Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Unless you've ever worked at helpdesk yourself, you shouldn't expect to find these too funny, but I've tried my best to pick the ones that can be funny for normal people. These are actual phone conversations by the way...

Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have? Customer: A white one... -----Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left? -----Male customer: Hello... I can't print. Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ... Customer: Listen pal! don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates damn it! -----I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't see it... -----Customer: I have problems printing in red... Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer? Customer: No. -----Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am? Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket. -----Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7. Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters? -----Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail. Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem? Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around it?

Friday, November 18, 2005

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.All 50 US states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories per hourIt's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.The stomach must produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest itself.Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

If you don't know OpenOffice.org, it is a free but powerful office suit (i.e. like Microsoft Office). I have been using it for over 3 years now and I still favor it over the alternatives for a number of reasons (smaller files, PDF export, etc).

If you're new to OpenOffice.org or office suits in general then you will find these Free OpenOffice.org training videos very useful. The videos are designed for beginners and they will get your up and running in minutes, literally.

Friday, November 11, 2005

According to the history of guitar on the instrument is based on an anciet instrument in Iran.

"Guit" comes from the Sanskrit word "Sangeet" meaning "music" (Sanskrit was the official language of the Aryans), and "tar" is purely Persian and means "chord" or "string" .

In traditional Persian music (still a popular style in Iran) different variations of the instrument exist including the "Tar" and the "Setar" (which means "three chords" but for some reason it has four)!

The Photo: Figurines playing the ancestor of the guitar. Excavated from Susa, Iran, 3rd millennia BC. Iran National Museum. Source: Wikipedia.

Monday, November 07, 2005

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue.A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.A snail can sleep for three years.A cat's urine glows under a black light.A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to deathAn ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

The average American, spends an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).The email these facts (are they really?) were in was pretty long, so: