Sunday, March 05, 2017

Radio Daze

Here’s another tale from my colorful yet brief radio career.

Among the many things missing in radio today are pranks. Back when
there were live local broadcasters and actual competition between
stations (one company didn’t own them all), a by-product was
one-ups-manship. I was involved in one stunt during my first job.

I was a sports intern at KMPC in Los Angeles. They were the big
full-service station in town. Their disc jockeys were national
celebrities like Gary Owens, Wink Martindale, and Jim Lange. They
carried the Rams, Angels, and UCLA Bruins. And they had helicopters and
mobile units. I think their local news department was larger than
CNN’s is now. The studios were essentially in the White House.

It was the summer of 1970. I worked Monday through Friday from 6 AM – 3 PM. (Yes, the hours were long but they were paying me minimum wage.) I wrote sports reports, made coffee, and emptied ashtrays.

Meanwhile, their competitor was KGIL in the San Fernando Valley. Their
signal was nothing compared to KMPC’s. If they had a helicopter it was
made by Hasbro. Their "skywatch" was probably a guy on a mountain top
with binoculars. But their morning man was brilliant. Sweet Dick
Whittington was (and is) one of the funniest, most inventive
radio personalities I have ever heard. I was a huge fan. We had met
on a couple of occasions. Okay, so that’s the backstory.

Sweet Dick

I’m at my desk. It’s about 7:45 in the morning and my phone rings.
It’s some goofball who says he’s the singing newsman from some station
in Denver and wonders if there are any openings at KMPC. I tell him I
didn’t think so. He asks if he could audition for me. This
sounds strange to me but I say okay. Who doesn't like to be serenaded
about a bus plunge? He begins singing some news story. I figure it
out. It’s Whittington using a phony voice. I assume he's on the air
live. I let him finish, tell him he’s great. Then I say, “Y’know, I’m
frustrated that I’m not on the air. I have a pretty good singing voice.
Could I audition for you?” He’s a little thrown but says okay. I
then sing the KMPC jingle. There’s a pause and he says, “You’re a
rotten kid!” and hangs up.

I was right. This bit went out on the air live, my singing KMPC’s jingle included.

So I go the rest of the morning feeling pretty good about myself. Word
gets around the station and a few salesmen and other employees stop in
the newsroom to congratulate me.

At around noon, Stan Spero, the General Manager comes in. He asks if I
was the one who pulled that stunt on KGIL? Yes, I say proudly. He
tells me there’s someone who wants to speak to me. Now Stan Warwick,
the General Manager of KGIL enters the room. What the fuck is he doing
there? Warwick is clearly pissed. He begins grilling me. “Did I think
it was funny to embarrass his station?” “Is this how I conduct myself
as a professional?” Needless to say, I’m sweating buckets. I look to
my GM for support. He’s just glaring at me. Fun is fun but apparently
I had crossed a line.

Just at the point I was ready to hang myself with a teletype ribbon they
both break up laughing. I had been punked. Orchestrated of course, by
Dick Whittington. The two general managers were friends and had
planned on getting together for lunch that day anyway. Both appreciated
a good radio prank and appreciated even more getting back at the
prankster.

Dick Whittington is one of my favorite people in the world. But I hope he’s sleeping with one eye open. Because it’s my turn.

10 comments
:

Anonymous
said...

Great story and the good thing that comes out of prankstock is you can tell who can take a joke and who can't. Hint: stay close to the people who can take it in stride they're usually well worth the time.

I was busy so missed the Oscars and your podcast. Caught up with all the hullabaloo on YouTube and your podcast today. Once again great review. Thank you very much for the written review too. Ha Ha..... lots of demanding readers.

Anyway, I was surprised both you and your readers missed something. No one talked about the last producer of La La Land, who even knowing that the movie lost, went on to give the speech. How unethical and unprofessional....

What's your take on it? Will he be punished by removing him from the Academy membership list or something like that?

Here is an article for your question: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/mar/03/oscars-accountants-hollywood-academy

Academy will never punish their own. And yes many noticed what Fred Berger did.

I am reading all articles on Oscars in the hope that I get my question answered. My question was answered partially here about Vince Vaughn comparing Jimmy to a dead actor. But why? How was that a retort to Jimmy's Mel Gibson dig at Vince? Still waiting..... :(

KGIL's spot on the dial (1260) now is occupied by a simulcast of classical/public radio KUSC-FM. Of course, AM radio's mono-with-static signal is just perfect for Bach, Mozart, etc. (How did Arturo Toscanini and the NBC Orchestra succeed back in the day?)

FQ for Ken, since St. Pat's Day is coming up: The 'Bar Wars VII: The Naked Prey' episode of 'Cheers' written by you and David is by far and away my all-time favorite episode of the entire 11-season run. Everything about it was perfect, IMO. Here's the question: Wherever did the 'Limey Scum' song come from? The whole setup to the morose Irish band singing that song *still* makes me laugh like hell every time no matter how many times I see it. That band was an absolute stroke of genius, you two. Thank you so much for that!!

About KEN LEVINE

Named one of the BEST 25 BLOGS by TIME Magazine. Ken Levine is an Emmy winning writer/director/producer/major league baseball announcer. In a career that has spanned over 30 years Ken has worked on MASH, CHEERS, FRASIER, THE SIMPSONS, WINGS, EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND, BECKER, DHARMA & GREG, and has co-created three series. He and his partner wrote the feature VOLUNTEERS. Ken has also been the radio/TV play-by-play voice of the Baltimore Orioles, Seattle Mariners, San Diego Padres. and Dodger Talk. He hosts the podcast HOLLYWOOD & LEVINE

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