Pages

December 11, 2010

6 Toddler-Related Items that Get Under My Skin – or - If You’re Grumpy and You Know it Stomp Your Feet

Did you ever want to just stand up and shout, I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take it anymore? Well, beware: That’s what I’m going to do today. I have a horrible cold, and I had to cancel my holiday party. Here’s what I’m sick and tired of:

1. Our country’s fear of whole milk and whole milk products.We've become so obsessed with obesity that you just cannot find whole milk products in every supermarket. I’m specifically referring to full fat yogurt, and even more specifically, full fat Greek yogurt. Have you ever tried graham crackers dipped in Faje Total Greek yogurt? Sinfully delicious and my tiny daughter’s favorite snack. I think it’s nuts that doctors tell moms and dads to switch to 2% milk when a child turns two, and parents abide without questioning why. I know childhood obesity is a problem, but we target the wrong culprits. Obesity begins with a lack of adult supervision, not a glass of whole milk.

2. Advertisers trying to pass off large lower case letters as capitals or mixing in lower case and capitals willy-nilly. Cricket loves to spell every word she sees and then guess what the word is. But how can she do this when all of her alphabet games and such are all in all caps and then she sees lower case mixed in with a word that is seemingly going to be in all capital letters? Oh the humanity!

3. The phrase gone viral. This has nothing to do with toddlers, I know. I'm just sick of this phrase that has gone viral.

4. Moms who wear make-up to 9 a.m. playgroups.

5. Cold coffee

6. Doctors eager to hand out diagnoses before a thorough assessment. Okay, so here’s the real thing I wanted to get to today. Cricket wasn’t speaking much when she was 20 months old, and after meeting with a highfalutin speech language pathologist for only two sessions, she diagnosed her as having Childhood Apraxia of Speech (CAS). She told us that Cricket was going to have a “long tough road ahead of her.” Well - after I spent 2 weeks in sheer terror that something was wrong with my baby - my family convinced me to just drop this doctor and go back to Early Intervention (EI). And yesterday, after only 7 months of EI and speech therapy, Cricket scored above her age in expressive language. She’s such an amazing kid. Did I ever tell you that she repeatedly pulled out her gavages (feeding) tube as a newborn?

I’m so tempted to post a YouTube video of Cricket singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and then send the link to the diagnosis-happy speech therapist. Instead, I’ll just eat some graham crackers and yogurt and start composing a blog about the million things for which I am grateful. Including Alka-Seltzer Cold Plus. It rocks.

If you stood up right now and shouted I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take it anymore what would you be griping about?