…and Other Unlikely Places

Writing Killer Screenplays

“Unless you’re trapped on an airplane or enjoying movie night at the penitentiary, you have no excuse for watching Killers.”Jeanette CatsoulisNew York Times

Reading the reviews of the new Ashton Kutcher/Kathrine Heigl film Killers is a little like watching a boxing match where one boxer is delivering one punishing blow after another and you just want the defenseless boxer to drop and end the bloodbath. I’m sure Killers is not the first film on Rotten Tomatoes to get a 0% from top critics…but it’s the first I’ve ever seen.

No need to rehash the reviews except to say they all generally agree with the New York Times evaluation; “A brain-deadening collision of high concept and low standards. The Consensus: “Dull, formulaic, and chemistry-free, Killers is an action/comedy that’s largely bereft of thrills or laughs.”

Here’s the good news for screenwriters—it got made. And it got made with two name actors. I know that may not be inspirational to you at first glance, but trust me it is good news. And it’s good news for a few reasons.(Beyond the salaries that were covered in the $75 million budget.)

#1) Everyone knows how the statistics are stacked against screenwriters. There are upwards of 50,000 scripts written every year and only about 500 feature films produced. (And keep in mind that means that there are 49,500 scripts rolling over into the slush pile every year.) So the screenwriting gurus tell you that your film has to be perfect to get made. No it doesn’t. It just needs to be as good as Killers.

Sure, everyone wants to write the next Chinatown. Sure, it’s good to study Chinatown. But the gold is in Killers. That’s the poster you should have above your computer where you write. That’s the film that should give you hope for the screenplay you are currently writing. Killers is the film that should take your mind off of oil currently pumping into the Gulf of Mexico, it’s the film that keeps you up late writing your script–and makes you wake up early to continue writing.

Because Killers is the film that makes you scream, “Dammit, I can do better than that!”

#2)Killers is also an example of a screenwriter who just keeps plugging away. The original story and script was written by Bob DeRosa who comes from my old stomping grounds in Florida. I’ve never met DeRosa but he comes from Orlando and is one of the survivors of Hollywood East back in the 90s. He wrote his first short story when he was 6, made videos and wrote scripts as a student at the University of Florida. He spent ten years working with an improv group, worked on commercials and corporate projects, and as an assistant programmer for the Florida Film Festival (during TheBlair Witch Project glory days). All the while writing scripts, watching films, meeting people and learning the business.

When he was 31 he moved to L.A. and basically started over with the help of manager/producer Christopher S. Pratt (also from Orlando).

“There were some pretty lean times. There were those big gaps between the jobs, and I was floating myself on credit cards. Then I’d get the next job, but I’d be scared to pay off the credit cards because I needed the money to live for the next eight months. It was a very precarious six years.”Bob DeRosaInterview with Jim Cirile

DeRosa ended up landing some studio writing gigs based on some spec scripts and eventually had the script The Air I Breath produced (written along with director Jieho Lee). In 2006, he wrote the script Five Killers and with the help of Pratt landed a big studio deal just before the writer’s strike. Credit cards finally paid off.

DeRosa was stoked when Blake Snyder’s Save the Catcame out and made some revisions based on it. A top comic director (Robert Luketic/Legally Blonde) was attached to the script, and a top screenwriter (Ted Griffin/Oceans 11) was brought in to amp up the movie that became Killers. And yet here we are staring down the barrel of a big fat 0%.

At least, DeRosa can say (not that he has) “they took me off the picture and ruined my script.” (But that wouldn’t be the first time or last time that happens to a writer.) I will vote DeRosa’s title Five Killers is more intriguing than Killers. (And even with that 0% it still came in third this weekend at the box office pulling in almost $16 million. It doesn’t hurt that the Iowa born and raised Kutcher has over 5 million Twitter followers. But that film still has a long way to go to recoup its costs.)

All that to say that DeRosa’s long and winding road to paying off his bills and getting a studio script made should be of inspiration to you. On his blog he has a post written back in January of ’09 called How I Write a Spec Screenplaythat’s a good read. And just to keep this all in perspective, despite the reviews, DeRosa is living the dream.

#3) Lastly, maybe, just maybe, Killers will be the film that makes some Hollywood studio executive reflect on the kind of films studios are making. Just long enough for him or her to walk over to a window in their office, open it and, in the tradition of Howard Beale in Network, yell out— “I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take it anymore.”

And, just maybe, we’ll all look back as that being the day that changed the kind of movies that got made. Don’t hold your breath. But do keep writing that killer screenplay you’ve been working on.

6 Responses

[…] “Unless you’re trapped on an airplane or enjoying movie night at the penitentiary, you have no excuse for watching Killers.” Jeanette Catsoulis New York Times Reading the reviews of the new Ashton Kutcher/Kathrine Heigl film Killers is a little like watching a boxing match where one boxer is delivering one punishing blow after another and you […] Original Source… […]

I’ve been reading some pretty mean reviews lately, and I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to read your Killers blog. The fact that you did your research on me and the the project and wrote something that actually dares to look at the good and bad of it from more than one angle is amazing.

And yes, though I’ve never publicly said, “they took me off the picture and ruined my script”, I will say that there is a really interesting story here about the Hollywood development process. That’s a story for another time, and if you’re ever in L.A., I’ll buy you a beer and tell you the whole tale in person.

But there’s also a story here about hard work really paying off and for making that point in your blog, I salute you.

Thanks for taking the time to read the post and comment as well. I was wondering what that spike was in my views today, so you must of had your Burbank/Toluca Lake posse out in full force.

Glad you took the post as I intended it. A mixed blessing if you will. I try to be aware that there is a human being on the other end of what I write—and they may read the post.

Congrats to you on your journey to the big leagues. Orlando was an interesting time during the rise and fall Hollywood East. I’m sure it took a lot for you to pick up and start over in L.A.

I’m sure there are many similarities to our Orlando pasts— Century III, Universal, commercials, infomercials, a little radio drama, some comedy skits, SAK, Enzian, Bubba’s, writing script after script…of course, the big difference is I have a blog and you have your name on a $75 million dollar film with our Iowa homeboy. (That and you’re a Gator and I’m a Hurricane.)

Granted the reviews for “Killers” aren’t good, but you’re further up the food chain than 99% of the writers out there (not to mention having those credit cards paid off). So my hats off to you for your patience and persistence.

And just for reading the post I’ll go see the film this week. (I’m sure “Killers” isn’t as bad “Battlefield Earth.”) And I’m pulling for that film to be your “Jennifer’s Body” and the next one to be your “Juno,”

Be glad to take you up on that beer, next time I’m in L.A./Burbank. I think through this blog I know more writers and directors now than when I lived there.

(And made the change to Pratt’s name. From what I’ve read, may every writer have a Pratt come into their life who believes in them.)

after i watched the movie i was stunned! i could not believe it the plot was amazing! im studying electronic media and have studied about writing for the screen and wow it was great! nothing like what i had expected like the movies of these days! thank you bob for that please we need more! as you have inspired me to continue my goal to produce such movies and be the best videographer i can be!

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