Deschooling

If You have just pulled your kids out of school or you are pulling them out in the coming weeks, this post is for you! How do help your kids transition from their school routine to being homeschooled? Some parents make the mistake of continuing school at home. This oftentimes results in confusing attitudes and behaviours from your child. This is completely normal for a child who is used to a school setting. Let us not forget that children are leaving behind all their friends as well as the only way of learning that they know.

Now that your child is coming home, you will be spending much more time with them. Get to know your child on a deeper level, be observant and discover their interests, learning style, their strengths and weaknesses. In public school, the relationship between teacher and student is very different from that of mother and child. Unlike the classroom, your child will have time for lengthy discussions and endless questions. Nurture the relationship you already have with your child and make sure they know you are a team. You are there to encourage, assist, teach and support. You will be your child's biggest cheerleader! You may want to consider taking some time (months to a year) to deschool!

"Deschooling specifically refers to that period of adjustment experienced by children removed from school settings. It also can include the process of deschooling parents; that is, the unlearning of concepts and beliefs about the nature and purpose of education. School based methods of instruction and thinking rarely translate directly into the homeschool, and where they are tried, often parents run into the same kinds of problems faced by teachers in schools! Children and parents need time to adjust to the new arrangement. Often this is best begun with a 'holiday' at home, a time to observe and record what naturally occurs in the child's life, and where additional resources are needed to introduce additional learning activities considered important and essential. It often takes many months, and sometimes even a year, for the process of deschooling to unfold. During this time it is a great idea to seek support from families who display a similar style of homeschooling to yourself. "—Beverley Paine, 1999

Keeping the following tips in mind should help prepare you for the transition from public school to homeschool. However, there may be times during the transitioning process when you will want to throw in the towel. If you are second-guessing your reasons for pulling your child out of public school, remember that the first year will more than likely be the hardest. There will be ups and downs, but in the long run there will be many more ups! Enjoy the journey and don't sweat the small stuff.

​Here are some tips that I have found useful :

Tell your child about deschooling. Be honest that homeschooling has a “break-in” period while the family is getting used to the new dynamics. Explain that during this time, your homeschooling will be developing, and it won’t look the same now as it will in a year or so. Tell you child that she or he will be able to make suggestions about how homeschooling will go. However, keep in mind that kids respond differently to this — some want to have influence right away while others may find it overwhelming after not having much input when they were school students. You may hear some “just-tell-me-what-to-do” as you attempt to get your child involved.

Go easy on the curriculum or formal academics. Give your child a break from formal, school-like lessons. If you need your child to complete some “work” so you’ll feel better, or if your child feels this way, you can certainly have some “school work.” Keep in mind, though, that discovering the curriculum or learning style that will work best for your child is a process, and deschooling will help you identify what will be most effective. Don’t spend a bucket of money on a curriculum at the outset. And remember that if you put yourself in the position of a classroom teacher, enforcing work that must be completed right from the beginning, you may get a lot of push-back from a child who is not used to seeing you in this role.​

3. Go places. One of the best things to do during deschooling is to make use of the new freedom to explore the world. Visit museums, historic sites, and galleries. Attend concerts, plays, and sporting events. Let your child help pick where to go and how long to stay. This experience in autonomy is a great way to help your child embrace the benefits of homeschooling.

4. Find homeschoolers. Network on Facebook, homeschooling email lists, check out our Calendar for our events and see if there is any event that may interest you or organise one yourself and let us know about it so we can spread the word. Keep in mind that not every homeschool group fits every homeschooler. It may take some time to find a group of people you are comfortable with so don't give up .

Homeschoolers are notorious for being unable to attend all the things they’d like to — so your child’s new best friend (or yours) might be coming to the next park day. Homeschooling can be a lonely journey for both mothers and children and it is easy to isolate yourself! We are lucky to live on a small island and with a little bit of effort we can support and hold eachother up when we start to fall.

5. Create, build, and engineer. Encourage your child to make art. Stock up on paints, clay, and craft supplies. Tell stories or write down your child’s stories and make them into a little books. If he’s always wanted to build a workbench or fort or raft, now is the time to go to the hardware store and get the supplies and start building. Let the figuring-out-how-to-do-it be the homeschooling.

6. Get back to nature. Visit your nearest natural area. Take a picnic, a camera, binoculars, a sketchbook — anything that might more fully connect your child to the outdoors. Use field guides to identify wildlife; set up a birdfeeder and start a list of birds you see there.

7. Get moving. Find ways to increase physical activity — hiking, swimming, backyard play, neighbourhood walks, organised sports or pickup games. Small-town gyms may let your child work out with you under your direct supervision, depending on the age and maturity of the child. Try both competitive and non-competitive approaches to activity, to see what interests your child.

8. Go to the library. Now your child has more relaxed time to browse, get to know the resources, chat with the librarian. Let your child select books and audiobooks. If your child has not been doing much independent reading, try pairing a book and its movie adaptation — which are probably both available at your library.

9. Read, read, read. Read aloud. You can try a snuggly version of reading — in bed or on the couch, but you can also read aloud while a child is building with Lego bricks or digging in the dirt. The deschooling period is a great time to model reading, as well. Let your child see you reading your own materials — novels, magazines, and news.​10. Volunteer. Find an area of interest and volunteer alongside your child. Many homeschoolers start out as parent/child dog walking teams at the local animal shelter, and you will find other great ways to help others through your church or a community organization. Service work is a great way for your child to develop compassion, feel herself doing something worthwhile in the world, and get connected to new people and concerns.

11. Watch documentaries and educational TV. A lot of kids have interests in topics that are covered by television programs. Now they have time to watch and learn about black holes, earthquakes, and the black plague. If you use an inquiry-based approach with your child, you’ll find that a lot of learning has taken place — and you haven’t even taught a lesson!12. Use the internet. Share interesting websites with your child. If age appropriate, encourage him to do searches on areas of interest and send you links to articles and videos. Make an interesting routine of checking an eagle cam or a panda cam. Watch TED talks. Try out some online games and educational sites. Discuss internet safety and responsibility.​13. Connect with relatives and other important people. Take advantage of the no-school routine to spend more time with grandparents, other relatives, and those close family friends who are especially meaningful to your kids. Your child might want to create a blog for family and friends to keep them informed about the interesting activities you’re doing together. Children who leave school may perceive a void at first because their days are not filled with the number of people they saw in school. They will still play with neighbourhood friends and see folks in Scouts or other activities, and they will keep up with their closest friends from school. They will make new friends in the homeschooling community. However, there is no substitute for a loving grandparent or special auntie — and it’s possible that your new homeschooling schedule will allow for more visits. Being with people who care about you is an especially good way to cope with transitions, and it helps kids realise the benefits and joy of cultivating high quality relationships rather than just having a high quantity of acquaintances. Of course, if your relatives are not supportive of homeschooling, you may have a different situation and, sadly, find you need to limit time with them so they don’t undermine your new efforts.

14. Cook and house-keep together. Children in school may have chores, but because they are gone from their homes 8 – 10 hours a day, they may become disconnected from the ways their contributions keep the household going. During deschooling, you may find value in the opportunity to plan meals with your daughter or son, shop for ingredients, cook together, and eat meals the child has contributed to. Learning life skills is grounding for a child. Take the time during deschooling to incorporate your child into the life and work of the home. This shouldn’t be just about cleaning bathrooms, but also about your child affecting the environment with her creativity and initiative — can she help design a reading niche in the living room? Can he pick wildflowers for the table?

​Points adapted from http://www.thehomeschoolmom.com/

Should you wish to read more about deschooling the book below is highly recommended.

Deschooling Gently will help you whether you are new to homeschooling, or if you are experienced, but are in need of new approaches. Discover the best way to educate your children at home, not through rote process, but by learning how to find the answer within yourself. This plan will provide confidence to trust your own educational decisions, a clear understanding of your children's needs and how to meet them, the ability to make calm and wise decisions about your children's education, a solid footing for starting the homeschool journey, and most importantly - concrete ideas on what to do now to make your transition to homeschooling smooth and painless.