When you go out and get blind drunk this weekend; here’s something to help comfort you while you’re recovering from those hangovers:

See? It’s in your genes man. You can’t help it. And neither can those irresistibly cute monkeys. We were born to drink…some “to the last drop”. I know what you’re thinking: “If I could get me one of those drinking monkeys, I would have the ultimate drinking buddy. He’d never hold any of my crazy blackout arguments against me, or keep some insane grudge for telling him that his girlfriend is a bitch while sauced up.”
While these are true statements and reasonable to think so, it is also illegal to feed your pets alcohol. I didn’t make the rules, some crazy PETA nut probably did. So just in case you see that PETA freak, be sure to remind them of the thousands of animals PETA ‘puts to sleep for the good of the animals’ each year. See how they try to reason that a drunk monkey is worse off than a dead puppy. Bastards.