Thursday, September 20, 2012

Paddington Stats with Orange Lady Marmalade

I’ve calculated the results so far, and if you are using any
other’s information to make your bets, you’re doing it wrong. I know it is
still early, but I’m giving you a 70% winning percentage ATS which is 20 points
higher than my closest competition. Do yourself a favor and listen to me.

Week 3 Results:

3-2 SU / 2-2 ATS

Season Stats:

12-3 SU / 10-4 ATS

This week, I decided to take a break from predicting the
good games of the weekend to focus on sure winners. It's not exactly the
Divination's strategy, but I guess I will stroke his ego and give him credit. These
teams should be bet against heavily week after week. You may not win every
week, but you will profit over the season. Guarantee.

Except for Florida State and Clemson. I was forced to pick
that game.

GOTW

Clemson @ Florida
State (-13)

So, this is a matchup of two ACC teams. I don’t like the
ACC. I don’t watch the ACC. I admit this has all the trimmings of a great
matchup, but I don’t care about that and I certainly don’t care about this
game. I'll be watching K-State/Oklahoma.

YAWWWN! Florida State wins 21-10

LSU @ Auburn +20.5

Gene Chiczk looked like a coaching genius when he, two years
departed from a dismal coaching record in Ames, led the Auburn Tigers to the promised
land of a SEC National Championship. Fast forward another two years and
the Gene Chiczk Iowa State fans were so un-enamored with has resurfaced in Alabama. Tiger fans don't fully understand what is happening, yet, but
they soon will. They will not tolerate mediocrity for long, and the only thing
that has saved Chiczk’s rear end to this point is Cam Newton and the boosters
who bought him in (not a typo). Gene does not coach; does not inspire; and
certainly does not make good players great. He wins only when his talent far
outweighs the competition’s. Without that, he is mediocre AT BEST and will be
fired at the end of the season, if not before.

But, this is about the game, not my hatred of some two bit
college coach. LSU has better talent and a better coach. I know Summer is officially over tomorrow, but
Chiczk's seat becomes hot this weekend.

LSU 42-21

Kansas @ Northern
Illinois (-10)

Normally, I would be appalled at the notion a MAC school could
be a double digit favorite over a Big XII school. But, that school is Kansas,
and as we have pointed out week after week, they are not good. They did show
some statistical fight against TCU, but I’m not sure who TCU is yet this year.
Northern Illinois is a decent, mid major program. Hi, Matt Barry. They gave
Iowa a run for their money in the first week of the season, and beat the Army
Black Knights on the road in a high scoring adventure. They will win their
third win this weekend, and Kansas will officially look towards college hoops
season.

Northern Illinois wins by two touchdowns 28-14

Air Force @ UNLV (+10)

I thought there was some hope for UNLV this year with their
opening effort against Minnesota. Yes, I stated that Minnesota was bad, and yes
I was right about that, but I still walked away from that game with a feeling
of hope. As an Iowa State fan, I’ve felt that feeling many times and should be
wiser because of it, but I fell for it again. Northern Arizona was a warm slap
to the face of Rebel fans, pulling them harshly from the dreamy space of
Optimismdom. I empathize with you. I do. I understand and have been there
before. Hell, with the Cyclones 3-0 heading into an off week, I might be there now. All I can say is, take advantage of your inability on the
field. You live in a town where sports betting is legal. Visit your local book
and make money off of your misery. I will.

Air Force wins and covers 24-10

Colorado @ Washington
State (-20.5)

How are you 14.5 point dogs to Washington State? THE
Washington State who have shown they have yet to fully grasp Mike Leach’s “hey
we’re going to throw a bubble screen here” philosophy? I’ll answer. You’re
Colorado. A team that Savannah State is calling repeatedly to see if they can
get on their 2013 schedule. A team that
lost to California State-Sacramento, a FCS participant who went 4-7 last year
finishing 6th in the Big Sky Conference. A team that was losing 55-7
at halftime TO FRESNO STATE last weekend!

Colorado makes Kansas look like the 1994 Nebraska
Cornhuskers. Washington State is bad, but Colorado is just horrendous. Please
put your money against Colorado every week from this point on. You’ll love me
for it.

Washington State finds their mojo against this pathetic
offering with a win and a cover, 55-10