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My daughters father is in jail up to 20 yeArs

He was my first love i met him when i was 13 since then he was always in problems with the law most of our realatinship he was in and out of juvy. Now he is in jAil he has court tomorow and might give him up to 20 years. Me and him had a huge fight before he got cought (he was on the run like for a year) so since his been in jail i havent talked to him or anything i knw he got another girl pregnant before he got cought and shes been paying for lawyers and they are going to het married hes brother told me he asked for my adress but i dnt knw if to keep contact with him or not i kinda feel bad for him he is barely 22

I just hate the heck out of it when someone like that other poster says ummm.. u dont spell correctly. Who gives two turds?...

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes thank god. Lol i dont care english is my second language so i dont realy care lol. And thank you for the advise.

Quoting bribabyfever7:

Hey you know what thank god for her grandpa! (Ps...i dont care about ur spelling... some people are literature professors on here... loll) i think a lot of us believe those teen years we are supposed to get into trouble (although...i didnt... everrrr! Ha ha) yiu know and learn from it and we dont knoe that some people woll get into bad trouble and some change true, but others..... they just dont change. They continue to be ignorant and troubled... chalk it up to having a loving heart and high hopes. Definitely cherish your dad for being a good role model for her and giving her attention and esp. Helping you be a successful mom but what ever it takes succeed in all you do so that you can have a peaceful life and provide for your daughters needs and then some

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you I dnt think i would ever take her to see him eather i guess my mistake was staying with him in our teens when he kept Fu**ing up. But as soon as i found out i was pregnant maybe a little to late i left him and have worked hard to give her what she needs amd wants. And my baby has the best father figure i would ever want for her my dad.

Quoting bribabyfever7:

That's so good and i hope it continues to get better and better for ever......

I just would not ever take my child to see her "father" who does things to jeopardize their relationship and land himself behind bars for visiting hours to see him... my ex did this. And expected me to stay with him after lies and lies and lies. He went to prison and i said good bye-! I dont steal from people, do drugs, or anything criminally related so he needs someone who has his lying capabilities and criminal behavior qualities best of luck to them. Find a real Father figure for your beautiful baby

Quoting Anonymous:

Thak god me and my daughter already have a great life. And as i het older i hope its better too

Quoting bribabyfever7:

Say good bye to him.... like years ago. Make a life for you and your baby. A good life without criminalities in it..............

Thank you :). And i am sorry you went throgh all of that. Seems like you went throgh alot and i guess for my daughter the good thing is she does not remember him lets see what happwnds in the future and she gets older. And thank you again

Quoting WritingSpider:

I'm sorry you are going through this. You have a tender heart. That is a good thing. But you also have to remember that you can't dwell on these things. The best thing you can do is be there for your little girl as I am sure you will be. Pray for him. Don't get too wrapped up in feeling bad or crying. If you must do so for a few minutes then move on. Even if you must do so time and time again.

I know it's hard and I know people don't really "get it" that have never had a loved one in prison. Of course I would never go back around my dad after all he did to us for fear of safety - a child of abuse never forgets that there used to be an on and off button quickly pushed without realizing. But he was still my daddy and I felt bad for him. Even though he did it all on his own account. That just means that you are a special person.

My dad not only did things to us - he eventually shot himself. He lives with half his brain. But while in prison something seemed to CLICK finally. He was known as the prison "preacher". He finally got it was his fault. He prayed for other people and tried to tell them not to do what he did. There is redemption in even the most crappy of situations.

I will be praying for you and your family. CBN has a pray chat line that's great. Just hug that baby, have some ice cream and remember it will all be ok. God is super faithful that way I have found.

Quoting Anonymous:

Yeah he would tell me that when he would get locked up in juvy. And actually to me he was great just not to other people and hopefuly he changes his ways if not too bad for him and his family

Quoting WritingSpider:

My dad was abusive and went to jail for 15 plus years. The address is just because that's a BIG life line in prison. At least that would be my guess. He was, of course, not writing me, but my father probably went through 200 note pads. Mail day is very important. He probably wants to recieve and send mail to his daughter.

If you feel sorry for him, he must have some redeeming qualities. Perhaps this will open his eyes and make him the person God intended him to be. Sometimes we take WRONG turns like that and it takes something BIG like this to change our ways.

by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster
on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:32 AM

I know right! Lol

Quoting bribabyfever7:

I just hate the heck out of it when someone like that other poster says ummm.. u dont spell correctly. Who gives two turds?...

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes thank god. Lol i dont care english is my second language so i dont realy care lol. And thank you for the advise.

Quoting bribabyfever7:

Hey you know what thank god for her grandpa! (Ps...i dont care about ur spelling... some people are literature professors on here... loll) i think a lot of us believe those teen years we are supposed to get into trouble (although...i didnt... everrrr! Ha ha) yiu know and learn from it and we dont knoe that some people woll get into bad trouble and some change true, but others..... they just dont change. They continue to be ignorant and troubled... chalk it up to having a loving heart and high hopes. Definitely cherish your dad for being a good role model for her and giving her attention and esp. Helping you be a successful mom but what ever it takes succeed in all you do so that you can have a peaceful life and provide for your daughters needs and then some

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you I dnt think i would ever take her to see him eather i guess my mistake was staying with him in our teens when he kept Fu**ing up. But as soon as i found out i was pregnant maybe a little to late i left him and have worked hard to give her what she needs amd wants. And my baby has the best father figure i would ever want for her my dad.

Quoting bribabyfever7:

That's so good and i hope it continues to get better and better for ever......

I just would not ever take my child to see her "father" who does things to jeopardize their relationship and land himself behind bars for visiting hours to see him... my ex did this. And expected me to stay with him after lies and lies and lies. He went to prison and i said good bye-! I dont steal from people, do drugs, or anything criminally related so he needs someone who has his lying capabilities and criminal behavior qualities best of luck to them. Find a real Father figure for your beautiful baby

Quoting Anonymous:

Thak god me and my daughter already have a great life. And as i het older i hope its better too

Quoting bribabyfever7:

Say good bye to him.... like years ago. Make a life for you and your baby. A good life without criminalities in it..............

You are a dear. My pleasure to help. You hang in there! You and your daughter will be a'ok. :) Little girls with dads in the pokey have more than one thing in common . . . I think we all tend to turn out pretty good - tough cookies with sensitive hearts. :)

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you :). And i am sorry you went throgh all of that. Seems like you went throgh alot and i guess for my daughter the good thing is she does not remember him lets see what happwnds in the future and she gets older. And thank you again

Quoting WritingSpider:

I'm sorry you are going through this. You have a tender heart. That is a good thing. But you also have to remember that you can't dwell on these things. The best thing you can do is be there for your little girl as I am sure you will be. Pray for him. Don't get too wrapped up in feeling bad or crying. If you must do so for a few minutes then move on. Even if you must do so time and time again.

I know it's hard and I know people don't really "get it" that have never had a loved one in prison. Of course I would never go back around my dad after all he did to us for fear of safety - a child of abuse never forgets that there used to be an on and off button quickly pushed without realizing. But he was still my daddy and I felt bad for him. Even though he did it all on his own account. That just means that you are a special person.

My dad not only did things to us - he eventually shot himself. He lives with half his brain. But while in prison something seemed to CLICK finally. He was known as the prison "preacher". He finally got it was his fault. He prayed for other people and tried to tell them not to do what he did. There is redemption in even the most crappy of situations.

I will be praying for you and your family. CBN has a pray chat line that's great. Just hug that baby, have some ice cream and remember it will all be ok. God is super faithful that way I have found.

Quoting Anonymous:

Yeah he would tell me that when he would get locked up in juvy. And actually to me he was great just not to other people and hopefuly he changes his ways if not too bad for him and his family

Quoting WritingSpider:

My dad was abusive and went to jail for 15 plus years. The address is just because that's a BIG life line in prison. At least that would be my guess. He was, of course, not writing me, but my father probably went through 200 note pads. Mail day is very important. He probably wants to recieve and send mail to his daughter.

If you feel sorry for him, he must have some redeeming qualities. Perhaps this will open his eyes and make him the person God intended him to be. Sometimes we take WRONG turns like that and it takes something BIG like this to change our ways.

by Anonymous 15
on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:54 AM

1 mom liked this

Please do your child a favor and learn proper english!!! I can't understand anything you wrote. Move on past that scum bag and never have contact with him again. Go get a GED and educate yourself for you child. PLEASE!

Quoting Anonymous:

Thank you and good thing she didnt i left him when i found out i was pregnant and then he went to jail for another thing i dnt realy knw why shes seen him like 5 times and she does not remeber so am just not going to let him have contact with him until shes old enogh to decide her self but it does feel bad to think about the kids in this situation i knw it was my choice but i was way to young and in love but i got my head together and left him

Quoting mshill12:

I'm sorry :( My 2 older boys dad is in prison right now. Its hard on them. Thank God it is not going to be 20 years but he was facing 25. He pled out to 1 and 1/3 to 3 years because lawyers said he would prob lose in court. I believe he gets out in July but my kids are hurt. I am afraid that they even when he gets out wont have much of a relationship with him. They are 6 and 8. Daddy I believe has been away not for close to 4 years. Two different sentences. I am so sorry... If your daughter has a relationship with her father than I think maybe you may want to keep in contact for her sake and let her decide later but if not just let it go. Really it is to much for kids to handle. I feel so bad for mine and hate my ex husband so much sometimes for leaving them.

by Anonymous 16
on Jan. 28, 2013 at 2:57 AM

This. It's *caught!!!!!! And *aggravated assault!

Quoting Anonymous:

Holy cow... you need a dictionary. That post hurt my eyes. I can't read any of that without thinking that you are really uneducated. As far as the being in jail, if he did it, he deserves it.

Send me email updates about messages I've received on the site and the latest news from The CafeMom Team.
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