First came the Body Snatchers. Then the Night of the Living Dead. Now our nation must face what may the most cunning and relentless invaders ever. Yes, America, I’m talking about Gothardite Zombies for Huckabee!

The reasons for this lack of information are unclear, but one rumor suggests that Gothard possesses a power to cloud the minds of the mainstream media. Despite a growing body of exposes, most reporters have apparently never even heard of Dr. Bill. (The “Dr.” comes from a 2004 PhD from the unaccredited Louisiana Baptist University.)

Ultimately, Gothard blames rock music for Murray’s murderous rampage. “That is the most contributing factor,” said Gothard, who is based in a small town south of Chicago. “It’d be important to see the connection between his passion to rock music and how it ultimately brought this on.”

Now The Cincinnati Beacon has learned that Huckabee’s meteoric rise may be attributable to mindless creatures who walk among us and appear human, but who long ago gave up their free will.

It’s widely acknowledged that zombies travel in groups and Bill Gothard’s minions are also a tight-knit bunch. (Among them are powerful Republican pals like GW Bush billionaire buddy Jim Leininger and Texas Congressman Sam Johnson.) Now, given the opportunity to install a US President, other representatives of the walking dead community have been seen dragging their rotting carcasses along Huck’s campaign trail.

One of the first sightings was in Florida. At the end of November, Giuliani was polling as the GOP front-runner at 38%, followed by Romney at 17%. Trailing the pack was Mike Huckabee with a puny 9%. Less than a month later, Huckabee had surged in the polls, reportedly due to the backing of “white evangelical Christians.” What caused this spectacular electoral turnaround in the Sunshine State?

Facts lead to a terrifying possibility - zombie intervention.

After his disappointing showing in November, Huckabee was endorsed by Florida State Senate Majority Leader Daniel Webster. Webster is “one of Florida’s most influential conservative politicians,” according to the Palm Peach Post. Webster is also - you guessed it - a Gothardite zombie.

Last summer, Daniel Webster journeyed to South Korea on a religious mission, meeting with the country’s president and other political and spiritual leaders. He was joined by Bill Gothard, the head of a $30-million Christian evangelical group. Four months after the trip, Webster ascended to one of the most powerful positions in Florida: speaker of the state House of Representatives. He brings with him 14 years of experience with Gothard’s Institute in Basic Life Principles, where Webster has not only attended seminars, but also taught classes and even made an instructional video that raised money for the institute.

In order to boost Huckabee’s numbers, did someone stick pins in a Rudy voodoo doll? We may never know. But a story in yesterday’s New York Times blog suggests that reanimated bodies are moving north to Iowa:

(After) Mr. Romney delivered a statement, a former Arkansas state legislator, Jim Bob Duggar, and a Huckabee supporter materialized to confront Mr. Romney about the coverage of abortions under Massachusetts’ universal health care plan. Huckabee supporters have been trailing Mr. Romney at his events over the past week, lurking in the crowd and offering up comments to reporters after events, saying they only want to clarify aspects of Mr. Huckabee’s record that they say Mr. Romney has been distorting....At this point, Mr. Duggar, dressed in a brown leather jacket, stepped out from the cluster of reporters and pressed Mr. Romney about the “$50 co-pay for abortions” in his health-care plan in Massachusetts.

What the paper of record failed to mention is that the lurking Jim Bob is a...do I really have to say it?

In fact, the Duggar Family are not only full-tilt Gothardites, they’re also celebrity breeders. Jim Bob’s wife Michelle has produced 17 - count ‘em, 17 - little Duggars, and the kids all have names beginning with the letter “J.” According to their website, such prodigious output has landed the Duggars plenty of media attention:

God has opened many doors for them to share that children are a blessing from the Lord! They have been featured on four Discovery Health / TLC documentaries entitled,"14 Children and Pregnant Again!”, “16 Children and Moving In!”, “Raising 16 Children!” and “On The Road With 16 Children!” They have appeared on national and international TV shows including The Early Show, The Today Show, The View, Italian Public Television, KBS (Korean Broadcasting System), Discovery Home & Health (UK & Australia), Jimmy Kimmel Live, Fox News Network, CNN, MSNBC and others.

With 19 mouths to feed, do the Duggars have trouble making ends meet? On the contrary, they’re in clover: “As a family project the Duggars built a 7000 sqft. home debt free!,” and recently they purchased a snazzy-looking travel bus from a hockey team - perhaps to travel in style along the Huckabee Hallelujah Trail?

While the rest of us are sweating a mortgage and trying to pay for health insurance, how do those dynamic Duggars do it? Well, besides selling real estate, Jim follows the precepts of “Jim Sammon’s Financial Freedom Seminar.”

On the other hand, there are real advantages to hooking up with a zillionaire evangelist. Let’s face it, times are tough. If I could get some help with the bills and all I had to do was become a mindless slave, would that really be such a bad trade-off?

You know, I’ve spent so much time researching and reading Dr. Gothard’s work, all of a sudden it’s starting to make sense. I feel kind of strange and wonderful, like I’m being bathed in a warm, abundant glow.

Respect for Others? or Political Correctness? The term "political correctness" as used by Conservatives and Republicans has often puzzled me: what exactly do they mean by it? After reading Chip Berlin's piece here-- http://www.talk2action.org/story/2016/7/21/04356/9417 I thought about what he explained......MTOLincoln(4 comments)

Fear What I'm feeling now is fear. I swear that it seems my nightmares are coming true with this new "president". I'm also frustrated because so many people are not connecting all the dots! I've......ArchaeoBob(4 comments)

"America - love it or LEAVE!" I've been hearing that and similar sentiments fairly frequently in the last few days - far FAR more often than ever before. Hearing about "consequences for burning the flag (actions) from Trump is chilling!......ArchaeoBob(4 comments)

"Faked!" Meme Keep your eyes and ears open for a possible move to try to discredit the people openly opposing Trump and the bigots, especially people who have experienced terrorism from the "Right" (Christian Terrorism is......ArchaeoBob(6 comments)

See if you recognize names on this list This comes from the local newspaper, which was conservative before and took a hard right turn after it was sold. Hint: Sarah Palin's name is on it! (It's also connected to Trump.) ......ArchaeoBob(3 comments)

Unions: A Labor Day Discussion This is a revision of an article which I posted on my personal board and also on Dailykos. I had an interesting discussion on a discussion board concerning Unions. I tried to piece it......Xulon(4 comments)

Capitalism and the Attack on the Imago Dei I joined this site today, having been linked here by Crooksandliars' Blog Roundup. I thought I'd put up something I put up previously on my Wordpress blog and also at the DailyKos. As will......Xulon(2 comments)

Alternate economy medical treatment Dogemperor wrote several times about the alternate economy structure that dominionists have built. Well, it's actually made the news. Pretty good article, although it doesn't get into how bad people could be (have been)......ArchaeoBob(5 comments)

Evidence violence is more common than believed Think I've been making things up about experiencing Christian Terrorism or exaggerating, or that it was an isolated incident? I suggest you read this article (linked below in body), which is about our great......ArchaeoBob(7 comments)

Demon Mammon? An anthropologist from outer space might be forgiven for concluding that the god of this world is Mammon. (Or, rather, The Market, as depicted by John McMurtry in his book The Cancer Stage of......daerie(2 comments)