Be the Leader in Your Own Life

Bad things happen to good people. That’s just a harsh reality of life. That’s the bad news. The good news is that your success in life has surprisingly little to do with the things that happen to you; and has everything to do with how you respond to what happens to you.

Everyone faces difficulties and challenges in life. What separates the winners from the losers is how we choose to deal with the challenges, especially as speakers or trainers. Oftentimes, we become an easy target of skepticism because we are bold enough to share our stories with others.

My story is especially controversial as I recall back when I was living a life of desperation and poverty. I used to think that successful people just had “good luck.” I remember seeing happy people and thinking to myself, “If that jerk had to walk a mile in my shoes, he wouldn’t be so darn happy!”

What I learned on my road to wealth and happiness is that everyone has a little bad luck; it’s just that some people do a better job than others dealing with it. The people that I used to resent for being happy, had the same money, health and relationship problems I did. They just had better responses to those problems and their healthier responses resulted in healthier outcomes in life.

It ‘aint rocket science.

Here’s an example of what I’m talking about. Take two men who have financial struggles. One man cuts back on his spending and works a few hours overtime. The other man starts drinking and feeling sorry for himself and eventually falls into shady dealings to make ends meet. The first man ends up getting back on his feet, and the second man ends up in jail.

Same problem. Different responses. Different outcomes.

Life is all about what you make of it and your response to different stimuli.

I recall a time when I was speaking to a group of business owners and entrepreneurs in Dallas. I had lunch with a really nice guy who had just read my book, The Upside of Fear. As we shared lunch and a nice conversation, he told me that he had recently backed out of a shady business deal after he read my book on a plane. He told me that he saw himself within the pages of the book if he went through with the deal. But, he didn’t go through with it. He changed his mind. He changed his response to his financial pressures, and you can bet your bottom dollar his outcome was better! There are many who might have gone through with the shady deal and then when consequences came home to roost, they would have blamed the initial financial pressure. They might never admit that it was a poor response to the financial pressure that led to the troubles.

Bottom line is simple: Bad things happen to good people. Fortunately, your life is a reflection of how you choose to respond to whatever comes your way, whether it’s your speaking business, a personal relationship, or a financial problem, you control your own reaction and response.