"I'm sure there's a good movie. I just can't find it hidden amid the crap."

I like some Oliver Stone movies. Really, I do. I dig JFK, I'm very pro-Natural Born Killers, Born On The Fourth Of July, Platoon...I'm a fan. But I guess it's really only just now that I'm figuring out that no matter what the story may be, if you tell it the same way every time, it's going to be boring. And frankly, Olvier Stone is starting to bore me.

Oh sure, I get what Stone's doing. He's an artiste', but use the same tricks over and over again, and eventually, the effect wears off. Repetition? Seen it. Flipping back and forth from camera trick to camera trick? Been done. Is it visual style? Or is it resting on previous achievements, and not being the innovative filmmaker that made people, and more specifically me, enjoy his work in the first place?

I'm inclined to believe it's the latter. And that's really too bad.

Oliver continues to dance with the one that brung him, so to speak. Any Given Sunday is loaded with what are now the Stone hallmarks. Rapid cuts and weird-ass camera angles. Slowed down footage. Speeded up footage. But a lot of what we're seeing doesn't match up. The scenes from the football field don't match the story being told.

The story being told is pretty straightforward. Ever see Major League? The plot's basically the same. The owner is a rich bitch (Cameron Diaz) looking to relocate to LA. Her team's coached by a grizzled veteran named D'Amato (Al Pacino, at about 5 on the 'Al Pacino Shout-O-Meter'). The team's the mishmash of aging pseudo-superstars (Dennis Quaid), young up n' comers (Jamie Foxx) and genuine, real-life drug using former players (Lawrence Taylor), among others. There's the prerequisite "surprise" cameos and bit roles (Hey, that's Johnny Unitas! Dig that crazy Ann-Margret! Look, it's NRA bigwig Chuck Heston!). Yes, Any Given Sunday boasts more actors per square inch than a 70's disaster flick, and there's some genuine star power there, but most of them have surprisingly little to do. You'd think that wouldn't be the case in a movie that runs about two and a half hours. You'd be wrong.

Any Given Sunday is bloated. The stories are all interwoven but don't always tie in. Foxx's rookie quarterback gets to shine and gets the big ego to match his success. James Woods as one of the team doctors is a bastard. Matthew Modine, also as a doctor, is not. You think he's playing the same character he did in Gross Anatomy? Quaid's veteran continually doubts his own abilities. LL Cool J snorts coke off some hooker's nipple. Which I think is really the best way to do it. So what's it all have to do with each other?

Nothing.

There's plenty of time to tell the story, but it seems forced, and there's not much in the way of resolution. The basic fabric of the story is lost due to Stone's insistence on using the same tricks he's been using for the last 10 years. It's basically a cliched story to begin with, and it certainly doesn't help that the story never builds momentum because Stone's too busy trying to be all artsy with his violence.

As for the actors, Pacino's pretty much on autopilot, but he's still watchable. His scenes with Quaid and Foxx, as coach to player, are pretty good. It explores the human side of the sport, rather than the animalistic tendencies to just plain survive. I'm surprised Stone didn't find some way to muck it up. But Foxx pretty much makes the movie his own, taking the ball and running with it, to use an overdone metaphor in a movie loaded with cliches. It's kind of a star-making performance. Wait. This movie led to Bait, didn't it? Well, anyway. Foxx does have a nice turn, going from third string QB who pukes in the huddle to a bona fide star, complete with crappy music video. He's Deion and Shaq and 'He Hate Me' all rolled into one. It's a decent performance buried because Ollie's too busy showing human eyeballs resting on the turf and busting out his camera tricks, complete with rock soundrtrack.

Some things don't change, though. Of course the big game at the end comes down to the final play. It wouldn't be a sports movie otherwise, would it?

It's really too bad. Stone's got a truly gifted cast and a pretty good story just itching to come out, but bogs it all down with the now typical Stone baggage, and that's what his filmmaking has become. The innovation is gone, the excitement is gone. What was once just wicked cool and a rush to watch is now something you can see at your local multiplex during any given matinee.

Football movie? Rudy. The Longest Yard. The Best Of Times. North Dallas Forty. Varsity Blues. Semi-Tough. Hell, even Necessary Roughness. Any one of 'em would be a better choice than this one.