i am seeking, i am striving, i am in it with all my heart. -vincent van gogh

Pieces of My Life

“I found that if you have a goal, that you might not reach it. But if you don’t have one, then you are never disappointed. And I gotta tell ya… it feels phenomenal.”

-Peter LeFleur, Dodgeball

Last night I was bored and being the narcissist that I am, decided to read through some of the posts here on Becoming Brittany. Last March I wrote a little somethin’ somethin’ called “Follow That Dream”, which was basically a confession of what I want my life to look like by the time it’s over.

I guess that’s referred to as a “bucket list”, but I like to refer to it as my “future memories”. Anyway, upon reviewing that list last night, I had the giddy little thrill of realizing that in the last ten months, I had accomplished some of those very deeds. I know what you’re thinking… “Oh! Isn’t it marvelous?!” And that is exactly what I thought too. So in honor of making a small but note-worthy dent in my Future Memories List, I decided I’d catalogue my experience with those once-hoped-for-and-now-just a lovely memory to relish- experiences.

{Get a gym membership} – Sure enough, hell froze over and Yours Truly decided to enlist in that quest so many of us have found ourselves in. I am now a bonafide member of one Gold’s Gym. I never thought I’d say this, but exercising is not my least favorite thing. I’ve come to appreciate the sense of accomplishment one feels after running or throwin’ them weights around. I’ve already accepted the fact that I’ll never achieve an Audrey-esque waistline (no thanks to my adoration for confectionary thrills), but recently I’ve noticed that I’m far less grotesqued by my derrierre than I was a year ago… THAT in and of itself is quite inspiring, don’t you think?

{Not need my inhaler} – Though this one cannot be completely hacked off the list of things hoped-for, I am halfway there. I can now run for an hour without taking one hit… Howev, laughing hysterically still presents a problem. It’s safe to say though that eradicating hysterical laughter out of my life would be far worse than any old asthma attack.

{See an opera– any opera (which will most likely spoil everyday life for me forever-after)} Oh Delilah. There are just no words for this one. La Boheme. (Insert slow, enraptured sigh HERE.) It was like… a dream. That’s the only way I can think of to describe it. Between the rich poetry, the mellifluous music, the tragical amore… I was completely and utterly intoxicated. Oh, and yes, every day life was spoiled for about a week or so. Then I somehow managed to remember that with all the living I have to do, I shouldn’t write Life off just yet. And I simply cannot discuss this experience without expressing my deeply heartfelt gratitude to him who afforded me this rapturous experience: If you’re reading this C- Thank you, thank you, thank you…

So I know this list seems inconsequential since there are a whopping three accomplishments, but a goal is a goal, right? I believe I’ve noted before my affinity for list making and the thrill I get from crossing things off of them. I can’t be altogether sure, but I would compare the sensation I achieve might be similar to one a serial killer feels after yet another victim… What? So even though it’s quite a small little dent in that list of mine, it’s a dent nonetheless and crossing off those three accomplishments was sheer exhilaration.

Now, here are the ones I plan to knock out this year, or at least get started on ’em: