The Emperor of Bleen
is the undisputed ruler of the Mighty Bleen Empire. His power extends to
a full quarter of the Milky Way galaxy. As one might imagine, maintaining
such a vast conquest as the Bleen Empire creates somewhat of an employment
shortage. This has opened a number of Employment Opportunities for some
of Bleen's more modestly gifted citizens.

The Acolytes are the
loyal courtiers of the Bleen Emperor. Privy to every critical decision
made by the Emperor himself, they ensure that he is kept up to date with
all matters of Empire, War and the annual bonus situation. While theoretically
a source of detailed information spanning all the Empire's official business,
they also have a disturbing awareness of fares and schedules for all flights
leaving Bleen to parts afar.

Initially only a modest functionary
within the Bleen Empire, Vexxarr has been offered an opportunity
to prove himself to crown and country. By conquering Earth, a distasteful
brackish world at the outer rim of the Milky Way galaxy, Vexxarr can win
a top position within the Bleen army. Unfortunately, both the Emperor and
Vexxarr have underestimated the mammalian infestation of this damp, little
world. This oversight will eventually spell disaster for Bleen while perhaps
offering Vexxarr an opportunity he would otherwise have never been given.

An indispensable adjunct to
every marauding overlord, Minionbot 107 is Vexxarr's right er tentacle
man er robot. Whatever. The Minionbot series is programmed with
an apparently endless database of alien worlds, cultures, military history
and sage advice. Unfortunately, due to the nature of its imprinted behavior
and survival subroutines, Minionbot is just as likely to use this data against
its master as not. As a result, the Minionbot series has the dubious distinction
of being the "most often ejected into space by way of open airlock"
of any of the autonomous servantbots produced by the cybernetic industries
of Bleen.

While not a true character per
se, the American Military and armies of the world prove to
be an unexpected variable in the Bleen equation for global conquest. It
seems that when a culture spends the balance of its history advancing the
art of self-extermination, that culture tends to look dimly upon uninvited
outsiders. Bottom line: in a fight between two different cultures - even
ones with wildly divergent technological sophistication - victory always
favors the side with the most practice.

A highly advanced
(if not evolved) race of galactic conquerors, THE BLEEN are extremely
territorial and highly aggressive. Hybridized cnidaria, the Bleen are soft
bodied, partially symmetrical and exhibit an odd cake fixation. They reproduce
asexually by budding. The podlings, which eventually drop off the parent,
differentiate and grow to adulthood (assuming they are not punitively re-ingested)
through three, general stages - podling, immature and adult. The Bleen are
masters and engineers of a millennia-old empire that continues to expand
across the middle bands of the Milky Way galaxy. The Bleen bow to an hereditary
Emperor who acts as the center of all military activity throughout the Empire.
Their technology, while interesting and formidable, lacks any sort of subtlety.
They like things that lumber and generally make loud noises.

The dominant species
of Epsilon Beta Shlumpy, Shlumpoids are an extremely artistically
and technologically advanced species. They are the architects of an impressively
advanced, planet-wide civilization on their sole home world (despite
having no observable manipulating appendages of any description). Governed
by a benign matriarch, the whole of Shlumpoid society seems to cooperate
for the collective good, differentiating themselves by class and specialization
only as the need arises. Shlumpoid biology seems to be subtle if not entirely
vague. While some form of sexual congress is used to reduce genetic homogeny,
the Shlumpoids seem to lack a clear definition of male and female. It is
possible that they may develop as one of several genders, some or all of
them necessary to pass the genome along to successive Shlumpoid generations.
The Shlumpoids themselves seem confused by the issue of gender and would
rather discuss how your turtleneck makes them feel about their chosen career
path. While Shlumpoids can exhibit nearly paralyzing emotional psychosis
themselves, their chief means of defense seems to be their ability to project
such psychosis on would-be invaders. This attack is capable of rendering
whole armies ineffective. While not psionic in the strictest sense, victims
of this attack seem to succumb to a crushing sense of ennui.

Sid - short
for Silicon Dioxide - is a member of a silicon based prey species inhabiting
an asteroid drift deep within the Horse Head Nebula. The sole food source
of the silicoid predators that also inhabit the drift, Sid's species exists
in a fragile balance between extinction and a near-constant state of terror.
The life cycle of the rock crabs (as Sid's species has come to be
known) progresses from a rock-like egg, to a fully functional hatchling
adult to a moon-sized matriarch that presumably lays the rock-like eggs.
Exactly how the adults become moon-sized adults or which are chosen to become
matriarchs is unknown. The life cycle is so similar to that of the competing
predator species that is must be assumed that both share a common ancestor
or one evolved from the other.

The rock crabs derive life-sustaining
energy from differentials of available energy such as sunlight, heat or
electricity. The rock crab's anatomy (if it can be called that) is a layered
stratum of polarized silicon dioxides separated by an ion permeable boundary.
In their native environment, the rock crabs seek shadow and place themselves
half in and half out to feed. Bridging the boundary between light and
dark creates a cross current within their bodies. This process works with
differentials in air temperature and surface static. It is possible that
they are able to convert kinetic energy into food but this has yet to
be observed. Due to this peculiar feeding process it is possible for the
rock crabs to starve in any environment in absolute equilibrium. They
would starve in a space uniformly hot just as easily as they might a space
uniformly cold. Photonic feeding is less of a problem as rock crabs can
cast shadows on themselves using their own anatomy if the need arises.

Because the rock crabs do not
themselves eat, they fear any species that does. Further
because they believed themselves to be the only prey in the universe,
they have a hard time coming to terms with other food sources that do
not feel fear or pain. In short, they try to make friends with anything
in the pantry.

Sharing the same
drift as the rock crabs is a species of silicoid predator. Possibly
an evolutionary cousin of the rock crabs themselves, the silicoid predators
are singularly adapted to rending and digesting the rock crabs mineral bodies.
So efficient is the silicoid predator that it does not excrete physical
waste. For this reason, when offered a far more energetic source of food
- refined sugar for example - the end result is biologically disastrous
and literally explosive.

The life cycle of the silicoid
predator is not fully understood. Only the predator moon 'mother' and
the motile predatory offspring have so far been observed. The predator
moon is capable of independent motion, using stored energy to create electromagnetic
thrust. The predator moon carries her young around in her cavernous maw
seeking out the far less mobile mother rock of the rock crabs. It should
be noted that unlike the rock crab 'mother rock', the predator moon is
incapable of feeding on her own. Instead, she sends her offspring off
to hunt then eats select individuals upon their return. It is presumed
that a high birth rate refreshes the supply of immature hunters.

Caesium, which is found in
trace amounts in the rock crab's biology, builds up to abundance in the
outer shell of the mature predator moon. The corpses of predator moons
are a rich source of caesium as well as many other minerals that accumulate
over aeons of feeding on the helpless silicoid crabs. Of course, before
attempting to land one should be quite sure the moon is - in fact - dead.