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Nine Inch Nails

Frank is the resident Sausagefest Man of Mystery. We don’t really know anything about Frank. We do know he likes to rock. He also likes movies and TV series. Here are his favourites from 2018. Now you know as much about Frank as we do! ***

This set, supposedly limited to just 1000 pieces, retailed for about $200 in the mid-90’s. It included five CDs:

Fixed (EP)

March of the Pigs parts I and II

Closer to God parts I and II

Those singles are available on their own, for much less. The box also included an unauthorized T-shirt that said “FIST” on the front, and “F%@#” on the back. No Nine Inch Nails logos anywhere to be found on that. It came in a cheap black plastic box with the Nine Inch Nails “n” logo and the word “Fisted” on top…except it’s not really the Nine Inch Nails “n” logo. The official one is backwards. This is just a normal “n”. They were hoping you wouldn’t notice that. This package was assembled by Phantom Imports, who must have been laughing their asses off at the ridiculous amount of markup.

This is a great example of a collectible that is not. The artist labels had no involvement and certainly did not set the pricing. The shirt and box have no logos on them. Anybody can go and print a T-shirt that says “FIST” and “FUCK” on it. All this for $200. Even if you were missing those five singles (which any real Nails fan was not) there is no reason to buy this.

We had an incomplete copy of this come into one of our stores, but it was missing the shirt and the other goodies. Looking to make a few extra bucks, we stuffed the box full of other albums and singles and jacked the price up. That was a decision made by a franchise owner. I don’t think he had an easy time selling this box, which was really just a plastic box with a random selection of CDs in it by the time we put it up for sale. A rip off box set made even more so.

I’ve seen others just as irritating as this. One was a “deluxe” version of Pink Floyd’s The Wall. This was the 2 CD set, packed into a wooden carving of a wall. It looked cool, but it also looked like something a skilled woodworker could make in his or her shop at home. It was painted white with the Wall logo scrawled across it. Around $200 for that too, somewhere at a store in Hamilton ironically called Cheapies.

Probably made by the same company was a commemorative Beatles single for “Real Love”. It came in a red box with a heart on it, with a button “Real Love” inside that looked like a cross between a heart and an apple. We ordered this one in, new, and our cost was about $40. It sat and sat and sat there for months. It wasn’t authorized any more than the Nine Inch Nails box was. We didn’t realize we’d brought in a lemon until it was too late. We had to be told by a customer who was a Beatles collector. “These things aren’t worth anything,” he said. “They’re not issued by the Beatles. It’s a made-up collectible.” We should have known, but it’s hard when you’re ordering this shit from a distributor’s catalogue.

Have you ever run across a rip off like these in your travels? Or worse, have you ever bought one?

Like this:

This is, by far, the most painful loss that Star Trek fans have had to endure yet. Even more so than the great Gene Roddenberry, Leonard Nimoy embodied Star Trek. He was Spock — he became that character. After Star Trek, he struggled against it. His first autobiography was entitled I Am Not Spock. A couple decades later, he recanted and released a new book called I Am Spock. It took him a while to come to peace with the fact that he will always be remembered as Mr. Spock, but he did and the fans loved him for it.

Apologies in advance to my lovely wife. She really is awesome for letting me do this.

RECORD STORE TALES Part 314: The Musical Crimes of Mrs. LeBrain

As we wind down the Record Store Tales, we get to the point that I met Jen in September 2005. The funny thing about love is the rose-coloured glasses. I don’t remember Jen having such bad taste in music. However, the photographic proof is here. She recently dug up her old Linkin Park CD wallet (!!!) , inside which are many dirty and scratched CDs. Yes, Jen never took proper care of her discs either before we met, it’s true. I can’t even identify some of the filth on her Marilyn Manson CD. Could be coffee.

So here I am, a single Record Store Guy in the fall of ’05, meeting the love of his life…and these are the CDs in her collection. Thankfully we shared a love of bands such as The Beatles and The Darkness too. Even more thankfully, Jen doesn’t listen to Limp Bizkit anymore. (I mean seriously, look at these! She even owns the Limp Bizkit CD without Wes Borland!)

I remember seeing this in my local HMV store in 1992. I thought, “Nine Inch Nails have cool packaging,” because you didn’t see too many digipacks back then. It’s cooler than just that though, with three panels unfolding in a “T” shape each with a letter on it. “n”…”i”…”n”…

Gotta give Trent Reznor credit for packaging, he usually has very striking and original concepts for his discs. Also cool how the packaging for broken nicely complements the remix album fixed once both are bought. broken technically qualifies as an EP I guess, or a mini-album maybe, even though it is longer than most classic Van Halen albums.

There is a version of broken out there that was once considered one of the Holy Grails of Nine Inch Nails collectibles. I guess the advent of eBay made it much easier to get, because eBay has one as of this writing for $12, free shipping, VG condition. It is a 2 CD version, with the two “hidden” tracks on a separate 3″ CD enclosed within the digipack. This was supposedly discontinued because unscrupulous store owners were taking out the bonus CD and selling it separately. Or so goes the legend. I think cost would also have been a factor in discontinuing the bonus CD. On re-releases like I own, the bonus tracks are included as #98 and #99, with 91 tracks of 1 second silences preceding them.

“Pinion” serves as a brief intro to “Wish” and they are always presented together. This serves to intensify the mighty “Wish”, the heaviest song released by Nine Inch Nails up to the time. What sounds like a blowtorch punctuates a frantic drum rhythm. This progresses into a mélange of bizarre sounds, shredding guitars and a sledgehammer riff. “Last” follows, a slower more relentless riff. At times its the industrial version of “Sad But True”, but with a synthpop style chorus. Reznor maintains his angry snarl throughout, bitching about whatever he’s bitching about. “Pigs” are referenced, he sounds upset, angry, sad…aww!

“Help Me I Am In Hell” is one of the coolest tracks, a quiet two-minute guitar n’ noise respite. It sounds a lot like some of the quieter moments that would later come on The Downward Spiral (a genius album if there ever was one). Then, “Happiness in Slavery” serves as a barrage to the noggin’, Trent yelling stuff about slaves screaming in a distorted voice. There are some cool, ascending metal-y guitar licks and another synthpop chorus. If I had to guess, I’d say the lyrics are a thinly veiled discourse on getting screwed by your record label, as Trent was at the time.

The final song of this batch of tracks is “Gave Up”, another fast metallic song. It’s hard to discern the melodies from it, such is the distortion of the track. It does have a bad-ass keyboard solo though. Trent sounds like he’s singing on a broken tape deck and the guitars sound like they’re on the same cassette too. It’s my least favourite song on the EP, although I remember it had a cool “live” style music video with Marilyn Manson on guitar.

After 91 tracks of silence (a quaint-oh-so 90’s gimmick that I sidestepped by not ripping them) are the bonus cover songs. “Physical (You’re So)” is an Adam and the Ants tune, morphed into something that sounds like a cross between Nine Inch Nails and Motley Crue. This is a great track. Among the best on the album. There are jackhammer sounds, plenty of distortion and unidentifiable but cool sounds. “Suck” is a Pigface cover (from Gub) that Trent originally sang and co-wrote anyway. It has a powerful chorus and riff much like the rest of broken, but the verses (pun intended) kind of suck. That funky bassline…it’s not my thing, I guess.

One weird thing. I don’t know where it came from, but I somehow got a booklet for a Japanese version of broken. I found it inside my copy…I must have found it laying around at the store. Kinda neat to have, I can’t read a word of it, but cool. My CD appears to just be the regular single disc US release otherwise.

In a previous chapter, I mentioned that in 1994, I had created our store’s very first online ads. They were in colour, made in full glorious ANSI, and eye-catching. We even had a flashing logo on screen! I did this for free, because I was so passionate about the store. And it was fun! (Tip: One thing I had to learn was that if you do something for free once, it becomes expected later.)

The reactions were mostly positive. One guy, a 14 year old kid who went by the online handle “Mr. Self Destruct” (I think his real name was Justin), posted a message that was a bit of a wake up call.

“The kind of things I look for,” he said, “like imported Nine Inch Nails and Pop Will Eat Itself singles, you can’t get at a mall store like the one that Mike works at. You can only get those downtown, at the good stores.”

That burned! So I decided to do something about it.

The boss had always told T-Rev and I to order stock that we thought the store needed. We both took this to heart. T-Rev for example made sure we stocked things like the new Guns N’ Roses single (“Sympathy for the Devil”) and several other up and coming titles. Later on, Trevor made sure we stocked all the Oasis singles. I took care of the Nine Inch Nails side.

I ordered in “Sin”, Pretty Hate Machine, “Head Like A Hole”, Fixed, and Broken. Fixed had just been deleted, we missed that one. I ended up buying copies of “Sin” and Pretty Hate Machine for myself (we ordered 3 copies of each). Unfortunately, it wasn’t like having a few of these titles in stock changed the fortunes of our store. They sold all but immediately, but there was no sudden and dramatic jump in numbers. Yet, by summer 1995 we had a much cooler selection. I like to think we made a difference, albeit a small one, to music lovers. We sure did try anyway. It was more about just loving the job and store, and wanting to give 200%.

By that summer, we were even carrying live bootlegs. The boss picked them up in Toronto, and he’d walk in with a box full of 20 or 30. I remember T-Rev and I drooling all over them and the boss warning us that there would be no discount on these puppies! (I didn’t need a discount to want them!)

This period circa 1995-1996, was probably my personal peak at the record store. It was my peak time for happiness, for motivation, input, pride, and satisfaction. It was a time of mutual respect, fellowship, and hard work. I loved every day of it.

Our inventory now had some stuff that you couldn’t get at the cool downtown stores. I still have some of the bootlegs that I bought: bands like Guns N’ Roses (Covering ‘Em) and Nine Inch Nails (Woodstock 94). There were lots more titles (such as the Pearl Jam edition of Covering ‘Em), and our boss would try to get multiple copies of the good ones, like Nine Inch Nails. We even started getting in Japanese imports! I remember when we carried Hormoaning, by Nirvana, it was like $60 with taxes. The one guy who bought it had to trade in most of the rest of his collection to buy it. My buddy Aaron got the other copy.

I spread the word online, and a few of those people became customers. Guess who was among them? Mr. Self Destruct!

Yeah, I’m one of those jaded pricks who “only liked Queens when Nick was in the band.” I bought the other albums too, but of those only the live CD really did anything for me. Until now. I really …Like Clockwork! It succeeds completely at taking the Queens down a somewhat quieter and more mature road, while maintaining every ounce of their integrity. They are still sometimes heavy, experimental and haunting. But now they are almost always melodic, too.

Opener “Keep Your Eyes Closed” starts off somewhat slowly, but morphs into a bizarre Queens-meet-Alice in Chains concoction. It’s actually the one song on the album that I didn’t like on first listen. Imagine my delight in finding that I liked the rest of the album much more!

The most immediate song is second: “I Sat by the Ocean”. I put it in a category with songs like “If Only Everything”; it’s memorable on first listen. “The Vampire of Time and Memory” is a space-age blues, but with some Queen-like moments (Queen, not Queens). Josh’s understated vocals are classy and the keyboards create atmosphere rather than distract.

Next, the strangely-titled “If I Had a Tail” could have been released in 1981, or 1983, some time during the New Wave movement. If I heard this on the radio, I’d think it was an 80’s band. Only the occasional blasts of electric guitar remind me that this is 2013. Here’s the cool thing — this track reunites the Songs For the Deaf lineup in a way. Homme is joined by Dave Grohl on drums (who appears on several tracks), as well as Mark Lanegan and Nick Oliveri on backing vocals.

“My God is the Sun” is one of the tunes that sound the most like vintage QOTSA, and it is also one of the songs featuring Dave Grohl on drums. It has some serious heaviness to it, as well as that stuttering, stammering Queens vibe. All topped by the smoove as glass Joshe Homme vocals.

“Kalopsia” is a weird underwater easy jazz slow dance. Trent Reznor duets, and suddenly its an explosive Bowie number. Great tune. “Fairweather Friends” has piano. O, it has piano alright — by Elton freakin’ John! There’s also lots of rich guitar. It even feels Zeppelin-y at times. Maybe JPJ rubbed off on Josh a bit? Then things get funky on “Smooth Sailing”, but it’s a heavy funk with Homme in vocal falsetto. Fucked-up Disco? Sure, why not. The guitar solo is pure noisy heaven, but Grohl’s heavy hitting keeps it in the world of rock.

Soft guitars and a whispery Homme introduce a song called “I Appear Missing”. It’s hauntingly powerful, and dramatic. The guitar work here is incredible and intense. It’s also perfect as the penultimate track on a strong album such as this. And when your second last song is as intense as “I Appear Missing”, then it’s often wise to end the album with something quiet. “Like Clockwork” exists as simply piano and Homme for a couple minutes, Josh using his voice is ways I’ve never heard before. Instruments build, and it’s a beautiful sunset-stained closer.

I don’t know what Josh was thinking in terms of the packaging. I know he likes the colour red. I got that part. But all you get is a slipcase, a jewel case and a little card cover inside with minimal credits. It says to go to quotsa.com for “extended credits”. I paid for a physical copy, you’d think they could at least print the credits.

Musically? 5/5 stars. With this and Sabbath already upon us, I have two contenders for album of the year so far.

Fight was kaput. Rob had a new band, a photo of whom appeared in Metal Edge magazine. The band was called Halford, and although that would change, Rob used his surname for another band later on. I remember a weird looking blonde dude wearing a silver skin tight suit of some kind (more on him later), and I thought, “Well, OK then. This is going to be different.” Soon after the Metal Edge photo, the name had changed from Halford, to Two.

I had a buddy, Nathan, who was really into Nine Inch Nails. This Halford project was on his radar as well, due to Rob’s collaboration with Trent Reznor. At the time, Rob Halford insisted that the resulting album, an industrial/rock hybrid, was the sound he was going for all along when he quit Priest in ’92 and formed Fight.

I don’t believe that, but they did come close on the Mutations EP. I think Fight was exactly what he wanted to do at that time. When the second Fight album fizzled I think Rob questioned his musical direction, hooked up with Trent, and did this experimental record.

Two (stylized as 2wo) were experimental by Halford’s standards, but not by industrial music standards in general. Voyeurs has all the expected bells and whistles, including but not limited to: distorted vocals, the word “pig” in a song title, thumpy bass, ticky-ticky sounds, bloops, bleeps, and other stuff that sounds like broken machinery.

What does make this album special is that the band was “Two”, not “One”…meaning there is a second guy involved here, and what a talent he was. That guy was guitar player John 5. This was his breakthrough release. After this he hooked up with David Lee Roth, Marilyn Manson, Rob Zombie, et al. John 5’s involvement means there is some wicked guitar work here, including “I Am A Pig” which features a solo that sounds like a mashup of Morello and Satriani.

Highlight songs include “I Am A Pig” (Reznor sure loves his pig imagery), “Stutter Kiss”, “Hey Sha La La”, “Water’s Leaking”, and the epic closer “Bed of Rust”. “Bed of Rust” could have made a pretty cool Fight track. I would say in fact that there are no throwaway songs here. All of them have something worthwhile to offer. Just don’t think too much about the lyrics. Halford’s delivery is understated and, at times, whispery. No screams. At Reznor’s suggestion, instead Rob explored other aspects of his voice.

Other notable names: Bob Marlette plays bass and produces. Dave “Rave” Ogilvie does some production work. Trent Reznor “executive produced”. I always wondered what that means. I picture it meaning that Trent gives the project either a “thumbs up” or a “thumbs down” when the real work is done.

Of course many Priest fans didn’t get it, although a chunk of the Reznor fans (who at the time would buy anything on Nothing records) accepted and enjoyed the album for what it is. I think if this was a release by a more popular band, like say Nine Inch Nails or KMFDM, it could have spawned two or three singles.

Japan had a bonus track called “In My Head” which is absolutely impossible to find, so good luck. I’ve never heard it.

3.5/5 stars

Postscript:

It was during this period, promoting the Two album, that Rob Halford came out. People joked for a good number of years that Rob’s sexuality was the worst kept secret in rock. That can’t negate the courage that it took for Rob to come out in a musical genre that isn’t always kind to anyone who’s “different” (hello, Blabbermouth!).

“I think it’s difficult for everybody, you know, in making the decision to come forward and be who you are, based on peer pressure, especially if you’re a teenager,” Halford said. “That’s where a lot of the anxiety begins, and so maybe people like myself and others that do step in front of a camera and let the world know, maybe it’s of some help, where there’s an individual that’s been successful, that’s been able to achieve dreams and visions and goals in life and not let the issue of sexuality be something to hold them back, so I think it’s an important thing.”

Released in late 1994, Mutations (subtitled “collector’s edition“, which really means nothing) was a live/remix CD to follow War of Words. I seem to remember this being marketed as some sort of “extended EP” or some kind of not-album, which again is kind of meaningless. The original release was 45 minutes, a full length album by most measures.

Live Fight! Shame it was only four songs, as they absolutely kick ass. Rob Halford was still in peak voice in 1994, and every high scream is present on opener “Into the Pit”. Fight as a live band were less stiff than on the first album. They were no less precise, and each song is just as ferocious as its album counterpart. On “Nailed to the Gun”, bassist Jay Jay does the low death metal growls while Rob howls like a mad dog.

I was surprised that Rob put “Freewheel Burning” on the album, as he seemed to be trying to distance himself from his past at this time. Its the only Priest song and I don’t think they played many Priest songs on the tour at all (but I know they did cover Sabbath’s “Sweet Leaf”). Surprisingly it’s here that Rob’s voice falters, struggling with the demanding song. He redeems himself on the bluesy single “Little Crazy”.

I enjoy hearing live recordings from bands with two distinct lead guitar players trading off. Russ Parrish and Brian Tilse were both very different stylistically, and the contrast is awesome. The pace is aggressive, and these guys keep chugging on. (Note: Russ Parrish is not credited on this album. He had left the band by the time of release, but there is no question that he did play on all these tracks. Why he was not credited is a mystery, but he does appear on the remastered version cover art.)

I believe I am well on record as not being a fan of remixes in general. There are exceptions but so many remixes add techno-crapola that often serves to reduce the songs to repetitive mockeries of themselves. On a track like “War of Words” , they remove Scott Travis’ drums from sections, and replace him electronic beats. At the time I thought, “Why would you want to replace Scott Travis with a drum machine?” Today, it still bugs me. But hey, those who doubted the sincerity of Rob’s industrial work with Trent Reznor in Two should remember these remixes!

I’ll be honest, I struggle getting through the remix side in one sitting. There are some cool moments, such as the chance to hear isolated instruments and solos. “Vicious” is an example of a remix that works for me. It’s weird, it has an opera singer and dance beats added, but it’s pretty heavy and cool. But in general, the Fight songs were simple and repetitive to begin with. Making them simpler and more repetitive didn’t work for me. Sure, I own some Nine Inch Nails albums, but this sound isn’t where my heart lies.

Goodie-goodie-gosh, Mutations was reissued as part of the Into the Pit box set, with two bonus tracks. And these bonus tracks are (you guessed it) remixes. More versions of “Kill It” and “War of Words”. At least the “Culture of Corruption Mix” of “War of Words” is about half as long as the regular “Bloody Tongue Mix”.

Incidentally, why do remixes always have cliche sounding names? “Bloody Tongue Mix”! Raahhrr! Why not…”Toothpaste Mix”. Something original. I think remixers should strive to be more original in the naming of their work. Something nobody’s used yet. “I’m Rob Halford and I Endorsed This Mix Mix”.

I have published over 300 reviews here at mikeladano.com (use the search button on the top right to look up anything you want). Yet, I still hadn’t got around to Johnny Cash! That’s strange, because Johnny Cash is very special to me.

Everybody “says” they love Johnny Cash. Many of them jumped on board when he died and became “cool” again. Take Dandy, for example, a trend chaser who inked Johnny’s face on his arm a few months after he died. But hey, if you’re on board now, that’s cool. There’s plenty of room for everyone.

Johnny Cash was my first concert. In Canada in the early 1980’s, Johnny had an endorsement deal with Canada Trust, where my dad worked. Their brand new ATM machines were called Johnny Cash machines, and my dad even had some promotional Johnny Cash bills, a cool marketing gimmick. He went to see Johnny, his idol, when Johnny came to town. The first night of a two-nighter, my dad met him. On the second night, he brought me along (I didn’t get to meet him). Johnny modified his original concert opening by saying, “I’m Johnny Cash, 24 hour money machine” (in reference to the ATMs). I still remember June kicking off her shoes!

The Man Comes Around is my favourite of the American Recordings, helmed by Rick Rubin. It was also the last one released in Johnny’s lifetime. It is, all at once, extremely powerful, morose, joyful, and catchy. All filtered through Johnny’s unmistakable baritone, worn and weary but no less strong and expressive. Like other American albums, it is a mixture of originals and covers, oldies and more recent fare.

The most well-known song on American IV was “Hurt”, the Nine Inch Nails cover. It is remarkable by being so different, yet true to the spirit of the original. I prefer Johnny’s take on it to Trent’s, truthfully. “Hurt” is only one of many remarkable covers on this album. Johnny and Fiona Apple tend “Bridge Over Troubled Water”, with quiet mellotron in the background.

My favourite song is Sting’s “I Hung My Head”. I couldn’t believe the credits when I read that (having skipped Sting’s Mercury Falling album). I thought for certain this had to be a new Cash original. Lyrically, I was convinced this tragic tale came from the mind of the Man in Black, but I was wrong. It’s a spellbinding song, painting a clear picture, and Johnny’s delivery is perfect.

“In My Life” is the favourite of Mrs. LeBrain. She’s a huge Beatles fan. We selected this song for the signing of the register at our wedding. I received kudos on the musical selection from Tom Morwood and Jen’s Uncle Rick, who loved the Johnny. While very different from the Beatles version, I think I can safely say I like both equally.

I’m not too keen on the Depeche Mode cover (“Personal Jesus”), but I don’t like Depeche Mode much. I know some who think the cover is brilliant, so we’ll go with that. Johnny and Rubin tranform the song into a dark acoustic stomp.

Other highlights include the classic “Sam Hall”, which Johnny also performed on his 1965 album, Johnny Cash Sings Ballads of the True West. I love Johnny’s energetic delivery on this traditional. We enjoyed this one at the record store, a lot. “Danny Boy” is another from 1965 (Orange Blossom Special) that Johnny takes a second crack at. This time it’s a more intimate affair without the backing vocals. Johnny compensates with his rich storyteller’s voice, each flaw telling a story of its own.

The album closes with “We’ll Meet Again”, the Vera Lynn classic. I always think of Kubrick (Dr. Strangelove) when I hear this song. So for me, I can hear a sly wink in “We’ll Meet Again”, a hint of humour, as if Johnny knew this would be the last song on the last album released in his lifetime.

But it’s not really the last song. On my wishlist is the vinyl edition, which had two bonus tracks: Marty Robbins’ “Big Iron” (another personal favourite) and an exclusive version of “Wichita Lineman”.

My copy of the album came with a bonus DVD. Nothing to get excited about, it’s just the music video for “Hurt”. Granted that’s a great video, but the DVD is less special in 2013 than it was in 2003. Now, everybody Youtubes.