At long last, the first song from the long-awaited (although we’re not sure how much-anticipated) new Guns N’ Roses album Chinese Democracy is here. Idolator tipped us off to this streaming download:

…and we, like many others, have given it a few listens. Here’s our take, the track has legitimately Slash-y axework, it features Axl-squeal-voice and tough-guy-Axl-voice, and–AND submits the words “nation” and “masturbation” in one lyrical breath. Wow. We mean… WOW.

Okay, so it’s clear that these sexy bitches are no longer the men we’re rocking to…

…but they’re still trying. And we don’t hate what they’re doing (or that they’re doing it) entirely. We just hate it…mostly.