myTV38

Here is a look at our picks this week for programming on myTV38. See our program guide for the complete schedule of what to watch!

Monday 12/30 – 5:00pm

Friends“The One with All the Resolutions”
When the gang makes resolutions for the new year, Rachel might have to break her proposed code of silence after hearing about Monica and Chandler’s relationship.

QUOTE

Phoebe: My New Year’s Resolution is to pilot a commercial jet plane.Chandler: That’s great Pheebs, now all you have to do is find a plane load of people whose resolution is to plummet to their deaths.

Tuesday 12/31 – 6:00pm

Two and a Half Men“A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise”
Alan tries to date one of Charlie’s former flames, but can’t get over the fact that Charlie was with her first.

QUOTE

Alan: When you’re with a woman like Sherri, who is sooo gosh darn beautiful that you get excited just thinking about her… how do you… keep the sprinklers from going off while you’re still mowing?

Wednesday 1/1 – 7:00pm

The Big Bang Theory“The Lizard-Spock Expansion”
Howard thinks he finally found the love of his life, but problems arise when Leonard inadvertently steals her away from him.

QUOTE

Sheldon: Howard is employing a schoolyard paradigm in which you are, for all intents and purposes, deceased. He intends to act on this by not speaking to you, feigning an inability to hear you when you speak, and otherwise refusing to acknowledge your existence.Leonard: That’s just ridiculous! Why are you cooperating with him?Sheldon: I don’t make the rules, Leonard.

Thursday 1/2 – 5:30pm

Seinfeld“The Betrayal”
The gang heads to India for a wedding. Jerry betrays George by sleeping with his prospective girlfriend. Back at home, Kramer has to deal with a malignant wish about him.

QUOTE

Elaine: [Drunk] George knows that you slept with Nina; that’s why he was acting so weird.Seinfeld: How did he find out?Elaine: [Holding a miniature bottle enthusiastically] He “schnapped” me!

Friday 1/3 – 6:00pm

Two and a Half Men“That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother”
Alan borrows money from Evelyn so he can buy a Porsche. In order to pay his debt, Alan must go on an awkward blind date.

QUOTE

Charlie: [On the phone with Alan, who is trying to ditch his drunk blind date] … Alan, Alan, calm down, calm down! Listen to me. Here’s what you do. Take her to a crowded club, pin a warning note on her back as a courtesy to the next guy, and run like hell! … Well if you don’t want my advice, why’d you call me?