Just when you thought the election would signal an end to all the fecal-slinging nuttery of the right, and just when I thought inspiration was a fleeting commodity, I awoke to find out, yes Michele Bachmann, there is a Santa Claus – and his name is Ron Weiser, former RNC finance chair.

If only Jeff Foxworthy weren’t knocking it out of the ballpark doing celebrity roasts of Larry the Cable Guy and trying to prove that American students aren’t stupid, just American adults, he’d have Weiser to thank for a slew of material that almost writes itself.

If you perpetuate stereotypes of blacks as lazy….you might be a racist.

If you think all African Americans hang out in pool halls….you might be a racist.

If you think all urban voters are black and vote multiple times….you might be a racist – but you’re definitely not from Cleveland, because God knows people aren’t waiting in those lines more than once.

According to this story, Weiser, who was speaking a Tea Party function, later indicated that his comments were not “intended” to be racist. So, let’s at least give the guy some credit for over-achieving. He can drop some old school Mississippi-circa-mid-’60s-racism while not even trying.

But, not content to simply crawl under a rock until the news cycle moved on, Weiser drew more attention to himself by pulling the classic GOP double down and claiming there’s no negative connotation to either beer or pool halls. This foolish game of segregating the offensive part of a remark without acknowledging the context of the slur is almost as insulting as the comments themselves.

Or maybe it’s all just a misunderstanding. Maybe Weiser was simply advocating for early voting when he said, ‘‘But if you’re not from Detroit, the places where those pool halls and barbershops are, you’re not going to be going out at 6:30 in November. Not without a side arm.’’

Of course, if you can freely juxtapose “Detroit,” “barbershop,” and “sidearm” you might be a racist.