Anecdotes about Vegas, Low Stakes Poker, and the Characters Who Enjoy Both.

Thursday, November 5, 2015

"And Gabe Kaplan Raises...."

This took place a few months back in
Vegas, earlier in the year.It didn’t
take long for me to get noticed at this table.There was a young woman at the table who was obviously British, although
from the conversation I learned she was now living in the US as she had married
an American.The guy next to me was
visiting from Israel. And so at one
point, early on, when I made a raise, the Israeli said, “And Gabe Kaplan
raises….”A few people laughed at that,
and they seemed to agree that I looked like Gabe Kaplan.I’ve mentioned this happening to me before
(before they started calling me Costanza).I admitted that I heard this before, not
infrequently when I’m in a poker room, and that it didn’t bother me at all.

There was one exception.The British lady said she had no idea who
Gabe Kaplan was.A few of us tried to
enlighten her, mentioning his comedy background and his more recent connection
with televised poker.Meanwhile, the Israeli
fellow took to his smart phone to find pics of Kaplan.He found one that most closely resembled
yours truly (in his estimation) and held the pic of Gabe on his cell phone
right next to my face so the British woman could compare the two.I thought that was quite amusing.She nodded and concurred that I resembled the
ex-Mr. Kotter.

I didn’t play a hand for some time,
then, when someone had straddled UTG ($5), I made it $15 with Ace-5 of hearts.
Someone immediately said, “That’s the first hand he’s played.”Man, I hate that.There should be some kind of warning and/or
penalty for piping in like that.Congrats, sir, for noticing this.Use that information for your best advantage.But if other players have been less
observant, why the hell are you helping them?To me, this violates the “one player to the hand rule” and dealers
should tell the player to shut the ef up.Politely, of course.

Only got one caller—possibly because
of the other guy’s comment.The flop was
low, with one heart.I made a c-bet of
$20 and the guy folded, saying, “You must have Aces.” If only I could count on
them putting me on Aces every time I raised.

With Ace-King in the big blind, I
called a raise to $6.Five of us saw a
flop of Ace-Jack-x.I bet $20 and was
called in two spots. The turn was a blank and I bet $50, down to one
caller.Another blank on the river and I
put out $100 but no call.

In the big blind with King-6 of
spades, there was no raise and 5 of us saw a flop of Queen-6-2, one spade.I called $10 and we were heads up.The turn was a 5 of spades, I checked/called
$25.The river was a blank and this time
he checked.I said, “I only have a 6,”
and he mucked, saying, “No, you’re good.”O.K.

With Ace-2 of spades I called $8.Four of us saw a flop which had two
spades.I called $25 and we were down to
three.The turn completed my nut flush it
checked to me, I bet $75 and got one call.The river was a blank and I bet $100 and didn’t get a call.

The guy on my left had his wife behind
him, watching him play.They were
talking about going to dinner soon.Now
the wife had a low-cut top. It was cut low-enough to make me about 95% sure her
boobies were not gifts from Mother Nature.Whenever I see a guy with a wife whose got abundant after-market add-ons
in front, I have to restrain myself from asking the guy, “Did you buy her those
or were they part of dowry?”But of
course, being a gentleman, I said no such thing.

Anyway, I found myself with Ace-King
in the small blind and called a raise to $8, a few people had already called
the $8.The big blind, aka, the guy with
the wife who had the big fake boobies, made it $30.It folded back to me. The guy had only about
another $100 behind him, and I had him covered.I think the play there is for me to just raise him all in.But I couldn’t bring myself to do that.I wanted to see the flop first.So I just called.

The flop was King-9-8 and then I put
all my chips out.He said, “Well, I want
to go to dinner anyway…..Call.”And he
showed his hand: Ace-Jack offsuit.Really?I guess he figured Ace
would have been an out but he was obviously wrong.He would have had to have gone runner-runner
to win and he did not.So that was a
pretty nice pot.

With pocket 10’s, I raised to $10 and
had three callers.The flop was
Ace-King-Queen, two diamonds (and I did have the 10 of diamonds).I made a $20 c-bet which I think was a
mistake. With three callers and that flop, probably should have just checked. I had two callers.The turn was a low diamond and a guy shoved
for his last $15.The other guy called,
as did I.With all those high diamonds
out there, a four-card flush with my 10 might have been good.But the river was an Ace of hearts and I had
to fold to the other guy’s shove.He had
Ace-Queen for a rivered boat.The
short-stack just mucked without showing.

Then with pocket 5’s I called $12
after three others were in. I missed the flop and the preflop raiser bet
$16.The other two folded and with just
the 5’s, I decided to call.Just wanted
to float and see what happened.This
particularly player liked to c-bet almost every time and I didn’t think the
fact that he c-bet a four-way pot meant he necessarily had anything.The last two cards were bricks and there was
no more betting.He showed King-Queen
off, which did not connect with the board at all.When he saw my pocket 5’s that took the pot,
he said, “You’re good sir, nice call.”Heh heh.

I hung around to the midnite drawing
(didn’t hit it) and then cashed out with a $380 profit.Pretty nice session for a guy who looks like
Gabe Kaplan.

Edited to add: I should have thought to include this video originally. Thanks to one of my Facebook followers, Jon, for suggesting it: