Tuesday, April 15, 2008

It embarasses the editors of this site to even have to mention this. But for those of you without a clue, here's one for free:

Women display outward body language signals when they do not wish to be bothered during their commute.

Since it is obvious that these signals are not universally known, allow us to spell it the hell out for you with a few examples:

Zoning out to headphones

Reading a book / magazine

Talking / Texting on a cell phone

...especially if she goes back to the headphones, reading materials, phone after spurning your lame-o advances.

The general guidelines here are simple...

DO:

Toss that swell-looking dame a line. Preferably not a funny-but-largely-unsuccessful one like "are your pants made of mirrors? ...cuz I can see myself in them." If you toss a line and she catches it, proceed with conversation.

DO NOT:

Proceed without acknowledgment. If you attempt contact and are denied, leave her alone!

Don't be That Guy who continues hitting on her when she's rolling her eyes, looking away, keeping the headphones on, or concentrating on that book/magazine/iPod/cell phone/back of hand rather than meeting your creep-tastic gaze.

Get a clue, leave her be and head home to grab that Striped Shirt before heading out to Estelle's.