Diabolical Bed Bug Terror Plot Revealed

In 2007, in a remote area of Amish, Amed Ben Gauly, opened a research lab, and started developing a species of bed bugs that were more resilient than current strains of bed bugs. After developing the strain in a male bed bug, his research team started looking for a rare strain of female bed bugs called the nymphomaniagratis, or female bed bugs that had been created that thrived on reproduction.

With the consent and blessing of Ben Laden, the bedbugs were introduced into this country in a shipment of heaters that the Amish in Pennsylvania had made the wooden frame for and were subsequently sent to China to have the heater installed, and they in turn were shipped to New Jersey for further shipment to purchasers on QVC.

The two-day "on air" sale resulted in 28,000 being sold all over the United States with some to Canada, Puerto Rico and Hawaii.

The original intent was to invade the United States with bed bugs capable of reproducing at an alarming rate, and eventually bringing the retail industry to a standstill. At this point, they are right on schedule, many retailers are closing, more will, on the eve of the most productive selling time of the year.

Amed stated, "We will eliminate the infidels, one little bite at a time."

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