Tuesday, March 14, 2017

In which the Oz Wurlitzer reptiles take on the western reptiles ...

Thanks to a kindly donor to the Newtown street library, the pond came into possession of a copy of Robert Harris's 1986 Selling Hitler, which involved the dear Chairman in the disaster known as the Hitler diaries fraud ...

It reminded the pond that the reptiles are in the entertainment business ... and has there been some entertainment of late ...

Thanks to a kindly reader, the pond was alerted to this slam dunk emanating from the West ...

Well yes, by the reptiles' usual mantra of economic management and fiscal responsibility, Colin Barnett was a disaster for the state, increasing debt tenfold.

That this was achieved during a mining boom was an even more singular level of incompetence ...

To imagine that someone should escape punishment for this magisterial stupidity is surely a sign of impending reptile senility.

So the pond decided to travel back in time to the lizard Oz editorial that sent Ben Harvey off into his rant...

It is of course sublimely fatuous, and looking through the rear vision mirror, laughably nonsensical.

The pond should complete the second gobbet before moving on ...

Roll that one around on the tongue like a XXXX peppermint:

Voters would best serve their own interests by retaining the status quo.

And maybe run up another thirty billion in debt, because what the heck, that's the status quo, and might be achieved even without a mining boom.

Put it another way: After all, we are in the entertainment business...

Naturally this sort of tosh was inviting a response ... and it got it ...

Now to be fair, it wasn't just the Oz editorial that provided a reason for flying off the handle.

In its reporting on the election, the lizards of Oz had pointedly contrasted their righteous lemming path to the cliff with the WA reptiles ...

Credible strategy?

Ben Harvey had the final word on that phase of the war with the suggestion that the lizards of Oz deserved a new organ ...

Well it was certain to produce a response. The reptiles like to lash, but they don't like the taste of the lash. Oh no, they don't like it up 'em, do they Captain Mainwaring?

One response was pathetic, though the pond had trouble experiencing the sublime pathos ...

Even by dullard Jeffrey's low standards - and they get very low - the kick to the reptile groin resulted in the Wurlitzer of the Nation ...

A Wurlitzer instead of ripping a new arsehole? Oh, it's beyond the valley of the infinitely risible, but henceforth may Wurlitzer be treated as another way of saying "arse" ...

But it was Harvey's mention of Will Glasgow that made the pond think a good reptile fight might still be found, and sure enough ...

Eek, it's a Will Glasgow, as craven a Murdochian as does the rounds, a loyal and true reptile ...

First Glasgow and Lacy - think of them as a kind of Cagney and Lacey team - offered up a cartoon ...

It was clear from the get go that any thought of playing the ball had gone right out the window.

Discussion of the issues, and the lizard Oz's silly arguments in favour of a proven loser?

Nope: After all, we are in the entertainment business...

The pond just couldn't resist the star power of Glasgow and Lacy, and so felt the need to put them at the top of their piece, so that their star power wouldn't be separated from their words ...

Yes, yes, but what about the lizard Oz supporting a dropkick loser who increased the state debt ten fold.? Where were the reptiles in the Business Review when all that was going down?

Oh right: After all, we are in the entertainment business...

And it's around this point that the vixen bitches really got out the fangs and the claw and played the man ...

Now the pond doesn't hold a candle for Kerry Stokes or his group, and doesn't really worry that much about the west ... after all, they constantly agitate for secession from the union and anyway the null arbor prevents sparrows and eastern staters from crossing ...

But the sight of a couple of reptile sycophants accusing another reptile of sycophancy was simply too much for a koala to bear and reminded the pond of the chairman's Hitlerian point ... never mind the absurdity of the position, just blather about real company men while sipping the Murdochian kool aid ...

After all, we are in the entertainment business...

Yes, never mind that Hitler's diaries were an easily spotted fraud, never mind that the Donald was a fraud, never mind all that talk of economic responsibility when really running up a huge debt deserves a vote ...

Never mind any of that, the heart of the nation is actually the entertainment organ of the nation.

That's why they fancy themselves as a gigantic Wurlitzer ...

Well the pond knows what that means ... and what a giant, rounded arse it is too, elegantly squatting on inner Sydney city chairs in a Surry Hills bunker far from the west ... but handy for a good coffee ...

And so to the rest of the WA wash-up, with Rowe elegantly summing it all up, and more elegant Rowe here ...