After a 5 year struggle with anorexia (with purging tendencies), depression, self harm and over exercising I have now been recovered for 4 years and i use my blog to help others in the same situation i once was.
I am now a happy and positive person who wants to inspire those struggling to choose recovery and to take control over life and happiness again!

Life without Anorexia

My motto is 'Dont let the sadness of your past & the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present'

My life at the moment is completely different to how it once was. I spent 5 years sick with anorexia nervosia and depression as well as struggling with self harm and overexercising. I spent 2 years in different treatment centres.

And since 2012 i have been declared healthy from my eating disorder.

I have been blogging for 7 years, and my whole journey is written in my posts. I now represent healthy and happiness. I want to show anyone struggling that it is possible to recover, no matter how hard it may seem.

I now blog about recovery, my life, veganism and positivity!

If you have any questions leave them in the comment section as i am much quicker at answering there, otherwise you can always send an email: lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com

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Sunday, July 24, 2016

6am workshift, surviving the day and pizza dinner with my family

Hello :)

First off i want to start off by saying thank you to everyone who has reached out to me via comments, emails, messenger and even on snapchat and has tried to give me advice or just reassure me that i will feel better. And i know i will, everything gets easier over time and doing things i enjoy is one way to make things feel better!

Today, Sunday.... though i havent really understood that it is Sunday. I was awake at 4am as i started my workshift at 6am this morning and needed to leave the house at 5am to make it in time.

Today was my first day working on the "floor" i.e unpacking products and filling the shelves and i can say... it was tough work. The first 2,5 hours i was like a zombie but then i ate breakfast at work and the next few hours went by fast, but i must say it was very tiring. And it wasnt until i finished my workshift that i realised how active i had been during my hours at work but also just how tired i felt.

It is funny how when i applied for work i wanted to be on the floor and to stack shelves, but now i am so thankful that i got the cashier work as i enjoy that so much more. It's fun and stressful and there are rude customers at times, but once you get into it, it is actually super fun. And i missed sitting in the cashier while i was working on the floor today, hahaha.

After my workshift it was just to head home and rest up and eat food before i then began preparing cake and dinner for family as we were celebrating my step dads birthday.

On the menu was pizza and for dessert a chocolate cake with lots of different chocolate and some vanilla tofu ice cream for me! I wasnt super excited to bake using eggs and butter but that was the ingredients i had at home and i felt like... "the ingredients are already bough so might as well use them" but i would have prefered to make a vegan chocolate cake so that atleast i would have been able to eat it. But there was tofu ice cream anyway!

Otherwise, it has been nice to spend some time with my family and to have a lovely dinner together. But also i have had a few conversations with my mum and dared to open up more recently and it feels strange... so strange, but it is also kind of nice. To just sit and talk... like therapy i guess. Maybe therapy isnt completely out of the question... because when i let my guard down then i can really begin talking. But it is just that 99.9% of the time i have walls around me and my guard up and i dont dare say anything, but then at times i let those walls down and i can just talk.... i guess its about who i feel comfortable with as well. Anyway...

Also a note - dont comment on my weight in the pictures of me. I am aware of how i look, please dont mention it.

(My snack when i got home soya yoghurt, fruit, watermelon and had a few scoops of ice cream just because i could, hahaha. P.s we had two pakets of ice cream at home)

2 comments:

I am so happy to hear you are opening up more, Izzy! I started seeing a psychologist a few weeks ago, even though I do not suffer to the same extent as it seems you do - but it has worked wonders! Just to have someone to say ANYTHING to. The best part is that when I open up and share something "shameful" or something I thought makes me crazy, my psychologist just sits and listens understandingly - then after I've told her, she explains a logical reason to why I do these things, and it just makes me feel SO RELIEVED!! :D The best part is that it takes a lot to shock a psychologist, they've seen waaayy worse cases. Besides I thought therapy was like a "professional" thing. It is not unserious though, but I did not know that I would talk to my psychologist as I would to a friend - we have both laughed and cried. They are just humans with emotions too. I am sooo sooo sooo happy I went to therapy! Did you know many people see a psychologist simply because they want to achieve a goal? Like to get the right mindset to lose weight or to be able to do better at work etc. Not just "crazy" problems ;)

I`m so glad you have felt able to open up to your mum a bit - it will certainly help you to talk about how you feel rather than keeping it all inside. I tried a couple of different therapists before I found one I could relax with and actually talk to - they aren't all the same and if yours and theirs personalities don`t gel then it makes sessions very difficult! I saw several women before I came across a male therapist, and he was the best. During my sessions with the previous therapists I just didn't know how to talk to them and the whole thing was a waste of time, but with the male therapist it was fine and I managed to talk freely to him - and the best thing is you can say whatever you want - they aren't shocked or make judgement. The hour session used to fly by. So if you choose therapy know that it can take time to find the right one for you. Your chocolate cake looked amazing - I really wish I was so creative! Hope you had a lovely birthday celebration with your family. Hope you have a good week this week and try to rest when you can. Emotional stress is very draining and coupled with your workload you don`t want to over do it.

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About Me

Hello :)
I have had Anorexia and depression for c.a 5 years and been in and out of hospital for 2 years. But now im living my life like a normal teenager, I still have my ups and downs now and again, but i still stay positive and never give up.
In my blog i write about my daily life, and my opinions and views on certain things and i bring up topics and information that i think needs to be passed on!!
Leave a comment - love reading comments from people :)
If anyone wants to get in contact with me.
Mail me here --> lifewithoutanorexia@hotmail.com