“It’s important to normalize their anxiety about meeting someone new, and to trust that if it’s the right person that anxiety will begin to dissipate,” she writes. “In truth, the only way to get an accurate take on the other person, to truly assess if there is a real connection, and to be in touch with one’s own instincts about how it feels to be in their company is to pursue this endeavor in a sober state.”

Knowing limits

Claire AH, a matchmaker based in Toronto, said that while there is nothing wrong with drinking on the fist date, it’s about setting up boundaries to make yourself and others around you feel comfortable.

Claire said that if you’re the type of person who feels more comfortable drinking before going on a date, you may want to experiment dating sober.

“It’s a nice idea to try not and see what it’s like, especially if you find you always have to be drinking on dates,” she told Global News.

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She added that for people who tend to make bad decisions when they drink or do things they wouldn’t do sober, it may not be the best idea to excessively drink on dates. “This can also include gravitating towards topics or other behaviour they don’t talk about.”

For some, alcohol also makes people confessional.

“They bring up personal things that create a false sense of intimacy very early,” she continues. “It like a natural flow and makes us think we have more in common or there’s more significance to the relationship than there actually is.”

Claire added that as a dating culture, we need to move away from this idea that not drinking on the first date is not the norm. People don’t drink for all kinds of reasons, and if you’re on a date, you shouldn’t have to explain yourself.

“That should be considered poor form on a date,” she said. “If someone asks, ‘what’s wrong with you?’ because you don’t act like how their bubble act, it’s not a way to make someone feel comfortable.”