Green Room

Entomologists Bugged By Rush Limbaugh, Beetles Not So Much

Entomologists are working on ways to control tree-destroying beetles, so they figured they’d try to annoy the bugs by blasting the Rush Limbaugh Show into trees:

Richard Hofstetter, an entomology professor at Northern Arizona University who worked on the project, told Discovery News that “the most annoying sound” his colleague, Reagan McGuire, “could think of was Rush Limbaugh or rock music.”

McGuire started to pump the sounds of Limbaugh into portions of infested tree trunks brought into their lab, but Hofstetter said McGuire “could not bear listening to Limbaugh, so he ended up playing Rush backwards, which still kept the voice and intonation the same, but the words were meaningless.”
[…]
He and his colleagues found that while Limbaugh and the heavy metal initially bothered the beetles, the insects mostly ignored the sounds after a while.

I tried the same method to scare liberals out of my wallet, but it didn’t work.

In the end though, blasting Rush Limbaugh into trees not only didn’t make the beetles stop destroying the trees — but now they also want Obama to fail. Way to go, guys.

Hopefully Rush finds out about this and figures out a way to say something so when the entomologists later play it backwards, they hear something like “Joe Biden is the devil!” That’d freak them clear out of their Birkenstocks.

The entomologists’ experiment did see limited success because some beetles, after exposure to Limbaugh, stopped consuming trees long enough to attend tea parties

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Your Arizona state and federal tax dollars at work. I’m surprised Hofstetter didn’t spend another 5-6 figures in public money on a study to see what insect reactions would be to watching several hours of Glenn Beck on Fox News.

Let’s guess how much government granting was involved in this research.

Hofstetter claims this wasn’t a political statement on the school website. They just couldn’t readily come up with a different angry voice intonation. Lend a hand time: Olby. When recordings of his statements are played backwards it clearly says “I s*ck”.

They should try hillary clinton’s screeching to a crowd about their rights to disagree with ANY administration. She gets so shrill while trying to shout over the crowd. It works on my cat, I played it every time he tried to scratch the couch for a week straight. Now he won’t even go into the living room.

Even playing Rush backwards should make the libs intrigued enough to listen to it played forwards. Now that they’ve wasted our tax dollars on sounds as a means of killing the beetles, maybe they ‘d like to appear as real scientists and find something that works so the West won’t be without trees at all in a couple of years. People in the rest of the country have no idea just how wide spread the devastation is all over the western US.

I was expecting to hear that the beetles broke out into legions of autonomous groups that thrived beyond any egghead scientist’s wildest expectations. My guess is that’s exactly what started to happen, so they dumped the data and then ran the soundtrack backwards so the beetles couldn’t hear a coherent message. Imagine where that puts academia in the animal kingdom hierarchy — clearly they fall somewhere below beetles, since their parasitic existence is retarded by the sound of Rush.