Pages

December 21, 2015

When someone talks to you, they either like you or they are willing to accept you. The moment they realize they are not willing to accept you, they will stop talking to you, no matter what you do. So don't worry about whether someone likes you or not as long as they are talking to you. Focuse on trying to figure out whether you like them or not.

December 10, 2015

Because we want to make sure you have a pleasant experience dating online, we suggest you to:

Make an email address just for dating.

You can use your real first name, but go with a different last name, just to make sure no one will have enough information to start looking for you and eventually show up at your door.

Set up a Skype account just for this purpose as well!

You will want to see and talk to your match before deciding to meet them in person.

Upload flattering, but accurate pictures.

Put up recent photographs of yourself in both indoor and outdoor light, also a full body shot as well as a close up of your face.

Tell people what kind of person you are looking for in a positive way.

If you won't date a smoker, a drinker, someone with children, make that clear (but not rudely) in your profile. Keep in mind that some smokers, drinkers, single parents may still (for whatever reasons) contact you.

Check your spelling and grammar.

Most people say that poor writing is an instant turn-off.

Check a few times a week to see if anyone new has shown up that may interest you.

People create and delete profiles every day. So you never really know when the right person might show up or when will go away.

Have a phone conversation with a match before any initial meeting.

Even if you talked on Skype, you should verify their phone number as well, and share it with a relative.

Always have the first few meetings and dates in a crowded public place.

By a crowded public place I mean a restaurant. You don't want to go the cinema or a park.

Always tell someone where you are going and who you are meeting. And have someone call you during your initial meetings to see if you are fine.

Give this person as many information as possible, as well as your date's phone number. Your safety depends on them. After all you don't really know who you are actually meeting.

Do not allow anyone but the wait staff and yourself near your drink.

Personally when I go out I only order a sealed bottle of water that I use without a glass. Yes, I know that says I have no manners, but I think it is better to be safe than sorry.

Relax and let your body language create the chemistry between the two of you.

Initial love depends 55% on gestures and 35% on the tone of your voice. So the more agitated you are, the less likely you will be able to create that chemistry everyone is talking about. Yes, it is very easy to fall in love with a relaxed person, that is why before you meet them you should look at the compatibility and the real personality description we offer you about our members.

December 8, 2015

Your dating profile photo is supposed to make someone decide if they like you or not. For that reason, you need a portrait like photo where we can clearly see your face and your eyes and your head, so no masks, sunglasses or hats. Besides the portrait, you should also add a full body picture.

November 24, 2015

As a man you should know that a woman wants you to talk to her, the problem is she is too subtle and you have got to learn to pay attention. Women do not acknowledge men they do not like. Any time you get attention from a women, it is because she likes you. When a woman does not want your attention, she will find a way to avoid it.

October 18, 2015

Dating is something that most people go through at least once during a lifetime. There are many different ways to meet someone that you would like to date ranging from online dating sites to socializing at a party. Some people are great at meeting potential dates, while others prefer to be set up on blind dates. The fact of the matter is that dating has been around for centuries now, and it looks like this type of social interaction is here to stay. In most instances, the sole purpose of dating someone is to find a potential mate who you can grow old with.

If you are looking for that right person, chances are you want someone who attracts you, who has a personality to compliment your own, and who shares other qualities that will make a connection possible. If you want to know more about a person before you decide to approach them about a relationship, online dating can be your best option. Online dating can give you a fresh approach to finding love. Why leave it to chance when you can take control of your own destiny and find love for yourself?

Single and Looking is the online dating site that will help you find a date, form a lasting relationship, and discover love. We are devoted to offering member profiles, photos, personal email and more to help you get around in the online singles world and dating scene.

Single-and-Looking.com helps to match your profile with a dating partner who does not only match your search criteria, but you also match theirs and who also has similar interests.

So, if dating, long-term relationships, or just browsing online dating sites is your interest, try our online dating site that is working to make your single
dating experience a success. If you are looking to find a date (or a mate), you will find Single-and-Looking.com helpful.

When it comes to dating, there is no time like the present to start networking with people who may be a perfect match for you.

October 17, 2015

Being single in a foreign country and looking for your own nationality

You might say, being in a relationship with a foreigner is no problem because it happens
everywhere and anywhere. As long as two people are in love, that is all that matters, there is really nothing much to
argue about. Let them get on with their lives so they can produce
beautiful, exotic offspring.

At times, however, it is not as easy as that. And some people might prefer a more conservative approach. But if you happen to be a single conservative person living in a foreign country, finding a date can seem like an extremely difficult task. In this case, Single-and-Looking.com can help you find your own nationality and/or someone who speaks the same language you do.

For example, lets assume you are a single Italian man living in USA and
looking for a like-minded romantic Italian lady who happens to live near
by. All you have to do is select Italian as the language that you speak
and select your state, states near by or where you want us to look for
your lady.

October 16, 2015

A new Blackhawk Engagement Solutions’ survey of employed Americans
reveals that happy employees are more productive than unhappy employees.
The study also shows that employee rewards and recognition may not be
aligned with what actually makes employees happy and more productive. Out of a list of 12 influences, with one being the highest, respondents
ranked their jobs number eight in terms of contributions to overall
happiness. Ranking in the top spots were family, friends and health.

Make your single employees happier by referring them to single-and-looking.com

Happiness leads to greater levels of profits

Workers with strong relationships with co-workers are likewise better at staying engaged and performing under stress. A recent Gallup survey found only 13% of employees are engaged at work, meaning the vast majority of working adults doesn't enjoy their work.

Happiness is the ultimate productivity booster, because happy people:

work better with others;

fix problems instead of complaining about them;

have more energy,

are more creative, optimistic, motivated, and healthy (i.e., they take fewer sick days);

worry less about making mistakes (and then actually make fewer mistakes);

learn faster; and

make better decisions.

Married couples are happier than single people, especially those who say they married their best friend, says a new study. The National Bureau of Economic Research in Canada used data for the report from the British Household Panel Survey, the United Kingdom's Annual
Population, and the Gallup World Poll.

October 5, 2015

Deleting accounts you've created on the Internet isn't always easy, or possible. There are a number of dating sites that do not let you delete an account, period. However, deleting your account from Single and Looking is permanent, and deleted accounts cannot be reinstated. We have even created a short video to show you the steps and how easy that is.

September 14, 2015

What expectations do men think that women have from them? What expectations do men have from women?

One of the logical fallacies of men is that they believe that women are
attracted to them the same way that they are attracted to women. That
is false.

Generally speaking, women do not weigh physical
attraction nearly as high as men weigh it. Instead, women prefer
signals of strength, leadership, intelligence and wealth.

Here are a few other common fallacies that men have. They believe that women like:

1) to be put on a pedestal
-
This is not true. Women like to be treated with respect, but also will
test men for their fitness as mate. If you put a woman on a pedestal
and subjugate yourself to her whims you are showing weakness. Women
deplore weakness in men even more than they enjoy fawning attention (for
while).

2) to be indulged when they are indecisive
- "I don't
know, what do YOU want to do" should be banished from every man's
lexicon. Women want you to lead and make decisions, especially if the
options are particularly ambiguous. (this does not mean that if she
really wants sushi and you don't care that you should pick something
else just to be "decisive". You can be decisive without being a jerk.)

3) to be smarter than their man
-
women want a man who is as smart or smarter than they are. Ask any
woman PhD how interested they are in the books down at the pool hall,
even though they are buff from delivering refrigerators all day long.

4) you to always agree with them
-
If a woman is wrong, treat her like a grown up and tell her she's wrong
and explain why. If you are an atheist and she goes to church every
Sunday, don't compromise your principals. You may need a different
woman, though, for some thing as fundamental as religion.

5) you to buy her extravagant gifts
-
Some women love getting gifts - but those women prefer quality over
cost. A quality gift can be a box of Skittles in the right context. Big
gifts for big occasions are fine, but only if you feel it and you can
afford it. Giving here outlandish gifts in the hope that she will have
more sex with you is an egregious miscalculation.

6) you to never cry in front of them
- Crying because someone you love died is perfectly fine. Crying because your team lost a game is not.

7) to initiate sex most of the time
-
Generally speaking, women have "responsive desire", which means that
they need you to take the initiative most of the time. Women will
initiate sex, of course, but if she is doing it much more often, and you
find yourself turning her down more than a couple of times a year, then
you've got yourself a serious libido mismatch that needs to be
addressed. Get thee to a urologist and have your testosterone levels
checked.

8) you to put the toilet seat down
- This one is
often cited in jokes. However, she is a grown up woman who can check
the toilet seat all by herself, just like you do. She needs to grow up.

9) you do a lot of housework
-
In dual income households, it makes sense to share the housework. But
if she is a housewife (I prefer that to "stay at home mom"), then her
job is the housework. Don't be a slob, and don't be disrespectful of
her efforts. Sharing chores as a way to get more sex is wrong and
ineffective. So only do them for the right reason - if you both work.

10) you be out of work
-
An unemployed man is less attractive as an employed man - even if he is
a stay-at-home dad. If he is a stay at home dad, he should be working
on some money-making or educational endeavor with the aim to get back
in the workforce.

11) you to be abusive
- There is a lot of
literature out there that claim men should be an "alpha asshole" to
attract women. In fact, alpha assholes do attract women, even smart
attractive high quality women. But alpha assholes are still
assholes. A man can be confident and decisive without being a jerk. Think of it as a "captain/first officer" model. The captain relies on
and consults with the first officer about the course, but ultimately he
sets it.

12) you to be lazy
- Sitting around in your sweatpants playing X-Box every night does not a compelling mate make.

13) you to be out of shape
-
Women are much more forgiving of physical flaws than men are, but if
you are a fat lazy slob who is doing nothing to control the effects of
age and malnutrition on his body, you will be less attractive. Even
showing a decent effort to stay in shape will be rewarded. Attraction
is not a choice - don't give her a reason for the default "no" to kick
in.

14) you to let her defend herself from physical violence
-
Women like the comfort of having a strong man by them so if shit gets
real he can step in and take out the bad guys. This is a primal
feeling that many women will deny - but it's there. Also, she needs to
know that you can physically destroy her if she gets out of
line. This should be implied and never stated outright, and you should
NEVER show any physical violence to a woman. There are rare
circumstances when an intense stare and dominant growl are warranted,
expected, and even appreciated. Of course, that doesn't mean she
shouldn't be a bad-ass and take kickboxing or something. But she should
still feel safer with you by her side.

Now, for the expectations that men have of women.

1) to be sexually available and enthusiastic
-
Men like women for sex. Try to understand that men have 20x the
testosterone of women and we spend a good portion of our mental energy
suppressing millions of years of evolutionary urges.

2) to be kind and loving toward him
- You are the physical manifestation of love his his life. Your body, your attention and your desire are all he needs.

3) to optimize her waist/hip ratio
-
Men universally prefer a 0.70 waist/hip ratio. The closer you can get
to this through diet and exercise the more attractive you will be to all
men, not just yours.

4) to look like a 23 year old woman
- Of
course, this is impossible, and women who look good "without any
makeup" are usually wearing the right amount of makeup to make them look
as close to 23 years old as possible. But even though it is
impossible, men also will trade "pretty" for "sexy" almost any day of
the week. So, your sexy attitude and his "wife goggles" will override
the 20 lbs. of baby fat that you just can't shake.

5) to have a well developed maternal instinct
-
If you are going to be the mother of his babies, he expects you to want
to do that. Even if you decide or can't have kids, a woman can do
worse than have a protective maternal way about her.

6) to stand by him
-
"Stand by your man" is corny - but if he fucks up, he would like to
know that you are on his side, even if his side is somewhat dodgy.

7) to smile a lot
- Men like happy and confident women. They also like women with a purpose, but it is not nearly as important as

8) to have a career. or not
-
Having a career does not move the needle much either way for men when
it comes to attraction. It's kind of like having hair on men. Most
women have a slight preference, but it is easily overridden by other
considerations.

9) to sync up with their expectations of having kids
-
A guy who wants to have kids really needs a woman who feels the same
way. Likewise a guy who does not want to have kids should marry a woman
who wants 10 kids.

10) to be a great housekeeper
- Even
working women are expected to be neater than men. Running a slovenly
household is not a good harbinger of a woman's fitness as a parent. It
doesn't mean you have to be anal about it - just run a sponge over the
counter once in a while.

11) for you to be relatively the same attractiveness as him
- a wife who is unattractive is a social liability to her husband.
- a wife who is very attractive will be the target of thousands of potential suitors.

September 7, 2015

"I don't think love is about fireworks, birds singing and the
perfect person. Love is all about percentages. Let's say that 18% of the
time you drive me crazy, like insane crazy. But 82% of the time I had
more fun with you than anyone ever." - from "Hello ladies" movie
Success in a relationship is all about percentages, but not
necessarily in the way described. There are different components we take
into consideration when creating someone's profile and their needs,
like the social, emotional, physical, intellectual, sexual component.
When two singles share 80% similar needs on all components, we encourage
them to start a relationship. When two singles share 100% similar needs
on social, emotional, physical and intellectual component, but only 10%
on the sexual component, we cannot encourage that relationship because
they are too different. At first they might like the idea of trying
something new, but in time they will not feel comfortable doing only
things they cannot do. The false believe that only by having sex a
couple can tell how compatible they are, is the same one making men
think there is something wrong with them, while the truth is they are
just not compatible; and sexual compatibility can be measured without
interaction.

Why should I believe there is such a thing as a perfect match or a perfect compatibility?

We are not pretending to offer you a perfect compatibility, but we
will show you from our members who you are most compatible with. So even
if you decide not to become a full member in order to see your
compatibility, by completing your profile you allow other members to see
how compatible they are with you.

August 31, 2015

Online Dating Tips

Online dating is now the second-most common way couples meet, with 40
to 50 percent of singles trying out services, from sites to apps. So if
you're single and wish to avoid spending all your time clicking
aimlessly or going on dates you feel like running (screaming) from, you
need to make a few changes.

look for compatible match dates -- Compatibility is an
important factor that will save you time. Some people are attractive but
not photogenic and photos will just not do them justice. Most of us are
not professional writers, so personals will only give you a glimpse of
who your date really is.

upload a nice photo of yourself -- Go out in the
natural light of the day and take a nice photo of yourself, and by
yourself we mean you alone. You don't want to show how attractive your
friends are, do you? No matter how bad you think you look, there are
plenty of people who like you just the way you are. Those are the one
you should consider dating.

keep your personal ad short and to the point -- By
short we don't mean "you'll find out more about me at our first date";
we meant to say go ahead and tell us something but just keep it under
100 words. Tell the right person why you are right for them.

Why is dating in the 21st century more nerve-wracking than ever?

Part of it is demographics. About half of Americans are single, so
there should be lots of choices out there, right? Not necessarily.
Single men outnumber single women in the western half of the U.S., and
vice versa in the eastern half, where there are more single women. So
anyone living in Los Angeles (where there are about 90,000 more single
men than women) who is looking for a man has an advantage over someone
living in New York (which has 200,000 more single women than men)
Dating anxiety could also have something to do with changing
social norms -- you may not be sure what your role is in the dating
sphere. People are living longer, gender roles are becoming more
flexible, and adults are putting equal priority on their careers,
friendships and social causes. Still, the pressure is on to date as much
as possible, find a soul mate and get married. However, despite all
this pressure and the unfavorable odds, dating can be a lot of fun with a
compatible partner.7 reasons to date online
When trying to determine whether or not online dating is the right
path for you there are some main points to consider. These top ten
reasons may help provide you with some of the positive aspects of online
dating.
3 steps to perfect personals
Many people are finding out each day that getting on the best
online dating sites isn’t the only key to finding the right people to
date. Those who want to get the right message across and to meet new
people need to make sure that they begin with the very best personals in
order to get the right attention.
what do men look for in a woman?
andwhat do women look for in a man?
In general, we tend to couple with people who have a similar level
of attractiveness. We also find that men tend to fall for pretty faces,
while women are highly attracted to men with fat wallets. From an
evolutionary standpoint, this makes sense because men are looking to
improve their gene pool while women are looking for men who will help to
support their children.
things women do that drive men crazy
andthings you should never say to a woman
There are certain questions, phrases and demands you should never utter to a man or a woman.
Love is a conscious choice!
True, love is the ability to choose one person above all, and the ability to celebrate that choice for as long as you live.
Dating Safety tips - practical tips for dating
Better safe than sorry!

August 24, 2015

Practical Tips for Dating Online and Off

There is no substitute for acting with caution when communicating with
any stranger who wants to meet you. You are in control of your online
dating experience at all times -- remain anonymous until you feel ready.
Remember to always trust your instincts. If you feel unsafe or
threatened, cease communication and report any misbehavior immediately.

Guard your identity. Don't share your full name, personal phone
numbers, home address, place of work or any other identifying
information while messaging until you have established a reasonable
level of trust with the other party.

Get to know the other person online before meeting them offline.

Dating Safety Tips for Meeting Online

NEVER share your personal or financial information with people you
don't know. Make sure to follow these guidelines at all times when
meeting new people online:

Don't wire money to strangers or to someone who claims to be in an emergency (and wants to keep the request a secret).

There are certain red flags to watch for that may indicate you're dealing with a scammer. Be aware of anyone who...

Vanishes mysteriously from the site, then reappears under a different name

Claims to be recently widowed

Asks for your address under the guise of sending flowers or gifts

Makes an unusually large amount of grammar and/or spelling errors

Asks you for money

At Single-and-Looking.com we care very much about our community and
invest in fraud detection systems to protect you. However, even with
these measures, we also need your help!

Dating Safety Tips for Meeting Offline

As of 2011, nearly 750,000 registered sex offenders were listed in the
U.S. First meetings are exciting, however, always take precautions and
use the following guidelines.

Always meet and stay in a public place. It is best not to go back
to your date's home or bring them back to yours on the first date. If
your date pressures you and you feel uncomfortable, end the date and
leave at once.

Tell a friend. Inform a friend or family member of your
plans, when and where you're going. Make sure you have your mobile phone
with you.

Stay sober. Do not do anything that would impair your judgment and cause you to make a decision you could regret.

August 17, 2015

Love is a conscious choice!

Our culture perpetuates unrealistic romantic expectations – and women,
in particular, are predisposed to these expectations because from the
time we're old enough to think, we dream that one day a Prince Charming
will come along, fall in love with us, and we'll live happily ever
after.
What's wrong with that picture?
Well, first of all, when we look to someone other than
ourselves to be the source of our happiness or completion, that's a
recipe for dysfunctional co-dependence, not true love. It trains us to
hold off being happy until that perfect someone, soul mate or Mr. Right
comes along.
A better strategy would be for you to be happy first --
whether you're in a relationship or not. And above all, love yourself
first (i.e., hold yourself in high esteem) -- and you'll find no trouble
finding men who will want to love you. After all, how can you expect
someone to love you if you don't first love yourself?
Expecting love to be a happily-ever-after state of being,
nothing could be further from the truth. Most of the time, the feeling
of being "in love" dissipates from your relationship. When that happens,
you become dissatisfied with your relationship, and you experience
unnecessary pain and heartbreak as a result.
Perhaps one of the most important lessons you can ever learn
about being, and staying, in love for life -- and for keeps -- is this:
Never confuse the feeling of being "in love" with love. True love is a
choice.
"Love is not just a feeling. It's a choice, a commitment, a
way of behaving toward another. Love is not simply an event that happens
to you. Rather, love is something you choose to do. The state of being
in love is simply a prelude to love. But most people make the mistake of
thinking they're one and the same thing. We are all given circumstances
by which we can exercise the choice to love. That's the thunderbolt
that God supplies. It's that instant attraction to another person, those
warm, fuzzy feelings, that fever akin to drunkenness or madness that
causes you to know that you're in love. But it's what you choose to do
after that thunderbolt has passed that matters. You choose whether
you're going to continue loving the other person after the drunkenness
has dissipated, after the frills of romance have fallen away. You choose
whether you're going to continue to seek the best interests of the
other person, and care about him or her through any and all
circumstances -- and for how long. Love is a conscious choice."
A successful relationship between a man and a woman is not
born, but made. If you allow romantic love, or feelings, to become the
basis for marriage and happiness, the foundation is likely to be
unstable because you or your mate are likely to seek new emotional highs
as time goes by. Feelings and emotions are fickle, and the
circumstances that give rise to them, even more so.
After all, even if you're in the best relationship, there
will always be days when you feel you love your mate -- other days you
may not. Some days you could feel loved, and other days you don't. Even
if you met someone who you imagine is your ideal mate, would they still
love you five, ten, or twenty years down the road -- or would you still
love them?
Love is an ongoing choice you make every day of your life.
You wake up every morning and you say to yourself, "I choose to love
this person today and every day of my life" -- their imperfections
notwithstanding. And you rejoice in the knowledge that "I get to love
this person" and expect to be loved the same way in return.
Love is a privilege, not an obligation.

August 10, 2015

things you should never say to a woman

Sports have unwritten rules. If an unwritten rule is broken, the offending player will face the consequences.
Relationships have unwritten rules. Technically, all of the rules
in dating are unwritten, but there are certain rules in relationships
that are so obvious they really shouldn't have to be explained.
Sadly, we're going to have to explain them, because some guys are just plain clueless.

"Are You Putting On Weight?"

Don't Say: “Are you putting on weight?”
This one barely needs explanation. If she's put on weight, chances
are she's already well aware of that herself. The last thing she needs
is for you to point it out.
Instead Say: “Let's do something active today. I'm feeling out of shape.”
If you do believe she's putting on weight, then your ultimate goal
is for her to eat better and exercise. Instead of letting her know that
you've noticed she's gone up a size or two (and trust us, she knows
already), shift the focus to committing to being healthier together.
You're not perfect and could probably stand to lose a couple pounds,
too. The focus will then be on sharing healthy activities together,
rather than on her weight gain.

"You Look Awful In That Outfit!"

Don't Say: “You look awful in that outfit.”Instead Say: “I just don't like that outfit.”
If you must voice your displeasure in her appearance, it's best to
blame the outfit and not the person underneath. If you don't like the
way she looks in a dress, shirt or sweatshirt that graduated college
with her, make it about the faults of the material. If you want to
soften the blow, package the critique with a compliment so it doesn't
sound like she's the unattractive piece of the puzzle. "I don't think
that color works with your skin tone" or "That dress is making you look
heavy in places that you're not" are at least softer ways of putting
down her clothing choices.

"Was That Good For You?"

Don't Say: “Was that good for you?”
Almost as bad a question as "How many people have you been with sexually" is the query "How was that?" right after sex.
Instead Say: “That was amazing.”
If you want to know how you did, without asking bluntly, tell her how good she was in bed. She'll have to respond in some way.

"How Many Men Have You Been With?"

Don't Say: “How many men have you been with?”
Just as she should never ask how many women you've been with, you
should never ask her how many men she's slept with. The reason you
should never ask this question is because you don't want to know. It
doesn't matter if the number is high or low -- there is nothing to be
gained from the knowledge of how many other men she's been with
sexually. The only thing it will do is change the way you feel about
her. If it's too high, you'll think she just gives it up to any guy, and
if it's too low you'll wonder if there is something wrong with her.
Instead Say: “How many long-term relationships have you been in?”
If you must know, or find yourself in a situation where you have
to ask, it's better to steer the question away from sex and more towards
relationships, stay away from the word sex, and focus on dating
history.

August 3, 2015

things women do that drive men crazy, in a bad way

Men love women. We do. We love making them laugh. We smile when
they're happy and do our best to comfort them when they're not. Which
probably goes a long way toward understanding how we put up with the
crazy things they do.

She Poses Entrapping Questions

"Do I look fat in this?" "Is my friend Bella pretty?" We're all
familiar with the questions, and the innocent way girls pose them,
putting you between a rock and a hard place.

She Holds Grudges

Once you've made the mistake of giving a wrong answer to a loaded
question, even if it was years ago, even if it was before you were
dating, even if you've apologized or changed your mind, you better
believe you haven't heard about it for the last time.

She Says "Fine"

Gentlemen, things are never "fine" when they say things are "fine."
There is no single word that should cause you more fear and agitation,
because when she says, "fine," what she really means is that things have
reached world-ending, cataclysmic levels of bad and the fact that you
don't know it only makes things worse.

She Expects You To Read Her Mind

Ladies want a man who is attentive and sensitive to their needs.
Unfortunately, they often confuse being nice with being Nostradamus. No,
girls, sadly we cannot tell when you're hungry or thirsty, and we most
definitely can't guess where you'd like to eat or what movie you'd like
to see -- at least without a little input.

July 27, 2015

what do women look for in a man?

There is an age old question that haunts most of us men looking to
attract women. Even more important than what we should wear, or how we
should behave in a flirting situation, is this simple age old query.

Confidence

Most men either have no confidence, or carry around a false sense of
confidence in an attempt to impress women. Women, just like men, want to
see "real confidence" in a man's behavior and attitude, and are
sensitive to true confidence versus false bravado. Even if you can fake
your confidence at first, any woman you attract and begin spending time
with will learn your "true colors" with time – usually it doesn't take
very long. Having confidence is about more than thinking you're
attractive (which actually makes you look conceited), or believing that
you can achieve certain goals. A confident man will share his opinions
without being argumentative, doesn't mind an intellectual debate and is
open to new ideas. Carry this confidence into the bedroom – don't ask if
she's having a good time or if you're a good enough lover, simply
assume you are and let her make the final decision. Most women react to
confidence the way most men react to large breasts – it could be the
most attractive thing about men to many women. In fact, true confidence
will seep into the other areas of your life, and pretty much ensure that
the other three categories listed here will be met.

Affection

Showing affection is not a matter of physical contact or emotional
connection alone, but a complex mix of the two. Just like men, women
want to know that they are appreciated, and this comes through affection
and closeness as much as it does through any other aspect of a
relationship. Take the time to learn a woman's likes and dislikes, and
cater your actions to these things. This doesn't mean compromising your
own taste -- okay, so it does sometimes, but not all the time. An
example of a small gesture that shows affection would be something like
what happened on my first date with my current girlfriend. We were on a
walk around the town square, and could only scrape together enough money
for one glass of wine to share between the two of us. She mentioned a
preference for Chardonnay, a wine that I usually detest. Though I wanted
to order the heftiest and most expensive pinot noir on the menu, I
compromised and shared her Chardonnay with her. I smiled through the
pain and could tell she really appreciated it. Affection is also shown
in bigger gestures, including public affection like holding her hand to
show you're proud of her. Any pains you take to show true affection will
be well rewarded, and your woman will feel special and appreciated.

Security

We live in an age where women can be truly independent – it is no
longer true that a man must provide everything for his woman. Providing
"security" means more than bringing home the bacon, or standing up for
her honor. A woman wants to know that her partner is going to work at
least as hard as she is to get the good things in life. If you wait
tables two days a week and spend the rest of your time playing video
games, you don't make a very likely partner long term. Paying your bills
and being financially honest with a woman are two other great tactics
to proving you are stable and can help provide security to your
relationship. Especially now, with the economy in a nosedive and not
likely to get much better for a few years, it is important for your
potential dating partner to know you're going to pull your weight. Even
though most women don't need to simply take money from their men
anymore, its vital for a man to prove that he can provide when called
upon. Buy dinner as often as you can, give her little gifts, and put
your nose to the grind at work. Your potential partners will appreciate
the show of security, and your confidence will get a big boost.

Understanding

Women are often stereotyped as "emotional" creatures – the truth is
that all people are emotional, male and female. If you weren't an
emotional guy, you wouldn't be reading this article right now – you
wouldn't be at all concerned with a woman's feelings. Being
"understanding" means providing a shoulder to cry on, honest advice and
support during tough times, and sometimes just the ability to have a
quiet night in when your partner is feeling down or sick or just plain
tired. It is easy for us as men to overlook the little things that add
up to being labeled "understanding" – if your girlfriend is feeling
moody, consider curling up under a blanket and watching her favorite
trashy TV show. If she is fighting with her friend, be a sounding board
for her concerns without adding too much of our own opinion, unless she
asks for it. When the two of you have a fight, and you most certainly
will at some point, listen to her complaints and concerns, and respond
honestly. Understanding is a vital part of a successful romantic
relationship, and one that we men struggle with the most.

July 20, 2015

what do men look for in a woman?

It's a question that has baffled women for ages. What do men consider
beautiful in women? Most of us believe men only see looks as beautiful
simply because the media believes it is true. They show us busty females
with perfect bodies plastered across our television screens,
billboards, and posters, or skinny little models posing in barely there
undergarments and designer clothing and we automatically think; "The
woman of every man's dreams". But ask any guy and you may very well be
surprised to learn those perfect bodies and skinny models are far from
his dream girl. After all men and women do not have different brains,
claims neuroscientist.

Appreciation

One of the major complaints men have in a long-term relationship is
that they often feel criticized, as if nothing they do can please their
partner. In other words, they feel unappreciated, which (unsurprisingly)
has consequences for their relationship and the couple's sex life.

Good Sex

Let's not pretend that its just men who are looking for a capable and
attentive sexual partner. We would be doing women an injustice if we
didn't give them credit for their sensual side. Men want a partner who
will be willing to share her affection physically without intimidating
him. Some women simply look too intense or “hot” for men to approach.
Sociologists tell us this could be because men are concerned about their
ability to “please” these women in bed. To that end, there is something
to be said for “dressing down” and being yourself. Some ways to show a
man you're interested in providing the physical attention he wants is
through subtle gestures and touching. Graze his arm with your hand, let
your hips touch casually, or just outright put your hand on his face –
playfully. The point of subtle touch is to make him think it was casual,
so don't be too serious about it. By allowing for casual touch, you'll
be planting a seed in his mind. Besides, you can find out if you even
like touching him long before committing to a date. Don't be intimidated
by men's desire for good sex – after all, isn't it one of your desires,
too?

Healthy Appearance

Recently, an online survey discovered that men preferred women with an
average size body and curves to those whose bodies bared more bone than
fat; like the models we see on the runways.
However, even while an average size body did turn their
heads, it was actually a woman's personality that men considered
beautiful the most. They also think that a woman with self-confidence is
beautiful. Kind, caring and sincere were three other attributes that
were also considered beautiful in a woman as well as a woman who is
willing to listen to him and engage in conversation with him.
And what did they find beautiful as far as looks? Men also
confessed that women with natural average-sized breasts were more
beautiful than women with breast implants. And when it comes to women's
fashion they think we look beautiful in casual clothing verses neat. And
what underwear did they find beautiful on a woman? Surprisingly,
average and feminine beat out the skimpy erotic panties found on models
in adult magazines. Even more surprising, the surveys found that men
thought women with a barely there, natural makeup looked more beautiful
than women who wear a lot of makeup.
So what gives? Apparently guys are finding out that there's
more than meets the eye when it comes to a woman being beautiful. Men
would rather get to know a woman and discover that she is beautiful
naturally instead of just judging her from the way she looks and finding
out that she's really an ugly person on the inside. They're discovering
what we've known all along, that true beauty lies within.
Whether or not a man is attracted to you is out of your
hands. The best you can do is prepare yourself – and by the way, keeping
your body healthy is a good idea in general. A healthy body is a happy
body, and good general health leads to good mental health. You have no
say in whether or not a man is attracted to you, but you do have control
over your health.

Trust

The word “trust” here refers not just to a man's ability to trust that
you won't cheat on him, but his ability to come to you for his
emotional needs. All people require trust before they're willing to
share with someone on a deep level – the kind of level that is healthy
for a relationship. If a man thinks you'll listen to his problems and
immediately rush off to the internet to Twitter all your friends about
it, he won't have that sense of trust necessary to really develop a
relationship. In fact, a lack of trust can lead to some really unhealthy
partnering. A many may be willing, for instance, to have sex with you
or flirt with you, but a perceived lack of trust will keep him from
really connecting with his partner. You will become, pardon the
expression, a “booty call” – not because he's a jerk, but because he
doesn't trust you enough to move the relationship into the next phase.
Here is another way in which you and your potential man are similar; you
both need trust to make a relationship work. How do you show that you
are trustworthy? Avoid gossiping to him about your friends. It may seem
fun, and yes its necessary to blow off steam, but it will teach him
another important lesson – that you are untrustworthy.

Sense of Humor

Men and women both need humor in their lives to stay happy. Humor is
also a great icebreaker in many different difficult situations. How many
times has a simple joke turned an awkward first date into a relaxed
good time, or how often have you used humor to “disarm” someone you've
been attracted to? There will most certainly come times in your
relationship that a good joke will keep a minor disagreement from
becoming a full fledged argument. Humor works because it breaks down our
sense of ourselves, relaxes us physically (laughter being the best
medicine), and shows people around us that we have a playful and
friendly side. Men want a woman with a sense of humor for the same
reason women want the same thing in a man – humor keeps our mood bright,
and can even ignite passion. It turns out, laughter is also one of the
best aphrodisiacs, and men will find your sense of humor, no matter how
goofy or corny, a serious turn on.

July 13, 2015

3 steps to perfect personals

The competition for attention on online dating services is intense. So
intense, in fact, that some people resort to lying or posting outdated
photos to try and attract that next date. It's vital that you are honest in your profile and through your photos
so that you don't meet (or interact) with others under false pretenses.
So then what are some important things you can do to build a better
profile? Here are three specific profile tips you can use to improve
your profile right now.

Keep it simple

Keep your statements simple, light and inviting. Taking the
opportunity in your profile to rant about life isn't the best way to
attract others and you need the highlights to pop out a grab attention.
Make sure that you list your best features first as you might lose
someone further down the page or in a more detailed section.
Consider your profile from a quick glance point of view and create
one that will hand over the best highlights quickly enough that a
person who is browsing might be inclined to read more about you. Take
any opportunities you have for using quick descriptions or tags that
other might be more inclined to read rather than large body of text.
This includes filling out any information that can be used in a database
to help match you with others.

Avoid Negativity

Have you ever gone out on a first date where the person you were with
complained about his/her work, ex, etc? Such negative talk is a major
turnoff. Likewise, negativity is a major turnoff in your profile. Being
positive is like a magnet. Being negative is like wearing a skunk aroma.
Psychologically everyone wants to be a winner. Therefore in your
profile, avoid anything negative like the plague. Be positive.
If you have anything negative in your profile ("I hate country
music," "the last guy I dated was a liar and cheater," "I'm sick of
being alone," "I'm sick of the bar scene," etc.) then go edit it out
immediately and replace it with something positive ("I love independent
music and artists, like..."). Always be positive; not just in your
profile, but also in life.

Filter Out Unwanteds

Allow those getting a peek into your head to know what it is that
you're looking for in another person. Don't be afraid to list qualities
that you believe are important in your mate as this will help narrow the
selection to the most likely candidates available. If you're worried
about being too specific and would like to have the option of choosing
from more people, select the top five most important traits and leave
the others to be revealed during more intimate circumstances.
Your profile isn't about getting responses. It is about getting
responses from the type of person you are attracted to. Therefore, use
descriptions to help narrow your focus to what you want so that you get
responses from who you're looking for.
Instead of "I'm looking for someone fun and humorous," say, "I'm
looking for a lighthearted man between the ages of 24 and 29 who enjoys
the humorous side of life. If you are clean-shaven and can hold a
conversation during a 150 mile car journey, then we may be a match.
Email me." In the above example, you created three filters - an age
filter (24 and 29), and appearance filter (clean-shaven) and a
communication filter (good-communicator). And you did it without
offending. But you also created a response filter ("...we may be a
match. Email me.") You've helped tell the person what the next step is
if they meet your criteria. You've created a call to action, which will
help direct interested parties to email you versus waiting.

Bonus Tip

Once you have finished crafting your masterpiece remember that it is
important to update it with any new information so that others can see
you're actively looking within the community. Including a picture from
your life can be a great way to freshen up your profile without too much
effort while allowing others some insight into your world.
A great way to make your profile better is to analyze profiles you
really like. What is it that you like about them? What makes the
profiles different?
Now what will you do to make your profile different?

July 6, 2015

7 reasons to date online

When trying to determine whether or not online dating is the right
path for you there are some main points to consider. These top seven
reasons may help provide you with some of the positive aspects of online
dating.

Extensive community of people to choose from

There is no doubt that with literally millions of members within the
various online dating communities that by joining up you are expanding
your selection of potential romances. Consider the idea that your
perfect someone is just an hour away, but far enough that you might
never run into them, let alone meet, connect and fall in love, if not
for a way of getting together. The advanced network of internet dating
allows you access unlike any other method with a staggering number of
people to choose from.

Everyone you meet is on the same or at least a similar track

Rather than going out and hoping that a person you find attractive
might be interested in dating and might just agree to going out with
you, the online dating community ensures that every person you meet is
also looking for romance in one form or another. This limits the number
of people to those who share your desire to meet others, a limitation
that you can't depend on through traditional methods.

Ease of Finding Suitable Partners!

Narrowing down your selections right away to increase your match
potential will not only help you in how to find a date, but to ensure
that your list of potentials is tailored to your interests, desires and
goals. Single-and-Looking allows you to do more than just browse through
nice profiles; we give you an opportunity to ask for exactly what you
would hope to find in your match. Using this information, members are
selected and listed for you.

Immediately connecting with others who share your interests

Unlike traditional methods of dating where you hope that a person you
meet might share some of your likes and dislikes, this method allows you
to immediately be connected with those who are like minded. Many online
members find that even if romance isn't in the cards, they often find
wonderful friends who they can share their passions with throughout the
community.

Building stronger connections for meaningful relationships

Through the standard methods of dating people often connected through
physical chemistry first and allowed the rest to slowly come out over
time. Unfortunately while this can be exciting for a time, those truly
looking for love often find that this route is time consuming and too
often disappointing. Enjoying a person's physical appearance simply
isn't enough to keep most people happy. The connections made through
online dating have been proven to be more likely to help couples build
lasting relationships than any other method available to date. While
physical chemistry is certainly important, more and more people are
finding it a secondary requirement to those that seem to make for a
deeper, lasting connection.

From the comfort of your own home

Heading out to hit the dating scene can be greatly fun, but over time
many people find that the novelty wears off long before they have found
that special someone. Internet dating allows you to do everything, from
creating your own hot profile and revealing your deepest desires to live
chat (including web cam) with a person you find interesting or even
taking a little time to flirt online and strengthen your chemistry with
someone special, all from your very own home. This is an undeniable perk
of the online method, allowing you to be relaxed and feel secure in
your own environment and may also prove to be practical and economical
as well.

On your own time, at your own pace

The initial stages of setting up your profile, looking through the
profiles of others and exchanging emails are obviously entirely at your
leisure. Even better, because of the convenient location (wherever you
can access the internet) you can also arrange for instant messaging,
live chat room connections or even voice and web cam interaction at
times which fit your schedule. Because the entire online dating world is
set up differently from the traditional you can also choose to take
each connection at your own pace. This perk allows romance seekers to
operate around busy working or simply active lives thus increasing their
chances of finding the right person at the right time.

Try out the online dating scene and see where it takes you!

The success is in the numbers: Couples who find their match online
enjoy happier, long lasting relationships - More and more statistics
come out each year showing that couples who find one another online seem
to build relationships that last. Is this because they were looking for
love in the first place? Is it due to the fact that they were brought
together using advanced techniques that match the most compatible
people? Perhaps these connections are strengthened by the idea that a
mental connection can wildly increase physical attraction? Whatever the
reasons for these amazing success stories, it is important to keep them
in mind if you're looking to build this type of relationship. The deep
connections, friendships and romances that are to be found online
provide the kind of meaning so many singles are looking for in a
relationship. Those looking for that special someone would do well to
consider this method, which becomes more and more popular each day, when
trying to find ways to meet their true match.

June 15, 2015

Think all the good ones are taken?
Think again.

New data from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS), show that, for the first time ever, there are more single adults in the U.S. than married ones. As of August 2014, 124.6 million Americans were single, with 50.2 percent of the adult population (16 and over) unattached. According to the US Census, 53% of singles are women, 47% are men. However in China, there are currently 118 men for every 100 women — and around 200 million Chinese are currently single.

According to U.S. Census Bureau, Current Population Survey 2011, since the 1960s, men and women have been increasingly marrying later.
The median age at first marriage has risen to nearly 29 years for men
and to more than 26 years for women.

June 8, 2015

We all have good parts, bad parts and priorities. Our compatibility matching system determines compatibility based on your priorities. Ideally partners should be between 20 - 40% different in order to keep the relationship interesting, but similar enough to have the same perspective on life. The important thing is to know what you should have in common and what not. If you were born to be an active or a social person and your partner is not, chances are in long term you will not be happy. While just the simple fact that you like Rock and your partner likes Jazz, will not stop you from having a wonderful life together.

Most people love doing certain things. When they exaggerate with what they like, they get out of balance and have to stop doing what they love most. Therefore they should also avoid temptation, including a partner who tempts them. For example, Mr. A who loves fat products and ate them his entire life, finds out he should avoid them. But his wife who loves only salad and absolutely hates fat finds out she has to include some fat in her diet on a regular basis. What will happen is that Mr. A will become frustrated, will avoid eating with his wife and their relationship will fall apart.

We are not saying that if you do not like or do the same things you are not compatible, or that you have to do the same things in order to be compatible. What we are saying is that

Breakups occur from little but extremely important differences. Not knowing what really matters can lead to failure.