“Tanya, it’s Seb,” Mum calls through the bathroom door. “Where?” I shout. “On the phone,” Mum calls. “On my way,” I shout, hauling myself out of the bath, pulling my towel round me. “So, the thing about garden birds is that they’re an artificially sustained population,” Mum is saying into the phone when I make […]

“Hello?” I say, answering the flat phone at seven o’clock last night. “Hello, my lovely,” Seb says. “My darling,” I say, chopping up a courgette for The Omelette. “How were the exams?” “Fine,” Seb says. “They weren’t much of a challenge, and I just have to pass them. The pass mark is pretty low.” “Oh, […]

“Sending lots of helpful exam-winning thoughts. Hope they go really well xxx,” I text Seb at 9.37am today. “Thanks xxx,” he replies. He had two exams today at 11am and 1pm. It’s now 4.26pm. Surely he is out of there by now… “Exams are fun. You just get in there and show them what you […]

“So, did you have an exam today, my darling?” I ask Seb when he calls last night. “No,” he says. “We were out doing fieldwork and…” “When do they start?” I say, opening the dishwasher, taking the cups out and putting them in the cupboard. “I think the Ecology ones start this week,” Seb says. […]