An Antartian was standing in front of a soda machine muttering, "You're a dumb-looking button. You don't have much of a future, either. You're going to be replaced by a much better looking button."
"What are you doing?" another Antartian asked.
The Antartian quickly pointed to the sign on the front of the machine that read "DEPRESS BUTTON FOR ICE".

An Antartian was playing a trivia board game one night. It was her turn, she rolled the dice and landed on "Science & Nature." Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

#738

Thanks to:
Anonymous
rec.:Aug/8/2000 pub.:Aug/8/2000 sent:Aug/8/2000

Ranking:
2.51 / 47

A man, a woman and an Antartican were driving in the desert in a jeep when the car suddenly broke down. Since none of them had any car knowledge, they decided to walk.
Each of them decided to take one thing with them: the man took the food in case he got hungry, the woman took the water in case she got thirsty, and the Antartican took the car door.
When questioned about her choice, the Antartican said, "Well, if I get hot, I can roll down the window!"

#220

Thanks to:
Kelly
rec.:Jan/4/1999 pub.:Jan/4/1999 sent:Jan/4/1999

Ranking:
2.96 / 26

Two Antartians were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph.
"Hey," asked Bob, who was at the wheel, "any cops following us?"
Henry, his passenger, turned around and had a long look at the road behind them.
"Yeah, looks like it," he responded.
"Are his flashers on?" asked Bob.
Henry turned around again...
"Yup...nope...yup...nope...yup...nope...yup..."