As the cyclist involved… I figure I should give my 2 cents..I was fine with being pulled over. I could have gotten a ticket and would have been OK with it; however, the SUV gaining on me from behind should have also been given a ticket. Going 42 (and by the way… why does everyone assume I was going downhill) on Admiral just keeps you with the flow of traffic. This morning, I was going about 30 mph and had a car zoom past on the right hand side and cut over right in front of me just before the merge to Spokane. Like it or not, it’s safer for a bike to break the speed limit and keep up with traffic (if possible) than to try to obey the law..The officer was nice about the whole situation (and seemed to get a kick out of pulling over a bike). He said he had been looking for a bike to pull over for a while (apparently, I was the first going fast enough). He told me he was careful to write a neat contact report so that I could frame it. If only I had known I was going to be clocked…

And then went on to boast that he had even exceeded woo-hoo-hoo-hoo speed (or WHHHS-1) this one time at band camp:

The fastest I’ve ever gone on a bike? 58mph down a 25% grade in England, on a mountain bike and towing a fully-loaded trailer.

That's nothing. I once hit 76mph on my Big Dummy while descending a vertical rock face in Canada and "portaging" 130 kilos of expired "back bacon." If you don't believe me just ask my girlfriend at the time, Angelina Jolie. Also, I was wearing bib shorts over my t-shirt and had a parrot on my shoulder, just like this guy:

Though that goes without saying.

Something else that goes without saying is that the time-traveling t-shirt-wearing retro-Fred from the planet Tridork Bret is the very embodiment of cycling, and a reader in Australia informs me that not only did he and his countrymen get to thrill to a Cadel Evans Tour de France win, but they also got to enjoy Bret's be-soul-patched visage as they did so:

They say that, if you listened carefully, you could hear Evans's "Woo-hoo-hoo-hoos!" as he hit WHHHS-1 on the penultimate stage.

And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll go "Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!," and if you're wrong you'll see a recumbent wedding.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and--if at all possible--ride with a parrot.

108 comments:

Similarity of the arcades to the indoor arenas in which one learned to ride a bicycle. In these halls the figure of the woman assumed its most seductive aspect: as cyclist. That is how she appears on contemporary posters. Cheret the painter of this feminine pulchritude. The costume of the cyclist, as an early and unconscious prefiguration of sportswear, corresponds to the dream prototypes that a little before or a little later, are at work in the factory or the automobile. Just as the first factory buildings cling to the traditional form of the residential dwelling, and just as the first automobile chassis imitate carriages, so in the clothing of the cyclist the sporting expression still wrestles with the inherited pattern of elegance, and the fruit of this struggle is the grim sadistic touch which made this ideal image of elegance so incomparably provocative to the male world in those days.

Who still knows, nowadays, where it was that in the last decade of the previous century women would offer to men their most seductive aspect, the most intimate promise of their figure? In the asphalted indoor arenas where people learned to ride bicycles. The woman as cyclist competes with the cabaret singer for the place of honor on posters, and gives to fashion its most daring line.

Unless of course the scenery is supposed to be metaphorical or something - that the tiny 6" display on the bars magically transports you to a virtual reality TdF stage where you can live out all your Fred fantasies.

How many gigawatts do I need to hit WHHHHS-1? And does that iBike Dash thing measure gigawatts? And what's the aerodynamic drag of a cockpit that has a light, a bell, a mirror, an iBike Dash and a dead squirrel?

Regaurding the Special Frame Material Smugness-Themed Bonus Question is Steel more smug than Bamboo - the answer to that question is based on smugness data from yesterday. Have you checked the NYSE (New York Smugness Exchange) to see where it is valued today?

Knocked off my bike in to a taxi by a girl on a BMX in a London Critical Mass ride, just trying to ride home. They all started on the poor driver while I got up. With friends like these who needs enemies, c*$%s the lot of them.

You haven't mentioned the Pistadex in a while, but you should know that it is "strong" in Denver: $750 - http://denver.craigslist.org/bik/2447467751.html and $1300 - http://denver.craigslist.org/bik/2484839309.html

Wildcat Rock Machine: You might want to lock your bedroom door. Señor Nonsequitorres looks more than non-plussed about his do, and Lob knows what a pissed off kitty can do to you in the middle of the night.

The Bamboocycle UH-02 is an urban cycle created with a sustainable and responsible design vision. UH-02 is simple, light (8.8kg) and stylish. It is designed for your daily commute to work, an adventure through the city or leisure riding on the weekends. It is designed to look and feel fresh in the urban visual culture and it comes in many different colors and styles to match your personality.

And it's not made by a company that has been reported to pollute the planet with poison like Calfee!

Craig Calfee makes bikes out of poison people. POISON!

Crabon fibre is killing the planet.

So he tries to cover his butt by making outrageously expensive bamboo bicycles that I hear, from reliable sources, should never touch even a drop of rain. A drop. Trust me on this.

For only $1,295, we can ship you a bike that's way better than that Calfee crap. Did I mention the rain thing?

Buy 7 of our bikes, and you'd still spend less than you'd spend for one of his personally-guilt-easing crap-cycles... which by the way I heard are made with child labor in China.

42mph on a flat, without drafting? er, yeah, how about *BS* unless you're a pro.

btw, the speed limit doesn't apply to non-motorized vehicles in the United Isles of the British Kingdom. Also, if a copper ever tries to ticket you for the non-offence of speeding you can mock him openly, as he is only armed with a truncheon and sarcasm (although he may possibly have a taser...)

Come to England, I was once pulled over at 45mph in a 30 limit, however when the officer contacted the station, he found that I could only be booked under the 1812 horse & carriage act of 'riding furiously'. Needless to say, I was let on my way. Good old quirky English laws!

...as you'll notice, several people will always be better at this than you...pretty much every time...

...nonetheless, open another tab, go to 'bike snob nyc' again & then down to 'post a comment'...

...import or write out whatever drivel you'd care to have associated with your name & then simply highlight it & hit 'copy' (under 'edit' in the titlebox)...

...now, with your comment ready to be 'pasted', be it original or simply copied as tgs's was, go back to your original bsnyc/wildcat rock machine column & wait anxiously, whilst constantly reloading, until the the latest column appears & then try not to blow it as you highlight the new title & immediately scroll down, once more hitting 'post a comment', clicking on the comment box & then hitting 'paste' & quickly follow it with "publish your comment"...

...you will undoubtedly have not even make the podium but remember, you're going up against trained professionals /slash/ computer geeks who happen to ride bikes & whose bosses will allow them to get away with this stuff whilst at work...

...i myself have done it along with other regulars, thus supposedly appearing cool in the eyes of other bsnyc readers...or not...

...g'head, waste even more time on this stuff...like i said, it's simple & you too could be a winner, ya ???...

Ah yes, I remember doing about 80 kph descending Mont Ventoux. This was followed by gradual deceleration whilst moving away airborne from my then stationary bicycle, followed by a longish spell of doing 0 kph (although some of my previously internal fluids were slightly faster) and, finally, about 50 kph en route to the hospital. I rarely progress much faster than 35 kph these days. Something with donkeys and stones.

i'm not bragging but if 47mph or whatever is fast i hit 60mph going down the Pali highway towards kailua if i didn;t brake i would have gone 80mph and died but the traffic is crazy here yes if you know where i'm writing about people do ride their bikes down and up the Pali highway But it is for Everyone.

...if you pathetic little scumbags had any real balls, the ones most surprised would be you...

...you can personally call me whatever comes to your sad, pathetic, tiny brains but maybe somebody should get in touch with your local 'better business bureau' & let 'em know how you belittle, denigrate & lie about a competitors company now that you've jumped on his bandwagon...

...tijuana - ya, like you'd operate where you'd have to be concerned about things like 'business ethics'...

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!