DAY 01

This is your fridge on Soylent.

I’m looking at a pint glass, full to the brim with a cappuccino-colored “food of the future.”

Honestly, I expected it to be a bit thicker. Maybe I added too much water? My first sip is a bit chalky. Not terribly unpleasant, and not unlike the variety of protein shakes I tried in my gym rat days, but there is definitely some grit in there. I’ll try the blender tomorrow, instead of shaking it by hand.

It definitely doesn’t taste chemical. You know how uncoated pills have that pharmaceutical, acrid flavor? I imagined Soylent to taste more like that. Instead, I find it palatable. Maybe a cross between oatmeal and rice pudding.

Actually, the consistency calls more attention to itself than does the taste. I guess that’s what you want in a utility&dash;focused food. Any sweeter or stronger in taste, and I would tire of it quickly.

Surprisingly, Soylent reminds me of Swedish fish… you get the flavor and texture stuck in your mouth and have to send reinforcements to get it out.

Halfway through the first glass, I become more worried about the volume. Will this stuff really fill me up? In an attempt to trick myself into being full, I pretty much gulp the rest.

No need to savor utility, right?

The level in my pitcher floats somewhere between 1 and 2 liters. Am I really supposed to survive on a few glasses of this shake-like substance every day? I expected there to be a bit more.

At around 1pm I feel a strange mixture of hunger and fullness. Have you ever been to say, a steakhouse, and gorged yourself on too much food, for fear of it going to waste? Then the morning after, your body is conditioned to be hungry for breakfast, but you ate enough in the previous night’s binge to justify skipping the next meal, calorically speaking.

I’m experiencing something similar now. I feel satiated chemically, but my body is still conditioned to cramming more stuff into my mouth at this hour. Cue dose #2.

Soylent is particular about their brand — as they should be. They have a nice logo, a slick website, well-designed packaging and instructions… but experiencing the stuff — from the first sip to the thousandth — determines their identity with customers. Especially if they want to turn them into subscribers.

The experience alone is novel, if lacking in joie de vivre. However, the unoffensive taste is something you’d expect IBM’s Watson to derive — an appeal to the masses. Instead, Watson’s artificial creativity conceived Bengali Butternut BBQ Sauce.