Ambrose Bierce Quotes

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher

Ambrose Bierce

Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.

Ambrose Bierce

Good to eat and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.

Ambrose Bierce

QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled when there is not.

Ambrose Bierce

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.

Ambrose Bierce

Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intimate when he is rich and famous

Ambrose Bierce

Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intimate when he is rich and famous.

Ambrose Bierce

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

Ambrose Bierce

WINE and Fermented grape-juice known to the Womens Christian Union as liquor, sometimes as rum. Wine, madam, is Gods next best gift to man.

Ambrose Bierce

PIANO, n. A parlor utensil for subduing the impenitent visitor. It is operated by pressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience.

Ambrose Bierce

A body of water occupying two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.

Ambrose Bierce

Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.

Ambrose Bierce

Love is a temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.

Ambrose Bierce

RECREATION, n. A particular kind of dejection to relieve a general fatigue.

Ambrose Bierce

As records of courts and justice are admissible, it can easily be proved that powerful and malevolent magicians once existed and were a scourge to mankind. The evidence (including confession) upon which certain women were convicted of witchcraft and executed was without a flaw; it is still unimpeachable. The judges' decisions based on it were sound in logic and in law. Nothing in any existing court was ever more thoroughly proved than the charges of witchcraft and sorcery for which so many suffered death. If there were no witches, human testimony and human reason are alike destitute of value.