As we’ve mentioned once or twice on the show, we get a lot of great listener mail at the CME podcast. We’re going to go ahead and attribute that to the uncommonly intelligent, witty, and literate crowd that the CME draws in with its own uncommonly intelligent, witty, and literate product. I guess what I’m saying is, we take credit for your emails. The good ones, anyway. The crappy ones are on you, and you should feel bad about them.

Anywho, there simply isn’t time for us to read all your emails on the podcast without a) breaking one of our solemn vows, and b) letting •••• get real redundant around here. At the same time, we don’t want you to think your questions are ending up in the same dark hole as your letters to Santa and/or God. We also don’t want to just throw them on the site without comment, because, c’mon, that’s not the kind of dudes we are. We’re the dudes who post your emails, but also convey our feelings on them via the magic of GIFs. Trust us, ten years from now all human communication will happen this way. We’ll all be idiots by then, so it’ll be fine.

From Sacha Brady: For some odd reason, I found myself thinking about MMA ring girls’ attire.

Then I suddenly wondered about Invicta–do they have ring girls, or do they have ring guys, and if so, what do they wear? Can you see a time when we’ll have moved past the point of needing people to sashay round the ring holding numbered boards to help those who can’t count to three recognise what round it is?

Bruce Buffer only has to read people’s names so why can’t he take on this heavy responsibility? To keep costs down, perhaps we could even see Dana White charging round outside of the ring?

From Brian Martin: Pretty sure there was an unprecedented level of pussyfooting going on in every post-fight interview Vitor Belfort gave, and ESPECIALLY in Chael Sonnen’s analysis wherein you could almost see him jumping the shark. Should we be “in” on the TRT joke, or just plain embarrassed?

From Cory Whichard: Moving forward, will we ever see Vitor Belfort fight outside of Brazil? Would Dana White and Joe Silva risk a situation where Belfort manages to beat Anderson Silva, but then is only able to defend the middleweight championship in Brazil?

It seems to me that if the UFC executives are unwilling to offer him a rematch with Anderson Silva, then Belfort’s career is about to take a weird turn. Is Vitor Belfort destined to become the scariest perennial gatekeeper in the UFC: a mullet-wearing, synthetically-enhanced fight veteran who constantly talks about dinosaurs and Jesus?
From Danno: To paraphrase the one and only Gilbert Yvel, “why evan dunham always getting ••••ed, man?”
From Nicholas Picholas: Am I wrong to suggest this TRT problem is partly the media’s fault?

While I respect the work from both Ben and Chad, I feel like you don’t give enough •••• to TRT users. Vitor is obviously a cheater, whether the Testosterone-Osaurus Rex says it’s legal or not, but what about the others? Why does no one ever give Dan Henderson ••••? Or Forrest Griffin, Chael Sonnen, Frank Mir? They’re all cheaters. I recognize that they haven’t been fighting recently but where are your articles saying they’re ••••ing up the sport? Is it only Vitor who gets •••• because he got caught in the past and he’s not a “Warrior” like Dan Henderson (whatever the •••• that means). You guys gotta be hard on everyone or we’ll be reading Ben’s Through the Past Darkly for the next 5 years with “TRT” in every title.
From George Hayman: You’re certainly going to address Vitors response to post-fight-TRT-questions in one of the rounds BUT let me offer an opinion that might fit in there. I saw many people asking why TRT use is such a big deal with Belfort and not with Hendo, for example: Because it is so blatant! Same with Overeem even before he was busted: they’re basically insulting our intelligence by expecting us to believe they’re not chemhancing themselves.
From Alex Barlett: It seems as if every TRT user in MMA, Chael, Dan, Rampage to name juat a few, act as if it is their God given right to do so and refuse to see the huge disadvantage it creates for their “clean” opponents. Vitor Belfort probably believes that Jesus himself wrote his prescription and he seems very insulted every time the issue is brought up suggesting the last time that the questioner should be beaten up for doing so.

Is this self righteous entitlement to use TRT due to the fact that they, as athletes totally immersed in this small community, probably know or suspect beyond a doubt that a vast amount of the pro MMA community is using banned substances and with TRT they have just been lucky enough to find a way to do it openly?
From Mark Runza: Weed…..Pat Healy…..suspension……discuss.

Yeah, this is happening again. I guess no one should be all that surprised that your dudes got a ton of listener mail after Anderson Silva’s fake stanky leg became a totally real, totally stanky one at UFC 162.

Obviously, we couldn’t get to all that in one episode of the podcast without breaking a solemn vow up in this piece. Also, we don’t really want to take the time to answer all those questions with words, because that sounds hard. So what do we do? We say it with a GIF, brother. It’s all we really can do.

From Michael M: I’ll keep it simple. Something seemed a bit fishy at the end of Silva Weidman, and no I’m not a “••••ing idiot” as Dana White termed those who are suspect. While the big money superfights are now on hold, which would normally be motivation for such a set-up, any real chance this one was fixed?

From Nicholas Picholas: I have a new question regarding judging. If judges never get in trouble for scoring fights blindfolded, why do we always hear that scoring a 10-10 round is frowned upon? From what we’ve seen the commissions won’t do a damn thing if you score a fight 30-25 in favor of Kalib Starnes. I find it hard to believe judges will get their walking papers or be punished in some sort of manner for calling a 10-10 round.

From Cian Shine: The recent talk about fighters pay really serves as a reminder to me of just how •••• scared UFC fighters appear to be when it comes to speaking out against their employer.

The issue of fighters pay is generally only raised by fighters who don’t have any reason to fear getting on the UFC’s bad side, such as Josh Cholish, Ken Shamrock and to a lesser extent John Fitch. We recently saw a current Zuffa employee Tim Kennedy speak out about fighters pay, only to quickly turnaround and apologize for his ‘hurtful’ remarks toward Zuffa, while also giving what sounded like a Zuffa press release. What do you think it is about Zuffa that makes their athletes appear to be so afraid of speaking out against the company?

I can’t see Zuffa firing someone like Tim Kennedy over his comments as it would just lead to more negative media attention for the company and perhaps even legal issues. If anything, it seems like a way for a mid-level fighter like Kennedy to get from the media, increase their twitter followers and perhaps make them more appealing to sponsors.

From Spencer W: I know we aren’t psychologists. But why do you think people feel the need to build a conspiracy about Silva throwing the fight? Obviously they are unable to use logic, but why they do that?

From Gonzo from Peru: I was wondering if during the the UFC 162 madness you managed to catch a tweet from TIto Ortiz (Huntington Beach’s Peoples Champ of Bad Boys) that said: “Comebacks are the best” accompanied by a picture of himself flexing in front of the mirror. I guess what I am asking is, do you guys think he is actually coming back and if that’s so, are you ••••ing kidding me Tito?

From Til Breidenbach: a question from a young dad and MMA enthusiast just like yourselves. If one of your children decided to fight professionally, would you be happy about that?

From Joakim Kalantari: The Barbarian Horde is hurting today! And I blame Chad for it! I’m not sure why, though. Could you make a case for how this is all Chad’s fault?

From Great Dane: If both of you (and most of the MMA media) agree that the UFC Hall of Fame isn’t exactly a “Hall of Fame”, similar to Major League Baseball or the NFL, why does the MMA media feel compelled to continually to write about it?

From Jay Bradley: It’s all fun and games until you get knocked the •••• out pretending to do the stanky leg.

Another week, another crush of mail from you people, what with your questions and your questionable assertions and your ideological rants thinly disguised as questions. What I’m trying to say is, we love you crazy sons of bitches. Unfortunately, we don’t have time to answer all your emails with, you know, words and stuff. But that’s why God made GIFs, right?

This week’s GIF Parade touches on women’s MMA cliches, whether Salt Lake City is the suckiest city that ever sucked (spoiler alert: YES), and, of course, more “year of the superfight” nonsense. Plus some other crap. You ready? Yeah, you look ready enough.
From Dan O Mite: It seems that when the initial shock wore off from Chris Wiedman’s upset, the focus shifted almost immediately from “Oh my god did you see that ••••?!” to “hmm…i don’t know about this Wiedman guy. I’m not sure he has what it takes to sell pay per views.”

Ben even addressed it in his TMB column this week. This question just strikes me as odd, though, for two reasons: First, if you’re so worried about a guy’s ability to sell pay per views you should just go ahead and buy the damn fight…

…and second, nobody know what the hell it takes to sells pay per views. Not a goddamn one of us has any clue why some guys sell more pay per views than other guys. “Well, Danno old sport,” you say, “you need to put on exciting fights, preferably ending in knockouts, and you need a charismatic personality. That should do the trick.” Yeah, that sounds great in theory, except when you consider that the UFC’s top draw is routinely derided as being a boring fighter with a robotic personality. Anderson Silva is another guy who couldn’t charm his way out of a wet paper bag.
From Dirty Mike: How da fugg does that goober Dominick Cruz still have a goddamn belt.

How does someone who never shows up to work still parade the title of being the best in his weight class this goddamn long. Ridiculous. Shouldnt there be a time limit to defend your title? Whats-his-nutz from brazil has defend his interim title more then that putz amirite? or amirite?

Interim titles are kind of wack too. Why give one to Carlos Condit at all or Shane Carwin when all it does is ensure them an immediate title shot. I wouldnt be surprised if this has been discussed before but it still bugs me when I see that 4’9” weiner kid, smerking in the front row on some random UFC broadcast.
From Aziz Mulhim: I’d like to talk about women’s MMA for a second…I’m not a hater nor a fan, I just enjoy fights regardless of the gender but it drives me ••••ing crazy when people say things like “the women always bring it” as if being a female suddenly makes you an exciting fighter.
From Patrick Day: Between all the complaints about fighter pay and Brian Stann’s reasoning for quitting fighting largely related to his ability to support his family, how do you feel whenever someone talks about fighting to provide for their wife and kids?
From Chad Zenger: Dana White’s comments about Salt Lake City gave me the same eye rolling reaction I give when my Uncle who is a traditional martial artist calls the UFC “Ex-Convict Vs. Ex-Convict” (Don’t worry Fowlkes, I’ll get to you in a minute after Dana) Lets take a look back at what happened.

It was the first matchup of Silva Vs. Sonnen….On a Sunday. Of all states in the entire country and you pick Utah to randomly have your event on a Sunday. Anybody who knows anything knows Utah is very religious and nobody does anything on Sunday. Then after tickets don’t sell out in the first few weeks you demote the event to a fight night. This is the equivalent to telling all your friends (In bro voice) “Dude, I’m having this sick party, I’ll provide all the drinks, we’ll have a Barbecue, tons of girls and the Foo Fighters are going to be playing live!” Then a few weeks later telling everyone (in depressed bro voice) “Hey dude..so…The party is BYOB, there is only going to be Bar-S hotdogs there, all the girls bailed and the Foo Fighters cancelled….Oh and my Grandma is going to be in town and wants to meet all of you.” Everyone I talked to felt screwed over and cheated and had a sour taste in their mouth and didn’t want to go anymore.

Fowlkesy boy I thought we were tight, your comments about Utahs club scene left me sad and downtrodden. I know we may not have the hippest clubs with the most yolo swag but I have made it a hobby to travel. I have been to the clubs in Vegas a hundred times, clubs in New York, Boston, LA, San Diego, Paris, Rome and London. Yes it is cool to be in an awesome club rubbing elbows with celebrities, but once you are 5 shots deep it doesn’t matter what club you are in as long as you are with people that can have a good time.

I lose sleep at night at how crazy everyone is about MMA in Utah. We have Jeremy Horn’s gym that has connections with Matt Hughes, Rich Franklin and Jens Pulver. Also the Pit Elevated, Court McGee, Ramsay Nijem and Steven Siler are all from here. Utah is a hotbed of MMA that is for some reason flying under the radar.
From CJ Glancy: I woke up on a gorgeous and what will be a ••••ing hot Saturday contemplating buying the Invicta card… But after checking some Mma sites, I see its Pettis vs. Henderson at UFC 164… I only see Grant defending a concussion and the conspiracy of it. Why are so many Mma fans trolls?

Time and time again these sons of bitches call a farse on the reality we live in. Anderson silva got beat, we hear about dives and million dollar Weidman bets. Now grant is hurt and he is defending playoffs? What the ••••? Why is this •••• only in the ufc but discussed in terms of MLS, or the PGA?
From Evan Whitmore: “You knock a mother••••er out, you knocked him out. You get that. You get to take that home with you.” That was the wonderful Ben Fowlkes back in episode 32, in regards to Cain Velasquez’s head-to-fist action in his first fight against Junior dos Santos.

I feel like the first Velasquez vs. dos Santos fight has some important parallels to the recent Chris Weidman vs. Anderson Silva fight. The challenger was hyped to hell, and then had this surprise KO that even his fans didn’t really see coming. Two questions regarding this parallel: was Weidman’s left hook as much of a fluke as dos Santos’…

…and if Cain had to fight Antonio Silva to get the title fight, why does Anderson Silva get an immediate rematch? Does Georges St.-Pierre get a guaranteed rematch against Johny Hendricks?

From Adam Zips: So 2013 was supposed to be the year of the super-fight….

Anderson Silva KO’d by chris weidman and there goes that idea. With Jon Jones fighting Alex Gustafson and GSP fighting Hendricks, could this be the year of “the fall of the great champions”?

From Claire Hammond: As I think Chael Sonnen has suggested in the past, has Brian Stann retired to start getting organised for a Presidential campaign or something? Is there a better human being out there than Brian Stann?

Eventually this has to stop, right? And by this, I mean the odd email that floats into our inbox alleging that the Anderson Silva-Chris Weidman fight was fixed. It just can’t continue on indefinitely. We will not abide it, and there aren’t enough angry GIFs out there to convey our feelings on the matter.

There are, fortunately for all of us, plenty of other GIFs and other Listener Mail queries to match them up with. So let’s get on with it, and woe be unto the mother••••er who sends us a fight-fixing question after this day.

From Jon Lee: Isn’t this whole Anderson putting his hands down thing the ULTIMATE in Monday morning Quarterbacking? When Silva puts his hands down against EVERY other fighter before smashing them, we give him massive god like props and when he finally gets caught we act like he’s embarrassing the sport and himself and his own Brazilians boo’d him. I guess I’m asking why do we as MMA fans do that?

From Dan O: I’ve got an idea for bonus structures in the UFC and I want you guys to tell me how brilliant I am for thinking of it (or •••• on it, lets be honest, you will probably •••• on it).

So it starts off with everyone who finishes his opponent gets a bonus of 20,000 dollars. KO of the night and Submission of the night are gone, but Fight of the Night stays and is worth 20k to each guy. So if an event has ten fights, Dana sets aside 240,000 dollars for bonuses. Since it is rare that all fights end in a finish, any unused bonus money goes back in the kitty, so to speak. For example, if only one fight ends in decision, that 20k gets distributed evenly among the next event so now the bonuses are worth 22k apiece.

If you get 3 or 4 events in a row where half the fights go to decision that bonus starts to get up near 40 grand and everybody starts throwing caution to the wind to go for a finish. Just imagine Dana and Joe screaming at each other at the end of the FX prelims about how crazy the pay per view will be because everyone that finishes gets a forty or fifty thousand dollar check and then try telling me this isn’t a great idea.

From Mauro Pedrosa: Wouldn’t a fight between Nick Diaz and Michael Bisping be awesome?

From Corey Whichard: As someone who follows MMA very closely, I make it a point to avoid all MMA-themed movies. I don’t even watch mainstream movies starring MMA fighters (e.g., The A-Team, Haywire, The Expendables), not merely because all of these movies look ••••ing terrible, but because as a general rule professional cage-fighters are uniformly god-awful at acting.

I’m not talking about expecting decent or even okay acting–most of these guys can’t help but ruin whatever scene they momentarily appear in, and as a fan of their sport I literally feel embarrassed for them. I even feel mildly ashamed when I come across the movie cover for what I can only (regretfully) describe as an “MMA movie,” as they all tend to look like advertisements for some bizarre mixture of gangster rap and violent gay porn.

Do you guys think that MMA fighters-turned-actors, who themselves must watch movies with talented actors, are actually under the impression that they can act? Is it just a way to make a quick buck? Do they have any idea how much they suck?

From Curt Heinrichs: With Anderson Silva losing to Weidman, a certain MMA personality (whose Twitter handle suggests he has good seats and his name is Brian) has been suggesting that certain fights are “works” in the lingo of professional wrestling. While I doubt that anyone in the UFC would take a dive, I was wondering your thoughts on the matter. Aside from a few known examples, do you feel that there are some fights that are planned out in advance, or is this guy just trolling his followers?

From Ben Hoefstetter: Do you guys find it odd that UFC 163 is “Aldo vs. KOREAN ZOMBIE”? He has a real name, and one that is not even that difficult for Westerners to pronounce.

Did the UFC just not want to spend the time to figure out whether “Jung” or “Chang-Sung” is his surname, or are they just banking on the hope that those elusive casual fans remember an awesome fight from 2010 featuring a dude from Korea who just kept moving forward? Also at the time of writing this message, two fighters on the main card of UFC 163 do not have wikipedia pages.

From Jeremy Doughty: my question is regarding belt procedure. I have always assumed that when a title reign comes to an end the former champ actually turns in the belt and it is given to the new champ. Then I watch the Countdown shows and see former champs with a slew of belts on their mantle and am left wondering if they actually keep the belt, do they have to purchase it, or are these just replicas. Getting to The root of my question, is Cain Velasquez holding the same belt Tim Silvia slept with, and at the end of the day what is that shiny gold bitch worth.

From Joakim Kalatanri: You guys have been of CME fame for a while now and I wonder; how does it feel that your fans likely, take more seriously and pay more attention to what you say more than probably you do.

This is not veiled criticism of the podcast. I know you don’t just go out there and say ••••, just to be saying stuff (besides when you do, but you get my point). I can imagine that you are both used to fan reaction to your work, due to your profession. At the same time though, the podcast medium does not allow you to be as deliberate and precise as when you’re writing. It kind of forces you to think a loud which may lead to less than optimal phrasing and positions. What’s your experience of idiots like myself reminding you about •••• that you may or may not have said/meant weeks and month later?

While this week’s podcast received mail from someone who may or may not have been a character from the 1993 film “Menace II Society,” we also got a bunch of questions from you other sons of bitches that we simply didn’t have the time (or, let’s face it, desire) to answer. But that’s where the magic of the animated GIF comes in.

Take it away, GIFs.

From Steven Merriman: This past Saturday I had the dubious pleasure of watching Rory MacDonald jab his way to a unanimous, if unsatisfying victory. It’s hard to imagine a GSP vs. Rory fight as anything other as tedious. Which leads me to my question: True or False: Johnny Hendricks defeating George St-Pierre is the best thing that could happen to the Welterweight division.

From Seth Remington: Is it time to start drug testing the judges of these events before and after an MMA event? Seriously, someone had to be smoking crack to get those scores. Two separate split decision fights with 30-27s for each fighter? And what about poor Timmy Means who was robbed of a decision? I know it is like a broken record but when is the MMA world gonna get some competent judges? Aaron Riley just retired, give that man a job as a judge!

From Ronda’s Wart: Demetrious Johnson is a superior fighter to GSP in every way.

Namely: 1. MUCH more dynamic/exciting. 2. Arguably more technical and effective in every aspect of MMA, including wrestling. 3. Looks for and gets a finish when the decision is already in the bag, rather than looking for the safest way to coast to the final bell. 4. Is already looking for (literally) bigger challenges in the weight class above. How many years has GSP spent dominating welterweights and finding excuses not to even dip his toe in the pool at middleweight?? and 5. If Johnson wanted to build and protect a “legacy” as a dominant champion for years to come, getting rich and boring us to tears, he very likely could. Apparently he is more ambitious than that. Discuss!

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From Kent Carter: Michael Chandler just signed an 8 fight deal with Bellator, pretty much guaranteeing he will not fight a top ten ranked fighter while he is in his prime. If he’s not interested in fighting the best, I’m not interested in watching him fight. Is this the extremely career limiting move that I seem to think it is?

From Carl Kennedy: So apparently, in regards to the bare knuckle boxing thing, the reason it is technically “bare knuckle” is because there is a slit cut in the top of the gloves that exposes the knuckles. I am really not sure if/how they are wrapping the hands. So yeah………. that is happening. What do you think? Worse than X-arm?

From Joakim Kalantari: I thought to offer you some perspective on all of your collective complaining about “too many cards” and “watered down product” and “UFC excessively asking its fans for their time.”

I live in Sweden, so it goes without saying that my experience is limited to this region alone. First of all; to follow the UFC live you have stay up all night. Prelims start around midnight and main card normally commences around 4 am Sunday morning.

Secondly, every thing; Facebook prelims, FX/Fuel prelims and main card is available trough UFC.tv i.e. online stream. Thirdly, every fight card costs about USD 30. This means that all these halv-••••ty/halv-decent “free cards” that you are hard pressed to spend time to watch live, let alone spend money on, costs us 30 bucks a pop. To cap it all off, if there’s a problem with the stream, which granted happens seldom but when it happens it does so at the most inopportune moments (e.g. main event of Silva/Weidman), the UFC’s response is total deafening silence. No refunds, no apologies, no empty promises about “making it up to the fans” by Dana White – nothing.

Additionally, you best check your tone when you email the customer support to complain because the only response you’ll liable to receive is a thinly veiled threat of getting your account blocked. And then where will you be? You’d be forced to examine the void that you’ve spent years and thousands of dollars to create instead of any thing that would pass for a social life.

Just like my mom used to bring up “starving kids” anytime I did not like the dinner that was offered, maybe you should consider us Swedes next time you complain about a ••••ty Fuel/FX/Fox card. I mean free healthcare and college education, low infant mortality rates, high life expectancy, clean air and water and low crime rates and all are all good and well; but I had to pay for the •••• we all watched yesterday evening (or in my case previously this morning)

From Brady Carlson: What is the single greatest move every pulled off in an MMA fight? Is it the Showtime kick, Edson Barboza’s spinning heel kick, Anderson Silva’s front kick to the face, what?

From Walter Pinkman: Is there any other sports fan as fickle as the mma fan? Why does groupthink exist so pervasively in this sport? Is there any sport where current fans make it harder for new fans to start enjoying the same sport? Three questions that have continued to arise in my life as it becomes harder and harder to justify my enjoyment of the sport to outsiders and occasionally myself.

From Perry Bergson: If Fighter A has a technique working that his opponent, Fighter B, can’t deal with, does he really have an obligation to move to other things to please the fans? Doesn’t Fighter B have to find a way to deal with the jab or wrestling or leg kicks or whatever is beating him? Isn’t winning all that ultimately matters, regardless of the route taken to get there?

From Mazz M: Let’s just imagine that the fabled Roy Jones Jr. vs Quinton Rampage jackson fight happens. They have to get KIMBO SLICE in the undercard (read: co-main event) right?

We knew this was coming. The moment Tito Ortiz spat in the face of the Eminem Curse while making his entrance at last week’s Bellator event to announce his upcoming pay-per-view bout with “Rampage” Jackson, we knew we were going to get buried by emails from you people. What we didn’t figure on was how weirdly kind of diverse in scope they would be. So, I guess, good job on that? Or maybe not?

Ah, screw it. We’ll let the GIFs speak for us.

From Kevin S: At first glance Jackson vs Ortiz seems like a terrible PPV headliner since they’ve both lost three in a row, but when I think about it, it might be a great idea.

When Affliction put on a PPV, they went with Emelianenko vs Sylvia. It was a fight with the best heavyweight of all time and was worth watching. The UFC counter-programmed it. Here’s where the genius of Jackson vs Ortiz comes in.

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It’s a horrible fight that has no implications for light-heavyweight. The UFC isn’t going to even bother with throwing together a fight card to counter-program it. Plus, it will come with the free press for the next few months generated by Dana mocking and criticizing “Viacom MMA” for promoting this fight. All they have to do now is convince people to actually pay for this event. That part they may not have thought through so much.

From Brian Mills: So, I just read that Bellator will be having Tito VS. Rampage as the headliner of their first PPV. Who the •••• wants to see that?!

Bjorn was adamant about not taking on UFC cast offs, yet this seems to go against all of that. Bellator is quickly becoming a UFC retirement home. Is this Viacom’s doing? And how much of this sad •••• can Bellator get away with before everyone tunes out for good?

From Joakim Kalantari: I find it difficult to care about the November 2 Bellator PPV main event Jackson v Ortiz, in and of itself. So I have a three part question about which outcome would be sadder.

Bellator failing or succeeding in actually putting on a ppv card headlined by Rampage and Tito? Rampage succeeding or failing at defeating Tito? MMA media and fans paying this fight attention as a legitimate contest or just a sad display of what happens to washouts in fighting sports in general?

From Warren M: Yea, Rampage vs Tito as a main event on a ppv at this point is kinda hilariously absurd and the annihilation of Rickels, Noe and that russian dude were totally expected, but when was the last time Bellator had buzz like this after an event? Do u guys think it will translate to better numbers and a successful ppv?

From Mike Moore: in light of this “earth-shattering” announcement about Bellator’s first PPV event, what do you think of this sliver lining? Perhaps this inevitably worthless event ends up proving once and for all that the Bellator “match” is nowhere near what they claim it is, thus giving Alvarez the evidence he needs to end his fight with them and move on to the UFC. Thoughts?

From Kent Carter: So Tito Ortiz is fighting in Bellator. We’re never going to see Cyborg fight in the UFC, are we?

Machida has made a ufc career out of ignoring fan reactions to his “technical” (or just plain boring) fights. Do you lads find it ironic that now he tries to rally fan support, when he has never seemed to be interested before?

From Andreas Northman: I’ve been an MMA-fan since about 2005 and I’m norwegian, born and raised. MMA in Norway is still only just growing, despite relativly unknown (in Norway) local luminaries like Joakim Hellboy Hansen and John Olav Einemo. As the sport starts picking up pace in my hometown Bergen on the west coast I start to have more and more conversations with people who regard themselves as budding MMA fans, and the things they very often start the conversation with is whether or not I myself train MMA.

The second thing they often talk about is whether or not I have been in a fight in my lifetime, and they quickly proceed to talk about the time they got slapped or ended up in a fight in their youth. My question is: did any of this kind of weird •••• happen to you guys when the sport was sprawling in the US, or is this some kind of Scandinavian/Norwegian thing?

From Tobias Finazzi: I know Herb Dean is considered by many the best MMA referee in the business, but after watching him let Cub Swanson tee off on an unconscious Dennis Siver for what felt like minutes at UFC 162, I once again had to yell a big Are-You-••••ing-Kidding-Me at the TV screen this weekend.

Tell me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it maybe worth interrupting the fight and, just maybe, have a medical professional take a look at the situation if someone HAS TO ••••ING TRY AND RELOCATE THEIR OWN SHOULDER IN THE MIDDLE OF A CAGEFIGHT? Maybe Herb Dean took the term ‘Zombie’ a little bit too seriously? I can’t even begin to imagine the public outrage that would have ensued if it had been Steve Mazzagatti in there. Just saying.

You know what the best part is about receiving a weekly deluge of mail from our listeners? I mean, aside from reading the first few words of each one, then passing out from too much cold medicine, then waking up with Twizzlers wrappers stuck to our faces, then saying ‘•••• it’ and going out to race go-karts?

It’s that even when they’re crazy and weird, they’re rarely boring. So thanks for that. Now enjoy these GIFs while we go on a quick Twizzlers run.

From Luke Rodgers: What are your thoughts on kids watchin MMA?

For the past 12 months I’ve been watching the UFC with my daughter who’s now 15 months old. This last week she pushed a boy over at nursery and started laughing.

My wife said that she can no longer watch MMA with me.

Do you think children watching MMA would influence them to be more violent? I watched wwe (WWF in those days) as a youngster and it didn’t really influence me to start clotheslining people.

From Handsome Pat Fanin: Am I the only one tired of hearing what the UFC should be doing? “Latin America” this, “low ratings” that, hit steve Mazzagatti with a wiffleball bat.

I feel as though since the UFC is viewed as a new organization(which it really isn’t) and MMA is viewed a new sport(only relatively), it gives the fans and media types unjustified confidence that they know how to grow the sport/organization.

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From Ismeal Batres: How do you think Dana White will take the news if Ronda Rousey actually sticks around for two years more??

I’m positive that right now he’s thinking she’s only saying that as of now, but she’ll stick around when she starts making that Anderson Silva money.

Thing Is, I actually believe her.

With all this movie stuff coming in and all the magazine covers she’s doing; I can see why she doesn’t want to get punched the face for several years to come. So my question is, how do you think Dana White will take the news and do you see the women’s division being as popular or if it’ll even stay?

From Jeremy Murphy: I was on the UFC’s website today, and noticed that Sean Sherk is still listed as a U.F.C lightweight even though he hasn’t fought since September of 2010 (Three Years ago).

Also, at 36-4-1 Sherk has a better Record that both Fedor Emelianenko and Anderson Silva (weird).

Will he actually return to the UFC after three years away from the sport? How will he do?

From Mark German: Hey guys, I was hoping you could answer a question regarding the division between MMA news and events in the personal lives of fighters.

I recently received some disturbing information that alleges some misconduct in the life of a UFC fighter.

My initial thought was, “Well, I have to tell someone in the media because this is morally wrong and people should know this fighter’s true character!”

But the news is only loosely related to MMA in general (i.e. more TMZ material than anything else).

My question then is where do journalists such as yourselves draw the line between covering the people in and around the cage and the events that happen away from it? Should fans even act as whistleblowers or just mind their own business?

From Danny Downes: My name is Danny Boy Downes. You may remember me from my triumph against Chinese expansion at WEC 53 and my upcoming book, “Mixed Martial Misogyny: The Ben Fowlkes Story.”

With regards to your discussion about welterweight champion Ben Askren, I must take umbrage with the “alleged” Ben FOWLkes.

It is not surprising to be disappointed with MMA journalism normally, but Fowlkes has taken it to another level.

You wrote off Askren’s ability to compete in the UFC without much consideration and no evidence.

Please explain why an Olympic wrestler in one of the best training camps in the country could not hold his own against the other 170 lb fighters in the UFC. Is the reason for your severely off-base assessment simple ignorance, or do USA Today writers follow the same fact checking procedures as FOX News? AYFKM

From Joakim Kalantari: You’re all quick to ridicule Tito for grasping at straws to stay in the game, but, who would fight for “the freedom of mixed martial arts,” if he was to call it quits?! I’ll tell me how you’ve feel right then!

Every once in a while we here at the CME podcast get some listener emails that cause us to legit LOL. We’re not proud of that, but you rascals should be. Know that even if we didn’t find time to talk about your nonsense on the show, it doesn’t mean we didn’t appreciate the time and effort you put into said nonsense.

Here, let us appreciate you with these GIFs.

From Travis Bickle: I recently heard an interview with the pornstar who was in the Farah Abraham sextape and he said it has made a million dollars.

Upon hearing this, I had the same thought I always do about UFC pay-per-views: How is it possible that these make any money when they’re so easily downloaded online?

With the UFC’s deal with Fox and the next generation of fans who don’t pay for anything they can get for free online, do you guys see a day when the UFC does away with pay-per-views altogether?

From Dan O.: I’m a little confused about something and I was wondering if you two could help clear things up for me.

You see, I happened to turn the channel to TNA wrestling right as Rampage and Tito came running down the ramp together, so of course I had to see what the deal was. I assumed they were about to form the greatest tag team duo since Shawn Michaels and Marty Jannetty, but then Tito, out of nowhere, hits Rampage in the back of the head with a ball-peen hammer.

A BALL-••••IN-PEEN HAMMER!

Now, assuming Rampage doesn’t have a cracked skull, at the very least we have a well documented severe concussion just a few months before their scheduled fight.

Is the athletic commission at whatever Indian reservation they are hosting this pay per view going to step in a give rampage a medical suspension for this? Do Indian reservations even have commissions? Is Indian reservation still the proper nomenclature?

From Great Dane: Dana white just said the upcoming season of The Ultimate Fighter is the best season ever!!!!

Seriously though, we don’t have any reason to actually believe him, right? What could actually make this the best season ever? A rhino breaks into the gym and Rhonda Rousey breaks off it’s horn via armbar? (Technically it would be a “horn-bar”, I guess.)

If the UFC was to do away with the TUF series, what is the best way to get an influx of talent and introduce them to the viewer? Do we have to hope they can fight their way off the Facebook or unaired prelim fights so to gain some name recognition? Could it be argued that TUF is good for the fighters, as it allows them to procure sponsorship contracts that they might not otherwise be privy to?

Is it better to have more of the Fox Sports 1 and 2 cards to at least let these guys get on TV and potentially earn some money for all their hardwork? Then we have to listen to more complaints from Old-Man Dundas about all the fights he has to watch.

Ultimately, what’s the best answer to find and promote the new talent?

From Corey Whichard: At the end of round one in Manvel “Lil’ Joe Rogan” Gamburyan and Cole Miller, Miller struck Manny with a couple elbows to the top of the head. Immediately afterward, the round ended and Manny sat there clutching the back of his head while Cole Miller politely stood next to him with his hand on Manny’s shoulder.

This lasted at least ten seconds. It was like something out of a David Lynch movie. Where does this rank on your list of most surreal in-cage MMA moments?

I understand that there is some crossover with a few fighters becoming wrestlers and wrestlers becoming fighters, but reading commentary or play by play on a mma website about some ex fighters falling down on purpose for the entertainment of idiots absolutely drives me crazy.

If you enjoy that type of entertainment and you are an idiot, then have at it, I hear Dave Meltzer does a cute little thing for the kids that still watch WWE.

From James Mackintosh: Travis Browne looked to be “in the best shape of his career” and with a bit of help from mike dolce (the only nutritionist any of us can name) do you think he could make 205?

I think he has the skill set to cause jones problems but Cain or JDS would destroy him.