If such a wonderful show did exist (call me if you need an executive producer), Chris Elliott could probably be the host. No, not comedian Chris Elliott of Cabin Boy fame – though he also might make a decent host. We’re talking about Chris Elliott, a professor of food safety at Queen’s University Belfast in Northern Ireland. His team describes themselves as “the food detectives,” specifically looking into suspicious food. “Our laboratory in Belfast has a reputation of being one of the very best in terms of detecting food fraud,” Elliott says in the video above.

Elliott and his cohorts uncovered the highly publicized horse meat scandal. More recently, he said his lab has been finding fraud in the world of coconuts. Who knew? But don’t take my word for it: Watch the video above and you can see Elliott explain how much of what you eat isn’t what you think it is – assuming you’re ready to be afraid to ever eat anything again.

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