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Reality Bites Right Now for This Pennsylvania Man

How do you explain a night where you end up naked, covered in blood, and chewing on another human being? 20-year-old Richard Cimino Jr. is doing his best to piece together the events of last Friday night, where he drove his car off the road, stripped down to his underwear and broke into two homes in Hawley, PA. Once inside the second home, he freed himself from his underwear and inexplicably jumped from the second floor window, severely injuring his arms and legs.

That didn't stop him. After exiting through the home's garage, he spotted two women on the street. He tackled one of them, then "began to gnaw" on her head while shrieking like an animal. The women escaped and called the police, and naturally, Cimino tried to fight the cops, who deployed the stun gun. Even in a state of disarray, he managed to punch a medical technician.

He was charged with two counts each of aggravated assault, simple assault, indecent exposure, and criminal mischief. Additional charges include three counts of burglary, one count each of criminal trespass and defiant trespassing. Police aren't sure if he was on drugs, but that's a pretty safe bet. Either that, or he's a comic book waiting to happen.