Q: What is it with Scientology and Disconnection?

True, but you should read the actual "disconnection policy". Just because Scientology sometimes has its own "Scientologese" (language) this does not mean that its concepts are unknown in other groups. Disconnection is something which happens every day in groups or families. I am sure you applied it yourself already. Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard just sat down and wrote it up, as a right somebody has.

It says: "Perhaps the most fundamental right of any being is the right to communicate. Without this freedom, other rights deteriorate. Communication, however, is a two-way flow. If one has the right to communication, the one must also have the right to not receive communication from another. ... The term 'disconnection' is defined as a self-determined decision made by an individual that he is not going to be connected to another. ... With our tech of handle or disconnect, we are, in actual fact, doing nothing different that any society or group or marriage down through thousands of years. ... We cannot afford to deny Scientologists that basic freedom that is granted to everyone else: the right to choose whom one wishes to communicate with or not communicate with." (10 September 1983).

You could chose on your own free will to stay together with a person who is hurting and harassing you. Scientology however does not support masochism or any kind of self-invalidation. Scientologists also do not appreciate to be pulled or held down. So they either try to fix the relation (handle) or cut it (disconnect). Sure the person on the other end sometimes does not like it, goes around complaining, in some cases blaming everybody else for his or her own condition. That won't do anything. But such a person always has the choice to become a tolerant and polite person, someone you like to be connected with. The Church would help in such a case.

*SP = Suppressive Person. Here is what THAT means:

Suppressive Person (SP): a person who possesses a distinct set of characteristics and mental attitudes that cause him to suppress other people in his vicinity. This is the person whose behavior is calculated to be disastrous. Also called antisocial personality. What an antisocial personality is in Scientology has been written up very nicely in the Scientology Handbook (which is also online). Here is the relevant chapter.

In practice, an SP is a status of a member of Scientology. Someone who intentionally messed things up repeatedly or really badly violated internal rules gets "declared a Suppressive Person". That means he or she gets kicked out of the Church of Scientology and that's it. Nothing more or less. His or her membership is canceled and that person is given the boot. Peculiarly in Scientology is that anyone, also a declared SP, can come back to the Church. I know some people who came back after cooling down and they are Scientologists again.