Fast-forward to last weekend, when the kid passed a display of unblemished, promising pumpkins outside the market.

Kid: Can we please try again to make a Halloween pumpkin?

Me: Do you not remember the last few years?

Kid: They’re only $5.

Me: I’ll give you $10 to never again mention the word “jack-o-lantern.”

The kid convinced me to buy the gourd on the conditions that 1. I didn’t need to carve it and 2. I didn’t need to be involved at all. So that resourceful little Halloween-lover got out her paints and decorated it herself.

And we are very hopeful that if we keep it indoors, it’ll last through October 31.