A Texas court ruled last week that a pair of Christian homeschooling parents who stopped teaching their nine kids because they believed the Rapture was imminent (and everyone knows that the best thing about heaven is NOBODY QUIZZES YOU ABOUT THE BATTLE OF HASTINGS) are not, in fact, allowed to just do that.

The filmmakers behind a reboot of the Left Behind franchise recently faced some tough questions during a Facebook Q&A with fans who are worried that before they get a chance to see movie star Nicolas Cage in the new film—WAIT FOR IT—an actual rapture might occur.

If the Bible is correct, Judgment Day is happening this Saturday. How are you supposed to know if you'll be chosen or left behind? Luckily, the knowledgable folks at Peas and Cougars have created this handy chart:

Although on Thursday Moe and I decided that the McCain ad featuring Paris Hilton was simply dumb, it is now clear that it is all part of McCain's evil genius. While we were so busy watching Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, we were missing the subliminal message that Obama is the Antichrist! No, really, people actually…