Fort Worth City Council member Joel Burns' message to gay teens is heartfelt, resonating

If the now-viral video of Fort Worth City Council member Joel
Burns' extraordinary address during an otherwise routine meeting
Tuesday does not move you to tears, you surely have a tough,
leathery little peanut for a heart. I can't watch it without
crying.

Burns, who is gay, spoke directly to young victims of anti-gay
bullying (none of whom, it's a safe bet, were at a sparsely
attended City Council meeting on a Tuesday night, but who are
presumably being reached through the irrepressible tom-toms of the
Internet).

He shared his own teenage experience of ugly, mindless
victimization, and he made the promise to kids enduring similar
torment: "It gets better."

Technically speaking, that's "It Gets Better" - with caps -
since it's the name for an informal online video project of adults
sharing their coming-out stories to teens who are struggling with
their sexual orientation and especially vulnerable to
harassment.

Was Burns' address crafted in advance? Was it a piece of
political theater?

I suppose so, but so were the most heartfelt, enduring,
resonating examples of oratory our nation has ever produced.

The cynic in me doesn't want to say this out loud, but it's the
truth: Burns' statement - at a meeting of the Fort Worth, Texas,
City Council, of all the places in the known universe - could save
somebody's life. It might already have.

Burns first showed photos and told stories of a half-dozen teens
whose recent suicides have been linked to ridicule they received
for being - or being thought to be - gay.

One, a 13-year-old New Mexico boy named Seth Walsh, had been
tormented for years, Burns said. "Other students told him 'the
world didn't need another queer.'."

Seth's mother found him hanging in the backyard. He lived for
nine days on life support before dying a few days ago.

As cruel as these stories are, they are the most poignant
evidence there is against the absurd notion that sexual orientation
is a "lifestyle choice" instead of a biological reality. What
13-year-old boy "chooses" to be humiliated to the point of hanging
himself?

Burns deliberately sought the attention of scared, isolated kids
who fear their misery is permanent.

"I know that life can seem unbearable … but I want you to
know that it gets better," he said, pausing frequently to choke
back the tears. And he supplied the testimony to prove his
credibility.

As a young teen in the conservative Fort Worth suburb of
Crowley, he was a self-described "band dork" with a tendency to
stumble over his own feet. His parents were a church pianist and a
bona-fide cowboy.

"As their son and as a kid in a small town, there was a certain
image of who I was supposed to be. But as I entered adolescence, I
started having feelings that I didn't understand and couldn't
explain. I knew they didn't mesh with the image of what I thought I
was supposed to be.

"One day when I was in the ninth grade" - here, in the video,
Burns steels himself to keep going - "I was cornered by some older
kids who roughed me up.

"They said that I was a faggot, and that I should die and go to
hell where I belonged."

Imagine being on the receiving end of such absolute contempt at
the most sensitive, self-conscious, angst-ridden point of your
entire life: You should die, you belong in hell.

"That erupted the fear that I had kept pushed down, that what I
was beginning to feel on the inside must somehow be showing on the
outside … There must be something very wrong with me, I
thought. Something I could never let my family or anyone else
know."

But it did, indeed, get better, he said.

"You will get out of the household that doesn't accept you. You
will get out of that high school, and you don't ever have to deal
with those jerks again, if you don't want to."

Now 40, Burns is happily married (yes, to a man, in case you're
wondering). He has a wide circle of family and friends and holds a
respected elected office.

"Please stick around to make those happy memories for yourself,"
he said - pleaded, really, to his unseen target audience. "And the
attitudes of society will change. Please live long enough to be
there to see it."

Watching the video, I could not doubt Burns' selflessness or
sincerity. I could tell by his tears.

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