A Sanitaria Springs Story

By Ryan Bartlett

Kale looked down at the three freshmen girls floating in the water below his lifeguards chair then looked over his shoulder at Alec as he headed for the bathroom. While to Kale’s way of thinking Chase was the
prettiest lifeguard at the pool, he had to agree with the girl’s assessment of Alec’s ass. He thought Alec’s ass was near perfection and blushed at the memory of having bitten one of those firm cheeks a week earlier.

“I’d kick him out of bed only because there’s more room on the floor…”

Kale couldn’t help snorting at the line. It was one of Alec’s favorites and Kale found it delightfully appropriate that one of his admirers had used it. It was also such a boy thing to say; hearing the crude line come out of a girl made it so much funnier.

The girls hadn’t realized Kale could hear them until his snort of laughter. They blushed three shades of red and swam off in a flutter of giggles.

“That’s better,” Alec sighed contentedly a couple of minutes later when he flopped back in his chair beside Kale. “Did I miss anything?”

“Just some of your fans,” said Kale.

“Fans?”

Kale nodded at the trio of girls hanging out in the corner of the pool. They were stealing glances at Alec and giggling like they were at a sleepover.

“Awwww, that’s cute,” Alec laughed.

“Cute! Ha, you should have heard them,” Kale grinned. “They were particularly complimentary of your ass.”

“Awww, don’t tease them. It’s not fair to advertise a product that’s off the market.”

“Hey, I’m just providing them something for the old spank bank. Girls have a spank bank, right?”

“A few minutes ago I would have said I didn’t know but after hearing them talk about your ass I’m going to say yes,” Kale grinned.

“Back in a minute,” said Alec as he jumped in the water.

Kale shook his head and whispered to himself, “Such a show off.”

Alec swam around to the various knots of swimmers. He and Kale were responsible for the kid’s pool and part of their duties included checking on swimmers and making sure they took breaks from the water to avoid cramps. Alec used it as an opportunity to talk to the girls who had been giggling at him since he’d returned from the bathroom.

“Hello ladies,” Alec cooed, flashing them a winning smile. “How are we this afternoon?”

“Fine,” said the blonde.

“I just thought I’d come by and check on you; everyone taking breaks?” He reached up and scratched his head, flexing his bicep and noticed the girls didn’t seem to have any interest.

“Yeah, we’re good,” said one of the brunette girls. “What’s his name, that other life guard, you know, the pretty one.”

“Who, Leafy?” said Alec in surprise. The surprise quickly faded - after all, he thought Kale was pretty so why shouldn’t a bunch of girls?

“His name’s Leafy?” The girls scrunched up their noses collectively.

“Only in certain circles,” Alec grinned. “His name’s Kale Kirkwood.”

“That’s so cute,” the blonde girl gushed. “Does he have a girlfriend?”

Never missing a chance to mess with Kale, Alec sensed an opportunity.

“He did but she just broke up with him, poor guy,” Alec sighed.

“Awwww, that’s so sad,” said one of the brunettes.

“Yeah, he’s really heartbroken,” Alec fanned the flames. “He thought they’d get married one day but she’s going out of state for college and told him she didn’t want to do the long distance thing.”

“What a bitch!” said the blonde.

“I know, right?” Alec agreed. “Me and the other guys have been trying to cheer him up but nothing seems to work. Say, you guys wouldn’t want to help, would you?”

“Us?” said the blonde. “What can we do?”

“Well, Kale’s in charge of swimming lessons and no one’s signed up today. I bet three pretty girls would be a nice distraction from his problems,” said Alec.

“But we already know how to swim,” said one of the brunettes.

“Yeah, but Kale doesn’t know that,” Alec grinned wickedly.

“Where do we sign up?” asked the blonde.

Alec told them where they could find the pool office and the sign-up sheet for lessons then watched the girls climb out of the water. He swam back to the lifeguard station and flopped into his chair with a chuckle.

“What’s so funny?” asked Kale.

“Oh, you know, silly girls,” Alec smiled.

“Hmmm,” Kale nodded his agreement.

The boys continued to watch the pool, keeping a sharp eye for swimmers in distress but it was a beautiful June day and all was calm.

“Hey Kale, you got a minute?” Mr. Howser, the pool manager, called up to Kale.

“Sure, Mr. Howser, what’s up?” asked Kale as he hopped down from his chair. Kale found his boss accompanied the three girls he’d overheard talking about Alec earlier.

“This is Abby, Kara and Molly, they came by my office to sign up for swim lessons,” said Mr. Howser. “Can you take care of it?”

“Sure thing, Mr. Howser,” said Kale.

“That’s my man,” Mr. Howser clapped him on the shoulder. “I’ll just leave you too it.”

“So you guy’s need lessons?” asked Kale when his boss walked away. “Didn’t I see you swimming a few minutes ago?”

“Kara only dog paddles and Molly and me are going out for the swim team when school starts,” said Abby, the blonde, concocting the story on the spot. “Mr. Howser said you could give us some pointers.”

“Ok, let’s get started,” said Kale as he took off his t-shirt. “Ready?”

The girls just giggled at him.

“Right,” said Kale, and he led the girls into the pool.

He started with Kara. If she could only dog paddle then she needed the most work.

“Alright Kara, we’ll start with a basic float,” said Kale. “Lie on your back and just let the water hold you.”

“But won’t I sink?” asked Kara, feigning fear.

“I’ll hold you until you get used to it,” said Kale.

“Ok,” said Kara enthusiastically.

Kale had Kara lie on her back and he used his arms to support her while she floated on the surface of the water. The girl tried to sink but she was actually a strong swimmer and her instincts took over.

“You’re a fast learner, Kara,” said Kale encouragingly as she floated on the water.

“Let me try next,” said Molly.

“I thought you were already a strong swimmer, going out for the team in the fall?” asked Kale.

“Yeah, uh, well, never hurts to practice the basics, right?”

“Um, ok,” Kale agreed, unsure of what was going on. “Lie on your back like Kara did.”

Molly did as Kale instructed and her two friends started giggling. Kale’s first assumption was the girls were flirting with Alec. He looked over his shoulder to see what his friend was doing but Alec just smiled and gave him a thumbs up. The girls giggled again and Kale, not for the first time, said a silent prayer of thanks for being gay. He’d never understand women.

Alec watched Kale work with the girls all afternoon and took particular joy at his utter befuddlement. When their shift came to an end, Alec left Kale to wrap things up with his students and headed for the locker room. He found Sasha and Chase at their lockers changing out of their board shorts.

“There’s a pretty sight,” Alec giggled at the two naked boys.

“Hello Love,” Sasha smiled and kissed him. “Have a good day at the office?”

“Yeah, listen, you guys will love this,” said Alec, looking over his shoulder to make sure Kale wasn’t coming up behind him. “Kale’s got a fan club.”

“What?” Chase giggled.

“I went to the bathroom a few hours ago and when I came back Kale told me this little group of froshy girls had been talking about me while I was gone. So I took off my shirt and got in the water, you know, to give them a little bit of a show…” Alec started.

“As one does,” Sasha rolled his eyes.

“Anyway, I was making the rounds, you know, checking on the kids, and it turns out these girls are hot for our Leafy,” Alec giggled.

“Well, they could already swim, they were showing off for someone,” said Kale.

“Right,” Alec agreed and then the three of them started laughing.

“What’s so funny?” asked Kale with a raised eyebrow.

“Nothing,” his friends replied collectively.

The next morning Kale and Chase arrived for work to find Alec and Sasha waiting for them in the parking lot. The four friends exchanged greetings and then headed to the locker room to put away their backpacks which held their change of clothes for later. When they went into the pool office to clock in, Mr. Howser ran up to Kale.

“Kale, I’m so glad you’re here,” said Mr. Howser.

“Are we late?” asked Kale. He looked at his watch, it read 9:59am, they were actually a minute early.

“No, it’s not that,” said Mr. Howser. “We’ve had a rush on swimming lessons.”

“What?” asked a confused Kale.

“It’s the weirdest thing, twelve girls signed up when I opened the office this morning, look.” Mr. Howser pointed over his shoulder to a group of 12- to -14-year-old girls gathered in a corner waiting for the swimming instructor.

“I can’t handle that many at one time,” Kale exclaimed.

Alec, Sasha and Chase laughed and then Chase kissed Kale on the cheek.

“Have a good day, baby,” said Chase as he and Sasha headed for their station at the adult pool, laughing as they went.

“Don’t worry,” said Mr. Howser. “I broke them into groups; you’ve got six the first two hours and then six for the block after that.”

“Ok, I guess that’ll work,” said Kale.

“We better clock in,” said Alec, barely keeping the smile off his face.

“Why are you guys acting so weird?” asked Kale as Mr. Howser went back to his office and he and Alec punched in.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Alec grinned.

Kale shot him a questioning look but all Alec did was shrug his shoulders and head for the lifeguard station. Kale walked out to the group of girls and introduced himself, “Good morning ladies, my name’s Kale and I’ll be your instructor for the day.”

Kale’s greeting was met with a sea of giggles. He rolled his eyes, wondering what the hell was going on and then took his students to the pool. As with the day before he got the sense that most of his students were already competent swimmers and he quickly became frustrated when their antics at proving they couldn’t swim became more clumsy. It seemed like they took every opportunity they could to grab onto him.

He was just starting in on his second group of students when he spotted Robin, Lucien and Austin trotting over to the lifeguard station. Lucien showed Alec something on his phone and suddenly all four of them were laughing like a pack of hyenas. Kale turned his attention back to his student’s only to encounter more giggling. He looked over his shoulder again and saw Austin had just taken his t-shirt off. He couldn’t blame the girls for their giggles; Austin was certainly one of the prettiest boy’s he’d ever seen. Kale declared a break so his students could recover themselves then he swam over to the lifeguard station.

Lucien pulled out his phone and tapped the screen a few times then handed it over to Kale.

“What the fucking fuck!” Kale exclaimed.

The screen displayed the banner, ‘Hot Boys in the Workplace,’ and below that there was a picture of Kale waist deep in the water. His eyes were wide open as he ran his hand through his wet hair. Water glistened off his pecs and followed a trail down his thin pink bypass scar to his firm abs. The caption read, “I’d drown in those baby blues any day! #KaleatBroomCountyCountryClub.”

“Mr. Vain here,” Robin started as he put his arm around Austin’s shoulder, “was checking to see how many up clicks he had when he discovered a little competition.”

“Oh, God, this can’t be happening,” Kale’s entire body blushed and he covered his face.

“You’re pretty popular,” Lu teased. “It’s only been up since last night and you’ve already got 3,800 up clicks.”

“Crap, all those girls, this is why they’re here,” Kale shook his head.

“It looks like the picture was taken by one of your students yesterday,” Alec giggled.

“This can’t be happening,” Kale continued to blush.

“It’s not so bad, once you get used to it,” Austin grinned.

Kale put his hand back over his eyes and shook his head. Alec started to feel bad for him. Teasing Kale, having a little fun at his expense, was one thing but Alec never liked to see him or, any of his friends, upset.

“Hey guys, go play, I need to talk to Kale for a minute,” said Alec. When the boys were gone, he put his arm around Kale’s shoulder. “Are you alright?”

“Alec, this is so embarrassing,” Kale whispered. “Yesterday, those girls, I thought they were talking about you…”

“Yeah, why is that?” asked Alec.

“Because, they were talking about how hot you are and what a nice ass you had, I didn’t think…”

“You didn’t think they could be talking about you? Why not?”

“I don’t know,” Kale looked down at his feet.

“Kale, you’re beautiful. Chase loves you, Sasha loves you, so do I. I thought you were finally starting to get that through your thick head,” said Alec.

“Ugh, what is Chase going to think?” Kale shook his head in frustration.

“Um, I think he’ll be ok with it,” said Alec, then he nodded towards the adult pool where Robin, Austin and Lucien were sharing the latest addition to “Hot Boy’s in the Workplace,” with Sasha and Chase. All of them were laughing hysterically.

“God damn it,” Kale swore.

“Alright, you’ve gotten all the sympathy you’re going to get out of me, pretty boy. Your public awaits,” Alec laughed and pushed Kale in the pool.

Kale glared at Alec when he broke the surface but Alec admonished him, “Get going, your students are waiting.”

“Hmpf,” Kale grunted as he turned and swam back to his giggling students.

By the end of the day Kale was exhausted and overwhelmed by his experience. The girls kept bumping into him and making excuses to touch him. They giggled at everything he said and watching his friends roll with laughter every time he looked at them had taken its toll. By the time he got to the locker room at the end of the day all he wanted to do was go home. Chase recognized the look on his boyfriend’s face and offered what comfort he could.

“Awww you poor thing,” said Chase as he put his arms around Kale and drew him into a hug.

“It’s not funny,” Kale grumbled.

“Come on, it’s kinda funny,” Chase rocked him in his arms.

“I wish you were on my side with this,” Kale sighed.

“Kale, honey, I am on your side, I just think it’s nice to see you getting the credit you deserve,” said Chase.

“Credit, what credit?” asked Kale, puzzled.

“Come on, you know how self-conscious you are, especially about this,” said Chase, stroking Kale’s scar. “But this whole situation is an affirmation of everything I’ve been telling you: you’re gorgeous.”

“Ah Chase, you’re my boyfriend, you have to say that,” Kale blushed.

“I say it because it’s true,” Chase pecked him on the lips. “And it looks like thousands of little girls agree with me.”

“Come on, can we just go home?” Kale rolled his eyes.

“Sure thing sweetie,” Chase giggled and gave him a playful swat on the butt.

“So did you boys have a good day?” asked Judge Kirkwood at dinner that night.

“Yeah Dad, Mom got me all signed up for football camp,” said Jamie, excitedly.

“That’s good, it should really help you improve your game,” said the Judge.

“I’m going to need some new gear,” said Jamie.

“We’ll take care of that before you go,” said Mrs. Kirkwood.

“How about you Robin, what did you get up to today?” asked the Judge.

“Oh, me and the guys swung by the club for a while this morning then spent the afternoon hunting for parts for the van,” Robin smiled.

“You boys and that van! Do you really think you’ll get it running?” asked Mrs. Kirkwood.

“I think so. It’s really not in that bad of shape, it’s just old and needs a lot of new parts that are kind of hard to find,” Robin explained.

“You’re quiet tonight, Kale,” Judge Kirkwood noted.

“He’s just having trouble adjusting to his celebrity status,” Robin teased.

“Shut up, Robbie,” Kale threatened.

“What’s this?” asked Mrs. Kirkwood.

“Here, I’ll show you,” Robin grinned then produced his phone. A few seconds later it was being passed around the dining table.

“Dad, you’re a judge, isn’t there a law or something that can make them take that stupid picture down?” Kale whined.

“Well, you’re still under 18 but it’s not pornography so that’s out. You said the picture was taken while you were at work, I think that puts it in the public domain. That comment was a bit…disturbing but there’s really nothing we can do about it…sorry son,” said the Judge.

“Yeah, having a perv want to make out with my butt is real flattering, not to mention at work today all these giggling girls were rubbing up on me while I was trying to give them swimming lessons,” said Kale.

“What’s this about girls?” asked Jamie curiously.

“Oh a bunch of girls signed up for swimming lessons after they saw that picture,” Kale pouted.

“How cute,” Mrs. Kirkwood smiled at her oldest boy.

“Ugh, I’m going up to my room,” said Kale.

“Hey, Kale, can me and Scotty catch a ride to the club with you in the morning?” asked Jamie.

“Fine, but he needs to be here and you need to be ready when I leave. I’ve gotta pick up Chase, I don’t have time to pick up Scotty too,” said Kale.

“Don’t worry, he’ll be here,” Jamie assured him.

The next morning when Kale got to work he was greeted by another group of giggling tweens waiting to take swimming lessons with the country club’s celebrity instructor. Kale sighed his resignation but hopped today would be better. At least a boy had signed up for lessons and Kale hoped the kid would help take some of the attention off his shoulders. Sadly that wasn’t the case as the boy turned out to be as bad as the girls with his blushing, giggling and excuses for touching Kale.

Jamie only went to the club for one reason, to check out girls. He and Scotty had been planning to ride their bikes out to Curt Wyman’s house that day but Jamie changed the plans when he heard about Kale’s predicament. A clever boy, Jamie suspected this situation might work out to his advantage. Evidently girls thought Kale was hot and Jamie figured, hey, I look just like him, maybe I can catch some of the runoff.

“This is a really stupid plan,” said Scotty, when they got in the water that morning.

“It’s brilliant,” said Jamie. “Think about it, all those girls over there are in our grade and they’re taking lessons from Kale because they think he’s hot, right?”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have believed it if you hadn’t shown me that picture but they clearly like him,” Scotty agreed.

“And I look just like him, don’t I?”

“True, you’re mini-Kale,” Scotty agreed.

“The girls will realize there’s an army of them and just one Kale but when they recognize me I’ll draw some of the action,” Jamie reasoned.

The boys swam around for a while and Scotty had to admit, it wasn’t a terrible plan. Some of the girls in the swimming class did seem to be taking a hard look between Kale and Jamie. However, there was just one problem. Once they’d signed up for Kale’s class they were committed to it so they couldn’t leave to flirt with Jamie and Scotty.

The boys passed their time talking to Robin, Lucien and the Hamster when they showed up around noon but lost interest in their buddies when some girls Jamie and Scotty recognized from school showed up.

“Sorry,” Jamie apologized then licked his lips and slowly worked the lotion into her supple skin. It was sensory overload for a boy still just shy of his fourteenth birthday and his body began to respond without him even noticing it.

“That’s good,” said Stacy as she started to roll onto her back. “Thanks, Jamie.”

“Oh, you’re welcome,” said Jamie, as he stood up. He looked down at Stacy and couldn’t help but notice the disgusted look on her face.

“Ew Jamie, gross,” Stacy sneered.

“What?” Jamie followed her eyes and realized he had a boner. “Oh God, I’m so sorry Stacy, it just happened.”

“Maybe you should just go,” Stacy suggested.

Kale was growing increasingly annoyed with his students. He knew he wasn’t a funny person and he couldn’t figure out why all these girls thought everything he said was worth giggling at. He was on the edge of blowing his top when he saw Jamie run away from some girl, heading towards the locker room. It was the perfect excuse to call for a break, the little dude looked like he was going to cry and as Robin hadn’t seen what happened, it fell to Kale to comfort his brother.

“Ok, class, we’re going to take a ten minute break, those of you who really can’t swim,” said Kale, figuring there was no need to pretend any of them were actually there to learn, “Hold on to the wall and practice kicking.”

“Hurry back, Kale,” one of the girls shouted as he climbed out of the pool. Kale rolled his eyes and headed for the locker room.

“Jamie, are you in here?” Kale called out when he got into the locker room.

There was no answer but Kale heard the distinct sound of muffled crying and found Jamie sitting by himself with his face in his hands at the end of an empty row of lockers.

“Hey buddy, what’s the matter?” said Kale as he took a seat by his brother.

“Oh Kale, it’s so embarrassing,” Jamie sniffled.

“What happened?”

“I was talking to this girl from school and she asked me to put some sunscreen on her back,” Jamie started.

“Yeah, you’re definitely getting better,” Jamie grinned and took off for the pool.

Kale headed back to the pool feeling pretty good about himself. Helping Jamie out kind of put this whole #KaleatBroomCountyCountryClub situation into perspective. Just like he’d told Jamie, it could be worse. He exited the locker room and was headed for the pool when he was stopped by Robin and his friends.

“Hey Kale, that kid’s taking your class right?” said Robin, pointing out the small brunette boy Kale had been working with that morning.

“Yeah, why?” asked Kale.

“That’s Little Phil!” Hamster exclaimed.

“Who?” Kale replied, confused.

“Gavin’s brother, you know the guy that sent Hamster all those nasty texts,” said Lucien.

“Great, this situation just gets better and better,” Kale rolled his eyes.

“I just thought we should warn you,” said Hamster. “Little Phil saw my picture on that stupid forum and tried to get a dick pic when I ran into him at the mall, then there were all those nasty texts.”

“That bad, huh?” asked Kale.

“Dude, he wanted to put me in panties and fuck me on a bed of nails,” Hamster exclaimed.

“Jesus,” Kale’s eyes bugged out.

“Hey maybe he’s the one who commented on the forum about wanting to lick your…” Robin started.

“Ugh, Robbie, shut up!” Kale groaned.

“Just saying, keep an on your back door, big brother,” Robin giggled and patted Kale on the shoulder.

Kale rolled his eyes; it felt like he’d been doing that a lot lately. He was going to offer Robin a witty rejoinder but his train of thought was interrupted by a girl’s shriek and a desperate shout from Alec, “Kale, help!”

“What now,” Kale muttered to himself as he raced over to Alec. “What is it?”

“Swimmer in the water,” said Alec, with panic in his voice. He pointed to a girl under the water who wasn’t coming up.

“Fuck,” Kale swore and jumped in after her. The girl was resting at the bottom of the deep end of the pool. Kale scooped her up in his arms and carried her out of the water.

“Jesus, I’ve never seen anything like this happen before, I just couldn’t move,” said a panicked Alec.

“It’s alright, I was right there,” said Kale as he laid the girl down on the deck. He wasn’t sure if she was breathing. “Everyone stand back, I’m going to give her mouth to mouth.”

Kale pinched her nose closed and put his lips to hers. He exhaled his breath into the girl but then felt her hand come to rest on the back of his head as her tongue probed into his mouth.

“What the hell?” Kale coughed as he pulled back.

The girl sat up and smiled brightly at her friends, “Five bucks, cough it up losers.”

“What the hell?” Kale asked again.

“Sorry sweetie, my friends bet me five bucks I couldn’t get a kiss from you,” the girl smiled at him. Alec began to roar with laughter.

“Ok, that’s it! I’ve had it with this crap. Take a good look ladies,” said Kale as he grabbed Alec, pulled him close and kissed him smack on the lips.

Alec was shocked at first but when Kale’s tongue slipped into his mouth he melted into the kiss. He sucked on Kale’s tongue and nipped at his bottom lip when Kale pulled away.

“Well, that’s disappointing,” said one of the girls as her friends groaned collectively.

“Whoa, what a kiss,” said Alec as he caught his breath. “What are you going to tell Chase?”

“Oh, I think he’ll understand,” said Kale. “You got me into this mess, you got me out of it.”

“What did I do?” Alec protested his innocence.

“Oh come on, you’re going to tell me you didn’t put that first group of girls, the ones that took my picture, up to it, to signing up for swimming lessons?” said Kale. “I’m not stupid.”

“I just thought it was cute watching you get flustered with them,” Alec grinned.

“I should kill you, you know?” said Kale.

“But you have a class to finish teaching,” Alec grinned wickedly.

“Yeah, thanks to you,” Kale huffed and started walking back to his students.

“Hey, Kale,” said the boy he now knew as Little Phil, “I think I might need some additional lessons. Do you think I could get your phone number?”

“Don’t even think about it pervert,” Kale exclaimed as he stalked back to his class.

Later that afternoon, at the end of his shift, Kale found out he’d judged correctly. When he told Chase and Sasha how he’d kissed Alec they laughed their asses off.