Advocating for the right of consenting adults to share and enjoy love, sex, residence, and marriage without limits on the gender, number, or relation of participants. Full marriage equality is a basic human right.

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Friday, June 28, 2013

Updating a case we last covered here, a man has been sentenced to life in prison (with the possibility of parole) in Nevada for "incest." Life is an appropriate sentence for rape. I had not previously seen any indication that this was rape, and he wasn't changed with with rape. Remember, the age of consent in Nevada is 16. Here's the the article at elkodaily.com by Dylan Woolf Harris...

A young woman — who five years earlier was a teenage
victim of incest — testified Thursday in Elko District Court to the
humiliation, anger and isolation she has suffered.Rarely
looking up and never at defendant Aaron Hughes, the victim tearfully
read a letter she wrote for the court addressing how the crime affected
her life.

“I have lost so much faith in what is good and what is true,” she said.

That sounds like she is describing being assaulted or abused. But...

The high profile case caused the victim humiliation from which she’s had trouble recovering, she said.

“I
have convinced myself that I have moved on so many times only to have
my feet ripped out from beneath me again and again,” she said. “This
case has been continued for way too long. … I blame (Hughes) for his
mistakes because I’m being dragged through the mud right behind him.”

That doesn't sound like abuse or assault. Those are not "mistakes," those are terrible deliberate acts. So this still sounds like it was consensual. At least of it was caught on video. If it was assault, then it should have been easy to prosecute him for that.

Porter,
bound by statute to sentence Hughes to life in prison for incest with
parole eligibility after two years, had the option of suspending the
sentence and giving the defendant probation.

Porter denied granting Hughes probation, however.

“I think you understand why,” she said to the defendant.

Porter
also denied a request by the defense to allow Hughes a one-day stay
before being taken into custody. Hughes was cuffed and escorted out of
the courtroom by sheriff’s deputies past the near-full courtroom gallery
that included many law enforcement officers as well as Hughes’ and the
victim’s family and friends.

Hughes had been a police officer.

Defense
attorney Tammy Riggs called Dr. William O’Donohue, a licensed
psychologist and professor of psychology at the University of Nevada,
Reno to the stand as an expert witness. O’Donohue evaluated Hughes prior
to the hearing and determined the defendant to be an extremely low risk
to reoffend.

O’Donohue noted in his report that he didn’t find
indicators in Hughes that typically precede relapse into deviant sexual
behavior. He also said Hughes’ social personality, excellent impulse
control, intelligence and otherwise healthy relationships would serve
him well in recovery.

“The final strength is he is not in denial.
One of the most difficult things we have in repeated sex offenders is
they say it didn’t happen. He’s admitting that this happened,” O’Donohue
said.

If it was consensual, he shouldn't have any reason to deny it, other than ridiculous laws against consensual sex.

Hughes was
arrested in 2008. During an investigation related to stolen property
allegations, sheriff’s deputies found a video depicting Hughes and a
17-year-old relative engaging in sexual acts.

No charge or conviction on stolen property?

So what do we have here. The woman didn't complain. Someone else found the video do to what may have been an unrelated investigation and that is how this became a case. Is that why she has suffered, because the law still criminalizes consensual sex in cases like this, and law enforcement chose to pursue this? From reading the full article and past articles on the case, it sounds like the woman would have been just fine if this case had never been brought, and Hughes would be harming nobody. She wasn't suffering in silence and he wasn't preying on anyone.

Is this a travesty? A waste of taxpayer resources? The needless destruction of several lives? We need consistency in our laws. If a young woman of 17 years of age can legally consent to group sex with complete strangers, why not with one person she knows and loves?

A... year later. How many 21-year-olds wait a year before having sex with someone? She could legally consent to sex with an older man who was a complete stranger, but not this man?

Now 24 and 52, respectively, the daughter and
father, who lives in West Jordan, were charged with two counts each of
third-degree felony incest. Police allege both of them knew of their
biological connection.

Again, who complained??? Someone was probably jealous and ratted them out, is my guess. Law enforcement personnel should have said "So what?" and let them be. Any judge who gets this case should toss it out.

There is no good reason these adults should be denied their relationship rights or denied their right to marry. This is yet another example of why the US needs nationwide relationship rights and full marriage equality sooner rather than later.

The Supreme Court of the United States has given victories on marriage, although just about the weakest possible. They issued decisions on the federal DOMA, which denied equal treatment to same-gender marriages under federal law, and California's Proposition 8 (Prop H8). DOMA is dead! In the PropH8 case, they decided those defending the discrimination didn't have standing to defend it.

The basic gist is that progress was made, but the Court did not recognize that there is a right for an adult to marry any and all consenting adults, or even that a gay or lesbian person has a right to the limited same-gender freedom to marry.

So, congratulations to all who will now have their marriage treated equally under federal law & to Californians who will again have the freedom to marry the person they love. But we must remember there are still many people in many states who are denied their right to marry the person or persons they love.

Based upon these survey results, the [polyamorous community]
is significantly more educated, with a Bachelor’s degree being the most
commonly-held degree, while a high school diploma is the most
commonly-held degree among the general US population.

On the polyamous freedom to marry....

LM 2012 respondents were asked, “If it were
legal, would you be open to being married to more than one person
concurrently?” Nearly two-thirds (65.9%) of respondents answered “yes,”
19.7% answered “not sure,” and 14.4% answered “no.”

Poly people should have their right to marry and to have those marriages treated equally under the law.

Again to no one’s surprise, LM respondents reported more frequent
sexual activity and with more partners than the general population. This
was true across genders, lifespan, and behavioral sexual orientations
between the LM population and the general population.

LM respondents were significantly more likely (28.5%) to report
having experienced some form of discrimination compared to the general
US population (5.5%) and more than twice as likely than African
Americans within the US population (12.8%). These results were similarly
significant when analyzed by gender and sexual behavioral orientation.
Ambiguity about having experienced discrimination is far more common
among the LM population (18.4%) as compared to the general US population
(0.13%) and among African Americans surveyed in the GSS (0.0%).

The Summary says...

Compared with the general adult population represented by the GSS,
the LM sample is younger, more educated, happier, healthier, and more
sexually active with more people.

I've said it before... polyamory isn't for everyone, but it is for some. Many people thrive in polyamorous relationships. Poly people should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

P. Sufenas Virius Lupus, a “queer polytheist, author, educator, and poet,” wrote in a column what I consider to be a good call to solidarity for sexual freedom under the law, whether it can be proven that someone is “born this way” or not…

I would hope that the eventual goal of queer activism is not that gay and straight people have equal rights to marriage benefits, employment, adoption and child custody, service in the armed forces, and freedom from discrimination. Certainly all of those goals are admirable and important; but, thinking in those terms just creates further categories of persons that can be potentially limiting. What about bisexuals? What about polyamorous people? What about gender-variant people? While some of these groups might get knock-on benefits from the other equality measures, there are bound to be oversights and misconstructions in doing so.

I actually hope that the eventual positive effect of queer activism is a change in society so that no one is ever bullied for their gender presentation, mannerisms, interests, or romantic attractions; that "gay" is no longer an insult and a synonym for "anything I don't like"; and, for example, that a male who has dated women for his entire life can one day seek out the romantic and sexual companionship of another male without stigma from any corner, nor pressure to identify as one thing or another, and that his doing so is simply yet another option available to a person, like getting one's hair cut or driving a motorcycle.

To put it in more specific terms: the issue isn't so much that sexual orientation is or is not a choice, nor that it is nor is not something inborn, but instead that its origins shouldn't matter because there is no sensible reason (by which I mean scientific reason—but I'd go as far as to say theological reason as well) that sexual orientation or gender identity should be a factor for scorn or discrimination amongst humans.

As I like to say, an adult should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults. Why should anyone spend any time trying to stop other people? And why should anyone spend any time trying to argue against the reality or the worthiness of bisexuality, gender variation, polyamory, consanguinamory, Genetic Sexual Attraction, or anything involving someone else’s identity, orientation, or attraction to other adults? Explaining the possible origins of something that makes someone different is not going to get bigots to suddenly stop being bigots. Throwing others under the bus and jumping through hoops will not change bigots either. Rather, we should all be in solidarity with each other and show open-minded people that the world will not end if we have freedom and equality. All of the nosey, judgmental, and controlling people out there should focus on making themselves better people, and being better in their own relationships. Maybe they will when everyone else has come to the side of equality.

Monday, June 24, 2013

Live-in couple Ali and Lorne use
their home of San Francisco as a playground for “second base parties,”
which is likely not something you took part in back in your Little
League days. “I just have an insatiable appetite for sex,” Ali explains.
“So I like to date like three guys at a time because then no one person
is exhausted.” And everyone is okay with that?

It's not for everyone, but it is for some.

On the season finale of I’m Married To A…,
we meet a polyamorous couple, who explain how they step outside their
relationship to meet their physical needs, ultimately allowing
themselves to fall in love with multiple people to capitalize on the
“abundance” of emotion they have to spare. To practice this lifestyle,
honesty is the best policy, and making sure you define certain feelings
and specific “bases” in the same way is extremely important.

Television producers like to focus on the sex, but for most people in a polyamorous or an open relationship (and no, those are not synonyms) there's a lot more to it than having sex with other people. Sometimes, it is a matter of personalities or shared interests.It is good to see a series showing that not all marriages or relationships have to look the same.

Sunday, June 23, 2013

In the United States there’s a stereotype of cousin marriage being the practice of backward hillbillies or royalty. For typical middle class folk it’s relatively taboo, with different legal regimes by state. The history of cousin marriage in the West has been one of ups & downs. Marriage between close relatives was not unknown in antiquity. The pagan emperor Claudius married his niece Agrippina the Younger, while the Christian emperor Heraclius married his niece Martina. Marriage between cousins were presumably more common.

How did things change?

With the rise in the West of the Roman Catholic Church marriages between cousins were officially more constrained. Adam Bellow argues in In Praise of Nepotism: A Natural History that there’s a material explanation for this: the Roman church used its power over the sacrament of marriage to control the aristocracy.

That’s interesting.

More precisely the coefficient of kinship between two first cousins is 1/8. That means that at any given locus there’s a 1 out of 8 chance that the two individuals will have alleles which are identical by descent, which means that the genetic variant comes down from the same person in the family line.

If the allele is “good,” that is, totally normal/wild type, not associated with any pathology, then we’re in the clear. That’s why most first cousin marriages don’t produce children who are monsters. What a first cousin marriage does is change the odds. How you present these odds matters a great deal in how scary they sound. If I told you than the chance of first cousins having children with a birth defect is 4-7%, vs. 3-4% for a non-consanguineous couple, it might not sound that bad. But if I told you that the odds of having a birth defect is ~50% greater, then it sounds worse.

Saturday, June 22, 2013

Royal incest, notes historian Joanne Carando, was "not only accepted but even encouraged" in Hawaii as an exclusive royal privilege.

In fact, while virtually every culture in recorded history has held sibling or parent-child couplings taboo, royalty have been exempted in many societies, including ancient Egypt, Inca Peru, and, at times, Central Africa, Mexico, and Thailand. And while royal families in Europe avoided sibling incest, many, including the Hohenzollerns of Prussia, the Bourbons of France, and the British royal family, often married cousins. The Spanish Habsburgs, who ruled for nearly 200 years, frequently married among close relatives.

He has the obligatory “this can mess up your genes” talk included, noting…

Siblings share half their genes on average, as do parents and offspring. First cousins' genomes overlap 12.5 percent. Matings between close relatives can raise the danger that harmful recessive genes, especially if combined repeatedly through generations, will match up in the offspring, leading to elevated chances of health or developmental problems—perhaps Tut's partially cleft palate and congenitally deformed foot or Charles's small stature and impotence.

Any child can have health problems. But what doesn’t get talked about enough are the potential positives. Dobbs, thankfully, writes…

And the hazards, while real, are not absolute. Even the high rates of genetic overlap generated in the offspring of sibling unions, for instance, can create more healthy children than sick ones.

Thank you.

Yet affection sometimes drives these bonds. Bingham learned that even after King Kamehameha III of Hawaii accepted Christian rule, he slept for several years with his sister, Princess Nahi'ena'ena—pleasing their elders but disturbing the missionaries. They did it, says historian Carando, because they loved each other.

Imagine that. Some family members love each other in ways that include sexual. That certainly doesn’t fit the bigoted stereotype of “rape and incest.” Nonrelatives can rape or sexually abuse, and relatives can lovingly engage in consensual sex. The problem isn't consanguineous sex; the problem is rape and abuse. Loving, consensual, consanguineous sex should not be kept buried with the royals of the past. It should be brought into the open and enjoyed by all who want to share the tradition old as time.

I’m
a straight guy in my early 30s with an amazing girlfriend of two years.
A few months ago, I felt open enough to share my taboo fantasy:
father-daughter incest. My GF, to my delight, not only understands the
fantasy but enjoys participating in it!

The US Supreme Court has heard arguments about
both DOMA and Prop H8 and could issue a ruling any day now. DOMA denies same-gender marriages recognition at the
national level and has been very problematic, including for members of the US
military and immigrants. Prop H8 took away the same-gender freedom to marry in
California. Cases about both laws had been making their way through the courts
and are now at the Supreme Court. There are many possible outcomes, some seen
as more likely than others. It is possible that the Court could end up ruling next month,
in June, to strike down DOMA so that same-gender marriages granted in
states that currently have them will be recognized by the federal government,
and letting lower court decisions striking down Prop H8 stand, so that
California will again have the limited same-gender freedom to marry. It is also
possible the Court may rule in a way that brings about the limited same-gender
freedom to marry nationwide.

We want the US Supreme Court to make the best possible
ruling, which is to recognize relationship rights, including full marriage equality, for all adults nationwide.

The Court should rule that…

An
adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion,
should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and
all consenting adults, without prosecution, harassment, or
discrimination.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

This is a short
story of a consensual sibling love affair between a guy named Johnny
and his older sister, Shannon. Yeah, I'm Johnny..

So Shannon and I
grew up as 100% blood siblings in a normal, healthy family. A Dad, a
Mom, 2 kids, a cat, a tortoise, and 2 dogs. Nice neighborhood.

We were happy
teenagers back in the 1970's. Shannon was 2 years older than me, and
she was a "beautiful female specimen". Yeah, I obviously grew up
watching "Star Trek" on prime time TV in the late 60's, and after that I
watched the reruns of "Star Trek" over and over again in the 1970's.

South Korean filmmakers called on a
government ratings' agency to lift an effective ban on the screening in
the country of director Kim Ki-duk's latest film about incest.

"Moebius" received a "restricted screening" rating at the Korea Media
Ratings Board (KMRB) on June 1 for including content "harmful to youth"
as well as "unethical and unsocial" expressions.

The movie tells the story of a man who is raised up in a family destroyed by the father's affair and renounces the world.

Films classified for "restricted screening" can only be seen at
theaters dedicated only to such films. Since South Korea does not have a
single theater of that kind, the decision means Kim's new film cannot
be shown in his home country.

Kylie's latest novel deals with one of our deepest taboos: sexual attraction between blood relatives.It's an idea that has come from the phenomenon of 'genetic sexual attraction', which suggests long-lost siblings, who first meet as adults, have a very high possibility of being sexually attracted to each other.

I want to clarify that Genetic Sexual Attraction can happen not only between siblings, but between parents and their adult children, and between aunts/uncles and nieces/nephews. I'm glad that the subject was mentioned on the program.

Or perhaps pluck them out? Actually, while Oedipus Rex is famous ancient theatre that includes what today might be described as mother-son Genetic Sexual Attraction, I haven't heard of anyone in modern times having this reaction. But then, the guy did kill his own father, and maybe that had something to do with it? Chris Boyd reviews a theatrical production that is another take on this ancient tale and the review can be found at theaustralian.com...

Anne-Louise Sarks and Benedict Hardie in By Their Own Hands. Picture: Pia Johnson

THEATREBy Their Own Hands
By Benedict Hardie and Anne-Louise Sarks.
The Hayloft Project, Melbourne Theatre Company Southbank Theatre, The Lawler, June 14.

THE Hayloft Project's take on the Oedipus story obsesses over the
nuts and bolts of the incestuous relationship with the same kind of
lurid curiosity that the Learning Channel showed to "extreme cougar
wives" and their three, four and five-decade-younger lovers.
Like last year'sOn the Misconception of Oedipus this play fingers
incest as if it were a bruise, as if there were things to be gleaned
from re-experiencing the pain. Implicitly, mother on son incest is
"nicer", apparently, than father on daughter.

Friday, June 14, 2013

I’m married to a wonderful man and we practice responsible non-monogamy. We’ve been together for over three years and we have always been open. He’s been with his secondary partner for two years now. We all practice open, honest communication.

In November, 2009 I had my first baby, a boy. He’s the best, cutest baby in the world and I want to be the best mother I can be for him.

Later…

We’re not swingers, our secondary relationships are often committments, real, meaningful relationships that exist on their own. We don’t restrict each other sexually, but we do have rules we try to respect.

We’re also not looking outside our marriage because we’re unhappy in our marriage. But we are happy in our marriage because we look outside it. We probably wouldn’t have gotten married if we didn’t have an open relationship. It’s something we share and it’s part of our mutual trust and respect for each other.

I make every effort keep my personal life separate from my work life. My activism and activity online is always under a pseudonym and while I am an activist for my lifestyle and other issues, I do not intend to allow that to enter the classroom. I am here to do a job, and espousing my lifestyle, religion and other beliefs do not enter into that.

The truth is, my love life is not much different from a single person’s. If I were a single person, nobody would be surprised to find me dating someone or if I had a series of relationships. Similarly, if I were divorced, nobody would think it odd that I had a boyfriend but still had contact with my husband and custody of my child. The difference is my relationships are concurrent.

That is a very good point. Teachers should not be discriminated against for being married to one person in a heterosexual marriage and being monogamous, or for sharing an occasional lover with the spouse, or for being unmarried and dating, or for being married to someone of the same sex, or for being in a polyamorous polycule, or for abstaining from sex, dating, and marriage entirely. The question is, can the person teach?

I should emphasise that my relationships are not about sex. Furthermore, I am not a sex addict or a sexual predator and what goes on between consenting adults is none of the school’s business.

If you were a Principal or Superintendent over a school and one of your best teachers was outed a polyamorous with other teachers or with parents and students expressing concern, how would you handle it? If you had a child in that teacher's class, and other parents wanted you to join them in calling for the teacher's removal, what would you say? You may have to live this out in real life. Poly people are everywhere, and it is harder and harder to keep personal lives private.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Consensual Incest? (U of M Campus)

Have you ever participated in consensual incestious lust/love with a
close relative? Close relatives include father, mother, brother, sister,
cousins, aunt, uncle, or grandparents. If so then here is your chance
to tell your story and to let the world know that this happens at a much
larger scale that is known. Everything will be anonymous and no names
will be distribute. If you are wondering why I am so interested in this
is due to the fact that I am conducting research on this project and
will present my findings to my peers and professor. I am a current
senior at the University of Michigan and I figured that I would try to
obtain willing volunteers to discuss this topic in a safe environment to
help educate our society of a very taboo topic that not too long ago
was not. If you wouldn't mind helping me out anonymously then you can
email me through this site and we can make plans to meet this week. Just
so that my findings are accurate, I would need to meet with each
willing participant in person and ask the questions with a recorder. You
will be able to let me know what you feel comfortable being recorded
and what you don't. So if this at all seems interesting to you, please
contact me as soon as possible. I would like to be done with this part
of my research by the end of this coming up week. This is all to educate
the public.

Location: U of M Campus

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

it's OK to distribute this charitable volunteerism opportunity for
inclusion in 3rd party web sites that have been approved by craigslist

Incest has been a topic for all of human history in the stories we tell each other, because incest has always been a part of life. The word "incest" can apply to the ugly reality of assault and molestation or to the beautiful reality of consensual sex (consanguinamory). These days, consanguineous sex between consenting adults is often portrayed as something only troubled, disturbed people would do. Which of these is going on in Kim Ki-duk's movie "Moebius" I can't be sure, but it might be closest to the latter. According to Pierce Conran at twitchfilm.com, the Korea Media Ratings Board has a problem with the movie.

In
a letter sent to the KMRB, Kim stated that the mother-son incest
element of the film (which he believes is the cause of the agency's
restrictive ruling) is a necessary element to his story. He further
explained that when taken in context of the overall narrative, this
deviant relationship takes on a different meaning. Kim wrote that the
inclusion of the scenes was 'an inevitable choice' for him. If the film
fails to secure a more lenient rating, Kim said he will reimburse cast
and crew out of his own pocket.

On the reevaluation request, the director summarized the
movie as the story in which “The jealousy and anger of the couple who
lost faith are passed on to their son, making everyone live in guilt and
sorrow, which eventually leads to giving up of pleasure and desire.” I
know this summary doesn’t help much, and one would have to watch the
movie to get what he’s saying.

The director also added that, “Even though physically, the
son’s body is used, if you watch the movie carefully, the meaning is
different … it’s an important tool which was inevitable to express the
concept.”

Without arguing whether or not a ratings board should be able to effectively censor a movie, I'll just offer that I would be disturbed by assault or child molestation being depicted as positive. It should be depicted, and depicted as negative. It shouldn't be swept under the rug and ignored. Of course, I also support the depiction of consensual sex between adults in a positive light in general, and that includes consanguinamory. Yes, sometimes consensual sex happens for bad reasons or between people who aren't right for each other or it is unsatisfying, but it is dishonest for consanguinamory to never be depicted as a good thing. It shouldn't have to be a bad thing or done by disturbed characters within the context of a story for a depiction to be allowed.

It doesn't matter that the hopeful groom was well into adulthood when she married his father.

It doesn't matter that the marriage only lasted three years.

It doesn't matter that she was left by that husband.

It doesn't matter that they are close in age.

The ridiculous laws say she is a stepmother to him, that such a relationship means they are to be denied their right to marry, and even the President can't do anything about it until the law is changed.

France has been friendly to consanguinamory, but when it comes to marriage, even though there is no blood relation, the discrimination continues.

As the law stands now, this couple can only marry if the hopeful groom's father dies/

How stupid is that?

Liberty? Equality? Hardly!

Lawmakers in France and just about every other country need to remedy the inequalities and inconsistencies sooner rather than later. It is simple, really. Rather than quibbling over which adults get which rights, just adopt a blanket approach: an adult, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion, should be free to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adults, without prosecution, bullying, or discrimination.

By the way, the article gives no indication of what the hopeful groom's father thinks of all of this. At some time, he wanted this woman. Why is it surprising his son wants her now?

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

She received a latter from someone in authority of the facility where the intended groom is held. That person with veto power will making a decision soon. In the mean time, the lovers who want to marry can submit things like:

evidence that they have lived together (what if they don't want to do that until they marry?)

letters of supprt from members of both immediate families expressing support for the union (really? other people in your family have to approve?)

statements from both lovers of intent to get premarital counseling (generally a good idea, but required?)

official documents and informal personal statements about the bride-to-be's criminal record (again, it was the "crime" of loving another consenting adult, so it sounds like they want her to say her relationship was all wrong and she deserved her criminal sentence)

a plan about how any children, theirs or otherwise, will be protected from the groom-to-be (the implication being a woman who has no kids and hates having kids around would be more likely to pass this test)

The implication is that if they do these things, they might be allowed to marry. This is despite the fact that if the groom-to-be was not incarcerated, nobody would look into criminal records or require passing any of these other tests. The bride-to-be is now asked to submit paperwork as though she is asking for parole, despite the fact that she finished her sentence years ago.

What is the harm of letting them marry?

If you're free to marry the person you love, realize how fortunate you are that nobody else can have a veto over your marriage, because so many people in the world, even in supposedly modern countries, aren't allowed their rights.

Monday, June 10, 2013

You can find a lot of interesting stuff on Tumblr. You have to wonder if that's going to change moving forward now that it is being swallowed up by Yahoo. (Youngsters: look up "GeoCities.") For now, you can find things like Gay Brotherly Love, which is relevant to this blog. (For those of you unfamiliar with Tumblr, you can find much there that is NOT SAFE FOR WORK, so be warned. Here's what GBL is about...

A blog devoted to
consensual male-male incest by a guy who had sex with his step brothers
as a teenager and wants to connect with other guys who've had similar
experiences with their brothers, male cousins, fathers and uncles.
Consensual sex between guys who are related is taboo in most cultures,
but it shouldn't be.

GBL has text, as do many tumblrs, but tumblrs can also have images and GIFs, including sexual images. There is much consanguinamory fantasy on Tumblr, which I can appreciate, but it is especially good to see actual statements supporting consanguinamorous relationships.

I am bumping this up to let everyone know that Kindred Spirits forum is staying at the old site, and as of this morning seems to be working fine.

So many services refused to allow this kind of discussion, unfortunately. It is part of the overall sex-negative attitude and bigotry against consensual adult relationships.

Frequently on this blog I have noted that Kindred Spirits forum is the best place I know of to discuss consanguinamorous relationships in a free forum that isn't a porn site, doesn't allow predators or wanna-be predators, and isn't overrun with spam. Whether the consanguinamory is current or past, or whether it was initiated through Genetic Sexual Attraction or not, you're welcome to discuss it there.

If you want to discuss your experiences with your cousins, siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, adult children... any consanguineous or consanguinamorous encounters or relationships, check it out. Be sure to read AND immediately follow all of the rules, or they will kick you right out.

Sunday, June 9, 2013

One of the frustrating things in the struggle for relationship rights for all adults is an assumption of monogamy-as-ideal in so much media, and this Dear Abby answer (second question) is a perfect example. A "Carlos" in Texas wrote...

I'm 14 and haven't had a girlfriend yet, but I'm curious about something. When I do have one, will it mean I can't love other girls?Lots of girls tell me I'm nice, friendly and helpful. I love them. When I have a girlfriend or get married, I won't be able to stop loving others. Is this wrong, Abby?

This would be an ideal response...

No, it isn't wrong. Some people are polyamorous. That means that they are oriented towards having relationships with more than one person, with the consent and agreement of all involved. Some people your age know they are polyamorous. Some polyamorous people don't understand or accept that they're polyamorous until they are older. Others find that some other form of ethical nonmonogamy is best for them. There's also a chance you will find that monogamy suits you best, but you are currently going through emotional growing pains.

What is important is that you are honest with yourself, and honest with your potential partners about who you are, what you have to offer, and what you need. That may take some time and experience to figure out. If it turns out you are polyamorous, you'll need partners who accept that you are, whether they are polyamorous or not, just like you'll need to accept your partners for who they are, if you want them as partners.

But this is what was given as the response...

There are varying degrees of love. There is nothing wrong with loving women, as long as you don't love them all at the same time. If you do, it may upset your girlfriend or wife.When you are ready for a permanent relationship, the feelings you will have for the woman you're involved with will be stronger than those you are feeling now. However, if that doesn't happen, consider it an indication that you either aren't ready to settle down or you were meant to be a bachelor.

Let's review the options given to Carlos (and, by extension, millions of other people in like situations)...

1. Monogamy with a girlfriend or wife
2. Bachelorhood without a girlfriend

There is also "not ready," which presumes one of the two options listed above are the ultimate destination. What does Dear Abby mean by bachelorhood? Hook ups? Celibacy? Something else?

Friday, June 7, 2013

While Canada has the limited same-sex freedom to marry, not only has a B.C. court recently rejected the polygamous freedom to marry, the country of Canada as a whole is still denying the freedom to marry to some same-sex couples. Corneilius is in such a relationship, and generously agreed to be interviewed for this blog. Even though English isn’t his first language, I think you’ll agree he communicates well their love, affection, and hopes. [Note: I am bumping up this old entry because it is still as relevant as ever.]

***

FME: Describe your background.

Corneilius: We were both born sort of on the outskirts of a small Russian ”hick” town and grew up together in a large family. The two of us and our grandfather were the only males. We had a few sisters, an aunt, and our mother in the same house with us. After our grandfather died, we moved to a Canada. Now, we live in a small town again.

We even shared a bed for a good amount of time after [my brother] grew out of his crib. I am older than him by two and a half years and we’re now in our mid-twenties. During our childhood, we were a little more close than most of the brothers we knew. We had almost that "Twin" quality. We were always seen together. Probably because we had a bit of a different view on life than most. For example, our grandfather taught us about forest trolls and it took us ages for our belief in them to die down. But we still spend as much time as we can in forested areas. Probably to remind us of that time in life.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

This blog argues for relationship rights for all adults, including the freedom of an adult to marry any and all consenting adults. This blog strongly condemns abuse, especially preying on children. Lovemaking and sex between adults are entirely different things than assault and molestation of children.

Unfortunately, false accusations of assault or molestation are sometimes made for various reasons, such as to gain an upper hand in a custody dispute. One of the truly awful things about false allegations is that they can make things more difficult for the many people are are actually abused, who already have more than enough to deal with.

I have been witnessing the pain of an Australian woman being denied her freedom to marry the man she loves.

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

I found this ad at a website that appears to be one for all sorts of ads...

Wanted: Looking for people who have experienced Genetic Sexual Attraction

Camperdown NSW 2050

Date Listed:

04/06/2013

Last Edited:

04/06/2013

Looking for people who have experienced GSA (Genetic Sexual Attraction)
A Sydney production company is researching GSA for a documentary
aimed at raising awareness and removing the stigma around GSA. They
would love to hear from you if you have had any experience with GSA or
know someone who has. Full privacy and anonymity is guaranteed if
required. Financial compensation will be considered depending on the
participants level of involvement with the project.
Please contact: mygsastory@gmail.com

My immediate question is, why didn't the production company identify themselves? Is that against the rules of the site where the ad appeared? Even if this "production company" turns out to be just one person, wouldn't a serious producer at least have a Facebook page?

Anyway, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt in that respect, for the sake of moving on...

I would very much like to see a good production that deals with Genetic Sexual Attraction honestly and in a positive way. Although the ad gives the impression that is their plan and promises privacy an anonymity, I always caution anyone who responds to ads or solicitations like this to be very careful. Media productions are often edited for an agenda that might not be supportive or ethical. If the producers think it is to their benefit, they may portray GSA in general in a negative light or any given person or relationships in a negative light. Also, the kind of attention one might garner from being involved can bring many challenges
and complications, especially since consanguinamory is still illegal in Australia.

If the
producers handle things well, this could be a very good thing for people who are experiencing or have experienced GSA and for relationship rights in general, including full marriage equality.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Casting for women who live a polyandrous lifestyle. Seeking only
those in serious relationships or with families. Preferably those who
can recognize and comment on the social, economic, and political
influence of they're lifestyle.

I am thinking of a few women who might be good for this.

I am cautiously optimistic that someone is going to put together a good documentary or series featuring polyandrous families. Polyandry needs to be depicted more, with honesty. People need to know it is an option and that there are people living in such relationships. On the other hand, even "reality" shows are edited for the sake of getting audience attention. This could be good, or it could be bad. If the producers think it is to their benefit, they may portray polyandry in general in a negative light or any given person in the show in a negative light. Also, this form of fame can bring many challenges and complications.

If the producers handle things well, this could be a very good thing for polyamorous people and relationship rights in general, including full marriage equality.

Monday, June 3, 2013

Good Gabble Reviews has a new review of a novel of interest to this blog. I recommend Good Gabble in general, but this is especially of interest. The novel is Into my Arms by Kylie Ladd, and it is a love story that involves Genetic Sexual Attraction. The reviewer has personal experience with GSA.

Kylie shows compassion for the
topic. Until one actually experiences the immense emotions and push and
pull GSA creates, one can not fully understand it, but within Into My Arms Kylie Ladd
has given the reader a deeper understanding of the intensity involved.
Her characters correctly display the push pull and immense need. I did
feel the story played down the turmoil GSA causes within the extended
family unit but will acknowledge that this is different in all
situations depending on the family dynamics.

Into My Arms
is more than GSA. It is a story of love, passion, family, unity, need
and conflict.

There are going to be more novels and memoirs with Genetic Sexual Attraction as one of the elements. Publishers and others in media, including filmmakers, should not avoid this reality. GSA is likely to increase in the coming years due to realities of today's world, and there are some fascinating, powerful stories to be told, with everything from intense, beautiful passion to struggle, persecution, and courtroom drama. Even a thought-provoking romantic comedy, if it handles the situation well, can break barriers.

Statistically, it is almost a certainty that people in positions of power at major publishing houses and Hollywood studios have personal experience with GSA. Wouldn't it be great to help clear away the ignorance and stigma surrounding the topic?

Jessica Sexxxton, 56, and her daughter, Monica, 22, have been
shooting sex scenes together for the last 18 months for their own
self-titled website, sometimes sharing the same partner, but not at the
same time and never with each other -- a technicality that keeps their
films from being legally considered incest.

Now the Tampa, Fla.-based twosome are hoping to take their unorthodox
relationship to the next level, with a nationwide search for a real
father and son willing to shoot a porn film scene with them.

"It's something we've considered for a while," Jessica Sexxxton told
The Huffington Post. "We once dated brothers in real life on and off for
a couple of years. They were closer to [Monica's] age, but we haven't
done a father and son in real life or on camera."

This was also covered at bhaskar.com and ibtimes.com. Of course some of the people covering this call it disgusting, but they've chosen to focus on it and write about it anyway. Hmm. I wonder how much "research" they are doing on these women and their videos?

As my readers know, I don't think there should be any laws restriction what this mother and daughter do with each other on or off-camera, and same goes for any male performers they may work with. They are consenting adults, after all.

Consanguinamory is a very popular theme in erotica, and has always been a theme in literature, theatre, and mythology because it has always been a part of life. I wonder what we'd find in the love lives of people who make a point of badmouthing the love lives of other consenting adults (fictional or real)? That someone who isn't involved thinks that consenting adults are doing something disgusting with each other should have no power to stop those consenting adults from enjoying each other and loving each other.

Full Marriage Equality

About This Blog

I argue for marriage equality. By that I mean that society and all local, state, federal, and international laws, institutions, and programs should recognize any marriage registered by any persons without restrictions on the basis of race, color, creed, ancestry, national origin, sex, gender, sexual orientation, or religion.

The global definition of marriage should be as follows: "The uniting of consenting individuals in a witnessed ceremony."

We believe everyone has the right to share love, sex, residence, and marriage with any and all consenting adult(s) of their choice, regardless of birth or sexual orientation.

The Fine Print

The focus of this blog is consenting adults. This blog does not advocate anyone engage in activity that is currently illegal in their jurisdiction; it does advocate changing or repealing any law that prevents the freedom of association, love, and full marriage equality for adults. This blog condemns rape, sexual assault, and child molestation, and frowns in the general direction of cheating. This blog exists mainly to evaluate information and direct others to information about current events; it does not provide medical, therapeutic, legal, financial, or cooking advice. This blog links to other sites for informational purposes; it does not necessarily support everything at those links.