As their parents battle through a nasty divorce that may or may not be because Papa Joe has been gay this whole time (It was.), rumors were circulating that Jessica and Ashlee were choosing sides and not speaking to each other. Except here’s the two of them promoting Jessica’s new clothing line together, so clearly they both sided with whichever parent said, “Would y’all quit mopin’ around like flaccid penises and sell clothes to fat ishes! I want to look like Ellen.” God only knows which one that was.