Friday, November 14, 2008

[It's the last Kekko Kamen Friday!!! Thanks to Insano Steve, we have a review of the Kekko Kamen series, a sleazy, Skinemaxish superhero movies straight from the headquarters of the strange, Japan. Insano Steve spared no expense in fleshing out the movies and you'll find his reviews stimulating and penetrating. Pun so intended!]

Japan is a country with no natural resources. It's basically a bunch of barren rocks floating in salt water. But the Japanese have made the most of this unfortunate situation by working 18-hour work days and maintaining a conservative culture. This obviously takes a toll on the Japanese psyche so there must be some outlet for these repressed overworked souls. Hello Hentai!

Hentai is the happy collision of cartoons and pornography. The Japanese really love their hentai because:

1.) They're perverts.

2.) One resource they have is great imaginations. Japan is the most technologically advanced nation in the world. They can't just watch the same old porn over and over.

3.) They are youth-obsessed. Hello-Kitty/J-Pop crap is a freaking big deal there. And so are cartoons.

Let's take a look at my favorite hentai (well hentai minus the penetration), the wonderful Kekko Kamen. This was an anime that was ironically turned into a series of live-action movies. Kekko Kamen (which means "Big Tit Avenger" in English), is the story of a girl, Mayumi, who attends the boarding school, "Toenail of Satan's Spartan Institute of Higher Education".

The school is run by sexual deviants (the ManGriffons/MFG) who use the school to grope, peep, molest and torture the students for their own sexual gratification (hey, like the Catholic Church!).

Her special attack is her flying headscissor move, the "Muffication", which works by asphyxiating her enemy with her radioactive vagina. Kekko’s civilian identity is the one non-pervert teacher at the school. Though this is not technically pornography, it is certainly perverted (in a good way of course) and plenty of fun.

END PROLOGUE

Here's a rundown of Kekko Kamen Surprise:

Oh fuck, where to begin. Part 4 here is utter shit. It seems like they pretty much blew the budget in part 3 and they produced this on $50.

Mayumi goes to Music school this time. Aki Hoshino is back in this one but looks like she filmed all her scenes in one day. She’s also shamefully wasted, as she’s mostly seen practicing violin in her lederhosen.

The perversion consists of a girl being tied naked to a see-saw, another girl being tied naked to a bass cello, and Aki being tickled with a feather.

Kekko eventually shows the girls her brand of music, by performing her own theme song on electric guitar. A sadly anti-climatic ending to this inspired series. Watching this, at times, I wondered, was it worth the $40 I paid the degenerate hentai dealer at that sleazy hotel room in New Jersey? But c’mon now, of course.

How else would I know of the splendid extents of cartoon-based perversion? As our beloved Kekko Kamen herself would say: “Panties are sacred to a woman. Wearing them on your head is unspeakable!” Profound stuff. Really makes you think......