Date: Thu, 20 Dec 2012 19:10:42 -0500
From: Jon Steynbeck
Subject: My so called youth
This story is not a fantasy, it is the story of my introduction to sex.
It's as precise as I can remember it, but compressed in time over a few
months instead of a year. Enjoy.
Jon.steynbeck@gmail.com
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My So Called Youth
When I was 9 I had absolutely no idea about sex. Maybe I led a sheltered
life, but in those days sex was just not spoken about and gay sex was
barely thought about except by gay men. So, when I started to find myself
drawn to pictures of certain types of men, and I felt a funny feeling
inside, I didn't relate it to sex, just to a desire to look at them.
I was the only child of a divorced mother, and rarely saw my father. For a
couple of years she worked from home but had to travel one or two weeks
each month. Since she needed the job to support us she had to come up with
some kind of child care for me when she traveled. The perfect situation
was an older couple that lived down the street. I had already spent some
time with them since I really enjoyed being in their company. Doris and
Jonathan were a childless couple who seemed to like having me around. I
would mostly hang out with John as he worked in his woodshop in the garage.
He was retired from the railroad and Doris was still working as a nurse.
While I know they enjoyed looking after me, they also liked the money my
mother paid them for providing the regular child care. So, about one or
two weeks a month I would move into their house.
I definitely liked John. He was a big rough looking man but as gentle as
could be. He treated me well, and never talked down to me, which I liked a
lot. He would let me get involved in whatever project he was working on,
even though I think my assistance was probably more of a setback to the
project. I liked being near him and loved how physical he was with me. He
would tussle my hair all the time, pick me up playfully and rest his hand
on my shoulder or back with a casual ease. When he touched me like that it
felt warm and comfortable.
I was beginning to feel intimate with him, but I had no idea what that
meant, or the fact that my feelings for him were the very early hints of
sexual feelings. I would often pour through magazines looking for pictures
of older men I found appealing. When I found one of a man with his shirt
off and his hairy chest on display I would get an erection but I had
absolutely no idea there was a connection. I just knew I liked it.
One week during the summer when I was staying with them I was digging
through his tool box and found a big manila envelope , marked "projects."
I pulled out the contents and discovered they were magazines. They weren't
pornographic by today's standards since they were just pictures of naked
men in absurd poses, a few with semi-erect cocks, and some with full
erections. Their affect on me was profound and I think I got a little
dizzy as I thumbed through them. It never crossed my mind that it might be
strange John would have these magazines. All I knew was, they excited me.
I quickly put them back in the envelope except for one that had a lot of
pictures of big bear men. I slipped that one under my t-shirt and made a
bee line for my bedroom. When I got there I shoved it between the mattress
and the box spring so I could look at it when I went to bed.
I couldn't wait for bedtime and after John and Doris had gone to bed I
pulled it out and looked at it under the covers with a flashlight. I went
through each page and found three or four pictures that really excited me
and I gazed at them for a long time. This became my ritual for several
nights.
One morning after Doris had left for work and I was just killing time in
the living room, John approached me with the magazine in his hand. He had
found it when he was making my bed. I was beyond mortified. I was sure my
life was over. I didn't have the remotest idea how I was going to explain
why I was looking at that magazine of naked me.
John sat me down on the sofa and asked me if I had taken the magazine from
his toolbox. Obviously I had, but he needed some way to start the
conversation. I just nodded.
What happened next surprised me completely and left me loving him even more
than I already did. He explained that he completely understood my interest
in the pictures and that it was totally normal, and he was fine with me
looking at them. But, he told me, he didn't want Doris to find them since
she wouldn't understand. So, I should never have them out when she was
home. I think my jaw must have been on the floor as I stared at him. I
nodded that I understood and I didn't think to ask him why he liked looking
at them. I had dodged a bullet and I wasn't going to push the issue with
questions.
For the next few days I would sneak a magazine out of the toolbox when
Doris was at work and take it up to my room to look at. But, I still just
looked and enjoyed the feelings I felt inside as I gazed on the hairy men
with big cocks.
The next time I was staying with them I had spent some time playing in
their yard with their dog. Sitting on the grass in loose shorts was not
such a good idea because I ended up with multiple chigger bites on my
little ballsack, my inner thighs, and my little dick. The next day I was
tormented by an intense itch in my crotch. Doris put some calamine lotion
on the bites; calamine being the universal remedy for any itch in those
days. It gave me little relief, and I continued to viciously scratch my
dick, where the itching was the most intense.
I was in the shop with John and noticed my constant rubbing of my crotch.
He finally said, "you know, you are going to end up with open sores if you
keep that up."
I answered that I didn't care, it just itched so much.
He looked at me for a minute then told me he knew something that might
relieve the itch without irritating the bites. I was all for it.
So, he led me to the bedroom and told me to pull my shorts off and lay on
the bed on my back with my briefs on. He brought out a towel and folded it
a couple of time then placed it right over my penis. Then he began to very
gently rub the towel up and down across my dick. It really felt good and
did a lot to relieve the itch. The side effect was that I got very hard
from the rubbing.
He kept rubbing it as he told me the gentle rubbing of the towel would help
soothe the itch without irritating the skin on my penis. I was starting to
get a new feeling that was becoming far more pronounced than the relief
from the itching. I had no idea what the feeling was, but it was spreading
to my balls and down to my asshole. I laid there with my eyes closed and
told him in a kind of raspy voice that it really felt good and I wanted him
to go on a little longer. Suddenly this intense feeling gripped my cock
and balls and I had an intense urge to push up against the towel, which I
did. I let out a little grunt as I experienced my first orgasm.
I just laid there feeling warm all over and he took the towel away and told
me to get my shorts on and come down to the shop when I was ready. I lay
there for a while wondering what I had just experienced. I assumed it had
something to do with the chigger bites, but was quite confused. All I knew
was that it really felt good.
Obviously, within another hour I was scratching at my crotch again so I
asked John if he could do that "thing with a towel again." He agreed and
we went back to the bedroom and he gave me another orgasm. This time,
instead of pulling the towel off he asked me if I knew what had happened
when he rubbed the towel on me. I told him it made the itching feel a lot
better and he laughed.
"No, I mean that feeling at the end when you grunted and pushed up against
the towel,"
I told him I didn't know. He then explained it was an orgasm and that
eventually I would start to release sperm when I had one. He gave me the
birds and the bees explanation which I kind of understood in a broad sense.
I didn't really care much about the details. As he was leaving the room he
said, "just let me know if you need that again."
Well, it only took a couple of hours before I told him I thought I needed
the towel thing again so up we went to the bedroom and I quickly got on the
bed in my briefs. He brought the towel over and before he started folding
it he dropped it on the bed and said we didn't need it this time. With
that he put his hand on my briefs and directly on my rigid cocklet. Before
I could react he started rubbing and squeezing my cock with his fingers.
It felt so amazing I just laid back and let him do it. He was gripping my
cock with his fingers and jacking me off. It took me only a minute or two
to reach a climax and it felt even better than the previous ones.
That was the last one I had before I went home. The few weeks between
visits to John and Doris seemed to crawl. I went over and over what had
happened with John and got very excited each time I thought about it. I
also got into the routine of jacking myself off two or three times a day.
I loved how it felt, but remembered the orgasms he had given me as being
far more pleasurable.
When I went to their house again a few weeks later I couldn't wait for
Doris to go work so I could get him to rub me again. I didn't know if he
would now that my chigger bites were completely healed, but I sure hoped
so.
After she left we were in his shop and I maintained stiff erection of
anticipation, but he wasn't making any moves to do the towel thing again.
Finally, I couldn't wait any longer and I asked him if he could rub me
again. He didn't say anything about the lack of chigger bites but simply
put down his tools and said, "ok."
I ran to the bedroom, dropped my shorts, and climbed on the bed. He didn't
even bring a towel this time, he just sat on the bed next to me. He began
to rub my cock, but before I could get near an orgasm I felt his fingers
slide up under one of the leg openings on my briefs and his hand grip my
cock. It felt wonderful and I just laid there relishing the pleasure. He
rubbed intermittently to keep me from cumming to quickly. I think he was
prepping me for the next step which was when he grabbed the waist band of
my briefs and pulled them down below my little ball sack. Then he took my
cock in his fist and squeezed and stroked me slowly. I was in total sexual
bliss.
He asked me, "does this feel good?" and I nodded with my eyes closed. He
then started talking to me softly as he stroked me.
"I like having this done to me, too. It feels so much better when someone
else does it rather than doing it to myself. I like that this makes you
feel good, and we can do this as much as you want."
With that I reached an earth shattering orgasm. I was still much of an
innocent on details of sex, but I knew I loved his hand rubbing my cock.
It only took another hour before I was ready to do it again. I guess I was
a highly oversexed boy, but I didn't really care. I asked him if we could
do it again and he laughed but followed me up the stairs to the bedroom.
This time when I got on the bed he told me to just take my briefs off, that
it would be more comfortable. Before he touched me this time he asked me
if it was ok if he took his pants off too so he could do the same to
himself as he was doing to me. I only cared about his hand on my cock so I
was totally agreeable. He dropped his pants and I gasped when I saw his
erect cock sticking straight out. He was about 6 inches and fairly thick,
with a nice plump cockhead. His cock looked a lot like some of the ones I
had seen in the magazines.
He started to fondle me, not stroking me but gently rubbing my cock with
his fingertips and intermittently squeezing my nutsack. He had me hard as
a rock, but not close to an orgasm. I was enjoying the slower pace. At
one point I looked down and saw his cock sticking straight up between his
legs. I wanted desperately to touch it, but I didn't dare. He saw me
looking at his cock and smiled.
Finally, he took my hand and put it on his cock, saying "it's ok to touch
me if you want."
I squeezed it and did a pretty poor job of actually jacking him off but he
told me it felt really good. Feeling his cock in my hand brought me
quickly to the edge and I had a strong orgasm. This time he didn't get up
and leave. He just sat there stroking his cock, and I just stared at his
effort. He suddenly started breathing very heavily and his thighs were
quivering. A thick stream of cum spurted out his piss slit and slid down
his hand and cock. He kept it up for about 20 seconds then relaxed.
Looking over at me he answered the question I was dying to ask. "It's
sperm. You'll be doing it soon enough."
We did some variation on this theme for the next couple of days. I was
enjoying it very much, but typical for a boy with raging hormones I wanted
more. I had absolutely no idea what more meant, but whatever it was , I
wanted it.
The "more" came after a couple of days. After I had laid on the bed
waiting for his hand he reached down and took my cock in his mouth. I had
no idea this was something anyone would want to do but it felt so amazing I
didn't try to stop him. He used his tongue and gentle sucking to bring me
the best orgasm yet. I knew this was something I wanted him to do more.
I went home again to spend a couple of weeks recalling what we had done as
I vigorously stroked my cock. I kept seeing his cock in my mind, and also
the image of his mouth sucking on my cock. I decided that I wanted to feel
his cock in my mouth, but I had this ridiculous idea that if I did it he
would think I was sick. Such are the strange thoughts of a 9 year old.
When I went back for my week stay we went to the bedroom at the first
opportunity and proceded with our ritual. This time, when he started to
suck my cock I asked if I could do that to him. He pulled off my cock and
said, "I'd love that."
He got up on the bed on his back and I crawled down between his legs. I
was very nervous and just grabbed his cock at the base and stared at the
head. He watched quietly till I finally put the head in my mouth. It
didn't taste good and I wasn't to crazy about the musky smell around his
cock, but I didn't quit. I could only get about half of it in my mouth
before I would gag, so I just worked on the part I could manage. I
obviously was not doing such a great job because he started jacking himself
so he could reach orgasm. When he was close he told me he was going to cum
and I pulled my mouth off him. I wasn't ready to take his sperm in my
mouth, yet. I loved watching his cream spew out and run down his hand and
cock. It looked highly erotic.
He then brought me up so I my cock was over his mouth and as I supported
myself on the head board he sucked on my cock. His hands went to my ass
and he kneaded and squeezed my small mounds. It really added and extra
thrill to his blowjob.
Over the next months we started exploring more and more. He started
slipping a finger in me and rubbing my immature prostate as he brought me
to orgasm with his mouth. At first I wasn't crazy about it, but
eventually, as my hole got stretched out some, I began to crave his finger
in my boy ass.
It had not occurred to me that a man would want to put his cock in another
man's ass, In my innocent mind it made no sense. So, when he brought it up
as a possibility I was filled with doubt. He didn't pressure me, he just
told me it was something men who enjoyed what we were doing eventually did.
He said if my boy pussy was prepared well I would enjoy it. He had started
referring to my ass as a boy pussy, which I totally loved. He did make one
good point, if I liked his finger in my pussy, I would certainly love
having his cock up there.
Finally, I agreed, still filled with doubt. He began to work my boy pussy
harder, inserting a second finger over a couple of days, then eventually
working it up to three fingers till I could manage it with only some pain
at the first penetration.
One day he just told me he thought I was ready. I was both very scared and
very excited, if that is possible. We got on the bed naked and he worked
on my pussy for along time, finally getting three fingers in me and then
spreading them gradually to stretch me out. When he thought I was ready he
put me on my side and lifted one leg up. He got behind me and put his cock
up against my pussy. He slowly pushed but my hole seemed to want no part
of it and it wouldn't give enough to get his head inside. He rubbed his
head around my well lubed hole and kept trying. Eventually, he pushed
hard, I felt a lot of pain, but then the sensation of something big right
inside my ass. His head was inside me and once my ring wrapped itself
under his cockhead the pain receded. He kept it in place and very slowly
moved it inside me. He'd pause then pull it back a little, then push it in
a little deeper. Eventually he got it all inside me and it felt really
good. I think I felt more pleasure from the idea of his cock being inside
me, than I did from any feeling. After we rested for a minute he started
to fuck me in earnest. My cock was rigid and he reached around and started
stroking me.
After a few minutes of this he swung me on my back and lifted my legs. My
pussy was still gaping so he was able to slip it in with ease. I really
liked this position. We were able to kiss and I could feel his hairy chest
against me. I also like feeling my cock pressed against his stomach. I
reached down and grabbed what I could reach of his ass and I loved how his
butt muscles tensed up every time he would thrust. I felt like a girl
being fucked by her manly lover and it felt very good. I felt as if I had
given myself to this big bear of a man and I wanted him to own me. The act
of him filling me with cum was going to be a symbolic giving myself to him.
I didn't think of it that way at the time, but I know the feelings were
there.
After giving him my virginity we set out on a path of frequent coupling.
When we couldn't do anything because Doris was home we'd tell her we were
going to take a nap. We would go into his bedroom and lay facing each
other. He would softly tell me all the things he was going to do to me
when we got the chance and he would get me very hard. A few times I
orgasmed without touching myself, but usually we would just rub each
other's cock through over our pants till we both came. If Doris came
upstairs we could hear the loud creaking of the old steps and would simply
stop what we wer e doing and feign sleep.
I continued playing with him, although progressively less often, till I was
18 and went off to college. I can still bring myself to an intense orgasm
if I jack off while recalling what we did together and how gently he
introduced me to sex.