[yes that is going to be a problem...hmm...well as long as he thinks it'll help it should work right? and besides they'll probably be talking about why Remus is upset before Remus tells Sev that alcohol is bad and he'll be so upset that he'll have forgotten his own advice and just drink it haha]

[Haha, yeah. Since I'm not going to be on much this weekend, do you want to just fast forward time a few days and do it tonight? Or wait until Monday night... or Tuesday, night. Or crap. I'm really busy next week O_o]

[NO! FISHY POND CLOSED!][ok in the interest of Sev not being available, I'm turning this from a present drama llama to a ticking time bomb of a drama llama, ok?]

*she sighs and rubs her hands up and down his arms, even though the material of his shirt is scratchy and irritating against her skin.*

Severus again. It's always going to come back to bloody Severus...

*keeps her voice light, because he's too drunk for his conversation, and she's so sick of it but deep down, she can't help that flicker of doubt. she tries so hard to bury it, but sometimes when she least expects it, it reminds her of its presence in the sharpest of ways*

I didn't know you were friends again. And yes, drinking is very bad but his choices aren't your fault and you have nothing to apologise for, ok?

*she can't reach to kiss his cheek, and has to settle for pressing a quick kiss behind his earlobe, idly wondering how much he'd actually had to drink, and when it was going to wear off. there was nothing more uncomfortable to her than being stuck in all this wet clothing, and she was longing for some dry jammies and a warm bed now*

[haha we can do it tonight. i'll actually be able to get on a lot next week since i'm heading back to school and saturday i'm skipping out on work to get a project done (which i procrastinated on while being on here haha) so tonight'll work I guess. gah a bug was just crawling on me >.>

Remus sighed, "But...why doesn't he realize that drinking's not going to solve anything??? He seems like he keeps heading down the path to self-destruction but why would he do that when there are people who care about him? He's not that bad really."

[I'll have to rethink some stuff, but I should probably be able to work something new out for Mya at the dance...][lol you should feel bad, poor Hermione is on a constant emotional rollercoaster! ]

*she has the sudden, childish urge to shove him away from her and has actually got both her hands behind his shoulders, ready to push him off her chest before she manages to control herself. he's drunk, unpredictable, and as irritated as she is, she'd never forgive herself if he hurt himself in this state. her eyes flash dangerously though, and maybe it's the hope that he'll remember none of this in the morning that gives her courage to open her mouth and let all the bile she'd been storing deep in her soul come tumbling out*

Oh I am so bloody sick of Severus Snape! I'm sick of the way he comes between you and everyone around you! I'm sick of the way you change your mind about whether or not you're friends with him every single bloody day! I'm sick of the way it feels like a constant competition for your affection! I'm sick of having to feel doubtful and insecure every time I lay eyes on him!AND MOST OF ALL, I'M SICK AND TIRED OF FEELING LIKE HE'S GOT SOMETHING MORE TO OFFER YOU THAN I HAVE!

*she breaks off, her chest heaving both of them in the water as she tries to regain her breath, and feels her hands start to shake*

Remus stared back in shock. His mind was clearing a bit now and all that she'd said registered almost quite clearly in his mind. "Hermione..." Ooooh damn. What have I been talking about the past couple of minutes? He thought about it for a second. OH. NOT GOOD. Remus bloody Lupin this is why you don't drink you can't keep your thoughts to yourself."You...don't really like him I know that...but he's my friend." Remus couldn't get his thoughts totally focused. "Why is everyone so ready to hate on him? I'm not asking you to be his friend I just...you understand what I'm trying to say?"

*she realises, all too late, that the hazy look in his eyes has cleared and she stares back. she breaks. the weight of it all is suddenly crashing upon her and she can't do anything but start to cry. she'd tried so, so hard to let it go, to focus on the love, to trust him, but it seemed like every time they got somewhere remotely close to happiness, it's yanked cruelly away, crashing down around their heads like a house of cards. her voice comes out almost as a wild howl, something from a hurt and angry and trapped animal*

I don't hate him! Why can't you see? You can't have three people in a relationship Remus! It's always you and me, and always you and him. It's always him you're going back to - him you can't stay away from, him you just need to make sure is alright. And I try, I really do try, so hard to trust you, to believe you when you say it's over. But actions speak louder than words, and your actions are always taking you back to him...

[dude I'm getting freakin WHIPLASH trying to keep up with us!][Tamsy I probably won't be on too much longer after this - going out tonight ]

*his admission hangs thick in the air between them, and to her it feels tangible as a wall separating them. she can't hide her shock. inside she'd been desperately clinging to the hope that she was wrong, stupid, paranoid, but that pathetic hope crumbles before her eyes. she takes in a handful of deep, shuddering breaths, hating herself for letting him see her cry because now she knows - he doesn't love her as much as she does him. and it galls her how casual he is with her feelings, with his own, even with Snape's. He'd marked her! He'd promised himself to her forever and now she can see how foolish she was to trust in that. his definition of 'forever' was clearly vastly different to hers*

It's him, isn't it? It's always going to be him. Not me.

*she makes a valiant attempt to hold onto her dignity, clothing sticking to her and hair plastered all over her head, and squares her shoulders*

Fine. Go on then. Don't hold back on my account - go to him, that's where you truly want to be!

"Hermione...I..." he didn't know what else to say. He didn't think she'd believe anything he'd say at the moment. He silently slipped out of the tub and stood up. "I'm not going to him. I'll just go be by myself It's better that way I guess no one to hurt. You'll never have to worry about me again." He silently used a quick spell to dry himself and his clothes then turned and left.