Cory heard a knock at his bedroom window and, in his drowsiness, could only think of how thankful he was that he had chosen to come earlier today. He rose from his bed and stumbled over to the window while rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

As the window was raised, Shawn Hunter climbed into the house, and lips connected.

Shawn was on the run again. He knew not where he would go or how long he would stay there, but he needed to get away. He had saved enough money over the past couple of months to bum a ride to the train station and buy a ticket, but he has been sitting on the bench for hours, unsure of which train to take. As the clock on the wall told him it was nearing 2 in the morning, he realized that he wasn't actually planning on leaving Philly at all. So he grabbed his basically empty bag, made sure his wallet was still secure in his pocket, and began the walk back to the Matthews'.

In about an hour, he arrived at the house and gazed upon it in envy. How he wished he had grown up in an ordinary, happy, loving family instead of in trailers and on the streets with flaky parents and adults who abandoned constantly. He brushed aside his thoughts and walked around to the back, careful to avoid any missteps in the darkness.

Quickly climbing, he made his way to his best friend's window and gently knocked on the glass. Cory was a light sleeper so Shawn only had to wait a few seconds before he heard Cory drag himself to the window. As soon as the glass began to rise, Shawn squeezed himself through the gap and covered the other boy's mouth before he made to much noise. When he removed his hand the boy spoke.

"Shawn, what are you doing here? It's 3 in the morning!"

Shawn sighed. "I ran away."

"Again?" Cory interrupted.

"Cory, just listen to me. I can't stay there anymore. It isn't home. Could I stay here, just for tonight?"

"Shawn we aren't 12 anymore! You can't just run away and climb though my window anymore! This isn't your home either, Shawn."

"But it is." Cory looked ready to speak again, but Shawn beat him to it."It's my home because - well because you're here, Cor. I know we aren't 12, we're 17. Just because the years change, our friendship does too? You're all I've got."

Cory stared for a moment before his eyes softened and he spoke again. "Alright Shawn, but just for one night, then you've got to back."

Shawn grinned and wrapped his arms around Cory's neck in a hug. Cory, unused to such affection from his friend, froze for a moment, but soon raised his own arms and wrapped them around him.

After a minute, Cory cleared his throat and held Shawn at arm's length. "So, where are you gonna sleep tonight, huh? I don't really keep sleeping bags on hand anymore, and now that there's only one bed -"

"Could I just sleep with you?" At Cory's widened eyes he quickly continued. "I mean, on opposite sides, of course. I really don't want to sleep on the floor again."

Shawn peered into his friend's eyes, hoping he would allow him this. When Cory sighed, he knew he had him.

"Fine. Come on."

Cory rummaged through some his drawers looking for something that might fit the other boy. They weren't twelve anymore, so there was no major height difference, but he still wanted him to be as comfortable as possible. He finally settled on a pair of plaid lounge pants that were a size too big for him but would fit Shawn fine. When he turned around to hand them to him, he was surprised to find Shawn on the edge of the bed, in his boxers, fast asleep. He sighed and got in on the other side and quickly fell back to sleep.

On the opposite side, Shawn cracked open an eye and smiled. He inched closer to the other and closed his eyes and looked forward to dreams he knew would be plagued with Cory.

Cory heard another knock at his window. He hadn't even been asleep this time, as it had become routine that Shawn would show up at his window between 2 and 3 in the early morning. At first it had just been once or twice a week, but it had recently become a daily occurrence. He opened the window and returned to his bed. He heard the window close and a few footsteps before he felt the bed sink next to him. He rolled over and stared into Shawn's eyes, the moonlight streaming in illuminating them beautifully. He scooted a bit closer, and so did Shawn. Eventually, they were so close that their noses brushed, and then, sensing the strangeness of his actions, Cory flipped onto his back to stare at the ceiling. Shawn sighed and did the same, but when he reached his hand out to clasp the boy's fingers, Cory did not object.

For five months, Shawn would come through Cory's window at night and sleep next to him. Cory stopped asking why, and Shawn stopped offering reasons. They would lie side by side with their hands intertwined between them, never getting closer than that.

But Shawn had other things on his mind.

"Hey Cor?"

"Yeah, Shawnie?"

"Do you... D'you remember that time when we were drinking... And you told me that you couldn't live without me?"

Cory inched closer to Shawn so that their sides were pressed together, hands lost between them. "Yeah?"

"Well, I think... That is to say that I feel like... The same way." He sighed. "I can't live without you either, Cor."

Cory turned towards him and Shawn followed, their noses brushing for the first time since that awkward night so many months ago. Cory released Shawn's hand and heard a disappointed sigh before he slowly wrapped his arms around him in a hug. He felt Shawn relax in his arms.

They stayed in that position for a while, and soon their breathing slowed to a steady rhythm, and they both fell asleep.

Shawn climbed to Cory's window again. He was earlier than usual because he wanted a chance to talk to him before they fell asleep. Once inside, he wrapped his arms around Cory's waist and nuzzled his face into the crook of his neck. Cory no longer hesitated when this would happen, and immediately brought his arms up around Shawn.

This time it was Shawn who pulled back first. He grabbed Cory's hand and led them to the bed where they lay down together. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment before Shawn finally began in a soft whisper.

"Listen, Cory. You're my best friend and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that."

"Nothing can split us up, you know that Shawnie."

"Well, I know, it's just... I realize that this is weird, what we're doing." Cory's arms tensed and he tried to release him but Shawn held tight.

"Just listen, Cor! I know this is weird, but I like it. I don't want this to stop. I just... I want..."

"What do you want?"

The speaking died away and all that was left was the sound of their soft breaths meeting between them. Then, suddenly, Shawn stretched forward the last inch and kissed him. It was just a peck, a touching of lips, but it was more than enough to get his point across. He pulled back to look into Cory's surprised eyes.

They were frozen - neither knowing what to do in that moment.

Realization hit Cory who rushed in and pressed their lips together again. He felt Shawn smile into the kiss and couldn't help smiling himself.

Eventually the touching of lips wasn't enough, so Shawn opened his mouth and ran his tongue across Cory's lower lip, asking permission. Cory conceded and parted his lips, allowing Shawn's tongue to enter and explore every corner of his mouth. Soon the smaller boy joined in and there was a short battle for dominance before Shawn reclaimed control of the kiss. He rolled on top of Cory who was too involved in the kiss to feel any sort of shock. With either hand on the side of Cory, his left still intertwined with Cory's right, he gently lowered himself down, their bodies melding together perfectly. He knew he wouldn't hurt the boy because, although he was a bit older and taller, Cory had somehow wound up muscled and solid as opposed to his somewhat lanky frame.

They lay there for what seemed like hours, tongues twisting around, before Shawn noticed the noticeable bulges in both of their pants. He shifted a bit and Cory broke off the kiss to gasp as their clothed erections rubbed together. Shawn leaned back into the kiss and kept grinding their hips together until Cory couldn't take it anymore. He flipped them over and made quick work of ripping off Shawn's pants and then slipped out of his own as well. He stuck his fingers into Shawn's mouth and he sucked on them for a while until Cory pulled them back out and replaced them with his tongue again. He reached down between them and slowly inserted a finger. He felt Shawn twitch at the initial discomfort but he was distracted by the kiss and Cory's other hand which had found its way to his cock. He added a second finger and Shawn yelped into this kiss. Too soon after, the third finger was introduced and Shawn pulled back from the kiss to let out a strangled cry before smashing their lips together and shoving his tongue in Cory's mouth. Cory worked his fingers inside of him, and soon the pain turned to pleasure as Cory found that spot inside him. Shawn gasped as his back arched off the bed.

"Do that again."

Cory obeyed and brushed his fingers against the spot a few more times, eliciting a similar response each time. Finally he slipped his fingers out. Shawn whimpered at the empty feeling but as Cory positioned his body to enter, he felt hands push him back.

"Wait."

Cory immediately began to panic, worrying he did something wrong before Shawn reached up and kissed him again. Shawn pushed him back so that he was sitting on his knees at the foot of the bed and crawled between his legs. He looked up at Cory and smirked before darting his tongue out to lick the tip of his cock. Cory shuddered as Shawn continued. He ran his tongue from the base of the shaft to the tip and then dove in full force, taking him in all at once. He kept himself from choking and then pulled back, head bobbing up and down, his hand fisting what he couldn't reach. Encouraged by Cory's soft moans, he continued on, adding a twist with his hand and a harsh suck. He kept bobbing until Cory grabbed his hair and pulled him off, bringing him up and roughly kissing him. Cory pushed Shawn back and climbed over him, never breaking the kiss, and positioned his cock at his entrance.

"Ready?"

"I love you, Cor."

Cory pressed their lips together, squeezed his eyes shut and plunged in, hearing Shawn's muffled scream and feeling his nails dig into his back. He froze then, fully sheathed, and waited for the okay to keep moving.

Shawn flipped them over and rose so that he was sitting firmly on Cory's cock.

"I love you, Cory."

All at once he began riding him and Cory's breath began coming out in short pants as Shawn let out small moans. Cory began thrusting up to meet Shawn's wild, rocking movements and brought a hand up to pump Shawn's cock to the same rhythm. Shawn froze and let out a low moan as he spilled over Cory's chest, and Cory gasped as Shawn clenched around him and he quickly released into him.

Shawn rolled off of him and lay on his side, watching as Cory reached over to grab some tissues to clean off his chest. When he was done he rolled over and caught Shawn's gaze. He leaned forward and kissed him.

"Goodnight Shawnie."

Shawn stared at him for a second, searching for something, before he deflated. "... Goodnight, Cory." He rolled over and felt Cory come closer and wrap his arms around him.

"Cory?"

"Yeah, Shawn?"

"... Nevermind."

For the next four months, Shawn would climb through Cory's window – which he had taken to leaving open – and stay with him. Sometimes they would kiss; sometimes they would get a little more intimate.

Every night, Shawn would tell him he loved him.

Every night, Cory would act as if he didn't hear it.

Every night, Shawn fell asleep with tears in his eyes.

Cory heard a knock at his bedroom window and, in his drowsiness, could only think of how thankful he was that he had chosen to come earlier today. He rose from his bed and stumbled over to the window while rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

As the window was raised, Shawn climbed into the house, and lips connected.

Shawn pushed them back until they fell onto the bed, and hurriedly stripped them both of their clothing. Kneeling down on the floor, Shawn pulled the other boy into a sitting position and Cory felt his cock be engulfed by warmth. Shawn made quick work of this task, bobbing his head frantically while working his hand at the base, until Cory pushed him off, knowing he wouldn't last long. Shawn got up to where he had fallen on the floor and pushed Cory back on the bed, climbing over him and inserting the slick member. He sat down on it roughly and began bouncing and rocking haphazardly as Cory struggled to keep up with him with his thrusts. Cory felt the muscles clench around his cock and they came together, both releasing pleasured cries. They lay side by side, each coming down from their respective highs, and Shawn turned to face his friend.

"Don't! Don't call me that. Either tell me that you love me or tell me that you don't, but you can't keep stringing me along like this!"

"Of course I love you, you're my best friend."

"Shut up, you idiot! Obviously we aren't just best friends anymore! We just finished – we just – you know what we just did! What we've been doing for the last four months! You can't act like this is normal!"

"Shawn, be quiet, my parents are in the next room. They'll wake up and catch us."

He took a moment to cool down before beginning again. "Listen, Cory. Either you tell me what the hell it is you want from me, or I climb out that window and you never see me again."

"You can't just leave! What about your family?"

"What family, Cory? The mother who left me years ago or the alcoholic father?"

"What about me?"

"What about you, Cory? You've got everything! You've got a future and a family. All I've got is you."

"Shawn, we've got a good thing going here-"

"No! We don't! This isn't good for either of us!" He sighed and looked Cory straight in the eyes. "I love you, Cory. Now, I want a straight answer. You can't ignore me anymore."

Cory turned his back to him. "I – I can't tell you what you want to hear, Shawn."

"Fine." Cory heard the rustling of clothes behind him and spun around.

"Wait! I just – you show up here, every night, and we do – whatever it is that we've been doing, but when I wake up in the morning, it's like it never happened. We go about our lives as if nothing's changed, and then you're here again the next night! You just don't get it. None of this – none of it at all – is real. But if I say that to you, and I mean it, it's not pretend anymore. It's real. And I don't think I can handle that."

Shawn turned around slowly, disbelief clearly etched in his features. "You can't handle that? You're letting me sit here, tortured, because you want to play pretend? News flash, Cory: this is real! Those were really my lips on yours, that was really your cock fucking me senseless. This is really me, your real best friend, telling you that I really love you, and you keep blowing me off!"

"You can't, Shawn! You can't love me!"

"I already do! There's no changing that!"

"Just stop! If you love me, and I love you, that makes this all real, and this cannot be real!"

Shawn opened his mouth to yell, but paused and then started softly. "Alright, Cory. This is really me, leaving." And he pulled on his shirt and headed over to the window.

"Can I at least get one last kiss?"

Shawn clenched his fists and turned to face him.

"Fuck you, Cory."

Shawn was on the run again. He knew not where he would go or how long he would stay there, but he needed to get away. He had no money this time, as he hadn't planned on needing to run anymore. He'd hitchhiked to New York, but had no idea where to go from there. He stood in the middle of a warehouse filled with the homeless and couldn't find a place to sleep. He'd been in New York for the better part of a year, and still had no permanence, no stability to his life. Every day he'd find a new place to sleep, and every day he'd think of the past. He'd think of when he and Cory were thirteen and got into trouble together. He'd think of the first night he and Cory held hands. He'd think of their kisses and all the times they'd made love. He'd think of everything except that last night together.

But a year in New York City didn't leave him without memories. He remembered how he had to pay greasy old men with sexual favors to get there. He remembered how he was mugged, jumped, and raped his first week in the city. He remembered all the people who ignored him and turned up their noses when he needed money to eat.

And then he'd remember Cory.

Cory finished high school without Shawn. He packed up his things and left for college without him. He sat in his dorm with a complete stranger who wasn't Shawn and wondered how he managed to screw everything up. He looked at the photo albums of the past year of his life and noticed that each picture seemed empty without Shawn.

He reported to classes on time each day. He did his research and half-assed his essays. He didn't talk to his roommate – he didn't even know his name. He lay on his bed at night and listened to the parties down the hall. There was never a night that he fell asleep without unlocking his window first.

When Shawn returned to Philly, he returned a different person. He was skinnier than before, and noticeably shabby. Three years in New York had emptied his eyes of most of the life they once had. He walked into his old trailer park and knocked on his door, only to find out that it wasn't his anymore. His father had died of alcohol poisoning 2 years earlier, and new trash came in to fill his place. Shawn lay down on the ground and let the first tears fall since he left so many years ago.

In the morning, he wandered around aimlessly for hours. He walked past all the places he would spend time with his friends, and even walked past John Adams High, just for kicks. Before he knew it, the sky had darkened and the air had grown cold. He realized he'd need to find someplace to sleep and contemplated going to the park he'd slept in a couple of times in his youth. Somehow, he wound up in the Matthews' backyard.

Cory was in his old bedroom, asleep in the bed, when he heard a knock at the window. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and walked over to the window, freezing.

"… Shawn?"

He opened his window and pulled the shivering boy – man – in. He led him over to the bed and laid him down, pulling the blankets over him. When he got the chance to actually look at him, he noticed the extremely worn look he had about him. His face was gaunt and covered in stubble, he had bruises everywhere, and his left eye was recovering from a nasty black and blue.

"Shawn… where have you been?"

"It doesn't matter. I'm home now."

"We aren't 17 anymore. You can't just come in here and expect me to let you stay here all the time."

"Yeah, I know," He coughed. "Why are you here? What about college? Didn't you go?"

"I did but nothing was the same without y– it just wasn't right. I dropped out last semester."

Shawn took a moment to take this in. "I really missed a lot when I was in New York, didn't I?"

He reached his hand out to brush his too-long hair out of his face. "Yeah. Apparently so did I. New York? What happened there?"

"I ran away. From you, mostly, and then when I got there – well, nothing was how I expected it to be."

"So it's my fault you're like this right now." Shawn opened his mouth to object but Cory stopped him. "No, it's true. This is all because of me. Because I was too stupid to see what was right in front of me. Because I was too stupid to realize what I'd had. Because I was stupid enough to let you leave." He leaned down and planted his lips firmly on Shawn's. "I love you, Shawnie."

"Well that's fantastic." He kissed him again, deepening it this time. "Because I still love you, Cor."

Cory climbed into the bed and cuddled up behind him, swiftly falling asleep.

ABC family has been replaying the entire series at 7 in the morning on weekdays. So of course I've not been waking up this early, I've just been dvr-ing every episode. Well, I've been having horrible writer's block since the beginning of the year, and I couldn't get anything out. The other day I saw the episode where Shawn sets a cherrybomb off in the mailbox and runs away to Cory's. From that came this!

Okay, so it feels a bit rushed to me, and it's definitely not my best, but I'd really like to know what you guys think about this one! I was really nervous about putting my first Cory/Shawn up when I know it's far from perfect.

Review, if you liked it. Review even if you didn't. Flames are always welcome. I'd really appreciate any feedback

The author would like to thank you for your continued support. Your review has been posted.