practice random axe of kindness.i like ramdomosity and fictional violence and that's what i look for in writing. i have a problem with self-loathing and i will tear you a new one (in review form).please send me enraged emails (i love them!) and tell me i'm an insensitive bastard. i'm a college freshman, graveyard frequenter, and a recovering hotpants addict.

"Hey! I know where we are! We're at that place where I didn't know where we were before!" --Beast Boy

"I will not be stupid. I will not be annoying. I will not be twelve... The fingernail did an anti-stupid dance for good measure." --Juni

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." --Fred and George Weasley

"There was an art to flying, no, more like a knack. The trick was to aim for the ground and miss." --Life, the Universe, and Everything

"A refrigerator may hold a basket of strawberries, which would be important if a maniac said to you, 'If you don't give me a basket of strawberries right now, I'm going to poke you with this large stick.'" --Lemony Snicket

“You might think that climbing a mountain is half the battle, only to find out that the mountain goats who live at the top are vicious, and heavily armed.” --Lemony Snicket

“I’m tickled pinker than a sunburned Caucasian! I’m in higher spirits than a brand-new graveyard! I’m so happy-go-lucky that lucky and happy people are going to beat me with sticks out of pure, unbridled jealousy!” --Count Olaf

"For every sprinkle I find...I will kill you." --Stewie

“Well, I can’t eat muffins in an agitated manner. The butter would probably get on my cuffs. One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them.” --The Importance of Being Earnest

“I’m not dancing alone; I am dancing with the forest.” --“The Presentation of Self”

“Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up. It knows it must run faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed. Every morning a lion wakes up. It knows it must outrun the slowest gazelle or it will starve to death. It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or a gazelle. When the sun comes up, you better start running.” --African proverb

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.-- Albert Einstein

p.s.: huggles for my home skillets and random reviewees. except you. i don't like you.