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How to Make Room for God...

That's my latest challenge now that I'm leaving my job (and yesterday's post, below). I have an endless summer of Sabbath to discern what God has planned for me in this next chapter of my life.

I was afraid that, left to my own devices, I would fritter away my days surfing the net, watching tv, or playing Civilization IV.

So I made a schedule. A schedule, as soon as I finished reading it, I saw was unkeepable. I mean look at it...

It has footnotes and everything!

Those footnotes are lists of different ways of being attentive to God, things that I would do if I were away on retreat. (Incidentally if you can read the fine print at the bottom, "coursework" refers to the Inner Excavate-along that I talked about here, followed by Christine ValtersPaintner's "The Artist's Rule of Life".)

OK, I told myself, this is just a guideline, that when I'm aimlessly wandering the house, or flicking through channels, this is where I will come to see what it is I am supposed to be doing.

And then I read Jennifer Lee's post about her toe-ring. It's a beautiful, beautiful post about we who are broken, we who make plans and where God is in all that. (picture below used with her permission)

Who was planning this summer? Me or God? So far, I'd made it clear that I didn't trust myself -- or God -- to find the time from Him to speak. I am pretty sure that God needs all the help He can get to capture my attention. {/sarcasm}

I think that's why retreats work so well in creating space to spend time with God, because all other distractions are gone.

The important thing is, I hope, is my attentiveness to God. Thanks to Ann Voskamp's "1,000 Gifts" I have learned a lot about being attentive this year and continue to learn through practicing it. God speaks to me in so many different ways, whereas once upon a time, God had to deliver good "clue by four" to get my attention.

I don't want to waste my time this summer with a myriad of distractions, and I don't want to crowd God out with planned activities. So like they say in a certain movie about pirates, my schedule's just a guideline. I hereby promise it won't be rigidly adhered to, that there will be space for having fun in the park, at the museum, reading all day or just sitting at Jesus' feet.

Hmm. I guess the way I would say I pay attention to Him during my day is that I spend time singing [in my head, if nothing else] and worshiping. He's on my heart and mind much of the time, even when I'm doing junky stuff that's necessary. Couldn't make it w/o Him day by day, moment by moment. I ain't perfect, believe me, but He is, and I'm trying to trust and rely on Him instead of myself. And, I'll try until I make it to heaven.