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Life has been kind of hectic this past week which is why blogging has fell to the wayside, as usual. We have a big vacation trip coming up so I’m getting everything ready for that. Honestly, I am too exhausted to compose any kind of coherent text right now. My exhaustion is both physical and mental since I had the great idea to attend an Insanity class yesterday morning and now I can’t walk without hurting. So I am here in bed drinking coffee and eating oatmeal while debating if I should go to Zumba class or just stay in bed. Hence, a Photo/Thought Dump!

1) I can’t get enough iced coffee. For the record, the one I make at home is just as good (or maybe better) than Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts.

2) Everyone who knows me well is aware of the fact that I am not into sports, either watching them or practicing them. However, I can’t help getting excited over the World Cup and cheering for Colombia, who’s doing awesome this time by the way. I think it’s partly a childhood thing. I have fond memories of watching USA ’94 and France ’98 World Cups with all my neighborhood friends. Ah, the 90’s. How I miss that decade!

3) It kind of sucks when you’re off for the summer and your husband is not. It wasn’t so bad last year because my mom was here. And while I have plenty of things to do around the house to keep me busy during the day, sometimes girls just wanna have fun!

That would be a Bento Box from The Cowfish, a sushi/burger joint that opened in Raleigh last year. The sushi was awesome; the burger was kind of meh. I’ll definitely be back!

4) We went fishing for the first time last weekend! I mean, it wasn’t my husband’s first time fishing and technically I didn’t do any fishing. So I guess I should say, the husband went fishing for the first time in the Neuse River and I tagged along to take pictures and ask him to put the fish back in the water.

5) Ever since I turned 30, I have started to notice slight but definitely perceptible signs of aging. My eyebrows aren’t as full as they used to be; I have more sunspots/freckles and my eyelids are getting a bit droopy. Oh, well. Aging cannot be stopped and I am definitely not going to go out of my way to hide it, other than wearing sunblock and moisturizer.

6) Oatmeal! I cannot get enough oatmeal lately. This is one of my favorites ways to eat it: Raw old-fashioned oats, pineapple greek yogurt, banana and a little bit of peanut butter. Yum!

Believe it or not, when I am on vacation it is harder for me to get stuff done. I think it’s because when I’m off for the summer, I have this feeling that I can tackle any DIY project, complicated recipe or cleaning task because, hello? TWO MONTHS OFF! I have all the time in the world.

I guess that feeling of having so much time off brings out my procrastinating tendencies because I end up accomplishing nothing. Last summer, my mom was here so we spent a lot of time traveling and going on little adventures here in NC. However, as the first day of school approached last summer, I started complaining to J that I felt like I had wasted my summer because I hadn’t done anything productive. All I did was eat, watch TV and read. I’m not complaining because it was really restful and all, but that feeling of guilt for not being more industrious with my time was still there.

On Tuesday, J called me midday and asked what I was up to and I said I wasn’t doing much. Then, I got defensive and started offering explanations as to why I was doing nothing. It wasn’t like he was questioning my laziness, but I still felt the need to defend it. He then reminded me how much I had lamented my wasted summer last year. Alright, wise husband! I need to get my butt in gear and stop languishing on the couch watching movies on Netflix. I mean I’ll still be watching chick flicks, just not every waking hour.

I think one thing that has been different this summer is that I’ve been more physically active. I’ve been more consistent with exercise and, dare I say, I might actually be enjoying it now. I’ve also been trying a new approach with cleaning. Instead of choosing one day a week where I clean ALL THE THINGS, I’m doing one chore a day. That way, I can smile smugly as I watch four episodes in a row of Orange Is The New Black because hey, my kitchen floor is sparkling clean!

Yesterday I started with cleaning out the closet. I got rid of old clothes and shoes I wasn’t wearing anymore. Speaking of shoes, I realized my shoe obsession is getting a little out of hand.

The fact that I have three pairs of shoes that are almost identical except for the color is proof that I have a problem. I kind of hate myself for it.

Other things I have been doing include trying to redecorate here and there and experimenting in the kitchen.

I was a bit skeptical to buy that tray since I know chevron has been way overused for the past two years. However, I kind of like the contrast between the colorful flowers and the black and white. Also, it was very inexpensive and it makes a great tray for Sunday breakfast in bed. I would also like to decorate the kitchen/dining nook a bit more. We’ll see!

I made this Thai lemongrass rice noodle soup for lunch yesterday and it was the bomb! I only made one serving because I was experimenting so J didn’t get a chance to try it.

So that’s what I’ve been up to. Plans for today include watching Colombia play against the Ivory Coast at noon with a friend and then picking up a new bed I bought! Yay, consumerism!

Not really. I don’t actually believe your horoscope can tell you–to a tee– what’s going to happen in your life. However, four years ago I wrote something here that should lead me to believe otherwise.

Since I’ve been blogging more frequently this month, (I know I said I would do it daily but 4 times a week is good enough, really) there has been a higher influx of readers, some of which have been digging through my old archives. One post in particular got a lot of views. One of the paragraphs in that blog post got me thinking. Here’s what I wrote:

Now, my love horoscope was incredibly positive and dare I say, a little unrealistic. It said I would begin this year getting a lot of attention from men and that I would have so many men pursuing me, I would have trouble choosing one. HA! They explained that some lousy planet had been in my House of Love for a long time, but now it had finally left which meant total romantic bliss from now on. HA HA! My horoscope also foresees that by the end of 2010, my romantic life would reach its peak, meaning I would get either get married or move in with someone. HA HA HA! I don’t mean to sound pessimistic. But I find all that hard to believe. At least, for now.

So that prediction actually turned out to be true. Allow me to elaborate.

I was, for all intents and purposes, single at the beginning of 2010. That didn’t mean I wasn’t hopelessly in love, but that love was indeed hopeless, and so I made the decision to start dating. I had never really tried online dating and I thought I would give it a chance. I signed up on Match.com at the suggestion of a friend. While I had my share of dates that were a bunch of fails, I did find myself at some point where I had many suitors and I actually didn’t know who to go out with. I obviously chose to date the losers who were either not really interested in a relationship or the weirdos who were kind of creepy and had the personality of a rock. My enthusiasm for online dating slowly fizzled out and I gave it up.

Then over summer break, I made a terrible mistake. A mistake which many women have made throughout history over and over again: I got back together with an ex while I was on the rebound. It happened without me even realizing it was happening. And it was even more complicated because we were 2000 miles apart. But somehow I found myself in serious relationship again that was, seemingly, quickly headed for marriage.

Now, here’s the part when I want to kick myself in the proverbial nuts. A part of my brain, albeit small, knew that I was making a huge mistake by getting back together with my ex. But a bigger part of my brain was in denial mode. I was so desperate to find a way to get over that hopeless (failed) relationship that I was truly fooling myself into believing this new relationship actually had a chance of working out. I guess I wanted to simply replace the feelings in my heart, which now that I think about it, was utterly ridiculous.

One day, something clicked in my brain, and I realized that I was in for a world of pain if I went through with my plans of marrying my ex. Breaking up with him was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do. I felt like a piece of garbage for treating him that way. Many people got mad at me and hated me for doing that to him. I sort of hated myself a bit as well. But here’s the thing. I’m a firm believer that most people* who cheat on their spouses, at some point of the courtship had reservations or felt unsatisfied or unfulfilled with the relationship. I didn’t want that to be me in the future. I felt that if I went through with it, I was going to be miserable and make him miserable. I made the hardest choice but in the end, the right one. From what I’ve heard from mutual friends, he’s moved on and seems to be very happy with another girl now. That has definitely helped me forgive myself for making that decision.

In the midst of all that breaking up drama, I met the man who is now my husband. Granted our romantic relationship didn’t start right away. I honestly refused to give him my number several times at first. I was full of doubts and fears. I was afraid of falling in love and having my heart broken once again. I was afraid to put my hopes of happiness in a man only to realize it would never work. J was persistent though and didn’t give up. He never pressured me or anything but he sort of stuck around as a friend until I decided to give it a chance. And I’m so glad he did.

Going back to the horoscope prediction, my life did reach a peak at the end of 2010, although I was still a little ways from moving in together or marriage. That peak moment came when I decided to let go. Let go of what I wanted from love, let go of my expectations, of my illusions of perfect love. That was the first step. Letting go.

It took a long, long time for me to understand that indeed everything happens for a reason. That there was a reason for me to fall in love so desperately with the wrong man, that there was a reason for me to pursue meaningless relationships, or to try, in vain, to make it work in a relationship that was doomed from the start. All of those things have led me here. All of those things have made me the woman I am today. I understand now that J was the person I was meant to be with from the start. For this, I regret nothing. I am eternally thankfully for all the experiences I have gone through. I am also grateful for the other (two) men I loved before my husband and what I learned from loving them.

Not too long ago, I wouldn’t have been able to admit all this to myself, but I am strong enough now to do so. So I guess, maybe, horoscopes do tell the truth?

Alternate Title: The one where I give in and post a bunch of selfies of what I’m wearing. A few weeks ago, I photographed everything I wore during the work week just to see if I was rotating my clothes regularly. I found out I tend to wear the same thing over and over again while other pieces languish unworn in the closet. Here’s what I wore to work from May 27th till May 30th:

My laptop battery is currently at 25% which means I need to finish this post before it dies* because I’m just too lazy to go get my charger. So to make it faster, I’m doing weekend highlights, bullet-style.

I had a doctor’s appointment Friday afternoon which got cancelled at the last minute. That cleared my agenda for reading on my couch. J had to work late so I just ate leftovers and watched Netflix that night.

Saturday morning was the usual, except no brunch because I was going to a cookout/going away party later that day so I was saving room for that feast. The food was delicious and I tried some yummy cocktails.

On Sunday, we went to church, ate at our favorite Mexican place and then went to see The Fault in Our Stars. Yeah, I hadn’t cried that much at the movies since Titanic came out when I was in the 8th grade. While it was no surprise that I was probably going to shed a tear or two, I was really surprised at how much the film moved me considering the book hadn’t that same effect. Don’t get me wrong I enjoyed the book pretty well, but for some reason the movie was a bigger cry-fest for me. I would say don’t watch this movie if you are clinically depressed or if any of your relatives has cancer.

We had planned to go on a walk/run Sunday evening, but I backed out at the last minute. J went by himself but made it a short one. I decided, instead to do this strength circuit for arms that I found online while listening to trashy pop music on Pandora. It made my arms feel like jello. They’re still pretty sore actually.

Finally some photographic evidence because you know one of the rules of blogging is pictures or it didn’t happen.

* I apologize in advance for any typos as I am not planning to proof-read this post.

You might think that when a person moves to another country they have a million stories to tell. And I think it’s true because I think I could write a 10 page essay with all the things that have happened to me while I’ve been here. I’m not going to write a 10 page essay here, though. I’m too lazy for that.

I certainly don’t want to give people the impression that during my time here it has all been bad. Wonderful things have happened. But living away from home has been harder than I thought. It’s not just the being homesick part, even though that is one of the worst parts. There are so many major differences between the American system and the Colombian one. I suppose if an American decides to suddenly start living in Colombia, they would encounter the same problems I have encountered.

It was so difficult getting used to everything. Starting with transportation. Here, at least in NC, you must have a car. Not having a car is like not having feet. You can’t get anywhere without a car. To be able to purchase a car, you must have a driver’s licence too. And trust me, getting a licence here is NOT like getting a licence in Barranquilla. It’s almost like they give them away in Barranquilla. Leaving my house on a random Sunday afternoon to watch a movie at the mall was no big deal. I could either walk 10 minutes or take a taxi and be there in 5.

When I first moved to the US, I was living in a very rural area of NC. Don’t get me wrong where I live now is no metropolis, but at least I can get to the nearest Walmart or drugstore in 5-10 minutes instead of the 40 mins I had to drive before. Still, that is light years away from my life in Barranquilla.

Transportation was not the only issue. Food was also a concern, at least at the beginning. Everything tasted weird and after I ate, without fail, my stomach would start grumbling like crazy. There were many things that I didn’t like from the start like collard greens, kale, or sweet potatoes. Eventually, I developed a taste for the food and I truly learned to enjoy it. Cultural differences were also an issue at first. Silly things mostly. Like I would say something serious to a group of people and they would laugh as if I had made a joke. Or things that people said that were meant to make me laugh and I didn’t get at all. With time I have come to understand that there are aspect of one’s culture that simply cannot be explained.

I guess there is really no point for me to be writing about this other than to say, it takes time. It takes time to get settled in a new life when you are living abroad.

1) I’m really excited because we are going to watch “The Fault in Our Stars” this weekend. Before I read the book, everyone warned me that it would make me cry. Surprisingly, it didn’t. Yes, it was very sweet and sad story, but it didn’t move me to tears. I specially liked the dialogue in the book. It sounded much too grown-up like for a young adult book. I’m not saying teenagers are unable of having intelligent conversations but I was a teenager too, not that long ago, and I’ve worked with them for a long time and trust me when I say, most kids that age do not see life that way or have such deep discussions.

2) This week I fell off the exercise wagon. Monday started with a great Zumba class but it all went downhill from there. I blame (partly) PMS for this. I had a horrible migraine on Tuesday and cramps on Wednesday and Thursday. Today I was just being lazy. But tomorrow is Saturday, so that means more zumba and maybe some strength training. And then Sunday, a walk/run. I hope to do better next week!

3) We are taking a big trip this summer! And it’s going to be awesome! I don’t want to say anymore just in case someone in my family sees this and decides to use Google Translate. We are both counting the days! I know it will be memorable so I will take eleventy billion pictures and hopefully I won’t be so lazy not to blog about it all when I come back. I know we will make wonderful memories that I want to remember in detail.

4) One more week (and a day) to be done with school. Having summers off work has really spoiled me. I can’t fathom working over the summer now. I know I probably sound insufferable saying that but it is the truth. I was thinking the other day about my job in Colombia. When I was there, I was worked Saturdays, sometimes until 6 PM, and I taught summer courses during vacation time. I loved while I was doing it but now that I know the joy that it is to have two months off and both Saturday and Sunday off every week, I don’t think I can ever go back.