Who knew that Cory Schneider’s coming out party as The Annointed One would turn into The Disjointed One?

Did anybody see this coming?

Twenty-six minutes into his first game as the Vancouver Canucks’ starter Saturday, Schneider shockingly was trooping to the bench and tugging on a reliever’s ball-cap, and the guy much of the fan-base wants to divorce, Roberto Luongo, was taking the net to what seemed like a chorus of “Loo” with some “Boo” from the seats.

Earlier in the week, the NHL, with the games coming back, tweeted “Canucks’ fans are you ready to see Cory Schneider as No. 1 net” to which Luongo’s supposed alter-ego @strombone1 playfully tweeted “can’t wait!!!” So what do we get Saturday night? The absolute worst-case scenario for Schneider, who suffered a major-case of stage-fright, giving five goal, withs on 14 shots, delivered his way by the Anaheim Ducks.

None of those five on him by the ageless Teemu Selanne, who did, however, have two assists on the night and also beat Luongo twice–one of those coming on a powerplay redirect which tied the NHL’s oldest player with Phil Esposito for third all-time with 249. Selanne (42 years, 200 days) became the oldest player since Gordie Howe (42 years, 326 days vs Buffalo, 1971–courtesy @theicemencometh) to get four points in a game. The guy’s a freak of nature, what can I say.

But enough of Selanne. What do we have, Goalie Controversy Part 11 in Vancouver? No, I don’t think so. It is one game out of 48 and Jonathan Quick, the best player in the playoffs last spring for the LA Kings on their Stanley Cup run, also gave up five in his first game earlier Saturday as they raised the banner at the Staples Centre. It was a funny opening night around the league. Jaromir Jagr at 40 scored twoand had two helpers for Dallas; Selanne had his four points in Vancouver, fellow oldster Alex Kovalev had three points for Florida and the Blues, with terrific rookie Vladimir Tarasenko, drilled the Red Wings, who may finally be seeing how the other half lives.

Schneider left the game with his face matching his hair-colour (red), but frankly, his teammates ran around so much in their end of the ice it looked like “a fire-place” out there, to borrow one of Esa Tikkanen’s funny malaprops. They didn’t do either goalie any favours. They couldn’t kill a powerplay, either, as the Ducks went 3-for-3.

At game’s end, the Canucks hung around the ice for a Shirts Off Our Back salute to their fans, before coach Alain Vigneault trooped into the interview room and refused to say if he’d call Schneider’s number against the Oilers Sunday night in Ralph Krueger’s first official game as NHL head coach.

Bet on it. Vigneault isn’t going to let this fester.

Maybe if Luongo had slammed the door in his 34 minutes we wouldn’t be saying that. But Vaigneault, who waited as long as he could before hooking Schneider so as not to embarrass him, has to show faith in Schneider.

To make matters even worse, the two guys most mentioned coming to Vancouver if traded to Toronto–Tyler Bozak and Nazem Kadri–scored in the Leafs 2-1 win earlier Saturday. Hey, if it’s going to be a bad night make it a REALLY BAD night, eh? To his credit, the butterfly goalie was a stand-up guy after the game, taking on every question.

“You know how this market works and the goalie situation…what do you think of that?” he was asked.

“Doesn’t matter what market I was in. If I play this way, it would be unacceptable anywhere in the world,” said Schneider. “I’m not concerned where I am. I’ve learned in a market like this, you have to accountable and responsible, and you have to perform and produce and tonight I didn’t do that.”

“You live and you learn…I’m not thinking too long about this one,” said Schneider, who had a .937 percentage last season and it was .643 Saturday.

“You don’t expect it’s going to go this way. I felt a half-second off and at this level that’s all it takes. I’ll just put my head down and work my butt off,” said Schneider, who stopped 32 shots in 40 minutes going against the Sedins in a scrimmage a few days ago, looking lights-out. On Saturday, all the goalie saw was red lights.

“All hockey players need a short-term memory,” said Vigneault.

Coaches too.

Hindsight being 20-20, Schneider was either going to stone the Ducks and make everybody look good, or he was going to have a clunker. Nothing in between.

“How did it look?” Vigneault was asked.

He shrugged his shoulders. What was he going to do, throw Schneider under the bus?

“He tried hard but you get nights like this. It’s the first game of the year. Next time I play him I’ll sure he’ll be fine,” Vigneault said, who didn’t want to have to yank Schneider before a full-house and a HNIC audience.

“The game is about performance. When I pulled Schneids, I thought it was best for the team,” said Vigneault.

Luongo, who felt he should have had both Selanne goals (maybe the first that snuck in, but the second looked like a scorer’s snipe), empathized with Schneider. This isn’t an adverserial goaltending situation. We’re not talking Eddie Belfour and anybody who wanted his job over his Hall of Fame career. Luongo likes Schneider, a lot.

What does Luongo say to Schneider? Not much. No pat on the back, no kick in the butt.

“The kid has a tremendous amount of talent and I’m not worried about him,” he said.

What did Luongo think of the fan reaction when he went in? It was tough to tell the Loo from the Boo.

“I don’t even know how to describe it,” chuckled Luongo. “It’s part of the game, a fun moment.”

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