An Exercise in Absurdity, but Gratitude

For those who have been following the absurd soap opera of my relocation, of my agoraphobia, my mental health… I’m still in my home of the past ten years — though now it is empty. Still trying to cope with panic attacks that include blindness.

(If you are saying “Just get in the car and drive,” then you aren’t able to understand the bizarre soap opera that is my life. So kindly make that statement elsewhere.)

One amazing author answered my appeal for assistance. He is not a neighbor, not nearby, nor even next to my long route. He is not someone who has known me in person for many years. In fact, he has never met me. Yet he would fly 3,500 miles (5,600 km) and then travel in my car another 2,000 miles before going that same distance back home.

So without embarrassing him by naming names, I thank him publicly for being willing (at great effort and time, and at his own expense) to take on this burden.

Though it is his choice, I feel wrong about letting anyone do so very much. So I will try one more time —to get my pathetic self on the highway, before I let him make this sacrifice.

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69 thoughts on “An Exercise in Absurdity, but Gratitude”

It never ceases to amaze me at how our little community here on WordPress and in the writing world will come to the rescue and offer to help each other out, Teagan. It’s an amazing place and one which you are not only a big part of, but such an important part of. We may never have met each other in person, but the hand of friendship is always there.
Sending you lots of hugs and positivity.
xx

Dear Hugh, thank you for your kind words. And you are so right about this community. That someone, so far away would go to such lengths to help me — when those scant miles away don’t even answer a text… It leaves me breathless.
Mega hugs right back.

Accept the offer Teagan. Get the move over and done with, even if you have to do it with closed eyes. This is SO gut wrenching for you, but you can do it, girl! Think how wonderful it will be when you are inside in your new digs. What kind person to agree to do this. It never fails to surprise me – the kindness of strangers. This is a gift from God.

As many others have said, I hope you take up the kind offer. I’m sure it was offered with sincerity. You could use the help, and many of us considered offering, so I hope you allow yourself to be helped. Hugs and blessings Teagan.

Teagan, I had no idea you were going through so many issues with your move or of your stress triggers. The fact that this man would do so much on your behalf speaks volume of how highly you are thought of.
Wishing you all the best in getting settled. {{hugs}}

Oh my goodness! dear dear dear Teagan, I wish I could help you though, by the way, I must fly towards your place; I’d never know how many thousands KM or miles it could take 😛but I wish from deep in my heard that you get all through these ❤ ❤ ❤

Teagan, you are not pathetic, please don’t put yourself down. I have mental health illnesses too and if I could help you physically I would, unfortunately, I live in the UK. you are attempting a very major thing, moving home is one of the most stressful things a human can do. You are brave to do this, Teagan. Massive hugs to you and Crystal from us all here in Scotland. xxx

I thought of offering the same, Teagan, but will be moving my parents in a few short weeks, including packing their house and driving their cats. It’s okay to accept help, you know. There are sweet people all over the world with genuinely generous hearts. Your blog friend wouldn’t have asked if he wasn’t willing. Sending you hugs. ❤

Hi Diana. I wondered how your parents were doing. Cats are not easy passengers.
I’m worried about Crystal, since she is so sensitive even in her own home… But we can’t stay here. Wishing you a safe and easy journey too. Mega hugs right back.

The fact someone is willing to help you drive to your new home makes me feel so much hope in our world. Panic attacks are horrible Teagan and all I can do is send you lots of hugs and a healing angel to help with the drive. Keep us posted and know that there are so many good thoughts and wishes that are being sent to you.

If I wasn’t married I’d be on a plane and driving you there, to me it sounds like a fab adventure for a girl with a camera 🙂 I’m glad someone has offered, take it before they change their mind! That Pistachio won’t wait forever you know 😘

I understand completely, dear Teagan, anxiety is too mild a word for the beasts that claw at our brains, telling us to fear the irrational as well as the rational.
I’ve been reading that some researchers are thinking anxiety might be an evolutionary skip, as in, those with anxiety are ahead of their time, and looking at the world, we may just be more aware. I have a coping exercise that sometimes works…I picture the worst thing that can happen and I figure out how I’d cope, then I picture going backwards and seeing if there was any way I could have avoided the worst case scenario. Sounds simplistic, but it usually works. Then I think about everything I will gain from doing something that terrifies me and what I’ll lose if I don’t. I also know sometimes nothing helps when our bootstraps are so frayed they can no longer be pulled up.
Dear friend, you do what you can or need to do. All of the offers of help (there are still so many wonderful people out there, sometimes we can forget how many but are reminded like a big hug for our brains) just remind you we’re all here for you, one way or another but we are only whispers, you need to listen to your own voice and what it tells you.
Email me anytime. I’d offer to go with you but traveling and my anxiety don’t go well together either.
Sending my love and good good good vibrations. 😉
Mega “Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.” ~Søren Kierkegaard hugs xoxoxoxoxox

That’s an interesting quote, Donna. Thanks for sharing the exercise, although my vision begins to blur just thinking about it. Regarding “all of the offers of help” — there has been only one — including those who are nearby. That is why I’m so grateful to this one person who is willing to do the extraordinary when it would be so much less for a few who are so close. I know you have a ton on your plate already. We’ll do car pool karaoke in spirit. Mega hugs.

I’m so happy to hear someone made the offer to go out and help you get to your new home. I understand your reluctance to take such a generous offer, but it might be worth considering if you have known the person through blogging for some time. Living in an empty house in the place you are trying to escape is like extending your time in prison. You know all to well how much you need to get out here with friendly people, beautiful surroundings and lots of sunshine. The kitties and I are sending good vibes your direction for calmness, clarity of vision and strength to get up and head west.

You’re right. That didn’t escape my notice. I would have been driving straight into it, nearly all the way there. I just wish I had been able to get it all together in early January, like I initially hoped. But I was trying (needing) to save all the money I could on movers…