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Adoption Ban Targets Gay Couples, Critics Say

A new Arkansas law that bars unmarried adults from adopting or fostering children puts the spotlight on same-sex parenting.

by

Bonnie Miller Rubin

Fayetteville, Ark. -
Anne Shelley and Robin Ross are unwinding after a jam-packed day of
ferrying 4-year-old daughter Eva Mae from preschool to ice skating
lessons to speech therapy.

"It's
pretty much your mundane American family," said Shelley, 46, over a
dinner of barbecue at their home near the Ozark Mountains.

But not everyone sees their domestic situation that way.

Arkansas
residents recently voted to ban anyone "co-habitating outside of a
valid marriage" from being foster parents or adopting children, as did
Shelley and Ross, 52.

Child welfare experts say that the
initiative was ostensibly written to prohibit any unmarried couples
from adopting or becoming foster parents, but that the measure's real
objective is to bar same-sex couples from raising children -- even if
it means that youths in need of homes have to wait longer.

"We
don't have enough quality homes as it is, and now we're going to place
more restrictions?" asked Susan Hoffpauir, president of the Arkansas
Chapter of the National Assn. of Social Workers. "A lot of us are still
shell-shocked by this."

Although the battle over California's
gay marriage ban which passed last month, has grabbed headlines, it is
same-sex parenting that is heating up as the next skirmish in the
nation's culture wars. Last week, a Florida judge struck down that
state's decades-old law preventing gays and lesbians from adopting.

Florida
had been the only state with a law specifically disallowing adoption by
gays, although they were allowed to be foster parents. In Utah, only
heterosexual, married couples can adopt. North Dakota law permits
adoption agencies to rule out prospective parents based on religious or
moral objection.

Conversely, in Illinois, prospective foster
and adoptive parents can be single or married, and the state Department
of Children and Family Services cannot use sexual orientation as a
basis for exclusion.

Still, many Americans are opposed to
placing children in gay households, and social conservatives hope the
issue will rally voters in the same way that same-sex marriage brought
them to the polls on Nov. 4.

In Arkansas, roughly 3,700
children are in state custody -- taken from their homes because of
abuse or neglect. Of those, 960 kids, whose average age is 8 1/2 , are
immediately available for adoption, said Julie Munsell of the state
Department of Human Services. And of the 1,100 foster homes, one-third
are headed by single adults.

But beyond the state system, the
ban set to take effect Jan. 1 will thwart private adoptions of children
like Eva Mae, left at the door of a Vietnamese orphanage with nothing
but a yellow blanket and disfigured upper lip. Moreover, the new law
could jeopardize a wide range of nontraditional living arrangements
such as co-habitating grandparents raising grandchildren, opponents
say.

Such scenarios are a "smoke screen," said John Thomas,
vice president of Family Council, a conservative group in Arkansas that
pushed to get the initiative on the ballot after it had failed several
times in the legislature. The real issue, he said, is that the state
has to set the bar higher when it comes to finding homes for children.

"I
understand that there is a lack of homes, but I refuse to believe that
the choice is between a horrible situation and a so-so situation,"
Thomas said. Family Council took its message directly to churches,
where it spoke out against "the gay agenda."

Finding potential
homes for foster children is a challenge in the U.S. -- especially for
youths who are older or have special needs. Some 129,000 children are
in foster care nationwide, said Adam Pertman, executive director of
Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute, and the only criteria should be
who can best provide a loving, permanent home.

The New
York-based, nonpartisan group concluded in a recent report that a
national ban on gay adoptions could add $87 million to $130 million to
foster care expenditures annually because more children would be living
in other types of institutional care, such as group homes.

"On its face, this [Arkansas] law is just crazy," Pertman said. "I fear what will happen if other states see this as a model."

Social
conservatives say the state could alleviate the shortage of foster and
adoptive parents by stepping up efforts to recruit better candidates.
"We have the opportunity to create the very best families," Thomas
said. "That's what we should be aiming for."

Still, a broad
coalition of child advocacy organizations, including the American
Academy of Pediatrics, decried the ban, as did Democratic Gov. Mike
Beebe and former President Clinton. Polls also predicted its defeat.

So
on election night, Shelley and Ross -- who have been together for nine
years -- were cautiously optimistic as they watched the returns. Then,
they were stunned: The measure passed in all but two counties.

"Do
I believe that most people in this state hate me and my child? No,"
said Ross, a psychiatrist. "Do I believe that the Christian right is
more organized here? Yes."

Eva Mae is on the floor of the
living room, intently working a puzzle and oblivious to all the adult
anxiety. The little girl pops up, asking for yogurt. Shelley gently
reminds her to use the magic word.

The two women traveled to
Vietnam in 2007, returning with a lethargic 2-year-old who, because of
a cleft lip and palate, could not swallow or talk.

Eva Mae
endured several surgeries -- and though her speech is still difficult
to understand, she has all but caught up to her peers in other
developmental areas.

"She is very smart," said Shelley, a former community organizer turned stay-at-home mom.

The
American Civil Liberties Union is considering a legal challenge to the
ban. But people are afraid to bring attention to their families, said
Rita Sklar, executive director of the ACLU in Arkansas. (Shelley and
Ross were willing to go public only because Eva Mae's adoption is
final.)

Thomas of Family Council said his group remained confident the ban would not be overturned.

"We took great care in writing this in such a way that it could withstand any kind of challenge," he said.

After
months of heated debate that didn't end with the election, Munsell of
the Department of Children and Family Services in Arkansas said the
upside of the battle is that citizens are acutely aware of the need for
adoption.

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Further

Tom-Joad-like, celebrity chef and Spanish immigrant José Andrés has opened a pop-up kitchen in D.C. to help feed thousands of federal workers being stiffed by the Man-Baby-In-Chief. Andrés' non-profit World Central Kitchen, which has fed millions of disaster victims in Puerto Rico and around the globe, served almost 10,000 meals in two days, with long lines of tearful, angry people grateful for a hot meal. Andrés' homespun, humane mantra: "What's good for you, must be good for all."

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