Ask someone with Schizophrenia anything.

Not normal, but not an indication of pathology either. I do this as well. It's what some people need in order to understand a situation. I think
perhaps if we had some intelligent people to speak with most of the time, this ability would never have come to be.

Sometimes there's more than a half dozen personalities playing out various situations in my mind. As long as it's more of a benefit than detriment,
then see it as a gift, and don't worry if it's normal or not!

Mhm! I'm an artist, I love the visual arts, and music. I am definatly right brained.

And about "hearing things as if they were from an outside source", it's much different than the inner dialogue, which we all experience.
It's like listening to a radio, except I can choose what I am listening to (sometimes I can't, though).

Sometimes with other people though it can also be about irritation. When i'm struggling to hold my mind together and not forget what it is that i'm
actually meant to be doing, the last thing I want is some prat waffling in my ear trying to make small talk! Although I never actually would,
sometimes I just wanna punch them! However well-meaning they are.

With my oldest friends and family, they automatically KNOW when it's a good idea to leave me the hell alone and so they do. Do you ever find
this?

I can hear my own thoughts. I hear things, as though they are coming from an outside source. If I imagine a song playing in my head, I'll hear
whatever my mind comes up with........
Well, I've always been strange, anti-social,........
Anyways, for the past three years I've had really bad depression and it's only gotten worse......
I lucid dream as well. .........

I have all the above, I think it's fairly normal except the depression. I don't have any hallucinations and I have seen a few strange things before
but most of the time I was not alone and others witnessed it, Including my mother. I've been depressed for 8 years now and I have been hospitalized
for trying to take my own life. I still think about it from time to time.

Anyone else think these things quoted are fairly normal?

As you asked, here is my two cents:

"I can hear my own thoughts" - TTBOMK this inner-ear mind dialogue of your thoughts, imagination and memories is typical and common.

"I hear things, as though they are coming from an outside source." - Good hearing will enable us to hear things coming from an outside source. My
concern is your choice of phrase: "..as though they are.." therein lie the difference. A barking dog, the radio playing or a car horn honking is
coming from an outside source. When the bookcase is telling you what to do, if inanimate objects are expressing themselves to you, things of this
nature require professional attention.

".. I have seen a few strange things before but most of the time I was not alone and others witnessed it, Including my mother." - As have we all.
Glints of light, shadows, reflections, sunbeams, you name it. And yes, most people has seen things they can't explain. Life is full of unanswered
questions. Not a problem.

"I've been depressed for 8 years now and I have been hospitalized for trying to take my own life. I still think about it from time to time." - We
both know this is not typical. I hope you are receiving professional attention from a licensed legitimate physician trained in the psychiatric field
of medicine.

I have been fighting the good fight for 10 years now. I was so broken I could not function. One day at a time; heck, one minute at a time, if that's
what it takes. Get through that one minute, then you can think about tackling the next. Do what you can, work at it and you'll see better days. Be
well my friend.

It was my choice to try medication. But it's more for my anxiety, and panic attacks, which they do very little for, if anything >_>.

Originally posted by LargeFries
heyJude, knowing now that you are dealing with mental illness in your life, have you chosen not to have children?

I'm in favor of eugenics, and I believe that life is pointless, and brings nothing but sadness. I would be a hypocrite to bring someone into this
world.

Originally posted by LargeFries
will you be up-front and honest with those you date? i understand issues as serious as mental health are not topic for breaking the ice. there comes a
point in dating where either it's over early, it's temporary sex or she has the goo-goo eyes for you and a wedding ring (sorry all for the crude,
poor analogy).

I've only been in one real relationship, and that left me heartbroken. She was fully aware of my issues, and she had her own issues as well.

I'm uneasy about the thought of getting into another relationship, but I would definatly tell a potential partner about my problems.

Originally posted by LargeFries
my personal choice is not to duplicate. and i'm an advocate of eugenics. i feel more people have to step up and take responsibility for their actions
and life choices. i used to visit the mental health portion of a wellness site. it overwhelmed me how many people were dead set on having children.
these were people afflicted with bi-polar disorder. considering many people present with a list of problems recognized at diagnosis, it seems like
these folks might not be candidate for Parents of the Year IMHO.

what is your opinion, heyJude?

I think everyone should commit suicide.

Originally posted by LargeFries
One last Q: for heyJude --- Do you look at your family line or history with different eyes now?

Both my grandmother, and uncle were Schizophrenic. What exactly are you asking me?

Thanks, By the way I forgot to edit out hearing noises or voices from an external source, Mine are all internal.
I'm not seeking any medical help, I don't see any point and I hate medication. After all it's psychological and I can overcome this feeling.
Another feeling I have, I get this heavy feeling in my stomach often, Almost as though my heart has sunk....It sucks big time.

Sorry OP I don't intend to steal you're thread and I hope you don't mind me posting this. Three years in your home is a long time

Originally posted by superwurzel666
Sometimes with other people though it can also be about irritation. When i'm struggling to hold my mind together and not forget what it is that i'm
actually meant to be doing, the last thing I want is some prat waffling in my ear trying to make small talk! Although I never actually would,
sometimes I just wanna punch them! However well-meaning they are.

With my oldest friends and family, they automatically KNOW when it's a good idea to leave me the hell alone and so they do. Do you ever find this?

I rarely talk to my parents, or siblings, and my extended family is not aware of the extent of my issues.

But they do know that I am quiet..

Originally posted by superwurzel666

I also find drawing, painting or birdwatching very calming, actually.

I love all of these things. Next time you are bird watching, stay perfectly still, and make a "shh shh" noise. The curious noise will attract them,
and they'll come right up to you.

Originally posted by mr-lizard
Are your experiences comparable to say a bad '___' trip (if you have ever experienced it)?

I've had a bad trip on '___', once. I thought that the uinverse in it's entirety was merely my imagination, and the moment I stopped thinking,
everything in existence would cease to be.

What I experience normally, is like a very light dose of '___', constantly.

Sometimes I also find things like trees or rocks and things suddenly take an "animated" aspect, almost as if they have somehow become conscious and
are trying to reach out to me telepathically. Sometimes quite sinister and scary but sometimes very beautiful, depending on my mood at the time.
Does this make any sense to you?

Have you attempted at following scientific method to deduce whether your hallucinations were real or not?
Did you experience contact via your five senses (beyond vision) relating to what you have seen?
If so, then who is to say what is truly reality, you may be the next evolutionary step in mankind's evolution.

You're not the only one to have seen shadow people, I'm not diagnosed with anything, nor are any of my friends,
but when we were all young, we saw shadows at the corners of our eyes that would move and disappear the moment we looked at them. You might be onto
something...

Admittedly, you could be dream walking, our brains produce a hallucinogenic drug when we sleep, it's what makes us dream. People who wake up in sleep
paralysis often hallucinate, this is because their mind is in a transitional phase between sleep and non sleep. When this chemical is active while you
are awake, it could account for your hallucinations.

I wouldn't call it a mental illness at all, merely your brain producing a chemical it isn't supposed to when you're awake. You seem pretty normal
to me.

As for the depression and sadness, along with pessimism and suicidal thoughts, what can I say, if you were rich you wouldn't have these feelings and
thoughts. It's nice to have a prestigious career, wealth and a woman by your side that is loyal and loves you for who you are. It's nice not to
worry bout what you gonna eat tomorrow or how you gonna pay rent so you don't end up homeless. Anyways, this is a sociological issue, so I'm not
going to get into it.

Maybe you have a few wacky stories to share with us relating to your experiences with this phenomenon, I would be inclined to read more on it. By the
way, have you figured out what the voices are?
If anyone likes to study themselves, they will notice that just before they fall asleep, their brain starts to relive the day's experiences, often
times right before sleep a conglomeration of voices and ideas will swarm your mind,
they are memories being relived and processed by the brain all at once. Your brain might be processing information while you're awake. Ever have
sleeping problems? Insomnia? If anything, I'd classify your condition as a sleeping disorder. I don't believe in mental illness, everything has a
root cause. People are too blinded by their egos to find the real causes of events, they prefer having the phenomenon molded around their individual
theory. mind you, my own is a theory, do comment on it, i wonder what you think about it.

As for the depression and sadness, along with pessimism and suicidal thoughts, what can I say, if you were rich you wouldn't have these feelings and
thoughts. It's nice to have a prestigious career, wealth and a woman by your side that is loyal and loves you for who you are. It's nice not to
worry bout what you gonna eat tomorrow or how you gonna pay rent so you don't end up homeless. Anyways, this is a sociological issue, so I'm not
going to get into it.

Even if you had all the money in the world it would not make a difference. I find myself turning down big deals because I know whats important in life
and money is the least of my worries, Doesn't make me any happier. Although sometimes I try to spend just to fill up my emptiness...

Originally posted by superwurzel666
Sometimes I also find things like trees or rocks and things suddenly take an "animated" aspect, almost as if they have somehow become conscious and
are trying to reach out to me telepathically. Sometimes quite sinister and scary but sometimes very beautiful, depending on my mood at the time. Does
this make any sense to you?

It makes perfect sense to me. Although, for me, they are never sinister in nature.

It's more like, just "being", neutral. I've had tree branches grow out of nowhere, and surround my vision. And I've sat in the middle of the forest,
experiencing everything breathing along with me. Not actual in and out breathing, but you could tell that everything was alive and there was a shared
consciousness between everything and everyone.

Originally posted by woodwytch
This is a fantastic thread ... and extremely generous of you to offer this open-house policy.

Most people have questions about a variety of mental illnesses but rarely dare to ask ... especially not dare to ask the person with the condition ...
for fear of being thought rude.

Thanks. That's why I made this thread.

Originally posted by woodwytch
>>>How long has it been since you were officially diagnozed ?

Two weeks. But I knew I was Schizophrenic before that.

Originally posted by woodwytch
>>>Does the medication that you've been prescribed work as well as you'd hoped ?

Nope. I still suffer from panic attacks, and I become very sad for the most seemingly insignificant of reasons.

The meds do nothing for my hallucinations. Although, with Seroquel, I get to sleep when I want, which I am not normally able to do. I'm nocturnal, and
I'm used to going to sleep when the sun is rising.

Originally posted by woodwytch
That's it for now ... depending on your replies I may have some follow-up questions

I know its hard, but be optimistic. That video of Mckenna had a ton of wisdom for you.

My grandmother was a schizophrenic. I was never diagnosed, but i believe I am or was. The stress and drug use after high school brought it on i
think.

I pretty much gave up all drugs. i love to drink to get out of my head once in awhile, but thats not why Im posting.

The earlier video is spot on. Your different, and you should be happy about that. It wont always be this hard. If your smart you will work your ass
off. If your remotely like me you have very powerful moments of obsession with ideas. Harness those and read, think, talk, and learn about everything
you "need" to know. Dont avoid the things your bad at, work at them.

I used to avoid people out of fear. Now I can deal with them so effectively its making me smile now. I really want you to understand that if you
decide you want to accomplish competency in life, you have the tools.

best way I can explain it is, Your mind wont let you "stop' or relax. hard to reign in or harness that early on. But as you age, you will figure it
out. All these normal people will for the most part stop learning and establish their "functional"(a very key word) identities early and then they
are set until their mid life crisis. lol. As Mckenna says, "the western mind is a house of cards" and i believe it to be as a result of the
socialization of college.

keep your chin up(not a useless expression), keep working, and dream about reaping the benefits in 10 to 15 years.

Do you have a pet?
Since people are probably hard to get along with because of hallucinations, a pet might do you some good, for purposes of company. At least then, you
would know if you are hallucinating when your pet tells you to F off or whatnot lol.

Pretty much everything you'll find on John Nash online and in the movie is BS. I read his biography in middle school. The movie is wrong in every
aspect of his life and condition. He started seeing stuff in newspapers and was on to what the government was doing; I really don't think he really
had schizophrenia. It was most likely the drugs that messed his mind up. Litterally everything in the movie is wrong, except what school he went to
and the theory he came up with.
Just because I think Nash wasn't schizophrenic, doesn't make the disease fake. It is a very real, dehabilitating disease.

I'm at the bottom of the barrel, if you can't find happiness in your life then you aren't creative.
There are tons of activities that you could be doing, snowboarding, skydiving, deep sea fishing,
whale watching, there is a ton of things you could do, go bowling if you don't feel like leaving the city. I'm sure you could join a kayak club or a
soccer team somewhere, play poker, be inventive, if you hate people paint, create music, make a video, make a video game, if you love people, start a
side business, start a charity, join the red cross, do I need to go on? Money brings means, no money brings helplessness, depression and suicide. You
have to give yourself a meaning to life, not stare at the ceiling and expect to be happy about it.
These are things I wish I could do, but cannot due to lack of wealth, count yourself lucky.

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