Why you really can't always believe what you read in the news…

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House buying news now, with the report in the Mirror and the Daily Mail that the younger generation are increasingly taking loans from their grandparents to try to get deposits together as they aim to get on the property ladder:

The bank of gran and grandad helps first-time buyers: One in ten rely on their relatives to help them get onto the property ladder

Some eight per cent of first-time buyers rely on cash from their grandparents

Compares with 13 per cent of existing home owners asked family to help

On average people planning to buy first home expect it will take them five years

Nearly one in 10 aspiring first-time buyers are turning to the ‘bank of gran and grandad’ to help fund their deposit, a survey has found.

Admittedly, the Mirror’s coverage tips its hand a little, running the name of the company behind the story in the first paragraph after the headlines: Santander bank.

Miguel Sard, managing director of mortgages, Santander UK said: “Despite having to use alternative income streams over and above their salary – such as relying on the bank of gran and grandad – today’s first-time buyers are demonstrating resilience and determination to achieve their home ownership goals.”

While it’s almost certainly the case that millennials are having to borrow money from their elders – whose mortgages were more aligned to their income – it’s also the case that this story is just a way for Santander to advertise their services to first-time buyers.

Catholic abstinence news now, with the Daily Mail reporting on the things we should have given up over Lent:

How to save £1,000 this Lent: Experts reveal how quitting coffee, cigarettes and CHOCOLATE could help you put aside enough to buy a designer handbag

It’s traditionally a time for abstinence and experts say Lent will not only give your willpower a boost but your wallet too.

Money-saving specialists claim you can save hundreds of pounds this Lent by ditching your vices including coffee, chocolate and ice cream.

In fact quitting so-called ‘addictive’ products such as sweets, pizza and even smartphone purchases could help you make a total saving of almost £1,000 – enough to buy a coveted Mulberry Bayswater tote.

I’m positive Catholics across the nation are delighted to learn that the Daily Mail is in their corner, especially at a time of moderate sacrifice. Although it’s fair to say the Mail has motives beyond assuaging Catholic guilt – like filling their pages with readily-available, search-engine-optimised PR copy:

That’s according to the money saving team at PromotionalCodes.org.uk who have calculated how much money we could save we they successfully ditch our cravings for 40 days and 40 nights.

Where in the Bible does it say that when you’re giving things up for Lent you can’t also make a buck or two? Well, nowhere really, mainly because there’s nothing about Lental sacrifice in the Bible, but that’s neither here nor there, as the PR spokesperson can attest:

Darren Williams from Promotionalcodes.org.uk said: ‘Usually Lent is about sacrificing something that you love, and often people tend to give up products that are unhealthy for them.

‘However, there could also be serious benefits to your wallet as well as your health when it comes to cutting out your cravings for Lent.

‘Britain has a major binge culture, and if people are able to cut out just one of the products that they love to indulge in the savings could be enormous.

Forget demonstrating your fealty to Jesus Christ, with these voucher-led savings who can afford not to Lent? Right, Promotionalcodes?

Commissioned by Superdrug, the results also noted that Saturdays are collectively more popular than every other day.

Ironically enough, Superdrug were also the company who in 2011 claimed, based on equally sound research of theirs, that women only feel sexy once per week – on a Saturday night (except, of course, when they’re buying the requisite products from Superdrug to feel better about themselves).

So I suppose we have to believe that most women have sex when they aren’t feeling sexy, or that over the last six years the social landscape has shifted by around 12 hours like the libidinal equivalents of tectonic plates. Or, perhaps, Superdrug’s research is meaningless PR guff. Motivated PR guff, indeed:

Conveniently, Superdrug co-ordinated their research with the launch a new range of of sexual lubricants.

It’s more than a little rich of the Daily Mail to play the knowing “conveniently” line here, when they conveniently publish PR non-stories like this on a daily basis in their quest for cheap and plentiful clicks.

That’s right, this astonishing new interactive tool can actually tell you the weight of your worries! Like that’s a real thing, and like worries are measured by the gram! It’s amazing what they can do with nonsensical marketing science these days, isn’t it?

How might they calculate the weight of your worries, you may well ask? Well, you see, it’s simple: they ask you to rank a range of issues on a scale of 1 to 10:

Then they ask entirely-quantifiable questions, like:

How much time you spend worrying about money / finances each day, in minutes?

How much time you spend worrying about PERSONAL ISSUES each day, in minutes?

How much time you spend worrying about FAMILY each day, in minutes?

If you can’t spot the problem here, consider precisely how anybody is meant to quantify what “time spent worrying” means – do you add up the duration of every thought? Or do you only count time where you’re sitting down actively fretting? What if your mind wanders to money woes while you’re driving – is that counted as time worrying, or time driving? If you have two thoughts lasting 10 seconds, two minutes apart, is that two minutes of worrying or just 20 seconds?

None of these questions are answerable, because time isn’t a meaningful measure of worry, especially in self-reported studies. This is meaningless, non-data.

Still, once they have your meaningless data, they need to do *something* with it – which is why they use a specially-derived (aka ‘made up’) formula to turn your numbers into a weight:

HOW THE WEIGHT WAS CALCULATED

The researchers used the formula 5a+Y+T = X to determine how much someone’s stress may physically weigh,

a = general worry level across all areas of life

Y= total level of other worries in each area of life (family, money, etc.)

T= total time spent worrying

X= weight

And then, obviously, they turn that weight into an equivalent-sized animal:

So that’s obviously bulletproof and rigorous research, and well-worthy of this story’s inclusion in the Daily Mail Health section.

Needless to say, this is not legitimate research, and is merely an advert disguised as science, created by insurance firm LV=:

Politics, economics and social affairs are just three of the potential concern factors in the tool developed by LV=.

The British car, home and life insurance firm has concluded the average weight of worry to be 496lbs (225kg) – similar to that of a panda bear, pig or lion.

Effectively, this spurious and nonsensical stress calculator is just a way of saying, “Hey, people, aren’t you worried that something bad will happen and you won’t be able to afford to pay for it? Get some insurance from us!”.

Shopping on the high street over Christmas is so stressful it affects your heartrate in much the same way as running a marathon, according to this latest research. If you’re thinking “surely that can’t be true”, you’re almost certainly right, and you’re almost certainly missing the point – this is a press release put out by a company with an axe to grind. In this case, eBay:

The study was run by eBay, who investigated the physiological responses of shoppers, during a 60-minute shopping experience.

It isn’t hard to imagine why eBay, an online marketplace, might want to tell people that being out on the high street and buying presents in person is awfully stressful and just not worth it. After all, most of that shopping can be done from the comfort of your laptop, and a certain shopping website, right?

Stuck looking for The One? Expert reveals what YOU should be considering in a partner (and opposites definitely DON’T attract)

It’s long been claimed that opposites attract but experts have found that may not be the case after all.

After looking at a number of different physical and personality traits across more than one million of its members, the experts at Match.com have found that singles are overwhelmingly more likely to hit it off with someone similar to themselves.

Dating advice in the Daily Mail here, courtesy of a dating website who wants to advertise that they exist and want to highlight the fact that they like to promote themselves as experts in dating science – Match.com.

Reading this list of things you shouldn’t do in a hotel really gives you a few ideas, doesn’t it? It really makes you think about what you could do next time you stay in a hotel, right? It really makes you want to go book a holiday soon so you can be in a hotel before you know it, don’t you think?

According to Sunshine’s poll, 52 per cent of Brits have checked out later than they were supposed to, making this the most common sin.

Sunshine, the company behind this story, is a travel company, in case that wasn’t clear from the tone and pitch of the article.

Children’s birthday parties cost families £218: Half of parents admit blowing their original budget with £77 on a venue and £33 on food

The average child’s birthday party now costs over £200, as parents come under pressure from ‘pester power’ as well as trying to out-do other families, research suggests.

Nationwide Current Accounts, which commissioned the survey, said the findings suggest that inviting a few friends round for jelly and ice cream and a game of pass the parcel no longer seems to ‘cut it’.

Keeping kids happy around their birthday is a pricey affair, and can far exceed the budget set aside by parents, according to this article from the Daily Mail… an article that was sourced from a press release by a building society. What might their angle be?

One in 25 (4%) parents had received contributions from relatives to help with their party costs, while one in six (15%) had used a credit card to fund the occasion and one in 20 (5%) had dipped into their overdraft.

If you’re going to have to dip into your overdraft to make ends meet, you’re going to need a current account with a good and flexible overdraft, right?

Phil Smith, Nationwide Building Society’s head of current accounts, said: ‘For kids, the best parties are often more about spending time with their friends, rather than a lavish event, so parents shouldn’t feel under pressure to over-deliver.’

Parents shouldn’t feel under pressure to over-deliver, says a press release from a company telling parents they are under pressure to over-deliver.