A brief rundown of conservative and evangelical arguments defending an alleged pedophile

Over the past year, we’ve had a lot of opportunity to study why exactly someone would defend the indefensible. I would list some examples, but I’m just going to say “Trump presidency,” point out the fact that he still has supporters, and leave it at that.

(On a side note, if you’re one of those people that takes the Bible literally, there is technically no evidence that Joseph and Mary ever had relations. Jesus isn’t Joseph’s biological son. There’s never a mention of Jesus’s siblings in the Bible. And Mary’s nickname is the Virgin Mary. Sure, you can assume they got it on. But it doesn’t technically say it. So.)

This is gross on a bunch of levels, and it’s been analyzed a million times already, so let’s move on.

2.) The Washington Post is full of lies.

30+ sources don’t matter. His reputation for dating high school students even back then doesn’t matter.

JFK was gross AF and also 19 is legitimately an adult. And also JFK is not running for Senate in 2017. And also, if we’re playing this game, come get your boy Warren G. Harding. But also let’s not play this game because it’s terrifying and hellish and nobody wins.