Thoughts from the interface of science, religion, law and culture

After spending several years touring the country as a stand up comedian, Ed Brayton tired of explaining his jokes to small groups of dazed illiterates and turned to writing as the most common outlet for the voices in his head. He has appeared on the Rachel Maddow Show and the Thom Hartmann Show, and is almost certain that he is the only person ever to make fun of Chuck Norris on C-SPAN.

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Benny Hinn: Revival Begins with Billy Graham’s Death

Famous evangelist Billy Graham is 93 years old and in poor health, so his death at any moment would hardly be a surprise. And it looks like faith-healing fraud Benny Hinn is positioning himself to take over that mantle, telling followers that God has shown him that Graham’s death will mark the beginning of a huge American revival of religious fervor.

Preacher and televangelist Benny Hinn has said on a Trinity Broadcasting Network program that he believes when the Rev. Billy Graham dies, America will experience a major religious revival.

In remarks recently delivered in the United Kingdom posted on YouTube, Hinn said that the famous 93-year-old American preacher’s death would be a sign.

“The sign will be Billy Graham’s death,” said Hinn, as another individual on the video spoke of “a manifestation of power” being brought down on thousands of people.

“You are talking about a people in hiding, just like Elijah was hiding … The Lord said to me in ’89 – yeah, ’89, He said when Oral Roberts and Billy Graham go home will be the key, will be a sign, of the beginning of the greatest revival on earth. Oral is home. Billy is about to go home. And when he does, I am telling the whole church, get ready.”

And I doubt that Hambone lost any appreciable sleep when Doc dinosaur got banged up for being a criminal.

When the dumbfucks start behaving and sounding like circling vultures when their own competition are going toes up, it is not much of a guess to realize monetary gain comes well before godliness…or even morality let alone ethics!

Wasn’t “going home” an euphemism for getting processed by the Soylent Green factory?

Doc Bill,
Start playing “Yakkity sax” while showing video of dishonest televangelist…
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“the famous 93-year-old American preacher’s death would be a sign”
I am from Sweden so forgive my ignorance, but is not a sign supposed to be something unusual? Like, maybe, a 93-year-old continuing to live for another 20 years?

Or in other words – when BG finally kicks the bucket, the commercial fundagelicals will finally abandon the last of the veneer of decency they affect. (BG being, as far as I can tell, a comparatively honest man for a full-time religious campaigner and something of a restraining influence on his fellows).

Franklin Graham is already in firm control of dad’s enterprise. A week after the funeral, it will be like nothing at all happened.

Including BG’s daily newspaper column in my local rag. Every single question has the same answer, “devote yourself to god”. A team of monkeys without a keyboard could keep that going. And though Franklin is far more venal than daddy, the money will continue to pour in.

Hinn just looks like a desperate money-grubber. Which he is. Sadly, only 59-years-old, so unless he gets ALS or cancer (one can only hope), he’ll be conning people for decades.

so, when yet again a Christain fails in his prophecy, will the Christians turn against him and actually follow their bible on what to do with such false prophets? Of course not, they’ll be sure that their favorite prophet just was mumbled to by this god.

So how, excatly, is the cause of fundamentalist evangelicals supposed to be advanced by the utterly unremarkable death of someone who, whatever else you might say about him, was a preacher of genuine talent, who far outclassed the vultures circling him now? What are the mechanics of this miracle of addition by subtraction?

I just read this article to my wife, a recovering Baptist, and she couldn’t stop laughing.

Hinn trying to replace Graham would be like Cal Worthington replacing Enzo Ferarri: the basic gestalt between the two men is so different, on so many levels, that there is no (sane) way of comparing them.

I never had much use for Billy Graham. Our theological views are vastly different — damn little commonality between a hollering Baptist and a lapsed Deist — and his style of preaching makes my teeth hurt. However, I will always extend respect to the man for the level of ethics and integrity he has. Billy Graham Ministries is organized in such a way that Graham himself can’t touch the money; the level of accountability extends in every direction.

Also, Billy Graham was never a faith healer, unlike Hinn, Oral Roberts, ad nauseum. A noisy fire-and-brimstone bible-whacking maniac on stage, sure… But he held a healthy contempt for faith healing. You’re sick or wounded or crippled? Why the hell are you at a revival, and not, y’know, at a hospital being treated? That’s what doctors are for.

Lastly, here’s your trivia for the day:
Pin-up/bondage queen Bettie Page — Yeah, that Bettie Page — spent some time in the early 1960s working as a volunteer for Billy Graham Ministries. She wanted to sign on as a full-time counselor, but they turned her down… Not because of her past career of posing for pictures for lonely men to masturbate to, but because she was divorced. Seriously: they didn’t care about her softcore porn gig, but being a divorcee jinxed her deal.