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Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

This cake is absolutely stunning - kind of like a sharp blow to the head. I know that I was forced to stare in stunned silence for a moment when I first saw it: the thought of eating that much Pepto-colored paint put me in cerebral lock down.

Still, if ever a herd of curly teal amoebas were to migrate across a shockingly pink desert, I imagine it would look something like this. (They even sent the little ones on ahead, see?) And I'm sure it can't be easy to get something edible to look so glossily non-edible, so props where they're due and all that.

But the plastic grad caps - why? No, seriously, for the love of all things cakey, why?

And I'm not going to even mention the spacing, except to say that someone should be staying after class again.

Hey, while your retinas are still smarting, check this action out:

Now, I don't know if it's because orange is my favorite color, or because those giant pillow-y swirls look so softly smooshable, but all I can think about when I look at this is how much I'd like to attack this bad boy face-first, T-Rex style. RawrMmmmmmmm.

OMG! I can't stand pink and green together. But this cake reminds me of a line from Steel Magnolias where M'lynn says about Shelby's wedding decor, that it looks like someone threw up Pepto Bismol all over the church.

Since recently discovering your blog, I have come to the opinion that whoever said "A little knoweledge is a dangerous thing" was ooh so right. Cake decorating equipment in the hands of the wrong people is the culinary equivalent of loose nukes. That top one, the pepto-teal thing...I'm torn between wanting to know and not wanting to...but what kind of cake (color) is underneath that?

What is sprinkled all over the orange cake?? Makes it hard to read! And they probably should of hand written the text to not only avoid Happy Birthday becoming one word, but make sure people know it's Dale's birthday, not Dall's.

I already thought you were awesome because of this blog, but now I learn that your favorite color is orange? Mine is too, and I share you T-Rex-y inclinations towards that cake. You have surpassed all expectations.

I'm not saying these cakes are magnificent, but I don't think I'd called them "wrecks" exactly. Maybe just not up to par. I don't think the color choices are THAT deplorable - I mean, I kind of "get" them.

Okay, the first cake is gawd-awful ugly, BUT...my actual Alma Mater (Sweet Briar College) is pink and green all the way. And probably most of us would not have a cake that was quite that...colorful, we might get a cake that is pink and green. Hopefully, white with pink and green accents.

Those teal things look like something I would make, in an attempt to fill the empty space in a reasonably decorative manner, if I was bored with traditional flowers and things, and wanted to try a different shape. And that is why I don't decorate cakes.

(The only cake I make routinely is angel food from a box, and it doesn't last long enough to get icing of any kind put on it.)

It's the orange cake had an air brush explosion with all those freckly things on the top. How bizarre! But yet, the writing is also orange which leads me to think it was actual orange icing & not air brushing... perhaps a combination. Either way... so so frighteningly bright.

Honestly, I don't think the first cake would look so bad if that pink color wasn't associated with Pepto Bismol. When I bit into it I would be expecting to taste Pepto, which is just gross. But if it weren't for that it would be cute.

I shouldn't comment twice, but this suddenly reminded me of a birthday cake I had when I was maybe 4 or 5. One of the few things I remember about that party is the weird and kind of bitter taste some of the frosting had, and I think it was the darker-colored frosting (dark purple maybe?) that was bitter, as if they'd had to add so much color that it overwhelmed the frosting. I think that's one reason I don't go in for really vivid food colors like these. Even though food coloring is probably better tasting now than in 1971 or whenever that was.

One of the few cakes I've tried to "decorate" was a pro cake from an AWESOME bakery, and wasn't really the right kind for icing decoration. So I stuck little plastic graduation-cap-shaped picks in it and called it good. (And it WAS.) So I don't have a problem with the plastic hats on this cake. I think they're cute, but even if you hate them, they're the least of its problems, no? The cheesy gold paper stickers on them are worse than the caps themselves, actually.

Very funny blog!! I voted for you. I do a blog about traveling the USA in a truck and wondered what do I have to do to become a blog of note. I looked a several and kept saying "mines better than this one". Then I stumbled upon yours and Kudo's to you very funny and well done.

I think I figured out why this cake is so horrible to look out. The pink is the exact colour negative of the green! Use a photo editing program to "Negative Image" and the colour just swap around. How head wreaking is that?

I work at a Wal-Mart, and even before I discovered this blog (or worked there) I liked to cruise by the bakery on occasion and see if they'd whipped up anything interesting. Now that I check this blog every night when I get home from work at o'dark-hundred, I also check the bakery on an almost nightly basis. Nothing good so far, unless you count the small cupcake-cake with a bold green swirly mass of icing, decorated with... little plastic hot dogs and hamburgers. Like a Tiny Plastic Sword for drinks, but... hamburgers and hot dogs, on a green cupcake-cake. I took a shot with my phone but the quality sucks.

I don't get it, either, but it was funny.

Oh, and the orange cake looks DELICIOUS. Just be glad it's (probably) not a lemon cake, or your eyes WOULD be bleeding. God, can you imagine that cake in Eyeball-Vibrating Neon Yellow?

I think the first cake must be for members of the Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority who are not known for their holding back. I recognized those colors immediately, because my senior year of college I moved into a recently vacated AKA house and EVERY room was in those colors. It had a pink toilet!!!

except for the plastic hats (mad crazy), this cake was just my style. very retro, it kind of bespeaks the golden age plastic and aqua teal.

i wish i would have got a shot of my brother's graduation cake. when he was little he would say, "i'm serious, i'm a near genius!" so we had, "reuben is a near genius" emblazoned across the top of his costco cake. only my mother ordered it and it came out "reuben is a near genisus." i had to smash it a little before it was served to make it look like a sad accident.

Lately I've seen cupcakes that claim to be flavored like Hawaiian Punch, Sunkist and 7Up (I haven't gotten up the nerve to try any, though!) I wonder if that orange cake is a full-sized version of the Sunkist cupcakes?

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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

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