A Technology Public Service Announcement

This PSA goes out to everyone in the world who has ever complained about the inaccuracy of auto-correct.

TURN OFF AUTO-CORRECT AND LEARN HOW TO SPELL.

I suffer from undiagnosed dyslexia and ADHD (that is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and I can spell “definitely” and “beautiful” without hesitating or second-guessing myself. I am legally blind and possess neither smartphone, nor a particular inclination to own one, and I still am able to differentiate between “you’re” meaning “you are” and “your” meaning the possessive participle of “you.” I have never resorted to “UR” unless I was desperately short on available characters. I have never and WILL never resort to using “UR” in an e-mail or a Facebook post. It is pure laziness.

Honor your language, ye English-speaking peoples, as we possess one of the most difficult languages in the world. It is the ultimate amalgamation of thousands, literally thousands of different dialects and tongues, and possesses more contradictory rules than any other language in the world combined. (You will note that I have used “literally” correctly here: Not as in “I literally shat my pants” meaning “I defecated in my pantaloons to express the severity of my situation.”)