Two Weeks Of Text Messages for a Broken Hearted Friend

Updated on July 7, 2010

I’ve always found that I can get through almost anything as long as my teeth don’t hurt…or my feet. I guess that’s why hoof and mouth disease is so horrible. But while the above are annoying, nothing is worse than a bad relationship. I don’t care if it’s with a lover, a brother, a mother or a hairstylist. When your relationship is in trouble you not only feel awful you’re awful to be around. If you live close to a friend who is going through rough relationship times you can take them out and get them drunk, or take them out and get them sober but if you live in a different state you just don’t have those options. While you should never take any sides when a friend’s relationship is having problems (your luck the one time you take a stand and tell your friend they’re with a real shmuck, they’ll get back together with them and then you’re screwed) when a friend of mine was going through some relationship rockiness I devised a two week plan of daily texts for a broken hearted friend. Feel free to use these with your friends (changing the pronouns as needed). I guess I SHOULD have written for Hallmark after all! Disclaimer: I’m not a therapist I just play one on the Internet.

Day One

- I want you to make a list every day of the wonderful things about you. It’s too easy to turn in on yourself when something like this happens. I’ll start you off – you are smart, loving, intuitive and a wonderful friend…now you…

Day Two

- Shakespeare – “To thine ownself be true, and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”

Day Three

- From the musical “Wicked” – “Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better? But because I knew you I have been changed for good.”

Day Four

- Whatever happens try to remember the good things the two of you have shared – doesn’t mean you have to go back just means you should celebrate what good came before and how it helped you discover what you want and need now

Day Five

- Woody Allen – “To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to love. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you’re getting all of this down.”

Day Six

- When you look in the eyes of someone you truly love and who loves you back, you should always see a reflection of yourself as an even better person than even you think you are or could be – you should never feel “less than” when you look in his eyes.

Day Seven

- Love isn’t just about sex all the time but sometimes it just is and those are some really good times

Day Eight

- Your self esteem shouldn’t be community property

Day Nine

- Know when to shut up and know when to scream

Day Ten

- Sometimes it’s cowardly to walk away but sometimes it’s even more cowardly to stay

Day Eleven

- I have known you for years and you have never NOT been loveable

Day Twelve

- Bad days can always be washed down with the memory of better days from your past and even better days waiting to happen to you

Day Thirteen

- Sometimes even though love seems right on paper, you need what can’t be written down – chemical attraction

Who’s to say what will really help when either you or a pal is going through relationship drama but one thing that I believe these texts did for him is that it let him know that he was not alone, that someone was thinking about him and that he was loved and though we all should know this on our own, sometimes, just sometimes we need a little help from our friends to see our own greatness.

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Comments 6 comments

Some really good advice. I'm always in favor of making lists and debating choices. Good work, Scott!

Earth Angel 6 years ago

You are the BEST Mr. Lean-on-Scott!!

Loved so many of your ideas/choices/reminders!!

I counsel many people, relationship-break-up being the number one topic!! There are just times a text message really is a better choice (for me) than five hours with a sobbing blonde and a Kleenex box!!

Blessings on your day dear friend!! Earth Angel!!

kkalmes 6 years ago

Hello somelikeitscott, you are a hallmark wonder, even I feel better and I don't have any relationships to feel good or bad about.

Paradise7 6 years ago from Upstate New York

Very sensitive to the way your friend is feeling. I give you full marks and believe you've helped.