May 15, 2006

doomsayers

“You are TOO happy.”

We are walking down a crowded street on a Friday night. It is not the first time someone has said this to me in the past few weeks, nor is Lee, the friend I am walking with, the first person to say it.

“I’m really happy for you but….”

The look on her face says it all:But what if he changes his mind?But what if you get hurt again?But what if things don’t work out?

These past few weeks, I have been blissfully, over the moon happy, something that most people in my life have felt the need to comment on. I know they mean well; that what they say or do, are done out of love and concern, if not also with a fair amount of projection. I don’t know if he’ll change his mind or if things will work out with us. I do know that it’s a risk I’m willing to take. For once in my life, I want to enjoy the moment without all the disaster scenarios playing in my mind.

So when yet another friend deemed it necessary to temper my current happiness, yesterday, I told her to stop.

Comments

If I were truly in your life, I'd probably be one of those doomsayers; I am FIERCELY protective of my friends, and I am a person who believes that, for me, at least, any guy who doesn't KNOW, unequivocally, I'm the right girl is, ergo, the wrong guy for me (but honestly, I'm not even sure that's an accurate characterization of P, it sounds like you have both known there was something special there from Day 1, despite his inability/unwillingess to act on it, immediately).

That being said, I've enjoyed reading your adventures for some time and feel that I know you to be a very intelligent, mature person, and it DOES seem that P is finally doing something he has not done before: commit. Because of that difference, I'll let myself be excited for you ;-) That is truly truly exciting!!