I've been having a big old pity party tonight. NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE ME.

But I thought about it. I was partnered for about ten years, had a beautiful house with room for a pony.

As I look back, he did love me. I did love him. And we still love each other. As a couple we were pretty toxic.

A couple of years ago I went back to the town where we lived and after a week staying with him went screaming into the night because he started to pull the same old shit he used to pull on me. And, I began to respond in the same old way. That's why I fled.

I still think about him, but it's a non-starter.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 15

09/07/2013

I could hear the clink clink of the ice cubes in your highball as I read your post, OP.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 1

09/06/2013

OP--a lot of us have been there. I'm not saying that to minimalize your situation, but to let you know you are not alone.

Moving on is sometimes tough, but it's a good thing.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 2

09/06/2013

Clink clink, r1. I have a spa next to the pool with a full bar. Swimsuits not required. Call me but send a picture first.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 3

09/06/2013

oh well. Cats can be wonderful company and if you die they adapt quite easily to new owners. One bowl of milk and they are hooked!

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 4

09/06/2013

Sounds like you're typing from Muumuu, Caftanistan

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 5

09/06/2013

[quote] But I thought about it. I was partnered for about ten years, had a beautiful house with room for a pony.

No sauna? How tacky.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 6

09/06/2013

[quote] Sounds like you're typing from Muumuu, Caftanistan

BINGO!!!

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 7

09/06/2013

Get up off your sorry fat ass and see what you can make of your life. Miring oneself in the boohoos is fine for a night. So fine, live it up (down?) for tonight. Go all out. Eat Cheetos and Ben & Jerry's and cheap beer, or whatever pleases you and makes your stomach feel like shit in a couple hours.

Now tomorrow, sit down and think about all the good reasons you were able to find a partner in the first place. Think of qualities, not codependent aspects. Who are you as a person? What do you have to offer a good man who will love you and treat you well? Can you at least offer love and good treatment?

Wherever you find lack in yourself, bingo - that's what you need to work on. Not by feeling sorry for yourself, but by confidently believing you can become a better you through personal effort. Enough of this bullshit 'no one will love me'. Of course you deserve love. Of course you can get love too. But you can't expect to get it if you're a/ an asshole or b/ unrealistic and will only deign to get involved with people out of your league. Be a reasonable guy who is worth being with, pursue self-improvement, and better results will follow.

P.S. It doesn't matter how much personal work you have done. Going back to an old partner pushes you back into the old ways you interacted. You two were already all you could be together (happened to me, too). You MUST go forward, and find the new, figuratively and literally.

Now stop being a sad sack and start caring about yourself.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 8

09/07/2013

room for a pony? WTF

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 9

09/07/2013

What time is it in Caftanistan?

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 10

09/07/2013

Will no one think of the pony?

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 11

09/07/2013

I think OP was self-medicating when he started this thread last night.

Feeling better about things today, OP?

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 12

09/07/2013

'Tis better to have loved and lost: Than never to have loved at all. You have no idea what real loneliness is, so shut the fuck up.

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 13

09/07/2013

[quote] room for a pony? WTF

Be gone!

by I am am and idiot and a fool and think I am better off

reply 14

09/07/2013

OP, I'm sorry for your love life. Mine sucks, too; been single for you do not WANT to know how long.

But you write well; you have a flair for words - seriously! LOVE the pony part.

Get theDL Delivered - recaps of your favorite topics delivered to your email inbox twice a week. It's easy to subscribe and even easier to unsubscribe when you want to. Give it a try! It's free so why not? (Click Here for a sample.)

Choose which channels you want to receive (uncheck all to unsubscribe)

Gossip

Entertainment

Politics

Important: Once you save your settings the first time you will receive a confirmation email. Please check your mail and click on the link in the email to complete your subscription.

No, we will not share your email address with anyone or send you spam.