Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Mastodon: Crack The Skye- Still great. Actually, rather unfortunately, I lost my cd of this (it may have been stolen at the carwash- that was the last place I saw it, but I thoroughly doubt those dudes are Mastodon fans), so I hadn't had much chance to listen to it until I burned myself a new copy. In the metal world, no one does layering like Mastodon, and it really must be turned up pretty loud to get all the little interesting parts. That, and I'm deaf.

Beastie Boys: Check Your Head Remastered B-Sides- Perhaps more than any other record (save the Descendents' Somery and the Minor Threat record), Check Your Head defined my teenage/highschool years. It was even in my cd player when I picked Dawn up for our first date (cute). I had tapes of tapes of bootlegs with these B-sides on them, so it brings back a lot of memories of causing/getting into trouble. And, more philosophically, it really inspired me to play music and broaden my horizons. These came as a free lossless download when I ordered the CYH Remastered vinyl, so I can finally replace my 96k mp3's that were among the first digital audio files I ever encountered.

Wire: Chairs Missing- Bigger fan of Pink Flag, but I Am The Fly is a brilliant song, as the limeys might say. I've already listened to the record twice today. Interestingly enough, the last time I listened to it, according to iTunes was exactly 364 days ago. Also of note- if you want to remaster your records and have them sound great- get the Wire dudes to do it. I don't know how, but they have the best sounding remastered catalog ever, especially considering they recorded it originally in the late 70's with ultra-low budget punk gear. Even Jimmy Page can't remaster that well.

Godspeed You! Black Emperor: Lift Your Skinny Fists Like Antennas To Heaven- This is some serious shit. I kid you not, I had to turn off the lights and light a candle to listen to this. And it worked. Aaaaatttttmmmmmooooosssssppppphhhhheeeeerrrrreeeee.
The record kind of sneaks into your brain like a parasite and feeds on your nerves, and you're none the wiser. The 3rd "movement," entitled Sleep, WILL fuck your shit up.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

"It's the castration of American, and Obama's the kingpin."
followed by something about his citizenship that I couldn't hear, then:
"It's the breakup of the family fabric."
and
"God bless America- we need it. Have a happy Holy Thursday and Good Friday..."
Kinda tame, but funny in a crazy nonsensical way.

I've given Pandora Radio months of chances. I've put my faith in the science of music- only to find out there is no such thing. And I've been forced to come up with only one conclusion-
dreadfully, Yahoo! Launch Radio is better.
Yuck. I feel like one of those assholes contending that "The Zune really is better than the iPod!" out of a sense of misguided contrarianism.
I don't even know if the Yahoo (fuck exclamation points) radio thing is even still around. Last I checked it didn't support Macs OR Firefox, which is beyond retarded, so I've boycotted it ever since. But it did (does?) have a few things going for it- actually, one major thing: the intelligent "Don't Ever Play This Again" button. Say I type in "Nirvana" (because I'm grunge) and it plays Lithium... immediately followed by Pearl Jam or Pudddddle of Mudddd or some other ridiculous shit, I click the button, the software learns I only like Nirvana and not horrible shit, and the world is happy.
But science gets in the way over at Pandora, and unfortunately I'm convinced that science gets in the way of music. Pandora breaks down the songs (as opposed to the artists) into formulas- minor key songs, rock-and-roll instrumentation songs, songs with "excessive vamping" (I didn't know what that meant either). And then it mathematically combines all these variables, and I get... Radiohead.
All the time, with the boring-ass Radiohead. I would never tell it to seach for Radiohead's acoustic b-sides and whatever else. The one positive aspect was that I was able to come up with a new term for Thom Yorke- Downs-Elf. It's pretty self-explanatory, and I apologize to the Downs- community, but it had to be said.
And just because I like Jay-Z DOS NOT MEAN I WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH 2-PAC. Sure, I can say "Don't play this song for a month" to Pandora, but what about the 5000 other posthumous 2-Pac songs, or the rest of the extensive Downs-Elf catalog? [Note- This just happend as I was typing- I thumbs-downed a Downs-Elf song, and 6 songs later it plays Creep. Arrrgh.]
That's all I've got, but at least I might have managed to offend the Downs-Syndrome Community (sorry), White Kid Wannabe Gangsters (not at all sorry), and people who like "Artistic, Creative, Mindblowing" music (hahahahaa, fucking Radiohead fans are the WORST).
And on a positive note, at least it's playing Straight Outta Compton at the moment, though I'm sure my joy will be short-lived.