Bird feeder fuss has Bethlehem Township in a tizzy

Squirrels can be clever when it comes to finding ways to reach squirrel-proof… (Morning call FIle Photo )

January 23, 2014|Paul Carpenter

The neighbor, who is one of the finest individuals you could ever hope to meet, nevertheless has been observed engaging in what some people might consider to be unlawful behavior.

Dick Tracy, a notable figure in Lehigh Valley education and sports circles for many years, feeds squirrels in his yard. He gives them nuts. I swear I have seen him do it with my own eyes.

Actually, I tried feeding the little rascals, too, but I'm not very good at it. They seem to sense that I'm not to be trusted.

"I've got 'em eating out of my hand," Tracy told me. Yeah, I thought, just wait until the SWAT teams show up. You can tell that to the judge.

After I did a little checking with Whitehall Township authorities, I determined that he's probably not in real big trouble, after all. I shall get back to that after I explain the reason for my concern.

According to a story in The Morning Call on Wednesday, a retired couple in Bethlehem Township were accused of "harboring rodents" in their yard on Second Street.

Hoffner was prominently mentioned in the story, which said Diane and Bill Ganssle, the retired couple, went before township commissioners earlier in the week to ask that a township ordinance be changed so they could feed birds in their yard without facing fines that could run up to $1,000 a day.

Hoffner, the story said, told them that their dozen bird feeders were in violation of a law that protects the township from "rodents." (When I hear the word "rodent" I think of rats and mice, which give me and my wife the heebie-jeebies, but I looked it up and it also refers to lovable critters like squirrels, chipmunks, hamsters, porcupines and even Punxsutawney Phil.)

Anyway, the story said Bill Ganssle took down all but one bird feeder, and even that remaining one was not in compliance as far as authorities were concerned, because it resulted in some illegal eating by squirrels, which are known to be very clever when it comes to raiding bird feeders.

Township Commissioner Mike Hudak, the story said, planned to take a look at the ordinance. "This is silly," resident Bill Berry was reported as saying, and Commissioner Martin Zawarski agreed, saying, "You're right. It is silly."

When I talked to Hoffner, he did not seem silly. He seemed quite reasonable.

"We are a complaint-driven township. We don't have the staff to go looking for trouble," he said. On Second Street, he said, there were complaints from multiple residents about not only deer and squirrels being attracted to spillage from the bird feeders, but also rats and rabbits.

At first, authorities were not sure what to do, but then the people who were complaining found an obscure 1972 "Vector Control" ordinance.

I also looked up "vector," which means "an insect or other organism that transmits a pathogenic fungus, virus, bacterium, etc.," which does not sound like squirrels to me, but section 247-3 says this: "No person in control shall feed wild birds other than in a suitable, properly shielded container for the food, installed in such a manner as to be inaccessible to rodents and to prevent the scattering of food on the ground."

Even so, Hoffner said, "there was no citation issued [to the Ganssles]. They were given a notice they could be fined," and he is satisfied they are in compliance with their one remaining bird feeder.

"The case is closed," he said.

Still, I had concerns about whether we had a felonious squirrel feeder across the street, so I put in a call to Whitehall code enforcement officer Melissa Wehr. Instead of Wehr, I got a call back from Mayor Ed Hozza.

"No, Whitehall Township does not have ordinances on bird feeders," he said, and I assumed that also applied to squirrel feeders. "If we received such a complaint, we would have to act on the complaint."

I, for one, am not going to complain because I suppose I also could be prosecuted over those occasions when I tossed nuts at squirrels, trying to buy their love.

Hozza gave one example of a complaint that did require action a few years ago.

"A woman fed skunks," the mayor said. "She had 'em trained. … It was like the Pepe Le Pew show."

(Pepe Le Pew is a stereotypical French skunk who is constantly romantic and on the make in the Looney Tunes cartoon series. I have to be careful what I say about French skunks, because when I recently wrote about certain elements of French culture — which have led the world in developing perfumes to deal with an aversion to soap and water — some French-Americans were furious.)

Otherwise, I asked Hozza, what action would the township take if there are complaints about bird feeders?

That sort of action, he said, would come "only if the complainant is complaining that they are attracting mice or rats."

What, I asked, would the offenders be charged with?

"Aiding and abetting?" Hozza replied with a laugh.

"And any residuals on Pepe Le Pew are mine," he said with an even bigger laugh, apparently in reference to the potential for the widespread publicity already resulting from the Bethlehem Township flap.

So, for the benefit of our readers in North Carolina, I'd like to emphasize that skunks do not seem to be a major problem in the neighborhood occupied by Tracy and me, although I have encountered a mouse or two from time to time.

I'll decline to comment on how I deal with mice, because I'm already in trouble with the French and I don't want the animal rights people coming after me.