Because work should be done excellently and work should be "ensouling"

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Duck, Regrets & Judo Masters: How Regret Can Be Good

The face of the elderly woman on my TV screen is moving in
painful contortions as she repeats a single phrase over and over, “If only…if
only…if only…” It is gut-wrenching to
watch. She is a prisoner to the regrets
of her childhood past, which she spent as an orphan. Her life is little more than a cautionary
tale for us: left unchecked, regret will
embitter our hearts and choke the joy out of our lives completely.

But you can transform regret into a powerful
tool for good. In order to do that, you’ve got to become a judo master in the
way you handle it. Take the energy of regret when it comes rushing into your head
and hurtle it into the future. Simply
ask, “If I continue on my current path in life without any changes, what
regrets will I have in my last days?”

If you allow that question to percolate deeply, it is bound
to change how and why you work today. For
some people, answering the question will help them choose to work fewer hours. For others it will have the opposite effect,
it will motivate them to work much harder.
It might make you more willing to take risks with your career. It might give you the courage to forgive someone
that brutally put you down. It might empower you to confront someone that has
been taking advantage of you. For sure it will make lasting impacts on anyone
who is willing to ask it and then let it plumb their soul.

This last week, "Duck", a college friend of mine from 30 years ago
died with no warning, leaving behind a wife, children and many friends to
stumble through the sudden loss. He
never reached the age when most people struggle with accumulated regrets. And it has reminded me that there is no
better time than today to perform judo on my own potential regrets, allowing
them to be a powerful catalyst for change in my life today.

“For us to get real
results in the real world, we must be in touch with what is, not what we wish
things were or think things should be or are led by others to believe they
are. The only thing that is going to be
real in the end is what is.” - Dr. Henry
Cloud

L to R: Mike "Duck" Taylor, me, my wife Kathi and Michael Hairston after a road race in Mulvane, Kansas in 1982.
To quote Neil Young, "Long may you run."