Monday, July 20, 2009

Hey bitches. I'm at the beach, wondering where Brother wandered off to, and cooling down after a fairly lame yoga class and gym trip. Often it doesn't occur to me just how bananas I am, especially regarding my generally hyper behavior when I'm out and about. (When I'm at home couched, I'm about as mellow as mellow gets; green, not yellow.)

I was on the eliptical today at the beach club's gym—lots of older snowbirds now, which we'll get to later—after a supposedly 'relaxing' yoga session. Ha. If yoga did the trick, I'd have a clean toxicity test to impress you all with. Anyway, I'm on the eliptical, book on the screen, phone in hand. And it's the one where the arms move. So I'm on my Sidekick, on FB, emailing and alternately reading. This older dude, mid-sixties stops in front of me and—slowwwwwly, this is The South—starts to speak.

"Were you just texting on your phone?"

I feared that he was an undercover agent for The Nazi Beach Club Gym Patrol who were gunning for me—I'll also get to that incident, later. This place is so not Equinox.

"Uh, e-mailing actually. Have to multitask."

"Emailing, reading and working out? You don't have to make it look so easy."

Shit, how else do people get stuff done during the day? Or ever, for that matter, if they aren't triple-tasking? Uh, where was I going?

Whatever. I don't really feel like writing at the moment, but we've got lots of photos from Brother's big 30th Bday Weekend. (Though mine still trumps his—he didn't have the Bermudian Police searching for him.)

After dinner at one of the few posh/trendy restos here, Grey-Goosed-up mom exclaimed outside: "Ooo-hhhhh! I have my shoes on the wrong feet!"

"What?"

"I slipped them off under the table and I guess I put them back on the wrong feet!"

Vodka Mom is fun as hell—I know all you real-life-friend readers can attest to that.

Looking at her handiwork:

Inspired by Alison's July 4th shenanigans, foremost of which were "Suck and Blow" type of shooter things—don't get me started—we'd decided to soak a watermelon with vodka for the party Sat night. After I told mom about it over July 4th, she was all over that shit.

I mean, look at her go:

This is why Saveira and I get along so well:

As you can tell, a pretty intense start to the weekend. More later; you can see album I and album II on Facebook. Tessie Lou says, "Ta."