Conservatives also strive to get rid of protective agencies and social programs. The deficit Bush created through irresponsible tax cuts and a costly war in Iraq will require drastic budget cuts to remedy. Those cuts, conservatives know, won’t come from military spending, particularly when they raise the constant specter of war. Instead, the cuts will be from what Conservatives have begun to call “non-military, discretionary spending;” that is, the programs that contribute to the common good like the FDA, EPA, FCC, FEMA, OSHA and the NLRB. Yet another success for the conservative agenda.

I know that we Democrats have a difficult time coming up with a “ word” explanation of what we stand for to compete with the Republican “lower taxes” line. However the above paragraph seems to have the seeds of what I’m looking for. The fact that the common good is best served by programs like FDA, EPA, FCC, FEMA, OSHA and the NLRB... at least when they’re run well and for the people speaks volumes. Yes, everyone can pick nits with these agencies, but “lower taxes” has the same problem and they overcome it (for example, “lower taxes” was never to imply that the military shouldn’t get all the funding they need).

Maybe my “elevator pitch” for the democrats is something like:

“A well-managed government serves people best”

Still too many words, but it hits the points I want.

It’s NOT Incompetence

When Progressives shout “Incompetence!” it obscures the many conservative successes. The incompetence frame drastically misses the point, that the conservative vision is doing great harm to this country and the world. An understanding of this and an articulate progressive response is needed. Progressives know that government can and should have a positive role in our lives beyond simple, physical security. It had a positive impact during the progressive era, busting trusts, and establishing basic labor standards. It had a positive impact during the new deal, softening the blow of the depression by creating jobs and stimulating the economy. It had a positive role in advancing the civil rights movement, extending rights to previously disenfranchised groups. And the United States can have a positive role in world affairs without the use of its military and expressions of raw power. Progressives acknowledge that we are all in this together, with “we” meaning all people, across all spectrums of race, class, religion, sex, sexual preference and age. “We” also means across party lines, state lines and international borders.

The mantra of incompetence has been an unfortunate one. The incompetence frame assumes that there was a sound plan, and that the trouble has been in the execution. It turns public debate into a referendum on Bush’s management capabilities, and deflects a critique of the impact of his guiding philosophy. It also leaves open the possibility that voters will opt for another radically conservative president in 2008, so long as he or she can manage better.

...

Conservatism itself is the villain that is harming our people, destroying our environment, and weakening our nation. Conservatives are undermining American values through legislation almost every day. This message applies to every conservative bill proposed to Congress. The issue that arises every day is which philosophy of governing should shape our country. It is the issue of our times. Unless conservative philosophy itself is discredited, Conservatives will continue their domination of public discourse, and with it, will continue their domination of politics.

“If I can’t fucking cut the budget, I’m going to blow up every shuttle until they can’t fly any more. I’m sick and tired of having this group of ‘oh look at what the Government can be successful at if we just put our minds to it’ bastards sitting around. Did flying to the moon really help anyone? Hell no. So if I can’t kill it off, I’m going to make more shuttles *esplode* until their aren’t any more left, or becomes unpopular enough so that I finally *can* end the entire NASA program. Oh, yeah, I’ll keep the Military Space Program which costs 100x what we spend on NASA, and I’ll certainly keep the put-satelites-in-space-for-corporations-for-free program that costs 50x what we spend on NASA... those are worth it. But learnin’ about space rocks? Fuck that. And fuck anyone that ever voted for John Glenn.” --Sincerely, George Bush

Ok, it wasn’t a direct quote. I was exaggerating and I’m sure someone can correct me about the financial figures. For the real story, you’ll have to read this:

Yeah, that FUCKING Bill Clinton can’t keep his god damn dick in his pants! Well, Amerikka, we’ll be different! We aren’t gonna run this country like a bunch of fuckin’ frat boys! Vote for us ‘cause we hate government, thus we’ll run it right! Just like the restaurant down the street that you love so much that has the owner that hates to cook food! That makes sense, right?

Oh, and when disaster strikes in a blue state with a lot of black people not only will we delay 5 days and let those people starve, but...

The GAO, the investigative arm of Congress, found at least $1 billion in disaster relief payments by the Federal Emergency Management Agency were improper and potentially fraudulent because the recipients provided incomplete or incorrect information when they registered for assistance. (GAO report)

Besides the bottle of champagne, the GAO uncovered records showing $1,000 from a FEMA debit card went to a Houston, Texas, divorce lawyer, $600 was spent in a strip club, and $400 bought “adult erotica products,” all of which auditors concluded were “not necessary to satisfy legitimate disaster needs.”(Full Story)

“It bothers me as an American that resources that were intended to help victims of this tremendous tragedy were spent this way,” said Hooters Chairman Bob Brooks, referring to the champagne from Hooters.

Now stop voting for that guy that can’t keep his dick in his pants, and vote for us. Getting your dick sucked by a chubby chick is DISGUSTING! Gotta get rid of that man and vote for a Republican! We’ll just spend a BILLION DOLLARS of relief money on divorces, strip clubs and porn. Ya hoo!