tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3825599023553182362018-12-13T05:16:36.325-05:00The Rufai RemedyRelationships can be the best and most stressful things in a person's life. The purpose of this blog is the share some of my knowledge with the world, take questions and give the best advice to my ability.
ALWAYS remember: If you want to hear advice that favors your preferences then go ask your friends or keep talking to yourself, if you want the RAW TRUTH of the matter with a dash of REALITY then you are in the RIGHT place.
-Mr. Hakeem Rufai
(M.S. - Marriage and Family Therapy).The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-87428621982720399642016-07-23T14:22:00.000-04:002016-07-23T14:22:12.321-04:00Actions should match WORDS
In this world we know the obvious...men lie, women lie and some people get deceived on hope. Therefore...you are only as good as your ACTIONS. Peoples Verbal Dreams/Hopes + WORDS can blind you: The trick is simple-> if WORDS and ACTIONS are often NOT in sync....say hello to their REAL personality (WORDS should never be more prevalent than ACTIONS..unless you are being played).
I want Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-25688494444830338452015-08-22T13:37:00.000-04:002015-08-22T13:38:18.953-04:00How To Heal 101
I'm sure there's always someone who may need to read this message right at THIS moment. The picture above is very accurate: Never forget.... An OPEN wound will never heal if you keep poking at it. When taking care of yourSELF becomes the #2 priority....you will OFTEN suffer in every other department of life. If you don't believe me.....just think back to times when you put someone else's Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-36308666146357663422015-08-22T11:30:00.000-04:002018-02-10T15:57:57.043-05:00IMPORTANT Dating Tips (Short & Sweet List)
Some people have the 'lifelong commitment' mentality followed by 'short term convenience behaviors'. Think about it....
2017 Dating Tips
1. Be OVER your Ex or any past sexual/emotional relationships. (Obvious if you want any longevity and trust)
2. If Distance is of the essence, be sure you two at least have the $$$ to Drive or Fly to see each other at least one trip a month or every The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-70283949625299840842015-03-20T13:55:00.000-04:002015-03-20T13:55:06.927-04:00Life Outside of THE BOX...ever tried it?!
There are MANY ways we can cheat ourselves.... Time to get even!
Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-58161831282693995902014-12-05T13:15:00.001-05:002014-12-05T13:20:27.103-05:00
Never Forget...if you can't feel comfortable being alone, you'll never know if you're choosing someone because they meet your standards or choosing someone because you HATE to be lonely/single.
Unfortunately...there is no shortcut on getting what you FEEL you deserve. Plenty of shortcuts on getting what you THINK is good for you though...but somehow those always end up being temporary ‪#‎Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-76010858293710247992014-10-10T13:56:00.000-04:002014-10-10T13:56:11.556-04:00Shared Post: The Simple Way To Understand An Introverted PersonHa! very funny illustration, I had to share it.
Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-85544877349702365782014-09-05T11:21:00.002-04:002014-09-05T11:21:36.066-04:00Depression no more....Take back your life! (control your happiness)The fact of the matter is.....WE can have full control our own happiness and/or sorrows. Everyday brings two new questions: Are we going to enjoy what we have in our lives or are we going to dwell on what we have in our lives? Play your cards with confidence! Don't be the person depressed that they don't have an Ace in their hand.
Is your relationship with a certain person bringing you down Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-72010769977679863272014-08-22T13:30:00.000-04:002014-08-22T13:54:01.538-04:00Ladies......Are you READY to commit but HE's NOT? READ THIS!! In a situation now where your ready for a serious relationship but your guy doesn't seem to be on the same page?Been together for a while and you wonder when will he decide to take the relationship seriously?Have you ever just wondered all of the above, mentioned it and got NO response from your guy or been given a watered down answer that basically means NO?
If so......he probably isn't readyThe Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-81524754164682046452014-08-01T16:49:00.000-04:002014-08-01T16:49:47.026-04:00#QuoteOfTheDayBad Relationships are like mouthwash: You BENEFIT if u know when to spit it out (experience)...But it's TOXIC if u start swallowing it! (stress & depression).
Hakeem Rhttps://plus.google.com/107882593173989132986noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-11732970959928942692013-03-30T13:55:00.000-04:002013-03-30T13:55:15.668-04:00Trust Issues?! Don't fool yourself to be a victim. We Don't believe you....
People often go on rants and say: "You Can't blame me for my trust issues!"
After 2,3, or even 4 times of repetitive failures I have to ask you:
Actually you might be right about that BUT we CAN blame you for rushing into relationships while you are emotionally damaged! Healing doesn't happen fast, nor is it easy. All shortcuts come with penalties.
Ask yourself "Is it worth The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-90421726065789469312012-11-17T14:02:00.002-05:002012-11-17T14:03:01.756-05:00Anonymous Question
"Why can't men just be honest and stop wasting our time?"
My Answer: Because there are always people who'll stick around even if they're constantly lied to Why Be Honest if there are no consequences?
if a person knows that getting caught has no REAL penalty + they are confident they can BS their way back in....Why be better? What exactly would motivate someone who is "doing you wrong?" You'reThe Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-39911662954667136642012-09-13T14:15:00.000-04:002012-09-13T14:16:40.720-04:00The Most Important Element Known To SUCCESSFUL Relationships...
One of the most essential element to mankind is TIME...it is irreplaceable, under appreciated and often misunderstood by many. TIME : The element that allows a person to learn, to grow and become wiser. There are plenty of people who fear being single, they can't imagine themselves functioning without a partner to lean on, no matter how dysfunctional the relationship is.
This causes the The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-50512810784283456702012-08-11T15:12:00.001-04:002012-08-11T15:12:33.168-04:00What Time Is It? Time To Wake Up!
Introducing the Wrist Watch Time Machine! Specially tailored for those who fear being alone and ALWAYS keep a “Safety Net” of Ex’s, Ex’ flings or Old loves around to avoid ever really experiencing Loneliness. Being single while wearing this watch means that you are NOT really single at all. Your body is single(for your conscious sake) but your mind and/or heart has already been given to the The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-53549701523886679802012-05-19T17:31:00.000-04:002012-05-19T17:31:18.963-04:00Friends Vs. Fictions (aka they're not really your friends)Hello, how is everyone doing today? I OFTEN see people consider the
wrong people to be their FRIENDS while classifying the people who care
about them as "Fake" or "bad" friends. Chase people who don't want you
in their life only to shun those who would love to keep you in their
lives. WE'VE ALL SEEN OR DONE IT BEFORE.Friends Vs. Fictions (aka they're not really your friends)
*Communication*
+The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-69694107523560603272012-02-04T22:18:00.000-05:002012-02-04T22:18:39.013-05:00Repeating the Same 'Mistakes' While Expecting DIFFERENT Outcomes (Definition of INSANITY)
If u look good + talk a nice game + ask a few questions over the span of a few weeks/months, people would SWEAR they are "ready" for a Relationship with you LOL.
Silly Rabbits..... *THERE IS NO REPLACEMENT for taking TIME to know a person.* Asking a million questions only accounts for about 40% of what you will need to know about the person(since you reply on them to TELL you their The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-11581217609741632642012-01-26T15:59:00.000-05:002012-01-26T15:59:47.304-05:00#MaleAdvice - To THIRST or Not To THIRST?#MaleAdvice - To THIRST or not To THIRST? AKA "Get this man some damn water!"
It appears these days that the male thirst and being overly emotional has DRASTICALLY increased, especially online.
The Example below is The MOST OBVIOUS Clue in the world that women say but thirsty men seem to overlook it then get mad for when things didn't go their way: Then the guys have the NERVE to start The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-26302351841977578622012-01-05T15:12:00.000-05:002012-01-05T15:13:21.907-05:00TOP 7 Things We Wanna See Different in 2012 for Social Networks
I created and posted an update on Google+ about The top 7 Things We Wanna See different on Social Networks in 2012. Dj Chester shared my post on his website so i figured i would share it on my blog as well, PROPS to http://www.XlUrbanMedia.com the original shared link is below(I copy and pasted the full text below for your convenience too. ENJOY and don't forget to comment, with questions, The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-16953100216707055732011-07-17T19:34:00.002-04:002011-07-17T19:36:03.636-04:00Q&A: Anonymous asked-> Why don't most men show their true feelings??
This question is sometimes comedy because I've seen it asked by women before and i happened to know the men they were involved with at the time too, so believe me when I say this:
The FEELING ALOT of the time is: I like her, I'm enjoying the sex, head, VIP treatment etc, and i wanna keep this on lockdown as long as I can <-- THE END
There are no advanced feelings there BUT some women seem to The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-23969249677713772922011-06-16T17:46:00.000-04:002011-06-16T17:46:20.807-04:00Q&A - "I think I Can Change a Person"The Question: It is said that you CANT change a person, but I honestly think you CAN, what do ya'll think?
My Reply:
The REAL question is....WHY would you want to change anyone besides your own children or maybe a friend/family member in distress who explicitly ASKS for your help? In the relationship area....that word CHANGE is like the elephant in the room. Taking the responsibility to change orThe Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-24567137944904666162011-06-12T19:22:00.000-04:002011-06-12T19:22:28.677-04:00Too many Sex Buddies......Not Enough Committed Relationships!These days, when I log online, all i see are too many sex buddies.....not enough official relationships being reported. Unfortunately you are STILL SINGLE if you are not in a COMMITTED relationship! People have become DELUSIONAL these days! Talking bout "Im Happily Taken" umm NO YOU ARE NOT! Your Vagina is just being Subleased,that's about all i see happening! Why turn down other date offers fromThe Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-16084300510848628862011-05-21T12:30:00.000-04:002011-05-21T12:30:28.154-04:00NO means YES, and THIS means THAT?.....LOST IN TRANSLATION?These days…things are JUST NOT what they seem anymore. I KNOW I can’t be the only person to notice these occurences or to hear these stories from others over the YEARS. Im scared to see how things go in another 10 years, the whole damn society will be speaking a new language and fooling others, we are getting too old to re-learn new lingo, SPEAK TRUTH and SPEAK DIRECT to keep it simple for The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-84543313295244347122011-05-21T12:23:00.000-04:002011-05-21T12:23:50.564-04:00HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF & Find your INNER MOTIVATION(follow these steps for SUCCESS or I will give you your time back for reading!)How To Love Yourself - If you REALLY want to LOVE yourself, PLEASE start doing these things listed below! Its the ONLY WAY to ensure Happiness ;-)
1. Take care of your needs LAST.
I mean, they’ll get taken care of somehow, by someone, right? Not only should you take care of your needs last, you should also keep quiet about your needs. Wouldn’t want to burden anyone else with your ‘issues’. You The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-2627572382509422752011-05-21T11:55:00.000-04:002011-05-21T11:55:10.513-04:00Making POSITIVE Changes To Your Life *Made Simple* “Work harder on YOURSELF than you do on your job/social relationships.”Making positive change in your life doesn’t have to be all or nothing for you to see positive results.
You can start slow and change your life piece by piece until you feel comfortable with who you are, what you’re doing and what you have achieved. This worksheet for positive change will help you identify the personal qualities you possess now and the ones you want to express.
Next it will help The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-82761722904443829522011-03-28T13:02:00.000-04:002011-03-28T13:02:24.259-04:00BIG DIFFERENCE: WANTING a Relationship and being READY for one: The TRANSITION *Must Read*Hey....have you ever heard someone describe their relationship to you and they use the phrase "at the beginning I made some mistakes" or "in the start of our relationship I didn't take it as seriously" ?? Then I laugh and wonder, wait.....a relationship is a relationship, why was the level of commitment "loose or questionable" at the beginning in the first place? LolThen the expert mode kicked inThe Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-382559902355318236.post-53806016064731758612011-03-28T12:51:00.000-04:002011-03-28T12:51:14.481-04:00REAL Friends Vs. "Friends" (You ultimately are as good as the company you CHOOSE to keep)The HOT topic huh?<span> What is a REAL friend and what is a fake friend? I think people OFTEN know who isnt good for their circle but they just CANT or dont want to make the necessary CUTS for one reason....or the other</span> ( emotions, comfort, denial or maybe they are more similar to the persons negative traits than that realize so its a PRIORITY to keep them around). <span>YOU WANT A GREAT The Love Specialisthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15328274562518997101noreply@blogger.com0