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Tuesday, May 17, 2016

A Rant About the NBA Lottery by a Jaded Celtics Fan

by Brandon Cuddemi

Every time the Celts have a shot in the lottery, I try to not get my hopes up. I always fail at this. And inevitably, they get the shaft, and I see red. I expect nothing different tonight. The icing on the cake will be when the Lakers get the top pick. If that happens, you should alert the authorities.

Yes, we see the irony in bitching about a team with the most championships in NBA history, but screw you.

The truth of the matter is this is kind of a bonus. It's not really the Celtics pick. It's Brooklyn's. At the time of the trade, there was no way of knowing whether Brooklyn would be this bad at this point. Danny FLEECED 'em. But now that it’s here, and the fact it represents the trade that sent Pierce and Garnett out of town, I think it warrants some luck tonight.

The other part of that is, fuck these other teams that tanked it this year. Philly should be banned from the lottery for the next decade after the embarrassing way they've gone about their business. I don't even know how many years they've been losing on purpose now. The Lakers?...blow me. They get a sit down with every big free agent just for the fact its La-La land, and nobody told them to give Kobe the most ridiculous contract in the world that crippled their potential for the last two seasons. Phoenix pulled a Major League by trading everyone and anyone who was decent in order to keep losing. Not even exaggerating, they followed this business model to a T. So they can go pound sand too. Minnesota has two great foundation guys already in Towns and Wiggins. They don't need to win another lottery. The Kings are a legitimate circus and it would be cruel to send one of the top guys to Sacramento. I could go on but you get the idea. FUCK em all.