From the Depths of the Chasm

From the depths of the deep chasm, also known as the “depths of the deep chasm” by the locals, rose a terrifying creature whose name was “terrifying creature.” The local tribe, who called themselves the “local tribe,” feared this “terrifying creature” for it ruined their crops every year and also cheated at poker. One day, a child was born, and the “local tribe” deemed that he would be their savior, and named him.

They name him “Cuttlefish.”

He at first appeared to be a prodigy. The “local tribe” began training him at birth, and at the somewhat young age of two days, “Cuttlefish” learned how to cry louder. At seven months, “Cuttlefish” could do the difficult task of crawling, and learned to talk at the unusually young age of three. However, the “local tribe” began to worry when it wasn’t until “Cuttlefish” was nearly six years old before he was able to shoot his first fireball. At the age of forty six, “Cuttlefish” was a successful stockbroker at Wall Street.

The day finally arrived when “Cuttlefish” confronted “terrible creature.” He stalked up to the red-scaled beast and stared into its jaded eyes.

Whump! A fat wad of cash hit the ground. “You there, ‘terrible creature.’ Leave and you may have this ‘fat wad of cash.'”

“Terrible creature” breathed smoke at the stockbroker. “You realize money has no value to me, right?”

“Cuttlefish” stared, open mouthed at “terrible creature.” Money? No value? It just didn’t make sense to “Cuttlefish.”

“You, what’s your name?” it asked the stockbroker.

“‘Cuttlefish…'” he said under his breath, trying his best to sound brave.

“Ha. You also have quotes around your name? Ridiculous. What I want is just a name! Without quotes” the beast cried and shoot the world.

“Cuttlefish” furrowed his brow. He wasn’t sure how the beast could tell his name had quotes. Just a name? Justaname… “How about Justin Ame?” he suggested.

Justin roared with delight. “I love that name! How did you ever come up with it?”