The New Dad Dictionary: Everything He Really Needs to Know - from A to Z

Are you ready for cluster feedings and cradle cap? How about meconium and jaundice? With The New Dad Dictionary, you no longer have to page through parenting tomes to understand what everyone is talking about. From engorgement to independent play, author Chris Illuminati offers a crash course in today's parenting language, Parenting techniques and theories--on Dad's terms!

Are you ready for cluster feedings and cradle cap? How about meconium and jaundice? With The New Dad Dictionary, you no longer have to page through parenting tomes to understand what everyone is talking about. From engorgement to independent play, author Chris Illuminati offers a crash course in today's parenting language, guiding you through the foreign territory of doctor visits, magazines, and conversations with Mom. Featuring hundreds of real-life explanations for popular words and phrases, each entry not only translates these textbook terms into plain English, but also teaches you what changes to expect from your baby--and Mom--during this time.

So stop banging your head against the wall and discover everything you need to know about raising your child with The New Dad Dictionary!...more

Chris Illuminati --yes, that's his real name, so let's get it out of the way now and move on-- is an author, a blogger, a stand-up comic and a pop culture commentator.

He is the former editor of a men's lifestyle site. He is also a stand-up comic who has taken the stage and performed at Gotham Comedy Club, The Stand and New York Comedy Club. One of his tweets was christened as one of the funniest jChris Illuminati --yes, that's his real name, so let's get it out of the way now and move on-- is an author, a blogger, a stand-up comic and a pop culture commentator.

He is the former editor of a men's lifestyle site. He is also a stand-up comic who has taken the stage and performed at Gotham Comedy Club, The Stand and New York Comedy Club. One of his tweets was christened as one of the funniest jokes of 2013 by The New York Post, which is better than being in paper for, say, doing something really dumb, offensive, or that comes with any sort of jail time, right?

If the New York Post editorial staff "gets" him and his humor, chances are you will, too.

Illuminati isn't afraid to put it all out there and let it all hang out, with the "it" being his personal experience. Whether it's the digital space or on stage during his act, he is comfortable mining his personal life and real life as he knows as source material for his work.

As an author, Illuminati has published several books, including Assholeology: The Science of Getting Your Way And Getting Away With It (2010) with two co-authors; Assholeology: The Cheat Sheet (2011); and Thank You for Not Laughing (2012). The former works are a guidebooks and a field guide about the art of being, well, an ass, and the latter is a collection of notes from his personal journals.

His next book -- The New Dad Dictionary: Everything He Really Needs to Know - from A to Z -- will be published in April, 2015.

As a blogger, pop culture commentator, and writer whose words often live on the glorious w-w-w, Illuminati's work has appeared in a variety of sources and in front of millions of eyeballs, among them BroBible, AskMen, Men's Health, Cosmo, Nerve, Maxim, Uproxx, Huffington Post, Guyism, The Good Man Project and Penthouse.

But wait. That's not all.

Illuminati muses on his role, responsibilities, and unique experiences as a parent who is essentially learning on the job in his hilarious yet poignant A Message With a Bottle website, which pulls in over 200,000 new visitors each month and even raked in a whopping 2.3 million views in June 2014.

In addition to writing about life -but not in a reality TV kinda way, of course- Illuminati has also published several works of fiction that have appeared in online literary journals.

Essentially, Chris Illuminati has a lot to say about a lot of topics, like most of us, but he does so with humor, informed opinion, and with a grasp on what's happening in pop culture, running it through a personal filter. That combination makes most of what he writes and says relatable and able to elicit a chuckle more often than not.