None of this would have happened if I had just found a Boom-box. I have a cassette tape of the '09-'11 Discography for Walter Mitty and His Makeshift Orchestra. For weeks, I've desperately tried to locate a compatible playing device. My luck has been dull and uninterested. Today was no different.

The morning began with an early dip into the Pacific Ocean. Its waters were brisk, its tides turning, its currents sweeping. In the middle of summer, a time when temperatures usually fail to dictate actions, I was forced to cover my body with a suit made of rubber, one that could withstand the cold, wet personality of the ocean - a wet suit. My reason for entering the Pacific on this early morning was not for pleasure. My path to the ocean was laid by education. More specifically, the education of water safety. I care not to go into it any further for it would only serve to pull me further off topic, but before I abandon my tangential ways, once and for all, let me tell you a funny thing that happened this morning. A Swiss man accompanied by four children - 3 of his own and a friend of his youngest son. In the sand, the man attempted to dress in his wetsuit, a towel wrapped around his waist covering his nude bottom half. As the man needed a lesson in ocean safety, it is fair to say he did not possess a great deal of balance. Wobbling, the rubber of the suit stretching and tangling around his feet, the man toppled over, falling into the sand. His towel, rebellious in the commotion of the fall, was now draped over his head and no longer covering his bottom half. The man's johnson was staring all of us in the face. Turning away, startled with laughter, I then heard the voice of a disgruntled, irritated child, "Cover it up, dude!" Which brave child had the nerve to say this to such an unbalanced man? I thought surely it was one of his children, but NAY! It was the friend. The friend was the one! The man was neither embarrassed nor upset, he simply got to his feet and continued to change. An admirable display of perseverance. A rare show of bravery and straightforward slander. Today, we are so used to such roundabout, backwards incidents of informational transactions. The directness was refreshing.

I want to keep writing this but I'm afraid the short, little story i have told has done more than I had estimated to whip me off course. My mood has suddenly changed, and I fear it could have horrible ramifications. Please understand my mood has not soured because of you, in anyway. No, my mood has been splintered and blown up by the uncontrollable, throbbing pain of hunger. The pit appears to be in an alleyway knife fight with my gut. The hunger is horrendous and I am cursed with extreme bouts of anger and violence. All of which, are induced by my hunger. To protect myself and you...I have decided to put my story on pause. Tomorrow, we'll pick back up....it will involve YOGA, SUSHI, and a BICYCLE RIDE. Tune in to hear how it all ends - the story, that is. The hunger ends now.