Like I said, I was showing off really cos she was with me. It was about the twenty-hundredth house that we’d knocked at and to be honest, I was pretty bored of everyone just giving out sweets. The kids loved it, obviously, but we were fed up of it. Well, I was. And she looked so fit and she was out with me and I suppose I wanted to show off.

So when this bloke came to the door with a little Tupperware of gummy hearts and then rushed back in to answer his mobile, I decided that he hadn’t treated us and so deserved a trick. Which wasn’t really fair I suppose; I’m sure he would have come back again in a minute with the sweets but he shouldn’t have gone off like that when he was talking to us, it’s just rude when people stop your conversation cos the phone rings. The kids were restless though and I was a bit pumped-up and feeling really mischievous so I egged them on.

Honestly though, I didn’t think it would end up like that. It was just meant to be a little prank. And she’d looked at me as if to say, “Is that really a good idea?” And I just thought “Fuck it, I’m not a kid, I’ll do what I want to.”

She texted me this morning to say she couldn’t really go out with someone without eyebrows.