And that’s it. It is my time to leave you now, to enjoy the rest of this series by yourselves. I haven’t read any comments tonight, but I’m sure you’ve all been wonderful and nice. I’m on Twitter as @Stuheritage if you want to follow me, which you don’t. Oh whatever. Bye.

What do the judges think, Tess asks. SPOILER: It’s the same thing that they’ve said the last four times they were asked that in the last 90 minutes. Exactly the same thing. This is like a bad Doctor Who episode about fake tan.

So that’s all the Strictly Come Dancing partnerships revealed for the year. And yet I am still contractually expected to continue liveblogging this for another eight minutes. Hope you like long silences and indifference, kids.

Charles Venn will be partnered with Karen Clifton. Karen just split up with her husband, who is also a dancer on this show. This bloody programme is like an Albee play. I don’t know how you people stand it. 12/10

Seann is being introduced to his partner, who is Katya Jones. Katya had to put up with Ed Balls, remember, so she’s bound to be pleased about not being lumbered with a novelty politician who still does the bloody Gangnam Style dance all the time without anyone asking for it. They have a weird faked enthusiasm for each other, but 8/10 nonetheless.

Finally, here’s Graeme Swann. I hope Graeme doesn’t DUCK rehearsals this year, or else he might face a FOWL. He’d better be SWIFT and not GROUSE on the show, or else he’ll be BUSTARD. Graeme Swann plays cricket and is named after a bird.

Graeme is swapping cricket balls for glitterballs, because of course he bloody is.

Final gaggle of celebrities now. First it’s Seann Walsh, a comedian who either needs the money or just really wants to present intermittent field reports about kooky road signs for The One Show in the relatively near future. Those are the only two reasons for a comedian to do Strictly Come Dancing.

There is also dancing. Singing and dancing. And guitar playing, if you count Nile Rogers. And just sort of standing there, if you count the woman standing next to Nile Rogers. This is time well spent, isn’t it? Also, they’re all standing on a lousy excuse for a plinth. I knew plinths and you, sir, are no plinth.