Monday, August 31, 2009

The movie begins in 1901 in the town of Halletsville, Texas. Some kids are killed in a schoolhouse by a psychopath. We cut to present day and a funeral. Tyler Jensen(Derek Lee Nixon) is mourning the death of his grandmother. He is remembering her as she was. His college friends are there and they meet outside and chat. So,Tyler's ex-girlfriend, April(Katie Fountain) shows up and tries to get back with him. Tyler decides to go and stay at his grandmother's house for the weekend. He remembers the house from when he was young as his cousin died there in an accident.

So, Tyler gets back with April and he asks his pals to come down to the house for the weekend too.The kids head down to the house but they are stopped on the way by the Sheriff of Halletsville, played by Gary Busey. He seems a bit odd and he warns them not to cause any trouble up at the house. They go on their way and arrive at the house. April thinks that she sees something, but there is nothing there. They find out that the house is strange. They talk about a legend about a psycho who killed kids in the 1900's. That night, one of the kids sees something and gets a scare. The next morning, Jonathan(Jesse Janzen) wants to go home as he doesn't like the house and all that is happening. Tyler agrees to drive him back but before he can, Jonathan sees something in the back of the car and he tries to drive the truck but crashes it after he swerves to avoid hitting an animal that mysteriously showed up in the road. He gets nabbed by something bad..

One by one, the others are dispatched until there are only a few left. They go to someones house and calls the Sheriff. The cops come out and take their statements. The kids find some book and it says that the killer, Adam, needs to kill people to survive and they figure out that Tyler is next on the list. So, Tyler shows the cops where the dead bodies are but the killer shows up and attacks the cops. Tyler gets caught by the killer and it prepares to kill him. April finds him and she begs the killer to stop, but he doesn't. The Sheriff shows up and he shoots the killer/devil thing. Tyler dies. The movie ends with April going home after it all. She was pregnant with Tyler's child and we move on to when the baby is born..The devil thing comes for her baby.....

This movie was not very good at all. I was not impressed with it. Gary Busey was the only person I knew but he could not save this movie. I found the ending to be silly and far-fetched and I really did not like this movie. It gets a low 3/10.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

This movie looks very interesting even if it does remind me of 30days of night..It is set in Antarctica at some station and it is about a killer who is on the loose. The cops must find him before the sun sets for six months...It stars Kate Beckinsale and Tom Skerritt. I like the look of it and I think that I will be going to see this one...Watch it and see what you think of it..Enjoy!It is out next month..

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

This movie is based on a book by Serge Brussolo. It stars Mischa Barton. It is directed by Gilles Paquet-Brenner(?)...

The movie begins with a young girl trapped in between walls and cement pouring down on her as she is buried alive. Then there are paper clippings telling us that some person buried loads of people in walls for some reason in 1993 and that the architect had done it. He is supposed to be dead along with his victims. We cut to 15 years later and Sam(Barton) has graduated from college and she is working as an engineer . She has a strange job for a woman. She is a demolition expert and she is given a job by her dad at a remote hotel. The hotel is going to be demolished and she is there to supervise. She meets a couple of the tenants. One of them, Mary(Deborah Kara Unger) is in charge of the hotel. She lives with her son, Jimmy(Cameron Bright) who is a loner kid. Mary shows her around and she sees some of the other tenants who aren't too happy about being evicted.She starts to hear noises from the walls in the place and she knows that this is the same hotel where those poor people were buried alive in the walls. Jimmy tells her that the architect still lives upstairs and he shows her his apartment. She is spooked by all these goings on. She discovers that Jimmy's dad was one of the victims in the walls. It becomes obvious that the young guy fancies her and he tries to make a move on her which she rejects. Her boyfriend, peter(Noam Jenkins) shows up to help her. He looks around the architects apartment with her and they discover a secret passageway in the floor. Sam goes down it and she discovers a secret room. She talks to Mary about it and Mary tells her about her husband etc. Peter thinks that Sam should leave and she agrees with him.Before they go, Jimmy gives her a book that belonged to the architect and it shows that there is a huge open space in the middle of the hotel. She finds a huge hole in the middle of the hotel and Jimmy falls down it. Her boyfriend gets killed while they are trying to save him and Sam ends up down in the hole. The architect is down there too. He is being kept there by Mary and Jimmy. The film really gets silly from this point on as Jimmy keeps Sam down there and she talks to the architect. It is really bad...The ending is lame too.Not a great movie. I didn't like it much at all. It started well and then it took a nosedive and bombed. It just wasn't very scary and it was more laughable than anything else. Mischa Barton spent the whole movie looking miserable and malnourished..Boring. I am giving this one a 3/10.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

I was just surfing the net and I came across a trailer for this movie called Zombieland. I watched the trailer and now I can't wait to see it. It's a horror/comedy and its obvious what it's about- ZOMBIES!!It stars Woody Harrelson and Bill Murray. It will be released in October so I will be waiting to see that! Watch the trailer and see what you think. It looks like great fun! Enjoy...

Saturday, August 22, 2009

This film is directed by Jack Messitt and it stars nobody you would know. It is the kind of movie that you would expect to be better than it really is.

The film begins with an old man who is in a mental institution. He is brought into a room and a movie is put on for him. We find out that the man is obsessed with this movie that he made in the 1970's. The man starts to tear at his own skin and there is blood all over the place. One of the doctors comes into the hospital to find the place covered in blood and dead bodies everywhere.We cut to 5 years later and the madman who is called Radford(Arthur Roberts) is on the loose.His movie, The Dark Beneath, is being shown for the first time in years and there is a cop called Barrons(Jon Briddell) is at the cinema waiting for Radford to show up. The doctor, Dr.Wayne(Micahel Swan) is there too. There are a group of kids at the movie including Bridget(Rebekah Brandes) who is in charge of the cinema, but she decides to watch the horror movie with her boyfriend, Josh(Daniel Bonjour) and some pals. There is also a biker couple in the cinema.The movie begins and it is about a guy and three girls who have a van. They are driving along when it breaks down in the middle of nowhere. The guy has to go and get help so he sees a house and he knocks on the door. A woman answers and she invites him in.There is some creepy guy in the basement sharpening a tool which is not to be used it the garden! The poor young guy happens to bump into the psycho killer and he gets to be the first to test out the new tool! Needless to say, he ends up dead.Meanwhile, in real life, one of the staff goes down to the basement of the movie theatre to get something and he runs into the killer who has somehow come out of the movie and he is larger than life and ready to kill some teens!!

The rest of the movie concentrates on the movie goers trying to escape from the killer who is just going around with his tool and sticking it into anyone who gets in his way!The movie switches between what is on the screen and real life and it gets a bit annoying after a while not to mention confusing. People begin to drop like flies and the killer seems to pop up around every corner. The cop meets his end and so does most of the others. They manage to rip the film off the reel, but the killer is still there. He captures Bridget and her brother Timmy. He seems to thrive on fear and when he sees that she doesn't fear him, he gets mad. They manage to escape the house which is in the movie and they run. Bridget throws Timmy through the screena nd he lands safely back in reality while she is left to face the killer..So, the cops turn up and they find the other cop's gun and they think he is to blame for it all. Timmy tries to tell them the truth, but they don't believe him...

This movie was okay, but it was nothing special. The switching between the movie and real life became irritating after a while and this movie was mediocre.I am giving it a meagre 5/10.

Friday, August 21, 2009

So, we are back in Hell's Kitchen for another week. Last week, Tek was kicked off after a really bad service. The women crumbled last week so let's hope they have their act together this week.

This episode begins with Tenille who is angry that she was chosen for elimination last week. She doesn't want to go home and she is annoyed that the others ganged up on her and chose her.Chef Ramsay has to talk to Amanda and tell her that she should make more of an effort and try and bounce back. She tells him that she will, but that remains to be seen. So, the first challenge is to make a low fat meal under 700 calories. There are two nutritionists there to supervise. So, the guys and the girls set to make their meals, but the women win hands down. The men have to go shopping for ingredients on some bike thingy and then they have the prep the women's and the men's kitchens. Robert has a bad turn after the cycle and he has to go to hospital.

Chef Ramsay tells the cooks that Robert won't be back for service as he is in the hospital. The others are worried. The guys are worried because they are down one guy. Service begins and the ladies know that they have to do better than last week. They seem to be on top and the guys seem to be in trouble. Jim is serving up bad food and Chef Ramsay thinks that he just doesn't care. Jim is too easy-going and he seems too chilled out in the kitchen. Next, Tenille gets shouted at when she cooks too much spinach and she gets into a shouting match with Chef Ramsay. He tells her to get out of the kitchen and they have a confrontation outside. He can't get a word in edge ways with her, but they manage to resolve it.In the ladies kitchen, Sabrina is sending out raw pork which is a huge mistake. Then she sends out under-cooked lamb. She is a bit thick, I think. All talk and no substance.

Andy really messes up his fish and Chef Ramsay is disgusted. Both teams have to shut down the kitchen and nobody wins. They each have to choose one person to go home and the girls choose Sabrina and the guys choose Andy. Chef Ramsay doesn't agree with their choices and he chooses Jim to go home. He thinks that Jim has no passion and that he was just like a robot in the kitchen..I can agree with that...So, that's it for another week....

Thursday, August 20, 2009

This movie was not really great in my opinion. I didn't think that it was put together very well and I didn't like the characters. But, there were some okay moments in it. It was directed by John Simpson and it stars Keir O Donnell and Katheryn Winnick.The movie revolves around three high school friends. The first story begins with a guy, Rob(Tad Hilgenbrink) and girl, Shelby(Laura Breckenridge) travelling in a car along the interstate. They are trying to get home. They are part of a convoy and they all stop to refuel at a gas station. There is a trucker and another guy in a jeep. The mild-mannered guy in the jeep chats to Rob for a few minutes and then goes into the gas station. The trucker looks mean and suspicious and the guys think that he is a bit weird. He suggests a shortcut around the interstate and the guys decide to follow him. Shelby sees a girl in the back of his truck and she holds up a HELP ME sign. Shelby and Rob get the fright of their lives when she jumps from the truck and onto their car. The guy in the jeep stops and he and Shelby try and help the girl while Rob chases after the trucker to get his number plates. He loses the trucker and he goes back to the spot where his girlfriend was only to find the guy from the jeep on the ground and the girls gone. The guy tells Rob that the trucker came back and took the girls. The two guys take his jeep and drive to a shack where they find the trucker who is on the phone. The trucker comes out and the guy from the jeep hits him across the head and kills him. Rob looks in the back seat of the car to find Shelby and the other girl!!!He is too late to save them...We cut to another story which begins at a house where a young girl, Tabitha(Katheryn Winnick) lets herself in. She finds her two cousins alone in the house. The babysitter has gone, they tell her and she has to take care of them. She is startled by a knock on the door and there is some guy in a raincoat looking for the babysitter. Tabitha tells him that she has gone and that she doesn't know where. He goes away then. she puts the kids to bed and she goes into the guestroom where there are loads of clown toys including a life-size one. She is freaked out by it and she feels weird. She doesn't see it moving behind her back and when she her aunt calls her and she tells her about it, her aunt tells her that there is no life-size clown toy in the house. Tabitha freaks out and she hides from the strange clown. It tries to attack her and the boys. Tabitha finds the body of the babysitter and she almost gets caught by the clown, but she escapes...So, the next story is about a girl called Lisa(Jessica Lucas) whose flatmate has gone missing. she goes up to a big hotel which looks like some haunted house and tries to find her only to get caught by some lunatic. She finds her friends there and she is attacked by a crazy person. We cut back to Tabitha who for some reason is in a cell and some woman tells her that her friends are there too. She tells her that she knows the three girls went to school together. So, the nutter comes out of his hiding place and he has the three girls. He kills the other two and Tabitha escapes after a fight with him.This movie was a bit of a mess in places. There was a lot going on and a lot not explained. I liked the fact that there were three different stories. It reminded me of The Twilight Zone etc. But, the actual movie and the characters were poor. I am giving this one a paltry 4/10.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

This movie was unknown to me before I decided to watch it. I hadn't heard anything about it. It is directed by a guy called David Winning, a Canadian director who has done a lot of TV programmes. I thought that this movie was more like a made for TV movie than anything else. That's not to say that it isn't a good movie. I found it mediocre but I have to say that I liked the Swamp Devil itself. I thought that the special effects were very good, it was more the story that I didn't love.We are shown a young girl in the town of Gibbington, Vermont. She is in the woods near a swamp when she is grabbed by something or someone and she disappears. We cut to present day where a 17 year old girl is racing through the woods as if being chased by something. She is screaming and terrified. Her dad and some other local folks are racing to find her. They find her, but they are too late. She is floating in the swamp, dead. Of course, the locals think that her killer is an old man called Howard Blaime(Bruce Dern) who is a bit strange and they hunt for him to bring him in and accuse him of the murder(No need for proof so).Melanie(Cindy Sampson) is in bed at home when she is called by an old friend of hers, Jimmy(Nicolas Wright) who tells her that her dad is very sick and that he is dying. He tells her that she needs to come home to see him. Melanie is reluctant because she doesn't get along with her dad who went funny after her mother's death. She goes back to the town of Gibbington, Vermont where she grew up and lived until she was 12. She meets her old pal Jimmy who gets into her car and she drives into town with him. He tells her that he lied about her dad being sick.She is horrified but he explains to her that her dad, Howard, is being accused of murder and that he needs her at the moment. She decides to stay and try and help her estranged father.

So, she moves into his shack in the woods and she wonders where she can find him. He is living in the woods and trying to stay out of sight as the posse combs the woods looking for him with rifles.Melanie and Jimmy go into the local diner, Shelley's and they meet Jimmy's mom, Shelley. She remembers Melanie from years ago. Melanie thinks that she is a bit strange. Meanwhile, in the woods, one of the posse runs into the Swamp Devil which is thought to be a local legend, but who is very real, and he gets himself killed. Melanie reaches her dad's shack and she is inside when she is confronted by a female cop Jolene(Allison Graham). Then Sheriff Nelson(James Kidnie) shows up and they talk to her about her dad and ask her is she knows something about where he is, but she denies it.So, she asks Jimmy to stay over as she is nervous on her own and he obliges. She wakes up in the morning and he has gone. She tells the cops about him, but they don't know him. Sheriff Nelson meets Jimmy and he is curious about him. Melanie finds out that her dad has been saying that there is a Swamp Devil and that it is responsible for the deaths in the town, but nobody believes him. Then the female cop shows her a picture of men sitting around a fire. Her dad is in the picture and so is Melanie's dad. The cop tells her that all of the other men met with accidents and that the only one left is her father. The Sheriff meets his end when he comes across the Swamp Devil. Jimmy and Melanie find her dad in the woods and he tells Jimmy to get away from his daughter. Melanie is confused, but Jimmy shows his true colours. HE is the Swamp Devil!!!They run away from it and they hide. Jolene is on the trail also and she discovers the Sheriff in the swamp.

Howard tells Melanie that the Swamp Devil killed her mother and that it left a note for him saying that it would come for him last. His time has come now and the Swamp Devil wants him. They run away from it and discover that it can't come past the city limits. They think that they had outsmarted it but they get too close and it snatches Melanie. Howard goes after it along with Jolene. They try and get Melanie free, but Jimmy is too clever. They try and get away when Melanie gets free and it chases them to the city limits once again. This time Howard hits it with his car and he supposedly kills it. The movie ends with Jimmy's mother at the swamp, witnessing the resurrection of her son/Swamp Devil!So, while I didn't love this movie, it was entertaining so I will be kind and give it a 6/10.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

This cult movie was directed by Lucio Fulci who is a well known horror director who is famous for his movies The Beyond and The House by The Cemetery. This movie was edited because of some of the scenes of sex and violence. There is a very seedy atmosphere throughout this movie and it seems like a cross between soft porn and a horror movie.So, the action begins with a man walking his dog in New York City. His dog is fetching a stick and bringing it back to him except that the last time, the dog brings back a human female hand. We cut to a cop Fred Williams(Jack Hedley) who is investigating a case of a murdered young woman. He is asking the young lady's landlady and she tells Fred that she overheard a phone conversation between the young lady and a person with a strange duck-like voice. We cut to a young lady who is on her bicycle. She cycles onto the Staten Island Ferry and she begins talking to someone who has a strange duck-like voice. She ends up dead. Lieutenant Williams goes to the morgue and the coroner tells him that there are other similar deaths to hers and that they might have a serial killer on their hands.Fred goes to a university to talk to a Professor Davis who promises to work with him on the case to get a profile of the killer. Now the movie takes a bizarre turn with a woman, Jane(Alessandra Delli Colli) at a live sex show. She sees a man(Howard Ross) who is looking at her as she gets herrecorder out to record the sounds of the couple having sex. He has two fingers missing. After the show, the female performer retires to her room where the lights have gone out. She feels that there is someone there with her and she is killed by the duck man... The Lieutenant gets a call from Daffy Duck and he tells the cop that he has killed again. So, then we cut to Jane and her husband who likes her night time activities..she gives him the tape of the live sex show. She goes to a bar and gets fondled by some punks.This lady has a serious problem!!We see a young woman called Fay(Almanta Keller) on the subway alone and the strange man with the missing fingers is looking at her. She gets nervous and tries to run away from him. She thinks that she has escaped him when she runs into the killer duck. He stabs her leg and she runs. She wakes up in the hospital. She sees her boyfriend coming in and she tells him that she had a nightmare in which he was the killer and that he killed her in her nightmare. He laughs it off and they talk. Fay tells the cops that the killer has to be the guy with two fingers missing as he was the only one around. The cops start to look for him. They don't know that at that moment, he is in a sleazy motel with Jane who wants him to have sex with her while she is tied out. Of course she realises her huge mistake when she hears on the radio that the cops are looking for him. She manages to untie herself and get away but she meets the killer and that is that.The cops find her and they find that the man is called Mickey Scellenda a Greek guy and they go through his apartment but all they find is porn mags. Davis goes to see Fay who is home from the hospital and ask her some more questions. He wonders if the killer is Mickey and he doubts it because the killer is clever and Mickey is not. When he leaves, she is alone and she is attacked by Scellenda but her boyfriend, Peter comes back in time. So the cops get another call from duck man and he tells them that he is going to dedicate a murder to Williams. He kills his gal pal, Kitty and plays it over the phone to him. The cops discover Scellenda's dead body and they realise that he is not their man at all.We see Fay visiting a young child in hospital. She has a rare bone disease and she is very sick. Davis is there with Williams and he puts the pieces together. The killer is Peter. He has been murdering people because of his anger about his daughter's illness. He targets women because he knows that his daughter will never be a woman and enjoy life. He tries to kill Fay but she injures him. He is finished off by a shot to head by Williams. The end scene has little Suzy calling her dad on the phone, but he is not going to answer....A strange movie, but not too bad. It is kinda seedy and like it was made cheaply, but it is still a good horror movie to see. I am going to give it a 6/10.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

There are so many horror movies that I like and plenty that I don't like. I am going to choose my best/worst and then I want you to let me know yours. If you agree/disagree with me, then let me know.I have reviewed most of the movies so if you want to read my reviews, just click on the names...Okay lets start with the worst horror movies. There are lots, believe me, but I have just picked a few that I think are pretty bad. I watched A Night to Dismember(1983) recently and it was total rubbish. Some other examples of crappy movies are: Flu Bird Horror (2008), Riding the Bullet(2004), Shutter(2008), Mirrors(2008), The Happening(2008), Pulse (2006), The Reaping (2007). There are so many others, but they are just a few. Of course, there are the endless remakes which are so bad, they are funny. Some examples of these are: Last House on the Left (2009), My Bloody Valentine(2009), Wicker Man(2006), Psycho(1998), The Fog(2005), Prom Night(2008), The Hills Have Eyes (2006) and of course, Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003).

Friday, August 14, 2009

Well, it's that time again. Another week has passed since we were in Hell's Kitchen. Last week, Lovely was sent packing and not before time either. She was a lazy cow and she deserved to be kicked off.This week, we are back to the usual challenge. They have to come with an appetiser and two entrees for a party that is taking place for an officer coming back from Iraq. His wife comes in and she tells them what he likes and what type of food they should be cooking for him. The guys team is led by Robert and the girls team is led by Suzanne. Suzanne bulldozes everyone out of the way and she does things her way and doesn't listen to her teammates when they try and suggest a few things that they could do. Robert, on the other hand works well with his team and they fare a lot better. They win the challenge and the girls are not happy with Suzanne, especially Tenille, who had all of her ideas shot down by Suzanne.The guys are treated to a day out flying fighter planes and the girls have to get the place ready for the party along with Gordon's wife, Tana Ramsay who makes a special appearance. They are not happy and they are all moaning etc while the guys are having the time of their lives flying the fighter planes. The guys come back on a high and the girls are blowing up balloons and getting things ready. The guys are determined to do well tonight against the girls. They all see the officer turn up for his surprise party and Chef Ramsay tells them that he wants them to do their best this evening and not let him down.

So, service starts fine until the orders start flying in. Jim gets bombarded by orders for steak and he finds it very hard to keep up with all of the orders. He seems to be in is own little world as Chef Ramsay asks him something and he doesn't answer. The others step in to try and help him. Kevin takes charge and he helps Jim.Kevin seems very capable, but sometimes he annoys me when he tries to take over everything, but I guess he is a good cook. On the girls team, Tek has a total meltdown and she can't cope. She just lets everything fall apart on her station and the whole team collapses. Amanda serves up raw lobster and she disappoints Chef Ramsay too. But Tek just lets it all go and the guys team have to step in to help the girls get their food out. The girls are very disappointed in their performance and in Tek.So when they lose, there are no surprises. There are also no surprises who goes up for elimination. Tek is chosen but Tenille is chosen too, much to her disgust. She feels hard done by and she voices her concerns. Chef Ramsay sends her back into line and he calls out Amanda. She starts crying which is silly and he almost sends her packing, but he considers Tek to be the weakest link and she is sent home. She really couldn't handle it anymore and it was a good decision... I will be back next week with more cooking and bitching from Hell's Kitchen!

Thursday, August 13, 2009

I've been looking forward to seeing this movie as it is directed by Quentin Tarantino and it stars Brad Pitt. It is about Nazi Germany and Brad Pitt leads a group of Jewish-American soldiers who like to kill Nazis. Here is the trailer. It looks good from what I can see.. It is out August 21st so enjoy the trailer..

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The last time we were in Hell's Kitchen, Tony and Joseph got the boot. So, we were left with Dave with his wrist hurt and Kevin with his ankle hurt.Would the men's team be able to manage with two men at half-strength?

So, this week we see Lovely talking about Chef Ramsay and telling us that he likes her and that he wants her to do well and that is why he didn't kick her off...She has a high opinion of herself and she hasn't a chance in hell of winning it!The men are bitching about Andy. They all think that he should have gone home already as he is dragging the team down. The next morning, the cooks are told that they are not good team players which is true and Chef Ramsay pairs them off to get them used to working together. Of course, there are people who don't like other people etc.. They have to make a certain amount of sausages and it is boys against girls. So, they work together and most of the teams get along fine, even though they don't like each other. One pair doesn't produce any sausages and that is Robert and Jim. The girls win the task and the men are really annoyed. The girls are treated to a beer tasting festival and the guys have to clean the dorms.

Things get heated between the men and Robert and Kevin get in a shouting match. Robert is annoyed because they lost and everyone tells him to calm down(Watch the Clip Above). He keeps it up when they are cleaning outside and he starts kicking stuff around. Dave hears from the doctor that he will have to get a plaster cast on his wrist and that it will be hard to move that arm at all. He has to think about whether he wants to be in Hell's Kitchen with it and he talks to Gordon. He decides to stay and work through the pain. I like Dave because he seems to work hard and he won't give up which is a good thing. The service begins and there are some 'celebs' at the restaurant which puts extra pressure on them.Jim and Ariel have to serve an appetiser before they can let any other food go out and Ariel does well, but Jim is behind. He is holding everything up. Tek messes up her pasta and it is too salty.Robert is doing well and he is pleased with himself but Lovely is messing up by not seasoning her food. She is a bit of a fool, I think.

Andy cooks his lamb wrong and Chef Ramsay is not impressed. Neither is Robert and he starts mouthing off. Chef Ramsay has to tell him to shut up.Lovely can't remember what she is cooking! Andy finally gets his lamb out and it is okay. Dave comes back from the hospital and helps out as best he can. The men finish their service first and they win the task.So, the girls have to choose someone for elimination. Tek and Lovely are both nominated to go home. Lovely gets kicked out and I am happy with that. She was lazy and she thought that she was way better than she really is. She actually looked surprised that she was going home...

Anyway, they are beginning to drop like flies now.. I will be back soon with the next installment of Hell's Kitchen..