19 Things Trustworthy Men Never Do

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When you want to give people the benefit of the doubt, it’s hard to know how strict or lax to be, especially when it comes to dating somebody new. You try to remind yourself that you don’t know their entire back story, that it’s easy to take things out of context and that it takes time to get to know someone. On that note, you may let some things slide that rub you the wrong way. But as a human, and especially as a woman, you should listen to your intuition because it’s probably right. If a man does something that makes him seem suspicious, dishonest, or like he’s in this for the wrong reasons, don’t make excuses for him; confront him about what he did or, if it’s really bad, just walk away. Because one thing is for certain, these are some things trustworthy men never do.

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Give no explanation

If a trustworthy man runs late or takes an unreasonably long time to return a call, he tells you why. He doesn’t just show up late, say, “Sorry I’m late” and change the subject. Trustworthy men want you always to feel secure, so they explain as much as you need them to.

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Bad-talk another woman

Trustworthy men do not go on extensively about how awful an ex-girlfriend or another date was. They understand that that’s disrespectful since that person isn’t there to defend themselves and they wouldn’t want you to worry that they may talk about you that way.

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Reschedule constantly

Trustworthy men do not reschedule constantly. If a guy has to reschedule once, fine, but if he has to do it several times when you’ve barely started dating, then that means he is easily distracted by another, more exciting thing or makes promises he can’t keep.

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Change personality around various people

People with integrity are the same person, no matter who they are around. They don’t become more pompous around coworkers to “impress” them, or more gossipy around gossipers.

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Become defensive when you tease them

When people cannot handle being teased, that means they are insecure. When people are insecure, they cannot be trusted because easing their insecurities will always come above everything else.

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Share private information about other people

Like the fact that their friend’s wife is having an affair or their coworker is having money problems. Even if you never meet these people, they know that those people wouldn’t want strangers knowing their dirty laundry.

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Only show affection privately

If a man only shows you affection in private, but in group settings treats you just like anybody else there, he cannot be trusted.

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Pass a lot of judgment

Passing a lot of judgment is another form of insecurity. When men feel secure in themselves, they don’t need to criticize others a lot. When they don’t feel secure, they’ll constantly judge other people for the tiniest flaws—that could extend to you.

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Fail to confirm plans

Trustworthy men confirm plans. If you make plans with a man a week before the actual date, he will message you the day before or at least the morning of to confirm you’re still on—he won’t leave you wondering if you are.

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Say, “I don’t want to talk about that.”

Men don’t need to tell you everything on the first few dates, but if they completely run away from a topic, something is off there. Trustworthy men at least provide a brief explanation as to why they don’t want to talk about something.

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Make very vague plans

Trustworthy men don’t say, “We should do something sometime” or “I’ll give you a call some time.” Trustworthy men pull up their calendars, look at dates, and ask if you want to do a specific thing on a specific day. And they tell you when they will call, making themselves accountable for that call.

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Stay closed off about their feelings

You can’t really trust anybody who is uncomfortable communicating their feelings. If a man can’t tell you how he feels, he is bound to make himself unhappy in a relationship, and find ways to ease that (via cheating, picking fights out of nowhere, etc…)

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“Forget” about plans

Trustworthy men don’t forget about plans—they set phone alarms, they keep calendars, and they put giant post-it notes around their place if they have to. Trustworthy people make it so that they cannot possibly forget about a plan.

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Pretend to like people they don’t like

Trustworthy people don’t pretend to like people they don’t like. They will be polite, of course, but they won’t make a grand show of pretending to be over-the-moon thrilled to see somebody they secretly despise.

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Make promises they can’t keep

Trustworthy men will not tell you they can do something unless they’re certain they can. People who aren’t trustworthy often will make promises they can’t keep, just to get the praise and adoration making that promise gets them at the time.

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Try to get things for free

Trustworthy men don’t pretend their food was bad or there was a hair in their drink to get something free at a restaurant. In fact, most trustworthy men brush off those things even if they are true.

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Belittle people

Trustworthy men speak to everyone like they are their equal—everyone.

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Change their life goals every month

Trustworthy men have rather steadfast goals; they don’t fly from one dream to another every week. If they don’t know what they want out of life, then they don’t know who they are and they can’t be trusted.

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Try to get others to pull their weight

Not only do trustworthy men not try to get others to pull their weight, but they even pull the weight of other people, on top of their own. They always think about how they can help others, and do more, rather than get out of things.