Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

The line between "dumb move" and "capital crime" seems to have blurred considerably since I was a pigtailed schoolgirl. And the civil rights we (and the lawyers) were worried about involved folks being turned away from polling places, and/or lynched.

BTW, for for pack saddle. Obviously, the teacher is an idiot. Although that link is to Fox, I think it is fair. Myself, I make certain younguns know that their teachers barely made it into college (lowest SATs, on average, every single year, every single college). I've actually had a youngun ask me, what we were going to do when the flood came, because he was forced to watch the idiot Gore's presentation of propoganda, prepared by fake scientists, paid for by George Soros.

Don't Tancredo with me, Bloglits, on this issue, or any other that involves indoctrinating kids with stupid, pretend, science. I know vastly more than you do about the subject and I'm tired of being nice, just because you are dumbasses about math, chemistry, and physics. Send your hateful responses to the idiots that promulgate that fake crap that is used to scare people, not me. I can personally walk you through the issues that are actually scary and will not tolerate some brain-dead @sshole misinforming my friends, family, or the children around me. You are my friends. No misinformation allowed. I have several hours of driving ahead of me, just now, to go pick up my Baby that believes some of this crap, butt I love her and cut her a break. I do not cut people that are dumb, and biased, getting anywhere near a child that I love, any slack.

End rant. Sorry, I won't be here to respond to any disagreements; I have three counties to drive across to go rescue crossgirl, and bring her home.

During which, I will be listening to her youngest chatter and my Gators play football.

Looks like we are going to have to take up a collection to send you off for some self assertiveness training. You obviously have difficulty in communicating your true feelings about people.

You might want to study Al Gore. He managed to flunk out of divinity school, but is now a world recognized scientist who received a Nobel Prize based on his landmark scientific findings. Just think what a wonderful world this would be if all those students wasting their time studying science in colleges and universities all around the world would just quit college and start preaching the gospel according to Albert the Enlightened.

Sigh. I am ashamed that there are such sucky teachers who make us all look bad. Every day I go into the classroom, fighting the good fight, trying to teach critical thinking and balance, and then I see something like this...

I mean, yeah, I hate the Yankees as much as the rest of the planet, but come on!

Thanks to many of you above who responded quite lightly with a request to hold the rants. I know a few weeks ago a couple people felt personally hurt by a couple of rants. I'm a teacher too, and I'll just say, not to excuse this guy (see previous thread), but with the pay scale, the personal venom from parents, and the public venom we've endured for the 30 years I've been teaching, who do you think is going to teach your kids? And I got a 760 on math, and I'm an artist, thank you very much.

And I don't hate any team... I mean, as a life-long Twins fan, what choice do I have?

Wow it's raining cats and dogs here! In fact I just went outside and stepped in a poodle! Attempting to lighten the mood. Seriously, all of ya'll are great. I've had some health problems lately but I always feel better when I visit the blog. Thank you for all the laughs.

Wow. How impressive, CJ. You know it all, don't you? We bow before you.....

Well, believe it or not, I don't honestly care what you think about politics or any other hot-button issues. I came here after a long day, too. I wanted some laughs, and the opportunity to give some if I had it in me. Instead, I get to read some foolish bombast from a usually intelligent person who declares his opinion, declares the absolute rightness of that opinion, and concludes by declaring an unwillingness to listen to any response that might be forthcoming, because he knows it all, and that is that. You, sir, are a walking warning that ignorance can coexist with intellect. Firmness of opinions is a respectable thing, but obnoxious declaration of superiority is not. It's a democratic (small "d") society, here included - get over it.

This is harsh, and I'm sorry about that. I normally try to be careful here, and hold my virtual tongue when I see someone setting off the idiotic, ugly cycle of rant and counter-rant. And, normally, I would say something like this behind the scenes to the person involved instead of publicly. But enough is enough, and a public flogging is more than deserved.

So nobody liked my poodle joke? I stole it from Steve Martin! I only steal from the best. If I promise not to tell that joke again will you come back Mary and anybody else that's left us? Please? I have a great one about a South Carolina Highway Patrolman and a New York Lawyer.

lightening bugs take themselves quite seriously when they go out at night: they wear fancy clothes & flashy jewelry and are followed everywhere by paparazzi who are constantly taking flash photographs of them

fireflies on the other hand are much more laid back and fun - they're the jokers, the smokers and the midnight tokers

second: i've known cj to go off like this. i've seen it before; twice, on other blogs. i've seen him receive public floggings before; gave him one myself. i saved him from a lynch mob once, too. i thought he might have learned something from those interactions. apparently not. (hey ceej, remember that one about "the definition of insanity"?)

my advice is to y'all is to back away slowly. try to avoid eye contact.

Hey, CJ? If we wanted your opinion, on anything, we would have asked you for it. Some of us have been here, reading this blog, long before your attempts to ruin it. Please, take this as a kind hint to cease posting your "rants" against whatever demons you may have, real or imagined? The key word here is "humor blog".

Well, I've been reading for a long time, too. And I've had so much enjoyment from y'alls comments, that if CJ or Meanie or Souxie or anyone needs to let off some steam, I say they deserve it. I can pass out grains of salt to any who need it....