Times like these

Little J’s other nanny has been sick lately, so I’ve been taking care of him more than usual. Today he seemed to know that the schedule was off and he was fussy. He was also pretty tired, so after a diaper change, he went right down for a nap.

Sometimes he wakes himself up, but goes right back to sleep. This time, he woke himself up and bonked his head on the side of his crib. The poor little guy screamed and cried and wanted nothing other than to be held and soothed.

He loves music, so I turned on the stereo. He has lots of children’s music CDs, but his parents also have a Jack Johnson CD that I knew would be really soothing. I put it on and held him until he fell asleep in my arms.

I was afraid he would wake up again if I put him in his crib, so I just held him until I thought my arms were going to fall off. Then I sat down in a rocking chair and he slept on my chest while we rocked and listened to Jack Johnson.

Although I’m not a mom myself, as I sat there with sleepy little J, I thought about how I want to protect him because I know the kinds of things he will eventually find out about the world. There are lots of wonderful things he’ll discover as he grows up, but he will also learn that there are things like war and hunger and hateful words. There are plenty of things he will eventually worry about, from final exams to global warming.

I know everyone has to deal with these things, but I just wish he could always be as happy and carefree as he is right now. I look at him and wonder what he’ll do when he grows up. Will he play basketball? (He likes to jump.) Will he play the guitar? (He seems to like Jack Johnson). He’s less than a year old, but I wonder all these things about him – what kind of person he will grow up to be and what kind of world he will live in. What kind of world we are now shaping for him.

Perhaps I’m thinking about all this because death has been on my mind a little bit lately – some people I know have had loved ones pass recently, or have loved ones who are very sick. I think about death, but then I look at little J and am reminded that new lives are beginning all the time.

I’m reminded of what Al Gore said when he accepted the Nobel Peace Prize on Dec. 10:

The great Norwegian playwright, Henrik Ibsen, wrote, “One of these days, the younger generation will come knocking at my door.”

The future is knocking at our door right now. Make no mistake, the next generation will ask us one of two questions. Either they will ask: “What were you thinking; why didn’t you act?”

Or they will ask instead: “How did you find the moral courage to rise and successfully resolve a crisis that so many said was impossible to solve?”

We have everything we need to get started, save perhaps political will, but political will is a renewable resource.

So let us renew it, and say together: “We have a purpose. We are many. For this purpose we will rise, and we will act.”

When I first read that, I thought I was part of the “younger generation” that he was talking about. Now I realize I’m more than old enough to be included in the generation that bears the responsibility of making the world a safer, healthier, more sustainable place for the real younger generation – little J and his baby friends – to live.

People don’t agree on a lot of things. People may not believe climate change is real. People may not believe that modifying their lifestyles, even slightly, can make a difference. And certainly people may not agree on the “right” ways to go about doing that. But I think we should all be able to agree that the younger generation deserves more from us than petty arguments about the situation. Arguing turns action into inaction.

I feel discouraged when someone criticizes me. If I feel good about making a small, but positive, change in my life and someone criticizes it for not being “enough,” I lose that good feeling and lose a little bit of the drive to go further. Then again, I also get a little discouraged when someone thinks I’m being preachy or holier-than-thou when talking about “going green.” Then again, I realize that people are going criticize me either way – for going too far or not going far enough (and I’m not sure how I can do both, but apparently I have).

Anyway, the fact is that I’m relatively new at this whole “green” thing. I’m trying. And instead of worrying about going too far or not going far enough, I’m just going to relax and keep going… on and on and on and on, as Jack Johnson says.