Answers To Your Questions

General (6)

Q. My son suffered from an illness at the beginning of his life; so, I made an implicit vow before Allah that, if my son was healed, I would give what I possess of gold to the needy. Indeed, it was by Allah’s Help and Power that my son’s ordeal ended; however, when I told my husband about my vow, he got upset because the gold that I had intended to give to the needy was my dowry from him; he asked me why I did that when I could ask him for money instead to fulfill the vow, which he wasn’t going to refuse; he had no more comments on the subject, hence I did not discuss it any further, fearing that I might do something which could hurt his feelings or displease Allah. Four years passed and I still don’t know what to do; someone told me that (for a vow to stand (i.e. to be valid and due to fulfill), you must start it with the intention, expression and form, that is to say: “I make a vow to Allah…”). As for me, I did not utter anything of this sort, but it was an implicit intention in my mind which I considered a vow. Please, tell me what I can do to absolve my conscience, if this is considered a vow.

A. This is not considered a vow and you are not under the obligation to fulfill it; you may give charity (sadaqa), instead, on behalf of your son.
لا نذر بدون الصيغة واللفظ

A. This is a good wish, a prayer to Allah, where (bayyak) means (may He grant you pleasure, hasten for you what you like and assign you to a good position; this is an addition that asserts the meaning of salutation in (hayyaka), i.e. (may He grant you the power of life and grant you pleasure and honor).
معنى حيّاك وبيّاك

Q: Someone told me, if you are adopted you are going to hell in Islam. Please explain this and the halal and haram in the concept of adoption in Islam.

A: Adoption in Islam does not make the adoptee a legal child of the adopter. On the contrary, Islam protects the original identity of the adoptee, be it an orphan or a homeless, by maintaining their connection to their original parents and thus the adopted child cannot become a true native to the adopter’s family but is raised as part of the new family but remains an outsider. This is why it is better, however, to sponsor children rather than adopt them. And if adopted children grow up in a family, respecting them and maintaining their duties toward Allah and that family, why then would they go to hell?

Q. What is your opinion on the lawfulness of gelatin that is found in many foods, especially those that contain beef gelatin with the word (Halal) showing on the containers? Is this enough to consider them lawful to eat?

A. It is ascertained that gelatin undergoes a ‘chemical’ transformation before it settles into its final state. This change from one state to another is considered one of the means of purification; thus, gelatin becomes Halal and is considered pure and lawful to eat. In a more general description, when a food product undergoes transformation which changes its attributes to the point that it becomes a totally different product then it is no longer Haram. This transformation is called "Istihalah". Based on this opinion, gelatin would be Halal, because it results from the hydrolysis (reaction with water) of animal collagen.

Q. Al Safa (www.alsafa.com) food products include meat products and chicken patties or fingers. Are these foods lawful to eat, even though they do not carry labels indicating that they were “slaughtered legally according to Islamic teachings?”

A. If the vendor is a Muslim that confirms their products are made from Halal chicken and beef then it is lawful to buy and eat them.

Relationships (3)

Q: Religiously, is there a difference between male and female masturbation? And are they haram? What if you are not married and fear falling into the haram?

A: Masturbation is not accepted for males or females. Allah says in the Holy Quran: “And those who safeguard their private organs except for their spouses … those are not to be blamed. And whoever wishes beyond that they are the transgressors” (Quran 23:5). Therefore you cannot have sex outside marriage and if you fear falling into the haram then have a wife even in temporary marriage.

Q) Being a newly married Muslim what are the limits for making love to my spouse. (Is anal sex haram or not? is foreplay during menstrual cycle without penetration haram or not? Please specify and what do the different MARJAEYAH say? (Like Sayyed Sistani, Khamenaei, Fadllollah,).

A) Foreplay during the woman’s menstrual cycle is not forbidden only intercourse during that period is forbidden. Also, even though it is not recommended, anal sex is allowed as long as your wife does not object to it or refuse it. This is my fatwa and it is like Sayid Sistani’s fatwa. However, according to Sayid Fadlallah, anal sex is not allowed and I could not verify Sayid Khamenaei’s ruling on that.

Q. The only time I can spend with my husband and to take some rest is between nine and eleven o’clock at night, due to his work and because I follow up with my children’s homework after school. The problem is that I like to wake up for the Night Prayer, in which case I would have to sleep early, and I already know that my husband’s content is also of worship, but which should I give the priority to?

A. Obeying Allah by keeping your husband content is obligatory while the Night Prayer is recommendable; of course, that which is obligatory is more important than that which is recommendable and comes before it, and keeping your husband company as an act with which you seek Allah’s pleasure, Glorified be He, is also of worship.

Khums & Zakat (1)

How do I manage my zakat? Is helping my old parents who need the money considered a part of that zakat and what assets do I pay zakat on?

You cannot pay your zakat to your parents or to your family and kids (if you have any) because it is an Islamic duty upon you to take care of them and provide for them from your own money not religious money.