Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Married life is simple when you know and you want to make it heavenly. But if you choose to be selfish and wants your spouse to cater to your every need, love you unconditionaly and give in to your every whim n fancy, then its going to be a disaster right from the start. I'm not being clever and know all but for the last 23 years I've used this pull n push, give and take method.

I am a super ego person to start with, who will want to get my way all the time. Talkative - non stop,my heart is ruled by my emotion, I have a very very strong intuition ( if I say MU will loose the game then 80% its going to be true.I TRULY DO NOT KNOW Y !!!...Pak Aji will jeleng me and say "Ibu, pls don't say it !!! " hahahaahah) I make first impression judgement ussualy its correct....emmmm ( P/s: But my super ego has diminish to 50% after 23 years. Thanks to my laling)

My other half is a quite person and its difficult to see him angry n be spiteful to anyone. A romantic~flower, chocolate etc. A pious man ( I learn Islam teachings, memorizes surah, listen to his jumaat khutbah, ceramahs n fardu Ain from him) He is my Ustad...Alhamdulillah. Its always I who blows my top with the kids. I am the disciplinarian in the family. No matter how hard I 'rotan' them, they''ll be no trace but if he canes them 100% sure , they will start having fever n the rotan trace is red n swollen !!?? So he stops caning a long time ago....

But if its his turn to 'megamok' ( alaaaa.... compared to my tantrums, his is like spray of water je !!!) I will keep quite and let him finish his anger then I will cool him down with his favourite drink. Then I will slowly ask him why ? Shower him with 7 star treatment...... I motivate him and we share stories. I can never do anything bad because when I see his face, all the day happenings will pour out like rain water !!!! heheheeh .No secret withheld ...BAHAYA~~~~ DANGER... This I don't advice (part about no secret la)... heheheeheheh

Be a giver not a taker. Be a appreciative hubby or wife. Show them how much you love him or her then only he will show back in return. Let it be an example to your kids so that they'll know that its acceptable to show love in the house.They will do it in their home later. A house with love is a house made in heaven. Have 'together' time , no kids allowed. At least once a week, pick a day and go out n do your things with out kids. Go for holidays , it does not have to be far. Choose somewhere near by and you do not have to take a long leave from work. Loosen up there and communicate more.

What you don't say and share is 'cancerous' to your marriage. Make it a point to give a peck on the cheek or forehead before going to bed, waking up, before going to the office, before breakfast lunch , or dinner ; its your way of saying thanks to your wife after a good meal. She cook for you and its a way of appreaciating her. When you see something that you know she is fond of, just buy to surprise her. The art of surprising is a sure bet to make anybody happy n loved !!! I advice you to do this often. What is a few bucks when you can see the smile on your partner's face the whole day thru.............

Don't be a 'HJ BAKHIL' not in financial aspect but everything; show your love, don't be a judgmental freak, accept him or her as what she or he is. Don't expect them to change in a flash for you. Start educating them slowly and lovingly. It works as time pass on. Say nice n loving words. Don't be spiteful, its not vogue to let those ugly words come out of our mouth especially us ladies !! Even if he has done something unacceptable to you. Sit down and talk about it. Let him explain first then you judge him and decide the next course of action. Then only you are fair to him or her. We are created to have love in abundance, so let go and start being what we are made of !!! You're the chosen one for your other half and him or her for you, so make it a worth while investment my friends.....

MOTHERS take note !!! Please teach your son to be a loving husband to be. Appreciate woman especially your wife. I have 4 boys and I train them to do house work, cook heavenly rice and they are well verse in the kitchen, ironing my tudung, cooking simple food n d art of cleaning up after using anything. So I have 4 very well train husband to be !!! heheheeh. The dowry shall be high, like the hindustani ya..... Women give dowry and man wait to be ask for the hand in marriage. Any takers ?? HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

I'm not a Guru in married life. I am too a learner in the art of happy living but its a fool proof theory if you give love.You'll get more love coming your way. It doesn't cost u a single cent to make life bearable till the day you die. So why not invest ?? You choose to be miserable or happy ?

Last but not least COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE,COMMUNICATE... Let your feeling show. You are one with each other, if you feel the pain , he'll feel it too. COMPLIMENT each other n SUPPORT each other in sickness, in health and in wealth. If you have done all of this , then you will never go wrong. Smooth sail my friend..........

LIFE IS SHORT, WHY DO YOU NEED TO MAKE LIFE MISERABLE WHEN YOU CAN BE A HAPPY BIRD CHIPPING ALL THE WAY TO HEAVEN.......~~ SALUTE FROM AWIN