The Lies About Why Some Men Run Hot & Cold: NOT What You’d Think

By Erin Elizabeth

A relationship, especially the beginning of one can be pretty confusing. You have to not only figure out and establish your own feelings for a person, you have to also recognize and accept what they’re feeling, too.

When a guy is hot and cold—lavishing you with love and warmth and then seems to pull away at the smallest sign of a conflict—it makes it that much harder.

Behavior like that can leave you wondering what you think about him—second-guessing your feelings—but can definitely leave you in the dark of how he feels about you when he runs hot and cold.

Instinctual Behavior

This might be hard to believe, but the reason why he might be pulling away, even after a wonderful date or when you think it seems to be going really well is that it’s just built into their system. Especially if they weren’t looking to be part of a relationship, they might realize how committed it’s becoming between you two and are looking for a way out.

Insecurity

Even though others may say it’s a guy being a guy, it actually might just have to do with the way he feels about himself. He might be coming on extremely strong in the beginning—wanting to begin something real with you—and then back off as soon as it gets hot and heavy (not that kind of hot and heavy). The fact that he was really into you and showed you and then was feeling insecure about how you felt about him might make him back off and basically, run away from the situation.

Uncertainty

Especially if it wasn’t his goal to get into a relationship, he might feel like what’s going on between you two is getting pretty out of hand—well, out of his control, at least. The fact that he doesn’t know where he wants it to go can determine how he’ll behave towards the situation, regardless of how you get tossed around in the process. It can be confusing, frustrating, and make you upset but at least he’s happy..right??

Playing Hard to Get

This one is a little interesting because it’s normally seen as the other way around. However, if a guy comes on strong to you already and then pulls away quickly afterward, it might be his “oh —, what did I just do?” moment. This means he might have just realized the gravity of his words and feelings and didn’t want to let you on to how serious or how much he was thinking about you.

Basically, going in and then coming out afterward—in his mind—makes him feel like he’s keeping a balance between you two. Not showing his true feelings or doing so and then quickly drawing away so he isn’t easily-handled might be the behavior that will show you what his intentions were in the first place.

So What Should You DO?

If you are into the guy and feel like he’s throwing you around like a rag doll (and not in a good way), then you should definitely do your best to not get caught in the chaos. Recognize where he’s coming from but also recognize where it’s going. If you realize it early enough, you can either address him about it and make it stop—as in, he’ll stop his behavior and either move on or move forward with the relationship—or you should get out. It’s definitely not worth it to be in a relationship like that because you’ll just be getting your feelings hurt.

Regardless if you think his motives or subconscious, innocent or malevolent, if you don’t want to deal with it, approach him about it or leave.

Ask any man in the dating game today,
and he’ll tell you — there’s a real
shortage of sensual women in society
today, just as there’s a shortage of
real, emotionally-mature men!

But by “sexy,” I’m not talking about
JUST being physically sexy…

I’m talking about being sexy in ALL
areas of your life. I want you to LOOK
sexy, I want you to FEEL sexy, I want
you to SOUND sexy, I want you to THINK
sexy, I want you to LIVE sexy.

Life’s too short to be unattractive!

So let me ask you: Do you want to be
TRULY sexy?

If you answer is “yes,” then let’s
get started! Let’s begin the newsletter
by discussing one of the most common,
most basic, and perhaps most annoying
problems we encounter in the dating
game:

SOME WOMEN ARE SEXIER THAN WE ARE

That’s right — some women seem to have
been BORN attractive.

At first glance, they’re immediately
sexy, beautiful, and sensual. And yes,
they enjoy an unfair edge in the dating
game — they get most of the attention
from the men!

What about the rest of us? Are we
relegated to the sidelines, watching as
these women swallow up all the attention
from the men?

Or is there something we can do to level
the playing field a little bit?

Fortunately, there IS something we can
do about the problem. After all, is
physical attraction the only thing that
matters in the dating game?

Nope!

Sure, it can START things — but it does
a terrible job at finishing it. If you
know of certain sexy, beautiful women
who always have bad relationships with
men, then you know what I mean.

Nope, you can’t rely on your looks
alone. You’ll have to be sexy in other
areas of your life, as well! Because
here’s the solution to the problem:

IT’S WHAT HE DISCOVERS LATER THAT MAKES
HIM FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU!

Let’s talk a bit about the two kinds of
men in the dating game. I believe there
are only two types — little boys and
real men.

(I know I’m stereotyping a little, but
humor me. You’ll see what I mean soon
enough!)

Door number one, little boys.

Little boys are non-committing little
creatures. They’re the players who go
into the dating game to chase skirts,
and are definitely after “trophy
girlfriends.”

And yes, once they’ve had their fun with
one sexy woman, they’ll move on to the
next.

Door number two: real men.

Real men, on the other hand, are
commitment-ready. They appreciate sexy
women, but since they’re in it for the
long haul, they unconsciously also look
for other qualities in the women they
meet.

These are the men who are mature enough
to know how to handle a real
relationship.

Now tell me — which do you want? Door
number one or door number two?

I hope it’s number two — it’s the ONLY
choice to make if you want some real
romantic happiness in your future!

And to attract the real men out there,
you’ll need MORE than just to look sexy.
Here are a few tips to help you become a
little more sexy on the inside.
#1 – NO DRAMA

Real men would much rather not have any
amount of drama in their relationships
— it wastes his time, it doesn’t get
you what you want, and it’s downright
annoying. I’m pretty sure even the
little boys hate it!

By the way, it’s important to define
drama NOT from OUR perspective, but from
the GUY’S perspective!

Many years ago, I volunteered at an
orphanage. One day, one of the kids came
to me, telling me his toy car had
stopped running. The batteries had died,
so I had to replace them.

The problem: I couldn’t find a
screwdriver to open the battery
compartment. So I tried to “MacGyver” it
– I tried using a butter knife, a coin,
and a paper clip. Nothing worked.

After an hour of trying, I was ready to
get a hammer and smash the darned thing
open.

But at that moment, the boy tugged at my
sleeve and said: “Miss Alex, I found a
screwdriver.”

I took the screwdriver. Less than a
minute later, the toy car was working
again, and everyone was happy.

What’s the moral of the story?

Just this: Broken relationships are like
broken toys. To fix them, you just need
the right tools.

May I make a bold statement? ANY
RELATIONSHIP CAN BE FIXED.

Any relationship. No exceptions. No
matter how broken or damaged or strained
it is – with the right tools, it can
work again, and everyone will be happy
again.

Unfortunately, many great couples today
are unable to give themselves a second
chance.

Why? Simply because they’re using the
wrong tools.

========================================
ARE YOU USING THE WRONG TOOLS?
========================================

To fix anything, there are a million
“wrong tools” out there… and just a
handful of “right tools.”

And in dating and relationships, these
are 4 of the most common “wrong tools”
to fix a problem:

Wrong Tool #1 – Waiting For Him To
Apologize.

When we get into a spat with our man, we
often wait for him to fix things. We
think: “Why should I apologize first?
He’s the guy. It’s his job to fix
things.”

Does this mentality fix things? …No.

Wrong Tool #2 – Saying What He Doesn’t
Want To Hear

When we argue with our guy, we often
nag, accuse, criticize, insult,
blackmail… or simply give him the
silent treatment. We want him to feel
GUILTY, and maybe knock some sense into
him.

Problem is: How often has this approach
REALLY worked?

Wrong Tool #3 – Begging Him To Come Back

Sometimes, when we DO apologize first,
we do it in a begging, pleading way,
trying to gain his sympathy.

Unfortunately, if he already broke up
with you, this approach will make you
look needy and desperate… which, as we
already know, is uglier than ugly.

And finally:

Wrong Tool #4 – Focusing On The Problem

After a breakup, we usually spend a week
(or much longer) wondering: “What went
wrong? What if I did this – would it
have made a difference? If I did that,
would we still be together?”

Dwelling on the past never helped
anyone, and it certainly won’t help fix
your relationship!

But that’s the sad thing. Many of us use
these wrong tools over and over and over
again. So the relationship becomes an
even BIGGER mess.

And then, when things finally fall
apart, we give up and whine:

“All men are JERKS!”

“Love is a lie!”

“I’m going to be single FOREVER!”

And that’s silly. None of that is true.

You just used the wrong tools. Period.

Have you ever used the wrong tools
before?

Are you using the wrong tools RIGHT NOW?

If so, let’s wrap up this Newsletter by
fixing the problem with…

========================================
ALL THE RIGHT TOOLS
========================================

Here’s a couple of questions to think
about:

Why did the generations of our
grandparents and great-grandparents
enjoy a super-low 10% divorce rate
(compared to a disturbing 45% today)?

How did so many couples back then stay
together for 50, 60, 70 happy years?

Here’s an actual answer by a grandmother
who had been happily married to her man
for 65 years:

“We were born in a time when if
something was broken, we would FIX it,
not throw it away.”

In other words, you need the RIGHT TOOLS
– such as the proven relationship-fixing
tools I teach in my 77 Secrets To Save A
Relationship eBook collection. For
instance:

Right Tool #1 – Apologizing Anyway.

To fix a problem, it doesn’t matter who
apologizes first. So might as well get
the ball rolling by reaching out, right?

Besides, what’s more important to you…
your pride, or your relationship? 😉

(More of this tool in Bonus eBook #2 –
9 Crucial Things To Say To Get Him Back)

Right Tool #2 – Saying What He Wants And
Needs To Hear

If you REALLY want to connect with a
man, you have to know how to speak in
his “language” – otherwise, it’s always
going to be a one-sided discussion.

To learn everything a man wants and
needs to hear from you, read Secrets
#21-24.

Right Tool #3 – Instead Of Chasing,
Create Space.

Attracting a man into a life isn’t about
chasing him – it’s about turning the
situation upside-down and making HIM
chase you.

And after a break-up, the easiest way to
do that is to create some “space” in
your life to invite him back in.

The details are all in Secret #8 of my
77 Secrets To Save Your Relationship.

And finally:

Right Tool #4 – Focus On The Solution.

In love and life, whatever you focus on
will grow. So why focus on the problems?
Why focus on whatever caused the
breakup?

Instead, focus on the solution. Millions
of happy couples have fixed their
troubled relationships in the past – why
not do what worked for them?

Over the years, I’ve compiled the proven
solutions, successful strategies, and
RIGHT TOOLS that happy couples have
used. And now, they’re in the most
comprehensive problem-solving eBook
collection for women – my 77 Secrets To
Save Your Relationship.

And best of all? It can be YOURS,
risk-free for 30 days, by visiting the
website below!

Wouldn’t it be great to have a
complete “toolkit” to help fix ANY
relationship problem that comes your
way? That’s exactly why I wrote my 77
Secrets To Save Your Relationship eBook
collection. Get your copy here!

Men can be the most confusing creatures.
Just when you think you have them
figured out, they throw you a curve
ball! Do any of these scenarios seem
familiar?

He seems to be headed into a serious
relationship with you and then the next
day he wants to take things slow.

He swears he is in love with you but he
can’t stop checking out other women.

He wants to play the field even though
he says you are the best thing that ever
happened to him.

He refuses to talk about things but when
you make a decision without him, he gets
mad!

Things get hot and heavy and you wind up
in bed…but after a few weeks he drops
you cold-turkey and you never hear from
him again.

Let’s be honest, ladies: sometimes,
men can seem like real jerks. They do
things that seem to make no sense. They
can seem like a 12-year-old trapped in a
man’s body.

But by understanding the way men think,
we can “get” them in a way we
haven’t before.

Make no mistake: There are some men who
ARE jerks. Those are the men that should
be left in the dust! But if you have
found a good man who just needs a little
more understanding, you’re in luck!

These tips and ideas can help you
understand how men think.

TIP #1: MEN NOTICE WOMEN

This is always going to happen. Men will
always notice women.

It doesn’t matter what they have at
home. You could be a supermodel! You
could be the richest woman in the
country! You could be the perfect woman!

Men will still notice someone else.
You can get upset. You can cry about it.
You can scream at him for being
insensitive.

He will still do it.

He will apologize and beg for
forgiveness. He can tell you it was not
a big deal.

But he will still do it.

Here’s why: Men are hard-wired to see
women in a sexual sense. It’s not
something they consciously do. It is so
deeply ingrained in them over centuries
that they can’t overcome it, even if
they tried.

They will notice legs. Cleavage gets
their attention. A tiny waist can turn
their head.

But it does NOT mean they don’t want
you! Men do these things without
thinking. The vast majority of the time,
he really, honestly, truly does NOT
realize he’s doing it!

How can you battle this?

Play up your sexiness! Show more
cleavage. Wear high heels to show off
your gorgeous legs. Find out what he
likes and play it up to the hilt!

It won’t stop him from looking at
other women. Nothing can do that.
But it will give him plenty of incentive
to notice you, too. It will spice things
up, and everybody loves a little spice!

TIP #2: MEN SOMETIMES NEED A CLUE

How many times has this happened to you:
You drop hints about that great new
restaurant. He never takes you there.

You mention that you would love to get
flowers at work. They never show up.
You ask him to go to a play with you. On
the night of the play, he “forgot”
he was busy and never shows up.

You ask him to take out the trash and
two days later, it is still sitting
there.

ARGH! It’s so annoying!

You know what I’m talking about.
You’ve been there!

Men have a tendency to let things go in
one ear and out the other. They don’t
sweat the small stuff. What might seem
like a big deal to you doesn’t seem
like a deal at all to them.

It isn’t that he’s not listening. He
is! He just doesn’t immediately
realize what is important and what is
not.

And let’s face it: men rarely pick up
on subtle hints. They often need to be
hit upside the head with a clue-by-four
in order to get the picture!

You can remedy this in two ways:

First, stay subtle, but mention it
often. You want flowers? Mention it
every few days. Make the idea stick in
his head and see what happens.

Second, you can be blunt. Tell him you
want flowers. Ask him if he might send
you a bouquet one day. The clearer you
are, the more it will stick!

TIP #3: MEN NEED TO FEEL IN CONTROL.

This is a very big point about how men
think. They need to be in control of
their life and the world around them.

They get nervous, anxious and resentful
if they are not in control of those
things.

The fastest way to turn a man off is to
tell him what to do!

He wants to talk to you. He wants to
know what is on your mind. But he
doesn’t want to have to do something
just because you feel a certain way.

Men want to be in control of their own
lives. It is the alpha male in them.
They are masters of their domain and
kings of their castle!

Tell him what to do and you will push
him away.

Take those three little words, for
example: “I love you.”

A man might want to say that to you. He
might feel those emotions. But if you
are waiting and hoping for it and making
it clear that you need the next step, he
might back off and not say it – even
if he feels it!

WHY?

Men do this because they don’t want to
feel controlled. Being controlled means
giving up a part of themselves. So they
avoid it at all costs.

But I know what you’re thinking:
“If I don’t TELL him what I want or
need, he won’t get it! He doesn’t
get subtle!”

That’s where a delicate dance comes
in. You have to balance what YOU need
with the control HE needs to have.
It’s not an easy situation to be in!

This is where you choose your battles.
If it matters to you, tell him.

If it doesn’t matter to you, let it
go.

It’s easier said than done. But it can
be done! It takes time and effort, and
it starts with figuring out how his mind
works. Knowing how men think can go a
long way toward getting what you want!

UNDERSTAND HOW MEN THINK!

Here is the biggest piece of advice I
can give you:

He will never think the same way you do.

Start by understanding how he thinks,
and then you can find a way to meet in
the middle.

Are you ready to understand him in a way
you never have before?

Are you tired of dealing with the
questions and complications that make
you wonder if you know him at all?

“Sir, your daughter is mad about me,” he
said. “She says she loves me, she needs
me, and can’t live without me.”

The father replied, “So you’re asking
for my permission to marry her?”

The man said, “No, sir, please make her
LEAVE ME ALONE!”

(Ouch!)

Do you sometimes HATE the dating game?

Sometimes it’s unfair. The witches and
bitches get all the good men, while the
smart, attractive, kindhearted women
like us get NOTHING.

Other times, it’s just mean. There are
some guys out there who love us then
leave us.

A guy gets our hopes up, and when we’re
100% ready to give our entire lives to
him, we realize he has another
girlfriend across town.

And perhaps worst of all – when we’re
truly in love with a man, he never EVER
feels the same way for us.

Why do these bad things ALWAYS happen?

If you’re like most women, you’re
probably disillusioned with the love
game. You may have grown up with a
“Disney Princess” idea of love… but
your current reality has more angst and
drama than two seasons of Grey’s
Anatomy!

Are you really STUCK with a lousy love
life?

Fortunately, the answer is (and always
will be) “NO…”

========================================
HOW TO CHANGE YOUR LOVE LIFE
========================================

If you’ve been reading my Newsletters
and eBooks recently, then you’ve
probably noticed that here at the
Unforgettable Woman community, we take
control of our love lives.

We do what WORKS, and we don’t care what
other people think!

Here at our community, we know that our
happiness is NOT CONTROLLED by other
people.

In fact, our happiness isn’t even
controlled by the dating game!

Who’s in control? YOU’RE in control.

You run the show! You make the
decisions!

Want a love story worthy of your
favorite fairy tales? Then you go WRITE
your own fairy tale.

Want a happy ending? Then you go WRITE
your script with a happy ending. You
take control!

Of course, it’s not that simple. Writing
your own “happy ending” in love involves
not only making your own decisions, but
making the RIGHT decisions.

It’s like taking a road trip. If you
don’t know the directions to your
destination, it doesn’t matter where
you’re going – you WILL get lost!

So what are the RIGHT decisions?

Let’s start with the easy stuff, like
the joke I opened this Newsletter with.
Have you ever loved a guy a LOT more
than he loved you?

It’s crazy right? He never really mans
up and commits to you.

Or when he does, he can’t commit for
long – and he eventually leaves before
he suffocates.

Why can’t men appreciate your undying
love, attention, and affection?

Simple – because he doesn’t SEE it as
love, attention, or affection!

Instead, he just feels ANNOYED by it.

It’s like this. When you were still a
little girl, did you have a sibling, or
a cousin, or a classmate who was SO
ANNOYING that you always shooed them
away?

Or when you got older, did you have an
annoying classmate, an annoying
co-worker, or an annoying salesman who
just wouldn’t leave you alone?

Guess what – that’s EXACTLY what the guy
feels when he doesn’t love you as much
as you love him! It’s annoying, and all
he wants you to do is LEAVE HIM ALONE.

Ouch!

I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it
again – seduction isn’t about “catching”
a guy. It’s about turning the tables on
him, making him chase you, and “letting
him catch” you!

What’s it called again?

That’s right – PLAYING HARD TO GET.

And I know that’s a little difficult to
accept…

========================================
WHY PLAYING HARD TO GET IS HARD
========================================

I’ve met some women who think playing
hard to get is EVIL.

They tell me: “Alexandra, isn’t that
manipulative? Aren’t you tricking a guy
to do what you want?”

No, that’s NOT the kind of “playing hard
to get” I’m talking about.

Like everything else, there’s a WRONG
way and a RIGHT way to play hard to get.
And if you’re “tricking” a guy – if your
actions are based on lies and deception
– that’s the WRONG way.

What’s the RIGHT way?

The RIGHT way – the Unforgettable Woman
way – of playing hard to get is based on
one thing, and one thing only…

And that’s VALUING YOURSELF.

It’s about LOVING yourself.

Do you love yourself?

If you do, then wouldn’t you want to
make sure that only the BEST, most
SUCCESSFUL, most LOVING men make it into
your life?

That’s the problem with the WRONG way of
playing hard to get. When you have to
resort to lies and tricks to make a man
love you, it means you don’t really love
yourself.

And it means you’re ready to SETTLE for
guys who don’t deserve you. Don’t YOU
make that mistake!

Again, the RIGHT way of playing hard to
get is all about LOVING yourself.
Because if you don’t love yourself, who
will?

Not the guys, that’s for sure!

Sure, some guys out there are WONDERFUL
– and they’ll love you even when you
don’t love yourself.

But they’re rare – like one in a
million. Do you really want a “one in a
million” chance at happiness?

Why not learn how to ATTRACT these
wonderful men into your life, instead of
waiting to “bump” into them?

That’s right – you CAN attract strong,
mature, loving, nurturing men into your
life. How?

You guessed it – by playing hard to get,
the RIGHT way!

In the Unforgettable Woman community,
it’s the right way or the highway. And I
teach the RIGHT way of playing hard to
get in my eBook collection, How To Play
Hard To Get.

In it, you’ll learn:

…How to make men see you as a
“challenging” woman… and not “easy”
(Chapter 2)

…How to play hard to get with friends,
with crushes, and with HUGE crushes
(Chapter 5)

…How to deal with problems, mistakes,
and disappointment in love and life
(Chapter 10)

…The different ways to play hard to
get – and how to choose the RIGHT way
(Chapter 4)

…Setting the kinds of standards that
attract the BEST men in the game
(Chapter 3)

…A “timeline” of making a man fall in
love with you (Chapter 9)

…and much, much more!

Try it for 30 days – if the right way of
playing hard to get doesn’t help you
meet a better guy or two (or more!) in 4
weeks or less, you get your money back!

Sure, it’s HIS job to ask you out, to
pursue you, and to propose to you.

But remember – it takes two people to
make a relationship work. And it’s YOUR
job to BE asked out, BE pursued, and BE
proposed to!

Let me say that again – it’s totally
under your control. And depending on how
you play the dating game, you can either
DELAY your marriage… RUIN your
marriage… or GUARANTEE a strong,
happy, loving marriage that lasts a
lifetime.

But it’s not enough to tell me now:
“Okay, Alexandra, I’m going to take
control of my future from now on.”

If you’re thinking that, then sorry, you
didn’t get it.

You’ve been controlling your life for
YEARS. You just didn’t know it. The
choices you made 2, 5, 10 years ago led
you to your situation RIGHT NOW.

So if you’re single and miserable… or
if you’re a regular victim of men who
don’t believe in marriage… then you’ve
probably made, and are still currently
making, bad choices!

The good news? It just takes ONE GOOD
DECISION to change your luck. Just one
good decision to turn things around for
your love life!

But why stop at one? Let me give you
three pieces of free expert dating
advice:

========================================
TIP #3 – MAKE IT ABOUT YOU, NOT HIM
========================================

Finally, never EVER try to “convince”
him to commit to you.

And never try to ask him confrontational
questions like:

“When are YOU going to commit?”
“Why are YOU taking so long to propose?”
“YOU really don’t have any plans to
settle down with me, do you?”

Sure, it may help you let out a little
steam… but in the long run, it can
kill all chances of him committing to
you.

In fact, men often start planning their
exits from your relationship once
questions like these arise!

My advice? Don’t make it about him. Make
it about YOU.

In other words, say “I,” not “you.”

Here’s a simple, powerful line that has
helped many of my readers guarantee a
proposal from their men:

“I love you, but I also need you to know
that I’d like to settle down eventually.
That way I can enjoy our love completely
and without fear.”

See? It’s not confrontational. It’s
about YOU, not him. And you still got
your message across in a gentle, loving,
accepting way.

========================================
MAKE HIM COMMIT TO YOU!
========================================

Let me say that again – your future in
love and marriage is completely under
your control.

But thanks to our male-oriented media…
and our own self-esteem issues… we end
up NOT using this control. And instead,
we allow MEN and our circumstances to
control our future.

Don’t YOU make that mistake! Remember,
if you don’t take control of your life,
OTHER people will. And I’m pretty sure
these “other people” don’t have much
planned for you.

So I invite you to take control of your
love life by reading my advice and
strategies in my Getting That Proposal
eBook collection. Aside from the tips I
gave in today’s Newsletter, I also teach
you the following skills:

(1) How to tell if a man is willing to
commit or not – after only a few dates
(2) How to turn a playboy into a family
man
(3) How to be more “wife-material” for
him
(4) How to prevent marriage problems in
the future
(5) How to talk to him about marriage…
without scaring him
(6) How to move from “relationship” to
“marriage”
(7) How to build a strong marriage

Want to get the proposal soon? Then take
complete control of your future
happiness. Take the first step by
reading my eBook below!

If you do, then I have bad news to you. It’s probably the
reason why your love life isn’t as good as it can be.

Why? Because of a simple truth about love and life:

Your beliefs are a thousand times more powerful than your
decisions.

You can “decide” to love a man. You can “decide” to be a
good date, girlfriend, or wife. You can “decide” to be
everything a man needs in his life.

But if you BELIEVE men are cowards… or sex-crazed… or
dense… then you’ll ALWAYS be skeptical and mistrustful
of them. No matter what you decide.

Don’t you agree? After all, if you secretly dislike and
mistrust men deep in your heart, why in the world would
they like and trust you?

Here’s my simple message for today: If you want to find
love and happiness, then the journey starts from within.

You need to get rid of these toxic beliefs, and change
your attitude into something that actually brings love,
happiness, and blessings into your life… instead of
blocking them!

Here are some of the most common misconceptions we women
have about men, and what to do if you have them:

Misconception #1: When He’s Giving Me The
Silent Treatment, He’s Up To Something.

When we give a guy the silent treatment, what’s it for?

Usually, it’s because he did something we didn’t like, or
something that was incredibly insensitive. And we just
want him to suffer for it.

Sometimes, we just want to annoy him. Or we want to bait
him into an argument, and beat him… and force him to
apologize and do something we want.

It’s one of our most powerful weapons against men, and it
drives them crazy!

That’s why when a guy suddenly goes quiet, and when we ask
what’s wrong he just says “Nothing,” it’s easy to get
hurt, angry, or insulted.

Doesn’t he trust you? Doesn’t he know he’s hurting you? He
must be up to something!

Unfortunately, this misconception just leads to arguments
and misunderstandings. And the sad part? There was no
reason to get angry in the first place.

Why? Because men go silent for different reasons than
women.

Women go silent when they want their men to think about
what they did.

Men go silent when they have to make big decisions in
life… such as getting a second job, or moving places of
residence… or committing to a woman for the rest of his
life.

That’s right – many times, when a man suddenly goes quiet
in your relationship, it’s not because he’s up to
something, or he’s losing interest, or he’s seeing another
woman.

Many times, he’s just thinking REALLY hard about your
future. He’s trying to see if he’s really making the right
decision for his life.

Unfortunately, when you misconceive his silence as an
attack on you, you tend to react negatively to it. You
argue, you nag, you accuse… and you ultimately make him
realize that it’s NOT the right decision to commit to you.

Oops!

Now do you see how your misconceptions about men can keep
you single and miserable for a long, long time? 😉

(NOTE: To learn more about the secrets of male psychology,
especially when it comes to love and dating, read my eBookhere!)

Let’s move on to…

Misconception #2: Guys Only Want Sex.

Here’s another common misconception. Since we meet a lot
of horny guys in today’s dating scene, it’s easy to assume
that guys only want sex.

As a result, we tend to look at guys with mistrust and
disgust… emotions that keep relationships stuck at a
“casual” level.

It’s true – sex is usually the first thing on guy’s minds
when it comes to dating a new woman.

But it’s wrong to believe it’s the ONLY thing on their
minds!

We need to understand that men don’t fall in love the same
way we do. While we fall in love hard and fast, men fall
in love in stages.

And when you understand these stages, then you can CONTROL
these stages! You can move your relationship forward
through the stages that men naturally go through, making
him fall in love with you more and more as time goes by.

Do you have the toxic belief that men only want sex?

Now you know why you need to break that mentality fast!

Get Rid Of Your Obstacles To Happiness!

Let me say that again – if you REALLY want to find true
love and happiness with a great man, then you MUST get rid
of your toxic beliefs about men.

Remember, your beliefs are a thousand times more powerful
than your decisions.

And when you get rid of your toxic beliefs… and replace
them with new, wonderful, TRUE beliefs about men… then
your decisions in love instantly becomes a thousand times
more powerful.

Wouldn’t you want your chances at happiness to increase by
a thousand times? Then I encourage you to read my eBook on
male psychology, Unmask The Male Mind.

It has all the secrets and strategies to help you get rid
of any and all toxic beliefs about men you may have… and
finally open the door to the happiness you want and
deserve!

If you’re not having trouble understanding your man,
but would like your relationship to reach the “next level”
anyway, then this eBook is for you! Learn what a man needs
to love, commit, and cherish you for the rest of his life
read my eBook now.

“Debbie” was once in a great
relationship with a great guy from
school for almost two years.
Unfortunately, after graduation, he
started working in a different country –
and their long-distance relationship
didn’t work out.

Debbie was crushed, but she was
determined not to be lonely. So she
started dating again. She started
meeting new men.

The problem? She gravitated towards the
men who reminded her of her
ex-boyfriend.

She even got into a relationship with a
guy who looked almost EXACTLY like her
ex! So it was almost like her first
relationship never ended.

Unfortunately, Debbie was living in a
dream. Her new boy was great, but he was
totally different from her ex-boyfriend
– and soon, Debbie’s unrealistic
expectations began to suffocate the poor
guy.

Needless to say, Debbie’s new
relationship didn’t work out.

Should Debbie have looked for the exact
opposite of her ex-boyfriend, instead?

Here’s my answer: The dating game is NOT
about finding the right guy for you.

It’s about going out there, meeting many
different guys, and BEING FOUND by the
best possible guy for your life.

After all, what’s the use of FINDING the
“right guy for you…” if HE doesn’t
think you’re the right girl for him?

It takes two people to make a
relationship work!

So what does it take to “be found?”

Simple: To be found, you’ll need to be a
fantastic person living a fantastic
life.

No joke!

As I always say: “If you’re not happy
single, you won’t be happy in a
relationship.” Period.

And that’s the basis of our teachings
here in the Unforgettable Woman
community. While other dating coaches
urge you to “find a great guy to be
happy,” we teach you to “be happy to
attract great guys.”

Isn’t that a much better, much more fun
way to live? 😉

So how do you become a fantastic person
living a fantastic life?

That’s the best news of all…

============================== ==========
HOW TO BECOME A “MAN MAGNET”
============================== ==========

Here’s a fact: Guys go CRAZY for smart,
attractive, kindhearted women who have
their lives in order.

That’s why women who don’t make enemies,
who don’t hold grudges, and who focus on
the GOOD things in life… end up with
the best guys and the happiest marriages
of all.

Here at the Unforgettable Woman
community, we slowly and steadily teach
women how to get their lives in order.
For instance, when you signed up to our
Newsletter, you got my free eBook, “How
To Be A Man Magnet.” Right?

Then, our Newsletters slowly and
steadily taught you the REAL DEAL about
love and dating. By now, I’m sure you’ve
gotten rid of a few bad habits and toxic
beliefs, and that’s great! 😉

Often, some smart women ask me: “Alexandra, what’s the
most important dating skill to have?”

I usually answer: “The basics are the most important –
confidence, conversation skills, fashion sense, body
language. They get the ball rolling.”

Then, they ask me again: “Sure, but what’s the MOST
IMPORTANT one?”

If you had to choose just one skill to grow, then my
answer would be: Your conversation skills.

Why? Because all the other important skills – confidence,
body language, fashion sense, understanding male
psychology, etc. – can be developed faster and more easily
if you’re a good conversationalist.

Are you fantastically skilled with talking to men?
Or do you still make embarrassing remarks, boring spiels,
and awkward silences?

If you’re not a superstar conversationalist, then don’t
worry. Today, I’ll be sharing with you three conversation
skills that have worked EXTREMELY well for myself and my
readers for years!

Let’s jump right into it with the first skill:

Skill #1 – Making The Conversation Flow

Let’s say you’re at a cafe with a new guy, and you’re
talking about the latest Superman movie. When you run out
of things to say about the movie, what do you do?

Do you abruptly change the topic and talk about your
drink? Do you suffer through an awkward silence? Do you
excuse yourself to run to the bathroom and try to get your
wits together?

Here’s a better idea – make the conversation flow.

Let’s say you run out of things to say about the movie.
Let the conversation flow into a related topic. For
instance, you can say:

“So what’s your favorite movie all-time?”

The thing about guys is that the more they get into a
conversation with you, the more they like you. So if you
could work on just one skill, work on this one first.

It can single-handedly make ANY conversation with ANY guy
more interesting, fun, and flirty!

Here’s the second skill:

Skill #2 – Practice With Your Guy Friends.

Ever noticed that talking with your guy friends is so much
easier than talking to a guy you secretly like?

That’s because you’re under pressure to make a good
impression. You want the guy to like you, too. And that
can tie your brain up in knots, making you say and do
things you later regret!

So to get rid of these jitters, I advise you practice
carrying conversations with your guy friends. (Preferably
the straight ones!)

Try it out. See which topics make them “tick.” Every guy
is different, but here are some topics most guys like
talking about:

(1) Work and business

(2) Current events

(3) Plans for the future

In contrast, avoid these topics with men – they may cause
fire…

(1) Politics

(2) Religion

(3) “Girly” topics like makeup and TV dramas

Here’s a protip: If you want to take your “practicing” to
the next level, try saying “hi” to baristas, to security
guards, to the guy next in line, etc. It builds confidence
like nothing else.

And finally:

Skill #3 – Have An “Awkward Silence Cure.”

No matter how good you are as a conversationalist, there
will always be times when both you and your date run out
of things to say. Cue awkward silence…

This is when it’s great to have an “awkward silence cure.”
Here’s my advice – always keep a few good, funny, or
interesting stories in reserve. That way, when you sense
an awkward silence coming, you can just say, “Oh, by the
way, I just remembered a funny story…”

The great thing about this skill is that the more fun and
fantastic your life is, you’ll have no shortage of
hilarious, exciting stories to tell.

So focus on having a fun life, and awkward silences will
never be a problem for you!

Best Of All? It’s Not Just For Dating

Simple, right? These three tips are enough to turn you
from an average conversationalist to a good one. And with
practice, you can turn from a good conversationalist to a
GREAT one – and guys will always have a good time with
you.

And that’s not even the best part. Being a great
conversationalist isn’t just good for dating.
I’ve met women who actually use these “confident
conversationalist” skills to spice up their MARRIAGES. No
joke!

They just use the skills I teach them to keep their
marriages interesting, always bringing something new to
the table… and their husbands absolutely LOVE it.

Want to learn more about turning your simple words into
the building blocks of a happy, loving relationship? Learn
all the time-tested ways to win a man’s heart by reading
my eBook below:

When an attentive, thoughtful,
affectionate man suddenly goes quiet for
a week, it’s usually a sign that the
relationship made a jump forward that he
wasn’t ready for.

A man, by nature, prefers to move the
relationship forward himself. That’s why
when a woman suddenly moves the
relationship forward – such as by
confessing her feelings or pressuring
him to commit – he’s caught off-guard,
and needs time to process the big
change!

Put simply, he has to feel that moving
the relationship forward was HIS idea…
and it takes a smart, skilled, loving
woman to make a man feel that way!

When a man disappears after a romantic
event – like a romantic dinner, or when
you have sex for the first time, or when
you confess your feelings to him – it’s
usually a sign he feels things are
moving too fast.

Why is that a big deal? Because while we
women fall in love HARD AND FAST, men
fall in love in STAGES.

And sometimes, when a man feels a woman
is RUSHING a relationship, they feel
like running away – as if they’re
jumping off a runaway train!

If this has ever happened to you, I
recommend you read Chapter 14 of this eBook collection. Learn how to bounce
back, get up, and get over a wasted
opportunity… and be ready for the next
one!

============================== ==========
HOW TO MAKE A GUY STAY
============================== ==========

You may have lost a few good men in your
past, and that’s fine. In fact, it
doesn’t really matter.

What REALLY matters is this: Will you
KEEP losing good men in the future?

Here’s the scary fact: If you keep
making mistakes in dating… if you
don’t learn how men think… and if you
don’t adjust to a man’s pace in love…
then you WILL keep losing good men!

Now, some of you might object: “But
Alex, it’s not MY fault! I’m just being
me! It’s HIM who should adjust, not me!”

Look at it this way: If you’re “just
being you,” and men keep running away
from you, then there’s obviously a
problem. Right?

After all, there are lots of women out
there – many of them my own readers –
who are also “just being themselves,”
but are STILL attracting great guys
everywhere they go!

What’s the difference? They simply know
things the rest of us don’t.

They know how men think. They know what
men want. They know how to adjust to a
man’s quirks AND keep the relationship
moving forward at the same time.

All by just being themselves!

Want to learn how to “be yourself” AND
nurture a blossoming relationship at the
same time?

Then I recommend you read my eBook
collection, 77 Ways To Lose A Guy. It
has true stories, life lessons, dating
tips, and everything you need to know
about men and what they REALLY want!

Here are some of the great things you’ll
learn in this eBook collection:

(1) How to let go of a painful past
completely, so you can move forward
again

(2) How to get rid of your fear of
rejection

(3) How to spot emotionally-unavailable
men from the very first date

(4) Is he NOT ready for marriage?
Chapter 8 has everything you need to
know and do

(5) Are you dating a married man? Here’s
how to make it work without stepping on
anyone’s toes… (Chapter 11)

(6) If you let the “right one” get away,
how should you deal with the pain? It’s
all in Chapter 14.

Want to know what happened to “Melinda,”
the woman who cheated on her guy?

After men stopped dating her, and her
friends turned their back to her, and
her family stopped supporting her
decisions, a lonely and desperate
Melinda turned to the one group that
would love and accept even “bad people”
like her: Church.

Melinda tells me:

“At church, I learned to be less about
me, and more about ME AND OTHERS. Why be
happy at others’ expense when we can ALL
be happy together, right?”

Absolutely right, girl!

Today, Melinda is happier, preppier, and
much wiser…. all because she stopped
depending on others for her happiness,
and started WORKING for others’
happiness… and her own!

If you haven’t gone through the
breakup yet – but would like to KEEP a
breakup from happening – then I
recommend this eBook collection instead.
All my eBook collections come with a
30-day money-back guarantee, so go ahead
and give it a shot!

The good news is that even just one or
two of these signs is enough to be
confidently sure that he has feelings
for you. He probably isn’t just 100%
sure about making the move, or he’s
waiting for the best time to tell you.

What’s the bad news? Just this…

============================== ==========
SO YOU KNOW HE HAS FEELINGS FOR YOU.
WHAT NEXT?
============================== ==========

That’s exactly the question: So what
now?

Knowing that he likes you is GREAT. But
it’s not enough. You got to follow
through somehow, or nothing will ever
come out of your little “secret”
relationship!

And not just ANY follow-through will do.
You have to follow through CORRECTLY.

Why? Because some women follow through
the WRONG way… and end up killing the
relationship before it even starts.

Have you ever had a guy friend who liked
you, and when you found out he had
feelings for you, you went ahead and
told him you liked him too… then he
started avoiding you afterwards?

That’s because your “follow-through” was
wrong. It scared him away!

There are many ways to screw up your
follow-through…

(1) You can ask him to “come clean”
about his feelings for you.
(2) You can force him to admit how he
feels about you.
(3) You can confess your feelings to
him.
(4) You can push the relationship by
asking him out, scheduling your dates,
and so on.
(5) …and other crazy things we usually
do!

And it’s crazy how so many of us get
stuck at this point in their
relationships! We had the love of a
great guy at the palms of our hands…
then, by goofing up the follow-through,
we end up losing him.

A couple of years ago, I thought of the
millions of GREAT relationships that
never started out, simply because we
women don’t know the right way to follow
through.

And I decided: “That’s not going to
happen to MY readers!”

That’s why I wrote Signs He Loves You,
an eBook that teaches you the secret,
hidden signs of a man’s true feelings
for you.

How would you like to:

(1) Learn how to read his mind?
(2) Know just how important you are to
him?
(3) Understand the many quirks of male
psychology?
(4) Learn how to tell if he’s lying or
hiding something?
(5) Understand the reasons behind his
strange habits, his mood swings, and his
crazy decisions?