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update

3.24.2011

Sorry for being sort of absent. The last week has been long and draining. We've been to too many doctors with still another appointment tomorrow.

Our sweet little Israel has been growing and changing but according to the doctors not everything is the way it should be. I can tell you that we've experienced deep depression and still great joy in the midst of all that's been happening!

I've been really wrestling with how to address this in a blog setting, how open should I be and what do I keep private? I'm still unsure, to be honest. I do think you should at least have an idea of why I have been or may be sporadic with my posting. The blog is still very important to me and I don't see myself giving it up any time soon. Just know that we're still here and I will try to keep you updated as much as possible as things change.

Israel is nearly 18 months now, full of life, curiosity and laughter. We thank God for him daily.

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51 comments:

I can understand you, i have a little boy of eigth month old and following you and Israel for almost a year... i can not imagine what you must going through. I hope everything is going to be fine, I´m sure. Don´t worry for the blog, we´ll be waiting for you.You have all our support.

Dear,don´t know you or what happens to your sweet little son. So I can only talk in general. I wish you and your family strength and trust for all you have to face. Almost no single life - seen in the whole of its length - will be lived without sunshine a n d moon. All the several shades belong to life. We all know that but in most of our cultures it isn´t so common to talk about. I have made the experience that talking about gives everything the space to be instead of denying it what costs much more strength. The strength you need otherwise. And wonder belong to life, too. Wish you all the wonder you can hold :o)).Ally and Polly

Thank you for being that open; it shows a lot of strength! Life is a journey with ups and downs and keeping that out of blogging or art would feel kind of artificial. On the other hand, we need our secret corners to hideaway. I think you've done exactly the right thing. Looking at Israel, he will make his way. With the love of his parents, everything will be good!

oh poor thing!!! well, you should really think about what your heart says, if it says to share, go ahead... if it says to keep private, we will understand and be here as well! i just hope everything will be just great with little israel, he is so sweet! sending you love and happy thoughts all the way from lisbon :) twiggs

Whatever you are going through...go through it. Go through it however you need to whether that's sharing it on here or not. No apology needed for being absent, do whatever you need to! Much love your way!

I am brand new to your blog, this is my first time visiting. I am sorry to hear about your beautiful Israel, I will be praying for you and your family--peace in your mind, strength in his development and overwhelming joy in each smile you see from Israel.

i am going through something very similar, and my little mickey has that same tshirt israel is wearing here!

my husband and i were, for a while, in deep deep depression. but then one day i woke up and realized - before i knew mickey wasn't developing "normally" i thought he was the best most amazing kid ever! and he thrilled me! and i thought he couldn't get any better! and the truth was, I STILL FEEL THAT WAY! so i decided not to let anything ever get in the way of that feeling, and every morning i wake up overjoyed at my amazing child and honestly, do not care if he is the same as other children. he may be different, but we don't care, we wouldn't trade him for the world! and we don't feel the sadness at all anymore.

but, i know this feeling you are having, and my heart is literally pounding in my chest right now as i almost relive it by reading your post. hang in there, and love that little boy, he is SO cute! i have never posted on your blog before but i do follow it, and love seeing the adorable photos of your boy!

just remember you don't love him any less, and that will really help lift your spirits. enjoy him the way you always have. i hope that he is healthy.

We've come to the same realization, I love what you said. Thank you so much for leaving this comment. Please feel free to email me whenever, it's such a support to hear from others who know where you've been.

I am so sorry to hear this. Before I had my baby boy I never knew what real worrying is. It the worst when there is something 'wrong' with your child. I am sending positive vibes to you, to your beautiful little boy and to you family!

Somehow I missed this post and am just now seeing it...but wanted to say that I am praying for your family...as well as wisdom for the doctors. Our God is big and will take care of Israel, hopefully you can rest in that knowledge. He is such a sweet looking boy :) Thinking of you...

Somehow I missed this post, I'm not sure how. I can only imagine how you must be feeling. I am not a mother, but I love Kai and Asher as though they were my own, so it's the closest thing I know. If either of them were ever dealing with anything, I know I would be sick with worry and heartache.

As everyone else has already said, you are wonderful parents and have created a loving and happy life for Israel. You are already being exactly what he needs.

We are all here for you. Sending you both love and little Israel big hugs!

I have been following your blog since my pregnancy with my now 9 month-old son and enjoy watching Israel blossom into such a lovely little boy. You are in my thoughts and we will be wishing you and Israel the best and praying that everything will be ok.

as a mother myself, I can only imagine what you and your family must be going through. having gone through a divorce and the flowering of a new relationship - I can see how it would be hard to decide what to share and what to keep to yourself. I think that you will find support and love in your readers if you chose to share; and respect for your decision should you chose privacy. Somehow, knowing that there are people out there thinking of you and Israel may give you comfort. You're all in my thoughts.

Sometimes the unexpected can lead to more joy than you might have otherwise...he is obviously a wonderful little boy and will be able to handle any challenges with parents like you behind him. I pray for his health and your family's peace.