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Tuesday, April 22, 2014

If you didn’t know it, I’m here to tell you, your poop doesn’t
smell like roses. No one’s does. And when you do “take care of business”, it’s
kind of appropriate to flush and, hopefully, spray some air freshener or open a
window. When you don’t flush or when you don’t spray air freshener then a whole
bunch of other people get to deal with your crap. And that ain’t right. Just
sayin’. When you’ve done stunk up a place, that’s when you need your friends. (And,
case you don’t speak Tracy, while it applies literally, the “poop” I’m
referring to is when you screw up.)

Now, let’s get something straight. A friend isn’t someone
who tells you that your poop don’t stink. A real friend is someone who reminds
you to flush and suggests that some Lysol would cover over a multitude of sins.
(And a best friend goes and gets the Lysol for you!) There are way too many
people who think that if someone holds you accountable for your slip-ups, that
they aren’t a “real” friend. Honey, I’m here to tell you, we got enough people
willing to blow smoke up your butt about your dumb decisions. A real friend?
Tells you when you are about to do something stupid (or that you DID do something
stupid), loves you just the same and then supports you as you dig yourself out
of the hole you dug for yourself. Just sayin'. They DON’T tell you that what you did smells
like roses. I see too many people standing around in stinkiness pretending it
smells GREAT and talking about how everyone else is mean.

If you want someone who is only going to tell you how
wonderful you are, how funny you are, how everyone else just doesn’t “understand
you”, how everything you do and say is fine and everyone else should just “get
over it”…well, that’s not a friend. That’s a fan. And you’ll be headed to hell
in a handbasket with your fan club. And they’ll probably still be telling you
what an awesome person you are. Just sayin.'

Good heavens. Do I like it when someone comes and tells me
that I screwed up? Heck, no!But I’d
rather learn from my mistakes and actually, ya know, GROW so I don’t
end up as a 45-50-60-70 year old woman with an 11-year old maturity level!
Just sayin'.

Sure there are people who love nothing more than to tear you
down just because it makes them feel good. But remember that there are also people
who think that you are an actual adult and willing to take responsibility for
your actions. So, maybe when you are hearing people talk negatively something you do or say,
instead of gathering up your fans (remember, they AIN’T your friends!) and
letting them smooth over your ruffled feathers, find some real friends, people that
can stand up to your annoyance with them when they tell you that you’ve gotten
off kilter. If THEY say there’s nothing there…let it go. But if they say, “yep,
you screwed up” or “I’ve noticed you have a problem with this”, then it’s time
for a little reflection, prayer, and time in the Word while you let God grow
you up a bit.

Listen, if the only mistakes you own up to are the ones that
YOU acknowledge, you are probably missing 90% of the crap you are throwing out
at people. Just sayin'.

I’m not a teenager so surrounding myself with people who
make my ego feel good is pretty stupid. (And seeing so many other adults who only surround themselves with fans...it's confirmed that it is VERY stupid.) I want friends who make me laugh, who I
can talk to about the good, the bad, and the ugly, and who will keep me pointed
to Him by letting me know when I’ve gotten off track. In other words, I need to
know that when my poop stinks…someone who's gonna point it out AND expect me to do
something about it. If you don’t have anyone in your life that holds you
accountable for the stinky stuff you do and say, you need to get some. You need
to take a good hard look at who you are surrounding yourself with and realize
that you aren’t doing yourself any favors by keeping your fans entertained with
your antics.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

You ever get the blahs where nothing seems to float your boat? Yep, that's me right now. I'm pretty much not excited about anything. I have so much to do but I just cannot seem to get myself in gear.

Today I started out okay. I got myself out of bed vaguely on time and got to work on time, so that was good. Then I started bustling around working on the 90+ items of technology inventory that I couldn't find or have access to when I came to the school over spring break. Sadly a lot of these teachers have no idea what they have or don't have (a lot because their classroom closets look like they are hoarders! Seriously! Open the closet and it is packed floor to ceiling with stuff!!). Anyhow about an hour into my venture I finished as much as I could in the main building and decided to go back to my office and start updating the information that I had before moving to the other buildings. That's when I realized that I didn't jingle anymore. No, I'm not trying out for the part of Mrs. Claus. I wear my school keys on a clip on my pants so they jingle when I walk. At some point in the last hour in the 20 classrooms that I'd visited, I laid my keys down. Crap. And it's not just the master keys to this school on that key ring, it's also the keys to Edwards Middle! So I retraced my steps. And retraced my steps. I went to every classroom and asked. I finally found them in the server room in the media center after I'd gone there THREE DIFFERENT TIMES!!! So nice to know that everyone in this school has to think I'm a dingbat!! And, yes, this is the school that I've locked myself out of my office five times so far this semester. I did NOT tell the custodians that I'd lost my keys!!

Anyhow, time has marched on and I need to go peek in the 5th grade and 2nd grade classrooms now that they are at lunch and at specials respectively and try to wrap up their missing inventory. Grrr...

At least it stopped pouring rain for a moment. That was actually kind of nice. I'm in my office, got my favorite 80's Big Hair Bands playing on iTunes and then I heard the rain. It was kind of calming, to be honest.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Well, I'm a bit embarrassed. This didn't go as planned, that's for sure. I ended up only losing 8lbs. I know that this program could have really made some changes in me and how I view food and exercise, but, if I'm being honest, didn't give it the chance it deserved.

The food part I think I came to an understanding with. I understand so much better the absolute yuck that I was putting in my body on a daily (and sometimes, hourly) basis so if I look at it in that light, it was truly worth it.

It also gave Meg and I something to work on together, so that was a good thing, too.

However, our small group study bombed. We are too busy. We only met two times in the past 6 weeks because of how busy we all are. Meg and I tried to continue it, but that was kind of hard. I could have pushed the situation (and probably should have since I'm the parent) but I didn't want her to resent the Bible study.

Today is not a good day to actually be review this because I'm already battle some depression that comes with a visit from Aunt Flo. Add in a situation where I feel mentally and spiritually beat up and some being under the weather physically because of the heavy pollen count and you have one majorly grumpy, whiney, ready-to-cry-at-any-moment Tracy.

I'm going to step back, review what I did right and what I could have done better and then look at my calendar and pencil in a time to try this again. Maybe this time I'll join a Facebook or online group. I don't know. Maybe I'll just not do anything.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

So I have this pair of pants where the button has fallen
off and in its place I have a safety pin. I know I should either fix the button or I shouldn’t wear the pants. However, this girl doesn't sew much and it’s hard to find pants that fit. That combination tells you why I wear the pants the way I do. Now, I
tried wearing them as is and found out the hard way that the zipper keeps
falling down without something at the top providing closure. Hence the safety pin.

My normal “bathroom routine” with these pants is where I ran
into my problem. I usually unclip the safety pin and leave it open but still
attached to the pants. I’m usually really careful to keep half an eye on the
pin so I don’t accidentally scratch the snot out of my leg. Today…well, I wasn’t
so careful.

Today after I took care of business and was putting myself back
together…no pin. I looked around on the ground but didn’t see it. I started to
carry on with my day and just figured I’d have to be extra cautious about my
zipper when it dawned on me. The zipper came into the stall with me. It’s not
on the floor. That means that there is an opened safety pin pulled up inside my
pants. Well, THAT can’t end up well!

I dropped drawer again and gave everything a good shake. I
then heard the “clink” of metal hitting the floor and there was my safety pin.