December 2017 Babies

C section or natural

Bookmark Discussion

larooshti wrote:

Ok so I am scared shitless of giving birth, and it's my first time. I really don't know how I want to do it. Iam rather small down there that every time we have sex it's as if it was my first time, I don't see how I can push a head out of there without getting cut. Then I think why don't I just get a c section but I am worried about the recovery process. I really don't know what to do ! What are you ladies planning to have?

Not many docs will do an elective section without medical reason. Try to remember most vaginal recoveries are way easier than a csection days vs weeks. I end d up with an emergency c-section and it suuuuuucked. I was nervous about vaginal delivery for the same reason you were and my OB actually told me that I actually have (I think it's vagismus or something) where my muscles are just more tense and I require more foreplay & going slower for the first few minutes. Ativan and wine helped too when I wasn't pregnant lol. It took me til I was 30 thinking there was something physically wrong with me. Also maybe pushing a baby out will be good because I know a few people who say sex is way better after childbirth!

Trust me , your body is made for this and you can do it. I had my first with no meds. I was more scared of a needle in my back and all the risks associated with it than anything. I did not want a c section because the recovery is no fun. I saw my best friends go through it. Yes it's hard but like I said your body is made for it. Contractions are like waves, you just deal with one at a time. I kept moving until I couldn't anymore. When it's over you feel like superwoman and I was up and walking and just fine even though I did have a tear that needed stitches. Trust me as soon as you hold your baby it's over and so worth it.

It's totally normal to be scared, but it's what your body was made for. I was always scared my baby would get stuck too, but she didn't! She was 6 lb. 13 oz, and I only had 1 small tear that needed a stitch. It was no big deal. Plus, if you're scared of the pain, you can always get an epidural. BTW, your lady area will completely go back to normal. Nothing down there is any bigger than it was prior to the birth of my child. It's amazing what your body can do. Trust it, and your doctors!

no one's vagina on a normal day seems like a baby could fit through it, but lots of crazy changes happen to your body when you are in labor making it possible. totally normal to be nervous! but you body was literally built for this. a c section is a major surgery. the recovery from it is way more extreme than that of a normal vaginal birth. plus, there are health benefits for the baby to going through the birth canal. I'd recommend reading more about the natural birth process to familiaize yourself with what goes on. it'll help you feel more prepared and understand how you can definitely do this. the book "the birth partner" is a really good one talking about the stages of labor and what to expect. "the pregnant body book" is also a really great view of all the changes that happen to your body and baby throughout the pregnancy. it also goes into info about labor and post partum.

I had my first in an unmedicated vaginal birth and intend to do the same for this one. yes, labor is painful but it's productive pain and in the end you have a beautiful human that you created and grew in your body! it's such an awesome and empowering experience.

A c-section is major abdominal surgery, even if it's commonplace today. That means you'll be recovering from major abdominal surgery and trying to lift and feed and change a newborn who wakes up every 2-3 hours while you are recovering. It's great that c-sections exist for true emergencies but I don't think it will be any easier for you (actually harder recovery wise) than vaginal delivery.

I'm on the smaller side too, 5'6" and 110 lbs and had an unmedicated, vaginal birth of an 8lb 9oz baby (thanks to krispy kremes in the 3rd trimester-- lesson is lower amount of carb intake after 28 weeks or you will have a bulky baby!). And by the time i'd look down at my big, round belly and think about the tiny area he had to move through i would think " How?! Just how??" but then i'd take a deep breathe, remember women have been doing this for thousands of years, and remember Ina May Gaskin's admonition that vaginas were meant for this and the muscles and tissues expand and soften and your ligaments relax and your body knows exactly what to do. Vaginas are amazing in that way!

To give you an idea of the pain, to me and two other friends it felt (at first) like period cramping that comes and goes. Now i used to get BAD cramps on my period, but these start off gentle ( ie was that it?) and then back off. So unlike a period the pain is not constant, you get a break in between.

However, over several hours each set of contractions ( cramp feelings) gets stronger and they get closer together. Once you reach 5-6 cm's dilation it's like your body really reaches steam. I made that to transition (10 cms) in one hour)! By that time my own body felt like an out of control train and my only task was really to cope with being carried away by something completely out of control. Relaxation is key. If you fight it, it gets worse. If you relax it is much easier! To help me get through those most painful contractions it sounds goofy but i used 'horse lips' ( aka raspberries) because if your face lips are loose you cant be clenching your lower area ( as above so below). Just focusing on doing that one ridiculous thing with all of my might, really carried me through. Now when transition came i was shaking from the pain and turned to my midwife and said " i feel like im dying" and she said " yes it does feel like that but you can do it" very matter of factly. Transition is painful but quick!

After transition you finally get to push which is great bc you get to feel like you are actually DOING something about the pain now. I got to push in a warm birthing tub and i kid you not, feeling that warm water on my lower back cut the pain in half. Pushing is a whole different kind of pain but still manageable. I took my time pushing (1hr 15 mins) because the midwives told me if i go slower i can avoid a tear. I remembered that and though i felt burning as he crowned, i did not tear!

All of the sudden flop! I felt that heavy boy on my chest and i was just in a moment of ecstasy about #1 actually getting the baby out and #2 this amazing little human on my chest.

Oh and for afterpains! I highly suggest ( if you do go the vaginal route) dumping witch hazel on maxi pads and freezing them in zip lock bags to use on your bottom half after recovery. Those were lifesavers!

I'm the same way, it feels like the first time every time during sex too!! Planning to give birth in a hospital with an epidural. I actually am more scared to be cut open than I am to have a vaginal birth. I'm reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth which has been helpful. Even though it focuses on natural births, there's still a lot of useful and empowering info!

I had to have an emergency c-section and I would have preferred a natural birth. Recovery is hard and even 4 years later I have weird pains at the scar site if i bump it right or move wrong. I am also terrified of what is going to happen as I get bigger in this pregnancy, that scaring is going to stretch and I have already had stinging and pulling pains from just the little growing going on now.

I was deathly afraid of childbirth, so much so that I wasn't sure if I even wanted to have kids. I highly suggest watching The Business of Being Born on Netflix or I think you can even find it on YouTube. You get to watch actual births and it changed my entire perspective and now I see it as a very beautiful thing. It shows the comparison of hospital, home births, c-sections and when they are medically necessary as well.

I had an elective C-section. My doctor didn't advise it, he wanted me to try naturally first. But it was my choice and I was afraid of the whole labor thing. I was also 41. Not sure how old you are. It wasn't pain-free but it was certainly tolerable. The choice is yours, do what is right for you.

No doctor in his right mind will give you an unnecessary c section for your first birth. My advice? Join some birthing groups on Facebook, do research and make a birth plan. Take a birthing class. And my last piece of advice--desensitize yourself to the thought of birth. Watch as many birth videos as you can--graphic ones. That was the only way I got over the fear of my vagina stretching or needing an episiotomy.

Now I didn't get to use any of that because I ended up with an emergency c section my first time. And the recovery SUCKS. If you can avoid recovering from surgery and being a new mom...DO IT. You do not want a c section you don't absolutely HAVE to have.

I've spoken to so many people who have had both and they said the recovery for vaginal birth is so much easier. Honestly, I think morning sickness is worse than labor. Don't freak yourself out! Once they put that baby on your chest, the pain becomes a distance memory!

I was terrified too! Sex has always been painful for me so I thought I could never do it. But guess what? I did.

I had an epidural, I did not feel ANYTHING. I was induced at 42 weeks and was in labor for 13 hours but I dilated from a 4 to a 10 in 45 minutes. He tried to come out forehead first and I ended up with an episiotomy and a 4th degree tear.

Even though that sounds bad, it really wasn't. I felt completely normal after birth, no pain at all. After a few days my stitches started to sting when I peed but other than that I was beyond fine. (They also had me on narco 7.5) Within 3 weeks me and DH were DTD and it hurt way less than before.

I couldn't imagine having a c-section. My best friend had one and she was miserable! Her recovery took like 3 months.

My first was a vaginal delivery and it went so fast! When I got pregnant with my second, I was determined to go no meds.

But at 38 weeks, I was developing preeclampsia and somehow that 9lb turd flipped and was lodged in my ribcage.

So c-section was done and my recovery was horrendous!

I was a single mother for my first, so while I'm not sure if it was just the fact I had no choice but to recover quickly, but the only pain I remember was my episiotomy that was healing 5 days later, and it only was uncomfortable when I peed.

My csection? I felt like I was literally ripped open, I couldn't even cough without crying. It took weeks for me to walk without wincing, and I remember gasping in fear when I took my last pain pill 3 weeks laters.

I had my husband to care for me and it still was something I wished never happened.

I am not a candidate for a VBAC, and while I know the end result is to have our baby as healthy as possible for me and him, I can't help but be scared out of my mind!

Trust your body, it knows what it's capable of doing, even when you don't think it's possible!

As a nurse I would strongly recommend vaginal birth over elective c section. However, if there is a medical reason for the c section then just do it. It's a much longer and more painful recovery but Iv seen a few mums refuse c sections when they were needed and it almost always ends up in a stressful emergency c section.

There is less chance of bleeding out with vaginal delivery as well. At the end of the day it's your choice and I hope that your medical respects your decision :)

The material on this website is provided for educational purposes only and is not to be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment, or in place of therapy or medical care. Use of this site is subject to our terms of use and privacy policy.