After recieving a really indepth and inspiring response to one of my posts I thought I should post the other two fotos in me portfolio. The model is Maria, and she currently live in Marrocco. The theme behind it all is the relationship between people and internet... the black thing in the corner is an IBM think pad.... in the second foto the shadow of the arm holding the gun represents something like 'internet killed the video star.' and maybe more. Let me know what you think.
To see them all together have a look at my portfolio.... many thanks

I see what you're getting at as far as your theme for these images. I'm not so sure I see an "internet killed the video star" kind of thing going on, though (could you maybe explain a little more what you mean by that?).

What I do see, though (and this is where bigger images posted would help, if it's possible), is a girl lured into the "dark side" of the web, so to speak (sex, porn, or something like that), and perhaps getting into more than she bargained for but not realizing it just yet. I get that sense especially with the two images as a series. In other words, I wouldn't really feel that way with just the first image.

The only quibble I have is that it's not totally obvious (to me, anyway), that the Think Pad is a Think Pad/laptop. I think seeing that that is indeed a laptop/computer is paramount to your theme. Maybe, again, if the images were bigger, it might be more obvious.

I do like the composition better in the second one. The dark area of the Think Pad in the first one feels very heavy to me in that area, IMHO, but mainly because I don't get a sense of a balancing value anywhere in the rest of the image. It's either that, or there might be a bit too much open space (the orange cloth), one of the two. In the second one, her hair dark helps to balance it out, for me.

I hope you don't feel I'm critiquing too harshly in any way-- I'm simply stating the first things that come to mind. One of these days soon (hopefully) I'll post some images, and feel free to rip into 'em when I do. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Sam

(I keep forgetting to post an image with a critique... [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img])

Thanks for the critique, please don't worry about being harsh!! Be as blunt as you can be!! It's nice to hear something constuctive, for most of my friends will only say if they like it or not in suger coated methods.
As I mentioned in the other post the quality of the image has been reduced after it was scanned in... In regards to colour... the orange cloth you mentioned is actually red (again I need a new scanner). The Ibm think pad logo is too small, but inlarging them does make them more obvious. I plan on redoing the whole series on my newly aquired Yashica MAT-124, with a different model, once I get those in I'll post them.
Thank you for your comments. Talk to you soon.
mike

Cool, I try to be a constructive as I can. Most people I show work to here (at home, not GG) just say "that's good" or "I don't like it", which really doesn't tell me much. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] I do have two friends who are going through school for photography, though -- they're definitely not afraid to tell me if my work sucks or not, but they also tell me how they feel it could be improved, too. [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Oops, I wasn't sure if the cloth was red or orange (it was getting late [img]/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]) That Yashica is a 6x6, isn't it? Can't wait to see your stuff in that format.

in image 2, and assuming the fine art point of the image is the gun pointed at her head, albeit depicted with a shadow, there's a little problem: according to the light source and the location of the shadow and the direction the muzzle is pointed, the gun, in fact, is not pointed at her. it is to her left, pointed away from her.