That is Sara Goossen in a nutshell. The lady is powerful, energetic, and ready to knock excuses out of the way. She is a bright and compassionate person who sees the potential in people and then helps individuals harness their inner bad ass. This talent is an imperative staple in her personal business model.

October 1, 2012, Sara opened Fit Body Boot Camp- Cheyenne, with 14 clients. Her goal is to change the lives of 5000 of Cheyenne’s citizens by 2017. As of April 2015, she has trained and cultivated a community of 1200 residents who are interested in adopting a healthy life style. That is an average of 400 people a year, getting active and aware in the fair city of Cheyenne and it’s surrounding areas. No small feat for this 5’3″ wrecking ball.

Sara and I got together to discuss her fitness past and her optimistic fitness future; how she came to start FBBC and some of her own trials and tribulations in the fitness process.

Before I jump into the interview, I would like to state that when you are looking for a gym, and a support system to help you change your habits; having a leader like Sara is imperative because she has run the gamut of unhealthy eating and body weight issues. She has children, she knows struggles and excuses. She has taken initiative on her own, in her own life in order to transcend her past hang ups. In turn Sara has turned hardships into valuable insight for those at any point in their fitness journey.

It may be easier for certain people to take her ethic very seriously because she didn’t start out on this lifestyle right after high school or college before having children; when most women’s bodies are still in that youthful metabolism. She wasn’t always healthy. It was a choice that she had to dedicate herself to; which meant a long road of challenges that led to the changes that are evident in her today.

Let’s find out more, shall we?

March/April 2015; back in the game after a 2 month break.

STATS

AGE: 28

HEIGHT: 5’3″

WEIGHT: 145.3 lbs

FAVORITE EXERCISE: RUNNING STAIRS, WORKING THE BACK, AND SQUATS

LEAST FAVORITE EXERCISE: BUILDING CLIMBERS

Breaks are temporary… This lady is out to GET IT DONE!

Let’s talk about your fitness past, eating disorders, all that stuff.

It goes so far back, it’s disturbing… so, okay, 10 years old; my mom told me I needed to stop eating granola bars because they were making me fat and at that point in time I had just finished some book, I can’t remember the title of, and it was talking abou this girl who would throw up, because she was so fat. So…I…followed suit.

Thank God for Children’s Literature, right?

Yeah, I was like, “Well, now I am well informed and I can solve this problem.

(Sara reminences with awkward laughter.)

So, at ten years old that started fourteen years of just roller coaster disordered eating; ranging the spectrum of binging and purging to just starving myself. When I got pregnant with my son, when I was sixteen, I kind of just said “Fuck it. It doesn’t matter if I am skinny; it doesn’t matter if I am fat…I am pregnant. I can eat whatever I want and have no guilt.” I gained 50 pounds when I was pregnant with him, and I lost ten. I lost some weight nursing, but after I stopped nursing him, I continued the disordered eating cycle.

Just picked it up where you left off?

Yep, just picked it up right where I left off. And I knew… I was an athlete in high school, I knew about nutrition but it’s not something that I ever listened to because disordered eating was so much easier than learning how to feed myself. At nineteen I married my now ex-husband, (my daughters’ father) and gained all that “happy weight” I maxed out the scale before we got married, at 197 lbs…. so, I looked like a cow in my wedding dress.

None of this happens over night… it takes time to get to either end of the spectrum. Which one would you prefer to be closer to?

Thank god for girdles….

After that we were trying to get pregnant with Emma, and couldn’t get pregnant… couldn’t get pregnant. We tried for two years, and I finally went to the doctor and asked “what is going on?” I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and the doctor told me that I had to make a lifestyle change, or else…. “you’re going to end up with diabetes; you are more apt to have certain types of cancer, you are just going to get fatter, your thyriod is going to peter out…” All the things that go along with PCOS… “This is your future. You either make a change now or enjoy your future where it is headed.”

At that point I sought help because I knew my disorder was no longer a sustainable way to live life. It wasn’t mentally or emotionally healthy.

So I lost about 20 lbs. and we got pregnant with Emma through a series of fertility treatments. When I was pregnant with Emma I only gained about 20 lbs and then I lost it all right away. At that point they (the doctors) said “Well you are probably not going to be able to have any more children, so don’t worry about it.” And I thought, okay, cool; I am just going to go back to doing the whole weight loss thing, because I still had fifty pounds to go.

So I lost another twenty pounds, and then I got pregnant with my daughter Ileena… BOOM! I remember going to my dads house and saying, “Well… I am pregnant again just when I was gettting my ‘sexy’ back.” My grandma looks at me and says “Well honey, maybe that’s the problem.”

Double edged sword on that one…

Yeah! So I got pregnant and did that whole thing and I only gained fifteen pounds with Ailena , and I lost that all right away. November 2009 I found Body For Life, Bill Phillips, transformation.com ; whom I heard about from my step-mom. So I thought, I am going to try this thing. (Everybody thought I was crazy for starting during the holidays.) It was pretty easy; three days of lifting, three days of cardio, all high intensity intervals. By doing that the next three months I was able to loose the rest of the weight. About half way through that three month process I was like “Ya, know, I want to help other people because I can do this as some one who has struggled their whole life with eating well and taking care of themselves … I can help some one else do this.”

I got my personal training certification.

How long did that take you?

It was about four months and about that time I was working for my dad as his administrative assistant amoung other things. I decided that I would try this training thing before and after work, and see what happens. I did that and it just blew up, so in June 2010, I quit my job working for my dad and I started training full time.

I was doing a lot of one on one training and two boot camp sessions at a local gym. I was making money, doing something I love. I worked there for two years and I left because there were some issues that made it neccessary for me to get out of that environment. I decided, I am just going to start my own place; I left and they came after me with for violating my no-compete/ no-solicitation agreement.

Looking back, I was so mad at the time. I was furious, like how could they do this? How can this stand up? Well, it stood up because I had solicited the people who had signed up with me, but were also their clients. I had to take a year off of training and I went back to working for my dad for a year and within that year I knew I needed to do something. I was miserable.

When you are following a life of passion and suddenly it is taken away; it’s like the wind has been knocked out of your sails. You don’t even feel like a human being. I started looking down in Colorado for places I could move to and open up. I was doing all this during the same time I was being sued and working for my dad; I also had gotten a divorce from my kids father. It was everything that could go wrong, did.

I was at an impass; like shit, what do I do?

I looked down in Boulder and I spent about six months driving back and forth, just looking for a location I could open up. I encountered road block after road block.

By this point I had already talked to the CEO of Fit Body, who has been a long time friend. I told them, I want to do this but I have to wait until this year is up or I am screwed.

Was that part of your Non-compete agreement? Did you have a time limit to wait?

Yes, that was the year. One year to the day, October 1, 2012; we opened up with fourteen clients. I was just so excited to be open and be able to do what I love to do. That’s it… the rest is history. Here we are today; looking for another space, a bigger place… sitting down with the bank and talking about bigger loans.

The beginning bare bones of a fitness fortress in the making.

That’s pretty quick, only three years.

Yeah, less than three years actually.

How do you know the CEO of Fit Body?

The fitness industry is so small, it really is. So if you don’t know every one you soon will if you stay in it long enough. I met him doing a master mind. I was in there with the two founders of Fit Body Boot Camp, Steve Hochman and Bedros Keuilian. I was in Steve’s Master Mind and through that I met Bedros. We had several conversations and talked on the phone several times, emailed back and forth; He called me up one day and said ” What’s it going to take to get you to open a Fit Body? And I told him, “You know what it will take, you know what I am up against right now. It’s going to have to take one hell of a deal and some patience and that is where it’s at.” So he said “Alright, let’s make it happen.”

At this point it was going from licensing to a franchise, so they were looking for people and I just happened to be one of those people.

Do you get together with other gym owners?

I do know a lot of the Fit Body owners simply because we get together quarterly; every three months, usually in San Diego or Chino Hills, California. There is a great community with in Fit Body, even from a corporate structure coming all the way down to the clients. It’s nice that we can just continue to pay it forward. It’s pretty cool, and a very unique situation.

Would you like to talk about your competition stuff?

OH YEAH! Sure! I don’t want to bore you to tears with business.

I first competed in August of 2011, I also ran the Denver half marathon in October 2010, and after that I gave myself permission to never run again. (laughter.) I find it really useless and painful. It turns out I am better suited for lifting heavy things than go fast.

2011 looks good on Sara Gosseen!

Did you do this on your year of sabbatical?

No, it was right before everything blew up in my face. Then I competed in my second figure show August 2013.

2013 looked even better!

Did you win anything?

I did. I placed 5th in the second show, I was pretty excited about that. Granted there were only six figure competitors, so I was 5th, but I was happy to have something to take home, regardless.

My first show I did there were 36 figure competitors, and I think I finished 34th. So I was like, “I think I have improved!”

‘High Knees” are different than heinies… make sure both are in good form!

Were these in Wyoming?

The one in 2011 was in Loveland, Colorado. The Warrior Classic, and the other one was in Wyoming, and that was the Jay Cutler Classic. And that Dude, is a Big Dude. I have a picture of him somewhere.

Not only is Jay Cutler bohemoth, but he makes Sara look like a tiny lil tea cup. Jay Cutler Classic 2013.

He was there?

Yeah, he is huge! He is a moose of a man! My head is as big as his shoulder!

He could pick you up in the palm of his hand!

Honestly I am getting the bug again, to compete. I am trying to weigh out the time commitment that it takes, along with my other obligations to see what it will take… if it’s something I can feasibly do right now while keeping everything else balanced. I do love competing .

If you wait to have your own place, you could put on your own competition, in house competition. Then you won’t have to go too far.

That is one of the most fun things about competition; you get to meet so many interesting people from all over the country. People who are busting their asses just to get super lean for just a minute. It literally lasts a day. You deplete enough to have a six pack for a day, and then you gain 20 pounds the next day because you drink water. It’s crazy.

It would be interesting to time lapse a person going through the build up to competition, and then the 24 hours afterward. Once you get the tanner off, and start drinking water again, it’s like what the hell? You blossom like a flower.

You still eat, you carb load the day of to fill out your muscles because you have depleted to the point that you have taken all the glycogen and striped your body of literally everything. It’s not something you want to do often because it is kind of dangerous, BUT, it’s still fun to push your mental ability and physical barriers. That is big for me, because I love the challenge.

Are you a challenge junkie?

I totally am! I love the personal challenge. Competing against other people is fun, but figure prep is anywhere from 2-5 months.

It’s kind of interesting that you have struggled with disordered eating which is in and of itself sort of an addiction, and pushing your body to a limit and challenging it, but not in a very healthy way. And here you have turned your addiction around to a healthier way of expressing it. Yet, there are still these extremes that you go to.

It totally is. What I think helps me with competing and the lifestyle of body building is the structure that it provides. It’s like a security blanket. You take some one with an eating disorder who has struggled with that their entire life, and you say, “you don’t have to struggle, here is some structure. Have a nice day.” It’s like, “okay, this is safe.”

Then the biggest struggle, is will power to be able to keep on the regamine.

Yeah, it’s like any other fitness goals… as long as you have that dead line… the finish line at the end; it makes it that much easier. It’s not like you have to do this for a lifetime or else… It’s here is your dead line, and then you reset the goal. And that is something that is really, really exciting for me.

Through competing I learned to accept my body, where ever it is; whether I am 120 pounds or 145. I am still strong, I am still beautiful and I am still worthy of love and acceptance and success. That is one of those things that I have accidentally learned through the process. It is a by product.

I know a lot of people who compete who struggle with that mindset. Like if they don’t have a six pack they are done for. They are like “Oh My God, My Life Is OVER!”

It basically boils down to bulemia or dysmorphia. It’s all activated on the same brain wave length, same neurological pathway. It’s been nice to find freedom from that as I have gotten older. To not be stressed out about the numbers, to see yourself and be like “You look good!”

IT’s a good example to your kids, too.

I hope so. Sometimes I wonder, “am I ruining these little people?”

Mommy, Wife, Business Owner and Encourager of the Masses… what can’t this lady do? Photo courtesy of Lacey Dippold Photography

Instead of “You’re the reason mommy has a drinking problem,” it’s more like “You are the reason mommy has an exercise problem.”

That’s funny beacause when I took two months off earlier this year, my kids were like “what is wrong with her?” I did not feel like myself. I felt like I was insane most days; like absolutely bat shit crazy.

You needed to be exerting yourself.

Yeah, I needed that rush of endorphins and I think it was something that I had always taken for granted because I have been doing it for so long, it’s just been part of my life for so long. When I completely took it out, I had no idea the impact it would have on me. Not just physically but spiritually, emotionally and mentally. I got to tell you, the week we started working out again, my husband and I; He was like “Gosh you are so much easier to be around.” And I knew he meant that in the sweetest way possible, instead of being a jerk, and I was like “I know, trust me, it’s easier to be in my head.” I went to the doctor and I asked am I schitzophrenic, what is going on here? And she said “I think you are depressed.” And I just needed exercise.

So tell me about your favorite success story to come out of here.

My favorite one, honestly, is from when I very, very first started. He followed me when I opened Fit Body. His name is Austin, he was 16 when he came to me he was 386 lbs. and he was tall and huge. He knew he had a problem. He was home schooled so he didn’t have a lot of interaction with other kids. The reason he was home schooled was because when he was in school, the other kids were just horrible to him because he was so big and kind of awkward and quiet.

He would come, every single day to Boot Camp. At that point in time, they were 1 1/2 hour sessions, he would show up at 6:00 AM, every day. And even if he couldn’t do it, he would struggle through it.

He asked me, “what do I eat? how do I do it?”

His mom was onboard, but I didn’t see her much. Sometimes she would come and walk while he did Boot Camp. Every now and then she would come talk to me, well when I took the year off, Austin started power lifting and he took his focus off the weight loss. Then he came over to Fit Body when I opened, and he brought his mother with him, and they did it together.

It was just so, so, so cool. He ended up losing 110 lbs by the time he was 19. Then they moved to Oregon. He was such a great, great kid. It was just so cool to see how he was able to influence his mom because it’s usually the parents who influence the kids. He was able to influence his mom after two years of going at it by himself.

Was she also over-weight?

Yes, she was, but such a nice, nice gal. I look back on those two, especially Austin and I think “That kid could have made every excuse in the world because teenagers do, adults do. Teenagers learn from what the adults model.” He just was like “I am tired of this. I am tired of being the ‘fat kid’. I don’t mind being a ‘big kid’, I am 6’3″. But I am tired of being the ‘fat kid'”

The last Halloween he was here, he dressed up as The Hulk; and that involved taking off his shirt, and painting himself green, and walking around with out a shirt on. Two years prior to that you would have never seen him do that. It was so cool to see him blossom from this awkward quiet, video gamer (indoor) kid to this little ball of life and energy, and sass.

It was fun to not only see his journey of weight loss but also to see how he grew as a person. To see him evolve into an adult from a kid that just didn’t want to be fat and made fun of.

Do you stay in contact with him?

I do. I stay more into contact with his mom because he is a young adult now and all over the place.

It would be interesting to see if he takes a career in Fitness from this influence. It seems like people who a great at teaching come from a past of being ostersized.

So, we have touched on this, but obviously Fitness has a positive effect on your homelife.

Oh God, yeah! The kids are like “Mom, go work out, you are driving us crazy.” It is also nice though, because my husband and I can share it together. Every morning Monday through Saturday we go work out together, and then go to work and do our thing. It’s been a good bonding experience for us too. Although it did take us three years for him to come and work out with me. The first time we exercised together, he was having a bad day and we were just friends at the time. I was like “he’s having a bad day, just go lift, and he will be fine.” Well a half hour in, he is dry heaving on himself, and I was like ” I thought you were in shape?” Well, after that he didn’t come back to work out with me for three years. And he comes to boot camp, and he makes it through the whole thing, and after that he said “I am going to have to wait until you are ‘deconditioned’ a little before we can work out together.”

He took the oppertunity while I took two months off to “even the playing field.”

Since then it has been nice, in the last couple of months to have that morning time with my husband because we have five kids… we need that time together. It’s nice to have that time and cheer each other on.

What are some of your future goals?

Really my mission is just to help people and it always has been. I am in the business of changing lives and if I am not changing lives, then I am doing something wrong.

Watch out folks….

YOU RUINED MY LIFE THROUGH EXERCISE!

Ha, ha! Oh man, if some one said that to me, I would have to reevalute everything. I really do just want to leave an impact on this world. And, Cheyenne… God Bless it, and all of it’s citizens; (but Cheyenne) is a FAT city. Overweight, unhealthy; spiritually, mentally and physically. People are over worked and under paid, or over worked and over paid. They have little or no time for their families , no time for themselves; no time to do anything. So we have people spinning their wheels, but for what? At the end of the day if you don’t have your health, you have nothing left. I don’t want to out live my children. I see obese kids around and I want to slap their parents. I don’t want to beat the kids, but I want to slap the parents. It makes me so mad. But then I look at it, and you have to change the lives of the parents before you can change the lives of the children. At the end of the day, it is our job as adults to make those responsible decisions. It isn’t easy, but it is our responsiblity.

It’s in my heart to change the health of this community, if not the entire community of Wyoming, but that’s a long way off down the road. I want to continue to make a difference in peoples health and in their lives.

Thirty minutes of exercise might not seem like much, but it can change how a wife treats her husband. She is in a better mood, she feels better about herself, she feels more attractive… she actually wants to be with her husband instead of saying ” I don’t see what you see, at all.”

It changes how a mother treats her children because she has more energy, she will want to take them to the park, or go hiking and do stuff. Or maybe she is just in a better mood and doesn’t want to paddle their butts just for being little people.

It is just fitness, it is just a work out… but it can change EVERYTHING. I have seen it with myself. I saw it when I started my journey years ago and I still see it today. If I don’t work out, I need to work out because I start feeling ‘cagey’ inside. Anxious.

What has your biggest triumph been in your personal fitness journey?

I think just staying the course. Every day is a new day. I can’t say one event has been a real defining moment in my health and fitness journey. I think it just staying course with the lifestyle. I mean sometimes I fall off, just like anyone. I go on a little cookie diet, when I feel stressed, and then I gain eight pounds and then I have to lose it again. At the end of the day just knowing that I am doing what I need to be doing is just great. But when I am not doing that I can tell a difference. So for me, it’s just committing to the lifestyle.

Is there anything you would want to change?

No. Not really because I believe even the hard stuff is lessons. And I think I am far more grateful now toward some of the hardships that I went through. When you look back at it, it just gives you an oppertunity to learn about yourself; to learn about others and the way the world works. Hardships are often self inflicted. So if anything it’s just learning about who I am and who I want to be and who I do not want to be. It’s just about growing up.

Would you like to give any tips or inspiration?

It’s just about consistency. You have to pick and plan and be consistent. It doesn’t matter what your plan is, as long as it has some good foundation of physical health, mental health and spiritual health. Even if it’s CrossFit or lifting or body building or boot camp; whatever it is, I think it’s just about picking something that works for you and stick with it. I know Boot Camp isn’t for everyone. I wish it was. At the end of the day finding something that works and sticking with it long enough to get results. So many people just go about their life by starting a new program every two weeks, saying “But I am just not getting results.” and I am like “Dude, it’s only been two weeks. Do you know how long it took me to lose 70 pounds?”

How long did it take you?

Beginning to end it took three years. Granted I got pregnant twice in between, but it took me three years to lose that 70 pounds. It’s not going to happen over night.

After spending all this time taking other peoples measurements; when do people, on average see a difference for themselves and accept that change is occurring?

Typically eight weeks, especially for women. I call it an 8 Week Miracle. Literally nothing on the scale can change and inches may not change, but may be your clothes fit differently. For whatever reason the inches may not change, your body fat may not change, and then one day you wake up and somewhere between the bedroom and the bathroom, you realize you lost your ass. It’s like it’s just fallen off somwhere and you hop on the scale and you are down ten pounds from the night before. And you will be like “what the hell? My scale must be broken.”

So you call in a spouse or a loved one and you have them hop on the scale and it says what it always says to them, and you hop back on there and it says the same thing, “you are down 10 lbs.”

You have to trust the process, long enough. Not just “half commit.”

“Oh I am just gonna work out for eight weeks and hope that everything is going to happen. You have to have a plan. Have a plan of attack and exicute it flawlessly. Even if you have one bad day, okay, perfect; get back on the band wagon, but don’t let that one bad day or one bad meal derail you for the next six months.

So I think that is the key. Consistency. You have to be consistent, no matter what. And that goes with anything; if it’s fitness related, or business related, or if you want better relationships. What ever it is, BE CONSISTENT! STICK WITH YOUR PLAN! Things WILL change.

In summery; Knowledge, is the awareness that all action has a reaction, and Wisdom, is using that awareness to your advantage whilst utilizing all available resources.

Fit Body Boot Camp works because of the significant insight that the program lends through collaborative Wisdom and Experience.

Fit Body Boot Camp is calling out more of Cheyenne to get involved in their fitness; and during the month of May we are taking extra efforts to expose residents to the opportunity. If you have been following this blog and you are tempted to try it; COME ON DOWN! Let them know you read this blog and that it has helped you to take the first step in health and wellness; or if you are new to town and looking for a fitness community and this seems up your alley, come take a test drive.

If this article interests you and you would like to read more, check out these related blogs. And as always I appreciate “likes”, comments, suggestions and subscribers; so please feel free to interact. And remember kids, Fitness is great, but Burpees SUCK!

If you want to meet a woman who gets right down to business, look no further than Fit Body Boot Camp Trainer, Amber Lemberger. We met up at the gym on a lazy Sunday afternoon to discuss her roles at boot camp, and give her clients a view of her journey.

Amber has a sense of poise about her. She is friendly and professional; dressed in shorts and a white running jacket. Hanging from her ears were some of the most sparktacular earrings I have ever seen. They matched nicely with her beautiful wedding ring.

Amber looks like a fitness instructor but not just any fitness instructor; a Classy Fitness Instructor. Her whole aesthetic appears carefree and yet, intentionally manicured. I imagine her at her primary employment at a dentists office… face half covered in a mask…wearing scrubs or lab coats all day. I imagine her wearing this during the interview about fitness, and the juxtaposition of it makes chuckle on the inside.

This interview basically starts before it begins. Amber is excited to talk, and has read my previous interviews, so we jump right in and I hit the record button.

ME: So I am basically doing these articles to allow people to get a good idea of what’s going on here (at FBBC), to make it less intimidating.

AMBER: One of the biggest things I think , is that people think we are perfect. That we have had no problems or that everything has come easy to us, and, I am like “no”… it’s definitely far from that. I think that is the most important thing for people to see. We all struggle, we all came from somewhere. ”

Amber was born and raised in Independence, Iowa; and was involved in basketball, volleyball, and tennis through out high school. She takes a minute to reflect, “Basketball was by far my favorite.”

Amber quit sports when she attended Kirkwood Community College in Cedar Rapids, Iowa as she pursued education in Dental Assistance.

AMBER: I worked out here and there when I had time when I was at college, and then I graduated college and moved here (Cheyenne) in 2005. I occasionally worked out when I wanted to, nothing super intense or crazy. I didn’t eat the greatest, I still ate out and all that good stuff.”

In 2011, Amber was working at Smart Sports, another fitness center in Cheyenne. A few of her comrades were encouraging her to compete in a fitness competition. She decided to jump on board and change her lifestyle, in order to see how well it would go.

August of 2011, Amber enters the Warrior Classic after just 16 weeks of training involving a super intense eating and exercise regime. She lost approximately one pound a week with the help of a personal trainer and placed 4th in her category. Still in the competitive mood and under peer pressure, a year later, Amber returned to the 2012 Warrior Classic and received 9th in her class.

August 2011 Warrior Classic 4th place Winner, Amber Lemberger.Amber in 2012, 9th place in her division at the Warrior Classic.

AMBER: No sweets, no bread, no fruit. Basic meat and vegetables and complex carbs; the entire time. I also Carb Cycled the entire time. Then I was on very low, restricted carbs the last two weeks. Toward the end you cut water. I took fourth, it was exciting. It’s very intimidating getting on that stage for the first time. I was so nervous that I was shaking…but I had just busted my ass for 16 weeks, so I am just gonna get up there and strut my stuff… I am gonna give it all I got!

After I competed, is where I struggled; it’s tough. You have seen what your body can do, but you also have to be able to have a maintainable body. A figure body is not maintainable, it’s not healthy. At that point it’s not maintainable unless you want to be a raging bitch every day for the rest of your life.

(Amber chuckles, knowing full well what she is talking about.)

You are literally restricting yourself of everything, you get one cheat meal a week. A MEAL. That’s it. I had sweet potato pancakes every Sunday as my cheat meal, and they were fantastic! The last five weeks I didn’t get a cheat meal at all. (She pauses) It’s hard, you really have to accept your body the way it is and be okay with that. That was really hard for me. I struggled for a long time.

ME: It must be hard to put yourself in that position; to be judged by people and to purposefully put yourself in the situation where you are being compared to the person next to you.

AMBER : It’s hard because so and so up there may not be natural, using steroids or other things. Now, I personally, can not do those things to myself, that’s not something I wanted to do; so I had to be okay getting on stage next to somebody knowing that they aren’t natural. You have to know down in your heart, “You know what, this is me, and I look damn good for training for 16 weeks even if I don’t get first place.”

It’s definitely hard, and they (the judges) are really critical of you. They told me “You need to trim down your legs.” I was on the stair mill 50 minutes a day for WEEKS, and they still told me I had to lean them down, more. I was just like Ugh (exasperated sigh).

ME: It must be hard to be judged like that after pushing your body as far as it would go, and have to them tell you “Eh it’s still not good enough.”

AMBER: Yeah, for sure. One of the things that was hardest for me is I just don’t have a big upper body. So that effected my points, too. The experience alone, and saying that I have done it was…. I just was totally down with that. All of it. The tan, having your suit glued to your butt. It’s something you will never know, unless you do it. I mean standing nude in a cold tent, being sprayed with three coats of tan. You have to bend over, and spread your legs. At that point you’re just like “who cares, I trained way too long to not be here and sticking my butt in your face.”

The whole experience, gives you a high for the whole day. You can do anything on the day of a show, because you know “I’m almost done.”

It’s been a ride since 2011. A lot of ups and downs.

June 2011, before competing in the Warrior Classic.

Amber moved right in to talking about Fit Body Boot Camp.

AMBER: I knew owner Sara (Goossen) from competition and in September 2013, I thought, “I am going to give Boot Camp a go.” I wanted something different. I don’t want to spend two hours in the gym, a day. I don’t have time for it.

I came in and I heard Sara was looking for a trainer and I love helping people. I am a dental assistant during the day and it’s a very helpful profession. It’s very gratifying. You get to see so many good things throughout the day, you also see some pretty bad things but you get to make people feel good about themselves. And that’s what I love. So I met with Sara, and she said “You know, I never would have thought that this was something you would have wanted to do.” So I started coming in, and working with her a bit and then I started training. And I love it! I love helping people. I love being here.

My training style is a little different. When I am in here, I am serious. When I work out I have bitch face. When I am here, I am focused on working out and getting people where they need to be. I mean, there is laughter and joking, but it’s more “We are here to get this done.” I am here to push you, and if that means sometimes it’s tough love, then it’s tough love, ya know? I love seeing people succeed. I love seeing people do something that they couldn’t do before.

I try to put the heavier weights in peoples hands, I love pushing people to the extreme because that is what they want, and they are so much happier when they surprise themselves.

The best compliment is when some tells me that I helped push them. We all need to be pushed, even me. We have to push each other. There are days when I just want to shut off the alarm and not show up, and I have to push myself.

I was lifting alone at 4:30 in the morning, and then Amanda McDaniel started lifting with me, and it made all the difference. Having some one show up that early, it’s like “Hey, I am accountable to you.”

I am very motivated, I don’t need anyone else to motivate me to get here; but when I am working out, it’s good to have that push or to have some one next to me. Like, “oh she is faster than me.”

ME: It seems that is one of the things that makes Boot Camp so successful, it includes everything you need to jump in there and get things done. It takes care of the awkwardness.

AMBER: Oh yeah! Everyone here is so helpful. And it doesn’t ever feel like Bobby Jo is better than everyone else. If some one is struggling, you show them or help them. If you’re new, I don’t think anyone has ever felt secluded. We are all, always trying to help them jump in; which can be hard for a trainer because we are always watching the time and keeping track of the sets that you have done. You are trying to watch form, and help the new people learn what they are doing. Sometimes it’s difficult; there is just so much going on at once. Sometimes people may not understand how much we have going on in our minds in one 30 minute training session.

ME: Not to mention watching 20 people, making sure they don’t injure themselves.

AMBER: Yeah, you can’t always see everyone. Sometimes people think they can hide that they are nauseas or light headed, and they hide it pretty well until they can’t. And I am like “you have been feeling like this for the last 10 minutes? Why didn’t you say something?” But sometimes they are afraid to say anything, but that’s the hard part, knowing if they are “okay”. Is their form okay? (As a Trainer) You want to give your attention to everyone but sometimes it’s hard.

What is nice, is that people that have been here for a while will jump in and be like “Hey this is how you do this.” And that is really helpful.

I have regulars in my class, and it’s nice because I get to know them and build lasting friendships. Knowing that they can confide in you and that you can share your own stories with them is great. Like I said before, sometimes people don’t think that you struggle as a trainer. But they do, they have. I can attest to that on a daily basis. I mean, I have had body issues my whole life. It’s nice to be able to share that with clients because they think that it’s just them; but no, I’ve been there.

ME: It’s great that these friendships are built on encouragement instead of falsehoods or just blowing smoke up each other’s ass.

AMBER: It is nice. It is nice to know that people can come to us. I like that. These are true friendships. I had a girl message me today, and I message her every morning to come work out, because she has a hard time getting up. So at 3:45 every morning I send her a text, “Hey Boot Camp Today!” Anyway, she texted me and said, “sorry to bother you on a Sunday.” And you know, it doesn’t bother me. I want them to know that they can call me on Sunday, it isn’t a big deal and I want to be able to help whenever I can.

It doesn’t matter what day of the week it is; we all need some one to confide in, and that is what friends are for.

ME: What strides do you feel you have made through boot camp?

AMBER: I think it has made me accept myself more. A. Because I find I am happier with myself, I have gotten better results with the way I feel I look better than I did when I was just doing my own thing with the lifting and cardio. I am probably the happiest with myself that I have ever been just because I feel stronger. I feel like I am in the best shape I’ve ever been in; cardio wise and everything. Boot camp has definitely made me feel better about myself. I think it’s all the encouragement and the fact that you GET RESULTS with what you are doing. 90% of it is diet. If you watch what you are eating and come to class every day, you are going to get results in less than an hour a day.

It’s made me realize more isn’t always better. Killing yourself in the gym isn’t always better. To even go and do 20 minutes on a stationary machine… I just can’t do it any more. I just don’t want to do it. It’s like the most dreaded 20 minutes of my life!

ME: What do you feel, on your fitness journey, that your biggest struggle has been?

AMBER: Self Image for sure. I am the most critical of myself. I preach to people, like, “Don’t weight yourself.” “Don’t stress about the numbers.” But I am probably one of the worst critics in the past of weighing myself entirely too much. I would pick myself apart on a day to day basis, especially after competing.

ME: So it never manifest, for you, as an eating disorder?

AMBER: I have never “not eaten” or thrown up. I would say I had body dysmorphia, and a self image issue but it never been to a point of not eating or throwing up. I have to eat every two hours, I feel like I could kill someone… so if I am not eating every couple of hours then I am not doing okay.

Amber 2015, looking great and well balanced.Check out the curves and definition in her back!

ME: Do you feel like Boot Camp has been beneficial to your relationship?

AMBER: Yes, I do! It’s made me feel better about myself. My husband is very supportive of everything I do and he is very loving . He always tells me he loves me and that I am beautiful, but he said it’s hard on him when I am hard on myself. He would say “My wife is wonderful, my wife is beautiful…but she is saying other”. It was really hard on him. But now I am happier with how I look and that makes it easier on him. He would be giving me these compliments and I would be “uh-huh, sure, okay.” In one ear and out the other. When you start feeling better about yourself it makes life so much easier.

Don’t get me wrong, I still have days just like every body else. We all have our days where we just don’t feel like ourselves.

Boot Camp looks good on Amber, wouldn’t you say?

Amber and I chatted a bit longer off the record, and I can honestly say that she is an amazing and resilient spirit. Her positivity toward helping others is quite inspiring and I wish her the best with her future endeavors, namely, of the baby making variety.

Having a compatible trainer can help make or break your physical fitness routine. At Fit Body Boot Camp, the trainers are all very personable and passionate about helping others succeed at their fitness goals and living a life style of health. Each of them is willing to assist where ever necessary in order to lead by example.

It’s crazy to think we are all weightless beings dragging around meat suits. Right?

Like here we are just roaming about superficially judging ourselves and others for their bodies.

And sure, we all have our reasons.

The other day, I posted this status to my Facebook, “How many of you are willing to admit you are fatist, even though you are ashamedly aware of it?”

I got five “likes” and one very sincere response.

The sincere response was from a friend of mine who lives in the mountains. She lives an active lifestyle just out of pure necessity. Here was her very honest, and candid response through our dialog.

” I suppose the day I lose all my excess fat maybe I’ll have a leg to stand on… Ha. ”

To which I responded, ” I think it is sort of like racism, we ignore it until it is in our face. There are certain movements that are “body acceptance and appreciation” oriented and yet media is saturated by the idyllic bodies of 18 year olds. Funny that other cultures find obesity to be beautiful and a sign of wealth and virility; where as our society is pretty much disgusted by people who are not height/weight proportionate, despite the reasons, like hypothyroid, diabetes, and metabolic issues. Being “heavy” in this society is seen as a symptom of sickness, which plays in the mental health of the person with the weight. It is a lot of psychological fuckery.”

And here is where she really shares her observations not only of other humans, but of herself.

“Well overweight and obese are different to me. Overweight is pretty normal. I’m overweight, probably always will be. Obese makes me wonder how that happened. I wonder if it’s a psychical or physiological disorder. Or a mental disorder? Or laziness? Or were they raised to believe that their eating habits were normal and just fine, when clearly they are not?
I judge very fat and obese people, but only in one circumstance, really. Even though it’s only one circumstance, it’s not ok for me to judge. But I do, and here it is:
Someone walks in the door of the restaurant I am waiting tables at. A very large person. So large, perhaps, that their bottom hangs off either side of the chair struggling to withstand the weight of this person. This person orders a Coke from me, their friendly waitress. Strike 1. What are you doing? You’re making a terrible choice. “Of course!” I say with as much enthusiasm as a fucking Coke commercial. Maybe they’ve ordered a Diet. Even worse. Ouch.
You’re killing yourself. Can’t you see? I come back a few minutes later with a syrupy, dark, fizzy, delicious sodapop and place it down in front of the menu they are perusing. “Do you know what you’d like for lunch today?” I ask, knowing along which lines the answer will be.
“Yes,” this person says, “I’ll have the Bleu cheese burger and onion rings.”
Now, this Bleu cheese burger is a monstrous burger topped with Bleu cheese, bacon, onions and mushrooms. It’s delicious- and probably a thousand shitty calories with those damn delicious onion rings. See, I find myself in judgement mode for just a second here. “You’re making bad choices!!!!!!” Is what I want to yell! But of course, maybe that’s not it. Maybe this person doesn’t know why this food is no good. Plenty of places in America think that a burger is a good wholesome meal. “EAT MORE BEEF” was an actual billboard I used to drive by in Missouri when I lived there. Like somehow it’s the sweet nectar of life. Or maybe, this person struggles with their weight and decided that for one day, they were going to eat exactly what they pleased without guilt. Who am I to ruin that experience for them?
Who the fuck knows why this person is fat or if they care if they’re fat. But to answer your question, yes. I suppose I am a fatist, if that one moment when a grossly oversized and overcaloried meal is ordered out of the mouth of a fat person and I have a moment of weakness in which I forget to only love and never judge, for I have never walked in their shoes There. I admit it.”

This is a great example of the thought process we all go through in any sort of judgment that we have toward anyone; even ourselves.

We see what we see, how we see it. And we know what we know, because we learned it or heard it. Ideas and ideals can stick like glue, especially if those impressions were made in our youth.

Impressed with her answer I sent her this ; “thank you for your honesty, it’s really refreshing to hear someone be introspective about it… because it is just that one second, ya know? But just as quick as it happens we try to distract ourselves from that moment. I think you are averaged sized, not overweight. You are height weight porportionate… you have curves but gentle ones. Unless you are trying to look like a weight lifter or a body builder, you look totally appropriate for you.”

The comment was removed, but she later noted how it took her longer to write the description of her feelings and think about it, than it her initial judgments.

Let’s break this down a little…

We all judge, even though we don’t want or mean to.

We are all hypercritical of ourselves. Slightly more lenient on those we don’t despise.

Despite our natural inclination toward or against competitive nature, we are immersed in a subconsciously competitive world. A world which has no clear definition in its causation toward it’s competition; where we no longer forage for food or kill out of necessity.

We are inundated with images of some one else’s ideals for perfection, and we’ve bought what we’ve been sold.

All of this has been a long time coming.

If we choose to dig deeper into our individual reasons for fatism, we will see our own trauma.

Sure, it would be nice to have the ideal body of a perky and pert 18 year old posing on the cover of Rolling Stone or Fitness; but let us be real. We All don’t have high fashion photographers and filters; trainers, and eating disorders.

Some of us just have stress and hormonal issues, some of us are dealing with loss; self control and dysmorphia . Some of us never knew what it was to be thin, other are dealing with guilt. Some of us have had children, or sympathy weight… Our insides are tired and worn, our outsides give clues to the story.

Our meat suits define us in some way. They physically relate our internal states of being. How we feel inside is reflected back to our external perception in every conceivable way.

When a person looks like they have given up; there is a strong chance they probably have… but this place is no place for us to judge the whys and how. It is our job to see the weightless spirit that exists within that skin, and to encourage it to keep going.

It is our job to have the curiosity enough to ask and assist, especially in a place where every one is trying to make an effort. Be it the gym; the track, the trail, or just in general life.

I am sure this is just the “tip of the iceberg” in future posts looking at the same issue.

I encourage you to look at your own “fatist” mentalities. Really examine them and ask yourself their source. Spend longer than a few seconds on this daunting task. Ask yourself how it relates to your own body image and how you treat (or mistreat yourself.)

And next time you feel the judgment bug bite your ass, take a moment to ask where it’s roots really lie, and what you can do to confront it with compassion.

We are all hauling around meat suits as malleable as our mind and spirit.