Pages

23 November 2015

What to Expect at a Cuban Thanksgiving.

I am Cuban. I really don't need to say more. Have you ever been to a Cuban party? Have you ever been to a Cuban Thanksgiving? Here are some helpful tips on what to expect at a Cuban Thanksgiving, in case you ever go to one... you can survive!

1. Prepare yourself for a house filled with at least over 40 people. Cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, long lost siblings and family members that you didn't even know you had.

2. Don't be scared at how fast the cubans are speaking. We can speak 1 mile a minute and understand eachother just fine. You'll get the hang of it. Eventually. If not just nod and say si.

3. Don't count on having an early dinner. Dinner wont be served until 10 at night!

4. Bring your own bottle of booze. One cuban per bottle. We drink. A LOT.

5. Count on seeing a lot of expressions and emotions you never even knew existed.

6. Prepare for your ears to hurt by the end of the night. Talking loud is normal. We are not screaming or fighting we are simply having a normal conversation.

7. Once arriving and through out the whole night, prepare yourself for constantly kissing every one on the cheek.

8. Expect to see more Pork and ham than turkey. If theres any turkey at all.

9. There will be a variety of music and dancing. We will go from love, romance and slow dancing, to reggaeton and straight up booty and grinding.

10. Prepare yourself on seeing old ladies join in and possibly even start the bumping and grinding to reggaeton music.

11. You will hear a lot of spanglish talk. Cojelo con take it easy.

12. Count on all the old people asking all the single young people why they are single.

13. Count on all the old people asking the couples when they are having babies.

14. You will hear a lot of baseball talk and how much the Miami Marlins either suck or are doing better. (Mostly suck)

15. Expect to be apart of at least 3 conga dances throughtout the night.

16 . Don't be frightened at the amount of bad words being spoken. Puta & Pinga are more a term of endearment than what you think it means.

17. Count on seeing half of the men wearing a guayabera and smoking a cuban cigar.

18. Expect that Noche Buena (Christmas eve) and El Fin De Año (New Years eve) have already been planned.