Why, YES! Lunch is always this entertaining at my house…

1. Rowan pronounced yogurt yorget (pronounced your-get) when she was a toddler; it was just one of those things that stuck and now Bill and I look confusedly at each other when we pronounce it the right way because really? is that how you say it? it doesn’t feel right. Yogurt? Yurgort? Yorgret? Yorget? BLAHLE BLAHLE. We’ve given up and now we all just call it yorget which really confuses other people when we’re out in public and (tangent!) isn’t it FUN to do that? They look at you funny because they know it doesn’t sound right and question whether they’ve said it right or if we’re talking about the same thing and you just stare back at them all nonplussed like WHAT’S THE PROBLEM, DUMBASS? QUIT STARING AND PASS THE YORGET! Anyway Keaton has only ever known it as yorget, because we are assholes and never taught him the correct way to say it which I’m sure will lead to hours and hours of therapy sessions down the road because we didn’t love him enough to teach the proper name for flavored sour milk.

and 2. SHUT UP. Butter noodles are a totally healthy and well-rounded lunch. They are full of grains and minerals and BUTTER. Can’t go wrong.

Scene: Lunch time. Kitchen table.

Rowan: Mom I finished my noodles, can I have a yorget cup?

Me: Sure, good job!

Keaton: I want a yorget cup, too!

Me: You need to eat your {SUPER HEALTHY} noodles all gone, budder.

Keaton: OK, SURE!

I go to the fridge to get Rowan her yogurt and when I bring it to her:

Keaton: I WANT A YORGET CUP!

Me: I heard you, pal, but you haven’t even touched your noodles. No yorget until they’re all gone.

Keaton: But I want yorget NOWwWwWwWwWw.

Me: Keaton. Look at all those noodles in that bowl! It is full and it needs to be empty if you want a yorget cup.

I go to the sink to wash out Rowan’s noodle bowl and hear:

Keaton: I’m done! Da bowl is empty!

And turn around to this:

It's true. Da bowl was empty.

But it wasn't quite what I had in mind.

I mean COME ON. He didn't even try to hide the {NUTRITIOUS} noodle pile under his napkin, or mat or anything! POOR FORM, KID.

The sad part is that I was so impressed with his critical thinking skills I told him if he ate his salami I’d give him the damn yorget. Which he ate 2 bites of and proclaimed “I’m bored! I’m done wiff this.”