breast cancer … the good, the bad and the ugly

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Skinny Girl Diaries. #7 why is this so hard???

If you’ve been reading my blog you know that I can only fit into my fat jeans and have been trying to lose weight for a few months now. Granted I have a legitimate excuse for struggling with losing a few pounds but I am starting to get a little frustrated. There are so many obstacles. The new one is my heating is not working and the technician is unreliable so I’ve spent hours this week sitting at home waiting for him to come and then he cancels!! Today I spent the entire day doing nothing! Why? Because I woke up too early and after a few hours was tired. The repair man was supposed to come between 2-3 so I thought “can’t take a nap now he will be here soon”. I stayed awake waiting but was so tired I didn’t have the energy to do anything. I wasted the entire afternoon waiting and finally after I told my landlord I’d be calling someone else she had him come right away. It was now 7pm! After all of the aggravation I went through this week I thought it was finally over. WRONG! He had the wrong part. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Since tomorrow is Sunday he said he’d have the part Monday and come back then. I finally stopped being frustrated, told him to call me directly instead of my landlord. Hopefully I will have my heat back Monday. It’s been -20 degrees C this past week and I’m using a portable heater SO my kitchen is extremely cold! I eat dinner late so I’m in the kitchen in the evening and it’s so cold I do not want to cook at all! Daytime is fine as I have lots of sunlight coming in so it isn’t too cold. Tomorrow I will try to prepare all my food earlier. I also HAVE to workout tomorrow. You’d think I’d be losing weight eating 1400-1500 calories a day but when you’re not active that’s not enough. Right now I’m home most of the time being inactive.

I really want to be back to my pre-cancer weight before I go on my trip. That gives me almost 6 months. All I have to do is lose 2 pounds each month. I can do that, it can’t be that hard. And February was better, I noticed some improvement in my energy level. I can do this, I can do this! I’m going to do this.