Nothing frustrates a man more than lacking purpose. At times in my life, I would wonder why on earth I was here. Those times not only stressed me out–they became a stress to my wife and children. A man without a purpose is worse than a man without a country. God gave you a purpose when He gave you life.

A place in this world

God did not set man on a beach with glass of ice tea in His hand. When He created him, He put him in a place needing a lot of work. “And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it” (Genesis 2:15). Adam maintained the garden. He was guardian of the forest and lone ruler of all the realm.
Adam must have had both a gardener’s position and a sentry’s duty. He was to name all the animals and possibly oversee their selective breeding. If he had dominion over all the earth, he may have been the first horticulturist and zoologist. Whatever the man’s job, we know God created him with a purpose. Adam did not arrive on planet Earth so he could develop a buff body and nice tan. Just like the first man, you and I have reasons for being here.

A cure for loneliness

God did not just give Adam a wife for recreational purposes. God gave him Eve so he would not be alone in his mission. Lonely husbands should not seek companionship outside the home. You loneliness indicates you may not be fulfilling your wife’s needs. Rather than find some guys to hang with all weekend, be honest with your loneliness and accept the cure God gave you.
If your wife struggles with loneliness, you are probably too absorbed in yourself. Your job, hobbies, or friends may have stolen your heart away from the woman you should put first.

Stop marriage problems

Show me a husband who does not know his purpose in life, and I will show you an unhappy, distracted wife. She has all kinds of things she wants to pursue and probably is going off like a loose cannon because her man has given her nothing to follow. Eve showed up in the world of a man who knew his calling. Do you find yourself aggravated by your wife’s social obligations, her disinterest in your interests, or her business in everything but home? Consider whether you are leading her or just wandering.
Marriage means so much more than breakfast in bed. You will find fulfillment in your mate as you join together for a life purpose. She will be your help meet (a term God uses of His relationship toward us – Deuteronomy 33:7; Psalm 33:20). She will empower you if you let her. Give her room to voice her opinion, and she may not feel she has to force it on you.

Misunderstanding purpose

I did not understand life purpose when I first married. I thought my life goal was marriage. After banging my head against this misunderstanding for a couple of years, I realized the joy of pursuing a life calling with a supportive mate. This is the only long-term marriage therapy I know.
Show me a man who has no purpose, and I will show you a marriage that stinks.
Show me a man with a vision and a wife who refuses to join him, and I will show you a frustrated man and unhappy woman.
Show me a man who does have a life purpose but won’t let his wife be a part of it, and I will show you a marriage on the rocks.
Men often dig their own grave by offering their wife no purpose or chance to join them in their calling, so she emotionally wanders off, gets a job, and becomes help meet to another man. God didn’t give you a wife to send her off to share in some employer’s mission statement. She is bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh, joined in a cooperative calling.
Show me a man and his wife that pursue the same cause together, and I will show you a united marriage.
Pray about a ministry you can do together. Ask God to direct your steps. Join together to raise your kids (if you have been so blessed) rather than let them be discipled by a school. Don’t wait for them to be taught about God by a Sunday School teacher, you teach them. Train them up together and see your home unite.

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[…] In the home, a woman does work. She works within the expanse of her husband’s calling and their joint life purpose. They work alongside. Instead, many men today farm their wives out to be helpmeet to another man. They let her fulfill his vision. The husband has his life and the wife has hers. Often, the only thing uniting them is the children. Too many times the children are not enough to hold them together, and one leaves the other for a co-worker—a helpmeet. […]