Mohamed Kirkusawi graduated from Queen Mary, University of London, last year with a first-class BSc in computer science and mathematics. He wants to work in software development for a large company, but feels his current CV may hold him back. Here, we find out what improvements Mohamed needs to make to ensure he becomes a sought-after programmer.

Presentation

Lois McKoy, senior manager, Professional CV Services

The CV is presented in a dense, cluttered format with not enough space for easy reading. With this layout, Times New Roman font makes it even more difficult to read ...#10102; - Arial or Helvetica would be more effective.

Throughout the document, there is excessive and inappropriate use of bullets and not enough editing ...#10103;. It is more effective to place dates at the left of the page, tab over and type the company name, position and remits.

Mohamed should edit the detail on both projects in the Education section to half their present size ...#10104;

The sections containing skills are long-winded ...#10105; and the detail needs to be edited by at least a quarter. Edited sentences could be placed below the personal details at the top of the CV.

There is no reason to state proficiency levels in IT systems ...#10106; unless this is specifically requested in the recruiting process, and the text should run along with colons and semi-colons instead of tabbing across the page.

It might be useful to add brief details on each position in the Employment section to pick up transferable skills and add interest to the CV.

Employability

Alison Saunders, IT recruitment manager (Europe), Shell International

Mohamed's first-class BSc grabs attention immediately as academic standing in a relevant degree is a key criterion used to differentiate graduates. However, the allocation of half his résumé to academics is excessive ...#10107;. I suggest removing unnecessary information such as the detailed list of subjects and proclamations of skills gained. Statements such as "Learnt time management ..." are simply that: statements ...#10108;.The over-abundance of information means that details such as impressive academic prizes are overshadowed ...#10109;.

Employers are seeking well-rounded graduates who demonstrate achievement in work, scholastic and social pursuits. Résumés dominated by academic accomplishments can raise questions about whether this was gained at the sacrifice of seizing upon all aspects university life offers. Many students fall into the trap of believing that grades are the sole thing perspective employers consider.

Mohamed's work experience throughout university is also very appealing. Whether or not work is directly related to their field of study, students should ensure they pay equal attention to this area. The fact that Mohamed worked during his degree, even holding down two jobs for a time, highlights a strong work ethic.

When combined with his first-class degree, this is tangible evidence of time-management skills. A clearer structure, using bullet points to record responsibilities and accomplishments under each job, would enhance this section further ...#10110;

Graduates should also take the time to tailor their applications to different employers. This doesn't require a new résumé for each company and can often mean only minor changes. For example, Mohamed's fluency in Arabic is hidden away in his Interests section, yet this is clearly of interest to any energy company ...#10111;

With a few simple changes to structure and content, Mohamed will ensure his name makes its way on to many a graduate recruiter's shortlist.

Was it helpful?

Mohamed says: The comments are very constructive. The Shell feedback, in particular, is fantastic - it is comprehensive, detailing all the good and all the bad things about my CV. I am going to remove the unnecessary information, and make sure the CV has more spacing and less content because, as they say, it is very dense. It is good to know that being fluent in Arabic would be of interest to energy companies. I feel much more confident. Katie Shimmon If you are an undergraduate or recent graduate in need of CV surgery, send your CV to graduate@guardian.co.uk