Why yes, October starts just a couple days from now... I was surprised to see it pop up so soon as well.

You may remember that I’ve done this the past two years here and here. Well, here I go again for a third year and surprisingly, I’ve still got enough material for at least 10 more of these, if the board stays up that long (Fingers crossed!). I’ve tweaked the format again this year by putting the films in alphabetical order, given links on other items or websites of interest, and I’ve added a rating system (stolen somewhat from the great Chas Balun!) 1 Skull = ‘GOOD FILM’, 2 Skulls = ‘GREAT FILM”, 3 Skulls = “HOLY SHIT, THIS IS AN AWESOME FILM!”, 4 Skulls = “YOU MIGHT AS WELL KILL YOURSELF IF YOU DON’T SEE THIS FILM!” and if it’s bad, which a couple of these are, it gets the Ugly Dog (Literally!). But keep in mind that just because a movie deserves the dog, doesn’t mean to avoid it, because some of the worst films ever made have fans. Hell, if it’s listed here, you know I love it, so there you go. Some of these may not be available to purchase, so those will just have its IMDB page linked, but all others are available through the wonderful people over at AMAZON. { Sorry, you must be logged in to see this text! } If I in any way help you find a film you enjoy, or remind you of one you’ve seen before and had no idea what it was, let me know… now on with the show.

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AFTERMATH (1994) – What you got here is a short film (about a half hour in length) that takes place in a morgue. Let’s just say that there’s an autopsy performed on a body and another ‘type’ of exam performed on another body. What makes this film special is that it’s rather beautifully shot and its content doesn’t in any way match what you see. This is very disturbing and NOT for the squeamish.

AMOKLAUF (1994) – Directed by Uwe Boll. Yes THAT Uwe Boll, the guy we all love to hate. Ordinarily, he puts out shit films, but this wasn’t always the case. AMOKLAUF is about a German waiter who has a very boring life. So boring, in fact, that after a regular day at work, he comes home to watch slaughter house tapes and porn and masturbate. He gets interrupted by his rather beautiful neighbor who he, seemingly for no reason, kills her and displays her dead body so that it can watch him finish his ‘self abuse’. Then he goes off on a killing spree. Watching this was quite strange, because if It didn’t say ‘Directed By Uwe Boll’ in the beginning, you’d never even consider that it was. It was quite good and sadly is the last good thing he’ll ever do. So much promise here, only to be shattered by everything he’s touched since.

THE BURNING MOON (1992) – This is an anthology film. It features a drugged up guy telling his little sister two bedtime stories. The first story is about a girl who goes on a date with a serial killer, it’s bloody but just ok. The second story, however, is the money shot. It’s about a priest who rapes and kills women, and then he kills himself. Then, some idiot goes and kills an innocent man because he thinks this guy was the killer. Then it gets interesting in the final ten minutes where we go to hell. Hell is fucking nasty as can be. This final segment completely makes the film a masterpiece.

THE CARPENTER (1989) – The always entertaining Wings Hauser stars in this haunted house story about an electrocuted killer who comes back to work on the house he was working on before he went nuts and killed some people. The houses new owner, who just got out of a mental hospital, and has a cheating husband, falls for the Carpenter and they kill a few people before things get really bad. It’s a rather average film made memorable by the excellent Wings Hauser and some interesting killings.

THE CHANGLING (1980) – George C Scott stars in this creepy film about a house that is haunted by a dead child. There’s no over the top blood and guts, as with the films I usually enjoy and there isn’t any flashy special effects either. Also, there wasn’t any harsh language or nudity, which makes one wonder why it was given an R rating. This said, it still delivers the chills and spookiness that most films made today only wish they could have. This was based on a true story.

CHERRY FALLS (2000) – What went wrong with this film. It was so original and different then all the other films that came out around the same time (SCREAM, URBAN LEGENDS, VALENTINE) and had a good director with Geoffrey Wright (ROMPER STOMPER) and even a decent cast of Brittany Murphy, Michael Beihn, and Jay Mohr; yet it still got completely ignored and made it’s big premiere on the USA Network on a Saturday night when no one watches television. It centers around a small town where a killer goes around killing virgins. In its original form, it was very bloody and nasty and had boobs galore yet all the nudity and gore was cut out for its R rating, and then cut EVEN MORE for the USA Network. Very sad but still good, surprisingly.

THE CHURCH (LA CHIESA) (1989) – This style over substance Italian horror film was originally going to be titled DEMONS III, but the director, wanting to do something a little different, made a few changes to the script and while it still could be called DEMONS III, it’s tweaked just enough to be better then that. Beautifully shot cinematography, haunting score by Keith Emerson, and produced under the watchful eyes of Dario Argento, this film is a winner in every possible way.

THE DEAD HATE THE LIVING (2000) – It’s a Zombie film. It’s about a film crew making a zombie film in an abandoned hospital where they accidentally open a doorway to another dimension where zombies come from. It’s rather cheesy, but damn it, the film makers sure try hard to make the most of what they have to give us a decent fright flick. This was obviously made by horror geeks who feel they are far cooler then I am. There were dozens of little horror film in-jokes thrown in for people to say “HEY, I get that!” and damn it if I didn’t think that throughout the entire film. This is a film that would have been very high on the list for a potential MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 episode.

THE DEAD NEXT DOOR (1988) – This little zombie film has a few big names behind it. It was produced by Sam Raimi and features Bruce Campbell (well, his voice anyway…) and Scott Spiegel. This was made for very little money, just like THE EVIL DEAD, and it shows, but its charm is that it’s really disgusting. I’m guessing that all the actors worked for free and what money they had all went into the effects budget. There is a throat ripping or body part getting thrown about with blood splatting every couple of minutes. Evidently, some of the actors were SO BAD that Bruce Campbell dubbed over the voices for them.

YI BOH LAAI BENG DUK (EBOLA SYNDROME) (1996) – I’ve probably mentioned THE UNTOLD STORY before somewhere on the board. It was a sick, demented film where a guy takes over a restraint by killing the owner and his family and making food out of the bodies. The star of the film ( Anthony Wong) won China’s equivalent of an Academy Award for his portrayal of the scumbag killer. Well the director and star also did another film that was even more over the top then that. In this one Wong plays another scumbag who is so hardcore, he contracts the ebola virus, becomes immune to it, and then he gets REALLY pissed off and proceeds to pass the virus on to other people. That’s a hardcore bastard if I’ve ever heard of one.

HARDGORE (1974) – WOW! What can one say about the seventies. They made some pretty sick films back then and this is one of them. This twisted porn film is about a woman who is sent to a sanitarium run by a satanic cult. There are orgies every night and cult members get their penises cut off with hedge clippers and their heads cut off. Blood spurting right on screen from between the legs and all over the place. Seriously, this was some sick shit right here, and I’ve watched it at least… a few dozen times, so I think I’d be the one to know. This is the first one to earn the Ugly Dog rating. The reason isn’t the film itself, which I probably give it two skulls, but for the quality of the copy I have. It’s a dub, of a dub, of a dub from a videotape. It’s a fourth generation copy that a friend gave me about a decade or so ago. The same friend recently told me about this site he found where he’s ordered it on DVD. The DVD he got was a first generation dub from an original store bought video tape where the picture is much less fuzzy and brighter, which I can’t wait to get myself.

HAUSU (HOUSE) (1977) – The closest I can come to describing this film is that it’s BEETLEJUICE as directed by Akira Kurosawa. This is a strange film about seven girls who go to visit the aunt of one of them only to find out that the aunt is dead and her house is actually a demon who eats virgins.

HEI TAI YANG 731 (MEN BEHIND THE SUN) (1988) – We all know about the atrocities committed by the Nazis during WWII, but what the things going on over in Japan. How come you don’t hear much about them? Well, here you go. The Japanese had death camps of their own where they mutilated and tortured prisoners AND animals as well. The effects are quite sickening in this and the main reason is because it’s not all ‘special effects’. They used actual human corpses (some children…) and live animals to film this. The worst scene, I’d guess for most, has rats eating a live cat. Yeah, you read that correctly. Then the set the rats on fire! They’ve also got a child’s dead body being used in an autopsy scene. Personally, something that I thought went a little too far showed a woman’s baby being thrown to the ground and covered with snow to shut it up… not even bothering to kill it, as if it would be too much effort!

HIGHWAYMEN (2003) – In 1986, director Robert Harmon gave us a wonderful little film called THE HITCHER, which was an instant classic about a poor sap who is followed by a serial killer and chaos happens all over the place. Almost two decades later, the same director gives us another film that could almost be a direct sequel. This film is about a serial killer who kills with his 1972 El Dorado! There is also a man who’s after the killer for taking out his wife and he won’t stop until he gets him. This stars Jim Caviezel, who you might remember as Jesus from that ‘PASSION’ movie. (Hahaha!)

I KNOW WHO KILLED ME (2007) – Yeah, you read this correctly. I’m saying this is a film worth seeing and that we all made a mistake ignoring it when it was released just a few months ago. This shit was CRAZY! I’m talking SHOWGIRLS crazy. I’m also talking gory/bloody crazy and the plot (as it was) was surprisingly entertaining. Lindsay Lohan was probably really fucked up when she decided to do this film, but damn it if she didn’t make it work. Any actress who can play a role where her character duck tapes a finger back on and plays a stripper missing a hand and a foot is a far braver choice then any shit characters who hold guns and whine about wanting their dog back.

INTRUDER (1989) – This twisted slasher film set in a grocery store, which might be a first for this type of movie. It features the deaths of Sam and Ted Raimi (JOXER dies AGAIN? DAMN!!!) so there’s certainly that to look forward to. Tons of interesting deaths by meat hooks, meat slicers, garbage chutes, all the things you probably can think of in a grocery store. All the deaths are rather in your face and bloody as well. There’s even the ‘surprise twist’ ending with who the killer is. This is well worth watching and even owning. Should I mention the Bruce Campbell cameo?

IT’S ALIVE III: ISLAND OF THE ALIVE (1987) – Another film that is completely ignored by everyone buy me, seemingly, this sad little sequel came straight to video and I think I was probably the only person who rented it from the video store I found it at. It starred Michael Moriarty, Karen Black, and Gerrit Graham, so you know the acting is top shelf. Written and directed by Larry Cohen, who did such classics as the original IT’S ALIVE, Q: THE WINGED SERPENT, and THE STUFF so you know it’s gotta be awesome, right? Well, yes, it is, but sadly, I’ve known people who didn’t even know this film existed. Seriously, what’s wrong with people?

JACK'S BACK (1988) – 100 years after the Jack The Ripper slayings, someone in Los Angeles decides to re-enact the murders, hence the title of the film. James Spader plays a college student who gets killed when he happens upon the last killing. Spader also plays the now dead students twin brother, who is accused of the murders. There is way too much plot going on here for this type of film, and that is what makes this whole thing interesting.

THE KISS (1988) – Joanna Pacula... damn I love her. She plays a woman who might have killed her sister so she could move in with the sisters family to do evil voodoo stuff. There’s a bunch of sex scenes and one rather nice decapitation by a mall escalator, so it’s got everything a guy could possibly want in a horror film.

THE LAST HOUSE ON DEAD END STREET (1977) – After repaying society with a year in jail, ex-con Terry Hawkins decides to repay society for locking him up by making a snuff film. He and some friends take some ‘actors’ supposedly to shoot a film. Now these are the blandest people around and no one is gonna miss them. Then they drive out to an abandoned house for filming. Chaos ensues, of course. The acting, as you might imagine, is bad, but here, something magical happens. As the film progresses and the people start to wise up on what’s really happening, they start acting better. Like real people not on camera ‘acting’. This gives the film more depth and gives the viewer more of a realistic feeling towards the film, which works really well since it’s supposed to be a snuff film. Then we get to the gore, and it’s quite nasty. There is also some cattle mutilation thrown in, if that’s your thing.

PIECES (1982) – Someone on the campus of this University is killing women and stealing body parts. On the one hand, this sounds like one of a hundred other films, but this was written by Joe D’Amato, director of such classics as ANTHROPOPHAGOUS and EMANUELLE AND THE LAST CANNIBALS.

THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM (1991) – STUART GORDON (RE ANIMATOR, FROM BEYOND, ROBOT JOX!) directs this movie based on Edgar Allen Poe’s short story. Well, I suppose this would have been ‘by the numbers’ if he hadn’t gotten Lance Henrikson to play Torquemada and Jeffrey Combs to play a scribe writing down the witches confessions. Combs owns every scene he’s in with great lines like “How can they confess if they don’t have TONGUES?!?!?” Kudos all around for this little gem that was supposedly made for less then $2 million but looks like double that.

POSESSION (1981) – This movie is kind of hard to describe. I could probably give three different plot synapses for it and each one will work and you’d still have a hard time following it. Hell, I sat through this film at least three times trying to figure out all that was happening. On of the best ways to sum it up is by telling you that the female lead, Isabelle Adjani, tried to commit suicide after seeing the complete film because she was so shocked by it that she thought it would be the end of her career and that no one would ever hire her again. Oddly enough, she was completely wrong and she even won an acting award for it! This DVD version is a double feature and comes with SHOCK, directed by Mario Bava! This is a great deal you would be getting here.

ROCK ‘N’ ROLL NIGHTMARE (1987) – Hot DAMN, this film ‘RAWKS!’ Let’s see, it’s made in Canada! It stars a ‘rocker’ who thinks of himself as a movie star and takes himself far too seriously. People die and it ends with a wrestling match between Jon Mikl Thor and Satan… and Thor is wearing a spiked THONG. Honestly, how can ANYONE skip this classic?

SCHRAMM (1993) – Director Jorg Buttgereit ( NEKROMANTIK and NEKROMANTIK 2… CLASSICS!!!) makes us squirm and puke yet again with his twisted mind. This time, instead of necrophilia, we get death… and lots of it. He gives us a look into the mind of a serial killer, yet, unlike all those other films like this, we bypass the whole ‘police are after him’ bits and just get to the juicy stuff. Like how he has a very mundane life. Dare I say it… this is ALMOST as good as Uwe’s AMOKLAUF. Upping the insanity of this film, we get a guy committing suicide right outside his apartment for no apparent reason, and the there’s the nails through the penis scene, which will probably make you lose your lunch… breakfast… dinner from last night… shit you’ll probably have dry heaves for a few days after it. Oh yeah, and I lied about the necrophilia cause that’s the reason he abuses his penis. HAHA, GOT YOU!

SLUGS: THE MOVIE (1988) – Based on a book by Shaun Hutson, this sick little film features man eating slugs. (HEY, it’s ALSO by the same director who did PIECES, five spots above this… go figure?) SLUGS could be considered an eco-horror film because mans pollution is what caused them to become ravenous meat eaters. Not only are the human characters in the film responsible for creating the slugs, but the way they decide to get rid of them is equally as harmful to the environment. I’m telling you, you end up praying the slugs eat everyone here.

THOU SHALT NOT KILL… EXCEPT (1985) – Five words that could make or break this film for you… SAM RAIMI AS CHARLES MANSON. Well, a Manson type character anyway, but still, this really made the film for me. There was also the obligatory Ted Raimi cameo and with Bruce Campbell has a small bit as well. Campbell also helped write this film. It’s your typical Vietnam War vet revenge film, but with some horror elements thrown in like the Manson character and some really nasty bloody killings. The DVD features Bruce Campbell’s audio commentary, which is awesome.

TROUBLE EVERY DAY (2001) – This movie is not for you. I’m pretty sure not a single person on this board other then myself has seen this, and when you read about it, you’ll avoid it like the plague. Vincent Gallo and Beatrice Dalle give incredible performances as two people inflicted with the same mental disorder… they feel the need to eat the flesh of the person they are having sex with. Directed by Claire Denis… I’m gonna stop there. Claire Denis is a really great writer/director, but she’s just a bit to ‘arty’ for most people. She likes to have a little dialog in her films as possible, forcing the actors to get the story across with facial expressions and body language. The first twenty minutes of this film doesn’t have a single word of dialogue in it. The film has some bloody stuff throughout, but right near the end is where it goes to hell. During a screening at the Cannes Film Festival, people were fainting and it almost caused a riot. All this having been said, this is probably the best film on this list and anyone who’s interested should try to see it.

UNMASKED: PART 25 (1988) – Here, we have another serial killer film that’s not like all the others. This time, there’s a more comedic slant to it with all the over the top deaths. Jackson is a serial killer who is starting to question his purpose in life. He even lets us into his life and allow us to get to know him. He’s not just a nameless, quiet killer, he’s a soft spoken, Byron reading man who falls in love with a blind woman. Really deep, thought provoking stuff here. …I hope you don’t think I’m getting soft here. I’ll mention that the opening five minutes has one of the grossest, bloodiest killings ever where he rips a guys face off and then punches through the guys chest and rips out the heart. All soaked in glorious blood. YOWSERS!

ZOMBI 4: AFTER DEATH (1988) – Starring Jeff Stryker, of such films as all those gay pornos made in the eighties… yeah, just about ALL of them. There is tons of Zombie death goodness in this movie. These are the fast moving zombies too, not the ones where you could walk faster then them. These zombies are some nasty.

Originally posted by CerebusCHERRY FALLS (2000) – What went wrong with this film. It was so original and different then all the other films that came out around the same time (SCREAM, URBAN LEGENDS, VALENTINE) and had a good director with Geoffrey Wright (ROMPER STOMPER) and even a decent cast of Brittany Murphy, Michael Beihn, and Jay Mohr; yet it still got completely ignored and made it’s big premiere on the USA Network on a Saturday night when no one watches television. It centers around a small town where a killer goes around killing virgins. In its original form, it was very bloody and nasty and had boobs galore yet all the nudity and gore was cut out for its R rating, and then cut EVEN MORE for the USA Network. Very sad but still good, surprisingly.

Despite its flaws, I [heart] this film, partly because it turns the usual horror tropes on their head about teens who have sex immediately getting killed, since in this film it is the teens who AREN'T having sex who get turned into sushi.

I also adore the way that the movie follows this idea to its logical conclusion where the entire town comes to the conclusion that the only way to save the teens is for them all to have sex leading to a massive orgy preceeded by a hilarious sequence where the town's biggest slut gives sex tips to all the (still) virginal girls on the front lawn of the high school.