Netflix is Looking For Oscars With This BeastsOfNoNation Trailer

This movie is going to be harrowing. Cary Fukunaga, who directed the first season of True Detective, wrote and helmed this adaptation of Uzodinma Iweala’s novel of the same name about a young boy forced into the life of a child soldier in West Africa. Beasts will get a simultaneous theatrical rollout alongside its Netflix premiere, and if Idris Elba plays the role of child-snatching warlord with half the intensity we know he’s capable of, it’s not crazy to think he could garner the streaming service’s first Academy Award nomination. Prepare to clutch your chest for two straight hours when this comes out.

Pause At: 1:03. This face. This poor, tiny face. Seriously these are just kids at 1:19!Essential Quote: “Agu, you are going to kill this man.” Commandant (Idris Elba)

StarWars Snuck a New Teaser Onto Instagram

You already know that Instagram has expanded its canvas to include both portrait and landscape orientations. But what you should have anticipated is that Lucasfilm would find a way to leverage that. And leverage they did, with a new teaser IG video that shows Finn (John Boyega) ready to battle Kylo Ren (Adam Driver) in Star Wars: The Force Awakens. May the filters be with you.

Mr.Robot Finale Postponed in Wake of Virginia TV Station Shooting

Christopher Saunders/USA Network

Citing similarities between the show’s finale and today’s tragic shooting at a Virginia TV station, USA Network says it will postpone tonight’s finale of Mr. Robot.

“The previously filmed season finale of Mr. Robot contains a graphic scene similar in nature to today’s tragic events in Virginia,” the network said in a statement. “Out of respect to the victims, their families and colleagues, and our viewers, we are postponing tonight’s episode.”

The episode will now air on Sept. 2. The network didn’t elaborate on how the scene from the finale is similar to the events today, in which a person shot and killed a cameraman and reporter during a live televised interview. For more on the shooting in Virginia, go here.

The previously filmed season finale of Mr. Robot contains a graphic scene similar in nature to today’s tragic events in Virginia.

New HungerGames Banner Gives All New Meaning to #SquadGoals

Lionsgate

The new Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 2 promotional banner is called “Fallen Snow” and depicts Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) and her fellow rebels surrounding a toppled statue of President Snow (Donald Sutherland). The image, above, was revealed after fans clicked a map of the Capitol in new microsite 11,202,015 times in one hour. How’s that for #SquadGoals?

Here’s the Lego JurassicWorld You’ve Been Waiting For

Jurassic World was pretty fun. Like, a bajillion people now agree on this. But if you want to relive it without spending another two hours and $15 at a theater, this 90-second Lego re-enactment pretty much hits all the highlights. Oh, and it lets you (sort of) see Chris Pratt as a Lego minifig again. Enjoy!

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Chances are you’ll never get to ride in an X-wing with R2-D2 as co-pilot, but Japan’s All Nippon Airways has what must be the next best thing: a commercial jetliner painted to resemble your favorite droid.

To celebrate and promote the seventh Star Wars film, set for release in December, the airline decorated a Boeing 787-9 Dreamliner with an R2-D2 livery, which it showed off in April. Now it’s adding two planes to the fleet: a 777-300ER representing BB-8, the new droid, and a 767-300 with both charming robots.

The jets start flying domestic and international routes this fall, and the airline says it will be the first to offer all six Star Wars movies as in-flight entertainment.

If any more of these jets are coming, we vote for something more exciting: the Millennium Falcon, maybe, or at least a TIE fighter.

Today’s Lesson is Don’t Get High With Bill Hader

For a certain and probably large segment of the population, the idea of getting real high in Amsterdam with the cast of Trainwreck might sound like the best idea ever. Amy Schumer! Players from Saturday Night Live! Legal drugs! But as with everything else in life, it’s all fun and games until you lose your moon-faced friend in the middle of the Red Light district and she has to find her way back to the United States on her own. Thankfully, Vanessa Bayer is made of strong stuff, and she made it back home just in time to catch her friend Bill Hader on Late Night. Let’s just hope she comes down before SNL returns in October (with back-in-action Tracey Morgan as host!).

LastWeekTonightwithJohnOliver Is Your New Religion

John Oliver is not shy when it comes to taking on massive topics on Last Week Tonight. From food waste to FIFA he’s not afraid of a hot-button issue. Last night he took on one of the most sacred cows of all: televangelists. In a righteously angry 20-minute segment he blasted “churches that exploit people’s faith for monetary gain.” Then after giving televangelists the what for over their lavish lifestyles, he decided to take advantage of the same tax codes they use and founded his own church. Welcome to Our Lady of Perpetual Exemption. Services are held every Sunday at his studio in New York. Watch the first gathering of Oliver’s devoted—including Rachel Dratch!—above.

MastersofSex GIF and a Graf: A Proper Courtship

Showtime

Does anyone do Oddly Appealing Creep better than Josh Charles? Sure, he’s played some very nice guys, but the current one-two punch of his role as Blake on Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp to his new role as a perfume magnate on Masters of Sex, he’s showing again what is right in the center of his wheelhouse. As Dan Logan on Mos, he’s a guy looking for help from Bill Masters (Michael Sheen) and Virginia Johnson (Lizzy Caplan) to find a scent that causes arousal. He’s also looking to arouse Virginia. So when he tells her she deserves “what we might call a proper courtship” it seems to remind her of something that might be missing. This is obvious when—after being forced to tryst at their office to avoid being recognized in public—Virginia tells Bill that starting their “relationship in a lab is hardly a proper courtship.” She’s right, of course. Their relationship never had a lot of romance. By the end of last night’s episode it seems like Bill is willing to woo, but is it too little too late?

Attention, Binge Fans: TheKnick is Now on HBO Go

Cinemax

So you read our Binge Guide for The Knick this week, but you don’t have Cinemax, and you weren’t all that happy about buying the whole season on iTunes. Before you head down some ethically compromised and legally shady means of catching up on the Steven Soderbergh’s turn-of-the-(20th)-century hospital drama, you have another option! HBO has come to the rescue, making the show’s first season available on its streaming/on-demand/a la carte services. So drop that torrent and instead pick up an outdated and barbaric surgical instrument, because things are about to get bloody entertaining.

This New Protest Song from Janelle Monae’s Wondaland Team Is Massive

The R&B maven assembled her whole stable of Wondaland Records artists—Deep Cotton, St. Beauty, Jidenna, Roman GianArthur—as well as her polymath associate George 2.0 to construct this pounding tribute to black Americans who have been the victims of police brutality or racially-motivated attacks. Amidst urgent percussion and chants they simply shout the names of those who’ve died and demand we say their names. Eric Garner, Freddie Gray, Walter Scott, and more are memorialized on “Hell You Talmbout.” The group has issued a statement explaining their intention behind the track, which comes a day after Monáe and Jidenna participated in a police brutality protest in Philadelphia.

The forthcoming Wondaland EP The Eephus was originally slated for a May release, but the latest rumor says it will finally drop tomorrow, Aug. 14th, as the group embarks on their tour of select shows across the country. “Hell You Talmbout” won’t be on the album, but the emotionally urgent protest anthem will likely be an intense performance piece if you’re lucky enough to catch them on tour. Just listen.

Winona Ryder Says There Might Be a Beetlejuice Sequel

Goddess of the underworld Winona Ryder was on Late Night with Seth Meyers last night and revealed that … she watched an interview with Tim Burton in which he revealed that Beetlejuice 2 is happening and that she is in it.

Here’s a transcript of what Ryder said:

Seth Meyers: There has been talk of a sequel to Beetlejuice. Can you confirm or deny this?

Winona Ryder: Um, I think I can confirm it. Because Tim Burton did this interview. Like, it was very hush-hush top secret, “Oh I don’t know, it might happen, I don’t know,” and then he was doing some press for Big Eyes and he did an on-camera interview and he said, “Oh yeah, we’re doing it, and Winona’s gonna be in it. And I was like [makes IRL ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ gesture] …so can I say? I mean if he said it then I can.

Meyers: If he said then you can, it’s just, it’s on the record now.

Ryder: Yeah, but I really don’t know much more than anybody.

And that was good enough for the Internet, which is screaming today that the movie is sure to happen. As Ryder herself lip-syncs at very end of Beetlejuice, “OK, I believe you!“

Hannibal GIF and a Graf: Tyger Tyger, Burning Bright

NBC

Allusions to William Blake were all over this week’s episode of Hannibal, which makes sense when examining a killer obsessed with the poet’s Great Red Dragon paintings. But still, it’s unusual for a broadcast television show to go all-in with tidbits that require at least an art history and/or English minor to fully unpack. For example, Hannibal (Mads Mikkelsen) quotes a line from The Tyger when talking to his new murder-friend/mentee Francis Dolarhyde (Richard Armitage)—”Did he who made the lamb make thee?”—in reference to the wonder of both peaceful and deadly creatures existing. And by the end of the episode, Dolarhyde has physically consumed Blake’s original watercolor The Great Red Dragon and the Woman Clothed with the Sun, which he believes will give him more power for his transformation. Will Graham (Hugh Dancy) catches up with Dolarhyde as he makes his elevator escape from the Brooklyn Museum, but the killer gets away. Lecter, using some phone trickery, has surmised Will’s home address, and now that Will has closed in on Dolarhyde it looks like the Blake enthusiast will be asking his new friend for some information to help locate his next target.

MastersofSex GIF and a Graf: Betty Is a Miracle Worker

Showtime

Masters of Sex isn’t a comedy, but it definitely has funny moments. And while there isn’t one designated court jester on the show—everyone gets a moment of funny or two—the comic relief is most often brought by Betty DiMello (Annaleigh Ashford), the prostitute-turned-office-manager at Bill Masters (Michael Sheen) and Virginia Johnson’s (Lizzy Caplan) practice. Last night’s episode was no different. After slipping a disc, Bill goes into the office in serious pain. Betty, in her infinite awesomeness, knows exactly what to do to fix him because her sometimes-girlfriend Helen (Sarah Silverman) has sciatica and is “too vain to give up high heels.” This is Betty in a nutshell: Fixing problems, never questioning why, but secretly knowing everything. Bless you, Betty. Bless you.

The New Vin Diesel Trailer: TheLastWitchHunter

OK, so the premise here is a little nuts: Vin Diesel saves the world from the worst witches of all time. But once it sinks in, it actually sounds like a lot of fun. Diesel plays Kaulder, an immortal who has been fighting the forces of evil for years and is now teaming up with a man of the cloth (played by Elijah Wood) to face down the biggest threat to humanity yet. In other words, Diesel is just doing Diesel—only this time he’s doing it to witches. Sounds good!Pause at: 0:08 for Vin Diesel’s massive beard. 1:01 for Ygritte, er, Chloe (Rose Leslie). 1:30 for a creepy monster thingamabob. 1:55 for a scary-ass witch.Essential Quote: “You know what I’m afraid of? Nothing.”—Kaulder (Diesel)

The WetHot Doc Trailer: HurricaneofFun

Back in 2000, a bunch of State alums and their friends went out into the woods to make what would become the cult classic Wet Hot American Summer. During that time some 25 hours of behind-the-scenes footage was shot. Now, just in time for the release of Netflix’s Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp series, you can finally watch that footage for yourself in director Amy Rice’s Hurricane of Fun: The Making of Wet Hot. This doc, which is now available on Netflix and iTunes, is pretty much everything you need on this Earth. You’re welcome.Pause at: 1:02 for baby Bradley Cooper. Pause anywhere for much younger versions of everyone who is anyone in comedy right now.Essential Quote: “I’m just hoping that not just us will see this film. I have a feeling it’s going to be a great home video.”—Janeane Garofalo

Chance the Rapper and Lil B Just Dropped a Free Mixtape

Frank Ocean announced his new album Boys Don’t Cry would be out in July. But even though his website has been updated with some cryptic new clues to signify that a “surprise” album release is imminent, it has yet to materialize. Chance the Rapper and Lil B have come to the rescue, dropping a free six-track mixtape on SoundCloud. Free (Based Freestyles Mixtape) is apparently what the two rappers were up to two weeks ago when Chance posted about meeting Lil B on Instagram. It is also definitely what you need to vibe to on this summer hump day. Check it out above.

There’s a New VR Film Fest, and It May Be Headed Your Way

A still from Colosse. Joseph Chen

It seems like only yesterday we were talking about what to do with virtual reality offerings at traditional film festivals. Starting this month, that may not be a huge concern—because VR is getting a film festival of its own.

The Kaleidoscope VR Film Festival is a traveling fest that will hit 10 cities in the US and Canada starting Aug. 22 in Portland. Each stop will have a series of experiences available on Samsung Gear VR and Oculus VR headsets. The slate of 20 VR movies includes director Vincent Morisset’s Way to Go, which hit the Sundance Film Festival earlier this year, and producer Joseph Chen’s Colosse (pictured above), which directs the viewers’ experience based on where their gaze falls. The line-up, which you can find here, is intended to give independent VR filmmakers exposure the way other fests champion indie directors.

“[Sundance founder Robert] Redford wanted to create an institution that would support and nurture independent filmmakers,” says René Pinnell, the co-founder of VR agency Kaleidoscope. “That’s the same inspiration we have for starting the Kaleidoscope VR Film Festival. We want to highlight the amazing independent artists who are inventing the new language of virtual reality cinema.”

In addition to Portland, the festival, which is being put on be Kaleidoscope and VR video platform Vrideo, will travel to Seattle, Vancouver, San Francisco, Los Angeles, Denver, Montreal, Toronto, New York, and Austin.

The Ruin Your Day With Sad Trailer: TheLeftovers Season 2

Sadness, misery, hopelessness, sadness, broken dreams.

Liv Tyler is still smoking. Ann Dowd is still creeping. Justin Theroux is still searching. Looks like bleak business as usual for all The Leftovers, except in Season 2 the Garvey family is leaving Mapleton in their rearview and heading for Miracle, Texas, where no Departures were recorded. There are lots of familiar faces, but lots of new ones, too. Who is ready to see who gets it the worst this season?!Pause at: 0:27. Who the hell is this watcher?! Casual lawn maintenance at 1:05. Oh, she’s still here at 1:41.Song: Ruelle, “Take It All”Essential Quote: “I could sit around and cry about how the world ended, or I could start it up again.”—Kevin Garvey Sr. (Scott Glenn)

Seth Meyers Just Unleashed the Best TrueDetective Send-Up Yet

Before last night, the best audience participation game show segment on Late Night with Seth Meyers was probably “Fake or Florida,” but after the introduction of “Fortune Cookie or True Detective Quote,” it’s now a race for second place between all the other segments. It’s a spot-on indictment of the incoherent maelstrom taking over the second season. Meyers renames all the contestants with True Detective-appropriate characters like Artemis Bogdonavich, Bobby Pappallardo, and Deputy Sheriff Dick Blunt. The rounds are signaled by “the sound of a sad lounge singer singing a song that no one would ever want to hear in a bar” or “a lurking man in a bird mask” and the grand prize is “a creepy sex doll in a bowl of milk.” Maybe Meyers is onto something, or maybe he’s just such a huge Game of Thrones fan that he has to throw shade while another HBO show is going through a down year to make his favorite series look better by comparison.

Matt Damon Has Questions About Aquaman in New Martian Clip

We’ve already gotten one pretty solid trailer for director Ridley Scott’s upcoming adaptation of Andy Weir’s The Martian. But as we await the next one, 20th Century Fox has dropped a little treat: this viral teaser showing how the Ares 3 crew handled their isolation training prior to the mission that strands astronaut Mark Watney (Matt Damon) on Mars. Watney, as he is in the book, is the coolest cucumber about his 10 days alone, saying he was able to tackle “some of the more important questions” while he was in there. For example? “How come Aquaman can control whales? I mean, whales are mammals. It doesn’t even make sense.”

Fair enough. We also find out that Michael Peña’s Rick Martinez worked on his onanism techniques (“left handed!” he whispers) and that astronaut Beth Johanssen (Kate Mara) probably has the best insights on everyone. “Watney is everybody’s favorite,” she says. “Martinez really thinks he’s funny. Lewis is pretty badass.” Oh yeah, their fearless leader, Commander Lewis (Jessica Chastain), is definitely tough. Just note her answer when asked if being the first woman to lead a Mars mission stresses her out.

“You know from my file that I graduated top of my class from the Naval Academy,” she says. “Have you ever been in a submarine? You try to sleep but with the creaks and the grinding, it sounds like somebody is slowly and violently crushing a soda can that you’re inside of. I slept like a baby from Day 1. So no, I don’t think the added pressure from being the first woman to command a mission to Mars is going to be too intense.”

GravityFalls GIF and a Graf: Board Game Bonding

Disney XD

From the moment Stanford “Ford” Pines walked through a portal from another dimension on Gravity Falls, it was clear Dipper would be fascinated by his new relative. So when the painfully awkward and anxious kid finds out his “Gruncle Ford” is a fellow obsessive of “Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons” it’s his chance to connect to his family and the man he wants to know so much more about. Yet when they begin playing in the TV room they prevent Dipper’s sister Mabel, uncle Stan, and Mabel’s friend Grenda from watching the finale of Duck-Tective, leading to a conflict when Ford introduces the MacGuffin of the infinity-sided die. It’s predictable, but it’s also a necessary battle to hash out. Stan and Mabel face off against the warlock brought to life from the game (voiced by Weird Al Yankovic), and in defending Ford and Dipper they learn to appreciate each other’s differences. And more importantly, Ford opens up to Dipper, which portends further investigations into the mysteries of alternate dimensions and paranormal activity in the future.

Rareware and Microsoft Studios have partnered with iam8bit to press three of Rareware’s best soundtracks to vinyl. Banjo-Kazooie and Perfect Dark, two N64 classics, will have their soundtracks pressed for the first time, in gorgeous color vinyl double-LP sets with custom art. Battletoads gets an alternate edition after this year’s San Diego Comic Con got an exclusive gatefold variant. This release has another custom gatefold designed by Nick Gazin, best known for his impeccable work on both now-iconic Run The Jewels album covers.

All of these records are limited to 3,000 copies, and will be up for pre-order at 10AM PST today. iam8bit also commissioned a special hand-pulled screen print commemorating 30 years of Rareware by DKNG that’ll be available as well. If Mondo’s recent vinyl soundtrack release for The Last Of Usis any indication, these will sell out in a flash as the video game and vinyl collector markets converge. After wearing out the soundtrack CD for Banjo-Kazooie that came with a Nintendo Power renewal nearly 15 years ago, we’re thrilled to see these, but fair warning: if anyone ever gets around to putting out the Jet Force Geminisoundtrack on split black-and-blue vinyl, look out for elbows like it’s midnight on Black Friday.

Hannibal GIF and a Graf: All Unhappy Families

What have we always said is the most important thing? Family. That’s the theme of “And the Woman Clothed with the Sun…” which contrasts several different families from Hannibal’s world of characters. Will’s new surrogate family, his wife and stepson, are an attempt to quell the thoughts and emotions Hannibal stirred up within him. From the moment Will sets foot in the Baltimore State Hospital, he’s tempting fate in order to track down a serial killer who targets families. Being around Hannibal’s mind helps him achieve his potential as a psychoanalyst, but he also risks relapsing into the instability that inspired his most violent thoughts and actions. Tellingly, the first scene between them is set in reality, in the hospital, pristine and without fantasy. But once Hannibal looks over the Dolarhyde file, the conversations shift to his mind palace, where he sees the Wendigo reflected back at him in a mirror shard. Their connection is so strong—Freddie Lounds called them “murder husbands” when they traipsed across Europe—that it triggers the hallucinatory sequences that have already begun to affect Will’s fragile balance. In flashbacks, Hannibal’s relationship with Abigail Hobbes provides context for how Lecter treats the people he considers family. It’s a highly manipulative relationship based on paternal influence: Hannibal controls her actions right up until the point he kills her just like her father intended. And considering that Hannibal not only sees what Alana Bloom and Jack Crawford are doing in an attempt to control his interactions with Will, but has already begun to subvert them by getting in contact with Francis Dolarhyde, it’s apparent that he has another violent display of family affection in mind.

A New Deadpool Teaser Gives Us Mirth Before the Merc

Deadpool faithful, thy time draws near. Weeks after what might have been Comic Con’s most talked-about footage—and talked-about bootleg—it seems that we’re a mere day away from getting a look Fox’s next Marvel joint (we know, we get confused too). The pre-trailer teaser might not be a marketing phenomenon we love, but we’d be lying if we said we didn’t enjoy an amuse-bouche before the big chimichanga. Come for the Ryan Reynolds, stay for the hyper-pompous voiceover and rich mahogany!

The Angry Comedians on Hulu Trailer: DifficultPeople

If you like Billy On The Street, the show where comedian Billy Eichner yells at passers by on the streets of New York, sometimes with celebrities, you’re likely the target audience for Hulu’s new original series, Difficult People. Eichner is joined by fellow comedian Julie Klausner; both are in full misanthrope mode, which basically means playing less-famous versions of themselves (which are, perhaps, genuine reflections of their pre-fame selves). Klausner and Eichner are very funny, which is a good start to any buddy sitcom, but the cavalcade of guest stars in the trailer alone is encouraging. Seeing Fred Armisen, Kate McKinnon, Seth Meyers, Martin Short, Andy Cohen, Ana Gasteyer and Amy Sedaris (not to mention Debbie Harry) in a single minute is kind of like being showered with comedy confetti—and you never want it to stop raining.

Pause At: :46. We are expecting lots of this. Magician Kate McKinnon at :50. Oh, wow, those eyebrows at :57.Essential Quote: “You know who you look like? A really beaten up young Shari Lewis.” Martin Short

Brie Larson Breaks Out In The Heart-Crushing Trailer for Room

Let this be the one. Let this finally be the movie that puts Brie Larson on the map as an actress who gets to demand big salary numbers for the consistent, fantastic work she does. You’ve loved her in United States of Tara and Scott Pilgrim vs. The World and 21 Jump Street and everywhere else her supporting work has lifted up the cast around her. You also loved her in 2013’s Short Term 12, where she finally got the chance to show her range with a powerful leading performance. But now it looks like the magic spell could finally be cast, with a role that has the emotional weight of Short Term and the source material to capture a wider audience. Emma Donaghue’s book of the same name was a major hit when it came out in 2010, and this first trailer is completely haunting. Larson plays “Ma,” a woman who’s been trapped in a one-room shed for a very long time with her 5-year-old son, Jack. Jack has no memories or impressions of the outside world, and Ma will do whatever it takes to ensure his freedom. Let this be the Oscar nomination that Larson didn’t get for Short Term a few years ago. She’s going to break our hearts, and her co-stars William H. Macy and Joan Allen won’t do much to piece them back together.

Step Out in These Intergalactic StarWars Sneakers

Adidas

Remember when the first Star Wars movies came out and you could buy Luke lunchboxes and Chewie underwear and Obi-Wan sweatshirts and Vader backpacks? And then everywhere you went, you knew you were the coolest because you had pictures of your favorite characters all over you? No? OK, maybe I’m older than you. But trust me, it was amazing. Now that two or three decades have passed and we’re all grown-ass men and women, it’s harder to wear Star Wars and be taken seriously.

But you can take these things seriously: classic Adidas casual sneakers, all done up in Star Wars livery. Every mi star wars shoe is customizable—you start with a base-model Adidas casual sneaker, then pick the bunting you want using Adidas’s customizer web-app. Choose from different colors, lace charms, Star Wars fabric graphics, and metallic treatments to the toe shell and the leather stripes. I hereby challenge you to come up with something more downright awesome than my camo Stormtrooper Superstar 80s seen above.

The German athletic brand has a history of making shoes and clothing with Star Wars characters on them (check out this Stormtrooper sweatshirt), but with the holiday arrival of the Star Wars film reboot, this 2015 gear line carries more weight.

New Ghostbusters with Dudes Reportedly Still in the Works

Sony Pictures

Now that, according to director Paul Feig’s very-active Twitter feed, the all-female Ghostbusters movie is in full swing, attention has now shifted back to whether the rumored Ghostbusters-with-men will be happening as well. Apparently, yes. (Score one for the dudes!) Speaking with MTV News at the New York premiere of Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation, screenwriter Drew Pearce said the movie is in the works, although it’s very early on. Pearce just recently finished his work on the script and told MTV that “there’s a gigantic bold idea” in there that brothers Anthony and Joe Russo (Captain America: The Winter Soldier) are going to work with Ivan Reitman to flesh out. Pearce also noted his version of events would tie in with other Ghostbusters of the past and future. But who will be donning the proton packs in his dream world? Chris Pratt and Channing Tatum have been mentioned in regards to the movie before and Pearce told MTV that is the “cast we’ve been thinking about” even though no one is locked in yet. “Whether that happens or not is very much above my pay grade,” Pearce said. “It’s just my job to give them something exciting that maybe they’ll do.” Exciting indeed.

TheOnion’s New Vice Parody Kidney Punches You With News

Attention, lovers of Vice and those who seek to be waterboarded by news! The Onion is coming at you with a disruptive docu-vertical of its own, and it’s called Edge.

The series, which premiers online Aug. 3, has a simple mission statement: “With a team of more than 300 news warriors, Edge pummels readers with immersive reporting that is uncaged, unaccountable, and totally fucked up.” In other words, it’s like Vice, but, you know, Edge-ier. And thank the Lord Edge is here to double-down on our regular kidney punches of current events. We weren’t quite urinating blood yet, so this should do the trick.

The teaser for the series gives us a glimpse of those “300 news warriors” fanned out all across the globe to find out what drugs oppressed people are doing. And two of those correspondents, Nic Moss and Chase Vaughn, are already set up on Twitter.

It’s difficult to say whether or not Edge can sustain its schtick over the long haul. The Onion has previously launched ventures like Onion SportsDome on Comedy Central and The Onion News Network on IFC that failed to gain traction and were canceled early in their runs. However, this is a web show, which lets it be a little more bitsy and a lot more shareable, which sounds like a better space for the content than an actual TV network. But regardless of if/how it ends, we’re sure excited to see how it starts!

New Key&Peele Sketch Will Make You Preemptively Miss This Show

Key & Peele frequently reveals a sketch a few days before an upcoming episode. But this week’s preview isn’t just hilarious, it’s an intriguing blend of social commentary and education advocacy.

Instead of creating an indelible character, “TeachingCenter” asks: What if good teaching was so highly valued that it created a fervent following like professional sports, complete with blockbuster trades, astronomical contract deals, and a high school teacher draft at Radio City Music Hall—all covered by the education version of SportsCenter? It has an Ohio teacher taking her talents back to New York City for a lucrative new contract that includes test performance incentives, a Highlight of the Day of a history teacher bringing an engaged introvert into a discussion, and a French teacher traded for a head librarian and two lunch ladies to be named later. There’s even a ticker along the bottom of the highlights giving information on test score matches like the NCAA basketball tournament, complete with inside references to other K&P sketches.

This isn’t the first time the show has come up with sketches about education. The infamous “Substitute Teacher” featuring Keegan Michael Key as the cantankerous Mr. Garvey was outstanding, but it quickly devolved into diminishing returns with subsequent appearances and reversals. And the draft scene, which posits that a teacher with a “humble professional football player” for a father is now a sudden millionaire, has shades of the classic Chappelle’s Show “Racial Draft” sketch. We got word this week that the fifth season will be the final one for Key & Peele, and there wasn’t a lot of mourning—because the assumption is that Key and Jordan Peele will go on to do more great things apart and together. But this sketch proves they’ll still deliver quite a few LOLs before their run is over.

This Simpsons–Wire Mashup is the Opening Sequence of Our Dreams

In the great Internet sport known as Ranking Every Season of a Given Show In Order to Prove Your Worth as a Human, third seasons don’t tend to get a lot of love. But while neither The Simpsons nor The Wire count S3 among their best, it turns out that they go together just about perfectly (especially the episode “Homer at the Bat”). Or so one enterprising fan discovered with this mashup that re-cuts Simpsons moments into a new Wire-style opening sequence—complete with a font that David Simon would love, Bohemian Typewriter. If you need us, we’ll be holding our breath for a Season 4 version that casts Jimbo Jones as Namond and Milhouse as Dukie.

Vice Goes No-Holds-Barred with New Women-Focused Web Channel

Vice is launching an online presence devoted entirely to women. The Hollywood Reporter broke the news back in February and now the “network,” called Broadly, has its first trailer. In true Vice fashion, Broadly looks like it’s going to go there. In this extended teaser we see abortion medication being delivered via drone into Poland, a coven of witches in Brooklyn, a female biker gang called “The Caramel Curves,” a report on the death of lesbians bars across America, Ann Coulter shooting guns and defending her argument that women should not have the right to vote, a field report from a Kenyan village exclusively populated by women, and lots more. The channel, which is presided over by editor in chief Tracie Egan Morrissey, will feature recurring series such as A Day in the Life, Style and Error (which promises to get “super deep with the superficial”), and How (Blank) Found Feminism. This is the 11th vertical launched by Vice, and seems to show that the company is serious about expanding its reach. And, hey, Mary H.K. Choi talking to Rose McGowan candidly about women in Hollywood? We’ll take it.

MastersofSex GIF and a Graf: Freud Is Dead

Showtime

Although it does pick up a bit of the Virginia-balances-life-and-work thread from its previous installment, last night’s Masters of Sex largely focused on the, well, response that Human Sexual Response is getting. Religious folks condemn it. High school students enjoy it. Makers of perfumes, “hand massagers,” and Playboy want to harness its power. And people who actually study the science of sex love it. While reading the many reactions in various journals, Virginia Johnson (Lizzy Caplan) comes across this wonderful passage: “I can confidently say that even if god is not dead, Dr. Freud certainly is.” Virginia responds by saying, “We killed Freud.” The ever-arrogant Bill Masters (Michael Sheen) simply notes, “But we knew that years ago.” Freud’s work didn’t die—and despite the efforts of Showtime, it’s likely he’s still more familiar to people than Masters and Johnson—but it’s nice to see them give him a run for his money.

Scully Is (Almost) Ready for Something in New X-Files Teaser

OK, Fox. This is getting ridiculous. Understandably, a show about mystery like The X-Files should have a little bit of intrigue in its trailers but this one has, like, 50 percent of the same footage as the last one and the only other information is this non-telling exchange between Fox Mulder (David Duchovny) and Dana Scully (Gillian Anderson):

Celebrate Paul’sBoutique’s Birthday With a Streaming Sample Seminar

Capitol Records
Want to feel old? Other than the fact the two drinks now gives you a hangover and you don’t know the difference between trap and moombahton, we mean. Try this one: the Beastie Boys’ Paul’s Boutique turns 26 tomorrow. And while we know the trio’s sophomore album as their first step away from label-encouraged frat rap and toward the experimentation that marked the rest of their careers, it’s truly celebrated for the Dust Brothers’ sample-choked production. Hundreds of sample went into the making of the album; most of them have by now been chronicled on various websites and reconstruction projects. Today, though, Seattle radio station KEXP is devoting the entire day to the album—from sample tracks to interviews to the album tracks themselves. (As we were writing this paragraph, the stream went from Pato Banton’s “Don’t Sniff Coke” to the Beatles’ “Back in the USSR” to BDP’s “My Philosophy.”) The stream is below, or head over to KEXP’s live player to tune in—and maybe even shake your rump. (Gettin’ rope, y’all!)

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A lot has changed following X-Men: Days of Future Past. Since director Bryan Singer’s last mutant flick he’s added new members to his cinematic X-team like Nightcrawler (Kodi Smit-McPhee) and Jubilee (Lana Condor). He’s also recast some more familiar heroes like Storm (now played by Alexandra Shipp) and Jean Grey (now played by Game of Thrones’ Sophie Turner). But new faces notwithstanding, the big reboot for Singer’s next movie, X-Men: Apocalypse, is its shift to the 1980s. This time around not only are the X-Men dealing with the arrival of super-old mutant Apocalypse (Oscar Isaac), they’re also dealing with some really killer fashion and hair choices. See what we mean in the newly released images above.

SpaceJam2 with LeBron James Might Still Happen

Warner Bros.

Today, Warner Bros. and Spring Hill Entertainment, the production company NBA superstar LeBron James co-founded with Maverick Carter, announced a partnership. That in and of itself is not headline news, especially when you consider the general praise for James’ performance in Amy Schumer’s Trainwreck. But connect that to the fact that Warners apparently re-registered the trademarks for Space Jam and suddenly crazed ’90s kids everywhere are starting to speculate about a potential sequel the the Michael Jordan/Looney Tunes flick all over again.

It’s important to point out here that the most significant production James’ Spring Hill Entertainment has been involved in so far is The LeBrons, an animated version of his Nike ad where four different versions of James interact in Akron, Ohio with featured corporate logo “cameos.”

Space Jam is a hot, nostalgic pile of corporate synergy garbage, and there’s no reason to think a sequel from the production company that packed The LeBrons full of logo cameos will be anything different. But that doesn’t mean it won’t happen, because there will be lines of young professionals around the block in Tune Squad throwback jerseys.

Our First Look at Empire’s New Season Is Pretty Much Haircuts

Here’s what we don’t get from the new teaser that FOX just released:
• a look at Marisa Tomei, who was cast in Season 2
• any of the many, many guest appearances happening this season (Chris Rock, Alicia Keys, Lenny Kravitz, etc.)
• dialogue

Here’s what we do get:
• a much-needed shape-up for Lucious Lyon
• an even-more-needed grown-man haircut for Jamal
• yet another ridiculous stencil pattern for Hakeem
• Cookie holding a mic and standing in a stunt jail cell at a “Free Lucious” concert
• An earworm that sounds like it could be the “Drip Drop” of the new season, but also functions as…
• …a not-at-all-subliminal subliminal being fired at the Starz series Power (the two have had plenty of back-and-forth already)

James Corden and Paula Abdul Revived the ‘Opposites Attract’ Video

James Corden. James Corden! The Jimmys might get the earlier time slots in late-night TV, but Seth Meyers and James Corden are our chat show A-Team. Meyers gives us the genial, old-friends style conversation we want and Corden brings the requisite silly-without-being-completely-nice-washed for a vanilla audience. And so here he is, at his best, lip-syncing and dancing with Paula Adbul. We don’t even miss MC Skat Kat with him in that suit!

Sports TV Got A Little Better Today, Basketball Fans

HBO
After years of incremental progress, there finally seems to be some real momentum behind a la carte television—and somehow, the NBA is shaping up to be a leader in the field. Today the league set the prices for its previously announced changes to the League Pass television package. Full access to all games is still $199.99, but now out-of-market fans can watch their favorite team’s games on streaming devices for $119.99. Further, fans will be able to purchase access to single games for $6.99. While the league is currently negotiating with carriers to make the team and single game options available over TV, as of now the a la carte options are only available online.

And if that wasn’t enough news for NBA fans, there’s also the revelation that Bill Simmons, fresh off his acrimonious separation from ESPN in May, signed a deal with HBO for a weekly talk show to begin in 2016. This feels a little bit like Jonny Damon leaving the Red Sox to sign with the Yankees in 2005: hopping from an idiosyncratic but well-funded organization to the gleaming jewel of the field. HBO already has two successful models for humorous commentary shows in Last Week Tonight and Real Time With Bill Maher; landing somewhere between those two shows, with a dose of Bryant Gumbel’s Real Sports, seems like a natural move for Simmons. He’s also slated to produce podcasts and consult with HBO Sports to develop documentaries along the lines of ESPN’s award-winning (and reputation saving) 30 For 30 series. It’s a soft landing after a brief period of uncertainty, but it ensures that starting next year, viewers will still be able to find out all about Simmons and his buddies making ridiculous prop bets during trips to Vegas. Phew.

Old Friends Barack Obama and Jon Stewart Say a Long Goodbye

For the last time on Comedy Central, here is Jon Stewart chatting with President Barack Obama on The Daily Show. Listen to them talk for 20 minutes about veteran’s affairs, the appropriate reach of government, the IRS, health care reform, and more.

Related Galleries

In the wee hours of the morning the new full-length trailer for Bond 24, aka Spectre, hit the web and promptly melted all of our brains with its sheer beauty and intrigue. In addition to the trailer, the Internet has also now been gifted with some new images from the film. Pour yourself a mid-day martini and check them out above.

This is Why You Don’t Make a Movie About Emoji

Today, after a three-studio bidding war, Sony Pictures Animation bought a pitch for a movie about emoji. Yes, a movie about emoji—because after Smurfs begat Teletubbies and Teletubbies begat Minions, the only dumbing-down left to do involves no-copyright keyboard symbols. We figured the hazards would be evident to all parties involved, but allow us to make things perfectly clear.

Marvel Skipped Comic Con, But Guess What They’re Bringing to D23

Zade Rosenthal/Marvel
Walt Disney Studio’s D23 Expo comes to the Anaheim Convention Center on August 14 this year—and now that the event has begun teasing its lineup, we know we’ll get to see at least part of the reason Marvel opted out of its traditional Hall H panel at Comic Con almost exactly a month prior. Judging from details Disney released today, one of the highlights of the weekend will be Saturday’s “Worlds, Galaxies and Universes: Live Action at The Walt Disney Studios.”

During the presentation, Disney Studios chairman Alan Horn will lead a walkthrough of upcoming projects like Alice Through the Looking Glass, The Jungle Book, Captain America: Civil War and Star Wars: The Force Awakens with what WDS is coyly calling “a bevy of special guests.” We’re not sure how many constitutes a full bevy, but if Lucasfilm was willing to put on a free concert and fireworks show at Comic Con International, we can only imagine what they might roll out on their own home turf. Everyone gets a Storm Trooper of their very own!

The panel comes one day after the other promising session, “Pixar and Walt Disney Animation Studios: The Upcoming Films, Hosted by John Lasseter.” We’ve been promised there’ll be footage of Pixar’s next two ventures, The Good Dinosaur and Finding Dory, as well as from the Disney Animation’s upcoming pair, Zootopia and Moana. Other events include retrospectives on Aladdin and Toy Story and a presentation about the history of Disney’s animated shorts, but the real heat will clearly be what we didn’t get in San Diego a couple of weeks ago. The Force—and the anticipation—will be strong with this one.

This Video Lunch Date With Stephen Colbert Gets a Bit Odd

It’s lunch time (sorta), and as of this week that means Stephen Colbert wants to eat with you! He also wants to let you know that a bunch of thugs will be hunting you down to beat on your spine with a fence post until you tell them where you’re keeping their money. Wait, what?! Eh, just go with it.

Here’s the Full Pitch Video for ABC’s New Muppets Series

Instead of shooting a traditional pilot, the new Muppets series’ creators Bill Prady, Bob Kushell, and Randall Einhorn filmed a 10-minute mockumentary-style pitch for ABC executives to show the bigwigs what their new series was all about. The full video screened at Comic-Con International, and it got such an enthusiastic reception that the network decided to put the whole thing up on YouTube ahead of its Sept. 22 debut. The actual series is set behind the scenes of a post-Jimmy Kimmel Live! talk show hosted by Miss Piggy—but the pitch sees Kermit heading to the set of a Civil War drama co-starring Topher Grace to convince the diva pig to return to the fold so the whole gang can move ahead with production. Check it out above.

Here Is Your WIRED StarWars Challenge for Day 79

Lucasfilm

For the seemingly interminable wait until Star Wars: The Force Awakens hits theaters, we’re helping pass time by giving you daily challenges related to everyone’s favorite universe. When you complete a task, send us a tweet @WIRED or tag us on Facebook. Got a picture of yourself in action? Post it on Instagram and put @WIRED in the description. Also, make sure to hashtag everything #WIREDStarWarsChallenge. We’ll give shout-outs to the most worthy challengers out there, so prepare for Internet glory!*

July 21, 2015: Day 79/150 days left
Time for another history lesson! This time, settle in with the history of Qui-Gon Ginn. He was the Padawan to Count Dooku and the mentor to Obi-Wan and Anakin. That’s a hefty resume! Let us honor his memory with a group reading among friends.

*ANY SUBMISSIONS, PHOTOS, VIDEOS, OR OTHER MATERIAL YOU SHARE MAY BE PUBLISHED ON WIRED.COM OR WIRED’S SOCIAL MEDIA FEEDS, AND MAY BE CROPPED OR EDITED.

HaltAndCatchFire GIF and a Graf: Copy Protection

Showtime

The signs are all there that something is amiss with the calm in the wake of Westgroup’s failed acquisition of Mutiny. After Skylar Astin—playing the smarmy backstabber his face suggests he was born to play—swoops to replace Joe (Lee Pace) at Westgroup, the oil company’s goals become painfully clear. Instead of acquiring Mutiny, Westgroup’s owner (and Joe’s father-in-law) simply hired a guy to reverse-engineer the whole thing, usurp the entire user base, and cut Mutiny’s legs out from under it. And in lieu of $5 million, they get nothing but legal red tape. Joe rushes to the Mutiny house in order to plead ignorance to Cameron (Mackenzie Davis) and Donna (Kerry Bishé)—and he’s not lying. But this very act, reverse-engineering a proprietary and industry-altering invention, is what the series was founded on back in the pilot. Joe and Gordon (Scoot McNairy) built an IBM PC, so Joe’s claims that he “wouldn’t do this” fall on deaf ears. Now the shoe is on the other foot, and if the final shot can be taken at face value, Cameron has to engineer one last desperate move in order to hold onto what she now realizes is so special.

MastersofSex GIF and a Graf: Three’s a Crowd

Showtime

Last night’s Masters of Sex was all about Virginia (Lizzy Caplan). Or rather, it was about Virgina’s womb. Which means it was really about Bill (Michael Sheen). That’s because even though Bill is, medically speaking, one of the most forward-thinking men when it comes to women’s sexual liberation, when it comes to Virginia and their “work” together, he often chooses to make what she does with her body his business. So Virginia is pregnant with her ex-husband’s child and Bill thinks she should take a leave of absence so that her pregnancy doesn’t distract from the promotion of their book Human Sexual Response. She almost has an abortion, but decides to keep her baby, leading to her delivery room breakdown about putting work before her children. Bill’s response to that is also about him getting what he wants (read: Virginia and her work), but also pretty dead on: “What if you show this baby that you were willing to pursue your passion? That you chose it, not over him, but for him? So that every night you could bring him a piece of the world?” She may not heed that advice, but it’s good she heard it.

The New Documentary Trailer: CallMeLucky

Here’s a surprising mix for you: Director Bobcat Goldthwait tells the story of comedian Barry Crimmins who used his popularity—and the Internet—to advocate for victims child abuse. It’s got interviews from big names like Marc Maron, David Cross, Patton Oswalt, Tom Kenny, Steven Wright, and Margaret Cho all speaking on the influence and power of Crimmins’ comedic approach.Pause at: 1:45 for Crimmins in front of the US Senate Judiciary Committee.Essential Quote: “He’s just this combination of Noam Chomsky and Bludo.”

This Week in Trailers: Jennifer Lawrence Has a Shotgun

We weren’t sure what would be on the slate after the major haul of Comic-Con trailers that came out last week, but then a whole other collection of clips exploded out of the Internet, including the latest from David O. Russell and Alejandro González Iñárritu. Fantastic! But that’s just the start. We’ve also got the latest joint venture from Amy Poehler and Tiny Fey, a few fright fests and some indie character studies. It’s a glass case of emotions. So jump right in!

The Lawrence and Russell (aka Oscar Bait) Trailer: Joy (Above)

Considering the star power of Jennifer Lawrence and the success she’s had under the direction of David O. Russell, the plot of their next collabo almost sounds like a satire: The life and rise to power of the inventor of a mop. They know they can sell water to wells at this point, so why not?! But of course the plot of Joy, based on the real life of Miracle Mop inventor and self-made billionaire Joy Mangano, looks much richer than its dull elevator pitch, especially since it promises to take place partly within Joy’s “inner life and fierce imagination.” People have already started lobbing criticism at the movie for casting Lawrence to play a single mother in her mid-30s, but the movie follows the family across four generations worth of time and, come on, it’s Lawrence and Russell. This guy writes parts for his golden goose at this point, and we’re not about to ask him to mess with the chemistry—and Bradley Cooper is here, too! Joy enters theaters, and the Oscar race, this Christmas.Pause at: 0:39 and 1:03 for what we suspect are a few of those “inner-life” sequences mentioned earlier. Stop at 1:17 and 1:30 for Lawrence intensity!Song: The Rolling Stones, “You Can’t Always Get What You Want”Essential Quote: “[shotgun fire] My name’s Joy, by the way.”—Joy Mangano (Lawrence)

The Indie Thriller Trailer: QueenofEarth

Wow. With Peggy Olsen officially behind her, Elisabeth Moss continues to demonstrate—ever more intensely—that she is an actress willing to plumb strange depths to build a character. Queen of Earth presents her as Catherine, a woman having a really hard time after the death of her father and subsequent dumping by her boyfriend. To get some R&R, Catherine retreats to a vacation house with her best friend, but when a local love interest starts to disrupt her peaceful getaway, Catherine starts spiraling into a very dark place. One of Moss’ greatest strengths as a performer is her ability to switch fully between a character that is quietly and tightly controlled into one that is being ripped apart from the inside out. It’s an impressive bi-polar swing, and this role seems engineered to put that talent on full display.Pause at: 0:38 for the craziest eyes!Essential Quote: “How dare you, you unrepentant piece of shit.”—Catherine (Moss)

The New Actually Scary Trailer: Boy

Anyone out there really unsettled by creepy kids in movies? Then turn away now, because Boy looks like an even more disturbing take on The Good Son. Little Ted Henley (Jared Breeze) has basically been left to raise himself at the crumbling motel run by his drunk and despondent single father (David Morse). The extra problem with this is that Ted has a darkness in him that goes way beyond the justifiable abandonment issues, and when a new tenant shows up (played by Rainn Wilson), Ted is nudged into his “final, unnerving metamorphosis,” which isn’t anything you want to hear about a nine-year-old “sociopath” in an isolation horror movie. The movie debuted at SXSW, and now it’s coming to scare you in your very own homes.Pause at: 0:32 for a weathered Rainn. Stop at 0:51 and 1:26 for creepy habits.Song: Cut One and Slow Wave, “Rise From The Flames”Essential Quote: “Leave the God damn customers alone!”—Ted’s father, John (Morse)

The New Scary Trailer: Sinister2

Sinister 2 looks like it’s going to commit the easiest sequel sin there is: Gluttony. It can be done well, but when it comes to sequels—and this is especially true in horror—the temptation to do more and show more and everything that made the original good is often their undoing. The first Sinister didn’t leave a whole lot to the imagination, but just enough was left out of view to hold you in suspense nearly the entire time. And it was terrifying! For round 2, though, it looks like Bughuul and his ghouls will be walking and talking up a storm in full view of the audience. Horror is a medium that survives entirely on the suspension of disbelief, and when you have too much time to process what you’re seeing it can make everything A) too ordinary by the end and B) susceptible to letting the seams show. But, hey, Shannyn Sossamon!Pause at: There are so many quick cuts here it’s a stop-all-the-time kind of trailer.Essential Quote: “There’s a problem. I found another house.”

The New Mumblecore Trailer: DiggingforFire

Writer/director Joe Swanberg has so many friends!Pause at: All over the place for bunches of Joe Swanberg’s many cool friends.Song: alt-J, “Left Hand Free”Essential Quote: “Being in love, is that getting what you want or giving somebody what they want?”—Sam Elliott’s character

The Funny Tina Fey/Amy Poehler Trailer: Sisters

As Tina Fey and Amy Poehler explained to us this week on The Tonight Show, they are spiritually obligated to make a movie together every seven years, lest they be turned into witches. What good news for us! A lot has happened for these titans of TV comedy since Baby Mama in 2008, but no matter what they always find their way back to each other. And this time, they’re a pair of sisters resolved to throw one final rager in their childhood home before their parents sell it off. The safe word for this pair is most definitely “Keep going.”Pause at: 1:38 for peak Tina and Amy. Stop at 1:40 and 1:48 for Maya Rudolph. Yes. Pause at 1:52 for whatever this is.Songs: Depeche Mode, “Just Can’t Get Enough” and David Guetta feat. Nicki Minaj, Bebe Rexha, and Afrojack, “Hey Mama”Essential Quote: “Will you not drink tonight so I can let my freak flag fly?”—Mara (Poehler)

Hannibal GIF and a Graf: The Doctor Surrenders to the FBI

NBC

Saturday’s “Digestivo” brings Bryan Fuller’s retelling of Thomas Harris’ Hannibal novel to a close, setting up the back half of the season as a six-episode adaptation of Red Dragon, and finding an ingenious way to use the mythology of the character without ever needing Clarice Starling. And once again, it all comes down to the bond between Will (Hugh Dancy) and Hannibal (Mads Mikkelsen). The doctor saves Will from having his face cut off, but Will isn’t all that grateful, saying in no uncertain terms that he no longer cares for Hannibal the same way, and wants him gone. “I’m not going to find you,” he says. “I’m not going to look for you. I don’t want to know where you are or what you do. I don’t want to think about you anymore.” But that sets up an ingenious twist to the capture of Hannibal Lecter. Jack (Laurence Fishburne) doesn’t catch Hannibal—he gives himself up. And he does that specifically because Will rejects him, doesn’t want to know where he is or think about him at all. By surrendering to the FBI, Hannibal ensures that no matter Will goes, no matter what he does from here, he will always know exactly where to find the doctor with whom he’s inextricably linked. That’ll sting for a while, but it will come in handy once Francis Dolarhyde (Richard Armitage) emerges and the events of Red Dragon are underway.

Exciting Netflix Trailer: Narcos

The first trailer for Narcos was just a whole bunch of cocaine, but this one gives us an actual story. In accordance with the name, Narcos chronicles the wild coke-lords-and-cops wars of the 1980s, with an emphasis on the King of Colombia himself, Pablo Escobar, and real-life DEA agents Steve Murphy (Boyd Holbrook) and Javier Peña (Pedro Pascal). We know it’s hard to keep up, but add this to your mounting Netflix original content queue.Pause at: 0:25 for young Pablo.Essential Quote: “My name is Pablo Emillo Escobar Gaviria. I make deals for a living. You decide: silver or lead?”—Pablo Escobar (Wagner Moura)

The Trailer You Wish Everyone Would Talk About: TheRevenant

Oh, sorry, what’s that you say about the Oscar race? This movie stars Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hardy and is directed and co-written by newly minted Academy Award winner Alejandro González Iñárritu. That’s right, DiCaprio intensity meets Birdman crazy. Revenant is based on the novel of the same name by Michael Punke, and tells the story of a fur trapper in the 19th century American wilderness who goes on a revenge tear after his associate (played by Hardy) robs him and leaves him do die after a bear attack. The wilderness, am I right? And here is some bonus material for you: The about-to-be-major Domhnall Gleeson and the up-and-coming Will Poulter will also star, and Iñárritu is rejoined by his Birdman cinematographer Emmanuel Lubezki. Because filming a movie like this with super grizzly actors like DiCaprio and Hardy wasn’t enough, the director and cameraman decided to raise the stakes visually by shooting only in natural light, regardless of how remote the locations were. Are we having fun yet??Pause at: 0:50 for Leo’s Oscar face. Stop at 1:36 for one big bear.Essential Quote: “I ain’t afraid to die anymore. I done it already.”—Hugh Glass (DiCaprio)

Paul Rudd Just Mac-Rolled Conan. Again

If Paul Rudd joining the Marvel Cinematic Universe means we’ll be treated to regular Rudd-bombing on the late-night TV circuit for the next, like, 10 years, then Ant-Man just became our new favorite super franchise (and having Evangeline Lilly on board doesn’t hurt either).

Mac and Me, tho… It’s a total classic! And despite the fact that this is (approximately) the 378th time Rudd has Mac-Rolled Conan, that careening mannequin-in-a-wheelchair scene is still funny.

SuicideSquad’s Enchantress Is Surprisingly Good at Beatboxing

So it looks like the hidden talent of your new Enchantress is mad beatboxing skills! If you follow anyone in her social media orbit, you know Suicide Squad’s Cara Delevingne (currently promoting next week’s Paper Towns) is clearly the life of any party, and in the second half of 2015 she is poised to show us that modeling is her least interesting talent—even though she’s really, really good at it.

Oh Hey, Here’s Some Footage From the New X-Files

Ever since it was announced back in March that X-Files would be returning for a six-episode run, we’ve been holding our breath. Will it reignite all of our conspiracy theory fires? Will the magic still be there? Will it give us more fodder for our fanfic? Now, we finally have a (very brief) glimpse of what the new X-Files will look like.

The clip above, which aired on Fox during Wayward Pines, doesn’t give away much—Mulder (David Duchovny) looks around a corner! Someone is dragging something! There’s an injection! Scully (Gillian Anderson) has a gun!—but it’s proof that this show is actually happening. That’s enough for us.

The new X-Files “event series” will begin airing Jan. 24, 2016. We want to believe this will be amazing.

Emmy Voters Love GameofThrones as Much as You Do

Helen Sloan/HBO

Game of Thrones just scored very big. The fantasy drama snagged 24 Emmy nominations this morning, beating out every other show in the bunch, and its network—HBO—lead all networks with 126 nominations total. Not bad for a show that weathered its share of controversy in its fifth season.

But while Game of Thrones walked away with the most nominations, the more impressive showing was that of Netflix, which stepped up with 32 nods total. The streaming service got noms for Orange Is the New Black and House Of Cards for Outstanding Drama Series, Kyle Chandler and Kevin Spacey for Best Actor in a drama, and Ben Mendelssohn and Uzo Aduba in the supporting categories. That’s ahead of other cable networks like AMC and Showtime, which each scored 24 nominations, and just behind FX at 38. After only a few years of original programming, Netflix has established itself as a major player in the high-profile categories.

• Empire got a Best Lead Actress nomination for Taraji P. Henson’s undeniable Cookie Lyons—but that’s it for the most popular broadcast program that isn’t a live sporting event. The monstrously popular Walking Dead is also absent.

• Tatiana Maslany finally got her nomination for Lead Actress, Drama for Orphan Black. (!!!) Here’s hoping that if she wins, she gets a trophy for each of the characters she plays. Although considering she’s up against Henson for Empire, perhaps it would be better to see Helena and Cookie face off against each other for the statuette.

• Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt earned seven Emmy nominations as the breakout debut comedy for voters, which has to sting for NBC. But Parks and Recreation did get an Outstanding Comedy Series nod and Amy Poehler scored her fifth consecutive nomination for Lead Actress, Comedy.

• The CW, which picked up its first ever Golden Globe this year for Gina Rodriguez’s performance on Jane The Virgin, hasn’’t seen its uptick in quality rewarded in Emmy nominations. But it did rightfully get one nod—for Best Narrator.

• Louis CK is still widely beloved by voters as a writer, director, and a performer. He earned five nominations for his work this year on Louie, hosting Saturday Night Live, and his special Live at the Comedy Store.

• For those who love cruel trivia tidbits, the final season of Disney Channel’s Dog with a Blog received a nomination for Outstanding Children’s Program for the second year in a row. That brings its Emmy total to three, or for anyone counting at home, one more nomination than David Simon’s The Wire. Maybe that fifth season at the Baltimore Sun should’ve cast an up-and-coming canine blogger.

Related Galleries

Last weekend at Comic-Con International fans got a look at a nerdgasm-inducing new teaser for the upcoming Deadpool movie starring Ryan Reynolds. We’re not going to show the leaked version of that trailer here for obvious reasons (Reynolds says it’s coming soon, promise), but here’s something to tide you over: seven beautiful high-resolution images from the film. Grab a chimichanga and enjoy the Merc with a Mouth above.

Listen to a Sample of the Arcade-Ready Pixels Score

courtesy Columbia Pictures

Pixels composer Henry Jackman has created scores for Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Big Hero 6, Captain Phillips, Wreck-It Ralph, and the upcoming Captain America: Civil War. His work runs the gamut from animated family comedy to blockbuster action to heart-pounding drama. The soundtrack for Pixels has callouts to all those genres, suggesting big set pieces while also blending in chiptune elements. We’ve got an exclusive sample of five selections from the soundtrack album, out July 24, below. Hey, anything with a bonus track titled “Arcaders ’82” is good in our book.

Neil deGrasse Tyson Tells Colbert He’d Prefer a Bigger Pluto

For the past few days we as a people have been crushing super hard on Pluto. As NASA’s New Horizons has been flying by the dwarf planet we’ve all looked on in awe at the small heavenly body with a big heart. But there’s one guy who isn’t so impressed: astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson. According to this interview he did with soon-to-be-host-of-The Late Show Stephen Colbert, the director of the Hayden Planetarium says that the little guy is great and all, but mostly Pluto is “awesome, minus 10 percent.” In short, he thinks the dwarf would be better if it was a much bigger place. (Size matters!) Colbert, a Pluto sympathizer, takes issue with this. “It looks like a planet,” he tells the famed scientist. “It’s got atmosphere; it even has a heart—unlike you, who will give it no love.” Watch their full exchange in the interview above.

We’re Not The Only Ones Looking For Answers on TrueDetective

True Detective has reached the midpoint of its second season without creating the same sort of indelible characters Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson delivered last year. (Aside from Colin Farrell, who is still irascibly hilarious.) The biggest mystery this season has nothing to do with a Yellow King, but with why the narrative is so impenetrable. Fans of the show aren’t taking the dive in quality very well, judging from this street flyer that Slate TV Critic Willa Paskin tweeted. We called the number, which is no longer in service (910 is a North Carolina area code), but the message is clear: People are not happy with the way things are going this season.

GravityFalls GIF and a Graf: This Better Suit My Fanfic

Disney

Hot damn, it’s great to hear that theme song again. After a three-month break—irregular episode scheduling has become Disney’s M.O. with this show—Gravity Falls is back to finally explain the mysterious reappearance of the other Stan Pines, the author of the cryptic books Dipper has been using to illuminate the paranormal around town. The lingering cliffhanger involved Dipper and Mabel’s Grunkle Stanley rescuing his brother Stanford (voiced by Oscar-winner J.K. Simmons!) from “some kind of sci-fi sideburn dimension” where he’s been trapped for decades. “A Tale of Two Stans” fills in the family backstory, but it has some sly commentary for anyone who may be disappointed with the way it unfolds. Like fans of Lost, True Detective, or Twin Peaks, Gravity Falls has an insanely active fan base speculating at all times about the plentiful mysteries hidden in the background or on final frames of an episode. But creator Alex Hirsch manages to cut disappointment off at the pass with Soos’ line about his fan-fiction. Coupled with a guest voice cast that includes Scrubs’ Ken Jenkins, Nick Offerman, and Breaking Bad’s Jonathan Banks, yesterday brought a self-aware and emotionally potent episode that portends big changes for the Pines twins through the end of their summer in Gravity Falls.

SuicideSquad’s Harley Quinn Is Kinda Un-Harley-Quinnish

Warner Bros.
The craziest part of the new trailer for Suicide Squad, leaked from San Diego Comic-Con and then released officially, is probably Margot Robbie’s version of Harley Quinn, the Joker’s sometime-girlfriend. In the trailer she’s…nutty. And that was true when cartoon writer Paul Dini and artist Bruce Timm invented her for Batman: The Animated Series in 1992. Harley went on to appear on comic books, and then get a serious revise—from criminal-in-love-and-wacky to more psycho and wearing way less clothing, in a universe-wide rewrite of continuity. Robbie’s version seems to hew more closely to the revised, less funny Harley—who maybe now is getting funnier again in comics. But not so much in movies? So what did her creator think of the new version? Well…here’s what might be a hint, courtesy of Dini’s twitter feed, retweeting another writer, Jimmy Palmiotti:

Twitter Says StarWars Wasn’t the Most Popular Thing at Comic-Con

If you were on Twitter at all over the last couple days chances are you saw something about Comic-Con International. From new teasers for films like Suicide Squad and Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice to pretty much everything that came out of Jennifer Lawrence’s mouth, there was a lot to tweet about. Overall, there were 2.9 million tweets about Comic-Con over the weekend and, surprisingly, they weren’t all about Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Actually, that movie came in third—after The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 2 and Batman v Superman—as the most tweeted-about film. Unsurprisingly, though, Lawrence was the most-discussed celebrity (take that, cast of Supernatural!). Check out a visualization of all of the Comic-Con talk on Twitter above and read Twitter’s full analysis here.

Here’s the SuicideSquad Trailer That Freaked Out Comic-Con

Grainy footage taken at the film’s panel at Comic-Con International already leaked over the weekend, but now Warner Bros. has officially released the Suicide Squad teaser that everyone freaked out about during the studio’s presentation in Hall H. Tracked to an ethereal cover of the Bee Gees “I Started a Joke,” the clip has all the familiar faces: Enchantress (Cara Delevingne) doing some spelunking, El Diablo (Jay Hernandez) playing with fire, Deadshot (Will Smith) using a makeshift heavy bag, a restrained Killer Croc (Adele Akinnuoye-Agbaje), and Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie) dangling from the bars of her cell. Oh, and a final tag of Jared Leto’s Joker preparing to torture somebody and flashing his shiny teeth. Watch it above so that you, too, may freak out over its existence.

Ack! After 25 Years, BloomCounty is Back

Berkeley Breathed/Facebook

If you’re of a certain age—too young for Doonesbury, too old for Rugrats—then chances are your first taste of satirical cartooning came from Bloom County. Berkeley Breathed’s comic strip had all the trappings of a conventional strip (kids and animals), but it also had a glorious subversive streak that skewered virtually everything about the 1980s, from Reagan-era policy to the Moral Majority. It’s also been gone for 25 years, having published its last installment in August 1989. So when Breathed published a photo on his Facebook page yesterday of himself drawing a new strip, people justifiably freaked out just a bit. Flightless waterfowl Opus was coming back? As it turned out, we didn’t have long(er) to wait: this morning Breathed shared the first strip of Bloom County 2015.

Berkeley Breathed/Facebook

It’s just a re-introduction, featuring Opus and wise-beyond-his-years Milo, but it’s enough to make us confident that Breathed hasn’t missed a step—he’s just been taking a Breatheder. Obviously, there’s no shortage of political buffoonery out there for him to skewer, so let’s all welcome the strip back with open arms, or at least uselessly flapping wings.