Wednesday, November 18, 2015

Writing About Vomit AGAIN

Three things I learned last night:

1. I have super vomit hearing. The moment a child of mine begins to hurl, I pop wide awake, even from a dead sleep. No baby should have to puke without the comforting presence of a parent to hold them, so I instantly wake up and then I immediately elbow Tony in the ribs so he runs to the sick child. Tony was barfed on three times last night, I wasn’t barfed on at all, so I think that makes this a superpower.

2. Freddie doesn’t chew his food. The first bout of stomach upheaval reminded all of us that we had chili for dinner and had me and Tony picking up whole beans from the floor and out of the bathtub (the bathtub is a convenient place to hold a puking child). Granted, Freddie doesn’t have many teeth, but I thought for sure that he gummed more of his bites than that.

3. Buster values his sleep. Not even the nearby chunks of baby vomit or the frantic activity of two parents waving their hands over a sick baby will get that dog to move from his convenient sleeping spot in the middle of the hall. He snorted at us a few times, though, obviously perturbed by the activity.