dance as though no one is watching

SXSW Day 3: Sunday

Now, you’ll think I’m crazy, but I was really looking forward to this first film on Sunday. Without any help from Mike, we managed to get to Paramount just before Alan Cumming’s Suffering Man’s Charity. The main reason I wanted to see this was because David Boreanaz is in it and I have heard people in lines talking about seeing him at the first screening. Unfortunately, our screening was not blessed as such. We did have Alan Cumming (star & director) and the hilarious Karen Black. Alan Cumming stars as John Vandermark, a music teacher that lives in quite the dump of an old house. He has taken in Sebastian (Boreanaz) in hopes of giving him the opportunity to become a great author. He is very obviously smitten with Sebastian, but has reached his limit after several months of Sebastian’s mooching. He struggles with making excuses for Sebastian, but finally hits his limit and cracks, taking his sanity with him. The rest of the movie is spent with Sebastian duct taped and strung with christmas lights in a chair, while wearing ladies undergarments. John goes on numerous tirades during this time. The highlight of the movie was David Boreanaz’s ass in ladies lacey boy short underwear. Granted, that is a wonderful thing, however I like my movies with a bit more substance. Michael stated it well when he told me “it would have been a good short.” 5 out of 10

The next film at the Paramount was a completely different affair. The Texas roller derby documentary Hell on Wheels. A major downside to this particular screening was the attendance of the rival Austin roller derby leagues that the film is about. To say they were obnoxious would be kind. Every time someone was introduced on the screen, one group or another would cheer incessantly making the next minute of dialogue completely inaudible. Apparently this has been in the making for five years due to the fact that so much drama involved, they just kept filming. If it weren’t for the drama of the original league split and creation of a new league, this could have been very boring. Well, not too boring cuz the women followed are definitely some characters. The director and producer were on hand and you could tell this was a long difficult journey and they were very glad it was finally coming to an end. The Q&A was interesting due to the fact that the girls were there, and people asked somewhat interesting questions. Most Q&A sessions after the films can be very boring or non-existent. 7 out of 10

Still at the Paramount, I passed my time with He Was A Quiet Man starring a very different looking Christian Slater, Elisha Cuthbert, and William H. Macy. Christian Slater is Bob Maconel, an almost postal employee of a large corporation. He keeps trying to get up the nerve but doesn’t have the chance cuz another employee gets the jump on him by shooting up the office. In the process, Vanessa (Cuthbert), is shot in the spine, paralyzing her from the neck down. In a turn, Bob becomes quite the hero by shooting the gunman with the gun he brought to do the same. Out of guilt or obligation, Bob starts to look after Vanessa, and they grow quite close. However, he has a hard time accepting her feelings for him, and gets paranoid that she wouldn’t be with him if she weren’t a quadriplegic. Over the years, Christian Slater has always just seemed like a joke of a Jack Nicholson parody to me. This was the first time in a long time when I thought he was his own actor. Granted, he had fake hair and teeth, but for some reason, his portrayal of the whack job rang true. Still, despite that, I’d have to say this movie seemed to fall terribly short of what it could have been. Some of the explanations the director gave during the Q&A were very interesting and enlightening. However, most people aren’t going to have the luxury of the director in front of them to explain it into a better movie. 4.5 out of 10

We then attempted to trek over to the Alamo Drafthouse on South Lamar to catch the documentary King Corn. However, we didn’t get in. We were about 20-25 people back from where they stopped letting people in. C’est la vie, I needed a break anyway, and it plays one more time. Home to bed then.