CURRENT, ONE PARTY NOT AN RATMMER

Jolene "Nummy Muffin Coocol Jolene" Rose
and the non-ratmmer known as Scott
Mike Czaplinski
and his wife, the non-ratmmer known as Monica
Jennifer Lynn "EvilJen" Corley (nee Hill)
and whoever the heck Mr. Corley is
Bob "Bice" Eichler
and his wife, the non-ratmmer known as Michele Matthews
Eric "Nemo" Granger
and his wife, the non-ratmmer known as Jaime (no relation to Jamie Plummer)
Bill Livingston
and his wife, the non-ratmmer-but-sorta-MST3K-liker Paula
Carl "Barcode" Burke
and his wife, the non-ratmmer-but-MST3K-liker Kathi Johnson
John "Darkhop" Hopkins
and his fiancee, the non-ratmmer known as Carol Kehrer
Bryan "RATTM's [sic] Official Biggest Wuss" Lambert
and the non-ratmmer known as Cathy Fylling
Greg "Torcha" Gershowitz
and whoever his (non-ratmmer) wife is
Camille P. "Cambot" Stein
and whoever her (non-ratmmer) husband is
Tracy Deuel
and her husband, the non-ratmmer known as Pete
Judith Jacobs
and her husband Stan, the Breadbaking Man
Susan Essman
and her esteemed spouse
Robert Krajewski
and his wife, who gave birth in 1998
Lori Holuta
and her husband, Caribou Ken
Joe "Slappy Kincaid" C
and Louisa, who is an AOL MSTie
Tom "TomR" Restivo
and his Sweetie Darling, the non-ratmmer known as Maggie
Chris "BKITU" Gleason
and The Lovely Miss J

Electronic sympathy cards for recently broken-up RATMMers:

<INSERT RATMMer HERE>

...and any other RATMMers who've fallen out of love in the recent past.