Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternatives.Maurice ChevalierOn 77th birthday.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Great news for all of us that hate drinking our 8 glasses of water a day!

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poop.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember: Water = Poop, Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of pit, I mean poop.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sometime after Sidney died, his widow, Tillie, was finally able to speak about what a thoughtful and wonderful man her late husband had been.

"Sidney thought of everything," she told them. "Just before he died, Sidney called me to his bedside. He handed me three envelopes. 'Tillie,' he told me, 'I have put all my last wishes in these three envelopes. After I am dead, please open them and do exactly as I have instructed. Then, I can rest in peace'."

"What was in the envelopes?" her friends asked.

"The first envelope contained $5,000 with a note, 'Please use this money to buy a nice casket.' So I bought a beautiful mahogany casket with such a comfortable lining that I know Sidney is resting very comfortably."

"The second envelope contained $10,000 with a note, 'Please use this for a nice funeral 'I arranged Sidney a very dignified funeral and bought all his favorite foods for everyone attending."

"And the third envelope?" asked her friends. "The third envelope contained $25,000 with a note, 'Please use this to buy a nice stone.'"

Holding her hand in the air, Tillie said... "So, do you like my stone?" showing off her 10 carat diamond ring.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A lady is having a bad day at the tables in Vegas. Down to her last $100, completely exasperated, she cries, "What rotten luck! What in the world should I do now?"

A gent next to her, trying to calm her down a bit, calmly suggests, "I don't know... Why don't you play your age?"

He walks away. Moments later, his he is intrigued to hear a great commotion at the roulette table. Maybe, she won!

Rushing back to the table and pushing his way through the crowd, he is stunned to see the lady lying limp on the floor, with the table operator kneeling over her.

He asks, "What happened? Is she all right?"

The operator replies, "I don't know, buddy.... She put all her money on 29. When 36 came up she fainted!"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door."Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya"."Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?""That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda."There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery...""Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me.""I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry.Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?""It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned.""Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?""Well, Brenda... no. In fact, he got out three times to take a bathroom break."~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two Scottish nuns had just arrived to the US by boat when one said to the other, "I heard that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs.""Odd," her companion replied, "but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do." Nodding emphatically, the mother superior pointed to a hot dog vendor and they both walked towards it. "Two dogs, please," said one.

The vendor was only too pleased to oblige and he wrapped both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurried over to a bench and began to unwrap their 'dogs'. The mother superior was first to open hers, then, stared at it for a moment, leaned over to the other nun and whispered cautiously, "What part did you get?"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three women were in the waiting room of a gynecologist, and each of them was knitting a sweater for their baby-to-be. The first one stopped and took a pill.

"What was that?" The others asked her.

"Oh, it was Vitamin C - I want my baby to be healthy."

A few minutes later, another woman took a pill.

"What was that?" the others asked.

"Oh, it was iron - I want my baby to be big and strong."

They continued knitting. Finally the third woman took a pill.

"What was that?" the others asked her.

"It was Thalidomide," she said, "I just can't get the arms right on this sweater!"~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Good morning everybeautifulboomie.

Welcome to the weekend!

We're dancing. We're dancing.

Oh Oh Oh....leg cramps...

Easy on the dancing there Joe Travolta.

I need a hot tub.

It'll go perfect with this hot weather.

Have a hot happy day everybody.

Gotta iron the wrinkles outta my pom poms now.

joe

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There are no strangers here; Only friends you haven’t yet met.

Good Morning Joe, Ana, SpaceQ and Haroula. Joe drink lots of watr you maybe getting dehydrated which can cause leg cramps. Ana sounds like a fun day ahead for you. Haroula enjoy your day. Coffee is ready Cailyn. Chilly, damp and rainy here. We had almost 4 inches of rain yesterday. Wishing everyone a great day!

Hubby woke up early but let me sleep. When I finally got up, we took off for the park. My silly Ipod was being cantankerous but I finally convinced it that it should play my book. We had a hot hot walk, and the dogs were happy to collapse onto the tile and concrete floors.

A shower and smoothie later and I'm a new woman. Son and kids are up and I've been up and down the stairs a dozen times. 10,000 steps will be a piece of cake tonight.

As soon as I post, I'm going to my bedroom to weed through little boy clothes. Found em all, washed em all, and now I need to sort to see what we need to buy. Hopefully, nothing.

Aww Joe, he just wants in to be with the pack he has decided is his. Are you guys feeding him? Labs can be goofy, but they can learn not to be rambunctious in the house if you have the time to train em. They are strong dogs and usually very direct, so I do understand your worry about your mom. You should train Baby to sniff out points.

Ana, have fun with your sister

Off to work on clothes

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"Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole." -Roger Caras

It was a perfect morning for head hunting as it was not too hot, nor was it humid. The creek is still a bit too high, and the water is still a bit too murky. It was hard to look in the creek per say, but I had lots of sand bar area that has had the flood water flowing over it.