Iraqi government announces Iraqi troop withdrawal from Iraq

GREEN ZONE, IRAQ — Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki announced on Tuesday a shift in military strategy by the Iraqi government. Iraqi military troops are now in the process of being withdrawn from Iraq.

“Iraq has been caught up in a civil war ever since the U.S. government invaded,” said Prime Minister al-Maliki. “Anybody who collaborates with the U.S. generally gets killed – even in the Green Zone, now. This has been a disaster for our military troops, and so we decided to withdraw all Iraqi Security Forces from Iraq.”

The Free Iraq Foundation, a Washington, D.C. based Iraqi think tank group in exile, hailed the Prime Minister’s decision as a step to help end the bloodshed of Iraqi military troops.

“Our domestic policy has been tied too closely to the foreign policy of the U.S., and we have been paying a heavy price for that. It is time to let the Americans deal with their own foreign policy by themselves,” said Free Iraq Foundation spokeswoman, Ms. Inna Qwag Myer.

Iraqi military troops will retreat to U.S. military bases outside of Iraq, while U.S. military forces will remain in Iraq. President Bush responded to the development by ensuring Americans that this will not adversely affect the strategy to train Iraqi troops to meet the challenges of securing Iraq.

“As Iraqis stand up, we will stand down. This just may make the process of us standing down a little longer, now,” said President Bush.

Unconfirmed Sources political satire and news story parodies as represented above are written as satire or parody. They are, of course, fictitious.