So you have this great trip planned out, to a place you've really been longing to see, but you can't seem to convince anyone to come with you. What's a girl to do? Wait? I don't believe in waiting around for other people to make your travel dreams come true. I've travelled solo through a slew of countries from China to Cambodia and Scotland to Slovenia and it's been both fun and enlightening. Along the way I've heard every misconception about solo female travellers you can imagine, so I'm here to set the record straight with nine myths and one truth about solo female travel...

1. It's a scary world out there

Despite what movies like Hostel and Taken would have you believe, the world outside your nation's borders is not full of treachery and danger. As women, we are often taught to regard the unknown as threatening, which is unfortunate because it keeps us boxed up where we feel safe. The truth is that in many, if not most, places, if you travel intelligently and responsibly you are probably at least as safe as you would be in a major city at home.

2. You need to speak a foreign language

Personally I'm hopeless with languages, but luckily for me (and probably you) English is now the universal travel language and by far the most important one you can know. It's probably advisable to learn a few key phrases for the country you're visiting – things like ‘hello’ and ‘thank you’- but don't let your language inability stop you from going.

3. Don't talk to strangers

This advice was probably useful when you were five, but now that we’re all older it's just not practical. When you travel on your own everyone is a stranger until you make the effort to get to meet them. Then they are either really awesome fellow travellers, or interesting locals with stories to tell. Use your instincts to encourage the people worth knowing, and just walk away from anyone who makes you uncomfortable. It's totally okay to be rude when safety is concerned.

4. You should wear a fake wedding ring

Does anyone actually do this? I've seen it written in about a billion travel forums, but I don't think I've ever met anyone testing this ruse. If it makes you feel better give it a shot but the sad thing is that most men who are obnoxious enough to keep hitting on you when you’re obviously uncomfortable are not going to be dissuaded by a wedding band. If someone is bugging you, a far more effective strategy is to leave the area.

5. Eating alone is scary

Okay, let's talk about eating alone for a minute - everyone seems to be hung up on it, but have you ever actually done it? Before you go travelling try a test run at home - take yourself out to dinner and a movie. It will be fine, I promise. Nobody in the restaurant is going to care that you are sitting alone. Plus, if you are staying in hostels there is almost always somebody to tag along to dinner with if you want.

6. You will be lonely

Along those same lines, this also seems to be a common fear among potential solo travellers. Someday I'm going to get a t-shirt made that says “Alone does not equal lonely.” Learning to be alone is a really important skill, and you may find you actually really enjoy your own company. That said, the beauty of backpacking is that you pretty much never have to be alone if you don't want to be. Hostels around the world are bursting forth with friendly people who want nothing more than to hang out with you! Those friendships you make traipsing through the streets of Madrid in the middle of the night or piling into a traditional restaurant in Kyoto are beyond valuable.

7. All solo travellers are single

Every couple of months I get an email from someone who wants to travel, but their boyfriend does not. This should not hold you back. I know quite a few women who travel without their significant others. Many people enjoy the clarity that travelling alone gives them and come back to their relationships feeling refreshed. Or maybe they break up. In any case, it's certainly better than resenting your partner for keeping you grounded.

8. Travelling with anyone is better than being alone

I've seen people willing to attach themselves to total strangers because for some reason that seems better to them than being independent. This is a bad idea - people you genuinely like at home can turn into total monsters on the road. Just drag a bitchy, complaining college student who will only eat at McDonalds through Eastern Europe and you will see what I mean. If you do decide to travel with someone make damn sure they are on the same page as you.

9. “I could never do that”

I've heard this more times than I can count and I'm always puzzled. Solo female travellers are not some subspecies of hearty Indiana Jones type warrior queens battling their way across a dangerous world- they are regular people just like you. There is nothing I'm doing that you couldn't do yourself... if you wanted to.

And the one truth?

The truth is solo travel isn't just something you do when you can't find anyone else to come along. It's an incredibly rewarding and enlightening experience in its own right. You will learn about resources you never knew you had, and discover amazing things. You may even make some big life decisions. But one thing is certain – you’ll definitely have fun.

If you’re female and about to set on your own just remember this - it's okay to be nervous. Even now, after five years of travelling, I still get a bit jittery before I set off on my own. These worries usually disappear as soon as you arrive in a marvellous, new place. I've never regretted it, and neither will you.

“ This piece has confirmed everything that I thought about travelling solo. I am leaving on January 2nd to travel through Australia, New Zealand, Japan, and SE Asia. I am so thrilled for it. Incidentally I showed this piece to my parents, who naturally are a little worried about me, what with this being my first long term trip, and they seemed more reassured after reading it. 23 years old and ready for adventure.

XY said on 05/12/2014 at 5:54pm

“ This is great! Thanks so much for this :) I'm going on my first solo trip tomorrow and it's scary, but super exciting!

rick baldwin said on 30/11/2014 at 7:42pm

“ I admire women that travel on their own,they can usually find a kindred spirit at their hostel.

Marta Wilkerson said on 28/11/2014 at 2:26am

“ Great post! And I totally agree with what you've said about women and solo travel. Thanks a lot for sharing this!

Marta Wilkerson said on 28/11/2014 at 2:26am

“ Great post! And I totally agree with what you've said about women and solo travel. Thanks a lot for sharing this!

Hayley from Savvy Girl Travel said on 05/11/2014 at 1:20pm

“ Great advice! Especially about talking to strangers -- meeting people in your chosen destination is the most enriching part of the experience, IMHO.

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anu said on 25/10/2014 at 3:15am

“ thankyou for pulishing this...i'm 20 years old girl who is still studying..travelling alone is abig dream of me..this will be very interesting to my life...thank a lot...

Ciel said on 14/10/2014 at 7:08pm

“ First time backpacking and staying at hostels by myself. I am in my 60's and used the guidebook Lonely Planet to help me map my trip. Booked the hostels in advance. Had fun meeting people from all over the world and befriended them while on the trains and busses. I did meet some young American women traveling by themselves but would like to see more adventurous Americans oversees.

Fran Healey said on 29/08/2014 at 11:14am

“ I didn't notice harassment when I went to India for the first time at the age of 42.. The reason? I had 3 kids in tow, and was therefore a 'respectable mother'. Have been back many times since, alone, and even in my 50's and 60's, if I'm alone, I get harassed. It won't stop me. The 3 kids are now in their 30's and also travel solo. If arriving in a new country, I would usually get a pre-paid airport taxi to a pre-booked hostel, and take time getting my bearings, but it doesn't take long. Take care, ladies, and enjoy life.

Lostinarcadia said on 29/09/2011 at 12:14pm

“ I love travelling alone, and I love travelling with my husband or my best friend or my Mum. They're two different things. I'm as likely to be bored or lonely in company as I am alone. I can personally report that a wedding ring is no defence (in Paris, at least) but European men are perfectly willing to accept "No thanks" when they ask to join you. As a middle-aged married lady for 20 years, it was surprising but rather enjoyable to be hit on in such a polite way.

ade said on 13/07/2011 at 1:34am

“ Thanks for writing this. I am married. Because of my hubby and I have different idea of traveling, I do solo traveling more often. I visited south east asia counties alone, even also in countries that sometimes consider as danger places for women like India, Nepal, Srilanka, Pakistan... I enjoyed my solo traveling. So far everything is fine. Traveling alone enable me to interact better with local. I am not busy with my friend to make a deal or to decide something. I have freedom to choose where to go and where to stay. my husband know that traveling is my passion, and he is ok with that.

ade said on 13/07/2011 at 1:34am

“ Thanks for writing this. I am married. Because of my hubby and I have different idea of traveling, I do solo traveling more often. I visited south east asia counties alone, even also in countries that sometimes consider as danger places for women like India, Nepal, Srilanka, Pakistan... I enjoyed my solo traveling. So far everything is fine. Traveling alone enable me to interact better with local. I am not busy with my friend to make a deal or to decide something. I have freedom to choose where to go and where to stay. my husband know that traveling is my passion, and he is ok with that.

Pamela said on 12/07/2011 at 5:28pm

“ I'm traveling by myself for some months now and it's totaly true. I think that the problem for people to be alone is that most of them just can't deal with themselves, their on faults and silences. Silence is scary if you don't know how to deal with it.

Åsa said on 12/07/2011 at 5:21pm

“ Great blog you've got! I agree with you on everything except the eating out. After many journeys on my own I still hate eating out alone. Right now, I'm travelling alone on my motorcycle, riding 7000 km passing through 7 countries in 6 weeks.

Mela said on 12/07/2011 at 5:19pm

“ I spent hours last night writing about taking risks in life. Talking about how you can't let your fear of something keep you from at least trying. Oddly enough, one of the things I was referring to in my paper was traveling alone. My biggest fear, being a single, female was, in fact, going overseas by myself. I was having difficulty overcoming those fears and moving forward with my plans to travel, and then I found your article. Thank you so much for writing this! It has helped in tremendous ways, and I am confident now that I CAN do it. :)

Melissa said on 12/07/2011 at 5:03pm

“ Great article! I love to travel but I hate trying to recruit friends to join me on my adventures and I hate being stuck with a touristy group once I arrive. Great advice, thank you.

Jenn said on 12/07/2011 at 4:55pm

“ I am a 50 female who has spent much of the last 20 years traveling solo. I recently returned from 4 months in South America. What struck me as interesting was that I would meet young solo travelers from all over the world, Europe, Israel, Australia, New Zealand, etc. But I very seldom encountered young Americans, especially women. And the few times I did, they almost always were in a large group taking a short break from a study abroad trip. Just wondering, why don't 20 somethings from the US have the same sense of adventure that young people from other countries seem to?

Kara said on 12/07/2011 at 4:36pm

“ I'm travelling solo at the moment, but have only been on the road for about 1.5 weeks. Still feeling pretty nervous and alone but I'm hoping that passes soon. Can't wait to meet some solo female travellers to hang out with a bit more! Thanks for a great article.

Vic said on 12/07/2011 at 4:32pm

“ I am a solo female traveller also and agree completely with what you said. Especially the 'I could never do that comment' if i can do it I know anyone can!!
Eating alone I find is less intimidating abroad than at home, not really sure why!!

Helen said on 12/07/2011 at 4:19pm

“ After being dumped by my boyfriend 2 weeks after my 30th birthday, and a month before our backpacking trip to Thailand, I gave him the money back for his ticket and went alone. I didn't particularly want to be there with the guy who had broken my heart; I didn't want to miss out either. All of my female friends were already on holiday too, so I didn't really have a choice...
Yes, there were tears, bouts of feeling home sickand the fear that I'd get mugged or murdered, but I'm so glad that I did it. Travelling alone is wonderful and the people who you meet will amaze you. And just to prove how much I enjoyed myself....I'm trekking South America solo and head out there in 2 weeks. Travelling alone has changed me for the better and now my life is on a path I never thought it would take. Let the next solo adventure begin...

Tara said on 12/07/2011 at 4:12pm

“ I travelled the world with my boyfriend (and we survived!) but I wouldn't think twice about redoing it on my own. You do have to have you're head on your shoulders though and be sensible about what's safe and what's not but I think that's true for anyone that's travelling - female, male, solo or otherwise!

Tania said on 10/07/2011 at 12:53pm

“ Thanks for this post :) I am going to travel for the first time on my own in August. Your words encourage me!

Travis Blaser said on 08/07/2011 at 12:31pm

“ I'm not a female, but love this post. I recently left my job to take a nice long travel break for the next four months. I'm on day two in Ireland. I was so nervous prior to leaving because of some of the misconceptions you shared. I've just begun and I'm already having a great time!

Karl J said on 07/07/2011 at 5:00pm

“ There is so much truth to this post. For the record I'm not a girl, but I tell friends the second best decision of my life was studying abroad in New Zealand, and the first was hitchhiking over spring break on my own.
Take notes from Germans: they know how to travel!

Maria said on 05/07/2011 at 6:24pm

“ I enjoy traveling with a friend or lover - someone to share the Wow! factor with but I've met more interesting and helpful people when solo because I was alone.
I'm gregarious but solo heightens that a bit because if I want to know something I'll have to ask a stranger.
Be smart, like the post states - behave as your better judgement dictates when abroad or at home. This may mean you shell out a few extra dollars for a tuk-tuk or a cab or you leave the bar an hour earlier so you don't walk alone on deserted streets but it does NOT mean you stay on the porch and don't go at all.
Twenty years from now you'll regret things you DIDN'T do far more than the ones you did.

Vishal said on 05/07/2011 at 5:42pm

“ I'm not a girl but I hear you on point 8. My best friend and I went to a West Coast trip for a week and he was so inflexible and uncompromising that I, perhaps will never travel along with him again.

Amy said on 05/07/2011 at 5:18pm

“ Thanks for the article :) I've just started my first solo adventure around Thailand, Cambodia

Heather C said on 05/07/2011 at 4:39pm

“ I really appreciated what you have to say in this article as I have been a solo female traveller and found many of those myths said to me before a trip. I hope more women will have the courage to set out and travel alone at some point. It's well worth the experience!

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