Join us in this fast-paced session that will show you all
the best ways to ignore requests to turn off your cell phone. You will also
learn all the loudest ring tones, how to pretend you don’t hear your own phone
ringing, and how to stare blankly at your ringing phone as though you have no
idea how to answer it. Reserve your seat now!

How to Beat a
Ticket from the Citation Police

A well-known genealogy outlaw will show you all the tips
and tricks to skirt the law when the citation sheriff comes to town. Includes
all the best techniques for designing your own citation “system” that no one
else will understand.

New Ways to Judge
Others Based on their Lineage Society Memberships

Strategies you can utilize to ensure that everyone knows
how important your ancestors are as opposed to others. Learn how to order
special pins, clothing and “bling” to show that you’re top dog, making it
easy for you to look down on others.

Passive-Aggressive
Blogging for Beginners

This in-depth session shows you how to write a blog post
about someone that makes you angry without naming names, though everyone knows
who you’re talking about. Also includes ways to blow issues out of proportion
and write pieces without thinking to ensure you’ll regret what you said
tomorrow.

GEN-ealogy or
GENE-eaology? Pronunciation Fight Club

There are two camps in the pronunciation of genealogy.
The session puts both groups in a closed room. Last man standing wins
pronunciation rights.

Overhead
Transparencies: A Genealogy Speaker’s Best Asset

Learn the earliest and oldest in overhead transparency
technology including fuzzy fonts, blurry images and filling the whole page with
text. Audiences will be talking about you in no time!

The fact that these gems were rejected just tells you how many great sessions are offered at regional and national genealogy conferences these days. Get out there and have fun (but turn off your cell phone, please).

43 comments:

Oh Amy. You started my day in tears. Fortunately they were the good kind. I would find you six spots in a New York minute. Or the amount of time it takes for me to set up an Outlook rule to ditch those emails. Whatever is faster.

Hey Coffin - Cheryl and I tried to pick a fight with you and Denise last year over the reaching our goals thing. so that by Jamboree time we were have a tag team Genealogy Smackdown. It was going to be on like Donkey Kong.

If you are coming out in June I would be honored to push you around a little like in the hallways between classes or into the pool providing neither of us has a paper mache pinata.. I am a good friend like that.

Amy, ROTFLMAO. I love it. I personally would sign up for the Pronunciation Fight Club as well as How to Beat a Ticket from the Citation Police. I think we have a new conference that must be planned immediately....Donna

I needed a seriously good Laugh this morning and you just provided it!! THANK YOU!!! You also made me Very,Very grateful for our group at the Sumner County (Kansas) Historical and Genealogical Society! I work with a great group!!

New Ways to Judge Others Based on their Lineage Society MembershipsI was laughing so hard - the coffee cups, t-shirts, certificates and pins. Met a person who was wearing all, had a cup in hand and certificates on the wall. Didn't know there were that many organizations out there.