Author
Topic: LAND OF SMILES (Read 7939 times)

We all know what LOS means. LAND OF SMILES, i think it should mean the LAND OF SPEAKERS, everywhere you go there's speakers, tesco, big c, pyb, schools, every one has a microfone. We won't mention party's, or salesvans with speakers on top.

Oh! i forgot the fairground illuminated buses.

So what do you think LOS should stand for or what would you change it to!

I will start the ball rolling with LAND OF SPEAKERS, feel free to add below. like LAND OF SEXYGIRLSor KF members LAND OF SILENCE.

1) LAND OF SPEAKERS

2)................

3)................

I expect you all to join in including jivvy who hasn't posted for a while. Hope he's OK.

Despite a Lack Of Stimulation and a certain Level Of Sadness, I must write a Letter Of Sincerity describing a Load Of Spineless Languid Obtuse Statesmen with a Love Of Speeches and Lubricated Oily Shoulders!

Hi sharon how are you, SEDUCTION is BRILL TT thanks for joining in, now where's ROGER.

if sowhat is Russian then I am Sharon, Marchioness of Dagenham Dock

That's the thing about the internet, you can be anyone you want to be. speaking truthful, i've always had my doubts about DAWN.(sorry dawn) But she is a regular poster and gives us a laugh. SOWHAT no pun intended

But if we were all the same i think it might be a bit boring so let them carry on.

How do you know TAKEITOR is not a monkey, you have to take his word for it (sorry takeitor)

I think COOLKORAT and TASER would give a good answer to LAND OF SMILES.... maybe they will when they have finished viewing the Pattaya aims to eliminate prostitution thread.

LAND OF SCALLYWAGS nice one. Well thanks for those that contributed to make this thread a bit of fun.

HERE is a nicely written piece i found on the internet, the writer obviously a farang and of Intelligence, has put a lot of thought into it.

If i'm correct in thinking the author is one of our members.

Many less fortunate farang outsiders can only sit on the side lines

To hold your head up high like a true Koratian farang , it takes a certain swaggering panache and superior overriding mental ability to over come the constant and ever present pressures ,that are frequently place on them by other less fortunate farang outsiders . The Koratian farang has the magical , some would say mystical gift to stand out in a crowd where ever he goes , the simple god given ability to attract discerning followers , who's only aim in life is to be seen with the Korat ''in'' crowd. Many less fortunate farang outsiders can only sit on the side lines and watch in amazement at a life style they can only dream of , the amazing city and all it has to offer the discerning foreigner , the numerous farang watering holes , where true Koratian farang brotherhood and friendship simply oozes out of the wood work ,the vast entertainment complexes , restaurants and sexual assistance establishments , just too numerous to name. Now one can clearly begin to see why the second largest city in all of Thailand , can and does attract a better and more tasteful class of of farang. The legend of the Koritian farang , is by no means a fairy tail scrawled on a toilet cubicle wall , but a real living breathing entity of true , loyal and discerning farangs , who have finally after years of the second rate ,decided to abandon the ship of the ordinary , and set sail for more calmer and quality waters. So its no little wonder that the Koratian farang gets a lot more stick than a well beaten soi dog, the farangs normally holding the sticks seem to come from the same old worn and tired circumstances , sitting in their cheap Chinese made copy La-Z-Boy's watching re runs of only fools and horses , tearfully reminiscing about the good old days, only pausing long enough to snap at the wife , get me another beer. Its a well known fact among the Koratian farang brotherhood , the best way to try and deal with the constant harassment from the less fortunate outsider farangs , is purely and simply a case of not responding , this subtle approach has worked wonders for Korat's Premier farang forum.

There is I'm told a mysterious belief among outback dwelling farangs , that once they have removed them selves from the flesh pot rash inducing cesspit city's like Pattaya , normally I might add at the parrot like insistence of their persuasive younger Thai wives , that once they have built that little pink painted bungalow on a surprisingly cheap parcel of family land , not too far away from the wife's family , they in their mind are about to settle in to a life of peace , quite and riley, that only a retired capstan lathe operator from Coventry can dream of . Then after the original euphoria of being away from the bright lights and all its worldly distractions takes a firm hold , sadly uncle boredom comes knocking at their door. As time goes by and the cold realisation that the wife's mother will not stop calling at the house on a daily basis, with the intent to again ask for a small loan or at least buy her loving daughter a brand new Honda PCX , here's where the need to null and water down the constant aggravation comes into play. The past idea of moving into the country side and getting to know real Thais , to blend in and become part of the local community finally starts to come un stuck. The stark realisation that their pink painted nirvana, has some how turned into a mini prison cell with curtains ,now becomes all to apparent , they have now lost control of the masters front door key. So what options are now easily accessible to this poor farang , well as they made the cardinal sin of using the last of their nest egg to please the little lady , upping sticks and moving on is out of the question , so what's next . Home life gets boring and the endless financial requests become thorns in their side, the once attentive and understanding wife , seems now more interested in looking for a lucky lottery number , or the price of gold , the local Thais only aim is to convince the farang to buy some barging land and plant a crop that for sure will provide un told riches. The on going donations made with that well known silly farang smile , and over the top wai to the village monk, only turn out to be yet another irritation when the said monk is spotted at the local phone shop , buying an iphone . So why not find like minded lost soles , farangs who for what ever reasons have like your self abandoned the bright lights for a life in rural pastures. In every small village there's a shack where these like minded farangs meet, its a beacon of hope that can easily be spotted from afar , a table surrounded by dishevelled older men , who's self respect, dress sense and hair have long departed , large numbers of empty Chang bottles stand upright like a badge of honour , the conversation leans towards her indoors , and her lying family and just how food from back home is sorely missed . The day passes in a blur , new found acquaintances become best friends and those irritating thought of home life and the wife's mother have temporally drifted away , its finally time to head home so fingers are firmly crossed and thoughts run through your mind that the mother in law has suffered a fatal stroke or at least left your house . You arrive home , feeling particularly parched , head straight for the large upright fridge, oh fu** where's all my can's of ice cold beer gone, where's my yoghurt's gone, like the proverbial nursery rhyme , the cupboard was bare. It soon becomes plainly obvious that you have had been invaded by the wife's locust family , slumped on the sofa , a distraught feeling of being all alone creeps over you .