When I was four, I began to brush my teeth with Bengay(insert joke here), I thought it was mint toothpaste. Fucking idiot, I should've know how to read.

Back in my ''Magic Mike'' days , right before I went on stage I put a drop of mint breath saver on my eye ,thinking it was Visine , holy fucking burn I couldn't open my eye for like 2 hs , I didn't make any money that night .