Friday, December 31, 2010

2010-11 Bowl Picks Edition

Happy New Years Eve everyone.

I hope all of you had a Happy Holidays with friends and family, and I trust that you will all celebrate responsibily later this evening.

It's almost noon, so I'm up against a Sun Bowl deadline....but I have to give some love to Derek Dooley and the Tennessee Volunteers. Derek Dooley is the first coach in NCAA history to lose two games he won in the same season. This guy is the anti-Les Miles. Hell, Derek Dooley totally explains Les Miles. That whole life balance, yin-yang thing...it all makes sense now.

Blame the refs all day long Vol fans...make an extra point and we're having a different discussion. I do think the head referee was premature in calling the game over...you HAVE to review that spike play...and I also think college football should adopt the NFL's ten second run-off in situations like we saw last night. But from a pure entertainment standpoint, that game was about as good as it gets. The Music City Bowl should win an ESPY for Biggest Clusterfuck of a Bowl Game Involving Teams with Pastel Colors.

Be safe everyone....

PICKS!!!

Sun Bowl
Miami vs. Notre Dame
Catholics vs. Convicts revisited? Waking up the echoes while grooving to some 2Live Crew booty music? Hardly. Reuniting these two teams, at this point in their respective histories, in El Paso, Texas....it has the same charm as watching Terry Funk wrestle Arn Anderson at the Charlotte/Mecklenberg County Fair. Both was well past their respective primes, and for the most part no one cares.
Convicts - 26
Catholics - 14

Liberty Bowl
Georgia vs. Central Florida
The home team squares off against my most hated rival on the planet. UCF was arguably Florida's best college football team, and they have a future star in QB Jeff Godfrey. This is an emotional pick, one that'll likely come back to bite me in the ass, but I get the feeling UGA isn't all that motivated, and UCF is eager for a little national respect.
Black and Gold - 24
Red and Black - 21

Chik Fil'a Bowl
South Carolina vs. Florida State
Speaking of most hated rivals, the ole ball corch reunites with the team that owned him during his glory days in Gainesville. FSU is on a steady rise, getting the UF monkey off their back in addition to making some serious noise on the recruiting trail. The Seminoles are indeed back....but South Carolina is better. The Cocks will have the best running back and receiver on the field, and their defense is superior. Spurrier beats Bowden Fisher.
Chickens - 34
Savages - 17

Gator Bowl
Mississippi State vs. Michigan
Odd pairing of a traditional power with a traditional doormat. Mississippi State officially locked down Dan Mullen for another 4 years, while Rich Rod could be shown the door any day now. Similar to the UCF-UGA game, one team is fired up to be there while the other wonders what the hell they're doing playing Mississippi State.
Miss State - 17
Meatchicken - 16

Capital One Bowl
Alabama vs. Michigan State
Michigan State's 1-loss season isn't as impressive as it looks, and Alabama's 4th place finish in the SEC West isn't as bad as it looks...unless of course you're an Alabama fan. I usually catch this game, thanks to free food and booze from my employer, but on this day I'll be in Tampa enjoying food and booze with some very good friends. Michigan State's highlight of the day will be their marching band's kick step entrance. Bama sleepwalks through the first half before waking up.
Tide - 30
Spartans - 13

Outback Bowl
Florida vs. Penn State
I'm tempted to do a reverse mojo pick here, but it's wasted on this game. Nothing I've seen from Penn State this season concerns me...and if UF can't get up for Urban Meyer's last game then they deserve to lose. In spite of everything that's wrong with the 2010 Florida Gators, I refuse to believe a 7-5 Penn State team is any better.
Crocs - 21
Lions - 10

Rose Bowl
Wisconsin vs. TCU
Can TCU stop Wisconsin's punishing rush attack? Can Wisconsin stop super ginger Andy Dalton and TCU's aerial attack? Stay tuned...this game has me totally baffled. I've never thought much of Wisconsin as a national power, and TCU crapped the bed last year against Boise State. If I had money to bet on this game, I'd take the over, and I'd take the team from the big boy conference.
Badgers - 41
Frogs - 38

Fiesta Bowl
Oklahoma vs. Connecticut
This would have been a great basketball game 3 years ago...Blake Griffin vs. Hasheem Thabeet. Hell, UConn-Oklahoma in womens hoops is 100 times more entertaining than this garbage matchup. There should be a performance clause in the BCS bylaws. If your conference champion continues to get beaten senseless on college football's biggest stage, you lose your automatic bid. Yeah I know it will never happen, but we can dream can't we?
Sooners - 45
Huskies - 10

Orange Bowl
Virginia Tech vs. Stanford
Andrew Luck is getting lots of love lately. Stanford was one bad night in Eugene from getting destroyed by Auburn in the national title game. Meanwhile the Hokies are only the hottest team in college football. I like the team who had the least distance to travel. Tech is becoming an Orange Bowl regular.
Hokies - 27
Cardinal - 17

Sugar Bowl
Arkansas vs. Ohio State
Just when you thought the NCAA couldn't be more inconsistent....they sit on Tattoo Gate for a year, then allow the kids to play the bowl game. Really? Who cares about next season? If all this stuff happened when the NCAA says it did, the Ohio State players in question should have missed five games this past season. Right A.J. Green? Meanwhile, no one is talking about Arkansas, and that's just fine with them.
Hogs - 34
SEC's Bitch - 24

Cotton Bowl
LSU vs. Texas A&M
When the next round of conference re-alignment happens, expect these two teams to face off every year. I don't know much about Texas A&M, but they don't have a prayer against Les Miles and his evil brand of college football sorcery.
LSU - 38
TAMU - 13

And finally....

BCS National Championship Game
Auburn vs. Oregon
How seriously is Oregon taking the BCS national championship game? They're unveiling new uniforms to be worn specially for the big game. A man much wiser than me once said, "The only cure for vanity is laughter, and the only fault that is laughable is vanity." Memo to Oregon: Your uniforms are ugly, and glow-in-the-dark neon green socks won't make you play defense any better.

No matter how you attempt to break this game down, you inevitably come to the conclusion that Auburn will obliterate Oregon. It's science....it's preordained...it's the motherf**king Southeastern Conference. It is what it is.

Auburn has the better defense, the better QB and better offensive line. Period. I can't come up with a scenario where Oregon wins this game....outside of AU turning the ball over 3-4 times...mixed in with Oregon blocking a punt and recovering the opening onside kickoff.