Lizama family: Deployment veterans

Deploying: Guam Army National Guard 1st Sgt. Joe Lizama Jr., seated left, and his wife, Mae Lizama, are photographed in front of their Santa Rita house with their children, from left, Joshua, 20, Tiara, 23, and Jose III, 25, on Jan. 17.

With eight deployments over the course of a 23-year military career, U.S. Army 1st Sgt. Joe Lizama Jr. and his family have his pre-departure process down to a science. The family got word of this deployment about a year ago, giving them all the time they needed to prepare home and heart. So for the last several months, they've handled it in businesslike fashion.

After spending a couple of hours with the Lizamas at their home in Santa Rita, it becomes clear that this family not only loves each other and isn't afraid to show it, they also make it clear that they love being a family.

That's how it goes for Lizama and his wife Mae, and their children Joshua, 20, Tiara 23, and Jose Lizama III, 25.

The last weeks before his upcoming departure have been more somber, though everybody will put on their best face to make things more bearable. They've adjusted over the years.

It was difficult for the family for Joe Lizama's first three deployments, all within a four-year stint with the U.S Marine Corps starting in 1989 -- his first years with Uncle Sam.

Stationed at Camp Pendleton in San Diego, Lizama deployed twice to Okinawa and once to the Philippines. The latter deployment caused the most anxiety because it was during the Gulf War.

"Back then can't compare to now. No comparison at all," says his ever-loyal wife Mae, who happily raised her family around her husband's military career. "I had two toddlers back then and his deployments -- they would come without notice. And back then, there were no Family Readiness Groups ... no FRGs."

Joe Lizama says that so many things change when he returns from deployment. He remembers how it was after a 15-month assignment in 2005:

"I come back and see my kids all grown up. I missed my first baby's graduation ... I come back and my first baby, my son -- he's a man," he says, his voice wavering as he nods proudly at his eldest, Jose.

"And my daughter ... I come back and she's taller than I am. And my wife? I'm so used to being in charge in the military but when I came home, she's in charge," he says. "And I'm OK with that."

He deployed four times with the Guard, but the 2005 and 2009 deployments hit home in a household built upon family values. Joe Lizama had missed other events before but his absence was particularly felt at his eldest son's graduation from Southern High School -- he finished Top 10 in a large class. He also missed his daughter's Sweet 16 party and confirmation, as well as his parents' 50th wedding anniversary.

"We could get angry but why?" says Mae Lizama. "This is not about us, this is about our country."

As their children matured, they learned that serving in the military meant much more that their dad going away for months. Joe Lizama's benefits extended to his children and their education. Tiara is a senior at the University of Phoenix and Joshua, a freshman at the University of Guam. Both are studying psychology but plan different career paths. Their education comes courtesy Uncle Sam.

Everyone is older now, with a greater sense of responsibility. Joshua will be the new man of the house and accepts his role and duty to take care of his family. At 20 years old, Joshua -- Joe and Mae's last baby -- is baby no more.

"We have learned to prepare. We know to take care of the house and do the water blasting and painting, take care of bills and any other household paperwork. That's all routine," Joe Lizama says. "But even though I know what to expect, the hardest part ... is leaving my family. Saying my last goodbyes.

Mae Lizama is also part of the Guard team that helps local Guard families cope with deployments and other issues.

Her husband's responsibilities extend past Guam. Joe Lizama is trained to spot signs that soldiers are preoccupied, and as a leader he is compelled to assist. He's already learned to rely on his training and background to keep him alive and alert.

"I like to go with my mind clear, and mission-focused," says Joe. "What we do for the soldiers is the same thing we want with our family."

There is family time on weekends, and that time is always priority. There will be a major family meeting to iron out the final details. And then, 1st Sgt. Lizama will hop on a plane and go take care of business. Mind clear.

Lizama and his family will communicate by frequent texts and phone calls as often as they can -- or better put, as often as the military communication lines allow -- but over 15 months, he'll miss a several family events and one major milestone.

Jose III is going to be a father, so his dad will earn his grandfather stripe abroad. But as much as he'd like Dad to be home, he'll have to be content with Skype or a phone call. He'll miss birthdays, and even his anniversary in July. For sure they are already planning a phone call that day.

As usual, he'll end the conversation with his wife Mae with a familiar line: