We Finally Broke Up

No, not me and Dan. We (i.e. Dan and I) finally broke up with Sally, our couple's therapist! I can't tell you how happy I am about it. I've been wanting to end sessions with her for a while now, but instead of being honest with her, I would show up and act out, get all tense, and eventually cry. Then Sally would be like, "See, you clearly don't have your emotions under control. I'll see you next week." I would leave hating her, angry at myself for sabotaging the situation. And I'd get even more pissed off when I paid her bill. So how did I finally get it together to end things with Sally amicably? It's funny you should ask.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

The reason that Dan and I started seeing Sally in the first place was because we couldn't come together. We would fight and not listen to the other person's points. We couldn't agree on anything. We didn't express ourselves the same way. So we went to Sally. And even though I think Dan and I felt like we were done with Sally (for now...hey, you never know when you might need to go in for a checkup!), once we actually ended our sessions with Sally successfully, I know for sure that going to Sally for the past 3 years ACTUALLY WORKED. You see, Dan and I finally sat down and had lengthy conversations over how to break up with Sally, that we wanted to break amicably so we could always go back, and crafted how we were going to present our case to Sally. In other words, we worked AS A TEAM. in fact, we worked beautifully as a team.

More From Redbook

Dan told me that I had to stop acting out and sabotaging the sessions. Instead of freaking out, I listened to him. I told him that Sally tends to think Dan is a bit more emotionally-stable than me, so he should bring up the breaking up. We made our points so well, that we were both sort of shocked when Sally said, "OK...let's just check-in in 6 weeks. But of course I'm always here for you both." We walked out of her office and high-fived (totally lame, I know, but such a high-five moment!)

Now...it's on to the real work—it's up to just Dan and I to figure out our problems without the crutch of our therapist's couch. Can we do it? Stay tuned!