Struggling With Overeating

Mastery over food is a key to self-esteem and true spiritual fulfillment.

I am 37 years old and have battled a weight problem since I was a teenager. I have received all kinds of assistance and nothing works. I feel I am at a dead end with my relationship to food. I have prayed to God to help me with this "evil inclination." I would appreciate any guidance.

Dear Reader,

An ancient Jewish aphorism asserts that knowing that one's own affliction is also suffered by many others is in and of itself a measure of comfort. That being the case, struggling with obesity in our times is in the company of the many and thus partially comforting.

Obesity is one of the ubiquitous issues of our time. Being overweight in a society whose motto is "you can never be too thin or too rich" can be a heart-wrenching experience. There are those who have seriously expressed an "if only" wish that they might have lived in previous eras where “zaftig” and substantial in body configuration was a desirable norm. They point to the paintings of the masters of that day (e.g. Rembrandt) whose female figures were certainly not of the emaciated variety that are considered attractive in our current milieu. The fuller figures of yesteryear represented a status of plenty, whereas today's idealized specimen would have raised concerns of scarcity, or worse yet, of illness.

Being overweight in our society can be a heart-wrenching experience.

We live in a time, as reflected in the voice of the reader, where the problem of being overweight is of paramount concern and has been labeled a “deadly epidemic,” “plague,” or at the very least a “crisis.” Health issues such as high blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, and heart disease, etc. all seem to be exacerbated by, if not caused by, obesity.

The psychological fallout is equally devastating. Obesity in a culture that worships “thin” must perforce lead to painful issues of low self-esteem.

In addition, it often gives rise to depression which psychologists define as anger turned inward. The obese person often finds him/herself isolated, either because of his perception of what others think of him, or self-imposed by lethargy, despair, etc. This in turn leads to more overeating and invokes a vicious cycle.

Kate is a person of keen mind and great accomplishments. She is a wife and mother and has degrees in law, architecture, masonry, business and a myriad of other talents. Her husband used to jokingly comment that he could never predict what hat she would be wearing when he came home from work.

Despite all her achievements, Kate found no peace or pleasure in life, because she could not master what, in her mind, was her greatest challenge -- controlling her weight. Ultimately, when health issues arose, both her doctors and her rabbi supported her decision to have gastric bypass surgery. The change was dramatic. It was as though she got a new lease on life. She was no longer driven feverishly to find new horizons to conquer. There was a sense of peace and tranquility that finally permeated her person.

Similarly, Rachel has battled weight all her life. The extent to which she is tormented by it, was revealed in conversation one day, when she shared that her seriously-compromised special needs child did not come close to the agonizing challenge that obesity did.

Sedentary Lifestyle

To treat the syndrome of overeating as the inability to eat in a disciplined fashion is perhaps an oversimplification of what is often a multi-layered and complex issue.

It goes without saying that the first order of treatment for the overweight person is to have a thorough medical evaluation to rule out metabolic issues such as thyroid. Genetics often play a role, but the overwhelming thinking is that one is not hopelessly doomed by genes.

A major contributing factor to this raging problem has been identified as the sedentary lifestyle we lead. An innovative primary school in Chicago introduced the “walking school bus” concept, where children are encouraged to walk the mile or so to school. They begin the day with 60 minutes of yoga or body movements. Their lunch program consists of only healthy choices. This parenthetically, is a public school, not a school for privileged children. Both students and parents are delighted. It has been indisputably demonstrated that children who eat healthy and are active perform better in school and have higher self-esteem.

Another nemesis to healthy eating is the fact that families today are often comprised of two working parents, where “takeout food” is frequently the comfortable choice. Furthermore, hours of TV viewing promotes, among other noxious results, eating with no recourse to burning off calories.

8 Practical Steps

It is imperative to get to the root of the problem and figure out, perhaps with the help of outside intervention, what triggers the overeating response. If seriously addressed, one can begin to recognize patterns that will help discover why or when overeating takes place. There are weight control programs that focus primarily on how and for what purpose one uses food.

Here are eight basic guidelines to prevent overeating, that can be incorporated into one’s daily habits.

1. If you are not really hungry, but just want to “cozy up” with a piece of chocolate cake to assuage a concern or a worry, try seeking comfort elsewhere -- i.e. call a friend, take a walk outside, clean a closet etc, etc.

2. Eat consistently. Don't fall prey to feast or famine by starving yourself all day and then stuffing yourself at dinner. Small meals throughout the day when you are hungry works better. In many societies the main heavy meal is consumed at lunchtime, rather than in the evening, so that one may burn off the calories.

3. Exercise regularly, not only for weight control, but for both physical and mental health, such as mood enhancement, etc. Exercise has also been shown to diminish the craving for sweets and junk food.

Total denial gives food more seductive power. Everything is acceptable within limits.

4. Eat smaller portions -- one cookie instead of a batch. Total denial gives food more seductive power. Everything is acceptable within limits.

5. Keep sweets and other problematic foods out of reach and out of sight. Studies have demonstrated that those who keep candies on their desk or easily accessible, have a five-times greater propensity to eat candy than those who have to get up to get them.

6. Pre-plate your food. Take a designated portion out of the bag, can, pot, or what ever container the food came in -- and put the rest away.

7. Use smaller bowls, plates and spoons, which will also make for eating less.

8. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Unlike calorie-dense foods such as cake, candies and other sweets, fruits and vegetables have a high fiber content which helps keep you feeling full. Some of my friends keep prepared platters with bite-size snacks of fruits and vegetables, so that when they and their children walk into the house famished, they will grab a healthy snack instead of junk food.

Profit vs. Loss

Next, I would like to address how the reader refers to his "relationship with food" as his "evil inclination." I think it is a rather harsh assessment. "Challenge," in my estimation, would be a better term.

Gary has been struggling with a weight problem for years. In past conversations, he attributed his overeating to simply opting for pleasure over pain -- the pain of denying himself and the unwillingness to incur the discomfort of postponing gratification. Lately, he has been looking slim and healthy, and he shared that he’d made a list of gains and losses to consider whether to eat sensibly, or to indulge in excessive eating. He categorized them in the following way:

Gary’s Gains of Sensible Eating:

a. The way I feel about myself -- i.e. improved self-esteem.

b. The willingness to risk, and the resulting empowerment of other areas of life.

c. The sense of pride that others would take in my accomplishment.

d. Success in managing my weight allows me to be a role model and mentor in this and other areas.

Gary’s Losses from Overeating:

a. Settling for a degree of failure, and hence the inability to accomplish other goals.

b. The thought that if prayer had not been successful in this area, it raises questions about other things that he would pray for.

c. How people looked at me, and how opportunities are missed because of my physical appearance.

I asked Gary about the role prayer in achieving his success. He explained that his request of God was very specific. He prayed that God assist him by strengthening and reinforcing his resolve and determination.

Gary spoke of his uphill battle to disabuse himself of his addictive behavior, and to opt for the best and most self-respecting part of himself. He admitted that, consciously or subconsciously, he had been sabotaged by self-defeating behavior, which kept him stuck in mediocrity. His full potential and creativity were constantly being stifled by his posture of least resistance. Now, his new dynamic of self-control with food had empowered him to consider possibilities of growth and achievement in other areas of his life that he had never entertained before.

Transforming the Ordinary

There is a story told of a simple Jew in the time of pogroms in Europe who used to gorge himself obsessively with whatever food came his way. Though reluctant to respond when questioned about his strange behavior, he finally broke his silence, and with tears streaming down his face, spoke of his father, a pious Jew, who because of his slight physical stature was an easy victim for his treacherous attackers. When his father was murdered, he vowed that he would eat and eat so that his huge body could put up greater resistance when the time would come for him to defend his Judaism.

The dedication of this pure, simple soul -- misguided though it might have been -- is touching but far beyond our scope.

What is relevant for us, however, is that every behavior -- no matter how physical its expression -- is an opportunity for a spiritual connection by means of mindfulness and sublimation. Blessings of gratitude and thanksgiving -- recited with intent, before and after ingesting food -- moves us into a Godly realm.

Jacob's ladder had feet firmly planted on the ground, and head reaching the heavens.

Our typical days provides myriad opportunities to make formal or informal appeals to the Master of the Universe -- to help us use the energy derived from the delights of this world, to do His Will and to be better people. This attitude transforms ordinary acts -- eating, sleeping, vacationing, etc. -- into one seamless tapestry of spiritual service. If we would integrate this approach into daily living, slowly but surely we would plug into the paradigm of Jacob's ladder -- with feet firmly planted on the ground, and head reaching the heavens.

Chassidic writings discuss how many of our daily activities are actually tools to access a higher reality. Love of children, spouse, friends and pleasures, can be a medium through which to achieve love of God. Likewise, the experience of fear -- thunder and lightning, dark, safety, etc. -- can be converted it into awe of the Infinite One.

Emptiness Inside

My three-year-old grandson, Yitzel, was having a rough day in the playpen, nudging his mother that he was bored. After rejecting suggestion after suggestion, my daughter, Chadshie, in exasperation, told him to just go out into the backyard and find someone to play with. Two minutes later, he was back, saying to Chadshie, "Mommy, there’s no one out there. No boys, no girls, no one at all. It is just full of empty."

"It is just full of empty" is an apt description what many of us feel at one time or another as we move through life. But there are those whose “feeling empty” is a more constant and desperate existential state. And this may compel one to try to fill that emotional or spiritual void with binging on food, or whatever they think might fill the emptiness inside of them.

The prophet Isaiah states that there will come a time of great hunger and great thirst, "Not a hunger for bread or a thirst for water, but rather to hear the word of God." I have a strong feeling that if we would carefully examine the underpinnings of hunger and thirst gone awry in our day, we will discover that that these sensations are in fact spiritual hunger for the word of God.

It is conceivable that this phenomenon is an expression of "God in search of Man," an invitation from the Master of the Universe to His Table. Food for the soul is the currency. Increasing our commitment to Torah study, prayer-meditation and transcendent acts of kindness would be a meaningful and potent response to the insatiable hunger we feel.

The Torah assures us twice in Deuteronomy: "You will eat and you will be satisfied." The second identical verse appears repetitive but, in fact, comes to tell us that when we are aligned spiritually with the Almighty, blessing will inhere in the morsel of food that we ingest, such that the minimum amount will satisfy us.

Indeed, there is a holistic congruence, a correspondence between the physical and spiritual spheres of existence. When all is well in one realm, it resonates with the other. Like the reader, each one of us has our own battles to fight, struggles to overcome and issues to rectify. Hopefully, our dedicated efforts to do so will hasten the long-awaited redemption when all the pieces will finally fall into place, and mankind will thirst no more.

About the Author

Rebbetzin Feige Twerski of Milwaukee, Wisconsin has devoted her life to Jewish education and Outreach, giving lectures worldwide on a myriad of Judaic subjects. She is a mother of 11 children, and many grandchildren whose number she refuses to divulge. She serves as the Rebbetzin along side her husband, Rabbi Michel Twerski, of Congregation Beth Jehudah of Milwaukee.

The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 22

(22)
Susan Petre,
May 7, 2005 12:00 AM

I too am a member of Overeaters Anonymous

This is for Ana of Hondorous - go to the Overeaters Anonymous website, which is oa.org. There is a meeting in Cortes, Hondurus at San Padro Sula. I too believe that Judaism and OA complement each other in the recovery of addiction, that OA gives us the tools to apply the principles of Judaism to live a spiritual solution to food addiction. There is also an organization called JACS, for Jewish addicts. I knew a woman here in Atlanta OA who is very involved in it.

(21)
Anonymous,
February 20, 2005 12:00 AM

Get the help that's right for YOU

I want to agree with the comment by a dietician below. My husband tried a variety fo different "suggestions" but what he needed to do was see a doctor who specialized in weight loss and could tell him what HE needed to do to actually lose weight. In his case, it included specific medications to change his metabolism, a specific restricted diet and exercise routine. He has lost 100 pounds as a result. For other people, there might be a psychological element that needs to be addressed with a counselor or a group like OA. Other people might even have a medical condition that hasn't been diagnosed yet. So don't just try whatever you hear of, but go to a professional - and, follow through on whatever they tell you to do!

(20)
Anonymous,
February 14, 2005 12:00 AM

Gastric Bypass Surgery

Please be aware that Gastric Bypass Surgery is very risky. My cousin recently died two days after undergoing the operation at a top hospital. She struggled with her weight and the depression that accompanied it and turned to surgery to improve her self-esteem. She is now a stastic in a medical textbook.

(19)
Ken berman,
February 2, 2005 12:00 AM

Obesity

I have a friend that found comfort in a Toronto group called Overeaters Anonymous which is not unlike AA. Also known as OA. He founc comfort in the group and actually formed many lasting relationships as well as loosing his weight. Be Well

Ken

(18)
Anonymous,
January 26, 2005 12:00 AM

Are you a "food-a-holic"? There is an answer for you!

I struggled with diets and losing weight my whole life. I tried every diet that came down the pike. That awful craving for food had me by the throat, until I found Overeaters Anonymous in 1980.I learned that for me food is an addiction, a real and serious addiction...If you've tried everything, and feel desperate, alone, fat, miserable, and all the accompanying manifestations of low self-esteem that being out of control with food bring, please know that you are NOT alone! There is a program that works for anyone with any kind of problem with food (overeating, undereating, bulimia, etc.) Because of this remarkable and free (!) program, I no longer have the compulsion to overeat. I've been thin for over 20 years....

(17)
Sarah Dillard,
January 24, 2005 12:00 AM

Thank you for the help

I too have had a weight problem all my life. I always feel if I could just get thin everything else in my life would be great. Of course this is not true but it sure seems like it. I will try once again with your reccomendations. Thank you very much. Sarah

(16)
Anonymous,
January 20, 2005 12:00 AM

Pray and follow God's laws to a healthy diet

I have lived my life on a strict diet, not for obesity, but for another health concern that has made nutrition and health almost a second career. I often feel out-of-place and have to accept the questions and criticism of not being able to eat what most other people eat.

I have learned several things that will most certainly help you to lose weight.

1. Pray and take part in service. Prayer relieves anxiety and will help you to maintain a good attitude about your diet. The people you meet in service on are more likely to be accepting of you, if they believe what they pray for. But most of all if you obey God's laws you will find he will help you to work at achieving your goal.

2. Adhere to the Jewish dietary laws, based on the Mishnah and Talmudic dietary laws. You will find that the ancient Jewish dietary laws coincide very closely with those of today's best nutritionists. Not just today's kosher laws, but eat as if you were in the time of Moses. Split your food groups properly, never mix improper foods, and study what they ate (within our customs) and you will find that such foods as sugars, refined foods, and improper mixtures of food will disappear from your diet. So will overeating. You will also gain strength to stay on your diet.

3. Love yourself and others. If you are happy with your actions and with yourself it will not matter what others think of you. If you know that what you are doing is good and right, then the others are wrong, and if they verbally tempt or question you will be both polite and not relent because you know that what you are doing is good and is right for your health both physically and spiritually.

4. Stay active and enjoy exercise. You shoudl enjoy your exercise and never overexercise. Be active in your daily living habits.

Most of all remember that by staying on your diet you are doing good, doing good and feeling good about yourself, so you will not be effected by the criticism of others.

(15)
Jennifer,
January 20, 2005 12:00 AM

I have found a solution

I, like many others, have suffered from overeating since I was a little kid. To make a long story short, I began going to Overeaters Anonymous meetings where I learned about the 12 steps - spiritual steps. I then read a book called "Food Addiction The Body Knows" and "From the First Bite" by Kay Sheppard. These books changed my life. It described what I had and always had-Food addiction; a progressive and fatal illness characterized by obsession with food and weight and the utter INABILITY to resist its demands. What a revelation! I am powerless and very happy about it because now I have found a solution. I realized that I was allergic to sugar, flour and wheat - all refined and all quickly absorbed in the bloodstream. Addiction runs in my family and I believe that this is a biogenetic condition which Kay describes in her book. I weigh and measure 3 meals a day and a snack before bed. I attend RFA meetings (Recovery from food addiction) where we all abstain from sugar, flour and wheat and help others to do the same. I practice the 12 steps and try my best to invite G-d into all my affairs. The best part is that I no longer have cravings because my food plan does not include my trigger foods and my protein and complex carbohydrates are balanced (eaten together) which is perfect for my brain & body chemistry. If anyone would like to discuss this matter with me or needs help I would love to be of service. My email address is elllieg@yahoo.com. Thank you Rebbetzin for writing this article - it's a topic that needs to be discussed.

(14)
Anonymous,
January 19, 2005 12:00 AM

You don't have to be obese to overeat!

Overeating can mean just one cookie!
I definitely have a huge problem with overeating especially when I'm tired. I figure that if I keep eating I'll get some sort of energy. Thank G-d you wouldn't necessarily know how much I eat when I shouldn't just by looking at me. Hashem knows that I eat too many cookies and too much chocolate!

(13)
Anonymous,
January 19, 2005 12:00 AM

Thank you so much. What a helpful article.

(12)
Ana,
January 19, 2005 12:00 AM

I have a problem with overeating.

I have had a problem all my life with overeating, when I was little until I became an adolescent, I dieted and my mom helped me to reach an ideal weight, after I married and had my first child I was left with 10 pounds overweight, after my second with 25 and now I'm more than 40 pounds over weight, and I struggle everyday with diets, and the pressure my mother and husband put on me as well as the society sorrounding me. I have tried every diet available in the market, I go down a little, but after a while, when I see myself a little better I go back again, and the rebounce is worse. I don't know what to do anymore, I have surrendered my will to eating specially carbohydrates, the only thing that saves me a little is that I exercise 4 to 5 days a week, and I'm a very active person, but I have periods of overeating specially at night. I'm desperate now, I will try somethings from this article out, but if anyone out there has any information about any association of overeating anonymous, I would be deeply interested. The only problem is that I live in Honduras. Thanks to anyone that can help me.

(11)
Anonymous,
January 17, 2005 12:00 AM

congratulations

excellent article the words of your grandson are really the true we can learn from everybody tahnk you

(10)
Andrea,
January 17, 2005 12:00 AM

overeater's anonymous saved my life.

Overeater's anonymous saved my life. the 12 steps are an incredible coping skill when we put down our drugs of choice, in my case, food. the steps give me a way of living that is free from the slavery of compulsive eating. a threefold programme, focusing on the spiritual (non-religious) emotional and physical, we have a three legged stool that would tip over if it had fewer legs. at five two, my top weight was 270, and i am now at 200 with abstinence from compulsive eating since nov.3, 2003. Thank you g-d.

for more information see www.overeatersanonymous.org

(9)
Liora,
January 17, 2005 12:00 AM

experience

I hope the person that wrote the initial words of this article reads this, for my experience is much alike, but, finally, I've come to find a realistic response and way out: I'm over my thirties too and have been battleing against weight since my early teens. Very recently I reached the dead end point mentioned avobe. Really feeling it was out of my reach to solve the problem, yet, couldn't accept myself as an obese. I had tried everything, diets, pacts, doctors, prayers. Whenever I prayed, somehow I always got the response "it's in your hands", but it seemed not! I needed a miracle! I wanted God to take that desperate need for food one day when I woke up, and it never happened that way. One day I was casually talking with my Rabbi while waiting for his wife to come for dinner, and I told him about my problem and that it was beyond my capability to get over it. He simply said that God made us administrators of our bodies and we were responsible of how we managed this good, this job, this bussiness. That it was a matter of decision, strategy and practical, daily, effective work. Soon later I got to meet somebody (I'm single) in a Jewish dating site; we started to write each other for awhile and accorded to personally meet one specific day. I knew I had to look good, so, this pushed me to "just do it" (like the Nike adverstisement reads) without stopping to think or try to find out why I was fat, was it my destiny or what. I just didn't have the time. Just had to do it. So, first I made a written strategy for short terms like week by week. What and how to eat and a realistic (according to my posibilities) excercise program. And just did it. It has been quite a surprise to actually find out that it indeed was in my hands, because, when I had to do it, I did it, and now I'm on it for good. I look and feel great, and must of all, understood that this problem is indeed my yetzer hara and yetzer hara is a human condition that goes within us along the way for lifetime. The solution is not to make it disappear because it wont, but, to subject it, to put it under control and fight everyday to keep it this way and not let it control us. Every mitzvah is given for us to know how, practically we can put yetzer hara under control in each area concerned. If you make your own personal hallacha concerning your eating and excercising habits, and respect that as a religious trait (for it actually is, because if this thing is destroying us, it is sin), like kashrut, It will be less difficult to face. God gave us kashrut for example. But it's up to us to take it, and we are responsible for the consequences of our decision. A practical wonderful tip: before 12pm and after 8pm, the body works on processing and sending out the food it doesn't need, so, it's best for those hours to have nothing that would interfere with this process, which is: if you eat something, make it be only and alone fruits or vegetables, which don't interfere but actually help your body in this particular job. That really helps a lot. And try always to have a little less than what you desire. Hope this experience of mine helps you. Have success! HaShem has provided us with all the means to be succesful!

(8)
Anonymous,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

Overeating is a disease!

While this article is very thorough and sensitively written, it misses one key issue: Compulsive overeating is a disease. As such, it cannot possibly be addressed intellectually, rationally, or logically. Just as a person with diabetes cannot overcome their disease by superior thinking, a compulsive overeater will not get better by trying to psyche, shame, or analyze him/herself. That's the bad news. The good news is that there is a program, Overeaters Anonymous (www.oa.org) which is endorsed by many rabbis, including Rabbi Abraham Twerski, which really does work. Miraculous things have happend to people who work the OA program--people who had been trapped in the futile cycle of bingeing, dieting, and depression. My heart goes out to all those struggling with their weight and their eating.

(7)
shari,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

Registered Dietitian comment

Your advice is nice and light. As a Registered and Licensed Dietitian/nutritionist, I must tell you that people need to seek the help of a professional and not take annecdotal evidence from friends. She may need nutrition advice, health advice, or psychological advice. You didn't ask her questions to determine that. In over 10 years of weight loss work, I have seen more people become even heavier from wrong or poor advice. She needs to work 1 on 1 with a professional. The site "eatright.org" is the American Dietetic Association webpage.

(6)
Sheila Pratt,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

This was a very moving article written by a relective, intelligent lady. Much appreciated. I will email this on to two cousins who suffer from this disease of the soul, like me.

(5)
Anonymous,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

There IS a solution

Rebbeztin Feige is correct that overeating is often "feeling empty" and that "this may compel one to try to fill that emotional or spiritual void with binging on food, or whatever they think might fill the emptiness inside of them", but the TOOLS to fill that void, the everyday DO things that transform one's life spiritually and physically are found in the 12-step program of Overeaters Anonymous. Like all 12-step programs, this is not a "self-help" program but a spiritual one, completely Torah based, that offers recovery for those battling one of the many ways we "stuff" our empty spiritual hole. Insight alone (intellect and analysis) is not enough without the daily tools of OA that completely support Rebebetzin Feige's encouragement of Torah study, prayer and meditation.

(4)
Miryam,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

Wonderful article!

Thank you so much Rebbetzin Twerski for this wonderful article. I was starting to feel as the only person in the world with this problem, I'm too having a battle with overeating.

(3)
Deena,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

It is so complicated

I am a nutritionist. I meet with people struggling with this issue constantly. It is so difficult. The problem is very hard to deal with because of the environment in which we live that is extremely uncondusive to solving the problem. But my opinion is that the main reason for overeating is a deeper one (as is mentioned in the article). Most people today have a feeling of emptiness. There are many unconstructive ways to try and fill this emptiness. For example, drugs, alcohol, food, anger, etc. The problem with using food is that then it is so obvious to the world. But overeaters are no different than any of us who are trying to fill the void.

One other thing I would like to say is that the Rebbetzin mentions that no foods should be considered totally not allowed. I wouldn't take that kind of responsibility upon myself. I am constantly reading up on nutrition and there are definitely foods which are so terribly detramental to one's health that it is wrong to say, in such a simple way, that everything is allowed.

I would say that there are foods that one should realize are not ideal to eat but each person has to be realistic about where they stand. For each person, there is the ideal diet that one is striving for, and there are all the steps on the way.

It is hard work but it is possible to succeed! Be strong!

Deena

(2)
Anonymous,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

One can be taught self-body-shame

Contemporty society's biggest prejudice is against percieved over-weight. I have experienced abominable behavior when I was not even one pound over the medically recommended weight for my height and frame, and was left by someone who claimed to love me (a nice? Jewish dentist), for being less than 10% over the recommended weight. He said he could not be with someone who was not "slim." How does one overcome the pain of such treatment, and come to believe, once again, that we are worthy? Thanks for the article! It was good, but I don't think there was a realization of the seriousness of the bias and negative attitudes about ou failure to possess perfect bodies.

(1)
Anonymous,
January 16, 2005 12:00 AM

i am a member of Overeaters Anonymous which helps compulsive overeaters..meetings all over world including Israel..it is a 12 step program..it does work

My Christian friends are always speaking about “faith.” To me this sounds a lot like blind faith. Is that really the essence of religion?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

I'm afraid that this is another case of a Christian concept being mis-associated with Judaism.

Let's first define our terms. What is faith?

Webster defines faith as "Belief without proof."

What is knowledge? "An acquaintance with truth, facts or principles through study or investigation."

Faith is usually a product of desire. Have you ever gotten a tip on the market that guarantees you're going to triple your money in a month? A lot of smart people have gotten fleeced because they ignored the evidence and went with their feelings.

Knowledge, on the other hand, is based on evidence. We know there's a place called China because we have too many products in our house saying "made in China." There's a lot of evidence for the existence of China, even though most of us have never been there.

Judaism unequivocally comes down on the side of knowledge, not faith. In Deuteronomy 4:39, the Torah says: "You shall know this day, and understand it well in your heart, that the Almighty is God; in the heaven above and the earth below, there is none other." (This verse is also contained in the prayer, "Aleynu.")

This verse tells us that it is not enough to simply know in your head, intellectually, that God is the Controller of everything. You must know it in your heart! This knowledge is much more profound than an intellectual knowledge. God gave us a brain because he wants us to think rationally about the world, our role in it, and our relationship with God.

A conviction based on desire or feelings alone has no place in Judaism. The Hebrew word "emunah," which is often translated as faith, does not describe a conviction based on feelings or desire. It describes a conviction that is based on evidence.

Once this knowledge is internalized, it effects how a person lives. A person with this knowledge could transform every breathing moment into a mitzvah, for he would do everything for the sake of the heaven. But this is not a "knowledge," that comes easily. Only intensive Torah learning and doing mitzvahs can achieve this knowledge. Every word of Torah we learn moves us just a little bit closer to that goal. And everyone is capable of that.

To learn more, read "The Knowing Heart," by Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto (Feldheim.com). This entire book is an explanation of this verse!

In 350 BCE, the building of the second Holy Temple was completed in Jerusalem, as recorded in the biblical Book of Ezra (6:15). The re-building of the Temple had begun under Cyrus when the Persians first took over the Babylonian empire. The re-building was then interrupted for 18 years, and resumed with the blessing of Darius II, the Persian king whom is said to be the son of Esther. The Second Temple lacked much of the glory of the First Temple: There was no Ark of the Covenant, and the daily miracles and prophets were no longer part of the scenery. The Second Temple would stand for 420 years, before being destroyed by the Romans in 70 CE.

You shall know this day and consider it within your heart(Deuteronomy 4:39).

Business people who are involved in many transactions employ accountants to analyze their operations and to determine whether or not they are profitable. They may also seek the help of experts to determine which products are making money and which are losing. Such studies allow them to maximize their profits and minimize their losses. Without such data, they might be doing a great deal of business, but discover at the end of the year that their expenditures exceeded their earnings.

Sensible people give at least as much thought to the quality and achievement of their lives as they do to their businesses. Each asks himself, "Where am I going with my life? What am I doing that is of value? In what ways am I gaining and improving? And which practices should I increase, and which should I eliminate?"

Few people make such reckonings. Many of those that do, do so on their own, without consulting an expert's opinion. These same people would not think of being their own business analysts and accountants, and they readily pay large sums of money to engage highly qualified experts in these fields.

Jewish ethical works urge us to regularly undergo cheshbon hanefesh, a personal accounting. We would be foolish to approach this accounting of our very lives with any less seriousness than we do our business affairs. We should seek out the "spiritual C.P.A.s," those who have expertise in spiritual guidance, to help us in our analyses.

Today I shall...

look for competent guidance in doing a personal moral inventory and in planning my future.

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