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Monday, November 29, 2010

I'm Dreaming of McFatty Mondays

I actually miss dieting. (I can’t believe I actually said those words aloud and put them in writing.) I miss the conscious effort of food to exercise ratio to results on a scale. Pregnancy counteracts that equation in every way. I eat well, watch my portions, do some exercise and the scale goes up. It’s a mind-fuck after years of it working the other way.

It is very difficult to find a balance between eating well for pregnancy and dieting in order to NOT gain weight by doctor’s orders. I don’t seem to be able to grasp the concept. So I’m focusing on all the ways I’m going to LOSE the weight after HLB is born.

For years, I had trouble losing weight for myself. I walked the line of trying and wanting to be that healthy version of me and then I started getting the hang of it and eating to suit my body with the new information I have. Now, it’s a whole different story.

I want to be everything I can be, as healthy as I can be for my son. I want to be an active pretty mom that sets a good example and has the energy to go to all his events and play in the yard even after a full day of work and housework. I’m already going to be an “old” mom (which hopefully in today’s society isn’t as noticeable) but I don’t want to be an ugly fat one on top of that.

I have new directions, new goals, new inspiration to be the absolute best and live a very full life so that my SON has the best childhood and experiences that I can give him and that includes being able to keep up with him and play in the yard, go hiking, go riding, and not pass out on the sofa as soon as I hit the door. Some people let themselves go as a mother blaming lack of time on the children.

I can’t imagine, because I want to take care of myself MORE now FOR my child.