Based on things I read on the Internet, Germans incinerate Jews and worship David Hasselhoff, so it’s unclear how they will react to the November issue of German FHM. Mostly because Jessica Alba is a Latina actress who had a kid with the black guy from Hill Street Blues‘ son. But I hope they’re okay. If you can jack off to a smokestack and a talking 1982 Pontiac Trans Am (*), I’m sure you can find it in your heart to jack off to this.