Reviewing Random Films For Fun

July 15, 2015

Stand By Me #MovieReview

Film 216 in the “1001 Films to See Before You Die” challenge is 1986’s “Stand By Me”. Based on Stephen King’s “The Body”, this Rob Reiner adventure drama is about four boys who go on a hike across the countryside to find the dead body of a missing child. Going into this film, I had only seen the Family Guy episode that looks at this and two other Stephen King novels, “Misery” and “The Shawshank Redemption”. I think Peter Griffin explains the film better than I can by saying “the boys went to look for a dead body but found themselves… And also a dead body” with Peter playing Gordie, Joe as Teddy, Quagmire as Chris and Cleveland as Vern. Enough about the cartoon, the film is a fantastic watch and I’m glad to have finally watched it. This is a film that I can recommend. Everything about the film was great and everyone in the film did a great job. Again, I can’t do much but recommend this film. Even the soundtrack is good with classic 1950’s rock. Out of all the cast members, I think I only get to see one of them in one more film. That being River Phoenix in “My Own Private Idaho”. Fun Fact – the band Funeral for a Friend made a reference to this film in the song ” Stand by Me for the Millionth Time ” from their new album Chapter and Verse. The line is “I’ve sat and watched Stand by Me for the millionth time, it’s a lifeline. I wish I was Chris Chambers, but in truth I’m more like Vern”. If you have seen this film then let me know what you thought of it in the comments. Here is what I had to say while watching 1986’s “Stand By Me”

Film – Stand by Me
Year – 1986
Director – Rob Reiner
Written by – Bruce A. Evans, Raynold Gideon
Based On – “The Body” by Stephen King
Staring – Wil Wheaton, River Phoenix, Corey Feldman
IMDb Rating – 8.1/10
My Rating – 8.5/10
Length – 84 min (1h 24min)
Genre – Adventure, Drama
We open the film in the middle of nowhere with a man sat in a Jeep
Is this a flute version of “Stand By Me”?
Welcome to Castle Rock, Oregon
All kids had some form of tree house as a clubhouse
“A pile of shit has 1000 eyes”
Chris and Teddy are playing cards
Just tell the story Vern
“You guys wanna go see a dead body?”
Who buries a jar of pennies under their house?
Lets not tell anyone about the body while I spy on you
Lets find the body
Theres always one person who has to be different in the group
Gordie’s dad is doing a bad job at gardening
Flashback to when Gordie got a Yankee’s hat
Stealing milk money isn’t stealing?
Where did he get that gun from?
“JESUS”
How dare you call me an asshole
He was gonna burn him in the eye with a cig for calling him an asshole
Well… There goes my hat
Time to hike to find Roy’s body
How to kill time while hiking – SING
Shit! We forgot food
Overall… We have $2.37 for food
Time to play chicken with a train
How dare you ruin my moment?
Give me some skin and I’ll let you dug the train later
Back with the bullies who are playing mailbox baseball
Meanwhile, the boys have arrived at a junkyard
He’s trained his dog to bite peoples balls
Even cheating Gordie can’t win a race
Shout out to The Mickey Mouse Club and Annette’s boobs
All good decisions are decided by coin flip
We all got tails and Vern talks about a car crash
Gordie loses the coin flip and has to get food
At the store, Mr Quidacioluo reminds Gordie of the time he wrote a story in the paper
You don’t play football like your brother?
All that as $1.50! I’m shopping there
Gordie returns and sees his friends leaving
Gordie escapes just before Chopper can sic balls
How dare you call my dad a loony
Milo, the junkyard owner, challenges everyone to a fight
Better build Teddy’s confidence about his dad
Gordie suggests that we shouldn’t have a party about a dead body
Back with the bullies who talk about which religious girls you should shag
Don’t think that’s how you get a tattoo
Meanwhile, the boys sing “Lollipop”
“Everybody’s weird” – Ahem to that
Chris think Gordie will have a career while he, Teddy & Vern will be stuck making ashtrays
Question of the film – Who would win – Mighty Mouse vs Superman
Since when did Chris become the voice of reason
“Everyday” by Buddy Holly – Pretty good soundtrack so far
That is not a bridge I wanna be crossing
You can always tell when a trains coming as the tracks will vibrate
Seriously Vern! You’re crawling across the bridge
NO!!!! NOT THE COMB!!!!
TRAIN!!!!!
Now is not the time to be scared
At the last second, Gordie and Vern dive off the bridge
Time for camp
“Nothing like a smoke after a meal”
It wouldn’t be camp without a story
Vern… SHUT UP!!!
Lardass Hogan – Hulk Hogan’s original game
Flashback to the Pie Eating Contest
The champion, Bill, just tripped Lardass
And we’re off!!!
They’re not eating the whole thing! That’s not finished
Despite picking on him, Lardass is the favourite to win
Before the contest, Lardass drank an entire bottle of caster oil and an egg
Is Lardass going to puke?
Lardass just puked on the champ
This just turned into a puking comtest
Wait… So Lardass won because everyone puked
Lets sleep while talking about life
Is it coyotes or a ghost?
While everyone sleeps, Teddy stands guard while making army references
Vern’s turn and he is scared of everything
Chris’s turn and he’s bored
Erm… Is Gordie having a bad dream?
Yep… He’s dreaming about his brother’s funeral
Chris and Gordie decide to chat while on guard about college courses
Chris tells the story about stealing the milk money and says he was robbed by a teacher
The next morning and Gordie has found Bambi
Lets continue hiking toward the Royal River
Back with the bullies who discuss the dead body
Lets pretend to go fishing while we look for the body
Looks like we gotta cross this pond
That pond isn’t something they should be swimming in
Yep… LEECHES!!!!
Shit! There’s a leech on Gordie’s….
That leech just bit his penis
Fuck him up Vern fuck him up
“Yakety Yak”
Let’s race to the body
So… Ace made a truck crash so he can win the race
The boys have found the road! Now to find the body
Vern has found the body
Better make a stretcher out of sticks and carry him back home
Gordie starts crying as he thinks his dad hates him
Ace and Eyeball have arrived
Vern runs away as Teddy mocks Vern’s brother
Ace is about to stab Chris but Gordie stops everything with the gun
Now Gordie wants to kill Ace
Ace and his gang leave
The boys hike home as we are told that they made a phone call
See you all at school
Can someone that young really be on the “10 Most Wanted List”?
The Writer tells us that Vern got married, had four kids and works at a lumber yard
Teddy failed to get in the army and is in jail
Chris went to college and became a lawyer but sadly died
Cut to an old Gordie who has been telling us this story
“I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?”
I hope you saved that
THE END
Now we get “Stand by Me” by Ben E King