I hunger.

Well, I took my first final today. Tomorrow I take my last. For the year anyway.

I got registered for like one class in the fall, and can’t find any summer classes that don’t suck. I’m hoping to get into another fall one, but first I need to get coms 100 credit for the “Forms of Oral Communication” class I took at RC.

Fascinating, huh?

ON another note, I’m doubting my choices again. I’m enjoying the idea of PR as a career, or journalism for that matter, but I’m looking to find a more specific field than just “PR” or “Reporting”.

So far, the people I’ve had to work with have been okay -but they are unscrupulous at times and lack personal responsibility or integrity. These are traits that I put a lot of importance on and it bothers me to think that I may suffer for that.

I want to do something fulfilling and not be the black sheep or the oddball for putting value on honestly or integrity. It seems that PR is a mixed bag. Yes, people often see it as being the “dark side of journalism” but journalism itself is no sunny day. In any case, working for a firm or corporation involves a lot of risk for me personally, because I would NOT be fulfilled if I made enough money to live comfortable but had to compromise my own integrity to do so.

I’d love to work in entertainment, or write for a magazine of publication OTHER than strictly news-based ones. Magazine publishing/writing would be freakin’ awesome. The only problem there is, so far a lot of the articles I read by and about magazine writers seem to imply that one also needs a day job because it doesn’t really pay. There is also the small difficulty of finding time to write anything at all.

In order to break into writing, one must write.

It’s fine and dandy to imagine yourself writing a book or screenplay and emerging from obscurity, riding out the media storm on a wave of accolades for your talent and spending the rest of your life safe in the realm of well-known and therefore consistently sought out authorship.

It’s a one-in-a-million possibility though, and it’s a helluva lot of work.

I’d have to have time to write everyday -time I could spend alone and unmolested. Free of work, classes, and toddlers who need attention from the one loving parent they still have.

I’d have to produce a lot of shit, and mail off a lot of shit, in the hopes that amongst it there would occasionally be an acceptance letter from a publication in the mail.

ON top of all of this, I’d have to find a way to survive while I waited for my hard work to pay off -if ever.

Life’s a bitch. I find time to write here… but unless this journal starts turning into something someone might actually read, I’d better find some kind of direction to write in or I’ll write myself into the crazy-farm.