Chan Lowe: Romney's damage control

Romney's damage control

September 20, 2012|by Chan Lowe

It wasn’t supposed to be this way. A lousy economy, a vulnerable incumbent, unlimited money, great hair and a resolute jaw—everybody at the country club said it would be a cakewalk. Mouth a few platitudes, bamboozle the proletariat, throw some crumbs to the crazies, and the campaign would practically run itself. Election day would amount to a restoration of the aristocracy.

The White House would become another gem in the charm bracelet of presidential residences. If anything, the executive mansion would be a downsize—but you have to admit it has good location, and a finished war room in the basement to entertain all those neocon foreign policy veterans of W’s who always seem to be hanging around.

Nobody was counting on smartphone technology, though. Ya gotta keep up with those developments, trivial though they may seem. The bartender at that Boca mega-mansion was no doubt one of those whiny, freeloading 47-percenters, probably working for tips so he wouldn’t have to report his income to the IRS. Well, at least there’s some common ground with the parasites on that issue.