Tuesday, March 21, 2017

One of our main missions here at Slumlog is to make Summers a nicer place to hang so that we and other customers and even random passersby can come and in and enjoy themselves even for a brief period after work before they have to head to a home they would rather avoid, and we do that by calling Joe on his shenanigans and pointing out all the shortcomings of his servers and waitstaff.

But every once in a while w have to sit back and enjoy the glory that is Summers. First, we should appreciate the foot traffic that wanders, saunters, skips, runs, walks, plods, crawls, marches, meanders, bounces, drives, cycles, hops, bops, clops, drops or struts by Summers.

The people watching at Summers, especially when the weather is good, is amazing.

It is a pity Joe hasn't done more to capitalize on the prime location.

Saturday, March 18, 2017

No luck for anyone else either. Joe in all his infinite dumbness didn't learn from his mistakes on St. Patrick's Day last when amateur drinks decided to spend the day out and tried to go to Four Courts like everyone else in Arlington and couldn't get in there so they decided to go to the next closet bar which was right across the street and which happens to be Summers.

Summers was packed at peak St. Patrick's Day time and customers had to wait twice or three times as long as normal to get a drink. Joe should have doubled his staff or opened the Red Room.

It was just another day (& another St. Patrick's Day) when Joe proves he doesn't listen, he's incapable of learning from his mistakes and he doesn't really care about the customers that come to Summers.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Joe should probably check on Summers' beer tubes
Beer is always warm and could use some ice cubes
Joe should also check the taps
What the hell happened to Pabst?
At least my beer glass doesn't have pubes

To celebrate Saint Patrick's Day 2017 Summers has not instituted a Limerick Contest. The winner will not be awarded a gift certificate for food or drink at Summers because Joe is stingy, also because this is not an officially-endorsed Summers contest. Those usually end in the prize money being withheld because Joe changed his mind after the fact or because he was disappointed at the poor turnout at one of his events that he forgot about and didn't mention to anyone.

The only reason we are holding this fake limerick contest is because Joe [insert euphemism here: "totally fucked up", "bungled", "completely forgot about", "mismanaged", "didn't give a sh!t about", "failed to remember to mention/advertise", "half-assed", "Monday morning-quarterbacked", "was hoping customers wouldn't notice he's completely dismissed them from his mind", "doesn't care about his customers are thinking and never seizes on any genuine business opportunities like drinking the night before the first day of Lent"] the traditional Mardi Gras Celebration at Summers.

So we need to make Summers great again by having a fake limerick contest.