Cover Model

Getting Ready For A Night Out With Natalia LaLonde

Playboy / Atisha Paulson

She doesn’t know what to wear. She says she can’t make up her mind. She keeps changing her outfits. Have you been there? Don’t get frustrated. It’s all about perspective. And this week’s cover model Natalia LaLonde is here to remind you indecision can be sexy. It’s all in how you look at it.

It’s easy to get frustrated around the holidays. Lots of tension and potential for drama. So let Natalia remind you to seek the fun and sexiness in each moment. Natalia got together with photographer Atisha Paulson and found the alluring in-between moments of a woman getting ready to go out for the night.

Be sure to check Natalia’s photoshoot if your day could use a hit of sexy before you slip into the evening. Enjoy!

Sex and Dating

Why Are So Many Men Having Unwanted Sex?

Have you ever had sex when you weren’t in the mood? Maybe you did it because your partner was super horny and they typically want more sex than you do, or maybe you did it because you didn’t want your partner to feel unattractive or rejected, or worst of all, maybe you had sex when you didn’t want to in order to prove you’re a man. If you’ve done any of those things, you’re not alone. Let Jessie Ford, author of a new study focused on why men have sex with women when they did want to, explain why.

Describing her findings, Ford said, “What allows a man to save face or make sense is substantially informed by gender. Moreover, men conduct their sex lives in the shadow of presumed gendered reputational consequences. They fear ridicule if stories are told portraying them as the kind of man who declines sex with an attractive woman.”

A better measure of a man is that he does what feels right, for him, even if that means passing on a super horny hookup. Be sure to check this article for more. It overturns many of our deepest-held societal expectations of gender, and it points out how times are changing.

Kink Report

The tagline is a bit much to picture. But as you can see, these things are all the way real. This week, Playboy spoke with artistHutchtastic, a political activist who makes charming, neon Trump sex toys. Although they were originally intended to be sculptures, the Trump dildos are safe for sex play. The real question is who on Earth would want to willingly insert Trump into their holiest of holes? Even if it’s just a phallic version of his head. But that’s kinda the whole point. It’s sex as a form of protest.

Here’s how Hutchtastic puts it: “First of all, I am literally calling him a giant dickhead. Furthermore, even as a symbol rather than a functional object, I think a dildo speaks to women’s sexual autonomy.”

Fair point. But the question remains—if a woman uses the president’s head to get off, are the Trump dildos feminist? Yes? No? We’ll let you decide.

Now, if you are in the market for feminist sex toys, we have good news. There’s a new wave of pleasure machines being designed by women. They raise an interesting question: Would women build better sex toys? To answer that, meet Janet Lieberman and her business partner Alexandra Fine. Together, they launched Dame Products. Lieberman is an MIT-educated mechanical engineer and she brought her genius to bear on how to provide more pleasure. They just released their first toy called Eva, it’s a hand-free clitoral stimulator for partners. And their sex toy is decidedly feminist.

As Lieberman says, “In the end, it’s the engineer presence more than the female engineer presence that makes the difference.” What a very feminist approach to sex toys.

Sexual Horror Story

Meet the Men Who Get Sick Every Time They Orgasm

Imagine if you were allergic to your own semen. Not allergic like when you sneeze, allergic as in every time you climax, you get sick, and it lasts for up to a week. Brutal, right? That’s the reality for men who suffer from POIS, or post-orgasmic illness syndrome. It was first identified 15 years ago. Today, there are roughly 50 documented cases. As you might imagine, it often plays havoc on relationships since men with POIS typically shy from sex, or release, to avoid getting sick. Look, if you had a bad week, here’s a bright spot: at least you’re not allergic to sex.

Ready for another strange sexual ailment? This is the curious case of Stephen Schroeder. He went to the doctor complaining of a vicious case of “jock itch” that had lasted several months. That should be a warning sign. Like, bruh, why are you waiting to go to a doctor when your balls have been itchy for several months? As it turns out, his “itchy balls” weren’t a skin condition like regular old contact dermatitis. Also it wasn’t some kind of sex rash. Nope. It was cancer. It’s called extramammary Paget’s disease. The tricky part is that it looks like eczema or a dry rash. So, guys, if you’re balls stay itchy, like more than a few days, you definitely want to get that checked out.

Future Sex

Here Come the Digisexuals

Prepare for the rise of digisexuals. What are digisexuals? Good question. It’s a new term for people who happily, willingly and eagerly fuck sexbots. The term was coined in this recently published paper that defined digisexuls as “people whose primary sexual identity comes through the use of technology.” The study’s authors believe this will soon be a common new sexual identity, and regardless of how we may feel about it, “Clinicians must be prepared for the challenges and benefits associated with the adoption of such sexual technologies.”

One also assumes this means we’ll soon be talking about discrimination against digisexuals based on their life choices and sexual preferences. The future is gonna be so wild. Just imagine the dating profiles: “I’m a nonconsensual monogamist, but my primary partner is a digisexual, so right now, I’m looking for a side piece who’s 420-friendly, preferably vegan.”

This Week In WTF?!

“If You Cops Don’t Back Off I’m Gonna Hit You With This Dildo!”

Each week we like to take a digital trek around the globe to check in with all the ways people like to get frisky, sometimes their stories end with sexual heroics, other times they end in pain or shame, or both; and other times they end up behind bars. Without fail, we find a few creative kinksters, a few horny criminals that just make you wonder, “WTF?! Who does that?!” This week, it’s all about life’s little surprises.

Let’s start with a fun one. Are you racking your mind trying to come up with the perfect gift for that hard-to-shop-for family member, housemate, co-worker, frat brother or neighbor? What about a calendar? There’s this charming Erotic Carp calendar published each year by Hendrik Pöhler. He calls it the Carponizer Erotic Carp Fishing Calendar. It features beautiful barely-dressed women posing with open-mouthed carp. It’s become something of a cult favorite online. And this week, Kate Drieswrote about her disappointment that, once again, she will not be featured in the erotic carp calendar. Dare to dream, Kate!

Oh, Florida, we’re so glad to see you back in the headlines. Because everyone knows the best headlines start with two little words: Florida Man. And this headlines is a doozy. It tells you what you need to know, yet, it raises so many questions.

Cops responded to a call that a man was trespassing. When the cops arrived he was still asleep on the victim’s property. Once officers roused Donald Hornback, 71, he got a little surly. After he was told to leave the victim’s property Hornback grabbed a giant dildo from his belongings and attempted to use the rubber penis to assert his right to stay. Although he was threatening the cops with a weapon, since dildos are non-lethal, the cops did not feel the need to shoot the suspect.

Parents want to protect their kids. That often means rather than sit down and have a direct and honest conversation, they attempt to use fear and shame to frighten them away from what the parents see as risks to their safety. This never works out as well as honest communication. Case and point: this dad.

He texted his daughter a picture of a sex toy he found in her room. His text read, “Why are you making these purchases. That is disgusting! You shouldn’t waste your money! If you have these kinds of needs I suggest you don’t leave this shit laying around.”

His teenage daughter asked her dad what he thought she was buying. He sent her a picture of her portable USB phone charger. In all caps, her response explained what it actually was, and asked him why he was digging through her stuff.

Her dad texted back: “Don’t tell your mom…sorry. I needed chapstick.”

Now this unfortunate teen girl knows two things: one, her dad snoops through her stuff, and two, her mother definitely isn’t getting her mind blown with wild sex.

Um, what sex game requires a dude to put his dick between the blades of garden shears? According to the reports, the victim was blindfolded as part of a sex game. Or according to the defendant’s lawyers, he attacked her in her apartment and she defended herself by chopping off his dick. It’s a real case of he said, she said. The police in Argentina are understandably horrified and confused by the crime. Regardless of whether he or she is telling the truth, if anyone ever asks you to play a sex game with garden shears…don’t.

Last up, we have a real head-scratcher. Apparently, according to the New York Times, a priest over in England posted a blog on Thursday, asking that the parishioners take a moment to “pray in the privacy of their hearts (or in public if they dare) for the Lord to bless Prince George with a love, when he grows up, of a fine young gentleman.” In case you missed it, the priest was asking people to pray that the prince is gay. But this wasn’t a troll move. He legitimately hopes the prince is gay so that same-sex marriage gets legalized in the United Kingdom. Or as he put it, “A royal wedding might sort things out remarkably easily, though we might have to wait 25 years for that to happen.”

Okay, we definitely want to see same-sex marriage become legal in the U.K., but praying about the sexuality of a child is a really creepy way to pass laws. Instead, just ask God to legalize it.

Okay, sports fans, you know what time it is. That’s right. Time to get your mind primed for the sexiness of the weekend. And who better to stimulate your imagination than Simone Holtznagel. In her casually seductive photoshoot, she brings the sexy like the sun brings shine. Enjoy!