Since I’ve become married (and moved into the boring part of my life, as some would say-not necessarily me, but some…), I’ve enjoyed listening to and watching those around me interact with one another in the flirting, dating, marriage stages of their lives, most especially my sister. In the last three months, she has had one friend tell her that he “compares all other girls to her”, another guy consistently write her letters (snail mail people!) while she’s in CO, another tell her that she’s got alot to offer a guy, another drove 8+ hours to tell her that he was in love with her (they’ve never been on a date…), and most recently, a 40-something year old ask her out. She said no. (Phew!) In fact, she’s had to say no to all these guys.

Jealous? I would have loved to be in that situation when I was her age…lots of choices means a better one, right!? This theory makes sense, except that my sister isn’t settling for any of these guys. Frankly, some of them are really cool guys. In one of her recent posts, “Relationships“, her first sentence is, “Dating is a hassle.” I can see where she’s coming from, considering she has so many offers but none of them is really what she’s looking for.

On my end, I met my husband in college, we became good friends, then dated, then married. This happened over the course of my whole college experience, during which I didn’t have anyone else ask me out. I’ve been married now for over 3 years and I feel very lucky to have married such a wonderful man. I know there are some single women out there who wish they were married-or at least on that track-my sister being one of them.

Still, I can’t figure it out. I couldn’t have planned my relationship with Matt if I had tried. It just happened. Relationships are just a mystery-perhaps we don’t realize how much God is really in control of our lives. Perhaps my sister hasn’t found that right guy because that’s not God’s plan for her yet. Maybe right now He wants to bless her as a single person, and right now he’s blessing me as a married person. If someone wanted advice from me about how to meet the right guy, date him, and get married, I don’t think I’d have any advice to offer. Is that something we can orchestrate? God has you where He wants you.

Acts 17:24-27 says, “The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. And He is not served by human hands, as if He needed anything, because He himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. From one man He made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us.”

Besides, even Solomon couldn’t figure out how this whole dating thing worked!**