A blog about a Zany Writer living with Borderline Personality Disorder

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Ten Day YOU Challenge – #4 – Seven Wants

Just a quick update, then onto the list. One of my housemates is bonkers, he’s out the front right now ranting and raving to himself. I’m genuinely scared of him now. It’s funny the things that don’t seem so important when you’re off your face. But now in my life without inebriation, that I find my comfort levels are dropping everyday. I have to sneak about just to feel comfortable even having a cigarette. Apparently the landlord is kicking him out soon, but it can’t happen soon enough. I hate feeling like a prisoner in my room.

Well enough of that annoying depresso crap, on to my next list. Seven Wants. I haven’t really thought about this too much, so it should prove interesting. Here Goes!

Contentment. It’s something I’ve always wanted but could never have. Perhaps I’m just not wired that way. I used to want happiness more than anything, but in all honesty, I’d be happy just to feel content for a change. Happiness is too much of an extreme. It’s usually either happy for sad with me, so being content is a nice place somewhere in the middle.

A life filled with passion and creativity. I think that’s why so many relationships, whether they be plutonic or romantic, I go batshit crazy if I feel my creativity being stifled by being around the wrong people. I refuse to sell myself short for anyone or anything. I’ll only be wasting my time and your time too if I did it any other way.

To write an episode of Doctor Who. It’s always been an ambition of mine, and I think I could almost say my life would be complete. It would be the most amazing thing to be able to write for my favorite show. I’m geeking out just thinking about it. A boy can dream, and dreams are what keep my moving forward.

A simple life. I don’t need to explain more. Something simple that’s exclusively mine. It’s the only thing I want more than anything else really.

To feel like I’ve made some sort of difference. To someone, even if it’s only one person, I will have all been worth it. Fingers crossed.

Perhaps have a family of my own someday. I’m not entirely sold on this idea, but I cannot deny that the idea of it is quite tempting. The reality of the situation is different of course. I would like to be able to share my life with someone special and see where it goes from there.

To be able to look back at everything I’ve done and feel a sense of pride. I am frightened that all this will amount to nothing at the end of the day, but I’m pretty sure there’s some reason for it, even if I can’t fathom it right now. I want to leave my mark on the world, and be missed when I’m gone. It sounds morbid kinda, but it’s how I feel.