Mighty Ducks '95-'96 : Duck Soup

Everyone knows the New Jersey Devils proved they were the NHL's best last season by winning the Stanley Cup. And the Ottawa Senators proved they were the worst by hardly ever winning. But there's a lot more than that to the NHL. Here's how the Mighty Ducks see the league:

Easiest city to get frostbite waiting for a cab to go to dinner on an off-night: Edmonton; Runner-up: Winnipeg

Best ice: 1. Edmonton, 2. Winnipeg, 3. Toronto

Worst ice: 1. Anaheim, 2. The Forum (Inglewood, not Montreal). 3. The late Boston Garden in April, May or June.

Worst backup goalie seat (Shtalenkov): Edmonton. "The backup goalie sits where the Zamboni is. You're not just not playing, you're out of the game. You're sitting alone and fans are trying to get autographs-- during the game."

Favorite city to visit for last of a five-game trip when you're 4-0: Hartford; Runner-up: Winnipeg

Least favorite city for last of a five-game trip when you're 0-4: Detroit; Runner-up: Pittsburgh

Ewen ranks the NHL's best fighters: "I can't do that. It might start a fight."

Wilson, noted pacifist, ranks the NHL's best fighters: "I'd put Todd Ewen and Stu Grimson right up there. You have to say Bob Probert, if he's healthy. Marty McSorley, because he never goes down and he continues to fight year in and year out. He doesn't rest on his laurels. And you'd have to say Tie Domi."

Worst visiting dressing room: The late great Chicago Stadium. Dark, damp, crowded and roach-infested. "The first thing guys used to do when they got down there was shake out all their equipment," Ladouceur said.

Worst referee: "I take the fifth," Ewen said. "We like them all ," Ladouceur insisted.

Biggest irritant on Duck charters: Bobby Dollas; "He talks too much."

Best dressing room speeches: Ladouceur.

My Dad's role in Canadian politics simplified (by Chad Kilger): "He's like the referee of the House of Commons, keeping peace on both sides." Kilger's father, Bob, is deputy speaker of the House of Commons.