Wednesday, September 03, 2008

I guess it's fitting that in the Fall, plants die. And while I expected the demise of Al, the Space Plant (may he rest in peace), I certainly didn't expect my cactus, Bob, the Succulent (isn't that fun to say?) to die as well. This is par for the course. People who know me also know that I cannot keep plants alive. Apparently I have a quota on the living things thing. One husband, two kids, two dogs, two cats, two guinea pigs and 24 Girl Scouts are all I'm allowed.

There was a time in my life, when to discourage my friends from giving me plants, I kept a hanging something by the sink in the kitchen. It died, because that's what plants do in my presence. Even though it had plenty of light and access to water (being next to the sink and all). I kept that dead plant for two years to remind myself not to take on any more. People thought I was a psychopath, but it worked.

Imagine my surprise to find Bob lying on his side, life eaking from his prickly body. I killed a cactus. I may be the only person on earth who can kill something that can survive in Hell-like conditions. I wonder what that says about me?

I guess the Summer of Plant Weirdness is finally over. All I have to look forward to next year is seeing what strange things come up in the Spring. Personally, I can't wait.

The one constant in my house is no plants. I can't keep them alive. Not sure why. I have been able to keep two plants alive in my office but they usually have to droop completely over before I remember to water them.

This is just a guess as I know NOTHING about plants, but maybe Bob needs a bigger pot? I really did think it was impossible to kill a cactus. And poor Al. When he went he really went.

I've killed my cactus, Leslie. I mean, I only need to water it once a month and clearly I did it wrong. I don't think cactuses really have a will to live... They probably want to come back as a Bird of Paradise or something....

I do have an African Violet though, who seems to like me, and so far I've managed to not kill it. Going on about 5 years now, I think.

I've killed a cactus before. I was rather surprised. I've got some kind of plant now that I water once a week. It's hanging over my tub. It seems to be thriving which is even more surprising than my killing a cactus. *g*

I have the same problem with plants. I have concluded that it is not my fault but the problem is that the plants cannot yell at me like the kittens do at night for the food. The kittens, my children and my husband realize that I need to be reminded of things since there is just so much that needs to be done.

Hee hee. I'm a plant killer too. Ithink I'm down to one - maybe two - living plants in the house. The only reason they survive is because the DH takes care of them.

I have a 36 yr old Christmas cactus sitting on my desk. It was a cutting from the cactus my grandmother gave my mother, when good ol' grams flew out west to spend the month with my mother before I was born. Needless to say, the Christmas cactus was a peace offering because they didn't get along so well during that month. The funny part about this story is that damn cactus generally only flowers in November (around my birthday), but every flippin' time I've been pregnant, it's flowered at unusual times (like in the spring or summer, when I've GOTTEN pregnant). The last time it happened (4 yrs ago) I thought there was something wrong with the plant, then wammo...a week later I found out I was pregnant. Needless to say...that plant is on it's last legs. I've stopped watering it. The DH thinks I'm being cruel, but there's NO way I'm letting that thing flower again. (Secretly, I think he's watering it. And yes, we have issues to discuss...)

Elizabeth, you might have something there with your pregnancy test cactus! Make some cuttings before it dies! Just don't glue googly eyes on it. It's just too weird. I should've known it was a bad idea when Christopher Walken suggested it...

Maybe you baby your plants to much, you give them to much TLC. This could be your problem. Maybe a little less water may help. I have a plaint in my living room that I can't remember to water ofter and it is doing very well.

mshellion reminded me of something I've noticed before - I have known any number of people who claim they kill plants, but can grow African violets just fine, while I can grow just about anything BUT an African violet! Give me an African violet (or any similar plant) and it'll be dead inside a few months. What's up with that?

The Crime

The authors of this blog are hereby charged with writing Killer Fiction novels responsible for spontaneous outbursts of laughter in public places, uncontrollable swooning over larger-than-life heroes, and the deaths of countless fictional villains.

The Evidence

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