My best friend and I are in a relatively big fight; I had a hysterectomy 3 years ago; @44yrs. old; and my doc INSISTED ON NO PENETRATION OF ANY KIND for 6 weeks. My girlfriend had one for fibroid tumors and ovarian cysts about around Feb. Originally she had sex (gentle she claims) after 2 weeks; then after her doctor told her it was a go without examining her and she ended up in the emergency room for a tear and a hole...; then she was told another 6 weeks, with in 3 weeks she did it with someone kind of biggish; and again; emergency room, this time they kept her 6 days, she had infection everywhere inside and they did surgery through the abdominum and thru the vagina. I have given all my time, taking her here and there, visiting her in hospital and picking her up and taking her to her post care visit, and my car is like 25 years old... and then she told me Friday - which again was 2 weeks out of the big surgery, she did it again and I took issue in a big way with her and now she is mad at me. Am I being mean, nasty or putting her down because I told her I have had it she is on her own now. I worry about her and care a lot about her but why should I take the time and money and my beat up car to do all this when she doesn't even respect her own body enough, and do what the doctors say, to take care of herself, and I end up taking care of all the loose ends? Someone tell me I am not being a judgemental "word meaning female dog", but someone that cares and doesn't want her to die? Plus is there any related things where premature penetration caused extreme, nearly deadly consequences? If I had some more information on this topic I could give it to her, merely passing on the hyperlink instead of emotions involved. Thank you very much as this is upsetting me, I don't know if she has a death wish or she just doesn't understand how seriuosely close to death she was, and she has a little boy and a grown one and a lot of people that love her a lot.

Your friend seems to have this "sexual urge" that is uncontrolable...She really is playing with fire with a vaginal surgery...Her cervix could be too open and she could have some real bad problems.....I was told to wait for 6 weeks...I had the full abdominal surgery plus vaginal reconstruction with my cervix and ovaries taken out...No, you are not being judgemental....You are being a very good and well meaning friend...Honey, if there were more around like you, this would be one better place.....

If I could, I would send her your letter....Thanks for caring...I send you my best wishes...