She had this to say when asked about acting in music videos where she has intimate scenes with actors she's not familiar with:

“但是在那时候，就是爱啊。”

No wonder her videos could always make me cry. Because you do see in that few minutes - her love, and her terrible loss.

10:24 PM;

24 March 2007

In the midst of a headache that has overstayed its welcome for 3 days too long, it's magnificent there appeared someone who somehow made the day just that much brighter.

I don't know if two neuroses knew they are a perfect match today, but one neurosis was certainly jolted.

12:23 AM;

21 March 2007

I dream of a day when I wake up to a foggy fall morning and the bedsheets are slightly cold against my skin. I look out the window and the ocean shimmers invitingly. The boat rocks gently as the wind picks up.

Take a walk in the woods, and be spell-bound by the ochre, blush tones of the autumn leaves.

Nap and wake up at 2, and meet my best friends at the diner on the boardwalk. And still be able to order a stack of blueberry pancakes, with lots of maple syrup to go around. Sip earl grey tea from mismatched china.

How I wish there is a time when I can sit at a porch, and read all the books that I've bought and yet to finish. To watch the movies I've wanted to catch for the longest time. To re-watch those that I love again and again till all the dialogue are imprinted in my head and I can beat the characters at saying them.

Nestle on a tan armchair beside a stereo, album insert in hand, and look at every word of the lyric to every one of the songs in my favourite albums.And sing along when I feel like it, and fall silent when the poetry of the lyrics renders me speechless with their beauty.

When night falls, a bunch of us will cycle to the amusement park overlooking the sea, and go round and round on the ferris wheel. Fireworks included. There will be no fancy rides, no state-of-the-art systems. The food will be cheap and good.

Go to bed with a smile on my face, knowing that daybreak will bring yet another day as good as this.

.................................

I cope with the present by living in the future. Or in my daydreams if you prefer.I grew up always having people say that my head's in the clouds or telling me not to build castles in the air.

But up in the clouds, it's pretty nice, I find it easier to breathe. And the clouds, they do a mean job obscuring your view of what's ugly and banal in reality.

And the castles (made of sand or otherwise), they're real pretty and they are still standing up fine. And I will build as many as I can. Just you try and stop me.

10:56 PM;

18 March 2007

Playing the tourist in your own backyard is frequently the best way to spend the day.

11:32 PM;

14 March 2007

Just as everyone's getting all hyped up for SXSW, the papers had to run a feature, a feature! on the trend of Singaporeans travelling outta the country for music festivals. Yea, a trend I sadly, neither have the money nor means, to be a part of!So it's bye SXSW, bye Coachella, bye Bonnaroo, bye Glastonbury, bye Fuji Rock. Grrrr...

BUT, at least at least, The Rapture will have a gig at Zouk, April 7th!

Whoo! Alright! Yeah... Uh Huh!

9:38 PM;

09 March 2007

When I read an interview and she said this about rehab,

"I read every Murakami book. I woke up at 6am and swam in the ocean. I didn't have to be on a plane or at sound check. I didn't have to do an interview. I could come back from the beach, sleep 'til four, go see two movies. I started biking with my friends at sunset. Started thinking about getting a dog. I started being a human being."

I just felt drawn to Chan Marshall (Cat Power).

Does it appear presumptuous sometimes the way I feel an inexplicable draw to people I don't know? That I really do believe if I ran into them someday, we would both say hi and insist on a cup of coffee, and end up chatting for hours in the dim lights of a cozy cafe, and end up being best friends?

The explanation could be that you just somehow 'get' the person, or you can identify with her, or you both like the same band, movie, or something. Or to quote from Sleepless in Seattle, "when you meet someone and you're attracted to them, it just means that your subconscious is attracted to their subconscious, subconsciously. So what we think of as chemistry is just two neuroses knowing that they are a perfect match."

I lean my head slowly to the side, reflect on the camellia on the moss
of the temple, reflect on a cup of tea, while outside the wind is rustling
the foliage, the forward rush of life is crystallised in a brilliant jewel
of a moment that knows neither plans nor future, human destiny is rescued
from the pale succession of days, glows with light at last and, surpassing
time, warms my tranquil heart.