“Big Brother” ends, “Survivor” begins and I’m kinda “Meh” about it

The fifteenth season of foul fishbowl festival “Big Brother” ended on an odd note last night — the winner was actually, I think, the person that deserved to win, the audience didn’t get to find out what happened when all the houseguests discovered they’ve been fired, the show’s racism scapegoat and the person she went after declared their friendship, and Dr. Will was still hilarious.

Meanwhile, “Survivor: Blood and Water” made two things very clear — Sacrificing yourself for your less-capable wife might get you extra kisses, but it doesn’t make the rest of your tribe happy with either of you. Also — THIRTEEN YEARS IS LONG ENOUGH TO LEARN TO SWIM. C’mon, Gervase!

I’ll tell you what — “BB”‘s Andy gave one of the most concise, convincing jury pleas I’ve ever seen on any show, which might give a clue to what sort of teacher he is (although we’re not sure if he still is a teacher, at least at the school where he used to teach.) As Dr. Will, a great player, noted, keeping blood off your hands is a viable strategy, and Andy was working overtime making sure that everyone trusted him and therefore mistrusted everyone else. I guess because it’s “Big Brother,” we can see more of the seams of those plans, so the gameplay didn’t look so smooth. But he made his point soberly and with less “Aren’t I adorable” histrionics than he showed over the season. He still annoys me. But between Spencer From The Block and Vote For Me Because I’m GinaMarie, he was the clear winner.

Meanwhile, some of our “BB” friends showed some progress as human beings or at least as people who pay attention – Amanda admitted that she’s not looking forward to her friends and families seeing her antics, Aaryn and Candice said they’ve talked it out and are friends, and Howard gave a classy speech about how he hopes some people watch themselves and learn to change, a discussion that lead to the best line from clueless Spencer, who seemed confused as to why he was being questioned about inappropriate behavior.

“Did I say anything, Julie?”

Uh, yeah.

So I’m done watching “Big Brother” pretty much. I still want to talk to Amanda Zuckerman when she comes home – she seems to already be considering her behavior and at least becoming aware of how she may have come off.

What I’m hooked on is “Survivor: Blood and Water,” featuring returning players, some of them well-known, and one of their loved ones. I hate returning players for the most part, particularly on seasons where everyone else is new, as it gives that returnee an unfair advantage. And “Heroes and Villains” annoyed me because it was a Snidley Whiplash convention, with everyone trying to outtwirl each other’s mustaches.

But this, I like, because of the range of seasons represented, and because, unlike most seasons, the goings-on in the other camp are personal. That’s not just some random guy you just met being voted off, but your husband or uncle. And, as Marissa, niece of “O.G.” Gervase found out, the behavior of your loved one on the other tribe can backfire on you. Gervase, who absolutely sucked wind during the challenge, was the loudest “In your face!” gloater after his tribe won. This made Marissa’s team mad and she got the boot, which could backfire on Gervase if she survives Exile Island and has a chip on her shoulder at a merge.

Another thing about Gervase — when he was on the original season on “Survivor,” where no one had any clue what they’d be facing, I kind of shrugged when he didn’t know how to swim. But now, I consider his still being unable to swim as egregious…MORE, even, than singers who go on “American Idol” without knowing any music made before they were born. There’s going to be a Beatles week. And there’s going to be swimming on “Survivor”. Dude, you had 13 years to learn, and if you didn’t you shouldn’t be here. Unacceptable. And at least shut up about the win you almost thwarted. He can’t be gone fast enough for me.

My sister, who I’ve got to start a podcast with, noticed something interesting – the loved ones tribe stopped to help their struggling members over the barricade during the immunity challenge, while the returning players who’d already swum past didn’t go back to helped strugglers, like Gervase, until Probst pointed out that they couldn’t proceed unless all of them had finished that stage of the challenge.

My take is that they aren’t yet thinking like a team, and since they’ve all played before, they temporarily forgot that this wasn’t individual immunity, but team immunity, and that if you let someone suck, his suck spreads to you. Suckage is contagious. Don’t catch it.

So, what do you think? Are you pleased or disgusted about Andy’s “BB” win? And who are you liking on “Survivor?” My early favorites are Brad Culpepper, because he’s loud and could be shooting himself in the foot but is fun; Caleb, the sweet, unassuming fiance of evil Colton Cumbie, and John, Candice’s husband. What say you?