Sit DOWN Scarjo

Scarlett Johansson covers the new Vanity Fair. I think she looks great. And she thinks she looks great too. Because, as she says, “I know my best angles”. We are referring, of course, to those nude shots that were stolen from her cell phone, an incident which she dismisses with some sass but not a lot of drama:

“They were sent to my husband. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s not like I was shooting a porno. Although there’s nothing wrong with that either.”

This is not the part of the interview that’s objectionable. Peter Siskind, who interviewed her for the magazine and who wrote one of my favourite books on celebrity Easy Riders, Raging Bulls: How the Sex Drugs and Rock’n’Roll Generation Saved Hollywood, describes Scarjo as “insouciant” and “saucy”. Another adjective that emerges from his profile however is narcissistic. Most actors are, naturally, but the way she’s able to illustrate hers out loud... it’s something quite special.

The conversation turns to Woody Allen and how often they’ve collaborated and how much they both enjoy it:

“Despite their compatibility, after working with Johansson on several films, Allen decided they should take a break: “I have every intention of working with her again, but I just didn’t think it was a great idea for either one of us to work together too intensely, picture after picture. I didn’t want her to be burdened by, ‘Oh, she’s in all the Woody Allen pictures, it’s so predictable,’ and she’s my new muse, and all that silliness.” Johansson does not share his opinion: “I don’t think anything’s played out. I’m waiting for him to write my Citizen Kane.”

Um... what?

You?

Citizen Kane?

David Fincher couldn’t cast you as Lisbeth Salander despite the fact that you threw down an amazing audition and now we’re talking about Citizen Kane???

Besides, Woody Allen’s also been working quite often these days with Penelope Cruz. Are you sure you’re still the first choice? As IF Scarlett Johansson thinks she’ll be able to claim her own Citizen Kane one day.

But there it is, right? That’s exactly why she was f-cking Sean Penn. Scarjo’s all about the arts and the crafts these days. She’s so consumed by it her marriage fell apart.

“Johansson says that her role in a revival of Arthur Miller’s A View from the Bridge in 2009 opposite Liev Schreiber “completely took me over in every way. I’d spent four months bleeding all over the stage, completely exposed. I felt I was forever changed by that experience. It was unbelievable holding that Tony.”

Johansson’s emotional and physical exhaustion after the end of the run was compounded by her subsequent divorce from Reynolds. “I didn’t really know what to do with myself. It was such a strange time. There was nothing that was interesting to me. I had a very public separation. It was difficult. I felt very uncomfortable.”

Scarjo won the Tony, yes. But her career stagnated at the same time, yes too. Her husband, while he’s had some recent stumbles, at the time, exactly a year ago, was experiencing a major career high. That’s the part they don’t talk about.

So now she’s figuring her sh-t out. And at 26, that makes sense. But I wonder if winning that Tony was what disturbed the sh-t in the first place. Did the Tony give her the want for a new plan? How does Citizen Kane fit into those plans? Well, it sounds like the plan is about the glory. Kinda like declaring how much she wants an Oscar.