Main menu

God Bless Internet Thuggery

Tag Archives: Heat

So, before I begin, let me say that I anticipate some hate coming my way. However, I pride myself on being objective, son. In any case, while I still believe that Michael Jordan is the best basketball player of all time, his legend has taken on an unrealistic sheen. I mean, anytime there’s a debate between him and LeBron James, people bring up James’ failures. But, they never do the same for Jordan. The fact of the matter is, Jordan’s career wasn’t as perfect as folks like to pretend. All in all, the Detroit Pistons can attest to that.

Ok, let’s get straight to the shits, man. Look, anytime someone wants to disparage James, they bring up his 3-6 NBA Finals record. Or, they’ll say something like “Jordan would never get swept in the Finals.” Frankly, they pretend like the playoffs begin and end in the Finals. Now, Jordan may have been perfect in the Finals, but it took him a long ass time to get there. In fact, at one point in time, there was a narrative that a scoring champion like him couldn’t get it done. Shit, most of that narrative was due to the fact that the Pistons beat his ass every single year. Side bar, that team actually swept him before, too. The way I see it, no one should bring up James and the Golden State Warriors but neglect Jordan and the Pistons.

Fam, before Jordan won his first title in 1991, he lost to the Pistons three years in a row. Let me say that again: Michael Jordan lost to the same Detroit Pistons team THREE YEARS IN A ROW! Hell, imagine if that shit happened in the social media era. Jordan would have to deal with a lot more than just the “Crying Face” meme. Now, none of that takes away from his greatness or everything that he was able to accomplish. But, Jordan stans act like that shit never happened, bruh. Hell, they pretend like he was just a model of perfection and forget about the years that he struggled. The truth is, those struggles are what pushed him to be better. So, getting smacked around by the Pistons elevated his game, son.

In the end, I’m not here to restart the Jordan vs. James debate. Ultimately, I still think that Jordan is the G.O.A.T. But, I’m glad that The Last Dance talked about those years. By and by, acknowledging that a legend has faults doesn’t make them any less of a legend. At the end of the day, the same goes for LeBron James. So, instead of acting like a bunch of bitches, why don’t we appreciate all of the awesome shit that we’ve seen these players do. Ok? Great. That is all. LC out.

So, I’m going to keep this post short today, son. Listen, the debate is over, man. LeBron James is the greatest of all time, fam. Like, I don’t give a fuck about how people feel about him as a basketball player. All I know is, this dude used his money, power and influence to build a damn school, bruh! Frankly, that’s greater than ANYTHING he could ever achieve on the court, brethren. With that being said, James deserves ALL of our respect.

Ok, for those who have been living under a rock, James just made a MAJOR move in Akron, Ohio. Now, through his foundation, he opened up an elementary school called the I Promise School. The building was designed to hold 240third- and fourth-grade students. Furthermore, these particular kids were “identified by Akron Public Schools as behind in critical academic areas and other factors.” Essentially, James opened a school to help the at-risk youth in his hometown. All I can say is, he’s a SUPER standup dude for making this kind of investment, son.

Now, in terms of features, the I Promise School will have A LOT to offer its students. To begin, there will be free tuition, free uniforms, free transportation within two miles, free breakfast, lunch and snacks, food pantry for families, GEDs and job placement services for parents AND guaranteed tuition to the University of Akron for every student who graduates. I mean, what the fuck, man?! This is fucking phenomenal, fam! Keeping it a buck, I REALLY want this school to work, bruh. Not because of James, but because of the children who deserve a chance to be great.

In the end, I guess not shutting up and dribbling was for the greater good. Right, Laura Ingraham? Ultimately, I don’t know how people can hate on this dude, son. By and by, basketball is just a game, man. The fact of the matter is, he’s using his position to be greater than the game, fam. At the end of the day, this move should be respected on all fronts, bruh. On the real, if anyone has anything negative to say about this, then they need to analyze why they’re so hateful. Listen to the kids, bro! That is all. LC out.

Man, what the fuck is going on out here, son? Like, is competition an antiquated concept? I mean, what’s the point of watching the NBA if EVERY superstar just decides to play together? All I know is, free agency has officially jumped the shark, fam. Keeping it a buck, DeMarcus Cousins signing with the Golden State Warriors is one of the most ridiculous deals I’ve ever seen, bruh. All in all, I may need to bow out of watching league games, folks.

Ok, for those who missed it, Cousins just one-upped LeBron James in the “How To Break Social Media” game. Apparently, after not receiving any offers from other teams, because of his fucked up Achilles, Cousins decided to call the Warriors. From there, the two sides worked out a one-year deal that would bring Cousins to The Bay for $5.3 million. So, if we’re keeping count, the Warriors now have FIVE players who have been selected to an All-NBA Team. Shit, at this point, should these other teams even show up to play next season?

Look, here’s my issue with all of this, son. On the real, it seems as if players no longer want to compete against each other. Ok, Cousins did nothing wrong, according to the rules, but shit, what happened to rivalries? What happened to players going at one another, man? Hell, everyone just wants to stack the deck now and gang up on undermanned teams. Honestly, all of this shit is corny, fam. All I can say is, Cousins went from wanting to beat the shit out of Kevin Durant to joining his team. *Sigh* It’s fucking ridiculous, bruh!

Keeping it a buck, I blame LeBron and the Boston Celtics for all of this new age fuckery, son. Listen, this era began when Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen teamed up. Now, as the story goes, that Celtics team gave James headaches, which caused him to join the Miami Heat with Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh. From there, the floodgates were opened, man. Years later, Durant joins the Warriors and now this Boogie shit. Frankly, these free agency deals are nothing more than the culmination of an issue that’s been brewing for almost a decade, fam.

In the end, fuuuuuuuuuck, bruh! *Sigh* How can I even watch basketball next season, son? Ultimately, we KNOW how it’s all going to end, man. By and by, the Warriors were going to win another title without Cousins. So, it’s a foregone conclusion that they’re going to three-peat, fam. At the end of the day, let me get a contract too, Warriors. Look, the cartilage in my right knee is trash, but my jumper is still pure, folks. That is all. LC out.

So, he really did it, huh? LeBron James really signed with the Los Angeles Lakers, huh? Shit, after all of the theories and all of the speculation, he really moved to the Western Conference, huh? All in all, my least favorite part of being a basketball aficionado is about to go into overdrive, son: dealing with bandwagon fans. All I know is, I don’t want to hear ANY of these new motherfuckers try to convince me that they’re Lakers fans now, man.

Look, I may be wrong, but I feel like James is responsible for this new era of fandom. Like, instead of being fans of teams, people have become fans of players. Because of this, whatever team their favorite player is on, that’s the team these people root for. Hell, in James’s case, I’ve watched folks be Cleveland Cavaliers fans, then Miami Heat fans and back to Cavs fans. Real talk, they don’t know ANYTHING about these teams other than the fact that James was on them. In any case, despite the reality that it’ll irritate the SHIT out of me, I’m already preparing myself for these brand new Lakers “fans.”

In the end, the next NBA season is about to be WILD, fam! Ultimately, it looks like I’ll finally get my wish of seeing new teams in the Finals, bruh. All I can say is, James’s run of consecutive Finals appearances is over, son. I mean, there’s NO WAY he’s getting past the Golden State Warriors, man. Seriously, he has NO chance in the 9 Circles of Hell, fam.

As of right now, I’m picking Kevin Durant, Steph Curry and the Warriors to face Kyrie Irving and the Boston Celtics in the Finals. By and by, we’ll see how this Lakers experiment will work for James. The way I see it, he’s waiting for Kawhi Leonard to join him next year. For now, he’ll just have to put up with the shenanigans of Lonzo Ball and Kyle Kuzma. That is all. LC out.

So, Meek Mill is actually free, son. After five months in prison, his bail request was actually granted, man. Now, as a fan of his music, I must say that it’s good to see him out. However, I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t keep it a buck, fam. All in all, at this point in time, Meek only has one obligation: stay the fuck outta prison, bruh!

Ok, look, I’m not going to go in depth about how I view his situation. On the real, I already did that in an entire post, son. In actuality, I just want to give the dude some advice, man. Now, before I continue, let me get some things out of the way. First, I wholeheartedly believe that the Justice System victimizes Black people. Second, I also believe that Meek’s two-to-four year prison sentence was outlandish. Third, I’m well aware of the credibility issues of his original arresting officer. With all of that being said, Meek needs to lay fucking loooooow, fam!

Listen, from my perspective, someone in Meek’s position needs to be WAY more careful than the average person. Real talk, it’s no secret that our court system is designed to keep individuals, namely minorities, under their boot. Now, if we know all of that, we can’t give them ANY reason to helm us up, bruh! As of right now, Meek needs an entire new team, son. Frankly, he needs to keep his attorney, Joe Tacopina, and get rid of ANYBODY who isn’t helping to maintain his freedom. Look, “keeping it real” is all good until those prison bars show up.

In the end, there’s nothing else to say, man. Ultimately, I just hope Meek learned a valuable lesson, fam. By and by, he needs to stay FAR AWAY from anything that’s going to get him trapped again. Furthermore, he needs to cut off anyone who isn’t steering him in the right direction. At the end of the day, he better not let the law get him again, bruh. That is all. LC out.

Now, look, I don’t actually believe that LeBron James is single-handedly responsible for all of the Cleveland Cavaliers‘s moves before the NBA trade deadline. However; it’s just funnier to phrase it that way, son. With that being said, “The Land” OD’ed yesterday, man. I mean, I knew they were struggling and needed help. But, I never expected them to make so many damn changes in one shot. All in all, they had a BUSY ass day yesterday, fam!

So, let’s recap all of the tomfoolery that went down, bruh. Now, long story short, the Cavs no longer look like the Cavs we’re used to. Isaiah Thomas? Gone. Dwyane Wade? Gone. Derrick Rose? Gone. Iman Shumpert? Gone. Channing Frye? Gone. Jae Crowder? Gone. Lawrence Charles? Gone. Ok, maybe not me, but we all get the picture, son. Basically, the entire roster was sent to either the Miami Heat, Los Angeles Lakers, Utah Jazz or Sacramento Kings. In their place, the Cavs got back Jordan Clarkson, Larry Nance, Jr., George Hill and Rodney Hood.

Anyway, I’m not surprised that the Cavs made moves before the deadline. However; I’m surprised that they made so many moves, man. Listen, the Cavs sucked, fam. I mean, REALLY sucked, bruh. Keeping it a buck, this season gave me a whole new appreciation for Kyrie Irving. Shit, that man went to the Boston Celtics and made them legit title contenders. On the other hand, he left the Cavs in COMPLETE disarray, son. The way I see it, the Cavs had no chance of making it back to the Finals with their current team. Frankly, it was either do or die, man.

In the end, we’ll see if all of these trades make any damn difference. Ultimately, the Celtics are the team to beat in the East, fam. In any case, I still don’t see anyone beating the Golden State Warriors anyway. By and by, all of this commotion may be for nothing, bruh. At the end of the day, I’ll be watching, son. On the real, I’ve been waiting for the NBA to get more interesting. Hell, we can’t have the same ass teams competing for the chip every year, man. That is all. LC out.

So, I won’t lie, son. I’m confused about all of this Kyrie Irving kerfuffle, man. Like, I truly don’t understand what this man is doing right now. I don’t get why he would want to leaveLeBron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers. Frankly, it better be for personal reasons, fam. If not, this has to rank HIGH on the list of Dumbest Moves In NBA History.

Now, I won’t go into a lot of depth with this story, man. At this point, if people aren’t aware of the chaos in Cleveland right now, then they probably don’t care about basketball. With that being said, I question the motives of Kyrie’s desire to leave. From a basketball standpoint, it makes NO sense to me, fam. I mean, he’s coming off of three straight Finals appearances, where his team actually secured one title in the process. Not to mention, his last shot in Game 7 of the 2016 Finals is one for the ages. All in all, he’s an established winner on this team, son.

In any case, the rampant rumor is that he no longer wants to be in LeBron’s shadow. Apparently, he wants to run his own team and “can’t” fully flourish as a sidechick. Now, there are a few things wrong with that logic, son. First, Kyrie was The Man in Cleveland during his first three seasons in the league. Guess what? The team was fucking turrible, bruh.

Real talk, the year before LeBron came back, the Cavs only won 33 games, man. The very next year, the win total jumped to 53 and the squad went to the Finals. In addition, Kyrie’s stats weren’t drastically different from the previous season, fam. Meaning, a lot of that improvement came as a result of LeBron being on the team. Look, facts are facts, son. It just is what it is, people.

To add to that point, Kyrie is also coming off of his best year, statistically speaking. So, I’m really not understanding what he gains by leaving the organization. Listen, I highly, HIGHLY doubt he’ll get to the Finals by himself. He’ll either have to get past LeBron or the Golden State Warriors. On the real, neither of those scenarios are realistic, folks. It doesn’t matter if he plays for the New York Knicks, San Antonio Spurs, Miami Heat or Minnesota Timberwolves. He won’t sniff another Finals by abandoning ship, son.

In the end, Kyrie has to ask himself one question: does he want to win or be The Man? If he wants to win, then he needs to sit his ass down in Cleveland. If he wants to be The Man, I’m pretty sure my Knicks would gladly take him. Shit, I’d wholeheartedly root for him in that situation. However; I know it goes against common sense, man. Ultimately, all of this tomfoolery is making it easier for the Warriors to repeat, son. That is all. LC out.