Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A vicious and shrewd plot came to me courtesy of a New York Times article today. The article in today's paper by Thomas Erdbrink reports that Iran as "unplugged" some computers in the powerful Oil Ministry Monday in response to a virus attacked which started Sunday and may have deleted data from the Ministry's servers.

The question that rocketed into my mind was this...who would be perpetrating these cyber-attacks on Iran?... Last year centrifuges used to enrich Uranium for Iran's nuclear program were attacked by a virus called "Stuxnet". Although Israeli officials were giddy with the viruses success, no perpetrator of the attacks has come forward.

Applying the "cui bono" (who benefits?) logic to this article had my mind warping together a possibly scheme that will change warfare as we know it, and it is being tested on Iran as we speak.

Who would benefit from the attacking of the Iranian nuclear program is easy and the list is long. The US and Israel lead Western powers against Iranian interests. Clearly the security of Israel is at least symbolically protected by the active attacking of Iran's nuclear aspirations.

But who would benefit from a successful attack against Iran's Oil Ministry is slightly more complicated. The US government benefits in any situation where Iran's vulnerability comes to the surface, especially after the two countries' recently strained relationship. The price of oil will undoubtedly be affected by the incident, or at least OPEC will use it as a pretense to magically elevate the already-criminal price of crude oil. And if there is one certainty about anything in this global economy, oil is always big business.

My first thought was it is child's play for a NSA attack to cripple centrifuges used to enrich uranium, or send a virus to disrupt the oil industry in a country George W. Bush described as one leg of "The Axis of Evil".

But then I rethought the shrewd nature of the US government. Surely if they were involved it would be in a less direct and conspicuous way, someone else would definitely be left holding the bucket if the plan went to shit somehow. A clear option would be for the NSA or CIA to enlist known hackers to the cause using either the threat of federal hacking charges on those already under investigation, or cold hard cash to the free hacker groups living in the shadows. Using hackers would give the the government deniability if shit hit the fan.

Even better cover for a government-hacker pact against Iran is the vast press coverage given to hacker groups such as Anonymous. Viewed by internet-dwellings as protectors of internet freedom, the hacking groups are direct foils to the government, making an agreement between the two seem ridiculous.

This is a grim hypothetical on a day when the New Orleans Saints are being dragged through the mud for allegedly recording opposing coaches from 2002-04, on top of the bounty scandal of a month ago.

I think it's safe to assume Roger Gooddell is poised to drop the hammer on one team for two offenses most contending teams probably have perpetrated blatantly for years. Now, thanks to precedents established by Major League Baseball and government oversight of sport, the FBI is involved in the soon-to-be coronated "Tape-Gate" which will be added to the list of "Bounty-Gate" and "Spy-Gate". The mileage sports gets out of Watergate references is shocking.

Back to the matter at hand, Iran. I think that Us involvement in the attacks against Iran in some way can be taken for granted. The talks between Iran and Western powers has been almost as infalmmatory as that posturing midget in North Korea.

More importantly these attacks show a new direction in warfare the US may take to combat terrorists and other nations. A vile march into Tehran by the US Marine Corps would certainly be made easier if every military server in Iran was melted to the consistency of scrambled eggs due to some super-virus the NSA is spawning. The effect would be a new type of "total war".

This "Total Electronic War" would see the blitzkrieg-like US Air Force bombs preceded by strategic cyber-attacks to disrupt key military communications. Nations, especially non-Westernized ones, would find these cyber-attacks as crippling as any ordinance.

Is it so hard to imagine the US government hiring hackers to help develop cyber-weaponry? This is the same government with a track record of outsourcing to organized crime and assorted criminals throughout US history. It is logical that if the CIA or NSA need a virus, they would reach out to hackers who regularly attack corporate sites. If you can't employ the best, then hire them out from the lowest reaches of the internet.

The Hacker Army

From the other side of the coin could hackers, the "Robin Hood's" of the internet, protectors of free information and enemies of exploitative corporations, sell-out to the Department of Defense?

Well, in many cases they might not have much of a choice. Most people can relate to choosing working for the enemy over a federal indictment on hacking charges. The government may even become bold and reach out to known hackers that aren't up on charges. These, the true capitalist swine among hackers, would jump at the deep pockets of Uncle Sam.

Better to make a mountain of money working as a "government consultant" or "contractor" than rot in a prison cell. On top of access to the NSA's super-computers, and every luxury they could "need" to help develop cyber-weapons for deployment against Iran and others would be made available.

It is a scary time, and even scarier still if the public or media ever catch on to the persistent cyber-attacks against Iran and the most likely source of these attacks. Somewhere in a government facility an ex-internet freedom fighter is creating the newest virus to be tested against the evil flavor-of-the-day, Iran.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

If you haven't been watching the 2012 NHL Playoffs then you are missing out. Game after game for the past week has been full of scoring and fighting. I mean come on, compared to the meaningless daily void of April baseball season and whatever mind-numbing dumbass sports are on the Stanley Cup Playoffs are the shit.

I mean a women's basketball draftee was on ESPN yesterday, so you know they're digging for anything. The Flyers Penguins series alone has been non-stop face-smashing and goal-scoring. Patrick Elias, that old fuck, is continuing his beastly season to try and get the Devils back on top. And as of right now the Bruins grinded out a 2-1 lead in their hard-hitting series against the Caps.

Watching this awesome hockey has led me to question why the fuck Americans don't watch more hockey? I mean baseball before August is so boring and meaningless it makes me want to cave my skull in with a rock. And the NBA Playoffs start soon but I know none of you watch that besides me.

During the playoffs about 75% of goals scored are ridiculous and though normally the referees make it a point to not allow brawling for the playoffs, this year all bets are off. People getting duffed all over the place. The Penguins and Flyers racked up 150 penalty minutes including what during the 3rd period turned out to be a 20 minute intermission so about seven different face-thrashings could resolve. Even Sidney "The Pussfart" Crosby tried to be tough, in a 2v1. The game also included 12 goals.

Bottom line is, if you aren't at least watching some hockey for the next few weeks, you are an idiot.

Friday, April 13, 2012

"Death comes at you no matter what you do in this life, and to equate drugs with death is a facile comparison."
-Jerry Garcia

The idea that the mind free from chemicals is the best mind is at the heart of societies ingrained fear of drugs. The idea that a person is born with "normal" chemicals in their brain and outside ones should only be administered if there are deficiencies is a very conservative bent on the mystical organ of human thought and cognition.

The altering of neurophysiology is something to be explored by the brave psychonaut.

If a doctor can prescribe strong narcotics for physical and mental illness as slight as not being able to sleep, why not be able to try and make the spirit more whole by exploring the inner reaches of the brain and soul. If the average human can only harness 10% of their brain power then why should we make war against the use of chemicals to explore that 90% of the unknown. If space and the deep sea are both considered "final frontiers", why shouldn't the unknown super-computer held up by our chicken-neck be considered one as well?

Why would something native cultures use, like DMT-based Ayahuasca in South America and peyote buttons in Central America, to have spiritual experiences be shunned as archaic and backwards and pagan?

The Hallucinogenic cactus, Peyote

If there was a hallucinatory rite in Christendom would our ideas about these chemicals be different? I would say drastically so.

If Jesus had a taste for the potent hashish or opium I'm sure the bias of the Christian world would sway people in a different direction as far as acceptance of drug use.

It's not to say that all drugs are spiritually useful, even a firm libertarian might cringe at my ideal that all substances should be legal from consumption.

The simple question to ask yourself is "Would I shoot heroin if it was legal?" Most people would probably answer no to that question. But some would certainly try it, and it is in my mind an inalienable right for someone to have the freedom to do so unless their use or abuse of the drug affects others directly. Why should governments dictate what we put into our own bodies?

Instead drugs like heroin are used as foils to the drugs that pharmaceutical lobbyists and doctors prescribe to us that may act just like heroin (Oxycontin) or speed (Adderall), and in fact contain the same chemicals as illegal street drugs. But prescription drugs are hoisted onto a pedestal as "safe" even though no doctor is immune from misdiagnosing a condition, and of course the FDA would never let a dangerous drug slip through the cracks because the company producing it spent a billion dollars to do so. So our children are given speed and their parents are given narcotic sleep aides to sleep for the entire night. And the line separating "good drugs" from "bad drugs" is carved into stone.

Studies are beginning to reveal that prescription drugs can be far more deadly and addicting than illegal drugs, and coke sales don't profit Phizer. It is estimated that over 75% of college students use prescription ADD/ADHD medications like Adderall (amphetamines) and Ritalin (Methylphenidate) to help their studies.

Another argument for the legalization, regulation, and taxation of drugs is the purity factor. When I was in elementary school the D.A.R.E. (Dare Abuse Resistance Education) officer scared us by telling as "we wouldn't know what we were getting" from a drug dealer. Years later I laugh at the prospect of getting marijuana that is tainted at all, it is easy to spot any sort of inconsistencies with real marijuana. And most people can identify marijuana easily. But hard drugs are an entirely different story. Coke and MDMA can be cut with any number of things; other drugs such as speed, or baby laxative and more harmless fillers.

The average high school student cannot identify common cutters in their Ecstasy, the booming drug of our generation. The raver is a mainstream youth image, electronic music fills the radio stations 24/7. The younger people are just emulating the experienced ravers they here about and see at concerts. They take our lead into drug use. When I was in high school prescription painkillers were new on the scene and easy to get, but now "rolls", "skittles", and "beans" are all over my old high school.

The times are changing. Snorting "bath salts" is all the rage. Fake marijuana like K-2; a direct result of the prevalence of the most hated weapons of the law; the drug test, is flying off the shelves as the DEA pushes it up the noses of monkeys to correctly classify, and ban, these synthetics as fast as possible. In a sense, a plant has been outlawed only to be replaced by a more dangerous synthetic substitute directly as a result of U.S. drug policy.

And the financial benefits of legalizing, regulating, and taxing drugs that generate billions of dollars annually are obvious. Take the cash from the black market and use it to fund our bloated government, that could lose the cash infusion.

Peoples' initial reaction, carefully crafted by our government, to drugs is an authoritarian one. The government can't tell me not to own a gun, but evil drugs?! No one should be able to enjoy them at all. The FDA is probably the most treacherous federal agency besides the IRS/DEA potent tandem that crushes everything in its path.

The one fact that undermines the drug war the U.S. government insists on fighting is this: people want to alter their consciousness, and the enforcement of law is barely an afterthought. Every drug bust leaves a dealer's competitors with a higher demand for their product. The laws of economics trumps the laws of society almost every time. Until it is less profitable for a kid in an urban ghetto to sell cocaine than get a "real" job, the drug war will never be over. Demand will never die for drugs in the U.S. or the world.

But why is this seemingly unquenchable desire for humans to experiment with chemicals viewed as dangerous? Surely holistic medicine is the result of centuries of experimentation with various healing methods. Experimentation with cause and effect is the basis of science as we understand it. Ask any scientist how he came to his or her breakthroughs in their field, they test and experiment and repeat until they find a suitable result. Science brought us drugs like LSD and MDMA anyway, so why deny that progress in civilization leads to an increasing dialogue on drugs, as drug companies crank out newer, more effective prescription drugs to help us sleep, get erections, and focus on work.

It is also prudent to mention that almost all now-illegal drugs have roots in legal medical practices and remedies. Not even a hundred years ago cocaine and heroin were both available over-the-counter in drug stores across the country. The reason the practice failed in the early days was the public was not educated to the risks of the ingredients in the remedies. Surely a well-regulated and taxed drug industry would involve labels and classifications of every single type of drug available.

The point is a basic one; how can on one hand our government put some substances out of our reach and with the other force feed us other, sometimes more addicting and volatile and less-researched than the "street drugs" they replace?

The Florida DA and special prosecutor waited weeks to charge Zimmerman and the reason for this delay, which is open for speculation, will decide the outcome.

If the delay was due to lack of evidence and weeks of police work turning up nothing than it could be a very scary trial. Some speculate the charges are solely a result of national pressure though the prosecutors strong deny these claims. If it turns out the prosecutor is lying than the trial will be a real circus in the same pulsing vein as the OJ Simpson trial, even the Scopes-Monkey debacle.

If however the delay was merely a means for the DA and prosecutors to build some sort of case against Zimmermann, then the circus will have a much more foreboding tone. There are after all career on the line for the prosecution. Knowing this trial will be a monster, I would hope they are competent enough to not completely embarrass themselves. Public outcry if Zimmerman is acquitted will be worse than the OJ outcry.

OJ SImpson at least was exposed to the public in a positive way before his trial, Zimmerman does not have that advantage. The world is just learning about George Zimmerman, and so far the odds are the so-called court of public opinion has already condemned him.

Whatever the reason for the delay of the charges, this trial will be a hot button issue for the next 5 years at least.

In a strange, surely taken out of context quote, President Obama stated "If I had a son, he'd look like Trayvon." Talk about lack of context. My first tought is the impression Obama is likening Trayvon to his son to voice his deep disapproval of Zimmerman's actions. Killing a person who, if he had a son, would resemble the President's offspring? Blasphemy! String him up on the White House lawn!

This trial will bring into the limelight a self-defense law known as the "stand your ground" law. The law is normally only relevant if a citizen murders a home invader they believe is in the act of committing a felony. In Florida, the law (passed by unanimous vote in the Florida legislature) includes incidents in public, not just one's home.

776.012 Use of force in defense of person.—A person is justified in using force, except deadly force, against another when and to the extent that the person reasonably believes that such conduct is necessary to defend himself or herself or another against the other’s imminent use of unlawful force. However, a person is justified in the use of deadly force and does not have a duty to retreat if:

(1) He or she reasonably believes that such force is necessary to prevent imminent death or great bodily harm to himself or herself or another or to prevent the imminent commission of a forcible felony; or

The law has Libertarian roots but it is already the subject of heated debate after the Trayvon Martin case brought the national eye to the law.

I tend to agree with the home invasion law. If anyone were to come into my home committing felonious acts every which way, a gun in their face would seem reasonable. But some may disagree and think that just calling in the mounties would somehow prevent the intruder from destroying your home, raping your wife, and beating you with the rotten salami sitting in the fridge for the last three months.

In any case, this trial has grave implication in Florida and the other handful of state where "stand your ground" laws exist. It will be interesting to see how it turns out. These laws may find themselves under Supreme Court scrutiny when all is said and done.

From Newser:Did you enjoy the dot-com bubble? Well, expect a replay on an even bigger scale, because last week President Obama signed a bill that, according to Matt Taibbi of Rolling Stone, "will very nearly legalize fraud in the stock market." The JOBS Act is ostensibly designed to make it easier for startups, particularly tech companies, to raise money, but it's actually a "sweeping piece of deregulation" that "appears to have been specifically written to encourage fraud."

Perhaps its most jaw-dropping provision exempts companies from independent accounting for five years. "This is like formally eliminating steroid testing for the first five years of a baseball player's career. … You'd better be ready to stick a lot asterisks in the record books." There's just no reason an honest company would want to do that, and would-be billion-dollar companies claiming they can't afford accountants "sounds like a comedy routine." This move should wipe out any Occupy cred Obama had, Taibbi says; "Boss Tweed himself couldn't have done worse."

Well here we go Obama fans. A huge pro big business bill signed into law by yours truly, President Obama. I mean the act will spur small business startups (hopefully) but at the top levels it doesn't work. The bill essentially allows large companies with upcoming IPO's (becoming a publicly traded company) to phase in SEC regulations instead of being slammed with them all at once. It's stupid. If you think the problem in the economy is that the government too strictly regulates business, you are insane. The problem is that the government can no longer control major companies and banks in America. So they run rough-shot on our politics and whatever else they want to get their hands in. Great, change the world my ass Obama.

Alright, straight-up I love Ozzie Guillen. I think that in a sea of boring baseball managers, he is always good for some excitement. And now he's suspended, again.

From ESPN:MIAMI -- The Miami Marlins have suspended manager Ozzie Guillen for five games for comments he made in which he expressed admiration for Cuban leader Fidel Castro.

"The Marlins acknowledge the seriousness of the comments attributed to Guillen," the team said in a prepared statement announcing the move. "The pain and suffering caused by Fidel Castro cannot be minimized especially in a community filled with victims of the dictatorship."

Marlins bench coach Joey Cora will be the interim manager during the suspension.

Speaking first in Spanish on Tuesday morning in Miami, Guillen apologized to the city, its Cuban-American community and all Latin Americans for the comments, which were published on Time magazine's website last week.

According to ESPN's translation of his comments in Spanish. "I am here to say I am sorry with my heart in my hands and I want to say I'm sorry to all those people who are hurt indirectly or directly."

Ozzie giveth no fucks

Look I get that Guillen had to be suspended. I mean coming out in favor of that last bastion of Communism in a sport where most of the players have some connection to the Caribbean or Cuba. You just can't do that. But I mean let's be real if it wasn't for Ozzie, baseball would be just above competitive chess in terms of entertainment.

Keep on being you Ozzie, but keep in mind supporting dictators is frowned upon in most societies.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

The Chicago Blackhawks are putting the screws to a Detriot team unable to compete with the graceful Chicago team. The Blackhawk’s coordinated touch passing makes Detriot look even older than they already are. There are some dangerous Indians out there in Illinois. Red Wing possessions are far between and uncoordinated. The stiff fore-check they face only allows for solo dances toward the net by the nimblest Red Wing players. If Datsyuk can’t get through, then Detriot is doomed.

45 seconds left and a sudden 2-2 tie sees the sharpshooters of the Red Wings pull even with the Blackhawks on a scorching between the leg pass to Datsyuk who was waiting to drop the puck right into the twine. Five hours to story time and I’m neither drunk nor stoned, catch up will be swift and complete.

3:45 Blunt rolled and rum poured. The hockey shootout gave Chicago some justice when puck-meister Datsyuk went between his legs and failed to regain enough control of the puck to score.

Saturday around 4:30 I was wondering what the legacy of the 2012 Masters would be. Could Tiger Woods make it two back-to-back wins for his fifth green jacket? More likely by 11PM EST tomorrow Tiger will be holed up in the Palms in Vegas doing a potent cocaine-Viagramix off a naïve pornstar’s ass while Lee Westwood or Fred Couples’ is given the coveted jacket in Georgia.

Tiger now sits watching from +3 (he went even with the course today when leaders are making -5 type monstrous climbs) as the other players finish. He is probably on the phone with his agent demanding the stocking of his secret Vegas harem with drugs, women, and a putting surface fitted in his suite.

Phil “Lefty” Mickelson seems more likely to pull out a Sunday run, but the young guns may knock him off yet. The strong swings of the young players provide the long drives necessary to shorten the unforgiving Augusta National fairways.

The old guard may pack it in after this, forced out of relevance by the young guns who take advantage of the high purses Woods and Mickelson have earned for the sport, but Freddy Couples and Phil Mickelson want their share of the 8 million up for grabs tomorrow. But the greens abuse everyone regardless of age.

ESPN 2 has a collegiate lumberjack competition on, Jesus. “Springboard” is an event involving cutting into a tree enough to allow a plank to stand about three feet off the ground. Then the contestant stabs a plank into the first tree-slit, and cuts another slit for three steps. Then, at the top of the tree, the contestant must cut the top piece off the tree faster than the other competitor. Oh no, Night at the Roxbury is on as well. It’s a psychotic television trifecta, with rum as its lubricant.

Back to Phil begging his tee shot to cut. Watching the golfer beg his ball to cooperateis why the Masters is popular, the duffer can relate to the pro being beaten around by Augusta because the duffer gets abused by his local par 29. And Westwood misses a one foot putt to lose a share of the lead. The youth is frustrated.

In Collegiate log-cutting a bearded competitor almost put a ten foot tooth-sawinto his knee. It only glanced off and he hobbled off.

Will Ferrell is one of the greatest comic actors of all time.

My congestion right now is getting unbearable. Tiger will have seriously clean sinuses after his impending binge/sex relapse.

5:04 PMLefty shares the lead with three others after thirteen. He is clearly feeling it, whipper-snapper uppity kids be damned.

T minus two hours to story time. More rum and golf and boredom!

Phil is really putting the pedal to the floorboard now. Knowing he’ll contend with youngin’s and Couples tomorrow instead of a revitalized “Old” Tiger 1.0 gives him confidence. A few nice scotch and sodas after his round tonight and he’ll be ready for war tomorrow. The old vet learns the course quickly while the young guns just fire down the fairway with drivers and fly around the greens with shots fueled by pure quick adrenaline.

6 o'clock and I think we’ll switch off the brutal final minutes of the golf until tomorrow’s final round. The biggest golf day of the year, the jacket.

For now, Phil gets a standing ovation on his walk up the 18th fairway, if he can repeat this scene tomorrow, it will taste all the sweeter.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Dustin Johnson knows it. Today Johnson anounced he will not play in the Masters because of some bullshit injury.

From ESPN:AUGUSTA, Ga. -- Dustin Johnson, the 12th-ranked player in the world, will miss the Masters because of a back injury, he tweeted on Tuesday.

"First I have to apologize to the fans and sponsors. With heartfelt regret, I won't be playing in the Masters due to a tweaked back," Johnson wrote.

The five-time PGA Tour winner underwent offseason knee surgery immediately after the Presidents Cup in November and got off to a slow start in 2012, although he tied for fourth at the Feb. 16-19 Northern Trust Open and was tied for ninth at the WGC-Accenture Match Play the week after.

His last tournament was the WGC-Cadillac Championship at Doral, where he tied for 35th on March 11.

His agent, David Winkle at Hambric Sports Management, said Johnson first had back pain in January when he withdrew from the Humana Challenge, and played through minor pain the next six weeks.

The first guy to run from this weekend's impending "Hurricane Tiger"

Dustin, we all get it. You don't want to be embarrassed by Tiger like everyone else.It's a smart plan, he's going to fuck the whole field up like it's six years ago. And he'll throw on that green jacket and give a rousing speech about how having sex with whores made him the man he is. A Winner.

Just don't lie and make up and injury. I can smell Johnson's fear all the way from Georgia.

From Newser:You can stop studying those dictionaries, prospective journalism students at UNC, because the school has finally acknowledged the existence of spell check. The University of North Carolina school of journalism has officially retired the spelling portion of the spelling and grammar test all students must take, reports the Daily Tar Heel (as spotted by Jim Romenesko's blog). It's the first change to the test since the 1970s.

"What we’re trying to do is just make the exam more relevant for today’s journalism and mass communication students," a senior associate dean said. In place of the spelling section, the school will substitute a word usage section designed to emphasize mistakes computers are less adept at catching. "Spell check can tell you whether 'their' is spelled correctly, but not if it's the right word," one associate professor explained.

For the love of all things holy. I'm not saying that college should have spelling tests but is it really that much of a stretch to see how well journalism students can spell. Let's be realistic, if they got rid of spelling in like elementary school because of all the little rich fucks running around with iPhones we will be a race of retards.

I mean shit people do still write by fucking hand and need to know how to spell shit. For fuck's sake a journalist that doesn't write by hand in a notebook or something is a full-on clown anyway. What are they teaching down at UNC? Blogging 101, no need for spelling or evin noing enlische. I mean it's only a top public school in the nation. Can't spell? No biggie.

This morning IRS and DEA agents raided Oaksterdam University in Oakland, the brain-child of Richard Lee, a leader in the marijuana legalization community. The school educates people who hope to enter the industry of medical marijuana in California.

From High Times:In an action both stunning and predictable given the current climate of medical marijuana in California, federal agents from the DEA, IRS, and U.S. Marshals Service raided Oaksterdam University on Monday at approximately 7:30 a.m. PST.

Later that morning hundreds of protesters gathered in front of the barricaded school in downtown Oakland going face-to-face with federal agents and cops (agents were aided in the raid by the Oakland Police Department). Dozens more officers were inside Oaksterdam seizing evidence that they later hauled into a waiting semi-trailer truck - including lighting gear, boxes, files, and 30 garbage bags stuffed with medicine and plants in various stages of growth.

Four Oaksterdam employees were inside the facility when federal agents arrived with a search warrant shortly after sunrise. None were reportedly arrested, but only detained and then released by the agents. Oaksterdam University founder Richard Lee was at his residence Monday morning when the feds broke down his door (apparently because the wheelchair-bound Lee didn’t answer their pounding quickly enough).

Lee was also allegedly detained but not arrested according to second-hand reports from reputable sources on the scene. Lee was allegedly instructed by personal confidantes to maintain a low profile during the subsequent raid protest and did not appear. The feds reportedly raided other Lee-rented properties in the area and confiscated evidence from those sites as well...

After the incident a protest broke out over the arrests including many who were openly smoking pot in front of the federal agents.

Look, this was going to happen sooner or later. The key here is that Lee wasn't arrested. This is a huge event for the marijuana legalization in the United States. Will Oaksterdam still hold classes and function in spite of probably pending charges or at least a heavy fine from the feds? I hope so, because education is legitimacy and if medical marijuana education gets squashed then we will be set back even farther from legal marijuana.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Jesus this shit is nuts. Saw it over on Bromygod and had to put it up. Most people remember when Tony Hawk banged out the first ever 900 on a skateboard. Well, move over Tony because this little fucker Tom Schaar can shred.

Just wait until this little dude hits puberty, he's going to be the Shaun White of skateboarding for like the next 25 years. That's a fact. I will say though it's probably easier to spin fast as fuck when you are like 4 feet tall and weigh like 110lbs.

Then what are you waiting for? For the past month Sundays at 8 Discovery channel has been blowing minds like a blowjob from Sasha Grey.

The show is an extension of the Planet Earth series except it is all about the Arctic and Antarctic. Penguins, seals, bison, wolves, they got it all. For a little taste of what the show is all about go here.

Haters gunna hate

Shows like these amaze me because the animals and plants they show live in the harshest conditions on Earth and they thrive in the cold. Sure there are a couple scenes your girlfriend will hate, like watching the painful and bloody process of grey wolves taking down a bison for lunch, but that's what the fuck animals do. They eat each other.

Oh and the show is narrated by Alec Baldwin which seems like a weird choice but oddly enough he is like a poor-man's Morgan Freeman.

Bottom line is whatever shitty stuff you have going on at 8 this Sunday whether it's homework or moving a small illegal animal species across the country to a collector in Colorado, take an hour and get your mind blown by the sheer ridiculousness of the north and south poles and the cool animals that live there.

Honestly my week is already fucked knowing that Akon is dead. I found out way later than everyone else because I haven't been on my computer 24/7 over the weekend like usual.

Every drink I have for the next month will be for Akon, RIP.

Oh and what the fuck is up with Akon having AIDS?Should I have known that? Did he know it? I thought the Magic Johnson method of destroying AIDS, AKA being rich, worked every time? I think this is some sort of conspiracy to strike right at the core of hip hop and kill the dude with the most unique voice of all.