Vin Scully, America’s Reliable Treasure

Joe McCarthy hunts down Communists. The polio vaccine is developed. Cars are installed with seat belts. Playboy nudes hit newsstands. Roger Bannister shatters the four-minute-mile barrier. Elvis shakes his pelvis and whatever else on the Ed Sullivan Show. A burger place with golden arches is incorporated. Castro does Cuba.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

The FDA signs off on a birth control pill. A sit-in is staged at a lunch counter in North Carolina. Up goes the Berlin Wall. The Soviets win the first-man-in-space race. Marilyn Monroe is found in the nude, dead. The Beatles invade Shea. Cassius Clay becomes the heavyweight champ. The Packers beat the Chiefs in Super Bowl I. Martin Luther King is assassinated. “Sesame Street” starts on PBS. Hippies rattle the establishment and get muddy at Woodstock.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

“M*A*S*H*” blows away television viewing records. Terrorists sabotage the Munich Olympics. Woodward and Bernstein crack the Watergate scandal and dislodge a president. The Vietnam War ends. Microsoft starts in a garage or somewhere. “Star Wars” hits movie screens. The Ayatollah wreaks havoc. ESPN fires up a satellite in a Connecticut field. You aren’t cool without a Walkman.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

A bunch of kids beat the Soviet Red Army team in the “Miracle on Ice.” John Lennon is gunned down at the Dakota. Ted Turner’s crazy news dream becomes CNN. Someone tries to assassinate the Pope. Someone tries to assassinate President Reagan. Michael Jackson releases “Thriller.” Pete Rose establishes the all-time hits record, then is banned for life in a gambling scandal. The Berlin Wall crumbles. Hip hop is not a game at the playground.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

Al Gore or someone similarly evil invents the Internet. Nelson Mandela walks to freedom. The Soviet Union falls, ending the Cold War. Rodney King pleads for Los Angeles to stop rioting. Lorena Bobbitt executes a man’s worst nightmare. O.J. Simpson is whisked away in a white Bronco. Authorities apprehend the Unabomber. Tiger Woods shames racists at the Masters. President Clinton hooks up with an intern as Viagra is placed on store shelves. Columbine frightens us to the bone. Michael Jordan wins his sixth NBA championship.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

A millennium flips. Newspapers don’t change with the times. Computers become home necessities. Sept. 11, 2001 happens. A dweeb named Mark Zuckerberg plants the seeds of Facebook in a Harvard dorm. Rovers roam Mars. Wikipedia strives for accuracy. Hurricane Katrina devastates New Orleans. You Tube is launched, then Twitter, then the iPhone. Barack Obama becomes the first African-American president in U.S. history.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball.

America aches in a recession. Tiger Woods loses his way in a sex scandal. A tsunami becomes the new world scare. LeBron James makes us mad, then wins two NBA titles. The LGBT community is more readily accepted. The iPad emerges. Two billion people are on the Internet. Miley Cyrus twerks Robin Thicke.

And Vin Scully broadcasts baseball, returning next year at age 86 for his 65th season, a reliable treasure in one friggin’ mess of a world. “Just the thought of walking away from it to retirement — and looking out the window or something? It’s just too good,” he tells the L.A. Times. “As a baseball man, and someone who has always loved the game, the situation and the conditions are perfect.”

The Dodgers are winning, Vinny is happy, and his voice somehow never has sounded more velvety and comforting. This should not be happening, Scully going strong in the booth nearing 90. Thank heavens he is.

Missed part of The Mariotti Show? The Jay Mariotti Podcast for Tuesday, August 19: Meet Johnny Flipoff, the latest incarnation of a bratty quarterback who has no business leading an NFL offense. Between his extended midd