Simply put…no, nothing is more demoralizing. Well, I guess if some dude skated over your dick, that would be more demoralizing, but this is a close second. Look, everybody knows I’m not a hockey guy. I don’t think I can even name ten players in the league. That being said, I still admire the sport for two reasons, playoffs and fighting. Playoff hockey is without a doubt the best postseason in all of sports. The intensity mixed with the passion from both the players and the fans makes it a religious, borderline erotic experience that simply can’t be matched by any other sport. Then there’s the fighting. The fact that the NHL allows their players to duke it out and settle their squabble on the ice with their fists is simply amazing. There is something poetic about the barbaric simplicity to it all.

So last night, New York Ranger Chris Kreider and Dallas Star Cody Eakin got into a little tussle. If you watch the video above, you can see Kreider rip Eakin’s helmet off, and begin to bash him in his face with his own equipment. Just a diabolical move from Kreider. The only thing worse than losing a fight, is losing a fight while being hit with your own helmet. Totally embarrassing turn of events for poor Cody. While this move is technically illegal, I assumed that just like our legal system and society in general; regular laws, common courtesies, and rules don’t apply to gingers.

Like I said before, I’m not a hockey guy. So I have no idea who or what started the fight, but I sure hell know who finished it. While there was no knockout blow, the disrespect displayed by Kreider makes him the clear victor.

Apparently Kreider was fined the maximum amount under the CBA, which is $5,000, for using the helmet in the fight. How is that the maximum fine? Are you shitting me? I know hockey player salaries aren’t as much as other sports, but $5K is nothing! I don’t know why more players don’t use weapons all the time if the only punishment that will come from it is a measly fine. I would hide sledge hammers, kendo sticks, steel chairs, and barbwire baseball bats in whatever the place where all the players stand off the ice is called if all I’m getting is a $5K fine. It’s like the NHL is begging for a pin fall anywhere/no holds barred/buried alive match with that type of punishment.

P.S – I think the biggest reason why I’m not a hockey guy is that I always miss the goals when I’m watching the game. I swear to god it’s like anytime I turn my head away from the action, even for a second, I miss the goal. I am confident when I say that I have never seen an NHL goal happen live. Ever.