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Flights from Hell.

Caught a bit of the documentary last night about (mostly) pissed up travellers kicking off on planes and this has been in the news a bit recently given the increases in arrests and Ryanair pushing for a two drink limit.

Was having a think and I can remember at least 5 occasions when I've been inconvenienced, at the very least, by drunks. Including having police come on board to remove someone before we took off. Most recently when a slaughtered bloke sitting in one of the emergency exit seats refused to move to another seat and we had to do circuits of the airport while the cabin crew tried to persuade him to swap with someone who hadn't been drinking their own booze on board. It took the intervention of another passenger to tell him in no uncertain terms what he was going to do to him if he delayed our landing any longer to get him to move and we could get down.

I think on every occasion that I've experienced someone being an utter twonk with the cabin/gate crew the person has given off the "complete pain in the arse" vibe well before they reach the stage where it becomes a problem so maybe the airline/airport could take a stronger line but it's a difficult call for them.

I never drink on board myself so Ryanair's suggestion of two drinks seems a reasonable compromise to me, others will disagree I'm sure.

Anyone had any airborne nightmares they'd like to share or think the two drink limit is unreasonable?

Comments

Thought it a really good watch although so many examples pissed me off due to passenger behaviour - Definitely dont think the two drink limit is unreasonable, especially as they were saying that due to cabin pressure its easier and quicker to get drunk when on an aircraft than it is anywhere else. The other problem though is like one pilot was saying... These people are kicked out of their Ibiza hotels at 10am, dont have a flight back until later that night so have nothing else to do but drink so will be long drunk by the time their flight is ready

No excuses for bad behaviour but let's not forget the thousands who go by plane after a few drinks and don't cause problems. My mate is a nervous flyer and can't get on the plane without several whiskies beforehand.

I usually have a couple of drinks when I'm flying. If it's a longer flight, I'd anticipate having a bit more than that - to pass the time, to help me sleep, whatever.

If I had to make the choice, I'd rather go without booze and not have to put up with the arseholes described above. However, it monumentally pisses me off that the majority that know how to behave might have to make concessions because of the behaviour of a retarded minority.

I'd rather go for stricter punishments for offenders. Taking their passports away ideally - can't imagine many of them do our national image any favours when they get to their destination.

I think it depends on how people take their drink and their manners after.

I go to Dublin a lot for business and often get the first flight out and the last flight back. I have been absolutely hammered on the flight back but generally just sit there watching something on my I pad or sleeping, or even on stag do's ive never been in a group that gets out of order despite having 8 pints before we've got on.

Thought it a really good watch although so many examples pissed me off due to passenger behaviour - Definitely dont think the two drink limit is unreasonable, especially as they were saying that due to cabin pressure its easier and quicker to get drunk when on an aircraft than it is anywhere else. The other problem though is like one pilot was saying... These people are kicked out of their Ibiza hotels at 10am, dont have a flight back until later that night so have nothing else to do but drink so will be long drunk by the time their flight is ready

It was that one yes and while he had a point about hotels chucking clients out at lunchtime and leaving a solid 10 hours drinking time, there's a large degree of self responsibility to these things too.

Is it wrong to admit to having a chuckle at the poor bloke with tourettes shouting out "I've an AK47 in my back pocket" going through security? Must be an awful thing but I think even he could see the lighter side of that and glad they took a sensible view and didn't get all arsey with him as he has enough to cope with.

I usually have a couple of drinks when I'm flying. If it's a longer flight, I'd anticipate having a bit more than that - to pass the time, to help me sleep, whatever.

If I had to make the choice, I'd rather go without booze and not have to put up with the arseholes described above. However, it monumentally pisses me off that the majority that know how to behave might have to make concessions because of the behaviour of a retarded minority.

I'd rather go for stricter punishments for offenders. Taking their passports away ideally - can't imagine many of them do our national image any favours when they get to their destination.

Agree on stricter punishments. An instant 5 year flying ban would do for starters.

No excuses for bad behaviour but let's not forget the thousands who go by plane after a few drinks and don't cause problems. My mate is a nervous flyer and can't get on the plane without several whiskies beforehand.

Exactly.

The trouble is that groups of lads are excited for a week or two away, drink too much and start showing off by acting daft on the plane. As soon as anyone takes exception the response is usually one of aggression and then the crew are left with a decision to make.

It's staggering how often this is the cause of diverted flights and even flights forced to turn back to the airport.

It would make more sense to single out individuals who act like this and give them a slap on the wrist etc. than to ban or limit drinks for the polite,(sloshed), respectful majority.

Once travelled to Jamaica from Manchester and lucky for me there was a crowd of Geordies going out there foe a wedding. They were already drunk when they got on the plane and there must have been about a dozen of them, not sure as they were spread around the plane, presumably so they could piss everyone off. I noticed the cabin staff still were quite happy to sell them more drinks including champagne. You can imagine a 9 hour trip with a bunch of rowdy drunks on board shouting to one another up and down the plane, two were sitting next to me and one managed to lift his tray up while his full glass was still on it, obviously it went on me as well as him. If the passengers are drunk when they get on, they should be warned that they either get off or they will not be able to buy more drinks, but no airline is going to do that, are they?

Thought it a really good watch although so many examples pissed me off due to passenger behaviour - Definitely dont think the two drink limit is unreasonable, especially as they were saying that due to cabin pressure its easier and quicker to get drunk when on an aircraft than it is anywhere else. The other problem though is like one pilot was saying... These people are kicked out of their Ibiza hotels at 10am, dont have a flight back until later that night so have nothing else to do but drink so will be long drunk by the time their flight is ready

It was that one yes and while he had a point about hotels chucking clients out at lunchtime and leaving a solid 10 hours drinking time, there's a large degree of self responsibility to these things too.

Is it wrong to admit to having a chuckle at the poor bloke with tourettes shouting out "I've an AK47 in my back pocket" going through security? Must be an awful thing but I think even he could see the lighter side of that and glad they took a sensible view and didn't get all arsey with him as he has enough to cope with.

I only turned over when the bloke with Tourettes had appeared so missed the AK47 reference... Thought it harsh that his Tourettes is an issue with some passengers, yes it can be horrible to hear someone shouting "Planes going down" (as he said at one point during the interview) yet surely it can be quite easy to tell if someone has the issue because of the tone of what's said.

The worst experience I've had was in Virgin's Upper Class cabin on a flight back from Vegas with the newly married Ross Kemp/Rebekah Wade and all their hangers-on. Low-life scum doesn't come into it - the state of the cabin after the flight defies description. At that time Kemp was playing Grant Mitchell. Now while I'm not a violent man I really did have a strong desire to deck him on the way off.

As for restricting booze on flights, no. I'm with David "52 Stubbies" Boon on that one.

I am not so sure the problem lies 100% with the alcohol consumed on the plane. I flew from Luton the other week and when we arrived in the terminal at 05.00 in the morning the bars were packed and people were drinking pints, wine and shorts as if it were the evening.

The worst experience I've had was in Virgin's Upper Class cabin on a flight back from Vegas with the newly married Ross Kemp/Rebekah Wade and all their hangers-on. Low-life scum doesn't come into it - the state of the cabin after the flight defies description. At that time Kemp was playing Grant Mitchell. Now while I'm not a violent man I really did have a strong desire to deck him on the way off.

As for restricting booze on flights, no. I'm with David "52 Stubbies" Boon on that one.

usually have a few in the airport before it sort of a tradition, only time i,ve been pissed off with people who have drunk is an hour into a flight to vegas a stag party started playing up flirting with the air hotesses sort of thing, then one of them smacked her ass and tried lifting her skirt up, this resulted in a ban on alcohol for the rest of the flight, when we got to vegas sheriffs came on the plane and got them off, there must of been 15/20 of them ( passengers ), tbh it was expected they were doing shots at the bar before hand, downing pints etc.

The worst experience I've had was in Virgin's Upper Class cabin on a flight back from Vegas with the newly married Ross Kemp/Rebekah Wade and all their hangers-on. Low-life scum doesn't come into it - the state of the cabin after the flight defies description. At that time Kemp was playing Grant Mitchell. Now while I'm not a violent man I really did have a strong desire to deck him on the way off.

As for restricting booze on flights, no. I'm with David "52 Stubbies" Boon on that one.

Was he wearing a black t-shirt?

It was a while back, but do you know, I think he was! He also slide into a black baseball cap with the peak well down when he deplaned: the incognito mode I guess.

I normally have a few before i go on, tradition not a nervous flyer either just like to have a couple and a shot normally whether i go away with mates/ family or the ex.

We had one incident last year, we were on the way back from Punta Cana. EJ flight and they had literally messed up all the seats in front of us. Basically they had double booked flights somehow, family in front would not move because they all wanted to be together Mum/Dad/ daughter( probably 5) so they were trying to split them up and get the dad to move elsewhere. It took over 30 minutes for this mess to sort out and they asked for people to seperate so someone can go on their own. It probably doesn't appear too bad but when we were right behind it and then the family in front would pull the race card at the end.

No excuses for bad behaviour but let's not forget the thousands who go by plane after a few drinks and don't cause problems. My mate is a nervous flyer and can't get on the plane without several whiskies beforehand.

Don't see no problem in that at all, your mate is clearly sensible and can handle his booze!

Thought it a really good watch although so many examples pissed me off due to passenger behaviour - Definitely dont think the two drink limit is unreasonable, especially as they were saying that due to cabin pressure its easier and quicker to get drunk when on an aircraft than it is anywhere else. The other problem though is like one pilot was saying... These people are kicked out of their Ibiza hotels at 10am, dont have a flight back until later that night so have nothing else to do but drink so will be long drunk by the time their flight is ready

Surely there's more to do than drink? If they can't control themselves they shouldn't be allowed on the flight.

I haven't had any issues with alcohol, either with me being too drunk or anyone else bothering me actually.

Although earlier this year I flew to New York and noticed the cabin was full of a particular group of people. I didn't think much of it, it wasn't a group I had seen in person before, I was more intrigued by the uniform clothing and haircuts - particularly those forced on the kids.

I began to suspect it was going to go a bit wrong when I first sat down. Two of them were kicking up a huge fuss about not having three seats to themselves (one for the baby) and they forced an unassuming English guy to sit somewhere else after take off, pretty much blaming him for the issue, before launching a tirade at the cabin crew. The father then proceeded to sit in the seat in front of me, and bounce the baby relentlessly, causing my iPad to fall over a lot. That's a first world problem I accept, but still a borderline crime in my book.

Oh well, he doesn't mean any harm I thought. Then I noticed... it wasn't just him being a bit obnoxious... it was the entire front portion of the plane. There were half a dozen Englishmen, and 100 members of this group. And it became carnage. Kids running up and down, climbing on seats, climbing on me, throwing things at each other... The parents were ignoring them while holding surprisingly loud meetings in the aisle, demanding (rudely) all kinds of things from the cabin crew, who elected to hide for long stints of the flight.

I've never seen a cabin crew disappear before, but these guys knew what was up. As I got off the plan I commented "That might be the worst flying experience of my life" and one of them responded "we were saying exactly the same thing!" which was of minimal comfort after eight hours of irritation.

I'm not proud of this......but quite a few years back I was on the way back from NY with a couple of mates.

There was a kid of about 6-8 years old who kept banging the back of my seat. This went on intermittently for about an hour when I turned round and asked his old man if he could get him to stop. The dad pretty much did nothing until I told the kid to stop....at which point the dad got a bit shirty.

It all calmed down and then about an hour before landing it started again and I decided to ignore it as best I could.

As we got up to depart they both smirked at me and pushed past me to get off.....leaving the kids Sony PSP on the seat.

I'm not proud of this......but quite a few years back I was on the way back from NY with a couple of mates.

There was a kid of about 6-8 years old who kept banging the back of my seat. This went on intermittently for about an hour when I turned round and asked his old man if he could get him to stop. The dad pretty much did nothing until I told the kid to stop....at which point the dad got a bit shirty.

It all calmed down and then about an hour before landing it started again and I decided to ignore it as best I could.

As we got up to depart they both smirked at me and pushed past me to get off.....leaving the kids Sony PSP on the seat.

I questioned my morality for about 2 seconds before I nicked it.

That'll learn 'em.....couple of wankers!

You should have got your mate who was sitting in front of the Dad to recline his seat as far as it would go.

I'm not proud of this......but quite a few years back I was on the way back from NY with a couple of mates.

There was a kid of about 6-8 years old who kept banging the back of my seat. This went on intermittently for about an hour when I turned round and asked his old man if he could get him to stop. The dad pretty much did nothing until I told the kid to stop....at which point the dad got a bit shirty.

It all calmed down and then about an hour before landing it started again and I decided to ignore it as best I could.

As we got up to depart they both smirked at me and pushed past me to get off.....leaving the kids Sony PSP on the seat.

I like having a few drinks before I fly long haul, as after a couple of wee's I'll usually manage to sleep on the flight. Nearly backfired on me once though in Toronto, as I stayed drinking in the city centre for too long and was pushing it to make my flight. Taxi just managed to get through the traffic and get me there with enough time to kill, but my trousers then fell down as I ran into the terminal. I do my drinking in the airport now.

Watched the Panorama one. Told my assistant about it next day, as she was previously 17 years as purser on Czech Airlines. She said that in her experience it was a uniquely British thing. So I guess its all part of the big increase in big drinking in the years I have been away. The Panorama prg pointed the finger at the airports. Must admit I had never noticed they sell huge quantities of minatures. They showed outlets sellling alcohol there which never do land-side, such as Starbucks and Burger King.

Would be a shame if they banned onboard though. As @Valiantphil said, helps a lot of nervous passengers. Frankly I am one, if it gets bumpy, although I can't remember the last time I had a seriously bumpy flight. Maybe I was too pissed to notice. :-)

Years back took a Dan Air charter to Malaga. One mate was seriously nervous. The stewardesses, whom we were trying to chat up, were great. Let him, and the rest of us go up to the flight deck. And while we were there, it worked. He calmed down and was fascinated by it. (me I was gobsmacked by how tiny it was). But as soon as he sat down he was off again. So they let him open his litre of bourbon. Good old days...

My worst actual flight wasn't booze related. The ancient DC-10 charter hit some turbulence just before landing and came down nose-wheel first. You could tell by the ashen-faced crew members that this was not a good plan but the plane just seemed to shake it off.

The funniest experience was an Air Seychelles Trislander which was scheduled to take us to one of the outer islands. Now just by way of background a Trislander is an Islander but with an extra engine built into the tail. This extra weight makes it a touch marginal balance-wise. I pointed out to Mrs cafcfan that I could see our bags being loaded into a small compartment at the back and that the pilot was doing pre-flight checks - we'd be off soon. Then she went back to sleep. Our case went into the hold and the plane toppled backwards and a bit of the tailplane fell off when it hit the tarmac. The loader then tried putting the bit back on, hoping that no one had noticed.

I nudged Mrs cafcfan and said the plane's just fallen over. She said stop messing about and went back to sleep.

Meanwhile the pilot, who turned out to be an Aussie, got out of the cockpit - it was so high he had to jump to the ground and started beating the crap out of the hapless luggage handler. He had to be restrained by other ground staff. Our flight was delayed while they found another plane.

The pilot told us that to keep a Trislander balanced you have to wait until the passengers get in before putting stuff in the rear luggage compartment.