Politics

In a speech this week to the Organization of American States, Vice President Mike Pence issued the standard, obligatory denunciation of the communist regime in Cuba, which the U.S. national-security establishment (i.e., the Pentagon, the CIA, and the NSA) have targeted for regime change ever since the Cuban revolution in 1959. Pence stated:

Two weeks ago, while attending the opening ceremony of a conference in Vienna commemorating the 25thanniversary of the Vienna Declaration of Human Rights, I was struck by the simple words and sad demeanor of Nadia Murad, a Yazidi survivor of ISIS captivity featuring sexual slavery and institutionalized rape.

Many readers have protested this column’s tiresome history of taking cheap shots at the expense of our 45th President. So today we reverse that distressing trend and endeavor to travel the high road with an in- depth analysis of one of the most critical problems confronting the nation today. His hair.

Today, Memorial Day, Americans across the land will hear the same message: that U.S. soldiers who have died in America’s foreign wars and foreign interventions have done so in the defense of our rights and freedoms. It is a message that will be heard in sporting events, memorial services, airports, churches, and everywhere else that Memorial Day is being commemorated.

We now offer up a few choice words concerning the Continuing Investigation Being Conducted by Special Counsel Robert Mueller, and those words are: Happy Birthday baby! You are now one whole year old. Who’s the big boy? Why, you are. You’re the big boy. Yes, you are.