She Slept with Another Before we Dated

We often have visitors write in with solutions to each others' problems. Here is a visitor's solution to one of our visitor's questions.

Original Visitor's Question from a 51-60 year old MaleI am a newlywed Baptist preacher. One evening I asked my wife if she had ever slept with another preacher. She replied that she had. After a little nudging, she said it was the minister that married us. He was an associate of mine.

Whose place was it to tell me prior to the wedding so I could determine if I wanted him or to perform the ceremony or not. They were both married at the time, but my wife was seperated from her ex-husband. We are both in our late forties.

Also, do I have a right to feel betrayed? Hurt?

User Submitted Advice from a 13-20 year old Maletoo late to fix the past

Listen, I am going thru the same process about my girfriend. But, u have to remember that the past cannot control the future that awaits for you and your wife. She has forgotten about it and so shall you becuzz u chose to ask her and chose to face the hurtful past that u cannot get over. This is a test to show how much u love her because if you love her, u would try to fight it. Wut matters now is wut happens with you and her. She loves you, and i know she does. It is to late to fix the past because the past has already been set and gone.. Continue having fun, laughing, and wut ever it takes to get that dreatful thing off your mind........and u have to remember that she is all yours now , no matter who had her.......She chose to stay with you........you are the chosen one she picks out of all she had or been with.......Your life is one track on a cd.............this is your only chance to forgive her and love her. It's not like she had sex with him behind your back........now is it....... so don't be mad,,,,,,,,,,be glad that she's yours now.