Re: what physical feature & personality trait do you hate most about yourself?

Hairline (Uneven and weird lol)

Trait: Jealousy. It's probably the strongest emotion I have. And it is very ****ing dominant and it leads to terrible thoughts that can't be acted out in a non-violent society. I'd like to think that my desire to succeed or my love for family/friends exceeds it, but many times it hasn't been the case. It's very upsetting.

I don't get angry. I'm not weak. I'm not particularly afraid of anything. But push the jealousy buttons and bam.

I'm not talking about the kind of jealousy girls have. I have nothing but respect for those who are better off/more handome etc.

I'm talking about the disgusting gut-wrenching green-eyed will to kill when your personal ideas have been taken and passed off as someone else's. I'm talking about the feeling you get when you raise your younger siblings and put enormous effort and sacrifice into their well-being and they value the opinions of the media/their friends over you. I'm talking about the kind of pain you get when you're a superstar (and then become a has-been) and you run sh!t in highschool and college, and some half-azzed twerp surmounts the throne and receives all the adulation and praise from the audience. Talking about real betrayal.

Got to learn to let go.

Jealousy is linked to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and the fear of loss/abandon. And I've lost many things in my life/been betrayed, and yes certain things have to be perfect and routine.

Second would be narcissism. It's probably a defense mechanism. There are way too many "I's" and "me's" and personal anecdotes when arguing. It's a damn shame. Working on the debating skills, and it is imperative to use a combination of facts and facts ONLY to tackle an issue. Also I use the "let's agree to disagree" type thing to deny reality. Got to stop that sh!T ASAP. The truth should prevail over lies.

By the way...

Homosexuality is linked to paranoia.
Vanity is linked to being effeminate.
Arrogance is linked to insecurity.
Self-depreciation/excessive putting down is linked to having too much self-love concern for yourself.
Anxiety is linked to being treated too harshly as a kid/low test levels.

And then there are a bunch of personality disorders.
Schizo (People with too much dopamine in their system)
Histrionic (Attention-seeking) usually experienced by middle/elder children and women.
Lazy ADHD (Think eeyore) Consummate wankers.