Instagram is ruining my relationship. My GF loves Instagram about as much as she loves to work out. Although I don't think the word "humble" is in her vocabulary, she has always been in great shape. As far as I can tell, she just doesn't realize how much her photos really affect me. She would be pissed if the tables were turned.

I haven't confronted her about it yet because I happen to be out of town. She tells me she's the jealous type. Yet, she is constantly posting photos of herself more than half naked, usually bra & panties. She's always flexin', showin her ass... and five seconds later she's got 70 likes and she's replying to almost every message, even when it's just a guy who's like, "Dat ass!"

She always tells me she loves me, but sometimes she makes it damn hard to believe. And what got me going today is when my family asked to see photos of her and I flipped through her last 150 pictures and couldn't find a single one that was appropriate enough to even show them. Today I commented on a photo of her in some new jeans she posted, which happened to be a better version of the exact photo she had just texted me. So naturally I inquired as to why Instagram got the better quality shot and not me? Well not long after, I noticed she was busy answering other comments and mine had been erased. She says she erased my comment because it had nothing to do with the photo, yet here stands the "dat ass" comment for all to see. Sorry for ranting, I probably sound stupid. But seriously, you men out there shruggin' this shit off like it's nothing need to get a grip on reality. You may not be physically cheating, but that doesn't mean you aren't emotionally depriving your other half of the respect they deserve as your partner.

Un-liking Instagram

Dear Un-liking,

Millions of people use Facebook and Instagram to get validation from other people, to make themselves feel worthy and beautiful (usually because they don't feel that way themselves... or maybe just because it's nice to hear "you look great!" from time to time; after all, who doesn't like compliments?). It's not right or wrong -- it just is what it is. Now, constant pics of your girlfriend in her bra and panties for everyone to see can be a bit much, especially since it's supposed to just be you who sees her in an intimate way. Your frustration is completely understandable. You feel as though your girlfriend shouldn't be flaunting "dat a**" to the world just to get superficial attention.

I know you feel disrespected, but try not to take her behavior as a personal attack against you. I'm not saying her behavior is OK, but realize it's not about you. I'M GOING TO SAY THIS AGAIN (because people usually miss this part) -- her photo posts are NOT about YOU. What she is focused on is how much validation she can get through her collection of compliments from the "Instagram world" (hence why your non-compliment got erased and the "Dat a**!" comment stayed). So, what you need to ask yourself is: do you really love this girl? If you love her, then you have to love all her flaws, including her intense need for self-validation via scantily clad photos of herself. Or, is her behavior so far from what you hold as morally right, respectful, classy, etc. that you can't be with her? Only you know what's right for you.

You won't be able to change her. So, don't even try. Focus on you and decide what you can live with and without.

xo,Natalisep.s. Listen to Hot Chelle Rae's "Why Don't You Love Me" feat. Demi Lovato. Just because someone says they love you doesn't mean they love you in the way you need or want...