Tag: sports

Expressing a desire to capture the “essence” of America’s greatest moments in sports, local artist Dee Collins unveiled her latest series of sports paintings this week. The collection, titled “Believe in the Unbelievable”, represents Collins’ third installment in the series.

“There are unforgettable moments in sports,” Collins said. “We remember exactly where we were when these events happened. I wanted to capture those moments for an eternity.”

The latest series consists of three paintings, including one titled “The Catch Everyone Keeps Talking About” featuring New England Patriots’ wide receiver Julian Edelman making what some called one of the greatest catches in Super Bowl history just last weekend.

Collins will have the paintings on display at her studio in Coma and reminded reporters that her work is for sale. Although she wouldn’t give specific details regarding cost, Collins said, she won’t consider anything less than five figures.

“You will not find paintings like these anywhere else in the world,” Collins said. “Literally. By definition a painting is unique. I’m willing to consider a discount if you bundle your purchase.”

The latest series also includes a painting of NBA legend Michael Jordan performing his signature slam dunk during the 1988 dunk contest and a painting of the most decorated athlete in Olympic history, Michael Phelps, competing at the 2012 Olympic games.

Collins, a prolific author, screenwriter and artist, said she has a passion for sports and that her work represents moments she remembered or learned about when doing an online search for “memorable sports moments.”

“I am a sports fan, for sure,” Collins said. “I like the New York Patriots and basketball teams and…golf balling is fun too.”

Collins said she expects this series of paintings to sell quickly, mostly because of the timing and the fact that so many people are still talking about the historic comeback and finish at last weekend’s Super Bowl in Houston.

ABOVE: Collins’ “Swimmer In the Pool” captures one of Michael Phelps most famous swims during the 2012 Summer Olympics

“Do you have fifteen thousand dollars and want to remember the incredible catch by Julius Edelen?” Collins posted on her website this week. “Then come down to Dee Collins studio and buy an original painting by Dee Collins.”

Collins said the paintings will remain on display until the end of the month or until they are sold out.

If fourth-grader Becky Watson was nervous entering her first match of the season, the emerging superstar didn’t show it.

“It wasn’t a big deal,” Watson said with a humility that has become part of her persona. “Is this going to be in the newspaper?”

Watson defeated perennial contender, Dusty Higgins, 3 sets to 1 during second recess at Coma Unified School on Wednesday afternoon in a hotly contested match that featured the taller Watson utilizing her reach advantage to take the final three sets after dropping the first.

“Shit just got so real in there,” recess monitor Heather Beaucraft said. Beaucraft, who officiated the match, said she was surprised at Watson’s skill so early in the season. “At first, it was like the shit wasn’t real at all, like it was pretend or something. Then suddenly, shit got real.”

Beaucraft said she was impressed by such skilled play so early in the season, particularly the efforts of Watson.

“It’s only January and you’re already bringing your A-game? Gonna be a long year for players in the yard if she’s stepping up like that already,” Beaucraft said. “Imagine how real that shits gonna be come May?”

The match got off to a controversial start when Watson was called for a double hit early in the first set. Soon after, she committed another unintentional foul when she stepped off sides. Both penalties gave Higgins the opening he needed to win the first set. Watson appeared to settle down after that and made quick work of Higgins over the next three sets.

Watson clearly benefitted from the nearly three-inch growth spurt she experienced over the summer. Many students were in disbelief when the gangly ten-year-old returned to class last fall.

“I thought she was a giant or something when I first seen her,” Mitch Pelfry, a classmate of Watson, said. “I kept calling her Optimus Prime all day because he’s in a movie and he’s really big like a giant made of metal.”

ABOVE: The start of the Coma Unified School’s tetherball season was fused with an intensity typically reserved for post-season play

While the fourth-grade tetherball season is just getting underway, it is not hard to envision Watson making a run at a championship. After failing to qualify for any post-season play last year, the dramatic turnaround seems to have caused a stir for everyone except the budding superstar.

“I have to go or I’m going to miss my bus,” Watson said when asked about her next opponent, Earl Chadwick. “I don’t want to get stuck sitting next to Duggar Meyers again. He’s gross.”

Watson’s schedule doesn’t get any easier with several first-recess matches coming up in the next week and a dreaded lunchtime-recess match against Kendra Perkins on February 10.

Beaucraft said she expects the shit to get very real in a hurry when Watson and Perkins square off.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movie films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the fall watching football and eating gently-peeled bananas.

What a crazy few weeks it has been around The Hutt household. Jabba has not been doing well. First, there was the ordeal with the deep fryer at Buffalo Wild Wings a few weeks ago. My hands are still wrapped from that little incident. Jabba has learned patience when it comes to waiting for deep-fried cheese curds. It is best to wait for the server to bring them to your table. It is not a self-serve sort of arrangement, if you know what I mean. Ha ha ha, ho ho ho! But seriously, it’s no laughing matter. My friend Greedo is actually typing this for me. I’m saying the words out loud and Greedo is typing them onto the computer.

Speaking of friends, I’d like to thank Boba Fett for filling in for me two weeks ago. Boba doesn’t know a lot about the football games, but he was pretty good in going 2 -2 with his picks. Not bad for a bounty hunter, am I right? LOL!

I intended to make my picks last week but fell asleep for nine days. It’s not uncommon for Hutts to sleep for very long periods of time. I remember one time while on a trip to the Kasian System, I fell asleep for 16 days straight. Crazy! I missed the star-studded cotillion on Monta, which was the whole purpose of the trip!

“Wait! Jabba The Hutt attend fancy affairs like cotillions? But I thought he was an apish, small-minded thug who only took pleasure in terrorizing those who can’t defend themselves or owe him some paltry sum of money.”

Wrong! Jabba has attended many well-healed events including galas, balls and even local chamber of commerce after-hours mixers. Why? Because Jabbat The Hutt is a classy, complex and distinguished Hutt with a wide range of interests. He is just as comfortable shaking down petty smugglers and Applebee’s dishwashers for pocket change as he is getting dressed up for a night of karaoke at the local International House of Pancakes.

Anyhow, my doctor has encouraged me to limit my picks this week. He says it is causing me unnecessary stress. So, this week I’m offering up one pick. But I consider this Jabba’s stone-cold lock of the season. If you were ever going to wager on one of my picks, I encourage you to do so this week…

Indianapolis Colts at Green Bay Packers

Green Bay’s offense has looked much-improved in the past two games. If the Packers can keep this up, they should be in great shape to win the division. The Colts’ defense has struggled and those struggles should continue at Lambeau Field on Sunday. Expect Rodgers and Company to keep rolling at home and put away the Colts early.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movies films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the Fall watching football and eating 100 Grand candy bars.

Progress! For those of you have have written to me to ask about my on-going litigation with the Pizza Hut pizza company, this was a big week for me. I drafted a very strong, yet professional letter to the manager of my local Pizza Hut as I continue to implore them to change their name to avoid further postal service confusion. I have included a copy of the letter at the end of this article for your review. I think this very frustrating chapter of my life may finally be coming to a close (fingers crossed!).

Speaking of coming to a close (“What’s that? Jabba The Hutt can seamlessly seque from one topic to another? But, he’s just some bloated, globular creature without a brain!!” Wrong! I’m a complex, happy-go-lucky dude who is just a comfortable playing World of Warcraft until 4 a.m. as I am playing Call of Duty on the xBox until 2:30 in the morning)…wait. I forgot where I was.

Oh! Yes. Speaking of coming to a close, Jabba is now .500 on his picks for the season. This is turning into a really great week for me.

Here are your sure-fire picks of the week…

Pittsburgh Steelers at Miami Dolphins

The game against Philadelphia seems to be a distant memory at this point as the Steelers continue to look like the Super Bowl contender we expected at the start of the season. Miami, on the other hand, continues to be a mess. The dynamic Pittsburgh offense gets in the end zone early and often in this contest as Jabba is going with the road team for the big win.

PITTSBURGH 30 MIAMI 13

San Francisco 49ers at Buffalo Bills

The 49ers made a very unsurprising move this week by naming Colin Kaepernick the starter for this week’s game against the suddenly hot Buffalo Bills. Kaepernick would seem to be the perfect quarterback for Chip Kelly’s offense, but so many questions remain. Like, how do you spell Kaepernick? Ha ha ha, ho ho ho. “What is this? Jabba has a sense of humor?” Yes! I love to laugh. I actually own the entire library of Law & Order TV shows, including all the spin-offs. So…I like Buffalo to continue their hot streak and win at home.

BUFFALO 27 SAN FRANCISCO 17

Atlanta Falcons at Seattle Seahawks

Two really good teams. Offense versus defense. Loud stadium. Mentor versus protege. Dan Quinn, in his second year as Falcons’ coach is building something special in Atlanta. Just like his former boss, the guy who coaches the Seahawks, has built in Seattle. I’m still concerned with Seattle’s offense and their ability to be consistently effective. I like Atlanta to finish their brutal two-game road trip with a win over the Seahawks.

ATLANTA 20 SEATTLE 16

Dallas Cowboys at Green Bay Packers

This will be the Cowboys’ first trip to Lambeau Field since the infamous “no-catch” call in the playoffs a couple years ago. While Green Bay has struggled to get their offense humming this season, their defense has been solid. Same with the Cowboys. The difference in this game will be Aaron Rodgers versus the (impressive) rookie Dak Prescott. Rodgers will make just enough plays to help the Packers pull this game out on a late field goal.

GREEN BAY 24 DALLAS 22

And now, for those of you who have been following by battle with Pizza Hut pizza company, I wanted to share with you the strongly-worded letter I sent to Pizza Hut pizza company this week. I think this give you an idea of what I’ve been dealing with.

Ms. Bambi Guererro

Manager

Pizza Hut Pizza Company Chain

21342 Saint Andrews Blvd. #250

Boca Raton, FL 33433

Dear Pizza Hut Person,

I am writing you a letter because I’m getting pretty angry about the fact that the United States Postal Service continues to mix up our mail. I get a shit-ton of your mail each week and I’m guessing you get a lot of mine. LOL!

By the way, are you a girl or a boy? You’re name is Bambi, which seems like a girl’s name, but in the movie “Bambi”, Bambi was a boy. I guess it doesn’t really matter, just curious. Jabba’s getting off track! Ha ha ha ho ho ho!

This mail mix up may not be a big deal to you, but it is to me. I recently missed an important invoice from a vendor, which made me late on my payment. Now I have to pay for all merchandise up front!

I would like to suggest you consider changing the name of your business. I would change my name, but my legal, birth-given name is Jabba The Hutt. Seems odd I would have to make that kind of sacrifice as I am a real-life person and you are a company.

To help you with this process, I’ve included some suggestions below. At this point, we’re just spit-balling some ideas. I’m sure your fancy marketing people can workshop these a bit to fine tune them. It’s just a jumping off point, but I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by what you see…

– Pizza House

-The Pizza House

-Pizza Garage (a personal favorite of mine)

-Pizza Tub

-Pizza Fort

-Fort Pizza (kind of a ‘switch-em-up’ on the last one)

-The Pizza Club

-Business That Sells Pizza

-Small Grass Dwelling Pizza Place (maintains essence of “hut”)

-Pizza Office

– Boba’s Pizza Palace (let that asshole deal with some of the mail issues I’ve been living with! LOL!!)

Again, these are just suggestions. Any name change will do as long as you remove the word “Hut” from yourname. I appreciate you taking this into consideration and wait patiently for your reply.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movies films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the Fall watching football and eating deep fried calamari.

I have received a lot of emails this week from readers who expressed empathy regarding my traumatic experience in the Chili’s restroom a couple weeks ago. Apparently I’m not the only person who has found himself in such a predicament. One reader told me of a website/petition designed to bring attention to this matter and force Chili’s to double the size of their restrooms. If you’re interested in supporting this worthwhile effort, please visit http://www.myassgotstuckinachilisbathroomformultipledayspleaseexpandthesizeofyourrestroomsasap.com.

“What?! Jabba The Hutt is an activist who cares about his community so much he took the time to paste a link into his weekly column?” Yes, he did. I’m not all about illegal and illicit activities. I’m just a completely normal dude who is as comfortable eating Kit Kat candy bars and watching “Dancing With The Stars” as he is drinking a Fanta soda and eating nachos while eating Spaghetti Carbonara. Get over it.

Here are your sure-fire picks of the week…

Chicago Bears at Indianapolis Colts

Neither team is off to the start they were hoping for but you get a good quarterback playing at home against a porous defense, you know I’m going to jump all over that action. Andrew Luck is going to throw for 300+ yards and three touchdowns as the Colts roll against what may arguably be the worst team in the NFL this season.

INDIANAPOLIS 30 CHICAGO 16

I had some guests over to watch the NFL football games at my palace last week. I felt a little unprepared to host company but still wanted to do the right thing and provide refreshments for my guests. I set out a plate of Oreo cookies. Okay, no problem there. But, for some reason that I can’t explain, when a guest commented on the cookies, I told him they were homemade. Soon, everyone at the party was raving about my homemade Oreo cookies. I felt kind of bad about it. Now, everyone wants the recipe. If you have a good recipe for homemade Oreo cookies, please send it to me.

New England Patriots at Cleveland Browns

The Patriots managed to survive the Brady-less start to the season by compiling a 3 – 1 record. And now, one of the best quarterbacks in the history of the NFL returns. On the road. In Cleveland. With a chip on his shoulder. Brady will play the rest of the season like he has something to prove. I pity the Browns this week.

NEW ENGLAND 34 THE CLEVE 17

Also during last week’s viewing party at my palace, a guest approached me during the afternoon games and told me they had a headache. I retrieved some Ibuprofen and gave them a couple. I told them to take them to relieve the headache. They asked me if it would work. For some unexplained reason I told them “they should work, I made that batch myself.” Sure enough, by the end of the day, everyone at the party was asking about my homemade Ibuprofen. I’m not sure why I felt a compulsion to lie about this. Again, if you happen to have an old family recipe lying around for Ibuprofen, please send it my way.

Atlanta Falcons at Denver Broncos

The league’s hottest offense faces the league’s toughest defense. As much as people enjoy high-flying offense and think it is somehow the key to winning, the defending Super Bowl champions know otherwise. Defense trumps offense almost every time. This will be no different. Denver’s offense might not be much to write about, but their high-pressure defense will give Matt Ryan fits all day as Denver moves to 5 – 0.

DENVER 22 ATLANTA 20

I’m not sure why I sometimes feel the need to lie to people about my accomplishments. My therapist says it’s a result of an overwhelming need to be liked and impress people. “What’s that?! Jabba The Hutt has insecurities about being liked? But I thought he was just a large, blob-like creature who fed his enemies to his pet sarlacc at the Great Pit of Carkoon?” Wrong! Well, technically, that last part is correct. But most of the time, I’m just this fun, spontaneous, normal guy who likes trying on gloves at the mall or getting Slurpees on a hot summer day and hanging at Radio Shack for an afternoon.

But the worst part about last week’s NFL viewing party came during the Sunday night game. Several guests commented on the quality of my giant 90″ HD TV and how they didn’t recall seeing such a clear, vivid image before. For some reason that I still don’t understand, I mentioned that I made the TV myself. From scratch. From some odds and ends lying around my palace. It’s all people could talk about the rest of the evening. How impressed they were at Jabba’s homemade HD TV. A few of them asked me if I could make one for them. So, if you have instructions on how to make a 90″ HD TV from scrap material that might be found at a large palace, please email to me.

And now for my final pick of the week…

San Diego Chargers at Oakland Raiders

Don’t look now but the Oakland Raiders appear to be serious playoff contenders. Not that this is a big surprise as many experts picked the Raiders as a team to watch this season. Their young core of players on both sides of the ball are living up to expectations. San Diego continues to find ways to lose. This game will not be any different. The home team wins and the Raiders will find themselves at 4 – 1 after five weeks.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movies films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the Fall watching football and eating chicken wings.

People have asked “why no picks last week Jabba the Hutt?” Well, Jabba was “indisposed”. I’d like to leave it at that for now. The only other thing I will add is the federal government should really look into the regulations and codes regarding proper sizing of Chili’s Restaurant’s restrooms, urinals and doors. But I’m not going to say anything else. I’m just glad to be back.

Here are your sure-fire picks of the week…

Oakland Raiders at Baltimore Ravens

Both teams are off to better-than-expected starts this season. Because Baltimore is at home and because west-coast teams seem to struggle with 10 a.m. east coast start times, I’m going with the home team. Joe Flacco is my boy. We once spent a crazy weekend together (along with R2-D2) in Cabo. Flacco can drink!

“Oh but wait! Jabba the Hutt enjoys vacationing in exotic North American resort destinations like regular people?”

Yes, he does! You know why? Cause I’m completely and totally just a regular dude. I’m cool chilling with a box of Cheez-Its and Mountain Dew or going to the beach and eating Cheetos and drinking Sprite. I’m just a normal dude.

BALTIMORE 22 OAKLAND 21

Kansas City Chiefs at Pittsburgh Steelers

Here we go. The season is early but already Jabba suspects this game could have playoff implications down the road. Pittsburgh is going to try to bounce back after a poor showing in Philadelphia. But did you know, the Steelers are 47-0 coming off a loss on the road to NFC opponents since 1985? I like the Steelers here. Big game for Big Ben and company.

Who decides how large public restrooms in a Chili’s should be? Is that the health inspector? Civil engineers? The mayor? You’d think they would consider how easy it is to potentially be pinned inside and unable to turn around to the face the door. I mean, don’t you think that would be a natural thing to consider when building it? Like, “Hmmm…let me see…I can walk in, but what if I couldn’t turn around and can’t walk out because I cannot access the door knob?” That could be a problem, don’t you think? It has to happen more than what is reported in the news.

PITTSBURGH 34 KANSAS CITY 24

Dallas Cowboys at San Francisco 49ers

Remember when this game would have been a huge showdown of NFC-title contenders? Me either! Hahaha all over the place. Jabba is not above making witty comments for a few cheap laughs. “What?! Jabba likes to make jokes sometimes and isn’t always serious and only interested in having his hired henchmen track down deadbeat smugglers all over the galaxy?” Yes, douche bag. I do like to make funny remarks sometimes.

I think this game is closer than many expect. I’m going with the home team here although Dallas looked good last week and San Francisco looked terrible. But this is the NFL.

SAN FRANCISCO 26 DALLAS 18

You would think they would build in some emergency supplies in Chili’s bathrooms. Right? How hard would it be to stock a small cabinet with some Doritos, string cheese or even some cottage cheese for crying out loud? One thing I learned from my little ordeal last week is this; an average Hutt can live at least three days and 14 hours stuck in a Chili’s restroom. What I don’t know and am glad I didn’t have to learn is whether a Hutt can survive 3 days and 15 hours. Time for my final pick of the week.

New York Giants at Minnesota Vikings

A person could argue that through the first three games of the season, Minnesota has played as well as anyone in the league. They are my early season pick to make it to the Super Bowl. And considering they already have wins over Green Bay and Carolina, tie-breakers for home-field advantage are falling into place nicely for the Vikings. Even after losing their quarterback and pro-bowl running back, the Vikings are rolling right along. They keep rolling in week 4.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movies films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the Fall watching football and eating chicken wings.

Last week was not kind to Jabba The Hutt. For the record, I’m totally cool with people just calling me “Jabba”. Adding “The Hutt” seems a big formal and even, dare I say, tedious? See? I really am just this totally chill, laid back dude.

So, it’s time for Jabba to get well this week. Here are your sure-fire picks of the week…

Kansas City Chiefs at Houston Texans

Both teams looked pretty good at times last week. I’m going with the home team in this one because I think the teams are evenly matched and if that’s the case, Jabba always goes with the home team.

HOUSTON 23 KANSAS CITY 21

Last Tuesday I had coffee with my friend Amanaman at this cozy, fun little coffee shop in the Modarian System. “What?!! Jabba The Hutt has coffee with friends at cozy, fun little coffee shops???!!!” Yes, he does. Because he is a low-key, down-to-earth kind of guy. Just a regular dude who is just as comfortable snapping towels in the locker room as he is sipping craft beers on a yacht. He’s not an ogre, douchebag.

New Orleans Saints at New York Giants

Two powerful offenses and two questionable defenses. Jabba smells high-scoring affair! Although, that could just be Hermi Odle I smell. Haha! Hoho! Jabba is kidding about that, but you know what I mean!

I think the Giants defense has improved and that will be enough to pull out the victory and go to 2 – 0.

NEW YORK 39 NEW ORLEANS 34

Have I ever told you guys about my on-going legal dispute with Pizza Hut? I may not have time to go into it completely here, but…let’s just say it’s getting ugly. For nearly 35 years I’ve been getting their mail and they have been getting mine. I make one simple request for them to change their name and they refuse! I even gave them some cool suggestions. Like, “Pizza Garage”, “Pizza Yurt”, “Pizza Industrial Complex” and many, many more. They are a bunch of assholes. But, I digress…

Dallas Cowboys at Washington Redskins

Both teams struggled last week. I think the rookie Elliott goes for big yards on the ground, but it won’t be enough to beat an underwhelming, yet talented, Washington squad looking to make amends for their Monday night performance.

WASHINGTON 20 DALLAS 16

Of course Pizza Hut said I should have to change MY name! My LEGAL name. I was born with that name. They made their name up to sell a few pizzas. And technically, they aren’t even a hut. Most of their franchises are in strip malls or small, modular buildings. Have these motherfuckers ever seen a hut? How about “Pizza Small, Non-Descript Building”? At least that’s more accurate.

Anyways, I have to go to court next week because we’re filing a new injunction. “Oh, wait a second! Jabba The Hutt knows big fancy legal words like ‘injunction’?” Yes he does! Like why would that even be a surprise? I’ve got my shit together. Jabba The Hutt is a cool, laid-back dude that has his shit together. Alright, my last pick for the week…

Green Bay Packers at Minnesota Vikings

Both teams survived close games against less-talented AFC South teams on the road last week. Vikings got a lot of help from their defense. Aaron Rodgers doesn’t make a lot of mistakes. Close game will come down to final play, but I like the road team in this one.

I’m Jabba The Hutt. I am not Terry Bradshaw. You may know me best for my appearance in several Star Wars Movies films. But my friends know me as basically a chilled-out dude who enjoys spending a Sunday in the fall watching football and eating chicken wings.

Over the years I’ve had some success at accurately picking winners. Like, I’m really, really good at it. So, I’ve decided to start sharing my predictions. I’m grateful to the Town of Coma News for finding some value in offering this to their readers.

Here are my picks for week 1.

Carolina Panthers at Denver Broncos

I like the Panthers to get some revenge and put heavy pressure on the young Broncos’ signal caller. Look for the Panthers to run it up late.

CAROLINA 30 DENVER 13

Before I go any further, I want to address something. It is something that has been bothering me for some time now. I initially submitted this recurring feature to more than 200 news outlets. I thought for sure at least one of them would be like “OMG, YES! We want to be in the Jabba The Hutt Predicts Football Games Business.”

But none of them were interested. They said they were shocked at how juxtaposed my writing was from the colorful character I displayed in the The Star Wars Motion Picture Films.

They wanted me to “ham it up” as it were like a Terry Bradshaw. To be someone I’m not. In real life, I’m not some flashy, fast-talking warlord. I’m a pretty easy-going guy. I’m even on Pinterest. So, you know…I have a wide variety of interests.

Sorry. I had to express myself. Back to my picks…

Minnesota Vikings at Tennessee Titans

Minnesota is still reeling from the loss of their young franchise quarterback. Sean Hill looks like a nice guy with great abs, but I’m going with the home team here who has their own young franchise quarterback.

TENNESSEE 26 MINNESOTA 16

I mean, and again, this is another aside…but, do people expect me to belch and burp all the time? Am I supposed to make Rancor references or talk about how bad Gamorreans smell after a long day in the desert? (they do wear a ridiculous amount of clothing for such a warm climate)

Guess what? Jabba The Hutt is a regular dude. He likes eating Doritos with his Mt. Few and…hitchhiking. I carry around a switchblade like everyone else. So why should my column be any different? It’s hella frustrating.

Green Bay Packers at Jacksonville Jaguars

Jacksonville is going to the playoffs this season. Write that one down. Their march toward the playoffs begins with a win at home over the Green Bay Packers. A much-improved defense is the difference this year for a young Jaguars team.

JACKSONVILLE 27 GREEN BAY 21

I think what people really want is genuine Jabba The Hutt. Not phony Jabba The Hutt.

I understand that once people meet me in person they are a little taken aback by my tone and personality. I always hear “you’re not at all what I expected.”

Well guess what? I’m just being myself. All the time. Sorry if my reality is too much for you to handle media. I even buy lottery tickets! I mean, how much more normal can a guy be? And I grew a moustache for Movember last year. “Oh, why would you do that? You’re Jabba The Hutt?”

BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT MEN’S PROSTATE HEALTH!!!

I wore pink for breast cancer awareness month because just like any other 2000 pound man I really believe boobs are special.

Some say this is a sneak peek at Super Bowl LI. I say it just might be. No Brady? No problem for the Patriots, who strike early and often to earn an impressive road win against one of the NFC’s top teams.