Besaid’s fires burned bright, tongues of flame licking the stars in the clear sky. Laughter and music and the sound of a young voice singing echoed over the crackle of fire. The people were happy. They had good reason. To them, a new summoner was a new chance at life.

I watched Jecht move between the small clusters of villagers, red firelight dancing across his face, grinning and shaking hands with people he’d never met but were suddenly his friends. The guardian of their hopes and dreams, and he acted like he was just another blitzer working the crowd.

An old man offered him a drink and I half-expected him to take it despite his resolve to swear off alcohol. Embarrassment was a strong motivator, but so was sorrow. Brash and crude, Jecht hardly seemed the type; he laughed and cracked jokes, and did a fair bit of leering at things and people that shouldn’t have been leered at.

In truth, Jecht was alone. It had taken me weeks to believe what Braska did; Jecht knew nothing of Spira save blitzball. It was easy to pass it off as the ramblings of a perpetual drunk, but sober, he acted the same. No respect for Yevon, no knowledge of aeons and summoners, and certainly not an Al Bhed. Insanity seemed a viable option some days, and though I’d suggested it a time or two, I hardly believed it.

“Here, have a drink.” A well-crafted cup was shoved under my nose, full to the brim with dark gold rum. “Old man wouldn’t take no for an answer. Heh.” Jecht scratched the back of his neck and grinned.

I took it but didn’t drink, instead searching faces for my lord’s. It was growing late, and tomorrow was another early start. In typical fashion, Jecht thumped down on the ground beside me without invitation. He propped himself up on his elbows, long legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles.

“What’s the matter, thought I’d be three sheets to the wind by now?” he said, sounding smug. “Don’t look so grumpy. It’s about time we got a party.”

“We don’t have -”

“Yeah, yeah.” He waved a hand. “Don’t have time. Save it.” He flopped back and tucked his hands behind his head, eyes closed and still grinning. “Braska’s busy telling some kids about those Guado things.” He cracked one eye open to add, “I bet you’re a fun drunk. Let’s get you drunk, Auron.”

“I don’t relish the idea of travelling tomorrow suffering the after-effects of too much drink.” Still, I lifted the cup and drank, sucking a quiet breath through my teeth when the taste hit me. Islanders did like their brew strong.

“Can’t hold your liquor, huh?” He gave me a solid slap on the back. “All the more reason. Drink up.”

“Jecht.”

A friendly arm slid around my shoulder as he sat up. “C’mon. No harm in havin’ a little fun.” He leaned closer, breath heavy against the slant of my jaw. “I have some good ideas. Didn’t hear you complaining before.”

Quickly, I glanced around. No one was paying attention to the fact that Jecht was draping himself casually over me. It was usual for Guardians and Summoners to have close relationships; friends, brothers, lovers. Few would think twice of it if they did notice. But Jecht indulged in public to a degree that never failed to make my face flame, and I cursed him for it.

I cursed him quite a bit.

His roughened fingertips stroked the skin below my ear and I took another drink without thinking. It burned my throat, made my vision blur for a split-second. “Not here,” I said, voice only a touch hoarse.

“Why not?” He gave a gravelly laugh, well-aware that he’d eventually have his way. “I know how hot fucking in public makes you. Tell you what.” He took the empty cup from me, arm dropping from my shoulders to slide under my coat. The warmth of his palm on my thigh seeped through the heavy cloth. “You try to keep quiet, and I’ll try to make you scream.”

I shot him a look, and he naturally ignored the clear warning on my face. Twisting toward me, the light of the flames reflected in his eyes, he cupped strong fingers over my groin and grinned like a fiend at finding me already half-hard. Lazily, he palmed me to fullness, speaking in a low, rough voice. Jecht had a dirty mouth, and found out early on exactly how it affected me.

“Still eager for it.” He flattened his hand, stroked harder. I felt a sharp tug on the laces of my pants, and his thumb slicked over the head of my cock, smearing precome and making my breath stumble. “Oh, yeah. Too bad I can’t suck you off right here.”

I swallowed a groan and flicked nervous eyes over the villagers, hoping no one had an urge to speak with Lord Braska’s Guardians. If he thought he could get away with it, Jecht wouldn’t stop. He had a way of getting what he wanted without ever paying the full price.

Pleasure built too fast, curling tight and low in my stomach. I grabbed his wrist and ground out, “The promontory.”

“Yeah?” He pumped his hand slowly, sliding foreskin easily over the head. “What about it? You want me to suck your cock that bad, huh.”

I braced a hand on the ground and thrust shallowly, skin flushed dark. I was thankful we were far from the bonfire; the shadows would hide my rising colour. Jecht waited until I drew a breath to speak before squeezing lightly, turning the breath into a groan.

“What are we gonna do up there?” The scruff on his cheek scraped my jaw as he turned his head, fisting his hand quickly over me. There was none of his usual teasing, no slow enjoyment of bringing me to the edge and holding me there. All he wanted was to make me come, and fast. My breath came in short, quick pants, his hot and slow against my ear. “Want me to bend you over a rock and shove my dick in your tight little ass, don’t you. Fill you up. Make you scream.”

The muscles of my stomach trembled and tensed. I came suddenly, spilling warm and slick over his hand. I sucked in air, held it as my body shuddered from the quick flashes of pleasure and the effort of remaining silent. I knew I hadn’t managed to keep completely quiet when he chuckled, low and rough in his throat.

I blinked open dazed eyes. Casually, he drew his hand out of my pants and licked the curve of his hand clean, radiating smugness while I slumped over and concentrated on getting my breath back.

A moment later, I crouched in front of him, coat open so only he could see my cock wet with my own come. “We’ll see when we get there,” I told him and straightened my clothes.

His expression was feral when he grabbed my arm to keep me from rising. “There’s a pool up there, ain’t it? You’re a pretty fuck when you’re wet.” A quick jerk had me on one knee, his face close enough that I breathed his breath. “Taking it hard and always askin’ for more.”

When he spoke like that, I never knew how to respond to him. His eyes shone with flames and lust, and he knew it put me off-balance. He enjoyed it. I didn’t think to complain. Jecht had a habit of thinking with his dick, and it was literally and figuratively rubbing off on me.

“C’mon,” he said, getting easily to his feet and pulling me with him. “Sooner I get you up there, sooner we have some fun.” His arm went around my shoulders again, steering me toward the village gates.

The jungle path was lit brightly by the moon, lined with the dark shadows of thick undergrowth. Gradually, the sounds of human life vanished behind us, masked by the low hum of insects and the breeze ruffling the heavy palms. I felt the knot of tension between my shoulders loosen. There were times, few and far between, that I was able to forget the journey and live for the moment, and walking through the low-thrumming jungle at night was one of them. Jecht was responsible for making me stop long enough to watch time pass by instead of endlessly chasing after its tail.

“Hey.” His knuckles brushed my cheek, caught the stray bits of hair that had fallen out of the tail. For a moment the touch was gentle, and then his fingers slid into the hair at the nape of my neck, fisting tight and dragging me closer. The crash of waves against the far below shore was a quiet rush in my ears.

I caught a quick glimpse of his face before he tugged my head back, tracing a warm, wet path with his tongue along the line of my throat. “Forget the water. You’re a good fuck no matter where you are. Maybe I’ll shove you against a tree right here.”

My hand went to his shoulder, fingers digging in and leaving white circles on his sun darkened skin. The night air was warm, growing warmer with the line of his body pressed against mine. Muscles made firm from endless practice and travel made my lips dry. I was lean, not quite slender next to the packed bulk of his frame. I never admitted to him how I liked to trace the dark ink of his tattoo with my tongue, follow the sharp angles of his chest.

He licked the corner of my mouth as he backed me off the path. I blindly stepped where he pushed, trusting him. I didn’t realise how much I did trust him then. The solid trunk of a tree hit my back and I grunted. One of his legs shoved between mine and he grabbed my wrists, forcing them above my head. Smooth bark pressed against the back of my hands.

Memories flashed like lightning in my mind; Jecht’s eyes glittering with the light of Macalania’s trees, his face lit by the Moonflow’s pyreflies, seawater dripping from his soaked hair onto my sun-warmed skin. I remembered the first time he made me forget myself, how easy it had been in his arms.

“Yeah, you remember.” He shifted both my wrists to one hand, a hold light enough to break if I wished. “And you’re never gonna forget, either.” Roughly, he shoved my pants down my thighs, grabbed my hip and jerked me forward. “I hear you, moaning my name at night. Damn near begging me to fuck you, telling me exactly how you want it.”

Blood rushed to my face, breath short and tripping in my throat. His hand stroked the curve of my ass, both possessive and teasing at once. Dry fingers dipped lower between my legs, the heat of his cock dug into my hip, and the bastard kept talking.

I felt the tip of his finger press against the tight muscle, and abruptly all I could think about was the feeling of him inside me. I made a sound, low, guttural.

Jecht laughed, a low self-satisfied chuckle, and moved his fingers to my lips “Anybody but me know how much of a slut you are? How quick you’ll get on your knees to suck my cock?”

I groaned around his fingers, tongue sliding between them. I almost told him to shut up, to stop teasing me, but there was always the off-chance that he actually would. The one thing I didn’t want him to do was shut up. Every single word he said went straight to my cock, already hard, wet and pressed tight between us. He knew me so well in such a short time, knew what my body wanted before I did.

He drew his fingers back, traced them damply over my lips before his touched mine, breathing his words right into my mouth. “How many times you wanted my come hot on your lips.”

Strong, slippery fingers spread me open, the tip of one teasing tight muscle like his tongue teased my mouth. My hands fisted against the bark, straining in anticipation. His pushed his tongue between my lips the same time his finger sunk into my body. I jerked away from the sudden burn, the feeling of being stretched too far too fast, but he didn’t ease away. He shoved deep, curled it inside me and did it all over again, then again until I couldn’t stop the sounds echoing low in my throat.

Teeth scraped my lip and Jecht swore, rough and hard as he drove his fingers into me. “Love it when you do that,” he said, finally releasing my hands. “Like that sound you make after I fuck you, finger your ass when my come’s already dripping down those pretty thighs.”

I grabbed his arms, skin hot and muscle firm beneath my fingers. He slowed down, one hand tight on my ass, thrusting shallowly against me as he started to play. He’d done it before; there was no other word for it. He’d play with me, fingers stroking quivering muscle, dipping deep, mapping out every little secret of my body just to see what sounds I would make. I’d never had a lover as bold as Jecht; he didn’t care what he did, as long as it made me moan for him.

“You’re so damn pretty,” he said, lips tracing the line of my jaw. “Could do this all damn day.” He licked at the side of my mouth, pushed his fingers inside me again and greedily swallowed my groan.

I dug my fingers hard into his arms, body clenching tight as his fingers found that one spot that made pleasure almost too intense to endure scorch through me. “Enough,” I rasped. “Enough teasing.”

He kissed me, hard. “Think so?” He licked my lips, red and bruised from his mouth, and flipped me around, pushing me up against the tree with his dick between my legs. “I like the way you squirm, Auron,” he whispered harshly in my ear. He ran his hands over me, palms flat against bare skin, and made an appreciative sound. “I like the way you’re built to be fucked.”

The slick head of his cock bumped against my sac. His hand gripped my hip hard enough to bruise. My skin always bore his marks, bruises from his hands and mouth in places only he and my lord ever saw. He enjoyed seeing them there, and only for my sake did my lord pretend they were marks from battle.

My answer was nothing more than a moan, and he shifted, sliding his dick between the cheeks of my ass. His hand slid under my shirt, stroking my back, and the hard length of him rubbed against me. I clutched at the tree, scrubbing away the bits of hair that stuck to my face with my arm.

I felt the blunt head nudging at me. Both of his hands went to my ass, spread me open and bared me to his gaze. He liked to watch me take him, his cock plunging into me again and again. I knew because he told me as he fucked me. He told me what he liked, what he didn’t like. He told me more than I’d ever told him.

“Tell me you want it,” he said, holding himself back.

I groaned a curse at him, hands braced and pushing uselessly back. His cock slid over me, so close to what I wanted. He repeated himself, and I shook my head. I knew what he wanted me to say, but the words stuck in my throat.

He leaned close, mouth closing over my neck and raising another mark. His fingers settled beside his cock, steadying himself as he worked just the tip inside me. I couldn’t breathe for a moment, certain he’d finally thrust deep, and let out a frustrated groan when he didn’t.

“Jecht,” I began.

His finger trailed around his dick, stroking the stretched muscle. I could feel his eyes following it, and the thought brought another low sound of want to my lips. His other hand still cupped my cock, the pad of his thumb pressing against the slit.

I drew a ragged breath, cursed as he rocked his hips. He murmured something I couldn’t hear and thrust again, too shallowly to do anything but tease. My breath left me in a rush and a barely audible, “Fuck me.”

I heard him groan, felt his hands tighten and he thrust again, giving a fraction of what I wanted. “Fuck me,” I said again, past the point of caring, desperate for more.

“That’s what I like to hear.” He shoved forward and jerked me back, filling me hard and fast and stealing my breath. “Say it again.”

I did. I said it again, not waiting for him to move. I said it again when he grunted a curse and thrust into me, when he grabbed my hips in both hands and started driving himself deep. I don’t know how many times I said it, just that every time I did, he gave me more.

His breath hissed into my hair, half-words telling me how good it felt, how tight, how fucking perfect. I couldn’t breathe past the hot pleasure he forced through me, praying for him to keep talking, keep moving, never stop. Never, ever stop. My hands slipped and he caught me. His hand pressed to the centre of my back, forcing me to bend over. I started to drop to my knees but he jerked me up again.

“Hands on the tree,” he growled, hand dropping down to palm my bare thigh. “Want you right where you are.”

My nails dug in, scored the thin bark. I gave him exactly what he wanted without question, mind and body completely focused on the hard, slick flesh driving into me and the knowledge that one day, I might not feel it again. Zanarkand could take so much from me, and all I wanted to do was jealously guard it, keep it for myself and to hell with Spira. Jecht could ask me for anything, I’d give it to him. I’d give everything to him, and he didn’t even know it.

Wet fingers wrapped around my cock, stroked me quickly to orgasm, my hoarse shout echoing through the jungle night. My vision blacked at the edges and my eyes shut tight, mouth falling open as I tried to regain my breath but lost it again just as quickly. I felt him shudder against me, felt him try to force himself even deeper as he came. I felt him spill warm come into me, and he shook with the effort of pulling out, letting his release slide down my thighs before he slammed back again.

My legs finally gave out, and this time he let me slip to the soft undergrowth. My skin tingled, wet with my own release and his slippery between my legs. He dragged his hand through it, coating his fingers. I panted slowly, unable to keep from squirming when his fingers pushed his come back into me.

Jecht settled behind me, body stretched in a long line against mine. “Love it that much, don’t you,” he said with his lips pressed to my damp neck.

I couldn’t answer, didn’t want to rouse myself from basking in the warmth clinging to me and the haze settled thick over my mind. For a long moment there was silence, and I merely turned my head to look at him with still-blurry eyes. His grin faded into an odd smile, and he kissed me again, softer than before, a strange contrast to his usual brashness and crudity after sex that rough.

His hand touched my thigh, skin rough from travel but gentle. “Back on the road again tomorrow, huh?”

“Yes,” I replied, not certain what else to say given his sudden change of mood. “Back to Bevelle, and from there, the Calm Lands.”

He fell silent then, idly caressing bare skin as if he couldn’t stop. I thought we would rest there in the darkness for a time, but only a handful of minutes passed before he moved.

I stared at him dumbly as he straightened his clothes and then mine, wincing slightly as I considered the consequences. He caught my expression, chucked deep in his throat, and tugged me through the dark jungle trees, surprisingly quiet on his feet.

“Jecht, the path,” I tried, casting a wary glance at the thick foliage. “We risk fiends-”

“This is faster,” he cut me off. He gave my arm a sharp jerk, turning around at the same time, and slung his arms around my waist. “Don’t know when we’ll be back here, do we?” His hand lifted, ran lightly over my bare arm. “The beach is right down there.”

We have to go back to the village was what I should have said. We’ve been gone long enough was what I should have told him. I didn’t. I remembered the look in his dark eyes when he talked about his home, and the nights when he thought I’d drifted into sleep. I kissed him and let him lead me through the trees, let him pull me along until we ran, darting through the filtered light and forgetting about the danger of fiends in the mad rush to reach the ocean.

We spilled from the jungle onto sand that shone pure white in the moonlight, and stood panting for breath. He grinned at me, shedding his clothes carelessly and tossing them to the sand. I followed him to the edge of the water, watched him dive beneath the glassy surface. The wind brought the sound of his laughter back to me, and when he beckoned, I went. I went like I always did, and forgot myself with him.

and I’ve never felt this good
I’ll never feel this good
if I ever feel this good again

stick a sword right through me
bury me in the blue sea
and that’ll be the end
-actionslacks