Letting Go – Getting Tidy

Serendipity – that’s what led me to Marie Kondo’s book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying-up. Noshing and shopping with my good buddy Sally, I mentioned the $25 Barnes & Nobel gift card burning a hole in my pocket; time to cash it in. As we wandered the store poking here and there – I was uninspired; unusual for me in a book store! Cruised my favorite haunts – Philosophy, Religion, Psych. Nada. Wandered over to “Self Help” .. still nothing. Then it popped into my head. That book on Tidying – saw it on the AJC’s Best Sellers List last week.

Making physical room in the “stuff” department isn’t new for me. After my divorce moons ago I sold most everything a house can hold to move into an apartment with two girlfriends. It was painful seeing my “married” stuff go … but it was for a good cause. My beautiful friends gave me the best sandwich hug afterwards and a bruising headache vanished.

Marie Kondo is leading me through the letting go process in a different, very positive way. She’s asking me not to see this activity as getting rid of things I don’t want; rather surrounding myself with things that bring me joy.

Amazingly this point-of-view is very quantum.

“The things we own are real. They exist here and now as a result of choices made in the past by no one other than ourselves … the fate that links us to the things we own is quite amazing.”

“The destiny that led us to each one of our possessions is just as precious and sacred as the destiny that connected us with the people in our lives. There is a reason why each of your belongings came to you.”

Kondo says: “The question of what you want to own is actually the question of how you want to live your life.” When I look around and acknowledge my world as a reflection of who I am, do I see happy? Do I see happy relationships, right work; do I like how I show up in the world? Does my physical environment bring me joy?

“The process of facing and selecting our possessions can be quite painful. It forces us to confront our imperfections and inadequacies and the foolish choices we made in the past.”

Yes; I JUST bought that blouse – why did I like it so much that day? Buh-bye.

The KomMari Method has a specific order to tidying: “start with clothes, then move on to books, papers, komono (miscellany), and finally things with sentimental value.” It’s HARD to let stuff go – as John Lennon asked many years ago “imagine no possessions, I wonder if you can.”

“When we really delve into the reasons for why we can’t let something go, there are only two: an attachment to the past or a fear for the future.”

“As you put your house in order … you’ll see what your true values are, what is really important to you in your life.” … “To put your things in order means to put your past in order too, It’s like resetting your life and settling your accounts so you can take the next step forward.”

Ms. Kondo recommends we do this all at once – don’t drag it out. I’ll tackle one major category each weekend (okay – I see komono and its TEN sub-categories requiring several weekends). One step at a time – consistently and with dedication to a lighter, easier me.