As Good as Live Aid (85)

Saturday, November 24

The Leafs flew all the way to Dallas, I guess to play a hockey game. Apparently they watched football the day before, having a luxury box all to themselves to watch the Cowboys. I spent a couple of minutes watching football at Moose's house on Thanksgiving. One of Moose's relatives wanted to see the score in a game between the University of Bigotry, who were battling it out with the University of Steroids. Oh Jesus Christ is football the worst shit in the world to watch!? No, wait. I'm taking the question mark off that last statement. I'm not leaving it open for debate. Football is the worst shit in the world to watch.

Now normally hanging around with Moose makes clocks run backwards, but this... To his credit, Moose was very polite in accommodating this relation by marriage, twice removed, put back, and now here to eat my turkey. We were watching the Oil game at the time, and Moose twice switched away from an Oiler man advantage to check the score for this guy. Maybe that's emblematic of how badly the Oil are playing, that watching a bunch of fatso's line-up for a grueling 2 seconds of action followed by 10 minutes of video review is more engrossing than watching Geoff Sanderson on your powerplay.

Anyway, Moose deserves a lot of props for once again having me be the center of attention at one of his dinner parties. It takes a big man to have that little thunder.Oh, and after dinner we were joined by the one and only Washingtron! It was good to see Wash, a guy I'm sure most of you would like. You may not want to start a hockey blog with him, but I'm pretty sure you'd like him.Wash hasn't posted here since November the 4th. Here are the two reasons, in descending order, why since that time he couldn't be bothered to write 25% of He Score, He Shoot!:

1) His girlfriend was visiting. Shocking at first, I know. We all went through it as well. Some woman wants to be with him. It's made all the weirder when you see how amazing his girlfriend is. Well, you know what they say: The hotter they are, the crazier they are.

2) He just bought "Rock Band" for the xbox 360. Perhaps the number 1 reason for Wash's shocking lack of motor skills is his absolute devotion to sitting in front of a TV trying to kill Orks and Goblins. Seriously readers, does he really have to again write typically preposterous Wash statements like he is always right! I mean, who else around here is going to learn the drum part to "Learn to Fly" by the Foo Fighters?! Is it YOU?! I don't think you've got the guts!

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Oh, right. Last nights Leafs game. I wouldn't really call it a game, so much as a UFA highlight reel for Boyd Deveraeux. A great first period with Mats looking true-to-form fantastic, but then, fuck me. It's like the worst that could have happened was going into the first intermission not having scored on that 5-3.The Leafs came back out and just looked timid. The Wozniewski to Kaberle "You Take the Grenade!" thing was just mind blowing. Is that just a case of young players are going to make mistakes, or is there something deeper? I almost don't want that answered. Devereaux was awesome, finally seeing some truck punching hits from Bell. McCabe saved at least a goal which made up for a couple of what the fuck moments.

Tonight, it's a must win against Phoenix. A must because the Leafs haven't really won in a while, it's against the Coyotes, who you have to be able to beat. Also, it's an away game. A win which they have to pluck because being at home wins are a very bare cupboard.