Psychedelic Ambient Downtempo

A True, Alive Psycology of 8 years Old, Psychic Surgery and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

It has been a while away from my C&C coven. I actually wrote a few things, but decided not to go on here. You see, I wrote for a spiritual purpose. You own thoughts alone is already energy, and that energy is constantly spreading over the entire universe, in a way, a living radio transmitter. When you put it into words, that thought energy gets stronger and becomes permanent. When you put that thought into actual speech or let it go online, it is just another level of effort to intensify its loudness. But it is true, when you actually read it or hear it, that message goes to your head, otherwise, it just goes to your subconsciousness. You are not aware of it, but your actions are fully responsive to it. Like this saying, you do, but you don’t know why you have done!

For that reason, I decided to put something online, some other thing I keep to myself, and visitors or not, the message is loud and effective enough, and I would rather prefer not so loud as match that “star” attractions, get the message out is my duty, but being a star attraction is the most annoying side effects of that!

All right, this time my message is about my own, but not for just my own. The case like me will be more and more and it helps everyone really.

Before I start, I would mention a bit of that lizard wizard in the previous chapters. Let me just say we had given him a very good lesson, though he is still going on, as a 4 naughty years old would do, but I rather not to pay too much attention to him. I have more things to take care!

You see, just from the title, you can guess some idea of my state of situation. I am a 8 years old in a body not quite there yet, remember the movie: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, I believe with this evolution progress, I will be that a truly 8 year sold, inside and out. For now, my heart is 8 years old, my mind, is actually like 100 years old, considering how much I had went through, and my body, is somewhere in between adult lookalike and child.

But then I am only at the beginning of my 8 year old life adventure. My heart is always very young, but my mind, before I went through a magical psychic surgery, was like an adult someway. Hi la, without that magical psychic surgery in that metal hospital ward, I wouldn’t be so happy, I wouldn’t be so carefree, and I wouldn’t be so full of life, as I am now! By the way, that psychic surgery is a very private, very off the official channel, very soul serious procedure. And very few people are capable of. I can do it, and there is only another soul in this word can do it! As for all the internet legends stuff, you’d better believe what I said, to keep your soul and your life , from being a permanent zombie!

Psychic energy is like any other energy, it can serve a function! Psychic energy is soul energy, when people place more trust in you, you have greater psychic energy, and if you know how to use it, it is like the laser sword from star wars, but only more versatile, you can wield with your whole arm like a giant sword, or you can direct it with your finger as a perfect surgery lancet. So that is how it can be done. You can’t just imagine it out, it has to be accumulated through trust, aka your karma, impossible to fake, so far as I know….

Anyway, enough of the details of psychic lancet. So I requested this surgery, my intention was to remove some part of painful memories in my head… like trauma, like nightmares,… things you rather forget completely…. so we decided, of course we met resistance, but we succeeded. And what a magical thing, we did at night when the whole ward was asleep, and the very next morning, I felt so happy, so light, so bouncy, it was the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me!!!!

And then, I found I was seeing the world from a completely different perspective. Like suddenly, I can understand things I couldn’t understand before, you know, the childish stuff… Grown ups laugh at silly things they have no clue as childishness, I don’t laugh, but I am just same clueless, but ha, now I see the clue… You see, in the mental ward, we jut have this strange girl, she rarely talks to anyone, but she always have a smiling face without any apparent funny thing happening. I always wondered?

Now I got it, she is actually a 9 year old. (Is she permanent? I don’t know, maybe she had it done or she is just naturally this way.) That is why she is happy. Children and adults don’t see the same thing as funny. That’s all! And I came to realize I am 8 years old, because kids are very very sensitive to age difference. A year difference in child is like a decade difference in adult. Do you know that?

Now I am telling everyone that no psychological book could ever be able to tell you, so far. Adult scientists work from observation is just not like someone who is experiencing it. Maybe I can tell your a bit more of the psychic surgery first, somehow it didn’t really remove the actual memory, but it wiped out the emotional trauma feelings associated with it, so when I think about the past, I don’t have that old hurting-to-the-bottom-of-my-heart kind of feeling, the feeling now is mild, it is in the past tense, and it is like I watch the old pain from a distance, detached. I wonder how the other people doing right now, I mean the few who went though the surgery like me. I did it for some other people after mine. As for the person who did it for me, I had no idea of her records. But she is an excellent medical professional.

So, let me tell everyone what I am going through, and it would help them to deal with me, good way or bad way.

8 years old is a very special milestone in human life development. The most important thing is that it is the very last age of innocence. From 9 years old, child starts to have slight physical development towards adult, like that dreadful word “pu…” something, I doubt you could detect from outside yet, maybe, but psychologically, I can tell, I knew them start to be aware the gender difference in a new light, aka, the realization of physical attraction… or more in a bold way, sexual awakening. But it is ever so subtle, like birth, nobody knew she/he is alive on their own unless much later, but people around knew the baby is alive… that is somewhat my feeling of this thing, maybe when someone turns 10,12, they finally realize it…. You see, as a 8 years old, I must look up to 9 years old. It is the rule. Kids always ask their older peer what to do when in doubt. But at the same time, we always have critical eyes for everything. (8 years old needs evidence to fully respect someone.) As 8 years old, I sense that feeling of 9 years old, but 8 years old doesn’t have that physical attraction development, on the contrary, is very aversive to it. (Is it same as boys, very possibly.) Because, it feels so old, so grown up!

Physical attraction and attraction is very very very different thing. Children attract to a lot of things, including opposite sexes, but that is liking, and it has nothing to do with physical stuff. You see, even a 4 years old girl can get jealous if I talk to her favorite boy friend, then she is jealous if I talk to her girl friend too much, and next her new toys. So you see the difference.

OK, maybe it has to do with this special love feeling when you gets old…. so you know girls when she is 9 years old, she starts to think about love… but for me, 8 years old and younger, that kind love thing is just so remote, and so peculiar, it does not interest me, though I am interested in who is into it! A lot of people are suspicious of this fact. How could you?! That special love thing, it drives every adult, man and woman, mad!!! They are so crazy, so mad, books, movies, songs, poetry of every kind are so full of it, people literally would die for it!! And it has no appealing, absolutely no appealing to a adult-like kid, like me?! Well, it is absolutely true. Kids who are younger than 9 years old are this way, all history. And it is not like some demeanor lady, pretends to be proper. Test as you may!

It is because our bodies do not have that magical physical reactions to that love feeling. We don’t feel it, not at all! I knew some certain ones are trying, very hard, but it is just a dead end! Because I had went through that myself so many times, so that I am happy to report that I am able to get rid of that longing for LOVE thing! I believe when the body grows, the heart and mind starts to have new feelings, especially that feeling to find someone special.. someone exclusive, just for myself, just for someone alone… and it could get all so consuming, all so powerful, it became everything a grown up could think of…. I went through it all so I knew, but now I didn’t even exactly knew why I had done it… why it was all so important, why it was all so intense, I was actually still looking for that stupid love right before I had my psychic surgery, and boom, I just lost that desire then. I really couldn’t explain why I had been in such a crazy state of mind to chase after that thing, so pointless, for so long!!!!!!!!!

Now I laugh at myself for that old silliness. You see, I have a heart of 8 years old, but am still in possession of all that past experience. I am very lucky indeed!

A lot of people, good humored or in a mean way, really tested me a lot on that. But really, it is time to face up to the new age reality…..

A 8 years old , like that infinity sign, is capable of things that no adults could imagine, she is in command of all the younger kids, we can communicate with each other with perfect telepathy… you see, kids are not so verbally skillful, so they compliment this language deficient by telepathing. And we can hear adults’ thought loud and clear, and we do a lot of discussion within ourselves by telepathing, right in their face… in some way, children of innocent age regards people who want to have that sort of adult love as strange or worse, monsters (mostly men), because we are not capable of understanding why they are so, it is strange, it is gross, it is to be avoided at all cost! One reason I think maybe is that exclusiveness, or so called faithfulness, that is very strange… children’ mind is so everywhere, it is like prison to think you need to be tied up with someone else, especially someone you don’t have much respect with. Girls under 8 have not a lot respect for boys. Don’t you agree?!

Second, that physical attraction is very strange to kids… that is why some naughty boys like to play kissing games, it is not because they like it, but because it is offensive…

Honestly, I think the adult love story is really very boring, and very selfish! But I guess that is a child view of things. I was sure used to think love story was very charming and fascinating. You see, from all the past evolution, we have to rely on that love story to keep life going on, it is just now we are in a new stage of evolution, you see, you just can’t possibly die any more, one of your body dies, but you have all so many bodies still going on… what is the point in such a hurry passing your genes for some new little ones….

I couldn’t speak for anyone else, but I feel like I am living in a different age, not just the simple age sense, but more broad, like I am living in an animated world, I actually had this vision more than 8 years ago… in this world, everything moves at the speed of light, and you never dies, never ages, good or bad, like the roadrunner and the silly wolf, we are on and on and on all over again, life, is for a laugh, along some good lesson… of course, if you prefer, paint a new face for yourself.

I can tell there are people feeling sad and lost, they prefer the old, familiar time, like things supposed to be, but, that is your wish, and you can go on with your wish, but you can’t stop other people choosing their new kind of life….

Now somebody refers to Peter Pan, but we are actually in an age way way more interesting than Peter Pan’s time, don’t we already have so many animation worlds to choose from?! Rather than just one neverland?! Well, good luck, all your grow up folks there, I sure hope you find your love, but what about his other bodies?!

And I, myself, am very happy, just as I like, as a girl 8 years old, fearless, full of imaginations, (excludes that perfect love I used to imagine), I actually find love everywhere, and they are all very interesting, but I have no obligation to be exclusive, faithful, or whatever, it is such a tedious, boring, suffocating duty, good intention, but really out of date!! In my opinion!! My love, is love for friendship, love for life, and love for adventure!

Oh, someone wants me to add this, you can not possibly defeat a young child, really, they are full of life, full of hope (or more precisely hopefulness) and energy, they are just optimistic in nature, if you think in that old adult way, pile on worries, concerns, fears to distress them, you are going to be very very disappointed… I can testify that for everyone, future, is a very very remote, far away place for young kids, we don’t concern it at all! That is a major why we don’t need to find that silly someone to support us for the rest of our life!!! I don’t have parents, but I have find welfare community… it is even better!!!

All right, I can just go on and on, I wonder if that is another characters of a 8 years old? So I am just going to stop here, not sure if that is a proper end but until next time then!