I noticed that someone I know in Sweden had broken up with their partner and the list of comments was long after the status update. Many of them were something like “oh no, what a shame/pity” and that had me thinking a bit (like I always do).

Sure, it is sad when a relationship doesn’t last, because breakups obviously makes people feel sad. But I’m not inclined to agree with it being a shame or a pity. Because honestly, it isn’t really, is it?

The relationship ended because two people weren’t meant to be together anymore. To me, it’s not a pity then, it’s more like something positive, that it actually ended – especially because the people in question are brave enough to let it end. Far too many people live in relationships that they don’t enjoy or that make them feel bad in one way or another.

There is, in my opinion, no reason what so ever to be with someone if it doesn’t make you feel good. Because somewhere out there, there’s guaranteed to be someone who will make you feel really good. So why waste your time hanging out with the wrong person?

I’ve been there myself, when you feel that the relationship you’re in isn’t gonna last, and that you’re not really clicking on a deeper level anymore with that other person. And yet, I still stayed in that relationship for far longer than I should have.
I thought it was safe. But I was only fooling myself. Wrong is never safe.
But eventually you realise all that, and hopefully you’ll learn something from it too – at least I did, thank goodness! It made me realise that you don’t deserve anything less than a person who loves you unconditionally, despite your flaws and quirks and despite the fact that maybe sometimes you have different opinions.

I think you should be proud of the fact that you dared to take the step and break up, if something isn’t working. Of course, that does not mean you should give up if you have a dip in your relationship (hey, everyone has them sometimes). You need to figure out where to draw the line; when you need to see that all this work we’ve put in isn’t working out. That’s when you walk away. And hopefully, you do that with a slightly lighter heart, despite the sorrow you feel. To me that’s something good, because then you know that you deserve more and that both parties will probably feel better when separated.

So when someone’s going through a breakup I see it best to comfort and support, and at the same time brace them, “you’re goodlooking, always smiling and incredibly nice. You got this!”
Because it’s true. Even the heart heals eventually.
And then suddenly, when you least expect it, prince or princess charming is waiting just around the corner.