11.19.2010

Can I tell you a secret?

I recently became single after four years of marriage and this whole dating this has me a little… kerfluffered. The last time I was in this position I met men the old-fashioned way: by getting drunk at bars or browbeating friends until they caved and scrounged up a single friend.

After months of toiling away in my basement (trolling the internet) and wondering where exactly all the single men ARE, I've discovered that I'm rather infatuated with someone. I'm a little embarrassed to bring it up here but I just can't keep it quiet any longer.

First, he's gorgeous. I mean, come on. He greets me every morning with a brilliant smile that lightens my mood—even if he didn't make the coffee this morning or put away the dishes like I'd hoped—and never seems to notice that I slept with my head wedged between three pillows, or the fact that mascara has set up permanent camp on my eyebags.

Second, we have a ton in common. We both like movies and sports and reading, and while we don't necessarily agree on WHICH movies and sports and books, we like them in general so that should be enough. Can't you just picture us reading in front of the TV with a generic movie or sporting event playing softly in the background?

Third, he doesn't judge me for my online shenanigans. He just sits alongside me and smiles at my friends, laughing his nonchalant, "I don't have a care in the world but I'm very smart and a kind person" laugh. He puts up with my spastic ideas and is always ready for whatever catches my interest that day.

Really the only negative that I can see is he's trapped inside my computer in the dating site ads on Facebook. But he really is very pretty.