Monday, April 30, 2007

75 days to go

I never thought that I would feel this way, but I feel as though all the different paths that I have been on throughout my life have led me right here, to this marriage that will take place in 75 days. I don't really believe in destiny, but sometimes it's hard not to when I think about how everything has worked out so far. I have grown so much as a person in my relationship with Roy. I've never had as much faith in myself or another person as I do in our relationship. It amazes me, quite simply, to really feel love and commitment for someone. It feels like I have finally come home after a very long time.

In the process of planning our wedding, I have second-guessed every wedding-related decision, but I have never second-guessed the most important one: to marry Roy. Sure, I get scared and worry about the future. But I never wonder whether or not I'm making the right decision. I just know that I am.

I wish that my past self could have met my present self. She could've used some guidance in relationships and life. By no means do I know all there is to know, but I have grown up quite a bit in the past few years. Hell, even in the last year, I have changed and grown quite a bit. It's an emotional journey I'm on, and one that I'm very grateful for.