1. It's okay to call hooters "knockers" and sometimes "snack trays."2. It is wrong to be French.3. It's okay to put all bad people in a giant meat grinder.4. Lawyers: see rule three.5. It is okay to drive a gas guzzler if it helps you get babes.6. Everyone should car pool but me.7. Bring back the word "stewardesses"8. Synchronized Swimming is not a sport.9. Mudwrestling is a sport.

MaudlinMutantMollusk:simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

Exceptions

'm pretty sure there's something in the director's cut edition that has to do with loving thy neighbor being suspended when neighbor is gay, not stealing except when capitalism, and looking the other way about killing when the dead guy is brown

13) Thou Shalt not be Smug:Before you got these tablets you were just a s big a sinner as that guy you are looking down on, so cut it out

14) IF thou seest a guy with a short mustache and a funny haircut coming to power in your country, thou shalt GTFO immediately

15) Thou shalt shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

TheCharmerUnderMe:I'm sorry, but is that the All-seeing Eye in the pyramid above the eagle? What the hell is THAT doing on there?

Yup, that's the Masonic Eye--the eye of God as the providential Great Architect. Its on our U.S. money of course, and so I'm guessing they wanted a fusion of historically idolatrous symbols used to represent God's favor on the American Experiment. Seriously, the commandment in Exodus 20 expressly forbids making images of ANYTHING in Heaven as well as Earth. So with the Bald Eagle on there they're getting a two'fer deal.

13) Thou Shalt not be Smug:Before you got these tablets you were just a s big a sinner as that guy you are looking down on, so cut it out

14) IF thou seest a guy with a short mustache and a funny haircut coming to power in your country, thou shalt GTFO immediately

15) Thou shalt shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

16) Thou shalt read the thread before posting your Mel Brooks jpg, to make sure your Very Clever Joke hasn't already been beaten to death long before you got here.

simplicimus:Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

The other 5 were simply advisory, and dealt with interpersonal relationships. Some biblical scholars believe that they read as follows:

11. Favor thine brothers before harlots.12. If there be grass on the field, though mayest play ball.13. Stickest not thy manhood into crazy.14. Once thou hast gone black, thou shalt not again go back.15. Remember always: No matter how fetching appearest thy neighbor's wife or thy neighbor's maidservant, some man, somewhere, and quite possibly thy neighbor, hath grown weary of her excrement.

Cyberluddite:The other 5 were simply advisory, and dealt with interpersonal relationships. Some biblical scholars believe that they read as follows:

11. Favor thine brothers before harlots.12. If there be grass on the field, though mayest play ball.13. Stickest not thy manhood into crazy.14. Once thou hast gone black, thou shalt not again go back.15. Remember always: No matter how fetching appearest thy neighbor's wife or thy neighbor's maidservant, some man, somewhere, and quite possibly thy neighbor, hath grown weary of her excrement.