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The Rockstar

So i know that I had previously mentioned that I was kind of seeing someone. Well that has ended. And now that that has ended I can tell you the story of my first date with the Rockstar. I was initially hesitant to tell this story because I was actually sort of into him despite the initial signs that this would not become a great american love story.

We met on plenty of fish- he was really ridiculously good looking. He seemed nice enough and he was local so when he asked me if I wanted to meet him for drinks I agreed. The night we were supposed to go out there was a big snow storm- he wasn’t hearing anything about rescheduling and offered to pick me up since he had four wheel drive. Your girl isn’t about to get in any cars with any strangers summoned from the internet though so I sucked it up and drove myself to the bar during a blizzard. I have four wheel drive so it actually wasn’t that bad and I am being dramatic about driving in a snow storm. The bar we planned to meet at was closed so we met at the Chinese restaurant across the street. I was 10 minutes late- because its just who I am as a person and it was snowing. I got to the restaurant and it was basically just him and i and a couple of maitais things were going really well until he got up and went to the bathroom.

When he came back from the bathroom he was like a completely different person. He sits down at the bar and asks me if I want to go to his place or mine. I was like “together? bro this is a damn blizzard if either of us are going anywhere were going to our own homes alone” He continued aggressively trying to take me home and trying to make out with me in the middle of a chinese restaurant (romantic right). But the best part of the entire night was when he started talking about how great I was, and how any guy would be so lucky to have me. I was kinda uncomfortable with all that so I told him “maybe if you play your cards right it will be you” to which he replied “I’m a rock star…. I don’t play my cards right”.

I DIED. I didn’t know what to say. I was just like oh ok well I think I am probably just gonna go home then. The next day he still continued to text me as if he did not tell me he was a rock star who doesn’t play his cards right and my boss keeps telling me I am way to hard on the men I date so when he asked me out again I figured I would give him another shot. When we went out the second time he explained the whole rockstar thing to me. He said that hed gotten there early and when I was late he was nervous so he drank an entire maitai while he was waiting on me. Then when i got there he was more nervous so he drank another maitai so when he got up to go to the bathroom he was just drunk and thats where all the weirdness came from. Which if were being honest is totally understandable, I am a nervous over drinker as well and I once got to drunk and told my best friends husband that I can freestyle. I certainly cannot freestyle but the blackout drunk version of me thought I could and thought everyone should know about it, so realistically I cant fault him for that. Plus it was really funny and even though we aren’t seeing each other anymore it is still really funny.

I was actually kind of sad this ended. We had a lot of fun together and it had been so long since I had someone to just hang out with that I was really enjoying that, and he cooked me dinner which no one had ever done unless you count ramen noodles as cooking dinner. But he had a habit of making a lot of promises he couldn’t keep and he was incredibly flakey and after blowing me off three times over the course of two weeks and not making any attempt at rescheduling I decided to tell him that I was starting to feel very much like I was begging him to hang out with me and that was not something that I was interested in doing. I was nice about it, but I let him know that he was going to need to step up his game if he wanted to keep seeing me. He told me he was feeling rushed, which to me was a little surprising because he talked a lot about having a relationship with me, and made a lot of plans for things he wanted to do together and trips he wanted to take, and all I had really ever said to him about anything was that I wasn’t looking for a hookup and that if he didn’t think he wanted anything serious that I wasn’t the right girl for him. For mostly every thing else I was kind of just following his lead. But suddenly he was feeling rushed and didn’t know what he wanted so we decided we wouldn’t keep seeing each other.

It’s not that I’m impatient, or that I was trying to rush into anything. But if I have learned anything about dating its this- If a man wants you around he will make it a point to include you in his life and his plans, and if something bothers you right at the start of the relationship its never going to not bother you, and it will probably never change either. So as much as I liked him it was probably better to cut my losses before I spent another four years with someone I had to beg to spend time with me. I am beginning to think I have some sort of dating curse. Like it seems like things go really well until I start telling friends and family that I’m seeing someone and then all of a sudden its all over. I mean its fine, because there’s a big part of me that was starting to feel like a trapped squirrel, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t bummed about it ending. I am not entirely convinced I wont hear from him again. Not that it would change anything. There are plenty of other fish in the sea….. or rockstars on pof….. or wherever I was going with that.