The national anthem shall be changed to America the Beautiful; an accessible song with a solid melody and natural meter; and the Star Spangled Banner will be consigned to history, where it will be of much interest to our eventual tone-deaf robot overlords

Daylight Savings Time shall be abolished. Trying to fool the sun sets a bad example for children and weakens our moral fiber

Calvin Coolidge shall be worked into Presidents Day somehow. We’re long overdue for rewarding people who do their job quietly, with no drama

We shall come up with a simple way to properly fold the US Flag that does not require two people

Or his supporters do anyway. I got two spams this morning telling me how only Ron Paul can save us from the coming dark age. The fact that he has fans among the 9-11 truth movement is troubling, though I know of no evidence that he sympathizes with that weirdness.