Fortnight on the Internets is taking a nap on Bradley Cooper’s mom’s pink thing!

On this episode, we talk about Youtube sensation Goats Yelling Like Humans and the hilarious series of Taylor Swift remixes that it sparked. We celebrate a wonderful mashup of Under the Sea from The Little Mermaid and some of the great booty anthems of all time. And we talk about the Oscars — and all the frenzied online debate fueled by the show — with our co-conspirator and correspondent Jeni Sue. With a truly spine-tingling Internet Challenge Surprise and music from Portland band Minden!

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If you subscribe or become a Liker, you’ll be able to get to new episodes faster than everyone else. You’d also be wise to follow us on our @FOTIpod Twitter account, where we often have fun interactions with the people and sites we talk about on the show…

Billboard Now Includes Youtube Views!

What better way than with a GIF to commemorate the fact that with Youtube views now part of Billboard’s pop chart calculations, the Internet has cemented its position as the nexus of American culture! On the strength of the thousands of Harlem Shake videos we told you about in Episode 23, Baauer’s “Harlem Shake” is now the #1 song in the country.

Hopefully, this mindbending mashup of “Call Me Maybe” and “Head Like a Hole” is next to climb the charts…

Fingers crossed.

Internet Report Card

This was easily the most fun I’ve ever had editing a report card, thanks to the magic of Goat Week! (Copyright Liker Brad N)

#2. Guy’s American Kitchen and Bar faux menu

And not like, “I made the joke about Bane at the Super Bowl first!” stolen. There’s no earthly way two people would independently come up with “Deep fried snake with a printed out picture of David Lee Roth on it.”

What Brian Mytko calls “haters,” I call “comedians with a legitimate plagiarism beef.” And that beef is sandblasted with five kinds of Guy’s special spices and viciously drowned in donkey sauce.

ASMR is a tricky feeling to describe, and I can only talk about it secondhand. From what I understand from conversations with ASMRers, it’s a tingle in your brain, a kind of pleasurable headache that can creep down your spine. It’s a shortcut to a blissed-out meditative state that allows you to watch long videos that for someone who doesn’t have ASMR are mind-meltingly dull. Not everyone gets this feeling, and though some people can get the tingles through sheer force of will, most depend on external “triggers” to set them off. Triggers can include getting a massage or a haircut or a manicure, or hearing someone talk in a soothing tone of voice (Bob Ross, the “let’s put a happy tree right here” painter from PBS, is a common trigger), or even just watching someone pay extremely close attention to a task, like assembling a model. It’s not usually sexual—everyone who talked to me about ASMR mentioned that right off the bat—but like sexual turn-ons, different people have different things that set them off: the sound of lips smacking together, a cashier’s fake nails tapping on the register, your friend drawing on your hand with a marker.

If this works for you — more power to you, my friend. I’m sorry to say that it didn’t work for us but maybe we need to develop our ASMR skills further…

Jeni Sue Hits the Red Carpet!

Our beloved collaborator Jeni Sue joins us to talk about her experiences covering the Oscars for FOTI.

Topics include:

Jeni’s red carpet adventures

Host Seth MacFarlane — was his schtick sexist?

Anne Hathaway and her haters

Ben Affleck’s hard-working marriage

The Jaws music cutting off visual effects Oscar winners

The Onion’s controversial tweet

J-Law’s stumble

The incredible swag at the afterparties

Also, we had to cut this for time, but you really should see this audition by “Lena Dunham” for Zero Dark Thirty.

Shoutout to the Likers!

This episode’s Liker of the Fortnightis liker Nic S., who made an audacious debut by explaining a question we asked way-back-when about single serving sites. Then he sent along this great video of MC Propane rapping along to “Harlem Shake.”

RT @jon_bois: how come he blocked the ball when the guy was clearly trying to shoot it? i guess some folks can’t stand it when others succe… 3 years ago

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