Why Women Hold Back On Their Marketing Mindset

The people who feel like their are just treading water month after month….they start to get tired, their legs begin to cramp and give out, and that’s when they call for me.

I grab my tool kit of business and life saving devices and run to their rescue {without the slow motion closeup shot of my chest}.

The fastest way for me to save someone is when they are completely, brutally, off the charts, honest with me about their business, life, and concerns.

So you can imagine how happy it made me to receive this question today:

“Why do I HATE marketing and sales? I mean I absolutely LOATHE it? Why does it make me feel yucky and slimy? I study marketing and copywriting techniques and it just makes me feel like I’m learning how to be a con artist.

I want to feel good about marketing. I want to feel at peace about it. I want to feel authentic I want to bring in loads of new clients without feeling like I’m tricking them into spending money.

How do I stand out in a sea of people but do it in a way that doesn’t make me feel like this???”

Yyyyeeessssss, girl! 🙌 🙌 🙌

Love it. And the simplest answer is…..you’re screwed up.

Kidding….kind of.

Your mindset and priorities could be out of whack. Let’s take a look at some possibilities.

1. HOW CONFIDENT ARE YOU?

First of all, do you believe in your product, service, or your ability to be a top-notch business woman?

If you don’t stand 1000% behind whatever you are selling, then you will ALWAYS feel like a scammer.

This is particularly difficult for women selling their services (coaches, artists, photographers, advisors, etc.) because they have to adapt, adjust, and provide a slightly different result with each unique customer or client.

If you don’t have complete confidence in yourself and your ability to provide the service you may end up feeling like a scammer.

“Don’t be intimidated by what you don’t know. That can be your greatest strength and ensure that you do things differently from everyone else.”

-Sara Blakely, Founder of Spanx

Solution: When offering a new service, I like to keep the ball in my court. I either have the potential clients fill out an application or I have a 15 minute meeting with them to determine if I am 100% confident I can help them. As I become more and more confident with a service, I slowly branch out my customer base.

You don’t have to open up your services to the entire world. Be selective. Take on the clients you KNOW you can help and as your confidence grows you can then widen your scope of clientele.

2. SERVICE IS KEY

It’s difficult when you are a small business owner and your ability to sell is how you survive. If our profits/income begins to drop we go into sales mode.

How can I sell more?

How can I find more people to sell to?

How can I outsell my competitors?

How can I convince people to spend money with me?

In that instant, our mindset has switched from, “What can I GET?” rather than, “What can I GIVE?” When our business and marketing is based around, “What can I get?” it will start to take on that con artist feel. You’ll feel it, your customers will feel it, the people looking at your marketing/advertising will feel it.

“Life-fulfilling work is never about the money — when you feel true passion for something, you instinctively find ways to nurture it.”

-Eileen Fisher

Solution: One of my pet peeves is when I see articles with titles along the lines of, “Millennials Have Killed Brand XYZ.” In reality, the title should be, “Brand XYZ Sucked at Adapting to Millennials.”

If your sales aren’t where you want them to be, it’s probably you haven’t adapted to your niche. The questions you need to start asking are:

What do they need?

What are they looking for?

How can I provide for them?

How can I make their life better?

These questions come from a place of service and adaptation rather than “what can I get?”

3. Women Want to Raise Their Hands

“From a very early age, boys are encouraged to take charge and offer their opinions. Teacher interact more with boys, call on them more frequently, and ask them more questions. Boys are also more likely to call out answers, and when they do, teachers usually listen to them.When girls call out, teachers often scold them for breaking the rules and remind them to raise their hands if they want to speak.”

Sheryl Sandberg, “Lean In”

But the people of the world are bombarded continuously with advertisements, social media, banners, and billboards, radio advertisements, and tv programs with sales information. There is so much noise.

In marketing, there is no opportunity to raise your hand. There is no waiting your turn. You have to be brave, believe in your product/service, speak loud, use the best marketing tools and techniques at your disposal, and for Gods’ sake….interrupt.

Solution: Make sure you have a healthy mindset around the difference between being BOLD and being rude. Being bold about your service and sharing it with others does not mean you are being disrespectful.

4. Women Don’t Want to Toot

Their horn, that is.

“In October 2011, Jocelyn Goldfein, one of the engineering directors at Facebook, held a meeting with our female engineers where she encouraged them to share the progress they had made on the products they were building. Silence. No one wanted to toot her own horn. Who would want to speak up when self-promoting women are disliked?”

Sheryl Sandberg, “Lean In”

Twenty years after graduating high school a man will still brag about “that one touchdown” he got at “that one game.”

Women?…not so much.

We are not horn tooters by nature. In our every day lives we tend to be more self-deprecating and downplay our accomplishments.

So to sit and write sales copy about how we are FABULOUS with a capital “F” is counterintuitive to our girl nature.

Solution: Take a moment to read through your testimonials you’ve collected. Remind yourself WHY you are a kick-ass business women. Don’t forget, you are your biggest advocate when it comes to marketing. I have repeated said this over and over to clients, “If you cannot find the self-confidence to promote your business, good marketing will only take you so far.”

5. YOU ARE NOT EVERYONE’S CUP OF TEA

Not everyone will like you. Spoiler alert: some people will even hate you.

If you are not feeling authentic in your marketing, it might be because you are trying to please too many people.

If it’s stressing you out and making you feel like someone you’re not, then you are not on the right track.

A good marketing plan and copywriting should feel like you are talking to your best friend.

QUICK UPDATE

If you need so help getting the overwhelm under control, getting a clear game plan on how to move forward, building a personalized strategy that fits your business and your life…..don’t miss this opportunity!