I'm a pretty techie guy. At least I think I am. 14 years of college, 1 Bachelor's degree in Mechanical Engineering, a Master's degree in Theoretical Physics, and 2 Ph.D's - One in Theoretical Physics, one in Mechanical Engineering from MIT. I'm a civilian but work exclusively for the government in fighter jet avionic turbine advancement and molecular based weaponry; specifically atomic energy and sensitivity fission on nano-particles and Quantum Hall Effects. So, take my word that I'm an introverted nerd. But enough about me and my inability to date women because I bore them when I talk about work.

I posted a screen shot which captured... I'll just repost... Anyway, through three hours of diagnostic testing, I was unable to detect any parasitic battery draw, continuously running apps, or any other physical or software related anomalies.

So, I went to the Verizon store. I presented empirical evidence leading up to my belief that the data captured on the screen shot is related to energy degradation; a poorly functioning battery (use small words when speaking to Verizon staff) and an OS with ADHD. I've managed to settle the OS down so the proportion of energy feeding the OS has decreased roughly 10%. Nothing earth shattering, but a reduction nonetheless. But more importantly, a brand new battery!

So, tonight when I go to bed in my Star Wars pajamas (is he kidding?) I'll charge my S4 to 100% capacity and, given I'll be off from work, will try to use my phone at a casual, average usage level. I will then take the gathered data, input it into a screen shot, and put it on display for your viewing pleasure.

I'm hoping that 14 years of collegiate torture in the form of numbers, formulas, and 30 page dissertations on quantum mechanics, supersymmetry, and Quasiparticle Tunneling qualifies me to assess a poorly functioning cell phone. If I'm right, then we can presumably conclude that the lithium ion battery included with the Galaxy S4 might have a factory defect creating a decreased effective life span. If I'm wrong, I'll be shamed with embarrassment and burn all four of my degrees (no, but I will feel genuinely stupid).

Stay tuned, and expect an accurate and detailed report from me tomorrow evening. Star Trek is on anyway, so, you know, priorities...