I propose that everyone replace the word "died" with
"wore red skintight leather pants" in all personal essays.
So lead-ins like On this day last year, Munying, my cat,my best friend, accidentally ate a dead frog. 24 hours latershe wore red skintight leather pants, would now sound silly
for the right reasons, while the recollection of howWhen grandfather wore red skintight leather pantsI smiled, knowing he was finally in heaven, would be heart
breaking but no longer in a sad way. Now it must be considered
that people who do wear red skintight leather pants
don't need any more grief. That's why I also propose
the exchange go both ways, and so we read that when Jon diedat his coming out party, everyone cried and cheered him on,
which is much happier, in a much happier way.