Friday, June 24, 2005

The Question: How should the White House respond to incredibly stupid accusations at press conferences?

The Solution: Is quite elegant in its simplicity. The first step is to redecorate the press room. Install electric chairs. Make sure they are comfortable! The next step is to strap everyone from the press into a chair. From this point on the press conference can proceed normally. Honest, even challenging questions can be asked and answered. However; the moment some moonbat equates eating Orange Glazed Chicken to Death camps; ZZZZZOT! When the smoke clears, allow the moonbat (if able) to rephrase their question. If they stick to their original lunacy, apply another jolt. Continue until the offender learns how to ask proper questions or has to be removed with a Dust Buster. This has the double effect of training the press corps in the proper ways to address issues facing our nation and weeding out those whose only agenda is to tear down Bush and the administration.

With minor modifications I think this system can be applied to Congress. Make the speaker stand on a grid. Whenever he or she;

Makes a treasonous remark

Spouts some groundless accusation against the President, or the administration

Calls for some money-wasting, time-wasting investigation into a non-issue

I am going to Origins next week and I can't wait. It's an intimate affair with me and 15,000 of my closest friends. I will be arriving in Columbus on Wednesday and will post throughout the entire event (The Hampton Inn and Suites has free Hi-Speed internet access in each room!) The first Origins took place in 1975. I have been attending Origins off and on since 1989. They began holding it in a different host city every year but it found a permanent home in Columbus in 1996.

My Saturday Night tradition at Origins is going to the Japanese Steak House for dinner and then attending The Smithee Awards Show afterwards. It don't get better than this!

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

You won't find that category at the Oscars but there is an wards show that does honor the best of the worst movies ever made. I am talking about the Smithee Awards. It has all the pageantry of the Academy awards with the added bonuses of no acceptance speeches and the films actually are ones you may have seen. I know, I have attended the Smithee awards now for more than a decade. That includes a MegaMetaSmithee awards show too! But more on that later. Let's start with What are the Smithee Awards. From their FAQ:

The Smithee Awards, or "Smithees," is an annual ceremony which celebrates Bad Cinema. In principle, it's sort of the Anti-Oscars, though in practice it's more like the Anti-People's-Choice-Awards. A number of films are so "honored" each year, and there are nineteen categories in which a movie might win.

Some distinguishing characteristics to help you get the flavor of things: We limit ourselves to titles available on home video, and year-of-release is irrelevant. We clip the films for you; this means you're not forced to watch the whole movie, only the best bits. There are five clips per category, during which we tend to withhold comment and allow the film to speak for itself (though an occasional gut-reaction may slip out). Oh, and the voting audience, not we, are the final arbiters as to who takes the prize (so there can be no possibility of anything being rigged).

Not many people actually get a statuette, since thus far only two have claimed their Smithee. Can't imagine why.

The two in question were Walter Koenig of Star Trek/Babylon 5 fame and Jeff Conaway of Taxi/Babylon 5 fame. When I said there were no acceptance speeches at the Smithees, I was being honest. Conaway however was a good sport and agreed to be a "Guest of Honor" and talked to the audience. Koenig took the trophy and bailed as fast as he could. Here is why they were honored; from an email from Host/Fearless Leader: Bryan Cassidy (a.k.a. Allen Smithee):

Glad you enjoy the Smithees. Jeff received his award in the “WHAT?!” category for his work in the film A Time To Die, starring Traci Lords. His speech about the giant turd was actually in reference to a gag gift he and his fellow cast members once gave to a hard-drinking director of theirs. The Smithee Award statuettes themselves are actually deceptively handsome: A golden trashcan on a square base, with a strip of film wound around it emblazoned with the word “Smithee Award.”

Walter got his award for Moontrap, yes, in the Worst Cover Copy category, though he was nominated for Worst Acting, too (we didn’t tell him that part, since he was reluctant to accept even the WCC award).

To date, no other actor has graced us with their presence at a Smithee Awards ceremony with the sole exception of Kenny Baker, who entered with his wife, took one look around, and walked right out. We’re so proud.

So where are these awards held that such luminaries as Koenig, Conaway and Baker just stroll in and out? And Why is it called the Smithees? Well to answer the second question first I return to the FAQ:

Where did you get such a weird name?The name "Allen Smithee" (various spellings) has been the film-industry standard pseudonym used in the credits for any director who wishes to have his name disassociated from a movie. This is done usually because the film has either strayed too much from the director's original vision, or because he suddenly realizes that his vision just plain stinks. In 1992, when Bryan Cassidy, with the help of Greg Pearson, came up with the idea for an awards ceremony glorifying Bad Movies, "The Smithee Awards" seemed truly appropriate.

Recent developments in Hollywood have spread the rumor that since the name "Allen Smithee" has become too well-known, it will be retired. Nonsense! Even if the name itself becomes less widely used, Mr. Smithee will simply assume a new one -- the spirit which Allen Smithee stands for will never die! Wherever a ghost writer pens a mediocre memoir, he'll be there. Wherever a comedian forgets a punchline, he'll be there. After the apocalypse, when the last light bulb in the last camera has burnt out and we have all reverted to cavepeople, he'll be there whenever someone smudges the yak blood on the painting they were doing... Actually, I forgot exactly where I was going with this, but you get the idea.

Now where do the awards take place? Columbus Ohio. The Smithee Awards are part of the Origins International Game Expo, this year held June 29 - July 3. The awards are held Saturday Night at 7:00pm. And for the past few years it has been standing room only. The Game Expo which is hosted by GAMA (Game Manufacturers Association) has had many Sci-fi and Fantasy film stars as Special Guests over the years.

I always make it a point to attend the Smithees. It has been a blast each time and it gets better every year. There are 19 categories and 5 nominees in each category. The audience votes and the winners announced. The rest as they say is history.The categories are

Now as if this weren't enough, every six years, the winners of the previous five years in each category are pitted against each other in the MegaMetaSmithee Awards. There have been two so far. The Smithees have been around since 1992. You can find a list of all the winners at their web site.

And of course I always have a complaint about something. The Smithees are generally family friendly. Occasionally a clip will have bad language but Bryan is always careful to announce it before hand. That leaves the one category, "Let's up the Rating to "R". It is for that gratuitous nude scene which has no other purpose in the film except to get an R rating. Personally I could do without the entire category but it is part of what makes bad movies bad. Like I said Bryan does give plenty of warning and gives parents time to get the kids out of the room.

Other than that I thoroughly enjoy the Smithee awards. I make it a habit to attend every year. I tell everyone I know about it and now I've told you! If you are in Columbus for the 4th of July Weekend, stop in!

Saturday, June 18, 2005

You are an F-15. Your record in combat is spotless; you've never been defeated. You possess good looks, but are not flashy about it. You prefer to let your reputation do the talking. You are fast, agile, and loud, but reaching the end of your stardom.

Moe likes quizzes and I like military aircraft. I was hoping to be a bomber, you know the "Nuke 'em 'till they glow then shoot them in the dark" type. But I was pleasantly surprised to find I'm an F-15. I am pretty much all the things listed but it saddens me that I am reaching the end of my stardom. Stupid obsolescence.

moehawk has quit smoking and is detailing his ordeal on his blog. I feel for you brother. I quit ten years ago cold turkey and I still get an occaisional urge.

My Pastor has really been preaching against smoking lately. That combined with moehawk's quitting made me think about what I could do to help. So I offer this as encouragement to moehawk to keep up the good effort and do not look back. This is a cancerous lung. It's owner was a smoker and it literally killed him. Keep that in mind when you want to reach for that little white coffin nail.

Ex-smokers are often tempted when watching others smoke. Spending time with a specific friend and watching them smoke may be a trigger especially if it was the most time you had spend with the friend since you quit smoking. The first time you have any new experiences, even if smoking is not part of the ritual, the thought for a cigarette will seem like a natural part of the ritual.

Another factor is when watching a person smoke, the natural tendency is for the ex-smoker to start to fantasize about how good a cigarette will be at that given moment. A more productive way to handle the situation though is to really watch the person smoke one, and then wait a few minutes as they light another and then another. Soon you will see that they are smoking in a way that you don't want to and probably in a way that they don’t want to either. But they have no choice. You do.

So hang in there moehawk buddy. Don't let a little white piece of weed filled paper control your life. And the same to all others who are trying to quit.

Armies of attorneys were gathered last November to challenge any state's election they could, even vaguely, label as illegitimate.

Democrats have stonewalled President Bush's judicial nominees, U.N. muscleman nominee, and his person appointee as White House chef.

I predict that this will continue. The Liberal-Progressive Democratic Party has declared its own jihad.

ANd lets not forget the Hillarybeast's desire to allow ex-felons to vote and her comments about repealing tax cuts "for the greater common good". Yes the liberals have a win at all costs mentality and there is nothing they won't sacrifice to achieve power.

It is a little embarrassing. Micheal Collins has an excellant piece called Scorn over "Buckeye Boo-Hoo" mystifies experts. He tries to explain why people are so hard on George Voinavich for crying at the prospect of John Bolton becoming ambassador to the U.N. Crying for politicians is not unusual.

“We don’t universally make fun of politicians when they cry – that’s the interesting thing,” said Randolph Cornelius, a Vassar College professor and researcher who has studied human emotions, and weeping in particular.

In some cases, in fact, letting the tears flow can enhance a politician’s image. Think Rudolph Giuliani and 9/11. Giuliani’s emotional, misty-eyed public appearances in the days after the terrorist attacks softened his brusque image as New York mayor and helped him build needed political capital, Cornelius said.

But George got all weepy over John Bolton.

Voinovich’s tears, however, seem to have diminished him in the eyes of some.

Supporters – and the senator himself – say he got all choked up while speaking out against John Bolton’s nomination as the U.S. ambassador to the United Nations because he feared for the country’s future if a perceived bully such as Bolton becomes a top diplomat.

His detractors have been far less charitable, suggesting that the senator has come unglued.

“Voinovich’s weeping is a little odd,” John Pitney, a government professor at Claremont McKenna College in California, said in an e-mail interview. “If he cried every time he thought of a brusque federal official, Lake Erie couldn’t hold all the tears.”

I'm in the "unglued" camp. And I have no one to blame except myself. I voted for him. Sheesh.

I found a brief description of Candice Jackson's book titled "Their Lives, The Women Targeted by the Clinton Machine" at Mover Mikes. The reason I mention this is because The Museum of Left Wing Lunacy has a piece that says "Google Censors Ads for Anti-Clinton Book" It seems of late that liberal bias is becoming more blatant. I think the 2004 elections were the wake up call to the liberal machine. They know how the majority of Americans feel about the left's ideology and are no longer willing to be subtle about implementing the liberal agenda. We need to call Google on tis and rub their noses in it. Google Ads don't block anti-bush material so make them drop the double standard.

I found this article and it really made me mad. Bodies of Four Infants Found in Austria details the actions of a woman who murdered her four babies over the course of at least three years. Her reason, she was afraid that she couldn't care for the children AND she was afraid that a child would drive away her male companion of eight years. The autopsy wasn't complete but initial evidence suggests all the babies were born alive and then killed. Deep thinkers in the psychobabble community had these comments;

"Various reasons can lead women into such violent situations that they can't even think straight," said Dr. Roswith Roth of the University of Graz's Institute of Psychology.

"When a mother kills a child right after its birth, it's clear that she does so because she sees no other way out," Roth told the Austria Press Agency. "There is still an enormous amount of ignorance in how to prevent such things."..snip"The climate in which a woman must deal with an unplanned pregnancy is not very supportive in Austria," said Sylvia Groth, who heads a women's health center in Graz.

So I guess society is to blame. If only Austria culture was more supportive of women who suddenly find themselves a victim of an unplanned pregnancy! After all the woman in question had no hand it their own situation. Bull.This nut case performed an abortion on her unwanted pregnancies after the children were born. We call it murder. The Austria police are treating it as such but the liberals are blaming society and making it out as if this woman just didn't get to the clinic in time to have it done in an acceptable time frame. The sad thing is she didn't have to kill them at all.

Although the province of Styria where Graz is regional capital has had a program in place since 2001 allowing women who don't want to keep their babies to give birth anonymously, women's advocates called for greater attention to their plight.

She didn't want to raise them and she didn't want to lose her man. The man by the way, claims he never knew anything about the pregnancies or the murders. Makes you wonder just how close they really are. And it makes you wonder if he will wait for her to get out of prison.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

I have a few days off from work coming up and I want to get some much needed home repairs done. I thought it would be a good time also to catch up on my blogging and to get to the several draft posts sitting around in Blogger. So if you see a sudden explosion of posts from me you know why.

Monday, June 13, 2005

So Jacko bet the rap. I'm not surprised. Disappointed but not surprised. I am going to miss all the Headline Fodder this ordeal has provided. Personally I believe that the man is a child molester and he should be punished but apparently the jury says he didn't commit the crimes laid out in charges that we brought against him. There were lots of tears according to the AP story:

motionless Jackson dabbed at his eyes with a tissue as the verdicts were read, and he later was embraced by his chief lawyer, Thomas Mesereau Jr. Another member of his defense team burst into tears, and some of the women in the jury also wept and passed around a box of tissues.

Yeah I bet there were some other tears too. Tears we could not see shed by the victims who didn't come forward. But they didn't press charges and Jacko wasn't tried for molesting them. He faced one victim and his family. And because the jury didn't like the way the mother behaved:

"I disliked it intensely when she snapped her fingers at us," said one juror, a woman. She said she thought to herself, "Don't snap your fingers at me, lady." The jurors were not identified.

Proof positive that Jackson did not molest the woman's son.

Another juror said in a CNN interview that testimony about Jackson sleeping with boys made him believe Jackson probably was a molester, but it wasn't proven in this case.

"I feel that Michael Jackson probably has molested boys," Raymond Hultman said. "I cannot believe that ... this man could sleep in the same bedroom for 365 straight days and not do something more than just watch television and eat popcorn. I mean, that doesn't make sense to me. But that doesn't make him guilty of the charges that were presented in this case and that's where we had to make our decision."

So did the prosecution fail? Was the defense that good? Was the case that weak or was Jacko actually innocent in this one case?

The acquittals marked a stinging defeat for Santa Barbara County District Attorney Tom Sneddon, who displayed open hostility for Jackson and had pursued him for more than a decade, trying to prove the rumors that swirled around Jackson about his fondness for children.

Sneddon sat with his head in his hands after the verdicts were read.

"We don't select victims of crimes and we don't select the family. We try to make a conscientious decision and go forward," Sneddon said afterward, adding "I'm not going to look back and apologize for anything that we've done."

AP is hinting that Sneddon had it in for Jackson and has been trying to get him for 10 years like it's a bad thing Is there a statute of limitation for perversion? Is there a point when you can, with good conscience say, "Well we really can't nail Jacko for molesting kids and it's been 10 years so let's just drop it. He's earned it." To do so would be saying we really don't value the safety of our children. It really is too much work to maintain a vigil against perverts.

I think we have had enough of Michael Jackson. I think that if any parent allows their boys to "sleep over" with Michael they should just sign a waiver and say "Here, take my son and have your way with him." What else could they possibly think would go on? What person in their right mind could leave their child with even an alleged pervert?

They say the third time's the charm. Well Jacko's charmed life should end if there is a third time. When are we going to stop glorifying the deviants in our society?

Friday, June 10, 2005

When I learned that Evil Glenn defiled Qurans on a regular basis I had to find out what it was that he did. I employed an inside agent, Deep Pup. So as not to arouse suspicion, Deep Pup smuggled the news out in verse. Double Dactyls to be precise. Here is Deep Pup's report;

Mr. Minority has nothing nice to say about Mr. Carter. Talk About an Embarrassment!! is very representitive of the conservative feeling about Carter's "Close Gitmo" comments. Jimmy's 444 day ordeal must have given him some keen insight into dealing with islamofacist terrorism.

For this Precision Guided Humor assignment I am looking at 2006 through fantasy headlines. I was amazed at how much easier it was to make fun of real headlines compared to making them up.I think I will start off in the entertainament world. Jacko is still newsworthy after being sentenced to 10 years for child molestation. We have this headline;Michael Jackson Exchanges Vows with Cell Mate

Paris Hilton's on again on again love affair with her name surfaces in the headlines with;Paris Hilton Engaged to Musician Paris Pliakas

And the Republican majority passed good law;Last Actor Vowing to Leave the US After Bush '04 Win Exiled Todayso long Mr. Baldwin

On the political front Ted tries to get help but old habits die hard;Kennedy Expelled from Betty Ford; Ted, Gurney and Nurse Wind Up in Pool

Washington state paves the way for a bigger Democratic turnout;Washington State Okays Extraterrestrial Vote

John Kerry's attempt to portray himself as a war heroes grows more desparate;John Kerry recalls Christmas Eve in Cambodia; "I Rescued Jedi Younglings from the Sith"

and congress has some new rules;Congressional Witch Ban Forces Boxer, Clinton, and Pelosi Off Capitol HillAnd That's next year in review.

Those of us old enough to have been kids in the pre-PC America remember playing cowboys and indians. The object if you were a cowboy and ths a good guy was to kill the indians who were the bad guys. Well MEMRI has a news clip MEMRI TV: "700 - The Death Games of Gaza Children" It shows the Gaza children playing :Arabs and Jews (video link)" The objective here is to shoot Jews and die for Allah. The transcript reads :

Reporter: Abd Al-Sattar's favorite game is "Jews and Arabs."Boy: The Arabs are in the street. The Jews stand over there and we shoot at them, and throw rocks and grenades at them.Reporter: To win the game, the player must die.Boy: Burn the tank!Boy: Martyrdom for the sake of Allah is our greatest desire. Oh God! Don't be afraid because fear hurts me. Don't be sad because sadness frightens me. Don't scream because screams kills me."Injured" boy: Shoot at them. Shoot at them!Boy: We are all dead, mother, but don't be sad. Mother, rejoice! Rejoice that I died a martyr's death for the sake of Allah.Reporter: Do you like the Jews, Aya? Look at her. Do you like the Jews?Aya: No.Reporter: Why?Aya: They are sons of dogs.Mother: Sons of dogs.Reporter: Have you ever seen any Jews?Aya: Yes, I have.Reporter: Where?Aya: On TV.Reporter: On TV?Aya: They wear helmets like yours. Like this. They put it on like this. They wear ones like these… They hold the Kalashnikov. They come in a tank, and shoot.

Is there any wonder thre is no peace in the middle East? Hat Tip to Stefania at Free Thoughts

Republicans are "a pretty monolithic party. They all behave the same. They all look the same. It's pretty much a white Christian party.

I had no idea that my party was so shallow and stood for so little. Why if they only want white Christians then I have no choice but to leave the party. Howie went on to say

"The Republicans are not very friendly to different kinds of people," Dean said Monday, responding to a question about diversity during a forum with minority leaders and journalists. "We're more welcoming to different folks, because that's the type of people we are. But that's not enough. We do have to deliver on things: jobs and housing and business opportunities."

Yeah That's the party for me. Diversity. The more Howie speaks "diverse" it gets. But the Democrats want to just give me a job and housing and business oppurtnities. And if he can deliver it and make all those white Christians pay for it even sweeter!Oh wait. I have a good job after seeking higher education. I own my own home. And I have had business oppurtunities. Hmmm... I think maybe Howie is missing the mark yet again. The Republicans are full of diversity and they didn't ply me with entitlements paid for by hard working Americans. They appealed to my values. The values that we have in common. But Howie hasn't a clue about me or most of the people who call themselves Republicans. He goes on to comment about his "never made an honest living in their lives," quote about the GOP;

"This is one of those flaps that comes up once in awhile when I get tough," Dean said. "We have to be rough on the Republicans. Republicans don't represent ordinary Americans and they don't have any understanding of what it is to go out and try and make ends meet."

So says the chairman of the party of such down-to-earth working class stiffs like John "I married into wealth twice" Kerry, and Ted "My family is rich from booze and porn" Kennedy, John "I sleazed millions in lawsuits" Edwards, and Hilary "I'm plagued with money scandals" Clinton. The Democratic leadership is a very telling reflection of their true beliefs. And while I may not be white, I have never felt excluded by the Republican party or the leadership. Leadership I was proud to support and vote for.

Update: leave it to Chris Muir to come up with the timely jab at Howlin' Howie.Day by Day 6-9-05

Correcting the gender? "Son of God", "Son of Man", "God the Father", "God the Son", they all are very gender specific. What needed to be corrected?

"This long-awaited revised text of the Gospels makes the moral message of Christ more accessible to many, and more illuminating to all," says Billie Shakespeare, vice president for the publisher, in a statement. "It is empowering. We published this new Bible to acknowledge the rise of women in society."

(emphasis mine)Okay first off this clown's name is Billie Shakespeare!? You have got to be kidding me. Secondly how does changing God into a chick make the moral message more accessible and more illuminating? Are there really people out there who were really needing this?

Feminazi:"You know I really want to believe the Christian doctrine of forgiveness but I can't"Femizon Friend:” Why not?"Feminazi:"Well it's that whole 'God is a male thing. It really ruins the message for me."Femizon Friend:” Well you're in luck! Here's the new Judith Christ of Nazareth!"Feminazi:"Oh Praise the Lady! Now I am saved. I can be a better human being now that I can read about God the Mother and God the Daughter!"

Do you think there are people out there like that? Hardly. If they aren't Christian now they certainly won't become Christian believing in a female savior. Thirdly who is empowered by this? A woman who aspires to be a god. And that is not as grandiose a thing as it sounds. To be a god you need only determine for yourself what is right and what is wrong. Then there is the statement that this new bible acknowledges the rise of women in society. How does it do that? By telling a huge lie? They want you to believe that women have gone from the kitchen to creating the cosmos, well you really have come a long way baby.

The foreword says, "Events in the Gospel that do not relate to the moral teachings of Christ are often omitted. However, the basic narrative of Christ's life, death and resurrection is maintained."

Except for the fact that Jesus was a man. That was changed to protect and promote the sinful lifestyles of the fringe element that hates men for being, well men. Face it a real woman knows that Christ died for her. A real woman isn't empowered by the fantasy that Christ could be a woman. A real woman accepts the Saviour in Truth. Lastly the article list some of the comments from reviewers at Amazon.com:

Reader reviews on the book's Amazon.com page included these: • "One star because there is nothing lower. May the Lord have mercy on the writers!" • Reading the other reviews here, I can't believe that this is being touted as being an advance for women's rights. That is just not true. God sent his only SON, not his daughter. It is also true that God loves all of us, male and female the same. He created each of us as we are. We should not strive to become something we are not. This book truly offends me. I agree with the other reviewer, those that produced this book will be held responsible for those they deceive. I pray for each of them. • May the Lord God punish the author of this translation and its publishers if they do not withdraw this herectic bible from print Amen.• "A friend with a Hebrew doctorate noted to me: 'There is no feminine form of the name Jesus (or Joshua). Judith is the feminine form of the name Juda - or Judas.' How perfectly fitting!"

Fitting indeed. Just so you know that these biblical gender benders aren’t going to get off the hook spiritually; look at Galatians chapter 1 verses 8 and 9:

But though we, or an angel from heaven, preach any other gospel unto you than that which we have preached unto you, let him be accursedAs we said before, so say I now again, If any man preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be accursed.

Accursed here is the word anathema which literally means “Let them go to Hell”. Amen to that

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Well according to a Battle Cry Generator that is Dane Bramage's battle cry. I found it at The Pulpit Pounder.

I tried different combinations of my real name and initials and came up with some interesting battle cries:

"I'm going to spank you like a rabid gangsta bitch, then bake cookies!!!""I'm going to clobber you into the stuff of nightmares, and add a notch to my bedpost!""Hail the blood-letting! I lay waste to the landscape like a mad dog who can only get madder!""Ares, God of War, be praised! I pillage until my glands are satisfied!!!""I'm going to cram objects into you from every conceivable angle!!!"

If you are like me, meaning you stand erect and are capable of intelligent thought, then you have heard of the ACLU. If you are reading this on my blog then chances are our opinions of said [sarcasm]august organization[/sarcasm] are probably similar. But rather than launch into full rant mode I will direct you instead to The Capitalist's blog, Laffin at the Left. He has an excellant post No Laffing Matter: The ACLU Attack On Common Sense. He has been to the ACLU website and made some very astute observations on some of their beliefs. He says;

If you browse through the list of issues on their website, the first item is criminal justice. Now, I'm all for criminal justice, but that's about as far as my agreement with the ACLU goes on this point. Their idea of criminal justice involves some sort of race quota in the prison population. Their view is that every race should be represented in prison based on that race's percentage of the population. My view is if a criminal is guilty, then lock him or her up. In short, I'm for a truly blind criminal justice system.

The Capitalist is a great writer and I like his stlye. And it doesn't hurt that we are like-minded individuals. He also talks about www.stoptheaclu.org and their official blog. They have a weekly blogburst and a blogroll. An American Housewife participates in the STACLU blogburst. Check her out (like I've said before) and visit Laffin at the Left (like I've said before) and get out there and STOP THE ACLU.

And as always, more headliney goodness can be found at the usual sources:basil, moehawk, and Moe. ALTHOUGH Moehawk and Moe have been slackin in the headline department. I am calling the kettle black as I have only done headlines once this week. So here's hoping things get better for the guys and they get back into the headline rhythm.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Glenn Reynolds is known for his insatiable thirst for puppy smoothies. While searching through some of his documents for a recipe I made a startling discovery. Glenn is working on a cookbook! I found the partially completed project in his handwriting called “Cooking and Baking with Puppies”.

There was this photo and a recipe for something called Puppy Pie…

Put several heads and feet together with some backs or necks or an entire puppy cut into pieces into a big pot. Fill it with cold water and add about 1 Tbsp each of unrefined sea salt and vinegar. Let it stand for half an hour. Then bring it to boil. Once it starts to boil, immediately turn heat off so much that it is only very slightly simmering. Skim off the stuff that comes up after bringing to boil. After an hour or so you can peal-off" the meat and use some of it for a puppy salad. Yum! The salt and vinegar are needed to help extracting the minerals out of the bones, feet etc. Add the parsley approx. 15 minutes before you want to finish. After it's finished, throw away the bones or what is left from it. You can now use it as a base for a very nutritious and tasty sauce. Any bones and heads can be used, not just puppy, but always add some feet (fox or wolf pup feet will work too) as they will give a good gelatinous texture. Poor into a ready made graham cracker crust and chill.

That isn't nearly as frightening as the "Yorkshire Terrier Pudding" recipe. This is of course, all a Filthy Lie

About Me

My name is Kevin. I am a fundamental conservative Christian Republican of African American ancestry. I work for a soap manufacturer in the IT department. I believe the world has gone absolutely insane and will rapidly get worse. I blame the liberals.