looking for advice

Hi Everyone, it's great to have a place to seek advice and read about other's situations. I'm hoping you can help me... I've been married now for a few years and I'm kind of at wits end with my sex life. My wife and I fooled around a lot before we got married, but didn't actually have sex until the honeymoon. The first six months we were in the mood several times a day...then she got a job that kept her stressed out all the time and there was about a six month period when we didn't have sex at all. She now has a less stressful job but it's been difficult getting back in the swing of things. The more time that goes by, the worse she feels about it, and think that she has dissappointed me. I don't know what to do anymore...Is any of this normal for still somewhat newlywedds?

Gold Member

Unfortunately stress can be a real "mood killer" which can lead to a sense of being disconnected from each other. Why not try to reconnect but without a view of having sex...give her a foot massage etc.? Almost as if you are wooing her all over again. I am certain that things can once again be the way that they are...it just takes patience, support and understanding...oh yes, and a whole lot of love!

Gold Member

be spontaneous....instead of contemplating what the two of you should...maybe a candle lit dinner for two...a nice romp in a jacuzzi.....also you might wanna try role playing....you take the initiative...tell her she has been a bad postal employee for losing ya mail and you are going to punish her...just use ya imagination....let us know how things work out if you accept any of the advice given bythe members..or even if you don't ..good luck....

Gold Member

I second the whole 'date all over again' thing. Regardless of your orientation or your partner status, everyone likes to be wooed and wined and dined and basically made to feel special in a world where we are certainly not always made to feel so. Our partners should be where we get this from and it should not just stop when you have 'sealed the deal' by getting married or moving in or just getting to the stage where the casual fucking turns into something much more meaningful.