Tuesday, June 13, 2006

[Some crazy-ass study sez] both young people and older people think that young people are happier than older people — when in fact research has shown the opposite.

Am I happier now or was I happier then? Wrong! Survey says: Happier now! Regardless of what bullshit my stupid mood and affect spew! This is good news. I had no idea how goddamn much my life had improved with age and baldness.

OK ...

(EDITOR'S NOTE: I know I'm misreading and misconstruing the press release, but it helps my humorous premise to do so, so bear with me)

... so, according to this study, people are happier when they're older, but they don't know they are, and believe they must have been happier when they were younger? ........... uhh, something seems screwy here. You can be happy without knowing it?

I guess that makes sense. Otherwise, they wouldn't have written that song to go, "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands," because it would be redundant if you automatically know it when you're happy. And "If you're happy, clap your hands" fucks up the whole meter and other music-theory shit.