Monday, June 9, 2008

Hall of Shame

I love the drama involved with sports. I'm not just talking about the intensity of a Game 7 in the World Series. No, I'm also a huge fan of the soap opera side. Some of the dumbest human beings on the planet are involved in sports, especially in the United States where the average IQ of a good chunk of the athletes ranges between a sleeping sloth and a box of rocks. I could go on and on about the retards that get injured every year while carrying groceries (Clint Barmes) or playing Guitar Hero (Joel Zumaya), but that's a different post for a different time. I'm going to focus on some football stars that have pretty much thrown away their careers with idiotic decisions lately.

Cedric Benson- Life for Cedric the Entertainer has been rough recently. He was drafted in 2001 by the Los Angeles Dodgers, but never made it to the majors and decided that football was a better avenue. After being drafted 4th overall in 2005 by the Chicago Bears, people expected big things out of the swift Longhorn. He's never lived up to the hype, though. After splitting carries with Thomas Jones for 2 years and only received minimal carries. Last year, he became the featured back after Jones was traded to the Jets and you'd assume that being a top draft pick would make him a great breakout candidate. Well, think again. Young Cedric struggled mightily. He rushed for just 687 yards and 4 TD's, well below the league average in yards per carry. Benson was already known as injury prone and in November he sustained a season-ending ankle injury. Now besides under-achieving, you can't really blame him for the other stuff, but this off-season the rebel without a cause was arrested not once, but twice. First for driving a boat while intoxicated and resisting arrest about a month ago. Two days ago, he was arrested again in Austin, Texas for drunk driving after failing a field sobriety test. Bears GM Jerry Colangelo has called the incidents "dissapointing." Well Cedric is about to be enduring some dissapointment of his own because he's in serious jeopardy of being cut. Chicago doesn't really need him because they just drafted Senior Bowl MVP and Tulane RB Matt Forte. Nice going Cedric, you make all of the other incidents involving Bears player look like childs play.

Travis Henry- Mr. T was already an honorary member of the Football Hall of Shame after it was discovered that he's fathered 9 kids with 9 different women. You'd think that slow up his game, but no he keeps on trucking along. Well, he won't be carrying any loads for the Denver Broncos anymore after getting the axe because of what satanic head coach Mike Shanahan called "A lack of commitment on the part of Travis." How pathetic is that. He's the starter of one of the most potent running games in the league (if you can't get 1,000 yards in the Mile High City, then you can't do it anywhere) and he blows it. Speaking of, he tested positive last year for blowing the pipe a little too much. It was a shock he wasn't suspended for the season, but he managed to wiggle his way out of it, thanks to multiple delays on his hearing. This can be attributed to the spin doctors on the Broncos taking the heat away from Henry. How does he thank them? By sitting on his ass and probably smoking more weed this off-season. I don't think I'm the only one who thinks this guy needs to focus on taking care of his 9 children and spend some time (or the rest of his career) away from the league.