Wednesday, September 19, 2012

50 Shades of Not-So-Grey

The Hunger Games is a novel trilogy that’s wildly popular with
teenagers. They’re being made into movies and my local Sam’s Club had a themed
display for the books. In fact, the series is so popular that this Sam’s Club
sold enough of those books that there was empty space on this end cap and the
staff had to fill those shelves with another series. What did they suggest for
those teen readers? 50 Shades of Grey.

This
post isn’t likely to win me many friends. The 50 Shades trilogy has sold 40+ million copies, it’s pornography,
and it’s being sold to our teenage girls. That’s right. Today, we’re talking
youth, sex, and some hard truths.

What is 50 Shades of Grey? You might have heard the title and a few
flitting rumors. It was based on the wildly profitable Twilight series. It features some unconventional and explicitly
detailed sex that’s got the married-with-kids-30-something-year-old-wives whispering
and raving. It’s being dubbed “mommy-porn” and too many Christians are silent
about it.

The story centers around a female
protagonist and her love for a man that wants to control her. Control her
thoughts, control her actions, control her body, what/how much she eats, where
she goes, who she sees, what she does and more. He tracks her movements on her
cell phone. He tries to engage her in a sex contract and he does all these
things, why? Because he has issues and he “loves” her.

And our women are eating it up.

The author, E.L James, hides all
this abuse under an extremely misused umbrella of BDSM. Boiled down, BDSM is a
consensual practice of two partners in which one partner is in control of the
sexual pleasure. The hinge word is consensual.

Because at some point in this
series, the female protagonist tells her “love” interest no, and he ignores
her. That’s right. He rapes her. Let me remind you again, this series has sold
over 40 million copies.

This is the cover of the first
book. It certainly doesn’t look like something the media could dub “mommy-porn”
does it? I mentioned that the author was inspired by the Twilight series, but that’s not entirely true. 50 Shades started as an erotic fan fiction of Twilight. The protagonist was Bella Swan and her love interest was
Edward Cullen. The cover photos of the two series even look similar. Both have
a black background with one object serving as a metaphor or theme from the
book. I encourage you to take a walk through the Young Adult section of your
local book store sometime because the vast majority of those titles have the
same style covers. It’s a marketing stratedgy.

And Young Adult books are for ages
15+.

And now we arrive at my core heart
of this post. This abusive, XXX detailed novel series is being marketed to our
high school girls. Godly and Christian mothers are unknowingly buying their
daughters porn because their church stands silent.

Erotica isn’t new. But before 50 Shades, the covers were half naked
men with long hair, riding stallions and holding roses on a beach. The covers
of 50 Shades are a neck tie, a mask,
and a pair of handcuffs. Twilight was
an apple, a bloody flower, a ribbon, and two chess pieces. The Hunger Games is different incarnations
of a bird called a Mockingjay set against a solid color background. 50 Shades looks like all the other books
teens are reading right now.

And what message are these books
giving our youth? That abuse is normal. That if a man loves you, he will
control your life, what you do and who you’re friends with. That if he can’t
control his sexual need for you, that if he rapes you and sends you lavish
gifts, that’s love.

Whether your definition of love
comes from a Christian perspective or not, no one should consider this love or
something to be glorified and reveled in. This is abuse. This is not a story
about a woman that fixes a broken man. This is abuse. This is not about kinky
sex, or having a handsomely rich man love you, or finding your
happily-ever-after. This is physical, emotional, and sexual abuse. There is
nothing “grey” about it.

The silence of our churches and
Christian leaders on this series disgusts me. If this were a XXX movie with the
same plot and scenes that prominent male members were watching and sharing with
their
guy friends, our pastors would be outraged at the pulpit. But it’s in a book,
not a movie. (Yet. The 50 Shades
movie is in development.) And it’s for women. It’s a difficult subject to talk
about not least because its popularity is such an odd phenomenon.

The question can be raised that if a
married woman is reading these books and finds them erotic, is it really
harming anyone? If we assume that she’s lusting for an imaginary character but
taking her bolstered enthusiasm into her marital bed, is it that really
sinning?

Matthew 5:28 tells us, “But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with
lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Adultery and lust
are not sins exclusive to men.

Wives: Would you encourage this same
behavior from your husbands? Reverse this and turn it into a man lusting after
a female XXX film star. He’s coming to his wife, asking her to replicate things
he watched another woman do, chasing a high created by sin. Again, the picture
becomes a lot clearer. We’re dealing with something that is black-and-white Christianly
immoral, not something meandering in grey area.

What can you do? Send this post to
your friends. Send it to the women in your Bible Study, to your sisters,
to your daughters, to your granddaughters. The women most at risk to being
taken in by this series are those who are not of this world and buy these books
without knowing what’s between the covers. Send it to your pastors. To your
elders. To your youth group leaders. Help break the Christian silence.

1 comment:

I love that you are willing to confront, and step on toes in order to point to truth. You are awesome. At the time you posted this, I think a lot of Christians were simply unaware of how damaging this book is to relationships.Now, more than a year later, I think the word is finally out. STAY AWAY from 50 SHADES!Either way, I appreciate how you are always (that I've seen) ready to speak the truth in love. :)

About Me

I believe in the basic things in life, such as justice, peace, chivalry and love. I have the most loving husband and wonderful daughter.
My sleeping habits have a few people thinking I'm a vampire. (Don't worry, no glitter here) I'm beginning to warm up to zombies, though I still think they lack class.
Sometimes, I'm awkward.
I hate toucans and prologues.