A stab in my heart.

I really feel like stabbing myself when I see my mummy cried so hard when she explain about my illness to my grandpa because he was concern on why I keep going to the doctor. I have visited 3 or 4 doctors? And this doctor really give me better hope compared to the previous one because I see results. I see smiles on my parents face after the last visit and I hope good results are coming one after another. You wouldn’t know how it feels whenever the doctor look at my face, the face of my parents are always full of worried, scared, nervous. I have no idea why I’m the one who have this illness and why must I make my parents be so worried about me. I tried to be brave and strong but I’m really pretty scared about the end result. I don’t want to hide my face forever. I see the results of the other patients and I really wish I could be like them. I want to look pretty too. I wish For miracles to happen. Sometimes I wish my parents could just abandon me and leave me alone so that my family wouldn’t be so worried about me.