Fun With Asbestos

Asbestos
has been around for over 2000 years and has been used for many wonderful things.
Sadly due to the fact that many people have died because of this wonderful product, it is no longer allowed to be used commerically.
But this site here is so you can take all that asbestos you find at your house, work or kids school and use them in a varity of ways or products that you can't get anywhere else

Saturday, December 31, 2005

Before you go out this new years

I know many people are planning to go a celebrate news years to night and some of those people thinks it cute/funny to dress as a giant baby.

If you are one of these people may I suggest that you use a sheet of asbestos and use it as a diaper.

The reason is that asbestos diapers have saved many a lives on new year's. The reason is that many people get so drunk on new year's that they passout. Which is really bad if you are a smoker or passout with a smoker. Trust me fire + alcohol is never good.

an asbestos diaper will protect you junk if a cigarette (or what ever you are smoking) falls on you.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Thursday, December 22, 2005

asbestos fur coats

Since it’s getting cold in many parts of the country I have decided to sell fake fur coats made out of asbestos. These coats are great because they keep your body heat in and you didn’t aid in the killing of animals to be styles.

Monday, December 19, 2005

t’s beginning to look like an Asbestos Christmas

Well it’s Christmas time again and you know what that means. Yep a bunch of songs with people singing about how they are wishing for a white Xmas. Which is cool and all unless you live somewhere where it doesn’t F’ing snow. But if your like many people that live some where that is way to warm to ever have hopes of seeing anything but a green Christmas don’t worry asbestos is here to help.

How? You may ask.

First of you need to get tons of asbestos dust. If you are wondering where you can get tons of asbestos dust I suggest going to the demolitions of old buildings.

Second fill Asbestos dust into a snow machine or if you can find a snow machine a vacuum with a reverse setting.

Finally go to the area that you want to make the snow effect and turn on the snow machine (or vacuum on reverse)

And now you have asbestos snow.

Every once in a while I like to do this trick in California and sometimes even Hawaii.

shift flour, nutmeg, peppermint, ginger, baking soda and asbestos together in a bowl. With each shift throw in a pinch of cinnamon.

When done pour in the molasses and rum at the same time. When done whip batter for 3 minutes.

dump in sticks of butter and mix batter.

when done place cookie dough onto cookie tray. If you want you can make cookies into shapes (ie Asbestosbread men).

cook in oven for around 8-10 minutes.

now you have a tasty holiday treat and if you want you should leave a tray out for Santa. He loves Asbestos Holiday Cookies because of the fact it helps makes his innards fire proof and when you jump down peoples chimineas you need as much protect as one can get in case someone forgot to turn the fire place off that night.