Whenever you eat a Swedish meatball or buy a piece of affordable flat-pack furniture, think of Darwin, better known as Ikea monkey, swinging from the lush tree limbs of Sunderland, Ontario and be glad. Never again will he be forced to don a shearling coat and wander North York’s asphalt wastes.

Earlier today, Story Book Farm Primate Sanctuary issued a press release saying that Yasmin Nakhuda, Darwin’s one-time owner, is no longer pursuing an appeal of her failed attempt to persuade the courts to return the monkey to her custody. Darwin has been living at Story Book Farm since December 2012, when Nakhuda surrendered him to Toronto Animal Services after he was spotted wandering in the parking lot of the North York Ikea.

In her lawsuit against Story Book Farm, Nakhuda claimed that she had never intended to transfer ownership of Darwin. She lost, and in January was ordered to pay more than $83,000 in legal fees. With the lawsuit finally over, the sanctuary expects to be Darwin’s permanent home. The press release says that he has “grown in strides” and “is learning to be more monkey than human.”

Well the sanctuary is run by idiots. What a colossal, titanic waste of donor’s money. Are they going to spend tens of thousands of dollars “rescuing” every exotic pet they come across? Why should anyone ever give a dime to an organization that doesn’t know how to pick its battles and use money properly?