welcome to the place where funny and interesting things are posted by the most articulate and e-handsome son of a bitch none of you have ever met.

Yeah...I'm just gonna put things I find of interest in here, typically they'll be humorous to some extent. Maybe not. idk. Maybe we'll have different types of humor. But laugh anyway...life is better that way.

It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope. At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?" "Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you." He said, "Fuck him, give him a dollar." The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

If you think life is bad... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. It takes 4 minutes to get hard. Only 2 minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys. But worst of all...The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother. So cheer up... Your life ain't that bad!

If you think life is bad... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. It takes 4 minutes to get hard. Only 2 minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys. But worst of all...The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother. So cheer up... Your life ain't that bad!

I JUST heard this joke the other day in a movie!! I loved it!!

__________________"I like my coffee like my men- strong and keeps me up all night!"

"You can sleep with a blond, you can sleep with a brunette, but you will NEVER get any sleep with a red head!"

One day Little Johnny went walking around to check out his
surroundings and found a farmer selling chickens. Little Johnny went
over to the farmer to see how much he was selling them for. The
farmer asked him if he wanted a male or a female. Little Johnny asked
for both. So the farmer said, "Here you go, one cock and one pullet."

Little Johnny got confused, and asked him what he meant. The farmer
said, "A cock is a male chicken and a pullet is a female chicken."

Little Johnny said, "Oh," and went on his way with two chickens one
under each arm. A bit further down the road he saw a donkey for sale.

He went to the man who was selling it to find out how much it was.
The man said, "The ass is 15 dollars." Little Johnny replied, "No, I
want the donkey out side in your yard." The man just said, "That's an
ass."

Little Johnny, new to these terms, just said, "Oh," and bought the
donkey. As he was leaving the man yelled out, "Wait, the ass gets a
bit stubborn about going over hills, so you have to scratch him
behind the ears to get him going again."

So Little Johnny is going back home and the donkey stops dead in its
tracks and he can't get it to move. He can't scratch its ear because
he would have to drop one of the chickens and it would run away. So
Little Johnny starts to fuss and yell at the donkey. While he is
doing this a beautiful woman walks up and asks him if he needs help.

Little Johnny thinks, hey, why don't I try to impress this beautiful
woman by using my new terms that I learned today. So Little Johnny
turns to the woman and says, "Yeah, could you hold my cock and pullet
while I scratch my ass?"