ocPortal version 9 announced - partnering with MI6

Thanks to a first-of-its-kind technology-sharing agreement between ocProducts and MI6, ocPortal version 9 will come equipped with a suite of add-ons and tools designed to help keep your website, and the rest of the world, incredibly safe and secure.

Reinventing CAPTCHA

ocPortal version 9 will reinvent the notion of user confirmation with its next generation of audio and visual CAPTCHAs. Gone are the days of blurry, scrambled letters - now you can use your eyes and ears the way they were meant to be used.

Audio-CAPTCHAs

Your users will be played two short audio recordings (of tapped phone calls and intercepted radio transmissions) streamed directly from MI6's secure servers in London. Then, they must select which recording is most likely to contain a terrorist transmission. The results will be sent to MI6's headquarters and double-checked by a trained analyst. Within a matter of minutes/hours, your users will be allowed passed the CAPTCHA form, safe in the knowledge that they have helped thwart terrorism.

Examples include:

Media
Media

ocProducts reserves the right to accept any monetary reward, for the capture of any terror suspects, on your or your users' behalf.

Visual-CAPTCHAS

Your users will be shown two images, and must answer a security-related question in order to pass the CAPTCHA form. Again, the results will be sent to MI6 for analysis.

Examples include:

Theme Wizard threat level

It's important that we all remain vigilant in times of heightened security. That's why ocPortal's Theme Wizard will automatically alter the colour of your website's theme when Britain's current threat level is changed. Now you and your visitors will always know if it's safe to go outside.

For example, if the threat level is increased to 'critical', then your website may automatically look like this:

Weather block

When MI6 decides their mission schedules, they take the weather very seriously, and now your users can too. With ocPortal's enhanced weather block, you and your users will be always have the latest weather information at their fingertips. Using a datalink between MI6's weather satellites and your website, you'll be able to display the weather for any location (including all major population centres, deserts, and pre-identified training camps) up to 100 days in advance.

Find my website

When protecting their property, people regularly forget that it isn't just physical objects that can be stolen - websites can too. With ocPortal's new 'find my website' add-on, you'll always have peace of mind that your website is right where you left it. Tying your ocPortal website into MI6's Enhanced Latitude/Longitude IP Security Information System (ELLIPSIS) will allow you to track the location of your website 24/7 with their Goldeneye satellites, so you'll know if it ever leaves the data centre.

Profile picture analysis

ocPortal's member profiles were dramatically redesigned for version 8, and now we're taking them even further. Whenever a profile picture or an avatar is changed, the photo will be cross-referenced with MI6's 'most wanted' list. If a match is found, that member will be automatically banned, and their details sent to MI6.

Embracing HTML5

ocPortal will continue to embrace HTML5 by removing support for all mouse gestures and keyboard shortcuts in favour of modern equivalents. ocPortal will now use HTML5's audio-input APIs to allow you and your users to whistle instructions to your website using popular encryption methods such as Morse-code. For example: -… .- -. .-. — -… -… .. . –. — .- -.-. …. . .-.

ocMonarchy

The ocMonarchy add-on will insert the following HTML tag into your website's source code: <meta name="authority" content="Queen of England" />. This is to ensure you can feel safe and secure with Her Majesty at the <head> of every website.

We couldn't be more excited about ocPortal version 9, and we hope you'll be willing to help us create a more secure and safe Internet for everyone. ocPortal version 9 will be released on the 26th October 2012, but we're opening up a total of 007 beta-testing slots for our valued forum members. If you would like to apply for a testing slot, please sign up here and make your applications out for the attention of Miss. Moneypenny.

It turns out to be a lot more confusing than one might think. Any combination of 3 dots (…) are turned into an 'ellipsis' which can, for example, turn the letter H into S+E. Any combination of 2 or more dashes conspires to interpret it as an 'm-dash'. And so on and so forth.

Got there in the end, but had to turn up the screen magnification, and even then I had to guess at a few …!!