My ears are still ringing from Faith No More’s concert in Melbourne last night or the birds outside really have been smoking a lot of weed because their beautiful voices are ruined. I’d been looking forward to this concert for so long and the band did not disappoint. Mike Patton is a genius. His ability to segue back and forth between guttural bleeps and rolling growls to then nail the Bee Gees’ “I Started a Joke” is beyond compare. If Satan had a bar and there was a resident lounge singer helping you to pass away your burning eternity then Patton would be that singer.

The rest of the band was as tight as ever. I always make excuses for bands that lose their “ferocity” as they get older. It is difficult to maintain that anger and venom as one shuffles on through the years. You either don’t care as much or you just don’t have the energy. FNM are still as ferocious as ever, bordering on a primal level of sheer violence. At one point I really felt like smashing someone’s face in for no apparent reason. Good thing I remembered that I am less than six feet, wear glasses and can’t fight or that really could have ended badly.

Highlights of the night: Bogans booing support comedian Neil Hamburger as they completely missed the point. He’s meant to get that reaction you idiots. All you did was fan the fire. Yelling out, “You’re not funny” is just another way of saying, “I’m fucking stupid because I don’t get the joke”. These same bogans have no idea just how funny FNM are either. They may be able to destroy your eardrums with “Surprise! You’re Dead” but don’t for one instance think their cover of mega hit “Easy” is not done with tongue firmly placed in their butt cheeks. It turns out these “fans” believe that irony is what you get the creasies out of your clothesys with.