Thursday, February 28, 2008

Quarterlife (not the sucky TV one brought to you by the makers of My So Called Life)

Seeing that people who live in the District pride themselves on never leaving the District, the Taxation Without Representation license plates have really only spread the message of DC’s lack of voting powers to places like the Pentagon City Costco or Potomac Yard Target. And now that the US Mint has decided that the topic is the Roe v. Wade of American coinage, the rest of the nation is blissfully forced to continue ignoring the issue.

However, it now gives me a chance to resubmit my idea for the DC quarter. The two bars and three stars of the Flag are boring. As is the truncated diamond shape that marks the cities boundaries, even though that’s probably what they’ll end up doing. And this is especially true since all the other states that have put maps of themselves on their quarters are decidedly lame. Ohio, we are specifically talking about you and your weak-sauce requisitioning of the Wright Brothers Flyer from North Carolina.

If DC really wants to stand out among the quarters, they need to do what I suggest. In fact, they would stand out among every coin ever minted in the history of currency. Even among shiny shells and beads and pesos.

I propose that the DC quarter has George Washington’s profile on the head’s side and George Washington’s profile on the tails side. I’ll let that sink in. I want DC to have a coin that has two head sides on it. It will be teh awesome.

It doesn’t have to be a straight up mirror image of the current profile. It can be a young Elvis version. Or they could even have him looking to the front a little bit like Jefferson is on the new nickel.

This idea is genius. Washington DC, please send me my complimentary roll of free quarters that I naturally assume I'll get for coming up with the winning idea. I have laundry to do.