She must've missed out on the big sale at Macy's. The gals love sales!

But seriously folks, I'd like to take a moment to talk about mall violence. You might think those mall cops are there because they couldn't get better jobs, but they face a real threat every day. The pay is low, the danger is high. The only thing they get in the way of perks are ogling the teenage girls in yoga pants. I forgot what I was saying.

Oh yeah. What's up with a white woman terrorist? That's just weird. She needs a right good rogering to set things straight. Krikey.

What's the point of allowing NSA paw through everyone's email, phone records and underwear drawer when they continue to fark up even the most basic of intel activities. "Wife of 7/7 bomber continues to communicate with terrorists, travel to terror havens and lead an attack from the notorious Shish-Kabob terror group". Couldn't have seen that one coming, no sir-ee....