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Now that Jessica Simpson‘s in the middle of her latest hotnesscomeback, I was kinda hoping we’d be treated to a better view than this of her leaving the airport. I mean, sure, I see her legs, but where’s her trademark cleavage? Speaking for all us true Jessica Simpson fans out there, that’s what we were really hoping to see. Oh well, maybe next time.

Jessica Simpson has shared new photos of Maxwell, 22 months, and Ace, 9 months, via Instagram. Last Tuesday (March 18) she published a snapshot of her daughter drawing with chalk outside alongside the caption: “Maxi drawing circles in her @jessicasimpsonstyle sweater. I love being able to see her in the brand. It melts my heart!”

Also on that day Maxwell and her nanny were seen walking around Calabasas Commons.

In another photo Jessica posted two weeks ago – she writes of Ace and Eric Johnson, “My men at the playground.”

Last month Simpson told Good Morning America what she eats while on her Weight Watchers diet.

She shared, “For breakfast I am an oatmeal girl. Lunch, I do like bread, so I will have a sandwich or something. But for dinner I try to keep it super clean.”

On Valentine’s Day Simpson’s daughter Maxwell was seen out shopping at the Calabasas Commons with her nanny. The toddler held onto her doll for the trip out.

According to E! News – on Monday’s Good Morning America Simpson said she felt “so insecure” about her pregnancy weight.

“I couldn’t even believe what I weighed. I don’t think that I ever expected myself to see the numbers that I have seen on the scale.”

She added, “You are creating a life, and honestly it’s not easy. It is a really hard thing to go through. And you deserve to eat your ice cream, you deserve to have your pancakes. Do whatever you want to do and then afterwards just know that you have to work really hard.”

“My first pregnancy I ate a lot more,” she continued. “But my second pregnancy I ate enough. Like, I ate what I wanted to eat, but I stayed active and I think because I had gained so much weight with my first that I had to stay active throughout my second because I didn’t know what to do with myself if I didn’t.”

“Love this lil lady more than anything!” the singer-entrepreneur, 33, captioned a shot giving her daughter a kiss on the cheek via her new Instagram account.

Earlier this week, the proud mom shared another photo of her tot bandaged up with a sweet Hello Kitty Bandaid.

“Maxi got a boo boo but her baby blues are beautiful,” the I Wanna Love You Forever singer tweeted.

In addition to posting pics of her gorgeous girl, Jessica also shared a “family moment” with her younger sister Ashlee Simpson and her new fiancé Evan Ross.

In the picture, Jessica is smiling in between the young couple and showing off Ashlee’s new engagement ring. Ashlee, 29, announced on Monday (January 13) that she is engaged to Diana Ross‘ 25-year-old son.

“My snuggle bug…” the singer-actress-entreprneur, 33, tweeted Saturday. In the black and white snapshot, Ace gazes up at the camera while sitting on a swing.

The former Fashion Star mentor – engaged to former football star Eric Johnson, 34, and also mom to 19-month-old daughter Maxwell - is a spokesperson for Weight Watchers.

“I am just one of those pregnant women who gains a lot of weight,” Simpson previously told Us. “I have really big boobs. I have my curves. Even trying as hard as I did with Ace, I still gained — definitely not as much as with Maxwell, but still a significant amount.”

As for her New Year’s resolution, Jessica said 2014 will bring some exciting news.

“The new year will definitely bring on the wedding bells, which is exciting…I think it’s about time,” she shared. “Knowing that I have the wedding coming up is an incentive to stay on Weight Watchers, count my points and stay in the gym. I mean, when you see my dress, you’ll know.”

Jessica Simpon‘s fiancé Eric Johnson was photographed with their 4-month-old son Ace Knute at Los Angeles International Airport on Friday (November 22). Sporting denim and shades, the former NFL star toted his tot who was dressed in a plaid shirt and vest, paired by some sweet UGGs.

Last Friday, Eric stepped out for some bonding time with the couple’s 18-month-old daughter Maxwell. The pair headed to the Calabasas Commons to pick up some burgers and milkshakes from Johnny Rockets.

Jessica recently opened up about her “very scary” pregnancy weight gain and subsequent postpartum weight loss. After the May 1, 2012 birth of Maxwell, the singer-entrepreneur lost 70 lbs. with the help of Weight Watchers, only to learn she was pregnant with her second child.

Now, she’s once again a spokeswoman for Weight Watchers.

“When I had Maxwell I gained a lot of weight. More than I thought I would,” Jessica shared. ”And when it came time to try to take it off, it felt overwhelming. Stepping on the scale and seeing that number was really scary.”

She added: “With a toddler on the run and an infant to look after. I knew I needed a plan that’s simple and fits into my life, along with the support that’s so important to my success. I know Weight Watchers works, so I got on the plan again.”

We’re taking a look at Hollywood’s back-to-back baby boom. From Megan Fox, to Britney Spears, to Jessica Simpson, let’s see which star moms are making their kids close in age.

Megan Fox:

Handsome couple Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green welcomed their first child, son Noah, on September 27, 2012.

Less than one year later (in August 2013), they announced their second pregnancy.

Brian recently admitted he’s not sure how they’ll manage juggling a toddler, a new baby, and his job on Anger Management.

“We honestly have no idea and we discuss it daily and think, ‘How are we going to do this?’” he admitted. “I think we’ll see when it happens. People do it all the time.”

But it sounds like his boss, Charlie Sheen, is more than understanding.

“I couldn’t really ask for a better situation than that,” Brian, also dad to 11-year-old son Kassius, said. “[Charlie's] one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met and worked with.”

Britney Spears:

Oops, she did it again!

Pop superstar Britney Spears and ex-husband Kevin Federline welcomed their two sons one year apart — almost to the day.

The couple’s firstborn son, Sean Preston, was born on September 14, 2005, and their second son, Jayden James, arrived on September 12, 2006.

Reportedly, Britney wanted to schedule her second C-section birth to coincide with Sean Preston’s birthday, but her then-husband persuaded her to move the date back a couple days.

Tori Spelling:

Currently, Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott have two 1-year-olds — and they’re not twins!

One month after their third child, daughter Hattie, was born, Tori got the unexpected news that she was pregnant for the fourth time.

“The new baby was clearly unplanned but I am thrilled and I would have lots of babies if I could, I love being a mom,” Tori said at the time of her fourth pregnancy.

“All my friends keep asking me [if it was planned] and I’m like, ‘Seriously? Hattie was one month old. Do you think it was planned?’” she continued. “I was up all night with feedings.”

“The doctor said, ‘Wait six weeks [to have sex],’ and Dean was like, ‘They tell everyone that.’ We didn’t wait that long with Stella or Liam,” Tori added. “I was like, ‘Well, I don’t want him to think that the sex is going downhill,’ so now we’re on baby No. 4.”

Son Finn arrived on August 30, 2012, while Hattie was born on October 10, 2011.

Jessica Simpson:

Just seven months after Jessica Simpson welcomed her first child, daughter Maxwell, in May 2012, she and fiancé Eric Johnson confirmed that baby No. 2 was on the way.

“Pregnancy is a lot,” Jessica recently shared. “It was hard to do two so close together. I have this huge sense of accomplishment, and I feel in my heart that I’m done. But obviously, accidents do happen!”

Son Ace Knute was born on June 30, 2013, and Maxwell arrived on May 1, 2012.

Naomi Watts:

Naomi Watts and her partner Liev Schreiber welcomed their two sons within 17 months of each other.

The couple’s first son, Alexander “Sasha” Pete, was born on July 25, 2007, and their second son, Samuel “Kai,” arrived on December 13, 2008.

“I suppose I might consider having another child — if someone could guarantee me it would be a girl,” Naomi said.

“Two boys can be a lot to handle and sometimes you think it would be easier with two girls playing with their tea sets and dolls,” she added. “But Liev loves having two boys.”

Fashion Star mentor Jessica Simpson stepped out with fiancé Eric Johnson and their daughterMaxwell, 16 months, in Calabasas, Calif. on Saturday (August 31). For the second time this week, the trio enjoyed dinner at the Sagebrush Cantina.

The new mom-of-two, 33, recently introduced their beautiful baby boy, Ace Knute, on the cover of Us Weekly.

The singer-turned-entrepreneur is planning to slow down on the deliveries.

“Pregnancy is a lot. It was hard to do two so close together,” she shared. “I have this huge sense of accomplishment, and I feel in my heart that I’m done. But obviously, accidents do happen!”

After briefly chatting with some friends, the trio were seen leaving Sagebrush Cantina for a bite to eat.

The busy parents did not bring their newborn son, Ace Knute, on the outing.

The Fashion Star mentor, 33, introduced their beautiful baby boy on the cover of Us Weekly.

“With two kids, we have our hands full, but every day is a new adventure,” Jessica, who gave birth to Ace via planned C-section on June 30, told the mag. “It’s fun! I feel very at peace with being a mom.”

In true Jessica style, the singer-turned-entrepreneur accidentally spilled the beans on her baby’s gender. “The crazy thing is I never knew a wiener could make me nauseous,” she joked, and added, “Well, I guess I just told the world that I’m having a boy!”

A recent survey found that more half of American women were considered the primary breadwinners in the family. So let’s take a look at 10 celebrity moms who cash in at higher levels than their partners, from Jessica Alba, to Julia Roberts, to Gwen Stefani.

Jessica Alba:

Jessica Alba – mom of daughters Honor, 4, and Haven, 1 – has an estimated net worth of $20 million. While her husband Cash Warren is a Yale graduate and film producer, Jessica rakes in millions for her movie roles, and is now the co-owner of the Honest Company.

But Jessica is sure to give her lower-earning husband credit for her ongoing success. “My husband Cash has been integral in my development as an entrepreneur,” she said.

Bethenny Frankel:

Former Real Housewives of New York star and SkinnyGirl Cocktails founder, Bethenny Frankel, pulled in a cool $12 million last year. The television star and entrepreneur – mom of 3-year-old daughter Bryn – has an estimated net worth of $25 million.

Bethenny’s estranged husband, Jason Hoppy, has a much lower income as a pharmaceutical rep. Perhaps this was an issue in their “miserable” and short marriage?

Gwen Stefani:

British rockstar Gavin Rossdale and his band, Bush, broke up in 2002. But his rocker wife, Gwen Stefani, continues to be the frontwoman of No Doubt. And not to mention, she created her successful clothing line, L.A.M.B.

In 2008 alone, the mom-of-two earned $27 million. With an estimated net worth of $80 million, the mom of Kingston, 7, and Zuma, 4, really knows how to rake in the dough.

Drew Barrymore:

With her acting career and successful production company Flower Films, Drew Barrymore earned $12 in 2009. And her estimated net worth is a whopping $125 million.

Although Drew’s new husband, Will Kopelman, is an art advisor and no stranger to wealth (he is the son of former Chanel CEO Arie Kopelman), his paychecks pale in comparison to his famous wife.

The pair are new parents to 7-month-old daughter Olive.

Reese Witherspoon:

With an Academy Award and numerous hit movies under her belt, it’s no surprise that Reese Witherspoon – mom of Ava, 13, Deacon, 9, and Tennessee, 7 months – has an estimated net worth of $80 million.

While she was once wed to fellow actor Ryan Phillippe, and recently dated fellow A-lister Jake Gyllenhaal, she is now married to talent agent Jim Toth, whom does not earn multi-million dollar paychecks like his famous wife.

Jessica Simpson:

Jessica Simpson is one of the most famous singer-turned-entrepreneurs of all time.

The expectant mama has a lucrative fashion line, a Weight Watchers deal and a hosting gig on TV’s Fashion Star, making her estimated net worth around $100 million.

Meanwhile, her fiancé Eric Johnson, a former NFL player, is not bringing home any known revenue at the moment. The couple expect their second child within weeks, and they are already parents to 1-year-old daughter Maxwell.

Kelly Ripa:

She’s a former soap star that turned into a successful talk show host, holding her own next to the king of daytime TV, Regis Philbin.

But Kelly Ripa - lucky in love after 17 years of marriage to her All My Children costar Mark Consuelos - is also incredibly wealthy, worth an estimated $75 million.

With Mark taking on the occasional hosting gigs, Kelly rakes in the dough for Mark and their three kids: Michael, nearly 16, Lola, nearly 12, and Joaquin, 10.

Natalie Portman:

Academy Award-winning actress Natalie Portman has been called one of Hollywood’s most “bankable” actresses.

Her husband, ballet choreographer Benjamin Millepied, recently landed the new role of Director of Dance at the Paris Opera Ballet. But Natalie – mom to 1 1/2-year-old Aleph – is still the main breadwinner, with an estimated net worth of $32 million.

Mariah Carey:

Nick Cannon reportedly receives $70 thousand per episode of America’s Got Talent. But that does not even compare to his wife, Mariah Carey, and her reported $18 million salary to join American Idol.

As one of the most successful female recording artists of all time, Mariah is worth an estimated $500 million, making her more than capable of providing a luxurious lifestyle for the couple’s 2-year-old twins Moroccan and Monroe.

Julia Roberts:

Pretty Woman star Julia Roberts was ranked the fifth highest-paid actress by Forbes in 2011 and regularly pulls in double-digit figures for her movies.

After meeting on the set of 2000′s The Mexican, Julia and her hubby, cameraman Danny Moder, have welcomed three children: 8-year-old twins Finn and Hazel and Henry, 6.

But although Danny also works in the film industry, he doesn’t even come close to his wife’s estimated net worth of $140 million.

People reports Jessica wore a bright blue Diane von Furstenberg dress and entered the party with 11-month-old Maxwell at her hip. The party was a Tom Sawyer-themed affair – decorated with vintage tables, tin pitchers, and a wooden boat.

“They’re best friends,” says Weiss. “Jessica trusted her mom to make the decisions!”

The food included pigs in a blanket, mini sliders and grilled cheese from a custom station. Weiss added that Jessica – who is expecting a boy – wanted Thousand Island dressing at the salad bar. “She’s craving it!” says Weiss.

A source told US Weekly,”Tina was so thrilled to be at the shower and seemed over the moon for Jessica. She was so bubbly and happy.”

On Thursday, we spotted the family-of-three out and about in Westwood.

Also recently, we saw a cute shot of the Fashion Star mentor and her BFF, former assistant CaCee Cobb, cradling their growing baby bumps.

In classic Jessica style, the blonde beauty recently revealed her baby’s gender in a TMI joke. “I just feel awful,” she said. “I’ve been vomiting, The crazy thing is I never knew a wiener could make me nauseous,” she quipped.

Instantly realizing what she admitted, Jess laughed and continued, “Well, I guess I just told the world that I’m having a boy!”

“I can’t believe I did that; that was not planned … I just did it so crude, too,” she later added. “That was awful. I’m talking about wieners.”

Expectant mama Jessica Simpson and fiancé Eric Johnson were photographed with their 11-month-old daughter Maxwell at grandma Tina’s house in Toluca Lake, Calif. on Easter Sunday (March 31). Dressed in casual duds, the trio took an afternoon stroll around the posh neighborhood.

Over the past few days, we’ve spotted the famous family out and about in Los Angeles.

In recent months, a gay cheating scandal hit the internet, and Joe and Tina Simpson are now undergoing divorce proceedings.

Tina is currently renting the Spanish-style home from actress Jennifer Love Hewitt for a cool $12,500 a month.

Build in 1926, the 3,216-square-foot house features an office with a separate entrance, a music room, a gym, and a family room that opens up to the patio overlooking a private pool, spa and a lakefront dock.

The master bedroom also has a view of the lake, and reportedly, Jennifer is allowing Tina to use her power boat and kayaks.

Actress Jessica Simpson stepped out in sweats as she headed to a workout on Thursday (March 28).

Yesterday the 32-year-old was spotted leaving a doctor’s office in Beverly Hills with Eric Johnson after taking 10-month-old baby Maxwell for a routine check-up.

Jessica wore a yellow and black striped Maxi dress and a cardigan.

Simpson recently let it slip that she is having a boy when she made an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live and said, “The crazy thing is I never knew a wiener could make me nauseous” and then added “…I guess I just told the world that I’m having a boy!”.

Eric Johnson enjoyed some daddy-daughter time today, running a few errands in Los Angeles, California with his daughter Maxwell in tow (February 21). The 10-month-old looked absolutely adorable in her leopard-print leggings and booties.

Mom Jessica Simpson, meanwhile, was all business, heading to a meeting in Westwood. The expectant mom showed off her chic maternity style in head-to-toe black.

Though baby #2 – reportedly a boy – isn’t due for a while yet, Eric and Jessica have apparently already settled on a name: “[She's] told people she’s going to name the baby Ace!” a source told US magazine this week.

While all the tabloids are busy charting Jessica Simpson‘s new baby bump, who cares about that crap? I’m much more interested in her recent growth spurt in other areas. Which is why I’ve formed the Jessica Simpson Pregnant Boob Watch. Volunteers welcome. I’d have to get out my measuring tape to be sure, but I think Jessica’s grown significantly since the last time we saw them, and if you ask me, they’re looking very healthy.

A source said, “It’s Jessica’s dream come true, she prayed she was having a boy. She found out this week after a check-up at the doctor, who asked her if she wanted to know the sex of the baby. Jessica immediately said yes and when the doctor told her it was a boy she screamed with joy.”

The insider added that she’s thrilled 9-month-old Maxwell will be getting a brother.

“She was so happy that Maxwell is getting a little brother because that’s something she always wanted when she was growing up.”

Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson celebrated the birth of their child back in May and are currently planning a wedding. Jessica is also well on her way to losing all of the weight she gained during her pregnancy, so things seem to be looking up for Jessica. However, a new report from Star magazine could flip Jessica’s new life upside down.

“He’s a two-timing cheat! He was still having sex with Keri after he started seeing Jessica. She needs to think twice before marrying him. He’s already cheated on her once — he’ll most likely do it again.” the source told the magazine.

Star magazine also claims that Eric Johnson isn’t very excited about his future wedding with Jessica Simpson. It may be that he doesn’t want to settle down quite yet, or maybe he just wants to sleep with his ex-wife without feeling guilty? Jessica Simpson first met Eric at a friend’s house; they met while Eric was still with Keri.

It is important to note that a close friend of Jessica Simpson has told The Huffington Post that the story is “ridiculous.“ The friend also claims that Eric is the most devoted fiancé and father.

Joe Simpson (better known as the father of Jessica Simpson) was arrested for DUI in Los Angeles on August 4. The 54-year-old was pulled over around 10 PM on Ventura Blvd in Sherman Oaks. Cops suspected Joe had been drinking, so they handcuffed him and sent him straight to jail. He ended up spending the entire night in jail and was released the next day. Since it’s Joe’s first offense, he will probably not be spending anymore time behind bars. However, he will probably be getting fined and he’ll have to explain this whole thing to Jessica…which just might be worse than jail.

Joe Simpson is basically like a slightly less annoying version of Michael Lohan (Lindsay Lohan’s Dad) –which means he cannot survive without his daughter’s success. We all know that Jessica Simpson will be the one paying his fine and she’ll probably have to pay for his impending stint in rehab. She doesn’t have money to be wasting on him! She is spending all her money on losing that baby weight. Jessica is probably spending $1,000 a week on organic smoothies and protein shakes. She has to be smart with money from now on; lord knows she won’t be getting cast as Daisy Duke anymore. Unless, of course, they can find someway to fit her fatness into the storyline.

We guess Jessica Simpson needs a little motivation to shed off all that baby weight because she has a new $4 million deal with Weight Watchers. “As soon as Jessica heals from the C-section, she is extremely determined to work out. She wants to show the world and is excited to do it.” a source said.

She has to be determined because she HAS to lose weight…it’s in the contract! The 5’3 star admitted that she ballooned up to 175 pounds, which is quite the spike in weight for someone as short as her. Sources familiar with Weight Watchers claim that Jessica will need to lose at least 50 pounds,

“She’ll have to meet the weight-loss goals for the deal to go through. She hasn’t chosen a trainer yet. In fact, she hasn’t even thought about it. But if she wants this, she’ll need to work out a good five times a week.” the source said.

Boo-hoo. Most people don’t get $4 million just for doing something they’re already supposed to be doing. If everyone received $4 million for losing 50 pounds…the obesity crisis would be gone.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Jessica Simpson has officially had her baby! It turns out her huge belly didn’t just explode like we all thought might happen. The baby girl weighed a healthy 9 pounds 13 ounces and measured in at 21.75 inches. That is a pretty good size baby; guess we know why her belly was so big! Well, that and all the Oreos she ate.

Jessica and her fiance Eric Johnson named the baby, ‘Maxwell Drew Johnson’ which sounds really proper and British, but at least they didn’t name her, ‘Sunshine’ or some other Hollywood like name. Jessica did release a short statement on her website saying,

“Eric and I are elated to announce the birth of our baby girl Maxwell Drew Johnson. We are so grateful for all the love, support and prayers we have received. This has been the greatest experience of our lives.”

You may have heard the rumors going around this past week claiming that Jessica Simpson secretly had her baby. However, it appears that those rumors were not true at all. Jessica took to Twitter and put an end to all the speculation, “To everyone who keeps congratulating me on the birth of my baby girl…I’m still pregnant!! Don’t believe what you read ladies and gents.”

So, there you have it! Jessica Simpson is definitely still pregnant…but wait. Didn’t she just say, “Don’t believe what you read ladies and gents.” how are we supposed to believe her tweet then? Maybe she really did already have her baby and she is just hiding it in a very clever way.

That is highly unlikely, though. If she isn’t smart enough to know the difference between chicken and tuna; I highly doubt she would be clever enough to trick the world.

Jessica Simpson stripped down for Elle magazine this week. In the picture you can see her covering up her huge breasts with her huge hands. You can view all the pictures down below; our favorite one is the picture of her fiancé kissing her belly. Those shots are so played out; it’s like the mirror picture of pregnancy.

Simpson confirms that they are expecting a girl and she also talks about how she hopes her daughter takes after her and not her dad. “I swear, I will croak if she asks me for a pair of Nikes instead of Christian Louboutins! Eric is so athletic – we’re gonna have this athletic girl. I won’t even be able to take her shopping, ‘cause all she’s gonna want is sports bras and Nikes.”

Yeah, that would just be terrible! How dare her daughter! Wanting to exercise and not spend a fortune on a pair of crappy shoes. I’d put her up for adoption, she sounds like a demon child!

It is amazing how celebrities always tend to get pregnant in clusters. Hmm… curious, is it not? The last cluster like this was in 2008-2009 when it seemed like every celebrity in Hollywood was preggers. And now is no different. Three of our most beautiful and talented starlett’s have gotten knocked up. And I am here to give you the skinny on the bellies! Jennifer Garner, mother of two and wife to used-to-be sexy dude Ben Affleck is Veeeery pregnant. But, on the subject of Ben… Have any of you noticed how unsexy he is lately? What is UP with that? Fatherhood has not been good to him or Brad Pitt, in my opinion. But, back on the subject of baby bumps, Jennifer was spotted in Santa Monica today getting some Mommy-time with some girlfriends. She was looking absolutely stunning, too. It’s crazy how a patterned scarf can uplift even the most blah of outfits, isn’t it? Had she not worn that scarf, I probably would have been here telling you how terrible she looked today. But — she did, and she does look beautiful. I’m not sure of her due date, other than it will be rather soon… Jessica Simpson was promoting a fashion show for Nicole Richie, looking absolutely fab, by the way. She was wearing a Roberto Cavalli dress that was clinging to that bump like a second skin. Unlike the rather slim — under the circumstances — Jennifer, Jessica has definitely plumped up a bit. But, that tends to happen with your first pregnancy. Jessica, even with the extra weight, looks absolutely stunning and will be popping sometime very soon, I’m sure. She has also announced that ‘It’s a Boy!!!’ Ah, and then we have music sensation and powerhouse, Beyonce, who is expecting fellow hip-hop front runner, Jay-Z’s baby. And, though there has been much controversy over this pregnancy of hers, she is still looking gorgeous. Also taking after Jessica, Ms. Bootylicious herself has packed on some baby LB’s for sure. But, I love me the curvy women, so I think she looks exceptional. As did many when she was spotted for the first time today since New Year’s. And, even though the rumor mill has been a-running that she has either had the baby girl already or isn’t even pregnant at all, two things are for sure: One — girl’s still got style! And two — she is still as sexy as ever! So, expect some news in the next few weeks, ladies and gents. Because some extremely beautiful future celebrities will be making their way into this world very soon!!!

We all know Jessica Simpson is no where close to her golden days when she was dancing around in a pair of daisy dukes…..ah those were the days. But, then she got pretty dang chubby and it wasn’t just that she gained a few pounds. She got really sloppy, too! It is fine for a woman to have a few extra pounds, just don’t get sloppy with it. Jessica Simpson got really sloppy and well now she is pregnant! I don’t mean just a little pregnant, she is REALLY pregnant. It looks like she has Mini-Me growing in her belly or something. I am sure she can’t fit into jeans anymore, so she is wearing some comfy looking sweatpants or tracksuit pants, basically pants that don’t need to be buttoned. And, of course she is wearing Ugg boots, she is the perfect candidate for Ugg boots, I bet she has pair of Crocs, too. Are those not the worst shoes, ever? They make my skin crawl just thinking about them. Anyway, you might be wondering why I am showing you these pictures and I can only think of two reasons. It’s Christmas and news is so very slow, and plus I know some of you weirdos have pregnant fetishes. I am not judging…okay yeah I am. Why can’t you just have a normal fetish? Like a foot fetish or something. A foot fetish is a perfectly accepted fetish.

After trolling all the magazines and asking for $500,000 just to tell us what we already knew, Jessica Simpson gave up and showed off her belly. So unless, that’s a prosthetic, she’s at least 5-6 months pregnant. “Anyone interested in buying these ultrasound scans? I taught the little bastard to do a back-flip and pee at the same time. $1,000,000?”

January Jones is not happy with her new Mad Men attire. That or Perrier is making her burpy.

Exhibit #168 that Jessica Simpson is pregnant: Need for urgent and frequent urination.

Carmen Electra’s right nipple is cold.

Alessandra Ambrosio is pumping her own gas??? America is on the verge of collapse.

Lady Gaga is calling her trichologist because her hair is falling out. That’s how I’m interpreting abstract art. Plus, her boyfriend is actually not an android with a quirky sense of style but Taylor Kinney from Vampire Diaries? I don’t get it.

We now understand David Arquette’s plight for younger poon.

Hilary Duff testing our oath to never make crotch jokes about pregnant women.

Hugh Jackman, Man Of Steal walking his little dog Peaches. Elton John wants this piece on his yacht, A.S.A.P.

Justin Theroux wants to make love with Justin Theroux, so Jennifer Aniston is filling in the blanks.