Self Help Workshop: Step Two

Child Development: How you were Trained to Fail

Your inner child development began immediately upon birth. Everything you learned as a child greatly impacts your beliefs, personality, habits, attitudes and level of success.

In Step One you were exposed to recent scientific brain research and how the deep limbic system of our human brain operates on auto pilot.

If allowed to operate on auto pilot, this non-conscious area of the brain is usually not in harmony with your conscious goals.

I also explained a few simple techniques to help develop mind control. It is imperative to harness the massive power of your subconscious if you have any desire to achieve success.

I am going to expand on this scientific research with information that could be considered philosophical, spiritual or perhaps even esoteric.

You will learn how the subconscious mind is programmed during the early child development years. You will also see that much of this programming was negative in nature and does not support your efforts to achieve success.

I would like you to have a thorough understanding of “why” you are experiencing success blocks.

Only then can I show you “how to” change your reality and achieve the life you choose.

Your current beliefs drive you to do the things you do, think the thoughts you have and experience your emotions.

Parents or primary caregivers programmed your subconscious throughout the child development stage. This programming created the beliefs you have today.

To help get my point across, let’s pretend your mind is similar to a computer.

NOTE: Our brain is in no way similar to a computer – this example is only to help you SEE what I am explaining.

A newborn child (like a new computer) has no programming and no data stored in its memory.

A computer can only operate within the parameters for which it is programmed. A computer cannot perform a function if it is not programmed to do so.

Your mind is similar in that you had no program at birth and your parents (or primary caregivers) then began to program their beliefs throughout the child development years into your subconscious.

Just as it is impossible for a computer to function outside the parameters for which it was programmed, humans are also not capable of accomplishing anything that is outside of their current beliefs (programming).

A computer programmer can however, develop and install a new or updated program to enable the processing of a different function.

Many of us, as the result of the programming we received during our child development years, have the erroneous belief we cannot change our programming.

You can definitely change your beliefs, your personality, your level of success – or anything else you choose to change.

Unless you have already been working to change your beliefs, realize that you did not choose your current beliefs, moral values or personality any more than a computer can choose its operating system.

If you are one of the fortunate few, your parents were programmed throughout their child development years to believe anything is possible. They were trained to believe in their ability to accomplish any goal they choose and passed these beliefs on to you.

On the other hand, most of us have parents who were trained in their early child development years to believe it is necessary to get a good education, work hard and save for a rainy day.

Throughout the child development years our subconscious is continuously being programmed with negative beliefs.

This was accomplished through repetition and by the time we were 4 to 6 years of age (many experts now say it is even much earlier than this) most of our beliefs were set for life - unless we choose to re-program the subconscious.

While learning how you were programmed, realize your parents raised you the best they could with what they knew. There is no reason to be angry or upset with them.

It is more important to realize right now, you have the opportunity to learn how to change. You can be successful in areas such as relationships, health, wealth and personal development.

You are then able to pass your experience and knowledge on to others, especially your children, who also can enjoy an empowering life full of possibilities; instead of fear and worry.

Most of what you believe about money, prosperity, love, health, happiness, etc., is the result of what you accepted as “truth”.

Your caregivers passed their beliefs on to you in the child development years and you accepted them as truth. They became your beliefs which fuel your thoughts, actions, emotions.

This is where the majority of us get stuck. We have negative beliefs and lack of confidence based on what we believe to be true.

During the early child development stage you quickly learned if you made mommy and daddy happy, you were rewarded and if you were “bad” you were punished.

Pretending Life

You also learned to pretend who you were in order to please your parents, teachers and others so you could be accepted, would be good enough and avoid punishment.

Much of your learned childhood behavior is no longer supportive in adult life.

Perhaps you learned if you cried, you got attention or things went your way. Or maybe you became angry and your parents gave in to appease you.

Now, these habits are stored in your memory banks and whenever you are experiencing unpleasant or undesirable situations you resort to your learned responses – tears, anger, raising your voice, or perhaps even stuffing your emotion inside and letting it boil.

One of the main functions of our subconscious brain is to protect us. Everything we see, hear, feel and experience in life is stored in this part of our brain.

Your thoughts create your emotions, affect your health and influence how you respond to everything in life.

You either have empowering thoughts or fear thoughts (which create worry and anxiety).

You have learned how to behave out of “fear”

Fear you will be rejected, and through your own self-judgment, fear that you are not good enough.

Throughout your child development stage, while trying to please others and be accepted, your subconscious brain was trained to operate on auto pilot using punishment and/or reward as the motivating factor in any undertaking.

Your subconscious “judge” decides what is good or bad, right or wrong.

When you do anything that is not in alignment with your judge, self-sabotage takes over and you will keep punishing yourself over and over. (Often this punishment can continue for years and years unless you learn to let it go.)

Even the small, seemingly insignificant issues in the early child development years could play a major role in your decisions today.

Let’s imagine you are five years old. Thinking like a five year old, you can do anything. Your dad is doing some repairs in the home. You are all excited and want to help. Unfortunately, rather than being allowed to help you are scolded and told to go play.

In a child’s mind, unknowingly this could translate into many issues. You are not worthy, not capable, not loved, no good and so on.

Now fast forward to today and you are about to learn some new techniques for self improvement.

This old belief programmed during your early child development years could stop you cold and send the message to your conscious mind “who are you kidding, you can’t do that, you are not good enough, or smart enough, etc.”

Even worse, your non-conscious judge will tell you there is no way any of this information will work for you.

The majority of beliefs stored in your subconscious are lies...

Because your beliefs are stored at the subconscious level, you can consciously be seeking to change and improve your self while your subconscious prefers to keep you exactly where you are now – safe.

Remember, in Step One I explained how your “amygdala” senses any discomfort or anxiety associated with change and will interpret this as danger. It then attempts to stop you from doing whatever is causing the discomfort.

Some programming from your early child development was extremely valuable at that time. Unfortunately as an adult these childhood beliefs are no longer valid and could actually be detrimental to your success.

For example, parents concerned about their child’s safety might repeat over and over “This is a dangerous world we live. It is not safe. Don’t talk to strangers.”

Now imagine that child as an adult, employed in a sales career. How many difficulties do you think this adult will have approaching and talking with (strangers) new prospects?

A lot of difficulty!

Chances are good they experience all kinds of negative emotions such as anxiety and fear.

Only when this old programming has been discovered, accepted, released and new programming installed, will this person then be able to meet new prospects without any fear or anxiety.

Most people tend to mistake their “beliefs” as being the “truth”.

Think about anyone trying to use a computer operating system designed ten years ago. The programming is outdated and the functions would be very limited compared to the new technology of today.

The truth is that you too are operating with a subconscious belief system that is old (very old in fact) and has been passed down from generation to generation dating all the way back to your ancestors.

Hopefully, this helps you to understand regardless of how many books or courses you study regarding self-help, self-improvement, or acquiring wealth, you cannot achieve permanent success without:

Discovering your current belief system (old programming).

Accepting yourself and your current programming with no resistance to the way you are right now.

Releasing any emotional attachment to your old beliefs and habits.

Doing the work to reprogram your subconscious so it operates in harmony with your goals.

The Law of Consciousness (Universal Law) in simple language, this law states that as consciousness expands the space for events increases; therefore your concepts and ideas of good and evil, opportunity and possibilities, past – present – future enlarge to reveal your outstanding needs in this present life.

In other words, the more you awaken and expand your consciousness, the more aware you become of what you need.

Allow me to awaken you. The links below present information to expand your conscious awareness and set you on a path of self-discovery.

Do not allow the mistaken beliefs programmed into your subconscious during the child development years to run your life on auto pilot.

Consciously choose the life you want to live and then reprogram the subconscious to support your choices.

Listed below are additional pages with valuable information to help understand how your subconscious programming during the early child development years affects you today.

To begin your journey of self-discovery, click the links below in the order they are presented.

Your story will appear on a Web page exactly the way you enter it here. You can wrap a word in square brackets to make it appear bold. For example [my story] would show as my story on the Web page containing your story.

TIP: Since most people scan Web pages, include your best thoughts in your first paragraph.