Pre-Release Fun: Cloverfield, Sly Mongoose

I haven’t done DVD reviews regularly for more than a year now, so it’s been a while since I got a crafty little promotional package like this: The publicity pack for Cloverfield, in which the DVD and its attendant publicity materials come in a plastic case designed for archival video tape. It doesn’t top my all-time favorite (that would be the 25th anniversary re-release of Mommie Dearest, which came complete with a Joan Crawford-branded can of bathroom cleanser, which we actually ended up using when we ran out of Comet), but it’s nice to see the publicity folks are still getting cute with this stuff. And it’s nice they sent me this particular DVD, because ever since I saw the movie in the theater I’ve been itchin’ to freeze-frame it so I can actually get a clean look at the damn monster. Jerky-cam good for “you are there” faux-realism, bad for seeing actual big nasty creature. The DVD comes out April 22, in case you were wondering.

Also just arrived, literally three minutes ago: the ARC for Sly Mongoose, the next book from current Nebula nominee Tobias Buckell, who as many of you know lives just up the road from me. Sly Mongoose promises various tangy flavors of ass-kickery, as the guns-blazin’ cover suggests, and for everyone who complains you don’t get enough floating cities over burning-hot Venus-like planets in your science fiction, well, prepare to slake that thirst, friends.

In an interesting bit of trivia, Sly Mongoose’s official release date is August 19, which is also the release date of Zoe’s Tale. Given the simultaneous release of these books by two residents of the same state, each up for one of the two major awards in science fiction, I hereby declare August 19 as “Ohio is Coming To Kick Your Ass With Science Fiction” Day. You may feel as if you’re prepared for the futuristic Midwest onslaught that will go down on this day, but I assure you, you are not prepared. Yea, verily, the pwnage shall be epic. Fortunately you yet have time to fortify yourself. And also to pre-order.

It seems like Amazon is trying to curry favor with the Ohio crowd; the “Better Together” section on the Sly Mongoose page says: “Buy this book with Zoe’s Tale by John Scalzi today! Buy Together Today: $33.60″

Oh, you are such a tease! You are NOT coming to kick my ass with Science Fiction, because I live in the tiny, tiny town of Chicago, and you guys would rather have signings in megapolises like Kokomo. *pout*

So when are you going to come to Columbus so I can get my copy signed? (My wife and I just moved to Ohio last Summer from Phoenix, AZ and we really love it here. I know exactly what it feels like to be a transplant that doesn’t get Buckeye-fever.)

Appropriately, to my mind, August 19 is also Orville Wright’s birthday. We shall indeed celebrate all across The Heart of it All, and fortify ourselves with Bob Evans sausage links, Cincinnati chili and pierogies from Cleveland! And Crooked River beer, whether we like it or not. Toledo can bring dessert.

Mary @9: Harumph. We do have bookstores in Ohio as well, you know. Mr. Haney runs a delightful one off the back of his truck, out back of the Yoders’ silo on Saturday mornings. :P

Chicago is somewhere between Rockford IL and Gary IN – but I don’t remember what exit number it is. There’s something about turning left at the fountain and then drive through the post office, but that’s just crazy talk.

Remember, though, if you have to FLY to Chicago, you have to use these regional airports at Orchard Place (ORD) and Midway (MDW). Apparently Chicago isn’t big enough to have its own airport (CHI).

No one called CGX anything other than Meigs Field. There was also an airstrip in Grant Park which was closed following the 1919 Wingfoot Air Express dirigible disaster.

But since Meigs (CGX) is no more and as far as I know there has never been a Chicago airport (CHI), my original statement stands, especially in the tongue-in-cheek spirit in which it was written. (grin)

That’s even further away from me than Kokomo–I wasn’t dissing Ohio, which gets more than its fair share of Scalzi time. There was a Scalzi-Buckell joint signing extravaganza (not to be confused with a joint-signing extravaganza) in Kokomo last year, but it’s 3 hours away from me, and I had to work that weekend. There may have been some secret Chicago appearances too, but I assume they were overwhelmed by the inescapable pull of the ORD gravity well/pocket universe.

Like that bucket of rabid crabs! More accurately, like the file extension lists of somebody’s–wait, you fixed it. Just to spite me, I betcha.

I’m guessing you’re on Safari, Bill. Am I right?

Why, yes, I am sipping a lime rickey whilst shooting tigers from the back of the rajah’s elephant. It’s jolly ripping!

Oh bloody hell! I fell off and landed on a fox that’s on fire! I’m on firefox! Clive! Be a good fellow and shoot the cursed thing! I’m spilling my rickey and all!

Wait–what’s that enormous stomping I hear? Why are all our Japanese sherpas running away and screaming “MOZILLA!!”? Odd wogs, these Orientals.
I say, fellows–any of you chaps smell a giant radioactive lizard, too? Well, it can wait until we’ve had a spot of tea.

Oh, Watkins? Wizard job with the filming, but could you hold the daugerrotype camera steady? And why won’t the stomping stop–
OH! Is that the head of Lord Nelson’s statue bouncing down the street? Here, in India? Well, there’s a bit of a puzzler!

Watkins, do investigate. And bring back some butter for the crumpets. No, off with you now. And ask that large fellow to keep the stomping down.