Thursday, July 26, 2012

Liquid Diet: Day Four(ty thousand and twenty-sixteen)

Today's Weight: I don't know!! I refused to step on G's scale, not knowing it's trustworthiness or believability. I'm a loyal girl, I don't fool around on my scale.

Freakout factor: Mildly freaked, a little desperate to know if maybe I dropped to goal?

Oh, I'm actually doing fine. Day Three, as I remembered correctly, was the day that your stomach surrenders. "No food? Whatevs. Starve me, see if I care."

Well, that's not exactly true, because when G made chicken nachos with cubed avocado last night, I went into full inhale mode! Yum. No sour cream, and fortunately there were three of us eating the one plate (it was an appetizer for G and M - G's daughter - who went on to have burgers after the nachos. I abstained.). I was pleased with my reasonable dinner after a hard day of sticking to the protein shakes (two, yesterday). Later, I snuck a handful of oyster crackers, but SERIOUSLY, how bad are oyster crackers?

(Sidebar: Okay, seriously, oyster crackers are like seriously bad for me. Crunchy, crispy light goodness? Oh hells yeah, I could eat a bag of them. Croutons, oyster crackers, grissini breadsticks, there's a wealth of mildly flavored crunchy carbs out there that I would do best to avoid the whole entire rest of my life.)

('Nother sidebar: When Jen and I went to the expo for the See Jane Run half marathon, afterward, I talked her into going to my favorite free grissini breadstick place in the world. And did I eat grissini? Heck, yeah! Did I eat too many? Heck, no! I was very impressed with my self-restraint. There is a first for everything, hahaha.)

Grissini. Food of the gods.

Tonight will require some self-management skills. Self-control. Grown-up behavior. I am not entirely sure I'm up for it. :) After work, I have a massage appointment for my wounded shoulder. Trouble is, I don't have access to my car, which waits patiently for me in my garage at home. I forgot to plan for it when G took me to his place on the motorcycle last night. So now, getting to that appointment (and home) will require a bit of perseverance on my part. Transferring buses, long walks, etc. I will be hungry when I get home, and probably feeling sorry for myself based on my long commute.

Confession: Last night, when I told G I couldn't come back to his house tonight - my food-addict secret self chimed in to my subconscious thoughts. "No boyfriend, no kids? Home alone? TV and FOOD!!!!"

Uhh, you see I am a real problem child. So. Strategy. I think I only have one, maybe two protein shakes left in the fridge here at work. I will walk down and buy a couple more at lunch. I will drink one before I begin my long commute. I will remind myself that it is a beautiful sunny day and I am lucky to be out taking a long stroll. By the time I make it home, it will probably be too late for me to go to the Y. If I am not weary and whiny, I will get off my bus at the bottom of my hill, which is 1.2 miles from my home. I will have walked probably a mile+ from the first bus to my massage appointment, then back that same distance to the return bus home. Then a mile uphill to my home. I will call this a *very good work out day* and I will allow myself to be pleased. I will not feel badly for not going to the Y.

When I get home, I will have strategized a reasonable dinner. I will go to the grocery store. I will buy a box of sugar free popsicles, and I will allow myself two, maybe three over the course of the evening. They're like, what, fifteen calories? When I go to the grocery store, I will not buy crunchy-crispy-anything!! No breadsticks, crackers, cereal. Nothing. If it's not in the house, I can't eat it.

Hey - even though I'm slowly starving to death (KIDDING!) this week, I have keen observations to make about how much my body likes feeling a little hungry and not having a stomachache from eating too much or eating the wrong foods. It's really quite remarkable. More later.

I took this self-portrait while riding home on the back of G's bike last night. Cool, huh?

My Story

I have found a new passion for cycling and running! I’m just getting started: this blog chronicles my new experiences with fitness, along with my weight loss and other related changes. Sometimes it’s just me blathering on about life, love, kids or whatever’s on my mind. I had vertical sleeve gastrectomy (VSG) weight loss surgery on 1/11/11, the day after my 41st birthday. My starting BMI was 46.6, or 263 pounds. I met my first goal of 140 pounds, or a “normal BMI” of 24.9 (or less) and now I'm working on maintenance.