Why do some people see it as odd if a woman does something alone? I am the first to put my hand up as an introvert but even so, I find it strange.

As a single woman, I camped alone, drove all over Australia alone, lived alone, walked alone at night, ate at restaurants alone and went to the movies alone. I loved it. Now that I am married, I do most of these things with DH, but even so, still do a fair bit alone.

When I was single, I would get a lot of concern from well-meaning people about my 'strange' habits. And there was always the underlying view that it was a bit pathetic and sad. People still get weirded out now if I stay at a hotel by myself at night for a mini-break. Apparently if you are part of a couple, it is Just. Not. The. Done. Thing.

In fact I know a woman in her mid-thirties who has never spent a night alone. Ever. Not in a hotel, not in her own home. If her partner is away, she makes arrangments for friends or family to come and stay. I find this situation beyond bizzare but no-one else seems to really think so.

So I am reading too much into this? I often wonder if deep down, people think 'little girls' should be sensible and stay at home until a man rescues them and shows them the world from the safety of his care.

I think it depends what you're doing. If it's something that's usually a social thing - like going out to dinner - doing it alone can seem a bit strange. If it's just going-about-your-life stuff, I wouldn't register it as odd at all. If it's seen as a "high-risk" thing to do - like using public transport late at night - it can seem a concern just from a personal safety point of view.

I'd also think it odd if someone couldn't do things on her own, or spend the night on her own, or whatever. That bespeaks a certain dependence to me.

In line with the other thread about women, I do think that society generally raises girls to be sweet and pretty and delicate. Girls are to be protected and adored and rarely get to experience being on their own when young. Perhaps this contributes to some women feeling that they cannot make it on their own.

I think most people would find it strange to stay in a hotel by yourself if you have a partner; whether you're male or female (unless it's a work trip or something).

A blissful night of peace, room service and reading while DH and DS hang out at home versus having DH (and most likely DS) along, with the loud foxtel, stinky toilet, snoring and bed-hogging.... It's a no-brainer!

I'm perfectly happy to do things alone. The only time I felt a bit weird was when I'd gone to NZ with DH for a week and he'd gone home while I stayed on for a conference. The conference didn't start until the next day so I had one day all to myself, which was fine - I went on a bus tour. But that night I had dinner in a restaurant all by myself, and that felt a bit weird and sad. What are you supposed to do while you're waiting for your meal? I read a book but it felt somehow wrong, I was always raised not to read at the table.

I backpacked around the Middle East alone and people were horrified. The thing is, I was doing all the things a couple would do O/S to be safe, or a single person at home, like stay away from the borders with war-torn countries, don't wander down back alleys by yourself, and have a back-up plan if something starts to feel weird or threatening (like go to a hotel lobby or some other busy public place, strike up a convo with a local woman, ask a cop for directions).

I think it often is an idea that women need looking after and that we shouldn't put ourselves at any kind of risk. I feel that it's my life and if I want to take a risk I should be able to without having to endlessly justify myself; also that many "risks" are nothing like as bad as they are perceived to be.

As to the safety angle...well, there's common prudence, which is fine, but there's also this attitude that if you went into an area that is remotely risky and something happens to you, then it's your fault and you deserve no sympathy. Like when Jill Meagher died I heard people saying, "That poor woman...but why on earth was she walking alone at night? That's so silly (or less pleasant words!)" It would never have been put that way if a man had died. Why exactly are women supposed to give up their rights to move freely around their own community just in case someone breaches that right?

your not the only one! I love doing things on my own, it rarely happens now i have 2 toddlers and a husband, and i do miss it. I used to love going to the movies, shopping, lunch at cafes etc on my own, i enjoyed it immensly! I know people also who would never dream of going somewhere alone! I remember skipping school when i was 16 once, i just went into the city, had lunch at a cafe, went to the art gallery and shopped all day, all by myself. i had a lovely day! I personally think its a sign of insecurity if your not comfortable going out by yourself. i love my own company!!

Time alone is bliss!I used to love my night walks and miss them so much now. Was called weird, crazy everytime and got comments of how I shouldnt be out alone after dark.I used to reply back 'well if im crazy that I walk alone, I should be safe, no one wants to kidnap a crazy chick right'usually shut people up

In fact I know a woman in her mid-thirties who has never spent a night alone. Ever. Not in a hotel, not in her own home.

I find that pathetic actually. What is she scared of?

DH works away a lot and I enjoy the peace and quiet! I've spent a few years alone when single and in my 20's.. also weeks on my own when DH is gone with work. I think people would look at me strangely if I couldn't manage to run a household or sleep in a house by myself.

What will she do if something happens to her husband one day? will she just move in with friends until she finds a new man?

So so weird.

Women are their own worst enemy sometimes. They wonder why we aren't taken seriously when a grown woman can't even spend one night on her own!?!

I used to hate travelling for work but who wouldn't enjoy having a room to themselves??

I have always felt unsafe when out at night, so having a boyfriend/husband was always appreciated and I have never known how to have dinner by myself in a restaurant so I have always just had room service.

DH works away a lot and I enjoy the peace and quiet! I've spent a few years alone when single and in my 20's.. also weeks on my own when DH is gone with work. I think people would look at me strangely if I couldn't manage to run a household or sleep in a house by myself.

What will she do if something happens to her husband one day? will she just move in with friends until she finds a new man?

So so weird.

Women are their own worst enemy sometimes. They wonder why we aren't taken seriously when a grown woman can't even spend one night on her own!?!

I have known her since our teens. She will do what she has always done- move in with a new man asap. He won't necessarily be the right man or a good man but to her, the fear of being alone is so horrific that any man will do. I think she has always found me threatening, as my ability to be happy while single and alone messes with her belief that there is nothing more awful than being alone.

In line with the other thread about women, I do think that society generally raises girls to be sweet and pretty and delicate. Girls are to be protected and adored and rarely get to experience being on their own when young. Perhaps this contributes to some women feeling that they cannot make it on their own.

Whereas at 18 my folks happily took my sister overseas and left me home alone which I thought was great.

I happily lived by myself for years before marrying DH. I will take myself out to lunch, coffee, dinner by myself. I did Paris by myself. But then again I was the 4yo who declared I was going tobe a pilot although in the 70's females were air hostesses not pilots. So I never bought into the gender thing. I am also a happy SAHM now, having travelled and had my career.

First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.