Sunday, 05 June 2005

New blogger Cheneille from Penang KL didn't like what I wrote about Why I Should Date Singaporean Girls, which is why she crafted a retaliation entry that not only made my balls shrink to the size of raisins, she practically chewed both of them off and made pancakes out of it.

"Look Kenny you probably haven't met many Malaysian girls then. We have a sense of humor too!! We know the difference between a sarcastic joke and a sarcastic insult too! Whaddya mean you don't have to worry as much about offending someone? We don't get offended easily okay! How dare you! Hmph I angree oledi. *aiya die die i tink hor i'm falling into his trap now leh.. i reli got no ai-dier if he was jus told a joking anot wor. so how now? tolonggg* ah hehe I was just testing you.. Of COURSE i'm not mad! Oh teehee Kenny you're like SO funny! *bimbo voice* oh did you like hear about that one about britney spears kissing madonna? that is like, ridiculously hilarious! i mean like, britney kissing like madonna? omg that is just so like tickling me!"

6. Singaporean Girls are health-conscious.

"That explains why there are more aneroxia cases in Singapore."

Ouch.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I was browsing through some magazines in a bookshop earlier today when I noticed Mr & Mr Smith was featured on a recent issue of Hype, which apparently is some Malay language teeny-bopper Smash-Hitz type magazine.

Face it lah. Some Malay-to-English translation just wouldn't sound right even if you attempted it. You think your Malay-speaking readers need all the English words to be translated in order to understand it one meh?

Another newly-invented Malay word I cannot stand is 'Gempak'.

When I first saw that word on an Astro poster, it annoyed the hell out of me because I can't for the live of me figure out what 'Gempak' is supposed to mean. I kept pronouncing it 'Gh-erm Pa-ak'. It took me half a day to realise 'Gempak' is the Malay-equivalent of the English word 'Jam Pack'. A bit ridiculous, right?

Meanwhile, here's a free movie poster I made especially for the Hype magazine editors.

aiks.. they ruin the whole title. I actually look forward to the malay translation everytime before the movie starts. damn entertaining, k! if they don't come out with it then we won't laugh.. and kenny sia won't have anything to bitch blog about..XD

ps-u should perhaps make amends by writing a 'why should i date malaysian girls' version XD

hrm, i could have sworn changing most things from english to BM must use the 'hukum dm' thing which would make eg: plug and play - main dan cucuk?
And the girl seems to be very the anger with what you said ler kenny, do something :P

suppose that girl was kinda right. you did sound like you were pretty keen on dating singaporean girls. but i've always thought that girls in sabah/sarawak are really pretty. even prettier than singaporeans. =P

Hey dude, you forgot one important thing:" In Singapore, Oral sex is illegal unless it is used as a form of foreplay." So, a road trip from Johore to Penang would be a lot more fun if you date Malaysian girl :)...plus we can bribe the highway patrol.

LOLz... the poster you did is hilarious! I certainly cannot get enough of your blogs kenny... It makes me smile and laugh... Haha...

And wow... what blogger Cheneille said is true too. For me, it's actually up to your taste right... I mean not EVERY Singaporean girl will be likeable as those you've met. And not EVERY Malaysian girl cannot meet up to those personality style that you've mentioned. And you have to bear in mind that Singapore is an island where lots of people from all over the world visit and set up their marks as compared to Malaysia where the places are limited to certain areas only. Hence of course Singapore girls have seen, experienced and are influnced by more versatile and up-to-date culture.

Singaporean and Malaysian city girls are pretty much alike ler...its just that Malaysia is a bigger country with small towns, villages as well and a bigger female population. Thus girls in Msia vary more.

hi everyone. i suppose i should say something as well. in case there are lazy blogders here as well ( i cannot believe u dont click on kenny sia's every link!), i DID write on my blog that i meant it as a joke. NOT AS REVENGE OR ANYTHING!!! sigh...... anyway kenny if ur reading this, i already replied ur comment leh... frens, can be? hard feelings, don't have?

ehem, on a lighter note, i laughed my ass off (oh sorry dont have one in d first place) reading all that cucuk dan main and kayu gembira thingys... hehehe i received an email like that once. too bad i dunno where it went. (yeah yeah some smartass is probably gonna go "see msia girls not it-savvy enough!" whatever man~~)

ps: i didnt know gempak was a translation from "jam pack" as well. my goodness...

i know another one. download is "turun muat". watever the hell THAT means...

actually, its 'muat-turun' for download. saw it on astro in malaysia. muat is obviously load, while turun is down. it does make sense in some ways but then again...

there has always been a problem in translation. it's not easy to do. and they're never accurate. an italian watching an italian-dubbed version of kill bill would definitely say it's crap. dodginess is inevitable in translation.

and i did some translation units when i was malaysia, so i kinda know how shitty it is to translate languages.

we all know nationality isn't really a criteria for dating someone. but to be practical, it's more convenient to date someone living in the same area, because long-distance relationships are hard to maintain... even a malaysian dating another malaysian but living a few states away from each other is tough. if you're sure it's worth it, then that's all well and good :)

clarise: i don't dislike u. i don't dislike anyone. except for some ppl who don't know d meaning of doin somethin just for fun and not to generate advertisements or somethin like someone sed.. i already stated clearly in my blog from d beginning i am very connected with singapore. MY WHOLE ENTRY WAS A GAG OKAY??? and to all u ppl who have a problem with me, just take a running jump at a cliff or somethin. bet ur d same ppl who critisize xiaxue for all her brilliant articles coz ur too jealous of her blogder-count.

Hey Kenny, that girl doesn't seem to take a joke....if she can't...than that's too bad to be a blog...she can't cus she can't take jokes from Kennysia.com. Too bad...i should name her "The Revenge of The Malaysian Little Gal" Episode 2...cus XiaXue is Episode one...good ides?

Hey Cheneille, you stink! as in very funny. You would be great in stand-up, and with some acting in addition to words/scripts, you could get stinkier. Think.. the good old Robin Williams and the most recent Lewis Black.

But I think you may have further solidified the big-ballsâ€™ views. Here is why: You were up till three in the morning on Saturday, you canâ€™t be out partying (5 is out), and instead blogging and that is not exactly blow-xyz (3 is out). At this hour, you have to be in pajamas, so not exactly fashion material (1 is out) and is bad for your health too for not getting to bed early (6 is out.). This particular entry is more like ranting, technically is an emotional dumping and requiring no opinion at all (4 is out). And since you are still staying with your parents, you canâ€™t possibly claim financial independence (7 is out). You certainly earned every aspect of 2.

Go and kick some ass!

(Sorry Kenny for trespassing as Cheneille's site requires the retarded login pain-in-the-you-know-where.)

To: that dumb girl
It just pisses me to no end to see stupid people who automatically assumes that you condemn the opposite party, when you make a comment that praises (be it a joke or not) a party.

Look, just because Kenny praises Singaporean girls to hype out the whole "zomg xiaxue wanna marry me!" thing, doesn't mean that he thinks badly of Malaysian girls. Likewise, just because I despise some of the fundamentalist Christians' actions on killing abortion doctors and burning down their clinic, doesn't automatically make me a person who's against anything that has to do with Christianity. Stop assuming things.

It just doesn't make any sense at all. If everyone were to act like you, the whole world would've been beriddled with hatred and war, mainly due to reasons like Christians bombing the hell out of Muslims, for not believing in Jesus (hey, that Muslim guy praises Allah! So he MUST be condemning Christianity!), or the vice versa. Or hell, Americans would've bombed the whole world for that reason too (ZOMG That person doesn't sing the American national anthem! He MUST be a terrorist who have absolutely no love for America!)

And yes, I didn't bother to post this down her site, due to it being hosted on the shitty friendster site, that requires everyone to register, login, before posting.

At least we have a more comprehensive grasp of english and a better fashion sense than m'sian girls. Seriously some of them look so SCARY.. no wonder there are less cases of anorexia - because they are obviously deluded in the first place.

Not that I'm condoning eating disorders, nor do i have anything against Malaysians (well, not really). I'm just looking for trouble, as usual.

I tell you, having a FUGLY brat talking about us (S'porean girls) like this. Pissed me off so damn much man. Kenny, Kenny... Why is she like this? Sounds like she hates us alot, no? I can't stand her. Puiiiiiii.

Kenny replies: She doesn't hate you. Its all done in good humour lah. Please read the entire entry carefully.

if you cant speak mly. just accept the fact. are you racist or are you racist? im a chinese by the way. and for your info, tuan and puan means mr and mrs. and smith is the name for goodness sake. what? do you expect the names to be changed? sheesh.

dude, i'm malay and came across the word 'gempak' like over 10 years ago. Despite passing it hundreds of time at Queensway Shopping Centre, ultimately an Indian classmate of mine made me realise it was meant to be Jam Pack. I must have been left out of the memo to the rest of the Malay population..

Phewwwww!!!!!!wow kenny keep up the good work ,soon we will be sending scud missile to singapore and vise-versa,hmmm!!!at least all the comment's here make me lough and kill some extra time i have,the best word i have learn today is kayu gembira,kenny can i borrow your kayu gembira,lol!!!!

Phewwwww!!!!!!wow kenny keep up the good work ,soon we will be sending scud missile to singapore and vise-versa,hmmm!!!at least all the comment's here make me lough and kill some extra time i have,the best word i have learn today is kayu gembira,kenny can i borrow your kayu gembira,lol!!!!

All these talk about Singapore girls sets me into a deep mode of thoughts....about 20 years ago...Singapore girls is no different than any other ladies in the region....but as society progress...things starts to compromise....you can find most denizens in most develope or going to be deveope countries a wee bit cocky....maybe the price that we are all paying for what we call sophistication and modernisation....to a point that relationship anf friendship becomes so complex..

sad its true

life will only get lonelier...to a point that you will have so much to spend but so little friends to spend and enjoy life with....sad but true

its nothing to do with gender....its just the evolution of a mindset from simplicity to complexity....its just not Singapore that is experiencing it.....ask the New Yorkers if you doubt what I say ....

I believe 'gempak' is a commonly used colloquial malay term. Terms like 'malu-ation' (for embarassment) and 'agar-ation' (for estimation) does no more justice, if not less, to the english and malay language. Ignorance or taking the piss? You tell me.

what the hell are U thinking!?...well im not really malay coz my dad is an american (texas)...while my mom is a malay girl....i think malay are the best...they are gentle...smart...sweet...well what else hah..yah whatever..but still malay = malaynium :p haha!!

you are funny, the way you pronounce Gempak, talking bout this, my ex, he is a Singaporean and the thing is he cant pronounce properly the malay word tentera (eng-soldier). He would pronounce it as "dendera" and i would laugh and giggle non stop.

Hey, Yeah I agree. Malay words are just ridiculous. Especially that Jampack or Gempak. Lol. Why can't they be original and have their own way of saying stuffs instead of copying blindly from the English words? Or no, not copying. Translating. Tuan dan Puan Smith. Mr. and Mrs Smith..Hard disk..disk keras.. LOL

we have to admit that all this funny malay/english translations in the cinema have been going on for a long-long time. Even our national cartoonist 'LAT' has made fun of it in his comic book a long time ago. So stop making fun of it as if it is something new. It was bad then and it is even worse now. As LAT mentioned in his cartoon, the soldier said "fire" and the translation was written as "api". How about this
Komputer ini mengandungi barang keras, barang lembut yang original.dilengkapi perkakasan cucuk dan main. How about the chinese / malay translation in the tele, most of the time it should had been kita instead of kami. I remembered someone complained in the newspaper, the hero said " I am worn and torn " and the subtitle was written as " saya satu dan sepuluh " Anyway I enjoyed reading all the comments: cheers

dear first i want girl malaysian very butyfull 18 years old becuse i am somali moslim my name anwar and i am 24 years old i am workin in doha from qatar my mobell is 09745328705 i love girl malaysian duble ok take care.

ahahahhahaha.. bout those translations jokes... my... haha... my heart almost stop beating due to excessive dose of laughter. hm, u know what, those translation probs-turn-out-to-be-jokes happened due to the translators' prob themselves. i guess they're a bunch of people who didn't noe a good command in both language -english n malay-