We went to the Passion for Jesus Conference. I said that I would blog about my experience and all. So here I am, finally getting around to it. 🙂

I feel as if I have acutally been living for the Lord for only about 3 and a half years. I’ve been “saved” for 12 years. And what I mean by actually living for the Lord, is that I have given Him all of myself. I am ruined for anything else but Jesus Christ. I can’t live in compromise, and I can’t live in the world and Christianity. I choose Jesus. Nothing else will ever satisfy. And in the past 3 1/2 years I’ve become a completely different person. Oh please don’t get me wrong, I’m messed up and weak, but now I am letting God have His way with me. I’m leaning on Him and letting Him be strong in me. IHOP has had a HUGE impact in the way my life has changed. It is because God has used IHOP in my life. So I’ve been going to conferences and listening to sermons, and teaching and reading books etc…

But I really felt that even though I might hear some of the same things I’ve already heard or that I know at the Passion for Jesus Conference, God was going to do something. There were many amazing speakers and many amazing teachings.

Here is what stood out and what God is continuing to teach me:

1) The youngest Carr girl is Susanna. She is 10 and she is in love with Jesus! She blew me away with the things God was teaching her. She went to the Children’s Equipping Center during the conference. Every time she came back from her session, which lasted between 2-3 hours, she was bubbling with excitement over what God had done! She comes back excited to pray. She tells me how God spoke to her and showed her things. So God is doing something HUGE in the young generation. We cannot hinder the children from coming to Him. God speaks to everyone, even children. I love seeing Him move and what He is doing with those younger then me!

2) Mike Bickle spoke the first night on the First commandment. Which the Lord has been speaking to me about. And the thing that he said that impacted me and stood out was something like this: Most people in the prayer room believe that they are living out the first commandment when they are in the prayer room sitting before the Lord, and that they are living the second commandment out when they are outside of the prayer room. He said this is a wrong perspective. Yes, you are loving God when you are in the prayer room, but when you are in intercession for people, this is loving them. When you can spend hours praying for people, giving up your time because you believe that God is going to break in for them. Or giving up your time because you want God to break in on their situation. This is love. And when we walk outside of the prayer room and live our lives and we choose humility over pride, or we choose not to lust, or we choose to say yes to God in those situations when it is really hard, this is truly loving God…think about that. We have the wrong perspective of the prayer room. I know that I even do sometimes.

3) The Lord blessed me with the opportunity to sit in a Misty Edwards set in the prayer room. It was powerful and spoke to me about His love for me! And how He evaluates us on the heart issues and on how much we love Him. Not based on our ministries, or how many people love us, or how sucessful we are. It was powerful.

This is something that the Lord has been speaking to me about. I’ve been praying for the ending of human trafficking, I’ve been having dreams about it and I believe that the Lord is leading me to go on a missions trip to a country where this is a big issue. His session really impacted me because I realized how little compassion I really have on those who are in need. Those who are being oppressed and victimized. So my prayer and cry is that God would put compassion in my heart like He has. That I would pray for the issues that Jesus prays for. That I would weep over the things that He weeps for! Help me God! And I know that He will do it because it is His desire!

6) Live holy– walking out the sermon on the mount and keeping the purity covenant.

This is the Sacred Charge. I know that the Lord has called me as a forerunner. To prepare the way for the Lord’s return and to prepare the bride.

I have dedicated the next 10 years of my life to give myself wholeheartedly to this calling. “To not come up for air”. I will be 33 years old.

The next 10 years of my life are probably the years that will bring the most change. Possible marriage and children. But even in the midst of that, I will give myself to this charge. I won’t do it perfectly but I will continue to give myself to it with the grace and strength of the Lord.

Christian Perfection by Fenelon- I haven’t read this entire book yet, only because my wonderful friend Wesley, has a copy of it, and is reading it and every time he reads something that is amazing he gets me to read it and it blows me away! I also have not bought this book because it is an old book and trying to get it costs quite a bit. But I will do my searching and shopping in used bookstores so as to get the best value. 🙂 YOU SHOULD READ THIS BOOK!

Passion for Jesus by Mike Bickle- This was the first book that I read where I felt like someone else in the world understood my hunger for more of God. And it encouraged me that I could actually have more. This book helped bring understanding to me about Intimacy with Jesus.

Humility by Andrew Murray– We are all in desperate need of humility! This is a lifestyle that Jesus promoted over and over again in the Sermon on the Mount and the gospels. This book has so much insight into humility and what it looks like to be lived out!

*Disclaimer- I am not saying that I believe and agree and am saying you should believe everything in these books. They have some awesome things that are biblical and will encourage you to pursue the Lord, but as always search things out in scripture and don’t take anyone’s word for it but what the Lord says!*

The first Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of every month is the Global Bridegroom Fast. You can go to IHOP-AC’s website on the right to find out more about this fast.

The staff and interns at IHOP-AC have been reading the book “The Rewards of Fasting” by Mike Bickle. It has really been sirring my heart towards more of a hunger for Jesus and I just wanted to share it with you.

So I am just going to share what I have gotten so far out of the first 4 chapters. Basically I want more of God and fasting humbles us to receive God! Fasting reveals what controls us, therefore as we see what is in the way, we can repent and get rid of the things that are hindering us from having more of God! It is so beautiful, except that our western culture tells us to do the complete opposite. Our culture does not accept weakness. The more powerful and successful you are the better you are. Not so in the KINGDOM OF GOD! It is the UPSIDE DOWN KINGDOM! If we are truly living according to the Kingdom of God then our lives should look completely opposite of the world!

Fasting is voluntary weakness. You are making yourself weak by giving up food, therefore having to rely on God. As we say no to our flesh (which tells us to eat) then our spirits will be alive to hear from God. Romans 8:6 says “For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace!” How amazing is that! Fasting is a quick way to put the flesh to death and live according to the Spirit.

Every Christian should be living a lifestyle of fasting. Unless by the doctors orders you can not. Fasting is a value in the Kingdom of God. Matt. 6 speaks of 3 very essential things in the Kingdom of God; giving, praying and fasting. There ya go. There is your reason.

Fasting is also a way of mourning. In the Old Testament almost every reference to fasting is associated with mourning, and mourning over their sins.We should fast because we realize the depravity of our soul. We are sinners and we need God! We fast in mourning over our sins, asking for more of God’s presence. And as we humble ourselves in voluntary weakness, our spirits will be tenderized to the Holy Spirit, who searches the deep things of God, and reveals Jesus to us!

Jesus talked about fasting in Matt. 9:14-15. John the baptist’s disciples asked Jesus why He and His disciples did not fast. Jesus then talked about Himself as the Bridegroom! He said “The attendants of the bridegroom cannot mourn as long as the bridegroom is with them, can they? But the days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast.”

Wow. His disciples did not need to fast because HE WAS WITH THEM! We need to fast, in mourning because we should long for the RETURN OF JESUS!!! We want HIS PHYSICAL PRESENCE! We should be so lovesick for our Beloved that we fast and mourn for Him to return.

So all of this is convicting the crap out of me, why? BECAUSE I DON’T LIVE THIS WAY! My flesh so many times rules over my spirit. Ugh! Its really annoying! And I want it to stop! I want my soul, my mind, will and emotions, to come into submission to the Holy Spirit. I want to put my flesh to DEATH! So that my spirit may be alive and hunger for Jesus Christ!