TEXAS CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY

Break.com Staff

Hi I'm Mike McAlister and this is Newsfeed. The Police have arrested 4 players from the Texas Christian University after catching them selling the dangerous street drug, Marijuana. Or as it's known in California, smokable Tylenol. One of the jailed athletes is D.J. Yendrey. Last year he posted impressive numbers; 39 tackles and 3 sacks…. of weed. Or as it's known in California: Sleepytime tea. When Linebacker Tanner Brock was asked about failing a pending drug test, he remarked, "it wouldn't be a problem because there would be about 60 people screwed." Clearly Brock is familiar with the Spartacus defense. "I smoke pot!" "No, I smoke pot!" I'm Sparticus! I mean, I smoke pot. That's what we're doing right?" With 4 top TCU players arrested the big question is- who will they buy weed from now? I'm Mike McAlister and this is a special effect.