Allow us a pull quote: “These include the Balsa River, a lazy ride ideal for the lazy child wanting to practice his or her lazy sprawl, which will be perfected 15 years later somewhere in the abyss of the living-room couch.”

“The King Pilipit, a swirling slide that is under rising pressure until a final drop dumps you in a pool, is the perfect place to test if sewing your passport into your appendix keeps it safe.”