Sylvester Stallone's 'Rocky III' Diet Was Straight-Up Savage, Including Up To 25 Cups Of Coffee A Day

Unless you live under a literal rock, there's a strong possibility that you've seen at least one Rocky movie and know what an absolute beast Sylvester Stallone is. Even today, at the age of 71, dude looks better than most of the Gentleman I saw walking the beaches this Summer — word to the wise, guys...Dad bod only works for Leonardo DiCaprio and maybe Ben Affleck, but even he's pushing it.

That's besides the point though, I'm not here to antagonize out of shape men on the internet, I'm here to praise Stallone for revealing his Rocky III diet because seriously, sh*t's INTENSE. Honestly, I'm not sure how he managed to survive it without a single trip to the hospital. I trust that most of you are smart enough to understand that you shouldn't try this at home, but let me go ahead and remind you for good measure: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. Take a look —

2.9% body fat?! Are you freaking kidding me? I haven't been 2.9% body fat since....well, never. Maybe at birth, but I doubt it — I was a chub-ball. Of course, even Stallone admits that was dangerous as hell, but I guess that's show business for ya! Sacrifices must be made. To be honest, I'm just really confused about the 25 cups of coffee a day. How did he manage to function without extreme heart-palpitations? Beyond that, I'd imagine he was doing number 2 virtually every 5-minutes. Coffee is basically a laxative, everyone knows that!