“Team up with a ventriloquist doll and stage your own talk show with these famous funnymen!” I’ll pass, thanks. I realize this catalog came out before we were all scarred for life by that goddamn clown scene in Poltergeist (1982), but still, what boy is going to ask for a Mortimer Snerd dummy when he can get a Slave I or Snow Speeder for the same price, or the Dagobah Action Playset and a Tauntaun? If there’s one thing we learned in the ’80s, it’s that all dolls are alive and will turn on you, usually with knives. Action figures are also alive, of course, but if you scatter them under the sheets and prop them up on the nightstand, they will protect you while you sleep.