NORTON'S WARDROBE ANTICS

GRAHAM NORTON may have been named GQ's worst-dressed man for two years running, but it won't get him down. "Isn't it just wrong?" the 39-year-old joker told CNN.COM. "I really think it's the gay thing. All of these supposedly heterosexual fashion editors at GQ and Esquire say Orlando Bloom or David Beckham is the best-dressed man. But what they're really saying is that they fancy them, because all they're wearing is jeans and a T-shirt. I don't think they hate me because I'm gay. I think they hate me because I'm not beautiful." Norton, who accepts his title with the same mischievous wit that has enabled him to surf porn sites with Joan Collins and persuade various celebrities to join him in ridiculous comic scenes on his Channel 4 show, refuses to take it too seriously. "I don't feel personally judged by GQ," he goes on. "They've only seen me in my bright shiny suits." Preparing to launch The Graham Norton Effect on the US channel Comedy Central tonight, Norton has said that Madonna is the woman he really wants on his sofa. "[She's] my big get," he said. "But in the end, the Madonna I want is the Madonna from six years ago. Now she's a working mother of two, everything's about Kabbalah. I'm not sensing fun with a capital F." (June 24 2004, AM)