Thursday, 31 March 2011

Friends, it's me! Well, who else did you think it was gonna be? Hahah! Today, my human is very happy, and it has to do with that boring old trust thing again! Let me tell you all about it.

As most of you now know, Dogface has retired, so the human is having to use a white stick to get around places. She says the propper name for this is a long cane, but then she says that it's white and it's a stick and she likes to call a spade a spade. Now I don't know what a spade has to do with a white stick, or why she's bringing the vet peoples into this, cuz I'm not due to be spaded for ages! But she's a human, and so I just shake my head and get on with thinking about higher things when she has little turns like this.

Because she's now using the stick, she has to learn how to get places all over again, and so some peoples come to the house occasionally, and she picks up the stick and leaves with them. They go and teach her for a long time and then they come back. The human is usually tired after it cuz it's hard brain work for a people to learn a lot at once, and learning with the stick requires an enormous amount of concentration. She covered about two and a half miles in today's session alone, and that's a lot of walking, if ya ask me! But i'm getting ahead of myself.

So, today, one of these peoples came to the house. He was a manpeople, and he seemed to be quite nice, but you know my views on strangers, folks. Steer well clear! I have a thing about manpeoples too. Well, I have a thing about ladypeoples as well, but it takes me longer to like manpeoples than ladypeoples. When he came in, I didn't run away straight away, but I didn't tell him hello either. I might have hid a little on the human's lap, but can we just say that I jumped up there for a cuddle? It'd make me feel a whole lot better if we took that approach.

Then it was time for her to leave for her learning, and me to get in a quick nap. After a long time, they both came back in again, and it was then that the manpeople really came into his own. Do you know what he did? He said hello to me just like my human does when she comes in the door, and he didn't move quickly when he passed me. When they had both sat down, I went to snuggle the human just to say welcome home. I went right to the end of her knee and sat there for a long time just looking at the manpeople as he talked to the human. Any time he caught me looking, he would tell me hello again, but not once did he reach out to try and pick me up. I decided to be brave, and I jumped down from the human and went and sat by his feet. He reached down and he tickled me! Then he started to tell the human and me all about his mancat who is old now. Well, I thought, if he has a cat, and a mancat at that, he's surely got some trustability. With a deep breath, I jumped up on the chair beside him, but he did nothing other than tickle me! This was good, I thought as I breathed a sigh of relief and crept a little closer.

He and the human carried on talking about animals for longer, and they both were laughing about how they treat us like peoples almost too much and spoil us too much. I laughed too, up my furry sleeve of course, cuz I know that this particular human treats me better than a people. She told him all about how sick I got and how close she came to losing me, and he said that his old mancat would go soon, and he thinks he'll be upset enough that he'll have to take a whole year off the work hunt! Then he laughed a little at himself, but seemed reassured when the human told him that she, unlike many other peoples, totally understood this deep attachment and care for your cat. See? I've taught her well! All the while he was talking, I was getting closer and closer, and he was tickling and tickling, and by the time he was finished, I even gave him a head bumpy!

When he left, I didn't run away, even when he stood up, something I don't normally like. I enjoyed my time with him, and even gave him head bumpies when he was going, and asked him with a little miaow not to go. He laughed, gave me a tickle and told me he'd be back at some point, so not to worry. I really like him! And that's made the human very happy. She says it's a good thing that I am beginning not to be afraid of new peoples. She's wanted this for me for some time now, cuz she wants me to know that everybody that comes in will love me. Now I know that's not true, and I told her so. I will continue to pick and choose who I like, but perhaps I won't run away so often now, not if they're all like this nice people!

Have a good Thursday, friends, and keep checking back! I promise you there will be a few more pictures to come whenever I can get them! On Tuesday, there'll be loads. It will be the day I have my last bath before my big show next weekend, and now that that lovely student people has taken lots of pictures, I can talk you through the process, and even show you! Have you ever seen a purple ladycat before? You won't be able to say no to that question after Tuesday! Intrigued? Keep coming back and all will be answered very, very soon!

Wednesday, 30 March 2011

over the last few months, I've been talking about trust in the human. Ittakes a lot to get this from me, and so it should from any cat. Peoples arestupid. We cats are born with the knowledge that we are superior, this onlyreinforced by all of the idiotic things our peoples do on a daily basis. Soto learn to trust one in spite of all of this is rather a big deal if youask me. Add to that the fact that I was definitely not trusting when I cameto this human, and you can see that whenever I show a modicom of deciding togo down that path, it gives the human a great deal of pleasure. In supportof this, note exhibit A.The look of apparent bliss on my face as my human bestows affection uponthe floofy yummy tummy is not, in fact, real. It's simply put there for thebenefit of peoples, as I know it makes them go all mooshy, and when a peopleis mooshy, it leads to better amounts of treats! For the sake of my humanand her dysfunctional eyes, I added loud purring and a few well timedmiaows. As any cat worth their salt will tell you, this is not an indicationthat I am thoroughly enjoying this activity. It's only a way of getting thehuman to capitulate without a fight. And you know what? It worked!The moral of the story? Trust isn't such a bad thing... Not when it getsyou treats!Have a yummy tummy Tuesday, friends, and show off that floof! you neverknow, it might actually gain you something worthwhile!

Sunday, 27 March 2011

Or at least, I will be in a few months. Do you remember me telling you the last time I posted that over this weekend, something cool was going to happen? Well, today that something did.

you remember that I go to shows, don't you? Well, my next one is coming up in about a month, and so the human has started the stupid old "let's bath the cat every two weeks" rubbish again to make sure my coat looks its best on the day. Recently, she was contacted by a Media student who was very interested in the ins and outs of showing cats. She wants to do her end of year project on it, and asked if the human would be willing for her to come up and take some photos and video of how she gets me ready for show. Without even consulting me first, the human said she didn't mind at all. Honestly, the nerve! I didn't shout at her though, cuz let's face it, every cat wants to be the centre of attention, don't they? And that's exactly what I'll be. The student is going to do an exhibition, and guess what? I'm gonna be the cover girl! Well, they didn't confirm that, and she did say to the human that she also wanted to feature another people and their cat, but I just know I'm gonna be the one on the cover!

The cover of what, you say. Well, she's hoping to do a sort of fold out book, rather like a consertina affair. She's been thinking too and says she wants to do an etching for the front of it, and then emboss it so that the human too can appreciate some of her work! Isn't that lovely? We might even be given a copy to keep for our very own!

She came today and took lots of pictures of me in my bath and while I was being dried. At the start I didn't mind, but by the end of it, I was thoroughly fed up with the whole thing, so much so in fact that I hissed at her when she tried to come close! It's not cuz I didn't like her. I'm just practicing being a diva, that's all. But I do now understand what you all are talking about when you say that the flashy box is an annoyance. It really is! I think I could learn to hate it, but for now, I'll allow its flash to flash unchallenged, cuz it means that lotsa peoples are gonna get to look at me!

I just want to address something about Caboodle to follow up. It's been brought to my attention firstly that Caboodle will actively sue anyone who posts a defammatory story about them, and secondly, that the pictures I was sent are up all over the internet with inconsistent dates as to when they were taken. In light of both of these things, I'm not going to take the story any further, and am sorry if I've posted something which wasn't entirely justified. I did it for the good of the cats potentially stuck in those situations, but I think in future I'll just keep my mouth shut. I've been thinking about this for many, many days now, deliberating with myself. After all, it's us little folk who can get things done by raising awareness of issues such as this, so I didn't make the decision not to go ahead lightly. I also didn't decide not to post about anything like this again lightly, for that very same reason, but I think that unless I've been there and seen things myself, I'm going to steer well clear of it. If I can work out how, I'm going to take the Caboodle post down, and I will also pray very hard that if what was said there is true, someone will step in and help out..

To clear up something else that Craft Cat posted, Clouder does not own this blog, no. he just contributes to it with his super duper technical know how! He's a whizz! Nope, it's me, Tia, that owns this blog, and it'd better stay that way!

Well friends, I'm quite worn out after all my photo shoots, so I think I deserve a long, long nap. The human says that the student promised her faithfully that she'd send her pictures, so when we get them, we'll try and put them up! I might do a series of them leading up to my show day. Who knows! Have a smashing Sunday!

Friday, 25 March 2011

Sorry I haven't been around again for the last few days, friends, but I've just been so busy playing with all of the amazing toys I was sent! I have so much news to tell you today!

Ok, most important thing first, toys. Eventually, the human did give me my mat that smelled like catnip to play with, and you know what? It was a refillable catnip mat! There's a little zip in one side that the human can open and pour loads and loads of catnip in there. And it even came with a bag of its own! Is this a Boogie Mat? When Dogface came round (I'll tell you why in a minute) the human picked the mat off the floor so that she couldn't lie on it and get dogface stink all mixed up with the lovely smell of catnip, and she put it on a little table where she forgot all about it. Well yesterday when she was trying to find me, she discovered me on that table on my side with my feets stretched right out. Friends, I was soooooo zoned! I don't normally climb on tables, but the smell of that scrummy catnip was too much even for me not to go look! She still hasn't given me my nanner. She says I gotta wait for that too cuz I'm a spoiled cat at the moment with so many toys that I don't know what to play with next! I disagree. A ladycat can never have too many toys, right? She's put a lot of them away and is now rotating them which is fun cuz I get to discover new toys all over again every day, but not fun cuz I want to play with them all! now! All the time! Forever! Please friends, tell me how I can make her give me them all back? They're mine, and she shouldn't take them away from me!

But there's more news to come! I got another parcel in the post! Another one! And guess what? It had more treats and toys in it just for me! There was another letter, again very thoughtfully typed so that the human could get the talking man in the computer to read it to her. This one said that it was from all of my friends at The Random Felines.
You should go see them! Their people even put in a present for my human! It was chocolate with nutty stuff in (she told me the propper name for them, but whateva, I'm trying to get to the toys as quick as I can!). Anyway, she loved them, and says thank you, thank you, thank you to the Random Felines people for sending her such a yummy gift! She shared them, but she didn't want to!

now onto the important bit, the toys! They were lots of fun! I got a few sparkly things which are soooo much fun to bat around and chase. I did this for a loooooong time when the human gave them to me. I also got a ball with a feather on it. I tell you what, you toy makers in America are soooo clever. First you put feathers on a mousey, and now on a ball! It's sooooo cool to have a bird mousey and a bird ball in my house. I chased it and chased it and chased it, and when I caught it, I chased it some more!

But you know what else was in that package? Treats! More treats! I'm not sure what one type are called, so maybe if the people of the Random Felines could leave a comment, you can all see? But the other type? PARTY MIX! PARTY MIX! Did you hear me? PARTY MIX! I love, love, love, love party mix! Even though I'd had some not so long ago, as soon as I heard the packet, I came running, and I shouted so long and loud that my human had to give me more. Oh Random friends, thank you so, so much! It was such a nice parcel you sent! And the party mix was great!

This whole toy exchange has been so, so much fun. It's given me and the human such a look into what other peoples buy for the most important member of their household. Thank you very much to the cats at Amy's and to the Random Felines for agreeing to take part in this experiment. It's going to be tough to top this when it comes to the 200th post. I'd better start thinking of ways to celebrate!

Some of you asked about my favouritest hut in the universe that came out of Amy's parcel. It's called a Starry Night hut and I think it's made by PetStages. Amy, please correct me if I'm wrong, cuz the human had to do a search on the internet and hope that the product she found was the same as what you sent for me. It sounds the same, so let's hope! It has what they call peek-a-boo mesh all the way around it on the top sides so that my human can play peek at the cat to make sure I'm all right, and I can play peek at her to make sure she's getting my treats. Well, this doesn't work so well for the human cuz she can't peek, but the big opening in the front is her peek-a-boo mesh, cuz her hands come through there a lot to check what i'm doing, and to tickle me. My human put my favourite towel in the play hut, so I sleep in there a lot now. Round the sides is a band of material that has what we first thought were pokey dots on it. This had me a bit worried. Pokey dots didn't sound like pleasant bedfellows. You can't sleep if dots are poking you, can you! But it turns out they're actually really tiny little stars that apparently shine in the dark. This is so neat cuz it means I will always be able to find my favouritest hut, and I can go stargazing without ever having to get my ladycatness cold by going outside! Just to add to the perfection, my human stuck one of my pipe cleaners in the mesh in there, so not only is it a great sleeping place, it's a super thwapping place too! This hut is just perfect, and anyone who doesn't have one yet should kick up a torrential fuss until your people agrees to buy you one for every room in the house! It's not that you want one friends, you need one. Believe me!

Although Dogman's been here, I couldn't get him to take pictures of all my neat stuff. He only came to go to his sister's wedding you see, so he's been busy running around and doing stuff. So has the human, actually. She's been helping organise stuff, as she is very close to the family, so close in fact that she got invited to the family only bit of the wedding reception yesterday! That's also why we have had stupid Dogface in the house with us. Dogman and his mum couldn't look after her for the last couple of days. Well, they could, but time was tight and they were rushing around here, there and everywhere, so the human said she'd have Dogface for them to make things easier on them. I've been watching her closely. In fact, I'm dictating this message to the human from the hall where she is. But it's such a pain having her back in the house. She eats everything she sees. The human has to guard my foods and my toys for me, and it's soooo annoying. she also gets dog stink everywhere when she lies down or wags her massive tail. Dogman caught me hitting her again yesterday, but she'd just wagged me off the arm of the sofa again! It's impossible to keep your balance when a tail hits you in the face with that sort of force! Luckily, my human didn't laugh at me and Dogman didn't see it, so my dignity remained intact once I'd whapped her for her insolence. She goes home today, hopefully, and so does Dogman which is not so good. I'll miss him!

The human came back early from the wedding yesterday to look after us both, but Dogman didn't get back till late, and he smelled all funny. The human says he'd been drinking, but this doesn't make sense. We all drink all the time, and yet we don't smell funny like he did, and we don't get all tired and wobbly like he did. I was actually afraid he was very sick. Often sick things will give off a different smell, and when they're really sick, they might wobble like he does. But the human reassured me that he didn't need to be rushed to a people vet. She says this is what some peoples do to celebrate things like their sister getting married. I'll never understand them. how is getting sick a fitting celebration for a happy event?

He was sposed to be going back to his work hunt this morning which is very far away from here, but when the human went in to wake him up, he was still too sick to go. He's got to go back home today at some point, but for the moment, he's snoring his head off so hard that I can hear him all the way from the living room where I've just come into to see the human. She says she's going to go hold his nose in a minute if he doesn't be quiet. Then she laughed, a lot. Strange human.

Before I forget, Karen left us a comment a little while back asking about the surgery for the human's eyes, and, stupid as she is, the human forgot to answer. I'll do it for her. She still hasn't heard any more on the surgery. Nobody's gotten back to her yet which she's sad about. She says she'll probably give them till the end of the month and then phone them back to see what's going on. As soon as we hear though, we'll keep you posted!

Wow, that was a long post, wasn't it? I think I've said enough for one day. Oh, just to keep you going, I'm going to become a famous cat over this weekend if all goes according to plan, so famous in fact that I'll be used in a presentation to lots of peoples at a university! Want to know more? you'll just have to wait!

Tuesday, 22 March 2011

Friends, all I can say about my day today is wow, wow, wow! Have I said wow yet? Woooooooow!

It all started this morning with a loud banging coming from the front door and my human leaping out of bed as though her butt was on fire. She ran to the door and opened it, and this is where I got bored. It was only the postman with another box for the human. he's boring. He doesn't give me scritches or anything, so I went to amuse myself with something else. The human brought the box into the bedroom and started opening it, and that's where I got very, very, very interested. This was no boring old human box. This was a box for me! Queen Tia! The only person worthy of a parcel! I could smell it, you see, that wonderful aroma that every cat knows so well... Catnip.

The human did manage to get the top open, but could do no more than that, cuz there was so much stuff in there that she needed room to spread it out. With me sticking so close that she was afraid she'd trip on me, we made our way to the living room. I got her to put the box on the floor, and then the fun unpacking started!

Friends, there was so, so much stuff in there, but the first thing was the loveliest. It was a letter from Amy and all of her cats who had sent me this as part of our 100th post toy exchange. The human was able to read it too cuz it was typed, so it meant that after it was scanned, the voice in the computer box could tell her what the words said.

After that there was some boring human stuff that she wouldn't let me play with. The human didn't find this boring at all though! There was tons and tons of sweets or candy (depending what side of the pond you live), more than both her hands could carry! There was also an adorable beany baby bear that I thought about carrying off until she rescued it from me. It's just the right size to be a kitten, you see. But the most beautiful thing of all for the human was a hand made bracelet from Amy herself. It's lots of rings held together with even smaller rings, and the handywork is so fine that the human actually thought the tiny rings were beads at first. I will try and have Dogman take a picture of this so that you can all see how gorgeous it is. It's very, very tactile for the human's fingers to explore though, and she loves it so much that it went on her wrist when she got it, and it hasn't come off yet! It's so comfy to wear too!

now onto the bit I find the most exciting... my toys. It started with exciting stuff and just got better! First out were three long mouseys that tsmelled of catnip. I actually attacked one of these straight away, something I don't normally do with toys. I'm a little timid of them until I know they aren't monsters that will gobble me up, but not so with the mouseys! They just demanded to be bunnykicked! Then there were long, thin, gloriously furry things that my human says are called pipe cleaners. I don't care what they're called, but I mention it only so that you others can make your peoples buy them for you. They are amazing! They're like the things that you swat, but only this time, you can pick them up and run off with them! You can even hide them from the human! Hah hah hah!

There was a dangley thing that fixes to the wall, or the people that read it for my human thinks it does. Then there were two big balls, and lots and lots and lots of little soft ones. There were so, sooooo many of these it was unbelievable! I had a right good time batting some of them around. Then there were even more mouseys, some of them with feathers for tails. how cool is that! A bird mousey!

But believe it or not, there was more to come. There was a catnip filled mat that my human said I had to wait for till I would give it my full attention, and there was my very own catnip banana! I wonder if this means my love affair with Mr Chicken is over? I can't decide, but I know I love that banana! It's yummy! There was even a massive great bag of catnip in there too!

And the treats! Oh my. There were bags and bags and bags of them. We think some were greenies, but aren't sure, and the others were called Party Mix. Hands down, these are my favouritest thing ever, and I'm going to be writing to all pet shops to make them stock them in the UK. My human actually had to hide the bag of these in the end cuz I just wouldn't leave them alone. I never knew such nice food existed. Cats of America, you have it gooooood!

As if that wasn't enough ,there's even more! I think I've covered everything except one thing, but Amy, if I've missed anything out, I'm so sorry. There was just soooo much stuff that it's actually hard to remember it all. The last thing is a new house for me. It's like my cube cuz it pops up, but it's better than my cube cuz it's a house with only one entry and exit. It's wider at the bottom and narrow at the top and it's made of nice, thick material so that it's hard for me to scratch through it. It has mesh all around the top so that I can see out and keep cool whilst being cosy inside. It's called a play hut, and it's my favourite thing in the universe that came from that parcel. once my human put my favourite towel in there, that was it. I wasn't coming out for no man or human. I've been in it all day. The human says she's gonna have to put it on the sofa beside her just to stand half a chance of getting a cuddle out of me today. This will be perfect for my babies too, cuz it can be a snuggly kitten tent. Oh, it's so, so wonderful! We need these in the UK too!

Amy, boy do me and the human wish we could take pictures of all of this stuff so that we could let everyone see the amount of excellent things in that parcel! I don't know how to say thank you enough. I send you huge big strong ladycat head bumpies... But only if you'll come to the door of my house, cuz I ain't coming out!

Oh what a wonderful day I've had! I have toys all over the house, and I do mean all over! Please can it be toysday every day? To the cats from Amy's and to Amy herself, thank you, thank you, thank you! you are amazing, even if one of you doesn't have furr!

Sunday, 20 March 2011

Friends, on this glorious Sunday, I'm afraid I have a confession to make, and sadly, it involves Dogman.

Dogman comes here most weekends. When I first started to get to know him, I really didn't like him all that much. He smelled of Dogface, and he liked Dogface. But the last few times he's been here, Dogface has stayed at his mummypeople's house. Once he has himself a shower and changes his clothes, I noticed that he stopped smelling so much like Dogface. This led me to investigate him a bit more closely.

Every time I got close to him, he'd call me in a special voice and then tickle me when I came a bit nearer. Over the last few weekends, I'll come close to him much more easily, and I'm actually starting to like him tickling me... A lot. This weekend it got so bad that the human half jokingly said that I seemed to like him better than her. Although I came up and cuddled her just to make sure that I kept her snuggle training up, I didn't do much to dispell this notion.

When the human's in bed and she calls me, I'll only jump up from the floor if she offers me a treat, but when Dogman calls me, I come pretty much every time, and walk right across the human to get to him for a cuddle. Same thing goes if he's sitting beside her on the sofa. Since coming to the new house, I only spend part of every night in bed with the human, but when Dogman's here, I get in at night and I don't move a muscle! The human says that she hopes I won't get too fond of him, cuz she kind of likes the notion that a furry might love her the bestest. She thought she had that in Dogface until she met Dogman, then it just went out the window. She fears I'm going the same way, but I'm not telling whether I am or not. Friends, do you think it would be a bad thing to decide to own another people, especially a Dogman? I've got this one pretty well trained now, so I could move on without too much of a guilty conscience, as my work here is almost done.

Thank you for all the lovely things that you said about my picture yesterday. I hope I can get pictures up more often now! I still rely on someone else to take them for me though, so sorry if they're few and far between.

Several of you asked about the human's long hair. It's really long, isn't it? She says she's going to get it trimmed soon cuz it's getting a bit ridiculous, but I say she should leave it. She used this to teach me what a toy was, cuz I wasn't afraid to play with her hair when she made it tickle my tummy. It smelled like her, you see, so I knew it wouldn't hurt me. I still play with it from time to time, but now I'm more interested in the ribbon she keeps in her pocket for me. When I do play with it though, I go mega crazypants! the human jokes and says that at least her hair is good for flossing my teeth! That's cuz when I bite it I hold on, so she has to drag it back out of my mouth again. She'll only let me play when it's time for her to wash her hair... Can't imagine why.

Later this week, I'm going to post those Caboodle pictures. I've been told they are very graphic, so please prepare yourselves for them. I will warn you before I post, but they're coming.

Saturday, 19 March 2011

Oh friends, I really love my human, you know that? We've almost been together a year now, well, we will have been in May, but it hasn't taken me long to work out she's a soft touch, and a good snuggler to boot.

This picture was taken by mr Big at the weekend, and the human says that it's my favourite thing that I do. I'll snuggle my cheek against hers like this if I want to look at something when I'm on her shoulder, or if I want treats, cuz when I do it, it makes her melt into a big pile of goop where all she can say is "awwww!" over and over again! That suits me, as usually, it's followed by anything I want!

Have a happy Saturday, friends, and don't forget to snuggle that people! It pays off in the end.

Thursday, 17 March 2011

Friends, it seems as though my human is now only going to allow me to blog once or twice a week, and I dislike her for it! Her excuse this time is that she had the HG and the HG's manpeople down to stay for a good few days, and just didn't have the time to write for me, but as I've said before, excuses are tiresome. I have a lot to tell you about today, so let's go!

Let me start by dealing with Caboodle. I appreciate all the comments left, and all the posts on other blogs. Please know that even if I don't comment, I am reading. I plan to do more on this story over the next couple of weeks. One of you asked for pictures, and those I now have, but as usual, I'm going to need help to put them up thanks to the human's broken eyes. I'd also like to know what they are before they go on the blog. Would one of you mind helping me do that? I'm also going to post references to links that Whicky left for me that tell the other side of the story. Dana has promised me an interview, so that will go up probably along with the pictures. We'll string this out over a few weeks, as we don't want the blog to only deal with sad things, and this situation is sad for all involved, not just the cats. I'm not losing sight of that, and don't want to add to rumour mongering. That's why both sides of the story go up. Then you can decide for yourselves.

As I said, the HG came down to see us, and so did her manpeople. I'm going to call him Mr Big from now on, cuz he's the biggest manpeople I've ever seen! he's also very, very scary. I had to run real fast away from him whenever he got anywhere near me, which he did with frightening regularity. The human and the HG tell me he was only trying to make friends, but I didn't want to be friends with Mr Big. He's too big and I'm too small and I, well, I'm not going to admit that I was ascared of him. Let's just say he made me uneasy, Ok? A ladycat doesn't lose face by admitting that, does she?

As much as I hate to admit it, I was actually disappointed with the Hg. I mean, she didn't bring me toys or treats or tuna or nothing! She did, however, bring a stupid dogface with her that she called Nikki and Noodle and Poodle and lots of other names that she says are nicknames. It doesn't take much to confuse a Dogface, so I wasn't surprised that she answered to all of them, and even to ones that weren't her name! I know better. My name is Tia. Sometimes the human calls me fatcat. That came from when I started to put on weight when she got me so that I was a propper cat and not skin and bones. She always kisses me when she calls me that, so I don't take offence. She also calls me poodin or puddin depending on what she feels like, and I don't mind that either, but I won't answer to anything else, and I'll only come to Tia. The HG decided that me and Nikki were going to be friends too, but I had other ideas. I don't usually hiss, but when she came close, I spat at her good! My human says my hiss isn't scary at all. She says it sounds almost as though i have a lisp when I do it, but I know it's super threatening, and so does Nikki! Every time I did it she backed away from me, and I won! One time when she was lying on the floor I got in her face for a sniff and really just to show her that I was boss and would greet her on my own terms, but the HG mistook this for me thinking about being friends with her.

The HG is good at cuddling, but she isn't trained as well as the human yet. Whenever I passed the HG, she'd reach out and touch me, but she wouldn't give me a treat! Not even once! She says that if she feeds me, the Dogface will get jealous, but I say stuff the Dogface. Tell it to go away and leave me and my treats alone, and it'll all be Ok! She wouldn't though, whereas the human will give me one for no apparent reason other than that I come to her. She says the treats are good for my teeth and that's why I get them, but as I rarely chew them, that argument is spurious.

I had a practice show bath on Sunday, and this was a real show bath. First I had to be de-greased, and then I had lots of different shampoos applied to me. There was one to make my colour stand out, and another to give my floof some body and volume. The HG helped with putting the shampoo on me and washing it off, and here's where she really did come into her own.

When the human baths me, she just ignores my shouting, and she washes my bum and my tail whether I want it done or not. of course, I don't mind it being done, but one can't give in without a good bit of singing and squirming, otherwise they think they've won, and adopt this ludicrous notion that they might have trained you. The human doesn't put up with it, but the HG, well, most of the time she had to get the human to wash my bum and tail cuz she didn't wanna put me through it cuz I made a lot of noise. She also said she felt sorry for me all the way through, and that she probly wouldn't do this to her cat. Go HG! That's the kind of teaching you need to instill in my human! Sure, it means that I end up super floofy and clean, but seriously, one bath every few years is enough for any self respecting ladycat! And when it comes to hair driers? Well, HG, every people should take your attitude which is to say "Oh no, human, you can't do that to her. I feel so sorry for her!" Then you remove the poor cat from the nasty drying monster and just cuddle them in a towel until they are dry. As much as I hate to admit it though, I do actually need the dryer, as my wet floof makes me very cold cuz there's so much of it and so little of me. If you're gonna wet it, ya need to dry it, sadly. The end result was worth all the pain though. I've never been as floofy in my life!

After my bath, I was really beautiful, or so said the human and the HG. However, dogface Nikki was obviously jealous of all the attention getting a bath gets you, cuz when she went outside, she rolled in... Ah, I'm a ladycat and it's not polite to say the word! Ok, Ok, she rolled in poopoo! She was covered from head to tail in the stuff, and she stinked! Not content with me having the limelight, the stupid hound had to go in the bath herself, but she's not so good about it as I am. She splashed water everywhere, and it took the human and the HG to get her dry. They even hoovered her cuz there was so much dead hair on her and it was all over the house! She's not as lucky as me though. She only got to use baby shampoo and not my posh show stuff, so even though she had a bath, she didn't get the mostest attention. Hah!

I have another gripe. Because of stupid Nikki who likes to eat stuff, I couldn't play with my toys when she was here cuz she'd eat them and chew them all up. I couldn't even have a go with my ball in a track cuz mr Big sat on the beanbag right in my toy corner so that I couldn't get to it without going close to him. I wasn't gonna do that, so I had to be content with ribbon time with the human in the bedroom. Ribbon time is great. It's where you have to chase the ribbon all over the room real fast and jump on it and pin it down with your paws. You gotta be real careful though not to put the claws in too hard or bite too hard, cuz you don't wanna hurt the ribbon or else it'll not come to play again.

Although the HG is nice, her manpeople and her dogface are not, and I was glad to see them go. I'll be gladder to see the HG return with tuna and toys and without dogface Nikki though. I wonder if that's possible?

I got some really exciting news today. You remember I sent out some packages a couple of weeks ago? Well, the first two have arrived! Amy and the House of Cats
got theirs this morning, and Chrystalat the Daily Dose
had hers yesterday. You need to go check out their blogs to see what the furries think. Apparently everything was a big hit with my friends at Chrystal's place, but the excitement is still going at Amy's, as I haven't heard if my pals there liked the things I sent yet. I hope they do! The Random Felines should be getting their stuff in the next few days, as theirs was sent out a bit later.

To top off things today, the human says we have to celebrate something called St Pat Ricks day today. I'm not sure what this is, but some peoples talk about patting when they are touching dogfaces. Rick is a name, so maybe this is the day to celebrate patting peoples or dogs called Rick? I'm not sure I like this idea. I'm not getting within patting distance of a dogface in case it slobbers on me, and I don't know anybody, dog or people, called Rick. The human says that Pat Rick started in Ireland. Well, they do say the Irish are a little crazy, and with evidence like this in the public eye, I'd be a fool to disagree! The human says that the day is associated with green. I can understand this if it refers to the patters turning green with disgust and feeling sick when they pat the dogfaces called Rick. I would too. Now, call me stupid if you will, but I see nothing to be celebrated about patting a Rick, so you'll pardon me if I don't, eh?

Thursday, 10 March 2011

Friends, it's hard to remember the days of the week lately. Before, I knew when it was due to my human going off to the work hunt to pay for my foods and toys, but now that she doesn't go any more, one day is very like the next, and they all blend together. What's a ladycat to do when she can't coordinate her diary? I blame that for the fact that I'm still not thinking about mancats very much. I mean, if I'm to make a date, how will I make sure i don't miss it! The human says she'll help me remember, but can I really put my trust in a creature that doesn't even remember how to use a litterbox propperly, despite my numerous demonstrations? Unwise, if you ask me.

Well, first thin'gs first, an update on the kittens. The two bouncing boys weren't the last to be born. Mummycat had nine babies in total, but unfortunately, three of them had already left for the rainbow bridge, and one little girl is really struggling not to follow them. Keep those paws crossed that she decides she wants to play this side of it for a little longer! Mummycat's milk hasn't come in, so the people that she owns has been delegated the task of hand feeding the babies who aren't getting the little milk that mummycat is able to produce. The people who she owns is a super lady though, so she doesn't mind doing it at all.

In other news, I just think I need to say that I agree with you, Hannah and Lucy, and I told my human so. When her friend came today, I decided to put it to the test, so strolled over to her and gave her a little head bumpy. She gave me scritches, but the human didn't reward me with treats! how dare she not!

Speaking of food, she bought me a new type of stinky goodness. Well, two new types actually. They arrived yesterday. She bought new ones cuz the old ones had too much sugar and were making my teeth bad. But I don't like the new kind. I ate a little of one type yesterday, but when she put more down today, I only licked it once and walked off! Then when she put the second type down, I ate a little of it, but didn't want any more after that. I don't do healthy, please and thank you! Junk food any time for me! She says I'd better learn to like it cuz she bought a lot, but I say I'll like it if I choose to, and if she doesn't like it, well, she better learn to like it! hah, human, bet you don't like it now that the shoe is on the other foot, do you!

I've been having fun in my new place, and training the human at the same time. you remember I told you I was hanging out by the litterbox a lot? Well, my human thinks that if she gives me treats, it'll draw me out of there, so every time I go towards it and don't use the box, she calls me back into the room where she is. If I jump up on the sofa beside her, I get a treat. All I have to do is jump back down again an dpretend to head for my safe spot, and you know what happens? She gives me another treat when she calls me back and I come! Man, this human training is soooo easy!

I also had fun playing with my toys today. I've told you about my play cube before. It's so neat and it has three round entrances that you can dive through. Each one has a dangling toy hanging down from above that you can swat and bite, and it's soooo much fun! It's even good as a little house to take naps in. I climbed in there this morning and was just about to doze off when I noticed that right in front of me, within fairly easy whapping distance, was my ball in a track! This is a cool toy, cuz no matter how many times you whap the ball, you can never lose it cuz it stays in its track. I love it. I leaned forward to give it a whap, and I got it good! But as I did, the cube moved, and something whapped me on the head! I swizzled round in surprise, and what do you know? it was a ball! But how did that get there? it was sposed to be in the track! only after I attacked it did I look back at the track, and, low and behold, there was a ball in it! What on earth was going on here? how dare that ball think it could whap me! and on my head too! I was the only one sposed to be doing any whapping around here!

Again I leaned forward and whapped the ball in the track. Again the cube moved, and yet again, a ball whapped me on the top of the head! Really, this was too much, and I turned round to beat it up, but then I saw the ball in the track again! I couldn't stand it any longer. I put both of my paws out of my cube, and I whapped that ball until there was hardly any whap left in me! As I did though, the cube rolled right over and dumped me out onto the floor! I wasn't going to stand for this. Quick as a wink, I turned around, and with claws and teeth working on full power, I attacked. The cube had other ideas though. It rolled away from me. I chased, pounced, dived inside, but the cheeky cube rolled me over as it carried on on its merry way! Perhaps my wriggling inside it had something to do with the fact that it rolled, but I'm not so sure, you know. While I was attacking, I saw that ball again! I realised that it was stuck to the cube with a bit of elastic over one of the entrances. It was one of the cube's hanging toys! But right as I saw this, the ball in the track came back into view, and I just had to whap it. Then the other ball hit me and, and, oh friends, it was just too much, and the carpet was there and. Well, it asked for me to attack it. I promise! It really did ask for it, so I did! Thankfully, my human was too caught up in her computer to notice me doing any of this. Wouldn't it have been embarrassing if she was just pretending not to notice so that I wouldn't stop when I was having such a good time, and she saw the whole thing? I'm so glad my human is stupid sometimes...

Tuesday, 8 March 2011

It is, friends, and for quite a few reasons. Firstly and most importantly, it's a great day because that lazy bum of a human of mine has finally decided to commit my dictations to paper once more! ok, computer, not paper. It's been too long, and she hasn't even been visiting my friends for me! She says she's still sorting things out from the house move, that she's had a lot to deal with, yada, yada, yada. Does she think I care for her pathetic, pitiful excuses? Cuz I don't. The fact is, she's been neglecting me, and there's no excuse for that!

There's more good news. Last week I had to go to the new lady vet people cuz my chest was sounding all bad and wheezy again. She gave me some more yucky tablets to take, and I finished those this morning. The human took me back today for a check up, and other than having some staining on my teeth, the vet lady people said I was in great health! The human still says she can hear a wheeze in my purr, but the vet lady people couldn't hear a thing when she listened with the listening thing to my chest, so I say the human's being a worry wart again.

The other thing is mancats. My own lovely little mancat is now very far away from me thanks to my human deciding to move house, so I've had to find another one, but you know what? I've done it! There's another boy, and this one's so posh that he's actually international. Isn't that neat? He was imported into this country to live with his peoples because he was so outstanding. the human says he owns his own house too. She says he's had other girls before, but he's a man of the world. Where as my first mancat would take no for an answer, this mancat knows what he wants. She says that he'll show me that having fun with a mancat isn't so bad really. I'll confess that I saw the last one off cuz I was a bit nervous, but if the new one will show me the ropes, I might just let him milk and tuna me!

And the good news doesn't stop there! After being stuck in the house for a week, the human had someone come today to help her learn the way to places with her white stick. She was a nice ladypeople. When the human was getting her shoes on, she said that the lady people could have a cuddle if she liked. As I've told you before, I'm a bit nervous of strangers, but the human says that she wants to show me that I can trust them just like I trust her. She wants to show me that everybody I say hello to will be nice to me, so she passed me over to the lady people. Even though I wanted to, I didn't struggle. While the human went off to get ready, the lady people gave me scritches and rubs and told me all about the two mancats she owns. She said that it was Ok, that she wouldn't be horrible to me and that I could relax. I might have purred a teeny bit, but I'm not saying. I did stare after my human as she left the room to find her keys, but I didn't jump down from the lady people's lap cuz her scritches were quite nice. I wonder, can other peoples be trusted? I mean, really trusted?

The human says that the HG is coming to see us on Saturday and is staying until Tuesday! I got real excited about this until I heard the next things. The HG is bringing her manpeople with her, and he's not so keen on cats. She's also bringing a stupid Dogface. Her stupid dogface is called Nikki, and does the same job as the human's stupid dogface did for her. She stops the HG from walking into things, and helps her find the way to go. I've decided that if she's like our stupid dogface and leaves me alone, I'll not mind her, but if she chases me or sniffs me, I'm gonna disappear. I can't be bothered with Dogfaces any more! Still, I can't wait to see the HG! Do you think she'll bring me toys? Or treats? Or tuna? Or nice stinky goodness? huh? The human says she's going to help with a practice show bath over the weekend. I'm not looking forward to that bit, but if the HG is there and she brings treats, then I'll put up with it for that... Maybe.

Ok, last bit of good news for today, but hasn't there been a lot! This is the biggest news for the human. Her friend's ladycat has just given birth to two happy, healthy, bouncing boy Burmese kittens! The people who belongs to the ladycat has been talking to the human and telling her all about the pregnancy so that she'll know better what to expect when I have my babies later this year, so the human almost feels as though she's had a part in the kittens who've just been born. It made her day! I can't say that I cared as much as she did. After all, I didn't know the ladycat. But I hope that mummycat and babies continue to do well and thrive. If you like, I'll have the human keep you updated on all the goings on with them!

Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Friends, at long last, we're back! I think this has been the longest we've gone without posting, and I'm even starting to feel withdrawal symptoms. Is that normal?

Even though it's been a whole week, there's not much to tell you as the majority of the time was spent with the human putting things into boxes, then putting the boxes in a big, big, huge thing that moves like a car but isn't a car (she says it's called a van), then getting to the new place and getting the boxes out of the monster car and taking the things out of the boxes. It all seems a little long winded for me. I mean, what's the point in putting the boxes into the monster car if you're just going to take them back out again? Come to that, what's the point in putting the things into the boxes in the first place if you're just going to take them out again too! If the things have to go in the monster car, wouldn't it be quicker just to put all the things in the monster car and forget about the boxes?

There was lots for me to do and snoopervise this week. When they were bringing the boxes in and out of houses, they put me in my own little room to stop me darting out the door. They shouldn't have worried though. I'm not interested in going outside. As soon as everything was in though, I got to come out again.

Now I know that many of you cats would be stressed by a big house move like this, but I haven't been, really. I have to thank my human for this. I know, it's strange, isn't it? But peoples will occasionally get things right. The human took me to the new house a few times before we moved in. Then, when we got there for the last time when all our stuff would be coming, she did a few things. Firstly she held me on the journey down, and this meant that I felt safe and secure. she cleaned the litterbox of all the poop, but she didn't change the litter. She also let the litter stay in the box a while so that my peepee would smell quite strongly. Now normally this isn't a good thing, but when I got to the new place, one of the first things the human did was to put down that smelly litterbox and show me where it was. my smell was very strong in there, and as you know, there's nothing more comforting than your own smell. Right away I had a place that I knew was mine, even if that place was a stinky litterbox.

The human also took the little blanket that Hannah and Lucy sent in their Secret Paws package with us. I'd made it a little dirty cuz sometimes I like to eat my treats straight off the blanket, but again, the human didn't wash it before we left. In fact, for the last week or so, every time she picked me up, she cuddled me on that blanket to make sure it smelled like me too. That went in my PTU for the journey, and then when we got there, it went onto one of the sofa cushions so that it smelled like me too.

All of the peoples that helped us move in were real nice to me, but I didn't have time to talk to them cuz of all the snoopervising I had to do. Wherever the human was, I had to be there also. Well, I was helping her decide on the best place to put all of our things, so I couldn't leave her side for a minute. oh, and guess what! I've taken over Dogface's old room where her bed used to be. now it's got all my things in like my toys and my PTUs and my litterbox. The human says it's a big cupboard that her and Dogman took the door off years ago when Dogface first came to live here (the human lived here when she first got Dogface). The cupboard was huge and wasn't being used, and as it opens right onto the hallway, it made a really cosy Dogface sleeping place when the front was taken off. Actually, without the door, it's basically just a big alcove in the hallway. It's super in there! I actually quite like hanging out near my litterbox now, just to ascert the fact that Dogface has lost her bedroom to me! Now there's the way things should be!

I've been hiding last night and today though. The human, as she always does, is worrying a little about this. She says that it's not like me to stick close to the litterbox and forego snuggling, so she's going to keep a good watch on me. I keep telling her that I might just finally have had enough of the stress of moving, but in her typical stupid way, she's refusing to listen.

Ah, it's so good to be back! Friends, you've gotta fill me in. Have I missed much?

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