ESC Brazil Prepares for the Robot Apocalypse

ESC Brazil 2014 is the place to "see and be seen" for any hardware designer and software developer of embedded systems based in South America.

I am aquiver with excitement and anticipation, because ESC Brazil is coming ever closer. In fact, it's only two weeks away as I pen these words.

ESC Brazil is to be held August 26 and August 27 in the Transamerica Expo Center in São Paulo, and yours truly will be speaking on both days.

I had a slightly worrying time a few minutes ago while rooting around the Conference Agenda because I couldn't find my presentations anywhere. I'm happy to report that, eventually, I did find myself (it was a very "Zen Experience") on the Sponsored Sessions page.

I did wonder about this for a while, but then I realized that these sessions are FREE and open to anyone attending the exhibition. Also, since UBM/EETimes is paying for my time and expenses, I suppose I am being sponsored in a way.

Introducing FPGAs
On Tuesday. August 26, my presentation will be about FPGAs. When the developers of embedded systems first think about the architecture of their creation, the vast majority only consider a traditional microcontroller-based implementation. This is unfortunate, because FPGAs can offer significant advantages for a wide variety of application scenarios.

I know a humongous number of embedded designers who have only ever worked with microcontrollers. When we are chatting and I ask them about FPGAs, they have almost always heard of these devices and they are aware that FPGAs can be configured to perform whatever function is required, but that's about the extent of their knowledge. Similarly, they may have heard of languages like Verilog and VHDL, and they know these are the languages hardware design engineers use to capture their design intent, but they have no idea as to how this happens and the types of tools that are employed.

This is the perfect audience for my presentation -- embedded designers who understand microcontrollers and regular programming languages like C/C++ and regular software tools like IDEs and compilers and debuggers, but who have no real understanding as to how their systems can be enhanced by the use of FPGAs. I cannot wait to share the good news and kindle everyone's enthusiasm to discover more.

The robot apocalypse and trends in embedded systems
On Wednesday 27, my presentation will be about... well, all sorts of things, really. Where are embedded systems heading? Where will we be in 10, 20, 50, and 100 years' time? What are the chances of us making it through to the end of ESC Brazil 2014 without a robot uprising taking place?

A lot of people tend to scoff at the idea of a robot apocalypse. "We will never be able to create an artificial intelligence that is truly self-aware," they say complacently to themselves. Well, that's probably because they haven't heard about... but no, I'm not going to give all my secrets away here, you'll just have to attend my presentation.

Now, it's a well-known fact that an Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie (AFDB) is a type of headwear that can shield one's brain from most electromagnetic and psychotronic attacks, including brain-scanning, mind-reading, and even the subtlest of mind-control carrier signals. What is perhaps less-well-known is the fact that even superior artificial intelligences can be confused by a human sporting an AFDB.

By some strange quirk of fate, I happen to be one of the world's foremost experts in this technology. For example, consider the following photograph that was taken during one of my presentations at the EE Live! Conference an Exhibition earlier this year:

It's obvious that these world-leading engineers would not be wearing homemade AFDBs they created during my presentation unless they had absolute faith in my every word. Trust me. Have I ever lied to you before (that you're aware of)?

But what of the embedded designers in Brazil? Are they to be left fighting off the robot hordes on their own with no one to stand by their side? "No!" I cry, "This will not be!" Fear not, because I have the situation in hand. Attendees to my presentation are, of course, free to bring their personal AFDBs with them. In the unlikely event they forget, however, I will have numerous rolls of aluminum foil on hand (do I look like the sort of man who would go anywhere without a roll of duct tape, a roll of aluminum foil, and a traveling moustache?).

What I'm thinking is that we'll have a competition to make the most novel, unique, and generally interesting AFDB -- the sort of thing we'd all be proud to wear to the bar where you'll find me almost immediately after my presentation has concluded (LOL). And, just to make things interesting, the creator of the winning entry will receive a $100 Credit/Gift card.

So, are you planning on attending ESC Brazil 2014? If not, why not? This is the place to "see and be seen" for any hardware designer and software developer of embedded systems based in South America.

After extensive exhaustive research (Wikipedia), I have determined that only the coconuts song is rooted in the English musical scene. The bananas song is definitely American in origin, Tin Pan Alley. Well, they SHOULD have been performed together!

And here I thought I was probably the only one on EET who remembers BOTH of those songs fondly, as I learned them as a young child. I still remember them now as an extremely old child.... I am reminded of the "bananas" one (along with the original Chiquita jingle) every day: the VP/Engineering drops off a large bunch just about every morning (for the "code monkeys" that surround my cubicle. I presume) on top of the wall of my cube. That takes care of the Chiquita one; on the days he is out of the office, it's "Yes, we have no bananas...."

I'm not surprised about you folks remembering the "no bananas" one. Since you as a group are predominately Brits or at least ex-pats from other parts of the Commonwealth, and the songs are as I recall from an English musical, the connection is patent.

so how do we know your trip to Brazil is not faked, like the moon landings?? :-)

LOL

@ Max

If only I had a coconut for every time I've heard that one

Now you have two coconuts. Soon you'll have a coconut grove or at the very least a side-show at a local fair. You could sing "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts" and accompany it with the theremin and ukelele.