I think I may start mining Mystery Men for quotes. This could get long.

Sphinx: We are number one. All others are number two or lower.

Mr. Furious: I don't need a compass to know which way the wind shines.

The Sphinx: To learn my teachings, I must first teach you how to learn.

The Sphinx: You must lash out with every limb, like the octopus who plays the drums.

The Sphinx: He who questions training only trains himself at asking questions.

[Mr. Furious tries to balance a hammer on his head] Mr. Furious: Why am I doing this, again? The Sphinx: When you can balance a tack hammer on your head, you will head off your foes with a balanced attack. Mr. Furious: And why am I wearing the watermelon on my feet? The Sphinx: [looks at the watermelon on Mr. Furious' feet] I don't remember telling you to do that.

The Shoveller: We struck down evil with the mighty sword of teamwork and the hammer of not bickering.

The Shoveller: Come on, somebody do something, we need him. The Bowler: Okay. Okay, you're a very furious man, you understand that? Mr. Furious: No. The Bowler: No? Well you've got a lot to be furious about, and I'll tell you why: You're not well-liked. You're uh, you're abrasive and off- putting. You try and say pithy things, but your wit is a hinderance and therefore nothing is provocative. Just mixed metaphors. Now, doesn't that make you angry? Does it infuriate you? Mr. Furious: No. The Bowler: Well, it should. Aren't you angry? Come on, man! The Shoveller: Your penmanship is atrocious! The Sphinx: You dress in the manner of a male prostitute!

Lucille: If just one person vomits in my pool, I'm divorcing you. The Shoveller: That's fair

The Shoveller: If we had a billionaire like Lance Hunt as our benefactor... Mr. Furious: That's because Lance Hunt *IS* Captain Amazing The Shoveller: Don't start that *again*. Lance Hunt wears glasses. Captain Amazing *doesn't* wear glasses. Mr. Furious: He takes them off when he transforms. The Shoveller: That doesn't make any sense, he wouldn't be able to see

Waffler: I... am the Waffler. With my griddle of justice, I BASH the enemy in the head, or I burn them like so! I also have some truth syrup, which is low in fat. (The fact that this guy was played by Dane Cook makes it even funnier.)

The Shoveller: All right, I'll take point, you two flank. Let's triangulate. The Spleen: Equilateral or isosceles?

The Shoveller: We've got a blind date with destiny... and it looks like she's ordered the lobster.

I love that movie.

If only Wash were a magical zombie like Jesus. I miss him. Now who will pilot my spaceship?"Life IS pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."Alex Trebek: Oh good. Mr. Connery wants to say something.Sean Connery: I've thought of some more foreign ladies I snogged.

Airplane wrote:Doctor Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital. Stewardess: A hospital? What is it? Doctor Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

"I don't mean to sound bitter, cynical or cruel; but I am, so that's how it comes out." ~ Bill Hicks."To argue with a person who has renounced reason is like administering medicine to the dead." ~ Thomas Paine."One should not believe everything one reads on the internet." ~ Abraham Lincoln."I linked the number of MPs to the number of votes. If you'd done a real Science degree you'd understand sticking to the point." ~ daftbeaker.