2. Contact Info

3. Dealer Selection

When I arrive in Chennai, known as India’s “Gateway to the South,” my taxi driver, Arun, informs me that monsoon season may be returning a bit early, the sheets of heavy rain blanketing our car providing some compelling evidence. Trying to peer through the windshield, with the wipers of the Tata unable to dance to the quick beat of the downpour, it’s hard for me to disagree. The locals seem rather unaffected, though-one motorcyclist wears a plastic bag over his head, another’s passenger holds an umbrella, shielding both riders from the wet. Indians, obviously, don’t suffer from a lack of improvisation.

After only a mile of taking in the scene from the back seat, I realize I’m in for a week of utter mayhem. The traffic is heavy, seemingly without rule, and of, oh, a diverse variety. Naturally, there are the usual suspects, i.e., cars, trucks, vans, SUVs, and buses, but in India an array of other vehicles, including tuk-tuks (three-wheeled, motorized rickshaws), motorcycles, scooters, and bicycles-all of which toot their horns and ringers as if collectively performing Beethoven’s Fifth-transform the streets into a mosh pit of wheels. Add in throngs of pedestrians and a potpourri of on-the-loose animals-dogs, cows, goats, and pigs, to mention a few-and what you have is a proprietary blend of traffic jam, walk-a-thon, and zoo. Making things worse, there appears to be no right of way on the road; rather, it’s first come, first go, be it on wheels or legs. I begin to wonder: What’ll it be like to drive a $300,000 Ferrari through these villages and cities, where traffic is frenzied and conditions are a striking juxtaposition of future and past, first-world and third-world? Only one way to find out.

Expedition Tradition

Just last year, Ferrari celebrated its 60th anniversary, a commemoration that included such production cars as the 365 GTB4 and 599 GTB Fiorano, such race venues as Le Mans and Monza, and such drivers as Fangio and Schumacher. Suffice it to say, Ferrari has had a memorable and triumphant six decades, a span positively overflowing in tradition.

It should come as no surprise, then, that, following its China 15,000 Red Miles tour in 2005 and Panamerican 20,000-kilometer slog in 2006, Ferrari would keep alive its tradition of expeditions. The P.R. stunt for 2008? None other than South Asia, namely the Magic India Discovery Tour, an 8200-mile journey that started in Mumbai in late February and, after 12 stages, 50 journalists, and 74 days circumnavigating nearly the entire country, will return to Mumbai in early May.

I’ve been invited along for stage five, a leg that will span the states of Tamil Nadu and Andhra Pradesh, covering 900-plus miles of southern India in seven days. The transporter? A 612 Scaglietti, Ferrari’s luxurious Gran Turismo. Freshened for 2008, the 612 has received minor but vital alterations for duty in India, including a slightly raised suspension (about 0.6 inch), a 4mm-thick aluminum underbody protector, and a fine-mesh radiator grille. Other than that, the two 612s relegated for the undertaking have come as stock as those in Beverly Hills showrooms.

Chennai to Bangalore

Our first day of action doesn’t get off to a good start-not for me, personally, but rather for the Ferrari crew. The original plan was to depart at 9 a.m., but a revised schedule dispersed the previous evening has highlighted a notable change the following sunup-an F1 race in Melbourne, Australia. It’s all about priorities at Ferrari, and, let’s face it, Formula 1 is priority No. 1. Sad to say, when the first race of the season sees the checkered flag, Ferrari drivers Felipe Massa and Kimi Raikkonen have recorded a DNF and eighth-place finish, respectively. To pour salt on the wound, Ferrari’s archrival, McLaren, finishes first and fifth. Is this a sign of things to come?

Out of Chennai, I hop on a two-lane road bustling with activity-pedestrians, scooters, bulls, Tatas, potholes the size of Guam. You name it, I have to honk at it, avoid it, and shake my head at it. Eventually, though, the action subsides, the cityscape behind me keeping it contained, and I begin to relax a bit, noting that the topography around me has transformed to lush, rocky hills strewn with emerald palm trees and beige boulders the size of Escalades. The backdrop eventually turns to small villages composed of shacks, schools, factories, missions, and hospitals, all of which look simple, worn, and tired, but perfectly functional and content. Because many of the locals have never seen a Ferrari, they gaze at the 612s, well, like they’ve never seen a Ferrari, staring at the machines as if they’re spaceships, mouths agape and eyes wide open. Ultimately, though, they just smile and giggle, recognizing that they’ve seen something special. The children, naturally, are a bit more active, running beside the cars, following along, yelling and screaming, tapping the aluminum panels as if to say hi.

Bangalore to Hyderabad

Bangalore is known as the Silicon Valley of India, what with its booming IT sector that includes the likes of Infosys and Google R&D. And with around seven million people, it’s a busy metropolis crammed with extreme, bizarre traffic. Entering intersections and roundabouts, in which stoplights mean nothing, is a practice of sticking out the 612’s nose, picking a semi-open window of opportunity, and then hoping for the best. Luckily, other vehicles and passersby are so dumbfounded and in awe of the car that I’m allowed to slide through unharmed-but only just. It’s like playing Frogger in a Ferrari. Moreover, the tuk-tuks and bikes seem to gravitate to the 612 like mosquitoes to a belly sprayed with Sprite. They’re constantly swarming around, buzzing the bumpers, and zigzagging in the periphery. It’s impossible to keep track of every corner of the car, where the action is always-always-changing. Still, somehow, there’s a calm chaos to driving in India-a million things going on at once, with everyone seemingly unaffected and totally at ease.

That evening, a gala dinner at the fancy Taj West End Hotel, where Hotmail founder Sabeer Bhatia is holding his wedding reception, provides further evidence that Bangalore is brimming with rupees. Most of the attendees are local elite, and two, who apparently are determined to show up our pair of Scagliettis, arrive in matching F430 Spiders-an interesting phenomenon seeing that there’s, let’s see, not one Ferrari dealership in the entire country. “I had to import mine from Singapore and he brought his in from London,” one says. But after two days behind the wheel, in which triple-digit speeds prove as accessible as tri-tip, I feel obliged to ask, “But where can you ever really drive an F430 here?” After all, hustling a Ferrari around India makes about as much sense as Paul McCartney passing on a pre-nup. “On Sunday mornings we take them to this empty highway where we go 280,” he boasts. That’s kph, but, at around 170 mph, still damn fast.

Hyderabad to Vizag

Cruising into Hyderabad, also known as Cyberabad for its software technology park, I’m sweating. The temp is 90, the humidity is high, and the 612’s air-conditioning is blowing nothing but hot air-great for inflating balloons but not for driving a sports car. Fighting the muggy conditions all week, the A/C’s been working overtime and it apparently wants a day off. Andrea, one of the Ferrari techs, performs an inspection and discovers that the air-con’s filter is toast. A new one is installed and cool relief ensues.

The next day, after a short stop at Ramoji Film City, the largest film studio complex in the world according to Guinness, we head east to the naval seaport of Vizag, our final destination. The four-lane divided highway meandering through the countryside is affording me an opportunity to test the 612, providing a never-ending exercise in overtaking. It’s a repetitive cycle of using 100-millisecond redline shifts to spur 540 prancing horses, only to rein them in with the carbon-ceramic brakes every time a bike, bull, or bus occupies the lane ahead. On a few occasions, I’m able to get into somewhat of a rhythm, and it feels akin to lapping at a racetrack-wide-open throttle in second gear, a rapid 2-3 upshift, quick left then right steering inputs, a stiff stomp on the aluminum brake pedal, and then all over again. One big difference, however, is that, since I’m piloting a left-hand-drive car in a right-hand-drive country, I have to rely on my co-driver, Piet, a journalist from Belgium, to let me know when the coast is clear. With this in mind, the overtaking is a quasi combo of road and rally racing. “Cow!” “Bike!” and “Truck!” are Piet’s most common warnings, while “Okay, you can go,” is the most welcomed. The worst? “Clear…Wait, family on a bike!”

Certainly, the one predictable trait of India is its unpredictability. What’s around the next bend? What’s going to jump out from those bushes? What are those 20 million motorcyclists thinking? Why is that 12-ton bus heading southbound in a northbound lane? You never know. Staying alert and on your toes is the name of the game. Relax, and it could be game over.

Luckily, my trip ends without incident. No dents or scratches, no scars or bruises. Just incredible moments, unforgettable memories, and one disagreeable dinner resulting in a tandoori toss into the toilet. Unpredictable, for sure. Considering that, Ferrari’s India Discovery tour actually makes some sense. After all, who would’ve predicted that two 612s would amass more than 8000 miles plodding around India? Magic, indeed.

Small and supersize: making a scene in bollywood

Ferrari has brought along a total of 10 support vehicles-including two Tata Safari SUVs, two Tata Winger vans, and a Fiat Bravo-but none is as imposing as the Iveco LMV nor as cute as the Fiat 500. The Iveco, a one-off of the Italian military truck, boasts 12.4 inches of ground clearance, nearly five feet of fording depth, three electro-pneumatic differentials, and 54/44-degree approach/departure angles. Naturally, it has no problem avoiding the hairiest of obstacles, but thanks to an “anti-mine” rating, it can withstand even a Hummer-humbling detonation. Despite weighing nearly 9500 pounds, the Iveco, powered by a 3.0-liter turbodiesel I-4 mated to a six-speed auto, proves surprisingly sprightly, having no problem leading the pack. Not as sprightly as the adorable 500, of course. At 140 inches long, the 100-horse Fiat zips around India as if it were back in Monte Carlo. Truth be told, many locals have simply missed the Ferraris because they’re too busy taking in our caravan’s cute and colossal couple.