December 4, 2009

I had a eureka! moment last night. Tiger was not awake when he crashed his car. This is why he was said to be snoring in the street by the neighbor in the police report. He probably is using ambien and "sleepwalked" the whole thing. His wife probably broke the window to attempt to wake him up, following him out of the house, but obviously being behind enough in time that he already had gotten in and started the car. This type of thing is a very common side effect of ambien. He can't sleep because his wife had already found out about the girlfriends.... I'm surprised I haven't seen this explanation offered by anyone.

Here's a news article saying he was sleeping and snoring in the street after the crash:

They found Woods apparently unconscious in the street, while his wife, Elin Nordegren, standing nearby. Woods was shoeless, in a T-shirt and shorts.

"He was actually snoring," [a witness] said.

Sleeping and snoring in the street after all that? You don't snore when you're knocked unconscious, do you? That sounds like a sleeping drug, which also explains how the highly skilled Woods could drive so badly.

From Radar: "[Rachel] Uchitel told friends that she and Tiger liked to have sex while taking the drug Ambien. Uchitel told one pal, 'You know you have crazier sex on Ambien — you get into that Ambien haze. We have crazy Ambien sex.'" Readers: Is that a thing? We've witnessed people in an Ambien haze, certainly. But Ambien sex? This makes us feel old not knowing this.

Is it all fitting together now?

ADDED: The emailer was Elliott Althouse (no relation). And, in the comments, several people say that a person unconscious with a head injury might snore.

Yes, I feel old. Pharma rules the world today. Drug induced mind blowinf sex, or whatever, is a waste of human potential. This will hurt Tigers image more than any affairs. Now no one will want to see him as a role model.

Ambien sex is real, no doubt about it. But it only fits the story if he was physically caught having sex with one of those mistresses, while on Ambien. Perhaps he requires Ambien to sleep, and the fight started (ended) while he was already under the influence. But the idea that his wife was trying to save him by knocking out the windows? That seems implausible - there are reports that substantial damage was done in the home before he fled/left. It just doesn't add up... which is why it is all so interesting...

Again: snoring is a known reaction to a head injury. It is actually quite a serious matter. Of course Tiger will never be able to disprove the Ambien theory. You could say that's unfair to him, but it's also another consequence of his reckless behavior. It seems our Tiger is quite a complex fellow.

The scuttlebutt in the golf industry is now that there are more "transgressions" to be revealed, including some rather exotic ones in Dubai and Thailand, both places where the sex can get pretty exotic.

Ann, I would like to think that you're classier than this. Speculation about the Tiger Woods accident and any possible relationship with marital difficulties or common prescription drugs belongs in a tabloid, not on your blog.

"Here, before we do this, let's take Ambien.""Okay. Why?""To make the sex better.""Huh?""Yeah, I think I would enjoy sex with you more if I were sleepy and in a daze. Being nearly unconscious would be ideal.""Oh.

there are reports that substantial damage was done in the home before he fled/left

No there aren't, there are rumors and innuendo. This thing turned into farce days ago when the husband-abuse-is-bad crowd used the exploit-a-celebrity and make-shit-up feminist tactics to further their cause.

(I think the Ambien theory sounds very plausible. It also explains why this would happen at two in the morning and not at ten or eleven at night.)

Ambien dosen't put you in a daze, though. I've had experience with Ambien sleep walkers, they can have lucid conversations and you can't tell they're sleep walking. There's no zombie like behavior or drifting in and out of consciousness. If he was snoring it was most likely that he was drunk and passed out.

@art.the.nerd said It's funny when a commenter none of us remembers seeing before tells me what supposedly belongs on this blog. This post has numerous elements that are recurrent subjects on this blog: golf, drugs, driving, sex, marriage, evidence...

"Ambien dosen't put you in a daze, though. I've had experience with Ambien sleep walkers, they can have lucid conversations and you can't tell they're sleep walking. There's no zombie like behavior or drifting in and out of consciousness. If he was snoring it was most likely that he was drunk and passed out."

It's disturbing like what Jeffrey Dahmer did:

"The killing was just a means to an end. That was the least satisfactory part. I didn't enjoy doing that. That's why I tried to create living zombies with . . . acid and the -- the drill." Other interviews revealed that he simply did not want his victims to leave him. So he devised a plan whereby he would drill holes into the brain of his drugged victim and pour acid into the frontal lobes in hopes of creating a lobotomized zombie. He explained, "I wanted to see if it was possible to make -- again, it sounds really gross -- uh, zombies, people that would not have a will of their own, but would follow my instructions without resistance. So after that, I started using the drilling technique."

I have been using Ambien for my sleep apnea for a few years, and I have had sex. But never have I had sex while under Ambien's influence . . . hell, I don't eat or drive or do any of those things people report while using Ambien.

Well, I do snore, according to my wife and others who have had to sleep in close proximity.

Is that so? What is the pre-sleep effect of Ambien? I thought you just fall into a dead sleep right away. How is that any fun unless only one person takes it and the other person is enjoying having his way with a will-less dead weight.

2) Does this role-model-fail mean that Tiger will be Asian again? He's been black since he started winning. Now, the whites should adopt him. He's got the country club thing going on and his wife is a Nordic goddess.

I think there is more to this lack of consciousness than we know. One thing that makes me very suspicious is the fact that Woods would not meet with the police. One reason for not meeting with them immediately is to avoid giving a urine sample. One of the commenters has indicated that his snoring is associated with a severe brain injury. That is true and you usually die or have very impaired function as time goes by. The easier explanation is that his wife had been on his case all day. From what I have been told, the best way of taking care of that situation is to pull out a very big roach and proceed to get stoned. I don't do this but the people I have seen that do have the reaction as described. If he interviewed the police, then he might be looking at a DUI. In addition, his wife could have gotten a domestic citation.

Woods is news and needs to be discussed. The reason is that he failed us. We allow our kids to aspire to be like this person and with his moral failure our children need to see the consequence of such actions. These actions should be severe to get the message across. As to the police handling of the problem, that should be called. I doubt that anyone reading this would have received kid glove care like he did.

In a weird way, I'm actually starting to feel a little sorry for this guy. He must have really hated the life he made for himself and this was the way he created to get out of it, subconsciously, of course.

And before anybody asks, this isn't meant as a defense, quite the opposite. He has humiliated his wife, family, and made things very rough for his kids. But, damn, to do everything you can to destroy yourself says something about his mental state.

Yes Professor you are probably right so let me correct the statement that "now no one will want to see him as a role model again ". It should say that now no one who lives a golfer's life will want to see him as a role model any more than they do John Daly. And multitudes who like all night semi-conscious sex will see him as their new role model, but they never got up for early Saturday morning tee times anyway. I am feeling much older.

"One of the commenters has indicated that his snoring is associated with a severe brain injury."

No. I said snoring can be associated with a head injury. I did not say severe. Any loss of consciousness can result in snoring. Where the loss of consciousness involves a head injury, snoring can be evidence of a more severe injury, but can also result from a quickly recoverable KO.

While the accident at the end of the driveway is curious, there are many possible ways it could have happened--rapid acceleration and loss of control, inattention or distraction being obvious possibilities.

I took Ambien briefly quite a while ago and did not like it. I felt groggy and out of it the next day. It does put you out pretty quickly. I was sleeping alone at the time so have no sex stories to tell.

Wikipedia says that "[r]ecreational users claim that "fighting" the effects of the drug by forcing themselves to stay awake will sometimes cause vivid visuals and a body high." That might explain the sex enhancement.

"Ann, I would like to think that you're classier than this. Speculation about the Tiger Woods accident and any possible relationship with marital difficulties or common prescription drugs belongs in a tabloid, not on your blog."

It would have been better if you'd worked in the fact that Althouse is a law professor. The traditional version is, "...and you, a law professor!"

Maybe next time, you might want to try something like, "[This] belongs in a tabloid, not on the blog of a law professor!" Something like that.

"Woods is news and needs to be discussed. The reason is that he failed us. We allow our kids to aspire to be like this person and with his moral failure our children need to see the consequence of such actions."

I read stuff like this and I think I'm from another planet. I'm pretty sure I never allowed my kids to draw deep lessons from the life of a guy who hits a ball with a stick. He's an athlete, that's right up there with stripper and acrobat as far as I'm concerned-- entertainment, but nothing serious.

It fits together better with the Ambien but it is still a bit fuzzy to me.

Someone in a previous thread linked the crash report from the police. I had gone over and looked at it and was puzzled. The time is shown as (IIRC) around 2:30am. It shows him driving out of his driveway, running over a median, heading over to his left to an intersecting street, overshooting the turn, having a couple of impacts with fixed objects before coming to rest after hitting a tree in his next door neighbor's yard.

Assuming these are very nice large houses, a safe assumption I think, we're talking about maybe a couple hundred yards of travel. Ambien would explain why he was running into fixed objects all over the place at 2:30am. Someone above suggests the girlfriend was texting him and the wife was reading it while he was asleep. OK, if that's true I now get why he's fleeing the house at 2:30am after taking a sleeping pill.

The lack of a DUI charge could be explained by the private security response to the scene prior to the police arriving. Gated neighborhood Security shows up, packs him off to the hospital and calls police.

So yeah, it starts to fit together better now. What I'm still not quite getting is the golf club assault. Mrs. Woods, in the driveway, with a 9-iron I guess.

This all happened at 2:30 am. Something was going on in that home before the crash. Scenario: Tiger came home late after a night of Ambien sex with some mistress and was caught by his wife. A big fight ensued that became physical. Tiger tried to flee but wife chased him with golf club. Trying to dodge her, Tiger crashed. After the crash, it took some time for the ambulance to arrive and under the influence of the Ambien, Tiger laid down fell asleep.

Tiger's wife caught wind of what had been happening, Ambien sex and all. Like a Siren, she lured him into taking Ambien with the promise of great sex.

BUT! When Tiger was sufficiently groggy, she attacked him scratching and kicking. He tried to escape the escapade in his Escalade. Due to the effects of the Ambien, he didn't get far and Elin was right behind, club in hand.

Tiger getting into a car accident in his gated community -- boring. Tiger swerving all over the place with his Escalade, hitting a fire hydrant and tree whilst being chased by his crazyass Viking wife with a loft wedge, after a night of Ambien-fueled sex -- NOW THAT'S A STORY.

This one seems to have run its course, but I would note that the appeal of Ambien sex is that you *struggle* sleep during intercourse. It creates a high, a lasting high. No one falls asleep. It isn't like having sex with a dead fish. Think of a time when you were really tired, but you really wanted sex, and had it. That's what it's like. Apparently, a lot of readers here are surprised by how common it is (not that it is that common, but it is something that is known to be done by "younger" people)...

The fact the he snored while on his back, and was taking Ambien, and with the smallish size of his jaws, he most likely has a sleep-breathing problem. Take a look at his pictures on my post about this issue:http://doctorstevenpark.com/what-you-can-learn-from-tiger-woods-snoring

If you look at his father's facial features, he most likely had obstructive sleep apnea.