"The Day the Penguin Died"

Gotham City and the Cobblepots. Oh sure, we all got off on the wrong foot a bit, what with my ancestor Sir Nigel Cobblepot being part of the invading British Redcoats during our fight for independence. And yet it would only take a couple of generations for us to make things "right" with the fair city, as the Union Army's Col. Nathan Cobblepot admirably defended Gotham during the legendary Battle of Gotham Heights. If truth be told, in time the Cobblepot name would eventually become synonymous with Gotham. So much so that Theodore Cobblepot, my great-grandfather, would enjoy one of the longest and most succesful tenures as Mayor this city ever had. Yes, Gotham and we Cobblepots have shared quite the long and prestigious history together... if you don't include me, of course. Awkward. Skittish. Friendless. Freakish. I was everything a Cobblepot was not supposed to be. And so, I would have to make my own way in life. There'd be no mayoral reigns or famous war victories for this Cobblepot. NoNo, I would have a life filled with museum thefts and clashes with masked vigilantes to look forward to instead. A life as The Penguin. And so it went. But whatever can be said about my life, even my bitterest foes must grant me this: I've always conducted myself with style. With class. And with dignity. And so it shall remain. No matter what my situation is now.

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