Insecure Transcript

01x01 - Insecure as F**k

♪ Alls my life I has to fight, nigga ♪
♪ Alls my life I ♪
♪ Hard times like, "God!" ♪
♪ Bad trips like, "Yah!" ♪
♪ Nazareth, I'm f*cked up, homie, you f*cked up ♪
♪ But if God got us, then we gonna be all right ♪
♪ Nigga, we gonna be all right... ♪

Woman: And We Got Y'all offers after school tutoring, mentoring programs, community service, standardized test coaching,

Big Brother Big Sister, and just general filling in the cracks.

As youth liaison, I can assure you that whatever it is you need to succeed, we got y'all.

So do y'all have any questions?

Don't be shy, guys. Fire away.

Why you talk like a white girl?

(kids laugh)

Ha.

You caught me. I'm rocking blackface.

(chuckles)

(whispers) That's racist.

Any other questions?

What's up with your hair?

I don't know what you mean.

My cousin can put some tracks in it, unless you like it like that.

You rude. She African.

(kids laughing)

We're all from Africa, guys.

Absolutely. Let's stick to questions about the program.

(whispers) Sorry.

Is this what you always wanted to do?

Uh, no, but I got this job after college and it fit my interest at the time.

Wait. I just don't understand why these grown-ass men are still dressing like Kris Kross.

I bagged you looking like Kris Kross.

Okay, that was high school when I thought prison jeans were sexy, and you didn't bag me till college, f*ck you very much.

I'm pretty sure my jeans were still sagging then.

Oh. Well, I'm just glad your pants grew up.

♪ Show me you can biddy up ♪

♪ Let me see you giddy up. ♪

(cheering)

Yo, remember when we used to rap?

You still flow?

You know, I might actually still write.

You lying. You lying.

M.C.: All right, now. It's open mic night.

So you rappers, singers, get it off your chest, all right?

I dare you.

No. I'm... nope.

Come on, Iss. It was just your birthday.

You're never gonna have this moment again.

(exhales) You got this.

You got this.

What up, y'all?

(chattering)

You were polite.

Yo.

Isn't that your girl?

What?

(music playing)

That's your girl, right?

What the f*ck?

♪ Love rookie ♪
♪ She give them all the cookies ♪
♪ By cookies I mean pussy ♪
♪ This girl is kinda loosey ♪
♪ Dudes take her off the shelf ♪
♪ And they put her on credit ♪
♪ 30 days later, they return it and regret it ♪
♪ Used like a dishrag, dumped with a hashtag ♪
♪ I blame it on the pussy, that sh1t must be bad ♪
♪ Broken pussy ♪
♪ Broken pussy ♪
♪ Maybe it's dry as hell ♪
♪ Maybe it really smells ♪
♪ Broken pussy... ♪

But I just got out of a relationship, I think, and I-I wanna try being this new, different person, and you seem like the perfect person to be this new, different person with because you've always been my "what if" guy, but I... I can't just jump from one relationship to another because that's crazy...

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Relationship?

I'm not looking for a relationship.

Maybe... maybe I gave you the wrong idea.

No, you didn't.

That's good to know.

(doorbell rings)

Bitch, you still mad?

Bitch, you still trippin'?

(chuckles)

My...

Both: ♪ Girlfriend. ♪

If you don't get off of me...

Where is your bag? 'Cause I only see one.

It's not under your big-ass wrap?

♪ Bling, bling, bitch, do my own thing, bitch ♪
♪ f*ck a wedding ring, that ding-a-ling was just a fling, bitch ♪
♪ Bling, bling, bitch, do my own thing, bitch ♪
♪ f*ck a wedding ring, that ding-a-ling was just a fling, bitch ♪
♪ Wake up, li'l bitches, let me show you how to live ♪
♪ Hair done, nails done, keep everything did ♪
♪ Like Rihanna forehead bitch, you gotta think big ♪
♪ Don't let me catch you knocked up havin' that nigga's kids ♪
♪ You are not the wifey for swallowing nigga's kids ♪
♪ These niggas be doing bids, these niggas be in my fridge ♪
♪ These niggas be smokin' mids and thinkin' that they the sh1t ♪
♪ Am I a thot for lovin' Cîroc? ♪
♪ Gucci or not, I'm a cheat 'cause I got ♪
♪ All my hot girls with me and we ♪
♪ Dance around and bounce those titties ♪
♪ Dance around and bounce those titties ♪
♪ Dance around and bounce those titties ♪
♪ Dance around and bounce those titties ♪
♪ Bling, bling, bitch, do my own thing, bitch ♪
♪ f*ck a wedding ring, that ding-a-ling was just a fling, bitch ♪
♪ Bling, bling, bitch, do my own thing, bitch ♪
♪ f*ck a wedding ring, that ding-a-ling was just a fling, bitch ♪
♪ Eenie meenie miney mo, how many niggas is ready to go? ♪
♪ Down on a bitch for the Galaxy 4, 99 reasons why niggas ain't sh1t ♪
♪ 103 ways to suck on a clit, five ugly niggas drive they mama's whip ♪
♪ 13 bitches spit game in the Uber, took my weave out 'cause my real hair is cuter ♪
♪ Ain't texting him back 'cause the nigga's a loser ♪
♪ Got a big mouth, but your mindset is little ♪
♪ sh1t is not funny, the mission is critical ♪
♪ Talked to these hoes and I got them to switch on you ♪
♪ Talked to your mom and now she gonna sh1t on you. ♪