Books of Interest

Books on Domestic Violence

Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence by Philip W. Cook Praeger Publishers 1997 Westport, CT ISBN: 0-275-95862-0 Amazon's summary: "When most people think of domestic violence, images of battered women or abused children come to mind. But there is another side to this issue that is not as familiar--abused men. This unique book is the first to comprehensively examine this important but neglected social issue. Already praised by a diverse spectrum of readers--from "Dear Abby's" Abigail Van Buren, to the nation's leading domestic violence researcher, to those in law enforcement and counseling--this work is sure to spark controversy and discussion. It offers gripping, emotional stories, self-help for victims, and provocative insight into public issues, and provides a basic reference source for professionals. Abused Men presents practical solutions for reducing domestic violence, whether its victims are male or female."

Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused by Dean Tong. Description: "This book is a training manual for the defense for those falsely accused. By providing actual case studies, his own included, the author shows the destruction that is incurred by families due to false allegations of child abuse. Having been falsely accused himself, the author gives the pitfalls and shows how to combat and defeat false abuse allegations. " (added 9/13/01) Note that purchasing using this link gives a 5% donation to SAFE, with additional cost to you.

Reclaiming Your Life: the Gay Man's Guide to Love, Self-Acceptance, and Trust, by Rik Isensee. One reader on Amazon reviewed the book as so: "This book was formerly titled "Growing Up Gay in a Dysfunctional Family: a Guide for Gay Men Reclaiming Their Lives". The author goes very indepth in describing the makeup of abusive, homophobic families and the impact it has on a gay child growing up. While I myself did not grow up in this type of environment, I still learned a great deal about my own reactions to outside homophobia and that for years I internalized it and developed negative thinking patterns about myself; etc. I thank the author for writing this book, not only for helping me identify problems I needed to work through, but for helping me realize how to develope the skills needed to self nurture and stop internalizing homophobia. Above all, this book is especially relevant to abuse survivors, it will definitely help you."

Waking to Tears: Losing a Loved One to Violence by Traci Bieber Nelson "It is a compilation of stories from people across the globe who have lost a loved one to violence. One of the aspects of the book is that the author includes many different types of violence, including male victims." (added 9/26/01) Note that purchasing using this link gives a 5% donation to SAFE, with additional cost to you.

No More Secrets: Violence in Lesbian Relationships. Amazon's description: In No More Secrets: Violence in Lesbian Relationships, University of Manitoba women's studies professor Janice Ristock presents one of the first studies of lesbian domestic violence. Basing her work on interviews with victims and social workers, she evaluates firsthand testimony, piecing together how and why lesbian relationships become violent and how the medical and criminal justice systems react when they do. The book concludes with suggestions for battered individuals and for wider community action.

Women to Women Sexual Violence-Does She Call it Rape?, by L. Girshick, Northeastern University Press, 2002. The American Library Association's review on Amazon's webpage says: "Perhaps the most isolated crime victims are lesbian and bisexual survivors of woman-to-woman sexual violence. Multifaceted sexual-identity issues combine with shame and institutionalized heterosexism to make society unable to acknowledge such assaults. The legal system, women's support services, and the lesbian community are just beginning to name such behaviors, let alone confronting and dealing with them. Women's studies professor Girshick breaks new ground as she plumbs the experiences and thoughts of 70 women, gleaned from a nationwide U.S. survey and in-depth interviews. She documents the women's responses to the violence, whether they received or were denied aid, and whether silence was imposed on them. Her insightful and provocative work well may stir controversy even as it sheds light on a previously shadowed subject. Dedicated to "those who are still silenced," the book also powerfully explores the need for community and such preconceived notions and myths as lesbian utopia. A worthy addition to the sociology of violence in women's lives"

Lobel, K (Ed.). Naming the Violence: Speaking Out About Lesbian Battering. by Kerry Lobel, Seal Press: Seattle, WA, 1986. The Publishers Weekly on Amazon's website says this: "From Publishers Weekly Sponsored by the Lesbian Task Force of the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, this book is ``by and for battered lesbians and those who work to support their empowerment.'' Contributors note that the topic is especiallydifficult for lesbians because, as Barbara Hart, an activist lawyer, states in the preface, lesbian battering ``contradicts our belief in the inherent nonviolence of women,'' and publicity about it ``may enhance the arsenal of homophobes.'' Lobel alternates personal histories with commentary by counselors, activists and others who offer advice on how to treat victims and how to deal with the problem generally. (They note the many parallels to man-woman battering cases.) The victims' stories are wrenching: one battered woman has become so suspicious that when she sees an adult and several girls flying kites in a park (while she writes her contribution to this volume), she remarks only, ``I hope that their relationship is as loving and playful as it looks.'' This collection constitutes a challenge to lesbians who abuse their lovers and to those who tolerate such abuse."

The Anger Workbook for Women: How to Keep Your Anger from Undermining Your Self-Esteem, Your Emotional Balance, and Your Relationships by Laura Petracek. Description: "Although men and women can articulate anger in very different ways, books on managing problem anger tend to focus on men and their tendency toward more violent anger expression. This workbook addresses the unique concerns of women with anger problems. Rigid social patterning, the book argues, conditions many women to stifle or deny their anger, and this repression can cause a range of other psychological problems. Others experience violent, outwardly focused anger. Whichever pattern your anger follows, you'll learn healthier ways to express your anger from this workbook. Building on women's tendency to be more relational than men, this book advocates interactive techniques as a primary method of anger management intervention. It integrates elements of narrative, art, and music therapy into a powerful set of anger management tools. Cognitive behavioral and attitude adjustment exercises help you limit the power of anger-triggering situations. Worksheets and assessments guide you in an examination of family-of-origin issues that might contribute to your problems with anger. Sections of the workbook explore the connection between anger and substance abuse, mood disorders, and spirituality, as well as the issue of domestic violence in lesbian households." (added 4/19/05) Note that purchasing using this link gives a 5% donation to SAFE, with additional cost to you.