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Thursday, April 18, 2013

Music is constantly changing.Trends come and go, one hit wonders get their
brief fame, people become stars for making good (ex: Radiohead), and sometimes,
not good music (ex: Rebecca Black).Music
can relax us, annoy us, intrigue us, scare us, change us, and make us relate to
things in life.There are times where we
can’t get enough music by certain artists.Some artists can never do wrong and we will accept their music no matter
what, as if they are timeless.Some
artists we get rightfully sick of due to the endless airtime they get on radio
stations and commercials.This can be a
problem for people who appreciate music and care about what they listen
to.One of the most annoying things to
me personally is when I hear a song or music by an artist come on the radio
that just won’t die.This being said,
I’ve noticed this annoyance occurring more and more often in my life, so to
help me combat this annoyance, here is a list of people and things in the music
industry that just has to go away ASAP. Also, special thanks to Annik Spencer for editing this fine piece of literature. Job well done Neekiepoo.

Fun.- The band whose music is the perfect fit for Kidz Bop
cd’s.These guys blew up last year and
slowly got more and more boring by each additional single that they
released.I hear ‘Carry On’ on the radio
and I instantly fall asleep out of boredom.This is a band who may be talented but is in desperate need to take off
some time (like a year or five), just for the sake of those who do not
appreciate hearing the same songs over and over again wherever they go.Also, what’s up with fun.’s pants?They bother me.

fun.'s new album cover

Pitbull- Why is he everywhere?Pitbull is the king of rapping in Spanglish,
but I’m really unsure as to why he has become the face of Bud Light.If I were to win a contest from Bud Light,
I’d be pretty disappointed to have the ‘grand prize’ be to party with Pitbull
in Miami.My problem with Pitbull is
that he just seems to rattle off names of cities like he’s trying to figure out
where Carmen San Diego is.I also seem
to notice a lot of counting in his songs.I have also realized after listening to 5 previews of his songs on
iTunes that I have absolutely no idea what he is saying in his songs.His song “Give Me Everything” is catchy, but
there is no surefire way to ruin a song than dropping Lindsay Lohan’s name in
it.We can only take so much of your nonsense,
Pitbull.Time for you to go away.

Excited upon the news of becoming the face of Bud Light

Mumford & Sons/Lumineers/Of Monsters and Men:New Wave Folk?Folk Revival?What the hell happened this past year when folk became popular? I mean, I liked that commercial for Blue Moon
with the Lumineers in it as much as everyone else, but music from these 3 bands
has gotten out of control.It seems as
if radio thinks they’re doing something so ‘different’ by overplaying these
bands, who all sound the same.Honestly,
I’m starting to have trouble keeping these three apart because they just seem
to blend together.At work yesterday,
songs by these three bands were played in a 15 minute span of each other, and I
felt like I was going to die of boredom.I feel that when we look back in 10 years at who won the Grammy for
Album of the Year in 2013, we will all be scratching our heads at how Mumford
& Sons won.Honestly, Of Monsters
and Men stands out to me since they are slightly different by alternating the
male and female singers.Besides that,
these three sound the exact same, and I’m still puzzled by this newfound love
of folk going mainstream.In this day
and age, the only way folk should be relevant is if Bob Dylan reissues old
albums or something.On a side note:
could Mumford & Sons really become anymore flamboyant!? Geez they need to
tone things down.

The excitement is just overwhelming.

The “Now That’s What I Call Music!” Series:This is the true indicator of how kids
growing up in the 90’s feel old.My
sister and I are proud owners of the very first Now CD which came out in
October of 1998.On May 7th
of this year, Now 46 is going to be released.This is something extremely scary, and makes me feel way past my
prime.46?I don’t even wanna think about turning 23, never
mind 46.This is utter madness, and
needs to be stopped.Before searching it
up, my original thought was that there was only one or two per year, then
somewhere along the line with falling CD sales they started releasing
more.I was sort of right about that,
and some highlights are Now 41-44 all being released in 2012 and 33-36 in
2010.Four Now Cd’s in one year?Nonsense.This is a case of quantity over quality.Let’s go back in time to Now 3, featuring blink-182, Fatboy Slim, Limp
Bizkit (!), Lenny Kravitz, Garbage and Fastball.Sure, seems dated, but most of these artists
are somewhat respected (except you, Fred Durst), and they are songs that I
still listen to today (What’s My Age Again? Is a timeless classic, for
example).Let’s look at Now 45, which
came out in February: Ed Sheeran(who?), Phillip Phillips (!), Taylor Swift
(Ugh), Pitbull (told you it sucks), Flo Rida (really?), and The Script
featuring will.i.am (depressing).If you
ask me, this CD should be entitled “Wow! That’s What I Call Depressing!”.A song featuring will.i.am is on a CD that is
supposed to capture the noteworthy music of a period of time?Get with it.I hope to God that the Now series will end at 50.The Now series is similar to that of an old
horse.It makes me and people my age
feel old, and it has to be put down.

Simpler times. Sigh.

Bieber:Complaining
about how his birthday sucked, starting and losing a twitter war with Black
Keys drummer Patrick Carney, stealing haircuts from Vanilla Ice and/or La Roux,
it’s all getting pretty annoying.I
don’t get why so much media time is spent on him.He’s kind of a dweeb in my opinion.I understand that millions of young girls and
a lot of creepy people love him, but I just can’t stand opening Yahoo and being
bombarded with headlines about him getting into slap fights with paparazzi and
him feeling woozy during a show.Recently,
he wrote that he hoped that Anne Frank would have been a Belieber, which is one
of the most mind numbing things ever written.He hopes that Anne Frank was a Belieber?Yeah, I’m sure she would’ve loved your music back in Nazi occupied
Amsterdam.Sure, there may be that fear
of getting sent to concentration camp, but as long as she had Justin Bieber and
his inspiring music, everything would be okay.Bullshit.I mean, I would hope
that Charles Bukowksi would be a reader of my blog if he were still alive, but
I’d wouldn’t say this at his gravesite or anything.This whole mess just makes Bieber even more
arrogant than ever.Even when he is at
an Anne Frank memorial, he has to involve his name somehow to get attention. His music sucks and he still looks like he’s
12.Bieber Fever needs to be cured
pronto.

The pride of Canada

Lil Wayne:When was
the last time he made good music?I’m
not the biggest fan of him in general, but in all honesty, all I’ve ever heard
people talk about concerning his last three albums was that they sucked.He’s seen Drake and Nikki Minaj surpass him
in fame over the past few years, while the only headlines he’s made has revolved
around prison, and seizures because he does drugs.Then again, I’d probably do drugs too if I
was the sole reason for making Nikki Minaj a household name.Lil Wayne is starting to go on the track to
become the Jim Morrison of rap, which most likely won’t end well.

﻿﻿

Just dripping with talent

Chris Brown:This is
a real, honest, serious question- Do people like Chris Brown?Everyone I know despises him.I see tweets and facebook posts claiming how
big of an asshole he is, yet he still seems to be popular.His first offense is dying his hair
blonde.Secondly, he beats his
girlfriend.Third, he calls out Frank
Ocean, someone who made an album this past year which Brown could only dream of
making, for being gay.In this day and
age, that’s not really the smartest move to pull.I can’t name you one song he has come out
with in the past few years, and he seems to only make headlines for the trouble
he gets in.Being famous for being hated
isn’t the best claim to have.It took
Chris Brown a while to gain back the fans that he lost the first time around
after beating Rihanna, and that was mostly by having a fan appreciation tour
with tickets that were dirt cheap.You
would think that after doing this (this definitely cost him some money) he
would learn his lesson and try to stay out of trouble, you know, since he’s
lucky enough to be as popular as he is before pissing it all away by cowardly
hitting his public icon of a girlfriend, but Chris Brown is such a dingus that
he still manages to get in trouble.It
also doesn’t help that he and his posse dressed as terrorists for
Halloween.In a post 9/11 world,
dressing as a terrorist isn’t really the smartest thing to do, especially when
people are just looking for you to screw up and cause some more controversy.All in all, Chris Brown sucks.He hasn’t made any good music lately, his
blonde hair is a travesty to the history of hairstyle, and he needs to go away.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Fans of the Boston Bruins are ecstatic to learn of the acquistion of hockey legend Jaromir Jagr to the squad. For all you people who don't follow hockey, Jagr is one of the greatest players to ever lace up the skates. The fact that he has joined the Bruins makes me pretty pumped. Hell, I even cracked a smile when I learned of the news. It was a rough week for Bruins fans when that prick Jarome Iginla chose to play for the Penguins over the Bruins. This trade for Jagr makes up for everything. Honestly, I'd take Jagr over Iginla any day of the week, and we gave up less for Jagr than we offered for Iginla, so this is a good day. To celebrate this glorious occasion, here are some of the best pictures on google of Jagr, most featuring his beloved mullet from the early-mid 90's. Enjoy.