Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. We spent the time of her birth with Ellie in the Memorial Garden and sang to her. Now we are going through the happier memories of when she was doing so well. I have just put some photos on yahoo, and Im hoping the link will work...

Thank you for writing that post. It will help me along when the one yr anniversary comes up in about a mth and a half. I often wonder what it will be like and I know memories will come flooding in starting at the time I was put the first time in the hospital and to the incident. I will be praying for you. C

Sue,
I feel for you so much because I remember my own heartbreak at losing my son. I was just thinking today that my son's birthday (Seth) is coming up in 5 weeks. I'm not sure how I'll do. I'm thinking I might take that day off from work. Seth was born 1 day shy of 27 weeks. He went through the roller-coaster of the NICU, barely surviving severe pnemonias, two staff infections, double hernia surgery, and multiple respiratory infections. In his 5-1/2 month life, he never made it off of the ventilator for more than a few days. He died in February (the night before Valentine's Day) from Chronic Lung Disease. I know that Valentine's Day will never be the same for me.

I remember in his 2nd month getting a call at 11 p.m. from the NICU telling me Seth had pnemonia and wasn't responding to the ventilator. When we arrived at the hospital, the Docotor told us that Seth wouldn't live till the morning. We sat with him all night while his blood pressure and blood oxygen levels were unbelievable low. He pulled through for us that night and lived another 3 months. I was always scared to answer the phone after that, especially at night. It's hard to believe how much one phone call can change your life!

Sue, I just wish there was something I could say to comfort you, but words seem to come up short. I am so sorry you got preeclampsia and lost your precious little girl to NEC. I do believe we can draw strength from others who have had similar experiences, because we understand better and more fully than anyone else. I hope you got through today okay and will do even better in the weeks to come.

My thoughts are with you through this tough time. It is hard to keep those memories from playing in our heads. For me, not being able to say "this time last year I was pregnant" has helped as Will's bday passed earlier this month.

Our own birthdays are hard as well, but my husband always tells me how happy he is that I am still here with him to have a birthday to celebrate.

I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers this week. Zach's birthday is tomorrow and I can absolutely relate to your feelings of numbness. I have broken down a couple of times but for the most part, I just feel numb, like I'm just watching life go by right now...

I don't know how to make it any easier, I wish I could. Just know that I will keep you close at heart.

Oh Sue ~ I am sending all the peace I possibly could at this difficult time. HUGS. We have such similar stories. I will be saying lots of prayers for you over the next days that Ellie gives you some peace.