I totally understand that there are two sides of story and this is my side as I don’t care about other side as spending more than ten years in USA was nightmare for me.

It’s started when I needs to go out of station on some emergency and I asked my Ex-friend to take my wife to hospital for some check-up and we was not getting doctor appointment for next two months.

My Ex-friend wife was also out of country and I was trusting this bitch, she used to call her lover in front at her home by making some excuse like his birthday or marriage anniversary etc. She also pretend that I am her wife’s sister and I need to take care of her husband by fucking him.

Here are some signals I ignored but none of you should ignore it-

Virginity – I know now a days it’s not a big deal if girl is not virgin at the time of marriage as she was fucking someone else but these bitches should faithful to her husbands after marriage. If she is not virgin she may marry but will fuck someone else also after marriage and same thing happen in my case. These bitches only marries under parent’s pressure and get married status in society but they can never be trusted.

Keeping phone face up-side down – If your wife is keeping phone face up-side down it means she want to hide something from you , every time my wife got call or anytime she try to keep her phone face upside down.

Chatting in night – Is your wife chatting with some in 2 am and always says it’s her friend or relative she is cheater , she is chatting with her lover .

Calling cards – is she using calling cards even you have long distance in your phone, as I found calling card in her purse and she made some bull shit excuse.

Eye Contact – Has she stopped making eye contact when answering questions about where she has been and what she has been doing?

Pussy Hair design – When my wife was 8-9 month pregnant and we went to labour room, Nurse complemented her saying “Nice pussy design “after seeing her Pussy Hair design. No one who is 8-9 months pregnant can make that design and if not done by me then it was done by this bitch lover.

Event never happen – If any event happens with you and she tried to convenes you that it never happens then she is whore. When my tenant was leaving my house he passed a comment that “At least my wife is faithful to me “, I replied by saying that so do mine. and he said “you wish “. I saw my wife was begging & crying not to disclose her affairs in front of me and then Tenet wife said “We don’t care about whet your wife is doing”. This is first time I was shocked that how can my wife cheat on me even I gave her everything. When I asked why you was crying in front of Tenant she replied “I was afraid that whether I may hit tenant”. After 2 years she denied that this event ever occurred.

Chatting using girl name- She uses fake girl name to chat with her lover , I got doubt as when I caught her couple of time , she immediately get up and gave two missed calls to her lover as signal that I am back home .

Calling kids with lover name – My wife start calling my kids with her lover name several time in front of me and every time I interrupt her she immediately start fighting with me.

Uncle came home – Whenever my kids told me that Uncle came home and I asked my wife about it she start scolding my kids so next time they don’t tell me.

Offensive language against parents – On my mother’s birthday when my father posted celebration pictures on Facebook , this whore used VOIP phone and called her sister in India and for more than one hour she used offensive language against my parents without any reason , off Couse I disconnected VOIP phone same moth.

I am doing everything for my kids – This whore always said that I am doing everything for my kids and when I asked her to come back to India with kids so they can get admission in good school she refused to do so , you can see how much this whore loves her kids.

Property – Never add your wife in your property as second owner as I added her in good faith that if anything happen to me she will live with her kids but when I decided to come back to India for good she started blackmailing and I was never able to sell my house. My house went to foreclosure because of my bitch wife.

Not able to sell property – As she made her mind to give me divorce and I was perfectly okay with that she made each and every attempted so I can’t sell property . She started keeping home dirty including bathroom. Agents was scolding me to have home cleaned before I put in market.

Making image – As you all know if anything goes wrong in Indian couple everyone point figure towards husband that it’s his fault . She uses same logic to show that she is victim and she is bechari Indian wife to get sympathy from everyone.

Make Personal things public – This bitch made each and every personal thing public to get sympathy and destroy my image. Anything happen to my house made public by this slut.

Not ready to come back to India – When I put my house after spending more than US $ 10000/- in renovation she start blackmailing that she will not going to stay with my parents in India and I have to rent seprate house . I made very clear to this bitch that I will stay with my parents only. I booked flight ticket for my family after losing my job because of environment created by this bitch at home.

Called 911 – She called 911 to have me arrested , police came to my home but didn’t arrested me as I didn’t do anything and went back but same say I decided that I can’t stay in this home after this much of humiliation and insult.

Threaten to call police – My whore wife threaten me to call police and put me in jail several time in fake case, as I was not aware of US laws I also got scared but then I took help of attorney and she told me that no one can arrest me until they have any proof . After talking to my attorney whenever my bitch wife threaten me to call police I told this bitch that yes sure go ahead.

Sexual Deviations – Does she want sex less often than usual? Does she seem to just be going through the motions? Is she asking for things you never did before or teaching you new tricks? Is she making pussy hair design if not for you then for whom? How is your sex life? Has she ever initiated sex after marriage if not then she is fulfilling her sex desire with someone else. Doesn’t want sex. He may not reject you, but he’ll go along with your rejections where he may have previously fought them. Now it’s like, “Sure, let’s watch a movie instead. Noooo problem.”

She places the focus on you – When you do ask her questions, she turns the tables on you. Once a motor mouth, it now seems her batteries have run out, and when you ask her how her night was, mum’s the only word. It’s now all about you, you, you, rather than “I did this” and “I went here last night.”

Lie, Lie and Lie – If she lies and defend herself for that lie, even it’s a small lies for anything – She is a bitch.

Just do opposite – If she does just opposite what you say, it means she is fucking someone else.

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11 comments

Cheating is not a big deal for modern Indian women. I come close to my friend’s wife when my friend needs to go out of station on some emergency.

My wife was also out of country and I needed a whore to fxxk. As her husband was trusting her, she used to call me in front of her husband, at her home by making some excuse like my birthday or marriage anniversary etc.

I am still in touch with her through messenger , social media . I also have some magic jack phones which I use to call her.

I know many people would look at me and feel disgust or sadness if they knew my secrets, and perhaps they should. I feel these things toward myself often.

My marriage has never been perfect, on either end, but my husband believes me to be faithful for the better part of the last eight years. I lie to him, or rather, omit the truth. I have cheated on him with five people in the past two years, and more before that.

I seek them out. Sometimes online, sometimes I meet them casually at a bar. I have been blessed (or cursed) with good looks, charm, humor, and a vulnerability that draws men to me. I know this, and I use it to get my fix. I know exactly what I need to do to get a specific man in bed with me. If I’m at a bar, I even know what kind of drink I should order to pique his interest. It’s a science to me, and I have my PhD.

I’m not a sex addict, I’m not looking for love (my husband gives me both regularly). For me, it’s a form of self-medicating a traumatic childhood. Yet it does not work, as it only leaves me feeling angry, empty, and filled with more self-loathing.

My upbringing was inconsistent, and horrifically verbally and physically abusive, in particular from my father. So, yeah, I have daddy issues. Seriously fucking huge daddy issues. I have struggled with bipolar disorder for years, which I believe was triggered by both genetics and childhood trauma.

My husband loves me, but somehow it’s not enough. I rationalize why it’s OK to cheat. He was obsessed with porn early in our marriage to an unhealthy level, he neglects me, he doesn’t consult me for major decisions, he is often far away, etc. Some of these reasons may be legitimate enough to end a relationship, but I am not emotionally prepared to leave him or to turn my children’s world upside down, so I simply use those reasons as validation for my cheating.

His love is grounding to me, and I need it, however dysfunctional it may be at times. The fleeting touch of other men is reassurance that I am still desirable, nothing more. It’s a cheap, temporary ego boost. It counteracts the years of verbal venom my dad spewed at me, telling 12-year-old me I was trash, a worthless whore. Yet, I wonder, what have I become?

“How could you have done this to me, to us? Who are you and who did I marry?” With tears in his eyes, my ex-husband shouted and screamed these questions at me on the day he found out that I’d had an affair. All the while, I stood there shaking, in shock, not knowing what to say that would make what I had done right. I was a cheater.

Looking back, I realize that nothing in that moment would have given him the solace and comfort that he was looking for — or that I was looking for. His care and love had been transformed into disdain and hate for the monster I had become to him.

The question that came up repeatedly after our marriage dissolved was “Why?” Why did I cheat on him? Why would I do such a thing to a man who was caring, funny and generous? It wasn’t like he beat me up or anything like that.

If you are reading this and judging me, you are within your rights. No one judged me more harshly than I did, and even now, although it all turned out for the best, I wouldn’t go down that road again — even though I can completely understand why any women would.

1. My mindset. I was still living with the illusive notion that happiness was something that I could acquire from an external source; I bought into a fantasy. It’s a fantasy that I see a lot of my clients buy into, which is that there is a fairy tale man that exists to bring happiness to them. This is just not true.

Back then, I bought into the notion that because I wasn’t happy, someone else could dish happiness up on a silver platter. As my ex husband was not able to, someone else could surely, right? This of course wasn’t true and to this day, it still isn’t. In fact, the whole ordeal stressed me out and exposed me to more confusion and unhappiness.

Lesson learned: Being part of the cheating women club, I understand now that running away from myself was not the answer and that I am responsible for my own happiness and fulfillment. My happiness is, under no circumstances, anybody else’s responsibility — least of all whoever I am in a relationship with.

2. The guilt factor. I honestly believed I was a bad person for thinking that I no longer fancied my ex husband, so as not to hurt him, I kept quiet. I couldn’t find the words to tell him that I no longer found him sexually attractive. I was scared that he would finally find out that I was that “bad person” I judged myself to be. Instead of being able to confront him with my feelings and thoughts that “only bad people” have, I engaged in “bad person” behavior, hoping he wouldn’t find out. I believed that I was not worthy of someone loving me as much as my ex husband did.

Lesson learned: What I now realize is that our beliefs about how we see ourselves can lead us to do some crazy things. Belief systems can be powerful catalysts for behavior, and sheds some light on why women cheat. By working on myself, I was able to finally overcome this pattern and now find myself in a loving relationship.

3. Lack of maturity and knowledge. Looking back, I realize now that I didn’t have the maturity or the tools needed to live with the problems that my ex-husband and I had at the time. We would argue, get upset and as a result, our communication broke down and so did our intimacy. I didn’t know how to manage the dynamic nor manage my thoughts about them either. Any time we argued, I honestly believed that he didn’t love me. So, I acted out to get my own back.

Lesson learned: It’s important to keep the communication channels open because once you sense that they aren’t, intimacy can easily slide away. Before you know it, you are yearning for intimacy deeply. I have often heard that wives who cheat did so because of this communication break down. It’s important to learn about relationships with courses or even coaching.

4. The passion died. At the time, I remember feeling that the passion had died in our relationship. I wanted to feel that my ex husband longed for me, that he wanted me and that he wanted to woo me. Our relationship fell into a day-to-day routine, lacking excitement and passion. I wanted to break free from this and thought that the best way was to do it through a selfish act.

Lesson learned: I now realize that passion outside of the relationship was only ever going to be short lived, which in this case it was. Working on what we had — which was a lot — would have probably been the best option.

All of these reasons may sound like excuses, and you know what? Cheating was a selfish act. I will be the first to admit it. I could have chosen not to do what I did, but if I put myself in the shoes of that young girl, at that time, I really felt that cheating was the solution.

If you are a woman who is contemplating cheating or a woman who has cheated, I ask you to contemplate what it is that is bringing on these feelings and what provoked you to act on them.

It all started back in March on a trip with my husband and a group of friends. One of the guys on the trip has been a friend of my husband for quite some time. We had a fun time partying and hanging out. When we returned from our weekend trip, I could not stop thinking about him. So I texted a mutual friend who was also on the trip and revealed my feelings to her. She ended up telling him! A few weeks later she invited me to meet her at a bar and in the meantime he called and met us there. We ended up talking more, flirting, and eventually we kissed. For the next couple weeks we texted each other, mainly steamy conversations. Then it abruptly stopped because he said he couldn’t do this anymore to his friend (my husband). But he would call us every weekend to go out and naturally I would. He would bring various girls with him as dates and admittedly I was a bit jealous. But over the 4th of July weekend the texting started again and things got very steamy. We have already had sex twice and the texting continued. We even went out one night and I had the time of my life. The night after we went out, he had a party at his house and invited a girl over. They were all over each other and I was insanely jealous. But I was at his house with my husband so I had to deal with it. Now the texting has stopped and I feel so used. He is, by the way, married but in the process of divorcing his pregnant wife. He also has a reputation as a player. I can’t figure this one out. I have a handsome, faithful husband who is an excellent father and provider. Am I just bored? The texting and sneaking around was a thrill. I don’t feel guilty about the cheating, but I feel bad that I haven’t heard from this guy.

1. “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You.”
If you hear these words, a big warning bell should go off. This is one of the most consistent things a cheating spouse will say. Your spouse may have a deep, loving bond with you but, intense feelings of passion can override the bond with you and cause your spouse to lose sight of his/her true feelings. The cheating spouse will develop what I call hormone – induced amnesia. The surging hormones and passion they feel in their new relationship can cause some very skewed thinking.

2. “We are just friends.”
This is also another very predictable statement that will come from a cheating spouse. If your spouse is spending more and more time with this new “friend”; then there is probably more to it than mere friendship. Your spouse may feel they have a lot in common with this person, that this person understands them and things they are going through. Whatever the reasons for the friendship, it’s a big warning sign and one you should take seriously.
3. A sudden need for privacy.
If things the two of you used to share openly suddenly become private pay attention cause something is probably up. He/she may start password protecting computer activity. Cell phone and credit card bills may be hidden. If you ask why or attempt to find out information that used to be common knowledge between the two of you, you will be accused of snooping or trying to control your spouse. Big warning sign!

4. “I need some space to figure out my feelings.”
Men and women who are involved with someone else will request more space, time alone or away from the family. They may say it is due to confusion over their feelings or stress at work. This can be a sign that there is someone else and the spouse is trying to figure out ways to have more freedom.
5. Regular work habits change.
Working late, going to work at odd hours or, putting in more time than is normal on work related issues can be indications that a spouse is cheating.
6. Spending a large amount of time on the computer.
In today’s world, with modern technology, a person looking for an affair doesn’t even have to leave their home. The ease of internet chat rooms, online dating sites and secret email accounts has caused an alarming increase in emotional affairs.
If your spouse is online more than usual, hanging out in chat rooms and visiting pornographic websites then you have reason to be alarmed.
7. Secretive phone calls and more time spent on the phone.
Emotional affairs occur primarily via the phone, especially cell phones. If you find your spouse hanging up suddenly when you enter the room or erasing the history on the cell phone and becoming defensive when asked about it, then you might want to check your phone records.
8. Behavior that just doesn’t add up.
Not being where he/she was expected to be. Missing time they can’t explain. Money that isn’t accounted for. Receipts for things you don’t have. Missing clothing. Clothing that does not belong to your family. Being caught in little lies about the details of the day. If something is off with their behavior, you should suspect cheating.

9. Your Own fears and suspicions
If you find yourself looking for excuses for your spouse’s behavior or trying to convince yourself that they would never cheat then that is a warning sign. Your intuition is frequently one of the best indicators that something is wrong. If you suspect your spouse might be cheating on you, do some investigating and then talk to him/her about what you’ve found. Do it in a way that is calm and courteous. Ask for honesty. Be prepared for lies. It is a sad fact that people having affairs become excellent liars. People who never told a lie before in their lives. Trust your gut instinct but get hard, cold proof also.

When you see lipstick on your husband’s shirt or strange hairs on their clothing or in the car.

Sign 1–Gut Instinct:
?The telltale sign of a cheating spouse? Having to ask that question in the first place.
?Your cheating husband or wife stops confiding in you and seeking advice from you.
?Your intuition (gut feeling) tells you that something is not right.
?You find intimate apparel or other small gift-type items that are gifts for someone else and have not been given to you.

Sign 2–Behavior That Is Not Their Usual Character:
?When your partner shows up without their wedding ring or suddenly stops wearing it and makes lame excuses as to why. This also goes for jewelry you might have purchased for them and you catch them not wearing it when they go out when usually they wear it at all time.
?When they break their established routine at work and home for no apparent or logical reason; erratic behavior.
?When your mate becomes suddenly forgetful and you have to tell him/her everything several times; their thoughts are obviously elsewhere.
?When they appears distant, show a lack of interest, or develop an unexplained aloofness that wasn’t there before.
?When their behavior just doesn’t add up.
?When your wife sleeps with her purse by the bed, or your husband sneaks out of the house.
?When your spouse suddenly starts completely ignoring you and not listening to what you are saying -OR- when they suddenly begin to treat you extremely nicely…more so than usual.
?When they encourage you to have a social life and go places out of town, and it seems like they’re trying to get you “out of the house.”
?When your husband or wife begins to intentionally look at or flirt with the opposite sex when in the past, this is something they would not have done.

Sign 3–Birth Control:
?When you find birth-control pills in the medicine cabinet, and you’ve had a vasectomy -OR-
?When you find condoms in the car or in his pockets, and you are on the pill.

Sign 4–Showering/Cologne:
?When he or she leaves the house in the morning smelling like their usual fragrance and returns in the evening smelling like something else.
?When they arrive home and head straight into the shower or bath, and they work an office job.
?When your spouse’s clothes smell of an unfamiliar perfume or after-shave used by the opposite sex
?When he or she has worn the same fragrance for years, and suddenly they are wearing something new and wearing MUCH more than usual.

Sign 5–Uncomfortable Around You:
?When your mutual friends start acting strangely toward you, because they either know about the cheating or have been told stories about what a horrible spouse you are.
?When your spouse’s co-workers are uncomfortable in your presence, because either they know about the afair or have heard horror stories to justify it.
?When your spouse seems less comfortable around you and is “touchy” and easily moved to anger.
?When your spouse avoids social events with you, as if they want to cover up that they are with you.

Sign 6–Electronic Clues:
Email clues~
?When your spouse sets up a new e-mail account and doesn’t tell you about it.
?When your spouse spends all their time on the email, checking their email, or fooling with email somehow.
?When your husband or wife suddenly deletes all emails from the email account (and it’s not just a clean up) and in the past they used to let them accumulate.
?When they delete an email the minute it comes in, and then delete the trash to make sure you don’t see it.

Cell phone clues~
?When s/he buys a cell phone and doesn’t let you know about it.
?When your husband or wife suddenly deletes all messages from the voicemail where as they used to accumulate.
?When they suddenly delete all caller IDs from the phone so you can’t see them.
?When s/he sets up a separate cell phone account that is billed to the office.
?When you aren’t allowed to ever look at or use their cell phone, and they go to great lenghts to make certain their cell is not answered by you.
?When your spouse is secretive about their cell phone and it is on their person 24/7, and they are on it talking or texting that whole time.
?When they receive bizarre text messages from friends you never realised knew–in other words having ‘pretend’ names in their phone that are really the OP.

Computer signs~
?When they stay up to “work” or “play a game” on the computer after you go to bed. Excessive internet usage, especially late at night, is a red flag.
?When your spouse will not allow you access to their computer or they suddenly shut down the computer when you walk into the room.
?When they may password protect their laptop or computer to keep out suspicious eyes.
?When she or he warily guards access to their chatrooms, chat logs, games, Facebook page, or other social media.
?When your spouse has unusual sites showing in the “browser history” (such as “adultfriendfinder” or “ashleymadison”), or erases their history after each late-night session.

Sign 7–Things Are Just Different at Home:
?When your spouse raises hypothetical questions such as, “Do you think it’s possible to love more than one person at a time?”
?When they have a sudden desire to be helpful with the laundry (and they never have before) and it’s like they’re trying to find or hide something.
?When he/she shows a sudden interest in a different type of music that they really disliked before.
?When your spouse loses attention in the activities in the home and seems forgetful, distracted or like they don’t care.
?When he/she has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home…including the children.
?When you notice that your partner loses their ability and desire to show the children the attention they need or a lack of desire to do any fix-ups around the house, e.g., lawn care, painting, cleaning the garage, house repairs, etc. They might turn this around on you at the same time and accuse you of never doing anything or treating the child/children badly.
?When they are always tired or demonstrate a noticeable lack of energy or interest in the relationship.
?When they sleep on the sofa some of the night.
?When you two don’t go to bed together, and they tell you not to wait up when you have always done so.
?When your spouse suddenly asks about your schedule more often than usual–wanting to know where you’ll be and when.
?When they talk to you they treat you abusively or with disdain, disrespect or excessive sarcasm. Or. . . they may begin to find fault in everything you do in an attempt to justify their affair.
?When your spouse is exceedingly critical and sometimes mocking you.
?When your spouse becomes “accusatory,” asking if you are being true to him/her, usually out of guilt.
?When they begin to speak more and more harshly to you, or are more sarcastic. Sometimes this is just an attempt to justify their cheating…or to give them an excuse to storm out of the room/house.
?When you notice that they are reluctant to kiss you or accept your affection and/or they criticize you for showing attention.
?When your spouse ignores or criticizes your loving behavior and thoughtful ways. Example : “Why are you so luvy duvy? I’m just not like that.”

Sign 8–Lots and Lots of Changes:
?When s/he joins the gym and begins a rigorous workout program and “hated” exercise before.
?When your spouse buys new, sexy underwear and you never see it.
?When they have a sudden preoccupation with their appearance.
?Her: When she gets spiffed up and dresses provocatively to “go grocery shopping” or to “get her hair done.” She may also show up with a sudden change of hair style. Him: When he showers, shaves (cologne, deodorant, etc.) and dresses up more than usual to “go out with his buddies” or to “go fishing.”
?When your spouse begin to make sudden and excessive purchases of clothes or an unexplained change in clothing style (for example, from business professional to steampunk).
?When they show a sudden interest in a different type of music that they always hated before.

Sign 9–Telephone Mannerisms That Are Different:
?When your spouse receives “mysterious” phone calls that don’t seem to make sense–and when you ask who called, they say, “No one”, “Wrong number”, or “Why do you care?”
?When YOU get an increasing number of hang-ups or “wrong numbers” when you pick up the phone especially if the caller hangs up after hearing your voice and doesn’t speak. Generally when a person dials a “wrong” number, they will at least ask, “Is Fred there?” before hanging up.
?When your phone bills show unexplained toll or long distance charges. Often you’ll find one phone number listed excessively.
?When s/he Hurriedly picks up the phone to answer it before you do.
?When they leave the room to talk on the phone.
?When your spouse Whispers while on the phone.
?When s/he deletes the information (name and phone number) from “caller ID”.
?When they behave differently or end the telephone call abruptly when you enter the room…or appear to hang up quickly.
?When your spouse tells you to get ahold of him or her at a different telephone number (they don’t want you calling while they’re with the OP).

Sign 10–Automobile Related Signs That Something is Up:
?When the passenger’s seat is adjusted differently than you had left it.
?When your spouse takes the child seat and/or kid’s toys out of the car for no particular reason.
?When you find suspicious items in the car like phone numbers, receipts, lipstick, condoms or strange hairs in the vehicle.
?When they begin to keep a change of clothes hidden in the trunk of the car or an unusual amount of clothes changes at the gym.
?When the car has unexplainable mileage or a lack of additional mileage. For example, if your husband states that he went out of town yet the odometer indicates that only a distance of 25 miles had been driven. Conversely, if he says that he’s only been to the office that day, yet their odometer shows many more miles had been driven, this too, may be a significant matter.
?When s/he “goes to the store for groceries” or “goes to get some gas” or “goes to the bank” (a task that should take just a few minutes) and comes home 5 hours later.
?When you notice increased gas purchases that are inconsistent with the amount of miles on the car.

Sign 11–Paper Trails of a Cheating Spouse:
?When you find credit card receipts for gifts you didn’t receive -OR- your credit card bills itemizes gifts you didn’t receive (such as florist or jewelry).
?When you find the credit card receipts showing purchases from places unknown to you or that seem suspect -OR- when your credit card bill itemizes odd places.
?When you see an increase in ATM withdrawals on your bank statement, especially those from out-of-town.
?When you find ATM receipts bearing a time/date stamp from a city you don’t recognize. [Cheating costs money! To play you must pay.]
?When they begin to volunteer to go to the post office, rushes to check the mail before you do or opens up a new P.O. box perhaps without even telling you.
?When unusual phone numbers appear on the phone bill.
?When the duration and time of the calls on the phone bill appear excessive.
?When they are secretive about their cell phone bill or they start to pay it themselves.
?When you notice business travel or other deductions on their expense account for travel or other expenses of which you were not aware.

Sign 12–Sex Tip-offs That Something’s Wrong:
?When s/he is no longer interested in sex, or s/he makes excuses for its infrequency.
?When your spouse starts to request kinky or other erotic sexual activity (behavior) that you’ve never done before, including watching porn.
?When they show a “new talent” in the bedroom (that they might have learned from the individual with whom they’ve been cheating).
?When s/he appears reluctant to kiss you, or show affection toward you.
?When your spouse continues giving poor excuses for why they’re not in the mood to make love.
?When they have unexplained scratches or bruises on his or her neck or back.
?When s/he suddenly wants more sex, more often.

Sign 13–Work-related Signs That They May Be Cheating:
?When s/he works longer hours, more frequently
?When they supposedly work a lot of overtime, but it never shows up on the pay stub.
?When they change their established routine with no apparent reason.
?When s/he begins discouraging you from calling him or her at work.
?When your spouse is often “unavailable” when you try to call him or her at work.
?When they returns calls long after you leave a message for him or her.
?When s/he prefers to attend work functions (or any events) alone and tries to discourage you from attending.
?When your spouse takes more trips for business reasons and even refuses to let you drive him or her to the airport.
?When you find out by accident he or she took vacation day or personal time off from work – but supposedly worked on those days.
?Your spouse is away from home, either nights or on trips, more than previously.
?When the amount of money being deposited into your checking account drops off.
?When they are late home from work and always have an excuse ready.
?When s/he claims to be stressed with work problems when questioned about their odd behaviour.

Sign 14–Things you’ll hear:

1. “We are just friends.”
2. “I need you to respect my privacy.”
3. “I Love You But I’m Not In Love With You.”
4. “I need some space to figure out my feelings.”

I have been married for eight years and have been cheating on my husband for seven of them. I am 25, and he is 37. We have children together. My rendezvous started out as kissing one of our mutual friends, and has escalated all the way to going to sex websites to find people and sleeping with other married people.

I have cheated “all the way” with four people, two of them being female. I have gone as far as to have a three way with one of my girlfriends and her husband. What’s really sick about that one is that they were both in my wedding. I have recently gotten a married man to leave his wife to be with me, but then I backed out at the last minute . . . They got divorced because of it.

I am constantly fantasizing about other people and crazy sexual situations. My husband and I do not have sex anymore. He is not able to “perform,” and when he does, it is usually less than a minute. We focus on the kids and regular family things. I have told him that he and I are emotionally detached, but neither one of us knows what to do about it. I sometimes enjoy having this freaky, sexual secret life . . . But I worry that I am going to end up hurting my children. I want to stop and be the wife that I’m supposed to be, but I would also like to get f*cked at least once a week. I am 25, not 75. What do I do?

I can’t believe this happened. My husband and I have been married for over two years. I consider our marriage solid, great, and fun. No complaints at all.

We are good friends with another married couple. The guy and my husband have known each other forever and through him I met his wife. She and I have become best friends. We socialize all the time.

Earlier this week my husband left on a business trip that should get him back home on Friday. On Monday, my girlfriend invited me over to their house for a bbq. There were lots of people there but by the end of the evening it was just me and our friends couple. All three of us were very drunk and played a stupid game called Never Have I Ever and it turned toward sexual themes. Turns out I haven’t done alot of sexy things even though a few of them have been discussed in private with my husband.

When I admitted that I had never kissed a girl, my girlfriend leaned into me and kissed me on the lips. For some reason I kissed back. Before I really had any time to think, she and I were making out. At some point her husband joined in. I ended up having sex that night with our friends.

I think we all eventually passed out. When I woke up in the morning I realized what had happened and kind of freaked. I went to the kitchen and found the guy looking shocked and sort of crying. He said he couldn’t believe we did that and how wrong it was and that he and my husband are best buds. I agreed that it was waay wrong but didn’t know what else to say. I left and went home and we have not talked since

I am a 26 year old woman, I am pretty and I have a nice profession and a secure job.

Four years ago I married my husband for love.

He is a very sexy man and he likes women a lot. I knew this before, but I guess I thought that after he marries he will become a new man, besides I was madly in love with him and he was in me.

We lived very well. Of course we had our arguments like every other normal family, but we always found ways to solve all our problems.

Recently though, I started noticing this specific sparkle in his eyes when he scaned young girls. And they will in return look him over. At the beginning I was amused, I was proud with him, it was a nice thought that I owe him, that he is MINE. But I guess I overestimated my capabilities to have him only for myself.

To cut the long story short, I understood in a second that he was cheating on me. I went crazy!

What I hated most was that he was replacing them very often.

After a mad argument, my husband solemnly swore that he would stop with his love adventures, that he can’t imagine his life without me. I trusted him, because he was so miserable and….sweet. But only after half a year it all happened again.

Then it dawned on me to pay him back and make him feel betrayed, just like I felt.

I decided to cheat on him, what is more I have my way and am quite successful with guys. I chose my “candidate” – young and good-looking, and I knew he liked me for some time.

I went to bed with him, but I did not feel at all relieved. On the contrary, I felt worse. I felt I have lost not only my marital honor, but also my self-respect.

I am 30 years old and have been married to my husband for three and half years. We do not have any children. Basically, our entire marriage has been centered on his dreams, needs and wants while everything else is just simply insignificant.
Shortly after we were married, his true colors began to shine. He became very controlling, selfish and never deemed it necessary to compromise.

Three months after marriage, we learned that he was accepted into a rigorous medical program out of state. So we left our large of group of friends and family and moved to a town barren of people our age and things to do (yes, I live in the boonies). We moved into a house on 100 acres which is peaceful but quite isolated. Knowing that school would have to be his #1 priority, I had nothing else to concentrate on except for my career (Social work/psych field) which eventually began taking its toll. The first year was tough, we rarely spent quality time together and when we tried he was always irritable. I was so lonely and missed all of the social interaction that we had in our hometown. I never met many new people that would become our friends. The only social outlet that I had was work.

There have been several major pivotal breaking points in this marriage but I will only cover two because they will give you enough of a glimpse as to what this marriage has been like.
One day, he began talking about a girl that had just entered his program who had just moved here and didn’t know anyone. So I began inviting her over for dinners and there was just something about her that I couldn’t pinpoint but I knew I couldn’t trust her. Women’s intuition can be quite powerful. But we didn’t have friends like mentioned before so I thought I’d give this a try anyway. Long story short, she was highly promiscuous and would flirt with him directly in front of me. It just so happens that we know her neighbors and one day the neighbor called me and said, “I just want you to know that I’ve seen his car over at her house almost every day and I thought you should know.” When I confronted him, he was very defensive, saying they were friends and he can do what he wants. I told him that she is welcome to hang out with us when we are together but I didn’t feel comfortable with them spending time alone. He yelled and screamed and told me how insecure I was. The next week, I went to a wedding out of town (alone). I called him and he wouldn’t answer. I knew where he was. He said nothing happened. I don’t believe it to this day. Then about 7 months ago he hit me. I felt so violated and disrespected. My attraction towards him began to diminish while my anger and resentment began to rise. After threatening divorce, he finally went to counseling. I told him that If he didn’t stay committed to working on his anger with a counselor that I would leave. He only went to three sessions (which began 2 months ago).

About 6 months ago, my husband made a friend with whom I will call John. The first time I met him, I thought that he was slightly attractive but never thought anymore about it until later. He fit in with us perfectly and my husband and I became friends with him instantly. He was very personable, caring, genuine, sincere and fun to hang out with. He began coming to our farm every weekend (fri-sun) and spending the night. He was such a joy to have around for both my husband and I because not only did we have a social outlet but he distracted us from our turmoil.

Well, I’m afraid that some of you may think that I’m crazy for saying this but I am a very intuitive person. I can get a feel for most people rather quickly. The reason why I tell you this is because I began to sense him strongly. In fact I had a dream about him that involved something happening to him when he was 8 yrs old (this has never happened before). So I guess my attraction or curiosity began during this time period. One evening, he and I sat on the porch and talked about his past and the hard times he has been through. I told him about the dream I had (jokingly) and he said that it was absolutely true. After that evening, I felt a strong MAGNETIC pull towards him that I couldn’t stop. I had never felt it before.
He and I began to get into deep conversations about life, pain, ideas and dreams. Sometimes my husband was sitting right next to us and other times he went to bed early (who was sleeping in another bed by choice). It was so nice to have a companion. He listened to me and actually cared what I had to say. I hadn’t had that type of communication with my husband in years.
The more I got to know him, the more I wanted to be around him. I knew that my feelings began to change when I couldn’t stop thinking about him. I began to feel guilty and it began weighing me. When he would come over, I would try to avoid him by going in my room or walking around the property but this didn’t work. I was freaking out internally because I knew that my mind had already crossed a line. I didn’t want to be attracted to him. Believe me when I say that feeling attracted to him was tearing me up inside and I didn’t know what to do. That magnetic force was INTENSE and I felt like it was out of my control. My gut told me he was feeling it too but never thought anything would happen b/c he was such an honest and humble guy.

About two weeks ago, my husband went out of town for a week and half and he had told John that he could stay at the house with me (b/c john had to work near our farm that week). Naturally, I was freaking out and didn’t know what to do. I knew it was a bad a idea. So one night he came over and…….
The majority of the night was like usual in that we talked like dear buddies. He was telling me how he wanted to get back with his ex and how he was thinking about moving in 6 months, etc.. We began drinking a lot of wine while we talked on the porch. Then he told me that my husband said it was okay that he became our roommate and he wouldn’t to know how I felt about it. So I told him that I needed to share something with him that has been bothering me and he replied by stating, “I think I already know what you are about to say.” My heart dropped. I told him that I had been feeling emotionally attracted to him for awhile and that I wanted it to stop but didn’t know what to do and he said, “I have felt the same way at times and I don’t know how to make it go away.” I could tell he was beginning to feel uncomfortable. We sat in silence for awhile and then he said that he was tired and was going to lie down. We were both intoxicated at this point. So he laid down on the couch and I went inside and asked him if I could lay down next to him. Now I was the impulsive and selfish one. I just wanted him to hold me but it quickly became physical. After twenty minutes or so we stopped because I went into panic mode. The next morning we discussed how guilty we felt and that it should’ve never happened. I told him that I needed to get my head cleared and in order for me to do that I would need for him to take a break from coming out to the farm for awhile. He teared up a little and said that he considered us to be lifelong friends and that he regrets jeopardizing it.

My husband came back in town and we fought for hours. He said that he was going to move out west once he is done with school and didn’t care if I came back or not. We mutually agreed to get a divorce. It was the first time we actually talked for hours in years. I told him that I felt like I had an emotional affair with John and why I think it happened. I was too afraid that if he knew it became physical that he would go into a rage and hit me. He was very upset at first but the next day he acted like a changed man. He apologized for everything that he has put me through and told me that he wants to work on our marriage. He met with the counselor a few days later and I have an appointment tomorrow. He has left me notes on my cars, cooked me dinner and talked with me in the evenings. It has been exactly what I have needed.
I should be happy right now that he is making an effort but I’m struggling with so many different emotions and I don’t know what to do. I have so much anger built up that I’m not sure if I can take much more. How do I know that he will really change? I am also so confused about my feelings towards John. Not that anything would further between him and me but I do have feelings for him. I don’t know what is genuine anymore. I still think about him all the time and I miss him dearly. For me, investing feelings in someone is way more powerful than the physical the fact that I did that may mean I’m not in love with my husband anymore. How do you know?

To make it even more sad, my husband has tried to call John and he won’t return his calls. My husband misses him too b/c he is only friend here. I know John regrets it immensely and would take it back if he could. I had way more feelings involved that he did. He wouldn’t have done anything if I hadn’t initiated it and if he was sober. I can’t believe that I destroyed their friendship. I am an awful person and I don’t think I’ll forgive myself for it.

I dont know who I am anymore and cant believe my behavior. I feel like im drowning.

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