Monday October 29, 2007

I can’t believe it: it’s already been three weeks since the last time I wrote on my journal. I can blame a bad cold (yes, it’s already that time of the year), a lot of work, and a trip to Florida for my mother’s birthday, but I don’t think any of these is a good enough excuse. Also, I feel stupid, because writing this journal makes me feel good: I know that nobody reads it, but it’s a way for me to collect my thoughts at the end of the day, and I’ve actually missed it.

So what happened during these three weeks?

Mrs. F’s case was officially close: the Police stopped looking for her. I am still convinced she’s in London, not being found by the Police just because she doesn’t want to be found: she cut all connections with a life that wasn’t right for her, and she started a brand new life with the man she’s always been in love with. I can understand how hard it must be for her parents, though, especially for her mother, to keep living a normal life without any news of their daughter, without a single word from her in the past few months.

On James’ side, surprisingly I still don’t have much news, either: Counselor Chambers and the Police are following fading traces of microphones’ buyers, to find out who placed them in my office and used my bipolar patient James to commit violent crimes during one of his hypomania episodes. Counselor Chambers told me a few days ago that we should see some results later this week: she couldn’t be more precise, since the investigation is covered by her client confidentiality on one side, and by Police procedures on the other side, but she seemed confident.

Cooperating with the Police always excites and fascinates me, I just hope I could do more.

I just realized how frustrated I am with both these stories: things happen to my patients, who mostly rely on me to solve their problems, but apparently there’s nothing I can seem to be able to do to help them. The Police don’t let me interact with them as much as I can, and I believe Counselor Chambers tries to do as much as she’s allowed to, without putting her client and her professionalism in danger. All in all, situations are not clear, everything is still work-in-progress, and I try to leave my life as normally as I can.