There is smoke coming out of the china cabinet! You had better wash that bedspread, there is dirt all over it. Is that cat real? The cat question was a bit encouraging since she did not simply assume that it was real.

She accepted my offer to feed her when she just couldn’t seem to negotiate her bowl of “Little Bites” shredded wheat. She had managed most of the yogurt on her own. She again had trouble getting the straw to work as I tried to get her to finish the Miralax in water. That is one of the most important items in her medication regimen. At first she wanted to drink without the straw, but there was no way to get her head erect enough for the water to make it in her mouth. In the hospital, when she was most disconnected at night, she couldn’t manage to suck on the straw, but blew through it instead.

There have been some moments of lucid interactions. As she was lying down for a nap (about an hour after getting up), she mentioned lisiening to the “radio” meaning the book on CD that we were listening to on the trip.

By the way, she did sleep better after the applesauce last night. It is a good thing. I was running out of patience with the constant needs every few minutes. There were more times up throughout the night, but there was enough time between them to get some sleep. She did get up pretty early this morning.

I am starting this post early in the day in hopes that I can get to bed earlier tonight. Of course, my hope is that Mary Ann will be able to get to sleep at a reasonable hour and stay asleep other than a few trips to the commode during the night tonight.

It is now mid-afternoon. It continues to be a very difficult day. After her nap, during which I wrote the paragraphs above, we attempted lunch. There was a piece of Glory Days’ Pizza left from yesterday. That is her favorite. I cut it up for her, and she managed a few bites of it with her fork. Normally, she has no trouble eating small pieces of pizza with a fork. Finally, I needed to help her. As she had yesterday, she tried to take a drink of Pepsi and set the cup down on top of the pizza on her plate, seemingly unaware that she was doing so.

She ate a few bites of her favorite green Jello, Cool Whip and cottage cheese salad that Mary brought yesterday. After a two or three spoonfuls she was done. I offered her a chocolate chip cookie. She could not negotiate holding it and getting it to her mouth. I helped her eat half the cookie.

We drove over to Doug and Marikay’s so that I could get a much needed haircut. She sat with her head down during that time. When we drove back by the coffee shop, I offered to use a buy one get one free Dairy Queen Blizzard coupon. She just couldn’t answer intelligibly. I concluded that she did not want any. She would not have been able to handle eating it at the DQ, but we could have brought them home.

Moments ago, she wanted to go to the bedroom for some reason of which I was not aware. When we got there, she wanted to get dressed for bed and was irritated that I didn’t realize what she thought was obvious. I explained that it was only 3:30pm, and she recognized that it would be too soon to go to bed.

She is now listening to the book on CD that we started on our trip to Hot Springs. What a dramatically different place we are now, less than a week from the time we were enjoying there. I just asked if she had any pain or anything was hurting. She said clearly that she was not hurting in any way. Her head remains hanging, but she seems to be awake. I don’t know if she is able to follow the book, but at least at the moment she is remaining in the chair.

I continue to hope that at some point she will snap out of it. Right now, we would not be able to manage going out to eat in a restuarant, one of our main treats. This is a whole new place in this trek, a place we would rather not be.

So far this is a pretty distressing day. She is lying down again. It is about 4:45pm. I asked her earlier if it would be okay for us to go to the Parkinson’s Support Group tonight. She connected with the question and said it would be. Then a while later she fell while I was on two phone calls, one a survey from our Financial folks on the land line and another on the cell phone from our Son who is on vacation with his family in Colorado. They had just seen an American Bald Eagle as they were driving along. She decided she did not want to go to the Support Group meeting. She said she needed to lie down. There had apparently been lots of drainage from her mouth the last time she was napping. I hadn’t noticed just how much it was earlier. I changed the bed and have her bedding and pillow in the washing machine at the moment.

I am writing lots today, I suppose on account of the need just to talk about what it going on. This is a new level of need. At moments like this there is a sense of isolation that comes, recognizing that even with all the support we have from so many wonderful people, ultimately we are on our own as we deal with this. No one can do it for us. Others have lives full of needs that they must deal with.

I am, of course, confident of the Lord’s Presence. Even the Lord experienced a sense of isolation. It is helpful to recognize that kinship.

On a lighter note, I forgot to spring the live trap this morning after there was no raccoon to be found in it. A squirrel managed to trip it while foraging for seed that had fallen into the trap. Is he going to have a story to tell! He moved like lightning when I opened the door to the trap.

There may be more to tell as the evening wears on, but I will post this now and write more later or tomorrow.

Addendum: Mary Ann got up from her third nap today just long enough to change into her pajamas. The sheets needed to be changed again on account of the drainage from her mouth. The washer and dryer are getting a workout. Logic says that tonight will be a restless night since there were three naps today. I guess my hope is that she is sleeping off the confusion and will soon return to normal.

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