Monday, July 25, 2005

Ramblings about love and marriage

Sometimes I wonder what will happen to me 5 years down the road. In Singapore, it seems like the majority follows the life course. From 1-4, you grow up. From 5-6, you attend kindergarten. From 7-12, you’re waiting to sit for your PSLE. From 13-17, secondary education beckons. From 18 onwards, you go into some higher learning institution or start working. Subsequently you work/study until you hit you mid-20s. Then what?

Someone once told me that the best time to find a partner is when you are in your tertiary education because once you start your working life, you do not get the chance to mingle much with people romantically speaking. I have no idea how true that is and I think there is no point in finding someone now for that just-in-case scenario in the future. I don't know where this post is going but I was just thinking about how the society views a woman that has yet to marry by the time she hits the big 3-0 (or maybe 4-0 according to statistics nowadays). More interestingly, how would the woman feel? Would she do an Ally McBeal and try to get hitched? Would she be a romantic and wait for the right guy to come along?

Who is the right guy anyway? How do you know he’s the one? Do you JUST know? Would you someday be wondering whether he is indeed the true love? Is there true love? Another point is whether you have to get married if you found someone you truly love. What does marriage really mean anyway? That you are legally bounded by marital vows and then what? That the woman gets a slice of the man’s possession if the divorce judge says so? In that case, wouldn’t it be a legality that is only beneficial for the woman? And the man is really tightening the noose around his neck? I have a friend who said she would prefer to cohabit with someone she likes and rear a few dogs because kids are too noisy and there is no sense in getting married. And we always say we would be her bridesmaids first.

However, a sociology lecturer once revealed that local males become healthier after marriage. So getting hitched may not be that bad a noose after all.