Audrie Pott: Do boys share blame for Saratoga teen’s suicide?

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At left, Larry Pott holds a photograph of his daughter Audrie Pott, with his wife Lisa Pott, in Audrie's bedroom, at the Pott's home in Saratoga, Calif., on Friday, Dec. 13, 2013. This photo is part of the TECH REDEFINED PRIVACY story. (LiPo Ching/Bay Area News Group)

A poster of Audrie Pott, is photographed at a news conference in San Jose, Calif. on Monday, April 15, 2013. Saratoga High School student, Audrie Pott, 15, committed suicide last September following an alleged sexual assault by three 16-year-old classmates. Photos of the assault were shared publicly prompting her to take her own life eight days later. (Gary Reyes/ Staff)

SARATOGA — One by one, the teenagers from Saratoga High School will take the witness stand, compelled by court order to tell their stories of the night Audrie Pott was sexually assaulted and the agonizing week of photos and rumors that followed until she killed herself.

The civil trial expected to start next month was brought by Audrie’s parents and is supposed to determine who is to blame for the 15-year-old’s death. But perhaps more illuminating than the accusations of depraved boys and irresponsible parents will be the first-person testimonials about the complicated world of teenagers navigating a culture of drinking and drugs, sex and cellphones, body image and bullying, and bad behavior.

In a deposition before the trial, one of the male teens, who is now a senior at Saratoga High, already admitted that well before they assaulted Audrie at a drunken house party in Saratoga, he and one of the other boys had been sharing photos of naked classmates — since middle school.

It’s a world largely kept secret from parents — some with backgrounds of divorce and drama — who all want to believe they’re good parents raising good kids.

“I think there will be lessons,” said Audrie’s father, Larry Pott, of the pending trial. “I hope so.”

Since Audrie’s death, in September 2012, her story became a cautionary tale for the nation of what can happen when humiliation and hopelessness collide. It’s a theme that has only repeated itself since her death, with headlines across the country from high schools to college campuses of girls drinking too much and boys taking advantage.

It also raises troubling issues for those on the periphery, kids who may not engage in the risky behavior themselves but who watch it happen.

In Audrie’s case, “most of her friends abandoned her, shamed her and blamed her,” Audrie’s stepmother, Lisa Pott, told 2,500 students at Tracy High School during a presentation in December. “Give some thought to what you would do if you were in the same situation. What if you were at that party?”

It’s the kind of question that is being discussed at high schools across the Bay Area and beyond. At Saratoga High, where two of Audrie’s assailants are still enrolled, a ceramics teacher started a Girls With Courage group. At Miramonte High School in the East Bay, a sophomore at the school paper called for the purging of a secret online “drop box” where boys swapped photos of naked classmates who had taken sexy selfies.

“A lot of times guys will ask girls for pictures repeatedly. They’re like, ‘No, I don’t want to do that,’ but they’re pressured into it. The guys will share it on this site, or they would show it to their friends,” said Sofia Ruiz, who wrote about the drop box photos earlier this year. “It’s upsetting that that’s the way our society works. Girls aren’t points to be racked up, and you can’t treat other human beings like that, but that’s what’s happening.”

At Tracy High School where the Potts spoke, students took up Audrie’s cause to teach students about the consequences of sexting and cyberbullying and sitting on the sidelines.

“We do presentations at middle schools,” said Rina Singh, a senior who co-founded the Bulldog Project with Makaela Bournazian and other students the year after Audrie’s death. “We want them to be comfortable talking about these issues, to understand that all of this really has to come to an end.”

Audrie’s parents, including her mother, Sheila Pott, have tried to — as Larry Pott says — “fight the evil with the good,” by starting a foundation in Audrie’s name and championing legislation to impose stiffer penalties on similar juvenile crimes. They insist their wrongful-death lawsuit — which kicks off with a hearing Wednesday and jury selection next week — is not about the money. It’s about holding the teens, who they believe got off lightly, more accountable and bringing more awareness to the darker side of the culture of teens and the parents who protect them.

But as much as the trial will shine a light on the troubled lives of teenagers, it will surely delve into Audrie’s family life — the divorced parents, the new family with the stepmother and three young siblings, and the man claiming to be her biological father, who tried to re-enter her life.

In court documents, defense lawyers for the ﻿teens have already suggested Audrie’s parents, not the male teens, are to blame. Audrie’s life was so fraught with turmoil, the defense contends, that it “undoubtedly caused significant emotional trauma to Audrie in the years prior to her suicide.”

The three teens — who are all 18 now — will be called to the witness stand during the trial and explain what they already admitted to in juvenile court about the night they gathered at a classmate’s house in Saratoga when the parents were out of town and the liquor cabinet was wide open: that they sexually assaulted Audrie by digital penetration and took pictures of her half-naked body on the bed. They had scrawled lewd messages on her body in black Sharpie. Audrie, who had passed out drunk, didn’t remember a thing but quickly found out that rumors and photos were circulating and was desperate to make it all stop.

“I’m in hell. Everybody knows about that night,” Audrie wrote in a string Facebook messages. “My life is over. The people I thought I could trust f-ed me over and then tried to lie to cover it up. I have a reputation for a night I don’t even remember and the whole school knows.”

This newspaper is not naming the teens because they were juveniles — sophomores, 15 and 16 — when they committed the crimes. They are referred to in court documents with pseudonyms. Their lawyers have declined to comment on the case. Two of the teens were sentenced to 30 days in jail, which they served on weekends to allow them to remain in school at Saratoga High. The third, who transferred to Christopher High in Gilroy and played on the football team there, served 45 consecutive days.

Despite the Potts’ petition drive to have the teens expelled from school, all three are preparing to graduate. Earlier this month, the Potts agreed to an out-of-court settlement with one of the Saratoga High teens. The Potts’ lawyer, Bob Allard, said that teen was the only one who “told the truth” about what happened to Audrie.

The Potts are bracing for an emotionally wrenching two-week trial, where they know they, too, will be targets. But as Sheila Pott said six months after her daughter’s death, “I’ve already been to the worst place in my life. There’s not much that can hurt me now.”

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