On Valentines day I was invited to go see a performance at a school. I showed up and realized it wasn’t just a bunch of little kids performing something cute… It was young women performing poetry and monologues bringing awareness to violence to women around the world. While it was a bit of a recalibration to realize the topic was so deep and painful, it was inspiring and eye opening.

I am sending you a lot of love as we move from summer into fall (or winter into spring, depending on where you are in the world).

People have been asking me when the Trauma Series I have been developing will be ready - I'm excited to share with you that it's coming soon and will be here at the end of October (just about in time for Halloween...).

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about all those unconscious ways our bodies try to help us out. Even when we think they’re doing the opposite. In this Vlog, I share about something I’ve noticed in my own life around how often when there’s been any kind of friction (or a tiny glimpse that friction could be there), my body sometimes goes into an unconscious pain reaction. Well… not so unconscious anymore… busted!

I REALLY disappoint people. Sometimes I feel like A SUPER BIG DISAPPOINTMENT. Sometimes I really let people down. Piss people off. People feel hurt and misunderstood by me. It used to feel like death to me when I let people down. I LITERALLY wanted to die. Over something as simple as messing up the flavor of ice cream they asked me to pick up for them. The thought of not getting it perfect made my knees shake and my gut rot.

Over time, I learned it’s not that I am a disappointment, it’s that I disappoint people sometimes.

It is the end of week 1 of 4 in the Mexican jungle with nearly 50 women. 3 weeks to go, each new group of 50 women. Stunned. Awed. Grateful. I am feeling wild and on a mission.

These women come here as we support them through many processes, and layer by layer they melt away so much shame, conditioning, fear and grief - all the ways they’ve been taught to be small and less alive.

One of the ways we do this is through celebration and permission and invitations to allow every woman to be FULLY themselves in every moment. In blissful pleasure, in dark frightened shadows, in sheer contentment, in perfectionism and control, in quietness, in loudness, and everything in between.

Celebrating each other and ourselves is NOT something most of us has been taught. The power of truly giving ourselves and each other permission and saying yes is revolutionary.

Who would you be if nothing was wrong? This is a question I ask myself from time to time. It’s a therapeutic question I drop in there from time to time because my habitual thinking tendency is to look for what’s wrong - it’s a way I survived. It’s a way I made sure to keep track of anything that could go wrong, so I could get away from it or fix it or protect myself in some way if I needed to.

If you didn't see my first post from last week titled, "Fight for Me", go back and start there. This is the second part of that where we'll dig deeper into how to identify what you are feeling and why. We'll start with the following questions.

This may resonate with you if are one of those people that perpetually feels dumbfounded standing there with your heart wide open and willing after someone who has been calling for your attention over and over again only to find them not quite as “there” as the seemed before.

I've been unraveling lately. Pulling apart the loose threads that make me who I am. Who I am. Who I am is a construct of ideas, beliefs, thoughts. Not tangible things to hold. Nothing with weight or grit or substance. Simply electrical impulses, grooves in the the brain, in yoga, we call these Samskaras. And mine were deep and had roots and limbs and Octopus suction cups. But now "who I am" is more like an old cloth, thin from wear, soft, changeable, threads sticking out on every side, all you have to do is pull and it keeps unraveling, this idea of myself keeps unraveling.

I’ve gone back and forth as to whether to share this personal moment with you. It feels vulnerable to share this! And… in my heart of hearts I know it’s the vulnerable and very human moments that connects me to you.

Here I share about a recent moment where I was struggling with some anxiety around navigating a big transition in relationship.

What a journey! I just completed filming 15 videos to share with the world on how to create “safe enough space” to really be able offer people with trauma and really sensitive nervous systems healing and growth when working with them - whether 1:1 or in groups.

The reality is that there are many different kinds of coaches and many different kinds of therapists with innumerable amount of various training backgrounds, so it’s important to inquire about the specifics of each person and what they offer and what their training is.