We have reached peak road rage

Miami drivers are so mad at life that the Miami Herald did an entire investigation into what is behind all of this rage. Videos of unhinged drivers taking their grievances to the streets circulate the internet. Like Hector and Jairo, who stopped traffic in Hialeah so they could try and beat each other with a bat over “Why didn’t you let me in?”

You cannot make us use turn signals

Two cars use their turn signals to indicate they want to make a turn. But that other guy couldn’t be bothered, obviously.Roberto Koltun rkoltun@miamiherald.com

The Miami Herald reported that failure to use turn signals results in 2 million collisions annually in the U.S., according to research by the Society of Automotive Engineers. Based on our analysis, all 2 million of those collisions take place in Miami, where no one knows what that little stick popping out of the steering wheel is really about. The reasons we don’t use turn signals are a mystery, but here are a few theories:

Macho men don’t use turn signals.

People are too distracted to drive like they have sense.

Getting a driver’s license in the United States is too damn easy.

Police don’t stop jerks for not signalling.

The silver lining? Eventually self-driving cars will take over the streets and our crappy driving habits will no longer matter.

We continue to turn on our hazard lights when it's raining

Local police are tired of telling you. So let’s get an explanation from an eloquent redditor named CraftyFellow_

It is illegal to drive with your hazard lights on in the State of Florida. No matter how hard it is raining.

It also dangerous. Your turn signals become useless (not like you people were using them anyway) and it makes it hard to tell the difference between someone that is actually pulled over and using their lights appropriately.

Stop it. And give your friends and family shit for it if you see them doing it.

We use our high beams at the wrong times

We are all scared that Jason could be around the corner, but your high beams won’t stop his murderous rampage.

Yeah, we know it’s dark and creepy in Pinecrest and Palmetto Bay and all these other suburban towns with no street lights. Jason Voorhees could jump out from behind a tree at any moment and make you crash that Hummer into some bushes. But now you are driving right toward me, and I can’t see a damn thing. So basically he’s going to get both of us.