“I’m very, very depressed,” Tarantino said. “I finished a script, a first draft, and I didn’t mean to shoot it until next winter, a year from now. I gave it to six people, and apparently it’s gotten out today.” He learned that when his longtime agent Mike Simpson began getting phone calls from agents looking to pitch their clients for roles in the ensemble Western…

“I gave it to one of the producers on Django Unchained, Reggie Hudlin, and he let an agent come to his house and read it,” Tarantino said. “That’s a betrayal, but not crippling because the agent didn’t end up with the script. There is an ugly maliciousness to the rest of it. I gave it to three actors: Michael Madsen, Bruce Dern, Tim Roth. The one I know didn’t do this is Tim Roth. One of the others let their agent read it, and that agent has now passed it on to everyone in Hollywood. I don’t know how these f*cking agents work, but I’m not making this next. I’m going to publish it, and that’s it for now. I give it out to six people, and if I can’t trust them to that degree, then I have no desire to make it. I’ll publish it. I’m done. I’ll move on to the next thing. I’ve got 10 more where that came from.”

Well that’s disappointing. I know many are very tired of Tarantino, and he certainly straddles the line between homage and full on rip-off every time his movies hit the press. But I tend to enjoy his films no matter the morals involved. Despite the bad news, this isn’t the end of The Hateful Eight according to Tarantino. There are plans on the horizon. From Indiewire:

“I am not talking out of both sides of my mouth, because I do like the fact that everyone eventually posts it, gets it and reviews it on the net,” Tarantino told Deadline. “Frankly, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I like the fact that people like my shit, and that they go out of their way to find it and read it. But I gave it to six motherfucking people! Starting this week, I’ll be setting meetings with publishers.”

So who’s to blame here? My money is on Michael Madsen, still upset that the rumored Vega brothers movie never came to life after Pulp Fiction. Then again, I don’t really need to see John Travolta in another movie following From Paris With Love. That’s the kind of performance you want to remember above all others.

Knowing Taratino, now he’s going to write a script about 6 guys, one of whom betrays his boss, and now the boss has to hunt them all down until he finds the one who did it. And I bet he also decides to play the role of the mole, because Tarantino.

I agree. I picture him saying “I’m not reading this shit” in his old man voice, then handing it off to his agent for advice on whether he should take the part or not. Madsen’s one of Tarantino’s guys so I don’t see him doing that.

Tarantino needs to go old-school CIA styles with scripts in the future. When you print a limited number of copies, you give each copy a unique discrepency, that way, when a copy is leaked you can easily track it back to the person you gave it to (AND DISAPPEAR THEIR FUCKING ASS!!!).

Bruce Dern wanted to go to a secluded place to read a script given to him by Quentin Tarantino, and to not be bothered by anyone. As he was reading the script perched atop his roof while eating Barnum’s Animal Crackers, a bizarre sound occurred from his neighbor’s house across the street. A foul odor soon followed the peculiar sound and made Dern think aloud, ” smells like they’re cooking a goddamn cat over there.” Alarmed by what was taking place across the street, Dern arose from his squat only to slip on the shingles and tumble down to the ground below him, landing on a pile of dog shit left by the scum-sucking barking rat from down the street, whose ass he will now attempt to staple shut.

Witnessing all the commotion outside was the meatball from next door, Ricky Butler, who comes hurdling over the white picket fence to check on Dern’s condition after the horrific fall from the roof of the house. Clearly shaken up after the fall, Butler tries to calm Dern’s nerves by telling him to relax and sit tight because he called the pizza dude. As Butler surveyed the damage after Dern’s fall he noticed that the window of Dern’s 1989 Trans AM was busted out. Butler approached the car to find a copy of “The Hateful Eight” sitting inside the drivers seat and covered in shattered glass. Realizing that Dern was still concussed, Butler grabs the script from the car thinking it is manifesto for hard eight ball usage.

Butler was recently seen impersonating Michael Jackson, and has been in and out of rehab. He is set to release a new book entitled “The Hateful Eight Western Hookers, and How Smack Ruined My Life.”

Dern is still awaiting a follow-up call from Tarantino. He has been keeping himself busy by planting zinnias with his wife, and constantly harassing his neighbor Ray to “take his balls out of his wife’s purse” and help their other neighbor Art rid the street of the crow problem.

When asked to comment about why he is leaning towards not hiring Dern for his next project, Tarantino replied, ” he (Dern) has left me several obscene messages lately. Something to do with being in a bush and snapping my neck in a heartbeat.”