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Hawaii Term Life Insurance Rates

Hawaii is an island state, the newest of the 50 American states and is made up entirely of islands. Interestingly, these islands are the tops of the world’s largest mountain range, protruding from the sea. Hawaii used to have its own indigenous people but now it is only populated by long haired surfers calling each other “dude” and speaking nonsense like “radical waves” and “awesome jump”.

Hawaii is also the home of surfer-turned-singer Jack Johnson and this is the reason no one visits anymore. Ever since Jack started singing, tourism has steadily declined on the island. Last year, the Hawaiian tourist board decided to put an end to this decline and put a price on his head - $5. Jack got scared and immediately took out Term Life Insurance for a 5 year period.

Jack knew he didn’t have long to live and 5 years, if he could last that long, would be just enough time to finish writing and recording his magnum opus; Surfers Rule.

With Hawaiian term life ins being amongst the best in the country, he got a good deal. In the event of his death, his family would receive enough money to be able to legally divorce themselves from him, ensuring no hits would be made on their heads by association.

Safe in the knowledge that his family could rid themselves of the cancer his music infects them once he’d kicked it, Jack set about making his record. Sure enough, it was complete tosh. In fact, early demos were released just a year into making it and all who heard them became physically sick. It was at this point that trained assassin Paul Simon finally took him out.

Jack’s Term Life Insurance plan was used to good effect, no one in his family was hurt. His surf boards were burnt in a tribal ritual and everyone on the island danced naked round the fire like wild Indians. Paul Simon was made a state hero and now everyone on the island, including boatloads of new tourists, walk around enjoying the sun and listening to ‘Mrs Robinson’ and ‘Sound of Silence’.