HOPE'S BLESSINGS AND TEARS

May God Bless You !
And remember, God is with you
even at the lowest times in your life.
It may seem that you are alone,
But He is there, showing the way!
Amen!!
Caad5@aol.comCaad5@aol.com

Give the Gift of Life, In Memory of Anne Marie a Special Angel that so briefly touched my life.

GRIEF

In 5 years time, I lost 6 very significant loved ones.
Five of them to disease's or sudden death. And one to a
cold blooded murder, during a robbery.
Also during this 5
year period, my husband was hit by a drunk driver,
and
suffers permanent disablities.
My daughter and I were just
minutes, behind him and
arrived before the ambulance.
My daughter and her future
husband were kidnapped by gun
point and robbed.
Thank God they escaped with their lives.
My other daughter, who was 6 months pregnant, was hit by
a drunk driver,
and spent time in the hospital. Thank God
the she is now OK,
and the baby was born healthy.
In 1994, my husband and I were
broadsided by a careless
driver, we were both injured,
and now I have permanent
injuries, on my left side.

I never had time to recover from one tragedy, till I was
facing another. Fear and panic were becoming my companions.
I was shown in this brief time, that life is not fair.
And I found out that Heroes do die, and that hearts really
do break. I was full of so many emotions, one of them being
hate, something I had never known. I hated the man who killed
my cousin, we were as close as sisters. I was also angry, and
Yes I was angry at God. I remember that right after I lost
my Daddy, (I was a Daddy's girl) the pain was swallowing me
My father died a horrible death to cancer. I told God, that
I would never pray again. I repeatly told God why I could
no longer pray, the truth is I never shut-up. I shared with
a minister my anger at God, and he warned me to becareful
because God might punish me. Thankfully I met another minister
who shared with me, that God understood my anger, and that it
was something that God would help me to get through. I was now
talking to God, more then I ever had, defending my anger.
But a part of me just had to talk to God, and make sense of
this. I think that it is important that you know, that my
father was the first death in this series of losses. The reason
being, that even though at the time my eyes could not see,
how God literally carried me through my losses.
"And it shall come to pass, that before they call, I will
answer; and while yet speaking, I will hear. Isaiah: 65:24
"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden and
I will give you rest." Matthew: 11: 28
He gave me the strength that I needed to be there for those
that needed me. And God sent a very Special Friend into my
life, to help me through the days and nights, I felt I
couldn't carry on. And there were many days and nights like
that. I will forever be grateful to my Friend Janet, for her
love and compassion, and those times that she listened, and
refused to let me give up. Thank You Janet !!!
"The Lord is gracious, and full of compassion.... and of
great mercy. Psalms: 145:8
I pray that by sharing my grief with you, that it may help
at least one person through their trying times.