Saturday, 28 February 2015

Things you should never say to someone who has lost weight

Losing weight is honestly one of the best things I have ever done for myself, it's given me a brand new lease of life by giving me lots of confidence and belief in myself. However, there have been times when it hasn't been easy from a food point of view or from an emotional point of view. Don't get me wrong 90% of what people have said to me has been totally complimentary but there's always been that 10% of people who (sometimes knowingly, sometimes not) have said things that have either upset me or made me quite angry! Body confidence and confidence in general, no matter what your size, is quite a fragile thing and someone can shatter it in just a few words so next time you see your friend/relative who looks to have lost a bit of weight or who you know is on a healthy eating plan, just remember these things...

You can't eat that, you're on a diet!

Firstly, I am not on a diet, I am following a 'healthy eating plan' and secondly yes I CAN eat that because I have counted my calories/Syns/Points.

Wow, you must have been big before!

With this one I can never tell whether they're actually implying that I'm STILL big or what...

Don't stop now, keep going

Well actually, I think I have finished losing weight because I'm happy as I am but you saying that makes me doubt myself. Have I lost enough, do I still look 'big'?

You look so much better

This is a difficult one to be honest, and I know for a fact that these people don't mean to offend but although they think they're giving a compliment, to me it fills my head with all the things they must have thought of me before I lost weight. I know I look better, I feel better but this is one of those things that's kind of an insult and a compliment at the same time. If you want to say someone looks 'better' say 'you look great' instead.

One little bit won't hurt/won't make a difference (when talking about synful foods)

Well actually yes it will hurt and it will make a difference. Everything that passes your lips will show on the scales and maybe that 'bit' won't make a LOT of difference it could tip me over into eating a whole piece or whatever. I remember my husband and I once had an argument about a piece of quiche because I wouldn't have a bite to 'try it' but I knew if I had a 'bite' I would have wanted a full piece and the craving would have then been there for the rest of the night.

How much do you weigh now?

Quite a few people have asked me this and to be honest I've kind of got used to it now but I can't help but think 'why does it matter?!' there was something I saw on Pinterest which said something along the lines of 'my weight is no concern of yours unless I'm sitting on you' - so yeah, that!! Asking someone how much weight they've lost is different because you're not talking actual figures which show on the scales so if you really must ask the 'how much' question, try and ask in terms of how much they've lost.

Moral of the story is... if you're unsure as to whether it's 'ok' to say something to someone, don't say it! And if you're on the receiving end of anything like this remember that the person saying it probably means well and doesn't mean to offend, chances are they've never been in your shoes and the most important thing is to not let anything or anyone stand in the way of your weight loss!

*if you're reading this and you've ever said any of these things, don't worry, I probably didn't take offence, you'd know if I had! haha