Mini (finally) reveals the Coupe

But you’ve seen it all before, right? You know it’s the first three-box ‘helmet-roofed’ two-seat Mini. You know it’s 52mm lower than the standard hatch and is set up - like all Minis - to drive like a luxurious go-kart.

The range-topper is the 211bhp John Cooper Works edition, sporting a 1.6-litre turbo’d four-pot with 192lb ft of torque. 0-62mph takes 6.4 seconds and top speed is 149mph, while the range-topping diesel - the Cooper SD - boasts 143bhp, 225lb ft of torque and a 0-62mph time of 7.9 seconds. It also returns 65.7mpg if you drive with sandals made from recycled daisies.

The posh go-kart bit is manifest via body stiffening, traction control and an electronic diff, while you get the full complement of Mini options. And there isn’t enough space on our Internet to list them all.

To help you form a full-bodied spectrum of opinion, Mini has kindly jettisoned a great many pictures online for your perusal. You will want to look at them, because our spidey senses are expecting some form of reaction, whether that be hosting a jamboree in celebration or shouting furiously at your wallpaper.

Prices start at £16,640 for the entry level Cooper and rise to £23,795 for the John Cooper Works. It goes on sale on October 1. Now, click forth and explore, intrepid car hound…

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