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About Me

Ah, you don't really want to know, do you? You do? Gosh, how flattering. Well, I'm me, obviously. I'm a writer, baker of inedible cakes, mother of an indeterminate number of children (they keep moving, it's hard to count), dog owner, cat slave. Occupier of a crumbly old place in the crumbly old countryside in Yorkshire. And merciless self-publicist.

Sunday, 9 September 2012

BooQfest, where I shall be Appearing. It's all right, they're expecting me, it's not like I'm going to loom up or anything

This week...well, no, not this week, because that was this week and it was mostly full of lying down and fanning myself, but this coming week which, now I come to think of it is probably next week, I shall be attending a most exciting event, which is Northampton's BooQfest. Here I shall be doing a reading and a signing and also hopefully meeting some lovely people. I say 'hopefully', because there is often a distressing tendency for people to see me coming and run away and, since I do not have a very immediate turn of speed, although I can reach quite a velocity if someone holds up a HobNob on the horizon and makes dunking motions, sometimes they get away.

I'm doing some readings, there are workshops and all sorts of things and a lot of the Sci Fi community will be there, (Paul Magrs is someone I am hoping won't accelerate away too fast because I'd really like to hear what he has to say about things, particularly his cat, although I don't suppose that will be the main topic of his speakings). It all looks fantastically exciting and I can't wait to get there although I do have a fairly nebulous idea of where Northampton actually is. Apparently it is quite a big place but, as we all know, I have trouble navigating around my own house, and am noted for the time I once lost an entire supermarket, so don't get your hopes up about me arriving early or anything, I shall probably run, panting, into the Royal and Derngate two minutes before I am due to read, with the car parked outside on double yellow lines and the engine still running. Although, thinking about it, that will be ideal for the quick getaway I might need after I've done the whole 'fan' thing which I have planned for such luminaries as Joe Lidster and Gary Russell. I don't want to give too much away (they might be reading this, you never know, although I suspect not as no-one has ever heard of me and I shall probably draw an audience of one at these sessions, and that will be a small hedgehog who has wandered in out of the rain and has no intentions of buying a book) but it involves begging them to sign things for me.

Anyway. If you are anywhere near Northampton (or environs, as I am sure there are roads and things down there that you can travel to Northampton on, although I have yet to have this confirmed), you may wish to come along. It's free! Look, it's not just me speaking there, there are lots of wonderful, and far more interesting ones! Aw, go on....

Northampton. Apparently easy to get to

In other news, I recently visited a mast. It was on the top of the moor, and when I say 'the top' I mean a sheer vertical climb up which I had to scramble. There was panting, people, and sweat! There were also views, like this...

although I hate to disappoint you, Steve and Dog are not there all the time.... and also this

which is another picture of my attempt to do the Hokey Cokey at selected scenic locations throughout the UK. Oh, and if you're interested, the mast itself looks like this

But you're probably not.

Right, so. See you in Northampton! (she said, cheerfully still expecting only the hedgehog).

Oh, Nicola, I do hope so, for the sake of the BooQfest organisers more than me, I'm quite used to sitting in the middle of an empty room and making my own entertainment, but they may be embarrassed. When they see the sort of entertainment I make for myself, they certainly will be...

And Chris, I shall be round in the morning with my five photo albums and a suitcase full of loose prints, to talk you through all nine hundred shots of 'My Day at the Seaside'. You Have Been Warned.