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Tuesday, August 3, 2010

All I Want Is to Get Married and Have Lots of Babies, but Not Really That Many Because OUCH

It's day three of BEDA, and I don't know what to talk about! So I'll just revert to the one thing that I can ALWAYS talk about: marriage.

I told you yesterday that my friend Jenna just got engaged. Well, I got to meet her fiancé today, and he is absolutely PERFECT for her. I honestly don't think there is a better match out there, and I am SUPER excited for them.

As for me... well, this might get a little whiney*. Sorry.

See, I always figured I would be married by now. Or at least close to getting married. When I was in middle school I was sure I would get married right after I graduated high school. When I realized that that was a somewhat unrealistic timeframe, I figured that I would get married during college. That was FOUR MORE YEARS that I had to find someone and fall in love and all that fun stuff. But, here I am, about to start my senior year of college, and guess what? I haven't been on a date since high school.

The problem is, I'm not really interested in any of the guys that I know in Flagstaff. Or if I am interested, they're already taken. So, I'm kinda out of luck. There are a couple guys in my life who I would be happy to marry, but one is very strong in his faith and neither of us wants to marry outside of our own religion, and the other is on a mission and probably has no idea that I'm even interested. I guess we'll see what happens when he gets home in a few months. Maybe I'll get lucky and he'll want to date me. Who knows?

I guess I just need to continue being patient. I honestly like the life I have now. If it turned out that I stayed single for several more years, I would be okay with that. But REALLY, I just want to get married and start my family. I'm ready.

Until tomorrow, best wishes!

*Whiney? Whingey? I never know which one to use... Maybe the one with the "g" is British or something?

Enjoy life now while you can :) As much as you feel like you want marriage and babies now, if you were to actually get it right now, you would probably find yourself incredibly unhappy with it because it won't even come close to the 'vision' you have of it in your head. Get caught up in the things you love, the things you are really passionate about and about the point in time you wake up every day with a smile on your face because you love what you have to look forward to, THEN love will find you :) Also, don't put limits on 'the one'. Date anyone who's interested in you (well, creepy/scary/potentially dangerous people excepted), even if they fit only a few, or none of your list of requirements (c'mon, anyone who says they don't have a list is a liar lol!) I thought what I wanted most was to be a wife and stay at home mom and planned my life figuring that was what my life was going to be and the time until them didn't really matter. I got what I wanted, and now see how much that time before DID matter; how much I wasted and how much my kids are missing out on because I tried to force the Lord's time table. You know that thing about 'righteous desires' being fulfilled when you do things the Lord's way? Yeah, put that one to the test, got what I asked for and have spent the last 7 years learning why the Lord kept telling me no. You'd think I would have learned my lesson, it was a perfect lost Book of Lehi scenario. I am eternally stuck with the consequences of trying to get the Lord to do things my way. I pray every day that my kids won't be permanently damaged (spiritually or emotionally) from massive mistake.

Anyway, take it as a cautionary tale :) You my dear are an awesome person with a lot to offer those around you. Keep putting all that ability into bettering the world around you and eventually marriage and babies will find their way in. Most of the very best moms I know didn't get started until later in life. Parenting and marriage are one of those things where previous life experience can't be over valued. Don't lose hope, its gonna be one heck of a party when it finally happens for you ♥

Life doesn't always work out the way that we plan... A good lesson I learned from "While You Were Sleeping". Thank goodness that most the time it works out better than we could have planned for ourselves. I know you must hear this from countless people, but I think you will meet your Mister Right and he will TOTALLY be worth the wait! Don't worry that you haven't dated much. Luckily, there isn't a rule that "you have to have gone on ___ dates before you can meet your future spouse" lol. Enjoy every step in the journey! Each part of life can be great! There are different aspects of each time in our life that make it so. Always keep in mind what you want in your future husband and don't settle! You deserve someone amazing Allison! It just may not be the right time yet. My mom once told me, "You have the rest of your life to be married" and might I add eternity. That helped me not feel pressure to find my eternal companion. Keep your chin up! I know it can be difficult not to think about... especially with those around you getting engaged and pregnant and what-not. =) I hope that I can see ya soon! Flagstaff is awfully quiet during the summer.