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Thoughts on flashing/public stuff

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So this has been a hot topic today, and I am in the mindset that I think while I'm sure it was fun and playful, it shouldn't be a common thing. The problematic part was she asked a dude if he'd touch her boobies, he said NO, but she still flashed him her boobies.

Roles reversed, if a guy had done it, he'd be in legal trouble and likely marked a sex offender. Girl does it... people giggle and make jokes about "why would the guy say no?"

I hate how the double standard is so obviously at play here. What are your thoughts?

So this has been a hot topic today, and I am in the mindset that I think while I'm sure it was fun and playful, it shouldn't be a common thing. The problematic part was she asked a dude if he'd touch her boobies, he said NO, but she still flashed him her boobies.

Roles reversed, if a guy had done it, he'd be in legal trouble and likely marked a sex offender. Girl does it... people giggle and make jokes about "why would the guy say no?"

I hate how the double standard is so obviously at play here. What are your thoughts?

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Yup, it's fucked up. When he told her no, she should've kept her damn tits in her shirt. Same thing with these news stories about female school teachers having sex with their minor students. I see the Facebook comments on these articles. It's always a bunch of guys acting like it's this awesome thing (IF the teacher shown in the photo is "hot"), and making comments like "Man, I didn't have teachers like that when I was in school!" Yet if that was their 14 or 15-year old daughter with a male teacher, those same guys would probably be ready to march over there, and blow his head off...or beat the shit outta him.

I know the article isn't about two people having sex, but still. My point was that I definitely notice the double standard.

"You'll get no sympathy from me! You want sympathy...look in the dictionary between SHIT and SYPHILIS! That's where you'll find my sympathy!" - Major Payne

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Honestly I don’t trust the way she markets herself; it just seems to be an angle rather than a true priority. Especially considering some twitter drama a bit back. I wouldn’t trust her to give a real shit about consent or changing anything about the status quo.

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Ugh that’s so fucked up. I agree with the above posters. I also think it’s so gross to use other people unwittingly for your business. Totally inappropriate and not something anyone who cares about consent/sex positivity/etc should support.

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If a dude walked up to her and asked “hey want to touch my dick” and she said no. But then he proceeded whip his cock out waving it around like it’s her honor to see it... she’d probably be grossed out. Thank his behavior is unacceptable, and illegal. It should work for everyone. Just because she’s a female who is the typical kind of attractive gives her no right to violate others.

As for the image of sex worker this is an example of everything I wish people didn’t think. I don’t know about her or her stance on anything, first time I’ve seen her is this clip. But I’d like to hope not all her actions are so selfish and foolish.

As for the dude, I feel bad if he’s getting shit from other “men”. Because he was by legal definition sexually assaulted (at least here In Cali). I had a friend in my first year of college who had to register as a sexy offender because he mooned someone. She should be on the same list and the dude should be treated with respect for not playing into her game.

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Where does the "but boobs aren't a sexual organ!?" argument come into play when we compare titty flashing to dick flashing?

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Sure boobies are made for feeding children, but they are also a common sexual turn on for men and women. You may not get turned on feeding a child (let’s hope not) but you might get turned on from having someone suck on your nipples.

In this context it looks like they are at a club or concert of some kind. Obviously her tits aren’t being whipped out to feed any starving children near by lol. Therefore the intention was meant to be sexual and he could easily say he was sexually assaulted by the flash.

If she was quietly breastfeeding her baby at say a museum and flashed him in the process he has no right to complain. It’s like the word bitch... contexts matters

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I have mixed feelings. On one hand, I think it's absolutely silly that I go to the club and seen a dozen dudes dancing without a shirt on, whether anyone likes it or not, and it's no harm, no foul. No one thinks twice. I really wish women had the freedom to do the same, because I love being nude and I don't see anything inherently sexual about human chests, female or male. But that's not the world we live in.

HOWEVER, the larger part of me feels like this video and the flashes were done in an intentionally sexual manner. It was done in order to titillate and flirt and excite, which takes something natural and sexualizes it. Which is where the consent part is important, and why one should always honor another person's consent.

To go out of your way to ask someone's permission, and when they ask you not to, to purposefully violate their consent anyways... That's pretty shady. I mean, even sexuality aside. This goes for any situation. If I asked someone if I could hug them, and they said no, it would be horrible of me to hug them anyways. It is invalidating their consent, and putting my desires above theirs. Adding in public nudity done in a titillating manner - and I feel it does cross the line to sexual harassment.

Even if you believe that the human body is natural, and nudity isn't sexualized... It's important to see things from the views of others and respect their personal boundaries. Flashing people against their will is NOOOOOOT the way to go about changing societal views. Violating consent & sexual harassment is not the way to change the world. Even though I personally see nudity as natural, I still would be super offended if a man flashed his genitals at me in public, especially after I already asked him not to. It isn't the nudity itself that is offensive in my eyes - it's the invalidation of my consent, my emotional comfort. It feels like a twisted sexual power game. It's his desire or his thrill becoming more important than my comfort and personal boundaries. And this situation feels the same.

There are spaces where being topless in public is allowed, and where people have the choice to view it or not, to stay or go away, and usually, those spaces don't involve sexuality (i.e., nude beaches, topless bike events, slut walk protests). The places where nudity is sexualized are usually privatized, i.e., strip clubs. People go there INTENDING to see sexualized nudity. To go to a space where public nudity is (I'm assuming) not allowed, and draw someone into a sexualized situation AGAINST their specifically stated consent... I can't think of a single situation where that is okay. It's not. It's assault.

Nude laws and spaces aside, it boils down to this. It doesn't seem right to go into someone else's space, ask their consent to involve them in a sexual situation, and violate said consent when it is refused. Anyone should have the right to refuse sexual situations. Especially this poor dude. He just went to the club to have fun, to dance a little, to drink a little. He had his consent violated, and became the butt of jokes on the internet.

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The problem with flashing your tits to someone without their consent right now is that in our current social structure that is an inherently sexual act. It's not like she was breast feeding a child or casually walking down the street. The very nature of flashing your tits at someone is sexual.

If the law changes to allow your breasts out in public, cool, but that's not the case right now, and the way she went about this was a sexual manner.

I'd feel the same way about penises. If the law changed so anyone can walk around naked, then casually walking around naked is one thing. But shoving your dick at me and trying to get me to touch it after I tell you no is another thing.

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The intent was to be sexual and to do so without consent. She “flashed” him, she wasn’t just caught swimming topless at the river. It’s all about intent and the intent was to force her sexuality on someone. Not cool. And to take a video of him and post it on her business porn social media even more uncool.

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Ugh, her justification in subsequent tweets is fucking disgusting. Her polls don’t provide context of the situation that she created and the idea that the problem here is the stigma associated with titties, rather than her inability to recognize boundaries is ridiculous.

There is a difference between tits-out for comfort or utility or even just for funsies and flashing someone who has explicitly opted out of your sexual propositions.

Kind of like others have stated, mixed on it. While I don't think there should be a difference between men and women being topless. There is a meaning of intent, and could be classified as sexual assault same as if a guy whipped his dick out in the same manner.

V.I.P. AmberLander

From a UK point of view ... from experience when I was working in the criminal justice system over here , there is very old legislation ( the Vagrancy Act 1824... Lol ) ,covering men flashing ... the main part being ...”exposing their person (!!)”.... ( a person would you believe is the penis ).... but no such legislation has ever existed for women exposing their tits !!
The only legislation is ...”outraging public decency” but would that ever hold up these days ?

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I am from one of those cities where its legal for women to be topless. It's legal for women to be topless because you can't arrest a woman for something you wouldn't/couldn't arrest a man for. Using it for a sexual intent is a perversion.

Being found topless, sunbathing in the corner of a park, breasting feeding child---and other nonsexual reasons your breast might be exposed are much different.

Regardless of legal/illegal....it's not just moral or ethical to expose yourself with sexual intent without consent.
In this particular video, the man in question explicitly said he does not consent. There are 1000's of dudes who would consent....just take a look at that thread. Why not choose to expose yourself to someone who consented?

But also--it's weird to randomly ask someone to grab any body part, even ones that are rarely considered sexual.
Guy rolls up to you in a club and asks you to grab his leg...weird, its weird.

I'd like to think this simply a bad representation of Ginger, because I have seen her attempt to do some advocate work. I saw that Amber invited her to join in on this convo.

THis whole thread is an example of how Cam Models create witch hunts. None of you actually care about the truth as you are ignoring it and running away with what you “think” happened and then just bashing Ginger.
I see this happen all the time in our community. People jumping in the bandwagon to bash a high profile model at ANY given opportunity based upon inaccurate information.
I see people in here who obviously already had issues with Ginger and just using this as another opportunity to bash her more.

Were any of you there??
Amber Cutie, I enjoy your site, but you’ve stooped to a new low here. You are perpetuating a false claim that Ginger inconsentingly flashed someone, which she has explauned she did not.

If you want to discuss this topic, that is one thing. To use it as an opportunity to just bash a Model who has been known to be controversial is making YOU a part of the problem in this Sex community.
Shame.

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THis whole thread is an example of how Cam Models create witch hunts. None of you actually care about the truth as you are ignoring it and running away with what you “think” happened and then just bashing Ginger.
I see this happen all the time in our community. People jumping in the bandwagon to bash a high profile model at ANY given opportunity based upon inaccurate information.
I see people in here who obviously already had issues with Ginger and just using this as another opportunity to bash her more.

Were any of you there??
Amber Cutie, I enjoy your site, but you’ve stooped to a new low here. You are perpetuating a false claim that Ginger inconsentingly flashed someone, which she has explauned she did not.

If you want to discuss this topic, that is one thing. To use it as an opportunity to just bash a Model who has been known to be controversial is making YOU a part of the problem in this Sex community.
Shame.

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It’s not bashing or ~stopping to a new low~ to discuss something that was intentionally and very deliberately shared. The video was posted specifically to get a reaction and to get attention (just like literally everything on social media). You don’t get to control how people react to the things you share. It’s a hot topic in the cam community, why should it not be discussed?

Also she says “still flashed” so not sure how she “CLEARLY stated she DID NOT flash him”. If she clarified later, cool, but that wasn’t clear from the beginning. And it’s still gross to post some random dudes video under the presumption that he doesn’t want to be part of her shenanigans.

I think it’s evident Amber made the thread to discuss the topic, not specifically to bash Ginger, but I also don’t think people have been overly harsh.

THis whole thread is an example of how Cam Models create witch hunts. None of you actually care about the truth as you are ignoring it and running away with what you “think” happened and then just bashing Ginger.
I see this happen all the time in our community. People jumping in the bandwagon to bash a high profile model at ANY given opportunity based upon inaccurate information.
I see people in here who obviously already had issues with Ginger and just using this as another opportunity to bash her more.

Were any of you there??
Amber Cutie, I enjoy your site, but you’ve stooped to a new low here. You are perpetuating a false claim that Ginger inconsentingly flashed someone, which she has explauned she did not.

If you want to discuss this topic, that is one thing. To use it as an opportunity to just bash a Model who has been known to be controversial is making YOU a part of the problem in this Sex community.
Shame.

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Based on her very first tweet "First guy I asked to grab my tits, said no. Still flashed" implies that she flashed him. While she later claims that she walked away to do the flash, did she? Were you there to confirm that? No. So, maybe she did. Maybe she didn't. We're all basing opinions, and discussing this, all off the same information.

Does it matter if it's a guy, or a girl, to grab a body part? Shouldn't, as the intent is the same.

As to bashing, I haven't read any posts here about bashing Ginger. Only raising the point that the actions she took are a double standard when it seems acceptable from a woman. Yet unacceptable from a man.

I think this is the crucial difference. I looked through her twitter and the vid and apologies if I missed it or she took it down but I can't see where she actually shows the guy that said no. She just mentioned a guy says no to her and then flashes her tits after appearing to turn away from the direction of that guy.

I still don't think this is OK but it's a big difference between what she did and flashing them in the face of the guy who has already said no which is what people in this thread are accusing her of.

Edit. Never mind re-read the actual words of her first tweet and she makes it sound like she totally did still just flash him. If she did flash the guy who had specifically told her no then yeah there's no defending that.

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THis whole thread is an example of how Cam Models create witch hunts. None of you actually care about the truth as you are ignoring it and running away with what you “think” happened and then just bashing Ginger.
I see this happen all the time in our community. People jumping in the bandwagon to bash a high profile model at ANY given opportunity based upon inaccurate information.
I see people in here who obviously already had issues with Ginger and just using this as another opportunity to bash her more.

Were any of you there??
Amber Cutie, I enjoy your site, but you’ve stooped to a new low here. You are perpetuating a false claim that Ginger inconsentingly flashed someone, which she has explauned she did not.

If you want to discuss this topic, that is one thing. To use it as an opportunity to just bash a Model who has been known to be controversial is making YOU a part of the problem in this Sex community.
Shame.

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Witch hunts are not an issue uniquely found in our community. It's something that happens in most communities. I understand that you are part of this community so its the community that you see it happen in, but its something that happens regularly everywhere. It also doesn't only happen to high profile models.

You see people who obviously already had issues with Ginger? Who are they, and why do you say its obvious? I did not catch this.

I am unclear how Amber is perpetuating a false claim by starting a thread on what is already a hot topic in the community--and even inviting Ginger to join in on the discussion. (many of the posts in this thread don't even mention her, and discuss the topic itself)
I am not sure what you mean by "stooped to a new low"-- cuz that would imply she has stooped to a low previously. What/when was that? I also don't see much bashing towards her..but her actions.

I did not see where she explained further that she "did not flash him" -- I also admittedly did not read all 400+ responses in that thread....

That being said I did read her the original tweet where she said: "First guy I asked to grab my tits at the bar said no Still flashed." Which implies that not only did she flash (her word) but she did it in spite of him said no -- and that is what most people are responding to.

No one was accusing her of anything..they/we were taking her for her original word...if that has changed --- then cool. There is, however, no doubt in my mind that she chose to phrase her words in the original tweet like that on purpose..regardless of what actually went down.

Here's some of her early tweets after the initial one. So, while she does eventually say she left him alone, the very first tweet still very much implies that she flashed him without his consent. But, again, why is it okay for a woman to ask someone to grab her tits when it's unacceptable for a guy to ask someone to grab him? He'd go to jail, most likely convicted of sexual misconduct and have to register as a sex offender. Again, double standards. Which is what this thread is discussing.

I think most of them are just surprised someone would say no to me or something along those lines. I also understand why it probably sounded too good to be true haha

11:35 AM - 9 Nov 2018

But i did ask for consent. He said no and I walked away to flash my tits. Idk what you think happened lol

1:12 AM - 10 Nov 2018

Haha no, I’m trying to not hook up with random people anymore. The experience of having sex with me is too special to give to some random drunk person haha they are lucky they got to grab my tits and dance with me

12:23 AM - 9 Nov 2018

I did leave him alone lmao it was just a story about what happened...haha

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