Paper magazine undertook the arduous task of categorizing all the famous packages on display this year for its “definitive” list of the top 15 celebrity bulges of 2012. Winners included fan faves like Milo Ventimiglia, David Beckham, Andrew Garfield, Ryan Lochte, and everyone in Magic Mike.

Honestly, we probably would’ve put Jon Hamm for all 15 spots and called it a day.