Dartmouth Student Arrested For Peeing On Female From Frat House Balcony

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It sure seems like Dartmouth is in the news a lot around here, doesn’t it? These Ivy Leaguers really seem to like to party, or maybe they just can’t handle their alcohol. Or both. It’s as if they break free from high school where they don’t get to run with the cool crowds, then boom, they’re suddenly thrusted into an environment they can flourish in, surrounded by nerdy and awkward brainiacs, just like themselves. And hey, good for them.

Christopher Kipouras, 19, was arrested after an investigation pegged him as the culprit in a frat house pissing. I know what you’re thinking, and no, no one’s butt got peed in (that was reported), but Kipouras did pee on a young lady, a 27-year-old woman that was there as part of a filming crew. He showered her from the second-floor balcony of the Alpha Delta fraternity house.

A 19-year-old Dartmouth College student has turned himself in to police after a woman working with a film crew at his fraternity complained a man had urinated on her from a second-floor balcony.

Hanover police said the incident happened the night of Friday, July 5, at the Alpha Delta fraternity. The 27-year-old woman, who was assisting the film crew, went to police the next day.

I’m not able to track down an active roster for this chapter, so it’s unknown if Christopher Kipouras was actually a member of the fraternity, or simply there to pee on people, but either way, he doesn’t deserve to go back. Total scumbag.

Dillon Cheverere (@RogerJDorn) is the Vice President of Media for Grandex, Inc. He's a native Texan with a full head of hair and knows his way around a nice box of red wine. Dorn graduated (BBA) with a GPA sitting in the meaty part of the bell curve, not lagging behind, but not trying to show off, either. Golf is his game now. He's long off the tee but can't putt for shit. Email: dillon@grandex.co

I remember pissing on Kat Hepburn and let me tell you. If there’s a liberal standing below you, you have every constitutional right to urinate on them. If you don’t you are clearly either a gay or a colored. It’s science.

I almost got arrested in the 6th grade for spitting off an amusement park ride and nailing some chick in the face with my loogie. It was on a class trip, so my teacher had to convince the police to let me go. True story.

Apparently disposing of your bodily fluids on somone is considered “assault” in many states. I don’t reccomend it. Unless its jizz. And its consensualish.