You Might Have to Book a Table at McDonald’s Soon

September 24, 2015

We’ve all been there. We’re on a big night out. By 2am we’ve probably got five litres of beer spilt down the front of our tops and the bottoms of our shoes are still feeling sticky from the unwashed floor of the club. We stumble into a McDonald’s at 2am after a few too many. We want fast food, and we want it now. And then we look around and think: “Wouldn’t this just be so much more of a civilised situation if there was table service.”

OK, we’ve never thought that. And if you have, you probably need to grow up a little bit. But still – one bright spark at McDonald’s has suggested introducing table service and reservations. Because, y’know, McDonald’s just isn’t upmarket enough at the moment to compete with the likes of The Ritz.

So, posh McDonald’s, eh?

McDonald’s think this is such a good idea that they’ve already jumped to the trial phase. From this Friday, customers at their 31 Swedish outlets will be able to book a table online. And in the evenings table service will also be available. Imagine our Big Macs and milkshakes being brought over on a tray! We’ll instantly feel like we’ve climbed 20 rungs of the social ladder.

Get in my mouth.

It’s not the first attempt they’ve made either

When we heard the news of this new posh McDonald’s, we weren’t overly surprised; it seems like McDonald’s have been trying to shape up their fast-food image for some time now. Last year they tried to introduce a ‘gourmet service’ in their New South Wales, Australia, restaurants. The swines are now treated to gourmet burgers, plus wooden trays and metal baskets to hold their chips. We’re more jealous than is probably reasonable.

Even Japanese customers were treated to the luxury experience with a one-night pop-up in Tokyo. Gone were the shoddy cardboard packages, and in came proper cutlery and wine glasses.

Maybe the bosses at McDonald’s were inspired by the three lads who decided to turn their fast-food meal into a candlelit dinner? The teenagers tried to up standards by bringing in their own cutlery, candles, plates, wine glasses and tablecloth for their ‘date’. Such lads.