I have a complicated relationship with school. It was the only constant in my life growing up in east Los Angeles, but it wasn’t always a safe haven. It definitely shaped the beliefs I had about myself and not necessarily in a good way.

When I started Stanford I was not prepared – emotionally. In short, I wasn’t capable of taking full advantage of a fine institution. Interestingly, I’ve come to learn that I was not alone. Many college students lack important soft skills, but no one seems to want to teach these to adults. We’re expected to figure it out on our own – often the hard way.

It’s something that saddens me to this day. Because it’s only now, after years of working on myself, that I finally feel capable of learning.

Ms. Reifler in the video below makes my point: “When you think of Harvard and Yale and all those great universities, they need to have the person already made to go there.”