7 Telltale Signs He’s Not in Love Anymore

“I don’t love you anymore.” No matter how this arrangement of words is said, it is absolutely soul-crushing.

Maybe he tries to make you feel better by saying, “It’s not you, it’s me.” This is definitely up there on the list of most commonly used breakup lines. And as polite as this breakup line may be, the truth behind it is a little harder to swallow: “I just don’t myself with someone like you.” Ouch.

When a guy breaks up with you in this way, it can be both painful and confusing. He seemed like he was really into you, like he really loved you…what happened?

7 Signs He’s Not in Love Anymore

Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

1. He’s Indifferent to You

He used to be so into you and your life, but lately, it doesn’t seem like he cares. You wish he’d ask how work went or tell you to be safe if you went out with the girls. He doesn’t ask about your day anymore…or seem to care how your life is going.

It doesn’t even seem like you annoy him anymore. He’s not asking you to stop doing certain things that ticked him off in the past, like leaving your towel on a doorknob or painting your nails in the bathroom. He’s not emotionally invested in you or what goes on in your life. The passion has disappeared.

Even the negative passion is gone and you don’t fight or argue anymore. The flames in general are just fizzling…

2. He Disappears for Days or Weeks at a Time

You can’t get ahold of him for stretches of days or weeks at a time. When he pops back up and you ask him about it, he shrugs it off saying he just got busy. If he cared about you, he wouldn’t become too busy to touch base. Men don’t just forget about the women they care about.

If he checks in and out of the relationship, it’s a strong sign he’s planning to check out for good by breaking up with you.

Your man hasn’t been talking to you as much as he used to. Texts go unanswered, phone calls go to voicemail, and video chat is denied when a man goes silent. In fact, he might turn off his phone completely. Forget about hanging out or going on dates; he’s too busy for that.

He has stopped talking to you about things, even things you may not care much about like sports or cars. If this happens, he has shut down and won’t let you in. He distances himself emotionally and physically, refusing to talk about your relationship and canceling date night.

It’s important to note that sometimes guys need space. It’s natural and normal to sometimes take some time away to process the relationship and their feelings. What’s not normal is for him to not come back and leave you wondering if you’re even in a relationship which him anymore.

4. He Doesn’t Open Up to You Anymore

The biggest sign a man is in love shows when he opens himself up emotionally. It’s not easy for most men to open up to a woman emotionally. When a man has closed himself off to you, it means he is no longer in love.

He doesn’t want you on the inside anymore. He’ll stop talking to you, about big and small things. His answers will change from warm, friendly conversation to brief, cold answers. He’ll clam up. You really won’t talk anymore whereas you used to talk about anything for hours and would engage in marathon texting sessions.

5. You’re Not a Priority Anymore

You used to get a good morning text as soon as he woke up and be the first person he’d want to see as soon as he got off work. Now you might get a text once a day if you’re lucky and every time you suggest hanging out, he’s busy. Other things have knocked you off the list, like work, friends, the gym, basketball, etc. You no longer come first or even second or third. Suddenly, he’s busy all the time.

He stops taking care of you like he used to. He stops doing things for you, helping you or doing favors for you, and helping out around the house. He just doesn’t seem to care.

6. He Doesn’t Try Anymore

Surprise flowers at work, take-out from your favorite Chinese place, and picking up something special for you when he’s on a business trip just doesn’t happen anymore.

He’s stopped doing the little things that show he cares. He no longer tries to romance you, impress you, or do things for you. In fact, he’s acting more selfish than you’ve ever seen him. He no longer cares about your needs, only fulfilling his own.

If your boyfriend shows these signs, it can be distressing. Though it can hurt, it’s better to move on than hurting yourself even more by trying to put the pieces back together.

Just because he isn’t in love with you anymore doesn’t mean you are flawed or unworthy or unlovable. It just means it wasn’t a match, and this can be for various reasons. And this is OK. Now you’re free to move on to someone who might be a lot better suited for you.