Sacrifice Your Soul for a SD Chargers' Super Bowl!

Being of sound body and mind, by electronically attaching my signature to this petition I do hereby approve and affirm the transfer of my soul, to be defined for the purposes of this agreement as the immaterial essence, animating principle, or actuating cause of an individual life, in my possession to the Mojo Machine (MM) in exchange for consideration consisting of a guaranteed San Diego Chargers Super Bowl Victory (SDCSBV) in the 2011-2012 NFL season. I hereby relinquish unto the MM all rights and privileges to the soul with which I was born, for all time and eternity. I acknowledge that the MM shall harness the energy of my soul to enhance the mojo required to secure a SDCSBV.
In attaching my signature to this petition I do not automatically acknowledge the existence of the human soul as defined above, nor does it attest to or preclude the signing party's observance as principium any deity, belief system, church, religion, sect, spirituality, or contemporary or ancient mythology. It does, however, state that should such an emanation exist it is no longer my property.
I swear that, prior to this transference, I had full and unrestricted rights to my soul and that no prior claim, easement, restriction, or covenant had been placed upon it. I fully understand the consequences of this act and I proceed willingly and cognizant of the irrevocable nature of this transference.
By sacrificing my soul to the MM I hereby acknowledge my membership in the Monkhood of the Mojo Machine (MMM). As a member of the MMM, I am a giver - sacrificing my soul in exchange for a SDCSBV for all Chargers' players and fans, including myself and without limitation so-called "bandwagoners."
I'm a giver.
Give 'til it hurts.
Go Chargers!

Sponsor

This petition and contract to transfer a human soul is sponsored by the Monkhood of the Mojo Machine (MMM) in cooperation with the Bag Head Cult (BHC) and its parent entity - the Chargers Band Wagon (CBW).