Family

by Julie Branstetter, Th.B.

Elm City, Nc

Welcome to my family blog. I have been a 'stay at home mom' from the time I gave birth to my first daughter in 2002. I started homeschooling in 2013. I am a Christian mom and often find much of my encouragement through my faith. My writing is inspired by Scripture. Then there are the things that we ladies learn from experience. Once you've been married with children for a number of years you pick up a few nuggets of wisdom. I am so thankful for the help I have gained from other parents and couples over the years. I hope these articles will also enlighten and encourage you in the same way. Guest posting is always welcomed.

One of the things I love about marriage is having my best friend always by my side. Even during those times when we aggravate one another we still wouldn't ever have it any other way. Maybe we are an odd couple but we find it difficult to be away from each other for even a few hours and we've been together in that fashion for going on 13 years. From the time we first started dating we just knew we wanted to always be together. There are very infrequent times when my husband will have to work out of town over night but even his employer knows that we hate to be apart and they try not to schedule him for out of town work if at all possible. Unfortunately he will have to work out of town for three days in a few weeks and we are both dreading it, but we do what we need to do to get the bills paid. We'll be going camping on the North Carolina coast the week after he comes home so I choose to think about that. :)

But there is something important we have learned about marriage and maybe it is a little unconventional but marriage is not 50/50. Any marriage that works on the 50/50 mantra is bound to hit very rough spots and even fail. We have learned that marriage has to be 100/0 for both of us at all times. This doesn't mean that one person always does it all, it means that each of us are WILLING TO DO IT All when the other can't find the strength to do anything. For better or for worse, in sickness and in health we each do our best unconditionally. The truth is, sometimes we have bad days, and sometimes we can't muster within ourselves the exuberance we might wish we could have every day, but if we both commit to love the other one unconditionally and put each others needs before our own, then our marriage will always be strong. We believe this is the way God intends for marriage to be because we are told to love each other unconditionally and with total commitment. God loves us this way, even when we fail and don't measure up, God's love never fails. If we imitate Him in the way we love each other, then our love will never fail either. I believe this type of love for each other also inspires us and causes our love for each other to grow as the years go on. I could never have dreamed that I would love my husband MORE than I did when we were first married. I just thought there couldn't possibly be another drop of love in the world because I already loved him so much. Having never loved the way I love my husband now I couldn't have imagined, but the love I have for him now is less about how I feel and so much more about how he feels. I care more about him now than ever before. A successful relationship is not built on the foundation of a fuzzy feeling, but on a determination to see the very best for our spouse especially in times when they are broken and in need. What a blessing being married is when it is this way!