See, just because I promised to only wish for said cartoon anvil to land on your head if you took the closer job this season, it doesn't mean I can't hold you accountable when you blow an extra-innings game for the Sox, like you did last night.

Seriously, Joel, think of it. You headed this week with the Sox to Seattle, the town that laughed at you on the way out. You come in to the game last night with it tied in the 11th inning. All you have to do is hold down the fort, and let the Sox bats wear down a depleted Mariners bullpen.

And then what do you do? You got one measly out, then promptly gave Ichiro Suzuki, one of the fastest players in the Major Leagues, a free pass. Stellar idea. Then followed it up by allowing a double to Jose Lopez, scoring Ichiro and ending the ballgame.

Two batters. One run. Eleven innings worth of work and determination down the drain.

What's that? You feel bad, but you blame Ramirez for not tracking that ball down? That's horse puckey, Pineiro! That ball nearly carried all the way out of the park, and it was a long way away from any outfielder, including Manny. Take the heat, insteading of hiding behind that ridiculous goatee!

Alright. Alright. I'm sorried I yelled. I hope you can understand my frustration, though, and clean up your act. It'd be a shame to see something that heavy land on your noggin.