Location: Cleanin' my guns 'cause that's what the voices told me to do

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Muffie's Form of the Month

With many thanks to daughter. No doubt she'll start shooing me away and telling me to go buy a book or something.

This month I'm on the pantoum. I didn't like it when I first saw it. In fact I rather hated it.

daughter could not have picked a more perfect form for me to begin my poetry lessons with. When I write prose I have a goal to reach, an ending to get to. It's a vague one though. The plotting is simple and doesn't take up much effort. I can plot a 75,000 word novel in one paragraph.

Poetry? Thinking of the end while thinking of the beginning is an exercise in circularity. I'm not a linear thinker, but I have become a linear writer. A to B to C to D. The pantoum is a fabulous form because it's A to B to C to B to D to C to D to A. Hurts, doesn't it?

I'm learning two things here. 1, to think of the entire poem and what I want the reader to get from it before I put words to paper and 2, using repetition to create meaning.

Funky. Very funky. Okay, I'll give it a go. There's no specified meter, hmmm? Just the structure and rhyming...

Sub Memory

On gentle morning, I rose with tender breasts.
Their sensitive ache set my mind to wonder
If God had me in one of his Holy Jests
Or if Satan pawned me for malicious plunder.

Their sensitive ache set my mind to wonder
If I've forgotten some grand sexual dance
Or if Satan pawned me for malicious plunder.
In steamy mirror, I give them a glance.

If I've forgotten some grand sexual dance
Then why are they marked and covered with bruises?
In steamy mirror, I give them a glance.
Their judgement aside, I'm the one who muses...

Then why are they marked and covered with bruises?
A quick answer stalls, but pregnant I'm not.
Their judgement aside, I'm the one who muses...
"Which Domme that I know ties a three-sided knot?"

(Oops! Okay, a pantoum it's not. I just missed that last little instruction, Muff. No room for a punch line, huh? Then, it's probably not for me. Here's the corrected version.)

Ache Memory

On gentle morning, I rose with tender breasts.
Their sensitive ache set my mind to wonder
If God had me in one of his Holy Jests
Or if Satan pawned me for malicious plunder.

Their sensitive ache set my mind to wonder
If I've forgotten some grand sexual dance
Or if Satan pawned me for malicious plunder.
In steamy mirror, I give them a glance.

If I've forgotten some grand sexual dance
Then why are they marked and covered with bruises?
In steamy mirror, I give them a glance.
Their judgement aside, I'm the one who muses...

Then why are they marked and covered with bruises?
If God had me in one of his Holy Jests
Their judgement aside, I'm the one who muses...
On gentle morning, I rose with tender breasts.

(Of course, now I see what's so difficult about this form. My last stanza is for shit now. The form this attempt at pantoum has now would be the beginning of where to edit in order to make the poem have a better ending and clearer meaning.

KM, you reminded me of an old exercise for this form. The idea is to write the pantoum quickly within 30 minutes or so. To help, think of a nursery rhyme or short poem. To write this one I used the idea: "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me"

Sticks and Stones

You come fierce and resolute like air conditioning in hell.
Knowing your movement wasted you burn the bluest flame.
Smiling words that slip from sly humor clear as a bell.
Tuning forked tongue shatters ego and maims.

Knowing your movement wasted you burn the bluest flame.
I want to touch you so proud and frightening in your pain.
Tuning forked tongue shatters ego and maims.
Humble and content you scorn my fame and feign.

I want to touch you so proud and frightening in your pain.
My cautions melt off you and pool at your feet.
Humble and content you scorn my fame and feign.
Trampling the curious collection of words into sheets.

My cautions melt off you and pool at your feet.
Smiling words that slip from sly humor clear as a bell.
Trampling the curious collection of words into sheets.
You come fierce and resolute like air conditioning in hell.

I tried doing that 30 minutes exercise SA talked about, but the fact that it's 6.00 AM right now (meaning I'm pre-comatose) combined with me being Portuguese (which means I usually need at least half an hour to come up with an half-decent rhyme in English) led to this exquisite piece. I'll most likely come back in a day or two with a better one...

HOW TO write a pantoum

Scribble, scribble, scribble,
Write down all you can think of.
Onto paper let your soul dribble
And rephrase what you wrote above.

Write down all you can think of,
Erase those thoughts from your mind
And rephrase what you wrote above;
Cross out the words left behind.

Erase those thoughts from your mind.
There's no need now to get shy.
Cross out the words left behind.
And please just give it one more try.

There's no need now to get shy!
Onto paper let your soul dribble,
And please just give it one more try:
Scribble, scribble, scribble...