November 30, 2006

The apostate gland is a small organ lying somewhere near the heart. Although both men and women possess the organ, it appears to create more difficulties for men than for women. These difficulties seem to arise due to irritation from external sources, which causes enlargement and pressure on the heart. The primary symptom is a restlessness and discomfort with people with whom the patient disagrees, and hypersensitivity to having this pointed out, leading the patient to charge them with “apostasy” — hence the name of this otherwise obscure and apparently non-functional gland.

Lifestyle choices may play a role in the etiology of the illness, and Anglican Bishops appear to be especially at risk. Additional symptoms include

frequent urge to fulmination

having to get out of bed more than once in the night to check on some passage in Aquinas or Cranmer

unsteady, weak, interrupted or wandering stream of argument

hearing loss

being a frequent pain in the lower back or neck

difficulty in maintaining a seat in mixed assemblies

The ASA (Apostate Specific Antigen) test is indicative, but inconclusive of the exact nature of the underlying pathology. Benign Apostatic Enlargment may be treated with medication, but more serious forms of the disease require surgery.

My Contribution to the Listening Process

"a book that honors the Word of God, the faith once delivered, and moves it into our cultural context."—The Episcopal New Yorker

"seeks to meet opponents on their own ground, assessing their arguments carefully and refuting them courteously.... The value ... lies not in its conclusions alone but chiefly in the way Haller reaches them. Whoever is charged with compiling ... resources [on same-sex relationships] will want to add this book to the list."— The Anglican Theological Review