Thursday, August 16, 2012

Everybody has fears about being stuck in an elevator. I mean when I saw this guy stuck for 41 hours, it was fuckin terrifying. We've all done it. Looked around the people in the elevator with us and said to ourselves, could I be trapped with these people?

We've all checked our phones to make sure we've got bars and battery life. We've all checked if we have life sustaining food, you know that pack of Orbitz gum. I was stuck in an elevator for 10 minutes once. It was claustrophobic hell but at least I had my friend to keep me company.

Well Elevator tries to play on those fears but doubles the ante by not just cramming 9 people inside but by unleashing a twist. Yup somebody has a bomb in the elevator and everybody pushes the panic button. Comparisons to M Night's Devil isn't too far behind. I found that half assed Twilight zone melodrama-ish. Elevator has a more grounded approach but still goes up and down never really finding a direction to go to.

It's got some suspenseful moments, though a film like has little to do with plot but more if we're willing to spend time with these characters. Do we care enough to be stuck with these people for 80 minutes? I wasn't. These movies where one location is central, viewers tend to want to like the normals and hate the wackos. Oddly enough, they were all wackos.

Elevator pushes our buttons hoping they've pushed the right ones of suspense, thrills and angst. Unfortunately, it misses them all.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Racism collides with corporate greed when nine strangers are trapped in a
Wall Street elevator, and one of them has a bomb. They will do anything
to survive.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Elevator does have a message that of when corporate greed goes awry, Occupy Wall St goes homicidal. But what has to draw you in are the characters and I have to say none of them were people I wanted to see alive.

We have the asshole douchebag comedian, the rich tycoon with his spoiled, bratty granddaughter, the journalist and her alpha douchebag broker boyfriend, the Iranian-American security guard, the fat salaryman, the pregnant eye candy blonde and the old widow.

The only respectable dude was the fat salaryman but even by the end I was tired of him. All have backstories and our strangers become an "elevator family". We do get a few twists as our strangers aren't really strangers. All have agendas but all seem to non be remotely tolerable to spend so much time watching them complain.

When you do an ensemble, you should have 1-2 main antagonists, a comic relief guy, some eye candy and a WTF guy. Elevator has them all but none do a decent job at...well their jobs. In the end, the movie plays on all those fears when trapped in a confined area. Blood starts to boil and survival instincts kick in.

There are some bloody moments and some close calls. But my pesky logic kicks in. At one point, they start streaming the local news. Are you telling me there is wi-fi in this elevator? Elevators in my building are wi-fi dead spots. How big is this elevator? It's like huge in there. Plus the NYPD and security team are the most inept in retrieving our family. You would think they'd be in constant communication with these guys as 2 of them have cellphones

My gripes aside, it's an adequate movie that fits into the Wall St. vs Main St theme. Rich vs poor, black vs white, men vs women. There is serious conflict on all fronts which make this soap opera thriller fun to watch.

In the end though, you think we'll see a twist and explanation. Something bigger than people stuck in an elevator. It never comes and all your left with is listening to cheesy elevator music while thinking you can stream wi-fi at a dead spot.

Gore-ipedia

Some blood splatter and unnecessary surgery.WTF moment

I wish preggers blonde worked with me. Her secret got me saying...WTF.

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

If you liked Devil, this will fill your void. It's got some nice thrilling moments and you do watch to figure out what may happen next.

2 comments:

I didn’t even know that this movie existed, but my heart was pounding just watching the trailer! I was once stuck in the elevator at Dish where I work, but it wasn’t that bad because the walls are all made of glass, so people saw that I was stuck. If the walls weren’t made of glass then I think I would’ve most definitely panicked because I am a little claustrophobic. I’m certainly going to add this to my Blockbuster @Home queue as well as Devil. I don’t normally get scared with scary movies, but being trapped like that terrifies me!