Tag Archives:children

Providing kids with lots of downtime is the key to a perfect summer!

With the summer here, there’s no denying that our schedules are a mix of amazing summer fun and lazy summer days. This is the kind of balance we strive for.

When we are at home and not hitting the road on an adventure or visiting a local park with friends or family, our routine is a simple affair. PJs are often left on for a good chunk of the day (if they are changed out of at all), and the kids have a variety of favourite activities that they like to spend time doing. My daughter loves to create art pieces and draw. My son likes to make comic strips. They like to read, and of course they love to play video games. Some days have too much screen time, but that’s all part of the summer.

As an adult, I find myself learning from my children all the time. The children in our lives teach us daily how to look at every minute with joy. They teach us to hold onto those moments that are fleeting and live within them, not past them. I love reliving my own youthful exuberance and discovering a new love for life thanks to the magic of childhood.

One of the most important lessons I’m learning now that I am in my thirties is thanks to my 6 year old. She’s teaching me about confidence. And while that may seem like it should be reversed, it’s true. It’s bizarre that I can’t remember a time when I truly felt confident. Was it when I was 6? I think I was fairly precocious and held my own back then. When did that confidence start to wane? In my pre-teen years maybe? Likely.

It’s always been something that I’ve had to work on, and yet, as I get older, I am finding a renewed sense of confidence thanks to my daughter. She is a kind soul mixed together with a spit-fire approach to life. She doesn’t ask if the water is cold before she goes in, she just jumps. She doesn’t ask permission to be herself, she just is. And I admire that.

When you offer her a compliment she has a fairly standard response most of the time. It doesn’t matter if you are telling her how hard she worked on something, how clever she is, how you love her fashion choices in her outfit, she typically responds with two words that many of us would never imagine uttering: I know.

Think about that. We would say ‘you did such a great job!’ and she responds ‘I know.’ Just like that. No hesitation.

Sure, sometimes she’ll say thank you, or coyly turn away, but most of the time she is steadfast in her belief that of course what she did was wonderful. She knows she put the work in and she’s confidence enough to not feel bad for that.

Don’t you wish we felt like that sometimes? For many of us, if we admit that we believe we are amazing at something, it could be seen as bragging. We downplay our accomplishments. Confidence to some comes across as boasting, which has been frowned upon. We take compliments and turn them around or disagree. I try to at least say thank you to a compliment, but how many times do I then qualify it somehow. “Oh, thank you for noticing that work I did, but…” Why would I add the ‘but’?”But, if I had more time it would have been better.” Or “but, it really is just a cruddy old shirt I put on.”

So, I am learning from my 6 year old that it’s okay to admit that I know I’ve done something well. Two simple words that seem to be so hard to say, and yet, my 6 year old has no problem doing so. She knows how she feels about herself. Why can’t we feel the same way as we get older?

We are fiercely protective of this confidence that she has. I hope she never loses it. It’s part of what makes her so special. It’s truly a quality to be admired. We try to communicate that she’s not defined by any one thing in life – her choices, her actions, her looks – that she can be who she wants to be.

This weekend, I signed my son up for the Mining and Gaming workshop at the Canada Aviation and Space Museum. Basically, he played Minecraft with other kids his age for 3 hours. And yes, he loved it.

The workshop is divided into two different time slots by age (beginning at age 8) and has been running since the end of February on select days for March Break. It continues next weekend and throughout March Break in the Ottawa area.

While the kids share a special server and play the game as usual by finding minerals and more, there is a twist: each session group is working towards building a spaceship. This means that certain materials will be better than others to use, that they have to work as a team and get creative in their design. It’s chaos at first but really fun to see how the group comes together to complete their task. The Museum will be putting photos of the finished ships on Facebook.

The event takes place in the auditorium which is set up with large screen computers (one for each participant) and a display about space and mining. There is a large screen at the front of the room as well that follows the teacher participants.

The teachers start the day with a short presentation at the beginning about space and mining and what the goal of the morning is. Then they dig right in and the rest of the time is spent playing and gathering materials and then making their group spaceship.

The kids all had an understanding of the game already and everyone seemed to really enjoy it. My son has said ‘thank you’ for signing him up multiple times and has said he would do it again (hint hint mom).

If you are looking for a half-day March break activity for your kids and they are 8 years old or older, this may be the perfect spot.

The workshop costs $25 but that includes entry into the museum as well. Details, dates, ages and registration information can be found on the website.

The big news (well, in my little geeky world) last week was the release of old school games that many of us played as kids online.

We’re talking Oregon Trail, Castle Wolfenstein (uggg those dogs!!), and Where in the World is Carmen San Diego, just to name a few. You can visit this website to kill a few hours reliving your childhood.

I introduced the kids to Oregon Trail and Carmen San Diego that same day after school. I explained to them the significance of these games.

“You see kids,” I began “when I was a kid, I was obsessed with some video games too. Like you are about Minecraft. You already know how much I love Mario, but here area few games that were equally addictive.”

As I felt giddy loading up the games, I realized that every time I nag the kids to get off the screens, I was once like them. Sure, we didn’t have the graphics and the YouTube channel tutorials to go along with our games, but didn’t we want to play them all the time too?

At school, on our old track-ball computers, we had Oregon Trail. We had a rotating computer schedule to play the game, but sometimes, as a reward for finishing work early or good behaviour, we scored extra time on the game. I need to remind myself how it felt to play such a basic (but amazing) game back then. My own kids likely feel the same when they turn on their favourites.

Back to my kids’ education about these games. Carmen San Diego is a lot easier to play as an adult. At least, as an adult with some world knowledge about where certain animals live and what colours are on country flags. Take that game! I totally rule you now. The kids (especially my history/world-loving son) were enthralled with this. But wait a meaning, are we learning something along the way? Games can be educational?! What?!

Then it was on to Oregon Trail. The kids mostly wanted to keep pressing space bar to continue on our journey without breaks, but I convinced them, once well stocked on food, that we also needed to rest.

One of our characters names was Tommy.

He got dysentery, of course.

This made my daughter sad. Then we tried to cross the river. Tommy drowned. This made her really sad! Yikes. Poor Tommy, we barely knew ye.

My son has added these games to his ‘games folder’ on the computer. It’s hilarious watching them play games that kept my attention for so long when I was about their age.

Have you checked out these games? Did they give you the same sense of nostalgia that I felt?

Just for fun, I’ve put together a few that I have experienced (over and over). Be sure to add your own in the comments!

1- The kids have the whole house to play but choose to play within 5 feet of whatever you are doing or trying to clean up.

2- When they say your name 12 times in a row to get your attention, then if/when you finally reply they say nothing (or, the classic “I love you” which is great, but makes you feel guilty for being upset at the nagging 😉

3 – They won’t eat unless the food being served is EXACTLY how it is typically served to them. “This looks different” is the common reaction.

4- They expect you to read their minds. Even though they wanted their pizza slice cut up the last time, this time they wanted to eat it whole, so when you serve it in pieces (having not read their mind) they lose it.

5- When they want to do things themselves (get on their own clothes/shoes, pour their own milk, climb into the car seat) it’s always when you need to get out the door quickly or are running late.

6 – When one parent is sitting 1 foot away, and the other parent is further away, they will ask the parent who is further away to pass them something/get them something that is actually closer to the other parent.

7 – They will guarantee a delayed/abnormally difficult bed time routine when you are trying to get them to sleep because you have plans. (How do they always know?!)

8 – If they don’t finish their snack/food right away and leave it, they will eventually (2 hours later) come back looking for it. When they discovered you ate it or cleaned it up, they demand their piece of food back.

9- Potty talk is the most hilarious thing in a kids’ world and they take every opportunity to say potty words. Ok, wait, I kinda understand this one – farting is funny.

10- Why no matter what they do we love them more than anything in the world (ok, we don’t ask ‘why’ too often when it comes to loving them. We know. They stole our hearts long ago).

My toddler is hilarious. She has a sense of humour, and is sweet and knows how to smile at just the right time when asking for something.

But one of the things she doesn’t like are adjectives. Sound strange? It’s true.

My son has always been used to the gazillion nicknames and pet names we use for him. Versions of his name, rhyming words with his name, plus babe, dear, sweetie pie, monkey, etc.

My daughter on the other hand has taken to not liking certain adjectives. She has accepted the couple of nicknames we’ve given her, those don’t seem to be the problems, but the adjectives become an issue.

For example “Goodnight, baby girl”.

Her: “I not a baby!”

Us: “Goodnight, sweet girl”

Her: “I not sweet!”

Erm ok. So then we have to just call her ‘girl’. Is she forcing us to say her name normally? 😉

It’s pretty funny. Because no matter how casually we drop the words “come on monkey, let’s head upstairs” she has a reply: “I not a monkey!”. Apparently, she takes these names literally.

It’s just one of the cute quirks she has that makes us smile.

But what she doesn’t realize is while she may not like it when I call her ‘baby girl’. She always will be my baby girl.

Do your kids react like these when you use nicknames or adjectives in front of their name?

Looking for some extra quiet time? We set up a library and the kids loved it!! I something like this on No Time for Flash Cards, one of my favourite blogs, and knew the kids would enjoy it.

1) Using blank cue cards, or pieces of construction paper cut into card size, have the kids decorate them as they want. My son wrote his name on his too.

2) In a quiet area, set up the library. I put up a sign, a little reading chair, and set books out. (My son was quick to point out that I didn’t have a selection of French books so I had to fix that. Mr. French Immersion now)

3) The kids select their books and I acted as librarian. Each time they took out a book, I stamped their library card. They would sit quietly, read, and return the book for a new one.

4) Eventually, they wanted a turn being the librarian so they could stamp too.

There is a lot of see, a lot of questions to ask and many things to touch and feel.

The new renovations make the museum an outstanding site to see. There are plenty of stairs, but elevators to help with strollers, wheelchairs and those who may have trouble walking the stairs.

There are quiet rooms for breaks, including nursing. There is a cafe available, however, we haven’t used it. You can bring your own food but have to eat it in the designated food area.

Be prepared to spend a lot of time, each level takes a while to complete and that’s a good thing! There are areas where children can play and spend extra imagination time. You will leave there hearing loads of questions and comments about the amazing things they see.

Welcome to a new series that I am excited to announce on A Little Bit of Momsense. Momstown Monday will feature a post written by Ann-Marie Burton from the popular Momstown.ca website. Momstown.ca offers parents a great way to connect, learn and share. Check them out online or on Facebook and keep your eyes open for more Momstown Mondays!

The independent playdate. It’s a milestone worth noting. After years of mom tagging along to group playdates or playgroups that were really a coffee date for mommy, it’s time for your child to go on her first solo play. And in turn, you need to reciprocate (the unwritten law in playdate land!).

What age do solo-play dates begin? Often around 4 years old (sometimes earlier or later depending on the child, or mommy!). If they haven’t started by kindergarten the solo birthday parties are going to be wringing hand events for mama – so best to get started practising!

To some moms playdates come as second nature. Others, not so much. Here are some tips as you jump into this new playdate pool.

Start with a friend your child already knows very well.

Chose a friend you see regularly like a neighbour. That tends to avoid any personality issues and keeps the first few playdates fun and relaxed.

Short & sweet

An hour is a good amount of time to start out with a new friend or for a younger child. As they age, 2- 2.5 hours is a good chunk of time to play well but avoid the dreaded overexposure!

Use the playdate as a way to support new friendships.

My child has a friend she met in dance class and she’s become a great playdate pal. It’s given my child another stream of friendship outside of school which I really like.

Pick a happy, well rested time of day.

We need cooperative kids who are in good spirits with good sharing skills! If they still nap, don’t plan an afternoon gathering, just sayin’.

Pair up with a mom with older kids

Find a friend with older sibs to show you the ropes. A mom who’s been around the playdate block will be more than happy to drop her child off (been there, done that) and your child can practise more one-on-one play under your supervision. She’ll likely be a much more relaxed playdate partner too, be ready for that when your child visits her house.

How much to supervise?

The whole point of a playdate is to get children used to socialising on their own but kids who are 3 and 4 still need guidance in their play and help to develop their social skills. Even older kids need a host nearby. My daughter (almost 6) can’t wait to escape to her room with a friend and while I support that independence, I stay within earshot so they don’t get into trouble (a friend can be twice the fun but twice the trouble!).

Develop a little theme

Kids love to look forward to a special days so why not give their playdate a “theme”. It sets a basic structure about what they’re going to do together and gives the playdate a bit more fun that “just playing”.

Easy examples:

Playdough & Popcorn date

Backyard Water fun

Train Date – bring your trains for a “Thomas Day”

Indoor Beach Party – wear a bathing suit under your clothes

Dance Party – turn up the tunes!

Tea party – play dress up & have tea

Prep for siblings

Always disappointing not to be included in something and siblings (especially younger!) will not understand the exclusion. Our house rule is if you play in your room with your friend, you can have alone time. But if you play anywhere else, you need to include other siblings as we are a family. I explain this to our little guests too as “the way we play here”.

Emergency Details

Get cell phone numbers and confirm allergies. As a mom of a child with a peanut allergy I’m so grateful to other parents for taking precautions at snack time and I always leave an epi-pen (with instructions).

When in doubt – Craft!

Kids getting restless? Pull out the craft supplies or even basic crayons and colouring books and listen to the hilarious chitter chatter between kids as they create! Send your guest home with her artwork as proof of a fun time together.

Follow Up

Kids have big ears and hear you say “let’s do this again” to the other parent. If they don’t reciprocate (some parents won’t as hosting is not their thing and they don’t get the “rule”) don’t punish your child or her friend, instead invite the friend over again and have fun at your house.

Enjoy! Have a great playdate!

Ann-Marie Burton is the founding owner of momstown Inc and passionate about connecting community moms. momstown.ca is a Canadian network of influencers and bloggers with real life neighbourhood connections which coordinates over 400 events monthly for moms and tots in its 18 local chapters. As a mom of 3 young kids, Ann-Marie considers herself a bit of a crafty mom and defaults to craft-time when there’s a lull in any playdate. You can find her blogging about craft ideas, parenting & meal ideas for families at http://www.momstown.ca or follow her on Twitter @momstownca

Welcome to A Little Bit of Momsense! My name is Rebecca and I'm chatting about parenting, family friendly activities, yummy recipes, family travel, and living a life full of love and laughter. Thanks for stopping by!