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Thursday, July 16, 2009

I'm the Nut

The other day, a girl I work with mentioned that she likes her boys a little girly.

“Why don’t you just date girls, then?” I asked her, very nearly following it up with the assurance that I wasn’t coming on to her. Statements like that coming from an out lesbian always seem to put straight girls on DANGER ALERT.

“Nah,” she replied. “There’s a balance to a girly guy. Plus, girls can be a little nutty.”

That’s the point I’ve been pondering ever since our conversation:

GIRLS CAN BE A LITTLE NUTTY.I write a lot of lesbian romance and erotica, and more and more I’m finding myself writing these characters who are—how else can I phrase it?—a little nutty. Clarification: both partners are not nutty. If there’s a nutty girl in my story, there’s a sensible, level-headed girl to complement her.

Yes, I draw a lot on my own life and experience when I’m writing. Does that mean my girlfriend’s a little nuts? No, no…no, she’s pretty mature and relationship-savvy.

I’m the nutty one.

So, in honour of all us nuts, here’s a list—a little sampling if you will—of various neuroses that can challenge a relationship:

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Syndrome?Check.Radical Feminist hypersensitivity?Check.“She’s bound to break up with me when she realizes what an ass-face I really am”-related anxiety?Check.Trust issues?Check.Abandonment issues?Check.Other issues as yet unidentified but nonetheless detrimental to interpersonal interactions?Check.Mood swings linked to chocolate and/or caffeine overdose and/or withdrawal?Check.Undiagnosed Tourette’s provoked by minor inconveniences?Check.Various garden-variety neuroses?Check.Psychoses?Not quite, but I’m working on it.Don’t get me wrong; I’m not claiming that all girls are nuts. I’m just saying that I am. And it’s true: sometimes I wonder why the hell anyone would ever want to put up with me.

My girlfriend shrugs off my nuttiness, claiming that “we all have our issues,” but aside from transgender concerns, she doesn’t wear hers like I do. My Sweet’s pretty level-headed. Lucky her…and lucky me. It’s a major comfort, to find that complementary someone.

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Giselle Renarde is an award-winning queer Canadian writer. Nominated Toronto’s Best Author in NOW Magazine’s 2015 Readers’ Choice Awards, her fiction has appeared in more than 100 short story anthologies, including prestigious collections like Best Lesbian Romance, Best Women’s Erotica, and the Lambda Award-winning collection Take Me There, edited by Tristan Taormino. Giselle's juicy novels include Anonymous, Cherry, Seven Kisses, and The Other Side of Ruth.