The need for mentors in Cleveland County

Jarquise Ross, 9, gets help on a work sheet from Shelby High School football player Michael Marable at Jefferson Elementary School.

Brittany Randolph

By Jessica Pickens

Published: Sunday, October 20, 2013 at 02:42 PM.

Twelve Jefferson Elementary fourth graders have an extra bounce in their step on Fridays.

“Today is Friday, isn’t it?” they ask Principal Paula Peeler.

Their excitement stems from Shelby High Football players that visit at lunch time.

Jefferson Elementary and Shelby High coach Lance Ware recently teamed to start the Football Buddies program.

The Shelby High seniors visit Jefferson during their weight lifting class and spend time with the fourth graders.

“I wish you could come every day and I hope you never get sick on a Friday,” one fourth grader wrote in a letter to his Football Buddy.

The football players look forward to Fridays also, because they remember how impressionable they were at that age, Ware said.

“It’s really reminiscent interacting with the kids,” said football player Hill Morgan. “Sure, we could be in weight lifting because we have a game tonight. But I think it’s better for us to be here and experience this.”

Jefferson Elementary guidance counselors and Ware paired football players and fourth graders based on their needs.

“We picked out some students who needed some extra attention. These boys could be the difference in their lives,” said counselor Lara Rucker. “We wanted a mentor for some of these boys to boost their self-esteem and help them make good choices.”

The football players go to Jefferson wearing their jerseys. They eat lunch with the students and then help them with their school work.

“After they finish their work, they will throw a football or play basketball,” said Peeler. “But even as they play, the guys tie school work into their games and will ask our students multiplication questions. I’m so proud and I hope it continues.”

Investing time for children

What's happening at Jefferson Elementary could make the difference in the lives of those 12 students. But many other children in our community don't get that same extra attention and are in need of mentoring.

A mentor could fill the void and provide a sense of community in a child's life, according to retired county educator Collette Deviney.

"A lot of children are coming from troubled families that use alcohol and drugs," Deviney said . "A lot of these children skip school, engage in violence and have very poor peer and family relationships. They come from single parent homes or have no parents at all."

A mentor could mean the difference of a child going to college or change their home life.

"There was one little girl who was stayed to herself, never talked and faded into the background," said Deviney, who also organizes Connect, Commit to Change - an event that pairs volunteers with helping agencies that support local children in need. "One day we found out she was being sexually abused and brought in a mentor to work with her. She improved, ended up graduating from high school and college and now has children of her own who are about to graduate from high school. She is has a good reputation in the community and I believe that having a mentor led to that."

Mentors are needed in the schools to help students before they head in the wrong direction, according to Communities in Schools mentoring services coordinator Donnie Thurman.

“I see crime mug shots on the front of the paper and I wonder why someone couldn’t have gotten to that person,” Thurman said. “A few months ago I saw a guy who was accused of murder, and I remember seeing him back when he was in middle school.”

All school levels need mentors but two of the most important are elementary and high school, Thurman said.

“The earlier a child can see a positive influence, the better,” Thurman said. “In high school they are having a mature conversation and thinking about their future and it’s not too late to help at that point. That’s often where we some of our biggest crimes and juvenile delinquency.”

The most important thing is not to give up on the child, even if they are resisting your help, he said.

“It’s kind of like vision when people need glasses. Mentors can help them see clearly,” Thurman said. “We can be their 20/20 vision and help them have a new perspective.”

How to help

To become a lunch buddy or a mentor for a child, contact Communities in Schools at 704-480-5569 for a mentoring form. Background checks are performed on each mentor and then mentors are matched with a student.

Consistency is the key for a mentor, Deviney said.

"If you make a commitment to be a lunch buddy, it is crucial to always come back and build that trust," she said. "Many children see this as rejection and think it is their fault."

Mentoring forms can also be found in each school.

How you can help

Connect, Commit to Change

What is it? An annual event connecting dozens of organizations who help children to volunteers who keep those organizations operating. During the event, which is a partnership between The Star and the community, those organizations share what they do and connect with community members willing to help their cause. From serving as a lunch buddy to spending time outdoors with an inner-city child, there are a variety of ways to help.

How can you help? Attend the event and connect with an organization in need.

When is it? Saturday, Nov. 2, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Where is it? Shelby City Park

Last year, nearly 100 people committed to volunteer with a local helping agency during the 2012 Connect, Commit to Change event at Shelby City Park. This year, about 100 have already committed to helping local children.

The event will partner with Hog Happnin’, an annual fundraiser to benefit Children’s Homes of Cleveland County. Groups will share work to promote assistance for area children in need.

Want to volunteer with this year's event? Contact Collette Deviney atcollettedeviney@aol.com. Volunteer opportunities are available for both teens and adults.

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Twelve Jefferson Elementary fourth graders have an extra bounce in their step on Fridays.

“Today is Friday, isn’t it?” they ask Principal Paula Peeler.

Their excitement stems from Shelby High Football players that visit at lunch time.

Jefferson Elementary and Shelby High coach Lance Ware recently teamed to start the Football Buddies program.

The Shelby High seniors visit Jefferson during their weight lifting class and spend time with the fourth graders.

“I wish you could come every day and I hope you never get sick on a Friday,” one fourth grader wrote in a letter to his Football Buddy.

The football players look forward to Fridays also, because they remember how impressionable they were at that age, Ware said.

“It’s really reminiscent interacting with the kids,” said football player Hill Morgan. “Sure, we could be in weight lifting because we have a game tonight. But I think it’s better for us to be here and experience this.”

Jefferson Elementary guidance counselors and Ware paired football players and fourth graders based on their needs.

“We picked out some students who needed some extra attention. These boys could be the difference in their lives,” said counselor Lara Rucker. “We wanted a mentor for some of these boys to boost their self-esteem and help them make good choices.”

The football players go to Jefferson wearing their jerseys. They eat lunch with the students and then help them with their school work.

“After they finish their work, they will throw a football or play basketball,” said Peeler. “But even as they play, the guys tie school work into their games and will ask our students multiplication questions. I’m so proud and I hope it continues.”

Investing time for children

What's happening at Jefferson Elementary could make the difference in the lives of those 12 students. But many other children in our community don't get that same extra attention and are in need of mentoring.

A mentor could fill the void and provide a sense of community in a child's life, according to retired county educator Collette Deviney.

"A lot of children are coming from troubled families that use alcohol and drugs," Deviney said . "A lot of these children skip school, engage in violence and have very poor peer and family relationships. They come from single parent homes or have no parents at all."

A mentor could mean the difference of a child going to college or change their home life.

"There was one little girl who was stayed to herself, never talked and faded into the background," said Deviney, who also organizes Connect, Commit to Change - an event that pairs volunteers with helping agencies that support local children in need. "One day we found out she was being sexually abused and brought in a mentor to work with her. She improved, ended up graduating from high school and college and now has children of her own who are about to graduate from high school. She is has a good reputation in the community and I believe that having a mentor led to that."

Mentors are needed in the schools to help students before they head in the wrong direction, according to Communities in Schools mentoring services coordinator Donnie Thurman.

“I see crime mug shots on the front of the paper and I wonder why someone couldn’t have gotten to that person,” Thurman said. “A few months ago I saw a guy who was accused of murder, and I remember seeing him back when he was in middle school.”

All school levels need mentors but two of the most important are elementary and high school, Thurman said.

“The earlier a child can see a positive influence, the better,” Thurman said. “In high school they are having a mature conversation and thinking about their future and it’s not too late to help at that point. That’s often where we some of our biggest crimes and juvenile delinquency.”

The most important thing is not to give up on the child, even if they are resisting your help, he said.

“It’s kind of like vision when people need glasses. Mentors can help them see clearly,” Thurman said. “We can be their 20/20 vision and help them have a new perspective.”

How to help

To become a lunch buddy or a mentor for a child, contact Communities in Schools at 704-480-5569 for a mentoring form. Background checks are performed on each mentor and then mentors are matched with a student.

Consistency is the key for a mentor, Deviney said.

"If you make a commitment to be a lunch buddy, it is crucial to always come back and build that trust," she said. "Many children see this as rejection and think it is their fault."

Mentoring forms can also be found in each school.

How you can help

Connect, Commit to Change

What is it? An annual event connecting dozens of organizations who help children to volunteers who keep those organizations operating. During the event, which is a partnership between The Star and the community, those organizations share what they do and connect with community members willing to help their cause. From serving as a lunch buddy to spending time outdoors with an inner-city child, there are a variety of ways to help.

How can you help? Attend the event and connect with an organization in need.

When is it? Saturday, Nov. 2, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Where is it? Shelby City Park

Last year, nearly 100 people committed to volunteer with a local helping agency during the 2012 Connect, Commit to Change event at Shelby City Park. This year, about 100 have already committed to helping local children.

The event will partner with Hog Happnin’, an annual fundraiser to benefit Children’s Homes of Cleveland County. Groups will share work to promote assistance for area children in need.

Want to volunteer with this year's event? Contact Collette Deviney atcollettedeviney@aol.com. Volunteer opportunities are available for both teens and adults.