Andray Blatche is a step-back jumper wrapped in an enigma wrapped in conspiracy theorist tinfoil. He does nothing by any book and still somehow purifies in the waters of effectiveness. When the NBA keeps getting smaller and quicker, Blatche dominated in a lineup next to Brook Lopez, who is both similarly slow-footed and offense-geared. When he has the ball in his hands with under eight seconds on the shot clock, the universe ceases motion, unable to focus on anything but what might happen next. He seems to play possession to possession with no plan, no point of emphasis, and still pulls plays out of a magic hat. He lapped the league in "NO NO NO WHAT ARE YOU THI-nice shot" plays last season.