Call to ban juggling whilst driving

Road safety campaigners Brake have called today for a total ban on juggling whilst driving. The demand, supported by the Association of Chief Police officers, is accompanied by figures that show that the juggling of 3 or more objects may have a detrimental affect on driving ability and even increase stopping times.

A spokesman for Brake told us “People assume that just because it is illegal to juggle fire clubs at more than 30 mph it is perfectly safe to juggle balls, bean bags or fruit. Unfortunately we have evidence that even performing the most rudimentary of circus acts whilst driving is highly dangerous. Particularly when blind folded.”

Within some circles the simple act of joy riding has been replaced with the feat of driving relatively sensible cars within the speed limit, whilst also juggling, performing tricks on a diablo or spinning numerous tea cups on 2 metre long sticks. The Blackbird Leys estate in Oxford is one well known black spot where hundreds of youths gather to watch and cheer on their peers performing most circus tricks short of lion taming whilst driving modest family hatchbacks.

The trend is sadly not limited to young people. According to Brake, elderly people are also to be targeted due to the recent trend of performing mediocre magic tricks whilst driving through town. “Over sixties have far more difficulty with their eyesight and reactions without pulling rabbits out of hats and trying to make their passengers disappear. It’s only a matter of time before someone runs a red light.”

The move does not have universal support and the Government have ruled out a blanket ban on circus acts whilst in charge of a motor vehicle. Jeremy Clarkson has called this a victory for common sense arguing “We can understand juggling fire clubs being illegal and anyone who does deserves to have points on their licence. But banning all forms of juggling in the car is the nanny state at it’s worst and plays straight into the hands of the non driving lefty anti circus people.”