Unfortunately the site that I wrote for, Videotape Swapshop, is no
more. This is sad for me having enjoyed writing reviews for the site, but it
also means that there'll be links to reviews from that site which are now dead.
I do however have all the reviews I ever written for them, god willing, that
can be reposted. The following was supposed to be part of an ongoing series
reviewing every Nicolas Cage film (yet) made; instead of rewriting it, like I
will do for all the other reviews, I'll leave it in its original form and only
add additional notes for any context that might be missing transferring it to
this site. I will not add any notes on whether these films are
"abstract" either, only with some of them possibly being covered
properly for this blog in the future in a new piece.

As for whether I should continue reviewing every Nicolas Cage film ever
made, I may continue it on this blog as an additional feature even if it proved
at points with some of the films watched to be painful. As much as Cage is one
of my favourite actors, the reason why the review series was started, I realise
now that like many actors his filmography is far from perfect.

I find myself stuck with trying
to write about Next. I wonder why it
was ever made in the first place in fact, another in a long list of failed Philip K. Dick adaptations where the
comedic punch line is that, beyond the central premise, the adaptations are
said to be so far removed from the novels and stories that its laughable to
make comparisons. Blade Runner (1982)
is that immense exception as most have vanished into obscurity, the only faithful
take coming from indie wunderkind Richard
Linklater with the strange, rotoscoped A
Scanner Darkly (2006). Of course within the recent year or so Dick has had a small resurgence when Amazon Prime decided to make an original
programme for its site based on The Man
In The High Castle; whether it could succeed in bringing Philip K. Dick into the mainstream again
is unknown, but it will immediately have more success than Next, a failure if there ever was one in the Nicolas Cage filmography as well.

Playing Frank Cadillac aka. Cris
Johnson, Nicolas Cage is a Las Vegas
magician who can see exactly two minutes into the future, able to use it to win
modest sums of money and dodge punches before they're thrown. When he is
in-avertedly caught doing something suspicious at a casino and manages to flee
from the security in a ludicrous and random car chase, it catches the attention
of FBI Special Agent Callie Ferris (Julianne
Moore) who wants to use his psychic powers to find a terrorist group and
the nuclear bomb they've snuck into US soil. Cadillac is more concerned with a
mysterious woman who, when she is central in his mind, allows him to see
further in time, spending his time in a cafe awaiting the day he finally meets
her, a woman who teaches on an Indian reservation called Liz Cooper (Jessica Biel). Unfortunately with both
the FBI and the terrorists themselves after him Cadillac effectively puts Liz
in danger and will have to rely on his psychic gift to protect her and save the
world.

If there is anything of good in Next it's that it does try to be clever
with Cadillac's ability to see in the future. A lot of wrong footing takes
place with an incident happening only for the film to go back in time and for
it to reveal that it was a precognition, something that will feel like a cheat
for many but for me actually made the film vaguely interesting. This is definitely
the case with the ending, which could feel like an utter cop-out, but was fun.
There's even some moments of inspiration such as Cadillac trying out various
pick up lines to greet Liz only for all of them to fail and having to try
something much different, or when very later on he has to find where the
terrorists are by literally splitting into duplicates to follow each route. In the perfect world this could've easily made
the film great, even as a silly action sci-fi, if it had a good backbone behind
it.

Unfortunately, as the last
paragraph warned of, an inspired idea cannot save a film if the rest is so badly
compromised. Over ninety minutes the rest is a terrible, bland waste where the
first warnings of its failings are when he has to do an opening monologue over
himself doing things to explain the premise1. Despite critical
acclaim for Once Were Warriors (1994) in
his native New Zealand, Tamahori does
sadly hold the mantle of the director of the worse James Bond film so far made, Die
Another Day (2002), although I suspect that was as much compromise from the
producers that lead to the disaster it was. Next is just as bland, barring its clever use of its premise a
complete and utter waste of time. You can imagine a more entertaining Cannon Pictures adaptation from the
eighties which would run with the premise and its comically Euro trash
villains, but made in 2007 the result is un-dynamic and drab.

Probably the most ludicrous
aspect of the film alongside some of the most dreadful CGI effects I've seen in
a while, including a train, is the cast it has. Bieland Cage have some charisma, but Moore really does feel like a sore thumb
amongst the trio, to the point you could've helped the film out if you excised
her scenes and added more drama in her place. In a world where Cage's ability is under suspicion
without context for others to believe her, you wouldn't follow her beliefs to
pursue Cadillac if you were a senior member of the FBI, not only wasting man
power and money but leading to potential embarrass and cheap jokes likes for
those in the US military who thought they could weaponize psychic powers by
killing goats through the power of staring2. That the only way his
power can be of any use is through Liz Cooper being a deus ex machina makes Special
Agent Callie Ferris not only too big in her britches with her orders but
useless.

The film feels too brisk in
plotting to the point that its twist ending is far from being an embarrassment
to end all embarrassments but a relief in its cheesiness. So much in the film
is lacking of vitality that this review is exceptionally short without padding it
like I have [, with this standing]3 up as another of the worse Cage films I've covered4, not
technically incompetent but bad in its average nature and waste of existence.
Like a lot of action and sci-fi films of its ilk, Philip K. Dickadaptations
or not, it's so mediocre one finds difficulty in writing anything about it.

=============

1. One of the more
odder discoveries of the Nicolas Cage
Project as it was originally called was how many of his films rely on him
giving voiceover during introductions to his characters' lives. He has a great
voice, for the screen and for radio, but these voiceovers appeared in a lot of
bland films I covered and proved to be a warning of the staleness of the final
film baring a few exceptions (Ghost
Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (2012)) where the monologue given to him had
more spark to them.

2. Unfortunately, like
for many amateur and professional writers of film reviews, you read some of the
jokes you originally wrote and cringe with embarrassment at how leaden they
are. Expect some really bloated sentences from some of these reviews as much as
some vaguely interesting insights, the former something I had mostly excised in
my reviews over the years but occasionally appearing in clumsy references like
this.

3. The review hadn't
been completely checked over when Videotape
Swapshop sadly ended, so some grammatical errors had to be dealt with
without compromising the original text.

4. Unfortunately
there'll be some terrible films being brought up as I post these old reviews
and maybe cover more of them anew. Cage
is a great actors, as I'll defend in this reviews, better than the films
themselves in many cases, but the post Wicker
Man material is going to exhibit a lot of pain on my part...

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"I could go on for hours with more examples. The list is endless. You probably never gave it a thought, but all great films, without exception, contain an important element of no reason. And you know why? Because life itself is filled with no reason." - Rubber (2010)

About Me

I am 28 years old and hail from England. For the last few years I have been a growing fan of cinema and have decided to take the next step into blogging about it and any other tangents that about the things I'm interested in I get onto.