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August 14, 2014

My Best Friend

This month is a big month for Steve and me for a few reasons. It marks six years since we first started trying to conceive. Monday is our seven year wedding anniversary. And, today is Steve's 29th birthday. So I thought I would take this opportunity to brag about him a bit.

At a Thrice and Thursday concert a few weeks
before our first date. I remember Traci
dressing me and adding the fake
lip ring, haha.

I first met Steve in May of 2003 when we were both in a scholarship competition at Roberts. I remember coming home and telling my friends that there was one really cute boy in my group who was super funny. I met him again when we were in the same group in orientation, but didn't have very much contact with him for the first couple of months. Still, I remember being impressed with him. I remember a particular time during chapel having a hard time keeping my eyes off of him as he was so clearly worshiping the Lord and not thinking about what was going on around him (clearly that wasn't the case for me at the time).

We started hanging out more and more and went on our first date just after Christmas, I think. This was my first date ever. My wonderful best friend offered to pay him $20 to kiss me on the first date, but he refused saying he had too much respect for me for that.

Niagara falls, December 2005 I think

Anyway, by February 7th, 2004 we declared ourselves "official" at B.T.'s snack shop at Roberts. Since then, it's been a wonderful adventure. And "adventure" truly is the right word. Most of our dating adventures centered around ridiculous car issues. I remember the driver's seat started to rust out of his car and it would bounce up and down and nearly scrape the ground as we drove (they welded it later). And the passenger door in that car didn't have a seal, so I would literally get snowed on. On the way home from a Relient K concert, we dragged the Oldsmobile's muffler throughout downtown Rochester when is started to fall off. When that car died, he had his parents' van. It had the two front seats, no middle seats, and the very back seats. The only door that opened was the front passenger door. I remember he took me and four or five of my girlfriends to a movie and we all had to pile in and out of the same door. Another time a friend of his borrowed it and returned it after someone thew up in the passenger seat and did not clean it up. We went to church together in it the next day, and I had to sit in the very back while he drove.

A Lebanese dinner at our friend Bob's house.

One of my favorite things about Steve is how he pays attention to the people around him. I remember one of my Townies saying to me senior year that she was always so encouraged when she ran into Steve on campus. He would notice when she was wearing a new skirt or when she looked like she was feeling down or stressed out. Not in creepy way, but because he pays attention to people and who they are and what makes them tick.

At The Spot coffee house our junior year of college.

In fact, Steve came home late from work the other day because he was talking to an employee who didn't get the promotion he wanted. It turned out the guy was dealing with depression and thoughts of suicide and Steve stayed late to talk with him about it. He come home feeling like he had really made a difference just by listening.

Engagement photo, around February 2007

I have a husband who is loving and kind...

Quick to laugh and slow to anger...

Patient with my craziness (and right now my ridiculous mood swings)

Who loves my family like his own to the point of moving in with my grandparents at one point and loving them like his own.

He fills me with joy.

We've dealt with some difficult trials in the past seven years. For six of them we struggled to have a baby. This was difficult for each of us in different ways. I made the mistake at some points of thinking that it was really only hard for me, but once in a while I would see just how hard it was for Steve.

A little over two years ago we celebrated the opportunity to welcome a little boy into our family through adoption. Then a week later we celebrated the opportunity to welcome two little boys into our family. And our hearts were broken another week later when all of that crumbled. But Steve was amazing through it all.

I remember when were engaged my mom expressed mild concern that Steve didn't seem very "ambitious." She was afraid he might not be a very hard worker. I laugh when I think of that now and I'm sure she would too. Steve works harder than any person I know, not simply to make money but unto the Lord. I am so proud of all he has accomplished and continues to accomplish.

In February we embarked on a new adventure with an uncertain outcome. It was a risk emotionally and financially, but we took it together trusting in God through the process. And the Lord has blessed us with a healthy pregnancy. I am inexpressibly excited to get to know Steve as even more than husband, provider, and friend, but as a father now also. I can't wait to see him fill that role as I have known from before we started dating that he would be ridiculously good at it.

And now we're at another crossroads in our life facing more uncertainty as to where we will live and how we will do that. I'm stressed. I'm really quite nervous about the possibilities. I'm anxious about the next turn.
But really, I know we'll get through it no matter where we end up. I trust my husband to make the right decisions for our growing family.

Christmas 2013, both of us a little bit older and a little bit fatter.

I am so thankful for Steven and all that we have learned and experienced together. I look forward to many more years filled with laughter, and probably some tears and shouting too. I wouldn't want to do it all with anyone else.