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Dear Americans

What on earth has got into 45? He is unable to get your covert operators
to carry the can for spying on his Tower so he turns his guns on
ours?

Not that I put it past either of them – what did Edward Snowdon reveal? It elicited an apology to the German Chancellor. I am not surprised that your leaders would spy on someone described as the most powerful woman in Europe. Hell, I would too.

British Intelligence acts
like Royalty – never complain – never explain. But on this occasion they came out in strong condemnation of 45’s ridiculous
assertions. It suggests extreme exasperation with what is deemed a load of old tosh coming straight out of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue – just what we have come to
expect from this POTUS.But there is this interesting term - plausible deniability or something like that. Whatever happens I do hope 45
keeps his current Press Spokesperson. Have not had such merriment in a
long while.

Thing is though, 45 is a dab hand at getting everyone running
around chasing their tail, while he is doing something nefarious in the shed at
the far end of the backyard.

The other day Facebook brought up this memory – an apt one I thought:

Native
American Council Offers Amnesty to 240 Million Undocumented Whites

I do get it though. At the risk of sounding like
those rightwing anti-immigrants on my side of the pond who put razor wire
around and bulldoze even legitimate asylum seekers - illegals can be a bit
pesky. What's to be done? I can't throw stones; I live in a glass house. Our
'wall' is in Calais. How long it will stand after BREXIT is anybody's guess.
The Continentals are pretty vexed by the Brits.

Our Dear Auntie (the BBC to you) had an interesting programme on this
week. The Long View compared 45's proposed border wall with the
impenetrable 2500 mile Great Hedge of India constructed in the 1840s to control
trade between British (colonial)India and the Princely States. Maybe all of 45's ideas
really come from his British ancestry!

No wonder he got on well with the May Queen who instantly issued an on the spot invitation to visit
our stately Buck House. But the current occupant does not appear to be overjoyed
at the prospect.

From satirical skit: Have I got News for you

We hear that 45 is meeting with Germany's Iron Lady. We expect it to be, in one word: awkward. The body language says it all. This POTUS always looks distinctly uncomfortable in his own skin and apparently even more so with the good Chancellor. Perhaps he is scared of strong powerful women. Poor booby.

Will 45 last until Midterms? It seems pretty
strange that he managed to worm his way into the House on the Avenue when his opponent
actually beat him by 3,000,000 of the popular vote. Something appears to have
gone seriously wrong with your democratic structures. I cannot wait to read PJ O'rouke's new book:

Once again I have to acknowledge my own glass house. There is just a hint of conservative tendency towards gerrymandering or simply 'disappearing' those citizens unlikely to turn out for them and/or flouting the rules if they can get away with it .

Still, apparently there's a silver lining, or unintended consequence, to 45's reign. One among you
has given 24 reasons why 45 is indeed making America great again. Patrick Worms' list has
been doing the rounds on social media:

1. Unprecedented levels of ongoing civic engagement.

2. Millions of Americans now know who their state and federal representatives are without having to google.

18. Travel ban protesters put $24 million into ACLU coffers in just 48
hours, enabling them to hire 200 more attorneys. Lawyers are now heroes.

19. As people seek veracity in their news sources, respected news
outlets are happily reporting a substantial increase in subscriptions, a
boon to a struggling industry vital to our democracy.

20. Live streaming court cases and congressional sessions are now as popular as the Kardashians.

21. Massive cleanup of facebook friend lists.

22. People are reading classic literature again. Sales of George
Orwell's "1984" increased by 10,000% after the inauguration. (Yes, that
is true. 10,000%. 9th grade Lit teachers all over the country are now
rock stars.)

23. More than ever before, Americans are aware that education is important. Like, super important.

24. Now, more than anytime in history, everyone believes that anyone can be President. Seriously, anyone.

Ha! What do
you think about that then, although I'm not so sure about Number 6!!

Since going to bed and waking up
in another day, I heard a senior member from one of your Intelligence agencies
say that 45 'betrays an extraordinary lack of understanding of how we work'. Does 45 care? He achieved all he needed in the moment: to be
the centre of attention.

One thing that captures my
attention is the deafening silence and dignified aloofness maintained by
President Obama. He is such a Class Act.