Cary Elwes acts scared in Saw, but how about when he’s in the Audience — eyes open or shut? ”Eyes wide open,” he said on the red carpet Oct. 25. ”Always. Those are my kind of movies.”

NAMESAKES

Last week, Kate Winslet was ridden by Jose Santos. Not like that, silly! Winslet is a 3-year-old horse named for the Titanic actress. The horse’s former owner learned English by watching the movie. The filly ran her first U.S. race Oct. 23 at the Ticonderoga Stakes in Belmont, N.Y., but sadly, Kate, who started the day at 5-1 odds, came in sixth. We hope her heart will go on.

APOLOGIES

The Dave Matthews Band issued a statement on their website Oct. 22 about an Aug. 8 incident in which their bus driver allegedly dumped 800 pounds of human waste from a bridge into the Chicago River — and onto a tour boat carrying 109 people. ”If we were the responsible party, we offer our deepest apologies,” the band said. It is donating $50,000 to both the Friends of the Chicago River and the Chicago Parks Dept., and is trying to track down boat passengers to ”make things right.” The band still faces a $70,000 pollution lawsuit filed by the Illinois attorney general.

COURTS

One down… Trouble-prone rocker Courtney Love, 40, pleaded guilty Oct. 20 in NYC to disorderly conduct charges stemming from a March incident in which she threw a microphone stand during a show, striking fan Gregory Burgett, 24, in the head. In exchange for her plea, Love was granted a conditional discharge: She must attend a drug-treatment program, remain drug-free, and commit no crimes for a year, after which her record will be sealed. Additionally, Love must pay Burgett $2,236 to cover medical expenses. The singer could not be reached for comment…. Christian Newton and Casey McAdams, the proprietors of a fake Nick Nolte website, received a cease-and-desist letter Oct. 18 from the actor’s lawyer. The website, nicknoltediary.com, received attention after an Oct. 8 entry in which ”Nolte” described getting into a fender bender with Rosanna Arquette, a story that was picked up and run as fact by several news organizations. The site has been altered to clearly read, ”NOT Nick Nolte’s Diary,” and the pair has added a legal disclaimer. Reps for Nolte had no comment, but Newton says, ”We always felt it was absurd enough that no one would think it was real. We always hoped in our minds that Nick Nolte would find it amusing, but that may have been a stretch.”… A former staffer at CBS’ Robbery Homicide Division filed suit Oct. 22 in L.A. against Tom Sizemore, 42, claiming sexual harassment and wrongful termination. Loretta Jody Miller alleges that Sizemore subjected her to a wide variety of offensive behaviors (including ”engaging in sexual conduct with prostitutes” while Miller was present) and fired her when she complained. She is seeking unspecified damages. Reps for Sizemore could not be reached for comment…. Catherine Zeta-Jones, 35, filed suit Oct. 21 in L.A. against the Spice House, ”Reno’s Friendliest Topless Cabaret,” for the unauthorized use of a photo of the actress on its website in October 2003. She is seeking damages of $75,000. Spice House reps called the suit ”abusive,” saying the photograph was on the website for less than a month and was removed upon the receipt of a cease-and-desist letter from Zeta-Jones’ lawyers.