News/Blog

So, you know when the doctor asks if you are allergic to any medications? Well, I finally get to say "You betcha" in my best Tina Fey-impression-of-Sarah-Palin voice. Not sure I'm excited about this fact but it'll make my (very few) doctors visits more interesting. I am not a fan of doctors. More often than not they just recommend to take some pills and go away. My best example was when I was having repeated extreme acid reflux/ulcers, that were most likely stress and *cough* diet (or lack thereof or something...) related and they told 26 year old me to take a prescription heartburn medication each morning. I said "For how long?" They said "Probably everyday." I again said, "But for how long?" They said "From now on." So, for the next 25-50 years I am supposed to just keep taking drugs that I may or may not need? Needless to say, I was not very kind to them and the whole exchange ended with "Well, do whatever you want," as the doctor walked out the door. I've never taken a fucking heartburn pill since and never had that issue again... Turns out I was right the whole fucking time and cutting back on a few things (alcohol, cigarettes, stress, actually eating something beyond turkey sandwiches, tortilla chips and eggs and, some other things) and I've not had an issue since. I was twice hospitalized with this condition (didn't pay for either trip to the ER's plus the overnight stays. Tip to the young folks, find a private Catholic hospital as they have funding for poor people that come in and let them know you were raised Catholic and feel more comfortable in a hospital that acknowledges the Lord... Trust me, it works...) and I figured it out my damn self. Just like everything else in my life. Doctors rarely give enough fucks to dig deep and figure this shit out.

Which, brings me back to my newfound drug allergy. I have an inner-ear issue I've probably had since I was in my early twenties. I've had degenerative hearing loss in my right ear which started out very slight and now is quite noticeable when compared to my left ear. I used to barely hear a difference and think I was inventing it with my brain but not anymore. It's also coincided with a rise in tinnitus in that same ear. Again, I assumed this was due to many years of playing Rock N' Roll with very few years of wearing ear plugs. Dumb as fuck, I know, but whatever. It makes a difference to me and I can't sing for dick with ear plugs in. I know, I'm not fucking Jeff Buckley with them out (or with them in, bada-bing! Sex joke...) but it makes a difference, trust me.

This inner-ear issue was goddamn Fast and Furious style nitro-boosted after getting in two car accidents last year. Both times I was rear-ended while at a red light and both times dealt with whiplash and a concussion. Concussions are no joke and turns out if you've had one (or four or five) as a kid, they are way worse as an adult. The second one lasted basically three fucking months, and, was timed perfectly with the release of my new album "In My Youth, I'm Getting Old..." so I missed the release and was unable to make any music videos/release singles to promote the record. Not ideal when launching a record but God had other plans, I guess. After reading some more shit on inner-ear conditions like Meniere's disease, turns out whiplash is a common trigger or can aggravate this condition. It most certainly has. I've now seen three doctors for essentially the same issue (clogged ear, balance/vision issues) and one said it was because of an allergy, one said result of a cold and the last one said there's some fluid from an infection that will dry up and I'll be fine, even after I mentioned this is the third time I've dealt with a similar issue in the past year. She said there's a possibility it's Meniere's but it's highly unlikely since it's a rare condition. Well, it's probably a rare condition since I've seen a doctor three times for the same thing and they still haven't even really entertained the idea. They never diagnose it so it's rare. Just like Autism/Asperger's was until they finally started to figure out how to diagnose it. And, even now, I've met at least ten to fifteen people who have never been diagnosed who definitely live on the spectrum.

Oh yeah, my drug allergy. It's a bit ironic that the drug that is supposed to help with dizziness, nausea and vertigo fucks with my eyes (lost my near-sightedness, which is scary as fuck since I'm heavily near-sighted, like almost fucking blind unless things are within four inches of my face with my contacts out/glasses off) and stomach (making me slightly nauseous not hungry) and, just for kicks, gave me a rash on the front and back of my torso. Needless to say, it did not help... I'm currently looking at natural, legal (at least in the NW) alternatives that are supposed to help. So far, the information is promising...

Sadly, both Asperger's and Meniere's increase anxiety and depression. So, in other words, not cool bro. I'm still holding out hope that my ear issues are only temporary, though, based on the past six to twelve months, that is not the case. But, maybe, it could...

Anyways, how about some good news? Well, here you go: we live in a world where a band called Bon Jovi made a record called "New Jersey" which has one of the greatest side-As (side-B gets a little hit and miss...) in the history of the world. I mean, "LAY YOUR HANDS ON ME," "BAD MEDICINE" (fucking Sam Kinison, right?!) AND "BLOOD ON BLOOD" all on one side?? Come the fuck on. How are we supposed to compete with that? Now, while I don't compare women to a heroin habit, I'd argue side-A of "In My Youth, I'm Getting Old..." is pretty fucking good too. "LOOKIN' AT LUCKEY," "LET'S GO OUT TONIGHT" AND "DANCE THE NIGHT AWAY" are pretty rockin' tunes as well. OK, maybe not Bon Jovi level, but some of us don't do enough cocaine for that kind of shit...

Anywhosal, have a great night/day/afternoon, whatever the fuck it is for y'all...

(still not 100% from the vertigo/inner-ear issue so, once again, dictated but not read)

Sitting here, underneath the covers at the Hampton Inn in Kennewick, WA, I'm feeling... fine. After what was the second most harrowing driving experience in the past, I'm still recovering, though, and I'm not fully sure what is wrong other than it feels like I have another concussion but I don't, for once. It's definitely inner-ear related the doctor said, but exactly what it is she was unsure. I have my thoughts and she had hers. I believe it to be Meniere's Disease that is getting worse. She seemed to think the fluid behind the ear drum was a one-off, unrelated to my other symptoms as they weren't severe enough, I suppose. The gradual hearing loss in my right ear, the tinnitus, the fullness of ear that comes and goes and the random hearing/balance losses I've experienced the past five to seven years apparently are unrelated. I love doctors...But, anyways, I'll have to keep this one short as typing on the computer is certainly not helping.

OK. so, the second most harrowing drive this week started innocently enough last night. I was headed to the Tri-Cities area when I stopped for gas. I got out of the car to throw away some trash (you cannot, by law, pump your own gas in Oregon. Which is both convenient and inconvenient depending on your situation) when I suddenly felt a little dizzy/lightheaded. Thought it could be a blood sugar thing, so I ate a couple pieces of beef jerky, drank some water and was on my way. A little while later, I started to feel weird. Suddenly, it was really difficult to concentrate and it fell weird when I moved my head. I thought I was just extra tired from playing a bunch of basketball this weekend, but wasn't sure what was going on. I finally got to the hotel, and as soon as I stepped out, I swooned and nearly fell. I was full on dizzy/lightheaded and started vertigo symptoms. I quickly got up to my room and proceeded to try and stop the world from spinning for the next four hours, in addition to trying to fall asleep. I was nauseous and feeling like fucking shit. I was so glad it didn't get this bad while on the road. It was not great during the drive but the really bad stuff was saved til I got here, fortunately. Easily could have swooned behind the wheel and died, which only made it worse as my number one fear is dying behind the wheel as I miss a turn and drive off a cliff. Which, made my number one most harrowing drive this next one...

Worst drive of the past week: going to Klamath Falls from Medford. It's a drive I've done before but not in the dead of winter. I have a four-wheel drive Ford Escape and am pretty good at driving in the snow due to my Wisconsin upbringing, but we never had mountains and cliffs and unguarded corners leading towards hundred foot drop offs. Not a thing in WI. It was snowing pretty heavily along this extremely curvy and narrow road, which, by the way, is called "Dead Indian Rd." No fucking joke, look at this:

So, there I am, driving like 20 mph and trying not to panic on Dead Indian Rd (for those new to this, I am one-half Native American, so...) as my car slides all over the road and with my brakes are barely worth anything as I drive along. Coming downhill towards a couple unguarded corner/cliffs was not fun for anyone... Luckily, halfway across I got behind a plow and just followed him which helped a lot. Was slow as fuck, but a much easier path for me. So, yeah, snowy/icy conditions on a narrow road with some unguarded corners while driving over/through the mountains (again, my biggest fear in life is dying by driving off a cliff in an uncontrollable car...) was my least favorite thing to do in the recent past. But, I survived, only to have a horrific bout of vertigo not many days later. I wonder if the two are related as stress does make things worse, like my inner ear thing I've been dealing with until yesterday when it sort of cleared up then tried to murder me by giving me a touch of the dizzies whilst driving.

The one thing that is intriguing though, is the fact that I've heard medical marijuana can help with Meniere's disease in addition to Autism. I could regale you with stories of a girl and I who used to smoke to "feel normal" during some very tough times. Times when we had no appetite, took too many drugs and became rather reclusive/co-dependent. The weed made us hungry, social and reduced the massive stress we unnecessarily placed on ourselves to do something great and amazing with our lives. And, it fucking worked! So, we promptly stopped smoking and went back to other things and remained miserable during the limited time we spent together after those days of "feeling normal." But, I won't for now since I'm already starting to feel dizzy again just staring at the computer screen this long... So, bye for now. Hopefully, I can write more later this week.

Well, the STUPID ASS WINTER OLYMPICS are finally over... So, we have that going for us, which is nice. At least for weirdos like me, who enjoy PROFANITY-LACED, DRUNKEN TIRADES ABOUT WOMEN'S FIGURE SKATING. Yep, same link muthafuckers! I'm still livid about that but my girlfriend has decided she doesn't want to hear me say "Medvedeva" anymore. And, since she's much smarter than I am, and prettier, I'll oblige her because she's probably right that I'm borderline losing it over the Olympics I didn't even want to watch but was tricked into it when SHE, not me, started watching women's figure skating. And I still can't believe what Mirai Nagasu and her bullshit, millennial, lazy, scared, SHITTY COMMENTS AFTER SHE LOST. I don't give a fuck if SHE APOLOGIZED LATER. Doesn't mean a goddamn thing. I would have put her on a goddamn plane and sent her back if she didn't care enough to try. So disrespectful of her coaches, teammates, competitors who worked their fucking asses off so they could compete with someone who cares more about a warm shower than representing herself and her country. And don't even get me started on Tara Lipinski and her bullshit gold medal... Thanks for not getting me started... (sorry this is what my poor girlfriend has endured for like four days now...)

What I really wanted to mention was how hard it can be for a creative with Asperger's to get excited and motivated about doing shitty, boring music business things instead of trying to write my new favorite song or the best lyric or best hook or best guitar riff or best Moog sound or best anything other than doing bullshit-ass boring-as-fuck shit that "should be doing." One of the perks about having money (not a lot but more than enough to waste on music and still be able to drink decent bourbon and get to eat a fucking cheese plate with a bottle of wine when we so desire) is that you can pay people to do the boring shit for you. Only they never do it as good as you could have or as thoroughly or with as much passion or with as much tenacity or, fuck, I wish everyone cared about my shit as much as I do. I can't do it all. I tried. It nearly killed me...

Five years ago, I self-financed MY DEBUT ALBUM "Burn What You Can, Bury the Rest..." (click and scroll halfway down to listen or CLICK HERE AND FUCKING BUY THIS SHIT, you won't regret it). The band was fairly new and we hadn't yet discovered just how goddamn dysfunctional we were. Fuck, were we in for a shit-storm like I never expected...

Bad thing that happened during the making of my debut album: every other muthafucking thing that happened during the making of my debut album...

Some Highlights:

- Our producer/engineer (and us) got wrecked during the making of the final mixes on Woodford Reserve and good weed because of a bad breakup he'd had (our "discussion" over the use or non-use, I won, non-use it was, of auto-tune notwithstanding. Don't care if it's standard these days). To be fair, the producer/engineer of "Burn What You Can, Bury the Rest..." is the best music partner I've ever worked with. He made us and that record infinitely better than we (probably) were and even sang on "She Will Never Return to Me," in addition to playing organ on several other tunes. He also supported my ban of our drummer from the studio over a background vocal dispute.

- Hearing Brianne Kathleen sing for the first time, on my record... Figured we could just mix it low or cut a bunch out if she sucked but the opposite proved to be true.

- Hearing the "Just Like Jon Fickes" mix for the first time. Fun fact: I was so nervous about this song not living up to the sounds in my head that I had a panic attack, then self-sabotaged and drank all morning then had a second panic attack and passed out, missing the mixing session for this tune. When I finally showed up to the studio, it was already done and I just got to hear it for the first time out of my head (even when we played it live, it was different and more majestic in my head). It was wonderful and mystical and sounded more like my dream version than any other song I've recorded, maybe ever. I'm glad I wasn't there to screw up the mix...

Some Lowlights:

- Banning our drummer from the studio for his petulance over not singing a backup part Brianne CLEARLY sang 1000x better than him. Then, firing the drummer (and the guitar player quitting as a result, they're longtime friends) over disputes (fucking screaming matches) about the mixes, album title, the "Just Like Jon Fickes" song title, Brianne's vocals, the track order, what songs made the final cut and just about every other goddamn decision I made surrounding the album.

- Having to sell everything I owned apart from a free couch and a free bed, my guitars and my boots. I have a lifelong distaste for "Madmen" after season 3 because I had to sell all the DVD's before I even got to watch them... It's hard for millennials but I spent a year or two (who can remember? COCAINE IS A HELL OF A DRUG) without a computer or TV.

- Firing my bass player for trying to create the album art without me, trying to hijack and control the publicist and her message, and basically trying to kick ME out of BRADLEY WIK and the Charlatans since his coke-addled mind knew better than me about how we should display and promote MY album... Good times...

But, I did have the pleasure of playing "The Dark Lovely" for songwriter Jon Fickes at a show up in Seattle and getting to see him tear up a bit with pride and gratitude towards my love of his music. Karl's drums got stolen from his car parked outside the show (he wasn't even playing due to a mishap on a backflip during his Seahawks marching band gig). But, Jon's new album "Closer to a Ghost", under the band name A View of Earth From the Moon, is fantastic and I just got to see him on his tour ending show in Cottage Grove, OR last night. Yes, I'm still fucking tired from the 2+ hour drive there, and back, and the 3 or so hours of sleep I got (the 4+ bourbons/drinks didn't help either. 4 is Favre's number and so that's my number, 4 + or -, a gentleman never tells...). And, we did make good money on the ensuing tours, album sales, digital sales, etc. so I can't complain too much, until we decided to make another record...... (yes, that ellipsis had an ellipsis as that shit is far too fucked up and long to go into tonight) I thought the making of the first record was rough, but I had no idea. Seriously, no idea...

But, I learned a fuckload making "Burn What You Can, Bury the Rest..." and I wouldn't trade it for anything...

It's a goddamn travesty that Evgenia Medvedeva got screwed out of the gold medal. Right? Who's with me? Seriously, how did THIS GIRL NOT WIN?! Her component score was only 2.4 points better than Zagitova's component score? Fuck that. Her component should have been at least 5 points higher. Zagitova saved most of her jumps for the last 30 seconds, well, brilliant bitch, doesn't change a goddamn thing. Medvedeva nailed all her shit (I know, they both kinda biffed a triple in their sets) and it was a ridiculously more artistic skate. I get that the scorers love more technical skating but this is bullshit. Zagitova might have attempted a more technical triple-triple but does that negate the fact that Medvedeva's skate made me feel something? Medvedeva gave me a reason to love the Russian skaters. She made me believe in figure skating again, in the beauty of ice dancing.

I know, I know, I was against Russians in the Olympics to begin with since they were initially banned. I say, ban 'em or don't. But, I agree with the Olympic Committee allowing these girls in as it was my favorite/least favorite part of the Olympics. I tried to give the shitty fucking ass Winter Olympics could win me over, and they did with the ladies winning the Hockey, Vonn winning any medals, and US men's curling being a real thing. But if they are going to reward Zagitova's run over Medvedeva's then fuck the winter olympics and I'll go back to only caring about the summer games (Michael Phelps or no).

Not sure how else to say this but since Medvedeva didn't win, I'm back out on the stupid winter Olympics. Sure, curling is fun and so is the biathalon (a sport the US should win every year, skiing and shooting, come the fuck on) but figure skating is what the world tunes in for. And, the US is fucking shit right now. Nagasu even said it was her audition for "Dancing with the Stars." That's goddamn a disgrace.

Regardless, Medvedeva should have won the gold and I'll never get over that. She got screwed on the component score vs Zagitova. Yes, Zagitova did win the technical score but Medvedeva was clearly the better skater, especially from an artistic level. It wasn't particularly close even though somehow the judges ruled them approx. 2 points apart in that way. Goddamnit, what a fucking travesty. Sorry, I'm drunk and I'm pissed Medvedeva didn't win. Such bullshit. If you want skaters to game the system than brilliant, fuck you. If you want the best skater to win, than you fuck you, you fucked up, assholes... You picked the wrong girl for gold...

Fuck. I'm sorry. Goddamn two weeks in a row... What an asshole. Well, yeah and you knew that coming in here. So, it's kind of your own fault. I was doing so well but it's hard to write on a plane when you're tired as fuck and as soon as they announce there is no wi-fi you use that as an excuse to just fall asleep. Which, I realize now doesn't make any sense but that's the beauty of Asperger's: when something doesn't go according to plan it ruins everything, and thusly, I missed a week. Side note though, it's weird that wi-fi on plane in only an invention of the past few years but now I was pissed when I didn't have it because it (not really) screwed up my writing of a blog then watching "CHIPS" as I flew through the skies like our ancestors could only dream of. Jokes on the them, I watched "CHIPS" on my flight home, muthafuckers! It wasn't worth it... I goddamn love Dax Shepard, especially in "Employee of the Month." I know, fucking Dane Cook, right? But, that movie does ring true for anyone who ever worked big box retail, myself included. I didn't have Andy Dick for spot comic relief but we did alright in the humor department. Always thought that would be a great comedy show until I saw "Superstore." But, I guess that just means that I need to kick my story into high gear. Maybe it's time to fuck off this music thing and get to writing... Maybe not yet. But soon, maybe. But, probably not. But, Netflix is buying up fucking everything. But, I'm still too young for that. Or am I?

Anyways, I had to re-up(load) my video to youtube so I'd appreciate it if you CLICK ON THIS OR THE BELOW LINK to watch and make sure this comes up before the old/taken down version on google.

Editor's note: Since I failed in my task of writing this every Monday, this next paragraph is old. Thoughts from the Super Bowl...

Congratulations to THE "FINE" PEOPLE OF PHILADELPHIA on their Super Bowl win. Fucking Nick Foles... That muthafucker just made himself a lot of money, Joe Flacco-style. All it takes is one great playoff run and BOOM some team will regret paying you for years to come... But, he goddamn earned it. I honestly thought the Patriots would win until their was :00 left on the clock. I thought Doug Pederson made some terrific, and ballsy, calls during the game (going for it on fourth down multiple times, including on the one-yard line) and also made some horrific decisions I was convinced would come back to bite him in the ass (the two failed two-point conversion attempts). I was so pissed Collinworth and Michaels weren't making a bigger deal out of the the lost two points which allowed the Patriots to have a chance at the end to tie it with a TD and a two-point conversion, just like last year. I have no clue why they were points-chasing and fell into the two-point death spiral which was completely unnecessary with so much time left in the game. I know Pederson loves to be aggressive and it, somehow, didn't come back to bite them in the ass but I really thought it would. Either way, lackluster performance by both defenses and Justin Timberlake. JT did... fine. It was good and he had a cool stage setup but without bringing Janet Jackson back out which would have been his "holy shit" moment, the whole performance was good but not memorable. He had a chance to go down in history by bringing Janet back to reference the moment that changed live broadcast TV forever and he played it safe. Congrats on being the performance I'll forget in the near future just like... well, all the performances in recent history not including BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN CROTCH SLIDING AND SLAMMING HIS DICK INTO AMERICA IN HD and, I don't know, maybe U2's performance way the fuck back in 2002. Get it together NFL and Pepsi and get some good shit for us again... Boo...

OK, old shit over.

Holy shit, "The End of the Fucking World." That's it. What a show. Show recommended and show loved. Touche Netflix. You've done it again.

It contains some of the most fucked up moments apart from THESE ON BOJACK when BoJack confronts a friend who's dying and almost sleeps with the underage daughter of a former crush. Man, is there anything on TV better than BoJack? The answer is no. BoJack is the greatest show since Arrested Development and we'd probably be saying "since Seinfeld" if not for BUSTY'S "HEY HERMANO." Sure, THIS RICK AND MORTY MUMFORD AND SONS JOKE COMES CLOSE but doesn't quite reach the heights (or depths) of Mr. Horseman. So it goes...

If you couldn't tell, it's been a fucked up week. Things have been good but that doesn't really mean much to someone suffering from Asperger's and depression who probably drinks too much and LOVES TINY RICK AND ALSO LISTENS TO TOO MUCH ELLIOTT SMITH. Bonus points for Rick and Morty. I may be "getting too old for this ship" but I still enjoy a solid funny/depressing reference, especially one referencing suicide. Whoa, that shit's dark. Sorry, y'all. But, wait til you GET INTO THIS INTERVIEW WHICH I'VE BECOME OBSESSED WITH. It's been eye-opening and comforting. The openness during this interview is mind-blowing. Music is not for the well-adjusted...

I apologize for not being present during these past couple weeks, but it's been harder for me than you, so fuck off. Anyhow, I'm hungry and tired... I know after two weeks you were looking for something grandiose and exciting but this is what you get. So, goodnight, y'all...

My favorite thing this week is WATCHING THIS (from :19-:24). I know, I know, late to the party. I've dabbled in Rick and Morty over the years but never had the time or energy or want or really even cared enough to start another fucking TV show. Fucking Netflix and shit, there's too goddamn much to catch up on. But, I relented, and the only winner here is me. Of course I love it. I always knew I would. Luckily, if you don't care about sleep you can plow through the 30 episodes goddamn quick, like in a week (yes, I do other shit during the day and only really watch TV between midnight and 3am. Healthy, right? Probably explains my love for goddamn infomericals and my obsession with the clinically insane Cathy Mitchell and her RED COPPER 5 MINUTE CHEF. Or, some of my all-time favorites in THE MAGIC BULLET, the long form infomercial which I've watched on repeat for hours, literally, and I mean "literally" in the literal sense, not the hipster "literally" type of way, and the granddaddy of them all, the 28 minute masterpiece, THE RONCO ROTISSERIE. Seriously, 28 minutes?! I know I've wasted at least 20 hours of my life as I've seen this shit at least 40 or 50 times. Sad... Well, it would be if I hadn't wasted an equal amount of time WATCHING THIS and actually ended up getting a power pressure cooker; though not the one in the infomercial. It was Christmas gift and it is truly amazing. The tenderest chicken and pork I've ever eaten has come out of this thing, in a fraction of the time it would take in a crockpot. It's fucking so soft it's goddamn falling apart as you're pulling it out of the pressure cooker. And if you throw in some onions and peppers and tomatillos, and OH MY GOD. Wait, am I selling pressure cookers or writing a blog? Seriously, what should I be doing right now? Apparently, after a few bourbons I can't tell the difference. Is there a difference? What am I talking about? Jesus...).

It's weird but this past week has been good. No Asperger's meltdowns. No random obsessions to sidetrack me (apart from catching up on Rick and Morty, but that is just smart. Just fucking smart). And, no setbacks in my musical career like the ones which have basically defined the last two years of my life. It's good. Like really fucking good. It was so good, in fact, that I accidentally watched "Get Him to the Greek," one of my all-time favorite movies, and immediately was sad. I used to be Aldous. I still am sometimes. It's not always fun (in fact, it's mostly depressing) but it was/sometimes is so fucking exciting. I STILL SAY THIS ALL THE FUCKING TIME (though I usually substitute "Bradley Wik" for "Aldous Snow"). It's also weird but I cannot, abso-fucking-lutely cannot do accents (except for my New York accent, but that was hard-earned in the years I spent there) but I can mimic lines, like a parrot with Asperger's. I once even learned a shitload of lines from the movie so I could mimic his British accent enough to convince an entire group of strangers at a bar that I was from England, only to reveal that I'm not and they must be fucking idiots to not know. It went over so well. I almost got punched in the face by a girl who was ready to to go home with me only seconds earlier (she swung and I was not too drunk to dodge). It was a blast. Good times... I mean, how many times have we all DONE INTERVIEWS LIKE THIS... If you answered never, I would concur as I've not been on the Today Show either. But, the content rings true, in a completely not true kind of way, if that makes sense. Hopefully, it doesn't but perhaps you understand the deeper inner turmoil that haunts you daily and tries, unsuccessfully, yet forcefully, to undermine your purest intentions and your dreams and your relationships and your "normal" life as you search endlessly for a respite, however momentary, from the damage it's already inflicted which is growing inward and spreading with each passing hour as you dwell deeper and harder on your own insecurities and faults... Wait, that last one sounded sexual and was quite funny. "Deeper and harder" made me giggle. At last, a benefit of being an immature man. Take that world. "WHO'S RETARDED NOW?"

It's nice being at home while writing this for once and not in some crappy to mediocre hotel room. So nice, in fact (which I've said too many times tonight), that I'm going to call it a night earlier than normal (read: midnight) and sleep in my own fucking bed as long as I possibly can. Sorry for the short post, but fuck it, I don't care. Love all y'all. Goodnight muthafuckers!

Sports and shit...

I almost feel bad for Vikings fans... Almost. I get it though. I really do. Team of Destiny type feel, incredible regular season run, miracle throw and catch in the Divisional round (though ours was more a result of amazing talent then random brain fart but whatever) and... complete meltdown in the NFC Championship. Yep, welcome to the Packers' fans world. That was our experience last year and now you get to root for the Patriots just as I did last year, which isn't a bad place to be in considering Tom Brady is the cheat code for the NFL. It's like Brady figured out (and has become) what was the DUMBEST/LAMEST CHEAT CODE EVER IN JOHN ELWAY'S QUARTERBACK ON NES. Do the Eagles stand a chance? Of course they do. But, is it reasonable to expect that this game will eventually come down to Brady vs. that vaunted Eagles defense, just as it did in the Patriots' game against the Jaguars. And, similarly, just as he did against the vaunted Seahawks' defense and the Falcons' defense in Super Bowls past (not to mention the 51 other 4th quarter comeback wins, including this past weekend), Tom will be ready to tear them a new asshole come crunchtime. So, Vikings fans, rest assured that the Eagles will get theirs. I'm sure the first half will be promising for Foles and the Eagles and it'll appear that they have a great chance at taking home their first Lombardi, but that is utterly meaningless when MR. TECMO SUPER BOWL HIMSELF COULDN'T COMPETE WITH TOM BRADY...

Now, I didn't get to watch either of the games this weekend since I was in Spokane, WA for a show (many thanks to the Spokane DoubleTree for upgrading me to the Presidential Suite... There's nothing quite like a hotel room with multiple bathrooms and more chairs than you can fart in...) and was traveling back during the games. I have to say I was surprised by the Vikings/Eagles outcome a little, but not much. My lady did announce, quite authoritatively, that the Jaguars had improbably defeated the Patriots 20-10, to which I replied "Are you sure? Is there no time left?" knowing that even 10 seconds is enough for Mr. Brady to score 2 touchdowns if he wanted to. I spent the last five hours of the trip thinking "Blake Bortles is a Super Bowl quarterback... Yay... Trent Dilfer would be proud..." Luckily, it wasn't so...

Life, Music and shit...

This week I got to see the first cut of my music video for "Lookin' at Luckey." As you'll recall (because you read all of these blog posts/updates religiously, right? RIGHT?!?!), we shot a music video a few weeks back. If you don't remember or aren't all up on this bitch, READ THIS SHIT AND GET CAUGHT UP ASSHOLES! Anyways, the cut was AMAZING! The director was horribly ill (probably because he works way too fucking hard) and was out for a couple weeks, so this was my first glimpse. I was BLOWN AWAY GEORGE, BLLLOOOOWWNN AWAY. Kevin, the director, has such an incredible eye for this shit. He's an unbelievable talent and I'm still grateful that we got to work with him. I simply cannot wait to show you guys and gals this thing he's created (and I helped! Bonus points for anyone who gets that commercial reference. Sometimes I feel old. HE LIKES IT, HEY MIKEY). It could be the thing I'm most proud of being a part of in my career. Luckily, very little acting was require of me. Singing along and pretending to play my own fucking song is about the extent of my acting skills. Oh, and looking fucking badass and sexy in my leather jacket, jeans and boots... I'M JUST A LONELY LONER, ON A LONELY ROAD...

Since it was a sadder week, here are the top five songs from Bradley's week (since I know you're all dying to know. Well, I guess you might be if you're actually reading this fucker. And, if you're reading this, Hi Mom!):

I've been obsessed with trying to learn the lyrics as I played the fuck out of the version he released before the record when he was being weird and leaking his own songs but sometimes they were different versions for some fucking reason with different lyrics or were songs that weren't on the record and it was weird but that's a fucking run-on sentence if there ever was one. But, he released the alternate version in the middle of my insanity, the middle of my crazy period filled with anything and everything terrible and I can't count the nights I survived because of it's majestic beauty. Kanye is simply on a different level. I 100% truly believe he truly is the greatest hip-hop artist ever. He somehow usurped A Tribe Called Quest for me. I mean, fuck, he is the man who once said "Have you ever had sex with a pharaoh? Put the pussy in a sarcophagus." Classic.

Speaking of Spokane, WA, "It's got bums when it's cold like any other place..." Just a beautiful song by a man who truly understands us humans. Not many do, unfortunately. Or, fortunately, for them. I think I'm talking specifically about me and not most of humanity. Maybe it's an Asperger's thing. I only know me and what makes me "me." Who knows...

Yes, that's me singing this ridiculously old folk song with Jon Fickes and playing one half of the dual harmonica solo. Yes, there was a time in our lives when we thought a dual harmonica solo was a good idea... New York City is a hell of a drug...

Yes, while in Spokane I spent my last couple hours (ridiculously drunk, by the way, as expected) at a piano bar yearning for this song. The guys didn't have a system that made sense to me so I didn't request this song as I normally would. They never play it anyways at piano bars... I need a new piano bar song... But, this always takes me back to a time when Chevy Chase was one of the funniest people on the planet. I miss it. I love "Three Amigos" like it's nobody's business. I mean, Jesus fuck, THIS HAPPENED. I still watch my fucking old DVD copy of that movie constantly. It isn't even in widescreen or fullscreen, it's only fills up part of my TV and is in the old-style cardboard DVD case. It isn't as old as my "Goodfellas" DVD which I have to flip over in the middle of the movie, but it's probably the second or third DVD I bought.

I could listen to "Al" all day, every day and never tire of it. Plus, it's probably the greatest music video ever created. NERD ALERT: this was my favorite song to play in Pep Band. Turns out when you tear your achilles and you can't play football and basketball (and baseball, but there's no baseball pep band) but you love music and still want to be around sports (and the cheerleaders) you might play in the pep band and learn songs like this. Goddamn, run-on sentence much after five Woodford's?

No time to proofread this shit, so it is as such. Read at your own risk, or don't, but if you're reading this than you've fucking read the whole thing anyways... So, I win... Til next time...

This has been a relatively calm week for ol' Bradley, which was nice. I don't get many of those. I'm happy to report nothing extraordinary happened in the past seven days, which in itself is extraordinary, so I guess I fucking lied, sort of, anyways. My shins are fucking killing me since I suffer from shin splints and occasionally try to be "healthy" and play basketball (I gave up on running since it was boring as shit and hurt my shins even more) for an hour or so a day. But, after goddamn two or three days, I'm in immense pain for the rest of the week. It's really fun trying to work out... Good thing I look good without doing it...

Obviously, I'm sure most of you are like get to the fucking point and tell us...

What are your favorite Charlize Theron movies?

Well, good question, my friends. As an avid watcher of Charlize, I have to break that down further. I cannot, and, frankly, will not judge them all as one entity. I also cannot say I've seen all her work. But she is a woman of many talents who went absurdly quickly from modeling to acting, starting as an uncredited extra in "Children of the Corn III" and within a year or so was in "2 Days in the Valley." Quite a jump. But, she is crazy talented so let's get into it...

Kickass Charlize:

- "Atomic Blonde"

Runner Up: "Mad Max: Fury Road"

I remember making dinner, sitting down on my shitty couch and firing up "Fury Road." The movie goes straight to 11 (though I feel nowadays many people who use that phrase aren't aware of it's origins anymore... Sad). I think I took two bites of food before realizing I should put it away til after the movie or it would be wasted. I was captivated in a way very few movies are capable of.

BUT "Atomic Blonde" is downright fucking amazing. This move kicks ass in a way that is rarely achieved. This is up there with movies like "The Protector," "John Wick" and "HARD TO KILL." OK, that last one might be a stretch but I fucking love it. Mason Storm is going to be my first child's name, boy or girl. Steven Seagal is that fucking badass. Anyway, I don't care about the complaints about the ridiculous plot of "Atomic Blonde." It doesn't matter one lick. All I want is badass-ness and people getting their shit kicked in, LIKE THIS or LIKE THIS.

Serious Charlize:

- "The Fate of the Furious"

Runners Up: "The Devil's Advocate" and "That Thing You Do!"

I know. It seems absurd to rank a "Fast & Furious" movie ahead of her Oscar-winning role, but c'mon. I know I will, scratch that, I have already have seen "Fate of the Furious" more times than I'll ever watch "Monster." I get that they're two totally different films but this is my list muthafuckers. "The Devil's Advocate" almost convinced me that Keanu was a legitimate dramatic actor. Almost... Pacino and Theron carry this movie though it is strange that Keanu has already been sorta mentioned twice on this list...

Also, who remembered that Charlize was in "That Thing You Do!" besides me? Bonus points for your memory and her portrayal as the bitchy, yet incredibly sexy, girlfriend. JUST WATCH THIS. Yeah, that was fun.

Sexy Charlize:

- "2 Days in the Valley"

Runner Up: every other Charlize Theron movie (she can't not be sexy, even in "Monster" somehow)

Ummm. Like I said, within one of year of being an uncredited extra in "Children of the Corn III," here she is in "2 Days in the Valley." Remarkable. I'll never forget the first time I watched this movie. I was 12 and at my buddies house. His dad was one of those guys that loved TV's and surround sound setups. So, with this being around the turn of the millennium, he had an enormous rear-projection screen type TV, approximately 60" if I remember correctly, with 8.1 surround sound. They had a huge wrap-around couch that was leather and you just fucking sunk into. His dad loved to host people so he could show off his movie collection, TV and sound system. He bought this movie having only seen it once and fired it up for my buddy and his three 12 year old friends. We dimmed the lights, sank into that huge couch with a giant bowl of popcorn, root beers at our side, with his affable golden retriever roaming between us trying to find the perfect spot on the couch and fired up "2 Days." Come to find out his dad had completely forgotten about the R-rated sex scenes that we were about to watch on that 60" screen in surround sound. Needless to say, there was a mad dash for the fast-forward button and some very happy pre-teens...

And lastly, my favorite, Funny Charlize:

- "Arrested Development"

Runner Up: "A Million Ways to Die in the West"

OK, "Arrested Development isn't a movie but I guarantee you I quote her as Rita more than anything else. 100%. It's not really even that close. She's absolutely brilliant as a comedic actor and I wish she did more comedy. But, to each his own. I could watch her eat plastic fruit, show Michael her tiny teddy and be excited about getting "married, married, married" all day. If I could choose one role to watch her in for the rest of my life, I would unflinchingly choose Rita. Now, "Arrested Development" season 4 was shit (hopefully 5 is better) so I don't know about the future but we'll always have "Bumpaddle" magazine...

Anywho, that's what I got this week. Be back soon to divulge... more personal information like I always do. Peace!

I'm still sick but wine and metal (music) will fix me, right?

As I mentioned yesterday, I am sick. Turns out one day may not be enough to get back to normal. I thought it was, but here we are. I still feel like shit but wine helps; at least, it helps me not care so much. Also, as I mentioned yesterday, insomnia is a bitch. Not sure if any of you have ever experienced insomnia but it's not fun. Yes, as shown in "Fight Club," I do watch infomercials and memorize them (hard to beat the Ronco, but the drunk Irishmen/Magic Bullet is fun, as is the insane, possibly murderous, making no claims but just saying, Copper Flipwich bitch; who, if you told me murdered everyone on the set after those commercials, I would say "Yep, OK") and even come to like them. I do own a power pressure cooker. Except that thing is fucking awesome and makes the best chicken or pork taco meat you can imagine. The meat comes out, after only 15-20 minutes, like it was cooked in a crock-pot all day, fucking tender and juicy and full of whatever seasoning or flavor you added to it (usually tomatillo and cayenne or some variation, in my case). It shreds easily and is oh-so-fucking delicious. In 20 minutes you can make a meal and leftovers for the next couple days. It's brilliant. Wait, tacos? That's not why we're here. Shit, why are we here?

Oh, yeah, Asperger's and sleep, or more accurately, lack of sleep. It's an issue I've dealt with since High School, and probably before though I didn't know it. I used to play sports year-round, which helped. Every day there were hours and hours devoted to making myself tired, physically and mentally. After I broke my achilles, that changed. A lot of things changed, but I do remember specifically my late nights starting. Whether that be through video games (I used to be a fairly avid gamer, Dreamcast muthafuckers! Oh, and way too much Counter Strike), reading, playing guitar, etc., I had a hard time sleeping. Then I found the joys of music. I'd always been a lover of music but then I found a new reason to love it: sleep. I, like many, found that listening to music that I knew and loved, not music that I hadn't heard or would force me to stay awake and listen, would help me fall asleep. CD players had sleep timers or the CD would just fucking end. Though, I was a fucking badass and had my Aiwa 3-CD stereo so I had to set a sleep timer and be careful was what in the next spot after my desired listen. No Soulfly in slot 2 if you catch my drift. THIS DOESN'T REALLY HELP YOU SLEEP. Fred Durst was a thing? Remember? Please don't... COAL CHAMBER WAS ONE THAT ACTUALLY HELPED ME SLEEP FOR SOME REASON... Wait, are these the same songs? They sound the same. Wait, all that nu-metal, scream-alot (not "o"), kinda sounded the same... Except Godsmack, right? WAIT, THIS IS THE SAME TOO. Just kidding, that was definitely more on the Metallica spectrum. Even to the "meeeeeuuhhh, yeah" accents. It's borderline shameful how many times I had sex to that eponymous Godsmack record... Borderline, I said. It was also borderline admirable. Turns out I had a different type of girl I was attracted to back in the day. I'll never forget the early arguments with one girlfriend about the music we would play while we fucked so as not to make it too fucking obvious to her roommate that we were boning. She always knew so I don't know exactly why we thought that helped that much, but we were young. In fact, she used to fuck with us about it. We were so dumb. But, back to the point, it is so goddamn ridiculous to think back on what music we would play during sex. She'd put in Godsmack, Korn, Disturbed, and I'd put in Nick Drake, Neil Young, Tupac, Modest Mouse, Radiohead, Jay-Z, Ryan Adams but we could both agree on System of a Down, Portishead, Iron & Wine or Led Zeppelin.

(Editors note: Springsteen and Dylan are FAR too distracting to fuck to. Just a note for the young ones out there. It's too easy to start listening to the records and forget about "doing" what you're supposed to be "doing." Maybe it's just me, but just saying. I guess if you're trying to find ways to go longer they might be appropriate, but for me it changed the mood)

I know, a bit of weird "agreed upon" list but that's what it was. Wait, I was talking about insomnia not sex...

It's difficult because everyone just says "why don't you just go to bed?" Laying around not sleeping and just dwelling on all the things that make you stressed, sad, depressed, things that you need to do, things you should've done but haven't, why your life is a waste and everything you've failed at doesn't exactly help you drift off into slumberland, trust me. Reading only makes me less tired. I suppose I could read more boring books which would help me desire sleep, but who wants to do that? Television helps but sleeping on the couch (which I did for three years due to some other issues) isn't ideal either. No, music is the best thing for me. Unfortunately, my girlfriend cannot abide me listening to music in bed. It keeps her up. So, I stay up instead. Some nights drinking and watching "IT Crowd" reruns (well, I guess they're not reruns anymore. Fuck, what do you call old shows you've seen before on Netflix? Rewatches?) on Netflix until I pass out is enough to make me tired when I get to bed. Some nights it isn't. Some nights listening to records, and drinking, until my head hits my desk is enough. Some nights it isn't. Some nights writing blogs, and drinking, until I can't form coherent sentences is enough. But a good chunk of the nights, nothing helps and I get to stay up until, well I may not sleep more than a half hour here or there. It's not fun and it always comes in waves. It's never one night, which you could get past with a nap the next day. It's always weeks or months at a time.

The thing that sucks about Asperger's is that routines are everything, both positive or negative, and sleep is no exception. Once you can't sleep, you can't sleep, and there is nothing you can do about it. It's awful. That's where I am now. The beds at the Hampton Inn in Medford, OR aren't terrible by any means but I'm sure I'll barely enjoy them. I'll probably just lay awake and LISTEN TO THIS OVER AND OVER THINKING OF A DIFFERENT TIME... A time when getting an hour or two of sleep didn't matter. Being 18 was good for something, I suppose...

I wish I had an answer. I really wish I do. Maybe if someday I could build a pattern and routine of sleeping like a normal person, then things could get better. For now, I'll listen to MARILYN MANSON'S VERSION OF WILLY WONKA CRAZY ASS FUCKING SONG... Obviously, I'm feeling like I'm 13-18 again tonight but apparently only the metal, shitty 90's side of me. Saw a Marilyn Manson tribute band before the greatest AC/DC tribute band on the planet (Helles Belles) and I have to admit I knew most of the tunes. Took me back to a younger time in my life when (speaking of Willy Wonka and Marilyn Manson) "THEY FAIL TO SEE THE ANGUISH IN MY EYES" was a line that just fucking hit me. Shit, I guess that's still a great fucking line. Marilyn Manson was always better than people gave him credit for. And growing up in Wisconsin I heard a lot of "he's such a faggot" type comments, which forced me to explain things to people that they never would even entertain to hear. I learned a lot back then. I'm not surprised Wisconsin went Trump in the last election. I remember sitting in the Mazatlan Mexican Restaurant in Everett, WA in November 2016 on election day thinking that if this comes down to Wisconsin, we're fucked. Sure enough it was one of the deciding states. My bartender and waitress, both Mexican, were nearly in tears. I was aghast but I didn't know what to say to them. They spoke of their families and their fear for them here in America. It was so sad to hear. I thought of where I grew up and was angry and confused and wanted to do something, but I couldn't. It was done and I knew why. I knew it would happen. Now, I'm just rambling. Probably a side-effect of the wine and habitual lack of sleep. So, I'm signing off again. Not sure this helped anyone but myself but I hope someone feels less strange when reading this at 2:45 IN THE MORNING. I can't help you but you're not alone...

(written drowsily but not read or edited. Sorry, it's fucking late and I have to not sleep. I know, I won't be sleeping so I should be doing something worthwhile but that's not how it works, assholes)

Ummm... Football without the Packers and insomnia are fun... Wait, did I say "fun?" I meant detrimental to your (my) health...

I'm not sure where to start since the Packers' season is over. It's so strange to watch football games without having a rooting interest in any of it. Normally, I'm trying to see who the Packers may face and how they match up against them, but now I just don't care. Instead, I tried to amuse myself by wondering what it's like to be the fan bases of these respective teams. I thought of the heartbreak of the Chiefs fans after probably the most "Andy Reid" playoff game ever. The Titans fans short-lived joy with their miserably mediocre team who is busy getting ready to be annihilated next week. The delusional Rams fans who thought Goff and the young Rams could win themselves a playoff game. I would've bet my life (well, maybe just large sums of money) against the Rams and Jared Goff. I watched Goff since the Aaron Rodgers comparisons started 3-4 years ago and have never been impressed. Sure, I've seen him make NFL-type throws (far hash to the opposite sideline, looking the safety off just enough to get the deep post open and releasing an accurate dart just before taking a hit, etc.) but it has mostly been relatively "meh" when watching him play. I think his coach has done an amazing job getting him into great looks but I feel like he's a less-talented Matt Ryan. You know, the guy who rode the same situation last year to an undeserved MVP award. No doubt Matt Ryan can make "all the throws" as they say, but I rarely feel like he is the reason the team wins games. If anything, he actively tried to lose them games this year but the team was good enough to overcome his multiple-interception disasters in Detroit and at home vs. the Saints. So, that's why I wish I was a gambler so I could bet on Matt Ryan vs. Goff/less-talented Matt Ryan. But, I am not, so I made $0 this weekend...

Bills vs. Jaguars went exactly how I envisioned it; except, Blake Bortles was even worse than I could have imagined having only watched one Jaguars game all season. The Micah Hyde concussion may have swung that game unfortunately (in addition to the Tyrod Taylor concussion, though I believe Hyde's to be more detrimental to the Bills)...

Saints vs. Panthers was more interesting than I had hoped and Cam actually had a pretty damn good game but it's unfortunate that we cannot have a Panthers prime-time game with a Cam concussion controversy... Concussions, concussions, concussions... Not a good look especially after the NFL was going to take a stronger stand just a few weeks ago. Nice stronger stand. No penalties on the concussion hits, no players ejected, a player not removed properly after falling to a knee. Nice...

The College National Championship just ended a bit ago, and while it was more entertaining than I had hoped, I never felt like Georgia had a chance, even after the missed field goal to end regulation.

But I'll get more into all this tomorrow. Sorry, I'm sick and feel like absolute shit. Probably doesn't help that I've been battling insomnia for the past few weeks either but so it goes...

(Dictated but not read. Well, typed drowsily and not edited or checked for errors.)

Thank god this season is over... Also, here's the music I promised on my Periscope's. Hope you like harmonica...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY UPDATE:

Well, another week, another disappointment. I didn't expect the result to be much different considering we were fielding what was essentially a preseason lineup against a borderline playoff team. And considering the Lions just let go of Jim Caldwell, they felt they were, at least, a playoff team. There are a number of things that I'm happy about though:

#1-#98 - Aaron Rodgers will be back next year. As much as this season sucked and it seemed like our roster was not a Super Bowl-caliber roster, all of that would've been different if we were living in Mr. Rodgers Neighborhood. It's hard to think of but a long, long time ago, I can still remember when... the Packers were 4-1 and prohibitive Super Bowl favorites via Vegas and Jordy Nelson led the league in TD receptions (or was tied for the lead, I can't remember). Those were certainly different times...

#99 - Davante Adams is coming back. He deserved every penny of his new contract, especially considering the not one, but two incredibly cheap and nasty hits he took this season that led to concussions. Again, I've been through concussions recently and they were not fun and I most certainly did not get over them in a week's time like Mr. Adams, so I most certainly hate that this happened; to him and me. FOR CHRIST'S SAKE, I MISSED MY FUCKING ALBUM RELEASE (and the subsequent month or two, can't remember, for some fucking reason...) DUE TO A CONCUSSION. So, yeah, I fucking hate concussions. Stop running into me from behind at red lights assholes. Please...

#100 - Corey Linsley is coming back. He still has one of the most memorable blocks I've ever seen. Remember a couple years back when we were playing the Bears and Aaron Rodgers was getting tackled and threw the ball across his body, sidearmed, as the guy had his arm as part of the sack, and it went all the way across the fucking field and, somehow, directly to Davante Adams for a touchdown? It was one of the most ridiculous throws in Rodgers' career and it didn't count because of a bullshit penalty against Linsley. Linsley is so fucking strong he threw his guy to the ground, which, for some reason, they called as a holding penalty. I'm still not sure what they were thinking but fuck them, I still remember the TD as such. I've seen Linsley get flagged for being "too strong" and knocking people over at least four times that I can recall. Glad to have him back. Rodgers had something like five different centers in his first six seasons, so it's nice to have someone there for more than a year...

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

I promised some music on here a few weeks ago (after the Jake Becker-themed Periscope concert) but was too dumb to figure out how. Well, by George, I've done it! And, as promised during my recent folk music-themed Periscope concert (every other Friday, next up 1/12/2018), here are the folk songs I played, fucked up a little (since I haven't played them in 8-9 years) but had fun reliving last Friday on, yes, you guessed it, my Periscope concert series (search "bradley wik" on the periscope app. It'll be the one with my fucking face on it). They take a second to load I've found, but stick with it, it's worth it...

FOLK SONGS:

"Mona Lisa's Blues":

"My Dearest Emily":

JAKE BECKER SONG'S THAT I STOLE (we used to be a band called Tyger that Sleeps):

"Lookin' at Luckey" comes alive!

(editors note: this was supposed to go up Tuesday. Not sure why it didn't. Fucking computers and internet things...)

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY UPDATE:

Unfortunately, I was unable to watch a single second of the Packers game as I was busy doing this:

"What does making funny faces in bars have to do with not watching the Packers?" you may ask. And you'd be right, if I wasn't being filmed doing it. Because then it's cool and it's called a music video...

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

I was shooting a music video for "Lookin' at Luckey" this past weekend which was a fucking blast. I got to work with some amazing people including the absurdly brilliant writer/director, KEVIN PIETILA, and the beyond beautiful and wonderfully-talented lead actress, SONORA MINDWERL. And that's not including my other ridiculously awesome friends SARA MORRIS, BRIANNE KATHLEEN and A VIEW OF EARTH FROM THE MOON'S VERY OWN (JUST LIKE) JON FICKES. It was truly a blessing to have so much artistic energy in the room(s) when making this fucker. I had such a fun time despite learning that I am not quite as brilliant an actor as I assumed I once was. That honor goes to Sonora and Jon Fickes, who were wonderful when "action" was called. Give me a guitar, mic and a crowd and I'm in my element. Give me words to say and a camera in my face and... not my element so much. Although, I used to do a fantastic Jack Black/Tenacious D-type impression given the right audience. I passed my high school speech class with a Bob Marley song ("Redemption Song") and Jack Black inspired improvised speech/performance. I was tasked with performing this improvised speech in front of my whole graduating class later on, which I guess means it was pretty good. So, I have that going for me, which is nice...

We did a lot of amazing things during the video but perhaps my favorite was this:

What a beautiful car that I am so undeserving to even sit in... This Thunderbird was amazing. It's lucky you can't see below the waist on these shots. Boners upon boners...

Anyways, more updates for you soon... So tired... Who knew video shoots were more draining than recording sessions?

Even a Packers win can't cure Asperger's... I know, right?

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY UPDATE:

Well, folks, we did it! We gave Aaron Rodgers a reason to come back. Was it a great reason? No, it was the bare fucking minimum needed. But, who gives a shit? HE'S COMING BACK! Sure, the loss to the Ravens would have really helped our cause; as would have an unlikely win over the Steelers, who seem like they are mostly concerned with getting their kicker as many "practice" game-winning kicks as possible before the playoffs to get him prepared for the Jaguars (yes, it's still fucking weird as fuck to think of them as legitimate contenders) and/or the Patriots. But, nevertheless, here were are. Not out completely, but goddamnit, the one time I need the Saints and Vikings to come through... I think they both lost knowing they couldn't beat a pissed off Aaron Rodgers in the playoffs so their best bet was to keep the Packers out of the playoffs altogether. The Falcons seriously tried to give the Saints that game and the Saints acted like winning was somehow related to the myriad of sexual harassment/assault stories coming out recently and they wanted nothing to do with it, not even be in the same room or building as it. And the Vikings are, well, the slightly above average team (who is still legitimately the third best team in the NFC behind the Eagles and Rams, pending the severity of Wentz's injury. Wow, the Vikings have sure benefited off the injuries of MVP-caliber QB's this year. Sheesh... And I don't want to hear any of that mumbo-jumbo about "our starting QB is hurt too" as Bradford:

A.) Was always going to get hurt

B.) Has played 2 good games in his career - last year vs. the Packers and this year's season opener vs. the Saints

C.) WAS ALWAYS GOING TO GET FUCKING HURT ANYWAYS

Also, that hit on Rodgers, and the hit on Goff last month, by Barr were mostly definitely filled with intent. I don't need anyone to tell me otherwise. I do have eyes, you know...)

I thought they were, which still makes them, subsequently, the third best team in the NFC this year. Good times...

Another solid performance from our defense and, this time, our special teams. Our offense continues to put our defense in very difficult positions and refuses to help them out after the first five minutes of the game up until the last five minutes of the game it seems. And Clay, Mr. "ARE YOU TAKING ALL YOUR TINY SHAMPOOS?" Matthews seems to find ways to make big plays in big moments, despite his injuries. Ha Ha, who I PREDICTED WOULD START MAKING SOME BIG PLAYS, made what turned out to be an enormous, points-saving interception at the end of the first half.

Sadly, we have another week of people who don't watch football but insist on giving you their opinion based on their scanning of the Redzone channel and the stats from their fantasy football league calling Brett Hundley a good quarterback. I even heard one announcer say "Teams are definitely going to take a look at this young man once the season is over." Why? Are there a lot of teams in need of, and willing to overpay for, a mediocre backup QB? Oh wait, that's right, Scott Tolzien, Mike Glennon, Geno Smith, Brock Osweiler, Ryan Mallett, Matt Barkley, Matt Cassel, Matt Schaub, Kellen Moore, etc. all got paid by new teams despite their old teams deeming them not worth it after watching them every single day in practice. So, yeah, I guess teams are in need of, and willing to overpay for, an average backup.

But his stat line, again, belied his play:

35/46 - 265 yards - 3 TD's - no picks - 31 yards rushing

It looks good right? Well, if you watched the game, it wasn't. Hundley is great on the first drive and the last two drives of each game it seems. He led 3 TD drives in the 4th quarter and overtime. He reminds me of someone... Wait... There's someone I can remember who was painful to watch for the first three quarters of a football game but somehow turned into a touchdown machine in the 4th quarter and seemingly pulled win after win out of his ass... No... It can't be... Brett Hundley is like... TIM TEBOW... HE'S BACK...

To be fair, Hundley is not as painful to watch when throwing a football as Tebow, but goddamn he sure plays a lot like him.

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

Goddamn, Asperger's is a bitch sometimes... Take today for instance. My girlfriend and I went to go get some lunch at a local place we have been wanting to try forever (like five years). Easy right? Sounds fun, trying a new place we're both excited about. Well, we get there and it seems a little out of sorts. The workers are all unaware of what anyone else is doing and seem generally very disorganized. Whatever, the food smells great. I order my food and it's a little more expensive than I would've thought but who cares if it's good, right? Well, it was... fine. Irritated that I just overpaid for a mediocre meal, I try not to lose my shit. I'm stewing and wishing I hadn't paid for it. My poor girlfriend is trying to casually enjoy her mediocre food but can't because of me. I obviously don't want to start ranting and raving about how overpriced the mediocre food is in the middle of the day during the late lunch rush, but fuck I really want to punch someone. It ruins my day, until...

So, I'm shooting a music video later this week for "Lookin' at Luckey" which is fucking awesome. It's my favorite song on the album and it's sounding like it's going to be an amazing video. The director I'm working with MADE THIS, which is unbelievably good, and I'm putting on makeup for the first time; which, I'm not sure I can get better looking but let's try. It's all very exciting. So exciting, in fact, that I went out and actually bought some new clothes for the shoot. Now, I never buy new clothes. "Why?" you may ask. Well, for multiple reasons. Hmm... Let's see:

- I hate spending money on things that aren't music, food or booze, generally I hate spending money on things that aren't experiences

- I hate going to places where lots of people are, like stores or malls (Thanks Asperger's!)

- I like to wear the same things every day, over and over and over (Thank's Asperger's!)

- When I do actually buy new clothes, I hate to wear them so I won't ruin them (just me being cheap and/or weird, I guess)

So, it was weird for me to actually spend some money on myself but I DO GET TO WRITE IT OFF, so I have that going for me, which is nice. I was excited. Some nice new clothes that will look great on camera. EXCEPT, I wash the jeans and now there is a huge spot where the sticker that shows the size (31x30, I'm not ashamed) was and it won't wash off. What the fuck? This is fucking madness. This never happens on the $40 Levi's I buy once every six years. WHAT THE FUCK? I don't get it. I desperately search online for a store that has the same size in stock so I can swap them out for a new pair. No dice. I'm pissed. I feel deceived. I feel ripped off and taken advantage of. MY BRAND NEW PAIR OF FUCKING JEANS LOOKS FUCKING STUPID AND ARE GOING TO LOOK EVEN FUCKING STUPIDER ON CAMERA! I couldn't be more angry. I hate it. I feel stupid. "This is why I don't deserve nice things..." I think. I'm so depressed about it that I can't eat dinner. My day is ruined, AGAIN...

And, once again, my poor girlfriend has to deal with this shit. I have some Krud Kutter goo be gone or whatever the fuck it's called which should take off any glue residue and then I'll rewash them. Seems simple enough but I can't get over the emotional toll it has taken. IT'S ABOUT AS DEPRESSING/RIDICULOUS AS THIS. "And who could understand the all-consuming pain? Only a man who's weeping in the rain knows where to go..." Wow. But Billy Joel was certainly on the spectrum and has many songs, INCLUDING THIS ONE, that are about it, whether he knows it or not. Billy, I know why you go to extremes, it's call the spectrum, bud.

This song saved my life once. I wish that was me being overly dramatic, like I so often am. I remember having an anxiety attack in a hotel room somewhere in Eastern Washington and trying to not jump out the window into traffic. All I wanted to do was drink until I couldn't remember and be done. I can't remember where that thought came from but I knew I needed to get out my room. It was after midnight (not in an Eric Clapton kind of way) so I wasn't sure what to do. I got in my car and just started driving. Frightened Rabbit's "Midnight Organ Fight" was in the stereo and was playing, though I wasn't paying much attention. After about 30 minutes, this song came on. I didn't know where I was or where I was going but this song felt so sad in a peaceful sort of way for some reason. I started crying. I didn't know what was happening as I sped along past the farm fields and empty landscapes. I just kept pressing the back button to start this song over again, and again and again and again. Occasionally, I'd pass a semi-truck trying to make up time to somewhere but it was pretty much just me out there. Mostly, I just stared out the passenger side window and watched the so-dark-they-seemed-infinite fields while playing this song on repeat. I must've driven for at least two or three hours as my half-full gas tank was starting to run low. I pulled off to try and check my phone's GPS to see where I was but I must've gone too far since I had no signal. I drove on and found signs for I-84. I had driven all the way back to Oregon, I guess. I'm glad this song came on since speeding along at 80 miles an hour in that state of mind is probably not the best thing one can do. Anyways, thanks Frightened Rabbit...

Holy shit, it's almost 2018... Let's recap this crazy year, in music of course...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

Honestly (as if I've ever been anything less than honest with you people), the Packers probably had no business taking this game. The "Battle of the Bays" was won by defense, special teams, some new plays and some lucky bounces. I was texting my brother the entire game "we'll win if we just don't throw it." This became the "just don't throw it" game. Every first down, every third down, every big play "just don't throw it" showed up on my phone, either from Jobe or to Jobe from me. It was our rallying cry, and... it fucking worked! That Williams kid is a beast and had some 2013-2014 Lacy-esque, I'm-fucking-tougher-than-you big boy runs, like his touchdown carry. And, of course, Aaron Jones, the rookie sensation who somehow is back only two weeks after hurting his knee, had one run for twenty yards, and, oh yeah, the fucking game winning score. I love those kids and they're only going to get better...

For anyone who didn't know how brilliant Kenny Clark has been playing this year and was questioning Clay Matthews III and his abilities/impact, welcome back to the real world. 4 1/2 sacks between them, and an unreal impact on the running game. Those kids just fucking know how to play ball. I know people complain about Clay and his seemingly annual ailments but injuries happen and we shouldn't hold it against him; though I do believe health is a skill, just look at Brett Favre. Also, I remember Reggie White playing with a torn knee ligament and destroying the Bears after they tried to cut-block him on like the second snap or something, which fucking pissed him off, and he played the rest of the game like a hungry lion who only ate quarterbacks and running backs. I can't remember who, but someone this week got a sack off the "hump move" which I haven't seen for years. I don't know how a move could be so devastating yet so unachievable by anyone else. Goddamn, Reggie was special. Wait, he was a preacher, so I'll rephrase "man, Reggie was special." God bless him and God rest his soul. Truly one of a kind... Anyhow, on to the music.

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

I wasn't able to post this on Monday like normal due to being out of town (and busy) at a show. My good friend Jonathan Fickes' band A View of Earth from the Moon had an album release show and party over the weekend which I was fucking thrilled to attend. That man is true talent and I got to see, and smoke way too many cigarettes with, some old friends. Life's journey is funny, but never as predictable it seems. Anywhosal...

One of the only good things about the internet is Spotify. I find more new music on there than anywhere else. Tastemakers and aggregate websites seem to be a dying breed. No one reliably tells me who is good and who isn't anymore, like Pitchfork used to (or B-Sides in Madison, WI, one of my all-time favorite record stores). I spend more money on Spotify recommendations (yes, I still buy music. Hello? Independent/struggling artist) than on music from anywhere else.

But, one of my favorite things is when they send end of year playlists. It's strange, and always surprising, to see what I listened to the most during the past year, so today I wanted to go over some of the highlights. It's not what I expected but some strange events played into that, which I'll discuss. Here are some of the songs I spun (nope, clicked) the most in 2017:

1. This is a phenomenal album that I could listen to front to back, many times over.

2. I was forced to listen to this album front to back, many times over.

Why was I forced to listen to this album front to back, many times over? That's a fair question. Well, I heard "Not the End" on a Spotify playlist and listened to it over and over for an hour or so while driving. Seeing as I had indulged in Courtney Marie Andrews' sweet melodies for that long, I purchased the album and popped it in for an upcoming five hour drive. I brought along about five or six other CD's that I would switch out along the way but fate intervened. As soon as I left Baker City, OR it began to snow. As I approached La Grande, OR it began to snow, hard. Soon, the freeways were being blocked off but I was already cruising. I got stuck behind the snow plow trucks trying desperately to clear the roadways; at thirty miles per hour. For the first six hours of my return trip, stuck behind those plows, the roads were still so treacherous that I was unable to change CD's as my car kept sliding around and I was trying desperately to not drive off one of the many cliffs I was passing. So, for six hours straight I played "Honest Life" by Courtney on repeat, listening intently so I wouldn't notice my car sliding dangerously towards the edge, towards my impending death, time and time again, during what turned out to be my ten hour drive back to Portland.

Probably my favorite live show from 2017. It's rare I get to just lose myself (in the music, the moment, you own it) and became an unabashed fan, yelling along to every word from the front of the pit with the other die-hards. This show released my inner fan in a way I haven't experienced since watching maybe Ryan Adams, the Hold Steady, Jon Fickes (on Sunday) or Joanna Newsom (take your pick).

Probably my second favorite live show from 2017. There's just something about their albums "Life After Youth" and "Some are Lakes" that just hit me where I need it. Not sure exactly what it is, but I love it and want more of it.

I know I've posted this song before but it never gets any less impressive each time I listen to it. Maybe Steve would never reach these heights again on a recording but, goddamn, did he nail it at least once on this beauty. Also, I love the home movie style video linked above that has the "Classics Disco" tag in the corner... Clearly shot when videographers thought VHS would supplant film in the movie world. Boy, were they wrong...

I found this record last year and was moderately intrigued. It popped back up on a Spotify playlist a few months later and I couldn't stop playing this on repeat. Their incessant hipster-ing is borderline annoying but the tunes, especially this one, are just too good to hate.

Couldn't find a decent live video for this one, but goddamn is this a beautiful song. Again, Spotify said "Bradley, I think you're gonna like this shit muthafucker" and they were right. The first time I heard this I was cleaning the house (which I do every Saturday) and played this song on repeat for the 1 1/2 hours it takes me to finish. Almost every time, except for a couple moments when the vacuum was going, I found myself getting lost in the melodies and wonder of this song and completely forgetting that I was cleaning the fucking toilet or whatever. I did this for three weeks straight, listening to this song probably, what is that, 70 times and never once got sick of it. It landed on some playlists which pushed it up onto my 2017 most played tracks.

Again, no good live video but this song doesn't need any of my yammering or bullshit to make it brilliant. Not sure why but "14 Songs" had a huge comeback this past year and I couldn't stop spinning, or clicking, or pushing the "track forward" button until #11 to hear this fucking song.

Live from a stage I've graced more than once. Fuck, is it just me or is the singer absurdly attractive? It took until this past year to finally get on board with this band. I can't remember why I wrote them off initially but I'm glad I gave them a second chance. Damn, Scottish girls are hot...

I'll never forget the first time I heard this song and the asshole who played it for me. He thought it was the funniest thing he'd ever heard. He repeatedly called Wesley a retard and said this was the dumbest and most hilarious shit he'd ever heard. It was obvious there was more going on and I was very interested in learning about Wesley. I watched "The Daddy of Rock 'n' Roll" and my heart nearly exploded for this man. His music never sounded the same to me after that. All I hear now is the pain and the anger and the hurt and the love and the compassion and the desire and the beauty that isn't obviously clear. Once I left my small town in southeastern Wisconsin, I found friends who felt the same and got this music for what it was: tortured, more than anything else.

I don't know what else to say. I could go on from my "Top Songs of 2017" playlist all night but these are the highlights. Peace Bitches!

(dictated but not read. Fuck, what do you expect? It's goddamn 2:30 in the morning)

A VIEW OF EARTH FROM THE MOON'S DEBUT SINGLE/VIDEO FOR "DISTANCE RUNNER" AND, OF COURSE, SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS...

As promised, here is part II of this weeks blog. I wrote more than I anticipated about my beloved Green Bay Packers and then got caught up watching silly BRETT FAVRE VIDEOS, then LIVE GENESIS VIDEOS (Phil is such an underrated singer, probably due to his obsession with pleated pants), then SHAKIRA VIDEOS (goddamn, she's so sexy, like, way too fucking sexy), then, at five or six bourbons in, I forgot what I was doing and starting watching "Skins" on Netflix (Cassie still breaks my heart in each episode she's in) before drinking a glass of Kava and finally falling asleep... Wait, what was I talking about again? Oh yeah, music.

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

This week revealed the long-awaited debut single, and accompanying video, from Jon(athan) Fickes' new project called A View of Earth from the Moon. The song, "Distance Runner," gives us a taste of what we can expect from his upcoming album "Closer to a Ghost" which will be released this Friday, 12/1/2017. And, holy shit, if this is the taste, I can't wait for the fucking meal.

In "Distance Runner," Fickes is hurling choruses at us straight down from pop-heaven, delivering cheeky, yet clever (and seemingly throwaway, yet casually brilliant), lines like "your mind is like a blender, you're like a banana" while drenching us in wonderfully warm, distorted, Oasis-style guitars that really tie the song together. The crux of the song finally reveals itself when Fickes earnestly, and perhaps desperately, asks "Are you running away? Or, are you chasing something?" The juxtaposition of this revelation against the almost willfully-deceiving upbeat nature of the song underscores the sadness Jonathan is barely trying to hide from the world while calling for us to let it out and join him. He knows what he's doing, and I love every minute of it.

There's a joy that comes through the music, despite it's underlying heartache, which can probably be attributed to Jonathan taking over every aspect of the music ("I guess you could call it a solo record because this was the first time I did everything by myself. No live band in the studio, just me racking up countless hours of studio time, haha.”) and forging this into "everything I've always wanted a record to be," according to Fickes. The established history for singer/songwriters breaking off and bogarting an album is dim, but Jonathan pulls it off beautifully. This feels like his most developed and complete album to date. Yes, we reveled in the effortless genius of "Never Love Again (It's Doubtful)" but that turned out to be the carefully curated charcuterie plate before this, our veal parmesan of a meal. We knew it would be delicious, but we didn't know just how fucking delicious it would be.

The video for "Distance Runner" is equally as fun as we follow Fickes on his journey through time and space. OK, just through space, or, at least, the 180 miles from Seattle to Moses Lake, WA (Jonathan's hometown), as he laments his inability to literally travel back in time (HUEY LEWIS STYLE) and tries to live, if only for a moment, in the past by going back to his childhood home and playing music with his old friends in the living room of his parents' house. The video assumes the theme of Jonathan trying to run, again literally, from his current state of loneliness and disappointment by temporarily escaping the temporal world and reveling in the comfort of a fondly remembered youth. Despite this, and after his long journey, he dutifully turns and heads back to reality; almost as if waking from the dream or realizing the idealized version of returning home doesn't exist, or perhaps having already fulfilled his nostalgic needs there's no reason to stay. Along the way, there are countless beautifully constructed shots as we take this idyllic trip alongside Fickes. Kudos to the director who instills us with a sense of wonder while we root for, and hope, Jonathan finds what he is looking for, knowing full well it's probably just a momentary distraction from himself that he's after.

I was lucky enough to hear the album in total and I won't spoil it, but, Jesus, you're in for a treat (and so are all the rest of you not named "Jesus"). I'll have a full album review here in the next couple weeks, as I want time to fully marinate in the tunes like a soon-to-be delicious piece of chicken.

Holy shit! The Packers finally give me something to write about!

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

Well, I guess it's Run the Table 2.0 time. That was the last loss we had to give, and a fucking devastating one at that. Even 10-6 isn't postage-guaranteed for a return trip to the playoffs, we'll need a lot of help, which puts us in the unenviable position of rooting for the Vikings (I just got shivers...) the next couple weeks as they take on the Falcons and Panthers. Also, the Saints need start winning again, stat. Also (fuck, feel like I'm using the "also" quite a bit, not good...), we need either the Seahawks, who traditionally play their best football in December and January but this year are without Sherman and Chancellor (unfortunately, if you're rooting against them and are a terrible person who likes injuries, which I just might be, well, nope, never mind, that's just fucking mean, their best player on defense, Earl Thomas, and their best player overall, Russell Wilson, are still both OK, for now), or the Rams, who are flying a little too close to the sun perhaps, to start losing and start losing hard. I'm hoping the Rams might still have some latent Jeff Fisher stink on them, which I hear comes with side-effects warnings like:

- playoff football may cause severe allergic reactions, including death; avoid at all costs

- may cause QB's to play like they just chugged a cup of NyQuil instead of Gatorade (which in addition to sleepiness will bring on that queasy, I-just-drank-too-much-NyQuil stomach-ache which I've known well. I recall an experience of that happening during a show at Ash Street Saloon HERE IN AN INTERVIEW, a little over halfway down the page)

- inability to call vertical pass plays

- obsessively trying to get the ball to Percy Harvin 2.0 (this model without the locker room self-destruct mode) a.k.a. Tavon Austin who literally had this stat line for a game this season:

So to recap: Go Saint...nope and go Vik...nope, can't do it. Go division leaders and I curse all ye wild-card teams, this be you Seahawks, Falcons, Panthers, Lions...

But, all is not lost. All is not lost, yet...

"Why?" you may ask. Well, the Packers defense played it's third good game in a row and fifth good game of the season. Yes, Clay is out, again (AND JUST AS THEY START AIRING HIS AND AARON'S BEST COMMERCIAL THUS FAR), Kenny Clark is out too, but luckily avoided serious injury and will be back sooner than later, and Kevin King, who is playing far beyond what you could reasonably expect from a rookie corner not named Marshon Lattimore (who is also hurt), has a bum shoulder that will probably not heal til he stops hitting other absurdly large, fast and strong men with it. We did, however, get Morgan Burnett back whose impact cannot be overstated. I think we'll see a Ha Ha resurgence resurgence now that he's not calling plays and can focus on just being his Ha Ha self self. Damarious Randall is again playing like the ball-hawk he truly is when he's not hurt (cramping scare but came back to make what should've been a game-saving pass breakup). And Mike Daniels is looking like, well, Mike Daniels again. His hip injury seems to be long gone at this point. Defensively, our biggest issue is our lack of pass rush. Nick Perry had his fair share of 1 on 1's and wasn't winning them like we've seen him do in the past. Maybe the hand is bothering him or maybe something else is hurting/holding him back after slamming into 300 lb. behemoths for over two months. But Clay being gone certainly hurts. And with Kenny Clark not eating blocks like usual, it makes it more difficult for Daniels, Dial, Ahmad Brooks, Dean Lowry, Fackrell, etc. to get any steady rush. All of our sacks the past couple weeks have been the result of great coverage, which after all the flak our DB's took last year (due to a ridiculous rash of injuries) must be redemptive, to a degree. But in the 4th quarter when we really needed some pressure, Ben had all the time he needed to finish this fucker off...

My only complaint about the D is that on that final drive you know that Ben is looking towards Antonio Brown and that they need to get at least one, if not two, pass plays to the sideline to stop the clock and somehow we give up two consecutive sideline passes to AB. Yes, I realize one was an absurd catch but he never should've had the opportunity to make that catch. I read a comparison to the Rodgers to Cook play last year against Dallas in the playoffs and it was dismissed since that happened in a playoff game which carried more weight. This game was like a playoff game for us, as it might have just knocked us out.

But, all is not lost. All is not lost, yet...

This time you ask yourself "how?" I will tell you for how. Brett Hundley has the skills to win us a couple football games against Tampa Bay and Cleveland. We know he can MAKE THROWS LIKE THIS which looks like a video game glitch when the game forgets to make a catching motion and the ball just sticks into the receiver's hands. Seriously, not enough credit has been given to Davante Adams for that game-sealing catch. Fuller, the Bears best coverage guy in my opinion, was in position but interfered (not called) by essentially holding hands with Adams so he couldn't catch the ball. Only a perfect throw would suffice in this instance as Davante, watch it again, HAD TO CATCH IT WITH ONE HAND. It wasn't a stylistic choice. And that's the second part of this. Davante has turned into a poor man's DeAndre Hopkins and is still getting better. His footwork is absurd. He's probably a great basketball player and could've been a world-champion tennis player if he'd wanted to be. I love when they show replays of him coming off the line, it's like football poetry in motion. It might not be Odell Beckham and Antonio Brown-level, but it isn't far off and he's definitely not yet the player he ultimately will become. He's stolen the WR1 role, as evidenced by the way Minnesota defended him earlier this year, with Xavier Rhodes following him around much of the game.

The one quibble I have with the "Brett Hundley is now great" (after the week of everyone wanting Big Tom Callahan's son, aka Joe Callahan, to step in and play quarterback for the Green Bay Packers instead of taking up the family's brake pad business) crowd is that the enthusiasm needs to be tempered. Collinsworth said during the game that even if Rodgers was in the game, he couldn't play much better, which is borderline insane. Yes, Hundley's stats look great:

- 17 of 26, for 245 yards, a 9.4 yard average and 3 TD's, no picks or fumbles

But the reality is that over half of that came on the three long touchdown plays, one of which was a completely blown coverage (Cobb TD), one was a screen pass where the line and Williams did all the work and the third was a good read and throw after Davante made a pro look like college kid and was at least five yards past him and then proceeded to make two people miss on his jaunt to the endzone. That second to last drive was very impressive, no doubt. I'm not taking anything away from that. But going three and out after two of the three turnovers doesn't help capitalize on the momentum and, in fact, usually gives it back to the other team as they know they can turn it over and it doesn't hurt them at all. We saw that in the Saints game and it bit us in the ass in this game as well. Hundley definitely has the skills, and though OUR OLD FRIEND VIC would say: "there is no FULL CONSISTENCY," he still needs to get a little more out of the drives that don't end in long TD's. He's a little too boom or bust. TD toss or three and out is a tough way to close out games and win consistently. But, as the Baltimore game showed us, interception or three and out is goddamn unwatchable, so at least we're headed in the right direction.

And don't even get me started on the lack of flag for the helmet to helmet from JJ's little brother. It was so obvious when it happened. You could hear the sound, which is like the sound of the ball jumping off the bat for a home run, so unique, but terrible instead of beautiful (although it's becoming a little too obvious that they JUICED THE BASEBALLS which I ALREADY WROTE ABOUT HERE which I do not like in the least. Please, Baseball, don't make me stop watching you again like back in 2001), and by the fact that Hundley just fell down. He didn't fall like he got walloped normally. He fell like he was hit in the head and forgot what he was doing. Trust me, I've been there. I'm sure TJ will be fined, but that doesn't change the game like the penalty could have. I hope Hundley's OK. I know for at least one or two of my concussions I didn't have symptoms until much later, sometimes the next day. I hope he's not concussed. Shit, I hope I didn't just jinx him. Fuck, knocking on wood now. Sorry mate.

Thanks for not getting me started.

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

It is getting quite late and I wanted to dedicate more time to the Packers this week as the last couple weeks there was so little to write about. I'll be back tomorrow with my musical update.

Ummm, the Packers played? Well, the defense showed up, at least. Oh, and I showed up and actually played a fucking show for the first time in, well, way too fucking long...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

Well, fuck. I thought the Lions game a couple weeks ago was bad... Our defense finally steps up their game (I know the Joe Flaccid and the Ravens' offense aren't the greatest test, but our D really did play well despite the "Injury Shadow Monster" claiming two more of our best defenders in Clay Matthews III and Kenny Clark) and Brett Hundley plays like, ugh, this is painful to say, but... Jay Cutler... Yep, let's take a look at their respective box scores from this week:

Jay did leave with a concussion (seems like he started with one) so he didn't have time to rack up those additional yards in garbage time like usual, otherwise the numbers would've been closer. But, man, those lines fucking suck. I'm not sure who did worse. Jay Cutler threw three interceptions in less attempts but also threw a TD. Brett Hundley, well, he was just awful. I don't think playing the Steelers next week help him either, but at least people haven't watched Brett Hundley do this for over 10 years and still think "maybe this is the year he turns it around..." So, Brett Hundley has that going for him, which is nice...

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

There's only one thing happening this week in music (hey, that's the name of this segment!) and that is Julien Baker's "Turn Out The Lights." Seriously, just, what the fuck... This is an absolutely amazingly sad and awesome record start to finish. I had heard a lot of hoopla about her first record and gave it a few listens. I was not impressed but also not unimpressed. It was, fine. But Jesus, this album... I'd try and write words about it but I'm too fucking tired (it's been a long week), and I'd rather listen to this record (one more time before I pass out) than write about it. So, I will. I listened to this album on repeat from Spokane to Portland (almost 6 hours) and then from Portland to Lebanon and back (about 1 1/2 hours each way). Just watch this and buy this goddamn record:

One last thing, thanks again to all those who came out to Conversion Brewing on Saturday and to those who watched via Periscope. It was my first show in over a year and a half and it felt brilliant. I didn't realize how much I missed it. I can't wait to start touring again and doing that on a regular basis. Lebanon, you were a great host and I can't wait to see you again.

Lord, thank you. At least the Bears still suck...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

We did it! We really did it! We won a game without our lord and saviour, Aaron Rodgers! The defense stepped up huge and, naturally, won't get the credit it deserves since it seems Packers fans only love offense, though our last two Super Bowl wins have come on the backs of our defenses both times. Yes, the offenses played well in them, and in XXXI, obviously, our special teams was off the fucking charts, but it was mostly our D that got us there. Our special teams Sunday was, well, they were there too. It's so tough to be on our third long snapper this season, which has to be some kind of record. Of course, the injury bug, well, it's not exactly a bug anymore, it's probably best to call it the "Injury Shadow Monster" as it has been slowly taking over our players one by one FUCKING WILL BYERS STYLE, continues to ravage us, this week taking our top two running backs including our outstanding rookie Aaron Jones and Ty Montgomery after he made a great run. Do not make a great play as a Green Bay Packer running back. It seems to doom you the last couple years, suspiciously starting around the same time "Stranger Things" has been on the air... Hmmm...

But, man, did Brett Hundley MAKE SOME FUCKING THROWS. And, a flat out amazing catch on the other end of that throw by Davante Adams. Although, it was very irritating that everyone seemed amazed by the fact he made that catch one-handed, but no one commented on the fact that the DB grabbed his other arm so he fucking had to catch it one-handed. Anyhow, I'm so glad Ted Thompson (and me, as I totally called it and told everyone who would listen) doesn't listen to the fans and didn't even think of giving up on this kid a couple years back when he was struggling with foot and ankle injuries (which, his game is based on his ridiculously quick feet and great foot work/balance). He's a borderline superstar and probably our most reliable WR, though I think Cobb could be more involved but that's just me. And, Davante somehow has the cure for concussions in his blood. I need some of that. I've had two in the past year due to getting rear-ended while stopped at a red light. Just sitting at red lights, FUCKING BOTH TIMES. So aggravating. Mine lasted over a month each, the second was almost two months. Davante has a horrific hit to the head and is back to catch the game winner a week and a half later. Magic. I realize now that mine are worse because those were concussions #5 and #6 (that I know of) and, more importantly, my brain doesn't completely fit properly into my head making me more susceptible to it knocking into my skull and concussing me. It's a long story but let's just say I had skull removal and skull reattachment surgery.

Sidenote: how far we have fallen. At the beginning of each season, I have my brother buy the nflsundayticket.tv package ($100 for a student, $300 for a regular ass adult like me) for me. Normally, the Packers only have a handful of games not on national television. Starting a couple weeks ago, when, oh, I don't remember, but something happened and our great and fearless leader, a one, Mr. Aaron Rodgers somehow got hurt (I can't remember who did that to him. Oh, wait, of course I fucking remember who did this one to him, Mr., nope, not fucking "Mr.," I'll call you Tony Barr. I even had a good cheer to myself earlier this season when Shea McClellin went on IR... I know, it's horrible to cheer injuries but that one was even more egregious than Tony Barr's hit. Fuck 'em both...), we all knew our national television games were over. I'm so glad my brother can hook me up with a cheap Sunday Ticket package, otherwise I'd be back to spending $50-70 per game at one of the local Packers bars, probably Corbett's Fish House, and hoping they cleaned the grill enough after cooking the shrimp so I don't get sick again. I don't hold it against them. How could they know I have a shellfish allergy? Plus, their perch is so fucking tasty... Mmmm, perch... Wait, what was I talking about?

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

This week, on Saturday November 18th at 8pm, I will be playing my first show in over a year at Conversion Brewing in Lebanon, OR. It's not a big show and I will be playing it as a duo, not a full band, with Brianne Kathleen assisting me on vocals but I couldn't be more excited. After all the drama (fights, screaming matches, near lawsuits, sexism, pure insanity and, unfortunately I'm not kidding, deaths) and delays and delays and delays and, yep, you guessed it, more delays, I'm so excited to play again. I'll definitely be touring soon, but I haven't decided where and when quite yet. Honestly, a lot of that went out the window when I lost the last 2 months (and wasn't sure how much longer so I couldn't schedule anything) before the album release due to, yep, you guessed it, a concussion. I'm so glad to have put that behind me but man did it fuck shit up for me.

For once, it's been a good week for me, mentally and emotionally. The discovery of Kava has certainly helped. But, aside from that things just seem like they're going to be OK. Not good, but OK and that's better than it's been in a while so I'll take it. Unfortunately, over the weekend I suffered a minor setback that threw me into a tailspin but it was nothing a trip to Music Millennium couldn't fix. I found a vinyl copy of an album that has helped me through some (mostly self-inflicted) emotionally dire times: "Bee Thousand" by Guided by Voices. For those unaware of this band, I WROTE ABOUT THEM A LONG TIME AGO while going through, or possibly right after a breakup (I can't remember). For those who didn't read my 3-4 times-a-year blog (bradleywik.blogspot.com) back then, I'll get you up to speed.

Guided by Voices is an acquired taste. I was talking with my brother recently and compared them to drinking Campari, on the rocks, the only way to drink that shit. Zissou fans get it. To give you another idea of their strange, beautiful, amazing, heart-string (as if there were such a thing) tugging music, the best song on "Bee Thousand" is called "TRACTOR RAPE CHAIN." It's a lament surrounding a diminishing relationship that has dissolved because of mistrust. A place we've all been. Well, hopefully, some of you haven't because IT FUCKING SUCKS. But, Mr. Robert Pollard nails the hurt and paranoia and the (mostly) self-inflicted mental and emotional chaos that can ensue. My other favorite song on the album is, for reasons unknown, but I continually wake with this song kicking in my head, "THE GOLDHEART MOUNTAINTOP QUEEN DIRECTORY." Yep, it's that kind of band. They have a song called "KICKER OF ELVES." Seriously. So, I'll pass along the same advice I gave to my brother upon his introduction to this band: sit and listen to the album as a whole and listen to it at least twice. Don't put it on while you're at work or jogging or doing laundry or whatever, just sit and listen to it (an odd concept these days, I know. I might be the only one I know who dedicates hours and hours per week to just listen to music. It's fucking art people, and you shouldn't devalue it. Sorry, don't want to get to far up onto my soapbox). I wasn't sure what I was getting into myself all those years ago, but I remember being slightly confused until subsequent listens, in which, I fell in love. So, fire up the Spotify, Google, Apple Music, iTunes, Napster, Rhapsody (god, it's easy to listen to music for nothing or almost nothing these days... Sorry, getting back down, again...) and look up "Bee Thousand" by Guided by Voices. You won't be disappointed; unless you take my advice in extremely high regard, have a listen and really don't like them, in which case, you might be. But, I can't help that, so fuck it.

My advice this week is to live free or die hard... Just kidding, that movie sucked.

This one doesn't deserve a fucking title...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

Thoroughly outplayed on offense, defense and special teams. Not good. Next question...

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

Honestly (as if I've ever been anything but honest on this blog), I barely remember this week. It was a fucking blur. I think I've listened to a total of 2 hours of music this week. It's just been one of those weeks so I don't really have anything to share with you. To sum up the week, I tried washing one of my cat's food dishes and dropped and broke it (this is the third one this year) because I couldn't remember what I was doing. Wasn't drunk or high or anything weird, I was just that fucking out of it. It's just like that and I feel as though I've let you down. Sorry team...

But, on a good note, I did start writing some new tunes. I haven't written in a little while and it felt good to get back into it. I typically don't write songs unless I need or want new songs for a project/show/etc. but I've been feeling stagnant and ready for something new. I completed the songs for my next couple projects a while back and have been waiting to see what direction I'd like to take for any new songs. Would they be tunes for the solo record I've wanted to make for a bit? Would they be songs for the new Brianne Kathleen and Bradley Wik project? Would they be more Rock N' Roll for the BWC follow up album? Normally, I'd wait to figure that out but this week I was itching for some new words to sing. So, I sat down and wrote a couple songs. I've never been the type to just sit down and write, I've always been a "when the mood strikes" kind of guy. But, it was fun and it was a good learning experience. No, they aren't show stoppers, and I might never play them live, but it felt so fucking good to start working on a new project again; whatever that may be.

Anyways, sorry for the brevity but I feel like shit and the Packers game didn't help at all...

So, I'll leave you with one of the most fucking unbelievably awesome things I've ever seen...

World Series thoughts, NASCAR, twee records, oh my...

GREEN BAY PACKERS WEEKLY RECAP:

Well, Aaron Rodgers IS NONE TOO PLEASED WITH ANTHONY BARR, but he's also pretty fucking funny. But, he should be pissed. That hit was borderline legal/dirty but 100% unnecessary. There was no need to drive a fellow professional football player into the ground shoulder first. I get that Barr wants us to "GET OVER IT," but I assure you he wouldn't be over it if he was out for the next two months and just had screws and a plate inserted into his fucking collarbone. Asshole...

Brett Hundley didn't look bad this week, though. Of course, it's the bye week and he didn't play, but nevertheless. I'm kidding of course. I believe the kid will be alright. McCarthy knows how to coach QB's and I love Hundley's confidence. I keep finding myself wanting to say "Brett" but we all know no Green Bay quarterback is "Brett" besides the one and only. The greatest ever. The man who saved our franchise. The one who brought the Lombardi Trophy home. Anyways, not too much Packers news and I didn't watch any football this weekend since:

Yes, I watch NASCAR, and yes, I am a huge Chase Elliott fan. I always enjoyed his dad as a racer (I was more of a Rusty Wallace fan but it was hard not to root for Bill) but this kid is special. He's still only 21. But, he more than likely had this race, Martinsville of all places, one of the most prestigious tracks, one his dad never won at, won and was only a few laps from taking his first checkered flag. He now has 6 or 7 races that he has almost won or finished 2nd in. Heart-breaking for the kid. He even overcame his past troubles with restarts to get back into the lead multiple times. And then to be cheap-shotted and wrecked from behind, I don't know how he didn't throw a punch. Denny Hamlin certainly would've deserved it...

By the way, what the fuck is this World Series?! And, yes, THE BASEBALLS ARE 100% DIFFERENT AND JUICED. I have no doubt about that. There was a replay of Carlos Correa during game 5 hitting his crazy high fly ball, and after a second or so a look of shock came across his face when he saw it had a chance to get out. He clearly was happy he lifted it to get Altuve home from third on the tag, but he was shocked to see it go out. These guys know. It's their job to know. As one of the pitchers, McCullers I believe, said pitching with these new baseballs was as if you wrote 10,000 times in a row with a #2 pencil then someone handed you a pen. You'd notice the difference. It's their livelihood and they're the best in the world at it; of course they would know if it was different. Dallas Keuchel said "Obviously, the balls are juiced. I think they're juiced 100 percent. But it is what it is." Far too many fly balls are ending up in the seats.

Now, I'm entertained by this Series, for sure, especially since the Astros are leading, but this is not the kind of baseball I want to see in the regular season, let alone the Series. 2000 more home runs this year vs. 2 seasons ago. More home runs than any year during the (ridiculously obvious) Steroid Era. C'mon... We're not that stupid are we? I spent my youth as a hit-for-average, hit-for-location, defensive shortstop so that's what I like to see. I loved the way the Royals won their series and am still flabbergasted by what Bumgarner did the year before. Those are my kind of Series. If baseball is going the way of the NFL, more points/runs and shootouts over defense, then count me out. It's the main reason I watched less than five minutes of football this weekend and I've been constantly frustrated by a couple games in this Series. It was very obvious when some of the best pitchers in the world, Kershaw, Verlander, Keuchel, have to go away from some of their best stuff. They didn't suddenly forget how to throw a baseball, but they can't suddenly learn how to throw a new one either...

THIS WEEK IN MUSIC:

Here I am, sitting at the desk in the... Wait, I'm fucking home for one of these! It's my cluttered, old, damaged, a little too dusty, slightly too small and kind-of-uncomfortable desk that I'm writing this from. This week has been a rough one for a number of reasons that I won't go into, as they are boring and best reserved for my (eventual) therapist. But, as always, I've gone back to music to help me through. I learned some cover songs for an upcoming show, relearned some old tunes of my own that I haven't played for probably 6-7 years and leaned heavy into some old "twee" records I haven't spun for years. So, what does melancholy Bradley listen to to brighten his spirits (or, more accurately, dwell upon his melancholy which makes him feel better somehow) during a rough week? Let's find out together... (Just kidding I already fucking know. But, I'll pretend not to so it's more fun.)

Camera Obscura - "Underachievers Please Try Harder"

As soon as those first descending notes of "SUSPENDED FROM CLASS" hit my earholes, I'm immediately transported back to Madison, WI and the house on East Johnson I shared with Jake, Quinn and Tyler. It was a crappy, old house but it was close to State Street and cheap enough (barely, well, not really, as we sometimes had to steal food in order to eat and pay rent in the same month) for 4 musicians with part-time jobs. I'll always remember walking the neighborhood with my Sony CD Discman and playing this album on repeat as I watched the other young kids, mostly students, unlike me, and tried to determine what their life's story was. In the summer, I would lay on the grass at James Madison Park, or "the JMP" as we called it, across the street and just people-watch. Yes, there were pretty girls but mostly it was about just experiencing the world outside of the tiny town of Horicon, WI and music was such a huge part of that. In the fall and winter, I would always wear my hoodie with my jacket so I could smuggle along a couple extra CD's to listen to on my walks. Just as I did in Horicon throughout my High School years, I would put on my headphones and just walk for hours. I loved it most when it was cold outside for some reason. I think it was because it was so peaceful, as Wisconsin in the wintertime is not a time for people to be outside, unless they are weird Asperger's kids who obsessively walk the same route over and over, day after day, listening to the same few records for months on end...

Belle and Sebastian - "If You're Feeling Sinister"

I remember not owning this record for years. Jake burned me a copy (Jake is the only person I've met who was more into discovering new, or new to him, artists and albums. He had WAY more music than I did so I was always poaching and burning CD's from him.) which I played for years until during a move I lost a ton of CD's, both real and burned copies. I still haven't remembered and repurchased all the albums I lost, so occasionally I'll stumble across something lost from long ago and be filled with the joy of rediscovering some beauty I misplaced along the way. The Weepies were like that. Somehow, they didn't make the "twee" music week. Hmmm...

Clap Your Hands Say Yeah - Eponymous

This isn't technically "twee," as I believe it falls into the "hipster as fuck" category. The intro track is borderline unbearable but the moment "LET THE COOL GODDESS RUST AWAY" kicks in, sweet Jesus, it is catchy, loose, silly, unintelligible but, most importantly, fun as hell. This is another one I stole as a burned copy from Jake (later to replace it with multiple purchased copies that I kept giving away to people who said they would "hate that shit." Some changed their minds, some couldn't fucking stand the singer's voice and never got past it. Sad for them...) and just played on repeat all summer long. The JMP, the beach volleyball, the flirting between the college boys and college girls, the seagulls, the smell of Lake Mendota, the small church on the far end of the park, the boat launch, the bench I would watch the waves from for hours, the swingset I'd swing on for the other hours in the day; all that was in this record for me. It was magical, it still is. Most people assimilate music to their lives; my life is moments of beauty or darkness dictated by the music. Time is ethereal yet fleeting and is no way to define a life. Music is my mileposts, I remember life through records, not records through life, if that makes sense. Whatever, it's getting late...

Goodnight to all my fellow travelers on this long, lonesome, Lost Highway...