Spurious Awards

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Autons in advertising, Joker impressions and a potty-mouthed tribute to Ray Bradbury in this week’s Spurious Awards

LAMEST DARK KNIGHT JOKER IMPRESSION OF THE WEEK

Either that, or True Blood ’s Russell Edgington is a secret fan of Robert Smith from The Cure.

WORST COCK AND BALLS OF THE WEEK

We seriously hope the budding Banksy who drew this in Syfy’s Haven wasn’t drawing from his own experience, otherwise he seriously needs to get a doctor to check out his tackle.

EVIDENCE THAT BBC IS DUMBING DOWN OF THE WEEK

Imagine our surprise! In amongst usual questions about accessory pigments in photosynthesis, the genus lutra lutra , functionalism and polynucleotides on highbrow quiz show University Challenge there was a round where we could shine. A grimacing Jeremey Paxman asked the contestants of Christ’s College Cambridge and Liverpool Uni to identify four fictional languages from SF and fantasy, clearly pained by the ignominy of having to say “Black speech of Mordor” on national telly (that’s a clue to the easiest one by the way). Is it just a spooky coincidence that the captain of the team that got all the answers correct appears to have been capped by the Tripods? Anyway, see if you can do just as well…

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SHOEBOX OF THE WEEK Okay, okay, we’ve Spurious Awarded Adidas’s Star Wars range to death in the past, but just when you think there’s no more mileage in it, the company comes up with this cracker, too good to ignore. To be honest, the actual Han Solo SL-72 trainers are probably about the coolest in the range (which isn’t hard, as the rest of the range is about as cool as Bonnie Langford) and we could conceivably wear them. But two things make them prime Spurious material.

1) They come with their very own “Carbonite casings”, which actually look nothing like Carbonite and more like a moulded plastic mirror (you can even see the photographer reflected in the one in the publicity photo).They’d make terrific jelly moulds, though.

2) The picture of Han Solo on the tongue couldn’t look less like Harrison Ford if it tried. Indeed, the resemblance to this bloke on the Dr Blood 's Coffin poster is uncanny…

SEXUALLY EXPLICIT TRIBUTE TO A NONAGENARIAN OF THE WEEK Good lord … ( this video features naughty language)

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FANTASY SCHEDULING OF THE WEEK This went viral over the last couple of weeks. Seems like somebody’s not happy with what’s on the telly at moment…

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FREAKIEST HEADLINE OF THE WEEK Thanks to reader Simon Martin for spotting this one: “I work in advertising. It's full of weirdos with fashion specs and beards. But even I was quite taken aback when I saw the headline on an article on brandrepublic.com, the trade's news website.”