Archives Monday, March 12, 2012

“Are people disappointed that I’m not on fire?” Jennifer Lawrence joked to MTV’s Josh Horowitz on the red carpet of the world premiere of The Hunger Games in Los Angeles on Monday night. Nope. Not at all! We were dazzled by the young actress’ choice of super-shiny gold Prabal Gurung gown with sexy side and back cutouts. It hugged her curves and made her pose with confidence — almost as if she were already exiting the arena, triumphant. We also love how her smokey eye makeup and neutral lip color make her look like an ’80s glamazon. But all that stature, the screaming fans, and the endless praise from her co-stars and director didn’t stop the girl who was on fire from being the girl who jokes about herself and says things like “it’s so nice of them!” of the fans. “I never fully absorb anything,” she joked of all the hubbub over the movie. Sometimes, she couldn’t be less like Katniss Everdeen if she tried … and we mean that in the nicest way. Come back soon for plenty more photos and interviews from the red carpet!

Jason Segel knows how win us over: with a stream of constant, squirm-inducing self-deprecation! Oh, and a wardrobe malfunction here or there wouldn’t hurt either. While stopping by Ellen today, the Five Year Engagementstar explained how his couture suit inexplicably disintegrated at the Oscars. “My tuxedo self-destructed,” he claims. “It was perfectly fitted and then slowly, I’m sitting there and just buttons start falling off my tux until my shirt is held together by my bowtie and that it’s tucked in. That’s it.” As if that wasn’t as adorably humiliating enough, the seat of Jason’s pants blew out. “So then I stood up and applauded for somebody like Morgan Freeman or somebody great, with gravitas,” Segel admits. “And then I sat back down and, I’m not joking, my pants ripped from my butt to like the bottom of my leg.” You mean we could have had him on our Most Embarrassing Oscar Moments list? What a (good-looking, hilarious) waste!

Jason’s tux-plosion is only the latest in a string of hilariously embarrassing stories he’s happily shared with the world. Remember the tragic Taco Bell-littered “Before” picture of himself he revealed on Letterman? Or his claim that his date with Chelsea Gill, his YouTube fan “was more awkward for them than it was for me”? Or the seven-year-old who said the worst part of the Muppets movie was Jason Segel’s face? Swoon! Fortunately for him, Jason took his writing parter as his Oscars date, rather than a love interest who would have witnessed the whole embarrassing thing. “It would have been perfect,” Segel laughed. Yes, it would have been, Jason. Yes, it would have.

When I found out that Mr. A to Z himself Jason Mraz would be sitting down with me to discuss his latest album over margaritas, a few thoughts popped into my head. Namely: Am I going to have to wear a hat?

Yes, Jason Mraz is known for many things. Poppy songs, brilliant lyrics, and hats. In fact, one of the first questions on my torah-scroll of “things to ask” was to be if he ever had to take his hat off to be recognized. (You can find the answer out below.) So it was of the highest importance that we talk about them. For example, is his new long hair just a wig attached to a ski cap? (Fear not, ladies, his hair is allll reallll.)

We cover all this and more — avocados, bible camp, and his online screen name — in this installment of Happy Hour brought to you by Chili’s. Get your margaritas chilled, salt those rims, and check out the interview below!

So, last week, Jon Hamm lamented to Elle U.K. that “being a f—ing idiot is a valuable commodity in this culture because you’re rewarded significantly.” And the Mad Men star specifically called out Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian as examples of “stupidity” being celebrated. Today, Kim struck back, tweeting:

“I just heard about the comment Jon Hamm made about me in an interview. I respect Jon and I am a firm believer that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and that not everyone takes the same path in life. We’re all working hard and we all have to respect one another. Calling someone who runs their own businesses, is a part of a successful TV show, produces, writes, designs, and creates, ‘stupid,’ is in my opinion careless.”

Ooooh, burn, Don Draper. She respects you but thinks you’re careless. Oh, come on, Kim! You are making our jobs difficult here! Can’t you call him better names? Mock his basic cable pay? Wonder how he qualifies as smarter than you, since his job is to pretend sleep with a lot of women and basically be objectified by ladies on a weekly basis? Seriously, guys. You’re leaving all the good beefs to the Mob Wives and rappers. We bet Peggy Olsen and Roger Sterling would have awesome comebacks up their sleeves.

So many obviously-not-good movies get made in a given year, there’s really no point in singling out individual ones or acting particularly surprised when a movie that looks bad fails with the critics.

That is, unless a film manages to pull the bad-movie equivalent of Shooting The Moon and achieves a dubious 0% Rating on Rotten Tomatoes, an achievement of futility that’s so rare and requires so much across-the-board luck (and badness), it’s actually kind of impressive:

I know we’re all kind of sick and tired of these Lorax pics, but think about it. Danny Devito on one side, The Lorax on the other… candy coated body fluid being exchanged. Safe to say I would have no idea what was happening because I am over 6 feet tall and they are only slightly bigger than the blades of grass in Honey, I Shrunk The Kids, but still. Those hobbit feet, that highly-flammable mustache.. I don’t think any woman could resist.

Kiss your childhoods goodbye, anyone who was born after 1950 and before 1990! There as apparently both a new Flintstones TV show and a new Garbage Pail Kids movie currently in the works. You know, like you’ve been begging for! “It’s still in the early stages — I’m finishing a rewrite on the pilot,” Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane said of his take on the modern Stone Age family at SXSW this weekend. “We’re trying to, essentially, stay true to what that show is. There’s something cool to me about, in 2013, turning on your TV and seeing The Flintstones and having it look like The Flintstones…We kinda want to keep it, more or less, the same. The stories that we tell will be a little more current.” What a thorough explanation, Seth! We guess we only have one question about your decision to redo a classic then: WHYYYYYYYYYY?

Meanwhile, Deadline reports that a Garbage Pail Kids feature film, based on the deeply disturbing Topps trading card set, is now in development. Do children even know who the Garbage Pail Kids are anymore? Does anyone remember how terrifying they are? Plus, there already was a Garbage Pail Kids movie, released in 1987! It was a live-action musical! And the Kids are aliens! Who end up sewing clothes for a fashion show! We have to go get our crazy pill prescription refilled, because we’ve taken all of them. What do you think of the proposed reboots?

Remember The Wampug, the video of the tiny pug dressed up in a menacing Star Wars wampa costume? Here’s a sequel to that video that you secretly hoped would come into existence: The entire Planet Hoth scene from The Empire Strikes Back re-enacted with action figures and the pug in the wampa suit.

How did everyone channel their Star Wars superfandom before the internet? Did people just record these things onto VHSes and whip them at each others’ heads on the street? Reaganomics, man…

In retrospect, it was a really bold decision by George Lucas to kill off Luke at the beginning of the second movie. I haven’t seen Empire for a good couple of weeks, but I totally forgot that part. I do remember it being a dog in a suit though.

Despite the fact that he was allegedly seen eating food within a four foot radius of another human being this weekend, Ryan Gosling has not dumped his lady love of six months Eva Mendes. So knock it off with the loud, heart-wrenching sobs already! While the U.K.’s Daily Mailmade the argument that Ryan Gosling’s dinner date this weekend with a German model in Cape Town, South Africa implies he is giving Eva the boot, further evidence suggests that Gosling never even left Thailand, where he has been filming the upcoming crime drama Only God Forgives. The whole thing sounded pretty fishy to us; the only place Ryan Gosling can teleport is in our fan fiction! Besides, we assume Ryan dines exclusively with models. It’s not a vanity thing; the man just wouldn’t want to embarrass any of us “normals” by making people compare us to him. It’s really considerate when you think about it.

Fortunately Eva’s rep has since denied to the Daily Mail that the two have split and, according to Us Weekly, a source close to the The Place Beyond The Pines costars also confirms the two are going strong. So does that make you feel better? Hey, hey, hey…who’s our big boy or girl? Here are some Kleenexes. It’s going to be okay.

Here’s the latest SNLStefon Weekend Update appearance, where the ever-connected City Correspondent offers his tips on this Spring’s hottest events, from March Madness to St. Patrick’s Day to football jellyfish.

I wish I had more input on SNL’s usage of Stefon besides ‘here’s another video!’ but I really don’t; it’s literally the same formula every time and it’s always laugh out loud funny. I guess you can’t have too much of a good thing – Blowjay Simpson was right: