It's been a while that I am having problems to focus. I mean, I see alright….I might not aim well, but the eye sight is good. It's mental focus, not visual focus what I am referring to. Not that I ever was a model for concentration, I have always been a little distracted, but really lately I am not capable of starting AND finishing something…

I must have lost the habit, or maybe I am not as demanding as I was, but any how I always make up all the excuses in order to dedicate my attention to something else. At work, this is a tragedy, it is like sitting on a spiky chair, I can't focus for more than 10 minutes, then I have to check my emails (work, private) even if I know from the notification alerts I haven't received any new ones. I have to rest my eyes, say. Then I check the phone. Not that anyone ever calls me or texts me. For days I mean. And I know it. Still, that compulsive gesture of checking anyway, because you never know. I could just terminate my contract, seriously, since my handset is silent for weeks. Oh well, brain needs to rest once in a while, I have to get some distraction…

Even starting and write those few lines here, it took me days…I type a word, then I check the weather forecast, two more words then I stand and look outside the window, then I get back to write but I have lost my inspiration. So I decide and do yoga, to relax, so I get up to go change and I find myself nibbling on some snack, then I am pervaded by this wish to play my ukulele. I strum for five minutes and I realize I am no player, so I give up and I go prepare dinner….it wasn't like this before. Before I sat and spend hours, type type type, meaningful sentences, elaborate, organize, words. I mean, I finished what I started.

OK now, don't think I am a bum, it's not that…I'd rather say I have a "selective focus". Example, provided that I get the inspiration, I write a lot. Because I like writing. When I cook, I am focused. Because I love to cook. If I read, I can read for hours. When I sit next to a handsome and smart man, oh, I am so focused!

OK, you get the point…

But anyhow, this lack of focus shall not be underestimated. I know one can learn to concentrate. After all, it comes down to practice, it is discipline and dedication. The lazy and the undisciplined don't like making any effort to meet their goals. The former prefer to give up, the latter prefer not to give a f….

So, here are some points to learn and concentrate:

1-Focus on one thing. Right, once can't do much when trying to do many things at a time. Confucius used to say "He who chases two rabbits catches none".

2-Eliminate known distractions. There. Phones, social networks, stuff. Must go. Use only during free time. FREE time.

3-Calm the mind (meditate). Yeah, thank you very much. Had it been simple….

6-Clarification of goals. Ah, stating the obvious. A not well defined goal is no goal.

7-Simplify. Again, obvious. The more complicated the goal, the less motivation to reach it.

OK, so far so damn obvious. I knew this even without consulting books or internet, I mean, no psychology degree required. OK, then, why is it so damn difficult? I guess it is then a matter of laziness, not lack of concentration. Here there's no motivation to put those simple rules in practice.

Even more discipline-oriented the following points from a different source:

1-get your rest

2-make a plan

3-eat light and healthy

4-exercise

5-take breaks and mixup the environment

Hm, the first four points have their own basis. Trivial. But…isn't the last point introducing a "distraction" factor? Sure, a small amount of chaos is necessary, same as take a break and have a cup of tea after staring at the pc monitor for too long…

OK, I know what to do then. I pick up again yoga, running, workout. I will cook my meals for the office, I clean my desk and I keep a list with the objectives of the day. Right. Body, execute!

See? That, that's the root of all problems: my head is giving the correct orders, it is the body that is not executing…hocus pocus, hocus pocus focus come to me!

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Stockholm: city full of tall and beautiful people, city spread on 14 islands ( while the islands making the whole archipelago are some 50000), rich in green and water. Many call Stockholm the Venice of the north, and it is not the only one to carry that appellation, if you think of Amsterdam and Bruges….let me tell you, there can't be wronger association. Venice is split between mainland and laguna; the laguna is where the old maritime center developed, its shallow waters sometimes recall a moldy pond, and Venice island is in the middle, its houses built on wood and mold. Stockholm has no canals, to start with. Then there is sea, Baltic sea, and all those above counted islands, that must have caused a big headache when it came to define the nation's borders…so don't call the city another Venice, because it's not. By far. With all due respect, people, Venice is surely beautiful and I recommend, but we are comparing an archipelago to a laguna…

Figuring out how public transport works was easy, and creating a mental map of the city center was even easier. It took me a few hours to memorize places, so that I didn't need to use a tourist map at all. Different story if you are sailing through the islands…That said, I also was in company most of the times, so even in case I could have hesitated, friends would cover up for me.

The best thing that Stockholm has to offer is the archipelago, and a must-do is booking one of the zillion boat tours that will show you another side of the north capital. I did jump on a boat, and I experienced not only a tour of the natural beauties, but I also learned a lot during the afternoon aboard. I did learn that residents in Vaxholm island (popular summer vacation destination) have the highest salaries of Sweden, that some birds are quite nasty with their droppings all over the place, that Stockholm, too, has a very ugly looking tower of telecommunications (but with a nice view, I was told), that border disputes between Denmark and Sweden were one small island away…this thing of virtually cross-swim the border puzzles and at the same time amazes me. I received a nice explanation about the symbol of the three crowns (tre kronor) found on everything that's considered of national interest (money, emblems, buildings, and so on), to signify the old kingdom of Scandinavia made of Sweden, Norway and Denmark. The prettiest thing of all was the sky: fluffy, small clouds were like aligned on an invisible horizontal plane, just right here, above my head, so close that I could have stretched and touched them. No matter the angle I watched them from, they would slide on their plane and follow me.

If boats are not your thing, then there are many alternative ways to set off and explore…walk, hop-on hop-off buses, trams, ferries that take you anywhere your curiosity drags you to. And in summer, daylight lasts until late, buying you more time to indulge in sightseeing. You can visit the quiet and green suburbs, the trendy area of Södermalm with its unique and charming boutiques and cafes, the royal garden island of Djurgården, where you can find a beautiful rose garden (Rosendal), an open air museum (Skansen) and other royal buildings and more museums, you should have a stroll in Gamla Stan, the old city center, made of narrow streets, tall and thin buildings, souvenir shops restaurants and cafes, check out the city center and its shopping streets and lively spots. Don't miss out on all their wonderful, salivation-at-a-glance-inducing cakes, try everything that contains their delicious forest berries, try a real cinnamon roll (no imitations), visit a nice restaurant with a garden and a view.

Churches bell towers with their pointing roofs, recalling some gothic, typical, north European style stretch high, so high that to take a picture of the whole building I had to be on a different island. I believe the best angle to look at the whole city would be from an air balloon, because it floats low enough to allow you to have a clear view of the tiny things, and high enough to allow you to take it all in, in just one breath.

I liked Stockholm very much. I liked that I could just walk and see art and beauty around (even the subway stations were artwork), that I could hang out with friends day and night. I liked that art and culture is everywhere, that people eat their meals outside -weather allowing, that I can sit at a bench and watch people..it's a very interesting world, the one made of passers-by…

I think I suffer of Stockholm syndrome: I developed love feelings for it. Oh, well, I shall return. Soon.

It's nice to go back home during summer time, because I can feel the Mediterranean atmosphere tickle all pores. Friends are on vacation too, maybe I can meet them for once, by chance, by accident, or randomly. All those good and fresh stuff like ice creams, granita, just fished fish based meals. NIghts out watching people playing volleyball tournaments, various other events. Suntan and sand, that feeling of freedom…Every season has its own colors and flavor, its own habits and perfumes, its own rhythms and schedules. But for a sea creature as I am, the call of summer is like for Ulysses the singing of mermaids, so once I arrived I set up for two weeks of laziness. Big reunions were a constant for this trip: cousins visiting from Buenos Aires brought my father's side of the family together; an exceptionally rich porcini mushroom picking was the perfect occasion to renew the tradition of getting together with my mother's side family;a short visit by the German brother made my own family members to be all under the same roof. But, because everything comes with a price to pay, this time I had to reschedule, rearrange meetings with friends, eventually giving up on some. To those, who still have faith, I will make a date next time.

Trinacria, let's get down to business!

Thursday morning, Elisa arrives from London. She is my guest in this summer 2013, timing her visit with my return home, return that was to a cold and rainy summer, with the risk to hijack any suntanning attempt. Fortunately, this perturbation is temporary, and in fact the week after is very sunny and very warm (in line with the projections for the season), allowing us to start off with a granita breakkie, a must-see stop in Acitrezza , as well as in Taormina.

Next, we go south, so south that more south is not possible. We are heading to the southernmost place in Italy, that is Portopalo di Capo Passero, with its Island of two currents separating Mediterranean sea from Ionian Sea. Here, we're even more south than Tunis, and indeed the coast features a few dunes. Had I spotted a camel, I wouldn't have been at all surprised…

This part of Sicily was yet unknown to me, unexplored, and after seeing the seaside I asked myself why it took me so long. But, I may know the answer: I didn't have connections. Now that cousin Daniela and husband Sebastiano have moved and live there stably, the opportunity is perfect to accept their invitation and spend a day or so with some relatives. Hospitality was so special, with the aded value of a cloudless sky, that me and Elisa decide to stay longer and work on that suntan (I certainly can't go back to Tokyo without a tan, it's unthinkable) and on the local food. The area is famous for cherry tomatoes, fish, wine….if we add to that a cousin who loves bar hopping, her husband as a well skilled cook, and a swim off the oldest tuna fishing complex in Sicily, then one well understands how difficult is leaving.

The town per se, where my cousins live, is quite small and mainly lives upon fishing, or wineries. Once there had been this building where they processed the big tunafish fished in the Mediterranean. Now, abandoned and semi-collapsed, this building is yet another demonstration of how little some people can love their own roots…the story goes that the Gattopardo rich clan once owned a vast land, buildings, palaces and the above mentioned fishing facility, but the descendants over the years abandoned one possession after another, not caring at all about the humongous patrimony. Too bad, shame on them! Nearby city of Marzamemi offers what Portopalo can't, that is nightlife, that one made of nights spent outside, strolls through the narrow streets form bar to bar, loud music until morning.

We then continue with a full immersion into art and architecture by visiting a couple of cities symbol of Sicilian baroque. Modica and Ragusa Ibla are two small jewels on top of a mountain, completely submerged in sunlight during the good season, boiling hot because made entirely of stone. Summers are really hot in there. The old city centre develops around the rocky tip, criss-crossed by narrow streets, stairsteps zig-zagging everywhere. Nowadays, especially in Modica, the old center is abandoned, many the houses emptied or destroyed to remains where only plants and old chests of drawers live. Those two cities, among a few others in the south of Sicily have been chosen also to shot a TV series extracted by books by a famous Sicilian writer, seeing a chief of police dealing with murders. Before leaving art and history behind, we made a stop to try wine ice cream (yes, made of wine)…divine taste I would say….

Monday afternoon Elisa goes back, and with her leaves part of the sunshine. The so long warded off rain came soon after, and partially ruined my evil plan of a full-on tanning.

In transit, in Beijing for enough hours to allow myself the luxury to sit down and watch passengers strolling in the terminal…when I am not playing ukulele.

Many Italians in this city. I hear them speaking their Milan or Rome accent, people of means, with expensive clothes that scream Italian. Yes, I just need to give an eye before giving an ear to figure them out. Who knows why they choose Beijing…..its suburbs, seen from the airplane, are quite ugly. Then there's always that sort of grey/yellow-ish/humidity/smog/dust/gas layer that is impenetrable already at 500m distance. Ah, well, preferences.

A first time: an old Chinese is standing in front of me and openly is taking a photo of me! I should have ran after him and have a word with him. Nah, make that two. At first I thought he was focusing on something behind me, so I turn to see what that was about but there's nothing….the dude is really aiming at me, damn! With a satisfied grin on his face!

known facts about the Chinese: they have no manners, they just don't know how, they don't pay attention to people around them (apart from the old pervert, apparently), they are too concentrated in talking on the phone all the time, or chatting with friends traveling, once they are in the airplane they just yell, they call each other from two opposite ends, they make just a mess.

There is an Italian old movie about a guy who flies to Australia to find a wife. There is this scene where, on the airplane, passengers take out breads, cheese, all sorts of home made foods and start eating…Well, same thing happened at the airport in Beijing and on the airplane. They carried bags with wraps, fruits, instant ramen, whatever and then they leave the place trashed. I actually was wondering why I saw machine dispensers for hot water all over the terminal…..Simple! It is to get their instant ramen! I mean, it's lunch time, they eat no matter where they are no matter whether the flight they are going to take is serving meals on board…

Being used to the Japanese I find a lot of common traits between the two people, but the Chinese do everything with total lack of care and with lot more spontaneity….they are just natural!!

It must be said that many, many people don't know how to travel. Very often, or shall I say always, I get annoyed as soon as I step in the airport. It must have happened to you too to meet unexperienced travelers, or just bad-mannered ones. If you belong to one of these two categories, know that you don't have my sympathy. I mean, it takes only a minimum of attention around us, a bit of common sense. If you don't possess even that, you better not travel at all and attend a good manner class…

The licensed ignorant (meaning the one who ignores) can be immediately and easily spotted: the ones who walk to the check-in carrying an oversized, overweighed, over numbered baggage, the ones who haven't yet learned that IDs are asked anywhere in the departure process and it is better to have them handy. Such travelers, in the face of the huge, gigantic notice about the forbidden items on board, are the ones who make noise at the security checks….and it is well known (not to them, it seems) that everything that's, uh, _metal_ beeps under the detectors…so those travelers should remove belts, coins, watch and any, uh, _metal_ accessories! Such travelers, who show off next generation devices and gadgets, don't know yet that laptops (and actually anything containing batteries) are to be scanned separately.

Hardly moving, and cultivating that zen calm state of mind I am aiming to reach in my training sessions, I wait that the usual idiots in front of me are done slowing down the line. It's not over yet, we haven't taken off yet…

At the boarding gates queues are impressive, that makes me think it is not clear to all that 1) seats are numbered and named so no one else can take it, 2) the airplane doesn't leave without you (unless you got lost in the duty free labyrinth or fell asleep in the toilet). Maybe the most unnerving part is right on the airplane, when I observe my fellows not having a minimum of respect for others: they do actually sit at someone else's seat, to then ask at least three other passengers for sitting back to their assigned seat, they take all the time of the world to store their luggage and occupy the isle indefinitely, they stubbornly check their phones in the face of the repeated announcements on safety and in the face of the flight attendants who always ask so politely…it's like all these people were allergic to all this, or as if they feel above any rule, or like they simply don't give a damn and keep behaving badly. Oh, and not to mention when they grab the back of my seat to stand up!!!

And even you, woman! You flight attendant passing by and say "Fish and eggs!", remember that when offering a choice between two options, you should say "Fish OR eggs?" , maybe with a slight intonation that implies a question has been asked, and maybe adding a "would you like.." to sound nicer. OK, it can pass this time. I know Japanese politeness, maybe too much, can't be matched.