PLEASE READ
AND FOLLOW THESE INSTRUCTIONS BEFORE USING YOUR MYECK PAGE.

Congratulations upon your
selection of the myeck page. This is a state-of-the-art page which
incorporates the latest technology to make its operation as easy as possible.
Exceptional quality backed by a host of sophisticated features and functions
makes the myeck page a truly unique page. We are confident that you
will have many years of trouble-free enjoyment if you carefully read these
instructions and follow them.

Only use the original ACA-1401 power
supply that came with your myeck page. If you should need a replacement,
contact your dealer.

DO NOT ATTEMPT
to use the ACA-1401A power supply! This could seriously damage
your myeck page and will void your warranty.

The myeck page, like most electrical appliances, works better
if you plug it in.

If that does not solve the problem,
try banging on the side of your monitor a few times.

Avoid prolonged exposure to direct
sunlight.

Discontinue use immediately if the
sun goes nova and burns the earth to a cinder.

If the myeck page sees its shadow,
there will be six more weeks of winter.

Never use the myeck page when you are
tired. Get plenty of rest beforehand.

Remember to take a break every now
and then.

Do not annoy the person in the next
stall by throwing the spare toilet paper rolls at them.

If the person in the next stall works
at the Post Office, avoid annoying them in any other way also.

Remember, the Post Office will not
deliver mail unless you insert the envelopes into the mailbox vertically,
facing away from you with the flaps on the right.

The myeck page makes a lovely
gift for any occasion.

Now available in non-prescription strength.

The myeck page is fighting to protect
your liberty.

The myeck page is crusading
for justice.

Your myeck page was made with 100%
recycled ideas.

The myeck page is now accepted in Canada.

The myeck page is Australian for beer.

The myeck page is very proud of its
gold medal from the 1984 Summer Olympics.

Your myeck page needs lots of love
and affection to be happy.

Carry your myeck page wherever you
go, for good luck.

It is better to light a candle while
using your myeck page than to curse the darkness while using those other
pages.

Your cat is pretending it knows how
to use the myeck page. It is lying. Don't let it.

Count your horse's legs before you
start. If legs are missing, discontinue use immediately.

Avoid any strange persons you may meet
with two or more mouths or six or more eyes. They are probably aliens.

Never let any friendly-looking aliens
show you their "floating ball" trick. It is a trap! They are
trying to hypnotize you!

Reports of "lobster men from Mars"
attempting to abduct the myeck page are unsubstantiated and probably attributable
to mass hysteria.

Other
pages require daily maintenance.

The myeck page's advanced design avoids
the problems with the capstans and pinch rollers needed by other pages.

Insert the optional SO-321 Super Options
card with the label side facing up.

Don't forget to send in
your registration card immediately. Registered myeck page owners are eligible
for a special offer on myeck's new home study course, MYESLAN, the sign
language for antisocial creeps.

Never use the myeck page outdoors during
a thunderstorm. Lightning could damage it.