If, on the eve of Halloween, your mind has turned to Amethyst Realm, the woman who dated more than 15 ghosts, let us get you up to speed. She has settled down. With another spook.
The 30-year-old "spiritual guidance counsellor" from Bristol plans to have a baby with her spectral fiancé, Cornwall Live reported, though how that …

Re: Dear God,

You're thinking about it bassakwards. You don't pick one now, you wait.

Consider that thanks to the many gods and goddesses that Man has invented^Wdiscovered^Wcome in contact with^W^W^W^Wwhatever, the chances of you actually worshiping THE Gawd/ess that created this dampish rock we live on are slim-to-nil ... I suspect that the god of the OT would be really, really pissed if you are worshiping the God of the NT, if they are, in fact, different $ENTITIES ... and if you do chose one or both of those two, what Kali might have to say when you slip your mortal coil doesn't bear thinking about. Probably better to say "I dunno" now, in life, and beg forgiveness when/if you get to the other side, no?

Re: Dear God,

...or Purgatory (if that's still a thing)

Yes it is a thing, and very real for that matter. I used to live there. It is otherwise known as Belgium*.

* Of course, Belgium isn't that bad at all. In fact, it can be a rather nice and pleasant place. That it turned out to be my personal purgatory has mainly to do with the fact that it is the origin of ex-Ms Evil Auditor.

Re: Dear God,

Moderators, can we get this comment thread expunged or at least censored, please? I’m no prude, but these frequent, blatant and shameless uses of the word B*lg*um are beyond the pale. There might be small children or elderly dowager aunts reading this, for fuck’s sake.

Re: Dear God,

"You can report them"

You can also report demons and the like to an exorcist - if you believe in that, that's your bug hunted and pest control... still, I guess it would disapprove hooking up a ghost, especially since "succubi" and "incubi" are demons looking for sex... so, it looks it's an old story. Just, this woman a few century ago would have been burn as a witch. Just those poor women didn't make the money of actual ones...

Or maybe GodHub had a latency problem between the Heaven main system and the Purgatory backup because a BOFH let a poltergeist in the system.... that's why you should never offshore administration & maintenance to the underworld...

Re: Dear God, I am writing to complain....

As I understand Catholic doctrine, there are no such things as ghosts. Once you're dead you are in Heaven, Hell or Purgatory (if that's still a thing) and not around to go woo-woo on Earth.

Still been known to have done exorcisms though....

Therefore, if you come into contact with something which represents itself as a spirit of the dead, it's actually a demon sent to tempt you, so you make the sign of the cross and it evaporates.

Now I think you're getting confused with the more puritan variations of protestantism (apart from the crossing yourself thing - I think they advise waving a bible at it).

Not that I believe a word of it but at least it's a consistent belief system, so this is not a bug report you can file with the Catholic God.

Consistent? I think you've had too much pumpkin punch...whole thing devised by a committee in Nicea (we all know how things put together by committee end up) then left to stew in political expediency and corruption for a thousand or so years.

Abusive nuns and priests, however, different kettle of theological fish. You can report them.

That's only been effective in the last thirty or so years. Think what it was like centuries ago when the Church was a gateway for the really ambitious and power hungry.

Re: Dear God,

As I understand Catholic doctrine, there are no such things as ghosts.

In the original Christian theology[1] there are no ghosts either. Largely (or entirely) because the idea of an immortal soul was something that the later Church added on from pagan theology (along with a literal devil, the trinity and quite a few other things..)

[1] As in the 1st Century, before people started changing the theology for fun and profit..

Re: Dear God,

the default alignment is Belgium is chaotic neutral.

Unless you are on a motorbike. In which case, it turns into chaotic evil.

Unlike their neighbours on either side (Germany and France) which are both quite careful and respectful of bikes - particularly foreign ones. Switzerland however, is very definately lawful evil towards foreign bikes - particularly ones with UK plates.

Re: Part of me is amused . . .

Yep.

And, on This Morning next Monday, we'll be talking to an Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte, who will be telling us of his plans to invade Russia. On Tuesday we'll be interviewing Mr Elwood P Dowd and his six-foot tall pet rabbit, Harvey. Then on Wednesday we will be speaking to the widow of an African dictator who has $62 million (SIXTY TWO MILLION US DOLARS) that she is trying to find a safe home for, and on Thursday our guest explains how he can cure cancer over the Internet on receipt of £1000.

I guess it makes joining the Mile High Club a bit easier, if one of the participants can't be seen, and takes up less room in the cramped aircraft loo. You know what they say, the spirit is willing, and the flesh is week at the knees.

(Serious bit)

At what point does it become your duty to refer the mental health services to a person like this?

Only at the point where other peoples well being is threatened. I refer you to a wiser mind than mine :

"The only purpose for which power can be rightfully exercised over any member of a civilized community, against his will, is to prevent harm to others. His own good, either physical or moral, is not sufficient warrant..."

John Stuart Mill

- now I appreciate that's not how it is in the UK, and we have this nobly corrosive idea that we should somehow save people "from themselves". But to my mind that requires that everybody thinks the same as everybody else. Which is a dangerous path to tread.

Re: (Serious bit)

- now I appreciate that's not how it is in the UK, and we have this nobly corrosive idea that we should somehow save people "from themselves". But to my mind that requires that everybody thinks the same as everybody else. Which is a dangerous path to tread.

There's a difficult line. But if somebody is suffering from a temporary psychosis due to drugs or an infection, then maybe stopping them stabbing themselves or jumping off a building while under a delusion is not quite the state oppression you're suggesting.

Re: (Serious bit)

now I appreciate that's not how it is in the UK

I really don't think it's that way in most places. I can name at least a dozen laws here that only protect people from themselves. Drug laws, seat belt and helmet laws, curfew laws (usually anyway - I could see them in places that have had problems with juvenile delinquents), the inability of grocery stores to get liquor licenses and the ban on alcohol sales on Sunday (those two are local to this hyper-religious area and annoying)...The list goes on and on.