Catfish

What's the difference between a government handout and a helping hand? I guess it's in who's getting the money. For example, those getting food stamps and the like are often seen not as down-on-their-luck Americans but as lazy freeloaders. But if you're a farmer coping with this year's drought, well, I guess you're a different story. As The Times reported Monday : The U.S. Department of Agriculture announced Monday that it would buy up to $170 million of meat from affected livestock producers.

A trout plant at Lake Cachuma, many up to three pounds, highlighted action Wednesday in the Southern California reservoir fishing scene, with trolling and bait fishing both bringing good results. Trout limits were reported at several facilities, along with good catches of crappie and spotted catfish. WILLOW BEACH--Continued limits, with many hand-sized trout and one 4 1/2-pounder. LAKE MEAD--Most of the action has been in the lower basin, mostly all stripers.

The truth about Clear Lake: It isn't. Furthermore, said Terry Knight, a free-lance writer and fishing guide, "Although this lake is known across the country for its bass, catfish is by far the most popular form of fishing." And the crappie . . . To many anglers, the bass aren't even second. Around Clear Lake, it is sometimes difficult to separate legend from fact. There are tales of haunted houses built over ancient Pomo Indian burial grounds. Residents hear parties going on in the next room--until they go check.

Life at Harold Sparks' diner on Centinela Avenue in Inglewood frequently gets confused with art. Four years ago, for example, Sparks named his restaurant the Serving Spoon after a diner featured on his favorite television show, the afternoon soap opera "All My Children." A couple of years later, when a patron named Monique Shannon happened into the diner, Sparks successfully pleaded with her to come to work as a waitress. The reason? A Monique also slings hash at the soap-opera diner.

--Sarah Ferguson is the first future royal princess of the 20th Century who has not received one electrical appliance, not even a toaster, for a wedding gift, Burke's Peerage Publications in London says. But Ferguson and Prince Andrew, who will wed July 23, are not hurting for gifts.

Love's labors apparently haven't been lost. After an 18-month campaign to cut unprofitable operations, the money-losing Brea-based Love's Barbecue Restaurants chain finally expects to break even. And with the help of new ownership, some trendy new menu items and the return of its popular "When you're in Love's, the whole world's delicious" ad campaign, the 22-outlet company hopes to post a modest profit at the end of its fiscal year in June. The turnaround follows seven years of losses.

One of the world's largest blue catfish didn't get that way by dieting. Splash, a 121 1/2-pounder caught last January and donated to the Freshwater Fisheries Center in Athens, Texas, has an appetite worth its weight in fundraising. When someone dangled a dinner normally served to alligators -- raw chicken -- she scarfed it. The giant fish gulped eight drumstick-and-thigh meals per week but couldn't digest the bones, so she threw them up.

Casey Affleck and Joaquin Phoenix's much-debated mock documentary, "I'm Still Here," now revealed to be an utter fake, is just the latest example of a tsunami of entertainment that it is not at all what it seems. In fact, when you watch movies or TV today, it's hard to decide whether what you're seeing is real, fake or somewhere in the dramatic netherworld in between. TV is overrun with reality TV shows, which might be the least accurate genre moniker of all time, since virtually all reality TV shows are shaped, scripted and full of storylines that are just as complex and convoluted (and often just as preposterous)