Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Raiders Dedicate Season to the Executed

Does this even surprise anybody? Like you have to decide if this is even news at this point. What else is this guy going to say other than maybe "Go Dodgers?"

The best part was this statement released by the Raiders today.The Raiders organization would like to say that we are saddened by the sudden passing of Robert Charles Comer. He was a true Raiders fan. By that, we mean that he spent a lot of time in jail, like most of our great fans. Prison walls cannot contain the excitement over Raiders football.

The Raiders are pleased that Comer's last words were "Go Raiders" which shows the greatness of the Raiders organization. To our knowledge nobody has ever been put to death uttering the words, "Go Seahawks" or "Go Lions." That's because the Raiders are the most fearsome organization in the world. Though he leaves our world and his Earthly body, the Arizona prison system can't kill the spirit of the Raiders, who will return to greatness under Lane Kiffin. As for his victim, we hear he was a snitch and a Raiders Hater, anyway, so it's all good. Bless Robert Charles Comer as the Raiders will dedicate the 2007 season to his memory.

7 comments:

What? Did the prison only have black and white TVs and aluminum foil antennas? The new millennium last words should have been "Go Bengals" or "Smoke another one Ricky" or "Pac Man's been framed". "Go Raiders"? How 70s-ish!

The Autumn Wind is a Hater!

The Hater Nation is back where it belongs. Turns out, we were too lazy to sellout. So unless somebody wants to give us $100K per year to tell McKenzie Phillips' jokes, we are probably going to be found here for a while.

Last and Ten Obvious Admissions We Would Like to See

10.Peter King admits it ... he really wants to sex up Brett Favre. And he wants to give Tom Brady a coffee enema.

9. Cowboys owner Jerry Jones admits that his face is as real as Joan Rivers' face.