Fleabag Friday | Tyrion Lannister & Ser Jorah Mormont

Talking about our gerbils, Ser Jorah Mormont and Tyrion Lannister takes up an unreasonable amount of my time. Colleagues will turn to me and ask how the gerbils are, in the same manner in which they might ask how other people’s children are. And I am more than willing to talk about them and show people the pictures on my phone like the most irritating of all parents.

Ser Jorah Mormont

Like any parents we like to buy our ‘children’ treats. Gerbils are tiny little creatures and have a diet which involves gerbil museli which you can buy from any pet store. They are also allowed a whole variety of ‘human’ foods, special rodent treats, nuts and seeds - as long as they are in moderation.

Tyrion Lannister

A quick browse of the pet aisle of your local supermarket or local pet shop will uncover a wealth of gerbil-friendly treats. From fruit sticks to gerbil-friendly chocolate drops*, from brazil nuts to alfalfa treats, you name it, you can find it. Honestly Ser Jorah’s and Tyrion’s favourite treat is the humble pumpkin seed. They would walk over hot coals for one of those bad boys and they would certainly walk over each other to get one.

This weekend I was having a tidying binge and decided to put all the treats that we have picked up recently and all the treats we have been given (people know how much we love our gerbils) and put them in Tupperware. Only then did I realise the full extent of our ‘love’…