Cold Medicine For Your Oversharing Sick Friend

When you get sick, you know how to power through and beat it. But when your friend gets sick, they won’t shut up about every disgusting detail. Do you really need to hear about how much mucus they’re swallowing and then later vomiting back out? No, of course not. Just reading that sentence was disturbing enough. To be honest, writing it was difficult too.

Finally there’s a new, completely real medicine called TMI, which you can force your friend to take and get them to shut up for good. After completely numbing their entire insides (after all, that’s what they’ve been complaining about) TMI finds neuro-inhibitors in your friend’s brain and any time they start to talk about their cold again, forces them to talk instead about one of two topics everyone loves: bacon, and Tom Hanks.

Looks like this isn’t FDA approved (or real at all) but it’s pretty incredible technology, so these things take time.

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