Start in a safe zone with a flirty chat about sexting. Does she like it? What sort of banter fires her up most – soft-core, explicit? This kind of “prep talk” can ease the pressure on her during the romp itself.

Prime her for later with a hot midday conversation. Tell her what you want to do to her or how you want to make her feel. Use sexually charged verbs and adjectives, like “lick” and “wet”. If you’re SMSing, ask what she wants. When she responds, she’ll use the language she deems sexy – your starting point for later.

During foreplay, whisper phrases from messages that turned you on. As the heat rises, add dirtier words to compliments. Tell her exactly what you want her to do; your taking control may turn her on.

In the afterglow, reinforce how hot she was. Say, “I was so turned on when you said __ .” This will make her feel more comfortable talking dirty, increasing your shot at a repeat performance.