Is this a slippery slope?

Yesterday I realised by chance that dh uses tumblr and pinterest to look at "tasteful" erotic pictures - I guess that's kind of ok, but then I also saw that he had contacted two female pinners, sending them private messages complimenting them on their boards and "good eye", and asking one where she lived.... I'm not sure what to make of this?

I would talk, and as soon as possible, as hard as that is. His reaction and response will help you decide what to do next.

But most of all: trust your gut. So many of us cut ourselves off from this incredibly valuable resource - or let others cut us off from it with their words. Notice how you feel and be inclined to trust it.

No matter what he says, or doesn't say, go with your gut response, which kind of lies underneath any surface emotions you might be feeling (in other words, your gut response will not be fear-, anxiety- or rage-driven). It will be a clear statement or instruction. Does that make more sense?

Do you really want to continue sharing a bed with a sad sack who's fantasising about getting his leg over with much younger women and who has resorted to using an alleged shared taste for erotica in the hope that he'll get lucky?

I suggest you check out what else he's been looking at and then check out of this marriage before he does.

Of course there was going to be far more than 'tasteful' erotica and the fact that it's stored on a phone your ds plays with suggests he's a porn addict. I wonder what a search of his computer history would show up?

If he attacks you for invading his privacy, tell him you'll set the thought police onto him and you'll be applying brain bleach by way of a divorce petition which will erase him and his unsavoury habits from your life.

Why should he assume it's who he thinks it is on the other end of the internet? What an idiot.

How did you arrive at the "tasteful" label. Did he tell you that?

I cant remember who says it, but some global health/diet movement believe that all our body and soul messages come from the colon. I think its south east asia or similar. Trust your gut is the unrefined Western way of arriving at the same result. So I was told.

I'm living this at the moment. First found out he did stuff like this 5 year's ago. He promised to stop and I think he did for a while. We had a child and I discovered whilst pregnant he was at it again. I made him leave but caved in and allowed him back after he convinced me it would never happen again. Just recently I found him doing something similar. This time I haven't got the energy to shout. I'm exhausted with a baby, full time job and I'm done trying to reason with him. He's ruined my confidence, It's effected my physical and mental health. He's still here thinking everything's ok. I juat haven't the energy for a show down right now.

So in answer to your question. Yes I do believe it's a slippery slope. There's a level of disrespect to do this in the first place. My fella was just more careful about hiding it

Regarding privacy invasion, you could say that you were so shocked by his contacting women over the internet you wanted to know the extent of his sleazy behaviour which as his wife is obviously important for you to know.