Legal humor. Seriously.

May 07, 2007

Man Who Expected to Die, But Didn't, Threatens To Sue Over Wrong Diagnosis

John Brandrick, a 62-year-old British man who was diagnosed with cancer two years ago, is threatening to sue his doctors because he hasn't died. Specifically, Brandrick went on a spending spree after being told that he had just one year to live. Having now lived twice that long, and after some additional tests, Brandrick has learned that he is actually (1) cancer-free and (2) broke.

"When they tell you you've got a limited time and everything, you do enjoy life," he told reporters. He enjoyed his by, among other things, quitting his job, traveling, and (something on everyone's list of 1000 things to do before you die) not paying his mortgage. But after a year or so of that, it was discovered that what doctors thought was a tumor was actually just an inflammation of the pancreas. Brandrick is pleased, and pissed. "I'm really pleased that I've got a second chance in life," he said, apparently so he can use it to sue his doctors, although his legal argument was a little convoluted: "[I]f you haven't got no money after all this, which," he admitted, "is my fault -- I spent it all -- they should pay something back." Admissions of fault should generally at least be placed in a separate sentence from demands that somebody else pay, that's my feeling.

According to the report, "Brandrick was left with little more than the black suit, white shirt and red tie that he had planned to be buried in" by the time he learned he was not ill. The hospital says it sympathizes, but had reviewed the case and believes the diagnosis was reasonable. Although it was about as wrong as a diagnosis can get.