Friday, December 10, 2010

reverb 9 & 10 - Mind the Gap

The year 2008 was the year of the party. I can think of three off the top of my head that were off the charts amazing. Each hosted at my then apartment, which was conducive to loud music, and filled with fabulous people dancing and having a great time. Among those three there might have been: themes, a massive game of random create-your-own twister, and people drawing on the walls (ok, so there was paper on them too).

2009 worked hard to keep up, coming in at a close second with a last minute surge, thanks to a ridiculously fun night out of birthday dancing and a Christmas Eve pajama party.

2010 comes in last with, an A for effort, and a participatory ribbon. It was definitely full of potential: the most beautiful outdoor, island wedding ever, and a joint birthday (one being mine) with a Jersey Shore costume theme. Now, keep in mind that this was also the year of (big echo) The Breakdown. As such, I have become very aware of the anxiety or disconnect that has been impacting me in social settings for many years.

Now here's where the wisdom comes in. Now that I recognize this, I can make conscious preparations so that I can navigate my way through these gatherings with more ease. (Instead of trying to break up with an incredible man at the most beautiful wedding of the year, and then hiding out in our suite for the rest of the night. doh!) If I'm a guest I try know as much as I can about the event, and my exit strategies, before heading into it. If I'm hosting, it's all about managing my perceptions - experiencing things as they happen, not how I predict they will.

And occasionally it means chosing not to go, even it was an invitation I already accepted. The times I did were some of the wisest decisions I made this year. And a bit of a novelty too. Letting go of expectations, and the big old FOMO (fear of missing out) took a shift of mind - putting myself first. It saved me a lot of energy when I was really needing it.

The creative problem solving had to kick in at some point too, right? To bolster up my lacking social time, since not wanting to sit and watch people eat and drink seriously put a dent in it, I started an arts and crafts night with some of the friends I don't see enough. Once a month we get together at one of our cozy homes, and catch up and connect over glue and scissors :) It may not be dancing to the wee hours, but it fills my soul. 2010 gets an honourable mention for that!

Card made from a collage created at the first Arts & Crafts night in October

9 comments:

Awesome! Awesome! And more Awesome! And I gotta give you props for getting ME to dress up for the Jersey Shore party. What fun! I almost wrote about that last night...but went with the wedding instead. lol

I think you are very wise, very brave, very resourceful and very resilient.

Knowing that YOU matter, applying creativity to ensuring that things that make your heart sing don't disappear with the changes you're making, starting over and facing forward ~ so inspiring, all of it.

I too loved the pairing of these two prompts and your writing style is lovely too.

OH BOY I am number 10!! how cool is that!! thanks for coming by to visit! I hope you get some wardrobe ideas.. and if not you can always email me, If I can help in any way let me know... I started shaking up my wardrobe by visiting blogs and getting ideas..then heck, I started my own!! has been totally fun. AND I see you are into photography too... I will have to learn as much as I can from you, thats the part I am having the most fun with, is the camera!!!