An albino grizzly bear....Or is that a polar bear? Whatever! A big white bear jumps out of the snow and punches you in the face. It then tears off the costume to reveal to be ME! DUN DUN! I take the Thingy and hide it in Quickman's Laser Trap.

I manage to get out of the Laser Trap and utilize the Thingy Scouter (a scouter from DBZ that can home in on the Thingy) to find it in Godot's house where I find Jailbreaker and Godot looking closely at the Thingy stewing in....a cauldron of stew. I use force push to knock them both into the cauldron of boiling broth and the Thingy flies into my hands. I quickly shut the lid and set the temperature to Blue Giant Star. Then warp to Captain Hook's harbor in Neverland

There was a reason why it was deserted. It was taken over by The Flood. I fly on the infested island and blow away your infected body with a Hadoken. I'm a reploid so the Flood don't affect me. I take the Thingy from your charred remains and warp to my base on Mercury.

I get bored with the Thingy, so I throw it in the air for someone else to get. I then teleport to Gamefiend's base and rip his head off Sub-Zero style.

Me: Hmmmm, Gamefiend is dead, but he's gonna come back eventually. I have to destroy every last trace of him, and I know just how to do that!

I teleport just outside of Gamefiend's house, where his family just happens to be having a family reunion. I then fly up in the air and shoot a giant orb of energy at the house, blowing it up in a mushroom cloud. All that remains of the house and Gamefiend's family is a giant smoldering crater. I then teleport back to my underground base.

You get a really bad stomach ache and have to the hospital and get and operation. I'm the Doctor and once I have removed the thingy and cleaned it off. I take it to my secret laboratory to perform experiments on.

Suddenly, the lab explodes. It seems you forgot to carry the 2 in your equation. I take the Thingy, go to Nick, kill Fanboy and Chum-Chum, Big Time Rush, and True Jackson for disgracing Nickelodeon. I then go to Nowhere.

I go to Nowhere and find the charred remains of The Chicken from Outer Space. using a method too complex to describe in this post I resurrect it. In return for me resurrecting it it kills VG Addict and gives me the Thingy. I happily accept it and warp to the Cal-de-sac in which Ed Edd n Eddy are located.