Andrea Peyser is not just some bitter and hateful sex fiend employed by the New York Post to stoke the fears and prejudices of the city's least literate readers; she's also an investigative reporter! What's annoying you today, Andrea?

Those kids protesting, down on Wall Street, ugh! Andrea ventured down the Occupy Wall Street site, intrepidly, and dug up a blockbuster: this isn't a real "movement" at all! Unless you mean "movement of farts, to pervs."

Like the guy who marched with a sign announcing that he was the "Fart Smeller.'' Say what?

"It's not a joke,'' he said, as serious as open-heart surgery, showing me a photograph of his important work. "I go up to women and ask to smell their ...''

I can literally feel pieces of wool falling from in front of my eyeballs. Here I'd thought that movement was about class consciousness or something. Come to find out it was one big excuse for perv fart man to smell more farts!