I Watched ‘Game Of Thrones’ For The First Time & I Don’t Understand The Hype

I may be one of the only people in the world who — before today — HADN’T seen a single episode of ‘GoT.’ Everyone’s obsessed with the show, so I decided to finally watch the pilot and see what the hype’s all about. And now I’m all like, ‘Huh?’

I’m sorry, but I don’t think I’m a fan of Game Of Thrones. I just watched the pilot episode — yes, I know I’m 6 years late to the game — and I can honestly say I have no idea why everyone’s so obsessed with the HBO series. I’d maybe start watching again if they implemented a mysterious character who goes by “A” and sends cryptic text messages to everyone, but until then I’m bowing out. This show is not for me, and frankly, I don’t understand the hype. “Winter is coming?” Who cares. Did snow ever really hurt anyone? Anyway, see my 10 knee-jerk reactions while watching the pilot, below.

1. Okay, body parts are everywhere. This could be good … Scratch that, these conversations are boring me. What are they even saying? And why aren’t any of these men attractive? There’s too much dirt on their faces.

2. Also, why is this episode called “Winter Is Coming”? Based on how the first scene played it, it looks like it’s been winter for a while now.

3. Everyone seems to be afraid of these things called “White Walkers.” Is this The Walking Dead or…?

4. OMG! Ned Stark just tried killing a bunch of dire wolf puppies. What is wrong with him? Fortunately, this hot guy named Jon Snow saved them. But I’m still bored.

5. Hold up! The Lannisters are engaging in incest? Oh, hell naw!

6. King Robert seems like a man whore. He keeps talking about “f***ing girls,” but I don’t think many women would touch him — even with a ten-foot pole.

7. And speaking of unattractive men, the short man just got a blowjob from a random woman. Are producers trying to disguise the boringness of this show with a lot of sex scenes? It’s not working.

8. Oh f***. The shirtless guys on the horses are my cup of tea. Jason Momoa is so damn hot. Hmm… maybe this show is worth my time.

9. Forget it. I’m severely bored by these conversations again.

10. And a man just pushed a 10-year-old out of a window after the boy saw him having sex with his twin sister. I’m out.

HollywoodLifers, am I alone in feeling this way? Does anyone else not care about Game Of Thrones? Tell me below!