Hey, Little Stray

I had a friend read over this, and she thought it was good enough to submit on here. I had this sitting around in my Drive, so I thought, Why not share it with you guys? Of course, I ended up drawing an art piece to accompany the depressing and glum tone of the poem, but it turns out that I couldn't add it until it is already uploaded and approved. I hope you guys enjoy this, ummm, dingy-go-lucky poem!

Feel free to leave any critiques for me; they are very much appreciated.

Hey, Little Stray Your tail is tucked From the horror You had witnessed. You lost the stock That gave you pride And the strong will To carry on.

Hey, Little Stray Your neck is exposed From the collar You had severed. You cut the ties You once had made With the only ones You had held dear.

Hey, Little Stray Your smile is faded From the brutal Words you endure. You no longer Have the bright grin You once possessed On your dour face.

Hey, Little Stray Your heart is rutted From the damage It could not bare. You stow away The scattered shards To hide the fact You are ruined.

Hey, Little Stray When will you see All the beauty Within this pain? Your tail, your neck You heart, your smile These should not be What define you.

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@Bacon. Amazing job! Really sad and can really be relatable to the stray animals. This sounded like a song which is really something that takes time. I saw your drawing with it and I wish people get to see that. The only critics I will say is to be sure with your choice of words. Some words disrupted your flow and the best way to do that is to read it over and over so that you can detect errors and to help the poem flow better. Over all, awesome job and don't stop writing and drawing! :)

@SpeakerofWolves Thank you so much!!! Yeah, poetry was never really my thing, but I am challenging myself to write more of it. Some words did not really help the flow of the words; I am glad someone else brought it to my attention! :) I will definitely work on that in the future. I really appreciate the advice and encouragement!!

@Bacon. You are so welcome. I know poetry is hard, it was especially hard for me. I been writing last year for a class project and my teacher told me to try out this writing competition. I tried it out and while I was waiting to see if I won something, my librarian told about Teen Ink and she recommends it to me. I went to the website and I immediately loved it. I then got the results and the sad part is that I didn't win anything. Although I was sad, my work got published in this website and I ... (more »)