Hi! I'm Traumador The Tyrannosaur

"I may only have a brain the size of a peanut... wait what was I saying again?"

Welcome to My Life

Rather than bore you with a long life story, I thought I'd share some of the memorablia I've collected from my many adventures.

As I'm really big on geology, I thought I'd set up my memory board as a rough Timeline of my existence.

Please forgive the lack of proper scale. They only make corkboards so big...

If you are interested in any of the items or topics on my board just click on their picture and check out any related posts (some are still under construction at moment...).

Like all (good?) stories mine has a beginning. Only unlike most others that claim it, my story really does start a LONG time ago!

When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth!!!

It was back at the hey day of my kind that I originate from. 65 million years ago during the Cretaceous period, to be precise.

I was born...

Now I can't tell you details about it, for obvious reasons, but my egg was lain in prehistoric Alberta.

Something REALLY bad happened!!!

Then a few weeks or months after my egg was laid, the Dinosaurs went extinct...

I didn't notice

Yet somehow I survived, after a fasion. My egg was buried, but despite all logic this did NOT kill me. Rather put me into a slumber through the ages (and pre-ages!). Millions and millions of years. You know come to think of it, I was really bored!!!

I was discovered

Despite all the odds against it, when I was finally uncovered my egg hatched, and I found myself a Dinosaur in the modern world...

The Explorer

My discoverer was a tour guide named Craig who fashioned himself a palaeontologist. However up until the day he found me, his ambition hadn't gone so well. I wonder if he wishes his luck hadn't changed after finding me?

Being a Dinosaur in the modern era, I didn't growup like any other Dinosaur before me...

I was raised by humans

Craig took me into his home, and as of such i grewup to think more like a mammal most of the time, and not a tyrannosaur...

My First Roommate

Dan also lived in our house, and unlike Craig, he often didn't like the problems and mischief i'd get into

My Mom

i would encounter my mother, after a fashion, only she'd been long dead. only her skeleton remains today, but i guess it's better than nothing.

My Play Mates

When I finally met and made friends with some other Dinosaurs, I of course picked the oddest Dinosaurs a T-Rex could hang out with!

Sadly I couldn't just sit around the house eating and playing video games forever... I eventually entered the work force. The number of jobs avaliable to a Dinosaur are pretty limited though...

I ended up at the local museum

Fortunately my hometown is home to one of the best Palaeontology museums in the world! So I got a job there...

I learned all thing Palaeontology

Naturally while at the Tyrrell I picked up some scientific know how and skills!

The girl of my dreams...

I fell in love with the museum's star attraction, Lillian the Albertosaur... Not that she returned the feelings back in those days!

Till I was fired...

The museum had too many Dinosaurs wanting to work there. So due to me being me, I was one of the ones let go...

The Tyrrell was a huge part of who I was early in my life. Without it I needed a new direction...

There were too many other Dinosaurs...

Unfortunately Drumheller was just overrun with other Dinosaurs. So I wasn't going to be able to stay there, and make a name for myself.

So I tried to find my own space...

I travelled across BC thinking I was travelling back in time. Only later would I find out BC in Canada stands for British Columbia!

I needed help...

Larry the Tyrannosaur

I moved!

To New Zealand

I'm a big deal to the Government!

I work at a museum...

My (almost) secret origin!

Nearly a hundred years ago, the mysterious fossil hunter Francis Slate nearly uncovered my egg. For some reason he left me there in badlands. forced wait for someone else to uncover me...

meaning he might very easily get back on my tail now that i'd stupidly shown off my intentions here on the north island...

little did i realize the most extrordinary thing was going to happen on my way out of the museum...

on my initial tour of the museum on the top floor i'd accidentally stumbled into "someone" while stupidly not watching where i was going... museums should have automated floors so you don't have to worry about watching where you're going, and you can just look at all the cool stuff inside them!...

going to yell at the guy who "ran" into me so hard i was shocked to come face to face with a maori style carving...

the top floor of the te papa is a world famous marae. or in other words maori meeting hall. in maori culture these places were very important to the function and runnig of communities and tribes (iwi in maori... i'm picking some of it up).

this was a modern one. covered in amazing modern style (ancient maori couldn't have produced them if they wanted) carvings and statues provided by many of the iwi of the whole country.

i'm sure for a normal visitor this is quite the spectacle to see... for me it was horrifying.

don't get me wrong people of the web wide world. i was really impressed, and this was an amazing piece of art/culture.

at the same time it was also showcasing all the potential gods and entities that could be after me and these baskets... there was just SO many of them!!!

the whole thing was covered with gods, demi-gods, and atau coming off the surface...

though looking back on the pictures now they were neat as... but at the time with the kete o tewananga, the vessels of all maori magic, in my hot little pocket it was scary to look at all the potential stalkers and hunters who could be after me...

imagine these guys above alive. they didn't look so friendly to me.

these guys had a hint of sinisternous despite their sort of helpless look.

some of them were clearly evil, and their statue representations freaked me out enough on their own!

i was startled turning around and seeing a familiar "face"... whiro!!!

it was only a momentary freightfortunately. this whiro wasn't the greenstonei'd come to "know". it confirmed though that if whiro was in these ranks, that any of the others could potentially show up out of legend and try to get me, and the baskets...

oh right. i started this post about my leaving te papa!

well after seeing the various atau of the marae i decided to skip this room during the rest of my time at te papa. which was easy enough. it is one of the few easy to find and understand places in the museum. its the top level. period! the majority of everything else is below it so if i stuck to those than i couldn't go wrong.

by the time i'd finished spending the whole afternoon wandering the museum, and it was practically closing time, and they gave the 10 minute warning. i decided on one last run (almost literally...) through the place just to make sure. i knew that if the baskets were going to do something it would have to be te papa...

i figured i'd start from the top and work my way down as it'd be harder for them to kick me out the further i was from the entrance.

before i know what was happening one of the kete baskets floated... at least that what it looked like. it felt to me like it lept... out of my pocket and up towards the marae!!!

a million questions went through my peanut sized brain... was this a good thing? were the statues coming to life, and this another trap? should i be scarred? how was the basket floating? what is the square root of 13 346? what should i have for dinner?

fortunately all this mental activity ate up my brain's processing power, and i didn't actually react... had i, i might have interupted the big event... which is good as it turns out there was enough nearly going wrong at the time...

a security guard starting to herd people towards the exit for closing time had snuck up behind me. i think he'd been saying something to me, but i'd failed to notice on account of the mystical situation unfolding in my pocket... er airspace... anyways

suddenly there was a big strong hand on my shoulder. "sir, you have to leave!" he said as though i'ddeliberately ignored him... uh i guess i did, but not how he thought anyway.

without turning around... i wasn't sure if eye contact on the basket was a factor or not... tried to stall him. "one second," i paused of course for no reason, but i made it sound like i had one!

ten seconds later after letting the silence linger into an obvious brush off on my part. "sir i don't want to have to ask again," his forced politeness was wearing thin. i must have missed him in here a lot longer than i'd thought.

"it's just i noticed..." i again drew off as annoyingly as i could. trying to buy precious seconds.

again the guard politely waited hoping for me to explain my clearly rule breaking behaviour. mental note to self this guy was a good at his job. i'm going to have to a lesson from him here for my guarding at the otago.

"you'll have to come back and look at it tomorrow sir..." he began to say when he suddenly figured out what i was looking at. "is that hovering?"he said almost to himself.

before the poor guy could really grasp or ponder the sight before him, 'it' happened.

suddenly the magical tingle turned into a pulse... it was like my heart had become a hydro-pump and my blood was now pulsing my WHOLE body. only it wasn't my heart or blood involved. it's hard to describe...

at the same time the whole room lite up with magic, and the basket dissolved into... well thin air. it just wasn't there anymore. which i guess was the point of the exercise...

the guard saw something, but i'm not sure what. from what i understand normal humans (and dinosaurs for that matter) don't see magical energy like this. "did you just... see that?!?" the poor security guard pleaded with me for an answer. i didn't give him one of course.

i just savoured the immense satisfaction of victory! i'd travelled just over half of new zealand, and FINALLY i'd accomplished 1/3 my mission.

sure i still had more than half of my cargo left, but it didn't matter. they could be disposed of, and there was a purpose to what i was doing. more to the point there was one less thing i had to worry about whiro or other maori deities getting their hands on!