Instead of flattening the tops, I think they should drill a hole down the center and plumb them as fountains. You could have a syncronized water display that would be the envy of Las Vegas and a year-round tourist destination. Think outside the box, people.

That was a childhood anthem that was popular among the tots back in my day, when we were breast fed on a healty slurry of patriotism, LSD, and a mandatory draft.

Now with the the Lady Gogas and the hippety hop and the feel good dipwads glorping around their padded Nintendo cubes molly coddled on no-contact sports and feel-good traffic barriers wouldn't know how to miss-see a roadside barrier if it was spoon fed to them. If I didn't think some Castro Street funboy would sneak up behind me, throw Nipsy Russell's jockstrap over my eyes, and mount me like Trigger, I'd bend over and dry-heave.

Kids nowadays are raised to look at the world with penis-colored glasses. It sickens me.

FTFA:But the elongated shape and rounded top of the bollards has drawn some derision.

Dear Post-Gazette: I understand your need to maintain some level of decorum for the sake of the rapidly-aging tea-sippers who are the core readership of the Suburban Living section. But seeing as the word penis already made it past at least one editor, let's address the whole problem.

It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?

i upped my meds-up yours:It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?

The groove allows you to tether your horse cock to it when you're done riding.

That was a childhood anthem that was popular among the tots back in my day, when we were breast fed on a healty slurry of patriotism, LSD, and a mandatory draft.

Now with the the Lady Gogas and the hippety hop and the feel good dipwads glorping around their padded Nintendo cubes molly coddled on no-contact sports and feel-good traffic barriers wouldn't know how to miss-see a roadside barrier if it was spoon fed to them. If I didn't think some Castro Street funboy would sneak up behind me, throw Nipsy Russell's jockstrap over my eyes, and mount me like Trigger, I'd bend over and dry-heave.

Kids nowadays are raised to look at the world with penis-colored glasses. It sickens me.

How I long for a simpler age.

Yours in rage,

Ed Anger

Now your kids with your loud music, and your Dan Fogleberg, your Zima, hula hoops and pac-man video games, don't you see? People today have attention spans that can only be measured in nanoseconds!

HailRobonia:I learned a new word, "bollard". Sounds like British slang for a dick.

We use the term in the US too. Any reinforced obstruction designed to protect doorways, fuel pumps, or whatever from vehicle damage is a bollard. Typically they are steel pipes filled with cement and painted yellow, but any design will do. The Target stores around here have big, red spherical bollards. I like to say that "Target puts the ball in bollard" when I visit their stores. Them my wife shushes me.

Dear Post-Gazette: I understand your need to maintain some level of decorum for the sake of the rapidly-aging tea-sippers who are the core readership of the Suburban Living section. But seeing as the word penis already made it past at least one editor, let's address the whole problem.

It's not just the elongated shape. It's not just the rounded top. It's the seemingly gratuitous groove molded into said top. What function could it have other than as a designer's private (snicker) joke?

Sybarite:Now someone just needs to take a can of black spray paint and make a little line on each one.

whatsupchuck:Instead of flattening the tops, I think they should drill a hole down the center and plumb them as fountains. You could have a syncronized water display that would be the envy of Las Vegas and a year-round tourist destination. Think outside the box, people.

Now, you see - this is the kind of thinking we need more of at the local governmental level.