im having a mixed episode?

i was first diagnosed with depression 11 years ago at 16. then, when i was 24, they said it was bipolar 2 disorder. Im 27 now. im not sure but i think im having a mixed episode. i have every single symptoms of mania and most of the depression, but its mixed and im confused. my brain is cloudy

im scared to go to sleep because last night my brain had a shock in it when i would close my eyes. i question my sanity when i say that....it makes me wonder if i could be having a pyschotic episode. im starting to be deluisional? No, no I cant be because I really felt that shock 2 times. it was real

I havent been taking my antipyschotic risperdal because i hate it. it makes me fat and i cant wake up. it makes me dizzy. and they keep putting me on anti depressants and want me to take an antipyschotic.

well why cant i get a mood stablizer? ive had depokote before and i hated that too. they dont give me much options. They gave me 20 .5 mgs of xanax this month- mind you- ive been off of xanax for years until i needed it last month. and my 20 are gone... and i panic all the time! they wont give me alot at a time anymore because 3 years ago- when my life was at its worst, i took too many and ended up in the pysch ward.

I also need a job, No one hires me because I have no experience and they wont give me a chance, and when i was younger...i messed up my chances. I cant get on disability because i tried and was denied, only to wait 28 months to miss my appeal because i got a job afew days before and "didnt need it"

is this a mixed episode? i havent been able to sleep for about 4 days and i am depressed and dont want to shower or brush my hair, well i do shower but i force myself and brushing my hair takes too long.

You certainly sound all over the place, a bit like i do when I'm off the planet. I don't know if I officially have mixed episodes because my dr has never told me much more than that I have BP, but there are times when I can tick just about every box. I would suggest talk to your doctor, and anyone else you have helping you.

I understand what you are going through. I haven’t been able to sleep in the last two weeks. The head zaps could be the anxiety but check with your doctor. I hate the highs and lows but I keep telling my self that it will pass and better day are ahead of us.

It does sound like a mixed episode, meds out of whack need to talk to doc. When forget or just don't take a drug for a few days I get electric shocks in my brain too, It feels like a disconnect in my brain. When I go off an antidepressant my whole body will wake in a shock from head to toe. It's awful thats the reason we wean off. Lack of sleep can cause pscosis delusions ,sleep is something you need to talk to your doc about now. 4 days is way too long. I've been where you are theygave me seroqeul at night.