Some content on this page is not suitable for young eyes or faint hearts.Views expressed by Sleep Talkin' Man rarely reflect the opinions of waking Adam.Especially the desire to exterminate all vegetarians (but he does hate lentils.)

20111230

"No, you're NOT going out like that. Your feathers all ruffled and beak covered in that nasty lipstick, and that excuse for a skirt. You look like one of those street-corner dirty chickens. Go back upstairs and put something decent on. You live under my coop, you behave and you dress like a good chicken! This is hard-boiled love, you know."

A rogue hand. It's not even having an attempt to try and hide. It's still there, on my face. I know exactly who did it. This isn't the kind of thing Miss Marple's needed for, this isn't Murder She Wrote, my hand is STILL ON MY FACE. I do have an itch, funny enough, but unfortunately it's not in the place where I've smacked myself in the head, so I need answers. But it's not talking. I don't think I'll ever ever understand why my hand hates my face so much! WHY?! What have I done to you??!

20111221

"Hey! This is MY playground. These are MY swings. That's MY climbing pyramid. And that's MY springy elephant! THAT'S MY SPRINGY ELEPHANT! You crusty knob-end. Bog off! Leave this playground to the king of playtime! ... Mmmm, they're all mine.... I need a push. (whining pathetically) I can't swing without a push. PUSH ME! Where is everyone? Bastards. (muttering bitterly) This is MY playground."

20111219

"Oh shit. There's a ton of shit coming in, and you're sitting there, doing the same old shit, not giving a shit. Get off your fucking ass, and get on with the shit that's coming in, otherwise we're going to be up to our necks in this shit. Shit. You're such a shit."

Okay: pith helmet makes sense; small box, yeah I can see why; baby wipes... maybe to keep them clean and fresh for when he delivers them on the other side, no? You know, if he's underground with his pit helment, he doesn't want to get his midgets dirty. He wants to deliver nice clean midgets.

20111207

Adam said that one while I was away in the States for Thanksgiving. It came out the night that my family went out to see the new Muppet movie. It was AMAZING, and I can confirm (spoiler alert) that there was no muppet porn.

"A long long time ago, right up until the minute you were born, everybody was happier."