Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Let's play a game!

All right. So I wanted to take Daniel Petersen of the Office of National Drug Control Policy up on his offer to play games. I think sitting down with a deck of cards, a Scrabble board, maybe some Pictionary would be a good way to establish a friendly, diplomatic relationship (No strip poker). But he's a very busy man (I'm pleased to see that busy men read this blog), and something tells me he wouldn't take me seriously. He'd think it was a prank or something. My trusting idealist self would go into a corner and cry.

Plus, the ONDCP doesn't exactly have a history of taking things seriously. Some examples of things that the Office has brushed off as easily as they might dismiss a 19-year-old girl's offer to play Scrabble: The ineffectiveness of the National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign, the data resulting from interdiction and crop control efforts, results of medical research, et cetera et cetera, and, of course, FOIA requests.

So instead, let's provide some games for our faithful readers:
1. Go to Youtube. Search for "ondcpstaff." Laugh at the PSAs. Then search for "Office of National Drug Control Policy" or "ONDCP." You'll see the public's reaction to the anti-drug ads they posted.
2. Go to Google. Do an image search for "Office of National Drug Control Policy." Make up a scavenger hunt with the results. For example, find: Pinnochio, a bottle of Roundup weed killer, a podium that says "MeTh MaDnEsS", and Popeye the Sailor Man.
3. Actually, just go to the ONDCP website. Have someone read the content out loud. Everyone else in the room, yell "BULLSHIT!" as quickly and loudly as they can whenever it applies. Bonus points whenever somebody yells a hilarious synonym for "bullshit" such as "balderdash", "horsefeathers", or the endearingly English "Pish-posh." This would be a good drinking game, if you have the liver of a Norse god and you're of age. Otherwise, save yourself the alcohol poisoning and just yell. Actually. Maybe you shouldn't yell. Save your voice. Okay so it's a dumb game.
4. Do the action alert! Then, try these creative ways of passing it on:

Email and Myspace chain letters. Use the middle school approach: If you don't send this to x people, you'll never have your first kiss! The superstitious approach: An irate ghost will kill you in your sleep. Include a horror story. The sappy approach: This is just to say that I love you, and I found so many animated .gifs and photos of kittens to share with you, oh yes and this action alert.

Two words: Facebook. Wait, that's one word. How simple!

Spam your Livejournal/Deadjournal/xanga friends page.

Buddy list + copy and paste = link instantly sent to 50+ people.

Away message + link = link sent to you don't even want to know how many nosy and bored people.

Pass out mini-flyers or cards.

Getting your dad involved in the political process is a great Father's Day present!