Mission Impossible: Fallout has such a title because Fallout relates to nuclear weapons, and with three plutonium warheads out there – and in the hands of a gang called The Apostles – they could be set off anywhere at any time with devastating consequences and, so, must be stopped. That’s the mission that Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) must carry out, as long as he chooses to accept it. And if he didn’t, then what would happen? These messages self-destruct after five seconds, so whoever keeps sending them to him would have to make a new one. And they’re probably not cheap.

And if he *does* accept it, what’s his prize? He certainly don’t seem a rich man, given how he’s still living in a squalid flat as the sixth film begins…

I stopped making too many notes early on, since like a lot of films of this sort, I’d just be listing the cities to which they travel. Yes, there’s a lot of globe-trotting, and when they head to Paris, to a venue that seems to have some sort of catwalk present even though no models are walking down it, I started getting pangs back to Hitman’s opening Paris level, “The Showstopper”.

With no Jeremy Renner, because he was busy with the 2019 Avengers movie, there’s Henry Cavill to make up the IMF numbers as August Walker. Cavill sports a big moustache, and this was the film where he was contractually bound NOT to shave it off, and so when going back to reshoots on Justice League (below), it had to be CGI’d out. I didn’t even know that when I saw it, so didn’t spot anything, but some DC fans got antsy about it and it became a meme for a while.

Quite why he *needed* that moustache, I have no idea.

Superman must-dash! Oh, just grin and bear it!

Writer/director Christopher McQuarrie delivered the goods big-time in No.5, but here, he lets some ‘inbetween’ scenes run on far too long, and then you stop caring about what little plot there is. This also feels more like Rogue Nation Part 2 than a new film, and with an extra 20 minutes added, and without as much effort put into it. Bringing Rebecca Ferguson back into the film, as Ilsa, just makes Ethan get a stirring in his loins again, and when that happens – because “we have a past”, the film stalls to a stop.

Similarly, this also has connections with the last movie, as one of the main baddies is the return of Solomon Lane (gruff-voiced Sean Harris, who I thought was in Skyscraper, but you can see why by reading that review), who was taken into custody by the IMF. So, does he escape in this one? Well, you’ll have to watch it to find out, because that’s how films work.

In fact, given that part of the film is set in Paris, I could say you feel a case of deja vu… (ha, ha, ha… no, you shut up!)

There’s not as much humour in this one, which shows, and is a great shame. As much as I get tired of Simon Pegg in big Hollywood movies, he made a decent contributing job to the script Star Trek Beyond. Hence, why he couldn’t be utilised here, I don’t know. Then again, McQuarrie made a great fist of that last film, so how did he let things slip?

For this scene, they missed their chance to replay The Dixie Cups’ Iko Iko (below),
as used in the opening credits ofMission Impossible II!

While there’s occasional jokes and asides, all too often, Cruise & co are just going through the motions. It does lead to a great finale, but… it REALLY shouldn’t take so long to get there. They should also bear in mind that when it’s a 12-certificate movie and so destined to appeal to a wide family audience, kids would get bored after a fair amount of time.

And aside from that climax, I didn’t feel like we saw any BIG set pieces, such as the plane opener in Rogue Nation.

We’re then left with what feels like a disconnected pile of orchestrated stunts which don’t really link up (apart from having lots of running about inbetween), while the film gets far too twisty-turny for its own good – with seemingly everyone having secrets that they just can’t tell each other (so much for teamwork!), as well as a little ‘Carry On Mission Impossible‘. And who’s the mysterious John Lark?

If you’re the kind of person who could do with paying a visit to point percy at the porcelain, then – and without giving spoilers – around halfway through Ethan and Ilsa have a chat for about 3 minutes. You can nip to the loo right then and miss NOTHING. Given the other slow patches, they detract from the excitement and make the overall experience fairly flat for the most part.

“I didn’t get it at Tesco’s, okay?!”

So, will we see Mission Impossible 7? This one will make a ton of money, so the numbers will crunch right, but Cruise is getting on, and with a slightly puffy face occasionally, which could be Botox… maybe. He also suffered an injury when making a jump across the rooftops – fracturing his ankle in the process and leading to the filming being held up for 7 weeks, as he insists on doing his own stunts, so would he risk that again?

Oh, I nearly forgot – cast-wise, Alec Baldwin has his usual dramatic delivery. I often get comments on these videos saying I look like him. Well, if I had half his cash I’d be happy…

I saw this film in 2D, which is how all of the previous ones were filmed, and in fact, this one was too, but… Paramount have, in their infinite wisdom, decided to create a 3D master and I can’t see the point. All of the action scenes revolve around fast-cutting, so in 3D, your eyes won’t lock onto the perspective properly before the angle or camera shot changes.

I love 3D when it’s done right, but here, it won’t be…. because you first actually have to FILM it in 3D!

For two cinemas close to me, Odeon’s IMAX showings at the Trafford Centre are in 3D, whereas Vue’s Manchester Printworks IMAX screenings are a mixture of 2D and 3D. Still, it doesn’t NEED an IMAX screen, and in a week’s time those will be taken up by Ant-Man and the Wasp, anyway.

According to IMDB, some scenes are opened up from 2.39:1 to 1.90:1. I expect these include the use of helicopters in the final scene as I saw a picture, beforehand, which was shows one scene that was shot with a 360-degree camera. I can imagine that looks good with the screen filled. Given that some cinemas have 1.85:1 screens, the IMAX prints should be issued to those, too, while 2.39:1 screens can have the film shown in that ratio.

Oh, and there’s nothing after the credits, so if you didn’t use the toilet when I said it was safe to do so, you’ll miss nothing during those. I still stay for the credits, even though the dicks at Vue’s Head Office still insist the lights are ramped up to nuclear-bright levels!

And now some thoughts about the ending which I will hide behind a spoiler header, but they ARE SPOILERS! So do not read if you haven’t yet seen it and don’t want to know in advance.

One thing that would’ve been interesting is that if, when the countdown reached zero, the explosion *had* taken place like we were led to believe, before we saw Cruise with that bit between his teeth.

Given that this is the 6th film, and that it just feels like No.5 Part 2, it would’ve been an interesting way to ‘clean house’ and take Hunt back to the start again, and all alone, and having to find a new team, or simply retiring.

It could’ve been like the end of the first film, with him planning to do just that, but then receiving another mission right at the end.