For something that you claim to want more than anything else, it’s amazing how quickly you find yourself wandering off the path to its accomplishment.

You’ll start on Monday, right?

Or you’ll do it “someday”.

The last time I checked, someday wasn’t a day on the calendar.

There’s something standing between you and your life, the life that you deserve.

The question is: What the heck is it?

I had wrestled with this very question for years. However, at first it had more to do with others than me. I wondered how in the world could someone spend hundreds of dollars a week for personal training only to leave the gym and return to a life of sugar and alcohol binges.

How could a client pay top dollar for my coaching, run expensive lab tests, and set goals with such earnest enthusiasm only to commit unremitting acts of self-sabotage?

To say one thing and DO nothing.

My friend Blue has an awesome definition for integrity. Integrity is the diligence to do the deed after the emotion of the moment has passed. It’s doing what you said you’d do when no one is looking.

That’s deep.

Emotion can be a flight risk, walking out without a moment’s notice.

Here today. Gone tomorrow.

It’s how we execute our action plans absent of emotion that sets the achievers apart from the dreamers.

This past year has been quite a journey. A lot of reflection and introspection has taken place. As I took a hard look at myself, I began to see a lot of what drove me up the wall with my clients resided within me.

Lofty goals without action.

Recurring self-sabotage.

Like they say, the things that bother you most about others have more to do with you than them.

Of all people I should be the last to judge another for not following through on their intentions. I can relate.

I’ll be honest. I have three unfinished e-books right here on my laptop. One is three-quarters done. The others are maybe 30-40 pages away from completion. I start. I stop. I start. I stop…

The closer I get to completion, the distance to the finish line moves further and further away. It’s weird. I’m like that weight loss client who drops five pounds, starts looking and feeling better, and then goes back to his or her old habits. But not by choice. I don’t think anyone actually decides to sabotage themselves. It happens unconsciously.

Realizing my shortcomings, I spent many days at seminars sitting on a rock hard chair for hours on end learning about my stories, rackets, strong suits, and act. You may know what I’m talking about. Maybe not. All I’ll say is that it’s not a cult. It’s actually a very effective method for moving beyond your own bullshit (pardon my french), getting complete with the past, and understanding that you are in control of the possibility that is your life.