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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Just listen to a story ‘bout some folks who wedThey made up a cake with some varmints that were dead Then one day, looking for computer sexThey noticed that their cake had been labeled as a wreckCake Wreck, that isPure goldWrecky glee...

If you've got stuffed animals that you shot yourself topping your wedding cake... You might be a redneck!If Bud Lite is the official sponsor for your wedding ... You might be a redneck!If you think getting boxes of ammo is a romantic wedding gift... You might be a redneck!

Upon further examination… I am impressed that someone actually got two dead squirrels to hold hands, but I am a little worried about what mister squirrel is doing with his other hand. Is it an attempt to fondle himself? Or is he just holding in his nonexistent guts?

I try to be prepared to see anything on CW (no sips of coffee in this mouth!) but this one elicited an out-loud OMG and then hysterical laughter. The empty beer cans are are the proverbial "icing on the cake"! Like to drink much? The reference to the Bloggess and then the comments (SuBee, I'll be humming your song all day) are pure gold. Thank you for a great start to Monday.

I'm still having difficulty breathing, because I clicked on the link to The Bloggess' post first. Haven't laughed that hard since I read the first Cake Wrecks book. I'm a long-time lurker and first-time poster. Love @Sharyn and @SuBee's songs. Wonder what mel and Haiku Joy will come up with. @Gray- too funny!

We have tons of squirrels around my work. They are very friendly because lots of people feed them. I've also seen them climbing in trash cans and we ALL know how sanitary THOSE things are. Just...eeeeeewwwww! Thanks for the appetite suppressant this morning. **hurk**

@Sharyn and @Subee ~ 2 songs that should never go together. Both are stuck in my head now. Thanks ladies!

@Heloise, having lived in the hollers of eastern Kentucky, I'm guessing the meal included what they removed from the squirrels before they stuck them on that "cake." And @Gray, it appears that he's reaalllly eager to get that honeymoon started. Bet the tie doesn't even come off. That, or he drank most of that beer himself and is eager to get someplace else.

Yeah... I don't care if the squirrels are dead or alive. If they're real squirrels, I don't want them on cake. If they're just, as Jenny suggests, made of marzipan, then... sure? But if I were there, I'd want assurances before eating any of it.

Because if those are real, that is beyond cakes that look like they've been pooped on, and also beyond cakes that commemorate birth in the worst ways possible, because they're at least made entirely of edible parts, or at least theoretically clean and removable inedible parts. This is actual contamination, something which only moldy cakes generally achieve.

I can't really get past the fact that someone ordered something that came out looking like this. And while this is horrible, what on God's green earth did the person order?

"Hi, I'd like to order a wedding cake, with dead squirrel toppers. Colors? Let's go with mud poop and seaweed green swirl. Oh, and can you put some beer cans around it? Let's see. Oh, yeah, the male squirrel should be incontinent. Or perverted. Whichever you think would look best. Kthanxbye."

Squirrel, Squirrel, candle lightHavin' a weddin’ and doin' it right in the hay barnOh gosh darn!Squirrel Suzie, Squirrel SamDo the wedding dance in a Squirrel LandAs they hold hands, Sam is gladAnd they whirl and they twirl and they tangoSingin' and jinglin' a jangleFloat like the heavens aboveLooks like Squirrel Love

Nibblin' on Weddin’ cakeFlanked by BeerSam says to SuzieWould you please be my DearSuzie says, Yes, as Sam’s “love” growsNow, they’re sticky with frostingStuck in their toesMuzzle to muzzleNow anything goes as they wriggleSue starts to giggleAnd they whirled and they twirled and they tangoSingin' and jinglin' a jangleFloatin' like the heavens aboveLooks like Squirrel love

How do you make sure only you and the groom get to eat the Wedding Cake??? Put dead animals on it. Sadly I live around alot of backwoods people who drink that beer... and this that the rest was Dinner AND Dessert (blech)

I think what's getting me aside from the squirrels is they didn't just use Bud Light, but they used open, empty cans of Bud Light. It's like someone drank them and then stuck them on the corners of the cake!

This is a real cake and those are real squirrels. The groom is a taxidermist. The couple was featured on the TV show "My Big Redneck Wedding" (or whatever it was called) and live in south Georgia. You should look it up...if nothing else but to see the look on the cake makers face when she presented her idea to him.

I haven't figured out what bothers me the most about the cake: the poorly executed camouflage; the fact the squirrels look like they are balanced directly on the cake without benefit of even a piece of cardboard; or the fact that they consider bud lite an acceptable form of beverage. Or that they put squirrels on a poorly decorated cake with 4 empty cans of beer flanking the whole mess...*shakes head sadly*

On the other hand, the comments here were priceless and now my Monday is SO much better.