Archive for the and other fun Category

It’s spring again, which means the crime in my neighborhood is about to go up.. Just last week, I said to a friend, “Wow…the weather’s really nice. I wonder how long it will take for my neighbors to turn this place into a police station.”

One week. That’s how long.

On Wednesday, I cam home to 3 Sheriff’s cruisers, uniforms everywhere, and some people who were dressed real nice but packing heat. I tried to ignore it and get ready to go for a run, but my curiosity got the better of me, so I asked another neighbor what was going on.

It turns out, one of my neighbors had died of a drug overdose about 4 days earlier, and the people on that side of the building had just started to notice an odor coming from is apartment.

It was a blast! I was there with my normal posse of the Ballas and Jenny (an honorary Balla), as well as Eric, and Holly, who was celebrating her birthday. If you’ve never been to ArtTech, basically what happens is a DJ spins records while the Apollonova artists paint paintings, which are later raffled off. While the artists paint, you walk up to them, chat them up, and buy them drinks (See, Will? I’m looking out for ya!)

The Lockview makes some of the best grilled cheese sandwiches. This is not an opinion; it is a scientifically proven fact. I sat at the bar with the birthday girl, ate grilled cheese, and drank beer. It was a lot of fun!

Me and Miss Holly, the birthday girl.

After ArtTech, we went to Thursday’s Lounge, where…a lot of weirdness happened. In fact, what happened at Thursday’s should probably stay there. I can say that I was not really a participant in the weirdness; I was an observer. So there’s that.

Anyway, ArtTech was awesome; I’m looking forward to the next one! Hopefully, we won’t have to wait another 3 months!

Tonight, admittedly under the influence of a few glasses of vodka and juice, I decided to watch The Hotel Chevalier,written and directed by Wes Anderson. Checking the Internet Movie Database’s forums, one can see that many thought that the short film The Hotel Chevalier was self-indulgent crap. I respectfully disagree. And now, I shall watch it, again, under the influence, and blog my observations via Windows Live Writer.

Meta-note: I’m drinking while watching the film, though when you read this, dear reader, I will not be drunk. I have no internet connection of my own, so I’m saving this to my computer and posting it tomorrow, which to you will be today. It’s kind of like time-travel, in that way.

Meta-note 2: Virginia Woolf, if alive today, might say: “A woman must have money and an internet connection of one’s own if she is to write a blog.” As a true feminist, I would amend “woman” to “person,” as men and women should be equal.

Meta-note 3: This will all be pretty funny once I’m sober, so save for a few fact-checking things, I shall not edit this post before posting it.

Meta-note 4: Yes; when I’m tipsy, I use phrases like “so save for a few” and “I shall not.” I was an English major for 9 years, and I tutor writing. It takes effort for me to not talk like that. It’s how I think.

Meta-note 5: The Hotel Chevalier is a short film that is on the DVD of The Darjeeling Limited. If you have never seen it, read this post, then see it (or vice-versa) and take the following comments into consideration.

Anyway…

1) The Otter will tell you that I love The Hotel Chevalier because you get to see Natalie Portman naked (well, she never takes her socks off, so nearly naked). However, I am not a huge fan of Portman, naked or otherwise, though she was awesome in The Professional.

2)The yellow color scheme is awesome and feels immediately like a Wes Anderson project. Robert Yeoman, the director of photography, was sent to earth by divinity itself in order to help Wes Anderson make movies that I would love. He has NEVER let me down. Also, though I am a pagan myself (well, a semi-practicing, non-traditional neo-pagan/chaos magician), I would like to say that Pope Benedict-whatever-number-he-is should put the guy who invented the Futura font on the fast-track to sainthood. Like, now.

3)Portman is awesome on the phone. She manages to be both menacing and teasing when she asks “Can I come there"?” (or is it “Can I cum there?” ?) , she is very unsettling. Jason Schwartzman (who, if a movie were ever made about my life, I fucking kid you not, would by my first choice to play me) really looks terrified when he realizes who he’s talking to. He sells that shit.

4) Peter Sarstedt’s “Where Do You Go to My Lovely” is the PERFECT soundtrack for this short piece. When the girlfriend (AKA Portman) asks “What’s this music,” I hate her. Hate’s a strong word, so I’ll use it. I hate her. She’s a bitch right from the start. Bitch is a strong word. You’re goddamn right it is.

5)And who the hell is she talking to on the phone as she walks in to destroy Jack’s (Schwartzman’s) life? It’s like this meeting is not important. It’s just a thing.

6)The almost-kiss-but-only-a-hug reminds me of Richie and Margot Tennenbaum in The Royal Tenenbaums. I’m 100% sure this is intentional, which begs the question, “Wes Anderson…what happened in your life that makes you write such heartbreaking scenes?”

7)Wes Anderson, every movie you make breaks my heart. Is this what you want?

8)If it is, I can live with that. Also, I relate to Richie Tenenbaum on so many levels that if I told you in person, you would probably get a restraining order against me. I wouldn’t blame you, though. I scare myself sometimes. Do not worry, however; I’m not going to attempt suicide. I’ve been there, it wasn’t good, and I’ll never be in that place again, I swear to fucking god I won’t.

9)I’m not tipsy. I am drunk.

10) This is either the greatest or worst blog post ever.

11) I just imagined myself asking my friend Jayson if I sound like a twat, so I guess that Jayson has become some sort of moral compass for me. I’m not sure how I feel about this fact, bit you da man, Jayson, and you are not a hater, despite what others may think. You da fuckin’ man.

12) tHIS IS THE GREATEST POST EVER. That was in caps lock accidentally, but you only live once, or twice, if that awesome song that has absolutely nothing to do with this film is to believed so I’ll play it as it lay.

13)Back to this movie, whatever-the-fuck-it-is.

14)Jack has constructed a little world of order in his room. His ex-girlfriend is disrupting his world by moving his stuff.

15)The music box plays “Les Champs Elysees,” which is one of the closing credits songs of The Darjeeling Limited. I bow before you, Mr. Anderson.

16) My apartment is kind of spinning, which is odd. Usually, it doesn’t move at all. It’s part of the reason I moved here, actually.

17)Although I am not a fan off Ms. Portman, the short hair is nice. And by nice, I mean hot.

18) The girlfriend takes Jack’s world that he has created and disrupts it. She even uses his toothbrush. Bitch.

I meant to post this on Sunday, but I was waiting until I could Photoshop these pictures down to a manageable size. Anyway, the otter and I took a trip to Pittsburgh this weekend to visit our friend Kurt. We spent too much money, but we had a great time.

We got to Pittsburgh on Friday night. Surprisingly, the trip there only takes about 2 hours from North Canton, so even though we didn’t leave until almost 8 PM, we still got there in time to have fun that night. We met Kurt at his apartment, then went to The Squirrel Hill Cafe, or the Squirrel Cage, as the locals call it. There, we had expensive beer and listened to some good music from their juke box.

At the Cage, we met up with a few of Kurt’s friends and made out way to a diner, the name of which escapes me right now, but I’m sure Kurt or the Otter will chime in in the comments section to remind me! The food was pretty good and very cheap; I had a grilled cheese sandwich and stuffed olive leaves, and my bill was less than $5.

The next day, we met Kurt’s friends at the Phipps Conservatory. This was really cool; they had all sorts of plants, from coffee plants to bananna trees to orchids. There was also a room with butterflies flying freely, and there were glass sculptures everywhere.

Otter vs. Ostrich: Who Will Survive?

After the conservatory, we got a bite to eat at an awesome little restaurant which, again, I can not remember the of. We then parted ways with Kurt’s friends and took a tour of the Carnegie Mellon University campus, where Kurt goes to scool and works. It’s a beautiful campus.

Next, we went the Caliban Book Shoppe, mainly to look for used books (I bought Orlando by Virginia Woolf and The Painted Bird by Jerzy Kosinski), but the most awesome thing was that I found The Mountain Goats’ The Coroner’s Gambit, Babylon Springs, Sweden, and Nine Black Poppies! My Mountain Goat CD collection is even closer to complete! BOOYA!

Um…but I digress. We also hit a few other little stores before making our way to Paul’s CDs where…I found The Mountain Goats’ Beautiful Rat Sunset and All Hail West Texas, as well as Neutral Milk Hotel’s Everything is! If I ever find tMG’s Full Force Galesburg, I’ll have all the major CD releases!!!

Ahem.

Afterwards, we went out for coffee, then went to Kurt’s friend’s house for a night of Apples to Apples, Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job, and lots of alcohol. Good times.

Before we left on Sunday, we went to Church (for Kelly…I’m unaffiliated.) and for lunch at a local pizza shop (Damn! I can’t remember any of these places’ names!) and then headed out for pur exactly 2-hour trip home! It was good to be back, but we’ll definately go visit again soon!

Saturday was my birthday, so the otter and I made one of our trips to the rubber city to celebrate.

Our first stop was VegiTerranean, the vegan restaurant owned by Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders. I had the Warm Arugula Salad with Oven Roasted Butternut Squash, Red Onion, Sun-dried Cherries and
Toasted Pecans, tossed in a warm Maple Dijon Balsamic Vinaigrette; the Italian Fritto Gardein Scallopini, and a glass of red wine. It was one of the best but most expensive meals I ever had! I’ll probably go back sometime, though I will probably have to go during lunch.

Next, we headed over to Square Records, which is pretty much the most awesome store ever. I picked up Nick Drake’s Bryter Layter, Belle and Sebastian’s Storytelling, and Dethklok’s Deathalbum, all on CD, as well as Thriller by Michael Jackson on Vinyl. I also grabbed the Trouble Books Tablature Book, which is awesome.

Next door, we went to Revival. Usually, the otter gets stuff while I stand around bored (I’m not excited about clothes shopping!), but I did find a nice cardigan. The otter bought it for me.

After working out and watching what I eat (but not starving myself), I am 1 pound away from my target weight of 155. Also, yesterday, I ran 4 miles, which is almost a mile more than I’ve ever run before.

I’ve also taken to drinking a glass of red wine a night. Supposedly, it has all sorts of health benefits. Personally, it’s probably just a reason to drink without feeling bad about it.
😛

Years since I had last been roller skating: about 14.
Times previously I had been skating in my life: 2.
Confidence I had in my skating ability: 0.
Number of times I fell down on the skating rink:…0!

Kelly and I went roller skating on Friday, and despite my apprehensions and lack of experience skating, I did alright. Actually, Kelly, who used to skate fairly often, said that I was skating as well as she was by the end of the night, and she was surprised at how fast I was taking the corners.

The kids that were out there, though….jeesh! Speed skating, going backwards, sliding on their toes…it was amazing and intimidating to watch. I felt a little old and out of place there, but overall, I did alright.

Another surprise was the music that they played. The crowd was mostly 12-14-year-olds, but the songs included “Crank Dat Soulja Boy,” “Teenagers” by My Chemical Romance (Chorus: “Teenagers scare the living shit out of me”), and some song about “Sexy Magic”. Granted, I’m not really offended, and I’m sure that these kids listen to that music anyway, I’m just surprised that the skate center would risk angering parents with uncensored versions of those songs.

Another surprise was that I am not sore after a night of skating. I guess I’m not as old as I thought I was!

All in all, we had a lot of fun, and just as we do karaoke every other Friday, I wouldn’t mind skating on the opposite Fridays!