Yo History Buffs ! I need a little bit of help with my A.P. US History Paper

So I'll post what I have below and you can sort of help me, here are the directions

Portfolio #1: Rebels: Prepare first of six portfolio assignments. Choose one of the following individuals and determine the extent to which the person could be considered a rebel. Possible figures include, but are not limited to: Roger Williams, Anne Hutchison, Nathaniel Bacon, Pope, Jacob Leisler, and Metacomet. Write a three to four page essay on this topic and turn it in for a grade.

Key to this assignment is the inclusion of a thesis and plenty of support for your argument.

Due Date: October 10, 2008

Here's what I have so far

A rebel is defined as a person who refuses allegiance to, resists, or rises in arms against the government or ruler of his or her country. A rebel is someone who sniffs out the injustices of something and tries to right the wrong no matter what or how bad extreme the consequences may be. A rebel could be somewhat of a leader and an honorable figure. Nathaniel Bacon embodies this word to the fullest and led one of the most influential rebellions in the history of the world. He saw injustices and broken promises and capitalized on these governmental weaknesses. Bacon became a rebel because of harsh living conditions in the Chesapeake region and having a corrupt leader in Governor William Berkeley. During the late sixteen hundreds High taxes, low prices for tobacco, and resentment against special privileges given those close to the governor, Berkeley, provided the fire for the uprising. Also, Berkeley was an inept leader; he was unable to defend against frontier attacks by the Native Americans. Bacon knew something had to be done so he created and lead the biggest rebellion in North American history. He led his supporters to attack...

JoeySteel

10/9/08 1:33:24AM

I am a social studies teacher.

Bacon is WIDELY considered the first right wing populist to lead a rebellion.

The essence of this assignment is less about the individual you choose, and more about your understanding of the different elements of what a rebel is.

I would not say that Bacon led one of the most influential rebellions of the history of the world. Firstly this is a wild accusation and needs deep support, which your essay prompt was not calling for. In supporting this claim you will digress, in what would be a meaningful digression, but not attentive to what your thesis should be. This sort of digression is exactly what limits getting a 5 on your test. Secondly as a historian I find it to be an unfounded claim.

You should clearly idetnify, more succintly than you do, what is the essence of a rebel, then systematically how Bacon fits that definition, and in what ways he has shortcomings.

questions worth considering?Do you have to be popular and have followers to be a rebel?If you fail are you still a rebel? Better yet, if you succeed are you still a rebel, or have you become a revolutionary? Does a rebel have to be progressive? Can you be a conservative rebel?

Also there are some grammar errors in you introduction. You should be less dictionary based and more formal in your approach. Don't use the word sniff. Just come out and say what you mean, BE DIRECT, confident and assertive.

Imagine this paper is a fight, your throwing a lot of extra spinning back fists, when you need to keep that jab out there, firm, and consistent.

PS. Bacon's rebellion is a very complex and in my view reactionary rebellion, I think it is worth bringing out the question of his values given the context of the rebellion. Rebels are very much defined by their times, what would be rebellions in the 1670s might be common sense in 1800.

I would love to help more if you need,

hippysmacker

10/9/08 9:27:22AM

I actually had to write a similar paper in college, but the professor let us choose our own subject ( pending his pre-approval) and I chose Jesus. Got an AFrom the list I would choose Anne Hutchinson, as she espoused the the idea of Grace before works before it was common, and that is probably one of the most profound ideas of change in Christianity's history. Also, she is only one I know enough about personally, to just write the paper without studying.

hotrodttt

10/10/08 12:24:11AM

Posted by hippysmackerAlso, she is only one I know enough about personally, to just write the paper without studying.

Yeah same for me, I only know about Bacon as he's the only rebel we've discussed in depth

tberg420

10/10/08 11:24:36AM

Posted by JoeySteel

I am a social studies teacher.

And I thought all Social Studies teachers did was Coach High School Football. Well said sir!