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Monthly Archives: August 2016

Check it! I sewed my first thing in a long time (years even). I got two different types of fabric at Joanns – a fox printed cotton and a bright yellow canvas. I hand-sewed this (/struggle). Lol, it’s not that pretty, but I’m pleased I got it done in two days!

I’m excited to put my next knitting or crochet project in the bag. I even have some bit of fabric left over that I’m tempted to make into dolly clothing 😮 .

So, it’s nearing a month since the big move. I’m feeling… melancholy… Maybe even ambivalent. Sometimes I think I’m afraid to let myself be happy, and so I focus on the negative. Like, I know I should be happy that I’m in California, but it doesn’t feel permanent. I think it’s because my job and living situation are both short term. I don’t feel established. I feel like at any moment, I can get swept away.

It’s weird.

I’ve been trying to knit again, and I managed to knit up a dress out of this lace weight mohair yarn I’ve been holding onto for a while. I like how floaty the material is.

I purchased a couple of patterns on Ravelry, and I’m excited to start making clothes for my two girls again.

I’ve also started watching Orange is the New Black (I’m late to the boat). I’m kind of hooked, and I’m currently on season 2.

I finally got a bit of “Me” time in the past two days. I’ve been in California for 13 days (/mind blown), and I spent the first week and a half stressing out about basic life stuff like:

Finding a job

Finding a place to live – half check

Getting a car – check

I can safely say that I’ve done 1.5 of the above. So, I spent today and yesterday in a zoned-out stupor, trying to relax. Trying, and only semi-succeeding.

I did manage to do two hobby related things! I FINALLY finished my WiP – the Simple Things shawl. Check it:

I have to block it, but I’m so pleased with how it came out!! I love how speckled the hand-dyed yarn is. I really can’t wait until it gets cooler for me to start wearing this. I wouldn’t say that this project flew off my needles, as I think it took me about a month (I’m so slow at knitting).

I think my next project will be a pair of socks… Or maybe a dolly thing. Doll things knit up way faster, and I’m kind of over time-consuming projects for now.

I also finally redressed Prisma. She is my one girl that looks really good in black and white. For good measure, I also put these large black frames on her (to match all those bespectacled cats).

Just a rambly (quite possibly long) update. It’s been a whole week since I moved westward, and I’m not sure the reality of the changes has hit me yet. My brain tends to put a negative spin on everything (a bad habit I’m trying to correct), and try as I might, I can’t shake off these thoughts:

I’m technically homeless.

I’m unemployed.

The money… It slips through my fingers (insert Mulan reference here).

I miss my cat.

I’m no longer in NYC.

I’m a New Yorker in California… Which, I guess isn’t all that rare – people relocate all the time. I think I still might be on New York time, as I woke up at 7AM naturally. I went for a walk, and it feels kind of like a waking dream. There’s hummingbirds and bunnies just going about their business in the neighborhood.

It really does feel surreal. Everything feels different – even my sweat feels different (it was explained to me that this is because there’s no humidity here. Bizarre).

I’m really glad I decided to see my old therapist before leaving everything I knew. She really helped me keep grounded before the move, and I try to remember her words and practice her advice every day I’m here. Here’s my list of positives:

It’s so beautiful here. It’s so serene.

I feel less like I’m being smothered by a sea of angry people.

I have a support system here.

I have a support system in NYC too.

I haven’t been able to do many doll things while here. I think it’s because if I’m not trying to get my life in order, I’m napping because I’m exhausted. Once I get settled (hopefully soon), I’ll be able to take my girls out for some photos.

I’m currently in mild procrastination mode, starting my new life on the other side of the country. It’s weird being in California, since I’ve lived in NYC my whole life. It still hasn’t hit me yet that this is my new home. Everything is so foreign – the layout of the streets, the lack of the hustle and bustle, the weather…

I tried to bring as much of my home with me, but only managed to bring two dolls – Prisma and Remi. 😦 Marina and Finley couldn’t make the trip this time around, but once I’m settled (and no longer technically homeless), I will most likely have them shipped to me.

I think another comforting thing about my dolls and this hobby is that I can always depend on my girls to never change. They’re sort of a constant in my every day life. I started to feel a big overwhelmed yesterday night, so I decided to just redress Remington for fun.

Remington is wearing a sweater I knitted, a minijijo tutu, and her stock shoes (which, fun fact, have magnets on the bottom!).

I intend to redress Prisma tonight… And maybe hopefully take these two girls out for some photos.