The cat talked tonight and I am certain she’s schizophrenic and thinks people and inanimate objects talk to her.

She came into my life over a year ago shortly after I swore I’d never own a cat. Little did I know this black siren would play my children and enter our family on a bet. We were visiting family in Kentucky and as usual in the country you’ll encounter the barn cats and stray dogs. They honestly balance things for children in the Appalachia. Many of my best friends and confidences were animals. It taught me about unconditional love, trust, and loyalty. You’ll never find friendship like that of animals or someone who gives you and expects nothing but love in return.

So the black siren came as we visited Mam-maw (grandmother) just over a year ago. The kids had played with the cutest litter of stray barn kittens. Something I was happy they got to enjoy, something I cherished from my childhood in Kentucky.

The kids begged and begged for us to take one home. Of course, selfishly I wanted a black cat, always loved them because they shared a stigma. I said if a little black kitten comes tonight we’ll take her home tomorrow. Within minutes, we see this lone black kitten running to the door. “Dammit”, I thought, but honestly I was probably as thrilled as the kids. She was perfect! Absolutely the perfect cat. I agreed, but said we will name her Trubul like trouble, because I’m certain she’ll be nothing but trouble.

Fast forward, she is trying to kill me. Trubul has now been with the family long enough to execute plans. She’s no longer pet, but captive. I am her captor. She is living out the “Unbreakable” story (she watched the movie with me, I saw her snap). She would guard her catnip mouses, plan sniper attacks, plot her escape.

I only knew the cat was as crazy as me when I saw her talking to herself. Yes, talking to herself. She would meow something and in another tone meow back. It would continue, she would fight her alter ego for the one mouse not hidden under a couch. Everyday I accepted my cat was a schizophrenic bipolar cat.

Tonight she turned on me. In retrospect, it was when I tried to meditate, but she turned (see previous post). I was the enemy and we had a battle.

Without it being an “offense worthy of commitment” the cat has the upper hand. I’ll never have a rabbit to chase down a hole, because Trubul will kill it and probably lay it on my pillow, like a horse head from the godfather movie. She runs the house, she has the love, she controls the dog……to be continued CAT……to be continued….

18 thoughts on “The Cat talked tonight”

I, too, have a crazy cat and the veterinarian has confirmed it. He suggested Xanax for the cat (I have my own supply) but I wondered how I would give a totally feral cat rescued from the streets of Egypt the medication. By blowdart, perhaps? I love Trubel and all cats.

Now I don’t want to tell you this because of you know it you appear to have chosen not to do it, or if you didn’t know it and it works the world becomes a little less amusing.

Unless you enjoy being used as a big mouse, set up the conditions where he would normally attack you, appear to be paying no attention but have a spray bottle of water with you. As he runs in and launches the attack give him one sharp spray of water, preferably head on. It does no harm to the car other than to it’s ego. You become the dominant animal and it only takes a few trials before the attacks stop. It works for training them not to jump up on the kitchen counters too. All other cat training involves food. Now I find myself secretly hoping it doesn’t work so you can still be entertaining me with tails of the big game pussycat hunting you down.

Oh my my my how this reminds me of my little kitten… Who is currently, also, plotting my takedown. He knows just how to manipulate my husband and I and is constantly exercising his dominance in the house. But I let him. We named him Ninja after having him a few days because he was the stealthiest little thing we’d ever seen! He is constantly ready for attack! Nonetheless he provides much of our entertainment and gets all of the love and snuggles he wants, when he’s exhaustingly sleepy of course. Oh and he’s black too (with a few white spots). Hoping Trubul doesn’t cause too much trouble for you and your family!!! Good luck!!! Hahahaha

that was certainly entertaining.
thanks for liking my post
oh, and if you dont mind me asking, and pardon me if it’s insensitive, but have you ever written or published an article when you are…lets say…on the other side of your bipolar (from a generally normal perspective of course)
Kudos to your confidence though

I’ll certainly give it a shot. It’s funny, this is my relative normal. I only go up or down, but without my anti psychotic, mood stablizers, and varies other medications. Honestly, I’m sure there is a real normal, I’d just have to go off meds. Then it’s very short lived.