This all JUST happened so...prepare yourselves for one helluva shocker. I went out to check the mail (which is retarded since noone's aloud driving in a level three snow emergency) and i found something.

It looked like a certified package in a big brown envelope. So i took it inside and gave it to my dad, who looked at it and laughed. He handed it back to me and pointed out that it was addressed to ME! But get this folks, it had no address on it. Just my name on the front in swurvy cursive letters. Someone must've HAND DELIVERED this letter...in a snow storm no doubt!

"Don't like me? Fine!"
"I am not a bitch!"
"I never said i hated you!"
"Now who's a piece of shit!?"
"I'm not perve! Just...a lil different from you!"
"Even it were choice, this is what i'd choose!"

"Please, don't be afraid...i'm still your brother and friend."
"I have to fight, it helps and plus it might make the bullying end."
"I love you sis, never forget me, ever."
"I'll kill you if you EVER hurt my little sister!"

My meeting couldn't have gone worse, i'm expelled from school, possibly kicked out permanantely. I'm seeing a psychologist, and i'm being spit on by my ex-friends for standing up for my homosexual brothers in arms. And you know what? I feel amazing!

Today i a going infront of a judge, my preacher, my school's superintendant, and my own parents. And they're going to ask me a question i've been trying to find the answer too since i first discovered my homosexuality.

"What's wrong with you?"

I have thought deeply on this for years...since i first looked at a boy and thought of how precious his kiss would feel connected with mine. And last night, i was driven to a brink. I reached a damn in my ever flowing river's path. And i must break this threshhold if i am to know who i am and why.

A famous painter, Vincent Van Gogh once said, that he had a problem with, dare he say it, religion. And then he would go out and paint the stars. And he leaves us to wonder, what he means by “paint the stars”. Was he painting a reflection of the stars onto a canvas for others to see and enjoy. Or was he referring to those little stars that go unnoticed. Is it not these stars…these beautiful stars, these gleaming, shining stars that mean the most? I am of course speaking of the stars within us all.

I'm new here, and i suppose i should break the ice a bit huh? Well, my name's Sam, and i'm gay. Yeah, shocker huh? Most people i tell don't believe me until they meet one of my exes who stand up and say they've dated me before. I'm a very strong willed and powerful individual. I suppose i should explain my deffinition of powerful shouldn't i? Well..."powerful" is defined as the "potential for overcoming". And i see this as a deep concept. I have written many pages on this subject in my free time.