It’s true, accountants give out crappy, lame gifts. Accountants are not known for being especially creative people, unless it comes to cooking the books and then the MENSA scholars come out from all corners.

Just look at all the junk available out there. Coffee mugs emblazoned with Accountant? A t-shirt that says CPA? A mouse pad? Really? How do these companies even stay in business? People should be embarrassed twice – once for purchasing it and again for giving it.

Assuming an accountant even cares about the holiday (9 out of 10 times they are busy working), accountants may feel obligated to give their coworkers/friends a celebratory gift of some sort.

If it doesn’t involve alcohol, you can count on it being lame, unoriginal, and hopefully practical. Accountants think that giving trite gifts like desktop calendars, pens, or business card holders are respectful and thoughtful. Yes, it is respectful to give and receive gifts. However, to give something like the Old Farmer’s Almanac filled with useless trivia, that you can count on finding in the 80% off bargain bin a week into the new year, shows no thought.

What tasteless, lame gifts have you received from an accountant? Post your best/worst gifts in the comments.

62 Responses to “#19 Lame Gifts, What have you received?”

The lamest gift I have received is also my favorite gift just because it’s so ridiculous. I have a company-branded yo-yo. I have used it a time or two, but I can’t do any cool tricks with it like Walking the Dog or the Around the World. Now it just rests on my desk at home as a reminder of how appreciated I am.

I’ve also heard rumors of company-branded CD wrapper openers, but I haven’t been privileged enough to receive one yet.

i received a mini copy of the first page of the newest 10-K enclosed in lucite block for working a few 100+ hour weeks as part of a six-year restatement of financial statements. thanks, partner. i keep this on my shelf and remember an ari quote from entourage. “think of it like the holocaust – never again.”

We received “help whistles” last year. If you’re stressed and you need help, the idea is to blow the whistle. Apparently then, something magical happens, and your stress will be whisked away and all will be well. We have an awesome HR department for sure.

My best was an autographed night rider poster. It was hanging at my desk on a Friday morning. I mean the Hough’s autograph was likely fake and the tape holding it up soon failed but, it beats a vanity license plate that has CPA [your initials]. I mean do really want the outside world to know this? What kind of person really would? We are not exactly throwing touchdowns for a living hence a plate that says QB #5 or broadcasting a cool nickname like BIG DOG or messages like GR8TIMES. Nice blog.

Has anyone else noticed the recurring theme that lame gifts are often associated with the firms as opposed to accountants in an individual capacity? The most lame gift I’ve received from the firm is a bobblehead of one of the members of firm leadership. I don’t think current budgets/economic conditions would permit that type of expenditure in 2009.

I work on the periphery of the accounting industry and have amassed a collection of tacky accounting firm shwag on my desk. I’ve seen some truly wacky firm-branded tchotchkes in my day, including the giant EY calculator I will never in my life use until I lose my vision completely and need three-inch buttons, bean bags, a rubber Rubiks cube (that one is actually cool), etc etc.

My favorite? My SLGG magic 8ball. Now THAT is some useful firm branding.

Also partial to my Deloitte Silly Putty.

I dated an accountant once and he gave the worst presents of all: not a damn thing.

I got a red Swingline stapler from a co-worker, a la Office Space. Actually, not a lame gift at all as it is the best stapler I’ve ever had. However, the same co-worker gave a partner a “Best Boss in the World” mug a la The Office. What a brown noser!

My audit partner gave us key rings with EY logo on my first christmas in the firm. He gave us the exact same key ring on my second christmas in the firm. Last christmas, I left the firm at this point, my colleagues told the audit partner what they “dont” want to receive.

During the last economic downturn, my firm did not have enough money to pay out bonuses or other incentives. Instead, we got globes with little feet that, when wound, would walk across a desk. Sadly, mine was taken before I could make it to the office to collect it, so technically it was a gift I was given, but never received.

the ceo wanted to give everyone at the firm a pat on the back for working hard and bearing through a recent big change. we got an email telling us to look for our free gift the next day in our mailboxes. next day arrived with a company logo lapel pin. yeah, that shows appreciation – free advertising. they give this crap out at career fairs and trade shows.

My firm was going through a reorganization. The day it was announced, we all got small envelopes on our desks that said “top secret mission do not open”. Inside was a temporary tattoo. You might be thinking, that doesn’t sound so bad. Except, the tattoo was the new firm motto with a cartoon picture of a man and woman in business suits. The woman’s suit looked like it was designed in 1982 by someone who also designed school uniforms (i.e., long jacket, pleated skirt past knees, flats). A couple male partners applied theirs to their forearms, but the tattos didn’t stick well over their arm hair. Thanks but no thanks, I would rather not have that on my body.

Our partners used to give out gifts at Christmas to clients, and if there were any left over, they’d give to the staff. One year it was Virginia Hams, that had been boxed up for months. I opened mine up and it looked like a diseased kidney. The coloring was a greyish, brown mix. Some people at the firm tried them and said they tasted like s..t. Very salty. One guy gave his to his father in law.

I have to say that I give the best present TO my firm. I decided that every Christmas, I would take a vacation. Once all my vacation was used up by around mid-January, I would quit. Leaving them short handed with no real warning is my way of saying thanks for reducing our vacation, jacking up our health insurance, firing our most effective managers, and “forgetting about” our raises.

The trick in any good gift is the planning. Just remember that the real joy is not receiveng gifts, but hearing about how much your old boss “loved” your gift. Those are the breaks “man”

What about lame gifts from clients? A tax client gave me a miniature wooden covered bench with tacks in the bench, labeled “Hillbilly Tax Shelter”- a memento from her vacation. I attempted to decline on the basis that such a great gift could compromise the appearance of objectivity.

The best gifts received as an employee were fresh flowers on everyone’s desk every morning in spring and summer, courtesy of a senior partner who grew them. He gathered the flowers, then prepared and disbursed about 20 vases, before 8am.

The worst gift ever, of course during busy season, we had to work on a restatement during the super bowl. The manager on the engagement came in and gave everyone on the team (over 30 of us) a $3 rubber football from Wal*Mart. He was so proud of himself because he had to go to 4 different stores to accumulate the number of footballs needed. When he presented them to us, he said thanks for being part of his “Super” team. Let me tell ya it doesn’t get much better than that!

Big4 in China, last year and earlier this year, most of the staffs got a 1-3 months leaves-of cause it was non-paid . Some people used it to pass CPA or CTA(certified Tax Accountant), some people used it to find a new job, some planned a long trip, and some people complianted the whole time.

I would like to give my CPA a nice gift at holiday time because he has done a lot of excellent work for me this year. What are the circumstances where it might be unethical or inadvisable for me to give a gift to a CPA? Do CPAs have ethical rules about accepting gifts from clients?

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