Friday, March 30, 2012

Sunday:Deciding where to start yesterday, I thought maybe begin with a refresher on personal boundaries. So that is where I began, after swishing off most of the bedding with my hands, I cleaned her feet and got a big clue that I was right. She picked her feet up fine, but after cleaning she took them back and stomped them into the ground. So we worked on that. "I will manipulate this foot and your shoulder will relax and then I will put it down."

Then we walked. "You will walk where I say. You will stop when I say. You will take a step back when I say."

Mostly: "You are not my hat so you will not walk on top of me.

"I know this is not your favorite place on the ranch, but the rules still apply."

Then back to the stall, "You thought we were going in but we are walking past this time."

When we were back, I tool off the halter and scratched her in her favorite places.

It killed my body. I went home and just watched TV for the rest of the day. The boys had to cook their own dinner.

Tuesday:We are still here at Square One. Monday I did not even take her out. I went in to her 25x50 foot paddock. "When you turn your back to me, I will make you move away.""I will not do anything if you look at me, if you turn away, I will make you walk away."

It took about 40 minutes for her to turn her body toward me and I went up to her and scratched her and gave her long slow pets. Then put her halter on. More scratching and massage.

Step forward from a light touch, one step. More long pets. Another step or two, more pets. A step back from a light touch on the halter and a voice command, More pets. More massage.

"If I touch you lightly here, will you move your head to me?" "If I touch you lightly here, will you put your head down?"

"Walk on" around me in a circle. "Whoa. Stand." more pets. More circles. More massage.

This is all we did for Monday. Repeat on Tuesday with the first part shortened to about 5 minutes, with a short walk out, a bit of graze, some stop and chat.

Wednesday:Yesterday, when I got there, several other people were there. I talked to them. Yndi was hiding around the corner behind the stall. After several minutes, she came out to see me through the fence.She asked: "Aren't you going to catch me?"

This time, when I went it, she turned her back, I asked her to move away....same old same old....she went about 15 feet before she turned around.

We did the usual, then went for a walk. I took her just to where she was anxious and circled back and just to where she was anxious and circled back. Each time stopping often to ask things of her or stopping to talk to people and she just had to hang out.

This doesn't seem like a lot, but I spent nearly two hours with her.

We are SO FAR from long linning! If we can move forward to the place where everyone is starting, it will be a big deal.

Thursday:Yesterday morning..... I arrived and called out to her. She was hiding in her paddock behind the stall. I cleaned a little in the stall. No Yndi.

I got the halter and went out back to get her. She looked at me and began to walk away, so I did nothing, just looked into the distance. She circled around me two times.....turned 90 degrees and came to me and stopped.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Yndi and I are back to Square One. I am not sure what happened. Perhaps I was too absorbed in the progress we had made to notice the slipping before it was too late. Perhaps it was an attack of marishness and poniness. Good thing she is not a chestNUT!

She is shedding, but there is so much hair to shed that it is going to take a long time. The silver over-hair is shedding first, so she appears much darker.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

I bought a vendor space. Now I have to get ready.Chris, of Jax Snacks* is sharing the space.It will help to have two pairs of eyes. Diana of The Qi Papers*, is going to meet me in the morning to help set up, mostly to watch my stuff after I set up and leave to park my car. Most importantly, because I like her and don't get to see her in person very often.I am busy. Also, I have been plagued by migraines. Thankfully, I have Replax to head them off at the pass, but that means a lot of early mornings, followed by afternoon fatigue.My other distraction: Pony Love!*Both have ETSY shops

Friday, March 16, 2012

My email got hijacked. Probably through my iPod Touch. It's new, I couldn't figure out how to log out of email. I finally did, though not elegantly.

I was missing Maggie again. Why do I miss Maggie more than I miss Janow?

I had Janow for 18 years. Eighteen years as I journeyed from 32 years old with a 4 year old horse.

Then I was 50 with a 22 year old horse. Janow wore his heart on his sleeve.

Sometimes Gregarious, sometimes Grumpy.

Janow had chronic laminitis for years. He foundered a couple of times. I knew that laminitis would probably cause his ending. When it did, 18 years of my past ended.

You own your past.

Nobody can take it.

I had Maggie for only six months.I invested a lot, emotionally and financially, to changing my sense of self from Janow's rider to Maggie's driver.

Maggie was the plan for the next 18 years. I would be 68, Maggie 36. Gotlands and people often live that long.Poor Maggie. She was nine when she was finally purchased from the breeder. She was a funky looking pony, described as "a little bit boring." Maggie took everything is stride. She was tender and affectionate. To me, she was beautiful.

Oh God, she was so beautiful.

My Pony Girl.

My Plain Brown.

When she died, 18 years of my future was stolen. My sense of self was gone.

I was swimming. Yndi was swimming. A broodmare at 16, the economy and her age were not in her favor. Joyce was determined to get her to a good place and joined us up. Was Maggie's tender affection a Gotland trait?

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Yesterday, rain, Dr. appointment, getting ready for Pregnant Mare Rescue Swap meet, sad sore foot, all interfere with life. Not to mention an incompatibility of my old Photoshop and the new Windows Vista.Today, another Dr appointment, more rain forecast, and trying to dye sweatshirts outside. The rain is not the thing, the cold that comes with it makes it miserable. Wind advisory might make it harder. Lots harder.