Being all alone in a big city is a very scary endeavour for me. I personally dislike it. Aside from expense ($10-20 a day in parking alone without counting in tickets and gas and everything) like food, extra rent and such, I just really miss my home. I love the woods. I also love Costa Rica. Both are home now. And I miss them very much.

I wish Libs was still around, it would make it easier. But she's found a boyfriend and moved in with him. I rarely get to see her. She's too wrapped up in him to notice the impact her change in attitude and attention have had on me. It was "us against the big city" before. Now it's just kind of different between us, and very contentious. I hope that stops soon.

At least he's cool and a good kid and off drugs and the same age as her. That's better than it could be. I'm not worried about her, I just miss her.

So I'm basically alone here, and wish I could be pretty much anywhere else now. I want to go home.

Libs wants me to move in to a spare room at his folk's house. So I can be nearby her, but probably also because I'd be available for rides and food then. Which I'm not right now. Not sure I want to do that. I like staying where I am right now, which is in the spare room at a family friend's house. It makes the alone part easier, even if I only see the people I know for a few hours a week.

The girls come home in April, and that will help.

How people wander away from home to places far and wide, without any friends or family around, I don't know. I generally love to go places, but not alone. And I don't do alone very well - as I've discussed before.

I wish I could go visit Kat. That would be fun. She lives in LA. Maybe I'll go there next? Or maybe I'll just go home to my little hole in the woods. I love it there.

I was going to bitch about missing you and here I am and there are TWO posts - Two! Which I have not read! And in one of them you mention me! Me!

Come if you want, (that's me pretending that I don't care if you come here or not, how'm I doing?) but I know you love being home in the woods, too. Why don't you come when the girls next go back to their dad?