Social support good for your health

Gail Carlson, MPH, Ph.D., former Health Specialist,
Continuing Medical Education, School of Medicine, University of Missouri

Building
relationships with others is important to our mental and physical
health. Research suggests that people with large support networks are
healthier. Those around you can help you deal with stress and grief
and ward off isolation and depression. Your support network influences
your physical health in a variety of ways, including when you go to
the doctor and for what. Your network also impacts your ability to make
health-related behavior changes. It is difficult to reduce fat or salt
in your diet or to become physically active on a regular basis when
family members and friends make fun of or discourage your efforts
to change. On the other hand, it becomes easier to maintain a behavior
change or carry out a treatment plan when you have the support of family
and friends.

Healthy supportive relationships contribute significantly to our
sense of well-being. Who are the important people in your life? Who
makes you feel better about yourself?

Think about your support system for a moment. Get out a piece of
paper and draw five concentric circles — a small circle in the middle
and then four more around it, making each circle a little bigger. When
you are done, your drawing will look like a target. Make the circles
big enough so that you can write in them.

Write your name in the inner-most circle, the smallest one.

In the next circle write down the names of your immediate family
members. Usually these would be people you live with. A spouse, your
children; possibly your parents or a brother or sister if they live
with you. Some people include their pets.

In the next circle write the names of other family members or
friends — the people you feel close to but don’t live with. These are people you can count on. Include people in this circle
who you feel make a real difference in your life. This could include
grown children who no longer live with you, your brothers and sisters,
grandparents, cousins and friends. Maybe you would put your minister
in this circle. Every person's network is different. You might decide
that your minister belongs in this circle while someone else might
feel they belong in the next circle.

In the fourth circle write down the names of acquaintances. These
could be neighbors, distant relatives, people you work with, a minister,
individuals from your church or a social group you belong to. These
are people who you might stop to say hello to if you saw them on
the street but you wouldn’t share any secrets with them. Your contact
with these individuals is more limited and more formal.

Now think about all the people in the community who have an influence
on your life even though you don’t know them by name — the mayor,
county commissioners, policemen, teachers, social workers, the hospital
administrator, public health nurses, the bank president, business
owners, the YMCA, etc. These are people/organizations who influence
your life because of the rules and policies that they set. Some represent
formal sources of assistance and help that goes beyond what families
or friends can provide.

As we move further and further from our inner circle, our trust level
and commitment to people diminishes. Our attitudes to a great degree
determine which people we assign to each of these circles. The tighter
we draw our circles, the more we close ourselves off from people who
could make a difference in our lives.

Your social network is a valuable resource. Look at your support
network and think of strategies for moving more people into the inner
circles of your network. You and they will benefit.