Search

Once again, folks, I present some of the peculiar albeit hilarious internet searches that led people to The Cubicle Rebel blog here on WordPress.com.

It is a sheer joy of mine to see what people enter into search engines. It makes me think my ideal job would be to work at GOOGLE in the internet searches department where all day I could wear comfy shoes and tattered jeans while sipping peppermint tea and howling at the very subjects and search terms that people use to find whatever it is they’re searching for.

This is a mere sampling, of course. As always, my own musings appear in bold. Stick around for the one that takes the cake at the end.

1. introvert eager to date (Awwww.)

2. piece of glitter stuck on eyeball (Um, perhaps you shouldn’t be typing right now.)

3. erratic (Seriously, does the internet think I’m erratic? This particularly disturbs me because this word always appears in searches that leads people to this blog. I think I need to see a therapist.)

4. how to build epic cubicle like a sir (Looks like the guy who thinks he’s a wizard got loose.)

5. tissue in pickup truck (WHAT?)

6. plantar fasciitis typing (So your feet hurt while your typing?)

7. pain in her high heels (Who’s “her”?)

8. evil lunch lady (Seems many of us have one.)

9. why do some people have road rage (Good question. Me wonders these things, too.)

10. it people

11. obesity mcdonalds around the corner pics (So you’re saying McDonalds ITSELF is obese and that it’s around the corner?)

Gosh, can you imagine working at Google’s search terms department and actually reading the GAZILLIONS of search terms people use?

On this blog alone I have experienced total, colossal humor. I mean, I have nearly left my chair laughing, HOWLING at the searches people have used that landed them here @ TheCubicleRebel blog.

I can’t help but wonder who some of these people are and especially what was going on in their day or life the moment they entered a given search term. Furthermore, while some searches leave no mystery I still wonder how some landed them at THIS blog. Read on…(My own musings appear in italics.)

creepy mcdonalds

starbucks cult

public toilet cubicle

dachshund puppies for sale in nashville tennessee(Okkkkk. I don’t think the word Nashville is even in this blog.)

How to avoid annoying coworkers

why cant i hear any fireworks

notes to write down call for bos(Sure hope this person isn’t taking notes for their “bos.”)

germ died

“muffins”

beste barbecue sauce

egg sandwich cartoon

germs on door handles

kfc disgust

kfc crumbs (I’m wondering how one could tell that crumbs are specific to, um, KFC.)

i have server job (Okkkk.)

harga kursi executive staff (Whaaaaaaaaaat?)

using hands job interview

dachshund miniatura sp 2012

noise etiquette in the workplace

called whacky and clueless by coworkers (LOL!)

it’s a short work week

immagini mc donalds

boy and girl beating(Um, not sure what to make of this one.)

gilmore girls caps my pet(Or this one.)

does dr phil have private sessions with individuals (I wonder the same thing!)

muscle chicken (Yikes!)

sherri shepherd teeth (Yikes again!)

annoys me when women refer to female staff as “girls”

teckel dog

my heel hurt when i put it on the floor (Sounds like plantar fasciitis. Been there, STILL there. Ouch!)

pie chart of caffeine’s effects on sportsmen

cubicle roofs(Oh my…There are “roofs” on cubicles now? Boy, I HAVE been away a long time.)

my coworker types too loud (Been there, done that. I still remember the job AND the hard typing guy’s name and this was double-digit years ago.)

addressing gum poppers

fonger clicking sounds at workplace

annoying cowirker popping gum

cartoon cheese rolls

annoying coworker bubble gum

china auto (Um, HUH?)

annoying gum chewers

white dogs (What the…?)

gum in cubicle

what to do with leftover muffins (LOL! LOL! LOL! WHO Googles this?)

“co worker typing too loud”

ugly people eating mcdonalds (Should I alert the police?)

colleague chewing gum popping bubbles anoying

unprofessional chocolate chip cookie (Oh gosh, I can’t even SPEAK, this is so funny.)

office hell cubicle

big boy burger logo

tongue scraper before and after

why are cubicles gray

Once again, the gum poppers and loud typers are really grating the nerves of fellow coworkers. I wonder how we can get the word out to these clueless instigators. I’ll work on that…as a procrastinator.

I did a 30-day pull of the exact searches that led people to this blog and here we go again. My own musings appear in bold beside the corresponding search term. (Hang on, this is a long and HILARIOUS one!)

cubicle hell

disgusting sandwich cartoon

annoying donut (I feel sorry for that donut.)

a person who types very loud

annoying co worker on the phone

ed batka (Um, WHO?)

co worker sighing constantly

mean lunch lady

red doxie puppies

she pop

girl with stank breath

waitress and and the crazy child

cat cubicles boss lolz

coworkers fondeling stories (OH BOY.)

why does everyone pretend that the tv show “all the kids on the block” has never existed (WHAT in the WORLD?)

team player crap

miniature daschund puppies for sale in nc

halitosis in cubicles

this device will let co-worker know she’s too loud (Uh-oh.)

drug strength

vending machine in egypt

best part of my jobs swivel chair

corn lady

hygiene lunch lady

is it illegal to fart in an elevator (LOL!)

coworker chews ice all day

cult like workplace drink the kool aid

Here’s the one that takes the cake:

“please, i need this job” legs.

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

I may never get rid of this blog just for the sheer joy/comedy of the search terms alone. I must say, however, it makes me feel better knowing that I’m not the only one who is so (easily) annoyed by coworkers’ habits and nuances. Hee hee.