The Poor Worry About Money. What Do The Rich Worry About?

A study conducted by Business News Daily found that “the main source of stress for most people is money.” And, the findings of a recent study by GoBankingRates.com showed that financial fears took the lead ranking among four out of the top ten fears:

“Always living paycheck to paycheck"

"Falling into serious debt"

"Becoming homeless"

"Losing my job”

Of course, if you are living on the financial edge, you are going to worry about money and it will inevitably take its toll. Literally, worrying about money messes up the way we function. This seems obvious. But what is not so obvious is that this fear is not limited to the poor. According to a 2014 article in US News and World Report, even rich people worry about money. Maybe more so. We are talking about the top 10% of the wealthy people. It seems that having more does not cause less anxiety.

Even Family Feud asked the question: “Poor People Worry About Money. What Do Rich People Worry About?” 69% answered, “Money.” (Well, that nails it for me.) But seriously, in the US News article I cited before, 48% of well-off Boomers, who have more than $1 million saved for retirement, fear not having enough for later in life.

Surprising? Why? Because most people think having more money will make them less afraid, make them feel safe and secure… but maybe the fear around money is present whether or not you have it. Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “If I only I had [X-amount of money], my worries will go away.”? And what is that fear creating? Anxiety? Ill health? Having money doesn’t seem to guarantee freedom from worrying about it.

What would it feel like to have peace – in mind, body, and emotion around money? How is that attainable? Does anyone have that? — Your experiences with money fears exist even if you are living with everything you could think of having.

Granted, the wealthy don’t lie awake at night worrying about paying the electric bill. They do; however, cringe when they hear reports that could topple their status of wealth. They could fear what Janet Yellen is going to do about interest rates or the stock market or if it is time to buy or sell real estate. Yet some money fears creep in because the wealthy seem to see themselves as sitting on a ledge, where their money could be in jeopardy. A survey conducted by Prince & Associates, mentioned in the above referenced US News and World Report article, notes that “over 80% of people worth $20 million or more worry about being the target of a lawsuit,” and putting their wealth at risk.

Here is what our fears — about not having enough, not keeping enough, not making enough create…

The Vanderbilt family, for instance, is an example. Cornelius was worth $100 million when he died in 1877, according to Forbes, but six generations later, I’m confident that Anderson Cooper, an heir, would decry that the “well is dry.” Huntington Hartford, heir to the A&P grocery chain fortune, lost his millions and the family declared bankruptcy. The Stroh family controlled the third largest brewing company in the 1980’s and today the company is gone. There are other notables, who were rich and powerful, and have also declared bankruptcy: Michael Jackson, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Henry Heinz, Walt Disney, Milton Hersey, Mark Twain, Willie Nelson, PT Barnum, Ulysses S. Grant, among others.

It doesn’t have to be this way. Clearly all these people knew how to make money, but why the gains and losses? What part of us creates that? Maybe making it and investing it aren’t enough… how do we stop making our worst fears manifest?

Is fear around money programmed into our DNA? Maybe, I don’t know. But what I do know is that that we can make things different for our next generation. We are Boomers and we can (and do) influence our grandchildren. Change the money story in your life. Alter the DNA. You have the power to really create “Compound Interest”. Make the money conversations not centered on fear, but centered on empowerment and healthy choice. I’m not talking “airy-fairy”; I’m talking about your real “interest.” You will “Compound” this as your discussions and true intentions unfold. You will make the money connections for your grandkids: how you earned it, how you share it, how you spend it, and how you save it. Have real conversations with your grandchildren. Tell them about your mistakes and, looking back with 20/20 vision, how you would have done things differently.

Money is a symbol. It is a tool. Your hammer can’t drive the nail in by itself. Money is the business part of your life. Your money didn’t make its own decisions. Your tools can’t control you. You control your tools. Own your actions and teach your grandchildren to do the same. We made up the fear story around money… now is your chance to rewrite the story. You don’t want them to wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, the way many of us do… worrying about money.

With money comes responsibility: Responsibility for yourself and for the people around you whom you love. Of course, you want your offspring to question their actions, but not to fear them. These money conversations with your grandchildren should be from your heart, and not from your wallet. You want the memories they have of you to be about the fun and the laughs as well as the lessons, and not that the money they inherited earned 10% “compound interest.”

I remember my Grandma Jewel always saying that she wished the biggest gift she could leave us with, health. I didn’t understand that as a 10-year-old, but I do as a 60-year-old. Can you imagine being able to leave your grandkids a healthy relationship with money? You can. But, you have to come to grips with that part of your money life and legacy. Heal that part that has fears, or doubts, big or small. Pass your money on guilt-free and with love. Your legacy will echo who you are to not only your grandkids… but to the world.