Seagal himself has always laughed off such rumors, but this pull quote from a recent Playboy article of Seagal being praised by California representative Dana Rohrabacher sure sounds like there are some people out there who’d like to groom the old poonani lover for a political run. Rohrabacher compared Seagal to Ronald Reagan, which is basically the Republican equivalent of being passed the conch.

“You know, I used to work for an actor. His name was Ronald Reagan, and he made a lot of difference, but there were people in the press who constantly tried to put him down and disparage him with the idea that, ‘Oh, he’s just an actor.’ Well, acting is a noble profession. Steven has used his prestige to do good things for the cause of peace and to bring cooperation between the United States and Russia, and I think that’s wonderful.” [Playboy, current issue]

The article, incidentally, was about Seagal being flown around to tour Russian arms factories (which is still going on – the latest Getty Image of Seagal shows him at an arms show in Zhukovsky four days ago) in the hopes that he’ll become “the face of the Russian arms industry.” Basically, Russia still has massive military industrial capabilities leftover from the Cold War and Russian arms manufacturers think Steven Seagal has the clout to pressure the US State Department into changing a rule limiting the import of Russian weapons to the US market. Seagal does ads for Russian arms and one company even named a sniper rifle after him (marksmanship being one of the roughly 12 million things Steven Seagal claims to be an expert in).

But back to the quote. Just to recap, a congressman who idolizes Ronald Reagan for being tough on the Russians just reverently compared Reagan to Steven Seagal, an actor who has essentially become Russia’s chief apologist in the US.

I’ve always assumed the Contra game (which came out the same year the scandal broke) was named after that.

Oliver North may have been the fall guy, but he was also an incredible piece of shit. He ran an illegal operation that sidestepped normal military channels, and when he was caught, he dusted off his Marine uniform to wear to the hearings so he could hide behind it.

I’m not sure what he wore when he and Fawn Hall burned all their files. Maybe a sassy denim outfit?

Remember, he’s the guy who praised the arrival of the Taliban in the mid-1990s as a group that would promote stability in the Middle East and reduce the threat of any terrorist attacks against the U.S.

Yup. It’s not just fake, it’s a liberal conspiracy to make government bigger.

“Just so you’ll know, global warming is a total fraud and it’s being designed because what you’ve got is you’ve got liberals who get elected at the local level want state government to do the work and let them make the decisions,” Rohrabacher said. “Then, at the state level, they want the federal government to do it. And at the federal government, they want to create global government to control all of our lives.”

He’s the last Republican presidential candidate to actually be charismatic enough to appeal to the masses without immediately revealing himself to be a deranged lunatic. Comparing him to who the Republican “leadership” has been for the past 20 years is just depressing; I wouldn’t be surprised if an 8 x 10 glossy of Reagan could win straw polls against the current crop of Republicans. And it’s clear you’re just voting for the photo, not like Reagan’s actually coming back from the dead or anything.

You are all jealous of Segal just because he can manipulate time and space, knows who killed Kennedy and has written the greatest screenplay ever, which he could show you all if he wasn’t busy giving Puttin a ballwash. He could do politics in his sleep and so forth and so on, Washington is not something that he can get into right now.