89 thoughts on “How do you finish this sentence? (Archive Post)”

Having Cancer makes me sad to think that I have lost my mom and Grams and many friends to Breast Cancer. Having cancer also warned me to test for BRCA (I was) and do all that I could do to keep from having cancer which was prophylatic mastectomies!

Having cancer stole my innocence. I will never again be the bright and shiny 30 year old version of myself who believed her fairy tale life was just around the corner. However, this crustier 32-year-old version of me is less afraid of what people think, more willing to make decisions from my heart, and more open to seizing any adventures that come my way.

Having cancer interrupted my life, sent it spinning out of control and changed it irrevocably. It also redirected my life, enlarged it and focused it. Having cancer is living everyday with cancer’s gifts and losses.

Having cancer is not a gift. I’d never ‘give’ such a thing to anyone I loved. But like any other of life’s hurdles, we can choose how to get through it. And some of my choices have led me to wonderful things, like new friends, who are indeed a gift. Unlike other hurdles, however, it has changed my life irrevocably, in ways I’m still paying for, literally, with no end in sight.

Having cancer was a blessing in disguise. It solidified my trust in God, and showed me my strength in following my gut instincts. I became a “machine” at research, went to Mexico for treatment, made some new friendships, learned how to help heal my body using proper nutrients, & found a new career in Natural Health added to my RN license as a consultant for people looking for disease prevention. I am truly blessed…

Having cancer sucks. Forgetting cancer is hard. Surviving cancer is wonderful. But for all the black and whites, I think it’s those in between moments – the grey areas, where hope and heartache intermingle to make some kind of unique experience that only those who have ‘been there’ can appreciate – that really leaves a person forever changed. Whether it’s for the better probably depends on your perspective . . . but I am most certainly forever changed.

Catherine, you have so eloquently pin-pointed those feelings that we, as cancer survivors, have likely all experienced: “the grey areas, where hope and heartache intermingle to make some kind of unique experience that only those who have ‘been there’ can appreciate . .” –that feeling of being torn in two directions–“I’m fine. But am I really? I HAD cancer. But will it come back?” I don’t feel that I’ll ever really be liberated from that grey area, but I am learning to live happily within it.

Having cancer was the LAST thing I expected, and has changed my life hugely. Now I see everything through the cancer lens and while I appreciate and value the good things that have come into my life as a result, I still resent it and get upset and angry at what it has done to me and those close to me.

I haven’t had cancer but I do work as a nurse tutor and found this post very revealing of the wide variety of reactions and emotions surrounding a diagnosis of cancer. I am going to show it to my class as I think it will be a powerful lesson for them. Thanks for all the great work you do on JBBC – I often dip into it and always learn so much about cancer from the patient’s perspective.

Cancer decided to make me it’s home, I didn’t invite it to move in nor did I want it. There is nothing good about this disease I have not had any kind of epiphany or reawakening…. .I have also learned we are kept in the dark about treatments because I firmly believe if woman knew in advance we would be looking for alternative treatments not having to endure months and years of pain in taking certain drugs like Femara, Arimidex, Aromasins Mostly I have learned we have to be our own ADVOCATES!!

Having cancer…
took the ‘old me’ with it when it was cut from my body…
But the ‘new me’ is stronger, determined, driven and aware that life may be short… I take every opportunity… I try and experience everything (and discard the bits I don’t like without feeling guilty)… laugh, just because I can… love, because I know how important it is to feel loved… say sorry when I need to… accept apologies and compliments in equal measure… and most importantly I truly cherish the journey.

Having cancer has changed my life in every way imaginable. Some, I could do without, like the fear of recurrence, while others, like making me more empathetic and living in the here and now, are gifts that have been gratefully received.

Having cancer saved my life. Before my diagnosis I drank too much, smoked and partied too hard and was directionless in life. Cancer changed all that. I cleaned up my act – no longer drink or smoke, eat healthy, do yoga and meditation and exercise regularly. I am a happier, healthier more focussed person since my cancer diagnosis 9 years ago and loving life in a way I never did before.

Having cancer requires a shift in perception – let go of fear as much as you can – that is the advice I received when I was diagnosed with breast cancer 3 years ago and though it wasn’t always easy to do, it helped me in the end

Having cancer is an individual experience – there is no such thing as one right way to deal with it – so, as these comments show, deal with it in your own way and don’t let anyone tell you how you should or shouldn’t feel.

I think you’re right, Catherine. Cancer is a huge burden on relationships, and even though mine survived – it was the most stressful year ever and we’re still licking our wounds. Both the patient and the carer need to be supported, and it’d be great if relationship counselling was provided.

Hi Anna, I totally get where you are coming from on this, but please don’t isolate yourself. If there is a cancer support unit near you, do consider joining it. Meeting others who are going through the same thing as you lessens the feeling of isolation and fear.

Having cancer is like living in two different worlds. In one, I’m still the aunt, daughter and sister I always was, but in the other, more private world, I’m someone new, with a different perspective and a different future.

Having cancer has been a lonely experience for me as I don’t have any immediate family I can call on. Sure I have friends, but this is one of those times when you need to reach out to someone who’s bound to you by ties of marriage, blood, or partnership.

Having cancer wreaked havoc on my well ordered world. I could no longer work at the job I loved – I was known as strong, self-reliant and in control but suddenly, I was not in control. I hated being a frail, fatigued bald, old lady. Things are slowly improving but my life no longer feels like my life anymore.

Having cancer is a reminder to live each day fully; to seize the opportunity to express love and appreciation to those we care about, to take the time to stop and notice little things that can make life so enjoyable, to help others and to remember to be thankful for whatever good fortune we have.

". . .and the world cannot be discovered by a journey of miles, no matter how long, but only by a spiritual journey, a journey of one inch, very arduous and humbling and JOYFUL, by which we arrive at the ground at our own feet, and learn to be at home."
Wendell Berry