Luke Schenscher’s game-used shorts!

I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of anything I’d rather spend my hard-earned cash on than a pair of game-used shorts that once adorned the sweat-soaked man region of Chicago Bulls legend Luke Schenscher. Just think: For only $26.99 — plus shipping — these babies could be yours. (Presumabaly, the seller either washed or at least Febreezed them before putting them up for sale.)

What’s that…you don’t remember Cool Hand Luke? The undrafted, seven-foot Aussie out of the Georgia Institute of Technology? He played 20 games for the Bulls back in 2005-06, and I guess you could call him sort of a poor man’s Aaron Gray. Yeah, I know. His stint in the Windy City was pretty forgettable, with his best game being a glorious 10-point, 4-rebound, 1-assist virtuoso performance in a 95-66 home win over the Portland Trail Blazers. Sadly enough, in that game, Luke outscored every member of the Blazers except Zach Randolph.

Even sadder is the fact that the auction isn’t for the shorts Luke wore in that career-best game. They’re from a 2006-07 preseason contest…that happened shortly before the Bulls waived him. And the sadness doesn’t end there. Take a gander at the best picture the sellers were able to find of Luke’s tenure with the Bulls: Him playing 7-11 defense and getting scored on by (I think) DeShawn Stevenson.

On the subject of eBay money-wasters, would you believe that somebody is trying to sell tickets to Game 6 of the Bulls-Celtics series? The “Buy It Now” price: $2,653.60. The worst part — I mean, other than the fact that the game happened over a week ago — is that the seller is charging this price for 200 level tickets. But then again, he/she probably figures that anybody looking for tickets to a game in the past already has a time machine, and anybody who can traverse the mists of time probably doesn’t have to worry about money anymore.