I think I'll keep her

Jul. 23, 2013

Legs of newborn baby / Ron Chapple/www.jupiterimages.com

Written by

Karen Gamble

[ RENAISSANCE MOM ]

When they placed my firstborn in my arms at the hospital, I didnít feel too worried. After all, there were all those nurses and doctors to step in if I didnít burp her right or swaddle her correctly.

But then discharge day came and they pushed the wheelchair to the hospital sidewalk. When my husband pulled the car up and the nurse got ready to leave us there, my heart stopped in fear. Wait! Do you mean Iím supposed to take this baby home? With me? Forever? But I donít know what Iím doing! Logically, I knew sheíd go home with us. Emotionally, I was unprepared. No parenting book on earth can prepare you for that first scary step off the hospital sidewalk and into the rest of your lives together.

It worked out, of course. It usually does. We managed to muddle our way through the maze of parenting decisions. I attribute this all to the grace of God, the help of many other parents who advised us to hang in there, and persistence.

Persistence is the key to success. Just by showing up each day, you prove that you are in it for the long haul. Hereís to you, my fellow parents, who have shown up for swim meets, soccer practices, hockey practice, scout meetings, dinnertime, bedtime tuck-ins, playing tea party (again), letting your child wear his Superman cape to the grocery store, taking your child to church, or watching your childís favorite TV show with them for the bazillionth time.

Iíve messed up many times in 19 years. Just ask my daughter. Sheíll tell you all about it, in vivid painful detail, how we took her bedroom door off its hinges when she slammed it for the second time. Or when we ďhelpedĒ her clean her room by scooping up everything into a clear bag, then requiring her to do a chore to get back one item out of the bag.

Do you have any idea how many chores it took to get her soccer uniform back for the game that afternoon? Cleats, shin guards, uniform shirt Ė oh yeah, we had a clean house that day! Or when we refused to bring her homework to school so she could turn it in on time and get an A. She got an F on that one assignment, but she never forgot an assignment at home again.

During the turbulent drama-drama years, I looked up the cost of boarding schools out of desperation. The high cost prevented us from going down that path. Now that we are (mostly) on the other side, Iím glad we managed to live together at home. Sheís funny and smart and sometimes even helpful around the house! Seeing your oldest morph from wrinkly little baby to gangly girl to teen to adult is a fascinating, frustrating, heart-wrenching process.

Why would anyone want a job where you are frequently ignored, taken for granted, and at the end, they will leave you anyway? Because itís the best job in the world and the end result is utterly worth it.