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Ari Herstand, Author How To Make It in the New Music Business: Practical Tips on Building a Loyal Following and Making a Living as a Musician (a real hero to me). MJS

Written by Mitch SantellProducer / Co-Founder

This morning I received an email from Ari Herstand who I follow on a regular basis. This is what he had to say:​

Dear creepy men of the music industry, please stop...

I saw one of ionie‘s posts on Facebook about something that recently happened to her and asked her if this was just a one time experience from a creeper or something that she encountered regularly in the music industry.

Unfortunately, she told me it was the latter. So I asked her if she would share some of her experiences. She has courageously revealed what it’s like to be a woman in the music industry. When she told some female colleagues she was working on this article they encouraged her not to write it for fear of backlash or blacklisting. She went ahead anyway and I am grateful she did, so men can finally get a glimpse into women’s realities. And make a fucking change.

As a man, I have been completely oblivious to what women have to put up with from (many) men on the regular. After some more investigating, I have realized that this isn’t unique to ionie. It is apparently commonplace in the industry. And that’s disgusting, infuriating and, frankly, disappointing. I have only witnessed, firsthand, this kind of sexualized power dynamic once and it left me sick to my stomach – and it didn’t even happen to me!

Last year at a music conference I was chatting with an up and coming attorney, let’s call her Jane, at the dinner thrown for all panelists. We mostly chatted about the state of the music industry and where we saw our place in it. We were both around the same age and starting to make a place for ourselves in the biz. A very well-established music attorney acquaintance of mine, let’s call him Jon, was a couple tables away and I called him over because I thought this is a great connection for Jane. He walked over, I introduced them with quick little bios to talk each one up – as you do – and immediately Jon put his hand on Jane’s head, stroked her hair and said “wow, you’re so beautiful.” Jane was seated and Jon was standing. The physical dynamic couldn’t have been more apt. This powerful man in the industry was towering over her while he touched her. I was stunned. Jon just met her and immediately he made it about her looks and started touching her. I quickly diverted the conversation and asked Jon how his panel was. As Jon and I were chatting he kept stroking her hair. Occasionally he’d pause, look at her and say “beautiful.” Then he invited me to an event he was throwing and he said “bring Jane.”

Jon left. I sat back down. Jane was noticeably shaken. As was I. I didn’t know how to continue our conversation. I so badly wanted to apologize for Jon’s actions because I invited him over. He was my contact. I felt let down by Jon as I had respected him for years. He’s extremely well-established in the music industry and has huge clients. He is in a position of power that Jane and I were not. But in that moment, I lost all respect for Jon. I said nothing. Jane said nothing. But the following day, as the experience had been gnawing at me, I wrote Jane and email and apologized. She boldly said that “it reflected the character of Jon.” And she was right.

As we get to ionie’s stories below, let me make this perfectly clear to the creepy men of the music industry: you’ve been put on notice. This shit ain’t acceptable anymore. It’s time to change. This has nothing to do with women and everything to do with men. Women can wear bikinis or burkas to business meetings and studio sessions for all I care. It shouldn’t make a difference. Treat them how you treat your male counterparts. (Click below to read the rest of the story):