gan''-tic! Not that being tall is the only measure of a man. ''[{{Beat}}]'' But it's a bloody good one! ''[doubles over laughing; Bulldog is not so amused]'' Oh, dear, I just insulted you, didn't I! I'm sorry. Oh well, you can take it, you're a tough little nut! ''[backhands Bulldog in the chest; his good mood is eroding more every second]'' Oh dear. This is not good. Not good at all.\\

'''Daphne:''' Oh, you are a naughty boy! Now, don't go getting any ideas! Oh, look who I'm saying this to. [[DumbJock You don't have an idea in your head!]] ''[doubles over laughing again; Bulldog has the sort of forced grin that must be hurting his cheek muscles]'' Ah, I did it again, I insulted ya! Let's drink to that! ''[clonks her glass against Bulldog's forehead, not helping his mood one bit]'' Boom! ''[laughs again; the honking of other cars gets louder]'' Oh, now, that is downright rude. ''[rolls down the window and yells through a yellow plastic megaphone]'' Hey you there! You in the Firebird! Yes, you! Stop that honking! ''[HONK HONK]'' Oh, now, now, just because you look stupid doesn't mean you have to act stupid!\\

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'''Daphne:''' Oh, you are a naughty boy! Now, don't go getting any ideas! Oh, look who I'm saying this to. [[DumbJock You don't have an idea in your head!]] ''[doubles over laughing again; Bulldog has the sort of forced grin that must be hurting his cheek muscles]'' Ah, I did it again, I insulted ya! Let's drink to that! ''[clonks her glass against Bulldog's forehead, spilling half of her drink and not helping his mood one bit]'' Boom! ''[laughs again; the honking of other cars gets louder]'' Oh, now, that is downright rude. ''[rolls down the window and yells through a yellow plastic megaphone]'' Hey you there! You in the Firebird! Yes, you! Stop that honking! ''[HONK HONK]'' Oh, now, now, just because you look stupid doesn't mean you have to act stupid!\\

'''Bulldog:''' ''[starting to panic]'' Just roll it up, roll it up! ''[rolls the window up again, only for the opposite door to open; the Firebird driver grabs Bulldog by his feet and starts dragging him out]''\\

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'''Bulldog:''' ''[starting to panic]'' Just roll it up, roll it up! ''[rolls ''[tries to roll the window up again, only for the opposite door to open; the Firebird driver grabs Bulldog by his feet and starts dragging him out]''\\

'''Daphne:''' ''[looking out of the window]'' Oh! Well... we're moving. ''[rolls down the window and yells through the megaphone, turning her head to look back as the car moves forward]'' Thank you, [[AccidentalMisnaming Pitbull!]] I had a lovely time!...

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'''Daphne:''' ''[looking out of the window]'' Oh! Well... we're moving. ''[rolls down the window and yells through the megaphone, turning her head to look back as the car moves forward]'' Thank you, [[AccidentalMisnaming Pitbull!]] I had a lovely time!...time!... ''[she picks up the champagne bottle and one of the glasses and tries to pour herself another glass while slowly falling over sideways]''* In TheStinger, Frasier, Martin, and Eddie have joined Daphne, who looks much the worse for wear, in the back of the limousine. While Eddie hangs his head out of the window, Frasier pours himself and Martin a glass of champagne each, but Daphne declines, choosing instead to drop two Alka-Seltzer tablets into a glass of water.

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