Eric: Hey [insert cute girl’s name], I saw on [insert name of social network] you were at the hockey game! That’s so cool, I didn’t know you liked hockey. How was it?

Cute Girl: (Blocks Eric on all social media, never talks to him again, and spreads the word to all her cute girl friends that he’s a total creeper)

Eric: (Face palm)

Example 2: The Late Night Internet Like

Eric: (Had a really long and eventful day, and is finally laying in bed getting ready to drift off into dream world. So of course I pull out my phone)

Eric: (Swiping through various news feeds on social networks such as Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc.)

Eric: (Not thinking anything of it likes, thumbs up, and comments on various posts which seem awesome)

Eric: (Falls asleep)

–Next Day–

Cute Girl: (Checks phone to find a notification signaling Eric liked, thumbed up, or commented on one of their posts/photos at 11:54 pm)

Cute Girl: (Blocks Eric on all social media, never talks to him again, and spreads the word to all her cute girl friends that he’s a total creeper)

Eric: (Face palm)

Example 3: The Dating App Investigator

Eric: (Upset at his singleness, downloads various dating apps including Tinder, Hinge, and The League)

Eric: (After much swiping starts to match with some cute girls)

Eric: (Sees name and mutual friends of various matches and uses internet skills to locate their social media profiles)

Eric: (Via dating app) Hey [insert cute girl’s name]!

Cute Girl: Hi!! [insert 15 emojis]

Eric: I see we both know [insert mutual friend] what a great person!

Cute Girl: Yeah! [insert 35 emojis]

Eric: How was your day?

Cute Girl: Great! [insert 130 emojis]

Eric: (Attempting to get a real conversation going tries to pull up some similar interests from his social media findings) I saw you like to cook, me too! What’s your favorite dish?

Cute Girl: …how did you know I like to cook!?

Eric: Oh, well I saw on your Facebook.

Cute Girl: EEEEEEEW! [inserts 1,534 negative emojis]

Cute Girl: (Blocks Eric on all social media, never talks to him again, and spreads the word to all her cute girl friends that he’s a total creeper)

Eric: (Face palm)

Example 4: The All Platform Connection Request

Eric: (Out on a Friday night at an awesome spot starts up a conversation with a cute girl. As things get to a close…)

Eric: So it’s been great chatting with you, let me get your number and we can keep this going.

Cute Girl: Sure! It’s 867-5309.

Eric: Awesome, I just texted you. See you soon.

–Later That Night–

Eric: (Feeling triumphant, gets online to look up the girl he met. Finds her on Facebook, LinkedIn, and Twitter. So I obviously friend request her on all of those. Then, her Facebook lists her Snapchat, her Twitter lists her Instagram, and her LinkedIn lists her Tumbler blog, even though that’s not the most professional. Still, feeling like it makes sense to connect I friend request her on all mediums)

–Later That Week–

Eric: (Via text message to cute girl) Hey! How about that date?

Cute Girl: (Radio silence because she already had blocked Eric on all social media, never talks to him again, and spreads the word to all her cute girl friends that he’s a total creeper)

Eric: (Notices he’s blocked er’ywhere)

Eric: (Face palm)

I Can’t Be The Only One…Can I?

Maybe everyone else out there is just lightyears ahead of me in social skills, but I have a hard time believing I’m the only one who makes these blunders.

Am I just THAT naive?

And, I’m not saying this is only a guy-girl thing. I know plenty of girls who’ve done the same to guys. I’m just speaking from the only perspective I know, my own.