If I started this post out by saying I'm crazy, I'd be scared that all I'd get are comments agreeing with that sentiment, not comments of substance.

A lot of things have been driving me crazy or at least causing me to have doubts about what is to come. First of all, ehowton disappeared last week and I was really worried about him. I sent him a text and he confirmed that he was alright, but still, it has been several days that since his last public post on LJ. Couple that with terse or no responses to a few of my own posts, I knew that not all was right. Well, today I got news that everything is well, even if he is the worst for wear.

Speaking of positive news, I started the tech support job today. My boss keeps telling me that it takes most people a couple of months before they have their first live call, but I am confident that I will be online within a few weeks. My goal is to be so two weeks from today (Monday) as the guy I was training with claimed that he too made the transition in two weeks.

Other things that were disconcerting about last week was not having heard from melancthe now in two weeks. That has been most hard. While I worry for and about her, I leave it in good faith that she is doing alright because I have not heard otherwise. I miss talking to her; she has such a sexy South African accent. (To me it is a British accent even though she denies it.) melancthe, please come talk to us soon; the suspense is killing us.

I went home the great town of Juanita this weekend to see the play that my parents put on. It was something they toured 48 times in three States. However, it was written in the 70's and they used a cassette from the same era. The tape hiss was intolerable...as was the performance. One thing that did occur to me while watching that play was the diminishing return factor in entertainment.

I do not want to work two jobs. I wished that the tech support job paid enough to just quit Steak Out. There has been talk of doing some A/V work with Jesse, perhaps as early as two months from now. I'd rather supplement that way. Hell, I'd drive the 45 minutes to Cullman (and back) ever night if I were going to be able to do video and get paid for it. Please cross your fingers concerning this issue.

I've occupied my time the past two weeks with The Twilight of Courage (Hardcover, Softcover). I prefer the hardback myself. The book just went out of print late last year, so you will have to purchase it off of Amazon. I'll put text from the dust jacket behind a cut.

Between the sky and the assembly, a cloud of red and black banners unfurled, fluttering in time to the trumpet blasts. The expectation of the gathering had reached a feverish pitch, exactly the right moment for their worship to appear. As if controlled by a single switch, all light and sound vanished. The arena was plunged into absolute blackness and total stillness with such suddenness that thousands believed they had been struck both deaf and blind in that instant. And then...a single spotlight reached out from the back of the stadium, stabbing the highest podium. As if by magic, the lectern was now occupied by the stern, brooding figure of Adolf Hitler.

As the clouds of war gather over an unprepared Europe, the remarkable and stories of an international cast of characters unfold in The Twilight of Courage. Follow diverse and memorable personalities such as American journalists Josie Marlow and Mac McGrath as they narrowly escape from the collapse of Warsaw in the fall of 1939 and suddenly find themselves caught up in the events of the so-called Twilight War--when Hitler was preparing to march and the Allies did nothing to stop him.

Meet Polish mathematics genius Richard Lewinski who heads a desperate attempt to crack the Nazi secret code; brother Andre and Paul Chardon who organize an heroic defense of the French Calvary School in Lys; German Captain Horst von Bockman who is caught between the love of his country and the insanity of war, and David Meyer, an American pilot who, shot down during an air war, struggles to escape the German onslaught and return to the lovely English woman Annie Galaway.

From Mac's expirences at Dunkirk to Josie's expirences in Paris, The Twilight of Courage brings to life the cataclysm of war as seen through the eyes of men and women who faced unbelievable challenges in a time of crisis.

Intricately woven and impeccably researched The Twilight of Courage is a war story, a love story and a spy story wrapped into one unforgettable package.

The other thing that I have filled my time with is studying illusions in the hopes of performing magic. I have already sunk a small fortune into this pursuit and expect a third large package/order sometime this week. While I have shunned a large portion of the material, I have found a few illusions that I want to master and may give those which I so glibly passed over a second chance.

I am ready for change. While change in and of itself is truly neither good nor bad, there are some things I don't want to change, some I wished would get back to the way they were, and still others I will be glad to see changed and will not remember them any other way but in their changed state. I wished I had gotten a white collar job many years ago.

Congratulations on your first day of Tech Support! Check you out! You go boy - w00 w00! I'm very excited for you, opening this new chapter in your life. And don't worry, you'll be up and running in no time, you're smart like that. Just don't go fuck it up by mouthing off to anyone, ok?

We had the right love At the wrong time Guess I always knew inside I wouldn't have you for a long time

Those dreams of yours Are shining on distant shores And if they're calling you away I have no right to make you stay But

Somewhere down the road Our roads are gonna cross again It doesn't really matter when But somewhere down the road I know that heart of yours will come to see That you belong with me

Sometimes goodbyes are not forever It doesn't matter if you're gone I still believe in us together I understand more than you think I can You have to go out on your own So you can find your way back home And

Somewhere down the road Our roads are gonna cross again It doesn't really matter when But somewhere down the road I know that heart of yours will come to see That you belong with me Letting go is just another way to say I'll always love you so

We had the right love At the wrong time Maybe we've only just begun Maybe the best is yet to come 'Cause

Somewhere down the road Our roads are gonna cross again It doesn't really matter when But somewhere down the road I know that heart of yours will come to see That you belong With me

I used to think that i could not go on that life was nothing but an awful songbut now i now the meaning of true love i'm leaning on the everlasting arms

if i can see it, then i can do it if i just believe it ,theres nothing to it

i believe i can fly i believe i can tuch the skyi think about it every night and day spread my wings and fly awayi believe i can soari see me running through that open doori believe i can fly, i believe i can fly, i believe i can fly

see i was on the verge of braking downsomtimes silence can seem so loud there are miracles in life i must achievebut first i now it starts inside of me

if i can see it, then i can do it if i just belive it, theres nothing to it

i believe i can fly i believe i can touch the skyi think about it every night and dayspread my wings and fly awayi believe i can soari see me running through that open doori believe i can fly, i believe i can fly, i believe i can fly

cuz i belive in meoh oh oh

if i can see it then i can do it if i just belive it theres nothing to it

i believe i can fly i believe i can touch the skyi think about it every night and dayspread my wings and fly awayi believe i can soari see me running through that open doori believe i can fly, i believe i can fly, i believe i can flyFly......y.......y

I hope you get your girlfriend back.Every time I look in the mirror All these lines on my face getting clearer The past is gone It goes by, like dusk to dawn Isn't that the way Everybody's got their dues in life to pay

Yeah, I know nobody knows where it comes and where it goes I know it's everybody's sin You got to lose to know how to win

Half my life is in books' written pages Lived and learned from fools and from sages You know it's true All the things come back to you

Sing with me, sing for the year Sing for the laughter, sing for the tears Sing with me, if it's just for today Maybe tomorrow, the good lord will take you away

Yeah, sing with me, sing for the year sing for the laughter, sing for the tear sing with me, if it's just for today Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away

Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream until your dreams come true Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream until your dream comes through Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream On Dream On

Sing with me, sing for the year sing for the laughter, sing for the tear sing with me, if it's just for today Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away Sing with me, sing for the year sing for the laughter, sing for the tear Sing with me, if it's just for today Maybe tomorrow, the good Lord will take you away......