Wow. Even I can't believe it, really... But we're going! Because plane tickets have been purchased and Jenny Jerkface would skin me alive if I tried to back out now (it's possible that she put the tix on her credit card). If I ditched now, I would have to enter the witness protection program and even then it wouldn't really be safe for me to tread this earth, her wrath would be so great. I have no clue how this progressed in such a short time from a drinky conversation at my place where JJ grabbed my shoulders, fixed me with an extra-intense stare, and uttered the words "We have to go to Forks." And I was all "Yeah yeah sure whatever you say sweetie...now move it - you're blocking the vodka..." But here I am two weeks later and suddenly I owe JJ $420 and hot damn we're going to Forks!

Soooo... Now what????

Let's start with the basic details: the Twitarded train wreck will be pulling into scenic Forks, Washington on Thursday, September 30th. Apparently, JJ's idea of "the last weekend in September" is really "the first weekend in October" - sorry if that causes problems for anyone but since October means I can pull the "it's my birthday" card with Mr. Snarky, I'm gonna go with it. He's been a good sport about the trip (once I actually blurted out the fact that I was going) but he's not going to get any happier about me jetting off without him as the date draws near. Regardless, we'll be there until either Sunday October 3rd or Chief Swan drives us to the town limits - whichever comes first. For accommodations, we'll be passing out sleeping in style at the lovely BatesForks Motel. While they don't have any special Twilight-themed rooms (and when JJ was still trying to close this deal with me, I told her that I had to stay in one of those Twilight-themed rooms if we went to Forks), when I found out that there's a $50-ish premium over a comparable room without a red & black decor and a ten-buck movie poster, my interest faded fast. I'll trick out the room myself, thanks. How much space in my luggage can some posters and a roll of double-sided-tape take up?

The people at the Forks Motel were super-friendly on the phone, plus we figure it's a better place to be if we inadvertently make a little bit of a ruckus. We can sort of set up a Twitarded quarantine area...or something like that. Anyway, the place is well-reviewed and the pics I've seen seem decent, if not a little short on Edward for my taste. I'm a little confused because when I called tonight to book our room the person who answered the phone seemed a little befuddled by the fact that I wanted to book a room in late September and asked that I call back tomorrow to talk to the manager (oh noes - maybe someone warned them that we were coming?!), but we'll hash out all these details in good time.

So moving on to the next burning question: what are we going to do while we are there??? We have a few idears in the works... There will be alcohol involved. It will be awesome. Some people may get into trouble, but probably not. Fanpire in TN's mom suggest that some people may end up in the pokey, and that's probably not too far-fetched. In fact, when JJ told Mommy (not a)Jerkface about our impending adventure, there was a moment of silence before MnaJ announced "You are going to get arrested out there." At the very least, we might want to open up a PayPal account to start accepting donations for the the bail fund; if we really wanted plan ahead, we would just find out the going rate for "Drunk & Disorderly" and/or "Public Intoxication" and pay the fines ahead of time, thereby saving everyone involved time and trouble. Bail fund aside, if anyone ends up getting a mug-shot taken while wearing Twitarded gear, the trip will have been a total win in my book.

So whatdo we want to do while we're in Forks??? We are going to have a great time no matter what; this trip is what we make of it and I've had enough fun with everyone I've met through the blog over the last year that I know - without a doubt - that it will be epic. I can't tell all of you how psyched we are about getting together with everyone! Everything else is just gravy... We'd like to start making plans asap, as soon as we figure out the specifics. We have some ideas that we want to run by everyone, and we want your input [that's what she said] - so, in no particular order, here are a few things that might end up on the list:

Bonfire on First Beach

Trip to Port Angeles

Forks Twilight Tour

Dinner at Bella Italia

Get matching Edward Cullen tattoos

Bowling...somewhere

"Prom night"-theme dance party

Twilight Bingo at a bar/Twilight Lounge

karaoke [I have no idea if this is do-able] [JJ's note - what STY really means is "I don't really want to do this."]

Twilight movie screening

Hiking in the Hoh Forest (you know, where all the hos go hiking)

Tell us what you think in the comments - please! Gah! We are in way over our heads but are looking forward to this more than you can possibly imagine. Or maybe you CAN imagine how we feel, because hopefully you feel the same way???

FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRKKKKKKKKSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Update: We made our reservation at the Forks Motel - check in on 9/30 (Thurs), check out on 10/3 (Sunday). The motel consists of multiple buildings and we may not ALL be right next to each other since we probably won't all get the same type of room. That said, I did tell them to expect other reservations for this same time window (and they already have some online requests - wooo!!) and told them the group name (yes I said "Twitarded" to the nice man at the Forks Motel - he wasn't phased). If you want to be grouped together/have your room near other Twitards, don't forget to mention Twitarded! Sorry, there is no group-rate discount or anything like that available - we tried!

102 comments:

I'm all about Twilight Bingo at a bar/Twilight Lounge. And invite those Hillywood folks and see if their Jacob will set up a kissing booth - I'll happily stand in that line and spit in his mouth as often as possible. Hello!!!

damn and double damn. i really really really want to go. but it comes down to paying our mortage or hanging with twitarded?? i actually considered homelessness for a moment. but alas i shall be a resposible adult. i will be over here in the corner, sobbing. however i do get to meet pfach and kellan in april at the twilight convention sooooo maybe it will be fine.

I am so jealous to everyone that is going. I am trying to convince my friend from Florida to go with me, but we're both strapped for cash! I looked up flights and I am trying to convince her 240 is NOT that bad! I live in Buffalo and she is in Florida...so if anyone is coming from Buffalo let me know! I'll travel with you! If not you ladies have fun, and I'll be reading the posts and dying of jealousy :(

note: I probably should have mentioned in the post that we would LOVE to know how many people are actually going to make this trip! It will make it much easier to plan... So if you are seriously REALLY joining the mayhem in sept/oct, let us know! we realize that this is a lot of $ to fork out [ha!] but want to meet all of you in person!

I'm 99.5% sure it's not happening for me either. (gotta hold out some kind of hope w/ that .5%!) However, I was humoring/torturing myself and checked airfare - and then realized, how the fuck do you even get there? Fly to Seattle and then drive to Forks? *sigh* it all starts adding up too fast! I'll have to try to watch you guys have fun planning and going - and try to not be a raging jealous beotch.

I know you don't know me too well, I read your blog all the time but am Blogger-Comment-tarded, so don't always say my thing. I do live in Seattle, and if there is any kind of alcoholic drink consumption happening around here, I would love to come meet up and act like an idiot around you....Hell, I may even make the drive out to play bingo, cause, um, that sounds rad. In any case, I will be following your plans to come out, and may crash the party for a bit. I'll bring Vitamin R, I'm a good guest like that...

Whoo Hoo! I've put in my reservation request with the Motel for those dates. I'm up for anything exept the karaoke... Trust me you reallly don't want to hear me sing! I think we should all bring our bella birthday dresses and do a group photo in them! Narf!

Hell yeah we are going! Stoney and I were planning a pilgrimage to "Mecca" in the near future regardless, so it's just an amazingly perfect stroke of fate that y'all want to go too!

I was dying of laughter at the mathing Edward Cullen tatts! I love bowling! karaoke is fun (anyone who heard our "12 things" post knows I'm not the greatest of singers....that's never stopped me though!) We have to have a bonfire at first beach! Prom night dance party....Oh my....that sounds glorious. Fair warning, if there is music and alcohol involved Stoney and I will always turn it into a dance party!!!

Dude, this makes me really want to fly down from Edmonton and join in the festivities. As for what you should do- do a screening of "Twilight" and "New Moon" (because the DVD will be out by then) and then everyone go to see "Eclipse" together. Do you know what amazing, gong show amazingness that would be? I don't even know you girls and I want to come.

OK, so I know time will be of the essence and I hope you gals like great coffee...Forks has plenty.

PLEASE do go to Ruby Beach - you will not be disappointed I promise(just south on 101 from the Hoh and Rainforest cafe has FABOO gifts on the way in) and DO hit up the first two beaches before heading to First Beach to watch surfers near the lodge in La Push.

@Mrs P - we're flying out of Newark (we can walk to NJ Transit AirTrain from where we live and don't have to drive or park so...). We're actually arriving in Seattle on Wednesday and will stay there overnight and drive a rental car to Forks on Thursday. Wooo!!

Fuck I have to book my room now! Maybe in the morning. Tell them you are coming with the Twitarded group. There is, unfortunately, no group rate because it is high season but they will put us all next to each other or try to.

Plan on renting a car if you are coming--you will be sooooo happy that you did. Everything is really spaced out here and especially on the Peninsula. It will give you freedom to go off and do other stuff. The buses available in Forks only hold 19 people at a time.

You all can start using the Discussion Board on the Twitarded FB page to organize sharing of rooms/car rentals/flying together etc.

I am so freaking excited!!!!

Oh and STY--there is karaoke at the Twilight Lounge....I will sing to you I promise...but I will not promise that it will be pretty.

I'm ready to make the trip, but am having panicky thoughts about what flight to book, transportation, hotel reservations, roommates, not a Facebooker yet, etc.... Please somebody talk me down & tell me what to do before I start hyperventilating.

@Twilove @CC---don't panic babes! Stay cool! We'll book flights, we'll get rooms...it will all work out. Mrs. P wouldn't dare leave you hos stranded at the airport. I plan on renting the sickest van on the lot...maybe they have one with an airbrushed mural on the side...

Oh my gawd... I wanna go! When do you guys need a concrete headcount as to who's going? My BFFs and I were joking that we so need to do gUrLz only getaway, and a trip to Forks with Twitarded would be PERFECT! And heyoll yesh, we must do teh karaoke... it's so on!

I need to print this off and have a better look, but if I can take the dates off, and flights are not totally out of the budget, I am soooo there!

Was thinking, since everyone is coming from different places, and needing to get to Forks, maybe we could all meet in Seattle and hire a bus to take us there - and I am sure there would be someone in Forks tourism that would be able to point us in the direction of someone who would be able to be Tour guide - we can take him/her along on the 'party bus'.... Does anyone know how much it costs for bus hire?? At least that way everyone would have transportation for weekend, if we want to Port Angeles/La Push etc...

maybe all us Aussies could fly out together from Brisbane or something.Im cumming( thats what i said) hopefully with a friend or new friends. would also like to remind you of the possibility that they will be filming Breaking Dawn around the same time close by and am totally gunna ask to use his toilet.lol.

Oh my! Maybe in addition to the 'seattle bus' someone can organize an 'Aussie plane'...? Pretty please? Mind taking me on your private jet? I would so step out of my twicloset for the pilgrimage/ twitardday... sigh.Oh well, I shall get minor joy out of reading all bout it whilst pretending to work when checking the blog. -.-biatsches.

Forks Twilight TourParents are mortified when group of unruly 30 somethings teach their children on the Twilight Tour what a Whore Flap is...Fuckin right.

Dinner at Bella ItaliaBella Italia ran out of Mushroom Raviloli last night when a herd of Twilight Fans ordered 40 plates...hehe...I hate Mushrooms but you know I'm gonna do it.

Get matching Edward Cullen tattoosUm...you know I would actually get a tattoo right? I'm so in.

Bowling...somewhereForks Bowling Alley has most profitable night in history when Twilight Fans wipe them out of Alcohol supply...just hand me the stinky sweaty shoes already...I'm in.

"Prom night"-theme dance partyYes Yes fucking hell to the yeah.

Twilight Bingo at a bar/Twilight LoungeFight breaks out at Twilight Lounge when unruly Twilight fans argue over who had Bingo first. Alcohol may have been to blame...you are breakin' my balls and makin' me feel old here, but I'm there.

karaoke [I have no idea if this is do-able] [JJ's note - what STY really means is "I don't really want to do this."]Large group of Twilight fans kicked out of Karaoke bar for adding innapropriate words to songs...you people have heard me sing...you really want me to do this in public? Ok.

Twilight movie screening.Oh god yes. Can we come dressed up and act out parts like Rocky Horror Picture Show?

Hiking in the Hoh Forest (you know, where all the hos go hiking)I'm a Hoh for shizzle.

I just sent my reservation request to the Forks Motel. I am seriously hyperventalating!!!!Plane tickets from Indiana to Washington next on the agenda for the day! +2 ladies! Holy shit! I can't believe this is happening!

@Cullenary Curser - you shouldn't miss anything if you fly in on Thurs - that's when we'll be hitting Forks proper! And great idea with the "do your best bella" contest - lmfao!

@VitaminR - I am going to make Twitarded resi this morning - the guy seems a little confused on the phone last night, so, I'll call back in a few hours. Oh and karaoke isn't supposed to sound perfect! : )

@Stoney - lmfao! aaand all that sounds pretty much 100% spot-on as par as how things are going to go - lol!

and just fyi - we are already working (well, mostly Vitamin R70 is) with the wonderful proprietor of Dazzled By Twilight (stores and tours and Twi Lounge) and she is OUR PEOPLE!! If we go on an organized tour, it will be Twitards only on the bus and we can let our freak-flags fly HIGH - woo!

If we do karaoke, it HAS to be songs from the soundtracks (we should have three to choose from by then, right???

I so want to go to FOOOORRRKKKKSS!!!! I hate anything wet and cold just like Bella but I wanna do this thang! Already got the ok from the hubster but I need a drag along parter from Florida...anyone in/near Central FL that wants to go with me? There's no way I will go by myself 'cuz I'm a coward like that but trust me, I'm a fun drunk!

Crap, I have already started looking at flight prices and things are looking good so far...more than likely two representatives from Texas so far ; ) And I'll do anything to avoid the shitty lunch boxes for a few days...

I am flying solo ( if all goes to plan...), so if the 'Party twi bus' from seattle doesn't happen, any chance of getting a lift on one of the hire cars/vans from there??? Willing to split all costs etc... But hhmmm, might be getting a little ahead of myself at this stage, lets just blame the excitment!

I AM THERE! I just reread your post looking for exact dates and times so that I can go book my flight (and dig out the extra-slutty, rarely-used lingerie from the bottom of the drawer for when I drop this bomb on Mr. XKR tonight) :)

Seriously, I am freaking out already. I need DETAILS so that I can book my flight, please post ASAP!

@Stoney - "giggity" - lol - i am not going to survive the build-up to this trip!

@My After Car Is an XKR - At this point the plan is for us to drive from Seattle to Forks on Thursday 9/30 - we'll check in to the Forks Motel and take it from there. I'm sure we'll have a better paln once we get sloser to the date as far as what we'll do from there (and will likely use Twitter to keep us all in touch with each other while we are there...

Unfortunately, I will be returning to mexico after 3 weeks in Canada, so I must decline . Though being thrown into jail with a bunch of drunk and disorderly women sounds sooooooooo much fun, I can just imagine you emptying your pockets and one of you will have the sparkle peen and mini edward...I would love to see that cops face.

Just talked to the guy at the Forks Motel and made our resi - unfortunately it looks like there are multiple buildings spread out over six acres (!!!) and we might not all be right next to each other, depending on what kind of rooms we all reserve. But, we won't be THAT far so I guess it's ok...

Anyway, be sure to mention that you are part of Twitarded group so that you will be near other Twitards in whatever building you stay in!

I'm in!!! My birthday is Sept 29, so this is the perfect present for me! I've already started my hypnotherapy so I'll be able to fly by then without fear!

As for things to do, those ideas all sound AWESOME. JJ and STY, I'm sure your Twitards will follow you anywhere (sounds ominous!), so just let us know what we're doing and we'll do it!

And I would be willing to start a database type thing of people who are coming. The website I created before could be helpful... It could also include the details that you guys already have planned, such as specific dates and flight and hotel info. Let me know what you need me to do!!

I live in Toronto, and would likely be flying to Victoria. I have no one (NO ONE) here that shares my level of, uh, interest, in Twilight. It hit me hard and fast and I can't stop.I wear big fucking dirty boots, I curse a lot, I drink a lot, I'm tenderly yet self-destructively indulging an early mid-life crisis, and I'm always up for a caper.

Would love to come party with all of you... I'll be over on the FB Twitarded discussion board.

I am going to make my reservations right now! I'm happy to carpool fellow Twitards from the SeaTac airport to Forks since I live in Seattle. I have a sedan so I could only bring 3 or 4 people along. Email me at kitty.elvis80@gmail.com if you're interested. I'll post this at the FB discussion, too.

Oooohhh the tempting factor keeps growing....as for the social activities....I want to be a Ho hiking in the Hoh (hmmmmm....sounds like it could be a fanfic). Ok, setting up airfare alert from LA to - well where the hell do you fly into up there? Sea-Tac? And a rental car (GPS to be sure)......a shiny silver Volvo perhaps? There I go convincing myself......

Ok seriously......wv is batsitits.....what you get when you are considering going to Forks with a bunch of Twitards!

I am SO excited for you guys. I refuse to be jealous...refuse refuse refuse.

I just can't leave the hubby alone with the twins for that long yet...and I'll be damned if I am gonna bring all with...

If you go hiking in the forest you have to bring a boombox and play the twilight soundtrack...it just wouldn't be the same without the music...and you may attract other random twitards as well...win win.

@Stoney...omg..just when I had almost forgotten about the Rocky Horror Picture Show...I still have my old Frankenfurter costume case collecting dust out in the garage..20 years later and I am still holding on to that blasted thing for some reason! LOL!

My sister and I are trying to make it out. We are slated to be in SETAC earlier in August but in the process of changing things-90% sure it's a go. We rented a car in Port Angeles last time right across from the Victoria Ferry...if you have any interest in sharing the ride from there will post info on the discussion board in FB.

Is anyone planning to stay outside of Forks? Stayed in the Rainforest once- which is about ten minutes from town.

Ok so I just got off the phone with my fellow twi partner in crime with the news off the trip and she says "I dont want to go to forks".......Huh? How could she betray me? anyone from Michigan want a travel buddy....

@Eden (and any other Canadians in Southern Ontario)...I suggest flying out of Buffalo instead of Toronto or Hamilton. Buffalo is really cheap and a great airport. I just did a quick expedia search today and flying from Buffalo to Seattle is about $240 (1 stop). Flying from Toronto or Hamilton to Victoria or Seattle runs about $900-$1100. Crazy.

I just narrowly excaped a major Twitarded/Real World collision - whew! I registered for a Facebook account to follow the FOOORRRRKKKSS planning, and imagine my surprise and shock when I suddenly had a bunch of friend requests from friends, co-workers, church people, and a bunch of others who I barely know (WTF?). Then, my 18 year old daughter texted me and said "oh, no Mom, you didn't!!!" So, um... I guess I have to put a little effort into maintaining my secret identity. Any suggestions?

Well I just spent about fifteen minutes saying all manner of inappropriate things to Mr. XKR, followed by The Ask. Long story short - I'm in! Let's just say that I have him in a good mood - have been making "deposits" in the "love bank" (winkwink) for several weeks now in preparation :D :D :D

Who wants to design the tshirts and tatts? Srsly. I'm not creative but I know you bitches are.

@Dangrdafne Thanks, I took your advice and so far, it seems to be working. I had a couple questions for you, if you don't mind-- when you did it, was a deep hypnosis or more of a meditative state? And how many sessions did you need? If you'd rather, you can email me at trilithbaby@gmail.com instead of here. :o)

omg i can't believe that so many people are going to make it (or cause a lot of trouble trying - lol)!!!

we have time to plan. don't panic. we will all meet in Forks on the 30th (or come in Friday if that works better for you - I know that this is a stretch for a lot of people for a lot of reasons).

@twilove1 - i would recommend closing the FB you opened and start a new one using a different name or your bloggy name (if FB allows - you may have to get creative). otherwise the cat's outta the bag and the church ladies (and your kid) will know all - and nobody wants that - lol! FB scares me.

omg i can't believe that so many people are going to make it (or cause a lot of trouble trying - lol)!!!

we have time to plan. don't panic. we will all meet in Forks on the 30th (or come in Friday if that works better for you - I know that this is a stretch for a lot of people for a lot of reasons).

@twilove1 - i would recommend closing the FB you opened and start a new one using a different name or your bloggy name (if FB allows - you may have to get creative). otherwise the cat's outta the bag and the church ladies (and your kid) will know all - and nobody wants that - lol! FB scares me.

I'M COMING! And so is a friend of mine, we'll be sharing a room at The Forks Motel and probably flying out of either Boston or Hartford, CT, depending on tix prices. Haven't booked anything yet, need to break it to Mr. Monster first...but I'm def coming!

I soooooo vote for the tour bus from Seattle to Forks! This would keep everyone from renting a zillion cars. Either that or let's try to get together and carpool so we don't all have our own cars. How silly! And expensive. I'm a cheap date (seriously) and want to cut expenses wherever possible.

I too will be flying out to Seattle on Wed, staying overnite with a friend there, and making the trek to Fffoooorrrrkkkksssss on Thursday. Let's organize enough to convoy, please!

As one of the designated non-drinking drivers, I may need to have my own vehicle, or just give me the keys to yours and I'll gladly drive. My friend is also a non-drinker, so that's three of us including Danfane...

So I've been dreaming about this all night and feel slightly silly for considering the costs from Australia butttttttt what's the cost like at forks motel? Anyone else going from western Australia?I don't know if I'll follow through or not but I'm thinking about it!!

During working hours tomorrow I'll check it all out, right now I need to continue my Australia day festivities yayyyyyyyy

Ok, for reals and for trues now. How many rooms do you have booked up under the rezo? Because I TOTALLY want to drive up from Oregon to meet y'all for a day and night of debauchery, maybe crash one night, then drive back, due to school issues and whatnot. Maybe I can just crash with a fellow Twitard and help pay for the room......

Obsessed with Twilight? Think you're too old for this? You've come to the right place!

We are a bunch of over-thirty *cough*andforty*cough* chicks who never really meant to fall in love with Twilight... but somehow we did. Hard. Inexplicably, we've still got a lot to say about it. And other stuff. Join us!