Food for folks who have yet to figure it all out

Apricot + Sriracha Glazed Tempeh Bowls

Let us add skiing to the running list of activities I am incredibly dismal at.

I did worse than even I expected of myself.

Think inebriated baby giraffe tries to stand for the first time.

We get to the resort, I get all suited up – my pants came with cayyutttteeeeee suspenders! I’m feelin’ myself. I don’t rent a helmet because, like, I’m not going to be doing anything crazy enough to hit my head. I get out on the powder (as we mountain people call it) and scoot in my skis a couple of times & immediately tumble to the earth. It is there I think, “you idiot, get a helmet.” So once I’m locked into noggin armor, I get back in the skis, but am now unable to move. I am, however, skilled at sliding backwards, but apparently that’s not how it works. A few minutes of that and I think, I could keep doing this or I could be in the heated lodge…….

I was taken skiing every year because my father was obsessed. He was really good. My brothers were really good. My mother used to take the opportunity to bake her face on a sun lounger wearing a white fur hat and Jackie-Os sipping inebriating vin chaud and I was forced to try try and try again. I am not cut out for sliding sports. NO skatee, no skiee, no snow boardee for me. Just hang out in the lodge. It’s for the best. You can always pretend you were on the slopes before everyone else or just skied an entirely undiscovered off-piste. I have all the moves and I have your back on this one.

The first time I ever skied I decided to take lessons, since I’m a Texas gal and not much snow there. The first time down the bunny hill I skied down just fine, except I kept going, and going, and going until I finally crashed through the lift line fence and ended up underneath a chairlift of people who had just loaded up. 🙂

Toddy Bar…..That’s where I would have ended up to. Skiing has never and will never be on my bucket list for I’m 100 percent sure I would go down hill bobbling like a beanie baby. I love your baby giraffe comparison (LOL).