Sunday, December 23, 2007

It is so easy to get caught up in the day to day occurences in our lives and especially this time of year - - we rush to find just the right present or to meet all of the items on the list. Even those that made it very last minute. So many times I encounter people and I wonder if they truly remember what it is to celebrate Christmas. If they remember why it exists, why we give gifts. I can't speak for other people, but I can say with great clarity that Christmas is more than just a day to see the twinkle in my girl's eyes in the morning, the excitement when they do find that gift they wanted tucked under the tree, or the table filled with wonderful food and family.

It is a day that represents who I am called to be, the road I have chosen to follow. A gratitude that is immeasurable and a respect that is deserved above all others. The knowledge that on this day a baby was born. A defenseless child, whose life was predetermined. I think to Soph's birth. We worked so hard to ensure that she stayed with us, to make sure that we did not lose her after her birth. I prayed so hard that I would get to see her grow, to help her on her path - - I sat by her incubator just staring and dreaming of her future; school, baking cookies, dolls, her wedding, grandkids - all of it. I had great hopes even then. How painful it would have been for me, if I did all of those things knowing that her destiny was to die. To die early, to be ridiculed, tortured, and betrayed in the most intimate of ways. To know that she would die for people that were not deserving, for people who were not grateful - who would not remember or care to know what her purpose was. I would have been angry from day one. I would want to shout from the highest mountains, I would hold so much contempt for those in the world and yet - God still delivered this child, his son to us - to die for us - knowing that his son would die on a cross, would hang in pain and anguish - and that his people would forget, would not care. He delivered a savior that to this day some people have no respect for. And yet, he is not angry, he holds each of us in his palm, he welcomes us without question. How is it possible? It is too large a task for me to understand.

What I can understand is that on the one day each year that almost all people celebrate, there should be a moment reserved in the morning before opening packages to recognize why they are there, there should be an extra setting at the table, and without a doubt hearts should be open and grateful - we have been washed white because of that teeny babe in a manger. There is no question whose day it is - - - - -

Rejoice! Rejoice! For unto us a savior is born!Happy Birthday Emmanuel!

Friday, December 7, 2007

I was sure by now That You would have reached down And wiped our tears away stepped in and saved the day but once again, I say "Amen," and it's still raining

And as the thunder rolls I barely hear you whisper through the rain "I'm with you" And as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God who gives And takes away

And I'll Praise you in this storm And I will lift my hands For You are who You are No matter where I am Every tear I've cried You hold in your hand You never left my side And though my heart is torn I will Praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind You heard my cry You raised me up again My strength is almost gone How can I carry on If I can't Find you

And as the thunder rolls I barely hear you whisper through the rain "I'm with you" And as Your mercy falls I raise my hands and praise the God that gives And takes away

And I'll Praise you in this storm And I will lift my hands For You are who You are No matter where I am And every tear I've cried You hold in your hand You never left my side And though my heart is torn I will Praise You in this storm

I lift my eyes unto the hills Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord The maker of Heaven and Earth

I lift my eyes unto the hills Where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord The maker of Heaven and Earth

And I'll Praise you in this storm And I will lift my hands For You are who You are No matter where I am And every tear I've cried You hold in your hand You never left my side And though my heart is torn I will Praise You in this storm

Monday, December 3, 2007

Today was a very chaotic day, just one in a mix of many, but something really small and simple took place during it that just made me stop and pay attention.

Bella and I were going over questions from one of her books in the living room. Sophie was climbing in and out of her chair and at one point, pulled her chair so that it was immediately next to the couch. As Bella and I talked, I could see Soph in the background, she climbed onto the side of her chair, reached for the arm of the couch, pulled herself up and over to leap onto the seat of the couch. Instantly, she threw her hands up and yelled "Sophie did it!". She was so thrilled....my mouth dropped. She has just begun saying her name, but not with any real emphasis, just simply "Sophie Gace" (as she says-too cute).

But today I could just see the look of pride on her face. She was so thrilled that she accomplished a great feat - what must have seemed to my tiny toddler, a mountain!

Bella and I just stood with grins on our faces, as Sophie dropped her hands and began clapping with sincere enthusiasm. We put down the books, directed our attention to her and asked for another show. She obliged with a fantastic energy and managed a second time with a daring roll to finish it off. My sweet Sophie Grace makes things look so easy; she sees something she wants to do and attacks it, no cares, trying over and over until she gets it right. No questioning how well it will go, how clean cut it is, whether it was done with all eyes watching, or to what extent she needed to think about it - she took a leap of Faith and believed without question in herself - she closed her eyes, smiled fiercly and attacked the challenge, head on - Sweet Sophie Grace did it!