“Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University”

February 11, 2013

So the headline reads.

These sorts of stories always catch my eye, because in my years of reporting on gender trends I have learned that the facts behind the story are often more complex than the headline would imply. The first thing I assume in reading a headline like this, is that whatever bathroom incident occurred, it did NOT occur in a mensroom. I make this assumption because I’ve never seen a “bathroom incident” reported where a male transgender was “abused” or ejected from a men’s bathroom.

One would think with the transgender movement’s primary, number one issue being male access to women’s lavatories and locker rooms (and other public spaces segregated by sex for female protection against male predation) that the evidence of NEED to access such spaces- for example evidence of attacks on those males who wear female clothes into men’s lavatories- would be widespread. Or at least exist at all. To my knowledge no such incidents have been reported. I have asked trans activists repeatedly to provide evidence of the danger to males using male restrooms, even if they wear women’s clothes, but none has ever been able to locate any cited incident.

If there is criminal report involving a male transgender and a restroom it is pretty much assured that the incident involved women taking issue with a member of the violence and rape class (males) inserting himself into spaces sex-segregated to keep him out.

As transgender male rights activists are fond of pointing out: laws don’t prevent all crime from happening (much as laws against speeding don’t cause all drivers to obey the speed limit). Men still rape, assault, murder, peep, install hidden cameras, etc. in women’s restrooms BY THE SCORES even with laws against it. I can cite dozens if not hundreds of such reported, citable cases on a weekly basis, 52/365, even though such “incidents” are so common they are seldom reported, much less investigated. Some of those cases involve transgender males.

Are all males (including the transgender variety) violent rapists? No. Of course not. But a shockingly high percentage of males are, and females (those of us who have survived so far) are very well aware of this objective fact every waking moment of our lives. We are aware every time we walk to our car in a parking lot, when we go out alone at night, when we leave our drink at the bar, when we accept a lift home from that seemingly nice man, when we see that guy talking to our kids. Every time a woman leaves home – or even IN her home: are the windows locked? Drapes pulled?- she measures her proximity to her impending rape, torture, murder, by those committing rape, torture, murder at an epidemic rate: Males. And she knows her rape, torture, murder, should it occur, will likely go completely unpunished by the male power structures that she will appeal to for protection and justice. Every woman knows this, in every country, every region, every town and neighborhood and home. So when we read the headline “Trans Woman student Abused and shoved out of toilets” we know it really means “Women acted with self-preservation against male who behaved in a threatening manner”.

This latest story, picked up by PinkNews, the Montreal Gazette, Leeds Student Org among others portrays a tale of discrimination and persecution against a male by those awful irrational and hateful bullies: women. Stupid, bigoted rape-avoiding women who trust their own instincts of self-preservation.

From PinkNews : “A trans woman student at Leeds University was verbally abused and pushed out of the Student Union’s female toilets by two girls. “

Wow. So a grown person was attacked by two female children? Nope. The adult (“woman”) in this case is a 21 year old man and the “girls” are females also of adult age.

More from Pink News : “According to reports, Alexis, a Microbiology student who was transitioning from male to female, was shouted at and shoved in the chest by two girls, during a night called Fruity.

She said: “I’m very angry at those girls. I know better than anyone that I don’t look like a girl yet. Misgendering me is something I expect, but grabbing my breasts and shoving me is completely unacceptable. It’s wrong for a natural-born girl to insult a trans girl, especially one who prefers to dress more masculine, simply because she likes to. We’re doing the best we can – you’re lucky to have been born that way, and we can dress however we please, just like you”, Alexis added.”

Golly. This is an angry man. He commented on the Pink News site stating that he is “out” to everyone as being trans and that the women he frightened are “bitches” :

Alexis/Doug

.

Doug/Alexis

Alexis Lilith Starr aka Protoman2050 aka Douglas Pereira is a 21 year old man from Long Beach, CA whose “gender identity” is that of a man, who “loves” his dick and has no intention of “passing” (in the lingo of transactivists) as the other sex. As some transgender males do, he describes his penis as a “Click” (an amalgomation of “clit” and “dick”) and signs all his comments with the following statement “I’m more of a man than you will ever be, more of a woman than you can handle, and my damn click will break your jaw”.

Douglas started taking estrogen pills in November. As of last month he bemoaned the lack of any apparent physical changes to his 6’1″ male frame. Among his many recent public posts, many to psychology sites inquiring if he may have a sociopathic disorder due to his lack of empathy and ethics, he has expressed his desire to become a “shemale” escort after completing his Phd.

Doug/Alexis with Laydee Wig

Doug says:

“Probably by the end of this, I’ll end up pretty much as a “chick with a dick who isn’t a chick”. Thin yet toned, small breasts (that can easily be bound when the situation requires it) androgynous dress, yet be legally and, for the most part, socially male.”

and

“Who said I wanted SRS? I’m actually an androgyne (mentally both male and female, yet also neither), and I’m adjusting my body type to make that known. I love my penis too! Can’t imagine not being able to pee standing up. So yeah, I’m going to become an “it”.

So, dude is a dude that is doing some body mods to get his freak on. The whole “I’m a tragic fellow who’s a lady born in a male body who will kill myself unless you enable me medically and surgically and socially to cosmetically appear female in which case I will be a well-adjusted guy instead of (insert threat) is total crap. This is a dude that wants some body mods. The whole “female in a male’s body” trope that worked 50 years ago doesn’t apply any more. These dudes are in no way female. They never were.

I’m going to go right out on a limb here, and flat out state that NO WOMAN EVER wants to change her tampon in a room with a guy whose most important statement about himself is that his beloved penis is a weapon that can fracture bones.

Is that “transphobic”? Who gives a crap. Seriously.

There was another story this week posted by The Advocate from a man complaining about the self-preservation instinct of women against the epidemic of male rape and assault. In this story- sponsored by an LGBT news outlet – a man named Riki Wilchins complains about and mocks women for trying to protect themselves against an epidemic of male rape and violence so pervasive that we call it culture. As in rape culture. He opines at length that women who become alarmed at creepy men like himself and Doug in female restrooms are “crazy”.

Wilchens is known as the organizer of the largest transgender activist project in the history of the transgender movement.

What project would that be?

What brought more trans activists together than any other cause?

The fight for equal rights in employment, housing, freedom from male violence?

No. Reflective of the core of trans activism (whose most crucial goal is the abolishment of female rights of assembly and political organizing to protect women against male rape and violence) the largest most populous cause in the entire history of the transgender movement is “Camp Trans”- designed to harass a small annual private women’s music festival (Michigan Women’s Music Festival) and protest female rights of assembly. Wichen’s entire activist life has been devoted to eliminating the rights of females to assemble and organize in the United States. And the male powers that be- a government overwhelmingly- over 80% male! – have given him a legal marker “female” to assist him.

Wilchins: a dude

Riki’s bathroom story sponsored by the Advocate bemoans stupid rape-avoidant women who react to him, a male who presents as a male- the same way they would react to any male aggressively injecting himself into spaces sex-segregated for female safety. His tale of whoa ends with an anecdote where even he was taken aback once by another man who entered the women’s bathroom and pulled down, then removed his pants exhibition-style in the middle of the room. But wait! The man then pulled a dress out of his bag! So he was really a lady! Inside his own mind and stuff! So this dick-waving rape-tastic man in a female space was OKAYYYY. Because: dresses!

Wilchens describes his experiences frightening women as a male-appearing man who now uses the women’s room just for fun:

“I never had to worry about all this because for a long time after I transitioned, I worked hard at presenting as feminine a face as possible.

I say “worked,” because if you’re born into a boy body, then suddenly trying to make it appear reasonably female in your mid-30s is no walk in the park. While I fooled no one, I at least achieved a degree of tolerance from almost everyone.

I could saunter confidently into any restroom that had that outline of a little woman, standing primly in her A-line skirt with her hands at her sides and feet together — you know, the way cisgender women often stand in front of public elevators — and know that if I wasn’t her sister, at least all my effort had purchased another Day Pass to FemaleLand. I drew stares, but not blood.

But gradually that effort evaporated. Strip the long hair, earrings, lipstick, mascara, and blush off most cisgender women and you still usually pretty much see a woman. Strip them off me and what you see is … Richard. And no matter how feminine I feel inside, Richard gets no Day Pass. Richard sauntering confidently into the women’s room is … chaos.”

All but three states in the US – all governed overwhelmingly by males for male interests- allow men like Riki to change their legal sex marker (sometimes with various caveats- cosmetic medicalization for example) to allow men like Riki to better lobby against the rights of females to assemble and organize against male rape and violence. In the UK and some states in the US a man’s simple say-so allows him to act as an agent against the female right to organize and assemble. The primary goal of the transgender movement is elimination of scant female rights to assemble and organize away from males in countries where those rights have been enabled. In the UK all female rights of assembly away from males have already been removed.

What possible reason does a man like Doug or a man like Riki/Richard have to use the female facility? What right to infringe on the rights of females to assemble and organize and be protected -at least nominally- from male encroachment? Even if one believes the myth (absent all evidence) that men are at risk using the men’s facility when they believe themselves in their minds to be women or sport women’s clothes, neither of these men are distinct from any other man to any objective person by any measure. Nor do they claim to be. These men are male, are perceived as, and treated as the males they are every moment of every day. These males face no discrimination whatsoever using the male facilities. They are males, who appear male. They make no claim otherwise. They themselves admit that there is no reason whatsoever, no fear of discrimination or harm whatsoever in using the male facilities allotted for males.

These are the heros of the transgender movement whose sole purpose, whose primary “right” is to prevent women from acting out of common-sense self-preservation against males who behave in ways which indicate that they are predators.

Support women against rape. Support women against rape and violence that is so epidemic and accepted that we call it culture. Do so by protesting the trans-politic whose goal is to criminalize normal female common-sense measures of self-preservation against men whose greatest self-proclaimed attribute is the ability of their rape-sticks to fracture bones. Repeal public policies that enable men to criminalize female self-defense. Repeal policies that allow dudes to render female self-preservation illegal. Repeal legal change of sex designed to remove basic civil rights of women to congregate. Legalize the rights of females to defend ourselves.

84 Responses to ““Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University””

“Are all males (including the transgender variety) violent rapists? No. Of course not. But a shockingly high percentage of males are, and females (those of us who have survived so far) are very well aware of this objective fact every waking moment of our lives.”

that’s very true. I hate when people try to deny something like that that may be true of a majority because they don’t fit into that.

““Women acted with self-preservation against male who behaved in a threatening manner”.”
I can understand why they wouldn’t want a male in the bathroom with them and kicking him out, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he did anything threatening.

Dare I say… I am starting to like this website? It feeds into a reflection of lived experience as a woman, and hardens me against all kinds of misogyny.

Mostly by forcing recollections, good and bad: The concern and support shown by and for my sisters and I as we gave each other rides to our cars or our homes, making sure none of us were left standing under a dim light and exposed to the dangers of the night. The caution in leaving my drink at the (being drugged), going out[side] alone (being followed) and being sexually assaulted and raped.

Of being ejected from the men’s toilets.

Of never being ejected from the women’s toilets.

Of the one time another woman ever had a problem with me being in the ladies’ room. How she threatened to assault me, how I calmly presented my Female ID and informed her of the illegality of Females being in the men’s room. How she then managed to successfully utilize the stall despite my presence in line among her apologetic and understanding friends. How she later approached the bar and called me “the ugliest bitch she’d ever seen.” How I replied “Okay…” (at a loss for words). How my cisgender friend, Lacey, cut me off (as I moved to apologize to this woman for her own prejudices). How Lacey began lecturing on “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for everyone” in my defense. How this woman backed off… only to move about the bar, pointing and whispering about me (mostly to people who already know me). How by then I began to get upset, but understood the game she was playing, and moved to tell my cis friends about her before she got to them. How some of my friends responded.

-“Fuck her!”
-“Oh, no she didn’t! I’ll slap a bitch!”
-“She better not come at me…”

Of course, my goal was to stifle an attack on my reputation, not to incite violence against her. So I approached her friends and cautioned them that: “Although I’m a pacifist, my friends aren’t. A lot of people around here love and accept me, and your friend is really pissing some of them off.”

I don’t know what happened right after that, but I imagine she and her friends had a talk and decided enough was enough, because she later approached me, gave me a hug, and apologized even as another friend of mine, Brennan, turned and said “Hey, FUCK YOU.” I ignored that, embraced her, and apologized in return. I explained how I meant her no harm, and answered a few questions for her. It turns out her little sister came out as a Lesbian (a little on the butch side) a few days prior, and she was having a hard time accepting her. This cut her tolerance for all things LGBT, and I was just an initial outlet for her homophobia.

I like to think I directly helped her and her sister that night, by bearing her fears and hatred, and helping her deal with them. That being said, I expect this to be censored by mid-morning, because GenderTrender. Nevertheless, reflection and writing are therapeutic. I’ll keep this inspired recollection for myself, and if anyone else finds value in it, then they’re welcome to it.

@Gallus- Unfortunately for you, none of us (her, I, her friends, my friends) see it that way. All the same, kudos to you, sir, for leaving up a narrative that runs so obviously counter to your pet project.

@Toni- Guess what freak. As a butch dyke who has unfortunately startled women in rest rooms more times than I could possibly count, your behavior appalls and disgusts me sir. You are a truly disgusting human being who should be locked up the next time you threaten women with violence.

Sorry, but my AKA was “Anthony” or “Tony” and, to the best of my knowledge, no man or woman has seen my genitalia beyond a relationship setting. Lacey, like most women, doesn’t see me (or us, en masse) as a Fetishist(s).

I’m a [singular] pacifist. And I saved a [singular] women from herself and others. As for threatening women [plural], I believe GallusMag and others, looking like men and/or being attracted to women do it better and more often. So… yeah…

[Whenever I log on and see 18 comments when I haven’t posted in a long time, I know it’s some huge asshole M2T spraying his piss all over my blog. I’m gonna do you a huge favor asshole. Rather than delete delete delete I’m gonna compile all your piss in one longgggg stream of piss right here. Okay bro? Also, you do not have a cervix you creep. -GM]

I find this deeply upsetting. As another transwoman said, she expects her words to be disappeared by mid-morning as I too, but I’m hoping not. Because I think it’s really important to consider that Transwomen may or may not be women (depending on your definition), but they most certainly aren’t men. And many are staunch and active feminists who’ve made a real difference. Consider that there are miles of intersex space between male and female, and that in the Patriarchal sex/gender binary, there is only male and not male. That trans and intersexed people have been relegated to female/woman spaces because we don’t even rate our own sex/gender. This is an unfair imposition on females, and trans people should be far more considerate, compassionate, understanding. Sadly being human, and persecuted up to and including death, we tend as a visible community (as opposed to the invisible one) to be defensive, and many socialized in this aggressive society respond with varying degrees of verbal hostility… not helping their own cause, and disenfranchising the very people with whom they should be building consensus.

Trans means to cross, and in fact once across the gender divide most transpeople simply disappear into their respective communities (you only see the ones who never pass, the majority blend in perfectly). Because they are no longer visible. A point of information ,male perversions couldn’t survive gender reassignment. Male sexual behavior vanishes under the influence of estrogens. Women are safe in the presence of true tranwomen (and I’ll even acknowledge there are a few people not seeing therapists, self medicating and with clusters of mental disorders that may claim to be trans who are most certainly not…) The person above with the fish should be more considerate for now and use the unisex restroom in the Teacher’s lounge… (s)he would make a female T-Rex uncomfortable.

I am no friend of Patriarchal society. I’ve been beaten, sexually assaulted, had to jump out of a moving car to avoid rape, been chased through a public park by a high school football team, and been strung up in a garage and had my breast burned by a hot team iron (I bore the scar for nearly a decade and a half.) My nose was broken twice, my left eardrum punctured and I got a cracked rib from someone throwing a brick at me. I’ve always been terribly androgynous, resulting in that long list of assaults. I’ve been mistaken for female many times during my adolescence and adulthood (before transition.) I was at dinner with my partner, her Mother and one of her Mother’s girl friends. A drunk walked up to us, start playing with my hair (I’m half Asian and it was black and very long… to my waist) I was mortified. Still, I never even considered using a women’s restroom until I was taken into custody (I didn’t know there were actual laws you could arrest a woman for) for using a Men’s room. It’s not like I was some drag queen either, I was wearing sweats and a hoodie at the time. I just couldn’t pass as male any more. I completely understand the discomfort of having someone in the space with the wrong dangly bits. I would plotz today if a man came into a restroom I was using. I do get it (and as much compassion as I have for the trans community), if I saw a transitioning transperson disrespecting female space I’d dress her down so hard and fast she’d have to cope with near whiplash.

I’ve been an active member of the Lesbian community for nearly 20 years, and in relationship with my partner of 35 years who just passed away last September. I’ve been to many women spaces openly and lovingly included, moved and celebrating my sisters. I’ve chosen to not go to women spaces where I’m not welcome not because I couldn’t go stealth, but because I’ve thrown myself body and soul at protecting women and women spaces and if that means protecting them even from me, then I’m good with that. I was a member of the Lesbian Avengers for way over a year and there are still a number of women in California for whom I would gladly lay down my life to protect and I know they would do the same for me.

There are so many trans distinctions and gender spaces opening up, and I wish y’all could see that nothing threatens the Patriarchy more than gender anarchy. Because when male/man/hetero becomes just one of the 31 Baskin and Robbins flavors of sex, gender and preference, then it loses all it’s power. It become inherently moot. Just another so what, on a huge spectrum of what’s so.

i will soon hit the point in my life where i have lived more years with female genitals than not. I’m not a man. A man can’t get cervical cancer and there’s not a man alive who can tell why it’s good to have an OB/GYN who warms her speculum (or the unpleasant pinch of a Pap smear) A man doesn’t get a regular mammogram. A man seldom has concern about osteoporosis, and never menopause, or yeast infections or chlamydia. I haven’t even gotten to the social issues. I have or have had to deal with all these things. Getting groped on a crowded elevator, propositioned on the street, change to the other side of the street I’m walking on as a man approaches because its late and dark and I’m alone. Does any of this resonate. I and people like me are not the enemy. I didn’t do any of this to promote Patriarchal anything. Screw the Patriarchy… somebody for the love of Jebus please screw the Patriarchy and make it go away… I would love to live long enough to see people everywhere treated with respect and love and true equality.

Please cut the transpeople some slack, even if they’re rude and childish (because most of them are in the middle of puberty 2 the revenge and it makes them rude and childish… what were you like at 13?) they aren’t invading your space, they’re trying to survive Patriarchal oppression, just like y’all and you all have so much more in common than different. If you find their behavior inappropriate, instead of calling them men, yank them up short and sit them down hard. Explain to them that they had better get the 411 on dealing with women space appropriately or prepare themselves for a hard day with no end in sight. Y’all are the adults here. Really. You have all the power, which if nothing else should prove beyond a shadow of a doubt these kids don’t represent any part of the Patriarchy. This is a time when we should be building consensus and collaboration. Don’t let the those in power use us against one another. If you truly find transpeople in your restrooms offensive, then talk to them and together you can lobby for a third bathroom… male, female, other, its what I did at work for the first 6 months and it worked perfectly. By the way, where I transitioned, my work place, the women invited me to use their restroom and shower room. I would never have considered baring into that space..

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You don’t make a personal point by terrorizing a bunch of girls. That’s rude, unthinking, inconsiderate and leaves the community of women who should be our closest friends traumatized and afraid. Letting someone clearly presenting as male into a women’s restroom is simply setting the stage for explosions of misunderstandings, vitriol, recriminations and slung insults.

Please show a little consideration. If it’s about some weird personal validation, then by all means, let the women in the school inform you when its okay with them… i.e. when its so clear that you are “NOT A MAN”, that there is nothing left to be concerned with. This is the community you are supposedly transitioning into, I would treat it with a little respect FYI.

I don’t know what your raising was like and whether or not you had a powerful experience of male privilege growing up (some trans people did, and it make transition hard, because they have to get used to that going away… tough, you knew the job was dangerous when you took it

You want to park that stuff at the door because it doesn’t fly here. Get with the program.
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So I refer to myself as a transwoman here because I have a herstory. That said, I haven’t been involved in any kind of transactivism in way over 10 years and I’ve been quietly living out my live as a woman for most of 20 years now. I feel though that even so, there are important aspects of my life that are unique to me, and though every response in my life has been consistent with a feminine gender identity, I was forcibly socialize male by folks like my Father (I would say more than anything else the mark on me was mostly just trauma.)

I have worked very hard to promote women’s issues and protect women safe spaces. That includes spaces where being out would exclude me. Women being safe is infinitely more important than my personal feelings.

I want to say this is one more way the Patriachy ghettoizes women by relegating all “Non-Men” to women space, disenfranchising and therefore dehumanizing women and TG people alike. Other cultures, have created a third sex as a gender/sex catchall, like the Fafafini of Polynesia. This protects women’s autonomy, while giving TG (and I’m using TG as a blanket term for all flavors of gender variant people) a safe place to be and relate socially.

TS people, I don’t know, that’s something a little different, because in the end they’re gender invariant. Presenting and in most case blending into their respective societies seamlessly. I think its important to be out and honest, being forthright ensures there are no misunderstandings. That said, I would be extremely uncomfortable to be excluded from all women spaces. I identify as a woman, am accepted socially in many, many circles and contexts including sacred women spaces as a woman and even a shaman. To be denied access because of fear that I was in some way ever a man would be devastating to me, particularly because I would be inclined to accept the requirement of the community above my own needs because I consider safe women space so critically important.

I love that gender/sex freedom is blossoming, but it demands that society respect women safe space and begin create safe trans space distinctly there to support a third sex/gender.
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Between Middle School and High School I took karate in southern California. It was a coed class, and one of the students was this 13 year old girl, She was so bright and beautiful and she had been learning martial arts since she was 8. Well late that summer, she was walking through a park in a not so great part of town (not too far from the Compton border) and a great big guy jumped out from behind a tree. Normally I’m not big on violent response. There’s almost always a better way to address a situation.

But a full grown man grabbing a 13 year old girl…. He hit her trying to subdue her and she proceeded to break every bone in his right arm… literally rendered permanently dead meat. It two other people to pull her off of him and he was doing all the screaming.

I think training girls to protect themselves should be a mandatory scholastic prerequisite with the added bonus of being able to instantly tell all the perverts by their stumps and missing fingers. Its sad we have to even think like this, but I don’t see another solution in sight without putting shock collars on the male of the species.
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Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 12:21 pm | In reply to BadDyke.
What the H*ll is that anyway! Have an 18 year old guy in the house I rent a room in, and he has about 20 friends and they piss all over everything… I go out to the back yard to picj fruit and it smell like we have goats… I’m considering having my nose hot glued shut!
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airy, I get your upset. but I’m telling you, to move your head two steps to the right and get their upset. All they’re asking for is a safe place to perform their personal business without having to freak out because someone’s sexual politics is seen by the school administration as more important than their sanity or peace of mind. If that guy would have come into my restroom I’d have freaked too.

These women need, deserve, MUST HAVE a set of spaces free of antagonism, abuse, sexual misconduct and threat of male violence. Are you going to support them in getting what they need, or are you going to be one more irritation inflicted on people who are already irritated to the point carving ther initials in something.. please remember you are at this moment typing into their space and if you use it like a toilet you can’t be surprised if they flush you.

Just as aside, supporting them in being respected sets the precedent for you to be respected as well… you know, be the change you want to see… want respect, be respectful
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Sadly its a mark of the breed.

Trying not to get killed, the least socially offensive social role these people can usually pull off is GEEK, Sophistication isn’t their strong suit and testosterone poisoning bloody awful.So they GEEK hard. Hoping nobody will notice them. So once they start to transition… Pompous Git… its a occupational hazard. Self righteous Barking Trans is one of the other common beasties.

It takes a lot of soul searching and even more work detoxing from testosterone to discover you have emotions, you can share them, and they’re actually the best part of you. A couple more years writing something other than program code, and who knows you might even be able to communicate. Who’d-a-thunk it.
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You know they say opinions are like assholes… and here we have assholes with opinions… so now the whole asshole-opinion circle is complete.

Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 6:38 pm | In reply to Marie-France Lesage.
Marie – I assert every human being is a personal work of art, a “SELF” creation. Most people never take any responsibility for what they become, what they inherit from family and society, what they choose to believe. But those of us that do, we are extraordinary, because our lives, down to every fiber are focused on to a resonating theme. Our lives become part of a whole, it has and arc.

It took me years, exposing my soul, sharing my every thought and feeling and experience in a community of people I deeply loved all women. To arrive at the shore of the self I could call my home. To know that I had a common language and a rich body of common experiences that I could relate to. I know why breasts are important up to and including nursing a baby (when my sister couldn’t.) I know that hollow ache four inches below my navel and three inches back. I know about the magic momma reflexes that men simply can’t understand that are so fast and amazing that you’re catching the falling glass before it falls. Or the night sweats of menopause. Or the aching breasts of cycling hormones on a 28 day cycle.

So no. I am not female and never can be. But in the dozen or more women’s communities in which I participate and contribute, I am known and loved and cherished as a woman and its taken me 20 years to earn the right to bury sisters, raise up daughters, feed babies and fight for the dignity of all women. If the only way I could prove the love of my woman’s heart was to hoist it up and place it on a pike for all to see, I would do it and proudly.

Perhaps this is insanity. All I can tell you is that I have never in my entire life for a single moment understood what motivates the male mind. I have at no time in my entire life had a friend who was male, that I wasn’t both a least a bit frightened and confused. If I have ever know a moment of male privilege it must have come and gone in my sleep, but I can recount endless atrocities committed against me by boys and men. I am very lucky to be here, I could have been killed half a dozen times. If I’m not a woman, I’m a pretty damn good facsimile.

Oh, and I’m clear I haven’t proven myself in this space, I have no expectations, I make nobody wrong, I demand nothing and I love for simply being and making the sad old world a better place… so if that sounds manly then I’m a man.

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Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 6:11 pm | In reply to womenofthepatriarchy.
DUH! sex matters… transwomen can’t get pregnant… this is not rocket science… A transwoman has nothing to contribute to the reproductivertights issues, save that whatever the community says they need, we should be lining up 5 abreast and 20 deep to support’em. And if not, I want to know why the hell not and I want to know NOW!

TransWomen are Trying to Silence Me : PLEASE ASSIST

Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 6:03 pm | In reply to Marie-France Lesage.
I’m a transwoman, and the first thing I would say is that I would be happy, no thrilled, to put this video up on my website. This young woman is eloquent, makes critically important distinctions and speaks her piece with incredible courage, dignity and grace.

I apologize. I have been completely out of touch with the Trans community in any way shape or form for over ten years now, and its clear the wheels have come off the cart and I’m now thinking the problem is lack of proper direction and leadership, and for that I am deeply ashamed.

I don’t identify as trans (and haven’t for a very long time). I do identify as lesbian, and have been an active member in my community for most of 20 years (and its a very active community…) I have fought long and hard for safe women space and seeing it threatened this way makes me physically ill. Worst of all by the very people who should know better.

I understand what’s happening. These are emotionally young people early in transition, raw, desperate for acceptance and validation. They haven’t gone far enough, been purged of testosterone long enough, present to estrogen long enough to have that aggressive feisty edge knocked off. So they think the can force an outcome and all they’ll force is real hatred.

The distinction presented is clear and obvious. I have a cervix, so I need to have pap smears. I am trans and post menopausal, so I have no uterus or ovaries. I have no reproductive issues. There actually is some PIV overlap particularly around STDs. I’ve been told my vagina is very nice and I know I like it very much, and would prefer foreign object (like men’s penises) not of my choosing remain outside the vagina, and by extension out of women safe space.

I see no problem with this message being conveyed and don’t see how anyone could logically take this as Transphobic. More over she makes a perfect excellent argument for safe space for females only seeing as there are clearly issues over which I have no common ground. Wanna talk rape, I have common ground (and the scars to prove it.) You want to talk about miscarriage, I’m so sorry baby, I love you and I want to heal your hurt, but I don’t know that one. Contrary to some who assert that there is no such thing as transphobia, I would assert that men are killing of T-people by the score so, I think its fair to say yes Virginia, there is transphobia. I would further assert that TGs and other genderqueer people with fully operating penises might well stimulate phallophobia, particularly in women’s safe space… and to be perfectly clear when I’m in women safe space I’m not too excited by the idea of a lose penis running around… sort of messes up the whole point of a safe space. A wise woman once described it to me the most perfect crystal flute, filled with the most exquisite champagne, and at the bottom of the glass is a bunny turd… and no matter how you try to sip around it, it sort of messes up the flavor of the whole glass. One penis messes up the entire safe space… sorry!

Please believe me when I say for the most part, this isn’t about Patriarchy… its about stupid. Stupid, self involved and more stupid. (Throwing hands up!!!) Clearly I can’t apologize enough for this community. I’ll go root around over where the transfolk are and see if I can’t spank some of these chillen into behaving like grownups.

I think maybe it time for women with a couple decades of life under their belt to come back for a short visit and square this community once again. I don’t want to intrude but someone needs to let this beautiful young women know there are trans women who get her message, honor it and her and her right to share this important conversation,

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Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 4:29 pm | In reply to womenofthepatriarchy.
I won’t argue there are the Betty Crockers… but so much of this bull is trying to get past a male dominated medical system demanding that we pass some kind of heterocentric, barbie mill process with facial surgery, breast implants, ass augmentation, blah, blah, blah. Screw them.

I didn’t go for any of it and there was pressure to comply. In the end, all I did was estrogen and finally vaginaplasty. That’s all I needed, that all I wanted and life has been sweet ever since. As I finally became me, my sweetie transitioned to lesbian life (we’d always been honest with each other and I think she chose me to begin with because she was Bi.) I stopped the estrogen almost 10 years ago and went through early onset menopause. I wouldn’t change a second of it.

The rest as they say was herstory. Toni came down with ovarian cancer last August and passed away in September, and there’s a hole in my heart you can drive three lanes of traffic through. I built me, stick by stick and stone by stone. I am my own work of art and no clinic, or male authority, or sporting a penis determined where my life was going to go or how I was going to get there. I am my own masterwork

Oh and anyone not prepared to catch a little heat for this choice is just bug-fuck. If I’m not pissing off someone somewhere, I’m just not playing hard enough. But you wimmin, I’m not here to grieve you and I’ll honor your choices. Say “No” all you want. I’m good with it.

“Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University”

Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 3:51 pm | In reply to BadDyke.
Been there, done that, got the ticket…

I’ve always been physically androgynous, in fact I’ve been mistaken for female many times in my life before transition. I reacted to estrogen within 3 days, and by my third month I sprouted a perky set of baby boobs and stopped passing as male. However, I wasn’t out yet as trans so I just kept trying to do business as usual. I tried wear super tight T-shirts under sweat shirts, but the whole body was changing and there was no way to hide even under my baggiest clothes. Was feeling really uncomfortable using the Men’s Room so I waited till everyone was out and ran into a stall. Wearing sweats and a hoodie, I figured nobody would notice. Sat down, did my thing,flipped my hood up, kept looking down and hoped I’d get out without any trouble.

Wrong! Walking out I ran smack dab into a security guard.

He tells me to stop, I give him my deepest “Huh?”, he tells me its against the law in California for a woman to use the men’s restroom, and that I could be sited on a number of grounds and that he’s taking me to the security office until the police have been notified and “My disposition” was determined. This wouldn’t the last time I had problems with security guards (did an action at a warehouse with the Lesbian Avengers for firing a friend when they found out she was a lesbian… Christian Company, managed by serious assholes… anyway)

The police arrive. and begin questioning me, I ask if they have a female officer, and they bring one in. Hey if I’m going to jail, I refuse to talk with the guys they sent. Anyway, I explain to her what happened and she begins laughing hysterically… I can’t help myself I start laughing to… the guys don’t have a clue. She tell them it was an honest mistake and to give me a citation for unauthorized trespass (which beats some of the other things they could have slapped me with.) I get a wrist slap and life to pee another day.

Sorry about all the transbabies. All they want is to be accepted and they haven’t been weaned off testosterone long enough to know that you can only earn acceptance, not take it. Hope my presence hasn’t been disruptive, I thought when I saw all the kids running around I might be able to keep them in check, fat chance. That’s kids for you. All you wimminz have a great day. Ta

“Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University”

Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 2:23 pm | In reply to pikuthulu.
I was 16, going to work at my Mother’s nut and candy store.

I was an idiot, figured I get there faster if I hitch hiked. A guy pulled over, and me in. First he put his hand on my thigh. I moved over… so did his hand. Then he reached for me and told me how pretty I was. I think I almost peed on his seat. I tried pushing him away, but he was more than twice my size. He grabbed my hair and as he slowed down at the light,

I jumped out of the car while it was moving. I got to work, bruised and bloody, and all I could think of was how lucky I was and how close I probably came to ending up in a landfill somewhere.

Its been 40 years and it still makes me shake.

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Submitted on 2013/02/18 at 1:52 pm | In reply to Alexis Starr.
Alexis, just for you benefit I’m going to do this by the numbers;
1. I’m presuming everyone here is above the age of consent, so the only girls in the house…. sorry I don’t see any… chalk one up for condescending.
2. They are simply letting know men are as men do, and you’re doing it right now.
3. The next sentence is the spewing of an emotional 3 year old (and I think I’ve just insulted three year olds) They could have made themselves any clearer. You have no privilege here, stop acting like you do.
4. Why do they hate men… war, rape, slavery, genocide, is this clicking or do I have to go on… objectification, sexual assault, male privilege… other than that guys are awesome.
5. No but that’s like saying I only have to worry about one lion on the Serengeti… the one that eats me… I should now feel cozy?
6. You only see a therapist if the problem is in your head… I promise you, all the therapy in the world won’t make stepping out onto a busy highway turn out any better….

Sorry Wimminz the transbabies are so young and they just don’t get it. I’d put them over my knee if I thought it would help, but what they really need to do is walk about a thousand miles in your shoes. Alexis… say you’re sorry. Then go home until you can play nice. I clean up the pee on the floor, ucckk it stinks. shooo! go home.
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Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 11:31 am
I don’t disrespect other people’s blog spaces, please delete all my posts as you see fit.

Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 11:29 am | In reply to Anne Marie Tobias.
[GM] I’m here by request, and I don’t piss on other people’s space. My only reason for being here was to pull unruly transfolk up short and attempt to minimize any damage. Along that vein, please purge all my content as you see fit. I have no interest in wasting a millimeter of your page space when it could be better used by the women here.

I saw the video you just posted. You have sympathetic ears in the Trans-community, people who will happily go out of their way to help you restore and expand what your community has lost. I may not be female but I am no man, I do not inflict myself on innocent bystanders and I don’t invade places I’m not welcome I know we’ve been almost silent, you know how hard it is for women to be heard in a room full of boisterous guys.
but you have sympathetic ears and minds over there, you should capitalize on that. So delete my words.

Thank you so much.

“Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University”

Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 11:15 am
[GM] Coming here was not my idea. I’m only here to deal with the transfolks getting out of hand. I have no interest in even appearing on your blog, I only wanted to pull unruly children up short. I don’t “piss” on other people’s space and I’m requesting you purge my comments. I have zero ego on this. I may not be a female but please stop calling me a man. I don’t victimize people, and I don’t disrespect people and their spaces.

Its your blog use any of my words as you see fit, and purge the rest (or all at your discretion) I am only looking to support you and find ways to get the gender community to address its clear responsibility to the larger community, particularly safe space for women, including female only safe space for women. I completely advocate third sex/gender spaces (like the Fafafini of Polynesia) so that females have safe space. Use me as a resource, you have access to the gender community and people who are sympathetic to your community’s needs…. look at this video, we have common ground. Please, lets take back what you’ve lost and fortify it so you never lose it again. The majority of trans are not hetero-gender fetishists, and if you haven’t heard us, you should be able to recognize what happens to female expression in the louder more boisterous expression of men, we get drowned out.

Let us do what women do best, achieve consensus, draw strength from one another and find common ground upon which to build. Thank you so much.
———————

Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 6:51 am | In reply to Anne Marie Tobias.
[GM] Please blow my words away.. this is your space and I only came to keep the rude ones in check…. make it all go away, Or save what you want… but this is no ego trip and I’m no man.

“Trans Woman student Abused and Shoved out of toilets at Leeds University”
Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 6:24 am | In reply to Anne Marie Tobias.
Actually, no delete it all. including this I didn’t come here to “piss”, in fact I clean up my own messes like any responsible adult person. I get no “ego” boost getting my words on you. In fact watching these children behave this way is leaving me with just a hint of vomit backing up in my throat.

I came here to address what I thought was grotesquely misdirected anger on the part of transfolk at women for whom we need to cut a wide berth. Coming here wasn’t my idea, a nontrans lesbian girlfriend asked me to spank some misbehaving children. I can do that completely away from here, it won’t be your problem. I am not your problem. I am not a misogynistic, narcissistic, raging ass hat. I’m clearly not one of these autogynephylic fetishists. You may not accept me as a woman, or a female or even a three toed blue billed whatever, absolutely your prerogative and I applaud your right.

However, I ain’t no man, and I have a long list list of girlfriends who’ve known me since I was a kid (40 – 50 years) men don’t bond that way… especially not with wimmin, you know that right? They’ll be happy to describe the person I was growing… let’s just say whenever I got a ride to school I gave my Daddy a kiss bye when I got out, all the way through High School.

I want you to delete this because its your space, but I want you to understand there are more than fetishistic men in this community. We’re not as visible for the same reason women have a hard time being visible in a room full of loud and rambunctious men. But we’re here. We’re the healers. The peace makers. The nurturers. The ones who bring love and celebrate life. We also clean up the messes and take responsibility for things and if any of that sounds like men to you, then please introduce me, I haven’t met those men yet.

Oh, and I do have a cervix… really, my GYN almost shit herself when she did my first pelvic (wanted to know what was on the other side)… I absolutely can get, and die from cervical cancer and I do get Pap Smears on a regular basis… yes, I’ve had that experience too.

Okay, blow it all away… please know that all transwomen aren’t like these angry children. So many of us lead good happy lives giving to our families and our communities. We aren’t all selfish snots
————————–
Submitted on 2013/02/19 at 10:57 pm | In reply to Anne Marie Tobias.
Coming here wasn’t my idea. A close lesbian friend requested that I step up and take responsibility for getting some unruly transfolk out of your safe space. I don’t pee on other people’s spaces, I’m responsible for myself and clean up my messes. Its why I’ve had brief exchanges with several RadFems that were mutually respectful, supportive, deeply moving and compassionate.

To that end, I’m requesting [GM] remove all my comments… keep any you want, its your space, and I wouldn’t presume to tell you what to do, but I don’t feel like leaving even a trace of me here… I don’t get any “ego boost” here, Why would I, I can go to a real women’s safe space in the phhysical world any time i want, and they honor me there.

I’m not a man, Even when I’m disciplining unruly children. I’m loving and respectful… does that sound like any men you know? (sigh) I had a penis, and it was like a little coffin, killing me an inch and a minute at a time, waiting till the day they’d buried me in the damn thing and I cut it out of my life and I’ve been free ever since… and I’m perfectly good not being a female (though I ache at not being able to give birth, I’m soon going to be holding premature babies to help them grow and thrive, and grow up to be loved, healthy and happy.) Call me an IT if it makes you feel better, but don’t call me a man, you don’t know my mind, or my heart, and the presumptions is cruel, ill informed and bigoted. Please, be better than the men you despise, or then what is it you struggle for, are you just looking to be the new men, taking their place? I hope not. In fact I refuse to believe that.

Those colored trans pie charts… read the data, the majority of trans people (between half and two thirds), aren’t hetero autogynephilic fetishists (in a weird symmetry slightly more than half are genuinely women and the rest men.) The video that went up last night of a transwoman advocating the video of that beautiful young black woman and her brave and brilliant appraisal of female and women, should be a huge beacon! You have no idea how much support you have in the trans community. How many people are at this moment ready to advocate your needs and concerns. You only hear the rabble rowsers, but that shouldn’t surprise you, how hard is it to hear the women in any mixed space, the guys are always 10x louder and more rambunctious.

I beg you to stop inciting hatred and instead build a bridges. I even add that I completely acknowledge that your need for safety supersedes my need for inclusion. We want you to get back everything you’ve lost and then get you all so much more. Its time every woman on the planet, female and not had the right to self autonomy, unbounded self determination, and complete control of her reproductive destiny. Its the only hope humanity has…

Read about the 1995 Cairo Conference, women have already solved the problems of the world and men simply won’t listen.
[GM] Please remove all my comments. Thank you, and Blessed be.
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Submitted on 2013/02/20 at 8:18 am | In reply to Anne Marie Tobias.
I came here looking for common ground and to perhaps persuade some young transfolk to ease up a bit. I don’t pee on anyone’s anything, and I not only clean up my mess, but whenever possible clean up the mess of others. Along that vein, I would actually be perfectly happy, deep down satisfied if [GM] would purge every word I’ve posted here. Because everyone that’s going to read them already has or never will, and I don’t want to waste a millimeter of blog area in your safe space. Sorry I’m so wordy. Call it being lazy, I’m just to lazy to stop.

I can go to a brick and mortar women’s safe space where I’m welcome and honored, I don’t need to impinge on your virtual one. I was going to ask you to show transpeople a little dignity, because there are so many of us who want you to have what you want… and would actively work on your behave inside and outside of our community. But that would require reaching out, and I don’t know how to earn your trust. Sorry about the loud ones. Its just as in any mixed space, below the shouting guys there are women being drowned out in the din. Perhaps its time we were more vocal.

I won’t bother you any more… sorry for the intrusion. /If you’d be so good as to make me go away? Thank you.

““Who said I wanted SRS? I’m actually an androgyne (mentally both male and female, yet also neither), and I’m adjusting my body type to make that known. I love my penis too! Can’t imagine not being able to pee standing up. So yeah, I’m going to become an “it”.”
this guy insults the androgynous stuff imo

Thank you so much for this, Gallus Mag. It is so clear: “A man entering a private women’s changeroom or lavatory is threatening behavior, Sir.” And anyone who does not understand this or does not care in their fight for men to have yet more access to terrorize and attack girls or women simply hates us and is our enemy.

(At least from a German-speaker’s view) This is a classical catch-22:
1) We have demanding ″nice guys″ (read: MRAs without the public hate-spewing, i. e. stealth MRAs) that we accept that their ″prick is no weapon″ (here, e. g., the title says exactly this: http://www.zeit.de/kultur/literatur/2012-03/ralf-boent ) because men are oh so oppressed and we need to value masculinity again. Poor little males are sad because mean women are so nasty with them!
2) Other men using their pricks as weapons by threatening and attacking women with it (like jawbreaker boy here).

This is a strategy – we must not name the weapon to not hurt precious feelings, but they still can use the weapon if they want to. They are not hurting feelings with it, after all, only women.
Great.

(I hope including the link is okay, I just came across that yesterday and find it telling)

Unfortunately, this webpage woldn’t go through google translate whole. But seems like the usual stuff.

Just noticed, says all this nicey stuff, but then in the middle (according to my translation), says: “Bönt urges the men to not to get soft”.

See, they CAN’T even spot the patriarchal overtones in their language. Soft is BAD because a soft penis isn’t such an effective weapon, yes?

And let’s list the numbers of american men who died in Vietnam (whilst having problems, as the military taught them, of distinguishing between their firearm and their shortarm), and ignore the number of women they raped (and murdered) along the way…………………

Exactly! Anyone in my country who works with elderly people knows that it is the FEMALE patients with alzheimers and dementia who are afraid in the homes and hospitals when they are touched by – too often male – “care”givers. Not the oh so traumatised male ex-soldiers, but the women who were at home (home is a relative term when bombs drop on your head) and raped by dozens of soldiers.

Men don’t want to accept that rape is a horrible thing – or that it is there at all. They want to wave it off
– as a wartime nuisance long time ago
– a mildly uncomfortable thing, as they see in movies or tv shows where the raped woman stands up, graciously forgives the rapist, shining in her humanity, and then lives on fine and dandy
– something that happens only to bad sluts as they see in porn, and what women secretly crave.

Of course they think it is okay to force their way into women’s spaces, and be it the toilet like this creep up there.

Well, when I started reading I thought you meant here, in NA, because it happens here too often, is hidden, trivialized, dismissed, shushed up. The women who as you’ve described have Alzheimer’s or some other dementia, are said to be hallucinating. This gives the rapists free reign, they know for sure now, no one is going to believe her. Scroll down for the pix of the rapist in ONE incident. This smiling pic was taken at the court house: Read what he did. Did you think maybe, you were in Afghanistan? That would be the rational thought: http://elderadvocates.ca/violence-indignities-sexual-assault-rape/

In general I support the rights of trans* bods, but increasingly I find its being used as a cover for male infiltration by people who do not actually identify as women, and also as a cover for people with mental health difficulties who are being given hormone treatment rather than councilling, and being led down a “trans” path where really their problems lie elsewhere.

There is such a thing as trans (its cross-cultural and historic) and the transphobia that comes from some quarters of the feminist movement depresses me, but at the same time, there are more and more cases of agressive transactivists demanding access to female only spaces.

In the case above, I believe that Leeds also has a non-gendered toilet in addition to sex-segregated ones, which seems like a very obvious solution – to have male, female and both/neither/any. Why the trans student didnt use this facility I really dont understand, unless (as I suspect), through a desire to “make a point”.

The night-club event at which the incident occurred has a no re-entry policy; and I believe the non-gendered toilet to be on the other side of the barrier. So Alexis/Doug would have to leave the ‘club’ and re-pay to enter.

Alternatively, he could use a bathroom for his sex. Seeing as how HE STILL HAS A PENIS.
And if he did get harrassed in the males, we would support him. He should be allowed to dress however he feels and not be harrassed in the males toilet.

As it was, he got harrassed in the ladies. Maybe this will be a wake up call to trans that women aren’t going to sit happily by as men enter their spaces.

No, you’re absolutely right. Transgender males don’t want access to females’ restrooms because male ones are too dangerous. They want access to female restrooms because it’s one more hurdle they have to overcome (like the barrier that is lesbians’ cotton panties). The goal is not to be safe, but to make sure that women have no spaces they can call their own. An overwhelming focus of what they call “transphobia” has nothing to do with any sort of violence or hate but in a refusal to defer and to allow them to appropriate women’s experiences and spaces.

I agree with this article, and I’m not a big fan of this guy at all. At first I thought you were making some of the comments up, but I did some google searches and found where she posted. So my blood began to boil.

I will admit though that I am a transgender, and identify as female. Now I’m transitioning or whatever you want to call it. I just want to point out that if I have HAVE to use the restroom I just go to the gender neutral bathrooms on campus, and the main reason is I don’t want anyone to be uncomfortable. You really need to think of others, and this jerk if I can be crass is just that. There isn’t a reason why you can’t go to a gender neutral or family restroom on campus. If you don’t have any ask the university to see if they will do something about it instead of causing a scene. There should be private restrooms though, I know my university has them that are just single room restrooms. I don’t know perhaps I lack empathy, but some of her comments are just repulsive. I am all for equal rights of people, but there are lines to be drawn. If you’re going to transition you need to understand that you’re walking a very thin line between socially acceptable behavior, and you need to understand that if you’re doing this truly for yourself have some empathy for others, and rationalize things out before you blindly just go about doing nonsense. At any rate I apologize for spamming, and adding to a discussion that I clearly lack perspective on. I mean I do believe that women who are born women should have spaces, and freedom of isolation. There isn’t a reason why this can’t be done, and I don’t understand the need perhaps gender affirmation I don’t know to infringe on these rights. If a woman is uncomfortable having a trans* person either male to female or female to male than just accept it. There is obviously a reason, and you should respect it.

Also I’m sorry for posting again I just wanted to put my two cents on this article, because it infuriated me. I definitely see where you are coming from, and if this is really the progress that is going to be made I disagree with the movement wholeheartedly. As I said before I definitely cannot speak for anyone, but myself. But I hope I haven’t upset anyone by posting here.

Ewww, malespeak…. ” I disagree with the movement wholeheartedly…”
How do men manage to sound so DRY and ARID when they write online? I agree with doublevez that this one is trying his best to sound “feminine” but he just comes across as a pompous git.

“But I hope I haven’t upset anyone by posting here.” Yep, passive-agreesive feminine bullshit. NOT something that goes down well here.

“There should be private restrooms though” Firstly, private restrooms require more resources (and you end up with fewer places to piss), whereas the MAIN concern at my university at the moment is that menz bathroom stalls+urinals FAR outnumber female stalls. Count the places to piss, and no wonder us laydees have to spend so much time bloody queuing……………..

Second point — PRIVATE restrooms would actually be LESS safe for women and children. As it stands, if you see a very obvious MALE person entering the door to the female loo (either the ones with many stalls, or the few private ones), then you can raise the alarm. If it was all private SEX-neutral loos, that makes it MUCH easier, I suspect, for a male to get a female or child into a nice, isolated room, WITH A LOCK. Getting a female into a stall in a communal loo gives the possibility of detection entering the loo in the first place, AND the fact that once in the stall, they can still be heard/partially seen. But nice, private, lockable rooms? Just what your local pervert voyeur/paedophile/rapist ordered.

Whereas from the other side, what do we have? Bathrooms have DIFFERENT plumbing based on our plumbing based on SEX. Bathrooms have different facilties (like tampon dispensers and disposal bins) based on our biology based on SEX. Add in the fact as well that male urine smells VERY different to female for many females. Add in some stats as regards number of females/children assaulted in female bathrooms by males, and safety as well as commonsense BIOLOGY say that bathrooms are best segregated for the masses in terms of SEX.

As regards restroom provision, there is a BIG difference between what people NEED (plumbing and resources based on their biology/sex, or resources based on trying to change a kids nappy, or get your wheelchair through the door), and what some people WANT, which is permission to use a bathroom that doesn’t fit their sex, or their actual biology, or their physical needs, but instead is based on some inner conviction (of jenduh) that needs external reinforcement.

Heck, but we all KNOW what would happen if the frequent calls from the student officer responsible for jenduh for neutral loos got their way — women would loose out AGAIN as the fews loo we do have were converted to a smaller number of private restrooms, and we had to put up with the constant stink of male piss, plus their unending inability to either aim, or operate a simple hinge…………………….

“I just want to point out that if I have HAVE to use the restroom I just go to the gender neutral bathrooms on campus (blah blah blah) you really need to think of others. ”

You. Are telling me. I have to think of YOU. A MALE???

Males piss all over the place, on everything, anytime, anywhere they want. You can just continue doing that. Haul out your dick and piss on the side of a tree, or someone’s car tire, or a fence, like I’m sure you’ve done thousands of times in your life. Don’t even bother hiding or trying to be discrete, because, likely, you never have before. Suddenly, you have to be have privacy while you piss.

I took it to mean he was sucking up. Oh hey, it worked. On you three anyway. If trans are going to think of “others” (whoever could you mean) then they can do it before they go around appropriating my Sex and my rights. Wassamatta you three? You want to ally trans? Euuu.

rukiabrooks says explicitly in their post that they support female-only space, and they disagree with the behavior of the so-called trans person at the heart of this story.

I’m not saying that deserves a pat on the head, but why are you attacking them? If it’s just because they’re young and nervous (at least that’s what I inferred from the wording of their comment), it’s kind of a missed opportunity. They are trying to be an ally!

Anyway, as far as this story goes, I just can’t even begin. Rikki has clearly gone insane, and the other one – yikes! We’re clearly headed for a societal peak trans moment.

Female only space includes the space FEMALE takes up in the pantheon. Not just my space in a washroom.

Males are not Females, and that’s the space I’m protecting. Sitting in a women’s studies tenured chair as the “first woman” blah, or with “female” on their driver’s license, or pushing their way into women’s shelters, or rape crisis centres, or telling me I can’t talk about my cramps, fibroids or lactation et al because TRANSPHOBIAAHHH, taking up any kind of women’s right by calling themselves women? That’s the space I’m concerned about. So should you be.

I went to Leeds university. I was molested twice in the student union. I couldn’t report it because I hadn’t seen who did it (the place was busy). I remember it very vividly.
It probably happens to a lot of other women there, but it doesn’t make the news on campus, like this does.

It was a long time ago and I’m sure I wasn’t unique. I wasn’t so much reporting it as saying that Leeds university student union has bigger fish to fry than a man being kicked out of the ladies’ toilet.

As regards universities, I agree women being molested/assaulted ISN’T NEWS because it happens too damn often. When I was at my women-only Oxford college, we had a flasher in the bike sheds, and college didn’t even TELL US. We then had someone attacked in their room. At another university, in another city, I was groped several times, in public, in main shopping areas, on a saturday afternoon. Was that news? Was it even, let’s face it, that extraordinary. Yet ONE M2T gets booted out of the ladies, and suddenly it’s NEWS.

In my case, my (male ) colleagues frankly didn’t believe me when I said how frequently I got sexist/homophobic abuse. To prove it, I made them walk 10 paces behind me on a night out. Then they finally saw how MUCH abuse I had to put up with, day after day.

That’s it, for WOMEN this isn’t news, it’s just the shit we have to wade through every damn day! But some man gets one little speck of that on his nice new dress, and suddenly we’re the ENEMY.

Sorry, obviously a big triggered by spotting today a uni poster for a Reclaim the Night event which seems to invite anyone and everyone, and only mentions violence against women in small letters, in a very muted colour. Can everyone else here rememeber when the whole damn point about Reclaim the Night was that it was WOMEN reclaiming it. Now we’ve been forced back into trying to reclaim our toilets, let alone getting out of them and going out to reclaim the whole damn night!

Oh, I used to be sexually harassed and molested quite a lot outside of university at that age. University incidents are just one piece of shit in a big bucket. It’s amazing how many women have all this happen to them and still don’t become feminists. I guess patriarchy has got ’em good. I tell people, who are supposedly my friends, what happened to me and they just shrug.There’s a nightclub I don’t like going to because every time I’m there, without fail, I get groped. They don’t give a shit because they’ve been drinking there for years and they’re not going to take my silly sex-related concerns into account.

This whole incident and the reaction to it is hard evidence that men are the privileged class in society.

Yes, doublevez, when that man posted his tedious sob story about the restroom, I was thinking, men are filthy. Where I live, many of the restrooms are for both females and males, and they are disgusting when compared to ones just for females.

Yes, they are always marking territory, whether pissing on everything and everyone, as you said, or with rape, war, or the forever marking of their nuclear weapons, waste and “accidents.”

This is a disgustingly insulting column. It is one more example of the transphobia so rife within the feminist movement. Whatever the rights or wrongs of the original incident that caused the initial article the writers obvious hatred of trans women and the struggle they have as a community is downright vile!
Posting the person’s full names and other identifying details in such a hate filled piece is arguably incitement to violence and breaks various journalistic codes of practice and indeed the PCC’s rules. I am guessing the writer is an amateur… in more ways than one!

Insulting, where, how? I thought it was a great piece and well done. Did I miss something? The point is to protect women, yet again, from males. Do you take issue with that? You do concede that men pose a physical threat to women. I think most law enforcement agrees—so to assert it is “disgusting” de facto states that you in fact are violent in your hate toward women, a misogynist,
Don’t you mean, “Shocking, this is shocking,” Off script? Ah “transphobia,” there’s the script– the cry of the wild. Cat, twanzphobic, otter, puffin, transphobic, a man with a penis dressed in a skirt—a man threatening women–uber transphobic, woman attacked, more transphobia. Crazy isn’t it?
Transphobia—merely a made up word to attempt to shame women into feeling guilty. No such word, meaningless. On the other hand dysphoria, and fetishistic cross-dressing are listed as psychiatric conditions. So how’s cross-dressphobic—does that work, schizophobic, narcissistic phobic? Let’s be accurate if only for the sake of truth as I unfortunately lack a delusion—bereft I know.
“Vile” He exclaimed, simply vile—high drama. Posting a name, a picture does not break any journalistic codes—look at a newspaper, any in the past 50 years—indeed, those are pictures and under them names. Hate? I must be missing that but keep trying. Oh hark, the exaggeration train is pulling into the station, loaded with manure– Incite violence—you mean all those attacks that women have made against men. attacking men. Amateur as opposed to what, the professional making clownish claims.
I would urge you to get over yourself because everyone else has. Accept the simple fact women are not interested in a penis with nail polish, in women’s spaces—is that so hard to understand? They are also not interested in phony claims of victimization. I understand, like the clothes the erotic charge comes from playing the victim. But really it sounds as phony as “oh take me daddy,yes,yes.” Women do not get off on being in physical danger—you might want to note that. What is disgusting is your misogyny.

You girls obviously have nothing better to do than insult transwomen. Does writing all this make you feel like a bigger person? Why, exactly, do you hate men so much? Do you seriously think all men and transwomen are out to rape you? If so, maybe you need to see a therapist.

Doug, what do you gain out of using the women’s restroom? You are a man who appears male and loves to pee while standing (with his penis!).
Could you please tell me what possible reason you have for using a women’s restroom? What do you gain from doing so- besides frightening women?

Alexis / Doug if I wasn’t so angry with you , I would pity you. You appear to have no self-awareness. Are you on the Autism spectrum? Perhaps you should work on empahty and correctly reading others emotions and feelings before embarking on the transition thing.

Cherryblossom said:
“How do men manage to sound so DRY and ARID when they write online? I agree with doublevez that this one is trying his best to sound “feminine” but he just comes across as a pompous git.”

Exactly, how do they manage to write this way all the time?
And since we have no documented cases of men attacking each other in male restrooms, or no documented cases of men attacking drag queens in men’s rooms, I think this speaks volumes. Male to Trans need to really challenge jenah norms by using the men’s room, thus challenging all men to stop attacking women. If you put on a dress, you advertise yourself as bait for male attackers and rapists, and that is what feminism seeks to end. Men need to be challenged on their own territory by males, and that includes the ones who have their bodies mutilated to “perform” femininity.

“Male to Trans need to really challenge jenah norms by using the men’s room, thus challenging all men to stop attacking women. If you put on a dress, you advertise yourself as bait for male attackers and rapists, and that is what feminism seeks to end. Men need to be challenged on their own territory by males,..”

There is a woman battered every 9 seconds, raped every minute and murdered every 15 minutes by a penis person in this country, including penis ppl in skirts claiming to be women. ALL adult penis ppl have viewed porn and at the very least, have fantasized about raping women in that X-rated movie they constantly have going on their ponrified little heads. No exceptions. How silly of women to think the penis ppl mean them harm. “Kindly disregard 6,000 years of history, k?” says the spider to the fly.

Maybe there are 3 penis ppl in Outer Mongolia who mean women no harm. So how do we tell the nice penis ppl from the ones who do mean us harm? Answer: We can’t. Any more than the penis ppl can tell which tigers are man-eating and which ones aren’t. Do the penis ppl allow tigers to roam freely in their spaces? Of course not. The penis ppl don’t take any chances which might jeopardize their safety. Not even for one second. Well guess what? The penis ppl are more dangerous to women than tigers. So why is it being demanded of women that they disregard the danger and allow the penis ppl into their spaces? When they know damn well that there are going to be casualties because of it?

Tell you what, boys. When you relax and start allowing tigers to roam around freely in your spaces, I’ll consider relaxing when I find you roaming around in mine. Better yet, until the penis ppl stop battering, murdering and sticking their dicks into women, children and animals. you will be considered dangerous and a menace until further notice. Got a problem with that? Well I guess you’d better get busy and tell your bros to knock it off. Until then, all bets are off. I will consider you a threat and act accordingly.

No one is saying that all males are rapists, but the crimes statistics speak for themselves. Why must we constantly deny reality? There are far more male registered sex offenders than female sex offenders. More males are in prison for sex crimes than females.

The Center for Sex Offender Management from the U.S. Department of Justice states,

March 2007

National criminal justice statistics reveal that of all adults and juveniles who come to the attention of the authorities for sex crimes, females account for less than 10% of these cases (FBI, 2006). Specifically, arrests of women represent only 1% of all adult arrests for forcible rape and 6% of all adult arrests for other sex offenses.

Census and Caseload Data from Criminal and Juvenile Justice Agencies

In contrast to the approximately 140,000 men incarcerated in prisons nationwide for sex crimes, only 1,500 women are estimated to be imprisoned for these offenses (Harrison & Beck, 2005). They represent only 1% of all adults incarcerated for sex offenses, and 2% of all females in prison.

FACT: Women have been raped in restrooms. There are numerous examples.

FACT: Males posing as women have entered women’s restrooms and locker rooms for the purpose of peeping on women. This has even happened at colleges and universities.

“Purdue University police are investigating a reported incident in which a man dressed as a woman was seen taking photographs under the wall of a women’s bathroom stall in Yue-Kong Pao Hall of Visual and Performing Arts.”

“On Monday, October 4, 2010 at 9:20 p.m. and again on Wednesday, October 6, 2010 at 4:30 p.m. a male disguised as a female was discovered in the Recreational Sports Facility women’s locker room. On both occasions the suspect fled the scene when confronted by staff members. In one of the instances the suspect was seen using a cell phone to photograph women inside the locker room.

FACT: Transgender males such as Paula Witherspoon (registered sex offender) have been caught using women’s restrooms.

“San Jose sex offender wearing fake breasts, wig arrested for loitering in womens’ restroom. Richard Rendler, 60, of San Jose, a registered sex offender, found that out on Friday in Campbell, when he was arrested at the PruneYard Shopping Center on misdemeanor loitering charges.

Campbell Police Sgt. Dave Carmichael said Rendler was arrested after having been caught in the womens’ restroom of an unnamed store for “several minutes.”

When I was attending college which was a long time ago, I remember one incident of a man sneaking into the dorms and exposing himself. Two women I knew told me about it. The campus police were called. I’ve also heard several stories of sexual assaults on campus. At a large outdoor concert crowded and packed with drunk students, one girl was dragged into a restroom on campus and raped.

This entire bullshit outrage seems to stem from the myth that women are entitled to have their “female space” in the first place. I mean for fuck’s sake, we are talking about bathrooms. Place where you take a piss and shit, not some holy temple of manhood and womanhood. Sex segregation is just as retarded and discriminatory as race segregation, this entire ZOMG BUT THIS PERSON MIGHT HAVE A DICK sentiment as about as legitimate as a white supremacist being butthurt about having to share the shitter with black people. Grow up, cunts.

Why is race and racism always invoked in these arguments? Sex isn’t race. Is that difficult to understand or something? Nice use of the c-word too.

Nyoo: Don’t tell women to “grow up” and “it doesn’t matter who you piss and shit with” in this aggressive manner when they are saying it does matter. You have no argument. Your personal comfort levels are moot. You have compared single sex bathrooms (an arrangement 99 per cent of people of all races on the planet are happy with) to some kind of apartheid. Because your point is ridiculous, you have made it angrily and used the c-word. We can see what you’re doing.

It’s you who needs to grow up. We women face danger from men in myriad ways, including bathrooms. One example: Richard Rendon, who was mentioned in the above post by S. He also has a criminal history of child sexual annoyance: http://goo.gl/RE3iRO. Men like him pose a huge danger to women and children, and for you to belittle us women is shameful and disgusting.

Why is this even happening, why do people argue like this? Everything I’ve read on this page, I see a coin with twe sides, an argument. And from what I see its clear each side of this argument is saying we are not that bad. When in truth the human race is that bad. Not eveybody is a rapist, but rapist exsist, woman rape too. And because nobody wants to be raped we as human beings act as much as we can to avoid it. I say an xy woman should not be pushed out of the ladies toilets, because more often then not they are in their for the same reasons as xx woman. To protect themselves from what they see as a constant an iminent threat from a would be rapist. However if what any posern does in those toilets is anything but to pee and/or the other, then yes that person should be exspelled from them asap. But those kinds of people exsist in both xx male and male, aswell as xy female and female. Targeting a spacific groop through fear of a chance they might be somthing doesn’t solve anything. I understand people want to protect themselves self preservation is part of being human too, but subjecting hate too another for doing the same is counter praductive. Because All women cis or transe want the same things, to feel safe. Its just unfortunate that some people only care about their own saftey and are will to put other at risk to achieve it, and sometime through what is only a fear of risk.

Sir, only a man like yourself would imagine that women present a rape threat when we pass one in a dark parking lot at night. Try looking at some crime stats, since you have no way of accessing this information through the everyday lived, female, experience that women share, sir. You are a male rape apologist who cares less than nothing about the actual lives of women. Sickening.

I’m very bad at wording it, I’m sorry, I realise my mistake. In thinking only for myself, I saw only people thinking for theirselvs. Rash behavour, sterio typicaly male. I once again apologise. I saw only my own discomfort, and through fear failed to see yours, when I spoke of transe woman, I speak of post op (grs) and when I speak of using female toilets for same the same reason as you, I was reffering to the right that everybody has, to pee in a place they feel safe and comfatable, for transe woman this is the ladies through that self same fear of male abuse. And at first the wording of my argument was forgive my wording “pissed all over” by my own Y cromasome. I hate this. Because its only natural that people don’t like that, that stinks. I do understand your right to feel safe and comfatable, but this is true of anybody, I’m not agreeing that people should be alowed to make other people uncomfatable in order to make themselve comfatable. I was trying to say its a right to everyone to feel safe and comfatable. I apologise for any offence. I can’t stress anough.

Mister you are safe nobody wants to come near you with a 10 foot pole. You get off (erection, ejcaculation) on a whole host of activities–fantasying you are in danger while at the same time invading women–which is a form of rape. Then you thrill from the fantasy of you being raped yet another hot sweaty thought. Yes pretending you are a victim–your money shot. Don’t you dare talk about women. Take you hard dick and back out of the door. I btw don’t give a rats ass how you feel and women’s safety is the issue not your arousal and sexual fetish. As a man you will never understand this. And as a man you are a danger and threat. Go piss on an electirc fence.

Doug is getting certified as a bouncer, which is probably a good choice for someone with so much male aggression. Busting jaws with his click and all.

He doesn’t think there will be anymore issues in the women’s bathrooms because much more “passable” now and displays amazing ignorance when asked about gender-neutral bathrooms. (He is against them because so few people identify as gender-neutral and also they are just disabled toilets renamed anyway.)

“Campus Celebrity” #268! That was the section of the site he was interviewed under. A bona fide “campus celebrity” due his threatening behavior against women in his university and on the interwebs. There might be a market for these cards- another recent one could be that naked creep on a bike who is banned from the University of Toronto. And of course if Doug gets “pretty enough” he might just try his luck in the “adult entertainment industry”. Not porn though, because for guys like this one, everything is a bold choice at his own leisure. Maybe he will use his Phd to make a very comfortable living in Biotech or maybe he will play out his fetish for other dudes on the internet? Whatever he feels like doing! Life is but a dream! He says that his parents don’t support him, but I bet mommy and daddy would disagree that they don’t support him when they are writing out fat checks for his tuition and living expenses. Doubtful that he is getting any US grants or Stafford (unsubsidized) loans for an international university, no work-study, he has no job – sits around on his phone, smoking cigs. I highly doubt that he is encumbering himself with private student loans because that is not how entitled little pricks like this one get through life. The world owes this pig a beautiful life as a beautiful sexsky laydee and if you say no, he will bust your jaw with his click. One of the worst offenders I have seen in a while. Truly, an interview with a hideous man.

That guy is the gift of comedy gold and just keeps on giving…in the same interview where he talks about the bathroom situation ‘othering’ him, he then goes on about “I’d like to find a nice guy, a nice girl or a nice transsexual.”

If he really believed that they were just “guys and girls” then why would he even ever include a third category?

They are so full of shit that they cannot even keep it consistent in the same fucking interview…

Notice how he doesn’t get that gender-neutral mean that the bathrooms are for everyone. He thinks that gender-neutral bathrooms are for only for people “identifying” as gender-neutral. Wut. Is he thinking about people who “identify” as asexual? How can gender-neutral bathrooms “other” any person? Trans Logic . . . Defying Logic since Forever. His word vomit means little anyway because the reality is that gender-neutral bathrooms are indeed a waste of space for this dude and other like him, because they do not reinforce his delusion/fantasy/fetish.
. . .

What are your thoughts on the introduction of gender-neutral toilets in the union?

We’re not gender neutral, we’re guys and girls! We don’t want to be “othered”. People who actually see themselves as gender neutral are so rare.

But if they are, surely there should still be provision for them?

We have disabled toilets, the gender neutral toilets are basically disabled toilets renamed. I don’t see the point of wasting more space.