Because I’m using stalking here in a more informal and less malicious form, the quotes are necessary. The stalking I’m referring to starts and stops at the information gathering stage and never becomes harassment.

I’ve googled myself. I’ve googled my friends and I’m sure you have to. I’ve done so just to figure out what’s out there, but what about googling people you don’t know? Or using Spokeo or another white/yellow pages site? Many people do casual/impromptu background checks on others (especially in the online dating scene) and with arguably good reason. You never really know who you’re talking to. Knowledge, after all, is supposed to be power, but where do you draw the line? Just because it may be easy to find out about people online, that doesn’t mean you should do it.

I think the issue occurs when you act on the information you’ve found. It’s one thing to “stalk” somebody’s facebook and go through their pictures and quite another to look up their address or telephone number and make unsolicited calls or visits. I hope that example doesn’t sound too extreme because I think it happens more often than we think. On a more basic level, I once received a facebook message from a guy who knew a mutual friend and had “seen me around” with the mutual friend. That was a bit unsettling to say the least.

HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH?

Don’t divulge all of your information – names, social security number, passwords, phone numbers, addresses/locations, and photos. These two tips from Psychology Today are just as relevant for teens as they are for adults.

Remember everything you post online is public. It doesn’t matter whether or not you delete the message or text. If you’ve published it it’s traceable. When you post things online your creating a cyber fingerprint.

Don’t give out personal and confidential information online. Never share your full name, home address, phone number, Social Security number, passwords, names of family members, or credit card numbers.

Consider Evan Raitliff’s story – he attempted to vanish while challenging the world to find him. Not to spoil the story, but Evan was found. His pursuers were able to track his whereabouts through technological means – IP addresses, video cameras, and ATM transactions – but they were also able to find him because they knew about his interests. I don’t think any of the people searching for Evan had any malicious intent, but imagine if they had with the kind of information they were able to generate. The sheer volume is both impressive and scary. Even more daunting? It appears that all the information was gathered legally. That isn’t to say you should be George Orwell 1984 paranoid, but it would be remiss not to proceed with caution.

IDENTITY THEFT

Not talked about necessarily within my age group, but I think that putting your info out there also makes you susceptible to identity theft. A study by Carnegie Mellon University found that all a criminal might need is your birth date and location to accurately guess your social security number. Credit cards and other financial information can be stolen as well as something as simple as a picture. Somebody could steal one of your photos and masquerade as you or use your likeness to pretend to be another person.

BE PROACTIVE

When I looked up my mom on Spokeo and found her cell phone number there for the world to see, I immediately set out to figure out how to get the information deleted. If you know what information about yourself is out there, then you’ll be better equipped to figure out how to take it down.

The bottom line is to be smart about not only what information you put out but what you do with the information you are given.

Fail Whale actually refers to the above image – displayed (with unmitigated frequency in the past) to alert Twitter users that the site was over capacity. Sarah Perez offers a fuller Story of the Fail Whale.

For my purposes, I’m defining a fail whale as a user who disregards the following rules/commandments for proper Twitter usage. As always the Twitter etiquette (Twitequette) are my beliefs and the compilation of prevailing opinions. Hopefully these will help users avoid not only other fail whales but prevent them from becoming fail whales themselves.

I. Be You – If you’re going to be a fake say so, but it is probably better to leave the parodying to the big boys – Lord Voldemort, DaggumRoy, etc.

IV. Following/Unfollowing – Unfollowing is a bit less intense than defriending, so don’t feel obligated to continue to follow people. Just because somebody follows you doesn’t mean you have to follow them.

V. Think Before You Tweet – Once it’s gone. It’s gone. You can’t get back what you tweet, even if you delete it. (The Library of Congress is archiving all public Tweets). Don’t put your digital foot in your mouth and shy away from twit-fights.

Generally –

Everything in moderation (tweets, RTs, @s, #s).

Spam is bad.

Time and place are everything. You wouldn’t tweet from a funeral would you?

Be mindful of the 140 character limit. You’ll have to keep your content short & concise. Modified grammar rules just for Twitter can help.

Be weary of the mob mentality. Just because everybody else is doing it doesn’t mean you have to do it too.

Don’t perpetuate wrong or unverified news like the death of celebrities.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Plenty of Fish, E-Harmony, Match.com, etc. Those websites might be familiar to you as popular dating websites. That list, however, is far from complete – the number of dating sites is exhaustive, each offering to serve specific needs (JDate – “The Premier Jewish Community Online for Dating Jewish Singles,” for instance). The prevalence of those sites and others has even sparked interest in academia.

In addition to the websites to help you find a date, there is no shortage of ways to communicate with that date digitally – texting, instant messaging, emailing, skyping. It certainly is easier to keep in touch with others, butwhether or not technology’s influence on matters of the heart will ultimately be positive remains to be seen. What about new dating dilemmas? That, however, isn’t exactly the question I’m looking to answer. I’m more concerned about how to stay cordial in the face of ever changing tools of communication.

Unfriending or defriending has often been hailed as one of the major Facebook don’ts. To unfriend/defriend means to remove (delete) a user from a social networking site. It’s dominant use is in conjunction with Facebook. In the interest of full disclosure, I will state that I unfriend Facebook friends regularly. Every couple of months, I go through my friends list and make cuts where I see fit. I keep my friend list right around 300 people. Most, however, find unfriending to be petty and passive aggressive. I agree that the action can be quite rude when done impulsively and/or for the wrong reasons.

There are however, some general guidelines to follow while using Facebook. A quick Google search of “Facebook Etiquette” will yield several pages of results. YourTango even offers the following video :

The following tips are a compilation of my own opinions.

FRIENDING

Don’t feel obligated to add everyone who requests to be your friend.

By the same token, you don’t have to add everyone you know. Finding your best from kindergarten doesn’t necessitate cyber friendship.

If a friend is using Facebook in a way you disagree with (updating too often for example), then try to hide them before completely removing them.