Parents today, heed lessons of past

Published: Sunday, September 8, 2013 at 07:28 PM.

I find myself less and less tolerant these days of young moms and dads who haul their little darlings into retail establishments and restaurants and ignore them when they wax nuclear.

Call me old-fashioned, but my dad would have tolerated that behavior for about a third of a second before requesting I reexamine my trajectory in life. I knew my place in life early and my parents assured me that it was not at the top of the food chain. I understood I was a kid and there were three cast-in-stone rules to being a kid under their roof: Never interrupt adults when they’re talking; always address your elders with respect; and, the teacher was always right. Period.

It may sound like I had a harsh childhood, but I didn’t. I think my experience was pretty much in keeping with the times. Kids were expected to work hard at school or pay the price down the road. My mom and dad never pushed for me to do my homework and were never required to sign a sheet showing that I had done it. They assumed — and quite rightly — that the homework I brought home was my responsibility, not theirs — and if I didn’t do it, I would suffer the consequences. Those consequences meant that I might not get into college or be allowed into extracurricular activities in which I wanted to participate; but no matter what, they considered my academic life to be my own, for better or for worse.

My behavior was another thing entirely. They took that personally and made it a point to keep me on a short leash. Oddly, although I was expected to do certain things, like regular household chores, not talking back to grown-ups and following through on promises, they allowed me a great deal of personal freedom.

Back in the day, my sister and I would jump on our bikes in the morning and take off for parts unknown. We wouldn’t come home until dinnertime, most days, preferring to play outside and explore. Even in high school, they rarely kept up with what I was doing. Of course, we had the advantage of living in a foreign country, on a military installation, and our activity range was limited.

While I admit that today’s younger parents have a lot to contend with that mine didn’t — like all the baggage of the digital age, an appalling celebrity culture and disgusting individuals such as Miley Cyrus passing off what they do as “art” — none of that gives them leave to neglect the actual act of parenting their children. And while I may not have been the most stellar parent out there, my kids knew they would be jerked outside to the car for a prayer meeting if they misbehaved in public.

It’s a lesson I think modern parents need to learn before it’s too late. It if isn’t already.

I find myself less and less tolerant these days of young moms and dads who haul their little darlings into retail establishments and restaurants and ignore them when they wax nuclear.

Call me old-fashioned, but my dad would have tolerated that behavior for about a third of a second before requesting I reexamine my trajectory in life. I knew my place in life early and my parents assured me that it was not at the top of the food chain. I understood I was a kid and there were three cast-in-stone rules to being a kid under their roof: Never interrupt adults when they’re talking; always address your elders with respect; and, the teacher was always right. Period.

It may sound like I had a harsh childhood, but I didn’t. I think my experience was pretty much in keeping with the times. Kids were expected to work hard at school or pay the price down the road. My mom and dad never pushed for me to do my homework and were never required to sign a sheet showing that I had done it. They assumed — and quite rightly — that the homework I brought home was my responsibility, not theirs — and if I didn’t do it, I would suffer the consequences. Those consequences meant that I might not get into college or be allowed into extracurricular activities in which I wanted to participate; but no matter what, they considered my academic life to be my own, for better or for worse.

My behavior was another thing entirely. They took that personally and made it a point to keep me on a short leash. Oddly, although I was expected to do certain things, like regular household chores, not talking back to grown-ups and following through on promises, they allowed me a great deal of personal freedom.

Back in the day, my sister and I would jump on our bikes in the morning and take off for parts unknown. We wouldn’t come home until dinnertime, most days, preferring to play outside and explore. Even in high school, they rarely kept up with what I was doing. Of course, we had the advantage of living in a foreign country, on a military installation, and our activity range was limited.

While I admit that today’s younger parents have a lot to contend with that mine didn’t — like all the baggage of the digital age, an appalling celebrity culture and disgusting individuals such as Miley Cyrus passing off what they do as “art” — none of that gives them leave to neglect the actual act of parenting their children. And while I may not have been the most stellar parent out there, my kids knew they would be jerked outside to the car for a prayer meeting if they misbehaved in public.

It’s a lesson I think modern parents need to learn before it’s too late. It if isn’t already.