11 Possible Reasons Your Crush Didn't Text You Back Other Than "You're Ugly And Stupid"

Rejection is an inevitable part of being on the dating market. I don't care how beautiful or fabulous you are: You're still not for everyone. But if you take romantic rejections as insults, dating can affect your self-esteem. So, the only way to make it out alive is to not take it personally. This can seem counterintuitive because rejection can feel personal. And sometimes, it is, but often, it's not, and we don't always consider the reasons someone might not text us back after a date or an initial introduction that are unrelated to our own shortcomings.

In an ideal world, you wouldn't care even if it's personal. So what if someone else thinks you're ugly and stupid? They're blind and ridiculous. But we're not all that self-assured, so it can also help to realize there are many other reasons someone may not want to go on a second date or see you again after exchanging numbers at a party.

In case a broken record saying "you're ugly and stupid" (or something less extreme but also negative) runs through your head every time you don't get that text you've been awaiting, here's a handy guide to all the other reasons someone may not have texted you back. It's not exhaustive, but I hope it's enough to help convince you why that radio silence may have nothing to do with you, or even someone else's opinion of you.

4. Something You Said Secretly Put Them Off

Maybe they disagree with your opinion about Obama. Maybe our spiritual beliefs are a dealbreaker. Maybe they just can't date someone who doesn't like curly fries. People sometimes have odd requirements, and they're not always upfront about them.

5. You're Looking For Different Things

Maybe it became clear at some point that you were looking for a friend with benefits while they were looking for a relationship, or vice versa. Again, they may have registered this without acknowledging it out loud because... well, that's awkward. So, their chosen way of communicating that you're not on the same page was to ghost you. It may not be the clearest response, but it's a common one.

6. There's A Family Emergency

7. They're Getting Their Appendix Removed

True story: my friend was in the middle of an OkCupid message thread when her suitor vanished. He got back in touch weeks later, and it turned out he had appendicitis. They've been dating for months now!

8. They Have Issues, With A Capital I

Maybe they're just not ready to be dating anyone right now. Maybe they're afraid of commitment. Maybe they have such low self esteem they're convinced you're not interested. People have all sorts of issues, y'all.

10. Their Dog Ate Their Phone

11. They Think You're Ugly And Stupid

Note that this possibility is different from "you're ugly and stupid" — because it's just their opinion, and they're not an authority on the matter. You own a mirror, and you're privy to your own thoughts, so you can be the judge of that.

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