Archive for the Sara Jean Underwood Category

I appreciate when Sara Jean Underwood does….sure I PREFER LOOKING AT HER NAKED PUSSY ….I’m a purist and figure that’s where she belongs and that is what she’s meant to be doing…this attempt at mainstream, although a logical move for more money and longivity, especially when targetting virgin losers makes sense, they are loyal, I get it….but bitch was better off getting naked for attention……

Here she is in a photoshoot that my sources say is from 2012, despite looking like some low budget trash from the 90s, you know like the opening pics to a porn photogallery, where she ends up fisting herself til she squirts, the kind of photoshoot only someone serious about her career as a mainstream TV personality would do…..because modeling bikinis for 20,000 dollars or less just makes sense….

I’m all for girls being in bikinis and getting their money’s worth out of her fake tits, but this Sara Jean is sending me mixed messages yo….

It is safe to say that this is the hottest photoshoot Men’s Fitness has ever been involved in….sure I LIKE LOOKING AT HER NAKED PUSSY IN PICTURE AND VIDEO a lot better than this….you know since she’s already been there and done that….luckily at the beginning of her career unlike most Playboy pussy…and that archived her at her prime while giving her a step up in the world…a lesson all young girls need to embrace and follow her lead on…cuz we like you naked at 18 better than naked at 30…..and even though she’s not naked…it’s nice to see her exploiting herself, you capitalizing on her body, to get ahead….it’s nice to watch.

Sara Jean Underwood was at some Vegas pool party that I assume she hosted because she’s got an amazing body and needs to be in a bikini in order to stay relevent….I mean I think she needs to stay naked and take the natural course of being an ex playboy playmate and gradually make her way into hardcore porn….because I LIKE LOOKING AT HER NAKED PUSSY IN PICTURE AND VIDEO …

I am not too into her mainstream hustle…doing the nerd comic book tech gadget videogame thing for some shitty TV network no one cares about….that shit only works when I haven’t seen a bitch naked….once I have…and she’s no longer getting naked in efforts to have a mainstream career, it’s like she’s mocking me or giving me the finger but not the kind of finger than makes me cum via my prostate…if you know what I mean.

Sara Jean Underwood took part in Esquire’s Me in My Place feature, an obvious move see cuz she’s a Playboy bitch trying to break down the mainstream doing anything she can to get noticed, using every opportunity she can to exploit herself to a virgin loser crowd….from being on G4TV…..where she gets in comic costumes…or by wearing comic book underwear in hot shoots like this to just put the nerds over the edge…making them cum themselves…even though google will let them see her totally naked….because that is how she got here…..

I guess nerds are weird and that comic book reference is what makes the shit hot to them…while I’m more into her NAKED PUSSY …..

Either way, I’m friends with the dude from Me in Your Place…He has a great thing going, an has LAUNCHED AN APP that you can use special promo code “esquire” to get you 20% off the app.

It is hard to care when a bitch like Sara Jean Underwood posts a picture of her tits with her head cropped out of it, like she’s nervous you’re gonna put her on blast, in some kind of smear campaign that ruins her chances of being the president, even if the shit is non-nude….on twitter…

People are so vapid and useless that their ideas of the perfect girl are so fucking emotionally disconnected….shit like “she’d be a good mom and homemaker”….or “she’s rich”….or “her family is nice to me”….or “she lets me watch sports or knows sports”….or “she kicks it with the guys and has a beer”….or “I can trust her”…or “we like the same things”….or “we have great conversations”….or “we broke down all odds to be together cuz we were love at first sight”….or “she makes me laugh….all superficial and not the core of what matters in a real fucking connection with another person…

…and the core of what matters is “she has great small fake tits, a hot pussy, she sucks my dick on command, she treats my dick like a sport and most importantly she let’s me fuck other girls when she’s on her period”….simple….

I can assume these pics of Sara Jean are part of the tips Ryan Seacrest gave her to be the perfect girl to dudes, both G4TV or not….cuz he’s got a lot of experience in knowing what guys want…you know she he fucks them…

Sara Jean Underwood was a tight bodied Playmate of the year who didn’t need fake tits…but who got fake tits…to give her natural tits some shape and attitude pretty much making them perfect tits…even though anyone with 5k and insecurity and a willingness to get cut open for the sake of vanity can have …. so it’s not all that impressive…but what is is that she didn’t go trashy and get DD cup beach balls that were the reason I always hated fake tits….

See, before Decemeber…I had only experienced massive implants and hated them….but Santa came early for me this past year and showed me what a B-Cup implant was all about…perfection….leading me to realize that implants save shity tits….they can be magical…if if they are full of shit….

The other thing good about Sara Jean besides her smart implant choices, hard body, ability to pretend to be Ryan Seacrests GF before becoming the new Olivia Munn manipulating the nerds everywhere…while providing them with masturbation FODDER from her past stint with Playboy that got her famous in the first place…cuz if you’re 19 with a dream…that’s an easy way to make it happen if you’re willing to get naked sluts…….. is her pussy ….The thing is fucking spectacular…possibly hardly used…and that just makes her irritating behavior so acceptable…

Implants save shitty tits….you know I was never an implant fan, because all the implants I ever fucked or jerked off on were just too big, but I was recently made a believer, that a solid B Cup implant is pretty much fucking perfection….There’s still enough natural to it to not be two little tennis ball titties….so ripping into this playboy playmate turned nerd masturbation fodder by pretending to like their bullshit….for having fake tits Ryan Seacrest didn’t get enough use out of is not gonna happen….especially since she’s got a hot pussy to match…I guess that makes me a fan of a bitch I shouldn’t really be a fan of cuz I get her lie…and I like to protect nerds everywhere from bitches who will eat them up and spit them out….but who fucking cares…here she is playing ping pong on the beach.

This is a lie…but one of those lies that doesn’t matter because the bitch is relatively hot and in a bikini…but a lie none the less and that’s totally not very Christian of SARAH JEAN UNDERWOOD ….you see she’s pulling the next Olivia Munn…pretending to be this fan boy accessible virgin loser fantasy chick who’s just the all round perfect girl for the average guy…it sports and beer and video games and sci/fi….and I find it how two dimensional her marketing people think us dudes are…..feeding us a fucking lie….even if it is a lie that doesn’t matter…even if it is a better lie than when she sold her soul to be Ryan Seacrest’s diversion from his homosexuality via being his “gf” in exchange for him helping her go from Playboy to TV…..even if it is a better lie than her fake tits that were fine before….It’s still a fucking lie…a bikini clad lie I want to burry my face in…..because under this bikini is a slamming hot pussy…..we’ve all seen naked….

Here’s some Ryan Seacrest pussy from Playboy turned marketing herself as a host on NERD TV cuz NERDS are loyal and they stay fans until they die, or more likely, until they turn themselves into robots that last forever thanks to all the advancements in technology….Sarah Underwood and she’s wrestling in a vat of Oatmeal…reminding me of the love I had for girls wrestling in Mud, Jello, Pudding and pretty much anything and everything that involved being wet, half naked, usually drunk while I was drunk, until going to a bar and actually witnessing one – realizing the bitches who agree to this kind of thing in real life…are bitches you’d rather not see ….so here she is living up the fantasy she’s created around herself….for nerds to feel like they will one day marry her…it’s weird…but this clip isn’t…it’s hot and I saw that cuz I’ve seen her naked and now what her vagina looks like bald…Good times.

Here’s Sarah Jean Underwood is a marketing scam, targeted at nerds and virgins, knowing she has a partially seedy nude past…coupled with her Ryan Seacrest training, gives her the perfect level of slut who knows what pathetic people want…and you know what…when a marketing scam involves a bitch getting half naked for attention or to get noticed…even if she’s already been naked and can be seen naked…I’m still into it…even if I know just how bullshit it…cuz I like half naked bitches…especially when I can cross reference their VAGAINA PICS

Everyone’s loving this nerd seductress with fake tits so hard right now….I’m not sure if it is cuz the interent is filled with nerds and nerds don’t mind that she’s manipulating them by using their weakness, by exploiting their lifestyle and interests as if she actually cares and is into their shit, even though she’s not….cuz not that many girls are into that shit, especially not one who has done playboy and has suck a great ass, making her like a hooker they hire, once they can’t take masturbating anymore, to come over and force them to talk about robots and videogames until they cum…..or if they think she’s actually legit….but who cares…cuz she’s got a great ass and google allows us to find nude pics of her…so she’s a winner to me….now watch her hot photoshoot vide…

Sarah Jean Underwood is all hype right now…at least on the internet…because she does nerd shit half naked…and has an archive of nude pics the nerds who use the internet can gross reference for masturbation even though I see nothing but a scamming bottom feeding whore who got naked to get ahead, dated Seacrest to get ahead, got a gig on G4TV to get a head and now gets half naked to get ahead…it is some clever shit that makes her serious money and is more fun than stripping….you know less abusive a lie on herself that is easier to live with than really officially whoring out for 10 dollars a song…and I guess more girls with few talents but a great body should follow her lead……and I’ll follow her VAGINA ….but I’ll settle for tongue…

Everyone loves Sara Jean Underwood…at least virgin losers do and as far as I’m concerned that’s everyone…you know since this is the internet and that’s the kind of person who frequents the internet….you know cuz actual cool people who can get laid…are busy getting laid….

She’s some playboy trash, who is actually pretty hot, turned TV host thanks to a stint as Ryan Seacrest’s front thathe’s not gay, a TV host that happens to be the body that rock’s superhero outfits on shows for virgin loser, making her fuckin’ set for life…cuz virgin losers are loyal and that’s a good thing for her…but not so good for us…cuz if we all ignored her attempt at a legit career, she’d woulda ended up in porn, in one of those coulda gone either way, and went the wrong way for us and the right way for her situations….True story.

I don’t see why nerds get excited seeing a stripper bitch posing in costumes of comic book characters they are addicted to…I mean maybe she humanizes their fantasies of a bitch they must know doesn’t actually exist, but this is the closest they’ll get to it, until making their nerd millions inventing something, on to be able to find dumb bitches who never noticed them before to wear whatever they are told cuz they are into the perks of marrying a millionaire nerd….

Especially when a quick google search gets me pics of her naked like this:

See cuz I’m more about the pussy than the nerd costume…cuz I like having sex with women and not with comic books…I’m weird like that….