'I think of nothing but love. The continual amusement I derive from intellectual pursuits, for which I am always being reproached as if it were a crime, finds its very justification in this singular and unceasing taste for love. For me there is no idea that is not eclipsed by love.If it were up to me, everything opposed to love would be abolished. That is roughly what I mean when I claim to be an anarchist.'- Louis Aragon (1924)

Friday, February 10, 2006

Santiago Valentino

Crooning on my STEREO: Attention by ROUGE ROUGE

My mobile rang. I picked it up. Me: HELLO?

Idiot: Hi... its me. *beep*

Me: Oh hello. How are you?

Idiot: Good good. I hope I am not disturbing you with all the missed calls...

Me: Oh no no, I have been busy with work and all....(me thinks: I detest people who disguise calls under 'Withhold ID.' I smell a fish.)Idiot: So, I don't want you to get the wrong idea but I wanna date you.

Me: Erm... You have not even asked me if I was single. (me thinks: QUICK... QUICK... think of SOMETHING!!!!)

Idiot: Oh yeahh... are you single?

Me: NO. (me thinks: GET THE DRIFT??)

Idiot: Oh I see. I am NOT either.

Me: THEN? (me thinks: WTF???)

Idiot: You see, i have a girlfriend but she's really quiet and all.....I don't really want to be seen with her ..

Me: Look dude. I'd love to take down your girlfriend's number and have a girly chat with her. (me thinks: You stinking cow of a chav you should just burn in HELL)

Idiot: But you see... this whole thing is complicated. But I will sort it out with her and THEN I CAN DATE YOU.

Me: Yo shitback, WHO DO YOU THINK I AM? Some random girl on loan to deprived boyfriends? (me thinks: COMPLICATED? Why draw ME into your screwedup pile of sith )

Idiot: Like I said, dont get the wrong idea... I am sure your boyfriend is away from this country and my girlfriend wouldn't know......

Me: Listen townie I have fantastic news for you. My phone is on SPEAKER MODE and my fiancee is seated right NEXT TO ME.

Idiot: oh.....

Me: Ciao bugger. I am going to pee.

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DON'T EVEN TRY. I am better off dating an APE this coming VALENTINE'S DAY.

SUCKERS. YOU LOT TIRE ME.

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Note: I figured out that I've lost a fair number of stalkers due to the lack of updates. Well, i apologise for this growing inconsistency. Blame it on my job. Pimpin' aint easy, y'know. I suppose that a single post every week should suffice. Now, run to the corner and CRY.