Trying to top the Westboro Baptist Church in insanity is like attempting to make a Girl Scout cookie better than the Thin Mint. It ain’t gonna happen. After all, it doesn’t get much more batsh*t loco than rewriting the lyrics to Ozzy Osbourne’s “Crazy Train” to picket the funeral of a guitarist from a metal band. So I must give a tip of my horns to the members of the Satanist Temple, who got close to matching the religious cult’s absurdity when they performed a “same-sex ritual at the grave of the mother of the church’s founder.”

Members of the Satanist Temple performed on Sunday what its spokesman describes as a “pink mass” an admittedly made-up ritual, celebrating gay love, at the grave in Meridian, Miss.

Spokesman Lucien Greaves doffed a headdress made of horns as two male couples, and a female couple recited scripture, lit candles and made out over the grave.

Members then declared Catherine Johnston, the mother of Westboro’s founder Fred Phelps, a lesbian.

The idea to stage a counter-protest by the New York based Satanist Temple after WBC members threatened to picket at funerals for those killed in the Boston Marathon bombings, Greaves told ABCNews.com. (Via)

The reason why Fred Phelps is a pariah is because he is literally worse than 99 percent of the people on Planet Earth. You worship Satan. You’re in the 1 percent.

See, we consider him a wacko because he says that otherwise normal or admirable people (like dead soldiers at funerals he protests) are doing the work of Satan. When you show up to do the work of Satan, you are missing the point of why we hate him.

I could be wrong, but from what I’ve seen “satanists” don’t necessarily believe that Satan literally exists. They’re just aggressively anti-religious and specifically anti-christian and use the whole “worship satan” thing as just kind of a middle finger to christians.

They’re harmless. And frankly being anti-christian is something I can get behind.

This is all very silly. Satan is a verb that means adversary or resistance. Archaeological evidence shows a disparate group of escaped slaves fleeing Egypt probably learned it (as well as monotheism) from the Zoroastrians (who were settled at the base of Mt. Sinai) and misunderstood it as a noun and anthropomorphized it. Hence the concept of the devil as a single individual in the derivative mythologies.