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1 April 2010

You, me and the kitchen sink

This kitchen is both sad and a place that brings back beautiful memories. This is Cadi's kitchen in Virginia USA. Cadi, I send you much love during your sadness. It sounds like you and Brent shared many happy hours in your kitchen. I hope you continue to find peace there.

Cadi writes:
"This is "my kitchen sink."

We rent a small, old bungalow-style house in Richmond, Virginia in the U.S.A where I'm a teacher. Just a bit over a month ago my love, Brent, passed away suddenly. I have many memories of us cooking dinner together in this lil' kitchen, of being silly, drinking wine while cooking, him teasing me about my lumpy mashed potatoes, me teasing him about being a messy cook...

For a long time I didn't step into the kitchen. Friends brought us food. And I seriously took dirty dishes to a friends house to wash them in her dishwasher. Crazy, huh? I just couldn't motivate myself to do much at all. Then one Saturday morning I realized just how nice it was to stand at the sink & wash the dishes, just how Brent and I used to. And it brought beautiful memories and a sense of peace.

We have a plain & simple kinda life. The second picture shows our dining area, just off the kitchen. Green is my favorite color. We usually have fresh flowers - even if it's just something tiny. The dresser holds linen & art supplies my children (two boys, 11 & 13) use. The toys in the basket are from their early childhood & are now mostly used when guests with wee lil' ones visit us.

Oh Cadi. I am sincerely sorry to hear of your loss - for both yourself and your children. I am glad that you will be able to derive comforting and happy memories from your pretty kitchen and home. I will be looking at your Blog and thinking of you across the miles.Tracy (Brisbane, Australia)

oh goodness, I just found this so sad to read. I follow your blog, but hadn't read it for a couple of months - too busy, how horrible and a rotten excuse.I had no idea.I am so so so sorry.I'm glad you're able to have happy memories.xx

I'm glad you find some comfort now in doing the mundane things. Grief is a journey most of us have walked, but it is unique for everyone since we are individuals. The days ahead will be challenging, but I hope you find hope and peace with your children. Will be sending thoughts and prayers your way! Stickhorse Cowgirl V

Blessings to you & your family Cadi at this very sad time. You are brave to share this with us and we are enriched by your sharing. I love your neat & simple kitchen & dining room & find it inspiring. Bask in your beautiful memories in your kitchen.Sending peaceful wishes to you from West Australia,Jeni

It takes time to grieve. I am sorry to hear you have so recently experienced this yourself, and I am hoping that you will more and more feel comfortable in your kitchen, and that your memories will heal and not hurt. It was generous of you to share this,Cadi, truly. I have art supplies near my table too.

My heart goes out to you. I was able to imagine all that you shared of your beautiful memories. Thank you for sharing such a personal part of your life with us. I'm not far from you...I live in east Tennessee. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you for sharing your kitchen and your story, Cadi. I read your blog for a bit...my prayers are with you. What a roller coster ride you are on right now....best of luck with the house hunting, and i hope that the rest of your pregnacy goes smoothly.

It is the memories that make a home and all the good things that happened in it. Each time you do the dishes you remember your loved one and the fun you had together. Cherish every memory.Green in my favourite colour too

Dear Cadi, I love the sense of order and calm that radiates from your kitchen. There is so much love and nuture bound up in the act of preparing and eating food that it can only be healing for you in the long term.As someone who not so long ago has stood where you are standing now, I know that anything or any place that gives you a sense of peace and allows you to bathe in the warmth of happy memories is a bonus on this difficult journey you are now travelling.I hope your lovely kitchen continues to give you that peace.Judith

Dearest Cadi,Thanks so much for sharing your kitchen, and your beautiful memories.I can't say it will get easier(missing your mate), but it will get different, in time.Hoping for healing for you and your boys.

I am so sorry for your loss and for your dear children , as well as your unborn child, I hope your pregnancy will continue to be a good one and that the birth goes well . Your kitchen is truly lovely and I am so glad you have returned to using it and all the best in your new home. I will be following your blog to see how you are making out . Peace be with you .Sheila

Hi, Cadi~ I'm in RVA, too. I'm sorry you're going through such sorrow. I'm sending prayers up to Heaven for you and your boys. How odd that you're so close geographically, and I'm reaching out to you via a blog in Australia! God bless and keep you.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am sending good thoughts your way during your time of grieving. Your kitchen looks so simple and peaceful. I live in Virginia Beach, Virginia and have family in and near Richmond.

Cadi, hugs to you. It's so hard to lose the special loved ones in our lives. My heart goes out to you for your great loss.

I absolutely love the style of your kitchen and home. I'm trying to live more simply in my own life. I find it to be a long process, but will get there and it makes me happier to have less stuff. Your pictures are inspiring, and so are you.

Every time you step into your kitchen, remember your Brent is right there beside you. For I truly believe that although the body may cease, the spirit lives on. God bless you.

Your kitchen reminds me of the houses I lived in while I was at VCU. I miss those houses but love having a big kitchen again because I always made a mess trying to do things on 3-4 feet of counter space.

WELCOME TO DOWN TO EARTH

If you haven't already discovered the power of your own home you are in for a delightful and beautiful shock. Come closer and let me whisper in your ear, because if everyone knows this, it will cause a revolution. The work you do in your own home, by creating a warm and secure place for yourself and your family to live in, will enrich you and make you a different person. It saved me from a life of ridiculous spending and mindless acquisition and slowed me down enough to allow me to see the beauty here. When I took the time to change my attitude towards my home, it not only gave me the energy to do housework and the strength to make the physical changes so our home better suited how we live, it changed me in the process. It is a beautiful change that I am grateful for every day.