The Fear Monger's Five Favorite Horror Movies Of 2013

Like the bulk of entertainment media, our esteemed crew of movie fanatics here at Cinema Blend annually offers up their favorite Top Ten Films of the Year. As a horror fan, I am always on the lookout for likeminded critics who recognize the genre flicks that have transcended the label to become a cinematic treasure. As you can imagine, it isn’t the most common occurrence. As such, I present to you now, in alphabetical order, the Fear Monger Five Favorite Horrors of 2013. Cue up a really, really slowed-down version of Bing Crosby’s "White Christmas."

Frankenstein’s Army

I’ve rarely experienced a film that felt just as exciting watching it at home as it would have inside a theater, but Richard Raaphorst’s exceedingly insane Frankenstein’s Army definitely delivered that experience. I attribute that to way the film uses its found-footage approach, putting viewers in a balls-to-the-wall, hands-free video game experience. Only with practical effects replacing the CGI for the maddeningly surreal gallery of monsters that Raaphorst designed.

No one will argue the complexity of this narrative. Near the end of World War II, Russian soldiers are on German grounds, trying to track down a random distress signal they receive. (Yes, they’re recording only for prosperity, and yes, these Russian soldiers speak English. Get over it.) They arrive at what looks like an empty building and soon discover that it’s a secret Nazi lab being run by Viktor Frankenstein (Karl Roden), a descendent of Mary Shelley’s scientist, who has used the Creature recipe to concoct the titular army of half-metal/half-zombie antagonists that never fail to impress anytime they’re on the screen. And the nonsensical FPV allows for some of the most giddily frightening monster shots in modern horror. This is midnight movie material of the highest order.