Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Seriously! Lately I've been hearing this: "Oh, you're Olga! I see you everywhere!". Even kids point at me on the street. I've arrived! And being an Aries this does not hurt my ego. LOL! We'll discuss this later.

Let's start with an official (well, I think it is) definition of celebrity from wiki(I can always count on you):

"A celebrity is a person who has a prominent profile and commands a great degree of public fascination and influence in day-to-day media. The term is synonymous with wealth (commonly denoted as a person with fame and fortune), implied with great popular appeal, prominence in a particular field, and is easily recognized by the general public."

This seems to be pretty self explanatory. But of course I have few things to add.

Let's start from the beginning. We all know who the celebrities are and know of them (unless of course you live in the deep forest, but then you will not be reading this). There are many different types and sizes (I'm mostly referring to their egos) of celebrities. Should we look at few? Ok, how about these outstanding samples that have changed the world and our lives:

Oprah Winfrey:
- known around the world
- richest African-American of the 20th century
- big personality
- HUGE giver

Mariah Carey:
- known around the world
- HUGE diva (she is a fellow Aries after all)
- big giver but mostly known for dramas

Bill Gates:
- known around the world (would you actually recognize him on the street)
- do not hear much about him unless you follow his adventures or ventures
- HUGE giver

I am sure my readers know all three mentioned above. Theses people have a HUGE influence on the world, people around them and people that follow them. This is the ultimate celebrity status!

My question is what about us, little celebrities. You know, those people that are known in the community due to their work with public. People like local TV personalities, local politicians and yes, local Real Estate Representatives. We do not have the HUGE wealth but have the following and some of us have HUGE personalities.

What about influence and difference. Could what we do effect our followers? Could what we do inspire people? Could what we do help? Absolutely! But (and this one is BIG but) it all depends on what we do and how we are perceived.

With the arrival of reality TV and YouTube there are many regular people that became celebrities overnight. Kim Kardashian or Honey Boo Boo anyone? How did they become celebrities? Sex tape and glitz redneck pageant child. Can this influence anyone? Well, apparently so, since Kim and the family are racking in millions from their expanded businesses and Honey Boo Boo (I still find it hard to believe I know who she is) is a guest on multiple talk shows (even CNN) and "appears" on SNL (that was soooo good!).

Yes, they are famous. But what is the message they're sending out? We get our messages through media and these personalities are part of it. So, there has got to be some message?! Could it be Kardashian's ignorance about everything beyond the walls of their fame or Honey Boo Boo's family life style with redneck games and "shopping" in garbage containers? Harsh words? Could not resist in this case.

We hear stories of the well known people rehearsing acceptance speeches in front of the mirror while they were kids; or living hockey from the young age to be the star of NHL; or as a child, interviewing stuffed animals in your room to become a well-known journalist.

But these people had it in them from the early age, they were meant to be. And most of them knew that celebrity status comes with a big responsibility of influence and a message. They say a word and people will listen. These people make a positive difference in our lives and lives of many around the world.

What scares me, is the new reality TV stars' celebrity status. It seems to be the ultimate desire for many to be famous. But in their mind, responsibility does not come with the status. The attitude seems to be - do whatever you can to attract more attention and who cares about the consequences. Well, at least that's how I see it.

Yes, there are exemptions, just look at these "Presidential Candidates". They'll be looking for your vote in 2040! Positive message for kids? I think so!

Now, going back to my Aries comment earlier, here is something you might know about me. As long as I remember myself I wanted to be a star. Superstar if you wish! I remember always being at the front of the crowd and loving to be a center of attention (very typical for a person that was born under the sign of Aries). Even my family encouraged that, they used to put me on a chair when I was 3 and ask me following: "Who is the princess? Who is the beauty?". LOL! You can guess the response. Oh, and any party or birthday celebration always included a concert by one and only, sincerely yours. There was even a time in the Pioneer camp talent show that I sang a whole Opera by myself representing all of the characters (well, I was behind the curtain since I could not split myself in five so all five characters can appear on stage at the same time). What happened to all that talent? Oh, it's still here, just hiding. Waiting for the right opportunity. Hmmmm.....
Never mind, back to my point! Still, from that time I knew that I had a responsibility to influence, to lead, to inspire by a positive example. It was installed in me by my family. And as I grew older and my ideas became more mature so did the ideas about responsibility.

Yes, I've accomplished a status of local celebrity. I am proud to say that this status seems to make a difference. People support my ideas and my work. And it feels great!
Current Woman is part of me, part of my world. It's been with me for a long time and is just starting to spread it's wings. It has BIG plans and hopes to accomplish many things that will change many lives for better.

So help me to spread the word of positive influence of Celebrity Status. Let's make sure that we, our friends and families, anyone we know understand the difference between celebrity status and their representation. And if you're a celebrity, lead by a positive example!

Thank you for listening to this rant. These are my opinions as a person and as Current Woman.

I would love to hear what you have to say about my ideas. Negative or positive, I listen to all!

Saturday, September 1, 2012

It's been a veeeeeeery long time! It's been challenging and interesting time off from the blogging stratosphere. But it's time to get back and share what I've learned.

Since I've missed you all so much, I though the best way to return is to talk about LOVE. More specifically, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. This is especially important connection with my last post - The "D" Word.

Here is what wiki's definition of unconditional love : "Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, complete love, or "mother's love."

"Mother's love" is the first idea that comes to mind. It's been experienced by all of us, all of us were kids. As a Mom, I can also attest to that and aware that I am not the only one. Right Moms?

You must know what I am talking about. No wrong could come from you for your Mom. No matter what you did, no matter how bad you messed up, no matter how far you are, no matter if you have not spoken for a while, you know she loves you and always will. This is what Moms do. You‘ll always have their love.

Just looking at my Mom and thinking of what my brother and I have put her through (well I was not that bad ;)), I cannot thank her enough every time we speak. And every time I deal with my son I try to remember what my Mom did with me in one situation or the other. My son, well I tell him that I love him every single day. He really needs to know that right now.

But what about the rest: true altruism and complete love. Have you ever experienced any of these loves? Have you ever given either to anyone?

Well, I am a lucky girl and belong to the group of people that experienced both.

My fantastic family and friends have been there for me through all of my challenges. I came to Canada and left my family behind. What helped me is my outgoing, sunshine personality. I‘ve met some fabulous people in my last 17 years in Canada. They became my friends and family. Yes, some years were really tough and at times I simply did not know how am I going to make it. But my friends were there to help me and at times to guide me. And I know it was true altruism if you wish. I was a stranger to them at some point.
Let's consider another definition - complete love. I believe complete love is a type of love between two people that are romantically involved. Of course there has to be romance and passion for people in love. But we all know those feelings subside somewhat after you've been together for sometime. And what's left is love that should take you through the rest of it all. I am talking about all the challenges of the relationship. Can you handle that?

It is great to be on receiving side of love but my question today is, can you be the provider? Ok, you might not have a child but what about the other two types of unconditional love? Do you have it in you? Do you have enough love to share and get nothing in return?

We all need love in our lives. It's tough to believe that there are still many people in the world that do not get any love. Most of the time it's not their fault: abandoned child, forgotten senior, person down on it's luck. These people don't ask for much, just someone to show them that they're loved and matter.
So, please think about it and consider sharing. It does not take much time or money. There are many ways to do it: volunteer at food cupboards, share your time with children and seniors that are alone, donate to the cause of your choice.

With all the love that I receive of course I try to share. As you can imagine, women's issues receive my utmost attention. But here is another way that I share - Kiva. It's been introduced to me by a friend and I have not looked back. So far, I have been able to put a smile on the faces of ten people around the world. Cannot wait to extend my reach! Are you with me?

It will be great to know of your thoughts about unconditional love. I would also love to hear your stories of sharing love. In the meantime,

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

I am not talking about myself, although it's nice to get back to writing. It is the "D` word that will be center of `the attention today. She is "Dreaming" you might think? No, unfortunately today's "D" word is DEPRESSION.
This word is dark, lonely, scary and very disturbing. It hunts people all over the world and some of them don't even realize it. It affects old, middle aged and young. And this is a second time in my life that this word is visiting my family. The most precious person in my life, my son, has confirmed my biggest fear. My son is depressed and has been for the last four years.

Where was I? Where were my eyes, ears and my mind? How come I did not see this? How come I did not ask THE question?

I have been beating myself up for sometime now. I am just realizing that it is tough to be a parent and I am extremely grateful to my Mom and Dad! It is difficult to look back and try to find that misstep, that wrong door that you opened, that wrong turn that you took. I blame myself for my son's current condition. I am his Mom after all! I am the only parent he has left! I am suppose to be guiding him, helping him, be there for him! Where was I?

We've been through this before. But not with my son, my son's Dad. He struggled for years without success and eventually his body gave up. This happened almost four years ago. My family learned the hard lesson and my biggest fear was that depression might return.
But what is depression? Here is the definition from Wikipedia: Depression is a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person's thoughts, behaviour, feelings and physical well- being. Most of the people get affected by depression at least once in their lives. The big difference is the severity and length of this illness.

Depression could be caused by a significant event in your life, certain medical condition, could be side effect to some medications or simply by a mental illness. Depression affects teenagers in a different way than it does adults. Teenager's brain is still developing. That's why you have to be very careful with the treatment. We are not quite there yet, we are still trying to talk things out. But here are few things that I found very helpful:

- Listen to your teenager. I emphasized on that before in my post "Are They Even Listening?". My sunny optimistic personality is not something that my son can handle right now. Although I have a very optimistic response to every negative statement from him, it's better just to hear what he has to say.
- Be supportive and non judgemental. They are suffering already, please do not add more negativity and misery to their lives.
- Be there for them but do not over do it. Tell them that you are there if they need to talk. Most importantly tell them that you love them. But please do not overwhelm them with your attention. They also need quite time to figure things out.
- Offer help and be persistent. Not all depressions are the same. Some are mild and some are quite deep and require serious medical attention. Be persistent on getting a professional help, even if the teenager has a mild case.
- Encourage activities but don't be too pushy. As adults, we know that physical activities are great for fighting depression. Encourage your child to continue with their regular physical activities. But if the going gets tough, back off. Do not push too hard, it can create more problems.
- Mental health vs marks. School is tough, especially in grade 12. There are plenty of worries about marks and future in particular. But if there is no stability in mind, there is no future, Take care of the head first!

That's all I discovered at this time. I'll be happy to share more when I learn it, find it or create it. But there is just one question that I cannot get out of my head. Why are so many kids depressed?
While talking to my Mom, who still lives in Russia, she suggested that there are many teenagers that are depressed. When I was growing up in Russia, I never heard the word depression. I am sure many adults and kids had the illness but never knew what it was. We had good days and bad days. We just dealt with it all. But these days many young lives are lost. Does that have to do with the world development and mounting pressure on our young generation? Is it because there is so much talk about depression in adolescents and you almost have to have it to fit? Is it our oh so open democratic society that allows our children to be exposed to more than they can handle?

Whatever it is, it's an epidemic and it is very scary! I know that there is not one solution and at times there is no solution but the way to cope. But can we do something to help our future generation?

Please let me know about your thoughts, your experiences and your suggestions. There are many people out there that can use our knowledge and realize that they are not alone.