I once asked a man what he was passionate about and he replied, leadership. “Leadership of what?” I asked. “I just want to be a leader, it doesn’t matter what.”

I could be wrong, but that sounds a bit like a power grab to me.

It’s a bit sad, if you ask me. But it’s not an unusual answer.

So many of us seek the most coveted position, which isn’t a bad thing if we’re seeking it in an area that we are passionate about and we have the gift-set, but when we want it just for the sake of having it, we will find ourselves in an excruciating uphill journey that feels mostly like trying to run quickly under water.

Worst of all, we’ll not be happy with the experience.

Co Co had it right. I think she knew well that putting aside our wish to be something, and seeking to be true to who we are and act from where we are passionate, immediately releases us from unnecessary cares.

How do you recognize the difference between what is good for you and bad for you? Does fun mean bad? Does safe mean good?

How do you balance security and risk? When is it best to tread carefully? When should you throw caution to the wind?

How do you evaluate your need and their need? When do you sacrifice yourself for the good of someone else? When do your sacrifices border enabling?

Living only for our own comfort is the worst kind of extravagance; and truly brings no satisfaction in the end. And a life of consistently compromising ourselves to accommodate the agendas of others only serves to annihilate us and the gifts we could share with the world.

Can we ever really know the danger from the dance? I don’t think we can. At least not until our decisions finally play themselves out. But a really good indicator that we’re making the right decision may be to question our motives for the choices we make.

Life is the most amazing miracle ever! You and I are pretty lucky just to be alive. The odds of our parents even meeting were 1 in 20,000. The odds that they would stay together long enough to have children were 1 in 2000.

And that’s just your parents, the odds are so much smaller when you consider all the other variables!

We could spend our entire lifetimes just marveling about how our heart pumps blood through our vessels, how our lungs take in oxygen and expel carbon dioxide, the way our body works to sustain and repair itself and keep us going without any conscious effort on our part.

If you think about it, it is really quite remarkable!

But life is so much more than that. Life is about learning how to love and respect ourselves, our loved ones, our neighbours, our beautiful planet, and all the abundant life that exists on its surface. Life provides us an opportunity to exercise compassion, practice sacrifice, overcome fear and grow in courage and humility.

There was a time when it was considered good and sensible to accept one’s lot in life with grace and gratitude. A time when if your father was a servant, it would follow that you would be a servant, and your son would be a servant.

These days, we tell ourselves that we can be whoever we want to be. Some folks achieve their dreams, many don’t.

I wonder have we set ourselves up for failure and ultimately, a life of misery because of it?

Just as with any stream of contemporary thought in any given time in human history, when we examine our ideals over a long period of time, we discover that the pendulum has swung from one extreme to another.

So I find myself thinking it best that the pendulum rest somewhere in the middle.

That it doesn’t have to be completely this way or that.

That purpose can be found in this way AND that.

That any person using their unique gifts can set their world on fire; no matter their station in life.

Mother Theresa was referring to the masses of people she cared for during her life with the above quote. But the wisdom in the quote can apply to many situations. I often apply this principle when working on something big.

Whether you’re looking to improve the lives of a specific group of individuals like the poor, the sick, elderly, oppressed, vulnerable or working on a complex personal goal,

or your goal is to create a team that’s on page and working together for a common purpose or negotiating rules of engagement between several groups with varying needs,

or you’re tackling a project like constructing a building, planting or harvesting a crop, renovating your house or designing and implementing a functional system,

you can very easily become overwhelmed if you digest it all in one gulp. When an individual looks at the entirety of a cause, project, or goal, they can become swallowed up and paralyzed by the enormity of it all.

So it really does make sense to break it down into smaller, chewable pieces.

It means so much more than I can express in words, but I’m going to give it a shot!

On October 1st, I’m taking part in the Ride for Refuge to support a charity that’s very close to my heart – Oxford House Foundation of Canada.

I am so grateful to those of you who made a donation. Your support means so much to me, but more importantly it makes a huge difference in the life of someone in recovery living in an Oxford home.

To date, you have helped me raise $725. That translates to providing a safe and sober home for a man or woman in recovery for 133 days! And that’s just amazing – YOU are amazing!

Let me tell you why this matters so much to me; why I’ve decided to participate in the Ride for Refuge to support Oxford House.

As you might know, I’ve spent the last twenty-five plus years in the non-profit sector, working toward empowering some of the most vulnerable people to live their lives to the fullest. I have now found myself at Oxford House, an organization that helps men and women in recovery by providing a home – a safe place where they can be themselves and honest about their situation. Where they can get support from experienced and caring support workers. Where they can be supported by, and provide support for, their roommates who are taking the same journey toward an enriched and full life equipped with the tools they need to stay sober.

I’ve only been at Oxford House for a little over a year and have met so many amazing people through Oxford House, like John, who made an insane amount of money up north and fell headfirst into addiction. When he was finally ready to take his life back, he found his way to Oxford House where he found a job with way less pay than he was used to, yet allowed him the space he needed to work on his sobriety and help others along the way by volunteering at meetings. To his amazement, John was able to save more money than he thought possible because he was no longer feeding his addiction. John has come a long way since he first landed on our doorstep. He continues to go to meetings, work with sponsees and share his story.

John plans to marry his girlfriend soon and has just purchased his first home. I am so proud of John, and so proud to work with the amazing and passionate team at Oxford House as they help countless other men and women to take their lives back.

So thank you so much for supporting my ride. You are making a huge difference!

Can I ask one more thing of you? Would you kindly share this post with others in the blogosphere or Facebook, Twitter, etc., who may be interested in supporting me on my ride to help others like John?

Donations to this worthy cause can be made securely through the link below – using credit card or Paypal, and your friends will receive a charitable receipt immediately.

Maybe your mom used to tell you that idle hands were the devil’s workshop. She may have felt that if you weren’t working on something productive you would end up getting into some kind of trouble.

I’m sure we can all recall times when we longed for our muse to inspire us, hoped for that next great idea that would catapult us into fame, desperately tried to move past the latest round of writer’s block…

So when I read the above quote it reminded me that inspiration doesn’t just present itself to you on a silver platter. Inspiration typically hits after a long and arduous period of hard work and/or an I-wanna–poke-my-eye-out-with-a-screwdriver monotonous time period.

It’s while we’re living our lives, doing those mundane tasks with loved ones, co-workers and sharing our thoughts and hopes and dreams with each other. It’s when we do something, anything that is productive while letting the inkling of ideas turn themselves over and ruminate and bloom in the back of our minds that inspiration begins to reveal herself.

Love is a word we don’t always feel comfortable using in North America. It’s a word that is limited to how we feel about our lover or our family. To use the word love with any other person can be awkward at best.

Sure we use it as in loving humankind or nature or science or a cause or for activities like bowling, cycling, reading, running, or whatever you love to do. But you won’t catch us referencing it about the letter carrier, a co-worker or neighbor.

And that’s too bad really.

Because even if you have a degree, or years of experience, or you can do whatever it is you do while blindfolded with your hands tied behind your back, it’s just a lot of noise if it’s done without love.

And every time we interact with someone, whether teaching them, listening to them, helping them we can accomplish so much more and make them and ourselves feel so much more valued, if our motivation is love.

I had dinner with an old friend last night to celebrate her newly acquired PhD. I’m proud of her, it’s been a long time coming!

This is an exciting time for her, but now what? Now that it’s done she wonders what she should do next; realizing she is no longer happy in her current job.

A job that I once had came up in the conversation. It was my first position after having left a career I had loved. I soon knew that this new position wasn’t the job for me. But having signed a contract I stayed for a year, all the while learning important skills I would need when I launched The Other Bottom Line. And I loved the work I did with my consultancy, all of it, except the marketing of myself!

I guess sometimes knowing what you don’t want is the beginning of understanding what you really want.

This last week has served to remind me how much I value, and how important community is. Community, or a sense of belonging if you will, drives us to discover the things we have in common and start from there to create something beautiful together.

On Thursday night from 6:30PM to 3:30AM on Friday, I volunteered with a group of people, some of whom I’d never met, at a local casino to raise funds for Oxford House Foundation of Canada. It was only the second time I’d ever worked a volunteer shift at a casino. And oh man, staying up all night is not as easy to bounce back from as it was in my twenties! A month or two ago I worked a day shift for another wonderful organization called Fresh Start.

I gotta tell ya, both volunteer shifts were incredibly fun in that I always like learning new things and I always love meeting new people. The outstanding part of this experience for me, has got to be the fact that over the two days that a non-profit organization hosts a casino, up to 40 volunteers are needed to make it work. And they all work together, very hard I might add, to benefit a specific charity.

It really is something of great value when opportunities like this arise and one is able to take part in them!

On the following Saturday, I was invited to speak to a group of about hundred people on fundraising. Fundraising is both a science and an art, and I focused my talk on the art.

The art is all about relationships. And relationships are all about two-way communication, learning from each other and adding and gaining value from working together. In essence, it’s about building community which just happens to be my core passion!

My talk was divided into parts including: Know yourself and know others. One of the best ways to build solid relationships is to connect through stories: telling your story, learning their story and building a story together.

In other words, my story with the challenges I’ve faced and the resolutions I’ve come to have shaped who I am, what I value, what I am passionate about and why. The same is true of your story. When I know myself and I know you and what your values and passions are, we can find ways to be together for the greater good to create a better world for all of us. We are committed through our common values, passion and goals.

Now that’s like magic to me! What could possibly be more meaningful than that?

~ HUMP DAY CHRONICLES ~

What is one of your favourite stories about working with a group toward a common goal? What was one of the challenges you have faced in your life that has made you who you are today? Which values did you adopt because of it? What are you passionate about?