Posted Feb 25, 2015

Now, Gary, we can do this the hard way, or the easy way … or the medium way, or the semi-medium-easy-hard way, or the sorta-hard with a touch of awkward-easy-difficulty-challenging way …

— SpongeBob SquarePants

Living life as a Sugar Baby isn’t usually difficult: Be wined and dined, engage in lively conversation and fun adventures—maybe even go on a trip with your Sugar Daddy. But for Sugar dating to truly live up to its name, sooner or later it will be time to discuss an allowance. Getting this subject addressed and out of the way will help keep the Baby happy and thinking of her generous Daddy even when he’s not there.

Below are six important things to keep in mind when deciding what a Sugar Baby’s allowance should be.

1. Don’t Try To Decide “How Much” Right Away

Remember, arriving at the amount and frequency of a Baby’s allowance is the goal of this conversation, the result of hashing out the “how” and “why” before you get to the “when” and the “how much.” Leave this for the end, after all of the other details have been determined.

2. Figure Out What Kind Of Arrangement You Have

There are as many flavors of Sugar as there are Babies and Daddies to taste them. Some involve an allowance right from the start, which represents the commitment each person will have in the arrangement. An adequate allowance will make it practical for a Sugar Baby to open up her schedule to accommodate when her hard-working Daddy is available. This makes the allowance discussion urgent.

Other arrangements are more tentative about finances at the beginning, meaning that dinners, shows, trips, etc. are enjoyed by both as Daddy picks up the tab and Baby gives him an attractive companion for these dates. It may be that when both parties have decided that they want to move to the next level of Sugar, then it’s time to talk about an allowance. This allows for a more casual conversation about this kind of money issue.

Still other arrangements never involve an allowance at all. Even if both parties agree on this implicitly, it may be a good idea on a first date for one or both of them to state outright that this is not the kind of setup they’re looking for. (Remember: Many Sugar Babies are women in good professions who are looking more for exotic and high-end fun than for an additional income stream.)

3. Weigh Her Needs Vs. His Bankroll

When I say “her needs,” I don’t necessarily mean things like food and shelter (although oftentimes a “kept” Baby is a happy Baby). I mean the small—or large—elements that make a woman feel pampered and cared for. Maybe designer outfits and handbags are what she has her eye on, or a fancy car to drive around and be seen in. Once these needs or wants are met, the question now is: Does she need actual cash to live the Sugar lifestyle she desires? This is where you should start thinking about “how much,” and discuss it openly.

The Baby’s side of the Sugar equation is only one part, of course. The other side is: What kind of resources does the Daddy have to spend on her?

Believe it or not, not every actual or prospective Sugar Daddy is a millionaire. What matters is not the precise net worth of a Daddy, but how much liquidity he has with which to shower his Baby in gifts and money. A truck driver making $75,000 per year but who doesn’t have a family to support or lots of bills to pay may have more to offer his attractive companion than a technical millionaire whose fortune is tied up in an expensive house and paying his children’s college tuition.

Once she has determined what she wants and he has agreed on what he is willing to give, then it is time to negotiate the dollar amount of an allowance the Sugar Baby will receive … if any.

It’s A Marketplace—And That Means Competition

Some measures put the ratio of Sugar Babies to Sugar Daddies at 8 to 1. That’s a lot of demand for Daddies when there is a limited supply. It may be best for Babies to accept what is offered and enjoy that before demanding, or even suggesting, a regular amount of cash. Once both parties are happy and confident, your Sugar arrangement may be ready for this discussion.

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1,649 Responses to “3 Tips For Negotiating An Allowance”

Anonymoussays:

I am new to the site and I am not sure how the money works. How do the SD compensate you? What is a good amount to ask for? I am an African American women. Do men on this site like women like me? Help I need answers.

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I’m new to being a sugar baby. I’ve gone on one date. The sugar daddy flew me out his lifestyle choices were not compatible with mine so I left. I’m talking to a guy I just met and I really like him. He told me he was ready to take care of me. He insists on paying an allowance through a credit card. Is this a common thing to have happen after a few days of conversation? I want a relationship. I don’t even know how I feel about accepting an allowance from someone I just barely know.

Sugar dadysays:

This girl is hot asked for200 bucks first night i gave her 300 necmxt nught she called needs 509 for a car went to bank going to give 509 tonight havent even git a kiss abd im exited to give to her i am hympnotised hard as hell and know i mught get a thank you .

Most men it seems like they don’t understand the definition of”sugar daddy/baby!” They seem to be looking to get laid. They’re too cheap or broke to take on a sugar baby.. cheap scandalous assholes.. it’s a scam..

How do Sugardaddy pay you if you live far away? Also What is the difference between them sending you money WESTERN UNION or bank transfer?

A bank transfer goes directly from their bank account to your bank account. Can be risky for both sides – I personally would never share financial info like that.

A western union is a finance service – someone sends you money, and you go get it. You may be able to go to an actual payout location to get the cash in your hands, or you can set up an account with western union yourself, and do what you want with it. I’d suggest you get the cash if you can.

Google wallet is another option.

While western union and google wallet are less risky than a direct bank transfer, know that both western union & google wallet allow the sender to cancel the transaction before you get the money… so don’t give up the sugar too early =o)

I was wondering about amount of arrangement. I know it is up to what you are comfortable with but just out of curiosity One SD offered 300 to meet six to eight times per year due to our scheduling and such data. I asked him I would need a higher amount He said 500 after meet I did get him to agree on monthly instead of per visit… I feel as though that is also limiting my value in general he wants to be exclusive yet only one time per month does not seem so bad in General yet there is about an hour and a half Drive even cut in half that is still gas time and I would have to find a sitter to me I feel like I should be asking for more but he truly seems like a very nice guy what are your thoughts

CCsays:

An SD just asked me if flat out in his first message to me if I was interested in making 4,000 a month and after I replied basically saying “thats nice, but I’d like to get to know you first before talking about allowance”, he said that he is looking for a friend with benefits.

Is that a normal thing for an SD to say? This is the second time I’ve been offered money for strictly sex TODAY.

emm4says:

It seems to be the norm for me. This site is such a scam, these men want escorts, but aren’t willing to pay for it. Why should escorts make more than sugar babies? Especially those who are in school trying to get a better life?

Another thing is when guys want to provide a high allowance, you have to do weird sex with them, or they control you.

Not sure if any men don’t have agendas these days. I just want a more independent life.

Ilove my sugarbabessays:

Why always girls takes everything in negative way what about sd do any one asked they how they deals to gets perfect sugarbabe in sugar babies site you also find different kind of sugar babe they will go on date with you a normal first date and ask you money for there time and a sd who wants to see this babe in future he pays this sb much more like 300 or 400 $ and from next time he didn’t see this girl and another case a sd does a agreement like you case 4000 $ and he pays in advanced what happen next sometimes he didn’t find this girl she is gone and money is gone

These used to happened with me many times believe me or not and after couple of month i see these girl in my city in cafe with different sd so that why we as a sd decided that at first month we pay them in every visit and its better for both of us if girls want more money they can visit her sd more win win for both of us

Do think negative all the time friends with benefits happens in collage or university its real men’s world my dear we can guide you well for your future

annonymoussays:

I had SB and we agreed up front to a 2k monthly allowance with weekly meetings. I gave bonus gifts, trips, extra cash. We moved it to 3k with same gifts, trips, extra case and shopping with an “exclusive” status in the arrangement. Meaning we dated and had intimacy with no others.
I determined that I was the only one that was holding to exclusive, while she had intimate escourt and call girl one timer events with guys on this as well as other sites. She wanted to move our “exclusive” to 4K and I was considering it while asking what she meant by “exclusive” since she was unaware I knew she was not exclusive with me. Evasive responses lead to my asking about a couple of the men she had seen. After some drama we resumed after we negotiated a figure of 4k to “buy her out of her side business”. Same non exclusive began and more drama. I was told that I could not afford to buy her out as she makes so much with a steady and all the extras on the side. I was emotionally involved and now heart broken. Advice please?

Dont watse your time on someone who wants to play games. Find another SB and tell her what it is that you really want. Let her know if she were to step out on you to let you know.

????says:

Lol waste your time…sorry for the typo but you know what I mean

Mimisays:

My SD lives in Cali, Im from Canada. We have only skyped, and called. He booked me a flight to visit him for 4 days. I want to go, but I also want to have an allowance, cause I am missing work for this travel trip. How do I go about this. What he’s looking for is a best friends with “benefits” Any help would be great. I don’t just a free trip. Thanks guys <3

Hbbbsays:

I’m new to being an SB. I’ve had a guy 18 yrs my senior contact me, really great, upfront with what he is willing to pay as an allowance per month ($6,000 AUD) for the right SB. I said I was free to catch up tomorrow, he asked if I wanted to come to his house (he wants a discreet arrangement) I said I would prefer a public place and he said this was fine and he is happy to meet me at a place of my choosing.
My question is, if he considered me to be the right SB for him, do I ask for the full allowance to start flowing through straight away? Or would you expect that you would get paid a smaller amount for a few follow up dates first to determine your compatibility a bit more before proceeding further in the relationship together ?
As this is our first meet I am not expecting any money, but if he wants a second date would it then be expected that he provides me with some funds ?

Don’t sleep with him. If he’s not willing to give you your allowance before you sleep with him, he’s just going to play you and not give you any money at all

Anonymoussays:

trust me don’t do it

SBAnonsays:

I had a meeting today to discuss with a potential SD to discuss allowance, and he said he would offer me $500/month as a “starting price” for the beginning of our relationship as it doesn’t entail sex and that we can re-negotiate later on when the relationship is solid and moves into having sex

What are your two cents? The approximate monthly allowance rates in the Toronto area are $4k… so the $500 I don’t think is worth it.

The allowance rates in the Toronto area are about 4k, so I’m thinking of skipping out.

The typical allowance rates in the Toronto area is around CAN$1500. Is he offering US$500 or CAN$500? There is a 30% difference: 1US$ ~= 1.3CAN$.

FemaleAnonsays:

Hi everyone!

I have a question. I’m in a NSA sugar relationship where we don’t have sex with others. He gives me a monthly allowance. I was sick for a week, then he left the country to take care of his possibly dying mom. I lost a month of allowance and it put me in a tight spot financially. He’s back now and we resumed things.

I haven’t decided how I feel about the lost income. On one hand I feel like we had an agreement that he didn’t uphold, then on the other hand we didn’t see each other for a month. Is it fair to ask for the missing allowance? Am I putting myself at risk by continuing with home? Is this a normal part of life even in a sugar relationship? I would appreciate any thoughts on the matter or hearing about any similar situations you’ve been through.

FemaleAnonsays:

Him not home

Suger_Bloggersays:

I agree with the article but want opinions on whether my own attitudes towards allowance are realistic:

I’m an SD who approaches SB’s of all expectations except ‘substantial’ (I DO approach SB’s with ‘high’ expectations). My own target range is actually ‘moderate’ and I seem to have little trouble closing arrangements on this basis. My profile says ‘negotiable’ as I suppose I might spontaneously raise my limit if I meet the right SB.

I sometimes approach ‘high’ as well, because I believe SB’s might just choose this option due to high self-esteem (ie they choose ‘high’ for emotional rather than a thought-through reasons).

I have to say, SB’s with ‘high’ expectations are extremely flakey – I don’t think I’ve ever even managed to get one of them to come on the first dinner date. I never remember any of them turning me down because I offered too little (this has happened with SB’s with ‘negotiable’ expectations but, fair enough – that’s why it’s called ‘negotiable’).

I don’t approach SB’s with ‘substantial’ expectations because I think this option reflects the fact that the SB has really THOUGHT about what she wants, and I’ve consistently closed very satisfying arrangements in the moderate range. I also don’t see any preponderance of hotter, prettier SB’s with this expectation – there are plenty of nice ladies at all expectation levels.

Although I’m satisfied, I would still like your opinion:
a) should I STOP approaching SB’s with ‘HIGH’ expectations entirely? I have to say there are certain profiles that ooze ‘gold-digger’ vibes and I don’t approach them anyway (not even if their expectation is ‘negotiable’) – I mean excluding even a nice, natural seeming SB’s just because they have high expectations.
b) should I START approaching SB’s with ‘SUBSTANTIAL’ expectations to see if they really want this amount in cash from me personally? I’ve considered this in the past, but the very word is more financial and I just assume there’s was no ’emotional’ dimension to choosing that expectation (ie they say what they mean, and inviting them to dinners would just waste my time and theirs).

What do you think?

Ashsays:

I think you’re thinking about there words too much. Just look for the profiles of women you like and don’t worry about what they’re expecting, because you have a lot to offer. I think sugar babies just put a higher # as an ideal, not nessacerily a definite cause there are a ton of what we call “salt daddies” (guys who wanna be SDs, but are cheapskates) that we have to sort through.

Find a girl your crazy about and spoil her pretty ass.

Anonymoussays:

Wat she said ^ !!

Miasays:

That is ridiculous, to put it nicely! I put substantial because I have in fact thought it through PROPERLY and I’m realistic. I know what I need to cover, I am not asking for a ridiculous price because I find the more you ask the less you actually get. I had a great arrangement, 3k per month and he paid for my uni year, plus text books etc.

Why did he pay that much? He paid that much because I wasn’t greedy, nor was I asking for a lot! I was asking for what I needed, nothing more and nothing less! You’re looking way too much into this.

celiasays:

hey, a sugardaddy who lives not in the same contry of me want to make an arangement with me. We have talk in person (he came in my cities) so, he want I come in plane but, how can I make it without said him my name ?

Goldensays:

I don’t think you can fly to him without giving him your real name since he will be the one to pay for your travel expenses. For the fact that you just met, I wouldn’t advise you to travel to him. Let him continue to come to you, and when you are comfortable with him, then you can give him your first and last name.
I don’t think it’s even wise to travel to meet a sugar daddy because your life will be in his hands once you get to his place.

Miasays:

DONT EVER DO THIS! It’s so dangerous! I had one who lived near me become obsessive and scary, I’d never travel to one!

Goldensays:

I met a man online and he is 25 years older than me. We had a nice first date. During the 2nd date& third date, we made out, there was no sex. I brought up the issue of sugar daddy&baby, and he doesn’t like that. He’s divorced. He wants to keep seeing me, but I want money to be involved. I asked him for some money to pay off my loans and surprisingly, he said he needs to confirm if the specified amount is exactly the loan. During the third date I asked him what type of relationship he wants, he only said lets see how it goes. But it’s as if he’s exploiting my youthfulness, he wants the benefits in a dating relationship like kissing, cuddling, and snuggling, and making out without giving me what I want. He said he really likes me and want me to be happy, but anytime I bring up money matters, he feels uncomfortable. Should I lost his contact and move on to other aspiring men or should I explain what I really want to him? I’m confused, could someone tell me what to do? Thanks. I’m 19

Anonymoussays:

Be open and be honest about the debts are stressing you out. Explain to him and show him what your financial requirements are . . . without coming across as if you were shopping for the highest bidder (because you don’t want him to quit on you the moment he finds someone hotter than you and less expensive than you, either; he can find that quickly if the number is more than minimal). It would also help if you can demonstrate that you and your family are doing your own best to pay off the loans and/or preventing it from growing out of hand, especially if you are asking more than median individual income in this country, lest he thinks you are just exploiting him.

Goldensays:

I actually work hard to pay my bills. Is $2000 a huge amount for a 5 figure man to pay for a girl he goes out with? I think it’s high time I stopped seeing this man. I believe that I’m not asking for much. I’m young,pretty, and hot. I have many alternatives that are far better, and handsome. I’m just trying to see if
he could be of little help or just drop him.

Anonymoussays:

A $2k/mo contribution is quite affordable for someone making $150-250k (don’t forget the tax bite on his income). If his income is below $100k (“a 5 figure man”), you may want to drop him and consider one of your “far better” options as he may not be able to afford it unless he already has his house paid for and/or is very tax-efficient when it comes to what is considered “income.”

Bobsays:

If he is 5 figure per month you are right, assuming you mean $2k per month allowance. If he is 5 figure a year he almost always can’t afford anything near it.
He met you on this site and he knows the deal. You do not need to prove that you are working hard to pay the debt! Would he have to justify the amount he claims to be earning if you do? [Rhetorical question – obviously he won’t.]
Ken is right. Drop this guy immediately, but do it without any nasty comment. Just say other opportunities have come your way. Safer that way, just in case.

Anonymoussays:

I thought “met online” meant meeting on some conventional dating site therefore he doesn’t like the sugar talk. If you two met on a sugar site like SA, then yes his refusing to talk about it is utter BS.

Bobsays:

Agreed. And if they met on a “regular” dating site I’d say she shouldn’t be asking at all.

KenSDsays:

BLOCK! DELETE! if possible a restraining order. He is using you. Your instinct is correct. He wants to confirm if it’s the exact amount? lol. Thats a red flag. He is Stingy! He won’t give you the money and if he does, it won’t be close to what you are asking. You are 19 not 33. You can get do better.

Anonymoussays:

Sheesh, they did not meet on SA but via normal dating. While I agree that he may not be able to afford her, therefore the relationship will probably end if she has a sugar requirement, excessive use of restraining orders before there is anything of stalking from him is not a good idea: you will have a track record of these and make the judge look askance the next time when you really need one.

Goldensays:

Thanks for your advice. I will not contact him or pick his call anymore. I called him twice yesterday but he didn’t pick my call. Thanks to heaven that he hasn’t slept with me. He probably thought I’m too naive to know what I really want. On our second date when I was going through his phone, i realized that he’s on another account called fuck date.com.
I will not settle down for less…he told me some irritating stories that he likes talking to me more than his ex-wife, and he already told his brother and his wife about me. And that they will like to see me if I can visit him in his house. Deep down I was like what the f***k. He has my real phone number, but I only have his google voice number. If he contact me, I won’t pick his calls or reply his messages. He just wants to have fun for free. Did I mention that during our third date, he playfully said it’s my turn to pay for the date. As I grabbed my purse to pay, he said he was kidding.

Dump him if nothing else then due to the fact that he is careless enough to let you look through his phone.

My phone locks itself after 30 seconds of inactivity. I tried the 15 seconds option but that is pain in the ass.

Anonymoussays:

@Golden

SA is a much better environment than conventional dating sites when you need sugar. At least the issue is much more open and straight forward so you don’t have to waste time, and SA’s subscription requirement does put in some kind of pre-screening for you. Getting a Google Voice number for yourself is also a good idea, so you can easily change the number if it ever becomes a stalking situation. Heck, it should probably be considered in any dating situation. LOL.

One thing to watch out for on SA is that, if you have a sustained sugar requirement in order to meet a certain goal, and you have no other way of meeting it on your own, pick and choose SD/sponsor carefully and honestly. Your $2k/mo requirement should enable you to choose from quite a few good honest sponsors who can stick by you at that level for however long it takes to solve your problem; some may even deliver much more than he promises per month because of a good match and you contribute to his life. Don’t get carried away by high promises from “soft”-con-artists who prop you a high number then have no intention to stick around after a short time, disrupting your life when they quit on you and forcing you into SD-hopping.

UltimateSBsays:

@Golden. He sounds like a jerk. A woman deserves to be treated right no matter the arrangement be it financial or otherwise. You don’t even have his real phone number? that sounds so dodgy to me. He is going to contact soon. And when he does he will try to explain his way out of the situation or even offer you the money you ask for. I would suggest you don’t accept it and cut him off entirely. Because the only thing that is keeping him from disappearing totally is that he hasn’t yet slept with you. And once he gets that;Game over!You won’t see him again.

Anonymoussays:

Using Google Voice is quite common nowadays as primary number, even for business purpose, because text storage is unlimited and searchable; plus not having to worry about text records being gone when the phone is lost/damaged/upgraded. I forward my GV number to 3 different smart phones that I have, and usually only carry one or two of them with me at any time, in order to minimize microwave exposure to myself.

Soniasays:

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Nicolesays:

Hello I’m having some trouble with finding a SD, how do I seem more appealing? I thought my profile was up to par but guess not, I’m not receiving any messages from anyone! I’m an African American female who is attractive and educated, I don’t know what can be done to get more messages from guys or to spark their interest, It’s very frustrating anything will help any useful advice! Thanks.

Anonymoussays:

Hey Nicole, I’m African American and I’ve been greeting hits since I signed up. Everytime I check it, there are atleast ten new messages in my inbox. We do get a lot of love in this game, you just gotta know how to play it. At the moment I have two financially supportive SDs that live by me who I see on a regular basis and one is flying in tonight whom I’ll be staying with until Sunday at the Ritz Carlton. All of them are successful white especially and absolutely love that I’m a strong minded black woman. I thought I came off too demanding on my profile but that’s what they said they liked most. We black women can always win, just don’t give up.

Anonymoussays:

How much did u ask for a month? My SD is offering 2k “for starters” but he’s in the 6-7figure range. We haven’t discussed particulars but 3k a month plus shopping is ideal for me. Not sure how to go abt asking for it.

Anonymoussays:

It’d be nice that this SB writes a guide for other clueless black women how to get sugar.

Bellesays:

Same for me am well mannered cultered dress really elegant ,polished makeup,I get attention while am out on a normal day ,but from the site I don’t get much attention ,I had to tell my Caucasian friend to register on the site we both attractive but guess what ,she got huge mail with lots of offers within 2days,white. Skin sells thou.and I hve another complain the site seems to send her notification but me no .i don’t know why ,this affected my self esteem for a month then I looked in the mirror and see how beautiful i am ,the few sugar daddy I met on the site seems to be amaze at my personalit.

Anonymoussays:

I am an african American on the site and I have two sugar daddies, one in Maine and one in NC. One gives me a $2000 weekly allowance and the other $6000 a monthe. Maybe you need to change your profile pick or your profile. And one Sugar Daddy is white, and one Latin.

Autumnsays:

“It may be best for Babies to accept what is offered and enjoy that before demanding, or even suggesting, a regular amount of cash” That is some bull crap. Ladies, know your worth. No, you’re not an escort but it would be worth your while to do some research and learn what an escort service provides for a client and how much they charge. There are many men on here that don’t want to pay $500-2k for an evening with an escort and they know SB’s will “accept what is offered and enjoy that before demanding” so they prey on us. This is a little secret seeking arrangement doesn’t want you know. These dudes need to remember that we are NOT here for sex. We are beautiful women and don’t need this website for that. If these guys have a problem with that then they should be calling an escort agency. SeekingArrangement should not be seen as place for creepy men to get discount companionship.

I am new to this and shy about the allowance part and how to answer that question when I really don’t know. What should I say?

Anonymoussays:

How about ATM?

Suger_Bloggersays:

@Lookingforsomefun101: I’m surprised nobody answered you – a real SD should firstly bring up the issue himself. It’s OK if you need to mention that you are interested in allowance if he hasn’t brought it up yet towards the end of the first meeting (which should usually be a nice dinner).

However, that’s all you should need to do – just bring up the subject. A SugarDaddy should take the initiative when it comes to allowance. If it’s not enough (given all the other expectations you’ve discussed), then you have every right to tell him. HOWEVER, if it’s WAY under, then it’s probably best to nod politely and make a polite excuse to leave. If it’s fairly close (like within 50%) then I don’t think it’s really necessary to mention an amount – he should again take the initiative and come up with a higher bid himself (if he’s interested). Repeat until it’s clear whether you’ll come to an arrangement or not.

Sobadttsays:

I give my sd my phone # and he call me but up front he ask me when am free and he want to meet me and he ask me how much money i want but i dont know how to tell him its my 1st time doing this should i meet him what should i do please up me

Long Tall Texansays:

So I’m trying to get a grip as to what is expected for the SD for the practical amount of 3K? Can any one of you give me an ideal?

Vansays:

@Josh you’re absolutely wrong as can be.
Women close their legs and demand because these men are unattractive as they come and uncharismatic, creepy, anti social, closed mined etc. The list can go on and on, I get high allowances but if that would be taken out of the picture I would never go for these men. They are just awkward as F and even the semi-attractive ones are just plain weirdos I wouldn’t even have a tinder one night stand with. These are just based off the ones I meet once, the high rollers are narcissistic as they come and want the hottest and youngest ass to show his dominance. Lets face it if you were not a weirdo you wouldn’t feel the need to put brad pitt as your picture…JS

I enjoy reading the comments on here. They provide entertainment. Thank you

I enjoy reading the comments on here. They provide entertainment. Thank you

Caseysays:

How do you handle out of state/country transactions?
I have one whom wants to pay me monthly, but he wont let me give him my bank account info. Don’t worry, I didn’t offer. I know better.
I wont give y home address either.

Bartolosays:

I have no idea why I went from reading the most current topic to one 4 months old; whacky blog software.

@Casey and Cassie for your replies, very helpful information and I appreciate it!!

@Casey: Thanks for you reply above, it came right on time. I’ve been thinking to myself that he could be a fake as I’ve never spoken to him by phone and everytime I mention us speaking by phone he claims to be busy with his kids and having to take them to sports games, etc. I know that most SD’s are probably busy but I can’t fathom wanting to have sex with someone you’ve never spoken to or met yet but he seems way too anxious to want to have sex. He comes off as being nice but when I mentioned to him that I wanted to talk about the arrangement more he gets pissed off and blows me off, I mentioned to him via text yesterday that I was a little skeptical about meeting him at a public place per my idea as he wanted to meet for the first time at his house and mentioned again about having sex. I stated to him that he mentioned previously that he was interested in a physical relationship with benefits and I misunderstood that as him wanting to see me physically and get to know each other and see where things would go from there. He said he has no time to date maybe an hour here and there and that his kids are most important and his business so I said it sounds like to me you’re looking for an escort, prostitute or a stripper that you can pay for sex and that’s not what I am nor do I become any of that. I said please don’t take this the wrong way but if you don’t have time for anything but sex then maybe you should consider a escort, prostitute, porn star, etc that is looking just for sex. He responded by saying he was offended and insulted and I stated that “it may sound that way because we are texting which is why I wanted to discuss my concerns by phone for clarification and my safety. He instantly replied Good luck and safe travels as I am out of town. My response and last message was “I hear you and it’s sad that you are refusing to discuss my concerns. It proves my point that you were not interested in me for the right reasons and I was actually looking forward to getting to know you but good luck to you too”. He’s had other SB that have not worked out as he says for chemistry reasons but I think he lacks common sense and doesn’t think that we as SB’s will call his bluff on his BS. The very first message he sent was off gate offering something he more than likely cannot uphold to and why if your income in truly what you say would you offer less than my budget on my profile and try to down play what I specifically state I’m looking for? He’s a nut case, not background verified, seems psycho and disturbed and I’m glad I spared myself the headache early on. Now I’m sure I could have handled it a little better but lesson learned as this all brand new to me

Ladybabysays:

You go girl! Be safe

Caseysays:

I found this old thread
Rebecca says:
March 3, 2015 at 5:11 pm
I stumbled upon another forum. It is a bunch of men talking about how they’re “banging” girls and scamming them into thinking they are a SD
___________________
I’ve played too many games! The way I’ve done it now because I’m not in a rush, if I’ve said I’m looking for allowance and I won’t give you sex until I get it.

I chat a few times on the site, if they have stuck to their story about what I’m looking for and what they are, I give them my email address. That’s when it changes.

If it hasn’t, I give them my google voice number and then you see it!

I give it about 10 back and forths before my number. I list my deal breakers, but I also in real life would never drink a smoker and a few other things. I’m not asking they don’t.

I don’t judge people if they are married, but it’s taught me a lot.
Everyone’s situation is different. I’ve met one, his wife was in a permanent mental home. Another was impotent and some, it’s too expensive to get a divorce so they have a don’t ask, don’t tell policy. Some even have an open marriage so to judge someone on their marriage I think is wrong, but to have it open your eyes and decide what you want. Now, that I agree with.

SB1986@ This what I would say. and if your afraid, do it in a text or email. Easier to walk away Just say I’ve been thinking realizing, that won’t cover the costs and I really only want you as my sugar daddy, no one else.

I had one guy that wanted to go on a few dates first. After that, he’d give me an allowance based on my performance in bed. I said goodbye. Now he wont stop texting me saying how much he misses me and he’s falling in love.

Thanks NC Gent I think it’s pretty low as well. He said he wants an intimate (sex and a normal relationship) looking for long term situation but seeing me 5-6 times a month. The cost of living is pretty expensive where I live. How should I ask for a better allowance? And if it were you and I what type of allowance would you offer me for what he’s asking me for?

NC Gentsays:

SB1986 — that is on the low side for how often you will see him. It also depends on whether you actually enjoy hanging out with him. I have had SBs with that amount, and we hung out even more than that, but we weren’t always intimate. I am not sure of the cost of living in your area either. That is pretty good money here.

A lot of it depends on the amount of time your with someone. I think $300 per visit is normal if your new but the visit should be short. If he wants a longer visit, then yes, more

I have a question for you all, this is my first time having an arrangement and he offered $1000 per month for 5-6 times a month that we see each other. I think the figure is a little low for me considering the frequency he wants to see and his net worth shows as 2 million and income is listed as 500,000. What would you do in this situation to negotiate for a higher allowance? On my profile i stated Practical for my allowance and what he’s offering considering his income I think is a true low ball situation and he wants a physical relationship mainly.

Ladybabysays:

Absolutely not okay! You have precious time. Don’t ever under value yourself. If he wants to pay 100-300 a date then he clearly just wants an escort/prostitute. The SB/SD relationship is so much more than that. He can be your mentor and and help you grow: he should want to do more for you. Don’t let them take advantage of you. That will cause you to regret ever being a SB.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

ANYONE advocating your “time” as a SB in an arrangement is pushing your toward escorting.

You listed your Expectations as Practical…that’s $1-3k per month…he may have offered the lower end of the spectrum, but maybe he’s had women bail quickly…he wants to see how you fill the role of SB before giving you a raise…

Instead of looking at his income and assets (which are probably not real, by the way) look at what he’s offering you…is he going to provide mentoring for your school or career? is he going to cover the costs of entertainment and lodging as you meet?

Don’t piss away a great opportunity because you’re being pushed into the realm of escorts by the “value” of your time…remember…the SD has valuable time as well, and at $500k a year that means his couple hour date is pretty valuable to him (even if he lies about his income, it’s probably more than yours, right?)

I’ve NEVER started with the top end of my budget with a SB…I’ve had a couple of arrangements that lasted YEARS each…it’s not about what he STARTS with, it’s what he does for you over the course of the arrangement…

If you’re concerned about the amount offered, you CAN negotiate with him…tell him, “I’m fine with that to start, but I’m really hoping to XXX, XXXX, XXXX with this money…I was thinking $2,500 a month was more in line with my goals…can we work toward that amount?”

See, now you’re negotiating…you’re setting an expectation ($2,500 a month), and looking for a timeline to get to that point…until then, you better show him how you’re contributing to the arrangement, or he’ll end things before that deadline though…negotiation goes TWO ways!

I’m sorry you aren’t having any success here. I can certainly see why. Your problems are too many and too deeply rooted for me to try to help you, but perhaps someone else will.

All the best.

Casiesays:

I’m new, but let me chime in here.
First, as a baby, I wish men would just say how much right away they can pay! It makes things a lot less uncomfortable.

I had someone I went on a couple of dates with. We had amazing chemistry then he said he would wait to see how the sex was to determine what I was worth. I stood up and said goodbye. He has not stopped calling or texting. He misses me terribly.

I had another guy tell me after 3 dates he expected sex. I said goodbye. He kept calling me for about a week then told me he met someone else but has decided to take things slow with her.

Like one of the guys on here likes to compare this to as a job, it’s true.
How would you like it if your boss decided not to pay you until he felt your job was what he wanted? It could take awhile.

If your looking for that amazing sex, you need chemistry and that takes time.

If you are meeting college girls, most likely, they are going to be praying for you to hurry up and finish so they can collect their pay check.

To spot a fake. This is what I do with my daddies. I usually have them coming back asking for forgiveness but I don’t play games.

I’m looking for only one daddy. I’m up front and honest. I know how much I need.
I have no problem finding sex in 10 minutes or getting a boyfriend or a boy toy for that matter. That’s not what I’m looking for.

The way I do it is, if I already have a date lined up, I don’t mind taking my time and talking with someone until I have availability. I like to book my dates out 2 weeks in advance.

Usually within those 2 weeks, you can tell if it’s going anywhere
Don’t..!! Give away your photos, sex talk, web cam sex anything! Dont! And if they ask, they are fakes! I don’t even give out my email address until I feel a connection. Once I’ve seen their photo and I am hoping this goes somewhere, I’ll give my phone number (I use google voice). Within 2 weeks you know if they are real or fake.

If they take you on two dates and money still has not been discussed, bring it up. If your shy, email it. It’s okay. Men are also afraid they can’t offer you enough. Be realistic in your wants. If you need more than one daddy, let them both know.

I’m a true believer in honesty!!! I will not lie, but I can be discrete.
I will not rush sex or have it with someone I’m not attracted to.

I’m very attractive, but I also know that daddies work hard for their money and I’m not going to abuse that opportunity.

Gentleman Matthewsays:

I have been trying to figure when to make an offer or even when to tell a potsb what my offer is. I know how much I can afford in an allowance, adventure, and gifts. I know what I want, sex and adventure partner. I’m being contacted by bunches of college girls who have never had an arrangement before. Neither have I. I have 3 dates lined up.

Should I put it out there in our emailing so she knows what my limits are?
Should I put it out there on the first date if I like her?
How many dates on average should I take her on for before I can have a reasonable expectation of sex?
I don’t think I should start an allowance until we have sex.

Looking for someone to get me up to speed. I don’t want to be taken advantage of and I surely don’t want to take advantage of a young woman.

Thanks ahead of time.

Sugarsugar09says:

Not paying until you have sex is prostitution NOT a sugar arrangement. And the caliber of the women here means that if you treat her like she’s only a sexual toy she’ll see right through you, leaving you to play with escorts and clueless desperate girls.

what a great read. thanks everyone for sharing their thoughts. New to this being a SD thing so still learning but to be able to achieve happiness with a little $$ is just so liberating

jasonsays:

this is too funny

JenniferFsays:

Hi everyone!:) Im new to this website i signed up like 3 days ago and i am actually asking for some advice to all the sugar babies i have a lot of questions to ask actually like do some mens give straight cash and not material? Can you ask if he can proove to you that he is clean? is there mens that care if i just give them a blowjobb and i dont have sex wit them??

Casiesays:

How do I add a photo? I have a question

Casiesays:

I really like the idea of being paid daily. I think that’s fair.
People get busy, but I’m always early.
These are my questions.
1. Where can I turn a daddy to so he understands what a daddy is? It seems most really don’t have a clue.
2. How long do you chat until you come to an agreement that this is where it’s going?
I have some that just play games to see what they can get for free or if they can change me.

I’m exhausted. I want one real person. What’s a good amount of time to give someone if they don’t live near you before you move onto the next hopefully real one?

I’ve been told that I have a cut and copy email, but I assure you, it’s not.
IF I take the time to write about something I’m passionate about, it comes out.

I also talk like that. I dislike it when someone who’s never spoken to me says that I write something up and paste it to every interested guy.

Casiesays:

lol I don’t understand. When I accept a job, I know what I am being hired for. When I talk with these men, they know what I’m looking for. Lets do it this way.

A recruiter calls me. He/She already knows what kind of position works for me. He’s got my profile.
They ask if I’m open to this or that and I say yes or no.
I go into the interview. Everything is great.
I’m hired
First day on the job.. it changes. I am not qualified for this position

Do you say the same thing to the employer who gives you a job?

Casiesays:

Oh and before I’m asked. We went on two dates.
Lunch at Applebees and dinner at Jason’s Deli.

Casiesays:

I’ve chated with a few men. Had amazing connections.
First, I never give out my email address or number unless they are real.
I’ve met so many fakes and they harass me.
I’ve had two claim they’ve fallen in love with me and one say they are falling.
I’m not telling them anything of that sort, other than giving them attention.
I’ve not kissed or had sex.
The problem is, once you have an arrangement, you meet them, they change it.
I had one tell me we’ll take things slow and if sex happens, it happens but he wont give me an allowance until he knows how I am in bed. This is the same guy that wants a committed relationship from me and wont stop harassing me.

I’m exhausted. I don’t know how to tell the good ones from the bad ones. Most of the time I do, but not always.

I’m very clear in what I want. The problem is, most men think a sugar baby is paid to be submissive, always available and to be a slave.

“@Josh
Hey, so I see you can suggest on profile writing. care to look at mine?”

Post your profile id in the comments section of the newest blog. That’s where we hang out.

SA_or_NAsays:

When is there going to be an informative article for SDs? Seems there are tons for SBs but none for SDs.

Being new to the site (and to the concept) I find myself wondering exactly how these arrangements begin?

Am to just hand over $1000-3000 cash and hope they meet their end of the bargain and show up next time? Or do I give them a significant “per visit” charge? And do I pay upfront or at the end?

So far my experiences on SA have not been ideal:
1. Paid for a nice dinner with an average-looking girl 15 years my junior. Fairly fun time then she asked me to drive her home (lived with her parents) – it was an hour away. Told her nicely “no way.”
2. Had dinner with an average-looking Asian immigrant 10 years my junior. Somewhat interesting and better than eating alone I suppose. Dropped her off. She called me later in the week and offered to come over for $500. If I’m going to give a girl $500 per visit she’d better be crème of the crop. I laughed as I hung up the phone (and she is still texting me.)
3. Made plans 3 times to meet up with “miss flakey.” Once she wanted to postpone and hour. No. Then we made other plans and she was going to be late again. No. Last time she seemed to feel bad and really wanted to meet but then canceled. She is 24 and I’m still trying to figure out if she is a complete idiot or possibly a diamond in the rough and is trying to convince herself to be a SB.
4. I’ve received numerous emails from girls that are surely cut and pastes about wanting an allowance and stating their intentions. The writing style is like they got it from a blog or had a businessman or attorney draft it up for them.

A buddy of mine turned me on to SA after he used it to find a quality SB. But even he says that SA has changed and that most of these POT SBs seem out of their mind.

Nevertheless, still awaiting those blog articles offering help to SDs.

Miasays:

How rude! I mean really, you’re talking down these women calling them “average” looking. I do hope you’re a Calvin Klein model to be able to sit on your high horse like that, judging women poorly on their looks. Why would you go out with someone you weren’t really attracted to? You have to remember these “average” women probably think the same about you as well! Just rude!

@lots of sd

Sending a car for a first meet should raise a red flag for a newbie SB Too much loss of control

True

Pathfindersays:

Hey ya’ll
Need some advice
Most messages I got here is all about having sex, tired of hearing this crap from SDs’s texting me. So I put on my profile I’m not looking for sex, still they start texting and request for more pics, then again we come back to the same spot, sex!! Ain’t that stupid!

Why do people bring there kids to their appointments and act like I’m supposed to be happy to talk to their kids? WTF is wrong with people. Do you want some crumb snatcher distracting you from your job. Ugh#

@McDreamy Everybody has a line. I respect that! But as you stare at my gravatar I know what you are imagining between my lips. 😉

Annikasays:

I can’t speak for anyone, but I’ve had fairly good experience on the site. I’ve been sugar dating for 2 years now (I am 21, btw) and I think the reason I’ve been so successful is I never “beat around the bush” and cut straight to the chase. You see, you should know what your expectations are and what you want and let your potential sugar know too. If you’re on the edge and undecided, they will notice that and try to take advantage. Also, you’ll get a lot of “no’s” before you get a yes. Be patient.

My last SD was a multi millionaire. He had a mansion in my hometown that he only visited once a month, so I pretty much knew he was loaded. Anyways, he gave me 1000 each time we got together. He also gave me money for school books, vacations, etc. and put down 1500 towards my deposit for my condo. I cared for him a lot and was very sad when our arrangement came to an end. I knew I had lucked up and I knew it would be difficult to find someone as good again!

However, I have met someone new who I see once a week. He lives about 2 hours away but I drive to see him. He’s in his mid 30’s, divorced, very attractive, and very normal. I really lucked up on him because he gives me 2000 each time I see him. Now keep in mind, I am blonde haired, green eyed, petite, and have been told I favor Candice Swanepoel (Victoria’s Secret model). I don’t want to sound arrogant, but my looks take me far, but my brain and my heart reels them in. If you find someone who really likes you, they will take care of you.

I’ve been very fortunate and I know many others are not in the same boat, but like I said it all boils down to knowing what you want and need. If you rent is 500-700 a month, you probably don’t need thousands a month. But if you’re like me, and you rent is 1500 a month alone, you have to know that 250 here and there won’t work. There’s a lot of great men on this site who don’t make as much and are willing to spend more, and then there’s a lot of men who make a lot but aren’t willing to spend as much. Just stay true to yourself, be clear, and stop assuming everyone who messages you is legit. I never spend a lot of time messaging back and forth.

Great advice! Know what you want and stick to it. The last thing a SD wants to hear after an offer is, “ohhh, IDK what I want,” for heaven’s sake know what you want.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Josh
This IS possible and your denial that it could only adds to the destruction and delay of a healthy and evolving society.

I appreciate that your experience is very real to you, but any of us would be highly ignorant to assume that our own experience is that of the rest and defines what is possible.

Josh, honestly, why can no one share anything here that isn’t completely in alignment with your own keeling, without you casting a miserable shadow upon it ? I am not being ridiculous, only honest about MY experience. What makes you think your experience is so far above and more important than mine and others’ that you continually dog anyone who has a different one than your own?

Bitterness clearly is eating you alive. You can’t even see the good that does exist. I feel bad for you.

At any given moment one of her needs would be more pressing than the other. So the man identifies, which need is more pressing and works with that.

StruggleIsRealsays:

*men
(Not “mean”)

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Kenna
I don’t know of which apps are best for pregnancy, but you should so a little research and find a couple that your man can have to help him be more informed about what you are going through.

I find it incredibly sexy and amazing when a man is attuned to his woman’s biology, ESPECIALLY if she is producing his progeny!

And I will honestly say that it is incredibly helpful for a man to help lovingly point out things to his woman from a perspective that she can’t possibly have. To all you mean who complain about a woman’s fluctuating hormones… I get it. But imagine actually being the one who is nearly defenseless to her own biology. A strong and caring man can help sooooo immensely.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Kenna
Yes love! It makes me happy to see others like myself (= you) who understand this and practice it with success! We have to try to spread this to other women and also inform men about how to be truly powerful.

Also, I will note that while our men are both dominant and alpha etc, they give great care and consideration to their women (you & I). I know you have said that your man has a hormone tracker app that helps him understand what you are (or, were!) going through, with your monthly cycle.

SD just circled a bit on mine and sent it to me about a week ago. I was out of town working and he called as I was in bed and going to sleep. Apparently I was talking really fast and he honestly thought I had taken some sort of drugs or something. He didn’t express this to me but did keep saying, “You don’t sound like you’re going to bed….”. I couldn’t really understand. I was truly in bed. I figured I was just excited and happy to talk to him, and reassured him that I was in bed and just maybe just amped to talk to him.

Well, the next day, he read my “hormone horoscope” and he actually became a legit believer. It said that due to the massive spike of estrogen in my system, I would likely be very energized and talking faster than normal, leaving the males around me in dust. He literally was like “wow… This is for real.” He now has downloaded two more cycle apps and gets notifications daily from them!

All that to say, he gives great consideration to me and my biological functions and also my complex feelings. He doesn’t devalue or diminish them but listens with care, and when it really is just too much he will lay down the hammer, and he knows I will respect that.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Josh
Can you qualify “needy” please?
The general stigma with that word is not a good one, but I will happily admit that I am in NEED of a worthy man’s power over me. Can I live without it? Yes, I have and could continue to. But it is an innate need and once it has been proved to me that someone can fulfill that need, I will not betray said provider, unless there are greater consequences to satisfying this need.

@Struggle

Yes, you hit the nail right on the head. My man does not allow me to fall out of line even when I’m moody, I too need that control!

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Josh@FatBastard
If I could find a penis on me, or any masculine physical characteristic, I would completely be on board with you both.
Honestly, I often say that I feel like a dude in a woman’s body. All jokes aside, I’m really kind of serious. It is incredibly frustrating to be looked upon as a freak or weirdo by my own gender for the way I view things.
It doesn’t break me down but just makes me pity the large amount of women who have it all so wrong. That said, I also pity most men too. They try to exert their “force” in the silliest and most asinine of ways.

There a few of either gender that I truly respect and identify with.

Joshsays:

@Struggle,

“A true dominant doesn’t have to do this. He makes his woman WANT to follow him, willingly, of her own volition.”

That only happens when you manipulate women. A straightforward guy has no idea where the to start. Therefore, the easiest approach in dealing with a woman is to engage with her at the hour of her need, whatever the fuck that might be, and disengage as the need is no more. If she is not needy she’s going to act erratic.

Joshsays:

“gentleman soul/Josh says:”

Hahahahahaha!!! Good one.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Kenna
Hehe I think we have similar fun times with our SDs.
Men truly are so easy to keep happy and women are truly more complicated and we do tend to self-sabotage, as @Josh always points out. A good man can point this out to a good woman, with love and care, before she goes too far with it. He is also right that men tend to vascilate between “dumb and dumber”. A smart man will listen to his woman when she is in control of her facilities and is sharing her feelings without defense mechanisms overriding.
I honestly NEED that domination, that control over me, because I know my head can go wacky sometimes. It is a great relief to hand that over to a man I trust and can relinquish that responsibility to. That said, only recently have I actually found someone who can actually do that.

Another funny thing… Men who don’t understand true dominance and authority tend to think it’s just coming in and calling the shots with an unyielding hand and treating their women like underlings. Gosh it is entirely opposite! A true dominant doesn’t have to do this. He makes his woman WANT to follow him, willingly, of her own volition. I have free will but I am slave to my own desire and need for my man. When he stops me and says that I am getting of track, I just listen and yield to him. It is such a weight off of my shoulders.

The simplicity of men is a great boon to women who actually appreciate it. And likewise, the complexities of a woman are a boon to a men who appreciate them as well.

“Of course it helps that I’m significantly younger than him so by the time I’m in my mid forties, he will be in his 70s haha.”

He will be minding his own business and you will be yours. 😉

Joshsays:

I wrote a couple of posts above about marriage. I am consolidating it in the following statements:

American women are experts in fucking their men in their ass on a daily basis with wire bottle brush along with giving them frequent mindfucks, which culminates into hitting the male with a wrecking ball on his spine at divorce.

The man first has to take care of the household by busting his ass outside the house, then has to “share” household chores, and then has to do “little little” things to keep his woman happy, which they never will be. Therefore, long-term anything with any woman, especially American/Western woman is exercise in futility.

That’s one of the reasons this site exists. It boggles my mind that whenever a new guy comes with his complaints about his wife, most women go, “oh you got unlucky with a bad piece. Try again, and you would be surprised how much happiness she can bring in your life.”

No, the whole gender is fucked up. It lives in a fantasyland and cooperates with men when it needs something from them.

I feel the same way and I’m almost always horny and ready to be a submissive slut so I can’t imagine ever withholding sex.

Of course it helps that I’m significantly younger than him so by the time I’m in my mid forties, he will be in his 70s haha.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Sorcha
Oh, good! Hehe

@Melissa
Ugh to all these Tumblr and Instagram SBs. I suppose it’s to be expected with how everyone (especially the younger set) just has to advertise EVERYTHING these days via social media… But just UGH, GROSS.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Jimsax
I agree with everything you said.

I am submissive and my BF/SD is a kind and just ruler. He considers my feelings and cherishes them, and I give him ultimate respect and authority. I would never withhold sex from him, even if I was angry with him. Perhaps only if I was truly sick to the point of great discomfort, and/or it was truly painful for me for whatever reason. I would remedy the situation quickly or find other means to keep him satisfied. A man needs sex, plain and simple. You are right. Men are so damn easy. My SD has never outsexed me, but admittedly we are a fairly new relationship, so I can’t speak from a lengthy relationship. In my longest relationships of around 4 yrs, I was the one wanting more sex and felt I wasn’t getting enough, even at the bitter end.

Funny that you referred to a woman’s man as “her king”, because that is actually what I call my man– “my King”. My phone even capitalizes the word “King” now because of how I punctuate it when referring to him

I have seen incredible men go hungry in many ways when they were strapped into marriages that they entered into with the best of intentions. A man I dated (IRL, not sugar, incredibly hot and kind and desired by other very desirable women, and much older than I) was so good to his wife. Worked so hard. Was loyal to her and went several years with hardly ANY sex from her. It angered me so much that she wielded her power that way, with such an amazing individual. Even to this day he works to provide for her. It actually interfered with our relationship, his dedication to his daughter (wife by proxy) and even still his ex-wife (not at all sexually, but she had beat him down for so long that he will always try to achieve her approval by continuing to support her even beyond the legal requirements. Denying a man sex is just awful, especially over an extended period of time, considering there is not abuse or deception going on.).

The thing is, it is up to you men to help change this trajectory, but it doesn’t help to lump all women into this category. Maybe you guys could identify women who DO seem to provide what a man wants and needs and highlight those women and/or their characteristics.
Admittedly, there are not many… I honestly can’t really see many myself so… Good luck. LoL

gentleman soulsays:

@Jimsax

” Men, stay single and understand that a hot sugar baby that actually enjoys your company is far better and much cheaper than a wife”

Brother, you are preaching to the choir here ! Most of us are here for that very reason. I second the motion . Keep cycling SBs until death do you part .They are motivated to make you happy since there is no contract binding you to them . If they do a good job the relationship should last as long as it’d mutually aggreeable

gentleman soulsays:

LotsOfSDScenarios says:

you sound like a great guy and too forgiving . Glad you found that rare treasure at least once .

A cardinal rule of Sugaring is no allowance until the arrangement is signed ,sealed ,and delivered . Many sbs think they deserve to be paid for the privilege of spending money on them . Other guys on that “KIA” site say no allowance til the panties hit the floor.

ONSD hahaha I love criminal minds!

Most tumblr SBs and ALL instagram SBs are just tacky! The have no idea what being discrete means. The comments under the things they post just take the cake!

Jimsaxsays:

To those that were discussing marriage. Here is some wisdom!!! Men, never marry a woman if you have money, because once you do, unless you have an iron clad prenup, you are essentially agreeing to give half of your life’s hard work to that woman. You are also guaranteeing yourself unhappiness later in life.

Once the new wears off and she gives you a few kids, it’s all down hill. Some marriages take longer than others, but I know this for a fact from discussing with other married men. Somewhere around the 10 year mark, give or take a couple of years is the usual time frame. The women stop wanting to offer any value to their man for the most part. They just want you to provide for them and their kids, and they no longer want to give in return. And no, I’m not some fat old man that treats his wife like a slave, and I am not some womanizer either. I am an attractive and fit man who is financially set, who is forced to find me a SB in order to fulfill my most basic needs because my wife will not. I also have talked to many long time married men, and 90% of them say the same things. Their wives lose interest in sex and no longer provide them with value. They just bitch, complain and take from the relationship expecting you to stay the course and work and provide for her and “her” kids.

That’s right, as the father, forget that they are your kids, because in her eyes, she birthed them and she raised them in many cases, so they are her kids! Guess what, the courts usually agree with her as well.

Men, stay single and understand that a hot sugar baby that actually enjoys your company is far better and much cheaper than a wife. Once the sugar baby gets old or stops fulfilling your needs, you can trade her for a newer and younger model, but if you decide to trade in that wife, she’s leaving with a minimum of half of everything you have, maybe more than half! Then she will join a gym, lose weight, start dressing sexy again and all with your hard earned money and assets, because she will need to trap another man and start the cycle over again for some unsuspecting man that thinks he will gain a life of love and bliss with her. If he only knew the truth!!!

Men are easy women… feed them well and provide them with all the sex they need and you can keep them for life. Men are simple creatures and we are motivated by food and sex. Really, it’s that simple! But married women for whatever reason forget this or else they let themselves go and/or lose interest in sex. I know some men are just dicks and no matter how much you fulfill their needs, they will still cheat on you. However, if you keep yourself relatively attractive and keep him fed and milked down consistently, the majority of men will stay the course and you will have a man for life that will provide for you and take care of you and love you.

Men, you have been warned, do not get married! LOL Women, you have been given the keys to the mansion and Mercedes… and it is truly as simple as consistently providing him with his most basic needs…. food and sex. Just make your man think he’s the hottest, biggest and best F*^% in the world, even if he is not! Fake it for him and tell him how good he is and how much you appreciate what he does for you.

Feed him well and give him all the sex he desires and see what happens. You will be a queen to him and he will treat you like one as well! Staying relatively attractive helps too, but it doesn’t mean you can not age or gain weight. As I have aged, I have grown to like my women with more weight on them. No, I don’t like obese women and I still like a hot sexy younger girl that is fit, but curvy is sexy too and I’m still very physically attracted to my wife, but she is a size 8 to 10 now, and not the 3 or 4 she was when I married her.

I would be happy to be with her only, but I need sex more than once a month and I get tired of begging and feeling like I am worthless and not wanted or needed, particularly when other younger and prettier women will gladly do with me what she will not. Many for free as well! My biggest regret was turning down many offers for sex during my 30s and early 40s with younger single women that wanted to give it to me for free, but I said no because my wife was taking great care of me then and it didn’t seem right, so I just said no.

Women, if you choose to let yourself go, bitch and complain at your man all the time, and worst of all, stop having sex with him, then don’t go bat shit crazy when you find he is seeing another younger woman that is willing to give him what he wants the most and what you will not. The sad thing is, most women will read this and scoff and laugh and say I’m crazy or it’s my fault that I am in a marriage like that, but I could care less. I’m just a man of experience that knows the truth and I have done my homework, so I know what I am talking about, even if you won’t accept it.

If you want to be a successful woman that gains the keys to success and happiness, find a man you like being with that has money, then make sure he never goes hungry and that he never wants for your physical attention. Yes, it’s that easy! But for whatever reason, only a few select women ever truly figure this out. Those that do are living the good life and their king is worshiping the ground they walk upon! Listen closely women…. Understand that a woman can be submissive to her husband and still run the show in the end! How do you do that? Well, it’s all here in this post so read it as many times as necessary to learn how to own your men.

I really, really, try very hard not to cross the Married line…

Wow, I just had to hang up on a conference call I was on when I read that.

Distracted for some reason!

Michael

Anyway, when I negotiate an allowance, it usually depends on the man’s salary. I met an SD in Napa Valley, CA in August and he wrote me a check for $3,000, though this man was in his late 50’s but very handsome and sweet.

I would never expect more than 3,000 a month and if I were merely courting a SD without being intimate, I wouldn’t expect money at all because of the travel costs he already took care of. Maybe 50 dollars for a couple drinks and a book at the airport.

LotsOfSDScenariossays:

I’ve been on and off the site as an SD for about 2 years. End of the day, trying a variety of approaches, never found what I was looking for. Here’s a summary of my ‘findings’ and experiences – this blog is actually more fun than the site itself, so I look forward to comments. In my profile, my expectations of the relationship, including $, were very black and white. For me, my offer included $, paying for outings, shopping/gifts (nothing outrageous, but if a girl wanted a dress for a night out, fine by me), help with business contacts/clients/business planning (if the SB wanted). I wanted someone that would enjoy ‘dating’ me – going out on dates, trips and yes, being intimate. The latter not because I was paying for it but well, umm, that’s just what happens when you’re dating – both sides are supposed to want to. As for me, I’ve never ‘dated’ a girl (SB or not) where I didn’t help out with gifts, $ for bills, etc., so the site seemed a natural ‘fishing ground’ for this type of relationship. End of the day, I blame me for maybe not ‘getting it’ as I am the common factor here. I’ve also added statuses of girls paid/not paid and laid/not laid for reference.
Stood Up & Vanished
Five times – younger (college age/early 20s). We’d connect on the site, exchange some emails/phone calls, agree to meet and go from there. On 2 occasions, two hours before we met, agreed to call a car for her to pick her up. No show – no text, email, nothing. Perhaps the girls got scared/nervous and vanish without a trace. My conclusion? Too young/immature or fake profiles. I’m fine with you changing your mind, but how about a little courtesy before going through the hassle of driving to meet up, cancelling dinner, paying for a car, etc.? Didn’t get laid (obviously). Girl never paid.
Overly Demanding / Unrealistic Expectations
On a couple of occasions, offer was made to the girl. Declined because it was ‘not enough.’ I’m ok with that. A couple of months later, a call or text back saying she wanted the deal that was offered. We’d meet, we’d agree and then outlandish demands would transpire – “well that amount doesn’t include XYZ (examples – dental work, my rent, car payment, etc.)” which exponentially increased the ‘offer.’ Didn’t get laid. Girl never paid.
My Time Is Worth Something
This was a common one. By the way, SBs tend to forget that maybe the SD time is valuable, too. In short, if the SB was hanging with me, she wasn’t making any $ doing whatever else she did. I get that, but well, if you’re on the site in the first place complaining about bills, whatever you’re doing probably isn’t working. I’d handle this in a variety of ways – sometimes offer up a few bucks right away to show “I’m serious.” Some girls would take the money and never bother getting back in touch again for a second date. Close to outright thievery, but I can write that off to the SB maybe not ‘feeling chemistry.’ End of the day, these girls were never open to any form of relationship. They felt entitled to get cash to hang out with you and have dinner. Any mention of ‘wanting some more’ was always rejected, which again, if the girl isn’t feeling it that’s fine. But to expect to still get paid and offer nothing in return. Sometimes, this would be in the form of “I can date anyone I want and I’d never go on an online site to date.” Well, nobody is disagreeing with that, but just because you met someone online doesn’t mean it ‘can’t happen’. I think in these cases girls just wanted charitable hand outs and were overly focused on their short-term $ problems vs. being open to the bigger purpose. Girls got paid. Never got laid.
Zero Effort Girls
This happened a couple of times. Always tired. Never wanted to go out. Always had an excuse. 5-star steakhouse dinner planned? Pick up girl wearing sweatpants and t-shirt. Go out a few times – connect. Always some excuse to not want to stay over or do anything that was more akin to a ‘dating relationship’. “Oh I have to work early in the morning.” Girls mostly got paid. Never got laid.
Crazies
No different than real dating. On the surface, these worked out ‘ok’ but you always learn something about someone– never had any completely awful experiences, but I don’t associate with people that threaten to break things, start yelling obscenities at you for no reason. Girl got paid. Got laid.
Real Deal
Of all of the people emailed with, met one that I felt really embodied what I felt a SB/SD situation is all about. I guess all you need is one anyway. Always made time. When she couldn’t, she’d counter with an alternative. Sometimes, we saw each other twice a week; other times, once over several weeks. We’d do a lot of things from wild and crazy nights to hanging by the pool. We never questioned why ‘we couldn’t meet up’ as often – we just enjoyed time when we got together. Everyone is busy. My costs – lots of awesome nights out – some pricey, some not so pricey; a handful of killer shoes purchased; help with bills. Girl got paid. Got laid.

@NC Gent I know this response is a bit late, but I would suggest having a Skype date before meeting. I live in ND of all places and frankly, I rely on it because I have almost always traveled to see SD’s.

Hahahaha only a female mind can come up with shit like that.

Comparison would be a mn showing $100 bills in his profile photos and asking for a free platonic date.

@McDreamy Honey I’m 35, married and @ 5’6″ 168pds, I’m BBW. I thought you knew that. Lol. But I know how to dress, act, and style my natural hair. For some reason my face screams cute and innocent which I’m not. But what I don’t have in regards to a perfect body I compensate by a very enthusiastic bed partner open to pretty much everything. And when I look you in the eyes as I blow you and you cum down my throat, your toes will curl and your body will shiver.

I’m not slender and never will be.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Josh – another new profile in my search “Moderate” expectations…pics show a nice dress, casual outfit, “headshot” with what appears to be bra straps on shoulders, then, backside in mirror with bra and pulling panties off…text says not interested in sexual relationship…PLEASE…if there’s no sex on the table from the beginning, there’s no reason for that type of pic!

@Josh – that’s why I would never stop for someone on the side of the road…haven’t you ever watched shows like “Criminal Minds”, that’s when you end up as chili for the masses!

Joshsays:

Not that I am out to scam anyone, and that men have the market cornered on scam.

Most people, men or women, fall for scam because they want something for nothing, or something for very little.

Women scam men on a daily basis. You are driving along and see a young woman with cleavage standing beside her car with a flat tire. If your dick gets hard just with the sight of cleavage, you are fucked.

Just put yourself in any situation where a cleavage, ass, or Sharon Stone is involved and you are being scammed.

Your alpha, beta, theta, gamma, sigma mind might convince you otherwise, BUT the truth is that you are being scammed with impunity.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Michael – be careful “some $$” can mean very different things to a woman…

Michael1125says:

Nadine says:
February 25, 2015 at 11:17 am
Allowance? I meet some guys here and no one gave me an allowance, they treated me like a CHEAP B*TCH! Just gave some $$ for a meeting, even if I was traveling with them for a few days…. Every escort agency out there would treat their girls better than this site!

Nadine if you are still around, send me your profile ID,

I’m looking for someone to meet me in Vegas!

@dollfacesays:

@Josh oh man. I actually just recently deleted my profile.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Josh – that’s right…I was disappointed in her comparison at that time..as I still am…

I also don’t have MUCH sympathy for the SBs that talk about how much they can get for as little intimacy/time/etc…you’re exactly right…an SB who follows the instagram or tumblr of the “flashy” SBs with bundles of $100s, $50s, $20s (which, by the way, how is a bundle of $20s worth bragging about? and why would a SD really ASK for a bundle f $20s?)…

These two types of people are best suited for each other…the douchebag PUA SD with the “flashy” SB…just wish they’d leave us alone on SA so we can get to some “REAL” Sugar!

If I remember correctly the whole reason for @Elaine’s alleged “departure” from this blog was that she was “disgusted” as to what was going on in the sugar space.

It was not like those guys were scumbags but YOU blog SDs were swell. It was like “the blog SDs were behaving like those scumbags so I am out”.

ErikTheRedsays:

“Why, of course, the people don’t want war. Why would some poor slob on a farm want to risk his life in a war when the best that he can get out of it is to come back to his farm in one piece? Naturally, the common people don’t want war . . . That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy or a fascist dictatorship or a Parliament or a Communist dictatorship. . . Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country.”

— name to be revealed.

Now that Churchill and Hitler are mentioned, Bibi’s speech does remind one of them both: great rhetoricians skilled at punching the emotional points of the audience but deliver very little in terms of substance or new ideas. Both of them were disasters to the people/countries that they led. Hitler destroyed Germany by waging WWII. Churchill destroyed the British Empire by mishandling diplomacy with Turkey in WWI causing Russian collapse, then waging WWII way beyond British means; all Churchill delivered to the British people was “blood, sweat and toil.” “Victory” at the highest cost possible.

Chamberlain deserved credit for cheating Hitler out of a war in 1938. The British Chain Link radar early warning system was not finished until the Spring of 1940. If the war had started a year earlier in the absence of Munich Agreement, Luftwaffe would have won the air battle over Britain, which would have been invaded with Panzer divisions flush with high morale from their recent victory in France and Lower Countries. Churchill’s “we will fight in the streets streets and hills” speech would have promised little more than mass casualty for the civilian population just like the Jihadis did in Iraq; middle class Brits would not make for good jihadis.

For over a century before Churchill, Britain had final say on European politics, not by being the policeman of Europe but via Balance of Power. That’s how a nation can maximize its influence on the world at minimal cost; that’s also how a country can have a decisive voice in the world without itself being corrupted by an over-sized government that enslaves its own people.

In today’s world, we will face several potential challenges due to simple demographics: the Muslims, the Russians, the Chinese, the Indians, and perhaps even the sub-saharan Africans someday. If we have to fight every one of those emerging powers, we’d be doomed to either military defeat or the destruction of republic through costly “victories.”

Enemy of an enemy is of course an ally, even if only temporarily. The Western Allies would have zero chance of winning WWII if Britain and France had declared war on the USSR after Stalin invaded Poland two weeks after Hitler did. In the coming genocidal war between the Sunnis and Shiites, the Persians are likely to be our allies, just like they historically were due to simple geography: it was the Persians who set free the Jews kidnapped by Nebuchadnezzar after the burning of the First Temple. Likewise, the success/failure of the Crusader Kingdom in the 12-13th century depended on borrowing military capacity from powers further east like the Mongols that could counter-balance the surrounding powers.

Good leaders in a state that benefits its own people do not usually have unrestrained power; they ought to be humble servants that have to compromise all the time. “Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men.” — Lord Acton

BTW, the quote at the beginning of this comment was from Herman Goering, given at the Neuremburg Trials, shortly before he was setenced to death by hanging.

To bring the topic back to the sugar world 😉 playing the “alpha” and chest thumping is best reserved to the bedroom and mutually-willing exchanges in the business world, not the coercive political world; admiring a political Alpha is an extremely beta and/or female trait: it’s tantamount to welcoming self-enslavement. Perhaps fun in the role-playing bedroom, but coercion is much less fun in the real world and ultimately corrupting.

Exactly where Brandon Wade is taking it to, through his cheesy ads, projecting SDs as desperate idiots, and then egging SBs on through emails to demand more from the idiots.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@gentleman – I don’t remember, but someone shared (@Josh can probably reference it quickly) disgust at it…I checked it out and it was really how to “play” the women on sites like SA to pump and dump with as little out of pocket as possible. It was specifically targeting the NO budget “SD”, X-box loser guys on how to game the 8-10 coed since they were only being approached by the 70+, 400lb, fugly SDs on sites like SA…use younger age as advantage, fuck and run…

Should have used skype!

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Southern – at least the two chickens and a goat are thinking about future eating possibilities hahaha

gentleman soulsays:

OnlineNewbieSD says:

@gentleman – the issue with THAT blog is that they are posing as the Significant SD category and then basically pump and dumping on them for as little as possible…they’re being douchebags and making it difficult for the “true” SDs…

What blog is it ? Truth and honesty is critical for sure . Unfortunately there are scammers everywhere ,including on SA .

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

Just saw a profile (on home page for me as a Newest Member)…she wanted to exchange nude pics for concert tickets….REALLY????

Michael1125says:

Very rarely has anyone “blown up” at me

The two times this occurred it was a case of an “entitled” lady with an attitude explaining why I HAD to understand that she deserved a chance despite being hefty, uneducated, 3 kids by two loser exes, etc…

I think one of those ladies expected things to remain platonic for several months as well!

@ Rebecca – There will always be flakes and frauds on both sides . Trust but verify works both ways.

Joshsays:

@flyR

At your age, before you kick the bucket, you should indeed enjoy your “special time in sugarland even more.”

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@gentleman – the issue with THAT blog is that they are posing as the Significant SD category and then basically pump and dumping on them for as little as possible…they’re being douchebags and making it difficult for the “true” SDs…

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Michael – your struggles are a recurring issue with SA…did you get “blown up” by any of your polite dismissals?

I used the polite dismissal once and the bitch went OFF on me in a return message…I quit sending polite dismissals and just started blocking the profiles and deleting the messages if they are so far out of the “desirable” category…

gentleman soulsays:

@Politics

No room in the sugar bowl for politics or religion. Aren’t we all supposed to be talking about sex and money ?

ss1959 says:

Whether one agrees or disagrees with Benyamin isn’t the point. He never should have spoken to Congress without the President’s invitation, or at least approval, on basic principal. That is the crux of the matter regardless of what side of the aisle you sit. We are Americans ,not Israeli proxies. Anyone ever wonder why the Muslim world hates America ?

Rebecca says:

I stumbled upon another forum. It is a bunch of men talking about how they’re “banging” girls and scamming them into thinking they are a SD. They pride themselves on getting girls who are “8 and 9’s” on the hotness scale and only paid for their cheap drinks. If they do pay, it is $50-$200, tops.

Don’t knock it -these guys are SDs as well. You might view yourselves as the “Mercedes” class of SB ,but there is room for Kia too . $200/visit will buy a lot of formula and diapers -no ?

flyRsays:

@Fun Dude – Weapons?

Back in the 80’s when Hillary was explaining to the masses that the USSR was going to be around forever (and that we needed to accommodate them) a couple of sage guys wrote “The Great Reckoning” which very accurately predicted the demise of the Soviet Union. When it occurred they updated the book with a large new section Mohammed replaces Marx, very accurately predicting the rise of militant Muslim fundamentalists.

The masses with their noses in People magazine, geographically illiterate and historically challenged are generally ignorant of the rapid rise in power of the radicals from central Africa to and across the Chinese border. It extends up into Europe.

The rapidly deteriorating situation in Afghanistan poses a grave threat to Pakistan where the most radical elements of the Taliban and other radical forces are very strong. Pakistan has had nuclear weapons for 25+ years.

The American left played a major role in the destabilization of the middleeast going back to the overthrow of the Shah of Iran – the most moderate leader in the region and a great friend of the US and continuing through the Arab Spring and overthrow of the governments in Egypt, Syria, Libya, all of which have gone militant radical and now threaten Iraq.

Obama’s been largely successful in keeping the mainstream press under control. The majors refused to cover yesterday’s speech by the Israeli prime minister. There’s been a vast purge of our most senior military officers who are not Obama supporters. As the finally released Hillary emails demonstrate, the administration knew from the first moments that the Benghazi attack was not anything but an assault by radical Muslims. The assertion that a movie which nobody had seen was the cause was a fabrication. Not surprisingly three of the senior military commanders in the region Army , Air Force and Navy were relieved of duty in order to silence them. The President, having dismissed ISIS as the junior varsity now refuses to even speak the word ISIS. Fort Hood was workplace violence according to the President.

Against this backdrop the President is negotiating with the Iranians, something he represented he would have completed withing months of his arrival at the White House. The news from yesterday should not have been that 25% of the democrats refused to attend but rather that almost 90% the total members did, in effect voting no confidence in the President who chose to make attendance a measure of his support. He could have welcomed the PM, but he chose to make it a personal contest and lost BIG.

What outraged Obama the most was not the content of the Israeli PM’s presentation but the fact that the nation was reminded of the difference between the arrogant, teleprompter driven president and real leadership. It was a repeat of his embarrassment a few months ago when Dr Ben Carson spoke at the National Prayer breakfast with Obama writhing in the background.

I have an older neighbor who served in both Iraq wars and several undeclared wars and suffers from both physical injuries and PTSD. Despite multiple overnight trips over the past year to the regional VA headquarters he has not been assigned a primary physician, the essential first step in getting help. Yet each of the illegals who gets a “temporary” card thanks to Obama will be elgible for up to $30,0000 IN CASH when they get a social security number. That will of course discourage the next wave of illegals.

I’m not a Zionist or even a jew, just a saddened and worried American. Sugar related – yes – It makes me appreciate my special time in sugarland even more……………

Joshsays:

@ss1959

If you ask psychologists, they will tell you that “supposed to” is a very dangerous phrase, which has near perfect tract record of creating frustration in the psyche of the utterer unless the utterer carries a stick and is proficient in its effective use. 😉

Joshsays:

@AmusedSD

My comment was on the content of the PM speech and not why he made such speech at the Congress.
Apparently enough of the members of the Congress were responding positively to him. And your comments are just a royal waste of precious bit and bytes.

Joshsays:

@Michael

Isn’t it interesting how these women expect their end of the expectations met with precision and their end of the bargain is baesed on chemistry.

One of the SB, 35 year-old, I contacted with my “no allowance” offer went progressively nuclear and told me never to contact her again.

The other one, listed as 32 but looks 42, who initially agreed to meet is now trying to sneak in allowance through other means. She claims that she does not have nice clothes to come to the date. So I need to buy her a dress and shoes for her to meet me.

Michael1125says:

Wow, does no one ever sleep here??

Along the allowance discussion…

I received 3 msgs on SA yesterday afternoon… (Yay!)

3/3 were obese, 2/3 were married (Not yay……)

Strangely enough, all of the messages were fairly explicit about the amount of allowance they felt they were worth (I think too many of them are watching the SA “how to” videos on youtube!)

All right, all of the ladies were politely told that perhaps we wouldn’t be a good fit (this polite routine is REALLY getting old.)

Later last night, I received a fourth message and thought YES Keo and Melissa have tracked me down. Life is Good!

Unfortunately no

This lady was 20, in college, fit, ebony, and cute. I normally don’t waste time on SB’s that young but thought why not. I’ll be in town this weekend, I just bought a new car, let’s meet.

(Keep in mind this polite routine is getting to be a pain. I’ve never had a POT ask me for money to meet, but I have always given these ladies a small gift in cash and gift cards. As a side note, I used to always give cards to a spa which was near the ladies home, but Panera is apparently more popular! Does every woman on the planet love Panera?)

This young lady, however, was very detailed on the MINIMUM amount of allowance, the MINIMUM amount of shopping, and the EXPECTED amount of money she would receive at our first meeting.

Great, there is a reason I tend to ignore college SB’s…

No more “Mr. Nice Michael!”

I was happy to provide her with a MINIMUM number of times per month she would see me, a DETAILED list of “fun” activities in which we would engage, and specs of the girlfriend I expected her to bring along at least twice per month…

Right now, there is a young lady in the Midwest complaining to her friends about all the losers on this site.

This time it’s my fault!

I try to be a gentleman, some days I succeed more than others!

Next….

ss1959says:

Whether one agrees or disagrees with Benyamin isn’t the point. He never should have spoken to Congress without the President’s invitation, or at least approval, on basic principal. The Executive Branch is responsible for foreign policy, and discourse with the leader of a foreign country should go through that channel. The idea that a foreign government is intervening in internal American policy decisions should raise the hackles of everyone in government. I find it sad that partisanship is gone so far that this is being overlooked.

I grew up with 2 brothers and as kids we fought amongst ourselves constantly, but if the neighbor kids attacked one of us they had to deal with all of us. We were united to those outside the family. And that’s how our government is supposed to work as well.

Netanyahu depends on the far-right minority in Israel, the fundamentalist Jews who believe God gave them the land between the Jordan and the sea and are determined to turn that land into a pure Jewish state, to maintain his ruling coalition. They have an influence that far outweighs their numbers because they have a single-minded agenda. It’s sort of like the influence the Cubans in Miami have on presidential elections here.

And on a practical level, Netanyahu’s bull in a china shop approach to politics is a threat to Israel. Israel depends on the protection they get from the US in the UN Security Council. We routinely veto votes to recognize the Palestinian State, to charge Israel with war crimes, etc. And the US representative to the UN serves at the pleasure of the President. Pissing off the administration is a risky move for an Israeli Prime Minister.

Everyone knows a nuclear Iran is a threat. But Netanyahu’s chest-thumping does nothing but limit options and reduce maneuvering room for both the Israelis and the Americans.

{{https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_F48oaOskI}}

FunDudesays:

There are two methods that are being employed: The “soft” jihad and the “hard” jihad.

The less militant ones understand that being “overly militant” when they are still in the minority can lead to significant reprisals. Already in Germany, there are large demonstrations against Islamics. Their methodology is just simple demographics to take over.

The less militant method is probably the smarter idea. If they overreach with attacks before they have a significant demographic base, they could risk being thrown out of their respective Western nations.

FunDudesays:

@Amused

Please explain how 1.6 billion Muslims would “destroy the world” without a strong military apparatus?

9/11 happened because it was a sneak attack, the best attack they could basically pull off.

Since that period of time, there are many CIA, NSA, etc watching jihadi networks and basically killing many of them with drones. To pull off attacks, they would need supplies, logistical support, etc.

How can they do that easily in America? They are trying, don’t worry.

In Europe, there have been one to two man “teams” attacking various countries. France just had Charlie Hebdo offices shot up with two gunmen, Belgium just arrested a bunch of jihadis, Canada had its parliament shot up by a lone Islamic, Russia had plenty of terrorist attacks, Spain had terrorist attacks, England, etc.

The Muslim world is currently occupied in a civil war between Sunnis and Shias throughout the Middle East.

If you ever watch the ISIS beheading videos, they basically said they will “conquer Rome” and “fly the black flag over the White House”.

Iran considers America the “Great Satan” and just blew up a mock US aircraft carrier.

To pretend this isn’t the reality is hiding your head like Chamberlain during WW2. The analogy is 100% appropriate.

The only difference is that:

1) Sunnis and Shias are currently locked in a civil war
2) Most Islamic countries militaries are crap and can’t do much. Iran is trying to rectify this through a nuke.

They will win the long war through demographics though. Qadaffi talked about how the Muslims will take over Europe through demographics.

They are playing the long game.

Can the feminist Western world survive? I am skeptical. No feminist society has survived long term in recorded history.

AmusedSDsays:

@Josh
“You told us ealier that you were an attorney as well. I am sure you have a PhD is neuroscience as well, which you will reveal at the right time? :)”

Yes, 20 years as a trial lawyer. The only other skills I have is in the tech world / programming.
No other formal education. I haven’t done anything than those three things.

@FunDude
Yes, we must start a war to keep the peace. We must start a war to prevent war. Just what we need, another endless war in the Middle East. You’re pretty free and easy with other people’s blood.

When you get off your favorite topics, it seems like you get your logic out of a box of crackerjacks. Saying that 1.6 billion Muslims haven’t blown up the world because they have no military abilities. 9/11 happened with box cutters. We’re supposedly worried about Muslims because they’ll take a few sticks of dynamite strapped to them, run into a crowd and blow themselves up. It’s called asynchronous warfare. They don’t *need* military ability to create havoc.

Congratulations on your WWII knowledge of history. Neville Chamberlin, Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler are historical figures. But to claim that Benjamin Netanyahu is playing the role of Winston Churchill is about as far-fetched as saying Iran is playing the role of Germany and Hitler.

Sure, there are 1.6 billion of them. But they are mostly situated in poor societies that have absolutely NO MILITARY ABILITY. They have no ability to turn the world into shit YET.

Bibi is warning that once “radical Islam gets the nuclear bomb” all BETS are off. He is correct in that assessment.

@dollfacesays:

This is the Brazilian and Caribbean girl that came here a while ago to ask for advice on my profile. I just wanted to thank all you that helped me. Since then I’ve had numerous compliments on my profile. I’ve began talking to a very successful man (yup did my research) who absolutely adores me and I him.

He’s exactly the kind of man I joined the site to find and if it weren’t for all of the help I received from you guys I don’t know If I would have met him. After I experienced something traumatic he was there to offer me emotional support. I feel like after kissing a dozen frogs I finally found my prince!

Thank you guys a ton!

Thank

Promisesays:

If I could get work done then I would get an umbilicoplasty, and see if they can fix my finger tip.

FatB'StardSA Proxysays:

StruggleIsReal says:
March 3, 2015 at 3:15 pm

“For instance, one of the prettiest girls I know is an absolute freak of nature in regards to her family’s genetics. She somehow ended up with the best of all their genetics. The rest of them… Ummmm well they didn’t get as lucky… Like not nearly as lucky by a million miles. I would not want to reproduce with her for this reason.”

@Blog SD’s

“I would not want to reproduce with her for this reason.”

I told you guys she is really a dude! Don’t worry though, jerking off while reading “her” posts and fantasizing about “her” gravatar does not make you gay…

@ Melissa et al – The SB arrives with one of two attitudes – How soon do I want a great orgasm or how soon do I want to leave. It’s the seldom discussed watershed in sugar relationships .

ss1959says:

Bibi thumped his chest and showed everybody how “alpha” he is, and all to play up to the right-wing religious wing-nut faction of Israeli Judaism. If that’s what it means to be alpha, we need fewer alpha males in the world.

I like cake:)

@AmusedSD..***stands up and claps loudly**

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Amused
Good stuff.

AmusedSDsays:

@Josh
Yes, I understand the threat of Muslims. I’m retired military, an Arabic linguist and a subject matter expert on Middle Eastern Affairs. I also taught interrogation for the Army for a number of years.

There are 1.6 billion Muslims in the world. About 22% of the world’s population is Muslim. If it was muslims themselves that was the problem, our planet would already be an uninhabitable flaming bag of poop.

@Josh
You thought Netanyahu gave an excellent speech, but don’t give a shit about politics?

You don’t care that the only purpose of the speech was to help his re-election chances and to pull us into fighting his war (that neither the American people, nor Israeli’s want) for him?

@Josh
“Too big of an issue to worry about or have any influence on, other than frustrating myself unnecessarily.”

Ah Honey, we don’t want you frustrated unnecessarily. There are plenty of folks here that can do that for you… pick a topic. LOL

Joshsays:

@Amused,

I don’t give a shit about world politics or local variety for that matter. Too big of an issue to worry about or have any influence on, other than frustrating myself unnecessarily.

However people don’t understand the threat they are facing from these radical Muslims; shia or sunni. These people are nutcases and have global aspirations. While the West loses population, they are breeding like rabbits and don’t have any qualms about turning their children into human bombs for the sake of Allah.

It was very kind of Netanyahu to use our internal politics two weeks from his election to bolster his chances in a tight race.

@FunDude &Josh… but wasn’t it rude of him to give the speech?

Rebeccasays:

I stumbled upon another forum. It is a bunch of men talking about how they’re “banging” girls and scamming them into thinking they are a SD. They pride themselves on getting girls who are “8 and 9’s” on the hotness scale and only paid for their cheap drinks. If they do pay, it is $50-$200, tops. They describe the women as having tattoos and piercings all over. The women say they hope to get enough money to buy their child’s formula.. Charming. Super models they are getting, obviously.

I found one the guy’s profile who posts a lot on that site. He gets ~all these women~ for free, but lists substantial on his profile.. Judging by his photos, if he came up to me in person, I’d worry he was a serial killer.

So women out there, if you want an actual arrangement, don’t meet guys at seedy bars or go back to his hotel..

Lol @Melissa looks like it

Melissasays:

@Keo Ah I see whats happening here, @Michael1125 wants to eat his cake and have it too

StruggleIsRealsays:

@LadyS
I prefer your nose to her pre-nose job nose. I think she was lovely before and also after. Just had to make that exception as there was a definite difference in her photos.

@Southern
Aging and child-bearing are another thing entirely. I’m talking about original features etc.
Reconstruction after childbirth etc is only fair and any man who loves his woman would be more than happy to provide what he can in that regard.

SouthernSBsays:

If I were to get plastic surgery I would get everything lifted from my knees to my boobs and I would get back the nose I had when I was 14 years old. You nose and your ears are the only things on your body that keeps growing throughout your whole life. Ewww…

wish I could get a plastic surgery to look like the ‘before’ Olga…I would totally take her pre nose look over mine any day….hehe :-p

StruggleIsRealsays:

@flyR
GREAT post (about SBs v. escorts)! Agree completely.

@ss
Sounds like you’ve got it right! And yeah you’re right, there are a few who post here who are so bitter. It sucks for the newbies who come here and are confronted with that onslaught. There’s a lot of good info and positivity that gets either lost in the mire or simply just goes away for obvious reasons.

@LadyS
Agree with your post as well.

Olga… Post nose job, yeah totally hot. I’m picky that way though. I like genetics. I see future babies and I want to give them every single advantage, as far as I can help it, if I ever have them. It’s hard for me to appreciate surgically altered parts for this reason. Not that I judge others for having had them, but a perfect 10 to me would have been born that way and his/her family would also be quite good looking and at least have various levels of intelligence. For instance, one of the prettiest girls I know is an absolute freak of nature in regards to her family’s genetics. She somehow ended up with the best of all their genetics. The rest of them… Ummmm well they didn’t get as lucky… Like not nearly as lucky by a million miles. I would not want to reproduce with her for this reason. Yeah I’m a shrewd bitch. Also I want an amazingly kind heart, genius brain, self-awareness, height, highly evolved individual. Otherwise to me there is no point.
Honestly my SD is the only man I have ever been able to see myself reproducing with. He says the same of me. We won’t anytime soon, if at all, but damn it’s a turn on and a struggle at the same time.

@Promise those Ladies are the business! I have mad respect for them and wish I’d done this sugaring sh*t sooner…like 10 yrs ago!

cryptic anomalysays:

1/ Actually know what you want and why you are here. Are you a professional hooker or wannabe part time hooker? If that is the case than you are in the wrong place and should find work elsewhere.

2/ What do you want? Don’t make us play stupid guessing games, don’t be all coy and say things like “If you have to ask then you can’t afford it” that just makes you come across as an annoying Princess and you get nothing or you get used if the SD is the type who does that. If you want the high life and don’t care about actual money but just want gifts and nice dates, then say that, if you want an allowance then say that! Have some idea of what you want.

3/ Think about what you are willing to offer. I have seen many profiles on here from SB’s asking for Substantial allowances who then also make it clear that they do not want to offer anything substantial themselves. You do realize you are one of many on here and SB’s outnumber SD’s right? Be realistic about what you are offering and what that is really worth. Keep in mind that brothels are legal in some countries and that often it is cheaper and easier for us to go to one.

4/ Don’t be all “Me, me, me” we get it, we know why you’re here and what you want. Most of us though also want some warmth, something genuine even on a part time basis. Again, we could go to a brothel, strip club.

Yes there are honorable wives out there, but for the most part wife is a whore who can, and does, fuck you REAL GOOD. But unfortunately its not the kind of fucking you look forward to or enjoy.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

I think the difference between an escort and a hooker is location…hooker is a working girl, on the streets…escort is a more marketing savvy woman who markets to a different audience (although they could choose the lower end of the response pool just to make some cash)…

A whore will fuck anyone for nothing, just ask and she’ll deliver…

A slut will fuck many people, some for something, some for nothing…it’s about quantity, not quality or remuneration…it can also be used as an adjective like “slutty wife” for a woman who dresses like she will fuck for quantity…

a nude model is a career choice and could involve being a slut (like the casting couch experiences, fucking for the chance at future work) or a whore (fucking everyone because you love to fuck, without consideration for future opportunities)…nude modeling has NOTHING to do with the Sugar Bowl, where these other titles do have an impact on the Sugar Bowl…

A SB can fall victim to being classified into the above categories…as a hooker because she bolts out of the room even before the SD finishes his orgasm so she can get on with whatever is going on in her life (I’ve had one of those)…as an escort because she doesn’t watch the clock, but doesn’t really have any connection to the SD outside of their meetings…as a whore if she lets things go too long without receiving something to benefit her in return for her sexual prowess…as a slut if she is in the Sugar Bowl too long, or likes to continue to look for the next best SD by sampling the menu…

In my opinion the “perfect” SB knows how to balance the sex with the conversation, the sultry with the discreet, the tease with the play…the fun with the positive energy!

All women have sex with men for money. Wives, girlfriends, SB, Escorts, Prostitutes. All the same, different name.

Melissasays:

@keo lol I’m just trying to help 😉

FlyBoysays:

*pray not prey lol

FlyBoysays:

I wasn’t commenting on women’s sexual behavior, I was commenting on your comment.

You are the one who asserted that any women claiming that having sex with her is valuable and therefore she deserves consideration is a .. Whore. In other words, a woman should never consider sex as a valuable entity that can be traded (lifetime commitment, financial security, … etc) lest she falls of the moral wagon.

Verily, this is a deranged and irrational view. So, prey tell, what motivates it?

4. Girlfriend = Dumb whoring. Equivalent to a car dealer allowing a customer to test drive a brand new car for a year in the hopes that he will buy it.

5. The mother of the bastard (aka single mom) = Retarded whoring. No more needs to be said.

I don’t what happened to the equal signs lol

FlyBoysays:

All women who have sex outside the walls of matrimony are whores!

The taboos were developed by human society through the ages to eliminate sexual promiscuity. (If you want to know why they didn’t want sexual promiscuity, you can read Professor JD Uwins magnum opus “Sex and Culture” where he shows how sexual promiscuity always leads to moral anarchy and the ***Demise*** of society. This has been true through out history and is still true today.)

Having said this, traditional society did not insist on marriage the way religious folks do. What it insisted on is that any sexual relationship must have a sane economic model associated with it. This naturally produced three types of relationship:

1. Marriage.
2. Prostitution.
3. Pseudo marriage. Where an upper classman takes a lifelong mistress who is a desirable woman albeit from an undesirable socioeconomic level. Note, a mistress is not a courtesan, who is a high class prostitute.

So how should we interpret these age old truths in our era. Simple:

1. Marriage Not whoring.

2. Sugar Smart whoring.

3. Prostitution Sometimes Good, others Bad. Depends on the whore.

4. Girlfriend Dumb whoring. Equivalent to a car dealer allowing a customer to test drive a brand new car for a year in the hopes that he will buy it.

5. The mother of the bastard (aka single mom) Retarded whoring. No more needs to be said.

I hope this will help the SBs to calm the hamster when it starts spinning the wheel about the nature and morality of sugar.

Smarter women choose better combinations. ”

You left out a big penis, hehe :-p

ss1959says:

There seems to be so many angry people here! Goodness people, this is Sugar. Sweet and delicious Sugar. This is supposed to be fun.

I’ve had a few SB’s. Some arrangements have worked out long term; some haven’t. They’ve all (well, almost all) been fun. Most of them are still friends. I had real relationships with all of them; some deeper than others.

My current SB is the best one yet. Her kink complements mine wondrously. We text daily. We go on dates. Sometimes we meet for a quick breakfast or lunch. Sometimes we spend days locked away in a hotel room. We’re nice to each other. We enjoy each other. It’s not freaking rocket science.

LadyScarlettsays:

“Rather than argue what sugar should be it’s probably more productive to talk about what it can be. Not in a theoretical manner but in reality. Sadly on the blog aggressive, mass posting attacks are directed at those who are involved in successful, mutually beneficial relationships based on honesty and shared respect.”

Yes.

“For those who arrived here recently it’s important to understand that many successful SB’s have left in disgust with the strident attacks, rentless, aggressive posters our own Jihadists”

Ermm….yes, again.

I have only had sex with one man in the past seven months, and have had a couple of arrangements that did not involve actual sex. If your company or entertainment for your SD is more important than the actual act of sex, then that is another difference between escorting and being an SB.

If your comparative advantage is only the actual act of sex itself, then you will probably not be a successful sugar baby because there is so much more involved than that….also, a good sugar baby will want to spend as much time as she can with her sugar daddy, not be eager to leave him as quickly as possible, in my opinion.

I’ve never seen a sugar baby as an escort, but like they’ve mentioned earlier guess it depends on your approach to sugar and how you conduct yourself…

Nope Kenna is a fiancee with an allowance and will be a wife an allowance.

24says:

“If a women is exchanging her time and body with the requirement or anticipation of money or material gain she is, in fact, an escort.”

What if I am nude model? Am I an escort? What if I sleep with my date after they bought me dinner and drinks? Ask the average woman if they’d be disappointed if the man didn’t pick up the tab on the first date. Majority would be turned off and possibly not see him again. Are they hookers? Is the man buying an escort because he slept with a girl after paying for her dinner and drinks? Are stay at home mothers escorts since they spend their spouse’s money?

SB is not escorting, in my eyes. If you’re juggling 10 different men and have no emotional connection to them, then you’re an escort. Kenna got a ring on her finger, but is still accepting his funding. Is she an escort with a ring?

@McDreamy okay when I get there I’ll be in contact. Lol

flyRsays:

Personally I think the difference between the traditional hooker and sugar is pretty vast .

The hooker is only looking for an overwhelming reason not to see someone and generally deals in quantity. On the other side there’s more wisdom from the former Clinton senior adviser , Dick Morris. When an outraged female reporter sternly asked Morris if it was true that he paid a hooker $300 to have sex with him Morris set her straight. “Mam I did NOT pay her $300 to her to have sex with me; I paid her $300 to leave when I was done.” It is doubtful if Morris or 95% of other hooker clients have a substantial interest in their sexual pleasure, their welfare , their future or even enjoying their company past completion.

I realize that a number of my SD brothers occupy a pleasure space close to that of Dick Morris, that on completion the guilt and self disgust lead to sending the “SB” into the night, satisfied only with the monetary reward.

Rather than jumping to look at the SB, let’s look at contemporary dating. On the college campus sex is pretty much an expectation after one or two dates and often half way through the first date. If she’s lucky she’s been rewarded with a couple quarter pounders with cheese and bottom shelf wine. Concern for her wellbeing is often limited to an assurance of no chipped teeth. Her sisters in Hollywood and the Sunset Strip understand that preferred admission to the popular clubs , invitations to the Playboy Mansion or many parties is implicitly conditioned on sex on demand for the privilege. There’s a pretty limited subgroup of metrosexuals who are interested in serious dating without sex… Today’s typical college junior has oral skills equivalent to those of the pre Deep Throat era porn stars. In short sex is a pretty common component of relationships among unmarried adults.

Yes there’s a substantial minority of SD’s who are really just looking for lower cost hookers with a socially acceptable gloss. Like Morris their interest is pretty much limited to personal gratification and immediate separation. There’s nothing fundamentally wrong with this as long as both understand what the relationship is about. SB’s operating in this space need to understand the concept of Caveat Emptor. They also need to understand that operating in this area is often about power, guilt, dark fantasies.

Rather than argue what sugar should be it’s probably more productive to talk about what it can be. Not in a theoretical manner but in reality. Sadly on the blog aggressive, mass posting attacks are directed at those who are involved in successful, mutually beneficial relationships based on honesty and shared respect.

For the SB the relationship CAN provide a sound source cash, hopefully for productive uses that will accelerate her path toward her goals. A relationship where when she walks in the door she knows she will leave with a smile on her face because sexually she is treated with more respect than that given to her sisters by their “normal” dating partners. For the SB it’s an opportunity to experience growth opportunities, have someone who genuinely cares about her welfare. To get this she needs to discriminate between those looking only for a sperm dumpster into which to disperse their anger and feelings of inadequacy, the fraudsters and the thugs.

No this does not mean that the SD is not entitled to bring his game and to engage in high order salesmanship. It does suggest that we should applaud honest relationships.

For those who arrived here recently it’s important to understand that many successful SB’s have left in disgust with the strident attacks, rentless, aggressive posters our own Jihadists

@Struggle I’m great! I should be packing but I’m finding every other thing to do but pack, haha!

Michael1125says:

@keo

We can see…

As long as you own that dress!

a latin opinionsays:

@struggles can’t have said better! That’s the point, why to call other peoples names? If we are all being part of the same game.

A lot of differences but when the ones who are/were in here, call other women scorts or prostitutes in shaming way is funny. Instead I like the approach that I have seen in here in wich some of the bloggers try to help them out and show them a better way.

@McDreamy if I lose like 20 pds… I can be in the running?

SouthernSBsays:

@Josh-None of it makes sense, that’s the problem. It isn’t just less than appropriate men, it’s all kinds of excitement for the rush and the thrill. Fast cars, watching scary movies, swimming at the deep end of the pool, roller coasters, wanting to try bungee jumping or sky diving, anything to get my heart pumping and those butterflies going in my stomach. It might make me sound like a drama queen but that isn’t true, I hate drama but I love excitement. For the first time in my life I’m not living in a fantasy land, I finally know what the problem is and I know I have to avoid it.

@Michael..What type of shape do you like Hair -Natural, weave, Tall or short. I might can work something out for you. Hehe

Joshsays:

It seems that @Michael1125 is being liked by the SBs. So I need to deproxy him.

LadyScarlettsays:

@Josh, knew I should not have mentioned the ‘M’ word 😉

Divorce or death only results in a big payday if the man had means and left it to her, or has means to support…Being married for a short time does not result in much of a payoff like it used to, and depends…have a friend who pays alimony to her ex husband…yeah, it happens.

StruggleIsRealsays:

@LadyS
Good points.
It really is just all perspective and how cynical someone is/ wants to be, and how one conducts oneself in his/her own endeavors. For me, I can say that absolutely without a doubt, how I conduct myself and my situation is different than an escort does. I honestly don’t look down at all on escorts though and have never been one to thumb my nose at them, either here on the blog or in life. In fact, isn’t @Lainey the one usually calling out girls on here for being escorts? I’m confused.

“My problem wasn’t that I was wasting my life on X-Box players, my problem was I was just looking for the excitement and adrenaline rush that dating less than appropriate guys would always give me.”

Choose which part of the above sentence makes sense in the fantasyland you live in. 😉

LadyScarlettsays:

I do not agree in the absolute generalization that escort=SB. That is too simplified, but also do not think that I am better than an escort. There are the high end escorts who make quite a lot of money(more than I will ever have done as an SB), but who still might see three or four different clients a week. While, another escort might see three of four clients a day…and even lower end escort might see more than three or four clients per day. Does the average mid-range escort pick and choose who her clients are? Or, as long as they pass screening tests they are good to go? To me, it is more about choosing that differentiates things…and numbers.

An SB might wait months or more to find the proper fit, so an SB certainly does not make as much as an escort in many situations, and it can be very time consuming to have many first meets, or screen a potential without actually finding a sugar daddy right away.

And then, there are the high end courtesans who devote their time to just a few benefactors of their choice. If one is going to call sugar babies the same as an escort, then I would like to think of a proper SB more equates to that of a true courtesan with a only one or two lovers that she has ‘chosen’ to be her benefactor(s). I view it all on a spectrum….

On the escort spectrum, I would think of the craigslist prostitute on one end, and the high end courtesan on the other end….Also, think of the Venetian courtesans from the 16th century who would oftentimes be more educated and live more lavishly than the upper class women of their time.

For sugar babies, I like to think of this on an even larger spectrum…on one end, you have the street walking prostitute addicted to a drug even, perhaps, and on the other end, you might have the trophy wife or wife who is taken care of by her husband….and, somewhere on that spectrum is the SB, or the woman with her generous ‘boyfriend’ who is taking care of her.

And then, within that spectrum, if you branch off, you have the SB or generous boyfriend spectrum….some of these ‘SBs’ treat the relationship more transactional and have a pay for play situation(and the men seek this as well, or talk the SB into doing p4p), then, on the other end of that spectrum, you have other SB relationships that are more likened to girlfriend and boyfriend, where the gentleman takes care of the lady because he wants to and she is a ‘kept’ woman. Or, another point farther on the spectrum is more likened to the Kenna story and her SD turned fiancée, where the relationship turned into something more permanent and long-term, such as marriage….

@Struggle I agree. Sex is very important to me

@Southern…Michael does sound dreamy. I will so forth call him McDreamy. Lol

SouthernSBsays:

Darn @Michel1125-if I were 30 lbs. lighter and 25 years younger I’d be more than willing to meet your demands. You are the perfect SD and I’m sure that you’d be able to spoil any SB within an inch of her life. As far as I’m concerned you aren’t even asking that much. If that’s all a SB is I’ve been doing that since I was of dating age (of course without the sex when I was a teenager), but like my mother always said, “Pearls to the sows.”
My problem wasn’t that I was wasting my life on X-Box players, my problem was I was just looking for the excitement and adrenaline rush that dating less than appropriate guys would always give me.

@Erik
Ah thanks! I feel like I am the lucky one though

ErikTheRedsays:

@SIsReal

Your SD is a lucky guy 😉

StruggleIsRealsays:

@Kenna
Hey girl, thanks! How are you feeling?

@LadyS
It was awesome! And freezing!

@Keo
Yes, holed up is right! We hardly left the room. Sex is a massive part of relationships for me. SD laughs because we never have any problems, except for when I pout because I don’t get enough of his cum or snuggles. And that’s a LOT, to be sure!

@Erik
Agreed!

ErikTheRedsays:

In all honesty, there should be no shame for a woman to secure help from a man for raising the 2.2 children that she is statistically likely to have (including the pre- and post- requirements and consequences on her brain and body), provided the terms are clearly communicated and mutually agreed upon.

ErikTheRedsays:

In that case, a wife is just an escort hoping to get life-time tenure but on average gets 4 years with severance pay. LOL. How cynical do we want to get?

IMHO, there is no point unnecessarily triggering slut-shaming defenses that many decent girls have. Let me tell you, those defense mechanisms are like mine fields, and can easily blow up a nascent relationship if you don’t tread carefully 😉

hmm well i’ll just agree to disagree. Sounds like someone played you & now your self respect is in the shitter. Buck up O’l pal. Next time dont act like a escort & he probably wont treat you like one.

– Understand this, SB = escort on retainer
SB is just a nice way of saying it to placate the person.

a latin opinionsays:

finally some rough true coming from a woman around here. Yes THERE is not difference, and is superrrr funny to see how SB jump to call others prostitutes when we are all/were playing the same game.

Is simple if you are not ok with exchanging money from sex/company/whatever you don’t put it there out front!.

I have seen women leaving the site because don’t feel comfortable with that and have seen woman who specifically state in their profiles that are using the site as an “on line dating site” than will not accept/want any money from the guy!

Laineysays:

*itd behoove

Laineysays:

@PureSin let me correct that because I WAS a SB at some point and have zero horror stories but its behoove women to stop down talking escorts when the are doing the EXACT same thing and again I’m talking about escorts not out right corner side prostitutes. Escorting is legal. Prostitution is not.

Laineysays:

Ladies, you can change the name but the game is still the same!

Laineysays:

Lol @PureSin you’re silly. I’m not in Sugar. I have an amazing BF that treats me like a queen but FACTS are FACTS. If a women is exchanging her time and body with the requirement or anticipation of money or material gain she is, in fact, an escort.

PureSinsays:

@lainey hmm well i’ll just agree to disagree. Sounds like someone played you & now your self respect is in the shitter. Buck up O’l pal. Next time dont act like a escort & he probably wont treat you like one.

Stop your horseshit and post what you continue to brag about.

FlyBoysays:

Essentially, they say that if you are rich, then the lizards will come to you. Yes, but what about the quality !!!!!!

FlyBoysays:

@Josh, haha, I would concede if you can find someone who talked about it the way I will do.

My system is not a self contained system. It requires that you have a modicum of game a priori. In the next post, I was planning to say, that you don’t need world class game, or even average game. All you need is “Don’t Fuck It Up Game”. So if you are a dork with no social dexterity, especially around women, then go and learn from the experts on the web, and practice. All you need is the beginner stuff. SB are very forgiving when compared to feral ones out there.

Essentially my system is a supplemental system to your tried and true game, designed for high score rates on SA and similar places. It’s not suitable for the man on a budget, or the do it yourself types. It’s only suitable for a man with cash, better yet, cash and swagger.

The problem with game and PUA, is that it is geared toward the young and broke, so any mention of money causes epileptic reactions. This leaves a guy with money and a willingness to use it as a lubricant to ease his conquests, lost with no guidance. Even the ones (PUAs) who are willing to explore how a rich man can get it done, offer solutions that are reluctant and fantastical in nature (no real life experience).

Essentially, they if you are rich, then lizard will come to you. Yes but what about the quality !!!!!!

Have a lot to say, but I have to go

@Josh lol

LadyScarlettsays:

@flyr, I think it is good to focus on and explain terms of an arrangement in regards of ‘us’ or ‘we”, or what arrangement relationship positives will be for both parties, like you are focusing on his needs, but at the same time are fulfilling yours by being with someone who you genuinely connect with, so that the focus isn’t on just your sacrifice or his ‘money’/’gifts’ to you, but what positive attributes will come out of an arrangement that will benefit you both, in terms of the relationship and not material goods. This leads with a positive image…and not just putting the focus of one person’s needs over the other. Unless, they are into that.

@FlyR

@FB definitely wants to drink what you are drinking.

LadyScarlettsays:

Hey struggles, how was your trip?(Chicago, right?)

FlyRsays:

@elaine

You published your list of the benefits but for me it was a little too this is all the ways I suffer. Those are the costs to you. I recognize that they are very real and that unless there are benefits to offset the costs you are out of the sugar game.

You mentioned some of the things your sd receives That’s the real essence of value. I think too many SB do not take the time to really think through what value the can add and target their selection process accordingly. I have a friend whose daughter is a disaster now 30 . His SB doesn’t need to spend hours preparing – why – she’s living the dream and hopes he had for his daughter Brilliant. Doing well in school humble nice strong grateful . That’s part of the value delivered .

Yea!!

I always wanted to be a proxy!!

My work here is done….

KennaKennasays:

Wow @Michael- my SD thinks/talks a lot like you.

FunDudesays:

@Sparkle

Sure, you don’t have to go to the gym and be in good shape since its “too much work”.

Men should take the same approach to allowances as well! Its too much effort and work to part with a good amount of money for a SB right? I mean we shouldn’t have to work hard to get your “attention” right?

@Keo, the “experiment” is super egalitarian. I does not discriminate based on age, ethnicity, weight, height, distance, etc.

The idea is to hit up as many women and observe their reaction to “no allowance” arrangements to determine if it flies.

FlyBoysays:

@StruggleIsReal, haha. You know me better than that. If I’m correct you misinterpreted the following statement.

“If on the other hand, you want a young college coed with low mileage poon and a pristine psychology, then throwing money at them is not the answer.”

What I wanted to say is that there is a method to giving without having it adversely impact your game. In other words, giving without having them feel like they are being bought, or feeling a obligation to perform for that money, and many other feelings that mishandling money might inadvertently trigger in the mind of a woman. That’s all.

Hey girl, glad you’re happy!

sparklebabesays:

@keo Thank you I’ll check it out. I enjoyed our chat now back to my studies! Good luck to all.

Michael1125says:

@sparkle….

I will try this one time to be polite (After all, you might have a single friend with whom you could hook me up!)

The tone of your comments doubtless carries over to your profile and your interactions with POT SD’s

You absolutely must understand that this is not an equal balance of needs, etc. like a normal relationship. There is no obligation for me (the customer) to change my preferences because it’s “not fair” that you can’t go to the gym (I recommend sprints by the way as the fastest way to lose fat without a gym)

Obviously I’m not being fair. I need to lose weight myself. I am not, however, obese, smelly, poor hygiene, etc. but I’m the customer.

So in exchange for the 30 to 35k per year (in MIDWEST dollars, which is more than any POT SB I have met makes at her job) I would be HAPPY to spend on the right lady, I expect a few things.

I try very hard to articulate these wishes politely, and I absolutely treat any lady in my life with a great deal of courtesy and respect.

On the other hand, if I (or any other man here) do not wish to invest the time, money, and effort in a lady whom I find unattractive; or who has too much attitude/drama; or who simply isn’t a good fit for me in the bedroom, THAT IS MY RIGHT.

This isn’t “unfair” for you. This is nature of an arrangement.

Honestly, you aren’t being held to a different standard because of your race. Regardless of ethnicity (I love Latinas as well!) what I want is fairly simple:

1) I want you available to spend time with me when my work and travels allow

2) I want no drama/no attitude

3) I want you to look great and be dressed and coifed very nicely (Trust me, I will gladly pay for everything that goes with this)

4) I want to hold your hand when we cross the streets, pull out your chair at the restaurant, and spend at least 10 minutes kissing you in the rain when possible!

From what I see in your posts, I don’t think at this time that you would be able to provide any of those things to me, the customer.

Hence your difficulties.

I truly wish you the best, but if I was a broke, unemployed, loser living in a mobile home, neither you or any other lady here would give me the time of day.

@Promise, the 37 YO is several states away and I have no intention of meeting her. She is part of my “no allowance” experiment.

@Sparklebabe… Jillian Michael. Her DVD’sd are the truth! I’ve lost 10pd in a month from working out and not eating junk.

Joshsays:

@SouthernSB

“I love a gentleman and I was under the impression that @Josh and @FunDude were just taking older women out and “pump and dumping” them and not even giving them the respect they would give a street whore.”

Has anyone on here tried Perfect Arrangement?

Promisesays:

@Struggle I hope some of your luck rubs off on me.

sparklebabesays:

@michael thank you for the feedback and i get what you’re saying, but what im saying is for the thicker women such as myself yes you can go to the gym. yes we can try to muscle up but how long would that take and can we afford a membership at a gym and do we have time for the gym. all these factors come into play when we hit this subject. im saying be realistic everyone doesn’t look like a barbie doll. and were perfectly healthy with our size. so y should i try to work so hard for your attention. yes being a sb is hard work i have a little experience. also everyone has a right to their own opinion. i also have tattoos and yes it was a great idea getting them. i do cover them when need but a SD looking for girls in the new day and age who doesn’t have a tat? just look at reality is all im saying i live in atlanta and seems like we all have tats.

Dazed-SDsays:

@Michael1125, I’m old for this site, I’m 54 and even someone as old as me agree’s completely with this statement you made, “By definition I am the “good SD” that you are seeking. I’ve wasted a month on this site with continual fake photos, flakes, and constant contacts from women whom I wouldn’t date if they were paying me!” My membership is up in 29 days and I won’t renew.

@lol at paying you for BJ’s your asking for! That would be me. The POT I’m talking to know say he doesn’t want it be all about sex. Which worried me. I was like, “um but there will be sex right? ” lol

@Struggle… you’ve been holed up with your SD? Nice!

StruggleIsRealsays:

Man… this blog has been no fun place lately, as far as I can tell from the skimming through. I’ve been away for a couple of weeks due to work and love, lust, & fun.

SD, or whatever you want to call him (he’s younger than me), are happier than I ever could have imagined. He’s the most beautiful human I have ever seen, not to mentioned genius, kind, and successful. He pays me for blow jobs I beg him for. It makes no sense whatsoever, but is so fucking hot. We are starting to talk about me moving near to him… It’s going well. Let’s just say, we are very very happy. What I am NOT happy about are the next few weeks apart. Not happy at all.

@Josh–
I am really surprised and disappointed that you posted the profile text of an unknowing individual, considering you have harangued others for doing so previously, multiple times.

@ONSD
Glad benefactor chickadee got back to you! At the very least

@Elaine
Nice to see you. Really nice.

@Fly
Please do not post something about how to bag chicks for less here. There are other blogs for that. Make a tumblr, for cryin’ out loud. Can we not just have decent conversation here?

Promisesays:

@Josh the 37 yo.

@Michael.. no you actually gave some really great advice without having to refer to her as delusional, which she might be but it was good honest criticism. That someone could appreciate without putting their backs up. I wish I had went with my first mind of saying something similar. And I hope she takes the constructive criticism well.

sparklebabesays:

@keo my hair is super short im only 6 months in and ive tried twist outs and ive gotten good at them but they dont last long because my hair drinks any kind of moisture within a few hours and the thickness of my hair. i do wear wigs when i have the money to buy one and weaves are too expensive for me right now all my money is tied up.

I’m surprised @Josh or @FumDude didn’t jump on her comment first. Lol

@Michael.. yeah I thought the same thing. Lol. Poorly worded for sure.

Michael1125says:

Sorry, hit submit too soon…

This is getting so annoying that I probably won’t renew my membership…

By definition I am the “good SD” that you are seeking. I’ve wasted a month on this site with continual fake photos, flakes, and constant contacts from women whom I wouldn’t date if they were paying me!

Let me simplify for you:

If you are thick, go to the gym. Only a small fraction of the men on this site are interested in “thick”, rubenesque, BBW, whatever….

Tattos? Brilliant plan getting those. Cover a few up, until your SD is so enamored of you he won’t care.

Hair not perfect? See a stylist.

In exchange for the gifts, fine dining, traveling (I’m flying a lady to Vegas next week) and the ALLOWANCE which everyone harps on, I expect a few reasonable things

1) Good attitude

2) You look classy when you are with me

3) You are an attentive lover

4) You adjust your schedule when possible.

Oh, I’m sorry, that sounded too much like “jumping through hoops!”

Best of luck in your search…

On allowance vs no allowance.. I forgot who said it but having someone you can rely to get the car fix was really on point. Me personally I don’t need an allowance mainly because I know I will have a hard time being completely accommodating. But if I need someone to pay my son’s tuition or speech therapy so I can put more in my savings that would work for me. Or if I decide to go on a girls trip having spending money would be nice. I might be giving SB’s a bad name but I don’t require much. Lol I really just need a FWB of the sexual and financial kind. Lol

Michael1125says:

“”i want to be pampered but i dont want to have to jump through hoops to get it. i feel like as a brown sugar baby we have to do more and be a certain way to get a decent SD some of us are on the thick side and have tattoos and no our hair isn’t perfect so how do we sort through all the mud and find the gold?””””

Please tell me this comment wasn’t serious!

Well my dinner has been postponed. He just got back from out of the states and had to catch up on work on top of having a cold. It sucks but I totally understand.

We were texting for 1 of the two weeks he was out of town. But there was a huge time difference. His 2nd day back we chatted literally for 4 almost 5 hrs. He says he thought of me all day today. I feel that texting isn’t the same as meeting though. I feel like you can’t figure out true chemistry that way. It’s a bit artificial.

SB’s how long would you text/ phoning before moving on.
SD’s your thoughts on texting/phoning.

Joshsays:

@Promise

Which one?

@Sparklebabe How long is your hair? Two strand twist, untwisted. Add natural looking hair for fullness and to a cute flat twist updo. Are you completely done with weaves? I don’t care for them personally but some are really flattering. How about a wig? Most of the guys I dated (white or black) liked my hair natural so it hasn’t been much of an issue. You need to get your hair done and update your profile pictures.

@keo ok the only problem is i’m afraid of flat irons and curlers because of the bad experiences i’ve had being burnt. i really dont want to put a perm (chemicals) in it do u have and helpful tips?

Joshsays:

Test continues…

A 21 year-old health field “brainy” student contacted me from a college town about 2 hours away. I gave my spiel on no allowance. He response was: How about nice dates and gifts? I said, sure. 😉

I am not sure if this is going to go any further than this as the college town is 2 hours away…too far for my liking.

I think that those who are doing the no allowance “arrangements” had a reason to do that, and now I see the dynamics of the same. No allowance “arrangements” are easier on green SBs’ system, than escortish money exchange arrangements.

That is how Coco Chanel got her start too she was a mistress to someone who opened up a shop for her in the south of France and paid for the business costs.

xElainesays:

Sorry, keybord is getting mad

xElainesays:

@Peepsees

I am an old blogger, have left blog some time ago because I was sick of the negativity and cheap talk.
But for a moment dragged back in, because of the subject.

I am running my own business in fashion industry and not “into” a traditional relationship.
Been there, done that.
Being a mistress is what fits me best.

So, even though not my profession, I treat being a mistress in a professial way, because I don’t see it as easy money having to be thrown at me by rich men, only “because I deserve it”
If I get an allowance worth a month salary, I want to perform like I would for said salary.

I have, and will, never talk about my allowances or SDs on blog.
That is something between me and them, and doesn’t belong at a public blog.

What I can, and will say, is that they are helping me to get financially independent.
They enjoy to see me being succesful.

sparklebabesays:

Brown sugar baby checking in and i just wanted to ask a few questions.
ok
I have natural hair i cut all my hair off 6 months ago to go natural and most of my pics i have a long wavy weave and natural looking make-up so should i take those down or keep them?
i want to be pampered but i dont want to have to jump through hoops to get it. i feel like as a brown sugar baby we have to do more and be a certain way to get a decent SD some of us are on the thick side and have tattoos and no our hair isn’t perfect so how do we sort through all the mud and find the gold?

peepssays:

@elaine it sounds like you view mistressing as a job. Do you have a real job or long term goals? What is the advantage of being in your position? I honestly don’t see the benefit. How much money are we talking here? Do you have a savings account from this? An apartment in your name?

Elainesays:

@Josh

Mistresses like me?
Few, and let’s keep it that way!
Serious? There are, if you know what you have to search for.
And don’t forget, it is an old wisdom: “Pay peanuts, get monkeys” …

“are you saying that throwing money at women at SA is going to turn them into quality mistresses”
No, of course not! Useless!

But paying a fair allowance to the right woman might do.
And no, that in most cases IS NOT the 22Y SUPERMODEL, she is often too full of herself to understand that this is HIS party!

All SDs expecting a “hot” 19y old hairdresser/waitress/nurse/makeup artist or even a student, to make a quality mistress, understanding your family and business responsabilities and stress, always available for you at an hour notice, are as delusional as the “princesses that deserve to be spoiled”

peepssays:

The SB game is a not advantageous for women on the long-term because it cuts down on commitment which is, I’m sorry the only real source of stability in a woman’s life long-term. Is 3k, 5k or whatever, going to change anyone’s life ??? Seriously? It is a great help but it is a short-term loan with dire consequences for the long-term. SBing is a short-term game. ONLY. Attractive band-aid solution.

After a few years, smart SBs should focus on finding men who are older (10-15 yrs) for commitment and children. SB’ing is not a life-long activity and y’all bragging about allowances have to realize that what you give is circumstancially beneficial but it is potentially damaging if it takes up the woman’s years where she could find a man who commits to her. If a woman wants to do this, she’s better have a quit date in sight. VERY LOW yield game.

The “mistress” game is another story. That’s sunk costs cruise hitting right there if the SB game goes on for too long. Meaning: a woman now has no life of her own and is a shadow on a man’s life waiting at his beck and call. Not going anywhere after that…The only instance where this could happen is if a man does gift the woman a substantial lifestyle meaning apartment and retirement accounts. Otherwise, it’s suicide.

Joshsays:

@AmusedSD

“while we’re talking about high dollar SD’s, that’s what the best of the SB’s will do.”

Logic, reason and fairness is not how women roll. If they did then most men would not even need mistresses or SBs. They would just get all that at home.

Pretending that SBs or mistresses are cut from a different genetic cloth is a folly most men engage in. A high priced mistress is not too much emotionally different from a low priced one. They would behave differently based on what THEY have to lose regardless of what the man has to lose.

That’s why I consider most men to oscillate between being dumb or dumber.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Elaine – @Josh has a point…you can throw money at someone and get them to be “good” for a while…but…if she doesn’t ALREADY have the mindset you typed, she’s not going to be able to KEEP things that way for long.

The percentages of SBs meeting that criteria on this site is significantly SMALL…even if you were throwing significant money at them…that’s the trouble we discuss as SDs…

Very few women have control over their autopilot sabotage. One never knows when a woman is going to start the sabotage. Then you have the whole realm of vengeance.

Elainesays:

No @Josh

That is what a quality mistress does for her benefactor and for her allowance.
And that is why I have no problems whatsoever finding quality benefactors, and can even be extremely picky.
Because quality mistresses are very hard to find here for the few left quality benefactors.

But that is something that most blog “SD’s” will never experience.

Too obsessed with their p4p games.
Too focussed on “young”, but not realizing “young” is most often not in the right circumstances, and too obsessed with herself, to make a quality mistress.

@Elaine
Well written and all good points.

flyRsays:

@elaine

Elainesays:

And, if they would have “kept” a quality mistress, the murdered Google exec would still be alive, Dominique Strauss Kahn could now have been president of France and this guy would still be a well respected top economist….

This is the message I send a year ago to my ,still actual, SD when we were talking about my allowance.

Thought it fitted weLl in this topic.

Chrissysays:

I have climbed out of my ice palace! I find it disheartening that the lady in the photo that accompanies this article is holding $1.00 bills, did her SD get lost on the way to the strip club?

@ONSD So glad to hear that the benefactor card is leading somewhere other than to slaps in your face. I can’t wait to hear updates!

@ATL “It’s national short girl day today. So here’s a toast to all you waist high, flat head and no teeth sugar babies. ;)”
When is national tall girl day? I totally googled it but I couldn’t locate, I should have used Bing. I want to be prepared for you to worship my statuesque legs in 5 inch heels or have my baseball bat ready to brawl.

Elainesays:

“Love,

You think I am an expensive, spoiled queen?
You think my allowance is too high?
You think you “pay for sex” for “youth” or “being hot”?

You don’t!

You pay me for always looking my best, buffed and polished
You pay me for being your fantasy, because you know how reality looks at home.
You pay me for going to the gym, and keep in shape, you don’t want a saggy mistress

You pay me for sending you sexy pics during your endless businessmeetings
You pay me to receive naughty messages during boring familydinners
You pay me for always keeping my suitcase ready to travel, with only few hours notice
You pay me for not getting mad when you cancel our meetings at the very last moment
You pay me to never hear about my troubles leaving from work, or arranging babysitters
You pay me for not having to hear about my problems
You pay me for always being happy and smiling.

You pay to call me in the middle of the night, because you have to tell someone about the successful deal you just closed
You pay me to complain about your colleagues, fellow boardmembers or competitors
You pay me to get rid of your daily stress, by talking to someone you can trust
You pay me to Skype when you feel lonely in your hotelroom
You pay me because you always forget about the timedifference, and calling when I sleep.
You pay me for lonely roomservice meals, while you are downstairs for a business dinner
You pay me for waiting in uncomfortable heels and lingerie, until you come back from your businessmeeting.
You pay me because you don’t want to enter a 5*hotel with “Pretty Woman” at your side.

You pay me because you cannot offer me a mutual future
You pay me for not having any expectations
You pay me because you know otherwise I would expect much more from you, emotionally.
You pay me for making you carry on and manage to stay with your family
You pay me for lonely Christmasses, when you are with your them.
You pay me for leaving without drama, when you want to end the relationship

You pay me to listen to you, whining about your wife not wanting sex with you
You pay me to listen to you, complaining about your wife not understanding you
You pay me to not call her when I get upset with you
You pay me for not finding your kinks back in the headlines

You pay me to make you believe you are the best lover in the world.

You don’t pay me for sex
You pay me for being your relief! “

FlyBoysays:

@flyR,
“Ya got a basketball player who can’t sink free throws so he goes on his favorite blog to rant rather than hitting the court for 1,000 practice shots with a coach.

The ball is over inflated, the court is tilted, the crowd is distracting, the lights shine in his eyes, the air is stale, the dog ate his lucky shoes, the other team insulted him, the ref looked hard at him, the coach ruined his unique style, the reporter suggested he was on drugs……….”

Out of the fucking park! Well done sir!

Maybe before any advice can be taken seriously, a success quotient should affixed to it (even if the number is fictitious, it would be amusing to see how good of a fantasy teller the writer is lol)

Cheers

flyRsays:

Ya got a basketball player who can’t sink free throws so he goes on his favorite blog to rant rather than hitting the court for 1,000 practice shots with a coach.

The ball is over inflated, the court is tilted, the crowd is distracting, the lights shine in his eyes, the air is stale, the dog ate his lucky shoes, the other team insulted him, the ref looked hard at him, the coach ruined his unique style, the reporter suggested he was on drugs……….

Joshsays:

@OnlineNewbieSD

“@Josh – The ones not comfortable with the “explicit money talk” aren’t setting themselves up for failure IF they understand how to screen for the fake SDs…”

Maybe true. But my feeling is that since they don’t understand what is “reasonable”, they shoot for the moon regardless of who the SD is. I have had a few newbies telling me, “I don’t want to get ripped off.”

The escorts, on the other hand, know what a john would pay them in a given market, and they bump it up a notch, close the deal, stick around to close more deals, and create a group of “regulars”. This is a safe hunting place for escorts.

The newbies, after trying to determine their “worth” on the higher side get discouraged, and regardless of what kind of SDs they encounter in reality, everyone becomes a jerk because they could not rise to the occasion.

The hypothesis to test is: If the “I don’t do allowance” can put them at ease that there is no transaction involved so nothing to negotiate?

Within few hours of sending 5 “I don’t do allowance” messages to women ranging 32-42, three responded. The first, 32 years-old, said that she was not even sure if the SB/SD model worked at all. So she was testing it. I offered her to choose a restaurant of her liking, she chose a restaurant at TGI Friday’s level. Let’s see if if she actually shows up to the date.

The second is 35 and protesting…claiming that she wants to be treated like a wife without commitments. Will see if she comes around.

The third who responded is 42. Agreed to meeting without a peep. I need to communicate with her more to see what she is up to.

I find it fascinating how you continuously express my thoughts in writing here. You should consider creating a separate MGPTOW blog, I think it would be a huge hit.

AmusedSDsays:

Josh, I was making a general observation. Not impugning your game.

FunDudesays:

Yay Lunch Break

@Southern

I have already stated the types of women in their 30s that are “acceptable” to me. They are women who had long term relationships with stable NORMAL men. They are still relatively low mileage and only had a few long term relationships in the past.

The problem is that most women in their 30s are bitching about the “jerks” that pumped and dumped them and now want a “nice guy” to pay their way.

Who the hell wants to be that “nice guy”?

@Josh

Of course I don’t speak like this to potential SBs the way I talk on this blog.

However, I am still firm in my dealings with them along the lines I have stated.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

Oh, I forgot – Benefactor Card UPDATE!

I received an email from the young woman I gave the “Benefactor” card to…her message was polite, letting me know she was going to buy some reading material for her Spring Break trip…the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy…I had to look it up…if she’s into that kind of reading material, I could be a very happy SD!

While she did not ask for another meeting, she did not blow me off…she wants to find out more about what “benefactor” means…

Right ONSD, I would never take it out on an SD. Right now I’ve been busy fighting off the country of Nigeria. It’s amazing how many Italians live there. 😉

RookieSDsays:

@ONSD
“ot bitter, used up bitches) to be VERY interested in a GENTLEMAN style SD…you make reservations at a restaurant that is accustomed to reservations…you are a bit chivalrous with the door going into and out of the restaurant…the wait-staff doesn’t even ask if it’s separate checks and just hands you the bill…your conversation over the meal is not about sexual positions, conquests, locations or frequency of spreading her legs – and it’s not about how little you would have to commit to get her legs to spread…when the meal is over and you’re saying your good-byes, a kiss is all she wants to feel WANTED…then…when she sends you a message about what a great time she had, send her an e-gift card to someplace she mentioned, that will cover something she mentioned, from your dinner conversation. The second meeting will find a ferocious lover, and you may never NEED to discuss an allowance!”

Great point and reflects my personal dealings with older women. Had some of them tell me to the effect “You are like a breath of fresh air compared to the jerks I’ve went out with before”.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Amused – Exactly…regardless of race, gender, “worth”, size, shape, cash, income, assets…it ALL boils down to the right attitude!

SouthernSBsays:

OK if the explict non-discussion about an allowence is what @ONSD is talking about please ignore my rant. I love a gentleman and I was under the impression that @Josh and @FunDude were just taking older women out and “pump and dumping” them and not even giving them the respect they would give a street whore. I misunderstood, so please accept my apology. I think what is happening is I may be projecting a little. Sorry about that and I need to keep whatever bitterness I may feel off the board. It’s just that the general women hating got the best of me.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Southern – women over 30 aren’t the only ones that have trouble understanding or communicating their worth in this type of situation…

This is where the “slow-play” courtship can play into her situation as a BENEFIT!

Continue to tell the guy you expect him to be a gentleman…if he doesn’t show you what your definition of gentleman is, move on…if he does, you’ll probably NEVER have to communicate about your “worth” or “value” because he’ll be exceeding your expectations — all without having to put a dollar sign on the situation!

AmusedSDsays:

@OnlineNewbieSD
Bingo. Depending on the specifics, a little chivalry, respect a gift card and/or a spa day and that makes a *lot* of women happy. Plus, the fact that she has a ‘benefactor’ that if the car breaks down and she needs $482 to fix it, that she has someone that can help her.

You get more with honey, than with vinegar.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Southern – you’re exactly right…a gentleman will do SOMETHING. I think @Josh and @FunDude continue to talk about the women (I would say if you’re over 30 you’re truly a woman, unlike the younger ones that could still be considered a “young woman” or “girl” to some of us) who project the entitlement attitude, demand significant CASH prior to any benefit, and really pain a picture in the SD’s mind of a “used up, racheted out, bad decision maker” who isn’t worth even a dinner before a pump-and-dump.

I think @Josh’s most recent post, however, was more about the woman who (as @FunDude or @Amused even mentioned) was in a significant relationship that ended for WHATEVER reason, has her life together and just wants to have some fun for herself for a change…the profile doesn’t scream entitled, doesn’t bash men because of her loser relationships in her 20s, there’s no DEMAND for thousands of dollars to “prove” the level of SD, etc.

I think there are many shallow people on this site, regardless of gender or age or race…as bloggers, we’re inclined to focus on the bad we experience, because it’s easy…I’m actually happy to hear @Josh talk in positive light about women in 30s and hope he has some success with them!

SouthernSBsays:

@Josh-Us women over thirty have a hard time knowing our worth and a hard time negotiating. After all just look at what you and FD have been ranting about on the board for the last week. How on earth are we suppose to have a firm point that we will pick not to go under when you guys are raving about how we are used up, racheted out, bad decision makers, unattractive and not even worth pump and dumping? You (in general, not personally) don’t even take two minutes to hear our stories to find out why we are here. You just think we have spent our youth on projects and X-Box players, when in reality we may have been married to the love of our lives and he could have done everything from died in our wars of choice, to left us for two twenties, to went out for a beer and never returned, leaving us with children to raise in a time before internet boards where you could meet someone to help you out with the hardships of life. Now we are a little (or a lot) older and all that get said about us is that we are sloppy seconds.
I feel that none of us made any worse decisions than any girl in her early 20’s. I just feel that we were born before a time when this kind of thing just wasn’t done. I had my share of men with money trying to meet me, but they were all blocked by their friends, colleagues, and entourages. It was doubly bad for me, since I was always attracted to white and Latino men. I have actually been to military events where I’ve tried to talk to lower rank officers and had higher rank officers drag the guys away from me. The same thing use to happen when I would talk to doctors and lawyers. Seems everyone thought I was a gold digger (which I wasn’t those were just the guys I was attracted to) and it wasn’t really a good time for interracial relationships with girls who were really unique. That was the 80’s, and yeah it wasn’t bad but it still wasn’t good.
Now you just want to date older women without giving them the same respect that you would give a girl in her 20’s? That’s just cruel. If she is nice and can fulfill your needs as a SD why can’t you leave her an envelope like you would do for a 20 yr. old? I’m not saying you have to give her as much as a 20 yr. old, but why wouldn’t you give her something for her time? She’s giving up part of her day or evening just like someone 10 or 20 years her junior. Even if she doesn’t discuss an allowance with you, you could leave her something, that’s what a gentleman would do, and you all are gentlemen, aren’t you?

PureSinsays:

****certainly not getting the latter

flyRsays:

@ pure – Qualify the potential “buyer”

intent ?
experience ?
capacity?
goals?

What brought you to SA ?
Have you had a prior SB, if so how did it work out for you?
How long did the relationship last ?
Are you comfortable with this type of relationship?
What did you like best about the relationship?

if there is concern about intent then
So that I am not wasting your time, my goal is a (short term-long term) relationship in the range indicated in my profile . I realize we have not met but were we to be mutually attracted is that within your range.

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Josh – The ones not comfortable with the “explicit money talk” aren’t setting themselves up for failure IF they understand how to screen for the fake SDs…

I’ve found most of the 30+ women (who are not bitter, used up bitches) to be VERY interested in a GENTLEMAN style SD…you make reservations at a restaurant that is accustomed to reservations…you are a bit chivalrous with the door going into and out of the restaurant…the wait-staff doesn’t even ask if it’s separate checks and just hands you the bill…your conversation over the meal is not about sexual positions, conquests, locations or frequency of spreading her legs – and it’s not about how little you would have to commit to get her legs to spread…when the meal is over and you’re saying your good-byes, a kiss is all she wants to feel WANTED…then…when she sends you a message about what a great time she had, send her an e-gift card to someplace she mentioned, that will cover something she mentioned, from your dinner conversation. The second meeting will find a ferocious lover, and you may never NEED to discuss an allowance!

I am going to give “I don’t do allowance” a try with women of all ages and report how it went.

PureSinsays:

Any other woman noticing that this new wave of younger Sds are all looking for girlsfriends? WTH!

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@Southern – Agreed – just a waste of EVERYONE’S time and energy to see if there is validity to the profile…that is why SA needs to market the way they do…once people catch on to the “game” they quit paying on the SD side and they disappear on the SB side (but the profiles are never deleted to keep the 8:1 ratio they like to market!)…

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

@FunDude – you were complaining about Maryland messages…I just got one from LIMA, PERU!

Yeah, no…block…delete…just stupid…

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

Here’s a sign of the times…I received two messages over the weekend I had not been able to check on (not that I can read the message, but I like to see if the profile is worth me paying to contact)…BOTH profiles, when I clicked the picture on the message went to a page that said “profile has been deleted”…TWO…I cannot believe they signed up, met someone and deleted their profile all over a weekend…especially when one was in her late 30s according to the brief info by the Inbox message and the other was 19…

Joshsays:

@FunDude

Most of them were eager to having sex in the car. LOL!

OnlineNewbieSDsays:

RE: Numbers –

Regardless of the “national” or “international” numbers SA markets to gain new profiles (I’m not calling them members or people, since I think a significant majority of them are not kept long enough to call members or people) it ALL boils down to that INDIVIDUAL member’s experience!

This is why…when a SD or SB comes onto blog and bitches about not getting any hits, there is a question to see the profile to prove attraction to the opposite sex.

This is ALSO why…I think the second question to “prove” a bitch about not getting any hits should include the search results for the location you want to Sugar.

You could be a SB with solid “8” looks and decent attitude, well written profile and decent representation for pics…but if you’ve only got 15 Active SDs within 50 miles of your targeted Sugar Spot, it’s GOING TO BE AN UPHILL CLIMB!

Same said for the SD with Lifestyle Expectation matching the location, average looks, prime of life age (meaning he’s not using a walker or on oxygen, or using them on a walk around the block), decent profile and representative pics…if there’s only 20 Active SBs within 50 miles of his Sugar Spot, it’s GOING TO BE AN UPHILL CLIMB!

When you pile on top less than appealing looks, poorly written profiles, a lack of ability to communicate with the opposite sex, a lack of experience with the opposite sex, a bad attitude about life, etc….now things get REALLY DIFFICULT!

When I last ran the number for my location (and I used a fake SB profile for the SD numbers) it came out to about 1:1 Active SB to Active SD within a 50 mile radius. I did NOT eliminate any body type, age, race, etc. When I broke the search by expectation level, the Minimal was about 2:1.5 SB to SD, Practical was 1:2 SB to SD, the Negotiable was 4:1 SB to SD, Moderate was 2:1.5 SB to SD, High was 5:1 SB to SD and Substantial was 4:1 SB to SD.

Interesting that the Minimal and the Moderate seemed to be the sweet spot to find the SB if you were an SD!

@Kenna or start by getting some friends Lmao.

UncommonSBsays:

Do you guys like this idea?”

My two cents… If you’re doing a rustic (or other relevant) theme, then these are fine. Start with determining your overall theme and/or event color palette, and then your selections for location, correspondence, favors, linens and other decor will all be cohesive.

NilPostersays:

I’m on to the money 😉

Fundude [Besides from being the least fundude in the world it seems] Has GOT to be a plastic surgeon.
The way I perceive it, no one else as a medical surgeon would place such high values on the cover of the book than the content inside it…

flyRsays:

Fly – headed in an interesting direction,

FlyBoysays:

How to get laid like a boss on seekingarrangement!
Post 1 XXXXX

The game I’ll write about in these posts was used by me two years ago when I started seeing the influx of ‘normal’ college girls on here. It worked wonders for me.

The general game parameters are designed by a man with money and will work for others like him. That does not mean those with limited means can not use it, or part of it. I just don’t have any experience doing it on a budget and therefore should not talk about that aspect of it.

I can hear you say, well, well, FlyBoy, if you have money and a willingness to throw it at them, the lizards will flock to you.

Yes you are correct. You will get the escorts, the porn stars, the adult models, the lifelong “SBs” .. etc. In other words marginal poon at best.

If on the other hand, you want a young college coed with low mileage poon and a pristine psychology, then throwing money at them is not the answer.

Before we close the money issue, a few thoughts:

1. If you are the type who believes giving entitles you to treat people like slaves. You’ll not do very well with this game.

2. If you are reluctant to part with money before talking about it and knowing what you are getting, and if your buck is banging … and other such obscene behavior, then this game will definitely not work for you.

3. If you feel like a loser because you have to ‘pay’ for it while others get it for ‘free’, then you don’t need this game, instead you should:

a. Go ahead and use other tactics to get the ‘free’ ones. and/or
b. Seek help with working on your game.

“Great schools, including Harvard turn out a lot of idiot MBA’s , they were intellectually challenged when they arrived and they left the same way.”

You got that Dr. Ergo? That’s Wisdom of Solomon right there. Right FB? 😉

flyRsays:

@Fun

Great schools, including Harvard turn out a lot of idiot MBA’s , they were intellectually challenged when they arrived and they left the same way. They may have incredible IQ’s but lack judgement and most importantly the lack leadership skills and an appreciation for what they do not know.

In the VC firm you need to do something that distinguishes you from the masses. Generally that means generating great deals, bringing in capital or fixing the failing deals (finding a dumb buyer is considered fixing) or leading others to do the heavy lifting.

My impression is that those who succeed are generally those who strive towards excellence in what they are doing , in execution, not striving to get to the top of the pyramid. If you think that getting an MBA from a good school is like getting a certificate for an Obamaphone, that you are entitled to a ride to the top.

“You must satisfy Suzy who has a checklist that you need to check every box in it.”

And every year Suzy is miraculously able to identify few of the boxes you did not get checked, and hence the promotion is postponed to the next year. 😉

flyRsays:

“The “surplus” is only 15 days for total world oil consumption. Also, most non OPEC countries are UNABLE to afford such low prices. Venezuela, Russia, etc require over 90 per barrel to function economically.”

Let me try to simplify this for you.

“require $90 / bbl to function economically”

That can mean 11 things to 10 different people.

If I have an oil well completed my cost to pump and transport the oil is not anything remotely approaching that level. The marginal cost of production depends on many factors.

If I borrowed the funds to buy the rights when oil was $120, drill the wells when rigs were busy, including the dry holes, complete the wells, produce and transport the oil plus pay severance and income taxes then I may may need $90/ bbl to have a positive cash flow. Once I have bought the rights and drilled and finished the well, built the infrastructure the decision process changes.

If you decide to pursue an MBA and you listen you’ll learn the one of the foundational concepts , sunk costs are sunk.

Despite assurances from DC. there’s a lot of stuff happening in the world. The ISIS dudes want to pump as much oil as possible to buy more arms, the Kurds want to produce oil to buy arms and congressmen, the Iranians want to buy presidents and sell oil to build bombs, the Russians want more foreign exchange, and so it goes around the world. Ironically in the short term lower prices may spur production.

If all of this were not enough oil flows through some very threatened waterways from modern pirates to terrorists to belligerent nations.

On the other side , demand is affected by the world economy.

The market is relatively efficient (although terminally corrupt and stupid at times) and the odds of a casual outsider making an investment based on superior knowledge is pretty slim. The lone wolf insider has a better chance based on better knowledge of the facts and the flaw of the analysts. The fact that the securitized mortgage business was a huge ponzi scheme was apparent to most disinterested observers. However , the relentless promotion of those making billions and the cooperation of the politicians they purchased allowed the scam to continue until the inevitable collapse.

The important thing is don’t deceive yourself that you are making an intelligent investment decision with a few hours of casual research and listening to salesmen repeat what they have been programmed to repeat is research.

FlyBoysays:

FunDude, Of course some of them have an MBA, but it’s not the path to get there. You must do many other things where an MBA degree is lost in the noise. Becoming a partner isn’t a ‘job’ per say. That’s what I was trying to convey.

Think about it; how would you convince an investor to invest in the fund when you don’t have a track record of investing and or founding companies. Whether you have a MBA or not is immaterial.

Two ways to making partner, work like a donkey for years, and assuming they like you and see value in you, you will start the slow ascend to partner. Alternatively, sell your company, put some skin in the game by investing in the fund, and eventually make partner, assuming of course, they like you and find value in you.

All other support jobs, work like any corporate job. You must satisfy Suzy who has a checklist that you need to check every box in it.

Cheers

Joshsays:

Actually you can have bigger clout if you pool money together through one of the appropriate vehicles and then fund multiple companies. The flip side is that you can lose a lot if you are not deliberate in your investments.

its a good post. ive just joined and have had women immediately ask “what arrangement and payment: == nd they havent even met me —– or even shown their face! 0_O

Joshsays:

One of the ways to make it into the VC business is to become an accredited investor or angel investor. Build a portfolio of investments. If any one of them pops, you have instant clout.
[]http://money.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/mutual-funds/articles/2013/11/27/a-guide-to-angel-investing[]

KennaKennasays:

Do you guys like this idea?

Keosays:

@Josh, your right. @Kenna Your biggest Day is the birth of your child. Everything else pales in comparison :-). You never knew you could love anyone that much. Can’t describe it. You have to experience because nothing anyone says could even come close to the feeling.

Keosays:

@Josh Im on the site now. It’s pretty amazing. I’m going to give the information to my son’s school so she can be a coach and suggest things for him to work on. We can tag team back and forth encouraging him!

@Kenna I wish you were in Chicago so I can scan you. lol. It much more fun to scan people you know than strangers (okay total strangers,. lol)

AmusedSDsays:

@Flyboy
You are correct. I wasn’t talking about being an expert witness. I was talking about being co-counsel and getting a cut of the case.

What we see a *lot* of is doctor’s that build an impeccable resume over a course of 30-40 years. They find legal ‘consulting’ on the side and basically send out crap opinions saying the person isn’t hurt. They can make about $150k a year as a side job for doing relatively little work.

But typically between 12-24 months, the plaintiff’s side gets on to him, gets his 1099’s and W-2’s, how much he’s making for the defense, that he’s not doing ‘honest consulting’ and just working one side of the fence.

Some enjoy the work and throw themselves into it. 95% drop out at that point realizing it’s more hassle than it’s worth.

Expert witnesses can make okay money, but not that great. Co-counsels, getting a cut of the settlement or verdict make bank.

@AmusedSD, if someone wants to become an expert witness then they better have unimpeachable technical background, otherwise they should expect to be shredded by the other team.

Food for thought

Cheers

Joshsays:

@Keo,

I believe that KA starts from first grade onwards. They pretty much have EVERYTHING!!!

AmusedSDsays:

@FunDude
Just throwing this out there. It might totally not be your thing.

I’ve had a law practice and been a trial lawyer. Percentage-wise, there are relatively few good, high-dollar cases. And there are a *bunch* of lawyers chasing the few good cases. Lucrative, but hard to break into.

I was at a high-end, invitation only, trial lawyer event a few years ago and met a guy with an interesting situation. He had been a surgeon for 18 years and broke his hand playing softball. He was unable to get back the fine motor skills needed to keep being a surgeon. So, he went to law school.

Lawyers brought him in on their top cases to review and depose the doctor(s) in the case. He knew what was right and what was wrong and when the doctor was trying to bullshit him and what follow up questions to ask.

They brought him in just to go after the medical portion, they funded the entire case and gave him a cut of what was brought in. Just 2-3 years after law school, this guy had a *very* full roster of top, top dollar cases and was killing it.

Before you go off on freaking shysters and all that. You look at the cases and decide which ones you want to be involved with. Trust me, most of these cases aren’t close or judgment calls. Most of the cases, you’ll be going ‘Holy shit! How did this guy keep his license??’ And if it’s a case you think is too close on the doctor, don’t take it.

Just something to think about. This guy was seriously cleaning up like no one I’d seen before, and it was with medical knowledge so it was second nature for him.

@KennaKenna

“And the countdown has officially begun for the special day- 363 more days!”

I have a feeling that you wanted to type 263 more days and NOT 363 more days? 😉

Keosays:

He’s in 1st grade. He does soo poorly in Science because there are so many steps or concepts that he can’t remember. My poor little guy. He does okay in Math but I know as math get’s harder he will struggle. I will look into KhanAcademy for scienceThanks @Josh. I heard of them a while a go. I wonder if they have anything for his grade level. We do IXL for math current. He see’s a reading specialist for reading. Definitely worth it. He was failing reading and getting an A now.
I wonder if my daughter is Dyslexic @Promise. She is only 4 but writes everything backwards. Letters and numbers

@Keo, complement the tutor work with KhanAcademy.org. In time, you “may” be able to get rid of the tutors.

Promisesays:

@Kenna March 31st?

Keosays:

@Kenna Happy for you “ma”. It nice to hear it all work out for you.

Keosays:

@Promise. My son isn’t autism or anything just ADHD with poor working memory. So I spend a shit load on tutors. Along with OCD which he see’s pyschologist for. Both my kids see a speech therapist, none of wich is covered by insurance. His medication is a 100 a month. And he goes to a private school becasue the school where I live are crap. I’m broke. lol. And my daughter hasn’t started school yet.

KennaKennasays:

I basically met a young SM last night, one of SD’s friends’ girlfriends.

She is in her 30s, he is in his early 50s. He is going through a divorce with 3 kids, she is kidless and has a blooming career. Because he is going through expensive divorce, he lives with her and she pays 80% of bills and vacation trips. They seem very happy, and SD told me after one too many glasses of wine that she is basically his SM like I will be his one day. Hahahahahaha

I met so many interesting people last night, was 100% sober but still had a lot of fun. This is why I want to reiterate the connections this man has given me are priceless and worth so much more than the allowance. And the countdown has officially begun for the special day- 363 more days!

FunDudesays:

@Kenna

Thanks. I think you have the best take on this issue.

Flyboy is a cool guy but I think he’s more of a tech world dude.

FlyBoysays:

@Josh; So you would equate the publishing of a private message, which a profile is, without the owners permission, with posting a whimsical funny word because it might offend someone.

You know this is the oldest trick there is, either everything is perfect or nothing is. Fine, since we live in a imperfect world, then I guess we will just have to go ahead and treat you as someone with no sense of propriety. Since your motto seems to be, no perfection, why bother!

Yes, MBAs are overrated but VC firms like to see them, especially one from a top-tier school.

A great doctor does not equals a business man. Everyone I know that’s in the healthcare VC world has a MBA but it’s up to you if you want to try without.

Keosays:

@ Everyone. Okay, so as pertain to the blog… I’m the woman that doesn’t need a lot of sugar. I have a decent paying career 90K (2jobs 50hrs a week). But because my son is special needs, I don’t really have any thing for me when I get through with his expenses. I just want to be able pay off some credit cards and save some money. How should I approach my POT?

I am no SJW, but we have bigger women posting here as co-bloggers.

So you find it OK to find some new insulting word and unnecessarily “share” it at the blog to shame bigger co-bloggers because of their size?

FunDudesays:

@Fly

Why shouldn’t I talk about that? The average discussion with SBs on here is moron level stuff.

There are some smart dudes on here that might have some interesting ideas we can exchange.

The price of Brent Crude is going upwards due to increased demand from lower oil prices. Furthermore, many rigs are now starting to go offline.

The “surplus” is only 15 days for total world oil consumption. Also, most non OPEC countries are UNABLE to afford such low prices. Venezuela, Russia, etc require over 90 per barrel to function economically.

I thought consulting groups such as McKInsey specifically recruit only from “target” MBAs. Its almost impossible to get an interview as a straight MD.

They are very much about “pedigree” from what I have researched.

flyRsays:

FD – This is not the place for investment advice . A couple of data points . JP Morgan looks for them to suspend payments. Some folks are touting the large rise in gasoline prices in California as affecting oil prices but the rise is totally a function of the state having its own formula for gasoline which is only made in a few refineries , one of which is down after an explosion.

If you are coming here for investment advice you should probably put the money in a safe place. That’s not to say that there are not a number of brilliant minds here but they are focused on other matters.

Joshsays:

@FunDude

“Is it worth it for an MD to go for an executive MBA at a top ranked program (number 2 in the nation) to transition into healthcare related finance fields?”

I have an MBA, not from a top-tier university but we pretty much used the same curriculum used at Harvard. If I were you, I would go with a degree that has some “teeth”, such as, a Phd in a discipline of your choice, or even JD to defend yourself.

Keosays:

Meet a POT Saturday it was a bust. Meeting another one 2morro. Very excited. He seems to like my curves in the picture. I’ll come back and let you all know how it goes. He seems really sweet, 52. Separated. Understading of my situation. Wish me Luck!

FlyBoysays:

No Doc, You are a math major, you don’t need an MBA. MBAs are considered garbage these days no matter what school they got their paper from.

If you want to get into Venture Capital then start applying for an internship with a firm. This might not even require that you quit your job and go right away, but merely assessing plans from a technical point of view part time in your locale. Of course, you don’t want to end up being pigeon holed as a technician where there is no money.

If you want it you can do it, but don’t think it’s as simple as a degree and an interview. You practically have to beg for the job. On other hand, an easy way to get in is by building a successful medical business first, and then joining the VC world.

C’mon FB…search for “flyR says” and you will see all of his posts in their idiotic glory.

FlyBoysays:

@Josh; “You so smart…must be due to your dick size?”

No I don’t use my dick to search profiles … duh

Cheers lol

peepssays:

@josh
I am sorry but that post about the woman’s profile strikes me as racist and plain rude. It’s unnecessary…
I don’t think it’s necessary to bash people’s profiles as this reflects very poorly on this site. #justmy2cents

@FlyBoy

When people are all over the map, then the best thing for them is to find a nice, firm dildo and fuck themselves. It may help you too. 😉

GeorgiaPeachsays:

@FlyBoy
It was my supposition that manners don’t tend matter here.
Besides, I don’t think Josh is the one to deal with that issue, I think the one that should respond about “manners” is FunDude. He’s the one who tends to have the “open” mouth. Now ain’t that right, “Spanky”?

I will write several posts this evening detailing how to do it.
I will put 5 Xs in front of the Post number to allow you to search for them easily.

Cheers

Joshsays:

@SweeterThanPie

Skype, Google Voice or Hushed

Promisesays:

@Josh you just reminded me of an SD I saw a few weeks ago. The guy was looking for an SM, but he signed up to be a Sugar Daddy. I was so confused reading his account until I got to the ‘What I’m Looking For’ section.

@Josh wouldn’t she also be quite wealthy since she’s worked in all those industries?

Joshsays:

“the face and body of a 20-something young lady”

What a showoff…don’t all older women look like in their 20s? 😉

Joshsays:

43 year-old, black woman, full of shit?

About Me

I’ve been called a Dreamgirl and told that I’m too good to be true, by many. However, I am real to the core. What you can expect is a woman who is a smart deep thinker with a sharp business mind, who’s compassionate, sensual, loving, giving, playful, honest, trustworthy, funny, witty, extremely creative, highly affectionate, and touchy-feely. There’s nothing typical about me. I was created to be a very unique individual. Surely you will be able to confirm that for yourself. Since I’m so versatile and multifaceted, you will find that there is always something new and exciting or interesting to discover about me. Both articulate and well organized, I’ll admit that I have OCD tendencies when arranging things like closets, for instance. But nothing too crazy. I promise. I am sweet, but blunt. Girly, but not a priss. Mature, but young-spirited. Classy, yet a goofball at times. Being amongst different people in various social settings doesn’t rattle me. I’m naturally a social butterfly who can conform to her surroundings. When I’m totally comfortable with someone, I’m a real cut-up, so I hope you don’t mind bellyaching when I’m on a roll. It surfaces when it wants to, but my antics are always a great time. I’m a great cook and baker who loves to pamper that special someone and a woman who can and will stimulate your mind and capture your senses. Warning: Once I get into your head, it will be challenging to put thoughts of me aside, in order to concentrate on anything else. Trust me…I know. Get ready for a sexy, yet elegant woman who would represent you superbly in public and tend to you supremely in private. Plus I’m bi, so that makes for even more fun all-around. Well…if you’re into that sort of thing. I’m the kind of woman with whom, you don’t have to ask. I’m very often the sexual aggressor, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t also like being the “prey,” so to speak. Oh and in case you are wondering, no I do not have dreadlocks or an afro. My head is full of tiny, springy, natural coils, which I think, are quite fun to play with. None of the photos shown, were taken earlier than 8/14/13. So yes…I really do look this young. 😀 Gentlemen, I realize that I am at a disadvantage here because of my age. But think about it…you can have the best of both worlds. A seasoned woman with lots of life experience, who’s focused, knows what she wants, and how to treat a man superbly and yet, still get the vitality, fun, excitement, youthfulness, and the face and body of a 20-something young lady, all in one package. Don’t sell yourself short. I have extraordinary, natural talents in many areas of art and design and have done fabulous work for the restaurant, book publishing, fashion, and mostly the music industry. I’m highly skilled in graphic design, fashion and accessories, home interiors, home exteriors, landscapes, furniture, fountains, lighting, car interiors (mainly, seating and trims), custom car hardware, emblem and hood ornament designs, and designs for exterior vehicle modifications. There’s more, but that’s good enough for now. Lol. I’m also a cross-genre songwriter of pop, R&B, country, jazz, and dance music, though I’m a rockerchick/metalhead at heart. Reading, logic problems, brain teasers, and word games are faves of mine, when I’m alone, road-tripping, or in the air. I enjoy traveling, fishing, boating, dining, dancing, sewing, cultural/sporting events, concerts, movies, architecture, historical places, world cultures, photography, hot cars (classic or otherwise), motorcycles, billiards, bowling, and so much more. For a long time, I’ve been wanting to learn how to play golf, skeet shoot, fence, and become highly skilled in a martial art or two. I love to learn. So what can you teach me?

What I’m looking for

It would be fantastic to meet a special friend who shares many of my interests and desires. The character of the man I’m looking for is most important. Which is one who is an intelligent, honest, upstanding human being, with a super personality, is fun and humorous, and very affectionate. A kind and loving man who’s understanding and gentle can certainly win my affections. But he must be strong in character and assertive enough to know how to handle business and not let people walk all over him. Honestly, men of weak character sicken me. I love a man who knows the difference between having a youthful spirit or being young at heart and being a childish jackass. Not looking to go that route again. Believe it or not, I’ve never had a man who was romantic. Oh how I would love to know what that feels like. He must be a great listener and a strong and consistent communicator, genuine, attentive, and adventurous. Someone who can let loose and be goofy with me at times, would be so refreshing. I need a partner who loves to be touched, because I’m a hands-on woman who loves to caress, massage, hug, snuggle, groom, and take care of who I’m with, in any way possible. Whatever makes him happy. I have great respect for a man who is not afraid to admit when he’s wrong, can apologize with ease when the situation calls for it, and can take full responsibility for his own words and actions. A man who makes me feel safe and secure is high on my list and so is one who is complimentary and cannot take his eyes and hands off of me. Since I’m a highly sexual woman, filled with bad-girl thoughts, I require and desire a man who is really freaky, meaning very open-minded. I have few limitations, so I’m in search of a great friend, who has the same. Have no doubts, that I will be eager to fulfill your deepest, hidden fantasies. So don’t hold back with letting me know what you truly desire. I aim to please. Although I am open to different races, I must admit that white men, have been my preference for around the last 20 years. Ohhh…how I love the contrast between my skin and theirs. Yummy. Someone with a thirst for fun, who loves being out on the water is a huge plus. Especially if he has his own boat, big enough for fun, on or in, several parts of it. 😉 Just one of my many fantasies that I’d love to explore. Since I have an analytical mind that is well suited for business, I am looking for a very supportive man, who is not only interested in helping, but instrumental in assisting me get where I want and was born to go. I’m basically a goldmine in heels, so your being part in such a capacity, means that your net worth would increase tremendously over time. Yes, I am that confident in my ideas, skills, and execution. I know what I know and I do what I do. So I will only align myself, with a man who will cultivate my aspirations and share any expertise, that may apply. Talkers, can keep on walking. My special friend is a man of action! There’s so much more to discuss. So if I’ve described you well and your interest is piqued, then you might as well contact me. My schedule is pretty wide open for traveling and fun of all types, with a man who wants joy, lots of laughs, excitement, and vast amounts of affection in his life…and alllllll that comes with it. Let me be your stress reliever, your escape, and your inspiration. Doesn’t sound like a bad deal to me. So where are all of you Floridian yachtsman? Surely, one of you is looking for an awesome woman like me, for a super special friendship, beyond compare. I am only looking for a man who cares about me, as I would him. This will not be a robotic, fill-in the blanks type of relationship. It should be genuine and have meaning, even without it being a serious relationship. Anything less, would do us both an injustice. Please note, that once I make a real connection with someone terrific, that I would like for our 1st platonic meet-up to be by week 2 or 3, after some very detailed conversations. Friendship first, but if more comes from that, I would be elated. Surely, you would be too.

FlyBoysays:

I was Josh lol

Joshsays:

For those who are wondering @CollegeGirl is one of my proxies. 😉

flyRsays:

@ cheapoBsturd – If you wandered through and around the mountain of posts from the frequent posters you would have found two of mine from yesterday addressing the specific issue of show money – to me it is absolutely disqualifying,.,,,,, period. If both do not see enough potential in the initial meet to put forth the effort then there’s nothing there worthy of a meet.

@Josh any chance you’re still looking for someone? I love reading your posts and I feel like we would get along very well. lol. just curious.

Joshsays:

Hello proxy. 😉

Dazed-SDsays:

@SB’s here is a profile that goes to one @FunDudes point, “I’m not looking for anything serious as I am in a relationship however I am looking for fun and a good time with someone who shares the same interests as me!” expectations = Moderate !

It’s probably a lot worse than anything you can conjure up hahaha. It you’re bored, google ‘male chastity’

GeorgiaPeachsays:

@Josh
I think I’m your proxy, again. 😉

MissLadysays:

nope @ Josh not even word gymnastics, just curious about the convenient semantics being used for a ‘slut’. Sleeping with ‘loser dudes’ doesn’t make you a banged out slut, it just means you were stupid and got nothing out of the deal.

Fundudesays:

@miss

More desirable from a paying money standpoint.

If I know a chick got banged out for free, I’m less likely to part with money

Catcher-22says:

@GeorgiaPeach and @24: Thank you for your insightful analyses of FunDude’s pathetic and mean-spirited diatribe postings. Heaven only knows how a supposed medical doctor coulld have such lame opinions and outlook. Posters like @KennaKenna represent the bright side of this blog and the SA lifestyle Posters like FunDude represent the opposite, dark side.

Joshsays:

@MissLady

“-so does that make her the slut with money??”

No that makes her SB with money.

Sweetheart, if you think that you are going to play this word gymnastics game with the @Guru with any level of success, then you will have to taste some of @Guru’s semen. @Guru may let you win just to boost your self esteem. 😉

Run Lolasays:

@Josh

My main photo doesn’t show my face but here /member/e1f6353d/view

Anyway, I don’t think it’s in the interest of a lot of SD’s on the site to admit the arrangement I had is possible. I have girls frequently coming to me under the impression that they have to put out on their first date and accept whatever pennies get thrown their way. It’s in the interest of PUA’s and other salty dudes to perpetuate that idea.

Men who go on endlessly about how it’s ‘supposed to work’ when trying to get their way are just too greedy to admit that they and the SB they’re speaking to aren’t good fit. It works however it works, that’s the beauty (and fun) of an arrangement.

MissLadysays:

@FunDude so that means that the banged out SB is desirable cause she got paid….

MissLadysays:

@Josh The latter may have more money in her bank account?
-so does that make her the slut with money??

@Promise A banged out slut is looking for a commitment now that they’re used goods
-as it was being used here, they weren’t looking for a ‘commitment’ just a SD. What makes her so much more ‘undesirable’ than the SB that did the same number of SD’s….because she got money along with sexual gratification??

I thought these women were all “equal”? You implicitly confirmed my previous comments

@miss

The difference is the banged out sb is getting paid. The other one is broke and used lol

GeorgiaPeachsays:

@Fundude
And exactly how do you know I’m not a proxy for someone else? You may look at my profile here and see and older, larger lady, but the question is… Is that REALLY me or perhaps the real me is one of those 22 yr old SYT’s that is beautiful, educated and can see right through you? Hmmmmm 😉

FatB'StardSA Proxysays:

@FlyR

“But FD, Josh et al please keep up the good work, with my sincere thanks for sending them my way…….”

Do you really do think your fucked up stories about soccer balls and empty wagons gives you an edge over SD’s like @FunDude? A meet and greet allowance with you is really danger pay for the SB to offset the high chance she will want to off herself half way through dinner.

Yes, can someone tell me what the difference is between a banged out ‘slut’ who fucked a bunch of “bad” dudes or a banged out SB that’s juggling the same number of SD’s??

FlyBoysays:

You know Promise I looked at that dress and everybody is saying it’s blue and black, no, no, no, it’s white and gold. I think the whole world went colorblind because the dress is CLEARLY Orange and Green!!!!

Cheers

flyRsays:

and FD just so you do not spend nights worrying about me, my SB is well under 25, intelligent, low mileage, on a high velocity professional trajectory, appreciates a modest allowance but more so being treated like a partner rather than a sperm dumpster for a guy in an Ebola suit, hating himself for his weaknesses and fleeing back to his basement at the moment of completion.

No sir, I would not. And I would be livid if that misrepresentation resulted in damage to my baby! Thankfully in the last year, I had only one static wick damaged!

Cheers

Joshsays:

““Spanky” was the president of the “He Man Woman Hater’s Club,””

Good one @GeorgiaPeach…Hahahahahaha!!!

GeorgiaPeachsays:

@FunDude
“Standards” according to whom?

Ladies…SB’s:
I’ve been here a several weeks, long enough to read through much of “FunDude’s” diatribe of crap. FYI. He says he’s a doctor, but I have no idea which field. I would suspect perhaps some type of anesthesiologist or perhaps even a “podiatrist” from the way he talks. He wants everyone to know that he is a highly “educated” guy since he likes to dish out possible medical prescriptions for things like nausea, etc. and talk “numbers, stats and investment info” with other SD’s here. He also says he makes a great deal of money; but obviously there is no way to prove that. He tries hard to fit in with the “big” boys here who are indeed, likely highly educated and very good investors, financial guys, etc. who make a lot of money. Oh, also, he says he’s is ONLY 35 yrs old and he’s quite handsome. But most important, I suppose for this website is that he tells us, as females, how much we all disgust him, except for those “chosen” few woman, who are in their early 20’s with beautiful bodies and highly educated brains. As the “other” females here, we are to be jealous and throw our arms down and worship FunDude for what he is and what he says.

The reality is that he reminds me of the old movie, “Our Gang.” (Google if you’re not familiar) Specifically, FunDude could easily be the character, “Spanky.” “Spanky” was the president of the “He Man Woman Hater’s Club,” in this group of young boys. (Notable characters Alfalfa and Buckwheat were also members of this club.) Spanky earned his knick name from his mom, according to lore. (It is said that the nickname reminded him to be good so that he would not get spanked…. Or in this case, let’s just not go there.) I think the title of that club says a great deal about FunDude and he seems to fit the part perfectly.

Now, with this information, it makes me wonder what FunDude actually requires for a SB. I think what he really needs is the kind of woman who will stand up to his “bratty, self-centered, know-it-all” attitude. His sense of entitlement is overwhelming and his arrogance is simply unbelievable. With as much disgust as FunDude, (aka Spanky) seems to have for most women; I truly believe that he should receive all that he dishes out.

Joshsays:

@Run Lola

Post your profile id and we will tell you if we believe your tale. 😉

Joshsays:

@flyR

“But FD, Josh et al please keep up the good work, with my sincere thanks for sending them my way…”

I can’t speak for @FunDude, but do you think I discuss what I post on the blog with women I communicate with on SA?

You are gaming women on SA with your own style of game. You may deny that you are gaming them–just like women deny their games–but you are. And I have no problem with your game, and more power to you.

Sometimes one has to overpay to reduce the negotiation/transaction time. It does not make him a better human being…just smart with his time in a given situation.

For example, say you need wheels because you are suddenly transportationless. You can haggle on the last $500 with the salesperson or his manager, or save time by sacrificing that $500 on top of the $X you know you have to spend regardless. If you had a spare car or two, you may not want to spend that $500, but since you are transportationless, you do spend that $500 extra.

Another example…you can complain about high parking fees in Manhattan, or pay up the garage fee to save yourself from parking ticket hassle. You can avoid the whole situation by taking public transport in the city.

It is all about options. Since neither @FunDude nor @FlyBoy nor @Suiter nor @RookieSD nor me currently have the pussy problem, so we are going to play it by our rules. If any of us got into a pussy shortage, I am sure that he would bend the rules to fix that problem. 😉

Joshsays:

@flyR

“But FD, Josh et al please keep up the good work, with my sincere thanks for sending them my way…”

I can’t speak for @FunDude, but do you think I discuss what I post on the blog with women I communicate with on SA?

You are gaming women on SA with your own style of game. You may deny that you are gaming them–just like women deny their games–but you are. And I have no problem with your game, and more power to you.

Sometimes one has to overpay to reduce the negotiation/transaction time. It does not make him a better human being…just smart with his time in a given situation.

For example, say you need wheels because you are suddenly transportationless. You can haggle on the last $500 with the salesperson or his manager, or save time by sacrificing that $500 on top of the $X you know you have to spend regardless. If you had a spare car or two, you may not want to spend that $500, but since you are transportationless, you do spend that $500 extra.

Another example…you can complain about high parking fees in Manhattan, or pay up the garage fee to save yourself from parking ticket hassle. You can avoid the whole situation by taking public transport in the city.

It is all about options. Since neither @FunDude nor @FlyBoy nor @Suiter nor @RookieSD nor me currently have the pussy problem, so we are going to play it by our rules. If any of us got into the pussy shortage, I am sure that he would bend the rules to fix that problem. 😉

FunDudesays:

@FlyR

No problem. I hope you can take all the BBWs, over 30s, banged out women, etc.

We need some chump to pay for them.

Run Lolasays:

I think everyone on the site should remember that the vast majority of the people on this planet are utterly unbangable, let alone worth dating–sugar or otherwise. Finding exactly what you’re looking for takes time. I’ve met a handful of SD’s from the site and only two didn’t assume we were going to bang when we met or shortly after. In fact my best experience involved an SD who I spoke to on skype first and got to know him and then, without me having to ask, he offered to send me a bit of money to ‘help out with expenses’ for the month. Neither of us said a number and simply thanked him for the gesture. I woke up nearly 1K euros richer.

That is far from the usual experience here, I know. But when someone (who I get along with very well) is immediately willing to put up that kind of money without demanding anything from me, it tells me that they can afford an arrangement and aren’t likely to try and nickel and dime me to death.

In my experience, any pot worth my time has brought up the money before I needed to ask and has been very generous very early on. If you have to wring a couple hundred dollars from a guy he’s a salt or just doesn’t find you worth the time. Either way that makes him not worth yours.

tldr: please, for the love of god, stop agreeing to sex for 1.50 and a cheeseburger happy meal. You’re bringing down the property value.

FunDudesays:

@Pure

I see nothing “hateful” in my comments.

Its called STANDARDS dear.

Are you a 22y/o banged out slut? Why do you call yourself that?

PureSinsays:

@fundude
Well that’s what I’m gathering after reading your last few comments. You’ve got to give the misogyny rest. nothing wrong with being critical or harsh but you seem hateful. Lol But what do I know I’m just a 22 yr old “banged out slut”

FlyBoysays:

@Josh, agreed if one has only a few assets. However if one has made his fortune before marriage and lives in a state where prenups hold, then two sets of lawyers paid for by him is all that is needed. One set advocating for him and the other advocating for her, can produce an iron clad prenup.

Of course, he can always tell her that this is a business insurance requirement. Most of the time it’s true.

I am enjoying your shaming language and crazy outbursts. Your argument is illogical (like all angry feminists) but you continue to persist in your insanity.

Bravo dear uncommon SB proxy.

24says:

Like what Peeps said, Fundude is a psychopath/narcissist who would rather spend his Friday night chopping up a woman’s body and throwing her in the ocean instead of paying for dinner on a romantic date. Fundude always posts about how much he hates what sugar babies bring to the table. What do YOU bring to the table as a SD, Fundude? Unless you have a 12” c0ck and amazing tongue game, you’re not bringing anything since you lack $$ or sweetness. She can get sex from a younger guy on POF who will have sex with her free also. I fear for the day you activate your account again. I fear for the women you’ll strangle to death during sex (if you ever get a woman that far..)

Josh, the vibe I get is that you put all the blame on women. Do women sabotage relationships? Yes, they can. Do men act stupid and then deflect? Yes, they do. I don’t see you chopping up bodies like Fundude, but you’d be a terror to date for the deflecting you do. I could see you telling your significant other during childbirth that the pain isn’t so bad and she should stop screaming.

I just don’t understand.. if you don’t want to help support a woman and just “pump and dump”, go on POF or Tinder. You keep saying the selection pool on SA is dwindling. If you want a virgin who has never been touched by another man, go to ChristinMingle and manipulate her. You don’t belong on SeekingArrangements. Not helping with her bills or even mentoring is like going to BlackPlanet when you are a white guy. You are not their demographic.

I view an arrangement as a relationship where you do care about the well being for the SB, so you fund her future. You help with her bills. Believe it or not, Fundude, some men do get pleasure helping people. However, it is about being in the “honeymoon phase”. There should be no drama or nagging when it comes to SD/SB dating. Do ugly women on SA ask for too much allowance? Yes, but that’s their prerogative. At the same time, ugly men on SA think they are entitled to beautiful women for free because in their mind, they look and feel “20 years younger”. And God forbid gold diggers exist on a sugar baby website!

I actually think that there is potential for some higher quality younger SBs on here that aren’t sluts. I agree that SA might be one of the best places to find that.

FlyBoysays:

With all due respect gentlemen, money should never be used to enhance the quality of women you get. If you think you are not getting what you want, then work on your game.

And believe me guys when I tell you that the 9s and 10s are on Instagram getting offers of 20-30K for a weekend. I myself would not have any of them, even for free. Why? Let’s say, on those weekends they get peed on, shat on, made to fuck dogs … etc etc … Read the web.

Super hot girls can only be fucked using douchebag game. If they choose money, then they are certainly out your league and definitely out my taste. That’s the stark truth.

Correct. If you ever want to see how much SB as well as SD vitriol I had to put up with when I was the only one posting what I still post now, see the blog comments from one year ago. 😉

FlyBoysays:

Ironically in these deranged times we live in, if you are looking for a wife, SA might be one of the best places to search.

It’s counterintuitive but a young girl that knows her value, hence she is on SA early in her life, is not likely to have been drilled up the ass while being chocked by a bunch of losers. A slut knows she is worthless and therefore can not play this game, at least until her thirties when she can try to fake it and hope that a beta would bite.

That’s why one finds so many virgins in this place. They looking for husbands!!!

Conclusion: Come to SA, Fuck the sluts and where you are done, marry one of the good ones. Win-win.

How about my proxy from a different ip address? That’ll be instantly believable by the blog crowd. Hahahahaha!!!

FunDudesays:

@Suiter

We need more SDs on here like you. True alpha male mentality.

@Fly

He didn’t say he’s opposed to an “allowance”. He is saying she better be attractive and young enough to warrant it.

Whats the point of an allowance?

Lets discuss everyone’s perspective.

To me, an allowance allows me to significantly UPGRADE without much effort/drama. That is what I am paying for.

To obtain a very attractive 23 y/o female would require significant effort normally. It would require significant “game” and “effort” to attract a hot woman 12 years younger than me. An “allowance” allows me to achieve this with no “game playing” or expenditure of significant “effort” on my part. The money is worth it because the “effort and game playing” costs me opportunity costs anyway.

I am a 35 y/o male who is in pretty good shape (Squat about 400 when doing max lifts, deadlift about 300-400, bench about 270 to 300 although usually only do 240lbs by dumbells instead of barbells). I make a decent living with a decent profession.

Why would I pay an allowance for women for women in their 30s, BBWs, etc? Illogical.

And in general there are a lot of women on this site that would literally have to pay ME for me to date them let alone sleep with them lol

Suitersays:

@Peeps – you are absolutely correct and I listed that in my comment above. You pay if you are ugly, old, want something kinky, or are married. Even then though if I were married and in my 30s or 40s and was going to pay, I’d be getting the hottest 21 year old over some regular 35 year old

Suitersays:

@FlyBoy – I never said I would not do it on principle. At least not across the board. I have entered into arrangements with two women one was absolutely stunning, she was 29 and genuinely looked more like 24 but it fizzled quickly due to lack of real chemistry. And then more recently another very beautiful 22 year old but I had to change course due to some life changes. I’ve met enough 30+ women on the site that are fine without being paid that I don’t have any issue at all using it for that purpose. If everyone I was meeting was insisting on that I’d have just stopped using it. But as it stands for me it has been a great site for finding women 30+ for casual dating

peepssays:

One comment re: allowances, there are a lot of openly married men on this website, I hear @fundude and @josh but you are not married… and in that instance, it makes no sense for a woman to sleep with a married man for no reason. As someone said on an article once, what SDs are really buying is freedom.

peepssays:

One comment re: allowances, there are a lot of openly married men on this website, I hear @fundude and @josh but you are not married… and in that instance, it makes no sense for a woman to sleep with a married man for no reason.

All self respecting men follow your advice.

Only really socially awkward dudes, really older, really ugly, etc would pay allowances to the types of women you are mentioning.

Bravo sir!

Suitersays:

@FlyBoy – yeah I really don’t give a sh*t if some 35 year old gets upset getting a nice free dinner to find out I’m not going to allowance them. If someone is stupid/arrogant enough to be that way I really don’t care.

And only one – she came to my town from another city a couple of hours away I did cover her travel expenses. I was not going to sleep with her she seemed a bit crazy but she wanted me to come to the room. She definitely seemed very disappointed I didn’t want to pursue arrangement. All the rest have been very cool, in most cases have wanted to meet up for more banging later.

Another good tell that someone is not set on allowance is if you see them on Match or OKC too. I now cross reference by searching the same age / location and sometimes using things like height and hair color to narrow it down.

How you can change his world

How he can change your world-

Suggest the next step –

Promisesays:

My spelling and grammar’s a little off today! :O

RookieSDsays:

@Josh

“The honeymoon period is when women stay in their crazy phase, which is bearable and even pleasurable. However, when the honeymoon period is over, the acting period expires, the mask comes out, and women go batshit crazy.
My courtship goal is to engage with a woman while the honeymoon period lasts, then move on to the next. I am not too much into one-night stands as there is a lot more of potential honeymoon period left in that engagement…unless she turns batshit crazy the morning after.”

Damn, this is like right out of my playbook. Are you my brother from another mother?

I actually have no problem with your approach, although some girls might complain that you got them to come out before you told them that you view SA as a dating site. But, love, war .. etc lol

Cheers

Suitersays:

I will add I have had several women who have been the ones to make a move on me… like just coming out bluntly and saying “can we get a hotel” or “can we go back to your place”. If a woman comes on to me and I find her remotely attractive and she offers up like that I’m not going to decline and I am certainly not going to offer any $s

Suitersays:

@FlyBoy – maybe a little bit of both lol. I am pretty open with anyone older that I am not going to pay an allowance though I might not pro-actively bring it up. I will normally say something along the lines of “I’ve found that for many people our age they use this as a regular dating site” and then if it’s clear they still want sex I play along. I always of course pick up the tab, take them to nice places, and I can be pretty charming.

I never claimed SA is like Match or POF or OKC. Match is where you go for love, POF and OKC are where really freaking ugly women can hook up with anybody because of the ratios. SA evens the playing field. I may not be hugely rich but my income is like 3x the average in my zip code which is one of the highest averages in the country so I’m not poor either but that does not come through on other dating sites. I met one chick, I hung with her at her house a couple of times, she said she used SA because everyone she met on Match was “under employed and under achieving” and she just wanted to meet guys who could actually pay for a dinner once in a while.

And as I have said if you are 21, very attractive and have a charming personality…. well that is something worth investing in as otherwise she’s not going to be dating a regular guy in his 30s or 40s

FlyBoysays:

@flyr,

beauty
time
attitude
sensuality

Beauty, attitude and sensuality are all subjective criteria. Time on the other is objective. If I want to break Wednesday and go to Aspen for a long weekend, a first class SB should be ready to meet me at the airport within an hour. And that my friend requires a hefty allowance that would enable her to prioritize you above all else. This is the only reason for high allowances; time exclusivity.

Cheers

FlyBoysays:

Suiter, do you tell them that you are not giving them anything ahead of time? Or do you pretend that you are Mr Big and try to fuck the stupid ones who can not see it.

Look, all is fair in love and war, but don’t tell us you can do on Match or POF, what you can do on SA. The reason being, is that SA has rich men whom you are trying to impersonate and stupid girls who fall for it.

I do not filter on age, but I would filter on “desired age” if that was an option. That might eliminate 99% of the SB’s by itself for an old geezer in a mobility chair like myself (lol).

flyRsays:

Re Search Statistics

It’s very possible that between inactive for two weeks and inactive for two months are:

those who have found someone

those who have moved the interviewing process off SA

too busy

discouraged

I’ve found some great prospects in the greater than two weeks / less than 6 months category. A very short note acknowledging that they have not been active but that you are interested brings a response in about 20% of the cases. The difference is that the reply is coming from someone who is interested. There’s also the person who is in a relationship that is deteriorating (I think I saw somewhere that the average relationship is about 6 months).

For the SB the default search presentation is by last profile update so you want to make an update every few weeks just to stay at the top of the list.

@ FlyBoy “Allowances are not about beauty, they are about time.” I would expand that to

Allowances are about
beauty
time
attitude
sensuality

But the real key is that allowances are about filling a missing gap in the SD’s life , whatever that may be from someone hanging from a meathook for the frustrated cellardweller to someone to make the titan of commerce squirm like the useless doormat he craves to be.

Hopefully it’s more along the lines of
simple, shared pleasures
revisiting an earlier, more pleasure oriented life (perhaps missed)
not having to hear the most dreaded words ” Honey I have been thinking”
Starting an evening knowing it is going to end very well
Being with someone who has a positive outlook on life
Knowing that they are appreciated

I’m reminded of this frequently when I take a break and have a late breakfast at a little cafe on Montana in Santa Monica. It’s the time the “housewives of north of montana come from the gym for coffee” . Their children are down at the Palisades park in the care of nannys, most of whom are on their cell phones or talking in Spanish to their friends, ignoring the children. So many of the conversations between the women are sharing their complaints about their husbands, trading information about their favorite trainers or their newest purchases. While their bodies may be toned there is a hardness in their faces and talk that’s somewhat repulsive.

What these women don’t understand is that within 25 miles there are more than 100 women on SA (online at this moment) 18-30, moderate or lower allowance, athletic or slim . About 450 have been online within 24 hours. Using Santa Monica as the search center, about 40% of the 25 mile circle is water so the density is even higher.

Suitersays:

It is definitely true that as a guy on the site the things that are going to make you have to pay are: being ugly, socially awkward, being married, being old, wanting certainly fetishes satisfied. If however you are a single, (relatively) younger guy with his shit together it is a great casual dating site. I only had one 37 year old mention an allowance and I literally had to laugh.

I search by zip code and have about a 2k of potential SB’s in a 50 mile radius twice that in 100. The SD population is roughly half that. It’s enough for plenty of action, but at any given time there are by my guess no more than 1-3 women who have a realistic shot of getting a good stable arrangement with allowance with a guy that doesn’t have any of the issues I list above.

I have no interest whatsoever in P2P. Generally the outcome with women I have met on SA is we’ve become fk buddies/fwbs, or never see each other again, or I have with a very small number had an arrangement.

@resop
I didn’t see your latest response before posting mine.

ErikTheRedsays:

Invalid* silly phone. LOL

ErikTheRedsays:

@resop

What subjective filter are you using? Girls open to lesbianism? Not saying that is unvalid, but you seem to be deliberately cooking small numbers

DC is a city with less than 700k people, even with 25mile radius, at 10k per square mile (DC city population density, which is higher than the suburbs), that’s only slightly over 1 Million people. Or translating to 100-150 paying SD memberships in each month, assuming no one outside the US pays and no SB pays.

FunDudes assessment is spot on, but I’m afraid it’s irrelevant in a casual regime such sugar.

Wifing up a slut is a No No.

Making a slut your Fuck buddy or SB .. is OK … Yes? lol

Cheers

resop2says:

Stats for a random big city: Washington DC – 10 mile radius:

Total number of SB profiles in a 25 mile radius (no filtering): 3803
Total number of SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 852
Total number of filtered SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 215

In this case, the “retention” rate is slightly higher than rural areas (22 verses 20 percent) but the survival rate of my filter is still only 20 percent.

ErikTheRedsays:

18-25*

ErikTheRedsays:

@resop,

I’m using my phone, and I’m afraid I don’t have the time to count through dozens if not hundreds of pages. We can get a rough estimate a different way: SA boasts an annual revenue of about 25mil, let’s assume all of it coming from the US. I’m in a city of 600k people, or 2/1000 of US population (just over 300mil), so by averaging about 50k of SA revenue comes out of my city annually. That translates to about 60-100 SD paying membership in any given month, even assuming all revenue comes from the lowest paying membership, no one pays diamond member, no SB pays any paid membership, and nobody outside the US pays Amy paid membership. In other words, the 60-100 in any given month is overestimating; the real head count for paying SD for an average 600k people city is probably less than 50. They are the only ones able to read messages from the 150+ active SB’s in the last 24 hours alone! Quite a few paying SD’s are probably on 6 month plans that have resulted in steady relationship for the time being and no longer searching or reading messages. Likewise the SB’s in steady relationships are not searching either. The 150 SB’s are active in the last 24 hours alone and between 18-28. Real active SD’S are only a subset of the 50.

Joshsays:

I don’t think that I have “standards” as stringent as @FunDude’s in terms of a woman’s looks or how banged up she is. I do prefer the “window of engagement” with women also known as the honeymoon period.

The honeymoon period is when women stay in their crazy phase, which is bearable and even pleasurable. However, when the honeymoon period is over, the acting period expires, the mask comes out, and women go batshit crazy.

My courtship goal is to engage with a woman while the honeymoon period lasts, then move on to the next. I am not too much into one-night stands as there is a lot more of potential honeymoon period left in that engagement…unless she turns batshit crazy the morning after.

FlyBoysays:

I would have a lot of respect for those who think that the girls on here ought to sleep with them for nothing, just because they have their shit together and will pay for the dates .. etc

I said I’ll have respect for them only if they put this in their profile:

=================================================================
Hey there, I noticed a lot good looking lizards on the site and that’s why I signed up. However, since I am not a 300lb Ogre with a hump, I ain’t paying no stinking allowance, period. So if you want a handsome guy with his shit together, then hit me up otherwise, Ta Ta whore.
=================================================================

Because if they didn’t do this, and instead were coy about their intention, then it would be the equivalent of fucking her with another guys dick. This I find so humiliatingly emasculating, I would not bear it no matter how good the pussy is.

The most “hateful” type of man are ones with STANDARDS.

This is one of the core premises of the feminist movement.

Men are NOT allowed standards or they are “hateful”

FunDudesays:

Men are literally being “shamed” into telling FAT women they are “attractive”. Men are being told to tell them that “real” women are “good looking”.

Men are being told that they should “man up and marry that slut”. He should ignore that she has been banged by tons of guys in her 20s. That is in the “past”. He should marry her, give her half his assets, etc because she is a “princess”.

This gynocentric world view is making men into simps that don’t look out for their OWN sexual interests.

Men need to be firm in their DEMANDS of women in the same manner WOMEN are towards men.

Women are allowed to have “standards” and they make sport of “complaining about men”. There are show dedicated towards speaking about men being “losers”.

its only “hateful” when MEN speak their desires BACK towards women. Men are supposed to take any used goods slut, BBW, older woman because they are “princesses” or “human beings”.

Men are never afforded this luxury of being a “human being” when women evaluate them.

resop2says:

@ErikTheRed: Sorry to burden you, but could you continue to click on the farthest page out on the bottom of the page until you get to SB’s who have been inactive for two weeks? Then to get the total number multiply the number of full pages (if you are on page 20 then there are 19 full pages) and then add the number of SB who have logged in within two weeks on the page.

Also I am sure that urban areas to have more SB’s than rural areas. I was trying to see if the ratios between the total, the active, and the active and suitable remained the same.

peepssays:

@josh

You, not really. With fundude there seems to be an almost pathological element, in the sense that he derives pleasure from putting women down. I have read everyone’s posts and even when many SDs are critical, I can sense the love for women many of the SDs that posted here have, how much they actually enjoy women and sex with women and so forth.

I honestly don’t get that from fundude. Again it’s not to say that he doesn
t get action, I believe him, but this is something I sense about him, like he is a borderline psycho/socialpath/narcissist. His REAL pleasure comes from control and humiliation.

@KennaKenna

You don’t look a day older than 19 to me. 😉

Joshsays:

@peeps

I am curious…do you think that I “hate” women as well?

peepssays:

@fundude

Just curious. Do you actually LIKE women? I do get the sense that you spend more time criticizing and hating on women than actually enjoying yourself in the company of women. I am not doubting that you get action, etc…but some of your posts have so much hate in them that it makes me wonder.

The engine stops are 10000. Before the engine stopped at 10000, the search revealed really “interesting” data in terms of total SA memberships for SDs and SBs. 😉

Promisesays:

@FunDude I honestly don’t understand how people are attracted to jocks. They honestly scare me. Especially the ones with huge arms. I honestly like some slight definition, but dang there’s a limit! Even though I’m not really old yet sometimes (once every few months) people tell me I look younger than my age.

The number of good SBs are VERY LOW.

However, you can’t filter the results and then claim the statistics are off. Furthermore, I’m sure urban areas have far more SBs.

FunDudesays:

@Promise

The key issue is determining the used goods sluts from the better women.

Most used goods sluts aren’t as stupid as “24” to let you know they have about 200,000 miles on the odometer. They will definitely try to downplay that aspect of their lives now that they are looking for a “serious relationship”.

I can usually tell a woman is a used goods slut from her previous dating history.

I appear very “open minded” about the issue pretending I won’t be “judgmental” on our first “date”. You’d be surpirsed how fast they open up to you without even realizing it.

I recently went on a “coffee” date with a CPA who supposedly made 200K per year (previously worked for Deloitte). She was in her 30s. I was told she was very attractive, looked “younger than her age”,educated, etc. They told me to “give her a chance” despite her age.

Things that I determined from our interaction:

1) They almost NEVER look YOUNGER than their age. Almost every woman is told she looks at least “5 to 10 years younger”. Let me tell you, she looked every bit her age. Sure she was thin and in good shape but definitely looked like a woman in her mid 30s.

2) She opened up about her dating past. After “innocently” asking her about he previous dating experiences, she told me that she previously dated “jocks with no money” for the last 8 to 10 years. She has grown “bored of those types of guys and now needs a real man”. Translation: She got banged in every orifice by multiple broke men for FREE and now wants me to pay for her used goods ass.

She wanted a guy in “good shape but also with money”. Her EXPECTATIONS actually INCREASED despite her declining SMP/MMP due to her age plus used goods status.

If she had a long term relationship for 8 to 10 years with an educated engineer, physician, etc that “broke apart” that would be very different. She might be redeemable at that point. However, it would still be an uphill battle due to her age.

3) I highly doubt she was making 200K per year anymore. She had given up her CPA job at Deloitte (which is 60 to 70 hour work weeks) where she probably did make 200K/year for a job in Western MI near her family to work 3 days/week from “home”.

Translation: She didn’t want to work hard and wanted some chump to pay her bills.

Conclusion: I debated if I would just use her as a pump or dump after stringing her along or just forget it. I decided it wasn’t even worth the pump and dump, even though that would be easy to achieve.

I am so repulsed by these women, I don’t even want to have sex with most of them lol.

resop2says:

Some interesting statistics:

Total number of SB profiles in a 25 mile radius (no filtering): 155
Total number of SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 34
Total number of filtered SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 11

Therefore in this limited set, only 1 in 15 of the SB profiles are “suitable” and “active”. If we are to believe that there is an 8:1 ratio of SB’s to SD’s then within a 25 mile radius we would expect around 20 or SD. So, we would expect two SD’s for each active “suitable” SB (if every SD had the same taste).

If this result repeatable for a larger set?

Total number of SB profiles in a 100 mile radius (no filtering): 2006
Total number of SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 407
Total number of filtered SB profiles that have been visited in two weeks: 79

While the ratio of active to inactive profiles stays the same, the ratio of suitable to unsuitable profiles actually went down. (I must live in a lucky area?) In a 100 mile radius on 1 in 25 of the profiles are active and “suitable”. If there is a 8:1 ration of SB profiles to SD profiles in this area then the SD to suitable active SB profiles is 3:1.

Now, I live in a rural area which could bias the results. Are there SD’s who live in large or medium urban area who could repeat this test?

Ouch, a 20 year-old woman got a doctor on this one. Hahahahaha!!!

Promisesays:

But@ FunDude the more condoms you wear the more likely they are to break.

FunDudesays:

@PureSin

The only women I will consider an allowance for is a good looking, younger, non BBW female with some level of class.

If she is some younger slut that has been banged out by “bad boys”, she will only get p4p at most.

Older sluts like “24” will probably only get a quick pump and dump. She wouldn’t be worth much more than that. That is if I wore 5 condoms. Hell, I’d probably just NEXT her. Don’t want to get a disease.

Those special circumstances may include wanting to date significantly you get women, being physically undesirable in whatever capacity, being socially awkward, etc.

Suitersays:

This is an interesting post. I’ve been on SA for about 6 months now as an “SD” and this has been my conclusion. Should caveat this by saying I am a decent looking not stunning 40s something guy living in a smaller metropolitan area:

1) If you are over 30 there is ZERO chance of an allowance. I have found 90% of the women I have met on this site in this age range have just wanted to sleep with me anyway. It definitely operates as a filtered OKC in this age range, women get access to guys who are less likely to be a loser, men get a site with marginally better looking women and less guys competing

2) Just because you are under 30 does not mean you are attractive. I can find and date many women more attractive in my own age range than 80% of the women in the 18-29 year old age range on here

3) There are a lot of women on here with significant mental health issues

From all this the conclusion is if you are a reasonably mentally stable, young and attractive female you are a rarity and you have a shot at being able to negotiate an allowance. For everyone else this is just a dating site or a site where you are wasting your time entirely.

In my scenario though I’m a middle class, black man so that’s probably all I’d be attracting anyways.

Promisesays:

Idk, I feel like if I was a guy I’d perfer the banged out chick over the ghetto, ratchet, Sharkeisha 2.0 chick.

FlyBoysays:

@PureSin,

From my point of view, if you ask me for a 5K allowance just because you are beautiful, I’ll tell you to go fuck yourself. If on the other hand you tell me you want 5K because you will always be there for me, then yes.

@ fundude
“I don’t take them up on the “offer” because most of them are useless even for sex
Quality SBs that look for a reasonable allowance or an actual SB/SD “relationship” (rare breed)”

Lol!!!! Are you sure you like women at all? I’m curious to know what you deem as a reasonable allowance.

flyRsays:

@24 “” came here for SB/SD tips, not for your propaganda against sugar babies… like why are you even on this blog and website if you hate women and the idea of SB/SD dating? That was a rhetorical question.””

You need to understand that many here (probably a significantly higher % that in the overall SD population) are essentially looking for the combination arm candy/sperm dumpster SB. Not surprisingly there’s more smoke than fire.

If you are looking for tips

Be genuine
Understand what you want to achieve
Be realistic
Communicate your message to your target market and ignore the rest
Learn the art of rapid filtering and BS detection
Appreciate that it is a dynamic environment, potential arrangements are like sharks if they are not moving ahead they are dying
Understand that less that 5% have a perfect relationship so be prepared to prioritize what’s important and identify what’s unacceptable.
Communicate carefully, accurately and consistently.
Like most businesses the foundation of failure is usually marketing or the lack thereof
Your profile should be as perfect as your physical and mental preparation for a critical interview. Do the profile in word , speil and grammar check, let sit for 6 hours and review. Also update . Understand that SD may use keyword search. Details matter, pictures are everything but 2-4 pictures max. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
Don’t reward bad behavior
Ask yourself at each level of involvement why am I here and why is this SD here