Linux Songs Poems

I've been on this lonely road so long,
Does anybody know where it goes,
I remember last time the signs pointed home,
A month ago.
-- Carpenters, "Road Ode"

Linux Songs Poems: 272 of 719

I've built a better model than the one at Data General
For data bases vegetable, animal, and mineral
My OS handles CPUs with multiplexed duality;
My PL/1 compiler shows impressive functionality.
My storage system's better than magnetic core polarity,
You never have to bother checking out a bit for parity;
There isn't any reason to install non-static floor matting;
My disk drive has capacity for variable formatting.
I feel compelled to mention what I know to be a gloating point:
There's lots of room in memory for variables floating-point,
Which shows for input vegetable, animal, and mineral
I've built a better model than the one at Data General.
-- Steve Levine, "A Computer Song" (To the tune of
"Modern Major General", from "Pirates of Penzance",
by Gilbert & Sullivan)

Linux Songs Poems: 273 of 719

I've finally found the perfect girl,
I couldn't ask for more,
She's deaf and dumb and over-sexed,
And owns a liquor store.

Linux Songs Poems: 274 of 719

I/O, I/O,
It's off to disk I go,
A bit or byte to read or write,
I/O, I/O, I/O...

IBM had a PL/I,
Its syntax worse than JOSS;
And everywhere this language went,
It was a total loss.

Linux Songs Poems: 277 of 719

If a nation expects to be ignorant and free,
... it expects what never was and never will be.
-- Thomas Jefferson

Linux Songs Poems: 278 of 719

If a system is administered wisely,
its users will be content.
They enjoy hacking their code
and don't waste time implementing
labor-saving shell scripts.
Since they dearly love their accounts,
they aren't interested in other machines.
There may be telnet, rlogin, and ftp,
but these don't access any hosts.
There may be an arsenal of cracks and malware,
but nobody ever uses them.
People enjoy reading their mail,
take pleasure in being with their newsgroups,
spend weekends working at their terminals,
delight in the doings at the site.
And even though the next system is so close
that users can hear its key clicks and biff beeps,
they are content to die of old age
without ever having gone to see it.

Linux Songs Poems: 279 of 719

If all be true that I do think,
There be five reasons why one should drink;
Good friends, good wine, or being dry,
Or lest we should be by-and-by,
Or any other reason why.

Linux Songs Poems: 280 of 719

If all the seas were ink,
And all the reeds were pens,
And all the skies were parchment,
And all the men could write,
These would not suffice
To write down all the red tape
Of this Government.