Ken’s last book finished just before he died. He introduces EMDR, Harville Hendrix, Ron Kurtz’s Hakomi and other therapies as much faster ways of getting rid of addictions than using his classic methods.

Online bookstores carrying Your Road Map to Lifelong Happiness: A Guide to the Life You Want

Behind all of our thoughts, feelings and actions, we always have beneficial
intentions (even though we may sometimes use
unskillful ways to achieve them).

You really have to read several of Ken’s books to properly understand what these
principles mean. I will give you a couple of examples from my own life of their
application.

In 1975 my lover suddenly dumped me and refused any further
communication. I went into an emotional tailspin and pined for him for 12 years. What was really causing my suffering? Him leaving or me refusing
to let go of the past? The first wisdom principle reminds me that I am
the author of that pain, not my ex. To get rid of the pain, the most efficient way is to
change my head rather than to persuade him to come back. Even if I had persuaded him to
come back, I would still have tortured myself with thoughts of losing him again. Either
way, to get rid of the suffering, I had to get rid of my addiction to him.

In 1993 a couple of embezzlers wiped me out financially. I
lost my business and all my savings. I ceaselessly obsessed about it. I felt so betrayed
by my two friends. How they must have hated me to do such a thing. I started thinking
that I must have been a really rotten boss for them to have sought such revenge. When I
discovered their true motives, I was able to stop that poisonous churning. One was
stealing to buy expensive gifts for his wife. The day the gifts stopped she left him. The
other was an alcoholic. Alcoholics will even steal from their parents to get the booze
that blocks the pain of their existence. The second wisdom principle
reminds me, that even when a motive for some unpleasant act is not clear, it is
always for something beneficial such as to feel loved, or to feel
comfortable.

Recognising your own positive intentions can
be useful too. For example I might find myself eating food when I was not even hungry, or
I might find myself furious over some employees embezzling my life savings. I would look
for my positive intention and formulate it in canonical form:

I might discover that my positive intention
for both those situations situation is to feel calm. Now I can look for alternate, more
skillful ways of achieving that same positive intention. I might take a bath. I might put
on some calming music. I might go for a short walk in the trees. These activities are
quite far removed from food, embezzling, money and the revenge fantasies I imagined I
would need to feel calm.

Informally known as The Methods Book gets down to the brass tacks. All the various exercises you can use to help get rid of addictions. It contains some template pages you could use to create a Getting Free Book diary.

Greyed out stores probably do not have the item in stock. Try looking for it with a bookfinder.

Ken does his deepest discussion of positive intentions in
Gathering Power Through Insight and Love.

If we could read the secret history of our enemies we shall find in each man’s
sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.
~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow(born:1807-02-27 died:1882-03-24 at age:75)

If you can identify the emotional state you are aiming for with some action or
addiction, you can seek some other easier way to attain that same emotional state. If you
can identify the emotional state someone else is aiming for, likewise you can offer them
more skillful ways of attaining it. In any case, you will become more understanding and
forgiving. Identifying your own positive intention is the second step in the Choice Process. Identifying someone else’s positive
intention is the first step in the Conscious
Confrontation process.

Don’t confuse positive intention with the desired outcome. Intentions are
internal emotional states. Make sure you find your positive intention somewhere in the
list below. If it is not in the list, it is likely not a positive intention.

Positive Intentions

acceptable

accepted

accepting

acknowledged

alive

appreciated

attractive

beautiful

calm

capable

comfortable

competent

complete

confident

dependable

energetic

enthusiastic

excited

Positive Intentions

experienced

fulfilled

fun-loving

genuine

happy

healthy

helpful

humorous

important

independent

intelligent

joyful

knowledgeable

lovable

loved

loving

nurtured

nurturing

Positive Intentions

peaceful

prosperous

relaxed

reliable

responsible

responsive

safe

satisfied

secure

sexual

sexy

strong

supported

supportive

valuable

valued

worthy

worthwhile

In my own case, some of my most common desired beneficial positive intentions are to
feel lovable and to see myself as sexually appealing. When my lover dumped me in
1974 I erroneously believed that because he no longer loved me
and because he no longer found me sexually appealing, I was unlovable
and sexually unappealing. After all, who knew me better than him? The key was to learn to
get this reassurance from other people who did love me and who did find me sexually
appealing.