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Discipline

A persistent villain.

When it comes to writing, I’ve been called a grinder. Talent lurks in the shadows, but mainly I work my ass off. I’m persistent, I take criticism on the chin and push forward. I’m teachable and determined to succeed. This hasn’t come easy. I’m not known for self-discipline.

I learned late in life that I can’t just snowboard, surf, party, go to work and all will be right with the world. I didn’t party so much, but man did I get good at surfing and snowboarding. To this day I stave off the adolescent who wants to stay up late, eat cheesecake, binge watch an awesome show, leave my dishes in the sink and still have life be awesome. It’s sad but true. Now, I self-parent.

I work from home. No one is putting me on a deadline, telling me what to do or checking in on my progress. It’s all me. I’m getting better at it, but I know I can get good at it. When I keep that in mind, I persist. Small accompliments, like publishing a short story, are victories — a positive feedback loop telling my subconscious that the discipline I have self inflicted is working.

Waking up every day to grind out a story, not knowing where it will lead, is Sisyphean. Although Sisyphus’s chore was a punishment from The Gods, it fits in the metaphor of what I do every day. Wake up, feed kids, get kids to school, come home, write, exercise (sometimes), pick up from school, make dinner, go to bed, repeat. At the end of the day I can say that life is pretty good, discipline is just a part of it.

My sister who absolutely loves her two girls told me one of the hardest parts of being a parent
was the “routine”.
She called it Groundhogs Day like the movie. Both she and her husband are extremely creative people and she sometimes found it a bit wearing on her. Now one of the girls is graduated from college and the other a junior in college. The fun they have now with their young adult children makes it all worth it. Discipline is a necessary evil for the highly creative person. It’s a vehicle to get somewhere worthwhile. Just don’t lose your spontaneous and creative spark by the weight of it.
I love the ease and truthful way you write. Simple and elegant. It rings true and it’s courageous.
You are willing to set aside the “look good” and share the real stuff. It’s fantastic !