Vast Right Wing Conspiracy Part Duh

Apparently suffering the long term effects of habitual Botox abuse, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi again defied the grounding gravity of logic to concoct a thread bare story trying to tie Wednesday’s contempt of Congress proceedings in the House of Representatives to unproven allegations of voter suppression.

“It is no accident; it is no coincidence that the attorney general of the United States is the person responsible for making sure that voter suppression does not happen in our country, that issues that relate to the civil liberties of the American people are upheld.: These very same people who are holding him in contempt are part of a nationwide scheme to suppress the vote.: This is part of the scheme that the right-wing over-the-edge – and I don’t think that all Republicans subscribe to this – but the over-the-edge gang, which dominates the House of Representatives.” said Pelosi in her weekly news conference.

Revealing yet another portion of the chamber of horrors that is her power obsessed mind, Pelosi channeled Hillary Clinton, experiencing a vicarious flashback to Clinton’s infamous “vast right wing conspiracy” moment.

Never mind that there are hundreds of Mexicans and an American Border Control Agent dead as the result of sophisticated automatic weapons ending up in the hands of known, hardened criminals.: It should not matter to voters that this is a result of the current administration’s irresponsible, scandalous Fast and Furious gun walking operation.: Finding out how that happened and who is ultimately responsible for those deaths is not important.

Changing the subject to a fabricated conspiracy theory that attempts to put Republicans on the political defensive, while distracting from “progressive” failures in both the Executive and Legislative branches to address the very real economic problems in America is what matters.

Actor Morgan Freeman has said the effort to clean up voter fraud is all about disenfranchising minority voters: “My point is that women, Hispanics, blacks, there is a large attempt, a great attempt, at disenfranchisement. I mean, it’s right out in the open. I’m not, you know, this isn’t like breaking news or anything. Why is that?”

Forget that in States where voter rolls have been more closely inspected the names of people dead for years, sometimes decades, are discovered to be still on those rolls.: Further investigation of registered voter information has revealed names registered at addresses that turn out to be vacant lots or gasoline filling stations.: Integrity, honesty, accuracy, ensuring that American Citizens retain confidence in the electoral process; none of those require attention.

What is important is to play the race card in a desperate attempt to invigorate sagging voter interest within the “progressive” political base.

If “progressives” are going to insist on continuing their smear campaign against Conservatives with innuendos and unproven accusations of voter suppression regardless of the facts; if “progressives” are going to protect voter registration irregularities at every turn, then Conservatives should start fighting fire with fire.

Since it should now be painfully obvious that partisan “progressive” political interests trump voter integrity, Conservatives should quit crying foul and get in the game.

Conservatives, especially those racist, violent right wing extremists in that fringe radical Tea Party movement, should coordinate with their oh so close, bosom buddies and deep pocketed financiers, the Koch brothers, to fund the importation of millions of Conservative voters from around the world into America.: “progressives” “know” that those evil Koch brothers have enough money to buy the planet several times over, so the funds required to finance such a move will probably come out of petty cash.

Imagine the display of shock, dismay and angst amongst “progressives’ should the White House refuse to grant 800,000 temporary work visas to any of the innocents between the ages of 18 and 30 who through no fault of their own, were brought to America as a byproduct of the operation.

Should “progressives” cry foul over the illegal importation of millions of people who disagree with their “vision for America”, those protestations will unequivocally be based solely upon race hatred, as will all protestations presented against policy initiatives resulting from a Mitt Romney election to the White House.

If “progressives” demand that every voter identify themselves with a photo ID to ensure that Conservative illegal aliens are not using the names of dead people to vote in American elections, the obvious motivate will clearly be a desire to re-institutionalize Jim Crow style voter suppression that enjoyed widespread acceptance among “progressive” Democrats following post-Civil War Reconstruction in the south.

If the “progressive” candidate for office enjoys a slim lead in a hotly contested race, Conservatives should then file lawsuits demanding that “all the votes be counted” to buy themselves enough time to “find” a “somehow misplaced” box stuffed with provisional ballots that swing the election results in favor of the Conservative…then quickly move to have the counting stopped and the election certified.: Ideally, the result of the race would give Conservatives a filibuster proof majority in the U.S. Senate and allow full repeal of the contemptuously passed, ill advised, intentionally misrepresented, clearly misnamed “Affordable” Care Act.

That will be a good first step towards leveling the playing field.

Now can we finally get back to what matters most to the majority of Americans, like where and how to find a job?