Thursday, February 6, 2014

ANON vs. ANON.

Comment Boxes have never been the same.

When Allen Ginsberg wrote “Jaweh and Allah Battle” he hadn’t
surfed or slalomed the Internet, never mind the Comment Box at the Blog. In his
poem, each deity does battle—“Jaweh with atom bomb // Allah cuts the throat of
infidels”—according to his resources, but neither has anything on Anon vs. Anon
in Comment Box. Nope, nope-a-dope.

There is no amity, only enmity. It is The Anonymityville Horror. For inspiration, Anon reads AnonymausII while Anon reads The
Secret Life of Walter Anonymitty. They type simultaneously. Briefly, they
are the same person, briefly they wear the same knickers. They both listen to
Modest Anonymouse. It is not anime; it is anonyme.

Friends of Anon confront him about his problem, and demand that
he seek help. Across town, the same happens to Anon. They both wind up at
Anonymous Anonymous, a support group where Anonymous can share about Anonymity,
without revealing identities. At the Facebook page, Anon leaves incendiary
comments, as does Anon.

The weather service forecasts an ice storm, then dismisses an
ice storm. The storm arrives and slicks the inclines and the declines and the
level, it brittles the power lines, which yearn to break, and do. Anon cannot type
word verification and Anon cannot type word captcha and Anon cannot type “fiery
provocation” and Anon cannot type “arse weed.”

Anon dreams of being the definitive Anonymous, the Eponymous
Anonymous, as does Anon. In the end, though, they are “samey.” They are
Anonymous Synonymous, Anon and Anon. The nuances of their ire do not amount.
No. What they have is: the next Blog Post and the next Comment Box, in which,
they will encounter each other . . . anon.

I WAS HOT, ONCE

About This Blog

"Blood And" was a nickname given me by a guy named Clifford, a law enforcement professional who regularly whupped me at the karate studio I attended for six years, as a teenager. I would walk into the studio and Cliff would say, "Blood And!" Then we'd both throw a fist into the air.