SURVIVOR TESTIMONY

Some of these stories are graphic, uncensored accounts of actual rapes and surrounding
circumstances. The language used may be raw and include street slang. JDI has made
only minor edits for spelling and clarity. The views expressed are those of the
individual survivor/author, and are not necessarily the views of Just Detention
International.

I have been raped and assaulted numerous times in numerous prisons. I have spent the biggest part of my life in state and federal prisons. I have been sexually assaulted by inmates and guards and even by a Galveston police officer.

My most recent rape was in March of 2010.

I am an insulin-dependent diabetic. On the day in question in the early afternoon I began feeling bad because my blood sugar started going down. I went to the medical department for a blood-sugar test and my blood sugar was at the extremely low number of 38. I was given sweets to eat and ice packs around my neck. After several hours I felt well enough to return to my cell. I went to bed immediately. It was approximately 6pm. My cellie was at work and my cell door was open. I don’t usually sleep while my door is open to prevent someone from attacking me or stealing something out of my cell. Seeing that I didn’t feel very good I took off my clothes and went to sleep.

I had one hell of a rude, scary, painful, sudden awakening. Someone threw a blanket over my head while one person was holding each leg and the one in between my legs raped me. It didn’t last very long but it was very scary and painful. I was scared of what they would do if I didn’t go along with what they were doing.

Once the one doing the rape was done all three of them ran out of the cell before I could see them. I was an easy mark because of my small size and being kind of timid and staying to myself most of the time. Also you’re kind of “out of it” and confused when your blood-sugar gets too high or too low, and they saw that in me.

I reported the assault immediately and was seen by Internal Affairs. They questioned and questioned and drilled and drilled me like they didn’t believe me. The only evidence I had was the bruises on my legs where the perpetrators held my legs during the assault. Finally after several hours they took pictures of the bruises on my legs and the medical department noted the bruises.

I was finally told nothing could be done because I couldn’t identify the guys that assaulted me. I was given the choice – would I rather be locked-up for my own protection or remain in the general population. I remained in the population and tried to find the perpetrators so I could kill them, but nobody would talk. I had a very good idea who a couple of the guys were but I didn’t want to hurt anyone if I was not totally sure they were the perpetrators.

A couple months later I started to experience symptoms of Paranoid Schizophrenia and asked for a transfer. I became extremely leery and distrustful of everyone around me, especially the ones who tried to befriend me. I became extremely unsocial and withdrawn. I felt people were continuously talking about me and scheming on me. I was placed at a psych Unit and I am currently taking psychotropic medications.

I hope my story will at least help one person who has gone through a similar situation to realize they are not alone and there is somewhere to turn. I was corresponding with a Catholic priest at the time and he assured me that I was not the cause of the assault and I was not alone. He recommended several organizations I could contact and through his encouragement I contacted JDI.