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It's a bit different from the one posted in the episode thread. But I'd rather type it here now than dig this late in the night. This is basically a comical take on why several characters were fretting over Nanoha stressing herself in several episodes.

Very well, here was one of my jokes when the reason behind Nanoha's injury was still a mystery and the paranoia was at it's height.

It's a bit different from the one posted in the episode thread. But I'd rather type it here now than dig this late in the night. This is basically a comical take on why several characters were fretting over Nanoha stressing herself in several episodes.

You should try to find my list of 'possible' reasoning that paranoid people would use to 'try' to prove that she has health problems...

Taken from episode 5's thread... At that time we were talking about what would happen if it turns out the the villians had something to do with Caro's tribe...

We ended up with a Lolicon Warlord who kidnapped Caro to force her into marriage... Now in our defence, we were all still drunk by the Erio/Caro moments from the entire episode

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nightengale

What a riot that would be if it turned out to be nothing more than a joke.

Spoiler for since I suck at witty humour:

Priest: Would you, *insert witty tribal name with rank* take *insert wife's name(S)* as your shelter, as ones who you will treasure and love equally for all eternity?

Warlord: I do.

Caro:I...I...

*Elio crashes down on the wedding*

Elio: Caro!

Caro: Elio..kun. What are you doing...here?

Elio: Isn't it obvious!? I'm here to stop this foolish wedlock.

Caro: Why?

Elio: Because I...I... You don't even love that guy! I' know that much!

Warlord: It's you...If I recall, you're that boy from Commander Yagami's division. Is this TSAB's declaration of war against the tribal union, boy?

Elio: No...I am here for myself. My friends and others have nothing to do with this. I am here because I want to protect someone important to me. And I will take Caro back with me, even if it means defeating you!

Strada: Something you are not capable of doing, Sir.

Elio: Don't spoil the mood, Strada.

Warlord: Interesting. So Caro is that important to you? Are you saying you are capable of making her happy? Are you saying that for her sake, you'd be willing to take my place and grant her happiness? A brat like you?

Elio:...Yes. I do.

~~~~~~

Chrono: I could get court-martialed for this.

Hayate: Mah, let's not fret too much over the details.

Chrono: You're awfully calm, it's scary.

~~~~~~~

Warlord:....Pfft....Congratulations. You pass.

Elio: Eh?

*Warlord reveals himself to be Yuuno, and Priest as Carim*

Elio/Caro: Eh...EH...EHH!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??

Carim: Under the vows of Scryan law and Velkan lock, I proclaim Elio and Caro, husband and wife.

Carim: Well, you see, Hayate was getting, well impatient at the "progress" of "certain things" especially seeing how "fast" it started out, and she kinda asked Yuuno-kun and me here a little favour, and it was just too hard to say "no".

Yuuno: Sorry, Elio, I tried to help...

Carim: Anyway, screw the details, you may kiss your bride.

Caro: *blushes*

Elio: Wait! I'm not ready for this!

Strada: It's simple, Sir. Do it like it CPR practice.

Elio: SHUT UP!

Strada: Very well, Sir. ACCELERATION!

Elio: WARGH!!! *crashes into Caro...you know the rest*

~~~~~~~~

*looking from Claudia's bridge*

Chrono: Do you have any IDEA how many things I'll have to go through to apologize for PERSONAL UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE of TSAB Property?

Hayate: Well, you won't get court-martialed, so at least it wasn't the worst case scenario.

Chrono: That's not the point... Know a little restraint, will you? This is not just a little too much for a joke, you know.

Hayate: There's a saying, "if you want to do something, do it ALL THE WAY."

Yuuno: Well... There is one way, but it's all very Anicent Rome... You're going to need a toga... And a sword of course...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Will face his true feelings...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erio: She's really not my girlfriend...

Vice: You're lips says ''no'', but your 'spear' says "yes"

Erio: HUH?

Strada:Wasn't me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Crash of dramatic music, and the scene changes to a slo-mo fight scene of hot and sweaty Erio, top ripped off from attacks, yelling blue murder as he lays slicing waste to the throngs of hetero-phobic Legionnaires assisting the Lolicon Warlord. Cut scenes to other mages, then...)

Voice: Where do you think you're going...

(Warriors look up at the gathering pink energies that completely shrouds Nanoha)Warrior #3: Run for it! The White De--

Nanoha: BUSTER!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From the director of "Paranoia of Chrono Halluon"...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrono: So let me get this straight...

Hayate: Take your time.

Chrono: You want to 'borrow' my warship...

Fate: Only because nobody else would.

Chrono: ... Fly to a distant planet...

Hayate: It's really not that far...

Chrono: Drop the whole of Riot Force 6 on it...

Fate: It's just Team Star and Lightning...

Chrono: ... And somehow rescue Erio's girlfriend from a preverted lolicon warlord who is uniting the warring tribes by marrying their "princesses"...

Hayate: Absolutely.

Chrono: ... Even if it means having them to declare war on Mid-childa.

Fate: Something like that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Comes the greatest epic love story never told...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erio: (swings church doors open with a slam) OBJECTION!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The Ride of Erio Mondial"

Only in FF.net.

Then came Nighty's revelation, for the truth of the wedding ceremony:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nightengale

Spoiler:

Hayate: Good Job, everyone!

Yuuno: Huh...that was tiring.

Hayate: To be honest, I never knew you had it in you to think about such an idea. I'm looking at you at a whole new different light now, Yuuno-kun.

Yuuno: What are you talking about?

Hayate: What? Aren't you the one who told Caro to pass to me your 'secret plans'? See? I even have this letter, with your Library stamp on it.

Yuuno:...I didn't write this! There's no way I could've come up with something so...so ludicrious.

Chrono: I agree for once. *goes back to writing apology letters*

Yuuno: Besides, aren't YOU the one who requested Caro to pass on to me your "special mission debriefing" to pass to Carim so that we could be included in this "plan" of yours? See, this hologram-letter had you on it!

Hayate: I did not do that!

Yuuno: What the heck-

Hayate: Hmm....

~~~~~~~

*in the bedroom*

Elio: Urgh...Caro, aren't we speeding along too FAST?

Caro: What? I thought speed was your specialty. Surely, you don't mind it if I... speed things up a little?

Elio: Okay, this is getting scary...

You should be able to tell who the mastermind is...hehehe....

We are SO off-topic, Nanoha-forum style.

That was just WIN! And then, my first silly attempt at humor here. Ah the memories...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kha

Another idea while I was at lunch. 4koma style.

------

[Frame 1]

Chrono: No.Hayate: But...Chorno: No means no! I cannot allow TSAB property to be misused like this!

[Frame 2]

Fate: But we really need to get our team member back!Chono: Think of some other way.Nanoha: Chrono-kun you meanie!Chrono: I'm not listening...

[Frame 3]

(The Aces huddled in one corner whispering. Chrono only hears disjointed words)

Hayate: ...We'll have to use that...Fate: ...It can't be helped...Nanoha: ...I hope it works...Chrono: *looks worried and sweating* What are they up to...?

[Frame 4]

Aces: ONEGAI, ONIIICHAAAN!!!

(Chrono is seen flying with a trail of nosebleed)

Tagline: "The Ultimate Attack of the Aces"

------

Thanks mi'lord! Btw, I first called it "Bride of Erio Mondial", but then realized that by dropping the 'B' it sounds a lot better. I also left out from the 300 horde fight bit that "the other mages were in various stages of Barrier Jacket rippage"

Yuuno: Well... There is one way, but it's all very Anicent Rome... You're going to need a toga... And a sword of course...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Will face his true feelings...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erio: She's really not my girlfriend...

Vice: You're lips says ''no'', but your 'spear' says "yes"

Erio: HUH?

Strada:Wasn't me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Crash of dramatic music, and the scene changes to a slo-mo fight scene of hot and sweaty Erio, top ripped off from attacks, yelling blue murder as he lays slicing waste to the throngs of hetero-phobic Legionnaires assisting the Lolicon Warlord. Cut scenes to other mages, then...)

Voice: Where do you think you're going...

(Warriors look up at the gathering pink energies that completely shrouds Nanoha)Warrior #3: Run for it! The White De--

Nanoha: BUSTER!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From the director of "Paranoia of Chrono Halluon"...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chrono: So let me get this straight...

Hayate: Take your time.

Chrono: You want to 'borrow' my warship...

Fate: Only because nobody else would.

Chrono: ... Fly to a distant planet...

Hayate: It's really not that far...

Chrono: Drop the whole of Riot Force 6 on it...

Fate: It's just Team Star and Lightning...

Chrono: ... And somehow rescue Erio's girlfriend from a preverted lolicon warlord who is uniting the warring tribes by marrying their "princesses"...

Hayate: Absolutely.

Chrono: ... Even if it means having them to declare war on Mid-childa.

Fate: Something like that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Comes the greatest epic love story never told...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Erio: (swings church doors open with a slam) OBJECTION!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The Ride of Erio Mondial"

Only in FF.net.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Forgive me but I had to say what I saw in my head...

Then came Nighty's revelation, for the truth of the wedding ceremony:

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nightengale

I don't know, I don't quite like how they came out for me. Yours sound more sharply natural to me. Then again, I rarely ever find my own "works" good.

Anti-climax, huh? I didn't want to add this, but I think it adds to the drama.

Spoiler:

Hayate: Good Job, everyone!

Yuuno: Huh...that was tiring.

Hayate: To be honest, I never knew you had it in you to think about such an idea. I'm looking at you at a whole new different light now, Yuuno-kun.

Yuuno: What are you talking about?

Hayate: What? Aren't you the one who told Caro to pass to me your 'secret plans'? See? I even have this letter, with your Library stamp on it.

Yuuno:...I didn't write this! There's no way I could've come up with something so...so ludicrious.

Chrono: I agree for once. *goes back to writing apology letters*

Yuuno: Besides, aren't YOU the one who requested Caro to pass on to me your "special mission debriefing" to pass to Carim so that we could be included in this "plan" of yours? See, this hologram-letter had you on it!

Hayate: I did not do that!

Yuuno: What the heck-

Hayate: Hmm....

~~~~~~~

*in the bedroom*

Elio: Urgh...Caro, aren't we speeding along too FAST?

Caro: What? I thought speed was your specialty. Surely, you don't mind it if I... speed things up a little?

Elio: Okay, this is getting scary...

You should be able to tell who the mastermind is...hehehe....

We are SO off-topic, Nanoha-forum style.

That was just WIN!

And then, my first silly attempt at humor here. Ah the memories...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kha

Spoiler:

Another idea while I was at lunch. 4koma style.

------

[Frame 1]

Chrono: No.Hayate: But...Chorno: No means no! I cannot allow TSAB property to be misused like this!

[Frame 2]

Fate: But we really need to get our team member back!Chono: Think of some other way.Nanoha: Chrono-kun you meanie!Chrono: I'm not listening...

[Frame 3]

(The Aces huddled in one corner whispering. Chrono only hears disjointed words)

Hayate: ...We'll have to use that...Fate: ...It can't be helped...Nanoha: ...I hope it works...Chrono: *looks worried and sweating* What are they up to...?

[Frame 4]

Aces: ONEGAI, ONIIICHAAAN!!!

(Chrono is seen flying with a trail of nosebleed)

Tagline: "The Ultimate Attack of the Aces"

------

Fanfiction in the Epi thread, and non-fiction in the Fanfic thread indeed... Not that I wish to rectify it.

*turns pale* Oh my legs... I'm lamed out...

But I am with Chronos-EDIT: I meant Chaos! Must've been typig too fast - on that. Your phrasing is very good.

Thanks mi'lord! Btw, I first called it "Bride of Erio Mondial", but then realized that by dropping the 'B' it sounds a lot better. I also left out from the 300 horde fight bit that "the other mages were in various stages of Barrier Jacket rippage"

Kha...You should be a movie director! This is an absolute WIN Nightengale's scenario was very funny too And that "ONEGAI ONIII-CHAAAN!" line is PRICELESS Ah, the memories indeed

Jail's House of Rock
---- ----
The Doctor threw a party in the secret base.
The Riot Force was there and they started to chase.
The clones were jumpin' and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out StrikerS sing.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Testarossa swung her Bardiche Assault,
Nanoha was blowin' up the cloning vault.
The Strada boy from Project F went crash, boom, bang,
and one whole section was the Belkan Gang.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
"You're the cutest Jail Girl I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
come on and do the Jail's House of Rock with me."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Run, run, run, run

A sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
An Admiral said, "Hey, Ferret, don't you be no square.
If you can't find a target, be Medical Care."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Sweet Lutecia said to Vest, "For Goodness sake,
no one's lookin', now's our chance to make a break."
But Vest turned to Lutecia and said, "Nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.
~~~~ ~~~~

The Doctor threw a party in the secret base.
The Riot Force was there and they started to chase.
The clones were jumpin' and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out StrikerS sing.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Testarossa swung her Bardiche Assault,
Nanoha was blowin' up the cloning vault.
The Strada boy from Project F went crash, boom, bang,
and one whole section was the Belkan Gang.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
"You're the cutest Jail Girl I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
come on and do the Jail's House of Rock with me."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Run, run, run, run

A sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
An Admiral said, "Hey, Ferret, don't you be no square.
If you can't find a target, be Medical Care."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Sweet Lutecia said to Vest, "For Goodness sake,
no one's lookin', now's our chance to make a break."
But Vest turned to Lutecia and said, "Nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Jail's House of Rock
---- ----
The Doctor threw a party in the secret base.
The Riot Force was there and they started to chase.
The clones were jumpin' and the joint began to swing.
You should've heard those knocked out StrikerS sing.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Testarossa swung her Bardiche Assault,
Nanoha was blowin' up the cloning vault.
The Strada boy from Project F went crash, boom, bang,
and one whole section was the Belkan Gang.
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Number forty-seven said to number three:
"You're the cutest Jail Girl I ever did see.
I sure would be delighted with your company,
come on and do the Jail's House of Rock with me."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Run, run, run, run

A sad sack was a sittin' on a block of stone
way over in the corner weepin' all alone.
An Admiral said, "Hey, Ferret, don't you be no square.
If you can't find a target, be Medical Care."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.

Sweet Lutecia said to Vest, "For Goodness sake,
no one's lookin', now's our chance to make a break."
But Vest turned to Lutecia and said, "Nix nix,
I wanna stick around a while and get my kicks."
Let's rock Everybody, let's rock.
Everybody in the whole damn block
was dancin' in Jail's House of Rock.
~~~~ ~~~~

Hayate: Okay people, here's the situation - We have an armed and dangerous mage who has held a little girl hostage in the top floor of this hotel...

Subaru: That monster!

Hayate (nodded) : As we speak, the lieutenants are doing their best to resolve negotiations as peacefully as they can.

*BOOM!*

Teana: What was that?!

Hayate: What was what? Anyway, our job here is to forcefully arrest him should matters get too out of hand.

Nanoha: What are our options?

Hayate: Since we have evacuated all the civilians, I say we should set up a sniping post and-

Nanoha: Wait wait wait I don't think-

Hayate: You're right, what if he tries to escape? So lets just blow up the entire flo-

Nanoha: No no! I don't mean-

Hayate: Hmmm, don't want to take any chances huh? I guess I could put in a word with Carim to allow me and the 4 of you to remove the limiters... Cause for some reason I can't see Chrono-kun doing it...

Rein (nodding): He's been alot more up-tight recently...

Nanoha: Hayate-chan....

Subaru (whispering): What about the hostage?

Teana (whispering): I have no idea...

Hayate: Alright lets get to it! Teana, you and Nanoha work out where is the best spot to position yourself-

Fate: Wait, where's Erio and Caro?

Hayate: Oh right! I almost forgot! That brings me to the other problem...

***********************************************

Vita: I said opened up!!!

*Crash!*

Erio: I'm telling you, I can't!

*Smash!*

Signum: You're only making this harder for yourself ...

*Bang!*

Caro: Ano... It's really...

*Boom!*

Vita: Don't worry Caro! We'll get you out of there!

Caro: But...

Signum: Just stay calm...

Erio (thinking): Why doesn't any one believe me?!

Caro: S-Sorry about this

Erio: Caro, why did you set up that emergency "lock-up" barrier? Now they can't get in and they won't listen to us...

Caro: I-I sort of Panicked

Erio: Is there really no way to turn it off?

Caro (shake head) : Not until the timer stop... Which I randomly set in my haste