i don't see a problem with it. i mean in roma lore it is un-pure to dirty yourself with sex before being cleansed through marriage but i think the time for superstition is over and i see sex before marriage just as another progression

maybe its not wrong but after that it can be cosideret as mistake <just like in my case> i regret that i do it with wrong person but in the end its not bad thing if its ok with you and your partner and in my opinion it doesnt matter if its a guy or girl.

I'd rather that my future wife wasn't sleeping around with anyone else before me, and there's a higher probability that my future wife wouldn't have wanted me to be sleeping around with anyone else before her either.

In a way, it's like we were already cheating on each other before we even got married. I don't know about you, but I prefer to be known as a loyal and faithful person (it's a good character trait to be known for, i.e, helps in landing a good career job and such ).

For those who will say "But what if that person you're having pre-marital sex with is going to be your wife?" Well, you never really know that until you're actually married.

As for having sex just with the person you love, that may be tinted with a bit of idealism. "Love" is such an ambiguous term that is subject to each individual's relative definition of the word. But for argument's sake, let's say love is that warm fuzzy feeling you have towards someone that you are attracted to. My problem with feelings/emotions is that their fluctuation rate is so high, so they are not normally a good indicator of what you really want/need.

For me, sex is the ultimate act of intimacy between a man and a woman in a healthy relationship. It should be reserved for the context of a relationship that has both love AND commitment. In the long run, love without commitment is shallow and incredibly unstable, while commitment without love is extremely painful and demoralizing (and who the hell would want to have sex considering the long term repercussions of either of those scenarios?). So if you do have both commitment AND love, then why not just get married? Those two are the biggest ingredients to a successful marriage anyway.

As for "what if she (or he, for the ladies out there) sucks in bed?"

Well, if neither of you slept with anyone else beforehand, then you wouldn't have anyone to compare them to anyway

-S1126

p.s. yes, I'm incredibly traditional, I know. Nothing wrong with the way many things were done in the past. So in the hopefully rare case that someone wants to flame my post, go back and read the first line of my entry :P

I'd rather that my future wife wasn't sleeping around with anyone else before me, and there's a higher probability that my future wife wouldn't have wanted me to be sleeping around with anyone else before her either.

In a way, it's like we were already cheating on each other before we even got married. I don't know about you, but I prefer to be known as a loyal and faithful person (it's a good character trait to be known for, i.e, helps in landing a good career job and such ).

For those who will say "But what if that person you're having pre-marital sex with is going to be your wife?" Well, you never really know that until you're actually married.

As for having sex just with the person you love, that may be tinted with a bit of idealism. "Love" is such an ambiguous term that is subject to each individual's relative definition of the word. But for argument's sake, let's say love is that warm fuzzy feeling you have towards someone that you are attracted to. My problem with feelings/emotions is that their fluctuation rate is so high, so they are not normally a good indicator of what you really want/need.

For me, sex is the ultimate act of intimacy between a man and a woman in a healthy relationship. It should be reserved for the context of a relationship that has both love AND commitment. In the long run, love without commitment is shallow and incredibly unstable, while commitment without love is extremely painful and demoralizing (and who the hell would want to have sex considering the long term repercussions of either of those scenarios?). So if you do have both commitment AND love, then why not just get married? Those two are the biggest ingredients to a successful marriage anyway.

As for "what if she (or he, for the ladies out there) sucks in bed?"

Well, if neither of you slept with anyone else beforehand, then you wouldn't have anyone to compare them to anyway

-S1126

p.s. yes, I'm incredibly traditional, I know. Nothing wrong with the way many things were done in the past. So in the hopefully rare case that someone wants to flame my post, go back and read the first line of my entry :P

definitely marriage first. you want to save yourself for the one you truly love. not for some high school football star that'll break up with you after or because you just want to see have pleasure for an hour. it ruins your life

i know. tempting to just do it. well if you were raised right, think about it. there is a high risk of getting STD and then having to explain it to your blouse...not a good situation. and then a baby. if you're not mature enough for abstinence, do you think you're mature enough for a baby?!

besides, it's not really okay for guys to do it anyways. it's just that for the girl, it holds more responsibility since they're the ones holding the baby. also, you could tell if the girl is not a virgin just by physical appearance. the boy..i don't think that's possible