AverageCats

Lasers

If cats had lasers, this site would not exist. We would all be forced to work in the great cat food mines. There, we would live in fear of our feline overlords, although most likely we would still find them adorable.

48 Responses to “Lasers”

Don’t tell me this site is already turning into crap. The bit about cat food minds and feline overlords doesn’t fit here, something about the eyes reflecting the flash from the camera would be far more appropriate. I am disappointed.

I agree with Adam. Even though I think that the concept of adorable feline overlords and cat food mines is hilarious, it does not fit at all with the “average” mentality of this website. That’s a very ICHC type idea.

If cats had lasers, this site would not exist. We would all be forced to work in the great cat food mines. There, we would live in fear of our feline overlords, although most likely Cats would be required to wear mirrored sunglases & we would still find them adorable.

Instead of sunglasses they would wear mirrored goggles (the elastic strap would hold it on to their face) but the mirror would simply reflect the lasers back at the cats and wouldn’t this then kill the cat??

Oh, nothing is wrong with Harry Potter references, but they have no place on MLIA. The site went from actual average things (i.e. “I brushed my teeth today”) to all of these stupid yelling out spells in public, getting asked out by a random guy/girl, high fiving strangers, finding new best friends things, it isn’t average at all.

Well people brushing their teeth does not make me laugh. I like all MLIA’s that are funny or at least make me smile. I would never randomly yell out spells in public. Only accio when I’m looking for something which I do without thinking anyway.

But you see, the average is not funny, and thus a website dedicated to average people doing average things is funny. It’s what I like to call the humor paradox. Sometimes things can be humorous solely for their lack of humor. If you want silly spell casting, set up harrypotterreferences.com or something, it has no place on MLIA.

The reflection of the camera flash in this photograph illustrates why the reflective objects in the centre of roads are referred to as ‘cats eyes’. Lasers are not produced by using reflected light. Researching lasers on the ‘net will confirm this.

Instead of sunglasses they would wear mirrored goggles (the elastic strap would hold it on to their face) but the mirror would simply reflect the lasers back at the cats and wouldn’t this then kill the cat??

Not exactly. Presuming that lasers would originate inside the cat’s eye, and then travel out through the Iris, the lens and covering of the eye would have to be able to tolerate the laser fire, as would the rest of the eye itself.

Anything that can withstand lasers to a point at which lasers are originated within it can withstand a laser backblast.

Id like to point out that you’re right in saying that a majority of the stuff on MLIA isn’t in fact average. But the reason its funny is because it happens to average people and its completely plausible. Can anyone honestly say they can’t imagine some of these things actually happening to them? That’s why its funny. Its unusual, but relatable.

Point the First: ‘Grow up and have a bit of imagination’ — Imagination is for childhood. Deadpan humor is my preference, and has been since I was younger. It doesn’t take “imagination” to understand “humor”. Ever.

Point the Second: Adam, you are a champion amongst trolls. We should establish a beachhead on “teh intarnetz” for Meme Segregationalists.

Point the Third: Harry Potter is good. Harry Potter references are choking the life out of that which is good. Fan[girls/boys] have killed everything.

Adam-
While I agree with the statement you made about things not being average on MLIA, I think you are over-thinking it. Simply, it’s a site where random things happen to people and they proceed like nothing unusual is going on. People who cast out spells in the middle of Borders don’t sit there laughing at each other, they take it seriously and whoever is the victim of Avada Kedavra will fall to the floor dead. Simple as that. There is no “Good game!” and “WHOO!!”. It’s just….average. They don’t make a big deal about it. Until they post, however.

SuccessfulTroll is correct, stupid fan people are annoying. However, I feel like a fan person myself when I see yellow and black together and immediately think (and mostly say) “She’s wearing Hufflepuff colors”. So what if we say spells? Some of us think normal life is boring, and although the spells don’t enroll you in Hogwarts, it brings a smile to your face when some stranger on the street looks at you like you belong on the Funny Farm.

And just so you know, Harry Potter would not be popular without fans. Just saying.

@ selenology: You have a point. Considering that this site is derived entirely from sparking humor by diverging from the expected norm of the internet, perhaps there is some sense in diverging from the expected norm of the site.

Maybe we should make a spinoff-site spinoff site. Anybody up for MaybeCatsAreNotSoAverageAfterAll.com ?

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For those who read while eating, how do you magnae your book and your fork?:pPersonally, if it was a main meal, ma7ib asawi shay wana akil, la tv wala ghaira, +yofathal i wear something comfortable. ama for snacks, fa i usually eat them to please myself when doing boring stuff like studying. w ham when eating snacks, i prefer to watch episodes of my favorite tv shows.