“Do you think falling from such high, socially enviable, secure (seemingly) positions has changed you life goals, or your value of those positions?”

I want to reply:

Do you mean – do I feel as though I missed out on so many things that most people do in their youth because I wanted to get into law enforcement?

Are you asking if I regret not misbehaving or getting into trouble or experimenting with drugs because I refused to jeopardize my shot at my goal?

Is the purpose of the question to determine if I was crestfallen to learn that my record prior to the age of 18 would’ve had no effect?

Or that no one believed I never experimented with drugs or even drank or smoked underage?

Or that my bosses did all the things I thought would hobble my efforts (and more) and had not only done my job but advanced far beyond me?

Is the interrogative aimed at discovering the degree to which I fell into depression once I realized I was twice as smart as (if not more than) the vast majority of my co-workers or my supervisors (especially my supervisors)?

Or my sorrow at being fired for “incompetence” even though I’d written the tests they use, I created the interviewing techniques they adopted and I coined the terminology that they “borrowed” when completing memos?

Or my suicidal behavior upon realizing that lofty and high-paid positions rarely involve merit – rather the ability to maintain the status quo, to shut up and do as one is told?

Or is the real question:

Am I utterly despondent at learning the nigh on impossible standards I set for myself – and achieved – were shared by no one I’d ever met yet I was ousted in disgrace thus rendering my almost monastic self-discipline during my youth needless and, worse yet, pointless?

It may seem, to many, an inconsistency why men that write/perform weepy love songs of loss and pain get more kitty than the SPCA.

Well, to my few loyal readers, I’m going to tell you why that is.

1} Preselection = The musicians are stating clearly, sans braggadocio, that they can get – and have gotten – women. The self–effacing delivery actually bolsters credibility in certain circumstances and art is one of them.

2} Every woman sees herself in every other. They are built that way. Therefore, she sees that if one woman won the artist’s heart so deeply and powerfully, she could, too.

3} The song and its message demonstrate the capability and willingness of the artist to heavily invest emotionally in a woman while not professing such obsequiously and directly to the female listener. This indirect method is the very way women communicate, thus it is immediately understood.

In short, wise musicians know that the songs of unrequited love they pen and perform are never Truly for the woman that inspired them.

The enchanting [I choose that word very carefully] melodies are, in reality, for the next beautiful, young woman to come along.

So they use as many easily observable characteristics as possible to make quicken and simplify the selection process.

What it took me way too long to figure out (for which, once more, I blame my mother) is:

If a man wants a certain type of woman he needs to dress as though he’s her type of mate.

This seems basic (and it is) but it’s staggering how many guys don’t get it.

If you want Goth girls, you’ve got to dress Goth.

If you want fashionable girls, dress in the latest styles.

If you want country girls, dress country.

Silly to say it, but in this day and age, it needs to be said.

As far as grooming goes:

1} Hygiene above all.

2} If you want a mustache, there’s a great deal that must go with it; it must be full, thick and end where the lower lip begins. Also, your hair must be cut short at the sides and back (though not buzz–cut) while being longer (2-3”) on the top and combed back. You should also be about 30 or older, and generally dress professionally/business casually. Also, you must be clean-shaven, otherwise; no 5 o’clock shadow. Be sure your clothes are classic, if not in-style, so as to not be a used car salesman. Lastly, and most importantly, you must go all-in with it. Ignore comments mocking it or asking you to shave. Do not try to win approval for it. Prove you are wearing it for you and will not be around people that want you to change it. That’s how Tom Selleck does it.

2} Goatees = are worn and tired. However, if you’re balding badly and have a weak chin, absolutely grow one. Again, you must be clean-shaven, otherwise; no 5 o’clock shadow. Your head should also be shaved very, very regularly and thoroughly. Be sure to use sunscreen all over your head and be sure to get plenty of sun year ’round, so as to not be too pasty. Learn to trim your goatee with meticulous precision.

3} Long hair = be acne free, an appropriate weight and do not wear glasses. (Yes, I am breaking the last two rules, as I’m a little overweight and can’t afford contacts at the moment, and I am wrong. I am working to change that.) Don’t dress outlandishly but be sure to dress with an edge. Don’t have a mustache, goatee or beard with it. It’s too much at that point (although, you can go for the Lemmy look but you’d best be bad-ass enough to pull it off). No gaming t-shirts or anything that screams “nerd”. Far too many computer guys and geeks think long hair makes them cool; it doesn’t. Instead, it tends to give the impression they’re just too lazy to get a haircut.