Wednesday, November 13, 2013

On ToothFairies.

I want to talk about this kid now.

Cuz really. She is just the bees knees.

I have to say, I really think the most amazing, miraculous, blow-my-mind part of motherhood has been the experience of witnessing how my very own, singular heart can beat in such multiple, separate, distinctive, infinitive ways for each of my children.

Last week, she lost her second tooth. It was a BIG DEAL. As always.

She insisted she didn't want to give it to the tooth fairy. Instead, she said she was going to make a necklace out of it. Okay then, said I.

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I should have known.

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I am her MOTHER. I have been RAISING this child.

How could I have not seen this coming from a mile away?!

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{Finn and Lily, buds.}

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The next morning, she stormed accusingly, triumphantly, indignantly! through my bedroom door and announced:

" A HAAAA! THERE. IS. NO. TOOTH. FAIRY."

"Whattttttt? What are you talking about Lu?"
She squinted her eyes knowingly at me as she pointed at my face and explained,

"Well, did you say you wanted her to come OUT LOUD?""Huh? No.Why did I need to say it out loud?""Well, because, ahem, you know...well, EVERYBODY KNOWS really...that if you declare OUT LOUD that you DON'T want the tooth fairy to come, when really you DO, then you must reverse that declaration by saying OUT LOUD again that you DO indeed want her to come."
{silence. stare down. don't blink don't blink don't blink. she's been able to smell insecurity since her infancy}

"Why?""Because think about it, Lu. For all she knew you wanted to STORE it under your pillow. As a keepsake?A good luck charm? Something to give you good dreams? The tooth fairy isn't going to go swiping it, STEALING teeth that she expressly OVERHEARD is not intended for her taking. You know."**{hold the gaze. hold it hold it hold it hold it.}{**if there is some sort of existential Hell for all the unethical liarface santa claus toothfairy easter bunny parents out there, i have just consigned my fate to it for eternity. whatever, sign me up. but i'm not going down without a fight.}

The stare down continued for another minute. Until, a slow surrender, marked by a single raised brow and a suspicious glare as she ssslowly paced backwards out of my bedroom. It was Lily's signature I've got your number signal.

PHHHHHEW. Can't screw this up. Kid's going to be up watching like a HAWK {or Haack? cccclever!} all night.

Later, after a hectic day, I crashed into my bed around midnight. Settled into my pillow ready for sleep when luckily I suddenly jolted to attention! Tooth fairy time!!!!! I ran downstairs and grab a $5 bill (a bit of a raise, call it a guilty late fee}. I sneaked into her room and found her breathing to the heavy, rhythmic beat of deep slumber. The contours of her ever developing, beautiful features still encase the last remnants of the cherubic baby-face I've studied nightly for seven years. I peeked under her pillow to feel around for the tooth. I felt a small box. I quickly slipped the $5 bill under and tip-toed out of the room.

As I stepped out into the light of the hallway I opened my hand to see a miniature Milk Dud box, wrapped in construction paper like a miniature gift. I unwrapped the contents to find her tooth wrapped in a miniature note that she had composed with extra-miniature handwriting.

Dear Toothfairy,

Thank you for my teeth.

This is for you.Love,Lily

And inside she had tucked a coppery, shiny penny.

And at that moment, past midnight, holding her mini Milk Dud box and sweet note and little tooth and shiny penny,