It started with 1980 and covered that decade, and you probably want to read back to see what franchises were already used. We pick up today with 1990, a year that has fond memories for me as the golden age of Zubaz and tight rolled jeans.

Buffalo Bills (1990):You draw the Bills with Jim Kelly, Thurman Thomas, Andre Reed and the K-Gun Offense. Oh, and Scott Norwood. Sorry. This makes at least four gut-punch losses in the postseason.

Detroit Lions (1991):The Magic Football kicks out Detroit. You shrug, look at Rodney Peete, but then immediately invest in “Wayne Fontes is a football genius” stock. You never know. Opening week, though, and Barry Sanders is out. The Lions lose 45-0 to the Redskins. After that, though, the Lions go on an improbable run to finish at 12-4 and the #2 seed. They beat the Cowboys in the postseason, the last team to do that until 1994. Sure, they get outclassed by Washington again in the title game, but you’ll come to thank the Magic Football. It could have been a lot worse with Detroit.

New Orleans Saints (1992) : The Dome Patrol had been one of the league’s best units for six seasons, and you draw them for what would be their last together, as Pat Swilling signed with the Lions a year later. They did not disappoint in the regular season, leading the league in fewest points allowed. The difference between hosting a wildcard game and potentially being the #1 seed was two close losses to the 49ers. The Saints continued their winless playoff streak, though, when they held a 20-7 lead early in the 3rd quarter, but the Eagles scored 29 straight, capped by Bobby Hebert’s third interception of the game.

Houston Oilers (1993): You’ve officially been in the Dome portion of the schedule. Well, at least you didn’t draw the team that blew the 35-3 lead at Buffalo. Instead, you get your second team with Buddy Ryan as defensive coordinator, and it would not disappoint. Who can forget Buddy taking a swing at Kevin Gilbride? The Oilers got off to a 1-4 start and things looked bad, but then they reeled off 11 straight. They met the Kansas City Chiefs and Magic Football nemesis Joe Montana in the playoffs, having beaten them 30-0 in the regular season. Proving that momentum means nothing, Houston lost and Keith Cash provided one of my favorite memories.

Arizona Cardinals (1994): The Magic Football loves Buddy Ryan. In 1994, the Cardinals changed their name from Phoenix to Arizona, and brought in Ryan as coach. You anticipate greatness. In the end, you just realize that the Bidwells have been bad for a long time. Arizona did win 6 of 8 to get to 8-7 with an outside shot of the playoffs, but a final game loss sealed their fate. For the first time, you have missed the postseason.

Kansas City Chiefs (1995):The second, but not the last time, that Marty Schottenheimer appears on the list. Steve Bono at QB? Yuck. But the Chiefs ride their defense to a #1 seed and a 13-3 record, where they draw heavy underdog Indianapolis on a cold day in January. In a dreadful game, the Colts had 4 fumbles but recovered all, the Chiefs turned it over 4 times, and Lin Elliott missed all three field goals, including a tying attempt.

Carolina Panthers (1996):You are still shell-shocked from the Arizona experience when the Magic Football kicks out a second year expansion team. Still, you plop down some money on the Panthers to make the playoffs at some pretty long odds. The veteran group of cast offs goes on a binge with Kerry Collins at QB, de-throning the 49ers in the West in improbable fashion. A conference championship game appearance is more than you could have hoped.

Denver Broncos (1997):Seven straight years in the 1990’s with no title, and the last Super Bowl appearance for one of your teams was the Scott Norwood game. The Broncos change that when they advance as a wildcard, but they are large underdogs because, well, the AFC hasn’t won a Super Bowl since the Raiders knocked off your Redskins in 1983. You aren’t hopeful, but John Elway gets his ring.

Minnesota Vikings (1998):When you drew the Vikings and Randy Moss fell to them in the first round, you had an inkling he might be good. The Vikings offense broke the scoring record previously set by the 1983 Redskins, and rolled to a 15-1 record. The Cardinals were no match in the Divisional Round. The Falcons were heavy underdogs in the Championship Game. Gary Anderson was 35 for 35 in the regular season on field goals. You now officially hate field goal kickers if there was any doubt after Scott Norwood and Lin Elliott.

Jacksonville Jaguars (1999): You draw the Jacksonville Jaguars in 1999, a team consistently in the playoffs the previous three years. Jacksonville manages to go undefeated against everyone but the Tennessee Titans. Unfortunately, they go 0-3 against them including a loss in the AFC title game.

The decade of the 1990’s closes out with only one Super Bowl title, two appearances, and three famous kicker misses at the end of games. Through 20 years, you only have 4 Super Bowl titles despite getting one of the best seasons from every franchise on the list. This Magic Football thing may not be such a good idea, and there’s still 12 years remaining.

Comments

This should have been up earlier, but hey! Mariano Riviera rang a bell!

http://www.sportsherniablog.com Tim Ryan

Keith Cash. Breathtaking moment.

Gary Anderson. Idiot kicker.

http://www.twitter.com/bsanders37 bsanders37

Scott Norwood had never demonstrated the ability to make a kick of that length on grass. The meme that it’s his fault the Bills lost that game needs to finally die. The ’99 Jaguars going 15-0 against the rest of the league and 0-3 against the Titans is one of the odder, overlooked stats in recent NFL history. That team would’ve given the Rams a run if they’d played another team in the AFC title game.

http://twitter.com/SouvenirCity SouvenirCity

You’re going to give this fan a Packers team with Aaron Rodgers instead of Brett Favre? This fan misses out on a lot of the good stuff.

http://twitter.com/#!/JHScramble Jim Harbaugh Scramble

This should have been up earlier, but hey! Mariano Riviera rang a bell!

Yankees get post priority, you should know that by now.

http://twitter.com/Citylife80 Ballz is The Stig

Through 20 years, you only have 4 Super Bowl titles despite getting one of the best seasons from every franchise on the list. This Magic Football thing may not be such a good idea, and there’s still 12 years remaining.

Nope. Not me! I told the Magic Football to go fuck itself and stayed a 49ers fan. 5 titles. How bad can the next decade be?…….

http://twitter.com/SouvenirCity SouvenirCity

Unless you’re throwing us a curveball and the Packers get 2007 which sees a Favre throw his last pass as a Packer for a pick… you sly dog, Lisk.

The Packers would be interesting. They’ve, in theory, underachieved just about every season since Rodgers has been QB due to their freakishly awful record in close games. If that evens out and they continue drafting well and resigning key guys early, uh oh, NFC.

http://twitter.com/SouvenirCity SouvenirCity

1996’s Packers team was fantastic. Regardless, Lisk can’t choose 2010 for them because that wasn’t one of the top 5 winning seasons over the time span chosen. Whichever Packer team he chooses, they fall short in the postseason. That ’96 team was loaded at every position.

http://www.sportsherniablog.com Tim Ryan

Scott Norwood had never demonstrated the ability to make a kick of that length on grass. The meme that it’s his fault the Bills lost that game needs to finally die.

You’re expecting far too much reason from idiot sports fans.

Also, I blame the Giants defensive linemen for stalling the Bills superbly potent offense by kicking the football around.

http://twitter.com/#!/billybuckner8 Billy Buckner

Somewhat related, but Billy Cundiff better make his first 25 FGs, because otherwise he’s going to have a rough season.

Badger

Unless you’re throwing us a curveball and the Packers get 2007 which sees a Favre throw his last pass as a Packer for a pick… you sly dog, Lisk.

My guess is 2003 with 4th and 26. Worst loss in my lifetime.

Babar 2.0

I think SuperFan only wins 1 more Super Bowl…Bucs.

/Just a guess

Badger

Actually, nevermind…I guess it would have to be 2002.

2007 has to be the Patriots.

http://espn.go.com/nba/tradeMachine YYSA

Somewhat related, but Billy Cundiff better make his first 25 FGs, because otherwise he’s going to have a rough season.

Monkey paw F8teball will grant your wish only to have him shank the important ones later.

http://www.twitter.com/bsanders37 bsanders37

I don’t even think Robert Brooks played for most of that 1996 season, did he? That team was a monster.

http://twitter.com/#!/billybuckner8 Billy Buckner

Monkey paw F8teball will grant your wish only to have him shank the important ones later.

Probably true. Fuck.

http://twitter.com/SouvenirCity SouvenirCity

Patriots could get 2003. 13-3 Super Bowl champs. Though that’s got a strong chance of being the Colts’ year.

http://twitter.com/mantis915 phillymantis915

My guess is 2003 with 4th and 26. Worst loss in my lifetime.

Fredex delivers!

http://spartyandfriends.com/ mizerle06 is sarah phillips

Jacksonville manages to go undefeated against everyone but the Tennessee Titans. Unfortunately, they go 0-3 against them including a loss in the AFC title game.

suck it, Jags.

Babar 2.0

Patriots could get 2003. 13-3 Super Bowl champs. Though that’s got a strong chance of being the Colts’ year.

Only takes into account regular season…has to be 16-0.

http://www.twitter.com/bsanders37 bsanders37

So many Colts teams from the 2000’s to choose from. I’m hoping for 2005. Loved that team, except for Mike Doss and Nick Harper’s wife and internal navigation system.

http://www.sportsherniablog.com Tim Ryan

Only takes into account regular season…has to be 16-0.

It’s a shame they fell short of perfection. A damn shame.

arkbadger

Minnesota Vikings (1998):

I’m not really one to wish injury on people, but I kind of wish Gary Anderson would get a severe case of gout.