While watching this movie, I’ve thought a lot about just how much of a mess Alan Rickman’s office is, but I hadn’t considered what that office is actually supposed to be. So I paid close attention and figured it out.

And it made everything SO MUCH WORSE.

Alan Rickman’s office is an organization called Fairtrade, filled with posters that say “shopping that saves lives…”

…and “help shoulder their burden.”

So their nonstop boss-employee fuckfesting, puppy dog eyes-ing, and institutionalized-brother calling all happens in a company purportedly seeking to help people in the developing world, often survivors of human trafficking, and both the company and the movie itself diminishes that mission to very literal background noise in favor of very literal white people problems. THIS IS SOME COLONIAL-ASS SHIT.

Beyond that, we don’t know much about this company or anyone’s jobs. Hot Karl is the chief designer. We know because Alan Rickman refers to him as “Karl, our enigmatic chief designer.” Mia is Alan Rickman’s assistant. Laura Linney…exists there. At all hours. Sometimes Garbage Colin brings muffins and no one seems to want one, which must be some kind of cultural difference, because never in the history of America has any American office worker turned down a muffin.

Also, they employ a man called Kevin, who fondles women’s breasts and retains employment.

I’m amazed he didn’t get a glowing segment of his own where he flies to Ohio and fucks Jessica Biel or Jessica Alba or some other early aughts Jessica.

So yes, not only is Alan Rickman an absolute mess of a boss, but he’s being an absolute mess of a boss AT A COMPANY DEDICATED TO PREVENTING HUMAN TRAFFICKING.

Don’t worry, good people in developing nations. Your literal livelihoods are safe in the hands of Alan Rickman, Sex Robot Mia, and SOME PERV NAMED KEVIN.