This is a blog of news and essays aimed toward gay Mormons who wish to hold the Priesthood of God honorably (Men) or to remain active members of the LDS Church (Men or Women), their family and friends, or anyone who has questions about what it is to be a faithful Mormon, or a Mormon questioning... and gay.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Really. Nampa, Idaho to be exact. He was a dairy farmer and had a big 'ol farm house with several large barns and sheds situated on many rolling acres. And cows. These were not the pretty cows that said “moo” on command and sat organized and neat on my toy shelf next to my hot wheels. Nor were these cows nearly as conscientious as I had pitched them to be while I played with plastic animals in my bedroom. And, where there are large unruly cows, I discovered as a small boy, there was stuff left by cows.

Lots of stuff.

There was also stuff that had to be fed to cows, and stuff taken from the cow even when they did’t want their stuff taken, and once taken, the milk had to be chilled and separated and then there was more dirty stuff to be cleaned. The dairy farm was not anywhere near as spotless and fresh as on the TV advertisements and the happy bovines of Nampa, Idaho were not nearly as cheery or clever as those currently promoting chicken sandwiches or chocolate milk.

Grandpa had the right idea (or maybe it was grandmas idea) in leaving his work boots and coveralls in the mud room just inside the screen door. The world stayed outside where it could keep just as it was and was always meant to be once the Garden of Eden had been cleared of humans. Inside the house was a different world where stocking feet, slippers or clean shoes were welcome and appropriate.

Sometimes after the boots came off, Grandpa would clean up, and lace up a shiny pair of Florsheim dress shoes. Then, Grandpa as President Hurren made for his office at the stake building to attend to a different kind of business, and a different kind of cleanup. Something a little more spiritual.

Having a clean heart and clean hands always meant something else for me once I had spent a week on Grandpas farm feeding cows and leaving my shoes on the porch. There was work to do, and it meant getting dirty. Having a pure heart and clean hands sometimes didn't have anything to do with the muck on your boots or the dried mud glued to your pants, where a little grime left on the bar of soap may have simply meant that the job was well done. The dirt that stuck to you at Grandpas dairy farm cleaned up relatively easy, and Grandpa often said that if you didn't have to clean up you probably hadn’t done much of importance that day.

There is much emphasis put into cleanliness as a metaphor of morality and chastity. “Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall stand in his holy place?” (Ps. 24:3). He who hath clean hands and a pure heart. Who has access to the power of the lord? The virtuous and spotless. Keep in mind that through the atonement, we all may repent and become clean, pure, virtuous and spotless.

Sometimes getting our hands dirty has a connotation of being less desirable, or a little more working class than we would care to admit. We would like to, and are required to be “virtuous and spotless” as we stand before the Lord when on his hill. The getting there, the forgiving and repenting and helping of the others we better be bringing along with us - that may be a place and time for muck boots and coveralls.

The physical acts of caring for, serving, working with, and cleaning up after our brothers and sisters gets a little messy. “Jumping in and getting the job done” and/or “getting into the mix” transitions artfully into “purity and a virtuous heart”. The power we can access in the priesthood is not only limited by our degree of individual righteousness or purity, but by our general willingness to “get-er-done”. The priesthood of God brilliantly combines both “Clean and pure” and “get your hands dirty”.

The metaphors are officially, forever mixed.

It’s the “do something for someone” attribute in conjunction with having a clean and pure Christ centered heart, the "spiritual farmer tan" – that I admire with holders of the priesthood, and that my Grandpa in Nampa Idaho would be proud of.

The Priesthood of God is one of the reasons I have set aside anything that would get in the way of having a willing heart and being worthy of healing hands.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

This is another part of my famous record stash I have been keeping in the hope that someday they will be worth more than the space they are stored in. If any of you have access to Volume one, please let me know as I am antsy to have the set.

Tuesdays Album cover (and maybe Wednesdays cover - depending on wither or not I have paid my Internet bill) is happily sponsored by Miss Clairol and by "The Young Ambassadors".

As always, dear reader, remember to take your Prozac. After all, if you haven't your health or a sequined pantsuit, what have you?

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

An increasing number of Latter-day Saint families are welcoming their homosexual children who are living in committed relationships into the family circle rather than disowning or becoming estranged from them. This sentence is a welcome relief for some and proof of the ending of the world as we know it for others. Which are you?

Friends can be fickle, families however try to be forever – especially Mormon ones. Accepting those whose belief systems are different than ours into our family organization is a big step and has been for centuries.

It is not our place nor has it ever been to forgive what we feel is one offence from Frank and to deny our forgiveness for Bob for something different. We are to forgive all. We are to accept all people.

There are several issues here the biggest for LDS families seems to be; how do I incorporate family members living a lifestyle different from what I want for my family as a whole (Possible translation: wrong) without exposing my children to ways of the world I would like to keep them from? How do I build or maintain a spiritual home that includes those who are acting in a way that seems in direct conflict with my standards?

The responsibility of acceptance is often put on the church as an organization. It is not the place of the church to accept or not accept those with different standards. It is the responsibility of those people in the church to serve, strengthen and protect members of their family regardless of individual members orientation, morals, propensity for repentance or status as smoking or non.

The Church does not reach out to individual members of our family or by the same token deny admittance into these family organizations. We do. We as people, brothers and sisters mothers and fathers either reach out to family members or we do not. We either believe that all men, if given the opportunity, have the potential to bless those around them – even those who live differently, or we do not believe.

A recent commentary on the LDS churches stance toward those with SGA stated that they would like to see the Church include and make welcome into our worship services and church community those of different orientation. It is a positive assertion, and one I agree with. It is an assertion that begs a different question however.

What are they talking about? Who is the church is it is not us? If we as fathers and mothers wish to accept these family members into our circles, who or what is there to stop us? Are there in our circles members of the family that have different outlooks on life and follow their volition? By accepting them as brothers and sisters, are we required to stamp them with our seal of approval for all of their choices? That has only been the case for those who are equating their family structure with a sorority club house or a football team.

A Reasonable Facsimile

This is not a gay blog!

OK, yes it is. But it is also a Mormon blog and a blog for priesthood men who honor their priesthood and wish to keep the LDS church an active part of their lives. I am all three... four. Five?

I am an active MarMoHo, a married Mormon homosexual. I have a temple recommend that I received honestly. I supportthe LDS church and the words of a living prophet. I support people who are gay. It can be done.

Apology for the ad below

Please forgive me if there is an ad in the space below is inappropriate. I am trying to figure out how to block the ads I don't wish to display. They pay for the ice in my Diet Coke

Cal Thompson

Followers

Gay Mormon men who cherish the priesthood and would like to honor their commitments!

Please be aware of sites on the blog-o-sphere that claim to be sympathetic to the teachings of the prophets. Some very well may be. Others are simple journal entries annotating the experiences of an individual with various degrees of success and or promiscuity. Not all can be as wonderful as mine. I hate to sound like the church lady, but chose your blogs and your friends wisely.

And eat your vegetables.

And Fruits!

About Me

I write under the name of Calvin Thompson. I am a creative, accountable, and loving man. I am a Mormon who is also gay. I am married and have 3 children. My bishop is in-the-know, and so is my wife and several of my close family members. I consider myself to be a closet conservative, which is not as strange or as un-popular as you might think, and will be increasingly popular as a growing number of the left improves it's proverbial and literal aim.
I believe that LDS people are Democrats in action - as in they try to take care of people, but Republicans in name - they want to do it themselves without regulation.
I believe that the messier the fridge, the happier the family, but I still have a hard time not straightening it because I'm a control freak. My wife knows I blog, and that I am writing a book – I try to keep things as above board as I can without setting myself up for public ridicule.

"Chastity is sexual purity. Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. Chasitity means not having any sexual relations before marriage. It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage."

I order to better understand one another, I think it would be wise to understand the terms used in these essays. What I propose is an Examination for Discovery, which is briefly a meeting of the opposing sides in a lawsuit where the plaintiff and defendant, with their attorneys, meet to examine each others claims and see whether they can find some area of agreement and thus save the time of the court later on. This is assuming that there is common ground, and I believe that even the most cynical of us would agree that there is.

It will be hard to understand one another if you think blue is periwinkle and I think blue is turquoise. I know that the differences may not be a big deal - between periwinkle and turquoise - but I think its best to be incredibly clear. We both may disagree on what blue is, but, for purposes of communication, we will use the terms as listed here - adding when needed.

Of coarse they may be subject to change and/or refinement with experience and further knowledge – and with feedback. Being that this is a blog and not a diatribe, I get to lead I suppose.

List of Common Terms On Which We May Agreeor Agree To Agree On For Sake of Discussion*

For sensitivity reasons we wanted to run this list past my Gramma Ruby, which would have been really helpful not to mention miraculous because she died at an Elizabeth Dole Rally in Boise)

Active: 1) A lifestyle characterized by frequent or various social, intellectual, and particularly physical activities; 2) In geology, a volcano which erupts regularly; 3) A member of the LDS Church who is often seen carrying brownies, scriptures or children back and forth to Church.

Affirmation: 1) A positive assertion. 2) An organization for LDS homosexuals and the people that love them, but not affiliated or supported by the LDS Church.

Sentence: Falling off of the stage was the affirmation she needed to confirm the universality of gravity.

Sentence: The LDS SGA think OGA from ID, WO and MT dress like the NFL.

Beehive: 1) Home to bees, 2) A height-positive sixties hair style which many Mormon women continued to wear through the seventies and into late nineties and early 00’s with a slight revamp; 3) Young woman’s organization of girls who can’t drive yet.

Choice: 1) A decision between two or more option, and often referred to as free agency, personal rights and freedom.

Sentence: The choice for Juan Carlo was to either be eaten alive by the anaconda or jump from the boat into the mouth of the hungry crocodile.

Church: 1) An identifiable religious body under a common name; 2) a physical structure often equipped with a satellite dish, food warming area and an indoor basketball court.

Sentence: The ambulance and two squad cars were sent to the ball game at the Church between the elders and the priests due to last year’s “incident.”

Closet: 1) Upright storage space for clothing; 2) Slang reference to the status of an individual wishing to remain private about his/her sex life and who hasn’t acknowledged their SGA feelings yet to friends and family members.

Sentence: He had been in the closet so long he smelled like cedar and old shoes.

Coming Out: 1) The act of leaving a building or structure. 2) The process of telling people about one’s homosexuality is often referred to as coming out.

Conversion therapy, or reparative therapy or reorientation therapy: 1) A type of sexual orientation change effort that attempts to change the sexual orientation of a person from homosexual or bisexual to heterosexual. In the past techniques have included psychoanalytic group therapy involving aversive conditioning, electric shock or nausea-inducing drugs, and may have included sex therapy. Today there seems to be a more subtle and genteel approach which is being met with more success,

Down Low or DL : 1)This term means different things to different people, however generally it connotes dishonesty and hiding. 2) A term for men who discreetly have sex with other men while in marital relationships with women. Often these men do not consider themselves homosexual or bisexual, and their female partners are generally not aware of these infidelities.

Ex-Gay: Term for those who have experienced SGAttraction and who, for religious or other reasons, have chosen not to embrace a gay identity, or to engage in SGA behavior.

Family Group Sheets: 1) Forms used in annotating genealogy; 2) Money saving tactics for Mormon families at bedtime.

Sentence: Laverne and Lavelle grab your sister and a family group sheet and get you off to bed.

Families are Forever: 1) LDS catch phrase originating in the early eighties - referring to the belief that temple sealed families created on earth can move into the next life together. 2) The prevalent attitude after two weeks of dealing with the new in-laws.

Sentence: Did you hear our new sister-in-law-sing the Duran-Duran Medley? Are families really forever?

Folk Doctrine: 1) Doctrines that develop from prevailing rumor.

Sentence: Three stakes in Pocatello have been asked to spear-head a pilot program for the Churches new Work and Glory aerobics program.

Gay: 1) A happy and joyful method of celebrating holidays often sung about in English Carols and Fred Astaire films. 2) A common term for an individual attracted to their same gender. Gay has been a widely used synonym of "male homosexual." Its meaning is rapidly evolving to refer to both male and female homosexuals. Some people differentiate between homosexual and gay: homosexual is regarded as a sexual orientation; gay is a political identity -- i.e. an advocate for equal rights for persons of all sexual orientations

Gender: 1) The set of characteristics that distinguish between female and male members of a species. It is often used interchangeably with the word "sex" denoting the condition of being male or female.

Genealogy: 1) An activity Mormons do happily while praying to hook up with a distant relative who has done all the work.

Sentence: Brother The-Hun was a bit disturbed when his grandma showed him his genealogy line went directly to some guy named Attila.

Heterosexual: 1) People whose emotional, sexual and romantic feelings are primarily for those of the opposite sex or having to do with opposite sex attraction.

Homophobia: 1) An irrational fear, prejudice or discrimination towards homosexuals. Homophobia can take many forms, from name-calling and teasing to serious crimes like assault and murder. Homophobia like other irrational fears is most often based on ignorance.

Homosexual: 1) People whose emotional, sexual and romantic feelings are primarily for those of the same sex or having to do with same sex attraction.

In: See out.

Last days: 1) A horrific time of floods, famines, political strife and food storage eating – much like yesterday.

Sentence: The last days of a back to school sale appear to be frequented by women on a weekend pass from the state hospital.

Lesbian: Term to describe sexual and romantic desire between females.

Lifestyle: The term lifestyle (as in gay lifestyle) has become a polarizing term though used by gay and lesbian people in the past. “Those in the lifestyle” usually means “those who identify as gay", though it may refer to behavior as well as identity - much as LDS lifestyle would mean those living the teachings or of the culture, or East Coast Lifestyle may refer to black turtle necks, bookstores and apartment living.

Many are called, but few are chosen: 1) What I keep telling myself when I am asked to be on the ward activities committee again.

Mixed Marriage: For our purposes here, a union between one of “heterosexual” orientation with one dealing with SGA.

Out: See in.

Prophet: 1) A man called of God who holds the keys to direct the Church and to speak for Jesus Christ. The President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is a chosen prophet, seer and revelator.

SSA: 1) Acronym for Same Sex Attraction. The LDS Church prefers SGA, (which I always thought stood for Star Gate Atlantis reruns) but actually means Same Gender Attraction. SSA and SGA are terms not highly favored among the gay community. Neither, for that matter, is the phrase “gay community”.

Sentence: ST-TNG and SGA are playing all week on SI-FI.

Sin: To behave in a manner that is contrary to the revealed commandments of God.

Transgendered: A designation of person whose identity does not conform to conventional notions of male or female gender roles.

Quotes, Quotation Marks: Tool used to set apart a word or phrase. For our purposes here, generally speaking, using quotation marks to denote words such as “gay” or “homosexual” is offensive. If you are not comfortable with using a term from the “so-called other side”, then it is recommended that a substitute which doesn't involve quote marks is found.

Sentence: I am offended that “he” just used quotations on the phrase other side.

Straight: 1) A direction which veers neither to the left or the right. 2) A slang term used in the place of heterosexual.

Sentence: The geography club, Straights of Magellan is not accepting new members.

Strait is the gate and narrow is the way: 1) Popular scripture quote used to encourage righteous living and weight loss.

Tithing: 1) One tenth of one’s income donated voluntarily to the LDS Church for upkeep and needed things.

Sentence: Ten percent of nothing is still nothing.

Urim and Thummim: 1) Tool used by Joseph Smith to translate the Book of Mormon. 2) What I wish I had to understand my kids text messages.

Wickedness Never Was Happiness: 1) What Cal’s first missionary companion in the MTC from Macon Georga wrote on his left bicep with a sharpie when visas to Central America didn’t come through on time. 2) Comment made by those on their way to Church when a boat or motor-home pulls up in the next lane of traffic.

Preference,not Principal

Blue shirts, red ties, dark nylon socks...

This is a blog for Mormon SSA* men who wish to follow the teachings of the LDS church while owning their Homosexuality. It can be done! This blog-spot is written by a sort-of smart gay man who is a card-carrying member of the LDS church and hopes to remain so. He will remain so by following the teachings of the prophets. His motto for today is "Many a true word spoken in jest," and he will try to not be so charming.

Mr. Thompson thinks he knows just about everything. Lately, it has been proposed that he may, in actuality, not. He is trying to be open to that thought.

Mother Teresa

Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush, anxious for greater developments and greater riches and so on, so that children have very little time for their parents. Parents have very little time for each other, and in the home begins the disruption of peace of the world