Mom is finally selling houses! Problem is she isn’t licensed. No big whoop for her, the test will be a breeze! Except she freaks when she meets Kim, a mega realtor who’s sold 358 houses and is getting recertified. She walks out of the test, assuaging her failure with a Chipwitch. Mmmm…now that’s something I can get behind: Chipwitch and a mostly Mom-centric episode.

WATCH: If You Can Get Through This Segment Full Of Drunk Women, You’ll Be One Up On Giada De Laurentiis

…Because Giada de Laurentiis left her brains splattered across The Today Show kitchen floor today. She stopped by this morning to demo some nice menu options for a “Ladies’ Night” gathering, with some nice healthy farro, and some nice indulgent eggplant parm bites, and some nice classy white pizza.

Unfortunately, she was competing with a gaggle of women (purportedly the “ladies’ night guests” in this god-awful scenario), none of whom took any issue with pouring herself a soup bowl of red wine at nine o’clock in the morning on national TV, and then demanding of Giada what “pharaoh” and/or “Farrah” was.

Very little demoing took place, confirming once and for all that ladies’ nights are the worst unless you’re the drunkest one there, which Giada, sadly, was not.