Hey – I forgot I had this blog!

Nine days without posting – if I don’t write more often, I’ll never clog up people’s inboxes.

Right. After spending a few days away, I missed a week of lower league column for Born Offside, and compensated with Born Offside’s first ever Lower League Fortnight.

Knowing my issues with reliability and consistency, I’m sure it won’t be the last time that happens.
This issue covered transfer movements, changes in management, Bournemouth paying a huge £800,000 transfer fee…it’s crazy, a tell thee.

I’m so happy to have signed for Bournemouth. Yayyyyyyy.

This past week, Fabio Capello, the Italian manager of the England national football team, walked out. It was the culmination of a long series of irritating events – the media attacked Capello for not walking on water, Wayne Rooney did something stupid and Capello didn’t stop him from doing it so is therefore dangerously incompetent, John Terry may or may not have said something potentially hugely offensive and faces a trial for it, Capello wanted to stick by him, his bosses didn’t, Capello told Italian television he wanted Terry to remain as captain.

In the end, after a meeting Capello and the English Football Association decided to call it quits.
The English football media has a very strange attitude to foreign football, which is essentially ‘if we didn’t see it, it didn’t happen’.
Leo Messi’s Barcelona are on Sky Sports every other weekend, so they count, and Messi can be entered into the running for best player in the world, and it’s okay to consider the Spanish champions the best team ever.
But Italian football generally doesn’t get that much attention over here, so who cares if Capello won four league titles, three Italian cups and a European Cup in five years? That’s Italy! What do they know about football anyway?
And who cares if Capello won league titles in both of his seasons in Real Madrid, in two seperate spells, only to get fired the following summer by insane owners? Who else is there in Spain besides Madrid anyway?

One of these two is Fabio Capello. I think that’s him on the left, with his bra strap exposed

And, last Monday, I attended the now infamous press conference where Steven Spielberg revealed he has been helping to conceal the existence of alien life for decades.
I’m sure you’ve seen all the headlines, and yes, I know it seems obvious in retrospect with the blatant pro-alien bias in ET and Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

But if you want the story from someone who was there when he announced his confession, click here for the story of Spielberg’s shameful secret.

He just carries that poster around with him everywhere he goes. If I’d directed Saving Private Ryan, I’d probably do the same