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Tuesday, September 19, 2006

What Sucks...iTunes Movies

It’s one week later and I have to say the much-heralded “movies available on iTunes era” sucks.

I appreciate the new iTunes 7 set up, got all my album art work going, but dare I say, the movies I’m seeing that are available, can also be found very easily in the “Sucks” section of any movie rental place in America.

There must be some mistake. Did I open up the iTunes new release section today and see as the first title offered “Glory Road”? My local public library isn’t even claiming that as a new release now. So I scroll down, but it only gets worse…

“Cassanova”? Are you shitting me? This is a film (along with Jude Law’s Alfie) that Blockbuster is legally prohibited from selling as “previously viewed” because no one fucking saw it.

Then, “Veronica Guerin”? Veronica Guerin is available on for my iPod? My only question is when will the 1985 Glenn Close vehicle “Maxie” come out? (Yes I said “Glenn Close vehicle”- look it up!)

You're shitting me.

Seriously, stop shitting me.

Coming to iTunes movies?

The iTunes titles go on and on- “The Hot Chick”, “Six Days, Seven Nights”, “Bicentennial Man”. Is this the most cutting edge marketing tool available to a consumer, or a stoop sale in Park Slope?

You want me to watch “Duets” on my iPod? Sorry, I need the full theater experience for that my friend.

iTunes originally came out- kicked ass- allowed me to buy only the Eddie Money tunes I like, without having to buy the albums only to have iTunes movies come out and make me chose between “Gone In 60 Seconds” and “National Treasure”. Don’t make me make that choice. Please.

I guess I’m being a little harsh- not all the titles are bad I guess- they do have “Toy Story” and “The Incredible’s” and “Pirates of the Carribean”. For 12 dollars. Available to be watched on a 3 inch screen.

1 comment:

Anonymous
said...

iTunes movies do suck. I loaded one for a overnight and back trip to chicago. I watched half going there and then it expired 30 minutes before the return home. The 24hrs thing, sucks, I will never get another movie from itunes.

What Sucks Mission Statement

Suckiness surrounds us all, gripping us in a vice-like hold, with the ferocity of a bear trap made of shit. My mission? To offer insight and shed understanding on the vast, seemingly endless, black hole of crap each one of us has to face on a daily basis. And while that torrent of bullshit is both mammoth in scope and unyielding in its advance, at least here it can be called it out for what it is- a lot of shit that really sucks.

So join me- everyday I’ll shine the spotlight on something that sucks. And your comments, until you weird me out, are always welcome. That being said, thanks for stopping by and sorry everything sucks so bad.

About Me

Chris DeLuca is a writer/ producer/ comic currently living in Hoboken, the Prague of New Jersey. He's written for a bunch of TV shows you probably have not watched or heard of (United States of Hip Hop, Nikki & Sara Live, Mob Wives Reunion, BET's Don't Sleep, and Fuse News- see?) as well as Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn, Best Week Ever, Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson and the 12/12/12 Concert For Sandy Relief. He was also the "World's Oldest Intern" on VH1's Big Morning Buzz. In 2009 he created, wrote and starred in the hilarious, and subversive “Mocap, LLC" on Spike. Sadly, he thinks he caused his parent's divorce.