Onward and Upward! How to live an uncommon life.

The Secret Powers of Time: Save our Families

Would you say that you spend more time focusing on the past, the present or the future? Your tendencies in this regard provide a framework through which you interact with your world.

Professor Philip Zimbardo (http://www.zimbardo.com) of Stanford University offers a thought-provoking analysis of what he calls “The Secret Powers of Time.” He argues that our individual perspectives on time have significant impact on our work, our study and our well-being. Enjoy his presentation, delivered in an interesting new medium called RSA Animate (www.theRSA.org).

The facts I found most disturbing in Professor Zimbardo’s talk relate to the erosion of family life in America. I remember growing up with daily family dinners at 5:30pm. These dinners worked like clockwork and provided, in retrospect, a point of centering amidst the varied activities of the day. If we get to the point where we are too busy for family as a nation, I fear we’ll miss a central point of living. Granted there are some families that are better off being fragmented and disjointed, but the large majority of families in our country are better off emphasizing the cohesive qualitites that make families great and our nation strong.

I heard a quote today that I don’t recall specifically, but it went something like this: “Just because you’re very busy doesn’t mean you are making progress.” It fascinates me to no end to observe large cultural and societal shifts working out in real-time. Ingenious inventions, like the steam engine or wireless communication, profoundly alter the fabric of society: the way we work, the way we play and the way we live.

There was an interesting article in the New York Times the day before yesterday called “Hooked on Gadgets, and Paying a Mental Price” (http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/07/technology/07brain.html?bl) that noted recent studies on the inverse correlation of the pervasiveness of technology and attention span. The more gadgets and the more digitally oriented people are, the less they are able to focus and hold attention on their immediate environment (work, family, etc.).

So, the world is becoming more “ADD” as time marches on, families are increasingly difficult to hold together based on habits and preferences of our new era and few seem to question or even notice this trend. This sounds like a good movie plot. The question remains, however, will it end up in the Horror, Drama or Comedy section once it hits the shelves?

3 Responses

I remember the days of regular family dinners and how valuable that time was in our household. It was a time of calm amidst the chaos of the day when we sat together, gave thanks and then shared our day with each other. I try to create that for my children but find it to be increasingly difficult. I have even caught my children texting each other when they were just in another room, communication skills are defaulting to short sentences and slang. The video was so amazing to watch as it put together for us the changes that are occuring in a way that we could take a practical look. I think it is important to understand these things so we can accomodate this in our own actions and thought processes and find ways to create togetherness and a solid education in a new social environment. Thanks for sharing.

Someone told me about a study that analyzed students that were accepted into Harvard. The most prevalent commonality they could identify was they had family dinners almost every night.
I remember family dinners as a child and what I recollect is that you engaged with your parents and your siblings; but your parents guided the conversation topic and of course commented liberally.
I don’t know if this really makes the difference but if I were raising children I would try to put the odds in my favor.
I do remember this, I enjoyed that time with my parents.
Great blog. I read it all the time.

I suppose that regular family dinners give visible evidence of the reverence that parents have for family, just as a healthy looking body gives evidence of a consistently held conviction that healthy choices make a difference. I appreciate your comment!