Grieving in an online space

I'm exactly like the other billion people on the social media site; we have a page with lots of friends, and they are all password protected.

But if Facebook keeps us connected in life, what happens in death?

Peter Carlsen is a psychology PHD candidate at Central Queensland University in Bundaberg, and is specialising in mental health and social media.

He says more and more when someone passes away, and their password is unknown, their Facebook pages become online spaces to grieve.

"It becomes a shrine, because Facebook won't actually remove the page unless it's been asked to be done by the relatives," Mr Carlsen said.

"So people who are already connected to the deceased would be able to continue to see posts and to post messages.

"Obviously it's one-sided, but it allows that dialogue, in the same vein of going to see a medium or going to see a psychologist; it's a way of coping.

"It's a way of putting up a memorial that everybody who knew the person can come and see, and at least in my anecdotal experience, I've seen it to be a very helpful thing for the family in helping to move on."

Social media mirrors real life

Facebook released the results of a study around Valentine's Day 2014 on interactions between couples before and after relationships begin.

The study showed a trend of increased interaction and messages, an online courtship of-sorts, in the lead up to a user changing their status from 'single' to 'in a relationship'.

After the status was changed to 'in a relationship', there was a drop-off in the number of online interactions, which the study put down to the couple interacting more in the real world.

Mr Carlsen says in his work, trends are also noticeable in the lead up to cases of suicide or self-harm.

"But it's not a way of diagnosing as such, it's a way of picking up on early warning signs," he said.

"Basically it's an extra way of communication that may save lives and may help people, because depression and anxiety are precipitating factors in suicides and suicide attempts.

"No mental health professional would use it for real diagnosis because you cannot pick up affectations and tone, but it does give a fairly rough idea how somebody is feeling.

"Social media very much mirrors communication in the real world, and it's just another channel of interest to us as researchers as it leaves tangible behavioural evidence that we can observe."

Mr Carlsen can attest to seeing posts after a person has taken their own life but says it is hard to identify this type of post as a farewell message.

"The post that was put on Facebook was only identifiable after the fact," he said.

"In that time I've seen the best and worst of social media. With this tragic loss of a young person, the Facebook wall then became a shrine with friends and family posting.

"Posts that are serious suicide posts may be actually goodbye messages expressing love and may only be understandable as such in hindsight."

If you need help or know someone who does, you can call any of these support services: