Once upon a time this girl fell in love with this boy. Actually she's pretty sure he fell in love with her first. Anyway, they had two children together that are wonderfully smart, funny, handsome young men. They have a nice house in the southwest that she always wants to repaint. She finally turned 40 and he's beyond that by a few years. He loves baseball, she prefers her kids football games. All in all, it's not a bad life. See...

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There's WHAT in my bread??

I read food labels. Not religiously or anything but mostly for total carb count, calories and the first 5 ingredients. I'm fully aware that most of our food items have artificial color and/or flavor and usually don't give it a second thought. But after today I'm seriously considering becoming a raw foodie. Foodist? Raw-er? Rawgetarian? I dunno, but after hearing that human hair is a component in bread and that beaver anal glands are used to enhance vanilla used in things such as ice cream and to "spike" raspberry flavored things I'm all over it like white on rice. IF the white isn't titanium dioxide used to make skim milk or your living room walls white.

My friend just told me that she was talking to a lady that said she makes 2 or 3 loaves of homemade bread for her family every 2 days or so. Because bread has hair in it. And it's usually not hair from the United States, not that it matters much. It apparently makes taste and texture so much better. It's not like strands of hair sifted in with the flour, it's hair reformulated into a chemical concoction and poured into the batter. For consistency. Naaaahaaaassssty!

A month or so ago we all heard about the nastiness that is the Chicken McNugget after that girl collapsed and had trouble breathing, you know the one that ate nothing but McNuggets for 15 years...who apparently had no parents to slap that shit right out of her hands and offer up some fresh veggies instead. Anyhoodle, that whole McNugget thing got me thinking about changing a lot of the way I look at foods and what I eat. Now I'm thinking the only safe way to eat is to grow everything on your own and maintain a diet of "raw", unprocessed foods. Like Gwyneth Paltrow and Woody Harrelson. Except I don't think or live on the same level as them.

Oh, and I found out that wood pulp is used in A LOT of stuff. The upside of that is that even when you don't think you are getting fiber, you probably really are.