Theresa May, I fear that both of us will have to get used to disappointment | Marina Hyde

The prime minister has a somewhat rosy view of Britain’s future after Brexit. Her government seems to operate on fact-free messianism

I don’t want to spend all my time arguing about Europe,” said the Plymouth MP Johnny Mercer today. “That’s not why I joined the Conservative party.” Really? This is like downloading a movie called Reservoir Dogging and feeling like the dialogue wasn’t as crackling as everyone said it was. Still, have you been mis-sold Conservative party membership? Are you shocked – shocked! – to find that arguing about Europe is going on in here? Do you read Playboy for the interviews? If so, there’s a job going at the David Cameron Institute for Settling Issues for a Generation.

Another week, another masterclass from the self-styled natural party of government. The prime minister’s trip to China saw her forced to claim “I am not a quitter”, before being humiliatingly congratulated in a Chinese state newspaper editorial for not bringing up human rights with the regime. (Bit disappointed they didn’t headline it “May, you live in interesting times”, but I am available for advice next time they send a subeditor to the labour camps.)