I currently have a 15 month old dd and am expecting a newbie in 2 weeks . However i'm really stressed about maternity leave and the lack of a paycheck.

Also, i may have to switch to part time instead of full time to watch our kids more as my salary would just cover childcare for 2. Right now my mom and MIL watch my daughter, but with 2, my mom will no longer be able to watch our kids (she already watches my nephew as well, so 3 is too many) and so i don't want to have my MIL watch 2 kids 5 days a week-i just don't feel that is right. So DH and i have thought about me working part time and his mom will watch the 2 babes 2 days a week.

I'm just really getting stressed about not contributing to our family financially...especially with the added cost of another child. I tried for the past few months to get a higher paying job and went on several interviews, but nothing seemed to work out. i'm going to start applying for new positions once i'm on maternity leave in hopes of finding a higher paying job that i could still afford child care and have money left over. It's just very stressful.

DH and i went through some very hard times together where we couldn't even afford groceries. he recently got a new much better job, but i never ever want to know that life again nor do i want my kids to know that life.

i just don't know what to do. i want to continue to contribute and i just don't feel like part time is going to be enough considering how little i make to begin with! i just don't know what to do...

__________________Nicci...PT WOHM, CDing, bottle feeding, non-cosleeping, vax-ing mama to A 5/7/11 and M 9/9/12 , expecting a newbie 3/22/14! married to the most incredible man and my bff J 6/11/10