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Why have you come? Is it to steal my riches? - or perhaps you seek to righteously punish me for my affront to your morality. It matters little, for you will do neither. Before I dispose of you in some horribly gruesome manner perhaps I should introduce myself. I am known as Davaeorn; I would ask you for your names but I care little to become acquainted with the dead. - Daveorn

Whenever I smell asphalt, I think of Maureen. That's the last sensation I had before I blacked out: The thick smell of asphalt. And first thing I saw when I woke up, was her face. She said she'd fix my bike, free, no strings attached. I should have known then that things were never that simple. Yeah, when I think of Maureen I think of two things: Asphalt, and trouble.

Emissary Tar: "At last, someone who looks like they could be of some assistance! The assorted boobs and dimwits around here have been of very little help."Player Character: "I'm afraid you have mistaken us for someone else. I'm Dimwit, this is my good friend Boob, and behind me you'll find Brainless and Moron. How do you do?"

Guard: "The entrance tax is 6 gold pieces for each party of travellers. Please announce your point of origin."Player Character: "The mystical land of frolicking naked nymphs, where your every desire is granted by bald blubbering bugbears. Hee! Hee!"

Madman: "You want Yakman to sleep? Yakman never sleep!" Player Character: "You never sleep? You must sleep. If you didn't sleep, it would drive you... oh."

Enna Hendrick: "Shoo! Them aren't yer chickens! Erlin! Erlin, someone's after the chickens!"Player Character: "This is between us and the chickens, Ma'am, and I'm going to ask real nicely that you stay out of it."

American sniper: "Heart or head, either way, Jerry's dead."
Same: "Boogie man on the move."
German Tiger: "Zey are scratching your paintjob, Helmut."
Same: "Jah, two inches of Russian steel still between my ribs."

The funny ones:
American Machine Gun crew: "Then don't lead them so damn much!"
American Rifle squad (piling into a building): "No stealing doilies this time Johnson!"
German Volks squad: "New MP-40s issued, children. Try not to shoot each other."
British Cromwell tank (stop poking me): "Gunner! Aim the turret at the giant camera in the sky!"
German King Tigerr: "You know, some people think we're compensating for something."
German Grenadiers: "Panzerschreck! Time for us to un-pimp zeir ride!
American Rangers: "I hear all the Nazis are 8 feet tall!"
German Volks: "You think all the Yankees are 10 feet tall? Let's find out."

Dawn of War series:
Harlequin: "Let your enemies fear, for a Harlequin of the Laughing God dances at your side."
Farseer: "If you ever want to see peace again, make war now with all your heart!"
Commissar Lord: "Be like General Tarsis of yore! Bulletproof and free of fear!"
Same: ""We are the dukes of our destinies, bestowed victory by our Emperor!"
Catachams: "This is what I call a target rich environment."
Same: "Take from them EVERYTHING!"