Just married, TTC and anxious

I’m 30, just married, not rich but well off. Have horrible periods so hubby and I have decided to TTC to see.

Period was on the 11th so fertile window is well….now… we did the deed the 13th-20th and will again tonight. At my age there’s like a 15% or something chance so it’s not that high, yet I still feel anxiety….if I do, then life changes, if I don’t then I worry I’m broken or something. I don’t know…

I’m 30 and we started TTC about 9 months ago right before I turned 30. 30 seems to be a big scary number when it comes to TTC. I’m in my 10th cycle TTC now, and yes, I worry and have anxiety that something is wrong, but also know that the odds are in my favor. We want to have a baby so badly, but at times we do still worry about whether or not we are “ready”…it’s only natural to worry about something that will change your life.

If you haven’t started tracking your cycles yet, I’d say try that. Fertility friend is a good free app for TTC. Temping and charting works well to help determine when you are truly ovulating, and there are a ton of supportive boards in the TTC forum you can join. Good luck TTC!

searock: Since you are only on your first cycle trying there is no need to jump to conclusions that even if you dont get pregnant something is wrong. When you get closer to a year TTC you may start to wonder. If your periods are a cause for concern a discussion with your doctor would make sense. Good luck.

I’ve actually charted for over a year, can predict ovulation pretty well (STM method). The doctors just pushed birth control which I didn’t want as it’s horrible chemicals and my biological mom died of cancer that the dr suspects was triggered by the artifical hormones.

The only dr that didn’t push birth control just said that since I was so regular just get preg and that should help my issues.

I had kidney surgery earlier in the year so my charting is a bit messed up, but it’s more or less been normal.

I’m 29 and it took me about 5 months after going off BC to get pregnant.. My biggest piece of advice is almost impossible to follow, but don’t fret if it doesn’t happen right away. For some people, it does, for others, it’s normal to take 6+ months to conceive. I won’t tell you to just “relax and have fun trying” because that’s what I heard and it was not helpful because I couldn’t just relax! But anyway, be good to yourself and to your DH.. good luck!

your odds of getting pregnant don’t drop drastically until you’re near 40. Any woman has a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month, even with perfect timing. So you’re nonworse off than a 20 year old.

I I got pregnant for the first time at 38 and had my baby girl 10 weeks ago when I was 39. No issues. No complications. Perfect little girl 🙂

Mrs.Sawyertobe: That’s the hard part. I have very little idea of family history. I know that for the most part they had no trouble (my bio dad was 1 of 9 and my bio mom was 1 of 5) but they all had kids VERY young….early to mid 20’s.

searock: Please do not worry about your age. It makes me so sad to see young women worry about that. Somehow this unfair, incorrect message has gotten out there that fertility drastically declines at some pre-determined age that is the same for us all. It’s different for every woman but most of us are still fertile into our 40s.

I for one have had two pregnancies & each was the result of slipping up ONCE while using intercourse avoidance during fertile time to prevent pregnancy. But to be honest, since I slipped up twice & both times, I got pregnant, I’ll call it NTNP as I obviously wasn’t trying that hard to prevent. I got pregnant with DD at 38 & am currently 40 y/o & 13 weeks with #2. Although unplanned, we were & are very happy about both…

Give yourself a year & if nothing happens, see a doctor. These boards can be overwhelming but most of us get pregnant with no problem.

Mrs.Sawyertobe: I agree that genetics may play a role. My mom, both grans, several aunts, my sister & I have all easily gotten pregnant into our 30s & 40s. No one in my family has strugled with fertility that I know of & no one is childless past the age of 40. We joke that it’s the Irish or French-Canadian in us. Both cultures are known to have many, many children including past 40.