This blog is solely written to convey the many thoughts and feelings I, Alicia Marie, experience throughout my day to day life. Along the way, I hope to bring my readers something they can relate to. My purpose is to make people smile, and to cry (tears of joy, that is), and to make them feel like they're not alone in this world.

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Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Aftermath of the doctors visit...

With saddened hearts, Luke and I made our way back to our car after the doctors appointment. As soon as I sat in the car, I pulled out my phone and called my mom. During the appointment I had received a text from both my mom and dad asking me to call when I got out. Since moms text was first, I called her. I told her what the doctor said and all the sudden the line went silent. I know it must have been hard for her to hear what I told her. I can only imagine what it's like being a mom that's 5 hours away and can't be there for her little girl when she needs her the most. I sensed the sadness in her voice after she heard the news. We talked for a few minutes then I let her go. I knew that I had to get away from the doctors building before I lost it.

I slowly made my way out of the parking lot and then on to one of the main streets in Springfield. I drove around for what seemed like forever before I finally turned to Luke and asked him where I was supposed to be going. As I told you before I very much dislike driving around town in traffic and not know where my destination is. In his attempt at making me feel better, Luke said that I could choose anywhere I wanted to eat for lunch. Since I was on the south side of town, I chose to go to Cheddars. I had never been to Cheddars, but I have heard many good things about the restaurant, so I thought I would try it. After looking over the menu, I decided on a half rack of Honey BBQ ribs and a (what ended up being ) tiny piece of steak. I know you probably don't care about what I chose to eat, but I promise that I'm telling you this for a reason. We received our food and began to eat. The flavor of the ribs were amazing, and I began to chow down. I told Luke that we may have just gotten bad news, but at least we can enjoy a great meal! Oh boy was I wrong...on my part that is. I had only gotten half way through my half rack of ribs when I realized that my mouth felt funny. I finished the food in my mouth and immediately I realized something was different. While devouring the delicious ribs, a tooth towards the back of my mouth had broken off...IN HALF! I had a small cavity, but I thought it wasn't a big deal because it was very small. But, within the first few minutes of eating our food that little cavity became a huge hole in my mouth. I was SO grossed out. I asked the waitress for a box and left. Was it not bad enough that had a bad doctors appointment? Could we not have eaten a really good meal to help "comfort" us during our hurt? Obviously not! So then I was the girl with PCOS AND a gaping hole at the back of her mouth!

We left and I was pretty upset. It just seemed like nothing was going right. All I wanted to do was get home and crawl into my King sized bed and sleep until this horrible dream was over! Well, I didn't want to be rude, so I asked Luke what he wanted to do next. He then replied with, "I don't know" which allowed me the excuse to go home! I made my towards our home when all the sudden I hear, "I know what we can do." I sighed and asked, "what can we do?" I think I should have just pretended that I didn't hear him, but being the wife I am, I HAD to have a response. He then proceeded to tell me that "we can go to walmart to buy a present for the couple at our church who had a baby shower." We had forgotten to buy a present for them, so WHY NOT go purchase baby things for someone else right after we were told I have PCOS and that it will be EVEN HARDER to conceive our own child. Needless to say, that upset me. I was in the middle of telling him that I just wanted to go home and not go anywhere when traffic began to get backed up. By the time our car had caught up with the stalled traffic, we were DIRECTLY in front of Babies R Us. Talk about obnoxious! The worst part is that we had to sit there for what seemed like an hour (it was really 5 minutes), but it was TOO long!

So, let's recap my day on Monday.

Diagnosed with PCOS

Broke a tooth in half while eating lunch and didn't get to finish even a quarter of my meal at the restaurant.

It was suggested to me that we should buy BABY items for someone else while I'm distraught about my diagnosis.

3 comments:

I'll be honest kiddo I have no idea what PCOS is but it sounds like your hurting just as bad as I am right now. I understand a broken heart. I listen to your song and the words are describing my feelings or helplessness right now. You are right though we both need to shake it off and let God handle this. It's so hard to though isn't it?I want to go to sleep and never wake up. I'm sorry darlin. I know you are hurting too and I'm not helping. I'll go now. Hope you have a better day today. Ironically my back molar just busted in half 3 days ago.. lol

This post hit me even harder than your last one. I wish I could take you out to lunch or do something to help. If you need anything hemmed or altered, I would totally do that if it would make you happy for even a second and I hate altering LOL! That's truly saying something *giggles*

About Me

I'm a 24 years old foster mom to three kiddos ages 3 and under. Not too long ago I felt that I knew what life was going to be like. I would have a full time job, 2 kids, a house, and two dogs. Like most things in life, we do not always get what we dream of, but I can say that I have been given more than I could ever imagine for myself. I'm here to share my experiences--the good, the bad, and the ugly--and in turn I hope to inspire you and bring hope to your life.