The rest of you, come closer so I can explain… You know those
little caramel-flavoured biscuits you get with your cappuccino at
the hairdresser's? They are called Lotus Biscoff,
and one day an evil genius at their HQ said: 'I
know - why don't we take these little biscuit
things, crush them and add candy sugar syrup, raising agent,
rapeseed oil, sugar, emulsifier and citric acid, and create the
best spread that ever existed?'

So now you can actually buy a spread made from biscuits to put
on toast and crumpets (and biscuits, if tautology's your thing).
You can mix it into cake icing or simply eat it from the jar like a
hideous human version of Winnie the Pooh.

It's sickly-sweet and, frankly, there's probably more
nutritional worth in your lipstick, but to try it is to love it.
Oh, and it's also been turned into a limited-edition Krispy Kreme.
Sorry.

:: Lotus Biscoff spread, £2.25 from Tesco, and various other stockists