Daylight Savings Time is not real. The clocks are not "turned forward" -- what actually happens is that the Bavarian Illuminati, the Council of Seven, the G-8, and the Rosacrucians, all working for the Bohemian Club, actually make the Earth rotate faster. In the Fall, of course, they make it slow down. That's why winter days can seem so long, while summer evenings go by so quickly.

I live 50 Yards from Holyrood park, in Edinburgh. A steep 700 foot hill in the middle of the city makes a really nice break. I just watched the sun rise over the hump of it called Sampsons ribs. Not too much wildlife, except a huge selection of Corvids, and a guy who flies a large kite off it on windy days, at the edge of a 150 ft drop.

My back yard backs up to the Highland Golf Course. No crawdads, but I did see a couple of dads with their young 'uns out there walking/running around this evening. No coyotes, either, but the neighbors' dachshund has found a way through the fence. I've found some rather expensive golf balls in my backyard, and have wondered about the poor old golfs who lost them and how their love lives are doing. But the best of all is during the Summer, when we can eat dinner on the porch and watch the golfers -- someday the City is gonna charge an entertainment tax -- and the sun gradually sink behind the Western mountains 70 miles away.

My yard is on Sycamore Creek, a year 'round tributary of the Trinity River. There is a magic and a connectedness to the natural world I find even on a little creek like this that is so much larger than just having a lot in town with a house on it. (And that's no BS!)

No crawdads, that I've seen, but we seem to have some really big freshwater clams. I've found shells as much as 5 and 6 inches across. Fish, turtles, snakes, lots and lots of birds. Coyotes, foxes, skunks, possums, and children who play along the banks.

Suckin da head of da mudbug, that's what da people do.Rip da head offin' da creek craband suck in all da goo.I'd like to get me some crawdad'sboil 'em up like a stew,but da juice and da fat in da river lobster's head, I think I will give to you.

Yes it do. Only around here "bayou" doesn't have a really distinctive meaning. In Louisiana it seems to pretty much mean a swamp with a creek running through it. We have one or two of them, but we have several bayous that would be called rivers in most places. No swampiness, just running water. The one my friend live on, Bayou Texar (pronounced "tayhar" - Spanish style), is really a river. But it's much more mellow than the Mississippi.

You buy them beignets and I'll eat 'em for you. 'Course, you'll have to fly me down to N'awlins since they're only good sittin' in the Cafe du Monde and watching The River go by. I'll even eat that etoufee, too, for ya. I'm just one nice guy, that's all.

And why does the Google ad want me to buy beignets from the Cafe du Monde? What do beignets have to do with BS or folk music? They're not even real coon-ass food. Crawfish ettoufe' is real coon-ass food.

"78910", huh? Let's see... It's taken almost two years to get to 7,000 posts. But the rate of posting seems to be rising exponentially, helped along by nitwits like Flamingo Ted who post 20 blank posts per 100 trying to capture the mystical hundredth post. So, at the current rate of postal acceleration we should be to post #78,910 somewhere around, oh... the end of this May? That would require that posting accelerate to something in the 5,000 posts-per-day range by mid-April. Yeah, we can do that.

I take it back, I will get into the number game. I get dibbs on thread number 78910. (thanks Bee-dubya)

Hello back at ya' Tweed. Tweed you around here? Have you ever seen Jim Belushi and the Sacred Hearts? I'm going to see them tomorrow night. I've never seen them or even heard their music but reading about them they sound 'Kick-Ass'and full of talent. I read Jim does at least one back flip per show and dances on the tables.

danged if today isn't the most monday of fridays I've had in a long time. e-mail service is down; my brother-in-law has an undetermined "leak" in his circulatory system - the cats are pissed at me because I went to bed last night instead of staying up until they decided to come inside - its still feekin' snowing outside; and to top it all off my seedless orange has pits in it!!!!

November 19, 1999 (11/19/1999) was the last date with all odd numbers until November 11, 3111 (11/11/3111). That's using the convention of writing, say, March as "03" instead of just "3". Ignoring that convention, January 1, 3111 (1/1/3111) will be next.

February 2, 2000 (02/02/2000) was the first date with all even numbers since August 28, 888 (08/28/0888). The last date with all even numbers before the year 3000 will, of course, be August 28, 2888 (08/28/2888).

This all assumes that no major shifts in lunar or planetary orbits entail major revisions of the calendar. But that's probably a moot point since any such shifts will probably also mean the end of human life upon Earth anyway. And if there are any human survivors living anywhere else by then they'll probably be using a calandar that's more in tune with the 477-day year of whatever their home planet is.

dammit ted! here I am wracking my brains (and that isn't easy - do you know how hard it is to wrack brains properly when you have onlyu one functional brain cell?) to come up with appropriate BS and you post blanks!

I finally made it back! I came and the front door was locked and I went to the back door and it was locked too! Moooo-oooom, who locked the back door? I was out and busy all day, and now so much has happened while I was gone. Did anyone make cookies? I need a cookie.

Thanks to the little site that came up in a Google search on "numbers poem" for something to fill in the posts. It would have been easier to let the thread alone and someone else nab the number (Rapaire seems to have been napping again--had he be around I'd have retired). But darn, these poachers who pop in just to snag a number chap my hide when they add nothing of substance to this BS thread (may I say that without being accused of committing an oxymoron?)

M-MOOOMMMMM!

Congratulations, Maggie. "6789" is, of course, the last number of its type we will see here until "12345".

Now, some would say that "7890" is next, but I say it doesn't qualify. I don't count "7, 8, 9, Zero". I count "7, 8, 9, Ten". If "7890" counts, then "8901" must count too and it obviously doesn't. It's on a par with playing Gin Rummy with "going around the corner" rules (playing J,K,Q,A,2). It's kid stuff. Grownups don't play that way.

Following from this linkage of MOAB to the entire universe, we can say with some confidence that the universe is closed.

MOAB comes back to the same points, often after only a short period of time. Now this implies that MOAB is closed. We can now expand this result to the cosmological scale, and prove without doubt the Universe is closed.

This result is of vast importance to all sorts of astronomers, and Shatner. I'm willing to share my Nobel prize with Bee-Dubya-ell, and list in references all prominent in the creation of MOAB ( Miniture Observable Astronomical Benchmark )

And any smart arses pointing out (1) MOAB is not closed, as closed things have big red labels on, or (2) We wander round in circles, not inhabit a closed phase space, will be silenced with a potent rutabaga based neurotoxin.

By the way, like the Universe itself, BS is not only expanding, but doing so at an ever-accelerating rate. It took almost three full months, from May 5th to August 3rd, for the first thousand MOAB posts to accumulate. But if one counts back a thousand posts from today, one finds that BS is now being posted to this thread at a rate of a thousand posts every forty-seven days! That's almost twice as fast as the rate for the first thousand posts!

At the current rate of acceleration, we should be posting a thousand posts of pure BS per day by 2016.