2014 Goal Conclusion and Goals for 2015

A year ago today I set goals for 2014 and then updated the progress of them in June. As a final goodbye to 2014 I thought it would be appropriate to share with you the final progress of the goals and where I stand with them on the last day of the year. The regular font will be the initial goals, bold where I was in June and italicized will be where I am now.

Blog everyday- I would like to try and really do this as well as have some sort of schedule for the postings. Well I think I’ve only missed one day, even if I’m posting after midnight. However, I think I have made up that post I missed. But, I stopped with the schedule it wasn’t working for me. I think I kept it for two or three months, which I find impressive. I blogged almost everyday and if I missed any days I’ve made up for them in the past few days or in the course of the year. After I publish this post I will have 365 posts published this year. I did not use a schedule because although it helped sometimes I felt that it stifled my creativity. In the future I hope to do some series or have a Monday or Friday feature, but not everyday like I had planned.

Reach 300 followers, this is just a personal goal and if it doesn’t happen it’s totally okay I think it’s something I want to try. Well I’m almost to 200 so it seems attainable. However, I think blogging is so much more than the number of followers, but also the quality. The people I’ve talked to in comments have lead to a friendship. Blogging is a place where I can speak my mind freely and people who share the same opinion will find me or those who disagree will find me and let me know. I hit 300 followers at the beginning of the month and I cried a lot of tears from happiness. I never imagined it would happen considering at the start of the year I hadn’t even hit 100. This is more than followers, it’s friends as I said in June. And to those of you who I talk with frequently or infrequently thank you for being there.

Make a really good friend at school, someone to hang out with and get meals with on a regular basis. I did make really good friends at school last semester, you know who you are. I love you guys. When I wrote this I was talking about different people. This semester I have made really good friends, again you know who you are but you have all touched me and helped me more than you know.

Get a new job, and this doesn’t mean quit my current job because it’s a good safety net but I really need a new job to make more money. I did better than this, or at least in my opinion, I got an awesome internship, that’s paid and I’m making more money. I’m very happy where I am now. I think this something that I could just check of my list as soon as I got my internship. A better opportunity at a place where I wasn’t so miserable.

A more positive outlook on life- I really need to stop being so negative and hating everything, and I want to try to be more optimistic. I think I have been slightly more optimistic so far this year. I don’t think I’m as negative as I was, but I still wouldn’t say I’m optimistic. I will never be an optimist, I’m what I like to call a realist, other people would say pessimist. I am happy with my attitude if I can influence in a positive way rather than a negative way, even if my outlook isn’t so positive, which it is more so now.

Go to a party for more than 30 minutes. This is something that I just need to do for myself, I don’t need to drink or do drugs or whatever people do at parties but I need to experience college better. I think after last nights post it’s safe to say I haven’t done this and I won’t be doing it anytime soon. I went to a party. Not a big party, just a small one. I went for a few hours, which is really more than the half hour goal, so check.

Try to overcome my anxiety. I just want to figure out and calm down so it’s not so bad because it hinders me from doing things that I really want to do and that needs to stop. I think after my semi-regular anxiety updates we know where I am. Right now, I’m in a bad place, tomorrow I could be in a good place. I think it’s really inconsistent and I still need to seek help. I never found help, but it’s gotten better. I think when I’m uncomfortable or in situations that I don’t like or places I don’t like it gets worse. I think that’s why it was so bad at school last year because I hated it, and that’s why it gets bad at work, because I hate it. Now, it’s better at school because I’m comfortable and the anxious feelings only come for a little and panic attacks become a lot less frequent.

Stop cracking my knuckles- pretty self explanatory. Well I forgot about this one so it’s not going well consider I still crack my knuckles all the time. I forgot again, whoops.

To be passionate about something- I feel like a lot of things, but I don’t feel like I’m really passionate about anything and I really really want to be. I think I’m passionate about blogging. I love it. There are some night where it’s 11:00 and I have work in the morning, where I think to myself “Shit, I still have to write a quick post for tonight.” But even then it’s not like I hate doing, I’m more annoyed at myself for staying out too late or doing nothing all night and just not doing it. I’m also becoming very passionate about Arrowheart, working on new designs, promoting it on social media and such, I’m really excited about it. I am passionate about my blog. I love blogging. I love logging on and responding to comments. Yes, I regret blogging everyday because my content is not as good as it could be but I still love to do it. I could talk about my blog and how I want to improve it for hours. The hardest thing to do is find something worthy of writing about.

300 YouTube subscriber, which I’m seeing as kind of unrealistic right now but it’s something that I would like to hopefully achieve this year. I stopped YouTuber, and I talked to Hiba about it for a little bit and she’s encouraging, but when we looked at the broader picture I’m not sure it’s a good idea. I realized all it takes is one big person to like your videos and you’re channel will spiral and that’s not something I want. I don’t want to be YouTube famous, and I’m not saying that’s what would’ve happened to me, but if it did, I don’t think I would’ve been able to handle it. For now, I’ll stay behind my screen. I tried Dear December and I love editing but I just don’t have strong enough ideas, I’m not passionate about it. I don’t care enough to make quality content, I would rather put in my time and energy here rather than there for the time being.

I would like to better recognize those who actually care about me compared to those who only want things from me. Slowly but surely I think I’ve been doing that. It’s hard but I’m trying, sometimes I don’t know what to do. I do this now. I distance myself from people who don’t seem to care as much and focus on those who really do. It’s hard to cut people out from life but it is not good to have negative influences in your life. You shouldn’t hang out with people who don’t appreciate you, that’s what 2014 taught me.

I want to remember to tell those I appreciate how much they mean to me. I try to tell everyone that I appreciate them, but I’m not sure if I always do that, I think I’m trying though. I think I do this. I try and tell people that they matter to me, I try to acknowledge that their presence in my life is important to me.

I need to keep in mind that I am really lucky especially when things are bad. I don’t do this enough. I think more so lately, especially when things go my way. I should do it more when I’m not happy though. I think I do this more so now. I don’t think a lot of people do this enough, but I have been better at.

I would love to learn something new, so suggestions please! I need a cool new hobby! I don’t think I’ve done this yet… I’m not sure what to do! Leave me comments of what to learn! I never got around to this unfortunately. I did join newspaper at school so maybe that can kind of count.

Joe Sugg. Look him up, I’m in love with him. Tell him to love me. Well I hate to tell you guys but I’m not in love with Joe anymore. I have a real life crush on Connor Franta, like an actual crush. When I watch his videos he’s like everything I look for in a guy and it sucks because of two reasons 1) He might be gay, 2) He has no idea who I am. So if you want you can tweet him my twitter name (@mrmilligan13) and just tell him that I’m perfect for him, feel free :) I am no longer in love with Connor because he did come out as gay. I actually don’t have a crush on any YouTubers or anyone for that matter. This makes my life that much more boring.

So I don’t think I did half bad for 2014, I make a lot of goals so I can accomplish a lot. I did the same thing for 2015- developed 15 goals for the year of things that I hope to accomplish not change which is why I like goals rather than resolutions.

Study abroad. One of my big goals for the year is to study abroad for the fall semester. I really hope this works out, I’ll keep you guys posted once I find out if it’ll work out or not.

Take care of self– mind and body. I need to start eating better and caring more of myself rather than just filling myself with crap. I don’t want to set a goal like lose ten pounds or anything, I just want to be a healthier person in general.

Get shit together. Sorry about the swearing, I just feel like I need to get my life organized in way that makes it more maintainable and less stressful.

Do not take anyone’s crap. If someone is treating me badly my goal is not to take it. I can be a pushover sometimes and I don’t want that to happen anymore.

Develop a plan of somesort. I don’t have a life plan, a five year plan, or even a one year plan. I want to have a plan that I can help guide me so that I feel like my life has some order to it, or at least feels that way.

Be more creative. I want to inspire my own creativity, craft more, paint more, just create more.

Blog 3-5 times a week with good, strong posts. I don’t want my blog to slack like I feel like it has this year because I blogged everyday. While it had it’s advantages I don’t feel like I was very good at finding a post everyday that was strong, I hardly planned ahead and there were some days where my posts were just bad. I also want to spend the few days off organizing and elaborating more of the blog itself in addition to the content I produce.

Positivity- I don’t have to be the most positive person but make an effort to be a positive person in people’s lives. I don’t need to be an optimist like I said before, I just want to be a positive influence in the lives of the people around me.

Surround myself with people who truly care. I don’t want to waste my time with people who only want to be with me when I’m the backup option. I don’t have to be the first, but I don’t want someone to hangout with me because they don’t have anything better.

Care more. I care about people a lot, probably to an annoying point where I always ask what they need or what I can do for them and I constantly make sure they’re okay because I worry but I need to care more about myself. I need to care more about what I do and how everything affects me long term.

Develop a passion for something. I have a passion for my blog but nothing else. I want to have passion for something I can do long term and maybe for the rest of my life, more than just a hobby.

Work and try harder. I do a lot of things very half-assed. I want to do things in a way where I give it my all. Everything I do should be my best efforts not my an attempt or a try it should be great.

Don’t waste time. I feel like I waste so much time just laying around and doing nothing I should do something affective with that time.

Be more self-confident. I don’t want to look in a mirror and see things I don’t like about myself or want to change, I want to walk out the door confidently and happy with how I am.

Be more receptive of compliments and criticism. I don’t take either of these really well, compliments tend to make me feel uncomfortable because I question the motives and how genuine the person giving them is. I tend not to take criticism well because I think I’m always right and that’s how I like to live life, but I need to take into account other people’s opinions when it comes to what I say and think.

I know this was long so thanks for sticking around if you did. I hope you all have a good new year, thanks for being there for me during 2014. Everyone who reads this means a lot to me, more than you think.

Happy New Year, Mary! You have great resolutions and I’m sure you’ll do great with following through! Some of my resolutions include: working harder to get through my anxiety, working harder to not letting my anxiety take control, exercising more, and practicing more.