Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Ahhhhhh Haaaaaaa!!!!!

This morning on my usual walk with the dog I began my usual round of prayers.

I heard myself ask for grace (again), for patience (again), for help in finding my peace (again).

Then I stopped.

I always ask for these things. I always ask to be a comfort to someone, or to be a light in someone's world. Lots of times I ask to be of service to the divine power.

Those prayers have already been answered. 99.9% of the time I am graceful, patient and peaceful. 99.9% of the time I am a comfort and a light in this world.

So, why am I still asking?

I posed this question to the dog as we walked.

Well, Sundae didn't answer. But I did hear something.

I pray for these things because I think this is what God wants me to pray for. I pray for these things because I think that these are the things that will make me more loveable in His eyes.

Ahhhhh Haaaaaa!

Suddenly, my prayers changed. Suddenly, I could see that I deserved to pray for what I truly needed in that moment. It wasn't a selfish, entitled feeling. It was more like a gentle reminder that I could have everything I needed without having to prove myself to anyone or anything in the process.

It feels to me like this is one of those moments that all I have read and all I have learned has suddenly become the living truth within my heart.

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