Whither England?

It’s all jolly good fun, isn’t it? Who would have thought we could be discussing the thrills of using water cannon, rubber bullets, tasers and automatic rifles on English streets in August? I wonder when thoughts will turn to artillery and Apaches? Tornadoes, maybe? Not to mention land mines in the Old Kent Road and road-blocks on the M6. Those of us who have long pondered on what it would take to wake the English up have had our answer.

But, when all the prisons and hospitals are full, and the schools are empty – and the smoke clears at last, what then? When the war is won, what grand plans do our bath-chair generals have to win the peace?

Where will they draw their examples from? Do we expect any serious replies from them? Dare we expect any credible plans from them? For there has to be a plan, doesn’t there? You can’t just forge a battlefield and then walk away when the game’s over ; how terribly mediaeval.

Perhaps we should have a special section, alongside the Creative Writing slot, devoted to Conservative Ideas for Meritorious Peace in our Land Evermore (CIMPLE). How many real Tories remain on MyT? Let’s find out.