Life is too short... How would it make u feel if ur own daughter, or Daughter in law would do that to u?!! If u don't care then that's the end of the story, but if u care, please put their emotions into consideration too.... And I'm sure you guys have ur reasons why don't talk to them, but again Life is too SHORT!!

Life is too short... How would it make u feel if ur own daughter, or Daughter in law would do that to u?!! If u don't care then that's the end of the story, but if u care, please put their emotions into consideration too.... And I'm sure you guys have ur reasons why don't talk to them, but again Life is too SHORT!!

I'm in the same boat. I haven't spoken to my mother in 5 years. Reasons mostly being that she's a terrible, abusive person, and I live a happier life without her in it. I don't care if she knows about my pregnancy though - doesn't change anything.

I'm in the same boat. I haven't spoken to my mother in 5 years. Reasons mostly being that she's a terrible, abusive person, and I live a happier life without her in it. I don't care if she knows about my pregnancy though - doesn't change anything.

Same boat but I don't speak to either of my parents anymore because they have repeatedly chosen to lie and manipulate and use me any time we have contact. It took a long time to get to this point, and after a lot of grieving, I am much happier. This is a situation where they knew that continuing to behave as they did would result in a complete loss of contact, so they are not helpless victims...and saying "work it out" is not possible in this toxic situation. We are waiting until 2nd trimester to tell family that are close to my parents, including my brothers. I wish my parents would neverfindout dh and I are expecting, but it's just not possible.

Same boat but I don't speak to either of my parents anymore because they have repeatedly chosen to lie and manipulate and use me any time we have contact. It took a long time to get to this point, and after a lot of grieving, I am much happier. This is a situation where they knew that continuing to behave as they did would result in a complete loss of contact, so they are not helpless victims...and saying "work it out" is not possible in this toxic situation. We are waiting until 2nd trimester to tell family that are close to my parents, including my brothers. I wish my parents would neverfindout dh and I are expecting, but it's just not possible.

Tell the people you want to tell when you want to tell them. Your mom may find out, but you can keep the boundaries you already have. She's going to find out someday, and in the meantime you don't want to miss out on the relationship with your dad and brothers.

Tell the people you want to tell when you want to tell them. Your mom may find out, but you can keep the boundaries you already have. She's going to find out someday, and in the meantime you don't want to miss out on the relationship with your dad and brothers.

We don't speak to my husband's father. But, no one in the family really does (even his own mother). After he left a message on my husband's VM saying "he was on his list now and he should always look over his shoulder" I was done. He wasn't allowed at the wedding 2 years ago and he won't be a part of our children's lives. When we told the one person still in contact with him we flat out said we didn't care if he was told. Nothing is going to change how awful of a person he is. And he won't be around our children.

We don't speak to my husband's father. But, no one in the family really does (even his own mother). After he left a message on my husband's VM saying "he was on his list now and he should always look over his shoulder" I was done. He wasn't allowed at the wedding 2 years ago and he won't be a part of our children's lives. When we told the one person still in contact with him we flat out said we didn't care if he was told. Nothing is going to change how awful of a person he is. And he won't be around our children.

I understand. My mom knows after a huge fight and argument last weekend (the while family knows now) but I don't plan on speaking to her or allowing her to have a further relationship with my son or one with baby until she seeks professional help. I'll send all updates and things through my little sister who still lives with her and she can share it as she pleases. I just don't want her givin my mom my new number or new address once we move. I say tell the rest of the family and maybe it'll spark your mom to do what she needs to to mend your relationship if that's an option.

I understand. My mom knows after a huge fight and argument last weekend (the while family knows now) but I don't plan on speaking to her or allowing her to have a further relationship with my son or one with baby until she seeks professional help. I'll send all updates and things through my little sister who still lives with her and she can share it as she pleases. I just don't want her givin my mom my new number or new address once we move. I say tell the rest of the family and maybe it'll spark your mom to do what she needs to to mend your relationship if that's an option.

I don't plan to tell my dad, whom I don't talk to. I still talk to my grandmother, aunts, & uncles so I'm sure he'll hear through the grapevine, but he's not going to be part of my children's lives (lost that chance with the first broken promise to DD when she was 2). I feel no need to let him know.

I don't plan to tell my dad, whom I don't talk to. I still talk to my grandmother, aunts, & uncles so I'm sure he'll hear through the grapevine, but he's not going to be part of my children's lives (lost that chance with the first broken promise to DD when she was 2). I feel no need to let him know.

I had my husband tell my mom. We don't speak but it's her only grandchild. The baby won't change anything she's done, but at least it's not on my conscience that we didn't tell her. I need all the good karma possible!

I had my husband tell my mom. We don't speak but it's her only grandchild. The baby won't change anything she's done, but at least it's not on my conscience that we didn't tell her. I need all the good karma possible!

It is amazing how many people have toxic family members. I don't speak to my sister and have been wondering how to handle that. I like this idea -- don't try to keep it a secret from them, but don't tell them directly either.

It is amazing how many people have toxic family members. I don't speak to my sister and have been wondering how to handle that. I like this idea -- don't try to keep it a secret from them, but don't tell them directly either.

I sympathize with your situation. I don't speak to either of my crazy, manipulative parents, but felt obligated to tell them when I was pregnant with my son because I knew they'd find out and would be horribly hurt I hadn't told them. But really...I was much happier when we had no contact. Having them "back in my life" is a constant torment to me.

I sympathize with your situation. I don't speak to either of my crazy, manipulative parents, but felt obligated to tell them when I was pregnant with my son because I knew they'd find out and would be horribly hurt I hadn't told them. But really...I was much happier when we had no contact. Having them "back in my life" is a constant torment to me.

I am glad to know that I am not the only one with major family issues. I don't want my brother to have anything to do with my children anymore but I think out of respect for my parents if he shows up at the hospital I will just deal with it. He still lives with my parents so unless I stop seeing them I have no choice in seeing him. I just ignore him and he leaves my daughter alone for the most part. He will talk to her but I don't see the need to take her uncle away completely he did nothing to her.

I am glad to know that I am not the only one with major family issues. I don't want my brother to have anything to do with my children anymore but I think out of respect for my parents if he shows up at the hospital I will just deal with it. He still lives with my parents so unless I stop seeing them I have no choice in seeing him. I just ignore him and he leaves my daughter alone for the most part. He will talk to her but I don't see the need to take her uncle away completely he did nothing to her.

I wasn't speaking to my mother when I was pregnant with my first. But I told all my siblings and I knew she would hear the news second hand but I wasn't going to short change my siblings becuse of it. She heard all my preggo news second hand from my sibs which was fine with me. I would tell who you want to tell and when you want to tell them. If she hears so be it. Just don't stress about it.

I wasn't speaking to my mother when I was pregnant with my first. But I told all my siblings and I knew she would hear the news second hand but I wasn't going to short change my siblings becuse of it. She heard all my preggo news second hand from my sibs which was fine with me. I would tell who you want to tell and when you want to tell them. If she hears so be it. Just don't stress about it.

We don't speak to my husbands dad or step mom. We won't tell them about this pregnancy but I'm sure my sister in law will. They won't care anyway. In our last falling out, we were very clear that they could still see our son and have a relationship with him. We haven't heard a peep from them. I guess they don't care that much about their grandchild. They're a__holes.

We don't speak to my husbands dad or step mom. We won't tell them about this pregnancy but I'm sure my sister in law will. They won't care anyway. In our last falling out, we were very clear that they could still see our son and have a relationship with him. We haven't heard a peep from them. I guess they don't care that much about their grandchild. They're a__holes.

If it were me, I'd tell my father and siblings and enjoy that with them. I'd cordially notify my mother, particularly indicating that you acknowledge your relationship is not such that she can be involved much, if at all, but that you'd like to both be mature enough to allow for your child to have a decent relationship with its grandfather and aunts/uncles. Agree on the right this child has to know the family you love. Perhaps even lay some ground rules if you need about how she and you may interact, again, if at all. I'd do it via email at first, then maybe follow up with a phone call or let her call you. But, in writing, you'll get to cover all the bases you see fit and choose your words very carefully prior to what could turn into a heated conversation. Good luck!!

If it were me, I'd tell my father and siblings and enjoy that with them. I'd cordially notify my mother, particularly indicating that you acknowledge your relationship is not such that she can be involved much, if at all, but that you'd like to both be mature enough to allow for your child to have a decent relationship with its grandfather and aunts/uncles. Agree on the right this child has to know the family you love. Perhaps even lay some ground rules if you need about how she and you may interact, again, if at all. I'd do it via email at first, then maybe follow up with a phone call or let her call you. But, in writing, you'll get to cover all the bases you see fit and choose your words very carefully prior to what could turn into a heated conversation. Good luck!!

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