WHAT I LEARNED FROM MY SECOND MARATHON

Coming into running my second marathon I felt confident about my performance. I knew, no matter what I would be able to finish the run. I wanted to beat my past time (3h 56s) and improve my performance. But after running it, I learned so much about running marathons, people and myself.

When training for the marathon, I was only able to get to mile 16. For some reason, I could not get past that but I was not worried. The same thing had happened when I trained for the last marathon and I was able to run all 26.2 miles.

The day of the marathon I was confident about my performance but as I hit mile 13, my legs started tensing. I had never experienced this before, not even on my trainings. Looking back, I didn’t have many factors in consideration one of them – the weather. I didn’t think the weather in LA would be so hot and make me feel dehydrated.

After mile 16, I stopped every other minute and walked to prevent from getting a cramp. While running, I saw a guy going through the same, he would stop every so often and we would keep passing each other. We didn’t interact to support each other throughout the marathon but I could see his pain every time he had to stop.

I continued and though I knew I was not going to be able to perform as well as I wanted, I kept going. I got a few words of encouragement from other runners to keep going which helped me continue the race. But my legs kept cramping and even if I wanted to keep running I physically couldn’t.

Once I was a mile away from the finish line, I knew I was going to able to make it. I was listening when I felt my muscles tightening an about to cramp. But once I was on the last mile, the words of encouragement from the spectators “finish strong” took over. I wanted to finish the marathon and decided to push myself and run until the finish line. But as I was only 20 feet away from the finish line my calves cramped and my legs gave out putting me on the floor.

I was only 20 feet away from it! I could see it from where I was. The pain was so intense and I was rolling hoping it would stop. In the middle of the pain a runner came to help me get up. I instantly recognized him by his bright orange tank. He was the same runner that had seen before going through the same. He stopped to help me and we crossed finish line together!

I was so thankful for his help, I did not expect this from anyone. We talked about the race and how he struggled with it. We took a picture together and went our separate ways. Once I was by myself all these emotions took over and I ended up crying. It was a lot to take in, I felt sad. I did not reach my goal, I fell and my friends weren’t at the finish line – I felt lonely. But what affected me the most and opened up my eyes was receiving the help from this guy, Brian. Because I thought about it and I don’t know if I would have helped him if he had fallen. All I could think about was finishing the marathon and have a descent end time.

It made me sad to think about this but this experience allowed me to think about it. Because I am always focused on myself, finishing on time and beating my personal record. This experience shook me and made me reflect on myself to be a better person or at least be aware of it.

Once I was home and recouping from the marathon, I texted Brian to thank him again. I mentioned to him how I felt and how sad I was about thinking this way. He replied by saying “we are all struggling and going through the same. We just want to get to the finish line.” and if you look at these words, they have a profound meaning that can be translated into many aspects of our lives. This is where my love from running comes from. The struggles that we face and the goals that we achieve after a lot of work and sacrifice.

This second marathon taught me to be selfless and help other along the way. I find it funny that I learned so much about myself from a run. The main event took a second place and everything that happened around it made it an even richer experience.

“RUNNING HAS SHOWN ME THE GOOD IN HUMANITY”

I NO LONGER FEEL STUCK

Last week I moved out of my apartment of 3 years and although it wasn’t by choice, I am glad I did – I no longer feel stuck! I am ready to move on and move forward with my life. Sometimes we take unexpected events in our lives in a negative way. It may the universe/God pushing us to move forward into a different path. I am certain this exactly what happened to me. I had lived in the same place for three years. I was comfortable but not happy not happy, if it weren’t for this situation I would have not done anything about it.

This change will force me to get other aspects in my life going for myself. I had been stuck for a while and this is the perfect opportunity to start the ball rolling and get the things I want. It feels as if I move one piece of the puzzle there rest of it will come together. And it already has, I mean when I got the news I was stressed out and not sure what i’d do next. San Francisco is one of the most expensive cities in the United States and looking for an apartment can be hard. With no other alternatives I looked on Craigslist for apartments and roommates. I started looking and applied at different places I liked. But one thing is applying and another is the getting the room and the people in the apartment linking you.

I found a place in a great location, a location where I always wanted to live. Roommates are gay and one of the roommates is from Venezuela, like me! When I found this place, it felt as if this was meant to be… I knew I was going to get this place, there were many coincidences. All I could think was what are the chances of this happening. Everything I wanted at once! I went to the interview and a couple days later I got the news, I got the place!

Now my next concern was what about a job! I currently have a job but since my rent will increase I need a better paying job. A new opportunity to be able to support myself. As I have mentioned many times before, this is a constant struggle for me. I am always looking for opportunities and it hasn’t been easy. This new apartment is happening and I need to figure out a way to make it work. For this reason, I need that push even if I want it or not to make things work. I have no other alternative but to make it work… and here I am. I kept applying for job opportunities as usual, some would respond some wouldn’t.

Soon enough, I received an email from someone interested in a project for me to work on. I have gone to A LOT of interviews and they usually take weeks and sometimes months. But this one to be honest has been the fastest job I have ever landed. It did not take more that 2-3 days for me to apply, interview and get the news that I got the job – a good job, a good project!

Again, I couldn’t believe everything was happening so fast in a short amount of time. One thing after the other one. I get the job, I get the apartment and I get to live in a central spot in San Francisco. I now have the potential of meeting new people through my new roommates. It is definitely a new start, a definitely needed fresh start! This definitely feels as if it’s meant to be… Too many casualties and too many things working on my favor to not be. Things are working out… I no longer feel stuck!

THINGS ARE COMING TOGETHER, THINGS ARE WORKING OUT!

I NEED TO STOP WASTING TIME AND GET
THINGS DONE

It is clear to me that I have a problem, I need to stop wasting time and get things done. I know that in order to make things happen, we need time but when we have the time we do nothing about it. At least I don’t or haven’t. It’s like we want to continuously give ourselves excuses for not doing what we want – “Oh, I don’t have the time”, “Oh, I don’t have the money.” It’s all excuses that we make ourselves to not feel bad.

I mention this because I have said all of these things to myself and when I finally have the time to work on what’s going to take my life further, I just don’t. It is so frustrating that I don’t take advantage of the free time I have, as I should. I need to learn to be more discipline and organized with everything I do if I want to make things work.

I guess big part of this problem is because there is no immediate accountability for not doing anything about it. But if you really think about it there is and it is time, time that will not come back. I know, I don’t want to tell myself in the future: If only I did thing earlier!

I am glad, I am aware of this about myself, I know I have to work on this. I need to go for it and not waste time or just sleep in just for the sake of it (laziness). I want to create things and see the fruition of my work!I NEED TO STOP WASTING MY TIME AND GET THINGS DONE AND SUCCEED! I NEED TO STOP WASTING MY TIME AND GET THINGS DONE AND SUCCEED!

NOTHING COMES EASY, WORK FOR WHAT YOU WANT!

RUNNING IS MY MEDITATION

Some people meditate, others do yoga but me, I run. The more I run, the more I realize it is key for me to keep a sane life. I haven’t practiced meditation and I’ve done yoga a few times but every time I am done with my runs no matter how long or short, I always feel good and at peace with myself.

Now that I am doing it more often because of the upcoming marathon I will be running in LA (Achieving Goals) I have noticed that skipping a day or two changes my mood, I stress out more than normal. It feels as if I miss getting rid of all the crap in my head and all the bad thoughts, it puts me in a weird mood.

Running literately oxygens my brain and I can feel it right away, I can tell by the way my state of mind changes. It is positive, I feel accomplished, wanting to do more with a completely different outlook. Something that keeps happening, for example, is that I think about something in specific and have negative thoughts about it. I look at it as if there is no way out but once I go running and during or after the runs, I have a different perspective. I can think of a solution to the problem or just be hopeful and positive about the situation.

I love the relationship I have with myself while running even if I don’t feel like running, which happens often, I know I will feel much better right after. It’s like a double win, mentally and physically because every time I run I am improving myself.

IMPROVE YOURSELF MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY!

FEELING DOWN TODAY, I’M FINE.

Gray day, the sun never came out today in San Francisco, it has been raining all say and to be honest I feel down, There is no specific reason why, I just feel down today, I just do.

Yesterday I had an eventful day a full day. I ran, exercised, went to a march and hung out with friends. It was a good day but then this morning I felt empty with no desire to do anything. I have heard from friends that sometimes it is normal to come down after a high, being surrounded by so many people . I guess I got a high from it but inevitably a down came with it right after. That was the only reason I could think why I felt this way.

As the day progressed, I just accepted it, today is not a good day emotionally. I did not feel depressed, I was just down. Watched TV, went online and watched the rain fall in a gray San Francisco day. I know this feeling is momentary and tomorrow I will be fine. Sure, we all have days like these, they suck, I want to know the reason why they come? I just knew the next day I would be fine back to my routine running and enjoying life.

SOME DAYS ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS.

PERSPECTIVE

I’ve learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. I Recently had an eye opening experience with my brother, I needed to be reminded of all the things I have accomplished and really put things in perspective instead of focusing on all the things I have not accomplished yet.

I am constantly focusing on the negative and complaining about the things that are not working out in my life. The constant struggle and the uncertainty, not being able to plan a future for myself. I have been so focused on that for the longest time that I had not taken the time to think about all the things I have accomplished.

If I think about it, I have done and I am doing what I wanted to do. I finished high school, came to San Francisco for college got my Bachelor’s, decided to get a Masters and went to Spain. Traveled throughout Europe and eventually came back to San Francisco. Leaving San Francisco and being gone for a couple of years made me realize how special this city is and how much I love it. I always knew I wanted to live in a big city, have the experience of living in a metropolitan city and meeting interesting people from all over the world. I have done everything I wanted, of course with the help of my family, but if I didn’t have the drive to pursue all of those things, none of them would have happened.

It took my younger brother to take me aside to tell me how proud he is of me. For going after everything I want, for going against everything and not caring about people’s judgement and living an honest life. He said that I may not see it that way because I am focusing on the things that I’m struggling with at the moment but since he is able to see it from a different perspective and look at it from another point of view, he can see all of the things I have accomplished.

To be honest I did not expect to hear this from him, although our relationship is much better now. Growing up we were always fighting with each and not necessarily affectionate towards each other. I really appreciated his words so much so that brought tears to my eyes. It immediately gave me perspective, it was like a slap in the face to react and really be thankful for what I have and look at things differently.

FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE!

CHANGE IS ALWAYS GOOD!

Change is always good, I feel like every time we have the opportunity to change things in my life it always brings new things in my life. Things that I may have never been exposed to if I never made that change or being forced to make that change.

I recently learned that I will have to move out of the apartment I have lived in that past three years in San Francisco. The news came as a surprise, it was totally unexpected and though initially I thought this was the worst thing that could happen to me, I took the time to think about it and I changed my mind and thought this could be something positive, a new beginning.

I have been living in this place for a while but to be honest this apartment does not reflect my style, I’m at an age where I should make this transition into living with by myself or at least that I love. It is curious how things workout themselves, this change is pretty much forcing me into adulthood. Forcing me to find my own place, forcing me to make that move that I would not have if the circumstances were different.

I am definitely stressing out about it but I know this is the right move, I need to do this. It feels like a chapter is ending and a new one is about to start. I have previously mentioned that sometimes I feel stuck and that things don’t go my way, I think this change will help move things along. I am impressed with myself and how well I am taking this news, I could be stressing out, crying and pulling my hair not being sure what to do but for some reason that is not the case. I am stressed out but happy… Looking forward to this change and not playing the victim on how things don’t work out my way.

EVERYTHING IS ABOUT PERCEPTION!

ACHIEVING GOALS

As part of my new year’s resolution I decided I wanted challenge myself and push myself to accomplish tangible goals. This year I decided I wanted to run a marathon, I am a runner and love running! I have only ran a marathon once before and this will be my second one. I loved running it the first time and I want to repeat the experience. This time to make it more special I decided to sign up in another city, this time I will be running LA Marathon. I have been in LA a few times but not enough to say I know the city. This marathon will allow me to see the whole city literately!

I have noticed that every time I have a race/goal my state of mind changes. I focus on accomplishing this challenge and this time of course, I want to do better than my last marathon. it keeps me focused on training, running and really paying attention to what I do to my body. It not only is a personal commitment but also a financial one too, which helps to really take this seriously.

The LA Marathon will be on March 19th, I already started training but still have not gotten to the half-marathon to have an idea of my time. I will run it in the next few days and share my time!

LIFE IS ABOUT ACHIEVING GOALS!

WHAT IS MY PURPOSE?

I often think about my purpose in life, Im sure we all do, and though I am still not 100% sure what it is, I believe it has to do with helping others. Helping people overcome difficult times.

For this reason, I write about my difficulties and thoughts about life. I am sure many people like me may be going through hardships and just knowing that other people go though similar situations makes me feel a little better in the sense that we can all relate to one another. Just by knowing that other people are going though similar situation helps us realize that we are not the only ones feeling a certain way about a situation we may be going through.

I struggle everyday with little things and for a long time I thought it was just me but as I have opened up and talked about my insecurities and curiosities about life and human behavior, I have realized that I am not as crazy as I thought! Life is like a roller coaster or as a friend recently told me: We are water and as we know the ocean sometimes is unpredictable it is never a smooth sail, there are parts where things are smooth and others that are going to be rough we just need to learn how to handle ourselves in those situations.

When having deep conversations with friends, I have realized that I am more in tune with myself that I thought, I know this from their feedback. I am aware of what is not working in my life and I know I need to make some changes in my life. I just need to start working on a plan to make those changes! I think we all need to get to a place were we feel connected with ourselves, our feelings and be aware of our surroundings. Things are never going to be PERFECT but it all depends on us to be fine with it and make the most of our situation, make a change and find happiness even in the difficult times.

HELP OTHERS!

New Year, New Me!

2017 is going to be my year… New year, new me! I am done struggling, thinking the world is against me and feeling sorry for myself. I am tired of feeling this way, I switched my way of thinking to believe that this year will be the start of great things.

I am constantly complaining about my finances, career and non-existent relationships and how miserable I feel about it, how I wish it would be different. I have done a lot to get out of the misery and feel like things are going my way but in all honesty it all ends up falling flat. NOTHINGS HAPPENS! But for some reason, I feel differently now… People usually say when you want a job you have to believe that job is yours, project that and you will get it. Or, if you want a change you have to have within you to make those changes. Perhaps, your are rolling your eyes while reading this, I know I did every time I heard someone say this but for some reason I believe it now.

I have noticed how I’ve changed my way of thinking, I am more positive. Small things don’t affect me as much and I am hopeful things will change for the better SOON! I’m doing fine, it’s just I want certain parts of my life to improve and that’s what this year will be about. I want to be fulfilled, take ownership of my life and take it to the next level. I know I have been stuck for a while and it is time to change that. Some things are already happening that leads me to believe that this will be a good year!