I know that when you saw this picture today you said, “oh UC & Moon have got to Break that Down Vanity Fair style.” Duh. Of course we did. And welcome Kristin, our fab forum mod & viagra spammer killer to today’s Breaking it down:

Moon: OH. MY. GOD
UC: what!? is this your first time seeing this picture?
Moon: this pic!! no AGAIN. it’s my second time. It’s like almost a little much
Kristin: it was my first time.
Moon: VIRGIN- Relax! Breathe! Do what feels right, Kristin

Kristin: well he looks pissed
UC: Well, he has a hard on
Kristin: and she looks half dead
UC: and he can’t do ANYTHING about it. And in her defense…. she is half dead…
Kristin: and he totally has blue balls.
Moon: Omg- I’m just staring
Kristin: he’s like. “damnit Bella, I wanted to have to rip your shirt off and administer CPR!”
Moon: like how’d they make a near drowning SEXY?

UC: I e-mailed The Quad earlier today and said this, “Can we speculate what’s going on during this image? cuz I don’t believe the book described a scene quite this sexy when Jake saves Bells, so what do we think? Took a lil’ shower together? Jacob is too tall to scrub his feet so Bella helped him out?’ Cuz it def seems a little more ‘sexytime in the shower’ than ‘i just saved your life from a vampire standing over you while you were drowning in the cold water’
UC: EastFriend responded “He had his 1st wet dream about her, forcing him to take a cold shower. Bella stepped in to wash his back.
Or…
They were getting their Gene Kelly on. Just singin’ & dancin’ in the rain. Then Bella slipped & fell, of course, so Jake had to rescue her. It was a poignant moment, hence the serious expressions on their faces.
See? I can be dirty & clean! It’s a gift. Seeing both the sexy & pure sides of the same situation. ”

Kristin: Bella looks kind of “whaa just happened”- very damsel in distress. Makes me want to punch her. just a little.
Moon: DO THAT NOW. DO HIM. Edward left your ass. DO IT
Moon: dude bella & Edward are on WAY more than “a break”
Kristin: she can blame it on the “near death experience” !
Moon: he has to forgive you
Kristin: I always have sex after I almost die.
Moon: oh ‘oops he saved me and his tongue ended up in my mouth. ‘ OOPS. All i can imagine is a drops of water coming off his hair and hitting her
UC: her ears look big
Moon: such a hot visual
UC: so do his muscles
Moon: his nose looks big- look at his MOOBS