Don’t expect any Rico-isms in this post – he’s currently on the back veranda howling up at the moon while the Dog attempts to lure him inside with Banrock Station.

The truly crap thing about all this, aside from the pointless and miserable loss of beautiful creatures, is that we all felt so deeply sorry for Glen when his lovely, articulate and humorous wife, Jane, died from breast cancer.

Little did we know he would be consoling himself by jumping on a plane to Africa and butchering his way across the Serengeti.

We don’t believe in Heaven – how can we when we’d so clearly be destined for the bottom-end? – and we spit out our port whenever some fool declares that animals would be left outside the gates.

But if by some chance we are wrong, Mr McGrath, we can only your hope your wife is up there apologising for your cruelty and hypocrisy.