Some Nights

Main Point: Life has many parts that leave us confused and unsure, but God gives us His Son to offer us confidence and sure hope.

The Song: Some Nights by fun.

Vital Info Before You Get Started:

Some Nights is the latest single out by the trio known as “fun.” It cracked the Top 10 on Billboard and iTunes. It’s getting plenty of play time on radio stations and even movie trailers.

The song is clearly about the casualty and tragedy of war, and the confusion it causes the lead singer. As you’ll see, it sets up a great discussion on the points of life that cause us to doubt and worry. (Our Youth Culture Window article provides even more background on the song and the band itself.)

This song has a couple of expletives in it, including the F – bomb. Most people probably won’t even notice it, because it’s not of the gratuitous nature, and many others won’t even catch it. But you should be warned that raw language is a part of this song.

Some nights, I call it a draw
Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights, I wish they’d just fall off

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I’m still not sure what I stand for oh
What do I stand for? What do I stand for?
Most nights, I don’t know anymore…
Oh woah, oh woah, oh woah oh oh
Oh woah, oh woah, oh woah oh oh

This is it, boys, this is war – what are we waiting for?
Why don’t we break the rules already?
I was never one to believe the hype – save that for the black and white
I try twice as hard and I’m half as liked, but here they come again to jack my style

And that’s alright; I found a martyr in my bed tonight
She stops my bones from wondering just who I am, who I am, who I am
Oh, who am I? mmm… mmm…

Well, some nights, I wish that this all would end
Cause I could use some friends for a change
And some nights, I’m scared you’ll forget me again
Some nights, I always win, I always win…

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost
Oh Lord, I’m still not sure what I stand for, oh
What do I stand for? What do I stand for?
Most nights, I don’t know… (come on)

So this is it? I sold my soul for this?
Washed my hands of that for this?
I miss my mom and dad for this?

(Come on)

No. When I see stars, when I see, when I see stars, that’s all they are
When I hear songs, they sound like this one, so come on
Oh, come on. Oh, come on, OH COME ON!

Well, that is it guys, that is all – five minutes in and I’m bored again
Ten years of this, I’m not sure if anybody understands
This one is not for the folks at home; Sorry to leave, mom, I had to go
Who the —- wants to die alone all dried up in the desert sun?

My heart is breaking for my sister and the con that she call “love”
When I look into my nephew’s eyes…
Man, you wouldn’t believe the most amazing things that can come from…
Some terrible lies…ahhh…

Oh woah, oh woah, oh woah, oh oh
Oh woah, oh woah, oh woah, oh oh

The other night, you wouldn’t believe the dream I just had about you and me
I called you up, but we’d both agree
It’s for the best you didn’t listen
It’s for the best we get our distance… oh…
It’s for the best you didn’t listen
It’s for the best we get our distance… oh…

Three Simple Questions (with Answers You May Be Looking for):

Q: What do you think the message of this song is?
A: It’s pretty clear that the song is about the terribleness of war.

Q: What were some of the things the singer seemed to be confused about?
A: He was confused about war, his role in it, the sacrifices that are a part of it, the anguish of taking another person’s life, etc.

Q: Why do you think he seems so confused about what he stands for?
A: He’s unsure because of all the inner turmoil he’s suffering. Deep down, he knows war is wrong, but he’s wrapped up in it right now.

Where to Take It From Here:
Wherever it feels natural. If these questions lead to a longer discussion on the topic, wonderful! (There’s a guide just after this paragraph that helps you do just that.) If your kids are barely uttering grunts, don’t get discouraged—the next time it feels right, try out another song. Keep engaging them.

For Deeper Discussion:(If your kids seem willing to dive deeper, the following discussion guide will give you a few pointers and practical ways to help you take it there.)

CLICK HERE if you want to look at a quick training article on small groups and drawing questions out of young people—you may find much of the information applicable as you go through this subject with your family members.

Transitional Statement:
That was a really powerful music video, for several reasons. First, it’s about war and the travesties that happen when humans kill other humans. Second, it gives us a glimpse of the doubt and confusion that we go through when life throws painful events at us. Third, after hearing the singer confess that he doesn’t know what he stands for anymore, it makes us wonder what WE stand for. The bottom line is simple to understand, but difficult to live out: life may leave us confused and unsure, but God gives us His Son to offer us confidence and sure hope. Let’s talk about that for the next few moments and allow God’s Word to encourage us.

More Discussion Questions:

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Are there some things in life that we do (or are done to us) that can cause us to lose or forget our identity? If so, name a few.

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: In the song, he’s saying he’s not sure where he stands on the issue of war and killing and death and sacrifice. What are some things that you aren’t sure about in our world today?

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Let me read this lyric to you again: “So this is it? I sold my soul for this? Washed my hands of that for this? I miss my mom and dad for this?” Does this line make you think he’s chosen well or poorly? Why?

Read the following passage from the Bible:

Hebrews 10:10-25 (NLT)

And what God wants is for us to be made holy by the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all time. 11 Under the old covenant, the priest stands before the altar day after day, offering sacrifices that can never take away sins. 12 But our High Priest offered himself to God as one sacrifice for sins, good for all time. Then he sat down at the place of highest honor at God’s right hand. 13 There he waits until his enemies are humbled as a footstool under his feet. 14 For by that one offering he perfected forever all those whom he is making holy. 15 And the Holy Spirit also testifies that this is so. First he says, 16 “This is the new covenant I will make with my people on that day, says the Lord: I will put my laws in their hearts so they will understand them, and I will write them on their minds so they will obey them.” 17 Then he adds, “I will never again remember their sins and lawless deeds.” 18 Now when sins have been forgiven, there is no need to offer any more sacrifices. 19 And so, dear brothers and sisters, we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus. 20 This is the new, life-giving way that Christ has opened up for us through the sacred curtain, by means of his death for us. 21 And since we have a great High Priest who rules over God’s people, 22 let us go right into the presence of God, with true hearts fully trusting him. For our evil consciences have been sprinkled with Christ’s blood to make us clean, and our bodies have been washed with pure water. 23 Without wavering, let us hold tightly to the hope we say we have, for God can be trusted to keep his promise. 24 Think of ways to encourage one another to outbursts of love and good deeds. 25 And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage and warn each other, especially now that the day of his coming back again is drawing near.

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Based on this passage – specifically verses 21-23 – what do you think God would say to the singer of the song?

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: We know that the singer of Some Nights was clearly unsure about what he stood for in life. Be honest; are you unsure about what/who you stand for in life?

ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: What does this passage tell YOU about YOUR doubts, fears, and confusion?

ASK ALL YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS: How will this passage affect your doubts and fears this week?

Wrap Up:
That video talked about two very serious questions: Who am I? and What do I stand for? Think about those two questions for a moment. The answers to those two questions aren’t necessarily simple. But more importantly, do you see how the answer to the first question Who am I? impacts the answer to the second question, What do I stand for? That can be good or bad, but that’s just life.

You need to have an answer to both questions. Who am I? God wants you to be His son or daughter. In other words, Who am I? becomes Whose am I? The only way for that to happen is for you to put your hope and trust and faith in His Son Jesus. Now that we know who we are in God, let’s talk about that second question.

What do I stand for? In the song, the singer answers his own question by saying, “Most nights I don’t know anymore.” But that doesn’t have to be you! I’d say that the best thing to stand for is what God stands for. He stands for love, hope, sacrifice, and truth, so I would encourage you to take a stand for those things, as well.

David R. Smith

David R. Smith is the author of several books including Christianity... It's Like This and speaks to parents and leaders across the U.S. David is a 15-year youth ministry veteran, now a senior pastor, who specializes in sharing the gospel, and equipping others do the same. David provides free resources to anyone who works with teenagers on his website, DavidRSmith.org David resides with his wife and son in Tampa, Florida.