Joe Biden has become problematic. Yes, him too. In a convergence of the tribalistic crazy that has infected our politics, the former vice president has managed to find himself a target of hungry, outraged opportunists across the spectrum who have had just about enough of his hair sniffing. Defenders of an unapologetic serial sexual assaulter, and the pussy-grabber-in-chief himself, spent last week gleefully pretending that they thought Biden was the real creep. And certain socialist-curious Democrats were quick to call the Cancel Cops, obviously hoping that the fallout would knock Biden off his perch atop the Democratic primary polls. But here's the thing about these critics, left and right: Vanishingly few of them seem to sincerely believe that Biden's enthusiastic shoulder rubbing would inhibit him from being a successful president.

Their real complaints with him are along much different vectors: That he is a "neoliberal capitalist" (the Bernie bros); or that there are women or people of color who are better options (intersectional progressives); or that he's a liberal who needs to be owned (Trump supporters).