Anyone who knows me knows that I love two things: my kids and football. Sometimes not in that order. I grew up in Ft. Worth in the 70s and 80s and, in those days as we all know, the Cowboys were IT. America’s Team. I’ve been bitter ever since you-know-who bought the team and, IMO, made it a safehouse for ego maniacs and drama queens. But there was a time, in the 90s, when there was a flicker of love again for the boys in Blue and Silver. And it was because of one man. One player. One QB.

That is one Troy Aikman.

So imagine my delight when I, a Highland Park resident, learned that my one true love, future third husband favorite NFL football player of all time also lives in the ‘hood. I’ve seen him around town, buying peppered turkey at the supermarket (Primo Taglio); running on Beverly; tacos at MiCocina; searching his soul at church – all the Parkie places we Parkies go. And now I hear he is moving, which is fine because someone with 10 kids and miniature ponies should move into that big ole’ house he has. But I would like to state my case for the great Number 8 to remain a resident of Highland Park forever.

4441 S. Versailles Ave. Why? It’s across the street from a park, just like his house now. (It was built by Al Hill, Jr. and Candy says Al III sure ain’t getting it.) It’s big enough for all of his autographed footballs and 65” flat screens. And it has 9.1 bathrooms. He has daughters, right?

3601 Euclid Ave. Why? Because it’s just around the corner from his existing home and a stone’s throw from the fire department, (tracking with me here?) Reduced to $4,995,000 from $6,950,000 — that’s cheap, Troy. It’s nice and contemporary and offers the privacy that I’m sure he craves.

3921 Gillon Ave. Why? Gillon is a nice street, fancy neighbors with kids who just graduated from HPHS so he can avoid those pesky under-aged drinking raids on Saturday nights when the parents are at the ranch. $3,295,000 but I would offer less. This house needs a wee bit of TLC but, then again, so does he.

4357 Livingston Ave. Why? Because, he can walk to Marquee Grill and Bar, brother. Need I say more? That’s a nice block, a little more crowded than what he’s used to but it’s pretty low key and I happen to know that their block parties are really fun and somehow they always manage to get the newest design in bounce houses.

I’m no real estate agent. I’ve got no skin in the game, as we football aficionados like to say. I just like the neighborhood we’re in and would like to see you stay in it. And so would all of my girl friends. And the football-playing friends of my 16-year-old football-playing son. But that’s beside the point.

Wherever Troy goes, I hope it feels like home. You deserve it, brother.