Finally a doctor in the “House,” but not for long

After two, yes two, months
away, House is finally back tonight. But, before
you get all “Yay, Olivia Wilde, yay!” on me, let me break
the bad news to you. The medical drama has only three new pre-strike
episodes left. And they will blow them all within the next week. House’s
new diagnostic team had better be fast learners.

Now, I’m not sure why
Fox would hoard the last remaining new episodes until the new year, only
to blow through them as quickly as possible. And don’t lie about the
hoarding, Fox. Call me Sherlock, but something tells me tonight’s episode
wasn’t supposed to air at the end of January.

Then Sunday, following the
Super Bowl, comes a very special House episode, featuring very
special guest star/very special patient of the week Mira Sorvino.
The Oscar winner will play a doctor stationed at the South Pole who
gets treated by House & Co. via webcam. This is one of those moments
you have to really believe in your ISP.

Then the last fresh House will
air Feb. 5, and will involve the not-so good doctor treating a newly
converted Hasidic Jewish woman. Man, you just know some decidedly un-PC
House-isms are going to be flying in that episode.

While all the remaining new
cases sound interesting, I’m most intrigued by the ongoing mystery
of Olivia’s enigmatic and as-of-yet still nameless doctor Thirteen.
And is anyone else piqued by the fact that the she is wearing what appear
to be old-school suspenders and a ribbed tank top in her official cast
photo? Suspenders and a tank top? Are you trying to tell us something,
Fox? Is this Thirteen’s secret? Because if that’s the case, I’ll
take back every nasty thing I’ve ever said about Rupert Murdoch.