Dr. Dre Has 110 Million Reasons Not To Rap

Dear Clamoring Hip-Hop Public Who Refuses To Leave Me Alone About Detox,

What’s going on? It’s Doc.

Look, I love you guys for supporting me for four decades now, but you’re really going to have to get off my back about this Detox mumbo jumbo. I know, I know. I’ve promised it for well over a decade, but hear me out. I just earned $110 million last year from hustling headphones. You think I give a damn about dropping an album half of you said you don’t even want to hear now anyway?

Look, there really are no hard feelings. I promise there aren’t, but when you’re making nine figures off some damn headphones and having your name plastered all over Forbes as #5 on their top earning celebrities list, you begin to look at the world a lot differently.

I mean, seriously, I gave you The Chronic and 2001. I just don’t want to do the album anymore, guys. You understand right? I promise to give Kendrick at least two vintage Beats By Dre on his album as a compromise.* Deal? Excellent. Deal. I knew you guys would feel me on this one. I’m out of here though. I’ve got money to count. Jay Electronica, what’s your excuse, buddy?

Sincerely,

The Guy Who Gave You NWA, Snoop, Death Row, “California Love,” Aftermath, Eminem, 50 Cent, Sorta Kinda (But Not Really) Kendrick Lamar & These Headphones Which Have Made Me Richer Than Most Small Countries AKA “Dr. Dre”

P.S. – You can read this letter through my headphones.

* – See what I did there? It was kind of like a double entendre. Who said I don’t write my own stuff?!

This is why I am not mad at the man. His legend/legacy and bank account are all solid. If I want to listen to “The D-R-E” I can listen to two classic albums and a slew of songs (and be completely satisfied – his compositions have aged very well).

You can love music and make music without releasing it. That is the beauty of the creative arts. Money clearly is not his motivation. And when it is for so many (and the terrible music that we have to endure as a result of that inspiration), you have to respect that. You may not like it… but you have to respect it.

Very true & I wholeheartedly agree! Sometimes quality is better than quanity & especially in today’s internet age where everyone is almost forced to release an album every year! Remember when it used to take most artists 2-3 years or more to release an album cause they where trying to put out the best quality product they felt they could put out to satisfy their fans! Nowadays with the way the internet is it makes people forget things more quickly & be to impatient, as well as want things to quickly instead of getting or seeking the best possible product not only for music artists but other artists & a lot of times even work of their own!

I’m sorry but in my opinion Dre was ready to give up on Detox long before this. This should have actually made it easier for him to release it as he doesn’t really have to sweat how much it will sell. I just think it’s pretty fucked that Dre and his Detox cohorts have basically strung people along for almost a decade and left us with absolutely nothing. I mean, didn’t someone say there are like 7 incarnations of Detox now or something?

As for Jay Elec and the Rothschild, it ain’t like he seeing any of her money, so he still has no excuse. Plus, I don’t know how good a look that’s gonna be for Jay if shit goes south. Just saying…