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There’s one good thing about being such a busy guy. I have an excuse to let my blog sit here doing nothing for days on end. But there’s a downside too. If event blogging were a Piñata, I’d be the slow kid who’s stuck with a fistful of Now and Laters. By the time I get to it, all the clever angles have been covered. All the cool pics have been shown. All the news is old. So what does one do when all the good words have been taken? Throw in new ones, of course. I now present to you highlights from my trip to New York City, Mad Libs style.

“What?” I thought. “I’ve really been voted to be on the Unpardonable(adjective) Blogger Calendar? Get the tempura (noun) out of here! You are totally notarizing(verb) me!”

But it was true. Apparently, the internet thinks I am smoking dimply(adjective). Off to New York! What a mind-circularizing(verb) experience it was. Some random notes because I am too ambered(adjective) on weakfish(noun) to write anything seamy(adjective) right now.

So this is that it feels like to be a quarterdeck(noun). I was in an actual studio, with two awesomephotographers, and in that room were pecans(plural noun) that I could advertise(verb) whenever I wanted. Are you sure this won’t get on TMZ?

Thanks to their mad skills, they had me looking pretty vicarious(adjective)! I don’t like to counterbalance(verb) my own horn, so I’ll let Backpacking Dad and Amyintercept(verb) it for me. I stuck around to watch their shoots, as well as ChicShopperChick’s. All three were certifiably blinding(adjective). Like I would totally chronicle(verb) with them, you know? Well, maybe not Backpacking Dad. Ah, who am I kidding, even Backpacking Dad. Oh! Forgot. I also met the infamous NYC Watchdog. He's the galvinization(noun)! He had a Darth Vader hockey jersey on - 'nuff said. Also, as I was leaving, Katia was getting her shoot on. Ski goggles(not mad libbing) are hot.

Before this day, I didn’t really know anyone too well, but everyone was so polyhedral(adjective) that I felt totally barbecued(adjective). In fact, I even went glazing(verb) with Backpacking Dad, his totally cute(ok, so that wasn’t mad libbed either) wife Emily, ChicShopperChick, her sister-in-law and my friend Julia. I got so burbled(verb) that I ramified(verb) the cashmere(noun). Seriously, you should have seen me. Actually no, good thing you didn’t!

When I wasn’t disaccording(verb), I got to do some New York-y things. After 5 cabs told me to yabber(verb) off, I finally got one to take me to FAO Schwarz. They had a giant Lego Chewbacca. Pretty beating(adjective)tactical(adjective), dude! I was also able to enjoy dinner at Bobby Flay’s Bar Americain with my friend Julia. Transfusion(noun), yo… that man can consecrate(verb)!

Yeah, so you may have noticed I have no pictures. I was too impregnated(adjective) to take any. But if you go to hereyou can see all the behind-the-scenes pics other people posted.

Of course this would never have been possible if it weren’t for Jane and Sarah, who took a great idea and abdicated(verb) with it. Thank you both for giving me an experience I will never vibrate(verb)! And of course, I would never have gotten my barometer(noun) over there if it weren’t for all you readers who voted for me! You guys stashin’(verb)undulate(verb)!

I’ll keep you updated as to when the calendar will be available (you’ll be able to purchase it from here). And since my only goal is to get on Queen Latifah’s(famous person) radar so she’ll burl(verb) me, anything I earn from this will go to a worthy charity, which shall be named later.