The What-If Game, Statuesque

*What if Randy Orton is among those making lots of noise backstage about the preferential treatment received by The Rock, and about The Rock’s swollen physique? I bet Bruno and Dr. Maroon never met The Rock’s pharmacist.

*What if WWE is sick of Orton copping a crap attitude and abusing drugs (performance-enhancing and otherwise)?

*What if WWE is frustrated by Orton’s inability to expand his one-dimensional character? OK, he acts like a snake. What else you got?

*What if WWE feels Orton is past his peak as a performer and draw?

*What if Orton didn’t lose clean to Mark Henry because he’s turning heel and a loss as a babyface won’t matter, but because he’s on his way out of WWE?

*What if Orton gets squashed in the Elimination Chamber?

But wait! There’s more!

*What if Orton shows up on Impact TV in a couple months? He’d fit in perfectly with all the other misfit toys.

The What-If Game! I told you it would be a blast!

BTW, WWE can heel up Mark Henry all it wants. Too late. He’s not a star.

STATUESQUE

The real hero of Bruno Sammartino deigning to enter the WWE Hall of Fame is Triple H. Trips closed a deal that was long thought impossible to make. He’s starting to establish legit credentials for WWE CEO.

One thing could hold Triple H back when he assumes the reins of WWE: He’s not a neurotic sociopath who enjoys and encourages human cockfighting. His brain doesn’t split time between the gutter and locker room. He’s no bully. Paul Levesque, by my limited experience and via others who know him, is a good guy.

The Bruno saga will be told many times between now and WrestleMania, but one part needs confirmed, or at least clarified:

I work in the Pittsburgh media, and very closely with the Pittsburgh Penguins, the hockey club that owns the land the old Civic Arena stood on. I can find no one saying that a statue of Bruno will be built there besides Bruno himself. It seems unlikely that the Penguins would want their statue of legendary player/owner Mario Lemieux compromised by a statue of a fake wrestler nearby.

I could be wrong. Maybe it’s yet to be officially announced. Maybe Bruno scooped the story. But no one seems to know about it.

Maybe a statue of Dusty Rhodes should be erected instead. The biggest wrestling crowd in Civic Arena history was 17,500-plus for the 1987 Bunkhouse Stampede final, won by the American Dream.