I regret little, but in looking back I am disappointed at my not participating in a reflection project for 2011. That year was so excruciating and painful and joyful and liberating and full that it is very much a blur of change. I should have recorded some part of it - though a peek into my December Daily 2011 will certainly give an indication to why the project did not get completed!

I enjoyed participating in reverb10 which resulted in a beautiful blog, a wonderful keepsake album and a collection of incredible memories - fully recorded. For 2010, I will always remember where I was and where I was planning on going. I want to go through that same exercise again for 2012. This past year was equally worth remembering.

Not that I have an abundance of time this year, but I do have a great desire, so that will have to do! I have curated a number of prompts from many resources. Those I've selected can be found below as well as a few of my own, they have each been attributed as best I can.

29 December 2012

day twenty two | discovery

prompt: discovery

Did you discover something that surprised or delighted you? What was it? (Author: Me)

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It recently occurred to me that I have slowly returned to the woman I was in my late-20s - with a few needed improvements and far more confidence. Well, in my head, I still have much work to do to heal my heart and strengthen my body.

I am delighted to discover that the repair process takes far less time than what it took to create so much damage. My spirit has, many times, taken a beating by those who should have had more care and concern, but for whatever reason failed to treat me with the kindness and respect deserved.

I've become an expert at turning shit into sunshine. Perhaps it's the years of playing devil's advocate in conversations and classrooms. I like to take situations and look at every possible angle to see if there is another, more positive and kind, way to interpret the situation while keeping in mind the reality of it all. No rose coloured glasses here, but it is far preferable to look at the bright side. Indeed, manifest the bright side if none can easily be found.

I've discovered I can still do that.

I've returned to the woman who is my own best advocate - when I remember. Like everyone I get caught up in self-doubt and sometimes it's just exhausting to beat your head against an immovable force, but it is worth it. I am delighted I stayed open to the healing lessons of this past year, and reluctantly appreciative of having gone through the journey of the last 20 years, it has helped me to return to myself. A bit tattered and worn, but filled with experience and determination to make the best life I can for me and my children. I'm so appreciative of those who - new and veteran - who have stuck around in support, and even those who have fallen by the wayside. Lessons were learned from all.

I delight in the lessons. I delight in the journey. I delight in the possibility.