Africa is a continent on the move and the youths seem to be disconnected from any form of leadership or vision to help them take the continent to the next level. MentorAfrica looks to help youths, through various life transition mentoring topics, to prepare youths for development and leadership whenever the need arises.

We know how cumbersome it can be to carry excess baggage
when we travel especially if we have to carry some on our person. They slow you
down, they weigh you down and they may even cause you to trip. Yet, some people
make it a habit of complicating their journey with so many luggages that they
are denied access to any means of transportation they have chosen. The exact
same thing happens to us in life when we clutter our lives with so many things
(relationships, habits, entertainment, etc) that we cannot recognize why our
purpose in life is not being fulfilled. Some of us have surrounded ourselves
with friends that are not going anywhere, yet we expect to get to our
destination. Some have destructive habits that they refuse to do anything about
and still hope to get some meaning out of life. Some spend so much time
entertaining themselves and yet wonder why they do not have enough time to
pursue what is important in their lives. All this is crazy but, the same people
turn around and criticize the system others have put on ground when they should
have been there to make their own vital contributions. Detoxify your life so
that all may benefit from those wonderful gifts you have which you have been
given to bless humanity with.

When we make up our minds to pursue our dreams, we must also
brace up ourselves to go the whole hog irrespective of what it will cost. What
stops most people from achieving their dreams is their inability to give total
commitment to its accomplishment. This halfhearted pursuit gives room for us to
quit immediately we face challenges that we think are insurmountable. Until we
decide that nothing can stop us and mean it, we will not be able to make any
considerable progress in our endeavor. You have to decide before you start your
journey to burn the bridge linking you to where you are coming from so you are
sure that the option of going back is totally eliminated. So long as you have
this option available, almost all challenges will look insurmountable to you
but, when you know that you cannot retreat, you will fight with everything you
have got to accomplish your dream. We must remember the saying “no guts, no
glory” as we make our decision to pursue what we know is our contribution to
human existence.

Some think that having a vision means you have all it takes
to develop and achieve its full potentials. They go on without asking for the
much needed assistance that comes from the complimentary gifts of others. You may
be the visionary but all you can do is drive the vision; your competence is
measured by how you can manage those who will help you achieve your dream. It is
very important that you recognize your limits and admit that you need the
competences of others to realize your dream. When we try to operate in areas in
which we do not have the required gifts, we make a mess of all we have achieved
with our talents. Accepting that we have limitations is a sign of maturity and
not a sign of weakness as some overzealous visionaries think. Having the
strength of character to reach out to those who can help us takes a lot of
courage, do not hesitate to ask for needed help because of the fear of what
people will think. Let them say whatever they want, the end product will
determine who is right; everybody has a right to an opinion, you alone has the
power to interpret and actualize your vision by engaging whoever and whatever strategies
you deem fit.

I heard a man talking on radio yesterday but I can’t quite
remember what the topic was, anyway, the gist was on how we should put our
brains to use. He said working your brain demands a conscious effort; he added
that he had observed that many people are too lazy to exercise their brain. This
morning I actually started meditating unconsciously about what I heard
yesterday and I realized that the degree of mental laziness amongst us Africans
is astronomical. The problem is not the color of the skin or the size of the brain;
after all, organ transplants do not select color; it is the refusal to maximize
the capacity of the brain that makes it look as if one brain is superior to
another. While some are using their brains to figure out how to make things
better and life more functional, others are spending hours in front of the
television, playing games and entertaining themselves in many other ways that have
been thought out by those who work their brains. As we enjoy what others have
done to make life comfortable for us, we should not allow our brains to lie
fallow; these inventions should challenge us to work our brains and add our own
contributions. Some of our brains only function when we want to criticize what
others have done; I wish we could just push our brains a little further to see
what we can do differently to make what we do not like something that will
benefit people who might have the same concerns.

I presume that the two most important things for athletes to
focus on as they run the race are their lanes and the finish line. If they do
not keep to their lanes, they will be disqualified; if they do not make the
finish line, the race is not recorded for them because it is inconclusive. The same
applies to us we run the race of life; we must maintain our vision and we must also
be determined to make it to the end no matter how long it takes us. A lot of
people spread themselves thin trying to solve every challenge around them; you
are not meant to do everything. My honest advice to you is understand your
contribution and apply yourself to doing a good job and finishing it. Jumping form
pillar to post will just make you exhausted, it is like running in more than
one lane; the most likely end result is that you will not finish the race.

Learning a skill or improving your set of skills without a commensurate
expansion of your horizon will not lead to maximum success in your vision. Expanding
your horizon is something you have to do by readjusting or changing your
perspective completely. When your perspective is just to make a living by meeting
the needs of your family, you will be satisfied with simply earning a living
with your skills. However, when making an impact and living a legacy are your
driving force, you will go the extra mile because you know that humanity is
depending on you to make your contributions. An auto mechanic that wants to a
make a difference, for example, will look beyond the repairs that he is
carrying out to what he can contribute mechanically to forestall future
problems emanating from that system. This is a problem that is prevalent in
some developing countries because the mechanic is even looking forward to
having the car back with the same problem so he can continue to make some money
from that source. With this kind of attitude, creative juices, as they say,
cannot be released. When you refuse to see beyond the immediate need and
solution, you are bound to remain at the level of survival. Progress must be
made by looking at how you can become a long-lasting improvement to any
situation rather than being just a trouble shooter.

The amount of waste we allow in our various systems due to
lack of structure is colossal. We waste time, energy, human resources and even
money when we allow too many leakages through improper structures or complete
lack of structure. The unfortunate thing is that we try to solve problems that
stem from these leakages without realizing that they are a result of the faulty
structure we have in place. In country a where there are no proper taxation
structures, the economy leaks so much that the government and the entire
population suffer even when if they have abundant resources. Families that lack
structure allow for so much emotional and other leakages that they either fall
apart or they are highly dysfunctional. Small scale industries that are waiting
to grow before they have a proper organizational structure may never get there
because the chances of them going burst before they stand on their two feet are
very high. We need to pay close attention to structure at the point of starting
any venture in life, that way we can foresee the areas that are likely to have
leakages and put a structure in place to forestall such waste. Do not postpone the
setting up of structure; save yourself the pain of future loss and deep regret,
start on a proper structural footing.

No matter how much we talk about getting right and contributing
our quota to human development, it can never be overemphasized. The reason
being that we have all kinds of voices around us encouraging us to remain where
we are and take whatever life throws at us. We are meant to believe that we are
confined to a certain invisible strata of humanity and should be satisfied with
navigating within those parameters, as an African, I understand this perfectly.
The only way to escape this falsehood is to keep educating yourself about your
ability to do something important in society because all the information
readily available, especially in the media is to help keep you within “set down
parameters” that have no proven scientific backing. People have been put in
cultural, historical and all kinds of man-made boxes that make them think that
there is only so much they can achieve. In order to make something worth your
while and help your society, you have to expand yourself; go beyond what you
have been made to believe is your limit. Expand your horizons by thinking
differently. The way to start is always to ask yourself why it cannot be done;
all around us we meet with limitations that try to stop us from doing certain
things. The barrier breaker is always a question that begins with “why…..”

Allowing sycophancy to grow is not something a lot of people
think they will condone but they become involved with it either as sycophants
or the victims when they enter into situations that expose their weaknesses. When
people are confronted by circumstances in which they have to fight for what they
believe and they are not getting the needed support, they succumb to the demon
of sycophancy rather than pay the price of facing opposition. What most people
do not understand is that this demon will surely come to torment them later and
in some extreme cases sycophants turn around to destroy their victims; they
always go with the highest bidder which a can be an enemy of their victim. You do
not need sycophancy to succeed; you need a strong image of yourself and a good
vision of your purpose, period. THANK
YOU FOR READING THIS BLOG, PARTNER WITH US BY SHARING IT.

We come to very rough patches in life and are tempted to
quit completely or to make a dangerous detour which will take us totally of
course. The sad part is that a lot of us quit in these stretches that are meant
to prepare us for our glorious arrival; the character it takes to remain
steadfast in victory and success is developed during these times. The other
group will change their course to something less than they originally
envisioned when the going becomes too tough; they settle for less. This is the
path where your vision and intentions are tested; this is where almost
everybody will tell you it can’t be done and give you numerous examples of
those who have failed. These are the times that you begin to think you must
have made a mistake in the first place. At this point my honest counsel to you
is, check your intentions, check your strategies, check your relationships and
partnerships and make all necessary adjustments but never settle for “less”
unless you discover that “more” does not exist. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS
BLOG, PARTNER WITH US BY SHARING IT.

As ugly as the practice of sycophancy is, it has become widely
tolerated, especially by corrupt and non-performing leaders who need sycophants
to convince themselves that everything is fine. The stench of sycophancy is
most nauseating when it emanates from the quarters of leadership because it
strips the leader of the revered atmosphere that should be around him/her and
exposes the greed and foolishness. Real leaders should not permit sycophants
around them; this will help them select true advisers and creative minds that
will enable proper direction and progress. The line between those who have good
intentions and sycophants, in some cases. might be very slim but if the leader
is poised to deal with the menace of sycophancy and he/she is sure of
himself/herself, their sensitivity will be sharp enough to smell it. Those who
aspire to leadership positions, elective or otherwise, must have a mind to
serve, if not sycophants waiting in the wings will hijack the position.

I find it funny but quite disturbing when I see program
booklets for funeral services and the family is trying to scrape scraps
together embellished with bogus adjectives in order to make the life story of
the departed count for something. I think we can save our loved ones this
headache if we could do something with the lifetime and the generation we have.
I met someone who said her husband is always striving to do something about
challenges around him so that when his grandchildren ask him later in life what
his contributions were, he will have something to say. With a mindset like
that, there will always be something you can do to outlive you. This is what
people have done that has given them an alias; you do not have to mention their
names, just the label of their contribution/invention is enough to know who you
are talking about. There are those who only one word can describe, you do not
have to write a whole paragraph to introduce them. Live your life in such a way
that you have an alias not scraps of “life” that won’t make sense or inspire
anybody.

It is difficult to mix passion and pleasure unless we know
where to draw the line as to the amount of pleasure we can accommodate when
there is a choice to be made between passion and pleasure. The kind of sacrifice
that the passion to achieve your dream demands, does not give room for an
excessive pursuit of pleasure. A lot of people think that they can chase two
rats and get them both; to succeed in the accomplishment of your vision, you
should give it top priority. Many just slowdown in their journey immediately an
opportunity to have the fun they can afford presents itself; their excuse is
that “all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” Enjoy your journey but do not
allow your love of pleasure derail you. When there is a proper balance it will
be a healthy relationship but when passion is sacrificed on the altar of
pleasure, it will be highly regrettable. THANKS FOR READING THIS BLOG, PARTNER WITH US BY SHARING IT.

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Sycophants make their living by lying and exaggeration; they
prey on those who have such low self-esteem that they want validation from
others to function. Some may argue that it is not a matter of low self-esteem
but I think that those who encourage sycophants lack something they want others
to fill in for them. If you are sure of who you are and what you are doing you
will not need people to appraise you constantly. When people know that you can
tell when they are lying to you or exaggerating in what they are telling you, it
will discourage them from talking to you in that manner. Stopping people from
painting unsolicited pictures of you will also save you from getting a wrong
image of yourself. Those who are sure of themselves will allow only honest
evaluation from others. Stay true to yourself; this will help you sift the
appraisals that are coming from others and immediately you notice any form of
sycophancy, nip at the bud. This is the only sure way of making it to the top
and remaining there in peace.

Sycophancy is a very ugly word to a lot of people but many
are sycophants without realizing what they are doing. When I hear of sycophants
what comes to my mind is a breed of very deadly parasites that will not leave
their victims until they suck life completely out of them. Sycophants are so
directionless and lifeless that the only way they can survive is live off
others. The unfortunate thing is that their victims actually give them permission
to finish them off directly or indirectly. I want to submit that the common
ground between the sycophants and their victims is a combination of greed,
pride and inordinate ambition; whichever way things go in this kind of
relationship, it is always a lose/lose situation.

Everybody has the ability to dream but not everyone has what
it takes to make it happen; the strength and character. It is especially
difficult when it has not been attempted from your point of view before or when
nobody thinks it is a great idea. When you go with the flow, people love it
because it makes them feel at ease around you but when you are going against
the grain, they become uncomfortable around you because it reveals their ordinariness.
This kind of atmosphere around your dream demands that you develop the strength
of character that makes you look opposition in the eye and continue without
blinking. The unfortunate thing is that a lot of people have great ideas but
lack the courage it takes to interpret it so they do not even bother to step
out, they just freak out and continue with a mediocre life. Do what others have
done to make a difference, step into the water; it may not be as deep and as
dangerous as it looks, even if it is,you will find a way if you bold enough to
take the first step. THANKS FOR VIEWING THIS BLOG, PARTNER WITH US; SHARE IT!

The best way to assess your progress in whatever you do is
to ask yourself honest questions either from your personal observations or from
those of other people. To assume that all you are doing is right will be sheer
foolishness because even if you are on the right path it is possible that there
are some things you can do differently in order to get maximum results. It is
pertinent that we ask ourselves “what am I doing?” from time to time. Re-evaluating
our vision, our intentions, our strategies and our methods periodically is a
sign that we determined to reach our desired destination successfully. As we
have often said, the distance between theory and practice is long and winding
so constant self-examination will do us a lot of good. This will help us to
carry out the adjustments necessary, at any given time, to overcome challenges
and break new grounds that are important for the progress that we need to make.
There are no stereotypical ways of achieving success, there may be tested and
proven ways but every journey has its peculiar twists and turns. No matter how
smooth your journey is going, always stop at intervals and ask yourself
questions.

When we decide to do something worthwhile with the vision we
have, there will be many battles to fight but the important thing is to know
which battle will take you further and which will hinder you. All battles are
not destructive, there are battles we must fight if we have to make any form of
progress; these are the ones we should recognize and strategize to win. There is
no victory without a war and only those who fight can conquer. Until you know
which battle to give your attention to, you will continue to expend your
energies on things that you should ignore in order to face the real issues. The
more energy and time you spend on unimportant battles, the slower you travel on
your journey. There are distractions that will try to stop you; these come from
naysayers and malicious critics. Do not spend your time and energy trying to
respond to these people and situations if you intend to reach your goal and
make impact. When all is said and done, your results will prove your point and
make a lasting difference. The only way to choose your battles is to know
exactly what you are doing and where you are going.

When talking is all you can do, my sincere advice would be that you think through what you want to say properly before you open your mouth or touch your keyboard or pen because what you say has the ability to destroy or to build. It has become fashionable to air our opinion about everything and anything; all kinds of platform now exist and most of them are free so people just talk because it is cheap. What we do not realize is the fact that these opportunities are for us to make our mark and change society for the better but what I do not understand is how many have turned these into avenues of trivializing very important real life situations and talking about things they have little or no knowledge about making situations worse instead. The next time you want to discuss sensitive and life changing situations publicly, try to say things that will help the larger society instead of things that will provoke people to take actions that will jeopardize the lives of those around them. It is really not what you say that matters, it is how you play with words that will determine the kind of results you will get. Always seek to improve people and situations rather than trying to destroy with your words.

We often hear people being told to get their act together,
what we do not understand is that many people do not even have an act. This is
reflected in how many just tag along those who are going somewhere without the
slightest hint about where they going. It is a shame that in this era of
information technology a lot of people are still uniformed where it matters
most. While some are using available instruments of information to improve
themselves and others, others are just interested in talking about what is
going on in the life those who have an act. Funny thing is those who spend
their time analyzing and criticizing anything and everything that goes on
around them actually think they have an act. What people do not realize is that
while you are too busy talking about others, your own journey will be short circuited.
Analyzing people and events is not bad especially if you have good intentions
and you are constructive but when you are tailing everyone with the intent of bringing
them down, it shows you have no act of your own. The best way to prove somebody
wrong is to do what that person has failed to do, stop pulling others down;
outwit them and you will be applauded.

We should be careful whose ideology we align with because if
we are not careful we will become puppets instead of protégés or partners. It is
astonishing the way people join groups just to prove a point; only to discover
that they have made a decision that is not in line with their fundamental
principles. We must make sure that no matter how irritated about an issue we
are, our core values should be our ultimate guide not the spoiler effect. Some of
us will just go with any group just to spite those we do not agree with; in so
doing we forgo our personality and take on that of those who have convinced us
that our ideals are not good enough. What I have discovered is that things like
these happen to only those who have no direction in life. It is sad that most
times, these are the kinds of people we find in leadership in most developing countries
that is why it is easy to pitch them one against the other. The next time you
want to make a move, even if it just a comment you want to make; ask yourself
if you are a puppet or a protégé. Protégés will only align with those who will
help them better their lives by helping them along the lines of their core
values. If you do not know where you are going and why you are going there, it
will be easy to push you in any direction.

There are times when we need to deconstruct in order to move
on to the next level. The strategy and structure you put in place as you start
your journey to make a lasting impact will change as the road gets tougher (it
surely will) and farther. However, we tend to want to hold on to the way we
have been operating and this can become frustrating if care is not taken. As the
vision progresses, we discover that it expands and changes so we might have to
readjust to accommodate these changes if we are to arrive at our destination. We
should not be afraid to deconstruct and reconstruct in order to navigate new
territories. Your readiness to try new things and chance methods is what will
determine how far you can go.

People stop short of reaching their final destination
because they settle at a place of little success. The journey to accomplishing
your dreams is dotted by little stations of success. Some of us are so thrilled
by a certain level of success that we build a little house there while we have
the ability to build an empire if we can just understand that good is an enemy
of best. This is especially common in this part of the world where we have been
made to believe that we are a little less intelligent than the rest of
humanity; immediately we have some form of achievement, we throw in the towel and
celebrate so elaborately that we forget we are not there yet. We must learn to
throw away the ashes of our success so we can light a bigger fire; the worst
thing you can do to your fire is to allow the ashes of the previous fire to
remain in your fireplace. Do yourself a favor, empty your fireplace of the
ashes and begin work on a bigger fireplace; this is the road to expansion and making
a worthwhile impact.