Don’t Criticize Me…Unless I Need It!

I can’t lie…I saw clips from the Golden Globes and I am super happy for the winners and nominees alike. Especially those from my favorite shows and the films that I thoroughly enjoyed watching this year! I applaud you ALL!!

I was (just as many of us were) moved by Meryl Streep’s speech. No, I’m not trying to get into all of the political stuff but this did spark a life lesson for me…

In this political and social landscape, there are many paths to choose. As an artist, there is no difference. Are you going to create art for accolades, in order to make a “comfortable living” (whatever that is to you) or are you creating art because you MUST because you feel that something would be missing from your life if you didn’t? Does your art ignite passion in your heart? Do you feel incomplete without it? Whatever your answer I am learning that it is not so much about what you do but the way in which you choose to do a thing! It becomes less about having a title and more about the relationship one has with another. It’s like seeing a couple that scream at each other when they get mad and a couple who pray together when they get angry. It’s a choice. It’s not always an easy choice to make in the heat of the moment but both can have very different outcomes. (One will at least have your blood pressure sky high!)

In these steps toward my dream, especially in an industry of glamor and perfection, I must remember who I choose to be. A “fluff” artist who gives in to ego and “scream at the track” only expressing my surface-level feelings only or will I dig deep and “pray” on the track allowing my truth to come through? Either way, it is my choice.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” -Will Durant

Just as we all have an option to be a shining example of excellence for our children, friends, co-workers and so forth we also have the option to be a great example for the world at large. Even under the direst circumstances (from teasing to blatant disrespect) there is always a dignified way to handle criticism. Just as there is a dignified way to offer criticism. Criticism in and of itself is not a negative thing…many times its just feedback. In fact, it can help us to gauge our behavior with the world around us. For example, if you were kicking someone’s chair in a movie theater they may turn around and say “Hey, can you stop kicking my chair please?” Does that mean you are a bad person? No, it just means that you were interrupting someone’s life flow and they would like for you to stop that behavior. But we usually don’t like to be corrected or feel that we are being defamed but if the shoe fits then you can at least try it on!

We all have room to grow and many times its takes the world (via relationships) to hold a mirror to our faces. Not that all criticism should be entertained but we tend to know deep down inside if the feedback is relevant or not.

So who do YOU choose to be? A person who screams their way to resolution or prays their way to it? Personally, I choose to handle my “feedback” with grace and “pray” my way to it. I choose to listen (without ego getting in the way) and take the nuggets from it that I can use to help me be a better version of myself. At the end of the day, isn’t that deep down what we all desire to be?

Our Tasks:

Decide who you want to be in life. The “Screamer” or the “Pray-er”? (Feel free to come up with your own terms)

Listen to the “feedback” we have been receiving (desired or not) and see if the “shoes” fits? Does it make sense or not? Adjust accordingly knowing that you were the one who desired to make the change…not to suit someone else but to be your best self!

Give loving “feedback” to others. – Remember that it’s easier to be critical of others so imagine how it would feel if you were in their shoes.