I like the 'Parent Effectiveness Training'. It focuses on not making any assumptions on why your kid is acting like whatever way or saying certain things. Teaches you to really hear them
so that they want to talk to you.

I loathed this. For us it was so very disconnecting and our son hated when we spoke to him using the methods.

Ds: playing with a zebra in the sandbox
Me: "your really busy!"
Ds: bouncing the zebra up and down
Me: "you are bouncing that high!"
Ds: looks at me and says "why are you talking like that? Stop it"
Me: "cool. Are you having fun with the zebra?"
Ds: "yep!"