Phobia of Fireworks

by Jamella
(Philippines)

I have a very major phobia of fireworks or things that explode. From balloons bursting to total explosions. I had this phobia ever since I was a kid, at the precise age of 4.

My family was wealthy back then and whenever there was any festivities, they will not be complete without any fireworks. My father, especially my older brother and sister, loves them. We would have a stash of them reserved for several festivities. Unfortunately, all of their fireworks were loud ones, the ones that will scare you when it explodes. Before, I had my grandma to cover my ears when it's New Year 'coz we never miss it without any fireworks. I would go to vicious panic mode whenever I hear them, even when a balloon pops. My heart will start racing, my breath becomes uneven and I start trembling.

My parents scolds me every year when it's New Year for not showing up to the exact moment the clock strikes 12. They say I should become brave about it and deal with it because it's tradition for us Filipinos. I try but miserably fail every year. I just hide deep in my bed when the fireworks session of the night start.

To be honest, I am quite shy when I mention this phobia of fireworks to my friends and family.

Now that's New year again here, I managed to write this with the resistance to hide under the covers and plug my earphones. My cousins and brother are now starting to use those loud fireworks, scaring the crap out of me. Especially the Goodbye Philippines my brother bought.

I just hope the government would assign the total ban of fireworks so I could relax immensely every year.