Rashes & More

Pubic Hair Color, Rashes, Relationships & Other Sex Questions

masturbation demonstration

A few years ago, when my brother's daughter reached puberty, his wife decided the best way to educate young girls not to be tempted to have premarital sex and risk pregnancy is for parents to demonstrate to them how to satisfy themselves and their prospective partners via mutual masturbation when they are unclothed. He tells me that it seems to have worked wonderfully well. I'd like to see another point of view on this because our eldest daughter has just reached puberty, and my husband is not so sure about this.

Dilbo

Dilbo,

To avoid accusing your sister-in-law of illegal practices, I’m going to assume that this “demonstration” did not involve her touching her daughter in any way or illustrating the lesson on herself while unclothed. While it’s hard for me to understand how such a demonstration would occur otherwise, I am hoping that this masturbation “lesson” took place in a legal, appropriate manner — however impossible that may be.

Dilbo, in my trusted opinion, this is a very radical approach to teaching abstinence and in many ways, it ultimately seems like a very ineffective one. On average, young girls start to undergo puberty from as young as 10 years old. Providing a masturbation demonstration to young girls who favor tea parties over sex not only seems highly inappropriate and out of line, but generally senseless and irrelevant.

Trust me, when the time comes for dating and sex to be a priority on their lists, girls will discover all the ins and outs of mutual masturbation on their own — and, of course, with a little bit of help from their testosterone-fueled boyfriends.

Here’s a thought: If you want your daughter to know about your thoughts on premarital sex and pregnancy risk, why not tell her about them? Sex education rather than a sex demonstration is the key to effective guidance on the subject. Teaching a 10- to 12-year-old how to masturbate does not say, “This is where babies come from” or “This is how to protect yourself from pregnancy.”

Donald Zimmer

turning gray

When you get older, does your pubic hair turn gray?

Stephen

Stephen,

Sorry to break it to you, my friend, but with age your decreasingly virile penis will in fact be shrouded in gray pubic hair. Once you do begin to notice a change of color in the area, trimming the hair might hide most of the grayness. Hair coloring — while not recommended by health professionals because of possible skin irritation — is also performed by those who are severely bothered by this reminder of their progressing age. Donald Zimmer