"Catch me first and then I’ll let go…"

(A short dramatic performance by HH Kadamba Kanana Swami at the Sunday Feast in Pretoria, South Africa, 20 September 2009…)

So we are afraid, we are very afraid. Sometimes to make the Sunday Feast a little more light, a little more entertaining, I do a little dramatic performance for the audience. And I’ll do it again today, although it’s not completely new maybe to some, but still I’ll do it. This one I will do standing on the vyasasana- I don’t need any partners Gaura, I’ll do it alone (Laughter). (Maharaja stands on vyasasana- laughter)

So, the roof is leaking. My house is not in a very good condition, what to do! So I decided that I would finally fix it today. So I’m standing here on the roof, right. Even above the trees (Tulasi devi)! It’s quite high up here. There’s lots of water clogged up in the drain (Maharaja’s cup of water), so I better watch out! (Laughter). Anyway, so here on this roof I’m at work. And just as I was at work…(Maharaja raises voice) suddenly my foot slipped and I just went down the roof and I was about to fall and I managed to grab the edge…!!! Oh God! Saved! Oh, wooh! Saved!Then I try to pull myself up on the edge of the roof…but, you know, because of all the maha prasadam (laughter)…and lack of exercise, it’s not so easy (Maharaja tries to hold on ‘roof’), it’s like I try to get my leg over the edge but unfortunately, I was hanging there and didn’t manage. So then it began to dawn upon me, that how long can I hang here! How long, how long can I hold on to this edge of the roof! So I’m sweating, I’m praying, ‘God, God, oh God, please help me…’

(Maharaja plays double roles: man hanging at edge of roof andGod)

From behind a voice, ‘need any help?’(Man) ‘Who are you?’(God) ‘I am God!’(Man) ‘Oh God, please help me, (screams) please help me!’(God) ‘No problem; just let go off the roof and I will catch you.’(Man) ‘Uh…can’t you catch me first? And then I’ll let go…’

(Laughter)

Thank you very much.

(Applause)

Yes, so this point ‘can’t you catch me first? Then I will let go’ this is really the mentality. ‘Yes, yes, I’ll surrender. But first You give me everything- all the mercy, all the nectar and then I’ll let go- I promise You…’ No; Krsna’s says, ‘you let go first. First you let go and then I’ll catch you.’ This is dangerous huh? This is our problem that we say, ‘uh well…that’s okay. We’re hanging there, we’re looking how many meters is it? what if He doesn’t catch me? Then it would be a big fall.’ And in this way we are hesitant, always hesitant. But it’s the acaryas, it is the spiritual masters- all the great devotees- that can give us the courage. And we see that they have shown such extraordinary faith, such courage, such determination; where they’d got it? Where they’d got it from? So we’re looking at saintly persons because through saintly persons we ourselves get the courage in determination. Alone we don’t get. Therefore in spiritual life alone, one doesn’t come very far. One must, Mahajano yena gatah sa panthah (Cc. Madhya 17.186), one must follow in the footsteps of the Mahajanas. That is the way, that is the process…