Roger Federer Hates Maria Sharapova's New Norwegian Pet Skunk

Hamburg, Germany - The Clay court event in Hamburg was turned topsy turvey yesterday when officials discovered an odd rodent on the loose in the men's locker room. Not only did it look strange, but it apparently smelled pretty... "Awful!" Scowled Roger Federer, "I can't believe that thing belongs to Maria!" She's just getting back at me for stepping on her damn pussy back in Australia!"

Roger was in the locker room when the pint sized rodent turned tail to attack him and his clothing bag. Rafael Nadal was a witness, "Absolutely amazing," smirked Rafa, "How can something so tiny smell so bad?! And how can something smell so bad and be somebodies pet? Maria must be very lonely to put up with that!"

"It was given to me at a Paul McCartney Concert," said Maria, "I was told it was just a hamster. I've never heard of a Norwegian skunk before!"

Hamburg officials had to temporarily close down the men's locker room and capture the rodent in a baited cage trap. "It turned up its nose at everything but the finest caviar in our players lounge," said a member of the grounds crew, "Then the blasted thing bit off the end of my finger!" The Women's Tour officials are considering fining Sharapova for the disruption in the tournament.

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