Friday, January 3, 2014

A time for everything and every thing in its time

by
Amanda Arista

I was working at a coffee
shop recently with a fellow writer. A young man, who was trying to flirt with
my fellow writer, asked what we were working on that morning and the
conversation lead to us being romance writers. And he said something, between
the overt attempts to get my friend to pay attention to him, like wouldn’t
it be nice if romances happen like that in the real world. And I, being
the curious one, asked why can't they? What is stopping us from making the grand gesture
that we love to read about in books?

He, of course, looked at me
like I was crazy and hid back behind his laptop. This guy wasn’t ready to make
the gesture and didn’t ask my fellow writer for her number.

But why not? Because he was
scared of rejection? Because he was way too busy listening to his Pandora rock
mix? Nope. He probably just wasn’t ready to be a hero yet.

Last month in her blog post,
Pamela Palmer got me thinking about heroes when she said that “the true mark of
character is revealed in how a person lives their
life every single day.” She also pointed out that every-day people are
presented a choice, and its that choice that creates a hero. In a
romance novel, our heroes and heroines usually have to overcome some internal
or external fear in order to be even considered heroic when they make their
choice. Doing something (making that choice) in the face of fear is courage and
courage makes a hero.

But there is also a notion
of timing. I like the cookie dough theory from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. People are ready to make the big choices
when they are ready, not a moment before and not a moment after. Think: Would
Mr. Darcy have been able to brood his way into Elizabeth Bennett’s heart if he
was still in university? Nope. (Bet he was still pretty cute though)

So to be a hero, you need to
be the right person to make the right choice at the right time.

I like to think the young
man in the coffee shop was still a little cookie dough and not quite ready to
take on the mantle of hero. I believe romantic heroes are out there in the real world just waiting for their moment
to ask the right girl in the right coffee shop for her number at the right time.

My New Year's Resolution: Be more Heroic. Get over my fears and make the choices, the ones that really matter, to me and to other people. If nothing else, I need to set an example for the new Little Bean in my life.