Tales from the Critic: A Little Squirrel Needs Her Ice Cream

Don’t you just hate nightmares? I used to feel quite comfortable as I slept safe and sound at night but recently I have been having a lot of trouble fending off the monsters and other bogeymen from invading my mind in the wee hours. And last night was a whopper of one. And I did not have any relief upon opening my eyes, which made it an awfully difficult challenge as I attempted (unsuccessfully) to fall back to sleep.

The sun eventually rose, though, and I enjoyed a cup of coffee while watching last week’s episode of “Blackish,” in which Zoey and Junior attend a high school party. Note to younger readers: Please do not attend high school parties. They are filled with alcohol, drugs and other potential dangerous situations. That may sound like a strange thing for someone who has publicly admitted to going a little crazy at themed bar crawls to say but rest assured that that is mostly an act and that I would never put myself – or my relationships with the people I love – in jeopardy. And I hope that the people I love would always take the same precautions.

I then worked out while watching “The Amazing Race.” Some days are more difficult than others to complete my strenuous exercise routine but I am determined to live a long and healthy life and be the best (looking) version of myself possible for that extra special woman in my life whom I have every intention of eventually marrying. Even though she has often comforted me by saying she loves me no matter what I look like, etc., I would still like to make sure my large bicep is one she is proud to wrap her arm around and my muscular chest is one she is delighted to rest her head on. That is the best motivation to fight through the pain that anyone could ever ask for.

After my workout, I bathed – yes, I bathe instead of shower – and shaved. Although always relaxing, I could not help but feel lonely during these activities for some reason. Maybe I need some music to keep me company. You know, rock out to Justin Timberlake’s “Can’t Stop the Feeling” or process my emotions to Jason Mraz’s “I Won’t Give Up on Us.” (By the way, I won’t. Never ever ever no matter what life throws as us.) Once done, I headed to Starbucks to pick up their food donations for the food ministry for which I volunteer and, upon arriving back home, enjoyed a quarter of a smokehouse burger and a few fries that I had gotten for free on Saturday at Ruby Tuesday with a coupon my mom had received for her birthday earlier this month…

It was then that I heard back from Chef Norman Love’s publicist, requesting additional details about the proposed Easer Egg decorating segment on Breakthrough Entertainment’s Easter Special. She asked about the segment’s length and the show’s live video stream platforms. I informed her that the roughly 15-minute segment would appear on Breakthrough Entertainment host Dave Isaac’s Facebook Live and likely also on Stream.Live – a platform we will probably be utilizing in place of Periscope. Should this be the case, our loyal listeners will be able to access our live in-studio audio and video feed via the Stream app on mobile devices and via Stream.Live/BreakRadioShow on PCs. This is, of course, in addition to the usual audio-only feed via 1480kphx.com and the station’s KPHX free mobile apps available on the Apple iTunes and Google Play stores. The publicist said she would circle back to me after checking Chef Love’s schedule. All I could do was sit back, wait and enjoy a cup of hot coco…

With several of my eBay listings ending today, I decided to start pareparing the selling items for shipment. A set of four Goosebumps bookmarks – the highest earner – were easy enough to slip into a padded envelope with some protective cardboard. A Radio Flyer red wheelbarrow and a Goosebumps board game, however, posed a bit more of a challenge. I managed to make it work, though, and later I sat down to enjoy some cheddar cheese and pico de gallo stuffed mushrooms…

The cheddar cheese and pico de gallo stuffed mushrooms were a bit better than yesterday’s mozzarella cheese and spinach stuffed mushrooms, partially because the cheddar cheese had a stronger bit to offset the pungent flavor of the mushrooms. Well, that and because pico de gallo has tomatoes in it and God knows I love tomatoes – especially cherry tomatoes, which were once again atop the salad I also ate for lunch…

After an embarrassingly extended amount of time wondering and worrying whether or not someone about whom I care deeply and miss to the point of emotional exhaustion ever even thinks about me much less still plans on keeping important promises (yesterday was a special anniversary and I did not hear from this person, thereby causing my heart to ache), I watched “Days of Our Lives” and “Ellen” and was surprised to see some of my eBay listings for Goosebumps items be subjected to intense last-minute bidding wars. I rewarded myself with a glass of Prairie Farms Orange Peeps Milk…

Hoping to maintain my momentum (and divert my thoughts), I listed several more items on eBay before eventually allowing my day to wind down with the latest episode of “Big Brother Canada.” I had watched the previous two episodes (in which Gary was evicted and William won Head of Household) on Sunday afternoon while I was not feeling very well. I was glad to see Dillon nominated for eviction but sad to see Sarah… I mean Emily beside him. After that I watched the previous night’s episode of “2 Broke Girls” and drowned my sorrows in a slice of blueberry pie…

Oh and before heading off to bed (for what will probably be another round of nightmares no doubt), I would like to share with you an instant mood booster of a little squirrel who needs her ice cream. It brought a smile to my face and I am certain it will do the same for you. After all, the only thing cuter than a little squirrel eating ice cream is a little chipmunk: Squirrel Served Daily Ice Cream Cone at Holden Beach Business

Joseph J. Airdo is a film critic, producer and on-air personality for Breakthrough Entertainment, a talk radio show airing 10-11 a.m. Saturdays on KPHX 1480 AM and BreakRadioShow.com that shines a spotlight on the practical perspectives of the topics and themes explored in movies. He has a pet duck named Frozen who is as opinionated about movies as he is. E-mail him at joseph.airdo@gmail.com.