The person forced to sit in the middle of the back seat in a car. Often in cases where multiple men and one woman are riding, the woman will automatically be the "bitch" to serve as padding for irrational male homophobia.

If enunciated properly, the word bitch can be demeaning to the point of devastation. The key to success when using this form of slander lies within several factors of deliverance.

In ascending order of importance, these factors of execution include:

5. Audience
4. Voice Quality
3. Setup
2. Volume
1. Selling the ‘B’

In order to further grasp the concept of the aforementioned criteria, one must journey through each of their respective degrees of impact. (For our purposes, we will refer to the insulter as the bitch-er, and likewise, the insulted as the bitch-ee.)

Audience: An appreciating audience is a must for the aftermath of a “bitch” execution. The undignified laughter of peers has a traumatic effect on the bitch-ee.

Voice Quality: This is where the talented shine. The voice quality characteristic, unattainable by most, is a predetermined ability given at birth to an elite few. A rich, booming voice can cut through the crowd, and just as easily tear through the self-esteem of the bitch-ee.

Setup: As a precursor to the slur, the setup expresses why the bitch-ee is in fact a bitch. Essentially, it gives validity to the bold accusation of the bitch-er.

Volume: Does the Pope shit in the woods? Any healthy implementation of the word bitch needs to be done with vigor and feeling, which is best expressed through volume.

Selling the ‘B’: This is the core of calling someone a bitch. Even if the former factors are given poor regard, the bitch-er still has the opportunity to redeem themselves by effectively selling the ‘B’. It cannot be stressed enough that the enunciation of the hard letter ‘B’, along with a dynamic facial performance, is the heart and soul of the bitch delivery.

In the midst of a crowded house party, Bartholomew is chugging a Smirnoff Ice Malt Beverage in an attempt to impress a flock of women. While gagging on the fruit flavored girly drink, the combination of his outdated prescription glasses and lack of coordination result in him dribbling the brew down onto the front of his sweater-vest. After Bartholomew gives out a self-loathing sigh, the witty and attractive Blake enters the room. Blake quickly assesses the situation and simplifies his conclusion into one thorough statement.

“Fuck Bart, why do you have to be such a sweater-vest wearing, Smirnoff chuggin’ ass BITCH.”

As Bartholomew shamefully digresses into a corner of the room, the party erupts into a ravenous sea of emasculating laughter.

A person - who could be of either gender, but stereotypically is a woman - who allows their spur-of-the-moment negative emotional reactions to play far too large a role in their dealings with others.

The most recognizable characteristic of a bitch is a high volume of largely unmerited complaints about others. To qualify for bitchhood, these must be a conspicuously frequent feature of her conversation, and must strike most non-bitches as exaggerated if not completely unwarranted, at least occasionally to the point of making a big deal of things that strike most others as completely innocuous.

Note that a frank but perceptive critic of others is not thereby a bitch, even if completely lacking an internal censor. Bitches frequently think of themselves as such people, but in reality they have the frankness, but not the perceptiveness.

The bitch will often come across abrasive and unreasonable, except to authority figures who can benefit her. Most are narcissistic and/or hypocritical; favourite tactics include characterizing things as horrible moral wrongs which are unobjectionable save that they inconvenience him or her personally, and complaining that someone else has been rude to them, in terms that are vastly more rude than anything the complainee has actually done.

This is not the worst thing you can call someone, but it's about the worst thing I would call anyone I might nevertheless be willing to voluntarily spend time around.

One of our friends is homeless at the moment, so we were going to let him do volunteer work instead of paying for the convention, but this one bitch complained that it was somehow unfair that she had to pay and he didn't.

When I mentioned my money problems, she just insinuated that they were my own fault, but when her parents threatened to cut her allowance the bitch wouldn't stop whining about it. She'd still have had more money than me, too.

1. n. Female dog
2. n. (vulgar) Woman who for one reason or another deserves a good bitch-slap
3. v. To talk or act as such a woman
4. n. (coarse) Woman who sleeps around

"I need to find Dosser a good bitch (1) to breed with, but Francine seems to hate all dogs. Francine is being such a bitch (2) lately. Like, she kept bitching (3) all night about how i show more respect to Dosser than to her. She didn't show any respect for me back in January when she up and screw Charlie, know what i mean? Bitch (4)."