Is this a respect issue?

Whenever I lie on the floor my Dalmatian tries to tea bag me. I'm wondering if this is some sort of respect issue or if it is a sign of affection. I hate it when I get tea bagged in Counter Strike so having it happen in real life is pretty disappointing.

Is that a properly certified job they have to train and qualify for, to a reasonable standard, or something you can become by sending in the token from a box of Weetbix or just waking up one day and saying that's what you are?

There's a couple of vets on here so I'd hold off on spending money, or beating the animal, until you hear what they have to say. Give them a bit more information though. Has he still got his balls (it's only teabagging if he has but still confirm it)? Are there other pets? How often does he get exercise? Backyard? Sleeps where?

Is that a properly certified job they have to train and qualify for, to a reasonable standard, or something you can become by sending in the token from a box of Weetbix or just waking up one day and saying that's what you are?

Degrees in Zoology and Psychology, plus very extensive training time with animals...usually around 20+ years.

So yes...it's "a properly certified job they have to train and qualify for".

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Believe it or not I'm more than aware that animal behaviour is something scientists study. However if you think that's most likely the type of person who'll turn up if you find one online or in the phonebook you're crazy.

What I was hoping for however is someone would know if there was a distinction or restriction in job titles between a tertiary or otherwise properly qualified expert who's proven they have the knowledge such as an engineer or electrician, or if it's the typical half-assed thing where there's no regulation at all such as car-stereo installer or computer technician.

Believe it or not I'm more than aware that animal behaviour is something scientists study. However if you think that's most likely the type of person who'll turn up if you find one online or in the phonebook you're crazy.

What I was hoping for however is someone would know if there was a distinction or restriction in job titles between a tertiary or otherwise properly qualified expert who's proven they have the knowledge such as an engineer or electrician, or if it's the typical half-assed thing where there's no regulation at all such as car-stereo installer or computer technician.

Apparently not. (Cert II and below are generally common sense courses for people who don't have any).

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Veterinarian checking in here...

Pretty sure human psychology has absolutely no bearing on animal training. And zoology is entirely useless!

A true veterinary behaviourist is a specialist who has to sit exams to qualify, and also demonstrate more than an extended knowledge of animal behaviour, usually in more than just dogs and cats (horses etc).
It is a HIGHLY qualified position, and there are only a handful of true veterinary behaviourists in Australia.

There's loads of morons who think they know everything about training dogs though. And so many who don't know their ass from their elbow but love giving their opinions on training and behaviour.

Can you take a video of your Dalmatian's behaviour and post it up here? I can see if I can help, but no guarantees. It's probably a play behaviour, I've seen dogs sitting on each other like that and it definitely seems playful rather than dominant-aggressive.

cant agree more with karigan, there are far too many twats out there that think they know it all when really they have no clue

it could be something as simple as your dog wanting affection... i know if i lie down on the ground my dog will come and jump on me for hugs and cuddles, then he gets excited and has no idea what to do so he stars licking, grooming and potentially mouthing me but i usually stop him before it goes that far. other people see it and say i have no control of him and he is biting me

When invited, my dog does sit on my lap. He's 35kg so I don't invite him to do that too often. I'm guessing he may just be trying to sit on my head and I'm mistaking it for teabagging. He doesn't have any tea in his bags but there is still the empty remnants. Does that mean it isn't teabagging?

I thought about video recording it and putting it up on YouTube, seeking people's advice. But then thought I would become a meme. And not a good meme.

So dogs sitting on your feet is dominant or possessive? My older (male) dog has started sitting on my feet while being very submissive. Kind of at odds.

Animal behavior is very confusing for me. Presumably what applies for one dog may not apply exactly the same to another?

My puppy (female) tries to mount you from behind if you sit on the floor. So many licks. Delivery seems a playful behavior.

I did think to have my feet sitter checked out by a behaviouralist but with some research decided that given the vet said he was a very well looking dog only a week before that is keep my money in my pocket and not invest in a potentially corn flake box professional.

I'm another cornflakes box professional when it comes to animal behaviour.

Whether it was submissive or possessive or even aggressive behaviour. Does it matter? It's unwelcome and I'd be giving a push away and a firm no, no matter what the ultimate reasoning was.

My Mrs small dog jumps on laps, it weighs 5kg or something and it's genuinely not a huge problem. But it was unwelcomed 99% of the time and was a bad habit for when guests came around. Trained her out of it until invited.