Yesterday at jens hotel party was fun we swam too much tho lol but then during the night well im not gonna go into detail but i got really sad and wanted to go home because of some stuff and then everybody got mad at me, but after a while we talked about it and they understood and everything but im still im not ina good mood....i swear im starting to scare myself. All i can ever think about is dieing, and i don't want to do it myself but im starting to think it may be the only way. I cant do this anymore im so sick of this shit.