5 Reasons to Choose Jewish Preschool

Early childhood is a great time to expose our kids to Jewish education. The results can last a lifetime.

Preschool is the first big decision we make for our children, and it can be a tough one. Add in considerations about choosing a Jewish preschool and the decision gets trickier. How do we balance our desire for our kids’ to learn about their heritage with our wish for them to know about the wider world? Some of us fear we’re not “Jewish” enough to choose a Jewish preschool.

Yet the Torah has no such qualms. Early childhood is a great time to expose our kids to Jewish education. The results can last a lifetime.

Here are five reasons to consider Jewish preschool for your child, backed up by 3,300 years of Jewish tradition and modern research.

1. Early Impressions Count

The experiences we have as young children form the basis of what we regard as comforting and safe for years to come. If we want our kids to feel that Jewish rituals are familiar and enjoyable, preschool is the time to start sharing them.

This doesn’t have to be heavy: singing Jewish songs, talking about holidays and Jewish values all create long-lasting impressions in our children. It helps create a memory of being at home in a Jewish setting. Learning about Jewish concepts such as tzedakah (charity), kind deeds, and saying thank you also helps teach our kids that Jewish tradition has something to say about the issues and conflicts that they face in daily life.

2. The “Thirty Million Word Gap”

Even very young kids are capable of learning a great deal. By the time they’re ready for kindergarten, many preschoolers have mastered complex skills like sounding out words, reading, counting, and performing sophisticated tasks like cutting, pouring, and measuring. Jewish preschools have the added benefit of teaching Hebrew songs and prayers, and educating kids about Jewish holidays as well.

Adding this extra level of education can have some less obvious benefits, too. In one famous study, researchers looked at the number of words that children heard in their early years, and compared this with later academic success. They wondered why kids from more privileged environments often did better in school than deprived children, and found that one of the main factors was that kids from wealthy families were exposed to many more words each day than poorer children. Over the course of the first three years, the difference was a whopping 30 million words. This “Thirty Million Word Gap” explained much of the lag in poorer children’s academic success, even years later.

Jewishly, many of us have our own Thirty Million Word Gap. Choosing a Jewish preschool can help ensure close this gap for our kids, and help them know more about their heritage.

3. Clay Candlesticks and Lumpy Challah

One of the most important objects kids in Jewish preschools bring home is clay Shabbat candlesticks. (In my own home, they’ve joined tie-dyed matzah covers, a wooden menorah - which seemed to me to be a fire hazard, but we used it anyway - and weekly loaves of lumpy challah.)

The ritual objects that kids bring home with them often help start new family traditions. One dad I know told me that when his daughter brought home challah loaves from preschool each Friday, he and his wife started making the blessing over it. To make the occasion even more special, they eventually started lighting Shabbat candles and saying the blessing over grape juice before dinner, too. Before they knew it, they were celebrating with their own weekly Shabbat dinner.

Even when families don’t go so far, the Jewish ritual objects kids make can help start a dialogue in the family. One friend of mine told me she had a big discussion about conservation and nature with her kids when they learned about the importance of trees on the Jewish holiday Tu B’shvat. Another friend said she and her husband started giving charity regularly when their daughter brought home a tzedaka box she’d made from a can in school.

4. Find a Good Friend

Preschool is much more than the hours spent in the classroom. It tends to spill over into playdates and social events, and – in many cases – friendships that endure for years. This isn’t only true for the kids themselves; since young kids require supervision, their friendships often extend to their parents, who get to know each other and bond during those intense preschool years.

Getting to know other families who are interested in their kids getting a Jewish education, and who are grappling with some of the same issues we are, helps shape us, and give us resources as we continue to grow and evolve – through the preschool years, and beyond.

5. “Do You Know?”

Recent studies have pinpointed an unexpected source of resilience in kids. About a decade ago, Sarah Duke, a psychologist who worked with children with learning disabilities, noticed that children who were familiar with their family histories were better able to face challenges and overcome setbacks. Intrigued, her husband Marshall, a psychology professor at Emery University, eventually organized and conducted a wide-scale academic study. Dubbed the “Do You Know?” study, he and a colleague measured how familiar children were with their family narratives, and correlated this with their emotional health and happiness.

“We were blown away,” Dr. Duke reported. “Being familiar with family history was the single biggest predictor of emotional health and happiness.”

Jewish preschools give kids a clear sense of their history and identity in the world. Learning about Jewish history helps kids understand the world, and their place in it. It helps them understand that they’re not alone, but part of a larger community, which has overcome adversity and celebrates life. Knowing where they come from helps children make sense of challenges they see around them, and gives them the security to know they’re connected to other people.

As our children grow up, being able to answer “Do You Know?” might be one of the greatest gifts we can give them to help them navigate their way.

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About the Author

Yvette Alt Miller earned her B.A. at Harvard University. She completed a Postgraduate Diploma in Jewish Studies at Oxford University, and has a Ph.D. In International Relations from the London School of Economics. She lives with her family in Chicago, and has lectured internationally on Jewish topics. Her book Angels at the table: a Practical Guide to Celebrating Shabbat takes readers through the rituals of Shabbat and more, explaining the full beautiful spectrum of Jewish traditions with warmth and humor. It has been praised as "life-changing", a modern classic, and used in classes and discussion groups around the world.

The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 4

(4)
Renee,
May 2, 2013 6:37 PM

Are you kidding me?

You make it seem as though Jewish parents send their children to public schools because we can't tell the difference between an education that is ideal versus an education that is "good enough." Are you going to pay for my kids to attend private school? As long as the burden of paying for a Jewish education rests on the parents--with next to no help from the community--Jewish kids will continue to attend public schools. The Head Start program is free (for those who qualify...and believe me, if you qualify for these services you can in no way afford Jewish school).

Talk to me when you have a plan for helping fascilitate community pre-schools (such as those in which the parents can volunteer time and services in lieu of paying cash).

(3)
Beverly Kurtin,
May 2, 2013 12:40 AM

Not ALL Jews are wealthy

Oh wow! Sure. Since all Jews are wealthy, we don't have to work for a living and here in Texas there is a Jewish school every half mile.Are you guys nuts? The closest shul was a 2 hour drive and there was no Jewish pre-school anyway.At the time my children were young, the only shuls were quite a schlep from my home. Oh...I have the answer, sell my house and move to the rich part of town.It is always easy for the wealthy to tell the non-wealthy what to do, isn't it? My temper heated up while reading this article.

(2)
Molly,
April 30, 2013 5:48 AM

I know the feeling! We have five kids, and we homeschool. It's the only way to give five kids a Jewish education on one person's salary.

(1)
Anonymous,
April 29, 2013 1:15 PM

costs

I couldn't afford to send any of my three kids to Jewish PreschoolNeither can my kids afford to send their total of seven kids either.

We all made (and make) decent livings but the costs are outrageous.

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I've been striving to get more into spirituality. But it seems that every time I make some progress, I find myself slipping right back to where I started. I'm getting discouraged and feel like a failure. Can you help?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Spiritual slumps are a natural part of spiritual growth. There is a cycle that people go through when at times they feel closer to God and at times more distant. In the words of the Kabbalists, it is "two steps forward and one step back." So although you feel you are slipping, know that this is a natural process. The main thing is to look at your overall progress (over months or years) and be able to see how far you've come!

This is actually God's ingenious way of motivating us further. The sages compare this to teaching a baby how to walk. When the parent is holding on, the baby shrieks with delight and is under the illusion that he knows how to walk. Yet suddenly, when the parent lets go, the child panics, wobbles and may even fall.

At such times when we feel spiritually "down," that is often because God is letting go, giving us the great gift of independence. In some ways, these are the times when we can actually grow the most. For if we can move ourselves just a little bit forward, we truly acquire a level of sanctity that is ours forever.

Here is a practical tool to help pull you out of the doldrums. The Sefer HaChinuch speaks about a great principle in spiritual growth: "The external awakens the internal." This means that although we may not experience immediate feelings of closeness to God, eventually, by continuing to conduct ourselves in such a manner, this physical behavior will have an impact on our spiritual selves and will help us succeed. (A similar idea is discussed by psychologists who say: "Smile and you will feel happy.")

That is the power of Torah commandments. Even if we may not feel like giving charity or praying at this particular moment, by having a "mitzvah" obligation to do so, we are in a framework to become inspired. At that point we can infuse that act of charity or prayer with all the meaning and lift it can provide. But if we'd wait until being inspired, we might be waiting a very long time.

May the Almighty bless you with the clarity to see your progress, and may you do so with joy.

In 1940, a boatload 1,600 Jewish immigrants fleeing Hitler's ovens was denied entry into the port of Haifa; the British deported them to the island of Mauritius. At the time, the British had acceded to Arab demands and restricted Jewish immigration into Palestine. The urgent plight of European Jewry generated an "illegal" immigration movement, but the British were vigilant in denying entry. Some ships, such as the Struma, sunk and their hundreds of passengers killed.

If you seize too much, you are left with nothing. If you take less, you may retain it (Rosh Hashanah 4b).

Sometimes our appetites are insatiable; more accurately, we act as though they were insatiable. The Midrash states that a person may never be satisfied. "If he has one hundred, he wants two hundred. If he gets two hundred, he wants four hundred" (Koheles Rabbah 1:34). How often have we seen people whose insatiable desire for material wealth resulted in their losing everything, much like the gambler whose constant urge to win results in total loss.

People's bodies are finite, and their actual needs are limited. The endless pursuit for more wealth than they can use is nothing more than an elusive belief that they can live forever (Psalms 49:10).

The one part of us which is indeed infinite is our neshamah (soul), which, being of Divine origin, can crave and achieve infinity and eternity, and such craving is characteristic of spiritual growth.

How strange that we tend to give the body much more than it can possibly handle, and the neshamah so much less than it needs!