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R.I.P to relationships – We are so much cooler online

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My generation will be the last to remember the nerve racking feeling of calling a crush on their home phone, praying to the adolescent gods their parents don’t answer. My generation will be the last to remember the significance of each text message sent and received, because texting plans were new and very limited.

“Text messages? Why should I pay an extra $10.00 a month for you to pass a note through your phone. Just call them”, my dad used to say. Again, leaving me faced the risky reality of please-dont-let-your-parents-answer-my-call roulette.

I come from a relatively small town. There were a handful of high schools in the area. After graduating, a lot of kids head off to college, and in time most migrate back. Through the growth of social networking, there is a general population in my age group who know of each other (mostly without actually knowing anything about each other)

On many occasions I have been out and crossed paths with people I “know of” – Either nodding my way through awkward pleasantries, or returning the favor of zero acknowledgement from the other person.

Thinks to self:: “You favorite my tweet from across the bar, but can’t say hello?”

As a single girl in my mid 20’s, I am starting to miss the butterflies as a result of real time interactions with the opposite sex. There is ZERO romance in casually playing off eye contact, then Facebook messaging me the next morning.

Actual Facebook message from boy to chicken shit to talk to me…

:::Name and picture have been altered to save whatever ounce of dignity this guy has left. On that note, his man card has definitely been revoked in my book.::: Hey, at least he had the decency to ask if I had a boyfriend. At this rate, that question is becoming rhetorical. Bahah, Boyfriend!? With your inbox maybe…. Is it just me, or did that sound naughty?

I understand a lot of girls are bitches. They go out to flirt for drinks, they shoot down compliments and label men as “thirsty” (Please, do not judge me for the use of “thirsty”. I see condescending females referencing guys as “thirsty” on twitter – Eeeeeeeven though, in my opinion, these said females seem to be “thirsty” for the attention. BUT that is another rant I shall save for another time). With that being said, I still am a firm believer in human interaction upon meeting. Sure guys, you may strike out or get shot down. GOOD! Then you know that girl is NOT worth your time.

I am not conceited enough to think every guy who approaches me is hitting on me, unlike the Lily Pulitzer wearing trophy wife social snob wanna bes mention in paragraph above (Disclaimer: Im not judging Lily, I have a Lily Pulitzer planner for work that I could not live without. The bright colors are fun, and it keeps me organized. That reference is simply for picture painting purposes). However, I am saying facebook, twitter, instagram, text messages ect have made meeting new people really LAME.

One bright side to social media, I can confirm the next day if my beer goggles were misleading me.