I believe if your life is a lemon, make it a lemonade. Then go out and find someone whose life is a vodka and have a party. -- Unknown

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

I have a problem...

I really think that I have an innate inability to go with the flow. Sometimes it doesn't come through as much as other times, but I've really discovered that I can be an uptight bitch.

I don't like it when things get thrown off or aren't business as usual. In fact, when shit happens to disrupt my perfectly-tailored little world, I tend to blame anyone and anything that happens to be close.

For example, the following things have thrown me WAY off in the past couple of weeks:

Getting my period 10 days after the last one ended

Unscheduled changes to my daily routine

Being late to work (Of course, I don't have "set" hours, per se, but I have a time in my head that I NEED to be into the office so I can take care of whatever popped up overnight before being bombarded with new stuff)

Worrying about the upcoming holiday season (I really don't know why I'm stressing about it, but there's the stress anyway)

Guilt because I'm not at home with my son

This stupid Nanowrimo and Nablopomo commitment. I will probably FAIL the Nanowrimo and I hate failing.

Dr Pop's upcoming work travel (I don't like it when he's gone)

So I tend to worry and stress about things that I cannot change, which is a waste of time. And the things that are getting to me that I actually have control over? Well, I tend to just bitch about it in my head without actually DOING anything about any of it. And that just makes me feel like a failure. My head is really busy right now.

I need to buckle down, take 10 years off my face (hello Retin-A and Obagi!), 10 pounds off my body (hello Turbo Jam!), and let go of about 10,000 annoyances and worries that are out of my control (hello blog!), and just go back to enjoying the moment. Life is too short not to.