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freedom stories – D & D

Him – There are different types of freedom. When you are locked up freedom is doing what you want to do. When you are younger you think life is forever. The older you get you realise how short life is. The last time I was locked up was before my first child.

At that time you were getting into trouble because you were trying to fit in with people. Freedom was a matter of “fuck you” about the consequences. You don’t need to fit anymore. The only time you feel free when you are locked up is for recreation. Then you are locked up again. If you wanted to go to the toilet you had to ring a bell and it might be an hour before you might go. At that time you had no telly.

I remember when I was locked up I couldn’t read or write. When I was in I learned how to read and write. The very first book I read was A Sense of Freedom by Jimmy Boyle. Now he is a TD. You find that words that you don’t know at the start of it, they come into place by the end of it. That’s how I learned to read. All the years I was in school I couldn’t read a thing. When I learned to read I could do couriering and could get a job out of that. I couldn’t go for a job because I couldn’t read and write. When I learned I got my first a job.

Freedom is to get up in morning. To do what you want. To go to the shop when you want. When you are locked up you realise what your freedom really means to you. You take it for granted until your freedom is taken. Then you realise what you had and what you haven’t got. Jump on the bus. Walk in the park. Make a phone call. To look at the telly when you want.

Her – Freedom is also peace of mind. Not constantly worrying about someone. You know where they are and know when they are safe. I know where they are so my worry is over with them. The way I felt about my sister was always worry, worry, worry, worry. When she passed away she went into God’s arms. I couldn’t get over that we were there with her. When she was back on the street I never had that peace. Freedom is knowing she is back in the Lord’s hands. It is a weight lifted off. There is a great freedom to know she is safe. (His) ma was free when he was locked up because she knew he was safe at night.

Him – I would rather peace in my mind than not be locked up. When you are out you are done. If you have problems in your head that will last a life time. You never know when you will get put into a mental prison again. If you walk away in freedom you might be back in again in 6 months.