collection of things,sayings,jokes,pictures and things that amuse me and music that appeals to me

Thursday, February 5, 2009

204Some time over the next 24/36 hoursthis humble little blog will record 50,000 hitsI thank you all for your supportBlogger is not allowing me to put in the "Post a Comment"However you can do this at the end of this postImust remember to drink to this+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Economic Stimulus Payment"This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment.This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:Q. "What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?"A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.Q. "Where will the government get this money?"A. From taxpayers.Q. "So the government is giving me back my own money?"A. Only a smidgen.Q. "What is the purpose of this payment?"A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.Q. "But isn't that stimulating the economy of China? "A. Shut up.++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++MUSICInstrumental HitsThere is very little footage of "Mr Piano "Floyd Cramer on You TubeHowever I found thisFloyd Cramer.....Last Date\+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

DOG FOR SALEEven if you don't own a dog at present,you'll appreciate the efforts of this owner to sell her dog.Read her sales pitch below...

Dog For SaleExcellent guard dog.Owner cannot afford to feed him anymore,as there are no more thieves, murderers, or molesters left in theneighborhood for him to eat.Most of them knew him as 'Holy Shit'.Thanks Joan+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

One hot summer day, a blonde came to town with her dog,tied it under the shade of a tree, and headed into arestaurant for something cold to drink.Twenty minutes later, a policeman entered the restaurant and asked,'Who owns the dog tied under that tree outside?The blonde said it was hers.Your dog seems to be in heat' the officer said.The blonde replied, 'No way. She's cool 'cause she's tied up under that shade tree.The policeman said, 'No! You don't understand. Your dog needs to be bred.''No way,' said the blonde. 'My dog doesn't need bread.She isn't hungry 'cause I fed her this morning.'The exasperated policeman said, 'NO! You don't understand.Your dog wants to have sexThe blonde looked at the cop and said,'Well, go ahead. I always wanted a police dog.Thanks Joan++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

CARTOONS.........Cowboys and Indians

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LAWYERS AT WORK

A judge in a semi-small city was hearing a drunk-driving case and the defendant,

who had both a record and a reputation for driving under the influence, demanded a jury trial.

It was nearly 4 P. M.

And getting a jury would take time,

so the judge called a recess and went out in the hall looking to impanel

anyone available for jury duty.

He found a dozen lawyers in the main lobby and told them that they were a jury.

The lawyers thought this would be a novel experience

and so followed the judge back to the courtroom.

The trial was over in about 10 minutes and it was very clear that the defendant was guilty.

The jury went into the jury room, the judge started getting ready to go home,

and everyone waited.

After nearly three hours, the judge was totally out of patience

and sent the bailiff into the jury-room to see what was holding up the verdict.