Don’t Be The Dead Guy At The Bottom Of A Cliff

Uncrate did a roundup of keychain “essentials” that you will probably never need, but will have a shit load of fun showing off to your friends when you’re six beers deep and there’s nobody of the opposite sex within a 150-foot radius. There’s knives, lighters, aircraft cables, 19-in-1 multitools and a motherfucking corkscrew! What’s even better is that everything is under $30. Seriously though, if I’m ever in a car crash in the Rocky Mountains and my car somehow ends up dangling off of a cliff, I’m sure glad I’ll be able to take the keys out of the ignition, climb into the backseat and have a keycahin attachment that comes equipped with a spring-loaded head that smashes through glass with 12 lbs. of force to break the rear window so I escape to safety. There’s a good chance that will never happen to me seeing as I don’t have a driver's license, but I’m pretty sure that’s what the dead asshole at the bottom of a 2,000 ft. cliff said.