If you say so, I never watch that show, especially when I can avoid it. And I've avoided it pretty much since ever.

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I've only seen bits and pieces; I was talking about Kathy's stand up specials. There's at least three where she talks about her appearances on The View; two of them she ran afoul Barbara (one in which they still talk about on the show) and one where she ran afoul Hasslebeck.

So discovering that Jerry Nelson has passed away is actually gonna make this series a bit bittersweet. 5 Ball, which is next, is going to feature two of his characters fairly heavily - that of Floyd and the return of Robin the Frog.

Happy Sunday, folks! Here's a double header for the weekend! We're closing in the end of 6 Ball here, but the series isn't over! I've got stories all the way up to number one, so we'll be seeing a lot more of Miss Amanda. Here's the conclusion to chapter 4 and chapter five coming up!

Despite all his protests, Scooter allowed himself to be dragged up to their local coffee shop; the establishment usually saw the frog and go-fer every weekend when they’d be at the theater, getting their coffee and breakfast before they were to wade back into the life they proudly led every day.

The staff of course knew them, serving the troupe throughout their years in business, however they were familiar with Scooter and Kermit more than any of the others. Kermit directed his young friend to their normal table while he went up and got their regular order – two large coffees, a honey wheat bagel with cream cheese, and a blueberry muffin.

“You need to stop worrying, Scooter,” the frog began, dropping off food and taking his place in the chair across the table.

“You say that, but you don’t know, Kermit.”

“Oh sure, I don’t,” the frog replied. “Not like I live with the pig or anything. Listen, I completely understand, okay? If matchmaking and relationship meddling was an Olympic sport, Piggy would be a gold medalist fifty times over; with that said, she goes too far.”

“I’m not terribly upset with Piggy,” Scooter sighed. “I am upset about the fact that those four going to lunch caused me to treat my hopefully still girlfriend like trash. Piggy certainly knows how to wind someone up.”

“Preaching to the choir, my friend.”

The two took their moment to drink from their cups and take a few bites from their food.

“You do know the real reason Piggy took them to lunch, don’t you?”

Scooter looked at the frog in confusion. “Yeah,” he said. “They’re probably running Amanda into the ground.”

Kermit suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. “Scooter,” he said, slowly. “You know Piggy likes her. She has been raving about Amanda since the tournament.”

“Really?”

“Of course!” the frog exclaimed. “That impromptu dinner party of hers basically sealed the deal, as far as she’s concerned. This lunch with her and Janice and Camilla isn’t about taking apart Amanda, it’s Piggy showing off the girl to the other two. I shouldn’t even be telling you this, but…you know how that trio of theirs works.

“If you even allude to the fact that some girl you’re interested in has done you wrong, those three on pouncing on her like three lionesses in the wild. You’ll go crying to Piggy, she’ll pass you off to Janice, then she and Camilla will instill the fear of everything unholy on the unsuspecting soul who decided to break your heart. And you know I’m right.”

“Yeah, Kermit, I know,” the go-fer sighed.

And the fact was, he did know. He had gotten enough broken hearts during his teen years, it was a routine. He’d get his heart broken, he’d tell Piggy, and while he was being consoled by Janice or Wanda, Piggy and Camilla did whatever it was they did to ensure that the girl knew she had made a colossal mistake. Those three also made sure to screen any potential girlfriend to the point where Scooter was convinced they just didn’t want him to have a girlfriend.

“I’m not a kid anymore.”

“I know you’re not.”

“She’s gotta stop doing this.”

“Good luck making her stop.”

“I really like this girl, Kermit.”

“I know you do,” the frog whispered. “And Piggy and all of us are well aware of that. I can promise you we aren’t going to do anything to jeopardize this for you. Even if it means we stop each other from doing anything to jeopardize it.”

“I know.”

“Say the word, Scooter,” Kermit continued. “And I will make Piggy stop.”

“No,” the go-fer said. “I gotta talk to her on my alone. You can’t always fight my battles for me. I am an adult, you know.”

“Oh I know,” the frog smirked. “Sometimes old habits, as they say.”

Scooter nodded. He hadn’t been mad or necessarily upset, but the fact that Kermit understood where he was coming from and certainly, the go-fer couldn’t have been more appreciative that he had friends who looked out for him the way the Muppets did.

“Hey Kermit,” he began, before stopped. What exactly could he say? What did you say to someone who always looked after you, even when you didn’t want them to, and who always made sure that even when you made a mistake, wouldn’t let you suffer for it.

“Thanks, for…you know.”

Kermit smiled at the assistant. What did you say to someone who you’ve always looked after and basically watched them grow up in to someone you couldn’t be prouder of?

Initially wondering at the true purpose for being invited, Amanda had come to the conclusion that it didn’t really matter. She had enjoyed herself and really, had seen the ploy for what it was. The Whatnot had long been aware that the Muppets weren’t just long time friends, but family and with that, came all the parental overseeing and sibling rivalry that any large family experienced. She had seen and heard just how much Scooter looked at the others as a surrogate family, but she had only recently seen that they saw him the same way.

This lunch wasn’t just about making sure that Amanda was a good fit for Scooter, but a good fit with the Muppets in general. She had listened to the three discuss the girls who had never achieved what she did, those that thought the assistant their meal ticket to the stars or that they would control him for their own reasonings; and like any sister or mother, Piggy, Janice, and Camilla had made sure that had never come to pass.

Amanda didn’t know how far this relationship would go, but she hoped to keep it going as long as Scooter wanted it to last. She wasn’t afraid to admit that she was completely enamoured with him and continued to be every day that they were together.

And she was going to do whatever it took to ensure that Scooter knew he was one of the most special people she had ever met.

“Thinking about Scooter again.”

“Yes, I am,” she smirked, well aware that she had gone on a Scooter walk and not caring that she had. “Did you want to know what about?”

The table laughed at that, which apparently actually caused Camilla to do a minor spit take, which of course caused more laughter. Unfortunately, that move wasn’t due to the fact that Amanda wasn’t thinking about Scooter in a particularly platonic way.

“What is wrong with you?” Piggy asked, seeing that her chicken companion was distressed. “Who?”

“Well, well, well.”

It had been too late for the quartet to escape the sight and leering of one Ace Reporter, writer for the Daily World, a sleazy newspaper that had once employed Fleet Scribbler. Fleet, who had been a correspondent when the Muppets had been recording in England, had been a somewhat helpful sort in getting the name of the Muppets out to the world.

Or rather, he was instrumental in getting the word out about Piggy to the world. Scribbler had seen the rising stardom of the diva and had done everything to showcase her, while simultaneously disregarding the rest of the Muppets. At the time, that had suited Piggy just fine; she was the star of the show and it was about time that someone recognized it.

Of course, Fleet’s real reason wasn’t to just feature Piggy on page three, but to make up as much dirt on the show that he could. Once he had set his sights on the frog and his relationship with the pig and that of the other cast members, it had been a done deal between the English reporter and the Muppets. As reporter knows, the story is the most important, regardless of how people feel about it.

When Fleet’s persistence had begun to start a divide, the leeway that the reporter was given – and ultimately thought he had – was broken, completely. If Fleet so much as looked at one of the Muppets the wrong way, he would be on his way to a punch in the face and Piggy had made sure he was quite aware of that.

Hollywood gossip always sold papers and Ace Reporter had been determined to sell the most he could. He had only been at the paper for a few years by the time that the Muppets had gotten back together and he had been determined to find out why they had split in the first place. Luckily, he didn’t have any real dirt on them, but that didn’t really matter to Ace, not when he could make up his own dirt.

And if making up stories about the inner workings of Muppets wasn’t enough, he was a well-known letch to the point where he made Gonzo’s playful leering look like child’s play. And every time he saw any of the women of Muppets, he was never hesitant in stating how much he would like to see more of them.

“If it isn’t the six finest pair of breasts in Hollywood,” he said, causing those six in question to cross their arms across their chests. “And I’m not taking about the chicken either.”

“Like, isn’t a rock you need to be under?” Even Janice hated him and Janice didn’t hate anyone.

“And miss seeing you?” Ace countered. “Can’t see much under a rock. And how’re you, Diva? Looking svelte as always.”

“I can only be thankful that we’ve eaten,” said diva replied. “Because if you had shown up beforehand, we wouldn’t have any appetite.”

Camilla noted that she could barely keep her food down as it was.

Ace was prevented from saying only because he noticed Amanda sitting at the table. “Well, hello there,” he said. Holding out his hand for her, he said, “Ace Reporter.”

“Hello.”

“And you are?”

“Not interested.”

“How can you not be interested?” he asked. “I’m totally interesting.”

“As interesting as a brain aneurysm,” Piggy murmured. Turning to her guest, she said, “Dearheart, you don’t have to stand for this. In fact, it’s way past the time we leave.”

“Hey now,” Ace interrupted. “Don’t go. We still have a lot to talk about.”

“No, we don’t,” Amanda countered. “Miss Piggy is corrected. We have a lot of things to do and I have a boyfriend to get back to.”

“Quite the opposite,” the Whatnot countered. “He’s much handsomer than you.”

“Ouch sweetheart,” the reporter said, holding a hand over his heart. “That’s kinda mean. You don’t even know me. What’s this boyfriend of yours have that I don’t?”

“Do you really want me to start listing?”

“Hey, I’m not so bad,” Ace said. “You should go out with me and find out.”

“What part of ‘I have a boyfriend’ did you not understand?”

“The boyfriend part,” the reporter countered. “C’mon baby, dump the chump and take a chance on a real man.”

“Oh if only there was one here,” Piggy said.

“You stay out of this, piglet.”

“In sitting here, I’ve made a poem on your praises.”

“Pretty and talented,” Ace said. “Lay it all on me, sweetheart.”

“Oh, how I loathe thee,” Amanda began. “Let me count the ways. One dragon punch to the face, two quick jabs to the stomach, followed by a roundhouse and two haymakers to the body…”

The color drained from Ace’s face. He was used to the threats from Piggy, but never someone as lovely as the redheaded Whatnot that he’d been trying to pick up. “I see that present company seems to have influenced your thought processes.”

“We should be getting back,” Piggy replied, smirking at the put out journalist. “Lest we lose wonderfully paid for lunch.”

The quartet stood and left, leaving a bereft Ace Reporter stewing in his own ego.

“Dare I ask just how you knew all those moves?” asked the diva.

“My uncle’s a former lightweight prize fighter and kick boxer,” the Whatnot responded. “As soon as I hit puberty, I was in ‘training’ every weekend. Comes in handy when someone thinks they can mug me.”

“Well I guess so!” the blonde guitarist laughed.

Camilla chuckled, whispering to Janice that she definitely liked the redhead.

We all like the redhead, , that's why she's become a favorite OC to the cast.
There are a few typos there in the bit when Ace first approaches the table, I'll let you try to fix them on your own though.
So... Someone who puts even Fleet to shame. And with no regrets about it.

The segment with Scooter and Kermit at the coffee joint was probably your best overall effort in here so far, it shows the connection they share on many levels.

Returning to the madness of Muppet Theater seemed to raise the white flag to everyone concerned. Scooter and Kermit had made it back just moments after the womanly quartet had returned from their own lunch. While Scooter was quite eager on repairing the damage he had inflicted on his own relationship, he needed to speak to the resident diva first.

Thanking Kermit for lunch, he had immediately headed upstairs to Piggy’s dressing room, knocking once before opening the door and letting himself in. “Piggy?” If he had hoped to get what he needed off his chest, he was disappointed as the starlet wasn’t even in her dressing room.

“Looking for me?”

“Yes, actually,” the page replied, spinning around at the voice. Piggy stood in the doorway, but had since entered and closed the door behind her. “I need to talk to you.”

“Scooter, let me explain…” she began, but was quickly interrupted by Scooter.

“I talk, you listen,” he said, gulping when he saw her narrow her eyes. There were very few times in which Scooter could get away with talking to her like that – very few – and he was toeing the line at the moment. “If I don’t say this now, I won’t have the nerve to.” Taking a deep breath, he continued.

“I’m not a child, Piggy.”

“I know that,” she said, nodding when he gave her a look. “Sorry.”

“I mean it,” he said. “You can’t fight my battles for me any more; I’m a grown man and I can pick who ever I want to date, okay? Now, with that said…with that said, you’ve saved me from a few heartaches that I could’ve done without. There were a couple of girls I ran afoul with when I was at Google and…I really could’ve used you to…open my eyes to the light, so to speak. Could’ve saved me some heartaches there too.

“The point is…I really like Amanda; I mean, really like her. And not you or Janice or Camilla or anyone is going to do anything to stop me from liking her. I didn’t think I could choose, but…please don’t make me choose.”

“Are you done?”

“For the moment, yes.”

“My dear, sweet Andrew,” she started. “Do you remember what I told you that night Connie Reynolds broke your heart?”

Truth be told, he couldn’t remember the girl, though he vaguely remembered the heartache; however, he clearly remembered what Piggy had said. “That you’d never let another girl or woman break my heart.”

“And I mean to keep that promise,” she replied. “Despite my own indiscretion. Quite frankly, Janice and I are under the impression that there will never be any girl who could measure up to our stands; however, Amanda Cosgrove has rated pretty high, higher than any of your previous girlfriends.”

Stepping closer to she ruffled his hair affectionately. “I would never make you choose,” she whispered. “And I’m a bit insulted that you think I would.” Walking around him, Piggy made her way to the vanity that was kept against the wall, which allowed her to not only get ready, but view someone coming from the door through the front facing mirror.

“I know you wouldn’t,” he whispered.

“I care about you too much to begin to stand in the way of your happiness, whatever it might be.”

“I know.”

For the second time that day, Scooter had demonstrated his ability to be a complete and total jerk. “It’s important to me that you like her, too,” he confessed. It was something he had already mentioned to Piggy, right before they had scheduled that impromptu dinner for eight; while he of course wanted all the Muppets to like Amanda and vice versa, there were particular Muppets that he still needed to prove himself to and seek approval from.

Kermit was one and Piggy was the other.

“If Moi didn’t like her,” she responded. “Moi wouldn’t have invited her to lunch. Believe me, Scooter, I think little Miss Amanda is more than capable of taking care of herself, even against the Unholy Trinity of Evilly Good Intentions.”

“I see you changed the name.”

“Sounded better,” she stated. “And despite you being a brat for most of the afternoon, Moi made sure to paint you in a better light than you painted yourself.”

Walking over, Scooter placed both hands on her shoulders. “And I am eternally grateful when you do,” he said, right before placing an affectionate kiss on her cheek.

“Alright, get out,” she groused, patting one of his hands. “Adults have things to do.” She watched as he smirked, giving one of her shoulders a squeeze before turning and heading towards the door. “Incidentally,” she began, stopping him as his hand reached the doorknob.

“Amanda likes you just a much, though I think at this point it’s well past like, wouldn’t you agree?”

Smiling, Scooter only said, “Goodbye, Piggy,” before making his way out the door.

Taking the stairs back down to the first floor, Scooter noted that Amanda had managed to meet Walter, who seemed to be whistling a tune to her enjoyment; of course, it also helped that Fozzie and Gonzo were doing some juggling routine around the poor Muppet, which registered as barely concealed terror on his face.

The assistant immediately stopped, mesmerized by the sight of Amanda laughing heartily at the routine and joking with those involved. She had her hair down around her shoulders and it bounced lightly as she laughed; she must have sensed him because she turned and caught his eye, smiling at him in such a way that Scooter’s hand reached out to grab the railing if only to steady himself.

Amanda Cosgrove was beautiful in every way – heart, mind, and soul and Scooter wasn’t sure if he could ever get enough of her. Her hair was as soft as silk and its color often reminded him of a sunset on a warm and sunny day; her eyes always seemed to have a certain gleam in them and sometimes that sparkle was aimed at him. And when she smiled, oh when she smiled!

Choir of angels on clouds, with wings, and harps.

In that moment, suddenly everything made sense to him – why he had been so concerned on her reaction to the others, how they perceived her, his panic over that disastrous dinner, and his behavior on learning she was having lunch with the axis of evil. And when it hit him, his grip on the bannister only tightened, as though if he let go he would turn into jelly.

He loved her.

Scooter Grosse was completely and totally in love.

And yes friends, that is the end to Six Ball Merengue! What's next in our Pool Hall series? Well, I present you with Five Ball Cha-Cha! As you can see, our little Scooter has discovered he's in love, but now what does he do? Why, he goes to those whose romantic entanglements have been a source of joy, wonderment, and heartache for the young Muppet.

Can Kermit, Gonzo, Floyd, and Rowlf help our young go-fer out?

There'll be singing, some dancing, some lovin', some Star Wars references, and Scooter gets his very own go-fer or frog-fer!