12.9.15

Dogs can be
so naughty sometimes. Combine the behavior with their curiosity and playful
natures and it means dog shaming photos are here to stay! That's a good thing
because naughty dogs make us laugh and these 14 are great!

5.9.15

1. He doesn’t have a face

“My son from the age of three always tells me about the ‘creeper man’
who lives in my mom and dad’s bedroom. He brings it up after he visits
them. I made the mistake once of asking what he looks like. My son said
‘Oh, he doesn’t have a face.'”

2. “You’ll get used to killing”

“A parent of one of my students told us in a meeting that she was
concerned because her son (7 years old) talked about an invisible ghost
who would talk to him and play with him in his room. He said the ghost
was called The Captain and was an old white guy with a beard. The kid
would tell his mom that The Captain told him when he grows up his job
will be to kill people, and The Captain would tell him who needed to be
killed. The kid would cry and say he doesn’t want to kill when he grows
up, but The Captain tells him he doesn’t have a choice and he’ll get
used to killing after a while.”

3. Little girl ghost

“When my daughter was three she had an imaginary friend named Kelly
who lived in her closet. Kelly sat in a little rocking chair while she
slept, played with her, etc. Typical imaginary friend shit. Anyway, fast
forward two years later, the wife and I are watching the new Amityville Horror
(the one with Ryan Renolds) and our daughter walks out right when the
dead girl goes all black eyed. Far from being disturbed she said ‘That
looks like Kelly.’ ‘Kelly who?’ we say. ‘You know the dead girl that
lived in my closet.'”

4. Bad rabbit

“My cousin, when she was 5, and I was 17, had a stuffed rabbit that
she talked to and carried everywhere. One day she was asleep on the
couch while I was watching her, and she woke up and started yelling at
her rabbit for no reason. One minute she was knocked out, the next,
she’s awake, glaring at her rabbit, yelling, ‘No! You can’t do that!
That’s bad! Don’t do it!’ I asked her what was wrong, tried to get her
to stop, but she wouldn’t listen. I finally just took the rabbit up to
her room, and when I came back down she was asleep on the couch again.
Fuck whatever that rabbit was planning on doing.”

5. Roger won’t be around anymore…

“My little brother’s imaginary friend, Roger, lived under our coffee
table. Roger had a wife and nine kids. Roger and his family lived
peacefully alongside us for three years. One day, my little brother
announced that Roger wouldn’t be around anymore, since he shot and
killed him and his whole family. I don’t know if he remembers any of
this, but his genuine lack of remorse was very disturbing.”

6. A boy in the tree

“My folks’ farm surrounds a cemetery, and my dad and my niece were
walking down there. My niece (4) looks up and says, ‘What’s that boy
doing up in that tree?’ There was no boy, but she insisted there was and
could describe him.”

7. The bunny man

“When I was 16, I babysat twins who were in the third grade at the
time. They always spoke of a man in an Easter Bunny costume, and they
were terrified of him. One day I was babysitting, and one twin was in
the shower. His brother and I were sitting downstairs watching
television when all of the sudden, he said, ‘You need to go check on
Matt.’ Seconds later, Matt yelled, ‘He’s in here!!! He’s in here!!!’ I
ran upstairs, and I had to check every room before he would calm down.
I’m not sure which part of the experience freaked me out the most.”

8. Poor Shaggy

When my mom was younger she had an imaginary friend named Shaggy.
When she was finished with Shaggy, she ‘chopped him up and put him in
the fridge.'”

9. “Smash Daddy’s head”

“When my brother was just learning how to talk he grabbed one of
those small toy hammers and crawled onto the sofa where my dad was
sleeping. He then leant in close and whispered one of his first
sentences… ‘Smash daddy’s head’ right into his ear.”

10. Dark angels

When my brother was little he acted like he had angels talking to him
every second. One day my mom overheard him say, ‘I can’t kill him! He’s
my only dad!'”

11. “That’s the man”

“My daughter used to tell me about a man who came into her room every
night and put the sign of the cross on her forehead. I thought it was
just a dream. Then my mother-in-law sent over some family photos. My
daughter looked right at the picture of my husband’s father (who has
been dead for 16 years) and said ‘That’s the man who comes into my room
at night!’ My husband later told me his father would always do the sign
of the cross on his forehead when he was young.”

12. Message from beyond

“My wife and I overheard my two-year-old daughter on the baby monitor
wake up on Saturday morning and say, ‘What? OK I’ll tell her.’ She then
got up, came into our bedroom, and told my wife, ‘Mary says you’re
doing a good job.’ Mary was her grandmother that she was extremely close
to that passed away.”

13. I called him Spooky Guy

“As a kid, I said that my imaginary friend was a ghost. I called him
Spooky Guy and said he died in the garage of the house on the hill
behind ours. I even came up with his death. He was a 16 year old who got
in a car crash and walked to that house to ask to use their phone (died
in the 70’s). The person lived there grabbed him and sexually abused
him there and killed him. He was my imaginary friend as far back as I
can remember. This scared my mom so much that she tried to look up
records to see if that happened and got me a therapist.”

14. Icy wants me to tell you it will be tonight

“In high school one of my best friends had a little sister who was
five or six years old. One day we stopped by his place, completely high,
because he needed to get his Magic cards. While waiting for him to come
downstairs his sister came up to me and said, ‘Icy told me to ask you
if you know when you’re going to die.'”
I laughed nervously: morbid question, right? But I knew all about
Icy, her imaginary friend. I even helped her draw a picture of him once.
So I played along and said, ‘No, of course not! No one knows that.
Hopefully when I’m very old.’
The girl shook her head sadly and said, ‘No, Icy wants me to tell you it’ll be tonight.’ And with that, she just walked away.”

15. It is the punishment

“I was seventeen and babysitting a friend of the family’s
six-year-old boy. He’d been in bed a couple of hours and I just peeked
in to check on him. He wasn’t in the bed and when I opened the door,
I saw he was standing in the corner, facing the wall. creepiest fucking
thing ever. I asked him what he was doing and all he did was turn
around, smile, and put his finger to his lips as if to say ‘shhh.’ I
asked him again what he was doing and all he says is, ‘Leave us. It is
the punishment.'”

16. Keep kicking

“My grandfather had a camp on Lake Dering in New Hampshire when I was
a kid. One day when I was 6 or so, I fell off of the dock and into the
water. I couldn’t swim. While under, I distinctly remember seeing a
little girl down there who told me to look up towards the sun and just
keep kicking and I’d be fine. I swam to the surface just in time for my
grandfather to swoop me up and pull me back on the dock.”

17. Nope

“When my boy was 4, his imaginary friend would sit in the corner of
the room when you switched off the lights and light the room with red
glowing eyes.”

18. They were both dead

“Kid I used to babysit had imaginary friends. They were dead. One had
no head. One was an old lady. They were both bloody. The one with no
head had insides sticking out of his neck.
I didn’t ask him questions about them because fuck that.”

19. Tracy

“When my niece was about 4 she had an imaginary friend, which I don’t
remember the name of. She would blame things she did on this imaginary
friend but also talked about how this friend would watch Scooby Doo with
her. One day I thought, ‘Why don’t I find out more about this friend?’
So I asked her to tell me about her friend. And she said, ‘She’s a she
and she’s dead.’ And I said, ‘Does she have a job?’ And she said, ‘She
does what my daddy does!’ Which is that her imaginary friend was a cop.
So then I said, ‘Where is your imaginary friend a police woman at?’ And
she said, ‘Right next I to where my daddy is a policeman.’ But then she
said, ‘I met her when I was in my mummy’s belly. She touched it when I
was inside.’
A few months before my niece was born my cousin Tracy had died. She
was hit by a train. She loved watching Scooby Doo and had a ton of
memorabilia. She was also a cop. She was a cop in the town that is right
next to the one my brother-in-law is a cop in, my niece’s ‘daddy.’ My
niece’s imaginary friend was my dead cousin. There is no other way she
could have known all that at the age of 4.”

20. “That’s why I don’t like water now”

“When my kid was 4, we were watching a documentary on the Titanic.
The scene was a picture of the schematics of the boiler room and the
camera panned from left to right over the plans. He pointed at the
TV and said, ‘That’s wrong. The boilers were on the other side. And I
was right here.’ And he pointed to a small space in the boiler room.
‘That’s where I was. And that’s why I don’t like water now.'”

21. Emily

“When my sister was probably about 6 or 7, she had an imaginary
friend named Emily. She told us Emily lived in her closet, wore an old
black dress, and had long dark hair and she was the same age as my
sister. My sister played with Emily constantly. My parents started
noticing my sister acting weird. Just sitting in the middle of her room
whispering to Emily quite a bit and acting a lot more distant towards
them. I remember a very specific day, my brother was walking by her room
and my sister was sitting in the middle of her room….but she turned
around and hissed at him. He was scared shitless. He told me it didn’t
even look like my sister. My parents ran up to her room and I could hear
my sister just screaming and screaming.”
“I have no idea what happened in that room but I ran to the bottom of
my stairs and the screaming stopped, I saw my parents holding my sister
crying their eyes out, she was sobbing as well. I’ve asked her about it
today. She’s 24 now. She told me that Emily used to tell her to do
horrible things to herself. She actually used to wake up on the roof and
not remember how she got there. I’m not kidding. Apparently Emily
absolutely hated my parents so she turned my sister against them. She
hates talking about it so I never brought up that specific night. This
all happened at my old house. When we moved into a different house,
Emily was gone. I’m not making any of this up. My sisters little friend
was a really big deal to my family and messed things up for a long time.
I’m just relieved we left that house.”

22. She floated above his bed at night

“When my younger brother was around 4, he had an imaginary friend
named Victoria Meadowbrooke. He told us that she was the prettiest girl
ever and she floated above his bed a night.”