Friday, 8 September 2017

Scene 1: An Unknown Interior - Time UnknownI was with my Mum - but I am not sure where we actually were, other than I think it was inside a building. My Mum was running her hand across my head, under my hair. She said that there was short, fuzzy hair (like soft stubble) under my normal, long hair. I think I saw myself in the third-person and specifically, the back of my head. I was worried about the fuzzy hair underneath my own hair, but then I thought that this was better than being bald - this fuzzy hair was new hair growing.I cannot recall anything else about this dream.

Extra Information:None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

My Mum as a dream character

Dreamsigns:

The weird fuzzy hair growing over my head

I saw myself in third-person perspective

Day Residue:

At the end of the summer I always suffer a lot of hair loss - more than usual, given I normally shed what looks to be an excessive amount of hair each day. I researched on the internet and found that summer hair loss is quite normal and healthy for some people. Even though this happens each year, I always notice and worry about it

Waking Reactions:Nothing to add - my reactions upon waking were the same as those within the dream itself and I cannot recall anything else about this dream.Dream 869 (MULTIPLE LUCID FALSE AWAKENINGS)

False Awakening #1 - My BedroomI went to bed with my bedroom light off and my door wedged wide open. The light from the hallway was on, partly illuminating my bedroom, and beyond this, the kitchen/lounge light was on. I often sleep this way when I am in my house by myself, as I have been for the entire summer. I have a new housemate, CGD moving in shortly. I woke up facing my wall, with the duvet on me. I realised after a moment that this was a lucid false awakening. I had sleep paralysis. It felt like I was mummified by the duvet, like it was weighing me down and wrapping round me, preventing me from moving. This is often the way I interpret the feeling of sleep paralysis (the physical sensation) when it is incorporated into my dream narrative/experience. I also had the common feeling of tension and electrified/vibrating atmosphere which accompanies my lucid false awakenings. I was not sure if I was alone, but I got the impression that if I kept thinking about it, that I might conjure something nightmarish into this dream.

I started shouting: 'Ewan!' hoping to bringEwan McGregorinto my dream. I usually try to bring him into my lucid dream experiences, because it is enjoyable and also reassuring. However, no matter how much I called out to him, he would not appear. I struggled to fight the sleep paralysis, urging my body to move. It felt like I was breaking myself free from some glue - unsticking myself very gradually, while a force was trying to hold me down. I eventually managed to sit up in bed - I could see that my bedroom door was open, but all the lights were off in the house. My room - what I could see of it, appeared as it should in real life, although I knew the hallway/lounge lights should be on. I could not see what was beyond my bedroom because of this. I was scared. I laid down and tried to fall back asleep by closing my 'dream eyes'. I must have been successful.False Awakening #2I woke up in another lucid false awakening with sleep paralysis. I could tell that there was a malign presence in the room with me, and I felt terrified. No matter how many times I have these continuous false awakenings or false awakenings accompanied by sleep paralysis and nightmarish beings, I cannot get used to them and stop myself feeling this scared. I could not break free from the sleep paralysis and I tried to call out to Ewan again, but to no avail, so once more, I closed my 'dream eyes' and tried to fall back asleep.False Awakening #3I woke up into a false awakening again, and immediately sprung up into a crouching position on my bed, outside of the duvet. However, I was unable to turn around and see what was behind me. In front of me, was my open bedroom door, and the darkness beyond that. I felt a presence in the room, behind me and was petrified, as I could not turn to see what it was or defend myself. I could, however, move my arms freely. I shook them, to maintain the movement, in case I needed to fight something. Again, I shouted out for Ewan, but there was nothing. Knowing that something behind me (unannounced presence, but anticipating an attack from it), I started shouting: 'I will kill you!' Nothing attacked me. I could not shake off the apprehension and fear, so I decided to close my eyes and visualise a new dream scene, as I am aware that this is a technique which can sometimes work in a lucid dream. I could not change the dream scene - I opened my eyes and saw I was still in my own bedroom. I felt trapped. False Awakening #4I woke up again, in a false awakening. I could not believe it! I decided to get out of bed and see if I could transform this false awakening into a different form of lucid dream by leaving my room. I had some degree of sleep paralysis which made my body feel like it was wading through treacle or sinking sand, but I was able to move slowly. I was also quite tangled in my duvet, which is another was in which I experience the physical phenomena of false awakenings with sleep paralysis. I eventually got out of bed, but it was so difficult to walk, that I only made it a couple of steps towards my chest of drawers. I found I could easily move my body to climb on top of the drawers (which are mid-thigh height, so very low). I crouched on top of them and noticed there was s felt-tip pen drawing there, rather than my PhD research. I looked towards my bedroom door, which was still open. This time I could see light. It was not the hall light, just outside my room, but rather the lounge light, which was a deep red colour in the dream state. I could see a large pile of belongings outside my bedroom, on the hall floor. It looked like a load of old junk and I wondered what it was, and who had put it here. I then wondered (lucidly) if this was supposed to represent the belongings of my new housemate. I could see one of the items was a large cymbal, and could make out some suitcases, but the rest of the items still looked like a load of junk. My vision was somewhat unclear because of the darkness and dim red glow of the light. I started shouting: 'Hello?!' feeling very anxious that I was about to be confronted with something malign/nightmarish, as I could still sense a presence in the house and knowing that my dream control was minimal, was worried I was under threat.A male figure came into view. He was very misshaped and deformed - with one shoulder hanging much lower than the other and crooked. He was wearing a baggy, ripped red jumper and ripped jeans, which was about all I could make out, mainly because he was standing in shadows and red light. He looked like a zombie/walking dead, as a result of his terrible form and posture. I wondered if he was my new housemate, CGD. He started to walk towards me - in a zombie-like crippled limp, dragging one of his feet behind him. I was anxious as I did not want this confrontation. It seemed to take him ages to reach my room, even though this is only a couple of steps from where he was standing in the hallway. As he approached me, all I could focus on was the red jumper. I thought this might be because I did not know what CGD looked like in real life, so my mind could not imagine his face. He said to me: 'I'm CGD, I moved in early'. I stood up and he hugged me. I stopped worrying that something nightmarish would happen and relaxed.I cannot recall anything else about this dream.

Extra Information:None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

None of note

Dreamsigns:

The Lucid False Awakening

Day Residue:

I had been talking about my new housemate and how I did not know what he looks like as I could not ascertain his Facebook profile when I was looking to see if I could find him online before meeting him

On the day of this dream DL and I had been discussing drums (and cymbals) and also how the vintage 1990s fashion trend does not translate well into the digital age, particularly the 'grunge' look, which was not about being 'fashionable' and had a very different set of aesthetics and ethics than the Instagram generation can ever appreciate when they attempt to recreate the looks and culture of this era. DL and I also very briefly discussed zombies

My new housemate has the same last name as an ex-boyfriend, who was a drummer

Waking Reactions:I actually anticipated a false awakening before I went to sleep, as I was so exhausted when I went to bed and felt myself falling asleep as soon as I laid down and closed my eyes. I always get this rocking/falling back feeling preceding a false awakening, so when I experienced this before sleep, I think I was actually anticipating this. It was neither a positive nor a negative experience, but it was certainly not enjoyable. I felt so hopeless and helpless while in this multiple false awakenings - it becomes so that I feel trapped by the experience and cannot bring it to an end.

Dream 870

'Grandad Peanut'

Date: 28 August 2017

Time: Time Unknown

Type of dream: Normal DreamDream recall: Normal recall

Scene 1: A Domestic Interior - DayI was in an unfamiliar domestic interior, which in the dream was a family home. My cousin HM was present - looking as she did when she was a young child, although in the dream we were both adult. It was daytime, as I could see this through a window in the room. There was a sofa against the wall and HM and I sat down on it. I then stood up again and stood in the middle of the room, looking towards a doorway, which led to the kitchen. An elderly man crawled through the doorway into the room HM and I were in, which I assume was the lounge. This man had a beard and was abnormally small and seemingly shrouded in an orange glow. I realised that this was my cousin HM's paternal grandfather, who (in real life) was nicknamed 'Peanut' (coincidentally. both HM's grandfathers - the maternal one she shares with me, given our mums are sisters - and her paternal one, who is no relation to me, have the exact same names, with the first and middle name switched - so RDC and DRC respectively). I went somewhere by myself - I do not know where. When I returned back to the family home some time later, members of my family were present, eating Christmas dinner. My Mum told me to get my serving, but when I approached the table where all the food was set out for people to help themselves, I realised there was none left for me (only scraps of food and none of the things I would most like to eat), which made me resentful and angry. Everyone was enjoying and my Mum shouted out jokingly 'Didn't anyone leave any for her?!' I felt disconnected and annoyed with my family for forgetting to save me some of the dinner. I then saw a male dream character who was a member of campus security (indicated by the hi-vis jacket with my university name/logo) standing at the window, looking in. This male was white, with dark hair and a moustache/beard - he looked to be in his 20s or early 30s. I then realised that there was something wrong with my teeth and that I needed an operation to correct it. I was really panicked and anxious and my Mum was nonchalant, telling me not to worry. She didn't seem to care. I looked in the mirror and saw that my 4 lower front teeth were really big and egg-shaped with gaps between them. One was made of pearl, one was made of black and white marble, one was white with brown speckles and one was rust coloured. I wondered how my teeth had transformed in this way, but the more I looked at them, I realised I actually liked how different they were from normal teeth and decided that I should keep them like this.I cannot recall anything else about this dream.Extra Information:None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

My Mum as a dream character

Something odd about my body, causing me anxiety which I overcome after inspecting it

Dreamsigns:

My cousin was an adult in a child's body

I think (I am not 100% sure) that my cousin's grandfather has died. I will check this with members of my family

My family had forgotten about me

Campus security was at my family home

My weird teeth

Day Residue:

I had a long discussion with the cleaner at university, DW, with whom I get on very well. We had discussed food and family, and I had shown her a photo of me as a child, which also had HM on it. We also talked about nut allergies

I had been discussing grandfathers with DL the day of this dream

I have anxiety about my teeth and had been thinking about them. Just before this dream I had read an online story about someone having dental surgery and had also watched a Grav3yardgirl video in which Bunny described how she is content and comfortable with her imperfect 'pony teeth' (her description)

Waking Reactions:I woke up from this dream in a very negative and depressed mood, which I attributed to the dream in my waking thoughts.

Dream 871'Ewan's Babymama'

Date: 29 August 2017

Time: Unknown

Type of dream: Normal DreamDream recall: Weak/Normal Recall

Scene 1: An Unknown Interior - DayThe dream started off in an interior - a house I think, although I am not sure. CEC and NN (both of whom I have been friends with since school) were present in the dream, although I am unable to say how they played a part in the dream narrative. There was also something relating to a piano, which I cannot recall clearly.Scene 2: A Bus Stop. Cromer - DayI was at a bus stop in Cromer, which was not the main bus stop (which featured in a recent dream - 'Dream 865 - 'Jimmy Savile Victim' inspired by a recent rape incident which took place in this location in real life). It was day time, but not sunny. I was sitting on the bench of the bus stop and I was aware that I was pregnant. I was joined by Ewan McGregor, who was the father of my unborn baby. I was not happy and I felt really oppressed and trapped by my relationship with Ewan, who was a moody and nagging person who constantly suffocated me with attention and lack of independence. I just wished I was on my own and not about to become a mother. Ewan just loitered over me, really close, so I did not have personal space. He was saying something (unrecalled) which I felt was negative and annoying. He was wearing a navy jumper and had his hair parted at the side, but other than that, looked exactly how he does in real life, in the present time. I cannot recall anything else about this dream.

Extra Information:None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

A bus stop in Cromer as a dream scene location

Ewan McGregor as a dream character

Not enjoying Ewan's company due to his bad personality

Dreamsigns:

I was pregnant and Ewan McGregor was the father

Day Residue:

None of note

Waking Reactions:This was really odd - I love Ewan so much that I cannot imagine being unhappy to be in a relationship with him. Although I do not want children, I would imagine that if I did, Ewan would be the man I would want to procreate with, given how obsessed I am with him! I am not sure what my subconscious was trying to tell me in this dream!

Dream 872'Female Darth Vader Impersonator'

Date: 2 September 2017

Time: Unknown

Type of dream: Vivid DreamDream recall: Strong Recall

Scene 1: A Flat/Restaurant, Norwich - NightI was with DL in a flat, which in the dream was above his real life flat. However, it was much bigger than would be possible for the real life size of the building. The flat was also a restaurant and was owned by a female dream character, who was a tall, slim white female with a black straight bobbed haircut (jaw-length) and dark eyeliner and lipstick. I knew that DL was attracted to her. On the TV in the flat, I could see that a video was playing. It was footage filmed by an amateur and featured the female dream character, who in her spare time was a 'Female Darth Vader Impersonator'. The video showed her dressed up as Darth Vader, but I did not hear the audio or know the context of the video. DL and I walked around the corner, where there was one table, with food laid out on it. The food was from the restaurant run by the female. There was a large cake stand (the multi-tiered ones you see high tea served on), with had hundreds of white bread rolls, with ham in them. DL informed me that the restaurant (it wasn't really a restaurant, but rather a flat that had a dinner table where you could eat food prepared by the female) was famous for giving you unlimited ham rolls with each meal ordered. I thought this was excellent value - as you could eat as many ham rolls as you wanted for free, no matter what you ordered. DL told me that the restaurant usually served Italian food. The female and I left the flat, while DL went down to his own flat. He was going to meet up a short while later after he had finished doing what he needed to do in his own flat. I noticed at this point, that instead of being located where DL's flat is in real life, it was in some kind of courtyard, with buildings forming a quadrangle. Scene 2: Common Lane, Sheringham - NightThe female and I walked off and instead of being in Norwich, we were suddenly standing on Common Lane, Sheringham, which is the road which leads up to my Nan's house. We were standing outside a tall building, which the female told me was DL's house (instead of being a house, it was a block of flats). She said we were to meet him outside his house, and he was inside with the woman that lived above him - who he was in a relationship with. I did not question the fact that in the previous dream scene we had left the building DL apparently lived in, and the 'female resident' who lived above him had been the woman with whom I was not standing, not someone else. We were waiting for ages, just talking. I then received a phone call from DL. I asked him why he had not come out of his building. He said that he had, and that he was looking for us. I then realised that we had been at his house before (when in the female's flat/restaurant) and that the female had led me to Sheringham by mistake. I said to her: 'DL lives in your building, we didn't need to come here!' She laughed at her mistake and we walked back to the building she lived in, which was DL's home. Extra Information:

None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

Food

Dreamsigns:

The flat/restaurant with the Female Darth Vader impersonator

DL's house was in a random courtyard

We walked from DL's flat (Norwich) to Common Lane, Sheringham in a matter of minutes, but in real life, this is a 25 mile (or more) distance

The dream logic was completely distorted - the Female Darth Vader impersonator forgot DL lived in the same building as her, and while she was the resident in the flat above him, she later seemed to suggest that there was a different woman living above DL, with whom he was in a relationship, although in the dream I put this down to the fact she had been confused about the locations

I had been chatting to a guy online and he asked me if I liked to do Star Wars cosplay. He was trying to get me to talk about cosplay in a flirty. sexual way and got annoyed with me when I said I did not want to have a sexual conversation with him

DL and I had been discussing gender-bending of fictional characters in popular culture shortly before this dream

DL has Italian heritage

DL had recently complained to me about the woman who lived above him, who makes a lot of banging and also orders takeaways late at night, often resulting in the delivery person ringing DL's doorbell and annoying him. He hates this woman, so he found it funny that in the dream he was in a relationship with a woman who lived above him

Waking Reactions:I found this dream really confusing while I was dreaming it, but reflecting on it, it was actually a very enjoyable and funny dream.

Dream 873'Incompetent Star Wars Remake, featuring 'Binmanwoman''

Date: 4 September 2017

Time: 05:00 - 12:00

Type of dream: Vivid DreamDream recall: Strong Recall

Scene 1: Sheringham Market - DayI was in Sheringham market (this happens on a Saturday), which looked as it used to when I visited it each weekend as a child/teenager, except it was slightly larger and had some interesting clothes stalls with fashion items which would unlikely to be in the actual real life market, and more suitable to somewhere like Camden or Wembley Market (both of which I regularly visited when I lived in London). I was with a huge group of dream characters and we were involved in a remake of all the Star Wars movies - the dream characters I was with were the cast and crew. We were remaking the movies in chronological order, starting with Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999). Sheringham market was supposed to be Tatooine. I wanted to play Padme Amidala, but instead, I was cast as a character called 'Binmanwoman' which I was not happy about. The filming seemed disorganised and chaotic - no-one seemed to know what they were doing, and everyone was just standing around debating how to best start this project. I got bored and wandered over to a market stall which sold pens. I wanted to buy some green biros, and I asked the man who ran the stall if he had a scrap of paper for me to test them out. He was moody and rude, and handed me some paper, which I scribbled on to test the green pens out. I decided to buy them, and then returned to the Star Wars cast and crew to continue filming.Scene 2: The Crown Public House, SheringhamThe next scene where we were filming the new Star Wars remake was The Crown pub in Sheringham. I noticed that some locals - who I knew from when I lived in Sheringham - were in the pub, sitting in the part of the room where the fruit machine and dartboard is, just to the side of the entrance/bar. CSS and TC were present, as well as a couple of other locals. They were all having fun, laughing and drinking pints of beer. We were waiting to film a scene where the child Anakin Skywalker is first introduced into the story, as a child slave. However, the actor playing (adult/Sith Lord) Darth Vader came in, prematurely. He looked very threatening, but instead of having the black Darth Vader costume, he just looked like a very tall man - resembling a much larger and younger Will Self, wearing normal clothes of the type you might expect Will Self to wear (a tweed jacket and shirt). He also spoke with Will Self's voice, so in the dream I perceived this actor to actually be 'Will Self'. The only thing odd about his appearance was that his lower jaw was robotic and made of plastic/metal (white) and was protruding, having been bolted on with big brown bolts at either side, which made him look terrifying (his actual jaw had fallen off during his 'days as a football thug' - in the dream I was aware of his history and the fact that he had undergone reconstructive surgery to replace his lost lower jaw with a cybernetic/robotic one, which I guess is pretty fitting for someone playing Darth Vader!). Darth Vader was not supposed to even be in this movie (given it we were staying fairly loyal to the premise of The Phantom Menace and therefore, Anakin was still only a small child). Everyone was so scared of the Darth Vader actor and his history as a football thug/hooligan that no-one dared to tell him that he was not required 'on set' until we filmed the end of the third movie (Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)). The Director of the movie came in from the beer garden at the back of the pub, with the child playing Anakin (looking very much identical to Jake Lloyd, the real actor who played child Anakin), on his shoulders. The Director looked a lot like George Lucas, but he was a 'local' (so not actually George Lucas in the dream) and he wore a Safari Suit as he was doubling up as Qui-Gon Jinn (for some reason the Jedis were all wearing weird outfits that did not resemble the correct costumes from Star Wars). He stood with 'Anakin' beside the cigarette machine/men's toilets (so just a short distance from where I was standing with Will Self/Darth Vader) and said words to the effect of: 'I'll re-write it so Anakin is a child and an adult at the same time'. Basically he meant he would edit the script to incorporate the Vader character as he was too scared to tell Will Self/Vader he wasn't needed on set for filming yet. I thought the Director was a pussy. The child Anakin looked like he had been crying as his face was very red. The Will Self/Darth Vader very impatiently ordered a drink at the bar and started showing off, boasting about his expensive designer watches and showing off the really flashy and fancy one he was wearing for the Darth Vader role. Everyone was being super polite to him, to keep him in a good mood and admiring/complimenting his watch, which was making him act more smug and annoying. I thought he was rude, arrogant and aloof. I was standing beside him. The drink he ordered was some form of cocktail (brown, in a short, squat glass) and I offered to pay for it, to do my bit to keep him in a good mood. He said: 'I'm very rich from being Darth Vader' and paid for the drink himself, with a banknote which he waved in my face in an aggressive way.A waiter then approached and put some plates down on the bar which he had cleared from some tables of diners. The leftover food on the plates were huge piles of boiled cauliflower - bigger portions than you would serve for a huge banquet, let alone a single serving. I was surprised that food was being served while we were using the pub to film our Star Wars remakes. I wandered into the kitchen where I saw 2 male chefs, in chef's uniforms. One of the chefs was Indian heritage, the other was white. Both seemed to be older than me. I was aware that both chefs were also playing Jedis in the film. I thought this was bad casting as neither of them looked like Jedis and they both seemed to have bad attitudes.The Indian chef said sarcastically to the other: 'Oh, it's Binmanwoman'. I felt both famous and annoyed at my character name. The kitchen looked like a dark concrete basement. There were more huge plates piled high with cauliflower, awaiting a waiter taking them for service. One of the chefs angrily pushed a metal bell to summons a waiter to take the food. Then both chefs stripped naked and then started wrestling on the floor in a 'blood orgy' (they were covered in blood, almost immediately - I did not see how this happened). It did not seem as if the blood was from physical injury to either chef, but was just a 'prop' to help them have more fun wrestling. I walked back into the main bar and rejoined Darth Vader and other members of cast, crew and locals drinking in the pub. A man in a grey suit with a clipboard then entered the pub. He was in his 40s/50s and looked very official - and also not happy with what he saw. He informed all of us that this pub was actually the 'Eastenders set' and it was unlawful to serve food while there was a blood orgy between the chefs. I was aware he was an Environmental Health Inspector and had the power to do these actions. He ordered us to stop filming Star Wars in this pub and said that he would be shutting down the kitchen for hygiene reasons. I cannot recall anything else about this dream.

I had watched a space documentary on the day of this dream, which showed a recent discovery of a planet which orbits around 2 suns - like Tatooine

I had been watching true crime documentaries on the day of this dream and in one, the mother of a murder victim referred to a 'lady policeman' which made me laugh, despite the tragic circumstances of what she was talking about

I had been thinking about buying some new pens as I noticed that the ones I have been using seem to be running out of ink

I saw my Stepdad post a reference to The Crown on Facebook a couple of days before this dream

A few days before this dream I had been telling DL about a documentary I watched about the 'Radium Girls' - female factory workers in America at the start of the 20th century, who suffered radiation poisoning after employers at United States Radium Corporation failed to warn them of the dangers of working with radium and actually instructed them to lick the paintbrushes they used to paint watch dials, to keep the tips precise and pointed. As a result of constantly ingesting radium and also painting their faces with the luminous radium paint for fun, many of the woman developed necrosis of the jaw ('known as 'radium jaw' or 'phossy jaw') and litigation was initiated against US Radium Corp, who denied responsibility, even though it was alleged that many of the more senior workers were aware of the danger of radiation exposure

I had been watching a documentary about the 'road rage murderer' Tracie Andrews, who has been in the media recently as a result of her marriage to a man she met while working as a server in a pub (after her release from the life sentence she served following the murder of her partner, Lee Harvey in 1996). The article about Andrews' life post-release referred to an operation she had to correct her jaw - her lower jaw protruded too far. I coincidentally watched another true crime documentary about a child who was murdered and found in the wood. His body was dismembered and decapitated and his lower jaw (described as a lower mandible) had been removed and never found

I vaguely recall hearing/seeing a reference to expensive watches somewhere (probably online) shortly before this dream

I had seen someone tag CSS on Facebook a day or so before this dream - I do not have CSS on my Facebook, so this was the first time he had come to my attention in years. I think the person who tagged him was TC - which would explain his presence in this dream as well. I certainly recall seeing TC post something on Facebook around this time, as I recall thinking about what he was like when he was younger and we were good friends

I had been watching some true crime documentaries about Satanic cults, which contained references to 'blood orgies'

I had been watching Celebrity Masterchef - one of the older series I had been re-watching had a number of Eastenders actors as contestants

Waking Reactions:This dream was absolutely amazing and so vivid. I enjoyed it so much, and took a lot of pleasure remembering it when I woke up. The narrative involved so many aspects of Day Residue, interwoven in a fascinating and humorous way.

Dream 874'I Love You'

Date: 7 September 2017

Time: 06:30 - 12:00

Type of dream: Vivid DreamDream recall: Strong Recall

Scene 1: My Nan's House, SheringhamI was in my Nan's house in Sheringham, although in the dream this house looked to be much larger and was actually the home of my love interest, who I will refer to as 'RDTA', and a very long distance away from where I lived. My bedroom in my Nan's house looked pretty much the same as it does in real life, and this was where RDTA and I were in the dream. The second bed (which used to be in this room when I shared it with my Mum as a child) was there once again and there were a number of items which I was looking at. RDTA was dressed in a white hoody and grey tracksuit bottoms.I had been invited to RDTA's house to spend time with him, and in the dream I found this to be odd as I did not think that he would want me to know where he lived. I just wanted to be sexually intimate with him, but RDTA was not initiating anything and I was too nervous to initiate physical contact myself. Even though I had been invited, RDTA did not seem to be interested in my company at all and he had invited a number of his male friends round, who were in another room, rowdy and making a considerable amount of noise. I kept asking RDTA if he wanted me around and he sort of indicated that he wanted me to leave and regretted inviting me to his house (as I now knew where he lived). In the dream I was actually surprised that he had trusted me with his address. RDTA was messing around with his phone (texting or checking messages) and I was anxious in case he had a girlfriend. I was really jealous and I just wanted to communicate my feelings to him. I took a blue biro and wrote in large capital letters on the second bed (which actually seemed to be made of wood) 'I LOVE YOU'. Then I regretted it and while RDTA was still looking at his phone, I tried to wipe it off with a cloth I found on the bed. The writing was really difficult to wipe off - almost impossible, no matter how hard I rubbed at it. RDTA came over and looked at the writing. I was embarrassed and realised I did not want him to know I was in love with him after all as I could not stand the rejection. I tried to cover the writing (which was still largely intact) with my hand before he could read it, but it was obvious he had already seen what it said. I apologised for writing on 'his bed'. RDTA asked me when I was leaving, as he wanted to spend time with his male friends. I got the impression that he actually wanted to see another woman instead, which was why he was trying to get me to leave. I said I would leave now, but I then realised that I needed to take a number of connecting trains and the journey home would take me an entire day. As it was now 16:00 hours, I would not be able to get a connecting train; it was far too late. I asked if RDTA minded if I stayed the night and left early in the morning. At this point, he seemed to relent and relax and said that I was welcome to stay. He presented me with a bouquet of flowers and I felt really happy now, because he was warmer and friendlier than he had been earlier. We went downstairs and he explained that this was his parents' house and he lived here with them. The downstairs of the house was also my Nan's house - and looked pretty much the same as it does in real life. On the table was a woman's handbag and some other items. RDTA started picking up the items and wrapping them in some gift wrap. I wondered if these were presents for a girlfriend or someone he fancied, and again, I felt very jealous. One of the items was a crocheted white blanket. RDTA then explained that his sister had just given birth to a baby and these were presents for her and his niece/nephew (I cannot recall the gender of the baby). I was again relieved. There was other action in this dream which I cannot recall, even though I think I was able to remember more of this dream when I first woke up from it. If I recall anything else I will record it below.Extra Information:

None of noteRecurrent Dream Themes:

Sheringham as a dream scene location

Dreamsigns:

My Nan's house was RDTA's house

Day Residue:

I was talking to a guy (from my local area) on Tinder and he was pressurising me to give him my address as we share the same postcode. When I refused to give my address to him - basically he was a complete stranger and I had only been talking to him for a few minutes at that point - he got annoyed with me. I hate Tinder and am never tempted to date my matches when we start chatting as they are either rude or just not right for me. I have an idea of who my ideal man would be (the RDTA in this dream), but it seems like I will not ever be with this person in real life - hence the feelings of frustration and unrequited love in this dream, which symbolises and conveys my waking thoughts

Waking Reactions:This dream was quite negative for me as I felt undesirable to a man I saw as my ideal partner. I think this dream adequately sums up the state of my love life right now - non-existent.