Friday, 28 March 2014

Puppy Mother's Day

I have blogged about the boy's attitude to Mother's Day before - and this year they seem much 'cooler' about the whole thing - or so I thought...

As you know, we became the proud owners of a little puppy on Sunday and she has been absolutely fine. She tends to chew everything, but I think thats common for most puppies. Oddly enough, although we have had other dogs (and still have an older one) they have all come from rescue centres, so this is our first 'puppy experience' and its a definite learning curve!

When we went to pick her up I was concerned as to how the puppy would travel in the car, so had taken a box, lined with newspaper for the journey.

Of course, I had forgotten that my eldest son is practically an animal whisperer - they all love him - he sat in the car with the puppy on his lap and she went immediately to sleep and travelled like that all the way home.

Whilst we were coming home we discussed a name for the puppy. I was opting for Toffee - as she is caramel coloured, Papa wanted Daisy (no idea why - probably a Downton Abbey type thing - he always identifies with 'below stairs'), TJ wanted Maisie and KC suddenly said, "We should call her Gracie, after her mum."

I said that I didn't think that was a good idea, that puppies should have their own names.

To which he replied, "But we are taking her away from her mum - she might never see her again, surely she will want to remember her." I caught Papa's eye and we both knew this was one of those conversations - a rare moment where KC talks about his Mum.

The door had been opened, by him, we decided to let him walk through it.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well," he said, "I can remember when TJ and were taken into care. TJ cried and cried but I didn't. I knew I had to be brave - the lady in the car said I had to be brave, just like the puppy. I didn't cry I just stared out of the window while the lady held TJ. I wish I could have slept like the puppy did. But I was very scared that I wouldn't see my Mummy again."

I was a bit shell shocked - this was massive. I had only ever heard KC talking like this once before when he was telling our best friend's son what it was like to be adopted and how scary it was to suddenly have to go to a new family. Here he was talking about the puppy but essentially telling us about himself.

TJ was indignant, "I didn't cry!" he said,.
"Yes you did," said KC, " you cried a lot - but you always cry a lot."

"Every time we went to a new foster carer TJ would cry and I would stare until we got there." They had an number of moves but luckily they were with their final foster carer for a long period of time, which allowed them to settle.

"I just want to call her Gracie so she can remember her Mum", KC went on, "It is Mother's Day this week after all."

Papa and I agreed that as it was the boys' dog then they both had to agree on a name. "I want to call her Gracie too," said TJ - so that was it. Gracie came home with us.

I didn't think Mother's Day was such a big issue this year but on Monday I got a call from KC's school - there had been a Mothers Day assembly and he was obviously distressed as each of the Year 6 children got up and said how amazing their mother's were. I asked KC about it later and he said, I was only crying because everytime they talked about their mum's I changed the word to Dad in my head and I thought of you - and that made me cry."

Top 100

Feel free to buy me a coffee if you like this post ...

Subscribe To

About Me

Writer, Actor, Director - at the moment Blogger for the blog '4relativestrangers' based on our lives as a gay family formed through adoption. Have finally completed the book of the same name and am waiting to see what the future brings!