I Got No Rhyme

Jake (Speaking): You think I'm embarrassed because I wished this musical into existence, when I should have wished for musical talent or rhythm or the ability to rhyme? Is that it?Adam (Speaking): Why don't you sing about it Jake?Jake (Speaking): I can't!Adam (Speaking): Why not?Jake (Speaking): Because ...Jake:I got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.I'm out of step and I don't belong. 'Cause when I try to stick my head in.I just ruin every ... wallet.Adam (Speaking): I think you mean "song." "Song" rhymes with "belong."Jake (Speaking): Oh, does it? I wouldn't know 'Cause ...Jake:I got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.I'm out of step and I really can't tell.I don't know why I'm discombobulated.It should be easy as ringing a ... tape dispenser.Adam (Speaking): Ringing a bell. "Bell" rhymes with "tell."Jake (Speaking): Why don't you show off a little more, Adam? 'Cause, you know ...Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid:He's got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.That's why the guy just won't sing along.His every attempt is a major disasterAdam (Speaking): (sigh)Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid:That just ruins every ... planet.Adam (Speaking): "Song!" "Song" rhymes with "along," not "planet." "Planet?" Where are you coming up with this stuff?Jake:It's really quite a pickle that I'm in.This is a race I'm bound to lose, 'cause I can't seem to ... potato.Adam (Speaking): "Win!"Jake:I got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.It's catastrophic. I'm sure that you've heard.I don't know why. I don't have a reason.I never can come up with a ... motorcycle.Adam (Speaking): "Word!"Jake (Speaking): If you say so.Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid:There's no explanation for his crime.Doo doo.He wished us in this musical and has no sense of ... firetrucks!Adam (Speaking): "Time"! Or is it "rhyme?"Jake (Speaking): See? It's hard!Jake:I got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.I hear the music and I don't stand a chance.Cuz I can't sing and I'm not a hoofer.Just see what happens when I try to ... spasm.(Jake spazzes out)Adam (Speaking): I think you mean "dance."Jake (Speaking): No, actually "spasm" is the right word for what I'm doing. Because ...Jake:I got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.I guess it's time I take back my wish.We'll all be fine and right back to normalSoon as I find that magical ... dog.David (Speaking): "Fish!" "Wish" rhymes with "fish," not "dog."Jake (Speaking): No, seriously. I thought you were a dog. Anyway, if you could just rescind my order. Here's a little something for your trouble.David:Sorry, but I can't accept your dime.The spell remains in full effect until you learn to rhyme.Adam/Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid (Speaking): Oh No!Adam/Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid:He's got no rhyme and no sense of rhythm.And now it looks like the song never ends.Jake:If I can't learn to put words to music.It seems I'll be losing my ... pouches.Adam/Slips/Windsor/Lupe/Ingrid (Speaking): "Friends!"Jake (Speaking): Really? Are you sure it isn't "pouches"? "Friends" just doesn't sound right to me.