1980 - 1984

Randy Buckwhip met Fanny Buckwhip at his job of chief seagull clearer at The Corstorphine Showgrounds. Fanny was playing front row for the Caversham Bulldogs and they were 10-4 ahead against the Kia Toa Tigers when the pitch was suddenly invaded by a swarm of seagulls. Fanny was just about to pack down in the front row when Randy scooped up a ravenous gull in his arms that Fanny was about to mistake for the ball. Fanny was impressed. The attraction was instant. A few weeks later Fanny went to see Randy playing guitar at the Corstorphine Golf Club, where Randy was regaining confidence after “the incident”. They hooked up and Fanny ended up giving birth to Arty on the rugby field. A year or two later Benny was born on the same field, unfortunately for him though, his birth came at an important point in the game where the Bulldogs had been hard on defence. Fanny gave birth during the play the ball and the dummy-half mistook Benny for the ball and he was subsequently kicked into touch. Gary followed sometime later, and was born in prison as Fanny served time for domestic abuse. This is where Gary developed an obvious affection for the place.

During this time, Randy continued his love of country duets at The Golf Club until the fateful night when he sung a song with a woman named Pania, who worked as a rousie. One thing led to another, and Randy indulged in a night of passion. The two never saw each other again.