Fellows, if you're on, I will spin a yarn That was told to me by able seaman Jones. Once he had the blues, So he took a cruise Far away from night clubs and from saxophones. He said, "Yo-ho, I've made a certain port, And when you talk about real he-man sport—

Hot ginger and dynamite, There's nothing but that at night Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo. They way they can entertain Would hurry a hurricane, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo.

In Fujiyama, You get a mama, Then your troubles increase. In some pagoda, She orders soda, The earth shakes, milk-shakes, ten cents a piece. They kissy and huggy nice. By jingo! It's worth the price, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

Now when the day is warm You can keep in form With a bowl of rice beneath a parasol. Every gentleman Has to use a fan And they only use suspenders in the fall. That's where the girls don't think of rings and furs. Gosh, it's the nicest place that ever were.

They give you a carriage free. The horse is a Japanee, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo. They sit you upon the floor. No wonder your pants get sore, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo.

With Sweet Kimoner, I pulled a boner. I kept it up at high speed. I got rheumatics, And then sciatics. Halitosis, that's guaranteed. You just have to act your age Or wind up inside a cage, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo.

With an ice-cream cone and a bottle of tea, You can rest all day by the hickory tree, But when night comes round, oh gosh, oh gee, Mother, mother, mother, pin a rose on me.

Those pretty mamas In pink pajamas, They try to give you a kiss. Those torrid teases In B.V.D.ses, Heaven help a sailor on a night like this! Not too gentle and not too rough, But you've got to tell them when you've had enough, Back in Nagasaki Where the fellas chew tobacky And the women wicky-wacky-woo.

It's hard to imagine a more bizarre song than this one that you've dredged up. I kind of like it and may revive it at the next gathering of the Press Room crowd. They may well be speechless for several minutes.

Fellows, if you're arn I will spin a yarn That was told to me by Able Seaman Jones. Once he had the blues So he took a cruise Far away from night-clubs and from saxophones. He said, "Yo Ho, I've made a certain port And when you talk about real he-man sport":

Hot ginger and dynamite There's nothing but that at night Back in Nagasaki Where the fellers chew tobaccy And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

In Fujiama You get a mama Then your troubles increase. In some pagoda She orders soda Earth-shake milk-shakes, ten cents a piece Then kissy and huggy nice Oh, By Jingo, It's worth the price. Back in Nagasaki Where the fellers chew tobaccy And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

Now when the day is warm You can keep in form With a bowl of rice beneath a parasol. Every gentle man Has to use a fan And they only use suspenders in the fall. That's where the girls don't think of rings and furs. Gosh, it's the nicest place that ever weres.

They give you a carriage free The horse is a Japanee Back in Nagasaki Where the fellers chew tobaccy And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

They sit you upon the floor No wonder your pants get sore Back in Nagasaki Where the felers chew tobaccy And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

With Sweet Kimoner I pulled a boner I kept it up at high speed I got rheumatics And then psyatics Halatosis, that's guaranteed. You just have to act your age Or wind up inside a cage Back in Nagasaki Where the fellers chew tobaccy Ant the women wicky-wacky Woo.

With an ice-cream cone and a bottle of tea You can rest all day by the hickory tree But when night comes round, oh gosh oh gee, Mother, mother, mother, pin a rose on me.

Those pretty mamas In pink pyjamas That try to give you a kiss Those fond teases In B. V. D. ses Heaven help a sailor on a night like this ! Not too gentle and not too rough But you've got to tell them when you've had enough. Back in Nagasaki Where the fellers chew tobaccy And the women wicky-wacky Woo.

Sigh ! They no longer compose deep, meaningful songs like this any more. Inspired for a search by the singing of Bertie Wooster and comments by Jeeves.

Written in 1928. One nice thing about the Jeeves & Wooster episode is that Bertie (Hugh Laurie) sings the intro to the song, which is all too often omitted. The song's a great favorite with the ukulele crowd. I'm sure this song must have been

There are many variations on the lyrics, including additional or replacement verses; the above lyrics may not be the original ones. The first verse, at least, coincides with most versions I've heard.

Q, I find it useful to Google with the qualifier "site:mudcat.org". It finds recent things quite reliably--even when they've been posted on the same day, or even within the same hour! Big Brother is watching...