Evan Rachel Wood Knows Who Her Daddy Is

After two years of watching then-teenaged Evan Rachel Wood get it on with already-married, nearly-middle-aged, and seemingly undead shock rocker Marilyn Manson, we didn't think there would ever be another Hollywood pairing so likely to make us inadvertently throw up in our own mouths.

We were wrong.

As it so happens, Wood is now involved in a relationship that's even more nausea-inducing than the last — and not simply because the new man is even older than Manson (he's 56) or because his face has been astoundingly disfigured by botched plastic surgery procedures (it certainly has). Rather, it's because the latest of Wood's tonsil hockey competitors is none other than the man who plays her father in her latest film, the Wrestler.

Now, it could be argued that we're not being open-minded enough. After all, it's not like Mickey Rourke is her real dad. He's just her fictional dad. And according to Wood, their off-screen relationship isn't so much about spank and tickle as it is about "bonding."

Obviously, we'd like to think she's telling the truth (frankly, we can't even begin to overstate how much we wish she was), but word on the street suggests that Wood is full of it, both literally and figuratively.

According to CandyKirby.com, Wood and Rourke were spotted at the Four Seasons SAG after-party this past Sunday bonding in a very non-fatherly-non-daughterly way. Reportedly, Rourke "grabbed her for a lip-lock in the outside area of the swanky hotel" and shortly thereafter, they headed "upstairs" together.

We can only presume that by "upstairs" they mean that place where on-screen daughters and their on-screen fathers can wrestle the night away.

Um, yeah.

Trying not to throw up, trying not to throw up, trying not to throw up…