Regrets

English is not my strongest language so bear with my poor use of English please ><

I believe that people have different stories of their own and this is my own life story. I am currently 16 years old , reaching 17 in about a month or so , yes , and I already have a son that's about 14 months old right now. It's nothing to be proud of as my parents nearly disowned me after finding out that I was pregnant.

Some may be envious of me having a child this early , it might mean that I might become a grandmother sooner than other people , but my life isn't just as simple as it seems like. After noticing that I had missed my period , I originally thought nothing of it but soon I got morning sickness. That was when I knew that something was amiss.

My tears nearly coursed their way down my cheeks as I asked my friend for help as I was underaged , could you imagine an underage girl buying pregnancy kits ? It had been confirmed that I was pregnant. I immediately sought help from my then boyfriend whom was utterly shocked by it as well. We had been having unprotected sex because he said that he was too lazy to get condoms (furthermore , he was underaged as well) and that I would not get pregnant if he pulled out in time which he did every time. None of us had expected that result.

Both of us sat in silence as we brood over the matter. He was keen on having an abortion while I was against it , it was a matter of life and death that we were talking about here but I was too afraid to face my parents and friends. Abortion was the only choice available to me. When we first had sex , he had told me that even if I got pregnant , he would settle down with me and raise the kid up with me even if he had to quit school and work to pay for the child's expenses. It was nothing more than a lie.

When he had finally convinced me of getting an abortion before my belly started to show , I heard some rumors about him. Apparently one of his 'brothers' (his close friend) had quarreled with him over me because apparently he had said something bad about me and his friend felt bad for me and tried to stand up for me.

That was when I started to get suspicious of him as I knew that his friend was not one that would lie. He was a honest and down-to-earth guy and I trusted him. I lied to my boyfriend saying that I had gone for the abortion when I actually hadn't. Then one afternoon when he was bathing , I checked his phone. He actually had another girl behind my back as my entire world collapsed in that instant and inside their messages were things about me. Saying that ' Don't worry babe , that dumb ***** went for an abortion already. '

I felt so cheated and angry , saddened at the same time as I immediately barged into his bathroom and slapped him. I stomped out of his house at once as he tried to pull me back but I got away from him as I rushed back home and cooped myself in my room , crying. My older brother , probably perturbed by my sobs , immediately confronted him as he nearly got a police case for assault.

I couldn't believe that I was being cheated by the man that I loved and cherished so much. Even more so when he called me a ***** behind my back. Just what did I mean to him ? Was I just a ***** toilet to him through our entire relationship ? Was I the only one that thought our love was real ?

That was when I spilled the beans of me being pregnant and that my brother was just standing up for me after seeing his beloved sister in tears. Ever since then , I haven't talked to him as news of me having a huge belly soon got to his ears. He tried to get me to forgive him as he had 'realized' his past mistakes but I was not going to fall for his two-faced ploy ever again.

Right now , I am still not sure whether giving birth to his child was the right thing to do but seeing my baby's smile everyday itself was enough satisfying for me as I am taking turns with my family to take care of him as I return back to school after skipping school for an entire year.

I want to dedicate this post to my beloved brother that stuck with me through thick and thin and even forsook his studies just to take care of me when I was moody and after I gave birth. Thank you.

P.S : my parents named the baby Zhen Yi (Righteous in chinese) in hopes that he would never be like his scumbag father.

I applaud you for being brave enough to not have an abortion. Your situation was not unlike my daughters. All parents want the best for their children so, we were not pleased at first. Once the initial shock was over, we decided just to press on and thank God for our blessing. People have sex but, God creates the person. Also, she did finish school.

You will in time move well beyond that jerk, and discover that your the truly brave one to have a child, and raise it. Being a Mother is the toughest job there is, no matter waht anyone else may say. Stay strong, and do whats best for your angel!

aw, sorry you been through lot. I can kind of understand though. w/ bf problem i mean. idk bout being mom yet, for im expecting now. but you seem like a good person im sure you will live to be good mother :)

I was a teen mom. I was a bit older than you. I got pregnant my senior year in highschool and had my daughter after I graduated. At first my parents were angry and said some pretty harsh things. Even encouraged me to get an abortion, but I knew I couldn't. I ended up marrying my boyfriend. But...it didn't last. He wasn't ready to be a father or a husband. Hang in there. Stay strong. Be the best mother you can for your baby. Get your education, go to college and make a good life for the two of you. That is what is most important right now. =)

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