Sharon Todd, 66, and her stepfather Stephen Connor, 98, thier Orange, California, homes on Friday, June 16, 2017. Connor entered Todd’s life when she was 25 years old and became the father figure she didn’t have growing up. Now at 98, Connor gets a little assistance from Todd on every day activities. Todd looks up to Connor for his honest, hard-working nature and his fun, social personality. (Photo by Jeff Gritchen, Orange County Register/SCNG)

Fathers: Some can be role models, pillars of strength and assurance (or, if not, as close as they can get) in times of need.

Today, Father’s Day, we offer a few stories of Orange County dads and what they taught their kids.

Some led by example, others by words. But they all have one thing in common:

They were there.

From left, Erica Brewer-Crandall, her father Tollie Ronald Brewer and her sister Veronica Reynolds. Erica got married at the Little Chapel of the West in Las Vegas, which was the same chapel her parents married in 1969. (Photo courtesy of Erica Brewer-Crandall)

Knott’s Berry Farm in 2006. Pictured are my father Tollie Ronald Brewer and his mother Reba Brewer. Before his Alzheimer symptoms worsened, for many years he took my grandmother to lunch weekly at Knott’s Chicken House. I was lucky enough to go on many of the later in life lunches and saw how deeply he loved my grandmother, just like he did all of the important ladies in his life. (Photo courtesy of Erica Brewer-Crandall)

Brunch at Goofy’s Kitchen in 2013. Pictured are husband Sam, son Elijah and father Tollie Ronald Brewer. He loved being Papa to his grandsons Jack Reynolds and Elijah Crandall. He passed in October of 2013 due to complications from dementia & Alzheimer disease. (Photo courtesy of Erica Brewer-Crandall)

Camping in Big Bear around 1979 or 1980, pictured are Tollie Ronald Brewer with daughters Veronica and Erica. (Photo courtesy of Erica Brewer-Crandall)

Sharon Todd, 66, and her stepfather Stephen Connor, 98, thier Orange, California, homes on Friday, June 16, 2017. Connor entered Todd’s life when she was 25 years old and became the father figure she didn’t have growing up. Now at 98, Connor gets a little assistance from Todd on every day activities. Todd looks up to Connor for his honest, hard-working nature and his fun, social personality. (Photo by Jeff Gritchen, Orange County Register/SCNG)

Seven

Melissa Barrera struggled to find words to describe the sacrifices her father, a solo parent, made for his kids — all seven.

With her parents already split, Barrera and her siblings were left in a tough spot after their mother chose to leave the kids, too. For one thing, their father, Richard Rodriguez, didn’t have much money.

But he came back to his kids, opened a carpet-laying business, and rented a one-bedroom apartment in Stanton. It was all he could afford at the time.

After working two months straight, he found a four-bedroom home to rent.

As they grew he worked a lot, but he wasn’t absent.

“He would make sure we had what we needed,” said Barrera, 40, who lives in Orange. “Before going to work, he would do our laundry. He was the first one up and the last one to bed.”

Being a single dad with daughters, Rodriguez learned a lot during their teenage years.

“Hitting puberty wasn’t easy,” Barrera said. “There were really no women that we looked up to.”

Somehow, Rodriguez, now 67, was able to make time for the family to take trips to Disneyland and Knott’s Berry Farm.

“We would make sandwiches in the car,” Barrera said.

Rodriguez’ ability to maintain his business, which he still operates, and make time for his children while raising them on his own, was empowering, said Barrera. She’s now a mother of five..

“You can make it on your own and be a good parent,” she said. “He just showed me that it didn’t take a lot… You just need to show that you’re there for them.”

Birthday Dad

Finally, at age 25, Sharon Todd had someone she could look up to.

That’s when Stephen Connor became Sharon Todd’s stepfather. In the 41 years since then, he’s taught Todd, of Orange, to be honest, kind and respectful — all while making her mother the happiest person on earth. Todd said her biological father left when she was 9, after her parents divorced. So Connor offered something different; a father figure.

Todd, now 66, looks up to Connor because of his honest, hard-working nature. Connor served as a Lieutenant in the Army during World War II and, upon his return to civilian life, spent 50 years working as a pharmacist. Today is his 98th birthday.

“He is such an honest person,” Todd said. “He has instilled in me the (ideal) of not judging other people, even though I do sometimes… To accept people as they are.”

Connor has always had a passion for people, and for having fun, Todd said. And even though it’s lower on the list of life lessons she’s picked up from Connor, his philosophy of having scotch at happy hour and wine at dinner is also something she’s taken to heart.

Critically, any time Todd needed a little assistance, Connor found a way to make it happen.

“The love he has shown us, when he didn’t have to…it means everything,” she said. “I have a dad. I’ve had a dad for 41 years.”

At 98, Connor needs some assistance getting around. Todd is more than willing to provide for him.

“It’s hard to explain what (Connor) means to me, because I never really knew my dad,” she said. “To have someone like this come into my life and accept…all of us for who we are and welcome us with open arms, it mean everything to my siblings and me.”

Love helps

Sometimes, just the way a father carries himself can be big.

Erica Brewer-Crandall, of Huntington Beach, grew up watching her father, Tollie Ronald Brewer, show his love through passion and presence.

Brewer passed away three years ago, at 73, but he left a legacy for his four daughters.

Brewer-Crandall, 38, is married and has a son, Elijah. She used her father as an example for the type man she wanted as her husband.

“My mom always would say I married someone similar to my father,” she said.

Strongman

It should have been one of the best moments of Angela Claro’s life; the birth of her third child.

Instead, she spent much of the next few weeks in a psychiatric hospital, nearly consumed by postpartum depression.

Upon her return home from Riverside Regional Center, Claro received strength from a regular visitor; a 60-something man who had spent years toiling in Mexican strawberry fields and overcoming alcohol abuse. That man, described as nonreligious, sat at her bedside reading the Bible.

Her father.

Becoming the man who could give a daughter strength required Roberto Claro to make some adjustments. He also prepped for a new role — grandfather to Claro’s three kids.

It’s given Angela Claro a new vision of her father.

“I don’t see his errors anymore. I just see a good guy who still gives me strength.”

Nathan covers crime and public safety for the Daily Breeze. Prior to joining the coverage team in the South Bay, Nathan worked for the Orange County Register, where he covered south Orange County cities and community sports. A freelance play-by-play broadcaster, Nathan can be heard calling high school baseball and community college football games during the spring on his days off.

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