Meanwhile, the rest of us have been commanded by Jesus (or something) to go forth on Black Friday, and murder each other in Wal-Mart parking lots. With guns. Plus! Rupert Murdoch properties will tell you "violence is breaking out all over Amerika" because fear sells.NY Post

The old joke about "all hat and no cattle" was invented either by Texans or Montanans (no one is really sure) and was often applied to George W. Bush. However, this is 2016, and the term seems to apply to this Christmas tree ornament. It is "popular" apparently.

The All-American Boy has been found competent to stand trial. NY TImes And if that is not disgusting enough, The Internet Archive has saved a copy of his very disgusting website.

"A council has been swamped with suggestions after asking the public to give its new gritting machine a name. The local authority tweeted a picture of the brand new Mitsubishi Fuso and invited suggestions for a name.The
idea came after the Natural Environment Research Council asked for
ideas for a name for their new vessel - and Boaty McBoatface emerged as a
clear favourite.

"Now Oldham Council has received ideas including
Gritter Garbo after the classic Hollywood actress, Gritty Gritty Bang
Bang after the classic Disney film, Gritney Spears, and of course Gritty McGritface.
Among others are I’m a Celebrity, Grit Me Out of Here, Usain Salt and Grit Expectations."