Friday, April 3, 2009

Just kidding! About the naked part. It really is me. Oh, wait, who is me you say? Me is Jess over at This Life is Mine. Momma Dawg told me she would kick me in the throat asked very nicely if I would write a lil sumpin sumpin while she was off gallivanting in New Orleans.

Riddle me this…if you tell someone you are going to be out of town, then you GIVE them the keys to your residence… and that someone to whom you gave the key is someone whom you KNOW is going to be throwing a kegger, which of course then includes keg stands, why on earth would you leave your Waterford crystal out where someone could/maybe/kinda sorta/quite possibly break said valuable?

Ignorance says I.

Speaking of being put in charge…I have been asked, by various people from my graduating class, to get together our 10 year high school reunion. I was not the president of our class, I was voted most comical, so I hope they knew what they were doing when they asked me.

It may sound strange, (HA!) but I was not one to follow rules. Rules are for fools! I graduated from a very strict, very Southern Baptist Christian school. I was NOT the ideal Southern Baptist Christian school graduate. Therefore, at our reunion, there will be smoking, drinking, cursing and absolutely NO 15 minute prayers before we eat. I am just rebellious like that.

I wanted to bring some of my favorite strippers, sing karaoke and have a wet t-shirt contest, but have been advised against it. I guess I should just be happy that there will be a bar.

And now my mind is wondering…I think it might have been the mention of karaoke. Or strippers.

I have two more topics to cover here in this rambling post:

1. Savannah, Georgia and its ridiculous thieves.

2. Made up blog awards

First of all, Savannah. In the past year my Jeep has been broken into at least three times. Two of those times they unzipped the windows like a normal thief, the last time, they decided to cut a hole in the window. Each time, nothing was taken except change from the change holder and everything was strewn about.

When we left to go on vacation last month we received a call from our upstairs neighbors that some dude was trying to steal our motorcycles. This is retarded for many reasons. First of all the forks are locked on the motorcycle. Secondly, my motorcycle alone weighs close to 500lbs. You can’t exactly pick it up and walk away. Lastly, if you can afford to get a truck and a trailer to drag it onto the trailer then you have no need to steal a motorcycle.

SO, last night, Larkin was at my house for about 2 hours helping me with my 30 pack of Keystone. We all walk outside and discover that someone, while we were only 30 feet away, with the windows open, stole her spare tire from the back of her Honda CRV. They were kind enough to leave the lug nuts and the tire cover. Who the hiz-ell steals A TIRE. Really? Just ONE tire. Is the need for a 16 inch tire that great? Who does that?!

So a lovely police lady came to write the report and told us that there was also another tire stealing just a few blocks away. I thought, “Hey! This should be an easy one to catch! Just look for the guy carrying two tires and a tire wrench thingy!” However, it appears that police work is not that simple.

Steenky - in the original edit there were shout outs to whom I made the awards for...however, in posting, somehow that got lost. LET IT BE KNOWN: THE YOUR BLOG MAKES ME JUMP AWARD WAS MADE FOR STEENKY ORIGINALLY!