Forum » Topic: UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkathttp://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869
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sponge finger on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192986
Thu, 29 Aug 2013 17:32:52 +0000sponge finger192986@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>They have been debating this issue for 4 hours now - my money is on Sergei
</p>Psycadelic Squirrel on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192897
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 22:08:01 +0000Psycadelic Squirrel192897@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Like it Squudgey! Pic is great, just hand it out at your meeting and you'll be fine. Simples as that.
</p>GrumpyCat on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192892
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:44:56 +0000GrumpyCat192892@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>wot no badgers?</p>
<p>how refreshing.
</p>Squudge on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192881
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:18:31 +0000Squudge192881@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Thanks chaps - the picture took me twice as long as the article - consequently I haven't done prep for a meeting tomorrow. So there will be casualties.</p>
<p>I couldn't put my finger on what disturbed me about his appearance all this time. Then it came to me as I was stuffing chocolate on my bean bag.
</p>Wrenfoe on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192879
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:13:27 +0000Wrenfoe192879@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>The picture alone is worth every star :)
</p>FlashArry on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192878
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:09:18 +0000FlashArry192878@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Nice one, Squudge - take five stars. </p>
<p>I had to check out the Al-Assad picture - I thought it had been paint-shopped but that really <u>is</u> his neck. Freaky
</p>sponge finger on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192877
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 21:04:49 +0000sponge finger192877@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p><strong>ACE</strong>!
</p>Squudge on "UK hesitates after evidence reveals al-Assad is probably a meerkat"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=65869#post-192874
Wed, 28 Aug 2013 20:44:47 +0000Squudge192874@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>There was an unusual display of political unity between UK political parties earlier this week. Cameron, Clegg and Milliband were all in agreement that the use of chemical weapons could not be ignored and that military action against Syria could be justified. A Coalition aide offered "We cannot possibly stand by and watch the atrocities unfolding in Syria. Horrific images of children dying due to probable use of banned chemical weapons cannot be allowed to continue." He then handed over to an expert spokesbastard to advise on the legal and military aspects. </p>
<p>"This is not at all like Iraq. There, we had to speculate about weapons of mass destruction as a justification for attack. In the case of Syria, we found them already. We all saw it on the telly and enough independent witnesses backed it up so we knew it wasn't photoshopped.</p>
<p>What we <em>don't</em> know for sure is who fired them, but right now we don't want to get overly focussed on details. We mainly need to look well-informed as we resolutely stand shoulder-to-shoulder with the US, firing cruise missiles at the weapons. Also, the Navy are bored and frustrated to have been left out of all the best bits of recent ops.</p>
<p>Disturbingly, one of our scientific advisors has pointed out that firing high explosives from stand-off into a load of chemical weapons can actually spread the joy too far. Worse, the security agency has advised that we could not rely on the Syrians to only televise members of the regime dying horribly in makeshift hospitals."</p>
<p></p>
<p>This gave us some pause for thought, though not so much. The game-changer has been compelling photographic evidence that Bashar al-Assad might actually be a meerkat. Imagine the public horror if we launched a load of missiles at the House of Meerkovo on prime-time television." </p>
<p>In a decisive move MPs have been recalled early to The House of Commons to have a serious debate as to whether Bashar looks more like Aleksandr or Sergei. </p>
<p>The US government has dismissed the need to wait, as the meerkats appear to have implausible russian accents which simply strengthens the case against Al-Assad. 'Simples' spat an aide.
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