Monday, February 29, 2016

Over
the years, I’ve had a number of parents question me about what they
should say to their child when that child asks about his or her
biological parents. Adoptive families may have been provided with
varying amounts of information, from an extensive background that
includes APGAR scores to just a birthdate. Sometimes there is a vague
family history, or the child might even have some memories of their
birth family if placed as an older child. Most families have something
in between: usually a very basic history of parental death, abandonment,
voluntary placement, or removal from parental care. This leaves a hole
that is often difficult for both child and parents, as they attempt to
fill in the blanks from the past.

It is the responsibility of
adoption professionals to try to guide the parents in this area.
Adoptive parents often expect that professionals have some hidden store
of information that was not provided with the referral, or that the
information expanded while in the file and will provide the magical
answers to their child’s questions. Sometimes parents become anxious
when they receive questions from their child about their past prior to
adoption. It is important for parents to give information appropriate to
the child’s level of development; offering all the specifics at a young
age may increase anxiety for all involved.

Just as it is
important to share the information the parent has on the child’s family,
so it is important not to fill in blanks when the answer really isn’t
known. Sometimes the adoptive parent may not have any information, and
the answer might be “I’m sorry, but I don’t know.” Another option would
be to ask the child, “What do you think?” As a parent, these are not
always easy discussions, but they are important to have.

Monday, February 22, 2016

Thirteen
years ago, I left the hospital as a proud new mom. Unlike most new
moms, though, I also left the hospital with empty arms and a broken
heart, as I had just placed my newborn baby boy into the arms of his
adoptive mom and dad.

I went home and, for weeks, just tried
desperately to navigate this “new normal.” Having a baby is always a
life-changing event, but most new parents are overwhelmed by
around-the-clock feedings, diaper changes, and sleep deprivation. In my
case, I was overwhelmed with grief, sadness, and solitude. Although my
family and friends were supportive of my decision to place my child for
adoption and sympathetic to what I was going through, most had no idea
what I was really experiencing. I felt so alone, and for many weeks was
struggling just to make it through my day-to-day activities.

Unlike
many birth mothers, I did not place my child through an adoption
agency. Instead, I placed through a private adoption attorney, who only
provided me legal services. This meant I did not have a social worker or
counselor at the agency to whom I could reach out.

Novant
Global Health Symposium, Saturday March 5th from 8am - 4pm in the
Novant Health Conference Center. The event is FREE with the donation of a
first-aid item or items.

The objective of the conference
is to inform local healthcare providers and the general public about
global health opportunities, how best to prepare, how international
service builds cultural competency, and why global health is important
to the local community. The keynote speaker from a Center for Disease
Control will focus on the issues of fighting Ebola from the front lines,
the cultural implications for the local communities and the
logistics/strategies involved with coordinating multiple
organizations/agencies to prevent the spread of the disease.

Also
attending, physicians from three countries (Ghana, Armenia, Serbia),
which have benefited from the global health involvement of Piedmont
Triad based physician and nursing staff. In addition, there will be a
"Marketplace" of local organizations, faith-based groups, and service
organizations dedicated to serving vulnerable populations domestically
and abroad.

Adoption
has shaped my entire life, personally and professionally. As the son of
an adopted person, I watched my father move from feeling a sense of
quiet shame about his adoption to a place where at last – late in his
life – he could celebrate it and recognize the good it had done for him.
As a father by adoption, I’ve walked with my children through both joy
and struggle, including the occasional struggle linked to adoption.

As
a social worker and a longtime advocate for adoption, I do my best to
serve all those impacted by adoption. I love the institution of adoption
and feel called to do this work, and I have been blessed throughout my
career to serve children who need safe, loving, permanent families.

Every
year during National Adoption Month, all those who are touched by
adoption have much to celebrate. At home with my family – and with my
“work family” at National Council For Adoption – we celebrate adoption
every day, not just during the month of November. Adoption is a
time-tested institution that has undoubtedly benefited countless
children. But as we celebrate its positives, its accomplishments, and
its great potential, we must also consider the ways in which we can make
adoption work better for all – for the young birth mother or birth
father facing an unintended pregnancy who decides adoption is the right
choice, for the foster and adoptive families hoping to provide loving
homes for children, and for the infants and children who will be adopted
and grow to adulthood with adoption as part of their history and
identity.

Novant Global Health Symposium, Saturday March 5th from 8am - 4pm in the Novant Health Conference Center. The event is FREE with the donation of a first-aid item or items.

The objective of the conference is to inform local healthcare providers and the general public about global health opportunities, how best to prepare, how international service builds cultural competency, and why global health is important to the local community. The keynote speaker from a Center for Disease Control will focus on the issues of fighting Ebola from the front lines, the cultural implications for the local communities and the logistics/strategies involved with coordinating multiple organizations/agencies to prevent the spread of the disease.

Also attending, physicians from three countries (Ghana, Armenia, Serbia), which have benefited from the global health involvement of Piedmont Triad based physician and nursing staff. In addition, there will be a "Marketplace" of local organizations, faith-based groups, and service organizations dedicated to serving vulnerable populations domestically and abroad.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Every adoptee has their own personal and unique adoption story. That
history is a part of who they are, and remains a part of them as they
move from childhood through adolescence and into adulthood.

As intercountry adoption has changed over the years, more
international adoptees have become interested in searching for
information and trying to learn more about their families, countries,
and cultures of origin. An adoption search and/or reunion for an
intercountry adoptee may look very different from one undertaken by a
person adopted in the U.S. Typically an international adoption search
will require working with officials in another country and dealing with
complex legal issues, language translation, and cultural differences. To
better understand the international search and reunion process, NCFA
asked Susan Soonkeum Cox, Vice President of Policy and External Affairs
at Holt International and a Korean adoptee, to share some of her own
personal experiences.

Do you have a game plan for building attachment when you travel to meet your future child? The Family Attachment Center of Minnesota has some great games and resources for families just beginning and those that are already home. Whether your child is at risk for attachment disorder or not, these are great games to reinforce intimacy between the parent and child relationship. Be sure to print this and take it with you when you travel!

Sunday, February 7, 2016

Introduction

Attachment
is the glue that establishes the connection between a child and a
parent. When a child is born and remains with a biological parent,
bonding and attachment begin immediately. With adoption, however, that
is not always the case. In intercountry adoption children often face
multiple broken attachments, causing them to lack the foundation on
which to build healthy relationships later in life. In cases of
adoption, early attachments are too often disrupted or broken. Positive,
consistent relationships with early childhood caregivers and, later,
adoptive parents can help reestablish a child's healthy attachment
abilities.

The Basics of Attachment

To understand how to
foster healthy attachment for children adopted internationally, it is
important to understand the heart of the subject at hand: attachment
theory. According to Bowlby, a pioneer in attachment theory, attachment
is a biological, motivational system that develops within humans during
our early years of life. This system is what stimulates children to try
and find security, support, and care from specific "attachment figures"
in their lives. In her first year, when the child becomes selective
about which person she seeks out to provide these things, "selective
attachment" occurs. This person the child has selected becomes a "secure
base," meaning that she will use this person as a "home base" of sorts
to venture out from and return to at any sight of "danger." When parents
cultivate healthy and secure attachment relationships within their
children as infants, they in turn cultivate an "internal felt sense of
safety and trust, and an emerging sense of the self." Attachment, then,
is not only important to relationships with parents and family members,
it is also essential to children's forming relationships in the world
around them.

Monday, February 1, 2016

Since our inception in 1980, National Council For Adoption (NCFA) has served as a strong and principled advocate for children outside of family care, adopted individuals, adoptive families, birth parents, and the public at-large. Motivated by the belief that every child deserves to thrive in a loving, safe, and permanent home, NCFA continues to support laws, policies, and practices to help promote permanency for the many children worldwide living without permanent families.

Our January Adoption Advocate is always dedicated to presenting NCFA’s policy priorities for the coming year and related legislation. NCFA rarely endorses specific legislation, but instead prioritizes educating key legislators and policymakers on the policies and practices that will provide essential services and the best possible support for children outside permanent family care, adopted individuals, birth parents, and adoptive families. At present, we are beginning the 2nd year of the 114th United States Congress, which began January 3, 2015 and continues until January 3, 2017. As we outline our priorities generally in this article, we will also take the opportunity to mention current pending legislation that is related to NCFA’s legislative priorities.

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About

Robin Sizemore, Executive Director of Hopscotch Adoptions Inc, was recognized in 2012 by the Winston-Salem Alumnae Chapter of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Inc as a person who has "Transform Lives and Impacted the Community". Among five other recipients, Robin Sizemore, was recognized in the area of "International Awareness" for her work and advocacy of children through international adoption and aid. Robin was also the recipient of the "Angels in Adoption" award in 2008, in recognition of her service to children since 1995.