I
am a stay at home mom and I
have talked to other stay at
home moms and we all feel that
society is devaluing mothers
who choose to stay home. Do
you feel this is because of
the feminist movements saying
that women need to work outside
of the home to be fulfilled?
Is it okay to "work" in the
home and raise our children
and still feel valued as a women
who have opinions? Why is it
that so many people see this
as a lazy job? Is feminist to
blame? Please respond. I am
desperately searching for answers.

Thank
You,

Cheryl
Smith

Dear
Cheryl,

If
you look at any gain that has
been made in parenting -- from
family leave to possible wages
for homemaking to valuing "parenting"
or "mothering" as a profession
-- it is entirely due to feminists.
I think that there remains some
confusion about what is the
ideal situation, because we
don't yet value that each person's
individual choices are just
that and not a rejection of
ours. As is, stay at homes feel
judged by working mothers and
vice versa. Most of this is
entirely based on the other
person's perceptions, not the
reality of the situation. Feminists
get blamed for this, when it's
really the individual women
who are doing the judging. I
think that the workplace needs
to change to accommodate the
demands we all have at home
and this is what feminists are
trying to do, as well as trying
to get wages or at least attributed
wages for those mothers or fathers
who stay at home full time.