Woman sitting in front of bar with friends: I approached motherhood like I approached my art…
–9th St & Ave C
Overheard by: Juliet
Street artist to tourist: I don't have empathy, I paint empathy.
–Soho
Hipster arty type to another: She deserves to be roofied; her prints are horrible.
–Pratt Institute
Hipster to another, at Georgia O'Keefe exhibit: That's a lot of vaginas.
–Whitney Museum
Four-year-old boy to father, at 17th century furniture room: This place gives me the creeps!
–Metropolitan Museum of Art
Overheard by: Me too
Mother to child: I seen that picture you did of that boy kissing that girl. (pause) Darren, your art shit is going far!
–Times Square

Guy #1: She was 14?! Guy #2: Well, I didn’t know she was 14 when I slept with her. Guy #1: Dude, how did you not know?! Guy #2: She didn’t look 14… Guy #1: And you didn’t ask her age? Guy #2: I did. She lied and said she was 21. Guy #1: And you didn’t ask for some identification? Guy #2: Yeah man, ’cause the way to get a girl into bed is to ask her for some ID first. Guy #1: Good point… Well, how old did you say you were? Guy #2: 21. Guy #1: 21?! Guy #2: Yeah, 21. Guy #1: Right, of course. Because 39 is clearly the new 21! Guy #2: Don’t judge me, man…
–52nd & Madison
Overheard by: So <i>not</i> 14!

Tall, hot hipster brunette: I mean, when I see girls flocking around him when he's DJing I just think “oh, they are DJ whores.” Little Asian friend: Uh-huh. Tall, hot hipster brunette: But this girl has never seen him DJ or anything. I don't get it. It's beyond my level of comprehension. Little Asian friend: It's okay, me too. Tall, hot hipster brunette: It's like he has a slut whistle and we cannot hear that frequency.
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: muffin

Drunken friend #1: That guy at the bar was hot. You totally should’ve taken him home. Drunken friend #2: Why me? Let her (points to drunken friend #3) take him home. Drunken friend #3 (trying to be discreet): Ummmm excuse me? I don’t need a man. I have d-i-c-k at home. Drunken friend #2: Uhh, the rest of the train can figure out what you just spelled.
–Crowded 6 Train
Overheard by: ear hustler