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I have an awesome boyfriend in my home country and went for study abroad for the last three years. Everyone says i'm the luckiest girl since my boyfriend is not only handsome, he runs his own business, and very successfull. He's also very romantic and so devoted to me. I am dearly in love with him and adore him so much..i thought i will never attract to another guy in my life..why should I?

But now i feel so guilty and confuse because for the last few months i realised that i have a crush on this 'another' guy. He is my class mate at the uni and we sometimes working on our project together. We never did anything more than a lunch, and teasing eachother like good friends are, sharing laughter and general stories of our life. I know he has a gilfriend abroad, but i never mentioned anything about my status. I'm playing single intentionally, and it's convincing since my boyfriend is rarely around....

Everyday, I feel terrible inside about this, but i couldn't help it..

I don't know why i'm attractedd to this guy, yes he is handsome and polite and obviously smart. But in overall if i compared with my boyfriend, he is 6 out of 10.

Actually we kinda of flirting but still hold back our feeling because mostly i avoid beeing alone with him or going out whenever it's possible. i know that's not proper.

But sit next to him, spend times with him, and just a little touch in in my shoulder will lighth up my day. I feel like i'm fourteen and can't get him out of my mind even if i'm with my boyfriend (we visited each other twice a year).

I feel horrible, and terrified of my own feeling..If only we are not in our position right now, things could turn out differently, i often thought..

Now we almost finished our study and i have to go back to Venice as he will go back to The US.

So many things left unspoken, and for some reasons my heart is torn apart, i know it will be hard for me to see him again..especially now that i know his girlfriend is coming in the city and definitely holding him tight somewhere. Why can't I get rid of his shadow? why i like this guy so much? I don't have the answer...

My tears is falling when my love is calling and whispering 'I love you madly sweetheart, missing you all the time, and can't wait to hold you close in my heart..do you miss me?

Yes my love, i miss you so much, and i need your great love rigt now..please forgive me.

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