Thursday, January 12, 2006

Second Cup, I'm Sorry I Strayed

I seem to be on this auto-piloted mission to weed out all things toxic from my diet. I've been on a roll lately so maybe I convinced myself that cutting out all things would be a glorious breeze. Look at me, I'm so wonderfully pure! I read somewhere -- and I'm paraphrasing -- that if a change feels like you're grating your face across an asphalt driveway, then maybe you're not ready for that particular change. My face, people, is being grated.

I'm a Don't Give Up! girl or more honestly, a Stop Being a Fucking Baby girl so when I decided to not drink a second cup of coffee which I usually enjoyed in the afternoons, I knew it might be a little difficult. I knew that it would take my body some getting used to, some adjusting. I'll drink some Green Tea, I told myself. I'll drink more water! Yes! Because I'm a walking picture of health and health knowledge! It's day 12 and if someone doesn't get me a goddamn cup of coffee this afternoon, my foot is knocking out some teeth. Wwwaaaaaa, why did I abandon you, oh sweet life elixir?

It's not that I object to the coffee so much. I don't think there's that much wrong with two cups of coffee a day. But in 2006, I no longer wanted to flush my hard-earned cash down the Starbucks toilet every single day, sometimes twice. The other reason for less coffee was that I truly needed to cut back on the amount of soy creamer I was using. I mean, why was I adding it TO coffee when I really should've just splashed some coffee into the creamer carton? Or maybe I should've just put a straw in the carton and cut out the coffee beard all together. When I was drinking Starbuck americanos on the daily I was buying soy creamer every five days. Now THAT'S embarrassing.

This year I've been making my own coffee -- which is still delicious with agave and 1/2 the creamer previously used -- and I take it work in my lovely Lupe & Carmen car mug. Satisfaction! But in the afternoon, me, green tea and my scrumptious Pecan Pie Larabar look at each other and lament over Mami's little friend, Afternoon Coffee. WWwwwwhhhhhyyyyyyy have I forsaken thee? Why do we hurt the ones we love?

I have two confessions. 1. I'm PMS'ing so missing the coffee at this particular time is amplified in soul-crushing ways. 2. I have not been sleeping enough. I like to go to sleep at midnight though I should not. I should get up at 6:15 which I do not like. I try to go to sleep around 11, but that's when my boyfriend Jon Stewart wants to be adorably witty for me -- and now that Howard Stern has graced us with his absence -- go be on fucking satellite already -- they now play SNL reruns! At 11, the house is dark and soundless. Even Husband is asleep. It's one of my favorite times because I sink into my bed and I can feel limbs and muscles unwind. And then I'm ecstatic about the fact that funny and smart people want to entertain me on TV at that time. But 6am comes so quickly, you guys.

In other news, my spring fiction workshop is supposed to begin tonight and I've decided instead to deem Thursday "Mami Thursdays" and I'm going to now take yoga on this day. And then go to a cafe and write. Dreamy! I decided this all today. I told Husband, "Yo, I'm embarking on yoga now. (smack of the lips) Check me out. Next I'll cultivate fine-hair dreads and wear hemp trousers." He was working on the computer and most likely heard, "wwa wa wa wan wo wa hemp wawa wa." He perked up on "hemp."

Ok, fuck this. I'm making some lunchroom coffee right this instant so I can be all wound up & gassy for my first yoga class. Awesome.

13 comments:

Dagnabit! You're perhaps the sixth person who has told me that he or she will not be in workshop this term. To whom am I going to pontificate? (To be more accurate, to whom am I going to pontificate who will actually know what I'm talking about? Without peers, it's going to be a long three hours for me.

Actually Jonathan, you were one of four reasons I wanted to remain in workshop. Lisa being one. Claudia and Honduro (Steve), the others. Believe me when I say I will sorely miss your pontification. I did love that most people looked at you blankly, nodding even, when you had just semi-insulted them with such cutting articulation. Can you please email me? I think I've misplaced your eaddress. mamirivera1@yahoo.com.

Thanks Amstar! I think this new venture will be beneficial too. I'm a little nervous. Hooray for Peets.

Really, D, be kind to yourself and have that afternoon cup of coffee. Well-being comes from obeying the not only the letter but the spirit of all the health rules we choose to impose on ourselves. The ultimate goal for all this healthy eating and exercise is for our minds and spirits to be more alive, and if a cup of coffee is going to make you happy in the afternoon than please please have it.

I like your Mami night. I need a Mami night. Instead I have work night and sometimes bookclub night. This past Wed. I had acumama night and it was incredible. I felt rejuvenated and found a little piece of myself again.

I need to get a workout groove going on and better eating as well. You've been quite inspiring and I LOVE to hear about your veganism and changed lifestyle habits.

I gave up my beloved joe about 7 years ago and not by choice. I had the worst seafood poisoning of my life and weird as it sounds, it changed my tastebuds and I completely lost my taste for coffee. It turned bitter and metal in my mouth and that was it. Of course I'm downing black tea in large quantities so I'm not caffeine=free, but at least I'm filling myself with anti-oxidants!! Yo!

You make me laugh. just so you know you inpired me to buy a raw bar yesterday at whole foods. I was walking down the bar isle and thought of you, so I bought a Lara(I think) bar and it was really good. You've actually inspired me to put a bit more thought into my vegitairan diet, less junk, less dairy. There ya go, changing the world one blogger at a time :)

GW & Melanie - I did have my coffee and enjoyed every last drop. ha! I am a happier person because of it.

Michelle - we can all share Jon. There is enough Jon to go around.

acumama (and everyone for that matter especially mommys) - I HIGHLY recommend a You Night if you have a partner willing to give you that. I spend a lot of time with the family and I feel no guilt having one night to recharge. It took me years to be able to get that though and before I could do it regularly, I would just do it when I could, like you just did. Even when it was just me and Maya many years ago, I'd have friends or babysitters watch Maya for a couple hours on a weeknight so I could just go read, guilt free, at a cafe or stare out the window for a couple hours with my beloved coffee.

Heather - what flavor did you get of the Larabar? As a former pseudo expert on nutritional bars, I do think they are the best. I'm so glad I've inspired. Wow, that makes me feel great. Thanks.

Yoli -- I can see an addiction sprouting for the yoga. Will post more later on the Yoga Experience.

About Me

I love my husband because he’s kind of a dick. But he’s soft with me and his lip quivered at our wedding. I love my daughters. They’re brilliant and funny, and I’m here to kick down mountains that get in their way. I’m a vegan, and all is right in my world because of it. I can still beat the neighborhood in HORSE because I have a bad-ass set shot. Justice is served well through fair food, and scarcity would be a myth if we shared more, damn. Yo soy una mezcla which leaves me mixed up sometimes. My commute bike’s name is Loops and she’s my favorite kind of car. I wish I had written Chronicle of a Death Foretold. I’ve endured 54 hours of tattoo work. But above all, I fiercely believe in the underdog.

"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!" - Kerouac (As told to me by Marigoldie)