Wednesday, November 26, 2008

It's Official....I'm Injured Follow Up...LORD, I need some healing!

I had my follow up visit with my podiatrist today, and yes she did touch my foot (EWWWW) but not as much as last time; and she only touched the injured foot. Did I mention that my podiatrist is the cutest thing I've ever seen, and she looks like she could be one of my children? Well she is, and she does. I mean seriously this girl can't be more than 16 or 17, so she must be a genius to have already graduated with the umpteen degrees it takes to be a specialist in the field of feet. She's really sweet and very kind as well which always makes doctor visits nice. Anywho she asked me about how my foot was feeling, and I told her it was definitely not normal; but it was feeling a lot better. She asked me to put on my tennis shoes and walk for her, so she could see if I might need some different type of shoes...thank you Jesus that she said mine looked fine. The last thing I want to do is invest a small fortune of my non existent Christmas budget into some ugly orthotics. Then she said she wanted me to do physical therapy twice/week for the next month or so and come back to see her in 3 weeks. I tried to mask my thoughts and stay the calm, cool and collected mama that I am; BUT I immediately got a little nervous. I've had PT previously for a severly injured shoulder (that I received when I was 19 from being rear ended by a cement truck), and it was excrutiatingly PAINFUL, I mean bring you to your knees, leave with a headache and mascara all over your face from crying in pain; but it worked. I left her office and walked (limped) next door to the PT office. The receptionist asked me for my insurance card, drivers license and then handed me 3 forms to read and fill out. The first 2 were just questions about my medical history and my injury which by the way I feel sort of silly saying that, because I don't feel like it's really an injury; since I truly have NO idea how it happened. I mean I wasn't doing something athletic or hard working or anything that may cause an injury, but I will continue to call it an injury; because that's what they refer to it as. Back to the forms....I got to the 3rd form which describes the office policies, scheduling appointments, etc. I was browsing through it until I read the following which literally STOPPED ME IN MY TRACKS (or limping I might say)...."some of the techniques may call for extreme applications from a light force to a high impact force. A loud popping sound may be heard while receiving such force." HAVE MERCY.....Lord, forgive me for my sins and heal me of this immediately....I don't want to experience possible high impact force or a popping sound. WORK WITH ME HERE....I think I can live with this limp for the rest of my life...honest I think I can...it's really not that painful just mainly uncomfortable and inconvenient. As I approached the desk while reading this, I re-read again to make sure that's what it said; and sure enough it did indeed say those words. Fortunately there was another lady standing there scheduling some appointments, so I had a moment to regroup and gather myself. I will tell you that I have a HIGH pain tolerance. I mean a really HIGH pain tolerance, and it's not the pain that makes me the least bit nervous; but it's the anticipation of the impact and the popping and the fear of not being able to relax. Each time I've been in the hospital, to give birth, it's not the contractions and the birthing that makes me nervous...it's that IV drip they give you (which I think is to keep you hydrated) that makes me a NERVOUS WRECK....the needle...I can't take it. I have rolling thin veins which usually entails several, I mean several (at least 150), sticks to get the IV in...oftentimes it ends up in my wrist (OUCH) instead of my hand. Because I have had such horrible experiences with this needle poking throughout my life, I have a lot of ANXIETY and a true aversion to needles; but at least I don't tantrum anymore. As far as the popping and high impact force, I can trace this back to the following....when I was little, my dad decided that my mom needed to have her back popped; so she lay down on the floor while he proceeded to try to pop her back...I'm sure you know that scenario....lay down on your stomache while someone walks on your back or jerks your shoulder back. HOWEVER, her back did not pop; and in fact he (unintentionally of course) broke her collar bone. Well that was all she wrote for me and chiropractors or back popping or any kind of popping, and now I have this anxiety about just waiting for the pop or the "high impact force." It's not the pain I'm frightened about, it's the waiting and waiting and waiting for the POP....Good Night Nurse. As I said I had PT a long time ago, and it was excrutiating; but it helped....so although I don't look forward to the pain, I am not really nervous about it. I won't start PT until next week, so Yahoo....I'll have even more time to think about it and build more and more anxiety. I'll keep you posted, LITERALLY! That way you can choose to read about it or not! PRAY FOR PEACE or a miraculous healing!

About Me

Why I Think Out Loud...

I started journaling several years ago when I realized that I couldn't possibly remember every milestone, cute phrase, wonderful expression, heart tugging word or life changing action that occurs within my own family. I had to face the fact that my brain has become fuller and fuller with each baby born and each day that passes; and now it's overloaded. I find myself having to write down everything from a daily "To Do" list to much more important things like the first time my son kissed me on the lips. I don't want to take anything for granted and chance that I might not remember. I journal in a notebook, in my own handwriting, with the intent and hope that someday my sweet buttercups will cherish having these journals in their mama's own handwriting. I started this blog, because there are some things that are meant to be shared and some things that I hope someone will read and enjoy. Maybe I can learn something from a reader or two as well.

Payne Family Videos!!

Find Me On Instagram!!

PHOTOGRAPHY IS A PASSION! Click to view my photography Facebook page!

Photos On Instagram!!

I am happy to say....

Jesus is my first love!

My children are beautiful, inside and out!

I'm as happy as I've ever been!

NPayne thinks I'm beautiful!

I LOVE vintage!

I live in America!

I let my children get dirty!

I thoroughly enjoy Bible Study!

I'm addicted to linens!

I enjoy watching football on TV!

I live in a house full of imagination!

I pray for world peace!

I support our troops and pray for them daily!

I am VERY sentimental!

My parents were married for 40 years!

I love thrift stores and flea markets!

My favorite room in my house is the nursery!

There are 4 princesses and one prince in my house which makes me a Queen!