Sunday, October 11, 2009

I woke up at 4am with an epic migraine. It's a horrible way to be awoken. It's so confusing. I felt like I'd been shot in the brain. I stumbled to the bathroom and took the only thing that works on my migraines. Dilaudid. Morphine. I managed to get back to sleep but woke up every half hour groaning in pain. Joe slept through it all. I got up and called my parents to tell them that I wouldn't be able to make it to Grandma's for Thanksgiving dinner. Sad face here. I was throwing up by that point though so it was for the best. When Joe finally woke up and I filled him in, he said the dreaded words. "Maybe it's a pregnancy symptom." It broke my heart. I just muttered that he shouldn't get his hopes up and pulled my sleep mask on so he couldn't see my tears...He doesn't deserve this. I'm the broken one.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

I think I've finally come back down to earth. It's still hard to put the experience into words though.The 2 Seattle shows were great. Good set lists and good seats. I did a lot of shopping and ate a lot of good food. It wasn't a relaxing trip but I don't know what I was expecting of 3 shows in 5 days.We had amazing travel luck. We drove onto the ferry both ways and had really smooth border crossings, no more than a 15 minute wait each time.

I need to explain the way PJ's fan club ticketing works. When you join the Ten Club you're given a fan club number. Tickets are then allocated by number and seniority except for rows 1, 2, 9 and 10 which are randomly assigned. A ticket lottery. You don't know where you are sitting until the day of the show when you pick up your tickets. It stops scalping tickets so I'm cool with it. Anyways, we have a fan club number that's about average. We usually end up sitting in the first few rows beside the stage. So in the wings, the closest section to the stage. This is where we were in Seattle. In Vancouver though...wow. We walk up and I show my ID and they hand me my little envelope. I moved off to the side and peeked at them. This is what I see:Yes, that says FLR, Row 2. I'll be honest, I freaked the fuck out. I gasp and immediately and hissed at Joe, "We won the lottery!" He thought I was joking. I showed him and we just stared at the tickets stunned. Then we went to FatBurger and talked about how amazing our trip had been. The phrase, "Everything is coming up Sandree (Joe's nickname for me)," was uttered a lot that evening. It was a blast. And I have pics to prove it!

Ben Harper opened.

This is one of my favourite pictures. Eddie saw me taking his picture and about a half second after I snapped this, he flashy me a goofy, toothy grin. I think he would have said cheese had he not been singing!

Here's my artsy shot. It makes a great desktop wallpaper. Ask me how I know :)

Another holy crap Eddie is looking at me pic:

Jeff and Mike:

Look how close I was to Eddie!

Full band:

And finally, a compilation of the video I took. The sound is a bit muddy in the beginning but it gets better as it goes along.

It was one of the most amazing nights of my life. I would love a repeat!

I've ovulated 4 times since March. That's insane for me. Prior to this year, I have only O'd 4 times in the last 3 years. With the help of an RE! Once he gave up on me, everything started to fall into place. The only down side is that this month I used the last of my Clomid prescription. Hopefully I won't need it again, right?

About Me

30 years old.
Married for 9 years.
PCOS caused infertility.
One pregnancy lost due to fetal bradycardia.
Closing in on the 4 year trying to conceive mark.
Totally out of options and hope.
I'm having a hard time accepting that this is the end.