Facial Abuse got a new cameraman... but filming naive skanks getting blunt force trauma to the vajayjay is really only half his craft. His true talent lies in his usage of the English vocabulary. He's like the Shakespeare of talking shit. Funny as fuck. Download all vids HERE. [Parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ]

Undoubtedly the most erotic thing I've seen since the time my 19 y/o housekeeper cried 'no es bueno' after happening upon my unflushed shitter. Day before was Olive Garden night, fuckin Tour Of Italy. To quote Lil Wayne - I made it rain. DOWNLOAD THE FULL VIDEO HERE.

This is legendary pipe layer Big Red, most notable for his 7 inch penis and it's not-so-cervix-friendly curvature. The end result tends to involve women screaming louder than Warwick Davis after the release of box office figures on Leprechaun 4: In Space. MORE HERE.

Whore #3 is quite adorable. She may not speak a lick of English, but her facial expressions certainly have a story to tell.. namely "ouch, that hurts", "please hurry up" and "why in the fuck did I quit my job at Hotdog On A Stick for this shit". Live and learn baby. SOURCES: 1. 2, 3, 4, 5.

Never have I seen a man do something so incredibly vile with such charm. Where there's tension, he provides laughter. Where there's pain, he provides comfort. And where there's feces on the tip of his penis... he provides dinner. Song HERE and 40 MINUTE VIDEO HERE.

Jackass-inspired stunt involving a weapons-grade slingshot and some cactus goes horribly right when the target, (a gypsy woman's anus), is met with a direct hit. And now I'm met with a direct boner. Circle of life. FULL VIDEO HERE.

My biggest turn on ever is Asian girls with stupid adorable accents and at least a B cup. This one ups the ante and sets a new standard. Kind of like Subways new Fritos stuffed crunchy chicken enchilada melt. I gotta get me one of those! FULL VIDEOS HERE.

When an Azn teenager is reluctant to finish getting ass fucked, it's this guy's cue to utilize a pro-wrestling style submission maneuver and ride it home. Featuring acting so good Kirk Cameron would shed a single tear. MORE.

An awkward 120 LB man-child thinks he has what it takes to make his porn debut with a pornstar that can't math. But even with the deer in headlights look in his eyes, he somehow pulls off the incredible. FULL SCENE HERE.