bad joke (possible trigger) UD 4 5 11 17 19 22 24 26 27 bad update 57

Hello DWILers, Long time lurker, first time poster. This is a new name, my usual account has my name in it, and i wanted to go anonymous for my own privacy. Trigger for mentions of cancer and death

BG; My MIL is a minor boundary stomper, GMOTY faker, and general pain in the patootie. She got put on a TO for almost two years for telling my DH that she'll "see him dead" and then hanging up on him when he joined the military.

FF; we just recently had our Squish. He is the last for us. a complicated high risk pregnancy and my body just cannot handle another pregnancy again. ever. we have come to grips with this.

One of the complications was my thyroid. it stopped working years ago and i managed it with meds and bloodwork. at my endocrinologist appt on friday, she told me that i have thyroid cancer. we havent talked about the next step yet, because she wanted to do some more testing before we make that decision.

i am in shock. Fri & Sat, DH turned off phones and dealt with the news. we talked until we had accepted the cancer and how we were going to handle this whole kerfuffle. On Sunday, we told the FOO and FIL on skype. they took it as well as it can be. They promised to love and support me all ways. MIL was a different story. We told her, and she was silent. Then she looked at me and said, "Well, when you die, i'll take the kids. Then since DH wont have you or the kids to hold him back, he can marry somebody else and start over..but do it right this time" i was stunned. but before i could find my brains and lose it on her, DH stepped in. He got right in the camera and said," You have one chance to explain to me in what fucking way was that comment acceptable?" she spluttered and said it was just a joke. DH said it was the nastiest thing she has ever said, and it was the last time she' ll ever speak to us again. then he hung up.

He emailed FIL, (they divorced long ago) SILs, and GGMIL this; "MIL has crossed the line with DW and I. As far as we are concerned, she is dead. Do not talk to us about her, and do not talk to her about us. If you pass information either way, we will limit contact for 6 months. if you do it twice, you will join her. period. happy holidays! love, Mr.NoSteakSauce."

That was yesterday. she has called, texted, emailed, facebooked and tried everything but smoke signals. i am just numb. who says that to someone who just found out they have cancer.

The pictures we have are mostly group pictures from our vacations. A few from her visiting us early on... Maybe 12 or 13 in the whole house. I like photos, and I hang them up all over.

Honestly before this she was annoying but tolerable. She was on LC for years. A call once every 6 months, a Skype on Xmas, a visit once every 5 years. Any stunt she pulled just got her a TO and continued LC. I'm pretty relaxed about life...and since we live on opposite sides of the country, she really didn't bother me. When it got down to bare bones, DH has always sided with me. Every time, without pause. So her bullshit didn't bother me. I am winning.

I'm so glad you're winning. My DH will still defend his parents over me after 27 years and has no clue how it has changed the way I feel about him. He can't make the connection and I'm tired of trying to make him understand.

So disheartening. But I'm happy to know there is a guy out there who gets it.