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In the December issue of Marie Claire magazine, actress Anna Kendrick—who also made the cover—discusses her physical appearance and the criticism she often receives for her looks.

“The most common thing that I get is, ‘Am I the only one who doesn’t think that Anna Kendrick is pretty?’” she said. “And you’re like, ‘No, you’re not the only one. Arguably, all of the boys in my high school agree with you.”

Apparently, this wasn’t the first time Kendrick had to defend her image. Something similar happened last August in an interview with Glamour magazine.

“The thing is, my appearance—that’s never been my moneymaker. I’m fine being small. I’m fine being all the things I am. And I’m happy I’m not supposed to be on the ’50 Most Beautiful’ list all the time, because that would be super fucking stressful,” she said.

What strikes me most about all of this is the fact that Anna Kendrick is absolutely gorgeous, talented and amazing in so many ways. How could anyone not only find her looks unattractive, but also find cause for criticizing her appearance so much she feels obligated to defend her physical form publicly?

Some people truly are dumb as shit. And I tell you what: if no one out there appreciates how beautiful and unique Anna Kendrick is, then she can come straight to me. I’ll make sure she’s treated as well as she deserves. And not a day will go by when she won’t feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. I promise you (and Anna) that.

This past June, 30-year-old Jeremy Meeks of Stockton, California caused quite a stir when his “sexy” mug shot went viral. He had been arrested on five weapons charges and one gang charge, but that didn’t stop women around the world from drooling over his “Hot Convict” image.

The fact that he’s a career criminal and scumbag didn’t deter them from swooning over him, in other words.

The 22-year-old model—who once appeared in Jet Magazine as their “Beauty of the Week”—was recently arrested for disorderly conduct in DeKalb County, Georgia. She was released on bond the same day, but that didn’t stop thousands of Internet admirers from offering to pay her bail. And when you see her picture, I’m sure you will understand why.

If this is what female criminals look like these days, then please victimize me next. I’m kidding!

Little more than two hours remain in the competition for Playboy Miss Social January 2014. And believe me when I say that the competition is both fierce and foxy.

Tina Mari (John P. Dunnigan Photography)

In the final event are two very lovely ladies: Tina Mari of Blackwood, New Jersey and Bobbi Hogarbome of Liverpool, New York. At the moment, Tina has a sizeable lead, but there is always time for Bobbi to have a surge of votes… and those votes could come from you.

Bobbi Hogarbome (Playboy Miss Social)

If you have the time and feel like joining the fray, then head on over to Playboy Miss Social and register as a judge for free. This monthly, non-nude social media competition is worth a closer look, I assure you.

Of course, the clock on the January competition is ticking, so please make haste and vote for either Tina or Bobbi soon.

There is a New Year’s superstition that claims what you do first in the new year is what you’ll end up doing all year round. Of course, this is a superstition for a reason—mostly because it’s complete horse shit. I mean, seriously. Do we really expect someone sleeping off an all-nighter of drunken debauchery to end up sleeping away most of their new year, too?

No way—and I’m sure those “midnight masturbators” are grateful. No amount of hand lotion can protect against a year-long bout of self-love, after all.

Despite being one of the least superstitious people around—and even though we’re four days into the new year—I’ll ignore my skepticism and try tobelieve this blog post will dictate how 2014 will be for yours truly. Yes, it’s wishful thinking, but can you blame someone preparing for single life again—especially a hot-blooded, heterosexual male like me? A man can dream.

Given my deep love for women—and even though my mother will likely curse me for doing this (she’s worried about what people might think, which obviously concerns me very little)—I want to pay tribute to some of the beautiful ladies who make the cold, snowy days of winter sizzle with raw sexuality: SNOW BUNNIES!

I do ask that you not confuse this with the racial slur for white women—as in “that snow bunny had a big old booty”—but for some reason, all the snow bunnies featured here are white. I wonder why that is? Oh well, that’s a question for another time. For now, please enjoy this gallery of lovely snow bunnies—any of whom could easily warm even the coldest winter night.

And if my 2014 is destined to be filled with snow bunnies like these, so be it! I only hope I live to see 2015!

These days, few performers are as hot as Katy Perry. And where this California girl is concerned, the word “hot” applies in more ways than one.

I am absolutely in love with this gorgeous young woman. And despite liking Russell Brand, I have no idea what his problem is. He was lucky enough to marry Katy in 2010, but filed for divorce from her a mere 14 months later. Apparently they argued over starting a family and, as I understand it, he left because he didn’t want her “being the boss” of things.

What a dumb ass. She can boss me around any time!

Fortunately, this just means that Katy is available for smarter men to date—like singer/songwriter John Mayer, who’s had an on-again-off-again relationship with her since 2012.

He’s obviously no dumb ass. What happened to you, Russell?

At any rate, I decided to feature the lovely and talented Katy Perry in today’s post because, in my dreams, she happens across my article, loves it and immediately reaches out to me so we can start a friendship. Since I have a better chance of being appointed as the next Pope, though, I suppose I should be happy to have so many beautiful pictures of Katy to enjoy. Here are a few of my favorites, which I hope you appreciate as much as I do.

And if you are reading this, Katy, hit me up sometime. I’m no John Mayer, but I’m also no Russell Brand. Believe me.

Honestly, their primary purpose has always been as comic book “eye candy,” put there to appeal to the prepubescent teens and random nerds who form the target demographic. Before you start cursing me for referring to people this way, though, please understand that I am a comic book nerd from way back. I have boxes and boxes of them and wait anxiously for the release of every superhero movie, so I feel uniquely qualified to represent this imaginative—and sometimes pimply—population.

But I digress.

Lady heroes deserve to be praised for being more than just pretty faces and gorgeous bodies—which I assure you most all of them possess. Sure, some superheroes have earned their own comic book titles—like She-Hulkand Wonder Woman—but it isn’t the same. Somehow when you read those comics, you can almost feel their intended purpose: to pull in the few female comic book nerds out there and once again to convince horny little geeks to buy comics filled with their favorite sexy lady heroes.

I’m still waiting to see a title featuring a tough, no-nonsense lady hero who won’t take crap from anyone and kicks enough ass to attract readers from both genders. And who knows? A comic like this may already exist. I’ve been out of the comic buying game for a while, so I confess to being rather ignorant of the current trends.

Yes, female superheroes deserve much more than what they’ve been given—which is little more than admiration based solely on their physical attributes. And I wish I could say this article was designed to break that pattern and to spark a conversation about gender equality in the comic book business, but sadly, this is not the case.

I am a comic book nerd—to some degree—but I am also a heterosexual male who grew up eyeballing the same female superheroes who struggle for relevance today. I guess you could say this is my own “horny little geek” coming out… so sue me.

Hawkgirl soars in sexy spandex (DC Comics)

Storm can make every day sunny and bright (Marvel Comics)

She-Hulk: Sensational as always (Marvel Comics)

Spider-Woman can be a bit clingy (Marvel Comics)

Scarlett Johannson as Black Widow (Marvel Entertainment)

Rogue: No touching! (Marvel Comics)

Wonder Woman’s beauty started it all (DC Comics)

Invisible Woman in comic and film, played by Jessica Alba (Marvel Comics)

Skin care is an important issue for many, especially in societies where outward beauty is emphasized—the United States being at the top of that list. And to keep their skin young and beautiful, some people spare no expense and go to extremes most of us would never even consider.

If you are one of these people and either live in New York City or plan to visit soon, then you may want to swing by Shizuka Day Spa for their specialty: the Geisha Facial.

Geishas have been around for centuries and the tradition continues even today. For those of you unfamiliar with them, geishasare female entertainers and companions known for their refinement, education, conversational skills and, of course, their beauty. And they are easy to spot with their elaborate hairstyles, traditional garb and thick white makeup.

Enter the Geisha Facial—an effective way of removing makeup, dirt and oil from your face and leaving you with a clean, glowing complexion. Of course, there is one special ingredient that sets this facial apart from others, and it’s something you likely would never consider rubbing all over your face.

Bird poop.

You read that right, I’m afraid. At the Shizuka Day Spa, they add bird droppings to their Geisha Facial treatment since—believe it or not—that’s what geishas used to do, too.

Apparently, the seeds ingested by birds—in this case nightingales—give their feces an exfoliating quality. After being sterilized with ultraviolet light, the droppings are combined with rice bran and water to form a cleanser that is then applied to the customer’s face. The enzymes in the feces tingle when the mixture is applied, but supposedly brighten the skin and cause the “glow” for which most skin care lovers strive.

I see at least 100 facials here (Dr. Heckle)

Of course, customers have to accept the fact that dookie will be smeared on their faces and that to experience this, they first have to shell out almost $200—two facts that obviously don’t appeal to everyone.

“Ewww,” one woman said when asked if she would be willing to try a Geisha Facial. “I don’t think I want to try that. That’s kind of scary.”

According to Olivea Shure of Shizuka, however, nearly 50 people each month visit for a Geisha Facial. Some even return for a second treatment later!

Sadly, I live in North Carolina and we simply aren’t trendy enough to offer Geisha Facials down here. However, anyone in the area who might be interested in something like this should drop me a line. Since there is always bird poop on my car in the mornings, I’m sure I can find some to rub on your face… and for a much lower price, too.

Every month, the people at Playboy—that wonderful gentlemen’s magazine with naked women (as well as good articles, or so I’ve heard)—sponsor an online contest for models interested in building their professional portfolios: Playboy Miss Social.

Forgive me if I avoid the PMS abbreviation in this post, but it should be obvious why.

On the website—which you can find HERE—Playboy Miss Social is described like this—and please note that I pulled some information together so no one would have to go searching for it:

A monthly non-nude social media competition; contestants compete against one another through daily and weekly Challenges that exist on this site and across various social media channels like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. Contestants earn votes by winning challenges and are also awarded votes by Judges throughout the month; competition starts the first day of the month and runs through the last day; the first 3 weeks are the Open Round while only 12 contestants advance to the head-to-head, tournament-style finals; prizes are given for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place contestants—1st place wins a trip to Playboy’s L.A. studios for a photo shoot with a Playboy photographer, a tour of the Playboy mansion, the title of Miss Social for that month and the opportunity to be part of the Playboy family.

Aneta can take your breath away (courtesy of Aneta Kowal)

Anyone can be a Judge—all you have to do is register for free and start perusing the site. The more you interact with the features you find there, the more votes you earn and can then bestow upon your favorite models. Votes are also available for purchase—if you’re someone with money to burn, I suppose—but I certainly don’t qualify. And honestly, free votes are just fine with me because I also get access to pictures of beautiful women. Lots of beautiful women. Believe me.

To be eligible as Contestants, interested ladies who are 18 years or older and have never appeared in a Playboy publication—or online affiliates, for that matter—simply have to register, post some pictures and a little background information, and start marketing themselves through social media. And if they fall short one month, they always have the next month to look forward to, which means the loveliness just keeps on coming.

Of course, one of the most beautiful contestants on the Playboy Miss Social site also happens to be an online buddy of mine: Aneta Kowal. Check out her official blurb, which appears nearly everywhere that she appears on the web, but most notably on her own website, www.anetakowal.com:

Aneta Kowal is rapidly becoming one of Metro Detroit’s most renowned models. She attributes her rising success to her relentless work ethic, professionalism, spunky personality, and unique appearance. Whether it is lingerie, swimsuit, glamour, fashion, club wear or beauty, she can deliver some jaw-dropping and captivating photographs.

If you doubt this last part, just look at some of the photos included here. And trust me when I say this is only the tip of the iceberg. Aneta has sexy pictures all over the place, but I leave it to you to check them out—preferably by visiting Miss Social and tossing some votes her way.

Sexy as hell (courtesy of Aneta Kowal/Nino Batista)

What I love most about Aneta—and what makes her so different from other models I’ve met—is that physical beauty is only part of who she is. Aneta is also a very intelligent, caring and thoughtful person, which you definitely can’t discover from a mere photograph. That’s why I decided to write this post about her: to show that in Aneta’s case, beauty is not skin deep; she is equally beautiful on the inside.

And even though this will sound like complete horse poo-poo coming from a hot-blooded, heterosexual guy like me, there’s something else that impresses me about Aneta: her unwillingness to pose nude. Don’t get me wrong. I love naked ladies as much as the next guy and would be lying if I said I wouldn’t enjoy some nude pictures of her. However, there is nothing wrong with leaving something to the imagination. And face it: once you’ve seen several thousand pictures of nude women—as many guys have, whether they admit it or not—enjoying some non-nude photos is a nice change of pace, especially when the subject is someone as drop-dead gorgeous as Aneta!

Incidentally, Aneta also responds to fans herself, choosing not to rely on some assistant or media specialist to handle it for her. This means when you get a message from Aneta on Facebook or a response to some question you tweeted during one of her frequent Twitter chats, you can bet that you’re dealing with The Real McCoy. Something else I love about her.

Hot isn’t strong enough of a word for Aneta (courtesy of Hooters/Aneta Kowal)

Now given her refusal to pose in the buff—which would undoubtedly get her into Hef’s delightful publication—the odds of Aneta ending up as a centerfold in Playboy are relatively non-existent—unless the magazine suddenly features clothed women or Aneta has a serious change of heart. And I’m not sure either is very likely.

As I mentioned before, I respect Aneta’s decision to remain at least partially clothed during her photo shoots, but knowing she will never be a centerfold saddens me a little, too. When I was a young man, my friends and I would steal Playboys from our fathers—those foolish enough to keep copies in the house, that is—and take them deep into the woods to examine and enjoy. Centerfolds were always my favorite because they not only featured a breathtaking model—free from the bonds of clothing and nestled in some simulated yet comfortable scene—but also had some information about each woman on the back. Things like their turn-ons, favorite vacation spots, dream celebrity dates, hobbies, interests… all sorts of stuff.

Again, you may think I’m full of shit, but I assure you that I’m serious, and I’ll tell you why: the details about each centerfold model meant they were real and, theoretically, attainable. Every word could have been fictitious—the ramblings of some hack staff writer—but I didn’t care. To me at that transformative age, they were goddesses. And if I played my cards right, perhaps someday I could be with one of them.

Bear in mind I was very young—maybe 10 or 11 at the time—so Playboy brought with it a sense of wonderment and joy that faded later in life. But I still remember the way those amazing and interesting women made me feel. And that’s precisely the feeling I get when I see Aneta. She may not get her centerfold, but damn it, I can make sure people know a little more about her. So my gift to Aneta—my centerfold without a centerfold—is a back-page profile to go with her gorgeous front.

Aneta also has an incredible 2013 calendar—check out the little preview on the left—which is available for purchase HERE. And trust me when I tell you it is worth the tiny investment.

So there you have her: my pal and a beauty to behold, the lovely Aneta Kowal. She truly is an amazing person and I hope you’ll consider visiting her profile on Playboy Miss Social, registering as a Judge and voting for her. The June contest is coming to an end, but with your help, this could be the month Aneta reaches the winner’s circle!