I love old Chinese kung fu movies like Drunken Master because of the overzealous Foley editors.Â Whenever anyone in the film moves around, a swishing sound is heard.Â When contact with another object is made, a loud crack or bump is generally heard.Â For example, if I were in an old kung fu movie and I were reading a book, you would hear “swish – bmmp – sssh – chck – fssssh – bmmm – fsssh” as I picked it up and turned the pages.Â The subtitles are another really neat aspect of old kung fu movies, since they tend to contain incredibly imaginative uses of grammar, particularly involving contractions.Â They also offer innovative spellings.Â When you combine these features with puns that are lost in translation, you can get some fantastic results. Â Here’s an example dialogue:

Wong Kei-ying: Regard that firl!Â She is good, not bad.

Wong Fei-Hong: I will have her to embrace me.

Girl: Unrighteous sex maniac!Â Don’t you know who I’m?

Wong Fei-Hong: No, I do not know who you’re.

Girl: I am too angry!Â Now I must beat you with many-fisted swan of tiger.