I guess you could say I haven’t been myself lately
I’m supposed to act normal, even if I can smell your cologne
I don’t like being weird about you – it’s not my style, it’s surely not hers.
I just don’t understand how things got so…

Then I hear her whisper your name and this pit forms in the base of my stomach
How can I pretend that I don’t care
I just want to let out a scream, maybe tear her head off, just for good measure
But it wouldn’t matter even if I dared
We won’t go back to being the way things were

I feel a lot stupider than I should on a Saturday morning
This damn hangover is pounding it into my head
I saw your face last night in those devilish eyes across the counter
So I bought another round to and tried to forget

Why don’t I just pick up that phone and give you a ring and run back to you crying
That’s what I want to do anyway, some of the time
How could you do this to me? After all that we’d been, after all that we’d been through
Were you really just an asshole the whole time?
Still I want to forgive you, and let you back into my life

But we’ve been down this road before, and look what happened
There are no third chances in life
I hate being this girl I try to live up to in her presence
But I have no choice in this lie
Cuz I’m the one that handed my pearls to swine

Sorry that I’m different now, I’ve changed a lot since we’ve last spoken
And I’m a little more bitter than before
I’m not that sweet girl who loved you freely like she’d never be broken
The blame for that’s not entirely yours

Why do I even call it blame? If anyone’s at fault, the culprit is me
I chose to do what I did at the time
And I know I can never go back; I don’t want to repeat these stupid mistakes
But there’s just something missing when you’re missing from my life
So somebody remind me because I’d like to remember
Tell me can you remind me because I need to remember
Why did I hand my pearls, my pearls over
Why did I hand, hand ‘em over
Why did I hand my pearls over to swine?

About the Author: Christie Wilcox is a science writer and blogger who moonlights as a PhD student in Cell and Molecular Biology at the University of Hawaii. Follow on Google+. Follow on Twitter @NerdyChristie.