Monday, October 11, 2004

Gandhi sent an email this morning from his office it explained what happened Thursday. The men were his brothers and cousins and the older woman his sister-in-law. It seems his wife had become suspicious that he was having an affair and went to her sister-in-law for advice. The matter was brought to G's eldest brother who installed a spy program on G's computer. What G thought was a secret email account was uncovered and his brother monitored it. When we arranged Thursday's date the decision was made to confront us.

Frequently I'm a worrier about what might go wrong, in whoring, somewhere on the list below a psycho client, is being confronted by the spouse. What happened Thursday was pretty close to what I feared. My spouse contingency plan is to run like hell from the situation so when she showed I already knew what I was going to do.

Chloe brings up an interesting point about personal security as an escort vs. a lover. The confrontation may have unfolded similarly but if I were emotionally involved with G I would have 'stood by my man' and how that would have played out would have been much different.

Ethics and the Whore

Over the weekend I thought of G and the relationship between a whore and her client. If the whore's goal is to move as much money from his bank account to mine what are the ethical boundaries of the relationship? Is calling an ambulance if he has a heart attack in bed the minimum or maximum in ethical behavior?

When I first started to see G his youth and immaturity bothered me. I knew that despite what he said his feelings of shame over his sexual desires drove him to see me not her refusal to participate. I rationalized the situation and as I began to like G and enjoy having sex with him I did begin to manipulate him to keep him coming back. At the end of one of our meetings during the summer as we cuddled he tearfully confessed how ashamed he felt and how guilty he felt about seeing me. If I hadn't been so selfish, I would have walked away. But I simply used the information to exert more control over him.

I regret my actions in this and have learned a couple of lessons. I need to remember for me it's about the money and his needs are what to focus on or as Olympia has told me "its business". I also need to set my threshold higher for the maturity of potential clients. Beyond G this hasn't been a problem but I don't want anything like that happening again.

This week is very unstructured, no whoring until the weekend when I visit Gavin and no meetings with marketing clients. I do have several milestones for projects that need to be met but those are well under control. I got out of the apartment today and bicycled. We're in a rainy period but today it was just cloudy and cool. I'm going to see Wendy again Wednesday evening. We had a nice time Friday but didn't land in bed that surprised me. I wonder what this week will bring. By Friday I should know if we made the cut to provide a presentation on the hotel marketing contract. I have my fingers crossed.

3 Comments:

He will no longer be a client. His message also contained an appology, which was nice. I suspect for now G will not be seeing prostitutes, but I think his wife is in for a long life of wondering where he goes when he leaves the house.

Hmmm... I need to write up a memory of Annie that addresses a similar issue.

I think "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" covers the heart attack thing. If you had a medical issue, would you want your client to call the ambulance? Of course.

A business transaction does not have to be inhumane. If we weren't human... Well, I wouldn't be a client, and you wouldn't be a whore, right? And I wouldn't be guilty about the money -- it was his to spend, on you. If you manipulated him... Well, there's a lot of that going around. And, at some level, he wanted to be manipulated. We all of us choose.