Spoof news stories from Saturday 28 September 2013

OMG!
A growing segment of the population has resorted to the regular use of acronyms as technology use continues to rise. As society has moved from cell phone, text chatting, and the like, on to advanced forms of communication such as social ne...

Some couples buy matching outfits. Royal couples get matching heraldry.
A new Conjugal Coat of Arms for the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge blends William's royal shield comprised of English and Scottish Lions and a harp to symbolize Ireland with Ka...

A man has spent nearly an entire year seeking financial reparations for undue stress, financial woe, and emotional damages related to life on earth continuing to exist.
"I don't know exactly who or what group of person's specifically I have to go after, but these Mayan's owe me an explanation!" states Noah Oanaship.
Apparently Mr. Oanaship had spent the year prior to the alleged prophecy d...

Children being treated at a Washington, D.C. hospital got a welcome surprise Tuesday when Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) gave them a bedtime reading of "Green Eggs and Ham," the classic Dr. Seuss story about health care reform.
"I'm an Ass," he began, standing before the roomful of sick children in their hospital beds.
"Ass I am.
"That Ass I am!
That Ass I am!
I will not treat you Ass I am.

In a stunning political development that has become the talk of Washington, Senator Ted Cruz announced yesterday that he has had a dramatic awakening and a complete, sudden transformation. He is no longer a Conservative. He is no longer a Republican.

Popular online dating site, "Plenty of Fish" is quaking in its boots as it learns of plans of a competing company to roll out a site called "Plenty of Baggage"(POB).
The new format is said to be more conducive to members, old and new, that tend...

VENICE BEACH, California - Miley Cyrus talked to Ryan Seacrest and she told him that she has had enough of hate-filled people criticizing her for her fleshy bodily displays.
She remarked that she plans on purchasing a nudist resort located just ou...

NEW ORLEANS - The former Queen of Cooking who has now become the nation's number one persona non grata was in the Big Easy hoping to land a job as a greeter at one of the town's Cajun food restaurants.
As she was leaving the restaurant after her i...

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Stacy Keibler who possesses the longest legs in all of LaLaLand recently told a reporter for Hollywood Innuendo that she is totally over George Clooney.
Keibler revealed to Tahiti Zeppelin that she had a great time when she was w...

HOLLYWOOD - Kanye West is reportedly angrier that Kirstie Alley with an empty family-sized bag of Doritos.
The hip hop rapper is furious and pretty near foaming at the mouth over the way he says Jimmy "The Chump" Kimmel disrespected him on his la...

SAN FRANCISCO - Monica Lewinsky has told one of her co-workers that back during her blue dress days she had a crush on George Clooney.
She said that she really liked him but of course she was kind of involved with the president of the United State...

LOS ANGELES - It's no secret that since being fired from X-Factor last year, Britney Spears has become a bit of a recluse in the world of glitz and glamour.
She has gone from being on the spotlight before 20 million viewers of Simon Cowell's talen...

HOLLYWOOD - Jessica Simpson has said that after being pregnant for what seemed forever, she has finally gotten her fantastically, sultry body back and she is ready to show it off.
Reports out of Tinsel Town state that Simpson has already been appr...

NEW ORLEANS - Taylor Swift performed before a sold-out crowd at one of her favorite venues, The Voodoo Arena in New Orleans.
The country music songstress says that she loves the Voodoo because it has one of the finest sound systems in the entire c...