Stuffed Up Yet Again

I stuffed up yet again today, I wasn’t very nice to someone who has only just started coming back to the venue where I volunteer at and I had upset them. I didn’t mean to.

The employer isn’t happy with me because I’ve upset another customer because I wasn’t being nice to them. They told me that I should know how to be nice to people since I’m an adult now and that for most people, it’s easy to smile at people and be nice to them. They are getting sick of me doing that and scaring people away.

Perhaps I’m too used of people being mean to me. I used to be bullied at school and was always suspicious when people were being nice to me. They used to do that as a way to tease me and be able to use something to bully me with.

Perhaps I’m so used to being bullied that I don’t know how to be nice to people or know what to do properly when people are being nice to me. I’m not one who likes getting compliments, especially ones about my looks.

Why am I so horrible and why can’t I learn how to be nice to people all the time?