Surviving the apocalypse on a budget

If you’re preparing for the end of the world that’s predicted in the Mayan calendar, or a zombie uprising, you probably should start stocking your bunker now.

That said, there’s a lot of funny stories that have been popping up everywhere about how to protect yourself from zombies, and the alleged Mayan apocalypse that’s due on December 21, like how to prepare yourself on a budget.

Foxnews just ran a story called “$441 in Survival Gear Will Get You Through the Mayan Apocalypse,” and considering we’ve reached financial apocalypse with the economy, why not cut some corners when stocking up for the alleged end of the world?

Of course, if the world does come to an end, there are a lot of areas of our lives where we’ll have to cut corners anyways, so here’s what Foxnews suggests…

You can get a Kikkerland Survival Tool that has a whistle, LED light to guide you in the dark, a compass, flint to start fires, a thermometer, and more. All this for just $18.

Then you can snap up an Eton BoostTubrine2000 power generator for $60. Verilux makes a solar rechargeable flashlight for $30, and to cook food you can scope out a BioLite Camp Stove for $130, and a military-grade Gerber LMF II Knife for $108.

You can also purchase a Pandemic Quick Kit for $10, and an emergency fire started kit made by Zippo for $25. What’s also cool about this budget list is it’s much cheaper to stock up for the Mayan apocalypse than a zombie uprising, which costs a hell of a lot more.

Indeed, we ran a story some time ago about a zombie preparedness checklist on Amazon, where a crossbow package alone can cost you $424.67. Adding up all the tools you’d need to protect yourself against the undead can really add up. We added all 27 items on the list, and they totaled $1,793.75 before shipping and handling!

So if you can’t afford to stock up against zombies, or even have an extra $441 to protect yourself from the Mayan apocalypse, don’t despair.

Neither of these catastrophic events is going to happen, and we’ve definitely gone out of our way to debunk both of them so there won’t be any panic. Relax, take a deep breath, and don’t cancel your new year’s plans, they won’t be ruined by zombies or the prophecies of the Mayans.