Heard Around the West

NORTH CASCADES NATIONAL PARK - MARBLEMOUNT, WASHINGTON - I
thought the sign said this was a private campground ..

GREG GORDON

MONTANA

Let’s get this straight: Was a unicorn behind the
wheel of a truck that crashed in Billings? A deputy
prosecutor told a judge that story in all seriousness, asking for a
high bond because he thought the driver had claimed a unicorn was
driving. But the prosecutor misunderstood a colleague’s
e-mail using the term “unicorn defense” — legal
slang for a defendant blaming anybody but himself for an accident,
reports the Associated Press. In this case, the driver, Philip
Holliday Jr., told police that “an unnamed woman” was
driving when his truck hit a light pole. Holliday has serious
problems, said the county attorney, but hanging out with reckless
unicorns is not one of them.

THE
WEST

It’s no secret that riding
in the back of a pickup isn’t safe, but it sure seems like
fun to dogs. They brace their four legs and stand proud,
noses sniffing air redolent of roadkill, and whenever a truck
corners, there’s a little sideways slide to enjoy. Border
collies seem most at home traveling in the open air, maybe because
they get to sit on the very top of bales of hay. But for a
Democratic legislator in Colorado, dog abuse can be defined as
allowing unrestrained canines to ride in truck beds. Her bill to
ban the practice provoked a flurry of letters to several
newspapers, but then seemed to go nowhere fast. Meanwhile, in
Arizona, a bill banning children from truck beds — unless all
the seats in the cab are filled — also went down, and not for
the first time. Bills banning kids from truck beds have been
introduced in Arizona for more than 20 years, and each time
they’ve been defeated, reports AZCentral.com. We can see the
bumper sticker now: Truck Beds, The Last Bastion of Freedom.

IDAHO

If
you consult the handy little Idaho Legislative
Directory and call the number listed for the Legislative
Information Center, get ready for a surprise, says
NewWest.com. “You’ll get a cheery female voice asking
you to consider what Jesus Christ has done on your behalf, and if
you’re ready to meet God and other existential
questions.” The headline on Jill Kuraitis’ story offers
the right number by noting: “Jesus’ phone number is not
332-1000.” That inspired a reader to complain, “I gave
myself to Jesus, and now he never calls.”

NEVADA

The Stardust
Hotel-Casino on the Las Vegas strip bit the dust in 10 seconds on
March 13, the 2:30 a.m. demolition timed to meet few
crowds and little traffic. It will be replaced by a $4 billion
5,300-room complex called Echelon. The Stardust was only
middle-aged — 48 — but that’s ancient by Las
Vegas standards, reports the New York Times. The resort leaves at
least one mourner, 23-year-old Joel Rosales, whose Web site,
LeavingLV.net, pays tribute to such demolished properties,
including the Dunes, Hacienda, and the Sands. “I am
disappointed that we as a city have no sense of preserving our past
and heritage,” he said, “no matter how tacky or
out-of-date it might be.”

WASHINGTON

Commuters to
Seattle have it rough, and it’s getting rougher.
That was never more obvious than this winter, when University of
Washington administrators found that snowplow operators
couldn’t get in to do their jobs. “The next time snow
was forecast, the university put them up in hotels.” The
Seattle Post-Intelligencer offered statistics that reveal the
conundrum: In 2006, “the typical Seattle family of four
earned $74,300 — about $30,000 less than the income needed to
afford the typical home sold that year.” The result: Just 49
percent of the people who work in Seattle live in the city. The
bad-news story spurred dozens of on-line comments from people
bemoaning 110-mile commutes, salaries of under $34,000, and job
offerings that keep salaries at rock bottom while ratcheting up
requirements for education and experience. On the other hand, an
employer noted what happened when he advertised for the job of a
highly skilled “wireless radio engineer”: There were no
applicants, while an opening for administrative assistant brought
in 90 applications. Skyrocketing housing prices, though, dominated
the discussion. One man said he and his working wife finally
realized they will never be able to afford to live in the city;
Seattle, he concluded, “is so rich it can afford to do away
with common sense.”

ALASKA

When a biologist in a
helicopter shot a moose with a tranquilizer dart, the
animal failed to fall flat as expected. Instead, it charged the
helicopter and forced it to the ground, in an area some 50 miles
from Juneau that can boast of more moose than people. The pilot and
biologist were unharmed, reports the AP. The defiant moose was less
fortunate: It was slashed by the spinning tail rotor, and had to be
killed.

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