It has been proposed that the present era of life on earth should be called the “Anthropocene” to reflect the human domination of our planet. However, an elegant, scientific-sounding term like “anthropocene” seems like a cop-out, a handy euphemism to hide exactly what kind of domination this is and what it’s doing to the planet. I propose that instead we call it the “Idiocene,” signifiying the “New Era of Idiots.” “Idiot” comes from the Greek word ἰδιώτης meaning both an incompetent person and a private citizen. “Idiocene” is the one precisely appropriate name for an era that is suicidally stupid and ecocidally privatizing. Would you like a simple definition of the Idiocene? You might remember the old joke about a robber who comes up to somebody on the street, pulls out a gun and says: “Your money or your life!” The victim pauses and then says “Can I have a moment to think it over?” That moment is the Idiocene.