Thursday, 9 July 2015

OK Ladies it's time for us to knock off the self critizism , self loathing and comparing ourselves .

Of course it can be really hard if we have had this critizism come from those who we thought we trust and love the most. For me I had from about the age of 4 years old a father that called me "two tonne tessy". To this day I never have known why he did it, but the pain it cuased me was immense. It made me over the years settle for less than I was worth- as it infact gave me no self worth at all. When I look back I realised why I settled for men who didn't treat me with the utmost respect. Luckily for me I had a mother who always supported me and loved me. My father loved me deeply too I am not saying he didn't just I had forgotten about it and what impact it had on my spirit until I was doing a workshop for releasing old traumas.

The critisizm did not stop with just my father. When I got to my first day of school it started again, "fatty fat fat" was the next attack. This was continued abuse at me for my first 3 years of school. I never retaliated, I am generally not that type of person. It did make me very unsure of people , and as I got older a very foul mouth. I found it better to call some one a "cunt" than attack there personal image.

Is it any wonder we compare , and belittle ourselves. THAT ALL CHANGES NOW !!

Firstly - if you compare yourself to let's say Beyonce - this woman works out constantly , has maids to do her house work, a nanny and can therefore dedicate herself to looking amazing full-time...oh and let's not forget a chef , dietician and personal trainer...I am already exhausted just writing about her lol.

This is only sustainable for the very wealthy. SO STOP COMPARING - it is the thief of joy - some famous yogi , guru type said that not me but i love it.

Secondly - YOU ARE IAGBAM .

If you have a partner who is complaining about your weight - get rid of him...if it is your husband then tell him to get you all the things beyonce has - that should shut him up. If you have children - cut yourself a break - you are being a provider and we know we put ourselves last on that one.

Thirdly- The media would have you believe that you MUST have a perfect body. Have you seen rebel Wilson or Tess Holiday? If not go google. These women look stunning and they are large, according to some morbidly obese - what the fuck does that mean anyway ?! SO was my mother and lived till 77!! One of the world's most adored sexiest women was Marilyn Munroe - a size 14/16 , look how healthy her face always looked too.

If we tell ourselves in a negative way that we are this or that our cells here us and take it on board. That's the scientific fact. Check out the "water bottle" experiment where they put HATE on one bottle and LOVE on the other- the effect was the hate one turned to brackish water the love one went crystaline! If you are in anyway a believer in god/ higher power etc then you are saying you are not part of the beauty of that creation. SO either way you are being mean to yourself.

If the fashion industry got off it's anorexic arse it would realise there is a fortune to be made in dressing the larger sizes- hey I want to wear Gaultier but he designs clothes for women with the body shape of a 10 year old boy....which accounts for about 8% of women who are actually that body type. If you look at all the famous people that are shoved in your face ( I choose not to buy women magazines) you will find out they all work out like fucking egyptian slaves. They probaly never eat chocolate( then it's not worth living) and never eat cake either.

When I as a size 12 I didn't actually realize I was most of the time. When I look back now - holy cow if i had kept that weight I would loook about 80 years old in the face right now.

I currently am the largest I have EVER been in my life...rockin around a size 22 . I have never felt more confident about who I AM. Why??.....
It took nearly 15 years for me to actually get the ceremony I did and embrace my " BAM" check out that blog http://iagbam.blogspot.com.au/2015/05/bam-beautiful-and-magnificent-this-cam.html - yes I am beautiful and magnificent and at this size I have rejected more men knocking on my door than ever...from young men to older. The thing is as the great Shirley Bassey once sang " i don't pop my cork for every man I see"...Why ?? because I am worth more- I have so much self respect and love for myself that no drunken , very handsome guy (recently OMG he was to drool over)is going to think I am a push over...Because I am not. And if you have read my single mother article you will know I don't get alot of chances to "get some" but for me now any sex has to be safe , has to be on my terms and because they are making me feel good not thinking I am an easy shag, oh and let's not forget AMAZING.

Forthly- (if there is such a word) When you are rocking in your spirit- got your BAM on men can feel it, so they are drawn to you...on the opposite side of it many women will hate you...we are so stupid sometimes getting caught up in this critisizing of each other.

What I have learned- you will hear it said- and it is SO TRUE ...only when you really love yourself will you get the love you are looking for - YOU ARE YOUR SOUL MATE !!!! SURPRISE !!! So when you realize you are an amazing creation you will stop looking for someone who is going to make yo believe that- wow I am tellin ya if some one had explained that to me at 18 I would have led a different life.

I am sharing what I know so you can find the some one who does treat you with love and respect and yes gives you butterflies, never PMD PMR or TMLS !!! - check out my song or the lyrics breakdown for those acronyms.

So stop the self sabotage, realize WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL AND MAGNIFICENT . There are loads of different women ,shape , color , size - be who you are - get away from those stupid magazines- have you noticed they tell you how to diet and then have the 12 page chocolate desert lift out??!!!

LOVE YOURSELF YOU ARE WORTH IT , YOU ARE AMAZING we all have days when we don't feel it but I am here to tell you , you can achieve it and be it

IAGBAM - repeat three times and say I LOVE YOU to yourself

Check out the clip on youtube, the link is there to buy it on iTunes also

No comments:

Post a Comment

About Me

VioletNight is ALL women. She is an aspect of ALL women and is my ultra ego super hero bringing SELF LOVE to all through her music and social media .At some stage in our lives we have wished to be upfront and say what we really think- NOW is that time . Violetnight is the champion of TRUTH , EQUALITY, JUSTICE AND SELF ESTEEM . She is keeping it real in an age where dating sites, tinder and Facebook, instagram keep us in a spiral of self judgement . Throwing concepts at women that can be damaging to their soul. Violetnight has a message for ALL women IAGBAM -I'm A Goddess Beautiful And Magnificent the acronym for the new millennium FOR ALL WOMEN