Moving On

Saturday, October 12, 2013

This has been a hard week. Many issues came to light and some old ones were highlighted. I felt alone and adrift without my wonderful husband who was away on a business trip. Even though he was across the pond and dealing with work and a 6 hour time difference, he did call and we kept in touch. It just wasn't the same.

He is home now and trying to get me away from all the madness that is my life.
Right now he is out in the kitchen making dinner because I asked him too. He's that good!

I always thought I was a strong person but this past week really tested my resolve. I have started the process of looking at nursing homes for my mother. Today I didn't feel like doing anything but did get out and do some errands and finished putting up my Halloween village. I've been working on it since last weekend. Hubby wanted to go for a walk in the drizzle, and even though I really didn't want to, I went. Got in some steps and had quality time with him. I'm moving on.

SIMPLELIFE4REAL
I think when a parent (or any loved one) has dementia, it's like 1,000's of little deaths as more and more is taken away. Some days/weeks are extremely hard when things happen along the way. I am so sorry your are having to go through this. I also think that dementia is one of the toughest (if not THE toughest) diseases on the caregivers. When I was going though it with my dad, I was really struck by the fact that millions of caregivers are having to cope with this without any real form of assistance in many, many cases.

The team for dementia caregivers helped me a lot during that time. I would post frequently there. It seems like that team is much quieter now, but it still can be a place for great support.

I hope you are able to get the living situation resolved pretty quickly for your mom. It will be hard to make the transistion, but after that, it will be better.

As your mom fallen any yet? I say "yet" because it's something that will happen with pretty much everyone with dementia whether they are at home or in a nursing home. It's extremely difficult to prevent 100% of falls without literally tying a person with dementia down. If your mom has her first fall after she's in a nursing home, don't automatically think they weren't taking good care of her. It's a balancing act between keeping a person with dementia safe and keeping them reasonably comfortable and happy. I just wanted to "put that out there" because people can get so upset when someone falls in a nursing home. As you know, we cared for my dad at home up to his death. We had people with him 24/7 the last few months of his life and he STILL fell (I think about four times total). Fortunately, none of the falls were serious, but they did happen.

I'm glad your husband is back to help care for you as you care for your mom.