one giant leap for personkind

4. i will also ban the word “men,” replacing it with the word “people.” In fact, wherever the letters “m,” “e,” and “n” appear consecutively, they will be replaced with the word “people.” This could prove to be a real people-ace. Some examples follow:

some think al franken is suffering from male people-opause.

i really think liberalism, like socialism, is a people-tal illness.

kiche is always a homosexual’s favorite item on the people-u. the porterhouse steak is always hers least favorite.

i’ve really been trying to people-d my differences with illegal aliens but, unfortunately, none of them speak good english.

“people at work” was clearly among the worst bands of the 1980s. “a flock of seagulls” gets honorable people-tion.

now, some – who are not in n.o.w. - will say my new feminist word-banning scheme is a bunch of person-ure. but i think it’s nothing short of hers-terical. and i really hope i’m not sounding people-dacious to my readers.

author’s note: for those who are not particularly swift, dr. adams is not really going to imple-people-t this scheme. but the story of the feminist banning the word “mankind” is, unfortunately, true.