September 29, 2008

It's approximately 11.56 am now. Oh well, today's papers are Physics/Chemistry and Maths Paper 1, all in a day! I know that other schools, or other classes are experiencing like 3-5 papers a day (I think..), but seriously, the Cambridge setters or whoever it is, should cut us some slack! I was already losing my concentration during the Maths Paper 1 and most of the time, I'm staring into blank space. What I'm saying is.. Leave one examination date specially for one particular subject.

Talk about papers..

The Physics paper was so darn easy.. I already estimated 19/20 for the MCQ section, and roughly 19-22 marks for Paper 2. That brings about a estimated total of 38-41 marks. Frankly speaking, I had never gotten a 19/20 for any kind of MCQ before. I was getting more borderline passes instead. But NEVERTHELESS, it's one of my biggest accomplishment of all time. Of course, I have to thank Mr Chan for making me stay back after school, you know, his "system" whereby if you failed his class test, you have to stay back after school till 5 or 6 pm. That helped me totally. It's like the facts and formulas are already embedded in my brain. It's just awesome.

Chemistry paper was mediocre. Wouldn't guarantee a high pass, most probably a borderline pass, like 25 - 27. To sum it up, I'm already getting like 61+ marks for Combined Science, which is B+ I think? Hopefully, it would be B3, so that I can take a load off my shoulders for a bit.

Okay, let's head on to the biggest bitch on the block. Maths!Maths was a partial murderer. With its Algebra questions, I almost wanted bang my head on the table and hope that it was all over. Lucky me, the Algebra didn't conquer the whole damn paper, otherwise I would have been defeated. There were some questions that appeared rarely, which makes it not a difficult paper, but more like a recap on basics. Basics like, Integers, LCM, Bisectors and Ratio. Overall, it's a rather easy paper, but still, it's an inversed proportion. The easy it is, the harder it is as well, judging from personal experience. =D

Alright, so 3 papers down, 3 more to go.History is on, this Thursday. I'm not planning to pass History, but since Mr Leong gave the History students some self-prepared notes (I think? Cause' I remembered seeing, "Thanks to Boon Keat or something"..) I'm just gonna flip through the pages, and just try to memorize some of the model answers. Gosh, I hate memorizing..

Maths Paper 2 is the shit. It's a much higher conversion of marks, compared to Paper 1. Upon conversion, 1 single mark could equate to 2-3 marks (I think). So, Paper 2 is PRECIOUS! Besides, Paper 2 is much easier.. Think of Simultaneous Equations, those juicy 4 marks. And if there's a graph to plot, another 3 more marks.. Probability questions, aww, just sweet. Not to mention, Cumulative Frequency! In conclusion? Paper 2 owns Paper 1! Paper 1 is a noob.

Whatever it is, guys! Just do your best. Reap what you sow. (I hope this idiom is used correctly.. LOL)

And lastly, just want share some videos. Haha, maybe to occupy you during the "2 days holiday"!

September 27, 2008

Early in the morning, I went out with my mum to the Immigration & Checkpoints Authority (ICA) to renew my passport's expiry date. It took faster than I expected, I even thought that there was a need for new photographs of myself. Haha, in the future, I can go there myself!

So today, after reaching home, I just studied Maths for the whole afternoon. As I said, if I want secure a spot in Secondary 5, I have to rely on my best 2 subjects, and perfect them. Currently, the 2 subjects are Maths and D&T. I have no problem getting an A in D&T, all that's left for D&T is the theory paper which comprises 30% of the coursework. The other 70% goes into the folio that I've been working on for months, and I'm getting very good responses from it too, so it's pretty much settled. For Maths, I still have trouble understanding Algebra and Co-ordinate Geometry. Gonna practice it again tomorrow, and I'm settled for a B, or my goal, A2.

If I ever move on to Secondary 5, I have to sacrifice work, game time and sleep time to practice Humanities and Chemistry. I have no problem in Physics already. Humanities is the bitch, and Chemistry is just so-so. If I can go into Secondary 5, I'm gonna mug like mad. Haha.

Tomorrow will be another.. tiring day.But fret not, my maid's cooking spaghetti!One of my favorite dishes!It's considered good luck to me! So thank you so very much!

That's all for today!And.. I hope this skin isn't causing anyone problems yet. If it does, please tag!

September 26, 2008

Awww.. I'm having a cold.Yeah, today morning was like.. some rain storm or something. I assumed that it would be some typical rain. But I didn't expect it to be that heavy! Practically everyone in 4D that came today got drenched all over, a few lucky ones didn't get drenched as much. We were allowed to air our shoes and be barefooted. Somehow, it seemed like a present from heaven. Man, being barefooted is kinda luxurious in a weird way. Even the school is giving us luxury, extra clothes, towels and some others that I did not catch. Whatever it is, today is kinda memorable. HAHA!

Well.. There isn't nothing special today. I'm just doing self-study most of the time.

Haha, don't call me emo or anything. This is me. I'm alone most of the time.

My mother had to work from day to night, working her butt off. Everytime I reached home, I go into my room and just do my usual stuffs. I did so much things alone, like solitaire, watching people downstairs, staring at clouds and yeah, just a boring yet simple life. At school, it's hard adapting to my friends, because most of them speaks Chinese, and I'm better at English than Chinese, so pretty much of the time, I'll mind my own business and just stare into blank spaces. This is what you would call a language barrier. It's not my fault that my Chinese isn't on par with my friends, I even tried to improve it.

My state of lonliness, called solitude, first happened when I was in Primary school. It was an all boys school. I wasn't the kind of dream boy, handsome guy or something. I was fat, tall and everyone just seems to depise me because of that. I remembered all the bad things that happened. I had no good friends, I have friends, but time in time, they backstabbed me and I was lonely for 2 years (Primary 5 and 6). I punched the wall, to get tougher and so that I could fight them when I was picked on. That's the reason why I'm quite a violent guy. But I use my fists to protect people and myself. When I was in Primary 5, I suffered punches to my arms and back for almost a year. I could not fight back, because it was like 2-4 people sparring on me. That's another reason, why I don't feel pain when I got whacked on the arms or the back. It's more like.. used to it or immune to it already. I was the only one of the few who went to Normal (Academic) after the PSLE. I was being laughed at, parents of other children staring at me, telling their children to forget me as a friend. That's where, my 6 years old Primary education ended. Those were the worst years I ever had.

Just when you're wondering, yeah, I got my first blog address from this incident. If you want to visit it, please do. Click here. Honestly, it's not chronologically reliable, because I really have a bad memory. At least, I tried. =]

I entered Gan Eng Seng School. Thinking that I'll start a new life, and be happy all the way. Secondary 1 was good, I had the most fun then and everyone was so cheerful. I really missed those times. All good things come to an end, at Secondary 2. It was mild, the changes were clearly visible. Till the day I retained, life wasn't going as what I wished. I entered 3D then, everyone was so friendly, and I really loved the warmth. But.. again, all good things come to an end, and day by day, it just gets worse.. Right now, my class isn't a whole already, it's split up into parts. For me, I'm just a standalone, wishing for the impossible, sweeping the class, lying to myself. Everytime I see friends fighting, it just hurts me. Once there was good friends, and now, just despicable. If I had a choice, I rather stay on as a Secondary 1 kid for the rest of my life. Those were the best memories, seriously.. Till now, I'm still a loner, but mildly happy.

I always head home, alone. In the bus, I'll just stick myself to a seat for an hour, until I reached my home. I have no close friends living next to me, so I have no company at all. I hate taking the MRT because of the seats are taken up most of the time and I had to stand. I hate standing, man.. Buses have scenery, stare at different kinds of people everyday and frequently, a good air-conditioner. Haha, don't blame me for being this. I'm a boring person, and a simple one. No doubt, my life's been filled with solitude and lonliness but at least, I find ways to entertain myself and still be happy.

I'm just hoping to find a friend, who is same as me. Maybe in the future? I don't know.. But, if he/she really exists, he/she would definitely be my best friend. Hoping to find you, one day..

Well.. It's getting late. Not gonna sleep yet. Gonna try and study Maths and Chemistry for awhile. I'm just gonna do my best for the N levels and see how's the outcome like.

2 days left to the N levels. Everyone mug hard for the last 2 days! Good luck!

September 25, 2008

A big thank you to everyone who cheered me up, tagged me and contacted me. I'm alright, somehow. But fret not, I won't be a foolish asshole to jump off a building just because of life problems. I have to admit, everyone changed in one way or another. Starting life afresh seems to be the best solution, and yet too late. I guess everyone needs time to mature, understand and respect everyone. Time is the best solution..

Still.. It won't be easy to forget the past. A good life always comes with a bad memory, and good health. Bad memory to aid you in the faults that you have committed in the past and good health, of course, to enjoy life to the fullest. And lastly, it takes a lifetime to forget her, so don't force me. Heh.

So, examinations are starting next Monday. 3 papers in a day, oh my goodness.. It's not gonna be stressful, but instead, tiring. Somehow, this time table is screwed up. Why clash 3 papers in a day? The worst shit is that, Maths Paper 1 is on Monday and the Paper 2 is on another day! Oh man.. Meaning that, we have to revise fully for Paper 1, and another full revision for Paper 2 for the other day? I'm sure that Cambridge is not messing with us. The past N levels have been a breeze and a disappointment for many after their O levels. When they mean that the current N levels will be hard, I'm sure they do meant HARD.

September 24, 2008

You know what. I just had the worst day of my life. It's kinda like multiple problems stacking up on each other, and just toppling all over. I'm bottling up my fears to let it out on a perfect day, but I didn't expect it to be today. Suying's death.. My health problems.. My family problems.. My studies, it just feels so heavy. And just right, a pencil case came flying straight into my penis, and fuck, it was the limit. I just broke down, not caring about other people's thoughts. Somehow, crying seem to be the best way to let out stress. I don't really care about people calling me a crybaby. I don't need pride, all I need to be is to be genuine and true to myself.

During recess, some guy even have the cheek to say her name in front of me. Seriously, haven't I suffered enough? Her loss was already bringing me down to my lowest, and I have to get even lower? Ever since her death, I have cried buckets, and buckets of water, and I still have to cry even more? Have you guys ever experienced losing a loved one? It's so painful, you wish that you could just commit suicide to ease the pain. And she's the only friend I had who recognizes my inner self, not caring about my physical appearances. She's the only one who loves me for whoever I am. This is what love is all about.. Our love knows no boundaries. So please.. For the final time, I wish that everyone can respect me by refraining from using her name. Respect me and I'll return the respect to you.

After I chased someone around just when CD is starting, I felt a pain in my belly. Which made me weak and vulnerable. Guys.. Please give my belly a break. Do you really want me to die of internal bleeding then you guys will be satisfied? I already recovered during July, no internal bleeding anymore. The problem came back when my belly got rammed.. Till now, the smell and the pain is unbearable. A surgery is needed to make a full cure of this problem, but I haven't met the surgeon yet, maybe after the N levels. So please.. Please leave my belly alone. You can punch, kick and smash my arms, legs, neck or head for all I care, but not my belly..

Sorry for creating a commotion in class.. I'm just really stressed.

And the counselor really helped me a lot. Thanks!

For now.. Can we make the best of our remaining days in school? I'm heading into ITE, no matter what result I have. I just feel that I'm more suited there than having to start revising all over again. It's still a dilemma, but hopefully I'll make the right choice.

September 23, 2008

Once again, my belly bled again. I don't know why, but it's affecting my whole body. I can't describe the feeling, but it just feels like hell. The smell of it, just irks me. That's why I'm getting away from people, so that they won't feel irritated by the smell. I'm gonna feel like an outcast, once again. Oh well, it can't be helped. I'm one unlucky soul to be infused with this son of a bitch.

School today sucked so bad, I felt like snoozing throughout the day. I was having second thoughts about going into Secondary 5. Lots of things went through, but two in particular. Firstly, I detested the thought of having to do Humanities again in Secondary 5, even if I got promoted, I'm not sure how well I'm gonna do for Humanities in the O levels. Secondly and finally, my friends. I hate to leave my friends in order to move on to ITE. Even though it's only been 1 and a half year we had together, I still feel the bond and closeness with them. Sigh, why let society decide our future? I really don't see a need for Humanities in designing courses, yet I'm forced to study it. Yes, it helps you to make clever rebuttals and clear explanations, but the need for memorizing and so much more, just makes it a really tedious kind of subject.

The first period for today was Mother Tongue.. Boring as shit. The Chinese students were given worksheets for them to do. Some people slept, some people were quietly revising their work and I definitely was revising. I stared around when I was sick of revision, studied my friends' body language and behavior. It's really interesting, because there's so much reactions happening. The atmosphere in class today seems really.. Hmmm, how should I say it.. A clash of emotions and laughter, seems that way though..

The next two periods were Maths. Once again, I'm having the same thought that I had during Mother Tongue. Every single time I stare at an Algebra question, my mind starts race through millions of thoughts. Whether should stare at another Algebra topic in Secondary 5 or just go to ITE. In fact, I heard that ITE isn't a bad school, or rather.. institute. I read about a person's review on the ITE, read about it here. But fuck, my mind's in a dilemma right now. There are so many advantages and disadvantages of both choices, it's so hard to decide.. Oh my goodness.

Then it was Chemistry. It's true that Miss Mah doesn't show any commitment in teaching us already, but there's no reason why we should give Science up. But honestly, there are times that her monotonous voice can make me doze off like a finger snap.

Recess was next. As usual, sat on top of the teacher's console and just watch friends play their card games. I was listening to songs too.. Heh.

D&T was next. Nothing much though. Mun Tat loves to criticise Siraj lately. Haha, that's his retribution for bustering other people! Of course, I always get a share. Mun Tat practically criticised my mum's name throughout the lesson. Sigh, I wanted to take it lightly, but.. he's a good guy actually. I hate it when a particular guy laughs at you, he feels awesome, but if he gets laughed at, he doesn't feel good and switched to emo mode. So much for the lack of compassion and respect huh.. Being a Gessian is nuts, not everyone could possess the school values, what's the point of even placing the banners there. Even if you possess at least half or more of them, it's not like people are gonna recognise you for your efforts. Like they always say, the good will be rewarded.. Honestly speaking, I could understand why there are more defiant, rude and badass people out there than good ones. Need I say more?

After school, I went to the canteen to have my lunch. Suddenly, Chungaik came from behind and scared the shit outta me. And then came Hock Zheng and Boon Keat. Well, apparently, they are heading home and they are waiting for me. Haha, feel so "touched" everywhere (John's dirty thoughts). Boon Keat headed to the west side gate, while I walked with the rest to the other side gate. Exchanged good-byes and I headed for Justin's house for tutoring.

Damn, I was tempted once again by Rock Band 2 in Justin's house, but nevermind, school work comes first. After around 5 pm, I finally finished my tuition. Went to his gym to punch. I was feeling really stressed, and could not stop punching. My hand hurts right now, but it's part and parcel of boxing. Well, at least, I let out a lot of steam and felt awesome again. Went back home soon after.

Nowadays, I'm hiding my personal feelings. Dare not say it out to anybody. I guess I'm gonna do this for a few more years.. Can't understand why people say that a year is short. I always feel that a year is TOO LONG, and many things could happen then. Sigh, once, a good friend of mine, by the name of Rachel, told me that what's the point of caring when you do not get cared. Yeah, it's pretty true, but I don't know why. I just want to care, and care, and care even till the day I die. I guess that's a special trait of me. But most people I see doesn't like to receive my care, most probably because I'm a bad-looking person, with a huge flabby stomach and fats everywhere. So much for that, I'm just a sucker for appearances and love. But fuck, I'm still living and that is all that matters.. Is it?

Oh and I think I wrote the most shit for today. Sorry for the huge walls of texts! T_T

And here are the lyrics for my blog song.

Matchbox Twenty - Unwell

Lyrics:

All day staring at the ceilingMaking friends with shadows on my wallAll night hearing voices telling meThat I should get some sleepBecause tomorrow might be good for something

Hold onFeeling like I'm headed for a breakdownAnd I don't know why

[Chorus]But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwellI know right now you can't tellBut stay awhile and maybe then you'll seeA different side of meI'm not crazy, I'm just a little impairedI know right now you don't careBut soon enough you're gonna think of meAnd how I used to be...me

I'm talking to myself in publicDodging glances on the trainAnd I know, I know they've all been talking about meI can hear them whisperAnd it makes me think there must be something wrong with meOut of all the hours thinkingSomehow I've lost my mind

[Chorus]But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwellI know right now you can't tellBut stay awhile and maybe then you'll seeA different side of meI'm not crazy, I'm just a little impairedI know right now you don't careBut soon enough you're gonna think of meAnd how I used to be

[Chorus]But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwellI know right now you can't tellBut stay awhile and maybe then you'll seeA different side of meI'm not crazy, I'm just a little impairedI know right now you don't careBut soon enough you're gonna think of meAnd how I used to be

Yeah, how I used to beHow I used to beWell, I'm just a little unwellHow I used to be (a little unwell)How I used to beI'm just a little unwell

September 22, 2008

Chasing after the Sun, is like chasing after you. It's a never-ending race.~I still think of you, even if you're in heaven.

As the title states, I'm having dizzy spells during PE lesson. Sorry Chungaik and Derrick, but I have to push myself in order to prove that I'm not useless in the team. Although my belly is bleeding literally, I still carried on. After the game finished, I slowly walked up and yeah, felt like an old man walking for 100 years back to class. [/endsarcasm]

Anyway, I drank lots of water and relax my soul. The bleeding was pretty bad, I have a strong feeling that it's because I'm obese. I'm really gonna exercise a lot during the holidays. Gonna have a 3 months Basic Military Training, haha.

I had my CLB oral in school today. It was pretty hard, considering it that it's just CLB. Damn, the tester didn't gave any chances. Shooting me with complicated Chinese words. But I really hope that she is satisfied with my performance, at least, just a borderline pass. It always seems that the easier the subject is, the harder it is. Kinda like an inversed proportion I guess?

Anyway, here's a song for you readers to enjoy.I kinda got addicted to it when I first listened to it.

Leavin' - Jesse McCartney

Hey baby girl, I’ve been watching you all day (all day, all day, all day)Man, that thing you got behind you is amazing (amazing, amazing, amazing)You make me want to take you out and let it rain (let it rain, let it rain, let it rain)I know you got a man, but this is what you should sayWhy won’t you tell him that

I’m leavin', never to come back againYou found somebody who does it better than he canNo more making you cry, no more them gray skiesGirl we flying on that G-5, G-5

And we're leavin', never to come back againSo call your shorty and tell him you found a new manThe one that so, so flyThe one that keep you highHave you singing all night like, like

Now if I talk it girl you know that I'ma walk it out (walk it out, walk it out, walk it out)Man, I put my money, money where my mouth is (mouth is, mouth is, mouth is)'Cause you're the baddest little thing that I’ve ever seen (ever seen, ever seen, ever seen)So I'ma ask you one time if you got a manWhy don't you tell him that

I’m leavin', never to come back againYou found somebody who does it better than he canNo more making you cry, no more them gray skiesGirl we flying on that G-5, G-5

And we're leavin', never to come back againSo call your shorty and tell him you found a new manThe one that so, so flyThe one that keep you highHave you singing all night like, like

September 21, 2008

I just had a tiring spring cleaning today. Cleared loads of rubbish and mopped.

Anyway, here's my wallpaper for September before it ends.

I'm really hooked onto Call Of Duty 4 - Modern Warfare!

Surprised that I'm using Vista? Nope, I'm using a cheap method. I'm currently using a XP to Vista converter tool, which makes it look like Vista but not with the Vista components. I had the Yahoo! Widgets (That calendar and the day planner) installed which was bundled together with the converter. If you want the converter, here's a link. Don't worry, it's not a booby trap.

After cleaning up today, I went out for a walk. Just reminiscing the moments I had with her. God, I missed her so much.. Just sat around for awhile, watching the children having the time of their life playing tag. It's just great that everyone in my block is happy. Neighbors recognized me and greeted me politely, saying how big and tall I grown (Not to mention, FAT). Well, that's what my elders always say when they see me, hehe. So I went back up and slept through the afternoon.

Recently, I had a friend who lost his family. I knew him from Flyff (The second game I played the longest, and MapleSEA being the game I played the longest). He was a good guy but why must this happen to him? He told me everything in MSN, how his parents died. His father, who was on a business trip to Japan and his mother, who followed him died in a car crash. His father lost concentration on the road, not sure what illness his father had. But it was really tragic.. They lost a lot of blood and in the end, passed away. He was depressed, by the way he's typing (Usually he types with no repetitive dots at the end of his sentences). Sigh, friend, I hope you will get through this slowly and still move on with life. Your parents will protect you no matter what. Good luck in life and everything.

What's life becoming into? He's the 4th friend I knew who had lost family members. Just remember, parental love is the best love. It cannot beat a couple's love and a friendship bond. Parents are ones who brought you into Earth, and provided for all your neccessities. Even if your friends walk out on you, your parents will always be there to comfort you. That's why I always put family safety as my top priority, then friends.

Remember, everyday is a Mother's Day and a Father's Day. Don't fail to show your love for them!

That's all for today.

Thanks for visiting and may God bless you!

-Edit-

I've been addicted to this song that Rachel sent me for a long time.

One In A Million - Bosson

Lyrics:

You're one in a millionOhNowYou're one in a millionOh

Sometimes love can hit you every daySometimes you can fall for everyone you seeBut only one can really make me stayA sign from the skySaid to me

[Chorus]You're one in a millionYou're once in a lifetimeYou made me discover one of the stars above usYou're one in a millionYou're once in a lifetimeYou made me discover one of the stars above us

I've been looking for that special oneAnd I've been searching for someone to give my loveAnd when I thought that all the hope was goneA smile, there you were and I was gone

I always will remember how I felt that dayA feeling indescribable to meYeahI always knew there was an answer for my prayerAnd you, you're the one for me

[Chorus x 2]

In the beginning I was cool and everything was possibleThey tried to catch me but it was impossibleNo one could hurt me it was my gameUntil I met you baby and you were the sameAnd when you didn't want me I wanted you becauseThe funny thing about it is I liked the showI like it when it's difficultI like it when it's hardThen you know it's worth itThat you found your heart

September 20, 2008

I had so much fun today. I played Rock Band 2 in Justin's house and it rocked like hell. My hands are still trembling and my head dizzy from all that drumming and head banging. After that, went out with Chungaik, Derrick, Mun Tat and Kenneth to a LAN shop in the vicinity around People's Park. Man, the computers are high-end, and so the gameplay is pretty much smooth. I played games, which I had trouble playing in my computer, like Call Of Duty 4, Need For Speed Carbon and CabalSEA. We played Counter Strike and Call Of Duty 4 Multiplayer. Man, it's so addictive, and I'm going there again after the N levels. Seriously, the computers there are just awesome.. You could pretty much play any games, except Crysis and Far Cry 3 (Which requires the Vista version of DirectX 10, and most probably a 8800 GTX nVidia Graphic Card, think of all the costs.. Damn).

Some of the songs I played on Rock Band 2 (Of course not on Expert..)PS. Please don't listen if you are not a Rock, Metal genre fan.

Dream Theater - Panic Attack (My favorite)

Slipknot - Psychosocial

System Of A Down - Chop Suey

Of course, showing you the videos isn't enough. You must experience it yourself! It's so addictive! My shirt was already full of sweat before I came and played LAN. Drumming certainly is a tiring thing, but it's too fun!

September 19, 2008

Today was a really tiring day. I had a stiff neck, just stiffness everywhere. I'm really getting too old.. First leg cramps, then constant headaches, and so much more. I have health problems like indigestion, bleeding belly, and sometimes I had this *stabbed* feeling in my lungs, it hurts like mad. Sigh, I don't know whether I could like live long. All these health problems at such a young age seems like a bad sign. Whatever it is, I just gonna live everyday like it's the last. And when I stop breathing, I will know that people around me remembers me, one way or another. Haha.

Anyway, enough of that crap. I know you guys aren't here for those.

Well, today was alright actually. I pretty much slacked through the day, since there aren't much lessons. At least, Jiemin didn't cried as much as yesterday. Glad that you are better now! Stay strong!

The first two lessons was English. Haha, Mr Sandhu was in a exceptionally good mood today. I loved the part when I chased Chungaik, because he took my IC and EZ-Link card, and Mr Sandhu tried to stop me. I took the pack of tissue papers and whacked his head. Hahaha! I was laughing! But yeah, sorry Mr Sandhu! Before all that, we had a little spring cleaning in the classroom. At least, the class looks a little worthy of the Clean and Green Award.

After that, was Physics. We had another test, this time, it wasn't a surprise test. Surprisingly, I found the test really easy. I felt great. In the past, Physics was like a killer subject, comparable to Humanities. Right now, at this freaking moment, it isn't. I can beat it so easily, like a punching bag. I love the sense of accomplishment.. It's great! I can finally rest easy for my Science!

Next was Social Studies. Did nothing much, slacked around. Mr AJ kept on asking me to study History. The problem now is that there's no point in studying History now. I know what kind of marks I will get for my Social Studies. Even if I passed History, it's a wasted effort. I'm just gonna concentrate on every subject, except for Humanities.

Recess time. Watched friends, playing cards.

Mother Tongue was next. The Chinese teacher was rather pissed today, and Hock Zheng said that she's vending her anger on us. Seems like it, but she was happy after awhile. Such quick mood swings huh?

After a week of mayhem, tears, pain and sorrow, it had finally ended. I can have my peace. After this week, I'm gonna reserve all my days for pure revision. I'm gonna try to not log on into MSN but I'll still blog. If there's any study groups next week, please invite me. Thank you!

Well.. I'm gonna take my well-deserved sleep later.That's all for today.Thanks for visiting and may God bless you!

September 18, 2008

If we cannot live so as to be happy, let us least live so as to deserve it.

I just had a tiring day at school. Just don't want to mention it. It's almost like a scene being cut out from a drama serial into real life, that's how it is, with a little touch of rage and an outrage of emotions. Anyway, I was so tired today. I slept at 3 am, because I couldn't sleep at 12 mn. I ended up studying Maths during the late mornings.

Mr Sandhu came to the class today and encouraged us to consider ITE after our N levels. I'm not saying that he look upon ITE as a good school, but even if it has good facilities and stuff, it doesn't mean anything. See Gan Eng Seng? We can't even protect our own facilities, let alone advanced and spacious facilities. Still, never judge a book by its cover. The things I worry about ITE isn't the courses and facilities, it's the community.

Today marks the most "Sighs" I said and typed in MSN. Around 70 times. Sigh. A record to be remembered.

Anyway, I hadn't got the mood to blog much.That's all.Thanks for visiting and may God bless you!

September 17, 2008

With my eyes twitching and my leg that kept on receiving constant cramps, it's definitely a bad sign. The atmosphere at class today was pretty tense, even though we did wreak havoc during Miss Pang's period. I wish I can understand what my friends are going through, either a crisis or an obstacle. One person in particular, although I wish to not reveal the name, is going through a hard time. That person had countless problems, which are some of the worst I had ever heard. I'm going to try and help you in every way I can. That's what friends are for, giving each other a helping hand.

Man, I just couldn't study today.I had this leg cramp which sucked donkey balls, at around 3 pm. Right now, even as I'm typing, it hurts. I'm walking with my left leg lifted at 70 degrees. How pathetic. I do need to exercise soon and there's a jogging track being implemented in my neighborhood. Right timing!

But well, apparently. About today.We always have corners set up during recess.

First up. The current addiction.The Gambling Corner.Come here to get a gambling experience with no money at stake!

September 16, 2008

Oh man.. I'm really tired.I did not have my afternoon nap, and therefore, I'm freaking tired. I just didn't feel like snoozing off and laying my ass on the comfy bed.

Oh man.. What's happening to my friends?I had faced two damsels in distress. Someone who couldn't live life with simplicity. Someone who is having problems with the upcoming examinations. Someone who had his computer infected with Trojans. Someone who feel that he is jinxed. Someone who is having problems with love, the most fatal and tragic weapon ever. That's like 6 problems already from the past few weeks. Maybe I should apply for a counselor job or something. Really, I'm serious. I rather help people who are in distress. I'll check it out in the near future..

Oh man.. What's happening to me?I'm having some minor health problems, and yet it's irksome in a bad way. But I'm glad that the people around me have either ceased or lessen their criticism on me.

Oh man.. Why am I having flashbacks?So much memories, so much mistakes but no time to repent, no time to change. We all have to move on.

Oh man.. Why is life hard?Life is never hard. It's just the people's outlook of life that makes it hard. Why drink alcohol when you can drink water? Why smoke cigarettes when you chew on sweets? Why talk big when you have no guts to do it? Why love if you can't love? Why demand respect when you don't respect others? Why murder people when you can watch pornography everyday? Why think of death when you are alive? Why get so worked up over love like it's the end of the world? These are some of the few complaints about life I receive practically everyday. I only got one thing to say, you have one life, ONE SINGLE LIFE, waste it and you are done for. Life is precious. Period.

Oh man.. Why does the bad live longer than the good?One phrase. The world is biased. But anyhow, we still need to abide by a quote.Enough sorrow to keep you human.

Oh man.. Am I going to get flamed?Be it flamed or not, I don't care. This is me, I'm always expressing my honest views.

And finally.Advanced Technology = Even more epic failuresQuoted by Rachel yesterday night. =D

That's all for my mini rant.Thanks for visiting and may God bless you.

September 14, 2008

It's Mid-Autumn festival today! I was downstairs awhile ago. I was playing fireworks with some friends and ate tidbits. My mother bought me moon cakes as well, and they are durian flavored, pretty delicious! I was walking around the neighborhood, it's pretty cool! The wind shoots at your face, bringing about a cool sensation and the stars are so bright this evening. How I wish I had someone with me to enjoy this special occasion.. Oh well, what's past is past.

So today, I trimmed my hairdo, shaved my beard, shaved my armpit (Damn, it's fragrant) and exercised a bit. I never liked long, fuzzy hair. I know it looks really cool and handsome on a male, but I just can't stand hair strands dangling on my face. To be honest, it's really irritating and causes me to itch. I really respect those males with super long hair, it's amazing how they can endure hair strands covering their face. I'm sticking to my shaved sides and bulky top.

I also noticed while walking to the barber some elders in a bus. There's one elder, in particular, who had really fragile legs and walking really slowly. No one seems to be helping him, so I had no choice but to assist him. One thing I don't understand is, why isn't he staying at home? With his fragile legs and bones, he could collapse easily. Man, this world is turning WILD. I have to predict that his children are ignoring him or somewhat. How pathetic..

I've been sleeping for the past two days! Am I mad or what? N levels are like 2 weeks away, and I'm here, putting my butt on the comfy bed! Gosh, John, you should slap yourself. But seriously, when it gets to the afternoon, I get tired very easily. And when I want to take a short nap of an hour, it automatically extends to 4 hours. So much for body alarm clock.. Oh and do you know that our body works and reacts like an alarm clock? It's true! Somehow, I'm not able to possess that trait.. Back to old, cellphone alarm digital clocks..

So yes, 2 weeks is all I got left. But recently, during the weekdays, I had some pretty good results. One, for instance, is Mr Chan's Physics surprise test. Damn, it's totally not his style. It's too easy, really. It's my first time getting an 18/20 for MCQ. If only I can get this kind of marks for N levels, it's SO TEMPTING MAN! For a while, I felt really awesome. Kinda like the feeling while you are fapping (LOL!). Anyway, I will be getting my Section B marks next week, so I'm hoping for some unexpected marks!

And finally, my Maths. I'm getting better at Algebra, due to the revisions! I'm so happy! Mr Kung's other school's papers helped a lot too! I'm glad that he provided answers and solutions for most questions. But to be realistic, I'm only able to attain B3 at my current state, which is a HUGE IMPROVEMENT, OMG. Mug, mug, mug, mug, mug, mug and MORE MUG. I'm going crazy soon..

Well, that's all for today.School starts tomorrow.. Another week of mayhem. >_>

September 11, 2008

Today happened to be a bad day for some people. Oh well, without evidence, we can't make false accusations. But the loss of 2 really expensive equipments is such a pity. Maybe this time, you would learn to take care of your own stuff, especially items that are really expensive.

Yeah, I had a really eff-ed up morning today. I do not want to reveal this person's identity, because I want to prevent flame wars. I would really appreciate if you could at least say something more appropriate like a hello or something. It's practically everyday, you reached the area near the flagpole stand and you start criticizing me. Honestly speaking, I did not like it at all. In the first place, I already detested criticism. I'm not asking for a verbal war or anything, I just want you to change a bit. Everyone have their limits, and this morning, seriously, I felt like punching you, but I held back my fist to prevent commotions. So.. For goodness's sake, please, PLEASE, lessen on your criticism.

Well.. Today's the 11th September 2008.It's a painful and dreadful day for many in the USA.Why?Read this.September 11 attacks

6000 people died in the attack. To you, it might be a really small amount. But think, the amount of families grieving over the death of their loved ones, is really sad. I do not really care whether the USA president is at fault somewhere, but the bottomline is that innocent people died! How cold blooded can these terrorists be? Oh my God.. I just can't imagine myself in that situation. Although this is like 7 years ago, I just can't let it go. It's too tragic. Man..

Death.. is really bad. It just depresses our loved ones.One said that no one is human if they can't take sorrow.True. Very true.But is this sorrow enough? Are we even caring for our loved ones? Why are we individualists? Are we requesting mother nature to perform more natural disasters? Must the world be indulged in catastrophe THEN we'll start caring for our loved ones?

I know I said this before.. Everyday, you see your loved ones, you should go and hug them, thank life for making us safe till this day. I have already experienced the pain of losing a loved one, because I let her loose in a country where chaos and killers are present.

So guys, start caring for your loved ones. Because the ultimate reason is, death is inevitable.

September 10, 2008

It's been a while since I last updated! It's hard to update when I'm in intensive revision! So I felt it might be better if I just concentrate on studying. As I said last time, I cannot multi-task!

So anyway, for today's post, I just want to share my feelings with everyone.

Today's been a really meaningful day. Although not much happened, but it kinda struck me real hard. Okay, to start it off.. I woke up very early today, like around 4am. I don't know why, I slept at 1am last night, so I only had 3 hours of sleep. Somehow, I still feel energetic! I burned an hour of midnight oil for my Maths. Yeah! I'm planning to bring my Maths results into a whole new level. I'm seriously aiming for an A2 right now, since my English paper was screwed.

Speaking of English, Mr Sandhu came back to school today. He might be on medical leave the last few days. But when I saw him, I just felt that I let myself down. You know, the paper which I deem to be as the hardest I had ever done, whilst my friends just found it real easy. I just wanna rid of this problem out of my heart now. I always hated letting others down, that's just me.

The first two periods of today just made me feel rather.. outcast. It was History. Maybe it's just that History isn't my type of subject. Initially, I opted for Literature before getting promoted into Secondary 3, but my teacher said that the class was too small for learning?! In the end, I was forced into History, which I didn't like. Honestly, I hated memorizing notes and facts, although Science and Maths formulas are an exception. These 2 years of myself, learning History hasn't benefited me much. Right now, my Combined Humanities is screwed, literally. Social Studies was a bitch and I doubt History wouldn't be one either. So back to today, I just felt outcast. Seeing all my friends being able to write that much words in such a short amount of time, I feel defeated. I read my History book thrice already, still, nothing gets into my brains. I KNOW how to answer the questions and their formats, but the ultimate problem is my arsenal, which is lacking in knowledge. Maybe, just maybe, I'm gonna read the History textbook for the fourth time..

The next period was Chemistry. I had no problems in Chemistry. I even passed my previous two Chemistry examinations, Mid-Year and prelims respectively. But it just hurts to see that Ms Mah isn't really encouraging us because of her body language. Still, I appreciate her taking the time to print past examination papers for us to try, while some others treated it as garbage. This time, I'm hoping to get a really high pass for Chemistry, and to push up my Physics.

After Chemistry was Maths. I'm just glad that Mr Kung came back to help us in our final lap of 2 weeks. Mr Ganesh wasn't really a good one, honestly. I hope that the 6 failures in our class would pass their Maths, for Mr Kung's sake. As for myself, I'm gonna grind and mug like mad. Maths is probably the easiest to score right now. Oh, and I'm starting to like Algebra all of a sudden.. How unexpected.

Physics was next. Physics is also another subject that is easy to pass. The facts and formulas aren't hard to memorize and the questions are quite repetitive. Just have to be prepared for the random questions that will come out for the N levels. Mr Chan printed, too, a lot of papers for us to try on. Man, I'm loving all the teachers for their sacrificial effort!

Recess time! Watched friends playing dai di, and listening music on my w910i. Is it just me or is our class is turning more into a gambling den? Rofl.

CD was next! We had to do more surveys for the school. I don't mind doing surverys, but, is the school putting the results into consideration? I don't know.. I received my N level testimonial, which was pretty much overkill. I can't expect myself to carry that kind of comments, it's not really being true to myself. And my CCA grade, pretty obvious. The class started become a *snowball* frenzy, throwing paper balls at each other. That Chungaik, threw an accurate shot straight to my mouth and I became a laughing stock instantaneously. Thanks a lot, next time, I'll twist your ears again! RAWR.

English was next. But wait, THERE IS NO ENGLISH. A really big teacher, whom people said that it's a replica of either me, Derrick or Tajinder, WHAT A LOAD OF BULLSHIT! Anyway, we watched Devil Wears Prada and damn, the starting part of the movie was kinda erotic. The men in our class kept requesting for a replay, HAHA! C'mon, if men hated those scenes, we wouldn't be men at all. After all, you'll be seeing those *treasures* in the future! HAHA! Some people were watching, some people were playing dai di and some people are.. *hmm, can't elaborate*. YES, I can't even get to enjoy the movie, but at least, I get most of what the movie is trying to show. Enjoyed it and I might go watch it online.

After all that, I went home. Man, my nervousness disease is really getting worse. I can't even say a hello to Pamela and Vera, who are taking the bus with me as well. You know, this disease is gonna affect me in the future. What if, my boss is a voluptuous lady and I can't even face her. What if, I can't even face women and be a bachelor for life. Oh my God. I can't even tap the EZ-link card scanner for goodness sake. I was deeply humiliated. BUT WAIT, I did recall seeing *ENTRY OK* while tapping, so.. why is it that I did not tap it? Oh shit, I think I'm seeing things right now. Must be the 3 hours of sleep that affected me badly. I can't even open my eyes fully without my spectacles. But if I wear my spectacles, I will look like a PANDA! Damn all these dilemmas. I hope I'll rid my nervousness of women.

Heh, it's been a while since I wrote a really long post. I feel great! A sense of accomplishment!

September 5, 2008

Anyway, my blog's daily routine will be resumed on next Monday. From Monday onwards, tags will be replied as usual, huge wall of texts and updated daily. It seems that I'm denied improvement of English unless I blog, seems that way. Maybe John's build in a different way, HE HAS TO GODDAMN USE THE COMPUTER EVERYDAY! Okay, with that said, I have to go for my *holiday* at home.

So.. Today was a rainy day. SO? I mean, it's been raining forever! I have to admit, the chilly winds and the icy atmosphere is cool, but it's practically everyday that I'm trembling with my balls! My room ceiling feels icy cold, because every single time the rain water evaporates from the previous rain, THE NEXT BOUT OF RAIN ARRIVES! Sucks to live at the highest floor of a building, you get all sorts of special treatment. I'm glad that the neighbour, who lives below me doesn't whine like a jackass anymore. He's WAS a jackass back then, and will be one now and forever. I always give him the dull expressions and I don't give a HOOT about him. Fancy complaining that my air-conditioner is dripping water WHILE IT IS RAINING! How crazy is that? To add on, banging on my door like HELLO? There's a DOOR BELL beside the damn door, nincompoop.. Because of him, I hate most wealthy people now. Some wealthy people are good ones, but are a rarity. Bad people is bad.

I just hope he moves out some day, FAST.Douchebag..

Enough of frustrations!I gotta go!Thanks for visiting and may God bless you!

September 4, 2008

Okay, I'll take back my words, "..last blog entry before the examinations". The rest of the examinations will be held on 290908 onwards. So I'm still gonna blog!

Oh my goodness gracious..

The English paper today was ridiculously difficult. Some people may think otherwise, but this might be the hardest paper I have ever done! Some of the UYOW (Use Your Own Words) questions just doesn't make sense, or maybe it's just me! I was able to finish it though, with my summary ending at 129 words. I left the school, feeling rather irked, since English determines whether you are eligible for Secondary 5 or ITE.

Oh well, might as well be optimistic. No use dwelling on results.290908 papers, you will be fucked.

Yesterday, when it rained, I noticed red skies hovering the the dark, dead night. Heard people saying how red skies actually describes apocalypse, calamities and disasters. Still, I checked the Internet, and red skies meant rain in the morning and fine weather in the night. ZZZ, those people scared shit out of me!

Anyway, that's all for today..Thanks for visiting and may God bless you!