Difficult to believe that this is the first writing on here since July 2018. Does that mean nothing has happened since then? No activity in my otherwise simple life? Absolutely not! Things are moving. Things are shaking.

I have become acutely aware of many signs of aging, as I go along on my merry way each day. I try to keep things simple, and pretty much do so. I get outside at least once each day. Don’t always go too far, but that’s just me right now. No entanglements with persons of the opposite sex, except for my brother, son, and a few others now and then. But nothing earthshaking or life-changing.

These six quiet months have been needed in my formerly busy brain. Realizations, discoveries, reflections, decisions… all of those wrapped up neatly in a pouch of life. My pouch of life.

I recently took up a 30 day challenge to do a Stitch Meditation each day — however long it takes, whatever medium I choose, as long as it involves hand stitching a 5″ block of whatever. It’s been amazing!! Even the squirrels don’t rile me like they used to. I used to go stomping over to the patio door, yelling all the way at these animals who were trespassing on my fence top or roaming around the concrete walkways. Now, you understand my patio is only 12′ by 12′ or so. It’s my only private outdoor space in my current living quarters. And it’s MINE! I do share with the odd hummingbird or the occasional flutterby. I have even used chili powder atop the fence to ward off the creepy animals. It works wonders, except when the rain is torrential. Then, I have to reapply, or tolerate.

I’ll try to attach the photo in a minute. See how much I forget in 6 months?

As for traveling… not on the cards. Several issues prevent me from flying — on a plane, and my car is now 17 years old, and not what I am willing to drive to Washington, Oklahoma, or any other desired holiday destination. So I rearrange furniture, move art pieces around, use a different quilt on the bed… you know the deal.

I don’t feel stuck, just not exactly right.

This is today’s 5″ block for you to peruse.

I do enjoy writing things down, but have recently been using paper and pen. I might come back here sooner than 6 months.

For now… in the words of Jackie Gleason in The Honeymooners… harry verderchi.

I know it takes more than that to get where you want to go, but at least I’m getting started. Again. Before I can actually decide where I want to be, I have to make that decision about whether or not I want to move “away” from my son. He’s doing well in his new-ish job, and has no intentions to move out of California, let alone Sacramento! I, on the other hand have not done any traveling outside Sacramento County in three — yes 3 years. As you know, for me that is very strange.

Many things have happened in those three years, but that’s another story for another time. Am I staying in a place that’s getting cost prohibitive to ever think of moving again just for a once-in-a-while meet-up with my son, brother and family, cousins with whom I meet up once a year… or am I moving to a place and space that will allow me to establish myself in a new community with possibilities. Do those possibilities exist here? Am I overlooking and avoiding something?

Even in searching through cohousing places around the US, I am so disappointed that the prices have soared in the past year alone. Nothing in California within my severely limited price range, and only a few spaces available in other desirable (for me) states.

I suppose I will await my landlord’s moves to sell this place so I HAVE TO move on. He’s rather slow, and also a known procrastinator, so even though he’s nearly my age and not considering purchasing any more income-boosting rentals, is he considering selling? That will probably take another 3-5 years. And who knows what the heck I’ll be doing by then.

The other day, I thought that tricking myself into thinking I was going to move within an undetermined amount of time would get me to attack the contents of this place with new energy and vigor. Alas, my mind found out that I was trying to trick myself and took over with a vengeance — in the form of inaction.

Perhaps I have to run out of clay and fabric and every other art-related thing in my space before I will consider making a move. I don’t purchase many items any more, as I truly have everything I need. No need for more sheets and towels — there’s only me, and there is a washer and dryer provided in this place, so I don’t even have to think of that. I can do my laundry at midnight, and nobody cares!

I’m getting a little off my topic — I know, when did I ever stay on a topic? It’s all related, though… from moving, to traveling, to getting a new car, to packing to put my stuff in storage so that I can roam a bit in my new car, when I get it. See what I mean? One large decision must be made to get the freaking ball rolling.

I don’t want to go very far — like not back to England or Hawaii, or the like. Just down the road… just up the coast… just over to the southwest a bit… would be just fine. But here I sit, unmoved by anything. Could I be fine? Not having a destination in mind actually is strange for me. Is this what happens to people when they get comfortable? I don’t remember ever being comfortable. I’ve always known that I am in that particular space for a few years at most, after which it’s time to move on. Hey… never said that before! That’s obviously today’s revelation.

No in-progress photos today; no finished project photos. Just words. Now I have to go think about the revelation.

I really can’t believe it’s been so long since I’ve been around this spot. Nothing major has caused this to happen. I suppose my willingness to write in public has not been there, so I use another stream of social media to get my thoughts out.

So, as usual, I am still experiencing major creative spurts, such as the one yesterday and today that resulted in what you see below. It is a small piece that was inspired by a friend who said those words. I didn’t hear anything else she said for quite a while. I knew what I had to do.

Well, it’s obvious that I need to be here more often, as my photo of the new little fabric piece which is 11″ x 13″ by the way, will appear somewhere on this page, whether it’s at the top, within the text, or… well, it could be just about anywhere.

And with that, darlings, I’ll toddle off again, as I’m starting the journal-making process in a minute. Haven’t done that for a while, either, so it will most likely take me at least twice as long as usual.

As a result of a comment I made the other day, someone asked me to — or was it challenged me to — write under the title, “When you’re as old as I am…”. Explanation? I have been wanting to write more lately, and realize that I don’t mind writing for my public. That’s a joke, son. So, without further ado, I shall once again subtitle my original blog, and not start another one, just in case some creature or other out there would like to go back to the year naught and read my very dull history.

You may even get the periodic update on the creative side of my current life. After all, that’s where I spend my days lately… at the work table surrounded by fabrics, clay, paper, yarn, beads, and what have you.

If I have promised you something in the past, let me know, as my memory has its own delete button these days, and frequently doesn’t let me know it has been done.

As for you, Craftwhack, aka Jeanette ( I like to call her CW), let’s start here and see where it takes us. It’s her request. There.

I’m leaving you with a piece I made in honor of my dad, Norman Sahmaunt, a proud Marine veteran, who left us in 2012.

I should begin with an apology of sorts. My posts here have dwindled to all but nothing over the past 9, nearly 10 months. E-mailing one person has taken over my words here, but today, realizing the need for me to write brings me to the brink of tears. I used to love writing here. That experience will begin again today. Whether there are now, or ever will be any readers is inconsequential. This is a place where I will once again put into the universe my thoughts and maybe even some of my horrors.

I have been wanting to publish my thoughts anonymously somewhere… or perhaps not even publish — just write. I can’t get motivated to do that. So for now, I shall enter a few thoughts daily, as well as a photo or two of the creative part of my life for you to peruse.

Starting with my current fabric piece, I’ll offer a few quick pics just to catch you up on my thoughts. Lately, I’ve noticed that certain times of the year breed thoughts and color combinations that have occurred in the past at precisely the same times.

I’ll be back tomorrow with some more random thoughts and a pic or two. Glad you’re there.

Here, dear friends, are two minor blocks — 22 and 23. I’m not enthusiastic about these two, as my hands were cold, and my mind was elsewhere when I was working on them.

Block 22 — I noticed that one person (at least) changed the label to TRAILERS. Didn’t think it was crucial, having lived in England, as you know.

Here’s Block 23.

Ii also realized that some people are using writing pens for the words, instead of my humble embroidery as in the one above. Eleven letters in a space is rather difficult to estimate where the second “I” will occur!

This afternoon, everything was getting to me — all the work since reading Marie Kondo’s book was getting to me, so I found I had to stop everything and do something rather more calming. Here’s the result — another of my coloring book experiences.

Didn’t work on my own design fabric piece today at all. I did move it from one side of the table to the other, just to get it out of the way of the other work I was doing. I think it’s time to get back to it tomorrow. Man, this clearing, sorting, tossing, deciding stuff is great, but takes a lot of energy — it’s mental energy, you know.

Need some food. Haven’t had caffeine for a few weeks, minimum carbs for a few days. Today I heard that you shouldn’t do a low fat low carb diet. You need more fats with you cut back the carbs. Is that correct?

Downton Abbey is on in less than an hour. I do wish I had a comfy chair in this room so that I could really enjoy it in a more comfortable seating place. One day, I’ll get a small love seat for the purpose. Until then, it’s sit at the work table!

Ok, ok, so I’m missing a day or two here and there. I do have trouble getting to this blog during the daylight hours. Why? No clue. Perhaps too much else packed into the days?

Here are the two sparse blocks:

Rather unimpressive, right? I was getting tired of using someone else’s pattern, as is my usual problem.

These are corners from the second round of blocks. I am now, also supposed to have the first nine made into the central block. Oops. Haven’t done that yet. I don’t mean to be a negative Nellie — apologies to all Nellies out there — but it’s cold, rainy, and I want to go out. That’s a switch!

Yesterday, I received the patterns for blocks 22 through 28. They are printed and ready to be done. I’ll do block 22 this afternoon, and stay with the program. I have the fabric kit destined for this quilt. I still love the idea of the quilt, as well as the design, just feeling pushed about it. I saw a post on facebook from a woman who has already finished the seven patterns she received yesterday. I’m sure she’s not the only one. I will continue to reiterate that this is a block-a-day project; that’s about all I can muster.

Can you tell I’m tired? Do I have too many things to deal with?

Yesterday, I bought some ice cream and cake. Only 6 days late for my birthday. I didn’t even enjoy it, I’m getting so critical of sugary products that it’s crazy. Used to be able to sit down and eat a whole pint of ice cream. No longer. But that’s a good thing.

I obviously need a nap. So that’s where I’m going… not outside — oh geez, one of my sheets is still in the dryer. Foiled again!

Wish I could sleep at night, but I keep hearing that’s what happens when you get old(er). Get up and pee, back to sleep, get up and p, back to sleep… and depending upon what time it is by then, it’s either get up and stay up or get up, p and back to bed. I go to bed later and later so I don’t have to get up so many times a night. What kind of logic is that? Or is it even logic?