funny (if not necessarily "passive-aggressive") notes from pissed-off people

We all need somebody to hate on

“Working in a university library, you get used to a lot of ‘quirky’ personalities,” says our anonymous submitter in Manhattan, Kansas. “So far, this is the only one that has decided to put pathology to paper.”

It used to be that young college students were weary of growing up to work in a cubicle farm. Cubicle is one of those words that sounds cold and uninviting. Pod just sounds goddamn strange. I hope I never work in one of those.

Um, no; archives are materials that document the past, such as photographs of Abraham Lincoln or letters written by Martha Washington. Libraries tend to hold on to them rather than dumping them in the trash after they’ve “put them in the computer.”

You also made the sexist mistake of assuming the person who left the note is a female.

Ah~ this is one of those people… when I walk by her pod, I will scritch my fingernails across her fabric walls and lean on her “doorway” when chatting with her pod-mate. Lucky me~ she’ll hate me so much she won’t even THINK of asking me to water her plants when she goes on vacation.

Oh, I can vouch for the fact that library employees–particularly FEMALE library employees–are mutha-effin’ bonkers. I’ve worked with women who forgo pod notes and speak to each other like this in staff meetings.

Sure, that’s what they ALL say! LOL! Actually, I guess that must mean I’m crazy, too. Except I try not to go nutso on people–either verbally or in any other format. I just post everyone’s business on MySpace, ha ha!

Well, call me a stickler for good old-fashioned Health & Safety, but is sticking containers full of water on a desk that contains a myriad electrical items and precious documents really a good idea? In fact, isn’t it some kind of violation of the workplace’s policy?

“Look, Boss, somebody’s done it again! One of my plants is knocked over, and there’s water all over the archival papers.”

“Gwen, remember what I told you about your pots?”

“Look, I know you don’t think ice pots are appropriate here in the library, but my orchids thrive best in a container of water only. But LOOK- my ice pot is all gone, the orchid is lying there on my desk, and there’s water everywhere!!”

“Gwen, just clean it up and use a plastic pot from now on. You can set it over there on the windowsill…”

Someone knocked my coffee onto my keyboard once. Call me crazy, but I took that as a sign that maybe I shouldn’t keep coffee next to my keyboard. I hope her archival documents were as easy to replace as my keyboard.

just because you wouldn’t do something to me is not a good enough reason why i can’t do the same thing to you.
that reasoning does not fly with me.
what if i’m just not a nice person and i enjoy knocking over pots of water just to make your life miserable?

I enjoy knocking over pots of water just to make your life miserable! I fart in your general direction! I wave my private parts at your aunties, you cheesy lot of second-hand electric donkey bottom wipers.

Do you speak with an out-rrrrrageous accent, too?

courtesy Monty Python. Please, French lurkers, don’t make a socio-political discussion out of this post!

I am with everyone who has said she should not keep plants in a fuckin library! There is nothing (nor should there be anything) in a library that is improved by the application of water, potting soil, or fertilizer. All things that are good for plants are not good for the microfiche, the books, the archival papers, and the french fries .

I’m willing to cut slack on this one. I’ve got a coworker who has absolutely no regard for my personal space and not only steps into my cube to talk with me, but sits on the edge of my desk! And once he had the nerve to put his foot ON my desk to tie his laces. WTF?? I not only told him directly to get the fuck out of my space, but then strung yellow tape across the opening of my cube with a sign saying “Dave-Free Zone.”

Yes, and if someone had taken a picture of that and mailed it to this website, it would be you who would be the target for the commenters’ ridicule. Yellow tape across your tube suggests you might be a bit of a headcase.

Nope, I’m not kidding. And yes, I told him directly SEVERAL times to keep out of my space before resorting to the tape. It required a physical demonstration and barrier to get the message through, finally.

Please don’t take this the wrong way, but the way you’ve described what you consider to be your personal space in your comments just makes me think that you have either an exceptionally small cubicle or an exceptionally over-inflated ego.
I, for one, hope the former is true.

It’s a standard sized cubicle. The problem was that he would consistently encroach in my personal space, and would not take it seriously when I would ask him to step back, get his ass and/or feet off my desk, etc. He would even stand in my cubicle space in order to talk with my neighbor (we have low walls). He came back from surgery a little while ago and for some baffling reason decided that I wanted to see his stitches! He does none of this with anybody else. I don’t think it’s too much to ask for him to keep a proper distance in a work environment. And he’s not exactly Brad Pitt, if you get my drift.

Ah, yes, Freud could have a field day with this… Maybe her latent penis envy somehow got transfered to some sort of botanical obsession, coupled with librarian prudishness, has led to an obsessive fear with anyone disturbing her “plants.”

“DO NOT REACH ACROSS MY POD!!!”, “…someone has already knocked …”, “…drenched all my …”, “I would not do this to you!!” … this person is clearly uncomfortable with an excess of moisture, anything leaning/reaching in her direction, and things staying on things. But, you can talk to her … IF you make an appointment. Just talk. No touching … due to sexual repression which has led to sexual frustration which is manifested in her plants which must not be knocked. So if you stay away from her pod altogether, her plants will be safe …
And, Georgia O’Keeffe would totally agree with the plant = naughty bits analogy.

Hey claw-I met a kid in school once that loved to ravage sheep. And cows. And chickens. He claimed he had screwed everything on the farm except the cultivator, and he stood on top of it and wacked off. Just a point of interest. He died at an early age. Some pod disease i think.

New York has the Big Apple.
Kansas has the Little Apple. (Seriously, that’s what Manhattan, KS is billed as for visitors.)
And it’s a really very pretty town … with a one humdinger of a whacko librarian.

In this case I know the person. This sign was up because her pod is right next to the elevator. People always disrupt her when she is working and nose around in her stuff while waiting for the elevator. Since this was posted the sign had to be taken down.