Vigils Held World-Wide for Delhi Rape Victim

The gang rape and subsequent death of a young woman in New Delhi last month not only sent shockwaves through India, it reverberated around the world, with people far and wide calling for the Indian government to take action.

India Gate in Delhi was the epicenter of the initial demonstrations and vigils, but they spread to North America, Europe and elsewhere. Candlelight vigils have been held in cities such as Vancouver and Ottawa, London and Geneva, Seattle, San Francisco and Washington, D.C. More are planned.

The slogans at these gatherings have been similar to those seen in India’s capital: “Don’t tell your daughters not to go out at night, tell your sons to behave better.” “You sent her to Singapore for better health care, send them to Saudi Arabia for better justice,” and so on, they say.

The objective of most of these vigils is to get the Indian government to act. At a vigil held in San Francisco, for example, a petition was read and then presented to the consul-general of India in the city, urging the Indian government to stem the increase in violence against women in India.

Preeti Shekar, executive director of Narika, a California-based organization supporting women’s rights, says her organization has already held a vigil and is aiming to do more soon. Roughly 100 people have joined vigils in Washington and San Francisco, but more are expected to attend upcoming demonstrations planned in Houston and Manhattan.

Distance hasn’t diminished the ownership and frustration over this horrific act. “There has been considerable outrage in the South Asian diaspora,” Ms. Shekar says.

People are demanding justice and at a deeper level, a change in the attitudes toward women in general.

Ms. Shekar said she believes that Bollywood and popular culture have played a part in the increased objectification of women, but much of the problem stems from sexual repression. “Indian society is highly sexually repressed and that has also contributed to extreme sexual perversions. Boys and girls are not allowed to socialize normally in India - most social spaces are very oppressively heteronormative and this creates awkward and inappropriate social behavior,” she said.

“Many times, it degenerates into repressive sexual behavior that we very flippantly call ‘eve-teasing.’ What it really is, is sexual harassment. Girls and women in India face sexual harassment of varying degrees every time they negotiate public spaces.”

Purvi Shah, who has led a non-profit anti-violence organization in New York, says the brutal attack on Dec. 16 and its aftermath should bring to the fore discussions on how to educate people and change attitudes and priorities, in the process creating a safer world for everyone.

“The brutality the Delhi rape victim suffered -- and dire consequences -- must not be seen again, anywhere,” Ms. Shah said, noting that the subject also needs to be addressed in the U.S., where politicians have also shown insensitivity and misunderstanding by using terminology such as “legitimate rape.”

“This… gives all of us a chance to question how it is that our communities across the world condone and even enable such violence through our beliefs about gender roles, sex, and violence,” she said.

Lakshmy Parameswaran, a founder of Houston- based Daya Inc., which serves South Asian survivors of family violence and sexual assault, added that it is difficult for women from anywhere in the world to talk about violence they have suffered, particularly sexual abuse and rape.

“It is because women often assume responsibility for getting attacked and this feeling gets reinforced when the society, directly or indirectly, blames them for ‘getting themselves into’ these situations. Victim-blaming is the reason why most women don’t report incidents of sexual harassment, assault and rape,” she said.

“As for women as a group speaking out against the Delhi rape incident, I am glad Indian women are taking a bold stand against it. This incident sounds like a straw that broke the camel’s back, for incidents of sexual harassment and rape have been happening all along in India,” she added.

Ms. Parameswaran believes that both men and women in India need to be better educated on the issue: “Men need to know that using violence is a learned behavior and has nothing to do with the victim’s behavior. Since the behavior is learned, it can be unlearned. Women should realize that they do not deserve to be abused or assaulted regardless of their appearance and choices.”

Others want to take a more radical approach, as evidenced on social network site Twitter. One user, a Canadian American called Sarika Bhatt, tweeted: “You raped her bc her CLOTHES provoked you? I should break your face bc your STUPIDITY provokes me. #DelhiRape”

Even United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki-moon chimed in, expressing deep sorrow at the death of the 23-year-old student and calling on the Indian government to strengthen critical services for rape victims. He added that the U.N. was ready to support reform efforts.

Visi R. Tilak is freelance writer with bylines in publications such as the Boston Globe, Indian Express, India Today and Tehelka. She can be reached via email visitilak@gmail.com, her website www.visitilak.com or on Twitter @vtilak.