I have been doing therapy for many years now, 5 or 6. I don’t know how much I spent, at least 30,000$. I tried so many things, SO MANY. There is one concept, one element that keeps coming back in people’s mind towards my situation: Moving On.

I know now, from experience that moving on is nothing but a mental trick. Where do you want to move to? Where is the pain in the first place?

Generally speaking the pain is inside of you. You’ve captured it, wove a thread of thoughts around it and disallowed it to flow through. It occupies space inside of you. Then once in a while, you have a trigger, a situation, something happens and the pain is awoken again. These situations are generally exterior and no matter how much effort you put into controlling the reaction, YOU are not reacting. The disallowed part of you is. And since you disallowed it in the first place, why would it listen to you? It will not. And it will keep reacting. Until the day where you gather enough courage to face it, to ALLOW it into your being. To liberate it, to let it flow.

So back to moving on. If the pain is inside, it occupies space in you, where are you going to move to? Outside of yourself, so the pain doesn’t affect you anymore?

It sounds funny, but this is exactly what people do. They keep their conscience so busy, so occupied with external events, actions, people, situations, stresses, the future, etc that they effectively have moved on. But is the pain still inside? Yes. You have simply MOVED OUT. Sure there is less reaction to the pain inside, it isn’t even triggered anymore because your focus have moved completely outside.

Therapy, healing happens when you MOVE IN. Not out. So for the hundreds of people who’ve put pressure on me to move on, including many psychologists, I say NO WAY. I’m not moving on, I’m moving in.

Phenomenal amount of snow… of the likes I have rarely seen in my life. The quality of it when it falls was so far very dry; on the first day of skiing there was waist deep powder after a 2 minute walk from the lift. That feeling of bottomless powder, of flying almost was magical, i truly enjoyed it.Continue reading Gudauri, Georgia→

This post is about some understanding and insight that I need to unload off my consciousness into the blogosphere.

First, about RELATIONSHIPS and DISSING.
It is impossible to enjoy dissing others if you don’t spend your energy doing things you don’t feel like; or, to put another way, if you don’t force yourself to be nice to people you don’t actually like. The energy unload (and hence enjoyment) that can be harvested at dissing needs to be accumulated in you first to feel a relief or some sort of powertrip. And to accumulate it you need to either force yourself to be nice to people you dislike; or in general answer to request when those requests didn’t feel necessary.Continue reading Human Mechanics Insight (Guilt, Dissing, Compromises and Being Too Nice)→

Google+ does some neat things, one of them is it creates animated gifs, and panoramas automatically for you. So far on this trip it created the following, I like them I have to admit I shoot series of pics hoping it will do just that, and so far it hasn’t disappointed.

I had to come to Mexico to find a fossil of a Mammoth in real size and on display. It’s not perfect but it made me feel so small. Quite happy I don’t have to share a territory with these animals, they could just plow their way through your house easily it seems.

I need to trim the pictures in this gallery, I will at some point. But for now, here you go.

Just because in canada, or the US, things happen in a certain way; doesn’t mean that in latin america, things need to be the same. In fact, they are quite different. First, women are great at pumping gas here, and wearing tight outfits to do so in the hot sun. Second, nobody wants to count how much money you actually left on the ground there next to the pump. No, I’m not counting that. Third, they serve drinks while people wait in the car, no you don’t have to get out and BUY 2-3$ bottles of sugared water; it’s on us! and yeah, there you have it. A beautiful PEMEX story just for you. (wordpress fucked up the order of the pictures, my apologies).

I got to Acapulco just ripe in time for the celebration of the independance of Me’ico. there were people everywhere, fireworks, a show 2 blocks from my hotel which was located in the heart of all festive activities. I didn’t know about any of it, but it was a good way to welcome me to this bustling, touristless city.

not sure what this game is called, but you throw coins and if they land in a circle, you get your coins times the circle’s value.