10 R-Rated Road Trips For Consenting Adults Only

Hell, Michigan

Like most human experiences, the desire to seek pleasure begins in a place of frustration, loneliness, and isolation – a personal Hell, which happens to be in Michigan...

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Horneytown, North Carolina

We yearn for gratification, but the road leads to momentary disappointment in Horneytown, North Carolina...

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Blue Ball, Pennsylvania

It's a brief, overnight stay on the way to Blue Ball, Pennsylvania.But Blue Ball is one of many stops on this 9,100-mile road trip to sexual satisfaction. You seek companionship, but that's still two border crossings away...

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Dildo, Newfoundland

So you point the car northward toward Maine and Canada beyond, aiming for the eastern-most point of the Great White North. It's one of the longest legs of our journey – 35 hours. Here, in Dildo, Newfoundland, you learn the importance of self-love. Then things turn spicy...

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Morehead, North Carolina

A jaunt to Morehead, North Carolina...

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Spread Eagle, Wisconsin

... leads to Spread Eagle (Wisconsin)...

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Intercourse, Pennsylvania

Before you know it, you've doubled back to Intercourse, Pennsylvania, riding the wave of oxytocin pumping through your bloodstream like military-grade LSD...

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Climax, North Carolina

Sadly, it doesn't take long to reach Climax, North Carolina.

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Paradise, Michigan

With endorphins coursing through your veins, you fall away to Paradise, Michigan, melting into the arms of your lover, and relishing in a shared experience.But not all great road trips end in happiness – especially one chronicling human sexuality...

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Rash, Alabama

Sometime after you depart Paradise – once you're back on the road, clothed, and almost home – a Rash in Alabama appears. Maybe it's from the rigorous road trip flinging you back and forth across the eastern half of North America.

Or maybe you require cream and an oral antibiotic.

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The Road Trip

Below is a Google Map of the trip, an arduous trek through the human sexual experience that zig-zags across a good portion of the continent. To open the map and follow the trip yourself, click “More options” under “Rash Alabama 35772.” This will take you to Google Map’s webpage with the cities plotted.

Romp around the country.

Road tripping is as American as apple pie, baseball, and our country's prudish views on sexuality. Despite the latter, a number of our nation's cities have names that can't even be spoken in polite company. Our response? Road trip!

We've managed to plot the human sexual experience in road trip form, bridging the gap between the automobile and adolescent humor with one 164-hour, 9,148-mile trip across the country. Our journey begins in...