Big To Be Small

May 14, 2013

It requires a determined centering to be gentle sometimes
on those occasions when it's hard to be gentle, yet when being gentle
is what's called for - as can be vouched for by any
parent
of mischievous toddlers who, in all their innocent loveliness, can
drive you crazy. It can be tough to be flexible when being
flexible is called for. It's the willingness to give and
take which is essentially the art of dealmaking, and being
flexible is a risk. In this spirit, it takes bigness to be small
when being small is called for. It takes guts to get
off it. Essentially it's the willingness to get off it which forms
the bedrock of enduring relationships and a good quality
life.

You have to be big to be small.
You have to be big enough to be willing to bend with the
wind (so to speak), even though we're thrown by
our pre‑programmed macho assumptions about Life, to
resist
bending. Here, "macho" is asexual. Seeing it as a
virtue to not bend, to not get off it, to always be
strong and maintain a stiff upper lip is neither feminine
nor masculine. It's simply human. No, it's not
transformed.
But it is human.

We want to be right so much. Don't tell me your reasons
why
you want to be right. It's not based on any reason. It may
look like you want to be right because of that reason or
because of this reason - religious dictates, morality, plain arrogant
righteousness, whatever. But wanting to be right isn't based on
any reason. You want to be right because the
machine
you are is a
being-right-machine
which wants to be right. Look: that's ...
it's ... job! It's that simple. Telling me
why
you want to be right buys you nothing. It's no excuse. It's just the
machine
making excuses.

We want to win so much. We
resist
being dominated so much. No, don't tell me
why
you want to win, to succeed. And don't tell me
why
you
resist
being dominated. You want to win at any cost, you
resist
being dominated because the
machine
you are wants to win at any cost, because the
machine
you are
resists
being dominated. And telling me
why
you want to win at any cost, telling
why
you
resist
being dominated, buys you nothing. They're no excuse. It's just the
machine
you are, making excuses. You want to win at any cost because the
machine
you are is a
win‑at‑any‑cost‑machine.
You
resist
being dominated because the
machine
you are is a
resist‑being‑dominated‑machine.
You can't not be a
win‑at‑any‑cost‑machine.
You can't not be a
resist‑being‑dominated‑machine.

Now, listen:
imagine
the possibility of any warring factions (pick your favorite adversaries
- Hamas vs Israel, Sunni vs Shia, North Korea vs South Korea, Al Qaeda
vs USA, Syria vs its own citizens, Taliban vs anyone and
everyone -
God
knows there's no shortage to choose from in today's world) finally
figuring out having to be right and
resisting
being wrong at any cost is simply machinery, finally figuring
out having to win and
resisting
losing at any cost is simply machinery, finally figuring out having to
dominate and
resisting
being dominated at any cost is simply machinery.

We
machines
can choose to empower ie we can choose to lend credence
to our push to being right, or not. We can choose to empower,
to lend credence to our drive to win at all costs, or not. We can
choose to empower, to lend credence to our insistence on dominating, or
not. This isn't a philosophical view. Neither is it
touting another tired old belief system to justify and /
or explain something, or to
fix
or make something better. Rather, it's an
observation
of how we're constructed - which is plain to see if you're willing to
look closely enough and truthfully enough unflinchingly.

Here's the thing: we're
machines
(that's brutal to confront) who can make choices and
invent new possibilities (that's profound). And the most profound
choice we
machines
can make is choosing things the way they are and the way they aren't.
And the most profound possibility we
machines
can invent is the possibility of a world that
works
for everyone with no one and nothing left out. To do that you have to
get off it. You have to be big to be small. It's a choice. It's
a possibility.

Being small isn't being powerless. Being small isn't being
helpless. You have to be powerful to get off it. You have to be
powerful to
serve.
You have to be big to be generous. You have to be big to be
wrong. You have to be big to forgive. You have to be big to walk
away from winning at any cost. You have to be big to confront it's
how the
machinery's
programmed. You have to be big to have compassion for it. You're
anything but helpless when you to realize the bigness of
being small is the possibility of sustained
peaceful
co-existence for all of us, for everyone and everything, right here on
our
Planet Earth.