If you’re using a pantene bottle to “assist” you in times of need, then you need to make sure that the cap remains closed. You’re just asking for a UTI or Yeast Infection.

That being said, I will have to think about your offer of your vagina to me. I’m assuming you’re doing so in the attempt to show me that not all sex has to feel like puppy murder (which isn’t good). I’ll get back to you.