The Black Sheep

How to Have the Perfect LSU Sneaux Day

By the grace of our Almighty Father, F. King Alexander, we have been blessed with not one, but TWO, sneaux days this year! A snow day means no school and no work, but it also means you have a lot of free time on your hands and nothing to do with it. If you’re unsure of how to keep busy during an LSU sneaux day, look no further.

6.) Sneaux Luge:Any good Old-Row-watching citizen knows that the key to good entertainment is a luge. Whether it be a boob luge, an ass luge, or a boot luge, the crowd will be satisfied. What better way to incorporate the snow into your daily activities?

5.) Photeaux Shoot:All LSU students understand how few and far between seeing snow is, so photoshoots in the snow are an absolute must. Break out the disposable camera and your Fuji Film Instax and get to snappin’.

4.) Become a Master Mixologist:Two parts Starbucks’ Gingerbread Latte. Six parts Taaka. The perfect snow day cocktail. Perfecting this cocktail could take all day, so you may need to set some serious time aside for this activity.

3.) Juul Hotbox:You’re stuck in a 500 square-foot apartment for 24 hours, there is only one solution: complete a Juul hotbox. Hopefully, like any good Juul-er, you’re stocked up on plenty of pods to complete this mission. When it’s over, grab some snacks, sit down, and bask in your smoky accomplishment.

2.) Fuck It, Tigerland:Even though your parents, LSU E-Text, and the weather channel told you not to drive anywhere, the undying yearn for LSU students to go to Tigerland wins you over. Just say “fuck it” and go to Tigerland. You’d be an idiot to pass up Mike’s Sneaux Day $5 Spiked Hot Chocolate.

1.) Prepare for Tomorrow:After guzzling down spiked hot chocolate for six straight hours, it’s time to go home and get ready for school! Since you’ll be getting home at 3 a.m., there’s no time for sleep! Play in the remaining snow until your 8 a.m. and just pray everyone in your class had the same type of sneaux day you did. Thank god this only happens once or twice a year.