It’s your June Twentieth Davey Mac Report, ladies and gentlemen, and in a few moments, we have ourselves a Game 7. And that’s fucking awesome. Truly. As a sports fan, my dick throbs a little when I hear “Game Seven.” It also throbs when I hear the following:

* Titties

* Free Slurpee Day

* Millennium Falcon

* Liberace

* Puppets

* Cute Animals

* Optimus Prime

* Fart Time

I seriously cannot wait for this game to begin. If I had a time machine, I’d get in it and zip myself to ten minutes from now which would bring me to…Jimmy Kimmel Live. Shit. I mistimed my stupid fucking time machine. Being 8:13 PM (Eastern Time), the game isn’t due to tip off for another 47 minutes. I didn’t even get my time machine to the pre-game show with Magic Johnson and Jalen Rose and that white guy who seems to annoy the black guys on the show. I’m now stuck here in Jimmy Kimmel Land!! Oh no, he’s putting one of his relatives in a comedy sketch!! Ahhhhhhhh!!

Anyway, God bless Game 7′s! And God bless America!! And now…

…Back to the future!!

…um. Sorry for this. But I’ve just been told that the previous sentence in italics has been copyrighted. It’s a movie or some shit…I don’t…So, in order to avoid a lawsuit…