Friday, December 23, 2005

Fun with Dicks and James

Rick James: “Charlie Murphy! What’d the five fingers say to the face?”

Charlie Murphy: “I dunno, what?”

Rick James: “SMACK” (as he slaps Murphy in the face)

Substitute NFL pundits for James, and the Redskins for Murphy, and you’ll be close to the type of respect the Redskins are getting.

I just turned off WFAN radio in NY after hearing how the biggest surprise last week was not how good the Skins are, but that the Cowboys weren’t ready to play last week. The football genius Carl Banks was a guest on Domingo’s (sp?) show and this is a sampling of Banks’s take:

“The Cowboys weren’t ready to play” (Not: the Skins had a great game plan and are a better team)

“I was shocked because Bill usually has his guys ready to play” (Not: Gibbs had his team prepared)

“Gibbs’s ego allowed him keep in his starters and it cost them an injury to Randy Thomas the right guard and now they’ll be short if they make the playoffs” (Not: every game now is a playoff game and good teams have to finish every game)

I was also interested in hearing that the Giants are drawing straws to see who gets to pass rush against Ray Brown. I hope Brown hears that talk. Of course, Banks proved he’s an idiot by saying the defensive ends Strahan and Osi are going to have a field day on Brown and that they’ll have to keep a tight end in now to help Brown protect Brunell.

Really, Carl? Since when does the right GUARD block the defensive end? You moron.

More Carl: "They (the Cowboys) let a nondescript tight end, you know an unkown, score three touchdowns on them."

Yeah, Chris Cooley is so nondescript the rest of the league just named him to the Pro Bowl as an alternate. Let's compare two guys:

Other comments from around the league were similar to Banks’s. Christine Carter has been trashing the Redskins all year on HBO's Inside the NFL. When Marino and Collingsworth told Christine she’d have to wear Redskins gear and a Joe Gibbs racing hat if the Skins make the playoffs, Carter said she’ll petition the league to get the seventh and eighth best AFC teams in as the NFC wildcards because they're better than the Skins.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Al Michaels on MNF: “Who would ever have guessed that the Redskins would beat the Cowboys that way?”

Well, Al, they do have the third best record in their conference—better than the Giants, Panthers, Falcons—whom you love—the Bucs, the Vikings, the Cowboys, etc. Basically, they have a better record than all of the teams that wouldn’t surprise you had THEY beaten the Cowboys 35 – 7. The only teams with a better record in the conference are the Seahawks and the Bears. But, the Redskins beat them both. Shocking. Maybe the pundits should try reading and research. Talking to each other at NFL functions does not constitute research.

And, forget about Giants fan Sally Jenkins’ take on the Redskins. How about Wilbon, who should know something about football, writing that only fans who named their pets “Riggo” thought that the Redskins would beat the Cowboys like that. Well, despite the fact that I had a pet named Riggo, I think if you’ve been paying attention, you should have guessed it was entirely possible.

So, the Redskins still get no respect, and that is probably a good thing. I think all of these Redskins play just a little bit harder when they have a chip on their shoulder. You don’t think Joe Gibbs is competitive? Or, Gregg Williams? I think these guys spend just a little more time in the film room when they get disrespected like that. And, it’s much easier putting a can of whupass on your opponent when they don’t expect you to; just ask the Cowboys.

I cannot wait until tomorrow. What are Carter, Wilbon, Banks, Mike and the Mad Dog, et al. going to say after the Redskins expose the Giants?

This picture says a thousand words. I expect a similar one of Tom Coughlin.