A Horrible Legacy of Alcoholism and Addiction in my Family

(HAMBURG NY USA)

I am 42 years old and I come from an Irish family with a long history of alcoholism and addiction. Unfortunately in the past 2 years I have lost a father to the disease and in the last 2 months alone I have lost a brother and an uncle. I feel that not enough research is done on this terrible addiction.

My brother was 30 when I was on the phone with my mother and she found my brother dead in bed due to an alcohol and methadone overdose. What a waste of life! He was so young and so sick with addiction that he drank daily not just one beverage of choice. It didn’t really matter what he consumed as alcohol as long as it was a depressant.

And not only did he consume massive amounts of alcohol - he experimented with multiple pills, unfortunately most of these pills were legal prescriptions (just not his). His demise came 5 days after his 30th birthday. He left behind a son , 2 sisters and a mother along with a large family.

My father drank himself to death as well. He drank 24/7 the last 3 years of his life and he did not even experience one sober moment in the last 3 years of his life. He missed out on enjoying time with his grandchildren and his children. But he didn’t care he was severely depressed and had no interest in life except to be numb.

The ironic thing about my dad was he was sober for a 10 year stretch of his life. He led AA meetings at local jails and my family was so proud of him at this wonderful time of his life.

Another family tragedy has struck my family just this past week. Yet another fallen family member and yes another male found dead on his kitchen floor in a pool of blood. Possible drug and alcohol overdose or maybe suicide.

I want to be a spokesperson for this deadly and not recognised enough terrible disease. I hope someone reads this letter and I know there are plenty of families out there who have experienced this terrible legacy. I know this because I have attended adult children of alcoholics meetings in the past and every so often I return for a reality check.

I fear for my children and I have 3 sons. I will do everything in my power to be sure this legacy of "death" is not passed down to them as with the many other members of my family.

Comments for A Horrible Legacy of Alcoholism and Addiction in my Family

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Brother dies of Cirrosis.by: Anonymous

I can certainly relate. My brother was someone who refused to grow up. My brother always had to live with someone, he didn't know how to be alone. I don't think he was Interested in being Independent. Sad thing is my brother has a son that he dragged through his fire.
My brother at age 46 died of Cirrhosis. My brother had a fighting chance to get a liver transplant but didn't comply with his new diet or medication. It was like he didn't care enough that his life was on the line.
I would help my brother lots and had to teach him some "tough" love, in which one time he lived on the streets. This killed me because I figured this would change him, some times hitting rock bottom helps. It didn't! He ended up on life support and we almost lost him. My brother eventually over came this trial. He got better and had a fighting chance. All he had to do was a 30 day AA meeting. A new liver would of been ready in September. I was excited that he had a chance and we would continue being close. A new life for him!
My brother passed away July 30th. 2 months away from his transplant. What made him give up? He stayed sober for 14 months. I miss him dearly and often wonder if he still would drank with his new liver transplant.. I couldn't look after him anymore. Every evenue I tried was exhausted. He attended many meetings but things just seemed to be a hit and miss. I miss him dearly and in some ways feel responsible for him and his death. It's still hard to believe he is gone.
My brother was a talented musician, loved the lord, helped others get off the streets, help others fight their own addictions, but why couldn't my brother act on his own advise? It bothers me.
The day of his death I Inherited a son, my 18 year old nephew, I see all the same traits in him as my brother. He refuses to follow rules, house hops, wants to play video games and just in general has a negative attitude. I don't blame him as my brother taught him all he knows. My nephew doesn't like to help much and when the tough gets going he packs his things and leaves. The best part is, is my nephew doesn't drink and I hope he never does. I hope he sees all that we are willing to offer him. Nice home, education and lots of love. It's tough losing a parent but life will go on. My nephew always chooses the tough road.
I will miss my brother dearly. Scripture tells us "to be absent in the body is to be in the present in the lord" I hope my brother has found the peace he was looking for. My heart is broken and will always wonder what could of been.
For those who have lost my heart is with you. You are not alone. I hope to talk about my brothers life and share the good with the bad. Life isn't easy and shouldn't be done alone. Be at peace brother.

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Is Enough Being Done?by: C-P

Yours is a tragic story. I agree with your sentiments about whether enough is being done to understand alcoholism and drug addiction. I think alcohol plays far too big a role as part of our social fabric - and when you're dealing with something potentially that dangerous - many people are going to suffer tragic consequences. Because it's so widely accepted - not enough is done to educate to its potential dangers.
I admire your decision to be a spokesperson. We need more people like you with first hand experience of its especially alcohol's dangers to educate and inform.