November 12, 2008

Accepting What Is

I really didn't want to dress up my 18-month-old daughter, Annabelle, as a cow for Halloween. I had other, cuddlier/more photogenic animals in mind for her second Halloween: a dainty ladybug; perhaps a fluffy lamb.

The moment Annabelle saw the costume, though, she puckered up her lips and started to moo.

"You like this one," I said.

"Moooooooo!" she replied, with a discernible twinkle in her eye.

In costume, Annabelle stared at her reflection in the mirror as we got ready for her playgroup party, and she mooed loudly. At the party, she found a mirror under a table and returned to it again and again to admire herself (and to moo). She wore her costume headpiece throughout the entire party. When my friends said hello and greeted her with "You're a cow!" Annabelle happily mooed back at them.

So it was. Annabelle was a cow for Halloween.

It isn't always easy to let go of our preconceived notions of how our projects should turn out, but there is often real wisdom in letting our plans evolve simply into the way they need to be.

This simple principle has abundant applications in life and in writing. The next time you investigate a big decision, try focusing first only on learning all you can about the various options available to you. Then, when decision-making time comes, relax your mind and use your intuition to connect you with "what the situation wants to be." By shifting your focus from the outcome to the decision-making process itself, you allow your intuitive wisdom more space to express itself.

If you find yourself stuck while writing a piece, try stepping back from the work for a day or two. When you return, ask yourself honestly: "Am I interfering with the progress of this character/plot/thesis?" Or, "am I forcing this into something it's not?"

It can seem risky to relax into a new possibility, but often the results are refreshingly on-target and authentic.