318. Master Kayla. She no longer submits?

KAYLA IS A MASTER
Kayla is a cunning linguist, a master of many tounges, and a master debater. Yes, she has mastered many things. And now it’s official!

We attended Kayla’s Commencement Ceremony regarding her M.B.A. She is done with her formal education and is preparing to enter her adult working life. But not quite yet!

When she first moved in with us over two years ago we felt that she might be with us up until she graduated. We initially looked at our relationship with her as being a chapter in her life that she would want to end and graduating seemed like a good ending point.

Of course, we all ended up madly in love. She totally meshed with our entire household vibe as well as my marriage beyond what we could have envisioned. About a year ago we talked about our future together. She made it clear to us that her desire was to stay a part of us with no arbitrary end date such as graduation, a birthday, or whatever. She feels like a permanent part of us. And we agreed 100%. We really are three. That led to our ceremonycomplete with a ring for Kayla. We are in a long term committed relationship. Period.

However, our situation requires meaningful, honest, and realistic discussions about what we want, both in the near term and in the long term. We don’t speak of our relationship as “forever” as that seems unrealistic and unnecessary. Mike is going to be 51 soon, and I’ll be 50. And it’s not that age by itself matters, it is that life experiences matter and Kayla (24 in case you forgot) deserves experiences outside of what we can offer her.

Kayla admits at some point she may want to explore those experiences, but at the moment she can’t imagine that time. She agrees it is probably “out there somewhere” but at the moment it is nowhere in sight. She hates talking about the possibility of it and that’s the end of the conversation.

KAYLA THE MASTER STILL SUBMITS
Oh, and as for the tease in my title. Kayla is as submissive today as ever. She is Mike’s submissive in ways that go further than my submission. It’s hard to quantify, but I would score our potpourri dynamic like this:

Me and Mike: 44% DD, 40% D/s, 10% M/s, and 6% BDSM,

Kayla and Mike: 10% DD, 35% D/s, 35% M/s, and 20% BDSM.

Honestly, I probably should score my DD a bit lower, but I find comfort in scoring it the way I did. I think I like to believe it is still mostly rooted in Domestic Discipline, even though there is definitely a bigger Dominant/submissive and Master/slave element than ever before. Hey, I can self-identify however I want, so leave me alone! Hee-hee.

My point is Kayla is the more submissive one. I struggle with the right term. The more “subjugated” one? No, that doesn’t fit. That has a connotation of “conquest” which clearly doesn’t apply. Mike did not conquer either one of us I believe we each forged a dynamic with Mike that has liberated us. Liberated from the thoughts and behaviors that truly enslaved us and truly subjugated us. Kind of reminds me of one of my fav posts, Post 30. I found my Thrill.

Consider that paragraph a mini-rant! Ha! I haven’t ranted about submission in quite some time. There was the October political rant, but it’s probably been more than a year since I last ranted about my journey. Maybe next post? I know some of you are like, “Jen, how about making it yet another year before your next rant? Well, too bad. It’s my blog and I’ll rant if I want to.

GRADUATION GIFTI think somewhere in here I shared that when Kayla first moved in with us she was paying us rent. While she worked an on-again/off-again part-time job, her dad sent her a check each month to help her out so she could focus on school without having to work much. He committed to doing that until she finished her MBA program. Also, both her parents committed to helping her pay for school. Thankfully they didn’t end those commitments when she moved in with us.

We combining our finances at her request, I think about a year ago. It was part of fully committing to us being three. I posted about how we handle our finances in Post 181. Domestic Financial Discipline. That was prior to combining Kayla’s finances. It basically still works the same way in that any money she received went into the “Bills” account and Mike determined how much would go into our “Day-to-Day” that she and I shared. (It’s called Day-to-day, but it’s not a daily allowance. You’ll have to read Post 181 for how it works).

Money can often be a point of contention, but it never has with us. Kayla liked the arrangement as it made her feel more of us being three. She still had money to spend but was equally accountable in making sure we stayed within our jointly allocated amount. If exceptions were needed, whether she needed it or I did, we would talk to Mike and he would decide.

What Kayla didn’t know (but I did), was that any amount she put in was actually not changing what Mike was putting into our Day to Day account. Instead, he was putting it into a savings account he set up. We really didn’t need the extra income and when she did have a few exceptional expenses (new car tires), unbeknownst to her, Mike just covered them with our money. All along Mike planned to use all the money she contributed to our household as a graduation gift to her.

She has given us money for 29 months. And Mike threw in a little extra to make it a nice round number. Let’s just say her graduation gift from us is allowing her to replace her old and dying car with a new one with a little to spare! And as that gift really didn’t cost us anything, as we looked at it as the money we didn’t need, on top of that we told her we would pay for a trip for her and a friend to go anywhere in the U.S. Kayla is planning a trip to NY City for her and Chelsea.

KAYLA’S KINKKayla’s age play (Post 279) has evolved over the last 8-9 months. She has “aged-up” if that is the right term. That is, she’s gone from an almost infant like play to more toddler play. It’s not something she gets to do very often because of J in the house, and we find her some play time whenever we can. A few times we have had visits from Nurse Ann to partake in both Mike and Kayla’s nursing desires. Other than that, it’s been pretty much kink as usual. She is much more into being restrained (tied up, shackled, etc) and lives for sex with two men at once (sometimes three).

She has tremendous energy and is totally committed to Mike, always looking to serve his every need. Wait, he’s a man, there is no “every” need. There’s just the “one” need. As they say, every woman wants one man to fulfill her every need, and every man wants every woman to fulfill his one need. And in our relationship, we call that an equitable arrangement!

I am kidding. Just a little. Not much really.

WHAT’S NEXT
Kayla has a job offer and they gave her the option of starting now or waiting until August. At our encouragement, she opted for the August start date. So she has two-and-a-half months to be completely free to do whatever, whenever. Well, not whatever, per Mike’s moratorium, but who knows, Mike may give her a moratorium waiver as another gift. Sounds funny so I’ll just have to say it, “Hey mom, for my graduation Mike’s letting me suck some stranger’s cock.” Poor taste?

As for finances, she still plans on pooling her money with us, with two exceptions. One, she will have a savings account that she is to put a set amount into once she starts working that is her’s long term but no using it without Mike’s permission. And two, while the rest goes into our collective pot, there will be a nice increase in our Day-to-Day allowance.

And speaking of graduations, J will be graduating high school! About two more weeks of school left. I’ll share on my next post what we think his future holds. Graduating high school comes with a lot of emotion. It’s equal parts exciting, amazing, scary, anxiety-filled, and pit-in-your-stomach terrifying. And that’s just how I feel about it! As for him, he’s like, “No biggie, I got this.” We shall see.

When you have an extended family such as this, it’s so fantastic to be able to share things like Kayla getting her MBA – and please pass along my congrats to her for this amazing accomplishment and my wishes for more successes. It’s the sharing that means everything; all for one, one for all and, honestly, doing this in any other way doesn’t make a lot of sense to me.

Oh, he’s got this, huh? Famous last words. I remember all of my kids (yeah, including the ones I didn’t assist in being in the world) saying those words when they all graduated from high school and my words to them was, “Sure… keep thinking that and don’t say I didn’t tell you.” But congrats to J as well and I can still remember how I felt when I graduated from high school and, yeah, even telling my mom, “Don’t worry – I got this!”