Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do. This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the LORD your God is with you wherever you go. - Joshua 1:8-9

Today, I find myself struggling to focus and enter into connection with God during my quiet time. Days like today often make me want to just tune God out, and say, "I showed up, but you didn't, so now I'm leaving".

I know this is not true, but it is how I feel, the thoughts I am wrestling with, and the conflict within my heart. When I have days like this I only know of one thing to do and that is to search the Word of God - to meditate on His teachings - to remind myself of His everlasting love for me.

If I rely on my feelings to guide me - if I allow my thoughts to turn to action - then I know I will run from my Creator. And so, I go against my own will, I turn away from my feelings, and instead I turn to His truth and I try to obey. I chose to fulfill the need of my heart with life in the Spirit - not the flesh.

I may not feel like praising, praying, or meditating but I show up because I remember life outside of redemption and reconciliation. I remember what it feels like to worship the created instead of the Creator and I know I don't want that. I know I don't want to live with that shame or guilt. I know I need my King and Redeemer.

And so, I look for God to give me courage, to keep me strong, to help me feel his presence. I remember His promise to always be with Joshua. I remember that my feelings are a reflection of a heart longing for God and that I have a choice as to how I respond to those feelings. And today, I chose to meditate on God's Word, knowing that I will meet Him there.

LORD God, I pray that you will help me focus and connect with you today. I pray that I would experience your presence within me and be encouraged by your Word. Holy Spirit guide me as I feel distant and tempted to run. Jesus, help me to have your courage to fight off temptation - help me to live life in the Spirit. Amen.