When you make a resolution, you are making a commitment to be resolute about something and the most important ingredient that will see you through is â€œdeterminationâ€.

Â

How To Make Realistic New Year Resolutions And Stick To Them

Realistic vs. Fantastical

The first and most important rule is to NEVER set â€œshouldâ€ goals. Remember there are no shoulds. Â In this modern day, we are free to do as we choose and if you really want to set yourself goals that you will really reach rather than build more evidence of failure in your life, make sure that it is something you really want and not something you feel you â€œshouldâ€ do or have. These shoulds often come from our peers, from the media, our childhood beliefs or our societal norms.

Check what is really true for you and what would help you feel fulfilled. The second rule is to look back at your past achievements and also look for evidence of other people who have achieved what you are setting out to do. Remember that if a thing is humanly possible, then you too can have it. Having said that, if you have solid evidence that your goal is not realistic, then set a milestone for this year instead of the entire goal. For example, if you want to earn a certain amount of money or lose a certain amount of weight or gain a number of credits and you canâ€™t really see it being possible, then set the goal to at least get a part of the way there by the end of the year.

How To Make Realistic New Year Resolutions And Stick To Them

Set Daily Habits

Many New Yearsâ€™ resolutions are dumped by February. This is often the case because we canâ€™t see results and we end up feeling like â€œitâ€ isnâ€™t working and so â€œwhy bother?â€ This is why it is essential to create a plan and daily strategy, evaluate the risks and possible breakdowns in your head and then set a clear and specific daily actions plan. I use a Daily Habit Forming Table which you can read about in my book and download from my website.

This gives you not only a sense of achievement it also gives you a visual representation of how well you are doing. Think of a hamster running in his cage on a wheel, he runs and runs and when he comes out, he is back where he started...this can be disheartening. The table will let you SEE how far you have come, which will only motivate you even further.

Â

How To Make Realistic New Year Resolutions And Stick To Them

Positive and Specific vs. Negative and Vague

There are two types of motivationâ€”towards motivation and away from motivation. Resolutions are often born from an â€œaway from motivationâ€ which is never as powerful as having a â€œtoward motivationâ€ as well. The most common resolutions, which usually fail are, â€œquit smokingâ€ â€œstop over eating or drinking too much and â€œlose weightâ€. They are all away from the resolution is to â€œnot do somethingâ€ rather than to form a habit of â€œdoingâ€ something.

Most people who have been successful in these goals are the ones who set them in positive language, made them specific and made them about where they wanted to go and what they wanted to do, specifically instead of what they wanted to stop doing vaguely. Setting a goal to exercise several times a week, live healthy and smoke-free days, eat healthy meals every day or drink 3 litres of water, these are the ones who actually stay committed and follow through. Saying that you want to be â€œbetterâ€ or want â€œmoreâ€ of something is very vague and there is no way of measuring it, so there is no commitment to any action.

How To Make Realistic New Year Resolutions And Stick To Them

Declarations and Accountability vs. Silent independence

Once you have set a few SMART goals or resolutions, the very next step is to declare it to several people or even on your social media and then to plan your daily action steps and write them in your habit-forming table. There is immense power in declarations as you are breathing life into your resolve. You will be engaging other people into your personal purpose and many will help to support you. You will feel answerable and more committed to stick to it as you know they are â€œwatchingâ€. This helps to create the sense of â€œaccountabilityâ€ that hiring a life coach would give you.

Â

How To Make Realistic New Year Resolutions And Stick To Them

Body and Language vs. â€œin your headâ€

Lastly, there is a lot to be said for affirmation and body positions. The position to help you stay committed to achieving your goals is one of resolute or the warrior (Newfield Network â€“ Ontological Coaching).

This is a position where you place one foot in front of the other, firm and yet leaning forward and ready to charge. Your vision is focussed and you almost have blinkers on so you can only see and hear your target. Standing in this position and saying to yourself, â€œI can and I willâ€ is a fabulous daily practice to keep you resolved every day. And as I always say, our lives are the sum total of what we do every day; our habits.

Thatâ€™s all there is to setting realistic resolutions, so set your (SMART) goals, break them down to practical and realistic daily steps and keep at it every single day of 2013. All the best.