Man, I have this strange love for daddies and I really want to experience a relationship or even sexual relationship with one, but it seems that none of them ever pay attention to me or even look at me with a interested look. And I'm not being cocky but I do have an okay body and okay looks

For people who has found an older guy, how did you meet them and how did you get things rolling? I want to hear some stories

VerifiedGold Member

Son, you got good looks. Taking on a young person is a lot of work... and a big responsibility. That is if one takes it seriously. Treating you like a plaything requires emotional narcissism. My hope is you meet up with someone that wants to take the time to build something WITH you... not just do things TO you.

And I feel the same way I dont want to be treated like a plaything, and these people online sites that I have met just want to meet up and sexup and then leave, I wish meeting a daddy was as easy as meeting someone my age sometimes.. I never know how to approach a man, men are just so intimidating to be honest LOL! Why can't I be attracted to people my age!!!!

VerifiedGold Member

All "others" are intimidating. An older man is just someone that's been where you've been before... a "you plus"... a peer with experience.

You meet us and engage with us the same way you do with anyone your same age. You find common ground around anything and build from there. Make comments, asking questions, sharing yourself. It's no different really.

VerifiedGold Member

One other idea I'd like to share... I think it's easier on you and feels like less of a responsibility for the older person the closer the age difference. So maybe starting off with a smaller age gap is the way to get going and work your way up.

Gold Member

Also take into account the possibility that older men aren't approaching you themselves because they assume you wouldn't be interested in them, that you'd want someone your own age. So you may need to be the more forward one.

Man, I have this strange love for daddies and I really want to experience a relationship or even sexual relationship with one, but it seems that none of them ever pay attention to me or even look at me with a interested look. And I'm not being cocky but I do have an okay body and okay looks

For people who has found an older guy, how did you meet them and how did you get things rolling? I want to hear some stories

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Kid, you seem to be asking for two different things. You wonder why no one is leering at you and checking you out; but then you state you want something deeper than a brief sexual encounter.

I'd suggest that you need to build non-sexual relationships with older men first, there are lots of ways if you think about it.

Gold Member

Last year a 28 year old lawyer contacted me on gay.com. He was into daddies (shocked me to be thought of as a daddy). He sent me pictures of himself and he was quite good looking. The more we chatted, the less impressed I became with him as he started to "sound" like a 15/16 year old instead of a well educated lawyer.

Needless to say, I stopped chatting with him. I want an equal, not a dependant and certainly not a child.

Okay... personally speaking, and I repeat this, I am speaking from experience, whenever I have dated someone considerably younger than me I have ALWAYS been expected to fund the 'affair'. Hard being equal with someone on this level. Having said that there are many men who have found love and happiness in substantially diverse age groups. Keep looking. Que sera, sera....

Okay... personally speaking, and I repeat this, I am speaking from experience, whenever I have dated someone considerably younger than me I have ALWAYS been expected to fund the 'affair'. Hard being equal with someone on this level. Having said that there are many men who have found love and happiness in substantially diverse age groups. Keep looking. Que sera, sera....

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That happened to me a couple times and they were only a few years younger... LOL

As a guy who is into guys in their forties and fifties and was seeing them in my late teens and early twenties, here's what I found.

Be careful about older guys who make it too easy to reach them and get involved. I'm sure some and maybe even most of them are cool, but some are not. They may be older, but they're not blind, and getting laid with a sexy young guy sounds good to them. And they know you haven't been around the block as much as someone a little older, so it's easy for them to have fun and then be done with you. Be wary! They're not all like that, but some of them are, and you'll feel pretty stupid on your way home when you've just fucked a guy who you already know just wanted to get off with someone hot but is never going to want to see you again.

There are also sad older guys. They may feel old, lonely, and unattractive. Being approached by anyone is a dream come true, and the fact that you're a sexy young guy is a liability for you again because that makes it twice as awesome for them. It doesn't take long to realize what it's about because they'll be so desperate for your affection and approval (they're prone to telling you they love you right after the first time you fuck them), but by then it already sucks for you because you'll know you only have two options, keep seeing them, or disappoint them. You never want to hurt anyone, but in these cases it's better to let them down sooner than later if you're sure he isn't what you're looking for.

Then there are the ones who aren't crafty or sad, but suspect you might be one of those things. It makes sense from their perspective. In their eyes, being young and hot means you could get someone similar instead of settling for an older, balding guy, so if you want them, you probably just want a sugar daddy to worship you, take you out for nice meals, and buy you stuff. Or they might think you've had bad luck with guys similar to yourself, and while it would be good for them that you want them, it's a Fatal Attraction situation waiting to happen. You can bring these guys around, but it might take time to win their trust and make them believe you really do think they're awesome and sexy. Worth it if you're willing to invest the effort, and if you're not, maybe their assumptions are a little bit right.

Then there are those who are just the best of the best. They think you're hot without thinking you're a plaything. They love you without it being a creepy and oppressive parental thing. If there's a financial difference, they understand and can handle it fairly without anyone feeling bad or getting used. Etc.

Keep looking even though it's hard to find the right person. Have high standards even though it's easy to compromise. Be careful because you could get hurt or hurt someone else. Same rules as with any relationship, come to think of it.

Arthur said:

Okay... personally speaking, and I repeat this, I am speaking from experience, whenever I have dated someone considerably younger than me I have ALWAYS been expected to fund the 'affair'. Hard being equal with someone on this level. Having said that there are many men who have found love and happiness in substantially diverse age groups. Keep looking. Que sera, sera....

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Definitely a challenge. I've always been the younger one in my younger/older relationships, and before I was established in my career, the older guys I was seeing obviously had far more money than me. It can be a drag knowing someone is paying your way or as you aptly put it, funding the affair, even if they assure you it's their pleasure. And of course I knew perfectly well how it might be a drag for them, too. You're so right about the equality issue. Sometimes the mutual equality can be maintained anyway, but not always, and that's just life because money breeds weird feelings in people. If either party senses even a minor disturbance because of the difference in financial conditions, it's best to say so up front and consider the possibility that this might not work, at least until the younger person gets set up themselves.

Yes, there are younger men who are attracted to older men. There are probably a variety of reasons why, but the most obvious guess would be that they did not have a good relationship with their own fathers and are trying, in some way, to "make it up to themselves".

Yes, there are younger men who are attracted to older men. There are probably a variety of reasons why, but the most obvious guess would be that they did not have a good relationship with their own fathers and are trying, in some way, to "make it up to themselves".

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For all the temptation there is to attach some deep-seated psychological trauma to every aspect of sexuality, the fact is that middle aged men are sexy and some younger men are not only open-minded enough to realize that, but also mature enough to relate better to a 45-year-old than the generally juvenile and flaky excuses for 18-25 year olds our society has been producing for a generation or two. Maybe there are a few young guys out there who just want to fuck an older guy because of their "daddy issues," but I think you give that possibility too much credit.

There's something sad about me I met this daddy, he is near his 30s but he is a dad and i know for sure he is gay or bi, we have GOT into these things but never INTO-INTO u know? we've said things about our bodies, dicks, etc etc and he told me "he has a secret love" also he is in a strong foght with his wife, they haven't had sex for a LONG WHILE and when we are in the car we are holding hands, we go out to dinner or take some drinks, we text each other, we go together to restrooms, we share same spoon (sometimes) and cups, i told him i got naked pictures of my self and he asked me to show em to him i was freaked out a STRAIGHT MAN wouldn't ask me, right? then we go on a fight and then we talked and everything's right between him and me, How can i go way FURTHER with him? we haven't talked for a week and i really miss him but he is outta my city and i'm sending messages to him and he havent reply me it feels SO EFFING BAD!!! and i don't know if i love him or if am confused or just SEX!