Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness are Not Size Dependent

We already know that the cultural stigma, oppression, and bullying of fat people is extremely profitable to the diet industry and that people like Jillian Michaels, Steve Siebold, and Paul Plakas have made millions off of fat bullying and oppression – trying to solve social stigma through weight loss which is essentially just giving the bully your lunch money and hoping he beats you up less. Obviously I think this is disgusting.

What I see more and more of is politicians using fat people to gain political points. It seems to go like this – the politician wants to do something that scores them points and avoids having to spin a possible downside. Since the country is already whipped into a fat hating frenzy, they just go after fat people with some random untested policy that promises to rid the world of us whether we like it or not. Luckily for them the diet industry has spent years convincing people (including fat people) that we should not be trusted to tell our own stories, so this works out great for them.

So New York City Mayor Bloomberg supports a ridiculous law saying that people in restaurants can’t buy sugary drinks more than 16 ounces. No word on how much ice has to be in the drink and of course people can add as much sugar to their giant coffee or tea as they want, and it doesn’t affect convenience stores so you can go across the street from the restaurant to a 7-11 and buy a quintuple big gulp 2 gallon barrel of Mountain Dew (and I’m not shaming you if you do it, I’m a writer – I’ve been there). It apparently doesn’t matter that there is not strong evidence that the ban will do anything for health outcomes of anybody, or do anything other than cause restaurants to pay for an extra cup and straw for people to buy 2 drinks putting more garbage into circulation. But what the hell, he gets to say that he is “doing something about obesity.” To show how foolproof this is, Mayor Bloomberg announced the initiative on the same day that he went around celebrating…wait for it… Donut Day. So he spent half the day saying that businesses should be limited in the size of drinks that they can serve because of big bad fatties, and the other half of the day getting photographed eating donuts. And people still cheered his “hardline stance” on obesity. Nice spin if you can get it.

Michelle Obama makes the probably well-intentioned but absolutely horrible decision to wage war on fat children. She does this while simultaneously supporting an anti-bullying campaign and sees no dissonance between the tw0 (even though appearance, including weight, is the number one reason that kids are bullied.) Then she goes on notorious weight bully Dr. Oz’s show and says that fat people are the greatest threat to national security, then gets credit for working to end this greatest threat. That’s like me saying that I think that lack of hummus is the greatest threat to National Security, then saying “Hey, I just made hummus so everybody praise me.” What the hell? And she does it knowing that the media is unlikely to call her out on it, not because they don’t agree that she is wrong or out of touch, but because they don’t want to point it out and risk their relationship with the White House.

I do not want to let this go without comment. Fat people are people, we deserve to be treated with respect and dignity and that includes not being used to score cheap political points. Let’s put an end to fatty hunting season and let’s do it now – when you see this kind of thing consider speaking up, pointing it out and telling your actual story.

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I’ve long despised Ms Obama for my own reasons, but when she started her Anti-Obesity project, that’s when I completely lost respect for her even as a human being. In fact, one of the issues of :a certain magazine arrived in my mailbox last month with her giant face on the cover, and it riled me so much that I took a black sharpie and drew sunglasses, a curlicue beard, missing teeth, and scars all over her face. Very childish, I know, but I couldn’t stand having her staring at me whenever I went into the bathroom!

Your comment about “bathroom reading” reminded me of an essay I read years ago about the original 19th-century Sears Roebuck catalogues. Apparently, one letter they received asked SR to “go back to using the other kind of paper, the new stuff is not as absorbent and I’m having to use three sheets now when one or two used to do.”

Saturday was the neighborhood block party (why yes, I do live in an episode of Leave It To Beaver, why do you ask?) and I baked up a storm all week for it. I love to bake, I’m really good at it, I have the time on my hands, and I don’t get the chance often to pull out all the stops.

So I bring out a pile of tasty desserts, and about half the people there light up and start digging in. But this year, the other half all seemed to think they needed to Say Something to me about it. One woman felt the need to tell me that her son ate like a horse as a teenager, but of course he didn’t get fat because he stopped eating when he wasn’t hungry anymore.

And that’s when I leveled The Stare at her and said “That’s what I do, too. But I come from a long line of fat people and that’s why I’m fat.” Then I poured the smile back on and continued the conversation on another subject.

Eat my cake. Don’t eat my cake. That’s up to you. But don’t you dare use my cake as an excuse to tell me how I eat, how I live my life, and why my baking a lot of delicious goodies for a festive occasion where a large number of people need to be fed is A Very Bad Thing.

Oh, and out of the layer cake, tart, galette, and batch of yummy scones I baked? I brought two slices of cake back into the house at the end of the party. What’s more, I saw a lot of smiles from people who had a slice of something delicious.

Yes, next year I’ll go bonkers with the baking again. I’ll spend my entire week baking. I love to bake, I’m damn good at it, and it’s up to me how I spend my time.

Anyone who doesn’t want to eat it is cordially invited to simply not put any on their plates, and leave both me and the people who do choose to eat my goodies in peace.

I prefer to live in a home on a large lot and not in a neighborhood, but if I decided to live in a neighborhood I would prefer to live next door to you!

Baking was a part of my upbringing as well. I have some breads, cookies, pies and cakes that I bring to all the major family functions. Through the years I’ve heard more and more of the negative, *sigh* “I shouldn’t be eating this” or “just a small slice”… but low and behold, they are always all consumed. I wish we could just enjoy the goodies without all the commentary. I will do my best to facilitate positive food discussion this year!

1. To utilize time and energy dreaming this up — never mind enforcing it, how *is* that supposed to work? — they’ve obviously solved all the crime.

2. Oh why stop there? Why not restrict the size of beer servings? It can be argued that’s a *better* idea. I go to a 7-11 and swallow a 60oz cup of Mountain Dew, I burp a lot. I go to a 7-11 and suck down a like amount of beer, I will probably wrap the car around a tree *and* burp a lot. Burping < Car-Wrapping+Burping

As to the First Lady, I think she's a nice lady who's got an uncommon big stage to act out some significant issues. That's her business; that she's also making it everyone else's is wrong. Speaking personally, I took *quite* enough crap for my weight from my classmates. I don't think having to take it from the teachers would've done anything but make certain psychological issues much worse.

I have been totally disgusted with Dr. oz and michelle obama. Not to mention blumberg. NO caps for them. I do not respect them at all. It is hard to believe it is so bad. HOw bad does it have to get before something is going to change? HOw many more teens are going to die to get the attention of people? Im past beyond anger. I am so frustrated. I will continue to do my part.
PS I had a person approach me at a cancer event and mentioned something about cancer and being fat. WTHell does that mean?
Why do people thing fat causes cancer?

Years ago, at a family reunion, one of my cousins said that I needed to come live with him and his family and we’d ‘be skinny in no time!’. My sister said, ‘No thanks! We’ve tried The Humiliation Diet, and it doesn’t work!’