Re: Introduce Yourself Here

Hey my name is Mike im 20 and a college student in Baltimore and to be honest i have not been single since i was 15. I was dating a girl all through high school and when it came time for college we split up because the long distance thing wasn't for us.

I have been out of the game pretty much since its started lol so im more or less a beginner to the whole scene.

Im currently reading The Game ( recommended by a friend) and im starting to feel pretty damn good at implementing these PUA strategies. I believe this community has a lot of information about picking up women that i missed out on so im happy to be a part of it

Re: Introduce Yourself Here

Hey, I'm Szabo

I'm 21 and I'm a music student beginning my opera training in the UK. I'm confident and outgoing, as well as being good looking.

I'm trying to improve my game now, as I think I'm ready. I've spent the last couple of years turning my life around. I can be honest here because it's the internet, right? I'll try and keep it short...

I had a very unhappy childhood, getting unhappier when, due to my musical talents, I was persuaded, or at least my mum was persuaded, that I audition for the local cathedral choir. It was a full-time job singing in the choir, and as a payment, the child received a huge scholarship at a prestigious private school which was mixed, it was only the choir house that was just boys. It was all full-boarding. I rarely got to see my parents, due to the business of my schedule, with whom I had a very close relationship, even though they lived in the same city. I hated it and cried every night for two years because I missed my parents (I am an only child). As a result of my innate sensitivity and artistic nature, I was picked on. It could have been worse, I wasn't physically abused or anything, but people used to dig at me all the time and I didn't know how to take it. This then turned into very severe exclusion and scape-goating. As you can imagine I had absolutely zero confidence growing up. I had clinical depression as a child, I know that now, but there was nobody I could talk to about how I felt, and I just felt stupid and worthless the whole time. I was slow at everything, because I was always so sad, something which people used to laugh at me even more for, including the teachers. I didn't even know what depression was, so I couldn't express myself. I often thought of killing myself and ending it all, and how nice it would be just to not exist. I often thought of my own funeral, and how sorry everyone would be once I was dead.

This went on for 5 years, but in my last two years I got kind of happier with the whole situation. Puberty was kicking in and I wanted to spend less and less time with my parents anyway. It was kind of fun being around and living with a bunch of boys all the same age, as we'd have a good laugh, even if it was often at my expense. I felt more a part of something but never properly as I still had no confidence. I was teased very badly due to my early outbreak of spots, and my glasses, and the fact that I was really very short for my age. I still felt bad, just not about everything. I guess I'd started to grow thicker skin.

When I'd finished my 5 years in the choir school, my parents relocated to another city two hours away, due to my mum's very specific field of expertise, just when I was 13, at the most sensitive age. I missed all my old friends and my old school so much, even if I was bullied. The people in the new school were very unfriendly and I knew I'd have to make a real effort to get to know them. I didn't want to, I just wanted to leave. I didn't have enough confidence to assert myself or establish social status and they soon cottoned-on to the fact that I had set myself up to be teased, probably due to my general demeanour or years of rejection, and they did so relentlessly. I still had no idea how to handle it, and it really affected me. They excluded me from everything, bullied me for my spots, glasses, and height, and I quickly descended into REAL feelings of self hate. I started to think suicidal thoughts, and within just a few months, they were consuming me, to the point where I could think of nothing else but how worthless I was and how much I wanted to die. I was even slower than I had ever been, and my academic work suffered massively, like it had done all my life, due to depression. I could not concentrate on anything and just walked around in a cloud of my own gloom. No one wanted to be around me, and I often sat on my own to eat lunch, or just didn't go. It was horrible, just like what had happened to me in choir school, just on a bigger level.

This suicidal depression lasted another two years at least, and one day I realised I couldn't carry on like this. I started to stuff about body-languge and acting alpha, and how to assert myself and hold myself in conversation. I actually had a very good sense of humour and could be very charming, especially with people's mums, and by the time I was 15 I was starting to get some female attention. I had left behind all of my school friends and gone out with this one guy from school who had friends out of school. They were wasters and smoked weed and drank, although most of them achieved good grades at school. I used to smoke weed with them occasionally, but I didn't really know how to inhale, so I just pretended. I still got fairly high though because some would inevitably go in. These guys and girls made me feel more welcome than I had ever been but I still never felt part of it as I still had zero confidence. I developed my own dress-sense and was able to attract girls through peacocking although I never had sex until I was 17. I just used to kiss close them, and maybe do a bit of 2nd base. I was way too self-concious to do anything more.

Then I abandoned that group because I felt I had learnt all I could from them, plus I didn't really like them, I just wanted to have friends and look cool.

I started hanging out with people at school more (although rarely outside of school hours). I was never accepted into this group, and I was still depressed, I was just out of the worst of it. I involved myself heavily in the musical life of the school and this helped me to escape from the pain of all of my life, as it did all throughout my earlier childhood, and still does today, although I am happy to say I am so very content with my life now, and am a popular and confident person.

I met a girl at 16 while doing a production of 'Jesus Christ Superstar' in which I played the role of Simon Zealotes. She was two years younger than me and I was such an AFC I was totally enamoured. She wasn't right for me and we totally didn't get on, but I just wanted to get laid. It took nearly a year of a seriously sh1t relationship to even dip the head into her. We did loads of oral secks though, so I became very good at that. I became obsessed with her, in an unhealthy way. I'd always stalk her facebook profile and fap to her and it was just really not right at all. This was the point where I forgot who I was. Because I still had no confidence I would snap at her without realising it, and she suggested I had bipolar disorder and should see a psychiatrist. I saw a psychiatrist and she said I didn't have bipolar, or at least, not yet, and that I was experiencing 'depersonalisation' with low mood, which is when you always feel like you are looking at yourself from above, as if detached from the reality of life entirely. You are unable to concentrate on anything, are constantly extremely anxious, and lose both short term and long term memory. It was so bad I would forget what someone would say to me moments after they had said it, and would have to reply with a non-sequiteur. I was really farking scared, even more scared than I had been when I was depressed. I was so on edge, I thought I was going to explode or do something seriously bad, as I felt I had no control. This was the first time I had every sought help. Ever. From anyone. The psychiatrist put me on SSRIs (Selective Seratonin Re-uptake Inhibitors), and type of antidepressant, which in turn made me lose my ability to get a hard on. It was traumatic. I didn't know it was the antidepressants, I just thought it was me, and I felt like less of a man than I ever had. I had never even come in my girlfriend, after a year-long relationsh1t. We ended it on the phone one day after another one of our ridiculous arguments (every conversation was an argument). I suggested we should break up, what little human being there was left in me knew I needed to, in order to survive, otherwise I would have jumped off a cliff. We never spoke again.

Somehow, I have no idea how, I managed to get my A levels, achieving grades which I was by no means happy with, and didn't reflect my ability, but still was accepted on my first choice course for music, which was one of the best music courses in the country. I was happy, and had no idea how I had managed to do it, since I had no recollection of anything do to my continuing depersonalisation which had by this point lasted just over a year.

It was back to the drawing board. I didn't want girls, I just wanted to get my life back on track. I took a gap year, and went to Budapest, where I reacquainted myself with my roots, my mother being Hungarian. I spoke Hungarian very well as a child, but then stopped as a teenager due to hating my mum because she couldn't see I was depressed. It was still all in my head, and I was speaking like a native again in no time. I was happy to be away from it all, in another country, staying with my godmother, and working on a (very) casual basis, unpaid, in a school and in the Opera. It was nice to be thinking in my original mother-tongue which I had almost forgotten I had, and I spent 6 months reading sh1t loads of philosophy and contemplating the meaning of life. I also did a bit of composition, and got lessons from a singer in the opera house who helped me improve my operatic technique.

I went travelling with some of my old mates from school that summer, after a few months working in England again. It was a European inter-rail trip but I felt disconnected from them and we all teased each other relentlessly (as guys do) but it often went to far, and I found it too intense. I went to my doctor and went back on the SSRIs which gave me the same side-effects again, and so tried a different sort, but then just went off them completely as this was no life and I thought I could handle it form here. I knew what I had to do.

University started and I continued trying to change myself into an alpha male. It was sort of working, as I genuinely did not give a flying fark about what anyone thought of me, and was just myself. People respected that, and I became popular. I had a good year, with minimal girls, despite many IOIs, as I was still trying to sort my head out but feeling much much happier, in fact, happy, about my life and where it was heading.

To this day I have only farked 8 girls and if I'm honest I have never had a decent shag. I have never come inside a girl. I feel this partly due to my past problems but I can honestly say that I am fully confident in who I am and my abilities now. I have come out of the biggest hole you can ever get into, so I should have no problem getting into a small one! I am changing myself, and am finally ready to embark on my journey of game, and let my true self shine. I am talented and good-looking (ugly duckling, beautiful swan?), an 8.5 on the attractiveness scale so I'm told, I work out and have many hobbies and a busy social life. I love my life. I really do. Now it's time to get some more girls and not be so AFC about this aspect of my life that I have neglected for the aforementioned reasons.

I plan to post on these forums every now and then to start with, and am happy to be a part of this community that helps people to stop being puss1es about things and just get on with it. If I had never got on with things, I would not be here to day.

Re: Introduce Yourself Here

Hey guys,

I'm new here and this is my obligatory first post. I have been reading the forums for the past week and I am pleased with what I have seen so far. I am excited to join and hope to contribute back someday.

Re: Introduce Yourself Here

hey, im lovelegend
im 18 years, in highschool
name is daniel, i started learning about this for about a year. i red many many books about it and i really love it. i live in australia and i would like a wingman.