Bernd das Brot

Welcome to the first "Bernd" fan page in English language.

Bernd the Bread (or "Bernd das Brot" in German) is star of one of Germany's most popular TV series. The show has been running for about six years now.

Bernd is a tin loaf and always in a bad mood. He was designed as mascot for a bakery but turned out to be a total flop. That's why he is depressed. His arms were designed too short, which depresses him even more.

Bernd is test candidate for TV commercials and gets to test exiting new products like itching powder, shark powder and hovering anvils. He never asked for the job, but they make him do it anyway. And there is no way out...

I dicovered the show in December 2004 during my last visit to Germany and quickly became a big fan. Ever since I returned from Germany, Bernd is going with me everywhere.

I like to take Bernd's picture to document my visit at certain places, rather than polluting an otherwise perfect landscape with my face in the picture.

Just to proof the relationship: here is a rare picture of both of us together.

Bernd also became the mascot of "Bernd das Brot Team." This is a geocaching team, consisting of me and my girlfriend Judy. We started geocaching together in June 2005 and have so far located 202 caches in central and northern California and seven other states.

"Well, nobody ever asks me. But if they would, I could tell them, it was a really bad year. Just like the year before. And the year before. And even the year before. It was hell. In living colors! Pretty much like every year. My life is hell!

A wise man once said, "Hell is other people." He was right! My only hope is that it won't get worse. But it will. Every time you think it can't get any worse - it gets worse. Worse than worse. Worser worse. Yes, trust me; it will be ... it will be hell!

Forget about New Year's resolutions and give up all hope. Dig a hole and hide in it! A deep hole! I'd do that too, but my arms are too short.

Well, to wrap up this silly speech, here is the conclusion: A very bad year is over and an even worse year has just begun. Don't kid yourselves. Everything remains the same - just worse. Keep hiding and look out for the next anvil with your name on it..."