We’re Giving Too Much Power to Scales and Calorie Counters

Over the years there’s a been a big shift in fitness going on. And I’m afraid this shift is causing more harm than good.

What is it?

We’re slowly relying more and more on external tools to validate what we’re eating and how we’re exercising.

At first thought this might seem like a good thing. Tools like calorie counting apps, the scale, and step trackers add a new dimension to your fitness program and can be very motivating.

But there’s also the flip side to relinquishing control to these tools.

Internal vs External Validation

How old are you?

Now, what does society say about your age and how you’re supposed to feel?

Is that the way you feel?

The calendar is an external validation tool. We brand ourselves with a number and expect to feel a certain way depending on what that number is.

But do we really need a calendar to do that for us? After all, some of us feel younger or older than the age we’re currently assigned.

How you feel is what matters. That is internal validation.

The same goes for many of the external validation tools surrounding weight loss – the scale, counting calories, and even the clock.

You Don’t Need These Tools

When I tell people they don’t need to count calories or weigh themselves to lose weight I get a couple of different reactions…

They don’t believe it’s possible for them to lose weight without these tools.

They aren’t sure how they’ll know how much to eat or if they’re losing weight.

Perfectly normal responses.

Here’s the thing – you are perfectly capable of knowing if you’re making good eating and exercise choices and whether or not you’re making progress.

You don’t need the scale to tell you that you’ve lost 20 pounds. You can figure that out all on your own by seeing yourself in the mirror, noticing how your clothes are fitting, or by paying attention to how your mindset surrounding food or exercise has changed.

If you overeat all day and then weigh yourself, what are you expecting the scale to tell you? “Hey you, you weren’t good today. I’m not very happy with you. Let’s compensate by starving ourselves tomorrow. But since the damage is done let’s go ahead and finish out the night eating what you want. Check in with me again in the morning and I’ll let you know how to feel.”

What, your scale doesn’t talk to you?

You don’t need the scale to tell you that you made poor choices that day. You are capable of self-validating that feeling all on your own.

And counting calories? All that’s doing is externally validating what you think you should be eating.

Even if you count calories you still have to adjust them based on your body’s feedback. Why not just go straight to the source and consciously eat more or less based what what your body says?

If you aren’t making progress does it really matter that you should be eating 1800 calories per day?

No.

Becoming More Self-Aware

You need to become more self-aware of your body. You need to stop depending on external tools to validate your behaviors. You need to learn how to trust yourself instead of an electrical gadget that knows nothing about you.

It’s your body. Get to know it better.

The better you know it, the more confident you’ll become, and the easier it will be to self-validate how you’re feeling.

Self-validation is liberating. Trust yourself to make the right choices and to know if you’re progressing to your goal.

35 Comments

Tony Schober

Hey Everyone,

Just wanted to let you know that if you need more help losing weight you can download my ebook The 10 Forgotten Rules of Weight Loss absolutely free.

I stopped counting calories a couple years ago and won’t be going back. I feel like I’m at a happy weight and I don’t stress out about food anymore. Wasn’t easy at first, but the more you go without tracking calories the less you realize you need to.

Yup, and the more you practice listening to your body instead of placing all your self-awareness into the scale, the more in tune you become with your body’s feedback and the easier it is for you to adjust your food/exercise.

I don’t think the scale is bad. It’s just a thing. It’s the relationship people have with the scale that’s the issue. And it’s really hard to end that toxic relationship when you remain so heavily dependent on it.

If you can weigh yourself without having emotional highs or lows then have at it. But most people can’t. I’ve found the best way to do it is to just put the scale away out of sight. It forces you to listen to your body.

I have no problem having a healthy breakfast (usually eggs in some form), a healthy lunch and a healthy dinner at night with meat normally and vegetables. I just find that in the evening I am always so hungry. I am being very honest in telling you, because you promise to reply, that my husband used to be in the habit of wanting “something nice” to eat every evening, and we used to eat biscuits or some cake, which I believe made me put on weight, because one or two biscuits ended up with too many.

I have completely cut out the biscuits and cake now, and in 6 weeks have lost 13 lbs. Can you suggest what would make me feel less hungry in the evenings? I have tried eating fruit and drinking low calorie drinks, but that doesn’t seem to help.

Only one way to fight hunger – eat more. Either eat more calories or eat more volume. Both have an effect on satiety. I would also look into your satisfaction level from the food you do eat. When you aren’t getting satisfaction from the foods you eat you tend to always want more.

I’ve never had to diet before – I don’t think I ever got on a scale except for when I was pregnant. Now that I have to watch what I eat, I can’t imagine how to “trust my body” since my body isn’t doing what it always did. For example, I was exercising daily and had cut my calorie count to 1200, and ended up gaining weight. I wouldn’t have known it without the scale, since it didn’t seem like I’d gained any weight at all.

Now I have this love-hate relationship with scales and food in general. What a pain. It’s almost easier not to eat then deal with this hassle.

You were just fine without weighing and tracking calories before, so I know you can do it again. 🙂

Not sure on all the details of your program, but gaining weight (not fat) at the beginning of a program is typical, especially when you increase your exercise capacity. The added energy demands force your muscle to hold more glycogen (weight).

Hi Tony,
Am loving your articles, you talk such a lot of sense and its so refreshing not being sold a diet.
I am forwarding your articles on to my daughter/friends who have become obsessed with losing weight and what the scales say, not how they feel.
Please keep them coming.
Thanks
Debbie

When I focus on calories and the scale, I can easily get disappointed in not seeing progress. These days, I do what you recommend in your post. I don’t count calories and the scale does not have control over what I eat or not eat. Becoming self-aware like you mention, has really helped me losen up.

Thank you for another great post. This makes alot of sense, but im not sure id be able to have that much faith in what my body is saying! Surely its too easy to sneak in calories? Also I feel like i need the daily black-and-white goal of a calorie allowance. It is true though that i listen to my body’s feedback anyway, and will eat if im hungry whatever my calorie counting app says!

I keep making excuses, but your so right…..
I do know what I need to eat, and i need to be more disciplined…
I know I can do it.. Thanks for the reminder!!
You always say just the right thing at just the right time..
Just what I needed to hear today
Thanks heaps

I just got a step counter. If 3500-5000 per day is average for an inactive/sedentary person, then I am a slug (sigh) as I don’t even get that and am closer to 2500 on a regular day at home. Having the counter is making me more aware of how little I move and encouraging me to do more. Don’t know if I’ll ever get to 10,000/day though.So far am using the stepper just for motivation and awareness.

I totally agree that listening to your body is the way to go and you don’t need to count calories or use the scale to figure out what to eat on a given day. However, I find the external tools keep me accountable and keep me motivated in the long-term. I’m much less likely to get off track in difficult times when I’m using these tools. There may be other ways to keep up long-term motivation but I haven’t found it yet.

Tony your posts just get better and better! I forward them to other struggling friends. You make so much sense. Currently I am at WW for the kazillionth time:) I do get emotional and at times got tearyeyed over what the scale said. I am 65 and need the lose at least 70 lbs.

Hi Tony,
I just started reading your blog. I’ve been struggling for a while with my weight. I do crossfit 4-5 times a week I know what to eat and what not to eat and I usually stick to making good choices. I’d like to lose at least 10lbs and it’s just not happening. I was just considering buying a Fitbit and counting calories again because I don’t know what else to do. I’m 40 years old and I was thinking maybe this is why the weight won’t come off. A few years ago I did a beach body challenge. The program was T25. I lost 13lbs in 2 months. I’m wondering if I need to do more cardio. Is it possible that crossfit isn’t enough. HELP!!

Hi Melani, if you have solid habits in place then all you need to do is adjust them with a combination of moving more and/or eating less.

Instead of picking the calorie counting back up, trying moving from eating until your 80% full down to stopping when you’re 70% full. You can also try sitting with your hunger a little longer. If you can sit with it for an extra 30 minutes without getting to the point of feeling starved, then you will naturally eat less. Slowing down your eating will also help.

Hi Tony. I have taken your earlier advice on board, thanks so much. Tomorrow i plan to stop calorie counting as im getting so sick of it, and its really not getting me anywhere. As you said, you have to listen to your body anyway, so why put calorie counting in the way of that? I am going to follow these guidelines i decided on: three normal sized meals and three small snacks, focus on nutritious wholefoods, no caffeine, no grazing, start a 20 minute yoga practise, eat slowly and stop when satisfied. I guess it will take me a while to get the hang of it all, but a few guidelines seems less stressful than calorie counting all day. Thanks again. Lucy