In fact, to some of you, I was old enough to have my first hair around my willy just as you were being born.

That is scary.

Aside from being old, however, I am also miserable as I didn't get either of the things I really wanted... A puppy or a camel.

I had intended to train the camel to spit at people I dislike. Instead, I have had to spend the day playing new Xbox games (which aren't quite as fun).

Should you wish to offer me congratulations on being old (and closer to death), kindly do so in the space provided below especially for it. Please be aware, though, that 41 of my 272 Facebook friends have already beaten you to it.

Thank you and goodbye - I must now go and eat my birthday doughnut (YES! THAT IS HOW YOU SPELL IT, SHUT UP!)

I can't say you were born after I had hair on my willy, but there's just a few months discrepancy between both events, which changed the world so tremendously.

Sorry to hear that you didn't get your own camel and had to make do with those mediocre birthday activities most of us commoners have to deal with, such as eating cake/doughnuts (not written "donots" or some such silly thing) or playing games. Or receiving (virtual) birthday greetings.

The "making the camel spit at people"-comment gave me bad images, especially since your first comment was about hair on your willy. I guess birthday sex isn't unheard of!