Those of you who don’t live in California have your own crosses to bear, I’m sure, but you can be thankful for one thing: You’ve been spared the months-long onslaught of advertising promoting Meg Whitman for governor. Just so you don’t feel left out, here’s an ever-so-slightly tweaked version of what we Californians have been putting up with:

When the opening line of your first Senate campaign ad is: I’m not a witch!
And then ends with a paean to hobbyist wiretapper Linda Tripp: I’m you.

That’s funny, because there is video tape of you saying you dabbled in witchcraft. Not to mention your crusade against masturbation. And the spending campaign money on things like gas, food, rent and bowling.