Escapism & Frustration…

It’s not very long ago when I found myself surrounded with a pinching question. A question so strong that it detached me from myself. A question so harsh that it made me ready to give up everything and all energies I ever possessed. The question which made my mind wander on the realms of a thought that ‘Why do we go for escapism often ‘despite’ knowing ALL aspects and being agreed to ones who say that escapism gives one NOTHING? Despite knowing every single aspect and being matured enough to realize realities, why we find ourself inclined towards escapism and then end up being frustrated?‘

I was told to believe in my conciousness cuz these frustrated random thoughts are supposed to originate from sub-conciousness. But what if we dominate conciousness by supressing subconciousness and still get nothing in return? What if doing so introduces fights within ourselves? We get engaged in inner fights. What if one realises the importance of failures in life and does believe in significance of failures in life but still can’t help being an escapist after meeting any failure?

They say… escapism is essential because its only so much one can take. And frustration is the natural response to the problems of life. But sometimes frustration is NOT the response to problems of life. It’s rather that one lacks strength in relation with himself at that time. But how to revive and boast up this strength? At times, we know all reasons and solutions but still get unable to figure out the LINK which connects reason and solution.

Everyone feels the desire to escape. No matter HOW good you have it, there are times when, instead of dealing with problems, you’d rather pretend they don’t exist. We turn to bad habits because they allow us to forget. They give us a pleasurable sensation that pushes problems out of mind.

I once read that man staggers through life yapped at by his reason, pulled and shoved by his appetites, whispered to by fears, beckoned by hopes. Small wonder that what he craves most is ‘self-forgetting‘. It’s my contention that “escapism gives one nothing” can easily be disputed by the story of Archimedes and his discovery of volume. He was perplexed when he was told to determine that a crown was pure gold or was alloyed with silver. His wife’s suggestion to “take a bath” was a form of recreation which is in turn a form of escapism. What is of great importance is the MEANS by which we escape: a long bath after a dilligent day may not be such a bad thing, for we are not machines and we are subject to fatigue; however, drowning our sorrows because turning and running from a monumental impasse does no good — we turn ourselves into cowards. The downfall of this solution is that it’s only temporary. The feeling wears off and the problems remain, often made worse by our indulgence. Once again faced with our problems, the natural reaction is to escape again, undergoing a cycle of escapism. We feel pain each time we face reality, so we use a bad habit to escape, which only increases our pain, making us more desperate to escape. Each time around it takes more sensation to escape, increasing our dependency on a bad habit. When you get caught in the whirlpool of escapism, it can feel impossible to get out UNTILL & UNLESS you revive strength within yourself and be strong to FACE things. Escaping iniquitously is a hinderance to allowing our inner beauty to blossom.

As for frustration… the reason it arises within us is a result of either one or both of these factors: (1)the world does not conform to us and/or (2) <an unexpected negative event occurs. To become infuriated at an individual for maintaining atheism is to reside in a delusional world where atheism doesn’t exist or where no one holds this view. Once a person accepts that bad things and different perspectives are imminent, he also better copes with his frustration and anger.

A point to be noted is that BOTH these points are concordant to one: Ignorance. People choose to escape rather than face their issues simply because they do not know better; the same logic is applicable the consolation of frustration. A friend of mine once said to me that ‘When we have “preferences messed up”… we fail… and we loose confidence.. and THAT is when we fight with us. ‘

“Problem knocks your life NOT to create another problem of tension…BUT for you to teach the ‘tact’ of solving any other future problem.”

PS: I have added ‘rating’ to my blog posts and comments today =) For those who wished to just like or dislike something, now can go for it.

As always, its a pleasure to read your blog! Its posts like these, which made me want to write too! Those feelings tucked away inside! They need to come out! And this is the perfect way!
And escaping is no option, because some thoughts are corrosive and can eat away at your mind! I always believe that keeping your emotions locked away is the worst thing you can do to yourself. When you talk about escaping, we aren’t actually leaving anything behind, its stuck to us, but we just cover it up with other stuff to avoid it from bothering us. But somewhere down the road its bound to come back and you never know how bad it might effect u then! So its best to deal with your problems and emotions as soon as you can if possible, and ask Allah for His help!

Your posts always make me think, and think hard. And I totally agree, it’s our weakness that makes us want to ‘escape’ and not face our problems. But we humans ARE weak creatures for the most part. And we learn from trial and error.

A very thoughtful post. I wanna say that when you stuck in issues and you dont find any solution then escape is the easiest way. Actually nobody wants to escape intentionally, it just happens therefore we are humans. No matter how strong we are and how strong we show we are but sometimes matters of heart show us what we really are from inside….. and then we realize that the strong, bold, tough person is very delicate from inside……..like many other normal souls.

As you friend said: “When we have “preferences messed up”… we fail… and we loose confidence.. and THAT is when we fight with us. ‘”
But I think sometimes we have to fail in order to know, we have to get hurt in order to grow……….and this is how life works.

That was quite a thought-provoking read. Having heard of its pleasures :P, I have always desired to opt for escapism at difficult times, but that never works for me (; Thus, I believe it’s more of a subconscious act. Inner weakness leads to it.
Loved the concluding quote. And yes, on a serious note, escapism is never the solution. (:
As far as taking a bath is concerned, it helps me to think clearly. So, I won’t consider it an act of escaping.

My little apprentice, why do you burden your mind with these thoughts? Let me make it simple for you by telling you that the escapism is basically a natural chemical response to any stressful situation. When the brain senses that things seem to be getting out of hand, it starts worrying and you feel stressed, and when that stage is reached, the brain decides to activate all stress-response signals in your body, one of them includes the fight-or-flight response. It most probably comes from our animal instincts for running away from a predator. But what if you could make yourself strong enough to face the predator and beat the masala out of him, hmm? There is always a solution to any problem in this universe, you just have to figure it out, and that is not impossible. So, it is always better to have died trying than to not have tried at all.

This is a very thought-provoking post. Some wise person once said “when you come to a fork in the road, take it.” I think one of the most stressful parts of decision making process is the “should have” that follows. It is completely wasted energy because we can never go back. I TRY to put things behind me once they are history. I like your ideas. Thanks for visiting my blog and for the comment.

I have enjoyed looking at your blog. Kahlil Gibran is one of my favorite authors. I like the Sufi quotation too. I relate to many of the quotations on your site and like its striking colors and look. Peace…Holly.

So many questions have started jumping inside me after reading this post. I can understand it and this post resonate so well with what happened in my life. I am more of escapist but in this escapism journey there comes a point, when you have to act and have to take some decision. But this escapism has helped me and I am always with a thought that if God is not giving you answers, it means your life is not yet ready to receive it.
Thanks so much for stopping-by and Glad that I am here!
~Blessings~Peace~

Your thoughts are very true, escapism is okay only to a limit. More often than not, we hide from what gives us pain, but a day will always come when we can hide no more, and then what? It is better to face our troubles than turn a blind eye to them.

To me the question is not WHY but WHERE to escape, for the former is hard to cope with courtesy it being an instinct engraved in the human psyche. Its always good to try and find an oasis in the scorching desert of life to rejuvenate one’s energies and continue the journey.

I adore reading you. You get int the meat of the mind and spirit. I do not post my writings such as these. They often get emailed in the middle of an email of me thinking and typing or writing to someone in a letter. I must first applaud you for baring your soul and for remembering to do just that. So important to keep accurate track of all change.

When one reaches a certain point in life, one becomes tired. Tired of so much thinking, tired of struggling, plain tired. In my experience, as well as having positive guiding people set by your side (as well as negative for those are often the hardest and most important learned lessons for those are often the ones that leave us most strong and courageous, the painful ones.)

When you reach a point through many means(people placed by us, being tired, losing energy, too much giving not enough receiving, etc, then that is when you notice for yourself that YOU need attention. You begin to pay closer attention to YOU and not so much external, more internal, inward to you, to God to the positive inside of you. That can be reached in so many ways as above, through another person, life change, mediation, etc. I know that negative thought pattern and that cycle we allow ourselves to run in like a hamster wheel. One day that will simply tire you. It should. You are more aware, acute and paying attention. You are more open to all the beauty around you, seeing and thinking less of the negative (even if there is negative it is no longer perceived as negative, everything is positive then.)

Its i not that anything has changed majorly, YOU changed your perspective, your way of thinking, how you react to negative situations and people and to your own self. Indulging in healthy things for ourselves is positive, the addictive harmful things are negative. We should be taking care of ourselves (mind, body, spirit, emotion, mental, physical) and are often taught it is wrong and selfish. That is not so. God doe snot wish us to be miserable, we make ourselves

miserable. Once you realize that simple fact and APPLY the positive then you one day see all negative as positive. Because in everything is a lesson, all lessons are positive and forward movement and growth of spirit. It isnt a bright light, it isnt a life altering anything, it is simply one day you begin thinking, feeling and seeing differently. Through all experience, comes change but one must be paying attention and wish it and want it. It is us not paying attention to our own selves that causes us to spiral.

That pattern will continue until we pay attention and change it. In all I have learned thus far, right now, today, I am different than a mere several hours ago. THAT is recognizing that each hour, each day is a gift. Fill it not with spiraling but with flying. Flying with direction but flying yet free and peaceful. Once you find that negative thought pattern, rid yourself of it or place that emotion and pit it someplace, THAT is when you cease spinning in a negative fashion. That is not ways to do either and a good cry is never a bad thing, nor is a shoulder, a bath, meditation, a hug and an ear.

To reach the point where you simply do not care what others think, that is when you have reached a great level of self esteem. By doing what causes you fear but doing it anyhow, well thats courage. I work on these things every day. We all do, on different levels, different stage sin our lives. You cause me to write. Thats inspiring and to think. I adore thinking but no more of the spiraling thinking, like this, your writing brings me positive thoughts and helps me to figure out if I am indeed in the right frame of thinking myself.

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"Read not to contradict and confute, nor to believe and take for granted, nor to find talk and discourse, but to weigh and consider."

"Yet it is in this loneliness that the deepest activities begin. It is here that you discover act without motion, labor that is profound repose, vision in obscurity, and, beyond all desire, a fulfillment whose limits extend to infinity." ~Thomas Merton

"Letting go has never been easy, but holding on can be as difficult, for strength is measured not by holding on, but by letting go."

"How from my garden I chanced to stray;
And how I was whirlwind trapped, I cannot say."
- Sir Muhammad Iqbal