REWRITING HISTORY OR SCRIMP AND SAVE: A MODERN SCREENWRITER’S SECRETS TO SUCCESS

It started with confusion, became comical, after that concern and now a combination of fear and anger.

I didn’t know what to think when I first really paid attention to the amount of films being remade/remixed/reimagined. What you do immediately notice is that they were all critically acclaimed hits that already made studios big money.

Capitalism is what the motion picture world runs on, so as the worst socialist I know, I am all for them making that cash. It’s systematic and I don’t particularly want to start growing my own vegetables and driving a car that runs on canola and rainbows.

But here’s an issue I have with it:

YOU TOUCH BACK TO THE FUTURE AND I AM COMING FOR YOU!

Look I am almost certain it’s on the list, the 80’s is in vogue right now thanks to shows like Stranger Things providing the “grand millennials” with a lot of nostalgia.

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It would end up being the Marty character going back to the 80’s (thirty year rule, like the old one) and everything would be so “heavy” or I guess some newer parlance of the day, do the youth still say “lit A.F.”? Or am I so out of touch the fact I have written that has proved I’m not myself lit?

But there are red flags straight away. A high schooler hanging out with a strange disgraced scientist who steals plutonium from Libyan terrorists? I’m not sure it’s getting made like that, are you?

Back To The Future (BTTF) is used in some film schools as an example of the perfect screenplay, did you know that?

How much of the story would be “reimagined”?

How much should be because of the current climate of stranger danger and terror cells scaring people who watch commercial news while hauled up in suburban mansions?

I don’t know, maybe I’m just too close to it, this was one of my favourite films when I was a kid (the sequels were fine), I wanted to live out my own BTTF style adventure. Perhaps I shouldn’t deny that dream for kids growing up now?

There are loads of films I wouldn’t want to see remade; Godfather, He Died With A Felafel In His Hand, 25th Hour and I’m sure more that will come to mind after I submit this article. But why not remake some crap to actually be good? Those Star Wars prequels were universally terrible?

I don’t know, these decisions are made way above my pay grade, please excuse me, I gotta hit the road… I mean where I’m going I don’t need roads… Damn, it sounded better in my head.