AIBU to expect newborn congratulatory card/gift from SIL?

So, DS is a couple of months old now and has not received so much as a bloody card from his aunt & uncle. AIBU to feel totally pissed off by this? They don't ever ask about him, how he's getting on,absolutely nothing. When we're in their company they only talk about themselves and their pregnancy. It infruriates me, it's like they aren't willing to acknowledge their nephew. Their DD is due next month and I will make a fuss of baby even though my son hasn't received the same from them, I'm not petty. How should I treat our relationship with in laws if things don't improve when their DD is born? I can't stand by and let my son be ignored.

YANBU. It's rude tbh. I bet they will expect attention for their baby when it's born.

When we had my first, SIL and her DH came and visited. Moaned about their landlord (trivial stuff) after we had just been evicted whilst I was pregnant and was living in a crappy 1 bedroom flat as it's all we could afford. They stayed an hour, talked about themselves, bought a pack of vests which I thought was a slightly odd gift as everyone and his dog bought an outfit. Then we had DC2, they didn't visit at all, didn't buy anything, I don't even remember getting a card. We saw them at MILs over a month after DD was born. BIL held DD, SIL was sat next to him looking at a magazine, BIL said "do you want to hold the baby", she looked over, went "nah" and went back to her magazine. That's was the most attention she paid her.

She is now pregnant and I will be showing her the same courtesy she has shown my children. Mine are 8 and 5 and the 5 year old doesn't even know who she is. The 8 year old barely remembers her. They didn't even know she was their aunt until I mentioned it recently.

Some families are shit and are all about themselves. I always think a lot of others so like the same consideration back. If I don't get it they can sod off.

People can be so odd - I always acknowledge and give cards for birth and then birthday cards after (for nieces and nephews). But i have 3 kids myself and their birthdays are barely acknowledged.

My youngest is almost two and 2 of his cousins have birthdays earlier within the same week - last year i sent both these nephews a card but neither set of parents remembered my son on his first birthday. This year I'll send cards again but i won't expect anything in return - your child doesn't know he's being overlooked and its nice to be nice. I think a lot if people are very self absorbed and its not worth getting cross about it (tho i totally understand why you would be).

Hmm, no one has said it yet so ill be the first- is it possible they had/ are having fertility problems when you had your babies? I know its not an excuse to be downright rude buy could be why they kept their distance?

My sister had a miscarriage and is struggling to conceive, she doesn't talk about it but I know its the reason she is distant with my dd. And I dont expect too much of her either.

I was due my first baby at same time as my brother was expecting his but I had an early miscarriage. When their baby was born I was happily pregnant again but I found it hard to deal with them. I didn't realise at the time but once my hormonal fog lifted months later I could see how unhelpful I had been and how I tried to avoid holding the baby etc. They knew about my miscarriage and I assume they understood that it was a difficult time for me. Could your SIL be in a similar situation?Also if they are first time parents they might just be too caught up in their own adventure to enjoy yours.