Valentine Undie Guide: What’s in Your Basket?

I haven’t had much luck on Valentine’s Day since I was in grade school and obligatorily received cards and candy from a classroom of gangly 10-year-olds.

Adulthood has proven to be bleak on the romantic front. There was one year that I dated a florist, though. He sent the most spectacular tightly packed mixed bouquet I had ever seen. It was an unconventional arrangement that dominated my work desk and gained even more accolades after my boss received a dozen wilted purple roses from the FTD Martha Stewart Collection.

I have never had the lurid pleasure of unzipping my way to a Valentine treat more satisfying than a box of chocolates. But a queen can dream, can’t she? From boxers to briefs, here are five picks that can put a sizzle in your step whether you’re flying solo or hopping on the love boat.

Baskit’s Billy Boy Collection

Have fun and play safe by wearing Baskit’s Billy Boy condom pocket underwear. Every pair comes with a convenient condom pocket and a Billy Boy condom. Made from 96 percent cotton and 4 percent elastane for that hug-factor, you’ll also have peace of mind knowing that tucked in that pocket waistband is a Billy Boy latex condom.

Snag a pair or two by Feb. 10 and receive 40 percent off.Visit baskitwear.com

babygod

While they’ll quickly end up in a pile on the floor, it’s good to know that your skivvies are made using organic fabrics from fairly traded sources. This UK clothing brand sources certified organic cotton from various countries. According to the company, this certification ensures that farmers a paid a fair price for their cotton, which makes it possible for them to invest in future development.

In the meantime, you can concentrate on the more immediate future and what happens when the babygods come off.

FRIGO 1

If you have a serious athletic wear fetish and want to drop a hundred bucks on a pair of "scorched black" ergodynamic (I think they made that word up, too) undies, whip out your American Express Centurion card and go crazy. In fact, buy two FRIGO 1’s.

The soft lock pouch adjustment may not stay soft for long as ego can be the ultimate stimulator.

David Beckham Bodywear for H&M

It doesn’t have to cost a million to feel like a million. Notice I didn’t say "look" like a million. Slip into a pair of David Beckham boxers and you may want to kick around a soccer ball and get covered in tattoos. You can leave that to the professionals but still enjoy the snug fitting cotton/elastane blend for under $15.

Good Boy Gone Bad

The name says it all. And I’ll leave it up to you whether that refers to the style or your taste level. If you’re looking for that extra special something skimpy to show off your goods, GBGB offers an array of jock straps, swimwear, underwear and gym wear for just about any fantasy you might dream up.

Forget Cupid’s arrow, slip into one of these contraptions and you’ll be sure to be turning heads.

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