Drunken Danes Strike For Workplace Drinking

By consumerist.comMarch 24, 2006

The Danes — long used to the luxury of boozing it up with a flagon of ale through their breaks and then stumbling back to the mill to use their omni-digital and claw-like hands to tremblingly feed another log through the buzz saw — are up in arms over attempts to curtail their lunchtime inebriation.

Weary of the endless refrains of “How Dry I Am” surging through their factories, not to mention the inherent inefficiency of workplaces dominated by drunken self-mutilation, Danish factory owners have spent the last few years trying to curtail workplace boozing. Although three years ago, 75% of factory cantinas sold beer, that number has dwindled to a paltry 13%.

But the workers, perhaps led by their union spokesman (right), are fighting back!

Last year, Harboe Brewery workers went on strike for two days after being told to stop drinking beer while working.

The strike went ahead even though their quota of six bottles of beer per day would have remained unchanged.

The order merely said they would have to go for a break to enjoy their beer.

God bless the Danes. And don’t you just want your blue-collar employees tripping over the six empty beer bottles at their feet when operating that industrial welder?