Look… I know you’re not used to her being here, and we’re all trying to adjust, but if we just give this a little time, I think everything will work out okay. Eventually.

Work out okay? Are you shitting me? You know I could barely deal with life as it was. My nerves are absolutely shot. I can’t close my eyes for a minute. I don’t dare.

Why? It’s not like she’s going to attack you.

You know this to be true? How can you be certain of that? I’ve seen how Mom controls her. It’s all after the fact… after she ran up the couch and hit the window… after she pulled the floor lamp over… after she grabbed my purple ball. Right out of my mouth! Close my eyes? I don’t think so.

Okay. You’re right. I know it sucks right now. Believe me. I haven’t slept much since she got here either. I’m exhausted. I get it.

She’s been here, like, forever.

She’s been here two days.
You know I’m not good with that time thing. It feels like forever to me. I can barely remember what life was like before she got here.

I understand your commitment to zen. You’re the best at living in the moment. I’ve learned so much from you about all that, but I can’t help feeling that you might be obsessing about this a little bit.

I used to wake up at a specific time. Eat at a specific time… in the center of the sewing room… by myself. I hung with you whenever I wanted to, knowing I could catch a few winks if the work load got a little too heavy.

The work load?

Listening for the door bell! Hello! Delivery trucks still drive up these streets, you know. There is no way to know when a delivery guy may want to sneak in and wipe out our pack. Is that what you want? I don’t think so.

Let’s not get back on the delivery guy thing.

Fine.

And let’s not argue. I don’t want to argue with you, and I know you would much rather play some fetch or something than argue. Anger isn’t your style.

It didn’t used to be. But I’m worried. I feel my happy starting to slip away. No. That’s not right. My happy’s gone. I’m a bundle of anxiety at this point. What I’m worried about is death. I think I might just explode and die. I’m afraid we all might explode and die.

We’re not going to explode and die. Astrid has a lot of energy. All puppies do. You did, too. But she can’t make anyone explode and die. It’s not physically possible.