Gargantua and Pantagruel eBook

The enemies, after that they were awaked, seeing on
one side the fire in the camp, and on the other the
inundation of the urinal deluge, could not tell what
to say nor what to think. Some said that it was
the end of the world and the final judgment, which
ought to be by fire. Others again thought that
the sea-gods, Neptune, Proteus, Triton, and the rest
of them, did persecute them, for that indeed they
found it to be like sea-water and salt.

O who were able now condignly to relate how Pantagruel
did demean himself against the three hundred giants!
O my Muse, my Calliope, my Thalia, inspire me at
this time, restore unto me my spirits; for this is
the logical bridge of asses! Here is the pitfall,
here is the difficulty, to have ability enough to
express the horrible battle that was fought.
Ah, would to God that I had now a bottle of the best
wine that ever those drank who shall read this so
veridical history!

Chapter 2.XXIX.

How Pantagruel discomfited the three hundred giants
armed with free-stone, and Loupgarou their captain.

The giants, seeing all their camp drowned, carried
away their king Anarchus upon their backs as well
as they could out of the fort, as Aeneas did to his
father Anchises, in the time of the conflagration of
Troy. When Panurge perceived them, he said to
Pantagruel, Sir, yonder are the giants coming forth
against you; lay on them with your mast gallantly,
like an old fencer; for now is the time that you must
show yourself a brave man and an honest. And
for our part we will not fail you. I myself will
kill to you a good many boldly enough; for why, David
killed Goliath very easily; and then this great lecher,
Eusthenes, who is stronger than four oxen, will not
spare himself. Be of good courage, therefore,
and valiant; charge amongst them with point and edge,
and by all manner of means. Well, said Pantagruel,
of courage I have more than for fifty francs, but let
us be wise, for Hercules first never undertook against
two. That is well cacked, well scummered, said
Panurge; do you compare yourself with Hercules?
You have, by G—­, more strength in your
teeth, and more scent in your bum, than ever Hercules
had in all his body and soul. So much is a man
worth as he esteems himself. Whilst they spake
those words, behold! Loupgarou was come with
all his giants, who, seeing Pantagruel in a manner
alone, was carried away with temerity and presumption,
for hopes that he had to kill the good man.
Whereupon he said to his companions the giants, You
wenchers of the low country, by Mahoom! if any of
you undertake to fight against these men here, I will
put you cruelly to death. It is my will that
you let me fight single. In the meantime you
shall have good sport to look upon us.