“Can you believe this?” the outspoken show business parent told us exclusively of images of Lindsay and Dina living it up in the UK. “Is this a case of the blind leading the blind or what?” Michael said he cannot even fathom how Dina parties with Lindsay, as the Mean Girls star is “losing all her belongings, with no resurrection of her career in sight.” Michael suggested that “maybe instead of checking into hotels and night clubs in London, Mommy Dearest and daughter should have checked into rehab together — but then again, neither of them have alcohol or drug problems!”

The sad thing is, on paper? Michael’s completely right. But then you realize he’s actually just transparently opportunistic, and he’s saying all this less out of a feeling of parental intuition and more so that he can sell quotes to tabloids.