I don't think there is a main reason. Just lots of little reasons. The reason I didn't for ages is anytime I'd looked for help it was never taken seriously due to my age. Even if I said anything to my mum she'd put it down to age or completly ignore it for ages. Also as good of a thing it is the NHS sucks.

I've been there and it didn't help at all. It's a waste of time going there again. Also, I'm not confident enough to talk to someone that doesn't know me, someone that I don't know, about my deepest most personal feelings. It's what makes me who I am, I don't want anyone messing around with that. They're simply not trust worthy. They tell you it's all in confidence, but they also tell you that if they feel need to worry, then they'll do what they need to do. So, in reality, you can't tell them anything that might actually be threatening, in fear of being sent to a mental home. It doesn't help that most aren't even properly qualified any more. If I speak to somebody about it, then it's no longer mine, and I can lose control which can drive me even deeper. At least at the moment, I have control of my life instead of giving that control to someone else. Some people don't understand that though, and they get pissed at you so f***ing easily, not thinking that there might be reasons that you don't want to talk to someone. If you don't want to and you have reasons for that, then you shouldn't force it. It'll only make things worse. If you feel you might benefit though, then there's no reason you shouldn't try.

Fear to be judged - I seemed to get judged on what i've done in the past instead of being judged for the way I am at the time.

Most health care professionals are ignorant (or stupid) - A few years ago the hospital tried to get me to seek help, i outright refused. A few days later i got realised and was told to see my doctor for a blood test. Went to see my doctor for a blood test, he asked why you want that, i told him the hospital told me too, then he asked why were you in hospital? I told him because I tried to commit suicide and just got realised from the hospital a few days ago. He told me I had to go over the road to the local hospital for the blood test and then simply watched me walk out the door without even asking why i tried to commit suicide in the first place.....WTF?!?!? (aren't doctors supposed to help us and check that we're sane and alright before letting us leave when there told something like that?). I bet you can see why I outright refused to seek help in the first place even before seeing my doctor.

Only I can help myself, even if it means suicide - I trust no-one and can't be bothered with life anymore, I have no interest in it. Life is simply boring and theres no fun in it anymore.

Fear of failure and being judged. I don't really like getting help and I have a hard time talking to people. So basically saying "I'm constantly sad and want to kill myself" to someone is nearly impossible.

I saw four shrinks during my stay at the mental hospital. The first shrink i saw was friday, then he left for the week end... The next morning another shrink came to see me and asked the same damn questions as the previous one. He talked to me for a whole 5 mins.... Then i wouldn't have any news on wtf is going on till tuesday. All of them pretty much just ask me wtf is wrong with me and just left the room. The last one was a woman and my main appointed shrink. She asked me what's wrong with me and as i tried to explain in details I could see the annoyed expression on her face. I wrote down 2 pages worth of explanations and tried to read it to her, she gave me that "hurry up, i have somewhere to be" look.

I also contacted a lawyer to see if they had the right to keep me longer than 72 hours. The lawyer was very accomodating and nice. She told me she's sending me all the required information through a fax. I asked the nurse to retrieve the fax and she told me she can't leave the room right now. Took a full day before i got the papers from the lawyer.

I chose lack of money - if I could afford to go 'private' I'm sure I'd get better treatment. The NHS doesn't provide decent mental health services because it can't afford to. Our whole health care system is in a mess and the mental health side of things is appalling.

I'm really lucky in that I have a fantastic GP. When I'm ill, he makes me go into see him every week and he always spends as much time as necessary with me. I always see the same doctor. I've been seeing him (on and off) for well over ten years and probably more like 15.

He's great but the psychiatry dept in the local hospital is awful. I don't want to go anymore but my GP insists that he needs their input so I have to. I never see the same psychiatrist. Everytime I go, I'm kept waiting at least half an hour and then I have to start 'at the beginning' because it's someone I've never seen before. I have to answer the same questions every time. No, I don't see or hear things. No the television isn't talking to me, No, I don't think I have super human powers. It's ridiculous.

When I get so bad that I'm suicidal, they just hand over the valium for a couple of weeks. They constantly swap my meds and the doses of my meds and I get stuck in a cycle of trying to get used to new side effects and trying to work out a dose that doesn't either turn me into a zombie or ensure that I don't sleep for days on end.

I think that there's a lot of ignorance amongst the medical profession, even the ones who work in Mental Health itself. GP's like mine are rare. Have you ever noticed that websites for doctors surgeries often tell you that one doctor is a specialist in pregnancy, another works with diabetes etc. They never have one who specialises in Mental Health issues.

Finally, I'm a bit 'been there, done that'. I've lived with this illness for nearly 40 years. I've tried just about everything and it still comes back. It always will. So I'm tired and at the moment I'm not sure how much longer I can go on.

I've got a decant country doc, seen him about 6 times in the last 4 years.
He actually called me first. He'd seen some of my logwork, so I built him a 5 bay timberframed carport...
Then went in for a piece of steel that got into me, some paralysis- got to see a neurologist- then going down the rabbit hole 2 years ago...
Saw him last in the winter, a year ago. He came out to my place, haddnt seen it. We talked about drugs and trucks.
Other than a few scrips -remeron, klon, flexeril, no mental health care.
I havnt seen a pdoc.

I have a great therapist and psychiatrist but I just don't want the help anymore. I want to be left alone and when I say alone I mean alone. No one can help me, everybody has plans for me, other than me. If I cut I cut, if I kill myself so be it. I have made my choice and I wish everybody would just back off.

There are so many variables in the mental health "profession." Dumb docs and lack of money have been a big problem for me. I've been to therapists since I was 15 and I'm 53 now.

I kept trying to make life better for myself and I read a lot of self help books, went to work, kept house, and raised kids. I kept thinking it had to pay off somewhere.

I credit God for my getting as far as I have. I've prayed to him more and more as the years progressed. I have a physical illness in my brain that has been exacerbated by some life circumstances. It will never go away.

I have a neighbor who has MS. I'd rather have depression even with the crap I've been through.

Today, I go to weekly group therapy for cognitive therapy which is the only therapy that makes sense to me. I also take my meds. The meds available now are so much better than when I started taking them.