Matt Johnson: You BastardMrs. Robot has this cousin. He got married fairly young and is now going through divorce proceedings. His wife had been getting busy with her boss (a dentist) and got busted for it.Oh well.We hadn't been in on the details of all this, but Mrs. Robot's aunt wrote her an email the other day with the family news, including this line:

He's still torn up about Mendi and Dr. Matt Johnson.

*beep*Rich if your grandmother or aunt looked at your website they wouldn't know what they saw.

OldSo, I am about to reach the age of Jesus. The age when he died. Or didn't die and came back.I think it was maybe a year and a half ago when my body was finally like, "Listen, you have had a good run, but we can't do this anymore. I am taking over."Since then, I have got to experience all sorts of fun things like heart burn and random, unexplained soreness.And open wounds on my hands.. wait, no.I don't have stigmata.

If you suffer from heartburn, here are a few 'flags' to look for in your diet:AlcoholSpicy foodChocolateCaffeineCitrus FruitTomatoes

Fun, eh? Cut back on those things and you'll be all right. I mean, you'll be living a boring ass life gastronomically, but you won't have heart burn.

My deskI officially hate my f*cking desk here at work. Stupid layout. I have no room for my computer here (um, hello?).I won't get into, but this is by far the suckiest desk I have ever had.I will take a pay cut for a better desk - really. Send me an offer.Bring it.

HaircutI need one.

SneakyI am. According to my father-in-law. But in the good sneaky way, and not the 'I have a wife and child in another town and I am married to three women" way.

Birthday Loot so far2 books from Mom y Dad4 homemade cds from Mark1 'counter-terrorism' soldier action figure from the Gilmers1 photo of mark making an obscene gesture in a doctor's office

[note: I just had the hardest time spelling "soldier". WTF. Stupid brain.]