You want to know about Narcoxia? Ha. Trust me, kid. You don't. Hell, I wish I had never heard of the place, much less grown up there. Narcoxia is the slimiest locale in the Multiverse. It, quite literally, stinks. They don't even have a concept for crime - because crime for those cretins is existence. It is the very air they breathe. My own mother used to steal my allowance.

Ugh, well, I'll tell you a little. If only to steer you clear of that pit of despair. Here is what you need to know: Narcoxia is a land of addiction. Every person you meet is physically dependent on substances. Oh, yeah? Impossible you say? I've been to the medical centers. I've seen the newborns. Medical professionals crushing up mild colaquestines and mixing them in the solutions. You don't think it happens? All I can tell you is that it does on Narcoxia.

What's the substance? Hell, if only it were just one. Then, maybe - just maybe - I could've helped them. No, friend, there are five substances: Deprevor, Stimilos, Opian, Hallucitrol, and Inhalis. You needn't know which one does what - what I need to tell you, is that you can, by no means, try one. They are all lethally habit-forming. Most of the citizens of Narcoxia have a relationship with several of them. Even those who speak out against the corruption go home to a healthy habit. It's all hypocrisy and lies. These individuals are extremely volatile and unpredictable.

Alright kid, I gotta fly, but remember what I told you. This is not a place you want to build your vacation home. If you got any sense in that pretty little head of yours, you won't even think of going there. But if you do, be careful. Watch yourself. I hope you find what you're looking for.

-Dialogue taken from conversation with Bhikeem, Planeswalker native to Narcoxia.

Narcoxia is a Plane beset. Beset not by devils, nor demons, not tyrants, or poverty, the elements do not wage war on the citizens, and neither is the environment facing demise in the face of machines. Many of the individuals on Narcoxia are quite happy. But those who are not - they have good reason. Narcoxia truly is in the grip of a very powerful plague - one that is almost invisible. Science is the religion of most Narcoxians. And science has proven itself time and time again in this bountiful land - but recently the relationship between the Narcoxians and their Chemical Gods has become strained. Why, one my ask. It is because the chemists of Narcoxia have created substances that are beyond the capacity of their fellow men. These chemical substances are too powerful for the Narcoxians. Once a Narcoxian tries a substance (and perhaps now would be a good time to mention that there are five major substances being abused on Narcoxia, videlicet, Deprevor (Blue), Stimilos (Green), Opian (Black), Hallucitrol (Red), Inhalis (White)), he or she has a very difficult time not trying it again. And the more substance any given individual uses, the more he or she must use it again. Dependency develops quickly, and soon the person you thought you knew is gone - and in his or her place, and unrecognizable monster.

Narcoxia represents this (ab)use by tapping. Effects like "If this creature is tapped" and "Target tapped creature" and "the number of tapped creatures" and "If this is the first time this creature has been tapped", etc.

So, just one card? Glosh. Um. . .

Opia Fiend Creature - Imp (C)At the beginning of your endstep, if Opia Fiend is untapped, put a -1/-1 counter on a creature at random.

"Addicted? No. Any time. I could stop, at any time."

1/1

Random effects are usually given to Red, but in Narcoxia, predictions are difficult to make. Every single colour will get its fair share or Random effects. Some players will not enjoy this, to be sure - but they will get their cold calculable cards as well. I hope that the flavour of the above Imp is self-explanatory, this being a flavour contest - but if not I will happily give a little explanation: The Imp hasn't been able to ingest Opian for some time. Since at least the untap phase. He or she begins to feel a slight madness coming on, and by the time the endstep rolls around, he or she is at the end of the proverbial rope. He or she then lashes out at someone, in the form of mugging or theft. Trying to gain coins w/which he or she will be able to attain more Opian. Of course there is one other option for the Opia Fiend. One other creature that may fall prey to the random -1/-1 counter. One last resort. . .

Zilywil sat on the low bench. She watched the roaches roam across the littered floor. Crawling across broken glass and discarded organic material, they flittered and chirped in a chaotic chorus. She lifted her feet and tucked them under her. In contrast, the bench was relatively clean. Smudged here and there with dirt, it was clearly used quite a bit. It stretched around four sides of the hexagonal room. On the side opposite Zilywil, sat the Kithkin.

Zilywil was waiting for him to awaken. He held the wet rag clenched in his unconsious fist. The small fellow was dressed in similar rags. Gray and frayed, the clothe clung to his frail frame like wet paper. She watched his chest rise and fall in short irregular bursts. His mouth hung slack, and the dry cavernous innards produced a rasping sound like a rake on sand. His gray hair hung down and appeared to tangle in the tatters of his garb. His eyes were open only slightly - their whites darker than usual. His pupils were not visible; they were rolled back. His bare feet were filthy and they hung inches from the floor. The roaches seemed uninterested.

Zi had waited long enough. She grabbed her small bag and inspected it for any signs of life. It was clear. She got up.

"What did you want to know?" The voice startled her. It sounded less like a humanoid and more like some sort of natural phenomenon. Have you ever heard a fumarole at twilight? His voice was not unsimilar to that.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were awake. . ."

"What did you want to know?" The Kithkin's repition was identical.

"I was wondering if you knew of a man. I've heard him called," she paused, hoping that she wasn't talking to someone dangerous, "the West Wind."

The pause was hard as iron. It pressed on and oppressed Zily. It lasted so long that she began to think that the Kithkin had passed back into the realm of unconsciousness. She kicked a broken bottle, idly.

"You are asking dangerous questions, young lady." Zily looked up, both smiling and frightened. "Yes, I know of him. I can tell you what I know. . . For a price."

Her trail was as complex and twisted as an old an powerful river. The Inhalis-imbued Kithkin had pointed her in the general direction of The Grove. A great marshy wood, where some of the Narcoxian went to get away from the constant pressures of city life. Zi had been excited to hear that such a place existed, but as she looked around, it really didn't appear to be all that different.

The ground and trees were littered with various creatures in various stages of crashing. It was easy to see who had just ingested Stimilos. She watched two cat men angrily fight each other. Blood spilled from the neck of the loser. The chemical caused a violent reaction in most of its users. On the other side of the grove, a Loxodon roared through the trees. He leaped the small stream that divided the circle of dirt and then dove back through the woods and out of sight. She stepped forward.

"Excuse me," her voice cracked like a dry twig, "I'm looking for Fretcher. Have any of you seen him?"

She felt like a bad comedian. The silence was bad, and she had a feeling she'd better get used to awkward silences in this world. Suddenly the frustration got the better of her.

"Excuse me!" she said. Not a yell, but much louder. She quietly made the wind rise. Leaves began to stir at her feet. "I'm looking for Fretcher."

This time several of the creatures noticed her. A satyr pointed toward a large tent on one side of the grove. "Hey miss. He might be in there. I can't say for sure, but it is a place that Fretcher frequents."

"Thank you," Zi muttered as she began to tread across the leafy ground.

The tent was intimidating. Across it many things had been scrawled. Words that gentlemen avoid. Skulls. Images of death and destruction. Stains of suspicious nature. It also seemed to be pitch black inside. Zi inhaled and stepped inside. It was not as dark as it had seemed from the outside. A large stump sat in the center. Next to it a sign read: The StuMp. She looked around the enclosure for her yeti.

He sat in the corner talking to someone. The someone was standing, and Zily watched as they exchanged items. Fretcher gave the someone several shiny coins. In return, he received a small parcel. She waited for their conversation to end. The peddler walked away, and Fretcher eagerly unwrapped his tiny gift.

"You. Are you Fretcher?"

The yeti was startled out of his trance. "Who are you?" He inquired. His brow furrowed. Not only was he suspicious of strangers asking about him, but it also meant that he'd have to wait several more moments before engaging his attention to his parcel.

"I'm just a girl looking for information."

"I don't have any," Fretcher grunted as he rubbed his nose clean. His great vacuous nostrils began to turn from pink to crimson. His white fur, began to stand up, as if from contact with static electricity. He stood.

"Please. I've come a great distance. Can I speak with you in private." She glanced around the tent at the fallen figures - some of whom were rising at the sound of Fretcher's inhalations.

"Fine. If you can keep up." Fretcher tore out of the tent and quickly scaled a tree. He lunged into the branches of the next and paused to refill his nasal cavities.

Zily ran out after him. "I'm looking for a man," she yelled up at the yeti.

"Well, you're in luck. I know a lot of those," the Yeti said as he roamed from tree to tree - ever deeper into the wood.

After she was sure that they were alone, she yelled back, "He's called the West Wind."

Fretcher fell out of the tree he was in. He looked up at her. His expression told her everything she needed to know.

The vast plain stretches on like a windless sea. Nothing grows. Clods of dirt and fist-sized stones cover an empty terrain. Deep beneath the surface creatures do stir. Life below ground does not flourish, but it subsists. They are blind and their minds do not function like yours or mine. They feed and grow and reproduce in darkness and solitude. They will never feel the warmth of the sun.

Sitting on the earth with her hands on her knees, Batsel is considering the orb that shines upon her. The creatures below her will never be in its presence, but would they be able to feel it if they were? The sun shines brightly in the sky - indeed, the sky is not blue, but a kind of pearl. Perhaps eggshell. But, Batsel's arms are cold. She decides that she has waited long enough. There will be no warmth for her. She is happy, at least, that the light is enough.

Standing up, the small green girl looks out at the horizon. She needs no map. No guide. She walks alone. Over the earth and over the life under her feet. Her skins keep certain parts of her warm, but she is parched and tired still. This sun does not give her what she needs and there is no water in this arid scape. Still, onward she treks. She has been walking for three days, and she expects to walk for several more.

The sun inches its way across the sky and it has traveled nigh half its journey when she meets the man.

Her feet stop. "Hello," she says in a voice quiet, yet nothing with a soul would have trouble hearing her.

The man, looks up from the ground. His eyes are opaque and brown with dust. "Grak!" Blood projects itself onto the earth from his oral orifice.

"Tell me, do you know of a man? One who is called the West Wind?"

The man rolls in his waste. He grunts like a stuck boar. There is a moment of silence. Then he begins to shudder. Batsel watches him. Then she realizes that he is laughing. "You're going to see the West Wind?" He cackles there on his deathbed. "Thank ye, miss. I doubt you be real, but you've given this poor sinner one last laugh."

"I am real. Tell me, why do you laugh?"

"Who d'you think did this to me, missy? Why, take a wild guess. That's right. Your West Wind hisself! Banished me to this God forsaken desert! Ay, but y'know I could've made it across, I could've!"

"Why didn't you?" Batsal blinks once. Then again.

The man writhes in pain-filled laughter. It turns to crying. His lacrimal ducts empty, the attempt at mourning something like a dry heave for his eyes. "My toes!" He screams an animal howl. "He cut off my bloody toes!" The man points at his blood caked feet. "My God Damned Toes!"

By nightfall, Batsal has traveled many miles. She sleeps soundly after sunset. She does not dream.

Have you ever heard an animal just cry and cry and cry? Well, imagine that sound goes on and on and just doesn't ever stop. And imagine that there are several of these animals. Some are large and their sound is low and some are small and their sound is high. Now, imagine that the sound is being amplified to an ear-bleeding volume. The sound that you are currently meditating upon is the sound that emanated constantly from the compound.

You could hear the place before you could see it. But if you traveled toward the sound long enough you'd be able to get a glimpse. Up a slope of low degree you'd have to trek. When you got to the top you'd find yourself at a warehouse with a gaping open gate. The structure basically has only three walls. Inside the warehouse the sound is dampened, but still constant. Surprisingly few workers appear to be in such a large building. Crates and machinery lie is disarray. Strewn among them vast amounts of paper. The floor is littered with this sheeted carnage.

If you were to continue to the back of the warehouse, you would find yourself with a decision to make. Which door would you like to go through? There are many doors with very unpleasant things behind them, but perhaps the most unpleasant door is the central one. It is locked and barred. But, were one to unlock and unbar it, one would be able to open it with one's own hands.

After shutting it behind you, you'd be able to view the corridor in front of you. It is lined with odd torches. They burn a fire that lacks all colour. Their colourless light illuminates dark stone walls that shine, and a floor covered in luxurious carpet. The intricate designs below your feet seem to slither and sway in a two-dimensional wind. If you chose to pace these corridors you would perhaps see several strange and disturbing things, but if you were pure of heart and strong of spirit then you would find your way through the labyrinth of grayly lighted tunnels you would find your way to yet another door. This door is not closed, it is ajar. However, you will find it harder to enter than any other door in the compound. From within a darkness emanates. It is the darkness of your childhood. The darkness that made you sweat in your bed on the cold nights. And from it you feel a faint breeze.

The woman wears an aprin over her sturdy frame. She cleans the house from morning until noon. You can see your reflection in it. She does not stop there though. She will impress every one of your senses. Upon opening the door in the afternoon, one will smell the most delightful of scents. The woman in the best cook between three rivers. The woman is many things, but she is not Batsal's mother.

Batsal sits in a sunlit patch of floor. The window's light shines onto the pages that her eyes pour over. Batsal can hear the woman downstairs. Clatter and banging of metal on stone. Today is like many other days, but it will not remain so.

Batsal's door slams open. "Baty, dearie. I have to go to town. Heaven knows how, but we've gone out a' both Tarragon and Thyme - and I can't make me famous fowl with't either!" The woman does not wait for reply and the house shakes as her solid arm pulls the door back into its frame. Batsal listens to the house creek as her caretaker exits it.

The little girl reads on, but the big empty house begins to whisper, and it is distracting.

She gets up. "What do you want?" Her voice is a timid whimper. She does not fear the house, but she does not speak very often and her vocal cords are weak. The house beckons her into the hall wordlessly. She walks through the corridor into the darkness of the stairwell. The attic is thick with dust, but there is a small jewelry box that has only the thinnest layer upon it. Batsal goes to the box. She opens it and a quiet song begins to sing itself. The song has no words and it sounds like a small child in front of an unfamiliar audience.

The little girl picks up the piece of paper. She unfolds it and reads it.

Finally, the woman returns home. Her basket is laden with herbs. When she walks into the kitchen, she is startled by Batsal. The little girl so rarely talks, "What is Nar-cox-ia?"

The woman grows pale: "I've no idea, Darlin'. Honest 'twas on ya, when we found you. Just a baby y'were. Barely knew how to talk! I'd tell ya if I could - I would!"

That night, Batsal opens her door silently. She leaves a note of her own on the kitchen table before she closes the front door behind her. It only has two words: "Thank you."

It was odd. Batsal was able to walk right past the guards. They didn't seem to care. She was sure they noticed her. They made eye contact, briefly. A grimace grew across one of their faces as he looked from her eyes to her feet and back again. Once she was in the enormous warehouse, it was quite the same. Nobody stopped and looked at her, or came up to her, or saw her and ran away to contact the proper authorities. Each individual she saw went lethargically about his work.

Needless to say, Batsal wasn't very concerned about her destination by now. She was just hoping she could find a place in this Compound where water would be found. She sniffed the air, and knew where she must go. At the back of the warehouse there were many doors. She sniffed again as she approached them, and then opened one with confidence. Behind the door there was no hall, just a dumbwaiter. She stepped forward into it. The door shut behind her and she began to descend.

When the dumbwaiter stopped, Batsal found herself looking into a small marble room. Against the opposite wall, a pool serenely stood. She rushed to it, and dove in. The water filled her pores as if they were buckets. Her skin returned to its normal Pistachio hue. She was just beginning to enjoy herself when she realized that there was something odd about the water. Sitting up, Batsal looked around the room. She could feel herself breathing.

The room was supported by marble pillars and etched into the pillars were figures of children. The children were not running or playing, they were sitting. There was no hint at movement. The children sat and stared straight ahead. Their eyes did not meet. The odd geometry of the room was further enhanced by its drooping ceiling. The ceiling descended downward at, perhaps, a 20 degree angle. It led to a point from which hung the single chandelier that lit the room. The chandelier was composed of a dark gray metal, and the candles that burned atop it burned brightly.

Batsal's eyes watched the candles. She could see them melting. And then, the wax began to drip. It started like rain. Into the pool with Batsal. She felt it on her skin, but it seemed to dissipate so quickly that her eyes could find no trace. All she could do was hear and feel. Her eyes angled downward and her brow furrowed in confusion.

She went to the edge of the pool and took a hand offered to her as she attempted to exit the water's refreshing grasp. After she'd stepped out, she looked at the hand, which still held hers. It belonged to a man. A man clad all in black. His cloak about hung about his shoulders, but even his garments beneath were complete pitch. She looked up at his face. A black mask covered it. The entirety of his head was covered in a leather mask. There were no holes. She felt fear creep into her with startling speed. His grip on her hand increased as if to both reassure and dominate her.

The man stepped forward and, to her surprise, so did Batsal. She walked with him into a hallway. The lights above them flickered and waned. Batsal watched the shadows along the walls as the leather-headed man led her further down the hall. She realized then that she could not find the source of the shadows. The slithered and danced like fire across the walls and floor, but the corridor was void of ornamentation. The only décor hung on the walls flatly. Plain framed decorations, but Batsal could not divine what the frames held. She attempted to slow down to get a closer look, and inside the frame she managed to peer. Her eyes opened wide as the face in the frame looked back at her. It was not on the surface of the wall, but instead deep within it. The face shouted and screamed at her, but its words were silent. Batsal suddenly began to cry. All the water she'd absorbed flowing from her lacrimal ducts like ice thawing in the Spring. The man grabbed her with both arms and held her close to him. Her ear pressed against his chest, she thought she could hear sounds from inside – but what they were she could not guess. She knew only that she was no longer crying, and when their embrace ended she was no longer in the hall.

Music flowed from a small quintet of musicians. It was elegant and ethereal. It sounded like it came from within a fog. And indeed there was fog. It flowed upon the floor like a tide. In and out, it wrapped itself around Batsal's feet with its cold fingers. The leather-headed man took a woman's hand and joined in the dancing. Batsal watched them. The woman was very beautiful and her grace was marvelous. Soon they were intermingled with dozens of other dancers. Some of them wore masks, though none frightened Batsal like the leather mask had. Their masks were of porcelain or wood. Many were metal, and a few were made of skin and fur. Despite the variety of facewear, most of the patrons were unmasked. She looked at their faces. These people, both male and female, were beautiful. Their skin and hair flawless in its perfection. Their bone structure implied noble blood. Yet on their faces were no smiles. Their mouths formed tepid lines and their eyes were opaque with apathy. Batsal found herself more frightened of the unmasked dancers than she was of the masked ones. She stepped back and fell.

The music quickly faded from her ears in the dark tunnel. The tunnel through which she fell. Murmurs replaced them, and she could feel herself shivering. The fall was lasting an exorbitant amount of time. She cast her eyes downward and saw where she would soon land. She tucked her legs to her chest and held them there in preparation. The mud felt strangely good as she sank into its depths.

The black tar soil entered her through every orifice. She could feel it fill her nostrils. She could taste it in her mouth. She could hear it like air on glass in her ears. It held her down and she could not move. The feeling was not unpleasant, and Batsal now felt the first wave of euphoria that she had experienced since her arrival on this Plane. She could feel all of herself, and her mind was once again clear. She thought back through her memories with ease. She remembered half-epiphanies and long lost Summer mornings. She remembered what it felt like to be a child. Her body grew warm as she remembered the times that she had done wrong. The people who suffered because of her inherent selfishness. She smiled for them. She knew that they would be okay, and she knew that never again would she inflict such pains on anyone. Her mouth full of mud, she let loose a muffled laugh. At the moment of its cessation, she felt her stomach glow. She looked down at her curled form, and without thinking about it, she was able to see. Her stomach was darkened to deep brown. And it was smooth and shiny. She watched it crack open. From her a leaf stretched forward. Its chartreuse veins palely traced the form. More leaves sprouted from the tip of the stem, until there were five. Then they began to curl into themselves. One become the thumb and the others were the fingers. The arm curled down and gripped Batsal's waist. She watched in awe – it did hurt, but it was the pain of pleasure and she relished it. As the fingers curled around her hip, another green hand reached up through the murk. It too, clung to her waist like a long forgotten lover. And as her face emerged from her abdomen, she stiffled her smile. The face smiled back at her, hair wet and eyes shiny with new life – her arms wrapped around Batsal, and held her while she straddled her creator. They kissed.

The leather hand gripped Batsal's tightly. She came up into air again with an expression of health upon her filthy face. Mud-covered and weak-legged, Batsal followed the leather-headed man down the next tunnel. She looked back at the muddy pond she had lain in. It appeared undisturbed.

Rats scurried up and down the tunnel. Across the walls and over Batsal's bear feet. She felt easy. The busy rats were constantly mating and fighting and feeding. She watched them live their lives in a hasty race. Their time must move much more quickly she thought as she cherished every step she took. The hall led to a large black curtain. The man released her hand and stepped through. She hesitated a moment and then stepped through as well.

The room was nearly empty. The leather-headed man was no longer visible. She stepped across a floor or stone. But the stone was covered in a thin layer of sand. The sand was rough on her feet and the sound it made was unpleasant. On the other side of the room was a chair. Plain and wood. In it sat a figure. He was tragically stooped and he shuddered. Behind him a window opened onto the wasteland she had wandered through. She looked out the window. It was sunrise. She stared and the man shook. He convulsed violently as the sun crept across the sky. His chair did not creak. Not once. The man's face was hidden in his hands which shivered more than the rest of him. At times he appeared to be almost hitting himself with open palms. Batsal's eyes followed the sun as it began to set. The last of its rays were disappearing as she stepped forward towards the man. She stepped again and again until she stood right in front of his mad figure. He let his hands shake down to his knees and his face peered up at the girl. In the twilight, Batsal found his features hard to make out, but she was unsure of whether or not the darkness had caused this. He formed his mouth into a circle and he let his lungs empty themselves on Batsal. The air from his blowing was cold on her face. She watched him disintegrate. His skin falling from him like egg shell. His muscles, bone, and sinew melting like wax, until he is nothing more than a stain in the sand.

Her blood feels potent. It is strong and it makes her strong. Batsal is aware that that was no ordinary water she absorbed. She looks for an exit. The only option appears to be the curtain. She moves through its flowing velvet darkness. On the opposite side, Batsal stands – not in an underground alley filled with rats and their products, but on a ledge. She looks down at a pit of mud. In it a figure writhes. She watches the figure. It laughs and kicks and flails its arms madly. The maniac squirms in the filth. Batsal watches herself make love to the wet earth. The muddy Batsal clings to the loose liquid ground and thrusts herself into it. Her eyes roll back and her mouth open in a screaming smile. The Batsal below rolls over and stares up at her voyeur. Her expression becomes blank and she slowly and silently sinks into her lover's liquid arms.

The leather-headed man walks up to the mud. His head turns in the direction of Batsal, and then he reaches his hand into the depths. Batsal hears the sound of fear and hatred emit itself from the black below. She turns and walks back through the curtain. Again, she is stopped on the brink of a precipice. This one is a balcony and it looks out across a floor in motion. The sweet and sad music drifts up into Batsal's mud-crusted ears. She watches the dancers swirl in beautiful flux below her. She listens as the music increases its tempo and pace. The musicians' faces turn red and begin to sweat. The dancers keep pace with them. Their footwork is incredible. She watches herself walk into the room below, led by the leather-headed man. This time the woman takes her hand, and the leather-headed man stands back to watch. Batsal watches Batsal clumsily stumble onto the floor. She cannot seem to keep the rhythm and pace that the ever quicker musicians enforce on the revelers. Batsal looks at her face and it is just as blank and apathetic as each of the other dancers.

That is when Batsal feels it. She looks at her arms. In their crooks, there are little openings, and from the openings squirm the little black worms. They squeeze through the holes in her arms, and she feels them on her legs and neck as well. They crawl out of her at an alarming rate. She brushes them off of her skin for a moment before she is sick. Her eyes, rimmed with tears as the mess exits her mouth she looks down and the leather-headed man's head points itself up at her. She writhes and rolls in her innards. Back through the curtain, she crawls.

She is on the ground. It is night. Batsal sees herself sitting in the darkness. She is in relaxation. Unconscious without sunlight and water, Batsal looks both weak and strong. The watcher stares out before she looses more of herself in the dirt. She tries to stand, but falters and falls. More of her comes out. Now in the darkness it looks black. Batsal tastes her blood as well as her bile. She lies back breathing hard. Suddenly her abdomen opens up and a great glutinous worm pushes itself from her. It embraces her and she screams. She lays there screaming through the worm's embrace. Finally, her strength worn, she lets the worm finish in silence. It crawls off to the horizon. Batsal shudders in the cold, and in her misery. She continues to shake in fear and despair. Her tears run until she is dry again. Completely.

An arm extends from the curtain. It grabs her weak scaly hand and pulls her in. She is in a room. She feels the hand in her hand and it leads her to a chair. She sits in the room. It is cold and dark. It is freezing and Batsal is filled with tragic pain. She shudders repeatedly. She convulses desperately. She watches the curtains part. She covers her eyes with her hands. Batsal sits in the chair shaking in pain and horror. She only wishes it were over. If only she would have the courage to end it. She waits for endless hours. Screaming within herself. And as the cracks between her fingers turn from gray to black she hears the footsteps. Batsal is relieved. She forms her mouth into a circle. She knows what comes next.

Threshold X - EFFECT as long as X or more cards are in your graveyard.

Now for some original thoughts. . .

I'm thinking something having to do with Mana in one's mana pool. Something like Holding - As long as there is mana in your mana pool EFFECT, but it is kinda similar to Threshold. Or Rush - Whenever mana leaves your mana pool EFFECT, but that seems a little too broad. . .

I'll bring back the Elated/Depressed concept from before.

Creatures are Elated when they are equipped and Depressed - actually that word is sorta lame" lachrymose? melancholy? woebegone? Hmmmm - creatures are enchanted.

Now, I thought of another one on my way to school:

Subtype - Side-Effect for Instants and Sorceries, e.g.

Jugular HalluthamInstant - Side EffectJugular Hallutham deals 3 damage to target creature.Side-Effect: The next creature that enters the battlefield has haste.

"The blood of an injector can be as potent as the initial injection if you have the right tools."

Hmmm. . . I'm not totally satisfied with this. I think I like it though.

One more I thought of earlier:

Overdose - Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under your control, if this card is in your hand you may attach it to that creature. If you do, sacrifice it at the beginning of your next upkeep.

So, again w/the theme of auras and equipments. Can I put this on both? I've yet to decide. . .

I should probably think of some more because some of these are likely scrap-heap material. . .

Top-Down!

Stash COST- You may exile this card from your hand and pay its Stash COST. If you do draw a card and then put the Stashed card on top of your library?

And then, but, wait! Stash target creature? Would be all like "Stash target creature (To stash a permanent, its owner draws a card and then puts that permanent on top of his or her library). Does that even work? How am I going to phrase that. Needless to say, I'm a tad excited by this. . .

More? Ugh. . .

Um.

Vision - A creature with Vision may be attacked or blocked by creatures that do not exist. . .

What the shucks?

Okay. . . Now I am thinking - Whenever a player creates a creature that does not exist, he or she loses 3 life. Whenever a player attacks or blocks with a creature that doesn't exist, he or she loses 3 life. Creatures that do not exist cannot be targeted and they deal no combat damage. If one attacks or blocks, sacrifice it at the end of combat! Creatures that do not exist may only block creatures with Vision. Players may only create one Creature that does not exist each turn.

Oh! This is one of those things that I get really excited about, and that Cam is going to tell me doesn't work! But I am so psyched right now!

I'm ending on that note. I know Vision is a drawback. This brings tears to me heart. Oh, and I might change the name. . . Distorted Perception? I dunno. I'll think about it. . .

Okay, here are a couple more:

Dependence on Creatures - When you cast this spell, if you are dependent on creatures, EFFECT. (A player is Dependent on creatures when over half of his or her permanents are those.)

Or artifacts or enchantments or lands.

And you know - switch it up, like "If target player is dependent on tokens then BLAH.

Okay, so I need an Equipment/Aura thing as well - I'm thinking Hooked on Equipment/Auras/Counters, etc.? Meaning, effects having to do with these types and things.

Hooked on Auras - When this creature enters the battlefield you may attach target Aura to it.

Hooked on Counters - When this creature enters the battlefield you may move all counters from one creature to this creature.

Threshold X - As long as you have X or more cards in your graveyard Effect.Stash - This card's owner draws a card, and then puts this card third from the top in his or her library.Lucidity - A creature with Lucidity may be blocked by creatures that do not exist.

Comprehensive Rules for Creatures that do not exist:XXX.X - A player may create a Creature that does not exist once during his turn, at any time that he or she could cast a sorcery. When this creature enters the battlefield, that player loses 3 life.XXX.Y - Creatures that do not exist cannot attack or block.XXX.Ya - Creatures that do not exist cannot be the targets of spells or abilities.XXX.Yb - If a Creature that does not exist does attack, block, or become the target of a spell or ability its controller loses 3 life.XXX.Z - Sacrifice each Creature that does not exist at the end of each turn.

Dependence on TYPE (A player is Dependent on a type when over half of his or her permanents are that type.)Hooked on Equipment/Auras/Counters - When this creature enters the battlefield you may attach target Equipment/Aura to it, or move any number of counters from target creature/land/'walker to it.

"The will to thrive is stronger than the will to survive - and if I can attain chemical ecstasy one last time before my survival runs out, then I will die happy."- Klef, Kithkin Wallow-Weaver

The Yeti's SackSorceryChoose one: Stash target Equipment; or Stash target Enchantment; or Stash target creature in a graveyard. (To stash a permanent, that permanent's owner draws a card and then puts that permanent third from the top in his or her library.)

"Whatever you desire - pliggers, suaps, or yarle tack - it can be found in the Yeti's Sack!"

Inhalis YouthCreature - Human Citizen (C)Whenever you choose one, sacrifice Inhalis Youth. If you do, creatures you control gain +1/+1 until end of turn.

"We must put a stop to this epidemic. These children are our future, and we are letting them slip away!" - Kraain, Township Gaveler

2/4SoulslopInstantChoose one - Gain 5 life, or each player gains 10 life, or target opponent gains 20 life.

"I will take my bread. We will drink our wine. You will own my soul. My sins and my glory are yours."- Subjugation Chant of the Lvirine Celibates

Seraphim VeinsEnchantment - AuraEnchant playerEach player has protection from anything that the enchanted player is Dependent upon. (A player is dependent when over half of his or her permanents are any given type, videlicet, Artifacts, Mountains, Brushwaggs.)

Inhalis-Induced ParanoiaEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureEnchanted creature is a coward and each creature that share a colour with the enchanted creature is a coward as well.Cowards can't block tapped creatures.

"Auras of green. Auras of red. Auras in general. Who wouldn't be afraid?"

2/6Easy AccessibilityEnchantment - AuraEnchant permanentEnchanted permanent has ": Stash this permanent."At the end of each turn, if you stashed a permanent, put the top two cards of your library on the bottom of your library.

"There is no profit without pain. I just try to avoid being the one in it."

2/1

Cognitive WithdrawalEnchantmentWhenever you draw a card, put the top card of your library into your graveyard.Threshold 12-36: Instants and sorceries in your graveyard have "Exile your graveyard: Return this card to your hand."

"This is the worst part, Levinus.""But, Partios! You said that three weeks ago!"

Sudden GasperationsSorceryReturn six target permanents that target player is dependent upon to his or her hand. (A player is dependent when over half of his or her permanents are any given type, videlicet, Auras, Creatures, Harpies.)

"The only way to combat that which is ruining your mind is to remove it from the physical world entirely."

Flinty MedusoidCreature - Jellyfish SpiritHooked on Loyalty.When you cast Flinty Medusoid, search each opponent's library for at least two Planeswalkers with different names and put each onto the battlefield. Shuffle those libraries.Flinty Medusoid gets +1/+1 for each loyalty counter on it.

("No Sparkslopper can resist the call of the Medusoid. She is more alluring than the most pure batch of Deprevor." - Not enough space on card.)

3/1

Magical ZenithEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureWhen Magical Zenith becomes attached to a creature search your library for as many as five Auras with different names and attach them to that creature. Then shuffle your library.

"Why - you are the most Magical Maid my eyes have ever gazed upon! Would you wand to go for a scroll sometime?"- C'tory, Wooer of Wenches

MouthslopEnchantmentWhenever an opponent casts a creature spell choose one - Discard a card and gain one life; or each player discards two cards and gains two life; or target opponent discards three cards and doubles his or her life.

Opia FiendCreature - Imp (C)At the beginning of your endstep, if Opia Fiend is untapped, put a -1/-1 counter on a creature at random.

"Addicted? No. Any time. I could stop, at any time."

3/1

Blood BurstInstantDestroy target creature.If you are dependent upon creatures, you may destroy all creatures instead. (A player is dependent when over half of his or her permanents are any given type, videlicet, Legends, Tokens, Mermen.)

"The last thing any man wishes to see is a verifiable blood mage on a full fledged Hallucitrol binge."

Rapid DependenceSorceryEach player creates six 0/1 Black Serfs.

"They're more than just servants - they're whatever I want them to be!"- Garruk to Ti-bije

Brightness of NightEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureEnchanted creature has ": Attach all auras attached to this creature to target creature."At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice the enchanted creature.

IrresistablanceSorceryStash target artifact, you may have ~ deal 3 damage to that artifacts controller. (To stash a permanent, that permanent's owner draws a card and then puts that permanent third from the top in his or her library.)

FearfireInstantFearfire deals 6 damage to target creature. If that creature is a Coward, gain control of it instead.

"Why kill me when you could use me? I will be your loyal vassal, your charming servant, your desperate clinging annoyance!"- Triblets, Coward of Cowards

The Culmination of DaysEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureEnchanted creature is everything you are dependent upon. (A player is dependent when over half of his or her permanents are any given type, videlicet, Apes, Curses, Lands.)

"I - I just don't know what I would do. . . if anything ever happened to you."- Ut-Moton, to his army of Gorillas

Swordstorm SorcerySearch your library for any number of Equipments with different names and exile them. Swordstorm deals X damage to target creature or player, where X is the number of Equipments exiled this way.

Untainted SpiritEnchantmentEach permanent you are not addicted to has ": Add to your mana pool." (A player is dependent when over half of his or her permanents are any given type, videlicet, Snow, Sliths, Squirrels.)

"It can be easy to remain cleansed upon Narcoxia, Garruk - you just have to reward yourself a little."- Be'erk, Tidewalker

Satchelscarred TrolfCreature - Wolf Troll (U): Satchelscarred Trolf fights target creature. Whenever Satchelscarred deals damage to a creature, stash it. (To stash a permanent, that permanent's owner draws a card and then puts that permanent third from the top in his or her library.)

Garruk, AddictedPlaneswalker - GarrukWhen you cast Garruk, Addicted search your library for a Planeswalker card with a converted mana cost of or less and put it onto the battlefield. Garruk, Addicted is addicted to Loyalty.+6: Remove a Loyalty counter from another target permanent.-6: Put a Loyalty counter on each other permanent.-6: Destroy target permanent with a Loyalty counter on it.{0}

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

"How can you hear without ear? How can you see without eye? How can you think without mind?"

Static Stench()InstantChoose one - Remove X +1/+1 counters from target creature; or put X +1/+1 counters on target creature. X is the number permanents that entered and/or left the battlefield this turn.

"What is that smell?""That? That is the smell of freedom. . ."

Steelspirit MobglomerateEnchantmentCreatures you control are Hooked on Auras and Equipment. (When a creature that is Hooked on Auras and Equipment enters the battlefield, you may attach target aura and/or equipment to it.)

"You never feel better than right after dropping the mage's little helper with a straight razor."- Sorcerer Chlek

Sharpened SmileEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureOther creatures you control are Hooked on Auras.Whenever you attach Sharpened Smile to a creature, each opponent loses one life, and you gain that much life.

Traumatized by TestingInstantTarget player names X cards where X is the number of cards in all hands. Then each player reveals his or her hand. For each card correctly named, that player gains one life. For each card incorrectly or not named, that player loses one life.

Lyje, Deliverer()()()Legendary Creature - Kithkin BarbarianShroudEach Aura and Equipment have ": Attach this permanent to a permanent that it could be attached to. Any player may activate this ability." and "Whenever this permanent becomes attached to another permanent destroy both permanents."

Acidic SprayInstantAcidic Spray deals 3 damage to target player. Until end of turn, creatures that player controls are Lucid. (They can be blocked by creatures that do not exist.)

"Ahhh! My eyes!"Three hours later:"Ohhh! My eyes!"

Desecrated VirginCreature - Angel BeastWhen Desecrated Virgin enters the battlefield, exile target creature, then have it re-enter the battlefield Hooked on Auras. (When a creature that is Hooked on Auras enters the battlefield, you may attach target aura to it.)

"Once one has tasted the forbidden fruit, one cannot consume anything less."

Traumatized by TotalitySorceryDuring your next turn, every phase is a combat phase.

"It has been noted that war has adverse effects on some of the recruits. However, their reassignments to artillery squadron seem to reverse these completely."- Tipro, Goblin Notifier's Twenty Sixth Notification, Excerpt From

Blurred Boundaries()()Enchantment - AuraEnchant creatureDuring combat enchanted creature does not exist.At the end of the enchanted creature's controller's second main phase, there is a second combat phase, during which each other creature ceases to exist.

Dealt to the DealerInstantTarget permanent spell gains your choice of "Hooked on Auras" or "Hooked on Equipment." (When a creature that is Hooked on Auras and/or Equipment enters the battlefield, you may attach target aura and/or equipment to it.)

"Decisions are like omelets. Hard to make."- Inclu, Two-Fingered Goblin

Inspired Visions ()()()()SorceryTarget creature becomes Lucid until end of turn, then draw a card for each Lucid creature you control. (Lucid creatures can be blocked by Creatures that do not exist).

"The mind is deeper than any rabbit's hole."- Gygron, Rabbit Breeder

OctoklockleCreature - Octopus MutantLucidity - This creature may be blocked by creatures that do not exist.Whenever a player creates a creature that does not exist, sacrifice Octoklockle and draw 3 cards.

BalbrakLegendary Creature - Beast Goblin, sacrifice Balbrak: Unattach all permanents. Then reattach them each at random.

"Balbrak's demented mind once journeyed into the prismatic realm of a combination Hallu-Deprev comazone. It never returned."

3/1

Traumatized by TelepathyInstantEach player draws five cards, reveals them, and chooses a non-land card from an opponents hand. When a chosen card is cast, cast Traumatized by Telepathy from your graveyard, without paying its mana cost.

Ultimate Addiction ()EnchantmentAt the beginning of each upkeep put a Dependence Counter on target player and choose a type or subtype. That player is now Dependent upon the chosen type or subtype. At the end of each turn, if all players are Dependent upon all types and subtypes present on the battlefield, you win the game.

Seventh SensorCreature - Cat Fish WizardLucidity - This creature may be blocked by creatures that do not exist.Creatures that do not exist are cowards.

"She has dreamed more than you have ever slept."

2/2

Flood of FertilityInstantChoose one - Tap three target lands; or untap three target lands.

"Well, this crop will either be the biggest we've ever had or the most bantam we've ever had."- Farmer Ohj, Stimilian Vineflower Grower

Steroidal Savagery()()Enchantment - AuraEnchant creatureEnchanted creature has "Hooked on Counters" and "At the beginning of your upkeep put a +1/+1 counter on another creature you control."

Chromosomal Twist()()()SorceryTarget creature becomes Lucid. Create a token that is a copy of it. (Lucid creatures can be blocked by creatures that do not exist. This effect is permanent.)

"Am I you? Are you me? Is who that? What be when?"

Wistfull WaxingsEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureAt the beginning of your upkeep, create a token that is a copy of the enchanted creature. Attach Wistfull Waxings to it and put a +1/+1 counter on it.Creatures that share a name with the enchanted creature have no abilities.

Tolerant DosageSorceryDouble the number of counters on target permanent.

"Garruk needs more!"- Garruk

Psychedelic Medlings ()Enchantment - AuraEnchant creature or landEnchanted creature is a Forest Island.Enchanted land is a 3/3 Green and Blue Boar Fish.

"You visions may hold meaning, but if they do, it is beyond me!"- Clarus, Hallucitrollian Psychodelicist

Snowblind Eye-OpenerCreature - Yeti Wizard, Gain 3 life: Put a Lucidity counter on target permanent. Permanents with Ludicity counters on them are Lucid. (Their visions continue even after Snowblind Eye-Opener has left the battlefield).

Crippling ExperienceEnchantment+1/+1 counters have no effect on a creatures power or toughness. Permanents with +1/+1 counters on them have ": Add to your mana pool where X is the number of counters on this permanent."

"I was once strong and wild, before Narcoxia tamed me. Although it is true that I have not gained nothing. A dark knowledge now fills my mind. From whence it came, I fear I know not."- Garruk

Hallucinatory RamprageSorceryTarget creature becomes Lucid until end of turn. It must be blocked if able this turn. If that opponent has no creatures capable of blocking, he or she must create a Creature that does not exist. (When a player creates a Creature that does not exist, he or she loses 3 life).

Furred FuryfloggerCreature - YetiTrampleLucidity - This creature may be blocked by creatures that do not exist.

"His anima will destroy even the most altered perceptions."

4/3

Brain in the GraveInstantChoose one - Search your library for a card and put it into your graveyard, then shuffle your library; or you may cast target spell from your graveyard.

LungskunkinationEnchantment - AuraEnchant creatureCreatures you control are Hooked on Auras. (When a creature that is Hooked on Auras and Equipment enters the battlefield, you may attach target aura and/or equipment to it.)Whenever Lungskunkination becomes attached to a creature, target opponent loses 2 life and you gain 1.

Feral Feastings EnchantmentWhenever a creature leaves the battlefield, put a +1/+1 counter on each other creature.

Traumatized by TrenchesInstantDestroy each creature. Then put each creature destroyed this way on to the battlefield under the control of its most recent controller.

"To sit and dream, and lie in the grave - I believed myself dead, and it turned my heart to ice."- Breveling, Son of Tridan

Scour the ShelvesSorcerySearch any library for anything. Whenever you find something, you may pay half of your life rounded down. If you do, create a 1/1 Colourless Insect. Shuffle any library searched this way.

Libiutic, Lost LawPlaneswalker - Libiutic+3: Until the end of your next turn, each enchanted and/or equipped permanent is Hooked by that permanent.-3: Exile target Hooked permanent.-9: Create an Emblem with "Whenever a Player puts a card into their library, you gain control of one of that player's permanents and exile another."{3}

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

DustownLandWhen Dustown enters the battlefield choose one - exile the top 3 cards of your library; or each opponent may return any number of cards from their graveyards to their hands.: Add or to your mana pool.

Saucer of the SavantArtifact - EquipmentWhenever you equip Saucer of the Savant, gain 7 life.Equip -

"Some say it holds the milk of the udders of the Gods. Others don't."

SparkcraverArtifact - PhraliteSparkcraver costs X less to cost for every loyalty counter on the battlefield.Hooked on Loyalty (When this creature enters the battlefield you may move any amount of Loyalty counters from target permanent to it).Sparkcraver's power and toughness are equal to the number of Loyalty counters on it.

"Here is the valley we have been yearning for - a place free from the trials of Narcoxian life. A place where we can start over. Let us hope that we do not stray from our pure purposes."- Gihoril, Scribe to Libiutic

SootlotLand: Add to your mana pool. If you are dependent upon a non-land type, you may add one mana of any colour to your mana pool instead.

"Here is the perfect site for our operation laddies. Let's not daudle boys, there is work to be done - not to mention play!"- Uvvur, Footstool to Krurkun

Liar's LairLand: Add to your mana pool. If a player stashed a permanent this turn, you may add one mana of any colour to your mana pool instead.

"What do you mean, officer? My allignment? Why, it is whichever one that would please you most."

Scepter of StimulationArtifact - EquipmentEquipped creature has ": This creature gains double strike, if it has double strike, it gains triple strike, if it has triple strike, it gains quadruple strike, and so on."Equip -

Scepter of DepressionArtifact - EquipmentWhenever a creature enters the battlefield, if it is Hooked on Equipment, attach Scepter of Depression to it.Equipped creature cannot deal damage., : The next creature that enters the battlefield is Hooked on Equipment.

"Believe me, you think inserting the sphinctal syringe is disgusting - you haven't seen foul until you've seen a Phralite attain."Clur, Ancient Urchin

1/1

Theft Prevention LockArtifactEquipment you control have protection from instants, sorceries, and creatures that you don't control.

"Now I know you weren't pokin' around in me goods Chlarle, I'd hate to have to remove the other one."- Two-Fisted Wilili to One-Handed Chlarle

Hallucitrolian HornArtifact - EquipmentCreatures with the same name as the Equipped creature have Flash.Whenever a creature becomes equipped with Hallucitrolian Horn, search your library for a creature with the same name as that creature and put it into your hand. Then shuffle your library.Equip -

Back AlleyLand: Add to your mana pool. Activate this ability only if you have no cards in your hand.Discard 7 cards: Search your library for a card and put it into your hand. Then shuffle your library.

"You can get anything you want in Narcoxia, if the price is right."- Jime, Peddler of Stimilos

The Lost ComplexLegendary LandThe next land that enters the battlefield is a copy of The Lost Complex.

"You may have been there once, aye - but how can you be sure that you e'er left?"- Pluug, the Ugly

Deathbed PhraliteCreature - PhraliteHooked on everything. (When a creature that is Hooked on everything enters the battlefield, attach everything you possibly can to it).

"It would be sad, if it weren't so damned amusing!"- c'Cluc, Oaf

1/1

RushpikeArtifact - EquipmentAt the end of each phase tap the equipped creature if it is untapped, untap it if it is tapped.When you equip Rushpike to a creature, end the current phase, and the next three phases.Equip - where X is the number of phases that have ended in the current turn.

Forbidden Tablature ArtifactWhenever a player draws a card, he or she may exile it.At the beginning of each player's upkeep, he or she draws X minus 3 cards, where X is the number of cards exiled by Forbidden Tablature.

Talisman of TasteArtifact - EquipmentEquipped creature is indestructible. Each player is dependent upon it. When it leaves play, each player loses 12 life.Equip - Each opponent gains life equal to half your life total.

Total DependenceArtifactYour life total is equal to the number of permanents you control. Spells and damage do not cause you to lose life.

Binge BogLand: Choose one - Add to your mana pool; or add to your mana pool; or add to your mana pool; or add to your mana pool; or add to your mana pool.Whenever you tap Binge Bog, it loses one of its options.

Back AlleyLand: Add to your mana pool. Activate this ability only if you have no cards in your hand.Discard 7 cards: Search your library for a card and put it into your hand. Then shuffle your library.

"You can get anything you want in Narcoxia, if the price is right."- Jime, Peddler of Stimilos

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

Zilywil sat on the low bench. She watched the roaches roam across the littered floor. Crawling across broken glass and discarded organic material, they flittered and chirped in a chaotic chorus. She lifted her feet and tucked them under her. In contrast, the bench was relatively clean. Smudged here and there with dirt, it was clearly used quite a bit. It stretched around four sides of the hexagonal room. On the side opposite Zilywil, sat the Kithkin.

Zilywil was waiting for him to awaken. He held the wet rag clenched in his unconsious fist. The small fellow was dressed in similar rags. Gray and frayed, the clothe clung to his frail frame like wet paper. She watched his chest rise and fall in short irregular bursts. His mouth hung slack, and the dry cavernous innards produced a rasping sound like a rake on sand. His gray hair hung down and appeared to tangle in the tatters of his garb. His eyes were open only slightly - their whites darker than usual. His pupils were not visible; they were rolled back. His bare feet were filthy and they hung inches from the floor. The roaches seemed uninterested.

Zi had waited long enough. She grabbed her small bag and inspected it for any signs of life. It was clear. She got up.

"What did you want to know?" The voice startled her. It sounded less like a humanoid and more like some sort of natural phenomenon. Have you ever heard a fumarole at twilight? His voice was not unsimilar to that.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were awake. . ."

"What did you want to know?" The Kithkin's repition was identical.

"I was wondering if you knew of a man. I've heard him called," she paused, hoping that she wasn't talking to someone dangerous, "the West Wind."

The pause was hard as iron. It pressed on and oppressed Zily. It lasted so long that she began to think that the Kithkin had passed back into the realm of unconsciousness. She kicked a broken bottle, idly.

"You are asking dangerous questions, young lady." Zily looked up, both smiling and frightened. "Yes, I know of him. I can tell you what I know. . . For a price."

Her trail was as complex and twisted as an old an powerful river. The Inhalis-imbued Kithkin had pointed her in the general direction of The Grove. A great marshy wood, where some of the Narcoxian went to get away from the constant pressures of city life. Zi had been excited to hear that such a place existed, but as she looked around, it really didn't appear to be all that different.

The ground and trees were littered with various creatures in various stages of crashing. It was easy to see who had just ingested Stimilos. She watched two cat men angrily fight each other. Blood spilled from the neck of the loser. The chemical caused a violent reaction in most of its users. On the other side of the grove, a Loxodon roared through the trees. He leaped the small stream that divided the circle of dirt and then dove back through the woods and out of sight. She stepped forward.

"Excuse me," her voice cracked like a dry twig, "I'm looking for Fretcher. Have any of you seen him?"

She felt like a bad comedian. The silence was bad, and she had a feeling she'd better get used to awkward silences in this world. Suddenly the frustration got the better of her.

"Excuse me!" she said. Not a yell, but much louder. She quietly made the wind rise. Leaves began to stir at her feet. "I'm looking for Fretcher."

This time several of the creatures noticed her. A satyr pointed toward a large tent on one side of the grove. "Hey miss. He might be in there. I can't say for sure, but it is a place that Fretcher frequents."

"Thank you," Zi muttered as she began to tread across the leafy ground.

The tent was intimidating. Across it many things had been scrawled. Words that gentlemen avoid. Skulls. Images of death and destruction. Stains of suspicious nature. It also seemed to be pitch black inside. Zi inhaled and stepped inside. It was not as dark as it had seemed from the outside. A large stump sat in the center. Next to it a sign read: The StuMp. She looked around the enclosure for her yeti.

He sat in the corner talking to someone. The someone was standing, and Zily watched as they exchanged items. Fretcher gave the someone several shiny coins. In return, he received a small parcel. She waited for their conversation to end. The peddler walked away, and Fretcher eagerly unwrapped his tiny gift.

"You. Are you Fretcher?"

The yeti was startled out of his trance. "Who are you?" He inquired. His brow furrowed. Not only was he suspicious of strangers asking about him, but it also meant that he'd have to wait several more moments before engaging his attention to his parcel.

"I'm just a girl looking for information."

"I don't have any," Fretcher grunted as he rubbed his nose clean. His great vacuous nostrils began to turn from pink to crimson. His white fur, began to stand up, as if from contact with static electricity. He stood.

"Please. I've come a great distance. Can I speak with you in private." She glanced around the tent at the fallen figures - some of whom were rising at the sound of Fretcher's inhalations.

"Fine. If you can keep up." Fretcher tore out of the tent and quickly scaled a tree. He lunged into the branches of the next and paused to refill his nasal cavities.

Zily ran out after him. "I'm looking for a man," she yelled up at the yeti.

"Well, you're in luck. I know a lot of those," the Yeti said as he roamed from tree to tree - ever deeper into the wood.

After she was sure that they were alone, she yelled back, "He's called the West Wind."

Fretcher fell out of the tree he was in. He looked up at her. His expression told her everything she needed to know.

Grove YetiCreature - Yeti RogueAt the end of each turn, if Grove Yeti didn't attack that turn, put a -1/-1 counter on it.

"It isn't the Stim that gets you in the end. It's the absence of it."

7/7

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

That could be cool. I'm into vampires that need blood of addicts. Not an original idea I don't think. I believe they have them in the Vampire RPG, but I only played it like twice. I still think it is a cool idea. Maybe: : Target Green creature gets -1/-1 until EoT. or something.

I can see some kind of tutor mechanic maybe. Addict searching his or her library for one hidden stash.

I could really see a mechanic that turns other creatures into addicts. Hmm. "Gateway?" No, I want to do that thing were it is like VERB target creature. [Pause to Internet]. God. Kinda depressing subject matter. No, I can't find a word that could be defined as "to become addicted." Huh. Seems weird.

In my reading, the word "abuse" came up several times. "Abuse target TYPE" might be fun. It also might be offensive - because abuse is something not only tied to inanimate objects - interestingly enough, you can be abused by being tied to inanimate objects! Anyway, I think things like "Abuse target elf" or "Abuse a creature of your choice" are simply out of the question. I fear that this thread will be shut down anyway, without me even making Abuse into a keyword.

Hmmm. So I am still no closer. Anyway, some things to think about I guess.

Would High/Low be too inappropriate?

How about Elated/Depressed? I think Elated is okay. Depressed might need a change.

Videlicet:

Bipolar CyclopsCreature - Cyclops BarbarianAs long as BC is equipped he is elated. As long as he is enchanted he is depressed.Elated: BC gets +2/+2 and must attack each turn if able.Depressed: BC gets -2/-2 and can block any number of creatures.

3/3

Blah. If I wrote it all out, it'd probably be too long for my tastes.

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

"Ragged Kithkin" sounds more like a mono-black card but seems pretty nice, and there are fewer combos than with Norin The Wary.. "Grove Yeti" comes with a very small drawback for a three-mana 7/7 creature, Ruhan wasn't really weak as four-mana creature..

I don't really know how I would make drawback matters.Hellbent sounds like a reasonable train of thought.And putting -1/-1 counters on your creatures for whatever benefit. Could indicate drugs, if you'd like.

You could replace "you may" with "you must" or remove "you may" and keyword that, because that would represent addictions + restrains.. If you choose to activate this creature's optional ability or another optional ability, you're forced to activate this creature's activated ability on your next turn, but it's possible to cure that creature on the turn after that.. I removed the clause where it cares if the creature is untapped, because this version is already complex enough.. Edit: My wording doesn't seem to work, "choosing" to produce a -1/-1 counter should count as choice!

Opia Fiend - Creature - ImpFlyingAt the end of your turn, you may put a -1/-1 counter on a random creature.Addicted - As long as you made a choice on your last turn, replace "you may" with "you must" on this card.1/1

As far as I can tell, it's also possible to replace "target" with "a random" on every card in the game, because cards that you can't "underload" like Aggravate would still work properly.. You could also use that as mechanic on some cards where it would make a lot sense and when there's not much of a difference between the power level of the regular version and the power level of the random version.. Just don't randomize ~everything~ on the card so that it's not overly swingy when it's randomized! "When you cast this spell, you may copy it. If you do, change all targets of the copy at random."

Opia Fiend - Creature - ImpAt the end of your turn, you may put a -1/-1 counter on target creature.Befuddled - As long as it's untapped, replace "target" with "a random" on this card.1/1

Addicted is so cool. Actually Chaos made a similar suggestion that I was going to steal from her. I might change it to targetted or something. My choice thing is only one cards that use the word "choose," videlicet, choose one or choose two.

There is going to be a huge focus on modal spells. I kinda want to take this in a different direction though. I could go the enchanted and equipped route. Or, you know, this would be a better version of the Rakdos thing. As long as this has a +1/+1 counter on it, may is must. I need to consider my options.

What if it is: Addicted - As long as it is your opponent's turn, replace may w/must.

To me, that implies that you can only fix1 your creatures on your turn. So, Opia Fiend notwithstanding, card example would be:

Dawnless FirelighterCreature - Minotaur Wizard: Dawnless Firelighter deals 1 damage to target creature or player. You may discard a card.Addicted - As long as it is your opponent's turn, replace each instance of "may" with "must" on this card.

2/2

Or something. I like befuddled even more actually, but I think there is more space in Addicted.

Mown, good idea - I was having trouble thinking of mechanics to resurrect for this. Hellbent is good suggestion. No cards in hand. Hmmm. I could play with that. Limiting resources. "As long as you control no land", maybe?

Hefty Urchin Creature - Yeti BeastHomeless(just kidding, I'll think of a better name) - As long as you control no land, Hefty Urchin gets +4/+4 and trample?

1/1

So, I guess he doesn't like being homeless.

On another note. One thing I'd like to address is the message I'm trying to send here. I'm not particularly anti-narcotic. I had a problem once, and I got over it. I have friends who didn't, but it isn't the fault of companies for making these things. It isn't the fault of the media for romanticizing them. It isn't the fault of the supplier, for selling them. You can't blame anyone for your addiction but yourself. Is basically my premise. The F&S people told me that it seemed as though I was blaming science in my stories. That is the opposite of what I'd like to do.

So, stories notwithstanding, how do I go about making a mechanic that drives at this concept of responsibility? As I write this the name that pops into my head is Denial. Anonymous also sounds cool. Let me ponder. . .

Denial: If this creature would be effected by a nontargetting effect, SOMETHING INSTEAD?

E.g.

Masked MistressCreature - Human CitizenDenial: If Masked Mistress would be effected by a nontargetting effect, exile her instead.

"She's been locked away in that house for decades. The smoke is the only sign that she's still alive."

2/2

Basically, different creatures react different ways when confronted with their problem. Some hide, some run away, some get mad, and others laugh. I think there is some space here. I might pursue this.

The "personal responsibility" meme might be even more problematic than the "science is bad" meme. -_-

That said, even if I don't agree with the sentiment, the fact that your set HAS a thesis like that is very cool. Kudos to you for having the guts to do that, especially since it means creating a gameplay experience that's probably going to be really unpleasant. This is a real auteur set, the kind of things Wizards could never produce, ever.

What if rather than just trying to express your addiction/responsibility idea on the individual cards you could find a way to put the player zimself through that kind of experience? It seems like you're playing with that idea a little already and I think it would be interesting to play with.

The difficulty I guess would be that "results at a personal cost" is a very black thing typically... And, you know, the fact that you'd be deliberately making your players miserable.

I find it sort of confusing that there's a major "choices matter" in your set. While it makes sense from a flavorful standpoint "You put yourself in this mess" kind of way, it conflicts with the gameplay. Giving yourself a lot of choice seems to be the opposite of what should happen, which is removing choice. (Which I know you've dealt with to a certain degree.)

I can't really give any good advice though. I can't think of any theme that can work with this, and still be fun. Although with Homeless, I don't know if fun is anything you care about. I'll have you know that Homeless is a pretty bad mechanic though.

Must admit, I rather like the idea of Hellbent as a way of removing choice, by reducing the number of cards you can play. But taking control away from the player might also make the game boring. We don't want a set full of "must/can't attack/block" all over the place.

I'll get back to you if I can solve the "partially voluntary may" problem.

Kevin, Narcoxia doesn't portray drugs as cool. It is more about addiction than anything else. I do think substances can be used recreationally in a healthy fashion - but this set isn't about that. It's about abuse. Please don't get my thread locked.

Keeper, (in response to your first sentiment) really? Uh oh. Unpleasant gameplay, eh? Like following the twelve steps or something? Oooh, that'd be a cool cycle. I don't know how well it would go over. I don't actually know them or what they're called. I didn't do them. I am familiar with 13th stepping. Though, I'm not so desperate as to try it. Not yet, anyway. And for the record, I do ____ occasionally - I just don't put _____ up my ___, anymore.

Your last comment intrigues me. How to make the cost personal for other colours? I mean, Red has no problem using all of its resources - I would only have to flavour it appropriately. Green can do it sometimes too. White and Blue would be the hardest, I think. I'll see what I can do.

I'm not sure how my game-play would make players miserable. What do you mean? I obviously have no problem with doing that. If I could make my players have actual withdrawal symptoms, I would.

Oh, Withdrawal.

Withdraw target creature. That's not what I was looking for earlier - but it could be something. A withdrawn creature is considered "in withdrawal."

Hmmmm. It could be a drawback on a couple of cards, but mostly you'd have cards with effects like this:

"Withdraw target creature"": Target creature is considered in withdrawal until eot.""Destroy all creatures in withdrawal."

Or something. Now I just have to figure out what it does. People go through these things in different ways. Some become violent, others reclusive - sort of like the denial spectrum.

Okay, opposite of detain, kinda:

Withdraw: Untap target creature. It cannot become tapped for any reason. If it would become tapped, destroy it instead. The next time that creature is the target of a spell or ability it becomes no longer in withdrawal.

Or maybe take out the second sentence. Something like that. Thoughts?

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

Eh, stuff. I don't really like transform though, but it's a nice way to do permanent change in a card's ability, rather than having if/else clauses with counters and jumbo. Even if counters can represent substance. You could even have one for each type of effect, so you can have other stuff that distributes it. Words~

With the making your players miserable comment I was referring to how kind of... hm, how to describe this? It seems like a lot of the effects you're gravitating toward involve unpleasant costs, actions players tend to dislike, slow control elements... stuff like that. Stuff that could potentially be powerful in the right deck, but requires a certain amount of sadism or masochism to play. Which, again, isn't a bad thing I don't think... but I assumed you were deliberately gravitating towards mechanics that you knew were unpleasant to deal with for that reason.

You should probably expand "choosing" to include optional parts of activated triggered abilities, because charm-like options quickly create too many complicated combinations when they're on too many cards.. I don't like the changed version of the "addicted" keyword because it's your fault and it's because of your actions when creatures are addicted and when they're fixed.. And don't use a keyword that encourages players to sacrifice every land, it's nice for a few cards but shouldn't be a very large subtheme that deserves its very own keyword.. I'm not sure which things can "affect" creatures and which things can't, so I can't write something!

No, but how can you guys not? I just wish I was as good at finishing them. Probably would be better if I didn't start so many. Really, it's only three. Chaos would scoff.

Keeper, yeah - maybe subconsciously. I'm pretty sure anyone who plays Magic is a little bit masochistic. Perhaps it just fits into my general distaste for mankind. No, I don't know. I just like things that make me uncomfortable - like Lynch can do it sometimes. You should recommend me some artists that are good, but also evocative in that sort of way. Like Nursery was my favorite poem in Bringing the Shovel Down. But, I don't like that sort of thing for its own sake. I don't know if you're familiar with the films of Alejandro Jodorowsky, but I feel like he does that occasionally. TheHoly Mountain being one example - while things like El Topo and Santa Sangre are still evocative, but in a much more meaningful way. Of course, if you aren't familiar than just ignore me. You should check out Santa Sangre though. It's pretty good.

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.

You should probably expand "choosing" to include optional parts of activated triggered abilities, because charm-like options quickly create too many complicated combinations when they're on too many cards.. I don't like the changed version of the "addicted" keyword because it's your fault and it's because of your actions when creatures are addicted and when they're fixed.. And don't use a keyword that encourages players to sacrifice every land, it's nice for a few cards but shouldn't be a very large subtheme that deserves its very own keyword.. I'm not sure which things can "affect" creatures and which things can't, so I can't write something!

I will address this on Sunday. Thank you for your continual feedback. It is invaluable. You really raise some good points, but I am sleepy and I have 0 minutes tomorrow for response - but I'll be thinking about it.

139359831 wrote:

That is a lovely painting of Richard Garfield. It really brings out his feminine side.