My kid is an arsehole. Not that I would call him that to his face, to his face I call him Butthead.

I still have some AWESOME guest posters up my sleeve {remember if you want a piece of the MB2 action email me a post, a margarita and your credit card details} but I thought I would dip my toes back into the world of more than 140 characters at a time… HUZZAH!

Boo was being a turd.

Yelling and screaming and going all OCD on my arse while I as trying to watch a program about medicinal marijuana as a treatment for OCD and anxiety as a treatment for Autism.

Irony, I am your bitch.

Once the program was over, well I ASSUME it was over cause by this stage he had turned on and off the TV four times and open and closed the door four times while running around the room wrapped in a used-to-be-before-it-was-used-as-soft-toilet-paper white blanket and was doing that high pitched squeal that dislodges any wax remaining in your ear or explodes your brain, I sat him down and told him that this is bullshit.

Well NOT TECHNICALLY.

TECHNICALLY I calmly explained to him that this behaviour is unacceptable and that if he is feeling overwhelmed he needs to use his words OMG SNORE… you get the gist. I am a fucking awesome mother even if I call my kid an arsehole in my head.

And he was all meh.

So I tried a different approach. I told him that today *I* would be Boo.

If he was watching something on TV, I would turn it off.

If he was eating, I would take it away.

If he was enjoying doing something on his computer I would turn it off.

Rewrite the list on your own pretty paper but label it Boo’s chore list and hand it back to him. It might just earn you a few minutes peace and quiet.
Aaargh! I’ve just dribbled hot pizza sauce on my clean pj’s!

I have to commend you for the farting technique, it is the only thing keeping my marriage stable… a threat to fart on a pillow is easily the best way to win a debate over whether we’re having maccas or KFC for dinner.

fuck. this is amazing. best note ever! I have a huge soft spot in my heart for kids with Autism. I used to work with them a lot when I was a special needs teacher aide, and they never failed to surprise me each and every day with their unique logic. My brother has Asperger’s and I seriously find him fascinating. Makes me wonder what would have happened if I ever finished my psychology degree and worked in Autism research, like I wanted. I could have a stack of chore lists by now 🙂