This blog is a place for me to vent about my day to day experiences related to my fertility/infertilty struggle.

Monday, February 14, 2011

You ladies Rock!!!!

You all give the best advice and insight. I am glad to know that I am not the only one that has experienced the cyst versus egg dilema (although I wish none of us had to). It gives me confidence in my clinic that other clinics are unable to correctly identify the difference too. I guess I will just roll with it. Although I did post about being frustrated I really haven't been obsessing about things. They will be what they will be. If I had to guess last IVF there were only 2 eggs all along and the rest were cysts. I have to say that the pain I am feeling the last couple of days is exactly the same as when I have a new cyst. As I mentioned before I haven't done this protocol before but I don't think there would be any pain in the ovaries if it was just eggs growing in there. Not sure if I mentioned it yesterday but I also learned that my ovaries are tucked far behind my uterus yesterday (how did I not know that!!!). When the ultra sound tech mentioned it yesterday I thought she was crazy. When I mentioned it to G, he said "yeah, don't you remember Dr. G saying that after your egg retrieval". Uh no I don't....I am pretty sure I was loopy and nobody ever mentioned it when I asked what went wrong. I must have asked G a million times if Dr.G had said what happened to the other 4 eggs he had seen on the ultra sound. Anyways, what difference does it make, add it to the list of abnormalities!!

Hi! In response to your comment on my blog--I love questions--gives some purpose to my unwanted experience :) . And, you are so not ignorant--you are learning. There's a difference. And while I do encourage relaxing and just going with it, that doesn't mean I don't think you shouldn't learn enough to be able to pass whatever you're being told through your own logic meter just like your doing now--all that to say, you will learn more about what's going with each visit you go through. Just think how much you know now about this stuff compared to how much you didn't know about it a year ago! As for your question, the slightly bigger follicles may be just b/c of where you are in your stimming, and the others still have a chance to catch up some so I'd give them a chance just like your clinic is saying--follicles don't all grow to the same exact size as you know, but the goal (that you have no control over, it's a mix of protocols and how your body naturally responds) is to have follicles close to each other in size as you also probably figured out by now--the reasoning behind that is pretty simple--if you have one lead follicle that is way way bigger than the others, the clinic will have to decide whether to endanger that one big follicle to wait on the smaller ones to catch up if that's even possible. And while I am trying to not focus on numbers myself this go around unlike the times before when I'd come home and study every number with dr. goo.gle, I try to remember that as a patient--you have every right to know what's going on with your body (combined with having every right to know about something that you are paying so much for!). Thus, I'm never afraid to ask questions and the why behind what's happening (if a why exists). Asking the same question over and over until it is explained in a manner that makes sense to you is ok (though knowing that some questions just won't have answers). I figure I have an obligation to myself to ask what's going on and the docs have an obligation to make sure I am are informed enough to give, well, informed consent for whatever is going on. Now, that said, the nurses and even the docs studying my case may not be able to explain every happening, but they should at least explain general expectations and the point of things (e.g.--what each med should do, what effect bigger follicles might have, if they report numbers to me what those numbers mean (though I'm not asking for numbers this time...but that's a choice that I've made after all these tries--the first time, I knew my numbers--goes back to what's right for you along that continuum)etc). Hang in there--this is a journey for the faint of heat, but you'll get through it!

G & K

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About Me

After 4 years of trying to conceive I am finally a mom to two adorable twin boys! It has been a long journey, but as they say, totally worth the wait. Thanks to my sister (and her incredible ability to make eggs) all of my dreams have come true. Now onto the struggles and rewards of being a mommy. I am a teacher currently on maternity leave and I am 38 years old (when did that happen).