Summary:
For
three years he had been gone, and he returned to another world. In
this alien planet, she'd fallen in love with someone he loved; and
he had loved them enough to have stepped aside.

Blair
moved around the counter and handed the glass to her husband, who
thanked her with a moist kiss on her cheek. She smiled up at him,
then excused herself politely, nodding at the man who Nate had been
discussing their finances with. She turned around and walked back to
the kitchen, then wiped her palm over the moist trace of her
husband's kiss. At the sight, Blair stopped at the entry way.

There
he was, sipping a glass of scotch, watching her from behind hooded
eyes.

"Look
at me, Blair."

She
stiffened at the sound of his voice. His voice was one of those
things she remembered late at night in her bed, while another man's
body pressed against her back and she still felt so cold. His voice
washed over her, and Blair closed her eyes and breathed deeply as if
she could inhale his voice until it pumped through her veins and she
would never do without it.

Blair
reached for a glass of water and sipped at it.

"You
can't do it, can you?" he demanded.

She took deep
calming breaths. Blair went over to the sink to place her glass
there. The help would arrive soon, and they would wash the glass and
place it back in its place. It wasn't as if it was dirty, but Blair
wanted it washed anyway. There might be a faint trace of her lipgloss
on the rim, and that was just disgusting. Blair waited for him to
move aside, to allow her space to pass. "I need to get this
washed," she murmured, addressing him for the first time.

"It's
perfectly clean," he whispered

He ran his fingers through
his hair. "Why won't you talk to me?"

She
refused to meet his gaze. "Let me go," she whispered.

His
nostrils flared. He gently took his hands off her. Blair moved past
him, and the space he gave her was so narrow that her body pressed
against him for a few brief moments. "It's not that easy."
He looked up and saw that her eyes regarded him sadly.

Once
upon a time, eight years ago to be exact, he told her, in front of
dozens of people, that true love meant never giving up. But over the
years they had faltered and believed that they'd forgotten that
speech. For three years he had been gone, and he returned to another
world. In this

alien
planet, she'd fallen in love with someone he loved; and he had
loved them enough to have stepped aside.

"It's not our
fault," he told her, but they both knew that it was.

i
"You can still back out," he whispered into her ear.

Blair
glared at him from under her veil as she fitted her wedding
dress."Last night was a mistake," she growled. "I cannot
believe you, Chuck. You just had to come back to be a best man and
you already seduced me."

"Maybe
that should give you a clue. Don't marry Nathaniel, Blair. You're
just being unfair to him."

"Do
you know what kind of scandal that's going to make? I'm getting
married tomorrow!"/i

"I'm
saying it now," he choked out. "I'm still in love with you."
He had loved her enough that as suddenly as he'd returned, he was
gone again. She blinked against the stinging pain in her eyes. That
allowed the tears to slide down her cheeks. He caught one with his
finger and brought it to his lips. "I hate seeing you cry."

Blair turned her face away, because the sensation of his skin
on hers killed her. "I won't do it to him again."

iHe
bent down and kissed the crook of her neck. His hand made its way to
her breast and cupped, massaging it until her nipple was peaked. He
backed her towards the window. They were soon engulfed by the thick
curtains until they were almost invisible if not for their frantic
motions.

"Should
we really be doing this?"

"He's
not here."

Blair
arched her back and moaned when she felt his hot lips right on the
pulse under her ear. Chuck pushed her panties aside, not even
bothering to take them off of her. Blair returned the frantic motion
by pushing his pants down on his hips.

"Blair."
He hesitated, and looked up into her eyes. She nodded to say it was
okay and to his brain, it made it sound as if it really would be
fine. He intertwined his fingers with hers and held on, feeling the
diamond of her engagement ring cutting into his flesh. He drove home.
She gasped and he squeezed his eyes tightly, his hips moving in a
frantic rhythm.

"Chuck,
more," she gasped. She wanted to wrap her arms around him, rest her
hands on his shoulders and rub the tension that she felt. Instead,
his hands were tight as they clutched hers and pressed them against
the moist glass. The edges of her vision blacked and she released so

violently
she shuddered and screamed quietly, melting against the window,
against his body, liquefied.

As
she sagged against him, Chuck released her hand and felt it go around
his back, clutching at him, her nails sliding against the sweat. With
his free hand he reached for her other thigh and placed her leg
around his waist. With the new depth, he felt her grow tighter and
even slicker. He rested his forehead against the cool window and
pounded faster and heavier. /i

When
she passed by him again, he closed his eyes and reveled in her scent.
She heard him suck his breath at that exact moment when their bodies
mashed together so completely, so tightly. Her blood pumped in her
temples then, and her heightened awareness of her entire body
blackened her sight. They were pressed together only for that
millisecond, but it was enough to send her temperature to fever
pitch, to suck the strength from her limbs. And then he closed his
arms around her.

"Don't,"
she whispered.

"Please,"
was his response.

And
for a long moment, they held on to each other in the secret of the
kitchen, while her husband laughed and conversed in the other room.
Her face pressed into his chest, his nose buried in her hair, they
stood in the quiet.

"Blair!"
Nate's voice floated to her ears amidst the pulsing thunder of her
heart. Nate appeared in the doorway with a screaming toddler in his
arms. The nanny stood right behind him. Nate paused and just looked
at them, at the small distance between their bodies, his best
friend's slow, heavy, calming breathing and his wife's red-rimmed
eyes. Chuck saw Nate's throat working. Then Nate blinked, and he
regarded them cheerfully. "Look what happened to our angel, Blair."

She
stiffly walked over to take the crying baby from Nate. "Did she
disturb your deal?"

Nate
leaned down and placed a kiss on his wife's temple, then looked
down fondly at mother and daughter. "Not possible. But I thought
she might want her mom." Nate watched Chuck carefully, before
turning around and going back to the living room.

Chuck
walked over to her and watched as the child screamed, and Blair
rubbed calming circles on her back. The child relaxed against Blair's
chest, still sniffling. She looked up at him, and saw him staring at
them in wonder. Blair held the baby to him. "Hold her for me."

And
when he did, tears rose in her eyes. It was awkward, risky, and
absolute perfection. Even her daughter must have felt how right it
was, because even the untutored rocking calmed her and the baby
slept. She whispered for the nanny to leave.

"Nate's
right. She's an angel. I couldn't survive every day without her."

"Leave
with me," he pleaded. "We'll be a family."

Temptation
whispered into her ear, but she could only say, "He loves me."

"What
do you think I feel about you?" he demanded. "What do you think
you feel about me?"

"I-"
she gasped, "I don't."

"Don't lie," he
whispered softly into her ear.

Blair took the baby back from
him. Chuck felt the distinct emptiness of his arms without the child.
"Please," she said, "let go."

"Don't you think
I've tried? I've been trying since that night."

Blair
winced and looked away, unwilling to listen to him mention that she
had spent her wedding night with him. She never learned. She went
over to the stairs and felt him following closely behind. Blair
entered the baby's room and placed her in the bed.

"I
just can't," he admitted, standing behind her so close he could
see her hair moving with his every breath.

Blair
turned around. She placed her hands on his chest, patted the lapels
of his shirt, then sighed. Blair glanced at the sleeping baby, then
back up into his eyes. She pulled him down, and hungrily he took her
lips. Tears seeped out of her closed eyelids as she drank in the
taste of him. She was starving for him. His tongue meeting hers sent
an electric surge through his veins. Instead of the rough plunging he
had been used to, theirs melded together in a no less tumultuous way.
It was a fierce kiss, but not brutal, ardent, yet calm. "Why?"
she asked, when they were staring at each other, gasping in the
aftermath.

"I don't know."

Her hand rose to
cup his cheek, and he immediately turned his face to kiss her palm.

She looked up at him with liquid eyes and pale, pale lips. "I
can't go."

He looked at her unblinking, his breathing
steady. His eyes. Always, his stare. It was that look that sent her
into his arms long ago, that same look that had her betraying Nate
for the umpteenth time.

She
turned her face away. Blair did not see him leave the room. She
closed her eyes and sat on the carpet by her daughter's bed. And
then she was being enveloped into a warm embrace. She opened her eyes
and found herself in her husband's arms.

"Did
you tell him?" he asked gently.

Blair
clutched at Nate's shoulders as she shook her head. "He doesn't
need to know."

"It
can work, Blair."

She
took a deep breath. When Bart Bass had told them that he was sending
back for Chuck, she should have expected him. It was her own fault
that she hadn't been prepared to face him.

"He
deserves to know," Nate told her.

"I'm
not putting him through that again. You saw him then, Nate. And that
was his mother. What do you think he's going to do when it's—"

The
baby was crying now. Nate stood up and picked up the dark-haired
little girl and rocked her against his body.
He extended a hand to help Blair up.

Blair
took Nate's hand and pulled herself up. She placed a hand on her
daughter's back.

"He
deserves to be with her no matter how long it's gonna be for." He
pushed one lock of her hair behind her ear. "Sooner or later, he's
going to notice. You can't use me as your reason forever."

"Nate,
I've done everything else perfectly," she said, her voice full of
her plea.

i
"Nate,
Nate, Nate!" she cried, grasping at his jacket when he turned to
leave.

He
stopped, turned around and looked down at Blair Waldorf. She did not
look like Blair, nor did she sound like Blair. His ex-fiance looked
up at him in tears, her mascara running down her cheeks. She had
stuck a knife in his gut on the day they were supposed to get
married, and now… But just like he could not help it then, he was
still ever going to be hers.

"Please,
Nate."

"Have
you tried calling him?" he asked calmly. She nodded furiously.
"What did his father say?"

"Nobody
knows where he is."

And
for all the mature posturing she had done, she was still a little
girl scared most of all by the humiliation of having her stellar
reputation trampled. "Blair, you live in the twenty-first century.
This isn't going to destroy you."

And
she sobbed, then covered her face with her trembling hands. "I know
that I don't have the right to ask."

"You
left me at the altar," he stated, reminding her of the reason why
he couldn't—and shouldn't—agree.

"I'm
so sorry." And then she looked up at him again, her eyes raw, her
cheeks flushed, her lips with a tinge of blue. "I swear, Nate, if
you do this for me, I will be everything you want to be. I'll be
perfect. I'll never fight with you. I won't say a word if you
have another woman on the side. You can use all my money for any
business you need to use it for. I'll support you in every way
possible," she enumerated desperately. "Marry me."

She
reminded him of a child promising to be good. Nate shook his head and
wrapped his arms around her tightly. "Don't cry."

"Will
you do it, Nate? I'll love you forever," she promised.

Nate
buried his face in her ear and took a deep breath. Chuck was bound to
show up soon. He would never abandon Blair like this, without a word,
without a note. Chuck couldn't—not after getting Blair Waldorf to
break her engagement on her wedding day.

She
pulled away from him suddenly and ran towards the bathroom. He heard
the dry heaving from the bedroom. /i

Nate
held the baby closer to him, then smiled down at her upon seeing that
the child was blinking up at him. "I love you, Lottie," he said,
greeting the little girl and assuring her that nothing was amiss. He
returned his attention to Blair, and her teary doe eyes. "I can't
live like this anymore, Blair. Especially not now that he's back."

Blair
reached for her daughter and held her close, then turned her back on
Nate. She would deal with the fallout when it happens. Knowing Nate,
this would blow over soon, and he would reconsider. She hoped to
heaven it did. Softly, she sang, "Hush little baby, don't you
cry…"

tbc

The author would like to thank you for your continued support. Your review has been posted.