And remember, whatever lives in the heart control you. It becomes what you strive for and willing to sacrifice anything to have. It therefore, must be something eternal and never breaks. It must, be something that never leaves. Only one thing is like that : The Creator.

Monthly Archives: June 2015

A busy week when MyPAC consultant contacted me for an interview session and analysis my Reasoning Ability (RA). It’s been awhile I tried to get a good date to set this meeting, and today, Alhamdulillah it went well.

Before the meeting started, we get to know each other, basically I’m the youngest, as always. Well, I have to say that I have done the analysis assessment test before back in 2010, when I was selected for Yayasan Khazanah scholarship. Heck, I didn’t pass the test stage, perhaps I play a lot? Still remember the night before the test, I was having a whole fun day at Sunway (ok, lets move on from this past) tehee

So here is the result for my RA assessment..

Abstract Logic is basically the sub-set and set, and how you linked information to information.. well if you get A for basic math SPM i’m sure u can do it (just a lil bit harder)

Logical Processes is..sorry i forgot what the test about.. but they said that the par average is 40+ and I’m above the average, so consider okay! Yeaayy

Spatial Reasoning is about colouring the object in an object, where you have to find a given shape in a bigger shape.. Very hard for me, honestly i thought i was doing it badly, but it was my highest score. No idea how it happen =_=

Social context, yeah i know. Im lacked with social skills bla bla.. honestly tho, who have time to look into detail in a picture when you are given limited time to complete 50+ questions. I’m impatient.

Numerical reasoning, what all accountants loooove to do, crunching numbers.. It is looking into number’s trend.. such as 1,2,3,4 or 2,4,6,8.. sort of..

Conclusion, consultant told me, if time can be turn back, she would advice me to go for engineering! Why? Looking at my highest mark in abstract, spatial and numerical reasoning. What pop into my mind is kemahiran hidup! have no idea man, I never learn anything about technical or mechanical or civil engineering tho. haha funny.

So she said, becoming a successful accountant is also a good choice since it require my abstract, logical and numerical reasoning. I’m on the right path yaaa 🙂

The important highlight of today meeting is… They recommend me to defer my examination sitting to allow my full commitment to go overseaa~ yeayy 😀 Alhamdulillah syukur, all bless from ALLAH 🙂

Wish myself a very best in future and may my day be filled with amazing people. Ameenn

It was a week ago, as I step out from DTAMS, most sitting examination hall. The hot air blew as I take my first step out. It’s over! 4 years and my life in UKM have come to an end.

There is no party, or insane moment of celebration as I always did. There was just a smile, and wishing goodbye as everyone parted. University have hold so much memory in me. 4 years of my freedom, of learning to discover myself, of falling and rising myself up, of having new friends and losing old one, of what love feels like and how heartbreak can really shattered you to pieces, of how having a crush feels like, of how filthy party look like, of how good of an angel I can be, and of how bad immature person I was.

Memories become a life lessons and gems of what I treasured the most. The story may not end here, but I once cried of how fast I have grown up. To set myself as a whole and to be my better self every single time have always been so difficult before, now, it was like breathing air.

Few days from now, I will undergoing my next orientation for my first professional qualification. And also, briefing meeting for my eight weeks of ASEAN internship with Axiata.

Gloomy skies, cold air. It is my last day in campus after 4 years. Yesterday, I have been around, asking friends for feedback. What they think of me, what do I need to improve, what should I better in future.

Someone who knows me since first year till now, told me..

‘Ila, you are too sombong with others. I know that make you stand out. That is the reason why you are doing so well without caring about others, but maybe yeah, people have been saying that you are a lone ranger. Why don’t you be friendly a bit?’

This is the only comment that make me think of this morning before I packed my stuffs,

Mom have always taught me to be strong. Olders always advice me, that at the end of the day, you gonna fight your own battle alone. While years ago, I was so dependent on a person who I used to trust, who I thought would never leave me. And when I met ES, all I asked is for a prayer while he was away for umrah, to pray for me to be stronger.

Frankly, I do acknowledge how others react around me even tho I don’t really care.

While I was alone, shopping in a mall. Entering so-called luxury shop, and man tease me for buying expensive stuffs, and spending on my friends, spending ‘too much’ on myself. While friends criticize me, I speak in english too fast. And all the saying goes from friends and strangers. They say I was, “specially unique”. I never bother to know what does it mean.

Four years and, I did not make any friends who know me inside out. I don’t have a friend I can rely on. But 4 years taught me, to be strong, to be ambitious, to rise up whenever I fall.

Under the tree, where he was waiting. It was a hot empty evening but he was full with warm love. He say, wait for me, we will catch each other if we fall. In the rainbows and skies they seal a promise.

And he say, we are not leaving, not today. And tho tomorrow comes, they wishes for time to paralyze. Everything was real yet the bleeding never stop.

How could they hold a fragile heart in pieces. They crafted stories, with tears and cuts. Must have run the whole world apart, destiny failed to keep them together. Sing a song, she said. It will mend her heart, she said.

The falling leaves of the tree. Witnessed. How could silent be so loud. Like a twisted dream.

I started today post with Alhamdulillah. So much blessing and gratitude to the Maker for responding my Du’a.

Indeed, most of family members now, and few people in campus know of the news. My first working abroad offer, which is my second experience to work with yet, another multinational company, Alhamdulillah.

Today, I received the formal offer, to which the contract have been changed, into much better. It’s true, when you make sincere prayer, and you let go of all your affair to Him, having full faith in The Most Merciful, He will take care of it all and eased your matter.

Family gathering attended today have bring me closer to the people whom I loved and those who love me. The appreciation and wishes from caring person have made my day. While it also give me things to wonder about, is completing a degree always received such high compliment, when all the good comes from Him, I am a mere person who struggle to perfecting my slavery.

Nevertheless, with such high appreciation comes responsibility, to be a good example to my niece and cousins. It is amazing how close I am with the youngest, to see their anxious feeling in completing their study, now I know how my eyes look like whenever I’m in that state before 🙂

Final exams is coming up real close, and I am preparing myself like never before. So peace and relax, studying every notes in calm, and to have trust in myself for He will always help me in time I needed help.

Till then. Congrats dear self.

Do keep making your future self proud and thankful.

In most sincere and humble heart of wishing you a good life herein and hereafter. Insya’Allah