2. If You Don’t [blank] Now, You’ll Hate Yourself Later.

We love to belong, but feeling excluded is a real bummer. Whether it be a financial opportunity or the social event of the year, we simply hate it when we get left out.

If You’re Out of the Market Now, You’ll Hate Yourself Later.

If You’re Not at SXSW 2007, You’ll Hate Yourself Later.

If You Don’t Edit Your .htaccess Now, Google Will Hate You Later.

3. The Lazy [blank’s] Way to [blank].

This headline has always worked well with time-pressured people, and that’s certainly true for most people today. No one likes to think of themselves as lazy, but everyone likes to save time and effort.

The Lazy Man’s Way to Riches.

The Lazy Dad’s Way to Quickly Getting Dinner on the Table.

The Lazy Blogger’s Way to Write Great Post Titles.

4. Do You Recognize the [number] Early Warning Signs of [blank]?

OK, technically this is still a list, but it’s wrapped up in a much more compelling structure than your typical “Top 10” article. People want to avoid problems, and this headline promises the critical tips before it’s too late.

Do You Recognize the 7 Early Warning Signs of High Blood Pressure?

Do You Recognize the 7 Early Warning Signs of an Employee Meltdown?

Do You Recognize the 7 Early Warning Signs of Digg Addiction?

5. See How Easily You Can [desirable result].

We love quick and easy when it comes to learning something new or gaining some advantage.

See How Easily You Can Learn to Dance This New Way.

See How Easily You Can Own a Lamborghini Miura.

See How Easily You Can Increase Traffic With Social Media.

6. You Don’t Have to Be [something challenging] to be [desired result].

People almost always have preconceived notions about things, and this can be a barrier to taking action. Remove the barrier that stands between them and the desired result with your headline, and people will flock to read what you have to say.

You Don’t Have to Be Rich to Retire on a Guaranteed Income for Life.

You Don’t Have to Be a Geek to Make Money Online.

You Don’t Have to Be an A-Lister to Be a Kick-Ass Blogger.

7. Do You Make These Mistakes?

This is always a powerful attention grabber, since no one likes to make mistakes. If you’ve targeted your content well for your intended audience, helping people avoid common mistakes is a sure-fire winner with this type of headline.

The presumption behind each and every one of them is that the author is an authority on whatever the headline is about. What this will spawn is a ton of half-baked folks declaring themselves instant authorities (add water and stir?) on whatever topics they decide to hold forth about, with the “voice” of the headline fueling a POV that is intellectually insulting to anyone who reads it.

Please understand, I am all about empowering writers to learn to feel the force of their own voices, their own authority. What I object to is advocating anti-intellectual authoritarianism as the best way to do this.

We need a world with MORE critical thinking and questioning. We don’t need to be conditioning audiences to be MORE sonambulistic and sheep-like followers of authorities than they already are.

Preaching to would-be bloggers that they should adopt a preachy, authoritarian tone in their headlines tells them, 1. that authorities rule the world and people always obediently do what they are told, and 2. that if you want to have power, to be empowered, you should assume the narrow-minded, brook-no-argument stance of a voice-of-god authority, and do your best to create your own flock of mindless sheep who will do whatever you tell them.

Argument from authority is nothing more than the parental “because I said so” argument. It is intellectually thin, vapid, and ridiculous. Laughable to any critical thinkers who actually demand substance and support behind any presumed authority claiming to tell THEM what to do.

Truly empowered critical thinkers and writers will have no use for such rhetorical ploys, nor will they willingly follow such rhetorical constructs without serious questions, questions that I doubt can be answered without a begging-the-question referral to SEO.

I’m afraid I must be somewhat unusual. I purposefully ignore most articles with headlines following the formats you mention because more often than not they are followed by some painful advertising ploy. Using one of these types of headlines is a sure-fire way to discourage me from reading the associated article / blog post.

Brian, I appreciate your help and blog so much that I have written an article about it on Gather.com. And today, it is being featured in one of the groups I belong to, “Post What Doesn’t Fit Anywhere Else” @ http://www.noplacelikehere.gather.com

Ohh, how EVER did you even finish reading the entire post through…with all 7 of Brian’s rhetorical-ploy-landmines in your way? Surely, you would have exited after suffering the effects of the first, and surely we would expect nothing less of you than you NOT stooping to leave a comment in such a place.

I’m no marketer, but I’d say Brian got inside your head and made you respond like a puppet on a string.

You could video tape and sell the exorcism of Brian from your mind and call it “7 critical steps to exorcisms”.

Brian,
It is far too often that great articles go completely to waste due to the lack of time put into arguably the most important element of the article… the headline. The importance of writing a brilliant headline sometimes falls to the wayside because writers are so focused on ensuring great content in the heart of the article. The tendancy to overlook this vital element can cost a great article to be laid to rest before anyone has had the opportunity to take a glimpse. Ideas for effective headlines always help! So thanks!

Is it me, or does all this emphasis on how to get traffic by using catching headings just seem short-sighted? At first I was interested in learning how to write better headlines, but after reading numerous articles on the subject it seems all the emphasis is on snagging clicks instead of on writing useful and compelling content.

If every blog story has a headline like those headline will become ineffective anyway as people who click the links and find nothing useful and then ask “Where’s the beef?” and starting mentally filtering out those kinds of articles.

It seems like these suggestions for writing headlines are offered like how people offer “exercise-free diet pills” and people who want results without any effort just lap them us. Isn’t it better to pick a niche and focus on becoming the authority in that niche then to focus on writing click-catching headlines for
vacuous content?

Sorry, I should have made clear my rant was in general because there are lots of blog posts like this on other sites, not specifically about your post. And it was also more from the impressions I get from many commenters (which may be wrong impressions) that they are looking for the pain-free quick-fix solution. I guess my comments were more to make the point then to criticize.

One point of note, though, since many people come to a blog from links on other people’s site or in their emails or even Digg, it’s important to understand that posts should be made to standalone. I guess it would have been better if you had included the following (in bold) to close your post:

“REMEMBER, great headlines with poor content are worse than getting no links at all because you’ll brand yourself as being opportunistic and vacuous. So if you don’t have great content first be sure to create great content before using any of these headlines. You’ll thank yourself for it in the morning. :)”

One of the key points to remember when constructing headlines is are you using the “hot words” and “hot phrases” that will trigger a response in your target market. The headline is really nothing more than a place holder for inserting these “hot words and phrases”.

I think if you could craft headlines that grab the attention of prospective customers AND also help a site to rank well with search engines, you’d be a rich person. If someone wants to write headlines for Google AdWords, it’s easier because you pay per click so it doesn’t matter how “relevant” they are to a search engine; however, it’s challenging because we’re trying to market http://www.lumensflashlights.com without using Adwords, but it seems that the headlines Google favor may not necessarily grab our target audience. If anyone has any valuable resources, please let us know! Thanks, Justin

This may be one of the most important skill sets (writing effective headlines) in any form of advertising/marketing. I appreciate your advice.

In a book about advertising entitled “Wizard of Ads”, the author explains that too many people (even marketers) assume that people want to read their ad (or article in this case). However, the author gave an excellent rule-of-thumb:

First, earn their attention…

Second, earn their money.

People are constantly being inundated with marketing messages. An effective headline can convince a busy American (-: that they need to read your article or ad.

One of the great minds of advertising (David Ogilvy?) spent much time and emphasis on headlines…for good reason: he know effective headlines = nice bottom line.

Fantastic! I was researching sites and information for an upcoming blog post and found your site. I will be sure to mention your site and this post in particular. This information will be very handy for my readers and visitors.

I have to say, Brian, however, that I don’t agree with your approach to comments. Why so sensitive to Miasma? And then you shot him or her down, and that encouraged a slew of other comments in the same vein, so we have a ganging up that is annoying.

I think it adds verity and punch when other commenters disagree with a commenter, rather than the blog owner.

Today is July 6th and I’m just getting starting relaunching my wordpress powered blog at http://www.jasonciment.com and i want it on record that at least 17 blog posts will be using Brian’s surefire headlines over the next 21 days.

I recommend reading “Ogilvy on Advertising”, a book written by the lade David Ogilvy of Ogilvy & Mather Advertising. He talks of the most important rules to follow when writing advertising headlines… They are tried and true. Of course, I am VERY impressed with the content of this blog as well. Thanks!

Hi,
As always love how your blog continually produces great content inspires me to do so as well. Your content doesn’t seem to age but really stands out. I’ve been following your blog for quite some time and included your blog on headline writing in my latest post titled: Why Bad Headlines Can Kill Good Content. Given my journalism background and TV writing, I’ve learned this valuable trick of the trade, which is to write interesting and engaging headlines followed by what I hope to be good, supportive content. I believe that headline is the key to capturing your readers to click through to read the rest of the content. I’ve quoted you in the blog (hope that is okay) but you gave me some great materials to work with. Thanks again.

I’m really trying to understand this stuff. Working hard and I think I’m a creative and entertaining copy writer so I’m loving these tips. Thank you. I have 16 other websites up so as you can see this great information on headlines is going to keep me busy for the next couple of days. I use wordpress and I’m new at it but you’re helping me a lot. Mainly because I’m not getting the results I expected to be honest. But I’m going to stay at it. I have to! I need $!

Between me and my husband we’ve owned more MP3 players over the years than I can count, including Sansas, iRivers, iPods (classic & touch), the Ibiza Rhapsody, etc. But, the last few years I’ve settled down to one line of players. Why? Because I was happy to discover how well-designed and fun to use the underappreciated (and widely mocked) Zunes are.

There are some good titles here. The one I hate though is
“who else…. ,” you know, “who else wants to learn to make thousands while on the toilet”. For some reason that one bothers me. But I guess it works.

One thing that will help newbie blogger to be successful is visiting this blog and read all it post to get a lot of new knowledge. First I only know Problogger and Yaro Starak and Now I now this blog. So you are lucky I will come often 🙂

I am delighted with the valuable information you provide. For my own subscribers, I decided to create a 2 minute video, summarizing some of the key points you make and encouraging my readers to go and see for themselves. (Creating backlinks to your various articles)

Again, in the name of my several hundred subscribers and myself, thank you very much, indeed, for this great information you offer for free. Information and knowledge which I would otherwise need to pay for, in the form of expensive consultancy fees.

If anyone wishes to view the video and embed it into their own website, you are most welcome 🙂