Dancing With Your Skeletons

Yesterday, I made a short presentation about mindfulness in daily life at a small church 2 hours west of Edmonton. The pastor spoke about lightening our burden and not carrying the weight of the world in our backpacks. It is important to lighten the load.

Dyan makes a similar point using the metaphors of dancing with skeletons. The Marianne Williamson provided a more Jungian approach in the quote about shadows.

There are reasons we are called and given voice in our lives. Sometimes, we do not see the reasons easily and we need to examine the weight in our backpack, dance with our skeletons, and know our shadow side. Being mindful is about knowing what to discard, what to retain, and making sense of it as we take the next step. I spent 20 years teaching and it was challenging at times, but I know those challenges were worthwhile and meant something. I was not always sure of the meaning, but I danced with the tunes being played in the shadows and my skeletons learned to dance as they came out of the closet.

About ivonprefontaine

I completed a PhD at Gonzaga University in Spokane, WA. Previously, I taught for 20 years and taught for 15 years in a wonderful hybrid school. My dissertation topic and research were how certain teachers experience becoming who teachers. In teaching and leanring, I am a boundary-crosser who understands moving ahead is a leap of faith.
Teaching is a calling and vocation to express who I am as a person. Currently, I am waiting and listening to what calls me next. I am an educator, phenomenologist, scholar, boundary-crosser, published poet, author, parent, grandparent, and spouse.

I tend to carry too much in my pack, literally and figuratively.
I have been going through my belongings and culling, when I am done, I will go through again. Clothing, books, old photos, jewelry. Some of everything is leaving.
I am also going through times in my life and choosing to let go of guilt and regret.
Getting rid of some of the physical and some of the psychological feels good!

I like the analogy you used with our skeletons and our shadow side. I think I have to learn to accept that shadow side of myself, be aware of it, so that I can better live my free side…I have been reading Thich Nhat Hahn and I love his gentle expression regarding “mindfulness.” Namaste!

Dancing with skeletons was such a hard thing for me to do, because I for so long craved the security I didn’t get as a child. That said, I now dance a merry jig with those old bags of bones, and I can say that they aren’t as scary as they at once seemed. Love your analogy.

Being mindful is all very good. But I don’t think it tells me how to go about transforming my life. It just makes me aware of why I behave or do the things I do. It does not teach me what to do to change.

Hi Ivon, this is a private message, but I couldn’t find a way to send you an e-mail. I just started taking a Coursera course called “Inspiring Leadership through Emotional Intelligence” and I thought of you. It’s only just begun, but I’m enjoying it…maybe you will too. Here’s the link: https://www.coursera.org/course/lead-ei
Willow

Ahh yes, to not carry the world in our backpacks. I just had a big lesson in that, both figuratively and literally when I walked the Camino de Santiago. We must remain mindful and that is where we do our work. Thank you for sharing.

the best thing is not to carry anything in your backpack at all. Go with the flow. But, it is easier said than done. Struggles with the content of the backpack is a never ending story for all of us and I just hope that once in a blue moon we get our aha moments that help us dance in the rain and clean out all that is not needed anymore

I love the idea of dancing with your skeletons! It’s good to realize how much we carry, sometimes I find it can disguise itself as me, but offloading the right kind of weight at the right time, is an essential. It’s always good to discuss that! 🙂