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Each Saturday night here at Smarty Pants, Ethbay will be holding tutorial classes for all those wishing to become fluent in Pig Latin. Class size is limited and is offered on a first come-first served basis, so Ignsay Puay Odaytay!

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Monday, October 19, 2009

I Love All Of My Children. Kind Of.

Dear FOTTSPers,

You know that I'd rather you spent all of your interwebbing time re-reading my blog, but if you need to take an occasional break from all the scintilating spirituality, may I recommend emailsfromcrazypeople.com?

It may not be scripture, but it is full of beautiful and uplifting stories. Like this one:

David writes, “This was an email in response to our University’s latest mailing of our Alumni Magazine. I have removed all specifics to protect the guilty.”

You should know that before I throw in the trash your stupid “alumnus” magazine, some of us have good education and recognize evil when we see it. Where is the report questioning the awarding of degrees in Sociology, Women’s Studies, and the like? Where is the article questioning the renaming of the Business Administration school to something from outer space like management? There isn’t such a thing as “management”, it’s just a title awarded to employees instead of giving them a pay raise. Come on Uof__, get with reality. Jeepers. You’re looking like a bunch of fools.

Look, its time to realize that woman aren’t people. They just repeat yesterday all over again each day. If you listen to their conversations, you will note the absence of verbs. They can’t do life. They can’t do Earth. You shouldn’t have all your staff positions occupied by non-humans. It shows in your Alumnus magazine. Fake nonsense is not a good idea.

3 comments:

I quite like the first comment on the original post "I woman. I not person. I from outer space. I from same planet as management. On management, there no verbs." http://emailsfromcrazypeople.com/2009/10/06/women-dont-verb-good/