Get Tipsy

a blog about stuff related
to drinking and smoking yourself silly.

Happy New Year friends! It’s that time of year when most of us look in the mirror and say, “I really need to get my shit together this year.” My problem is when I tell myself that I am NOT going to do something, I end up doubling down and doing it more. If I put myself on a budget suddenly I have the urge to spend money on the most nonsensical crap. Yes, I do need tap shoes even though I am not taking a dance class and I don’t know how to tap dance. If I announce that I am going to eat clean for a month the Domino’s Pizza delivery driver will soon tell me about his new girlfriend due t

In an effort to do something special for customers, RollnUp Smoke Shop and Liquor and Outlaw Motorsports of Harrisburg teamed up to give away a new Honda Pioneer Side-by- Side to one lucky winner. After a summer of entries at RollnUp’s 13 locations around Southern Illinois, Jacquie Glasco was randomly selected as the recipient of the keys.

If you receive an email from my co-worker Joe, at the end of his emails he informs you on what is being celebrated that day. Joe may be informing stores about a price increase on a cigar, but he will also let staff know it is National Donut Day. After seeing the menagerie of different holidays over various emails I decided to look up what May has in store. Maybe these bullshit holidays will help me sell more, it has worked for Hallmark!

Overall the first part of the year blows. The weather sucks, the holidays are over, you have already given up on your New Year’s Resolution (me too & no judgment here), and we are long way from spring. Do you feel depressed yet? Turn that frown upside down friends, I have a plan to get you through.

Back in the day it was the norm to serve guests a digestif, better known as an after dinner cocktail, to help with digestion. After eating a shit ton of food over Thanksgiving I felt the need to bring back this practice. Determine how you feel after a meal and pick a digestif that will not only taste good, but help you feel better.

Bloated?

Welcome to autumn friends. Bust out your chunky knit drinking poncho and let’s discuss all the fun trends that surround this short lived season. The fall months deliver a cornucopia of seasonal flavored beers and liquors. Pumpkin spiced rum, apple IPA, honey berry bourbon…it starts to look like a menu at a progressive amish farmers’ market. Fall also brings many day drinking opportunities, that alone makes this season not terrible. I think there are some try worthy new arrivals in liquor, wine, and beer this season.

April always seems like the month where you are reminded to “Spring Clean”. As usual my family isn’t traveling anywhere for spring break, so with all my free time I figured I would get my shit together and get organized before summer arrives. I started in my pantry and that turned very depressing very quickly. I always have the best intentions to bake birthdays cakes for friends, family, and co-workers, but after throwing out 8 boxes of expired Betty Crocker Fluffy Cake Mix it is time to admit to myself that I am not baking a damn thing!

Chances are if you were born between 1960 and 1980 you drink or used to drink soda; but when it comes to alcohol you traded in your Captain & Coke or Vodka & enter any soda, juice, or energy drink here. We all grew up, kinda, and research and market trends show that our tastes have changed. The beer guzzling friends that would drink any brand as long as it was cheap, are now fine bourbon connoisseurs and amateur wine sommeliers.

On December 31st we usually celebrate the tradition of getting together with friends and bidding the year farewell! Unfortunately I tend to have unrealistic expectations for NYE. I always envision a gorgeous evening filled with great food and cocktails. After a night of dancing and laughs my husband will kiss me at midnight, a perfect end to a perfect evening. The reality is I usually have a full blown five alarm melt down in my closet when I have nothing to wear…or nothing fits (thanks so much Christmas Cookies).

Talks between my husband and I over a holiday schedule is comparable to UN negotiations. They can sometimes go smoothly and other times cause threat of war and trade embargoes. I find it difficult to blend his families traditions with mine. His folks live five hours away so we can’t do the “lunch at your parents and dinner at mine” action. His family has large gatherings, while my side is very low key. It is funny how even little things one family does can be outright bizarre to another.