What?! The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. In my experience, there is no such thing as luck. I’m trying not to, kid.

Jedi Academy

Don’t act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren’t on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I want to know what happened to the plans they sent you. Escape is not his plan. I must face him, alone. Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. What!? As you wish. Look, I can take you as far as Anchorhead. You can get a transport there to Mos Eisley or wherever you’re going.

I don’t know what you’re talking about. I am a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan–

Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you.

I’m trying not to, kid.

He is here.

Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you.

The Empire Strikes Back

As you wish. I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct. He is here.

Jedi Academy

Obi-Wan is here. The Force is with him. Don’t underestimate the Force. Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. Hey, Luke! May the Force be with you. I want to come with you to Alderaan. There’s nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and be a Jedi, like my father before me. What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain’t my idea of courage. It’s more like…suicide.

Dantooine. They’re on Dantooine.

What good is a reward if you ain’t around to use it? Besides, attacking that battle station ain’t my idea of courage. It’s more like…suicide.

I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct.

The Phantom Menace

I can’t get involved! I’ve got work to do! It’s not that I like the Empire, I hate it, but there’s nothing I can do about it right now. It’s such a long way from here. Don’t underestimate the Force. Don’t underestimate the Force.

Attack of the Clones

Still, she’s got a lot of spirit. I don’t know, what do you think? Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid. As you wish. In my experience, there is no such thing as luck. Remember, a Jedi can feel the Force flowing through him.

A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Kids, kids. I’m not going to die. That only happens to bad people. Slow down, Bart! My legs don’t know how to be as long as yours.

The Itchy and Scratchy and Poochie Show

D’oh. What’s the point of going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway. When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun. Your questions have become more redundant and annoying than the last three “Highlander” movies.

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you’d step over your own mother just to get one! But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun.

Natural Born Kissers

They only come out in the night. Or in this case, the day. Save me, Jeebus. I didn’t get rich by signing checks.

The Last Temptation of Homer

I can’t go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency. Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man? Jesus must be spinning in his grave! Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I work, I work. And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold.

Jesus must be spinning in his grave!

We started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended up in tragedy.

I was saying “Boo-urns.”

I’m a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.

Marge vs. Monorail

Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. Human contact: the final frontier. Oh, so they have Internet on computers now!

Homer the Great

How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive? I don’t like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing, there’s too many fat children. I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! Homer no function beer well without. Me fail English? That’s unpossible.