Odd Behavior Going On In Movie

Farrah Fawcett gets shot at, tied up, handcuffed, knocked unconscious and left for dead in a burning house in Criminal Behavior. Pretty much business as usual for the actress.

There is a difference, however, between this week`s ABC Monday movie and other films on Fawcett`s post-Charlie`s Angels credit sheet, such as Extremities and The Burning Bed.

Criminal Behavior is strictly for entertainment. There are no heavy social messages, at least not positive ones. The story isn`t even based on fact; it`s an adaptation of a Ross Macdonald mystery yarn.

The dark, shadowy film aspires to be a 1990s take on the film noir detective yarns of almost a half-century ago. Unfortunately, the story is muddled and confusing and the plot twists so bizarre and implausible they discourage rapt attention.

Fawcett plays Jessie Lee Stubbs, a freewheeling criminal defense attorney who is up to her coiffure in the sewage of society. And that`s just when she`s visiting her family.

Jessie is the only member of her clan who can move in and out of a courthouse without posting bond. Her father is doing hard time for robbery, her mother runs scams out of the family home and her brother`s a street drug dealer.

She descends deeper into the underbelly of society when she takes on a seemingly innocuous case of possession of stolen property. The accused is a nurse with a steady job, no priors and a plausible story. Her boyfriend gave her a ring she didn`t know was hot. In a fit of pique, she tried to hock it.

It turns out the rightful owner has been murdered. The pawn broker is trying to cut a deal with the cops, so he fingers Jessie`s client. Suddenly, possession of stolen goods is threatening to become homicide.

The woman`s predicament is an excuse to spring Jessie into action. Her client is all but forgotten for the next hour as Jessie wrangles with an array of weirdos, miscreants and misfits, the strangest of which is an already tortured self-hater who becomes even more suicidal when he discovers he unwittingly wound up married to his daughter.

Jessie consoles him as best she can. ``At least she didn`t get pregnant when you were sleeping with her.``

In spite of its dark plotting, most of Criminal Behavior adheres to this sort of lighthearted mood. The story might be serious but the execution is free- spirited.

However, elements of the show mitigate against it being dismissed as harmless diversion.

When a Neanderthal cop, horribly overplayed by soap opera refugee A Martinez, is relentless in his condescending and sexist treatment of her, she responds forcefully and colorfully in language Mr. Libido is sure to understand. Then she snaps off his car antenna to accentuate the fact that she is indeed ready to neuter him if that is what it takes.

Alas, within a scene or two, with no discernible adjustment in his attitude, he knocks on her door one night and in a matter of moments, she has her legs wrapped around his back as the two grope to tear off their clothes.

Maybe Fawcett`s roles in films with a social conscience were nothing more than jobs to her. Surely someone with her clout could have cleaned up the Criminal Behavior script if she had the inclination.

It`s hard to imagine that without her participation, ABC would have been interested in what would have been a less than mediocre mystery drama. Absent Fawcett`s star power, Criminal Behavior would rank with the low-rent women-in- jeopardy quickies on the USA network.