Tuesday, July 29, 2008

If you know me, you know that I work strange hours. I'm up at 2AM each morning, prepare for work a bit before heading out the door at 3:15 in time to get to work at 4am. People I talk to each day usually strike a conversation with, "Gee, you have to go to bed at what, 6 or 7PM right?" My facial expression usually dispels their conclusion but I follow it up with this rebuttal, "Not with kids. Try 9, maybe 9:30." It is their priceless facial expression in response that culminates with their jaw hitting the floor. The look is one of utter shock.

I'm writing about this not for pity or for sympathy. After all, many people in the world work strange shifts; many are more unorthodox than mine. I write this to cast some light--actually a huge beacon--on what is responsible for allowing me to keep this schedule without collapsing.Here are a few hints. Its not coffee, although a good cup of highly caffeinated java is real yummy with an english muffin. Its not the Red Bull or the new "5 Hour Energy" loaded with a blend of chemicals and amino acids that make the periodic table look like a kids book. Its not some exotic herbal extract from the rain forest. (Any food or drink with the word "exotic" is really inviting.)

The best stimulant for staying conscious and fully functional doesn't come from food or drink. It comes from a loving, compassionate wife.

Yeah, yeah, I know. What is this, an episode of Oprah, you say? Sure, it sounds sappy and chessy but I meant what I said.

When you are on a schedule that runs against your circadian rhythm, your body gets pretty pissed at you. The enzymes in your stomach churn uncontrollably throwing your whole digestive system into a tizzy. You eat leftover dinner at 8AM. (Bar B-Que is my favorite). Your eyeballs feel like someone took them out unbenownst to you and dipped them in shards of glass then reinserted them into your head. Not to mention, you get fragmented sleep. Four hours here, a couple of hours there. You never feel rested. You get short-fused and testy. Basically, your body is here and your mind is in the other room. Rarely does your mind and body come together and when it does, look out! Strange things happen. A ll of the jacked up coffee on the planet won't lift your out of this funk. Your there to stay.

My wife knows this. When I get home, she works her day around my afternoon nap. Even if that means watching the kids for another 2 hours AFTER a morning of mayhem. Don't get me wrong. My kids are super-fun. But it is mentally exhausting sometimes when, for no apparent reason, your three year old's calm demeanor suddenly mushrooms up into a full-fledged temper tantrum while the 9 month old needs a diaper change. Its all par for the course. All families go through it. But it takes someone special like my wife to sacrifice her own rest and relaxation and mental sanity so that I can get a few winks. You might say that my wife is a blessing disguised in the form of REM sleep. Without it, I'd be a wreck.

I try not to take any of this for granted. Even after I wake up, my demeanor many times probably wouldn't be compared to a cuddly kitty cat. Its more like a hungry cobra ready to pounce on a rodent. Even still, each day my wife anticipates ALL of our needs. She schedules trips to the store so that I can have time to "wake up". She balances out the activities of the kids around their digestive clocks so that they are fed and ready to go. All of this is done to make the day run smooth even in the midst of the groggy, cranky cobra. Her strength and mental fortitude is second to none and for that, I am grateful beyond words.

Monday, July 21, 2008

This past weekend as I sifted through the Friday box scores comparing player stats from other years, something stood out as I checked career totals and the age of the player. Aside from a few standout players, career offensive records will become rarer and rarer in the next 10 years. Let me explain:

I took a list of career leaders in 3 offensive categories, homeruns, runs and hits. I only listed players who are at least 30 years old and who were relatively high on the all-time list which for current players is around 250th or so. Its a shorter list than you think which will be self-explanatory once you see it. Each row in the list shows the all-time rank, name of the player, age and the number of hits, runs, etc.

For comparitative purposes, I also placed a few players who are in their late 20s and have played long enough (at least 7 years) with strong enough numbers to warrant consideration as all-time record setters if projected out over the next decade. Projected is the key word here and can be dangerous as it does not take into account a down year or injuries.

The bold-faced names are players that probably won't retire in the next 2 to 3 years. This eliminates a significant number of players who, although rank high on the list, won't have enough time given their age to make a run at any records.

Now, taking out the players who have been injury prone over the last few years and who have had a significant decline in performance in recent years (Todd Helton), you now get this. The highlighted players are in their 30s and have at least 1300 runs, 2000 hits, 1500 RBI or 500 homeruns (Pujols and Vlad Guerrero are highlighted due to their young age and consistant homerun production)

Pretty short list overall when your talking about players cracking the top 10 or 15 in each category.

Only Jeter and A-Rod will have a legitimate shot at the TOP 10 in RUNS SCORED.Only Jeter, A-Rod and Vlad Guerrero have a shot at 3000 HITS.Only Manny and A-Rod have a shot at 2000 RBIOnly Vlad Guerrero and Pujols have a shot at 500 Homeruns in the next 7 to 10 years.

Beyond this, we are talking close to 2020 when any other all-time records have a real chance at falling.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

It was on that fateful night on June 4, 1974 when the geniuses in the Cleveland Indians Promotional Department decided that dime beer night with no limit was a good idea. A guy I work with was there as a kid but left before the riot ensued. After players were hit with chairs, batteries and anything else that wasn't bolted down, the umpires finally called the game.