April was a crazy, busy month for me. There were some tough moments in it, but May has brought some wonderful things. The biggest being the end of my job at the thrift store so I can spend more time writing! For the first time in over a year, I'm spending more time with my writing work than anything else.

Honestly, this week has been off to a slow start. The last couple of days I've felt anything but motivated. Yet, I'm pleased with the progress I've already made the last couple of weeks. I've finished a novella for a secret project (details coming in July) and I've made some progress in Kate's Christmas. The first draft is now full of notes and I'm about to dive headlong into editing.

This past weekend, I was very blessed with some time with my friend Kelsey (the beautiful girl with the red hair). She is a dear friend as well as a fellow author. She is also is the reason I've ventured into the world of classics. We read one a month together. We had a lot of fun going back over the books we've read together. We might be working on a project to bring those conversations to you, so stay tuned.

I've been enjoying getting back to doing something that I enjoy and some things that I don't love but feel good in the long run. Running is one of those things. I was very blessed with some perfect weather this last week as I started back.

Speaking of other things I'm really enjoying getting back to is reading!

I celebrated my return to having reading time by one of my all-time favorite books, The Heavens Before. This book is so compelling and...well I can't say enough good about it. You can read my review about it HERE.

Jane Austen. There's nothing quite like her. She continues to inspire us all these years later. This Valentines Day, myself and a few authors came together to bring a special sale and giveaway.

Twelve books are on sale for $2.99 or less. Books like Tracking Ruby and Water Princess and Fire Prince, feature characters who adore and quote Jane Austen's stories. Most of the books take the beloved classics and retell them in a new setting. Each book is perfect for those who want a little touch of Jane Austen and romance for this Valentines Day.

My first book is about to turn eight years old. It's hard to believe. It has a lot of flaws. I learned a lot since publishing it and hope to have it edited professionally, fix a couple of issues and revamp the cover sometime soon. However, it still has a very special place in my heart. Today, I've been thinking a lot about Maria at the end of that book. I've been thinking about her thoughts on destiny from all the books. Why? That's a really good question.

I've been praying a lot lately for wisdom. It seemed like there were a lot of little decisions that I needed to make. I've felt I couldn't balance all the demands on my time. I was contemplating quitting one of my outside jobs so I would have more time to write. I was praying and this morning, God answered in a way I didn't expect.

Our fridge broke.

I know, earth-shattering, right? Well, this is on top of a lot of other expenses that our family is facing. I found out that one of my jobs will allow me to work some extra hours and suddenly, everything became very clear: For this season, I need to take the extra hours and set aside my writing. No, I'm not giving it up. I'll still work on it some. However, for now, it's going to take a back seat.

This wasn't the answer I wanted. However, this is my answers and that peace that surpasses all understanding has filled my heart. I don't understand where this turn in destiny is taking me, but I know that God does. He knows the destiny He has for me.

With that said, I probably won't be blogging much or sending out weekly author newsletters, for this time and season.

While I won't be online as much. I'll be around. I'm so grateful for every hour God has provided for me to write and I know He will continue to provide a time where I can. I know that this is only the beginning of my continuing destiny.

This is something I wrote a while back and I'm sharing it in honor of all my single friends who single during this Valentine's season.

Strong is a title I’ve been given a lot over the years. In fact, some people assumed I didn’t care about some of the things that happened to me because I presented what, to them, seemed like a strong exterior. Right now, I’m not feeling very strong.

I had a rough week. Maybe you did too. I’m in another wedding, watching happy couples all around, and many of my friends have little ones. When did that happen? What happened to all my single friends? Oh, right, they got married. I know, a few of us who still remain single but our numbers are dwindling and we feel more alone with each passing year.

I feel more alone.

It’s been a year since I wrote a post about how this struggle with singleness hit me hard. Far from getting easier, the battle seems to be growing stronger. I mean, really, hormones rage sometimes. I look at all the people who’ve decided as they’ve gotten older that they can’t wait for Mr. Right anymore and the settle for Mr. Okay or Mr. Not-So-Great. Or they toss their faith and morals and get satisfaction in temporary ways. It may be easy to judge them but most of us who are very honest with ourselves can understand a little. I battle my own mind and where it wants to go. I struggle with my own emotions, urges, and desires.

I for one know I’m not strong enough to keep fighting this battle. I get war-weary. I get tired of the battle in myself. I get tired of fighting to protect how it wants to affect my relationship with others. I just want to surrender. Why? Because I’m not strong enough.

I’m not strong enough, but God is.

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 2 Corinthians 12:8-10 NIV

It seems to me, Paul was much in the same boat. He was dealing with something that was too big for him to handle. He was pleading, begging, God to take it away. He didn’t get the answer he wanted, but he was given an amazing promise, one we can hold on to. God’s grace, not our own strength, is sufficient. Even bigger? God’s power is made perfect in our weakness.

In a world that pretty much doesn’t know how to handle anyone who isn’t in a relationship and is choosing to *gasp* wait on God’s timing, I stand out. I’m here, like Paul, to say I’m weak. I’m not strong enough to deal with being single. I’m not strong enough fight all the temptations that come at me. I’m not strong enough to keep discouragement at bay. I’m not, but God is.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 2 Corinthians 4:7-9

I’m always so excited about making this list every year. Some years it has been hard to figure out how out of all the books I’ve read, how to get it down to ten. Some years, it’s been a stretch. This year, the list came together easily. There were only eleven books that I wanted to put on this list and it was easy to cut one out.

This was an early read in the year. While fiction, it helped me process some of my own feelings. The story itself is brilliantly written and powerful. I listened to the audio version and the narration was perfect.

I’ve wanted to read this book for years since it came out. I finally was able to read it during the time that I had Kindle Unlimited. This was not an easy book to read. It was heart-pounding, disgusting at times, and sad. Yet the point of the story and the careful way that things were handled made it one of my favorites for the year. It was a compelling book that examines the value of life – every life.

I read all of Meredith Allady’s books this year and I loved them all. Letters to Julia was my favorite. It has the feeling of a Jane Austen with stronger elements of faith, and a loving family at the center. I enjoyed this book so much.

I’ve almost read this entire series by Charles Swindoll. I wasn’t expecting this book to be so impactful. This was another book that helped me process some of my own emotions. His insight from the book of Job on how to deal with stressful situations while they are happening and afterward was extremely helpful.

One of the things that I love with this whole series is that it reflects life in a powerful way. Joy and sorrow are intermingled in a powerful way. This whole series is amazing, and I think all of them have made my yearly list. It is fantasy at its best.

I have long admired the Edwards family. I’ve read a lot of books about them and I knew they had a connection with Brainerd. I read this book and I have to say I haven’t read another book like it. It was honest about how girls can struggle with feeling attraction and attachment to a man without any encouragement. It also showed a godly way of handling it. This story was also about true love, devotion to God, and self-sacrifice. It made me want to revisit all those books I read about this family and also encouraged me in my walk with God.

This book made me think, a lot. It helped remind me of the importance of a close, intimate friendship with God. Do I agree with the author on every aspect? No. However, as Carolyn Currey examined the men and women of the Bible that have shared a close friendship with God, I was reminded that, despite what the world says, friendship with God is more important than a successful career, a marriage, and children, or any achievements that might seem important.

My brother bought me this series at a time when I needed it. This trilogy, written as kingdom fantasy, has the same feeling as the book of Kings. It feels a lot like Isreal but also feels like the story of our hearts. I think it was about a week before I felt like reading anything else. It left me feeling satisfied, victorious, and hopeful.

While classified as fiction, this story is true. Margaret Landon took the books that Anna Leonowens’ wrote, did some research into some of the events, and produced this story. I read this book with a friend. We had been reading a classic each month this year. This book caught me by surprise. This book was a powerful reminder to me of sticking to the course. I was discouraged because my life is pretty much at the same place it has been in for years, only a little busier. I can’t see a lot of results from my labor and choices. Anna went to teach in a very hostile environment and her months and years in Siam were filled with discouragement. She kept her goal in mind: She could help shape a better future if she stayed the course and taught the royal children. She made a huge impact on the next generation. Things like slavery disappeared quickly when the children she taught took power all because she didn’t give up.

Those of you who have been following me for a while, know that 2017 was a tough year. 2018 was a year of healing. In October, I read this book and realized that one of the things I had stopped doing was praying for big things. I had been so disappointed in 2017, I was afraid to ask for anything but the smallest things. I have a prayer card in my Bible now with a list of things only God can do. I pray for them almost daily. As I worked through the book and workbook, I also experienced some answers for wisdom about some of the smaller things I was facing. This book helped me process a lot of things and helped rekindle the flame in my heart.

Post contains Amazon Affiliate links I wasn’t planning on writing a blog post but as 2018 is drawing to a close, I had some words on my heart I wanted to share.

2018 has been a year of healing. I spent the first day of the year crying because I felt so broken. I wondered if any amount of time would put together the pieces of my heart that had been pounded to a pulp by 2017. I cried because I didn’t want to have to face another year that might hold just as much hurt.

I sit here tonight, looking back at a year that was nothing like what I dreamed, with many of my prayers still unanswered, but with a heart that has healed and is stronger and wiser.

I’ve prayed diligently that relationships that had been destroyed in 2017 would be restored, God said no.

I prayed that my sister Rose, who had her heart broken would find new love it 2017, God said no.

I planned that 2018 would be a year full of writing, instead, God provided two other jobs to take up much of my time.

I didn’t know if I would be able to trust others like I did before, my Heavenly Father has given me the strength to do so.

I wanted to hide from the outside world, God laughed and gave me more new people and places than I’ve had in a long time.

I never thought I would recover, in a sense, I haven’t. I hope I never do, because the healing that I’ve experienced has drawn me closer to God, left me in awe of the day to day grace.

In reflecting on the past year I found myself thinking about Joseph. Since I was a sickly teenager, he has been my hero. He faced overwhelming challenges. He was ripped from his home by his own brothers. He built a life out of nothing with the help of God only to have it ripped out from under him by one false accusation.

As I writer, I’ve often imagined what the darkest moment of Joseph’s life was and what it felt like. I have to think it was a couple of weeks after he had been thrown into prison. He wasn’t getting out, he had a lot of time to think, and he knew how hard it was to rebuild a life. This time, he had even less opportunity than he did in as a slave. As he sat in that cell, I imagine that there came a moment when he realized he had a choice. He could give up and just let his new life wrap around him and consume him or he could believe that God was still working all things out for his good.

We see which path he took. Like anyone, there had to be many times when he was discouraged and the choice was again placed before him. We can see by the results that he chose to trust that God was working things out for his ultimate good.

Perhaps, that’s a lesson that I’m really grasping this year. I don’t understand a lot of things. I don’t understand why there aren’t any wedding rings for any of my siblings. I don’t know why prayers for restoration for broken relationships has been answered with a no. I don’t understand why God has made some aspects of my life so easy when others have it so hard. I don’t really need to.

Perhaps what I’m learning is something I grasped in my early teens and somehow lost: Sometimes, there aren’t answers. We aren’t always told why, how, or when. Sometimes, we have to trust that God is in control and everything is working out for our good. Trusting the One who made all things and knows all things seems logical when you think about it.

I don’t know what 2019 holds, but I don’t need to. I know the One who holds 2019.

This songis from the movie Joseph King of Dreams. It’s been very meaningful to me.

About me

Sarah Holman is a not so typical mid-twenties girl: A homeschool graduate, sister to six awesome siblings, and author of many published books and short stories. If there is anything adventuresome about her life, it is because she serves a God with a destiny bigger than anything she could have imagined.

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While not the best formatted ebook, not an exhaustive history, I really enjoyed this little book. It was a bit of history, with lots of pictures and interesting facts. I look forward to reading more in this series.

I am not going to be to harsh in this review because I didn't finish the book. I got to the chapter of bigotry and I deleted it from my Kindle? Simply put, I think that the author was unbiblical in much of what he said. The book felt lik...

Age Appropriate For: 13 and up for romance
Best for Ages: 15 and up for romance
Since I really enjoyed Duty, I jumped at the chance to review Honor. After all, I love how Rachel writes her romances. Yes, maybe there is a little more pre...