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By Debbie Schlussel
The new immigration bill being pimped on us by the Bush-Kennedy Klan is a lot like Barbra Streisand and Cher.
Every decade–no every year for the last couple of decades–we’ve been told this is the last one: The last Barbra Streisand World Tour. The last Cher Farewell Tour. The last Immigration Amnesty. The last one, as opposed to the last, last one, and the last, last, last one before that.
And yet every year, these aging, outdated, decrepit phenomena keep repeating–the latest “last” Cher Farewell Tour; the latest “last” Barbra Streisand World Tour; and now, the latest “last” “comprehensive” immigration bill. Like flatulence from a bean burrito, they keep repeating. Keep coming back to us with a bad smell.

The only difference is that two out of the three only have big hair and bad, loudmouth politics. But one out of the three will change America as we know it . . . forever. And significantly jeopardize our nation’s national security.
One day, despite the plastic surgery, Barbra Streisand and Cher will truly retire and/or die. And their tours will end.
Unfortunately, “comprehensive immigration reform” will not. It can and will go through infinite make-overs and plastic surgery operations from new generations of Congress.
This version won’t be the last one.
Yup, unfortunately, while the two loudmouthed, chintzy singers from the ’70s will someday actually end their tours of America, immigration amnesty is a bad concert tour that will plague America forever . . . or until there is no America left.
It used to be only two things were for certain: death and taxes. Now, it’s death, taxes, and “comprehensive immigration reform” a/k/a illegal alien amnesty.Amnesty Bill: La Raza Nation in the Making, And . . .

El Presidente Jorge Arbusto and his whacky immigration ideas hinder our fight against terrorism. This amnesty plan not only applies to the Latinos, but also to every other Turd-World enemy of America. This plan would’ve given amnesty to the illegal aliens from the Fort Dix Six and every other subhuman savage that is here illegally and who’s plotting against us.
What el Presidente Jorge Arbusto doesn’t seem to grasp is that America is supposed to be a melting pot and not some hodgepodge mosaic of people who come here to Balkanize us.
The issue is NOT diversity, but rather INCLUSION.
Not diversity but ASSIMILATION.
Seal the borders; deport the illegal vermin; get rid of the failed visa programs; and select those who come here who want to be part of the American language, culture, and customs.

I was discussing immigration with a Christian Eritrean coworker today who is here legally, who said something that everyone should take note of. He said it is so difficult for Africans to get legal visas that many of them are now going first to Latin America and crossing the Mexican border because they know there is no enforcement.
Until there is a fence along the entire Mexican border, we shouldn’t even be discussing a guest worker program.

The Traitor-Government never talks about the SIX MILLION illegal aliens who already got amnesty! And they say the new figure is only 12 million, when we all know it’s closer to 20 million, and that’s before the NEXT wave of invaders, and all their families.

“Like flatulence from a bean burrito, they keep repeating. Keep coming back to us with a bad smell.”
Si Senorita!!! And what a stench it is that we will pay and pay and pay for!
Great piece and right on point, Debbie. Your wit is so robusto! What is no joke is that the future of our country is really on the line on this.

Let’s get right to it. This immigration situation is only a problem because we want to keep terrorist scum out of our country. No one ever gave a damn about Mexicans before 9/11.
Who’s going to wash dishes in a steaming hot kitchen for 14 hours a day for minimum wage? No one. As soon as the Mexicans get amnesty, they will get better jobs and a new crop of illegal aliens will take their place.
Let’s stop picking on the hapless, hard working Mexicans and concentrate on the “students” and other Islamic nuts who come over here and “work” for their uncles. It’s these middle-east losers who come over for an easy life or to sow their wild oats before marrying their virginal hags that cause all the problems. A typical Mexican living in the US doesn’t have time to cause trouble – he’s working too hard.

LoveAManInAUniform-
I would much rather have a Mexican problem that we have than a Muslim problem like the Europeans have. But see my comment above. EVERY Muslim in the world now knows the easiest way to get into our country is to sneak across the southern border, and they know once they get in, they will never be deported and can get amnesty eventually. We can’t take care of the Muslim problem unless we build a fence on the southern border and deport ALL illegals.

One of my co-workers just told me that the authorities in Virginia recently foiled a Muslim-American plot to fire bomb persons attending Jerry Falwell’s funeral.
Does anyone out there know whether this is true?

Just one comment: you have the facts wrong on Streisand and Cher. I’ve worked for years as a concert promoter at a large venue, and while Streisand did come back after a ‘farewell’ tour, Cher did not. She only had one farewell tour (it lasted a very long time – 3 years, and came to our venue multiple times, but it went without interruptions – a single tour all around US and the world). By all signs, she’s not intending to come back (she’s gained 20+ pounds and stopped facelifts – she looks about her age now).
By the way, what do you think about Cher’s campaign to get our soldiers better armor? While she has badmouthed Bush administration, she hasn’t said one bad word about our soldiers. In fact, she’s donated a lot of money for helmet pads and visits military hospitals on a regular basis – without a band of press hounds for publicity.
For full disclosure, I am acquainted with Cher’s son, Elijah, and I’ve met her in passing. She’s a pretty nice lady, and actually kinda shy when she’s not on stage. I read your blog often, but it’s actually really weird to see you personally attack someone I know (chintzy? decrepit? like flatulence? Ouch.)

Debbie – right on, great commentary. Pretty much everyone else’s comments are on target as well. One thing that really pisses me off is the assumption that these “aliens” will do the jobs that Americans won’t do. Bullcrap!!! There are high school and college students (reall Americans) that should and will do those jobs. No wonder we are so screwed up. Parents should MAKE their kids get out and work hard. That’s how you get ahead in America. If they want their Nintendo or iPOD, they can go out and work for them, just like most of us did/are. There can be NO immigration reform until we have eliminated the clear and present danger to our border, society, and freedom!

Auslander Raus!
Why not do what Hitler did for those unassimilating Jews???
i was listening to Sirius Left last week and both Lynn Samuels AND the dude that followed her were so anti-MEXICAN, which is what it all boils down to. A few years ago i heard one of the Limbaughnistas on WABC…the premier Reich-wing talk radio station in NYC that unleashed Sean Hannity on the world…say that they the cuntry started going down hill with the 1965 Immigration Act.
For those of you too lazy to Google it, that was when Amerikkka switched immigration quotas from Europeans to West Indians, something MY father didn’t need since he had served in the USAF, but it opened the doors for some of my Jamaican brethren:)
WE used to be the Mexicans in the Sixties, yet WE always had 2 or 3 jobs, OBEYED the law [for the most part], and never really assimilated. THIS COUNTRY is known worldwide for its laziness, as well as its arrogance—and one of the reasons everyone wants to come here is because it’s so much EASIER to make a buck here.
The REAL AMERICANS are either on reservations or running casinos…and like them, i don’t think ANY of us OWNS shit…we’re just stewards of the land, which y’all are totally fucking up. HIPPIEish…sure…but yesterday i was at a high school graduation ceremony in Colorado Springs—HOME of 2 Air Force bases AND an Army base—and the salutatorian, Garrett Fiddler, riffed about OUR mortality.
HE said that probability-wise, 98% of us will be dead in a 100 years, 100% in a hundred and fifty, and he exhorted his fellow grads to BE ALL THEY COULD BE whether they believed in God or were atheists…THAT, in his young mind, is the ideal ALL MEN should strive for.
Hearing Lynn Samuels advocating shooting Mexicans to discourage them from coming over the border clearly demonstrates THIS is a WHITE THING!!!
For all y’all biblehumpers out there…hope you’re PRAYING that there’s no god because the road to hell is paved with “good” Christians.

“Let’s stop picking on the hapless, hard working Mexicans”
Hapless? Oh I see you think they are stupid or know not what they do? They have no idea they are braking our laws or wholesale changing our culture. How about the Hispanic Caucus or LaRaza or MEHcA? Are they also hapless? What direction and what flavor of our country do you think they promote and want? Most of these hapless Mestizos/Latinos come from Marxist/socialist governments that not only make them “good little soldiers” but also promote hatred of of us and in particular America. Don’t be so damn naive or hapless. We are being INVADED!

Hey I got an idea. Why don’t we take the two border agencies, INS & CUSTOMS and break them up into 3 different agencies under a brand new department. This will be a much more efficient way of handling these problems. Instead of just one IMMIGRATION agency, lets make three, CIS, CBP and ICE. Lets just make two agencies to handle CUSTOMS matters, CBP & ICE. But since we have three agencies for Immigration and only two for Customs, lets take the Border Patrol away from the Immigration agency and put them under the primary Customs agency. Then lets take the agency that detains and removes the illegals that the Border Patrol apprehends and put them under another agency,ICE. That way we have uniforms in one agency, detectives in another, one agency arrests most of the illegals, but another agency detains them and removes them and yet another agency can handle administrative issues, and citizenship issues. Yeah, thats the ticket. Lets mix in some building guards from GSA and some air marshalls from TSA and assign them to ICE. Ok, thats cool, lets take the air marshalls out of ICE but keep the FPS under ICE and move the Customs air and marine branch to the Border Patrol and tell ICE to go fly a kite. Yeah, and then we can staff some marine smuggling groups with ICE agents and some with CBP officers and mix in the coast guard. I’m one smart dude. Problem solved and it only cost like a few hundred billion more than the original INS & CUSTOMS! Me thinks I could be president of the United States if I only lose a few billion more brain cells drinking coors light from a miller tap.