It’s
been a year since I last wrote one of these updates.You’d think, therefore, that life had settled into a
boring routine and there wasn’t much to write about.You’d be wrong!

Ironically,
the very day I sent the last update, Chanukah Eve, Friday, December 15th
turned out to be a day of quite major significance for us.Around noon that day I emailed you all an update titled, “Welcome to
the Club”.The main event I wrote
about was that of Etana having a baby and the adjustment of our becoming
grandparents.Though, we felt quite
young to be grandparents we were looking forward to our new role.Well, apparently we were younger than we imagined.

That
evening as I was getting dressed for Shabbat and preparing to enter both Shabbat
and the first night of Chanukah, Randi said she had an early present to give me.Somehow, as she reached in the vanity drawer in the bathroom to retrieve
my “present”, I knew what she was about to hand me; a positive pregnancy
test.All I could do was laugh,
giggle actually.How many times, earlier in our marriage, had we prayed to see
that pink line and now here we were on the precipice of the “next phase”
being, not so subtly reminded, that we can plan all we want to, but G-d gets the
last laugh.

Over the
next few months we would experience quite a range of emotions.Being a “guy” it was much easier for me.I would get the virtual, and sometimes actual, slaps on the back with
that “way to go” attitude.Randi,
on the other hand, had to deal with not only the perception of being a pregnant
grandma, but also the physical reality of being a pregnant grandma.We also had to deal with the concerns of pregnancy in general for Randi,
given her history, combined with the added fear for her and the baby given her
age.But, for the time being this
was going to be our “little” secret as there were other things going on.

Back
around Pesach of 2006 when Elisheva was still an 18-year-old seminary student
she tentatively approached us with the idea of starting to date.Now, “starting to date” can mean different things to different
people.In Elisheva’s world it
meant that she was ready to be fixed up with the real possibility that after
just a few weeks of dating she could become engaged.Truthfully, many of her peers would start dating within 6-12 months
anyway, so it wasn’t really all that early.Elisheva tried to make the point that she was at a competitive
disadvantage dating in Israel.(Something, which we all later realized, may actually have
been an advantage for her.)Still,
we were hesitant, she just seemed so young.That Randi was 19 when she got engaged didn’t seem to matter, since
everyone knows that things were different “back then”.Nevertheless, we gave the go-ahead knowing that it would take some time
just to get the ball rolling.

And
indeed, her first date was not until the following September.As I mentioned, it’s not uncommon for people in Elisheva’s circles to
date for just a few weeks.Well, being Mr. Modern Orthodox, I was going to have none of
that! I told Elisheva that she had to date for at least two months.She dated a couple of guys unsuccessfully during the fall.Soon after Chanuka, while our heads were still spinning from our own new
situation, Elisheva’s seminary principal called to recommend a young man she
thought would be perfect for Elisheva.

The
preliminary investigations went very quickly.(Usually, there’s a CIA level inquiry completed before the two sides
agree to go out.) Elisheva had her first date with Shlomo Storch in the
beginning of January.He impressed
us immediately by renting a car to come pick her up.In a scene out of “Father Knows Best” he sat and
schmoozed with us for a while as Elisheva put the finishing touches on.To make a short story shorter, after just 3 weeks (it was really 2 weeks
but they let me say 3 publicly to save face) Elisheva and Shloimie decided they
wanted to get married and Mr. Big-Shot-At-Least-Two-Months over here caved like
a cheap deck of cards.(Whatever
does that really mean?)

In order
to accommodate Shloimie’s parents, who are both in education and would be
flying in from New Jersey, we decided to have the wedding close to Pesach so
they could maximize their visit by combining it with their Pesach vacation.This gave us just eight weeks to put everything together.Randi’s pregnancy was also a factor in this decision, as we didn’t
want a wedding anywhere near her due date in August.Of course, add to the list for Randi the idea of finding a maternity gown
in which to walk down at your daughter’s wedding!

Sometime
in between the engagement and the wedding we decided to tell the kids about
Randi’s delicate condition.I
used a reference to the movie “Father of the Bride II” to break it to them.(In that movie the mother and daughter are pregnant at the same time.)Etana, was just so Etana.She
got very excited at the thought of she and Randi doing all sorts of fun things
together with their babies.Elisheva,
was excited, supportive and couldn’t wait to tell her new fiancé.Raanan in classic Raanan style just said, “Do you guys KNOW
how old you are?”

We
waited a little longer to tell our “baby” Meira.One Friday night the whole family was eating dinner at Etana and Zev’s
and we tentatively sprung it on her.She
was not initially all that excited.Right
away she realized that she was going to lose the coveted “baby” position in
the family.She even said, “I
thought that I’d always be your baby.” Well Etana lost it, sobbing away, and
the rest of us were a little teary.After
some discussion Meira asked me if I would still call her “baby”.Once I agreed to that condition the excitement of it all began to take
over and she just wanted to tell everyone.

Elisheva’s
wedding was in March and it was beautiful.(If you haven’t seen the short video of the wedding you can do so by
clicking here.)Elisheva looked magnificent and we got ourselves yet another son-in-law
who seems to be hand picked for our daughter.Shloimie quickly became an integral part of our family and in this short
time we already can’t remember what is was like before he was around.

Once
again we are very fortunate that Elisheva, like Etana, married into a wonderful
family with true “Yichus” (important lineage).Shloimie’s family, like Zev’s, spent time in Cleveland and both of
his parents are in education. Shloimie, taking after his mom, is quite musically
talented.We now know that we’ll
have it easy when Raanan is ready to get married.We’ll just go to Cleveland and find a nice girl whose father is a
school principal!

Officially,
on the day of Elisheva’s wedding our Chayal Boded, Tonny, moved into
Elisheva’s room.I think we gave
her a couple days grace time, but basically, as if she had been living in a
hotel, we were telling Elisheva to clear out as we had a reservation for the
next guest.

Ah, so
some of you might be asking, “What is a Chayal Boded”?Literally it means a “single soldier”.The army arranges residences for boys in the army who have no family here
in Israel.It gives the boys a
sense of “home”; a place to keep their stuff, to receive mail, to come to
when they are off duty, to do their laundry, etc.We actually have known Tonny for a few years.He attended a local Yeshiva before joining the army and had been at our
home for many Shabbat meals.As it
turns out, he’s also the step-son of a friend who we’ve known for 30 years.Apparently, that bedroom is a real charm, as Tonny got engaged this
summer and plans to get married in February.

Shortly
after Elisehva’s wedding, Randi had a detailed ultrasound to check the baby.Theoretically this test can detect physical abnormalities that are
indicators for certain genetic defects.Our
main concern was that of Down syndrome, the odds of which increase dramatically
with maternal age.(And as Randi
reminded me, studies are showing with paternal age as well!) Then again, for
some reason, Randi worried about Down syndrome with all of our children, even
when she was a young spring chicken!An
Obstetric Radiologist performed this type of special ultrasound so we didn’t
have to wait for results.Right
away he said, “Hakol B’sedar”, everything looks fine.

We
actually relaxed a little.Even
though Randi was once again suffering from gestational diabetes, the diet she
needed to be on as a result had her looking terrific.Etana and Zev were living around the corner, so we got to see them and
Donniel Moshe nearly on a daily basis.Like
his mom and dad, Donniel is a bundle of energy and such a joy to spend time
with.Elisheva and Shloimie were
settling into their new life in their fourth floor walk-up in the Ramat Eshkol
neighborhood of Jerusalem.Raanan
was doing well in school and Meira couldn’t wait to start Kita Alef (first
grade).

Because
of her age and history Randi was switched to a high-risk obstetrician.(This is something she can’t blame in MY age!)He recommended, and we were glad he did, that for several reasons it
would be wise for Randi to have a scheduled c-section.As a result her appointments and ultrasounds became more frequent.

Etana,
Zev, and Donniel’s sojourn in Beit Shemesh came to abrupt end in June.Zev had taken a new job as sales manager with a company that sells moving
services in the U.S. Since Zev was working until well past midnight in
Jerusalem, they felt it would be better for them to move to the Holy City.So, like the Tasmanian whirlwind that IS Zev and Etana, within in a week
or so they had found an apartment and moved.

Randi
was having routine ultrasounds every two weeks.At an ultrasound around a month before the baby was due, the technician
pointed out to us the baby’s femur was starting to measure shorter than
normal.Of course we did what all
good patients today do.We ran
right to the internet.What we
learned was that this short femur could mean anything from Down syndrome to
dwarfism.Of course after digging a
bit, I discovered what it mostly meant was nothing, i.e. most fetuses with short
femurs are born perfectly normal.Subsequent
ultrasounds and conversations with the doctor proved to be totally confusing so
we decided to stop the ultrasounds as, at this point, there was really nothing
they could do but worry us.Faced
with the idea of having a child with dwarfism Randi was beginning to think that
Down syndrome didn’t look all that bad.

The
c-section was scheduled for July 16th, Rosh Chodesh Av.(No choice to do it earlier or much later.)We had hired an obstetrician privately (not uncommon) to handle the
surgery.Though we were told to be at the hospital at 8:00 a.m., like
a backed up runway at JFK, we waited in “line” for hours as about 10
scheduled and unscheduled c-sections preceded us.

Finally,
Randi was prepped for surgery with a local anesthetic. She remained awake, if
not woozy. I was seated safely next to Randi’s head behind a divider that
prevented me from seeing her guts on display as I nervously waited to hear that
first cry.After a few minutes of
jostling and suctioning sounds the doctor held up my new son, still attached to
his umbilical cord.He looked
pretty gross, as do most babies who are covered with blood and guts, and yet
beautiful at the same time.

Right
away I noticed that they appeared to be doing a little more with him than the
typical apgar testing. (His apgar was 9/9!) Specifically, the pediatrician
seemed to be checking his muscle tone by flopping him around like a rag doll.At the same time the nurse quietly said to me, “did your wife have a
skira”.(That’s the Hebrew word for the detailed ultrasound she had
several months earlier.)Well
I didn’t have to be Sherlock Holms to figure out what was going on.When I went over to look at the baby, the doctor asked me, pointing to
his beautiful almond-shaped eyes, “Do your other children look like this?”Being the nice guy I am I didn’t say out loud what I was thinking,
which was, “No, moron, my other kids don’t have Down syndrome!”I immediately looked at his palm and sure enough he had a simian crease,
an almost certain marker for Down syndrome.

Even
though I knew the answer, I asked this Russian pediatrician if he thought that
my son had Down syndrome.His reply
was, “Well he’s not going to be the smartest kid in the class.” (I
guess it’s all relative, we’ll just see about that!)I went over to Randi and whispered to her, “He has Downs.” She said,
“OK” as if she had known all along.

As soon
as he was cleaned up I asked to hold him.The
moment I held him, I felt my prior expectations shift to accommodate this new
reality. That seemed to surprise the staff!Before being whisked off to recovery, Randi gave our son a
kiss and told him she loved him.They
really didn’t know what to do with us.It
seems that their standard protocol is to say as little as possible so as not to
upset the parents.But we weren’t
upset.We had discussed this
possibility.We loved him just as
we had loved each of our newborn children. We were fine, we were going to be
fine, and we wanted to make sure everyone knew that from day one.

For
reasons unknown to us, we believe, at this stage in our lives G-d chose to give
us this gift, which will require some special care on our part.We just pray we are up to the challenge.

The
timing of the birth couldn’t have been better for us.I was off from Yeshiva for a month.And there was a lot to do!Since the surgery was on Monday, Randi was able to be home for the Shalom
Zachor, which I think she wouldn’t have missed even if the baby had been born
on Friday afternoon!Since Raanan
was born during the week of a Shabbos Yom Kippur, this was going to be our first
Shalom Zachor.And it didn’t
disappoint.It was a beautiful
symphony of friends, family, singing and divrei Torah.

After a
little concern about jaundice, the bris was done on time.There are pictures
and video on the
lipkinfamily.com web site.We named
him Yisrael Simcha.We chose the
name Yisrael because he is the only one of our children to have the honor of
being born in Israel.Also, there
was a great Rabbi who lived in the 1800’s who was known as Yisrael Salanter.He’s called Salanter because he was from Salant, but his real last name
was Lipkin.Though we are not
descended from him, we thought it would be a special merit for our son to carry
his name.We chose the second name
Simcha, meaning Joy or Happiness, so that he will always know that he brought
Simcha into our lives.

After a
month focused mainly on Yisrael it was time for me and Raanan to go back to
Yeshiva and for Meira to begin Kita Alef.She
was so excited.We chose a school
located in Ramat Beit Shemesh called Ahavat Yisrael (Rappaport).It is a religious public school which we feel has a good blend of
Religious Zionist philosophy and strict adherence to religious values.From Meira’s point of view it’s a lot of fun.

Unbelievably,
Raanan began his Senior year.We
are very proud of how he’s grown and adapted to our new environment.As the year progresses he will be faced with a major life decision in
what to do next year.Does he go to a religiously right-wing Yeshiva where
army service is shunned or does he go to a Hesder Yeshiva were army is
integrated into the program?This
is truly his decision and I suggest you not ask him what he’s decided if you
know what’s good for you.Regardless
of what he chooses next year he still had to go through the army induction
process when he turned 17.He went
down to the draft center, had his physical and took various tests.I guess he did ok as he now receives an endless stream of
recruitment mail from various army-related institutions.

Elisheva
completed her course in computer graphics in June and, after spending several
months looking for that all-important “first job”, decided to settle for a
job working as an office manager for a PC repair business.The good news for us is that her new job is located right down the street
from us here in Beit Shemesh.So we
get to see her quite often.

In yet
another flash Etana and Zev have moved yet again.Though their last apartment was well located in Jerusalem,
there really was no community for them in the neighborhood they were in.That, combined with having a landlord from hell (so much so that it got
to the point where Etana was afraid to be in the apartment without Zev being
there) prompted them to look elsewhere.About
a month ago they moved into a very nice apartment in the town of Neve Daniel
which is located in the Gush region.Zev’s
sister lives next door. It’s about 25 minutes from us and about 15 minutes
from Jerusalem.

Randi
decided not to go back to work this year.It
basically came down to doing therapy for other people’s special kids (for not
so much money) or giving Yisrael Simcha her full attention, which as it turns
out is a full time job.

The
services provided here are excellent. When Yisrael was 6 weeks old he began a
program at Shalva.Shalva is a privately funded organization with a facility in Har Nof,
Jerusalem that provides a range of services for special needs children.In the “Me and My Mommy” program that Yisrael attends once a week he
receives massage therapy, physical therapy, speech therapy, and hydro therapy.He occasionally spends time in the Cheder Lavan (literally
white room, also known as a Snoezelen
room) which is a really cool room that provides him with multi-sensory
stimulation.In a short time he
will also begin occupational therapy and computer therapy (I think they’ll be
teaching .NET programming.) This will continue, free of charge, until he is two
years old.In addition our Kupa
(health insurance company) provides him with physical and speech therapy.And just in case you thought he wasn’t busy enough, Randi also brings
Yisrael to an occupational therapist who is trained in a unique and innovative
therapy known as “Medek”.

As
you’ve read and heard, we really have had so much blessing since we moved
here; weddings, grandchild, children, a great community with wonderful friends,
and the special merit of living in Eretz Yisrael.

This is
a “Shmita” year in Israel.The
Torah mandates that every seven years the land is to lie fallow and not be
cultivated.The produce that does
grow during this year is considered ownerless.Of course being a country full of Jews there are many opinions on exactly
how this law is to be observed in today’s modern world where the Temple is not
yet the center of Jewish life here.There
is rarely a Shabbos meal that goes by that this is not a hot topic of
discussion. This, of course is a great thing as at least it guarantees that
we’re talking about a Torah topic.

Without
getting too into the details, the way we’ve chosen to observe Shmita results
in some of the produce we eat being classified as having “Kedushat Shviit”
(holiness of the seventh year).Practically,
since this food is considered holy, it means that we cannot treat it degradingly
by throwing it directly into the garbage. We must first set it aside to decay on
its own for a few days, and then we can wrap it separately and throw it away.

The
reason I’m giving you this Shmita lesson is to share with you the wonderful
feeling as a parent to see your child actualize the performance of Mitzvot
unique to Israel. Earlier in the year Meira came home from school and excitedly
handed me a ball of tin foil.Inside,
were the remnants of her tomato sandwich. She immediately informed me that I
must be careful to put the tomatoes in our special “Pach Shmitta” (a
container we designated for this produce).Also, Randi recently poured some water into a potted plant we have
outside the front door.Meira saw
this and started questioning Randi as to whether or not she should have been
watering the plant during Shmita.A
kid in America may learn about Shmita in school, but the kids here are, like so
many mitzvot unique to our Homeland, actually living it!