Jerry Hayes

Javid's moment of madness and a Rake's progress

1 Jul 2015 at 06:39

What on earth is the matter with our new BIS Secretary that a lie down in a darkened room with a damp towel and a bottle of Valium can’t remedy? Oh, I know, try not to have any contact with serial head banger Dominic Cummings, the Carpet Biter In Chief for the EU separatists. Forgive me for being dim but I was under the clearly mistaken impression that Javid was there to promote British business. Silly me.

I read a piece in yesterday’s TIMES that he has urged the CBI to halt its campaign for Britain to stay in the EU. How dare they upset the Amish wing of the party by releasing a poll that eight out ten businesses of 400 questioned want to remain in. And when that ghastly commie Sir Mike Rake, the CBI president, what does this cheese eating surrender monkey know about business? His words are nothing but lick spittle from a well known Juncker running dog. I will quote his leftie pap. ‘Business must be crystal clear that membership is in our national interest. The EU is key to our national prosperity. Letting us set the trade agenda, be part of the biggest free trade deal ever negotiated, TTIP, and be able to properly compete with global giants like China and India.’ According to Javid any hint of wanting to remain in somehow undermines our negotiating position. ‘We must speak with one voice’ says our hero. But whose? Farage, Cash and the usual EU carpet biters? Is the government so terrified of this tiny minority of obsessives that those of us who believe that reformed EU is in the national interest have to bite our tongues? Does every view on Brussels have to be subject to the blue pencil of Commissioner Cash?

Sajid, old chum, if you think by appeasing the right you will further your leadership ambitions, pause; they will eat you alive. However, you might be offered a place in Adam Afriye’s cabinet. Although spaces are limited, that’s really something to look forward to. I sincerely hope that by Sunday a ‘clarification’ will be issued. I doubt that Number 10 will be over the moon about this. It certainly seriously got on my tits.
Everyone is entitled their moment of madness. But it it would be reassuring if members of the cabinet tried to avoid them.