Higher Standards

Ok. Mr. Trump…you keep saying that Bill Clinton’s affairs should play a role in this campaign. What do you think that role should be?

Well, clearly Bill Clinton’s affair were terrible…horrible…probably the worst affairs in the history of history—

Donald.

Oh yeah—but I don’t want to talk about how horrible Bill Clinton was. And really, can you believe how bad he was? Or how bad Hillary was? I mean—she’s the worst. They way she attacked those poor women. Just the—

Ahem.

Yes, yes—but I’m not going to talk about that. That’s just a distraction. The American people want to hear—they need to hear about how my policies are going to make America great again. I mean—when the alternative is policies from a women who is probably not even faithful, because…

Donald—policies.

Right, right, right. Policies—talk about policies.

And?

Oh they’re the best. I have the greatest polices. Believe me. Man, I’m killing this. This is going to be the best debate ever.