Monday, September 19, 2011

19/9/2011

a lengthy dream in dawn about manipulation between QRRS authority and me.^first dreamed of the authority of QRRS, my once and long time employer, attempted to shape my way by contacts. then dreamed a staff of the communist youth league of QRRS editing my novel I submitted for a composition competition. then he turned into a girl of my hometown village, trying being friend me. when i woke up, its a warm and bright morning. its monday before National Day of PRC. i gathered my recent records for the publish for promising on horizon in new light. God, now its cloudy in the afternoon, bring my girls my love and promise. bring our warm family sooner!

18/9/2011

benzrad comment in cyberspace on the day.

also hell with PRC. core sin is the fake atheism, socialism imported from old crap of Russia and Germany. sinful engineers nowadays still an ally of communist partisan, all innocent Chinese will laugh with tears on the day the wrecked sunk shabby construction drains the last dirty and dark conglomerates on China mainland, the scarred land since the fall of Ming Dynasty, a treasure of my ancestor in title Zhu.benzrad, the Son, here attest the fate of China as an Empire reset in his title for 1109 years in future.

14/9/2011

dreamed of my youngest elder sister.yesterday full of bliss. but darkness in son's mom's heart, esp. her greediness really annoyed me when I in need or financially pinched by short term short of currency these days. long time i made it i will never look back into her life or business, and indeed avoided her dirt and trouble since our divorce. after some reviews, i decided not to encounter her sinister plots. this morning God woke me up earlier, shoot a photo of the early full moon through my window in dawn light. then napped again. dreamed in my kid elder sister's house. i love her very much and she did so back. when i busy with preparing my son something, she was electrically shocked by wrecked socket on wall. Its a touchingly milk washing shiny Autumn morning, thx God.

13/9/2011

dreamed of being sieged by mob&cheating government.^ last night restless on bed. in the dawn dreamed in campus mistakenly ate a street vendor's food and hijacked into government agent for judge. a man and a woman dubiously trying to settle our conflict, but just cheating and profiting for the troubled water. after the vendors, in first look a couple but according the agency's message the man is a hooligan member charging to rent their protection, left me, and the agent attempted to make deal with me, i was sieged by mop of Chinese on way escaping. its a pale morning now. God, u see all the sins around me, the Son and his Royal of China. God, killing likely brewing but intact is the heart of loving. God, let's do it, for changes in new years and grace in new lives.

12/9/2011

sunny mid-Autumn holiday.^these days engaged myself with full load of d/l of games, and most of moments with baby son full of joy of playing these beautiful softwares and visions it carries. this morning baby son, warrenzh 朱楚甲, owner of warozhu.com and wozon.net, buzzed in when i still lately napping, urged me visit him sooner to join pc games. its a extraordinary warm Autumn day, also lunar Mid-Autumn holiday, so i can lingered with son most of the holiday which exactly means gathering for traditional Chinese. the grandma prepared lunch. son ate more than usual, after we broke gameplay for the dinner. his mom still busy with her pupils, while we made progress in pc game "garteling gears", a favorite for armored robotic combat fans like us, after many sweating failures. when his mom urged my leaving for they are going shopping outside, son refused my kissing his cheek but obviously relaxed by those games we played together all the morning. on bus and in QRRS dorm, when i facing my computer alone, sorrow debt to my girls haunting me again. i know my girls' willing my messages and our promised family. so i blogged again here after so much contented weeks and nights by my son's companion&visit, including those beautiful pc games. God, u know how i expect change in my life prepared for my girls, for my Royal of China as an Empire reset for 1109 years ahead, under glorious family name Zhu's, a resume to brilliant history since Ming Dynasty, built from scratch by Zhu Yuanzhang, my legendary ancestor. God, u know how my heart weighted by missing and soaring thirsts for my girls in praying our union in our promised lavish wedding ceremony. God, u know all these is the fate of one Chinese of one China under ur shine, never seen grace and glory. so here again, wind of cool and clear and blessing, brings my girls my word, my heart never close for their perfume, their shiny descending, my way to the throng never evades my girls' companion. my dearest, just let the Mighty angels clear barriers and pave the carpet for greater grace in our coming lives. i missing u and forging ever stronger linkage among us every moments in my suffering here as God trains. brave heart save u, my dearest!

5/9/2011

dreamed of my grand dad who is serious in dawn.^dreamed I lingered in a poor countryside latrine pit when I napped while downloading in this shinny morning. my kid brother was brought by our dad, who is serious, from his recent diarrhea and still let him half bent his waist when walking, with his baggage on back, to sent him away to fetch his national college entrance exam score from his school. my brother told me he will bring my teenage friend to accompany me, but I didn't respond but just wondering my lost item in the shits pool. dad shown his loving me in dream.

benzrad zhucops and bureaucracy, and undermined fake representations in governing or constitution bought from Red Revolution near a century ago, both prey common civilian in totalitarian nations, by monopolizing their gangsters (as an obvious characteristic of dog, on the contrary Christian prefers solitary redemption from God.), separating&dissolving normal social bandage into docile individuals, for the sake of their massive abuse of sole state power. 4:35 PM

19/8/2011

a dream in dawn in which my dad, now in Heaven, stayed with me longest.^Yesterday I tried to unlocked my 163 and qq blog blocked under censorship by China surveillance. in the process I asked one of my qq online contacts to help me verify my mending at same time. the bitchy site owner also in my family name Zhu, irritated me with his narrow acid spying mind, so we exchanged some stingy words. the sky darkened since them. after dinner I risked raining to jog out routinely. when I passed my ditched office, it turned sunny again. so I dropped in the office and found the employer dispatching a suite for its staff and I was not evaded. brought the gift I packed to visit my son, just after our Tuesdays' visit when son called me to rid him of the sinful grandma's custody while his mom occupied by her school duty. this dawn dreamed I competed soccer with QRRS pals team, with my family. then my passed dad, God in Heaven now, serving me for most time when I enjoyed delicacy while sat atop a cliff waiting for my son's visit. my dad contented&smiled with full hearts' joys all time. its now a sunny morning and I know God's promising. God, bring my girls sooner into our new marriages. let son sooner enjoy his new dell game desktop. let me treat son with his pals with buffet in new holiday ahead. God, dad, I love u. this my gratefulness in witness of Asoh Yukiko, my Queens of Royal China from Japan.