Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Darwin Award Winners

I was watching "Maximum Exposure" aka "Max X", it's one of those home movie/video clip shows. You've probably seen tons of these clips on TV and/or on the Internet. I was watching a "When Animals Attack" type episode. And this is when I get upset with people, as a species.

As a species, we are some dumb, Dumb, DUMB creatures. We do stupid things, and somehow survive to do more dumb, stupid things. One lady is at the zoo with her family, looking at the polar bears and she decides to climb the gate CLEARLY marked "DANGER! Do Not Cross Safety Rail", she stands right next to the cage's bars to take a better picture. What could possibly happen? The polar bear grabs her and almost rips her leg off. What was her comment afterwards? "I was so surprised that he did that?"

Another genius is at a safari, where the animals are free, but you are caged in your own car. He's not getting good enough footage of the lions, so he decides that he'll GET OUT OF HIS CAR! Why not? He's read enough comicbooks to be able to move as fast as The Flash. Does he shoot from right outside his car with the door open? No. There's no challenge in that. He closes the door, walks about ten feet away and focuses on the lions a few yards away. SOMEHOW one lion gets behind him and attacks him. The guy is mauled, and is almost killed. I think he lost an eye, part of a leg, and is partially paralyzed, after spending a few days in a coma. His comments afterwards, "I thought I had the situation under control. Wow, those lions really are some dangerous creatures!"

And those were just two! It was a whole hour of idiots. The worst part is that most of them survived to pass their "superior genetics" on to future generations.

People like that need to shoot for the Darwin Award for the betterment of all mankind.