Saturday, May 25, 2013

Divorce decree for the United States of America!

What would a United States divided along liberal and non-liberal lines look like?

Because our ideas for America's future appear to be diametrically opposed with irreconcilable differences that will be nearly impossible to successfully mediate away, imagine what an America divided into purely Red and Blue states with like citizenry would look like.

I've seen this before but on Memorial Day, as we honor the men and women of the military who made the ultimate sacrifice to help preserve our American way of life, it is very much worth repeating.

DIVORCE AGREEMENT

THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al: We have stuck together since the late 1950's for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.

Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a our separation agreement:

--Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

--We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.

--You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

--Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military.

--We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and you can go with wind, solar and biodiesel.

--You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.