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Re: 60 to One

Update 93Years: 7, Months: 93, Days: 2824

With March successfully concluded, let’s analyse the managers’ performances as the season approaches its end.

We’ll start in Spain, where that race between Zaragoza and Barcelona continues, with ground neither being lost nor gained by either team. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona won two of their three league games this month, drawing the third. Yet a 1-1 draw with Valencia in the Copa del Rey Semi Final 2nd Leg saw them lose to Ben Cee’s team 1-2 on aggregate, although a 2-1 win over Napoli got them into the Champions League Final Eight with a total 5-2 win. As for Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid, who are eight points behind Barca, they overcame their cup disadvantage to beat Zaragoza 3-2 on aggregate, and they completed a 6-0 rout of Monaco by winning 5-0 at home in the Champions League. Yet they only converted eight of a possible twelve points in the league, drawing with Valencia and Racing.

In England, the big news is Arsenal’s takeover. English businessman Tim Travis and his consortium completed their buyout of the club this month, and Travis revealed that there would be ‘big changes sooner rather than later’. There is speculation that Tom Smith is to get the sack as part of these big changes, with Liam Ferguson to be his replacement. However, given that Smith is almost certain to deliver the title, and that Ferguson has a past history of falling short of expectations when given a lot of money, this looks to be nothing more than idle chitchat. In March, Arsenal weren’t able to extend their lead at the top of the Premier League, falling 0-2 to second-placed Liverpool at Anfield. Liverpool’s failure to pick up points at Old Trafford meant that the gap was not closed either. Arsenal also did a double over Fulham this month, winning 3-0 in the league and 2-0 in the FA Cup 6th Round. They beat Ajax 3-0 for a 5-2 aggregate advance to the Champions League Last Eight, and beat Man City in their other game. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham had a tough month where a Europa League defence was sacrificed for Premier League performance. Manchester United beat Spurs 4-1 on aggregate in the Europa League Last 16, but Dodge’s side drew goalless with the Red Devils at Old Trafford for their league game. They also beat visitors Everton 1-0, and won 3-1 at Stamford Bridge in a truly phenomenal London derby. Chelsea, incidentally, are Arsenal’s FA Cup Semi Final opponents, while Aston Villa play Man City.

Six is the magic number in Italy. It is the number of points by which Napoli trail first-placed Inter, and Udinese trail fourth-placed Roma. Lord Weeman’s title chasers have been doing everything in their power to overtake Inter this month. They won 2-0 at Genoa, and won both home games 2-0 over Roma and 3-0 over Torino. But most of all, they travelled to the Giuseppe Meazza, where they won 4-2 to give themselves a fighting chance. They also beat Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina 3-0 in the first leg of their Coppa Italia Semi Final. Taylor’s side had a slippery month, losing to Napoli then drawing with A.C. Milan. Beating Leverkusen then losing to Juventus. Losing to Leverkusen then beating Palermo and Parma by large margins. In the end, they made the Europa League Quarter Finals by beating their German opponents 3-2 on aggregate, but things are not looking so great as far as the Italian Cup is concerned.

Regarding Europe, let’s take a look at the draws for the next round. It’s the typical Anglo-Spanish fiesta in the Champions League, but the Italians are getting more and more of a say each year. There will definitely be an English side in the Semis: Arsenal face Man City, and a Spanish side: Zaragoza face Real Madrid. Meanwhile, Cool Manager plays his former club as Inter take on Liverpool, and Barcelona meet Mikael Schøler’s Juventus. The Europa League will also send an English participant into the Last Four, as Man United take on Chelsea. Fiorentina take on Getafe and A.C. Milan take on Atlético Madrid in the two meetings between Spanish and Italian teams, while the slightly lesser nations get their chance to have a Semi Finalist when Sporting CP take on Lyon.

There is plenty still to be settled, as season eight rolls on.

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award goes to;

Lord Weeman, Napoli

who did his utmost to gain points in Serie A, including winning 4-2 at the ground of the leaders. Napoli left the European stage but in a difficult tie, and ground out an extremely useful advantage in the Italian Cup Semi Final. Meanwhile, Leo Dodge performed well in the league this month at the expense of the Europa League, and Lucas Volman had a decent month at Real Madrid, as did Haowan Madridstas at Barcelona. But Weeman’s performance as a manager was superb this month – well deserved.

Re: 60 to One

A solid lead at the top of the table. Although I'm a little worried by this takeover. Hopefully I can prove my worth, and stay in a job. It would be a real shame to have got so far, to then lose out due to a takeover.

Re: 60 to One

Update 94Years: 7, Months: 94, Days: 2854

April has passed, but there is still plenty of stuff to be settled in season number eight. While we have one national league champion confirmed, two others sit with games to play to assure their fans of the title. Let’s start in Italy.

They’ve done it; the impossible that is. Lord Weeman’s Napoli actually managed to overtake Serie A leaders Inter and take the top spot for themselves. Three wins and a draw this month put them one point clear of Cool Manager’s side with just three games left to play. Brescia, Triestina and Atalanta all fell to Napoli, although Mantova offered resistance in the form of a goalless draw. Unfortunately for Napoli, they have the harder run-in, with an away match at A.C. Milan, but Inter’s own final games are not guaranteed victories, either. A 2-2 draw at Fiorentina also put Weeman and his side in the Coppa Italia Final and on the road to a double, but A.C. Milan will be trying to stop them winning that one, too.

Meanwhile, further down the table, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese, despite winning three from five this month, look almost certain to miss out on Champions League qualification. If, in the unlikely situation that Roma take just one point from the visit of Reggina and a trip to Fiorentina, Udinese will get to take fourth place by welcoming Clark Aitken’s former team. Bologna and Genoa need to both be beaten first, however. Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina had a decent month. They did of course lose in the Italian Cup, but they notched up 10 points in the league from a possible twelve. Udinese were one of the teams they defeated. They also enjoyed Europa League success, which we’ll come onto later.

Now we move over to England, where we find the confirmed title winners. Tom Smith’s Arsenal won three of their four matches this month, giving them their fourth consecutive Premier League (the most consecutive English top flight titles won by any team, ever). This 19th top flight win also makes them the team to have won the most of this division. They beat Aston Villa, Leicester, Crystal Palace and Blackburn this month, losing at Alan Irvine’s Hull, but Leicester are already relegated and Crystal Palace and Blackburn are fighting it out to avoid the final relegation place (West Brom also went down). A 2-1 win at Wembley over Chelsea sent the Gunners into the FA Cup Final to face Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa. There were plenty of celebrations in North London, not only at the Emirates, but also at White Hart Lane. With an unbeaten month in which just two points were dropped, Leo Dodge’s Tottenham broke into the top four. West Brom, Leeds, Newcastle and Sunderland all lost to Spurs this month but fifth-placed Chelsea, four points behind, have a game in hand and then a game to play. Tim Aubel’s Portsmouth welcome Tottenham in the final game, but the Tottenham board are supposedly worrying that they will lose Dodge at the end of the season. Clark Aitken is the favourite to replace the 54-year-old, but the most likely outcome is that Dodge stays.

Okay, we’ll now see how April passed on the European stage. In the Champions League Quarter Finals, Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona knocked out Mikael Schøler’s Juventus 5-1 on aggregate, with a 4-0 win at home. Inter, the other Italian side, went out as their 1-0 first leg advantage over Liverpool was cancelled out by a 0-2 defeat at Anfield. Arsenal beat Man City 3-1 on aggregate and Real Madrid beat Zaragoza 1-0 on aggregate, with both victors drawing away and winning at home. In the Semi Finals, only the first legs have been played. Despite Nani’s opener for the Catalonians, Mikey Twigge’s Liverpool beat Barcelona 2-1, although Barca are hot favourites to proceed anyway. And despite Henri Saivet’s early dismissal at the Bernabéu, Arsenal only lost 1-2 to Real Madrid, giving them perhaps their best chance in years to reach the Champions League Final. Barcelona have defeated the Gunners in six Semi Final ties and one final in the last eight years; perhaps now is the time for Arsenal to break through? As for the Europa League, all the Quarter Final first leg ties ended in draws with the exception of Chelsea hosting Man United and beating them 1-0. Atlético Madrid’s 2-0 win in the return leg knocked out A.C. Milan, likewise with Lyon’s 2-1 win over Sporting CP. Chelsea drew 1-1 at Old Trafford to reach the Last Four, and Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina achieved a spectacular 3-0 victory at Getafe to ensure their progress. What is more, a 1-1 draw at Stamford Bridge in the Semi Final makes the Final a really valid target for them. Atlético Madrid lead Lyon 4-2 in the other Semi Final.

In Spain, Zaragoza’s season pretty much self-destructed, as they fell off the title chase and into third place. They are level on points with second-placed Valencia, but 12 points behind Barcelona with just 15 to play for. This month, Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona went 18 steps closer to their fifth title in six years with six wins. First, an away trip to Hércules merited a 2-0 victory, which was followed by the same scoreline in welcoming Atlético Madrid to the Camp Nou. Tenerife were the next visitors, and were hammered 9-1 thanks to four goals from Oscar Cardozo, including a hattrick of penalties. Mallorca and Villarreal were both beaten away by one-goal margins, 2-1 and 3-2 respectively, and then a trip to Málaga saw a 2-0 victory. With four of their remaining games coming against teams sitting in 13th-19th place, no sensible person would bet against them for the title.

April is over, May has just begun! But before we march on towards the end of season eight and the start of Euro 2016, let’s take a little pause to look at the intimacies of our manager’s lives, including what they had for breakfast this morning. Okay, we won’t go that far, but let’s examine the favoured personnel list of each of our managers.

Manager of the UpdateThis award is extremely tough to give. In the end, I’m giving it to;

Lord Weeman, Napoli

since TaylorB hasn’t posted in the thread since September. Napoli put in a tremendous month to ascend to first place in Serie A, against all the odds. Fiorentina’s good league performance alongside a very good Europa League performance put Ben Taylor into contention, and a phenomenal month from Haowan Madridstas got him close too. Leo Dodge brought his Tottenham side into the top four with a superb month, and Tom Smith sealed the Premier League title for Arsenal, breaking all sorts of records in the process. Now do you see why I had such a hard time choosing a winner?

Re: 60 to One

Awesome to be setting a couple of records at Arsenal. Great to maintain the title for a fourth year running. Hopefully we can add an FA Cup win to that this season. Keep up the good work canvey!! This has been amazing so far.

Re: 60 to One

Update 95Years: 7, Months: 95, Days: 2885

With the season all coming down to these final matches, let’s see how our managers performed in May 2016, and whether they coped with the pressure. Euro 2016 is right around the corner, but there are some scores to be settled first. Scores such as 2-1, 3-0 and 1-1.

I think England is a good place to start, as they had already declared a winner. So most of Arsenal’s preparations this month were aimed at lifting the FA Cup and making it into the Champions League final, but it was a different story for Leo Dodge at Tottenham. With Champions League football up for grabs, he had to keep his Spurs team afloat and in the top four. Unfortunately, a trip to Fratton Park went slightly wrong, with Tim Aubel’s Portsmouth winning the match 2-1. Luka Modric gave Tottenham the lead from the spot, but Reto Ziegler cancelled the goal out and Bosko Jankovic gave Pompey the win. However, Manchester United’s inability to win at home to Stoke meant that Spurs clinged onto 4th place. Blackburn’s point, by the way, kept them up at the expense of James Ridley’s Crystal Palace. Otherwise, in England, attention turned to the FA Cup Final.

Road to the Final – FA CupTom Smith’s Arsenal started their cup campaign back in the Third Round with a tie against fellow Londoners Charlton. They beat the Addicks 3-0, and then travelled to St Mary’s to beat Southampton 2-0 in the Fourth Round. Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa, meanwhile, started theirs in style by annihilating Hampton and Richmond 10-0 in the Third Round. They then travelled to Bristol City and won 2-0, but faced a home tie with Liverpool in the Fifth Round. Somehow, that was won 3-1, allowing a Sixth Round tie with Leeds. As for Arsenal, they made their way into the Final Eight by winning 2-0 at Leicester. Another tie against a London club, Fulham, and another victory, 2-0, put them into the Semi Final. Villa couldn’t beat Leeds at home, drawing 1-1 but the replay proved fruitful and extra time saw the Birmingham side win 3-2. They then travelled to Wembley where they grabbed a shock 1-0 win over Man City. Arsenal beat Chelsea 2-1 to ensure their Final place.

44-year-old Howard Webb took on this FA Cup Final, where Wembley Stadium was full but for one fan. The pre-match banter had been verging on epic: Martin Bojangles controversially announced that he had no respect for Tom Smith, despite the Portuguese manager having said that he and Bojangles got on well. Would the former Hull man get thoroughly embarrassed here or would he cause an upset? The atmosphere at the kick off was brilliant, but it soon died down as it became clear that this Final wasn’t going to be a goalfest. Half time came and went, full time came and went, and still no goals. However, if a team were to score, it looked more likely to be Villa: slightly more confident in possession and with a one-man advantage thanks to Philippe Senderos’s 67th-minute second yellow card. And it was Villa who scored, thanks to Montenegrin forward Simon Vukcevic, at his sixth club in five years. His header came two minutes after extra time’s half time, and Arsenal couldn’t do anything else in the remaining 13 minutes, giving Aston Villa their first FA Cup win since 1957. To contextualise that, Ipswich, Coventry and Wimbledon had all won it more recently.

Over we go to Spain now, where it should come as little surprise that Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona have won La Liga. Victories over Murcia, Betis, Athletic and Elche this month just confirmed what we already knew. They finished the campaign with 100 points and are currently on a 48-game unbeaten streak stretching from March 2015. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid finished comfortably inside the top four, in 3rd place, rounding the season off with wins over Atlético Madrid, Villarreal, Tenerife and Mallorca. The Italian’s side also contested the Copa del Rey final.

Road to the Final – Copa del ReyBen Cee’s Valencia started their campaign in the 4th Round with a tie against Valladolid. Winning 3-0 away and 2-0 at home, they reached the next round easily. However, their cup run looked to be over fairly early on, as they fell 1-2 at home to Málaga. A remarkable 3-0 away victory sent them into the Quarter Final. As for Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid, their 4th Round victory was much bigger. They annihilated Alicante 13-0 with a home victory that notched double figures. They then dismissed Mallorca, 3-0 away and 1-0 at home. To make it into the Semi Final, they beat Getafe 3-2 despite a 1-2 away defeat in the first leg. Valencia reached the Last Four by beating Elche 3-1 away and 1-0 at home. Next came the true test for Cee’s side: a 1-0 win over visitors Barcelona surely wouldn’t be enough to reach the Final, would it? Yet a 1-1 draw at the Camp Nou put Valencia in their second consecutive Final. Real made their second consecutive Final by beating Zaragoza 3-2 in the Semi-Final, despite a 0-1 defeat in the first leg.

Barcelona’s Camp Nou was the host for the Final, and came just under a hundred short of capacity. Valencia made a brilliant start, with Yannis Tafer rounding Iker Casillas in order to hit home. Ben Cee’s side managed to maintain that lead to half time, but disaster struck early on in the second half, as that same French goalscoring hero was stretchered off with a sprained ankle. Valencia couldn’t resist for much longer, and in the 71st minute, Gonzalo Higuaín grabbed Real Madrid’s equaliser with a header from a corner, despite being marked by two Valencia players. The score stayed a 1-1 right through to full time and the end of the 120 minutes too, and the penalty shootout commenced. Real Madrid scored their first, but David Villa missed to put the pressure on Valencia right away. Four shots later, all scored, the score is 3-2 to Madrid. Yet Daniel Schwaab’s miss gives Valencia the chance to get back into it. Alas, Manuel Fernandes misses it and Wesley Sneijder gives Lucas Volman’s side the win with the fifth penalty.

Now seems like a good time to take a look at the Champions League Final. Before we do, however, let’s mention the Europa League. Chelsea overcame the difficulty of a 1-1 home draw against Fiorentina by drawing 2-2 in Italy and reaching the Final on away goals. Atlético Madrid lost 0-1 in Lyon but still progressed 4-3 on aggregate. The Final, in Turkey, was goalless until extra time, when José Antonio Reyes opened the scoring for Atlético in the 100th minute. Five minutes later, John Fleck equalised with the rebound from his missed penalty. Chelsea went on to win 5-3 on penalties, and Fleck afterwards reported that he rued his penalty miss, even though he scored from the rebound, his team won, and he himself scored in the penalty shootout. As for Europe’s biggest competition;

Road to the Final – Champions LeagueLucas Volman’s Real Madrid were drawn into Group F, against Bordeaux, Werder Bremen and Galatasaray. But for a goalless draw at Bordeaux, they won every game, including a 7-0 demolition of the Turks, and advanced in first place, alongside the French component of their group. They faced another French team, or at least a quasi-French one, Monaco, in the Last 16, and a 1-0 win in Monaco was followed by a 5-0 home victory which put them in the Last Eight. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona, on the other hand, were drawn into Group B. They won their first two games in style, 7-0 over Newcastle and 6-0 over Rapid Wien. However, they then fell 1-3 at Porto. Narrower wins over Porto and Newcastle were followed by a 7-0 victory over Rapid Wien, which put Barca through in first place, ahead of Newcastle. They faced Napoli in the First Knockout Round, and a 3-1 win away was followed by a 2-1 home victory for a comprehensive 5-2 win. Next; another Italian side. Madridstas’s team beat Juventus 4-0 at home, and held on well for a 1-1 away draw to make the Semi Finals.

Real’s Quarter Final match-up saw them contend against another Spanish side, Zaragoza. A 0-0 draw away stood them in good stead for a place in the Last Four, which they achieved thanks to a 1-0 home win. They then welcomed Arsenal to the Bernabéu, winning 2-1. They managed to hold off the Arsenal attacks at the Emirates, drawing 0-0 and thus reaching the Final. Emmanuel Adebayor’s missed penalty turned out to be the crucial blow for Arsenal. Real’s Final opponents were decided when Barcelona beat Liverpool 6-1 in Spain, overcoming the 1-2 win at Anfield for Mikey Twigge’s side.

After a break from tradition last year, yet again there would be a Barcelona versus Real Madrid Final. Shakhtar Donetsk’s Donbass Arena, host of some of the Euro 2012 games, hosted the match, and Barcelona were looking to get to business straight away. Lionel Messi scored the opening goal for Haowan Madridstas’s side three minutes in, shooting low past Iker Casillas. He then doubled the Barcelona lead in the 18th minute, with a shot that looked to go through Casillas’s legs. However, Lucas Volman’s side did grab one back before the break, with German right back Daniel Schwaab pouncing on the rebound from Klaas-Jan Huntelaar’s shot. Real Madrid went into the break 1-2 down, but Huntelaar himself put away their equaliser in the 52nd minute. In the end, though, it wasn’t to be, as Barcelona wrapped up their second consecutive title with a goal from Marquinhos.

And so to conclude with Italy, where there’s a tragic tale to be told. Lord Weeman’s Napoli always knew they’d have to get something at A.C. Milan in order to win the title, and they did get something. However, their 2-1 win was not enough, as they had earlier drawn goalless at Sampdoria. Inter’s three wins with a combined score of 11-0 this month gave them their fourth consecutive title. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese finished fifth with three wins this month, but Fiorentina missed out on European qualification, ending up 8th. Napoli did have the chance for some silverware this season, contesting the Coppa Italia Final against Napoli.

Road to the Final – Coppa ItaliaLord Weeman’s Napoli began their campaign in the 1st Round with a 3-1 win over Brescia. Roma followed, in the Quarter Final, and were beaten 3-1 also. The scoreline got one better in the first leg of the Semi Final, 3-0 over Fiorentina, and a 2-2 draw in Florence saw Napoli into the Final 5-2 on aggregate. Marco van Basten’s A.C. Milan also started in the 1st Round, beating Reggina 5-1. They then knocked out rivals and eventual Serie A Champions Inter, 2-1. The Semi Final drew them against Juventus, and despite a 0-1 loss in Turin, A.C. progressed 3-1 on aggregate.

Roma’s Olimpico, as always, hosted the Final, and once again there was an exciting start, with Napoli’s Slovakian midfielder Marek Hamsik slotting the ball into an open net after six minutes. However, A.C. Milan striker Alberto Paloschi levelled in the 63rd minute. An ability of either side to make the breakthrough led to extra time, where Hamsik put Napoli in front again with a header. Yet Mathieu Flamini’s 112th minute goal brought things back level. In the end, it took penalties to decide the match. Both teams scored their first three, but Napoli missed their fourth while A.C. Milan scored. Arturo de Falco, who I mentioned in that co-ownership thingy with Reggina, slotted home the winning penalty for Marco van Basten’s side.

So, May is over. Roll on Euro 2016!

Manager of the UpdateI think this month’s award goes to;

Haowan Madridstas, Barcelona

for securing both La Liga and the Champions League. A great finish to a great season for Madridstas, still winning even when the title was beyond doubt, and topping it off with a second consecutive Champions League in their eighth consecutive Final. Tyler Burrows won all three games this month, and Lucas Volman picked up the Copa del Rey alongside an impressive run in the league.

Re: 60 to One

Thanks all!
Euro 2016 Preview

We join the 60 to One commentary team in Italy for Euro 2012. The tournament kicks off in just three days’ time, but before that, we’re going to get our commentators to take a look at the teams competing.

In Group A, there’s quite a divide between the top two and the bottom two nations. France and the Netherlands, ranked 4th and 5th worldwide respectively, are the obvious favourites for progression here, but to be honest, a bet on Romania wouldn’t be money thrown down the drain. However, Northern Ireland aren’t expected to fare well at all, and due to the Netherlands’ usual inability to perform up to expectations, I’ll put them in second place with France winning the group.

The competition for second place is a bit more open in Group B. While hosts Italy are the obvious favourites to progress, and I do think they will win the group, anyone from Ukraine, Russia or Sweden could go through in second place. I’m going to plump for Ukraine, with Sweden finishing above Russia. However, it will be tight and very, very interesting.

Group C is a tough group, and I suppose it might come closest to what one would call a “group of death”. It is here that you will find Stuart Pearce’s England, as well as the hosts of the 2018 World Cup, Spain. They’re the slightly clearer favourites to go through, but don’t bet against Croatia. In fact, I’m not going to bet against Croatia and, given their failure to qualify for Brazil 2014, albeit under a different manager, I’m going to say that England will finish third, with Spain winning the group over Croatia. Poor Poland will finish last.

Another home nation is in action in Group D, and although I called Group C the group of death, this is probably moreso. Yes, Serbia and Scotland feature, but Serbia did very well at the last Euros, and Scotland aren’t too shabby. In the game at least. Holders Portugal are bound to waltz the group and take first place, but I don’t think Germany can hold on for second. I’m going to opt for Serbia to take it, with either Scotland or Germany finishing third. Yes, I know, I haven’t tipped any of the home nations to go through. Oh dear.

The national team managers announced their squads last month, and the biggest shock for England, apparently, is the omission of 36-year-old Steven Gerrard. The oldest player is John Terry, 35, and the youngest is Aston Villa right-back Andy Stones, looking to make his fourth appearance for England. He is one of four 22-year-olds in the squad. The most valuable player is Theo Walcott, £26M, and the least is John Terry, £1.6M. As for the other squads (* = regen);

Re: 60 to One

Update 96 and Euro 2016 ReportYears: 8, Months: 96, Days: 2915

Euro 2016 has been completed, but before we cover that, let’s take a brief look at what our managers did this month, which wasn’t very much. Germany finished atop the Sporting Play league and so got an extra Europa League place, and Greece and Italy were drawn as the other two nations to get one. So that meant that Reggina, in Serie B, would compete in Europe. They won their first match 3-0 against Zalgiris of Lithuania. The biggest win of the Second Qualifying Round First Leg was Feyenoord’s 12-0 victory over Avenir Beggen of Luxembourg, although Falkirk beat Liechtenstein’s Balzers 9-0.

Two of our leagues reset this month. Tom Smith’s Arsenal are expected to haul the Premier League title, which in unsurprising given their recent dominance. Man City have been dropped to second in the bookies’ estimations, which is also not surprising given that last year, they finished five places behind the prediction of them as title winners. Tottenham are not expected to qualify for the Champions League again, but that won’t stop them trying. They are tipped to finish 6th. Leeds, Ipswich and Birmingham are expected to go down (Ipswich and Birmingham just came up). Stoke, the other promoted side, are believed to be capable of surviving in 16th place, with Hull tipped for 17th. In Italy, the papers are predicting that A.C. Milan will win their first league title for 13 years, with Inter 2nd and Napoli 3rd. Udinese are expected to drop a place to 6th, with Fiorentina 7th. Of the newly-promoted sides, only Theo Stigarakis’s Empoli are expected to drop down again, in 19th place. Frosinone and Lecce are expected to survive, with Modena and Bologna favourites for the drop.

There were also some transfers this month, mainly among Dutch, Scottish and eastern European sides. However, Tyler Burrows of Udinese got involved in the action, buying Bari’s 19-year-old striker Antonio Martino for £400k and Genoa’s 18-year-old one Simone Toscano for £725k. The biggest transfer of the month was that of Kermit Erasmus, who moved from Feyenoord to sc Heerenveen for £6M. That makes me green with envy.

Okay, who wants to hear about Euro 2016, then? Me, me, me!

Last year’s hosts Ukraine opened the tournament, playing Russia. They took the lead and held it until the 66th minute, when Alexandr Kerzhakov equalised for Russia. Just a minute later, however, and Eugene Seleznynov had the ball in the net again for a lead that Ukraine would keep. The next Group B match saw hosts Italy grab an expected victory over Sweden. Daniele de Rossi opened the scoring from the spot in the 5th minute, with Henok Goitom equalising just two minutes later. However, a Giuseppe Rossi brace, in the 10th and 14th minute, finished the match off, and nothing else happened in the remaining 75 minutes. Next up, holders Portugal took the lead against Serbia with a João Moutinho header in the 4th minute. Moutinho would go on to get sent off, but Yannick Djaló could still make it 2-0 early in the second half. Then Germany romped to a 3-0 victory over Scotland, thanks to a brace from fictional player Daniel Bloß.

Group A was the third group to commence, and France got an easy and expected victory over Northern Ireland. Karim Benzema and Djamel Bakar, both stolen from Africa incidentally, put the French up 2-0 before 10 minutes had elapsed. Martin Paterson’s 52nd-minute goal was cancelled out by Bakar’s second in the 61st minute, and Yoann Gourcuff made it 4-1 ten minutes from time. Meanwhile, Ryan Babel got the Netherlands off to flying start against Romania, scoring in the 16th minute. The Dutch held that tenuous lead until half time, but Georginio Wijnaldum doubled it early into the second half for a 2-0 victory. Group C was the one you’ve all been waiting for, and England opened against Poland. Theo Walcott scored in the 30th minute and Wayne Rooney got his 31st goal for his country (in over 100 caps) with a penalty. England’s 2-0 win was bettered by Spain’s 3-0 one over Croatia. Fernando Torres, Francesc Fàbregas and regen defender Andrés all scored in the win.

Martin Paterson grabbed his second goal for Northern Ireland in their second game, when they pulled of a great 1-0 victory over Romania. They kept the scoreline down against the Netherlands, who beat them 1-0 thanks to Ryan Babel, but were eliminated in third place. Holland topped the group, having beaten France 2-0, Dirk Kuyt and Arjen Robben scoring, and France went through in second place with a 1-0 victory over Romania courtesy of Henri Saivet.

In Group B, Italy continued their winning streak, beating Russia 2-0 and Ukraine 3-0 to qualify for the Quarter Finals in first place. Giuseppe Rossi and Daniele de Rossi both scored twice in those two games, and Ricardo Montolivo scored once. Sweden drew goalless with Ukraine, but their 2-1 victory over Russia put the Scandinavians through in second place. Markus Rosenberg scored the opener nine minutes in, but Russia were level before half time thanks to Pavel Pogrebnyak. A goal two minutes from time from Sweden’s joint-most valuable player Albin Ekdal gave them the win.

After their thorough defeat against Germany, Scotland did manage to pick up a point against Serbia, but lost to Portugal too. Newcastle striker Gavin Brown scored against Serbia in the very first minute, but in the second half, Scotland found themselves losing due to goals from Danko Lazovic and Nemanja Vidic. John Fleck’s 75th-minute goal levelled things up. Serbia then went on to grab a second 2-2 draw, against Germany, taking a 2-0 lead with two goals in two minutes, from Danijel Aleksic and Milun Karisic, but they surrendered that lead towards the end of the second half. Germany had beaten Portugal 2-0, with yet another brace from Daniel Bloß, but the holders bounced back in the final game and, much like the opener, won 2-0 with goals from João Moutinho and Yannick Djaló.

Back to Group C, where England’s hopes took a huge dent in the form of a 1-3 loss to Spain. Croatia also won 3-1, against Poland, giving my prediction some credit. By the half-hour mark, the England vs. Spain game was settled, thanks to David Villa, Fernando Torres, Fernando Torres and Theo Walcott. In the 31st minute, Ignacio Camacho was sent off, but England couldn’t make their one-man advantage count, and nothing else happened. As for the Croatia game, Pawel Brozek opened the scoring for Poland, but goals from Eduardo, Ognjen Vukojevic and Ivica Olic allowed Croatia to steamroll to the win. However, they lost their last game. Wayne Rooney opened the scoring in the 10th minute, but Eduardo grabbed his second of the tournament in the 51st. Theo Walcott’s 84th-minute goal sent England into the Quarter Finals! Meanwhile, Bojan’s second-minute opener alongside another brace from Fernando Torres allowed Spain to beat Poland 3-0.

In the Quarter Finals, both the Netherlands and Spain recorded standard 2-0 wins. Rafael van der Vaart and Robin van Persie had the game under control before half time with a goal each, and Sweden could offer no real resistance. Spain dumped out holders and Iberian rivals Portugal. Raúl Albiol opened the scoring in the 8th minute, and Fernando Torres grabbed his seventh goal of the tournament in the 34th minute. Italy and France were locked in a deadlock: Yoann Gourcuff put the French up in the 26th minute, but Alberto Aquilani levelled things in the 64th. It took extra time for the hosts to triumph, with Napoli Reserves’ Andrea Russotto’s goal two minutes from complete full time sending them jubilantly through. England had drawn Germany, and when they couldn’t find a breakthrough in normal or extra time, we all knew that they would go out on penalites. However, while all England players scored their penalties, Jonas Schmidt missed Germany’s second one, giving England a phenomenal and surprising 5-4 penalty win.

Up next, of course, came the Semi Finals, involving four very good teams. Well, three very good teams, and England. Giuseppe Rossi had fired Italy into a 2-0 lead before half time with his brace against Spain, or at least that’s what the Italians thought. A 45+2nd minute goal from Sergio Ramos struck a crucial blow just before the break. And then, only nine minutes into the second half, Bojan equalised for the Spaniards. Step up Salvatore Foti, who pounced on a goalmouth scramble to score Italy’s winner. Time was running out for Spain, and all hopes evaporated when Sergio Ramos, in his 101st appearance, was sent off in the 88th minute. In the England vs. Netherlands match, Rafael van der Vaart put the Dutch into an expected lead in the 22nd minute. David Wheater fouled Klaas-Jan Huntelaar in the box, allowing van der Vaart to score the penalty. But all was not over! Theo Walcott dragged England back into it in the 56th minute with a header from Andy Stones’s free kick and then fired on the rebound from James Vaughan’s shot in the 88th minute to send the nation into raptures. 2-1 was the final score.

So, the European Championship Final. England would face hosts Italy. Who would win? 82,954 fans packed the Giuseppe Meazza in Milan, and they didn’t have to wait too long for a goal. Giampaolo Pazzini opened the scoring for Italy in the 27th minute, when he fired into an open goal. But just four minutes later, England were level, with Walcott heading home from Dan Gosling’s free kick. The match remained 1-1 to half time, and beyond. As the clock ticked down to the end of the 90 minutes, who should stand up to be counted but 23-year-old Mike Hay. Appearing in only his third game for England (he was uncapped before the tournament), the Middlesbrough player took a beautiful shot from just outside the penalty area. In the second of four minutes of added time, England had done it, and were the Euro 2016 Champions!

Afterwards, Italy sacked Carlo Ancelotti, Portugal sacked Carlos Queiroz and hired José Mourinho, Russia sacked Rashid Rakhimov and hired Denis Kharkov, and Ukraine fired Olexiy Mikhailichenko. Australia also have a new manager, Jason Bowman, after Andrew Johnson retired having taken them into the final World Cup qualifying phase.

Manager of the UpdateOnly two to choose from this month.

Tyler Burrows, Udinese

gets the award as it is “evident” he has some sort of goalscoring plan at Udinese, bringing in two strikers this month. He competed for the award with Stuart Pearce, who won Euro 2016 for England, but didn’t win MOTU as he isn’t one of our managers. Well played, though.

Re: 60 to One

Update 97Years: 8, Months: 97, Days: 2946

And so we enter August, with less than a month to go until the first games of the new season kick off. In the only managerial news of the month, Palermo’s Roberto Mancini took on the job of Italy manager, and although Jonte Rhodes was one of four names connected with the vacant position at Palermo, that was taken by Bob Bradley.

The other goings-on of the month were in the transfer and European arenas. However, since none of our teams enter the European competition until later, I can only really tell you about other representatives from our three nations. Reggina got through the Europa League’s second round of qualifying by beating Lithuanians Zalgiris 10-0 on aggregate, but lost on penalties to Metalurg D of Ukraine in the 3rd Qualifying Round. Villarreal, Lazio and Man City all cleared that round, beating Domzale (Slovenia) 11-0, Malmö FF (Sweden) 6-0 and Sturm Graz (Austria) 9-1 respectively. dafuge's Besiktas beat Napredak of Serbia 4-0 to progress, while Phill Ewles’s Olympiakos have a 4-0 lead over dafuge’s countrymates Kayserispor in the Champions League Best Placed Second Qualifying Phase.

And so we move on to transfers, starting in Spain. The biggest transfer of the month, so big that it came into my personal inbox, was Valencia’s £30.5M signing of Cristiano Ronaldo. He hit an average rating of 7.5 in the European Championships, although his Portugal team only reached the Quarter Finals, a rating which isn’t bad for a 31-year-old. Whether it isn’t bad for a £30.5M signing is a different matter. Our own two managers also made transfers this month. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid splashed the cash on John Obi Mikel from Lyon, £20M, and Argentine defender Diego González from Villarreal, £9.25M. They also bought that goalkeeper I’ve talked about so much, César Ruiz Díaz, from Zaragoza for £1.2M and loaned him out to Sivasspor, and Universidad LP’s Spanish goalkeeper Diego for £210k. Álvaro Arbeloa joined on a free transfer, while Tiago Luís left for Monaco in exchange for £5.25M. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona also spent plenty of money. Atlético Madrid’s Carlos Eduardo joined for £16.75M, and Valencia’s Diogo joined for £12.75M. Madridstas also signed 34-year-old Allan McGregor from Chelsea for £6M, and Andrea Russotto from Napoli for £2.7M. Meanwhile, Rafael van der Vaart joined his fourth club in three seasons, leaving Barca for A.C. Milan for £16.25M – a £3M markup on what Madridstas paid Arsenal for him.

There were few transfers elsewhere. In the Premier League, Leo Dodge’s Tottenham bought Sulley Muntari from Man City for £7.5M while releasing 36-year-old Robbie Keane on a free transfer. They also sold Tom Huddlestone to Lyon for £3.3M. However, their rivals Arsenal remained strangely quiet, simply releasing a few players. Chief amongst these was 35-year-old Kolo Touré. In Italy, Fiorentina bought both Le Mans’ Angel Di María for £5.5M and Everton’s Kyle Naughton for £4M, and sold half of their central midfielder Antonio Palombo to Inter for £1.6M. Udinese sold Alessandro Tuia to Ascoli for £2.7M. As well as the Russotto sale, Napoli raised £325k by selling young right winger Francesco Albertini to Torino.

So that’s that. Oh well, at least there’s something to look forward to next month.

Manager of the UpdateAlthough he spent a lot of money;

Haowan Madridstas, Barcelona

wins the award and he is clearly planning for the future, that future hopefully being another league title and another Champions League. Any of our managers who took part in the transfer window this month could have won it.

Re: 60 to One

Gah! Missed out on both the FA Cup and Champions League, but the dominance in the Premiership makes up for that. I hope this season we can bring in a great haul of trophies! Also great to see me sitting pretty with a 'very secure' job security rating. Perhaps I may have just jinxed myself...

Re: 60 to One

Update 98Years: 8, Months: 98, Days: 2977

So, the season has begun and our managers are settling in for their ninth year of management. Next month, they’ll hit the 3000 days in management mark, and the month after that, they’ll hit the 100 months in management mark. Let’s examine their performances in the month of August, starting with the English Premier League.

Tom Smith’s Arsenal, along with Mikey Twigge’s Liverpool and Scott Tysoe’s Everton, have captured maximum points from the first three games of the season. They beat West Ham, Hull and Stoke to get their season under way comfortable. However, a trip to nearby Wembley for the Community Shield turned into a disaster as Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa thumped the Gunners 3-0. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham didn’t manage those nine points, losing away to Sunderland, but they beat both Blackburn and Middlesbrough this month, as well as qualifying for the Champions League group stages by beating Dortmund 5-0 on aggregate.

The season is also underway in Spain, where our two managers won. Real Madrid beat Hércules 1-0, and Barcelona beat Racing 3-1, yet Haowan Madridstas’s side fell powerless against Chelsea in the UEFA Super Cup. A John Fleck hattrick secured the Pensioners a 3-1 win. But Barca did triumph in the Spanish Super Cup, with a 3-0 home victory over Real following a 2-2 draw at the Bernabéu. The other big news in Spain was transfer-related: Real Madrid bought Man United’s Sofiane Feghouli for a whopping £22M, and Barcelona bought from the other half of Manchester: taking Kaká off Man City’s hands for £8.25M. Madridstas also raised £1.5M from the sale of two players.

England was quite quiet on the transfer front. Arsenal sold young midfielder Chris Bailey to Tim Aubel’s Portsmouth for £4M but made no incoming transfers. Lord Weeman at Napoli worked the markets for a bit, selling Takayuki Morimoto to Inter for £21M, and buying Leverkusen’s Lars Bender for £11M and Everton’s Victor Moses for £2.9M. Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina made just over £10M, selling Simone Pepe to Sampdoria for £2.3M and Benito Nicolas Viola to Middlesbrough for £8M. At Udinese, Tyler Burrows bought Torino’s Facundo Zampa for £3.9M, and Inter’s Ivan Radovanovic for £3.2M, and sold Diego to Torino for £1.5M, young attacking midfielder Antonio Di Pasquale to Pisa for £575k, and Magnus Troest to Sporting for £3.4M.

Results-wise in Italy, Udinese currently top the table, although it is only after one game. They beat Sampdoria 4-1 in their opener, and also got into the Europa League group stages by beating Fehérvár of Hungary 9-0 on aggregate. Meanwhile, Fiorentina beat Juventus 2-1 and Napoli drew 1-1 with Lazio. Inter beat A.C. Milan 1-0 to claim the Italian Super Cup.

So that’s that! There are a couple of milestones coming up, and the managers want to be sticking in their job for those!

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award goes to;

Tyler Burrows, Udinese

rather fortunately, I must admit. He started his season with a good strong win, and got through a round of European football. Meanwhile, he is evidently tinkering away to put together a good squad this season. Tom Smith would have been a shoe-in for this award: a good start to the season, a neat transfer profit, but there was an aberration in the form of a 0-3 Community Shield defeat. Ben Taylor, who won his first game and made a transfer profit, was also under consideration.

Re: 60 to One

Yeah i'm sorry that I havent posted much recently but i changed schools this year and don't really go on the internet that much.
I will try to get the occasional post in though.
Can i also ask are there any stand out stats for my manager now?
KUTGW

So, the new season has really gotten underway, and our managers have also reached the 3000 days mark in football management. There were no sackings this month, obviously – it would be silly to sack your manager so soon, but there was of course plenty of action on the domestic, continental and international stages. By the way, seeing as the number of days completed by the manager ends with ‘007’, I hope that this update has license to thrill.

Let’s start with Spain, shall we? La Liga is under way, and while both of our managers are doing well, they have both dropped five points each. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid beat Recreativo and Villarreal this month but lost to Athletic Bilbao and drew with Sevilla. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona beat Villarreal and Valencia, both 3-2, but lost to Deportivo and also drew with Sevilla. Despite these two good results against the Big Two, Maz Armley’s team are in 16th place, having put together a run of four consecutive 0-0 draws before themselves losing to Athletic, 0-1. Given that their final two games of last season were 0-0 draws also, that’s a string of six consecutive 0-0 draws. There’s a record in there somewhere, I’m sure.

In Italy, two of our teams are in the Top Four. And neither of them are the one you might imagine; the one that challenged for the title last season. Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina are in 3rd place, and Tyler Burrows’s Udinese are 4th. This month, Fiorentina beat Palermo, Bologna and Genoa, but lost to fifth-placed Roma, while Udinese beat Parma and Frosinone, but lost to A.C. Milan and Lecce. Lord Weeman’s Napoli struggled, with losses to both Milan teams, a draw against Sampdoria and a narrow win against Genoa. However, with some of the more difficult ties out of the way, Weeman’s side are surely going to be climbing in the coming weeks and months.

The 2016-17 European expeditions started this month, and the Champions League will be our first focus. Four out of our five entrants top their groups at this early stage. Tom Smith’s Arsenal beat Shakhtar Donestk 2-0 at the Emirates and FC København 3-1 in Denmark to achieve this early lead. Their next game comes against Hamburger SV. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona won 3-1 at home to Panathinaikos, and though they drew 1-1 at Benfica, they lead Olympique de Marseille on four points due to a better European coefficient. They travel to France next. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham won both their games, 3-1 away to Rangers and 3-0 at home to Austria Wien (Porto are also in their group), and Real Madrid lead their Group after a 2-0 victory at St Etienne and a 3-0 one hosting Galatasaray. Their toughest tie is yet to come, and they host Iberian neighbours Sporting CP before the away game to the Portuguese. As for Napoli, they lost their first game 0-2 at Anfield, but showed no signs of a hangover as they beat visitors Red Star Belgrade 5-0. They need still play away to Ajax, however. Other Champions League group toppers are Inter, A.C. Milan and Bayern Munich. As for the Europa League, Udinese are our only competitors, and they top their group, having opened with wins against Levadia and Fenerbahçe. Next they host CFR Cluj.

Over in England, it’s the usual suspects at the top of the league again. Tom Smith’s Arsenal have 16 points after six games, having dropped two points this month with a 2-2 draw at Saint Andrew’s. Their wins this month came against Newcastle and Man City. They also played Dave Jones’s Fulham this month in the Carling Cup Third Round, beating the Cottagers 1-0. The next round sees the Gunners drawn against Newcastle. As for Leo Dodge’s Tottenham, they are third and on 13 points. They beat visitors Man United 3-1 and won 2-1 at Craven Cottage, drawing at Villa Park against Martin Bojangles’s cup- and Community Shield-winners, who are currently second. So it was a good month league-wise for Spurs, but they fell out of the Carling Cup at the first hurdle as James Ridley’s Crystal Palace, 2nd in the Championship, beat them 4-2 at Selhurst Park. Huddersfield lead the Championship, by the way, which is good for them, as this is their sixth season in the league after promotion from League One. The Eagles don’t look to be getting any further, however, with a trip to Stamford Bridge in the Fourth Round. Other ties involving our former managers: Birmingham vs. Middlesbrough, Aston Villa vs. Sunderland, Blackburn vs. Liverpool and Portsmouth vs. Bolton.

I did of course mention international football, as that took place this month, with European teams beginning their qualification campaign for the 2018 World Cup in Spain. As far as the home nations go; Northern Ireland beat Greece 2-0 at home, England got a convincing 4-0 Wembley victory over Switzerland, Scotland beat Armenia 2-0, the Republic of Ireland won 3-0 in Astana, and their groupmates Saul Goode’s Wales could only beat visitors Liechtenstein 1-0. There are more matches next month, when England take on FYR Macedonia, Northern Ireland take on France, Scotland and Wales both travel to Central Europe with ties against Slovenia and the Czech Republic respectively, and Ireland get their turn to host Liechtenstein.

So, the 100 month anniversary approaches. In Polish they wish happy birthday by saying ‘sto lat’, equivalent to ‘May you live another 100 years’. So, ‘sto lat’ to this sign-up, I guess. May it live another 100 updates. Hopefully they’ll be short and easy-to-write updates. Until Update 100, I bid you good fortune!

Manager of the UpdateThere’s really only one viable candidate for this.

Tom Smith, Arsenal

wins the update as the only manager not to lose a game. He won two out of his three league games, as well as both Champions League games and his Carling Cup game. Leo Dodge was the other manager who didn’t lose a league game, but he did lose his Carling Cup game.

Re: 60 to One

Update 100Years: 8, Months: 100, Days: 3038

So, we’ve finally arrived at Update 100. 99 updates ago, we had 60 managers (we had 3 sign-up runners, too). Now we have just seven. These managers are so experienced, and have outlasted the competition by so long, that even fifty updates ago, we only had seventeen managers. In another fifty updates, will we have any?

While we’re getting all nostalgic about the 53 who have left the process, let me update you on a couple of them. Coventry sacked Chris Coleman this month, after 3171 days in the job, and his replacement was to be Neppo Monster. Monster lasted only 236 days at Cagliari, and at his last job, Bolton, he lasted 326 days. Perhaps this is his chance to break the year barrier. Meanwhile, one of our veteran second-club managers, that is, one who has enjoyed more success with his second club than his original, Robert Boyle, was fired from Newcastle with the team in 17th place in the Premier League (one place above Boyle’s original Blackburn, incidentally). Boyle had lasted an immense 2127 days at Newcastle, a record that may not be surpassed by any of our other managers at their post-60 to One clubs. To put that into context, that score would have put him in 12th place. Instead, he finished 48th.

Anyway, that’s enough about former managers. Let’s concentrate on some of our incumbents. First of all, the incumbents in Italy. All of our managers are doing well there, and they are all in the top six. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese are the best of our three teams, sitting in a very welcome 3rd place. They are, however, seven points behind leaders A.C. Milan. This month, the Andorran manager guided his team to four wins from their five games, including a 4-0 win over Bologna. Unfortunately, the fifth game was a 1-3 defeat to Mikael Schøler’s Juventus. Udinese also beat CFR Cluj 3-0 in the Europa League. In 4th place are Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina, level with Udinese on points but behind on goal difference. They started the month poorly, losing to Inter and Napoli, but bounced back with wins over Atalanta, Modena and Brescia. Finally, in 6th place, are Lord Weeman’s Napoli. They climbed nine places to get there, but did not have a spotless month. It started well, with a 4-0 victory over Modena and a 3-0 one over Fiorentina, but they struggled away at Parma and lost 1-2, before beating both Lecce and Atalanta. They also beat Ajax 3-0 in the Champions League.

In England, Leo Dodge’s Tottenham fell a couple of places due to two defeats this month. Portsmouth and Ipswich beat them, before Spurs beat West Ham and Everton, two teams for whom Scott Tysoe has either worked or is working. The London club also grabbed a very laudable 2-1 win at Estádio de Dragão, the home of Porto, in the Champions League. As for Tottenham’s North London rivals, Tom Smith’s Arsenal,they lost this month, at Stamford Bridge, but got wins over Liverpool, Portsmouth and Leeds. They also annihilated Hamburger SV 10-0 in the Champions League, a match in which Croatian striker Eduardo scored four goals, in two pairs each two minutes apart. That’s the biggest win ever in the Champions League.

October also saw yet another international break, so let’s see how the home nations did. England beat FYR Macedonia 3-0 at Wembley, before travelling to the Ukraine and drawing goalless. Northern Ireland achieved a very credible 1-1 home draw with France, and won 3-0 in San Marino. Scotland could only draw in Slovenia, 1-1, but they beat visitors Bosnia and Herzegovina 3-1. And in Group 6, Ireland beat Liechtenstein 3-0 while Saul Goode’s Wales lost 1-3 to the Czech Republic. In the next game, it was Wales’ turn to win 3-0, hosting Kazakhstan, while Ireland drew goalless in Warsaw.

Back to domestic football now, with a trip to Spain. Atlético Madrid lead La Liga, but our two managers are both hot on their heels. Cross-city rivals Real Madrid, managed by Lucas Volman, are in second place, having won three from four this month. They beat Racing, Sporting and Deportivo, but lost 1-2 away to a resilient Ben Cee’s Valencia. They did, however, beat Sporting CP 4-1 in the Champions League and Vecindario 3-1 in the Copa del Rey. As for Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona, they also lost, and quite embarrassingly too, 0-5 away to Real Sociedad. They did win over leaders Atlético, though, and beat Eibar 2-1 away in the Copa del Rey. Unfortunately, their embarrassment against Real Sociedad was one of two losses this month, the second coming at the Stade Vélodrome, where Olympique de Marseille beat the Spaniards 1-0.

Congratulations to all the managers who have now managed for 100 months. 100 months from now it will be February 2025, and any managers still standing will have been managing for 16 years: longer than Arsène Wenger at Arsenal, and not too far behind Sir Alex Ferguson at Man United. But will there be any standing then?

Manager of the UpdateEveryone lost a game this month, so it’ll have to be;

Tom Smith, Arsenal

for losing a game only to a big team with a reputation for a strong home record, and for also thrashing European opponents 10-0. Good European opponents too.

Re: 60 to One

Update 101Years: 8, Months: 101, Days: 3068

That time has come again, the time to open the first window of the advent calendars! Before our managers do that, though, let’s scrutinise their performances in November and laugh at their incompetence.

We’ll start in Italy, where A.C. Milan continue their campaign to end Inter’s dominance. Cool Manager’s side have won Serie A for five out of the last six years, and their cross-city rivals haven’t won it since 2004. But Marco van Basten’s side now hold an eleven-point lead at the top, and that will surely have Manager quaking in his boots. Does he wear boots? Below those top two, our three managers come consecutively. Lord Weeman has his Napoli team in 3rd place, having won three from four in November, but only drawing at 17th-placed Frosinone. One point further back are Udinese, managed by Andorran Tyler Burrows. This month, they suffered, going down 0-3 at home to Inter in the opening game, and only picking up five points from the next three. And a further one point back are Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina, who drew all four games this month. November also saw the Coppa Italia First Round, where Napoli beat Palermo 4-0 and Fiorentina beat Parma 3-0. Udinese play Torino next month.

In England, Arsenal have opened up a four-point lead at the top of the Premier League, and despite a loss, they won’t be too disappointed with this month’s performance, in the league at least. They beat Blackburn 3-1 before matching that scoreline away to Sunderland. They then hosted Arnold J. Rimmer’sMiddlesbrough, beating them 3-0, but fell 2-4 to Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa. Simon Vukcevic’s two goals aided Villa’s clinical win, and it continues their run of victories over Arsenal, but Tom Smith shouldn’t lament: Villa are in good form right now and the four-point gap over second-placed Liverpool still remains. However, what may be cause for concern is their Carling Cup home defeat in the Fourth Round. Newcastle, under new manager Carlos Queiroz, beat the Gunners 2-1 at the Emirates. However, they couldn’t beat Leo Dodge’s Tottenham when the Londoners travelled to St James’ Park. That match ended goalless, two of five points dropped by Spurs this month. The other three came at the Circle, when Hull beat them 2-1, but Dodge and his team did get victories over Stoke and Birmingham.

As for the European stage, there was plenty of action this month. In the Champions League, two sets of games were played this month. Tom Smith’s Arsenal grabbed a sloppy 5-3 win in Hamburg before getting a 2-1 one in Donetsk. That qualifies them for the knockout stages as group champions, and that is yet to play the easiest match of the group: at home to FC København. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham also made it into the next round, playing two home games this month and winning them both by three-goal margins. First, they beat Portuguese team Porto 4-1, and then beat Rangers 3-0. In three of the groups, both qualifying teams have already been decided. Valencia and A.C. Milan ousted Celtic and Club Brugge, Napoli and Liverpool knocked out Ajax and Red Star Belgrade, and Real Madrid and Sporting CP eliminated Galatasary and St Etienne. This month, Lord Weeman’s Napoli won 1-0 in Amsterdam and drew 1-1 with visitors Liverpool, and Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid drew at Sporting CP but beat St Etienne 4-0 at home. In fact, the only one of our sides not to have qualified is Barcelona. They sit behind Marseille in their group, in second place, and suffered a torrid month. While they beat the French team 2-1, they lost 0-1 away to Panathanaikos, but they should qualify given that next they face bottom-placed Benfica.

As for those two clubs’ league performances, Barcelona are again the team slipping behind. Zaragoza now lead La Liga, and Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid are in second place. This month, Madrid dropped points in the form of a goalless draw at home to Betis. But they did win 2-1 at the home of cross-city rivals Atlético Madrid, and beat comfortably Real Sociedad and Elche. They also thrashed Vecindario, which sounds like a Harry Potter spell, 9-0, to secure a 12-1 passage to the Copa del Rey Fifth Round and a tie against Getafe. Barcelona also drew goalless with Betis, and with Alavés, though they beat Mallorca and Getafe. They also beat Eibar 4-0 to secure a 6-1 aggregate victory, sending them through to a double-legged tie against Athletic Bilbao. In between those two legs is a match against Athletic Bilbao.

We mentioned the Champions League earlier on. The Europa League also took place this month, and our competitior, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese, won both games 3-0. CFR Cluj came to play at Friuli and offered no resistance, and Estonians Levadia also offered no resistance in hosting the Italians. Even though each team has only played either four or five matches, many of the qualifiers for the next round are already determined. Aston Villa, Olympiakos, Standard Liege, Spartak Moscow, Atlético Madrid, AZ Alkmaar, PSV Eindhoven, Man United, Lazio, Getafe, Besiktas, Udinese, Fenerbahçe, Villarreal, Lyon and Man City are already guaranteed to be playing in the Round of 32. That leaves just eight places to be grabbed by group runners-up. In other cup news, the draw has been made for the FA Cup 3rd Round. Arsenal face a trip to Premiership side Ipswich, while Tottenham will be hosted by Gillingham. Liverpool versus Stoke and Chelsea versus Middlesbrough are the two other all-Premier League match-ups.

Manager of the Update

Lord Weeman, Napoli

gets my vote this month. He won three out of four league games, drawing the fourth, and thrashed Palermo 4-0 in the Coppa Italia, all while securing qualification from his Champions League group. He was pushed for this award by Lucas Volman, who performed much the same in Spain, but Weeman won it by a hair’s breadth.

Re: 60 to One

Thanks WW, and that would be a good idea. In England, I think the RL proportion is about right; you do get those managers that last for a good long while, like Wenger and Ferguson. In Spain, there's surely no way that Barcelona and Real Madrid would keep the same managers for eight years. I can't vouch for Italy, though.
Manager of the Update – Previous Winners

Re: 60 to One

Update 102Years: 8, Months: 102, Days: 3099

We are celebrating the coming of 2017 after a fun-filled December 2016. There were many hirings and firings this month, but our stalwart gang of seven managers remains intact. That’s not to say that a few well-established names didn’t go, but we’ll come onto that in due course.

First we’ll tackle Spain, and as it has actually been a long time since I wrote the last update, I can’t tell you that Team A has fallen off the pace, as I don’t know what the pace is. But I can tell you that Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona are rather behind, in 5th place. They could only rustle up three consecutive draws this month, 0-0 against Recreativo, and 2-2 against both Málaga and Zaragoza. But the Champions League holders did travel to Tunisia to play the Club World Championship, overcoming South Korea’s Seongnam Ilhwa Chunma 3-0 before beating D.C. United 2-0 in the Final. They also beat Benfica 5-2, and qualify in second place from their Champions League group, behind Marseille. As for our other team in Spain, they lead La Liga by four points. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid beat Getafe 5-0, before recording more modest victories over Mallorca and Alavés. Speaking of Alavés, they appointed a new manager this month. After the incumbent Neilio was snapped up by Ipswich (who in turn had lost their manager to another club), Fréderico Canvey was chosen to guide the team forward. The 43-year-old is looking to improve on rather poor spells with Stoke and Valladolid.

In Italy, A.C. Milan continue their assault on Inter’s Scudetto, and have now amassed a 14-point lead over Cool Manager’s side. Joint on points with Inter are Tyler Burrows’s Udinese, who won three out of three this month. They beat Empoli and Brescia 2-0, and Mantova 1-0. They also came through the Coppa Italia 1st Round with a 2-0 victory over Torino, setting up a Quarter Final tie at Inter, and beat both Fenerbahçe and CFR Cluj in the Europa League, 4-2 and 6-0 respectively. And the Cluj game was in Romania! Following Udinese in 4th place are Lord Weeman’s Napoli. They were involved in a seven-goal thriller this month, but lost out 3-4 to Palermo. However, they beat Mantova and Bologna in their other games, and won 6-1 in Belgrade against Red Star in the Champions League. Their Coppa Italia Quarter Final opponents were announced as Fiorentina, who overcame Parma last month.

At White Hart Lane, Leo Dodge has just come to the end of a difficult month with his Tottenham team. A 6-0 win in Vienna against Austria Wien was the best possible start to it, but that didn’t make it much easier. A home tie against Chelsea saw Pim Verbeek’s side leave the victor, but Spurs did grab a 2-2 draw at Anfield. They then came away with a brilliant 3-1 victory over Arsenal at White Hart Lane, but couldn’t beat Leeds away, losing 0-2. The month ended with a dull 1-0 at Ewood Park. As for Arsenal, they recovered well from their Tottenham defeat to beat West Ham 2-0. But the better results of the month for Tom Smith’s Gunners came before that trip to their North London neighbours. They hosted Vicente del Bosque’s Man United, and ran rampant to a 4-0 win. This saw the termination of the former Spain manager’s contract, leading to the appointment of Bryan McGuinness as his replacement. McGuinness had enjoyed moderately successful spells with Everton and Roma, but wouldn’t be the manager to bring the Premier League to Old Trafford. Former Rangers boss Pierluigi Casiraghi was announced as McGuinness’s successor at Roma. Back to Arsenal, who next beat visitors FC København 4-0. They then beat both Fulham and Everton before that Tottenham game. In other Premier League news, Middlesbrough sacked their manager of 1468 days, Arnold J. Rimmer, and appointed Tony Mowbray as his replacement. This led to Neilio’s appointment at Ipswich, and so on. Rimmer had outlasted his former position at Bolton by 260 days, and his span at The Riverside would place him in 18th had it been his original club.

The draws for the next stages of the European competitions have been made, and there are two tantalising draws in the Champions League. Lord Weeman’s Napoli host Arsenal; they always do seem to get tough sides in the Last 16. Barcelona face Tottenham in another match-up between two of our teams. There is actually a third tantalising one, although not involving any of our incumbents, when Ben Cee takes on his former club as Valencia meet Inter. Our fifth representative in the competition, Real Madrid, take on Hamburger SV of Germany. Another Germany-Spain clash will be Zaragoza versus Bayern Munich, while the two Portuguese sides, Sporting CP and Porto, face A.C. Milan and Liverpool respectively. Chelsea face Olympique de Marseille. In the Europa League, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese face PSV Eindhoven. Meanwhile, dafuge’s Besiktas face Stuttgart, Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa face Lazio, Phill Ewles’s Olympiakos face Hannover, Lawrence Lazewski’s Man City face Zenit St. Petersburg and Bryan McGuinness’s Man United face Shakhtar. PSV or Udinese will meet Hannover or Olympiakos in the Last 16, while Man City and Man United could clash.

2017 is a brave new territory for the seven managers remaining on the Starship 60 to One. We’ll soon see how they fare.

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award goes to;

Tyler Burrows, Udinese

for strolling to success in three competitions. Three wins in the league, two in the Europa League and a victory in the Coppa Italia gave Burrows major kudos for this award. He was one of just three of our managers to go unbeaten this month, as well as Lucas Volman and Haowan Madridstas, but Burrows’s winning streak puts him far ahead of those two in the running this time.

Re: 60 to One

Update 103Years: 8, Months: 103, Days: 3130

Let’s start the first update of 2017 in Italy, why not? Marco van Basten’s A.C. Milan continue to lead the way, but we have a new second-placed team. Lord Weeman’s Napoli climbed two places with five wins. They opened their account for the month with a 2-0 victory over Udinese, before sealing a comfortable 4-1 win over Roma. They then beat Lazio, Genoa and Sampdoria, and also knocked Fiorentina out of the Coppa Italia with a 1-0 victory. Udinese suffered a further two defeats in the month as well as going out of the Italian Cup, and this allowed Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina to climb to within a point of them. However, Taylor’s team lost two games this month, but they beat Parma, Frosinone and Bologna.

Tom Smith’s Arsenal continue to lead the way in the Premier League. They did drop points at St. James’ Park this month, but were consoled by victories over Hull, Birmingham, Ipswich and Chelsea. A 1-0 win saw them through the FA Cup 3rd Round against Neilio’s Ipswich, and they easily saw off Hartlepool in Round 4 with a 4-0 win, thanks to a brace from 32-year-old Emmanuel Adebayor. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham will have to get through a replay if they want a place in the Fifth Round: they were held at Selhurst Park by James Ridley’s Crystal Palace. They cleared the Third Round by winning 2-0 at Gillingham, and they also put in a decent league performance this month. Wins over Middlesbrough and cup holders Aston Villa opened the month, and one point was then gained from ties against Manchester teams; a 1-2 loss at the City of Manchester Stadium but a 2-2 draw hosting United. Sunderland and Everton, both linked by Scott Tysoe, were then beaten in Spurs’ final two games of the month. If they come through against Palace, they will host Championship leaders West Brom, while Arsenal will travel to either Reading or Wigan.

Of course, much like points mean prizes, January means transfers (I also used that line in Update 91). There was plenty to write home about this month, but I live at home so there’s no point in me sending myself a letter. So I’ll just stick it all in here. Haowan Madridstas made the joint-biggest transfer of the month by bringing Olaf Urban to the Nou Camp. The former Chelsea defensive midfielder is German and 24, having already made eight appearances for his national team. He commanded a price tag of £25.5M, matched by half of Ghanaian youngster Lawrence Agyemang, whom A.C. Milan partially purchased from Palermo. The highest non-regen transfer was of the enigmatic ‘Oscar’, who joined Real Madrid from Lazio for £21M. Real also brought in Ivorian attacking midfielder Lamine Kone from Shakhtar for £17M, and Barcelona also bought Ivan Rakitic from Chelsea for £14.75M. Meanwhile, Lord Weeman sold Marquinhos to Roma for £13.25M and Tom Smith bought out the co-ownership deal of Victor Manuel Marañón, a 22-year-old Spanish attacking midfielder, by paying Roma and A.C. Milan £9.5M each. Udinese bought Juventus midfielder Marco Larini for £4.6M.

Let’s conclude the report with some news on football in Spain. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid lead La Liga, having won four of five games this month. The crunch match between them and Barcelona ended level, but Real recorded clean sheet wins over Málaga, Zaragoza, Recreativo and Athletic Bilbao. They also came through two rounds of the Copa del Rey, beating Getafe 2-1 on aggregate in the Last 16, and Villarreal 2-1 on aggregate in the Final Eight. Barcelona’s month was just as successful as their rivals’. They also recorded four out of five wins in the league, overcoming Athletic, Hércules, Sevilla and Villarreal, and Haowan Madridstas’s team too came through two Spanish Cup rounds, defeating Athletic 5-2 and Elche 3-1. They face Atlético Madrid in the Semi Final, while Real Madrid face Zaragoza.

So, all of our teams are doing moderately well. But maybe there is a huge slip-up around the corner!

There probably isn’t, though.

Manager of the UpdateThis one is more difficult to give.

Lord Weeman, Napoli

gets this award for having a good month that came a bit out of the blue. He won all five league games and his cup game, and also made a £13.25M profit from transfers. Tom Smith and Haowan Madridstas were also in contention, but both spent money, and Lucas Volman was slightly further beyond.

Re: 60 to One

Update 104Years: 8, Months: 104, Days: 3158

As the season slips slowly into its closing stages, let’s examine the performances of our seven managers in the month of February.

Of course European competition resumed this month with the knockout stages of both the Champions League and the Europa League. In the smaller of the two, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese overpowered PSV Eindhoven with two 3-0 victories, in order to make the Last 16. His team face Phill Ewles’s Valladolid; Man City and Man United are two of the only three other sides led by our former managers to have made it this far, and they face each other too. Rangers are the other, managed by Lars Tommersen, and they face his former club, Villarreal.Just the first leg was played in the Champions League; Real Madrid look like the easiest selection for the Quarter Finals after their 2-0 win at Hamburger SV. Arsenal won 2-1 at Napoli, making them very likely Quarter Finalists, and Barcelona also lead Tottenham 2-0 after the match at the Nou Camp. Ben Cee’s Valencia welcomed his former team to Nuevo Mestalla, beating Inter 3-1.

In a surprise upset, Leo Dodge’s Tottenham failed to come through their FA Cup Fourth Round replay at home to Crystal Palace. James Ridley’s side booked their place in Round Five by scoring the only goal of the match. As some sort of scant consolation, Spurs went unbeaten in the league, beating Fulham and Ipswich and drawing with Portsmouth. As for Arsenal’s FA Cup campaign, it is still going strong. They required a replay to beat Wigan, but when it got to the second match, at the Emirates, Tom Smith’s side ran out 6-0 victors, with Frenchman Samir Nasri scoring a hattrick. The Gunners played two league games this month, with a midweek one starting March, but they were two tough games. Three points were picked up at the City of Manchester Stadium with a 2-1 victory over Lawrence Lazewski’s side, and one point was picked up at Anfield. In other England news, Tim Aubel’s Portsmouth picked up their manager’s first career title by lifting the Carling Cup after a 4-2 victory over Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa. Pompey are currently 6th in the league and are hopeful of a European spot. And ailing West Ham, in 19th place, sacked their manager Brettney Joven this month, replacing her with Jellybean Man, one of the oldest of our managers and one already well-acquainted with relegation.

We’ll hop over to Italy now, where Napoli fell back to third place due to the resilient performance of Cool Manager’s Inter. Napoli lost to Inter in the first game of the month, before grabbing five points from the next three games, including a goalless draw hosting A.C. Milan. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese sit in 4th place, hoping they can get back into the Champions League. They won all four games this month, leaving Parma, Frosinone, Juventus and Bologna trembling in their wake. Following the Andorran in fifth place is Ben Taylor and his Fiorentina side. They would have won all four; they beat Roma, Genoa and Modena and put three goals past Inter, but Manager’s side managed to put four past Fiorentina and win 4-3 away. All in all though, a good month for Taylor, although he still trails Burrows’s Champions League spot by four points.

Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid continued their campaign for La Liga with three wins out of three this month. They beat Hércules, Sevilla and Racing to notch up the maximum nine points, but a Spanish Cup draw at home to Zaragoza, 2-2, may leave them out of that competition. Barcelona had a slightly better cup result, drawing with Atlético Madrid but away from home, although they were left wanting in the league. Although Deportivo and Sporting were beaten, Haowan Madridstas’s team lost 2-3 to both Racing and Valencia. But the Catalonians moved up to 4th after Atlético lost to Fréderico Canvey’s Alavés, and the two teams will meet up at the Nou Camp in their very next game.

So there is still plenty to be lost and gained. With just over ten games remaining in each of our leagues, time is beginning to run out for those who want to sneak into European places and title spots. The season rolls on in Update 105.

Manager of the UpdateIt’s another award for;

Tyler Burrows, Udinese

after he won all four league games with ease and dumped PSV Eindhoven out of the Europa League with two 3-0 victories. Such a success in all competitions they entered was not matched by any of our other managers; Lucas Volman won in the league and the Champions League but had a very poor Copa del Rey game, and Tom Smith did well in the Champions League, but struggled slightly in the league and FA Cup. Either of those two could have won the award on another day, but not today I’m afraid.

Re: 60 to One

As it's the anniversary of the unification of Vietnam, have a free update!
Update 105Years: 8, Months: 105, Days: 3189

With the season coming towards a close, let’s start in Spain. Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid lead La Liga, but they now hold a slim one-point lead over Ben Cee’s Valencia. The Singaporean manager is looking to get Valencia their first league title since 2004. Valencia did the necessary work this month, beating Real 2-1 at the Bernabéu, and Volman also dropped two points in the form of an away draw with Deportivo, although he did guide his team to a 1-0 victory over rivals Atlético Madrid. A remarkable performance in the Spanish Cup meant that a 1-0 victory away to Zaragoza put Real through, and they beat Hamburger SV 2-0 to record a 4-0 aggregate win in the Champions League. Meanwhile, Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona have dropped out of the top four, but they are level on points with fourth-placed Atlético. This month they lost to the team from the capital in the league, although they won 3-1 in the cup to seal their Final place, 4-2. They also knocked Tottenham out of the Champions League 2-1 despite a 0-1 defeat at White Hart Lane. Their second league match was a 4-0 win over Real Sociedad.

In Italy, A.C. Milan are still unbeaten and still lead Serie A, and it is really only a question now of which two of our three sides will get Champions League football next year. Lord Weeman’s Napoli are currently looking the most likely candidates; they are in 3rd place with a five-point lead over fourth-placed Udinese. This month, Weeman won two of his matches, beating Parma and Frosinone comfortably, but lost 2-3 a crucial match against Fiorentina. They also lost 2-3 to Arsenal at the Emirates, meaning they leave the Champions League by a respectable 3-5 scoreline. Their third loss of the month was in Rome against Lazio, but the 1-2 defeat leaves them hope for the second leg of their Coppa Italia Semi Final. As for Udinese, the month cannot be described too positively by Tyler Burrows. It started with a 3-1 win over Palermo, followed by a 1-0 home victory over Olympiakos in the Europa League. Udinese then lost 0-1 at Roma and 0-1 in Greece, where Phill Ewles’s team put them out on penalties. A trip to play second-placed Inter also ended in defeat, 0-2. Finally, as well as beating Napoli, Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina beat Atalanta 4-1 in their only other game of the month.

In England, the magnanimous Leo Dodge has been paying his compliments to fellow managers. He sympathised with Birmingham boss Trevor Francis, for being in the unenviable position of 19th and likely to go down. He also stated his belief that Hull manager Alan Irvine is the man to keep the Tigers up; Hull sit 17th. Dodge had a mixed month. As promised, he didn’t do Hull any favours, beating them 3-0, but his Tottenham Hotspur team also lost 0-2 to Jellybean Man’s West Ham. There was also, of course, that 1-0 win over Barcelona which wasn’t good enough to reach the Champions League Quarter Finals. The Premier League is still led by Arsenal, who have opened up a gap of 12 points at the top. Managed by Portuguese manager Tom Smith, they won two of their three games this month; a 3-2 win at Fratton Park and a 3-0 victory at home to Leeds. They went one better in their cup tie against the Whites, beating them 4-0, and they also, of course, got their Champions League Quarter Final place at the expense of Napoli.

Rounding up with some cup news, mainly next games. Arsenal’s FA Cup Semi Final will come against fellow Londoners Chelsea, and will be hosted at Wembley as per the norm. The other Semi Final will see Liverpool taking on West Ham, so there is the possibility of an all-London final, not seen since 2002. Inter won 3-2 at Roma in their Coppa Italia tie, so look likely opponents of either Napoli or Lazio in the Final. Real Madrid and Barcelona will be the two teams in the Copa del Rey Final, which hasn’t actually happened since 1990. In Europe, Marseille face Real Madrid in the Champions League Quarter Final. Inter, who beat the home of their new manager, Valencia, play Arsenal, Bayern Munich play Barcelona and Liverpool play A.C. Milan. In the Europa League, Lars Tommersen’s Rangers play Stuttgart, AS Monaco play Atlético Madrid, Lazio play Roma in a Rome derby, and Olympiakos face Man City. Australia became the second side to qualify for the 2018 World Cup, alongside hosts and holders Spain, after they opened up a sufficient gap over Saudi Arabia in their qualification group. England won their latest game, 2-1 in Lithuania, while Northern Ireland lost 1-2 to Montenegro, Ireland lost 0-2 at home to the Czech Republic, Scotland drew 1-1 in Turkey and Saul Goode’s Wales pulled off a good 3-1 win in Poland, thanks to goals from Joe Ledley, Ched Evans and Sam Vokes. The next matches come in June.

So that’s that. I’ll leave you with this news which will prove of interest to Lawrence Lazewski. Reports are coming in that there has been a break through in the Manchester City takeover talks. According to the English Football Messenger, discussions between Man City chairman Khaldoon Al Mubarak and director Garry Cook are going well and there could be an announcement in the next few days. Lazewski, alongside Bryan McGuinness at rivals United and Neppo Monster at Conventry, is said to be ‘Under Pressure’.

Manager of the UpdateThere was a bit of a shortage of eligible managers for this award.

Ben Taylor, Fiorentina

for picking up maximum points in his two games. Taylor won both games, and while he didn’t play many, you can only win what’s put in front of you. Tom Smith also did well, picking up all but two of the points available this month and progressing in the Champions League, and Lucas Volman’s unlikely progression to the Copa del Rey Final is something to be admired.

Re: 60 to One

April has passed and the season is now winding down. Let’s look at how our managers did this month, and whether there might be any sackings around the corner.

We’ll start in England, where Tom Smith’s Arsenal have their fifth consecutive league title under wraps, and their seventh under the Portuguese manager. This month, the Gunners won three of their five games, drawing with Aston Villa and Everton, including a 4-1 win at Old Trafford, and that was all that was required to put the Premier League to bed. Now Smith can focus on his club’s Champions League campaign, which I’ll cover in detail later on. Meanwhile, Leo Dodge’s Tottenham need just one more point to ensure Champions League football next season, and with a home game against Leeds (coming after a trip to the Emirates), that should be possible. In April, Dodge and his team won five matches, with wins over Birmingham, Stoke, Newcastle, Man City and Liverpool but a loss to Chelsea. Elsewhere in England, Arsenal lost their FA Cup Semi Final to Chelsea 1-3. Valuable Scottish player John Fleck opened the scoring for the Pensioners in just the first minute, and Pablo de Barros made it 2-0 before half time. Two goals early on in the second half, one at each end, finished off the match goal-wise but there was plenty of action as Arsenal sought in vain for another goal. West Ham beat Liverpool on penalties so Chelsea will face the almost-relegated Hammers in the Final.

In European football, we saw the Champions League Quarter Finals this month. Real Madrid started with a 2-1 win at the Stade Vélodrome over Marseille, and followed that up with a 5-0 victory at home over the French. Meanwhile, Cool Manager’s Inter and Tom Smith’s Arsenal drew 1-1 in Italy, allowing the Gunners to swoop to victory in the return leg with a 4-1 win at the Emirates. A.C. Milan, like Real Madrid, won their first leg away, this time against Liverpool, and they knocked Mikey Twigge’s side out with a 3-2 victory at home, completing a 5-3 aggregate win. And Barcelona travelled to Munich, where they lost 0-2 to Bayern. Things were getting desperate when Bayern took the lead in the return leg in Spain. Barcelona equalised but then went behind again. A further three goals, however, while they won the match, were not enough to stop Haowan Madridstas’s side going out on away goals. Both the Semi Final First Legs ended in draws, 2-2 at the Emirates between Arsenal and Real Madrid, thanks to a late goal from Fernando Gago levelling the scores for Real and making them odds-on to reach their second consecutive final, and 1-1 in Germany between Bayern Munich and A.C. Milan. One thing is for sure; Barcelona’s run of eight consecutive Finals has come to an end thanks to Bayern Munich.

Of course we musn’t forget about Europe’s smaller competition, even though we don’t have any managers in it any longer. One of our former managers lost; Lars Tommersen’s Rangers going out 3-5 on aggregate to Stuttgart. Meanwhile, Atlético Madrid and Lazio both booked their places in the Europa League Semi Final with a 7-2 win over Monaco and a 2-1 win over Roma respectively. And in the battle between two of our former managers, Lawrence Lazewski triumphed when his Man City side knocked out Olympiakos 4-2 on aggregate. City are already bettering that in the Semi Final, winning the first leg 6-1 against Stuttgart. Atlético and Lazio drew 1-1 in Spain in the other Semi Final first leg.

Over to Spain now, where we’ll be watching to see if Barcelona can get Champions League football next year. But while we were doing that, Ben Cee’s Valencia crept ahead of Real Madrid in the race for the title! Winning five out of seven games this month, slightly better than Real’s four out of six, the former Inter boss guided his team to top of the table, but only by a point and having played a game more. Barcelona, meanwhile, opened up a five point gap over fifth place, which is now occupied by Racing, as Atlético Madrid fell away. Haowan Madridstas’s team beat Getafe, Mallorca, Alavés, Recreativo and Málaga before ending the month with a draw at Elche. With five games left the top four finish isn’t signed and sealed, but this month will not be unwelcome in the quest for it.

Do you remember that I told you about how in Italy, all our three teams are close together and challenging for the two remaining Champions League spots? Well, a sudden reversal in fortune means that Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina have plummeted down to 8th place and are virtually out of contention. The points totals in that area of the table are close, but not that close: Fiorentina can now finish 4th and no higher. Losses to Mantova, Brescia, A.C. Milan and Lazio this month, as well as a 0-5 home defeat to Udinese, were reprieved only by a 4-0 win over Theo Stigarakis’s Empoli, who currently sit 14th. Neither Udinese nor Napoli are confident of their top four finish yet, but they did a lot more this month to solidify it than Fiorentina did. Aside from their 5-0 victory over Taylor’s team, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese beat Modena, who have just been relegated, 2-1, Genoa 4-1, Empoli 4-0 and Atalanta 2-0, gaining fifteen points from a maximum of fifteen. Lord Weeman beat Brescia and Mantova, drew with Juventus and at Empoli and lost to Atalanta away. Not setting the world alight, but not combusting like Fiorentina, and overall a satisfactory month, although one that could be rued if that fourth placed finish is not achieved. On the plus side, Napoli beat Lazio 4-1 in the second leg of their Coppa Italia Semi Final, for a 5-3 aggregate which means a Final against Inter. When they got to the Final last year, Napoli suffered a penalty defeat against Inter’s cross-city rivals A.C., and they’ll be hoping for a better result this time around.

As the managers prepare to finish their ninth year in charge of their clubs, let’s see how their financial prospects have improved since then. Of course they have picked up plenty of earnings over their career, but it is a good indicator of their ability if we look at how much they are earning per week at the moment. All seven started off earning £10,000 a week, and Lucas Volman is the one to have moved up the most from that, increasing it 35-fold to accumulate a weekly income of £350,000. Other obscene earners are Tom Smith, who brings home weekly £210,000, and Haowan Madridstas, who pockets £140,000. The next highest earner is £91,000p/w further back: Leo Dodge on £49,000. Tyler Burrows earns the least, £28,500 each week, while Lord Weeman earns £43,000p/w and Ben Taylor £41,000. Of the managers who are at new clubs, Fréderico Canvey is the worst off and is actually earning less than the initial £10,000 he was taking home at Stoke. He’s now on a salary of £3,200p/w and joins four other former managers of ours in earning less than £10,000p/w (Neppo Monster at Coventry, £5,500; James Ridley at Crystal Palace, £6,250; Neilio at Ipswich, £6,500; Theo Stigarakias at Empoli, £8,750). The highest earner of our former managers is Tim Aubel, who is £500 worse off than Leo Dodge each week, taking home £48,500 each week. If you thought that was weird, Man City boss Lawrence Lazewski only earns £18,750 each week. Ben Cee at Valencia earns just £26,000 a week, and Cool Manager’s salary at Inter is only £29,500. The mean salary of our seven managers is £123,071 (Median £49,000), and of all our former and current managers £47,448 (Median £25,750).

Manager of the UpdateThis is a pretty easy award to give;

Tyler Burrows, Udinese

picks up his third award from the last five for having yet another strong month. He’s our lowest earner but that doesn’t give him an excuse for poor management, so he continues to inspire performances in his Udinese players. Leo Dodge was another name in the ring but he fell slightly short of the standard set by Burrows this month.

Re: 60 to One

Update 107Years: 8, Months: 107, Days: 3250

So season number nine has come to a close. Let’s see if any of our teams pulled off amazing feats at the death, and or if any of our teams bottled it.

We’ll start in Italy, where A.C. Milan put away the title this month, ending up eventually with a 12-point lead over second-placed Inter. Down the lower end, Lecce, Bologna and Modena went down to Serie B, to be replaced by Siena, Torino, and one of four other teams. Napoli and Udinese claimed the other two Champions League spots, while Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina recovered to claim a Europa League place. In May, Fiorentina beat Lecce, Sampdoria and Parma, although they lost 1-2 at home to Frosinone in their final game, but that was a loss that had no impact on their position. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese ended a good season with a poor final month: wins over Mantova and Lazio were good, but more important losses to Brescia and table neighbours Napoli were bad. As well as their victory over Udinese, Lord Weeman’s side beat Bologna and Palermo, although they lost 1-4 away to Roma on the final day. They also took part in the Coppa Italia Final.

Road to the Final – Coppa ItaliaLord Weeman’s Napoli began their campaign in the 1st Round, defeating Palermo 4-0. Up next came a home tie against Fiorentina; tricky, but overcome by a margin of one goal to nil. Cool Manager’s Inter also started in the 1st Round, beating Bologna 2-1. They then welcomed Udinese, and won by the same scoreline. Inter’s Semi Final was against Roma, and a 3-2 away win in the first leg stood them in good stead. A 2-2 draw at home was enough to put them into the Final. Napoli, meanwhile, lost their first leg 1-2 away to Lazio. But a 4-1 win at home in the second leg gave Weeman’s side their second consecutive Final.

Rome’s Olimpico, as always, was the host for the Final. The match was goalless up until and beyond half time, but Inter got the breakthrough they needed, and one against the run of play, in the 56th minute. Portuguese star Yannick Djaló was let in by a sloppy Napoli defence, who saw Daniel Carriço’s long ball forward fall to the 31-year-old. Djaló didn’t even have to deal with a goalkeeper, as Napoli’s was adrift in the box and offered no hope of getting to the ball. But all was not lost for Napoli, who got a goal back just five minutes before what would have been the final whistle. After several opporunities for Inter to clear and or tackle, Napoli’s Vittorio Mattioli took a shot, which deflected off Zdravko Kuzmanovic and in, and was given as an own goal. The deadlock wasn’t settled in extra time, so penalties would be needed. Inter went first, with attacking midfielder Tales scoring. Napoli levelled via Ivan Fatic, but Inter’s next shot was saved by Nicolás Navarro. Napoli went 2-1 ahead with Marek Hamsik’s kick, and both sides scored their third penalties. Inter levelled at 3-3 thanks to goalscorer Yannick Djaló, and then Éder cracked under the pressure, squandering Napoli’s lead when his limp shot was saved by Júlio César. Daniel Carriço scored for Inter, meaning Aleksander Kolarov had to score to keep Napoli in it. He did, and Napoli won back the advantage when Navarro saved Garry Bocaly’s ‘confident’ penalty. Choco scored to give Napoli the Italian Cup!

In other Cup news, Lawrence Lazewski’s Man City made the Europa League Final with a 1-1 draw in Stuttgart sending them through 7-2 on aggregate. Atlético Madrid and Lazio drew 0-0 in Italy which means that Lazio went through 1-1 on away goals. Unfortunately, it wasn’t to be for Lazewski, whose team lost 0-1 at Arnhem’s GelreDome, when Lazio’s 16-year-old Enrico Baldi, who plays in ther under 20s, scored a neat goal in the 26th minute. Just because you are dominating the game and just because he is 16, there is no reason to leave him unmarked and onside.

Man City finished their league campaign in 3rd place, which does mean they can have another crack at the Europa League, but they’d probably prefer to stay in the Champions League. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham lost 2-3 at the Emirates and then lost 0-1 at home to seventh-placed Leeds, meaning that they dropped like a rock out of the top four, and will only get Europa League football next season. Dodge is currently Insecure but I wouldn’t say he will go; if he was going he would surely be gone already. Arsenal, naturally, get into the Champions League alongside Man City, and Liverpool and Chelsea, and Aston Villa, Portsmouth and relegated West Ham join Spurs in the Europa League. The Hammers lost the FA Cup Final 0-3 to Chelsea, but still enter into Europe, playing Roma one week and Reading the next. Birmingham and Stoke join them, while Wigan, Leicester and James Ridley’s Crystal Palace replace those three teams in the Premier League next season. Ridley’s team won the Championship by securing one more point than the Latics. Neppo Monster’s Coventry finished 8th, while his former club Bolton finished 15th.

What seemed impossible was done in Spain this month: Ben Cee’s Valencia won La Liga, ending Barcelona and Real Madrid’s 12-year reign. The club have endured some difficulties in recent times, since the departure of Lawrence Lazewski, and recorded a low of 9th in the division. That finish led the board to choose Cee to replace José Mourinho, and two years later he has returned the crown to the Mestalla. In May, the Singaporean only won two of four matches, but Real Madrid’s inability to win more than one meant that Valencia’s work was sufficient. Lucas Volman beat Málaga, but drew with Villarreal and lost to both Barcelona and Zaragoza. Barcelona ensured Champions League football next season by finishing fourth, fending off Atlético Madrid with three wins out of five in May. Mallorca went down, sacking their manager in the process, and Fréderico Canvey’s Alavés also went down, but they kept theirs as he is still earning less than the tea lady. No, I’m kidding: Canvey earns in a week what the tea lady, Margérita, takes two or three months to earn. Deportivo also go down, with Valladolid being the only certainty at the moment for promotion. Murcia, Tenerife and Espanyol are competing for the other two promotion spots. As for Real Madrid, well they had two cup finals with which to console themselves.

Road to the Final – Copa del ReyLucas Volman’s side started their quest for the Spanish Cup way back in Round 4, when they beat Vecindario 12-1 on aggregate, including a 9-0 home victory. They then beat Getafe 2-1 at home, meaning a 0-0 away draw was good enough to reach the Quarter Finals. Their Final opponents, Barcelona, beat Eibar in the Fouth Round, 2-1 away and 4-0 at home, before knocking out Athletic de Bilbao 5-2 on aggregate in Round 5. Their Quarter Final came against Elche, whom they beat 2-0 at home before drawing 1-1 away. Real Madrid, meanwhile, knocked Villarreal out at the Quarter Final stage, winning 1-0 at home and drawing 1-1 away. They then drew 2-2 at home to Zaragoza in the first leg of their Semi Final, but still went through by virtue of a 1-0 away win. Barcelona made the Final by drawing 1-1 away to Atlético Madrid and winning 3-1 at home.

Valencia’s Nuevo Mestalla hosted the Final, welcoming close to 75,000 fans. Barcelona took the lead very early on through Lionel Messi, and kept that lead until half time. In the second half, a 15 minute spell of dominance saw the advantage turn to Real. The first goal came in minute 71, when Fernando Gago curled his shot into the net from long range. The second came in minute 85, when Mamadou Sakho made a run to head home Wesley Sneijder’s corner. With Barcelona unable to recover, Lucas Volman retained the Copa del Rey for the third successive year.

Road to the Final – Champions LeagueBayern Munich were drawn into Group G of the Champions League, alongside Sparta Prague, Dinamo Kiev and Chelsea. Jürgen Klinsmann’s team started with two wins, over Prague and in Ukraine, and then achieved a highly desirable 1-1 draw at Stamford Bridge. They won the return leg against Chelsea 2-1, before beating both Sparta Prague away and Dinamo Kiev at home 3-0 in their final two games. The Last 16 drew them against Zaragoza, where they lost 1-2 away but prevailed with a 3-1 home victory. Meanwhile, their opponents, Lucas Volman’s Real Madrid, swept through a group containing Galatasary, Saint Etienne and Sporting CP, winning all home matches conceding only one goal, and picking up five points from the away ties. Their Last 16 tie came against Hamburger SV, whom they beat with two 2-0 victories. They then met Marseille, who had pushed Barcelona into second place in their group, in the Quarter Finals, beating the French team 7-1 on aggregate including a 2-1 win at the tricky Stade Vélodrome.

Bayern Munich’s Quarter Final tie was against another Spanish side, Barcelona. Barça had reached the last eight finals, and even a 2-0 home win didn’t give Bayern fans much faith. But a 2-4 defeat at the Nou Camp sent the Germans through due to the precious away goals rule, to a tie against A.C. Milan. They struggled in the first leg in Germany, drawing 1-1 with the soon-to-be Serie A champions. But a miraculous 3-0 victory at the San Siro, where A.C. were a man down within 3 minutes, put Klinsmann’s side into the Final. They would meet Real Madrid, who overcame Tottenham in their Semi Final, drawing 2-2 at White Hart Lane and 0-0 at home to progress on away goals.

Istanbul’s Ali Sami Yen Sports Complex, otherwise known as the Türk Telekom Arena, hosted the Final, welcoming 52,646 fans into its echelons. They didn’t have to wait long for a goal, as Real Madrid scored after just eight minutes. Bayern captain Phillip Lahm’s defensive throw-in was given straight to Daniel Schwaab, who found Klaas-Jan Huntelaar in the box with ease. Huntelaar simply powered the ball into the goal for the lead. Six minutes later, Rafael Sóbis made it 2-0 with his header, Schwaab again the provider. Real Madrid kept possession well, and though they didn’t make loads of shots, this was a sign of their clinical efficiency, working the ball into better areas and getting the shots that counted. They frustrated Bayern, who ended up ending pretty much every move with a speculative shot from long range. Lucas Volman deservedly picked up his fourth Champions League.

So that’s another season under the belt, and one that ended well for Napoli, decently for Arsenal, Fiorentina, Udinese, Real Madrid and Barcelona, but disastrously for Tottenham. While all teams made some losses in terms of the ambitions they harboured at the end of last month, they all made some gains, except for Tottenham, who fell out of the top four and whose manager is the closest of ours to the sack for 16 updates – the one in danger there was Liam Ferguson, who did get his P45. Can Leo Dodge survive it?

Manager of the UpdateI was torn between two this month but I decided to opt for the one who won more titles.

Lucas Volman, Real Madrid

gets the award at the expense of Lord Weeman. Although he lost out on the La Liga title to Valencia, who themselves didn’t perform that well this month, I was impressed with Real Madrid when they won the Copa del Rey and the Champions League. Weeman got his Napoli team the Coppa Italia and Champions League football next season, but just loses out here.

What does a 60 to One manager do in his time off? Not a lot, as was seen this month. In fact, the only one of our managers to do anything football-related this month was Ben Taylor, who sold 18-year-old striker Antonio Palombo to Inter for £1.3M.

So instead we’ll focus on international football. Five more teams qualified this month for the 2018 World Cup in Spain. In Asia, Iran beat Vietnam 4-0, beat South Korea 2-1 and beat Oman 2-1 to book their place in the Finals, while South Korea topped their group by beating Japan 2-1 and Vietnam 3-0, despite that loss to the Iranians. In Australia’s group, and looking to join the Socceroos in Spain next year, Saudi Arabia beat China 3-1, beat Bahrain 3-0 and drew 2-2 with the Australians. Japan and China will play off, and the winner will face New Zealand in order to qualify.

In South America, Brazil won 3-0 in Venezuela this month, before beating Argentina 2-0 at home. This booked Muricy Ramalho’s team their place in the Finals, and Argentina also qualified, by virtue of a 4-2 victory over Peru. Chile and Uruguay also occupy the qualification spots, with Paraguay sitting in the Playoff place. Colombia, Ecuador and Peru are all also in with a shout of qualifying. In North America, no team has yet made sure of their ticket to Spain, but Mexico the final group halfway through the qualifying process. The United States and Trinidad and Tobago also sit in qualifying positions, with Canada occupying the Playoff place.

In Europe, we don’t have any qualifiers yet but we did have two games this month. Stuart Pearce’s England romped to a 1-0 win in the Faroe Islands, before doing slightly better, if such a thing were possible, by winning 3-0 in Skopje thanks to a Theo Walcott hattrick. Northern Ireland beat Iceland 3-0, before grabbing a legendary 1-0 win in Paris. Their neighbours the Republic of Ireland also won their second match 1-0, in Liechtenstein, but they lost their first, 1-3 away to Saul Goode’s Wales. Wales went on to lose 1-2 to the Czech Republic. The Welsh took the lead in the 9th minute but saw it slip away the game reached its finish. Scotland beat Moldova 4-1 at home before beating Armenia 2-0 in Yerevan. The biggest win came for the Netherlands, who beat Latvia 9-0 in Rotterdam, in a match that saw two penalties in two minutes, although the Dutch were already 7-0 up at that point. 30-year-old Ryan Babel, who plies his trade for Tottenham, got a hattrick and the man of the match award for his 10.0 rating. Meanwhile, Andorra, Luxembourg, the Faroe Islands, FYR Macedonia and Azerbaijan were all eliminated from qualifying, while Estonia, Cyprus, Kazakhstan and Belarus would have to rely on a playoff.

In the Premier League, Arsenal aren’t tipped to retain the title for the fifth year, but Lawrence Lazewski’s Man City are the favourites, although I’m sure that City optimism will evaporate as soon as the Gunners start romping away to victory, some time in October. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham are predicted to finish 5th, and that might not be such a bad prediction, after the incredible choke they suffered last season. Fortunately for James Ridley, his Crystal Palace side are believed to be capable of avoiding the drop: Leicester, Wigan and Neilio’s Ipswich are the sides that bookmakers things will go down. West Ham are the favourites for the Championship, with Stoke expected to follow them up. I can’t seem to find any record of West Ham being entered into the Europa League for being last year’s FA Cup Runner-Up, although I’m not sure if that will change.

In Italy, Cool Manager’s Inter are expected to finish second behind their rivals A.C. for the second year running. Napoli, Udinese and Fiorentina are all expected to finish in the same positions they did last year: 3rd, 4th and 8th respectively. Theo Stigarakis’s Empoli, Frosinone and Rimini are all expected to go down. Reggina are believed to be capable of recovering their top flight status; they are favourites for Serie B.

World Cup Qualfiying wasn’t the only international competition taking place in June. This month also saw the European u21 Championship, hosted in Poland. England qualified top out of a group of France, Ukraine and Poland, beating France 3-1, Poland 2-0 and Ukraine 1-0. They then prevailed in their Semi Final against Spain thanks to Lee Taylor’s goal in the 109th minute being the only one in the match. Taylor, in fact, plays in France for Le Mans, although he was born in Ipswich and came through the Tractor Boys’ youth setup. The English face a Final against France, who beat the Netherlands 1-0 in the other Semi Final. But the u21 Championships isn’t all! The Confederations Cup took place in Spain, where the hosts prevailed in their group, ahead of Mexico, Germany and China, who finished 2nd, 3rd and 4th respectively. England lost 0-2 to Argentina, beat New Zealand 2-1 and drew 2-2 with the Ivory Coast, and finished 3rd in their group. Spain beat the Ivory Coast 2-0 in the Semi Final while Argentina achieved the same scoreline against Mexico. Argentina and Spain will therefore contest the Final, probably at the Nou Camp.

So, the managers have had their month off. Now back to work! And there’s a new job for Sol Campbell, who was unveiled as the Watford boss this month. Sacked from Charlton last year, he’ll be looking forward to another chance to manage in London.

Manager of the UpdateWell, I’m going to be boring here and give this award to;

Ben Taylor, Fiorentina

for being the only manager, to my knowledge, to have moved this month. He made £1.3M selling a player to Inter, so gets this award.

July has passed and the new season is impending. There were a hatful of transfers, which is a nice generic term to use for transfers as it gives no real size of the amount of transfers, unless you know how big the hat is.

It is logical that we start with some transfers, so we’ll first look at those that took place in England this month. Leo Dodge made the biggest buy of our two managers there, but that was only £1.2M for Racing’s 33-year-old goalkeeper Falcón. Arsenal’s purchase this month cost them £900k; 22-year-old goalkeeper Martin Watson from Man United. And you know that Paraguayan goalkeeper I was talking about several times, César Ruiz Díaz? He joined his seventh club in three years by signing for Arsenal on £13,250p/w. Tottenham made two outgoing transfers; 17-year-old leftback Charlie Fagan joined Wolves for £300k and Michael Kightly joined Atlético Madrid for £2.8M. Most of the transfer action in England seemed to orientate around Man City or Middlesbrough, and there were quite a few sales out to Spanish clubs. City sold Emirati midfielder Saleh Al-Sharji, Steven Defour, Chinedu Obasi and Alfonso Blanco for a combined total of £48.75M. Other than the Al-Sharji transfer, the biggest transfer was the £16.5M sale of Gavin Brown from Newcastle to Chelsea. There, he joins fellow Scottish striker John Fleck.

There was also early European football this month. The first English, Spanish and Italian sides entered the Europa League in the Third Qualifying Round, where Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina won their first leg 2-0 in Elbasan, Albania, against KS Elbasani. Villarreal won 1-0 at NAC Breda and Tim Aubel’s Portsmouth won 4-0 at Trnava of Slovakia. Tottenham enter in the next round, while the first of our Champions League teams, Udinese and Barcelona, enter that in the Best Placed Third Qualifying Round in mid- to late-August.

Back to transfers, and over to Italy now. Lord Weeman’s Napoli bought Albin Ekdal from Chelsea for £11.75M this month, while Weeman also sent two players from the club to new homes. Lars Bender left for Palermo for £11M, and the Ekdal money was recouped with the £1.5M sale of Victor Moses to Blackburn. Tyler Burrows did a couple of little things, buying half of Frosinone’s talented 16-year-old striker Fabio Manzini for £1.3M, and selling Alessandro Tuia to Ascoli for £100k less. The biggest transfer of the month I’ll cover in the Spanish report, but other than that, Cool Manager brought Matías Fernández to the San Siro from Zaragoza for £15.5M. Also, Brazilian Willian went from A.C. Milan to Lazio for £12.75M. Another transfer this month was made by Sampdoria, who brought in Crystal Palace boss James Ridley to be their new manager. This was after Jürgen Klinsmann left the Bayern Munich post vacant by going to Germany. Sampdoria’s Pavel Nedved took the role, so the club bought Ridley for £975k. The 45-year-old does have experience of managing in Italy thanks to his 843-day spell at Siena, and one of his first acts is attempting to sign Steven Gerrard, eight years Ridley’s junior, after the Englishman was released from Liverpool by Mikey Twigge. Crystal Palace hired Valladolid’s Luis Enrique as a replacement.

I left you last month talking about two international finals. England won the Final of the u21 European Championship, with a 27th minute goal from Falkirk’s Josh Peake. Two other youth tournaments took place exclusively in July. The u20 World Cup took place in Nigeria, featuring 24 teams. 16 of these teams qualify from the Group Stage for the Last 16, where England beat the Netherlands 1-0, Japan beat Cape Verde 2-1, the United States beat Iran 2-0, Spain beat Turkey 2-0, South Korea beat Brazil on penalties, Uruguay beat Paraguay 3-2, Argentina beat Nigeria 1-0 and Mexico beat Croatia on penalties. In the Quarter Finals, England beat Japan 1-0, while Spain beat the United States 3-1, Uruguay beat South Korea 3-2 and Mexico beat Argentina 1-0. England then beat Spain 2-0 in their Semi Final, while Mexico also reached the Final by beating Uruguay 4-1. Mexico won the Final 1-0, while Spain beat Uruguay 2-0 to claim 3rd place. Eight teams took part in the u19 European Championship; Italy and Greece qualified from a group that also included Croatia and Portugal, and the Netherlands and England qualified ahead of Turkey and Slovakia. After their match with Italy ended 2-2, England proceeded to the Final on penalties (how bizarre), while a brace from Angelos Athanasiou sent Greece into the Final 2-0 over the Netherlands. England beat Greece 2-1 in the Final despite another Athanasiou goal. In senior fooball, Spain won the Confederations Cup with a 2-1 victory over Argentina. Mexico beat the Ivory Coast 3-1 to claim 3rd place.

In Spain, Ben Cee’s Valencia are expected to retain the La Liga title. That will be despite a fierce challenge from Real Madrid and Barcelona, who are tipped to finish 2nd and 3rd respectively. Hércules, Valladolid and Murcia are expected to be left contemplating LIGA adelante football next season. In transfers, Barcelona made a couple of moves this month while Lucas Volman’sReal Madrid made two sales. Barça brought in Man City’s Saleh Al-Sharji for £20M and their Alfonso Blanco for £3.5M. Real Madrid sold 30-year-old John Obi Mikel to A.C. Milan for £20M, and 34-year-old Álvaro Arbeloa to Elche for £475k. At Alavés, Fréderico Canvey was busy, selling six of his Basque players for a combined sum of £6.25M, and bringing in five players for £550k in total. The most exciting prospect is 19-year-old defensive midfielder Kepa Arroyo, who is excellent at tackling or taking set pieces. Alavés are predicted to finish 4th in Spain’s second tier, which would not give them promotion to the top flight. Espanyol are favourites to win the division.

So, not much time remains now before the new season kicks off. Could this be the season when seven become six or maybe even five? Tottenham ended last season with a disappointing choke, Barcelona only just achieved Champions League football and ended their spree of reaching the Final each year, and Fiorentina had an abominable penultimate month last season. Maybe even friendly Udinese, who are not without their blips each season, could lose patience with their manager.

Manager of the UpdateSome good fundraising this month leads me to give this award to;

Lucas Volman, Real Madrid

He spun up a £20.5M profit this month from two sales, both of ageing players. Volman did well to achieve £20M out of John Obi Mikel, who joined A.C. Milan. Lord Weeman also made a transfer profit, and Ben Taylor won his first competitive game of the season.

Okay, folkies, let’s get this season under way. Season number ten in 60 to One, and it all started with some exhibition matches to determine which team was better…last season’s league winner or last season’s cup winner.

The first of these was the English Community Shield, where Tom Smith’s Arsenal took on Pim Verbeek’s Chelsea at Wembley. Arsenal dominated the match, refereed by Howard Webb, but it took them a long time to make the breakthrough. In the end, Emmanuel Adebayor’s 89th minute goal was the only one in the match. The Italian Super Cup was also won 1-0, and Lord Weeman’s Napoli were unfortunate as they fell to A.C. Milan. In Spain, Ben Cee’s Valencia won the competition, losing 0-1 in the away leg to Real Madrid, but triumphing 2-0 at home to recover the trophy after nine years. There is also a European Super Cup to settle, and that will be done next month.

August also saw the end of the transfer window, and all the feeding frenzy that results from that. The biggest transfer of the month was that of Ivorian midfielder and striker Salomon Kalou, who went from Newcastle to Chelsea for £19M. Meanwhile, Tom Smith strengthened his Arsenal squad with the £13M signing of Fernando Gago from Real Madrid. Lord Weeman added Thiago Alcântara to his repertoire at Napoli, signing the 26-year-old from Racing for £7.75M. Meanwhile, Haowan Madridstas let Kaká leave Barcelona to join Lyon, for the princely sum of £2M. The Brazilian is one cap short of his 100th, so he may reach that next month in Brazil’s game against Peru, if he comes off the substitutes’ bench.

Time to get down to business then. Unfortunately, the only “business” this month took place in England, so that is the only place where I can do a league report. Ian Holloway’s Leeds lead the league (try saying that many times really quickly), level on points with Liverpool, after two games. Tom Smith’s Arsenal are slightly further back in fifth; they won one and drew one of their two games, and Leo Dodge’s Tottenham are in 14th. The Gunners started with a 1-0 win at home to Middlesbrough before drawing 1-1 at the City of Manchester Stadium. Tottenham drew 1-1 at Old Trafford before drawing goalless at home to Everton. Pre-season title favourites Man City are in 17th place; in addition to drawing with Arsenal, they lost 0-1 at Villa Park. Stoke, West Ham, Nottingham Forest and the two teams from Sheffield lead the Championship on seven points from nine, although the Hammers didn’t get their Europa League entry; it seems it went to the league. Let’s just say they didn’t apply for a Pro License at the start of the season.

So we had two sides entering into the Qualifying Stages of the Champions League. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona beat Bayer Leverkusen 2-1 at home, but went through with a 3-3 draw in Germany. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese were unlucky enough to draw Chelsea. They drew 1-1 at home, but lost 0-2 at Stamford Bridge, meaning they will have to enter the Europa League this season. Other sides to make it through this preliminary stage were Benfica, Bordeaux, Spartak Moscow, Red Star Belgrade, CFR Cluj, Basel, Standard Liège and MSK Zilina. That leaves us with four teams in the group stages; Barcelona are drawn alongside FC Groningen, Zenit St. Petersburg and Bayern Munich, Real Madrid are alongside Spartak Moscow, Inter and Basel, and Napoli and Arsenal are in the same group, with Bordeaux and Standard Liège. Meanwhile, two of our managers will clash, with dafuge’s Besiktas and Lawrence Lazewski’s Man City meeting. They’ll be vying for points, as will their groupmates Celtic and Red Star Belgrade.

The Europa League groups tage draw has not yet been made, but there were qualifying games of interest this month. Fiorentina came through the Third Qualifying Round by beating Elbasani 7-0, for a 9-0 win in total. Portsmouth and Villarreal also won, as did Olympiakos. Additional sides joined in the Fourth Qualifying Round, but I’ll cover all the English, Italian and Spanish sides. Martin Bojangles’s Aston Villa welcomed Beitar Jersualem to Villa Park, and then won 5-0. They won the away leg in Israel 4-0. Ben Taylor’sFiorentina hosted Levski Sofia, winning the first leg 8-0 and drawing the second 2-2. Juventus hosted Slovan Bratislava, winning 7-0 in Italy and 5-0 in Slovakia. Portsmouth also won 7-0 at home, against Suduva of Lithuania, and Tim Aubel’s side finished it off with a 6-1 win away. Roma won 5-0 at home against Dinamo Moscow, and lost 2-3 away, but proceeded 7-3. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham faced Honka, beating the Finns 4-0 at White Hart Lane and 3-0 in Finland. All three Spanish sides started away; Villarreal drew 0-0 in Tbilisi against Dinamo, but beat the Georgians 4-0 in Spain. Atlético Madrid beat Hearts 4-0 in Scotland and 4-0 at home, while Racing did exactly the same thing to Nice.

So there’s plenty to look forward to. Next month sees four Premier League games, five Serie A games, four La Liga games, the Carling Cup, European football, plus the chance for Europe to get its first side other than Spain qualified for the 2018 World Cup. At the moment, it’s looking likely that Iberian neighbours Portugal will get that honour. Roll on season 2017-18!

Manager of the UpdateIt’s difficult to give this one, as all our sides either haven’t started the season or have had stuttery starts.

Ben Taylor, Fiorentina

wins it for me with some good work in the Europa League. He beat one team 7-0 this month and one 8-0. Tom Smith was also under consideration, given how he won the Community Shield, and Leo Dodge cruised through his Europa League qualifying, but both made average starts to the league season, while Taylor hasn’t had his chance to shine yet in 2017-18.

So, the season is under way for real now. Let’s take a look at how our managers, and some selected others, did in September.

Leeds still lead the English Premier League (and the rain in Spain still falls mostly on the plain), with Chelsea trailing them in second place. The defending champions, Tom Smith’s Arsenal, sit marooned way back in 12th place. This month, the Gunners beat Liverpool and drew with Newcastle, but lost 0-3 at Stamford Bridge and 0-2 at home to Ian Holloway’s table-toppers. They did beat Huddersfield 1-0 away in the Carling Cup 3rd Round, but one more defeat and they will be level with the amount they accrued during the entirety of last season. Their North London rivals Tottenham are doing much better, sitting in 3rd place. Spurs started the month with a creditable 0-0 draw at Craven Cottage, before winning their next three games, 4-2 at home to Blackburn, 2-1 away to Hull and 3-1 at home to Leicester. Blackburn were also their Carling Cup opponents, and this time Spurs went one better, or Blackburn went one worse, with the final scoreline being 4-1. The Fourth Round sees Spurs travel to Goodison Park, while Arsenal will travel to face Neppo Monster’s Coventry. The tie of the round is Liverpool versus Chelsea at Anfield. Holders Portsmouth are already out, losing 0-1 at home to Newcastle in Round 3.

Spain veritably kicked off their season this month, and Valencia are the early table leaders. Real Madrid aren’t faring too badly after five games; they sit 4th, but Barcelona are floundering early on, in 12th place. Lucas Volman’s Real opened with two home draws, against Real Sociedad and Zaragoza. They beat Sevilla and Tenerife, forming the bread in a sandwich whose filling was a draw with Elche. But the 57-year-old Italian also won the UEFA Super Cup this month, beating Lazio 1-0 in Monaco after extra time. Haowan Madridstas’s Barça opened with a 2-0 home win over Recreativo, although a home match against Elche ended in the visitors winning 2-1. The Catalonians then drew away to Tenerife before losing 2-3 away to Valencia. A home match versus Málaga gives them a chance to get back on track next month.

So European football rolled into action this month. We’ll start with the little sister, the Europa League. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese were drawn into a group with Portsmouth, Anderlecht and Aris. Their first match was at home to Portsmouth, and they won 2-1. Meanwhile, their fellow Italians Fiorentina were drawn with Panathanaikos, Dnipro Dnipropetrovsk and FC Hansa Rostock, an easy group if I ever saw one. They won their first match, 5-0 in Germany against Rostock. Finally, Tottenham meet Dortmund, Stade Rennais F.C. and APOEL Nicosia in their group. Their first match was also in Germany, and they won 3-0. In the Champions League, Barcelona won their first game, beating last year’s finalists Bayern Munich 3-0 at home. Man City also won 3-0, at home to dafuge’s Besiktas, while holders Real Madrid lost 1-3 away to Cool Manager’s Inter. Arsenal and Napoli met in Italy, and Tom Smith’s side won by a single goal scored by Henri Saivet in the 25th minute.

As for Napoli’s league campaign, it hasn’t started too well. They opened with a draw at home to Udinese; not too bad a result considering Tyler Burrows’s team now top the league, before beating Frosinone 3-1 away. They then drew at home to Mantova, lost away to Parma, and drew goalless against both Palermo and Roma. Udinese, of course, are having a much better time, although their month wasn’t perfect. Goalless draws came at both Napoli and Lazio, although all other games were won: at home to Empoli, away to Siena, at home to Fiorentina and away to Sampdoria. Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina side only lost the one game in September, although they sit 9th. They beat Frosinone and Torino, and drew with Sampdoria.

Mexico, the United States and Uruguay joined this month the list of nations who will compete in next year’s World Cup. Uruguay beat Bolivia (against whom Kaká did indeed get his 100th cap) and Colombia to book their place. Meanwhile, Chile picked up one point from the available six but still are guaranteed to finish in the playoff or higher. Paraguay currently occupy that position, and Colombia are the only other team in with a shout of qualifying. In North America, the United States beat Canada 4-0 and Guatemala 5-1, while Mexico beat Trinidad and Tobago 4-0 and Costa Rica 1-0.

And over in Europe, we do not yet have any teams in the Finals. As for the home nations this month, Stuart Pearce’s England lost 0-1 in Switzerland before beating Lithuania 3-0 at Wembley. They currently sit second in their group behind Ukraine, one point ahead of the Swiss. Scotland drew 2-2 at home to Slovenia, before beating Bosnia & Herzegovina 4-0 in Sarajevo. George Burley’s team lead their group, staving off the challenge of Turkey on goal difference. Northern Ireland drew 2-2 in Greece, before drawing 1-1 at home to Montenegro. Unfortunately for them, since France won both their games, they are currently second in their group. And finally, Wales and the Republic of Ireland share the same group, and the Irish beat Poland 2-0 in Dublin while the Welsh were losing 0-1 in Kazakhstan. Then the Irish welcomed Kazakhstan to Dublin and won 2-0, although Saul Goode’s Welsh team also won 2-0, away to Liechtenstein. They are both left trailing in the wake of the Czech Republic, and it looks probable that they will have to compete for the playoff place against each other. The biggest wins of the round were Italy’s 6-0 victory over Bulgaria, and Ukraine’s 6-0 win over FYR Macedonia.

Next month brings four Premier League games, four Serie A games, four La Liga games, some Copa del Rey games, two Champions League games, two Europa League games and two World Cup Qualifying games. You won’t want to miss it!

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award goes to;

Leo Dodge, Tottenham

at the expense of Tyler Burrows. Dodge guided his team to some nice wins in the Premier League, as well as victories in the Carling Cup and the Europa League. Burrows, meanwhile, took his team to the top of Serie with some strong league performances, and won in the Europa League. Dodge just edges this by virtue of the fact he got three wins from four games; Burrows got four from six.

We’ll start October’s update in Spain, where Valencia lead La Liga. They have lost just one game in their campaign so far, at home to third-placed Getafe. Haowan Madridstas’s Barcelona are fourth, and this month they won all four of their matches, including a 3-0 victory away to Betis. They also competed in the Copa del Rey, winning the first leg of their Fourth Round tie 6-1 away to Badalona. Real Madrid, meanwhile, won two out of three this month and sit 5th. They beat Recreativo and Sporting but were held goalless at Málaga.

Chelsea, who have enjoyed a return to some success in recent years under Pim Verbeek’s management, currently top the Premier League, with high-fliers Leeds dropping down to 6th and now without a manager. Portsmouth are in 16th place, and after a 0-3 defeat at the Emirates at the end of the month, the board decided to dispense with the services of Tim Aubel, and hire Leeds’ Ian Holloway instead. Aubel was just 10 days short of his 1705-day spell at Fulham. In other English club news, Guðjón Þórðarson left League 1 Charlton this month to take up a job with the Iceland national team. As for our clubs, Tom Smith’s Arsenal are currently 5th in the Premier League, just three points behind the Pensioners at the top. As well as that Portsmouth victory, they beat Sunderland and Man United this month, the latter 5-0, yet were held 1-1 at the DW Stadium. Still, it is a marked improvement from last month. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham are 10th; they lost their first match this month, 0-2 at the City of Manchester Stadium. They also drew away to both Ipswich and Aston Villa.

Of course there was more European football this month. In the Champions League, Real Madrid beat Spartak Moscow 4-0 at home before winning 1-0 in Basel. Arsenal beat Bordeaux 3-0 in London, and matched that score in Liège against Standard, in a ground where Napoli had drawn 2-2 in their last game. Lord Weeman’s side got another draw in France against Bordeaux. Barcelona drew 2-2 away to FC Groningen, but beat Zenit St. Petersburg 7-0 at home thanks to four goals from Lionel Messi. In the Europa League, Udinese won 3-0 at Anderlecht before winning 2-1 away to Aris Thessaloniki. Fiorentina also played a Greek side, beating Panathanaikos 2-0 at home, before drawing 1-1 in Ukraine against Dnipro. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham beat Stade Rennais 4-2 at home, before winning 4-0 in Cyprus against APOEL Nicosia.

Many, many more sides qualified for next year’s World Cup this month, so we’ll go through the continents in turn. Europe has now finished its qualification process but for the playoffs, and this month, England beat Ukraine 3-1 before beating the Faroe Islands 7-0, both at Wembley. This sealed their qualification for the tournament, finishing in 1st place in their group. Scotland won 2-0 in Moldova, before beating challengers Turkey 2-1 at home. This meant they too entered the World Cup automatically, with Turkey having to go through the playoff. Northern Ireland beat San Marino 5-0, but lost 1-3 away to Guðjón Þórðarson’s Iceland (Þórðarson had been in charge for two days). This meant that France raced away to qualification, and though Northern Ireland finished 2nd, they did not rank in the top eight second-placed teams. In the group containing Wales and the Republic of Ireland, the crunch match between the two came this month, in Dublin. Saul Goode’s side won that 3-2, and they went on to beat Poland 2-1 while Ireland lost by that scoreline in the Czech Republic. This did of course mean that the Czechs qualified first but that Wales would get their opportunity in the Playoffs. In the other groups, Norway pipped the Netherlands to first place in Group 1, Italy qualified ahead of Denmark by virtue of their superior goal difference, thanks to wins such as the 12-0 one over Luxembourg in the final match. Belgium qualified from Group 5, leaving Croatia in the Playoffs and Russia out entirely, Germany won Group 8, where Romania make the Playoffs, and Portugal finished 1st ahead of Israel thanks to a better goal difference. The playoff sees the Netherlands against Ukraine, Turkey against Israel in what has already been described as a ‘West Middle East thriller’, Romania against Croatia and Denmark against Wales.

Paraguay grabbed that last qualification place in South America, and Chile finished in the Playoff place. Their opponents will be Guatemala, after Costa Rica finished in the qualification spots and Canada fell away. I’ll be in the Guatemala camp, hoping they can compete in their first ever World Cup. Meanwhile, Japan drew 2-2 in China before beating the Chinese 3-1 at home, so it is they that get to proceed to face New Zealand in the playoff. And in Africa, Ghana qualified ahead of Senegal, Algeria and Benin, Egypt qualified ahead of Guinea, Angola and Namibia, Nigeria qualified ahead of DR Congo, Morocco and Libya, the Ivory Coast qualified ahead of Tunisia, Mali and Zimbabwe, and Cameroon qualified ahead of Togo, Gabon and the Republic of the Congo.

Logically, we’ll conclude in Italy, where Inter now lead Serie A. Tyler Burrows’s Udinese have now dropped to fourth, but they are doing a good deal better than our other Italian teams. This month, the Andorran guided his team to draws away to A.C. Milan and at home to Brescia, and beat Torino 3-0 at home. Lord Weeman’s Napoli are eleventh, having lost one and won two this month, including a 1-0 victory over Mikael Schøler’s Juventus, and Fiorentina are twelfth, winning once, drawing once and losing three times this month. They suffered bad defeats away to A.C. Milan and Palermo, and an unfortunate 0-1 loss at home to Roma. Meanwhile, the draw for the Coppa Italia First Round, which takes place in a couple of months’ time, was announced. Napoli host Brescia, Udinese host Palermo and Fiorentina host Atalanta.

So one of our former managers left their new job this month, and one of our current managers could easily leave theirs. It’s clear that none of them are living up to the high standards they have set themselves, at the moment, and it could be a sad, sad tale if things don’t start to improve. I don’t wish to fearmonger, but RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award is now officially the property of;

Haowan Madridstas, Barcelona

after he won it fair and square. Although there was a blip with a draw in the Champions League, an impressive 7-0 victory over Zenit St. Petersburg and a 6-1 win over Badalona, as well as twelve points from twelve in the league give him this award. Tom Smith was the one to miss out, after he got ten points from twelve in the league and won both Champions League games 3-0.

So, we’re into December and some of our managers are teetering on the edge of a sacking. They’re not gone yet, but could go in the coming month. But before we come to that, let’s take a look at their performances in December, starting with the English Premier League.

Said Premier League has a very unusual leader…Hull. Alan Irvine’s team have picked up 29 points from 14 games so far, two more than chasers Chelsea, although the Pensioners have played one game fewer. The defending champions, meanwhile, are back in 3rd place, and while Hull’s challenge is likely to be ephemeral, Tom Smith’s Arsenal will need to fight off Chelsea if they intend on winning the Premier League again. Smith isn’t one of our managers in trouble, and he probably wouldn’t be even if he didn’t have a large salary protecting him, but it’s the glory he’s after, and he won’t get that with a 3rd placed finish after so many title wins. In November, the Gunners could only win two of their four league games, against Fulham and Blackburn. Smith also received criticism from fans when his trip to the Ricoh Arena to face Neppo Monster’s Coventry in the Carling Cup Fourth Round ended only in a 2-0 win. He faces Fulham in the next round, against whom he has a strong record, so is looking forward to a Semi Final place.

Meanwhile, Arsenal’s North London rivals Tottenham are down in 9th place. Their manager, Leo Dodge, is on our endangered species list, although he has had a good month this month. It started with a 2-1 win over visiting Arsenal, one of those two failures to win this month (the other was a draw). Draws came against Liverpool and Leeds, a defeat came against Chelsea and a 3-0 victory came over bottom-placed Crystal Palace. A 2-2 draw at Goodison Park in the Carling Cup saw them out on penalties in the Fourth Round. Liverpool won that big match, 3-1 against Chelsea, and they will face Aston Villa away in the next round. Other ties are Sunderland versus Everton and Crystal Palace versus West Ham. In other English news, Leeds appointed a replacement manager, becoming Brettney Joven’s third club. Bryan McGuinness, who had developed a reputation of long stays at clubs, was sacked by Man United after less than a year in charge. The Red Devils now have Mike Phelan in charge as a Caretaker.

Over in Italy, there isn’t such a bizarre league leader. Cool Manager’s Inter are top, level on points with Juventus, and they have already opened up a six point lead over the holders and their rivals, A.C. Milan. As for our teams, they are all doing rather badly, although not all three managers are on the danger list. We’ll move in descending order, and so start with Udinese, who are 8th. Tyler Burrows, who bought another Ilfedons Lima calendar for this Christmas, was unable to win a game in November. Two points were garnered against Frosinone and Mantova, but the team lost 2-3 away to Palermo. Burrows should be okay, although this was a month where he will have surely targeted nine points, or seven at least. Two places lower down are Lord Weeman’s Napoli. His job is in danger, although he was unbeaten in November. Atalanta were beaten 1-0, Rimini 3-0, although Brescia held them goalless. Not a bad month, but not one considered good for a team chasing a Champions League spot. And in 12th place are Ben Taylor’s Fiorentina. They drew two games this month, against Genoa and Inter, and lost the third 1-2 to Juventus.

So we saw two more Champions League games this month, and as such, most of the qualification places are sorted. Barcelona won 4-3 in Russia against Zenit St. Petersburg, before losing 1-4 in Germany to Bayern Munich. They have qualified, although their next game will determine whether it is in first place. In Group G, Real Madrid haven’t yet qualified. They drew both games 1-1 this month, at home to both Basel and Inter, and if they lose away to Spartak Moscow, their defence of the tournament will end. In Group H, Arsenal won both games, 4-1 over Standard Liège and 2-1 over Napoli, both at home, while Napoli also drew 1-1 at home to Bordeaux. This puts Arsenal and Bordeaux into the next round, with Napoli hosting Standard in order to grab the Europa League place. Just one game was played in the Europa League this month. Udinese lost 0-2 at Fratton Park, Tottenham beat Dortmund 3-0 at home, and have qualified for the next round, and Fiorentina beat Rostock 5-1 at home.

Atlético Madrid lead La Liga, with their rivals Real Madrid six points further back in 3rd. This month, Lucas Volman’s side won two and lost one, with the loss coming away to the league leaders, although one of the wins came at home to second-placed Valencia. Real also completed a 10-1 aggregate cup win with a 6-0 home victory over Real Unión. Barcelona are in fifth place, and they won one and lost two this month, with Atlético Madrid and Hércules being the teams to conquer them. However, they did beat Badalona 8-0 at home to record a 14-1 aggregate victory in the Copa del Rey.

So, there were a few final World Cup places to be decided. In Europe, Denmark beat Saul Goode’s Wales 2-1 in Copenhagen, thanks to two goals from Nicklas Bendtner, leaving the Welsh with every opportunity to qualify. The Netherlands beat Ukraine 1-0, Romania beat Croatia 3-1, and Turkey beat Israel 3-0, with all the winning teams being at home. In the second legs, Wales were undone, crashing to a 0-3 defeat in Cardiff. Ukraine drew 1-1, meaning that the Netherlands qualified 2-1 on aggregate. Israel lost 0-1 to Turkey for a 0-4 aggregate defeat, and Croatia’s 2-1 victory was not enough to overcame Romania, who won 4-3. Japan won the Asia/Oceania playoff, beating New Zealand 4-1 away and 2-0 at home. And unsurprisingly, Guatemala lost to Chile in the Americas playoff, being beaten 0-3 at home and 0-2 away. The draw for the Finals gets made next month.

So, after 650 days, we have some managers teetering on the edge of the brink. Who knows whether or not they will be fired next month? And by the way, Leo Dodge was definitely Insecure when I started writing this update, but it seems he is now Stable.

Manager of the UpdateThis month’s award goes to;

Tom Smith, Arsenal

for basically being the best of the worst. Wins in the Champions League and Carling Cup and only one defeat in the league give him this award.

This month was replete with sackings, and I am bursting with excitement just waiting to tell you all about them. As there were so many managers fired this month, I’ll deal with them in turn, and then talk about the managers still in their jobs. Only one of the managers who went was still in 60 to One, but plenty of our former managers have now left their newly-adopted clubs.

Phil Brown was the first to go, from his post at Bristol City. He was replaced by Lee Clark. The first of our managers to go was Ben Taylor, who was dismissed from his job the day after Brown was from his. After 3442 days of service, the Englishman was removed from his post after he started December with a win over Atalanta but only a draw away to Rimini. He had also beaten Panathanaikos 3-1 in Greece, and so confirmed Europa League progression, but with his side 12th in Serie A, four places below their expected position, Taylor was given his marching orders by the board. Fiorentina appointed Luigi di Canio, who had days earlier been sacked from Atalanta, as their new manager. Atalanta hired Luigi Del Neri.

The next manager to go was Mikey Twigge. After putting in a 941-day long shift at Liverpool, with his side 10th in the Premier League and after a humiliating 1-4 defeat away to Aston Villa in the Carling Cup Quarter Final. This was after a 0-1 home loss to Fulham and a 2-2 draw at Ewood Park this month, but the sacking still came out of the blue. Liverpool hired Rafa Benítez, back for his third crack at the job. Next, AlbinoLeffe sacked Daniele Fortunato, replacing him with Elio Gustinetti, and Reggina sacked Walter Mazzari, replacing him with Franco Colomba. Bolton sacked Alan Pardew, opting instead for Phil Brown, and Villarreal sacked Michael Laudrup, replacing him with Athletic’s Jesús Ramírez. That left the Basque club’s manager role vacant, so Theo Stigarakis took the opportunity to move from Italy to Spain, taking up the role to the £1M benefit of Empoli.

So those are the sackings. We’ll start the rest of the report in England, where Chelsea lead the Premier League. Liverpool have recuperated to climb to 4th under their new management, which means that Tom Smith’s Arsenal are 5th. Their month was about average for the position they currently occupy, but bad for a title chaser. They started with a 3-0 victory over then-leaders Hull, followed by a Carling Cup victory at home to Fulham, 1-0. That, however, was succeeded by a 0-2 defeat away to Leicester, although winning ways were found again in the next game, a 3-2 victory over Neilio’s Ipswich. A draw came away to Crystal Palace, a win at home to Aston Villa, and a draw away to Middlesbrough. Leo Dodge’s Tottenham are 8th; the manager is currently Stable but got a little too close to the sack for comfort this month. A 0-3 defeat at St James’ Park was fortunately followed by three consecutive victories, including a 4-1 win at Wigan. The month ended with a 1-1 draw at home to Man United, who currently sit 11th.

Atlético Madrid still lead La Liga, and a five point gap has opened between them and second-placed Valencia. Real Madrid are three points further back and Barcelona four points beyond that. This month, Lucas Volman’s Los Galácticos won three of their four games, being held at home to Hércules, Barcelona’s conquerors. They also started competion in the Club World Cup, beating Enyimba, of the host nation Nigeria, 5-0 in the Semi Final. Bizarrely, they had to travel back for their home game against Villarreal before they play the Final next month. Barcelona, under the management of Haowan Madridstas, won three and lost one this month. They beat Villarreal, Murcia and Valladolid by a combined scoreline of 12-1. But a trip to Zaragoza resulted in a 1-3 defeat.

Inter still lead Serie A, but the best news is Napoli’s climb back up to contention. Lord Weeman’s side now sit 4th, after winning all four games this month. A narrow 4-3 win away to Empoli was followed by a 5-0 victory at home to Siena, a 4-1 win at Fiorentina and a 2-1 home win over Lazio. They also competed in the Coppa Italia First Round, beating Brescia 3-0. Meanwhile, Tyler Burrows’s Udinese are 9th, after suffering a poor month. They beat both Palermo and Genoa 1-0, but lost 0-4 away to Inter. They also crashed out of the Coppa Italia, losing 1-2 at home to Palermo. Palermo are to be Napoli’s Quarter Final opponents.

We’ll conclude the report with updates on teams’ European antics. Barcelona beat FC Groningen 3-0, Arsenal beat Bordeaux 3-0, Napoli beat Standard Liège 3-1. Real Madrid won 3-0 in Moscow against Spartak, so the holders can continue into the next round of the Champions League. Monaco, Zenit St. Petersburg, dafuge’s Besiktas, Lille, Dinamo Kiev, Salzburg, Spartak Moscow and Napoli all enter the Europa League; CFR Cluj, FC Groningen, Red Star Belgrade, AEK Athens, MSK Zilina, PSV Eindhoven, Basel and Standard Liège all end their European participation. In the Round of 16, Haowan Madridstas meets Tom Smith as Barcelona take on Arsenal. And Real Madrid face a potentially tricky tie against Man City. The tie of the round, other than Barcelona versus Arsenal, is A.C. Milan against last year’s finalists Bayern Munich. In the Europa League, two games were played this month. Udinese beat Anderlecht 2-0 and Aris Thessaloniki 3-0, both at home, sealing their qualification for the next round behind Portsmouth. Tottenham won 2-0 in France against Stade Rennais, and 4-0 in England against APOEL Nicosia. Spurs’ Round of 32 opponents will be Champions League dropouts Salzburg, while Udinese face Villarreal and Napoli play Racing. Udinese would then face CSKA Moscow or Lyon, Napoli would face Panathanaikos or Roma, and Tottenham would face AZ Alkmaar or Juventus.

So we are now down to six. None of our managers are in trouble at the moment, and there’s a good chance we’ll make it through the season without another sacking. But the blood is in the water, and there’s also the chance of a feeding frenzy.

Manager of the UpdateThis month, it has to be;

Lord Weeman, Napoli

after he won every single game, taking his side to 4th in Serie A in the process. Lucas Volman wasn’t too far off, being the only other manager not to lose a game, and credit should be given to Leo Dodge for bouncing back from a heavy defeat to have a successful month.