Friendships that fuel the soul

By Ron Shive

Published: Friday, June 13, 2014 at 05:01 PM.

It seems like a day does not go by that someone does not send me one of those emails that is full of religious humor. I received one that tells the story of a father who is approached by his small son who tells him proudly, “I know what the Bible means!” His father smiles and replies, “What do you mean, you ‘know’ what the Bible means? The son replied, “I do know!” “OK,” said his father. “What does the Bible mean?” “That’s easy, Daddy,” the young boy replied excitedly, “It stands for ‘Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.’”

While cute, I think that the boy missed something very important. The Bible is not “Basic Information Before Leaving Earth,” but rather is “Basic Information aBout Living on Earth.” The thrust of scripture is not to get us ready to leave this life. The thrust of scripture is to help us live this life faithfully.

The Biblical story of David and Jonathan is a model of this “Basic Information aBout Living on Earth”. David, the son of Jesse, was a shepherd boy and became the greatest king that Israel ever had. He became known as the man after God’s heart. David’s journey to these heights took him through the valley of loneliness, where he was befriended by Jonathon. You will recall that Saul was the first king of Israel and his son, Jonathan, was his heir-apparent. While David was still a teenager tending his father’s sheep, Jonathan was a young man gaining fame for his exploits against Israel’s arch-enemy, the Philistines.

In the battle against the Philistines and Goliath in particular, David, the shepherd boy stepped up to the plate when all other batters were trembling in the dugout. David became, on that day, an object of love for Jonathan and all Israel, and an object of growing hostility and jealous anger for Saul. From that moment on, the enmity of Saul would shape David’s life; and the friendship of Jonathan would save David’s life. This was a friendship in spite of their differences. One was a king’s eldest son and heir apparent. The other was the youngest son of a village shepherd. This companionship saved David’s life in spirit and in body. The friendship between David and Jonathan is one of the greatest biblical examples of the life-giving friendships that God wants to sustain us.

Eugene Peterson in his book, “Leap Over A Wall: Earthy Spirituality for Everyday Christians,” writes: “Friendship is a much underestimated aspect of spirituality. It’s every bit as significant as prayer and fasting. Like the sacramental use of water and bread and wine, friendship takes what’s common in human experience and turns it into something holy … Jonathan’s friendship entered David’s soul in a way that Saul’s hatred never did.”

How and when have you experienced the sacramental nature of friendship? How has a friendship entered your soul?

Gregory Jones, the former dean of Duke University Divinity School, says: “Such friends are agents of healing and wholeness, people who mend our lives by gathering the tattered pieces of ourselves and quilting them into a redemptive fabric. Such friends are a holy gift. These friends are all the more important because there are others who play an opposite role in our lives. Some people carve us into pieces, or take the pieces that we are and break us into even smaller fragments. These people haunt us and make it difficult for us to imagine that we’ll ever be whole, or manage to put the pieces into a right order.”

It seems like a day does not go by that someone does not send me one of those emails that is full of religious humor. I received one that tells the story of a father who is approached by his small son who tells him proudly, “I know what the Bible means!” His father smiles and replies, “What do you mean, you ‘know’ what the Bible means? The son replied, “I do know!” “OK,” said his father. “What does the Bible mean?” “That’s easy, Daddy,” the young boy replied excitedly, “It stands for ‘Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.’”

While cute, I think that the boy missed something very important. The Bible is not “Basic Information Before Leaving Earth,” but rather is “Basic Information aBout Living on Earth.” The thrust of scripture is not to get us ready to leave this life. The thrust of scripture is to help us live this life faithfully.

The Biblical story of David and Jonathan is a model of this “Basic Information aBout Living on Earth”. David, the son of Jesse, was a shepherd boy and became the greatest king that Israel ever had. He became known as the man after God’s heart. David’s journey to these heights took him through the valley of loneliness, where he was befriended by Jonathon. You will recall that Saul was the first king of Israel and his son, Jonathan, was his heir-apparent. While David was still a teenager tending his father’s sheep, Jonathan was a young man gaining fame for his exploits against Israel’s arch-enemy, the Philistines.

In the battle against the Philistines and Goliath in particular, David, the shepherd boy stepped up to the plate when all other batters were trembling in the dugout. David became, on that day, an object of love for Jonathan and all Israel, and an object of growing hostility and jealous anger for Saul. From that moment on, the enmity of Saul would shape David’s life; and the friendship of Jonathan would save David’s life. This was a friendship in spite of their differences. One was a king’s eldest son and heir apparent. The other was the youngest son of a village shepherd. This companionship saved David’s life in spirit and in body. The friendship between David and Jonathan is one of the greatest biblical examples of the life-giving friendships that God wants to sustain us.

Eugene Peterson in his book, “Leap Over A Wall: Earthy Spirituality for Everyday Christians,” writes: “Friendship is a much underestimated aspect of spirituality. It’s every bit as significant as prayer and fasting. Like the sacramental use of water and bread and wine, friendship takes what’s common in human experience and turns it into something holy … Jonathan’s friendship entered David’s soul in a way that Saul’s hatred never did.”

How and when have you experienced the sacramental nature of friendship? How has a friendship entered your soul?

Gregory Jones, the former dean of Duke University Divinity School, says: “Such friends are agents of healing and wholeness, people who mend our lives by gathering the tattered pieces of ourselves and quilting them into a redemptive fabric. Such friends are a holy gift. These friends are all the more important because there are others who play an opposite role in our lives. Some people carve us into pieces, or take the pieces that we are and break us into even smaller fragments. These people haunt us and make it difficult for us to imagine that we’ll ever be whole, or manage to put the pieces into a right order.”

Jonathan was such a holy friend to David. So, look around you, to whom are you being called to be a holy friend?

The Rev. Dr. Ron Shive is the senior pastor of the First Presbyterian Church, Burlington. He may be reach at rshive@fpcburlington.org