Self-Compassion Through the Seasons of Life

Just a few days ago I was blessed to celebrate another birthday — 61 to be exact! Normally I wouldn’t let the world know it was my birthday, but this year I want to, for a purpose.

Birthday girl

Every birthday I celebrate is very significant for me. When I was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis 3 1/2 years ago, my doctor predicted I wouldn’t make it to 59. Praise God I’m still here! I know I wouldn’t be here without His grace, mercy and working behind the scenes to sustain my life.

This is true for you too

Having a terminal illness brings this truth to the forefront for me, but the reality is that this is true for you too! Every breathe we take, and every moment we live is provided by Him.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Therefore, we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

The verses are talking about how our external bodies are wasting away, but we are to not lose heart. Why? Because we are being renewed day by day by our Lord. This perspective gives us a healthy way to balance gratitude for every breathe we have, without losing heart from the troubles we are going through. These troubles are what helps us grow and mature, and we are renewed by God’s ever present love, strength and mercy. It is encouraging for me to know that even though my body is falling apart, my inner self can continue to grow and become more vibrant and healthy!

This includes our inner character; relationship with God and others; and the love, hope and life that reflect God’s presence in our lives. We are to focus and give less value to those things that are temporary such as our possessions, status, outward appearance, and those things that draw us away from God.

Whatever you are going through:

Allow yourself to grieve

Be grateful for every breathe and every moment

Use these trials and devastating moments to draw near to God

Allow Him to love you as you strive to grow emotionally, mentally and spiritually

Focus on what lies ahead…an eternal glory that outweighs what you are going through

Be kind to yourself about your struggles, and your need for support

I hope my reflections on another birthday help you reflect on your life and help you to focus on the gift of life, the grace of God, and His help to get through whatever you are facing.

I’d love to hear from you. We’re in this together.

What is your response to this post? How did it affect you personally? What encourages you, and challenges you?

Please leave a comment below, and share with those who could benefit via e-mail or on social media.

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Kim Fredrickson is an author, blogger and marriage and family therapist. She is the author of “Pulmonary Fibrosis Journey: A Counselor and Fellow Patient Walks with You,” “The Power of Positive Self-Talk” and “Give Your Kids a Break: Parenting with Compassion for You and Your Children.” Kim blogs about self-compassion and faith at kimfredrickson.com, and also writes a patient column at pulmonaryfibrosisnews.com. Kim is honored to help those facing a terminal illness (as she is) and their families be kind to themselves on their final journey.

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12 thoughts on “Reflecting on Another Birthday”

So well said Kim. You are an encourager and blessing to us all. Happy birthday indeed. May you experience many more birthdays and allow the doctors to see that there is Someone greater than themselves.

Good morning, and a very happy belated birthday! You are living proof of how we as believers can hear the projected life span that we will have from professionals, but then remember that we need to put our trust into the hands of God who knows the exact number of our days. My prayer is for many more years for you to teach, inspire and be a witness to what abiding faith looks like, even in the midst of great challenges.
Prayers continue for the next appointment and onward!
Hold fast and shine on!
You are loved, you know!

Love the balance of truth: “We are to focus and give less value to those things that are temporary such as our possessions, status, outward appearance, and those things that draw us away from God,” with grace: “Allow yourself to grieve, Be grateful for every breathe and every moment, Use these trials and devastating moments to draw near to God, Allow Him to love you as you strive to grow emotionally, mentally and spiritually, Focus on what lies ahead…an eternal glory that outweighs what you are going through, Be kind to yourself about your struggles, and your need for support.” I needed both:)

Happy birthday Kim! You and I are only 4 months apart in age 🙂
The verse from 2 Cor. 4 is one of my favorites as well. When I lost a husband to a motor vehicle accident back in 2004, that verse was a mainstay for my heart – looking forward more and more to eternity and being reunited with those we love, even though life here on earth is hard and often painful.
Lung transplant! I’m praying it’s the miracle for you that you need!
Blessings Kim!
Nancy

Hi Kim,
Happy week-after-your birthday!
I appreciate your encouraging words and reminder from God to focus on what lasts. Also, that as long as we have breath, we can continue to grow and find meaning and purpose. My word right now is “steadfast.” Thanks for modeling this as you refuse to give up and continuously look for new ways to connect and serve. I want to make each day count too! I look forward to hearing how God continues to bless you in your 61st year.

Such truth you have spoken. As one who lives with chronic illness I found this to be a wonderful reminder that God numbers my days and every day is a gift from him. Thank you for your ministry of encouragement and inspiration.