Chat with Bill Simmons

On Wednesday, Page 2's Bill Simmons attempted a marathon chat for the ages, and he succeeded. He moved into the SportsNation record books when he set the individual chat record at 7 hours, 4 minutes. He broke the previous record, which was held by ESPN.com MLB Insider Rob Neyer.

Neyer's record was as unexpected as a Clay Buchholz no-hitter as his normal 60-minute chat back in March kept going and going and going, ultimately lasting six hours and 37 minutes. The current record for longest chat featuring multiple chatters is the recent 25 hours of college football in which various ESPN college football analysts and writers teamed up for a marathon chat leading up to kickoff of the 2007 season.

The Simmons marathon chat was the kick off for Jimmy V Week at ESPN. All the ESPN platforms will all have programming and messaging geared toward raising awareness and funding for cancer research and the V Foundation.

Bill Simmons

(12:01 PM)

It's noon ET and I just polished off a 20-ounce coffee. Let's make history!

Bill Simmons

(12:02 PM)

One important note: We're doing this marathon chat to raise awareness for the Jimmy V Foundation. If you want to donate, click on this link - https://www.jimmyv.org/donate/donations/ - or call 1-800-4JIMMYV.

Craig, London, Ontario

How worried were you during the Pats game Sunday night, on a scale of 1 to 10.

Bill Simmons

(12:03 PM)

I was worried almost immediately, when it became apparent that A.J. Feeley was throwing darts. Any time A.J. Feeley is in the zone, you know it might not be your night.

Bill Simmons

(12:04 PM)

But I didn't get super-worried until they showed the clip of Feeley leading the comeback in Miami against them in 2004 - one of the most famous gambling moments of the decade, when the Pats-Indy-Pittsburgh 3-team tease that had been winning for like 7 straight weeks went down in flames on a Monday night in about 3 minutes.

Unreadable Questions

The chat questions are in black font and unreadable on the background, please make a change

Bill Simmons

(12:06 PM)

Uh-oh... just found out that you guys can't see the questions when I post them. That's a problem.

Bill Simmons

(12:06 PM)

The first question I answered was this: Craig, London, Ontario: How worried were you during the Pats game Sunday night, on a scale of 1 to 10.

Bill Simmons

(12:07 PM)

I am NOT letting this derail the record

Rob Neyer

I rigged the background, you'll never touch my record. Expect more hiccups if you continue to try.

Bill Simmons

(12:07 PM)

Rob Neyer I rigged the background, you'll never touch my record. Expect more hiccups if you continue to try.

Bill Simmons

(12:08 PM)

I'm going to post the questions in my answers, then answer them.

Bill Simmons

(12:09 PM)

Mike from Cleveland asks: "Dont know if you've seen Mr.Brooks, but Dane Cook is in it and when he dies I couldnt help but yell out THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO HAVE YOUR THROAT SLASHED to mock his playoff baseball commercials."

Bill Simmons

(12:10 PM)

Glad you brought this up. I hate to give away a key plot point in an Oscar winner like Mr. Brooks, but here we go... if you don't like Dane Cook, definitely rent this movie if you ever wanted to see something horrible happen to him.

Bill Simmons

(12:10 PM)

By the way, it's one of the 15-20 worst movies ever. It's completely inexplicable.

Bill Simmons

(12:11 PM)

Steve asks, "Seriously - wow. I mean come on...no one at the worldwide leader thought it would be a good idea to see if the font color clashed with the ridiculous background?"

Bill Simmons

(12:11 PM)

Steve, I wish I had a good answer for you.

Kyle (Columbia, MD)

Bill, you never talked about the Dane Cook "There's only one October" skits they did on SNL a few months back. THAT WAS YOUR IDEA!!! Did Seth Meyers bring it up at pitch? Are you going to get royalties? I need to know these things.

Bill Simmons

(12:12 PM)

Kyle from Columbia asks, "Bill, you never talked about the Dane Cook "There's only one October" skits they did on SNL a few months back. THAT WAS YOUR IDEA!!! Did Seth Meyers bring it up at pitch? Are you going to get royalties? I need to know these things."

Bill Simmons

(12:14 PM)

Here's what happened: When they had the writer's meeting that week, two of the SNL writers (independently of me) wrote a parody of the commercials separately of the "pitch" I made on the Seth podcast, and I think what ended up on TV was closer to their idea than mine. But I was honored nontheless. It's on You Tube if you haven't seen it.

Bill Simmons

(12:14 PM)

Looks like the font is fixed - now, it's just semi-impossible to read the questions, but you can actually kinda see them. So I think this is progress.

James (Murfreesboro, TN)

Do the Suns have a serious shot at winning the NBA title as they are constructed, or do you think they need to add something? How good would Mike Miller or Anderson Varejao look on that team?

Bill Simmons

(12:17 PM)

I think the Suns need to make a deal - they're too soft and they can't get stops. G-State ran all over them the other night; it was like a layup line. I am patiently waiting for them to put Amare into play because that's the real problem here - they have enough offense as it is, and he's a terrible defensive player. I would love to see them trade him to Detroit for Rasheed Wallace and Jason Maxiell, I think that trade makes them tougher and better defensively. Rasheed can guard Duncan one-on-one and Amare can't - and they're not getting to the Finals without beating SA.

Scott (Chicago, IL)

You should have started the chat at 9:00 am, because you would have, easily, broken the record, seeing how everyone who is in this chat is at work, and would be on it til 5:00 with you. What are you going to do at 5:00 when everyone leaves work? I love you, but I don't love you enough to stay late at work just to chat about inane things going on in the world!

Bill Simmons

(12:18 PM)

We thought about this, but 9:00 am equals 6:00am West Coast time, and I am incoherent when it's that early.

Ryan (sheboygan, WI)

How about "Chairman Yi"? They won't stop comparing him to Dirk around here.

Bill Simmons

(12:19 PM)

It's amazing. He's legitimately good. The fan base that should be furious is Seattle - they could have taken him at 5 and they were always the most logical team for him with their big Asian population, but it seems clear that the owners DIDN'T want him because it would have been tougher for them to move the team.

Bill Simmons

(12:19 PM)

Do you think the Bucks would trade Yi for Jeff Green in a million years? And Jeff Green is good.

TC, Lancaster CA

The greatest video game athlete ever is on the front page of ESPN.Com! how can you be doing a marathon chat while this is up?

Bill Simmons

(12:20 PM)

And it's a terrific piece, too. Which reminds me, by Michael Weinreb's book about chess to read over the holidays, it's a really good read.

Danny Salamander (Orlando, FL)

For the record, I love you enough to stay late at work chatting about the inane things in the world. Good thing I'm not at work. You had negative things to say about the Rashard Lewis to the Magic signing this summer-- as did I-- What's your SG crystal ball telling you about how long it will be before the Magic gravy train is derailed? Or have you changed your tune on Rashard and the Magic? Good luck with the gauntlet today SG, I'll be with you every step.

Bill Simmons

(12:21 PM)

Yes, I changed my tune about their over-under within 2 weeks. They're really good. Still doesn't excuse the fact that they overpaid Lewis by $50 million and had to renounce Darko's rights to get him.

Tim (Towson)

So...LeBron's going to end up being a top-10 all-timer, right?

Bill Simmons

(12:22 PM)

Barring injury, yes. He's been absolutely outstanding this year - playing with MJ-like intensity on both ends and he never takes even a quarter off. He's the unanimous MVP so far.

Wes ( Newton, MA)

Is there anyway not to include Jacoby in the package for Santana? Is the Redsox involvement in this bidding war just to up the ante for the Yankees?

Bill Simmons

(12:23 PM)

I don't think the Sox can include Jacoby in the deal because it would cause a riot with the female fan base in Boston - girls would be burning pink hats in protest, it would be horrible. Every girl between 15 and 25 in the Boston area is convinced that they will be Mrs. Jacoby Ellsbury some day, you can't just cruelly take that dream away from them to get a No. 1 starter.

Robert (Morrisville, PA)

Bill, has anyone ever come up with an explanation for how in the WWE a wrestler can make a surprise appearance (like a Steve Austin) against the CEO Vince McMahon, but the music booth automatically has their theme music queued. Is this downtrodden employees sticking it to their boss? Is it an automatic system that recognizes wrestlers DNA? Or (my opinion) the music booth is run by God?

Bill Simmons

(12:25 PM)

The explanation is that the guy who runs the music booth is more talented at his job than anyone else in America - he can see into the future by 3 seconds, and he can call up 200 different theme songs within 2 seconds.

Austin (Chicago, IL)

What the state of your fantasy team? Haven't heard much since the untimely defeat. I knocked off an 11-0 team this week. Let me tell you, it is almost as good as winning it all.

Bill Simmons

(12:27 PM)

I am 9-2 and lost both games by a combined 4 points. You need an insane amount of luck to go undefeated. You really do. In my case, I lost one week because Jay Cutler bounced a game-winning TD pass to BrandoN Marshall, and I lost the other week because LDT and Vernon Davis couldn't get 17 points between them. So there you go.

Otis (Toronto, ON)

This is dedication: 1. Start your chat at the office while closing door to office and declaring a "brainstorming session" 2. Continue on the commmute home via blackberry 3. Continue chat on the home computer, taking breaks for smokes and steaks that being said, how close are we to having the Knicks banished to the WNBA?

Bill Simmons

(12:29 PM)

That a boy, Otis! I like the idea of banishing the Knicks to the WNBA - Renaldo Balkman would be the 10th most attractive player in the league.

Alex (NYC)

In regards to the potential Johan trade, what are your thoughts for each team involved? I mean, obviously, getting a #1 of that quality would make a huge difference, but given what the twins are asking, are there teams that cannot afford to make the trade without legitimately sacrificing their future?

Bill Simmons

(12:30 PM)

I discussed this with JackO in the podcast that's going up today (we did 2 this week) - in my opinion, the Yanks will get Johan because Hank Steinbrenner wants to make a big splash and doesn't want to look like he's off to a weak start, so I think he'll overpay.

Bill Simmons

(12:31 PM)

In this case, I actually think they SHOULD overpay because Johan is the best pitcher in baseball. But eventually, Hank will ruin the Yanks. And their fans know it. He's like James Dolan 2.0.

Kevin (Seattle)

Bill- I'm a coach at the AAU level here in Seattle, and I've somehow forced myself to watch the Sonics this year, out of curiosity about two things: 1. The Durant kid. Obviously. 2. The way Carlesimo coaches. I hadn't seen the guy do anything in maybe ten years, but I remember back in the day thinking that this guy PJ was an excellent basketball brain but was not much of a motivator: call it assistant coaches' disease. Then I turn on the Kings game and there's PJ PLEADING with Durant to do something and Durant looking away half-interested, etc. etc. So I guess my point is: Was this Carlesimo hiring (as opposed to say Rick Carlisle or Dwayne Casey or someone) a rollover on the organization's part? Is this just one more example fo Clay Bennett trying to make us fans WANT the Sonics gone? I don't know what to think about this team anymore, except that if they leave, if the fans and politicians let them leave, then the love affair between me and this wonderful progressive city os O V E R.

Bill Simmons

(12:35 PM)

That's an interesting theory. PJ failed at G-State and he failed in Portland, so that helps the theory, but I do think the guy who hired him (Sam Presti) thought he was getting someone who had learned from one of the best (Popovich for the past 5 years). With that said, the way PJ has coached the Sonics has been inexcusable. I don't get what they're doing with Durant at all. I mentioned this on Dave Dameshek's show yesterday, but the Durant thing bums me out - I feel like my kid went to college and I had such high hopes for him, and then I went to visit and he's hanging out with a bunch of losers and his room reeks of pot or something.

Bill Simmons

(12:36 PM)

I still love Durant, but it looks like he's stuck at the wrong college with the wrong major and the wrong friends right now. Play him at the "4," keep him near the basket on defense and let him do his thing, for God's sake.

Rondo (Boston)

Do you know who pays for the new backboards in Cleveland? KG is making me write a check to pay for the backboard I cracked with that jumpshot in OT last night. Also, do you know a good safehouse? KG frightens me.

Bill Simmons

(12:38 PM)

Rajon, I'm glad you're reading the chat. Please don't shoot 20-footers in the last few minutes of a close game under any circumstances. We're begging you.

Justin (Peabody, MA)

It seems to me the refs are looking for Offensive P.I. against Randy Moss now. Anything close, they call it. I have this bad feeling they will make an awful call against him in the playoffs and it could cost us.

Bill Simmons

(12:40 PM)

I will only say this - Moss isn't allowed to raise his hands in the end zone, but opposing d-backs are allowed to maul him on every play. In the Miami game, he caught 2 TD's with guys pulling his arms down - no flag. It's like he's being officiated the same way NBA refs officiated Shaq back in the day, where there's a degree of difficulty brought into it for him.

Ernest (Richmond, VA)

If you were a PR guy trying to market Rondo how would you do it? Rajon Rondo: at least he's not Smush Parker

Bill Simmons

(12:41 PM)

Rondo does a ton of good things and they can't win in May and June without him turning into a good PG. So I don't mind giving away a couple of games while he gets his feet wet. They don't have any other options. Eddie House can't play D, so if his shot is off, he's completely useless.

Bill Simmons

(12:42 PM)

They desperately need one more PG, but it can't happen until February when guys start getting bought out (Sam Cassell, Ty Lue, Anthony Johnson, Damon Stoudamire, whomever). Although I think they are making a major mistake not signing Mike Wilks, who could play for them. He keeps bouncing around and he's actually a decent PG.

Mike (Philly, PA)

Bill, is McNabb done in Philly after Feeley's game on Sunday and Garcia's play last year?

Bill Simmons

(12:44 PM)

The two best chances at the Ewing Theory right now are McNabb and Kobe.

PV (Blacksburg, VA)

How do you feel about the type of coverage given to Sean Taylor yesterday? I know a lot of people were saying it was unfair and unbalanced due to some of the conclusions that were being reached.

Bill Simmons

(12:46 PM)

From what I watched, I thought the coverage was extremely balanced. It reminded me of the Josh Hancock coverage in that there was an "elephant in the room" that everyone seemed to be avoiding - in this case, someone broke into Taylor's house the previous week and left a kitchen knife on his bed, and the police are trying to figure out if the two break-ins were related? Whaaaaaaaaat????

Bill Simmons

(12:48 PM)

I mean, just think about this logically. If one of your buddies had someone break into his house when he wasn't there, and the intruder left a knife on his bed, and then a week later, your buddy was shot and killed in his house, would you think those 2 events were related? Come on. I feel terrible for Taylor and his family, and there was nothing good about this story, but for everyone to pretend that somebody out there did NOT want Taylor dead... I just think it's naive.

Maurice (Houston, Texas)

How do you feel about one of the biggest games of this nfl season being on NFL Network where only a small percentage of us can watch?

Bill Simmons

(12:50 PM)

Sal and I talked about this on today's podcast - we need to stop complaining and just accept this for what it is. Go to a bar or go to a friend's house to watch the game. This isn't getting resolved.

Chris (Jersey City, NJ)

Fair on balanced? What? While it may turn out that Sean Taylor was killed IN HIS HOME because of something that he had previously done wrong, it is a lot bit unfair that every story is referencing his past mistakes. If a regular non-famous person was killed during a break-in (the most obvious scenario) would the stories talk about that time in college when I got into a bar-fight or when I was lied to my boss about being sick so I could go away for a long weekend? No and no. Yet every single news outlet wants to link his being fined for the occassional late hit and his murder. That is not balanced at all.

Bill Simmons

(12:53 PM)

I only watched the SportsCenter coverage and read what was in the newspapers - to me, it seemed like the crucial part of the story was that someone had broke into his house a week before and blatantly threatened his life by putting a kitchen knife on his bed. And that was kinda glossed over. We even had the police sergeant/chief (can't remember his title) telling us that they were investigating IF the two events were related. That's insane.

David (Columbus, OH)

Am I alright to get excited about the Browns? Our two biggest areas of concern are the defense and inability to run the ball but both were excellent this weekend against a decent Texans team.

Bill Simmons

(12:55 PM)

Absolutely. You can absolutely get excited. They can score points on anyone and they're always in any game, even if they're trailing by 10 in the 4th, because of their passing game. I love what's happening with the Browns - they've been lost in the shuffle because of all the attention the top-5 teams are getting. But would you want to play them if you were a 3 or 4 seed in Rd. One? I wouldn't.

Kevin Durrant (Seatle)

Eff Justin (Peabody, MA)!! THE REFS HANDED YOU THE GAME!! ADMIT IT!! I'M GOING TO KEEP POSTING THIS UNTIL YOU DO! Seriously, the generous spots, the non-challenge on the TD at the half, the Brady head bobs and hand jukes that went uncalled, the "lined up in the neutral zone" call on 4th down that could have gone either way.... COME ON!!!

Bill Simmons

(12:56 PM)

I actually thought the refs were terrible for both sides in this one. And the TD at the end of the first half was a TD... do you think it wasn't? Also, manning does those head bobs and head jukes all the time.

Bill Simmons

(12:57 PM)

(I am such a homer.)

Pat (Granville, OH)

How badly are you going to break the chat record? Is it going to be like Chamberlain's 100 point game where there is no way the record will ever be broken?

Bill Simmons

(12:58 PM)

It's a tough one because anyone could break the record just by typing answers for 8 straight hours. i think the larger goal is to keep people's interest for as long as you can. That's why I'll be shedding a piece of my clothing every hour. By hour eight, I'll be completely naked. Top that, Rob Neyer!

Chris (DC)

Thoughts on this season of Curb ?

Bill Simmons

(1:01 PM)

Thought it was up and down (mostly up) and then everything was redeemed with the last 5 minutes of the season finale, which was the single funniest ending to a show other than the season finale when everyone was swearing iun the restaurant and Suzy said to Cheryl, "(Bleep) you you car wash (bleep)!" which was my favorite Curb moment ever other than dinner at Gil Bang's house and the entire Crazy Eyez Killah episode.

Bill Simmons

(1:02 PM)

I also thought it was a genius move to break up Larry's marriage - injected the show with some life and it was fun to figure out how much he was incorporating from his own life. Also explained why his wife seemed disappointed when he came out of his coma at the end of the previous season.

Bill Simmons

(1:03 PM)

The one thing I don't like about the show is that Larry doesn't work anymore - some of the best stuff from the first 2-3 seasons came from him trying to sell pilot ideas and dealing with crazy Hollywood execs and stuff. Would love to see them get back to that a little.

Jim, Nashua, NH

Bil - when you finish and crush Neyer's record, are you going to hold up a handmade sign for the camera saying how long you chatted? It will be reminiscent of Wilt and his sign that said 100, when he had that big game in Hershey PA.

Bill Simmons

(1:03 PM)

An excellent idea!

Ryan (New York, New York)

What does Colvin's injury mean for the Pats D, you think we might see another Troy Brown spotting in the defensive unit, or maybe they'll just put Gotskowski there because he doesn't kick anyway so you might as well make him earn his paycheck, no?

Bill Simmons

(1:04 PM)

That was a random stomach punch last night - had no idea that was coming. Now Seau and Bruschi have to play every down. Yikes. Although it's nice to have Troy Brown back... you know he'll make 1 huge play in the next 3 months, you just know it.

Tom Heinsohn (Boston)

I gotta give you a Tommy Point for this marathon chat! I LOVE THE SPORTS GUY!!

Bill Simmons

(1:05 PM)

Bing... bang... BOOM!

duke (chitown)

What about trading Ben Wallace and maybe a draft pick or three for Amare? Would solve problems for both teams, right? Amare would get to be the top dog in Chicago and give them the scoring they need and Ben would obviously upgrade the Suns front court defense. It's a perfect match. Plus Paxson and Kerr must be on the same page to work this out - they're basically the same person, right? Jordan's white, go-to spot up shooter. Gotta count for something.

Bill Simmons

(1:06 PM)

I wouldn't touch Wallace - he has one of the top-10 worst contracts in the league, the Suns would never go near him.

Bill Simmons

(1:08 PM)

Only two Amare trades make sense for them. 1. Amare for Rasheed and Maxiell. 2. Amare and Banks for Camby, Najera and a first round pick.

Colin Farrell (Miami)

Bill...I'm very disappointed...I thought...MY SONNY CROCKETT...would EARN YOUR RESPECT...meanwhile...Michael Mann may not ask me to be in another one of his films...

Bill Simmons

(1:09 PM)

You know what, Colin? The Miami Vice movie is holding up surprisingly well on cable. You can jump in at any time and it's not terrible - plus, it's fun to make fun of your acting. As a rewatchable cable movie, I give Miami Vice an 8 out of 10. Of course, The Departed is a 10 out of 10.

peter (chicago, IL)

bill, what is your take on the kobe-lakers saga? who's side on you on? I don't believe you've ever addressed this.

Bill Simmons

(1:12 PM)

I agree with Kobe in that the team is wasting his prime by pseudo-rebuilding with young players (Bynum, Farmar, Crittendon, Kwame, etc.), but at the same time, he wanted his own team and he never should have allowed them to give away Butler for Kwame, which was one of the five worst moves of this decade. From what I hear, Kobe has been allowed to okay EVERY major Laker move starting with the Shaq trade and they run everything by him. If he wanted to block Kwame-Butler, he could have. But he didn't. So it's his own fault.

Bill Simmons

(1:12 PM)

I don't understand why Houston and LA can't just trade T-Mac for Kobe. What's the holdup? Make the trade already.

Chris (Boston)

How about Amare and Banks for Chandler and Bobby Jackson? Gives the Suns a great defensive big man, who is still young, with a decent contract, plus a good veteran PG to backup Nash and allow Barbosa to slide over to the 2. And it gives Chris Paul a legit finisher.

Bill Simmons

(1:14 PM)

It's a very logical trade on paper (although NO should have to throw in Julian Wright as well), but Kerr and Sarver would get killed in Phoenix for that one by the casual fans who don't understand the league and think Amare is a top-5 guy because he scores so much. At least if they traded for Rasheed Wallace, you could sell that one because he's such a smart player and has been such a winner over the years.

Mike: Atlanta GA

So considering the Patriots are going to get a top 5 pick next year, who would you like to see the Pats go after with that pick? Any college players catch your eye this year?

Bill Simmons

(1:16 PM)

They need either a LB or a CB to replace Samuel if they're not going to re-sign him. I can't imagine that they would stay in a top-5 spot because of the salary scale - it's a lock that they'd trade down. My worst-case scenario is them getting the No. 2 pick and the guy wearing a cream-white suit as he shakes hands with Goodall, I think I would have a nervous breakdown.

John (WI)

How great was the last fight in the Contender? Two guys just slugging it out and landing some vicious hits and they kept coming. Do you think either has a decent career ahead?

Bill Simmons

(1:17 PM)

AMAZING! Even more amazing - the senile referee who seemed determined to honor the 25th anniversary of the Kim-Mancini fight by not stopping it 20 punches earlier. That was the single worst job by a boxing ref this decade.

Bill Simmons

(1:17 PM)

AMAZING! Even more amazing - the senile referee who seemed determined to honor the 25th anniversary of the Kim-Mancini fight by not stopping it 20 punches earlier. That was the single worst job by a boxing ref this decade.

Isiah (NYC)

Have you seen my dignity?

sammy (Florida)

whatever happened to the steroid investigations that were going to happen after the world series and the players that were supposed to be 'outted'?

Bill Simmons

(1:19 PM)

That's a fantastic question. I think they're waiting to release that info on the busiest sports day possible - like a day where the Yanks trade for Santana, Isiah gets fired and Belichick is found to have been breaking into the offices of other coaches and installing wire taps.

Ricky Williams (Miami, Fl)

Is it possible to get medicinal marijuana for torn pectorials?

Emmitt Smith

Would you agree that the NFC West is one of the worst conferences in the NFC? You're gonna smash the chat record. Don't quit, don't even quit.

Bill Simmons

(1:20 PM)

I think the NFC West is going through a rice of passage right now, so you can't make it an escape goat.

Wes (Cleveland, Ohio)

This marathon chat comes at a perfect time--I really got after it at the Cavs-Celts game last night and don't want to do anything at work. What do you think of the budding rivalry between LeBron and Paul Pierce? I heard that awful "play" Mike Brown "drew up" at the end of regulation was solely to allow LeBron a chance to stick the game-winner in Pierce's face.

Bill Simmons

(1:21 PM)

Glad you brought up the horrible ISO play for LeBron to end the game - it's becoming an epidemic, everyone in the NBA has the Hero Complex at the end of these games and wants to re-enact the Russell-MJ shot. It seems like 1 out of 10 actually go in. The bigger question - why do you have to call a timeout to set that play up??????????

Bill Simmons

(1:23 PM)

The good news is that the Celtics have finally weeded Pierce off that play - our new end-of-the-game play is for everyone to dribble around haphazardly and eventually settle for a panicked, off-balance jumper, but at least guys are moving around and not standing still.

Richard: Columbia, MD

Bill, please tell me that I'm not crazy for hoping the Bullets (I refuse to call them the Wizards until I'm assured Wes Unsel will never ever make another personnel decision), lets Gilbert go and build around Butler, Jamison, and Blatche?

Bill Simmons

(1:25 PM)

I brought this up 2 weeks ago in my 2-part column about the East and all the Wiz fans went crazy. How can everyone not see that Gilbert hurts that team as long as he's a shoot-first PG? He got hurt and they immediately took off. We have 50 years of evidence to prove that shoot-first PG's don't end up winning playoff series - the Wiz only did well the past 2 years because the East was so weak. Just look at Pete Maravich's career.

DJ (Cranston,RI)

Hey Bill,thanks for making work go by a little faster...anyway, if you were Theo Epstein would you trade Buckholtz,Lester and Coco for Santana?

Bill Simmons

(1:26 PM)

In a heartbeat. That's not going to be nearly enough though.

Brendan: (NY, NY)

How do you feel about the writers' strike interfering with potentially not airing 24 and Lost in February?

Bill Simmons

(1:29 PM)

Well, it's going to happen so I don't think we need to use the word "potentially." The strike isn't getting resolved any time soon - for it to get resolved, Hollywood would have to feel like they completely understand internet revenue and where that medium is going, and they don't have the slightest idea, so to expect them to say, "Oh, yeah, here's your cut of royalties and ad sales" isn't realistic.

ryan (pleasant hill, ca)

Bill, has your opinion of the warriors changed at all? if barons body doesnt break down, and s jax doesn't go completely insane, they should be a lock for the playoffs. they've already dug their way out of that 0-6 hole.

Bill Simmons

(1:31 PM)

Absolutely not - I think they're a 30-win team if Baron isn't playing and a 45-win team when Baron is playing. Since he misses 15-20 games every year, and they're playing in a top-heavy conference, they should be around .500 or a little below.

Anand (Washington D.C.)

What about KG and LeBron jawing at each other last night...Was that actually playoff intensity in November?...Could the NBA be making a comeback?

Bill Simmons

(1:32 PM)

Yeah, I mentioned this 2 weeks ago - there are some legit rivalries now. The Cavs-Celts and Suns-Warriors games this week (and even Raps-Cavs on Saturday) were about as intense as you'll see in November. It's the best regular season in 15 years, no question.

Franco (NYC)

Bill, I work for TV Guide, and word around the office is that the writers' strike could be ending soon, and possibly a deal is in place. This is potentially very good news. Another rumor is that the season of 24 will be split in half. Half airing in the spring, then the second half in the fall. Finally, they have 8 Lost episodes in the can already, so we'll get at least those.

Bill Simmons

(1:33 PM)

That's great news, I hope it's true.

Brian (DC)

Who's been your favorite "celebrity" guest on the podcast? I really enjoyed Walton and Steve Kerr...

Bill Simmons

(1:36 PM)

I thought the two best podcasts so far were Marv Albert and Seth Meyers - marv because I hadn't heard him interviewed in so long, and Seth because I loved all the SNL stuff and hadn't heard a lot of it discussed before in a forum like that. But 90% of them have been really fun. Really, the only true clunker was the one with Tony Stewart, and that was partly my fault because I came out of the gate thinking that he drove a No. 33 car full-time when he only drives the No. 33 car part-time, so I think he went into "Who is this moron?" mode right away.

Adam Carolla (Pedif Isle)

You better say that I was your favorite!

Bill Simmons

(1:37 PM)

I can't count the Carolla podcasts because those are too easy.

Tom (Chicago)

Seriously, why would Shannahan kick to Hester? The Bears offense is as anemic as Sam from Rock of Love and yet teams to continue to kick to him. I absolutely think someone shoule be fired over this.

Bill Simmons

(1:40 PM)

Shanahan was showing the same stubbornness that he shows every year when he kills fantasy owners by juggling 4 RB's during the season. There were some nutty coaching decisions last weekend - Herm wasting the timeouts, Reid calling the game-ending slant and go when he should been chewing up clock, Mike Tomlin refusing to pass in the Miami game...

john (nyc)

Your chat gave me a great idea. It was a foregone conclusion that eventually would eventually break the chat record, so why not add the V Foundation to it and make money for a good cause. Why not do the same thing with Isiah, he's going to get fired anyway so why not turn it into a telethon, have Stern as the host and if over $1million is raised he's fired. Someone at the V Foundation needs to make this happen.

Paul (Merrill, WI)

Bill, since the Wizards are a much better team without Gilbert Arenas, what can they get for him that can improve their core squad?

Bill Simmons

(1:44 PM)

You know who could work? The Clippers. It would be a huge gamble for them obviously, but they could hope that A) Gilbert would see the value of playing in LA, and B) even if he signed somewhere else, they'd still get some sign-and-trade loot for him. But what if they offered Livingston (back in 2 months), Sam Cassell (expiring), Al Thornton and the rights to Minny's No. 1 pick for him? Wouldn't the Wiz have to at least think about it? Actually, that might be too much.

Andy (St. Paul, MN)

Why should we believe the Yankees will land Johan Santana? Phillip Hughes is pretty good but Melky Cabrera will be no better than an average regular. Why would the Twins take that deal when they could get much better players from teams like the Dodgers, Angels and Red Sox? The Dodgers could top the offer with Kemp/Kershaw, the Angels with Kendrick/Adenhart and the Red Sox with Ellsbury/Buccholz.

Bill Simmons

(1:44 PM)

I disagree - if the Yanks put Hughes, Kennedy, Melky and Cano on the table, how could the Twins turn that down? I also think Melky is decidedly above-average - he's better than Coco Crisp.

Tulsi (Washington, DC)

As A wife of a sports guy fanatic, I was wondering what your thoughts were on the Bachelor not picking either woman this season? Do you think he was sincere or in it for the publicity?

Bill Simmons

(1:46 PM)

We didn't watch the Bachelor this year because the Sports Gal was boycotting after she did the blog last spring for free and the only thing she asked for was a one-year Disneyland pass and ABC ended up screwing her over on it.

Bill Simmons

(1:46 PM)

You don't mess with the Sports Gal.

Nicole(Cary, NC)

Hi Bill....I am Jim Valvano's daughter Nicole...just checking out the chat...thanks to you and everyone at ESPN for making Jimmy V week possible. My family and I are very excited and my dad would be very proud of all that is being done in his name to fund cancer research and one day find a cure!! Good luck and have a great chat!

Bill Simmons

(1:47 PM)

Thanks Nicole! Great to hear from you. Here's the link for the Jimmy V Foundation again... https://www.jimmyv.org/donate/donations/

Dan (Somerville, MA)

Is there a Klosterman podcast in our future? It seems like such a no-brainer mid-season NBA conversation.

Bill Simmons

(1:48 PM)

Absolutely. It might be the first-ever marathon podcast. I don't even know how we'd pick the topics, how do you narrow it down to 5-6 things?

Emmitt (Bristol)

Don't quit, don't even quit.

Bill Simmons

(1:48 PM)

Thanks Emmitt.

Buster Olney (Bristol, CT)

Do you not read my blog? Why not just let Johan hit the free agent market and pay for him instead of unloading prospects?

Bill Simmons

(1:49 PM)

I read your blog every day, Buster! That sounds good on paper, but if you're the Yanks, can you take the chance that the Mets or Red Sox won't step in on you this winter? No.

Bill Simmons

(1:52 PM)

I actually thought Buster made a great point this week about the value of Danny Haren compared to Johan - not only would he cost less to get, but he's locked into a reasonable contract for the next 3 years (something like $17m total) and he's a 220-IP horse. Maybe he doesn't have the ceiling that Johan has, but he'd be the Yanks's No. 1 starter. Actually, it almost makes more sense for the Twins to do a 3-way where they give up Johan but get Haren as part of the haul back, then Oakland gets a piece of the prospects. For instance, let's say they get Haren and Cano, the A's get Kennedy, Hughes and Cabrera and the Yanks get Johan... wouldn't that work for everybody?

Nathan (Boulder)

Is it too early to get excited about the last season of The Wire? Got any predictions? I have to believe that McNulty is going down, Bubs too, hell everyone could get screwed in the end and I wouldn't be shocked. The best prediction I heard was that Michael kills Omar.

Bill Simmons

(1:52 PM)

Too early??? They had me at hello, or in this case, the "McNulty's drinking again" ad.

Jim (Fishers, IN)

They can absolutely take the chance, all Hank has to do is announce publicly, "Hey, Johan, wait till next year, veto all trades, and we'll give you $30 mill a year." What are they going to do? Fine him?

Bill Simmons

(1:53 PM)

Don't give Hank any ideas! He might actually take you up on this. Right now, he's chain-smoking in front of his laptop, wearing a smoking jacket and thinking, "Hmmmmm... can I do that?"

JD (Amherst, MA)

Jimmy Valvano's ESPY speech is my favorite speech of all time. Anyways, how do the Yanks just let go of Cano, Melky, and two of their top young pitchers for Johan? I mean I know his worth, but that is four studs of the future. Wouldn't this be against everything Cashman wanted for the past few years?

Bill Simmons

(1:54 PM)

You're assuming that Cashman has any say any this at all. I don't think he does.

Rich (Kingston, ON, Canada)

Bill, did I read that correctly? You said that you would be willing to send Buchholz, Lester AND Ellsbury to MIN for Santana and you believed that wouldn't be enough?? There is no way in the world that any Sox fan should want to see that entire trio go out the window for a pitcher who's numbers declined last year. If it costs that (or more) let the Yankees sell the farm for him.

Bill Simmons

(1:55 PM)

You read it incorrectly - it was Buchholz, Lester and Crisp.

Bill Simmons

(1:56 PM)

I am a big proponent of trading pitching prospects for sure thing starters. If you go thru the recent history of elite pitching prospects, the odds of them actually making it and becoming great pitchers for an extended period of time are pretty slim. Remember in '97, when the Red Sox gave Montreal the choice of 2 from Brian Rose, Carl Pavano and Tony Armas Jr. for Pedro? Those were the crown jewels of their farm system.

Ben (Poughkeepsie, NY)

If you could pick a three-player combo from any team in the NBA right now and have that be the nucleus of your own team for the next five years, who would you pick? Is it LeBron and the pu pu platter or is there another option?

Bill Simmons

(1:58 PM)

Hmmm... I assume you mean 3 players with the same team.

Bill Simmons

(1:58 PM)

I'd go with LeBron and the pu pu platter. He has finally entered that MJ Mode and it's really not going to matter who his teammates are over the next 10 years, as long as they are decent.

Eric, NYC

What did you think of Wes Welker's molestache Sunday night? Can we please get him a nickname?

Bill Simmons

(1:59 PM)

I am a staunch supporter of all bad facial hair.

Scott (Charlottesville, Va)

Do you think the Redskins can recover from the emotional loss of Sean Taylor? All the players and coaches (especially Coach Gibbs and Williams) are obviously devastated and they have still have to prepare for and play 2 tough home games in the next 9 days. But what a great story it would make if they could harness the emotion, string together some wins and make into the playoffs. If I were a NFC super bowl hopeful, I would not want to play an emotionally charged team with this much talent in the playoffs. (Even if they have struggled all year)

Bill Simmons

(2:01 PM)

Nobody knows how it will play out - it's impossible to say. Football is the one sport where emotion can carry you to a higher place so it's going to be fascinating to see how they respond. The problem is that he was one of their best players and they weren't deep to begin with.

Owen, Boston

Is the emergence of Hank Steinbrenner as villian one of the best things to happen to the Red Sox-Yankees rivalry? I am really excited about this. With old George looking more and more frail, I was starting to feel bad for him. It was getting hard to hate him. But now the Empire has a new dictator. Cashman has been neutered, and Hank is going to stop at nothing to prove he is his father's equal. This has to mean bad things for the NYY, doesn't it?

Bill Simmons

(2:02 PM)

Yes. It's otherwordly. I can't wait until he lobs the first grenade at the Sox and Lucchino fires back with both barrels.

Forest: (Minneapolis)

Randomly I am forced to stay at work until 6 tonight which turns out to be the best punishment ever. I started watching the Wire on demand this fall and it has consumed me. It may be responsible for me failing out of school. Everything you have said about it is accurate. You can't hype the show up too much. Who's your favorite character? Its gotta be Lester or Omar, right?

Bill Simmons

(2:03 PM)

My favorite is McNulty, with Omar a close second and the beaten-down kid who always has to wear stinky clothes third.

John (NY, NY)

Did u catch last weeks Real World? The flop Parisa took was NBA worthy. Tell Isiah to give her a call.

Bill Simmons

(2:05 PM)

You're right, she looked like Manu Ginobili on that one. I love the Parisa-Tricia feud, it's like trying to pick a side during the Iran-Iraq war in the 80's, there's really no conceivable way to come up with a favorite.

Bill Simmons

(2:05 PM)

Good God, I just realized that we're only at the 2-hour mark. I feel sick.

Steve (Denver, CO)

In your articles you seem to regard Hakeem Olajuwon very highly, though to me it seems he does not get enough love when people talk about the NBA greats of the most recent glory years (early to mid 90's). Why is that?

Bill Simmons

(2:07 PM)

Every decade, one great NBA player gets lost in the web of history and he was the guy from the 90's. In the 80's, it was Moses. In the 70's, it was Clyde Frazier. In the 60's, it was Sam Jones. In the 50's, Bob Pettit.

Philly Fan in DC

Bill...can things be any worse for Philadelphia area teams? I was 10 when the Sixers won the last city championship. I suffered thru Joe Carter and Cowboy Super Bowls in college. I got a concussion from the Scott Stevens hit on Eric Lindros. Had to suffer thru Charles Barkley trashing the city on MNF earlier this year. Now...I fear McNabb will be lifting the Lombardi trophy for another team. Please give me hope.

Bill Simmons

(2:09 PM)

Yeah, Philly somehow replaced Boston as the most tortured major sports city and there's no real light at the end of the tunnel.

Bill Simmons

(2:10 PM)

In 5 weeks, it will officially be 25 years since the last Philly championship. What's the record for consecutive years that a city with 4 sports teams HASN'T won a title? Can somebody look this up?

Buckshot (Gary, Ind)

When did it become alright for guys to start shaving their armpits? Seriously, anytime I watch a basketball game and the dude is at the free throw line, his pits are shaved. Am I the only one disturbed by this trend??

Bill Simmons

(2:12 PM)

Was this an NBA question or a WNBA question?

Paul (Westport, CT)

I disagree about Buchholz, Lester, and Crisp not being enough. The only reason I think this is because he's only got 1 year and he can automatically veto any trade if he doesn't get the extension he wants. So in short, it's Buchholz, Lester, Crisp, a 72 hour negotiation window, and a eventual 7/145 million dollar mega deal. I think I might be the only one who doesn't want to give up that much for Santana.

Bill Simmons

(2:14 PM)

Here's the thing: if they landed Johan without touching anyone from the TOP FIFTEEN from last year's team, don't you have to do it? It's a no-brainer in my mind, although I'm not sure it would be a good trade for the sports of baseball as a whole.

Eric Gagne

Bill, will I get resigned by the Red Sox this offseason, they haven't even called yet

Bill Simmons

(2:14 PM)

Eric, it's not looking good. Might be a smart move to start putting your stuff into some boxes...

The White Sam Perkins (Toronto, Ont.)

"Philly has SOMEHOW relaced Boston as the most tortured city???" Uh, you've won 2 World Series in the last 5 years and are odds on favourites to win the NBA Eastern Conference and Super Bowl. Boston is no longer tortured Billy, lose the inferiority complex

Bill Simmons

(2:15 PM)

I meant that Philly had replaced Boston pre-2002... once the Pats won the Super Bowl, we shed the label I think.

Dave, Va Beach

that 4 team city with the longest championship draught is Philly. It's been since 1983 any team has won a championship

Luke (Birmingham, AL)

What's it like as a Pats fan to cheer for the 2005 Indianapolis Colts? Amazing offense, suspect defense (with slow, aging LBs), one and done in the playoffs...

Bill Simmons

(2:17 PM)

I have to say, the parallels are a little scary. We haven't seen anyone win in January without a running game and with a suspect defense. Here's the question though - are they protecting Maroney by not running him that much (to keep him fresh in January), or do they think he's not that good? I think they're saving him for late in the season, personally. Remember, his backups are Kevin Faulk and Heath Evans right now.

John (Toronto, Canada)

Whats up with no one realizing that the Patriots worst threat is a healthy Indy team.....I dont get how no one sees that this Indy team is the best they've had in recent years, but still no talk of a Superbowl....what do you think?

Bill Simmons

(2:19 PM)

Doesn't the Freeney thing kill them a little though? Part of what made their D so good was the speed of their ends, and now one of them is gone.

Tony (Toronto)

Hey, Bill - just wondering if there was anything that could happen to the sport of hockey to get you interested again, or if you're totally and eternally done. Thoughts?

Bill Simmons

(2:20 PM)

I would come back if they completely re-invented the league - 22 teams, 11 in Canada, 11 in USA.

Matt (Los Gatos, CA)

What are your thoughts on LOST with Season 4 approaching? Season one was one of the most groundbreaking seasons in television, season two was pretty weak, season 3 was promising and now we know that the next two seasons have to start explaining things. I feel like LOST is like Kevin Spacey's plan in Se7en, that people are going to be amazed when the whole picture is seen.

Bill Simmons

(2:23 PM)

Between that and the Wire, I'm beyind excited for January. (Let's hope the writer's strike ends soon.) The thing about "Lost" is that, unlike a lot of these shows, it appears they sketched everything out ahead of time and have a definite ending and last season planned, unlike a lot of these shows that chug along until people stop watching them. So we know Lost will be good until the very end. I am still reeling from the glimpse-at-the-future episode, I don't remember having my world rocked like that by a TV show since Kimberly took off her wig on Melrose Place.

Jarrett (Wallingford, CT)

Bill, I think you are too much in Cobra Kai-Patriots mode right now. You're thinking like a yankee fan! Yes, Santana is a GREAT pitcher, but he's going to cost a fortune in prospects and dollars, esp. for a team that just won the world series. It's so much more fulfilling as a fan to watch and root for home grown players than to buy other teams' allstars. Keep Buchholz, Lester and Ellsbury, hang on to the veterans, and let the Evil Empire sell the farm for Santana. The youngsters are what give a that spark, or did you already forget about the bullpen symphony orchestra?

Bill Simmons

(2:26 PM)

I would agree with this except Johan is ridiculously good - he's the best pitcher to come on the market in 10 years. I'm in an AL auction league and he goes for $10-12 more than any other pitcher in the league each season. You put him with Beckett and it's lights out.

Matt Baltimore, Maryland

Not a lot of college football on this chat, but you might take interest in this question because it involves one of your own. What do you think of Charlie Weis and the Irish and his plan to talk with the Patriots staff to tell him what a crappy job he is doing?

Bill Simmons

(2:28 PM)

Remember when Charlie left and everyone was saying how the Pats were screwed? Kinda funny. I don't follow College FB that closely, although I have been watching the BC games and rooting against them... but it's incredible to me that ND could ever suck. It's just not conceivable. It would be like the Red Sox or Yankees finishing 60-102 with a $150 million payroll. How do they not get a top-10 recruiting class every year?

Bill Simmons

(2:28 PM)

Remember when Charlie left and everyone was saying how the Pats were screwed? Kinda funny. I don't follow College FB that closely, although I have been watching the BC games and rooting against them... but it's incredible to me that ND could ever suck. It's just not conceivable. It would be like the Red Sox or Yankees finishing 60-102 with a $150 million payroll. How do they not get a top-10 recruiting class every year?

Dan Milwaukee, WI

Bill, Heading to Vegas next weekend. Hatton or Mayweather? And what sleeper NBA team should I put a future bet on for the title?

Bill Simmons

(2:29 PM)

I like Hatton only because he's going to make Floyd break a sweat and Floyd seems like he's in the "Rocky during the first 25 minutes of Rocky 3" stage of his career right now. Hold on, lemme check the NBA odds to find a sleeper, gimme a second...

Bill Simmons

(2:31 PM)

OK...

Bill Simmons

(2:32 PM)

The 2nd-best longshot bet is the Bulls at 50-1 because they could end up making a 3-for-1 trade that would put them right back into the mix, and if they get the 8th seed, anything's possible if they somehow landed Kobe, mcGrady, Amare or whomever.

Bill Simmons

(2:33 PM)

The best longshot bet is the Cavs at 25-1 because of the way LeBron is playing - if they got Varejao back, they could have enough to sneak back into the Finals, and at that point, anything is possible. He wasn't definitively the best player in the league last season, but he is now and it's not close.

Bill Simmons

(2:34 PM)

For a lower-odds bet, I like Utah at 18-to-1 and Orlando is semi-intriguing at 12-to-1 because they have one more trade to make (they have three expiring contracts).

Bill Simmons

(2:35 PM)

It's crazy to me that orlando has much higher odds than the Celts right now - I think the Magic would beat them in a series.

Ken (Tarzana, Ca)

I know you're a Red Sox fan, but hasn't baseball gotten completely boring considering only 3-5 teams even have a shot at signing the truly great players. Personally, if my Padres trade away Peavy in the next couple of years, I'm done with baseball.

Bill Simmons

(2:38 PM)

I mean... it's not a good thing. The problem is that those 3-5 teams are figuring out how to take advantage of their financial advantage, which is going to make baseball less and less fun as the decade progresses. Look at that Rockies-Red Sox series - Boston's mistake contracts alone nearly added up to Colorado's entire roster. I don't think this is good.

Bill Simmons

(2:39 PM)

I love the idea of changing the leagues around and having a big market league and a small market league, with the leagues changing each year depending on payrolls (a little like how things move around in the EPL). It would never, EVER happen, and they could never figure out the schedules in time, but it seems a little more fair that the big market teams would be battling in one league and the small market teams in another.

Craig (NY NY)

When is it ok to let go of your first fart in front of a new girlfriend. When did you let your first one rip in front of sports gal?

Bill Simmons

(2:40 PM)

The 3-week mark. Not before, not after.

Dave (Boston)

Just because only 3-5 teams can afford the big names and you don't think it will be 'good' for baseball, will you stop watching and loving the Red Sox?

Bill Simmons

(2:41 PM)

Of course not! If you're a Red Sox fan, it's fantastic. I just think there's more of an art to what the Pats have done and keep doing - they are dominating under the exact same rules and restrictions as everyone else.

Bill Simmons

(2:42 PM)

(Hold on, I'll save you some time: "BUT THEY CHEAT!")

Colin A (Montrose, TX)

What are the odds that another former #1 pick in the NBA will later become a NASCAR analyst? A billion-to-one?

Bill Simmons

(2:43 PM)

Maybe even higher. By the way, do you know who the last No. 1 pick was in the NBA who was a four year senior?

Ken (Tarzana, Ca)

Isn't it kind of ridiculous to say the the pitching market was set with the Barry Zito contract? That's like saying the market was set when Cameron Diaz got 20M for Charlie's Angels.

Bill Simmons

(2:45 PM)

Couldn't agree more. I've riffed about this before, can't remember the column, but the analogy I used was a group of girlfriends where one girl gets a ludicrously big diamond ring from her rich a-hole boyfriend, so all of her friends decide that they should also be getting ludicrously big diamond rings because that's the market that's been established. And in this case, Scott Boras is the rich a-hole boyfriend.

Ryan (Newark, NJ)

KENYON MARTIN!

Bill Simmons

(2:45 PM)

You are correct! This was the trivia question of the game for a Celts game recently and I missed it. It's almost a trick question.

Jon

Bill, Does this year have the potential to be the best all-star game of all time... Think of the crunch time lineups. For the East you go Howard, Garnett, Lebron, Wade, and Kidd. For the West you go Duncan, Nowitsski, T-Mac, Kobe, Nash. How is that that not among the greatest group of players to ever take the floor for the final 6 minutes of a game?

Bill Simmons

(2:47 PM)

Wow, I didn't even think of that!

Bill Simmons

(2:47 PM)

The East would definitely be: Howard, KG, LeBron, Wade and Kidd, right?

Bill Simmons

(2:48 PM)

The West would be: Duncan, Dirk, Kobe, Nash... and I'd have to go with Melo over T-Mac.

Bill Simmons

(2:49 PM)

And amazingly, I don't think Chris Paul gets on the court!

Linda (Erie, PA)

Are you kidding me with saying the Yankees are giving up Hughes AND Cano, plus more for Santana?? NO WAY!

Bill Simmons

(2:50 PM)

Um, have you seen who's running your team right now? His favorite actress is Jennifer Love Hewitt. http://www.nypost.com/seven/11252007/sports/ yankees/serbys_sunday_qa_ with____433113.htm?page=0

Rob, NY

What's your take on Ellisbury, is his ceiling higher than Damon?

Bill Simmons

(2:51 PM)

Do you mean his baseball ceiling or his "number of hot girls in the sack" ceiling?

Josh (Sheboygan, WI)

So the Lakers have to make some kind of deal at this point right? Which is more likely, moving Kobe, or getting him some help?

Bill Simmons

(2:51 PM)

Do you mean player help or psychological help?

Nick, Toronto

Congrats SG - in confirming you NBA all-star picks, you have opened the flood gates to countless enraged Raptors fans undoubtably screaming for CB4 to be included ...

Bill Simmons

(2:52 PM)

BRING IT ON! Who is Bosh supplanting in that game? Dwight Howard or KG? Gimme a break.

Kamal (Babson College)

I think it hit me last night when the Celts couldn't get KG going consistently in the paint. Is KG too unselfish? He needs to just take over soon (and I realize he was being double teamed, but would I be wrong in saying only 50% of the time). Allen has to stop driving to the basket through 4 defenders too and work the ball around. He takes a lot of bad shots driving to the hoop that I'd rather see KG take 9 out of ten times.

Bill Simmons

(2:54 PM)

I am still forming my conclusions about KG as a player from watching him every game for a month, so I don't want to say anything definitively yet, but I will say this: I have a better understanding now as to why his Minnesota teams never won. He's too content to let other people on his team decide games. In fact, the only time I remember him saying, "I AM DECIDING THIS GAME!!!!!" was the 7th game of the Kings series in 2004.

Brandon (Austin, TX)

Wow, how did the Celts miss Beno Udrih? We will give you Bibby for some picks. Our chemistry is much better with this Euro.

Bill Simmons

(2:55 PM)

That's an excellent question and I don't have an answer for you.

Jay K., Denver CO

Who was the last 4 year Collegiate GRADUATE selected #1 in the NBA Draft? "Know what I'm saying?"

Jeff (NJ)

The Twins don't even WANT Cano or Wang because they don't want to pay them in arbitration, which would be a back breaker for them. Much more likely is a deal of Hughes, Kennedy, Cabrera, and Austin Jackson, the Yanks best minor league position player. And the Twins would be insane not to take it because the Dodgers and Sox aren't going to trade the farm away and the Angles are positioning to trade for Miguel Cabrera.

Bill Simmons

(2:58 PM)

Good points, although they could easily spin Cano into more pieces. Please tell me the Angels wouldn't actually give up Howie Kendrick in a Cabrera trade. My AL-keeper team already lost Joel Zumaya because a box fell on him. Now we're going to lose Howie because the Angels want to roll the dice with another Latin guy with a weight problem???

Hector (Los Angles, CA)

Do you think boxing should adopt the "special guest referee" routine to spice up boxing... I think Iron Mike would be great for boxing in this role.. just watching him butcher the pre fight instructions to the fighters would be worth the price of the ppv.

Bill Simmons

(2:58 PM)

You just came up with the hook for Season 4 of the Contender.

Luke (New York, NY)

That Walton podcast was great for the first 45 minutes but the last five were fascinating. He nearly broke down when you accused him of breaking up the Blazers and still hasn't read Breaks of the Game?!?!? Given his childhood, UCLA, injuries, counter cultural background is it possible that Bill Walton is the most interesting sports icon we all sort of know. I feel like only Halberstam could have really done his story justice but you've got to get him back on the podcast and get into the Blazer days.

Bill Simmons

(3:00 PM)

You know, I couldn't tell if he was mad at the end there as it was happening, but when I listened to it again, it seemed like he was a little perturbed. Here's the thing: He was one of my favorite guests that I've had, and he was gracious to give me that much time, but he DID say at the beginning that nothing was off-limits, and he DID mention at least 3 times during the interview how tragic it was that the '77 Blazers fell apart for a variety of reasons...

Bill Simmons

(3:01 PM)

By the last time, I just felt like I couldn't NOT bring it up. I mean, he sued the team for medical malpractice and signed a lucrative free agent deal with San Diego, and once that happened, the '77 Blazers officially fell apart. So I didn't see how we could keep bringing up the 77 Blazers without bringing that up.

Bill Simmons

(3:02 PM)

Oh, well.

John (WI)

Holding a cup of coffee for you as you run by.....Over 3 hours, nice!

Mike (Albany)

You still have 3 1/2 hours to go! How ya holding up?

Bill Simmons

(3:03 PM)

Feeling good, as long as the quality questions keep coming, and as long as the high-level cocaine I borrowed from Lindsay Lohan is working its magic, I think I can pull this off.

John (MN)

Are the T-Wolves the most exciting 2-10 team ever? Who wouldn't love a team with the likes of Corey Brewer, Randy Foye, Craig Smith, and Rashad McCants. The roster is a college basketball fan's dream team. Plus Mark Madsen!

Bill Simmons

(3:04 PM)

That's one of the great things about this NBA season - even the bad teams are fun to watch. Minny has fun young players, so does Philly, the Knicks are like a car crash where you can't look away, Seattle has Durant...

Simon (Pueblo, CO)

Kobe to Denver for Carmelo, mix in some other guys for cap reasons, tell me why this is bad for either team.

Bill Simmons

(3:04 PM)

Kobe... Colorado... um... I mean...

Nugsy Bogues (Lex, KY)

Have you looked at college basketball yet? Any sleepers?

Bill Simmons

(3:06 PM)

Just getting into it - watched Derrick Rose twice, watched OJ once, watched Gordon once, haven't seen Love yet. Starting next month, I'm diving in. More importantly, it looks like Rob Stone and I might get to do some crappy ESPNU games again! Why can't we get the call up for crappy ESPN2 games????

Jon (McComb, MS)

wow, all this Kobe talk on the chat has me nervous. I have Hornets tickets to see the Lakers on March 21. It will be my first NBA game. What are the chances Kobe is still there?

Bill Simmons

(3:07 PM)

I'm going to go with 0 percent.

Biggs (Boston)

Whats the food situation during the marathon? Munchies, dips, delivery? You have to be getting hungry by now.

Bill Simmons

(3:08 PM)

There's some Astroburger drive-thru in my future according to the Sports Gal. Which reminds me, the pineapple milkshake from Astroburger is one of the 12 best things about living in LA.

Jason (Miami,FL)

MELO OVER T-MAC?!? Seriously? Did Tracy kill your dog or something? You are constantly under-rating his game. While he may have folded in Game 7 last year, the guy is a great end of the game player. There is reason the Rockets are 10-1,342 when he doesn't play. He comes through more times than not. Did you see him single handedly close out your Clippers 2 nights ago? I am not even a huge McGrady fan, but as one the 19 remaining NBA fans I felt the need tell you that your your bias against him is starting to get a little ridiculous.

Bill Simmons

(3:11 PM)

I just like Melo more than T-Mac for that particular team - you have Duncan down low, Melo and Dirk spotting up, Kobe as Kobe and Nash running the show. I don't think you need T-Mac, I'd rather have Melo because of his quick release from 20. Truth be told, the best 5th wheel for that group would be Kirilenko, but he's not making the team, You could also make a strong case for sticking Boozer in there and going big with Dirk at small forward.

Dan (Louisville, KY)

Speaking of your buddy Rob Stone, he's the new play-by-play guy for the PBA pro bowling tour. Any chance of you making a cameo on one of those broadcasts for a fun little segment about how good the pros are compared to the average bowler? I'm sure America would love to see you and Rob battle to see who could break 100 while one of the pros drops a 268 game against you.

Bill Simmons

(3:12 PM)

It's in the works - need to figure out the perfect Sunday so it would probably be after NFL season. The funny thing is that Rob gets 3X the audience for bowling than he does for his favorite sport (soccer).

Karl (Paradise City, Nebraska)

Bill, I realize you write nothing about college football, but do you have any thoughts on the coaching change at Nebraska? What about Pelini, who coached under Belichick?

Bill Simmons

(3:13 PM)

I thought it was funny that they hired Bill Callahan in the first place - it was like when Pitt hired Dave Wannestadt. Um, didn't they see the tapes from their NFL games?

McCredy (Chicago)

While watching the Bulls put up a stellar 34 first half points on the Hawks last night I also got to enjoy the following promos for upcoming games: Decemeber 9th is Bulls Winter Gloves Night and on the 11th it'll be Bulls Ice Scraper Night. I kid you not. Can it get any worse for your preseason Eastern Conference titlist?

Bill Simmons

(3:14 PM)

So funny... I saw the same "Ice Scraper Night" promo and thought, "This is why Kobe blocked that trade, he probably saw the Ice Scraper Night" promo and thought, "What am I doing?????"

Steve T. (Middletown, CT)

Any thoughts on the sad state of affairs for Hulk Hogan? His wife filed for divorce, his son drives like Lindsay and Britney, his daughter's singing career.... What has become of the Hulkster?

Bill Simmons

(3:16 PM)

He's at the point of his real life where he's getting choked out in the middle of the ring, and the ref keeps raising his left arm to see if he's asleep yet, only he hasn't raised his arm up and held up one finger yet. I think it's coming. He'll bounce back. He's Hulk Hogan, for God's sake!

Jesse (Chicago)

Bill, I am disappointed that none of my questions have been answered yet. I know you are busy, but I actually did donate to Jimmy V Foundation. I figured a response wasn't too much to ask... I'm out

Bill Simmons

(3:17 PM)

Trying to read as many questions as I can... we're up to 37,500 thru 3 hours... so I might miss a few, it's nothing personal.

Bill Simmons

(3:17 PM)

Trying to read as many questions as I can... we're up to 37,500 thru 3 hours... so I might miss a few, it's nothing personal.

Steve (Philadelphia, PA)

Hulk will bounce back - he's hosting the new American Gladiators show coming out.

Bill Simmons

(3:18 PM)

Plus, he has the special section in US Weekly where he gets to give verdicts on who got the better of celebrity feuds.

Barbara (Boston)

Speaking of Minnesota bb - Was Sebastian Telfair overhyped in high school or has he just not improved as much as he could/should have?

Bill Simmons

(3:19 PM)

He was properly hyped. He has all the same skills he had in HS, the problem is that he can't get to the rim, which was a huge part of his game in HS. In the NBA, he kills guys off the dribble and gets to the rim, only there's always a 6-10 guy waiting for him. And he doesn't have a great outside shot, so what's left?

Rick (Chicago)

My friends and I have a running game where we try and think of the creepiest thing you could say to a female co-worker that won't necessarily get you a visit from your good ole' HR rep. We came up with two stellar lines. The first is getting mildly close to your coworker and saying, "Did you change your shampoo?", and the other is looking them dead in the eye and saying, "Wow, you have a really pretty mouth." What are some of your sugge....wait, hold on...my manager wants to see me...

Bill Simmons

(3:21 PM)

We're about 4 hours early for "Yup, these are my readers..."

Andrew (Columbus, OH)

What is funny is that my friends are giving me crap for the Pats ALMOST losing. I have never experienced that in my life. How about you?

Bill Simmons

(3:21 PM)

Um... no.

Bill Simmons

(3:22 PM)

I was in the hardware store 2 weeks ago wearing a green Celtics shirt and the guy at the register looked at the shirt, looked at me and said, "Man, I hate Boston, you guys win EVERYTHING." That's never happened either.

Joe (Waco,TX)

How likely is a Suns trade for Camby, like the one mentioned above, given the affinity in AZ for Amare and the status of the league as a No B**** Association? Kerr seems smart enough to break this mold, but I don't know. As a Spurs fan, this trade scares me to death. It would definitely kill us.

Bill Simmons

(3:24 PM)

I think Kerr is one of the few GM's in the league with the balls to trade someone like Amare - he played on five champs and understands the value of defense, and right now, this team can't stop anyone. I also don't think they're a very tough team - they're even softer than usual. G-State was running a layup line on them on Monday night and none of the Suns even bothered to knock 1 guy down. I don't think that's a good sign for their season.

President Bush (Air Force Won)

Bill's winning the war on chat rooms!

Bill Simmons

(3:25 PM)

Thank you Mr. President!

Bill Simmons

(3:25 PM)

Thank you Mr. President!

shlomo (new rochelle, NY)

I think that Doc is overplaying the Big 3, minutes-wise. Can Ray Allen's ankles hold up for 40+ minutes a game? Speaking of the Big 3, no one has penned a great nickname for them yet

Bill Simmons

(3:26 PM)

Ray Allen's legs already look tired and it's Nov. 28th. I think you might be right. I would not play him more than 30 mins a game, EVER, under any circumstances other than OT.

Bill Simmons

(3:27 PM)

By the way, I hate calling those guys the Big Three, it's a complete outrage - even worse than Tomlinson stealing LT's nickname. I vote that we call them KG, Paul and Ray - let's see them win a playoff series before we're doling out nicknames.

Bill Simmons

(3:27 PM)

Good God, i just turned into Skip Bayless.

Nic (Columbus, OH)

Since you are throwing around trade ideas...Any chance at all of the Cavs getting out from under Larry Hughes' god-awful contract? He's an over-priced 2 guard with baggage - the Knicks have to be interested right?

Bill Simmons

(3:28 PM)

It's the 2nd-worst contract in the league besides K-Mart, so no, there's no chance.

Tim (New York, NY)

Did it strike you as a little odd the way Hank Steinbrenner refers to his dad exclusively in the past tense, like he's already dead, in the Post article?

Bill Simmons

(3:30 PM)

it definitely helped my theory from two summers ago that George is like the first president in Dave right now: http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/ story?page=simmons/050706

Ryan H. (Orlando, Fl)

Gyllenhal is going to play Broadway Joe in an upcoming film. Who plays Suzie Kolber?

Bill Simmons

(3:31 PM)

Hmmmmm... I'll go with Soleil Moon-Frye. She's due for a comeback.

Rich (Pine Plains, NY)

Well Bill, another day, another few questions left unanswered. But it's okay, cuz I'm not the one filtering throuigh 40,000 questions, you are. I'll try again when I get back from work. Ever heard of Ronnybrook Milk?, it's great, you should come swing by the farm and cop some free stuff, I've got some pull around there. Good luck buddy. And may the spirit of Jimmy V carry you on to the record, and let us all remember thaty no matter what hardships you go through there will always be light at the end of the tunnell, unless you're a Philidelphia sports fan. I'm out!

Bill Simmons

(3:31 PM)

Rich, I saw that one! Thanks for your persistence...

Michael (Austin, Tx)

How come you didn't to the top 40 NBA trade value column this year?

Bill Simmons

(3:32 PM)

It's coming soon... I've been working on it.

Josh (Springfield, MO)

You mentioned that the Astroburger shake is in the top 12 best things about living in LA. What are the other 11 items?

Bill Simmons

(3:32 PM)

Hmmmm...

Bill Simmons

(3:33 PM)

I'm going to have to answer that in a mail bag... I don't want to screw that one up.

Matthew (Columbus,OH)

Hey Bill are you a fan of Kevin Smith? He just announced his new movie will star Seth Rogen (quickly becoming a huge comedy star) and Elizabeth Banks (a very underrated and good looking actress). The best part is the title "Zach and Miri Make a Porno." Can this movie go wrong?

Bill Simmons

(3:36 PM)

On paper, I like everything in that paragraph. I do like Kevin Smith - his movies always have just enough going on in them that you never feel like you wasted 90 minutes of your life. He's on my short list of "Podcast Guests I want To Get," along with Larry David and Hank Steinbrenner.

Greg (East Brunswick, NJ)

Bill, what made you decide to roll with a Pineapple shake? That sounds pretty risky on the surface. I am curious what other options Astroburger has to choose from.

Bill Simmons

(3:38 PM)

Here's how you know it's good: We rolled the dice because of word of mouth. It's insanely good. Same goes for the ice cream at Mashti Malones and the porch pies from www.porchpies.com (which can only be delivered to you if you live in LA). The buttermilk porch pie from Porchpies.com is the single greatest pie in the history of pies.

Hank Steinbrenner (Stadium Club)

If you got the smokes, I'm on board.

Bill Simmons

(3:38 PM)

Let's do it Hank!

Owen, Boston

What are your thoughts on Gregg Easterbrook's continued assault on the Patriots in his TMQ column? It seems to me that Easterbrook got all hot and bothered about the Spygate controversy and predicted Belichick wouldn't be the coach by the end of the season. Then when it turned out to be not that big of a deal, he looked stupid, so he turned into a conspiracy theorist and bitterly complains about running up the score. Either that or he is actually Ron Borges in disguise.

Bill Simmons

(3:40 PM)

I am a big believer that everyone is entitled to their opinion and that writers should be coming up with their own material instead of complaining about stuff that other writers wrote. With that said, the Good/Evil column in which Gregg compared Brady's smirk to Dick Cheney rubbed me the wrong way... if you're writing a satirical column (which he claimed was the case the following week), then the readers need to know that you're, um, being satirical.

Bill Simmons

(3:42 PM)

I've definitely written passages wrong over the years that didn't come out the way I had intended them to come out, but the only time I ever screwed up an entire column was the thing I wrote about New Orleans during Super Bowl week in 2002 - I was trying to be over the top about the city and I just did a bad job. So I would say that he did a bad job with that column, and he admitted as much the next week, although I don't think he was emphatic enough about it.

Craig (Baltimore, MD)

Will you ever re-release your Boston Sports Guy columns? Like many of your readers I've only seen your ESPN work. I would love to read your early stuff even if it means slitting my wrists from reading more love notes about the Celtics, Red Sox and Patriots. Plus can you hint at all on the new book???

Bill Simmons

(3:44 PM)

The old BSG columns are like anything else - people probably assume they're better than they actually were. It's like when they started releasing those DVD's of shows from the 70's and 80s and you'd think, "Wow, I can't wait to watch 3's Company, that was the funniest show ever!" and then you watched the show and it wasn't so good anymore. That's what a lot of those old columns would be like. I was depressed when I was putting together my Red Sox book because I had to perform surgery on those '98-'00 columns to make them readable.

Paul: Maine

Hey Bill is this going to turn into a Rosie Ruiz situation where the Sports Gal sneaks in from the kitchen and finishes your marathon? Don't Even Give Up!

Bill Simmons

(3:45 PM)

I actually might have her step in for 10 minutes and take some questions...

Justin (Brussels, Belgium)

How do you feel about the possibility of your kids growing up in L.A. becoming Lakers fans to spite thier Dad?

Bill Simmons

(3:47 PM)

I will be gone by the time they are old enough to potentially play the "Why can't we root for the Lakers, that's the local team!" card.

Joe (Grand Rapids, MI)

William (does anyone call you that), I have to believe that on you're short list of podcast guests has to be Larry Bird. I think that would be the best guest, 80's b-ball, the dream team, Jermaine O'Neal, the Bird Exception, the McHale - Ainge trade. The possibilities are endless.

Bill Simmons

(3:48 PM)

I couldn't have Larry on - it would be like a 40-minute episode of the Chris Farley Show.

Jeff (KCMO)

Bill, love your podcasts. I would love to hear your overall opinion on Kansas City sports scene in general. How much about this city do ya know?

Bill Simmons

(3:49 PM)

The strangest thing about the KC sports scene is that their columnists (Posnanski and Whitlock) have been significantly better than the teams for something like 8 years. It's bizarre.

Smash Williams

Do you think your ESPN the Mag column could have generated enough readers to allow NBC to bring me back for my third senior year next season?

Bill Simmons

(3:52 PM)

Smash, you're headed for a bad injury or expulsion from school or something - they set it up too blatantly with the ripoff of the recruiting scene in "All The Right Moves" where Cruise dismisses the recruiter because he doesn't think the school is good enough for him. I love Friday Night Lights, but they have taken pieces from every football movie ever made I think.

John (Berkeley, CA)

What's your top five for celebrity-athlete look-alikes? I know you like Mike Tomlin and Omar Epps, but I say Will Smith and Robert Horry are number one, no question.

Bill Simmons

(3:54 PM)

Glad you brought this up - I broached this in an NFL column last month and got a ton of feedback on it. Some classics courtesy of the readers...

Bill Simmons

(3:55 PM)

Bill Simmons

(3:55 PM)

Tim : Findlay

Are you worried at all about the week 14 Steelers game? Would you say that they are the only team left capable of beating the Patriots?

Bill Simmons

(3:57 PM)

Extremely worried - talked about it with Sal in today's podcast. The Steelers have physical corners to mess with Moss; they have the blitzing schemes; and they have the quick/shifty RB like Westbrook. And their QB can make plays. The good news is that the Pats have owned the Steelers for this entire decade.

Derek (Boston)

Bill, its almost been hours do you need to pee yet?

Bill Simmons

(3:57 PM)

Are you kidding? My house has wireless. Let's just say that history was made during this chat.

Mike and the Maddog

Bill when are you going to come back on our show. Our ratings will go through the roof!!!

Bill Simmons

(3:58 PM)

I'm not allowed.

Mike (Seattle)

Have to lobby for Seattle as the most totured sports city. We've won ONE championship 28 years ago (the year before most people thing the NBA was born). Every team threatens to move. The refs in the '93 Western Conference Finals, the refs in Super Bowl XL, we win 116 games in a season but can't get to the World Series. Griffey, A-Rod,Randy Johnson,Kemp all leave in their prime. Philly's got nothing on us!

Bill Simmons

(3:59 PM)

It's a valid lobby except you don't have a hockey team - which is funny because every American city now has a hockey team except Seattle. You're right there in the "3 teams or more" argument, although you're trailing Cleveland.

Jeff (Manalapan, NJ)

Not allowed back on Mike and the Maddog!?!?

Bill Simmons

(4:00 PM)

No ESPN'ers are allowed...

Chris (Columbus, OH)

I remember you writing a few months back that Alton from RW/RR Challenge is one of the most competitive/fierce athletes of our time....I know you probably don't watch Survivor, but have you heard of or accidentally caught a glimpse of the Gravedigger James from this season? I think he could step in for Dwight Freeney and immediately switch the balance of power from the Pats to the Colts. He is a force to be reckoned with. Anyways, do you think you'll ever see an athlete make the jump from reality television to pro sports during your lifetime? How can a pro scout not see these guys when they sit down to watch TV at night???

Bill Simmons

(4:01 PM)

I quit on Survivor midway thru last season... I just felt like it had gone as far as it could go for me. We had n6 quality years together, that's as much as you could ever ask from a TV show.

Bill Simmons

(4:05 PM)

Todd (Columbus)

You mentioned to Sports Gal pre-NBA Draft that if the C's got the 1 or 2 pick, you'd have to move back to Beantown. Now you have the Big 3, a MUCH better scenario? You're looking for houses right?

Bill Simmons

(4:06 PM)

I am trerrified to move back - the moment it happens, everything will turn in Boston and we'll stop winning. So I'm staying here until things change.

Marketing Director at Porchpies.com

This portion of the chat has been brought to you by porchpies.com...featuring the SG endorsed buttermilk pie...for the lactose intollerant pie fans, we are now featuring the pinnapple shake pie! Thanks for stopping by!!!

Bill Simmons

(4:08 PM)

Say what you want about me, but I have never, ever, EVER pimped something that wasn't good. Which reminds me, the best donuts in LA are at the corner of New Hampshire and 3rd St. - a place called California Donuts. Slightly sketchy at night but definitely worth it - the greatest apple fritter donuts ever made.

Mike (Minny)

You have always expressed a desire to be a GM in the NBA, so here's your chance...give me an outline on how to fix the Wolves, and I will pass it on to McHale. If I was you, I wouldn't treat this as a joke, judging by all of his moves, this is completely possible!!!

Bill Simmons

(4:10 PM)

Hold on, I have to look at their cap situation...

Bill Simmons

(4:14 PM)

That's a tough one - they don't really have much to trade. The only deal I could see making sense for them is Ratliff, Antoine Walker and Telfair to the Knicks for Marbury because he'd almost definitely insure that they ended up with the worst record in the league, and when he comes off in 2009, they'd be $20 million under the cap... and there's the 5% chance he could be rejuvenated on a bad team.

Kelvin (Dayton)

PLEASE tell me this chat isn't going to end up on Insider when its over like your other work. As a broke fan, I HATE not being able to look back at your work.

Bill Simmons

(4:15 PM)

I will take great pains to make sure that doesn't happen.

Aaron (Warwick, RI)

So do the Pats sign Moss to a multi-year contract or have to slap him with the franchise tag?

Bill Simmons

(4:17 PM)

If I had to bet on it, I'd say that he's one and done - they caught him at the perfect point - he's playing for a new contract, he's getting a ton of attention, he loves playing on a great team and playing with Brady... the way it's turned out, it's been like a phenomenal run at a blackjack table. After the season, I think they should just color up, take their money and wish him the best.

Bill Simmons

(4:17 PM)

Unless he's willing to play for lkess than he's worth.

Ricky Williams (Miami)

Sweet. Another paid vacation. Wanna blaze?

Vev (Atlanta, GA)

Do you have something against us women sports lovers since you haven't given us much print on answering our questions?

Bill Simmons

(4:19 PM)

I don't even look at the names, just the questions. Please, more female questions!

Kurt: (Arlington, VA)

How many NFL teams could Shane Falco start for right now?

Bill Simmons

(4:20 PM)

Miami, Oakland, KC, Minnesota, Carolina, San Fran...

Kate (New Jersey)

Are the NY Giants ever going to win a Super Bowl with Eli as quarterback?

Bill Simmons

(4:22 PM)

I can't see it. Even if they got a No. 1 or No.2 seed, he'd have to play 3 good games in a row and it appears as if he's incapable of doing so, right? I love the way it worked out - he could have been just as inconsistent as Phil Rivers in San Diego, and instead, he pouted his way to the Giants and he's getting raked over the coals. Meanwhile, nobody cares that Phil Rivers is just as shaky.

Clinton (Indianapolis)

Bill, what do you think the spread's going to be for the Pats-Jets game? If gambling were legal, that is?

Bill Simmons

(4:23 PM)

33

'Sheed's Shadow (Portland, OR)

Thanks for making this day the most unproductive day at work ever, Billy Goat. For that, I'm donating to the Jimmy V Foundation so I can feel decent about myself at the end of the day. There's no turning back now...to the record and beyond!

Bill Simmons

(4:23 PM)

Excellent! More donations! Even $5 helps...

Matt (South Pasadena, CA)

Bill, thoughts on Guitar Hero?

Bill Simmons

(4:25 PM)

i know I'm getting old because I have no thoughts at all on Guitar Hero or Harry Potter. I was at a friend's house for Thanksgiving where they were playing Guitar Hero and I was completely flabbergasted by the whole thing. It's like they're now creating games specifically for little kids and stoned college kids.

Bill Simmons

(4:25 PM)

I am hip on the Wii, however - now that's a cool game.

Dan Benz (Williamstown, MA)

You mentioned in an article once that Holy Cross should consider joining the NESCAC, but as a student of Williams College I was just wondering if you'd also be okay with the fact that they'd be finishing no better than fifth every year? P.S. I know you're familiar somewhat with NESCAC schools so maybe you can answer this for me--there are girls here right? I've been here three years and I'd just like to see one before my senior year.

Bill Simmons

(4:26 PM)

I am totally fine with HC being in the NESCAC - that's where we belong. We are fooling ourselves and I am not giving money to the school again until they address it.

Ed (Las Vegas)

What's Sarah Silverman like on football Sundays?

Bill Simmons

(4:27 PM)

Disinterested.

Beau (Denver)

Guitar Hero is the Tecmo Bowl and Mario Kart of a whole new generation. Slash is the new Bo Jackson

Bill Simmons

(4:28 PM)

I agree. I feel left out. Klosterman wrote a really good piece about the Harry Potter generation 2 issues ago, I agreed with everything.

Seven (NY, NY)

When are you going to bring back the Greatest Sports Movies columns? Ratings be damned, they represent some of your best work. Like the Wire, quality is more important than ratings.

Bill Simmons

(4:31 PM)

I've been thinking of bringing it back... would anyone read them though? I was watching Bad News Bears in Breaking Training the other day and thinking that A) there isn't a more quintessential dopey late-70's movie, B.) it's still one of the best 20 sports movies ever, C.) the way they rig the lineups so Kelly Leak bats 3 times in the span of about 10 outs is one of the greatest sports movie glitches ever.

Bill Simmons

(4:31 PM)

I also have a ton of thoughts on Teen Wolf that need to be unleashed.

Bill Simmons

(4:33 PM)

Speaking of cable movies, I was watching School Ties last night for the first time in forever - how bad was the "he said/he said" cheating ending. Instead of having the class vote for which guy cheated (Damon or Fraser), how did that movie not end with a climactic football game where the team chose between them and the Jewish QB led them to glory? I feel like they need to do that movie over again.

Bill Simmons

(4:34 PM)

That's also the most jarring cable movie for racial slurs with the possible exception of "48 Hours."

Craig (Bloomington, IN)

You have MORE thoughts on Teen Wolf? How is that possible?

Bill Simmons

(4:35 PM)

Oh, i have more thoughts! I also need to delve into "Victory" more than just for 300 words - that movie demands a 2500-word column.

Kevin: (Flint, MI)

If all the time and energy used for Fantasy Football was devoted to something else, what could be accomplished? Cure cancer?

Bill Simmons

(4:36 PM)

We could definitely build an express train from LA to Vegas.

Tom (Santa Monica, CA

What five non-reality shows are your favorites right now?

Bill Simmons

(4:37 PM)

My Dad visited this week for his birthday and we watched "The Unit" last night - apparently this is his favorite show and I had no idea. Anyway, I really liked it. I am adding it to the Tivo Pass. Can't say the same for "Cane" which followed "The Unit" - it's always fun when someone willfully leaves a great TV show, then comes back a few years later for a crappy one.

Bill Simmons

(4:38 PM)

Bill Simmons

(4:39 PM)

I liked Tell Me You Love Me because they had the greatest "crazy female character" ever - the one who couldn't stick to a single boyfriend. She wasn't over the top crazy but subtly crazy, like a combination of every nightmare girlfriend you ever dated when you were 25 (and that you WILL date when you turn 25).

Mike (ct)

no love for entourage. say it ain't so bill

Bill Simmons

(4:40 PM)

I packed it in this year... sorry. Couldn't take it anymore.

Derek (Boston)

Are you going to start watching 24 again? Tony's back!

Bill Simmons

(4:41 PM)

Of course! I think "24" is like an NFL team - you'll have some 12-4 seasons and some 2-14 seasons and some 8-8 seasons. Last year was an 0-16 season. Doesn't mean it can't bounce back.

John (NY, NY)

I don't know about Victory, but the ending of Tin Cup and what the viewer's liking of it says about them as a person EASILY deserves 2500 words.

don draper (nyc)

why no love for mad men?

Bill Simmons

(4:43 PM)

Here's why: Because I didn't get enough good feedback on it until it had been on for a few weeks, and by that time, there was no way to catch up... and, of course, in AMC's infinite wisdom, they didn't put the first few episodes On-Demand so people like me could catch up. Nicely done, AMC! Way to cost yourselves about a million viewers!

JJ, seattle

Hey, you're the other one that watches "Tell Me..." Which makes me sicker -- the fact that I tuned in for the heavy soft-core porn, or the fact that I find the couple not having sex to be the most interesting?

Bill Simmons

(4:45 PM)

Nope - ESPN.com editor Mike Philbrick watches it. And so does my Mom, which is deeply disturbing, believe me, I know. But Mike and I both thought the couple who didn't have sex wasn't having sex because the guy liked young girls... so it was disappointing when it turned out that they just needed to figure out a way to, um, well, there's no way to write about what happened in the ending. Let's just say that they were better singles players than doubles players.

Bill Simmons

(4:46 PM)

Here was Mike's take on the last show (he hated how everything was neatly resolved): "I would have preferred if all the couples were eating onion rings and they just faded to black."

Suns Fan (Phoenix)

Bill, I like you a lot, but if you were my GM I would probably get arrested trying to exact revenge against you. I'm kidding, of course, but I think you're undervaluing Amare just a little bit. He's not top 5, but Camby and Najera?

Bill Simmons

(4:48 PM)

Camby has the single best contract in the league - 3 years remaining at less than $25 million total - and Najera expires after the season, so financially, that trade really helps them down the road and allows them to keep Marion next season. Remember, Sarver won't pay the tax.

Brett (North Caldwell, NJ)

What did you think of the end of Californication? I liked the show better when Hank was just getting laid all the time. Now that he is back with the ex, they killed their two best sub-plots- Hank getting laid a lot and Hank trying to get his ex wife back. What is left for season 2?

Bill Simmons

(4:50 PM)

I hated the very ending to the last show but really liked the first 2 shows and the last few shows - the middle was pretty bad. Duchovny might be the most underrated actor in Hollywood - he's really good in a movie called "The TV Set," which is a little flawed by worth renting if you like Hollywood stuff.

Ryan (Bakersfield, CA)

Just a note - sent all my friends with children a link to your piece on taking your daughter to the basketball game, and they all could relate. But you left out the fourteen trips to the bathroom. How did you pull that off? Especially after a large Sprite.

Bill Simmons

(4:51 PM)

Well thank you. Here's the amazing thing about that game - no diaper changes in 4 hours. Although she probably needed one after 2. She was a trooper, she grinded it out!

Josh

Doc was on ESPN radio this afternoon and he said that he is working on the minutes that KG, Paul and Ray are playing. He said that they keep getting in odd ball games that make their minutes go up. Then he said that his bench is pretty good, but that the only other player on the team that gets plays called for them is Rajon. Your thoughts?

Bill Simmons

(4:54 PM)

I don't want to be the turd in the punch bowl during an 11-2 season, I'm not touching that one. I would just rather see this team peaking in May and June than November, and the problem with this season has been that the three stars and the coach all have something to prove, so they've been playing each game like it's a playoff game. Meanwhile, the Spurs are on cruise control and won't break a sweat until March. Just look at the minutes for the top players on the top 7 teams. Go ahead, look. What team's top-3 is abnormally high?

Brian (Marietta, GA)

Okay, I'm in for $25. Seems like a fair trade. Thanks for all the columns.

Bill Simmons

(4:55 PM)

Good job Brian! Thanks.

Tim (Munroe Falls, Ohio)

Could you please tell ESPN classic to stop the current coverage of the Cavs/Bulls game from '88? Really haven't we suffered enough?

Bob (Green Bay)

Is it just me being a Green Bay fan or do they possibly have the best shot at New England. I see them as having two physical corners (Harris always played Moss pretty well when he was in Minnesota). They also have the front 7 to get to Brady and keep pressure on him. And they also have enough offense to put points on the board. Not that they are a better team, but I think they have as good a shot as anyone.

Bill Simmons

(4:56 PM)

And you know they'd get all the calls...

Hank Steinbrenner (NY, NY)

If they could somehow edit Jennifer Love Hewitt into Tommy Boy, any chance they'd rename it after me?

OJ (Las Vegas jail)

Bill.....whats your one favorite piece of sports memorabilia you have?

Bill Simmons

(4:59 PM)

I love everything about this question. Anyway, I think the single coolest thing I own is the actual No. 5 envelope and the Celtics logo that was inside it from the 2007 NBA Lottery - I'd rank this at the top only because it's the only one of its kind.

Bill Simmons

(4:59 PM)

ESPN researcher Peter Newman snagged it for me right after the draft and I am forever grateful, especially because things turned out OK in the end. I have some neat things but that's the coolest one.

Fatman (Union City, CA)

My buddy and I have a bet for a hundred bucks to see if you could get you to answer a question with the word "chaloobas" in it. The winner will give half to the Jimmy V Foundation. Deal?

Bill Simmons

(5:00 PM)

Deal!

Don, Perry and Mole, LA

Can I sue the Celtics for stealing 'The Big Three'?

Bill Simmons

(5:01 PM)

You guys have a valid case.

Bill Simmons

(5:01 PM)

You guys have a valid case.

Bill Simmons

(5:01 PM)

You guys have a valid case.

Bill Simmons

(5:02 PM)

We're at the 5-hour mark - 5:00pm on the East Coast. Come on, give a little to the Jimmy V Foundation! I'm like Jerry Lewis on Labor Day at 5:00pm right now, i'm sweating, I can't see straight and I'm about to start crying for no reason.

Ben Zeman, Brooklyn

What is the deal with Kornheiser and Jaws refusing to pick games that they are calling? All I can imagine is that they think they will somehow have an affect on the outcome. I can understand that they think they are important, but this is not Allen Greenspan speaking to investment strategies or currency valuation.

Bill Simmons

(5:04 PM)

This one has always bothered me - are we supposed to think that their integrity will be compromised during the game or something? And if so, who cares? They're announcers!

Bill Simmons

(5:05 PM)

Isn't it far worse than Tom Jackson has been picking the Broncos for 20 years straight, or that Collinsworth always talks himself into the Bengals?

Mark (Madison, WI)

You once said that shows like Rescue Me and Curb have an advantage being on channels that allow for cursing. I always think about what Lost would be like with that ability. I mean, imagine: "What the eff was that?!" "Eff you Sawyer!" and of course: "Where the eff are we?!!!"

Bill Simmons

(5:06 PM)

And don't forget the partial nudity...

Erin Andrews (Bristol, CT)

Do you get as many bad questions as I get bad pick-up lines?

Bill Simmons

(5:06 PM)

and then some

Chris-CT

Bill, great call on Dwight Howard in your fantasy basketball column. I picked him with the 7th pick in the first round and couldn't be happier! Do you have any "buy low" options you are looking at right now?

Bill Simmons

(5:07 PM)

I wish you had asked me this a week ago - I loved Jamario Moon, Andray Blatche and Antonio Daniels. The fantasy guy to watch right now is Louis Williams, who's worth picking up if you have a deep bench.

Bill Simmons

(5:08 PM)

Bill Simmons

(5:08 PM)

he also has one of the most entertaining games in the league - it's unclear if anyone can guard him.

BW (Denver)

What would it take to get you on Around the Horn? Maybe a pledge drive for the Jimmy V Foundation? I'm in for $20!

Bill Simmons

(5:09 PM)

Never.

Brian (Charlotte, NC)

Whats your best guess for the graduation gift that Nicholson gave Damon in The Departed?

Bill Simmons

(5:10 PM)

I think it was the 41-cent stamp that Nicholson used for the performance in that movie. All due respect to Jack, but we can all agree on this one, right? He's the worst thing in that movie BY FAR.

Bill Simmons

(5:10 PM)

Sorry for the Caps, i got riled up.

Bill Simmons

(5:10 PM)

I watch that movie every time it's on cable - you can jump in at any point.

Emeka (Connecticut)

Bill, What did you major in college??

Bill Simmons

(5:11 PM)

Poly Sci. And you know what? I'd do it again. All the emails I received after panning the last 25 minutes of "No Country for Old Men" reminded me of why I never wanted to be an English major.

Trey - Detroit, MI.

As the father of a two year old girl, I was wondering...Would you rather that your daughter eventually date someone from the NBA, NHL, NFL or MLB?

Bill Simmons

(5:12 PM)

I'd go with hockey - they have the nicest guys and I'd be fired up if my daughter ever dated a Canadian or an Australian.

Kevin (Charlotte, NC)

If you were Stern, wouldn't you let every All-Star select a charity; and then if their team wins, their charity gets $100,000. That way the players would play hard because they would get blasted if they didn't, and it would be a great PR move for the NBA. You could even show the players giving the check to their organization and spin it into a commercial. I mean, doesn't the NBA have a ton of money from the Knicks paying the luxury tax for like the past decade?

Bill Simmons

(5:14 PM)

I like it. Also like the idea of Americans vs. Foreigners, and I like the idea of every All-Star putting up $100K of their own money in the game. These guys bet that much on a 3-hour flight for a poker game, they couldn't do it for the All-Star Game?

Bill Simmons

(5:14 PM)

I like it. Also like the idea of Americans vs. Foreigners, and I like the idea of every All-Star putting up $100K of their own money in the game. These guys bet that much on a 3-hour flight for a poker game, they couldn't do it for the All-Star Game?

Alex (Pittsburgh)

When you answer a question, o you actually ave them all in front of you to choose from, or do you take what comes next like rapid fire, or are there people screening for you?

Bill Simmons

(5:15 PM)

I usually grab whatever is in the first 10 questions I see after the page refreshes, there's usuually one good one that I can go with

Eric (Boston)

Is there anyone you have gotten a change to watch this year on college bball that has really blown you away (a la Durant last year where it is necessary to make a point of watching all his team's games for the rest of the year)?

Bill Simmons

(5:17 PM)

i'm definitely intrigued by Derrick Rose - don't love his demeanor, but he has the innate point guard gene and he's a superb, superb passer - maybe the best college passer at that position since Kenny Anderson (back when Kenny was good). So I want to watch him a few more times but we haven't entered man-crush territory or anything.

Colton (NY, NY)

Bill you mentioned you saw Bee Movie, thoughts? I went in expecting it to be much funnier and have that classic Seinfeld humor, turns out it was horrendous and I laughed out loud once the entire movie. I think it's safe to say that Larry David was the funny creative force behind Seinfeld. Do you agree?

Bill Simmons

(5:19 PM)

I wouldn't go that far but you're right on the lack of laughs and Seinfeld's voice was tough to take for that long. On the other hand, my kid absolutely loved it and it's a kids movie. But I thought Ratatouille was significantly better. My God, how did I get here? Just shoot me.

Bill (Cleveland, OH)

Ever considered Belichick intentionally got caught for the spygate thing? I can totally see him being somewhat stumped on what he could do to take his team to the next level, so he decided to give them something to make them feel slighted so they would be extra motivated.

Bill Simmons

(5:20 PM)

People keep asking me this - I just don't see it, he cares too much about his place in history. It's too improbable.

Hank, Ann Arbor

Whos hotter so far on season two: Julie Taylor or her mom? and what is the sports comparison of julies ridiculous increase in hotness from season one??

Bill Simmons

(5:20 PM)

There was no increase - they just unleashed her this season. Last year, they hid her behind baggy sweaters and had her holding books in front of her chest the whole time because she's like 15 in real life.

Bill Simmons

(5:21 PM)

Then NBC gave the "sex it up!' edict and she was, um, unleashed.

John (RI)

Twins are about to trade Garza and Bartlett to TB for Delmon Young. Does this open a chance for the Sox to put a package together for Santana centered around Crisp, Lowrie and Lester?

Bill Simmons

(5:22 PM)

Intriguing. I love that trade for the Twins, Delmon Young has a chance to be great. yeah, that seems like the first of a multi-deal sequence, right? I just loved the fact that Tampa dropped the "Devi" this winter.

Bill Simmons

(5:22 PM)

"The Tampa Bay Rays." If that's not the worst sports name ever, it's definitely in the top-3.

Aaron (Cville)

The secret upside of the writers strike: SNL might be forced to show some good older episodes that we can't see any more now that E! has a monopoly on the reruns and only shows ones hosted by Lindsay Lohan or Britney Spears.

Bill Simmons

(5:24 PM)

Yeah, it took the networks about 4 weeks to figure out that they should be using this time as a way to spruce up their late night shows instead of just showing re-runs - SNL did a Thanksgiving special that was really funny, and now, Leno is showing vintage shows. They should be running clip shows every night on every late night show.

Bruce (Lansing, MI)

Worst sports name ever? How about the Utah Jazz?

Josh, NY

The Young for Garza trade contradicts all of the Santana talks. Minnesota gets their outfielder and loses a starter. Santana isn't going anywhere!

Bill Simmons

(5:27 PM)

Not true - if they turned Santana into 2 young starters, that replaces Garza AND Johan

Elly, St Louis

Ric Flair is rumored to be actually retiring, culminating in his final match at Wrestlemania. Who would you like to see him wrestle in his last match?

Bill Simmons

(5:27 PM)

Phil Mickelson - Battle of the Man Boobs

Baby Simmons (Los Angeles, CA)

Just want to point out that the girl who plays Julie Taylor is closer in age to me than she is to you. Stop being the creepy dad from American Beauty!

Bill Simmons

(5:28 PM)

No kidding. That's why I was treading lightly...

John (Mishawaka, IN)

READ ME!! Thoughts and prayers for everyone who benefits from the work of the Jimmy V Foundation...nice work Sports Guy! On a side note: When complaining to friends about how many hours you had to work, what is the appropriate protocol for accurately determining the length of time you actually worked? In my opinion, the clock starts when I finally decide to stop hitting the snooze button and doesn't stop until I nail a Reggie Miller-esque fade-away three with my dress socks touching nothing but the bottom of the hamper...

Bill Simmons

(5:29 PM)

I'd say it stretches from the moment you leave the house to the moment you return home.

Michael (Philly)

Where does Beno Udrih dropping 27 on the Spurs rank on the least predictable vengance scale? FYI - this is a great thing you are doing for a great foundation. You helped me do three things today and I had a full day........

Bill Simmons

(5:29 PM)

It's a 0.2 - one notch above OJ's search for the real killers.

Answer just one question

Who is the greatest athelete you have seen in your lifetime?

Bill Simmons

(5:30 PM)

In person? Bo Jackson. I saw him score standing up on a short fly ball to left field once. And the throw was on target.

Billy King (Philadelphia,PA)

Assuming I trade Andre Miller to Cleveland for Varejao, what would be a good deal for him? Should I start out at 9 million per and only go as high as 10?

Bill Simmons

(5:31 PM)

No Billy! No! Close the ESPN.com trade checker! CLOSE IT NOW!!!

Will (DC)

Bill, isn't it a little unfair that the Pats get raked through the mud over "spygate" but then NBC airs Brady's line calls nonstop throughout the Philly game?

Bill Simmons

(5:31 PM)

What, you didn't think it was fair that everyone in the country now knows what the "Omaha" audible means?

Joe (Cleveland)

How about a music question, any thoughts on best 2007 releases?Radiohead, Les Savy Fav, Sunset Rubdown, Animal Collective, Arcade Fire? I know you like good music, and there has been a lot lately.

Bill Simmons

(5:34 PM)

I am about 6 weeks behind on the music releases because we just had a kid. But go to ITunes, go to the I-Mix search and put in "Sports Guy 2007" for my favorite songs from the first 9 months

Josh Rollins (Reynoldsburg, OH)

Which is harder to believe? Mark Wahlberg in "Boogie Nights" or Charlie Weiss finishing his contract with Notre Dame?

Bill Simmons

(5:35 PM)

I can't answer that, but I did want to mention something: I read recently that A.) Wahlberg got that part only after Leo DiCaprio turned it down to take the Titanic, and B.) Leo said 7 years later that it was the biggest mistake of his career.

Bill Simmons

(5:35 PM)

So here's my question...

Bill Simmons

(5:36 PM)

Is it a better movie with Leo? Somehow I can't see him as Dirk Diggler, but I never would have imagined him as a Massachusetts street tough in the Departed either.

Bill Simmons

(5:36 PM)

It's the greatest movie "What if" other than "What if Robin Williams hadn't backed out of the role of the Duke in Midnight Run at the last second?"

Bob (Holy Cross)

Please just explain to me the rationale of HC going division 3. Although they are not nationally competitive now atleast they are somewhat relevant. They have 3 nationally televised games this year (One on ESPN 2 and two on ESPNU), and most likely will have a fourth in the Patriot League Championsihp. In addition they have a legit shot of making the NCAA tournament and possibly pulling off an upset just like Patriot League Rival Bucknell did 3 years ago. Atleast now they have a chance of becoming nationally relevant. If they were relegated to D3 they would fade into obscurity and NO ONE would care about them even if they won the National Championship. Case and point, name last years D3 National Champion.

Bill Simmons

(5:39 PM)

Because HC is in no man's land - they can't get Ivy League kids, but they're too good academically to sneak in the types of kids that a school like BC can sneak in. So what's the ultimate goal? I'd rather see them completely embrace academics and become a NESCAC school and compete there.

Travis (Arlington, VA)

Pick one NBA player from each of the last five decades to make the all-time greatest lineup.

Bill Simmons

(5:39 PM)

Oscar Kareem Bird MJ Duncan

Chazz Chester

Is the boogie nights question a diss on Marky Mark? I think he's a great actor. Him and Baldwin were great in the departed, weren't they? Boogie nights would have to be worse with Leo, right?

Bill Simmons

(5:41 PM)

Not at all, I thought he was really good in Boogie Nights; in fact, I loved him in Boogie Nights. I just think Leo is the best under-35 actor we have right now. Does this mean he makes that a better movie? I don't know.

Bill Simmons

(5:41 PM)

Not at all, I thought he was really good in Boogie Nights; in fact, I loved him in Boogie Nights. I just think Leo is the best under-35 actor we have right now. Does this mean he makes that a better movie? I don't know.

Ricky, Sherman Oaks

As you may be seeing spots or worse at this point, i'd like to remind you of your promise to devote a section of your mailbag to the "What are the 10 greatest things about living in LA" question. We need this info!

Bill Simmons

(5:41 PM)

I won't forget...

Dan (Vegas)

No Sports Gal takeover as promised? Would that tarnish the marathon if you took a break?

Bill Simmons

(5:41 PM)

yeah, I think it would...

Justin K (Kansas State)

Beat Rob Neyer by postin one of my comments. Also, you left Michael Beasley off you list.

Bill Simmons

(5:42 PM)

I haven't seen him yet - I'm both excited and frightened to see "The Next Derrick Coleman."

Eric (Indianapolis, IN)

You like Leo over Ed Norton and Christian Bale? Norton's my favorite but Bale is making a really strong run right now too.

Bill Simmons

(5:45 PM)

Leo is the best - that's why he regrets Titanic, because he knows it hurt him long-term in terms of people taking him seriously. I don't think there's another American actor who could have pulled off Blood Diamond like he did. I'd put Bale second, Norton 3rd and Damon 4th if it was an under-40 question.

Elias (Tartu, Estonia)

Don't you think that Kerr couldn't trade Amare for Camby because of the significant age difference? Even if he needs to improve at defense Amare is much more valuable than a 33 year old Camby...

Bill Simmons

(5:46 PM)

Here's the catch: They only have a few years left with Nash. They need to win a title within the next 2-3 years. And they're almost better off starting over and having everyone get old at once because they'll have cap space and everyone wants to play there.

Josh (Portland, OR)

Do you think Matt Damon and Leo D. could have switched roles in The Departed?

Bill Simmons

(5:46 PM)

I do, and they talked about it supposedly before the movie. It worked out the right way though.

Vishal (Cleveland,Ohio)

Now that you think about it, was J.D. Drew's grand slam REALLY worth 14 million dollars?

Bill Simmons

(5:47 PM)

And then some

George (Chicago)

I'm doing my first Vegas trip with a few buddies. Any suggestions on what to play besides Blackjack, Craps, and the Sportsbook? I'm thinking I need another game. Three card poker? Let it ride?

Bill Simmons

(5:49 PM)

Stick with those 3 things, don't get crazy, keep your wallet in your front pocket, don't drunk-gamble if you're losing and feel like you can't win, and get up if you don't like your dealer.

Drew (Braintree, MA)

THIS IS IT..Clocks running down and your trailing by one... 1. who do you want taking that shot for you out of today's NBA players... 2. Other then MJ what player either past or present do you want shooting it

Bill Simmons

(5:53 PM)

Ricky, Sherman Oaks

I think it was you who noted that Kobe's teammates are significantly better than what MJ was working with towards the end of his run with the Bulls. What is the single greatest reason that Kobe simply cannot do what MJ did? Same drive, same passion, same vicious thirst to win, and both great offensive and defensive players. What is it?!?

Bill Simmons

(5:54 PM)

That's not what I said exactly - I mentioned that, during the '98 playoffs, when Rodman was basically washed up and Pippen was completely hampered by a bad back, MJ's supporting cast wasn't as good as the one Kobe has right now. The problem is that there's only one MJ - he's the greatest ever. Kobe isn't as talented and he doesn't have the will to dominate that MJ had.

Zach (San Diego)

As I was reading the link about The Hills that you posted, The Soup was showing a clip of the Hills girls at the Big Wang with Whitney's trainer. Much to my delight they were showing how much the dude's hair had grown from "earlier" in they day. Then they showed another clip that was supposed to happen after the bar scene and the guys hair was short again. Did the producers just say eff it this season, or were we just not paying close enough attention before?

Bill Simmons

(5:57 PM)

The Hills is completely scripted. Everyone in LA knows this. For instance, Heidi doesn't even really work at her company - they use her to promote it and give her a fake office, she doesn't do anything. And Brody and Spencer never "broke up" as friends. It's all fake. The producers dictate everything. Hate to break it to you.

Luke, Las Vegas

More advice for the first time Vegas traveler. Never, never pay for drinks if you are in a casino. Put $1 in the video poker machine at the bar and play $.25 a hand for comp drinks. Never, never pay for drinks. And don't even look at the three-card poker table or the big wheel. Stick with the big three.

DJ (ny,ny)

Bill Simmons

(5:59 PM)

I actually know the answer to this - like, 14 years ago, David Spade was doing a "hollywood Minute" and showed a picture of Eddie, then said, "look, kids, it's a falling star!" Eddie happened to be watching and washed his hands of the show - even refused to go the reunion shows.

Bill Simmons

(6:00 PM)

In his defense, he singlehandedly saved the show from getting cancelled in the early-80's.

Bo (Atlanta, GA)

How would you rank the performances of the principal and supporting actors in the Departed? I think attempting to rank them underscores how absurdly good everyone was. Here's mine: 1. Damon. Slightest of edges over . . . 2. DiCaprio. 3. Baldwin. Almost stole the movie. 4. Wahlberg. Hysterical. 5. Anderson. Career-making, right? I mean, "Fresh Air" just interviewed him. 6. Farmiga. Can't decide how pretty she is, but couldn't take my eyes off of her. 7. Sheen. Credible if uninspired? 8. Nicholson. If he did mail it in, he must have used the old 39 cent stamp, because it never arrived.

Bill Simmons

(6:02 PM)

I'd go... DiCaprio, Wahlberg, Baldwin, Damon, the girl... thought Sheen was shaky and Jack was simply awful. It's really too bad. I don't know who would have been perfect for that role, but he was definitely the wrong guy at the wrong point of his career.

Joe (Austin TX)

I kid you not - I bought Weinreb's book when you first mentioned it 4 hours ago and it was ranked 37,000+ on Amazon... now... ranked 9,000... that guy owes you...

Bill Simmons

(6:04 PM)

More people should get it than that... that's barely a dent in Amazon, it only takes a couple 100 sales in one day to crack the top-10. Here's the link.

Bill Simmons

(6:04 PM)

Chris (Medford, MA)

Did you see "Gone Baby Gone"? I love how Affleck put real Dorchester people in the film. You can not find extras that are that ugly/trashy.

Bill Simmons

(6:06 PM)

That was my favorite part of the movie - he nailed the seedy side of outer Boston and the Dottie character alone made it a must-see for anyone from back home. Dottie killed me. I really liked the movie except that Morgan Freeman would never be a high-level police anything in Boston in a million years, it would never happen.

Bill Simmons

(6:06 PM)

I also don't know if I liked the ending... need to see it again on cable before I decide.

Conor Littleton, Colorado

Why is nobody talking about sports? COME ON this is ESPN.com

Bill Simmons

(6:07 PM)

yeah, come on people!

Proch (Lowell, MA)

Bill, could you offer an alternative - NBA free - page for those fans of yours that couldn't be less interested in pro hoops? An NBA filter for this chat would be great too. thanks

Bill Simmons

(6:07 PM)

i can't win...

Todd (Melbourne,FL)

Tell me Bill, who is the most overrated actor/actress of the last 20 years? I think Jodie Foster is WAY over hyped. She is like watching a cardboard cut out act.

Bill Simmons

(6:08 PM)

She would be my pick as well - either her or Melanie Griffith.

Douglas

I've already tried to pledge $1/hour and $2 per hour of the chat and you didn't post my question. Now i'm offering $3. How high do i need to go to see my question on the interwebs?

Bill Simmons

(6:10 PM)

Done. Come on, 30 minutes to go - can the people who are repeatedly posting the same questions please stop, I can't find the good ones.

Work Sucks

Is this chat marathon the closest thing you've had to an 8 hour work day in your life? Don't forget to take a week off to recouperate.

Bill Simmons

(6:12 PM)

"Recouperate?" Did you go to BC?

Larry (chicago)

Wouldn't Mark Cuban owning the Cubs be great for the game? Why is baseball against this?

Bill Simmons

(6:13 PM)

It's the natural move for him - he's already experienced the joy of owning his own NBA team, now he has a chance to give Chicago a WS title with the Cubs. Isn't that the holy grail for a sports owner?

Bill Simmons

(6:13 PM)

I'm trying to think if there would be a better team to own if they won a title...

Peter (Norwood, NJ)

Who would you rank as the most over-rated new actress? I say Maggie Gyllenhal

Bill Simmons

(6:14 PM)

I say Kirsten Dunst.

Jeff (Champaign, IL)

You finally get your dream GM job in the NBA, you're looking to pick up an elite young point guard. Who do you pick Chris Paul or Deron Williams?

Bill Simmons

(6:14 PM)

Chris Paul. Although that's turning into a great rivalry.

Rick (Boston)

I have taken 2 poops during your chat, but taken the laptop in the bathroom both times. Just thought you should know this is must see chatting.

Bill Simmons

(6:15 PM)

Rick, I'm honored, thank you and thanks to your bowels.

Howard (Spokane)

You and Stoner at San Diego for Zags vs. San Diego (Feb 18)...With Heytvelt back you could kill us with the Mushroom jokes. Make it happen ESPN

Bill Simmons

(6:16 PM)

Can't do that one because it's NBA AS Weekend but I really want to do a St. Mary's game, supposedly their Australian point guard is amazing. Patrick Mills? I think that's his name.

Blair (Waco, TX)

Thoughts on Dennis Miller's new show on Verses? Assuming you've seen it since Schilling was his first guest. I'm guessing he's breaking the writers strike - is he just not part of the union or does he just write all of his own material? Folks in L.A. upset at this?

Bill Simmons

(6:18 PM)

That's a great question. Not sure of the answer there... I find it hard to believe that Miller isn't in the Writer's Guild and even harder to believe that his monologue is ad-libbed. Anyway, I saw the first show and thought he seemed extremely rusty...

Geoff (DC)

I think the Wizards scene has to be studied intently for a year or so (beat writers, Gil blog, games, Eddie Jordan press conferences, etc) to understand why many logical ESPN suggestions don't really apply. I think Gilbert is a great, truly underrated player (just look how much his teammates and former teammates love him... compare Larry Hughes's stats with him and Lebron), but even beyond that, he's completely untradeable because of our very peculiar, delicate team chemistry and the strange psychology of most of our players.

Bill Simmons

(6:18 PM)

OK, sure

Bill Simmons

(6:20 PM)

Sorry, looking for questions

Patrick(Alaska)

Who is winning? The Packers or the Cowboys?

Bill Simmons

(6:21 PM)

I'm picking Dallas -6.5 and so is the Sports Gal apparently...

Bill Simmons

(6:21 PM)

I'm tired of picking against Dallas at home when they seem to win every game there by 30 points.

Rob, Boston

Pick one to happen... Pats going 19-0 or the Celtics winning it all?

Bill Simmons

(6:22 PM)

I couldn't. I just couldn't pick that. It's like picking between parents if only one of them could live in the choice. I can't do it.

Chris (Pittsburgh, PA)

How can you promote Dave Dameshek's show? PIttsburgh fans are the most obnoxious thing on the planet. Really I moved here two years ago. Lemeiux is not only better than Gretzkey, but Bradshaw could have dominated Montana. I went to a Phillies/Pirates game a few years ago and somebody told me Ryan Howard's bat speed was two slow for the majors, he would never be as good as Brian Giles... and still sticks by it today. Those people shouldn't be allowed near a radio.

Bill Simmons

(6:23 PM)

You make some great points - I'm not sure I can disagree with any of them. Dave is the same guy who calls Ben Roethlisberger "Seven."

Julio (Los Angeles, CA)

What do you think of Adam Carolla's impression of you on his show?

Bill Simmons

(6:24 PM)

It's as terrible as every other impression he tries to do. Carolla is the anti-Rich Little.

nick, san francisco, ca

is san francisco easily the worst "big" city sports city?

Bill Simmons

(6:26 PM)

That's interesting, I never thought about that one... the big cities would ostensibly be San Fran, Boston, NYC, Philly, Chicago, Detroit, Dallas, Denver and Phoenix... we can't include LA because LA doesn't have an NFL team. (I'm sure I left someone out, my brain is fried.)

Bill Simmons

(6:28 PM)

Also, I'm counting San Jose and the SF hockey team. Anyway, I guess it would depend on your classification of "worst." Least successful? No, cuz they had the Niners in the 80's and 90's. Least passionate? I don't know, the Warriors crowds are great and so are the Giants crowds.

Bill Simmons

(6:29 PM)

I'd have to say Denver is the worst big sports city - seems like a gigantic bandwagon except for the Broncos.

Andy (Pittsburgh)

No Pittsburgh on the big sports city list? That's just ridiculous!

Bill Simmons

(6:29 PM)

No NBA team

Shaq Miami, FL

MIAMI how dare you forget miami!

Bill Simmons

(6:29 PM)

Whoops, we have our answer!

Andrew (Philly)

Two parter: What could the Sixers really get for Andre Miller and which team is a good match? Keep in mind Billy King is our GM...

Bill Simmons

(6:30 PM)

Atlanta is the match and they should be looking for young players, expiring contracts and/or a No. 1 pick.

Chris, Dover

You started great early and you're starting to fade here at the most important part. Did Flip Saunders screen this chat for you or something?

Bill Simmons

(6:30 PM)

No the questions have dropped in quality, although we had a great run there for about 5 and a half hours... everyone from the East coast is long gone probably

Danny (Findlay, OH)

Next time you see Rob Neyer are you going to have a Belichick-Mangino akward handshake moment or a Belichick-Mangino akward half man-hug moment?

Bill Simmons

(6:31 PM)

I'm going to give him the Belichick "Hmmm, you're the guy dating my kinky ex-girlfriend, great to meet you!" handshake/smirk.

Spencer (SLC, UT)

Your thoughts on all the "blueprint" talk surrounding the Pats-Eagles game? Any truth to it, or did the Pats just have a bad day and the Eagles played really well?

Bill Simmons

(6:32 PM)

My only thought is this - why was this such a surprise? Blitz Brady, get physical with Moss, abuse the LB's with a quick RB and don't make mistakes. People are reacting like Jonas Salk just created the polio vaccine again.

West Coast Pride

Everyone from the East Coast is long gone? Are you saying that people on the west coast are not as intelligent?

Bill Simmons

(6:33 PM)

No, I'm saying the weather is nicer on the West Coast and people are less likely to enjoy a 7-hour chat... a fair statement, right?

JD (Minneapolis)

You're on the $ with your earlier comment about KG not wanting to take the big shot at the end of the game. He was castigated here for being too eager to pass in those situations. Which was fine when he had Cassell, and should be fine with Pierce. I think this is the perfect situation for him, having two other guys to pass to at the end of the game.

Bill Simmons

(6:34 PM)

It's not that he's unselfish... it's that he's avoided even THINKING about scoring with the exception of OT in the Toronto game. He turns into Ben Wallace. it's bizarre. He's a 50% shooter and shies away from shooting.

Sun (New Jersey)

Dude! You forgot Atlanta! They have all 4 major sports and can't support any of them like a big city should!

Bill Simmons

(6:35 PM)

We have a new winner! Miami just held the crown for exactly 3 minutes. There is no worse major sports city than Atlanta. End of story.

Lesley (London, UK)

This is a great chat Bill. I lost both my parents to cancer and so anything that raises money to prevent that happening to others is great by me. Question - if you were the Mets owner, what would you do to prevent a repeat of last September?

Bill Simmons

(6:36 PM)

Thanks Lesley. As for your question, I would find a way to get Santana and do whatever it took. He'd be a fantastic Met and would be unstoppable in the weaker NL - we'd be looking at Gooden's '85 season all over again (with less IP) and the Mets have had good luck with the name "Santana"

Dan (Washington, DC)

Congrats Bill, looks like you're about to pass the record. However, there are three Kenyan sports columnists that have all answered about 3,500 questions a piece in the same 6 hour and 37 minute block...we're still proud of you though.

Bill Simmons

(6:37 PM)

Dammit, I hate the Kenyan Sports Guy. he's not even breathing hard.

Casey (Pittsburgh, PA)

What about Welker's post game interview the other night? Ditching Andrea Kramer because Belichick was calling him over? I imagine Bill in the role of the overbearing father, pointing at the ground and stamping his feet to beckon Wes, then telling Wes it was "for his own good."

Bill Simmons

(6:38 PM)

I think the coach was afraid that she was going to maul him.

Chris (SF)

Bill, why is Vince Carter a villain for tanking in Toronto when you constantly praise Randy Moss for doing the same thing in Oakland?

Bill Simmons

(6:39 PM)

Because Oakland traded for Moss and surrounded him with terrible coaches and terrible QB's... Toronto never did ANYTHING to Vince Carter. All they did was pay him and build the franchise around him. He wanted to leave there because he wanted to play in an American city.

Bill Simmons

(6:40 PM)

Looks like we made history - thanks to everyone who e-mailed questions! I'm going to keep going if that's cool...

Jay (Long Island, NY)

Congrats Bill. Are you now going to take a 22 minute victory lap around your living room?

Ben (Flushing)

If you could get any announcer, past or present, to "call" the moment that you broke Neyer's record, who would it be and would be the call?

Bill Simmons

(6:43 PM)

Come on, that would be Gus Johnson! That reminds me, when we were exchanging e-mails setting up last week's podcast, he started off one by calling me "Dollar." Now my buddy House calls me "Dollar." So I got that going for me. (Pause) Which is nice.

Sports Gal (West L.A.)

Keep going? Get over here and listen to me complain about how all the women in Mystic Pizza kept so thin while gorging themselves on dough and cheese.

Paul (Texas)

Toronto didn't exactly surround Vince Carter with a lot of talent though. Or try too. Name his second best player?

Bill Simmons

(6:44 PM)

So why re-sign there? Why not just play it out and go to free agency? Instead, he re-signed and proceeded to tank the situation. How was that fair?

Noah (Santa Monica, CA)

I'm going for a record too! Longest time posting questions in a chat without getting any of them answered! You talk a lot about the NBA player being gauged by whether or not you'd want to play with him. So, if you could pick 4 current players to go into a pick up game with, who would they be?

Bill Simmons

(6:45 PM)

I'll make myself an athletic 2-guard in this scenario... I'd go with Nash, Grant Hill, Rasheed Wallace and KG.

Dave (Mexico City)

Toronto had Antonio Davis, Hakeem, Charles Oakley, Alvin Williams, Morris Peterson, not to mention a young Chris Bosh. Please, they did EVERYTHING to give Carter the opportunity to suceed.

Bill Simmons

(6:46 PM)

Yup...

JK (New Haven, CT)

I know you've talked about this before, but how is it that no studio show can even come close to TNT in any sport? Chuck, Ernie, and the Jet have fantastic chemistry and clearly enjoy working. Is this that hard for other networks to understand? On a side note, Frank Caliendo may not be the best, but his impression of Barkley is great,

Bill Simmons

(6:48 PM)

You're right, it's still the best - although there's a little too much over-laughing these days. But I think it's the best because it's the only studio show that's unstructured - those guys have plenty of time to make their points, argue with one another and go in various directions, whereas every other studio show is staged right down to who speaks next.

Bill Simmons

(6:48 PM)

I think it's really strange that everyone else is so afraid to figure out WHY the TNT show works and what they could steal from it. NBC's Sunday night NFL show comes the closest but they have too many people.

Brian (Chicago, IL)

Sports Guy, I haven't had a chance to follow the entire chat and was going to print it out when it's done and read it on the can later. I hit Print Preview and it said it was already 54 pages long! Reading that on the can would cause extreme leg numbness the likes of which haven't been seen since Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon 2!!! I dare any of your readers to attempt this feat of strength...

Bill Simmons

(6:49 PM)

Yeah, I wouldn't print this one out. Larry David's wife would flip out.

Neall (Saratoga Springs, NY)

Sorry, I'm not buying your rationale that approves of Moss stealing paychecks and forcing a fire-sale trade. By the same measure Clemens has been perfectly aboveboard leaving Toronto... I'd probably try to defend it too if he'd ended up coming to my team...but you wouldn't buy it frome me then either.

Bill Simmons

(6:51 PM)

I don't approve of anything Moss did in Oakland - just think it was less reprehensible than what Carter did in Toronto, and also, if a WR is trapped on a bad situation on an NFL team, they're risking their career in every game (especially by going over the middle or stretching out for a Kerry Collins overthrow), whereas NBA players aren't risking anything other than the 0.5% chance of an injury...

Bill Simmons

(6:52 PM)

Moss is a front-runner, just like T.O. - they play hard on good teams, and on bad teams, they'll kill you.

Bill Simmons

(6:53 PM)

Ricky (Tashferd)

Can you comment on Schriber's stint as Ombudsman? I don't know anyone who doesn't think she has been a 1000% improvement.

Bill Simmons

(6:54 PM)

I think she's been fantastic. Puts thought into everything she writes and isn't afraid to go after the Mouse.

Joe, Santa Monica CA

top 5 best pizza joints in LA?

Bill Simmons

(6:55 PM)

Mulberry Street in Bev Hills, Village Pizzeria in Larchmont, and as a distant third, Albano's on Melrose

Brandon, Duluth

Sorry if this questions was written during hour number three, but when do you plan to your annual NBA trade column? Favorite column of the year of any writer.

Bill Simmons

(6:56 PM)

Thanks! It's coming within the next 2 weeks. I also might use the phone call where Joe House and I figure out the top-40 as a delayed podcast to run when the column runs. I'm going all out this year.

Bill Simmons

(6:56 PM)

One question though: For the first year ever, you could legitimately go with a Top-50. Do I expand it to 50 or stay with the top-40 ground rules? The league is 10 good guys deeper now.

Blake (Kingston, ON)

Alright it's time for the Raptors game, so I'm done trying. I can't fault you for not putting one of my questions in, you've probably had thousands. However, I'm going to hope this is like my intramural basketball team and now, with the win sealed up, you'll allow me some garbage minutes towards the end of the chat. So as a last try...what are the chances of Al Horford (or longshot, Jamario Moon) upsetting Durant for ROY, especially if Horford goes 10-10 plus 2 blocks?

Bill Simmons

(6:58 PM)

Horford has the best chance - it's not improbable if the Hawks start winning. But I still think Durant is going to average 24 a game in Dec./Jan and 27-28 a game after the break.

Bill Simmons

(6:58 PM)

Trade for him if you can.

Scott (New York, NY)

JIMMY V ANECDOTE: I coached at Vinny Del Negro?s basketball camp a few summers in Sacramento (started during his Kings years at my old high school) and every year he would give a heartfelt speech about Jimmy V, calling him the most important person in his life, and without fail Vinny would choke up ? which was no act, because while Vinny D?s a fantastic guy, a thespian he is not. Anyway, it was incredible to see him make a gym full of jaded adolescents just a little misty for a few minutes ? and to see what an all-around impact Jimmy V had on his life. Another annual highlight was Vinny?s unprecedented and repeated use of the term ?what have yous??..

Jeff: (Plymouth, MI):

My freshman year of college I was high and somehow managed to stumble across the Jim Valvano speech on ESPN and I realized it was the greatest speech EVER. So anyone that isn't giving money should get high and watch it, it would raise billions.

Bill Simmons

(6:59 PM)

Here it is... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePXlkqkFH6s

David (New York)

I just watched the Jim Valvano ESPY's speech on Youtube and it moved me to tears, like usual, and I donated $50 to the V Foundation. I'm just out of college living in NYC, so that is as much as I can afford. I hope everybody else reading this out there watches that speech and gives anything they can. Thanks Bill. Yankees rule.

Dermot (san bruno CA)

What is the greatest sports speech you've ever heard? I keep the Jimmy V at the ESPY's on my laptop and liten to it frequently. If that man could summon the strength to deliver that speech with all he was going through I have nothing to complain about!!

Bill Simmons

(7:02 PM)

It's my favorite real-life sports speech. Favorite sports movie speech would be either the chef telling the Pele story in "Vision Quest" or Pacino's speech in "Any Given Sunday"

Z (Los Angeles)

You broke the timer!!! Is that like the Natural hitting a homerun into lights? Take your trot around the bases in super-slo-mo!

Bill Simmons

(7:02 PM)

Right now my teammates are jumping out of my dugout in slow motion.

Bill Simmons

(7:04 PM)

This seems like a good time to wrap things up. If you enjoyed this chat, please give a little to the Jimmy V Foundation. Thanks to everyone who sent in questions, we had a whopping 91,000. Enjoy the rest of the day/night whereever you are.