Home Alone 5: Home A-Stoned

Do you know happens when you mix one guy, an abundance of beer and way to much free time? If you guessed ihateketchup.com than you’re absolutely right!

Too bad you don’t win anything!

I wonder sometimes if I had a wife and kids or even an active interest in sports that aren’t virtual; if I would have time to write this blog. Would I even have time to do most of the things I enjoy doing?

Like tipping cows or paintballing fat people?

I would totally devote my life to the protection and well-being of my family. But up until that time, fuckin’ RAGE!

Right now, I’m living for me. Which is kind of nice, but it has its downside…

If you’ve ever lived on your own or been put in a situation when you spend a lot of time on your own; then you know exactly what I mean.

And for the people, who are loved, think of it this way…

Say your playing NHL 11 (yes, I use video games in a lot of my comparisons) and you just dipsy-dangled 2 defense men, broke the goalies ankles and scored a glorious goal.

Then what?

Are you going to high-five yourself?

Are you going to call your mom up and tell her what you did? She’ll most likely SAY she’s proud of you, like any mom does, but it’s fake…she would probably be actually thinking “When is my son going to give me some fuckin’ grandkids!”

So yes, there are times when you’re alone you have something funny to talk about but no one home…
Man this is one depressing blog…

OK. Time to look on the AWESOME side of leaving on your own…

Remember those mornings when you’re trying to sleep in and your roommate/wife/kids/parents were making a bunch of racket?

I don’t.

There’s also the fact that you have to clean up after yourself and ONLY yourself. If you’ve ever lived with roommates that don’t really pick up after themselves then you know it fuckin sucks!

I’m looking at you Evan and Dave…..

(do they even read my blog?)

ANNNNYWAYS

Yes, there is plenty of upsides to living on your own. Eating what ever you want WHENEVER you want, you can listen to you porn as loud as you want, no one judges you for eating fish sticks 3 nights in a row and the best part of all…

YOU CAN SHIT WITH THE DOOR OPEN!

Ahhhhh, it’s quite the life, ain’t it?

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About cameronchase420

Hey I'm Cameron and I hate Ketchup, obviously. I also like to talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, and rap. I'm from Calgary but lived in Ontario for the most of my life. I now live in a little town called Wingham, oh you haven't heard of Wingham? Strange. Aaaaanyways, enough about me. Go read my shit.
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This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 16th, 2011 at 4:59 pm and posted in Misc., Opinion. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.