I hate to fill this board with sadness, but the only thing that's helped me feel better has been the majority of a bottle of wine courtesy of my wonderful roomie.

I grew up with a beautiful, lovely golden retriever. Her name is Casey and she's spent the last 16 years as a member of our family. She's been through a lot with us, I have scars my knees as she dragged me down our driveway in my Sunday dress and tights. My mom was furious, but at the same time, Casey protected us from the dangers of the world, strangers who approached us as we played and the ever so dangerous roller blades. Unfortunately, she's been sick for awhile. Like all of my family, my dad and Casey remained stubborn and tough. She had a huge tumor on her side, but both of those silly creatures refused to go to the vet. Casey got a bit slower in her last year and took to hanging outside a lot. It took longer to get her motor running, she had the occasional seizure, and she needed a boost up the stairs most of the time.

This morning she was resting behind my mom's car in the area where my dad had cleared away the snow. My mom started to leave for work, but Casey was in her blind spot and couldn't get up fast enough. Her paw was broken and my parents immediately rushed her to the vet. The vet said that the paw would be repairable, but the x-rays showed that the cancer had spread extensively, including to her lungs. She had issues breathing and was in horrible pain. She stayed outside all of the time numb herself.So you can guess what they decided to do... I just wish I was there. To say goodbye or something, I don't know. I don't know what to do. Except I have a another leftover bottle of wine in my fridge and can't stop crying. So it's either the leftover wine or another box of tissues. I've lost one of my closest friends. Thanks Casey for being the best dog a little girl could ever hope for.

Your post made me tear up. It reminded me of saying good bye to my boys, like it was yesterday. May you find peace in knowing that she is no longer in pain. And may you find comfort in knowing you and your family gave her a wonderful home and life. I'm so sorry for your loss and sadness.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my golden retreiver, Cosmo, in a similar manner - not living/being there when my parents made the decision to put him to sleep. It's a tremendous weight and sadness to experience, not being able to physical say goodbye. I don't think I truly got over the loss, but I've managed to bring and keep Cosmo into so many aspects of my life that it's like he's still here. Make sure you have or are able to get some photographs of Casey throughout her and your life. Never take them down or replace them. The pain will ease, I promise.

((hugs)) I also recently lost my childhood baby, and there isn't much to say to make it better. but it sounds like she had a wonderful life and I am sure that she knew how much she was loved (and is loved). ((hugs))

_________________sometimes, I see a really cute woman and I'm so excited I poop myself ~ Olives

I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my golden retreiver, Cosmo, in a similar manner - not living/being there when my parents made the decision to put him to sleep. It's a tremendous weight and sadness to experience, not being able to physical say goodbye. I don't think I truly got over the loss, but I've managed to bring and keep Cosmo into so many aspects of my life that it's like he's still here. Make sure you have or are able to get some photographs of Casey throughout her and your life. Never take them down or replace them. The pain will ease, I promise.

My mom wanted me home for the weekend. And I don't think I can do that yet, but when I do I'm going to find some good photos of all of us together to frame at the apartment. Every year we take a Christmas picture with her. I know that there are a couple really funny ones of her lunging at my dad with the camera.