Tips for the Bestman

What Exactly is Expected of a Bestman?

It’s usual to have a best man, some people even have two. The best man is the groom’s chief helper and has a fairly long list of duties and a speech to make. He also need to be organised and calm.

Duties include:

To arrange the stag party.

To help organise outfits for himself, the groom and the ushers and to make sure they’re collected.

To help the groom get ready and get him to the ceremony.

To co-ordinate and direct ushers.

To check that the buttonholes arrive and that the orders of service are ready to be handed out.

To look after the rings and hand them to the minister or groom during the ceremony.

To make sure that any fees payable on the day are settled.

To announce the speeches and the cake-cutting.

To read out cards or messages at the reception and make the final speech.

To announce the bride and groom’s departure from the reception.

What Exactly Should You Say in Your ‘Bestman’ Speech?

Thanks the groom for his toast to the bridesmaids.

Comments on the bride and particularly the groom.

Reads any messages from absent friends.

Toasts the bride and groom.

Top Tips for a Flawless Speech

Don’t panic! A little careful planning will help you deliver a speech to be proud of…

Keep to the point – 5 to 10 minutes at most.

Look up, smile and look around the guests. If you look happy and confident, you’ll sound it too.

If you’re not naturally witty, don’t try too hard. Be sincere and speak from the heart.

Prepare well in advance – not the night before.

Practise your speech out loud a few times and time it to make sure it doesn’t overrun. If possible, read it to someone who’s opinion you trust.

If you’re an inexperienced speaker, write the speech out in full rather than in note form.

Be funny if you can but avoid sexual innuendos or anything risqué. Elderly relatives will be listening as well as your friends, so it must be suitable for all.

Keep your sentences short and you language conversational and informal.

If you’re not used to speaking in public, use a microphone if there is one. If not, lift your head and project your voice – don’t talk into your notes. You’ll need to speak up to be heard at the back of the room.

Don’t rush or you’ll fall over your words. Take a deep breath and take your time.