Biggest Loser, in which another twist yadda yadda yadda I’m bored

Instead of just a yellow line — how boring is that? — there also is a red line, and the Loser who loses the least will fall below it. He or she will be sent home immediately. The below-the-yellow Losers will once again participate in a silly (and cruel?) physical challenge, and the two last place finishers will be up for elimination.

For the first time ever, TBL is starting to bring this blogger down. Having watched since season one, my enthusiasm for the show is dropping faster than its Nielsen ratings. The product placements are contrived, the number of injuries seems to be increasing, even the trainers aren’t as fun. Those things plus reading season three finalist Kai’s criticisms of the show a few months ago have this blogger feeling blue.

More observations:

Most irritating segment: A “challenge” in which Losers can choose to nosh through a pile of cupcakes in order to win a one-pound advantage at the weigh-in. And if he/she elects to hold on to it, it goes up by an extra pound each week. This blogger needs a spreadsheet to keep track. Adam, the winner, if you can call him that, consumes over 1,300 calories in the process.

Number of “celebrity” guests: One — Chef Curtis Stone. Who is that guy?

Number of bleeped swear words: At least three.

Number of Losers who cry: At least five. Or maybe six. Does tearing up count?

Number of product placements: Two: Subway (“Less than 300 calories… excellent!” and other pro-Subway quotes follow.) and Brita (Bob proudly shows off his pitcher in home refrigerator.

And the weigh-in:

Loser

Starting

Last week

Today

Poundage lost

Percentage lost

Frado

367

337

317

20

5.93%

Ada

258

234

224

10

4.27%

Brendan

362

326

315

11

3.37%

Rick

350

306

297

9

2.94%

Adam

402

356

346

10

2.81%

Aaron

468

431

419

12

2.78%

Patrick

400

366

356

10

2.73%

Jessica

282

261

254

7

2.68%

Lisa

288

267

260

7

2.63%

Elizabeth

244

229

223

6

2.62%

Jesse

369

329

321

8

2.43%

Burgandy

231

218

213

5

2.29%

Mark

421

369

361

8

2.17%

Sophia

272

252

250

2

0.79%

As the Loser who loses the least, Sophia drops below the red line and is sent home immediately.

Jessica through Mark fall below the yellow line. Frado, the week’s Biggest Loser, gets to rescue one contestant, and he picks Jessica. Burgandy is disqualified from the challenge by Dr. H because of tendinitis, which means she’s automatically up for elimination. The rest participate in a completely unnecessary challenge that involves unrolling an enormous carpet down a track.

Elizabeth finishes last and joins Burgandy as a candidate for elimination. And the Losers choose to send home Burgandy.

And the transformations:

Sophia is down to 225, and even her face looks radically different, her jaw is tighter, she’s teaching spin class and the cheerleaders she coaches say they’re really, really proud, even though they are skinny teenagers who snack on chips and sodas.

Burgandy now weighs 180. She exercises with her five children and says that since her experience on the ranch, she is “mentally changed.” She says that we, too, can get up at 5:30 a.m. to work out.

Scoop for next week:

Remember the Loser wanna-bes who didn’t make the cut back in week one? They’ll be trying out to join the competition on the ranch. *Feign shock.* One woman is from Houston. Represent.