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Hipsters Search for the Next thing to Ruin

Members of unconventional Subreddits, the themed discussion forums on popular social media site Reddit, have called for a Royal Commission into hipster practices amid claims they’ve ruined a raft of everyday things, including everything from coffee to bicycles and facial hair.

A petition signed by thousands of Subreddit moderators warns that “nothing is safe” and “fleeting hipster adoption of an interest, activity or style choice can destroy it forever”.

“A few years back vinyl records took a bearded beating,” said Ron Scott, a moderator for Subreddit dedicated to remote-controlled cars. “We even dropped our retro remote-controlled car section just in case some of these tattooed folks caught on, which seems to have foiled them. For now…”

Bob Jenkins, a moderator for a vintage motorcycle Subreddit said he initially saw the attention as a positive thing. “Our subscription base tripled overnight!” he said. “But things turned sour when discussions about engines and track days started becoming overrun by conversations about which jacket stitching looks the coolest and which sticky tape to use to make an X on a headlamp. The moment someone asked which beard wax best deals with wind, I knew we were done.”

Several other Subreddit spokespeople, who spoke to Sydney Sentinel on condition of anonymity, confirmed they had also signed the petition but asked that their interest groups not be mentioned by name, for fear of attracting “the wrong kind of attention”.