A New Zealand mom's plot to convince school admissions officials that her daughter's rival had an STD went awry recently, mostly because it was totally bizarre.

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According to MSN.nz, the mother was trying to get her daughter into two prestigious high schools in Queenstown, NZ. She knew another teen was applying as well, so she called both schools, posing as sexual health worker "Anne-Marie Thompson." She then told them that the other teen needed sexual health treatment, and later that she "had a sexually transmitted disease and that she was in a relationship with another girl." Says MSN, "Everyone phoned was sceptical and followed up the claims." No shit. Like the US, New Zealand has stringent laws that govern medical privacy, stipulating that a patient's medical information can only be disclosed if authorized by the patient or under extraordinary circumstances, like a threat to public safety. Maybe "Anne-Marie Thompson" argued that the teen girl's rampant sluttiness and lesbianism were a threat to other students, but this is pretty weak, and it's not a shock that school officials were suspicious.

What is a shock is that she tried the gambit at all. Slut-shaming and rumor-spreading are reprehensible enough when they happen among teenagers, but the fact that adults engage in these behaviors too is truly depressing. The mom, whose real name hasn't been released, will pay for her weird and evil plan: she's been charged with "using a telephone for a fictitious purpose" and could get three months in prison. There's no word on whether her daughter got into school.