about 4 months ago i was walking home and 4 men in a van pulled up beside me and i was taken into the back of their van and raped several times.. i hate talking about what happened and i havent told anyone about, i was hoping that any other victims would help me to get through this, i never had sex before and i feel really upset wondering whether this counts as loosing my virginity :'( can anyone help pleaaseee :/ Thanks

The following user gives a hug of support to kathleen96:Phoenix (04-22-2012)

I had to re-read your post several times,as it was difficult to register the extremely traumatic ordeal that you've been through.

Please do not blame yourself in any way for what happened(if this is the case).

It saddens me to say but if there was penetration,then your suspicions were right.

Please try looking into therapy,or at the very least consider it.
We will be here to offer you both advice and support but I feel that you'll also benefit from the help of a consummate professional,as you may encounter a myriad of conflicting feelings.

Please keep posting as often as you need and know that you will be in a safe,non-judgemental environment........united we stand.

You will be in my prayers.

Most respectfully stated
Phoenix

__________________
When in doubt, post it out.

The Following User Says Thank You to Phoenix For This Useful Post:kathleen96 (04-19-2012)

What you went through is horrible, and I am beyond sorry for what those disgusting men did to you. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I also lost my virginity to a rape, it never gets any easier to deal with. But when I started talking to some trusted adults about what happened they gave me some great advice, and I'd like to share it with you. They told me to surround myself with people who can make you laugh, a laugh is worth more than you can ever imagine. Told me when I start to think about what happened, to look at photos or videos of good memories, and to go out and create some new memories. They also told me that virginity is a state of mind, you can earn it back.
I hope I have helped in some way, just know that there are people who care about you, and would love to help you in your time of need.

The following 2 users give hugs of support to: jade680kathleen96 (04-22-2012), Phoenix (04-20-2012)

The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to jade680 For This Useful Post:kathleen96 (04-22-2012), Phoenix (04-20-2012)

I'm sorry for what you've gone through. I know it's difficult going through something like that but the good news is, if you stick around here, you can be sure you aren't alone. I've gone through several experiences and they are always hard to talk about. Once I finally do talk about them, I feel a little better.

If you're wondering if they took your virginity in a physical way, yes. But if you're wondering if it counts in an emotional way, only if you want it to. I was 14 when my brother's friend who was 17 had sex with me, unwillingly. I struggled with the whole "am I still a virgin?" thing because I didn't know what to think. My mom said if I want to consider myself a virgin until the right guy comes along when I'm older then that's perfectly fine. In reality, no I wasn't a virgin anymore. But when my met my NOW husband then, and we were intimate for the first time when I got older, I always felt HE was the one who took my virginity away. It's all about how you view it.

Again, I'm sorry for what you've gone through but you are definitely not alone.

The Following User Says Thank You to Chrissy26 For This Useful Post:kathleen96 (07-14-2012)

i havent beem doin to good recently if im honest, ive been goin through weird phases that i canot explain, there was a time when things didnt seem so bad, whenever i was feelin down id just think of things that made me happy, and it seemed to help, bt nw everythin i see reminds me of what hapend, sometimes i feel to scared to go outside. And i dnt like being around men anymore. I dont no whether things are going to change or get worse :'(