Girl, if there is any doubt in your mind as to what time it is, let me break it down for you: It is time to post SMOOVE B quotes & excerpts

Perhaps you were upset by the sliced fruit that I brought to you. I brought you those slices of fruit because I thought that you might be hungry. If those fruit slices were not fresh enough, I will go to the 24-hour supermarket all the way on the other side of town and hand-select the store's ripest kiwi, in hopes that you will find it acceptable. If you don't like kiwi, I will seek out a farmers market and purchase fresh fruits of the finest local varieties.

Please, girl, come back to the sexy side before it is too late. If you would only come back to me, I would take care of you. I would give you multiple baths to cleanse all the white boy off of you. Afterward, we would lie on my luxurious bearskin rug and watch black erotic cinema until late in the night. When you were hungry I would hand-feed you a meal, starting off with spring rolls and other finger foods, and working our way up to exotic fruits and other things that are covered in chocolate.

When you are ready, I would hit you doggy-style—but only for half of the night. I am most sorry to say you will not be ready for an all-night encounter with Smoove for quite some time. It pains me to say it, but this other man has damaged you.

I have talked it over with my main man, Darnell, and he thinks I'm crazy for wanting to father a child. However, Darnell never really thinks in the long term. That is why I am developing a line of fragrances for men and he is not. He just doesn't see the big picture.