So here's the first draft for the final episode of the first series, Purge Environs! Hope you like it! Obviously it's still a work in progress, but I'm hoping, once it's finished, to make a few changes to it as soon as the other episodes are done. I've also made a few additional edits to your scripts in order to give a bit of a build-up to the revelation, hope you don't mind. XD this is so rough I've stuck placeholders in for most of it!

Purge Environs – Starbuggers Episode 8

Pre-titles scene

Maloney, Cywren, Juliet and Rimmer are seen running towards the shuttle.

Maloney: This is Captain Maloney of the USS Who’s Your Mama calling Starbug, is there anybody out there?

After a few moments of silence, the radio fizzes on and Mari’s voice is heard.

Mari: It’s me you idiot, why do you always have to introduce yourself in full?

Maloney: Look never mind that, we need a pickup and we need to like, get out of here pronto.

Mari: You would not believe the day I’ve had today, there’s just been nothing but Zombies and a-

Maloney: THE EMPIRE IS ONTO US!

Mari: …Oh. I see. We’ll pick you right up.

Cywren: There’s a Rebel base not too far away from here, I can give you the location. Bear 23.18 by 25.25, I’ll give you the rest when we get back. They should have enough of a force to repel the Imperial fleet… I hope.

Picard: Done and done. Now hustle your bustle people, if the Empire has discovered our position we need to move quickly.

Maloney: Roger.

Mari: Call you when you get back.

The comms click off.

Maloney: Are you sure that it’s such a good idea to go to your Rebel base?

Cywren: It’s not ideal but it’s the closest place we can get to before they arrive. Have you got a better suggestion?

Maloney: Hope they fly in single file and blast ‘em with the ship’s massively overpowered weapon?

Cywren: Yeah, I thought not.

Juliet: Leave him alone, he’s just trying to help.

Rimmer: I feel like we’ve forgot something…

Maloney: We haven’t got time to go back, let’s just get to the ship and get off to Cywren’s mystical base.

Maloney: As we speak their forces are advancing on our position, closing in on us. We can either run away and hide in the corner and possibly cry a bit, or we can stay and fight.

Picard: We've already exhausted the former option.

Maloney: Look, do you mind? I'm trying to do my log entry here. Some privacy please?

Picard: Fine, I’ll go… boldly.

Maloney: And another thing, stop referencing your old TV series with quotes.

Picard: I will make that so.

Maloney: Stop!

Picard chuckles and leaves.

Maloney: Hmm, where was I… Oh yeah, we’re all gonna die. Cywren has directed us to a rebel base a few lightyears away, they’re completely unaware the Empire is coming to kick their asses and they have minimal defense capabilities. We’re going down there to meet with the leaders and plan a counter-strike operation. I have to say, I’m concerned. Well, I say concerned. More just, ah… in a state of morbid conviction that the plan will fail spectacularly and end with us all either captured or killed. In any case, here they come. No turning back now. Now, I’m gonna stop hiding in this closet for a few minutes and help plan out our strategy.

Maloney half-opens the door, then closes it again.

Maloney: You know what, I’m just gonna stay in here.

Mari opens the door.

Mari: Why Captain, you never told me you were in the closet.

Maloney: Very funny. If you must know, I was recording my log entry in a nice, private space when Picard interrupted me.

Mari: Right, whatever you say.

Maloney: *sigh* Never mind. Just where can I find Cywren, is all.

Mari: Cywren’s over with Picard and Juliet at the other end of the flight deck. You can probably catch them if you catch a lift with my Enforcer.

Maloney: Eurgh, I hate Enforcers. They have all the looks, the speed and the maneuverability of a cow on macaroni.

Mari: Hey, when you have another way of getting around here, you go take that. It’s the Enforcer or walking.

Maloney: Can I drive?

Mari: In your wildest dreams.

Maloney: Caaaaaan I sit in the driver’s seat?

Mari: No.

Maloney: Can IIIIIIIII…

Mari: Do you want a lift or not?

Maloney: Yes.

Mari: Get in the passenger seat. And don’t stick pencils in the dash, I have to send this back when this is all over.

Maloney and Mari hop in the enforcer and drive across the massive hangar, past row upon row of X-Wings, Y-Wings and other various Star Wars ships. A very familiar large grey one stands quite prominently in the background. It is quite obviously the Falcon.

Maloney: They’ve redecorated, haven’t they? I don’t like it. Hey, is that Biggs? It is Biggs! Hey Biggs! Did you see that? That was Biggs!

Mari: Was it now? I thought it was Mary Queen of Scots.

Maloney: Oh wow, they’ve got a lot of people here! This is so awesome!

Mari: Yeah… Great.

Maloney: What’s getting you down?

Mari: You’ll see.

The car stops off at an ammunition depot. An instructor is explaining how to use an AR2 to a small group of people, Rimmer is among them.

Maloney: So where are they then?

Mari: Right over there, they’re just about to meet up with the commanders.

Maloney: Let’s go say hello.

Mari: You mind if I stay here?

Maloney: Yes, you’re much better at wording things than I am. Come on, and that’s an order.

Mari: Ah-ah-ah. No Starfleet, remember?

Maloney: Hmm… I’ll hide your stash.

Mari: Ha, you’re bluffing. You don’t know about my stash.

Maloney: Supposing I do. Supposing I could take it and hide it and you’d never find it. Can you really afford to take that risk? I bet Admiral Baxter would be very interested in finding out about the time you spelled “effective” with only one f.

Picard: *whispers* I think it’s John. *out loud* And this here is Juliet, she was one of the prisoners on the Dalek homeworld of Skaro before she escaped with us. She’s quite the fighter, she was accidentally given the abilities of a shape-shifting mutant during a lab accident.

Dodonna: My goodness, what’s that like?

Juliet: It has its perks. Mostly it’s a bit of a pain.

Dodonna: Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.

Juliet: I’m used to it.

Picard: And last, but by no means least, the most esteemed member of our humble crew, Miss Cywren Caster, alias Ghost Babel.

Maloney & Mari: WHAT!?

Dodonna: So you’re Ghost Babel?

Maloney: Did you know about this?

Cywren: That’s me. Cywren Caster at your service.

Mari: First I’ve heard of it.

Dodonna: It’s a pleasure to finally meet you in person, I’ve so looked forward to this day.

Mari: You remember, the mission on Skaro to rescue Starbug? That was why we came to pick you up in the first place? You put out an ad?

Cywren: I don’t know what you’re talking about, I was on Station 897 for months before you came.

Maloney: What do you mean, you’d been there for months? I met you on Persephone not- actually, how long has it been? Can’t be more than a few weeks, can it? Just before we came to pick you up, that Skaro mission. You hired my crew to rescue Starbug from the Daleks?

Cywren: I was never on Persephone, I don’t know why you think I was.

Maloney: Because you were, I talked to you! I kept annoying you by reintroducing myself repeatedly.

Cywren: Yeah, that sounds a lot like you.

Maloney: You were there, I remember you.

Cywren: It can’t have been me, I was here the entire time.

Maloney: And you were blonde.

Cywren: I was what?

Maloney: Blonde. Like, actual blonde hair.

Cywren: I was blonde?

Maloney: Very blonde.

Cywren: Me?

Maloney: You were blonder than Debbie Harry.

Cywren: Okay, you’re delusional.

Maloney: Who’s the more foolish, the fool or the fool who follows?

Cywren: It’s still you, because I’ve never been blonde in my life.

Maloney: Uh-huh. Well, you guys probably have lots to get on with, so we’ll just leave you to it, as it happens we’ve got some quite important stuff to catch up on right now, isn’t that right girls?

Mari: Uh, yeah.

Juliet: Definitely.

Cywren: I guess you’re right, there’s still some things me and Picard have to finish up on. I’ll catch you three later?

Mari: Sure, we’ll talk then.

Cywren: Okay, in a bit then!

Cywren leaves.

Maloney: 6 months. That’s not long before…

Mari: That’s right.

Juliet: Wait, the ship I was on launched 6 months ago!

Mari: The plot thickens.

Maloney: Like Rimmer’s gazpacho soup.

Juliet: That was one heck of a random metaphor.

Mari: That’s one of the very few things he excels at.

Maloney: What does it mean? Has Cywren been leading us on all this time? What’s she doing, and why? What’s the end to all this?

Juliet: Hey, hey! You two. Focus. Okay, here’s a plan: I’ll go find out what Picard knows- in a way that Mari won’t object with. You two need to stay here and help prepare for the attack. I’ll join up with you in around twenty minutes.

Dent: Oh that is it. I was gonna take it easy on you, but that cuts it.

Palpatine: Can you guys keep it down? I don’t want to miss the other fight!

Future Cywren: VADER!

Vader: Finally, someone remembers the name. And I see you have a new… mech-suit thing. That won’t help you here.

Future Cywren: Oh, you don’t even know the half of it.

Cywren: Not if I have anything to say about it!

Vader: Wait, what?

Future Cywren: What!? How?

Maloney: You really think I wouldn’t know how to track down myself? Now, would you mind explaining to me exactly what’s going on?

Future Cywren: Stay out of this Cywren, this has nothing to do with you!

Vader: Wait, there’s two of you?

Future Cywren: Well done Sherlock.

Vader: Hey, there’s no call for that!

Sidious: What’s going on?

Vader: There’s two of her!

Sidious: What do you mean there’s two of her?

Vader: I mean, there’s two of her!

Mari: Anything going on over there? We’ve almost got-

Future Cywren: Oh boy, this is about to get crowded.

Cywren: Never thought I’d end up arguing with myself.

Maloney: Hey, I want in on that Pizza.

Vader: Oh great, as if this wasn’t confusing enough!

Maloney: Are you the Pizza man?

Mari: I’m not the Pizza man!

Sidious: He wasn’t talking to you!

Maloney: Hey, don’t speak to her like that!

Vader: Oh shut up!

Maloney: You shut up!

Picard: Hey guys, you’ll never guess what we’re in!

Sidious: Wow, I didn’t even know this thing could get four way. You have a really nice voice, by the way.

Picard: Why thank you.

Mari: What is it?

Picard: Team Deathmatch.

Sidious: Team Deathmatch?

Maloney: Team Deathmatch?

Mari: Team Deathmatch?

Vader: Team Deathmatch?

Juliet: Team Deathmatch?

Kylo Ren: Team Deathmatch?

Cywren: Team Deathmatch?

Future Cywren: Team Deathmatch?

Rimmer: Team Deathmatch?

Casey: Team Deathmatch?

Picard: Team Deathmatch.

Maloney: Team Deathmatch!

Vader: Team Deathmatch:

Juliet: Team Deathmatch!

Rimmer: Team Deathmatch!

Mari: Team Deathmatch!

Kylo: Team Deathmatch!

Maloney: Team-

Sidious: OH MY GOD STOP IT!

Maloney: Waaaaahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Sidious: No, don’t- Agh, alright, you can do it one more time, alright? Just one more.

Maloney: One more?

Sidious: Yeah, just get it out of your system.

After a moment, Maloney stops looking upset and looks up intently as dramatic music plays.

Sidious: Oh, really!?

The music continues for about 40 seconds.

Sidous: You’re really doing this, aren’t yo-

Maloney: TEAM DEATHMATCH!

Vader: Can someone please explain to me what’s going on?

Maloney: Okay, I think I have this all figured out now, it all makes sense to me. I’ve been so slow but I got there in the end. The Cywren that hired us to steal Starbug from the Daleks job is not the same Cywren we picked up on Space Station 987-whatever it was. Think about it for a moment, she knew who we were and why we were there but when I asked her about the mission, she didn’t know what I was talking about! And she was blonde! Why was she blonde? That’s because this was a Cywren from the double double future, something happens in the future, something bad enough that she had to come back and try again. Why the change of hair colour, I don’t know, but I’m sure it’s relevant somehow.

Future Cywren: Maybe the whole Gingerian thing?

Cywren: What?

Maloney: Oh yeah, in the future Gingers are considered an alien species and exiled from Earth.

Cywren: Wait, what?

Luke: Okay, that is really offensive. My wife’s ginger, for crying out loud!

Rimmer: You’re not married to Cywren, are you?

Luke: What?

Cywren: Noooooooo.

Rimmer: Shame, you two would make a great couple…

Mari: Rimmer? Stop talking and that’s an order.

Rimmer: Yes sir ma’am.

Future Cywren: Yeah, the system is stupid. Just roll with it for now.

Maloney: See, what our Cywren was doing was nothing to do with that, because she didn’t know at that time what was going to happen. Everything she was doing was completely unrelated, she was only interested in aiding the rebels. Which brings me onto the second point: the Empire. There’s a massive three-way divide between you guys, mainly because of the opposition between emotionally immature Kylo, grumpy old man the Emperor, depressed Vader, etc. Then you got all that stuff with Thrawn and Spencer and the really scary dude.

Juliet: What does that have to do with us?

Maloney: Nothing, I was just pointing out that they were really badly organized. So basically we’re a surprisingly well-organized group of ragtag rebels outwitting a surprisingly disorganized Empire. Long story short, we are all stuck… In a giant… Team Deathmatch.

There is a moment of silence. Kylo peppers two rebels with lasers.

Kylo: Eh, those guys had it coming.

[between]

Sir, there’s a whole group of ships coming – and they’re Federation!

A fleet of Federation Starships warp in, headed by the USS Enterprise.

Kirk (comms): This is Captain James T Kirk of the Starship Enterprise. Not to brag, but you are severely outmatched and outgunned. If you’re smart, and you sure as hell don’t look it, you’ll drop you weapons, stop your attack on Starfleet Personnel operating on a Starfleet-protected planetoid, and go home. I’ll give you a minute to think about that.

This was awesome! I take it after being shot, Casey takes the Star Destroyer and crashes it into the Super Star Destroyer? Anyways, maybe soon we can get to work on the placeholders, rewrites for the other episodes, and actually writing episodes 5, 6, and 7.

Feelings, definitely. I've got some great ideas for that one, I stuck them on Nar Shaddaa and there's gonna be a Jasper-like character and one of those 30's gangster-style characters and a whole bunch of Star Wars characters - and I wanna stick someone in from Blake's 7 too!

I guess Bad Planet should go concurrently with that, I think we can do that one like in Shaun of the Dead, have you ever sent that film? XD it's hilarious! It's got Simon Pegg and Nick Frost in it, you know those guys? Hot Fuzz, Paul, the Satellite 5 Editor and Father Christmas in Doctor Who? Just wanna make sure, y'know? Anyway, I think someone sent Jordan a Shaun-inspired poster called "Venturian of the Dead" in an episode of VMail, but he didn't get the reference. And for some reason I've got White Forest from HL2:EP2 in my mind for this one, which makes no sense. XD

It makes sense to finish the finale after that, I think we got that one covered. It's just a case of filling in the blanks depending on what happens in the other two episodes.

Finally, since this one doesn't really relate much to the rest of the season, I think we'll do Initiation last. I guess partly because I'm still putting off asking for help from ykw.

Ooh, that sounds cool! That may be the way to introduce Kyle and Jan into the series, and I was thinking maybe throw Thrawn in there too? Maybe as a cameo? Would the Jasper guy kind of be some sort of stalker to Juliet? Or would that be the gangster? I've never seen Blake 7, but feel free to throw in whoever you want to.

I've heard of it, but never seen it. Simon Pegg I know played Scotty in the new Star Trek films and was Unkar Plutt in The Force Awakens (as well as Dengar in The Clone Wars), and Nick Frost sounds familiar...

All right, sounds good. Were you referring to Sky or Myst with the ykw?

Yeah, Blake's 7 was an alright series, if not for its, shall we say "limited" budget. The basic plot was a political dissident fighting for freedom against a tyrannical space empire is thrown in with a gang of convicts who somehow gain control of an advanced spaceship... Hang on, this is sounding strangely familiar...

XD That's funny...wait a minute, was that the "low-budget '90s sci-fi series" that Maloney alluded to in TakeOff?! Were you planning on having the dissident and his team there on Nar Shaddaa? Maybe he and Maloney could be having a conversation and both eye each other suspisciously when they relate their stories.

Probably, it's just a case of finding them. Jill Valentine is pretty close to Jenna Stannis and the dude from Alien: Isolation kinda looks like Avon. Blake's gonna be difficult because Gareth Thomas has - or rather had - curly hair, which is not something that you often get on Source. Dunno about the ships or the rest of the characters, I'll look further into it.

4 seasons. I don't think it's on Netflix (I don't think so but I wouldn't know since I don't have Netflix). I did hear that Microsoft was gonna remake it as an Xbox Live Xclusive but I've not heard much on that front so I imagine that was a dead end.

True. I guess that was partly the fault of the fanbase. When it first came out they pretty much took it for granted that it was going to get cancelled and didn't really connect with it until it actually WAS cancelled due to low ratings because the fanbase weren't connecting with it because they figured it was going to get cancelled so they didn't watch it so Fox cancelled it. Logic? Still, Serenity was an alright continuation, plus the original Firefly's coming back this year. That is, the series that Joss nicked the plot from, as he always does. It was a 2001-2003 Canadian-American series - I think I've mentioned this before - called Starhunter. That was like a cross between Blade Runner and the Bounty Hunters of Star Wars, I think you'd like it.

Ah, I see. I did find a video on YouTube of Nathan Fillion and Alan Tudyk showing off a campaign on one of those fundraising sites for a Season 2 of Firefly.

That sounds pretty interesting! Also, I've been watching more Firefly recently. I kinda lost track, but I watched like four episodes yesterday back-to-back. I was wondering...is there any way to possibly feature the crew of the Serenity in Starbuggers?

Unlikely since there's no Source models for them that I know of, I guess I could check on gmod.org or ModDB or try the Workshop. We've already got the ship in there and Mal's mentioned in the first episode during a drinking game with... Oh... Captain Spaghetti and Captain Maloney...

Oh, okay. I think I'll take a go at writing the script for Bad Planet and see how that goes. Let's see, all that we had planned was that Maloney, Rimmer, Juliet, and Cywren were going to Nar Shaddaa and Picard, Mari, and a team of crewmen were going to the surface to search for [what was it again? a base or something else?] and ultimately are attacked by the Undead zombies.

A question I had for this episode: should we maybe have one of the characters from that short story I wrote, The Undead, pop up? Or should they appear in a later episode or not at all?

Yeah, that was about right. Was it a base? Ive got the description here.

When Maloney, Cywren, and Juliet leave for a mission in the underworld of a dangerous planet, Mari, Picard, and a crew of guardsmen and scientists head to a *seemingly* uninhabited planet, where they encounter a horde of zombie-like creatures, which make short work of their escort. When communications are cut short, Mari assembles a rescue team to thwart the feast about to be made of the two crew-members.

Hmm. Maybe we should plan this out a little more. Tell you what, let's plan out Bad Planet and Feelings consecutively so that they run side-by-side.

Okay. I think I was planning for them just to investigate the planet and find out whether or not it was inhabitable. Also, with Avani now a member of the crew with Myst voicing her, should she go with Maloney, Juliet, Cywren, and Rimmer, or stay with Picard, Casey, and Mari?

Sounds good. So, like have Cywren see a dark-haired person from behind and starts to yell "Timebomb!" but one of the zombies jumps out at her and cuts her off, and then next thing you know Timebomb's nowhere to be found?

No, I wasn't very clear on that. It doesn't really matter anyway, we could stick it in pretty much any time. I guess having that Timebomb scene you suggested in Bad Planet might work, but it would probably make more sense to have him in Purge Environs since we're establishing how the next series is gonna go.

Wait, I got an idea now for why Picard and Mari have gone to the planet! Maybe the crew needs to go to Nar Shaddaa because there's something to do with either Cywren or Juliet there, but there's not enough fuel for Starbug to get there. So Maloney, Cywren, Juliet, and Rimmer take a shuttle and fly to the planet while Picard and Mari take Starbug to a nearby planet with a fueling post on it -- the Bad Planet! *Dun-dun-dun*

Oh, I don't know if you've been keeping up with the Star Wars Celebration, but a lot of awesome stuff's come out! First a new Rogue One featurette (a new 3 minute trailer was supposed to come out--with VADER!--but it never did), and then an AMAZING Season 3 trailer for Rebels. And the best part is...

...THRAWN IS NOW CANON! WOO-HOO!

But, besides that, Wedge Antilles's origins are explored--he was once a TIE pilot who defected to the Rebellion--and Kanan is looking more like Rahm Kota from The Force Unleashed (Maul gave him a good slice across the eyes in Season 2) and, now, Ezra looks like Starkiller (Galen Marek). A new giant guy named the Bendu (in between the dark and light sides of the Force) appears, as do new Imperial Mandalorians, who look like the white concept armor Boba Fett. Man, I am so pumped up right now!

Oh, no, I was meaning here on the Starbuggers Wiki. But dA would work as well. Only problem is, last time I tried to get into a group chat on dA, I needed something installed but I wouldn't install or something.

It's an app gamers use to type and livechat. I chat on there with my mate Deadp- I mean ExShade. I also recently joined the RTSL group on there and, quite by chance, met one of the guys also working on the same mod as me. It was short but sweet, he seems really cool.

Oh, by the way, have you ever heard of the app/program called Plotagon? I've just gotten into it, and you can use it to make your own animations and stuff. Nothing too large, though- only two characters per scene and you can only really have conversations or slap-fights. It does have a nice character creation option, though. I've already made a good handful of characters, and made a Star Trek animation on there.

It's called Star Trek Voyages, you can try searching it up with the hashtag #stvoyages in the search menu. I'm just warning you, though--it's not that good. But, I guess for my first animation it wasn't all too bad.

Wow, thanks! I didn't know it was that good. More episodes are coming soon, as well as a Star Wars mini series and a Batman series. Maybe even something with VT...I've already got the Fryes and the PIE team made.

Hey, I've had this idea for a while now of a mockumentary about Starbuggers featuring the cast in-character discussing the making of the pilot and the other characters. Maybe have some "behind the scenes" footage of setting up for the shooting. And cutaways of interviews! How does that sound to you?

I've got an idea for that. Ever seen Acorn Antiques? It was a parody of this really cheap, really shoddy series called Crossroads by the recently deceased Victoria Wood, and I think the TMO for that could work as a base for us. Or maybe do it in the style of The Office.

Could I have some help with this? I think the prologue should start with Mari receiving news that Brady is dead, and then go to Juliet after that. Also, do you think it would be a good idea to have this story told from different perspectives, like Picard and Maloney simultaneously telling their own side of the tale? Could be great for comic effect, havi one person blow something out of proportion and then the other person very bluntly deflating that? They'd have to be telling it separately so the stories don't run over each other, and I figure at the end of the episode you have Picard just sat in the room alone recounting the story to himself! XD

Sure! Maloney could make himself out to be the big hero of the story, while Mari tells an exciting, bang-boom-pow story. Picard could be the one who gives the boring, fact-filled one. By the way, who's Brady?

XD I guess it'll be finished in the episode? Oh, and on the point of stories, how about we write, in between series, either short stories or novels acting as companions to the show? Or should it just be episodes-only?

I see. Maybe have each character having a different type of way of explaining their backstory? Maybe have a series of novels or stories following the adventures of Maloney, Rimmer, Mari, and the rest of the WYM crew, and have an audio story about Cywren. I dunno.

Actually, a cool fact is that the author of the first book in the new canon of Star Wars (A New Dawn) speaks towards the "Legends" material. He says that even though they may all not fit into the same timeline, they all do matter very much.

Yeah. There was, though, a character who resembled Thrawn at the end of the first book of The Aftermath Trilogy by Chuck Wendig, but not much else was said other than that he was the top command in the Empire after the Emperor's death. And we have Jacen Solo's equivalent with Kylo Ren. Oh, this reminds me: I want to have TR-8R in the series at some point. I don't care if there's just a shot of a First Order stormtrooper saying "Traitor!" but I just want him in there!

It's possible, but I don't think they'd reveal her as Obi-Wan's daughter in it. She'd be a little too young to be apart of much of the action, though. She's only be about fifteen years old, if she is the same age as Luke. She could be older than him, though.

Well, in The Clone Wars, Obi-Wan meets an old friend of his when he served with Qui-Gon before Episode I and, after spending time with her, admits that he would've left the Jedi Order to be with her. And, whoever Obi-Wan's wife was, probably wouldn't want Obi-Wan to know about the child so he would've jeopardize his career as a Jedi Knight, so kept their daughter a secret from him, as well as the fact that the girl's father was a Jedi war veteran. I don't know if at some point Obi-Wan's wife would've told the daughter, or if she found out herself. As for Luke, when he reforms the Jedi Order, it may not have been a forbidden thing to love someone and marry them. Look what he started with Leia and, in several books and comics in both the new canon and Legends, he has several romantic relationships (he ended up marrying Mara Jade).

Speaking of Mara, that makes me think: when are we gonna throw her, Kyle, and Jan into the mix? I was thinking maybe at the end of series one or sometime early on in series two that we bring in Luke, Leia, Han, Chewie, and some other characters from the Original Trilogy, but should we bring the old EU characters in the same time? Also, what time in their lives would it be? Would Mara still be the Emperor's Hand, or would she be in a relationship with Luke? And I would guess that Kyle and Jan are part of the Alliance, as well.

So, maybe she went on a mission for the Emperor, but while on it she met Luke and the two began to bond, but she still didn't want to leave the Emperor, so she'll be struggling with her choice while still apart of the Empire?

Okay, thanks! Where would the Rebellion be against the Empire at this time? Would it be like them as a struggling force with the Empire's brute strength, or are they beginning to overpower them? I think it would be interesting to have them be in deep water with their fleet split up and resources low, and they have to turn to Maloney to help them.

I had been meaning the second series, but I see your point in the second message. How about none of the other factions trust the Empire at first (I remember seeing that you put that Spaghetti helped steer them to the Milky Way galaxy), but when they see how brutal and fearsome the Empire is, they decide they'd rather join forces than battle them.

Sorry, it didn't come out how I meant for it to: the Empire shows up and none of the other evil factions trust them. Once they see how terrifying and cruel the Empire is, they decide it would be wiser to join with them than engage with them in battle.

Yeah! I've already got a great idea for one involving Cywren stopping a guy who's planning to bomb his own passenger liner to collect the insurance. (Yeah, it's a little low-brow in comparison, but it's the sort of thing Cywren would get into...)

With a fumbled speed unbefitting his age Saul Tython Oomanchen raced around his office, packing as much as he could into his large black briefcase. Toothbrush. Burger. Tiny little mascot statue of Jim Bexley Speed, the sporting legend.

Screw it, take everything, he thought as he wrenched a second edition of the Magna Carta off of the wall to reveal a safe.
Still piling things into the bag, he stuck his thumb in a little groove on the side and, when the door popped open, swept the contents in with his hand.

He checked his watch. 4:17.

He still had 9 minutes to get off of the ship before it blew.
Saul was an entrepreneur, if nothing else.

His company had started the interest in trans-stellar luxury cruise.

Recently, however, the company had fallen on hard times. The war had affected business adversely. His accountant had predicted bankruptcy in less than a month. Foreclosure notices followed suit. Unpacked bills. His contenders closed in like a pack of wolves hungry for the kill.

Well, thought Oomanchen as he slammed the bag closed and ran for the door as fast as his pudgy legs could carry him, I'm not going down alone. I'm gonna take the whole trade with me!
It was a simple plan, really. A small nuclear device attached to the second engine manifolds was set to detonate in 8 minutes. Nothing major; just enough to destroy a quarter of the ship. The attack would, of course, be blamed on terrorists. Paranoia would rise; the war would get worse; and most importantly, thought Oomanchen, the travel industry would cease to exist.

Who was to profit? Him. He could claim insurance on the liner and take at least a small profit with him before he vanished completely. Where would he go? Somewhere nice, he thought to himself. Somewhere with a beach and dazzling girls. He heard Ursa Minor Beta was good this time of year for people who didn't plan on living too long; where better to hide?

He checked his watch again as he neared the emergency shuttle. 6 minutes. He was running out of time; he wouldn't be able to get out of range if he didn't hurry.

Oh no, he thought as he turned the corner, it's that irritating security guard again.

At that same moment, the guard saw Oomanchen and thought exactly the same thing about him. As it happened, Evan had just spent the last thirty minutes having a unusual day running around with a girl he hardly knew for reasons he barely understood himself to do with the security of the ship. And in this case, had just heard something very interesting about Mr. Oomanchen.

"Lost again Mister Oomanchen?" He said in a jocular tone. Not wanting to be hassled a second time about unauthorised shuttle entry and definitely too close to the end timer to want to discuss it, Oomanchen pulled out an M6D Personal Defence Weapon System Pistol and, before he had time to react, shot him twice in the chest. He then pushed him out of the way as he jumped in the shuttle and closed the door.

On activation of the shuttle engines, the emergency bulkheads started to close. Evan, with all the strength he could muster, rolled himself onto the other side of the bulkhead doors and just barely evaded the intense hot blast of the shuttle raft engines as the doors closed. He star up straight and chuckled lightly to himself as he ripped off his best to reveal he was wearing a Kevlar vest with several burst bags of syrup down his front. He took a quick lick of the fake blood and gave a side wards nod of vague approval of the taste as he switched on the radio and informed his colleague that Oomanchen was no longer on the ship. The voice on the other side responded in the affirmative.

In the shuttle, Oomanchen checked his watch one more time. 3 minutes. He was nearly home free! The distance between them was increasing slowly, but just enough that he would be out of the blast radius in time. He laughed to himself with a hint of sadistic humour as he thought about the pool parties of Ursa Minor.

Would it be premature to open a bottle of Bollinger? Eh, why not. While the money was still in the bank, it wouldn't make any difference anyway. To hell with the taxmen. He set his briefcase down next to the computer screen. The time said 16:23.

Never mind; it wasn't a worry. He could just make it if he increased speed to maximum.

"You seem to be in quite the hurry mister Oomanchen."

Startled, Oomanchen turned around and found himself pointing the M6D at none other than Cywren Caster; that nuisance back on the ship. Despite raising her hands, she still had that infuriating air of smug confidence, of someone who was in control of the situation. She was wordlessly gloating at her own victory over him, as if she were the one holding the gun.
"Very clever, miss Caster. How did you work out that it was me?"

Cywren huffed derisively. "Oh please, don't flatter yourself. You're no mastermind. It was obvious from the beginning you were up to something. You practically left a trail of breadcrumbs leading from Sonny; to Burns; to you."

Oomanchen nodded. "How are my esteemed colleagues anyhow?"
"Sonny? Sonny' just fine, we caught him just before he set it off. He had no clue you were planning to betray him. Burns is a little... worse for wear; he just had a rather nasty accident during a shoot-out."

He nodded again and made a "hmm" noise. "He always was a loose end."

Cywren looked at him with disgust. "And you were incompetent. You seriously thought you could get away with... this. You were willing to kill hundreds of innocent people just to save your own filthy hide. Have you no morals?"

"Screw the morals, I have money! And I plan to keep my fortune, miss Caster! And despite your best efforts, you still won't be able to stop that bomb from going off! What you don't know is that it had a timer installed in case Sonny didn't come through. Call it redundancy."

Cywren cocked her head to one side, a wry look on her face. "What, you mean this bomb?" She held up the nuclear device.
Oomanchen stared at it in horror. He looked back at the clock. Ten seconds. Without thinking he dropped the gun and scrambled for the bomb, knocking it out of Cywren's hands and sending it clattering to the floor. He desperately jumped down at it and pulled off the casing. Five seconds. Which was the disconnect or wire? It was always the red one right? Oh god. They're all blue!

"You stupid- don't you see what you've done!. Were all gonna die!"

"Yes" said Cywren, "so it would appear."

Oomanchen stared uncomprehendingly at her flippant response before looking down and wincing as the bomb started beeping. He looked away and waited for the inevitable.

Chink.

Nothing happened.

He opened his eyes. He was now handcuffed. The bomb's LED screen now said "have a nice day :)". He nodded again with sudden realisation. He was booked.

"Like I said" said Cywren, "it was obvious what you were up to. I just happened to get to you first. In other words, mister Oomanchen, consider yourself under civilian arrest until such time as the authorities can take you in. I sincerely hope that they never let you out for what you tried to do."

There wasn't much talking after that.

"You did a good job back there, Cy." Evan still had a sore chest from the experience, but he was healing well. "If that slime all had got away-"

Cywren nodded. There would've been no evidence. To all intents and purposes, Saul Oomanchen would be legally dead.

"So how would he claim the insurance money then, if everyone thought he was dead?" Evan thought out load.

He was right, Cywren thought. One massive oversight in his riddled-with-oversights plan. How he managed to become head of a travel company was anyone's guess.

Evan cleared his throat. "You still think about Avalon, don't you?"

She didn't turn around, and she didn't answer immediately. "I don't want to talk about it."

Evan nodded. "You're gonna tell somebody someday. I guarantee it." And with that he set his mobility chair in reverse and hovered away.

Thanks! I searched for Timebomb, but couldn't see anything. There is something, though, that might work if you want to check it out. There's a pack out there of Alien v. Predator marines, the only had the picture of a small selection of them.

The Marines idea's not bad, but we're gonna have to explain why Timebomb and Sarah (if I can find the best models; I won't be able to check them properly until at least tomorrow, not including re-installation time - it's too muddy to walk, I can't drive, my bus pass doesn't do weekends, my mum refuses to give me a lift until tomorrow because we "urgently" need to defrost the freezer RIGHT THIS SECOND or we're all gonna die apparently) are now in the Starship Troopers.

Okay, sure. In the movie, he's a sailor on the USS Eldridge during the second world war during the testing for a new untested radar cloaking device, but something goes wrong and they accidentally tear a hole in spacetime that sends him and his mate Jimmy to 1980's Nevada, where a similar experiment was also happening, and drives across the country to California, whilst being chased by the cops and the army, with help from Jimmy, future Jimmy and this girl Allison that he accidentally had to kidnap and now has a crush on. Anyway, eventually he meets the guy running both projects, who tells him that the only way to stop the giant wormhole in the sky from destroying the world is if he goes in and turns off the Eldridge's power himself, as that's what's keeping it open. Anyway, he does and somehow manages to get back to the 80's again before the votex closes. He then settles down with Allison, they have a kid together, and then she unexpectedly passes away. 9 years later, an unrelated experiment to use the technology to teleport a nuclear stealth bomber sends it back to Germany at the height of the Third Reich, thus changing the outcome of the war. History changes and Herdeg is suddenly thrown into an alternate history where the Nazis won (as you do). The only other guy who remembers the original timeline, the guy who sent the bomber, persuades Herdeg to go back in time and destroy the bomber. He succeeds, but the guy's father (who was a German scientist and, coincidentally, the guy who discovered the bomber) is accidentally killed and the guy is erased, thus preventing the whole thing from ever occuring. The original actor also appeared in the remake, working for the villains.

Why not do what Starhunter did? Split the whole crew up in space and time. Stick someone in hyperspace, send someone back, send someone forward, do nothing with someone else, out someone in stasis, stick Cywren on Nirn...

No, there is an explanation, it's just really complicated. Travis, Dante's infant son whom he's been searching for ten years, is now nearly an adult because of the gravity difference. He's now the head Raider, and he knows Dante's been looking for him, so he sends his sort-of girlfriend Salomea to pick up his cousin Percy. Seneca, Travis' mentor/kidnapper/father figure, disapproves of this, and arranges a trade with Dante for his son and niece in exchange for the seeds he got earlier from his late friend, which he says he's going to use to restore life to the barren Earth. Dante agrees but finds out too late that the seeds are actually a bioweapon to destroy Earth.

Meanwhile the Orchard, the people chasing after the Divinity Cluster, send off someone to get Travis (who has it) and Eccleston (who randomly appears in a bar despite having been sent to another dimension in the first episode). Travis and Dante have a chat with Penny's hologram, who explains that she was in the Orchard and she did experiment with the Cluster on their son and apologises to them both.

Salomea helps the crew escape but is shot herself in the process. Dante forgives Luc for having to lie to him from the beginning and she joins up with her late father's resistance group on Mars to help stop or at least delay the Raiders.

Back on the Tulip, Eccleston pops out of nowhere and tells Dante and Travis that the Cluster was re-engineered after the designers deemed humanity a failed experiment, and will destroy them all if enough people are ascended, which he hopes to prevent - with their help. It then turns out that the Orchard and the Raiders were in league the whole time. Eccleston helps Dante unlock the Cluster and they use it to beat Seneca to Earth.

Despite the intrigue, Seneca and Orchard head Tosca plan to take Travis and destroy the Tulip. The ship is disabled by an EMP and the AI Caravaggio is sent offline. They prepare to evacuate whilst Tosca threatens Luc, who was captured. Percy decides to remain behind to try and reboot the systems. Taking a shuttle down, Travis uses the power to redirect the seeds but the shuttle runs out of fuel and starts to re-enter Earth's atmosphere. The seeds are released and the Raiders start attacking. Percy manages to reboot Caravaggio just before they fire and Eccleston sends the Tulip into hyperspace to save them. Tosca, in a fit of rage, seemingly kills Luc.

Travis and Dante try to use the Cluster to escape. Dante finds himself back on Titan, exactly one minute before the Raider attack that cost him his wife and child.

Oh, man - I saw this and while I was visiting my Grandma's on my iPad and meant to delve into it further when I got back on the computer. Sorry. I think it sounds really interesting. So maybe send the remaining main cast members into different paths after the theft of Starbug or something - maybe even send Cywren back in time to the scene where Timebomb was captured?

Sorry about that, I was just venting my frustration. Nothing personal, I shouldn't have done that. Yeah, that sounds good. I've got an idea for series 2 - how about have Maloney missing and everybody's out looking for him? And just to cap it all off, we can have a character who's very, very similar to Maloney to replace him! (But a little bit less of an idiot... but not TOO much.)

Oh, don't worry, I can see where you were coming from. That's an interesting story idea you've got there... Would we make a new character, or would someone - maybe Rimmer? - take the role? Also, I am now undertaking a daring task: I am trying to go through the entire Star Wars Legends continuity, in chronological order. I'm going to read as many novels/short stories that I can, and watch all of the TV episodes and films. I've already started with the "Dawn of the Jedi: Into the Void" novel, which takes place 25,000 years before The Phantom Menace!

I was referring to the old, but I guess both. In the newer canon, I'm almost up-to-date with everything. That's one of the things I'm happy about: I can jump onto everything that comes out and stay caught up! In the new canon, I've seen all seven movies (of course- what kind of a Star Wars fan would I be if I haven't? XD), all of the TV episodes, and have read all but five novels, yet I've still got a chunk of the comics to get through.

Yeah, when I'm going through Legends, I'm not even going to TRY reading the comics. There are so many of them. In the new canon I've just gone with the main Star Wars series (just because, well, it's the main one, with the main heroes) and certain miniseries. I've gotten a complete set of one four-parter that takes place immediately after Episode VI, that introduces Poe Dameron's parents, two rebel soldiers who served under Han's strike force on Endor. That series, and I've also got issue one in an Obi-Wan and Anakin five-parter, but I haven't had any luck finding Part 2.

Well, if it's anything that I can do without reading for myself, I'll look it up on Wookieepedia. It's just that with the comics, I really want to read them myself. But, if it comes down to it, maybe I'll jump on Wookieepedia after the series is over. Have you watched Star Wars Rebels before?

Oh. I'd recommend checking it out at any chance you'd get. The first season's kind of slow getting into - there's even an episode where the plotline is just the team stealing a special, rare fruit (which is eventually used as a weapon to knock a stormtrooper OFF of a ground ship...yeah) - but season two is a WHOLE lot better. Partly - maybe even more than partly - is because of Darth Vader.

Well, not skipping it. I'd say watch the first episode/TV movie, but then the next few episodes don't really play into the overall story. There are some, though, that have cool bits in them. For example, episode two features R2 and 3PO, and a later episode has Lando in it.

It sure is. The only Rebels DVD I have is the pilot movie, and it was $13 when I bought it. It's now gone down to $8, but I wanted it as soon as possible to check it out. Even thought it did come out the same day on TV, but, being a Star Wars fan, it was a necessity.

I watched the first of Rated Lexx. I think, now that I've seen this one, possibly one of the other ones on your channel. Don't know which one, though, I jumped in right in the second or third I believe.

Sorry man, totally forgot about the brain stuff. Still, it is a semi-important plot point in the series. Jst don't be eating or thinking of food at the same time. Or vice versa, that won't work out too good either.