Tag Archives: Relationships

“It (your mind) is so dangerous that you can do things that are delusional, imaginative and unintentional. And equally, it is so beneficial that you can create things that can be miracles.” Yogi Bhajan

You already know this: your relationship with your mind can generate great joy or great turmoil. Your relationship with your mind can create peace or anxiety, serenity or depression, stability or agitation.

The biggest problem is that you think you are your mind: every time your mind goes somewhere you go with it. When this happens, your mind owns you and from there you will develop a series of distorted behaviors that mirrors the patterns of your mind; the cycle never stops. When you follow your mind, you don’t know what the roots of your pain are, (as your mind will give you a good story about all your insecurities), and you can’t never heal.

The second important challenge is that you ask your mind for clarity. Your mind, if it leads your life, will always bring confusion. When you desperately look for answers, you disconnect from your true essence and eventually you don’t even know what you were looking for; you are now looking for answers to questions you don’t have.

When we realize how silly we can be with our own mind, then we have a chance to center and remember who we truly are and what needs healing. To create space between you and your mind you need a particular lifestyle that is unique for each of you. Of course, I can help you if you wish.

When you relate to your mind as a system of integration and synchronization instead of a chief in command, when you relate to your mind as a sensory system instead of an authority figure telling you what to do, then you can access everything known and unknown with peace and clarity.

In the world we are living in, unplugging seems the thing to do as we can easily get overwhelmed with the number of threats, crisis’s and catastrophes. Staying away from the news and the noise is tempting and at times necessary.

Yet, being connected and aware of what is happening on this planet is our human responsibility. We need to learn to be with the chaos and any crisis that occurs without drifting away. We need to stay rooted and not sink in despair but stand up or sit still in the middle of the storm.

Decide how much information you can digest without being lost, depressed or agitated. Yet don’t hide. If a hurricane destroys a part of this country, feel it. If a culture is getting threaten and bombed, feel it; if injustice happens, feel it. Feel it and keep your light on; there is no need to add to any destruction already happening on earth, there is no need to bring more drama.

Our responsibility to stay connected and stable inside requires each of us to have a mind-body-spirit practice. Any breath practices that will engage your belly are always great options. To name a few, breath of fire or any pumping breath will create a solid foundation.

The time is not to hide and separate, the time is to connect. When we connect, new strengths, new visions, new skills, and new energy appear. The magic of this era lies in the quality depth and authenticity of our relationships. Let’s decide to extend ourselves and reach out further; let’s decide to go deeper.

As human beings, we are faced with significant challenges that can elevate us or annihilate us. The way we relate to pain and pleasure is one of them. We believe that pleasure is good and pain is bad. We have a relationship with pleasure that is led by the emotional and mental bodies. In that context, pleasure puts you to sleep because it becomes a distraction or an addiction: more wine, more drugs, more jumping from one thing to another, etc.

When you experience the spiritual dimension of pleasure you expand, you are alive and vibrant; You Are Divine. To create that experience you have to do one thing, go in and drop deeper into your Self and stay.

As you learn to be with your Self, you transcend your thoughts and emotions, yet you pay attention to your senses, not from a place of cravings but a place of longing. You genuinely enjoy the realm of the physical, not from a place of reaction, but a place of choice and awareness. The spiritual experience of pleasure requires for you to commit to Self, moment to moment.

To benefit from the richness of commitment, start with a daily spiritual practice and learn to fall in love with your whole Self: the Self you like and the Self you don’t like. When this happens, you experience the stillness of love, the vastness of pleasure and your divinity.

As I have been “sitting around” for the past 12 days or so healing from a knee replacement, I have contemplated the following question: What is your first response when someone asks you about the true purpose of healing?

Is it to feel better? Have more vitality? Gain more joy? Get rid of your pains? All of these answers sound pretty good to me but that is not the ultimate purpose of healing; these benefits are the side effects of the healing process.

The ultimate purpose of healing is to develop your relationship with your true self, beyond your titles, your credentials and the different roles you are taking on as a mother, a father, a leader, etc. Some of you may say is that it? That does not sound like too much fun!

Let’s list of few benefits:

We make decisions that serve our heart not our ego.

Our emotions are not leading our life; they are part of it.

We are less reactive.

We are able to experience more inner stillness in time of chaos.

We are more aware and curious.

We are more authentic.

Our intuition expands.

The process of Healing brings us closer to our true self and from there our awareness expands tremendously. There is a sense of unity that is priceless to experience particularly when we are hitting a wall…any wall. And so be curious this month about what distracts you and what helps you to connect deeper with you!

Last week at the end of a talk on “How To Find Your Purpose”, I had several people who wanted to talk to me personally. That evening I was really tired fighting a sinus headache and I did not feel I had much more to give…I just wanted to go home. Several people wanted to talk to me at the end and a couple patiently waited for me. By then I could feel my heart closing down…The women, Cindy, shared that she has been diagnosed stage four pancreatic cancer last December. Within less than 30 seconds …I was not tired anymore and the three of us sat for a little while.

It was a great lesson for me. Tragedy woke me up. At that moment my mind had to drop and automatically my heart showed up. There was a new level of energy, a new set of priorities, a different listening and a new level of awakening. But really…Do I need a crisis to stay awake?

Every relationship is an opportunity for transformation, awakening and healing. I get reminded of this every day. Every relationship can give us a boost of energy when we choose to be engaged, open, sensitive and receptive. What is in the way to creating authentic relationships?

This month, surprise yourself. Reach out in a way you have not done before. Explore your resistance and fears and decide to break one of your old patterns in some of your relationships. Take a risk.

One of my beautiful true friends, Catherine, is a comic and mother of three. She has been diagnosed with LAM lung disease; a rare form of cancer in the lungs that they have not yet found a cure for.

In 2006, she was given 5 to 10 years to live and she is now more vibrant than ever. Her life force and heart are priceless and her humor is contagious. She has been able to raise 2 million dollars and attract some top-notch scientists to find a cure for this disease. She touches so many with compassion and great laughter that you can only do one thing when you are in her presence…open your heart and laugh really loud.

Here is a newly documentary about Catherine and her website if you would like to make a donation. Please watch it! You will be inspired!

Why am I talking about Catherine’s journey? In many ways Cat helps me to answer that question that has became louder for the past couple of months. How do I show up in this world? What do I stand for? What do I fight for?

I got my answer…I simply need to connect to my gifts and uplift moment to moment. That is where I heal others and myself; that is where I keep my inner light going.

If we listen to the Yogis, the heart’s projection has a 60-degree angle. By nature the heart uplifts.

Uplifting has nothing to do with motivating; there is no agenda to make the other person feel better or have more energy. Each time you expect an outcome you are not in the heart center you are in your will, convincing, forcing and pushing.

Uplifting is not about ignoring what does not work either. You still commit to glow no matter what. If you embrace that quality, every cause you stand up for will not eat you up. More than ever before we all need to glow.

Every change you truly desire starts at the heart center. Your will or your mindset may be useful to support any transition you want to create in your life, but without the heart energy the changes you are making will feel stressful or will not last.

There are two important practices that enhance the energy of the heart: gratefulness and forgiveness. All of us can gain to deepen our relationship with both. When we experience our heart energy, we live in the present and are open to receive intuitive guidance.

Over the past 25 years I have witnessed with my clients a lot of pain, struggle and confusion around the theme of forgiveness. I often notice a genuine desire to forgive and yet the feelings of resentment, anger and confusion are still present. We know that when we truly forgive we feel free, spacious and ready to reinvent our lives.