Thursday, 4 June 2009

Recruitment Hell

Believe it or not my last job was at a recruitment company. After about a day of work I actually started to think that all of our consultants were on some powerful drugs. They were so nice, upbeat and friendly. This is how you have to be in New Zealand.

Fast forward to France and it was a shock to start dealing with them here. Out of the gate we found them very cagey and quite negative. The first question was always "Are you looking together?"

"Well of course we are. We are a two piece Voltron. We came to see you together didn't we?"

Luckily most of companies started to warm to us. We have learned some good things, made some good friends and even managed to have a laugh.

I do have to retell the story of one particularly crappy recruitment agent from a company called YCO.

First think of a blonde English lady with a slightly up turned nose. Then add an ever so slightly posh accent and a ridiculous surname.

This snob and I do not use the word snob lightly actually said the following to us.

"You need more water sports on your CV"

"I spent two years in Auckland and everyone I knew had a Yacht and was out on the water every weekend"

"Surely your family has a Yacht"

Naturally I was at pains to tell the many hours I have spent fishing and of my own private yacht a six foot dinghy. My wife did not mince words. She said the only people in Auckland yachting every weekend were the incredibly wealthy and if we were incredibly wealthy we would not be here.

This dialogue ended with us being blacklisted. No one has bothered to respond to our emails informing them of our increased experience gained and how bloody hard we have been working to find work.

Today I will email them to tell them we will no require their tireless services.

I guarantee I get a response in five minutes asking for the name of the Yacht. This is a lead for them you see.