As I began to love myself I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living against my own truth.

Today, I know, this is “AUTHENTICITY“.

As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me.

Today I call it “RESPECT“.

As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow.

Today I call it “MATURITY“.

As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment, so I could be calm.

Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE“.

As I began to love myself I quit steeling my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm.

Today I call it “SIMPLICITY“.

As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything the drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism.

Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF“.

As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time.

Today I discovered that is “MODESTY“.

As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING is happening.

Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT“.

As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But as I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally.

Today I call this connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART“.

We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born.

I have recently made an observation. I want to be seen and acknowledged. In the past several months I have started an intensive personal development overhaul. After many, many years of trying to hide and trying to blend in I am realizing how empowering it feels to be acknowledged.

I put on weight. It is a protection device for me. I also tend to wear almost all black and grey. Up until the last few months, my closet had very little color in it. The interesting thing is my outsides weren’t matching my insides. I felt colorful, vivacious, and bubbly. But outwardly, I was projecting that I was recluse and didn’t want to be approached.

In the last few months I have lost weight. I have intentionally ended relationships that were not supporting me the way I needed them to. I began wearing colorful clothing. I stopped wearing layers upon layers of clothing to the gym. I started showing up in the world as ME. With all of my imperfect perfection, I have made my statements that I deserve to love and to be loved in this world.

What has been happening is nothing short of amazing. My business is responding by starting to send me people that are ready to step into their own selves. I am meeting new people. And today, I am noticing that people are greeting me by name. The trainer at the gym this morning said “Hi Amy”, I received a text that said “Good Morning Amy.” I am working in my coffee shop office today and when the barrista handed me my latte she said “Have a great day, Amy!”

It feels great to be acknowledged. It makes me realize that despite my struggles, despite the dark places I have been, I DO deserve a place in this world. I DO deserve to be seen, and most importantly I am part of something bigger. This big world of seemingly strangers but we are all connected. We all want to be seen, to be acknowledged, and to be loved. When you see someone today, say their name. If you appreciate someone today tell them. You may be the only person they cross paths today that helps them to feel seen.

February has arrived. Along with it images of hearts, flowers, and red and pink all around us. These images and the holiday conjure up images and feelings of love. Take a moment and reflect on the word love. What kinds of thoughts does this word bring to your mind? Thoughts of a romantic partner perhaps? Maybe love for your child, or a pet? I encourage to explore the love you have for yourself.

As children we are all born with a deep unconditional love for ourselves. As we experience life and are exposed to other people’s actions and words and the images that are marketed to us over and over, sometimes our need to be loved by others overrides the deep love we all have for ourselves. Falling in love with yourself allows you to share that love with others. Love that is not clingy or controlling, but Love that is free of conditions and expectations.

“Something inside you emerges….an innate, indwelling peace, stillness, aliveness. It is the unconditioned, who you are in your essence. It is what you had been looking for in the love object. It is yourself.” – Eckhart Tolle

Looking outside of ourselves will never feel a void or emptiness. Only loving ourselves truly and unconditionally can do that. What exactly can a person do to fall in love with one’s Self? Below are some things to journal or meditate on to begin the process of healing and reclaiming that child-like Self Love.

Observe all of the things that make you you. Your passions, your dreams,

Be compassionate. Use positive words and thoughts when thinking or talking about yourself. Rather than criticizing, turn your thoughts into positive ones.

Realize that things you may view are not flaws, but rather opportunities to grow.

Use affirmations. Stuart Smiley was on the right track with this one. After hearing things over and over for a period of time we start to believe them. Affirmations are powerful tools and reminding yourself daily helps to re-circuit the way we think. Tell you self daily in your reflection in a mirror that you are an incredibly beautiful and talented person. Say I love you to your reflection and smile as you say it. Post reminders on your bathroom mirror or in your car as reminders.

Forgiveness. Forgive yourself for for mistakes you may have made in the past. Forgive others for any feelings of wrong doing. Holding grudges against yourself or other people take up energy that can be used to share positive energy.

Live in the Now. Don’t dwell in the past for you can’t change it. Do not spend so much time worrying about the what if’s. The future is not yet here and again, worrying about things that are not a reality will only take precious time and energy away from right now. (I highly recommend reading the bookThe Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment)

Acknowledge the effort you put in to everything you do.

Keep a gratitude journal. At the end of the day write down a couple of things you are grateful for. Even after a terrible day there is always something to be grateful for – maybe that you have electricity or a warm bed to come home to. Being grateful will attract more positive things into your life.

Trust in your talents abilities and gifts. You have the strength and skills to make changes for yourself that will result in a happier more loving you.

Let yourself feel your emotions and be honest to yourself about them. If you are sad acknowledge sadness. If you are happy acknowledge that happiness. Do not bury or hide from your emotions. Emotions are our guide to our thoughts.

Nurture your dreams. Allow yourself to have and work towards dreams and goals. Having dreams and goals give us a sense of worth and something to work towards and also ignite passion in our lives.

Practice yoga poses that open the heart chakra such as cobra or camel.