2774–Hiho,_hiho_its_off_to_work.html

Hi-ho, hi-ho it’s off to work …

If I had a helicopter I could hover into work,
With a swish Star Trek transporter they could beam me there, like Kirk,
Or I could be chauffeur driven (pretty girl in tiny skirt,
So delays in heavy traffic would make extra time to flirt).
I could bowl along on horseback, or get carried in a chair,
If I had an open landau I’d arrive with lots of flair,
But at least I’m quite unlikely to be violently sick,
As I would be if I got here on a giant pogo-stick.
I’d consider narrow boating, the canal’s not far away,
But it’s slower than a tortoise so I’d not get there today;
Couldn’t read if I was driving, even more so on a bike,
I don’t think I’ll pull a sicky and I know I’ll never strike
So there’s only one conclusion, that I must endure the pain
Of the sad London commuter, either walk or go by train!