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...but does anyone know how hard it is for an ENFP to get over unrequited love? Is it as hard as it is for an ISFJ? Do you guys think I actually have any serious competition with her, considering that he was the one to end their relationship? :c

If he has any common sense he will choose which of you he likes more. You don't "win someone" really, in the end it's all the person's choice.

ENFP getting over love? Very difficult. VERY. It's probably just her wanting him back, but if he ended it then he may push her away once again if he doesn't want a relationship with her anymore.

Sounds like you like eachother! So he kept the other girl a secret? Sounds like he was just dating her to put the pressure on you to see if you would budge on your decision or maybe he was just trying to move on but couldn't. Either way, it's not a big deal if you truly do love him especially if he never stopped treating you the same.

Oh yes, I am quite sure that I love him. C:

Originally Posted by d@v3

You being aloof/ignoring him = you not caring about him. It's as simple as that in the eyes of an ISTJ. Although SOMETIMES we can see through your smokescreen of aloofness and see how you REALLY feel. It kind of sounds like you are sending mixed signals to him. Being bashful around him and ignoring him are two different things. If you are bashful (blushing, giggling) it means you like him, if you ignore (keep conversations short, keep your distance around him) him that means you do not care about him.

Oh no oh no, it sounds like he probably feels like I'm ignoring him for sure. D: Sometimes I actually HAVE tried to ignore him because being around him hurt so much. Aagh, I feel so guilty!

Originally Posted by d@v3

You said he makes you depressed, why?

A LOT of reasons. My fear of rejection, my fear of being inadequate... (a lot of my childhood experiences greatly encouraged my already-powerful ISFJ tendency to feel inadequate/unworthy.) I just sort of... think too much. I tend to think about all the things that could go wrong in any given situation, the more emotionally invested I am in the situation, the more this is true. When I am with him I tend to think about all of my faults and all the things I am probably doing wrong, and end up convincing myself that there is no way he would like me. I guess you could say that my mind is somewhat self-destructive in this way. And of course when he is with or has been with the ENFP, that's the worst.

Yeah, I know I'm female but my ISFJ boyfriend is truly my perfect match. I think ISTJ-ISFJ is a great combination.

<3 !

It is such a relief to know there are ISTJ-ISFJ relationships out there. All of the ISTJ profiles on the internet make it seem like they would only ever be interested in Es. :/ And they make them sound almost robot-like, which I know is not my ISTJ.

It is such a relief to know there are ISTJ-ISFJ relationships out there. All of the ISTJ profiles on the internet make it seem like they would only ever be interested in Es. :/ And they make them sound almost robot-like, which I know is not my ISTJ.

Well... I would have to disagree with those internet profiles! You sound like a very sweet, shy girl and that is what ISTJ's like! Well, at least I do!

i'm sorry...i have to disagree with this...as an enfp...i will certainly go after what i want but if it wasn't mutual...i would get over it super fast....hypothetically.

The ENFPs I know who have broken up, if they still think that there is a chance it could happen again then they will try to keep pursuing it. They hold on to their old feelings, and if they do then they won't see the bad sides of things or if they do then they will ignore it and hope it will get better. Just what I've seen. This will happen especially at the high school age, and especially in the females. The males I know who are my age are a little better about it.

The ENFPs I know who have broken up, if they still think that there is a chance it could happen again then they will try to keep pursuing it. They hold on to their old feelings, and if they do then they won't see the bad sides of things or if they do then they will ignore it and hope it will get better. Just what I've seen. This will happen especially at the high school age, and especially in the females. The males I know who are my age are a little better about it.

you're probably right blackcat...see...^^ i had already deleted it! haha

i decided maybe i shouldn't answer hypothetically.

oh...but you didn't quote the nice part..anyway tea party...i was saying i think an isfj would be great with an istj so good luck to ya..

There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.

Yeah erin I know that you're mature, but immature people of any type are bad. This ENFP in question hasn't let go of her old boyfriend yet. They broke up about 5 months ago and he's had two other girlfriends. He used to beat her and get very mad at her all the time and tell her he hated her, he was basically using her. Nothing has shown her that he isn't a good person yet, she's still attached. It's a messy situation.