Confidence is of course an enormous factor in what makes a person attractive. *GENERALLY* although by NO MEANS always - a person's confidence is damaged by being overweight, or if they think of themselves as too tall, too short, whatever.

But let's be clear... most "hot" people know they're hot and exude confidence that goes along with it. This confidence often overlaps with arrogance.

My ego is perfectly able to take the bruising that "hotties" dish out. However, if I were single I know perfectly well that 99% of them are going to do that. Experience has taught me this. If the "hotties" of the world don't want the rest of us to think of them that way, then they shouldn't act that way. Something tells me they don't care, however....

Windermere FL

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I hate when people in their profile apologize because they say no one over-weight or no certain ethnics, or no singles, or no one under or over a certain age. if that is your preference then why are you apologizing, if they can't understand or respect your preferences, then fuck-um.

Philadelphia PA

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Pity bubble? I didn't say it was the ONLY factor - I said it was a major one.

I stand by what I said.... if you are going to take my words and twist them into meaning something else, there's nothing I can do to stop you...... stop being defensive and think about it. Nobody is saying heavier girls are unattractive. Far from it.

Windermere FL

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Can we all be honest about something here?

How people are treated is dependent on many factors. Attractiveness is one of those factors. Very attractive people - men and women - are treated differently by men and women alike. Attractiveness dictates how people are perceived and how people behave. Is it fair? Yes and no. Is it fair that a guy who pulls up in a Ferrari is treated differently than if the same guy pulled up in a 1979 Pinto? Your car says something about you. So do your clothes, family, house, and behavior. It just is.

Don't tell me that it's really all that different for guys. I've seen the way women behave around a very attractive man. Most men go their entire lives without being fawned over like that and you know what? We don't bitch about it. We don't write magazine articles, make movies, and teach college courses about it. It just is.

Mrs VA had the revelation quite some time ago about what it is that men love about Hooters. She realized that it wasn't titillation at all. She understood that men go there because it's pretty much the only time that pretty girls will be nice to men like them. Smile at them, touch their shoulder etc. It's sad, but it's true. Most men go their whole lives without ever having pretty girls be friendly to them unless they want something (i.e. money). They just live with it.

So - when someone moves up the "socioattractiveness" (is there a better word?) ladder, things change. Their former peers will treat them differently. Some better, some worse. They themselves will change how they behave, whether they admit it or not, and often they become contemptuous of their former peers and look down on them. They get attention from people they never got it from before - and not all of it is positive. They will also suddenly no longer get attention from people who now find them intimidating.

Physical condition is a factor in attractiveness. It just is. It changes everything and rather than complain about it, most people I know in the lifestyle learn to work with what they have and maximize it and understand that attitude is a huge factor too. Complaining fixes nothing.

Windermere FL

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the one thing I have noticed more than anything else..is how helpful men are now. When I was 24W I rarely had a man hold a door or go out of his way to do anything for me. Now its ridiculous. They hold the door, I had a guy offer to carry my bags to my car at the gas station. It is true, discrimination against the heavy is an accepted thing in this society. However, I personally have been treated more harshly since being thin than I was when I was heavy. I never had women almost WANT to dislike me until now. Given, I do dress in a way that tends to cause people to talk...and yeah, it tickles me. So I am not complaining about it. But it is something I have noticed.

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I don't mind at all G.... I yelled "THIS ONE'S FOR G!" last night....

Well, ok no I didn't, but that would have turned some heads....

It was nice to see some of our old friends... T&L, K&K, etc... it's been too long. We must get out more...

Windermere FL

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If you are beautiful you are the main topic but add a little chubs and the beauty then your suppose to just take what ever is thrown at you."

Or for goodness sakes, talk about being over dramatic. People treat you how you allow them to treat you.

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I guess you'll just have to come on back, PG! VABeach...sigh...we miss the parties and especially the PEOPLE too! I'll live vicariously through you, if you don't mind. G.

San Antonio TX

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sure where was Gina when I was in San Antonio......J/J miss Gina, I know you were very busy at the time!