Should my 6 year old go to kindergarten or 1st grade?

I was told that my 5 year old was not ready for kindergarten last year after kicking and punching his teacher until she let go of him. He had been at home with his father for the previous 5 years he was hit by a car while walking and could not work. So needless to say he has been spoiled rotten as he is the youngest of 6 kids. The youngest being him at 6years old and the oldest being 25 years old, he is his fathers baby. So now I don't know if I should sent him to kindergarten or 1st grade. His birthday is at the beginning of December so he will be older than most of the kids in his class if he goes to kindergarten. He was also tested and is ADHD I also am ADD so I don't know how much of that plays into all of this. He also is very mean to other children but if he is by him self he is a perfect child. Please I don't want my kid to end up in prison and with his anger and lack of obeying authority I am afraid of that. My other children beg me to take him somewhere else. PLEASE HELP!!

What the Expert Says:

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From everything you have mentioned about your son's behavior, it sounds as though he would be better served by starting school in Kindergarten. In Kindergarten, social skills such as waiting turns, manners, sharing and respecting authority are taught to the children along with the regular academic subjects. Especially if your child has never attended preschool, Kindergarten would be a much better preparation for him to adjust to being in school all day with other children.

Since your child has been tested for ADHD, it is important for you to follow through with your pediatrician and your child's therapist to get him on the right treatment plan, which may include medication for when he is at school. You will always need to work closely with your child's teachers. Many children with ADHD are given an Individual Education Plan or IEP by his teachers, psychologist or school counselor. The IEP ensures that your child meets the goals which are set for him, and you as a parent will be involved in this process.

Do not worry about your son being one of the oldest children in his class. It is always better to err on the side of your child being one of the older ones, rather than being one of the youngest. Boys especially benefit from having an extra year of maturity. It is not uncommon to see 18 and 19 year olds graduating from high school. In today's world and all of the pressures teens have to face, it makes sense to hold a child back rather than push him ahead, especially when they have a learning disability or other behavioral issues.

If you would like to talk more about this issue or any other parenting concerns, please call our toll-free Hotline. Our crisis counselors are available 24 hours every day to assist parents and kids of all ages.