NASA's limited budget means they can only attempt to recreate a black hole by colliding obese women into each other at very slow speeds.

-OR-

Hallelujah Bejebus! Down with Portion Control!Relief spreads across fat Edna's face like melted suet on a piping hot glazed ham after she hears that obesity may not shorten life span... for a lucky few.

Oh stop your screamin Mildred, that's the fourth time you drank so much you blew out your knee, besides Tom Jones is coming on any minute and i want you to help me get my underwear off so i can throw it to him

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