Simpsons Nostalgia

Freemasonry

The Stonecutters, the secret organization Homer joins in "Homer the Great," is of course a parody of Freemasonry. The Simpsons' parody of the Freemasons focused on the vague conspiracy theory that the group possesses some sort of corrupting influence over political, economic and even cultural matters of the world, as is expressed in the Stonecutters theme:

Who controls the British crown? Who keeps the metric system down? We do, we do!Who keeps Atlantis off the maps? Who keeps the Martians under wraps? We do, we do!Who holds back the electric car? Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star? We do, we do!Who robs cavefish of their sight? Who rigs every Oscar night? We do, we do, we do!

As a side note, I was definitely also introduced to Steve Guttenberg, of Police Academy and Cocoon fame (and come to think of that, probably the concept of an electric car), through this song.

The Simpsons also references this conspiracy theory about the Freemasons in the episode "$pringfield (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling)" (whose title is a reference to the film Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb -- so many references!) when Mr. Burns is losing his mind Howard Hughes-style and thinks he hears the bacteria on Smithers' face yelling in unison "Freemasons run the country!"

I have to admit, this reference had me a little confused back then, and for a while I thought maybe "Freemasons" were also the name for some type of microbe…

The Simpsons writers were also quite fond of making fun of Shriners (who fall under the umbrella of freemasonry). There are references to Grandpa Simpson being a shriner and those little fezzes and cars show up in all sort of different places on the show.

I can't say for sure whether the real Freemasons have a secret parchment, hazing rituals or a "Stone of Shame" (or a "Stone of Triumph" -- which is larger than the "Stone of Shame"), but I do know that I knew way too much about them before I ever even encountered a real-life relic of the Freemasons in the form of the Masonic Temple in the city I grew up in.