On this blog, I write mostly about travel, writing, book reviews, and interviews with a variety of children's authors. On my other blog (Victorian Scribbles) I write about the Victorian Era. I hope you will check both out often.
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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Rachael's Third Challenge

Rachael's third challenge for the campaign has come round, and once again it's quite a challenge. Here are the rules:

Write a blog post in 300 words or less, excluding the title. The post can be in any format, whether flash fiction, non-fiction, humorous blog musings, poem, etc. The blog post should show:

that it’s morning,

that a man or a woman (or both) is at the beach

that the MC (main character) is bored

that something stinks behind where he/she is sitting

that something surprising happens.

Just for fun, see if you can involve all five senses AND include these random words: "synbatec," "wastopaneer," and "tacise." (NB. these words are completely made up and are not intended to have any meaning other than the one you give them).

Opal finger-combs her straggly gray hair, wriggling her toes in the sand. She stares at the rose and golden clouds, trying to imagine faces in them the way she did as a girl. No luck. She turns her head and watches Ralph wading in the dawn-flecked waves. A scene meant to recapture earlier days, along with last night’s bonfire and roasted hotdogs, along with sleeping under the star-powdered sky.

“Opal!” Ralph waves a flabby arm. Opal sighs and looks farther up the shore, where a young couple in tank suits and flippers stride toward the waves. The salt in the air has a sulfurous undertone, probably from seaweed strewn along the sand, although it seems behind her as well. Behind her, too, a shrill cry cuts through the rumbling surf and lapping waves.

Damn seagulls. Last night they kept pacing around their hot-dog roast, and Ralph would throw pieces of bun!

Frankly, Opal would like to go home and shower off all the sand. She swallows, thinking of buckwheat pancakes drenched with sweet, viscous honey, topped with foamy Cool Whip. Then she’d stretch out on the sofa and watch re-runs of Tacise. Morning after morning, criminals prove no match for Tacise. No thief is wily enough. No drug lord’s hideaway secure. The actor who plays Tacise is a Republican, too. Opal nods to herself. She has read his biography on Wikipedia.

“Opal!” Ralph calls, louder this time, hands cupped around his mouth. His face crinkles with worry. A breeze swallows his next word. It sounds like wastopaneer! Or maybe, what’s it near? But that makes no sense.

“Watch out! It’s nearer!” he almost screams.

The shrill cry behind her comes again. Opal turns in time to see the Synbatec’s wings billow wide before enfolding her.

I was a bit confused as to what enfolding her entails in the story but I guess that's part of the point for me to infer what happens next. I just cant seem to make up my mind whether its wings just knocked her over or if Opal was picked up and whisked away or if she ended up dying from a heart attack. lol, but I enjoyed the story. It was fun, Great job.

I've been selected as a judge for the final challenge in the Third Platform Building Campaign - and I'm happy to announce that your entry has been chosen to advance to the next phase of judging as a quarter-finalist.

Oh Elizabeth! This is fantastic! I really enjoyed it - love the little details you have included that make it so real - straggly gray hair, flabby arms, the actor who is a Republican. I love their names too, and the way you got those words in. Very well done indeed. :)

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About Me I write mysteries, short stories, children's books, and poetry.

Thanks for stopping by. I'm a happily married author who loves to travel to Spain and India with my husband and blog about the many things I uncover in my research and travels.
I write mysteries, historical fiction and children's books. I hope you will visit often and leave comments and tell me about yourself.

The Best of Vine Leaves Literary Journal 2012, Jessica Bell

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A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, Hattie Big Sky, The Giver, Steinbeck's Ghost, Esparanza Rising, Circle of Gold, The Tale of Despereaux, Milagros, Girl from Away, The TreeKeepers, The Book Thief, The Green Glass Sea, The Cuckoo Clock, A Wrinkle In Time, Ozimund's Quest, The Jesse James Scrapbook, A String in the Harp, The Lightning Thief, The Lost Years of Merlin, Bridge of Time, The Haunting of Charles Dickens