A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn’t even pay for your sandwich!”

At first it looks like the possessed Hostess Cupcake from Hell, and then we step up and — hey, what do you know! — it’s just Carnitas the mini-peeg, rooting around in the teensy bed, looking for the car keys!

Yes, it’s Black Fawn, international jet-setting supermodel! Maker of trends, breaker of hearts, always on the go! Breakfast in London, lunch in Paris, dinner in Milan! It’s just another day in the fabulous life of… Black Fawn!

“A young long tailed macaque monkey has been spotted in a forest protectively nuzzling and grooming a ginger kitten and making sure no harm came to it. The extraordinary sight was captured by amateur photographer Anne Young while on holiday at the Monkey Forest Park, in the Ubud region of Bali, Indonesia.”

“The kitten enjoyed the attention being lavished on it by its protective carer and made no effort to leave.”

The insanity continues over at the Telegraph. Thanks for Pointer-Outering, Brinke G.!

Here’s jubilant news from the Prospect Park Zoo:
Baboon baby birth, and not just one, but two!
They’ve each got a mommy, both rambunctious males,
So feisty they’ve got to be held by their tails.

So while the boys wrassle and play baboon games,
The Zoo asks the public to help give them names.
At the moment, they just call the kids “one” and “two,”
But that’s no good, peeps, so you know what to do.