Monday, November 17, 2008

Huh.

Date with Mr. Neon tonight. I'm washing my sheets and I don't even know why. So they'll be nice and comfy when I come home alone to sleep, I spose. Gotta take care of your own needs, right?

Anyway, when I'm not getting laid or causing Internets Drama I gotta fall back on the recurring cheap stuff like Cosmocking, but that's really only good once a month. So: Search Term Craziness! These are all search terms people used to find this blog.

pervocracy "i measured my hands"This wouldn't be so weird except that there were thirty-two searches for it, spread out pretty evenly over a month, not all from the same person, and averaging eight minutes on the site. Huh. Anyway, if it's a topic of great interest, my hands are about 3.25" wide at the first knuckle, 8" long from wrist joint to tip of middle finger, and 1" thick. I wear Medium size surgical gloves. OOH BABY TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOUR HAND SIZE...?

nose cumcum nose"Cum nose" wins by a hair, but these two are the second and third most popular searches after "pervocracy." Ahchoo.

"i'm not a slut, i'm just"...misunderstood!

"started dating at 25"Better late than never, I guess.

babypop vrilI searched for this, and yeah, it doesn't mean anything. At all. It's not even a misspelling of something that means something. This, my friends, is a phrase that does not exist anywhere on the indexed Internet. That gives it magic powers. (Well, it's indexed now, so don't use this one. Make up your own.)

cosmo should women swallow cum?Why are you asking them? Anyway, Cosmo would never say "cum." They'd say, like "those unavoidable manly fluids" or "the not-so-fresh side effects of nookie." Something prudish yet icky.

cum evolutionIn this specific case, I'm a Creationist.

mara jade bdsm"Ooh, not the lightsaber, Daddy!"

positive things for swallowing cum"See, honey, as this PowerPoint presentation clearly shows, there are at least 17 synergistic win-wins..."

what kind of girl swallows cumSome of every kind, man. You'd be surprised.