Bethenny Ever After

In the latest chapter of the never ending divorce saga between Bethenny Frankel and her estranged husband Jason Hoppy, the reality star told fans last week that she didn't follow her own mantra of "going with her gut" when making her decision to wed Hoppy in 2010.

At the NYU Alumni Association's Speakers on the Square event (moderated by PEOPLE) Frankel – an NYU alumni who majored in Psychology and Communications – spoke out about her belief in going with your gut in everything from her business to personal life.

Asked by an audience member what her gut told her as she was about to wed Hoppy, she said, "I think my instinct and gut going into my marriage [knew] it would turn out the way it did. I could feel it, but I intellectualized it. People are always talking about 'Do I go with my head or my heart?' Go with your gut."

Her divorce from Jason Hoppy may not be finalized yet, but Bethenny Frankel is 100 percent positive that she never wants to walk down the aisle again.

In an interview on Bravo's Watch What Happens Live, host Andy Cohen asked the Real Housewives of New York star if she still believed in marriage following the nasty, public split from her estranged husband.

"I will never get legally married again," she told Cohen. "It doesn't mean that I would not commit to someone, and I'm not jaded or bitter about love. I think there are amazing guys out there, but I will never, ever be legally married again."

While Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy aren't scheduled to return to divorce court for a few more weeks, the reality-star-turned-talk-show-host has been giving a lot of thought to how far apart she and her ex have drifted.

At the time of the split, Frankel released a statement in which she said that she and Hoppy hoped to "amicably co-parent" their daughter Bryn, who turns 3 next month.

"I can't just only be on reality TV and show everything when it's fairy princess, fairytale, and then not take my hits when I have to," she says on Wednesday's The Ellen DeGeneres Show. "Just going through something personal you have so many different emotions, and I feel like a bit of a disappointment to all of you. And, I feel like a failure."

"You are not a disappointment. You are not a failure," DeGeneres says.

"It brings me great sadness to say that Jason and I are separating," Frankel, 42, had said in a statement Dec. 23. "This was an extremely difficult decision that as a woman and a mother, I have to accept as the best choice for our family."

"There was no one turning point that caused this," a friend tells PEOPLE, adding that the stress of the cameras was not a factor for the couple, who wed in 2010 and are parents of daughter Bryn, 2½.

The couple had argued over the years about everything from the frequency of their visits to his parents' home to birthday plans, but "they tried to make it work," says the friend. "It just got too hard to be husband and wife."