Contents

The Movie

Synopsis

"Please — consider my legs when cleaning your pipe!"

A meteor makes its way to Earth, where it lands in the back pasture of a family of hillbillies. A giant spider emerges and starts laying rock-like eggs all over the place from which hatch a bunch of creepy tarantulas. It's up to a NASA scientist and an astrophysicist to figure out a way to destroy the monster before it and its children manage to ravage the whole countryside. There's hillbillies, bumpkin sheriffs, a teenage reporter, and a whole town full of drunken lumberjacks facing off against The Giant Spider Invasion. Who will win the final battle?

Information

Alan Hale Jr. greets Davey (Kevin Brodie) in the opening scene with the line, "Hi, little buddy!" This is a reference to his role as The Skipper on "Gilligan's Island".

The budget for the film was around $250,000.

Dan and Ev have a conversation which includes the exchange: Ev: "I'm sorry I missed the sermon. What was it about?" Dan: "Sin." Ev: "What did the minister say about it?" Dan: "He was against it." That referred to a famous (or infamous) conversation former President Calvin Coolidge - nicknamed "Silent Cal" - and his wife once had.

There was supposed to be a dramatic shot of the giant spider crushing the house by having the spider dropped from a crane onto it while a bulldozer chained to the back of the house would pull away. However, when the shot was filmed, the spider's legs all went straight up into the air. The crew inside working its arms were nearly killed when broken wood from the destroyed house came up through the spider and came close to impaling them.

There was supposed to be a shot of a big spider in a tree bursting into flames. To achieve this, the director covered a large prop spider with gunpowder and had two crew members sitting above it in the tree who would drop a match on the spider. The director got the camera up to a very fast fps to achieve a slow motion look, and had them drop the first match. Nothing happened, so they dropped a second. Still nothing happened, so they lit the entire book of matches and dropped it on the spider. With nothing happening, the director turned off the camera - and immediately afterwards a huge explosion and fireball shot up, burning the hair off of the crew members and starting several small brush fires. The director was furious that he wasn't able to get the shot on film.

Alan Hale Jr. in The Giant Spider Invasion

In a scene depicting the "giant spiders" attacking a little league baseball game, the "spiders" are obviously Volkswagen Beetles with puppet legs attached. Tread marks from the VW's tires can actually be seen in several camera angles.

This film is listed among the 100 Most Enjoyably Bad Movies Ever Made in Golden Raspberry Award founder John Wilson's book THE OFFICIAL RAZZIE® MOVIE GUIDE.

In an interview director Bill Rebane said that shooting on the film began before the script was even complete. Rebane added that the script was revised numerous times throughout the shoot.

According to Bill Rebane the two writers on the film each approached the story from different directions. Richard L. Huff wrote the original story and kept a very serious tone to the first draft of the script. Robert Easton on the other hand lent the film a comical tone, writing most of the colorful dialog for his character and the other locals. The films rather infamous jokes are credited to him as well. Combining both writers material resulted in an odd-ball tone for the script.

Bill Rebane said that the hot summer temperatures were quite tough on the cast and crew. At times the temperature on location would be 100 degrees and on the sets it would reach 120 degree at times, thanks to the studio lighting.

Director Bill Rebane once dubbed the film "The Giant Spider Disaster" in an interview, referring to how problematic the production was.

Nearly all of the night scenes were shot day-for-night. The scenes were darkened in post production, and although some of the footage was darkened too much to be clearly seen, it was still used in the film.

In May 2005 there was a Bill Rebane film festival at the Orpheum Theatre in Madison, Wisconsin that featured this film. Hosting the festival were Michael J. Nelson and Kevin Murphy. Nelson and Murphy said despite their lampooning of the film on MST3K they actually admired Rebane because he was able to make the film with such a low budget.

David Hoff, who provides the radio voice of the helicopter pilot, was an actual pilot for the Wisconsin Air Guard.

"Packers won the super bowl!"

Stars Steve Brodie and Barbara Hale pulled in family members to play supporting roles in the film. Brodie's son Kevin Brodie played Dave Perkins and Hale's husband Bill Williams came in to play the role of Dutch.

It took nine people to work the fake spider legs on the Volkswagen Beetle that was used for the giant spider. The people would have to huddle together on boards nailed to the inside of the stripped vehicle.

Since the driver of the infamous spider-car obviously couldn't see where the vehicle was going extras would often have to push the vehicle to guide it, while at the same time having to pretend they were fleeing from the 'giant spider'.

Originally the spiders in the film were supposed to be only about 10 feet in length but the producers insisted that if the film were going to compete with Jaws (1975), which was released around the same time, the size of the spiders would have to be increased to pose more threat.

In November 2010, the frame from the VW/giant spider hybrid was prominently displayed in Gleason, Wisconsin right next the the U.S. Post Office (pictures below). Since then the frame has disappeared, its whereabouts are currently unknown.

The Episode

Host Segments

Prologue: - Tom Servo's got spirit and wants to be a cheerleader. Wanting an 'S', Mike and Crow are hesitant to give him any letters at all, but eventually assent to give him a M, an R, a small x, and one L. Servo's got MRxL

Segment One: - Pearl and her goons tell stories about the fun they had camping and mock Mike and the bots' inability to camp. Because they're trapped on a satellite. Pearl proceeds to show some "wild flowers" they found, which prove later to be mind controlling aliens. Servo explains "portage", whilst managing to smack Mike and Crow with the canoe on his head, Three Stooges-style. Pearl and Brain Guy become controlled by the pods, and offer Mike & the bots some of them. Mike becomes suspicious, meanwhile Pearl sends him the movie.

The SOL crew tries to stay awake

Segment Two: - Gypsy becomes controlled by one of the pods. She tries to convince M&TBs to sleep, but her lullaby about evil super-consciousnesses devouring them makes Mike wonder if something might be up with her.

Segment Three: - Mike and Tom struggle to stay awake so they don't have their minds taken over while Crow decides to consume a large quantity of sugar and caffeine. Mike calls Bobo, and discovers that he has not been taken over. Mike convinces Bobo of the pod's plan eventually, but it's too late as the mind controlled Observer and Pearl tie him up. Before Movie Sign, Crow's heart starts beating rapidly from the excessive overwhelming amounts of sugar and caffeine with a disturbing heart-beat thumping noise and cries out "SUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRGE!" just as Mike and the bots rush into the theater.

Segment Four: - Mike and Crow attempt to determine the original Tom from the alien clone. The clone is successfully scared away when Tom proves himself by rattling off his underwear collection.

Which one's the real Tom?

Segment Five: - The original Tom disappeared and Crow ends up affected, Mike calls Bobo again and convinces him he can save the day. Bobo escapes and kills the mother pod, destroying the clones and rendering everyone affected back to normal in the process. Pearl, realizing she missed Mike and the Bots watching the movie, forces them to watch the movie again. (You can hear Mike and the bots exclaim "MOVIE SIGN, AGAIN!" upsettingly just as the closing credits started rolling.)

Stinger: "Pfffft!" (Jeweler guy makes a raspberry with his tongue).

Trivia

The host segments in this episode notably parody Invasion of the Body Snatchers (both the 1956 and 1978 film versions. The pods are from the original, while the clones screaming at non-clones is from the 70's one.).

Because Pearl missed Mike and the Bots watching the movie, she subjects it to them again at the end of the episode. This is technically the only episode where they had to sit through the same movie twice in a row.

When amped-up Crow is in the theater, a heart beating sound effect continues for several minutes.

Mike does a call back to Revenge of the Creature, telling Bobo, "You are a great mountain gorilla! You are Bobo, son of Koko!"

Quotes & References

Side view of the frame for the VW/giant spider hybrid, photographed in Gleason, WI in late 2010.

"It's a Giant Spider Invasion of savings at Menards!"

Menards is a chain of home improvement stores in the upper Midwest, headquartered in Mike Nelson's home state of Wisconsin. There is a Menards store located in Eden Prairie where MST3K was produced.

"Steve Brodie closes his eyes again."

Reference to the first line of the Gary Wright song, "Dream Weaver".

"Hey, little buddy."

Even before Gilligan's Island, Alan Hale had used the phrase "little buddy", which is why it was incorporated into the show. Of course, by the time this film was made, it was exclusively associated with Gilligan's Island.

"Love, soft as an easy chair."

First line from "Evergreen" by Barbara Streisand from the film A Star is Born.

Referring to serial killer Ed Gein's house in Plainfield, Wisconsin which contained furniture and other artifacts made out of human remains. The original house burned down (causes unknown) before it could be auctioned off. The remains of the house were bulldozed and the property became overgrown. Gein spent the rest of his life in state mental institutions, dying at the Mendota Mental Health Institute on July 26, 1984. He also robbed recently buried graves and wore masks made from the skin of his victims faces, which later became the inspiration for both the film PsychoandThe Texas Chain Saw Massacre

Mike is parodying a song sung by Willie Tyler , a ventriloquist and comedian popular in the 1970s. During his act, he and his dummy, Lester, sang this song with the line "I love little baby ducks / old pick up trucks / slow moving trains / and rain." Crow refers to Willie Tyler and Lester in episode 816, Prince of Space, upon seeing Mike as a small, robot puppet.

"Laserium, with music by Pink Floyd."

A reference to the laser light show, Laserium, founded by filmmaker Ivan Dryer in the 1970s.

"Hooterville was decimated by Scud missiles that day."

Hooterville was the fictional town in which the TV shows Green Acres and Petticoat Junction were set. Scud missiles were a type of ballistic missiles developed by the Soviet Union, most famous for being used by the Iraqi army during the Persian Gulf War.

A reference to a renowned long tracking shot in the movie Goodfellas, in which Henry Hill, on a date with his future wife Karen, bypasses the line waiting to get into the Copacabana nightclub by going in through the kitchen.

Mumia Abu-Jamal, a journalist and the former Information Minister of the Black Panthers during the period when the mayor of Philadelphia was Frank Rizzo (who was widely considered to be an unapologetic racist). Abu-Jamal has been in prison since the early 1980s for the alleged murder of a Philadelphia police officer, though it is argued that he never received a fair trial. He continues to be the subject of an activist movement to seek his freedom, or a re-trial. Bobby Seale, the Black Panthers' co-founder, was tried and acquitted on charges of murdering a fellow Panther in 1970.

"SUUUUURGE!"

Front view of the frame for the VW/giant spider hybrid, photographed at around the same time.

The advertising slogan for Surge, a heavily caffeinated citrus flavored soft drink marketed by the Coca-Cola Company during the late 1990s which made a return in fall of 2015 at convenience stores in the eastern and midwestern United States.

"They’re toughening GED standards! No fair! -- Boo!"

GED stands for General Educational Development, the standardized test for people who never graduated from high school; passing the GED is equivalent to earning a high school diploma. In 1997 tougher standards went into effect: whereas before a student needed at least a score of 40 on each of the five sections or an average of 45 across all five tests, now they needed both a minimum score of 40 and an average score of 45.

"Fur is murder!"

"Fur is murder" is a popular slogan among anti-fur animal-rights activists, who denounce the use of animals for making fur coats as cruel and unnecessary, given the ready availability of non-animal-based outerwear.

"Violence erupted when Dave Dudley canceled his appearance in Gleason."

Dave Dudley is a Minneapolis musician known for his trucker-themed songs featured on such albums as 'Six Days on the Road' and 'Christmas Truck Stop.'

Hamm's Brewery was a beer brewer with headquarters in St. Paul, Minnesota. Its slogan was "From the land of sky-blue waters"[1], and many of its advertising signs featured a moving waterfall. The company was acquired by Heublein, Inc in 1968 who then sold it to Olympia Brewing Company. The St. Paul's area brewery was eventually closed. After a series of acquisitions and mergers the Hamm's brand is now owned by MillerCoors, who produces Hamm's Premium, Golden Draft, and Special Light

"Dutch! Oh, Dutch." "Too many Jell-O shots."

Jell-O is a sweetened gelatin (made from collagen derived from skin, boiled crushed horn, hoof and bones, connective tissues and intestines of domesticated animals) dessert made by General Foods Corporation. Jell-O shots are Jell-O made with booze instead of with water and then cut into little squares for consumption by college students (though the practice supposedly began on military bases where liquid alcohol is not allowed).

New York University’s Film School has been teaching film for more than thirty years and is considered one of the country’s finest film schools.

"My emergency shipment of Lucky Strikes."

Lucky Strike cigarettes were one of the most popular brands in America during the first half of the twentieth century, and the first brand to be marketed directly to women. Thanks to an ad campaign in the 1920s that urged women worried about their weight to reach for a Lucky instead of a sweet, the number of teenage girls who smoked tripled in a decade.

"I understand you can repair these giant spiders yourself."

One reason that VW Beetles were so popular is that they were relatively easy to repair on the rare occasions when they broke down.

Elvis Presley (1935-1977), the King of Rock and Roll, was one of the most popular musicians from the 1950s until his death in the late 1970s. He was a teen idol in the late 1950s, helped usher in the era of rock and roll, became a movie star, created an enormous and opulent home at Graceland in Memphis, developed problems with drug abuse, and finally died of a heart attack at the age of 42. Since his death, many people have earned a living by donning a sequined jumpsuit and pretending to be the King. There are more than 30 professional Elvis impersonators in Las Vegas alone.

"If you see only ten thousand movies this year, make sure this isn’t one of them."

'If you see only one movie this year, make it this one' is a critic’s quote that has been used for many movies, to the extent that it is now considered trite.

The Maginot Line was a giant defensive barrier between France and Germany. It was built by France in the 1930s as a way to defend against another German attack like the one in World War I. Unfortunately for France, when Nazi Germany, under the leadership of Adolf Hitler, finally decided to invade in 1940, they did so by way of Belgium, where the French border was essentially undefended.

"These spiders have lousy heaters, though."

The heater in the VW Beetle (see above note) was notoriously terrible. Because the engines were air-cooled, it was difficult to channel excess engine heat into the passenger cabin.

"Jog-walk out of danger!"

Jog-walking is an exercise program in which the runner alternates jogging with walking, ultimately working up to five minutes jogging, one minute running. Marathoners sometimes use this approach because it is less likely to lead to cramps and muscle fatigue.

"Might as well get my Pall Malls while I’m here."

Pall Malls were one of the first 'premium' brands of cigarettes, debuting early in the 20th century. Between 1960 and 1966 they were the top-selling brand in the country.

"Hey, spider, you have a ball hitch? Mine’s busted."

A ball hitch is a type of hitch for automobiles that is commonly used for towing boat trailers and attaching bike racks.

"Remember: I mate, then I kill."

The female black widow spider notoriously devours the male after mating is completed, although there is some evidence to suggest that the spider’s lethal reputation has been somewhat exaggerated.

"The first extremely tentative atomic test at Alamogordo."

Alamogordo is a town in New Mexico. On July 16, 1945, 60 miles from the air base at Alamogordo, the first atomic bomb was exploded. The following month, the United States dropped two atomic bombs on Japan, ending World War II.

"I am death, destroyer of lawns."

J. Robert Oppenheimer (1904-1967), head of the top secret Manhattan Project, has written that when he witnessed the detonation of the first atomic bomb at Alamogordo in 1945 (see previous note), a line from the sacred Hindu text Bhagavad-Gita came into his mind: I am death, destroyer of worlds.

"The spider needs a Zantac."

Zantac is an acid reducer used to relieve the symptoms of heartburn. It is available in both prescription and nonprescription forms.

"Alan Hale digests a kielbasa."

​Kielbasa, also known as Polish sausage, is a type of sausage frequently flavored with garlic and smoked. It is made from either pork or a mixture of beef and pork.

The Green Bay Packers are an NFL team based out of Green Bay, Wisconsin. The Packers won Super Bowl XXXI on Jan. 26, 1997 - a mere four months prior to the initial airing of this episode. The repeated cheers for the Packers from the SOL crew also led to considerable interest in this film in online communities when the Packers went up against and beat the Pittsburgh Steelers in Super Bowl XLV in 2011.

"This can't be Wisconsin! There's no billboards for Tommy Barlett's water show!"

This is an anachronism, as Hirsch, an NFL running back from the mid-1940 until the late 1950s, did not pass away until January 28, 2004. Incidentally, this occurred three days before the last episode of MST3K (already in reruns since the original run ended in 1999) aired on SciFi.

Memorable Quotes

[First lines of the movie]

Man: Sheriff!

Sheriff [Played by Alan Hale, Jr.]: Hey, little buddy!

[Mike and the 'bots cheer]

[Dan walks out of his "lady friend" Olga's house before she stops him.]

Olga: Wait, you forgot your back brace.

[Mike and the 'bots all react with utter revulsion as Kester drops his pants, exposing red long underwear.]

Mike: Ugh, he's pink!

Servo: I don't know how, but I think I just became sterile!

Crow: [cheering] Go spiders! Go spiders! Go go spiders!

[Ev and Dan struggle in the wind from a meteorite strike on their land.]

Servo [as Dan]: Why, I hope that bomb didn't land on our pile of tires and our busted refrigerator in the yard, and the rusted chassis of our '68 Impala!

. . .

Dan: What the [expletive deleted] hell was that?

Mike [as Dan]: Why, it's befuddlin' mah dumb cracker mind!

Servo, Mike, or Crow[As various people in the mob]: Packers!

[After seeing Dan's car, with its Ford lettering facing the camera.]

Crow: Like a Rock! [N]

[The scene opens in Ev and Dan's pitch-black kitchen at night.]

Servo: Actually filmed inside the thumbhole of a bowling ball.

. . .

[Later in that scene, Dan begins chasing sister-in-law Terri around the kitchen table after threatening to spank her.]

Mike: And the movie ramps up the revulsion!

Crow: This movie hates us, doesn't it?

[Dan is trying to find out if the stones he found are diamonds]

Ev: Diamonds are supposed to cut glass.

Crow: Yeah, they're supposed to, but they're too damn lazy!

Dan: [walks toward window]

Servo: Too bad all their windows are made of plastic wrap and duct tape!

[Dan scratches a crude "$" into the window]

Crow [as Dan]: ...Aryan...Nation...rules...

Dan: [excited] Will you look at that!?

Mike [as Dan]: [excited] I made a [sic] "R"!

[A visibly shaken Dan stumbles back into the kitchen after discovering a mutilated corpse in the backyard.]

Ev: You look like you could use a drink.

Servo [as Ev]: And a shower, and a job.

Dan: I found another body...

Mike [as Ev]: Well, good, 'cause yours is gettin' kinda gross.

[As yet another unappealing rural Wisconsinite is harrassed by a giant spider.]

Mike: I'm starting to wish that the South would rise again and crush the North.

[Ev opens a dresser drawer and an assortment of puppet spiders pop their legs out of the drawer.]

Mike [as Spiders]: We're your dirty socks! Wash us!

Crow: Giant Puppet Invasion!

[Drs. Vance and Langer climb a hill, only to discover the giant spider, its spindly, furry legs akimbo.]

Servo [as Spider]: Please — consider my legs when cleaning your pipe!

[A restless mob begins to form with the intent of taking out the giant spider.]

Gypsy: A place where you would meet a horrible demise before laying your polluting fingers upon them.

Servo: So you put them in Mike's laundry basket?

[A scene is too dark]

Crow: "Dark? It's not dark," Rebane declared.

Servo: Visuals? For a movie? Who needs them?

[Dan Kester goes to the refrigerator]

Crow [as Dan]: Want a piece of milk?

Dan Kester: I found another body.

Mike: Well good, yours was getting pretty gross.

Sheriff: [on the phone] No, ma'am, I don't have the number.

Servo: Take your time, movie.

Sheriff: All I can tell you is, use the Yellow Pages. Let your fingers do the walking!

[the sheriff laughs]

Crow: Not a joke, but an incredible simulation.

Sheriff: That's funny, I wonder why she hung up on me?

Mike: Maybe your bodily funk travels over the phone lines...

Dan Kester: A man can't get any peace in his own house...

Mike: Well Section 8 owns the house...

Crow: A showered person, thank God...

Dan Kester: Lay off the booze, Ev and they're go away!

Mike: Ya know, in her defense, laying off the booze would mean seeing him sober...

Mike: Bobo, Is that you? I mean, really you?

Bobo: No, it's John Schuck on a bad hair day. Of course it's me, and I'm fine but these two, hoo-hoo-hoo, they really love their zucchinis. In fact they're packin' 'em up so they can deliver zucchinis to their friends all over the galaxy.

Mike: Now, now, now listen very carefully, Bobo. These pods grow aliens who replace your body. If they're loading them into the truck that means the whole galaxy could be in danger.

Bobo: Oh come now, ha. Just because they load a bunch of zucchini throw pillows onto a truck doesn't mean they're trying to take over the galaxy. Haha. Proposterous, typical of you with your back and your Braun hand blenders. Haha. Oh look, I'll just ask her. Oh say, Lawgiver, now are those evil pods? And are you trying to take over the galaxy?

Pearl Forrester: Yes, and yes. Excuse me, please.

Bobo: Well, I guess I can see how you could misconstrue that, Nelson, but I'm still not convinced.

[Bobo tries to take one of the pods but Pearl screeches in an alien like voice]

Bobo: Nelson, I see your point. You may be onto something. The Universe is in danger but don't you worry, no-siree Bob, I'm on the job. I'll stop these two wretched creatures and foil their little plan. I'll mmm-hmm-hmm-mmm.

Mike: Well, again we're doomed.

Crow: [fake-laughing] It's always funny when you turn down tea, then you decide you want tea!

[watching Dan Kester]

Mike: Johnny Crappleseed.

Crow: Paul Infected Bunyan.

Servo: Old McDonald had a cyst.

[watching the giant spider dissolve into a gloppy mess]

Mike: Ew, the spider needs a Zantac.

Servo: Alan Hale digests a kielbasa.

Crow: "It Came from Planet Gross-Out."

[An asteroid shaped like a sperm approaches Earth]

Crow: I hope Earth has its diaphragm on.

[first lines]

Mike: Hi, everyone. Mike Nelson here. Welcome to the Satellite...

Servo: [dressed as a cheerleader] Are you ready for some spee-rit!

Servo: If you only see 10,000 movies this year, make sure this isn't one of them.

[last lines]

Pearl Forrester: You mean they watched the movie, and I didn't get to watch them watching the movie? Bobo, get rid of my body. Brain guy, send them the movie - again.