Science Has Determined The Optimal Time To Break Up With Your Boring Partner

If you’ve been spending more and more time alone with your Gossip Girl boxset and a bag full of empty Snickers wrappers, you’re in good company. It looks like January is the most common month for breakups.

According to the Daily Mail,

The latest research has revealed that January is the prime break-up period for relationships, with a fifth of those polled citing it as the most common month to end a relationship. The ‘stress of Christmas’ and ‘wanting a fresh start in the new year’ were revealed as the main causes of relationship breakdowns. … Those who claimed to have broken up with a partner in January were asked by researchers whether or not the time of year influenced the breakdown of their relationship, to which 62 percent said it did.

Makes sense to me! There’s something supremely depressing about this time right after the holiday cheer has passed. When all you’re left with are hangovers and extra pounds and snow and failed resolutions, it’s hard to rekindle those lovey feelings that came so easily in the summer. The DM goes on to add,

It’s no surprise that many struggle to get through this period. With fewer distractions, people may look closer at their relationship with their partner and decide that they’re not happy with what they find. The fact that it’s a new year and a new start may mean that some people go with the ‘out with the old, in with the new’ approach and decide it’s time to move on and find somebody new.

If that’s true, at least it’s easier to meet eligible singles when you can pretty much bank on the fact that everyone around you has recently broken up with someone. We should all contact our local congressmen and see if we can make January the official National Rebound Month.

So put down the trans fats, recent dumpee, and get back on the prowl. Everyone is lonely and miserable. It’s time to pounce.