Gooses! Geeses! My Golden Egg.

A very well made, inexpensive golden yellow egg is hard to come by. The Lucid Dream No. 5 is all of these things, not to mention that it's quiet and waterproof! Great for beginners and advanced users alike, I suggest this golden egg for those who want a nice warm up toy or who are sensitive to vibrations.

The Lucid Dream No. 5 can be used for clitoral stimulation, shallow vaginal stimulation, around the labia, on the nipples, or any other erogenous zones. I found it worked best for clitoral stimulation, as it kept popping out when I inserted it in my vaginal canal due to its large size.

This would be great for beginners, those who don't require pinpoint clitoral stimulation or those who don't need strong vibrations to get off. This is definitely NOT recommended for anal, as the bullet can become unattached to the wire and get lost. It's not a risk I would take. That said, it might be good for stimulating perineum or the external anal ring.

Because of the fairly long wire, this would be good in single/solo situations or couples situations. If you wanted, you could even wear this out!

The business end to this toy (the bullet) is covered in firm jelly, with gentle soft swirls, kind of like ice cream. The swirls weren't really felt during my play. The jelly used is not forgiving at all, as the bullet makes for a very solid core. Once wet, the bullet is very difficult to hold on to. It's not very ergonomic while it's dry, so it's just going to worsen as it gets wet. There is a slight smell that tends to linger, but it's only evident when you hold it right against your nose. I'm not sure why you would want to taste it, but it does have a slight taste.

The wire is smooth and slick, and the control pack is velvety, smooth plastic. It has no gripes, but because of the velvet-ness, it doesn't get ridiculously slippery.

Jelly is, unfortunately, somewhat porous; so it needs to be properly cleaned and stored. More on this later. It doesn't pick up lint, hooray!

This isn't so much a bullet as it is an egg. It's very large for a bullet-type vibrator at 2.5" long and 5" in circumference (1.5" in diameter). The egg part is really heavy, like, surprisingly so. I would say that 90% of the weight of the toy (without batteries) is in the egg. The cord is 30" long, which I felt to be sufficient.

I think that this size and shape would be suitable for beginners and advanced users alike. I believe that advanced users would be able to get more use out of the larger size with shallow vaginal insertion, but that beginners would still be able to enjoy it clitorally.

It's vaguely egg-shaped, though without taper at the bottom. It's a gorgeous pale yellow color, about the color of lemonade--there needs to be more yellows in the sex toy market! The Lucid Dream No. 5 is not discreet and probably not do well in an air-travel situation having to go through security as it is so large and dense.

The Lucid Dream No. 5 features very simple up and down arrows with red LED indicators on the control pack. As far as functions go, it has 4 levels of constant vibration; there are no patterns or anything fancy. This was fine by me as I don't really seem to enjoy patterns. The vibrations vary from a flutter to a decent hum; they were kind of weak in practice and I don't have a clit'o'steel. I think this is because of the jelly surrounding the bullet, which disperses the vibrations and weakens them. The vibration is most powerful around the "crown" and the tip of the egg. There is no pinpoint stimulation, unfortunately, and as I said, the vibrations are rather dispersed. I would expect 2 AA batteries to put out much higher, more effective vibrations. My Dream Massager G used the same amount of batteries and could get me off without breaking a sweat.

The vibrations cannot be heard at arm's length or under blankets. It lives up to its claims regarding noise! Another promise, waterproofness, was also satisfactory. The bullet will do fine submerged, but I don't feel confident in the control pack. There is only a small, flexible O-ring, which will hold up just fine against being splash-proof and for shallow submerging, but I probably wouldn't keep it under water for an entire bath. Make sure the lid is on extra, extra tight when going in the water.

Because the Lucid Dreams No. 5 is made of jelly, it requires some special care. You can wash it with warm water (not hot) and gentle soap (nothing harsh, in fear of ruining the toy) or you can spritz it with toy cleaner. Unfortunately, it cannot be sterilized. My only issue in cleaning the toy is the ridges created by the swirls are rather difficult to completely clean. I just run my fingernail in the ridges during washing.

I would keep it separate from other toys as it may stick to them and make them melt or ruin them in another way. If storing it for longer than 24 hours, I suggest taking the batteries out to make them and the toy last longer.

You can use water-based and silicone-based lubes with this. If you're going to share it, use a condom.

The toy came packaged in a clear, plastic box with molded tray. Though there were no naked women, it's not really discreet in that it features the name of the toy, the toy itself, and the word "vibrator." It comes with a few claims: a "surreal" feeling, that the toy is waterproof, and that it's virtually silent. I'm not convinced of the surreality of it, but it is waterproof and very quiet. A product blurb is on the back and there are no instructions.

Overall, I would call the packaging attractive but not exceptional. I had some issues getting the clear, plastic molded tray out of the package due to the jelly material sticking and not sliding against the package. If this happens to you, simply push the egg back into its little slot and it should come out. Because of the jelly sticking to the plastic, I do not suggest keeping the package for storage.

I really wanted this bullet to succeed, but for my use, it's just... okay. Not fabulous, but not a complete failure. It's a very well made product. I can, however, already tell where it's going to fail: at the point where the wire is inserted into the controlpack. I think that most wired bullets such as this fail at either that point or where the wire goes into the bullet.

When I first opened it up, I had no idea how to put in the batteries. Upon further examination, the "ledge" that is on the front of the toy (you'll know what I mean when you see it) has a + and - symbol. This is what should be on top (thus making the opposite on the bottom). It took me a good 5 minutes to figure this out. Also, it was kind of difficult to get the second battery in.

So far, I have used this clitorally and with vaginal insertion. It felt nice for both, but when I inserted it vaginally, it kept popping out. This could just be me (probably), but it was unnerving. I paired this with a glass wand, making the wand vibrate. It worked well; there were no jarring sounds as there are with harder materials. As the vibrations are already weak, it made them even weaker with the wand, but it was still effective.

Yes, I eventually had an orgasm. The vibrations are not as strong as I would have liked;as mentioned previously, I think this is due to the jelly covering.

Because of the weak vibrations and material, I give this a 3. It would be great as a warm toy or a long session when paired with something insertable.