Bikini-clad vinyl nerdery, rap music, and assorted tomboyisms.

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Come from the city where the glitter don’t glimmer.

I turn my back for 5 minutes, and what happens? The Saints are sorrrrta killing it right now.

Here’s my list of reasons why this rules:

– A dude named Sedrick. Defensive Tackle. Sedrick with an “S.” Freaking dope.

– The black and gold color scheme, so crisp and pleasing to the eye.

– The Saints aren’t perfect and this makes me like them more. Specifically, the team gives me a compelling reason to hate it in that Drew Brees looks like a fair-haired Trent Reznor circa oh-nine, and that’s not a good thing, you see, because Trent Reznor circa oh-nine is tired and bloated, both physically and verbally. Stop it, Trent. Ew. Anyway, if I ever meet you at a bar, please be aware that I will bring this up at some point in conversation, probably with a lot of excitement and hand gestures. Just nod and agree with me, please.

– The fleur-de-lys logo! Classic, royal, and super dope, always…just ask Weezy’s face and my black onesie that I never wear because it exposes me to a degree that makes me uncomfortable.

(I’m not dope enough to have haters, but if I were, and if I did, they’d call me out for posting a picture like this.

Also: Sorry, Mom. Sorrysorry.)

– Their god-awful defense, which makes me feel all smug since annoying football analysts always insist that the best offense is a good defense. Um, NO, and the Saints’ 9-0 record proves it. You know what the best offense really is? SCORING POINTS. So shut yer trap, Cris Collinsworth.

I can’t think of any other reasons but oh, who cares. New Orleans has been so sad for so long, and now there’s some greatness there (except for that awful Bobby Jindal). Let’s celebrate that. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must go and laissez les bon temps roulez and post some pretty songs.

The Meters – “Handclapping Song.” Um, ’cause it’s a post about New Orleans. And ’cause I can’t think of any Mannie Fresh-related songs that you haven’t already heard nine thousand times. And ’cause of this*. And ’cause if you wanted to hear “Born on the Bayou” you’d turn on the classic rock station right about now. Side note: “Born on the Bayou” is a certified banger and I love it so, so much.