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While conventional wisdom says that lying in a relationship
is never acceptable, the truth is that some small lies can actually contribute
to a healthy relationship. Brutal honesty can feel like rejection a lot of
times, but the trick is knowing when it’s the right time to tell a white lie
and when it’s time to be truthful.

There are plenty of reasons to lie to your significant
other, from avoiding conflict to sparing your partner a lot of hurt, but the
key to keeping things balanced is knowing when it’s OK to lie in a relationship.
Find out which small lies aren’t that bad.

Little White Lies vs.
Deceit

Before you learn more about acceptable lies, it’s important
to draw the line between a few kind lies and outright deceit. If you let lying
take over your interactions with your partner, things will end badly. Fibbing
is only acceptable when honesty takes second place to being loyal,
compassionate or morally supportive. Avoid being deceitful in a way that’s
clearly a betrayal of trust.

When You’ve Got a
Crush

It would be nice if love was a constant an overflowing feeling,
but even when you’re very much in love, you can still find other people very
attractive. Having a crush is one of the best examples of when it’s OK to lie in a relationship. Your boyfriend or husband doesn’t need to hear about your
new hot co-worker. The crush will pass, and your relationship will be stronger because
you didn’t go for total honesty and made your guy jealous over nothing.

When the Truth Would
Hurt His Self Confidence

Faking orgasms is definitely not a good idea in the long
run, but sometimes, when your man is doing his best to get you off, it’s kinder
to give him a compliment that you don’t really mean. Focus on helping him
improve inside and outside of the bedroom, but don’t tell him “You suck at this”,
even if it’s completely true.

When You Hate His
Friends of Family

Sometimes it’s OK to lie in a relationship when the truth
only creates gratuitous conflict. Telling your man how little you think of his
friends or his family will come across as an insult, and it’s an example of introducing
harmful negativity in your relationship for no good reason. They’re part of his
life, just like you are, and sharing your honest disdain about them
accomplishes nothing.

When Brutal Honesty
Is Gratuitously Hurtful

Keeping your relationship honest and giving constructive criticism
does not mean telling him the meal he spent hours cooking for you tastes
revolting. Aim for balance between letting go of the small things and helping
him improve himself without making him feel inadequate.

When You Go Overboard
with Shopping

Retail therapy can be very effective when you’re down, but
it might also be one of the times when it’s OK to lie in a relationship if you
spent too much. It’s only acceptable to lie about how much you spent when it’s
your own money. If you’re a shopaholic who abuses the joint bank account, lying
will only make things worse.

When You Want to End
an Argument

Dealing with conflict sometimes means just giving up. Even
if you’re convinced he’s wrong and you’re right, you can’t continue to have
argument after argument about the same things. A small white lie that ends a
negative situation is acceptable, as long it’s not a serious lie.

When You’re a
Pessimist

Being a pessimist and a supportive partner don’t always go
hand in hand. It’s OK to lie in a relationship when your first thought is
always “You’ll fail” or “This won’t end well”. Be supportive and realistic
without injecting too much negative energy in the situation.

Avoiding Self-Serving
Lies

Lies that make you look better are barely acceptable for the
first few dates, but they have no place in a healthy relationship. When your
lies are just designed to build you up, your lack of honesty will come back to
bite you.

Staying Away from
Serious Lies

The most important rule of when it’s OK to lie in a
relationship is to stick to innocent stuff that only matters in the moment. If
you’re being deceitful with serious lies that you have to sustain in the long
run, you’re hurting your relationship.