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OVERVIEW

When his wife and soulmate Karen Jordan is involved in a fatal accident, Nathan's entire world crumbles. At the hospital that Karen is sent to, head trauma physician Amanda Wells reveals to Nathan a secret that could simultaneously change the world and destoy it, as well as putting both Amanda's and Nathan's lives in danger.

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The Door

"I think you'll need to see to believe," she said softly as she unlocked the door. "I'm the only person in the entire world who knows of this door's existence, and I suppose you do now, too. There's no turning back from here.”

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The Door

"I think you'll need to see to believe," she said softly as she unlocked the door. "I'm the only person in the entire world who knows of this door's existence, and I suppose you do now, too. There's no turning back from here.”

When his wife and soulmate Karen Jordan is involved in a fatal accident, Nathan's entire world crumbles. At the hospital that Karen is sent to, head trauma physician Amanda Wells reveals to Nathan a secret that could simultaneously change the world and destoy it, as well as putting both Amanda's and Nathan's lives in danger.

I thought it was a very good start, especially how visual it was. I loved the way how it switched from when they first met and how that related to the topic in the present. At first, the transition between the prologue and the first chapter was a little unclear but it soon resolved itself. The pace goes along swiftly but not too fast, and the mystery behind it draws me in. Very good, I would like to hear more.

Thanks for the feedback. When you told me I'd misspelled the word "realise" and some other words I went back and checked straight away. No misspellings. Especially not the word realise, I'm a spelling Nazi and I definitely wouldn't spell the word realise wrong. Unless you mean I should change it to the American "realize", which I don't really think is necessary if I'm being honest "/ Sorry if I got that wrong, haha.

The beginning was catchy because it was extremely descriptive. There were a few misspelled words like "realise". I agree with michelle in removing words you don't need.

In the begining you go into so much detail which makes it easy for me to picture myself standing right next to the character and seeing everything first hand.

In Part one, there is barely no detail at all and the dialogue doesn't reel me in. I read it twice in hopes of becoming a bit more attached to the characters but I didn't feel connected to them. In my opinion, their first meeting read a little dry and rushed. Overall, good.

Very good. Brilliant story, brilliant build up, just brilliant. You had me hooked, all the way throughout the story. A gripping, unique piece of writing which i can imagine being on the bookshelve of my local bookstore and selling MILLIONS of copies, then finally made into a number 1 box office movie. I really hope you go far with this story.

"Nathan's entire world crumbles apart"> you don't need the world apart, crumbles says it for you.

Too many 'changes' in the second sentence, but you knew that. Tighten up the second sentence- too many unnecessary words. Remove every word you don't need. It will make the summary more suspenseful and stronger.

At the hospital, trauma physician Amanda Wells reveals a secret that could simultaneiousy change the world and destroy it ... etc.

"...something about the judges being involved in their own dramatic action scene trying to agree on the winner. Pencils were snapped; notebooks were torn; accusations were hurled; insults exploded, etc..."