Monthly Archives: June 2008

When we work with animals infected E. coli we have to wear full body protection which includes a disposable space suit.

I liked this space suit so much that I took home a clean one to wear around the house, for when I’m chopping up contaminated spinach or eating Jack in the Box hamburgers.

The box of space suits says “One size fits all”. For some reason they believe that every scientist has the dimensions of a sumo wrestler.

But maybe there was a reason to make the space suits huge- have you noticed that every scientist ever depicted in a Far Side cartoon was over 300 pounds? Go back and check, you’ll see it’s true.

“And there were in the same country sky-shepherds abiding in the cumulus, keeping watch over their flock by night. And lo, the angel of the taxidermed winged mammals came upon them, and the glory of the Girl shone around about them; and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, “Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto to you this day is born a fleet of majestic flying formerly extinct winged pleistocene mammoths, which are the annoited behemoths” Girl Priest 2:10-12

Goodness, please don’t show this to my priest. It would be a shame for me to be excommunicated so soon before the wedding.

Sometimes you see these things around car dealerships or other places where they want to make you excited. They look like this:

Their long bodies are kind of a hollow tube maybe made of the parachute material and a tunnel of wind keeps them erect and lets them wave their arms around. When the wind dies down, they sometimes crumple over, but during a big gust, they seemingly leap back into the air and wave their arms around again in elation.

I love them!

But what I they called? I need to know because I want to buy or rent them for our wedding. I want about 300 of them, all over the park, I want a few dozen at the altar and I want some to be waving their arms around in joy in the church pews. I also want a miniature one as the centerpiece for every table.

Though I know 300 of them might be a little over the top. I should be more realistic- we could probably use about 55 of them. But where to get them?