I am hoping all of you can shed some light for me and help me, not so much to make a decision, but to guide me on a path, if that makes any sense. I am glad to be here, and I have read some of your stories, and I wish you all nothing but the best wishes and many baby blessings.

As someone on the outside looking in, so-to-speak, I wish all of you could have as many babies as you wanted. I am sorry things have not gone as planned or intended. I am sitting here crying and typing, overcome with emotion, empathy, and compassion. You see, my husband and I chose not to have children. It was a personal choice, among other things, and so here we are. The thing is, is that my sister has been trying to conceive for about three years now, unsuccessfully, sad to say. My sister is 45, and I am 38. She has asked me to be a donor, which I find to be the upmost honor. Helping her have a child she so very much wants would probably be the greatest thing I could ever do on this Earth.

I am also scared to death. Of the whole thing.

What if I produce the same results-i.e., old eggs that will not mature, or mature too much? Will it hurt (I am a wuss)? What about the high stress job I have (that I am trying to change)? Will that affect my ability to let my body do what it's supposed to naturally do monthly? I also smoke and drink a little (socially). How will that effect things?

If I go through with this, I want to make sure I take every precaution to provide the best possible results. And my sister has said politely that she is under a time constraint. So I feel a little pressured, and rightfully so. My sister is at the point of, if this is going to happen, let it happen, or we'll do something different. I guess maybe it's simple of me thinking in terms of performance, as in, I have one shot to get it right. Is this impatience talking? I don't know. I just want to help my sister if I can.

Thanks for listening. I hope I didn't post to the wrong thread. I know how frustrating that can be.

As for your eggs being old well... they are 38years old. Now...you won't know for sure if there "bad quality" until after ER & they spent a romantic night in the lab with your brother in laws sperm.

Will it hurt? Ummm yes it might. alittle. I'm on my way into ER tomrorrow morning so I will let you know then. I'm a big wuss too!

As for your J O B. Well I had to leave my high stressfull job this past Spring to pursue this quest of making a baby.

Now that doesn't happen to everyone. But keep in mind if your IVF clinic does not open before your work hours or after your going to need some extra time off here and there during the two weeks or so of this treatment.

Let me start by telling you how generous and courageous you are! You are doing something wonderful for your sister...

Well let's talk facts now!!! As the other ladies mentioned You need to stop smoking and drinking! And ideally you can reduce your working hours so you can rest and enjoy the process...which might be on its own stressful! at least emotionaly.

The IVF is not painful! When i did the ER they gave me anasthesia so I was asleep and when I woke up it was done but I had to rest and I took pain killers for couple of days!

It is nothing to be worried about! Just keep high hopes and be optimistic and I am sure things will go smooth!!!

Good luck...all the ladies in the site will be supporting you and never hesitate to ask anything no matter how silly it sounds...we have all been in the situation and we know how it feels....