Sunday, May 2, 2010

Starting with the domestication of fire, and culminating in the post WWII suburbanization of America, the grill has long been the domain of men. A fact that I imagine unjustifiably upsets a large number of feminists. And I say unjustifiably because they should take solace in the fact that even a modestly trained primate can season and flip a piece of meat; coupled with the fact that despite claiming dominance of the grill so many centuries ago, weekend after weekend, men manage to murder perfectly good pieces of meat, proving yet again, we truly are the (mentally) weaker sex. So let's go over the few simple steps required to maintain your manhood, and the respect of your guests.

Hopefully, you have selected some grass-fed, organic beef from a butcher like Paisanos, but even if you make your purchasing decisions like a modern day troglodyte basking in the rays of the industrialized food system, it should still taste good, so.... Brush both sides of the steak

with a dab of olive oil and liberally apply salt and pepper. Toss on a hot grill and rotate after about 3-4 minutes and then flip after another 3-4 to create well defined x-cross grill marks. I would suggest this as a good time to prepare a salad or grill some veggies or other nonsense, but I have to start that at least a few minutes prior, because I have a very tiny attention span, and am quickly mesmerized by the fire jumping up to kiss the meat. I charred up some zucchini, tomatoes, portabella mushrooms, and onions, but maybe some thinly sliced cucumbers and tomatoes with feta in a vinegar based dressing....sounds perfect right?

Ok, so the steaks have been on the grill for about 8 minutes on each side.....here comes the important part...take them off, put them on a plate, and leave them the eff alone. I mean it, don't murder a perfectly good steak, wait 10....15 minutes, and then you can start thinking about serving your masterpiece....having trouble waiting? Grab a beer and a lawn chair, quality takes patience.