Hi guys. I'm sorry if this post is all over the place but I feel the to post about this situation I'm going through. This probably a bit of a bizarre story too.

Anyway, I'm 16 (turning 17 in summer) and I think I'm going through an existential crisis. I often feel out of place too as I'm not successful in school other than in music and music technology and I often question if I really have any friends as I feel they could leave me at any time. I prefer working alone however as I feel I have no one holding me back from what I'm trying to do and I think I'm better suited to being a "lone wolf" of sorts rather than being incredibly sociable.

Recently I've been sitting my final exams this year as I'm going to college soon and I had a clear idea of what career path I wanted to take, that being a sound engineer. I've been studying sound engineering for about 2 years and I am taking a college course for sound engineering. I'm afraid that if I continue to pursue a job in sound engineering I might get bored and feel like I wasted my time in school and college.

For a while now I feel like I don't want to do that as a job anymore. Recently I've began thinking of becoming a wrestler instead (I know, weird career change). The reason for the change to wrestling is because I have a weird crush on a famous female wrestler (even weirder now) although I'm really interested in the sport and being a wrestler has always been a small dream of mine since I was a child.

After thinking about the idea of becoming a wrestler I'm now always thinking about it and all the hard I would have to do get close to achieving that dream and all the things I would need to leave behind to pursue that dream. I would also most likely have to keep my job as a wrestler as a secret to my parents as they'd probably look down on the idea due to all the time I would have wasted learning how to be a sound engineer which wouldn't be ideal. I would also need to spend a few years getting in shape and getting enough training to get close to being a wrestler. I feel really passionate about becoming a wrestler now but like I said I would probably need to keep the idea hidden from everyone I know.

Along with those things I often feel depressed due to my non sociable nature and I am often bored with nothing to do, thanks to living in a small town with not a lot of places to go hangout.

Due to these things I don't feel like I've yet to find my place in the world and I've been questioning my existence and what I was meant for. If any has any advice on this issue it's be greatly appreciated and I'll reply to all comments.

Location: I live in Willy Wonka's factory. Perhaps I'll move into Neverland sometime.

Gender:

Re: I think I'm having an existential crisis

I have to admit, it seems that your passion for wrestling came up a little abrupt, but if you really feel that it's the right thing for you, then go for it. Keep in mind, though, that like you said before, it's going to take a lot of dedication to succeed as a wrestler. Make sure that wrestling is something you really want to invest yourself in and enjoy.

This is a big decision, but it might be one worth taking. Considering that you felt depressed with your current lifestyle, this might just be the thing you need to turn it all around. Besides, it's more likely that you'll regret the things you never did more than the things you did do later on. Take a chance, and see where it takes you. Life has endless opportunities, and there's nothing wrong with making the best out of it! Just make sure to enjoy every step of the way- there's no need to rush. I wish you good luck on your journey! (and, I hope this helps a little, too.)