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Sharon Needles and Honey Boo Boo Front-Runners in Presidential Race

In a surprising turn of events, it was recently announced that the Gore & Glitz ticket of Sharon Needles and Honey Boo Boo has recently surpassed both President Obama and former governor Mitt Romney in the polls.

“I can’t say I’m really surprised,” said Ms. Needles, “America wants a change, and I’m just the corpse to give it to them.” Winner of the 4th season of RuPaul’s Drag Race, Ms. Needles proved her political acumen in an episode entitled “Frock the Vote.” It was there that her slogan of “Sharon Needles: Sharing Responsibilities” was born.

Her running mate is Alana Thompson, better known as Honey Boo Boo. Ms. Thompson’s reality television show surpassed both the Democratic and Republican National Conventions in ratings earlier in the race. Honey Boo Boo has tested extremely well with rural voters and plans focus her campaign efforts strengthening these ties in the fifteen days before the election.

“I’m kind of disappointed that I won’t win a crown,” she said at a press conference earlier today, “But I am looking forward to redecorating the white house with pink and lots of glitter.”

Both President Obama and Mr. Romney were unavailable for comment on this clear upset to their respective campaigns. One thing remains clear: it’s a close race and all votes are needed.