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August 13, 2008

GH: The Day in Pictures

Due to a power outage last Friday, my DVR didn't record General
Hospital. And to give you an idea of how motivated I was to catch up
on this "soap opera," I didn't discover that it hadn't recorded until Monday, long after the SOAPNet catch-up-on-all-the-crap weekly
marathon had already run. Obviously, I cried my eyes out and cursed the unfairness of the universe. But then I had a lime popsicle and felt much better. So then I was in such a good mood that I decided not to spoil it by, say, blogging about the GH I have managed to watch lately. And then Mallory was all hilarious and caught everybody up on the abject horribleness of the show, so I was additionally unmotivated to blog about it because why disturb the rage-tinged funny, you know?

Now, you're reading this and probably thinking something outrageous must have happened to draw me out of my blogging semi-hiatus, to warrant two GH posts in as many days from your beleaguered Serial Drama girls. And . . . you are right. Witness the something outrageous:

I know I should have realized it when he named his firstborn after a legume, but now it's clear: Ingo Rademacher has lost his mind and/or has access to really, really good pot. Who goes on television with that hair, and seems so happy about it? That hair is ruining Australian hotness, and that is unacceptable! Mel Gibson's personality and post-1998 appearance does enough in that department. There is only so much heavy hotness-lifting that their men's Olympic swimming team can do to compensate for one of their countrymen falling down on the job like this.

But maybe I'm being too harsh. Liz, what do you think?

Yeah, "bitch, please [cut that mess]" was sort of what I had in mind as well.

Let's check in with Spinelli about his take on this critically important issue. His hair-styling standards are obviously low. Verdict?

The Jackal keeps it real, y'all.*

Kate, all your recent sartorial choices to the contrary, you are
an allegedly super-stylish woman. Plus, you have kind of a thing for
Jax. So, what do you think about Carly's current victim's coif?

I know, right?

Elizabeth, just to check back in briefly, should Jax do something about his hair?

Translation: "Der!" (If my chosen career does not work out, I plan to explore one as a bitchiness interpreter.)

On a brighter note, Rebecca Hearst's hair is returning to its former glory after some truly scary times.
But that tiny non-plot-related development is probably one of the three
best things to happen on this show in at least a month. That is no
exaggeration and I challenge anyone who thinks differently to a duel.

* I am disturbed by how hot I think Jason has been looking lately. Someone
please tell me there is a perfectly logical reason for this, preferably
one that doesn't involve me losing IQ points and becoming one of those
"OMG, he is SO HOT when he points that gun!1!!1!!!" crazies. Thank you
in advance.Screencaps courtesy of Laurie Luvs Liason.

Comments

Becca, I am worried that your broken brain syndrome has finally taken over. It's fine to think Jason is handsome or even sexy when his hair isn't all Farah Fawcett or dippity doo'd. But if you go to the ugly insane place of saying"OMG, he is so HOT when he points that gun!!!!!!" you will be committed. Saying it even once will land you in a room next to Laura's. Do you want to spend your most productive years as a wig on a broom on a rocking chair?

SO BE CAREFUL! Check out old clips and screencaps of him on that boat during the B&W Ball if you find yourself slipping. No shame in asking for help.

And if Guza is so set on spending money on CGI, why not use it where it is needed most....HAIR AND WARDROBE. We would never be faced with Jax's new hideousness or Liz's blondeness or Kate's old lady sparkle fest ensembles. Think of all the good CGI could have done for Robin's often mistreated locks or Patrick's skinny ties. A few clicks and voila! Everyone is well dressed and groomed.

Hell, with bridge and car dangling CGI fees even Spinelli could look like Brad Pitt!

Jason (with a proper haircut) has always been hot. He's physically attractive if you go for piercing blue eyes and bulgy muscles. You're not crazy.

However, the main reason you're able to see it now is because Jason is treating Sonny like the little bitch he's always been. Their breakup has shown Jason that Sonny is as selfish and self=absorbed as Carly, who he also kind of treats like shit on a regular basis.

Now if Jason would only get out of "the business", sweep Liz off her feet, and start sparring with the Q's, he might actually become a decent character.

Hello, summer? Black t-shirts & jeans to the contrary it is in fact summer and thus Steve Burton's hotness is out in full force after its winter hibernation. Perfect timing for a shirtless scene sighting - watch carefully as those are a rare event, only briefly spotted once every couple of years.
I have always cracked up about his theory of bulking up in the winter on football snacks, etc. and then working out and slimming down in the summer to lose the "winter coat." lol

Jason Morgan morality issues aside that Steve Burton is a riot. And a hot riot at that.

Glad to see Cody back on the scene. Perfect choice as a "Jason" for Jason. Gorgeous guy, decent acting skills. Why has he languished in story purgatory? Oops - he's a vet so I guess it's only a matter of time until he has a storyline in which he's a psycho killer. As opposed to the "normal" for hire killer deemed perfectly acceptable by TPTB.

Why can't we just have a whole show about Maxie and all her fabulousness?

First she was all compassionate and funny with Robin about the ultrasound. Discussing fears, Georgie, and Mac even, it was heaven.

Then she gave St. Jasus a smackdown for not taking good enough care of special Spinelli! That was priceless.

Then she spun around and briefly hollared at Liz, a woman whose husband she had a drugged up affair with, to give her more news on poor Spinelli!

Then even more Maxie goodness when she yet again dissed and dismissed a snarky Dr. Hunter entirely to hug her sick little friend.

She is such a riot. For all her self destructive dangerous behavior and crazy antics and her insecurities and faults she is also incredibly loyal, funny, and loving. She is fantastic and well layered as a character, and when I see Guza trying to make her another Carly like he did Lulu I get really pissed. I hope KS fights it and acts it all out differently so we know she is not a Carly wannabe in anyway.

As a huge Elizabeth fan, I'll take her anyway I can get her. But, please, can we find SOMETHING for her to do? Anything? Elizabeth shows up for five minutes a show to do what? Roll Spinelli to an examination room? Bug Nikolas and Sam about making Lucky happy? Does she not have anything else to do? Seriously. She was sooo prominent in storylines a year ago. WTF happened?

Liz's hair was certainly MY highlight of the week. Seriously, all I could remember concerning the last several days of GH was my happiness at that frosted look being gone. And Jason IS looking superhot, partly because he has had an unsightly growth removed (ie Sonny.)

Some truly hilarious screencaps, ladies. Clearly, a picture truly is worth a thousand words. Glad to see Liz's hair getting darker and not streaked like a skunk. And Jason Morgan/Steve Burton has always been, dare I say it, brutally hot...except when his hair was almost as long as mine. But when it's short, he certainly is one fine-looking individual.

you are not crazt steve burton has been and will always be hotness. i just cant stand jason and yes it's to the point that i forget about his looks. does anyone else think that in that first screen cap pf rebecca herbst she looks a little like laura leighton aka sydney andrews from melrose place?

OMG! You made me laught at something about this truly, almost universally (minus Scrubs and SpinMax) sucky show! Those screencaps made me nearly pee my pants laughing!

About Jason. I haven't found him particularly appealing since... well, ever, but he totally rocks his scenes with Claudia, he's really sweet and protective with Spinelli, and he has told off both Sonny and Carly numerous times in the last couple months. That, and his expression always gives me the impression that he is laughing to himself about how completely assinine 95% of the storylines are right now. Add it all up and it equals MEGA-HOTNESS!!! Gun or no gun!

Can the hair stylists at the very least, wash Spinelli's hair?? Over half the time his hair looks so gross to me. The scenes where Jax was teaching him how to be a refined gentleman, where his hair was all awesome and slicked back.... I was like PLEASE please.... do not go back to the silly hair.