Monday, April 10, 2017

Doing Good is the Ultimate Stress Reducer

You’re probably aware of the
many personal benefits of volunteering, not the least of which is that
volunteers tend to enjoy longer, healthier lives. You are no doubt also aware
of the already hefty demands on your time: your job/s, spouse/significant
other, children, aging parents, relatives, friends, your need to stay
physically fit, politically informed, keep up with social media, your boss’s
latest mania, etc.

Don’t Put Off Volunteering Until You Have “More Time.”
Volunteering may seem to be something
uniquely suited to retirees and seniors, i.e., those with lots of time on their
hands. Something you figure you’ll do “when I get to those years.” A laudable
ambition, for sure. But you’re missing out on a wonderful, easy, cost-free way
to increase your health and longevity by deferring volunteering until you’ve
run out of things to do.

The misconception is that
volunteering requires hours and hours of committed effort. It certainly can,
but it doesn’t need to. The essential benefit of volunteering comes from the support that you give to another human
being. Someone in need. It’s less a matter of the time involved than it is of
the giving of self.

Helping Others Leads to Less Stress. Recent research published in Psychosomatic Medicine (Inagaki et al., 2016), concludes that people who give social support (fancy words for helping
others) are less affected by stress. Now, in case you missed the news flash –
stress kills. Namely, stress depresses the immune system and can wreak havoc
with our cardiovascular system, both of which tend to shorten our life and/or
make us miserable. The less affected you are by stress, the more your overall
well-being increases.

If
the benefit of volunteering comes not from hours and hours of selfless
devotion, but from the “giving of self,” how do you do that in practical terms?
How do you give of yourself when you barely have time to breathe?

One simple way is to smile. Yes, smiling at people for
no good reason is a way to support them, and give of yourself. Smiling at
someone to reassure them that things are going to be all right is even better.

Give
someone a hug. It doesn’t have to be the love-fest of the century, just a
simple acknowledgement of someone’s feeling lonely, or bereft, or upset, a way
of saying, “I’m with you, it’s OK.”

Listen. Listen without texting,
tweeting or drifting. Listen with your ears, brain and heart. Listen with your
eyes. Listening to someone with genuine appreciation or empathy for whatever
they are going through or wish to communicate is one of the most powerful ways
to support them. Try it with your teenagers, with that co-worker you don’t
like, with your partner. even when you’re tired. Listen.

Making
others feel better without interfering in their lives, fixing things for them,
or enabling their drama – just offering a smile, a hug, your full-on listening
– makes them feel supported, not as adrift in whatever upset/unhappiness
plagues them. It doesn’t take any more of your time, simply your full
attention. In return, you get to feel valuable. You benefit, whether you
realize it in the moment or not, from the simple act of supporting someone.

And
if you can see your way to giving an hour of your time once a week or even once
a month to whatever cause rocks your boat – do it! An hour at the local animal
shelter helping out, an hour spent at your local library participating in a
children’s reading program, an hour distributing food at the homeless shelter –
great! You’ll feel good about yourself, which is good for your mental and
physical health, as you do good for others.

Even
adolescents benefit from volunteering. Research published
in the journal JAMA Pediatrics showed
that when Canadian tenth-graders in a recent
study began volunteering at an after-school program for children, the high
schoolers lost weight and had improved cholesterol profiles as compared to
their non-volunteering peers: “Adolescents who volunteer to help others also
benefit themselves, suggesting a novel way to improve health.”

You’re may not be that far away from
adolescence (OK, several decades, but who’s counting?). Maybe what benefits
teenagers in such a measureable manner can benefit you too. It’s worth a try.

If you need inspiration for the
long-term benefits of volunteering, take it from Mary Bochanis, 92. She’s the longest-serving Red Cross volunteer in its
history. She served for the last 73 years, starting at Walter Reed Hospital
(where, as a volunteer, she met her husband, when he was recuperating from a
WWII injury), as well as at The Children’s Inn at the NIH for the past 26 years.
In 2016, she received the Maryland Governor Larry Hogan’s Lifetime Service
Award for her good work. Vivacious, always with a smile, she says that giving
just a little bit, one gets so much back in return. Not surprising, she has no
plans to stop volunteering.

About Me

I'm a psychologist, consultant and speaker who has authored over a dozen books, all of which focus on empowering individuals to be happier, healthier and more successful at work, at home and in relationships. The power of appreciation is the theme that runs through all my books, the latest being "Happy Healthy...Dead: Happy Healthy…Dead: Why What You Think You Know About Aging Is Wrong and How To Get It Right.” If you'd like to know more, please visit www.noellenelson.com!
Thank you.