The Mill remembers when times were simple – a time when buying tickets for major sporting events didn't begin with an alarm call at 5.45am and end with a fist through a computer screen several hours later. In those heady days the transfer game was a lot easier too. Deals were done and dusted in the dead of night with personal terms negotiated in travel taverns attached to motorway service stations, possibly after the player had been smuggled into building in the boot of his agent's car. The first the rest of us heard of it was when Ceefax finally landed on page 302 delivering short, sharp burst of excitement through the spine.

There are occasionally days when we're reminded of those wonderful times. Days like today when we awake to the shocking news that – and you might want to sit down for this – Barcelona have made a £27m bid for the Arsenal skipper Cesc Fábregas. Who saw that coming? The verbal offer – barked down the phone by the Barça president, Sandro Rossell, to the Arsenal chief executive, Ivan Gazidis – was immediately rejected but Arsenal's "resolve could be tested" by an improved £35m offer. Their resolve in this case being their ability to go on listening to this any longer.

In better news for Arsenal fans, the club are in discussions with Velez Sarsfield over their midfielder Ricardo Alvarez. Arsenal would have to stump up £11m for the 23-year-old, who is also wanted by Internazionale, Malaga, Sevilla, Roma and Schalke. Arsène Wenger is also keen on Blackburn defender/stick-the-big-lad-up-front-in-the-dying-minutes Chris Samba who is desperate to get away from Ewood Park for some reason.

Tottenham are considering selling Brazilian midfielder Sandro to Villarreal for £12m while Wilson Palacios could be on his way to Paris Saint-Germain, while would leave a gaping hole in Tottenham's midfield. It's a hole which Harry Redknapp sees as being Lassana Diarra shaped but the French international is set to frustrate Spurs, along with other interested parties including Manchester United, by staying at Real Madrid for at least another year sparing the fans of those clubs the frustration of watching Diarra play one good game in 10 before being dropped and looking all sullen and disinterested on the bench.

Paris Saint-Germain are also 'preparing' a bid for Manchester United's Dimitar Berbatov. The preparation in this case involves digging out some Miles Davis records, dimming the lights a little and ensconcing their training ground in velvet so that everything is just the way Berbatov likes it should he decide to move.

Chicken sales are booming which is great news for Blackburn's owners, Venky's, and their manager, Steve Kean, who is going to put £12m of cash into a family-size bucket and deliver it to Bundesliga club Freiberg in exchange for their 26-year-old Senegal striker Papiss Cissé. A smaller bargain bucket, containing "a six-figure fee that will rise if he makes it in the Premier League", is on its way to Paraguayan outfit Olimpia in return for their midfielder Rodrigo Baez.

Manchester City have been told that Udinese's tough-guy winger Alexis Sánchez will cost them £44m which seems to be about 50% more than anyone else has been quoted but that's what you get for being flash with your cash.

Raul Meireles's reward for been named Player of the Year by Liverpool fans could be a one-way trip to Turin. Juventus have gone all goo-eyed over the midfielder and have offered Brazil midfielder Felipe Melo in part-exchange. Kenny Dalglish has weighed up Melo against his criteria for new signings and decided the Brazilian is neither a) Stewart Downing, b) Charlie Adam, c) British or d) overpriced and has asked for £13.5m in cash for Meireles instead. Juventus are deciding whether or not to smash open the piggy bank.

If Porto thought they had seen the last of Roman Abramovich then they are sorely mistaken. Any day now the Chelsea owner is going to march up and bang on their door just like the Romans in The Life of Brian and proclaim 'there's one place we forgot to check' before storming in and emerging with Radamel Falcao. Porto's disappointment will be softened somewhat by the sack containing £26.5m in gold coins Abramovich will have left in the corner.

Marseille could make a move for Manchester City's striker Emmanuel Adebayor. First they need to offload Lucho González to Roma and that sounds rather complicated and it's Friday so they'll probably come back to it next week when they're fresh. Marseille also want one-time Liverpool reserve Alou Diarra and may not stop there. Didier Drogba could be in line for a return to Stade Vélodrome. "The question is can OM afford the salary of a Drogba for four years," said the Marseille president, Vincent Labrune. "I would say yes, but not 11 Drogbas," which is just as well because as far as we know he is only one man.

In other news, Roma want Barcelona mascot Bojan Krkic. Neil Warnock envisages Reading's Jobi McAnuff skipping down the wing at Loftus Road next season. Tranmere Rovers wonderkid Dale Jennings has a choice between West Ham and Bayern Munich, which sounds like a difficult choice and, finally, Scott Carson could be looking ruefully at the ground wondering how on earth that shot crept by him at Turkish side Bursaspor next season. Some things never change.