How Trauma Is Carried Across Generations

Holding the secret history of our ancestors.

What is overwhelming and unnamable is passed on to those we are closest to. Our loved ones carry what we cannot. And we do the same.

This is the subject of Lost in Transmission: Studies of Trauma Across Generations, edited by M. Gerard Fromm (2012). This collection of essays on traumatic transmission builds on the idea that “what human beings cannot contain of their experience—what has been traumatically overwhelming, unbearable, unthinkable—falls out of social discourse, but very often on to and into the next generation as an affective sensitivity or a chaotic urgency.”

The transmission of trauma may be particular to a given family suffering a loss, such as the death of an infant, or it can be a shared response to societal trauma.

Maurice De Witt, a sidewalk Santa on Fifth Avenue noticed a marked change in behavior the holiday season following 9/11 when parents would not “let the hands of their children go. The kids sense that. It’s like water seeping down, and the kids can feel it... There is an anxiety, but the kids can’t make the connections.”

“This astute man was noticing a powerful double message in the parent’s action,” Fromm says. “Consciously and verbally, the message was 'Here’s Santa. Love him.' Unconsciously and physically, it was 'Here’s Santa. Fear him.' The unnamed trauma of 9/11 was communicated to the next generation by the squeeze of a hand.”

Psychic legacies are often passed on through unconscious cues or affective messages that flow between child and adult. Sometimes anxiety falls from one generation to the next through stories told.

Psychohistorian Peter Loewenberg recalls the oral tradition of his parents who lived through the hunger years in Germany during the First World War when the physical health and stature of a generation was stunted due to prolonged malnutrition. According to their stories, a once-a-year indulgence was an orange segmented and apportioned among the entire family. Loewenberg further identifies a cause chain between physical privations of the German people during WWI, which culminated in the Great Depression (1929), and the Nazi appeal to children of Central Europe. To what extent did “the passive experiences of childhood starvation” lead to a reversal and fantasied “undoing” through the hunger regimen and cruelty of the concentration camps? (Lowenberg, 61)

The Phoenix Kimono, painting by Arthur Hunter-Blair

He cites another example of group transmission and its reversal. "The greatest Chinese historical trauma was undoubtedly the humiliation of the Japanese Imperial land” (1937-1945). When Chairman Mao Zedong proclaimed the People’s Republic in 1949 and said “The Chinese People have stood up!” he was repairing historical shame and hurt.

Psychohistorian Howard Stein takes up the topic of collective trauma in America and imagines all the possible directions trauma can be transmitted in nations, ethnic groups, religions, and families. Trauma can be transferred in "vertical" direction, for example, in the brutal downsizing of a corporation. This is also the case in a leadership change at a local church after a pastor has been accused of sexual misconduct.

Stein articulates "horizontal" transmission as the circulation of injury among people in more equivalent powers relations. This is often the experience of health professionals working with victims of large scale disaster, such as the Oklahoma City bombing (1995), who suffer the empathy of witnessing second-hand. Vertical and lateral transmissions may happen concurrently, in relation to the same event.

Traumatic transmission ferries out unacknowledged grief along multiple vectors. Stein says mourning is "short-circuited," groups become "stuck" in time, and collective solidarity is created in the process.

Transmission is the giving of a task. The next generation must grapple with the trauma, find ways of representing it and spare transmitting the experience of hell back to one's parents. A main task of transmission is to resist disassociating from the family hertiage and "bring its full, tragic story into social discourse." (Fromm, xxi)

Often one child within a family is nominated to both carry and communicate the grief of their predecessors. There was a man who entered a Holocaust Museum requesting that the institution keep the remains of the tattooed serial number taken from his arm. The chosen child is analogously charged with the mission of keeping the family heritage, being a “holding environment.”

How do we carry secret stories from before our lifetimes?

Transgenerational transmissions take on life in our in dreams, in acting out, in “life lessons” given in turns of phrase and taught us by our family. Discovering transmission means coming to know and tell a larger narrative, one from the preceding generation. It requires close listening to the stories of our parents and grandparents, with special attention to the social and historical milieu in which they lived -- especially its military, economic and political turmoil.

The emotional ties between child and ancestors are essential to the development of our values. These bonds often determine the answers to myriad questions such as: “Who am I?” "Who am I to my family?” “Who can ‘we’ trust” and who are our enemies?” “What ties me to my family?” And, most importantly, “of these ties, which do I reject and which to I keep?" (Barri Belnap, 127)

How does one discharge this mission? It is a precarious terrain of finding one's way through a web of familial loyalties to which one has been intensely faithful. The working through of transmission entails a painful, seemingly unbearable, process of separation. It can become an identity crisis, the breaking of an emotional chain. As Fromm puts it, “something life defining and deeply intimate is over.” The child speaks what their parent could not. He or she recognizes how their own experience has been authored, how one has been authorized, if unconsciously, to carry their parents’ injury into the future. In rising above the remnants of one's ancestors' trauma, one helps to heal future generations.

I'm sure there's a psychological component to the transmission of trauma down through the generations. I also believe that there's some sort of epigenetic, elemental formulation.

Recently I went on a 'roots' journey. There was a deep void in family history and I went looking to fill in the gaps.

What I found trumped all the years and years of trying to make sense psychologically of family dynamics and quirks. I discovered the circumstances and particular hardships of 4, 5 and 6 generations back made complete sense of my family experiences now.

On a lighter note, I also learnt why I have definite food tastes without knowing how they arose! This suggests a deeply physical connection down the generations to me.

Just wondering... how is this possible when anyone who would know the details has been gone for decades? Please note: I'm not questioning your veracity, I sincerely would like to know how you were able to find out such things.

Yes, apologies, now that I've reread it I can see that I didn't explain too well.

What I meant was that I spent a couple of months in the area where my ancestors lived for many generations - perhaps a thousand years (at least we can trace direct ancestors in the area to c. 1000CE).

It is a wild, remote, sparsely populated, weatherbeaten region. Even to this day the people who live there (many of whom I'm distantly related to I discovered) work harder than I've seen any other first world residents.

They're far more physically and apparently psychologically resilient, hardy, resourceful, self-reliant and self-responsible, fiercely independent and live plain lives with far fewer of the illusions, delusions and snares of more comfortable climes. Hence, their approach to life and others is plain spoken, resolutely calm, slower (yet everything gets done!) and absent of guile. It really is a very different way of life - and one which most people, habituated to mainstream and city life, probably couldn't take to.

It was also possible to learn some of those details of which you write. There are still older people around who remember various snippets, albeit at some remove, because most people are somehow distantly related. There are also many written records that the mainstream is just not interested in - they're only of interest to the relatively sparse population and their far flung cousins like me, so they stay there.

I stood in houses where my folks had been born and died over centuries. I traveled the paths (literally paths) and little roads they had to trek regularly for work and play. For all the hardships of their lives though, there was the complete stability of knowing 'their country', 'their land' and the sure knowledge of some degree of blood relationship to every family across hundreds of square miles around. We have absolutely no sense of any of this in cities. It's a massive, even terminal loss to civilization in my opinion.

I understood completely once I'd lived there for a while why my parents and their parents and grandparents and further back had been as they were. I understood much more about why I am as I am with the particular set of character traits that I have.

Much is learnt behavior and values that are so strong that they have been passed down - just as I;ve passed them to my children, quite unthinkingly. But also, that sort of life, on the fringes and at the raw end of civilization, literally breeds people who have certain physical and psychological characteristics. One would not survive to reproduce otherwise. So, a good part is also, I believe, literally inbred. In the genes. (And, on a very practical note, now I know why I function far better on certain types of foods - those which my ancestors were raised on!)

Does this explain more about the points I was trying to make? In any case, I feel very blessed that I have this strong heritage and that I can see and understand how it's shaped me and indeed my own children (as a side note, their other parent has roots in this area too - although we met and married in a big city, far away and our common ancestral connections to this remote area weren't of any conscious interest until much later).

I really appreciate what you've shared about tracing your family inheritance. I've seen ways of accessing information through Family Constellations which is breathtaking and this is a very different route and just as interesting. Thank you!

With the healing method of Family Constellations, the natural flow of love with the life force, which was blocked by the trauma, can be restored to the ancestors and throughout the generations of the family lineage. Representatives for the ancestors are chosen in service to the healing of the family, and act as vessels for the ancestral spirits, which can then interact and resolve the stuck places that kept love and full emotional health from passing down to the children. Interestingly, this can work for both the victims and perpetrators of wounds and injustices. It is seen in this work that the children of the perpetrators are often afflicted with the guilt of their ancestors actions and suffer as intensely as the victims. The work of scientists in epigenetics is putting a foundation to this ancient healing method, and the work of biologist Rupert Sheldrake and many others are showing how morphogenetic fields are propagating these inherited, non-physical traits and memories.

One must firstly be willing to be in this state of mind, that of seeking the truth for reasons, answers and explanations. This then must be followed by asking questions, and asking the right-kind of questions. Thank you for the great comments above, to make this a terrific article and reference.

These massive traumas and their continuing impact across generations are discussed in the literature on the transmission of trauma. See Eddie Taylor's book "Restoring the Mind of Black America," and the writings of Maurice Apprey of UVA for reflections on the African-American experience of transgenerational transmission. Also please refer to Howard Stein cited in my article for his work with Native-Americans and then follow the citations in these authors' bibliographies.

Ejn wrote:

Any thoughts on the traumatic impact of American slavery on African Americans today?
Any thoughts on how trauma impacts Native Americans today?
Any thoughts on why these two events are not discussed in association with generational trauma/developmental trauma?

It has been a 25 year journey for my study on the impact of
the experiences from utero through older adulthood and
have personally used the work of Candice Pert (Molecules
of Emotion), Upledger, and Gary Zukav to demonstrate that this is due to our DNA. I personally discovered that the
ancestral history of uterine trauma was passed on to me,
and since having a hysterectomy having a much better
relationship with my body. More time on the experiences
of African-Americans is critical. Additionally, the exposure
to violence against African-Americans by police is another
source of repeated trauma. It is all connected and it makes
an excellent case for reparations of some sort, up to and
including mental healthcare.

I am doing a piece for my capstone project on Native Americans, generational trauma and how we can overcome, identify and start some sort of communication therapy. There seems to be a hush, hush about this.

Anonymous wrote:

Any thoughts on the traumatic impact of American slavery on African Americans today?

Any thoughts on how trauma impacts Native Americans today?

Any thoughts on why these two events are not discussed in association with generational trauma/developmental trauma?

Dear Denise,
Yes, there is a lot of cultural resistance in the US about discussing Native American historical trauma and that of African-Americans for several reasons I think. That would mean most Americans would have to acknowledge responsibility for the brutal offenses of their ancestors and also perhaps the possibility of reparations being made today.

I want to suggest one book "Restoring the Mind of Black America," by a colleague, Eddie Taylor. Among many things, he addresses how the assassinations of heroic black American leaders, such as Martin Luther King Jr., have developed into a process of complex mourning for blacks and therefore it is hard to work through these major losses of great leaders. As may know, when a loss or humiliation goes unmourned, it is passed on to the next generations in hopes that ones children will complete the process. See Dr. Taylor's website: http://www.eddietaylorphd.com/

Howard Stein, PhD, has written brilliantly on transgenerational trauma and, as I recall, worked with Native American populations. If you would like I can put you in touch with him and a discussion group I moderate with him and others more knowledgeable on the literature regarding these two populations and your important questions.

Best Regards,
Molly

Anonymous wrote:

I am doing a piece for my capstone project on Native Americans, generational trauma and how we can overcome, identify and start some sort of communication therapy. There seems to be a hush, hush about this.

Anonymous wrote:

Any thoughts on the traumatic impact of American slavery on African Americans today?

Any thoughts on how trauma impacts Native Americans today?

Any thoughts on why these two events are not discussed in association with generational trauma/developmental trauma?

I have literally stumbled upon your very informative text whilst I was looking for inter generational trauma because I believe that so far I have been/am the carrier of my family's trauma.

I know that my immediate family is severely dysfunctional even if they don't believe so but today I went deeper in my thinking and realised that I am carrying the trauma of my ancestors as well.I believe myself to be the family scapegoat and I also believe that in a way I 'chose ' the role because that was the only way to get'loved' in the family .

I believe myself because I have gone through hell in this family and I am wise enough to analyse myself and my thoughts.This makes so much sense to me and your article has helped.Thank you very much.

Hi londiwe i know its been a while since you commented but it struck me with your disfunctional family have you ever looked up narcissistic parent . It may give you a bit more insight to there disfunction ..

Hi Nicole,
Thank you for your insight.Yes, I have come to the conclusion that my mother was narcissistic.She died in January.I have come across the books of Alice Miller and other authors who talk about 'adult children ' .I strongly believe that my mother was that and so am I.I am in the process of working on growing myself up.Hard but there is hope for me.
Thank you again

My question is: How do we go about identifying this trauma that has been done to the Native Americans? What about the trauma from boarding schools. I am a third generation Boarding school trauma decedent. I have felt it, lived it, the lack of emotion, the silence, the lack of affection. How can we overcome this. I feel like this is the reason our tribe is in such turmoil. any suggestions on where I can find more information on this?
Thank You,
Denise, Ojibwa.

I've always wondered where my mothers trauma came from. She never spoke of her fathers family. We didn't even know of relatives on that side until after she died and death notices sent. I know my grandfather was a member of a very sexist generation. Mom was a part of the first large wave of professional women trying to balance careers and home. His negative attitudes towards women in the work place while explicitly supporting her efforts must have had a very negative impact on her self perception.
Which leads to a larger issue of violence towards women and girls. In a society where girls are pulled out of gym class and are taught in grade school how to watch their drinks at parties, carry their keys, etc. what sort of psychic damage and self sabotage do women develop? Avoiding going to a prestigious college because of the reputation of high sex crime rates, being unable to network with other professionals because it takes place and at times we have been taught are dangerous for us. And this anxiety affects all women, half of the worlds population, from suburban mothers letting their boys run free while they squeeze tighter their daughters hands to third world countries where going for firewood is risking a horrible death.
A frank discussion on the transference of gender and sexual attitudes from one generation to the next could expose the gears that propel sexism and family violence.

I am very interested in this field. My parents lost their home incl. everything they owned except the clothes they were wearing during WW2. My mother was a prisoner of war in Russia, her mother was murdered by the partisans, her brother who survived the war but was burnt alive upon crossing the border to what he still thought was his home country to reunite with his wife and child he was never able to see and more... I feel I took on a lot of my mom's family side of trauma.