Not that it matters — because in ten days, Zorp the Surveyor will arrive to burn off our flesh with his volcano mouth and use our melted faces as fuel (Ed note: All hail Zorp) – but popular men’s interest website AskMen.com recently tallied over 2.4 million votes to determine the top 99 most desirable women of 2013, as determined by you, the people. And wouldn’t you know it, none other than inaugural UFC Rondaweight champion Ronda Rousey placed an astonishing 43rd on said list. I guess this WMMA thing is catching on after all.

Beating out rival Kim Kardashian (#98), as well as such top-shelf hotties as Heidi Klum (#61), Olivia Wilde (#54), and Scarlett Johansson (#45) and falling just ten spots behind first lady Michelle Obama, it was an impressive showing for the women’s champ to say the least. Based on all of our recent Rousey-related posts, I’m guessing most of your reactions are going to be something along the lines of “WTF is this shit?! I find hotter women scrubbing the cobblestone sidewalks at night whilst travelling from my vacation home to my second vacation home!” but does anyone honestly feel she deserves her ranking on the list, if not a higher one? And what the fuck is a Jenna Marbles (#90)?

Personally, I’m just upset that Tina Fey (#80) landed some 73 spots behind Kristen Stewart (#7), whose pouty, suicidal-girl-next-door routine couldn’t arouse me if I had a fistful of Viagra, a fifth of Jack, and six minutes left on this earth. Also, I wish Michelle Jenneke was less a track star and more a sex slave chained to a pipe in my basement, but I digress.

You can check out the list in its entirety here. But before I go, I must ask, where would you have placed Sofia Vergara between #1 and whatever is better than #1?

Cagepotato Comments

Showing 1-25 of comments

Thanks Danga! Not only am I out of kleenex now, but I got that fucking Sabrina song stuck in my head.

NomadRip- December 12, 2012 at 9:35 am

Jenna Marbles should have been much higher on the list.

intercept440- December 12, 2012 at 8:08 am

even though i would pummeld her orifices with my schvantz...i agree she doesnt belong on the list...actually about only 15 chicks on the whole list belong there...there are hotter chicks in my small town of 10,000 people than these skeevy bitches

Kristen Stewart's vagina sunk the Titanic. I would fuck Tiny Fey over all these other white wiminz and Selma Hayekf>Sofia Vergara

DTF- December 11, 2012 at 7:23 pm

She's a hot vlogger...

Pen Fifteen- December 11, 2012 at 6:24 pm

People on this site seem to confuse "most desireable women" with "women I hope are on tomorrow's Brazzers update."

Sho Nuff- December 11, 2012 at 5:58 pm

Yes, really. She's gorgeous and elegant. To some, that is quite desirable.

rangerrexxx- December 11, 2012 at 5:45 pm

Michele Obama is DESIRABLE? Really.

godspeed- December 11, 2012 at 4:53 pm

U guys are just mad cause most of these girls have bigger vergas than yours!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alan K- December 11, 2012 at 4:15 pm

How can people name the most desirable women of a year that hasn't happened yet? Was it all voted on by wizards and soothsayers?

Mr_Misanthropy- December 11, 2012 at 8:53 pm

They were predicted in the Revelations of St. John the divine. It's just another sign of the coming apocalypse.

cman- December 11, 2012 at 4:11 pm

Yeah, any list of desirable woman that includes Michelle Obama and Adele pretty much says it all.

teep- December 11, 2012 at 4:05 pm

I agree with you Jones about Kristen Stewart. Yuck. Jennifer Lawrence was #1 on this same list. When asked why she was voted #1, the voters said "She seems down to earth and easy going." I sense this is the same thing (maybe?) with Dana's mistress. Not everyone wants a high maintenance Kartrashian. Now where's my sandwich?

Ricardo Guitardo- December 11, 2012 at 4:03 pm

If they are going to include Michelle Obama on this list then the title of the article must read "The 99 most desierable women and barnyard animals of 2012".

El Guapo- December 11, 2012 at 3:43 pm

That chick that took that uppercut from the bus driver like a champ didn't make the list? She's at least top 5 on my "Most Desirable Chicks I Want on My Team When Shit Goes Down, Playa" list..

shatterproof- December 11, 2012 at 3:22 pm

For honest... wouldn't make my top 1 million. Standards -- have them!

hotter chicks in the 'Around the Web' ads above the comments on CP, on the regular.