or, "How Data4 decided to cure boredom by perpetrating a short circuit mindfuck."

Something happened to me at work a few months back. I injured my hand and had to have surgery on it. It was nothing major, just a repetitive motion injury that's been brewing for some time. It finally came to a head when I was unable to perform my job without experiencing near excruciating pain. So, I was put on Light Duty while I set arranged, had, and recovered from my surgery to open up the carpal tunnel. Light Duty in my case consists of manning the Ergonomics Center, where we distribute safety equipment, such as gloves, padding, and so on. Recently, another person joined me. She's a lesbian, and I've known her for awhile. I don't know if I mentioned this before on PT, but back when I was strip clubbing, she had mentioned getting a group of her girlfriends together and going, inviting me along. It never happened, but oh well.

So, anyway, I haven't been wearing my Pheromones lately, because... well, I didn't want to waste them on work, and I don't really have a social life at the moment. So, this morning, as I was getting ready, I noticed my bottle of Dirty, and thinking about my lesbian co-worker, I saw in the mirror that I got a look on my face that was something like... well, this:

Soooo... I applied 3 drops of undiluted Dirty to my wrists and covered with Green Irish Tweed. Sort of a cross between sophisticated gentleman and perverted bastard. It didn't take long after I got to work for something to happen. She kept hovering around me, complaining of being bored, and saying "Jooooonnn! Entertain me!" I should note at this point that I'm not attracted to her, and I'm guessing because of this, we can banter in ways that normally would have someone hauled into HR. I kept teasing her in response, saying things like "What's the matter? Feeling like you wanna... jump back into the closet?"

Basically, the look on her face at any given time was one of confusion. It was like she had something going on inside that fried her brain. It was kind of funny, but a little cruel of me. I'm debating on whether or not I should do it again. You know, for the sake of science and all. I go back to my regular job in a couple of weeks, so I was just trying to think of ways to make this last bit of light duty interesting.

I love a guy who ain't afraid to get Dirty. I'll bet ya clean up reeeeeal good, too.

Oh, she was confused, no doubt. You were sending out signals she couldn't compute. Careful...she might jump back into the closet and take you with her!

I say go for it again. You're gonna go back to your regular job, so you've got an escape hatch! And while you're at it, you Dirty boy, try bringing up her invitation to the strip club. (I probably should stop abetting you...not that you actually need help.) I just think you could use a fun night out with the girls.

I love a guy who ain't afraid to get Dirty. I'll bet ya clean up reeeeeal good, too.

Oh, she was confused, no doubt. You were sending out signals she couldn't compute. Careful...she might jump back into the closet and take you with her!

I say go for it again. You're gonna go back to your regular job, so you've got an escape hatch! And while you're at it, you Dirty boy, try bringing up her invitation to the strip club. (I probably should stop abetting you...not that you actually need help.) I just think you could use a fun night out with the girls.

Bella

Haha... I know it's wrong on some level, but it's fun seeing stuff work in such a blatant and obvious way. Alright, I'll Dirty up for tomorrow. As for the strip club, I dunno... I don't do it any more. Yeah, I threatened not to go any more before, but I haven't been in over 9 months and have no desire to go. Maybe if she's hip to the idea, we could do one I've never been before, but... I dunno...