There are certain foods and restaurants in Shanghai that cause entirely too many expat mouthgasms for how good they are. Here are five of the most overrated ones, along with their tastier alternatives.5. Overrated: FOMOThe KFC of crayfish chains, FOMO offers picky eaters a sanitized xiaolongxia experience with a spotless interior, and crawdads with their heads and guts removed. It misses the point. Eating crayfish should be gritty, hands-on, and even slightly scuzzy. There should be an outdoor wok and foldout tables, a hepatitis-ridden tub of live critters, and most of all, the freaking heads! That’s where the tomalley and juices mingle with the spices to create the space-time continuum-splitting flavor. Removing it is culinary castration. Even laowai from the Southern US know that. Okay, they do offer noggin-on versions too, but they’re as bland as the decor. Still, criticizing FOMO for its crayfish is like taking shots at McDonald’s hamburgers – obviously they’re going for mass appeal over flavor or authenticity. And it’s paying dividends as the line outside of the original is a mile long.FOMO (original location) // 172 Huaihai Zhong Lu, near Pu’an Lu (淮海路172号,近普安路). Tel: (0)21-6385-5152. Hours: 11am-4am. Closest metro stop: Dashijie, line 9.

Tastier alternative: Duan’s CrayfishThe opposite of FOMO. An outdoor stove, billowing smoke, a tub of glossy-wet crawdads as big as Atlantic lobsters. Most importantly, they’re served head-on. 30RMB gets you approximately one jin of the scuttlers, which are tossed with garlic, cumin, chili, green peppers, aniseed, cinnamon, and more and then mounded in the metal tub in front of you. Wrench off the heads, suck them dry, and then peel the tail like it’s a crustacean candy bar and gobble the sweet meat. Best to hit up Duan’s in early to mid-July when the critters are at their most swollen. There are several branches, but we prefer the one on Changhua Road.Duan’s // 107 Changhua Lu, near Anyuan Lu (昌化路107号, 近安远路). Hours: 4pm-4am daily. Closest metro stop: Changshou Road, line 7.

4. Overrated: Downtown seafood restaurantsFace it, most seafood restaurants in Shanghai proper serve seafood that’s been sitting in their murky tanks so long it’s practically sprouted a beard. And you’ll pay through the nose for it. We’re talking north of 1,000RMB for a gangrenous geoduck, around 90RMB for a jin of mangled mantis shrimp, and 90-100RMB per jin for some not-so-razor-sharp razor clams.

Tastier alternative: The Tongchuan Fish MarketLike with all things, it’s best to skip the middleman and get your seafood right from the source. Not the ocean, but the next best thing: the Tongchuan Fish Market, Shanghai’s central seafood wholesaler, which supplies most of the restaurants in town. Naturally, it has the most variety, freshest creatures, and most important, the lowest prices. Small mantis shrimp run you only 20-30RMB per jin, one fifth of what you’d pay downtown, and the rest of the critters follow suit. So select your seafood, haul it to a nearby restaurant, and enjoy.Tongchuan Road, near Lanxi Road (铜川路, 近兰溪路). Closest Metro Stop: Zhenru, line 11.

3. Overrated: Southern BarbarianOnce ground zero for Shanghai’s Yunnan scene, Southern Barbarian has lost its luster in recent years. The lounge music, gloomy lighting, practically catatonic wait staff, and constant emptiness seem to attest to this. And the flavors have become as subdued as the ambience, despite the fact that they source their food fresh from Yunnan. It’d almost be tragic if some of the dishes didn’t set you back as much as at a French banquet. A stringy plate of seasonal mushrooms ran us 78RMB. Fortunately they’ve got a few things still going for them; namely their bier garden-esque selection of brews from the Czech Republic, Belgium, the US, and more. Oh, and I still think their bugs are the best bar snacks I’ve ever eaten.Southern Barbarian // Ju’Roshine Life Arts Space, 2/F, 169 Jinxian Lu, near Maoming Nan Lu (进贤路169号2楼, 近茂名南路). Tel: (0)21-5157-5510. Hours: 11am-2pm lunch, 5pm-11pm dinner. Closest metro stop: South Shanxi Road, lines 1/10.

Tastier alternative: Lotus EateryLotus eatery is basically Southern Barbarian if you jolted it back to life with a defibrillator. It has many of the same dishes – fried goat cheese, spicy mint salad – except here they’re vibrant and delicious. And way cheaper. We’ve waxed poetic about this restaurant on more than one occasion, so we’ll spare you. The three dishes to order are the umami-licious fried goat cheese, the Miao roast lake fish, and the signature mashed potatoes.Lotus Eatery // 85 Yangzhai Lu, near Xinhua Lu (杨宅路85号, 近新华路). Tel: (0)21-6282-7756. Hours: 11am-11pm daily. Closest metro stop: Hongqiao Road, lines 3/4/10.

2. Overrated: Red-cooked pork blocks (红烧肉, hong shao rou)You see them on practically every Shanghai menu. These ubiquitous red-cooked pork blocks are practically synonymous with Shanghai cuisine. They entail fatty pork belly cubed and braised in the classic Shanghainese cocktail of soy sauce, rice wine, and sugar, though recipes vary. We especially like Jesse’s version with dried cuttlefish. But, as sacred as these are, we’ve always found both the fat and sugar to be a bit gratuitous. And in the red-cooked genre, you can do a lot better.Jesse Restaurant // 41 Tianping Lu, near Huaihai Xi Lu (天平路41号, 近淮海西路). Tel: (0)21-6282-9260. Hours: 11am-4pm, 5:30pm-12am daily. Closest metro stop: Jiaotong University, line 10.

Tastier alternative: Red-cooked pork knuckle (红烧蹄膀, hongshao tipang)Enter “pork knuckle” (technically pork shoulder), a veritable meat monolith marinated with the same holy trinity of soy, rice wine, and rock sugar, and braised for hours. However, here the marinade is tarry, rich, and refreshingly non-cloying, and the fat’s more integrated with the meat. Even when you hit a big swath of it, it’s more gelatinous than unctuous. And there’s a big Flintstonian bone in the center. Everything’s better bone-in. The favorite purveyor is Jesse, although for some reason, when you reserve the pork shoulder in advance they’re often out of it when you arrive – defeating the whole point of a reservation. So recently we’ve been hitting up the version at Rui Fu Yuan, which only requires a 40-minute notice. And it’s 78RMB compared to Jesse’s 98RMB.Jesse Restaurant // 41 Tianping Lu, near Huaihai Xi Lu (天平路41号, 近淮海西路). Tel: (0)21-6282-9260. Hours: 11am-4pm, 5:30pm-12am daily. Closest metro stop: Jiaotong University, line 10.Rui Fu Yuan // 132 Maoming Nan Lu, near Fuxing Zhong Lu (茂名南路132号乙, 近复兴中路). Tel: (0)21-6445-8999. Hours: 11am-2pm, 5pm-9:30pm. Closest metro stop: South Shanxi Road, lines 1/10.

1. Overrated: Yang’s Fry DumplingThought Din Tai Fung would claim the number one spot? Sorry, but despite being labelled a glitzy Taiwan chain that “Shanghai’d” Shanghai’s staple food, it serves some of the best XLB in Shanghai. Yang’s Fry Dumpling, on the other hand, doesn’t offer close to the best fried dumplings (shengjian mantou) in town, and yet it’s touted as such. YFD’s even recommended as one of the must-try eating attractions in Shanghai. I’m not making any friends here, but what’s the big deal with this place? It’s a solid fried dumpling, don’t get me wrong, but how is it drastically different from the grease-bombs in your average street-wok – a bit more uniform and hotter due to high turnover, perhaps. And the pork filling doesn’t taste all that unique; basically the same generic, gristly meatball you find in any ol’ baozi.Yang’s Fry Dumpling // 97 Huanghe Lu, near Fengyang Lu (黄河路97号, 近凤阳路). Tel: (0)21-5375-1793. Hours: 6.30am-8pm daily. Closest metro stop: People’s Square, lines 1/2/8

Tastier alternative: Da Hu ChunThe real dumpling in the rough is found at Da Hu Chun, which has been frying shengjian mantou practically since the dish’s creation almost a hundred years ago. While most street vendors use the “troubled water technique” (混水, hún shuǐ) or frying it on the pleated side, Da Hu Chun uses the “clear water method” (清水, qīngshuǐ) so the non-pleated side gets browned. The result looks grizzled and shrunken, almost like it could use a couple presses of the bike pump, but it’s one of the most sumptuous pairings of pork and dough in the city. Despite looking deflated, the wrapper feels poofy like a baozi, while also harboring that ear-gasmic crunch we love. And the inside is even better; sweet, and so juicy you’d think you hit an artery of pork fat when you bite in.Da Hu Chun // 11 Sichuan Nan Lu, near Yan’an Dong Lu (四川南路11号, 近延安东路). Tel: (0)21-6330-8402. Hours: 7:30am-8pm. Closest metro stop: East Nanjing Road, lines 2/10.