I didn’t think last month’s review was going to be particularly good, but it turned out better than expected. This month, however, I know is going to be ugly. I can (and will) make lots of excuses for myself under the heading of “extenuating circumstances,” but the point is to improve month-over-month, not regress wildly. Yay.

Read every day. Well, I’m off to a good start anyway. I have room for improvement, though, in that it would be great if I picked up Team of Rivals more than once a month. At the very least I would like to get out of chapter two before, say, Easter.

Blog every day. Okay, I’m two-for-two. Once again, I have to thank God for the WordPress iPad app because if it weren’t for the app extenuating circumstances would’ve come into play.

Exercise every day. And this is where everything collapses down around my ears. Extenuating circumstances don’t really come into play here, either, because I stopped exercising long before I got sick.

Brush my teeth twice every day. Extenuating circumstances only go so far with this one, too. I’m good about brushing my teeth when I’m home, but when I’m not home it all goes to hell. I wish I knew why, but I don’t.

Stop drinking soda. I’ve been good with this one and I don’t even have to resort to extenuating circumstances. I thought about buying ginger ale when I was sick, but that would’ve meant getting dressed and leaving the house and it just felt like too much work; much easier to stay on the couch watching movies and baseball.

Break out of my comfort zone. I did some things outside of my comfort zone (applying for a job being the biggest), but not really enough. This month was an improvement over last month, though.

Okay, that’s better than I thought it’d be. But it’s still pretty ugly. Especially since “extenuating circumstances” don’t help as much as I’d thought they would.

Obviously, the best part of February for me was the start of Spring Training games. But here’s a non-baseball thought that’s been bouncing around in my head for the past few days: while I was sick I got an email from Brand New about a sale in their online store. (It’s actually good that I didn’t see the email until after the sale ended because otherwise I’d have stressed myself out trying to rationalize buying a bunch of shirts that I don’t need and can’t afford.) But why is Brand New even having a sale in their online store? I’ve seen other bands have online merch sales, but never Brand New. So why do it now? Are they trying to clear some inventory to make room for new stuff? Stuff like, say, a new record, a Deja Entendu (vinyl) re-release, and/or the new merch designs that go along with a new tour? (Please, please, please let it be “all of the above.”) Maybe it’s not smart, but I have to read between the lines of this random sale. I have to. And it presages good things.

I suppose that sounds a bit melodramatic because it’s not like I was dying or anything, but whatever.

First, I owe Puffs Plus an apology. I once complained about only having Puffs Plus in the house, but it turns out Puffs Plus are really good tissues to have when you’re blowing your nose a lot. I used so many tissues while sick that I filled my office trashcan and yet my nose was never red or raw or sore. That was awesome.

I think this other one is really specific (to me), but I’m gonna say it anyway: I fear showering when I’m sick. I think normal people like to shower while sick because who wants to feel dirty on top of feeling sick? Not me. And yet I avoid showering when my nose is stuffed up. (And this is where it gets very specific to me.) Have you ever experienced something like heat exhaustion in the shower? It happens to me a lot. If the shower gets too steamy I start to feel nauseous and light-headed, I get a headache, and I generally feel like I’m going to die. It isn’t fun. And that can happen on a good day. So imagine how much worse it can be on days when I can’t breathe properly even before the hot water starts flowing. The point of this is that I had to convince myself to take a shower this morning even though I felt gross (as in dirty). I made it through the shower without any real problems, too, so I was able to face the day fresh and clean for the first time since I got sick. I think it had a positive impact on my day, too 🙂

Are decongestants supposed to make it feel like all the mucus in your body is concentrated in your nose? ‘Cause that’s pretty much how I felt before I took the decongestant and I thought the drug was supposed to make me feel better, not the same. At this point it looks like I can look forward to another night of sleeping with my mouth open because I can’t breathe through my nose and waking up with a super dry mouth and a sore throat. Yay.

Although if I actually sleep tonight it will be a vast improvement over last night. I went to bed at a decent hour (for me) because I was tired but I ended up hearing almost all of Emma because I kept having coughing fits. I have no idea how much sleep I got last night, but after the coughing subsided I tossed and turned my way through Pride and Prejudice, The Princess Diaries 2, and The Avengers. Man, I hope I sleep tonight.

I’m really tired of being unemployed; if I could snap my fingers and be gainfully employed in Philadelphia tomorrow, I would. I don’t particularly want to be sick right now, either. But you know what? Dwelling on how much those two things suck isn’t going to help. And besides, it’s not all bad.

For instance, if I were to be gainfully employed tomorrow, I would be unable to watch the Phillies play the Yankees since Spring Training games have an annoying habit of starting at 1 PM. And it would make me sad to have to miss Spring Training games.

Furthermore, if I had a job I wouldn’t be able to spend all day on the couch. Nor would I be able to sleep in. Job-having people have to do things even if resting is more conducive to healing.

So you see, being unemployed has its perks. And this is kind of the best possible time for me to get sick.

If my Twitter timeline is any indication, I am the only person in the United States not watching the Oscars. I saw very few nominated movies this year and it’s hard for me to care about the Oscars in general if there isn’t at least one nominee I’m emotionally invested in. Also, I couldn’t care less about Seth MacFarlane.

The strangest thing in my timeline was the Anne Hathaway hatred. What is that about? When did Anne Hathaway become Zooey Deschanel? I love Anne Hathaway (and Zooey Deschanel). I really don’t understand it. Also, as far as I could tell, people were hating on her for having emotions. And yet those same people were hating on Kristen Stewart for not having any emotions. You can’t have it both ways, snarky Internet people.

The Phillies played an honest-to-God baseball game today, you guys. And I know because I watched it. Even after it got a bit ridiculous and the substitutions made me say “wait, who’s that guy and where did he come from?” or “that guy is still on the team?” I kept watching. After all, I’ve been waiting for this forever. And it really was the only reason I got out of bed, so I thought I should make the most of it. I really wish I knew why my Apple TV didn’t know about any of today’s games, but it’s not the end of the world because my iPad knew about them.

I decided I should write this now, while I still have some post-baseball energy. And since I’m starting to fade I think that was a very good decision on my part 🙂

Now it’s time to take some more Tylenol and watch some movies that I don’t mind falling asleep during. My life sure is exciting.

You guys already know about BuzzFeed, right? It’s the best. But also dangerous because it’s easy to lose track of time when you jump from one page to another. So don’t say I didn’t warn you 🙂

Today’s list is longer than usual because I just don’t want to pare it down. And I’m not even sure I’d want to if I weren’t low on energy thanks to my super-fun cold.

In the Wawa-is-in-the-zeitgeist category, we have 22 reasons why Wawa is the greatest gas station on the planet. (A couple of quick notes, though. One, it’s hilarious to me that Emma Stone is eating Turkey Hill ice cream in that GIF. See, Turkey Hill is another Pennsylvania dairy turned convenience store. Turkey Hill ice cream is pretty amazing, though. Two, of course Johnny Knoxville has a Wawa tattoo. He knows what’s up. Remember, half the dudes from Jackass are from West Chester, PA. Knoxville isn’t, but he’s spent a lot of time in the area shooting the show and movies. And three, I find the characterization of the Wawa Welcome America Festival as a “freedom festival” odd. The Welcome America Festival is Philly’s big Fourth of July shindig. Sunoco used to hold the naming rights, but now Wawa does.)

In the I-want-to-go-to-there category, we have the 30 best places to be if you love books. Who knew there was such a thing as an abandoned Wal-Mart? I’m building a scenario in my mind wherein the residents of the town realized how evil Wal-Mart is and rose up against it. In reality, though, they probably just built a Super Wal-Mart in the next town and it stole all the customers. (Which is sad, but also kinda funny. I mean, Wal-Mart falling victim to Wal-Mart. Funny.)

In the thanks-for-making-me-feel-old category, we have 15 things that happened 15 years ago. I had no idea that Google was founded the year I graduated from high school. I don’t think I heard of it until I was, like, a junior in college. Also, yep, I graduated from high school 15 years ago.

In the adorable-animals-make-everything-better category, we have videos of animals that adopt other animals. The puppy that was adopted by a cat is just the cutest thing ever.

And now I really need to go to bed. Have I mentioned how much I do not enjoy being sick?