Sunday, May 24, 2009

My cell phone rings at 12:09 a.m. on this Sunday morning, waking me from a dead sleep. I recognize the caller ID number, which is a bad sign already. It's Mr. Bozohusband. He and his wife are notorious for pointless phone calls.

Dr. Grumpy: "This is Dr. Grumpy."

Mr. Bozohusband: "Hi, I have a question about my wife's medications."

Dr. Grumpy: "What's up?"

Mr. Bozohusband: "She had dental surgery 2 days ago, and the dentist gave her Vicodin. Is it safe for her to take?"

Dr. Grumpy: "Hasn't she taken Vicodin for years for her back pain? She's never had any problems with it before."

Mr. Bozohusband: "No, she hasn't. But this is for her dental surgery, not her back pain."

Geez Dr. Grumpy, that's a legit question - just because the vicodin worked for her back pain doesn't mean its going to work for her dental pain unless she gets your permission...at midnight. *headdesk*

I stumbled across your blog and want to tell you that I am hooked. No, I am not a doctor, I am a 55 year old widow who has to waitress for a living, but I do believe that you have some of my customers for your patients!!! lolGod bless, carlene

Ah yes, we could fill several volumes with these kinds of questions, couldn't we! Someone called me the other day with a question on taking her medication with food. "Now, should I take it JUST before I eat, after I've started to eat, or after I'm finished eating?"Well, at least it wasn't midnight...

I work in a pharmacy. The other day a woman came up and dropped a script off for vicodin. After running it we noticed it was rejected for being to soon. When we told her she couldnt get it because she filled vicodin the day before and should have a 30 day supply, she responded with "But that one was for my back, this is for my teeth"....yes ma'am, you take one pill for each pain you experience.

Welcome to my whining!

This blog is entirely for entertainment purposes. All posts about patients may be fictional, or be my experience, or were submitted by a reader, or any combination of the above. Factual statements may or may not be accurate.

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