Wednesday, March 21, 2012

There are a ton of games you can play with a chronic pain syndrome. Today's game is Where Did THAT Come From? It goes like this:

1. Wake up in the morning. (Or afternoon. Your call.)
2. Roll a 1D20 (also known as a 20-sided die to the uninitiated).
3. Compare to symptoms chart to figure out if you're going to get out of bed today.
4. Roll again.
5. Compare to symptoms chart to figure out if you're going to puke today and how many times.
6. Roll again.
7. Compare to symptoms chart to figure out if you're going to pass a field sobriety test today.
8. Roll again. Repeat as many times as you like or until you decide to yield to the whim of the universe and cancel any plans and ambitions for the day.

The highlight of my game was the random and unexpected dizziness that had me lurching all over the house like the best drunks do. Forget about a field sobriety test. The walls were dancing! People PAY to impose that effect on their brain. Bet they're jealous.