No Excuses Novemberhttps://noexno.org
What can you do in a month without excuses?Tue, 12 Dec 2017 16:57:29 +0000enhourly1http://wordpress.com/https://s2.wp.com/i/buttonw-com.pngNo Excuses Novemberhttps://noexno.org
How Improv Taught Me to Chill Out About Failurehttps://noexno.org/2016/11/30/how-improv-taught-me-to-chill-out-about-failure/
https://noexno.org/2016/11/30/how-improv-taught-me-to-chill-out-about-failure/#respondWed, 30 Nov 2016 17:06:51 +0000http://noexcusesnovemberblog.wordpress.com/?p=390Continue reading How Improv Taught Me to Chill Out About Failure]]>When I started an improv class 2 years ago, I was terrified. It wasn’t my first foray with improvisational comedy, either. In college, I auditioned for my university’s improv team and didn’t make the cut… all three times I auditioned.

I’ve always loved improv, but every time I tried to perform it myself, I failed miserably.

So, when my friend Jake told me that I should sign up for Improv 101 at the Sacramento Comedy Spot because it would make me a better writer, I got physically nauseous.

For me, improv meant failure, and I’d gotten really good at avoiding any activity that could lead to it.

**Flashback to when I was on the high school volleyball team and my frosh coach told me she wish she’d made cuts to the team so she could cut me from it. Yeah, I avoided sports after that.**

For some reason, though, I decided to follow my fear and signed up for the improv class that would change my life.

That’s hyperbolic, but I really think improv changed my life. Sure, it gave me a creative outlet and cool new friends, but it also taught me to chill out about failure.

As a beginner improviser, I’ve failed a lot. Maybe you’ve seen it! It’s not fun, but it’s changed the way I think about failure.

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” – Winston Churchill

Once you’ve failed a million times, one more failure doesn’t seem so bad and you learn to follow the fear.

Maybe at this point in your NoExNo journey, you feel like you have failed. So what? As Nerd King Chris Hardwick said, “No human ever became more interesting by not failing.”

The only failure you can commit during NoExNo is failing to learn from your mistakes.

How can you adjust your goal to be successful? If you didn’t meet your goal this time, what can you change about your habits to succeed next time?

Although my NoExNo goal is writing-related every year, my day job is very different from the written word. I actually work as an art nude model. This means that I pose for sculptures, paintings, and photographs for everything from gallery exhibits to coffee table books. I’ve even posed for a life-sized bronze fountain, as well as underwater.

There are a few things that I’ve learned from making a living naked that seem to apply to just about everything else I want to accomplish. I’m hoping they’ll help me get through my NoExNo writing goal this year as well.

“Fun is doing difficult things well.”

This is probably one of my favorite quotes of all time. It’s from a local artist and teacher whose classes I pose for. She says it every time someone is struggling with a drawing and wants to quit. Fun is doing difficult things well, she’ll say, and art is hard. But it’s worth it.

I feel like it’s the same thing with NoExNo: just like making art, setting and following through on a goal is hard. But it’s also fun.

Just show up.

Like making art, modeling is hard (and fun). Although it may sound glamorous to lounge around naked all day, it actually takes a lot of skill and a pretty high pain tolerance. When I’m posing for a painting or sculpture, I have to stay in the same pose for up to three hours at a time. When I’m posing for photographers on location, I’m often scratched and bruised from climbing rocks and trees. And it’s always cold: I’ve had hypothermia twice from modeling outdoors in the winter.

But do you know where most new models fail? It’s not posing for long periods of time, or even withstanding the elements. It’s just showing up.

After having worked with several new models, I’ve noticed that more of them flake on their first gig than actually pose. I can understand why; modeling can be intimidating. I had terrible stage fright the first time I stepped onto a modeling stand in front of twenty artists and took off my robe. But the experience was absolutely worth it. I would have never known how much I enjoyed modeling, despite the pain and hard work, if I had never shown up and tried it.

Goals are the same way. I’ve never failed a goal because I wasn’t skilled enough or tough enough. I fail because I don’t show up and try to do it. If you show up for your goal, you’re going to be ahead of the pack.

No apologies.

I love my job. But let’s admit it: it’s a little weird. People look at me strangely when they ask what I do for a living. Some of them are even offended by my art.

I used to apologize to these people, but I quickly noticed that if I apologized to someone who was upset by my art, they would take it as an admission of guilt. It was only further proof to them that what I was doing was wrong.

I eventually learned that some people would love my art, while others would be scandalized by it. And no matter what I said on the subject, I wouldn’t change their minds on whether it was right or wrong. So instead, I learned to not apologize, and to love my work for all its weird, cool glory.

In the same way, don’t apologize for your dreams and goals—not even to yourself. Some people are going to understand what you want to accomplish, but not all of them. And that’s okay; you don’t have to justify yourself. Just get out there, show up, and have some fun!

Missy Sparks is a 20-something, living the green life in the city of trees. Professionally, Ms. Sparks is a [proud] water policy geek. Leisurely, she enjoys creative DIY projects for her house or her blog, The Avian Angle. And personally, Missy enjoys spending quality time with her pug pup, Jake, and her dashingly tall partner, Will. You can find Missy out and about running half marathons, wine tasting or sipping bourbon, and volunteering in her community with the Active 20-30 Club of Greater Sacramento.

]]>https://noexno.org/2015/11/28/8-things-to-motivate-you-this-noexno-and-beyond-missy-sparks/feed/0allisonbakerfreshair.jpggoogle-calendar_logogiphy (2).gifgiphy.giftodolistgiphy (1).gifIMG_4765Inanimate Objects that Have Made Fewer Excuses than Me [Alison Kranz]https://noexno.org/2015/11/09/inanimate-objects-that-have-made-fewer-excuses-than-me-alison-kranz/
https://noexno.org/2015/11/09/inanimate-objects-that-have-made-fewer-excuses-than-me-alison-kranz/#respondMon, 09 Nov 2015 16:41:51 +0000http://noexcusesnovemberblog.wordpress.com/?p=423Continue reading Inanimate Objects that Have Made Fewer Excuses than Me [Alison Kranz]]]>Last year I concluded my list of zero fucks-ness with the quip “no one’s stopping you but you.” While this is true, it can be difficult to attain.

So, for some inspiration, I’ve gathered a collection of inanimate objects that have defied stereotypes and false boundaries to go on and accomplish something no one expected they could.

This mailbox learned how to dance.

This fire hydrant grew a beard.

This fence post sharpened itself into a pencil.

This lake grew a spine.

This hose bloomed into a bouquet of flowers.

This tree turned itself upside down.

If they can do it, so can you. Here’s to a productive and successful NoExNo!

If you’re reading this now, you know that social media is a huge part of the NoExNo community. The whole reason No Excuses November even exists is because of a single Facebook post.

To honor social media’s initial role in spreading the word about NoExNo, here are some ways to maximize NoExNo with social media:

Use the No Excuses November hashtag

When you share your goal setbacks and successes on social media, make sure to use the hashtag #noexno16 so fellow participants can cheer you on and track your progress.

If you’ve participated in NoExNo before, you know the best part is getting to see what fellow NoExNos are up to.

Whether Twitter, Instagram, or Facebook is the social media platform you prefer, you can utilize the NoExNo hashtag to let your friends know what you’re setting out to accomplish in November.

Participate in the Facebook group

It was actually a fluke that we started the No Excuses November Facebook group, but it quickly became the best way for NoExNos to connect with each other. The Facebook group is the place NoExNo participants can post their progress, cry about setbacks, and brag about successes. Every year, the Facebook group takes on a different role and I can’t wait to see how you guys cheer each other on in 2016!

Change your Facebook cover photo

Speaking of Facebook, another cool way to show your commitment to your goal this month is to rep No Excuses November on your social profile.

This is just an example (from last year), but it wasn’t especially hard to make:

I used Canva to make this cover photo using a free high-quality image from Pexels. You can use any photo you want (maybe your own!) and edit the design with tons of free options. For someone who isn’t especially design savvy, I found this pretty easy to use.

Share your goal with the world

I know, I know. Sharing your goals publicly can be scary. But you know what? When you share your goals with your friends, there’s a certain amount of social accountability and support that comes with it.*

If you declare on Facebook that you’re taking a Krav Maga class as your No Excuses November goal, your friends will be excited to cheer you on in your new endeavor.

The flipside is that they’ll also know if you never follow up with or complete your goal.

The threat of social embarrassment is a powerful thing, you guys. You’re more likely to follow through with your goal when you share it with other people.

After all, isn’t that why you signed up for No Excuses November?

*There’s nothing wrong with choosing to keep your goals private. I’m only recommending it because it’s really helpful for me to share my goals because it motivates me to stay on track.

Here we are, another November. I’ve been both looking forward to NoExNo, and dreading it, for over a month. Looking forward to Allison and friends’ colorful emails and Facebook cheerleaders. Not looking forward to choosing a goal.

I’m not sure why I was stressed about it. I picked the same exact goal as I have the last three years – to become more confident at speaking Spanish (generic and un-measurable).

My ultimate goal is to have a conversation in Spanish with my husband’s grandparents over the holidays (more specific). My plan of attack is to practice Spanish with my husband 1 hour a day (realistic and measurable).

I did pretty well at following my practice schedule the last three years – practicing at least 4 days a week! I definitely see improvement after just 1 week. I am way better now than I was right out of school and after 5 years of Spanish classes. However, confidence and experience is something I still lack.

Even after deciding on my same ol’ goal, I feel pretty lame for not picking something new. I think my plan is solid, I’m fairly dedicated, and I always improve. So what’s the dealio-yo with my emo goal depression? I decided that it wasn’t my goal that needed to change, but my attitude.

“Same-o, lame-o,” said Ms. FullofExcuses

I shouldn’t be beating myself up about my goal being lame. You know why? That’s just an excuse! And this is NO Excuses November!

Resolution: My goal is only lame if I don’t do it.

“Is it true, that if you don’t use it, you lose it?” Yes, Little Timmy, yes it is.

“You know I don’t speak Spanish, Baxter!”

Whether ‘practice makes perfect’ or ‘practice makes better’ doesn’t matter – I haven’t done much practicing since last November! My goal is for improvement and confidence, and if I can only manage to commit myself one month out of the year, so be it! It’s one month closer to my goal.

Resolution: Practice is progress.

“Winning!”

Sure, I could pick something else… but I know that this goal is doable. I know that I can accomplish this. I can set myself up for success and be a winner like Beyonce rather than Charlie Sheen.

Resolution: Just because it’s not new, doesn’t mean it’s a bad goal.

New Year, New You, New Reason

Is this goal still relevant? Is it still worthwhile? Yes!

While my goal hasn’t changed, I have. I have a new reason for getting my culata in gear. I’m not just doing this for me or for my husband’s family. (Tick tock! Tick tock!) It’s about that time where we throw caution to the wind and have children, on purpose, despite what everyone says about them. (Rebels!)

Just like every other mom, I want our chiquitos to be the smartest bilingual babies in their class, and I want to know what those pequeños demonios are saying to my in-laws.

Resolution: I have more conviction than last year to keep improving and keep working on my goal.

SO – if you’re like me, don’t let your decision (or indecision) to repeat a goal get you down – it’s just an excuse! It’s only lame if you don’t accomplish it.

Spend some time thinking about why you did it in the first place, and find relevance for your goal now. Recommit yourself to success.

Eily Lopez is a 29-year-old business analyst at a community college in San Diego, CA. She graduated from Cal Poly in 2009 with a degree in Business Administration. Her biggest accomplishments this year include checking ‘Europe trip’ and ‘Avalon Ball’ off her ‘Before Kids Bucket List’. She enjoys binge watching shows on Netflix, listening to audio books and podcasts, making plans to stay in on Friday nights, traveling with her Latin Lover husband, and enjoying San Diego’s local wines and craft beer with friends. She hates paying for parking, reality television, and the misuse of ‘your’. Eily is looking forward to wearing last year’s boots at some point this fall or winter, when the weather finally cools down in San Diego (sometime around January).

]]>https://noexno.org/2015/10/26/wash-rinse-repeat-con-pasion-eily-lopez/feed/3allisonbakerEily Lopez - No Excuses NovemberEily LopezGuest Pep Talk [Valerie Wilson]: NOvemberhttps://noexno.org/2014/11/24/guest-pep-talk-valerie-wilson-november/
https://noexno.org/2014/11/24/guest-pep-talk-valerie-wilson-november/#respondMon, 24 Nov 2014 16:25:57 +0000http://noexcusesnovemberblog.wordpress.com/?p=356Continue reading Guest Pep Talk [Valerie Wilson]: NOvember]]>It started with the chair. Several years ago, when my dad cleared out the house of anything resembling my childhood, he assigned some sort of family significance to this chair, so I took it in out of some weird obligation. This chair sat in the corner of my room for 2 years, collecting dust and odds and ends. Then the leg broke and wood glue couldn’t fix it. The chair couldn’t fulfill its most basic purpose.

During a post-breakup shopping spree, I finally got a window seat for my room, which pushed the chair to the middle.

Maybe I should see if my dad can fix it.
Maybe I should ask my brother if he wants it.
Maybe I could fit it into our cramped living room.

Saying “no” goes against my nature. Perhaps it’s a female thing, not wanting to seem selfish or confrontational. Or a yolo thing, not wanting to miss out on everything while I’m still young. Or a polite-child-of-the-suburbs thing. But whatever it is, it’s obnoxious. Saying “yes” all the time is why I continued to get the grunt work at my previous job. It’s why I get stressed out from an overbooked schedule. And it’s why I put way too much thought into an otherwise generic, decrepit chair.

It was time to give no f***s (à la Alison). Because it’s just a f***ing chair in the middle of my tiny apartment. After a very quick, very amusing trip to Goodwill on my bike, that chair, that guilt, and that weight were gone (well.. at least until I mention it to my dad).

Then NoExNo came around again. Two years ago, I set out to start a new blog – a success in that I started it, but a failure in that I didn’t keep it up. Last year, I resolved to meditate once a day, but try as I might, I couldn’t consistently find time to do that in the morning. 10 minutes of my time each day and I couldn’t do that for myself. This year, I wanted to get to the root cause of the excuses.

I’ve been realizing that every time you add something to your life, something else gets pushed aside – so it was time to see if the opposite was true.

My successes so far this month:

Taking out the chair really opened up my room, resulting in fewer stubbed toes and, randomly, more stretching.

I felt horrible telling a friend who lives close by to wait until my schedule cleared up to hang out, but I ended up enjoying his company more a week later.

I said no to a side project at work that I honestly didn’t have time for and no one questioned it, despite how I figured it would go down (go figure).

Following other NoExNo-ers, I removed Facebook from my phone, so now during lunch breaks, after I check emails and Instagram of course, I have nothing else to do but relax and space out.

I sent this pep talk to Allison before I really felt done. I remember hearing somewhere that perfectionists should aim for 80% perfect, because the rest is a waste of time and energy.

Look at all that room!

And the failures, since I’m, sadly enough, only human:

I should’ve said “no” to a good friend I recently dated, who I’ve hung out with post-breakup more than I ought to. Despite it being his decision due to the circumstances, his feelings are still very ambiguous. He didn’t say f*** yeah last weekend, so I should’ve said a firm f*** no.

A friend asked me to be a reference for a position she applied to. How could you say no? I instinctively said yes, despite not remembering much about the projects we’d done together. I really could do without having to spend time reading through old emails and piecing together old memories in the middle of a big work project. Ugh.

No matter what goal you set this month, think about what in your life isn’t helping you reach it. Anything that doesn’t want you to be your best, healthiest, or happiest is probably not worth it in the end!

________________________________________________
Valerie is a San Francisco cyclist, dancer, climber, nerd, introvert, and stress monkey (yet not a hipster, although I guess hipsters never admit to being hipsters..shoot).

]]>https://noexno.org/2014/11/24/guest-pep-talk-valerie-wilson-november/feed/0allisonbakerLook at all that room!Guest Pep Talk [Martha Caldwell]: Keep Calm and Love YouTubehttps://noexno.org/2014/11/19/guest-pep-talk-martha-caldwell-keep-calm-and-love-youtube/
https://noexno.org/2014/11/19/guest-pep-talk-martha-caldwell-keep-calm-and-love-youtube/#respondWed, 19 Nov 2014 16:30:00 +0000http://noexcusesnovemberblog.wordpress.com/?p=351Continue reading Guest Pep Talk [Martha Caldwell]: Keep Calm and Love YouTube]]>This No Excuses November has been a different sort of experience for me. The last two years I easily picked a goal and knew exactly what I wanted. This year, I feel a bit lost. Maybe it’s because I frantically changed my goal at the last minute. My original plan was to give up YouTube. I should now confess that I have a full blown YouTube addiction. I discovered YouTube in its true “people get paid to create ‘content’ on a regular basis through channels” form a little over a year ago. (I use the work “content” in quotations because of the extreme variability of the definition of that word.) Since that time, YouTube has become my primary brainless form of entertainment. I watch YouTube more than normal TV programming. I am subscribed to a lot of channels/creators and these 3 to 20 minute videos have brought me endless joy.

However, this happiness brought with it a bit of embarrassment. I am very aware the primary YouTube viewer is a teenage girl. Most of the videos I watch are very dumb and as a result of this addiction, I have almost ceased to read. I used to be a voracious reader and that was no longer the case. I missed books and I didn’t know if I could achieve balance without getting rid of YouTube completely. On top of that, this new form of entertainment had me experiencing a lot of self-imposed anxiety about needing to be productive, well-read and cultured. I am unfortunately the type of person that has a really hard time relaxing. I make lists and set goals and this YouTube thing did not fit into this mold. It felt juvenile. What was I doing wasting all this time?! My Type A self was ashamed. YouTube is silly and it was time for me to grow up I told myself. The original goal was born.

When I started sharing my plan with people, I noticed they were not as jazzed as I was. The most vocal opposition came from my sister. My sister acts as a major sounding board for me and I look to her for validation and also honest, true feedback (even though that never always feels as great as validation). “If these videos make you happy and help you relax, I don’t see what’s wrong with that. You don’t need to be productive all the time.” I heard what she had to say but politely disagreed. Imagine all the time I would have without YouTube! Imagine all the books I would read!

As I progressed closer to the Nov 1st goal, I really got to thinking about what it was I was trying to achieve. If I wanted to read more, why wasn’t THAT my goal? Ultimately, I sent a frantic text to Allison declaring “I just can’t do it!” and changed my goal to reading 3 books during November. This past week, I’ve wondered a lot about whether or not this was the right decision. Was my sister right? Alison’s “Giving Zero Fucks” pep talk helped me solidify my answer. At a time in my life when I am trying to alleviate my anxiety, why did I think it was necessary to eliminate something that helped me do that? Instead, I could add an activity like reading that would help me get there faster. I can find balance with both. I need not be embarrassed of my YouTube addiction. Who CARES if it entertains me? Who am I trying to impress? What I’ve learned the most this NoExNo is to evaluate what I want and why and to make self-care the measurement.

]]>https://noexno.org/2014/11/19/guest-pep-talk-martha-caldwell-keep-calm-and-love-youtube/feed/0allisonbakerkeep-calm-and-love-youtube-6Guest Pep Talk [Allie Seidel]: Why announcing your goal is half the battle.https://noexno.org/2014/11/14/guest-pep-talk-allie-seidel-why-announcing-your-goal-is-half-the-battle/
https://noexno.org/2014/11/14/guest-pep-talk-allie-seidel-why-announcing-your-goal-is-half-the-battle/#respondFri, 14 Nov 2014 16:30:00 +0000http://noexcusesnovemberblog.wordpress.com/?p=344Continue reading Guest Pep Talk [Allie Seidel]: Why announcing your goal is half the battle.]]>Congrats! You’re halfway there! Goal setting is as much a part of my life for me as brushing my teeth or getting dressed in the morning (which, let’s hope, are two things that happen on the daily).

Since August of this year, I’ve chosen a few goals each month and have written about them publicly. (See August, September, October and current November goals here.) I’ve found that simply writing my goals down and making them public gives me an extra push to achieve them. Additionally, I love looking back and seeing something that seemed so far off at the time and realizing that I’ve accomplished it.

So naturally, I love NoExNo and have participated for a few years, some years with success, others not so much. My NoExNo goal this year was an interesting choice. I picked “launch the holiday line in my shop” even though I knew I had this planned for Nov. 3rd. So did this leave the rest of November “goal-less” for me? Hardly. When I chose this goal, I knew that I needed to get the holiday line out earlier than the last day in November, so moving it to a later date wouldn’t help, and I was also aware that I could pick a “smaller” goal that I could technically be working towards every day in November. But, since my biggest goal all month was the launch, the early date didn’t matter to me so much as the concept behind announcing it as my goal.

When I set that goal in October, I had no idea what the extent of my holiday line was going to look like. I had big dreams, but wasn’t sure how to reach them. It unfolded over the course of a few weeks to include stamps, 8×10 art prints, and Christmas cards, most of which were only far-off ideas when I set the launch date. Despite the uncertainties, I knew I needed to announce this goal in order to make it happen. This is why I love NoExNo, because everyone is announcing together, and I know that for me, this tiny steps makes a huge difference in helping to make my seemingly far-off goals a reality.

So, announce I did, on multiple platforms including NoExNo, and I set the date. The weekend before I was frantic, learning skills I didn’t yet have (hello, Photoshop) and spent many late nights and early mornings struggling through it. But, since I knew I had announced it, I pressed on because I had set this as a personal and public expectation. And then, magically it all came together and I launched it. And today, a week in, it’s live and it’s selling.

Sometimes achieving goals doesn’t look like a linear path, but more like a maze: two steps forward and fourteen steps backward, with plenty of road blocks and wrong turns, but the feeling I get when I finally accomplish my goals is the reason why I’ll hopefully continue to be a goal-setter (and goal-announcer!) for the rest of my life.

So, NoExNos, be encouraged! Know that by simply sharing you goal here, you are on your way to achieving it. Keep going after what you want, and telling people about it. You’ve already won by being courageous enough to announce your goal. Now, get after it!

I have watched enough late night YouTube videos about String Theory to know with virtually no certainty that time is a dimension. Time is also a father. It is somehow associated with sand. It flies, usually in proximity to fun. And, despite the fact that we can for some reason move it forward or backwards (but only by one arbitrary time-unit!), it runs out. Probably more often than we would like.

These days, I feel like I have been channeling the White Rabbit, whose time seems to be perpetually running out. Each morning, as I wake up 15 minutes after I should have already left for work, and then proceed to play catch-up the entire day, usually working through my lunch break in order to make it to an evening art class or rock climbing session that I have added to my schedule to “de-stress my life,” before coming home to cook a 10pm dinner and read That Book for book club before going to bed too late to wake up for the alarms I have set for 6:00, 6:10, 6:20, 6:30 and (sigh) 7:30 (sorry, bedfellow Evan), I wonder why I keep falling down my own rabbit hole of being behindedness.

Whenever I remark to my dear friend Lisa about the difficulties of managing time in adulthood, she crunches up her hands into fists and tosses her head back to declare, “Sarah! It’s the struggle!” It always makes me feel better to know that it has such a noble name. The. Struggle.

But what is behind all this madness?

I have no idea. But I do have two guesses.

That Little Voice

In researching this PepTalk, which I would like to downgrade to simply a “talk” (lowercase T; no promise of pep) to lower your expectations, I found an infuriating quote, which I wanted to share:

BLEH. I mean seriously. The quotes around busy? VOM. What kind of guilt-inducing madness is this!?

If you REALLY cared, you would find the time.

The subtext?

The way you are doing things isn’t good enough. YOU aren’t good enough.

Unfortunately, this sentiment doesn’t just come from a sad Internet girl on a bench in the middle of winter with all her feelings tucked away in a single shoulder bag.

It’s everywhere.

It’s uttered by your gym shorts as you come home from a long day of work and need to get dinner started for the kids. It’s whispered by your Netflix queue as you spend a night out with friends, and by your friends when you spend a night in with Netflix. You hear it from your parents who want you to visit more often, and your grandparents who want you to visit more often, and your best friend from college who lives in another state and wants you to visit more often. It comes from your boss at work who needs you to put in those extra hours, and your DIY project that you hope to craft into your side business and your Blue Apron box sitting un-opened in the fridge because you have declared that you will Cook With Seasonal Ingredients Three Times A Week, by golly!

And it comes from within.

Which brings us to:

Expectations

[Presented with an eye-roll]

Sometimes, it seems like the solution to everything we are doing wrong is *just* to do it better.

In fact, if you listen closely to That Little Voice (whether it is coming from your mom, your boss or yourself), it seems to also offer a solution for how you can *just* do it better — an expectation for action.

Not seeing enough progress at the gym? If you really cared you would *Just* workout more frequently/longer/harder. If that means you have to cut time from other things, so be it. Aren’t you dedicated? Don’t you want it? Or do you not want it enough?

If you perk your ears up, you can probably hear a storm of voices telling you how you can be better – a better friend, a better colleague, a better constituent. And you can probably hear a flurry of expectations within yourself for how you can be the person you want to be – Eat better! Exercise more! Call your family more often! Write more! Watch less TV!

And if we would, we could.

But there are only 24 arbitrary time units in a day, and we just can’t do it all.

Sometimes, we have to learn when to say ‘Uncle.’ We have to figure out how to allocate our time in ways that perpetuate our growth and nourish us, but we also have to learn how to build in time to rest, rejuvenate, and replenish.

And this, I think, is The Struggle. Knowing when to say yes, and when to say no. When to step forward and when to take a back seat. When to stop and when to go.

These days, I am starting to suspect that there is no magical moment at the end of a task when everything falls into place and we can breathe a sigh of true relief. There is always something else beckoning to us; something new needing our attention.

So I am trying to learn to put on the brakes, even when it feels like the job isn’t yet done. Or maybe, especially when it feels that way. This is why, for the month of November, my goal is to take my lunch break every day.

Because the work will still be there when we get back. But another thing about time? It slips away. And it will continue to do so unless we grab it at those inopportune times, like now.

Maybe it’s not such a bad idea to channel that White Rabbit after all.

White Rabbit: Don’t just do something, stand there…

____________________________________________________________

Sarah lives in Los Angeles. She enjoys audio books, art class (” ‘Cause adult education’s a wonderful thing”), rock climbing, and listening to Maria Bamford on repeat. She is doing the best that she can.