A new batch of winter shows falls upon us this week. Mama checks them out:

“The Finder” (Thursday, 9 p.m., Fox)

Listening to Michael Clarke Duncan read the phone book in his deep baritone for an hour would be more entertaining than this latest Florida-based detective series. It’s led by a brain-damaged, obsessed finder (Geoff Stults) whose character name, Walter (because old-sounding names are COOL), is repeated so many times, you’d think that the writers were trying to remind themselves what they were writing. The series is preceded by a leftover “Bones” winter finale that was bumped from its December schedule, so perhaps that’s an indication that Fox isn’t too excited about this latest procedural, either.

“Lost Girl” (Monday, 10 p.m., Syfy)

If you mistakenly assumed that because the word “girl” was in the title that Syfy was reaching out to female viewers, you’ll be disappointed to learn that the “girl” in this show is a leather-clad bisexual vixen who seduces men before eating their faces off. But it turns out she isn’t the only soul-sucking freak, and she’ll have to decide which side she wants to fight for. This slow-witted series longs to be “Buffy,” but isn’t nearly as smart.

“The Fades” (Saturday, 9 p.m., BBC America)

Mama’s having a bit of trouble distinguishing most of the characters from the BBC’s “Being Human,” “Bedlam” and now this latest group of young people in peril. But there’s no doubt about it: the Brits know how to scare. Sweet, nerdy Paul (Iain De Caestecker) foresees the apocalypse in his dreams, which causes him to still wet the bed at age 17 (can’t really blame him once you see his nightmares). But now the ghost world is crossing over, and the teen witnesses a Harry Potter-esque soul-sucking moment before being told he is among the chosen ones (maybe he and the chick from “Lost Girl” should hook up). Don’t watch if you tend to toward the squeamish side — these ghost hunters play rough.

“Alcatraz” (Monday, 8 p.m., Fox)

After watching the first two episodes of this new prison escape series, Mama has to admit she is thoroughly disappointed. The intriguing hook for this series is that when Alcatraz closed 50 years ago, the last prisoners were not transferred but disappeared — and now they’re back. But except for a couple of questions in each episode about “hey, this is weird, right?” and some improbable twists, mostly it’s just a “CSI: Time Travel.” What a waste of a concept and overqualified actors.