I hate having change in my pockets. It's clutter. Besides, I rarely carry any cash nowadays—the almighty debit card tackles all transactions. So whenever I see a Salvation Army Santa endlessly tingling his little bell, I keep on marching 'til I'm out of earshot. But those days are over. The Salvation Army is loading up Santas in the Dallas area with credit card machines that will beam money directly from your bank account and into their charitable coffers. The minimum donation via plastic is $5. Which means that, one, the no cash excuse will soon be gone forever, and two, even if there wasn't a five-dollar minimum, giving anything less than five bucks when you bust out the plastic would've officially made you a dick anyway, so it's an exceptionally shrewd maneuver. I think I actually feel somewhat violated by this, but how do you have hard feelings against a charity? I guess I am a dick. [Star Telegram via Crunch Gear]