DISCLAIMER: I don't own Bleach, and never will. It and its characters belong to Tite Kubo. This fanfic was written without bringing any profit in my direction.

Author's notes: I'm not a scholar on the Bleach universe by any means. If there are any errors in my fics (canon, grammatical, or otherwise), please feel free to point them out to me.

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"That," Mastumoto proclaimed to her captain, "is the least likely couple I would have ever imagined." She gestured in a general direction, and it took Hitsugaya a few moments to figure out exactly who she was pointing to. Not because it was hard to figure out precisely who she was referring to, but because her drunken gesture could have pointed to people on either end of the room. After a brief search, his eyes landed on one Shiba Ganju and Yamada Hanataro.

The pair was sitting at a table and chatting, each barely touching their drinks. Hitsugaya got the feeling they were there more to find an excuse to be with each other than to drink. The smaller of the two was slouching forward with his elbows propped on the table, watching and presumably listening to Ganju with a near-constant smile on his face and a flush that could have been from the drink or embarrassment or something else.

The captain of the 10th division made a vague noise and hoped that his lieutenant would drop it. He really wasn't interested in other people's relationships. Besides, knowing their luck (this would be /realism/, not pessimism, thank you) Ganju would to manage to hear a stray comment and want to kick his lieutenant's face in, Yamada protesting or not.

"Really, though!" she gesticulated to get her point across, "It's strange. They're so..." She trailed off.

"Incompatible?" Hitsugaya prompted, taking a sip of his (nonalcoholic) drink.

"No, no," she made what could have been a dismissing motion, but it looked more like she was trying to swat a fly. "They're just..." She fell into silence again.

After a few moments, Hitsugaya resumed trying to not think about anything in particular and give "fuck off" vibes to anyone that thought it would be a good idea to talk to him. He really didn't mind coming along when she drank to make sure she didn't do something stupid (or at least that was why he told himself he came), but the drunken conversation was a bit much.

"Complimentary!" Matsumoto all but screamed, pounded on the table excitedly with a fist, and caused Hitsugaya to nearly jump out of his skin.

After a moment to calm down, "Ah. Yea, that word fits." Ganju's loud, raucous behavior to Hanataro's quiet, polite mannerisms. The Shiba's extroversion (even if it was more rough than friendly) to Yamada's introversion. It made sense in a weird, twisty way that ignored what everyone else thought.

"They're cute," his partner proclaimed, nodding in a self-satisfied way.

Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow and opened his mouth to ask if she had anything to do with them, then thought better of it, saying instead, "'Cute' isn't the word I'd use to describe Ganju."

He let his gaze drift back to Ganju and Hanataro, more out of boredom than any real interest. Ganju had evidently said something that embarrassed the shorter man, if the flush that definitely wasn't from the drink and Ganju's laughter was anything to judge by. When he noticed Hanataro's sheepish look, he reached over, gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder, and said something. Whatever he said caused the medic shinigami to laugh, relax, and give a beaming smile.