Thursday, October 27, 2005

Seeking Approval

A while back Abi asked my boy to do a cartoon of her for her website at the record company. He said he'd think about it. What? So I sent him loads of pix to work from. He did nothing. Now cartoons and in particular computer generated cartoons is what he's good at. So it shouldhave been a piece of piss for him. I tried reasoning with him. "Think of the kudos" and "Think of the head start it will give you in your career" all to no avail. Two years ago I managed to get my daughter the opportunity to shoot a video for MTV. It's available on a special edition CD of a band called "Leon". Catch it if you can. That was before she even went to University to study film. She was still in the sixth form of her school. How cool is that for a 17 year old? She even produced a thirty second cartoon video of one of their songs. The point is the old adage "you can lead a horse to water...." Is it me? Is it purely because I'm his Dad and he wont do something because I'm saying it's a great idea? If I forbade him to do it beause cartoons of a beautiful girl is the work of the devil. Do you think he'd do it then?Father came to see me today. "So you've come to see my famous photos then?" I asked hopefully."No.""What? You don't want to see the photos your son has taken that's earnt him a shit load of money?""Not particularly." he turned away.This is normal. This is what I've come to expect throughout my life. There is nothing I can do to impress the old man. I got 9 o-levels. You could have got 10. I got three A-levels. You could have got better grades. I got a degree in Biology. Why wasn't it a first class honours? I gave up. I just stopped trying after that. I became one of the worlds greatest under achievers. There was no point any more. I drifted from one dead end job to another until I finally got here. I taught myself guitar. He's never heard me play. I won a short story competition got 1st prize. He didn't want to read the story. Now I've taught myself photography. I've achieved something. He doesn't want to see the photos. Fuck it.I'm actually very proud of what I've done. I am proud of my photos. If nothing ever comes of it. I know I did a good job then. This is for me now not him.So despite my encouragement and pouring praise on my boy for his talent as an Artist, he can't be bothered. What's going on? Have I gone too far to make sure he doesn't suffer from the apathy like I did.Anyway I thought I'd try my hand at an Abi cartoon even if he wouldn't. This is what I've come up with. I know it's not as good as my boy can do. But I did my best. I really wanted to do it in a Manga style. But I'm shit at that despite my boy trying to teach me "the method".Fathers eh?At least Dels Dad came to see us when we played a big gig at O'Neils Bar. Even if he sat there for two hours sipping half a pint of bitter, looking like he wished he was somewhere else. He turned up. Bless him.We had to wait until he was gone before we could play what the crowd really wanted "Do you fuck on first date? Does your Dad own a brewery?" and several other songs, that utilised fully, the words "F*ck" and "C*nt".

So my message for tonight is. You've only got one life. Live it for yourself. Be selfish. Don't hold back for fear of upsetting your elders. They may not approve but it's your life not theirs. It's my boys life. He can choose to fuck it up if he wants, ultimately it's his choice. I can only suggest. It's not my life. I have my life and it's grand. I'm having a great time.

So as always... Rock on dudes.

iPod now playing - You only hurt the one you love by Clarence Frogman Henry