Why is it that?

Why is it that…

– I only run into my neighbors hot doctor son when it’s been one of ‘those’ nights/mornings. Seriously, S has been sick for days, A got it yesterday and was up at 4:45 this morning. I was outside in yoga pants and a sweatshirt, dirty greasy hair in a messy ponytail and probably still had frosting on my face from the cupcake I ate for breakfast. Now he’ll never knock on my door and sweep me off my feet.

– The doorbell only rings when the toddler has underwear on her head? I so wonder what the neighbors think of us.

– Your kid pukes all over the car when there is no place to pull over and clean up. This is of course on the way home from the doctors office where they pronounce her perfectly healthy. God damn liars.