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Friday, April 25, 2008

Swimming With The Fishies: Franch Style

We used to swim in the pond at the farm. Note that I said ‘used to.’ It used to be novel to go swimming in our cut-off shorts on a hot afternoon. That sounds like a really bad country song, but it’s true. Many an afternoon was spent swimming in the pond. Yes, this is the same pond as the notorious frozen steer incident. We also used to go fishing in the pond. Years before, they had stocked the pond with catfish. Fed by all the yummy critters washed down from the fields, the catfish grew and thrived. Little did we know how much they thrived. We spend a lot time fishing, but not a lot of time catching anything. The fish were too well fed to go for our tried-and-true chicken-livers-rotted-in-the-sun-and-tied-up-with-pantyhose bait. They were fish with a discerning palate. We spent an entire summer fishing without catching anything. One day late that summer we decided to drop in a line, wedge our pole in the dock and go off riding four wheelers. We saw a coyote and trailed him till he disappeared in some invisible den. We decided to go back and check on our pole. As we came up over the hill we saw the pole bend over with the pull of a fish. We got back as fast as we could. Boy, did that fish put up a fight. We reeled him in and found that we had a 24” catfish on our hands. You would think, after this, we would have quit swimming in there, but we didn’t. On an interesting side note, after the fish was gutted, cleaned, wrapped in foil and thrown in the fridge, we heard some clunking noises going on. We opened the fridge to find the foil-wrapped, gutless fish flopping around knocking against the mayo. Those catfish aren’t ones to give up the ghost. With our recent luck, we renewed our efforts back at the pond. We went fishing with Jeff’s brother-in-law one day and he caught something. The fish fought hard and with one quick snap broke the ten-pound test he had on his pole. Whatever it was, it was big. It was at this juncture that we found it the better part of wisdom to cease our swimming ventures. We did, however, find that it is possible to pull a knee board around the pond with the clever use of a lasso and a four wheeler. Leave it to a Folkestad to figure that one out.

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Kids Commentary!!

T: James, if you keep practicing your bow and arrow, you can get really good at it and be an Indian when you grow up. Indians are really interesting.

K: (to Chappy) You should enter a contest for Crazy, because you'd probably win.

T: I have two friends who are twins, Wi-wee and Wee-uh. But they aren't attached. Remember we watched a show about that?

T: Uh, Mom...problem! I can't poop because I didn't eat enough food.

J: Don't bring those blankets Mom. I germinated them. (meaning he coughed all over them when he was sick)

T: (after seeing a very short man) I thought he was a kid, but he is not. He is the most medium sized dad I have ever seen.

T: Chocolate is my favorite color. (that's my boy!!!)

K: Mom, come look at my hair! It looks like Justin Beaver!

K: I don't like peaches. The fur gets on my skin and makes me itchy.

T: I almost cried (on the first day of school) but then I didn't hear a peep from my tears. They are right behind my eyes, right Mama?

T: I made a best friend at school!

Me: Great! What's his name?

T: I don't know.

J: This place is like Disney Land for flies. (under the food tent at the Grange Fair)

Me: Look for the inflatable cow.

T: That's debatable, and you need an air compressor to blow it up.

T: I got a hosta leaf for my beetle!

Me: That's actually a morning glory leaf.

K: What'd you expect, an afternoon leaf?

T: I need a boy purse. It needs to have two pockets, one for cash, one for money. That's the idea. Yep!

K: Cash and money are the same thing. The paper stuff, and the metal circles are all money.

T: (sitting on his throne...aka the toilet) Mom, I'm gonna tell you what I want for my birthday, and I hope it doesn't cost too much bucks.

J: (playing the card game 'War' with himself) Hey, so far I'm winning!

Me: You're playing against yourself, of course you're winning.

J: Well, this pile is the one that is winning.

T: (watching Yukon Men) I could catch a wolverine someday when I'm a grown up, right mama? I would just make it a whole bunch of cookies for it, and then a few hours later when it is eating the cookies I would sneak up on it and shoot it.

T: Lefty loosey, tighty righty. I got that from Chappy.

K: Now where are you, Mr. Mushroom? I have an appointment with you! To smush you!

Me: Here are two beautiful egg-in-a-holes, James.

J: Well, they are beautiful but I wouldn't put them down in the record books or anything.