Lions Gate via Everett Collection
When we last left our heroes, they had conquered all opponents in the 74th Annual Hunger Games, returned home to their newly refurbished living quarters in District 12, and fallen haplessly to the cannibalism of PTSD. And now we're back! Hitching our wagons once again to laconic Katniss Everdeen and her sweet-natured, just-for-the-camera boyfriend Peeta Mellark as they gear up for a second go at the Capitol's killing fields.
But hold your horses — there's a good hour and a half before we step back into the arena. However, the time spent with Katniss and Peeta before the announcement that they'll be competing again for the ceremonial Quarter Quell does not drag. In fact, it's got some of the film franchise's most interesting commentary about celebrity, reality television, and the media so far, well outweighing the merit of The Hunger Games' satire on the subject matter by having Katniss struggle with her responsibilities as Panem's idol. Does she abide by the command of status quo, delighting in the public's applause for her and keeping them complacently saturated with her smiles and curtsies? Or does Katniss hold three fingers high in opposition to the machine into which she has been thrown? It's a quarrel that the real Jennifer Lawrence would handle with a castigation of the media and a joke about sandwiches, or something... but her stakes are, admittedly, much lower. Harvey Weinstein isn't threatening to kill her secret boyfriend.
Through this chapter, Katniss also grapples with a more personal warfare: her devotion to Gale (despite her inability to commit to the idea of love) and her family, her complicated, moralistic affection for Peeta, her remorse over losing Rue, and her agonizing desire to flee the eye of the public and the Capitol. Oftentimes, Katniss' depression and guilty conscience transcends the bounds of sappy. Her soap opera scenes with a soot-covered Gale really push the limits, saved if only by the undeniable grace and charisma of star Lawrence at every step along the way of this film. So it's sappy, but never too sappy.
In fact, Catching Fire is a masterpiece of pushing limits as far as they'll extend before the point of diminishing returns. Director Francis Lawrence maintains an ambiance that lends to emotional investment but never imposes too much realism as to drip into territories of grit. All of Catching Fire lives in a dreamlike state, a stark contrast to Hunger Games' guttural, grimacing quality that robbed it of the life force Suzanne Collins pumped into her first novel.
Once we get to the thunderdome, our engines are effectively revved for the "fun part." Katniss, Peeta, and their array of allies and enemies traverse a nightmare course that seems perfectly suited for a videogame spin-off. At this point, we've spent just enough time with the secondary characters to grow a bit fond of them — deliberately obnoxious Finnick, jarringly provocative Johanna, offbeat geeks Beedee and Wiress — but not quite enough to dissolve the mystery surrounding any of them or their true intentions (which become more and more enigmatic as the film progresses). We only need adhere to Katniss and Peeta once tossed in the pit of doom that is the 75th Hunger Games arena, but finding real characters in the other tributes makes for a far more fun round of extreme manhunt.
But Catching Fire doesn't vie for anything particularly grand. It entertains and engages, having fun with and anchoring weight to its characters and circumstances, but stays within the expected confines of what a Hunger Games movie can be. It's a good one, but without shooting for succinctly interesting or surprising work with Katniss and her relationships or taking a stab at anything but the obvious in terms of sending up the militant tyrannical autocracy, it never even closes in on the possibility of being a great one.
3.5/5
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And then it started with a crackling sound, like someone turning a socket wrench or back pedaling a bicycle. A woman with her hand crooked into her underarm and flapping, like some sort of clockword bird that was going on the fritz. She made this sound, over and over, like a duck quacking with a lisp. It was as if her neck was going to start rising out of her body, turning her into some fleshy giraffe, like Mech-a-Neck, the coolest of all He-Man toys. But no, that did not happen. It was just a noise, it was just a gesture. It was all of Lydia Stirling McLaughlin boiled down into one goofy pose.
Yes, this is the newest cannon fodder for the Real Civil War Enactments of Bull Run Massacre State Park. This is Lydia. She comes to us by way of Heather Dubrow's friend Casey, who wants Lydia, the owner and "managing editor" of Beverly Hills Lifestyle magazine, to photograph Heather's house. Lydia lets us know, several times, that her family is very wealthy. Just how wealthy? Well, pretty loaded. She is the granddaughter of Canadian media magnate Geoff Stirling, so that's doing pretty well for herself. Well, that's doing pretty well for granddad's money. She also owns this "magazine" and a marketing firm and an art gallery. You know, rich people businesses. OH, and she has a line of luxury jewelry for dogs which is sort of like three rich people jobs combined into one. She also has a brother named Geoff Stirling Jr who was an Abercrombie model so be sure to click on that link when you're alone and in a position to unbutton your fly.
Lydia is rich and so is her husband Doug (but Googling Doug McLaughlin is sort of like trying to find a Yelp article for a restaurant called "Place," so I have no dirt on him). Lydia also must like abs because, damn, her husband is seriously hot. And he knows it! Doug is some sort of graphic designer or something, and he designs her "magazine." The first thing he does when the cameras are in their house is take off his shirt and do pull-ups in the closet door. Yes, Doug is in the closet door. Just standing there, right in the closet...door...chiseling his man body and thinking about what hair product he should use when starring on a Real Housewives franchise.
Lydia and Doug have two sons — one named Stirling, which I was going to totally pick on before I found out it was her maiden name — and one named Maverick. Oh, I am going to pick on that. I am going to pick on that so hard. You know why? I think it comes from Sarah Palin! Their son is 3, so the time frame fits. Yes, these two are all Jesus-y and they live in the OC and are rich, so they're probably Republicans and they heard Baked Alaska Crazy Pants go on and on about being a "maverick" and, at some point, she thought to herself, "Wow, that would be a really good name for my son. He will have all the wonderful qualities of Sarah Palin." Then she turned to her husband, her hand caressing her pregnant belly as she lay on the couch watching Fox News and her husband did gravity boot sit ups hanging upside-down, like Richard Gere in American Gigolo, and she proposed the idea and he said, "Sure...sssss....honey....sssss....whatever....sssss....you.....sssss....want," in between reps. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the story of how China wiped us off the face of the earth.
Lydia is also friends with Alexis Couture since they were the only young mothers in Dana Point (which is, funny enough, the name of the girl I lost my virginity to) who loved God and His Only Son Our Lord and Savior Jim Bellino, so they bonded, but they're not really friends anymore.
We're first introduced to Lydia when she comes over to Heather's house. I'm sure she's meant to be an ally for Alexis because otherwise no one would film with Alexis, but why would Lydia want to be introduced by Alexis? Because then everyone with eyes and a Christian upbringing would hate her. She goes to Heather's house to talk about being in Beverly hills Lifestyle magazine. OK, I'm sorry, Beverly Hills Lifestyle is neither headquartered in nor about Beverly Hills. It is about the spirit of being in Beverly Hills all over the world. OK, sure. Now, I guess that people outside of the five boroughs can subscribe to the New Yorker so maybe it's the same with Joyce Leslies Lifestyle? Maybe. No, I'm sorry. It's not the same. I think it's one of those free magazines that you find all dog-earned in the back of a town car you take to the airport because everyone who rides in it takes it out and goes "What the fresh hell is this stupid collection of pages?"
We've actually seen a shoot from the magazine before, when Brandi on Beverly Hills was doing that modeling shoot when Lisa picked her up on the way to Ojai. That shoot was for Beverly Clearly Literary Lifestyle magazine. Sigh, hand swat, annnnnnyyyy-way, Lydia wants Heather and Terry's giant granite quarry that they turned into a living space to be in the magazine. Heather is like, "Well, it only makes sense if I'm on the cover." Oh god. Of course Heather thinks that, and of course Terry thinks that, but really, what is the difference between being in the magazine and being on it? If you're on the cover, there is no way you can hide it. You're there, forever. You're stuck. That's sort of like saying, "I'll only be arrested if I'm on trial for murder." These are not the bargains you make.
I have to say, I'm not really keen on the Heather Dubrow of this season. Last year she was the wonderful, blunt, smart, reasonable one with the really cool kids and great husband who you wanted to be friends with. She was struggling between being a suburbanite and trying to resurrect her acting career. This season she seems to have given up all aspirations outside of the home, and she's the whiny henpecker with a no-good husband that she is always bickering with. I don't like this Heather. This is Faded Dreams Heather, who surrendered herself to being a mom and is bitter because of it. I don't want to be friends with her, I want to introduce her to Betty Draper so that I can line them up and play a game of William Tell. I would, hopefully, lose.
Speaking of people I would like to accidentally shoot in the face while aiming for an apple...Oh, hi Vicki! It's time to talk about you. Ugh, Vicki and Brooks. We have to have this fight again. Yes, we're still going around in the same old shame circle with Vicki who is in love with Brooks but no one likes him so she can't have him around even though she sneaks off into the bathroom to send him Snap Chats of her Brazilian wax all the time.
So Brianna hates Brooks – and with good reason, he's a total grifter. Everyone can see that but Vicki. Brianna is living with Vicki and paying rent, and says that she doesn't want Brooks or anyone that Vicki is dating around the house or around her son. OK, I love Brianna. I think she is the best thing about this show and the only real person on it. I also think that she should be a full-fledged Housemonster along with the other women and get to go on all the trips and have all the attendant benefits and pay of being a full-time staffer of Andy Cohen's Demon Camp. I think she would be one of the best Housewives and she's been on the show longer than anyone in any of the cities, so she's earned it.
That said, I don't know that she's right in her argument to Vicki. Now, if she was like "I don't want Brooks around because he is an awful scammer," then fine. I get that. We all get that. Everyone wants him to go and die of some brain-eating parasite in some little corner of the bayou somewhere and never be heard from again. But if it's anyone that Vicki is dating that she doesn't want around, that's bad. I know she's paying rent, but come on. What does she expect of her mother? Celibacy until she moves out? That's crazy. And if Brianna didn't make dating other men so hard, maybe that would help move Brooks out of the picture. I'm sure that this rule is targeted at Brooks specifically, but Brianna turns it to men in general so that she doesn't seem like she's piling the hate on this con man. But still, it seems crazy.
As for Vicki, she needs to give up on Brooks — but she seems not so much in love, just addicted. It's like he's some sort of heroin. Vicki can't be happy without it, her involvement with it is having bad effects on her relationships with her friends and family, she's sneaking around to get fixes of it because everyone knows its wrong, and she gets all horrible and moody and defensive when she hasn't gotten it in awhile. As Grace Jones says, "Love is a drug," and it's got Vicki grabbed tight by her weave. I mean, seriously, everyone hates this guy and he is ruining all her relationships. What is it going to take for her to give him up?
This argument isn't about Brooks at all though. No, this is about Vicki and her unabiding narcissism. That is the real thing she is addicted to, thinking about herself and drawing everyone into that netted black swarm that orbits around her. It all came out at the forgiveness dinner with Tamra.
What is amazing is that these two Gila monsters sit down for grilled fish ("Hold the potatoes!") and somehow Vicki ends up looking worse. She's trying to make up with this woman, but she says things that are completely awful. "I know you were hurt, but I was really hurt. Our friendship failed and it's not my fault." That is a direct quote. That is not Brian Moylan being lazy and paraphrasing from memory. I wrote those words down on a piece of paper because they needed to be witnessed. "I know you were hurt, but I was really hurt," Vicki Gunvalson said on this day, April 15, in the two thousand and thirteenth year of Our Lord Jim Bellino's Grapefruit. Yes, her hurt is always greater. Her hurt is always worse. Things do not transpire, they are done to her.
Objectively, we know this to be false. No one's hurt can be worse than another person's hurt. We all feel our hurts the same way. Everyone's hurt is the same. That was the original title of the REM song, but it didn't really fit with the melody. Also, the reason the friendship failed is because Tamra tried to tell Vicki the truth about her con man boyfriend and Vicki wouldn't listen. Yes, Tamra probably got all drunk and flew off into a rage and said awful things, but if Vicki had only listened to her friend, she wouldn't have gotten there to begin with. So, yes, it is Vicki's fault. It's all Vicki's fault but in order to keep drawing breaths she needs to think of herself as blameless.
When dinner was over, and they clinked their wine glasses to forgiveness, Vicki and Tamra finished up their salmon in the stilted comfort of small talk and gossip until it was time to go. Vicki got into her car and drove home, the whole way home winding through the darness and thinking about it all. Vicki has had so much change in her life lately. There's her cryogenically frozen relationship with Brooks, her daughter moving home with the baby, and Tamra casting spells on her and then disolving them by burning some sage and pulling the hair balls and evil talismans she planted in Vicki's house.
She was still thinking about it when she opened the door to the house, her keys jangling in the lock. She walked in and kicked something that was sitting on a drop cloth in the foyer. "Shit," she muttered more out of surprise than exaspiration. The construction. Just one more thing. The whole house was being rebuilt from the ground up and Vicki couldn't stand it anymore. She looked around the foyer and she hated the painting. It seemed all horrible and uneven to her. No one cares, she though. No one cares about her home like she does and, once again, she'd have to do everything herself.
She went into the next room and threw down her bag and keys on a couch covered in a sheet and threw her blazer on top of it. She went back into the foyer and opened a can of paint and poured it into the tray laying on the floor that she kicked when she walked in. She got the roller out and coated it in the eggshell coating and put it up on the wall, going back and forth frantically, in large W's like she learned on HGTV. This was the right way to do it. This was the way to fix things. She was going to make it all perfect, smoothing over her lines twice so that the walls would be just how she wanted them. She worked faster and faster, panting and wiping the sweat from her brow as the large swatches of shiny wet paint grew and grew.
"Mom," she suddenly heard behind her. It was Brianna in pajama pants and a tank top. She was crossing her arms and pulling a hoodie over her breasts in opposite directions. "What are you doing?"
"Hi, honey," Vicki said. "I'm just going to finish this wall. I'm so sick of being under construction. These contractors don't know what they're doing. It's like I'm the only one who has ever painted a wall. I'm just..."
"Mom, it's almost midnight," Brianna says. "Everyone is already asleep. And you really need to get some rest."
Follow Brian Moylan on Twitter @BrianJMoylan
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Even Vicki Gunvalson’s new facial armor can’t protect her from her apparent fate this season on The Real Housewives of Orange County. Of course we won't know exactly how b**chy things will get, because Monday night’s premiere was basically one big tease for what looks to be an explosive string of episodes. The theme, however, is consistent: Vicki is the b**ch.
After sustaining some hacky commentary from Slade during his brief and terrible reign as an open mic night stand-up comedian, Vicki is still stinging from his idea that she looks like Miss Piggy. Sure, that’s natural. Words hurt and Slade is a douche, but most people just buy themselves some new clothes and take up with a younger man for a few weeks. Vicki, however, wants something more permanent: out the doors goes her hoarse cry “my parents think I’m beautiful!” and in comes surgical procedures from Alexis Bellino’s trusted plastic surgeon-who-totally-only-does-medically-necessary-plastic-surgery-so-back-off. Vicki had fat from her rear injected into her cheeks and “cartilage reconstruction” on her nose (Vicki just say it: you had a nose job). Much like Heidi Montag before her, she claims that her face looks a little strange because she’s still swollen from surgery. Okay, sure. Just know we’ll be here all season, Vicks.
After we meet Vicki’s new face, we prepare to meet the second most important new person in her life: Briana’s baby. Mama Vicki says Briana is “huge” (thanks, mom) and “ready to pop,” and so we follow Vicki, Briana, and Briana’s boyfriend Ryan to the hospital where labor proceeds to take 18 hours and then poof (skipping past the part where labor is a b**ch) Briana has a beautiful baby boy. And Vicki has a new thing she gets to pride herself on: being a grandma.
Of course, she’ll play grandma alone because after the fallout last season over Brooks — King Rapscallion himself — Vicki thought it was best to break up. Still, she says she could go back to him because she’s “like totally handicapped without men.” (Suck it, feminism.) Which means she didn’t so much break up with him as she did prepare him to be one of the main story lines this season.
It’s something Gretchen and Tamara aren’t buying. Later, at Heather’s gala disguised as a clam bake, the cackling bookends (no literally, they are dress identically and cackle endlessly) offer up the theory that Vicki didn’t really break up with Brooks, she’s just hiding him from everyone. I don’t often like to agree with two grown women dressed in bestie matching outfits (accidentally, right), but yeah, Vicki’s probably got Brooks hidden under that pile of furniture she says is there because they’re “renovating.”
Still Tamara and Gretchen are ones to talk. Tamara is engaged to and living with Eddie in his house with his kids. We’re treated to montage of her cleaning every last inch of the house while Eddie, who only owns 49 percent of their company (compared to her 51) takes all day designing business cards. If this wasn’t a regression enough, Eddie then berates Tamara for wearing her sneakers in the house and for leaving lights on — those things are against his rules. Right, because basically when you get engaged it means you promise to boss that little lady around for the rest of your life.
Gretchen isn’t doing much better. Slade recently got a job as a radio DJ, which might be the only job he’s actually capable of, and he’s left her alone to run her own business and make her own breakfast. These are tasks Gretchen doesn’t handle well, resulting in her bothering Slade at “work” so he can tell her how to use their Keurig coffee maker, also known as coffee for dummies machine. At least she’s found some poor soul to help her run her makeup and bag business out of her living room/off of her Barbie pink laptop.
Heather is probably in the best shape of everyone, but mostly because she just does whatever the hell she wants all the time. She brings home live lobsters to test out (oh please, who doesn’t just come home for lunch with a variety of lobster for testing?) for her clambake, which she explains to her children as they look on like she’s speaking Russian. Yes, Heather, we get it, you’re an ex-actress. You could still speak like you’re not reciting lines from a school play. But the kids are onboard; it’s her husband Terry who’s trying to twist her arm to do things his way — namely, to include onion rings on the menu at their clam-less clambake. They do agree on one thing, however, as they munch on their lobster like it’s grilled cheese: they need security in case of intruders or Vicki’s loser boyfriend.
Heather won’t have to worry about Alexis, however, because she’s invited everyone except her: a truth that isn’t lost on Alexis because this is a reality show and everyone knows everyone’s business all the time. But Alexis is convinced she’s doing amazingly. She’s got a new haircut and a new house that her Real Housewife money bought, so clearly everything’s totally different. Especially the part where her husband Jim refuses to get rid of his “art” (cheesy pool hall naked lady sculpture) on the grounds that Alexis is more scantily clad than his statues are. While she should say, "my money bought this house, you lump of dough," she instead says that she will always change her clothes if he tells her to. What century is this?
But Alexis’ inability to stand up to her husband isn’t what we’re here to discuss. According to clever editing, the big concept here is bullying (and best-friend-stealing, which apparently didn’t die in grade school). Alexis thinks Tamara stole her best friend Gretchen, and that she was bullied by the other women because, as she puts it, she’s weaker, outnumbered, and will never be on the same page as them. Tamara and Gretchen, sipping champagne while making fun of all the clothes in an Orange County boutique, cackle over Alexis’ accusation. Because duh, bullying is only bullying if they physically harm that person or make them so distraught they seek out suicide, according to these geniuses. Please, no one let Gretchen have kids.
And after all that wonderful set up, it’s finally time for Heather’s party. Of course, Heather is just a pot stirrer — days before, she had delivered the news that Vicki’s daughter was in labor — something Tamara was insulted not to have heard from Vicki herself. So for the party, Heather places Tamara and Vicki across from each other, because the producers told her to. That well-placed email from Vicki to Tamara about how Eddie is going to leave Tamara sure isn’t going to come up when these ladies are using blunt instruments to crack lobsters open across from one another.
Come party time, Tamara is scared of seeing Vicki and Vicki is afraid to see everyone because she’s alone and her face is still swollen. To ensure that Tamara and Gretchen are all fired up, they somehow get their hands on a totally unstaged photo of Vicki holding onto a beam while the wind tousels her hair and they realize, hey Vicki’s face is totally different.
After Heather wins an argument with her husband over his unfulfilled wish to serve Australian lobster and onion rings (they got Maine lobster and new potatoes, boohoo), Tamara and Gretchen arrive to the “like presidential house” to beat up on Vicki before she gets there. Gretchen is worried that Vicki will “eat” her. Tamara and Gretchen start the rumor that Vicki is only pretending to be broken up with Brooks to keep everyone off her back. And the rest of the episode probably should have had a “b**ch” counter in the corner, because it pretty much only consisted of Vicki and Tamara’s talking head interviews about how much of a b**ch the other is.
Of course it all ends very maturely with them staring dramatically at each other from opposite ends of the party as prelude to any real action whatsoever, and what looks to be the season of the b**ch (and by b**ch, they mean Vicki, but I mean all of these women).
[Photo Credit: Bravo/NBCU]
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Quick — run to your nearest dumbwaiter and hold on tight, because Tony Wonder himself — also known as Ben Stiller to all you non-magical types — is set to reprise his role on the upcoming Netflix season of Arrested Development. Cue the smoke cloud! According to EW, Wonder will be back to take on his magical arch nemsis, GOB (Will Arnett) for a single episode. And while plot details are scarce, something tells us there will be tricks and illusions aplenty. To the Magic Castle! Stiller’s Tony Wonder first appeared in Season 2 of the series, and turned up again the following season. Arrested Development originally aired on Fox from 2003 to 2006.
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The list of upcoming guest stars for AD is nothing to scoff at, as Seth Rogen, Kristen Wiig, Conan O’Brien, Isla Fisher, John Slattery, Terry Crews and the boys of Workaholics are already confirmed to be taking part in what many are speculating to be the show's final season. But don't worry about the Bluth family too much: after all, there's always money in the banana stand. Hollywood.com has reached out for comment, but did not hear back at the time of publication.
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Are you excited for the return of Tony Wonder? Is it possible to be any happier about a television show's return? Let us know in the comments!
Follow Alicia on Twitter @alicialutes
[Photo Credit: FOX]
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First, let's start with the bad news: The Mayan calendar (and, more importantly, a stellar John Cusack movie) have confirmed that the world is ending in a few weeks. I know, right? And we were all totally going to lose those 15 lbs and start journaling in 2013. Then there's the even worse news: You missed a lot of really good TV in 2012. So much good, in fact, that you have no hope of catching up before the end of days. That's where we (and the good news) come in — we've rounded up the best TV spoilers of 2012, so you can spend your remaining days with your family, or whatever. SPOILERS AHEAD, but sorry — no one will ever know who actually killed Alison DiLaurentis on Pretty Little Liars.
Let's start with the little guys:
How I Met Your Mother: Drama! It was eventually revealed that Barney (Neil Patrick Harris) is marrying Robin (Cobie Smulders). Also, Victoria (Ashley Williams) left her future husband at the alter for Ted (Josh Radnor), but they broke up afterwards because Ted wouldn't stop being friends with Robin. Those crazy kids!
The Office: Angela (Angela Kinsey) found out that her husband was cheating on her with Oscar (Oscar Nuñez). Way to be a good coworker, Oscar.
Parks and Recreation: Speaking of workplace comedies, Leslie (Amy Poehler) and Ben (Adam Scott) finally became engaged! It was adorable.
You still with me? Good. Because it all goes downhill from here. Time for some suicides and martyrdom:
Sons of Anarchy: The universally beloved Opie (Ryan Hurst) was brutally murdered early in the show's fifth season — sacrificing his life for the club in the most horrendous way possible (he was beaten to death with a lead pipe).
Mad Men: Then there was the tragic tale of Lane Price (Jared Harris), the British sap who hung himself in his office after he found himself in financial trouble, and was fired by Don. Not a dry eye in the house.
But not all major deaths on TV this year were via suicide — 2012 was huge for killing, or being killed by, children. Let's explore, shall we?
Breaking Bad: In the former category, the artist formerly known as Landry (Jesse Plemons) from Friday Night Lights (now known as Todd on Breaking Bad) murdered a small child after said child witnessed Todd, Walt, and Jesse robbing a train. It was probably the most disturbing moment on TV this year, which says a lot, given our next spoiler.
The Walking Dead: This one sounds horrific, but it actually made a lot of people happy — Lori (Sarah Wayne Callies) died via C-section childbirth during a Walker attack on Walking Dead. Doc Herschel and the rest of the Grimes Gang were busy fighting Walkers in the prison, so Lori's son Carl (Chandler Riggs) had to watch while Maggie (Lauren Cohan) tore out her baby with a dirty knife. Then Carl shot her, before she rose again. It was a classic mother/son coming-of-age moment.
Downton Abbey: This one really hurt. Lady Sybil (Jessica Brown Findlay) from Downton also died during childbirth — but she didn't become a zombie, so she should just shut up and count her blessings.
Those were all really depressing, so let's move on to justice — quite a few criminals were caught in 2012:
Breaking Bad: First and foremost there's Walter White (Bryan Cranston), the drug kingpin currently known as Heisenberg . We haven't yet seen the aftermath, but the first half of Season 5 ended with Walt's brother-in-law Hank (Dean Norris) learning his dirty, methy secret. Dun dun dun.
Dexter: This was a long time coming — Deb (Jennifer Carpenter), the brilliant Miami Metro detective, finally learned that her brother is a serial killer. So far, she's been taking it surprisingly well.
The Killing: Oh, we finally found out who killed Rosie Larsen. It was her Aunt Terry, sort of. Then the show got canceled.
Homeland: Nick Brody (Damian Lewis) was found out and captured by the CIA much, much earlier than anticipated. He's now working with them as a double agent, which is never easy when your other agency is TERRORISM.
Enough with all the humans. Supernatural spoiler time:
The Vampire Diaries: Elena (Nina Dobrev) became a vampire at the end of the third season's finale. This season, she totally dumped Stefan (Paul Wesley) and slept with Damon (Ian Somerhalder). Bad girls do it well.
Fringe: Peter (Josh Jackson) willingly turned himself into an Observer after his daughter, Etta (Georgina Haig), was killed. It was horrifying. He's going bald!
True Blood: The newly single Bill (Stephen Moyer) willingly drank the blood of the ancient, evil vampire Lilith at the end of last season — rising as an evil entity, and effectively earning the nickname "Billith." Run, Sookeh!
Now let's move on to family drama:
Revenge: Season 1 of ABC's new(ish) hit ended with Emily (Emily VanCamp) learning that her long-lost mother (Jennifer Jason Leigh) was still alive, while everyone else thought that Victoria Grayson (Madeleine Stowe) had died. She hadn't, and Emily's mother ended up being very, very boring.
Revolution: Meanwhile, over on NBC's latest hit, good-guy Miles (Billy Burke) was revealed to have started the evil Monroe Militia — the same militia that recently kidnapped his nephew. (And they still haven't turned the lights on.)
Game of Thrones: In a case of outright family treachery, Theon (Alfie Allen) betrayed the Starks by storming Winterfell, pretending to kill young Bran and Rickon, and slaughtering many of their people.
Oh, and Klaine broke up on Glee. Follow Shaunna on Twitter @HWShaunna [PHOTO CREDIT: AMC, Showtime] MORE: Leanne's Spoiler List: 'True Blood' Wants Fresh Meat, 'Parenthood' Heads to Court, &amp; More! Leanne’s Spoiler List: 'AHS: Asylum' Mommy Issues, Love and Loss on ‘Dexter’ Leanne’s Spoiler List: Love is Shaky on ‘Grey’s Anatomy,' ‘Vampire Diaries’ Gets Darker
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Happy Thanksgiving! Today is the day that we awkwardly gather round the table before stuffing our faces and give thanks to the things that matter most in our lives: family, friends, and good health.
Well that's nice and all, but here at Hollywood.com we've compiled a list of things that we are truly thankful for. Things like Louie, Magic Mike, and Amy Poehler(We're proud to say that she's mentioned three different times). Check out our list and then share which pop-culture phenomenons you're most thankful for in 2012!
Kate Ward: I'm thankful to Louie for not only giving me quotable soundbites ("I… am… BORED!"), but also for helping me remember no matter how bad it gets, at least I don't have to help clean fecal matter off a raw meat-eating boy.
Leanne Aguilera: I’m thankful for the fact that Magic Mike was a legitimately good movie and that everyone has finally realized that “Call Me Maybe” is a truly obnoxious song. I’m thankful that Happy Endings is consistently amahzing (Wheee! What up skanks?!) and that I can blame my love for Glee on my job—when in reality it's one of the highlights of my week. I’m also thankful for Matt Bomer. Even though he doesn’t play on my team, it’s lovely to know that there are real life Disney princes walking among us.
Anna Brand: I am thankful for the release of Dawson's Creek instant streaming on Netflix, the "Shahs of Sunset", and these Gotye lip-syncing kids.
Alicia Lutes: I'm thankful for unending Lohan drama and the end of the 2012 election so that my blood pressure can return to normal. I'm thankful for drunk celebrities on Watch What Happens Live, and Twitter wars. I'm thankful for the friendship of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, and their shows 30 Rock and Parks and Rec being so great. I'm thankful for Solange Knowles' general flyness, and that people have finally stopped playing that Gotye song. I'm thankful for Maggie Smith always, but especially for her in the 3rd season (sorry, series) of Downton Abbey. I'm also glad that our president supported gay marriage because being hateful is so 2011. I'm also glad that Shame came out on DVD for, yes, the very obvious reasons.
Abbey Stone: I am thankful for a Matthew and Mary union (enough sexual tension is enough, Mr. Fellowes) and the Dowager Countess, like, in general. I am also thankful for Hillary Clinton's texting skillz and "Call Me Maybe" (because duh).
Michael Arbeiter: I am most thankful for the language perpetrated by the future island society in Cloud Atlas. From now on, I can happily proclaim my affirmation for an idea with not merely a “true,” but a “true-true.”
Matt Patches: I am thankful that Channing Tatum has finally convinced people that he's more than just a good-looking meathead. He's a good-looking meathead with acting chops and sensibilities that help good movies get made.
Sydney Bucksbaum: I am thankful that Hart of Dixie didn’t take the expected and easy way out of the big Season 1 cliffhanger: after Zoe and Wade finally admitted they had feelings for each other and hooked up, George called off his wedding to tell Zoe he loved her… while Wade was still in her bed! We all thought this CW charmer would just have Zoe dump Wade to jump George for Season 2, but then they surprised us by having Zoe turn George down and give Wade his much-deserved chance. This fall has been all about “Zade,” and I’m glad the love triangle has been rendered almost extinct… at least, for now. Giving Zoe and Wade’s relationship some time to grow has breathed new life into this show.
Keslea Stahler: Ryan Gosling doing anything ever, the way Schmidt on New Girl says Chutney (“Chutt-en-ee”), the fact that 30 Rock is going out with a good final season, DVR for allowing me to be a TV-nut without being a total shut-in.
Aly Semigran: I'm thankful for the 'Beasts of the Southern Wild' soundtrack for ensuring I had plenty of goosebumps in 2012, I'm thankful for Michael Fassbender and Ryan Gosling's budding bromance on the set of the new Terrence Malick movie (more goosebumps), and I'm thankful for Leslie Knope (the continually amazing Amy Poehler) proving, at long last, smart, successful women in love can have it all.
Michelle Lee: I'm thankful for Claire Danes' award-winning ugly crying, extremely entertaining political scandals, Amy Poehler's adorable ginger baby and that 50 Shades of Grey isn't mentioned 100 times a day anymore.
Brian Moylan: I am thankful that Laurie died on The Walking Dead. Also, for Kim Richards.
Shaunna Murphy: I'm thankful for Daryl Dixon holding babies, and that scene of Chloe Sevigny scaring the school children on American Horror Story. I'm also thankful because Cabin in the Woods finally came out, as well as Anderson Cooper.
Lindsey DiMattina: I am thankful that a judge took away Amanda Bynes' drivers license because a few speeding tickets/hit-and-runs could have been a lot worse if she had been allowed to continue to drive.
Christian Blauvelt: I’m grateful that TV finally proved my theory that acting ability is directly proportional to baldness. See: every male actor on Breaking Bad, Andre Braugher on Last Resort, and Jim Rash on Community (and on the Oscars, when he mimicked Angelina’s leg poses). Hairlessness is akin to godliness, it seems, with the obvious exception of Terry O’Quinn on 666 Park Avenue. Also, I’m thankful that James Bond got his sense of humor back, even though I’m convinced that Daniel Craig will look like Jonathan Banks in 15 years.
What in the world of pop culture are you thankful for? Shout 'em out in the comments below!
Follow Leanne on Twitter @LeanneAguilera
[Photo Credit: FX]
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M*A*S*H star Alda and Lear each received a Special Founders Award from the International Academy of Television Arts &amp; Sciences at the star-studded ceremony, hosted by retired U.S. talk show host Regis Philbin at the Hilton Hotel in Manhattan.
Lear, best known as creator of hit 1970s TV show All In The Family, said in his acceptance speech, "The world will, and needs to, come together through the arts."
Alda paid tribute to "the men and women in the hospital tents," referring to real-life medical personnel who risk their safety to treat war-time casualties, who he noted usually go unmentioned at award shows.
Glee creator Ryan Murphy was presented with the International Founders Award by Jessica Lange, the star of his hit TV series American Horror Story.
British novelist Sir Terry Pratchett was awarded the Best Documentary nod for his controversial programme about the process of assisted death, Terry Pratchett: Choosing To Die.
Presenters at the ceremony included actors Victor Garber, Donnie Wahlberg and Cheyenne Jackson.

It's tough out there for a new TV show. Creators put their hearts and souls into pilots, introducing their baby bird-like new series into the big, harsh world, all the while, hoping and praying their baby can fly. Well, as you know, some shows flourish and some shows plummet. Others glide along, barely getting by or delaying the inevitable: cancellation. It's a cruel, swift death we often call The Ax. Each week during Fall Premiere Season, we'll take a look at the ratings for fall's new crop of shows and tell you which ones are flapping their baby wings just hard enough, which ones are flying, and which ones sadly, will be a victim of the Ax Factor. This week, NBC showed mercy on its struggling comedy Guys With Kids, while CBS cancelled its own ratings dud, Partners.
Kristen Stewart's Future Career
Translation: Safe! Revolution (NBC, Mondays at 10 PM ET): Woah! Even the most popular kids in school have their bad days, and last Monday night was a disaster for Revolution. It's going on hiatus for four months to keep up its pairing with The Voice, and hopefully its March return will bring in higher numbers than Monday's. 7.1 million viewers and a 2.6 in the demo isn't the worst news — but the fact that it's slipping every week is something to worry about for next year. Go On (NBC, Tuesdays at 9 PM ET): Not bad, Chandler! Therapy was in session for 6.3 million viewers (a 2.3 in the demo) this week, and the sitcom was second in its time slot. We're already placing our bets on a Season 2. The New Normal (NBC, Tuesdays at 9:30 PM ET): The New Normal isn't doing nearly as well as Go On, only bringing in 4.7 million viewers and a 1.8 in the demo. Still, it also won second place in its time slot, and has a full-season order. So, nothing to worry about here.
Ben and Kate (Fox, Tuesdays at 8:30 PM ET): Yikes. The siblings are safe for now, but the numbers this week were abysmal — 2.5 million and a 1.1 in the demo. That's a 21 percent drop, and doesn't bode well for a Season 2.
The Mindy Project (Fox, Tuesdays at 9:30 PM ET): Well, the numbers still aren't great, but Mindy perked up a little this week, drawing in 3.2 million viewers and a 1.7 in its demo. Hey, at least it's not Ben and Kate, right?
Vegas (CBS, Tuesdays at 10 PM ET): CBS already placed its bet and rolled the dice on this one, but Vegasdropped to a new low this week — 10.4 million and a 1.6 in the demo. In CBS land, that's pretty crappy. Elementary (CBS, Thursdays at 10 PM ET): Elementary was up a smidge this week, drawing in 10.7 million viewers and a 2.3 in its demo.
Arrow (The CW, Wednesdays at 8 PM ET): Oliver Queen can do no wrong. Well, with ratings anyway. He screws up a lot on the show. But Arrowbrought in 3.8 million viewers and a 1.2 in its demo, so CW has a lot to celebrate. Chicago Fire (NBC, Wednesdays at 10 PM ET): The guys with no shirts drew in 5.7 million viewers and a 1.6 in its demo, which is actually a steep 27 percent drop from last week. Are you feeling the Season 2 pickup heat yet, boys?
The Neighbors (ABC, Wednesdays at 8:30 PM ET): They're still not getting anything close to Modern Family's numbers, but apparently 6.82 million viewers and a 1.9 in its demo is enough to merit a full-season order.
Beauty and the Beast (The CW, Thursdays at 9 PM ET): The beauty and her "beast" (underwear model with a scar on his face) dropped a tenth this week, bringing in 1.6 million viewers and a 0.6 in its demo. Are people finally beginning to realize that it isn't good?
Nashville (ABC, Wednesdays at 10 PM ET): Yee-haw! We're pleased as puddin' that ABC gave Nashville a full-season order. The show pulled in roughly 5.9 million viewers and a 1.8 in its demo this week — less than the "cancelled" dramas Last Resort and 666 Park, but critical success, a lower production cost, and impending album sales are enough to satisfy ABC at the moment.
Guys With Kids (NBC, Wednesdays at 8:30 PM ET): NBC thought that GWK's ratings would surge with the return of Whitney, while we thought it would get cancelled. We were both wrong. The show dropped again to 3.8 million viewers and a 1.3 in its demo, but NBC still ordered four more episodes.
Kellan Lutz' Future Career
Translation: Poised for Cancellation
The Mob Doctor (Fox, Mondays at 8 PM ET): 3.4 million and a 1.0 in its demo. Just let it die, already.
Emily Owens, M.D. (The CW, Tuesdays at 9 PM ET): The hot mess Emily Owens had a slightly better week on Tuesday — bringing in 1.4 million and a 0.4 in its demo — but that's still nothing to write home about. We're worried about this one, guys.
666 Park Avenue: (ABC, Sundays at 10 PM ET): Oh Terry and Vanessa, we're sad to see you go! After averaging only 6.7 million viewers and a 2.4 in its demo, ABC was forced to evict the haunted residents of The Drake. They'll run the remaining episodes, but they haven't picked up the back nine — which means it's not officially cancelled, but will be very soon.
Last Resort (ABC, Thursdays at 8 PM): ABC decided the fates of all of its freshman dramas this week, and while we weren't surprised to see 666 Park go, we thought they might show more faith in this one. We thought wrong. 9.2 million viewers and a 3.2 in the demo wasn't enough to justify keeping this ship afloat. Like with 666 Park, ABC will run the remaining episodes, but they haven't picked up the back nine.
Made In Jersey (CBS, Fridays at 9 PM ET): Huh? Apparently, they're airing the remaining episodes on Saturday beginning Nov. 24, but we wouldn't count on seeing much more from this dud.
Jackson Rathbone's Future Career
Translation: Canceled
Animal Practice (NBC, Wednesdays at 8 PM ET): The good news is, we've received confirmation that Crystal the Monkey WILL return to Community as Annie's Boobs.
Partners (CBS, Mondays at 8:30 PM ET): 6.5 million viewers on average would make some networks jump for joy, but it wasn't enough for CBS' Monday night comedy juggernaut. Canceled. How's your favorite show doing? Will you miss the wacky gang from Partners, or are you glad to see them go? Do you think 666 Park or Last Resort has a fighting chance? Sound off in the comments! Follow Shaunna on Twitter @HWShaunna [PHOTO CREDIT: CBS] MORE: 'The Ax Factor': 'Chicago Fire' and 'Beauty and the Beast' Escape the Reaper The Ax Factor: 'Arrow' and CBS Dramas Hit Their Mark, 'Emily Owens' is DOA The Ax Factor: 'Animal Practice' Closes Its Doors, 'Nashville' Sings a Sad Note
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If there's a cinematic alchemy award to be given this year director Bill Condon deserves to take it home after magically turning the tedious Twilight franchise into entertainment gold. 2011's Part 1 was a horror camp romp that turned the supernatural love triangle — the naval gazing trio of Bella Edward and Jacob — on its head. Breaking Dawn - Part 2 continues the madcap exploration of a world populated by vampires and werewolves mining even more comedy thrills and genuine character moments out of conceit than ever before. The film occasionally sidesteps back into Edward and Bella's meandering romance (an evident hurdle of author Stephenie Meyer's source material) but the duller moments are overshadowed by the movie's nimble pace and playful attitude. Breaking Dawn - Part 2 will elicit laughs aplenty — but thankfully they're all on purpose.
Part 2 picks up immediately following the events of the first film Bella (Kristen Stewart) having been turned into a vampire by Edward (Robert Pattinson) to save her life after the torturous delivery of her half-human half-vampire child Renesmee. She awakes to discover super senses heightened agility increased strength… and a thirst for blood. One dead cougar later Bella and the gang are able to focus on the real troubles ahead: Renesmee is rapidly growing (think Jack) and vampiric overlords The Volturi perceive her a threat to vampiric secrecy. Knowing the Volturi will travel to Forks WA to kill the young girl (a 10-year-old just a month after being born) The Cullens amass an army of bloodsucking friends to end the oppression once and for all.
Packed with an absurd amount of backstory and mythology-twisting plot points (some vampires can shoot lightning now?) Condon and series screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg mine revel in the beefed up ensemble of Breaking Dawn - Part 2 and thanks to a wildly funny cast it never feels like pointless deviation. Along with the usual suspects Lee Pace adds swagger to the series as a grungy alt-rock vampire Noel Fisher appears as a hilarious over-the-top battle-ready Russian coven member and Michael Sheen returns has Volturi head honcho Aro and steels the show. Flamboyant diabolical and a steady stream of maniacal laughter Sheen owns Condon's high camp vision for Twilight and he lights up the screen. There are a few throw away nations of vampires — the oddly stereotypical Egyptian and Amazonians sects are there mostly there to off-set the extreme whiteness — but the actors involved bring liveliness to a franchise known for being soulless. Even Stewart Pattinson and Taylor Lautner give personal bests in this installment — a scene between Bella and her dad Charlie (Billy Burke) is genuinely heartfelt while Jacob's overprotective hero schtick finally lands.
Whereas Breaking Dawn - Part 1 stuck mostly to the personal story relying on the intimate moments as Bella and Edward took the big plunge into marriage and sex Part 2 paints with broader strokes and Condon has a ball. Delving into the history of the vampires and the vampire world outside Forks is Pandora's Box for the director. One scene where we learn why kids scare the heck of the Volturi captures a scope of medieval epics — along with the bloodshed. Twilight might be known for its sexual moments but Breaking Dawn - Part 2 will go down for its abundance of decapitations. The big set piece in the finale is something to behold both in the craftsmanship of the spectacle and in its bizarre nature.
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 had the audience hooting hollering and even gasping as it twisted and turned to the final moments. There's little doubt that even the biggest naysayer of the franchise would do the same. No irony here: the conclusion of Twilight is a blast.

It's tough out there for a new TV show. Creators put their hearts and souls into pilots, introducing their baby bird-like new series into the big, harsh world, all the while, hoping and praying their baby can fly. Well, as you know, some shows flourish and some shows plummet. Others glide along, barely getting by or delaying the inevitable: cancellation. It's a cruel, swift death we often call The Ax. Each week during Fall Premiere Season, we'll take a look at the ratings for fall's new crop of shows and tell you which ones are flapping their baby wings just hard enough, which ones are flying, and which ones sadly, will be a victim of the Ax Factor. This week, Chicago Fire and Beauty and the Beast received full-season orders, while Partners held on for dear life.
Happier than the Blue States
Translation: Safe! Revolution (NBC, Mondays at 10 PM ET): Revolution dropped a little this week, to 10.7 million viewers and a 2.9 in the demo. Still, this massive hit is sitting pretty. Go On (NBC, Tuesdays at 9 PM ET): Election night repeat, full-season order. Therapy will remain in session. The New Normal (NBC, Tuesdays at 9:30 PM ET): Gays with kids took a week off to watch President Obama win, happy with their full-season order and maintained civil rights. Ben and Kate (Fox, Tuesdays at 8:30 PM ET): See above. They aired an election night repeat, but the crazy sibs will bicker on your television screen this spring. The Mindy Project (Fox, Tuesdays at 9:30 PM ET): Repeat! Obama! Full-season! Vegas (CBS, Tuesdays at 10 PM ET): Election night repeat. Hopefully no one bet on a Romney win, though with a full-season already in the bank, their pockets should remain stuffed. Elementary (CBS, Thursdays at 10 PM ET): Sherlock and Watson have remained steady, capturing 10.7 million viewers and a 2.2 in the demo. They've also been picked up for a full-season, so let's examine their fate later this year. Arrow (The CW, Wednesdays at 8 PM ET): Oliver Queen just keeps hitting that mark! Arrow surged 30 percent this week, delivering a great episode that brought in 3.7 million viewers and a 1.3 in the adult demo. He's already received a full-season order, this is just icing on the cake that he can't eat because it would ruin his abs. PHOTOS: TV's 17 Most Disgusting Moments Chicago Fire (NBC, Wednesdays at 10 PM ET): In a victory for hot shirtless men (and fans of hot shirtless men) everywhere, Chicago Fire became the second NBC drama to receive a full-season order this week. This came after a 44 percent jump Wednesday night, with 7.1 million viewers and a 2.3 in the demo. The Neighbors (ABC, Wednesdays at 8:30 PM ET): The aliens drew in 7 million and a 2.1 in their demo this week — nothing close to Modern Family, but the critical dud has already received a full-season order, so E.T. won't be phoning home anytime soon. Beauty and the Beast (The CW, Thursdays at 9 PM ET): Kristin Kreuk took a risk with that underwear model and his scar, and The CW has officially taken a risk by giving this stinker a full-season order. They pulled in 1.9 million viewers and a 0.7 in the demo this week, which isn't too shabby for CW, but nothing compared to their biggest hits, The Vampire Diaries or Arrow. As Shaky as Diane Sawyer's Sobriety on Election Night Translation: Only Time Will Tell Nashville (ABC, Wednesdays at 10 PM ET): Nashville pulled in 6 million viewers and a 2.0 in its demo this week, up a bit from last. Great? Nope. But since the show is such a critical hit, ABC might be picking it up soon. Clear eyes, full hearts, and Connie Britton can't lose. Last Resort (ABC, Thursdays at 8 PM): The submarine rose a little bit this week, up to 6 million viewers and a 1.4 in the adult demo. Going up against The X Factor AND The Voice isn't easy, but numbers will have to improve soon to merit Last Resort's expensive production. As Screwed as Los Angeles County's Porn StarsTranslation: Fear the Reaper 666 Park Avenue: (ABC, Sundays at 10 PM ET): Sorry, Terry and Vanessa — we love you, but being that ABC has to also decide on freshman dramas Nashville and Last Resort soon, we're betting on the show with the worst reviews and lowest ratings to get the ax. That's you, buddy. 4.1 million viewers and a 1.4 in the demo isn't enough to justify your sexy post-Revenge time-slot. PHOTOS: Fall TV Characters Who Should Contribute to the Douchejar Partners (CBS, Mondays at 8:30 PM ET): Partners continues to deliver the lowest ratings on CBS' Monday night comedy block (5.8 million, 2.1) but the friends are still hanging out, for now. Still, not a good idea to get too attached. The Mob Doctor (Fox, Mondays at 8 PM ET): The Mob Doctor rose a little upon its return to 3.9 million viewers and a 1.0 in the demo, but we're still betting on this one getting whacked any day now. Emily Owens, M.D. (The CW, Tuesdays at 9 PM ET): There's still a faint heartbeat in Emily Owens, even though the election called for a repeat this week. But we're expecting the fatal "beeeeeep" at some point this fall. Guys With Kids (NBC, Wednesdays at 8:30 PM ET): The guys had a week off of babysitting duty this week, but we're not expecting a huge ratings increase when they return on the 14th. Deader Than the Romney CampaignTranslation: Canceled Made In Jersey (CBS, Fridays at 9 PM ET): We already forget what this is. Animal Practice (NBC, Wednesdays at 8 PM ET): What happened to all of the animals?! Cancelled. How's your favorite show doing? Were you surprised to see a gaggle of critically-panned shows picked up this week? Follow Shaunna on Twitter @HWShaunna [PHOTO CREDIT: NBC] MORE: The Ax Factor: 'Arrow' and CBS Dramas Hit Their Mark, 'Emily Owens' is DOA The Ax Factor: 'Animal Practice' Closes Its Doors, 'Nashville' Sings a Sad Note The Ax Factor: 'Made in Jersey' Gets Unmade, Say YeeHaw to 'Nashville' From Our Partners: Ariel Winter’s Mom Claims She Found Daughter in Bed With 18-Year-Old Boyfriend, Police Report Reveals (EXCLUSIVE) (Celebuzz) Reese Witherspoon’s Son Tennessee James Makes Public Debut (PHOTOS) (Celebuzz)