Ladera community helps family of mom who died in her sleep

Melissa Downey with her husband Ryan and children. PHOTO COURTESY OF RYAN DOWNEY

LADERA RANCH – March 28 should have been a joyous day for the Downey family of Ladera Ranch. Mother of three Melissa Downey's son Beckett was celebrating his fourth birthday. But his mother never woke up. She died in her sleep. She was 37. The family still doesn't know what happened to her, said husband Ryan Downey.

"I miss her terribly, we had so many dreams and plans," he said. "Melissa was a selfless mother, wife and friend. She was a rare gem."

The Ladera Ranch community is rallying together to help the Downey family. Family friends have started meal and donation drives and a memorial fund has brought in close to $6,000 so far. Dozens of bags of clothes, groceries and toys have poured in along with boxes of diapers and numerous gift cards.

"The community has been incredible," Downey said. "I am blown away by the kindness and generosity."

Melissa was a stay-at-home mom to the couple's three children: Siena, 6, Beckett, 4, and Lucas, 1. She was involved in the Ladera Ranch Moms Club and helped out with daycare at Holy Trinity Catholic Church in Ladera Ranch and Presbyterian Church of the Masters in Mission Viejo. She loved to play with her kids at the local parks in Ladera Ranch and going to the beach, friends said.

"She was one of those people who were always smiling and laughing," said family friend Kim Ziegelmeier. "She had such a light about her."

Melissa met Ryan when she was 22 and lived in the Bay Area. "After helping my parents get my mom through breast cancer, I got a job and that is where we met," Ryan said. "She asked me out on Oct 28, 1998 and we were together every day after."

The Downeys got married in 2002 and moved to Ladera Ranch in 2005.

Family friend and Ladera Ranch mom April Sonnenberg is working on a keepsake project for the Downey kids. She is gathering letters from friends and residents sharing memories about Melissa.

"I want friends to write about her so her young kids will know her," Sonnenberg said. She plans on creating a keepsake box for each of the kids to have as the initial grief fades and the children get older.

Support has poured in from Ladera Ranch residents who didn't even know the Downey family personally, said Ziegelmeier.

"We are all family because Ladera is such a close knit community," she said. "It could have been either one of us."

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