This is a blog about mental illness where I write about my journey towards healing. My purpose is to empower women in their personal fight in battling depression. Too many women suffer in silence and my desire is to initiate dialogue, understanding and support and to instill hope for families and individuals. Through nutrition, essential oils and my faith, I have found my way towards recovery where I manage my illness and I don't let it manage me.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

IMAGINE yourself climbing Mt.Everest. You can see the summit in the distance when you collapse and there's no way you can go any further. You're completely spent. You have absolutely no more energy left, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, or physically. Out of the corner of your eye you see the Savior (He is there because you humbly and prayerfully invited Him) coming to your aid and He helps you reach the top. I believe we all have a "Mt.Everest" in our lives. At different periods in our lives sometimes our trials are mountains, or hills, or boulders and sometimes they're only annoying pebbles in our shoes. The only reason we make it to the top is due to our Savior's Atonement. There's no way we can make it on our own, nor should we even try. (But we all try to sometimes, don't we? ;) ) My Mt.Everest in my life right now is the bipolar mental illness that I have.

Let me be clear. I AM NOT bipolar. I HAVE a mental illness called bipolar disorder. This disease does not define who I am and I will never say that I am bipolar. My worth is infinite and divine. My value does not come from what I have, what I can do, but from who I am.I am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father.

I have had many promptings that I needed to start a blog about my experiences. One thing has stopped from taking this step is mainly

FEAR.

Hence, the pen name. This blog will be full of very real and raw emotions and I feel I can be more open with a pen name. But should my identity really matter? I don't usually share the fact that I have a mental illness with those that I meet or even some of my closest friends. I have learned the hard way that there are many misconceptions about mental illnesses in general. Hopefully, I can to dispel some of those myths.(September 29, 2015) For the past 5 years I have progressed on my healing journey to the point where I am not ashamed of my disease. It is not something that I need to hide. There are many misconceptions about mental illnesses and I cannot dispel those myths if I choose to hide. Today I am much more open about my disease. There are so many people who suffer, so many families who lives are affected by a family member's mental illness. I promise that your hurt will turn into hope, your despair into determination to fight against the disease, your pain into peace. My name is Amber Martin and I am not my disease.

I hope that through my writing I will be able to learn to trust my Savior by laying this burden at His feet and receive the healing that I desire. Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said,

"Healing blessings come in many ways, each suited to our individual needs, as known to Him who loves us best. Sometimes a “healing” cures our illness or lifts our burden. But sometimes we are “healed” by being given strength or understanding or patience to bear the burdens placed upon us."

I don't think that I will be healed in the way where I will no longer have this disease; but I believe that I will receive my healing through the understanding, patience, and ability to bear this burden with ease.

Please listen to this amazing song by Hilary Weeks called Beautiful Heartbreak . You'll love it. I promise.

Sunday, September 6, 2015

As you may have noticed, several photos on my blog have been removed courtesy of blogspot. Those were stock photos that I own. I am not happy with blogspot that they would just remove those photos without notice. I respect copyright laws. Any photos that I have used from simplehealthytasty.com I have received written permission from the blogger to use her photos on my own blog and referenced the website. (I love her food recipes and they are healthy & taste wonderful too!)

So, blogspot, you are not my friend and I will NOT recommend your company to others.