Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

Hi, Jeff, I'm fine, thanks. I actually never went anywhere; I'm usually here at least a couple times a week. I just don't have much to say. Except I really must say this:

Gas, $1.82. One dollar and eighty-two unfreakingbelievable cents. I'm tempted to go out driving around to I can empty my tank. Just so I can refill the tank and say that I filled up at one dollar and eighty-two unfreakingbelievable cents a gallon!

Oh, and not only are the stores doing Christmas early, I have a neighbor who has had her Christmas tree up and lit for two weeks.

Crash, 4:30 darkness is brought on by the economic crisis. Illinois simply cannot afford the extra sunshine right now, so we turn out the lights early. Well, except for the Christmas lights, of course.

Now, if we powered the lights with gasoline, we'd be all set. Did I mention that gas was only $1.82?

I'm back from lunch. The wind is intense out there, and unlike certain places it tends to swirl here rather than blowing in a straight line, so it always seems right in your face no matter what direction you walk in.

it's snowing here (not enough to stick, but enough to freak you out)...i called my mom (it's her 85th birthday) and she was saying how their weather had changed so that their high was now only in the mid 70s. troopers that they are, they still barbecued for her birthday,

I'm being a curmudgeon for Christmas this year. IF I get an extra tutoring session I might have enough to spring for a small tree. I already have plenty of lights and the entertainment value of a live tree with 2 cats and 1 dog is well worth the money the tree costs.

*coughs up a lung full of wildfire smoke* I think CA forgot to pay the water bill.

Left all the stats in here this time - just in case anyone wonders. To read them from left to right, it's the ranking (from 1-12), the team name, their record (Win-Loss-Tie), their winning percentage, the current streak of Wins or Losses, their waiver priority and number of player moves.

So you see why I usually cut most of that out! Couldn't be buggered today.

That's not a speck on your monitor next to the Communists - that indicates that they have ALREADY secured a playoff spot. Remember, only the top 8 go to the playoffs. TCK wins a close one from El 67-62. Theodore takes a win from the weaksauce Smegheads 61-26 - even though the bye weeks are done! The Weasels move up to the number 2 spot with a strong win over Sly's Guys 62-43. The Tooligans win one back over Kibby 46-37 and Lab squeaks one out over the Beavers 55-49. Your Commish had a comfy lead going into MNF, so his anguish over his lame duck Bills was for naught and he pulls out the high-score of the week over Di's Johnz 72-52. That's WITH leaving Matt Cassel's 31 points on the bench!

Next week's lineups:
Higgy's Heroic Huns look to keep the weaksauce trophy with The Smegheads; El's Champs vie for the top spot again, but are up against the surprising Theodore; Sly's Guys take on the #1 Godless Communists; Tooligans rule again try to stay in the playoff hunt versus the Mad Lab Weasels; Lab's Area 51 Visitors try to get on top of kibby's kruisers; and the Eagerest Beavers try to edge their way by Di's Johnz. Good luck, all!

Allergies acting up. That, on no sleep, on stress...not a fun feeling.

My mother was doing well after the bypass...then the 12th went back in the hospital...pneumonia, and pleural efflusion. Took 1200 cc of fluid from around her left lung Friday...she came home Sunday. (Was in the hospital 45 miles away. Much driving.)

Monday night more trouble swallowing, shortness of breath...went to ER here last night...stayed up all night...I didn't get any sleep from Monday morning til this evening. More fluid. This time started diuretic in IV...with nitro patch and low dose of morphine for breathing. It seems to be working.

By the way, we finally got a DVD player. Jackie wanted to get a couple of her favorite British shows from a friend over there but needed a DVD player that plays all regions. Our friend suggested how to find that and we ended up with a Phillips for $47.95! Good deal.

Of course they don't tell you how to configure it to play region 2 but you can get that information online.

Region 8 is all regions Jeff. I've got mine converted for all regions. Which comes in handy when looking for bargain dvds. Yet I only buy things that are 220 and 110 - just in case I need to bring them back.

My sister is pretty upset that her boss is apparently getting the Homeland Security job. Seems the new Governor will be a Republican (Arizona is one of 4 states without a Lieutenant Governor) and her job will be gone, in all likelihood.

Headed off to see F2 for the weekend. It's been snowing here, gas is now at 25 krowns/liter ($1.23/liter = $4.67/gal) YAY! The Euro's at 1.24 to the US Dollar - I haven't seen it that good for over a year!

Gas is still in the $2.30 to $2.40 range here and some places are even higher.

I want a recount!

In other car-related stuff, from Overheard at the Office:

Office bimbette #1: So, I bought a new car last night and I didn't need a guy to help me pick it out or make the deal or anything.
Office bimbette #2: For reals? What kind did of car did you get?
Office bimbette #1: A blue one.

The sound of clicking heels you hear is El, celebrating her clinching of a playoff spot with her win over Theodore 51-42! Nicely done, El. The powerhouse Communists plowed Sly's Guys with an absolute cannonball of a week 124-51. Stunning result, and well worthy of our high score of the week. Sly has lost 4 in a row now and is fighting to get INTO the basement at this rate!

In other action - The Beavers win the squeaker of the week BY A POINT over Di's Johnz 73-72. I feel your pain, Di! Weaksauce award goes to Lab - who's Area 51 visitors only had single digits going into MNF and end up with a miserable 18-38 loss to Kibby's kruisers. The tooligans keep a tenuous hold on 8th place with a narrow win over the Weasels 59-56. Your faithful Commish once again had a nice lead going into MNF, and the pathetic Green Bay defense couldn't lose him enough points to lose out to Kaf's Smegheads 77-69.

Week 13's matchups are:
Higgy's Heroic Huns gnashing his teeth in frustration at trying to get into the playoffs against El's Champs; The Smegheads fight out the battle of the bottom (of the league, get your minds out of the gutter!) against Di's Johnz; Sly's Guys try to stop the losing streak versus Theodore; Tooligans rule again see how badly the Godless Communists might womp them; Area 51 Visitors battle to stay in the hunt against the Mad Lab Weasels; and the Eagerest Beavers wonder if they've even got a shot at the post-season as they take on kibby's kruisers.

It will be just my daughter and I tomorrow...my mother is still in the hospital...fluid around the right lung. That will be tapped Friday (Huh. Tomorrow is a holiday. Wish I had known...) Then she'll go to a rehab facility for a few weeks to get her strength back up.

So...while she has not gotten her cataract surgery yet...I'm glad it was scheduled so the heart problem could be found and addressed before a heart attack or something...

Susan, I cringe every time I hear one of these doctor stories. Let's hope she's finally recovered and home for good very soon.

We weren't going to bother with a turkey since there was no one else coming but Jackie felt bad about it so we got a turkey breast this morning. (She doesn't eat the dark meat anyway and this avoids the most fattening parts - wings and legs.)

St@rbucks was quite busy this morning when we went out shopping, by the way.

Jackie was watching concerts on PBS all afternoon - Johnny Cash (actually, it was excerpts from a TV show from the 70s, and you should have seen the hair on John Fogerty!), Barry Manilow (NOOOOOOOO!!!), Roy Orbison (the great black & white concert), James Taylor (tribute concert from 2006).

I made a Turkey and gravy and sweet potato souffle and pumpkin pie and stuffing and ice cream. Pepper made mashed potatoes and green beans. I bought a can of cranberry sauce. Then we engorged ourselves.
I felt really ill.
Then I had to get up at 3am to be at work.

I just don't understand what the big deal is about absolutely having to shop on Black Friday. The sales will be going on 'til Christmas, for Pete's sake...

I had to go fix an ATM at the Sawgrass Mills Mall yesterday evening, and I walked in through the Burlington Coat Factory store. There was merchandise just piled knee deep under all the clothing racks left there by people who just couldn't be bothered to hang it back up. It looked like a bomb had gone off... but at least nobody was trampled.

Jeff - I only saw the BCF store, as I knew the ATM I had to work on is located at the store's mall entrance. I dared go no further into the pit of the beast ;)

All in all though, people down here seem pretty relaxed for the most part... the people in the grocery stores the day before and the day of Thanksgiving were all in the holiday spirit and very polite and tolerant of the crowds. I just can't imagine having to tell someone that their relative was trampled to death by an angry shopping mob.

I dread doing any shopping from Thanksgiving til Christmas. I had to go out Wednesday and get some clothing for my mother...we thought that when she'd be discharged from the hospital she'd go to an in-patient rehab facility...so I wanted to get the shopping done BEFORE Friday. Of course, we found out today she wasn't going there. Just home, with in home therapy for a while.

So the clothing was not really needed.

She came home today. Fluid was removed from around her right lung.

How much?

Get a 2 liter bottle of soda. Pour out a quarter of the bottle.

What's left...the liter and a half...is what was removed.

I SURE hope that is over.

And my voice is still kinda bad...and my ears are a little clogged. Ugh.

My father had fluid around the heart last year and was in intense pain. First they thought it was a heart attack but luckily it wasn't and turned out not to be serious - once they got rid of the fluid.

this morning kylie (the mascot) was talking to her dad's machine on the phone, "I think Granddad would like to see his son." she said, proving she has mastered 1) familial relationships and 2) laying down guilt trips.

The turkey weighed in at (in the neutural oven corner) at 9.9 kilos (22 lbs). We went through just about everything but, luckely, I still had turkey sandwiches for the next few days.

I got to see a little of the Am. football games, enough to know that Dallas romped Seattle and Tenn romped Detroit. Also found a way to watch 2 games at the same time last night on my PC! YAY! Now to get that transferred to the TV screen...

I did see something about Susan being ill and I'll heinze to figure it out. GET BETTER SUSAN!

i love the stuffing my dad makes. unfortunately, my aunt did thanksgiving this year: instant mashed potatoes, Stove Top Stuffing, gravy from a can, frozen corn and lima bean mix. I brought the sweet potatoes, so at least those were homemade. The turkey was good though.

I had the flu on Thanksgiving so didn't get to eat that day. This made me very sad. I did get leftover turkey snandwiches (w mustard) a couple of days later, so I'm now happy again. Plus... I filled up my tank... in St Jo.... with gas... that only cost... $1.41 9/10 per gallon. I've been gloating about that since Thursday.

Yes, the top 4 playoff spots have been clinched - Congrats to Kibby and Mad/Mike for their efforts! In a mixed week - some bloodbaths, some stingy contests - we had some exciting ups and downs.

The Weasels - as previously noted - beat out Lab's Visitors in a close one 79-76. Even the outstanding Turkey day performance by Donovan McNabb couldn't save Lab's bacon. Sly's Guys came close to the top scorer spot with their strong win over Bismuth 78-66. Kibby claims the High score trophy with a drubbing of the Beavers 87-35. The Communists stayed well on top of the pile over Trillian 75-47 and the weaksauce matchup of the week had Di's Johnz squeaking one out over the Smegheads 39-36. Kaf goes home with some lovely parting gifts, as she's officially out of the playoff hunt. Your faithful Commish stays in the mix with a win over the weak-sauce El's Champs 47-29. Thanks for helping me out there, El!

Next week's lineups - the last of the "regular" fantasy season - are:
Higgy's Heroic Huns battle it out with Sly's Guys for one of the last 4 playoff spots; The Smegheads call it in against the playoff bound El's Champs; Tooligans rule again vie for a spot, as does Theodore; Area 51 Visitors picks a bad week to stay in the hunt because he's facing the Godless Communists; Eagerest Beavers are a long shot against the Mad Lab Weasels; and kibby's kruisers decide if they'll give Di's Johnz a chance at the post season.

Almost guaranteed is that Sly has a spot in the playoffs. Even if your Commish beats her this week - he'd have to outscore her by 74 points to pass her on the leader board. The other 3 spots will be fought over between Bismuth, Higgy, Lab and Trillian - in that order (by points) - with Di's Johnz and Mr Fish having an OUTSIDE chance at a spot - IF they win and win BIG (or in Mr Fisher's case, BIGBIGBIGBIG!) Otherwise, they'll join Kaf in the "Thanks for Playing" bracket.

Oh my gosh. I really HAVE changed. It took me until JUST now to remember that "turkey sammiches" used to mean something other than eating leftover Thanksgiving dinner.

But I'm afraid that some things never change: I'll never comprehend anything sports related. I understood nothing about Higgy's post except for saving Lab's bacon. (PORK!)

And I'd come round more often, Kibby, if I had anything worth saying. Unless you all want to read my draft of an operating agreement for an LLC, or a memo to a professor about a Workers' Comp Application for Adjustment, I got nothin'.

Nothing, that is, except my oft repeated report on gas prices: they are going back up. The cheapest I could find around here today was $1.79.

*says goodnight gracie and falls into a hammock* (Do we still have hammocks?) (That's hammocks, not ham hocks, because that would be PORK!)

Gas has held steady for a while at about $1.61. I did see it for $1.59, but that's the lowest I've seen it.

When I filled up the car the other night...it was about empty, and I thought, oh I'll just get $20, that will be good. I ended up going ahead and filling it...for $22. After the $40 plus fillups not too long ago that was amazing.

Thanks for the updates everyone! Much better performance this year than last in FF. YAY!
Neo-you don't need to say anything just serve up moataritas of shoot someone out of the skeet shooter or take a slip on the slip-n-slide.