The REAL Danger of 2017

Forget Nazis, nuclear bombs, and narcissistic presidents. When will people realise the real danger of 2017? By this I mean of course, Big Ben’s selfish silencing.

It may come as a surprise to some of you, so brace yourselves, but Big Ben’s chimes (famous for bringing people together in times of hardship) will be no more. Well, for a couple years anyway. You may want to deny this but the final stage of recovery is acceptance, so we must all face this terrible truth.

Unsurprisingly, since the news of Ben’s strike was leaked, there has been chaos in the streets. The crime rate has risen by 700%, Birmingham has declared war on London, and people are having to resort to sun-dials to turn up to work on time.

However, amidst all this trauma, we thankfully have a government that prioritises the right things in life. Whilst they could have been wasting their time worrying about the 1,182,954 food parcels that are given out by foodbanks to starving families, a group of MPs selflessly paid their respects to the tremendous tower with their ‘heads bowed but hope in [their] hearts’. We are so lucky.

It is a sad day when the health and safety of workers are prioritised over our time-telling needs. I mean, it’s not like they sell mini-versions of Big Ben to strap on your wrist or keep in your pocket.

Well lovely people, I’m going to spend my evening looking back on the fond memories I had with Big Ben and would love to hear yours in the comments below.