tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post5400261419577006403..comments2015-06-03T09:22:59.559-07:00Comments on Positive Discipline: Follow Through With ChildrenJane Nelsenhttps://plus.google.com/101249988008866585527noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post-86599224127918062972014-04-21T11:18:52.176-07:002014-04-21T11:18:52.176-07:00I think as parents we suffer guilt no matter what ...I think as parents we suffer guilt no matter what and for as long as we are parents. I have almost 13 year old twins and an almost 15 year old (all girls) and I still feel guilt when I follow through with discipline. But I deal with so much grief and constant repeating if I dont mean business... even at this age. Follow through sucks sometimes, but it has worked for me, with the upbringing of my daughters as well as the children I teach (Im a preschool teacher ages 2-5)I feel guilty at times and want to give in when they say &quot;please please I wont go fast on the bikes and run down my friends again&quot; or with my daughters promising that they will clean their room before their friends come over to hang out, but dont... Telling the 3 year old that he will just have to try again tomorrow on the bike hurts just as much as calling my daugters friends parents to let them know the &quot;playdate&quot; is off... I just have to remind myself that the 3 year old will think twice about racing around the track when I give him another chance come the next day, and my daughter actually does make sure her room is picked up now when her friends come over... and we are all happier when those things happen. <br /><br />Its hard, but in the long run, I have learned time and time again, consistency and follow through really do work and make your life(and yours!) a little easier(but not always <br />less guilt free) Hang in there!! Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post-32344298361322672322014-04-14T11:08:21.728-07:002014-04-14T11:08:21.728-07:00So, I love the idea of follow through. When I stic...So, I love the idea of follow through. When I stick to my guns, and am &quot;encouraging&quot; as you say, by saying &quot;We&#39;ll try again tomorrow&quot;, I&#39;m often met with heartbreaking tearful wails, begging, &quot;NOOOOOOOOO!!! MOM I&#39;M SORRY I PROMISE I WILL BRUSH MY TEETH NOW&quot;. I know that we are supposed to stick to our guns to get the results that we desire, and giving in just teaches them that they can get their way. But do you have any words of support for the feelings that a mama feels when met with the heartbreaking wailing, how to power through that? I feel wired to respond when they and it is such a paradox, that to &quot;listen&quot; (which is really &quot;giving in&quot;) is actually doing them harm, but in the moment it is so difficult. And sometimes I just want the sound to stop.Bettynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post-56435897087922595132012-05-07T09:50:55.398-07:002012-05-07T09:50:55.398-07:00Hey Adventures, personally I see one red flag, the...Hey Adventures, personally I see one red flag, the word &#39;warnings&#39;. I find myself giving warnings, b/c I want the kids to have a chance to listen before experienceing painful consequences. I really try not to warn. I tell them what I&#39;m going to do. In our house, it&#39;s &quot;I leave the door open for girls who are quiet.&quot; and if sh is loud, no warnings, just a closed door. This results sometimes in an epic tantrum, but they usually learn pretty quick that I mean it and listen. I&#39;d also pay very close attention to what your husband does differently than you, then copy him.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post-36127310060548686812012-04-25T05:23:02.384-07:002012-04-25T05:23:02.384-07:00HI &quot;Adventures.&quot; I do not have advice r...HI &quot;Adventures.&quot; I do not have advice regarding the topic of this blog post, but I have a few environmental ideas for you. I have two boys 22 mos apart. They slept in the same room (bunk beds) as toddlers/preschoolers. They were ridiculously silly when it was time to sleep. We went in there many many times to be &quot;firm.&quot; Never worked. Finally, we figured out different sleeping arrangements so that they could each have a room. We made a small &quot;den&quot; into a baby room. My 9 year old daughter still sleeps in that room. Also, just a thought about naps. The oldest boy used to watch a video for &quot;quiet time&quot; so he got a reset without falling asleep. I know Jane may not approve, since it is sort of like using the screen as a babysitter, but it helped him stay in one place during rest time. He still remembers that fondly. On weekends, Daddy would sit with him and cuddle. I&#39;m going to write another post about my challenges with bedtime for my daughter.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8540881439451499604.post-35499886498968289842012-04-19T21:44:48.566-07:002012-04-19T21:44:48.566-07:00My twins have really been giving me a hard time at...My twins have really been giving me a hard time at night. They are 3.5 years old. They party like it&#39;s 1999 after we close the door! They will definitely quiet down if daddy warns them. But even if I am firm (I think) they will continue to play after I give them warnings. If the play is quiet, I&#39;m ok with that. But if it&#39;s loud or disruptive to their bedroom (clothes all over the floor, crib mattresses being dragged around the room), I get pretty irritated. I&#39;ve tried to tell them if they do that again they will not get dessert the next day or their favorite TV show the next day as a consequence for their actions. But that has had limited effectiveness. I&#39;m trying to address the causes as opposed to the symptoms but I&#39;m not sure what those are! Tonight they seem to be riled up and unable to fall asleep - maybe because daddy left today for out of town? I&#39;m also considering whether it&#39;s time to end naps (we currently limit them to one hour). Any solutions/help would be appreciated!The Adventures of Grunty and Chubbshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14576822642103835848noreply@blogger.com