How to Masturbate (Men)

You may think that masturbating with a penis is pretty straightforward and doesn’t require a comprehensive guide. This is giving very little credit to the art of masturbation and the multitude of pathways to explore, regardless of which set of reproductive organs you possess.

Today we’re sharing some information on how to masturbate when you own a penis. Some ideas you might want to try, some you might not – it’s all up to you.

Find your stroke. Use your hand to find a rhythm you love. Finding your rhythm when you masturbate takes time and practice. Some people enjoy rapid strokes, some enjoy slower strokes, and others like a variety. There is no limit to the ways you can use you hand to explore your penis.

When in doubt, stay consistent until you reach orgasm. Masturbation is not a one-size-fits-all thing and is something you can practice regularly. You may find that a stroke you liked at one point makes way for something else in the future. That’s totally normal.

Take your time. Regardless of what you’ve seen on popular television shows and in movies, masturbation doesn’t need to be this super fast, shameful thing you do in the dark corner of your bedroom. It doesn’t need to be a race to finish if you don’t want it to be. Every body is different and every person enjoys different things. If you learn what you like, you will be more fully equipped for interpersonal sexual experiences down the road.

Lube is your best friend. The friction of your hand directly on your penis for a prolonged period of time is not particularly good for you. Not to alarm you, but it can cause some minor desensitization in the penis. It can also leave some “rug burn.” Lube is important for all sex acts, from masturbation to intercourse.

I know lotion is a popular masturbation option, but lotion is not lube. It’s easy to find around the house and is convenient, but it isn’t ideal for masturbation. Your penis is a sensitive area. Some scented lotions may actually cause irritation (which is not fun). So, always opt for lube. (Need help choosing a lube?)

Give your balls some love. Don’t ignore your balls. They are a very sensitive area, packed with nerve endings. Try rubbing them gently with one hand while the other maintains a stroke. You can even stop stroking altogether and just pay close attention to the balls. How much pressure you put on your sack will depend on your individual preference. Try a few different options and see what works for you.

Prostate stimulation is definitely an option, too. Masturbating is not relegated solely to the penis. Your prostate is a gland just inside the anus that can feel great when stimulated. Use lube and try using your fingers or a small butt plug by inserting it into the anus. Be sure you go slowly and relax the anus before insertion. (Need help finding your P-spot?)

Keep in mind that anally stimulating yourself while stroking your penis may be challenging. It might be best to focus on one or the other, at least to start.

If you aren’t open to trying prostate stimulation, that’s perfectly all right. Everyone is has personal preferences when it comes to masturbation. Prostate stimulation is enjoyable for some and not for others. Whatever you like or what to try is totally up to you.

Hopefully you have a supportive community that values sexual health and free expression, but this isn’t the case for most people. We live in a sex-negative culture, one that puts a lot of pressure on people to act in a certain way, without providing information about the significance of sexual health in a person’s life.

Masturbation is a healthy practice and you should in no way feel ashamed for wanting to engage in it. It is a way to explore what you like, release energy, and learn about your body.

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