Diary of a Mad State Senator

Recently a New Jersey high school student has managed to hack into the toaster at the house of part time State Senator and full time lawyer Cheatem N. Howe. Through the toaster the student has managed to hack into the Senator's computer looking for porn. However, instead of porn he found parts of the senator's diary.

Dear Diary:

It has been a very difficult week here in New Jersey. My mentor Senator Wayne Bryant's trial has started.
I fail to understand why.
He has simply done what we all are doing, nothing wrong with that, is it?

Is my job at the university secure?
I must pay them a visit one of these days; see the progress on the Howe Library building.Reminder: print directions.

I hope aunt Eunice's job at Parks Department won't get me in trouble. I talked the supervisor into creating a position so she'll be out of the house and stop driving Uncle Thurston Howe crazy.
We all know it's not for the money; Uncle Thurston donated a lot of money from his landscaping business to my campaign, coincidently I helped him out and got her the job - that's just how we do things around here - he's family.
He called it the "Lovey Account" - what a joker.
That wasn't illegal, was it?
It certainly wasn't wrong to help family!

The Turnpike Authority is going out of their way to accommodate the citizens and is holding meetings at strategically located places so the public could voice their concerns.
Those infantile tax-payers are complaining about that as well.
If this was a truly important issue to the people they would take the time to show up for the meetings. The Authority has even scheduled a night meeting in Camden - which, of course, is met with complaints again.
I don't understand why?
I was going to attend but I have a prior commitment to go get our dog groomed.

This whole issue reminds me that I must get my new EZ-Pass from the state - I must have one for our other car. Even though my wife uses that car most of the time, I am (or rather will start) using it for state business - occasionally.

Another bombshell to hit New Jersey was the fall of Lehman Bros.
Who knew?
There were no signs we saw in Trenton for such a calamity - we knew they were in trouble and tried to help them in the summer by buying stock to the tune of $60 million from the pension fund. We really hoped to make a killing and up the state's revenue - we might have even put some of the money back in the fund.

I hope Aunt Eunice's pension won't get affected and that the CWA union members will receive the news about the danger to their pension with understanding and continue to put their full trust in our capable hands.

Who am I kidding; they'll still vote for me no matter what.

The true victims are many of our finest and richest New Jersey citizens who will find themselves with no jobs. It is time for us to step up as responsible leaders and help the unfortunate folks at Hoboken; they are an Abbott District after all.