User:Snood Trunion/bios

14 Oct -- 25 Oct, 2005
Not much is known about the Snood Trunion, aside from the well-documented exploits of his brother and sister Trunions. No, the Snood Trunion much despises familiarity, prefering to sulk around in the dark, shadowy confines of his grand manor, which is widely known to be the largest building in Folktown. It is rumored he has a great many young females traipsing his halls, tending to his every whim. It is also rumored that the grand building in Folktown is not even his residence. As he keeps his business so secretive, most of what is "known" about him is purely hearsay. Many don't even know what manner of species of creature he is, and those who do know, and do tell, are taken with their word as false.

As for the validity of "Snood" being his real name, is has been widely reported that the moniker is indeed an alias. Reports of his actual name vary, from one "official" publication outing him as Corinne Gublingmig, the female adventurer from several centuries ago, to another purporting to have evidence of a written certificate of his birth, in which his name is shown to be Bryan Andrews. But then again, no one could (or should, for that matter) ever be born with such a droll name.

25 Oct -- 26 Oct, 2005
Hello, I am the Snood Trunion, last and greatest of the Trunion line. Actually, I don't know for sure that I am the last, as I don't speak to my family since they kicked me out of the basement. I am a scholar, which means I have free reign about the town to copy down my observances, and nobody can tell me my word is false. That also means I don't have to have a "real" job, so there's another plus.

My life consists of donning the preferred disguise of the day (as I am hideously ugly beneath) and walking about Folktown, where I live in the largest building in town. At least, it's largest to me, as I stand no taller than two or three kinanits. One thing I do have to say about the people of Folktown: your feet stink! Do you make it a point to trudge in every splak mound you find?

One last thing: my identity is my own, and not the intellectual property of some twenty-year-old sitting at his desk prescribing my past, present, and destiny. I am my own creature, damnit!

02 Nov -- 04 Nov, 2005
Not the brightest needle in the splak.
Not the highest string in the kitchen.
Not the loosest ball on the chain.
Not the most exascerbated Monotapute on the plains.
Not even sure how to spell exascerbated.
And neverthelessly, one of the foremost scholars and tea brewers on the whole of Ghyll proper.

"If I only had more fefferberries..."

04 Nov -- 30 Nov, 2005
The scholarly pursuits of The Snood Trunion, the youngest of this generation of the Trunion lineage, began when he was but four years out of the womb. For it was at this time that he set about trying to put together a detailed classification of all his toy blocks not only by color, but by relative size, weight, shape, and number of bumpy things on the top. And yet, after having devoted seven years of his young life to this endeavor, he felt his life was still not complete. Thus, he applied to Bute University at the tender age of 11. He was, quite succinctly, denied admittance. This traumatizing event stilted the poor Snood's image of himself, and he went into hiding in the basement of his parent's home. He did not resurface until about -9 EC, at which point he published his book of memoirs, entitled Playing the Field: How to Pretend to Know Everything About Everything. The book was a best-seller for twelve weeks.

The Snood Trunion currently lives in Folktown, where he pretends to know everything about everything. In other words, he has successfully assimilated himself with every other scholar in Ghyll.