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BLIND DRINK

“Zdpursknj, or “Satan’s Regret,” as it is known in Chuckleslovakia, is a curiously strong, and quite often lethal, liquor with more side effects on humans than red kryptonite has on Superman.

The origin of zdpursknj (or indeed, its correct pronunciation) is a closely guarded secret. That it is distilled from some kind of vegetable matter is obvious. However, exactly what kind of matter, and what is done to it during the distillation process is still unknown. Zdpursknj processing sheds (called bugout houses) are exclusively guarded by black, yellow-eyed pugs. Whether or not the pugs (a variety not found anywhere else on Earth) are involved with the distillation process is still hotly debated.”

Grecktdklskyvch Sprldstjdsko, A People’s History of Chuckleslovakia

Friday already? Have a fun, safe weekend. Monday there’ll be some poutin’ and shoutin’. Things could get silly, so stick around.

The Chuckleslovakian language has alot of consonants. I’m guessing that zdpursknj was created as a medicinal necessity to keep their vocal chords from tearing themselves free of their throats in self-defense.

I’m imagining Mr. Skdnvltjaskadski having the voice of either Minsc from Baldur’s Gate, or one of the Jagermonsters from Girl Genius. I haven’t had the chance to listen to the audiobook version of “Agatha H and the Airship City,” so I haven’t been able to make up my mind completely.

In one of the books of the Polish Trilogy, by Henryk Sienkiewicz (who won the Nobel Prize in 1905 for Quo Vadis), a character describes another’s language as sounding like: “a handful of pebbles thrown at a glass window.”