If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.

If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

These are some of the qualities I hope surround our children at school ~ kindness, consideration, security and friendliness!

Babies are amazing! They are born without culture or language, but with a built in sensitivity to faces, language and a mind that is able to absorb through sensory impressions. Montessori called this ‘the absorbent mind.’ The absorbent mind allows the baby to adapt and fit in to whatever environment surrounds the baby.

Babies are born with the capacity to make all sounds of all languages, but through repetition and feedback, the sounds of the baby’s mother tongue are strengthened, and sounds that the baby does not hear, are repeated less and soon fall out of the infant’s regular babbling. If the baby hears ‘ba, ba, ba’, or ‘ma, ma, ma’ or ‘da, da, da’, those are the sounds the baby repeats. When these sounds get a response, then the baby repeats them again. This is how the baby builds his or her ability to make the sounds of his or her mother tongue, and then is able to form words and simple sentences.

Similarly, through absorbing what goes on around him or her, the baby picks up appropriate body language and facial expressions for his or her culture. Food preferences, musical tastes, favorite activities, use of eating utensils, such as forks or chopsticks, are all picked up from the baby’s environment.

The absorbent mind is such a wonderful tool for survival and adaptation, and allows babies to learn so much and at such a rapid pace. Just think what a child learns in the first five years of life. Yet, it also comes at a price. Because babies learn, rather than rely on instinct, they are far more dependent on their parents for a longer period of time. Their environments play such a big role in their development, too. Babies and children learn what they live!

This poem says it so well!

Children Learn What They Live
By Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.
If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.
If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.
If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.
If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.
If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.
If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.
If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.
If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.
If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.
If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.
If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.
If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.
If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.
If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.
If children live with fairness, they learn justice.
If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.
If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about them.
If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

This month the teachers and I have been focusing on the development of independence in our children. In the upcoming newsletter we will soon publish, we have included examples of what independence looks like in a two year old, all the way up to our big six year olds, and how the Montessori environment supports the development of independence.

When I saw this photograph, as part of a whole sequence of photographs taken by my daughter on a recent backpacking trip, I began to think about what independence looks like in adults. I have three adult children, aged mid-twenties to early thirties, all Montessori school graduates. They are all strong independent thinkers, enjoying a good debate, whether in a class or around the kitchen table. Independence means you are not a follower.

My middle child is an avid explorer, enjoying backpacking in the wilderness, and traveling independently within the USA and abroad. She is a confident traveler, whether by foot, bike, kayak, and just recently, by sailing. Aware of her environment, respectful of the weather, animals, other people, she is confident of her skills. That’s all part of independence – respect, awareness and confidence.

Of course, just like parents of younger children, independence in our children can cause us anxiety! I worry about my child getting into difficulties on the Pacific Crest Trail, just as you worry when you see your child handling a knife, or scissors, or carrying a real glass. We don’t want our children to get hurt. But trust me, our children are capable of so much, and by giving them the gift of independence, we encourage them to live their lives to their full potential.