Seattle vs. Denver: Pre-Super Bowl smackdown

By By SCOTT SUNDE AND STEPHEN COHEN

on January 24, 2014 8:55 AM

Here's Denver. It's hard for people in Seattle to work up lots of hate toward Denver. It's not San Francisco or Portland. Seattle should like the "Mile-High City" nickname as you will see. The bad thing: Denver is rarely in Seattle's thoughts, except for now. It's Back East. Live in the left-hand corner of the country long enough and you think Denver is next to Chicago and an easy drive from New York. Denver Metro Convention & Visitors Bureau less

Here's Denver. It's hard for people in Seattle to work up lots of hate toward Denver. It's not San Francisco or Portland. Seattle should like the "Mile-High City" nickname as you will see. The bad thing: Denver ... more

Here's Denver. It's hard for people in Seattle to work up...photo-2218165.78397 - |ucfirst

Here is Seattle. (Note to people in Denver: That's a waterfront. And yes, water.) It's a remote and often-gray place. And about the nickname. We try many and nothing seems to stick: "Jet City," "Emerald City" and the worst, "Metronatural." Next up: "Bigger and Better than Portland and Not Foreign Like Vancouver." less

Here is Seattle. (Note to people in Denver: That's a waterfront. And yes, water.) It's a remote and often-gray place. And about the nickname. We try many and nothing seems to stick: "Jet City," "Emerald City" ... more

Photo: (Joshua Trujillo/seattlepi.com)

Here is Seattle. (Note to people in Denver: That's a...photo-1562305.78397 - |ucfirst

Let's start by looking at each state. We are led here by seattlepi.com sports guy Stephen Cohen, who moved to Denver as a child and is a graduate of one of the state's insititutions of higher learning. Colorado, of course, had all those mines. And farms. And ranches. There was some thought to calling the place "Idaho." Man, that was a close one, Colorado. If you had taken that name, Washington's neighbor to the east would be named "Russet" or perhaps "Whitemen's Land."

Let's start by looking at each state. We are led here by seattlepi.com sports guy Stephen Cohen, who moved to Denver as a child and is a graduate of one of the state's insititutions of higher learning.

Let's start by looking at each state. We are led here by...photo-5770902.78397 - |ucfirst

Washington didn't exactly break a sweat to pick a name. But it did give the world the town George, Washington. And there is a decades-old grump about Washington, D.C. People call it "The Other Washington," but not in a nice way. And those folks didn't call dibs on the name. People came here to pull what they could from the sea and to cut everything they saw in the forest. And then came the apples.

Washington didn't exactly break a sweat to pick a name. But it did give the world the town George, Washington. And there is a decades-old grump about Washington, D.C. People call it "The Other Washington," but

Colorado has the Rockies. (Mountains and baseball team.) Depending on how you score it, it's not even close with Washington. The state has 53 14,000-foot peaks. Washington has one. On size and number, Colorado wins this one in a romp less

Colorado has the Rockies. (Mountains and baseball team.) Depending on how you score it, it's not even close with Washington. The state has 53 14,000-foot peaks. Washington has one. On size and number, Colorado ... more

But if we awarded on style points, Washington would at least be in the game. Washington's mountains rise close to places at sea level. So they look damn good. The Olympics, short enough that Colorado people would dismiss them as mere foothills, sprout right out of Puget Sound. Mount Rainier, our tallest, also has that nice volcanic dome. Beautiful but dangerous, reminding people that the day will come when molten death comes a-calling. less

But if we awarded on style points, Washington would at least be in the game. Washington's mountains rise close to places at sea level. So they look damn good. The Olympics, short enough that Colorado people ... more

Photo: Dan Callister, Getty Images

But if we awarded on style points, Washington would at least be in...photo-4724954.78397 - |ucfirst

Mountains mean snow and skiing. Colorado has lots of both. But they are, well, darn snotty about the whole thing as if snow and skiing elsewhere doesn't really count. Get over it. An accident of geology and meteorology is nothing to brag about. less

Mountains mean snow and skiing. Colorado has lots of both. But they are, well, darn snotty about the whole thing as if snow and skiing elsewhere doesn't really count. Get over it. An accident of geology and ... more

Washington has snow, too, except for this winter. Spots in the state routinely record the highest annual snow fall in the lower 48, thanks to a damp marine climate meets elevation. But here's the thing: Washington snow falls, thaws, freezes and gets rained on. Sometimes that happens all in one day on the slopes. So the snow is often, well, different and know as "Cascade Concrete." less

Washington has snow, too, except for this winter. Spots in the state routinely record the highest annual snow fall in the lower 48, thanks to a damp marine climate meets elevation. But here's the thing: ... more

Photo: Dan DeLong, Seattle Post-Intelligencer

Washington has snow, too, except for this winter. Spots in the...photo-888362.78397 - |ucfirst

But there's this: People in Washington know Gore-Tex and a big blue tarp are essential. There is lots to do in the outdoors but often in the rain

But there's this: People in Washington know Gore-Tex and a big blue tarp are essential. There is lots to do in the outdoors but often in the rain

But there's this: People in Washington know Gore-Tex and a big...photo-4677274.78397 - |ucfirst

Enough with avoiding the subject. Let's talk cities and sports history. Denver Broncos: six Super Bowls, two victories. Colorado Rockies: one World Series, no victories. Colorado Avalanche: Two Stanley Cups.

Enough with avoiding the subject. Let's talk cities and sports history. Denver Broncos: six Super Bowls, two victories. Colorado Rockies: one World Series, no victories. Colorado Avalanche: Two Stanley Cups.

And Seattle? One Super Bowl, no victory. No World Series. There was a Stanley Cup, when Woodrow Wilson was in the White House and the team folded 90 years ago And, of course, there was the 1979 NBA championship -- by a team that changed its name and moved. That means Seattle's fate is too lose, perhaps for divine retribution for those forests that were clear-cut and rivers dammed. Or it could mean that Seattle is due. Really, really due.

And Seattle? One Super Bowl, no victory. No World Series. There was a Stanley Cup, when Woodrow Wilson was in the White House and the team folded 90 years ago And, of course, there was the 1979 NBA championship

And Seattle? One Super Bowl, no victory. No World Series. There...photo-3995839.78397 - |ucfirst

No sports history is complete without a look at sports larceny. Seattle tried, and failed recently, to steal the Sacramento Kings and even hoped the Phoenix Coyotes of the NHL would become perhaps the Seattle Salmon. No luck. Jilted. And don't even get Seattle started on the Pilots: one and done and off to become the Milwaukee Brewers. And never, ever mention the brief time the Seahawks moved to Southern California. less

No sports history is complete without a look at sports larceny. Seattle tried, and failed recently, to steal the Sacramento Kings and even hoped the Phoenix Coyotes of the NHL would become perhaps the Seattle ... more

Photo: Jed Jacobsohn, Getty Images

No sports history is complete without a look at sports larceny....photo-4419010.78397 - |ucfirst

Now it's time to look at city sports idols. John Elway fits the bill for Denver. He won two Super Bowls, then stuck around to run car dealerships and now the Broncos. Here's the odd thing: He was born in Port Angeles, Wash., and spent part of his childhood in Aberdeen and Pullman, where his father coached. His dad played football at Washington state, and his first wife was a high school swimming star in Tacoma. It seems doubtful he has a "Washington Native" bumper sticker, however. less

Now it's time to look at city sports idols. John Elway fits the bill for Denver. He won two Super Bowls, then stuck around to run car dealerships and now the Broncos. Here's the odd thing: He was born in Port ... more

Now it's time to look at city sports idols. John Elway fits...photo-2857867.78397 - |ucfirst

Two years makes this guy an idol? Every third person in Seattle seems to be wearing a Russell Wilson jersey. People want their sons to be like him and their daughters to marry someone like him. He's smart and talented and devotes his off-hours to visiting sick kids. He is religious but in an easy-to-handle way for one of America's least-churched cities. He's no Tebow, Denver. Wilson is almost too good to be true. Maybe he doesn't recycle, owns a salmon farm or, gasp, votes Republican. less

Two years makes this guy an idol? Every third person in Seattle seems to be wearing a Russell Wilson jersey. People want their sons to be like him and their daughters to marry someone like him. He's smart and ... more

Photo: Ted S. Warren, AP

Two years makes this guy an idol? Every third person in Seattle...photo-5745598.78397 - |ucfirst

Who's really hot? Richard Sherman, whose interview went viral and keeps going. In some ways, the Seahawks defensive back is a lot like many Seattle residents: from Southern California, graduated from a brainiac California university (Stanford) and moved to Seattle for a good-paying job. Still, Seattle folks are usually a reserved bunch who have been known to pull their cars over and cry when someone honks at them. Perhaps Sherman represents the person Seattle wants to be -- they guy who jumps up from his cubicle and shouts, "This app rocks! Suck it, Silicon Valley." less

Who's really hot? Richard Sherman, whose interview went viral and keeps going. In some ways, the Seahawks defensive back is a lot like many Seattle residents: from Southern California, graduated from a brainiac ... more

Peyton Manning is so hot he is almost burning down the country. Extract the Pacific Northwest, and the whole country wants him to win the Big One at age 37. Everybody but Warren Buffett had forgotten about Omaha until Manning. But the best thing: The guy can laugh at himself. Check out the next slide. less

Peyton Manning is so hot he is almost burning down the country. Extract the Pacific Northwest, and the whole country wants him to win the Big One at age 37. Everybody but Warren Buffett had forgotten about ... more

Photo: Associated Press

Peyton Manning is so hot he is almost burning down the country....photo-5649215.78397 - |ucfirst

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Let's get down to weather basics. Denver boasts about 300 days of sunshine. And it has what most of the country considers real weather: snow, thunderstorms. And you know where this is going.

Let's get down to weather basics. Denver boasts about 300 days of sunshine. And it has what most of the country considers real weather: snow, thunderstorms. And you know where this is going.

Seattle gets snow -- rarely and with great panic. Locals cannot drive in it. Blame all the hills, the lack of snow-removal equipment or the California-transplants -- more on that later -- but Seattle people pillage grocery store shelves at snow warnings, then abandon their cars as soon as it starts to fall.

Seattle gets snow -- rarely and with great panic. Locals cannot drive in it. Blame all the hills, the lack of snow-removal equipment or the California-transplants -- more on that later -- but Seattle people

You can tell a lot about a place by who isn't liked. Denver folks don't think much of Californians and like to think: "This used to be a nice place until Californians arrived." Texans aren't loved, either. But then where are they outside the Lone Star State? Being a Colorado native is such a big deal that people announce it on their bumpers. All they need is "Native" with mountains in the background. less

You can tell a lot about a place by who isn't liked. Denver folks don't think much of Californians and like to think: "This used to be a nice place until Californians arrived." Texans aren't loved, either. But ... more

Photo: Fotolia

You can tell a lot about a place by who isn't liked. Denver...photo-2863226.78397 - |ucfirst

Seattle's got Denver's back on the whole California thing. Especially San Francisco. For years, long-time Seattle residents have blamed "Californication" on high real estate prices, gang violence and traffic jams. And watch out when a broadcaster fresh from Sacramento calls the freeways "The 5" and "The 90." And Texas? Not so much. But one Texan, yes. You still see this bumper sticker: "Somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot." And it's been six years. Get over it. less

Seattle's got Denver's back on the whole California thing. Especially San Francisco. For years, long-time Seattle residents have blamed "Californication" on high real estate prices, gang violence and traffic ... more

Photo: Marcio Jose Sanchez, Associated Press

Seattle's got Denver's back on the whole California...photo-5667081.78397 - |ucfirst

You can also judge a town by its neighbors. Seattle has Tacoma, where people are resentful and refer to the "Tacoma-Seattle area." Seattle people are snotty enough to think they are all over the Tacoma rivalry.

You can also judge a town by its neighbors. Seattle has Tacoma, where people are resentful and refer to the "Tacoma-Seattle area." Seattle people are snotty enough to think they are all over the Tacoma rivalry.

Photo: PHIL H. WEBBER, Seattlepi.com File

You can also judge a town by its neighbors. Seattle has Tacoma,...photo-1716403.78397 - |ucfirst

Denver had Boulder, which, among other things, celebrates April 20 by a mass pot smoke-in. Denver wins on points here.

Denver had Boulder, which, among other things, celebrates April 20 by a mass pot smoke-in. Denver wins on points here.

Photo: Chris Hondros, Getty Images

Denver had Boulder, which, among other things, celebrates April 20...photo-4493777.78397 - |ucfirst

A city has to have something to make fun of. Seattle has Portland, You can't put fluoride in the drinking water or you can't legally pump your own gas there. People in Seattle think “Portlandia” (pictured above) is a documentary and like to say that Portland is a place where young people go to retire. Of course, Seattle used to be the hot place until some New York writer's plane stopped in Portland. Envy? Perhaps. less

A city has to have something to make fun of. Seattle has Portland, You can't put fluoride in the drinking water or you can't legally pump your own gas there. People in Seattle think “Portlandia” (pictured ... more

A city has to have something to make fun of. Seattle has Portland,...photo-4667408.78397 - |ucfirst

We hear that some people in Denver like to make fun of Wyoming. Seattle people probably wouldn't get the jokes, unless it involved Wyoming's favorite son Dick Cheney.

We hear that some people in Denver like to make fun of Wyoming. Seattle people probably wouldn't get the jokes, unless it involved Wyoming's favorite son Dick Cheney.

Photo: Matt Champlin, Getty Images/Flickr Open

We hear that some people in Denver like to make fun of Wyoming....photo-5064108.78397 - |ucfirst

And who hates Seattle? Much of the state, especially the part east of the Cascades pretty much thinks the city is a dangerous, daft place with enough people to approve radical ideas. Stop someone like this farmer in Garfield, Wash., and he might use "206" -- Seattle's area code -- like a swear word. "There's a 206 solution for ya." less

And who hates Seattle? Much of the state, especially the part east of the Cascades pretty much thinks the city is a dangerous, daft place with enough people to approve radical ideas. Stop someone like this ... more

Photo: Eva Hershaw

And who hates Seattle? Much of the state, especially the part east...photo-704785.78397 - |ucfirst

A bunch of Colorado counties went one better last fall and tried to secede over such issues as regulation of the oil and gas industry. Perhaps it would have gone better if backs had chosen "Baja Wyoming" instead of "North Colorado" less

A bunch of Colorado counties went one better last fall and tried to secede over such issues as regulation of the oil and gas industry. Perhaps it would have gone better if backs had chosen "Baja Wyoming" ... more

Photo: AP

A bunch of Colorado counties went one better last fall and tried to...photo-4461035.78397 - |ucfirst

You can't help but wonder whether legalizing pot pushed rural Colorado residents over the edge. Colorado and Denver voted for pot as did Seattle and Washington. Colorado scores for getting it stores up first. The baseball season will be well underway before that happens in Washington.

You can't help but wonder whether legalizing pot pushed rural Colorado residents over the edge. Colorado and Denver voted for pot as did Seattle and Washington. Colorado scores for getting it stores up first.

But give Seattle credit for its annual Hempfest, the open and annual pot celebration. Last August, Seattle cops handed out Doritos to those who attended. "It's beautiful man," one attendee said. It's also been a long strange trip for Seattle. Twenty-five years ago, you couldn't get hard liquor in free-standing bars. (So the city's pancake houses had cocktail lounges.) And the state sold liquor in stores Stalin would have approved of. Now, you can buy booze at Safeway and soon dope at a corner store.

But give Seattle credit for its annual Hempfest, the open and annual pot celebration. Last August, Seattle cops handed out Doritos to those who attended. "It's beautiful man," one attendee said. It's also been

Instead of good movie. How about bad ones? So bad you can't look away. "Red Dawn" was set in Colorado. Talk about your anti-Communist, anti-immigration, anti-gun control bowl of deliciousness. Wolverines!

Instead of good movie. How about bad ones? So bad you can't look away. "Red Dawn" was set in Colorado. Talk about your anti-Communist, anti-immigration, anti-gun control bowl of deliciousness. Wolverines!

Instead of good movie. How about bad ones? So bad you can't...photo-3766529.78397 - |ucfirst

"Red Dawn" apparently cried out for a remake. So one was in 2012, and it was set in Spokane. The best part is that this time North Korea invades. Giving Dennis Rodman a cameo could have helped at the box office. Give Colorado the win for setting the bar first and so low that you can always say, "Well, that movie sucked. But it was no 'Red Dawn.' " less

"Red Dawn" apparently cried out for a remake. So one was in 2012, and it was set in Spokane. The best part is that this time North Korea invades. Giving Dennis Rodman a cameo could have helped at the box ... more

"Red Dawn" apparently cried out for a remake. So one was...photo-3947761.78397 - |ucfirst

TV? Seattle had "Frasier." It was set here and once in a while shot a couple of scenes here. TV shows set in Seattle have a depressing habit of being filmed in British Columbia. Check out "The Killing." We could go all kid show and pit "iCarly" against "Good Luck Charlie." But instead ... less

TV? Seattle had "Frasier." It was set here and once in a while shot a couple of scenes here. TV shows set in Seattle have a depressing habit of being filmed in British Columbia. Check out "The Killing." We ... more

TV? Seattle had "Frasier." It was set here and once in a...photo-4890984.78397 - |ucfirst

Yes, Denver, you have "South Park." Points for being hip, funny and controversial. And it's a cartoon, dude. No need to worry about filming exteriors.

Yes, Denver, you have "South Park." Points for being hip, funny and controversial. And it's a cartoon, dude. No need to worry about filming exteriors.

Yes, Denver, you have "South Park." Points for being hip,...photo-4751683.78397 - |ucfirst

And no city is complete with weird public art. Seattle has lots, including a Lenin statue in its Fremont neighborhood. Fremont also has this Troll. Thankfully it's under a bridge. Someone tell Jabba the Hut we've found his brother. less

And no city is complete with weird public art. Seattle has lots, including a Lenin statue in its Fremont neighborhood. Fremont also has this Troll. Thankfully it's under a bridge. Someone tell Jabba the Hut ... more

And no city is complete with weird public art. Seattle has lots,...photo-3053296.78397 - |ucfirst

Denver International Airport has this statue, "Mustang." A 32-foot blue horse with spooky eyes. Little wonder some locals call it the blue demon horse. You have to wonder, with a little effort, paint and a horn this could have been a unicorn beloved my all.

Denver International Airport has this statue, "Mustang." A 32-foot blue horse with spooky eyes. Little wonder some locals call it the blue demon horse. You have to wonder, with a little effort, paint and a horn

Denver International Airport has this statue, "Mustang."...photo-5772502.78397 - |ucfirst

Time for commerce. Seattle has given the world Boeing, REI (a place Denver certainly understands), Microsoft, Starbucks and Amazon, among others. Seattle's Super Bowl pick ought to be Amazon. Talk about world domination, plus you can order a big nose that gives you soap in the shower. It's a great country. less

Time for commerce. Seattle has given the world Boeing, REI (a place Denver certainly understands), Microsoft, Starbucks and Amazon, among others. Seattle's Super Bowl pick ought to be Amazon. Talk about world ... more

Photo: Amazon

Time for commerce. Seattle has given the world Boeing, REI (a place...photo-5241377.78397 - |ucfirst

It's got to be Coors in Denver. Sure, the city has all sorts of craft beers. But you can't watch a sporting event without seeing a Coors commercial. Plus, no one is going to say, "Hey, since you're going into the kitchen, can you get me a caramel macchiato?" during the Super Bowl. Long ago, Coors used to be a great mystery to the eastern half of the country where you couldn't buy it. Not anymore. less

It's got to be Coors in Denver. Sure, the city has all sorts of craft beers. But you can't watch a sporting event without seeing a Coors commercial. Plus, no one is going to say, "Hey, since you're going into ... more

It's got to be Coors in Denver. Sure, the city has all sorts...photo-4899293.78397 - |ucfirst

And finally, which town has given in to filthy lucre the most. Denver went with Invesco Field at Mile High. Now it's Sports Authority Field at Mile High. At least the folks threw a sop to the old name.

And finally, which town has given in to filthy lucre the most. Denver went with Invesco Field at Mile High. Now it's Sports Authority Field at Mile High. At least the folks threw a sop to the old name.

Photo: Doug Pensinger, Getty Images

And finally, which town has given in to filthy lucre the most....photo-5745539.78397 - |ucfirst

This was briefly Seahawks Stadium, then Qwest Field, then CenturyLink when one phone company swallowed up another. It rests on the graveyard of the Kingdome. Seattle people like to dance on that. The bright side: People in Seattle call the new stadium with CLink. less

This was briefly Seahawks Stadium, then Qwest Field, then CenturyLink when one phone company swallowed up another. It rests on the graveyard of the Kingdome. Seattle people like to dance on that. The bright ... more

Here's Denver. It's hard for people in Seattle to work up lots of hate toward Denver. It's not San Francisco or Portland. Seattle should like the "Mile-High City" nickname as you will see. The bad thing: Denver is rarely in Seattle's thoughts, except for now. It's Back East. Live in the left-hand corner of the country long enough and you think Denver is next to Chicago and an easy drive from New York. Denver Metro Convention & Visitors Bureau less

Here's Denver. It's hard for people in Seattle to work up lots of hate toward Denver. It's not San Francisco or Portland. Seattle should like the "Mile-High City" nickname as you will see. The bad thing: Denver ... more