Life Empowered Moments

None of us are different. Sure, we look different, we have different cultures and styles, we may even use a different language to communicate, but none of us are really different. Any reasonable rational human being really wants the same things as any other. To live a peaceful life with success as defined by the individual, love, safety, and to say it differently, we really just want Maslow's hierarchy of needs met. If every human being regardless of race, creed, color, gender, orientation, or otherwise had all of these needs met, the world would be in a much different state. Or would it?

I have my own personal theory called the long hair, short hair theory in which people tend to want what they don't have. For example, if you have chicken for dinner, you are dissatisfied because you wanted steak. According to Maslow, your basic need of nourishment is met, but according to long hair short hair syndrome, you will not be happy, because you are craving what you don't have.

It's important that we have the self-awareness to recognize and be sure not to mistake not having our needs met from having what we want. In addition, if we are yearning for something else, we should be sure to follow the path that will not call your character into question nor your integrity.

What is the life empowered moment for today? Simply, leverage your self- awareness to be a better you and understand the difference between your needs being met and your wants being satisfied.

As a leader, it is important that I am the first partaker of any instruction and insight that I share with others. Most recently, I have had the opportunity to share that we are in a unique position with space and opportunity to pursue our dreams and goals. I believe that to my core.

However, here I was the next day sitting, trying to put some structure around what I am hoping to do and accomplish and found myself overwhelmed, discouraged and simply as a loss. I just didn't know what the next steps were, I could not think clearly as to what to do next.

So to give myself a break, I went to a few other tasks on my list of daily goals. When I returned, although I didn't have the clear answers, I did have clarity enough to know that just because it gets tough, doesn't mean, it isn't worth pursuing.

In addition to that, I was able to reflect on what I had shared with others regarding the opportunities that are now before me. I couldn't get frustrated, but instead get motivated.

I am motivated, I am encouraged, and I am more focused than ever to achieve and pursue the purpose that is inside of me.

So what is your life empowered moment for today… here it is, realities of life can discourage you but you have to take courage and remember that you have the space and opportunity. Now go for it! Take advantage of your space and opportunity.

I am a true believer that as beneficial as social media can be it can also be a huge time consumer. I am a bit ashamed to say that it is easy for me to jump on to FB for just a moment to see what's going on, only to find myself still wondering around the hall of people's lives 45 minutes later.

This is time that I will never get back… so I often internally chastise myself. However, I will also say that the value of social media can also be immeasurable for a couple of reasons… 1) Being exposed to other things can spark creativity in you. 2) It can also motivate you to do the things that you desire to do.

I am sharing all of this because in December I joined the Act Like a Success FB page and just a few minutes on the site literally inspired me to actively and purposely pursue my goals. So what I realized and what I want to remind you of is this… Get around people that are movers and shakers like you. Whether that be over coffee, over social media, over lunch, expose yourself to those that are in pursuit, not those that are just coasting, as they will merely weigh you down.

So to restate the life empowered moment for today… Get in pursuit of your dreams and get around people that are in pursuit of theirs.

In my honesty and truth, I may be a bit naïve because I have never been through divorce. From the outside looking in at someone else's situation, my only commentary typically is that you have to do what's best for you. But I pretty much stand by that in any situation, divorce, job change, etc.

However, I also believe that relationships can work if there is willingness to work at it from all parties involved. Here is where I get a bit tangled up. How long do you work at it? How long do you go through the same situations over and over again? Are their types of situations that you bi-pass and then others that are deal breakers? How are those determined? What about the impact to the others around? How does the reconciliation or dissolution impact them?

It's funny, that I ask and even as I list these questions and concerns, the truth is, it doesn't really matter to the person on the outside looking in. It's the person on the inside looking out that has to make these decisions regardless of the impact. While I used divorce as the base for the topic, this can be applied to any scenario, to a job change, a relocation, a divorce, even a marriage, whatever the situation is, it will always be the person inside looking out that will have to deal with the decisions most.

So why am I writing all of this, I am sharing this to get to two points… 1) As the person on the outside looking in, you have a perspective, and whatever the other person decides to do, respect it. 2) As the person on the inside looking out, you have a perspective as well, and whatever you decide to do, make sure you do it with all of the best information possible to help you make the decision, after all, you are the one that will have to live with your decision.

So what is the life empowered moment today… Big decisions require careful consideration. Consider carefully and then make the best decision that you can for you. And know that you can LIVE with the decision that you make.

I must admit, although, I have had some difficult times in my life, overall, I have had a really good life. God has been good to me and my good days truly outweigh my bad days. With all of the ups and downs of life, I have learned that I must trust God, trust the purpose for my life, and trust me. When there is no one around to speak life to me, I must speak it to myself. When there is nothing profitable coming out of my efforts, I must see beyond my efforts. When things simply seem bleak, I must trust the purpose of my life. I must rely on the fact that my purpose is what pushes me to meet every goal that I set for myself. My purpose is what gets me up every morning to try it again. My purpose is what propels me to keep going when it seems as though everything else has stopped. It is my purpose.

What is the life empowered moment for today? Daily, allow your purpose to shine and trust it. You will not be disappointed.

In life, we have both good and bad experiences.Our experiences often shape who we are, what we think, and how we feel.This shaping can be so impactful that marriages fail because of baggage of prior relationships, people lose jobs because of behaviors at previous companies, and communication is broken today because of the inability to effectively communicate in the past.So yes, experiences are impactful. Today, I want to challenge you to look at your experiences as just that, however do not allow them to skew your entire perception of a person, a place, or even an event.For example, if one had a bad experience with a women, then in his mind all women are no good.Or if you had a bad experience at a restaurant, then you refuse to go to any of them. Or if you had an argument with your mom ten years ago, you still refuse to have any interaction with her and the entire family. I am not saying that issues are real, but I am saying learn how to deal with them and move on.Live and enjoy life in spite of the past, do not operate in fear and restriction because of it. So what is the life empowered moment for today, allow your experiences to be just that, learn from them, but don't allow them to keep you from realizing the best life that you can full of love, joy and happiness.

My dad was 50 years old when he passed away. I was expecting my second child when I found out that he was ill. My mom kept prompting me to come by but being so busy with life, I kept putting it off. What's worse is that they lived about 10 minutes from me, but I just didn't seem to have the "time". When I finally saw him, he was a shell. He had lost about 100 pounds, wasn't eating much, and no longer able to work... he was just there. Soon after, I quit my job and went to see him daily. I did whatever I could to help, including cook, clean, and sometimes just kept him company. Once I realized that my time was limited with him, I wanted to spend all that I could with him. Not even three months later he had passed away.

Why am I sharing this with you? Because as I am getting older, my priorities are shifting and my experience with him is a primary motivation. Those last three months of his life taught me the following life empowered activities:

Identify what's most important in life and reverence it like so.

Learn all you can from others, whether it's what to do or what not to do.

Don't take time for granted - once you use it up, it’s all gone.

Enjoy the journey as much as you enjoy the destination. Sometimes it takes much longer to get "there" than you planned. And only God knows how long you’re going to stay "there" so find the joy in your pursuit.

​As people evolve, develop and become more independent in life, we sometimes come with the mentality that we don't need anyone else. We begin to say to ourselves that "I can do this all by myself". I am also sure that you have heard the old adage, "I can do bad all by myself".

And guess what, you are right. You can do it by yourself. Kids can be raised successfully by single parents, Companies can be started by entrepreneurs, and neither men nor women need significant others to be happy.

But the question is, is that really true? Who on this earth have made it without ANY help? Who has raised children without NO support system? Who has climbed the professional ladder to success without ANY one giving them wisdom? I am curious as to who.

So my first position, is that the statement that this life, this goal, this achievement can be done without any help is a false one. People may not support you when, how, or in the exact manner that you prefer, but they are there for you. And they support you! Say thank you and be appreciative of what they ARE doing rather than focusing on what they are not doing.

Now on to my second point, let's hypothetically say that you can do it all alone. You have no support, no help, no team you, to help you get there. Just because you can, does it make it a good idea? Do you want to be the one that gets up with the kids EVERY single time they cry or go to the school EVERY single time they have something? Do you really want to be the one that has to go to every sales meeting, process every invoice, and produce every product during the duration of your business? I certainly hope not, and here is why… Diversity is important and simply put, we are better together. Trying to be all things to all people is ultimately a burn out waiting to happen. And I encourage you not to let that happen.

So what is the life empowered moment for today? I am glad you asked… Just because you can,doesn't mean you should. Recognize, leverage and appreciate all of those that support you and even those that don't, and that can be used as mere motivation as well.

Sometimes we allow the baggage from our past to keep from realizing the true beauty of our future.

That move into our future is not always a physical move but it's an emotional, mental, a psychological one. We have to be remember that where ever we go, we take us with us, so unless we truly let go of the baggage, we simply drag it alone.

This continual weight and burden of un forgiveness, hurt, disappointment, and distrust is what causes failed marriages, families, and future goals.

Now, I know that it's not enough to just say let it go, but the real question is how…

I am so glad you asked.. Here is how!

1) Don't ignore the situation. Acknowledge it, and how it makes you feel. Be honest with yourself. 2) Feel all of the emotions, the hurt, frustration, anger, what ever it is, feel it. As a result, cry if you must, laugh if you must, even get angry if you must. 3) Make a decision to forgive the person, the situation, the company, yourself, whatever it is, make the decision to forgive. 4) Practice positivity by celebrating the lesson learned from the situation. 5) Repeat 3 and 4 until you have let it go.

There are going to be times in your life in which you get tired. Tired of the same old thing, and you will be looking for more. And let's face it, in the world of facebook, twitter, instagram, social media as a whole, it's easy to look at what everyone else is doing and feel as though your contributions are not enough. However, one thing that you have to do is replace your feelings with facts. Begin to ask yourself, are you contributing where you are supposed to, meaning, your family, your friends, your career, and your goals? Are you looking at where you started and comparing to where you are? Do you see your growth?

If there are things that you want to impact greater or change, how are your working towards that? Before you know it, your distractions by others and what they are doing will be overshadowed by you being preoccupied doing what you are supposed to be doing.

So your life empowered moment is this… Don't worry about what everyone else is doing. You just do what you are supposed to. Continue to challenge you and step out of your comfort zone in the pursuit of your own happiness.