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Wednesday, July 31, 2013

This is normally the time
of the week where I would go through my list of requests and choose
one to feature in what is known as the All-Request Wednesday.

But here's the problem for
this week. I actually didn't get any requests for this week at all.
It's okay though. I knew looking ahead into the future that I would
have some weeks that would be slower than others when it came to
asking for requests, so I had to come up with a back-up plan in case
I had a week where I had no requests.

And, well...I figure that
if I didn't have any requests to honour for today for other people, I
would instead do a request for myself. So today's request comes from
Matthew T. of Ontario, Canada!!!

(Yeah,
that didn't sound lame or weird, did it?)

Oh
well.

Truth
be told, I've been trying to find the right words to use in regards
to something that has been weighing on my mind for a while. I hemmed
and hawwed about this particular topic because I was kind of worried
that if I talked about this subject, I might end up alienating some
people, or hurting other people's feelings.

It's
only now that I realize that the only person whose feelings I was
hurting was me. And, I think that if I talk about what it is that is
on my mind, it will hopefully help clear a few things up, and it
might give me a better perspective on my life, and how I handle the
people who happen to pass through it. Maybe by talking about my own
experiences, it might help other people who are afraid to share how
they feel speak out.

So, I
suppose that for this week, you're going to have back-to-back diary
entries. I just hope that you all are game for it.

July
31, 2013

It
isn't very often that I do a diary entry on Wednesday. Normally I
would be doing this the day after. But when the request well dries
up, you do what you have to do. That's not to say that I haven't
given up on requests. I love hearing ideas from my readers because I
really want this blog to be all about them, and I want them to have a
voice in what they want to see in this space.

However,
I do admit that I'm a little glad that the requests were a little
slow this week because it's given me a bit of a rare opportunity.

It
gives me the opportunity to be one hundred per cent brutally honest
about something that has always bugged me throughout my lifetime, and
I haven't had the courage or the chance to address it...

...until
now.

Before
I begin though, I do wish to state a little bit of a disclaimer. For
any of you who are regular readers of this column, I want to stress
that these thoughts likely don't apply to you. After all, I have so
much love and admiration for all of you out there reading this now
because it shows me that I have the possibility to truly make what I
do an actual career goal one day. Your continued support and
interest in this blog has made me very humble, and I really
appreciate it every time you read even just one of these entries.

I
just wish that in my experiences through life, I could have that same
level of support, compassion, and the occasional bit of constructive
criticism if needed surrounding me in my real day-to-day existence as
I do here on this blog.

That's
not to say that the majority of people I deal with on a day-to-day
basis are evil, callous, spiteful, and cruel. That's just silly
talk, and it couldn't be further from the truth. I get along with
mostly everyone...well...on an level of acquaintanceship that is.

And
I suppose it goes back to my feelings on friendship. You've probably
heard me mention this before, but I probably take friendship more
seriously than the average person does. But that's only because in
my own experience, finding friends has not always come easy. I'm an
expert in finding acquaintances and casual relationships, yes. But
when it comes to finding people who I can share my deepest, darkest,
most intimate secrets with...that's been the challenge.

And
part of the reason why this has been a challenge for me is because in
past experiences, I have gotten burned by people who took advantage
of me, or used my friendship against me in some manner. Even now, I
still find myself falling into the same traps. I would get close to
someone, and they would be nice to me back long enough for me to do
something for them, and then once I “outlived my usefulness”,
they'd ditch me and move on to the next patsy. Mind you, this is
most certainly a very frustrating experience to go through, and one
that I really don't want to lather, rinse, or repeat any time soon.
But, in my 32 years of living, I've gotten better with trusting
people. I'm still a smidgen bit cautious, but it's a learning
process that we fine tune throughout our entire lives.

But
there's one type of person out there in this world that I really
absolutely have no use for, and it's hard for me to admit this
because not only have I had former friends who have been guilty of
this, but teachers and admittedly some family members have
unknowingly done this.

What
am I talking about?

I'm
talking about people who choose to see me as a cause, or a pet
project, rather than a friend. And, forgive me for my “not quite
salty enough” language here, but people like that really piss me
off.

I
guess my dislike of people who do this dates all the way back to
first grade, where I had a teacher who basically tried to change
everything about me from showing me how to hold a pencil the “right”
way to making sure that I was walking on my flat feet (despite the
fact that it physically caused me pain to do so at that time). And
the thing is that she didn't exactly do it in a way that really
helped me. She shamed me, and humiliated me in front of the whole
class, and for me, that was inexcusable. A teacher should not do
that with any child. I needed a teacher who would teach me what a
fraction was, or what the capital of Canada was, or how to draw a
picture of a porcupine. I didn't need a teacher who made me feel
worthless and less of a person because she tried to shame me into
doing everything that she wanted in an effort to make me seem
“normal”.

Lemme
get one thing straight. One, you can't put a definition of the word
“normal” on one specific person. Everyone has their own idea of
what normal is. And when I was in the first grade, my normal was
walking on my tiptoes. So, I didn't really appreciate the fact that
a TEACHER was going out of her way to change my idea of normal as if
she was competing on a game show. With the way she went about it, it
was like she was going to win a quarter of a million dollars for
making me “normal”. It was just absolutely petty and tacky on
her part.

And,
it set the tone for my relationships with people to come.

Truth
be told, there's always a little sliver of doubt that lingers in my
mind whenever I have the chance to meet and befriend new people. I'm
the first to admit that I have great difficulty finding people that I
can trust because I have had so many people come into my life who
have mistaken my friendship for neediness. To some people, it almost
appears that I'm one of those people featured in those “Feed the
Children” commercials that you might see on television. They see
me as a cause, rather than a person. They see me as someone who
needs saving when a lot of the times, I'm not even aware that I had
anything that needed to be saved.

It's
very frustrating to deal with people like that, and honestly, I'm
over it.

By
now, most of you know that I am single. And, admittedly, a lot of
the reason why I am still single is largely due to the trust issues
that I have with people. This is something that I have readily
admitted to in the past, and happily, I'm finding a way to open up my
heart to people once more. But that being said, I don't really like
the fact that I have had to deal with people who claim that the
reason why I am single is due to the fact that I have some sort of
personality disorder, or some sort of brain disorder, and sending me
links to various support groups for people who have autism (and yes,
there have been people who have done this to me). That's not cool.
Friends don't do that to people. Friends may offer constructive
criticism on how to dress to impress, or friends may set you up on a
blind date, or friends might have some suggestions on how to up your
game in the romance department. Friends should never suggest that
your lack of romance is due to a chemical imbalance, or something
similar. That's just uncalled for.

Oh,
and to the former friend who kept talking down to me as if I were
still a child and suggesting that I had some unresolved “growing
pains” holding me down....what the hell were you thinking with a
comment like that? Seriously, F-you. You telling me that is
incredibly rude and thoughtless, and I thought that I would have
expected better from you in that regard. You're supposed to build
people up, not tear them down. Oh well...lesson learned, I suppose.
The hard way, mind you, but lesson learned. You tried to change me
by shaming me, and making me feel worse about myself...and had I been
a little bit more weaker, you might have succeeded in changing me for
all the wrong reasons. Fortunately, that didn't happen.

I
guess somewhere along the way, I grew tired of people who were trying
to bring me down to their level. And, I grew sick of keeping friends
who weren't really “friends”.

Again,
I have nothing against constructive criticism. It's when people try
to change me as a way to make themselves feel better that I get
really upset and angry. And, that's why I wanted to write about this
today. I get the impression that I have some people in my life who
see me as nothing more than a cause. I feel that there are some
people in this world who want to do their best to change me and
sculpt me and mould me into someone else just because. The
unfortunate thing (and I am sure that some of you can relate to this)
is that once they succeed in their changes, they don't often stick
around very long after that. And, that can be damaging to anybody's
psyche.

I hate to use the television show "Saved By The Bell" as an example, but there's one episode that I can think of that demonstrates my point. In one episode, the gang start up a teen line where Zack tries to help a girl named Melissa. Against the teen line rules, Zack sets up a date with Melissa only to discover that she is paraplegic and needs a wheelchair to get around. Despite Melissa's insistence that she is getting through life just fine, Zack sees it differently. Things come to an end at the charity wheelchair basketball game where Zack kind of embarrasses Melissa for being the only one of the group to have to be in a wheelchair. When Melissa refuses to speak to him after that, one of Zack's friends tells him that maybe she wanted to be his friend, and not his cause. Even Melissa told Zack that even though she couldn't do some things, she could still do more than he thought, and that he shouldn't treat her as if she were broken. I think Zack soon learned his lesson, and things were cool between them again.

So,
I guess the lesson that I have to share in this blog entry is that
nobody wants to be seen as a cause. However, everyone needs a friend who will treat them as such. I hate it when people treat me as if I am broken because I haven't had the same experiences that everyone else had, or because I have something about myself that I can't change.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

It's the second last day
of July, and also the last Tuesday Timeline of the month of July, so
I thought that for this edition, I would spotlight a person who
eventually became a huge star and whose most successful role lasted
ten years. But the road in which she took to get to that point was
filled with potholes, close calls, and disappointments.
Nevertheless, her story is one that should be told, and this is the
place where we're going to do it.

For now, let's take a look
at what else happened in the world on this, the thirtieth day of
July.

762
– Baghdad, Iraq is founded by caliph Al-Mansur

1502
– Explorer Christopher Columbus lands at Guanaja in the Bay Islands
off the coast of Honduras during his second voyage

1608
– Samuel de Champlain shoots and kills two Iroquois chiefs at
Ticonderoga, setting the tone for relations between the French and
the Iroquois for the next century

1629
– Ten thousand people are killed during an earthquake in Naples,
Italy

(Whew,
I'm exhausted! July 30 must be a big day for Hollywood births!)

As it
so happens, today's blog subject also happens to be someone who is
celebrating a birthday. And it happens to be a really big birthday
at that.

She
was born fifty years ago today, on July 30, 1963.

Our
subject has done a lot during her entire career. She's been a friend
to one and all, she attended a high school reunion, she's not a
therapist but plays one on television, and she helps other famous
faces find out who they think they are! Sounds like a real
well-rounded woman, don't you think?

Of
course, that's what has happened to her over the last twenty years.
Prior to that, she struggled to be heard in an industry that could be
cold and unfeeling. Regardless of which, she persevered, and after
being turned down for gigs, or miscast for others, eventually
received her big break in 1993 – the year before she was cast in
the role that would make her one of the six highest-paid and
critically acclaimed “Friends” that ever existed in the world of
situation comedies.

This
is the story of Lisa Valerie Kudrow, who turns fifty years old today.

She
was born on July 30, 1963 in Los Angeles, California, the youngest of
three children born to a physician father and a travel agent mother.
And growing up in Tarzana, California, Lisa certainly proved that she
had brains. After graduating from Taft High School in 1981, Kudrow
studied at Vassar College, earning her BA in Biology. Her original
intent was to follow in her father's footsteps to do some research on
what caused headaches, and how they could be cured. For eight years,
Kudrow worked on her father's staff, actually earning a research
credit for Kudrow's father's study on the comparative likelihood of
left-handed individuals developing cluster headaches.

TRIVIA:
Whereas some stars in Hollywood remain coy on whether or not they
have had plastic surgery done, Lisa readily admits that when she was
sixteen years old, she underwent a rhinoplasty in an effort to reduce
the size of her nose.

Now
here's the thing with Lisa. In between doing research and studying
biology in school, she had a second love. She was always interested
in the world of acting and drama, but wasn't exactly sure how she
could break into the industry. In fact, it wasn't until her older
brother introduced her to a friend of his that she began to entertain
the possibility of working as an actress.

That
friend? Jon Lovitz.

Acting
on the suggestion of Lovitz, Lisa Kudrow tried out for and joined the
cast of the improv troupe “The Groundlings” in the 1980s. She
was also the only female member of the “Transformers Comedy
Troupe”. And one of her first roles was in an episode of “Cheers”,
where she played Emily in the 1989 episode “Two Girls for Every
Boyd”.

But
as Lisa Kudrow began her career in Hollywood, every single project
that she had signed onto just didn't work out at all. Just take a
look at some of the career prospects in which she had high hopes for,
but just didn't pan out.

In
1990, she tried out for the cast of Saturday Night Live, and was a
very strong contender for joining the cast for the 1990/1991
television season. But when it came down to the producers, they
decided that they liked Julia “It's Pat” Sweeney just a little
bit more, and Kudrow was turned down for the show.

(Although
Kudrow would return to the program six years later to guest host.)

She
starred in two pilots during 1989 and 1990. One was NBC's “Just
Temporary”, and the other was ABC's “Close Encounters”.
Unfortunately for Kudrow, neither one was picked up for a full
season.

Believe
it or not, Lisa Kudrow was initially cast for the role of Roz Doyle
in the television series “Frasier”, which debuted in September
1993. But when Lisa felt as though she wasn't exactly working out in
the role, her part was replaced by Peri Gilpin.

Also
in the 1990s, Kudrow had a three episode gig on the Bob Newhart
series “Bob”, which ran on CBS between 1992 and 1993. Ironically
enough, Lisa Kudrow also guest-starred on the infamous “Newhart”
finale, which aired in May 1990. However, that series was cancelled
before any further appearances could be made.

So,
after several failed attempts at making it big in Hollywood, Lisa
Kudrow was beginning to get very frustrated. By the time that she
had won a recurring part on the NBC sitcom “Mad About You” in
1993 as Ursula Buffay, a waitress who is so self-absorbed and
self-centered that she is not very well-liked, I imagine that Lisa
was worried that this gig would only last a few months like all the
others.

Well,
not only did this particular job help get Lisa Kudrow's name on “Maps
of the Stars” all over, but it was actually this role on “Mad
About You” that helped propel her onto another show that became an
even bigger pop culture phenomenon than “Mad About You”.

You
see, while Kudrow was filming the first season of “Mad About You”,
David Crane and Marta Kauffman were in the planning stages of their
own sitcom set to air on NBC.

That
sitcom was “Friends”.

One
of the roles on “Friends” was an eccentric type going by the name
of Phoebe. Several actresses auditioned for the role of Phoebe when
the show was doing their casting in early 1994. Kathy Griffin, Jane
Lynch, and Megan Mullally all auditioned for the role of Phoebe, but
ultimately none of them were given the part.

They
were all beat out by Lisa Kudrow.

Turns
out that the producers were impressed by Kudrow. They were fans of
“Mad About You”, and they loved her performance as Ursula Buffay.
In fact, the producers came up with an idea to tie the two shows
together by making Phoebe a Buffay. By having Phoebe as Ursula's
identical, but nicer twin sister, they could have a connection
between two NBC shows, which they hoped would create a buzz for both
shows.

It
seemed to work. “Friends” became a huge hit and millions of
viewers tuned in every Thursday night to catch up on the adventures
of Rachel, Monica, Chandler, Ross, Joey, and Phoebe. And, Phoebe was
one of those characters who stood out in a huge way. Phoebe had an
interesting background. Her father abandoned her family when Phoebe
was very young, claimed that her mother was a drug dealer, and she
lived in extreme poverty during her childhood years. She ended up
living on the streets by the time she was fifteen, and had some
rather interesting experiences while struggling to survive, including
getting stabbed by a police officer, making sombreros in a factory,
and mugging a little boy named Ross Gellar for his comic book!

Eventually,
Phoebe did get off the streets, answering a roommate ad that was
posted by Monica Gellar, and the two became good friends, which set
the stage for Phoebe befriending the other four friends.

Now,
I don't really want to make this blog entry all about Phoebe, so I'll
just post three or four highlights of Lisa Kudrow's talent on
“Friends”.

(NOTE:
The triplets that Phoebe are holding are not Phoebe's. She acted as
a surrogate for her brother.)

As
you know, “Friends” lasted a total of ten seasons on the air from
1994-2004. And, that period helped Kudrow become a huge star, and
critically acclaimed actress. Throughout her time on “Friends”
and beyond, Kudrow was nominated for a total of twelve Screen Actors
Guild awards (winning twice in 1996 and 2000), and nine Emmy Awards
(winning once in 1998).

And
it was during her time on “Friends” that Lisa Kudrow began
getting offered roles in movies, which she filmed in between seasons
of the show. She played the ditzy Michele Weinberger in the 1997
film “Romy and Michele's High School Reunion”, she received
critical acclaim for her roles in 1998's “The Opposite of Sex”
and 1999's “Analyze This”, and she voiced the character of Anya
the bear in “Dr. Doolittle 2”.

Mind
you, not every film project that Lisa Kudrow was involved in turned
to gold, and nothing she could do could give “Lucky Numbers” and
“Marci X” rave reviews. But hey, at this stage in her life, I
think Lisa was just happy to have constant work as an actress, and to
Kudrow's credit, she worked her magic in just about everything she
did.

Even
after “Friends” wrapped up, Lisa still continued to get prime
acting gigs. Her short-lived series “The Comeback” earned her
three Primetime Emmy Award nominations despite the fact that it only
aired thirteen episodes before getting canned, and her latest
project, “Web Therapy”, which has aired since 2008 has gotten
Kudrow noticed in the online community as well, earning her a couple
of Webby Awards for her portrayal of therapist Fiona Wallace.

And,
beginning in 2010, Lisa Kudrow took on what could be considered her
most rewarding project yet. She started up the television series
“Who Do You Think You Are”, which showed the journeys of several
Hollywood stars going into their own family backgrounds and
uncovering long buried secrets, reuniting with family members that
they never knew existed.

One
of the subjects of the television show was Kudrow herself, and in
this clip from the show, she learned about the ultimate fate of her
great-grandmother, who was murdered during the Holocaust.

The
show aired on NBC for three seasons, ending its run in 2012.
Luckily, the show was picked up by TLC for the 2013 season, and is
currently airing new episodes. Once again, the series was critically
acclaimed, and once again, Lisa Kudrow was recognized with award
nominations for the program. Seriously, take a look at this show.
It's quite an interesting show.

So,
as we conclude this look back on Lisa Kudrow, we have to ask
ourselves...who is Lisa Kudrow?

Well,
she's a woman who was surrounded by brilliance and who is beautiful
and intelligent. She's a woman who struggled at first with the
entertainment industry, and yet persevered to be on one of the most
successful sitcoms of all time. She's a woman who developed a film
career on top of that, and thrived in many of the movies she starred
in (and those that flopped, she still had fun making). She's even
managed to have success in the world of reality television and online
television.

That's
Lisa Kudrow for you. A woman who never gave up on her dream and
finally achieved it. I am honoured to wish Lisa Kudrow a happy 50th
birthday.

Monday, July 29, 2013

My childhood memories were
for the most part good (well, aside from the whole school thing). I
remember doing so many things and having so much fun when I was
younger. I used to love going to the library. I enjoyed spending
time at the home of my grandparents. When I was staying with my
grandparents for a while, nothing gave me greater pleasure than
walking down to the convenience store just across the railroad tracks
and buying a comic book or a handful of penny candies.

(Yes, back in 1985, some
candy still cost only a penny. And here we are 28 years later, and
pennies are now as extinct – or at the very least endangered – as
the penny candy itself.)

I still have fond memories
of things that I used to do during my summer vacations when I was
younger. Going to the carnival was one of those “must-do”
things. Swimming at the local beach was also something that I had to
do at least once or twice. Having water balloon wars was especially
something that I looked forward to when the mercury in the
thermometer topped thirty degrees Celsius. And, who knew that a
simple garden hose could provide so much relief in the hot, scorching
sunshine?

I even went to a summer
camp program held at several of the local playgrounds in the area for
six years straight, which was a lot of fun. I made a lot of friends,
I played a lot of games, and I think I ate a LOT of food.

(Seriously, every week, we
would have some sort of food-related event, whether it was a Hawaiian
luau, or a make your own ice cream sundae party, or sampling
different foods from around the world. Who needed to eat lunch?)

Yes, my childhood memories
of summer were absolutely fantastic, and I wouldn't trade them for
anything in the world. However, there is always one thing that I
didn't get a chance to do during any of the summers that I have lived
through (even as an adult) that everyone else I knew did.

I've never gone on a real,
honest vacation with my family.

I will make a confession
though. 80% of the reason why my family never went on vacations
during the summer break was finance related. I've talked about this
before, but my family did not have much disposable income to work
with. There were many times in which they had NO income to work
with. Penny pinching and cutting back was just a way of life during
my childhood. Sure, my parents made sure that we had food on the
table and clothing on our backs, and to their credit they did an
amazing job at stretching a dollar most days.

Still, as a young boy I
couldn't help but feel small pangs of jealousy eating away at me
whenever the following September rolled around and the teacher always
asked us all what we did on our summer vacations. Many of the kids
in my class would talk about all of the exciting adventures that they
had during their summer holidays. They talked about meeting
Cinderella and Mickey Mouse at Disneyland. They talked about going
surfing on Myrtle Beach. They talked about seeing a Broadway play in
New York City. I think one kid even went to London, England for a
couple of weeks one year. And hearing their stories made me feel sad
and ashamed in a way. Sad because my classmates got to experience
all of these new places and I didn't, and ashamed because the
highlight of my summer experience was going on a boat tour leaving
from Gananoque (a small town just down the road from my hometown).
Certainly taking a day trip around the 1000 Islands of the St.
Lawrence River was nothing compared to riding around in a double
decker bus around Piccadilly Circus.

And it wasn't my parents
fault. They did all they could to make sure that we had a roof over
our heads. I'm sure that if they could, they would have done
everything in their power for us to have some wonderful vacations.
Alas, it wasn't meant to be. Now back in those days, I was a little
bit angry that I didn't get to have the same experiences as my
classmates did. But as I grew older, that anger subsided. If
anything, I think that I felt bad that my parents never really had
the chance to go on a vacation themselves. I don't even think they
even had a honeymoon when they got married.

Of course, nowadays my
family often joke about what it might have been like had we had the
money and the time to plan a real family vacation and we now all have
come to the same consensus.

If we went on a family
vacation, none of us would be alive to tell the tale. We literally
would have murdered each other on the way to our destination.

I mean, think about it.
Almost every “perfect” vacation has its hiccups along the way.
And in many ways, those hiccups actually make a vacation even more
memorable. And looking back on it, I don't know if I would have
necessarily enjoyed going on a week-long vacation with my family
because I know that we more than likely would have gotten into some
intense fights, and we would have had more than a meltdown or two
occur, and in all likelihood, one of us would have wandered too far
from the rest of the family and would have gotten lost.

(And yes, I'll admit that
I would have been the one to have gotten lost.)

I almost certainly would
think that if my family had chartered an R/V for a cross-country trip
from Vancouver, British Columbia to St. John's, Newfoundland and
Labrador, we would have a rather...um...interesting experience.

Why I bet it would be
almost similar to the family who starred in today's Monday Matinee.
In fact, this was the very movie that helped me realize that maybe
missing out on going on a real family vacation in my childhood wasn't
such a bad thing after all.

I mean, just ask the
Griswold family.

The Griswold family, of
course, being the main characters of the 1983 film “National
Lampoon's Vacation”, a movie based on a short story that writer
John Hughes had published inside National Lampoon Magazine, which was
based on a fictionalized account of a family vacation to Disneyland
in 1958, when Hughes was eight years old.

(And, yes, this is the
same John Hughes who was responsible for “Sixteen Candles”, “The
Breakfast Club”, “Ferris Bueller's Day Off”, and “Home
Alone”.)

The film was directed by
Harold Ramis, and when it was released on July 29, 1983 (exactly
thirty years ago today, might I add), it made a grand total of
$61,399,552 at the box office, which for 1983 standards was a huge
success.

Chevy Chase and Beverly
D'Angelo played the roles of Clark and Ellen Griswold (both Chase and
D'Angelo would play the same roles in all but one of the subsequent
“Vacation” movies), a couple from Chicago, Illinois who want to
spend more time with their children Rusty and Audrey.

TRIVIA:
In this movie, Rusty is played by Anthony Michael Hall, and Audrey
is played by Dana Barron. In each of the sequels, the kids were
recast. In actuality, the reason why the kids were recast for the
second sequel – 1985's European Vacation – was because Hall had
already committed himself to shooting “Weird Science”, and was
unable to return to the sequel.

The
plan for the vacation was supposed to be a simple one. Take the kids
to a place called Walley World.

Um...no.
Not THAT
Walley World.

I
mean a huge, fun, and exciting amusement park in the heart of Los
Angeles (which looks almost similar to Disneyland right down to the
owner of the theme park Roy Walley (Eddie Bracken) looking almost
like a hybrid of Walt Disney and Roy Disney.

At
first the family is looking forward to the vacation and the kids are
more than excited to go on the rides and attractions once they arrive
at the park which is dubbed “America's Favorite Family Fun Park”.
But almost immediately a conflict arises in how the family plans on
getting there. Since the theme park is all the way in California,
Ellen suggests booking a flight from Chicago, but Clark puts the
ixnay on the ightflay. Why would he waste money on a set of airplane
tickets when he could rent a sportswagon for a cross-country trip on
the highways of America? It was a win-win situation as far as Clark
was concerned. He could see the sights of America while having a
once-in-a-lifetime bonding experience. What could possibly go wrong?

Well...this.

And,
this. (And, yes, that is supermodel Christie Brinkley dancing near the
Ferrari.)

We
can't have a Vacation movie without an appearance from Cousin Eddie
(Randy Quaid).

And...well...this
rather unfortunate incident which features Aunt Edna (Imogene
Coca)...a rather “lively” gal.

And
when they finally arrive at the park? Well...let's just say that it
didn't exactly end the way that the Griswold family hoped that it
would.

Now
that's all that I will reveal about the plot of National Lampoon's
Vacation. I figure that the movie clips were worth more than a
thousand words anyway, and besides, the ending is such that you
really kind of have to see it to believe it. Let's just say that
when Clark finds out that the theme park is shut down for repairs, he
goes even more postal than...well...the guy from that video game
“Postal”.

So,
since today marks the thirtieth anniversary of this film, shall I
share with you some behind the scenes trivia for this movie? There's
quite a lot of it to share!

1
- Fleetwood Mac singer Lindsey Buckingham composed the theme song
for this movie, “Holiday Road”. It didn't exactly do that great
on the charts though, only peaking at #82 in 1983. Still, it remains
a cult classic – much like the film itself.

2
– The setting for Walley World was actually Six Flags Magic
Mountain in Valencia, California.

3
– The childhood pictures of Audrey hanging on the wall of the
Griswold's living room were actual shots of Dana Barron that were
taken while she made commercials.

4
– Dana Barron would later achieve minor success after joining the
cast of Beverly Hills 90210 in 1992 as recurring character Nikki, who
had a relationship with Brandon Walsh.

5
– Although the Walley World amusement park was fictional, a real
life Walley World water park was opened up in London, Ontario, Canada
a few years after the film was shot!

6
– Did you ever notice that Anthony Michael Hall seemed to grow
three inches taller than Beverly D'Angelo at the very end of the
film? There's a reason for that. The film's original ending kind of
flopped with test audiences, so a new one was shot four months after
principal filming ended – during which time Hall experienced a
major growth spurt.

7
– Anthony Michael Hall would later join the cast of “Saturday
Night Live” in 1985 at the age of just seventeen...the same show
that his on-screen father, Chevy Chase starred in a decade earlier.

8
– Harold Ramis makes a cameo appearance as a police officer towards
the end of the film.

10
– Imogene Coca nearly turned down the part of Aunt Edna because she
felt the character was too mean. She changed her mind, and ended up
being one of the stars of the whole movie!

11
– The original ending was somewhat reused in parts of the 1989 film
“National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation”. And, no, I won't reveal
what the original ending is supposed to be, because I never spoil
endings...real or fictional.

12
– The film was voted by Premiere as one of the 50 Greatest Comedies
of All Time in 2006.

13
– The only film in the National Lampoon's Vacation series to be
rated R.

14
– Director Harold Ramis stated on the DVD commentary of the film
that the scene in which the Griswolds get lost in a St. Louis ghetto
was one of the most politically incorrect scenes he has ever filmed
in his lifetime, and that if he could go back in time, he would not
have let it air the way it did.

15
– The scenes at the amusement park were not at all fun for the cast
members. Three-quarters of them ended up getting violently ill. In
Dana Barron's case, she had to take motion sickness pills in order to
get through them.

16
– Audrey was supposed to be younger than Rusty, but in actuality,
Dana Barron was born in 1966, while Hall wasn't born until 1968.

17
– Both Chase and D'Angelo recreated their roles in a 2010 Super
Bowl commercial.

18
– This was the feature film debut of actress Jane Krakowski.
Shortly after filming this movie, she landed a job on the soap opera
“Search for Tomorrow”, but is probably best known for her role on
the FOX series “Ally McBeal”.And, that's our look back on "National Lampoon's Vacation"...a movie that almost made me feel happy that I didn't get a chance to go on a family vacation. After all, it could have ended up like the Griswold's!

Still though...although I can't go back in time and change things...I wonder what it would have been like if I could have had that chance. One thing is for sure. It's something that I want to rectify.

Sunday, July 28, 2013

The summer is already in
full swing, and by my last count, we still have plenty of summer days
left on our calendar. There's still plenty of time to kick back with
a nice cool beverage by the pool side, applying suntan lotion all
over yourself (perhaps the nice coconut scented Hawaiian Tropic
sunscreen with 60 SPF that I usually use on the hottest days of the
year), and enjoy such summer activities like swimming, volleyball on
the beach, barbecuing, and frisbee throwing...

...or, you could be like
me and not have any vacation time until September and spend the
entire summer working for a living.

But no...I'm not bitter
about that. Much. I just have to keep telling myself that September
is technically a month that is more summer than fall and that it will
still be lovely weather the week I do go on vacation, and that I'll
still manage to enjoy having some time off even though it's at the
tail end of the summer months...

Oh well...at least there's
one thing that I can have going for me. I have downloaded onto my
iPod what I believe to be some of the most quintessential songs
necessary for anybody's summer soundtrack. And, for the rest of the
summer, I plan on sharing some of these songs with all of you in this
and every Sunday Jukebox until the official end of summer 2013, which
this year will be on a Sunday (September 22).

I figure that if I do
this, then at least I'll be able to partially enjoy some of the
summer through music. And, hey, it may give all of you reading this
some ideas of songs to play at your own summer celebrations.

So, let's get right into
it with today's summer favourite.

First, I'll give you a
little bit of a personal story in regards to this song. It happens
to be a song that I heard a lot in my childhood. Back in the days of
the 1980s, my mom would always have our local radio station turned on
whether she was listening to it in the kitchen while she was baking
cookies, or in the car radio driving all over town. The radio
station at that time was an AM radio station (it switched over to FM
radio in either the late 1990s or early 2000s), and as far back as I
could remember, kids my age used to make fun of it.

Let's face it. AM radio
had its place in history, but by the 1980s, it was becoming
incredibly old-fashioned and inconvenient. The sound quality of AM
radio was poor compared to the crisp, stereo sound of FM radio. You
practically had to strain your ears to be able to listen to some
songs. It just couldn't compare to the radio station that my peers
and I preferred to listen to (which at the time was Ogdensburg's PAC
93).

And this brings me to my
next point. The reason that my classmates and I tuned into PAC 93
during our formative years was because it was the one radio station
that played music from the Top 40 charts. I don't even think that
the radio station played anything that was recorded before 1979. It
had the biggest hits, it had the coolest disc jockeys, it even had
Casey Kasem on weekends!

Our local AM radio station
seemed to only have twenty-five albums at its disposal. And more
often than not, they played music that predated even myself. Lots of
1970s soft rock, 1980s adult contemporary and even
some...shudder...disco. It was fine for people like my parents and
elder siblings who grew up listening to that type of music, but as a
nine year old kid, I was more content listening to MC Hammer, Vanilla
Ice, R.E.M., Paula Abdul, Madonna, and Duran Duran.

(Quite the eclectic mix,
huh?)

However, once in a while
the local radio station would pull out a few gems from their limited
record collection. Songs that I would actually like listening to.
Granted, the sound quality was still terrible, but again, it was AM
radio.

This particular song
happens to be forty-one years old this month, and it was recorded by
a band that has gone through some major changes in members and style
over its forty-six year history.

Can you believe it? The
band's been together forty-six years! The only band I know that has
lasted longer is “The Rolling Stones”, and half the time, I find
myself finding it hard to believe that Mick Jagger turned seventy
years old two days ago!

Anyway, this particular
song was recorded on America's 195th birthday – July 4,
1971. This band was set to record their latest album in New York
City right around that time, and to pass the time in New York, one of
the band members took a tour around Central Park, which at the time
was filled with people celebrating America's birthday. And according
to him, the park had it all. From buskers to steel drum players to
singers to dancers, it inspired this man to jot down a few lyrics
based on what he had seen. When he returned to the hotel where the
rest of the band were staying, he talked the other members into
putting the lyrics to music.

That song became the
band's highest charting single at that time, and helped the band's
album reach the top spot on the Billboard 200 album list.

So, given that Robert Lamm
came up with the inspiration behind the song that peaked at #3 on the
charts in the summer of 1972, it was only appropriate that Lamm be
the lead vocalist for the following single.

ARTIST:
Chicago

SONG:
Saturday In The Park

ALBUM:
Chicago V

DATE
RELEASED: July 10, 1972

PEAK
POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS:
#3

So,
at the time that this single was released, the album “Chicago V”
was actually the band's fourth studio album. Confused? Don't be.
The live album that the band released in 1971 “Chicago at Carnegie
Hall” could also be considered “Chicago IV”. You see, that was
the thing with Chicago. Almost all of their albums had the same
name...Chicago. The only way to tell which album was which was by
the Roman numeral that followed afterward. In total, Chicago has
released a total of thirty-four albums...

...or
I guess that should be XXXIV albums.

Now,
over those thirty-four albums, the line-up of Chicago changed more
often than most people changed their underpants, so it could be very
hard to determine which band member played on which album.
Fortunately, I have the list of all seven band members who were a
part of the Chicago V album, and by association, “Saturday In The
Park”.

You
already know that Robert Lamm sang the vocals and played keyboards on
the single. Now meet the other members of the band during 1972.
They were...

Terry
Kath – guitar, vocals

Peter
Cetera – bass, vocals

Lee
Loughnane – trumpet, flugelhorn, percussion, vocals

James
Pankow – trombone, percussion

Walter
Parazaider – woodwinds, percussion

Danny
Seraphine – drums, congas, antique bells

You
know, that's quite an assortment of musical instruments and talent.
And, speaking of talent, there's a couple of pieces of trivia that I
want to share in regards to this song.

First,
Peter Cetera's voice can be heard in the background of “Saturday In
The Park”. And secondly, the real all-star of Chicago V was Robert
Lamm. Not only did he provide lead vocals and write “Saturday In
The Park”, but he wrote eight of the ten tracks listed on the
Chicago V album!

To
Chicago's credit, the whole Chicago V album was absolutely amazing.
I think it's probably one of their most successful albums, and it
happens to be one that has some of the band's best works. And, it
was recorded at a time in which the band was gelling well together
both professionally and personally. Who knew that just five and a
half years after this single was released that Terry Kath would
accidentally kill himself with a self-inflicted gunshot wound just
days before he turned thirty-two?

“Saturday
In The Park” was, I think, one of the songs that helped showcase
the band at its very best. And, how could you not be in a great mood
after hearing this song? One of the reasons I loved listening to the
song as a child was because it sounded so happy and carefree...the
way that some of our most memorable summers should be. And, it was a
very positive song with a very positive message which some might not
get until the very last verse.

The
first third of the song talks about a man walking through the park on
what he thought was the fourth of July.

TRIVIA:
It wasn't. The fourth of July fell on a Sunday in 1971, which was
the day that Robert Lamm strolled through Central Park which inspired
the song. However, the following Saturday was July 10...which was
exactly one year before the single was released onto radio!

But
the sights that he saw while he was waiting for Saturday to come were
very pleasant. Who doesn't love the sounds of people talking and
laughing? And who didn't love going up to the man selling ice cream,
wanting to purchase a popsicle or a fudgsicle? It takes me back to
the days in which my grandmother and grandfather were still alive and
the ice cream wagon used to drive by their house. I don't know how
much ice cream I bought from that man, but I estimate that I probably
helped him put a down payment on a house.

Heh...just
kidding.

TRIVIA:
You know in the first verse where Robert Lamm sings about that man
selling ice cream singing Italian songs? Well, in the actual lyrics
for the song, that lyric is represented by a question mark! You see,
the Italian lyrics were completely improvised on the spot. The first
part of the Italian lyric is “Eh Cumpari”, and then a bunch of
nonsensical Italian words following suit. I would imagine that if
someone from Italy were hearing this song for the first time, they'd
be a hundred shades of confused!

It's
not until we get to hear the second and third verses that the bigger
picture opens up.

The
song itself is filled with fantastic images, and every time I hear
this song I can picture all of it as if I were walking through the
park and gazing at all the people having fun. I could picture the
man singing in the park with his guitar with his desire to change the
world through music. I could see everyone laughing in the park. I
could see the people coming together to celebrate the love and the
freedom and the happiness that they felt in that park on that fourth
of July. And, it comes down to this rhetorical question.

Why
can't every day be like that?

Why
can't we all come together and celebrate love instead of tearing each
other apart to feed the hate? Why can't we all just celebrate life
and all the day-to-day joys that can come from simply living?

Well,
according to Chicago, they've been waiting for a long time for that
day. In fact, I think a lot of us have been waiting for a long time
for a day in which we can all just let loose and have fun enjoying
what life has to offer without worry or fear.

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Okay,
so for this week's edition of the Saturday Smorgasbord, I will be
doing a feature on either a book series, a comic book, or a magazine.
And, since it has been a while since I featured a children's book in
this space, I thought that there would be no time like the present to
feature a book that was specifically targeted for the preteen market.

The
problem was that I had difficulty narrowing down my choices. You
see, I read so many books as a kid that I have a difficult time
keeping track of all the ones that I remembered reading. There were
so many times in which I probably read the same book dozens and
dozens of times and not even realized it. But I didn't care. If the
story was decent and had a good plot with a little bit of humour
mixed in, I would happily read and re-read it.

Such
is the case of today's book spotlight. We're going back to the year
1986 for this children's book, as that was the year it was first
published, however my first experience with this book dates back well
over twenty years ago.

The
year was 1990. Or, was it 1991? I can't remember now. But I do
know that it was during the fourth grade, as Mrs. Moore was the
teacher at the time. And, I was in fourth grade during the 1990/1991
school year.

Elementary
school was a rather interesting time for me. There were some moments
that I could have done without. The embarrassing gym class memories,
the nasty kids who used to beat me up in the schoolyard, math
class...yeah, all those things I could do without.

But
one fond memory I have of Mrs. Moore's fourth grade class was the
breaks that we would have in between learning. You see, Mrs. Moore
was the type of teacher who liked to read us stories, and she always
had great taste in books. And she read the books with so much energy
and passion that it kept the class captivated the whole time, and we
were looking forward to the next chapter.

Believe
me, that was very important to me. My first grade teacher had a
really bad habit of killing every story that came into her contact
with her lacklustre delivery. She even made Dr. Seuss books sound
about as appealing as getting a tooth removed at the dentist.

Getting
back to the topic at hand, I was introduced to this book by Mrs.
Moore. It was already in her collection of books, and she decided to
read us this story in between math and humanities classes to break up
the routine a little bit. From the very beginning of this book, my
entire class was hooked on the story, and I personally found the book
very entertaining. I found it so entertaining that when it was
offered in the Scholastic Book Club one year, I ordered it, and read
it so much that the cover actually fell off.

Here's
a tip for all of you out there. If you're ever in a used book store,
don't dismiss those books that have dog eared pages and battered
covers. They were probably previously owned by someone who really
loved the book. In fact, the majority of the books that I absolutely
loved as a kid ended up in terrible condition after reading and
re-reading them several hundred times.

So,
what book could possibly be so good that I had to read it over and
over again?

First,
the word “dinkent” is supposed to be the word “delinquent”.
The reason why author Paul Kropp chose this word was because it was
how one of the main characters pronounced the word delinquent (the
character being kindergarten or grade one aged).

And,
secondly, it is that word that prompted a title change for this book
in the mid-1990s, as some parents felt that the word “dinkent”
was inappropriate for young children. Because as we all know, the
“Helen Lovejoys” of the world know exactly what's best for young
children.

Needless
to say, the book can also be found under the less threatening title
Fast Times With
Fred.
But, just for the sake of argument, we're going to use the original
title. I find it more fun.

So,
here's the story.

The
setting is typical suburbia America, and in the middle of the
neighbourhood, we have a typical middle-class family. There's a
mother, a father, and their two children. There's Justin, a
kindergarten/grade one aged kid (I used to know what their ages were,
but it's been a while since I last read the book), who is about as
optimistic as they come. He finds joy in anything and everything, is
very adventurous, and always says what is on his mind...regardless of
whether the word is pronounced correctly or not. And, there's Jason,
who is approximately five years older than Justin, and is a lot more
“mature” than Justin. He saves his money, does his chores, and
always talks down to people who he thinks don't measure up to him on
a level of intelligence.

Truth
be told, Jason kind of annoyed me in the book.

One
last thing I should note. Jason is referred to in the book as
Jay-Jay, as Justin can't say the word Jason yet.

The
book begins with Justin and Jason's parents struggling to find a
regular babysitter for the two boys. Despite Jason's assertions that
he is old enough to look after Justin and make sure that he doesn't
end up dead by the end of the night, his parents won't have any of
that. The problem is that the father's idea of who they should hire
doesn't exactly sit well with the mother. The father teaches at a
high school where one of his students is a sixteen-year-old boy named
Fred, who has gotten involved with the wrong crowd, and has gotten
into trouble. Justin and Jason's father thinks that by giving Fred a
chance to look after the boys, it may give him some much needed
responsibility and maturity needed to get out of trouble and stay out
of trouble.

Despite
the mom's objections, Fred becomes the babysitter of Justin and Jason
for a trial period. And, after taking one look at Fred with his
oversized clothing, gawky appearance, and unkempt style, Jason was
appalled, Justin was thrilled, and Jason and Justin's mother wanted
to run upstairs and lock the door, fearing that Fred was going to
come and rob the place.

Nevertheless,
Justin and Jason's father is still willing to give Fred a chance, so
the adventures of Justin, Jay-Jay, and the Juvenile “Dinkent”
begin.

And,
boy oh boy, do Justin and Jason get thrown into Fred's world in a big
way.

It
all starts with Fred's truck, which Justin happily points out “smells
like poo”. Apparently Fred holds down a job of transporting manure
in the back of his truck, which has seeped out of the bags and onto
the truck's cab. Justin didn't care too much, but Jason looked like
he wanted to be sick.

Then
Justin gets hungry and wants to have french fries from McDonald's and
a Ronald McDonald vacuum cleaner thrown in for good measure. Fred is
totally against going to McDonald's, claiming that Ronald McDonald is
demented, but Justin didn't care how “dented” Ronald McDonald
was. He wanted food. Jason meanwhile was very frustrated, as he had
to finance the trip to McDonald's. Of course, that trip to
McDonald's ended up being a disaster as an old face from Fred's past
comes back to haunt him, and Fred, Justin, and Jason are forced to
flee the fast food joint in fear...AFTER Jason already paid for the
meal.

Their
second attempt to grab a bite to eat didn't end much better, with
Fred pretending to pass out at the restaurant in an effort to avoid
paying for the meal (hmmm...maybe Mother was right about Fred after
all).

Finally,
Fred decided to take Justin and Jason to his house, where Fred
promised to put his culinary skills to good use by making them
homemade french fries and onion rings. And, it's here that we learn
just how bad a hand Fred was dealt. He lives in a house that
appeared as if a gentle breeze could knock it down, and Fred talked
about having to live with his older brother, who really didn't have
much love for him. The scenes at Fred's house certainly made Jason
learn a little more compassion, and he actually began to understand
why Fred was the way he was, and he started to treat Fred with a
little more respect – in spite of the fact that “Fred's Fries”
tasted like onions, and Fred's hatred of the Brady Bunch.

However,
an incident happens to Fred that causes him to re-evaluate everything
he ever believed about himself. It involves a razor, Fred's
eyebrows, and the mysterious man from Fred's past that Fred was
terrified of at McDonald's. And, by the end of the book, there's one
final confrontation between Fred and this man...and poor Justin and
Jason happen to bear witness to the whole thing.

But
don't worry...the ending of the book is quite satisfying. Fred
realizes that he can't live the way he is living anymore, and makes
changes to help him get out of the hole that he initially dug himself
into. But I think that Justin and Jason learned a little bit about
themselves just based on spending so much time with Fred.

At
any rate, it's a great story that I recommend to people. It's got a
great message, some humour, and really showcases the changes that the
characters all go through. And, considering that there were two
additional books created that feature Justin, Jay-Jay, and the
Juvenile “Dinkent”, I would say that Fred ended up doing quite
well for himself.

(Well,
I can only make that assumption, since I haven't read the sequel
books.)