I got pulled over in my wheelchair again the other day. Nice cop. Very concerned. I was on the wrong side of the street, and he also suggested me changing the steady tone of my rear light to one of the flashing ones so I’m even more noticeable.

Of course I complied! As if I wouldn’t…

They all just want the crazy pothead wheelchair chick to be safe. It’s good. I like them looking out for me, cause soon I will be viral and need some extra protection. I think I know which officer I can talk into street dancing with me if I run into him again. Not literally run into him. I’m not insane, besides, he needs to be able to dance.

There are some other self-defense things in the works which should be interesting if nothing else.

I’m starting to create momentum in my town for all my pipe dreams. One day the world will notice and hopefully lives will be changed in a really good way.

The worst thing that could happen would be I make a few people smile, and if that’s all that ever happens, it’s good enough for me. On that note, enjoy your weekend.

Apparently…yes. My latest run in with the police verified that (you’re welcome, street dancers).

I’ll set the scene for you.

Late night, quiet street, slightly high crippled chick. It was perfectly quiet, calm and serene. Except the music blaring from my phone. The street was empty. The speed limit was like 35 on that road, so I probably would have managed to get out of the way if a car had happened to come by. Ok, maybe not, but I was living life to the fullest.

I had just gotten done playing a few hours of BINGO. I had won absolutely nothing like every other time I’ve gone there, but who’s counting?

I was happy. It was my night out. I was alone, I smoked a little grass after leaving the place and was in the mood to rock and roll. Sidewalks are great for daytime wheelchair outings, but I wanted to try some dance moves with my wheelchair. You know, swerving side to side, twirling around, etc. I figured the world was my playground, everyone was asleep or filming the crazy wheelchair chick through their windows as I passed by. That, and the traffic cams, was just a passing thought as I moved my chair to the rhythm of the night. It was great. Until the suburban came…

I dutifully got off to the side of the road, but the vehicle pulled into a nearby store location and turned its disco ball on for me. Ok, so they were police lights, but it should have been a disco ball. Anyway, I’ll try to paraphrase as much as I can remember of the conversation:

Officer: What are you doing?

Me: Dancing.

Officer: In the middle of the street?

Me: Yes, but there’s no one out here. It’s perfect, I love being out at night, I was playing BINGO, etc.

Officer: Does your husband and kids know where you are? (Apparently we had met before)

Me: They know I was playing BINGO.

Officer: What if some drunk had come down the road? There’s no way you could move fast enough.

Me: Fair point, I’m sorry, I’ll try to be a good girl and stay on sidewalks wherever they are available, but since you’re here, I need to talk to you about something else.

Officer: Go on.

Me: I’m glad that you know me (he had mentioned my husband, kids, even knew where I lived). The other day some kid yelled out “run Forrest, run” at me. It was funny, but it made me think, what if some night a few troublesome teens see me as an easy target. I need the whole police department to be kind of aware of the fact that there’s this crazy wheelchair girl who likes to go out at night.

Officer: You want us all to know you’re crazy?

Me: No, yes, well, I want you to know I’m out here, so I was thinking I should do or say something that you would tell your buddies about, and soon word would spread through the department and all the officers would keep a better eye out for me. I was thinking…You all confiscated some of my marijuana a while ago and I was wondering if I could get it back.

Officer: I wouldn’t ask for your weed back.

Me: Oh, you could sneak it out for me?

Officer: Please try to be careful out there.

It was so funny, the whole thing. Of course I was high at the time, so that helped.

In other news, I’m entering a huge poetry contest either today or tomorrow, so wish me luck!