Female Led Relationship

Ok maybe not an actual bondage bed but we recently went furniture shopping for our new apartment and I found a bed I just had to have.

I couldn’t help but think how amazing it would be to have him bound spread eagle to this bed. I just had to talk him into getting it (it didn’t really take much talking into lol). There are just so many possibilities with this bed. Also the nightstands have usb ports and outlet plugs right in them so I certainly won’t need an extension cord for the wand anymore haha.

(First off, apologies for the lack of posting lately; it’s been very busy here at the LMnC household getting ready for the upcoming move)

It’s so interesting how chastity has changed my life.

I never thought that seeing dents in my cock would make me feel sexy, but they do. I love the look of the marks that my chastity cage leaves on me after I take it off. It reminds me that, even though I might be unlocked, My Lady still owns my cock. She still controls it, whether it’s free from confinement or underneath steel bars. The effect is still there.

It was truly fortunate that My Lady found chastity and decided to give it a try. That decision changed so many things in our lives for the better – our sex life improved, along with our emotional bonds with each other. It’s a part of our lives that we would never take away.

It kind of reminds me of my chastity tattoo. It has become one of my favorites that I have, for that reason – it symbolizes the choice I made to turn control of my sexuality over to ML. She chose the design, she chose the location, and I accepted it… and it couldn’t have been more perfect.

It’s so perfect, sometimes I think to myself: were we destined for this? Is this exactly how we were meant to be with each other? Were we fortunate, or was this situation blissfully unavoidable?

When I get thoughts like these, I can’t help but think of my “chastity scar.”

That right there, is where the base ring of my chastity cage sits. It’s very faint, but you can see the skin is raised very slightly and barely discolored. It’s not a major injury or anything, it doesn’t even hurt or cause discomfort. It’s the result of my fairly large cock struggling against the bars and ring of my chastity cage. I never really expected it to happen, but now it’s a part of me.

It’s funny how chastity has changed me – from the “in the moment” feelings, to the changes I hoped would occur, and even those changes that I never could have expected. It’s also amazing how pretty much all of these changes are for the better.

I just thought this was something fun to share. Every day when cagedmonkey gets dressed and gets himself socks, he opens the dresser drawer and finds a lovely little reminder of who he belongs to. A few little things inside the sock drawer as a way to remember who controls his sexual pleasure, who controls his cock, who keeps it locked up in a cage to use when she pleases. I think it’s nice that, not only does he have his Jail Bird on every day to remind him, he also gets that unspoken visual treat, knowing he wears that collar for me and is plugged whenever I want him to be

So today is Valentine’s Day, and it’s been far from the best of days. ML and I woke up to some family drama – nothing too terrible and not involving our immediate family, but serious nonetheless. And it kinda went downhill from there, culminating in a burst water pipe thanks to a week of mega-freezing temperatures.

If the ceiling fell in, it wouldn't be a surprise.

It’s been a rough day. I’ve already started working on getting drunk, and I doubt ML will be far behind me. It’s just one of those days that you want to be over and move on from.

It’s funny, though… it’s still Valentine’s Day, and we both found time in our horrible day to show our love for each other. I am really blessed to be married to a woman like her: someone who can make me smile on even the worst days. Someone who I know is on my side, no matter how bad things get. Someone who is a partner in parenting, a partner in love, and a partner in life.

If this sounds like this post is turning into one of those “I love my wife so much,” corny, romantic, Valentine’s Day posts… well, you’re right. Got a problem with that? Didn’t think so.

Wishing a VERY Valentine’s Day to everyone out there – for the few hours that are left, anyway. I hope that no matter how bad things get, that you look ahead with open eyes, open arms, and an open heart.

This past weekend was quite an intense experience. ML and I both agreed that we were craving some D/s play time, so we decided to turn my three day weekend into a “full submission” weekend. I will admit that the concept of multi-day play was more difficult than I expected – the degree of my submission seemed to wane slightly as the weekend went on, however I do feel that having the kids around the house contributed to this also.

Friday started off pretty much as you’d expect from reading ML’s rules – I spent a few minutes pleasing My Lady’s pussy with my tongue before it was time to get up and get the kids ready for school. My cock was aching in its cage as she softly moaned, obviously in no immediate hurry. She didn’t even demand and orgasm from me… sometimes that’s even more frustrating for me: the fact that she can cum anytime she wants, but sometimes chooses not to (meanwhile, I’m desperate to cum, but have no choice but not to).

When it was time for me to wake up – or, should I say, when My Lady allowed me to get out of bed – I was immediately started on my water-drinking program. ML instructed me to drink two large cups of water with breakfast (quickly reaching half of my minimum quota in only one meal), and to follow that with a cup of coffee. I could already see that she had plans to test the limits of my bladder, and that those limits would be tested very quickly.

I finished my drinks as ML did homeschool work with our daughter. As I sat watching TV, I received a text message from none other than ML:

Go in the bathroom right now and unlock yourself, stroke that big thick cock of mine to three edges. Then come out and drink another cup of water.

I was happy to be unlocked, but I was also extremely frustrated after the three edges. The worst thing, though, was standing in the bathroom and feeling the urge to pee starting to build, yet not being able to relieve myself. By the time I finished my third cup of water, I could feel the need to go getting even stronger.

I snuck at text message to ML, asking if her “subby hubby” could use the rest room, and got the following response:

You can go when I get back.

Before I was able to ask, ML called to me from the other room and said that she was going out to run some errands with our daughter. “How long will you be gone?” I asked.

“I’m not sure,” she replied with a wicked smile. I squirmed on the couch just a bit, and she chuckled. She leaned down to give me a kiss, and whispered in my ear, “I want you to edge that cock every fifteen minutes while I’m gone.” Then she reached down and gave my hardening cock a squeeze before she was off and out the door.

It didn’t take me long to go from handing it ok to being somewhat uncomfortable with the need to go pee. The combination of a full bladder and the repeated edging were taking its toll on my ability to manage my “needs.” About 45 minutes after ML left, I got another text from her:

I hope you are still drinking your water. I’d hate to come home and find out you weren’t following my instructions. 🙂

Her command was clear. Her intentions, not so much. Did she want me to have to piss in my pants? To have to sit in it and wait for her to come home so I could clean myself and properly relieve myself? I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answer, so instead I asked how long it would be until she got back.

I got no response.

So I sat there – slowly progressing towards agony as my bladder screamed for relief, continuing to make the problem worse by drinking more water, and increasing the building pressure with repeated edges… and it was all because it was exactly what My Lady wanted from me. I waited another hour, checking the driveway, waiting for her to come home. I could think of nothing else but when would she get home. I’m sure this is precisely what she wanted me to be thinking.

Just as I was about to give up on holding it in, ML ‘s car pulled into the driveway. I was so happy to see her so I could use the bathroom. Of course, she took her sweet time exiting the car and walking up to the house, pushing me just a little farther. When she came in the house, I begged her to use the restroom. Mercifully, she allowed me to. It was such a relief to be able to pee after needing to go so badly for so long.

A knock on the door broke me out of my “ahhhhhhhh” moment. My Lady called to me through the door. “Three more edges before you come out, darling,” she said, “and plug your ass, as well… if you are a good boy, I might let you take it out before bed.”

This weekend cagedmonkey and I have discussed and agreed that it will be a full submission weekend. We’ve had full submission days and weekend before but not to the level I am planning to take this one. I have written a list of rules that he will follow. If he forgets or does not follow one of the rules, he will be earning demerits, so to speak. For each rule that goes unfollowed, at any time, I will mark it down. For every mark he has on Sunday evening he will receive 1 swat with my paddle. Mmmm cannot wait to spank that sexy little ass, even if he has no demerits! 🙂

Starting today, cagedmonkey will do anything I ask him to without question. It may be as simple as getting me a drink to following me in the other room, eating my pussy and giving me and orgasm. I have complied a list of rules that I want followed. Some of these things we already do but not to the extent we are doing them this weekend. It’s not that easy to have these kinds of rules in place everyday with young children in the house. This weekend it is required he find a way to follow each and every rule.

Here is my rule list:
1. No matter what I ask or tell him he must answer with “Yes, ma’am” without question or comment.

2. Every morning, he is to wake me, kiss my lips tell me “Good Morning, Ma’am” and then eat my pussy before we get out of bed.

3. He is required to drink 64oz of water each day – plus anything else I tell him to drink or that he asks to, when I tell him to.

4. He is to only use the bathroom when I allow him to. He may ask to use it but he must ask in a way that is pleasing to me. (Ex. May your loving subby hubby use the bathroom now?)

5. He is to kiss me and then ask anytime he needs or wants to leave a room. (Ex. May I go to the kitchen and….)

6. He is to eat what and when I tell him to eat and if he wants something other than that he must ask appropriately.

7. He will be required to wear the small or large nJoy butt plug any time I tell him to, for however long I tell him to.

8. He will be caged, uncaged, stroked, etc at my discretion and will stop what he is doing immediately and go do what ever I tell him when I tell him.

I’m sure there are a few little things here or there that we already do that I haven’t added to this list. I wrote this list here so we both know what to expect from each other and we know exactly what rules I will be enforcing and keep track of for punishment.

Plus it’s a bonus that I get to share these with all of you. I hope that you guys get a chance sometime to have your own full submission weekend… Or even a day. It’s so lovely to feel so powerful. Like CM mentioned in his last post, it’s not a way we could live constantly everyday because I would feel like I was waaaaaaay too micromanaging but I do love these periodic times we get to explore and enjoy this!

Thank you to everyone commenting, emailing and following along! 2016 sure is going to be an exciting time for all of us! 🙂

I actually have a three day weekend, which is pretty amazing. Part of my plans include being lazy, playing lots of video games (there’s a Super Mario Maker level bouncing around in my head, and I’ve only just begun exploring the Fallout 4 wasteland), but a good portion of my weekend will be spent submitting to My Lady.

ML and I haven’t had a “deep submission” day in a little while, and today we are jumping in with a full weekend’s worth of it. I’m actually very excited about it; it’s a very intense experience to submit completely to ML, and I’m sure it will become more and more intense over multiple days. This will actually be our first “multi-day” play session – the last time we wanted to do something like this, it was unexpectedly interrupted. God willing, we won’t have to deal with anything like that this time around.

ML and I are going to really up the ante on how much control she has over me this weekend – I will be following her instructions on when and what to eat and drink, be subjected to bathroom limits at her discretion, endure any teasing, and perform and sexual servitude that she requires.

This could end up being very intense. Both ML and I agree that this type of living would never work for us permanently, but as a limited-time play session it could be very fun to explore the potential of this arrangement.

ML and I have asked each other that at least three times already today, as we think about what this New year holds for us. We are expecting so much change in the next twelve months (we’ll be moving into a new house, as well as adding some exciting new features to our blog), but many things will stay the same (we will both continue to be horny fuckers who can’t keep our hands off each other).

And, oh yeah, that other important thing… My Lady is going to deny me orgasms for the entire year.

ML and I have been taking the last week to enjoy just being free from worrying about an accidental cum, having some good hot sex and throwing in some romantic love making just for the hell of it. 🙂 I’ve had more orgasms in the past week than I’ve had over the past few months – which doesn’t say a lot, considering I was denied since the end of October. But in the back of our minds the whole time was that one thought – “Are we really insane for trying this?”

It hasn’t really hit either of us yet that my orgasm last night was the last one I’m going to have for a VERY long time. ML doesn’t have to worry about that, she’ll be cumming whenever she wants, with my help or without it. But she does have to deal with the fact that I won’t be cumming, since she does actually like it. I, on the other hand, am going to be suffering through it. The only question is how long will it take me to truly want this to end.

Looking ahead to the looming start of my next period of orgasm denial – longer than I have ever been denied, longer than I ever thought I would be – has got me thinking about a few things. I’ve been thinking about the difference between what I want vs. what I need, as well as what it means to truly submit to My Lady.

Many of our readers out there (and ML, as well!) would agree that it is not easy being ML’s sub: it is not easy to be locked in chastity, it is not easy to be teased so intensely, and it is not easy to be held in strict orgasm denial throughout it all. She is a special and unique keyholder, and it takes a special and unique level of commitment and determination to endure her treatment. I’ve been questioning my level of commitment to submitting to ML lately, mainly because of certain aspects of our initial chastity agreement.

Way back when we started living this chastity lifestyle (over… 2 years ago? Holy shit, it was over two years ago!), we crafted a chastity agreement that allowed us both to have input on how our FLR would take shape. The spirit of that agreement guides every aspect of our D/s dynamic, even if we don’t follow each and every clause to the letter (for example, it’s been a long time since we’ve written in our communication book, only because we’ve grown to be so comfortable communicating with each other directly). One of the clauses that ML has been very gracious to uphold has been the use of the “Maybe Day.”

To explain the Maybe Day clause quick and simple: ML gives me a date when she plans to let me cum next, and will let me know if she decides to push me significantly past that date. She can choose whatever date she wishes, and can choose to extend it for any reason, but she is required to let me know when it will be or how much longer I will have to wait.

Looking back on it, I wanted to put that clause in our agreement because of my trust issues. When things were difficult between ML and me, there was never any telling when our next sexual encounter would be. I was scared that ML’s interest might fade once again if there was no date to hold her accountable. I needed even just a small guarantee that I wasn’t going to be left and forgotten about. I wasn’t ready for such an open-ended situation.

I think I’m ready for that now.

Over the past two years, I can’t remember too many nights where ML and I weren’t sexual in some way with each other. I even recently posted about how just a knowing glance across the room can be our way of “having sex.” The level of passion is certainly there, and it’s stronger than it’s ever been. I don’t think I need to be worried that ML will lose sexual interest in me anymore. I probably have to be more worried about ML driving me insane with TOO MUCH sexual attention!

With My Lady’s agreement, I would like to do away with the concept of Maybe Day for good. I realize that this opens me up for denial periods longer than I’d ever expect with absolutely no warning whatever, but I am ready to submit to her that deeply.

(This post is the first that ML will be hearing of these thoughts, so I am very curious to see what her reaction is. Wish me luck!)

I get questions all the time from other wives or girlfriends who have their guys in chastity. Some of the most frequently asked questions are about how I keep things fresh, how I keep him teased, how I remind him of my control over his cock. Honestly, I’ve said it before, chastity is not a “lock it and leave it” thing. Chastity takes a little work on the keyholders part. Unless of course it’s your kink to be locked up and the key tossed away never to be used again. That is certainly not how most… no, all, of the guys I know want it. They want to feel the control, the tease, the denial. They do not want to be locked up and forgotten about. So, how do I possibly make time to keep him teased and denied and reminded of my control?

A lot of this is mental, so there is that. The words and phrases I choose, how I say something, it all helps in reminding cagedmonkey who controls him and his sexual pleasure… Or torment! Then again, much of this is physical, too. There really, truly is a need to feel the physical control. Not that we need to be constantly stroking and edging our guys – though I’m sure they’d love that – but we do need to remind them physically. For those of us using chastity devices, that’s one constant reminder. He can feel that cage you keep locked on him so it is there to say “hey, she holds the key to your cock.”

Sometimes I have to get creative in my reminders. Since we don’t have a lot of time these days for long D/s sessions I need to find interesting ways to keep the tease and denial going. If you follow us on Twitter, you know, a lot of times I’m sending him pictures of myself and my sexy parts. I’m sending him texts about how horny I am and how I’m masturbating. I make sure to remind him of how lucky I am that I’m not locked in a chastity device and I can give myself an orgasm any time I want.

I’ve decided that our lack of alone time together doesn’t mean our D/s or tease and denial time needs to suffer. This morning after getting hubby’s lunch together, I snuck the small vibrator into the front pocket of his lunch bag. Once he left I texted him instructions to retrieve it and click it to a certain setting and place it under his balls, just far enough behind that it vibrated his prostate, for the drive. After a certain amount of time I had him switch it to another setting and then again another. I had control over him for the entire hour that he drove to work. He was an extremely horny dripping mess by the time he got to work. I love that he had to go into work with messy underwear. My little form of private public humiliation.

This little bit of surprise play completely reminded him of how much I love him and love controlling his sexual pleasure. He could feel my control all the way to work and I’m sure the residual submissive feelings are still with him a few hours later. I love finding ways to keep the kink alive, so to speak, when our alone time is not in abundance. I plan to find other wonderfully simple ways to keep reminding him just who is in control of his cock and his sexual pleasure!