Loretta LaRoche: Bring back human phone operators

I wonder where all the old-fashioned telephone operators are. Have they gone to some distant planet where an evolved species has recognized the unbelievable power of “real” human connection?

Loretta LaRoche

I wonder where all the old-fashioned telephone operators are. Have they gone to some distant planet where an evolved species has recognized the unbelievable power of “real” human connection?

I hope so, because it would be so sad if their talents were simply left unnoticed or unused. I loved picking up the phone and hearing a real person whom I could interact with. Oh, there are still some pockets of humans left. My cell phone service has directory assistance with real people who are actually interested in helping. The same company uses a clone for its home service.

I know that all companies have to monitor their bottom line, but should it be at the mercy of their customers’ mental well-being? Every time I pick up the phone to access someone’s number, I know I will probably end up with my blood pressure and heart rate maxed out. I wouldn’t be surprised if I end up in a straight jacket some day after talking to the “human wannabe.”

Who ever created this aberration seems to have forgotten to test its hearing. The other day it asked for city and state. I responded Colorado and it repeated back, colonoscopy.

I initially remained calm but after a few minutes of bantering back and forth, I finally said the magic word “operator” and was connected to a real person. She seemed to understand me immediately and connected me without a problem.

Clones aside, another “made for madness” device is the voice mail that has to tell you about all the services the organization offers before you can reach what you need. Why do I need to know where to get my dry cleaning done, get a pap smear, have my car detailed or be able to accumulate points to go to Guatemala as a result of their new and improved services? I called to get my bank balance.

Why do I need to listen to a minute or so of added amenities that have nothing to do with my checking account? What’s next?

I’m sure when all phones have visual components, we’ll all have to watch commercials and previews of coming perks until our eyes cross. Or maybe – just maybe – someone will invent a contraption that allows you to mute all the nonsense so you can get want you really wanted , the information you called for. What a thought!