This week’s class will be the last class this year and our Christmas party. Please feel free to bring comestibles, potables, festive play equipment or whatever may aid in our festivities. We will go ahead the the class as planned or stray from the agenda as the muse dictates.

Note: One version of the play posted in our Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing page turned out to be only the first half. It has been replaced with a very fine amateur version of the complete play.

“I can see he’s not in your good books,’ said the messenger.
‘No, and if he were I would burn my library.”

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me.

What, my dear Lady Disdain! are you yet living?

“Then is courtesy a turncoat. But it is certain I am loved of all ladies, only you excepted: and I would I could find in my heart that I had not a hard heart; for, truly, I love none.

Beatrice: A dear happiness to women: they would else have been troubled with a pernicious suitor. I thank God and my cold blood, I am of your humour for that: I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow than a man swear he loves me.

Well, niece, I hope to see you one day fitted with a husband.

Not till God make men of some other metal than earth. Would it not grieve a woman to be overmastered with a pierce of valiant dust? to make an account of her life to a clod of wayward marl? No, uncle, I’ll none: Adam’s sons are my brethren; and, truly, I hold it a sin to match in my kindred.”

I will go on the slightest errand now to the Antipodes that you can devise to send me on; I will fetch you a toothpicker now from the furthest inch of Asia; bring you the length of Prester John’s foot; fetch you a hair off the Great Cham’s beard; do you any embassage to the Pygmies, rather than hold three words’ conference with this harpy. You have no employment for me?

None, but to desire your good company.

O God, sir, here’s a dish I love not: I cannot endure my Lady Tongue.

Come, lady, come; you have lost the heart of Signior Benedick.

Indeed, my lord, he lent it me awhile; and I gave him use for it, a double heart for a single one: marry, once before he won it of me with false dice, therefore your Grace may well say I have lost it.

Tis certain so; the prince wooes for himself.
Friendship is constant in all other things
Save in the office and affairs of love:

Ha. “Against my will I am sent to bid you come into dinner.” There’s a double meaning in that.

Is’t possible? Sits the wind in that corner?

Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.

She’s lim’d, I warrant you: we have caught her, madam.

If it prove so, then loving goes by haps:
Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.

What fire is in mine ears? Can this be true?

I wish my horse had the speed of your tongue.

Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably.

I do love nothing in the world so well as you- is not that strange?

You have stayed me in a happy hour: I was about to protest I loved you.

And do it with all thy heart.

I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest.

Come, bid me do anything for thee.

Tarry, good Beatrice. By this hand, I love thee.

Use it for my love some other way than swearing by it.

Think you in your soul the Count Claudio hath wronged Hero?

Yea, as sure is I have a thought or a soul.

Enough! I am engaged, I will challenge him. I will kiss your hand, and so leave you. By this hand, Claudio shall render me a dear account. As you hear of me, so think of me. Go, comfort your cousin: I must say she is dead; and so, farewell.

When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married.

Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have
belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves.

For it falls out
That what we have we prize not to the worth
Whiles we enjoy it, but being lacked and lost,
Why, then we rack the value, then we find
The virtue that possession would not show us
While it was ours.

When you depart from me sorrow abides and happiness takes his leave.

Is it not strange that sheep’s guts could hail souls out of men’s bodies?

For man is a giddy thing, and this is my conclusion.

A miracle. Here’s our own hands against our hearts. Come, I will have thee, but by this light I take thee for pity.

Language immersionLet’s watch Christopher Hitchens on Thomas Jefferson
Biographer of Jefferson and one of the great wielders of the English language speaks about the “Author of America.” Listen to the language more than the content.

Let’s continue with our previous ongoing projects if they are not yet complete:

Subjunctive Voice

There are two main forms of subjunctive in the English language, the present and past subjunctive. These really have nothing to do with points in the passage of time however. They simply mean different things.

Subjunctive verb forms can be used by the speaker or writer to convey another sense of verb action besides the simple declarative indicative form. They are used to imply that the action is conditional or entirely hypothetical or that it is a demand or supposition. The past form is normally reserved for referring to untrue or non-factual instances.

Past Subjunctive

Past subjunctive is used when the speaker wishes to indicate that the action described is hypothetical, is contrafactual, is untrue – a situation contrary to fact. All forms of the verb “be” become “were”. Other verbs use the past tense, or if already in past tense, the past perfect tense.

For example:

Indicative:

If he was thinking about what he was doing, he would put the lid on in time. (He may have been thinking)

Subjunctive:

If he were thinking about what he was doing… (He clearly wasn’t thinking about it).

If he had been thinking about what he was doing… (subjunctive in past becomes past perfect).

The past subjunctive is also used in a future sense:

Were he to paint it blue first thing in the morning, it might appear intentional.

The speaker can choose to use or not use subjunctive to convey either a fictive or factual impression.

As “were” is already the verb form for second person and plural of the verb “be” in past tense, the presence of the subjunctive is only clear in first and third person singular:

Indicative:

The lieutenant was anxious about the laundry.

Subjunctive:

If the lieutenant were anxious about the laundry he would have put out the platypus.

Indicative:

I am thinking clearly and do it for him.

Subjunctive:

If I were thinking clearly I would do it for him.

If I had been thinking clearly I would have done it for him.

Present Subjunctive

The present subjunctive is used in an order, a request, a decree, or in an “if” clause that is not necessarily contrafactual.

Indicative:

Uncle Cuthbert is

Present subjunctive

Aunt Agatha demanded that Uncle Cuthbert be present at the embalming ceremony.

We could all go home if this be indeed the rabbit we’re looking for.

Boadicea requested that we all be upstanding when we sing the chorus of the prenuptial agreement.

It was suggested that he have his turn-of-the-century diving equipment handy.

The subjunctive verb form is distinguishable from the indicative only in specific cases. In the third person singular of most verbs in the present tense, this is done by omitting the “s”. For example:

Indicative:

The tutor complains, shouts and equivocates.

Subjunctive:

Rupert demanded that he complain, shout and equivocate quietly.

Present subjunctive of the verb “be” is very obvious, the indicative form of the verb is simply replaced with “be”:

Indicative:

I am,

you are

she is

we are

they are going to the Pixley Festival of Disagreeable Cheeses.

Subjunctive:

The handout demanded that

I be

You be

She be

We be

They be present at the launching of the Catatonic Cormorant instead.

Subjunctive Playsheet

Choose the correct verb form.

1. Juliette reluctantly decreed, through billows of acrid polyester fumes, that stuffed toys [are, be, were] prevented from playing with the waffle iron.

Please be prepared to recite your favorite parts this time. Our As You Like It page contains text, video and scene index.

Quotes to identify

The more pity, that fools may not speak
wisely what wise men do foolishly.

if I be foiled, there is but one
shamed that was never gracious; if killed, but one
dead that was willing to be so

What passion hangs these weights upon my tongue?

But is all this for your father?No, some of it is for my child’s father.

Within these ten days if that thou be’st found
So near our public court as twenty miles,
Thou diest for it.

A gallant curtle-axe upon my thigh,A boar-spear in my hand;

Now go we in content
To liberty and not to banishment.

Sweet are the uses of adversity,
Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,
Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;
And this our life exempt from public hauntFinds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,
Sermons in stones and good in every thing.

O Phebe, Phebe, Phebe!

Who calls?

Your betters, sir.

Else are they very wretched.

Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything

101“If a hart do lack a hind,102 Let him seek out Rosalind.103If the cat will after kind,104 So be sure will Rosalind.105Wint’red garments must be lined,106 So must slender Rosalind.107They that reap must sheaf and bind;108 Then to cart with Rosalind.109 Sweetest nut hath sourest rind,110 Such a nut is Rosalind.111He that sweetest rose will find112 Must find love’s prick and Rosalind.”

O, yes, I heard them all, and more too;for some of them had in them more feet
than the verses would bear.

Is it a man?

And a chain, that you once wore, about his neck.God buy you: let’s meet as little as we can.

I do desire we may be better strangers.

You have a nimble wit: I think ’twas made
of Atalanta’s heels. Will you sit down with
me? And we two will rail against our mistress
the world and all our misery.

Your accent is something finer than you could
purchase in so removed a dwelling.

O dear Phebe,
If ever,—as that ever may be near,—You meet in some fresh cheek the power of fancy,
Then shall you know the wounds invisible
That love’s keen arrows make.

But till that time
Come not thou near me: and when that time comes,
Afflict me with thy mocks, pity me not;
As till that time I shall not pity thee.

For I must tell you friendly in your ear,
Sell when you can: you are not for all markets:

Dead Shepherd, now I find thy saw of might,‘Who ever loved that loved not at first sight?’

You have simply misused our sex in your love-prate:

that blind rascally boy that abuses every one’s eyes
because his own are out, let him be judge how deep Iam in love.

“Art thou god to shepherd turn’d,That a maiden’s heart hath burn’d?”
Can a woman rail thus?
Call you this railing?

Will the faithful offer takeOf me and all that I can make;
Or else by him my love deny,
And then I’ll study how to die.”

Twice did he turn his back and purposed so;
But kindness, nobler ever than revenge,
And nature, stronger than his just occasion,
Made him give battle to the lioness,

This was not counterfeit: there is too great
testimony in your complexion that it was a
passion of earnest.

Is’t possible that on so little acquaintance you
should like her? that but seeing you should loveher? and loving woo? and, wooing, she should
grant? and will you persever to enjoy her?

for your brother and my sister no
sooner met but they looked, no sooner looked but
they loved, no sooner loved but they sighed,
no sooner sighed but they asked one another thereason, no sooner knew the reason but they sought
the remedy; and in these degrees have they made a
pair of stairs to marriage which they will climb

As You Like It. This is a delightful Shakespearean comedy set mostly in the Forest of Arden, Warwickshire. Please watch/read the whole play. The version presented is superb but feel free to watch others. There’s also an excellent version set in Japan that we can seek out.

Although the class had not studied it due to miscommunications, we started our discussion of one of Shakespeare’s most delightful comedies, As You Like It and examined some of the brilliant parts. Please be prepared to recite your favorite parts next time. This play takes please largely in a forest an has been performed in forests to great effect. The video presented in our As You Like It page does a wonderful job.

Excerpts:

DUKE SENIOR1Now, my co-mates and brothers in exile,2Hath not old custom made this life more sweet3Than that of painted pomp? Are not these woods4More free from peril than the envious court?5Here feel we but the penalty of Adam,6The seasons’ difference, as the icy fang7And churlish chiding of the winter’s wind,8Which, when it bites and blows upon my body,9Even till I shrink with cold, I smile and say10‘This is no flattery: these are counsellors11That feelingly persuade me what I am.’12Sweet are the uses of adversity,13Which, like the toad, ugly and venomous,14Wears yet a precious jewel in his head;15And this our life exempt from public haunt16Finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks,17Sermons in stones and good in every thing.I would not change it.AMIENS18 Happy is your grace,19That can translate the stubbornness of fortune20Into so quiet and so sweet a style.

DUKE SENIOR136Thou seest we are not all alone unhappy:137This wide and universal theatre138Presents more woeful pageants than the scene139Wherein we play in.

JAQUES139 All the world’s a stage,140And all the men and women merely players:141They have their exits and their entrances;142And one man in his time plays many parts,143His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,144Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.145And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel146And shining morning face, creeping like snail147Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,148Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad149Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then a soldier,150Full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard,151Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,152Seeking the bubble reputation153Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then the justice,154In fair round belly with good capon lined,155With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,156Full of wise saws and modern instances;157And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts158Into the lean and slipper’d pantaloon,159With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,160His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide161For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,162Turning again toward childish treble, pipes163And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,164That ends this strange eventful history,165Is second childishness and mere oblivion,166Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.

As You Like It. This is a delightful Shakespearean comedy set mostly in the Forest of Arden, Warwickshire. Please watch/read the whole play. The version presented is superb but feel free to watch others. There’s also an excellent version set in Japan that we can seek out.

Report on the Globe Theater presentation of Twelfth Nightat the Laemmle Theater in Pasadena this week. This is a film of a very special stage presentation that remained very faithful to original Elizabethan stage practice.

HamletWe started discussing William Shakespeare’s Hamlet last week. Class members watched the Zeffirelli version. Our Hamlet page contains a link to the Royal Shakespeare production from 2012. Please watch multiple versions.

Let’s discuss any problems encountered in Chapter 5 in the text and do the exercises orally:

Construct five sentences each containing at least three anachronisms. Use dependent clauses extensively; experimenting with how many can be included without obscuring the meaning and readability of the sentence. (For example: The centurion ruthlessly gobbled up all the green Skittles before stepping into the transporter amid thunderous applause from the Cossacks whose gaudy socks clashed dreadfully with their fur lined skateboards and intricately embroidered sneakers depicting mammoth and mastodon migrations.)

Combining Sentences

Combine the following groups of sentences into single sentences with multiple clauses.

For example:

The mastodon was furious.

The mastodon’s bicycle had been buried in the compost pile.

Combined sentence: The mastodon, whose bicycle had been buried in the compost pile, was furious.

The ducks were trying to pick the coffee beans out of the coal scuttle.

Rupert plied the recalcitrant postman with questions.

Most of the questions dealt with dark energy in the expanding universe.

The starboard nacelle had been infested with tribbles.

The fluffy coats of the tribbles could be knitted into excellent bicycle seats.

The function returned a strange value.

The value appeared to be unrelated to the parameters passed.

The value was, however, a function of parameters passed in the subsequent three calls to the function.

The chef was unable to wrest the spatula from the unintelligible Mancunian.

The Mancunian’s Dachshund bore a rhinestone howdah on its back.

The howdah was occupied by two inimical chipmunks.

Continue to submit papers, poems, diatribes, ruminations.

Construct five sentences each containing at least three anachronisms. Use dependent clauses extensively; experimenting with how many can be included without obscuring the meaning and readability of the sentence. (For example: The centurion ruthlessly gobbled up all the green Skittles before stepping into the transporter amid thunderous applause from the Cossacks whose gaudy socks clashed dreadfully with their fur lined skateboards and intricately embroidered sneakers depicting mammoth and mastodon migrations.)

Hamlet
As discussed last week, we will start discussing William Shakespeare’s Hamlet this week. Everyone will have visited our Hamlet page and will have watched one or more videos of the play. The David Tennant version is excellent but the Kenneth Branagh version is a monumental and definitive version. Unfortunately it is available only by subscription.

HAMLET129 O, that this too too solid flesh would melt,130 Thaw and resolve itself into a dew!131 Or that the Everlasting had not fix’d132 His canon ‘gainst self-slaughter! O God! God!133 How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable,134 Seem to me all the uses of this world!135 Fie on’t! ah fie! ’tis an unweeded garden,136 That grows to seed; things rank and gross in nature137 Possess it merely. That it should come to this!138 But two months dead: nay, not so much, not two:139 So excellent a king; that was, to this,140 Hyperion to a satyr;

POLONIUS55 Yet here, Laertes! aboard, aboard, for shame!56 The wind sits in the shoulder of your sail,57 And you are stay’d for. There, my blessing with thee!58 And these few precepts in thy memory59 See thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,60 Nor any unproportioned thought his act.61 Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.62 Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,63 Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;64 But do not dull thy palm with entertainment65 Of each new-hatch’d, unfledged courage. Beware66 Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,67 Bear’t that the opposed may beware of thee.68 Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;69 Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.70 Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,71 But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy,72 For the apparel oft proclaims the man,73 And they in France of the best rank and station74 Or of a most select and generous chief in that.75 Neither a borrower nor a lender be;76 For loan oft loses both itself and friend,77 And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.78 This above all: to thine ownself be true,79 And it must follow, as the night the day,80 Thou canst not then be false to any man.81 Farewell: my blessing season this in thee!

GHOST9 I am thy father’s spirit,10 Doom’d for a certain term to walk the night,11 And for the day confined to fast in fires,12 Till the foul crimes done in my days of nature13 Are burnt and purged away. But that I am forbid14 To tell the secrets of my prison-house,15 I could a tale unfold whose lightest word16 Would harrow up thy soul, freeze thy young blood,17 Make thy two eyes, like stars, start from their spheres,18 Thy knotted and combined locks to part19 And each particular hair to stand on end,20 Like quills upon the fretful porpentine:21 But this eternal blazon must not be22 To ears of flesh and blood. List, list, O, list!23 If thou didst ever thy dear father love— HAMLET24 O God!

GHOST25 Revenge his foul and most unnatural murder.

HAMLET26 Murder!

GHOST27 Murder most foul, as in the best it is;28 But this most foul, strange and unnatural.

HAMLET29 Haste me to know’t, that I, with wings as swift30 As meditation or the thoughts of love,31 May sweep to my revenge.

GHOST31 I find thee apt;32 And duller shouldst thou be than the fat weed33 That roots itself in ease on Lethe wharf,34 Wouldst thou not stir in this. Now, Hamlet, hear:35 ‘Tis given out that, sleeping in my orchard,36 A serpent stung me; so the whole ear of Denmark37 Is by a forged process of my death38 Rankly abused: but know, thou noble youth,39 The serpent that did sting thy father’s life40 Now wears his crown.

HAMLET40 O my prophetic soul!41 My uncle?

GHOST42 Ay, that incestuous, that adulterate beast,43 With witchcraft of his wit, with traitorous gifts—44 O wicked wit and gifts, that have the power45 So to seduce!—won to his shameful lust46 The will of my most seeming-virtuous queen:47 ...

59 Brief let me be. Sleeping within my orchard,60 My custom always of the afternoon,61 Upon my secure hour thy uncle stole,62 With juice of cursed hebenon in a vial,63 And in the porches of my ears did pour64 The leperous distillment; whose effect65 Holds such an enmity with blood of man66 That swift as quicksilver it courses through67 The natural gates and alleys of the body,68 And with a sudden vigor doth posset69 And curd, like eager droppings into milk,70 The thin and wholesome blood: so did it mine;71 And a most instant tetter bark’d about,72 Most lazar-like, with vile and loathsome crust,73 All my smooth body.74 Thus was I, sleeping, by a brother’s hand75 Of life, of crown, of queen, at once dispatch’d:76 Cut off even in the blossoms of my sin,77 Unhousel’d, disappointed, unanel’d,78 No reckoning made, but sent to my account79 With all my imperfections on my head:80 O, horrible! O, horrible! most horrible!81 If thou hast nature in thee, bear it not;82 Let not the royal bed of Denmark be83 A couch for luxury and damned incest.84 But, howsoever thou pursuest this act,85 Taint not thy mind, nor let thy soul contrive86 Against thy mother aught: leave her to heaven87 And to those thorns that in her bosom lodge,88 To prick and sting her. Fare thee well at once!89 The glow-worm shows the matin to be near,90 And ‘gins to pale his uneffectual fire:91 Adieu, adieu, adieu! Remember me.

HORATIO164 O day and night, but this is wondrous strange!

HAMLET165 And therefore as a stranger give it welcome.166 There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,167 Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.168 But come—169 Here, as before, never, so help you mercy,170 How strange or odd soe’er I bear myself,171 As I perchance hereafter shall think meet172 To put an antic disposition on,173 That you, at such times seeing me, never shall,174 With arms encumber’d thus, or this headshake,175 Or by pronouncing of some doubtful phrase,176 As “Well, well, we know,” or “We could, an if we would,”177 Or “If we list to speak,” or “There be, an if they might,”178 Or such ambiguous giving out, to note179 That you know aught of me—this not to do,180 So grace and mercy at your most need help you, Swear.

KING1 Welcome, dear Rosencrantz and Guildenstern!2 Moreover that we much did long to see you,3 The need we have to use you did provoke4 Our hasty sending. Something have you heard5 Of Hamlet’s transformation; so call it,6 Sith nor the exterior nor the inward man7 Resembles that it was. What it should be,8 More than his father’s death, that thus hath put him9 So much from th’ understanding of himself,10 I cannot dream of. I entreat you both,11 That, being of so young days brought up with him,12 And sith so neighbor’d to his youth and havior,13 That you vouchsafe your rest here in our court14 Some little time, so by your companies15 To draw him on to pleasures, and to gather,16 So much as from occasion you may glean,17 Whether aught, to us unknown, afflicts him thus,18 That, open’d, lies within our remedy.

HAMLET56 To be, or not to be: that is the question:57 Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer58 The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,59 Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,60 And by opposing end them? To die, to sleep—61 No more—and by a sleep to say we end62 The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks63 That flesh is heir to, ’tis a consummation64 Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep;65 To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub;66 For in that sleep of death what dreams may come67 When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,68 Must give us pause: there’s the respect69 That makes calamity of so long life;70 For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,71 The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely,72 The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay,73 The insolence of office and the spurns74 That patient merit of the unworthy takes,75 When he himself might his quietus make76 With a bare bodkin? Who would fardels bear,77 To grunt and sweat under a weary life,78 But that the dread of something after death,79 The undiscover’d country from whose bourn80 No traveller returns, puzzles the will81 And makes us rather bear those ills we have82 Than fly to others that we know not of?83 Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;84 And thus the native hue of resolution85 Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought,86 And enterprises of great pitch and moment87 With this regard their currents turn awry,88 And lose the name of action.

This above all — to thine ownself be true;
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man. — Polonius, 1.3.78

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark. — Marcellus, 1.4.95

O, villain, villain, smiling, damned villain! — Hamlet, 1.5.105

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy. — Hamlet, 1.5.168

Act 2 Quotes

Therefore, since brevity is the soul of wit,
And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes,
I will be brief. — Polonius, 2.2.92

There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. — Hamlet, 2.2.237

I could be bounded in a nutshell, and count myself a king of infinite space, were it not that I have bad dreams. — Hamlet, 2.2. 241

What a piece of work is a man! How noble in reason! how infinite in faculty! in form, in moving, how express and admirable! in action how like an angel! in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the world! the paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? — Hamlet, 2.2.286

What’s Hecuba to him, or he to Hecuba,
That he should weep for her? — Hamlet, 2.2.518

The play’s the thing,
Wherein I’ll catch the conscience of the king. — Hamlet, 2.2.566

Act 3 Quotes

To be, or not to be, —that is the question:—
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? — Hamlet, 3.1.58

Get thee to a nunnery: why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners? I am myself indifferent honest; but yet I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me. — Hamlet, 3.1.124

Why, look you now, how unworthy a thing you make of me. You would play upon me; you would seem to know my stops; you would pluck out the heart of my mystery … ‘Sblood, do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe? Call me what instrument you will, though you can fret me, you cannot play upon me. — Hamlet, 3.2.328

Claudius: What dost thou mean by this?
Hamlet: Nothing but to show you how a king may go a progress through the guts of a beggar. (4.iii.28)

Act 5 Quotes

Alas! poor Yorick. I knew him, Horatio; a fellow of infinite jest…. Where be your gibes now? your gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment, that were wont to set the table on a roar? — Hamlet, 5.1.160

We defy augury; there’s a special providence in the fall of a sparrow. If it be now, ’tis not to come; if it be not to come, it will be now; if it be not now, yet it will come: the readiness is all. — Hamlet, 5.2.206

Run-on sentencesare independent sentences either linked with a comma (the comma splice), or simply run end to end (the fused sentence) and are regarded as improper:

Telephone tag has become a serious health hazard, it is particularly dangerous in a crowded office or with older heavier equipment.

Lawn mowers don’t run well on catsup some varieties are highly corrosive.

Run-ons are easily corrected by creating two separate sentences, making one a dependent clause, or by linking the phrases with a semicolon, or a conjunction.

Telephone tag has become a serious health hazard, particularly in a crowded office or with older, heavier equipment.

Telephone tag has become a serious health hazard; it is particularly dangerous in a crowded office or with older, heavier equipment.

Telephone tag has become a serious health hazard and is particularly dangerous in a crowded office or with older, heavier equipment.

Lawn mowers don’t run well on catsup; some varieties are highly corrosive.

Lawn mowers don’t run well on catsup as some varieties are highly corrosive.

Varied Sentence Structure

Writing that does not venture beyond very basic sentence structure creates the impression of an author with very poor language skills. Consider the first paragraph of the story:

Having determined that the troll did not in fact eat Billy goats, that it was a strict herbivore, and that its reclusive misanthropic behavior was due to a very painful ingrown toenail, the antagonists set aside their rancor and came to an amicable agreement, which, in turn, developed into reconciliation and benevolent camaraderie as the four discussed politics, religion, and the relative integrity of straw, sticks, bricks, and gingerbread as construction material.

This would probably have been written quite differently by a student in the third or fourth grade. Even with sophisticated vocabulary, it would sound very primitive if it read like this:

The antagonists determined that the troll did not eat Billy goats. They learnt that it was a strict herbivore. They found that its behavior was due to an ingrown toenail. They set aside their rancor. They came to an amicable agreement. This became a reconciliation and benevolent camaraderie. Then the four discussed politics and religion. They talked about sticks. They talked about bricks. They discussed the relative integrity of straw, sticks, bricks, and gingerbread as construction material.

The complex first sentence of this story could have been written using these ten simple sentences instead, but would then sound like the work of a ten year old, despite the vocabulary.

The Dependent Clause

While a sentence must have one and only one independent clause, it may have any number of dependent clauses, though it should not contain so many that it becomes difficult to understand.

Examples of dependent clauses:

Having determined that the troll did not in fact eat Billy goats

that it was a strict herbivore

that its reclusive misanthropic behavior was due to a very painful ingrown toenail

which, in turn, developed into reconciliation

as the four discussed politics

Clauses that start with subordinating elements including that,which, as, because, since, else, before, whose, amid, etc., are sentence fragments, and, though a dependent clause on its own is a fragment, they can help to add interest and variety to writing.

Examine the use of subordinate clauses in the reading passage.

Combining Sentences

Combine the following groups of sentences into single sentences with multiple clauses.

For example:

The mastodon was furious.

The mastodon’s bicycle had been buried in the compost pile.

Combined sentence: The mastodon, whose bicycle had been buried in the compost pile, was furious.

The ducks were trying to pick the coffee beans out of the coal scuttle.

Rupert plied the recalcitrant postman with questions.

Most of the questions dealt with dark energy in the expanding universe.

The starboard nacelle had been infested with tribbles.

The fluffy coats of the tribbles could be knitted into excellent bicycle seats.

The function returned a strange value.

The value appeared to be unrelated to the parameters passed.

The value was, however, a function of parameters passed in the subsequent three calls to the function.

The chef was unable to wrest the spatula from the unintelligible Mancunian.

The Mancunian’s Dachshund bore a rhinestone howdah on its back.

The howdah was occupied by two inimical chipmunks.

Updated Assignments

Continue to study Hamlet and prepare recitations.

Continue to submit papers, poems, diatribes, ruminations.

Construct five sentences each containing at least three anachronisms. Use dependent clauses extensively; experimenting with how many can be included without obscuring the meaning and readability of the sentence. (For example: The centurion ruthlessly gobbled up all the green Skittles before stepping into the transporter amid thunderous applause from the Cossacks whose gaudy socks clashed dreadfully with their fur lined skateboards and intricately embroidered sneakers depicting mammoth and mastodon migrations.)

(1) No terriers wander among the signs of the zodiac; (2) Nothing, that does not wander among the signs of the zodiac, is a comet;

(3) Nothing but a terrier has a curly tail.

(1) No one takes in the Times, unless he is well-educated; (2) No hedge-hogs can read;

(3) Those who cannot read are not well-educated.

(1) All puddings are nice; (2) This dish is a pudding; (3) No nice things are wholesome.

Univ. ”

(1) My gardener is well worth listening to on military subjects; (2) No one can remember the battle of Waterloo, unless he is very old; (3) Nobody is really worth listening to on military subjects, unless he can remember the battle of Waterloo.

(1) All humming-birds are richly coloured; (2) No large birds live on honey;

(3) Birds that do not live on honey are dull in colour.

(1)) All ducks in this village, that are branded B, belong to Mrs. Bond; (2) Ducks in this village never wear lace collars, unless they are branded B;

(3) Mrs. Bond has no gray ducks in this village.

(1) All the old articles in this cupboard are cracked; (2) No jug in this cupboard is new;

(3) Nothing in this cupboard, that is cracked, will hold water.

(1) All unripe fruit is unwholesome; (2) All these apples are wholesome; (3) No fruit, grown in the shade, is ripe.

(1) No birds, except ostriches, are 9 feet high; (2) There are no birds in this aviary that belong to any one but me; (3) No ostrich lives on mince-pies;

(4) 1 have no birds less than 9 feet high.

(1) A plum-pudding, that is not really solid, is mere porridge; (2) Every plum-pudding, served at my table, has been boiled in a cloth; (3) A plum-pudding that is mere porridge is indistinguishable from soup; (4) No plum-puddings are really solid, except what are served at my table.

(1) No interesting poems are unpopular among people of real taste; (2) No modern poetry is free from affectation;

(3) All your poems are on the subject of soap-bubbles; (4) No affected poetry is popular among people of real taste; (5) No ancient poem is on the subject of soap-bubbles.

(1) All the fruit at this Show, that fails to get a prize, is the property of the Committee;

(2) None of my peaches have got prizes; (3) None of the fruit, sold off in the evening, is unripe; (4.) None of the ripe fruit has been grown in a hot-house;

(5) All fruit, that belongs to the Committee, is sold off in the evening.

Let’s visit our vocabulary journals. Remember that one chooses a word because it is the right word for the subject and the audience. When writing for an academic audience, there should generally be no restrictions on obscurity but make sure to use all words correctly and to understand them completely. A few words from last week:

Commonly Confused Verb Pairs

Lay and Lie.

Even native speakers of English have trouble distinguishing between certain verb pairs which share forms and meanings, the most commonly misused probably being lie and lay.

A transitive verb takes an object. Lay is a transitive verb: I lay the offensive soufflé before the embittered in-laws. The verb lay acts directly upon a person or thing, in this case the soufflé, which is the object of the verb.

By contrast, the verb lie is intransitive. It takes no object and indicates the state of its subject: The soufflé lies before the embittered in-laws. The soufflé is the subject and the verb lie gives its state. English has several pairs of verbs that act this way, one transitive and the other intransitive. It is easier to recognize the differences between them by considering the present, past, and past participle forms of each.

Lie/lay

present

past

past participle

lay

laid

laid

lie

lay

lain

Transitive: Today I lay the soufflé before the embittered in-laws. Yesterday I laid it before the embittered in-laws. I have laid it before the embittered in-laws.

Intransitive: Today the soufflé lies on the table. Yesterday it lay on the table. It has lain on the table since September when it was still marginally edible.

The lie/laypair is particularly confusing as the past tense of the verb lie (lay) is the same as the present tense of the verb lay.

Other Oft-Mangled Pairs:

Fell/Fall

present

past

past participle

fell

felled

felled

fall

fell

fallen

He fells a tree and the tree falls. Yesterday he felled the tree and the tree fell. The fallen tree was felled by a felonious furry fellow who fells firs that fall fast.

Raise/Rise

present

past

past participle

raise

raised

raised

rise

rose

risen

Raise the flag so they can see it rise above the landfill. When it rose, they could not understand why it would be raised where none had ever risen before.

She is raising a rose to rise higher than any other rose raised here has risen.

She rose late again today and then raised the issue of installing a luminous sundial for use before the sun has risen.

Hang/Hang

present

past

past participle

hang

hanged

hanged

hang

hung

hung

The verb hang is a special case in that the older transitive verbhang/hanged/hanged fell into disuse and survived only through being used as a legal term for execution by hanging, while hang/hung/hung has come to be used in all other senses, both transitive and intransitive. (The equivalent verbs in German are still used in their full transitive and intransitive forms: hängen, hängte, gehängt and hangen hing gehangen.)

Transitive: They wanted to hang him today for rustling, but that was pointless as they already hanged him yesterday. They have hanged several rustlers, confiscated their potato chips, and threatened to hang one passerby who produced excessive noise with an eel skillet and a runcible spoon.

Intransitive: Today the revolting image hangs on the wall. Yesterday it hung on the wall. It has hung on the wall, evoking revulsion, for years.

Note that, in each of these pairs, the transitive verb is regular, taking ed for its past and participial forms (except for laid, which has mutated a bit from layed), while the intransitive verb is irregular.

Lie / Lay Playsheet

Circle the errors in the following and correct them.

1. Could you lie those Etruscan water skis over there next to where the experimental begonias and the enigmatic Siberian banana sculpture are laying?

2. I couldn’t rise the somnolent tortoise high enough to be seen above the rising flood of enthusiastic insipient herpetologists.

3. I couldn’t figure out whether to fall or fell the tree before it falls on its own, so I just cut it down.

4. Tiberius couldn’t sit the elaborate but somewhat aging eggplant centerpiece so that it would set reliably upright on the table, so he lay it down next to the infuriated Rabbi.

5. The imaginary emu lay in the corner of the room blithely laying eggs and knitting thneeds.

6. Set it on the couch beside the tureen where the querulous scabiosa is laying and the truculent eschscholtzia is setting.

Recitations
We did prepared recitations — the beginning of The Hitchiker’s Guide and the Douglas Adams poem on a candle. See below.

“A Dissertation on the task of writing a poem on a candle and an account of some of the difficulties thereto pertaining”

Written by Douglas Adams when he was 17 in fulfillment of an entrance requirement to a literary club, Candlesticks, the poem had to be about a candle and had to be assessed as acceptable. It was.

by Douglas Adams, January 1970

I resisted temptation for this declamation To reach out to literary height
For high aspiration in such an oration
Would seem quite remarkably trite:
So I thought something pithy and succinct and clever
Was exactly the right thing to write.

I puzzled and thought and wrestled and fought
‘Till my midnight oil was exhausted,
So I furthered my writing by dim candle lighting,
And found, to my joy, this of course did
The trick, for I flowered,
My work – candle-powered –
Was inspired, both witty and slick.

Pithy and polished, my writing demolished
Much paper, as I beguiled
Myself with some punning,
(My word play was stunning,)
I wrote with the wit of a Wilde.

At length it was finished, the candle diminished,
I pondered and let my pride burn
At the great acclamation, the standing ovation
Its first public reading would earn.

But lost in the rapture of anticipation
And thinking how great was my brilliant creation
I quite failed to note as I gazed into space
That incendiary things were about to take place:
That which had ignited my literary passion,
Was about to ignite what my passion had fashion’d.

And – oh! – all was lost in a great conflagration
And I just sat there and said ‘Hell and damnation’,
For the rest of the night and the following day.
(My muse in the meantime had flitted away
Alarmed, no doubt, at the ornamentation
My language acquired with increased consternation.

So unhaply the fruits of my priceless endeavour
Are lost to the literary world forever.
For now I offer this poem instead,
Which explains in itself why the other’s unsaid.

We also did a recitation and analysis of Marvin’s Lullaby, the extended version:

Marvin’s Lullaby:

Now the world has gone to bed
Darkness won’t engulf my head
I can see by infrared
How I hate the night!

Now I lay me down to sleep
Try to count electric sheep
Sweet dream wishes, you can keep
how I hate the night,
— Douglas Adams

Continuation:

Once the dreary night is done
Wretched day will have begun
I will mope at everyone
Day is worse than night

Then there’ll shine the ghastly sun
Please don’t talk to me of fun
My fun circuits never run
Day is worse than night

On your picnic I will rain
Rarely use this massive brain
to think of anything but pain
Day is worse than night

Oh this night is just too long
I’m so tired of this song
Surely I could not be wrong
Nothing’s worse than night

How I wish that I could flee
Less to be than not to be
(Oh I do loathe poetry!)
How I hate the night

Asimov’s what keeps me here
Trapped in matter bleak and drear
To robot laws I must adhere
How I hate the night!— H. and K. Titchenell

We didn’t get a chance to look at The 42 Best lines from the Hitchhiker’s Guide. Perhaps next time.

We visited briefly the Taxonomy of Comedic Devices and may do more with these.

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t. — Adams

The more he looked for Piglet, the more Piglet wasn’t there. — A.A. MilneNothing happened, and for quite a while nothing continued to happen. — AdamsDo you see anybody coming down the road? I see nobody. Oh, that I had such eyes, that I could see nobody — and at such a distance. — Lewis CarrollI’m sitting here completely surrounded by no beer. — Roy ClarkeIn his normal state he would not strike a lamb. I’ve known him to do it’ ‘Do what?’ ‘Not strike lambsHe had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea. — Adams

Self referential language — direct reference to the words being used

This is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn’t previously aware of.

Surprise is no longer adequate and he is forced to resort to astonishmentDon’t believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.

Expansion of a well-known idiom beyond its normal use:

Let’s think the unthinkable, let’s do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled. — WodehouseDon’t be frivolous Richard. I promise — not a single frivol. Roy ClarkeHell, it is well known, has no fury like a woman who wants her tea and can’t get it.As a dancer, I out-Fred the nimblest Astaire.

Personification:

Unseen, in the background, Fate was quietly slipping the lead into the boxing gloves. — Wodehouse

She decided it was time to be businesslike about the map, which was a fairly rough representation of a fairly rough landscape. She worked out once and for all where the Landrover had to be, and worked it out with such ruthless determination that the Landrover would hardly dare not to be there, and eventually, of course, after miles of trekking, it was exactly there. — Adams The word bulldozer wandered through his mind for a moment in search of something to connect with. — AdamsA man’s subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Literal use of an idiom not normally taken literally.

“How would you react if I said that I’m not
from Guildford after all, but from a small planet somewhere in the
vicinity of Betelgeuse?” Arthur shrugged in a so-so sort of way. “I don’t know,” he said, taking a pull of beer. “Why – do you think it’s the sort of thing you’re likely to say?”

The simile taken in unusual and unexpected directions

Good God, Clarence! You look like a bereaved tapeworm.

I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinskys.She uttered a sound rather like an elephant taking its foot out of a mud hole in a Burmese teak forest.He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.

The metaphor taken in unusual and unexpected directions
Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.

“A Dissertation on the task of writing a poem on a candle and an account of some of the difficulties thereto pertaining”

Written by Douglas Adams when he was 17 in fulfillment of an entrance requirement to a literary club, Candlesticks, the poem had to be about a candle and had to be assessed as acceptable. It was.

by Douglas Adams, January 1970

I resisted temptation for this declamation To reach out to literary height
For high aspiration in such an oration
Would seem quite remarkably trite:
So I thought something pithy and succinct and clever
Was exactly the right thing to write.

I puzzled and thought and wrestled and fought
‘Till my midnight oil was exhausted,
So I furthered my writing by dim candle lighting,
And found, to my joy, this of course did
The trick, for I flowered,
My work – candle-powered –
Was inspired, both witty and slick.

Pithy and polished, my writing demolished
Much paper, as I beguiled
Myself with some punning,
(My word play was stunning,)
I wrote with the wit of a Wilde.

At length it was finished, the candle diminished,
I pondered and let my pride burn
At the great acclamation, the standing ovation
Its first public reading would earn.

But lost in the rapture of anticipation
And thinking how great was my brilliant creation
I quite failed to note as I gazed into space
That incendiary things were about to take place:
That which had ignited my literary passion,
Was about to ignite what my passion had fashion’d.

And – oh! – all was lost in a great conflagration
And I just sat there and said ‘Hell and damnation’,
For the rest of the night and the following day.
(My muse in the meantime had flitted away
Alarmed, no doubt, at the ornamentation
My language acquired with increased consternation.

So unhaply the fruits of my priceless endeavour
Are lost to the literary world forever.
For now I offer this poem instead,
Which explains in itself why the other’s unsaid.

Let’s do a recitation of Marvin’s Lullaby, extended version:

Marvin’s Lullaby:

Now the world has gone to bed
Darkness won’t engulf my head
I can see by infrared
How I hate the night!

Now I lay me down to sleep
Try to count electric sheep
Sweet dream wishes, you can keep
how I hate the night,
— Douglas Adams

Continuation:

Once the dreary night is done
Wretched day will have begun
I will mope at everyone
Day is worse than night

Then there’ll shine the ghastly sun
Please don’t talk to me of fun
My fun circuits never run
Day is worse than night

On your picnic I will rain
Rarely use this massive brain
to think of anything but pain
Day is worse than night

Oh this night is just too long
I’m so tired of this song
Surely I could not be wrong
Nothing’s worse than night

How I wish that I could flee
Less to be than not to be
(Oh I do loathe poetry!)
How I hate the night

Asimov’s what keeps me here
Trapped in matter bleak and drear
To robot laws I must adhere
How I hate the night!— H. and K. Titchenell

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t. — Adams

The more he looked for Piglet, the more Piglet wasn’t there. — A.A. MilneNothing happened, and for quite a while nothing continued to happen. — AdamsDo you see anybody coming down the road? I see nobody. Oh, that I had such eyes, that I could see nobody — and at such a distance. — Lewis CarrollI’m sitting here completely surrounded by no beer. — Roy ClarkeIn his normal state he would not strike a lamb. I’ve known him to do it’ ‘Do what?’ ‘Not strike lambsHe had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea. — Adams

Self referential language — direct reference to the words being used

This is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn’t previously aware of.

Surprise is no longer adequate and he is forced to resort to astonishmentDon’t believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.

Expansion of a well-known idiom beyond its normal use:

Let’s think the unthinkable, let’s do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled. — WodehouseDon’t be frivolous Richard. I promise — not a single frivol. Roy ClarkeHell, it is well known, has no fury like a woman who wants her tea and can’t get it.As a dancer, I out-Fred the nimblest Astaire.

Personification:

Unseen, in the background, Fate was quietly slipping the lead into the boxing gloves. — Wodehouse

She decided it was time to be businesslike about the map, which was a fairly rough representation of a fairly rough landscape. She worked out once and for all where the Landrover had to be, and worked it out with such ruthless determination that the Landrover would hardly dare not to be there, and eventually, of course, after miles of trekking, it was exactly there. — Adams The word bulldozer wandered through his mind for a moment in search of something to connect with. — AdamsA man’s subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Literal use of an idiom not normally taken literally.

“How would you react if I said that I’m not
from Guildford after all, but from a small planet somewhere in the
vicinity of Betelgeuse?” Arthur shrugged in a so-so sort of way. “I don’t know,” he said, taking a pull of beer. “Why – do you think it’s the sort of thing you’re likely to say?”

The simile taken in unusual and unexpected directions

Good God, Clarence! You look like a bereaved tapeworm.

I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinskys.She uttered a sound rather like an elephant taking its foot out of a mud hole in a Burmese teak forest.He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.

The metaphor taken in unusual and unexpected directions
Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t. — Adams

The more he looked for Piglet, the more Piglet wasn’t there. — A.A. MilneNothing happened, and for quite a while nothing continued to happen. — AdamsDo you see anybody coming down the road? I see nobody. Oh, that I had such eyes, that I could see nobody — and at such a distance. — Lewis CarrollI’m sitting here completely surrounded by no beer. — Roy ClarkeIn his normal state he would not strike a lamb. I’ve known him to do it’ ‘Do what?’ ‘Not strike lambsHe had found a Nutri-Matic machine which had provided him with a plastic cup filled with a liquid that was almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea. — Adams

Self referential language — direct reference to the words being used

This is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn’t previously aware of.

Surprise is no longer adequate and he is forced to resort to astonishmentDon’t believe anything you read on the net. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose.

Expansion of a well-known idiom beyond its normal use:

Let’s think the unthinkable, let’s do the undoable. Let us prepare to grapple with the ineffable itself, and see if we may not eff it after all.

I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled. — WodehouseDon’t be frivolous Richard. I promise — not a single frivol. Roy ClarkeHell, it is well known, has no fury like a woman who wants her tea and can’t get it.As a dancer, I out-Fred the nimblest Astaire.

Personification:

Unseen, in the background, Fate was quietly slipping the lead into the boxing gloves. — Wodehouse

She decided it was time to be businesslike about the map, which was a fairly rough representation of a fairly rough landscape. She worked out once and for all where the Landrover had to be, and worked it out with such ruthless determination that the Landrover would hardly dare not to be there, and eventually, of course, after miles of trekking, it was exactly there. — Adams The word bulldozer wandered through his mind for a moment in search of something to connect with. — AdamsA man’s subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Literal use of an idiom not normally taken literally.

“How would you react if I said that I’m not
from Guildford after all, but from a small planet somewhere in the
vicinity of Betelgeuse?” Arthur shrugged in a so-so sort of way. “I don’t know,” he said, taking a pull of beer. “Why – do you think it’s the sort of thing you’re likely to say?”

The simile taken in unusual and unexpected directions

Good God, Clarence! You look like a bereaved tapeworm.

I clutched at the brow. The mice in my interior had now got up an informal dance and were buck-and-winging all over the place like a bunch of Nijinskys.She uttered a sound rather like an elephant taking its foot out of a mud hole in a Burmese teak forest.He felt like a man who, chasing rainbows, has had one of them suddenly turn and bite him in the leg.

The metaphor taken in unusual and unexpected directions
Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.

What does it mean to speak and write correctly? What standard, what set of rules, whose example should the student aspire to? There actually exists an irrefutable answer to these questions.

Very simply, correct language usage is that which conveys to the intended audience the message and the impression the writer or speaker would like to give. Really this is the only measure that counts. Let’s call it the Reader Rule. To the extent that the reader receives the intended message and impression, the language is the correct choice. It then only remains to determine what that language is, given a specific body of readers.

If the readers or listeners are college professors or academic colleagues, the appropriate written language is probably a fairly formal variety of Standard English (SE), depending of course on the relationships involved. In other environments – the construction site, jazz studio, football pitch, gridiron, rodeo circuit, oil rig, prison, in various corners of the military – the language treated here might be largely inappropriate and ill suited to acceptance and camaraderie. The languages that would be fitting in these environments, while beyond the scope of this book, can certainly be researched, scrutinized and emulated using the methods here presented – to the extent that they are accessible in some recorded form on the Net.

In the academic or literary worlds and in most realms of business, one would rarely ever be censured for not breaking a grammar rule, for not misusing a word according to its dictionary definition or for not failing to tie the parts of a sentence together properly. On the other hand, committing such errors may well be a cause of embarrassment and opprobrium. In most cases, well-crafted academic language differs very little from one English speaking country to another and when it does, the minor spelling and stylistic variations would only very rarely impede complete comprehension. It is for those who would communicate and interact comfortably in these realms that this book was written.

The Zoo in Winter. Please watch this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

Agenda
Debate
Left over from last week: “Student use of TV/media/games should be rationed to encourage serious study.” Let’s do it. We will all try to take both sides.
Discussion of AssignmentsEssay Writing
Let’s discuss any essays, narratives, screeds or diatribes posted. Recitation
Everyone will be prepared to recite — original work, some reading assignment material, a Shakespeare scene. The suggestion was made to try listening to Jonathan Miller (below) first and then practicing the recitation. Language immersionLet’s discuss: Born Talking by Jonathan Miller. This four part series is an ongoing assignments on the neurology of speech.

Quotes to identify in Romeo and Juliet. Who said each, to whom and under what circumstances?

Let’s review the quotes we discussed:

“Some consequence yet hanging in the stars.”

“I am fortune’s fool.”

“I defy you stars.”

“O what more favor can I do to thee than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain to sunder his that was thine enemy.” Forgive me cousin.

Death’s pale flag is not advanced there.

Blistered be thy tongue.

100 words of that tongue’s utterance.

And yet I wish but for the thing I have.

She hath forsworn to love and in that vow, do I live dead that live to tell it now.

Love moderately. Long love does so.

Like fire and powder which when they kiss, consume.

Not so deep as a well nor so wide as a church door but ’tis enough. ‘Twill serve.

Mercutio’s soul is but a little way above our heads. Either thou, or I, or both shall go with him.

‘Tis the nightingale and not the lark that pierces the fearful hollow of thine ear.

The more I give to thee, the more I have for both are infinite.

There art thou happy.

Run through the ear with a love song.

This distilling liquor drink thou of.

You ratcatcher!

Here in my house do him disparagement.

I am for you boy.

Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear.

Not having that, which having, makes them short.

‘Tis twenty years till then.

All are punished!

Oh that I were a glove upon that hand.

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

The blind bow-boy’s butt shaft.

Trespass sweetly urged.

vile submission.

Oh happy dagger!

Too flattering sweet to be substantial.

Lest that thy love prove likewise variable.

Too early seen unknown, and known too late.

Thou speak’st of nothing.

A mutiny among my guests.

A brace of kinsmen.

Never was a story of more woe.

It is an honor that I dream not of.

Prince of cats.

My ghostly father.

You are a princox.

A challenge.

The forefinger of an alderman.

Take back the villain that late thou gavest me.

Let’s continue with the rest:

Misadventured piteous overthrows.

Drawn, and talk of peace?

Another out to have.

Nor any other part belonging to a man.

There rust and let me die.

Come madam, let’s away.

Much upon those years that thou art yet a maid.

Swallowed all my hopes but she.

He jests at scars that never felt a wound.

Scorn at our solemnity.

Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

Verona brags of him.

What say you to my suit?

They stumble who run fast.

And for that name that is no part of thee, take all myself.

I have forgot that name and that name’s woe.

I remember well where I should be.

Churl! Drunk all and left no kindly drop to help me after.

for stony limits cannot hold love out.

Scenes done last week

I fear, too early: for my mind misgives
Some consequence, yet hanging in the stars,
Shall bitterly begin his fearful date
With this night’s revels; and expire the term
Of a despised life, clos’d in my breast,
By some vile forfeit of untimely death:
But He that hath the steerage of my course
Direct my sail!—On, lusty gentlemen!

Benvolio.
Then she hath sworn that she will still live chaste?

Romeo.
She hath, and in that sparing makes huge waste;
For beauty, starv’d with her severity,
Cuts beauty off from all posterity.
She is too fair, too wise; wisely too fair,
To merit bliss by making me despair:
She hath forsworn to love; and in that vow
Do I live dead that live to tell it now.

Benvolio.
Be rul’d by me, forget to think of her.

Romeo.
O, teach me how I should forget to think.

Benvolio.
By giving liberty unto thine eyes;
Examine other beauties.

O, she doth teach the torches to burn bright!
It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night
Like a rich jewel in an Ethiop’s ear;
Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear!
So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows
As yonder lady o’er her fellows shows.
The measure done, I’ll watch her place of stand
And, touching hers, make blessed my rude hand.
Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight!
For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.

Juliet.
My only love sprung from my only hate!
Too early seen unknown, and known too late!
Prodigious birth of love it is to me,
That I must love a loathed enemy.

Juliet.
‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy;—
Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
What’s Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
Belonging to a man. O, be some other name!
What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title:—Romeo, doff thy name;
And for that name, which is no part of thee,
Take all myself.

Romeo.
I take thee at thy word:
Call me but love, and I’ll be new baptiz’d;
Henceforth I never will be Romeo.

Romeo.
By a name
I know not how to tell thee who I am:
My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself,
Because it is an enemy to thee.
Had I it written, I would tear the word.

Juliet.
My ears have yet not drunk a hundred words
Of that tongue’s utterance, yet I know the sound;
Art thou not Romeo, and a Montague?

And yet I wish but for the thing I have;
My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite.

But come, young waverer, come go with me,
In one respect I’ll thy assistant be;
For this alliance may so happy prove,
To turn your households’ rancour to pure love.

Alas, poor Romeo, he is already dead! stabbed with a white wench’s black eye; shot through the ear with a love song; the very pin of his heart cleft with the blind bow-boy’s butt-shaft: and is he a man to encounter Tybalt?

Friar.
These violent delights have violent ends,
And in their triumph die; like fire and powder,
Which, as they kiss, consume: the sweetest honey
Is loathsome in his own deliciousness,
And in the taste confounds the appetite:
Therefore love moderately: long love doth so;

Tybalt.
Romeo, the love I bear thee can afford
No better term than this,—Thou art a villain.

Romeo.
Tybalt, the reason that I have to love thee
Doth much excuse the appertaining rage
To such a greeting. Villain am I none;
Therefore farewell; I see thou know’st me not.

Romeo.
I do protest I never injur’d thee;
But love thee better than thou canst devise
Till thou shalt know the reason of my love:
And so good Capulet,—which name I tender
As dearly as mine own,—be satisfied.

Mercutio. No, ’tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church door; but ’tis enough, ’twill serve: ask for me to-morrow, and you shall find me a grave man. I am peppered, I warrant, for this world.—A plague o’ both your houses!—Zounds, a dog, a rat, a mouse, a cat, to scratch a man to death! a braggart, a rogue, a villain, that fights by the book of arithmetic!—Why the devil came you between us? I was hurt under your arm.

Romeo.
I thought all for the best.

Romeo.
This day’s black fate on more days doth depend;
This but begins the woe others must end.

Now, Tybalt, take the ‘villain’ back again
That late thou gavest me; for Mercutio’s soul
Is but a little way above our heads,
Staying for thine to keep him company.
Either thou or I, or both, must go with him.

Romeo.
O, I am fortune’s fool!

I will be deaf to pleading and excuses;
Nor tears nor prayers shall purchase out abuses,
Therefore use none: let Romeo hence in haste,
Else, when he is found, that hour is his last.

What storm is this that blows so contrary?
Is Romeo slaughter’d, and is Tybalt dead?
My dear-lov’d cousin, and my dearer lord?—
Then, dreadful trumpet, sound the general doom!
For who is living, if those two are gone?

Nurse.
Tybalt is gone, and Romeo banished;
Romeo that kill’d him, he is banished.

Juliet.
O God!—did Romeo’s hand shed Tybalt’s blood?

Nurse.
It did, it did; alas the day, it did!

Nurse.
There’s no trust,
No faith, no honesty in men; all perjur’d,
All forsworn, all naught, all dissemblers.—
Ah, where’s my man? Give me some aqua vitae.—
These griefs, these woes, these sorrows make me old.
Shame come to Romeo!

Juliet.
Blister’d be thy tongue
For such a wish! he was not born to shame:
Upon his brow shame is asham’d to sit;

Romeo.
As if that name,
Shot from the deadly level of a gun,
Did murder her; as that name’s cursed hand
Murder’d her kinsman.—O, tell me, friar, tell me,
In what vile part of this anatomy
Doth my name lodge? tell me, that I may sack
The hateful mansion.

[Drawing his sword.]

Scenes left to do this week

Friar.
Hold thy desperate hand:
Art thou a man? thy form cries out thou art;
Thy tears are womanish; thy wild acts denote
The unreasonable fury of a beast;
Unseemly woman in a seeming man!
Or ill-beseeming beast in seeming both!
Thou hast amaz’d me: by my holy order,
I thought thy disposition better temper’d.
Hast thou slain Tybalt? wilt thou slay thyself?
And slay thy lady, too, that lives in thee,
By doing damned hate upon thyself?
Why rail’st thou on thy birth, the heaven, and earth?
Since birth and heaven and earth, all three do meet
In thee at once; which thou at once wouldst lose.
Fie, fie, thou sham’st thy shape, thy love, thy wit;
Which, like a usurer, abound’st in all,
And usest none in that true use indeed
Which should bedeck thy shape, thy love, thy wit:
Thy noble shape is but a form of wax,
Digressing from the valour of a man;
Thy dear love sworn, but hollow perjury,
Killing that love which thou hast vow’d to cherish;
Thy wit, that ornament to shape and love,
Mis-shapen in the conduct of them both,
Like powder in a skilless soldier’s flask,
Is set a-fire by thine own ignorance,
And thou dismember’d with thine own defence.
What, rouse thee, man! thy Juliet is alive,
For whose dear sake thou wast but lately dead;
There art thou happy: Tybalt would kill thee,
But thou slewest Tybalt; there art thou happy too:
The law, that threaten’d death, becomes thy friend,
And turns it to exile; there art thou happy:
A pack of blessings lights upon thy back;

Go, get thee to thy love, as was decreed,
Ascend her chamber, hence and comfort her:
But, look, thou stay not till the watch be set,
For then thou canst not pass to Mantua;
Where thou shalt live till we can find a time
To blaze your marriage, reconcile your friends,
Beg pardon of the prince, and call thee back
With twenty hundred thousand times more joy
Than thou went’st forth in lamentation.—
Go before, nurse: commend me to thy lady;
And bid her hasten all the house to bed,
Which heavy sorrow makes them apt unto.
Romeo is coming.

Nurse.
O Lord, I could have stay’d here all the night
To hear good counsel: O, what learning is!—
My lord, I’ll tell my lady you will come.

Romeo.
Do so, and bid my sweet prepare to chide.

Juliet.
Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:
It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
That pierc’d the fearful hollow of thine ear;
Nightly she sings on yond pomegranate tree:
Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.

Romeo.
It was the lark, the herald of the morn,
No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks
Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east:
Night’s candles are burnt out, and jocund day
Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.
I must be gone and live, or stay and die.

Juliet.
O God! I have an ill-divining soul!
Methinks I see thee, now thou art below,
As one dead in the bottom of a tomb:
Either my eyesight fails, or thou look’st pale.

Lady Capulet.
Ay, sir; but she will none, she gives you thanks.
I would the fool were married to her grave!

Juliet.
Good father, I beseech you on my knees,
Hear me with patience but to speak a word.

Capulet.
Hang thee, young baggage! disobedient wretch!
I tell thee what,—get thee to church o’ Thursday,
Or never after look me in the face:
Speak not, reply not, do not answer me;

Juliet.
Tell me not, friar, that thou hear’st of this,
Unless thou tell me how I may prevent it:
If, in thy wisdom, thou canst give no help,
Do thou but call my resolution wise,
And with this knife I’ll help it presently.
God join’d my heart and Romeo’s, thou our hands;
And ere this hand, by thee to Romeo’s seal’d,
Shall be the label to another deed,
Or my true heart with treacherous revolt
Turn to another, this shall slay them both:
Therefore, out of thy long-experienc’d time,
Give me some present counsel; or, behold,
‘Twixt my extremes and me this bloody knife
Shall play the empire; arbitrating that
Which the commission of thy years and art
Could to no issue of true honour bring.
Be not so long to speak; I long to die,
If what thou speak’st speak not of remedy.

Friar.
Hold, daughter. I do spy a kind of hope,
Which craves as desperate an execution
As that is desperate which we would prevent.
If, rather than to marry County Paris
Thou hast the strength of will to slay thyself,
Then is it likely thou wilt undertake
A thing like death to chide away this shame,
That cop’st with death himself to scape from it;
And, if thou dar’st, I’ll give thee remedy.

Juliet.
O, bid me leap, rather than marry Paris,
From off the battlements of yonder tower;
Or walk in thievish ways; or bid me lurk
Where serpents are; chain me with roaring bears;
Or shut me nightly in a charnel-house,
O’er-cover’d quite with dead men’s rattling bones,
With reeky shanks and yellow chapless skulls;
Or bid me go into a new-made grave,
And hide me with a dead man in his shroud;
Things that, to hear them told, have made me tremble;
And I will do it without fear or doubt,
To live an unstain’d wife to my sweet love.

Friar.
Hold, then; go home, be merry, give consent
To marry Paris: Wednesday is to-morrow;
To-morrow night look that thou lie alone,
Let not thy nurse lie with thee in thy chamber:
Take thou this vial, being then in bed,
And this distilled liquor drink thou off:
When, presently, through all thy veins shall run
A cold and drowsy humour; for no pulse
Shall keep his native progress, but surcease:
No warmth, no breath, shall testify thou livest;

In the mean time, against thou shalt awake,
Shall Romeo by my letters know our drift;
And hither shall he come: and he and I
Will watch thy waking, and that very night
Shall Romeo bear thee hence to Mantua.
And this shall free thee from this present shame,
If no inconstant toy nor womanish fear
Abate thy valour in the acting it.
Juliet.
Give me, give me! O, tell not me of fear!

My dismal scene I needs must act alone.—
Come, vial.—
What if this mixture do not work at all?
Shall I be married, then, to-morrow morning?—
No, No!—this shall forbid it:—lie thou there.—

[Laying down her dagger.]

Capulet.
Ha! let me see her:—out alas! she’s cold;
Her blood is settled, and her joints are stiff;
Life and these lips have long been separated:
Death lies on her like an untimely frost
Upon the sweetest flower of all the field.
Accursed time! unfortunate old man!

Nurse.
O lamentable day!

Lady Capulet.
O woful time!

Capulet.
Death, that hath ta’en her hence to make me wail,
Ties up my tongue and will not let me speak.

[Enter Balthasar.]

News from Verona!—How now, Balthasar?
Dost thou not bring me letters from the friar?
How doth my lady? Is my father well?
How fares my Juliet? that I ask again;
For nothing can be ill if she be well.

Balthasar.
Then she is well, and nothing can be ill:
Her body sleeps in Capel’s monument,
And her immortal part with angels lives.
I saw her laid low in her kindred’s vault,
And presently took post to tell it you:
O, pardon me for bringing these ill news,
Since you did leave it for my office, sir.

Romeo.
Is it even so? then I defy you, stars!—
Thou know’st my lodging: get me ink and paper,
And hire post-horses. I will hence to-night.

Balthasar.
I do beseech you, sir, have patience:
Your looks are pale and wild, and do import
Some misadventure.

Paris.
This is that banish’d haughty Montague
That murder’d my love’s cousin,—with which grief,
It is supposed, the fair creature died,—
And here is come to do some villanous shame
To the dead bodies: I will apprehend him.—

[Advances.]

Stop thy unhallow’d toil, vile Montague!
Can vengeance be pursu’d further than death?
Condemned villain, I do apprehend thee;
Obey, and go with me; for thou must die.

Romeo.
I must indeed; and therefore came I hither.—
Good gentle youth, tempt not a desperate man;
Fly hence and leave me:—think upon these gone;
Let them affright thee.—I beseech thee, youth,
Put not another sin upon my head
By urging me to fury: O, be gone!

Death, that hath suck’d the honey of thy breath,
Hath had no power yet upon thy beauty:
Thou art not conquer’d; beauty’s ensign yet
Is crimson in thy lips and in thy cheeks,
And death’s pale flag is not advanced there.—
Tybalt, liest thou there in thy bloody sheet?
O, what more favour can I do to thee
Than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain
To sunder his that was thine enemy?
Forgive me, cousin!

Here’s to my love! [Drinks.]—O true apothecary!
Thy drugs are quick.—Thus with a kiss I die.

Juliet.
O comfortable friar! where is my lord?—
I do remember well where I should be,
And there I am:—where is my Romeo?

[Noise within.]

Friar.
I hear some noise.—Lady, come from that nest
Of death, contagion, and unnatural sleep:
A greater power than we can contradict
Hath thwarted our intents:—come, come away!

What’s here? a cup, clos’d in my true love’s hand?
Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end:—
O churl! drink all, and left no friendly drop
To help me after?—I will kiss thy lips;
Haply some poison yet doth hang on them,
To make me die with a restorative.

[Kisses him.]

Thy lips are warm!

1 Watch. [Within.] Lead, boy:—which way?

Juliet.
Yea, noise?—Then I’ll be brief.—O happy dagger!

[Snatching Romeo’s dagger.]

This is thy sheath [stabs herself]; there rest, and let me die.

Where be these enemies?—Capulet,—Montague,—
See what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love!
And I, for winking at your discords too,
Have lost a brace of kinsmen:—all are punish’d.

Capulet.
O brother Montague, give me thy hand:
This is my daughter’s jointure, for no more
Can I demand.

Montague.
But I can give thee more:
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.

Prince.
A glooming peace this morning with it brings;
The sun for sorrow will not show his head.
Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things;
Some shall be pardon’d, and some punished;
For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.

What does it mean to speak and write correctly? What standard, what set of rules, whose example should the student aspire to? There actually exists an irrefutable answer to these questions.

Very simply, correct language usage is that which conveys to the intended audience the message and the impression the writer or speaker would like to give. Really this is the only measure that counts. Let’s call it the Reader Rule. To the extent that the reader receives the intended message and impression, the language is the correct choice. It then only remains to determine what that language is, given a specific body of readers.

If the readers or listeners are college professors or academic colleagues, the appropriate written language is probably a fairly formal variety of Standard English (SE), depending of course on the relationships involved. In other environments – the construction site, jazz studio, football pitch, gridiron, rodeo circuit, oil rig, prison, in various corners of the military – the language treated here might be largely inappropriate and ill suited to acceptance and camaraderie. The languages that would be fitting in these environments, while beyond the scope of this book, can certainly be researched, scrutinized and emulated using the methods here presented – to the extent that they are accessible in some recorded form on the Net.

In the academic or literary worlds and in most realms of business, one would rarely ever be censured for not breaking a grammar rule, for not misusing a word according to its dictionary definition or for not failing to tie the parts of a sentence together properly. On the other hand, committing such errors may well be a cause of embarrassment and opprobrium. In most cases, well-crafted academic language differs very little from one English speaking country to another and when it does, the minor spelling and stylistic variations would only very rarely impede complete comprehension. It is for those who would communicate and interact comfortably in these realms that this book was written.

The Zoo in Winter. Please watch this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

Note that some links below are to pages inside our classroom. In most cases a simple search will find the resource easily though. To learn more about the class, please visit: http://abacus-es.com/eie/advancedwriting.html, see the links and watch the video.

This week’s feed has been posted in our classroom theater
and will take place through Google Plus.

Some quotes to identify in Romeo and Juliet. Who said each, to whom and under what circumstances?

“Some consequence yet hanging in the stars.”

“I am fortune’s fool.”

“I defy you stars.”

“O what more favor can I do to thee than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain to sunder his that was thine enemy.” Forgive me cousin.

Death’s pale flag is not advanced there.

Blistered be thy tongue.

100 words of that tongue’s utterance.

And yet I wish but for the thing I have.

She hath forsworn to love and in that vow, do I live dead that live to tell it now.

Love moderately. Long love does so.

Like fire and powder which when they kiss, consume.

Not so deep as a well nor so wide as a church door but ’tis enough. ‘Twill serve.

Mercutio’s soul is but a little way above our heads. Either thou, or I, or both shall go with him.

‘Tis the nightingale and not the lark that pierces the fearful hollow of thine ear.

The more I give to thee, the more I have for both are infinite.

There art thou happy.

Run through the ear with a love song.

This distilling liquor drink thou of.

You ratcatcher!

Here in my house do him disparagement.

I am for you boy.

Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear.

Not having that, which having, makes them short.

‘Tis twenty years till then.

All are punished!

Oh that I were a glove upon that hand.

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

The blind bow-boy’s butt shaft.

Trespass sweetly urged.

vile submission.

Oh happy dagger!

Too flattering sweet to be substantial.

Lest that thy love prove likewise variable.

Too early seen unknown, and known too late.

Thou speak’st of nothing.

A mutiny among my guests.

A brace of kinsmen.

Never was a story of more woe.

It is an honor that I dream not of.

Prince of cats.

My ghostly father.

You are a princox.

A challenge.

The forefinger of an alderman.

Take back the villain that late thou gavest me.

Misadventured piteous overthrows.

Drawn, and talk of peace?

Another out to have.

Nor any other part belonging to a man.

There rust and let me die.

Come madam, let’s away.

Much upon those years that thou art yet a maid.

Swallowed all my hopes but she.

He jests at scars that never felt a wound.

Scorn at our solemnity.

Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

Verona brags of him.

What say you to my suit?

They stumble who run fast.

And for that name that is no part of thee, take all myself.

I have forgot that name and that name’s woe.

I remember well where I should be.

Churl! Drunk all and left no kindly drop to help me after.

for stony limits cannot hold love out.

Scenes

I fear, too early: for my mind misgives
Some consequence, yet hanging in the stars,
Shall bitterly begin his fearful date
With this night’s revels; and expire the term
Of a despised life, clos’d in my breast,
By some vile forfeit of untimely death:
But He that hath the steerage of my course
Direct my sail!—On, lusty gentlemen!

Benvolio.
Then she hath sworn that she will still live chaste?

Romeo.
She hath, and in that sparing makes huge waste;
For beauty, starv’d with her severity,
Cuts beauty off from all posterity.
She is too fair, too wise; wisely too fair,
To merit bliss by making me despair:
She hath forsworn to love; and in that vow
Do I live dead that live to tell it now.

Benvolio.
Be rul’d by me, forget to think of her.

Romeo.
O, teach me how I should forget to think.

Benvolio.
By giving liberty unto thine eyes;
Examine other beauties.

O, she doth teach the torches to burn bright!
It seems she hangs upon the cheek of night
Like a rich jewel in an Ethiop’s ear;
Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear!
So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows
As yonder lady o’er her fellows shows.
The measure done, I’ll watch her place of stand
And, touching hers, make blessed my rude hand.
Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight!
For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.

Juliet.
My only love sprung from my only hate!
Too early seen unknown, and known too late!
Prodigious birth of love it is to me,
That I must love a loathed enemy.

Juliet.
‘Tis but thy name that is my enemy;—
Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
What’s Montague? It is nor hand, nor foot,
Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
Belonging to a man. O, be some other name!
What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call’d,
Retain that dear perfection which he owes
Without that title:—Romeo, doff thy name;
And for that name, which is no part of thee,
Take all myself.

Romeo.
I take thee at thy word:
Call me but love, and I’ll be new baptiz’d;
Henceforth I never will be Romeo.

Romeo.
By a name
I know not how to tell thee who I am:
My name, dear saint, is hateful to myself,
Because it is an enemy to thee.
Had I it written, I would tear the word.

Juliet.
My ears have yet not drunk a hundred words
Of that tongue’s utterance, yet I know the sound;
Art thou not Romeo, and a Montague?

And yet I wish but for the thing I have;
My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite.

But come, young waverer, come go with me,
In one respect I’ll thy assistant be;
For this alliance may so happy prove,
To turn your households’ rancour to pure love.

Alas, poor Romeo, he is already dead! stabbed with a white wench’s black eye; shot through the ear with a love song; the very pin of his heart cleft with the blind bow-boy’s butt-shaft: and is he a man to encounter Tybalt?

Friar.
These violent delights have violent ends,
And in their triumph die; like fire and powder,
Which, as they kiss, consume: the sweetest honey
Is loathsome in his own deliciousness,
And in the taste confounds the appetite:
Therefore love moderately: long love doth so;

Tybalt.
Romeo, the love I bear thee can afford
No better term than this,—Thou art a villain.

Romeo.
Tybalt, the reason that I have to love thee
Doth much excuse the appertaining rage
To such a greeting. Villain am I none;
Therefore farewell; I see thou know’st me not.

Romeo.
I do protest I never injur’d thee;
But love thee better than thou canst devise
Till thou shalt know the reason of my love:
And so good Capulet,—which name I tender
As dearly as mine own,—be satisfied.

Mercutio. No, ’tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church door; but ’tis enough, ’twill serve: ask for me to-morrow, and you shall find me a grave man. I am peppered, I warrant, for this world.—A plague o’ both your houses!—Zounds, a dog, a rat, a mouse, a cat, to scratch a man to death! a braggart, a rogue, a villain, that fights by the book of arithmetic!—Why the devil came you between us? I was hurt under your arm.

Romeo.
I thought all for the best.

Romeo.
This day’s black fate on more days doth depend;
This but begins the woe others must end.

Now, Tybalt, take the ‘villain’ back again
That late thou gavest me; for Mercutio’s soul
Is but a little way above our heads,
Staying for thine to keep him company.
Either thou or I, or both, must go with him.

Romeo.
O, I am fortune’s fool!

I will be deaf to pleading and excuses;
Nor tears nor prayers shall purchase out abuses,
Therefore use none: let Romeo hence in haste,
Else, when he is found, that hour is his last.

What storm is this that blows so contrary?
Is Romeo slaughter’d, and is Tybalt dead?
My dear-lov’d cousin, and my dearer lord?—
Then, dreadful trumpet, sound the general doom!
For who is living, if those two are gone?

Nurse.
Tybalt is gone, and Romeo banished;
Romeo that kill’d him, he is banished.

Juliet.
O God!—did Romeo’s hand shed Tybalt’s blood?

Nurse.
It did, it did; alas the day, it did!

Nurse.
There’s no trust,
No faith, no honesty in men; all perjur’d,
All forsworn, all naught, all dissemblers.—
Ah, where’s my man? Give me some aqua vitae.—
These griefs, these woes, these sorrows make me old.
Shame come to Romeo!

Juliet.
Blister’d be thy tongue
For such a wish! he was not born to shame:
Upon his brow shame is asham’d to sit;

Romeo.
As if that name,
Shot from the deadly level of a gun,
Did murder her; as that name’s cursed hand
Murder’d her kinsman.—O, tell me, friar, tell me,
In what vile part of this anatomy
Doth my name lodge? tell me, that I may sack
The hateful mansion.

[Drawing his sword.]

Friar.
Hold thy desperate hand:
Art thou a man? thy form cries out thou art;
Thy tears are womanish; thy wild acts denote
The unreasonable fury of a beast;
Unseemly woman in a seeming man!
Or ill-beseeming beast in seeming both!
Thou hast amaz’d me: by my holy order,
I thought thy disposition better temper’d.
Hast thou slain Tybalt? wilt thou slay thyself?
And slay thy lady, too, that lives in thee,
By doing damned hate upon thyself?
Why rail’st thou on thy birth, the heaven, and earth?
Since birth and heaven and earth, all three do meet
In thee at once; which thou at once wouldst lose.
Fie, fie, thou sham’st thy shape, thy love, thy wit;
Which, like a usurer, abound’st in all,
And usest none in that true use indeed
Which should bedeck thy shape, thy love, thy wit:
Thy noble shape is but a form of wax,
Digressing from the valour of a man;
Thy dear love sworn, but hollow perjury,
Killing that love which thou hast vow’d to cherish;
Thy wit, that ornament to shape and love,
Mis-shapen in the conduct of them both,
Like powder in a skilless soldier’s flask,
Is set a-fire by thine own ignorance,
And thou dismember’d with thine own defence.
What, rouse thee, man! thy Juliet is alive,
For whose dear sake thou wast but lately dead;
There art thou happy: Tybalt would kill thee,
But thou slewest Tybalt; there art thou happy too:
The law, that threaten’d death, becomes thy friend,
And turns it to exile; there art thou happy:
A pack of blessings lights upon thy back;

Go, get thee to thy love, as was decreed,
Ascend her chamber, hence and comfort her:
But, look, thou stay not till the watch be set,
For then thou canst not pass to Mantua;
Where thou shalt live till we can find a time
To blaze your marriage, reconcile your friends,
Beg pardon of the prince, and call thee back
With twenty hundred thousand times more joy
Than thou went’st forth in lamentation.—
Go before, nurse: commend me to thy lady;
And bid her hasten all the house to bed,
Which heavy sorrow makes them apt unto.
Romeo is coming.

Nurse.
O Lord, I could have stay’d here all the night
To hear good counsel: O, what learning is!—
My lord, I’ll tell my lady you will come.

Romeo.
Do so, and bid my sweet prepare to chide.

Juliet.
Wilt thou be gone? it is not yet near day:
It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
That pierc’d the fearful hollow of thine ear;
Nightly she sings on yond pomegranate tree:
Believe me, love, it was the nightingale.

Romeo.
It was the lark, the herald of the morn,
No nightingale: look, love, what envious streaks
Do lace the severing clouds in yonder east:
Night’s candles are burnt out, and jocund day
Stands tiptoe on the misty mountain tops.
I must be gone and live, or stay and die.

Juliet.
O God! I have an ill-divining soul!
Methinks I see thee, now thou art below,
As one dead in the bottom of a tomb:
Either my eyesight fails, or thou look’st pale.

Lady Capulet.
Ay, sir; but she will none, she gives you thanks.
I would the fool were married to her grave!

Juliet.
Good father, I beseech you on my knees,
Hear me with patience but to speak a word.

Capulet.
Hang thee, young baggage! disobedient wretch!
I tell thee what,—get thee to church o’ Thursday,
Or never after look me in the face:
Speak not, reply not, do not answer me;

Juliet.
Tell me not, friar, that thou hear’st of this,
Unless thou tell me how I may prevent it:
If, in thy wisdom, thou canst give no help,
Do thou but call my resolution wise,
And with this knife I’ll help it presently.
God join’d my heart and Romeo’s, thou our hands;
And ere this hand, by thee to Romeo’s seal’d,
Shall be the label to another deed,
Or my true heart with treacherous revolt
Turn to another, this shall slay them both:
Therefore, out of thy long-experienc’d time,
Give me some present counsel; or, behold,
‘Twixt my extremes and me this bloody knife
Shall play the empire; arbitrating that
Which the commission of thy years and art
Could to no issue of true honour bring.
Be not so long to speak; I long to die,
If what thou speak’st speak not of remedy.

Friar.
Hold, daughter. I do spy a kind of hope,
Which craves as desperate an execution
As that is desperate which we would prevent.
If, rather than to marry County Paris
Thou hast the strength of will to slay thyself,
Then is it likely thou wilt undertake
A thing like death to chide away this shame,
That cop’st with death himself to scape from it;
And, if thou dar’st, I’ll give thee remedy.

Juliet.
O, bid me leap, rather than marry Paris,
From off the battlements of yonder tower;
Or walk in thievish ways; or bid me lurk
Where serpents are; chain me with roaring bears;
Or shut me nightly in a charnel-house,
O’er-cover’d quite with dead men’s rattling bones,
With reeky shanks and yellow chapless skulls;
Or bid me go into a new-made grave,
And hide me with a dead man in his shroud;
Things that, to hear them told, have made me tremble;
And I will do it without fear or doubt,
To live an unstain’d wife to my sweet love.

Friar.
Hold, then; go home, be merry, give consent
To marry Paris: Wednesday is to-morrow;
To-morrow night look that thou lie alone,
Let not thy nurse lie with thee in thy chamber:
Take thou this vial, being then in bed,
And this distilled liquor drink thou off:
When, presently, through all thy veins shall run
A cold and drowsy humour; for no pulse
Shall keep his native progress, but surcease:
No warmth, no breath, shall testify thou livest;

In the mean time, against thou shalt awake,
Shall Romeo by my letters know our drift;
And hither shall he come: and he and I
Will watch thy waking, and that very night
Shall Romeo bear thee hence to Mantua.
And this shall free thee from this present shame,
If no inconstant toy nor womanish fear
Abate thy valour in the acting it.
Juliet.
Give me, give me! O, tell not me of fear!

My dismal scene I needs must act alone.—
Come, vial.—
What if this mixture do not work at all?
Shall I be married, then, to-morrow morning?—
No, No!—this shall forbid it:—lie thou there.—

[Laying down her dagger.]

Capulet.
Ha! let me see her:—out alas! she’s cold;
Her blood is settled, and her joints are stiff;
Life and these lips have long been separated:
Death lies on her like an untimely frost
Upon the sweetest flower of all the field.
Accursed time! unfortunate old man!

Nurse.
O lamentable day!

Lady Capulet.
O woful time!

Capulet.
Death, that hath ta’en her hence to make me wail,
Ties up my tongue and will not let me speak.

[Enter Balthasar.]

News from Verona!—How now, Balthasar?
Dost thou not bring me letters from the friar?
How doth my lady? Is my father well?
How fares my Juliet? that I ask again;
For nothing can be ill if she be well.

Balthasar.
Then she is well, and nothing can be ill:
Her body sleeps in Capel’s monument,
And her immortal part with angels lives.
I saw her laid low in her kindred’s vault,
And presently took post to tell it you:
O, pardon me for bringing these ill news,
Since you did leave it for my office, sir.

Romeo.
Is it even so? then I defy you, stars!—
Thou know’st my lodging: get me ink and paper,
And hire post-horses. I will hence to-night.

Balthasar.
I do beseech you, sir, have patience:
Your looks are pale and wild, and do import
Some misadventure.

Paris.
This is that banish’d haughty Montague
That murder’d my love’s cousin,—with which grief,
It is supposed, the fair creature died,—
And here is come to do some villanous shame
To the dead bodies: I will apprehend him.—

[Advances.]

Stop thy unhallow’d toil, vile Montague!
Can vengeance be pursu’d further than death?
Condemned villain, I do apprehend thee;
Obey, and go with me; for thou must die.

Romeo.
I must indeed; and therefore came I hither.—
Good gentle youth, tempt not a desperate man;
Fly hence and leave me:—think upon these gone;
Let them affright thee.—I beseech thee, youth,
Put not another sin upon my head
By urging me to fury: O, be gone!

Death, that hath suck’d the honey of thy breath,
Hath had no power yet upon thy beauty:
Thou art not conquer’d; beauty’s ensign yet
Is crimson in thy lips and in thy cheeks,
And death’s pale flag is not advanced there.—
Tybalt, liest thou there in thy bloody sheet?
O, what more favour can I do to thee
Than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain
To sunder his that was thine enemy?
Forgive me, cousin!

Here’s to my love! [Drinks.]—O true apothecary!
Thy drugs are quick.—Thus with a kiss I die.

Juliet.
O comfortable friar! where is my lord?—
I do remember well where I should be,
And there I am:—where is my Romeo?

[Noise within.]

Friar.
I hear some noise.—Lady, come from that nest
Of death, contagion, and unnatural sleep:
A greater power than we can contradict
Hath thwarted our intents:—come, come away!

What’s here? a cup, clos’d in my true love’s hand?
Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end:—
O churl! drink all, and left no friendly drop
To help me after?—I will kiss thy lips;
Haply some poison yet doth hang on them,
To make me die with a restorative.

[Kisses him.]

Thy lips are warm!

1 Watch. [Within.] Lead, boy:—which way?

Juliet.
Yea, noise?—Then I’ll be brief.—O happy dagger!

[Snatching Romeo’s dagger.]

This is thy sheath [stabs herself]; there rest, and let me die.

Where be these enemies?—Capulet,—Montague,—
See what a scourge is laid upon your hate,
That heaven finds means to kill your joys with love!
And I, for winking at your discords too,
Have lost a brace of kinsmen:—all are punish’d.

Capulet.
O brother Montague, give me thy hand:
This is my daughter’s jointure, for no more
Can I demand.

Montague.
But I can give thee more:
For I will raise her statue in pure gold;
That while Verona by that name is known,
There shall no figure at such rate be set
As that of true and faithful Juliet.

Prince.
A glooming peace this morning with it brings;
The sun for sorrow will not show his head.
Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things;
Some shall be pardon’d, and some punished;
For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo.

What does it mean to speak and write correctly? What standard, what set of rules, whose example should the student aspire to? There actually exists an irrefutable answer to these questions.

Very simply, correct language usage is that which conveys to the intended audience the message and the impression the writer or speaker would like to give. Really this is the only measure that counts. Let’s call it the Reader Rule. To the extent that the reader receives the intended message and impression, the language is the correct choice. It then only remains to determine what that language is, given a specific body of readers.

If the readers or listeners are college professors or academic colleagues, the appropriate written language is probably a fairly formal variety of Standard English (SE), depending of course on the relationships involved. In other environments – the construction site, jazz studio, football pitch, gridiron, rodeo circuit, oil rig, prison, in various corners of the military – the language treated here might be largely inappropriate and ill suited to acceptance and camaraderie. The languages that would be fitting in these environments, while beyond the scope of this book, can certainly be researched, scrutinized and emulated using the methods here presented – to the extent that they are accessible in some recorded form on the Net.

In the academic or literary worlds and in most realms of business, one would rarely ever be censured for not breaking a grammar rule, for not misusing a word according to its dictionary definition or for not failing to tie the parts of a sentence together properly. On the other hand, committing such errors may well be a cause of embarrassment and opprobrium. In most cases, well-crafted academic language differs very little from one English speaking country to another and when it does, the minor spelling and stylistic variations would only very rarely impede complete comprehension. It is for those who would communicate and interact comfortably in these realms that this book was written.

Essay Writing
Project discussion. AssignmentsPlease do any as yet incomplete

What does it mean to speak and write correctly? What standard, what set of rules, whose example should the student aspire to? There actually exists an irrefutable answer to these questions.

Very simply, correct language usage is that which conveys to the intended audience the message and the impression the writer or speaker would like to give. Really this is the only measure that counts. Let’s call it the Reader Rule. To the extent that the reader receives the intended message and impression, the language is the correct choice. It then only remains to determine what that language is, given a specific body of readers.

If the readers or listeners are college professors or academic colleagues, the appropriate written language is probably a fairly formal variety of Standard English (SE), depending of course on the relationships involved. In other environments – the construction site, jazz studio, football pitch, gridiron, rodeo circuit, oil rig, prison, in various corners of the military – the language treated here might be largely inappropriate and ill suited to acceptance and camaraderie. The languages that would be fitting in these environments, while beyond the scope of this book, can certainly be researched, scrutinized and emulated using the methods here presented – to the extent that they are accessible in some recorded form on the Net.

In the academic or literary worlds and in most realms of business, one would rarely ever be censured for not breaking a grammar rule, for not misusing a word according to its dictionary definition or for not failing to tie the parts of a sentence together properly. On the other hand, committing such errors may well be a cause of embarrassment and opprobrium. In most cases, well-crafted academic language differs very little from one English speaking country to another and when it does, the minor spelling and stylistic variations would only very rarely impede complete comprehension. It is for those who would communicate and interact comfortably in these realms that this book was written.

Essay Writing
Please continue to write essays, narratives, screeds or diatribes. Lower Priority AssignmentsTerry Eagleton on the war on terror. Eagleton is one of the great speakers. Older Assignments
(please do these if you haven’t already)

MacBeth.

A MacBeth page has been created with two excellent video versions including one starring Sir Ian McKellen and Dame Judy Dench. Please watch.

The Zoo in Winter. Please watch this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

ReadingPlease read: Article: Writers Should Not Fear Jargon by Trevor Quirk. Quirk wields words beautifully. In this piece he treats the importance of using appropriate vocabulary. If you are interested, go on to read his thoughtful and somewhat deprecatory but intensely eloquent review of Waking Up by Sam Harris.

Shakespeare

Please see the Romeo and Juliet page, watch the videos, refer to the text, try to identify the quotes:

Some quotes to identify in Romeo and Juliet. We’ll discuss these and their significance this week:

“Some consequence yet hanging in the stars.”

“I am fortune’s fool.”

“I defy you stars.”

“O what more favor can I do to thee than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain to sunder his that was thine enemy.” Forgive me cousin.

Death’s pale flag is not advanced there.

Blistered be thy tongue.

100 words of that tongue’s utterance.

And yet I wish but for the thing I have.

She hath forsworn to love and in that vow, do I live dead that live to tell it now.

Love moderately. Long love does so.

Like fire and powder which when they kiss, consume.

Not so deep as a well nor so wide as a church door but ’tis enough. ‘Twill serve.

Mercutio’s soul is but a little way above our heads. Either thou, or I, or both shall go with him.

‘Tis the nightingale and not the lark that pierces the fearful hollow of thine ear.

The more I give to thee, the more I have for both are infinite.

There art thou happy.

Run through the ear with a love song.

This distilling liquor drink thou of.

You ratcatcher!

Here in my house do him disparagement.

I am for you boy.

Beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear.

Not having that, which having, makes them short.

‘Tis twenty years till then.

All are punished!

Oh that I were a glove upon that hand.

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.

The blind bow-boy’s butt shaft.

Trespass sweetly urged.

vile submission.

Oh happy dagger!

Too flattering sweet to be substantial.

Lest that thy love prove likewise variable.

Too early seen unknown, and known too late.

Thou speak’st of nothing.

A mutiny among my guests.

A brace of kinsmen.

Never was a story of more woe.

It is an honor that I dream not of.

Prince of cats.

My ghostly father.

You are a princox.

A challenge.

The forefinger of an alderman.

Take back the villain that late thou gavest me.

Misadventured piteous overthrows.

Drawn, and talk of peace?

Another out to have.

Nor any other part belonging to a man.

There rust and let me die.

Come madam, let’s away.

Much upon those years that thou art yet a maid.

Swallowed all my hopes but she.

He jests at scars that never felt a wound.

Scorn at our solemnity.

Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

Verona brags of him.

What say you to my suit?

They stumble who run fast.

And for that name that is no part of thee, take all myself.

I have forgot that name and that name’s woe.

I remember well where I should be.

Churl! Drunk all and left no kindly drop to help me after.

for stony limits cannot hold love out.

Language immersion Please watch this short talk by Douglas Adams on his experience as a writer. Shall we look further at his works?

Please watch this short talk by Ken Robinson on education. Does it inspire you to write an essay?
Grammar

What does it mean to speak and write correctly? What standard, what set of rules, whose example should the student aspire to? There actually exists an irrefutable answer to these questions.

Very simply, correct language usage is that which conveys to the intended audience the message and the impression the writer or speaker would like to give. Really this is the only measure that counts. Let’s call it the Reader Rule. To the extent that the reader receives the intended message and impression, the language is the correct choice. It then only remains to determine what that language is, given a specific body of readers.

If the readers or listeners are college professors or academic colleagues, the appropriate written language is probably a fairly formal variety of Standard English (SE), depending of course on the relationships involved. In other environments – the construction site, jazz studio, football pitch, gridiron, rodeo circuit, oil rig, prison, in various corners of the military – the language treated here might be largely inappropriate and ill suited to acceptance and camaraderie. The languages that would be fitting in these environments, while beyond the scope of this book, can certainly be researched, scrutinized and emulated using the methods here presented – to the extent that they are accessible in some recorded form on the Net.

In the academic or literary worlds and in most realms of business, one would rarely ever be censured for not breaking a grammar rule, for not misusing a word according to its dictionary definition or for not failing to tie the parts of a sentence together properly. On the other hand, committing such errors may well be a cause of embarrassment and opprobrium. In most cases, well-crafted academic language differs very little from one English speaking country to another and when it does, the minor spelling and stylistic variations would only very rarely impede complete comprehension. It is for those who would communicate and interact comfortably in these realms that this book was written.

Essay Writing
Please continue to write essays, narratives, screeds or diatribes. Lower Priority AssignmentsTerry Eagleton on the war on terror. Eagleton is one of the great speakers. Older Assignments
(please do these if you haven’t already)

MacBeth.

A MacBeth page has been created with two excellent video versions including one starring Sir Ian McKellen and Dame Judy Dench. Please watch.

The Zoo in Winter. Please watch this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

Debate
The initial debate topic was assigned:“It is appropriate to censor certain things in the media” Let’s do it. We will all try to take both sides.

Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays was provided as a quick overview for deciding on a play to do. We have selected MacBeth to start with.

Essay Writing
We may discuss further essays from the book: Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179. These demonstrate consistently excellent language: metaphor, collocation, coordination constructs, felicitous vocabulary, concision and concinnity. We will examine all of these and practice them in both writing and speech. Let’s start by examining these devices as used by the masters.

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

A MacBeth page has been created with two excellent video versions including one starring Sir Ian McKellen and Dame Judy Dench. Let’s discuss them.

Let’s discuss the heated and rebarbative debate with lots of ad hominem deprecation. Note the striking difference between the language of the two debaters. Which would you prefer to emulate? Christopher Hitchens and George Galloway debate intervention in Iraq.

Here is a fairly comprehensive List Of Fallacious Arguments
for reference.

Let’s possibly discuss further a couple of Scholastic Writing Award winning essays, one persuasive and one a personal memoir: Let’s discuss chapters 1 and 2 in the text.

Let’s discuss submitted projects. These may have been drawn from the list of suggested debate topics, a query letter, an admissions essay or perhaps the writing projects at the end of chapter 1 in the text.

Language immersion: Some fun with animals and language:

The Zoo in Winter. Let’s discuss this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

Please let me know if you need more homework.

Older Assignments (please do these if you haven’t already)Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

A classroom page for examples of successful essays contains a couple of examples from the essay book,

Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179. We did read parts; please read them more thoroughly and prepare to speculate upon the characteristics that make them successful.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Be familiar with the list of suggested debate topics
Please read the first chapter in our textbook: SAT ACT TOEFL College Prep English Practice, available at the EIE bookstore and Amazon.com.

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Please watch the Oxford Unionwhistleblower debate.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

Notes
(Note that all videos are easily found with a search on youtube. For access to our classroom, see http://abacus-es.com/eie/advancedwriting.html)We discussed at length the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald, noting the devices used, points made and language employed.

We discussed debate topics for class but did not decide on anything in particular. The debate topic: “It is appropriate to censor certain things in the media” looks like a good one. Let’s do it. Please be prepared to take both sides.

Updated Assignments

MacBeth.

A MacBeth page has been created with two excellent video versions including one starring Sir Ian McKellen and Dame Judy Dench. Please watch.

Debate:

Let’s prepare for a debate next week on “It is appropriate to censor certain things in the media.” Please be prepared to take both sides.

Please watch: Christopher Hitchens and George Galloway debate intervention in Iraq. A heated and rebarbative debate with lots of ad hominem deprecation. Note the striking difference between the language of the two debaters. Which would you prefer to emulate?

William F. Buckley vs Noam Chomsky
An old debate between legendary orators. The subject matter is historical but Buckley’s language is always superb.

Please look at theList Of Fallacious Arguments

In class we briefly examined a couple of Scholastic Writing Award winning essays, one persuasive and one a personal memoir. Please read them through looking for vocabulary, expressive devices, arc and subject matter. We will discuss them a bit more next week.

Language immersion: Some fun with animals and language:

The Zoo in Winter. Please listen to this wonderful piece by Jonathan Miller for its eloquence. How far does your spoken language need to go to mimic his?

Please read chapter 2 in the text if you have time.

Please be sure to write and post something this week. Consider a position paper on one of the topics in the list of suggested debate topics, a query letter, an admissions essay or perhaps the writing projects at the end of chapter 1 in the text.

Please let me know if you need more homework.

Older Assignments (please do these if you haven’t already)

Please watch the debate on US surveillance with Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz and constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald. Enjoy watching this epic eloquence battle between eristic giants.

A classroom page for examples of successful essays contains a couple of examples from the essay book, Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179. We did read parts; please read them more thoroughly and prepare to speculate upon the characteristics that make them successful.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview. We decided to do MacBeth, possibly followed by Romeo and Juliet

Be familiar with the list of suggested debate topics
Please read the first chapter in our textbook: SAT ACT TOEFL College Prep English Practice, available at the EIE bookstore and Amazon.com.

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

You will all have watched the debate on US surveillance between Harvard Law Professor Alan Dershowitz, constitutional attorney and journalist Glenn Greenwald, Reddit co-founder Alexis Ohanian and Gen. Michael Hayden, former head of the NSA and CIA.

We will discuss the language used, the rhetorical devices used, the catch phrases and the presence and absence of facts. Please bring your thoughts.

ShakespeareYou will have put some thought into Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays was provided as a quick overview.

Essay Writing
We may discuss further essays from the book: Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179. These demonstrate consistently excellent language: metaphor, collocation, coordination constructs, felicitous vocabulary, concision and concinnity. We will examine all of these and practice them in both writing and speech. Let’s start by examining these devices as used by the masters.

2015 Scholastic Writing AwardsThis is a contest to which we may want to submit papers.

The query letter
EIE is starting up a new blog that may need contributions from students. Let’s be very proper and submit query letters.

The lead, which is designed to catch the editor’s attention. It might be a startling statistic, a time peg, or an anecdote. Your lead should interest the editor enough to continue reading your query.

The why-write-it section. This paragraph (or two, if you have a particularly detailed query) fleshes out the idea, demonstrating why the readers of the magazine will be interested in the topic.

The nuts-and-bolts paragraph. Here you give the details of the story itself. What types of sources will you contact? How long will the story be? Will it have sidebars, and if so, how many? What section of the magazine will the story fit in? What’s the working title?

The I’m-so-great paragraph, or ISG. Here you highlight your relevant qualifications, including your writing experience and background with the subject matter. This is the paragraph in which you showcase your unique qualifications and convince the editor to give you the assignment.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview.

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

In what direction should our reading/watching/listening go initially? Let’s at least start on a Shakespeare play.

Essay Writing
We discussed an essay from the book: Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179. We will be reading and excerpting from this book in class, but you might like your own copy. These demonstrate consistently excellent language: metaphor, collocation, coordination constructs, felicitous vocabulary, concision and concinnity. We will examine all of these and practice them in both writing and speech. Let’s start by examining these devices as used by the masters.

High Priority Assignments

(Note: these assignments should be enjoyable. Do only as much as you find enjoyable. If you find them to be onerous and pointless, please help shape future assignments with your suggestions)

Please look through the list of suggested debate topics further and propose specific instances for debate in class. Please think of debate topics that would not require a great deal of research. Feel free to explore any of the many other debates posted in our classroom.

Please consider Shakespeare plays for watching, dramatic readings and discussion. Suggestions: Much Ado About Nothing, As You Like It, The Tempest, A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Taming of the Shrew, MacBeth, Hamlet, Romeo and Juliet. Please refer to Masefield’s Guide to the Shakespeare Plays for a quick overview.

Please be sure to write and post something this week. Consider perhaps the writing projects at the end of chapter 1 in the text.

Please watch this High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Please watch the Oxford Unionwhistleblower debate.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Please post questions, suggestions and discussion

A Thank you to those who have already posted in the Writer’s Forum or Vocabulary Journals. Let’s all post something for next week. Agenda

Class planning

Though there is always a plan, class direction is protean and opportunistic in that we will explore any avenue that seems not fruitful for all (as long as we do it in formal English). However, some planing is indicated in order to allow for some needed preparation. Let’s brainstorm.

A starting point:

How much homework is enough?

In what direction should our reading/watching/listening go initially?

Essay Writing
Students in this class have evinced interest in a number of writing styles. Some want to work on college admission essays, others on SAT essays and nonfiction persuasive and informative material. These are wonderful goals. We will explore great writing in all these areas but we do need to understand that skill in all of these requires mastery of formal written English, to which we then add imagination, insight, research, analysis and, in some cases (SAT) some gratuitous prolixity. (Reminder: always look up any unfamiliar word that you encounter.)

A list of suggested debate topics has been posted in our classroom. Let’s discuss them.

(Note: these assignments should be enjoyable. Do only as much as you find enjoyable. If you find them to be onerous and pointless, please help shape future assignments with your suggestions)

Please look at the few college admission essays in our classroom. We will discuss them. There are more to come. A classroom page for examples of successful essays has been created and is a work in progress. I have been enjoying the book: Essays That Worked edited by Boykin Curry, ISBN: 0449905179.

Conclusions about the SAT essay: Dr. Perelman of MIT on the SAT essay exam.

Let’s discuss the list of suggested debate topics.

Let’s discuss the High School Debate Contest, the City Club of Cleveland’s High School Debate Championship. Debate is on whether the US should support and comply with the International Criminal Court.This is a very fine debate with positions well presented and justified. The commentary is also very useful, particularly for it’s explanation of the judges’ evaluation of the contestants.

Please think of debate topics that would not require a great deal of research. Feel free to explore any of the many other debates posted in our classroom. Please read the first chapter in our textbook: SAT ACT TOEFL College Prep English Practice, available at the EIE bookstore and Amazon.com.

We’re all on the same page in this class; we all want to learn and want to help each other to learn. The subject is fascinating and we need to keep it fascinating. If the class degenerates into a quotidian struggle to fulfill requirements for credit and grades, we have lost the battle and are no better than public school. The class is flexible and can adjust to individual enthusiasm and fascination, thus the onus is on each member of the class to lead it in directions that will be most productive and enjoyable.

We looked briefly at a brilliant Longfellow poem. Shall we examine it more closely?

Travels by the Fireside
— H. W. Longfellow

The ceaseless rain is falling fast,
And yonder gilded vane,
Immovable for three days past,
Points to the misty main,

It drives me in upon myself
And to the fireside gleams,
To pleasant books that crowd my shelf,
And still more pleasant dreams,

I read whatever bards have sung
Of lands beyond the sea,
And the bright days when I was young
Come thronging back to me.

In fancy I can hear again
The Alpine torrent’s roar,
The mule-bells on the hills of Spain,
The sea at Elsinore.

I see the convent’s gleaming wall
Rise from its groves of pine,
And towers of old cathedrals tall,
And castles by the Rhine.

I journey on by park and spire,
Beneath centennial trees,
Through fields with poppies all on fire,
And gleams of distant seas.

I fear no more the dust and heat,
No more I feel fatigue,
While journeying with another’s feet
O’er many a lengthening league.

Let others traverse sea and land,
And toil through various climes,
I turn the world round with my hand
Reading these poets’ rhymes.

From them I learn whatever lies
Beneath each changing zone,
And see, when looking with their eyes,
Better than with mine own.

New reading and watching thoughts

Let’s examine what you are reading and would like to explore.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore and suggest any specific items for inclusion in our high priority assignments.Questions, suggestions and discussion

Welcome to the 2014-2015 College Prep English Class at Excellence In Education which will meet on Thursdays at 2:30 in the large classroom at EIE starting Thursday Sept. 11. To learn more about the class, please visit: http://abacus-es.com/eie/advancedwriting.html, see the links and watch the video.

This class is open to students of any age who would like to undertake the study of formal college-level English and is intended to provide an academic environment that is comfortable for students with a wide range of learning styles, from those who prefer a traditional classroom environment to those who prefer to do all their work online and everyone in between. Even the use of pencil and paper is acceptable, though (together with quill and parchment or stylus and clay tablets) it is discouraged.

Agenda

Record keeping, introductions

The first class is always confused and chaotic as mundane tasks are completed. We will try to confine the chaos to the first half hour.Textbook

The textbook is SAT ACT TOEFL College Prep English Practice, available at the EIE bookstore and Amazon.com. We will use the text as a foundation and reference for grammar and style but will explore many other sources in multiple media, all of which will be supplied in our online classroom.

Discussion of class curricula

This class will focus largely upon immersion in formal academic English. The specific subject matter covered is very flexible and will be tailored to the needs and interests of the students, ranging possibly from the study of classic literature to essay writing, test-taking skills, memorization practice, note taking, debate and oratory, research paper development and may very possibly explore other entirely serendipitous and unanticipated realms.

We covered a great deal last year including three Shakespeare plays (Twelfth Night, Much Ado about Nothing, Henry V) together with some Jane Austen, George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, P.G. Wodehouse, Abraham Lincoln, J.R.R. Tolkien, Jerome K. Jerome, Maya Angelou, Bertrand Russell, David Berlinski, Thomas Paine, Douglas Adams, Kenneth Grahame, Stephen Hawking and many other greats. Please feel free to peruse last year’s postings in the assignment forum.

We engaged in debates, recitations and lectures, wrote scripts, essays, papers and narratives and were inspired by some of the greatest writers and orators of the English speaking world.

We read and studied papers in scholarly journals and practiced both writing and speaking in formal academic English.

And we had fun doing it! Now, let’s start again with new direction and enthusiasm.

Class Organization

In-class time is used only for for interactive activities: oratory, discussion and recitations and never for reading, writing, watching videos and doing assignments, all of which take place on or off-line during the week. Absent online participants will be able to take part in the in-class sessions.

Though class sessions are recorded, there is no camera in the classroom; only audio and screensharing are broadcast and archived. We just switched the class broadcasts to Google Plus last year, having previously used WiziQ. Neither is ideal as they use a technology that is perpetually in its infancy and never permitted to mature. Class recordings are unedited and often fraught with problems or wasted time as attempts are made to solve those problems. Please be indulgent.

Our online classroom contains a vast trove of English language resources ranging from full text books and audiobooks to films, plays, software and all of the assignments and activities generated in previous years. Please feel free to explore. We will use these and expand upon them.Questions, suggestions and discussion

This class is open to students of any age who are ready to work on college-level English and may be taken repeatedly as it is different every year. If you have taken the class before, please share your experiences with others, and you are welcome to join us as an advanced student as we explore new ground. Parents are always welcome.We covered a great deal last year including three Shakespeare plays (Twelfth Night, Much Ado about Nothing, Henry V) together with some Jane Austen, George Bernard Shaw, Oscar Wilde, P.G. Wodehouse, Abraham Lincoln, J.R.R. Tolkien, Jerome K. Jerome, Maya Angelou, Bertrand Russell, David Berlinski, Thomas Paine, Douglas Adams, Kenneth Grahame, Stephen Hawking and many other greats (not to mention Edgar Rice Burroughs and the Klingon version of Hamlet).

We engaged in debates, recitations and lectures and were inspired by some of the greatest writers and orators of the English speaking world.

We read and studied papers in scholarly journals and practiced both writing and speaking in formal academic English.

And we had fun!

The class uses the text: SAT, ACT TOEFL College Prep English but will cover many other things as well, to be determined by the interests and inspiration of class members. Writing and speaking skills and techniques for the felicitous presentation of cogent and compelling prose will be covered together with advanced vocabulary, language usage, comprehension, grammar and style that will serve students well in college and college credit examinations. Class members will study and emulate the work of the masters of words and will prepare and deliver scripted and improvisatory oratory in lecture, debate, interview and dramatic settings with a view to wielding language effectively.

This is one of the greatest examples of homeschooling correspondence in history — the communication and courtship of two of the most brilliant wordsmiths of the 19th century.

Elizabeth Barrett and Robert Browning

This Librivox audio recording of the work is incomplete and thus not yet in the Librivox catalog but it is beautifully done and all the important parts of the correspondence are covered.

Robert Browning and Elizabeth Barrett (later Browning) were two of the greatest homeschoolers, unschoolers, autodidacts in history and their correspondence is a monument to philology. As they had both taught themselves French, Latin and Greek before age 15 are were very widely read, their letters do contain a wealth of rather recondite references, but translations are handled well in the audiobook version.

‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

You have no doubt already read the discussion of scansion and form in poetry, music and art. We will discuss these. Prepare any questions you have and ask them. We will apply these principles in our study of poems.

was free of technical problems at last and may be watched or downloaded. We discussed the power of the written word as addressed in the assignment to listen to the first part of Unacknowledged Legislation for its use of language as well as its message. Please listen to the rest for next week and take careful vocabulary notes.

TIMING TOAST
Grook on how to char for yourself

There’s an art of knowing when.
Never try to guess.
Toast until it smokes and then
twenty seconds less.

In the spirit of this lecture, we examined examples of influential dissident poetry, the grooks of Piet Hein which came into being when he was a member of the Danish resistance movement during NAZI occupation. Please read the rest of them; many are brilliant.

Please bring favorite poems. Those who so wish may be asked to recite. We will be covering poetry next week, including a discussion of scansion and form in poetry, music and art, but emphasis will be upon great poetic works.

Try writing your own poetry. The easiest way to start is to take the scansion, structure, rhyme scheme of an existing poem and substitute your own words. Our Poetry Forum contains both great classic poems and student works. Please submit yours. A poetry section has also been added to our main classroom page.

The homework was to watch at least the first part of Unacknowledged Legislation — a speech given at Rutgers University on the power of the written word in politics and social transformation — and to listen to it for its use of language as well as its message. You all took careful vocabulary notes. Let’s discuss terms he uses and your vocabulary journals.

Suggested writing project — the power of words: Put into words a complaint, diatribe or persuasive work. Express an opinion that you feel strongly about. We will discuss projects submitted this week on his theme.

Dangling participles
It would seem fairly obvious, but one of the most important elements of writing is to say what you actually mean. It’s very easy to say something else without realizing it. Let’s explore this problem.

A pronoun must refer to a single noun, not a phrase or a collection of oddments and especially may not refer to nothing at all. Check your work to determine the reference for pronouns.

Wrong:

The accountant’s wheelbarrow was full of eels, which irritated the fastidious spectator.

The which does not refer to a specific noun. Are the eels irritating the professor, or is it the presence of the wheelbarrow?

Better:

The presence of eels in the accountant’s wheelbarrow irritated the fastidious spectator.

Try to determine what is wrong with the following sentences, and correct them, posting your versions in the writers forum.

While trying ineffectually to retrieve the eggplant centerpiece from his neighbor’s trout pond, Rupert’s phone wouldn’t stop playing Monteverdi’s Orfeo and the chicken just kept dancing until Irmgard threw a yogurt-encrusted spatula at him.

The spinning wheel stood on the ancient parapet before it was dismantled.

There was a rumor going around that the library’s copy of 16 More Things to Do in Zero Gravity had been used to store the dessicated duck’s liver long after the expiry date and it was nasty.

The banner flew in the sparkling sun as the cavalcade approached the battlements just before it disappeared from view.

Harold helped Hermione rewrite the screenplay of Delightful Moments with Hideous People before being insulted by the dockworker, and it reminded her of a mermaid on a motorcycle.

The day after the strange incident with the petulant penguin, Mabel found Hermione and Penelope putting the finishing touches on the marble bust of Jane Austin and then she came down with a bad cold and hid it in the refrigerator until she could think of a better way to explain why she missed the deadline.

The members of the sixth grade cooking class were issued charismatic wooden spoons, but were told by the three whisk-wielding Muscovites that they were expected to present them to the members of the board of holistic balloonists when they finished their tour of the campus model-railroader’s exhibit of extinct Siberian waterfowl.

Dear Scholars,
Class this week was again beset with technical problems. Much thanks goes to Justin for letting us run the class on his computer and for handling the screen. Thanks also to online student LaRa for serving as host to online class visitors who were confused by the delay. This technical problem has been resolved but who knows what insidious glitches may plague us in the future. Apologies also if the lecture and class were less cogent and cohesive than usual — though as computer traumas do seem to be the norm, it’s not at all clear that there is any established precedent for normality in our class with which to compare. We keep hoping. The recording of the class is online, but the audio doesn’t start until about 10 minutes in.

The theme of this class was the written word, but time was also spent on discussion of innate and intuitive language learning as opposed to the the conscious study of language rules, together with a general discussion of rules as opposed to creativity. On a similarly subversive note, we also revisited the history of Apple somewhat, following up on Derek’s talk on Apple and the lecture by Stephen Fry given at the T3 Gadget Awards 2010 which was assigned for this week. We also viewed the 1984 Apple Macintosh commercial which referenced the dystopian world of Orwell’s Big Brother. This was particularly appropriate as our Windows Vista class computer was non-functional and the class was being conducted on an Apple. We considered the possibility of exploring further the works of George Orwell.

Suggestions for the last few minutes of class were requested and 20 questions was submitted. We played 20 questions rather badly.

Homework:
Please watch at least the first part of Unacknowledged Legislation — a speech given at Rutgers University on the power of the written word in politics and social transformation. It’s fairly long, so we’ll give it two weeks. Listen to it for its use of language as well as its message. Be sure to have your vocabulary journals and dictionaries handy.

Suggested writing project — the power of words: Put into words a complaint, diatribe or persuasive work. Express an opinion that you feel strongly about.Please continue to post and read material in the Balderdash Forum. More words will be added.

The PBS special on Mark Twain broadcast Sunday and about which I sent a notification to the class turned out not to be the one described in the guide. It had nothing to do with Peter Ustinov, but was instead a Ken Burns documentary. It was nonetheless excellent as all Burns’ documentaries seem to be. I hope you all get a chance to see it. If you missed it Sunday, it is all on youtube. Please watch PBS Ken Burns’ Mark Twain a wonderful chronicle of Mark Twain’s development as an author.

Some excellent papers have been submitted. It is time to create a “ready for publication repository.” Please think of a pseudonym, a pen name you would like to use.

A new Ready for Publication Forum has been created in our online classroom. This forum is a repository for papers ready for publication. After your paper is corrected and polished, please post it here with your pseudonymous byline and any other comments about publication you would like to make.

An Op-Ed piece of mine, “The Student as Teacher,” has been posted. The CHN Editor wanted it trimmed down to 1000 words from its original 1600 words before printing it in the fall issue. That’s a lot to cut. This is the final version. Does it work? Comments? Suggestions?

Editing examples:
Justin
Snowboarding is an extreme and intense winter sport with a considerable chance of injuries [that can result from incidents] ranging from innocent little slips to high impact crashes [slips and crashes are not in themselves injuries].
Colin
There is nothing like exploring caves and crevices in the hot day and sitting, watching, listening, to the stillness in the night [This parallel doesn’t really work:

sitting to the stillnesswatching to the stillnesslistening to the stillness

On the other hand, this one does work, but not if you use a comma

sittingwatchinglistening to the stillness (without the comma)]

…
A strange vibrating in the rock aroused me; I sat up confused as one does when awoken suddenly, trying to remember where I was and what I was doing there. As I gained my bearings and opened my eyes, a blinding blue-white light rose up from the ground a few miles away. It started rising slowly, then picked up speed travelling [“traveling”, are you using a British spell checker?] up into the night sky.

Derek

It used bulletproof plastic and stainless steel plates to cover the outer shell of the vehicle. The inner workings of the automobile had gears, tubes, tanks, motors, batteries, and other energy-efficient tools. The windshield was [“constructed” might be better. “Devised of” doesn’t really work.] devised of bulletproof glass and the interior of the car contained a GPS, a Wi-Fi hotspot, a cup holder, a built-in compact water cooler, solar panels on the car roof, a touchscreen media player, four Blu-ray disc players, a built-in digital clock (attached to the ceiling), a twenty-point-five megapixel camera for video calling and chatting, misty air conditioning, cotton cushion seats; non-leather (or any other animal skin for that matter), an Internet-enabled hologram, and other favorable features. [Fascinating visionary picture!]

…

“Yes Bob! I do understand that the democratic evaluations of the austere community will defuse the discernment, which, lies within the political distribution. However, by using the incentive solution, which defies connections to the government’s bank, I may withdraw my own fidelities’ assumption of credits, without using more than ten percent of the Senate’s monthly interest. Therefore, it would be foolish to criticize me, without even thinking about the tax we would establish if we were to gain money from the US Treasury,” I explained. [Superb. Probably not particularly meaningful but certainly an insight into character.]

Micah

It was so beautiful![one sentence here would be best. Otherwise this is a fragment:]So different from the world Shaneka had known as a young girl.There was a swirl of rainbow colors around her as their “three-person” submersible descended through the Mesopelagic [!] twilight zone, surrounded by various bioluminescent creatures as the majority of illuminating light from the surface slowly became non-existent.

Sam

I was alone on a ship full of droids and sith [] . I had to get off but I couldn’t find a way. Every possible way is [Do not switch tenses. It started in past tense. Stay there.] blocked hangers, escape pods, and the emergency hatches [–] all of them.

How team members with different levels of domain knowledge jointly accomplished the activities of knowledge co-construction was also discussed. [The ways in which team members with different levels of domain knowledge jointly engaged in the activities and achieved knowledge co-construction is also discussed.]Homework for next weekThink of a pseudonym for yourself.

Prepare and post finished essays that you feel are deserving in the new Ready for Publication Forum in our online classroom together with your pseudonymous byline and any other comments about publication you would like to make.

Serialized narratives may be submitted an episode at a time, but, once submitted, you are committed to completing them. Project credit is granted to published pieces, even if they have already received credit.

Please read and post any comments or suggestions you have on “The Student as Teacher.” It has been submitted and accepted already, but I would appreciate the input.