Yeah. That bad. It sort of makes me wonder why I bother wearing nice clothes or putting make up on. Oh yes! I don't! I'll just setttle right back down in my €5 stained tracksuit bottoms, and promotional t-shirt from the work trip to the Millenium Dome, pick my spots and eat my bodyweight in chocolate pumpkins and quit fretting.

I'm thinking maybe tomorrow I should go for this:

I've been wanting to make a cabbage leaf mask for soooo long and this cabbage was just perfect - I love its twisty, curly headpiece. I look like Mr Oogie Boogie Man from the Nightmare Before Christmas don't I?

Disturbing. I'm like the creepy, creepy vegetable man from some German cautionary tale about small boys who don't eat their greens. I'm the evil spirit of brassicas. See this and never eat cabbage again. Note that I spent time making a cabbage leaf mask, but the kitchen is in exactly the same state as yesterday (though Makka Pakka is gone, I think the CFO binned him while we were out). Fingers tried it too.

It would take more than that to scare Fingers off green things though. Please observe as my freakish child eats RAW. Brussel. Sprouts.

"Maman!" whines his elder brother, jealously. "Why does Fingers have chou et chou de bruxelles and not ME?"

"There's plenty for everyone of you freaks, uh, darlings"

Also, doesn't the hall look nice with that liberal coating of christ knows what? Delightful; welcome once more to my gorgeous home.

Mmm, delicious. (Freaks).

I rent them out to exercise peer pressure on other children for a small fee, payable in Fruit Shoots and Pokemon cards.

*Newer readers may need to know I am bald, not merely a collector of balding wigs. Bald underneath the balding wig. Yes indeed!

I'm so sorry but I only tolerate sprout eating on one day of the year due to the windy after effects! I could happily eat those cute boys though!Ref. the wig, I rather like those spangly pink ones that come out at parties! t.xx

OK, I'm not an expert on wigs so I'll pass. Your children are freaks, granted. But what I don't get is, what's wrong with your kitchen and hall? No matter how hard I look, I see nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing I wouldn't see in my own respective rooms. Except the nice tiles of course. (Ha ha, my word verification word thingy is 'prennyli'. That alone made it worth commenting.)

Could you artfully arrange the hair on one of the wigs with a hairclip so the bald patch doesn't show, even in wind? That's what I would try to do. But a bald patch is certainly better than a bruised bald patch,non? Either that or paste on some nasty-looking scabs up there so people really feel sorry for you/are frightened of you and give you extra space in elevators.

Fingers looks awesome in his cabbage mask!

And truly, you are a show-off with your raw-vegetable-eating children. I'll borrow them any time, for peer-pressure purposes. My children exist on nothing but chocolate milk & peanut butter. Well, one of them will eat fruit, but the other one won't even eat bananas or grapes anymore. sigh. If we didn't have modern vitamin supplements, they'd both have the scurvy.

Ok, first thing I notice is how pretty the remaining wig hair is. So shiny and such a nice color. Obviously of lovely quality. Why do they (the wigs) keep balding? Seems unfair and wrong.

The question was "which is worse?", right? The bruised mole wrench pince vise gripper attacked one, surely.. unless you can keep that head wound from popping out at inopportune times.

Is it time for a new one? When one feels good about their hairs, one feels good about everything... even stained sweatpants and t-shirts... which, by the way, is exactly what I'm wearing right now. Exactly.

As a fellow lawyer I can appreciate that hot pink will not do for work - stick to *2, it has more hair and get hot pink for the days you don't work come the New Year.

Peer pressure does not work in the veggie eating world. I have one that eats all vegetables known to man and one that eats next to none. She is not influenced by her sister, or by her cute 3 year old cousin who also eats every veggie put in front of her with relish. Only expensive clothes and toys have the peer pressure effect.

Like Juci, I see nothing wrong with your hall. Mine is obstructed by a large dead TV and large redundant PC screen waiting for a kind, strong brother in law to take them to the dump for me.

And I don't have nice tiles either. Just grubby carpet and peeling wallpaper.

How about #2 with a scarf type affair tied artfully around? Or possibly some furry earmuffs on a headband thingy? Or borrow a fez from Non Working Monkey? Or attach a little crocheted drinks mat (you know the sort....you get them at village fetes!) over the bald bit attached with kirby grips and say you copied it from Vogue?I must say it does seem horribly unfair that WIGS go bald!! I never knew that......but yes I agree with katyboo that your talent for crafts is such that you could surely match and mend?And by the way you have some LOVELY things in your house I am very glad (but not actually surprised) to see!!

when my two nephews lived with me, one would eat any vegetable, tuber or fruit and eat it raw (including potatoes and turnips, which i love cooked but, honestly, bleeeech!) and the other one who i think didn't eat any other vegetable except corn until he was 15...