The Sun is a very angry paper indeed this morning, readers. Because with just six months to go to Euro 2012, England's training facility looks like a building site. Probably because it is a building site and the facilities are being upgraded but no matter, the Sun is not pleased: "Despite the huge amount of work ahead, there was little evidence of urgency at the stadium yesterday," it screams, even though yesterday was Sunday and people are allowed days off, even if they are foreigners.

While we ponder whether Krakow's builders can do a bit of tiling in time for June, no fewer than two separate sources reckon Fabio Capello could leave Wayne Rooney out of his Euro 2012 squad, should the striker's three-match ban be upheld. Having said that, those sources are the Star and the Mirror, so that's only 0.3 of an international-standard source.

Partizan Belgrade's 17-year-old striker Lazar Markovic is so good every time he touches the ball on YouTube a little circle appears around him. That's enough to convince Bayern Munich, Chelsea and Liverpool he's worth £10m but it's Stamford Bridge he has his heart set on: "Chelsea is the place I want to play," he says in today's Sun. "I had all the pictures of the team on my wall at home back to when they had Gianfranco Zola." Plus, it's not like Fernando Torres will get a game ahead of him.

Chelsea is as pleasant a place as any to spend the morning so we'll stay there while André Villas-Boas eyes up Bayern Munich's Croatia midfielder Danijel Pranjic. Pranjic doesn't get a little circle around him when he appears on YouTube, isn't a wonderkid and doesn't have any posters of Gianfranco Zola on his wall – he's more of a Cameron Jerome man – but is keen to play in the Premier League. One man on his way out of Chelsea is Salomon Kalou, who will be off to Marseille on loan come January.

The Metro reckons Rio Ferdinand and Nemanja Vidic will be on the move from Manchester United before too long but they just copied that out of the Sunday Times. But we copied it off them, so let's not start getting superior.

Borussia Dortmund midfielder Mario Götze is so creative that Nasa have cloned his DNA and plan to sprinkle it on the surface of Mars. They estimate within five years the planet will be flourishing with weird and wonderful lifeforms, all of them able to split a defence with one well-timed pass. By then, Götze will be an established star at Arsenal – that's because Arsène Wenger plans to tempt Dortmund with an offer of £18m plus Andrey Arshavin.

If you dropped Carlos Tevez's DNA on Mars, it would be trying to get a move to Mercury by the end of the season because the weather's warmer and it's closer to his kids who are living on Venus with their mum. And there's only one good restaurant on Mars and that's at the top of Olympus Mons, which is 22km high. Anyway, for now he's on Earth and Milan and Manchester City could do a swap deal that would see Alexandre Pato move to the Premier League.