Hello

I am new. I just wanted to say thanks to whoever created this forum. I am a private person so I may not post much unless it is really necessary. I am ashamed to join such a forum but I hope some good will come out of it. I never felt I ever had a support system in my life and I tend to shutdown and not speak out because this world is not only about me. I am fully aware that everyone has problems and I hate taking advantage of people when they show some sort of kindness, as I feel people do to me. I am merely existing in a world that I feel I don't belong in and have lost total faith in human kindness...because it just does not exist!! The only reason why I have not done anything to myself is that I am scared of what is on the otherside IF there is anything! I cry everyday and pray for my death, but I pretend that I am fine to those that I interact with. I want to believe that somebody does care, but it is not true. I wish I can experience happiness and being in love for just a few moments so my life would not be a complete waste. Well, thanks for reading...