Finding A Way To Let Things Go

30062008

I’ve unearthed an old letter I wrote a few years back. I was cleaning my room when I found it lodged between two old books I forgot I owned. These are one of several letters I wrote that I managed to send, amidst great internal battles not to – mostly out of fear that I will not like the response. It brought memories, and then some.

Our way of doing things wasn’t cutting it. What is wrong here is the fact that as much as we try to make it work the more it goes utterly astray. We tried to talk, but even that we screwed it up. It astounds me that the whole thing became an incoherent yell fest of nonsensical blames and faults. We set out to fix it but we walked away broken and more confused than when we started. I never doubted that you want to make things work but I’m having a hard time figuring out what exactly we are trying to accomplish. I’m done blaming personality issues, we both know we’re much smarter than that, yet it all boils down to it. We clash as much as we jive and it pains me more than you know. When we’re good, we bring out the best of everything even the ones that use to make us cry. However, when things are bad, sometimes I just want to breakdown and start yelling for someone to wake me up thinking I got stuck in one of my nightmares.

I’ve said it a million times and I will say it again. If I mean so much to you, why can’t you give me a straight answer when I put this relationship into a clutch? They say it all comes together in the end, but have you ever asked yourself if this is the type of ending I deserve?

Give me a good reason to stay and commit to because wanting to keep me for keeping’s sake is just awful. We’ve managed to get so lost deep into each other’s misery that we fail to recognize the importance of finding our way back to what put us together.

Like this:

Related

Actions

Information

The Big Day

People believe it’s what people do. And it is that belief, that rock solid belief, that makes things happen.

Thinking of

my wedding ... our cake ... our rings ... the primary sponsors ... how my traje de boda will look like ... wanting to starve myself to waif thin waistline ... but can't because of my full time job ... this weekend's wedding expo at the mall ...

“I think we ought to read only the kind of books that wound and stab us.”

Read

"I dreamed a dream of angels. I saw them and heard them in a great and endless galactic night. I saw the lights that were these angels, flying here and there, in streaks of irresistible brilliance ... I felt love around me in this vast and seamless realm of sound and light ... And something akin to sadness swept me up and mingled my very essence with the voices who sang, because the voices were singing of me ..."

Never wound what you can’t kill

PROVISO:

THE THOUGHTS, OPINIONS, AND OVERALL COMMENTARY FROM THE AUTHOR OF THIS PARTICULAR BLOG ARE NOT MEANT TO BE HARMFUL IN ANY WAY.
ALL PHOTOS, MEDIA, AND DOWNLOADABLE FILES HERE ARE NOT MEANT TO INFRINGE ANY COPYRIGHT LAWS OR FREEDOMS. ITS USE FALL UNDER THE "FAIR USE" DOCTRINE OF THE U.S. COPYRIGHT STATUTE. IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEM WITH ANY FILES OR STATEMENTS USED WITHIN THE BLOG, PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT IN MY MEEBO (PROVIDE YOUR RETURN CONTACT DETAILS) AND WE’LL RESPOND TO IT APPROPRIATELY.