My world, in thought...

Anchored in feeling my words scratch at the cieling. My heart and soul, my arms reaching out from me screaming.Dreaming and living like the weight of this world comes crashing down on this tiny little ball that I'm curled. You see I'll give a fiant smile and see the world as it's beautiful. But on the inside I'll cry and die, in death I'll be dutiful. I'll make the most of my time and be a martyr to all. Risin up to all my challenges, maybe I'll faulter and fall. But when my days comes and my final breath has been caught, I'll open up and let you see inside my world, in thought.

So Kelly is commin back to work. Kelly the annoying bitch who always had it in for me for some reason. Anyway, you'd think that would be a bad thing but no, this mean we have an extra baker so I'll once again be a floater between all 3 stores. Sounds crap? No. Although I havent spoken to Henry yet and been told of any of this it could mean me takin up the Tech Baker position he offered me ages ago. I'm too smelly and in need of a shower to go on with this at the moment so I'll let ya's know what's goin on when I do.

So it's official, I'm not the manager at Brimbank anymore. As I've posted befor my work has dropped off and I've admited that right now, I cant really handle the pressure of the position. Yesterday I spoke with Henry and he basically told me how he's not happy with how things have been runnin at Brimbank since the retarder has been installed. Pretty much in the last few days Ken and I have been shown up by a couple of 1st years in that they have had all product out by 8am and we haven't. In my own defence, apart from this last week at Brimbank, since my holidays I've only been there 2 days a week and still tryin to get my head around the new system. Henry understands this but it's not only that that I'm not performing in and I know this. My work has dropped off since long befor my holidays a few weeks ago and right now, as hard as I try, I just cant seem to pick it up again. Henry has told both myself and Ken that either we lift our game or find new jobs. End of story. He has a business to run and has just proven he can do it just as well with a couple of 1st years as what he can do with a couple of trade bakers. Fair call in my opinion. So anyway, I spoke to Ken last night and he's keen to take the position. He's pretty much been doin it since I went on holiday it was just a question of whether or not I was gona step up and take it back and for the sake of the business, I know I cant handle it now. Too much goin on in my personal life that it's affecting my work and I dont want my problems to be draging down the place.

The upside to this is that it leaves me free to take up another position that Henry's offered me that I'm really keen on doing. It's sort of a Technical Baker job. Basically, I go between the 3 shops working one on one with the staff traingin them, signing them off and everything, filling in when the managers need time off. If all goes well then it'll mean a pay rise (partly to cover the cost of travel). Also this gives me the opertunity to see how Ken, Chris and Sot all run their stores and I can learn from them about management and eventually go back into it when I'm ready.

All that's left is to talk to Henry. Hopefully I'll get the chance to do that today. I'll let ya's know how I go.

Current Mood:discontentCurrent Music: Less Than Jake (or possibly KC7, I cant tell)

So the clock keeps on tickin and it's nearin another year. Next month I turn 25. Kinda weirds me out coz I'm alot further ahead in life then I was this time last year but I'm still miles from where I want to be. I got my own place, an awesome girl to share it with, 2 dogs that terrorise my couch, a kickarse job... but that's the problem I guess, my job I mean. So much shit goin on in my personal life that as much as I try to ignor it it's takin it's toll on my professional life and my boss is comin down hard on me. Fair call really, I know I'm fuckin up and I'm tryin my best to make that effort I was a few months ago but fuck, I duno, the intent is there but action isn't. I'm goin to bed now. Fuck you myspace.

So umm... anyone wana lend me a car for a little while? Bec's just kicked the bucket.. maybe. Head gasket blown. fuckity fuck fuck. I just booked in to get my back tattoo finished today then she rang me and told me :( bugger.