Murderer Betrayed by His Own Ass

According to the Broward Palm Beach New Times, Scott Simon was plotting to murder a poor soul with whom he had gotten into an argument with at a Waffle House. The conspiracy was discovered when he “butt dialed” 911. Of course, 911 recorded the entire conversation in which Simon and his friends plotted the murder.

Maybe if he had done more than just side bends and sit ups he wouldn’t be facing a first degree murder charge. He could have also prevented this by not losing it in a Waffle House, following somebody home, and having his friend shoot the guy. Things may look bad for Simon, but really, anyone who is in a Waffle House to begin with has already hit rock bottom.

(This article was written in the Waffle House outside of Lexington, Kentucky.)