It is Poetry and Music…hummmm

The Two Year Old That Lives in My House
The two year old that lives in my house (sounds like the beginning of a Shel Silverstein poem). Let me start again, my two year old son makes me feel like I’m two at times. He yells and I want to yell back. He’s hungry, cranky and tired, and I become hungry, cranky and tired too. Okay perhaps he doesn’t make me feel cranky, perhaps I give myself permission to be a two year old again. Sometime this is fun, I get to sew a nature bag and collect shells on the beach and pretend I’m a mermaid and Asher fills my quahog shell with sea water from the conch shell. But sometimes the two year old in me becomes an angry monster because inevitably I want control, I want to go when I want to go, and I don’t want to change a diaper, I want to sleep in.

But I’m the adult. Heh um. Yes, I am the adult. And when I’m at the end of my rope, somehow I have to find more rope. This idea of “finding more rope” I read in the introduction of an Alfie Kohn book, Unconditional Parenting. His book provides an excellent perspective on parenting and communication to children and adds to my ever rearranging collage of skills. New skills. The only training I have had for this new job is the experience I’ve had as a child, my experience in this life, and the dreams and wishes I want for my children. Weeding through all this juggling of psychoanalysis and garble in my head is tough. When I’m at the end of my rope and yelling, I hear my mother, when I take on a beady stare, I see my father, when I don’t want to be walked all over, I feel my ego, and when I just sit back breathe and listen to what is really going on, I recognize my boys for who they are in the moment. I feel the truth. And yes, I am human.

The Sound of Rythym“Let’s look up at the stars, Asher.” I thought maybe counting the stars while lying in his bed would be relaxing and help him fall asleep faster. But have I really stargazed with Asher? No. I haven’t. Not since he was a tiny baby. So Asher looked up at his ceiling and said, “Jasper has stars on his ceiling.” His friend.
“Would you like stars on your ceiling?” I asked.
“Yes, mmmm, but but but can we use glue to stick them on so they don’t fall down and bonk me in the head?” I smiled. We talked for a long time about glue, stars, and the idea of camping under the stars and then he said.
“I’m tired Momma.” And then he rolled and snuggled his body against mine. I took in a deep breath and exhaled serenity.
“Momma?”
“Yes, Asher?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.” Oh do I love you so, I could eat you up.

The Cacophony
Two parents in the bed and the little one says…. (what I am about to describe, we call it revolving doors) Waaaa. It’s Finn. He’s teething, completely addicted to my hair and warm body in bed, so when he wakes up in his crib and I’m not there… WAAAA… the crying gets louder. Ahh… a little nurse and he’s silent but laying down next to me in bed. Note: A mother does not fall into a deep sleep when their child is laying next her in bed. Especially when the milk is there for the taking and the silky hair is there for the feeling. One down. Then another little one says.. WAAAA… second child is up. Low grade fever… coughing, nasal drip…. WAAAA… pitter patter of little feet.
“I want milk.”
“Okay Asher I’ll get it.”
“NO. I want Momma to do it.”
“Momma is busy right now, Finn is in bed with us.”
Silence. Okay he gets it. Now there are 4 in bed and all is still.
“WAAA, Finn is squishing me, I want to sleep next to Momma.”
“Asher please don’t wake up…”
“WAAAAAAA….” I think this goes on from 1am, 3am, 5am, 7am… until..time for coffee!
This a no sleep sleepwalking day… “forgetta bout it.”

Subscribe

Recent Posts

Archives

Archives

Craft Hope

Interested in a Creative Writing Workshop?

The journey of motherhood embodies a myriad of experiences and emotions. Theses writing workshops will allow mothers of all ages a brief opportunity to use our voices, express our stories, and dedicate an hour and a half each week to our writing. The workshops will involve hands-on interactive writing and creative exercises. Mothers of all ages welcome.

What ARE mothers saying about the creative writing workshop?

"It really sparked my creativity that was dormant for so long and uplifted my mood and outlook. I met some great women and hope to see them again to form new friendships. This was truly a unique class that changed my life week by week."

"This workshop not only re-ignited my passion for writing, but I look forward to continuing my connections with all of the groovy moms!

"I appreciated the structure of weekly meetings and felt supported during the week and inspired to write and reflect on being a mother."