comebacks for everything

Have you ever had someone blame you for their own limitations? It is always easier to blame other people than take responsibility for your own life. There is a funny quote. “I didn’t say it was your fault. I just said I was going to blame you!”

Don’t let someone try and make you responsible for their problems, we are all absolutely responsible for where we are in life. If somebody overeats and smokes they are not going to be the healthiest person on the planet, most likely the person is probably substantially overweight and in poor health. The thing is, nobody can fix this for someone else. The person having the problem needs to change their habits, thinking and actions to get a different result.

When people are forced to deal with the consequences of their actions, they will finally be able to solve their own problems.

Here are some snappy comebacks when you get tired of being blamed for things that are obviously not your fault.

Vote for the best comeback when someone says it’s your fault

No really, it's adorable when you blame everyone but yourself.

You will always be the star of your own f***ing victim list.

If everywhere you go there's a problem.... guess what?

Don't blame me for your stupidity; take that up with your mom and dad.

Maybe you are minding your own business and some smart ass singles you out and says “What are you looking at!” It might catch you off guard, and be embarrassing when someone is publicly acting like such a jerk towards you for no reason.

You might want to just let it go, if the person is continually picking on you it might be helpful to say something back. Bullies often pick on people who they consider an easy mark, someone who won’t respond to their taunts and verbal abuse. If they know that you are going to slay them with a comeback and make them look publicly stupid, they won’t pick on you again.

Here are a few verbal smack downs next time some fool asks you what you are looking at.

Go ahead and vote for the best answer. If you can think of an even better comeback leave it in the comments below.

Vote for the best comeback when someone says what are you looking at

You're the kind of girl that a guy should show off... In show and tell for psychology class.

Your face is just fine but you will have to put a bag over that personality.

I wasn't checking you out. I was just admiring how the universe has blessed you.

You would be much more likable if it wasn't for that hole in your mouth that noise comes out of.

Justin Timberlake had to deal with bullies in high school

Justin Timberlake Wikipedia

Singer Justin Timberlake wasn’t so popular growing up because he preferred music to football and in the state of Tennessee, where he grew up, that just wasn’t considered cool. He’s pretty popular with the ladies now, but he reveals he was picked on all the time at school and he had I had terrible acne and weird hair. When Justin was on the Ellen Dengeneres show he said, “The thing about life … is …… is … everything … you feel makes you weird is essentially what’s gonna make you sexy as an adult…. When you’re a kid I think you try so hard to fit in and when you get older you realize that fitting in isn’t really the thing that’s more interesting…. I would not be here if I would have listened to the kids who told me I was a terrible singer and I was a sissy…. Be different.”

If someone seriously asks you to marry them then you probably want to honor the person and their feelings and give a respectful answer. After all, asking for someone’s hand in marriage takes a lot of courage.

If however you have someone who keeps asking you to marry them and you keep turning them down for various reasons, you may need a few funny answers. Really, who wants to get married before their time, especially to the wrong person?

When you are young, you have the opportunity to date a few people and see if someone is a good fit for you. Before you settle down, travel the world and really enjoy your life so when you do get married you are ready to make the commitment.

In the meantime, here are a few clever replies next time someone asks you to get married.

Vote for the best reply to will you marry me

I've already done some time.

I'm no organ donor but I'd be happy to give you my heart.

Great....but let me see the ring first.

Will you still love me after we've had 3 kids, no sex life and I have plotted your death more than once?

Everyone knows someone who never seems to arrive on time, in your case that’s probably you.

If you are always running late you have probably pissed off quite a few people in your life over time. Your friends and family have probably sat around waiting for you in restaurants, people’s homes and the movies.

Cultures assign different meanings to time, in the West being late and keeping people waiting is considered incredibly rude. They should know what you are like by now, when they keep asking if you are ready to go out.

Next time your exasperated family, boyfriend or coworkers complain that you’re late, use one of our clever comebacks. Tell us what you think and vote for the best snarky comeback. If you have an even better comeback, do share, leave us a message below.

Vote for the best comeback when someone asks if you are ready

I told you I'd be ready in five minutes. Stop calling me every hour.

It's better to arrive late than to arrive ugly!

Just a reminder that I'll always be running late.

Axl Rose is late for his own concerts

Via Wikipedia.org

Axl Rose ,of Guns N’ Roses fame, has made his fans wait up to three hours before he showed up for a concert. He has been notoriously late to shows for years causing fans to go wild and riot.

Apparently, being late also meant staying true to the Guns N’ Roses brand of being the wild boys of rock n roll.

Sometimes in life, we’re left with no other choice other than to burn bridges with some of the people around you. Burning bridges is often defined as intentionally cutting off someone or a group of people with no way to reconnect. While some people may advise you to not completely cut off someone, it can sometimes be the only option.

In life, there are some people that once you meet them, they turn out to be worse than you could ever possibly imagine, and maybe burning your bridges with them is the only way to get rid of them. However, just because this is sometimes necessary, doesn’t mean that you should do this to everyone. For example, when you quit your job, it may not be your best course of action to tell your boss what you really think of them.

There are many examples of people burning bridges when quitting a job. One time, a flight attendant announced that he quit over the PA system on the airplane, and then took some beers and exited the plane via the emergency chute. Another instance, a reporter from Anchorage, Alaska was reporting on live television when in the middle of her broadcast, she just quit. Both of these people probably burned their bridges with their now former employers!

While burning bridges may not always be the best route, sometimes it’s the only one to take. Only you know what’s best, and if it comes down to it, don’t hesitate to burn bridges with people who you don’t want in your life, and don’t let some know-it-all lecture you on what is best for you.

Here are some clever comebacks when people tell you not to burn your bridges.

Vote for the best comeback for you shouldn’t burn bridges

May the bridges I burn light the way.

I don't regret burning bridges. I regret that some of the people weren't on them when I burnt them!

Sometimes you have to burn a few bridges to stop the crazy people from following you.

Burning bridges isn't a bad thing. It prevents you from going back to places you never should have been to begin with.