HealthCare.gov is now working as promised, if you don’t know what words mean

President Barack Obama promised that the Best Website Ever would be fixed by December 1, 2013. And here’s the proof!

Courtesy of Newsbusters, here are some people whose names you don’t know because they’re on CNN in 2013:

If you like your crash, you can keep your crash.

This minor glitch seems easy enough to fix: Just stop testing HealthCare.gov! No testing, no crashing. After all, that’s what the Obama administration did. They didn’t test it, so the Republicans wouldn’t have any facts about it to point out.

In fact, that’s been the plan for the past 5 years, on every issue. Withhold information from the public, and/or actively put out false information — also known as lies — and then the peasants don’t have to worry about anything. Make one impossible promise after another, and then claim you made a different promise. It’s all good, America. Nothing bad can happen if you don’t know about it. Yay!

Update: “I think the president’s numbers will recover, I think people’s confidence will recover… I think he spoke directly to this and I think people accepted what he had to say. I think people trust this president.” Why would David Plouffe say such a thing if he didn’t genuinely believe it to be true?