The viral relationship ‘test’ to find out how faithful your partner is

By Amy Lyall| 4 weeks ago

If you ask anyone what their core values are when it comes to a relationship, there’s a pretty good chance they’re going to list ‘trust’ as one of them.

There are plenty of ways to approach trust, but one author has come up with a so-called test for relationships.

The phone drop test is exactly what it sounds like.

“What will your spouse find on your phone if right now, without notice, you dropped your phone on the counter and gave them uninhibited access?” Fierce Marriage co-creator Ryan Frederick asked in a blog post.

A lot of people consider 'trust' a core relationship value. (Unsplash)

Ryan claims the test is not so much about trust, but about integrity.

We all know our phones are full of personal information, from photos and emails to browser history and social media applications, and can include things you want to keep private.

The idea of the exercise is: would you feel comfortable with your partner going through your phone? It also highlights that trust is a two-way street and it involves how both of you feel.

Of course, some people will be hesitant to hand over the details for their significant other to get into their Facebook or Instagram, while others won’t see a single issue with it.

But it is a topic that can bring up a lot of conflict, and you have to start by trying to understand why the other person wants to be able to access your passwords.

"The desire to exchange passwords can mean a variety of things for either partner, such as a symbol of closeness and growth in a relationship," Dr. Benjamin Ritter, founder of Live for Yourself Consulting, and The Breakup Supplement told Elite Daily.

"If the issue is based on a desire for closeness, then examine that, and figure out how you can compromise in a way that is meaningful to your partner and protects your desire for separateness."

But he also explained if your partner is pushing to exchange passwords it could point to a lack of trust.

“If the issue is based on trust, then you'll need to figure out where that stems from and discuss how to rebuild that trust — which may include giving them your passwords for a bit,” Dr Ritter explained.

The reason behind the password discussion could say a lot about your relationship. (iStock)

If you think your partner only wants your password to be able to snoop, then there might be other issues in your relationship that you need to look at first.

But as Ryan pointed out in the ‘drop test’, if you are hesitant to give your partner your phone openly, then you also need to look at your own feelings about it.

He explained that while it can be difficult to bring up the conversation about transparency, when you’ve done it your relationship will definitely benefit.

“Complete, utter, and uninhibited transparency with your spouse is incredibly liberating. It’s one of those things where, once you’re on the other side of it, you wonder why you didn’t do it sooner. Hiding is exhausting,” he explained.

Obviously each relationship is different and every couple views trust on a different level, but if you think there is an issue, it’s probably worth discussing with your partner or seeking professional advice