Thursday, September 14, 2006

it's been a while...

it's been a while...

i've always wondered if e day will come when i wake up 1 day & feel that live is nt worth living anymore...

it's always a ritual especially during crucial exams tt there'll always be this thought at e back of my head throwing at me a whole lot of "what ifs" & then trying to convince myself how painless it wld be if i could just gather e courage to walk to e middle of e road or just leap frm a building.

smthing inside me tells me tt if i can't do well, i'll just snap. my results hasn't been fantastic since PSLE. fantastic as in it hasn't been what i had expected it to be considering ppl used to praise me & say how "clever" i was. or maybe it was them tt i had believed myself to be clever & cld score straight As or stuff... yet e results were just nice enough to get me to where i wanted to go...

now as i sit in e exam hall trying to figure out half e time what e hell is going on, i just keep telling myself tt it's just e last lap & there can be no more mistakes.

i just wanna move on frm this horrible sch, leave all these horrible ppl behind & get into a uni.i need to support my family, i need to get a good job to support my family.

smtimes u can't wait for what life has in store for u. other times u look at all e weirdos u've met & u wonder how much more life can have for u when u've had ur fill of weird ppl & crazy events.

1 comment:

Anonymous
said...

You are not alone... deep inside everyone needs love and feels down or sad sometimes :-)Remember, when there is no [outside] hope, YOU have the obligation to find it within yourself! Surrender yourself with positive[like-minded]ppl and always keep faith in life and love.

양사민

“It is said an eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him with the words, 'And this, too, shall pass away.' How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!” ~Abraham Lincoln