Felicity Huffman Says She Struggles 'Mightily' With Motherhood

That mom-of-two Felicity Huffman, time and time again, finds herself portraying a mom on-screen is something the 46-year-old actress admits she has pondered. “I thought that maybe it’s my age, or maybe it’s a little gift or joke from God: ‘That thing that you struggle with so mightily, well, I want you to do it in your professional career as well,” she tells the LA Times. “I did not enter into motherhood with any sense of equanimity or grace.”

“I’m surrounded by women who are much better mothers than I am, and they come to it much more naturally.”

Her candor about motherhood is what persuaded writer-director Daniel Barnz to cast Felicity in the role of a jaded stay-at-home mom in Phoebe in Wonderland, opening Friday. When she welcomed her first child — 8 ½-year-old Sofia Grace — Felicity says she felt her heart “break open,” and she was frightened as a result. “I felt unequal to the task,” she explains. “I felt like I was moving from mistake to mistake, sleep-deprived forever.” And while being a mom to Sofia and her little sister Georgia Grace, turning 7 next week, has brought joy to Felicity’s life, she admits she’s still not convinced that “happiness is anything like finding the perfect pair of black pants and breakfast in bed.” Many actors will bring their children on-set, but Felicity says she likes to avoid it if she can. She explains,

“I’m not good at that multi-tasking thing: kids, conversation, kids, work. I find that very difficult. Also there is sort of a rarefied air around a set, which is weird.”

If she has a message for other parents struggling to “do it all,” it is this: “Know your story, the story you have told yourself about your past…the decisions you have made.” That way, Felicity says, “at least when you are inflicting your unconscious or your views, you are a little bit aware of it.” When one of the girls recently lamented to Felicity that she feels “so different” from everyone else, Felicity told her she could relate. “I said, ‘I think it’s part of human nature that you would feel different and that you would feel like you don’t belong,'” she recalls. “You feel like you are the odd one out… It just feels like that — even if you are the center of everything.”

Sofia and Georgia are Felicity’s children with husband William H. Macy.

that is EXACTLY what it feels like with your first baby: your heart does break open and in your heart you promise this perfect chid that you will look after them, care for them…. and then they don’t latch on, or they won’t sleep and they cry in despair for hours and you feel you are just making mistake after mistake in this sleep-deprived fog.

I had almost forgotten the incredible high and the desperate lows of bringing home baby.

Michelle
on March 6th, 2009

I hear ya Hannah I hear ya!! Motherhood is hard and we don’t give credit where it is due!!

sue
on March 6th, 2009

So I am confused. She thinks that finding a perfect pair of jeans brings more happiness than her kids?? Help?!