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A Better Way to Have Sex? (Anonymous post on a gardening forum)

‘The Intelligent Gardener’ changed how I garden. My garden is more productive and its produce more flavorful than ever before.

‘Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow’ (CPA) changed how I have sex with my wife of 25 years. My marriage is stronger and my personal well-being higher than ever before.

CPA lays out the case for intercourse without orgasm. CPA lays out the science that orgasm causes neurohormonal imbalances that last up to two weeks. Those neurohormonal imbalances can trigger a wide-range of emotional responses: impatience, pettiness, a sense of lacking, a bit of paranoia, moodiness, etc. Because the emotional responses happen over the course of two weeks or so, few pinpoint their cause to orgasm. I certainly never guessed that orgasm could have emotional impacts on me out to two weeks.

CPA lays out the case that the ‘emotional rollercoaster’ that results from orgasm is the cause of much discord in relationships. I certainly always had problems, despite my best efforts, at being patient and compassionate at all times with my wife. Now, I know why that probably was the case. And, I now have a sense of why, it seems to me, my wife was petty and nagging with me much of the time.

Middle-aged guys know about the physical dangers of orgasm: coaches used to tell us to avoid sex the night before a big game, as our ‘knees would be weak’ the following day. From personal experience, during my days in the business world, I learned to avoid sex or masturbation the night or two before a big presentation or negotiation, as I felt stronger and more confident when I was ‘continent.’

But, I had never heard about the emotional dangers of orgasm.

CPA has a series of vignettes at the end of its chapters in which it shows how intercourse without orgasm (IWO) is a part of many spiritual and religious traditions, such as Taoism, early Christianity, and Hinduism. There is even a book written out of work performed back in the ‘40s and ‘50s that lays out the case – convincing to me – that Revelation, in the New Testament, is coded language for how to gain control of our emotions by clearing our ‘seven churches,’ i.e., spinal energy centers or chakras.

IWO is, to me, far superior to ‘ordinary’ orgasmic intercourse. After IWO, I feel refreshed and revitalized. I am energetic. I am confident. I am alert. I am creative. I am funny. I am powerful, yet compassionate. I am patient. I am ready to be productive and helpful.

True to stereotype, ordinary orgasmic intercourse left me tired, ready to roll over and sleep.

IWO allows me and my wife to have intercourse daily, typically. Occasionally, I am treated to a second round of daily intercourse.

We are all familiar with ‘peak’ orgasm, the goal in ordinary orgasmic sex. In IWO, one experiences – not always, but here and there – ‘valley’ orgasm, instead. Peak orgasm is short-lived and very powerful; valley orgasm is long-lived and enjoyable, though not powerful.

In IWO, on a day-to-day basis, one savors deep, prolonged penetration, with alternations between stillness, slow movement, and fast movement. Male erections come and go, and female lubrication runs very high. Males typically use lubrication (e.g., food oils, such as almond or grapeseed) on their penis to allow ‘soft entry,’ i.e., vaginal penetration without erection. For me, IWO is heaven on earth.

When I first heard of the concept of IWO from a friend, a year or two before reading about it in CPA, I said to myself, ‘That is nuts! Why have sex, then?’ I was directed to CPA, indirectly, through a reference to it in a YouTube (YT) video. The YT video laid out the terrible physical toll – impotence, premature ejaculation — of habitually viewing porn. I was addicted to Internet porn. I was experiencing both impotence and premature ejaculation. The YT video pointed to the likely culprit – my habitual viewing of Internet porn — and the potential cure: breaking my porn habit.

Like every male, I had tried to kick my Internet porn habit many, many times. Probably like most, I always dismally failed. But, after reading CPA and by avoiding orgasm and the ensuing emotional roller-coaster, it was relatively easy to break my Internet porn habit. It was amazing.

Me, there are few ‘conspiracy theories’ that I reject. One I have not read, but makes sense to me, is that The Cabal that now controls our world pushes orgasm on us, despite old teachings and wisdom to the contrary. TV, movies, books, medical and psychological establishment, schools, and churches (at least the Roman Catholic Church, which views sex without procreative purpose as sinful) all promote orgasm. Many of those institutions also promote terrible food and routine use of pharmaceuticals. I think these things – and other Cabal tools — deplete our bodies, our minds, our willpower, and our ‘fighting’ ability. I think The Cabal views orgasm as a highly effective tool to make us better slaves.

If you are interested, you can find CPA at Amazon. And, the author of CPA, Marnia Robinson, maintains a wonderful website, http://reuniting.info/. Like the ‘Soil and Health’ Yahoo group, there is a most helpful set of posters who field questions and share personal experiences at Marnia’s website. And, as with the ‘Soil and Health Library,’ Marnia has electronic copies of a number of classic texts available on her website.

I am most thankful to Steve and Erica for the work they did in ‘The Intelligent Gardener.’ It has positively affected my health and life and that of my family. I am most thankful to Marnia and the work that she and her husband did in ‘Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow.’ It has positively affected my health and marriage and life.