Wanted: Parents willing to foster, adopt

Kathy Weatherwax holds her 6-month-old foster son inside the nursery of their Rancho Santa Margarita home. GREG ANDERSEN, FOR THE REGISTER

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Kathy Weatherwax holds her 6-month-old foster son inside the nursery of their Rancho Santa Margarita home. GREG ANDERSEN, FOR THE REGISTER

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Susan Eckermann plays with her adopted son, who is 3, near her South Orange County home. CHAS METIVIER, FOR THE REGISTER

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Blake tells his mom Susan a tall story about a bike riding adventure as she listens closely. Susan Eckermann adopted son Blake, 3, through the Orange County adoption system. CHAS METIVIER, FOR THE REGISTER

For more information

To learn more about becoming a foster or adoptive family, call the Orange County Social Services Agency's toll-free number 888-871-KIDS (5437) and register for orientation and/or pre-licensing classes.

On the floor of her living room, Kathy Weatherwax, 50, wrapped her 6-month-old foster son in blankets and cradled his fragile body, making sure not to touch the cables and tubes connecting him to his oxygen supply and a finger pulse oximeter.

The baby breathed and cried uncomfortably from issues with his lungs due to premature birth. The Rancho Santa Margarita woman monitored her foster son to make sure his lungs were not working too hard and that he was getting enough oxygen.

Soon, his crying ceased. Weatherwax placed the baby in his rocker and waited until he fell asleep.

“This is why I do it,” she said as she watched her foster son doze peacefully.

Weatherwax’s positive experience is something Orange County officials would like to repeat as they continually wrestle with a shortage of foster parents – as well as adoptive parents in some cases.

The foster mother of nearly 10 years said her home is a “special medical placement unit,” meaning she cares for an infant with medical needs for at least six months at a time until he or she finds a permanent home. Though Weatherwax is a registered nurse and her husband, Scott, is a doctor, she said parents who choose to care for these infants receive plenty of training and support from Orange County’s social services agency.

So far, this is the Weatherwaxes’ eighth time as long-term foster parents. They also adopted two of those children through the county social services office.

At first, Scott Weatherwax was not open to caring for infants with medical needs. He changed his mind in 2004 after doing the required training and classes.

“It turns out that medical skills aren’t as important as learning and caring from the heart, great faith in God…and lots of support and networking within the social services world,” Scott Weatherwax said.

Orange County Social Services officials say they need more foster and adoptive families like the Weatherwaxes who can meet its children’s diverse needs.

Terry Lynn Fisher, spokeswoman for the agency, said it has more children under its supervision than there are homes available.

The agency’s Children and Family Services division is seeking families to take children with unique needs such as sibling sets; children with special medical, physical, emotional or psychological needs; teens and children and teens who exhibit behavioral challenges.

“During the past six months, there were 14 children with special medical needs whose placements were delayed due to lack of placement options,” Fisher said. “These 14 children had a range of medical issues, most of them complex, some more severe than others.”

Fisher said some of those children were hospitalized until they found appropriate placements.

“The length of the delays varied, from a few days to five months,” she said.

While the range of the children’s needs extends beyond medical ones, Fisher said foster and adoptive families willing to meet the sometimes-complex needs of the children promote successful adoptive matches in the county, and prevent more children from the trauma of moving through multiple foster homes.

THE NEEDS OF O.C. CHILDREN

The number of waiting children and families fluctuates daily as children and youth enter or exit the dependency system and as cases move through the Juvenile Court process.

On Sept. 30, the social services agency had 21 children waiting for a possible permanent home: one special-developmental child, age 6; five children above 12 (three of them with behavioral and mental health “challenges”); and five sibling sets, four of them with children above 12.

“In general, the children who have special behavioral needs or challenges and struggle with mental health issues are the ones we find the most difficult to identify (for) an appropriate adoptive home,” said Shekoufeh Markel, adoptions program manager, in an email. “Many of these children are at least 9 years of age.”

At the end of both 2011 and 2012, more than 45 children were available for adoption in Orange County while the number of available families during both periods was fewer than 30.

Fisher said the economy was one reason for an increase in available children and a decrease in available families since 2009, explaining some birth parents could not afford to keep their children and that fewer foster and adoptive families were available.

Also, the California Fostering Connections to Success Act (Assembly Bill 12) starting last year allowed non-minor dependents to remain in foster care up to age 21 vs. the previous limit of 18. This increased the number of children and youth in out-of-home care, meaning not under the care of birth parents, by nearly 10 percent in the last year, Fisher said.

On top of the more than 45 children available for adoption at the end of 2011 and 2012, there are also children in long-term foster care. While this group includes youth not interested in adoption, such as older youth or youth placed with family members, some of those children wish to be adopted but have stronger behavioral, emotional, psychological and/or medical issues.

“These are the children or youth who would be adoption candidates if we had more families willing and able to adopt them,” Fisher said.

According to county data, the number of children in long-term foster care is declining. On the last day of 2012, there were 459 children in long-term foster care compared to 605 children on the last day of 2007.

Fisher said this is because the social services agency has developed programs and strategies over the past five to ten years that are preventing children from entering the dependency system or helping children reunify with their birth parents sooner. Examples of those strategies include linking families with resource centers and community groups; a parent-mentor program where parents that are new to the system are mentored by parents that have successfully reunified with their children, and encouraging father engagement.

THE SEARCH FOR PARENTS

Fisher said the lack of families looking to adopt or temporarily foster children and youth might also root from the cost of living in Orange County and the busy lifestyle that often comes with it.

Weatherwax said some local families are not aware there is a need for foster and adoptive parents close to home.

“They think you have to go out of the country or (through) private adoption because here in our nice little Orange County bubble, nothing ever is bad,” Weatherwax said.

In the meantime, the social services agency works with private and nonprofit licensed agencies in Orange County and Southern California to find homes for its children.

The county is also prioritizing reunification with relatives or non-related extended family members. More than 50 percent of the children who are removed from their parents in Orange County are placed with relatives or non-related extended family members.

Children and Family Services has a recruitment team to find potential foster and adoptive parents. Jim Deming, Children and Family Services supervisor said that lately, much of the team’s outreach has gone to people in the medical field and church groups.

Parents can be licensed as soon as all paperwork is submitted and background checks, home inspections and training classes are completed. Deming said most homes are licensed within 60-90 days, or up to 120 days if there are complications or improvements are required.

Agency officials stress that those wishing to adopt can do so sooner if they’re open to children of any age; or taking in those with medical or psychological needs.

“Parents often don’t know of the need,” Deming said. “If they come to the county, they have their own ideas of the kind of child they want to adopt. They need to keep their options open.”

WHAT CAN BE DONE?

Fisher said the social services agency has a program called Faith In Motion that recruits foster and adoptive families within the faith community and encourages faith-based congregations to develop support services for those families.

She said the agency is also working to educate the public about the needs of its children, particularly those whose development has been affected by trauma.

“The government steps in when we’re required to step in, but it’s not like when we step in it’s our problem,” Fisher said. “It’s a community problem.”

If parents don’t step forward to help these children now, the community may see the effects in these children later through increased incarceration, homelessness or criminal behavior, Fisher said.

“The bottom line is that strong, healthy communities are the result of strong, healthy families,” she said.

The agency regularly has adoption and foster care workshops to educate potential parents and caregivers. Information on those sessions can be found at oc4kids.com

Susan Eckermann, 52, had the adoption of her son, now 3, finalized in September 2012. The Laguna Niguel resident has fostered children since2009.

Eckermann was happy with her experiences as a foster parent that ultimately led to the adoption of her son, but said it was challenging for her to support family reunification as a foster parent. She said it is important for potential foster and adoptive parents to know the court system and its priorities for its children.

“Be cautiously optimistic… and be aware of the way the legal system works,” Eckermann said. “The goal of the system is reunification, not to give me a child to adopt.”

Regardless, Weatherwax said the rewards of fostering children surpass its difficulties.

Her advice for parents considering foster care or adoption? “Don’t say ‘no’ until you get the whole story,” of a child, she said.

“It’s all about them (the kids) and what I can do for them,” Weatherwax said. “Sometimes I have them for a day, and sometimes I have them forever, but in that amount of time, (I ask myself) ‘What can I give this child?’ ”

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