Editor's note: This somehow failed to publish yesterday. Not that anyone (myself included) noticed or cared- everyone's busy enjoying the company of family and friends, or trying to be civil among relatives.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

"Look, what's bothering me is not so much that you're always eating my food, but more the fact that you seem to think you can replace it all with paper shreddings without me noticing. It's like, you're taking basic theft and turning into an insult to my intelligence."

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Does this drawing have some kind of point behind it? Some kind of underlying philosophical meaning about what it means to be human and to belong to groups? I guess if there was one, it would be that people with square heads are jerks.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

The evil Dr. Vandertramp received the latest report: a hundred more zeppelins and fifty new fighter planes were ready at strategic points along the arctic perimeter. Watchtowers and flak cannons were now fully manned. Everything was going according to plan; this year, Dr. Vandertramp would finally ruin Christmas.

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Of the literally hundreds of items on Roger's to-do list, there was only one he could remember. It was the very last entry, and he was in no hurry to reach it: it read simply self-destruct. Roger wasn't sure how he felt about that one, but figured he could delay the need to decide by not accomplishing any of the other tasks.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

The party had been a smashing success, and each guest left with a gift bag of evidence to remember the good times they had had, and to be kept or buried somewhere outside of the reach of snooping federal marshals.