Whether you are a
teacher, student, or a construction
worker we all have resources of outreach
and help. The hardest part in seeking
help is that initial first step. It can
take courage to face a problem but the
worst thing you can do is ignore it.
Whether you are depressed, have a
drinking problem, being bullied at
school, or what ever your dilemma is it's
important you talk to someone. Your most
reliable sources will be people like your
parents, school counselors, teachers, or
relatives. If you are in need of
professional help going to a therapist,
rehab, or a specialty institution can
having lasting positive effects.

Again,
it's the courage to get help that will
save yourself in the long run. It can
take a lot of trust to reach out for
help. People like your parents or
teachers have most likely been in a
similar position at one time in their
lives and can be a source of comfort and
advice in seeking help. I know from
personal experience being optimistic and
having a positive outlook will carry you
through hard times. In addition to
reaching out for help it's important to
find and embrace your anti-drug. For me
it was and still is skateboarding, music,
reading, movies, and more. I've said it
before and I will say it again, find your
natural highs they are everywhere.

What
can you do?

Equally important
as reaching out for help is the
importance of giving help. We all have
the unique ability to make a difference
anyway we can, big or small. From doing
volunteer work to the simple act of
giving a friend some good advice or
lending a caring ear. If you have a
friend or relative that you see going
down the wrong path or is sunk in
depression your simple act of lending
your voice and ear can help a great deal
in their road to recovery.

Hope and
optimism are both contagious. It takes
courage and bravery to seek help and the
same goes for giving help. But what's the
alternative? If we care enough about
someone or a group of individuals we
should take the initiative to give help.
Think of our mentors, teachers, doctors,
and so on. Those who give without thought
of reward, just the act of helping. There
is a cycle and a sense to it all. Do what
you can, where you can, to make a
difference.

The
Bully

Recently
I received a concerning email from a
young man. I had seen him a couple times
at the same indoor skatepark in my home
state. It was obvious he had his own
style and we always talked about being
original with our skateboarding. His
email started with, "I'm thinking of
quitting skateboarding." He was
being bullied and other skaters were
poking fun of his tricks and were
discouraging him from skating the way he
wanted to. The depression underneath the
paragraph was apparent. To me this wasn't
just about skateboarding. Although it
sickens me that something representing
freedom and creativity has a population
of people conforming and not accepting
diversity in people. When I got into
skating at the age of twelve it was to be
an individual, to be part of something
that had no rules or creative
limitations. Being a big advocate of
keeping skateboarding creative I
encouraged him to never stop and to focus
on what skating does for him personally.
We should never change ourselves because
someone or a group wants us to conform to
their narrow definition of what cool is.
As compassionate human beings we have a
responsibility to accept and understand
our differences. Innovation should be
celebrated in any art form and not
discouraged. A bullier or hater doesn't
understand empathy and there's something
within themselves causing them to be
insecure and ignorant. Stand strong and
be free to be yourself. It's a big world
out there, so get out there and skate
it... not hate it.

Doug Brown Random Notes:
1/14/13 - What's with all the "I hate my mom, my mom
is such a this or that" posts on Facebook? To see
these posts in a news feed saddens me. A few years ago I
was having a skate session with my friends and I heard a
disturbance at the far end of the skatepark. A crowd
began to circle around a shaken father and his teenage
daughter. She was yelling and cursing at the top of her
lungs being completely irrational. I took a leap of faith
and walked into the middle of her rant. I began by
telling her someday she will regret yelling at her father
like this. I told her how my mother passed away when I
was her age and I live in regret for a lot of the things
I said to her. I asked the girl, "Who paid for the
water for your shower today? Who paid for your breakfast
this morning? Who bought your shoes?" Her silent
reply to my questions were apparent on her stunned face.
I backed away and her tone towards her father completely
changed and their rant became a discussion appearing to
end in resolve. My intervention took courage, right or
wrong I was glad I did it. I've been there. We tend to
hurt the ones we love the most sometimes. When I was a
teen I would lash out to my mom, I see it now that it was
a hug in disguise. We were so alike and stubborn in our
ways. My parents put me through a lot, boot camps,
private schools, institutions, and more. As an adult I
don't hate them for putting me through that. Whether it
was right or wrong it has made me who I am today.
Adversity makes strong people. So to the kids posting how
much they hate their parents I ask you to question your
intentions. Remember what they've done for you and given
you, not what they haven't done or haven't given you.
Respect your parents and others.

11/20/12 - Just received an email from a mother thanking
me for inspiring her son. Stories like this are the real
paycheck in the back account of pride and purpose.
("Your posts are so inspirational to my son! He says
" wow, Doug brown does more than skate. He goes and
visits sick kids in the hospital and brightens their day!
I think that's pretty cool mom!" I said "
That's awesome, there should be more people like him in
this world and it would be a much better place" he
says "ima become famous and be like Doug Brown and
travel to hospitals to visit just to see kids."
Thanks for instilling a positive side in him and not even
knowing it! Thought I'd share to brighten your day.)

10/24/12 - Last night's event had a spark. What great
energy and an enthusiastic audience. My highschool
counselor Cherlyl Welch was there in attendance. I
haven't seen her since I graduated 20 years ago. She was
instrumental in helping me throughout my highschool
years, was a thrill to see her. I went to bed last night
with a feeling of satisfaction from the event. I had a
feeling of "I'm doing this, I'm out there reaching
people and making a difference in people's lives."
All the schools and libraries I've been speaking to this
fall, it's been unreal. The emails, the feedback from
parents, the look in the kids eyes when I can tell I've
reached them. I still continue to skate everyday and do
skate events but the power that microphone has in my
hands far outweighs anything I can do on a skateboard. It
was a joyous evening, many thanks to everyone that came
to the event.

11/26/12 - I don't have a big house. I don't have a lot
of money. I don't have a fancy car. I chose a path of
uncertainty and gamble. I've grabbed opportunities and
chance which led me to a plethora of memories and moments
that will last a lifetime. If you are chasing a dream
with fame and wealth as your destination of happiness you
may find yourself in a pool of unfulfillment. Our
primordial desire is to eat, to survive, and to continue.
I've seen money change people. How much does one need to
fill a void or create a mountain of possessions? In our
pursuit of happiness we should measure our success on
what we do, not what we have or accumulate. When I was 14
my parents sent me to a survival boot camp in Billings
Montana for three weeks. A ten person group with days
upon days of hiking with fifty found backpacks and
sunflower seeds for food. A three day solo expedition
with no food alone in the mountains among the wolves and
rattles snakes. That experience started my mental flight
towards knowing what really matters in life. People
matter, friends matter, family matters, and the little
things do matter. When you have less the little things
seem more. We won't be here forever folks. Spend your
days wisely and focus on the here and now and what really
matters.

A True Hero.
A friend of mine recommended I check out the documentary
Murderball. It is a film about paraplegics who play
full-contact rugby in wheelchairs. The USA team overcomes
unimaginable obstacles to compete in the Paralympic Games
in Athens, Greece. Staring in the Academy Award nominated
documentary is Mark Zupan. After watching the documentary
I was moved and educated on paraplegics. The mental
strength of these men and the stories they shared were
inspiring.
Little did I know that in the next two weeks I would
receive a call from my agent. She told me there was a
sixteen year old in the intensive care unit at Akron
Children's Hospital in Ohio that I was to visit, Michael
Cantu. Both Michael and his classmate were big fans of
mine. His friend was aware of my work with Athletes for
Hope. He contacted my agent and my agent contacted the
Cantu family. Thus the connection was made to visit
Michael immediately. Upon talking to his father, it was
established the visit would be a surprise. I would be
seeing him on the one week anniversary of his accident.
Michael sustained a very serious neck injury on the
evening of August 22nd, 2011 at a gymnastics training
facility. He broke four vertebrae in his neck and had
significant spinal cord damage. He had some movement in
both his left and right arms and even felt a little
pressure in one of his legs but that was it. Till this
point Michael had an average of twenty visitors a day to
visit him. Michael had a lust for life. He was very
active with sports and a social life that flourished with
friends.

Arriving at the hospital I made my way through the
winding halls to the intensive care unit. I was looking
pro skater like with my shiny new skateboard in hand. I
approached the nurse behind the busy desk and began to
tell her who I was. Before I could get my last name out
she smiled and said, You must be the skateboarder.
Hold on, I will call down Michael's father. I see
Mr. Cantu in a black jump suit making his way down the
hall. In a whisper fashion, he tells me how excited
Michael will be. His fists are clamped and he has a
kinetic energy about him. In a giddy manner he jumps up
and down. Right away I know this will be something
special and his father may be more excited about this
than he will be. Both parents have been his cheerleader
every second of this long frazzled week. His father has
been by his side since the arrival that fateful night.
Mr. Cantu is the dad of all dads. He is an author and
accomplished musician. Creativity is part of his being
and no doubt bleeds through his ability to be a father.
As we continue to walk towards his room the dialog of
excitement builds. Thank you for coming I can't
thank you enough for doing this! still in the
whisper fashion of excitement.

Taking a sharp left, I enter the room to where Michael's
eyes are wide as can be saying Oh wow. Man, dude,
thanks for coming, wow, oh man. Instant good vibes
from Michael. You know when you first meet someone and
they have that quality of instant friendship? That's how
I felt with him. No dead air, no awkward silence. We got
all the obvious necessities of the conversation out of
the way. He gave me the go ahead to talk about how he
landed in this position and what the status was.
Mentally, Michael was doing amazing. He had a great
attitude and positive outlook. As he told one of the
physicians "I got myself into this mess and I need
to get myself out of it." His positive attitude has
been an inspiration to everyone. I laid it on pretty
thick about how the power of his mind will save him
indeed. We talked for well over an hour about the power
of hope and the foundation of positive thinking. He
didn't miss a beat. He was in the moment.
A week ago, he was able to run across the room or pick up
a pencil. This day, his mind was the sole power of where
he was going to go. It's a true test of human being. Mid
way through the visit, a nurse came in to check on
things. Face to face nearly touching noses with Michael
the nurse asks if he needs anything. After she leaves, I
say Does the killing you with kindness overkill
drive you crazy? He replies with relief Yes!
You have no idea! Yes. Continuing talking with him
Mr. Cantu interrupts our dialog This guy gets it
(referring to me) he just gets it. I reply I
try. We can never know what it's like to be in Michael's
position, but we can try to understand. It's easier
to empathize with someone that has a broken foot or a
splitting headache. This was on a level that no one could
imagine unless they've experienced it first hand. He even
spoke of the cute nurses that would come to his aid if he
needed a drink of water or the change of a TV channel.
The wheels were already turning quickly with Michael and
his father. Mr. Cantu was busy doing research on his
phone and laptop finding high tech ways for quadriplegics
to use computers and function in this world.
I brought my normal supplies of freebies, including
posters, but I figured the audio version of my book
containing three CDS would be a good match for
entertainment for him. Both father and son were pleased.
In addition, I brought the DVD documentary of Murderball.
I knew Micheal would connect with the star of the film
Mark Zupan. Both athletes were aggressive men with their
eye on the ball. In this case Michael's eye is on his
future and to tackle what we take for granted. Our lives
can change in the blink of an eye. After signing a couple
of his posters and taking some photos it was time to
leave. This visit lasted longer than my usual hospital
visits. We were fluent in Star Wars, music and pop
culture conversation. Mr. Cantu is in a band. Their house
has the drum set and all the toys it takes for a good jam
session. I assured them both that there will be a reunion
soon, along with a jam session on guitars. The maturity,
strength, and optimism Michael had was truly remarkable.
There was a reciprocal understanding in our conversations
that no matter what happens in the future this isn't the
end. His life can take many different directions, but his
state of mind and amazing resources will be key in his
journey.

The father's love for his son was something to see. He is
surrounded by many friends and a family that loves him.
For me, all I could give were my words of encouragement
and support along with bringing a smile into the room. I
had entered the room as the pro skater guy and left being
a friend to him and his father. I left with a sense of
fulfillment and pride to see that already a week into
this tragic dilemma they were going in full force with
optimism being center stage.
Through lots of physical therapy, Michael went to the
Metro Health Spinal Cord Injury Rehabilitation Center.
Over time he has become able to use his knuckles to
change songs on his music player. He has become a hero to
many throughout his school and community. Local media has
been helping the family's efforts to raise money. Friends
of the Cantus' and Michael's classmates have hosted fund
raisers along with selling tee shirts and wristbands to
help with expenses. After spending one hundred and fifty
seven days in a hospital/skilled nursing facility,
Michael finally made it home sweet home. He is back in
school, with his new chair.
Michael's story is far from over. I told him he was like
a brand new car with a strong battery. His mind is the
computer of his system that is beyond remarkable. The
mind is capable of miraculous achievement. We are all on
that road with our minds behind the wheel taking us to
our survival and happiness.

The
Bully
Recently I received a concerning email from a young man.
I had seen him a couple times at the same indoor
skatepark in my home state. It was obvious he had his own
style and we always talked about being original with our
skateboarding. His email started with, "I'm thinking
of quitting skateboarding." He was being bullied and
other skaters were poking fun of his tricks and were
discouraging him from skating the way he wanted to. The
depression underneath the paragraph was apparent. To me
this wasn't just about skateboarding. Although it sickens
me that something representing freedom and creativity has
a population of people conforming and not accepting
diversity in people. When I got into skating at the age
of twelve it was to be an individual, to be part of
something that had no rules or creative limitations.
Being a big advocate of keeping skateboarding creative I
encouraged him to never stop and to focus on what skating
does for him personally. We should never change ourselves
because someone or a group wants us to conform to their
narrow definition of what cool is. As compassionate human
beings we have a responsibility to accept and understand
our differences. Innovation should be celebrated in any
art form and not discouraged. A bullier or hater doesn't
understand empathy and there's something within
themselves causing them to be insecure and ignorant.
Stand strong and be free to be yourself. It's a big world
out there, so get out there and skate it... not hate it.

Skating StraightI'm not a policeman walking into a classroom
telling kids to just say no. I'm a skateboarder who is
living a dream because I chose to stay clear of drugs and
alcohol. I have no problems preaching this message even
with the backlash it can entail. I've seen people throw
their life away because of substance abuse and it's no
laughing matter. While home from touring a couple years
ago I met up with a skater friend of mine from back in
the day. He wanted to bring along a friend of his they
called "drunk Tim." I thought this should be
interesting. So we picked him up at his ex-girlfriends
run down apartment. He entered the car and completely
reeked of beer. With missing teeth he was showing us
pictures of his son that he lost custody of. I had
figured he was in his mid forties but soon found out we
were the same age. All I could think is that this could
of been me had I chose to turn to drugs and alcohol. We
went to a nearby ramp and skated for a few. He was
falling and stumbling about while people laughed and
cheered him on. I didn't find the humor in what was
taking place. I actually felt sad and unstoked to skate
around him. The overwhelming feeling of keeping on the
right path in life consumed me. Yeah, it might seem funny
when someone is being a clown but it's what's underneath
the surface of the activity that isn't so funny. I've
carried this memory with me in my travels. I've been to
events where I've been offered to do things and have
always stood firm and confident in my beliefs. I get
emails daily from kids asking about getting sponsored.
Companies want someone that will show up on time and that
is reliable. There is a very serious side to this
subject. Getting involved in drugs is a dead end path,
period. When I get down or depressed I jump on my board
and moments later I'm in a different place, a healthy
place. Find your natural highs in life. They're
everywhere.

A Life Cut ShortA few weekends back I attended a skate
memorial for the professional rollerblader James Short.
James life at the age of only 24 was ripped away from him
as a result of being hit by a drunk driver. A woman in
her late forties struck James on his motorcycle and she
survived. She was drunk and had marijuana in her
possession. This hit home because I frequently saw James
in my travels. We always talked skatelife. Him and I have
been to a lot of the same parks. It was our joy for our
sport and the fact that we both skated as a profession
that shared our bond. What made James stand out was his
thirst for the sport and his overwhelmingly positive
attitude. I was a skateboarder and he was a rollerblader
but it never failed, every single time we saw each other
he greeted me with a smile and a hand shake and some good
conversation. Never any attitude or ego. To his fans and
the people who knew him well he has left an impression
about being positive and was a friend to all. You would
see James on the top of a ramp talking with bikers,
bladers, and skateboarders. James life was cut short all
from that woman drinking and driving. Don't drink and
drive, ever.

Submitted
Stories

If you would like
to share your story send to hilarycalisports@yahoo.com All names and locations
are changed to protect your identity.

Julie from Ohio
writes:I have known my 18 year old step son since he
was 4 years old since then I accepted him as my own son.
I have accepted him into my home with open arms. We
became very close and talked about his drug use since he
was 14. I felt he understood my lecture of how much it
hurt his family that he was doing drugs. In February of
2011 he started hanging out with his old friends again.
On Valentines day I went to pick him up at his
Grandmothers only to find him high and back on drugs. His
father and I decided to confront him and he denied it.
After a big blow out fight he decided to move in with his
grandmother. He had got himself a really good job and was
bringing in the cash, life was going good for him and we
thought things were improving.

March 20, 2011 was the worse day of my life. We got the
call that no mother ever wants to receive... my son had
died. He overdosed on drugs with his 19 year old cousin
both found dead in his Grandmothers house. To see them
bring my son out in a body bag, to see his lifeless face
was the worse thing I have ever seen. I will never forget
it. My heart has an emptiness that will never go away.
After burying my 18 year old son and his cousin you can't
help but ask yourself, "Could I have done something
to prevent this?" One has to realize they made their
own choices and I couldn't have stopped this. They will
never know the pain this has caused their families and
friends. He left his 17 year old sister without a big
brother who always watched over and protected her. He
left his little 4 year old brother who looked up to him
as if he was a rock star. All this from simply taking
pills, a senseless death all for reaching a high or buzz.
We have to wake up knowing he is gone forever because of
this. We will never get to talk to him or to to see his
beautiful smile again. He was special and had great
talents that would have taken him far. He had no enemies
and was liked by all. The pain of missing him will never
go away. On Monday June 14th 2011 we finally got the
autopsy report.

DEATH - ACCIDENT - DRUG TOXICITY - REASON OF
DEATH - UNINTENTIONAL INDIGESTION OF TOXIC DOSE OF
PROPOXYPHINE ALONG WITH XANAX.

This report doesn't bring any closure to my heart knowing
it was all accidental. I know he didn't want to die but
that doesn't take the hurt away. This was preventable!
Speaking out and letting people know drugs can kill you
is an important message. We only have one life to live
and by being drug free we can live it to the fullest.Julie Age
35, Ohio
Zach from Detroit Michigan writes:"Back in February of 2009, I thought my
life was going great, I knew my dad drank but he wasn't
out to get wasted every night or anything like that. It
was just something he did at night after work. Well due
to the economy being in really bad shape, he started to
lose business. My dad is a contractor with a store and
does carpentry work and such. Well he started to drink
more and more every night. Well over time this build up
and he was rushed to the hospital and spent 10 days in
there. Since alcohol slows the process of digestion,
everything backed up and the acid in his stomach tried to
digest his pancreas. He almost died. He was in severe
pain for 10 days, many IVs and shots to his stomach. I
was extremely worried about him. I could have lost my
dad. The skin or layer that protects his pancreas was
totally destroyed. Even after he was released from the
hospital he was in much pain for 1-2 months. This was the
most frightening 10 days of my life. During this time my
step mom would come home every night and just get wasted
to try to ease the worry that my dad could die. My little
brother is 11 and he would ask me why his mom had to come
home and drink every night and get drunk. Ill never drink
because of these two reasons. Drinking has destroyed my
step moms life and almost ended my dads. Be smart. Don't
drink."Zach Age
16, Detroit MI
Jennifer from Plano Texas writes:"This is a true story of how drugs and
alcohol wrecked a mans life, and his sons, and then his
wife's as well. Ok, it all started with my then husband
going out on the weekends and returning home with gifts
for me while acting strange. This went on for a few
months and he began drinking quite heavily. Then openly
for the first time he took drugs in front of his four
year old child. I told him to quit or he would lose us.
He changed into a monster with a weird look in his eyes.
He basically gave up living in general. He would attack
my son and I just for the sake of it. He ruined our lives
for four years till one day he got up and left. We
haven't seen him since. We have moved on and made the
most out of the lesson we learned by this man. My son at
age nine told me, "drugs don't work mommy." He
vowed just last month to never touch or go near them.
Truth be known he has grown up so fast and is not my
little boy but now my little man. He is wise at just the
age of 12. All this from seeing his dad make the wrong
choices. And there is no way his father can make things
right because a year ago today that man died from a drug
overdose in his Florida apartment. A waste of a life and
a waste of a father. So in conclusion know your limits
and don't touch drugs all they bring is heart break and
they destroy your life. Don't let your life be a waste.
Thank you."Jennifer
Age 33, Plano TX
Shawn from Cincinnati Ohio writes:"For starters I am Shawn, I am 20 years
old and i currently reside in Cincinnati. I figure I will
give you my life story. I have been through a great deal
of things in my life. It all started when I was about 15
years old. I have never been influenced by peer pressure,
I always have made decisions on my own with what I wanted
to do in my life. Most of them have turned out being the
wrong choices and it has stuck me in a rut. Around
age 15 I was drinking heavily everyday, i mean I would
wake up out of bed before going to school and the first
thoughts were, "How was I going to get messed up
today?" It all started out as fun with friends and
us all having a good time. Coming from such a small town
we all had the same mind state. We didn't have anything
else to do but drink, smoke, and skate. Well around age
16 is when I had my first real run in with the police. I
was driving and was pulled over, they brought the K-9
unit in and I was charged with possession of drugs. I
received probation and the terms and conditions of my
probation was that I have no contact with drugs or
alcohol. Well that only lasted about less than a week. At
age 17 is when I thought I was at rock bottom. I was sent
away to rehab after being locked away in a detention
center for 3 months. I went to rehab which was only
supposed to be a 4 month program well I was there for
just a little over 10 months. In rehab I finally opened
my eyes and realized what I was doing with my life and
how bad I was just throwing it all away. When I came out
I felt like a changed person. I went back to public
school and went on to graduate high school. After turning
18 that's when things went really downhill. I have had
about 7 more run ins with the police from the age 18
until now and I am only 20 years old. Most of my charges
are drinking related. I have had about 4-5 underage
drinking charges and 1 DUI . Honestly I shouldn't be here
right now I have had near fatal run ins with some of the
drugs that I have done. I have came very close to
overdosing a few times, and I am not proud about any of
this. I have hurt loved ones and I have lost things that
I love in my life due to my drinking. My life is going
good now and I've learned a lot from my bad choices. I'm
not a angel by any means but I have toned it down a lot.
If you're reading this and you don't know me then take my
advice and put yourself in my shoes. Take a minute to
think before you actually carry out what you're going to
do because it may just be one of those nights, wrong
place wrong time and you could either get locked up or
even worse yet die. But thank you for reading this and
for Doug Brown I congratulate him on what he's trying to
do. It is definitely a movement and I hope people take
awareness to this and actually take it to heart what
people have to say, thank you, Shawn."Shawn Age
20, Cincinnati OH
Rob from Baltimore Maryland writes:"I was very shy socially, and drinking would
ease that. I was hooked from the get go. I made a lot of
new friends. I drank and drove many of times. Nothing bad
ever happened. It seems like it always catches up to you
though. I am now 26 years old, luckily. I have been
arrested twice for DWI. I went through 26 weeks of
alcohol classes. Finally my probation was over, and I
felt free again. Of course, I learned nothing. I went to
a bar with a friend. Had a million beers. Didn't think
twice about getting in his car to go home. Later that
morning, I woke up with a broken femur, a broken eye
socket. I had no feeling in the left side of my face.
Later I learned that the feeling would not come back. The
dashboard had gone right through my leg, pinning me until
the paramedics arrived. I also woke up to find that 12
feet of rope had been placed in my nose, because my sinus
cavity was crushed. My jaw was also sutured
shut.Basically, I was drinking one moment and the next I
was laying in bed not being able to see, not able to
breath. My mouth was shut, and my sinus cavity was broken
so was breathing out of one nostril. Couldnt move
because I had a major break in my leg. How one moment can
change your life is amazing. This was two years ago.
Im still going to physical therapy. Oh how I wish I
could take that day back. Oh, all my drinking buddies?
Theyre all gone now. I was the one at the parties
trying to get everyone drunk. Thank God I never hurt any
one else. Well, physically anyway. Mentally I have done
my damage. Lucky to be here."Rob Age
26, Baltimore, MD