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Infatuation

Secretly, she knew
that he wasn’t good for her!
In a moment,
in the blink of an eye,
on the first encounter
she knew!
Deep in her psyche,
inside her substance
she felt apprehension.
But she ignored
the warnings,
she quieted the small voice,
the voice of reason.
She wanted him,
she ached for love.
She wanted to prove
somehow,
that she was lovable.
How foolish she was,
how idiotic
to believe at nineteen
that he was her last chance
for love!

They cautioned her about him,
her friends,
acquaintances.
She saw the look
in her family’s eyes,
she saw their concern,
their dismay.
Some said
he was a womanizer.
She didn’t want to believe them.
She imagined,
even fantasized
that her love could change him,
and make him a better person!

In the beginning
he pursued her
like a valuable treasure.
He was attentive
charming
and kind.
He showered her with adoration,
but his charm
deceived her.

She lived in a make-believe world,
ever hoping
that he could change.
Intoxicated by infatuation,
beguiled by his charm.
She was mesmerized,
as though he had done some incantation
to trap her!

His fondness for her
faded quickly,
after their wedding day.
He threw her aside
like an unwanted thing!
She was no longer
the object of his affection.
His aloofness
wounded her,
damaged her.
“How could life be so cruel?”
she thought.

Her dedication to him
was meaningless,
disposable!
He flaunted his women before her.
Her allegiance
slowly,
knowingly
started to fade,
and eventually
disintegrated.
The abandonment became too heavy.
She knew
she needed to escape
the torment.

“Could this really be love”
she wondered,
when they finally parted ways.
His vanity and philandering
had destroyed
what little trust she had.
The marriage she had hoped to save,
and fought so hard for,
crumbled,
and
died!