Monotonous tales and incoherent thoughts of a seething brain…Read at your peril

Xeedho

The Xeedho is a custom usually prevalent in the Northern parts of Somalia. After the wedding is consummated and the bride and groom settle peacefully in their newly constructed home, it is time for opening the Xeedho or as it is called in Somali Xeedho-fur. This usually occurs on the seventh night, – the final night of the seven-day honeymoon period. The roots of Xeedho lie in the pastoral lands with the Somali Nomads. The custom though, is dwindling in the rural areas and has, as of late, taken a great following in the urban areas

Left: The Xeedho. Middle: The veil is uncovered. Right: Naked

In the olden times the villagers would gather outside the hut of the newly weds and the Xeedho-opening ceremony would take place. The gathering in the city does not differ much from that of the villages as all people congregate in a large hall.

The Xeedho, with its gracefully winding shape is designed with the bride in mind. It actually signifies the bride. As the members of both the families gather around in big circles, the Xeedho is placed in the middle and the ceremony begins.

So it must be tended to as if it were the bride herself and as a result, the opening of the Xeedho has fixed rules and regulations, though many of them are no longer practiced by majority of people. The tradition is slowly dying and losing its formal procedures, some of which are:

The Xeedho MUST be opened completely so that the groom can publicly declare the bride as his wife.

The groom cannot partake in the opening of the Xeedho

A male member from the groom’s tribe, usually a close relative such as a cousin, etc. is chosen to open the knots on the Xeedho. First though, he must take the upper veil off, just as he would a new bride in her wedding gown, and then process with the untying of the ropes.

A guard, usually a woman and from the bride’s family, holding a gentle stick stands beside the Xeedho and watches as the man carefully tries to untie the labyrinth of knots. Being one of the few women who spent days and days interweaving the rope on the Xeedho, she knows every opening and every knot.

If the man places his hands on the wrong end of the rope, or tries to open the rope from a different knot, the female guard lightly whips him with her stick. That signifies that he has to change the course of his opening of the rope and find a new lead. This will continue until the Xeedho is opened.

There is nothing wrong if the man finds the opening end of the Xeedho easily and it is opened quickly, though sometimes this might cause a squabble between the female members of the two parties.

There is only one opening of the rope on the Xeedho. This opening is a tiny knot hidden in the maze of ropes. If the man finds the opening, he would simply pull it and it disentangles itself completely – thereby opening the Xeedho.

Several male members from the groom’s family will attempt to open the Xeedho, and all that time, the Guard keeps watch for any mistakes.

If the Xeedho is not opened that night, they congregation returns the following night to try and open it.

The above images show the untying of the ropes on the Xeedho.

If the relatives of the groom fail to open the Xeedho, a great deal of disgrace follows them wherever they go. The bride is (sometimes) repossessed by her family saying that the groom, whose relatives could not open the Xeedho, will not be capable of catering to the needs of the bride. The women engage in verbal scuffles and a war of songs while the men resort to spiteful words of poetry being recited over a course of time. Sometimes even battles between tribes came about as a result of a Xeedho not opened properly or not opened at all.

The two images above reveal the Sati (which the Xeedho is made of) after the removal of the white cloth (Salaq) and the container with the contents.

The white cloth draped around the curvy container is called Salaq. The Xeedho is the complete thing and the outer hard covering that it is contained in is called Sati. Inside the Xeedho is small container with the Subag covered with a thick coating of dates. The dates are mixed with several spices and then ground together to make this chunky substance. It is not just Subag though, but there is also Muqmad/oodkac – small dried meatballs immersed in the Subag. After the successful opening of the Xeedho, its contents I.e. the Subag and Muqmad are distributed among the male members of both families/relatives/attendees. It is customary that the women do not eat from the Xeedho – for them is a special one taken to the girls house which is then distributed accordingly.

Left: The thick mixture of dates and spices is sliced open. Right: Once opened, a rich mixture of Subag and Muqmad lies at the bottom ready to be consumed

17 Responses

“usually occurs on the seventh night, – the final night of the seven-day honeymoon period”

^^^^ sori but i always thought , that it was done on the night of the wedding, as i heard that in the old days that demanded if the groom would take his bride home , as this was to challenge him . i also thought that this was how the northern`s were different from the rest of somali ( southern somali) as the did this tradition , and southern somali only did the seven day honeyman . but then again i could be wrong

thats the real stuff man… what ya’ll youngesters know about that, not to mention- maxay ul dumarkasi ila dhaceen- xadhiga yar aawadi. lol great once again. with your inspiration i’m taking my place back to the roots as well.

Ifka, there is something called Gaaf, which i will explain in another post, that usually occurs from the first night, but I am not sure about the Xeedho on the first night. I will check and get back to you. Also, it wasn’t a way of the Northerns being different from the Southerners, but just that each region has its own local customs – and as you go from region to region, these customs vary greatly.

For example, the Xeedho is not a custom of all Northern Somali regions – it is primarily celebrated in the regions of Waqooyi Galbeed, Awdal, Togdheer, Sool and Sanaag – the last two regions infrequently. In Southern regions it is Shaash-saar/Todoba Bax which has prominence, whereas Bari has Gaaf/Todoba Bax.

Well well well…………….this is also my fav part of the wedding! We sijuis usually do it on the third day!!! Nikaah on the first day, a western style ceremony on a second day and a traditional third day to round things up………third day is my fav expecially when people cant open the damn thing and are asked either to sing or do something equally hilarious!!!! Luv it!

Nice to see young Somalis talking the real Somali culture, customs and traditions. I have seen so many things in Somali territories. I have travelled in all Somali regions and many other countries where Somalis reside nowadays. The thing you call Gaaf/toddoba bax are all the same thing whatever the difference in different areas use to mark the last night for the marriage cermony. Xeedho is as such very interesting, cuz, you know, it represents the bride and when it is opened it show that the bride no longer a girl but rather a lady.
So, my friends please do not misinterpret the wisdom behind the Xeedho and the beautiful Somali custom. Nowadays people do in europe, Asia and North America as well.