the whole nine yards...

hello; i'm new to the forums.
i'm 19 from NY, still struggling with an eating disorder (trying to lose the weight the RIGHT way now) and a substance abuse problem on top of depression. I was on lexapro for about a year but i just stopped taking it (drs orders). I find that since i've been in treatment for my substance abuse (mostly alcohol and weed), i've gained A LOT more weight than i gained after going to ED treatment. I've been clean for a year now and gained around 30 pounds...and it sucks! haha, you'd think that not getting the munchies all the time would help you lose weight. anyway, i guess i'm just looking for anyone experiencing something similar. i don't really have a plan yet...i think it's because my first instinct is to start a calorie notebook, but thats how my ED began and i'm afraid of ending up like that again. I haven't had any problems with my depression (though the lexapro DID seem to make me gain more weight than i might have), but thats an issue too. I don't want to relapse into that world of starving, using, and suffering again. Anyone relate or any advice?

Do you go to counseling and do you have a higher power. Those are the two things u need. Support, support and more support as you try to get your life back together. The pain fades when u have let go of the past and let joy in. Good luck!

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