Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Purple vs. Yellow (My Abercrombie Rant)

“Hi, my friend has these amazing pair of jeans and she said
she got them here.But I don’t see the
purple person section.Could you help
me?”

“You don’t see a purple person section because we don’t sell
clothes for purple people.”

“Oh, that’s weird.Ok.Well…can I ask why not?”

“Isn’t it obvious?Purple people are not cool.Only
yellow people are cool.”

“Says who?”

“Everyone. Only yellow people can be popular and have
friends.”

“Well I’m clearly purple and I’m actually very popular at my
school.I have lots of friends…I have a
lot of yellow friends too.”

“That can’t be.Look
around you.See all the pictures of
yellow people having fun and being beautiful?Clearly they are the cool, popular kids.You are way too purple to be
cool.”

“Well I’m a nice person, a good friend.I have a great sense of humor and I love to
do all the fun, cool things that the yellow kids do.”

“I can’t believe yellow people hang out with you.Don’t worry, soon all the yellow kids will
get the message that they should only be hanging out with other yellow
kids.We’ll make sure of that.Then the purple kids can go back to hating
themselves and feeling badly about the way they look.”

“I don’t think you’re very nice.”

“I don’t care.Just look
how yellow I am…how beautiful I
am.You should try doing something about
how purple you are.There are ways you
can try to be more yellow, you know.”

“It would take something really drastic to make me more
yellow.It might be dangerous and
unsafe.”

“So?You’d be yellow
at the end of it.That’s the goal right?”

Ok, do you get the picture yet?This post is clearly about the gigantic dickhead
CEO of Abercrombie & Fitch.He’s
been quoted as saying things such as:

“That’s why we hire good-looking people in our stores.
Because good-looking people attract other good-looking people, and we want to
market to cool, good-looking people. We don’t market to anyone other than
that,”

And:

“In every school
there are the cool and popular kids, and then there are the not-so-cool kids,”
he told the site. “Candidly, we go after the cool kids. We go after the
attractive all-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot
of people don’t belong [in our clothes], and they can’t belong. Are we
exclusionary? Absolutely."

Ok, so you don’t want to sell above a size 10 in women’s
clothes.Fine.It’s your business, do what you want.There are plenty of specialty stores out that
that cater to a certain clientele.And that’s
not wrong.That’s not what I take issue
with.

I take issue with the reasoning.The idea that a young girl cannot possibly be
cool, popular and attractive if they wear a larger size.

Being beautiful has NOTHING TO DO WITH SIZE!

I can’t shop in the tall section of any store.But that’s because I’m not tall, not because
I’m not cool.

This guy’s quotes make me angry.They make me incensed.They make me want to throw something…preferably
at his face.Who the hell are you to
tell society what is beautiful and cool?Who the hell are you to look at a teenage girl who is already desperate
to fit in and tell her that she can’t, she simply CAN NOT, because she wears a
size 12.

What about the athletic girl who has muscles and an actual
shape to her body? (Holla to all my fellow ex gymnasts who rock the strong
quads and broad shoulders!) If you’re anything other than a stick figure you
have no place in society?This is the
message we’re sending our children?

And it’s not just girls…guys are affected by the idea that
they have to ultra-muscular and fit to be attractive.I don’t want boys obsessed with bulking up any more than I
want girls obsessed with being thin.

Your natural body shape and size is out of your
control.What IS in your control is how
you treat your body.Be healthy, young
people.There are some natural size 16s
who eat well, exercise and take care of their bodies…and will never be any
smaller due to genetics.There are also
some natural size zeros who will always be thin.And that’s great.Rock your body!

Take the emphasis off looks and put it where it belongs…on
being healthy and happy in the skin you’re in.

You, Mr. Asshole Fuck Face CEO, are what’s wrong with this
country.You are gross.You are a predator…you are preying on the
weaknesses and insecurities of an already unbelievably emotionally fragile
population.

We as a society cannot stand for this.We as parents can tell our children how
gorgeous they are, how beautiful of a person they are, till we are blue in the
face.But it only takes one store, one
ad in a magazine, one TV program, to show them otherwise.Are we stronger than people like Mike Jeffries?Can we stand up to him and say enough is
enough?I hope so.I truly hope so.

Hey, the market will give A&F's CEO what he deserves. He's already told the market that he's only interested in a small percentage of it, and even those people have a lot of other choices. So, he'll be cool and out of business. Except, he won't even be cool...

One thing I'm never throwing at him is my hard earned money! First victoria secret with the pre-teen panty line (punny, yea) and now dick CEO (have you seen HIS picture?). As if there aren't enough reasons for my son to think he's less than awesome.... Sigh

Want Funny Things in Your Inbox? Follow by Email...

About Me

I'm a sarcastic tell it like it is mom who knows that parenting is hard...but tequila helps...
Here I tell my story about being a mom of two wild and crazy boys. Enjoy my son's antics, would ya? Someone really should after all...
Join my blog, like my FB page, follow me on Twitter. I'm funny. I promise.