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Monday, June 13, 2011

Sleep Well, I Love You

Discipline, first; bedtime, second. That's the prevailing order of parents' concerns, year after year. The top two concerns marry each other when a relentless child calls from her bed, "Mommy, I want a drink!" or "Daddy come back. I need you!" What's an exhausted parent to do?

A loving bedtime ritual takes your child from the safety of your presence in the daytime to the safety of your non-presence in the dark. But television is not your ally in the transition. Television, or any form of screen time, delays bedtime. It stimulates rather than calms a child, and isolates her at the very time you need to draw close.

Your child needs you. Begin bedtime with a quiet activity together. End it quietly, as well. Save something - prayers, or a whispered good night to the stuffed animals in her room - for after your child is in bed. Then leave with a reassuring "Good night. Sweet dreams. I love you."

If your child calls out or cries for you:

Go to your child, but do not take her out of bed.

Tell her, "It is time to go to sleep. You can do it. Good night."

Go back again and again, if necessary. A child left to cry hysterically in the dark will hardly let go of you the next night.

Be reassuring.

Be brief.

Be consistent.

Be together if you are a two-parent family.

Hold the line with a loving, firm voice. On this your child has no choice.

Sleep well! I love you.

A Colorful Thought: Rituals are the comforting colors of love a child can count on to be repeated, day after day.

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About Me

Hi there! I'm Marjorie, a National Christa McAuliffe Fellow in Education, an early childhood teacher, parent educator, and author for 39 rewarding years. I am so passionate about joyful parenting in the early years that I founded and directed a nonprofit organization for parent education. I love being a mother of four and grandmother of 14, each child delightfully different. My absolute joy of teaching children and their parents for almost four decades spills over in this blog. Welcome!