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Sex Selling Food, part 1: Pomegranates

Inspired by Mark Bittman’s This #$!% Has Got to Stop, welcome to Sex Selling Food, a series featuring the worst examples of sex/women’s bodies being used to sell food and drink products.

POM Wonderful, with its curvaceous, bootylicious bottle, has always had a sexy bite in its marketing, but these new commercials seem closer to porn than food porn. Call it the Abercrombie effect. Scarcely clad models look woefully on, unfazed by the fact that their young, fit, hairless flesh is what consumers will be fixed on, not the product they are supposedly selling.

The most downright erotic of the 3-part series features an alluring Eve, whose FCC-unfriendly parts are just barely covered with thin leaves. She gazes at the bottle o’ temptation while the long, firm and oh-so-clearly phallic snake writhes up her curvy hips until he’s close enough to fleck his tongue on the underside of her jaw.

I’m sure Tina Fey would get cackle out of the fact that this Eve commercial played three times on Hulu while we were watching this week’s “30 Rock.”

POM is trying to hook women, too, with one commercial featuring a lust-worthy warrior whose invincibility and bronze body come from eating pomegranates.

We not only get solid nipple action in the product shot, but also an actor who, by the end, is standing in full-on, ready-to-thrust position.

By now, we’re all thinking the same thing, and it doesn’t have anything to do with that blood red juice.

Just watched an old navy commercial that played with the old stand by “getting hot for the gardener” game. Of course every gardener has rock hard abs and no shirt while blowing leaves everywhere in Fall! Really??? I must be living in the wrong neighborhoods my whole life cause never once have I seen “the hot gardener” No offense to gardeners of course. So where did this fantasy come from anyway? I guess it’s still going on because Old Navy thought it would be fun to use. So was it a sarcastic move on Old Navy or do we really still fantasize about our gardeners?