My friend and I have been trying to play the game together, but I can never find his server. I have refreshed the lists and gotten new lists many times, but his game never shows. The same happens when I make a game and he tries to join. Help!

If it's just the two of you having a bash about, there is an easier way

First, get your friend to go to http://www.whatismyipaddress.com before he starts JO.
Then, over your IM prog (or e-mail), get him to tell you his IP address.
Once he's got his game running, start yours and bring the console down and type \connect 12.345.67.890
Obviously, change the number for your friends IP address
Your computer will connect to his (or vice versa if you want to host) and you can enjoy kicking the living carp out of each other, laming, swearing and spamming red DFAs without the restrictions you face on a regular server.
Like me and BawBag do