Best Of APW 2018

It’s that time of year again. This is where we leave you (until January). And whenever we get to this juncture of the year, I always take a minute to take stock of where we’ve been this year, as a team and as a company.

Some years feel easy to wrap my head around. For example, 2017 was really difficult. It was the hardest year we’d ever had in business, and it was the most politically traumatizing year of my life. And 2016 was a good year of business, complete with a business trip to Lisbon at the end (where Trump was elected right in the middle of the trip, turning it from great to terrible). But 2018? Well, it was… a lot. After the trauma of 2017, our team ended the year with an intention ritual, where we burned a sheet of paper with the word abundance on it. Perhaps we should have been more specific.

And Tragedy

But as I look at that professional timeline, I see my own personal timeline woven in between it, as red lines of pain. Before I left for my keynote at Alt, my dad was rushed to the ER with a gallbladder infection, and just when the doctors told us he was going to be fine, he suddenly turned septic and brushed very close to death. I kept a vigil in the ICU, and he was finally well enough to go to a skilled nursing facility just in time for me to leave to give a keynote. Then, during that bachelorette party in Palm Springs, my dad slipped and fell while walking the dog. I missed his last truly coherent words in the ER before his brain swelled, sending my husband there to witness them instead. By the time I got back, he was moving from ICU, to hospital, to rehab facility, and I spent the entire summer trying to operate as his primary caregiver and patient advocate, while raising two small children and running a business. Then mid-summer, just when things were improving, we checked my dad into the hospital for behavioral medication titration. I left in the middle of that wildly mismanaged stay to run our summer camp (in retrospect I look swollen and out of it in nearly every picture), and by the time I got back, my dad was dying. He left this earth exactly two weeks after The Compact Summer Camp ended. And the autumn, was, of course, largely a blur of grief, mixed with the ever-present joy of having small children.

The State Of Independent Publishing

As for independent publishing, well. With that too, it’s felt like a mix of the best of times and worst of times. Much has been written about how everyone’s over-reliance on apps and social media has made publishing a very difficult place to be. (Tavi Gevinson wrote a clear-eyed and shockingly un-bitter take on the state of independent publishing when she announced the shuttering of Rookie last month.) I started APW before influencer marketing (or decent display ad revenue) were really things. And we’ve been able to see those businesses grow and develop… while also try to manage the enormous scope-creep that’s happened. Because writing a post isn’t enough anymore. Now a post comes with a full photo shoot, content across several platforms, and sometimes a full-scale event (not to mention several ad agencies in on the action, all taking large cuts of cash before we see a penny.)

Who knows where we’re going next. But in the midst of all of this change, APW scaled back and focused on what we love, and that’s been a good process. Because did I mention our offices got robbed two days in a row, just one week after my dad’s funeral, with $30K worth of (blessedly insured) property taken? So in the aftermath of that, we moved out of our office (we move into a new, and smaller, office in January, and we’ll finally get to get all our things out of storage), and scaled back our team. In the midst of all that abundance—the good kind, and the bad kind—focusing on working with the people we care most about has been the best thing we could do. I currently work with a staff that has seen me give my dad’s eulogy, and has virtually or physically witnessed me sob over really hard stuff and hasn’t blinked in the face of that. And for that, I am profoundly grateful.

Over the past few years, we worked hard to do what we thought we should do—expand APW to a somewhat bigger business with formal offices and a more formal management structure and a larger staff. Turns out, we didn’t like that much. There may be a time when we join up with a bigger team, but for now it turns out I don’t want to spend the majority of my time as a manager. I want to be in the trenches, working as an editor and a business strategist and collaborating with people I like and trust, as friends and colleagues.

Plus, when I look at the work we produced this year, I am really proud of it (and last year, I did not uniformly feel that way). In fact, I loved so much of it that creating this Best of APW 2018 post took a lot of time and a fair amount of editing. (After all, it can’t all be the best.) That’s a huge turnaround from a rough 2017, and I’m so grateful for our team that made it happen. (Najva Sol included, who left our ranks for another job in August and is currently on the market for a new gig. Someone should hire her, she’s the best.) OH! And we landed in Ad Week for one of our campaigns this year, which is basically a big goddamn deal.

So here is to 2019. Who knows what it will bring. But when I burn my paper with an intention this year, I’m going to be more specific about the kind of abundance I want… while remaining grateful for all the wild abundance 2018 brought, along with the pain.

Here is to what’s next.

xo,

Meg

P.S. Oh, and I just signed a contract for the second edition of the first APW book (it’s somehow been seven years since it came out), so look for an updated version of that book this time next year!

While it’s easy to boil down the last-name decision to a series of simple choices and practicalities, in real life, there is a whole lot of emotion involved. And guess what? Women are still taking on the emotional labor of it all.

Weddings

Sometimes a wedding comes across our desk and our whole staff is like WHO ARE THEY, WHAT IS THIS? Seriously though, this wedding is GLAMAF, and the bride and groom look like models. WARNING: Happy tears may flow.

One of APW’s most popular weddings this year was this $10K super hip, joy-filled gay wedding, complete with tacos (and neon lights). And with a sign that says tequila over boys, can it really get any better?

Two architects, one wedding. This wedding in a glass chapel in the woods with (gasp!) all the bridesmaids in white jumpsuits is super modern and ultra glamorous.

An Indian/American wedding perfectly balanced between old-school traditions and modern flair. And an epic alcohol-free dancing filled reception with the best party picture of Grandma ever!

When you have two impeccably dressed brides and one awesome venue in the dessert, what else are you supposed to do besides host your closest friends and family from all over the world to celebrate your love?

A custom green velvet wedding dress and a change into a luxe floral tux—need we say more? This small town Northern California, backyard wedding has everything you were missing in 2018, kissing booth included.

This isn’t your average pizza party wedding. Unless your average pizza party includes a wedding cape and a floral whip. My guess, probably not.

Morning is for a traditional church wedding and afternoon is for a completely punk reception, if you’re this Southern California couple. Sometimes you need to ditch the heels and go for a pair of metallic pink sneakers to dance your ass of to your punk music wedding playlist.

A waiter told me I should sit down and be grateful. Unfortunately for him, we were right in the middle of the Kavanaugh hearings and I had rage. And nothing but time and white privilege that I was delighted to weaponize.

When you choose your spouse, you get your in-laws too. This Jewish letter writer’s future in-laws said some “weird, vaguely anti-Semitic things,” and she’s not sure how to navigate this situation.

Life

You know how I talked about spending a lot of time in the hospital this year? Well, it gave me a lot of time to think about marriage and how aging parents and other heartbreaks affect relationships. Especially the relationship you have with your partner.

Climbing the generational income ladder can come with complex feelings about money and class. Jareesa discovers some of her points of view stay the same and others change.

My husband and I both make money, we throw it in a joint pot, we make financial decisions. So why is it that women are still dragging patriarchy inside our homes and embedding inequality in our wallets and relationships?

Thanks for stying with us for the ride in 2018. It’s been good, and hard, and well, pretty much everything. But you all made what we do possible, and every day better. See you in 2019!

Meg Keene

Founder & Editor-In-Chief

Meg is the Founder of APW, and has been the sites EIC for the past eleven years. She has written two best selling wedding books:A Practical Weddingand A Practical Wedding Planner. Meg’s work has been referenced in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, NPR, Jezebel, and Refinery29. She’s also written hugely viral wedding articles for Buzzfeed. She lives in Oakland, CA with her husband and two children. For more than you ever wanted to know about Meg, you can visit MegKeene.com.

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