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Thursday, December 31, 2015

"Do not lose you”, and other things I wish I could have told my 16 year-old self

Don’t listen to them. You are not what they think of you.

You are not a burden, you are wanted, appreciated, loved - maybe not by those who you expect to accept you, but by those who chose to fall in love with your soul.

Be gentle with yourself, it is all you have.

Do not lose you. And if you do, find yourself. You are hiding behind emotional landmines, torrential rainstorms, waiting to be found. But don’t ask others to save you. They are busy saving themselves.

Speak freely, and without hesitation. Somebody should be telling you how much your voice is worth. Don’t quiet down. Listen, but listen also to yourself.

Breathe. The pain will remain, but over time your tears will dry faster. It is okay if you need time to heal, it is okay if you are a mess.. and stay a mess.. for a while. You have to know that that is okay. Do not rush your process. Breathe.

Trust your unfolding. Life, and people and society and expectations will try to mold you into a human being that no longer resembles you. Do not give in. You are you for a million and one reasons.

Be kind, even when they are unkind to you. You are not the one losing this battle. Your scars will light your way at night and teach you things others will never fathom. Learn. Even if you are tired.

Walk away from things. You need very little in life to survive – do not be held down by things you falsely think are vital to your being. If they no longer serve their purpose of contributing to your happiness, well-being or education, walk away. Do not offer up your time to things devoid of value to your soul.

Rest your mind amid the noise. Allow yourself to see clearly, even when things are running amok around you. Slow your mind down. Ease into your thinking. Decipher your emotions. Your anxiety does not own the rights to your peace-of-mind.

Love yourself first. You have nothing to offer the world when you do not see the beauty of the undying pitter-patter in the way your own heart beats for itself. You are not selfish, you are not self-absorbed. You are a fragile, furious, and free being, eyes full of silent thunder, hair wildly whipping in the weather changes, and heart bruised, battered and beautiful. Do not wait for happiness to come to you. It is already within you, in places you had forgotten you hid it, the day you decided to protect your little heart.