Friday, August 30, 2013

A Blog About Nothing

Late this morning I opened up my Blogger page to start writing. It is 4:30 now and the blank page is still staring into space. I would say it's staring at me, but I just finally sat down. Here's the story of how my day went so far, and why this was fated to become a blog about nothing.

Ginger left the house before noon to apply for some jobs and do the grocery shopping. That left me here with my 5 year old, YaYa, and my 1 month old, Link. Normally this would not be a problem, and I'd have plenty of time to write, but Link has not been feeling good so he's been quite fussy. Usually he wakes up, takes a bottle, lifts weights for half an hour, smokes a cigar, and goes back to bed. But today he will only take a little bit of a bottle at a time and is only sleeping in shorts spurts, not leaving me enough time to write. Also, YaYa is trying her hand at nuclear fission, and I have to keep putting down what I'm doing to help her find the atoms that she dropped on the floor. Kids!

I had given YaYa her lunch, I had fed Link while watching a bunch of Buster Keaton shorts, and I had eaten lunch, too. Everyone had a full belly and was content for the moment. I sat down to write, though I hadn't really settled on a topic yet. I knew I didn't have much time to write, so I considered the first thing that popped into my head, which was Shemp Howard, my favorite Stooge. (I guess if I was a Ghostbuster, we would have battled a giant Shemp at the end of the first movie instead of Stay-Puft). I figured another Stooge-related post would be okay after the heaviness of my rant on Monday. But before I even had a chance to commit to this idea, Link started raising a ruckus.

Flash forward maybe an hour or two. Time hasn't really existed for me today. I had another chance to sit down, and by this time I had thought about one of my favorite types of stories. I enjoy any type of book or film in which a character is transported into an alternate dimension, world, or what-have-you. I was going to write up three reviews/recommendations for some b-movie favorites that fall into this category. Of course, I couldn't remember the name of one of them, just the plot and that Richard Kiel was in it. But before I even had a chance to start digging through my massive b-movie collection to find it, Link started raising a ruckus.

I was now aware that I was running out of time to get this done before I had to leave for work. I settled on putting some of my poetry up on the blog, though I haven't seen the little notebook I write my poems in for months. I started searching for it, but the only thing I accomplished was bumping my head on a beam in the attic. After a brief fit of cursing and muttering I gave up on the poetry idea. I decided to settle on a new idea. But before I even had a chance to start brainstorming...

No! Not Link this time. Mama Pancake returned home with a trunk full of groceries. She stocked up because our cabinets have been looking kinda bare, so the bags were rather heavy. Once more I had to put the blog aside. Now that I'm done moving all the heavy shit from the car into the house, I have to get ready to go to work and move heavy shit from the dock into trucks. At least when I lift heavy stuff at home I'm not being micro-managed by a living ulcer, but on the other hand, I don't get paid when I do it at home.

Well, that's that. This is all I have time for. I typed this up at a furious rate, and I don't even have time to proofread it, so forgive any typos or nonsensical thoughts you may have come across while reading. (I might proofread it when I get home, if I remember.) Alright... Done!