This series has been a long stretch on my journey to a fulfilled life. I got to teach what I needed to learn. The most valuable part of what I learned is, ‘There is a need to purposefully create boundaries to foster healthy personal and professional relationships’. I became clear about what I want and defined the point of “too far” with what others want from me. When friends would tell me their struggles, I kept thinking “Boundaries! You need boundaries! ” The more I blogged about boundaries, the more I started seeing how they work and the problems that happen when they’re violated. When we identify what is really important, we can protect it by “Drawing the Line.”

Drawing the Line: Boundaries (#1):In learning about where my own line is, I can then give more respect to where other people draw their line. When I clearly communicate my boundary, I invite others to communicate their boundary.

Boundaries at Work (#3): A lot of conflict can erupt when people are not clear about expectations and responsibilities. 1. Getting saddled with another person’s responsibilities. 2. Working too much overtime. 3. Misplaced priorities. 4. Difficult co-workers.

Boundaries with Kids (#4):Develop boundaries early in young children. Teach responsibility, delay gratification, and limit-setting to have a higher probability you surviving their adolescence. Parents’ job is to prepare children for adulthood. 1. Self-Protection. 2. Taking Responsibility for One’s Needs. “We must allow children to experience the painful consequences of their own irresponsibility and mistakes.”

Boundaries in Marriage (#5): “More marriages fail because of poor boundaries than any other reason.” Boundaries need to be defined. Limits need to be communicated. Consequences need to be clear in advance. We must take responsibility for our own feelings in order to have true intimacy. Setting limits is an act of love in the marriage. When we draw the line in marriage, we become very clear about

Boundaries with Money (#8): Option #1: Gift the money. If it is a one-time transaction, consider “giving” the money as a gift. Option #2: Deal or No Deal. If the loaning process is continuous, then more drastic measures are needed. “Help them change their life, not live in denial.”

Boundaries with Friends (#9): We need to redefine what we can offer our friendships so others can be clear about what to expect. 1. High-maintenance friends need to be put on notice. 2. Privacy in marriage needs to be protected. 3. Keep friendship opportunities open. 4. Abandoning friendships because life changes is unacceptable.

Boundary Problems (#10): 1. “My boundary problem is that I don’t have any.” 2. “I don’t need help, I can do it all myself.” 3. “When I need something, you better have it.”

Boundaries with God (#11): God respects our boundaries. God allows us to feel the consequences of our choices. Own our boundaries with God. Don’t be a Freedom-Hater.

Measuring Success with Boundaries (#12): Four ways to tell if you know how to “Draw the Line” when implementing boundaries. 1. You feel resentment. 2. You feel an attraction to boundary-lovers. 3. You feel responsible only for what is yours. 4. You feel confident in saying “no” to the little things.

The conclusion of a blog series brings feelings of achievement, relief and reflection. There were two main goals for this series.

The first goal was to know what I’m responsible for. In the process, it became clear what I am not responsible for. I stopped myself from fixing other people’s problems. I didn’t own those problems. They were “not mine.” I can hold myself accountable for only the parts that are mine that I have control over. I felt relief when I implemented boundaries.

The second goal was to give more respect to other people’s boundaries. I started inquiring upfront about boundary locations so I know how to proceed. When boundaries are communicated, it invites others to protect what is important to you.

I love learning about personal growth. I am humbled by the opportunity to share insights. Wisdom served in bite-sized pieces is challenging to keep simple. Thank you for joining me on this stretch of “My Journey to a Fulfilled Life.”