Appliance monologues

Does your washer talk? Or is it passive aggressive and simply “eat up some pieces of clothing” you may or may not notice.

Hmm, have you ever wondered what happened to your baby’s left mitten or that favorite striped red and black socks you love, or perhaps it was your neck tie you got for your birthday.

Coincidentally I always reckoned if our home appliances were talking amongst themselves their conversations may sound something like this………………..

Washer : I’m so stuffed? but heck I can’t talk so all I am going to do is shake, shake , shake until some of your excesses disappear into oblivion; sounds like a great idea mate? The joke is I have an “agitator” so what do you expect?

Dishwasher : Before you scream spic and span, Did you ever noticed that spic and span comes after scraps and scrap in the dictionary. Do your part – Scrap first!

Dryer : I know how to blow hot and cold air, just like the Mr. does when his Mrs is away or vice versa

Fridge : I keep things cool around here, there’s no mistaken who the tall , good looking one is in the kitchen. Now that’s a universal truth for we Giraffes. Please don’t mention the compact fridge you had in your room at the holiday inn…. he’s the adopted one in the family that’s why he looks different.

ok…… i’ll have to stop here for now, but stay tuned for upcoming monologues from Microwave and Stove, or better still leave a comment or send me a tweet of your ideas of what appliance monologues in your home sound like.