A real-life D/s couple, together for more than ten years, discuss what it's like to live the "lifestyle" in real life, long term, from both points of view. Techniques, interactions, product reviews and events will be featured, as well as essays on life as we know it.

Tuesday, 14 June 2011

Technique Tuesday: Bastinado

Bastinado, also known as falanga and falaka, is the art of whipping the bottoms of pretty, vulnerable, innocent little feets. Or at least that's what I call my feet when I'm trying to hide them, sole-to-sole, against a threatening cane. "Poor innocent feets!"

The truth is, I just love it.

I have this thing about not liking feet in general. I think they're kind of icky. I hate having people touch mine, especially strangers. I don't even like people looking at mine unless they are safely tucked away in socks. I just don't think of them as a pretty part, and the idea of a foot fetish in general makes me very confused. To me, it might as well be an elbow fetish; I just don't get it. Then again, everyone's kink is different.

Then I wound up with this guy who gives amazing foot massages. He explained to me the ways in which he'd learned to get women all worked up... through their feet. I didn't think it was possible. I mean feet? Feet? Sexy times with feet? No way.

It took a long time for me to be able to relax enough to let him touch them, let alone massage them. My feet are very sensitive and ticklish, and I hate being tickled (See here for reference!), so it took some real trust to let him have his way with them without protest, squealing, and struggling to get away. When I did? Oh it was a complete revelation. And while at times I'm still shy about my feet, and have a tendency to tuck them beneath myself, sit on them, hide them under pets or pillows or whatever else is handy when he reaches for them... I'm aware that there's much more to feet than meets the eye.

I've mentioned before how much I adore the videos from Hogtied, and that's where my curiosity about bastinado was piqued. If massaging my feet was awesome, and hit all these erogenous spots, what would happen with caning of the feet? I brought it up tentatively, shyly, uncertainly, and it gave the Masterly one kind of an evil glint in his eyes. He likes it, I think, when I am interested in trying something that also has me really freaked out. He enjoys vulnerability and fear on display.

I can't remember when we first tried it, but it was years ago and with our previous acrylic cane. We moved on to floggers, slappers, wooden spoons, and all kinds of punishment for those poor innocent feets. And what I learned is, those same erogenous zones that got so stimulated from his massaging hands were even more stimulated with the pain of a beating. It pushed all of my buttons, including, incidentally, my light interest in humiliation, because I find having my feet at his mercy both humbling and humiliating. I'm not sure why, it's likely because it's a part of me that I feel so driven to keep hidden, the way most people would feel about displaying a blemish that made them self-conscious. And my display of pleasure and arousal from it feeds that humiliation even more, of course.

If you've never tried bastinado, it's worth a try (especially for feet-o-phobes!). Find someone experienced with light cane work and start slowly. Experiment with what feels best to you and what you can't stand. The goal here isn't to raise huge welts - unless you don't have to do any walking for a while, in which case, go nuts -it's a great way to force immobilization/crawling on someone! Try light rhythmic strokes to start, and figure out where the nerves that push your buttons are (for me, it's right in the center of the arch of my foot, as well as the outer ball of the foot near the pinkie toe). Find out where it really bothers you (right on the center flat of my heel is a rough spot for me, right where the bone is -owowow), and figure out what makes it tick for you. It's worth experimenting with. If you don't have a cane, try a wooden spoon. And have fun with it!