News for Speakers’ Corner, Sunday 4th February

“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.”
Andre Gide
1. Although Speakers’ Corner is a place for discussing controversial issues, some topics are simply out of bounds. Some things should never be said, by anyone. Today, Helmut crossed the line. He said things unspeakable. He said the game of soccer was a better game than Australian Rules football and Rugby League football. And he gave his reasons.

A Speakers’ Corner Committee will be formed to thrash out what needs to be done about this breach. This cannot happen again.

Meanwhile, here is a lookalike of the miscreant.

2. The fellow who erected this sign insists he is not mad, and claims he has a certificate to prove it.

Repent at Speakers’ Corner!

3. Mr B complained about how his grasshoppers “didn’t get it”, yet for half an hour he refused to explain what it was we weren’t getting. Talk about frustrating! Then, when he finally told us what we weren’t getting, he then accused us of still “not getting it”! Holy moly. Someone cruelly, but perceptively, suggested that perhaps Mr B wasn’t “getting it” at home.

So, what was it that we “didn’t get”, even though he has told us week after week? Answer: that nearly everything is make-believe, and we should be aware of that, and if our wacky make-beliefs disable us, we should drop them.

That’s what we had to put up with for one interminable hour.

Straight afterwards, Mark the grinner stood on the Ladder of Knowledge and in three brief minutes succinctly summarised Mr B’s point.

6. Up on the Ladder of Knowledge Mirko patiently explained to his enthralled listeners how photosynthesis creates water. Poor Uncle Pete, who has only 20th century science to draw upon, kept insisting Mirko was wrong. Yes, there are none so blind as those who will not see.

Trees making water with photosynthesis.

7. Governments and their departments should not simply issue requests, says Mr B, they should also give reasons. A simple example: instead of simply telling us to not feed the birds, the sign should also explain why we shouldn’t feed them.
The same goes for governmental decisions. Governments should explain in writing how they arrive at their decisions.

Another example: eight months ago Mr B wrote to both the Refugee Council and the Department of Immigration with six questions. He is still waiting for a reply. He says that if government departments took the time to answer questions from the public (form letters would suffice in most instances) then people might gain a greater understanding of a situation, and feel less frustrated and combatitive.Cynics pooh-hooed the idea.

Which sign do you think is more likely to receive a compliant response?

8. Other subjects discussed:– The two types of happiness, and how they evolved. For more about this see Mr B’s website.

– Many non-human primates have communicated well with researchers, but not one has asked a question! (Have the researches given them the opportunity?)

– We heard the ancient fable about an ageing Chinese emperor looking for a successor. Although the fable was well received by Mr B’s grasshoppers, Uncle Pete, still reeling from the intellectual drubbing he had received from Mirko, found a flaw in it.

– Mr B showed us how male human brains are different from female brains, and reminded us that the brain is our biggest sex organ. From there he tried to prove that we should judge a person’s sex not by their genitals, but by the structure of their brain. Peter the Younger explained why he was wrong.

– We looked at loneliness and compared the merit of nuclear families with close extended families. Which would enrich the soul more?