The toy artistes of the 80s did not mess around and gave the children (and future ravers) a toy for everything. They’d drop acid, scan their office for ideas, spot a lockbox transforming into a pastel pink snail going to an old-timey Easter party and say, “That’s our next hit!” Finders Keypers (also just called “Keypers“) were the 80s version of piggy banks. They were a line of plastic toys that had hot new wave hairstyles and a secret compartment for kids to hide all of their most prized valuables and heirlooms (Sweet Secrets, Tinkerbell nail polish, necklace charms, the baby from The Heart Family, etc…). ADT must have been a consultant on Finders Keypers, because you could lock up your valuables with a key. You know that all of Lindsay Lohan’s little friends had one and would look up their shit before she came over for a playdate.

The adult Keypers had a big compartment with a key, and their baby had a slit in their body for kids to put coins in. Each Keyper came with a “Finder,” which was a tiny flashlight to help kids find their lost stuff. Here’s the Keypers in action, and HAHA at that little thief’s robbery plot getting foiled!

Below are just a few pictures of some Keypers, but the most glamorous of them was today’s HSOTD Princess. She was a swan who had a stream of luscious pink polyester hair flowing out of her head and an opulent plastic crown. Princess was more secure than Fort Knox, because every time a shameless thief tried to break into her, they would find themselves hypnotized by her glamour, which would cause them to fumble while trying to pick her lock and they’d just give up.

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