theflatline:tlars699: TheYeti: tlars699: thurstonxhowell: BalugaJoe: I paid for both of my degrees. Why do parents have to pay for anything?

They don't have to pay for anything. It is a tremendous dick move to not at least fill out the FAFSA, though.

Wrong. You sign up for a student loan? Part of the law says that if you default they can hound your parents, too. It's in the contract you sign to get the loan.

They can contact the people that you listed as contacts/references, but if they don't sign off on it (Perkins loans, Stafford) the parents aren't legally required to pay for anything.

Then please explain to me why when my parents never co-signed a loan (because they automatically refuse anything to do with "co-sign"), Sallie Mae kept calling them for payment when I was in default, due to unemployment after graduation.

They are contractually obligated to pay for their children. Said so to me over the phone, when I asked the representative at the time, as I had set up the default terms.

Parents are not responsible for repaying their child's federal student loans even if the child is or was underage. Federal student loans are not subject to the defense of infancy, per sections 484A(b)(2) and (3) of the HigherEducation Act of 1965.

Federal Parent PLUS is a cosigned loan, so if it were that case your parents did cosign and are on the hook.

Sallie Mae is a private loan company, and they were getting calls because.

a. they were listed as alternate contacts for you, and were merely trying to hunt you down, and con your parents into a payment.

b. Most Sallie Mae loans are cosigned.

Thanks for informing, and citations.I was fairly sure it was also listed in the contract itself, as these loans were originally made in 2004 and I had looked at the document while rep was explaining to me what was going on, but I haven't looked for a while since then, so can't say for certain.

Phone message left for Liz Canning from Rachel at July 2, 2013 1:18pm, submitted to Superior Court of New Jersey'Hi mom just to let you know you're a real f**king winner aren't you you think you're so cool and you think you caught me throwing up in the bathroom after eating an egg frittatta, yeah sorry that you have problems now and you need to harp on mine because i didn't and i actually took a s*** which i really just wanna s*** all over your face right now because it looks like that anyway, anyway i f***ing hate you and um I've written you off so don't talk to me, don't do anything I'm blocking you from just about everything, have a nice life, bye mom'

"But pay for college for me!"

I have a daughter who is 12. I am not looking forward to the teenage years.

what_now: That's because you don't have custody of the child. If you were still married to the child's other parent, you would have no mandated child support obligation.

Also, this is bullshiat. Divorce and custody have nothing to do with it. If state law so proscribes (as in my case) all parents have a duty to support a child through college. It's not a punishment on divorced or separated parents as is implied.

All parents have a duty to support their kids regardless of the child's age or marital status. It may not be in court yet, but if you think you don't have to take care of your kid you're probably on your way to family court. Trust me, you won't like it. And if you think you can jack your kid around then you deserve exactly that.

profplump:theflatline: If you are 18 and live at home you should follow the rules.

"The rules" should be something you collectively agree on, not something that old rich people get to dictate because they're old and rich. We're all assholes, and the fact that old people are assholes in a different way than young people doesn't make them right.

profplump:theflatline: If you are 18 and live at home you should follow the rules.

"The rules" should be something you collectively agree on, not something that old rich people get to dictate because they're old and rich. We're all assholes, and the fact that old people are assholes in a different way than young people doesn't make them right.

Bullshiat. "The rules" of my house are made by anyone who pays the mortgage. I don't care if it is my 18 year old daughter or my parents, my house my rules.

jst3p:Phone message left for Liz Canning from Rachel at July 2, 2013 1:18pm, submitted to Superior Court of New Jersey'Hi mom just to let you know you're a real f**king winner aren't you you think you're so cool and you think you caught me throwing up in the bathroom after eating an egg frittatta, yeah sorry that you have problems now and you need to harp on mine because i didn't and i actually took a s*** which i really just wanna s*** all over your face right now because it looks like that anyway, anyway i f***ing hate you and um I've written you off so don't talk to me, don't do anything I'm blocking you from just about everything, have a nice life, bye mom'

"But pay for college for me!"

I have a daughter who is 12. I am not looking forward to the teenage years.

How easy was potty training?How easy was getting her to talk and play nice as a little one?My parenting philosophy:Boys: Invest early, watch payoffs after 10 years of doing well.Girls: Make small payments early, invest in years after 10.

Degenz:what_now: That's because you don't have custody of the child. If you were still married to the child's other parent, you would have no mandated child support obligation.

Also, this is bullshiat. Divorce and custody have nothing to do with it. If state law so proscribes (as in my case) all parents have a duty to support a child through college. It's not a punishment on divorced or separated parents as is implied.

All parents have a duty to support their kids regardless of the child's age or marital status. It may not be in court yet, but if you think you don't have to take care of your kid you're probably on your way to family court. Trust me, you won't like it. And if you think you can jack your kid around then you deserve exactly that.

Don't have kids if you can't deal with it.

Yeah, I have no intention of having kids. But, I've worked in college financial aid for a decade and I can tell you that if a parent does not want to complete a FAFSA, or pay for college, they are under no legal requirement to do so, UNLESS their is a divorce decree.

Does it make you a shiatty parent? Yes, probably. But it's not illegal to be a shiatty parent.

tlars699:TheYeti: tlars699: thurstonxhowell: BalugaJoe: I paid for both of my degrees. Why do parents have to pay for anything?

They don't have to pay for anything. It is a tremendous dick move to not at least fill out the FAFSA, though.

Wrong. You sign up for a student loan? Part of the law says that if you default they can hound your parents, too. It's in the contract you sign to get the loan.

They can contact the people that you listed as contacts/references, but if they don't sign off on it (Perkins loans, Stafford) the parents aren't legally required to pay for anything.

Then please explain to me why when my parents never co-signed a loan (because they automatically refuse anything to do with "co-sign"), Sallie Mae kept calling them for payment when I was in default, due to unemployment after graduation.

They are contractually obligated to pay for their children. Said so to me over the phone, when I asked the representative at the time, as I had set up the default terms.

tlchwi02:brimed03: given the choice, I'd admin in FinAid somewhere before serving as Putin's secret towel boy but somewhere after forced listening to Sarah Palin's complete set of public utterances. Both would break my sanity, but only FinAid admin would break my heart.

you have a strangely specific set of criteria for that job

No, I just have an oddly complete list of options for how to spend my life.

These three options are far down in the lower third of the list. Funny enough, creating the list was right at the top.

profplump:theflatline: If you are 18 and live at home you should follow the rules.

"The rules" should be something you collectively agree on, not something that old rich people get to dictate because they're old and rich. We're all assholes, and the fact that old people are assholes in a different way than young people doesn't make them right.

Umm... no... I get my ass out of bed at 6 AM, drive an hour to get my ass to work, take shiat from other people for 9 hours then drive another hour home (fighting asshole drivers both ways)... when I get home, I don't need to take your shiat... its my house, my rules.. unless you contribute you have no say in the manner... and even if you did get a job and ask to contribute, its still my house that I have worked for and paid for longer than you have lived... I should be able to enjoy the fruits of my labor. If you do not like it.. the door is over there and don't let it hit you in the ass on the way out.

profplump:theflatline: If you are 18 and live at home you should follow the rules.

"The rules" should be something you collectively agree on, not something that old rich people get to dictate because they're old and rich. We're all assholes, and the fact that old people are assholes in a different way than young people doesn't make them right.

what_now:Yeah, I have no intention of having kids. But, I've worked in college financial aid for a decade and I can tell you that if a parent does not want to complete a FAFSA, or pay for college, they are under no legal requirement to do so, UNLESS their is a divorce decree.

Does it make you a shiatty parent? Yes, probably. But it's not illegal to be a shiatty parent.

Welp, there you go. College financial aide workers are the scummiest of scum. Worse even than the fly-by-night mortgage lenders who gave away houses with no down payment and caused the Great Recession of 2008 and made the government bail them out.

Degenz:what_now: Yeah, I have no intention of having kids. But, I've worked in college financial aid for a decade and I can tell you that if a parent does not want to complete a FAFSA, or pay for college, they are under no legal requirement to do so, UNLESS their is a divorce decree.

Does it make you a shiatty parent? Yes, probably. But it's not illegal to be a shiatty parent.

Welp, there you go. College financial aide workers are the scummiest of scum. Worse even than the fly-by-night mortgage lenders who gave away houses with no down payment and caused the Great Recession of 2008 and made the government bail them out.

College fund can be withdrawn, with penalty, and once they do so, she gets nothing. I'd do so immediately. It may not even be in her name in the first place, so no worries there.

She cannot obligate her parents on a student loan. unless the parents legally sign on as co-signers, it is not their problem.

Really, screw thsi lying biatch. Follow up article has lovely detail about her. Sadly, the parents have a complete failure of a human being as their offspring. Write her off as a loss, destroy her belongings, change all of the locks, and move on.

Well, I will say that you want to be careful about the level of douchetastic "Our roof, our rules," shiat you try to pull with adult offspring, as it can end up biting you in the ass later if you wish to be a part of their lives. You may discover that they decide when they have a roof, their rules include "You aren't welcome."

As a simple example: My parents were always very good to me, did a good job of balancing privileges and responsibilities, not being overly controlling, and helping me out with college and so on. We get along great, they are welcome to come and visit any time they like, I've built a nice guest room for them, and should the time come when they can't care for themselves, I'll do so. If they fell on financial hard times, I'd support them, and so on. Then there's my friend, he rarely speaks to his parents. Maybe one a year. They are not welcome to come and visit, haven't met his wife, and so on. If they take ill/infirm, that's their problem, he's told me he just doesn't care.

The big warning signs I see in this case are the curfew, and telling her she can't date someone. That is just silly. Particularly the dating thing. That just screams "We want to control your life." Ya, the guy may be a loser, so what? Some people will date losers no matter what, and no there's nothing you can do to "fix" them. Some date a couple and get it out of their system. My sister was like that (thankfully). Trying to exert control over it is just retarded, and doomed to fail.

So to me, it looks like the parents are being overbearing shiatheads who think that living at home means they get to control her life. Now no question, she's being a bit of a spoiled princess too, but it really sounds like the parents are setting some rather unreasonable rules and so it is no surprise there's conflict.

Degenz:Welp, there you go. College financial aide workers are the scummiest of scum. Worse even than the fly-by-night mortgage lenders who gave away houses with no down payment and caused the Great Recession of 2008 and made the government bail them out.

College fund can be withdrawn, with penalty, and once they do so, she gets nothing. I'd do so immediately. It may not even be in her name in the first place, so no worries there.

She cannot obligate her parents on a student loan. unless the parents legally sign on as co-signers, it is not their problem.

Really, screw thsi lying biatch. Follow up article has lovely detail about her. Sadly, the parents have a complete failure of a human being as their offspring. Write her off as a loss, destroy her belongings, change all of the locks, and move on.

Reading the thread might have helped prevent you from making such inaccurate posts.

College fund can be withdrawn, with penalty, and once they do so, she gets nothing. I'd do so immediately. It may not even be in her name in the first place, so no worries there.

She cannot obligate her parents on a student loan. unless the parents legally sign on as co-signers, it is not their problem.

Really, screw thsi lying biatch. Follow up article has lovely detail about her. Sadly, the parents have a complete failure of a human being as their offspring. Write her off as a loss, destroy her belongings, change all of the locks, and move on.

Don't be too quick to take the father's side. He's an overpaid, double dipping, underworked, roid-case excop. This is him. Wanna bet dollars to donuts he's a controlling fark?

Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

If you're wondering where this girl learned her selfish, bulshiat behavior, take a look at the a-hole she's got for a dad.

sycraft:Well, I will say that you want to be careful about the level of douchetastic "Our roof, our rules," shiat you try to pull with adult offspring, as it can end up biting you in the ass later if you wish to be a part of their lives. You may discover that they decide when they have a roof, their rules include "You aren't welcome."

As a simple example: My parents were always very good to me, did a good job of balancing privileges and responsibilities, not being overly controlling, and helping me out with college and so on. We get along great, they are welcome to come and visit any time they like, I've built a nice guest room for them, and should the time come when they can't care for themselves, I'll do so. If they fell on financial hard times, I'd support them, and so on. Then there's my friend, he rarely speaks to his parents. Maybe one a year. They are not welcome to come and visit, haven't met his wife, and so on. If they take ill/infirm, that's their problem, he's told me he just doesn't care.

The big warning signs I see in this case are the curfew, and telling her she can't date someone. That is just silly. Particularly the dating thing. That just screams "We want to control your life." Ya, the guy may be a loser, so what? Some people will date losers no matter what, and no there's nothing you can do to "fix" them. Some date a couple and get it out of their system. My sister was like that (thankfully). Trying to exert control over it is just retarded, and doomed to fail.

So to me, it looks like the parents are being overbearing shiatheads who think that living at home means they get to control her life. Now no question, she's being a bit of a spoiled princess too, but it really sounds like the parents are setting some rather unreasonable rules and so it is no surprise there's conflict.

I agree with the who she can date thing being over the top and hopelessly unenforceable, but I don't see any other rules, including a curfew, that I would deem unreasonable.

dwrash:I think I have given this speech half a dozen times over the years.

Six kids? Or three slow ones?

tlars699:They are contractually obligated to pay for their children. Said so to me over the phone, when I asked the representative at the time, as I had set up the default terms.

As others have said, nope, not true. I was able to settle my student loans for less then the original amount because they couldn't come after my parents. My parents agreed to loan me the money (which I am proud to have repaid) to settle my loans, but the loan company couldn't force my parents to do squat. Basically, the negotiation tactic was "you can have this amount immediately or keep trying to get blood from a stone." It worked.

sycraft:Well, I will say that you want to be careful about the level of douchetastic "Our roof, our rules," shiat you try to pull with adult offspring, as it can end up biting you in the ass later if you wish to be a part of their lives. You may discover that they decide when they have a roof, their rules include "You aren't welcome."

As a simple example: My parents were always very good to me, did a good job of balancing privileges and responsibilities, not being overly controlling, and helping me out with college and so on. We get along great, they are welcome to come and visit any time they like, I've built a nice guest room for them, and should the time come when they can't care for themselves, I'll do so. If they fell on financial hard times, I'd support them, and so on. Then there's my friend, he rarely speaks to his parents. Maybe one a year. They are not welcome to come and visit, haven't met his wife, and so on. If they take ill/infirm, that's their problem, he's told me he just doesn't care.

The big warning signs I see in this case are the curfew, and telling her she can't date someone. That is just silly. Particularly the dating thing. That just screams "We want to control your life." Ya, the guy may be a loser, so what? Some people will date losers no matter what, and no there's nothing you can do to "fix" them. Some date a couple and get it out of their system. My sister was like that (thankfully). Trying to exert control over it is just retarded, and doomed to fail.

So to me, it looks like the parents are being overbearing shiatheads who think that living at home means they get to control her life. Now no question, she's being a bit of a spoiled princess too, but it really sounds like the parents are setting some rather unreasonable rules and so it is no surprise there's conflict.

I do not consider 18 an adult, I certainly was not one when I was 18.

But she showed up drunk at a school event, and was suspended for skipping school on multiple occasions, stole hers sisters shiat, and acting like an asshole, the parents tightened up the rules as they should have.

Did I mention stealing cash from her moms purse so she could go to a party? Using her parents credit card to buy shiat without permission?

I can see 1 or two events but shiat like that starts to add up and as a parent you cannot roll with those kind of punches.

She decides to play the ultimate card and move not realizing her parents would say ok, but no bennies for you.

Fissile:Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

Nothing like a little unfounded speculation to unnecessarily inflame a thread.

Degenz:Yea, guess what. Under state law the terms of my child support obligation continue if my kid decides to pursue a secondary education. For those of you that don't get it - it means you have to keep sending a check for as long as the snowflake is going to college, up until they turn 24, or something.

Thankfully, junior has a real job in manufacturing and supplements his income playing gigs at a Death Metal joint on weekends. If you're ever in Lawrence, Kansas go check them out sometime.

https://www.facebook.com/Species913

You're in Kansas? Child support ends the June 30th following graduation from high school. Secondary education generally means high school in the US.

Jim_Callahan:Wow. I got emancipated (at 16) so that my parents and I could pay for my undergrad (in-state tuition).

This seems kinda ass-backward.

// You can still be legally a dependent at 18 if your parents are still claiming you. At 18 they have the option of not doing so, though, or rather there's no extra emancipation paperwork beyond not listing you as a dependent on their taxes.

Though in many jurisdictions an 18-year-old is considered an adult, IRS rules stipulate that you can claim a deduction for your child as long as she is younger than 19 at the end of the year. The year she turns 18, no matter if her birthday falls on January 1 or December 31, you can still claim her, as long as she meets all the other requirements for a deduction. The following year you may have to give up that deduction, unless she's in school full-time. If your child is permanently disabled, the IRS waives the age requirement altogether.

If your child is a full-time student who relies on you for support, you can continue to deduct him from your taxes until he turns 24 or graduates, whichever comes first. Your child must be enrolled full-time in school, and he must be younger than you or your spouse.

If your 18-year old is living on his own and not a student, you can no longer claim him on your taxes. If your child is legally emancipated, you can't claim him as a dependent. If your child supplies more than half of his own support, you aren't entitled to list him as a dependent.

Crewmannumber6:Fissile: Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

Nothing like a little unfounded speculation to unnecessarily inflame a thread.

How many Jersey cops do you know? Didn't like the boyfriend usually means he's not white, or mooslime, or some such thing. If he was a juiced-up thug, like dad, on the other hand, is OK.

Dr.Fey:dwrash: I think I have given this speech half a dozen times over the years.

Six kids? Or three slow ones?

tlars699: They are contractually obligated to pay for their children. Said so to me over the phone, when I asked the representative at the time, as I had set up the default terms.

As others have said, nope, not true. I was able to settle my student loans for less then the original amount because they couldn't come after my parents. My parents agreed to loan me the money (which I am proud to have repaid) to settle my loans, but the loan company couldn't force my parents to do squat. Basically, the negotiation tactic was "you can have this amount immediately or keep trying to get blood from a stone." It worked.

/anyone else negotiate their loans down ("settled in full")?

O_O

*worships the ground you walk on*Please... show me the way.

I did get my credit score up to 635, though, so not so sure I want to screw that up by not paying to prove "blood from stone" point.

Damn that girl is a loony biatch. If the parents have more emails and voicemails of her's like those, this will be a very interesting and open and shut case.

But I don't see why she is continuing to try to sue. Her parents already said they would pay for the rest of her high school and give her access to her college fund. She seems to be just a hateful spoiled biatch and I doubt she will even finish school.

Fissile:Crewmannumber6: Fissile: Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

Nothing like a little unfounded speculation to unnecessarily inflame a thread.

How many Jersey cops do you know? Didn't like the boyfriend usually means he's not white, or mooslime, or some such thing. If he was a juiced-up thug, like dad, on the other hand, is OK.

As the father of a teenage girl, I can assure you there are plenty of white pieces of shiat to not approve of.

Crewmannumber6:Fissile: Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

Nothing like a little unfounded speculation to unnecessarily inflame a thread.

Fissile:Crewmannumber6: Fissile: Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

Nothing like a little unfounded speculation to unnecessarily inflame a thread.

How many Jersey cops do you know? Didn't like the boyfriend usually means he's not white, or mooslime, or some such thing. If he was a juiced-up thug, like dad, on the other hand, is OK.

Or you know, the real boyfriend could be the lawyer-dad, who is old and fat and rich. :\

Fissile:Don't be too quick to take the father's side. He's an overpaid, double dipping, underworked, roid-case excop. This is him. Wanna bet dollars to donuts he's a controlling fark?

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x612]

Apparently dad kicked out his little snowflake because he didn't approve of her boyfriend. I'm gonna guess the boyfriend was too, oh, I don't know, too black? Jersey cops are so racist, they make the KKK look like the Rainbow coalition by comparison.

If you're wondering where this girl learned her selfish, bulshiat behavior, take a look at the a-hole she's got for a dad.

It's because of farking POS cops like this that the state of NJ is broke. POS dad retired at 47 from his cop job..that he got through nepotism or patronage...started collecting a 6 figure pension, with 100% health, dental and vision for himself and his wife for life, and then was immediately hired as a town administrator in a neighboring berg and is being paid $100K+ WHILE COLLECTING A $100K PENSION.

I wonder where his daughter learned about greed?

Fark this guy and whore he rode in on. I hope his snow flake ends up doing porn.

jst3p:I agree with the who she can date thing being over the top and hopelessly unenforceable, but I don't see any other rules, including a curfew, that I would deem unreasona ...

A curfew is a little silly. I'm not saying it is totally out of the question, but I'd need to know why, and the reason needs to be pretty good. Heck, I didn't have a curfew when I was 16. That didn't mean I had permission to stay out at late as I wanted, but no silly shiat of "You be home by this precise time OR ELSE!" The reason I see it as a warning is combined with the "You can't date this person," thing. It just smacks of a controlling attitude where they want to dictate what she can and can't do in all respects.

Also it just seems stupid to me to do to an adult, which is what someone is at 18 (and as parents you should have prepared them for that). I mean I look it as would I do that to my sister and her fiance? They'll be coming to stay with me this summer for vacation, and I am working of course. I cannot imagine telling them "Ok your curfew is 11, you need to be at home and in your room by then!" or some bullshiat. Sure I suppose it is my right since "My roof, my rules," but it would just seem extremely dickish and arbitrary. Now, if they were out partying late and came home being loud at 3am, I'd say "Hey guys, don't do that, I have to work tomorrow." But I wouldn't set some arbitrary rule without good reason.

It just really strikes me that these parents have serious control issues. Daughter may be an entitled brat, but that doesn't mean being a controlling douche is the proper response.

Two sons, put the career on hold two weeks before the first was born. Fast forward eleven years and the younger one is almost there. Fortunately I have a great wife. Not everyone can do this. Meh, she can't cook anyway. Wish me luck trying to GTFBW tho. Any rate- so far it's the best thing. But hell yah, they'll be out on their ass if they put themselves there.

Same thing. Most of the public debt is held by student borrowers today. Anyone can go get a free student loan nowadays for the asking regardless of credit worthiness or any other factor.

You have worthless educators like Phoenix University and dozens of others being a conduit for fraud that only benefits the employees of these low life enterprises. And many of them include community colleges who sign up students for four year degrees who can't even pass a GED test.

Then, they contract with text book publishers who are also scoundrels and take their share of the loot. The whole thing is a scam.

Not every kid needs to or is able to get a college degree. But this industry that has grown around giving loans to people who can't pay them and only benefits the little peckerwoods in tight circles of academia is an obvious sham.