Here’s the dumb Emmy nominations

It’s the only people on Earth who think Two And A Half Men is funny! Actually, I might have to change that description, because the worst show on TV only got one nomination, for Jon “Unfunny” Cryer. The new “this doesn’t belong” Chuck Lorre show is Big Bang Theory, which looks really out of place next to shows like Curb Your Enthusiasm and Girls. The big winners, nomination-wise, are Mad Men and American Horror Story, with a staggering 17 each.

I liked American Horror Story but I wouldn’t go so far as to call it “good.” More like “incredibly addictive and trashy.” But maybe that’s just what we like these days. Here’s the complete list of nominees, along with my picks of what will win and what should win.

Jim Parsons as Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory
Larry David as Himself in Curb Your Enthusiasm
Don Cheadle as Marty Kaan in House of Lies
Louis C.K. as Louie in Louie – Should win
Alec Baldwin as Jack Donaghy in 30 Rock – Will win
Jon Cryer as Alan Harper in Two and a Half Men

COMEDY ACTRESS

Lena Dunham as Hannah Horvath in Girls – Should win
Melissa McCarthy as Molly Flynn in Mike & Molly
Zooey Deschanel as Jess Day in New Girl – Will win
Edie Falco as Jackie Peyton in Nurse Jackie
Amy Poehler as Leslie Knope in Parks and Recreation
Tina Fey as Liz Lemon in 30 Rock
Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Selina Meyer in Veep

SUPPORTING COMEDY ACTOR

Ed O’Neill as Jay Pritchett in Modern Family
Jesse Tyler Ferguson as Mitchell Pritchett in Modern Family
Ty Burrell as Phil Dunphy in Modern Family
Eric Stonestreet as Cameron Tucker in Modern Family
Max Greenfield as Schmidt in New Girl – Should win. Have no idea who will. Someone from Modern Family, probably.
Bill Hader as various characters in Saturday Night Live

SUPPORTING COMEDY ACTRESS

Mayim Bialik as Amy Farrah Fowler in The Big Bang Theory
Kathryn Joosten as Karen McCluskey in Desperate Housewives
Julie Bowen as Claire Dunphy in Modern Family
Sofia Vergara as Gloria Delgado-Pritchett in Modern Family
Merritt Wever as Zoey Barkow in Nurse Jackie
Kristen Wiig as various characters in Saturday Night Live – Will win, should win.

Glenn Close as Patty Hewes in Damages
Michelle Dockery as Lady Mary Crawley in Downton Abbey
Julianna Margulies as Alicia Florrick in The Good Wife
Kathy Bates as Harriet Korn in Harry’s Law
Claire Danes as Carrie Mathison in Homeland
Elisabeth Moss as Peggy Olson in Mad Men – Will win, should win

Anna Gunn as Skyler White in Breaking Bad
Maggie Smith as Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham in Downton Abbey – Will win, should win, no arguments.
Joanne Froggatt as Anna in Downton Abbey
Archie Panjabi as Kalinda Sharma in The Good Wife
Christine Baranski as Diane Lockhart in The Good Wife
Christina Hendricks as Joan Holloway Harris in Mad Men

SUPPORTING DRAMA ACTOR

Aaron Paul as Jesse Pinkman in Breaking Bad
Giancarlo Esposito as Gustavo ‘Gus’ Fring in Breaking Bad – Will win, should win, but this is the most packed category as everyone is great.
Brendan Coyle as John Bates in Downton Abbey
Jim Carter as Mr. Carson in Downton Abbey
Peter Dinklage as Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones
Jared Harris as Lane Pryce in Mad Men

American Horror Story – Will win Game Change Hatfields & McCoys Hemingway & Gellhorn Luther – Should win. Seriously, if you haven’t watched this, it’s on Netflix Instant, get on it. Sherlock

MINISERIES OR MOVIE ACTRESS

Connie Britton as Vivien Harmon, American Horror Story
Julianne Moore as Sarah Palin, Game Change – Will win
Nicole Kidman as Martha Gellhorn, Hemingway & Gellhorn
Ashley Judd as Rebecca Winstone, Missing – Should… haha, no, I can’t even bring myself to make this joke. This wasn’t even a “miniseries,” it just got cancelled.
Emma Thompson as She, The Song of Lunch