Dec 30, 2011

My Best Confessions of 2011

Here are my best confessions of 2011. I had fun going back and reading all my old confessions from the year. It's a good snap shot at the week. Plus, it's pretty funny to read some of the things my kids did or said.

I confess....

Yesterday Mark head butted me teeth first. I thought he broke my nose at first. I now have a lovely bump on my nose and two little teeth marks. Parenthood is dangerous

I confess....
I feel like tell people that I'm tired is like telling people I'm white. Why say something so obvious?

I confess....
I went to Albertsons this morning to pick up some cheese and get a Starbucks by myself!!! I might have taken my sweet time and wandered up and down the each row even though I only needed two things. And then I might have taken the long way home just to prolong my trip. And I timed it perfectly because it was nap time when I returned.

I confess....
We took all the kids to Home Depot on Wednesday to buy a tool that was lost by one of Brett's former employees. Why did we take them instead of Brett running out by himself? Because the house was clean from being gone all morning and we wanted to keep it that way. So we might have taken our time so we got home minutes before dinner and the house stayed clean ALL DAY! No toys to pick up at the end of the day! Heaven like.

I confess....
The sound of the entire bag of Lego's hitting my wood floor is like nails on a chalk board.

I confess....
Don't you think we should all just agree on a sarcasm font so I don't have to tell you when I'm being sarcastic? That would make my life much easier.

I confess....
Yes, I brought my pizza cutter to McDonald's so cutting up their cheeseburgers was faster. And I wonder if you think that makes me weird or a genius.

I confess....
My kids are watching Sesame Street right now so I can write this post.

I confess....
I feel just a little guilty when I ask "who wants a snack?" in the morning and my kids run to the kitchen mat and sit down. In the afternoon, they run for their chairs. Yes I feed them their morning snack on the floor and never the afternoon snack. I cannot explain how this happened but it did. And my little monkeys are well trained.

I confess....
My husband outs people. It makes me crazy that I tell him things that no one else knows and then he opens his big mouth!!!! Ugh! He's announced a few pregnancies for people and divorces. (He just said in my defense.......)

I confess....
I send my kids outside right after breakfast in their pj's. They get soaked and I don't want to have to change their clothes. When they go out in the afternoon, we usually bring them in and give them a bath early. It just makes sense not to go through another outfit.

I confess....
Yesterday I bought a $50 jacket for Isabella. But don't worry, I totally justified it. First it's a fleece jacket and an outer jacket in one that zips together. So it's really two things for $50. Second it was originally $75 so I got it on sale right? Three she's in an outdoor preschool so she needs layers. Four Molly can wear it one day. And finally five I earned gymbucks so I'll get 50% off my next purchase.

I confess....

I think the employees at Gymboree wish I hadn't decided to buy it. Why? Because I went back into the store to get it with Brett and all the kids. And just as I was paying for the jacket, Isabella fell and bit her tongue. It scared her so much that she peed all over the floor. I looked over and saw blood running down her chin while she peed all over the floor. Oh yeah, it was a full bladder pee.

I confess....
When asked "how are you doing" I almost always say fine.

I confess....
I wonder if people know that I mean I'm F.I.N.E.FrazzledImpatientNuttyExhausted
Well I guess they do now.

I confess....
I'm going to give my kids all the pictures of them being naughty when they are parents. That way they'll know where their kids get it from.

I confess....
All of my kids are awake right now instead of taking naps. Not cool kids, not cool.
I confess....
Yesterday Isabella's teacher asked me if we were going to be at school on Tuesday. It's a normal question since it is a holiday week. And what was my response? Is today Thursday? Really Allison, you couldn't have kept the fact that you didn't know what day it was to yourself?

I confess....
I don't want to be a mom today. I'm tired and crampy and I'd really like to stay in bed since the weather is crummy today.

I confess....
It's days like today that I get really annoyed when celebrities say they are normal parents just like us regular folks. I don't have a full time nanny, chef, personal trainer, or personal assistant do you? If I were a celebrity I could be in bed right now because there would be someone to step in and take my place.

I confess....
I wonder what my neighbors think of my policy of "you can only scream outside?" Whenever the kids mainly Isabella starts screaming (you know the I'm having fun scream that makes parents nuts?) I send her outside to scream.

I confess....
Screaming isn't much of a problem after I made her go outside and scream. She needs an outlet for screaming and I gave her one. Problem for me-solved. Problem for my neighbors-created.

I confess....
I really want some chili cheese fries right now. I need to find the courage to just say no.

3 comments:

So cute Allison! The whole cheeseburger thing is weird but in a genius way. In your hubby's defense, he probably doesn't know any better. So don't tell him until the news has broken! Imagine those people who were getting divorced!