Tag Archives: Christmas

Friday the 13th 2019 was the last day of work for Hubby. Ross is his name but I do like the term Hubby so this is what I will likely stick with.

I’m not into the whole superstition thing but it is quite amazing how certain things learned from childhood hang around, like it being a bad luck day, don’t walk in front of a black cat, throw salt over your left shoulder or right, step over a crack or you’ll break your mothers back and that is all supposed to ward off bad things.

I grew up with all that vast knowledge, which didn’t mean much then, and even less now but someone has made mention of the date of Hubby’s retirement and that is what triggered all the memory quotes.

Well, no bad luck events took place and obviously Hubby didn’t take any notice of the date either. It was all about the dates lining up for the best possible scenario for holidays which began Friday and extending into January 23, 2020 which will be the official retirement date.

It was also all about dates and taxes.

Hubby had his farewell work event, cards and gifts given, hugs and best wishes and a boot out the door. Done.

Actually, he was well respected and will be missed by those who were supported by him and with those with whom he worked. Hubby assisted people in crisis, taught workshops on grief, loss and resiliency and emotional first aid…and much more. I wasn’t there and knew very few of ‘his people’ so will just leave it at that.

He’s taken his gift of new binoculars and packed them for our upcoming trip and is waiting for a new piece of luggage which may or may not arrive before we leave.

One of the gifts he received from his closest colleague is a wooden plaque of one of hubby’s favorite quotes, “Anyone who willingly enters into the pain of a stranger is truly a remarkable person” by Henri J.M. Nouwen. It sits prominently on our fireplace mantle.

We, as in me, our daughter TL, our son Ra and our daughter in law Ca, had our own event, a family pizza making night and gave hubby some new bike shorts and a snazzy shirt… nice gift but really it is a motivational device to get him out of the house and staying active.

He likes bike riding so it won’t be a new experience – he will just look a lot better doing it.

If I know him… and I do, he will find some random patch and sew it or glue it onto his shirt. It will be some gleaming adoration for the Chicago Blackhawks hockey team.

Pickleball workshop for people from Hubby’s work environment. That was fun. I and two of our pickleball friends assisted with reigning in the keener’s and encouraging the shyer ones.

Arranging plans for looking after our beloved Thomas the Cat…upcoming Vet appointment to get an anal gland expression done. Just imagine that for a minute.

The list for cleaning the house is growing…we have a person moving in and well, the house needs to be presentable.

There are still ten days until departure and events to attend, appetizer and drinks, friends to see, annual 24th extended family dinner and gift exchange, one more pair of baby booties to crochet, likely a last minute gift to buy, our immediate family breakfast, gift exchange and dinner, then our main tidy and pack day and we will be off…

But first, Hubby doesn’t know this yet. I have arranged a date for us. We are going for a manicure and a pedicure. This is all so self-serving of course.

Hubby will be switching shoes soon for flip flops and I may be sitting next to his feet on a lounge chair. I want to like what I see.

So, it seems like a lazy, slow and rainy Saturday afternoon but at this house there is a countdown happening. With the countdown an endlessly long to-do list keeps updating itself.

In FIVE work days hubby is retiring. Just letting that statement sit there and I’m allowing it to percolate in my brain.

In trying not to panic…because where am I going to put him – as his office belongings are slowing taking over a mostly under used second bedroom space in our home.

This retirement process has been building for quite some time- the first discussions being, “Are you kidding? No way!”, to, “Oh, okay…”, with hours and hours of chats in between.

It’s rather exciting and obviously unknown at this point.

Plans for Christmas meals, gift buying and house cleaning in preparation for a holiday are underway and my mind swirls with details…

I like my alone morning time, he spends his days with the multitudes of people.

I enjoy quiet (he likes a radio on), I open the curtains, he may or may not get around to it, will he still kindly make my coffee then quietly leave the house 😊, is he going to expect lunch at home, are we going to go ‘everywhere’ together, do I have to invite him along when I take myself out for breakfast…do we report all our activities to each other…and on and on it goes.

How goes it for others…you out there?

Whats worked and not worked.

Come check it out sometime over the next few months-pretty sure its going to be a a creative journey.

After nearly two months of illness, on Sunday July 11th I felt well enough to attend a church service. The pastor who spoke that day read Psalm 23 and challenged others to read and ponder over a weeks’ time what God might be saying individually.

I took up the challenge and my regular journal recorded… after my first reading, the 4th verse jumped out at me, “even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death – fearing no evil… my immediate reaction is fear. Perhaps because I’ve been ill for 2 months and that’s been terrible enough. I would struggle greatly with a “death sentence.”

I’m not finished here yet but often I wonder what I’m doing – what’s of value – what’s not. Too often I believe I’m simply coasting, putting in time – wondering, waiting, – not living the life intended for me…I then recalled some areas of my life where I’d struggled by not fulfilling my own life’s dreams and the current journey to rectify that.

My journal ended with, Now what? What’s it all meant? How am I moving forward?

It was weeks before I made it back to my journal as my body let me know it had been through a battle and needed some more assistance.

With all the antibiotics and pain medications going into me my gut ran out of good bacteria and the nasty bacteria called Clostridium Difficile decided to take over. Was it already there? Had I picked it up somewhere else? Why me? I’ll never know…

The bacteria were in control and with a bare minimum of details, I stayed home, I stayed close to the bathroom and I stayed in bed. It was the amount of blood passing through me that sent me back to plunk myself down in the doc’s chair once again.

So, one might ask, how does C Difficile get treated? The crazy answer is with yet another antibiotic.

In my Gratitude Journal July 22 – Grateful for “more” antibiotics to kill off the C Difficile bug in my body. I will hopefully be on the mend.

On that day, I continued my Psalm 23 reflections and in my regular journal, recorded some notes…Bang – right off the top – The LORD is my shepherd, not life, not hubby, not the things about me. “I shall not be in want”

He will satisfy me – as I think about what to write, what to paint, where to spend time…if I go to my Shepherd and ask for his direction he will guide me, show me and lead me because “his rod and staff” they will comfort me. In him, amid his presence I am surrounded by his cloud of protection. Whatever it is I do; it will be right.

The following day in a continued somber mood Psalm 23’s reflections met mine and my pen flowed with ink over several pages in my regular journal.

The water runs out of the spout in my garden fountain, into a bowl and trickles below only to cycle through the system again, and again.

This is how God is leading me beside quiet waters.

I’ve sat many hours this summer, listening to the water, waiting to be well while one strange infection after another attacks my body.

I live in a Modular Home Park – AKA (also known as) a mobile home park where a typical impression might be one of lower class, poor and unkempt – a TV view of what I’ve often heard called, ‘white trailer trash’.

I love it here, when I can put aside my own biased views of my home location. Out my back door is the deck designed by hubby who then enlisted the services of his talented brother to build.

Surrounding our little yard is the wood fence designed and built by hubby earlier this spring just as the garden was coming to life and I became ill. My daughter and I had assisted just enough one day to get bragging rights that ‘we’ built the fence together.

The fence keeps Thomas the Cat within, who graciously chooses not to jump and run and is the perfect backdrop for the multitude of seasonal pops of color that have entertained me.

I feel protected and contained within my boundaries – it reminds me of ‘walking with Jesus’ along the narrow path – completely free within.

So, I sit, I think, I pray…

I wish I were well, I fight with the frustration and anger that rises within me. I have little choice but to relax, accept that I feel fatigued, have little energy and I cannot control this current situation. I can instead, enjoy watching my cat enjoy being outside with me looking at the birds and listen to their songs. Like him, I can stretch out my legs and lift my face to the warmth of the sun and simply… be beside quiet waters.

This is my moment to be grateful for all I have and which is being provided for me.

On Monday, August 1st I wrote in my Grateful Journal, Grateful. Feel better/off medication.

On Monday, August 22nd I wrote in my Grateful Journal, Grateful. Sunshine. Feel Healthy. Have options. Have a future to enjoy.

Please look for my next and last entry on …my summer saga…after all, summer came and went, fall rains arrived and it is nearly time for Christmas trees and snowfalls.

A great surprise for me this past December was discovering a creative talent in a fellow Pickleball player when he showed me pictures via his phone, of some necklaces he had crafted out of recycled ‘bits’, stones and beads etc, that he’d picked up. Using silver wire as the link to pull it all together which he carefully twisted into tiny designs of loops he managed to create some lovely jewelry.

While admiring his craft my mind looped over to my home jewelry box which contained an unused pearl necklace so I pondered out loud and drew him into my visual idea of creating two bracelets. I gave him a couple of ideas and being the artist creative type that he is, he agreed to try out the project.

The next time I saw my friend my pearl necklace was handed over and off he went. I thought it may take weeks to put the bracelets together but within 24 hours I was shown one of the designed pieces, complete with a Turquoise stone he had laying around in his supply stash of jewels. Within a couple more days I had both bracelets in hand.

These bracelets became two surprise gifts in Christmas stockings – something special for two special ladies in my family.

If anyone is interested in having a jewelry piece created or redesigned please respond via this blog and I will pass on your name and contact info to my friend who has given me permission to post this blog.

Logistics of location, postage, etc…will have to be decided upon between artist and purchaser. I’m a writer, not usually considered a salesperson, however, the above picture may lure you in as my friend’s phone photo of his handiwork stirred up my own artistic mind.