MOVIE REVIEW: 'Queen of the Desert' an arid account of a fascinating life

Friday

Apr 7, 2017 at 5:45 AM

The film examines the life of Gertrude Bell, the woman who is credited with helping divvy up the spoils of the Middle East following the fall of the Ottoman Empire during World War I. But what's missing is any real context to her amazing accomplishments.

By Al Alexander/For The Patriot Ledger

It would be easy to confuse Werner Herzog’s “Queen of the Desert” as a long-play version of one of Nicole Kidman’s swanky Chanel ads. As Gertrude Bell, the so-called female Lawrence of Arabia, Kidman looks radiant in flowing cotton robes and stylish hijab; all filmed in adoring golden lights set against wide expanses of rippling sand. Sweat, despite the searing desert heat, is not an option. She is always cool, calm and collecting what one hopes is a significant paycheck for turning the protofeminist Bell into a simpering romantic always missing her man. If only the dudes would stop killing themselves over her. Even the many Bedouin sheiks she meets along the way want to make her part of their harem. So what was it about Bell that enchanted so many men of Arab and British persuasion? I’m not really sure, since Herzog pays her such short shrift over his film’s luxuriating 128 minutes. He’s more interested in pretty pictures and gorgeous actors than he is with the powerful woman credited with helping divvy up the spoils of the Middle East following the fall of the Ottoman Empire during World War I.

Herzog, who penned the script in addition to directing, takes Bell totally at face value; never diving under her alabaster skin to seek what motivated her and, more importantly, what attracted her so deeply to the desert denizens who accepted her as their own. Other than her troubled love life, there’s nothing here that can’t be found in a quick check on Wikipedia: That she provided guidance to Churchill (Christopher Fulford) and T.E. Lawrence (badly miscast Robert Pattinson); that she earned a rare honours degree in history at Oxford; that she was a writer, cartographer, archaeologist, diplomat and most intriguingly, a spy. That’s all here. But what’s missing is any real context to her amazing accomplishments.

Rather, Herzog rushes along, touching on the greatest hits of Bell’s remarkable career, from just after the turn of the last century to her participation as the only woman at the 1921 Conference in Cairo. Between, we glean glimpses into Bell’s affairs with junior diplomat Henry Cadogan (James Franco) and married British military stiff-shirt Charles Doughty-Wylie (Damian Lewis). Neither actor strikes any sparks opposite Kidman, but both do what they can with the thin material.

Same for Kidman, who looks amazing, albeit in an icy, aristocratic way. She’s best in scenes out in the desert, leading expeditions and studies of Bedouin life. She’s at her worst whenever melodrama becomes part of the equation, which is much too often. Yet, it’s hard not to be drawn to her Gertrude’s insatiable thirst for knowledge and adventure. Even when called upon to utter corny lines like “Take me to your sheik,” Kidman is convincing.

The biggest problem is Herzog’s script, which lacks both form and direction. And, does he really expect us to believe that Bell’s father would use the phrase “No-cry zone” at the dinner table in 1902? Even bigger obstacles lie in Herzog’s inability to escape the long shadow of David Lean’s vastly superior “Lawrence of Arabia.” “Queen of the Desert” shares that film’s breathtaking vistas, as well as a reasonable facsimile of Maurice Jarre’s Oscar-winning score, but it possesses not a fraction of the former’s gravitas or depth. And it does Herzog no favors to have Bell repeatedly cross paths with Pattinson’s (somnambulant) T.E. Lawrence, dredging up fond memories of Lean’s sand-and-camels epic.

I can’t say “Queen of the Desert” isn’t marginally intriguing. Nor can I ignore the inspirational qualities of Bell’s feisty independence and diplomatic flare. But there’s no getting past the flimsiness of a movie that’s too often as dry as the Arabian sands. QUEEN OF THE DESERT (PG-13 for brief nudity and some language.) Cast: Nicole Kidman, Damian Lewis, James Franco and Robert Pattinson. Grade: C