Reaction to Melania Trump’s stiletto heels during her trip to Texas was as wide-ranging as Donald’s attention span—frenetic, fast and in disarray. The official verdict really depends on whom you’re asking.

The rest of the nation should be proud — proud to have a first lady who always exudes grace, class, and poise no matter where she goes, what’s she wearing, or who’s trying to knock her off her feet.

Melania changed into sneakers later in the day, for those keeping score. My take: I think she looked nice—the whole ensemble was biker-chick-meets-flight-school sassy. But let’s imagine ourselves back in Melancholy’s dressing room where someone around her (or Melania herself) thought, “wow, this occasion would be perfect for extreme-heel stilettos.” The shoe choice is fabulous for a night on the town dancing with Donnie; not so great for traveling to a region that’s 7 feet underwater. That part’s lost on me.

Well that and her husband’s incoherent and loosely collected nonsense of “look at me!” speeches while there.

Earlier this week I wrote a post on Hurricane Harvey’s Hero Journalists—reporters’ amazing work while doing live stand-ups from the road. The piece spotlighted three people: Ed Lavandera and Nick Valencia, both with CNN; and Brandi Smith with KHOU in Houston. All three not only showed remarkable poise but quite literally stepped in to save people when their subjects were in need.

Griffin was doing a live-remote stand-up when he realized that a guy was trapped in his car and needed help out. Apparently the guy was leaving a Jack-in-the-Box restaurant and thought he was pulling out onto a road, but it was actually a drainage ravine.

You must watch the entire video to get the full effect. Griffin said later that it was a stroke of luck that his crew was out reporting. “If no one was out doing a live shot that fella would be gone.”

The Walls Group couldn’t get back to Houston because of the storm, so they put their pipes to good use and threw an impromptu benefit concert, “Hope for Houston.” As a huge gospel fan, this made my day. I looked up the above song and it’s called “My Life,” which I will of course score on iTunes immediately.

Heidi Stevens—twitter gal pal and excellent reporter for the Chicago Tribute—posted this today from Chicago’s Logan Square and I had to nab it. This pic is the special sauce of what CrankyYank’s final segment is designed for: Curing your Crankies.

CYC is an apology of sorts, a calming epilogue, because I give you unvarnished news that is oftentimes uncomfortable and sometimes gross to read. So “Make America Love Again” is the perfect way to send you guys into the Labor Day Weekend (and it’s the appropriate rewrite of Donnie’s hat slogan).

Oh and ps: Heidi always keeps an excellent sense of humor even when confronted by trolls. 🔵

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Why so cranky?

I strive to be a distiller of life, a curator of cures, a dealer of dope stuff. And I attempt to cure my crankies by snarking my way through all the week’s news. CY publishes at 2 p.m. on Thursdays. [ Tell Me More ]