blackmail

The fact we’re even writing about Sylvester Stallone‘s personal life lets you know this story is going to be jacked. Our skin just crawled right out of our cubicle after learning that the Bullet to the Head actor allegedly paid his half-sister Toni-Ann Filiti millions of dollars in blackmail to hush up her accusations of “claims for personal injury, including physical injury” allegedly perpetrated by Stallone. According to the New York Post, in 1987 the Expendables II star paid Filiti $2 million dollars, with an agreement to maintain a $50,000 annual trust and a $16,666.66 per month stipend in the future. Is anyone else even more weirded out that the Number of the Beast happens to be in the stipend amount? Just us? Why would anyone ever pay such a bizarre amount, even in blackmail money?

Now, we know what you’re thinking: don’t you need some kind of evidence to blackmail someone? If someone called us demanding money in exchange for silence about abusing our half-sister, we would point out we don’t have any half-siblings and hang up. According to Stallone’s mom, however, the story is kind of par for the course for the now deceased Filiti. “This was nothing more than a shakedown,” Jaqueline Stallone told the Post, claiming Filiti was a drug addict attempting to finagle money out of her rich relative. “Toni-Ann was on 65 Oxycontin pills a day, and she threatened Sylvester. A drug addict will do anything. When Sylvester became famous, she didn’t have to hook. He was trying to help her. He caved in,” she alleges. A drug addict? Oh yes, there it is: the only thing as sad as if her allegations against Sylvester Stallone turned out to be true.

Justice for Uncle Jesse! Actor John Stamos was recently involved in a very nasty extortion scheme. A couple, Allison Coss andÃ‚Â Scott Sippola, were blackmailing the actor, saying he had a fling with Coss when she was 17, and that they had photographs of him with underage strippers and cocaine. They were trying to finagle $680,000 out of him. Stamos got the FBI involved and they caught the duo red-handed after staging a phony money drop. Stamos maintained that it was all a lie and he hadn’t done anything that was alleged against him. Coss and Sippola were trying to get to him through emails sent under pseudonyms (they got busted), and the Feds who searched their home found no photographs.