Reis van Marcel

I knew it was going to be intense and magical at the same time. Totally unpredictable. A few weeks ago I was called by the frog and the vine and I quickly found the people who could help me.

I felt the blockade around my solar plexus. That lump of emotional energy was now becoming noticable, and it was preventing my internal energy from flowing naturally. The plan was to do Kambo before the Ayahuasca ceremony. Normally K is done after A, the kiss of the frog can be quite intense. After A, the body is totally relaxed but it was so arranged to do this in reverse. For the biggest impact. I went for the maximum 9 dots of poison. In Kambo tradition that is known as Completion. Later that day, I would meet with the vine that is the natural habitat of my little green savior from the Amazon. Wow. What a coincidence! Or divine magic.

So on saturday, my Kambo was coming up first. You need to vast for at least 12 hours before the ceremony. But I took some soup the night before. I totally felt at ease with this. My Kambo guider turned out to be a beautiful woman. Not some sunburnt Indian from the Amazon. I drank 1.5 liters of water and she burned 9 holes in my skin. Then smeered the poison into them. I felt the rush coming before the last hole was filled. It feels like your head blows up, the sweat breaks out followed by a deep cleansing wave going down through all your vains. My face became a little bit bloated. In Kambo tradition, that is regarded as a blessing she told me. Wow. I could only smile before I puked the bile out. That is what it is supposed to do ; clean energetically and get rid of the poison in your body. I then went to the toilet, and it was over in 25 minutes or so. All in all, it was a very easy experience. We had a nice conversation afterwards.

Ayahuasca brings what one needs. The instruction manual looks a little bit like this ; set an intention and go in without expectations. Surrender to Spirit, and you can experience the Unconditional Love of the Universe in ways you have never felt. Or you may meet the snake.

This whole weekend was perfectly arranged. I found a lady trained by one of my twin souls, Brazilian medicine man Mauro. She is of course a twin soul too and turned out to live nearby and would come to me at my house on saturday morning for K. Special K, what a breakfast! A couple of hours later I would go into A on location. That location turned out to be a cabin in the middle of a small forest. Again, perfect. I met with our guiders and soon all others, six travelers including this crazy old man.

Our guiders were a man and a woman. It struck me that the woman, who looked like an Elf from LOTR had a prevalent male energy, and this manly man who is an ex-commando carried a very female energy. Both strong characters, and one has to be for this work. There was balance on so many levels. Spirit loves both magic and irony.

We did the introductions by doing some exercises. Just to gauge each other. To test reactions to our personal energies. I had ‘read’ all of them at first glance, but now I could zoom in and make inventory of the damaged parts, and what was beneath those many layers of protection. I knew 2 of 6 were going in for a hell of a ride. The resistance in their minds was palpable. Hey, 2 of 6? No balance here…

We then grouped strategically on the cabin floor on our mats. Buckets. Three bottles of water for me. Plenty of tissues. Lots of fruit for afterwards, these ceremonies really suck the energy out of me. Check. It was all arranged by the divine commando. He was guiding this. That is his sacred role in this life, and others. I got sort of a center spot with plenty of space around me, but the commando did not know in advance about what was going to happen. I have channeled Unconditional Love during Ayahuasca ceremonies in the past and I need the space. And that was going to happen again tonight, I knew that.

We took the medicine and then tried to glide into a state of detachment from our 3rd dimension. You are forced out of body, and a few things happen. The trick is not to want to keep control. Just allow. Go completely blank. And you’ll be taken on a magical ride. Your consciousness will detach from 3D, and you can then investigate your past for those unresolved memories and process them. You cry a lot. Or sometimes puke, when you have a lot of resistance. I wasn’t planning to do that.

Ayahuasca is not about one single voyage, but two. Each traveler has individual aspects to investigate while the group travels upwards. That is what I do. I am the battery for the group. I know my special gift is rare. The divine commando had to help me a few times to regulate the energy while I was connecting, it is powerful! He was connected with the group on a higher level too. All my other lifes as various Shaman, Druids and other types of alchemists totally make sense to me now. So I prepared to take care of the group on this special night too.

I started channeling the love-energy for the group, and meanwhile worked on my personal blockade. It had to do with massive guilt from my youth, or so I felt. And about 1 hour into it, I sensed it starting to be released. I got my bottle of water and drank it all. Water eases the puking, hot tip! It goes so much easier. I then calmly moved my bucket in front of me. The music guided me with the most appropriate of sounds. It was perfectly arranged. And right on the apotheosis of that musical piece, it came. All the water came out almost clear but I felt it was a lifetime’s worth of resistance. Of myself! Holy shit. Total surrender. The energetic discharge was cleaned out with the water.

I heard them laughing in the upstairs department. Surprise! I assumed it was about some memory causing me to feel guilty, but it was all about me not totally giving myself over. Trusting the Universe. It never is what you think it is. They are still laughing while I’m writing this down. All the other Souls in the Collective Consciousness. All of them. They are also looking through your eyes, you know. Through your filter of the World. They are you, and you are what they thought up to be manifested in this dreamworld. You are perfect just the way that you are and you are being seen.

The rest of the ceremony was pretty familiar. It’s like a barrage of waves hitting a shore. And the stormier the sea is, the bigger the waves are. But I guided the energy into the room while I was processing my new insights. Offering it for the other travelers to take in, instead of forcing it to them. That was my one of the lessons for me. Universal Love is unlimited and totally free for those who wish to experience it. But the receiver has to make the choice to be open for it.

My sea is calm now. Ready for the next phase of my life. Now, a day later, more revelations are still coming. There’s even more transparency than before. My third eye and Anahata are fully opened. There are still surprises awaiting me over the coming weeks, I know that. But for me it’s healing time now. I feel all my chakra’s are connected and pulsating with Universal Energy. All pain is gone.

I got the message loud and clear. I don’t need to take care of anyone. I only need to offer my love and guidance when asked for it. It cannot be forced upon others. Each of us has their own lessons to learn. Look at your children, or nearest family members. They offer you a mirror. Look in that mirror, and see what they are trying to tell you. Look deeper. And together with them, you can resolve your pain.