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Thursday, January 3

Throwback Thurs: Urkel visits Full House

Throwback Thursday is something all the kids are doing on the interwebs, but instead of Tweeting pictures of my gangly ninth-grade self, here's a video dripping with early 90s glory.

I love this video. Right off the bat, we get Steve Urkel's cousin, un-ironically wearing a pink sweater with a hashtag on it. What I wouldn't give to own this sweater (I wouldn't give more than $10, actually). There is absolutely no reason for an article of clothing to ever have that symbol, especially in the 90s. Then she complains that her annoying cousin is "in town" for a science fair. You know, because it's totally normal for a 13 year old to travel from Chicago to San Francisco for a science fair. Like Carl Otis Winslow would have ever allowed that. Please.

Of course Steve shows up moments later and jumps right into his gig as the ultra-confident nerd. He immediately bonds with undisputed 90s cool guy, Uncle Jesse, and the studio audience can't get enough. Cue the standard rising action, complication (involving ugly glasses) and extremely creepy resolution with an extremely creepy Uncle Joey. Seriously, what's the deal with Uncle Joey. I just used a period instead of a question mark for emphasis on purpose, people. Of course Urkel offered some "be yourself" and "be unique" advice along the way and everything was rainbows and Golden Gate Bridges.

But the more I think about Steve Urkel, the more I realize he would absolutely not be considered a loser/nerd/freak in real life. The kid is the most confident person in the world, he's quick witted and funny, he is good at sports, he's a genius and he is clearly wiser than his age suggests. Couple that with the fact that he immediately becomes bros with the coolest man on television since the Fonz, and I am left questioning the entire premise of Family Matters. I don't buy the idea that everyone bullied Steve and threw him into all kinds of elaborate traps involving his own suspenders. Steve Urkel was cooler than cool; ice cold.

Next up, I analyze the literary merit of the chain letters Corey Matthews and Urkel sent each other in a spectacular crossover episode of Boy Meets World.

By Aaron Brandt, who thinks it's a rare condition, this day and age,to read any good news on the newspaper page.