Fri December 13, 2013

Learn From Your Grandparents, Says Listener

I'm Michel Martin and this is TELL ME MORE from NPR News. Coming up, the Golden Globe nominations are in. We'll speak with film critic Wesley Morris about who got the nod, who was left out and why we care - if we care. But first, the envelope please - we've got your letters. It's BackTalk. That's where we hear from you about this week's stories. Editor Ahmad Omar is back with us for that. Welcome back, Ahmad. Thanks for joining us.

AHMAD OMAR, BYLINE: Thank you, Michel.

MARTIN: So what's going on today, Ahmad?

OMAR: So in our parenting conversation this week, we talked about parents and grandparents. And how they might have different rules. And how you can make that all work when you bring your kids over for the holidays. But one of our panelists, Leslie Morgan Steiner, had this to say about the differences in her values and those of her in-laws.

LESLIE MORGAN STEINER: My mother-in-law just excels at what I think of as the feminine arts. She's beautiful and thin and a great cook and a great housekeeper, and comes from a culture that very much believes that women are here - that the greatest joy in a woman's life is to take care of her family and particularly to serve men. And it's not what I value. And I've talked very frankly with all of my kids - my two daughters and my son - about the fact that it's not - the most important thing in the world is not being thin. It's not, you know, jumping up from the table to get, you know, everything that the men at the table want.

OMAR: Well, we got this letter from Mary Anne Robolino (ph) in Austin, Texas. She says what this woman perhaps does not realize is that it probably gives her mother-in-law joy to take care of her husband. And that in turn, her husband probably treats her in an equally loving way - albeit differently. Perhaps he's responsible for some of the more tedious tasks that she would rather not do. This lady would serve her children better if she simply pointed out the good things about her grandparents rather than tell them with what she disagrees.

MARTIN: Point taken, Mary Anne. Thank you for writing in. And, Ahmad, at this point I want to address another issue that a number of listeners raised. This was about a Beauty Shop conversation - a live Beauty Shop conversation that took place a week ago, Wednesday. At one point, a panelist said, Jesus Christ - in a joking way. We got a few letters from listeners who found that offensive. And we know that - for some people - that language is disrespectful of their faith. And we want to acknowledge that we know that. And we also want to thank you for pointing that out to us. And remember, at TELL ME MORE the conversation never ends. You can e-mail us, TELLMEMORE@NPR.org. You can follow us on Facebook or Twitter. The handle is @TellMeMoreNPR.

OMAR: And remember, Michel, our Twitter series about African-Americans stars in the tech world is going strong there. Check out the hashtag #NPRBlacksInTech for more on that. Or if you use Flipboard, the digital media aggregator, pages from the radio series and from Twitter and the web are all being curated there in a really nice visual way. So definitely check that out.