That's what my uncle did, shotgun. But there was a big mess. And he did it at a friends' house. I mean great so his kid can't see it but come on man, its just a friend! they're not supposed to have to deal with the mess. That's not what friends are for. Keep that for the family. Or how about just doing it outside, less cleaning. Less having to look at that stain on your carpet and remember what that's from. I mean id hate having to change my furniture or carpet just cause a "friend" came to kill themselves in my house. See that's NOT what friends do, ruin your carpet with their brain chunks. Come on.

Canadians eat sausage, drink a lot of beer, and have big dogs. They like to go to dog parks and pick up chicks there. Invite them over for steak and prawns, hang out on the deck with your fancy beer, wax philosophical, talk about hockey, and canoeing.

Yeah that's canadians. Not the french kind. I seldom ate sausage when i ate meat, i hate beer (when i drank it as a teen, to get drunk, it was fairly fancy though), i never had a dog (except as a kid). i rarely talk about hockey and only canoed a handful of times.

I remember when i went to chicago in 2000 people ordered a deep dish with canadian bacon and i had to ask ammy what canadian bacon was. I'd never heard of it...

Other things that make me not very canadian:

My English-American gf had to tell me who Stompin' Tom Connors was, I was like 32

I've never seen the Mckenzie brothers movie (i can't even remember the name right now)

I don't own a Tragically Hip or Rush album

I have decent taste in clothes (well ok i haven't always plus that's an old stereotype from back when canadians were a bit more square...)

I haven't skated since i was like 11 and never was good at it (in the same vein, i havent played street hockey since i was a kid)

I hate winter

Things that make me canadian:

I like maple syrup on everything

I have seen Slap Shot at least twelve times (less than most but you know, but that's because they made a french canadian dubbed version which is potentially better than the english version)

I am sanctimonious

i think The Littlest Hobo theme song is the best TV show theme song ever written

Despite barely actually watching hockey (even though i discuss it and follow it somewhat) i tend to get very emotional when we win the gold medal

I want to move to another city. I want to live in a big city, with a bunch of people, make enough money to live by myself. I want to completely start over and meet new people. I'm tired of being isolated. I don't want to go home and get stoned and play video games again. I don't want to go to shitty dive bars to play poker because I can't find anything better to do here. And all of this is so hopeless. I don't and probably won't have enough money saved up to just get up and go somewhere. I am unskilled and pretty much wasted the last 8 years of my life and it's so depressing thinking about these wants, and thinking about that excitement, and thinking how much it could drive me, but no that it's basically impossible. I'm stuck here with people and things I don't want in my life.

Cities don't necessarily fix all this. I lived the first 21 years of my live in the boonies. Like the real boonies. I hated the isolation the last like 6 years. I moved to montreal finally (well the suburbs for a few years first). I did have a fairly active social life for some years. But now it was ten years in mtl last december and I'm still as isolated as i was . Why? Because turns out places didn't make me lonely, my social anxiety problems and my personality and low tolerance of others makes me lonely and isolated.

Its not always where you are but sometimes who you are. As a teen I used to dream my life would be amazing an exciting in a city. I was very wrong.