Ladies and gentlemen, this might be the most ridiculous and bone-headed Detroit ambulance story yet. It started two weeks ago when a house caught on fire. An old cripple man lived inside. They brought him outside. He was in his underwear. It was cold. He was shivering. You give him a blanket, right? Right. Then guess what happened?

“I’m being punished for giving a man a blanket,” said paramedic Jeff Gaglio.

Who’s punishing him?

“The chief of EMS Jerald James.”

“We can’t have an employee who feels that they have a right to give away state property, be it donated, be it a blanket, be it a tire off a vehicle, without getting prior approval from somebody or notifying the proper authority. This is what he did,” James said by phone.

We’re going to let old cripple guys shiver to death. We’re going to take much needed paramedics off the street. I think what the fire department should do is point those hoses right at headquarters and clean the whole joint out.