Kids on the Plane? Maybe I’ll Have That Drink

Rene Foss, a flight attendant for a major airline, has nothing against Cheerios or crayons. Or kids, for that matter. But put the three together in an airline system that’s more crowded and ridden with delays than ever and ... well, don’t get her started.

“They break up Cheerios all over the floor; they take crayons and write on the tray tables and window shades,” said Ms. Foss, who has written a humorous book about her career called “Around the World in a Bad Mood!”

“It really isn’t the kids’ faults, though,” she said. “It’s the parents from hell who don’t have control of their kids.”

As regular air travelers know all too well, it doesn’t take much to upset the fragile social equilibrium of a crowded airplane, perhaps just restless children toddling down the aisle or wailing (though wailing, it could be argued, is an entirely appropriate response to the hassles of air travel).

Maritz Research recently surveyed 1,000 people online who had flown in the last six months for feedback on how airlines could improve customer service. Nearly three-quarters suggested that airlines segregate families in their own section, away from other passengers.

Though Ms. Foss said misbehaving children were only a minority, the fear that one or more of them might be on board can loom large in the minds of travelers. And when an uncontrollable child happens to be on a flight, passengers may not have much sympathy for the parents, or the kid.

Earlier this year, a 3-year-old girl who threw a tantrum and refused to be belted into her seat was removed, along with her parents, from an AirTran Airways flight. AirTran reimbursed the parents for the flight, but when the parents went public with their protest, AirTran received more than 8,000 e-mail messages and phone calls — nearly all supporting the airline.

Ms. Foss, a flight attendant since 1985, says the way to maintain perspective in the air — even if a screaming infant is assailing your eardrums — is to grin and bear it. That’s what she does.

“Most airlines are working with minimum staff,” she said. “So you have two flight attendants, 12 unaccompanied minors, a handful of crying babies, four wheelchairs, a couple of air marshals, and some drunks.”

“It’s a circus on the fly, and I’m the happy clown!” she said cheerfully.

But for parents, it can be far from a happy experience.

Eileen Ogintz, author of the syndicated newspaper column “Taking the Kids” (www.takingthekids.com), said, “Flying with kids is just awful now, worse than it’s ever been because the hassle factor is so high.”

She said misbehaving children were not nearly as big a problem as the hurdles faced by parents traveling with children under any circumstances, as customer service deteriorates. “There are all these crazy incidents,” she said.

Ms. Ogintz mentioned the Sippy Cup Incident involving a mother pushing her 19-month-old son in a bag-laden stroller toward a security checkpoint at Ronald Reagan National Airport in Washington last month.

A security agent told the woman that the child’s sippy cup contained more than the allowable three ounces of liquid. The woman either poured or accidentally spilled the water on the floor. A security surveillance video showed the now-distraught woman — the Transportation Security Administration says she was disruptive and uncooperative; the woman denies it — being forced by a screener to crouch on the floor and use paper towels to wipe up the spill. Twice, because she missed a spot the first time.

Then there was the Benadryl Incident, also last month. A woman was sitting on an airplane with a child in Houston after a long delay. As the airplane finally taxied for takeoff, the toddler began repeating, “Bye-bye plane.”

A vexed flight attendant told the mother, “You need to shut your baby up,” and suggested a dose of Benadryl, according to news reports. When the mother said she wasn’t about to drug her son, the flight attendant went to the cockpit and told the pilot that the mother had threatened her. The plane returned to the gate, where mother and child were escorted off. Fellow passengers subsequently backed up the mother’s story.

“How ridiculous it this getting?” Ms. Ogintz asked. “At security checkpoints, I’ve seen screeners literally in a tug-of-war with toddlers over their ‘blankies,’ with the kids crying. Flying with children has always been dreadful. There was never anything easy about it for parents. But now it’s beyond the pale.”

Horror stories abound. On a recent flight from Florida to New York, a child cried incessantly, prompting exasperated passengers to yell suggestions to the mother, and not very politely. “Get up and walk the kid up and down the aisle,” commanded one. Babies have been among those stuck for 5, 8 or in some cases more than 10 hours on stranded planes, without food or much more than a sip of water. Think about it.

Peter Scott, of Coarsegold, Calif., said he and his wife, Anne, were flying from Fresno to connect in Dallas to visit family in Birmingham, Ala., last Dec. 29 — a day when bad weather forced dozens of airlines to be diverted from Dallas to other airports. Many airplanes sat for six or more hours as food ran out and, in some cases, toilets overflowed. The Scotts were flying with their two daughters, ages 3 and 1.

“We sat on that parked plane for eight hours, but I think we did a pretty good job,” Mr. Scott said. “Before we left home I overstocked on snack food, grabbed anything that was loose in the kitchen — bananas, apples. My wife thought I was crazy, but it turned out I was prepared.”

A version of this article appears in print on , on page WK3 of the New York edition with the headline: Kids on the Plane? Maybe I’ll Have That Drink. Order Reprints|Today's Paper|Subscribe