At the 2013 Cannes Film Festival, the coveted Palme d’Or was awarded to Blue Is The Warmest Color, a three-hour coming-of-age lesbian film. This three-hour French lesbian film beat out other contenders such as A Touch of Sin (by a CHINESE PERSON) and Inside Llewyn Davis! (Note: the most recent Coen Bros film is truly a touching meditation on masculinity, but!) In presenting the prize, this year’s jury (headed by Steven Spielberg) made an exception: rather than simply give the Palme d’Or to director Abdellatif Kechiche, the award was to be shared among Kechiche and the film’s two leads, Adèle Exarchopoulos and Léa Seydoux.

James Maitland Stewart forever plays the creep you can’t help but love (has there been a more terrifyingly romantic stalker film than Vertigo?). What’s more, he’s played some rather English sounding creeps. From the following list, can you differentiate between Victorian villain and Jimmy Stewart character?

JEN VAFIDIS: HI JANE. There is a new Taylor Swift album out today, and it is already totally undeniable. The first single is a #1 hit, the second single was #1 on iTunes within 10 minutes of its release, and Taylor has been teasing us via Instagram about these new songs for what seems like years. It’s only been a few weeks, but still. I love her, you love her, let’s talk about her.

JANE HU: When I tell people that 1989 is going to get me through the rest of 2014, I’m 100% not exaggerating. Even though the three pre-releases have really sent some MIXED SIGNALS about [...]

I get up a couple hours before I’m supposed to leave in the morning and I’ll practice piano. Sometimes I moisturize before going outside. I like grabbing whatever is closest to me—usually body lotion, which I take to mean can be used for the whole body, including face. Lubriderm fulfills the same function.

I slather myself with body lotions. It’s pretty easy and cheap, but it works.

Phil: Jane, you and I love a cappella, even though it’s not cool, it doesn’t give us any kind of cultural capital to love it and it doesn’t even give us a real sense of belonging inasmuch as neither of us are active participants in actual a cappella groups. But do we ever love it, and we’ve been talking about writing about how much we love it for years now. For that reason, I was ecstatic when I saw that The Sing-Off, NBC’s a cappella competition show had been resurrected for an abbreviated fourth season by professional resurrector-of-things Mark Burnett. Before we get into the nitty gritty of that [...]

Yesterday was the official release date for Midnight Memories, One Direction’s third studio album. Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Yessss!! No? Am I talking to the right demographic? It doesn’t matter. I’m here to talk to you about the important stuff, which is the music.

The music: holy smokes.

Our boys are still the same boys, even if they're now boys-verging-on-men, and they even helped write almost all the tracks on the new album. Let that sink in: it’s their very own words coming from their very own souls into my very own earphones.