A
very special welcome to the pussies who read The BEAST, from Hillary Clinton’s
hardcore supporters.

We’re
talking about the women, of course. We don’t intend, however, to
ignore the men. Not by a long shot. In fact, we have a very special message
for all the dickless wonders—yes, now we’re referring to the
men—reading this issue.

If Barack “Barry” Hussein Islamofascist Terror
Sleeper Cell Ivory Tower Elitist Obama should somehow manage to weasel
his way to the Democratic nomination, brace yourselves for requital on
a biblical scale.

You think you know about love? You haven’t the
first notion. We will do anything and everything to secure the Democratic
ticket for Hillary and the impotent faggot VP of her choosing. But if,
by some patriarchal conspiracy, she is denied what is rightfully hers,
we won’t hesitate for a moment to scuttle Obama’s campaign.

You think we’re at all daunted by the prospect
of a McCain presidency? You think the threat of overturning Roe v. Wade
really scares us? That’s you guys, isn’t it? Always thinking
with your crotches and ours. Well consider this: If anyone but Hillary
gets in, you’re all cutoff. And that’s not
a figure of speech: any handy jagged implement will do. We’ll make
Lysistrata look like an episode of “Ally McBeal.” Suddenly
sucking out your degenerate spawn doesn’t seem all that problematic.
And trust us, we won’t be missing anything.

While we’ve got you by the balls, so to speak,
try wrapping your tiny, flaccid minds around this—it’s a stretch,
we know, but think long and hard about it—is this
how you want things to go down? Yeah, we know all too well that you don’t
understand the first thing about going down. So, take our word for it
here. You don’t want Obama bad enough.