Mom Answers

I have a 1 year old and she seemed to enjoy hitting Couple weeks ago if you said no to her, she will look at you with a mad face then put her little hand in the air as "Im going to hit you", then I'd said: "Hitting is not ok" and then she came and actually try to hit me, I didn't know what to do, because nothing really seem to work. Frustrating. Then in one week she went hitting everybody's face that tried to do something she didn't really wanted to do, even when she wasn't even involved. Until last week we went to the mall and I took her to the play areA, and she hit a little girl's face for no reason, of course the girl cried and she saw her crying and start crying too, so I went and give attention to the little girl instead of mine, then she came and kiss and hug the girl all by herself. I think she understood that hitting hurts people's feelings so she stopped just like that but now when she is frustrated she sucks her thumb. Now I have to find a way to fix that too. Never ending

Ok so I am so anti spanking for my family, I think it is hypocritcle to hit in order to teach them not to hit. that It teaches ur kida that is how u problem solve....but, about a week ago i broke my own rule and became a hypocrit. You see my son will be four next month, and he has always been a very sweet calm child. but for the last 9 month, he looses control often & watch out! he hits, headbutts and screams. He is almost 50lbs and strong. We recently found out he has a brain tumor and that is causing his behaviors. So it is out of his cotrol to a point. but after almost a year of his standing two inches from my face screamin for an hour or tting merepeatedly. I ran out of tools. time out, taking privilages, asking, telling, everything! finally one day I figured maybe i was wrong maybe a tap on the bum would catch his attention since hed never had one. i couldnt bring myself to any more then two little taps. I felt so bad afterwards...and he still hits...what now?

I agree with MrsKNL. There isn't enough "respect for your elders" these days. I was just telling my daughter today that she should be thankful because her grandmother appologized for getting upset with her. I explained that my grandmother NEVER appologized because she "didn't have to". She was the elder. While I don't agree with that I also don't think that kids should be disrepectful. The problem is how do we teach them that respect?

I can't believe how many people are recommending spanking It's very important that we as parents be the adults. We can remain calm. We can continue to return them to the time out chair, or even remove ourselves from their presence. We can tell them calmly and firmly "We don't hit." We shouldn't teach our children to not hit by hitting. It seems very counterproductive.

For all of you who believe in hitting and call other parents pansies. You may know your own children, but you do not know ours. My son is very well behaved when he is with me. I do not hit him. I use time outs and explain things to him first. He is kind hearted, good mannered and says please and thank you. His father does spank/hit and he comes back to me from his house in a very aggressive mode and stays that way for a day or two. We have problems with him at his preschool-ONLY after he has been at his dad's house. He begs not to go to his dad's house and his father's parenting style is creating problems for us.
I have never had an issue with him that is out of the ordinary for a preschooler/toddler. So those of you whop think that giving the kid a good whack is the only way to go, I can say that from my experience it is dumb. But, hey, if it works in your family, who am I to say. Just keep your generalizations to yourself, because you are not the last say in this situation.
My son understands who is the parent and who is the child in our relationship, and no, I don't want to be his "best friend".

I will not judge any mothers or fathers on this site. I have a child that is really easy to take care of. She is two and a half and I explain everything to her. There are many parents that feel that the answer is to spank and have your child fear you, as I said before I am not judging but I feel there are ways to resolve a lot of issu0es before any kind of physical contact is involved. I have seen first hand how spanking has worked. I was spanked and I dont think I ever learned anything from it except to be fearful. With my daughter I have promised myself to never spank her. Since day one I have always explained to her and put her in her room for time out. My niece who is five months younger than my daughter, she went through a hitting biting, etc stage and the best thing we did with her is put her in time out she cried bc she did not want to be there once they come out to find the parent then you explain. What people dont understand is that these kids are smarter than we think

Geez, some of you people are sanctimonious. Parenting is difficult. Moms and Dads are posting their dilemmas and experiences here to help others if they can and out of a desire to do the best they can for their children. No one's children are perfect, no one is a perfect parent and no one approach works for every child, even those raised in the same home! Cut each other a break already, huh?

I just can't get over these parents!
"My kid won't stop hitting even though I TELL him it's unacceptable!"
"My kid must have learned to hit from someone else because in our family we *never ever* touch him each other in unkind ways!"
You all are so cute!
You put your kid in time-out for seven hours but the mom who does it for 15 minutes is going to ruin her kid?
This is such a hoot! I just love these pansy parents who just want to be their kid's best friend, all doe-eyed and sweet!

I dare my kids to hit me. That'll be the last time they do too. I can't stand this redirection bologna. If my kid hits me or if I catch my kid hitting anyone else, they'll be picking themselves up off of the floor. No time outs here. I love my kids and they love me but they know I will not tolerate being hit or them hitting other people. It's disrespectful and if they're going to do it, then they're going to know what it feels like to the other person. If they hit another child and that child hits them back and my child starts crying, then there's no reason for me to nail her, the lesson has already been taught. What goes around comes around and I think that all this counting to 3 crap or you go sit in time out junk isn't preparing our kids for the real world. What's sad is that when these kids get older and go to get a job, they're refusing to work if they don't make a said amount. BS!!!!! Get off your lazy behind and get a job like everyone else in this world. Pathetic.

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