Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Muharram 1430 H has just started. Endless text messages beeped on our mobile phones. Same with me. Thank you, people. Sorry if I did not reply your text messages. I may have forgotten but the thought counts a lot.

New Year 2009 starts tomorrow. As usual, we will have a list of new year resolution. DO we really follow the list or we just merely do that in order to follow the current of what others are doing?Only we have the answer for that.

I will be back in Sabah very soon. Mixed feelings again, but this time, I will go back with more confidence (ye la, gaji dah ade kan..heheheh).

To all out there, i would love to seek apology for all the hurts I have caused in you, for all the spiteful words I have said and for the unintentional or intentional acts I have done to you. I am very sorry for that.

Happy New Year 1430 Hijriah and Happy New Year 2009. May Allah bless the new year ahead of us and may this year be a better one than the previous years.

anyway, going back to the title.. iduladha has just said bye bye to us.. but what more important than the meat and mutton is the Niat (intentions). why do we bother to sacrifice some goats and cows when we don't even bother to clean our hearts?

the material does not mean much to Allah, what is counted would be the sincerity in the qurban. although it has been ages since the first qurban started by Ibrahim a.s., the essence of it is the one we should highlight.

i went for one of the jumaat prayers in Gelugor, and nearly laughed my heart out during the sermon (opss.. i didn't, because during the sermon we have to be quiet). Dr Danial mentioned that there are places where the mosque people would distribute some coupons per family so that that could be used to "redeem" the meat that are to be given after qurban. what happens today is that there are some human beings who photocopy the coupons just for the sake of the free meat!

sama-sama kita fikirkan ye..

(jgn jadi mcm artis.. semua benda"no komen".. we have to think and realize what is going on in our community and even in our religion)

Monday, December 1, 2008

I went to a party,And remembered what you said.You told me not to drink, MumSo I had a sprite instead.

I felt proud of myself,The way you said I would,That I didn't drink and drive,Though some friends said I should.I made a healthy choice,And your advice to me was right,The party finally ended,And the kids drove out of sight.I got into my car,Sure to get home in one piece,I never knew what was coming, MumSomething I expected least.Now I'm lying on the pavement,And I hear the policeman say,The kid that caused this wreck was drunk,Mum, his voice seems far away.My own blood's all around me,As I try hard not to cry.I can hear the paramedic say,This girl is going to die.I'm sure the guy had no idea,While he was flying high,Because he chose to drink and drive,Now I would have to die.

So why do people do it, MumKnowing that it ruins lives?And now the pain is cutting me,Like a hundred stabbing knives.

Someone should have taught him,That it's wrong to drink and drive.Maybe if his parents had,I'd still be alive.My breath is getting shorter, MumI'm getting really scared.These are my final moments,And I'm so unprepared.I wish that you could hold me Mum,As I lie here and die.I wish that I could say, 'I love you, Mum!'So I love you and good-bye.

Well, just felt like typing out something.I have been busy with lost of stuffs..Got a new cam la! Adoi.. Will upload pics when I get my lappy back on my lap.For the time being, it is being treated at the Centre because boat trips at banggi and kudat have spoilt the DVD ROM.. sangat kesian.. takpelah ujian Allah tak pernah henti atas hambaNya.

Behind all the tiredness, something remarkable is the relation between the mind and the lectures.

Whatever said during the lecture does leave an impact,be it greater or maybe just a simple one to all of us (wait.. if you did not fall asleep during the two-hour slot each)

Educational managements, financial in education and the history do tell us something about the profession we are in.

An old saying goes like this, " As a teacher,we should be a guide by the side and not a sage on the stage"

How far is the truth?

I feel that as teachers, I have to put up with multiple roles so that I won't be distressed with all the endless workloads (hmm... does that mean I must be a hypocrite, adding to THE LIST which has existed so far and there are more people going into the list day by day?!) think about it.

and now..

Time to go to Lalaland, where nobody is a hypocrite there. I love it there. ALTHOUGH IT IS ONLY IN DREAMS, AT LEAST PEACE AND SERENITY is available there, bah!

Monday, November 10, 2008

One thing that made me so happy of the BTN was the Poco2 session... hahahah.. true, indeed, it was wonderful to use the poco-poco dancing/aerobic steps with Chinese, Indian and Malay song and even more wonderful is to see all Chinese, Indian and Malay participants dancing their ethnic dances in poco-poco steps! fuyooo... a big round of applause for the coordinator for being such a sweet lady!

What's more important behind that is the understanding that we share. Put aside the endless talks on Kontrak Sosial (redundantly said to make sure we hate their talks, lol), what more on the LDK sessions which might have hurt us in anyways it could. I feel that the same plates we shared, the food we ate, the jokes we laughed about and most importantly, the thoughts we discussed will remain forever and must be put at front so that this would be the most important agenda everytime we enter a class to TEACH.

The independence we have today will only be passed on to our younger generation if we have the openness and the ability to appreciate what we have.

I end the entry with a saying:-"To love and to be loved is the greatest thing in existence"

Hmm.. Stay in Sabah has come up to the fourth month now! Wow, time flies like nobody's business. I realize that I have grown to love the place I am teaching, the kampung people, the teachers, the goats and cows (oh ya, crocodiles are quite rampant in my area-- were they once tame??), and not forgetting, my darling students!

One thing that always lingers in my mind is-- The tidiness in whatever they do! I had my teaching practice back in Penang and was teaching in the heart of the town where pupils there were mostly from well-to-do families and did not have much of a problem as much as financial and education are concerned. I had hard times reading their untidy writing although they were darlings too! But in the place where I am teaching, the kids neatly wrap their textbooks with rice plastic packets or even the black plastic bags which we use as garbage plastic bags here!

To see that disheartens me a lot. But what makes me go all out to teach is their determination. They are indeed very poor in many aspects. Financial wise, they are given everything for free by the school. From school uniforms to pencils and erasers and also the free milk drinks (I had some too..wink wink)

Teaching and learning in class at times tire me a lot. All because there still are pupils who don't even know their ABCs although they are already in Year 4 or 5 or even 6! My question is-- What were the kids doing when they were in the primary classes? What did the teachers do then? To my surprise, when I asked around, I got to know that there were only 4 teachers (the HM, PK1, PK HEM and the one and only surviving Ustaz Wan) to teach 60 pupils all the subjects!

Then I got the answer for my dilemma. What I am doing presently is just drilling the kids whom I am teaching -- Year 1, 4 and 5, with reading. We only did reading lessons for the past three months and subsequently, we came up with writing and speaking lessons. Thanks to lecturers in I4p and UUM for giving us materials during our course which helped me a great deal in teaching songs and simple stories to the kids.

Well.. The title explains everything.. I haven't written for so long (totally occupied and equipped with school work plus no internet nor mobile coverage at Banggi Island which puts an undeniable full stop on my writings in the Internet!)

Have written in Friendster for a couple of times, but as my dear friends (like Syitah, Yati and not forgetting Dzull and Anne) who have always been motivating (did you people motivate me?! wink wink) to start a blog and keep it updated so that mine wouldn't fall in the "dead blog" category (quoting Dzull), at last, I found the time to start it

I am thankful that I can write here with all my heart and soul (wallaweh, jiwangnyeee..) to share and to be aware, to give and to live and finally to learn and to earn in anyways that can make me and others happy.. (ye ke??!)

I know my future writings would be at times emotional when other times it would be thought provoking and sometimes craving for attention (hahahah), yeah, need your views be it supportive or negative (anything da..) so that it can help me to cope with what I am going through or any of my friends or someone I know is going through any kinds of situation which you can help to repair.

Till then, I adjourn this entry with what Jedy ( a friend in my school) said to me when I first was asked to "teach" English for the teachers there. "Sir, something and everything here is terpelanting!" and my reply was only ... "What the.....????"