Germ Magnets

Germ Magnets

Oh shoot me now! Sausage is tucked up in the spare bed after having thrown up all over his teddies, himself, his bed, everywhere. Horace is upstairs wiping everything with anti-bacterial wipes and making piles of sick soaked sheets and pyjamas. It’s horrid. Sausage also threw up earlier on this afternoon. I think we have a sick bug on our hands. I don’t like sick bugs at the best of times, normally I just make sure there’s some sort of plastic sick tub in most of the rooms and grin and bear it, but this time I’m nervous. My tummy already aches from colitis pains and this would just put the ‘tin hat on it’ as they say around here. So, I have tasked Horace with clearing it up as he’s at home and I normally have to do it anyway. I made up the spare bed, so I’ve done my bit. I don’t want to catch this! I might just have to go bath in Dettol now.

Poor little love, he’s white as a sheet with a temperature too. I think this might be a long night. Now I have to think about how I’m going to walk Darlek to school even if her brother is weak, poorly and liable to projectile vomit at some point on the 45 minute walk to and from school, twice a day. I might just keep both of them off school, I don’t want to have to put Sausage through that just for the sake of attendance records, and if school don’t like that, then they can lump it. I’ll give her work to do at home for the day. By that point, she’ll no doubt be joining in with the vomiting. I always say we should do more together as a family, although I meant like…trips to the zoo, not Norovirus.

I wish kids didn’t catch everything! They really are germ magnets. It doesn’t help that at age four they still aren’t averse to licking random things like shop counters whilst I’m waiting to pay for something – or picking fluffy food up off the carpet and eating it before I’ve had chance to stop them. They make it worse for themselves! Mind you, some say that kids need to be exposed to these germs because it boosts their immune system – that’s why we’re told not to use too many anti-bacterial products in the house. All I can say is that my two will be immune to Rampaging Virulent Space Viruses by the time they finish their education.

In the days before kids I used to get about two bad colds a year, and that was it. Now we get sick bugs, trips to the loo bugs, coughs, colds, feeling like poo bugs. (If you read that fast it could almost be an ode to a ‘Hypochondriac’)

Sorry, I’m just sick of sick bugs. I have no time for this! If Horace gets this he can wimp out of work and throwing up in waste paper baskets and just come home and sleep it off. If I get this I’ll have to chuck up in the road and carry on with the school run regardless. I suppose I could be tidy and take a plastic bag with me if the worst comes to the worst. Oh joy!

I took your advice! Both kids are wide awake now at 3am, both have bellyache and I’m poised with a towel to catch puke, Calpol to ease the discomfort, hot water bottles, drinks of water and I’m sleeping on their floor in case there’s any more hurling – which I suspect there will be. Least that’s the school run sorted, neither are going in tomorrow. No way!