Bell: So who decides what's a bozo eruption?

Go out, stay in, enjoy, love, laugh, exchange gifts, act like a Scrooge, act like Santa, visit loved ones, go to church, proclaim any faith you like or no faith at all, kiss under the mistletoe, forget the day altogether, celebrate something else, let visiting Uncle Fred snore in the recliner after dinner.

Christmastime is here but in earnest places like Twitter the usual suspects take no rest.

Boy, those activist insiders of social media, those axe grinders who represent a smidgen of a sliver of the real world, when they’re in the real world at all. Yes, those bitter souls so often choosing back-handed insult over full-throated insight while everyone else is taking their kid to hockey practice or dance class.

They’ve got their knickers in a knot. Oh my. Let the world stop and take notice.

In a year-end interview, United Conservative Leader Jason Kenney warned he had no tolerance for bozo eruptions, undisciplined mouthpieces saying truly hateful and extreme things. He would not put up with them.

But he added those with “crazed political correctness” would not decide where that line into Bozo Land is crossed. People worry about such things because crazed political correctness is real. We live in the age of the offended.

Then comes the line from Kenney causing the offence.

“The problem is people on the left think saying Merry Christmas is hateful.”

Well, the man they love to hate because he just might become premier had done it again. The people on the left were most upset.

Apparently, Kenney had got it wrong. He had stepped in the doo-doo. They think Merry Christmas is just swell and people saying Merry Christmas are not hateful sorts. I am so glad to hear it.

Good news indeed. Now they can help us get out the word to all those companies and organizations. There’s no risk in ditching their insipid Happy Holidays and Season’s Greetings cards that don’t even mention the holiday or the season.

And, if somewhere out there, misguided souls raise a ruckus over Christmas I’m so happy the legions of the left will join us on the barricade.

Ho! Ho! Ho! It’s Christmastime in the city.

Come to think it. Who gets to decide what is a bozo eruption and what is not? Who is judge and jury delivering the verdict on what can and cannot be said in the public square before you get sent into the outer darkness?

We already know some sure convictions for bozo erupting. Let’s face it. Being any kind of social conservative is a big bozo eruption charge waiting to happen.

And not merely social conservatives. Talk too much like a fiscal hawk, too much going on about cutting government and you’ll likely be hit with a bozo charge.

It’s all very unclear, really. Certain things sure look like bozo eruptions but it seems to really matter who is doing the erupting.

Remember when the premier tangled with Catholic schools over the issue of consent before sex.

There was a news story about documents sent from Catholic school superintendents to the NDP government. The story said the superintendents took issue with sexual consent by a partner in marriage. Yikes! No sexual consent needed within marriage!

Notley jumped all over the story.

“Consent is the law in Alberta and under no circumstances will any child in Alberta be taught they have to somehow accept illegal behaviour in a sexual relationship. The end.”

David Eggen, the NDP education minister, said there was “no room for negotiation.”

There was a problem with all this tough talk. Catholics were not alright with people raping their spouses. On the contrary, they believed consent before sex was the bare minimum. They were stricter. They wanted sex within marriage.

Even when the Catholic bishops put out a public letter to every Catholic church talking of “inaccurate reporting and a misrepresentation of our moral teaching,” Notley never acknowledged her bozo eruption.

And her supporters, so quick to crucify others, defended her. Bozo eruptions were something the other side did.

NOTE TO READER: I have pointed out bozo eruptions on both sides.

But let us put all such squabbles aside for the moment. It’s Christmas and I wish all of you a Merry Christmas and all the best. That means you too, Premier Notley.

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