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Meanwhile…on a dating site that shall remain nameless…

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I just received the following email:

“You are very attractive, I cant quite figure what makes you so alluring, but you are!!!! good luck finding someone.”

Here’s what I read:

“Your pictures are good enough that, in the last two weeks, I’ve already “liked” two of them, and I know I’ve winked at you, but you haven’t responded, so I’m going to send this slightly passive aggressive email, that slightly insults you, but let’s you know that, despite the fact that you’re attractiveness is, at best, quirky in some way…that I still want to do you. If you don’t date me…you will likely die alone.”