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Dear Snow and Mud Members,

If you were having issues logging in, please read this post to resolve them:

Re: Humorous Kijiji Adds

This one is from Craigs list also,long but very original!!

there u go..................................... Due to a change in circumstances, my income has reduced to the point where I can either afford to keep my wife, or I can afford to keep this Jeep - but not both. Since this problem doesn't have a perfect solution, I decided to apply some simple heuristics to figure out what to do. Here were the basic categories:

COST

Wife: Food and utilities monthly. Wife requires eating out 1-2 x per week. Every few months, there are expenses related to clothing and/or makeup, as well as other girl type things. Yearly vacations (though clearly this benefits me as well).

2008 Jeep Wrangler X: Gets 15 MPG city/19 MPG highway. I don't actually know this for a fact, but lifted it off the first website when I Googled "2008 jeep wrangler x mpg," so I assume it's accurate. After all, it is 10 seconds of research - it can't be wrong. What I do know for a fact is that when the gas tank is all the way on the "E" that it takes 16.6 gallons to fill it up. I usually do this weekly. Additionally, there are oil changes that I have to pay for every three months.

Winner: 2008 Jeep Wrangler X, but Wife has a better ROI.

FUN

Wife: Puts up with my nonsense, laughs at my jokes, goes with me to boy type things like sporting events, provides constant companionship and comfort. Wife willingly provides DD services when I want to drink with friends, and many a disastrous day has been transformed into great fun merely by her presence.

2008 Jeep Wrangler X: I am inside the Jeep every day, any time I want to be - every week of the month. The Jeep lets me take her top off any time and ride her in rivers, mud, even right out on the street.

Winner: Wife. The Jeep sucks at spooning.

DURABILITY/MAINTENANCE

Wife: Requires yearly maintenance checkups. I suspect a touch of arthritis as well (sorry honey, I know you don't agree. But having arthritic symptoms doesn't make you old. You still look mid-20's, while I look like I could be your dad. So really - no complaining. Do you know how many girls would kill to look as young as you?) but otherwise no issues. Wife requires food, water, daily attention, and a continuous fresh supply of books and movies.

2008 Jeep Wrangler X: There are three things that irk me about the Jeep. First, the sensor that says the tires are low on air pressure is always on. Always. Even when you fill the tires up with air. So, I actually have to occasionally check and make sure - by hand - that the tires are inflated properly. Ugh! Second (and speaking of tires), once, the right front tire - entirely of it's own accord, and having absolutely nothing to do with me cutting a corner too closely, I can assure you - attacked a curb, and lost. This resulted in a slow leak that made me replace the tire, so now there is a brand new tire hanging off the back (pictured). Third, the rail - or whatever the mechanism is called that puts the top back into place - is a bit misaligned, meaning I have to actually push a little when putting the top back on. You'll see when you come look at it. Otherwise, there are no issues. Put oil and gas in it and it works. It's a Jeep, after all - it's about as complicated as Snooki. Unlike Snooki, though, the Jeep doesn't want smush smush.

Winner: Wife, since she takes care of many of her own maintenance tasks. I can't say that about the Jeep. The Jeep is a bit lazy in that regard.

Wife wins the best of three! So, what am I selling, exactly?

A 2008 Jeep Wrangler X, 2 door, soft top, black exterior and gray interior. It has a 6 speed manual transmission, AM/FM/CD player (with an input for your iPhone - pictured - and heck, I'll even throw in the cord because honestly, I don't need to keep the cord if I don't have the Jeep. Why make you go run out to Best Buy and buy a cord when I can just give you the one I have?), but apart from that it is base model and stock.

It does not have an air conditioner or cruise control. I can see your shoulders slumping in disappointment. I know. I've lived it! Fortunately, this is a Jeep - which means that it has a soft top. So, on hot days, it is not only possible, but beneficial simply to pull the top down and revel in the open air as all the cars around you look at you and think "****, that looks like fun." They're right. It is fun. There are about 5-10 days a year where it is both hot AND rainy so the "putting the top down" trick doesn't work. Those days kind of suck. As far as the cruise goes, I only really notice the absence on long trips.

The pictures below were taken today (2/21/2011). It is now a bit rainy which means there will be water spots. No extra charge for any water spots collected - yours free!

If you've read this far, perhaps you're interested in the Jeep and want to know more? Let me make it clear that Wife is not up for sale - just the Jeep. Unless, of course, you're going to go all Indecent Proposal and offer a million dollars, in which case Wife will knock me out of the way to collect the money - as she rightly should. If you want to know more about the Jeep, or perhaps test drive or even buy it, please drop me an e-mail or call at (773) 340-3627.

If you call me, there is a 99% chance I won't answer. Why?

1) I work, and my ogre-like slave drivers (Hi Betty!) get annoyed when I spend all day goofing off.
2) I screen my calls.
3) I may be heavily involved in some PS3 game that requires my attention.

In any case, should I not answer, just leave a message. Google will transcribe it and I'll be right back with you.

.

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off