The thing about the average Joe category is that it's splintering. Sure, everyone wants 5 inches of travel, the new standard. But one camp wants a super-slack geometry so they can hit insanely steep, 8-mile downhills. The other camp is more traditional. They want bikes that climb nearly as well as race bikes, even if they're less fun at the ski hill or bike park. The good thing is that, by swapping tires, shocks, forks and the like, the same frame can go either way. If you want a go-nearly-anywhere bike, one of the following eight Joes will do you nicely.

It Rocks: If you ride like your name is Joe Burly But Not If: You're a perfectionist when the trail turns technical.

You say you always wear baggies? "Slim" is not your nickname? Your favorite beer comes in a suitcase? This, sir, is your 7005-butted-aluminum machine, a match to your muscle, a mirror of your burliness. Just check the size of the welds where the top-, down- and head tubes meet-this bike's meant for abuse. And with its 68-degree head angle, it's meant for ripping steeps, too. Forget about getting your stomach on the saddle, just drop in and hang on.

When you get to the bottom, you might find, like we did, that the Fox Float R shock does a fine job of flattening out singletrack bumps on rolling terrain, though the Marzocchi EXR Pro fork, when mated to that slack head angle, isn't great for smothering faults in the Earth. Over washboard especially, the nose of our Dawg wanted to walk sideways; on compound washboards with turns, we had to turn the speed dial way back. That slack nose also created problems for climbing slippery terrain. When we stayed back in the saddle, as one must to keep rear-wheel traction, the nose lifted. When we moved forward to compensate, there was no way to tame back-tire spin. The fix we found for all this? We went downhill, my man, and our grins widened.

It Rocks: 'Cause you're getting more bike for less. The 1000 has the same hydroformed aluminum frame as the $4,999 Prophet 4000 that we tested last year (Winter '04), as well as the same Hot Box pivot and swingarm-the latter is free of welds, so there are no heat-induced weak points. The stiff swingarm and Manitou Swinger shock make for an extra-efficient pedaling platform, despite the Prophet's 5.5 inches (140mm) of front and rear travel. But Not If: You want it light; the Prophet 4000 we tested weighed 27 lb. With some heavier parts, you can expect the 1000 to weigh at least a pound more.