Family and Consumer Sciences

College of Agriculture and Natural Resources

Self-Teaching Module for Parents

Horizons forParent Involvementin Children’s Learningin Home and School Settings

The following information is specifically designed for parents and family members interested in enhancing their child's learning and the effectiveness of their child's school.

Project designed by Ben Silliman, University of Wyoming Family Life Specialist, in conjunction with and funded by the Parent Education Network of Wyoming.

Parent Involvement in Children’s Learning

Parents as first teachers

Family members are the first and most important influences on the learning of children at all ages. While parents are usually the strongest models and have the greatest impact, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and family friends also can act as role models, aides, and encouragers. These influences often shape input from peers, neighbors, teachers, and others.

Important aspects of family leaders:

Parenting: Provide a blend of caring and discipline to foster confidence and capability appropriate to each child's unique personality and developmental stage

Communication: Maintain consistent and positive relationships with teachers and other mentors to increase awareness of school and community activities

Volunteering: Involvement in school and community organizations

Learning: Provide a stimulating and thoughtful environment for a child's growth and development and success in school

Decision-making: Active participation in leadership in school and community groups

Collaborating with the community: Involvement through neighborhood and community (human, information, facilities, policies)

This Web site focuses primarily upon roles of parenting and learning at home, including:

Modeling: Introduce and share learning activities, reading aloud together, and learn new things at home and work

Unrealistic or unrelenting pressure to perform or personalized criticism for failure can damage motivation and self-esteem. However, great challenges, together with great encouragement can enable a child to reach un-dreamed-of accomplishments and build confidence.

Some ways of building high aspirations:

Model the learning of new skills, including activities with the child

Monitor the child’s personal behavior and peer relations for honestly, compassion, responsibility, and hard work

Monitor school performance for consistency, effort, imagination, and critical thinking—remember that "learning to think" and "trying to apply" are more important than all A’s

Support extracurricular efforts which interest, inspire, or energize the child. Fixing cars or computers may tell more about learning potential than making the honor roll. Excelling at karate, piano, or debate may balance efforts in academic success.

Introduce new activities, people, places, and events in which the child can interact as well as observe. A retirement home may do as well as a museum, a disabled child can teach more than a senator or astronaut—the variety of experiences and challenges counts.

Introduce the child to older peer and adult role models and mentors.

Discuss and explore higher education and career options. Motivation and achievement will open doors to financing dreams if parents allow dreams to flourish.

Communicating

Good Listening Skills

Interest and attentiveness—eye contact and responsiveness (can be just "uh-huh" but can’t be ignoring or criticizing).

Show interest in children’s ideas, feelings, activities on a consistent basis. Take on an attitude of acceptance rather than judgment.

Avoid dead-end questions which focus on yes/no or right/wrong answers. Ask for description, examples, reactions, and new ideas which come from an experience.

Extend conversations by restating an important feeling, probing an interesting idea, or asking a "what if" question. Focus on the child’s answer rather than the subject itself to avoid getting too caught up in your own opinions.

Share your own thoughts and dilemmas and involve the child in problem solving on simple things such as where to place furniture or how to fix a recipe.

Observe signs that the child wants to end a conversation: staring into space, giving silly responses, several requests for repeating your comments which indicate that attention is waning.

Reflect feelings by restating or rephrasing words or attitudes which indicate emotions

Source: ACCESS ERIC: How can parents model good listening skills?

Strategies for Building Cooperation

Describe the problem. Observations are often more insightful than advice or criticism.

Give information. Facts or reminders enable responsibility rather than resistance.

Offer a choice. Participation in decision-making or consequences increases motivation.

Say it with a word or gesture. Lecturing or explaining often impede cooperation.

Put it in writing. A note is often clearer and less threatening than face-to-face contact.

Be playful. Humor, spontaneity, and fun spice up difficult or disagreeable work.

Preschool: Exploration and fantasy shape discovery of self, others, and the world. Freedom to explore and lessons in responsibility help balance development

Childhood: Observation, experimentation, and practical skill-building cultivate a widening understanding of the
world and how it works. Mastering practical skills, teamwork, and adult mentoring build confidence

Establish a daily family routine including… time, space, quiet, and materials for studying, reading, and hobbies assigned chores and shared tasks health habits of rest, activity, regular meals, and hygiene shared meals and special meal celebrations (holidays, picnics) regular bedtimes, with slowing down and getting ready activities self-regulated time management with limits and balance to activities

Monitoring out-of-school activities, maximizing learning opportunities… guide leisure time for constructive out-of-school activities set clear rules and standards about appropriate activities set limits on television, video, or computer/Internet time

Model the value of learning and hard work through… reading, writing, and engaging in other learning activities at home use family leisure for planning, discussing/debating, challenging games, learning and cooperative activities, questioning and improving involving children in the hard work of household projects and family activities use reference materials and Internet sources to solve problems Volunteer to help in school or community projects

Express high but realistic expectations for achievement by… setting goals and standards appropriate to age and maturity encourage and assist hard work and persistence toward long-term gains affirm special talents and potential to learn praise achievement by noting accomplishments which led to it

Encourage child’s development and progress in school via… warm and supportive home environment applying rewards, sanctions, and guidance appropriate to circumstances decorate the refrigerator with symbols of success ask teachers for home learning activities and homework

Reading, writing, and discussions among family members addressing… reading aloud at a regular time plus listening to children read Discussing current and family events, creating stories and scrapbooks Telling stories including humor, character models, and problem solving Writing letters, messages, grocery lists, and diaries

When a child is organized and trying hard but still not succeeding, check into additional teacher help or private tutoring

Be sure to praise hard work, progress, and success. Often, just an observation about the child’s sense of responsibility, learning accomplishments, neatness or organization communicates esteem and encourages self-direction and reward

Be tolerant of imperfection—learning more often comes from mistake or failure

Local people and places. Personal experience, suggestions from teachers and librarians, other parents’ ideas, and the Yellow Pages can open the door to a wealth of support and learning resources in your own or nearby communities. Places to check include:

Teachers

Professionals and professional groups (i.e. doctors and lawyers)

Public agency professionals

Internet sites

Specialized businesses

Librarians

Advocacy groups

4-H or Scout project leaders

Youth Club leaders

Grandparents

Neighbors

Tradespersons (i.e. plumbers and electricians)

Museums

Government publications. The U.S. Department of Education has produced many inexpensive and helpful documents available through Consumer Information Catalog, Pueblo, CO 81009:

Computer resources. Dictionaries, encyclopedias, and outlines of almost any topic can be found on the Internet. Search engines such as Yahoo or InfoSeek allow for location of specialized information in seconds. In addition, software programs on math, science, geography, history, finances, and writing provide tools for informal learning or organizing school projects. A school or library teacher or computer consultant can suggest resources or demonstrate "how to" for a parent or child.

Web sites that help parents find information about involvement in schools and learning:

National Parent-Teacher Association. PTA has a wealth of information on many phases of growth and learning, parent involvement, and school or community projects to promote learning on an individual and community level. www.pta.org

Staying in Touch with Teachers

Reading messages, announcements, report cards

Communicating with teachers regularly

Taking part in classroom and school events

Effective Relationships between Parents and Teachers

Make contact as early as possible. Get acquainted and show interest.

Communicate information about the child’s interests, habits, abilities, and difficulties

Contact teacher if you notice big changes in the child’s attitude or behavior.

Get involved as a classroom volunteer, assisting with classroom or field trip tasks (organizing, refreshments, demonstrating or leading events), preparing materials or displays at home, or supporting school events (registrar, usher, fund-raiser, coach, board member, or backstage at an event).

Getting the Most from Parent-Teacher Conferences

Be prepared to listen as well as talk. Jot down questions and comments beforehand and be ready to take notes and ask questions from the teacher’s comments.

Listen for specific details about a child’s behavior or performance. Check on standards and rules for evaluating children.

Discuss your child’s talents, skills, hobbies, study habits, and any special sensitivities, such as weight or speech difficulties.

Indicate needs for special help or special circumstances such as addition of a new baby, illness, or an upcoming move that might impact ability to learn.

Ask about specific ways to help the child at home.

Think about the teacher’s comments when you return home and discuss them with your child (i.e., set new homework rules, bedtimes, weekend activities).

Participation in formal and informal requests to identify parent interests, talents, and availability provides practical assistance to schools and organizations and powerful role model for other parents and children. Volunteering at school can include: