This morning, I came late to the office, very late. Then I met my friend, whose age is much older than me, a married woman. She suddenly look at me and then said ‘you should really know your spouse’s character and personality before decided to marry him’.

Though I already know it long long time ago, I dont wanna let her down because it seems like she
needed someone to talk. So I said ‘mm, how long you’ve been together before decided to get marry?’ She answered ‘about 5 months, at that time I was 30 yo and in a rush to get married (well, here in Indonesia, women over 30 are considered as a spinster) so I said to him “if you seriously wanted to marry me, take your parents to meet mine and propose me” and that’s all, we’ve got married after that. I regrets for not appropriately knows him and now I’m trapped in this marriage.’ (FYI, a divorce is a taboo here, though the woman is financially independent).

That’s her story, ah, she have two sons.

Here’s what I have in mind. There’s no way I would and could marrying someone that I’ve just met in a few months, it’s just too risky. Getting to know each other’s character, personality, life, family, job, mind and views are important. I mean, I want an everlasting marriage, once in a life time. It has nothing to do with a fairytale kind of marriage where they’re live happily ever after without any storms or rocky roads along the way. No, not at all. I’m a realistic woman, I know there’s gonna be a lot of problems (and joys, of course) along the way, doesn’t it gonna be better if we really know our spouse? So there’s no unpredictable behaviour when it comes to solve the problems. It’s easier to compromise.

More info regarding marry:
Another way to find a husband/wife without dating and a long relationship, called ‘ta’aruf’. In Islam, you’re not allowed to date someone, ta’aruf is the only way to get married. This is more religious and going through a process and a specific pray. And ‘ikhlas’ play a big role in this process. You can browse about ta’aruf to know it better 🙂

Met a new friend here, Dolly (hey, she have a similar name with my buff). She’s working in the magazine office like forever, they called her to have today’s interview btw. ‘it’s quite similar, actually’ she said. The editor world, that is.

Here I am still thinking ‘how is that similar? Beauty and diseases? A surgery for life and a surgery for younger, better looks?

I’ll found out later.. Still waiting for the interview.. Wish me luck, everyone..

Hmmm, instead of talking about being fat or skinny, let’s talk about body mass index (BMI). The normal range of BMI is 18.5 to 25.

What? What are you saying? Oh, I’m sorry, you’re not familiar with BMI? Okay, BMI is a method used to estimate your total body fat. How to calculate it? Easy, divide your weight in kilograms by the square of your height in metres (kg/m2).

Above 25, you’re an obese.

Dear, I’m not talking about how ugly you would look like if you’re fat. I have more concern about your health, our health (since I am fat too, slightly above 25). Imagine those fist-size heart of ours, how hard it should work, twice triple from the average rate. Do you feels that gallons of sweat when we only walk for about 100 metres. Not to mention, the stairs. We frequently gasping. Our lungs is hardly catching oxygen to meet our body needs.

You know when the heart tissues are lack of oxygen supply and they’re continually working hard, the can stop working. And that means death.

Being too thin, BMI less than 18.5 is not good either. You got cold easily, because you have less fat supply. Callories deficiency, iron deficiency, blood glucose deficiency? That’s a problem.

Here in Indonesia, you can see lots of comments that mocking president or his former opponent. People is divided into two parties, jokowers and prabowoers (?).

This war continues even after the election finished. It varies from a true to the most unexpected kind of rumors. And I’m sick of it.

That’s why I decided not to go with the flow; I don’t want my facebook account get infected by those politic virus. So I never posts anything about politic. And my rule is no more of that kinda stuff, that applied for everyone who’s come to my page.

Today, finally, there’s someone who mentioned the political party on her comment to my post. I tell her about my rule and I have to deletes her comment. She said that she doesn’t meant to do so (yeah, right..) and kinda accused me that I’m a supporter for her opponent party. That’s funny because I have just told her that I don’t support any party.

Such a sly. I thought I know her all this time.. Whatever.. My page, my rules.. If you can’t obey it, then don’t do anything on my page..

Generally, the world or the human that live today would differentiate themselves as woman and man (the primary classification, please do not offended by that). And everyone is teaching their children how to behave following their gender.

Today, when I have a chitchat with a friend (male), I said that I’m about to cry because I remember something in the past while listening to ‘end of may’ by Michael Buble (my fave song recently) and pms. Then he said ‘you’re a girl, you have a privilege to cry. Do so.’ I get shocked by his words, we all have this tear-producing part in our eyes. It means anyone can cry as they please. Man can cry, I don’t mind if one day a man cry in front of me, that’s normal.

Man have rights to cry, as much as we women do. Don’t be shy or feel ashamed by expressing your feelings.