Maybe someone should send Shawn Holley and Blair Berk over to the Middle East next. The two celebrity lawyers did what we weren’t sure was possible yesterday: They reached a settlement in the battle between Halle Berry, Olivier Martinez and Gabriel Aubry following their Thanksgiving Day brawl. “The parties have reached an amicable agreement. There will be no further statements regarding this matter,” Berk revealed to TMZ and other outlets, via a handwritten note.

So, we have no idea whether this amicable agreement extends to the underlying dispute over whether Halle and Olivier can take Halle and Gabriel’s daughter, Nahla, to Paris with them (a judge had ruled no earlier this month). It could just be about the order prohibiting Gabriel from seeing Nahla after last week’s fight, which left the Canadian model with a black eye and broken nose and Olivier with some messed up fists.

We’re happy for Aubry’s lawyer Holley, at least, ’cause now she’s going to have to turn her attention back to keeping Lindsay Lohan out of jail. If she can solve that one, we’re pretty sure she can fix global warming too.

We know there aren’t any faces in this pic, but that is the unmistakable bum of Rihanna plus the bald head and tattooed arm of Chris Brown. We’re gonna go out on a limb and say that by sharing this photo with her followers, the “Unapologetic” singer is making her relationship with Breezy “Twitter Official.” Is there such a thing as Twitter Official? Probably not, but we’re coining it now for couples who are unsure about making the deep commitment of becoming Facebook Official. “i don’t wanna leave!!! killed it tonight baby!!!” she captioned the intimate snap, the latest in a long line of hints that point to Riri and Brown leaving their troubled past behind and rekindling their old romantic flame.

Just yesterday the pair showed off his ‘n’ hers Rolex watches on Instagram, but in a brand new interview withXXL Magazine, Chris denies a current relationship with his former lover. “One thing people often want me to talk about is my public love life,” he said. “When it comes to my love life, the perception seems as though I am a player. But that’s not true … Love is something I am still learning. It’s just an obstacle that I haven’t yet mastered. I think that’s my biggest hurdle in life.”

He admits that another hurdle is definitely impulse control, as evidenced by…well, lots of public skirmishes that he’s been involved with over the years, most recently with comedian Jenny Johnson over Twitter. “I haven’t been as mature and thought out in the past, so, me growing now, it’s showing my progression,” he says in the interview, which took place before his outburst at Johnson and consequent Twitter exile. “I used to use my Twitter account to vent, but now I mostly use it for marketing and promotions. Even if the media asks me something, if it’s cool then it’s, ‘What’s up?’ But if it’s anything that’s too negative, I don’t care to respond.”

Say what you will about Lindsay Lohan, she doesn’t do anything halfway. Even where arrests are concerned. The girl somehow managed to be charged with two different crimes on the same day an entire country apart! OK fine, her L.A. charges stemmed from a car accident that took place over five months ago. But still, it’s pretty impressive.

The troubled Liz & Dick actress was charged yesterday by a Santa Monica prosecutor for three misdemeanors relating to the June incident where she plowed her Porsche into the back of a dump truck. At the time she told authorities that her assistant was behind the wheel, but investigators now believe that she was driving herself to the movie set and that she lied to police. As a result, Lilo faces charges including reckless driving, lying to police and obstructing a police officer from performing duties. So essentially, Lindsay got slapped with the legal equivalent of “Liar liar, pants on fire.”

Bear in mind, this charge came mere hours after her smack-down outside of the NYC club Avenue, where she was arrested for suspicion of third-degree assault. New details about this incident are also coming to light. It’s now rumored that the brawl was sparked because she was turned down by Max George of the band The Wanted. She had apparently seen the boy band open for (who else?) Justin Bieber earlier that night and wanted to meet him in person. She got blocked from meeting him back stage (we guess the bouncer saw Liz & Dick) but they met up later that night at Avenue.

Keyshia Cole is really mad, you guys, and she’s not going to hide it — even if it’s her own angry tweets that are actually making us write about this story about a photo said to be of her performing oral sex on a man. We won’t dare post that pic here, but let’s just say that based on the placement of the woman in question’s tattoo, we don’t think it’s her. Still, some of the people spreading the rumor go on to say the man in the pic is not her husband, Daniel Gibson. Which is why Keyshia has been tweeting nonstop since yesterday.

She started off treating it lightly:

But it seems that as the story spread, she didn’t feel like things were such fun anymore.

Rihanna is celebrating her first number one album in style, by picking herself up a brand new Rolex watch! The record breaking pop singer took to Instagram last night to show off her new piece, which appears to be significantly more expensive than the watch we bought out of some dude’s brief case on a street corner. “Don’t believe me just watch #newtoy #justcusimnumber1 #roleylife #dopedealer,” she captioned the photo, which could definitely be an entry for Rich Kids Of Instagram.

Here’s where it gets weird: Chris Brown also posted a picture last night showing off his own super pricey time-piece. Waiiiit a second. Did they get his ‘n’ hers Rolexes? He also posted a picture showing his entire stash of Rolexes soon after, so maybe he gave her one of his collection. We’re guessing in Superstar-Land that means they’re married, right? OK, probably not. But seriously, that bling is at least as expensive as an engagement ring. Who knows, maybe he was just trying to use the watch as a conversation starter (“Oh look, it appears we both have zillion dollar watches. We should discuss this further.”) Even though they may not be “officially” a duo at the moment, the controversial two-some have really kicked the rumor mill into high gear with their awfully couple-y behavior in the last few months.

You know what I really hope my dad does if I’m ever arrested? Calls up Radar Online and blames everything on my mom. That’s what reigning Father of the Year Michael Lohan did this morning, upon learning ofLindsay Lohan’s arrest for allegedly punching a woman in the face at a New York nightclub.

“I TOLD you exactly what would happen and YOU KNOW I was trying to get Dina on board with me for a long time, BUT especially the last two weeks,” he told the site. “Lindsay is acting out in numerous ways because she needs us and internally she’s hurt and angry! Again, it’s ALL on Dina and I wish to God she would stop and resolve things with us to do the same for our children.”

In TMZ’s video footage of Lindsay Lohan being taken away in cuffs by the NYPD this morning, the actress can be heard echoing everyone’s thoughts: “Are you kidding me?” Nope, unfortunately, they were not kidding. According to WABC, Lohan was arrested at 4 a.m. outside New York’s Club Avenue and charged with third-degree assault for allegedly striking a 28-year-old woman in the face.

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According to TMZ, law enforcement sources say Lindsay and the other woman were seated at different booths in the club and exchanged heated words. Lindsay reportedly told her, “Give me my space,” and shortly after that punched the woman in the face. By 8 a.m., Lohan was released from the station with a desk appearance ticket. The woman, who was snapped leaving the precinct as well, did not need medical treatment.

We’re really kind of wondering if Lindsay just feels like she has nothing to lose these days. She’s facing a possible return to jail already, if it’s determined that her lie to the cops about driving in her accident this summer amounts to a probation violation. We can only imagine what an assault charge would do to that case. She dodged a bullet earlier this year when prosecutors decided not to charge her for that alleged hit-and-run — in front of another New York club.

Olive, who let you grow up? We know we’ve been agog at the newly grown-up Abigail Breslin before, but can we say how struck we are by Tyler Shields‘ glam new portraits of the Little Miss Sunshine actress? Somehow Abigail Breslin has been in the lime light during the most awkward years of any human beings life (approximately age 11 to 13) and managed to look adorbs the entire time. Check out our A.B. gallery below if you don’t believe us. Abigail never looked like we did in middle school. Never.

Two and a Half Men star Angus T. Jones‘apology statement released yesterday makes it pretty clear that someone quite firmly reminded him that no matter what new opinions he holds of his hit sitcom, that “filth” pays him a whole lot of money. Money he could probably put to some good Christian use, if he chooses. Hence the contrite words: “I apologize if my remarks reflect me showing indifference to and disrespect of my colleagues and a lack of appreciation of the extraordinary opportunity of which I have been blessed.”

But if exec producer Chuck Lorre and company decide to send Angus the way of his former onscreen uncle Charlie Sheen, that doesn’t have to mean the end of the 19-year-old’s career. He could join these five other celebrities who turned their born-again Christianity into brand-new gigs:

1. Stephen Baldwin
The Baldwin bro visited Good Morning America today and voiced his support and sympathy for Jones, as someone who’s experienced a backlash against his outspoken ways (seriously, this guy called Obama a “cultural terrorist” once). “As a Christian, I had a casting director come up to me two years ago and say, ‘I’m really sorry because I’ve brought your name up in castings for a while now and they all just kind of look at me like I’m crazy,” he said. Now, he’s gone “full-blown faith-based,” acting in Christian themed movies like Loving the Bad Man, about a woman who forgives her rapist. Ick. And then he’ll be back on Celebrity Apprentice soon, which is full-blown … something else.

We cringed earlier this year after hearing about Lisa Robin Kelly‘s arrest for domestic abuse in April, specifically when we spotted her wild-eyed mugshot. As you can see from the That ’70s Show star’s most recent booking photo, sadly, not much has changed. TMZ first reported Kelly’s arrest following an alleged violent incident at her home in North Carolina Monday night; both the former actress and her husband were arrested and jailed as a result of the assault. Combine this news with her mugshots and that extremely unfortunate Good Morning America interview Lisa did this past spring, and you’ve painted a pretty depressing picture of where Laurie Foreman ended up after leaving Wisconsin, especially when compared to her costars.