Controversy erupts after HBO Canada announces alternate history series where French won Seven Years War

OTTAWA – HBO Canada has come under fire after announcing a new series, “QUEBECADA” that depicts an alternate history where the British were defeated by French forces during the Seven Years War.

“These wounds are just too raw,” said long time subscriber William Fielder. “It’s insulting to all of the soldiers who gave their lives so that English words could be printed in a larger font on any packages sold outside of Quebec.”

However, creator Graeme Manson (Orphan Black) defended the project and explained how he conceived of the idea. “I had a nightmare where the Prime Minister was French, an organization policed language, and if you spoke English to a French person, you’d be treated like a second class citizen.”

The series will follow the story of a single mother, played by Elisha Cuthbert raising her teenage son in French occupied Ontario. “The show is just so nuanced” remarked Cuthbert. “For instance, my son is forced to study English up to grade 9, but despite learning it for nearly a decade, the only english words he can remember are ‘library’ and ‘pineapple’.”

Many English speakers are upset that the series will be primarily in French Canadian without any subtitles. “It might as well be in Dothraki, cause I won’t know what the hell they’re saying”, complained Farah Gilroy.

Even though the show has garnered a great deal of negative feedback, HBO executives say that at its heart, Quebecada illustrates our nation’s universal truth.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re French or English, we can all take comfort in knowing that Indigenous Canadians and people of colour will remain completely and utterly neglected.”