All Hail The Hero's Return: The 'Rambo' Trailer Goes Live

Back in May, the internet-leaking gods gifted us with some hyperviolent footage from a project then-titled John Rambo, starring sexagenarian superstar Sylvester Stallone, eager to prove that after a nip/tuck here and a human growth hormone injection there, he was more than up to the task of hunting down yet another yellow-skinned army through a reptile-infested jungle using nothing more than his trusted bowie knife, a pocket flamethrower, and his bare hands.

The trailer for that movie, now streamlined to the far less unwieldy Rambo, will precede screenings of Saw IV. But for those who wish not to subject themselves to yet another 90-minutes of Rube Goldbergesque killing contraptions, we feature it for you here, completely free of charge, save for the part of your cherished childhood that will evaporate watching a hero of your past embark on a desperate hunt for former action-movie glory. That said, those machine guns and cobras do kind of look wicked-cool.