Dance

You know how it is, girls just wanna have fun. They like pop music and that pointless up-beat shit. I can’t really be mad at that though. Some of it actually takes me away from my usual deep state of conscious realization of how fucked up everyone/everything is. So is it really pointless music or does it in fact serve a very important purpose? As indirect (and probably ineffective for that matter) as it may be, does pop music actually make our world a better place by uplifting our women’s spirits, which in turn forces us men to pretend to be in a good mood so that ultimately we get what we want from them? I’m half kidding. Well, not about pop music making the world a better place; that I’m whole kidding. In all seriousness though, this shit does actually do a good job of bringing about a better mood. Wifey included, of course.

Did the Biebs release this album yet? Either way, I gotta believe (you like what I just did there?) this one is gonna blow the fuck up. But by me sharing this illegal free download, I feel as though I am contributing to the “save a young talented dude from becoming an overly rich, arrogant, condescending douchebag fund.” Well, maybe that’s unfair to assume. It never happened to Justin Timberlake. But just like the difference between MJ coming up in the 90’s and Lebron coming up in today’s new instantaneously needy social media and news era, it’s a whole new level of exposure and ludicrous (boom. 2 for 2) adoration famous people have to survive through. And let’s be clear on one more thing; JB, regardless of his insane level of future fame all around the world (stop it!), will never be the OG JT. Just like LBJ, regardless of the rings he will win at some point, will never be MJ.

This is a jam, plain and simple. Starts out slow, but give it a second and let the beat build biiiiiiiiitch. (sidenote: remember when Lil Wayne didn’t suck?). The Lenny sample is pretty key. Did I mention how much I hate strictly instrumental club jams? That’s right. Deadmau5 does about as much for me as Cameron Diaz or Reese Witherspoon. Not a whole lot.

This one isn’t as hype as the rest, and maybe doesn’t fit so well under the “club” mantra. But I have heard the original song played at bars, which is really weird and kind of depressing. I mean, I like the song too, but at least play the Chuck Inglish version or another more up-beat remix. Thank you in advance. Err, you’re welcome?

So apparently this type of reggaeish house jam below is considered moombahton? I would like to investigate the origins of something like that. Who was the person to come up with that nomenclature and how many songs did it take before people stopped laughing in their face after referring to it as such? *Sidenote #1: How smart do I sound when I feel like it?* You know, when does that “tipping point” occur? *Sidenote #2: If sociology and/or the way social trends/word of mouth spread, then you need to get your hands on Malcolm Gladwell’s The Tipping Point. If there were ever an appropriate time to say it, “epic” read.* I don’t remember what I was talking about, but upon hearing this song, I automatically heard Ice Cube’s “It Was a Good Day.” Surprisingly, it wasn’t even the instrumental that stood out, it was the “Do I….” from Ron Isley’s “Footsteps In The Dark.”Haha, how awesome is that? I can’t believe Mr. Biggs played such an integral role in more than just my favorite R. Kelly jams of all time.*Sidenote #3: SEE BELOW FOR THEE THROWBACK JAM OF ALL TIME!* And then check out Riot’s joint.

You know what I think happened with this whole dubstep phenomenon? I think dudes were kinda embarrassed for liking sweet ass pop/club music so they felt the need to throw in a bunch of hardcore robot fucking so they wouldn’t come off so soft. Think about it. It would be difficult to differentiate these songs from other poppy club songs if you just listened to the normal verse portion, that is with the soothing vocals about love or some shit, along with the happy-go-lucky beat that makes everyone want to join hands and dance together. I mean, how soft is that shit? But then throw in some crazy “whatever-the-fuck you call those sounds” and it’s all of a sudden got an edge to it, and one can point out that portion of the song/music when someone calls them a pussy for liking soft ass pop music. It’s like heavy metal rock, dudes even make the same head-banging motion when it hits hard. I just don’t understand how anyone can actually enjoy that noise, unless of course they were trying to overcompensate for something else. And to a lesser degree, same with those mean ass rap beats with way too much bass and just a bunch of snare drums/noises from Rick Ross’s mouth. There is also the outside chance that it really is merely a matter of taste and this rant is solely based on my musically elitist attitude, but hey at least I’m honest, right? I actually enjoy that sweet as sugar type shit sometimes (see previous post) and would ABSOLUTELY enjoy each one of these songs a lot more without the self-conscious robot fucking. I don’t necessarily HATE dubstep, and these are all still good listens nonetheless. Adventure Club actually gets a pass because even their “noises” somewhat resemble music and do go along with the rest of the song for the most part. Skrillex, on the other hand, gets no such benefit of the doubt. Dude has got some issues and I hate that he feels the need to ruin what otherwise would be really good, albeit soft as hell, club/pop music.

Majah Lazah! More mellow than what we’re use to hearing from these dudes, but amazing nonetheless. I wish I knew how to describe electronically produced sounds, because I would be more specific. But all in all, I love the sounds in this song. Soft female vocals always a plus as well.

I like to think that I discovered Miguel because I fell in love with that “Sure Thing” joint when I heard it off some obscure new school mixtape back in 09 before anyone gave a shit. Obviously, that is ridiculous. But still, I knew dude had talent right from the start. Well, seems like that talent is growing, and “it’s just a matter of time”, literally, before he get’s it all. This one works really well in the motivation department.

What, just because I enjoy my own personal journeys with emo-esque rap music courtesy of Joe Budden and the like means I can’t also wanna get up and dance with somebody to the sweet sounds of Whitney (RIP) over some funky Chromeo beats?…I’m not afraid to say it, this shit gets me moving. I’m an eighties baby, baby!

Is the alliteration thing too obvious? In any event, whether you’re trying to sweat it out on the dance floor or the treadmill, these beats outta get the blood flowing. I don’t really have anything else to say about the music because I’ve been too focused watching my shorthanded Bulls take it to the Knicks in the Garden. Derrick Rose again showed us why he is the MVP of the league. So sick. As a Bulls fan, it’s truly a blessing to witness this kid’s growth. It’s real nice to be a season ticket holder too.

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