(Un)kept: The Calvin Klein and Nick Gruber story

As a writer and a gold digger (having two full-time jobs is so exhausting), I am in total support of Calvin Klein's former boy-toy writing a tell-all about their two-year romance. Oh, yes. I support the scorned boy-toy tell-all because it combines backstabbing whorishness with art, and that is a beautiful thing.

Here are the details:

In 2006, Calvin Klein divorced his second wife of 20 years, photographer Kelly Rector. A few short years later he started dating 20-year-old Nick Gruber. The "relationship" lasted two years, until Gruber's cocaine habit spiralled out of control and he was arrested for getting into a fight at a penthouse party in Manhattan. Gruber was sentenced to 20 days of community service, entered rehab in Arizona, and told TMZ that Klein "has been supportive of my sobriety. I've been keeping clean, which is good. I've been fully clean on drugs and alcohol."

Gruber also went on his Facebook page in May to post, "I don't want to go back to my old self. I want to focus on my future." Which apparently includes switching teams — he's recently been spotted locking lips with Chelsea Heath, who was named by Girls Gone Wild as the Hottest Girl in America in 2010. Gruber's future will reportedly also consist of a tell-all book about his relationship with Klein, tentatively titled What Came Between Me and My Calvin. Best. Book. Name. Ever. The tell-all has created big buzz in the publishing industry, with three major publishers already making offers.

A ghostwriter is penning the book, and the writer spoke anonymously to NY Daily News about the project: "This is the only way [Gruber] can get closure. He has a lot of secrets about Calvin, and he has a right to tell people. If it was just Gruber's story there's no way we could sell the thing, but because it's about his relationship with this very private, very high-profile person, it's generating a lot of interest."

Poor Calvin Klein. Doesn't he know the memory is always sweeter when protected by an ironclad confidentiality agreement? That's like Number 2 on the Sugar Daddy How To. But I guess he was a little stuck on Rule Number 1: Don't let your boy-toy eat solely with his nostrils.