I Called It

Last September 14, I posted “Impeach the Pope.” Last year he said he was “deeply
ashamed” for the misconduct of American priests for sexual
intrigues with children and other disgraceful behavior.

Now it's hit home. In the diocese (or is it disease?) of Regensburg, Germany, his own
brother, Rev. Georg Ratzinger, has been accused of sexual and
physical abuse of choir boys under his tutelage. Think of it, this
sick old pervert betrayed his priestly vows by sucking the pipicitos
(you can figure this one out even if you don't speak Spanish) of kids
not mature enough to shave.

Needless to say, this behavior is not in the spirit of Christ, and Vatican officials
are whispering in their mystical naves for the Holy Father to step
down. In other words, “Impeach the Pope.”

But it is the latter part of my follow-up post that's important. The pope can't
just say “I'm sorry,” as Cardinal Angelo Sardano did referring to
the torture and murder of countless scientists and intellectuals at
the dawn of the Renaissance. See “Arrest the Pope.”

I was taught in Catholic high school about atonement. God digs it. Let's see what
the church could possibly do to make up for the suffering, ignorance
and misery it has foisted on humanity through close-mindedness and
wishful thinking.

One answer: sell the gold, art and real estate the church has amassed and hoarded from
poor people, and use the money to assuage human suffering. Millions
are starving (partly because of the church's anti-birth control
intransigence), millions live in shacks, countless others live short,
laborious lives, due to squalid conditions and lack of hope of
bettering themselves.

So c'mon Ben. Do the right thing. One golden chalice could feed a Mexican village for
months. One outstretched, hand-held, gold crucifix (you know, the
kind the Incas called “the little man on a stick”) could build a
water purification plant is Sub-Saharan Africa. A few Michelangelos
and a myriad of birth control clinics—one on every block— could
turn Haiti into a dream-vacation island.

The question is: what good is all the untold wealth doing squirreled away in Vatican
vaults when so many people are in desperate need?

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Quite so, Earthling. Did you read about the atrocities the church committed throughout history? The church made the Nazis look philanthropic—the account in Malawi, eight million tortured and burned at the stake (mostly women) for being possessed, scientific ideas and learning suppressed, overpopulation threatening the entire planet.

This is to say nothing about Catholic priest role models

There has to be some weird benefit that keeps them believing and going to church.

My Polish re-formed Catholic friend was totally unsurprised when I told him about this. His grandparents were in the death camps with the late Pope, and good friends with him, and my friend had respect for him, but when Ratburger became Pope, my Polish bro' called him a Nazi.

Tom, I know my idea doesn't have a snowball's chance. But what's interesting is that a pot-smoking hippie has the moral upper hand over the pope. He could use church money to assuage suffering. What good is it doing anybody in vaults?

Also, a birth control clinic on every block is a pretty sensible idea in multiple third-world countries. Instead, he's worried about priests playing around with boys.

Thanks, Rusty. I forgot about God's plan. Looks like a plan that Sarah Palin came up with.

From the church's perspective (most religions, not just Catholic) giving people money or enhancing their lives would be counter-productive to making them scorn this life and live for the afterlife. You'd never convince them to distribute their wealth with logic.