I know it’s a lot: the dice, the screen!
When you’re staring at a character sheet

What can I say except you’re welcome
For the dice, the dungeon, the monsters
Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay
You’re welcome
I’m just an extra-ordinary DM

Hey!
What has two thumbs that drew up the dungeon
When you were waddling yay high
This guy!

When the days got dark
Who stole you to adventures down below
You’re lookin’ at him, yo

Oh, also I planted the treasures
You’re welcome!
To stretch the days and bring you fun

Also I bound the rulebooks
You’re welcome!
To fill your dreams and shake your days

So what can I say except you’re welcome
For the adventures I pulled from the sheet
There’s no need to pray, it’s okay
You’re welcome!
Ha, I guess it’s just my way of being me
You’re welcome!
You’re welcome!

Well, come to think of it
Kid, honestly I can go on and on
I can explain every hack’n’slash phenomenon
The dice, the orcs, the goblins, oh
That was DM just messing around

I killed a party
I buried treasure
Sprouted a story, now you got adventure
What’s the lesson
What is the story
Don’t mess with DM the master of ploy

And the tapestry here on my screen
Is a map of the parties I’ve slain
Look where I’ve played
I make everything happen
Look at the minis and the dice just tippity-tappin’