Wednesday, April 3, 2013

I have been reading a lot lately. That is not an earth-shattering revelation, I realize. I have been reading a lot about my faith and history and politics (OK just a little here) and religion in general, the Bible, family history all kinds of things really. I felt like I need a kick in the grow-up-improve-yourself-learn-more-about-the world you live in and what you believe pants. I got tired of trying to find the hyphen key (you know how I hate that key.) I also think I have just been away from education too long. I loved college and loved teaching (not necessarily BEING a teacher, just the actual teaching part which is about 20% of the job.)

So you know how it is when you get to reading this kind of stuff and you think, I should be doing that! or why am I not good at that? And then you're like- crap I stink at everything I have ever done, said or attempted to do or say and I need to just scrap my whole personality and start over. . . such is the dangers of the Internet, pinterest, books, etc. Deep breath.

I read people's blogs with their flowery articulate prose and think . . . I say things like crap on my blog, no one is ever going to accuse me of being a literary genius. Still, I have something to offer its just written in more of a layman's style. So I was thinking about prayer and how I always pray but my prayers are like those little annoying ketchup packets - I just tear and squirt over and over all day. Pretty shallow shout outs to the Almighty about whatever is on my frontal lobe at the moment. No time for depth. I can't wax poetic to the creator of the universe for several reasons :

1. Nothing I say is going to impress him as far as beautiful language goes - remember he made well, everything so seriously, He is not impressed by big words.

2. I am beginning to think my daughter inherited her ADD from me - I can't keep one train of thought for more than a few seconds. I can't cross a room with one task in mind without detouring at the first sight of another task and then arrive on other side of room with it still in my brain. Now, what was I saying?

3. He already knows what I am thinking so I don't want to bore Him with redundancy. Yes that makes me thoughtful doesn't it? I know some of you keep a prayer list and we tend to ask about the same things over and over so I tend to say "Refer to list - thanks Amen" if I am in a super hurry.

SIDE NOTE: Don't you moms agree that the invention of those new super-sized ketchup packets at places like CFA are a God-send? No pun intended. You know what I mean if you have small children who like healthy things like french fries - no I never would feed my babies such a thing ahem. I meant all you who do let your kids eat them and they aren't able to get the packets torn with their chubby small fingers so you have to do it like 15 times before you can eat your own fries which are now cold and soggy (but you eat them anyway for some weird reason.) The big packets are the BOMB!

I guess my point in all this rambling is to encourage you, myself and anyone who has ever wondered about praying or felt guilty for not praying enough or with the right words. He doesn't even need words, just a nod in his direction, just an acknowledgement of His greatness and your feebleness, just a connection that lets you both know that your relationship is important and your connection is still there. I hate to admit this but sometimes when things are going weirdly wrong , which they often do at this house, I just turn my eyes up and say "seriously?" I think that is a prayer that might give Him a chuckle. I have to believe the Lord has the best sense of humor of all.