I'm saying that people who rise to the defense of porn the minute the very real, very disturbing implications and effects of it are pointed out are exactly like the "but not all white people are like that" or "but not all men are like that". And all I can say to that is stop. JUST STOP.
Like what you like, but don't try to steer the conversation to where you're comfortable because you get defensive about people pointing out how problematic something is.
And realize that your kinks and fetishes aren't born in a vacuum.

So my friend in the DR who is baking mainly does a lot of simple American baked goods. The problem is she uses the internet as her teacher. And the internet is great provided you know the good from the bad. There's just too many allrecipes and their ilk in there. I am more than a little aghast at a picture of her cheesecake that she put up on FB. No. No no no.
And her banana bread, which is something she makes a lot of, not particularly good. It was fine, I can see how people who don't bake or eat it very often think it's good, but I think if you gave it to anyone who's eaten a decent amount of banana bread, they'd find it really lacking.

I'm saying that people who rise to the defense of porn the minute the very real, very disturbing implications and effects of it are pointed out are exactly like the "but not all white people are like that" or "but not all men are like that". And all I can say to that is stop. JUST STOP.
Like what you like, but don't try to steer the conversation to where you're comfortable because you get defensive about people pointing out how problematic something is.
And realize that your kinks and fetishes aren't born in a vacuum.

Originally Posted by Saria

I wasn't trying to say its never like that. I'm well aware that the sex industry attracts more than their fair share of jerks. My husband and I have been friends with a couple that are big names in porn and they love their job and the people they work with. I have heard their side about how they face a lot of people that think everyone in the industry is either a misogynist or a victim. They get rude comments from people all the time from people when they find out the line of work their in because of the many people in the industry that are actually that way.

I do feel like the sex industry in the us and elsewhere needs to be greatly reworked and that more of the bad ones need to be locked up. I also think that it's very sad how 18 year old girls sign away their bodies to websites that are obviously abusive and degrading like facial abuse and the like for the money, "fame", or combination of the two. Maybe if licensing or something were in place or some kind of agency that could review these things like with mainstream films, some progress could be made. The biggest thing is to get victims of abuse to come foreword so the cycle can begin to be halted.

And it's killing me so I just have to point out that anything max hardcore says should be immediately disregarded. He is a very sick man that uses the sex industry to do disgusting things and he is a disgusting person. He served jail time for his obscene pornography which included urinating and forcing women to vomit. He was also under investigation for child pornography but nothing came of it which is surprising to me since he makes women dress up like little girls and call him "mister". :shudder: I've heard all about him from that couple I'm friends with and it's just disgusting. And sadly, I'm sure that since he's been taken down, ten more sprung up in his place.

But again, I got that you didn't say that. I'm saying that just as when there's a discussion of privilege and I don't particularly want to hear the people who benefit from privilege whine about how they're not all like that, I don't appreciate the derailing from people who like porn when a discussion about the misogyny within porn and that it in turn encourages is being had.

I am so sick of looking up more information about my autoimmune disease online trying to find out if it affects me in ways I wasn't aware of yet. I found out my medication that I need to take to survive is causing my sudden onset of cystic acne for the first time in my life. All I can find is the serious stuff, and yeah. I get that. It's deadly if not maintained. But don't any of these damn women with it ever post about their hair or skin problems?! Bah!

And I also can't believe how many articles of misinformation I found on a holistic site today. Claiming that fasting could "cure" my autoimmune disease? It's incurable! It's just treatment then maintenance until you die. And single one linked to the same study. By a woman that calls herself a doctor and claims to have a doctorate of chiropractic medicine, holistic medicine, and a masters of science education. I looked up her credentials, and the university she "earned" these from is not accredited and is ONLY online. How could you learn to be a proper chiropractor online?! The best/worst part is that all these people she has claimed were cured do not have one shred of scientific evidence. No blood panels to check levels and show that the autoantibodies "vanished". Not one thing but her word. Not even names. It's insanity. And I worry for the people that may read such utter stupidity and believe it because they don't know any better.
They didn't even have the cause correct they blamed western science on scaring everyone into thinking its a big deal when apparently all you need to do is go on a two week WATER ONLY fast and then eat fresh non processed foods. Not once was autoantibodies mentioned. I don't understand why anyone would get a kick out of lying to people with a deadly disease like that but its sick.

So my friend in the DR who is baking mainly does a lot of simple American baked goods. The problem is she uses the internet as her teacher. And the internet is great provided you know the good from the bad. There's just too many allrecipes and their ilk in there. I am more than a little aghast at a picture of her cheesecake that she put up on FB. No. No no no.
And her banana bread, which is something she makes a lot of, not particularly good. It was fine, I can see how people who don't bake or eat it very often think it's good, but I think if you gave it to anyone who's eaten a decent amount of banana bread, they'd find it really lacking.

Originally Posted by Saria

I think to be truly objective that we will need to do a taste comparison.

But again, I got that you didn't say that. I'm saying that just as when there's a discussion of privilege and I don't particularly want to hear the people who benefit from privilege whine about how they're not all like that, I don't appreciate the derailing from people who like porn when a discussion about the misogyny within porn and that it in turn encourages is being had.

Originally Posted by Saria

I understand exactly what you mean and I am sorry if I offended you. I do agree that a lot needs to change. And I do agree that if men watch violent porn frequently that violence towards women is what they're going to want to do since the degradation and pain of the woman is accompanied by his pleasure, then that connection may start to be made in real life as well. I know damn well that if I were dating a man and I saw him watching violent porn I would run for the freaking hills before he tried to make it real.

Unfortunately now it seems our society thinks women are only worth the pleasure they can give to a man, and in any despicable way that man wants it.

I'm not offended, and I can tell that you do see the problems there and can acknowledge them. It's just that too many people would rather pretend that something they like is just fine or not like the rest rather than recognizing the problems and caring more about the people being abused than the industry abusing them.

So my friend in the DR who is baking mainly does a lot of simple American baked goods. The problem is she uses the internet as her teacher. And the internet is great provided you know the good from the bad. There's just too many allrecipes and their ilk in there. I am more than a little aghast at a picture of her cheesecake that she put up on FB. No. No no no.
And her banana bread, which is something she makes a lot of, not particularly good. It was fine, I can see how people who don't bake or eat it very often think it's good, but I think if you gave it to anyone who's eaten a decent amount of banana bread, they'd find it really lacking.

Originally Posted by Saria

I think to be truly objective that we will need to do a taste comparison.

Originally Posted by Speckla

LOL, kind of impossible when she's in the DR.
Basically, the internet can be a good teacher when you already have a pretty good idea of what something should be (and I mean, she has had these things, but oy, cheesecake drowning under gloppy radioactive cherries is not how a good cheesecake should be), and when you have good sources, but otherwise, there's just too much crap out there.

Also, what's worse is that it then makes me want to bake one to give her a better idea, but I don't really like baking cheesecake because it's very rich for me and my family basically ignores it due to richness and being in the fridge. Seriously, chilled desserts are hardly ever consumed by my family because they're not right in front of them.

So my friend in the DR who is baking mainly does a lot of simple American baked goods. The problem is she uses the internet as her teacher. And the internet is great provided you know the good from the bad. There's just too many allrecipes and their ilk in there. I am more than a little aghast at a picture of her cheesecake that she put up on FB. No. No no no.
And her banana bread, which is something she makes a lot of, not particularly good. It was fine, I can see how people who don't bake or eat it very often think it's good, but I think if you gave it to anyone who's eaten a decent amount of banana bread, they'd find it really lacking.

Originally Posted by Saria

I think to be truly objective that we will need to do a taste comparison.

Originally Posted by Speckla

LOL, kind of impossible when she's in the DR.
Basically, the internet can be a good teacher when you already have a pretty good idea of what something should be (and I mean, she has had these things, but oy, cheesecake drowning under gloppy radioactive cherries is not how a good cheesecake should be), and when you have good sources, but otherwise, there's just too much crap out there.

Originally Posted by Saria

Ewwww...that's a crime against cheesecake. Good cheesecake stands on its own and a little bit of fruit (not canned!!!) should complement but not take over.

Like most foods the spices and sauces should bring out the best flavor but not be obnoxious.

I was always given a laundry list of drugs I was never allowed to try by my friends. I was never quite sure where that came from, but I would play along. Apparently, I was jacked up enough already and specific substances would make my heart explode.

Thanks to your Public Service Announcement, I live to see another day!

Originally Posted by Fifi.G

That's how a friend of mine is about me and coffee! Except it's more of a "OMG I have seen you on this stuff and NEVER AGAIN" thing. I get seriously messed up on coffee drinks - I get lightheaded and feel warm or even hot and cold in waves, and I apparently also get SO ridiculous that she was able to tell that I'd had coffee eight hours after the fact over AIM. Bit worried about the class I went and presented in right after drinking said coffee, lol. Also, when I was like mainlining caffeine for 3 days straight while in serious thesis overhaul mode...IDEK what to compare that to, or why I thought it was a good idea. I guess I was so into coffee's rep for keeping people alert and focused that I didn't even notice that what it does to me is...different. And clearly bad for my short-term health: my mom said only a full night of sleep got rid of my pallor from drinking so much of it.

Originally Posted by wild_sasparilla

I am imagining you going full on wild sasp and dancing on a coffee shop table Perhaps getting banned from Starbucks?Hehe

I know that feeling. I normally do not do more than a cup or two of coffee, on a cold day, during the winter. I get a little too wired for sound as well. I am an insomniac already. The last thing I need is even less sleep. It is hard to tell what it is doing to you, while under the 'coffee influence'.

When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

claudine - thought you'd enjoy this pic of me and my sis. Last night was Light Up Night here so lots of small town things going on all over town. Santa, contests, cookies, hot chocolate, horse and wagon rides, etc. Then we went to the Italian Civic Club for supper and everyone was wearing mustaches. We still don't know why, but we joined right in. : )

Sooo, what type of cheesecake should I make? I had originally intended to do a low-fat lemon curd swirled one because it's nice and light and beautiful, but now I'm being seduced by thoughts of coconut and lime cheesecake with brown sugar roasted pineapple. Or a caramel yogurt cheesecake. Or a vanilla bean labne one. Or a no-bake with citrus salad!