Every day is a new day. Live it.

December 2008

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

My favorite part about Christmas is that the kids are here and spend the night and just hang out. Tony and Casey were supposed to go to his parents on Christmas day, but his mom was sick so they didn’t go until Sunday. I felt bad for Joanne, but I was happy that the kids were able to stay for Christmas Day. Yeah…there’s that selfish thing coming out in me. I was still napping a lot, but we did get time to play games and have some fun! Tony taught us a new card game that was really fun…I’m sure we’ll be playing that again! And we always have to play a few games of Blokus! We love to play Catan, but Tony packed it away before they left for Europe and would have had to tear the whole storage room apart to find it, so we weren’t able to play that. Oh well.

Carly wore the “Christmas jammies”…Brian’s prized possession! Wonder who will wear them next year????

And, a little more of Brian’s humor: He bought each of us “special” Christmas gift. Jalepeno stuffed olives for me, garlic stuffed mushrooms for Casey and Tony and the HUGEST pickles for Carly. I don’t know what triggers that brain of his. It was fun though! (And the olives are really, really tasty!)

Monday, December 29, 2008

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I thought my recovery from surgery was going pretty well. It has been two weeks (Friday) since I had surgery and I finally decided to try to get out and move around a little. Brian and I went to the mall…JC Penney’s only, then while walking to the car stopped for supper at Grizzly’s. I felt pretty good, so we decided to go to Shopko (I was looking for curtains for my bedroom…which I did find, by the way!). When we got home I was plenty tired, but happy with my progress, thinking that it was pretty great that two weeks out of major surgery I was able to spend several hours shopping, and that driving in the car did not bother me that much. Yay for me!

But then I paid. I was sitting at the computer and bent over to pick up something off the floor and I felt something rip…ouch. Yes, it was my incision that had ripped completely open from 1/3 from the top of the incision all the way to the bottom. (Probably about 6-7 inches) CRAP. It was completely open. I didn’t really know what to do. I went upstairs and got gauze (which the doctor happened to give me the day before when I got my staples out), held it firmly on my stomach, sat down and prayed. God, what do I do now? I finally got Casey up (by now it was 1:30 a.m.) and had her take a look at it. She said…”Mom…we need to take you to ER”. That was the LAST place I wanted to go. I tried to convince them (by now Tony came up as well) that I could just sit and wait until morning and go to my clinic, but they would not hear of it. After more than an hour on the phone between St. Cloud ER, my clinic, and the U of M where I had my surgery, we finally headed for the hospital. By the time we arrived it was probably almost 4 a.m. I really expected to spend several hours there…possibly until 10 or 11 a.m. (The reason I didn’t want to go in the first place.) But as soon as I walked in the door, the admitting nurse, receptionist, check nurse, doctor and surgeon on call were so attentive, quick, efficient and helpful that we spent little more than an hour there and we were on our way home again. “Halo’s” to St. Cloud Hospital! My best experience there ever!

My biggest fear was that I would have to go in to surgery again. My second fear was (the pain of) having to get stitches along the entire incision. But as I learned from the doc, they cannot stitch it back up, because there is too great a possibility of infection…almost guaranteed. So they simply put in one stitch on top to prevent it from opening any farther, packed it with gauze, covered it with a bandage and sent me home.

And now, here I am…afraid to move, sit, walk fearing that my whole insides are going to fall out! Sorry if that’s too graphic for you, but I don’t know how else to explain it. It is really weird to have this gaping opening, but we have to just leave it for now and let it heal on it’s own. I don’t return to see my surgeon until January 8th, but the docs in St. Cloud are aware of that and said I just have to leave it for now. (Isn’t that weird?) I’ve continued back on my pain meds…not a full dose…trying to wean myself off of them, and only taking them whenever necessary.

So, in the whole scheme of things, where does this experience leave me?

When I first learned of the cancer, God led me to 1 Peter 5:6-10:

“Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.”(Underlining mine, there’s the promise)

Through all of this I have never faltered in my faith and trust in God. And I never will! I know that God will protect me and keep me safe. And I know the enemy prowls after me looking for someone to devour! But he will NOT have the victory. I am standing firm in my faith (as God instructs me to do) and I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God will restore me and make me strong, firm and steadfast. HE TOLD ME SO, and God never goes back on his promises.

Do I mind cancer? Surgery? Set-backs? YES, YES, YES! I do mind. But because of the promise God gave me several months ago, I know that in the end I will have a sweet victory. I asked God to let my experience witness to someone else who is going through something equally as painful, that I may share the Gospel of the truth of Jesus Christ. I asked God to “use me” and if this is what He wants from me, then please join with me in prayer that I will be obedient to him and bring glory to God from this.

I have never been so touched by the generosity and love from so many people through this experience. People calling with encouragement, bringing food (our freezer is still full!), the group of ladies who came to my house to pray with me, Pastor Denny coming to pray with me at the hospital, Pastor Chuck bringing his whole family to visit me and pray with me in the hospital, the continued “check up” calls that I am still getting, the generosity and care giving from my family. It has all been overwhelmingly appreciated! I am so proud of the amazing people who step forward when there is a need…I know these same people do this for many others as well, not just me. It as taught me that I need to reach out as well, how much it means to one who needs help and comfort and that each of us has a certain area of gifting that we can give to others. I continue to pray blessings on each and every one who has helped me in any way…and I ask God to bless the many who have prayed or helped even though I don’t even know about them…God knows who you are, and he will bless you.

God said he will make me “strong, firm and steadfast”, and I give the Lord praises in advance for all that He will accomplish in me.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

I haven’t blogged for awhile for a number of reasons, but I am happy to say I’M BACK! This actually is a whole new format and link to my blog, so we’ll see how it goes!

On December 10th, Casey and Tony returned home from a 4 month study abroad in Europe. They had so many amazing opportunities to visit many different countries from England and Scotland to Spain, Italy, Turkey and more! I am so thankful that they were able to take this amazing trip, but even more thankful to have them back home again! It just wouldn’t be Christmas without them!

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Yesterday Brian went out and got a tree. For years and years we have gone out and cut our own tree, but this year we decided to go purchase one. Brian picked a tree out from Home Depot...at a very decent price. This tree, however, held no promises sitting on the lot, all bundled up and frozen stiff. But "taking a chance" is the price you pay when you buy tree off the lot instead of cutting it yourself, so take a chance we did...

Well, we'll have to make due with what we have! In just an hour the tree thawed out and started to really look like a Christmas tree! So, Brian began to put on the lights...

Once the lights were on I began to decorate while Brian made our traditional hors d'oeuvres for our "decorating party." We really missed having Casey and Tony there, but Carly came and so it was nice to have her here. I like the way the tree turned out and it makes the whole house feel festive. I love this time of year, and especially this year, today helped to take away a little of the stress and anxiety that's been going on in my life. It made today a very special day (and if I wouldn't have been sick it would have been even better! Oh well.)

So, we start to celebrate this glorious season...the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ. I hope and pray that it will be an amazing, faith building season for all of you and your families and friends. I know that for me this Christmas, like others, offers a season of hope and joy, no matter what the condition of our economy, our personal finances, health, moods and the world throw at us! Bless each of you and have a wonderful holiday season!

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Brian, Carly and I took a little drive to Kay's house (Brian's sister) in Chanhassen to look at and purchase a painting! Kay has been painting for years, and we just love having art work from family. Carly bought a beautiful painting of Venice, and I saw this one that I really liked. I had actually seen it last summer and liked it alot, but was not in the market at the time. But this time we did purchase and hung it as soon as we got home. I really like it as it reminds me of our own neighborhood. It is so fun to display Kay's work in our home. We have other work of Kay's as well but I think this is definitely my favorite! Thanks, Kay!

Monday, December 01, 2008

Twilight is the time before sunrise (dawn), and the time after sunset (dusk). Sunlight scattered in the upper atmosphere illuminates the lower atmosphere, and the surface of the Earth is not completely lit or completely dark. The sun itself is not actually visible because it has not yet come over the horizon (sunrise) or it has passed below the horizon (sunset).

Twilight is specifically defined as the period before daytime or after nighttime during which it is possible to conduct outdoor activities without the aid of artificial light. Due to the unusual, romantic quality of the ambient light this time of day is considered special, and is refered to as the "the blue hour", after the French expression l'heure bleue.

In Scotland this time of day and the attendant light quality is known as gloaming.