11.14.2011

Monday "Memories" With My Mom

Well, I think I took a couple of weeks off from my mom posts. Partially because no news is good news. For the most part, I am still pleased with how well my mom is adapting to her new place and routine. That said, make no mistake, there is still plenty of confusion and other health issues to go along with it. My mom's sense of time is virtually gone. On a good day, she may know the season, but not the day, week, month, or hour. Often if I talk to her around 3pm she will say she just got back from breakfast and chair exercises. Well, breakfast ends at 9am and chair exercises are at 10am. However, she may have recently returned from lunch. In the past she had a "day clock" that her friend Sue loaned to us. Although she benefited from it for a short while, the truth is it is no longer of use since she did not "remember" to use it. We have hung calendars in her place and we try to cross of the days each time we are there. However, as you will see from the picture below, this is what happens when you do not have sense of time, yet are trying to keep track on your own. She crossed off pretty much the rest of the year, 2011. I can usually tell who has called her, as she scribbles notes near the phone trying to keep track of phone numbers and addresses. She collects cups, place mats, and anything else she is allowed to take from the dining room.......... For the past several weeks, she has been anxiously thinking that Thanksgiving is in the next day or so. Initially, she thought my family was going to Cleveland for Thanksgiving. We have not been there for a holiday since the mid 1990s. Finally, we got her to understand she is coming to my house for Thanksgiving and so now she always asks me when we are picking her up. We have left notes in her apartment..."Thanksgiving is 10 Days Away" etc..., but it does not seem to help much. She has set out her outfit to wear on Thanksgiving weeks ago. It is a coordinated sweat suit. I guess it's all good since we are normally pretty casual around here. On a lighter note, I brought a sombrero and poncho over to her in case she felt like "dressing up" for Halloween. The aide told me that when she picked my mom up for breakfast that morning, she already had her sombrero and poncho on. Wish I had a picture of that! Also, my brother's birthday is on Halloween and she reminded me several times to send him a card for his birthday, which I did. For the most part, I have given up on doing cards on her behalf. I tried to do it for about a year because I know it is important to my mom, but it became too much trying to get her to sign them and sending them out. If she knew she made a mistake she would want to get white out and it was just too much. However, I know she appreciates the cards she has received from friends and relatives since it is really the only mail she gets as I have her bills and other mail being sent directly to me. My mom has also been attending church in the small chapel they have at American House. She seems to enjoy it and I am glad for that. Then on Sunday morning, I got another reality check. The aide from the Med Team called me at 8am to let me know my mom kind of froze up when she was giving morning pills to my mom. She then took her blood pressure which was something like 200/94 and her pulse oxygen level was at 90. My mom has a form of epilepsy that causes occasional mini seizures. It is likely a result of the cranial infarct she had after her stroke in the mid 80s. She is on two medications to try to limit their occurrences, but they do occasionally happen. She does not remember when they happen and is usually okay shortly afterward. She continued on to breakfast like normal, but I felt bad for the aide who was not aware of her seizures. I talked to my mom on the phone and she was fine and my brother was going over there and said she was fine. It is scary though. So, as I have indicated before, a lot will be based on the number of calls I receive from the Med Team. I think I went about 5 weeks without a call...not bad. I know that this last bit of independence that my mom has is the best thing for her right now...oh, and regaining some of my independence isn't so bad either!

My attempt at giving her some sense of time...

We tried to mark her calendar off with permanent marker, but then she marked off the whole month (and then some)...

In fact, she had crossed off most of the days of the rest of the year.

Megan had labeled each door in her apartment when she moved in.

This is the only place I've let her clutter get a little out of control, her master bath counter...

notice how she keeps all of those pill cups and disposable cups from her medication. I threw them out...

You don't see my mom in the kitchen much these days...notice we removed the knobs off her stove.

I love this post! You did good and I love love the last picture! Maintaining independence is a good thing, well, until it's not. You are in the sam place as lots of folks who are trying to decide... is this still a good thing? When you make your Mom laugh.. isn't that the best?

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ABOUT ME

Thanks for stopping by...I'm Cindy, living in the Midwest, married to George (22 years). Along the way we've had three great kids, Megan (17), Jacob and Kristin (twins,15). We also have the world's cutest Goldendoodle named "Lucky". On Mondays I post about my experiences as a daughter/caregiver to my mom who suffers from Alzheimer's Disease. I love to tell stories about every day life...I add my own sarcastic/humorous twist to a lot of it. I hope you will feel free to check in with me as we Live, Laugh and Love our lives!