You have come to the right place, and we are glad you are here. This is a safe place to share stories of love and loss, devastating grief, exhausting care-giving, memorials, advanced directives, mourning, hope, and despair. We want to hear about about what you wish you had known or done differently, what you wish those around you had known or done differently, and what went right. We will never tell you to move on or find closure.
"What cannot be said will be wept." Sappho

Monday, August 7, 2017

Rules for Social Media Posts on Death -- Let the Family Take the Lead

"When someone dies — whether suddenly or after a prolonged illness, via natural causes or an unnatural fate, a young person in their prime or an elderly person with more memories behind them than ahead — there is one universal truth : The ripples of people who are affected is vast and, at times, largely unknown to all other parties.
A death is always a gut punch with varying degrees of force and a reminder of our own mortality. Most people are moved to express their love for the deceased by showing their support to the family and friends left behind....This isn’t breaking news, and you’re not trying to scoop TMZ. Listen, I know you’re hurt. Guess what? Me too. I know you’re shocked. Guess what? Me too. Your social media is an extension of who you are. I get it. You “need” to express your pain, acknowledge your relationship with the deceased, and pray for the family.
Yes.
However...
Please give us a minute.
We are shocked.
We are heartbroken.
Give the immediate family or circle a little time to handle the immediate and time-sensitive “business” related to death. In the minutes and early hours after someone passes away, social media is most likely the last thing on their minds....I caution you to wait and then wait a little longer before posting anything. This may seem trivial, silly, and not worth talking about, but I promise you it isn’t.
If the person is married, let the spouse post first.
If the person is “young” and single, let the partner, parents, or siblings post first.
If the person is “old” and single, let the children post first.
If you can’t identify the family/inner circle of the person, you probably shouldn’t be posting at all."

About Me

This is a place to share stories of the end of life: care-giving, grief, loss, palliative care, legal and medical paperwork, living wills, funerals and memorials, condolence, bereavement, isolation, comfort, and hope. By sharing our stories, we learn, we grow, we make things better.