Or, welcome to my low-maintenance heck.

David Espo, a very lovely special correspondent, from the cr(ap)py news service produces one his agency's most beloved pieces of news:

The new Obama administration circulated a draft executive order Wednesday that calls for closing the controversial detention center at Guantanamo Bay within a year and halting any war crimes trials in the meantime.

Closing the facility in Cuba "would further the national security and foreign policy interests of the United States and the interests of justice," read the draft prepared for the new president's signature.

While some of the detainees currently held at Guantanamo would be released, others would be transferred elsewhere and later put on trial under terms to be determined.

Nothing like furthering our national security by releasing terrorists bent upon killing Americans back in to the world, and better yet, America's heartland.

I have a suggestion. Obama, if you are going to release these dregs of humanity upon us, why not give them a job at that PORK processing plant in Iowa that needs workers so bad?

The order circulated as the judge in one war crimes case agreed to Obama's request to suspend proceedings pending a 120-day review.

Army Col. Stephen Henley issued the ruling Wednesday after a brief hearing at the U.S. base in Cuba.

The defendants opposed the delay. All have said they want to plead guilty to charges that carry a potential death sentence.

Here's a quirky thought. Why not just give these terrorists what they want? Why not let them plead guilty and die?

But no. A terrorist's favorite friend wants to protect them. Even from themselves.

[Update:] One of my favorite Israelis from our favorite new country, the EU (snark) brings up this spine-tingling image. All I can see is a scene from a very horrible monster flick.