Deja Vu Not a Glitch, Officials Repeat

By F. S. Cheak on February 15, 2019

Officials are once again denying that deja vu – the sudden feeling that a particular event has previously transpired – indicates a glitch or change to the underlying computer code controlling our simulation of reality.

“We repeat,” said Special Agent L. Rond at a press conference, “believing that you have experienced an event multiple times is a universal human occurrence. It has no larger implications.”

Nonetheless, rumors of increased incidence of recurrent events have begun to appear online. Social media posts, videos, and weblog entries have cropped up showing purported evidence of a swell in the number of repetitive happenings.

Whether such an increase is real or imagined remains to be confirmed, however. Because deja vu is a subjective experience, it is hard to confirm whether someone is experiencing an actual glitch caused by a defect or modification to the matrix or merely propagating a self-deflecting ennui that causes us to blame the monotony of our pathetic, featureless existence onto the cold and uncaring universe in which we live. It could also be mass psychosis.

Whatever the case, officials are once again denying that deja vu – the sudden feeling that a particular event has previously transpired – indicates a glitch or change to the underlying computer code controlling our simulation of reality.

“We repeat,” said Special Agent L. Rond at a press conference, “believing that you have experienced an event multiple times is a universal human occurrence. It has no larger implications.”