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Monday, April 27, 2015

Jekkub gripped my hand, squeezing my fingers till I thought the bones would crunch together. It didn't matter. Even if I couldn't hold a pen after this. We'd come this far together. I wouldn't pull away from him now.

“You skeered?” Collum sneered at us, puffing out his chest as if he actually had any importance. He didn't matter either. He strutted in front of our cluster of novices, supposedly preparing us to enter the Glade, but doing his best to add to the terror we all felt.

“I heard one novice went in and never spoke again…” A whisper came from the back of the group. I recognized Claret’s voice and shushed. Not helping.

“I heard one came out star raving mad, and they've been locked up ever since. Only speaks gibberish…”

“Shhh,” I hissed between tight lips. “Not. Helping.”

Jekkub squeezed harder, and I squeezed back. My penmanship was definitely in peril.

“Marris,” Collum snapped. I hadn't though Jekkub’s grip could tighten any more. I glanced to him and gave a sharp nod. His hand slipped away, and I squeezed his fingers before he was gone. I stepped forward. Before Collum could goad me, I said firmly, “I'm ready.”

If Collum spoke as he ushered me through the door, I didn't hear it. I was deafened by the roar in the Glade. The heavy doors swung shut behind me, and I stood still, hands balled into fists, heart racing, breath in fast gasps. Panic. Fight or flight. No room for thought. I forced my hands into motion, left over my diaphragm, right over my chest. Slow breath, slow heart, fast mind.

The sound echoed all around me, a continual roar at first. “Words flow like water,” I remembered Hollew, our mentor, walking around a stone basin, trailing his fingers in the clear water. “Let them flow. They'll wash over you. Around you. Through you. Receive the words that have meaning for you, and let the rest flow on.”

The roar of sound was words. But this was no flow, this was a raging storm. A maelstrom. I shook my head and closed my eyes, stepping forward. My hands pressed harder against my robe. Slow breath. Slow heart.

“...fast mind…”

I froze. Tilting my head, I listened. The roar was words, spoken, sung, chanted, in a million different voices, different languages, all at once. How could I make sense of any of it?

“...flow..."

I pulled my right hand away from my stomach and swept it in front of me. I felt cold, like water against my skin. I swirled my hand in the air and felt ripples wash over me. The solid roar changed as I swirled my hand. In it,out of it, came streams of voices, single threads I could catch and follow for a moment, before they were swept back up in the roar and washed away.

I reached out my left hand and waved it with my right. I felt the sounds wash over me, heard the streams of words flow, against me, through me. I laughed and raised my hands, waving them like the music leaders I loved to watch around the village night fires. The words flowed, and I swept them into music around me.

Finally, the streams, the roar faded away, and I stood in the middle of the Glade with my arms raised high. I dropped the down, once more pressed against my heart, my stomach. Yes, the words still flowed. I was ready to carry them out of the Glade and into the world.

The doors opened before I reached them. Collum stood ready to gloat at my failure. The words flowed. He didn't matter…

Untrue. I stopped in front of him and pressed my hand to his chest. “It's your turn, Collum. There are words you need to hear.”

He paled, unresisting as I pushed him through the doors and pulled them shut behind him.

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Favorite Quotes

You have to start somewhere in order to end up somewhere good!~Margaret S. McGraw

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Be kind, be brave, be fierce, be love.~Laura Anne Gilman

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Some things in life cannot be fixed. They can only be carried.~Megan Devine

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Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. ~Mark Twain

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Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars. ~Casey Kasem

When opportunity puckers up, lean in for a smooch. Only a fool tells the angels to come back tomorrow.~Steven Barnes

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Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.~ Dalai Lama

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We’re fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance.~ Japanese proverb

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No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.~ Aesop

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Everything flows, nothing stays.~ Heraclitus

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Balance, always a balance. Work to give life purpose, play to lift the heart, music to soothe the spirit, love to give one strength. One cannot ask for more.~ Pelzmantel, K.A. Laity

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Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.~ 1st part paraphrased from J.M. Barrie, author of Peter Pan; 2nd part from either Plato or (more likely) Philo of Alexandria

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If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish ulterior motives... be kind anyway

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies... succeed anyway

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you... be honest and frank anyway

What you may spend years building, someone may destroy overnight... build anyway

If you find serenity and happiness, people may be jealous... be happy anyway

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow... do good anyway

Give the best you have, and it may never be enough... give the best you have anyway ~ Mother Teresa