So some scientists believe that the BP oil spill may be creating a buildup of methane capable of exploding and causing a mass extinction not unlike the Late Paleocene Thermal Maximum that went down 55 million years ago and (arguably) the Permian extinction event from 251 million years ago. Gotdammit, BP.

Scientists now worry that much more than oil is leaking out at dangerous levels, including a massive amount of methane, and the BP-imposed blackout that is keeping scientists and reporters away from the leak is only escalating fears.

Texas A&M University's Dr. John Kessler, an oil industry expert, theorizes that the leak at the ruptured well could be 40%, and with the volume that's going into the water, that's a lot of methane. As if that wasn't bad enough, a huge gash has been discovered not 10 miles from the BP leak, which itself could be adding more oil and methane to the mix.

So, what happens? Well, if the methane concentration in the Gulf -- which Kessler and his team have said is "one million times the normal level" -- erupts, it could create tsunamis, dead zone areas devoid of oxygen, poisonous rainfall and even collapse the sea floor.

Wonderful -- first the seabirds & turtles and now us. What did we ever do to deserve this? And by we I mean you all, because I'm a f***ing angel. Isn't that right, God? (Don't forget to beam me up before the explosion)