John Boehner and Eric Cantor Abducted by Aliens

(Washington D.C.) Unconfirmed Sources are reporting that House GOP leaders Eric Cantor and John Boehner have been abducted by aliens and replaced by evil robots intent on destroying America. D.C. police have taken the two evil robots into custody and are at this moment trying to determine the whereabouts of the two lawmakers.

“I knew something was terribly wrong when the two evil robots convinced their fellow GOP House members to reject the payroll tax cut extension this morning.” says Washington watcher Matt Miller. “The rejection of this temporary extension seems like a calculated move to disrupt the economy and hurt America. I’m glad to learn that this irresponsible act was perpetrated by evil robots and not two lawmakers whose ostensible job is to pass laws for the benefit of the people.”

At this hour there is still no sign of the real Eric Cantor and John Boehner. The President has said that he will activate the US Air Force as well as all law enforcement assents to track down the UFO that seems to have taken the two GOP leaders.

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.