The Two Smith's

A gentleman took lodgings in the same house with James
Smith, one of the celebrated authors of the "Rejected Addresses." His name
was also James Smith. The consequence was an eternal confusion of calls and
letters, and the postman had no alternative but to share the letters
equally between the two. "This is intolerable, sir," said our author, "you
must quit." "Why am I to quit more than you?" "Because you came last, and
being James the Second you must _abdicate_."

Coleridge, the Poet, once dined in company with a person who listened to
the conversation and said nothing for a long time; but occasionally nodded
his head, and Coleridge concluded him a thoughtful and intelligent man. At
length, towards the end of the dinner, some apple dumplings were placed on
the table, and the listener had no sooner seen them than he burst forth,
"Them's the fellows for me!" Coleridge adds: "I wish Spurzheim could have
examined the fellow's head."