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Hi all,
I'm sure you've noticed some changes in the forums. We've again had to do some updates, so that's why things may look a little different. Nothing major should have changed.
Also, we are going to start adding advertisements sensitive to our community on the boards. This is something we are experimenting with, and we will certainly make sure they are in the best interests of everyone. We want to make sure our forums continue to stay accessible and cost free to all of our members, and this is a way to ensure this.
If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to privately message me or email me at Konnie@beyondindigo.com.
As always, we will be here with you,
ModKonnie

That is what many of us have been thinking, w2. Today I had company(youngest daughter and her kids) and all the time that they were here I was fine. Then I was thinking of something with sentimental value and I'm so sad because I'm pretty sure it disappeared. It seems kind of dumb, but I wish I still had it. One day at a time... maybe someday things will be better for you and for the rest of us. I need some coffee.

Hey, widower2 and mgilbertson, thanks for your replies. w2, I hate for you to still feel sad. And mg, let's hope this doesn't go on forever! I did get out with our oldest daughter, but I'm ready to start crying all over again. I think I'm going to write my memoirs in a red hardcover book. I hope it doesn't get tear-stained!

chicagobelle, dsmurph, and Silvergirl, thank you for responding. Today is another horrible day so far. I remember the first time (in 1969) I whispered, "I love you," and I just can't believe he's gone. I'm sorry for your losses as well. I hope our daughter can go shopping with me when she gets off work. You're right, Silvergirl, that usually helps. I just feel overwhelmed with grief. He's the only man I ever loved.

I was looking at our family trees and everyone lived longer than my husband did(except one of his brothers who was a heavy drinker and smoker), but he had a grandmother who died of cancer. I expected him to live longer than he did. Maybe we always expect that. There have been so many advances in medicine. Why not a cure for cancer? Or a test that would tell yoou right away that you have cancer cells in your body?

"You hear that knowing someone is going to die makes it easier when their time comes; I am here to tell you that doesn't seem true. " I don't see how it could be true, but I haven't lost anyone suddenly, and I don't think there can ever be a loss as great as losing a spouse, unless it's a child. Anyway life is lonely and sad right now, but I take one day at a time. My husband was diagnosed with cancer in May 2012 and passed away in September 2012. The best we can do for you is tell you that you can talk about her here and we will try to cheer you up if possible. Humor helps me a lot and my husband was always doing something goofy, so some of my memories make me laugh. I thank God for laughter!

I don't think it's a betrayal. But I can feel like I'm coping and then fall apart the next day. During the first couple of weeks nothing seemed real. I thought something was wrong with me if I wasn't crying. Later I talked to my daughter and she said the same thing had happened with her. Aren't we on an emotional roller coaster?

Unbelievable! My heart aches for you. My husband of almost 43 years was diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma on May 10, 2012, also. He was in horrible pain throughout the ordeal. One time he started crying at the hospital and I cried with him. An angel date is the day the person passed away. My husband died the first week of September. Thankfully, before he was diagnosed, we had bought funeral expenses insurance and had purchased a cemetery plot. The headstone that I selected was put in place a few days ago. I saw it for the first time today. I know you're having a hard time as many of us are. I just pray to get through one day at a time. If the hospice counselors aren't able to help, I suggest talking to your family doctor about an antidepressant. Ask for one that doesn't cause weight gain. We will be here to listen whenever you feel the need to share, Tab.