Natalie Portman in "Closer"

While Mike Nichols is probably hoping that people will be paying attention to "Closer" come Oscar season, it's already achieved legendary status as the vehicle by which Natalie Portman's signature prop became a stripper pole instead of wacky headgear. If you don't want to sit through all that talking just to watch her shake her various money makers, check out the compilation video clip below and assorted vidcaps (and other surprises) we found whilst trawling around today after the jump.

(Bonus: We're pretty sure this photo we found on UsenetBinaries.com isn't a scene from the movie, but we couldn't resist including it anyway—after all, it's not every day you get to see Natalie anal fisting "Sex and the City"'s Kim Cattrall, right?)