10 Magical Items Banned From eBay

The moment we found out eBay is banning magical items was the exact same moment we found out you can buy magical items on eBay. Of course! Why didn’t we think of this sooner?!

Since eBay is “discontinuing a small number of categories within the larger metaphysical subcategory,” you’ve got until the end of August to stock up on potions, curses, magic, hexes, spells and the like. We’ve found some good ones for you if you’re just itching to start buying (none of them cure itching).

Healing Dream Pillow

This amazing pillow does all the work for you while you sleep — like a magical, golden Roomba.

Three Wishes Genie

eBay

Somebody got their hands on an ancient genie and will make it grant you three wishes, but the joke’s on them, because our third wish is to set the genie freeeeeeee!

Haunted Change Purse

If you don’t support the enslavement of genies, you could always buy a haunted coin purse, and make your riches that way. (Warning: riches may come in the form of loose change.)