Fighting wildfires takes toll on families at home

Roy and Robyn Gogue, of Menifee, have been married six years. Roy has been a firefighter with Cal Fire for four. He will miss his twin daughters' first day of kindergarten on Monday, Aug. 15, because he is fighting the Soberanes brush fire in Monterey County.

Robyn Gogue will take her twin 5-year-old daughters to their first day of kindergarten next week in Menifee.

Her husband, Roy, a Cal Fire firefighter, isn’t able to attend the milestone moment.

“I know he's upset that he will miss another first in their lives,” Robyn Gogue said.

Corona firefighter John Deyoe was looking forward to a dinner date with his daughters and girlfriend, whom he hadn’t seen in 10 days, but he had to cancel because of a last-minute work assignment.

“My heart dropped to my feet. It was like somebody punched me in the stomach,” Deyoe said.

Such is the life of Southern California firefighter families at the height of the wildfire season, where one spouse – in most cases the husband and father – is off battling the flames, hopping from conflagration to conflagration, and the other is home alone for weeks at a time, mixing work, child care, bill paying and worrying.

Therefore, firefighter families say, it’s important to write down plans in pencil, not pen, and to make the most of the time they have together.

Most municipal fire agencies allow their crews to be out for 14 days. Cal Fire crews can be extended to 21 days or more. A Riverside city crew fought the Sand fire in Santa Clarita, then the Pilot fire in the San Bernardino Mountains. Murrieta sent an engine from the Sand fire to the Soberanes fire in Monterey County and then to the Pilot. Long Beach sent 21 firefighters from the Soberanes to the Goose near Fresno. Just as a Los Angeles County engine fresh off the Soberanes rolled into a station in Duarte, it was dispatched to the Pilot.

And when an Orange County Fire Authority crew maxed out on its 14 days on the Soberanes, a bus with fresh replacements from OC showed up.

“You’re married to a firefighter, and there are things you have to accept,” said Kim Oakley, whose husband, Mark, is a battalion chief for Cal Fire/Riverside County Fire Department in Indio. She cares for their four children, including one who is autistic. Mark’s absence, she said, “takes a toll for sure.”

And then there are the firefighters who staff the stations in others’ absence. In Cal Fire, those crews work three days in a row and have four days off. But if there aren’t enough firefighters available, those three days can turn into seven. Those extended shifts, as well as their pay, are a source of contention for Cal Fire crews, who are planning a protest rally on Aug. 22 at the state Capitol.

Nevertheless, no firefighters interviewed for this story appeared ready to quit.

“I think it’s the best job in the world,” Deyoe said.

MAKING IT WORK

Wildfires are often fought in rural environments where cell and internet reception is spotty or non-existent, making communications with the homefront difficult.

Deyoe had just regained a cell signal and was nearing home after a long ride when his battalion chief radioed that the engine crew had been redirected to the Pilot fire. Deyoe called in the bad news.

“That night was the most difficult night of my career,” said Deyoe, an 18-year veteran. His children were upset, “but they’ve lived their whole lives as fireman’s kids, so they know.”

Robyn Gogue plans to videotape her daughters’ school debut Monday. If she can’t connect with her husband via Facetime, she’ll send videos by email or text message. Roy will text her when he’s off the fire line. “I just need to know he’s OK,“ his wife said.

Robyn is a full-time student, studying to be a nurse. Her mom occasionally provides free babysitting. When Roy is home, he sleeps the first day, and then the family goes out for frozen yogurt. The next day, Robyn and Roy will put away their cell phones and enjoy quiet time together in the back yard.

Danny Cook, a Cal Fire firefighter based in Lake Elsinore, drove eight hours to get home from the Sobaranes fire on Sunday to rejoin his wife, Jessie, who is 37 weeks pregnant with their second child. They’ve been married for six years and together for 10. He said when he’s gone he talks with her or texts her, as much as the terrain allows.

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