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Topic: From E-Hell Blog: Do People Listen To The Lyrics? (Read 94097 times)

After reading an National Public Radio survey of listeners about the most inappropriate wedding songs they’ve heard, I had to wonder if people bother to actually listen to the lyrics being sung in songs they process down the aisle to or dance that first dance.

The winning songs are:

1. Send In The Clowns by Judy Collins. Yes, people have actually walked down the aisle to meet their beloved and begin a new chapter in their lives to this sad dirge of a song. And what is worse, it’s a sad break-up song that almost makes me want to slash me wrists from the melancholy funk I’d been in listening to it.

Just when I stopped opening doorsFinally finding the one that I wanted - was yoursMaking my entrance again with my usual flairSo sure of my lines - then nobody’s there

Don’t you love a farce; my fault I fearI thought that you’d want what I want - sorry my dearBut where are the clowns - there ought to be clownsMaybe next year

2. You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling by the Righteous Brothers. Not exactly my first…or hundredth choice of music to accompany my first dance with my husband but some people obviously have different standards than I do. Now There’s No Welcome LookIn Your Eyes When I Reach For YouAnd Girl You’re Starting To Criticize Little Things I DoIt Makes Me Just Feel Like Crying Baby’cause Baby, Something Beautiful’s Dying

If I were a guest forced to witness this first dance, I’d have serious reservations as to the health and longevity of the marriage.3. The Lady is a Tramp by Frank Sinatra. Just because Sinatra sings it doesn’t make it an appropriate wedding song but some dinglehead chose to sing it to his new wife at the reception. It just doesn’t seem particularly smart to sing a song to one’s wife, with her relatives in attendance, with the word “tramp” in it 14 times.

Doesn’t like dice games, with sharpies and fraudsWon’t go to harlem, in Lincolns or FordsWon’t dish the dirt, with the rest of those broadsThat’s why the lady is a tramp

Oh, cute. The song also refers to women as “broads”. Lovely, simply lovely.

4. La donna e mobile by Verdi (Rigoletto) The translation from the Italian of this famous opera piece is:Woman is flightyLike a feather in the wind,She changes her voice — and her mind.Always sweet, pretty face,In tears or in laughter, — she is always lying.Always miserable is he who trusts her,He who confides in her — his unwary heart!

Yeppers, just the right words to sing during a wedding ceremony. And now you know why some churches and pastors forbid secular music to be played in church wedding ceremonies.

It's not "wrong," but you've gotta expect a few raised eyebrows. A lot of people consider the music selection to be a part of the content of the wedding ceremony. If you're walking down the aisle to a song about people who have broken up, people are going to notice (and probably be a little amused.)

I went to a wedding a few years ago where the bride and groom wrote their own vows. These vows were very non-committal for a wedding ceremony. They basically said that they were happy to be together at this stage in their lives, and if at some point down the road it would benefit them to split up, they will look back on this time kindly. Sure, it's their wedding and they can promise each other whatever they want...but I couldn't help but think "Wait, did they just promise to have a civil divorce in a few years?"

Basically, I think that if you do something outside what people are expecting, which you are within your rights to do. they're going to notice and probably discuss it. Just look at the dancing wedding party on YouTube.

Oh, and as for bad song choices. I have a friend who is getting married early next year. Her future MIL really wants Alan Jackson's "Remember When" for their parent/child dance. "Remember When" is a lovely song about a couple who is looking back on their many, many years together (including the first time they played scrabble.) It would be great for an anniversary...not so much for a parent/child dance!

Actually, I don't mind "The Lady Is a Tramp". I've always seen it as a song about a woman who doesn't care what other people say about her unconventional ways, because she has her own integrity.

And "broads" is pretty mild, considering the way women are referred to in songs today.

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My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

I'd agree with both of these. There are a few songs that might be absolutely crashingly inappropriate, but I'm all for more unusual choices - especially those which mean something special to the couple. Equally, though - as with any particularly unconventional or non-traditional aspect of the wedding - the HC going this route should realistically expect that there may be some comment about it, and to explain why they opted for it.

(Says the woman who wants Jonathan Coulton's 'Still Alive' at her wedding/civil partnership. [Hey, just because I am lacking in an SO at present doesn't mean I can't consider these things. Remind me to add 'Portal fan: desirable' to the hypothetical personals ad. ])

DH is an enormous fan of Queen. I love Bowie with an almost scary passion. That does not mean, however, that we wanted to dance to "Under Pressure" at our wedding. I also vetoed the playing of "White Wedding" despite my love of Billy Idol (I let the DJ - a friend of mine - get away with Rebel Yell though ).

The DJ also sometimes gets the music wrong. I know that at our wedding, he started playing entirely the wrong song for our first dance, realized it, and fixed it. For the father-daughter/mother-son dance, though, he played the wrong one (something random and probably inappropriate; I've blocked it out) but shrugged and let it go on. Not much you can do at that point but grin and bear it.

Some of them might raise eyebrows, sure, but it's not polite to go about gossiping about it.

I had a friend who used Remember When as her dance with her dad. I always thought it was SUPER inappropriate! Especially the part when they are talking about the first time they played scrabble!

Although, our first dance song probably raised a few eye brows as well, so who am I to talk! We chose Thank You by Johnny Reid, which is a man looking back on his life with his wife when she dies. But the lyrics are just so beautiful, and you wouldn't know what he meant if you didn't watch the video, so we didn't care! There was something about saying "Thank you for loving me" on our wedding day that really appealed to us!

4. La donna e mobile by Verdi (Rigoletto) The translation from the Italian of this famous opera piece is:Woman is flightyLike a feather in the wind,She changes her voice — and her mind.Always sweet, pretty face,In tears or in laughter, — she is always lying.Always miserable is he who trusts her,He who confides in her — his unwary heart!

Yeppers, just the right words to sing during a wedding ceremony. And now you know why some churches and pastors forbid secular music to be played in church wedding ceremonies.

Of course, double irony is that the character singing this is a confirmed seducer and betrayer, and one of those "flighty" women gives her life to save his. "Rigoletto" is, as a whole, not a happy source for wedding music.

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My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."