My DB and future SIL waited until yesterday to tell me that they're going to take my mom up on her offer to host a rehearsal dinner for their wedding in October. They told me - not her. Although she offered months ago, she assumed that they weren't going to take her up on the offer because every time she's offered advice or an opinion, they've chosen something else entirely or completely ignored her. No worries - it's their wedding, they're paying for it, so she hasn't worried about it.

...BUT...because they aren't registered and they live with my mom (and as far as I know, have no plans to move), there's not a whole lot of room for creativity with a wedding gift. I asked my FSIL what I could do for them, and she had no ideas, but said maybe I could help my mom with the rehearsal dinner.

Call my mom - who is literally across the county until the end of September - and she has had no plans to do anything because they never let her know that they wanted her to. She doesn't know what they might like, who might need to be invited, or anything.

Long story short, I will help my mom, and it will be my gift to my DB and FSIL. What I hadn't planned on (hindsight is 20/20) is having to do everything. I thought, ya' know - maybe help finalize a menu, decorate, pick up a cake, whatever. Instead, it's more like - pick a venue, plan a dinner, finalize a guest list, send out invites, decorate....well, you get the idea.

Seriously, folks. If someone offers to host you a party and you want them to, then you need to say "yes," not just assume that they can read your mind!

One last thing: They're having a lunch-time wedding with the only food being a baked potato bar. I'm more than a little concerned about people going hungry, but it really just makes me want to do everything perfectly for this dinner. We don't all belong in E-Hell.

I did one once and it was a screaming success, but that was for St Patrick's Day. For a wedding? No way.

It is kind of an odd idea. For that to be the entire meal. Now, if they were doing say, a ham, and turkey, and sides, and the baked potato bar, then it sounds amazing! I love baked potatoes, but to find out that was the meal at a wedding reception would strike me as a bit odd. I wouldn't say anything but I can guarentee in a couple of hours, I'm starving.

Kind of reminds me of a wedding reception for a wedding I was in. It was my then BF’s best friend, and I was friendly with the bride. My suspicion was she needed an extra BM so because my BF was the best man, she asked me.

The food at the reception was odd; and none of it went together. We first got a cup of tomato/veggie soup. Then half a cantaloupe filled with chicken salad. Ok, kind of an odd salad choice but whatever. Then I kept waiting for the main course. It wasn’t until they started making noises about cutting the cake and bringing coffee did I realize that was the main course! I should have guessed though since the melon and chicken salad came with a side of broccoli with some kind of red tomatoey stuff on it. But none of it meshed, and it seemed odd. We were all starving later too, and hit the drive through on the way back!

My DB and future SIL waited until yesterday to tell me that they're going to take my mom up on her offer to host a rehearsal dinner for their wedding in October. They told me - not her. Although she offered months ago, she assumed that they weren't going to take her up on the offer because every time she's offered advice or an opinion, they've chosen something else entirely or completely ignored her. No worries - it's their wedding, they're paying for it, so she hasn't worried about it.

...BUT...because they aren't registered and they live with my mom (and as far as I know, have no plans to move), there's not a whole lot of room for creativity with a wedding gift. I asked my FSIL what I could do for them, and she had no ideas, but said maybe I could help my mom with the rehearsal dinner.

Call my mom - who is literally across the county until the end of September - and she has had no plans to do anything because they never let her know that they wanted her to. She doesn't know what they might like, who might need to be invited, or anything.

Long story short, I will help my mom, and it will be my gift to my DB and FSIL. What I hadn't planned on (hindsight is 20/20) is having to do everything. I thought, ya' know - maybe help finalize a menu, decorate, pick up a cake, whatever. Instead, it's more like - pick a venue, plan a dinner, finalize a guest list, send out invites, decorate....well, you get the idea.

Seriously, folks. If someone offers to host you a party and you want them to, then you need to say "yes," not just assume that they can read your mind!

One last thing: They're having a lunch-time wedding with the only food being a baked potato bar. I'm more than a little concerned about people going hungry, but it really just makes me want to do everything perfectly for this dinner. We don't all belong in E-Hell.

Wow, if I was your mom I'd be beyond annoyed. I'd probably tell them that because I was away from home until the end of September, and because they never responded to my offer months ago to host the dinner, it was too late for me to host it now - sorry!

OTOH, if your mom does still want to host the dinner (with your help), I can tell you it doesn't have to be a big deal. First thing to do is to tell DB and FSIL that they need to tell your mom immediately about accepting her offer - that you don't want to be the middle man in this conversation. Next, tell DB and FSIL that you'll need the guest list, with contact info, in 1 week so you can get a head count in time for the caterer.

When my DS got married we held the rehearsal dinner (the rehearsal was at our home) at a lovely Italian restaurant about 4 minutes away from our home, which worked out really well. We did a buffet, and the only decorating I did was to pick up some beautiful potted plants, one for each table, which the guests took home. We did super-simple invitations, and I made up a simple map from our house to the restaurant. The restaurant arranged for the linens, packed up the leftover food, and did a really great job.

Horrible idea, IMHO, if it's the only food option. First, some people are allergic to potatoes. It's an odd one, but anyone who is allergic to anything in that plant family (nightshade?) can't have them. Are they having kids at the wedding? Most younger kids do not like baked potatoes - they'd rather have them in another, deep-fried, form. And while you can make a meal from a baked potato with toppings, IMHO it would feel like their should be something else, like a salad.

I love baked potatoes, but as I grow older, it seems so many people (including me ) are not longer able to eat potatoes due to medical issues. Allergies, starch issues, potassium issues.

It's vegetarian friendly, but I hope they have another veggie option and also enough protein options.

That in this day and age that there are still people who inquire about imaginary due dates, and then have the audacity to argue with you about it...

This weekend I was asked when I was due. I am NOT pregnant. I was not wearing anything that made me even look remotely pregnant. The person then preceded to argue with me about "my condition." Apparently, I'm in denial.

First, I'm on meds that it's a bad idea to be pregnant on. I assure you, it was the first thing checked before the Rx was written. Second, my mother saw me in this outfit last week. If anyone is going to tell me if something I'm wearing is unflattering and/or makes me look pregnant, I assure you all, it's my mother (I love her, but she has no brain to mouth filter when it comes to some things). Third, I have actually lost a few pounds that I had put on due to a previous medication I was on, so I was feeling pretty good. Lastly, the woman had the gall to tell me that I didn't need to be rude about it because I got rather icy with her (which was totally deserved)!

Logged

Meditate. Live purely. Quiet the mind. Do your work with mastery. Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine. ---Gautama Buddah

I keep having to repeat to myself, "It's not your wedding. It's not your wedding. It's not your wedding." As an admitted perfectionist, it's kind of difficult to keep my mouth shut, but I have no desire to wrestle control from the bride and groom, so...

There is someone who lives near us who is incapable of giving their correct address to take away drivers.

There are 2 sets of houses, one on either side of a large building. Lets say they are North Road and South Road. We live at 2 South Road. Every 3 weeks or so, the doorbell rings late in the evening and it's someone delivering pizza or a Chinese or Indian takeaway, which we haven't ordered. It's always for 2 North Road. We get no other deliveries for them, just food. I've told the poor delivery guys to explain to them that their directions are wrong, but it still happens on a regular basis. A couple of times I've gone to their house to tell them what's happening, but they are never in. It maybe that they work shifts, which explains the odd meal times, and I have gone during the day. I'm not going to leave a note for something this little and petty, but d*mnit it's annoying!

There is someone who lives near us who is incapable of giving their correct address to take away drivers.

There are 2 sets of houses, one on either side of a large building. Lets say they are North Road and South Road. We live at 2 South Road. Every 3 weeks or so, the doorbell rings late in the evening and it's someone delivering pizza or a Chinese or Indian takeaway, which we haven't ordered. It's always for 2 North Road. We get no other deliveries for them, just food. I've told the poor delivery guys to explain to them that their directions are wrong, but it still happens on a regular basis. A couple of times I've gone to their house to tell them what's happening, but they are never in. It maybe that they work shifts, which explains the odd meal times, and I have gone during the day. I'm not going to leave a note for something this little and petty, but d*mnit it's annoying!

DH is threatening to say "If it's paid for we'll take it".

Are you sure that the delivery people aren't making the mistake?

And I'd leave the note. If it's worth going to their house a few times to try talking to them, it's worth leaving a note.

There is someone who lives near us who is incapable of giving their correct address to take away drivers.

There are 2 sets of houses, one on either side of a large building. Lets say they are North Road and South Road. We live at 2 South Road. Every 3 weeks or so, the doorbell rings late in the evening and it's someone delivering pizza or a Chinese or Indian takeaway, which we haven't ordered. It's always for 2 North Road. We get no other deliveries for them, just food. I've told the poor delivery guys to explain to them that their directions are wrong, but it still happens on a regular basis. A couple of times I've gone to their house to tell them what's happening, but they are never in. It maybe that they work shifts, which explains the odd meal times, and I have gone during the day. I'm not going to leave a note for something this little and petty, but d*mnit it's annoying!

DH is threatening to say "If it's paid for we'll take it".

Are you sure that the delivery people aren't making the mistake?

And I'd leave the note. If it's worth going to their house a few times to try talking to them, it's worth leaving a note.

GPS puts our office about half a block south of where we actually are, and delivery drivers rely heavily on it. No problem for our regular deliveries, like UPS, but it is for others.

GPS shows three entries into my subdivision - one of them has a fence across it and that fence has been there long enough that it got replaced about three years ago (we moved here in 2005 & it was showing enough fading to show that it was nowhere near new back then). But a friend from out of state has been *tricked* by her GPS three times in five years when she came to visit me (she doesn't always have time when she's in town for a convention - those years, we meet at the convention center).