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It is darn cold in Bayton in April, especially if you are travelling through the Malvern Hills parish in one of these. Your ears glow glacial and are assaulted by the heavy machine-gun exhaust rattle, the cold seeps like fog through your clothes and road-repair debris flies up to cut your cheek.

Try not to smile, though. Try not to gun the tiny engine for the sheer hell of it. Try not to imagine how much more fun you could have in a car costing ten times more, with ten times the engine power and six times the weight...

For the truth is, you can't have any more fun, even if your bonnet badge is bovine, equine, feline, or winged. As Colin Chapman once said, "just add lightweight and simplify",...