|text=You walk around to the back of the van, and throw the doors wide.

|text=You walk around to the back of the van, and throw the doors wide.

Line 25:

Line 22:

He puts on some romantic music, turns the lights down low, and hits you really hard in the skull. Man. You weren't expecting that last part! {{ouch|10}}

He puts on some romantic music, turns the lights down low, and hits you really hard in the skull. Man. You weren't expecting that last part! {{ouch|10}}

+

+

He says "This is going to excite me a lot more than it hurts you," pulls out a paddle, bends you over his knee, and gives you a sound spanking. It is quite possibly the most humiliating thing you've ever experienced. {{ouch|10}}

|miss=Worn out from chasing you around the van, he pauses to take a little nap on the mattress he keeps in the back of it.

|miss=Worn out from chasing you around the van, he pauses to take a little nap on the mattress he keeps in the back of it.

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|fumble=He shows you a doll, and asks you to point to where you'd like him to touch you. You point to a spot three feet to the doll's left, and he obligingly gropes thin air.}}

|fumble=He shows you a doll, and asks you to point to where you'd like him to touch you. You point to a spot three feet to the doll's left, and he obligingly gropes thin air.}}

−

{{acquire|item=Chorale of Companionship|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquire|item=Chorale of Companionship (item)|chance=???%}}

−

{{acquire|item=extra-greasy slider|num=some|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquire|item=extra-greasy slider|num=some}}

−

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's Aquarius medallion|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=chester's bag of candy}}

−

{{acquireClan|item=chester's bag of candy|chance=???%}}

+

<center>''or''</center>

−

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's cutoffs|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's cutoffs}}

−

{{acquireClan|item=chester's moustache|chance=???%}}

+

<center>''or''</center>

−

{{acquireClan|item=chester's muscle shirt|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=chester's moustache}}

−

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's sunglasses|chance=???%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's Aquarius medallion|chance=20%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=chester's muscle shirt|chance=20%}}

+

{{acquireClan|item=Chester's sunglasses|chance=20%}}

{{acquireClanTrophy|trophy=Handful of Chest Hair}}

{{acquireClanTrophy|trophy=Handful of Chest Hair}}

----

----

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==Notes==

==Notes==

*Chester prevents use of any [[Combat Items]], with the message:

*Chester prevents use of any [[Combat Items]], with the message:

−

*:[Chester stops you from using that item]

+

*:You don't want to use that item because you're afraid it'll get dirty.

*Hobopolis bosses are immune to effects which would cause them to be unable to act over multiple rounds, such as [[entangling noodles]], [[chloroform rag]]s, and Richard's Grenades.

+

*Hobopolis bosses are immune to effects which would cause them to be unable to act over multiple rounds, such as [[Entangling Noodles]], [[chloroform rag]]s, and Richard's Grenades.

+

*Chester has a soft damage cap, after which a special damage reduction is applied. If an attack would do no more than 500 damage, then no damage reduction is applied. Otherwise, if '''x''' is the base damage done, then the actual damage Chester takes is 500+floor(('''x'''-500)^.65). This formula is applied to any type of damage and to any source of damage.

+

*The number of extra-greasy sliders dropped increases with item drop bonuses at 1 for 100%. That is, you will receive floor(item/100) sliders. Item drop bonuses that only affect food drops do, in fact, count.

+

*Chester will always drop exactly 1 piece of his outfit.

+

*The other 3 drops have a 20% chance of dropping, unaffected by +item.

+

*{{Uncopyable}}

==References==

==References==

*"Chester" is prison slang for a CHild molESTER.

*"Chester" is prison slang for a CHild molESTER.

*The doll messages refer to a real method used by police to gather testimony from molested children in a non-threatening way (i.e. "Show me on the doll where he touched you.")

*The doll messages refer to a real method used by police to gather testimony from molested children in a non-threatening way (i.e. "Show me on the doll where he touched you.")

−

+

*The second hit message refers to several slang terms for masturbation: Beating, jerking, whacking, and jacking.

He grabs a jack from the back of the van, and beats you with it. You can't believe that jerk whacked you with a jack! Argh! Ugh! Argh! Eek! Ouch! Ow! Ugh! Ouch! Eek! Oof!

He puts on some romantic music, turns the lights down low, and hits you really hard in the skull. Man. You weren't expecting that last part! Ooh! Eek! Eek! Ow! Argh! Ouch! Argh! Ouch! Oof! Ouch!

He says "This is going to excite me a lot more than it hurts you," pulls out a paddle, bends you over his knee, and gives you a sound spanking. It is quite possibly the most humiliating thing you've ever experienced. Ow! Eek! Argh! Argh! Ooh! Ouch! Eek! Ugh! Ugh! Ouch!

Critical Hit Message:

He shows you a doll, and asks you to point to where you'd like him to touch you. You try to knock the doll out of his hands, but end up accidentally pointing at its <groin> in the process. Oof! Ugh! Oof! Argh! Oof! Ow! Argh! Eek! Ow! Ugh! (sleaze damage)

Miss Message(s):

Worn out from chasing you around the van, he pauses to take a little nap on the mattress he keeps in the back of it.

He cranks the van's stereo up, but you whippersnappers have done so much damage to your hearing with that awful Rock and Roll noise that it doesn't even faze you.

He moves as if to attack you, but starts swaying back and forth creepily to the soft music coming out of the van's stereo.

Fumble Message:

He shows you a doll, and asks you to point to where you'd like him to touch you. You point to a spot three feet to the doll's left, and he obligingly gropes thin air. (FUMBLE!)

Notes

You don't want to use that item because you're afraid it'll get dirty.

Simply being near Chester causes damage:

Just being near Chester makes you feel kind of... icky. (sleaze damage)

Hobopolis bosses are immune to effects which would cause them to be unable to act over multiple rounds, such as Entangling Noodles, chloroform rags, and Richard's Grenades.

Chester has a soft damage cap, after which a special damage reduction is applied. If an attack would do no more than 500 damage, then no damage reduction is applied. Otherwise, if x is the base damage done, then the actual damage Chester takes is 500+floor((x-500)^.65). This formula is applied to any type of damage and to any source of damage.

The number of extra-greasy sliders dropped increases with item drop bonuses at 1 for 100%. That is, you will receive floor(item/100) sliders. Item drop bonuses that only affect food drops do, in fact, count.