next story

7 Guys You Should Never Date (Seriously)

My friend is dating a guy who is bad news. It makes me cringe to hear about him. And while it’s fine if you just want to have a fling, it's not a recipe for long-term happiness. I never put up with crappy behavior—it's a waste of my time—and I especially wouldn’t get into a relationship with any of the tools I’ve outlined below. Read on to find out which guys you should never date.

1. The loafer-dreamer. It’s fine if a guy is unemployed. That's pretty common these days. But is he at least looking? Don’t nag, but do ask. You may be the breadwinner in the relationship, which is great, but will he pull his weight with other ventures, like planning dates? Or will everything always be on you? Don’t date a guy you’re going to resent one day.

2. The negative Ned. Some guys are glass-is-half-empty people, which is fine. But shouldn’t a guy feel a little more positive than normal around a woman he wants to impress? If your guy doesn’t make an effort to at least look on the plus side, he will probably end up bringing you down. Doesn’t matter if you’re Pollyanna. If a guy finds fault in everything, run.

3. The egomaniac. It’s his world and you just live in it. Which means you hang with his friends, visit his family, and in general, he has very little time for you. The narcissist may not honor his commitments to you if an invitation comes for something that will flatter him or make him feel bigger. A self-centered guy will rarely center his attention on you. And I don’t care how good it feels on the rare occasion that he does glance your way.

If his opening line to you is, “I started a hedge fund at age 25,” respond with, “Your trophy’s in the mail.”

4. Dude with a ‘tude. Do you really want a bad boy? He’s going to be anti-establishment about everything, including taking out the trash. That’s immature. And he’ll give you attitude. It’s not productive. In the end, every woman wants a guy who is helpful and takes out the trash.

5. The chronic flirt. If you’re enamored because he’s the lead in a band, or he’s a pro skater, you might explain away his behavior. You don’t love that he flirts, but it’s good for his career? No. Look for a guy whose music is so good, it stands on his own and he doesn’t need to flirt to get fans.

6. The mama’s boy. There are a lot of these out there, so I’ll be careful with this one. I’m just going to say this: even if his choice is between going to Disneyland with you and helping his mom do her laundry, he will probably choose the laundry. It’s no fun when you’re always #2.

7. The addictive personality. He could be predisposed to be addicted to drugs, gambling, alcohol, exercise, shopping, or even you. He’ll grow psychologically dependent on whatever it is. If he is addicted, he will be so preoccupied, that it gets in the way of normal life and dating you. It will be draining on you, even though it’s not your addiction. Go cold turkey on this guy.

Who have I forgotten? Which one was I wrong about? There are always exceptions out there. Do you have a horror story about any of the guys above?