Marine Helps Others To Overcome Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome

Lauren Schneiderman / Hartford Courant

Robert Estrada, a Marine who started a nonprofit called Endurance for Veterans, helps Veterans cope with PTSD through physical fitness. "A lot of my friends were dying from suicide and drug overdoses," Estrada said. Endurance for Veterans is a organization whose mission is to make the transition back into the civilian world easier.

Robert Estrada, a Marine who started a nonprofit called Endurance for Veterans, helps Veterans cope with PTSD through physical fitness. "A lot of my friends were dying from suicide and drug overdoses," Estrada said. Endurance for Veterans is a organization whose mission is to make the transition back into the civilian world easier.

(Lauren Schneiderman / Hartford Courant)

ERIK HESSELBERGSpecial to The Courant

You might not take the casually dressed Robert Estrada for a Marine. He has shed the high and tight "Recon" crew cut of the corps, yet he has maintained the alert, watchful gaze. He doesn't miss anything.

Estrada, 36, of Granby, served eight years in the Marines, rising to a sergeant in the Marine Security Guards, tasked with protecting U.S. embassies overseas. But it was the fearful atrocities he witnessed in the East Timor civil war of 1999 that came to haunt him years later.

His post-traumatic stress disorder only manifested itself after he left the corps and was well into his marriage with children to worry about. "I was depressed and began to isolate myself from other people," Estrada said. "My weight got up to 300 pounds."

Today, Estrada is back to his fighting weight of 180 pounds. The 6-foot tall veteran recently completed his second 26-mile Marine Corps Marathon in Washington, D.C. Therapy and a program of intense physical exercise helped alleviate his PTSD symptoms. What worked for him will work for others, he believes.

In 2015, Estrada formed Endurance for Veterans "to provide veterans the opportunity to improve their state of mind through physical fitness." The organization raises money to buy gym memberships and offer discounts at CrossFit facilities throughout the U.S. Endurance for Veterans also works to raise awareness about PTSD and suicide among military veterans.

The statistics are alarming, Estrada said. A study but the Department of Veterans Affairs found that from 1999 to 2010, roughly 22 veterans were committing suicide a day. It also showed that the suicide rate for younger veterans 18 to 29 was 86 deaths per 100,000 for men and 33 deaths per 100,000 for women. That's compared to 18 deaths per 100,000 for civilians.

Estrada, originally from Fresno, Calif, was gung-ho about the military, joining the Marines right after high school. His first deployment was to the U.S. military base in Okinawa, Japan, where served in the 9th Engineering Support Battalion. It was 1999. Estrada was 19.

This was nearly 10 years after the first Gulf War, a fairly quiet time for the U.S. military overseas. Then, in October 1999, Estrada became part of a U.N. peacekeeping mission in East Timor, a former Dutch colony at the eastern edge of the Indonesian archipelago.

Violence had erupted after the Timorese majority voted for independence from Indonesia, prompting a brutal crackdown by government-backed paramilitary forces. Thousands of citizens — men, women and children — were slaughtered in what has been described as a genocide.

Estrada said he witnessed beheadings and other atrocities. He recalls being sent to an elementary school that had been attacked by paramilitary groups, where children's corpses were strewn about. The Marine tamped down his emotions and moved on to the next mission. He spent four months in East Timor.

After that Estrada became a member of the Marine Security Guards, the elite units in white gloves and dress blues, posted outside U.S. embassies. He served two years in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia, as well as other places, always on alert with never much time to reflect. Estrada was honorably discharged in 2006.

The transition to civilian life was tough. "The military life is highly structured so it doesn't allow you much to stew over things," he said. "It was hard to adjust to civilian life. You had as lot of time on your hands. There was no one I could talk to about what I experienced."

Estrada got a job in computer security, turning his attention to combating cyberthreats. He said things didn't really hit him until after he got married in 2009, and his wife was pregnant with their first child. Estrada had taken a job overseas in Germany, where his family had moved.

It was after his daughter was born that he fell into depression. He had trouble sleeping and was fearful in crowds. The slightest noise made him jump.

His work allowed him to escape into technology. "There, I was comfortable – it was just me and the keyboard," he said. He became lethargic, and his weight ballooned to 300 pounds.

But as his children grew, they wanted a daddy to play with. They didn't understand why he always wanted to hide himself away.

Estrada said it was his image of himself as a father that convinced him to get help. "I began to feel embarrassed at the kind of image I was presenting to my kids," he said. "That convinced me to get help."

Estrada starting seeing a therapist. He also began CrossFit training, an exercise regime that mixes high-intensity aerobics with weight training. The workouts began to make a difference.

"There's a lot of camaraderie and support with CrossFit that is beneficial for veterans," Estrada said. "You feel you're part of a community."

Estrada said that Endurance for Veterans now partners with 130 CrossFit gyms in the U.S. The organization is planning a CrossFit event, the second annual Endurance for Veterans "Face Off" on April 29.

Estrada credits his all-volunteer Endurance for Veterans team for much of the success of the program. The team includes fitness director Stacey Pettit, endurance director Kate Coupe, fundraising director Kristie Pettit, veterans outreach director Eric Roy and social media director Alley Russo.

"They're a tremendous team," he said. "I could not have done this without them."

Estrada said the goal of Endurance for Veterans is to establish a permanent facility that would offer services free of charge to veterans. "The next step is to have a sustainable program," Estrada said. "We want to open this up to the community as well."

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