Dr. Ruth Westheimer, famous sexpert and pint-sized Twitter savant, could not belieeeeeeve it when Ryan Lochte's mom Ike said in an interview that he only had time to "go out on one-night stands" with women in an interview. So, as one is wont to do in trying times like these, Dr. Ruth immediately released some indignant ectoplasm into the Twittersphere:

Ryan Lochte's mom admits son has only 1 nite stands & he's glad he's single at Olympics. And now in lane 1......

Later, of course, Ike clarified that while she said "one night stands" she meant "meeting Betty at the Soda Shoppe when he also made plans to meet Veronica, which leads to many zany (and yet non-penetrative) hijinks." Jeah! [World of Wonder]

Also, the elder Lochtes are reportedly in debt and might be facing foreclosure. [TMZ]

Khloe Kardashian has not read Fifty Shades Of Grey: "What everyone tells me is that if you're missing out on a sex life, if you read the book, it makes you want to have a sex life. And I have a phenomenal sex life, so I'm not dying to read written porn. I would rather watch porn than read a different version of porn. But, I don't know what it's about." [Celebuzz]

And Kate Beckinsale says that the concept of Fifty Shades sounds "exhausting." As she walks away, this red-carpet interviewer calls out "Your name is being thrown around [for Ana]!" and she responds "Oh, really?" Which surprised me too, since Ana is supposed to be 22 and Beckinsale is 35. [Hollyscoop]

FUUUU, here is Octomom's topless album cover for her single "Sexy Party." [TMZ]

For whatever reason, the Kristen Stewart/Rupert Sanders shots have been reprinted by the Daily Mail and the Google Reader headline reads: "The pictures that drove a steak (sic) through Robert Pattinson's heart." Whoops. [Daily Mail]

Robert Pattinson may take a part in a movie shooting in Australia to get away from his heartbreak. And to elude having a fillet of sole shoved into his ribcage. [The Sun]

The ultimate question here: where does Nikki Reed stand on Stewpatzgate!? When she retweeted the phrase "To be trusted is a greater compliment to be loved," it looked like she was on Team Patz. Then she deleted it when Twilight fans made said assumption, but thanked them for their "passion." [Gather Celebs]

Former Bachelorette contestant Kasey Kahl got arrested for huffing paint thinner and getting into a bar fight. Fun times are fun! [E! Online]

Drake is annoyed by the rumors that he grew up wealthy in Forest Hills, a rich area of Toronto, but says that people can think whatever they want. [NOW Magazine]

Rielle Hunter: still a person, wants to be on Celebrity Apprentice. [Radar Online