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almost married

Hi, i dont know if this is the right thread for this. anyway, admins pa delete na lang if ever may ganito. thanks. ok, i am a guy, 26 yrs of age. i am engaged and will be married late this year. i have these strange feelings that i cant explain if it is normal or what. i have these urges to go to bars, make new friends, and have CS. me and my girl has been together for 3 yrs now. and i just want to meet new faces and experience what other SINGLE guys do BEFORE they got married. i haven't had sex with any one other than my girl (and my ex). one of my friends always tell me that, "pare, kita mo ko, happily married, kasi... i was able to to all the things i want to do before i got married. so ikaw? ready ka na ba?" i told my girl about this (ok ok, im stupid, but i am also honest).. so what do you think? is this still normal.. this is actually a loooong story that i cut short. most of you might not read this and just ignore it if you see a 10 page post.. TIA.

Natural to feel this way but if you really want to do so, don't get married and let your fiancee be with someone else. Someone who has gotten it out of his system and is ready to take on the responsibilities of marriage.

ts..you were not only honest here.. you were also unkind, having said that, I will not discount your feelings for they are valid.. but be fair to your girlfriend and do the right thing. You're only 26, I think youre not ready yet to take it to the next level.. marriage is really a huge deal.. you've got to be prepared mentally, spritually and emotionally... the fact that your having these thoughts is already an indication that youre still incapable of committing to your fiancee for life.

one of my friends always tell me that, "pare, kita mo ko, happily married, kasi... i was able to to all the things i want to do before i got married. so ikaw? ready ka na ba?" i told my girl about this (ok ok, im stupid, but i am also honest).. so what do you think? is this still normal..

TS, tanong ko lang... how would you feel if the situation were reversed, or if you and your fiancee both want to fulfill your wild desires with others before getting married? Would you still consider that to be "normal?"

Have you reached emotional maturity to settle down with just the woman you have proposed marriage to? If not, it would be better to call off the wedding for now and sow your wild oats first... just be careful not to get STD and/or sire illegitimate kids along the way.

Thanks for all the replies.. If the situation was reversed or both of us wanted it to happen..... Uhm, i dont think i can live my life thinkin' that my wife slept with other men and i knew about it all along. Also, is the lack of sex a factor here? We are both workaholic, hardly have the time to have sex. She gave me an option na, we break up muna then after a few months of being single we sit down and talk if we still want to get married. And in those months that we will be apart, its like we never know each other. not a "hi" or a "hello"... i am afraid to lose her, but also i want to live my life a little.

She gave me an option na, we break up muna then after a few months of being single we sit down and talk if we still want to get married. And in those months that we will be apart, its like we never know each other. not a "hi" or a "hello"... i am afraid to lose her, but also i want to live my life a little.

ts, you cant have your cake and eat it too.. you cant do all those things (like have casual sex) and expect your girl to sit idly by. She seems really smart for she is giving you time to "live your life" and later decide what you really want. The reason she doesnt want to communicate with you while you are gallivanting is because she doesnt need to know.. she has to protect herself.. believe it or not, she has feelings too. :rolleyes:

I dont think the lack of sex between the 2 of you is the real issue here. If it is then you should have sought ways to resolve this..to have time for each other but instead you've been wanting to get it from somebody else. If your willing to risk your relationship for something as petty as to have a fling before settling down then go for it.. it's your life anyway. :hmm: Good luck..!

Well you should do it if it's so important for you to get it out your system. Then later on don't go on weeping when she finds someone else.

Happened to a friend of mine. They were together from highschool till they were 25. He broke up with her saying "I want to be single and experience singlehood". She agreed.

And then some years later, she met someone else and got married. when she was about to get married, her family told him to stay away. He really wanted to see her kasi. But she told him to leave her be. So he did.

To-date he's still single at 40. He dates women left and right who remind him of his ex but ending it when he gets to know the girl better and finds her personality is different from his ex. Constantly wishing he never let his ex go. Even keeps a picture of his ex on his mantelpiece.

I once told him, well you can always hope they get divorced (kasi they are both based in the US). He said, if they ever get divorced, I'll be there asking for her hand in marriage the soonest their divorce is final.

Sad no?

Pero TS, you wouldn't realize it because you're too busy thinking about loss of freedom and having fun at this point. You'll only realize it once you lose her to someone else.

Well you should do it if it's so important for you to get it out your system. Then later on don't go on weeping when she finds someone else.

Happened to a friend of mine. They were together from highschool till they were 25. He broke up with her saying "I want to be single and experience singlehood". She agreed.

And then some years later, she met someone else and got married. when she was about to get married, her family told him to stay away. He really wanted to see her kasi. But she told him to leave her be. So he did.

To-date he's still single at 40. He dates women left and right who remind him of his ex but ending it when he gets to know the girl better and finds her personality is different from his ex. Constantly wishing he never let his ex go. Even keeps a picture of his ex on his mantelpiece.

I once told him, well you can always hope they get divorced (kasi they are both based in the US). He said, if they ever get divorced, I'll be there asking for her hand in marriage the soonest their divorce is final.

Sad no?

Pero TS, you wouldn't realize it because you're too busy thinking about loss of freedom and having fun at this point. You'll only realize it once you lose her to someone else.

Think about it.

ouch... ang sakit naman nun :(

on the other hand, i have this friend, too... he's holding on to an 8-yr relationship kahit he fell out of love na kasi sayang daw yung 8 yrs nila... plus close na sila masyado to each other's families. so he's planning to go through with their wedding next year. di ko din alam ano i-advice ko sa kanya...

on the other hand, i have this friend, too... he's holding on to an 8-yr relationship kahit he fell out of love na kasi sayang daw yung 8 yrs nila... plus close na sila masyado to each other's families. so he's planning to go through with their wedding next year. di ko din alam ano i-advice ko sa kanya...

actually i suspect that a lot of guys fall into this situation. they marry out of hiya.

actually i suspect that a lot of guys fall into this situation. they marry out of hiya.

either that or they just dont want to get out of their comfort zone. shempre a new relationship would mean they would have to start over again, get to know the other person's family and friends, new adjustments, etc etc

think about this, eh kung yan din ang ma feel ng fiance mo, she wants to have CS with every guy in town before tying the knot with you so she can enjoy her "singlehood",what do you think?
Sana lang huwag ka magka AIDS sa mga ka CS mo

TS, the question is ARE YOU READY na ba talaga? kasi if you are ready you won't be thinking about these things.

i asked my then fiance kung talaga bang ready na sya magpakasal. i was asking him every day until the wedding day. i told him na pwede pa sya umatras hehehe... but luckily, my husband is really ready na talaga.