>Confessions of a Fat Admirer. The Dean of Feederism Comes Clean.

First off let me publicly apologize to Fat Bastard and my girlfriend Thinnettte. I have been a real asshole to both of you. Fat Bastard is like more than a brother to me. He is part of me. When I saw that Fat Bastard my hero, my friend and my kindred spirit was mortal I panicked. Seeing your hero with tubes sticking out of him all battered and bruised is devastating. I was angry with Fat Bastard for almost dying. When Fat Bastard dies a part of me will die and I needed to come to terms with that. What helped me deal with it was the wise words of Reverend Big Lardass and his assurance that Fatlings like Fat Bastard will be immortal in fatling heaven. Thank you Reverend.

I have put Thinnette through hell. Thinnette is the only woman I have ever loved and at times it scared the hell out of me. I have porked hundreds and hundreds of fat girls and I have boned a few thin chicks but Thinnette is the first woman I have actually made love to. That feeling was more potent than I could have ever imagined. It was overwhelming and totally against the person I thought I was. So here I am having an identity crisis and a spiritual crisis all at the same time but it gets even worse. I also was still fighting my fetish for porking porkers. For me resisting a fat slut would be like a starved fatling trying to resist a cheese cake. The task was monumental. I kept bringing home nasty yeast infections to Thinnette who had never has a yeast infection in her life. Even if you use a condom and shower thoroughly fat girls have so much yeast not only in the crotches but in their folds that you need to soak in Cruex and bleach to get it all.

I saw a therapist and had aversion therapy so that I would stop porking fat girls. CG Brady warned me and said that while it works it has some unwanted side effects. He was right. Not only did I have an aversion for fat girls I had an aversion for all fatlings, even fat kids. I felt ashamed because my best friend in the whole world is Fat Bastard. I felt worse than ever. After reading some of Teddy’s and the Good Reverend’s wise and kind words I decided to contact our friend and sometimes adversary CG Brady to undo what Dr Evil had done to me with his aversion therapy. Dr Brady’s methods were effective. Now I am still turned on by fat girls but not nearly as much as I was and when I think about their yeasty maw and the hurt I put Thinnette through I become ambivalent. Thank you Dr Brady and thank you for your flexible payment plan.

I am not out of the “Tiger Woods” yet and this mia culpa won’t means squat if I backslide. I cannot apologize enough to Fat Bastard and Thinnette. I can only try to make it up to them as best I can. I cannot thank Fat Bastard, Thinnete, Fat Bastard’s sister Gwen, Teddy, Dr Brady and the Rev enough even if I lived 10 lifetimes. All I can say is thank you, thank you, thank you.

While it is still OK to appreciate fat girls as an object of erotic art I can no longer lust for them. This will be tough for me because of my long history of porking fat girls. The fact is even the sluttiest fat girl is no match for Thinnette in the sack. Thinnette has enough stamina to keep up with even me and as you all know my NAAFA porkathons were legendary. Fat Bastard has long extolled the sexual prowess and consideration of skinny women and I never really got it until I met Thinnette. She’s had to scrape me off the ceiling more than a few times. The only thing that fat girls may be better at is giving head. A lot of guys say that.

Thinette is the love of my life!

Fat girls like the ones I was porking behind Thinnette back can be brutal sluts. Sure the wanted to get porked by me but they also wanted to hurt Thinnette. They are a competitive and catty bunch. They want everyone they work with to be fatter than them so that they won’t be the fattest. If you are thin like Thinnettte and you are the only thin one among a pod of fat girls you a like a wounded fish. The following describes how Thinnette felt when she was younger.

All my life I’ve been skinny. It’s not my fault; I haven’t done anything to become this way. I’m an active girl, I have a high metabolism. But I eat a lot and I’ve never once attempted to lose weight by starving myself or throwing up.

Skinny girls have body issues too. I’ve been accused of being anorexic and bulimic several times. I’ve been denied the right to hanging out with one of my best friends because I was a “bad influence”. Her mom wrongfully assumed I had an eating disorder.

It seems like everyone is striving for skinny, but skinny isn’t all that great. Skinny makes me self conscious. Girls I’ve known forever comment on how thin I am and either say they wish they were this skinny or that I need some meat on my bones. People attempt to feed me. They tell me to eat steak, they come up with these plans to make me gain weight.

“I EAT!” I want to scream at them. I eat as much as everyone else, more even! Every time I’ve gone to the doctor they tell me I’m healthy. They tell me I’m normal. I’m fine. There’s nothing wrong with me and I don’t need food shoved down my throat, thank you.

Then there’s the “curvy” girls. “Guys like curves. They don’t like stick thin girls.”

When people say that it pretty much just means to me “guys don’t like you, Morgan”. I’m well aware that I’m not exactly eye catching to the guys. I don’t need to be reminded every day that my body isn’t perfect. I’m alright with my body some days but there are others when I wish I had boobs and a butt and those “curves” that everyone seems to love.

Everyone is a little insecure sometimes, but it never seems to help that people talk about me having an eating disorder or say things about guys not liking skinny girls. Why is it that when normal girls think they’re fat everyone tells them “oh it’s ok, you’re not fat, you’re fine!” yet when it’s me that’s feeling insecure there’s nothing but mean comments? If I tell people I don’t like being skinny they don’t tell me that I’m fine the way I am, they get mad and tell me that I should feel lucky to be skinny. But people of all sizes have insecurities.

I want to like my body and I want to be happy with the way I am. I am happy sometimes; I don’t feel I need to gain weight, and I probably won’t. But it’s hard sometimes to hear the things people say about me and skinny girls in general. I’m insecure. But I guess I’m fine how I am and I don’t need to change. There are so many different body types and I guess I got the skinny type. I just wish other people could accept that, too.

I was a size bigot. I only porked fat girls and I never stopped to think how shallow I was being because I was brainwashed by the old fat acceptance fat girl sophistries that said that fat girls are the only victims of size discrimination. That may have been true when fat girls were a small minority but it has not been true for a very long time in spite of what the old dying FA movement would like you to believe.

As Thinnette got older the cruel taunts and the shunning she got for being lean only made her stronger. Men liked her better and not just for her looks. They liked the fact that she was not some big fat drama queen and that really drove the fat girls nuts. By me porking them I could have wounded Thinnette in unfathomable ways.

There you have it friends and readers of Bigger Fatter Blog. I’m back and I am going to redouble my efforts and focus like a laser beam on my work with NAFAM and NIFAM and promote the joys of morbid obesity and hyper gluttony advance fat acceptance into the next decade.