Drop-Down Menu

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

I've talked a bit (a lot) about the challenges in parenting Carys right now, namely that she's Almost Three. Testing boundaries is like her day job at the moment.

But I don't know if I've mentioned enough how incredibly sweet and funny she's also been during this time of testing. There are so many times during the day that I just want to scoop her up and squeeze her (and usually do) and my heart actually literally feels like it might explode from all The Feels I'm having.

This morning, for instance, I wasn't feeling well, and she ran to my side and rubbed my back and told me it would be okay and got me a pillow and asked if I needed anything. She kept asking if I was hurting and giving me hugs and was so concerned. If I'm crying for some reason, she genuinely feels it and wants me to feel better. If a friend is hurt, she offers hugs. She gets sad when there is trash on the ground, because it makes the animals sad, but is delighted when she can pick it up to "help the earth."

Her face just lights up the room when she smiles. Her happy is my happy. And her dad's. And her Nana's. And her Kimber's. And anyone else who interacts with her. She can just be the greatest joy to be around and can instantly brighten a bad day. And the best part is that she wants to share that joy with everyone, whether it's the excitement of wearing Frozen underwear (awkward around strangers) or a new toy or just that it's raining outside and she loves the rain - it's not unusual for her to try to share whatever is making her happy at the moment with whoever is with her. Even if that person is just passing us in a Target aisle.

She wants baby sister included in everything and spends hours each day fawning over Emmeline. "Baby sister, do you see my book? Baby Emmeline, look at the bird! Baby sister, you can have some of my ice cream when you get bigger." Sometimes she tries to love on her a little too much, but the bond that they already share is far greater than what I could have imagined would develop in a short four months. They are each other's sunshine. Emmeline lights up when she sees Carys, and Carys lights up when she sees Emmeline.

She's just such a really, really great kid, and sometimes in the midst of a bizarre tantrum over something that I'd consider small, it's hard to remember the bigger picture and that she's just a little kid. She's trying as hard as she can. I also saw something that stuck with me that reminded parents that we certainly aren't expected to be happy all the time and to never be upset, yet we often expect that of our young children. I've redoubled my effort over the last week or so to remember that and to respond calmly with empathy and love, and I've been reminding her that I love her and that she's a good kid even if I don't like what she's doing. I've also been working hard on rephrasing my "nos" to "yeses." If I feel a harsh tone coming out, I'll take a breath and try again. These are things that I've always done, but I've intensified my efforts to do them every. single. time. with consistency. And I've seen small gains as a results: fewer tantrums and faster calming. As a result of that, I've felt calmer as well, and more connected to her than ever before.

Friday, April 25, 2014

Did I ever mention here that "Elsa" was one of our top names for Emmeline? Way before the movie came out, obviously. One of the reasons we discarded it was because it was the name of one of my grandmother's cats, but I remember after taking Carys to see Frozen at the beginning of December wondering if having the character in the movie named Elsa meant it would soon be ubiquitous and known primarily for that character. I also remember kind of dismissing that thought because, "...how big could that movie really get?"

Little did I know that it would become Carys's favorite movie and that she would be all Elsa (and Anna) all the time. And that Frozen-branded stuff would be everywhere, and that Elsa would be everyone's favorite character. And that had I used the name Elsa, I'm sure I would have gotten, "Like the movie?" every time I said her name.

To force a segue that only kind of works, I've been kind of feeling isolated lately. (It works, okay, because I can't hear the word "isolation" without immediately breaking out into song: "A kingdom of isolation...and it looks like I'm the queen.") (I KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE!)

My mom moved to a small city (for work) about a six hour drive from me the year Carys was born. If you know me or my mom, she's my rock and a very real part of my soul. It has been incredibly hard having her away. Incredibly hard, as in I'm tearing up just writing it out. And it hasn't gotten any easier 2.5 years later. When I think of her permanently moving, which I know is always a possibility, my heart just shatters. At least now, she can come home whenever since my dad is here in their local house, and at least now I know I have every summer with her. But if she moves, I can't imagine being in a hotel for three months straight to visit for the entire summer.

And now my youngest sister is gearing up to move to California, which is literally halfway across the country. She's leaving in August. She was my little tag-along sister who drove me batshit insane because she constantly wanted to copy everything I did, but now she's the one I want to copy. She's one of my very best friends now, and generally my default answer to "Who can I hang out with tonight? I'm bored." Carys absolutely adores her and I've been so excited to see her and Emmeline develop that special bond as well - and now that she's moving when Em is so young, it won't be the same. Sure, she'll come back a couple times a year, and there's video chat, but it's not the same as seeing someone in person every week. And Carys is so little that their special bond won't be maintained either - she won't remember what it's like to have Kimber in her weekly (if not daily) life.

And now I'm crying about it. Again. Sigh. I'm such a wuss. GET IT TOGETHER, GIRL.

It feels like my entire support system is crumbling around me.

Don't you love how I can take major events in other people's lives and make it ALL ABOUT ME?

I always thought I was pretty flexible and change didn't affect me much, but these two events have proven me way wrong and it's really thrown me for a loop.

I don't want to discount the friends and family I do have locally - another sister, who is wonderful, and a brother, who is also wonderful. I just don't see them as much as I did Kimberly, unfortunately. And my dad is fantastic and always available, but he'd be the first to admit he's no mom. No one can nurture quite like my mom can. And most of my closest friends are away, too: one of my very best mom friends moved about four hours away, another is two hours away, and another four hours away. In our large group of local friends, most aren't married and don't have kids. I have a few good friends left in the area, though, and I'll need to make a concerted effort to see them more often in order to combat the loneliness I know is going to hit me once Kimber's outta here. And I'll need to make an effort to expand my horizons and ugh, make new friends, which is always awkward and weird when you're an adult. Anyone want to be my new best friend? Applications accepted.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

I've gone climbing...four?...times since last posting about it. Maybe five, six? Hot damn, I've reached the point where I've gone enough they all are blending together! Achievement level unlocked.

When we went a few weeks ago, Jenna was bouldering and crushing it, until she landed wrong (the crash pad wasn't squarely under her) and hit her heel on the mat, so she's been out for the count. Sad, because she's by far the best at bouldering and I love watching her. Also, she was doing really great before she fell (evidence here), and once you fall (even a little) you really get nervous and cautious the next time you climb. Her leg has been bothering her since the fall, but she had an appointment to get it checked out and found out it was just a bruised tendon (we'd been worried she had a hairline fracture or something). Last Wednesday was the first day she felt comfortable enough to get back on the rocks, so it was great to have her back in action.

I got over a hump and was able to top one route that I'd been working on forever (and have since done it two more times) as well as a few other routes that were at my 5.8 level - the three pictured below plus one other one (that I cheated on the first time up using a foothold that wasn't mine, but went back up and got past that part without cheating). I was crazy excited, because I topped three different routes in one night and that was a personal best for me. I'm now working on two routes that are proving really hard for me thanks to an almost total lack of upper body strength. One route, that we call "the red route" because we're SO CREATIVE and the tape marking it is red), is a strange route that you have to climb with your feet on one wall and your hands on another and it's super awkward and I can't quite figure it out. I also got another route - another 5.8 - that I only got with a healthy amount of help from my belayer. I'm still proud as shit that I got it, but she definitely hefted me up to help me get a couple of the handholds. (Although she immediately discounted the climb entirely by telling me how much I cheated by relying on her and gave me zero credit for effort. Hint: Next time, say, "Great job! Next time you try it, let's try it with more slack!" or "Next time you try it, I bet you won't even need my help!" Positive reinforcement! haha)

I'm not sure how well you'll be able to see the routes here, but three of the ones I got were the white one in the top left, the yellow one in the top right, and the teal one on the bottom picture.

Some random guy transversing the wall (going across the wall laterally, not too far off the ground - and MUCH harder than it looks since you are constantly crossing your hands and feet).

I also topped three bouldering routes - the V01 I was working on before (V0 being the absolute easiest and V1 being the next step, so V01 is somewhere between the two) as well as two new ones, both V1s. I think. One might have been another V01.

When I got the V01 that I'd been working on for ages, Kimberly was helping another climber and I was just practicing that one move needed to get it. I GOT IT and was SO excited to keep climbing up, only to realize that there was no crash pad under me (since the move I was working on was relatively low to the ground). So I had to drop down, move the crash pad, and do it all over again. This time with everyone staring at me, since I'd yelped so loudly when I'd gotten the move.

I can slowly feel myself getting stronger, but not as fast as I'd like. I'd probably help if I did somethinganything other than just this for a workout, but I don't. Or if, you know, I stopped eating a gallon of ice cream a day. (but I'm a nursing mom!)(I say to myself) It'd also help immensely if I could get out to climb more than once a week. My sisters go twice a week, generally, and I'm usually only able to go with them one of those nights since I work the other day they go and climbing with me isn't enough of an incentive to get my other sister to change her grocery shopping schedule to accommodate me. I kid, I kid. Mostly.

To end, this is what the gym looks like when they're closing up and tying the ropes up to get them out of the way and off the floor so they can sweet. Doesn't it look like a little forest of nooses? I'm always vaguely creeped out by it.

Monday, April 21, 2014

I did it around-the-clock with Carys when I had to supplement
her nursing with a bottle feed, and then for another year at work. I didn’t
mind it too much with Carys, and I don’t mind the actual act of doing it. But
at work, in an attempt to conform to new federal regulations, they now have a “Mother’s
Room” where we can pump. I was SO excited for it when I first heard it was
coming.

And SO let down when I actually used it the first time.

First, it’s a storage room. It’s small. It’s lined in file
cabinets. There’s one small (hard plastic) chair in the middle of the room and
a footstool. And I added the footstool
after taking it from an empty cubicle. No table, no sink, no mini-fridge to
store milk, absolutely nothing for the mother except the chair. I want to be
appreciative of just the fact that we HAVE a room to use, but since it’s
dual-purpose, I have to announce my intention to go in and pump to a room full
of people (luckily, all women at this point) so if anyone needs anything out of
the room they can go get it. Since I can hear them all talking through the walls,
so I’m paranoid positive they can hear me pumping as well (are all you pumping
mothers picturing that wha-WHA-wha-WHA whirring of the pump now?). Both the
telling-of-the-pumping-intention and the feeling they are listening is so
mortifying. I am proud of the fact that I pump, but let’s be honest here:
pumping is weird and I don’t want anyone to picture me doing it. And to add to
the discomfort, I always feel like it’s such an inconvenience to them whenever
I go down to use the room. Oh, and they won’t let me store my pump there
between sessions, so I have to lug that pump back and forth between my desk and
the room all day. And store my milk in the giant communal freezers shared by
(literally) a thousand other people (though probably only about 400 are here
any given time). Oh, and let’s not forget how I have a short clip of Emmeline
crying to help with let-down that I play – on the lowest volume setting
possible - and one of the ladies outside the office commented
on it as I was leaving, so I KNOW they can hear everything that goes on in
there (which makes me avoid using the highest suction setting since it’s the
loudest).

Since I’ve gone twice only to be told that someone else was
on their way down, I asked for the other person’s schedule so I
could avoid them (we are the only two using it), and wondered if we could create a
sign-up sheet for it. I got zero reply and still have no idea when/if the other
person will be there or not. I asked if we could get a trash can in there
(since when opening the milk storage bags little tabs are ripped off, and since
I eat my lunch while pumping) with no response. I asked if we could get a pack
of sanitizing wipes in the room (to clean up any tiny stray drops) with no
response. I’d like to ask if we can at least get a poster on the wall, to make
it just slightly less “I’m pumping in a storage room” and more “I’m pumping in
a room that just happens to have some file cabinets in it” but if they can’t
get a trash can, I’m sure that asking for a poster would be akin to asking for
a Lazy-Boy Recliner. Which, please note, would also be nice.

The one thing I WILL give them credit for is calling it a "Mother's Room" instead of a "Lactation Room," which is what some places call it. Because nope. There is very little that ruins the joy and magic of nursing and breastfeeding like the word lactation. Lactate. Lactating. Nope, nope, nope.

I get that space is at a premium for most companies and that
a nice, dedicated nursing room might not be possible, but I also feel like on
an effort scale of 1 to 10, they in about a half point. Dude, pumping sucks.
Almost no one likes doing it. If we have to be hooked up to a milking machine
like a frigging cow, at least don’t make it worse with a shitty pumping room.

A nice nursing/pumping room would have:

Dedicated space (only used by pumping moms)

Soothing wall color with nice decor

Table so mother can eat while pumping and/or set
her pump on it

Soft, comfortable chair

Footstool

Schedule where you can reserve the room

Trashcan

Sanitizing wipes

Several outlets so the mother can position
herself and the pump in the most comfortable way

A dream pumping room would add:

Sink

Fridge/cooler to store milk away from the masses

Cubbies/cabinets for each pumping mother to
store pump in between sessions

Natural light (from a frosted or high-up window that couldn't be seen into)

Magnetic board where mothers can place pictures of their children to stimulate let-down

While we’re REALLY dreaming, I’ll add:

TV

Space heater or independent climate control –
pumping while cold SUCKS, amirite? Also see that pun? INTENDED.

Upgrade the soft chair to a massage chair (OMG
CAN YOU IMAGINE?)

Paul Rudd

There’s like a negative percent chance that any of that
would ever happen, but maybe I can get a job designing pumping rooms for giant
companies with wads of money. Google. Call me. We’ll do this.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

I rarely post things like this, but had to share this deal. If you're looking for a fun project to do, check this out. Friends of ours did this last year with great results (I was completely skeptical that they would live, but they did!) and I've had it on my Amazon wishlist because Carys was completely enthralled with the whole process and asked to go to their house to check on "her" butterfly babies every single day. So I put it on my wishlist with the intention of grabbing it sometime this summer for a fun short-term project, and just today saw it dropped in price from $16.99 (which is what it's been for months and months now) to $11.89!!!! Needless to say, I jumped on it and since it's so much cheaper than it normally is I wanted to share it with you guys just in case anyone else might be interested. Even when it was listed on Zulily, which normally has pretty great deals (a lot of Carys's clothes and toys are from there), it was going for close to $17.00.

(P.S. You do need to pay $5 for the butterflies once you get the kit.)

Note: I paid full retail for this! I have no idea if it's going to be awesome or a dud (hopefully awesome like our friends' was) but this isn't a sponsored or paid post or anything. Just me being excited over a deal!

UPDATE: I see it's jumped a dollar in price up to $12.89. Still cheaper than the "normal" price it usually goes for but I have no idea if it's worth waiting to see if it drops again or if it's going to shoot up??

Monday, April 14, 2014

Not just dear. Dearest Emmeline. You are SO sweet; my little laid-back munchkin. You go with the flow and don't cry very often and smile all the time. I'm not kidding when I say that everyone that interacts with you comments on how incredibly sweet you are.

Your great-grandma can't get enough of you.

You're getting so big - at your four month appointment on Thursday, you were 16lbs., 3oz., and just under 27 inches long. I missed your exact head measurement (mom fail) but it was the 88th percentile - no surprise there, because you have the biggest, roundest head this side of the Mississippi. And the biggest, roundest eyes. And the biggest, roundest cheeks. And hand dimples. And wrist folds. And thigh rolls. And everything about you is just pinch-able perfection.

And your dimples. They deserve their own paragraph. They are just the best. I could pretty much subsist solely off of your dimples.

Your hair is coming in white blonde (!!!!) and your eyes are still a deep blue (to compare: Carys's hair came in dark blonde and her eyes were deep blue until a little over a year old; they are now solidly hazel). I am so very curious to see what you look like when you get bigger - I just cannot picture you as anything other than my chubby baby. I love to rub your fuzzy little head - so very soft. But then I stop because I'm worried about rubbing off what little hair you have. Right now, you've the little bald spot in the back of your head that some babies get, with the little fringe at the nape of your neck. But you're mostly bald. Adorably bald.

You've begun babbling constantly, in this gutteral gurgle-y voice. And you will talk and talk and talk. And you love it when we talk back to you

You also have your hands in your mouth about 90% of the time you're awake. One or two fingers or the whole fist, it doesn't matter.

I think you're about a week from legit sitting up on your own, which is terrifying - it's too early! You aren't that big yet! But you already tripod sit for a few seconds at a time (before folding on yourself and touching your head to your toes).

You are about a centimeter away from rolling from your back to your tummy - you just haven't quite figured out what to do with that pesky bottom arm yet. (Tummy to back is ages away, it seems - you hate being flat on your tummy for tummy time so you usually do it propped up on a rolled-up blanket or on my stomach, so I anticipate that you won't get that move down for a while.)

I don't know why I find this so charming, but when I lay you down for a nap, instead of stretching your arms out or waving them around like you normally do, you tuck them tight against your side in anticipation of being swaddled.

You JUST started the "pull-off-and-smile-up-at-me" thing while nursing. It makes nursing sessions take longer, but dear lord do I love it.

You and your sister are thick as thieves already. You break out into the widest grin when she is around and will sit and watch her do anything. She just loves to hold and cuddle you (though gets a little frustrated you aren't sturdier when I have to remind her to be gentle), and trying to make you smile is a favorite activity: "Give me a smile, baby!" She loves responding to your babbles with, "Oh, yeah? Tell me more, baby!" and you love talking to her. She shares her toys with you and wants to share her food with you (not quite yet!) and tells you all the time how much she loves you (and also tells me sometimes that she doesn't love anyone but Emmeline - ouch!).

Em, Emmers, Emmy. I love this age where my cheek rests against your whole face and where you can't turn from my kisses and cuddles. I love it when you're tired and you'll tuck your head into my shoulder. I love kissing your cheeks and neck. I love the way you grab at my neckline while nursing. I love the way you sleep next to me, with your face towards me and one hand thrown over my chest.

You get the bum end of the deal sometimes, being the second kid. Some days I want to just hold you the entire time you're sleeping and feel your body heat and feel the weight of you and just BE with you, but I have another kid to feed and clothe and keep alive. But come her bedtime, it's just me and you, kid, and I get to breathe in your essence. I know this time where I can let you sleep on me for hours on end and your tiny body just melts into me is too short and I wish there was a way to capture every moment of this time permanently.

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Did one of you happen to see my sweet little girl? The one who is kind and loving and nice and a good listener?

Because hot damn, I want her back.

Today, at a playdate, my best friend and I were getting ready to leave. We did all the "right" things: we gave warnings, we gave choices, we were loving but firm. And for our troubles, I got a handful of dirt thrown at me and she got an epic tantrum. And I truly believe we are both good moms. Really good moms. We've read the books (I freaking worship Love & Logic*) and gone to the seminars and followed our instincts. And pre-kid me would have judged the shit out of these two moms who couldn't get their two-year-olds to sweetly and obediently leave the park. Because through eight thousand hours of baby-sitting, I never had to live with one of these tiny terrorists.

If I'm being totally honest, I probably would have judged those moms just six months ago, too. I, somewhere deep inside, thought we had gotten off easy, because we had almost none of the "terrible" in terrible twos. There were tantrums here and there but parenting was still easy. Maybe I was just that awesome of a parent? Maybe she was just that awesome of a kid? But as we've gotten closer and closer to three, these glimpses of a child I don't know and at some points don't WANT to know keep appearing.

This age is hard, ya'll. It's like she's suddenly discovered that in her mind, she has all the power. And the problem is, SHE DOES. Because this girl does not give a shit about your discipline techniques. Take toys away? "PSH. I HAVE OTHERS," she says. Time out? "HILARIOUS." Physically forcing her to cooperate? "JUST TRY." She knows all of the exact right things to say to break my heart, all of the exact right things to do (or not do) to test my limits, and all of the exact right attitudes to throw out to make me want to scream. And drink a glass of wine. A big glass.

I am seriously at a loss sometimes as to what to do to combat this...this...toddler. She's just a two-year-old, how is she possibly besting me?!?!?! Theoretically I'm stronger and smarter with better self control. Sometimes I worry I'm raising a little psychopath, until I talk to another toddler parent and am assure that yes, their child too is a violent, whiney little f*ker. I had to use the edited version of that word because I feel bad calling my kid a f*ker, but seriously. Some days.

Carys, if you're 18 and reading this, be assured that I still loved you to freaking bits every single millisecond, you just made me work for it. You're such an amazing kid, truly. You're so smart and funny and strong and such an incredible little girl. And most of the time you are just the sweetest little ball of curly-haired awesomeness and you totally amaze me with the depth of your love.

But.

BUT.

But then I tell you that you can't have ice cream for breakfast and you lose your ever-loving mind. Or I need you to get out of the swing so I can lay baby sister down to sleep and you refuse and you hit me when I pick you up. Or I have the audacity to be sleeping in my own bed when you crawl into it at 6:30 in the morning and MY BLANKET TOUCHES YOU AND YOU ONLY WANT YOUR BLANKET OH THE HORRORS OH THE HUMANITY and you start kicking.

I was just listening to a story on NPR (yes, I'm one of those, sigh) about "Bad Babies" and a Yale researcher said that two is the most violent age and that the only reason the families of two-year-olds survive is because they aren't strong enough and don't have access to lethal weapons. And when I watch this small child flailing on the floor because I picked out the wrong pair of jeans, I kind of think that he's right.

Lucky for her, she also wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me in nose to nose and whispers, "I love you, Mommy." And lucky for her, she randomly tells me, "You're my favorite Mommy." And lucky for her, if I get the tiniest owie, she runs to the freezer to get me an ice pack and smother me in kisses and tell me it will be okay.

Lucky for her, I love the shit out of her for all those reasons and a million more.

(But you're on my list, kid....watch it.)

UPDATE: Hm. I just realized that this post and the "no naps" post go hand-in-hand. Did I just have a parenting breakthrough? I wonder how much of this is caused by being overtired. Probably a lot. Maybe I need to push naps harder or try to get her down to bed earlier. Experiment time!

*Regarding the "Love and Logic" series - not a paid advertisement or anything; it's truly one of my favorite parenting concepts. Big on real-life consequences and acting with empathy and love. I don't agree with every word on the page, but overall one of my favorite parenting books (and I seriously doubt there is any parenting philosophy or book out there that I'd agree with 100% - all kids and all parents and all families are different, obviously, and one book won't cover everything, duh). I have both "Love and Logic for Early Childhood" and the regular "Love and Logic" book, but they cover mostly the same information. I also just got their book about entitlement but haven't read it yet. Seriously, such a great concept.

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Now. I do not claim to be a sewer. I mean, I sew, but I really BARELY know how to use our sewing machine. So probably a hundred things are wrong with these and I used a bing-blong stitch when I should have used a nappy stitch or something. Loose threads everywhere. Uneven hems. Visible threads. Mistakes galore. This is not a professional seamstresses project. I did the best I can. The best I can pretty low on a sliding scale, though.

However. From a distance, they look good. And whenever I post a picture of Carys wearing her capes on Instagram or Facebook. I get questions on how I made them. So maybe there are other non-sewers like me out there who are looking for inspiration for their similarly-obsessed kids.

Like 2/3 of kids under the age of 30, Carys is completely in love with the movie "Frozen." So much so that she has an entire routine for the "Let It Go" song, complete with *exact* choreography and costume changes, which I of course have recorded and uploaded to YouTube and which YouTube promptly blocked since it had the actual "Let It Go" song in the background. (Instagram isn't so picky: Here's a quick clip of her early version - it's become much more sophisticated since then.)

At her second cousin's "Frozen" themed birthday party and in heaven.

Best part of the picture is the kid in the background.

That obsession led to capes. Anything was a cape. Everything was a cape. Towels were capes. Blankets were capes. Coats were capes. My clothes were capes.

I thought it would be a FANTASTIC idea to make her an actual cape like Elsa and Anna have in the movie. Seriously, BEST MOM EVER is what I was going for. I thought she'd flip her lid, especially since she saw the fabric before I did anything with it and knew immediately that it was "Frozen" costume fabric (in the video linked above, she's playing with the raw yardage).

Well, the day I introduced the capes to her (after having SLAVED over them), she was having a terrible day and didn't want anything to do with them. She just went right back to her blanket-cape. I was completely crushed. I did get her friend Leah to wear it, though.

Eventually, Carys did come around to the capes, though, and now they are absolutely required wearing any time we watch the movie and/or just the "Let It Go" song (which is a lot) (like a lot a lot).

ELSA & ANNA'S PURPLE CAPE

I made a kind of Elsa/Anna hybrid cape with a hood, because when she was using blankets as capes, she always gave them a hood. So even though neither Elsa nor Anna have hoods on their capes, I thought she'd appreciate the extra touch. You can easily modify these instructions to do it without the hood.

I also used a shiny fabric that unravels like crazy and is a total bitch to hem. If you are a crappy sewer like I am (or even a non-sewer) you might want to consider using something like a lightweight felt. You won't have to serge or zig-zag stitch the cut seams at all, you won't have to hem, and it will go approximately 124% faster. You also won't have to worry about the "right" and "wrong" side of the fabric since it's the same on both sides (if you're a beginner - the "right" side of the fabric is the side that you want to see; the wrong side is the "inside" of the fabric).

Unfortunately, there aren't really any in-progress pictures like those gorgeous DIYs that most bloggers provide. I had no idea so many people would want instructions, so I didn't take any in-progress pictures. However, I drew out the instructions for a friend and after getting numerous requests for instructions decided to just post those for all to cringe at enjoy. I really don't know if I'm explaining how to do this well; hopefully you can kind of piece it together since my instructions are shit.

I used about a yard of fabric for the purple cape. I got it at Joann's - I just wandered around until I found this fabric that looked like it was the right color. In hindsight, it was kind of a huge bitch to work with.

HOOD:

To create the hood, I took a hoodie that she already owned, laid it down while folded in half, and traced the shape onto paper, then enlarged it a bit to account for seams (so you'll end up with kind of a "D" shaped pattern). Then trace that pattern onto your fabric twice, since you need two hood pieces. Cut two hood pieces.

CAPELET AND CAPE:

Measure your kid from the shoulders to where you want the cape to end (I did calf-length) to determine how long the cape should be. I used a rounded, curved shape for the cape - you could just as easily (actually WAY more easily) do a rectangular shape for yours. I then eyeballed the length of the capelet (the shoulder part) based on the length of the cape. I just drew right on the fabric for the cape since it didn't have to be exact, but you could do it onto a piece of paper first to get the shape exactly right. Don't forget - since the final product will be gathered, the raw pieces should be much wider than you want the final product to be. At least twice as wide. On the final product, the width of the cape (after it's gathered) will be equal to the width of the open hood, so you could use 2x the length of the open hood as a measurement for the width of these pieces. Cut one capelet piece and one cape piece.

CONSTRUCTION:

1. Pin the hood pieces together, wrong sides facing each other. Sew along the curve (see illustration). If needed, you can hem the front of the hood. The bottom of the hood will be sewn to the cape, but if you have a particularly fray-y fabric, you might want to serge or zig-zag the bottom of the hood after you've sewn it together (make sure you do this while the hood is open; you don't want to sew the pieces together along the bottom!).

2. If needed, serge/zig-zag stitch the top of the capelet and cape pieces, and hem the other sides (see illustration). Sew a gathering stitch along the top of each piece and gather them to match the width of the hood and each other. (Not sure how to gather? Check this link.)

3. Lay the capelet on top of the cap, pin in place, and sew them together (both pieces of fabric should be facing the same way - so when you're looking down at it you should see the right side of both pieces).

(What kind of drugs was I on when I wrote step one?

I think I meant "sew hood pieces wrong side together")

4. With your newly sewn cape laying with the right side of the fabric facing up, pin the open hood to the top of the cape. The hood should have the right side facing down. Once pinned, sew across the top to attach the hood to the cape.

5. Cut ribbons to the desired length. If your ribbon will fray, fold the ribbon onto itself and sew across (or go the easy route and paint clear nail polish along the bottom of it, or lightly burn it with a lighter). Sew the ribbons to the inside of the cape on each side. I did it along the seam where the hood and cape met, using a zig-zag stitch and going over it several times so it was secure.

6. I randomly found a button at Joann's that looked a lot like the brooch that is on Elsa's cape, so I bought it and added it to the side of the cape where the ribbon comes out. Totally optional.

Inside of cape showing all the seams. Pretend like this isn't blurry.

Hemming the edge of the cape.

Ribbons folded over and sewn through. I used a decorative stitch and contrasting thread.

The hood looks really tall/long - and it is. I did it that way to get that drape-y effect when worn (see picture of Leah wearing it). Also, is that a crumb on the carpet? Yes.

ELSA'S ICE QUEEN CAPE

Technically, when Elsa transforms into the ice queen (SPOILER ALERT) she isn't wearing a cape; it's actually part of her dress. But for dress-up purposes, this works nicely.

I found a piece of tulle at Joann's that had silver glitter dots all over it. Any type of sheer, sparkly fabric will do nicely. The amount you need will depend on the width of the fabric; I used half a yard, I believe, but it was very wide fabric.

Detail of fabric

This cape is ridiculously easy, because the fabric doesn't need to be hemmed or the edges finished in any way. (Yes, you could get all crazy and use piping around the edges or do a million other things, but I'd just devoted 1/3 of my life to creating the purple cape, and I was spent.)

You need a piece of fabric that's at least as tall as your child (I made mine even longer, to drag on the floor like Elsa's does in the movie) and at least twice as wide as you want the final width, and a piece of ribbon long enough to go across the back of the cape and be tied in front.

1. Sew a gathering stitch across the top of the fabric and gather to desired width.

2. Pin a ribbon across the top of the fabric, with the ends extending out on each side to act as the ties later. Sew in place with a decorative stitch. Finish ends of ribbon if needed (folding it over and stitching shut, or using nail polish or lightly burning the ends).

3. Done. That easy.

I see mistakes in both capes all over the place, but I'm really ridiculously proud of them (especially the purple cape) and Carys absolutely loves them (now. thank god.). And no, there is absolutely zero chance that I'll be selling these on Etsy anytime soon. Doing these two sapped all my sewing ability for the next five years.