These may be the kinds of questions you've been asking yourself no matter if the scramble at the Memorial Coliseum was your first Rose City Rollers experience or if you've been dreaming in animal prints for years and know what it is to "pull a poodle." And I'm gonna try to answer them.

Here, I'll just try to help you figure out where the GnRs went and who's replaced them for this season. It'll take another post at least to try to figure out the other answers.

Here's the GnR team that beat the Betties to finish third in the league last June. They have a full charter of twenty skaters (Mullet and Pain—in the colorful wigs—are coaches and don't count), but Mercyful Kate's fractured her tib/fib and won't skate in the championships.

Now, follow along.

During the off-season, eight of these skaters retire:

MKate's injured and moves back to Olympia. Evilia D. Stroiu moves to Hawaii, and Boxcar Bethy also moves to Ontario.

Hard Knox, Cher The Pain, Fist O'Fury, Knocker Bown, and Axl Blows also hang up their skates. Except for Knocker, these are all veterans who have skated at least two seasons with GnR, and Axl Blows skated five seasons with RCR. Axl is a founding GnR skater who skated for RCR's travel team from before they were called the Wheels Of Justice until midway through last season; she was also the last skater with derby name that plays on the Guns N Roses theme.

During this same period, GnR drafts four new skaters—Dirty Ann Rotten, Harajuke A Girl, Havana Good Time, and Awnry O'Hulligan—and their charter stands at sixteen skaters (20 - 8 + 4 = 16).

Then come the tryouts for travel team. Punchkin, Bella Massacre, and Havana Good Time are selected for Axles of Annihilation. Smack, Napalm, Cadillac, Mangles, and Blood all skated for Wheels Of Justice last season, and all of them are chosen for WoJ again this season. All five of them also retire from GnR to skate solely for WoJ this season.

Those additional retirements leave only seven skaters from Season 5 who are chartered for Season 6. Thirteen skaters retired from GnR

Then it turns out that Mora Manipulator is moving out of state, which means she has now retired from GnR (yes, the scramble was both her debut and her farewell for RCR and GnR). Because Mora's departure leaves GnR with only thirteen skaters, the team asks for a "special draft" so they don't have to wait until the next regular draft to add a few more skaters to their charter. The league approved a special draft, which took place last Thursday and at which GnR picked up former GnR Guts & Bolts

Guts & Bolts, Scald EagleScald Eagle (who had been drafted by the Break Neck Betties but who exercised the 30-day return-to-Fresh-Meat option), and Supa SixpackSupa Sixpack.

So. If you've kept track at home, the sixteen current GnRs are:

11 Punchkin (co-captain)

69 Sugar & Vice (co-captain)

12oz Micro Bruiser

19 Harriet The Sly

28 Dirty Ann Rotten

37 Awrny O'Hulligan

38 Guts & Bolts

50 Scald Eagle

81 Havana Good Time

214 Bella Massacre

419b Juvie Hall

480 Harajuke A Girl

509 Rolla Reina

831 Slaughtra

1221 Roller Eclipse

Supa Sixpack

And those are the GnRs who will skate against the Break Neck Betties in the first regular bout of the season at the Oaks Park Hangar on Saturday night.

(Thanks to Roller Eclipse who pointed out that RCR has increased bout rosters for league teams from WFTDA's fourteen skaters to sixteen skaters, so Punchkin and Sugar don't have to decide who to keep off the roster. On the other hand, Harriet is still out injured, and Supa Sixpack has a cracked rib—already?—so only fourteen GnRs will skate on Saturday. Thanks again, Eclipse!)

6 comments:

Bout roster is now 16 skaters. So looks like you're in luck. I can't wait. GnR has up-and-coming BADASSES! And WOJ will be skating February 4th, so you'll hardly have time to miss those TT-only ladies.

I think that maybe with the current conditions of the GnR being a mostly Freshie team, that some patrons are jumping to conclusions about their ability as a team. I myself have had the honor of skating a team practice with the GnR's and it was the hardest and best practice EVER!!! I mean ever. The team work and closeness from all the skaters seems to me will make a tough component to beat after they find a good mesh of jammer and blocker connection. They definitely have passionate players with spunk and a desire to rock and roll. I think this will happen...LET's Get'em...GnR...time for WORLD Domination!!

Minor corrections: bout rosters used to be 14. Sly did not skate at the opener for medical reasons and Guts was approved to join us as a guest skater to keep the roster @ 14. The training committee has just approved the change to allow 16 skaters on home team bout rosters, however Sly is still on medical leave and new GNR Supa Sixpack has a cracked rib, so we will actually still be at 14 on this Saturday's roster. But don't count us out! I think fans will see some improvements from GNR over just 2 weeks ago!

Thank you Dr. for a time line of departures and explanations. As you can see, it has been a transformative 6 months for GnR. Please know, as mentioned above, (thank u anonymous) we are working hard and coming together. C u all Saturday! We will be listening for your support.