Still haven’t got your mitts on our brand new Calendar issue? Then you’re probably about to get a very real urge to kick yourself hard in the shins when you see what fist-biting sexiness we’ve got going on, because it’s only stuff you can get if you go and buy the magazine right now.

Miley Cyrus’ twerking best mate shows why she’s very likely to be exploding all over the world very bloody soon as our stupidly hot FHM Would Wife.

Meet the fittest woman on the planet. No, seriously, internet-famous fitness guru Paige actually is the fittest woman on the planet. Just ask her 1.2 million Instagram followers. #gymselfie, anyone?

FHM institution and cover star Keeley Hazell’s still off living the LA dream. Sigh. If only we could get her to come back to the UK. Pick up this month’s mag to read all about Keeley’s first ever striptease attempt and a whole load of other Californian dreamin’ brilliance…

Modelling runs in the family for Serbian-Croation beauty Tamara, who graces the back pages of the mag this month. We’re really glad she took it upon herself to carry on the tradition.

Sponsored by The Bluebeards Revenge and featuring the likes of Kim Kardashian and Millie Mackintosh, you won’t be able to get through 2015 without this line up of lovely ladies reminding you each morning what day it actually is…