4 responses to “#204”

I’m torn. While Bear Lawyer is undeniably brave (and incredibly well armed for confronting a dead hand), he is standing on ecclesiastical property bestowed in perpetuity upon the Mayne family. This makes Mortimer well within his rights to raise hue and cry. However, should Mort’s hue and cry lead him off holy ground . . . definitely fair innings to Bear Lawyer!

Bear Lawyer would not dispute ownership of the property, but he would assume that he has the right of way to travel unmolested across the late Justice Mortimer Mayne’s grave. Celebratory dancing and/or public urination being another thing entirely.

In any case, Mort Mayne is technically deceased—certifiably, at the very least—so his legal standing and ability to raise hue and cry intelligibly, and with rightful expectation of non-zed-word assistance, are dubious at best. That, and the bite-y, tenacious nature of the undead would certainly leave Bear Lawyer well within his rights to engage in preemptive self-defense, whether by cricket bat, chainsaw, or handy-dandy S-Mart boomstick. One must needs keep our cemeteries clean of reanimated corpses, particularly at this time of year.

(Notably, BL’s shirasaya-enclosed daitō was left back at the den, as bladed weapons and holy ground are an historically poor combination.)

Bear Lawyer will convey your appreciation to his reluctant biographer, and will administer corrective/instructive beatings if and when the standards of production fall below the proverbial bar set herein. Sadly, it’s the only way he seems to learn anything.