Have you ever gone to a sporting event and seen someone on the subway wearing the same jersey as you and said, “Hey”? Why’d you do that? Was it simply because they were wearing the same clothes as you?

Why fitting in is important

The most basic human desire is to feel like you belong. Fitting in is important. When we see that someone supports the same team we do, we feel a sort of bond, for no other reason than that we perceive that we share something in common with them.

Our desire to feel like we belong is so strong that we seek it out. This is what gangs offer a teenager in the inner city. With no strong family unit and no strong school bonds, a young, disenfranchised man or woman will join a gang to feel like a part of something. That sense of belonging is important to us because with a sense of belonging, with a sense that we are surrounded by people who understand us and see the world as we see it, we feel more comfortable. We feel safer. We’re even able to form bonds of trust much easier.

Fitting in at Comic Con

Last week I attended Comic Con in New York City. The event, which attracts thousands of comic book, movie, anime, and manga enthusiasts from across the country and around the world, is like a big geek convention. The black sheep of their schools, families and the general population, the ones labeled misfits simply because they are a little too into graphic novels, video games and their characters, all descend upon Comic Con like Mecca.

I’m one of those black sheep. I’m one of those geeks. I love science fiction — always have. I went to Space Camp as a kid, I have little Boba Fett busts and caricatures on my desk and I can often be heard making obscure references to or quoting lines from Star Wars. I like stories of the classic hero, of good versus evil, the ones in which the good guys wear white and the bad guys wear black… and I love a good sword fight. But I’d never been to a Comic Con before, even though I’d always wanted to.

I have friends who are majorly into the cosplay culture and have urged me to go to a convention for no other reason than to meet others like me. And so I did. I recognize, however, that there is a difference between attending and participating. I understand that to watch from the sidelines does not make you a part of the game. And so I decided that, for my first con, I was gonna go all out. I enlisted the help of a couple of friends — my friend Miracole (miracole.com), who is pretty big into the cosplay world, hooked me up with an amazing costume and my friend Kendra went to the convention with me.