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Do You Have Joint Custody With A Jerk?

I have read a lot of stepfamily and custody books over the years, trying to find some bit of help for a situation filled with conflict and hate. I came across a book that not only had useful information in it, but made me laugh out loud many times. It stayed on my nightstand for quite a while as a reminder and for a laugh.

>> Monday, March 26, 2018

>> Tuesday, April 21, 2015

It's been awhile since I've posted regularly. I've reduced the amount of blogging that I've done for years and stopped paying for the domain name for this site so I'm just a regular blogspot blog now.

We are gearing up for the end of the school year. Our oldest is graduating from high school and looking forward to 7-8 years of college, starting in a few months. Our second oldest has his first girlfriend, first job, and driver's permit (all before age 16...scary). Our third oldest is almost done with the joys of middle school and will start high school. Our youngest, still in elementary, went through a bad time with a virus - lost a lot of weight because couldn't keep much of anything down for a week but she is better now. We are trying to get her agreement to homeschool (yes, we can say 'you ARE going to homeschool' but we want her full cooperation and we have time before the next school year starts to get it). This commom core/PARCC testing crap is such a waste of instruction time (that's been a fight with the school the last few months). I am NOT a fan of common core.

Stepkids - yeah, still haven't seen them since the last time I posted. I have heard they will be here for their sister's high school graduation next month. Shocker! The ex is actually going to "allow" them to drive down here by themselves (yeah, if you remember, SD is above drinking age and SS graduated a couple years ago) but the ex still rules their roost. Whatever. That's up to them to deal with...not my problem.

>> Monday, February 2, 2015

I don't care how old my kids get. If they behave disrespectfully or nasty, I'm going to call them on it whether they are nine or 19 (or four or 40!).

You would not believe (or maybe you would) the nasty language used on my stepdaughter's Facebook page by my 19yo stepson and one of his friends. It was disgusting and it wasn't filtered so anybody on her FB could see his language - grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings, his mother, etc. When I commented on the post that younger siblings could see the post on her FB, the response was "you guys are weird". I couldn't tell if she was directing that at somebody else in the thread or me. If it was directed at me? I'm weird for not wanting kids to be subject to the most disgusting language (it just wasn't a cuss word...it was nasty smut about what each boy could do with very explicit, white trash language). We ended up taking off our youngest child from her sister's FB so she wouldn't see it. The ex's dad ended up calling my SS out on it on FB - told him to show more respect for his grandmother. The ex? Nah, why should she parent? Why start now? She not only responded passively to it on FB, she allowed it to stay up. You'd think embarrassment alone for how the rest of the family views that behavior and her reaction would be enough for her to do something. Nope. Guess she's done pretending to be something she isn't?

Maybe my expectations are too high. If you raise your kids without rules or consequences, and they act like white trash, I guess they're just behaving in the same way they've always been allowed to when they've been with her.

Nope. I expect MY kids to be respectful. If I raise them to act like white trash, then shame on me.

>> Thursday, November 13, 2014

What if you suspected your grown stepson was fathered by another man?

I've said all along that I didn't think my SS was my husband's for many reasons (the ex didn't tell him she was pregnant until she was more than three months along though they lived together, she "offered" to allow him not to claim paternity (as he did with their daughter) but didn't tell him why (he assumed she just wanted to keep father/son apart since they broke up), the ex's long time boss does things for them like send them to Disney a few times, buys them computers and large, flat screen televisions, pays her personal cell phone, etc.), and mom was very active through this kid's entire childhood in alienating father and son. He also doesn't look anything like his dad but that could've been just the way the genes fell.

I've recently come across a picture of this very generous and involved boss. OH.MY.GOD.

If true, coming forward that she had cheated would have destroyed her fake BS image with the in-laws, would have made her years' long battle to destroy dad hypocritical, and her strict Catholic upbringing - her dad would birth a cow. He had already disowned her when she became pregnant the first time w/o marriage. A second pregnancy by cheating? That would've been HUGE.

>> Wednesday, October 22, 2014

I found this video of these young girls (group called The Warning) pulling off a Metallica cover song. It was really cool to watch. I told my husband he needs to teach our three girls to do this. They have the musical talent and the voice. He can pull out the electric guitars, amps, set up our full drum kit, get an egnater tweeater and anything else they need and go to town. Instant internet sensation. The girls in the video are ages 9 to 14. Here it is:

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Who am I?

I am mom to four children and stepmom to two through 18 years of marriage so far (and counting), who has angrily watched the manipulation of children thru the years that should bring shame to any adult doing so. What is done by one parent to hurt the other parent hurts the children most. This blog is my emotional venting place through blended family chaos. If you don't like honest emotions in a longstanding, difficult situation, you might not like my blog. I'd go find a blog where they have pretty unicorns flying over rainbows if I were you then.

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DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN...

Because sometimes you just need to VENT!

I have a series of posts and comments from people in step situations, concerning things they hate about it, whether it be about the ex, the law, whatever. If you'd like to add to it, feel free to comment below one of the posts or email me and I will make a new post when I have several new ones to add. You can remain anonymous in the new post or not. It's up to you!