Every Friday in July we are tapping a cask from our pals
at Lost Nation Brewing. This first one in the series is their
wonderful Gose dry hopped with Galaxy hops. Tapping
happens at 5 oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;clock sharp.

Yâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;all are coming to our fine state for the Brew Fest weekend so.....we are stacking our
lines for YOU. All 22 beer lines will feature the finest beers, plucked from our arsenal and
continuously rotating all weekend. Stop in on the way in. Stop in on the way out. Or stop in
and never leave. We have the beer you want. Draught list forthcoming- check facebook.

us for Peak
n us forJoin
Peak
Experiences
Experiences
SUMMER/FALL 2013 SEASON

n Tuesday, Sen. Patrick Leahy brought the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee to
the University of Vermont for a hearing on net neutrality. A bill he's cosponsoring
would forbid internet service providers — like Comcast, FairPoint and Burlington
Telecom — from offering so-called “fast lanes,” which allow companies to pay a premium
price to reach customers more quickly. These four were among the speakers.

WHAT MULTIPLIES
BENEATH

The shrimp-like
spiny water flea
found last week
in the Glens Falls
Feeder Canal
now threatens
Vermont. It would
be Lake Champlain’s
50th aquatic
invasive. Ugh.

SMOKE OUT

You can’t smoke in a
car with kids under
age 8 — or in hotels
— now that a new
state law has gone
into effect. What’s
next — Church
Street? Looks like it.

BEDBUG BITE

The state is paying
a Rutland family
$450,000 for the
mistake of an
exterminator, who
used a banned
chemical to rid their
home of bedbugs.
At least someone’s
sleeping easier.

SHARP SHOOTERS

Burlington officials
are seriously
considering public
disposal sites
for hypodermic
needles because
people are tossing
them in the drains
and trash. Gross.

That’s how many beds
there are in the Vermont
Psychiatric Care Hospital in Berlin,
which opened Tuesday. The facility
partially replaces the 54-bed Vermont
State Hospital in Waterbury, which
Tropical Storm Irene destroyed in 2011.

TOPFIVE

MOST POPULAR ITEMS ON SEVENDAYSVT.COM

1. “Yes, a Zebra Roams in Vermont” by Alicia
Freese. We still haven’t found Champ, but
there’s a zebra in the hills of Reading.
2. “Eco-Warrior Paul Watson Brings Sea
Shepherds to Vermont” by Alicia Freese.
More than 100 members of the Sea Shepherd
Conservation Society traveled to Vermont to
discuss activism on the high seas.
3. “Big Blues: Vermont Braces for a Post-IBM
World” by Paul Heintz. IBM is reportedly
nearing a deal to sell its chip-making
division, and the state is bracing for the
potential job losses.
4. “Growler Garage to Open in South
Burlington” by Hannah Palmer Egan. The
new store promises 20 draft lines as well as
rare bottles and cans when it opens. We’re
surprised people aren’t already lined up.
5. “A Feline Toilet-Training Tutorial” by
Courtney Copp. If you’ve ever wanted to
teach your cat to use the pot, this
illustrated guide will help.

tweet of
the week:
@NWSBurlington
#BTV at 90f as of 2pm. First
time this hot since Sept 11, 2013.
Humid conditions make it feel
more like 95. Keep cool. #vtwx
FOLLOW US ON TWITTER @SEVEN_DAYS
OUR TWEEPLE: SEVENDAYSVT.COM/TWITTER

07.02.14-07.09.14

Rule No 19

Champlain.edu/OnlineLearning
1/28/14 2:01 PM

WEEK IN REVIEW 5

Sharpen your skill set with more than 60 online
undergraduate and graduate programs and certificates.

SEVEN DAYS

TO BE CUTTING EDGE,
YOU NEED TO STAY SHARP.

4h-champcoll-cps012914.indd 1

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

NET NEUTRALITY

COMPILED BY MATTHEW ROY & ANDREA SUOZZO • DRAWN BY MATT MORRIS

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Seven Days is published by Da Capo Publishing Inc.
every Wednesday. It is distributed free of charge
in Greater Burlington, Middlebury, Montpelier,
Stowe, the Mad River Valley, Rutland, St. Albans, St.
Johnsbury, White River Junction and Plattsburgh.
Seven Days is printed at Upper Valley Press in North Haverhill, N.H
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Please call 802.864.5684 with your credit card, or mail your check
or money order to “Subscriptions” at the address below.
Seven Days shall not be held liable
to any advertiser for any loss that
results from the incorrect publication
of its advertisement. If a mistake is
ours, and the advertising purpose
has been rendered valueless,
Seven Days may cancel the
charges for the advertisement, or
a portion thereof as deemed reasonable by the publisher.
Seven Days reserves the right to refuse any advertising,
including inserts, at the discretion of the publishers.

I enjoyed reading the article about Peter
Schumann, founder and artistic director
of Bread and Puppet Theater [“Living Art,”
June 18]. The writer made an error when
referring to Silesia as a town. Silesia is a
region of Poland.

Hampshire’s economy over the years. New
Hampshire Republicans understand that
their prosperity blossoms when pro-business Republicans are in office in Concord,
and progressive high-tax, high-regulation,
high-mandate majorities rule in Montpelier.
John McClaughry

KIRBY

Katherine Bielawa Stamper

WILLISTON

INFORMATIVE PIECE

Very nice article [“Living Art,” June 18].
I have read a lot about Bread and Puppet
over the years but actually learned something new reading your piece. Good portrayal of Schumann, too.
Warren Schultz

NEW YORK, N.Y.

NOT NEW HAMPSHIRE!

[Re “Tim Newcomb,” June 11]: Your graphically talented but substantively challenged
cartoonist Tim Newcomb offered up a
cartoon of anguished Republican elephants,
purporting to explain that their biggest base
of support was located in … New Hampshire!
Having lived within sight of New
Hampshire for 50 years, please allow me
to explain to your Left Coast readership
that New Hampshire Republicans are a
strong base of support — not for Vermont’s
Republicans but for Vermont’s Democrats.
That’s because Democratic policies in
Vermont have done wonders for New

TIM NEWCOMB

24/7 LAKE THREAT

[Re “Oil and Water: Trains Hauling More
Crude Along Lake Champlain,” June 18]:
Sure, there is a debacle-in-waiting every
time crude oil is railroaded near Lake
Champlain. But of far greater danger — 24
hours a day, seven days a week — is the ongoing destruction of the natural landscape of
the lake’s watershed. Every time a woodlot
— much less a whole forest — is leveled for
development and more impervious surface
is created, the lake suffers more pollution.
No wonder algae blooms are a near-constant
threat to water quality and fish and wildlife.
Alan C. Gregory

WILLISTON

‘BOMB TRAIN’ SOLUTION

The wicked truth is the natural gas liquids
— the explosive part — can be removed
from Bakken crude before it gets shipped
[“Oil and Water: Trains Hauling More
Crude Along Lake Champlain,” June 18].
This is standard practice at Texas’ Eagle
Ford shale formation, due to pipeline
pressure limitations. You need a stabilizer

wEEk iN rEViEw

They are 99 percent free almost all
the time. Hordes of bicyclists mowing
down geriatric pedestrians? Not a valid
argument. Expect people to act in a responsible and civil manner and, strangely
enough, most do! If they don’t, then take
appropriate action.
I see both groups already sharing the
sidewalk every day on North Avenue.
I grew up in a much larger city where it
worked because people — not laws — made
it work. Most people can do this. It’s just
that simple. Let’s fix real problems.
tony Gallucci

burlingTOn

PurrFEct PAPEr

I had just come in the door of my
house, put down the recent Animal
Issue of Seven Days, and here is what
happened. As you can see, Jasper the
Cat approves.
robyn madison
danbY

— roughly a billion dollars, or about the
cost of rebuilding Lac Mégantic in Québec,
where a so-called “bomb train” exploded a
year ago.
Liston tatum

OrleanS

BikE PAth LimitAtioNS

SiDEwALk workS

corrEctioN

A June 18 story, “Switchback to
the Future,” incorrectly stated that
an extra pale ale was made with
Vermont hops. In fact, a pilot batch
of the brew used local hops, but the
full release does not.

HEAR EVERY WORD.
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families restore the quality to living.
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New patients welcome!
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802.316.4602

Intelligence, Designed
Sally’s Smart Orange Ginger
Almonds are good for
you and great tasting.
Reg: $6.99 NOW: $3.99.
That’s nuts!

Twin Maple Hudson Red is a
funky favorite. Stinky and made
from raw cow’s milk,
this rich, creamy cheese will
pair well with a sweet
Riesling or a Belgian Ale.
Reg: $29.99/lb NOW: $4.99/lb!

Tour de France Tasting
Join us Saturday, 7/5, as we
kick off the race with a tour
of our own. We’ll be tasting
the wines of some our
favorite regions throughout
France from 1-5pm.
It’s gonna be dope.

HAVE A SAFE AND HAPPY
JULY 4TH!

Say Something!
Seven Days wants to publish
your rants and raves.
Your feedback must...
• be 250 words or fewer;
• respond to Seven Days content;
• include your full name, town and
a daytime phone number.

In
Feedback
[“Bike-Unfriendly
Burlington,” June 18], Richard Watts
concludes, “great cities deserve great bike
infrastructures.” His comments and concerns are valid, but I differ in opinion on
that one comment. We have an infrastructure in most all of Burlington: It’s called a
sidewalk.

burlingTOn

We find the deals,
you get the savings

SEVEN DAYS

WinOOSki

Lily Fedorko

Live the High Life
Pay a Low Price

07.02.14-07.09.14

Stephanie Becker

Let me start out by explaining that I’m agnostic and don’t follow any religion. I am,
however, a religion major at the University
of Vermont. Your paper posted a highly
offensive comic regarding GMOs [“Tim
Newcomb,” June 18]. The tagline being
“G(MO)HAD,” as in Jihad. It portrayed those
against GMO labeling as Islamic extremists.
I’d like all Seven Days readers to understand that a jihad is not related to terrorism
in any way. Someone’s jihad is that one’s
struggle to fulfill one’s religious purpose.
There have been Twitter campaigns in an
effort to take back the term #myjihad.
It is completely unacceptable to me for
anyone to use a religious group to portray
something considered negative in the
public view in the way that those against
GMO labeling are in Vermont. I am appalled that anyone would think that this
OK. It’s profiling and ignorant.

this moment

SEVENDAYSVt.com

I am writing in response to the individual
who feels that the bike path is a suitable alternative to providing consistent bike lanes
in Burlington, specifically in the New North
End [Feedback, “Take the Bike Path,” June
18]. As a former year-round bike commuter,
it is my opinion that the bike path should
be for recreation only and is not appropriate for commuters or road bikers. First, it is
very rarely a direct route to where you are
going, therefore increasing your commute.
Second, it is unsafe to ride your bicycle at
high speeds on the bike path. Forcing all
bikers onto the bike path is dangerous for
the recreational bikers, joggers and walkers who also use it. For these reasons, we
need consistent bike lanes throughout the
Burlington area, as well as cyclists who are
following the rules of the road.

iNSuLtiNG to iSLAm

Don’t miss

contents
JULY 02-09, 2014 VOL.19 NO.44

NEWS
14

On the Warpath
Against the ‘Green
Mountain Mafia’

20

16

Burlington’s
Affordability
Crisis
BY MATTHEW ROY &
THEO ELLSWORTH

27

Ethan Allen

36

BY MARGOT HARRISON & KAZ

Fun Home!
The Musical!

40

Eater of Worlds
BY ALICE LEVITT & JON CHAD

Eleri Mai Harris hails from
Hobart, Tasmania, and is a journalist, cartoonist and associate
editor of online nonfiction comics
hub the Nib. A recent graduate
of the CCS’s MFA program, Harris
lives in White River Junction with
her partner Tom and a set of plastic dinosaurs. elerimai.com

Last Seven STATS

BY ANDREA SOUZZO
& MATT MORRIS

Kaz has written for “SpongeBob SquarePants” and Disney’s
“Phineas and Ferb.” He’s been
drawing his “Underworld” comic
strip since 1991, and you can
now read it every week in this
paper. He lives in Hollywood, Calif.
kazunderworld.com

FEATURES

Alison Bechdel is the author of
the graphic memoirs Fun Home: A
Family Tragicomic and Are You My
Mother? A Comic Drama. For 25
years, she wrote and drew the
comic strip “Dykes to Watch Out
For.” She lives up a hill in Bolton.
dykestowatchoutfor.com

32

38

On Call
BY EDWARD KOREN

The Comic
Cashier

Jon Chad is a cartoonist and
illustrator living in White
River Junction, where he teaches
bookmaking and design at the
CCS. His newest graphic novel,
The BAD-ventures of Bobo Backslack, is out now from AdHouse
Books. jonchad.blogspot.com

42

Danny’s
Strawberry
Dream
BY HANNAH PALMER EGAN &
GLYNNIS FAWKS

BY RACHEL LINDSAY

ARTS NEWS
24

COLUMNS +
REVIEWS
5

BY ALISON BECHDEL

BY MARK DAVIS &
ELERI MAI HARRIS

BY KATHRYN FLAGG &
MELANIE GILLMAN

Melanie Gillman is a cartoonist
and Center for Cartoon Studies
(CCS) alumna based in Denver,
Colo. Her current primary project
is As the Crow Flies, an Eisnernominated graphic novel about
queer teens in Christian youth
camps. melaniegillman.com

Border Nexus:
Governance
at a Price

Matt Morris is a fine artist and
illustrator living in Winooski. A
graduate of the School of Visual
Arts and the Ringling College of
Art & Design, his work has appeared in publications including
the Los Angeles Times, Playboy,
American Illustration and Seven
Days. coolvaderart.com

12

Fair Game POLITICS
BY PAUL HEINZ
& TIM NEWCOMB

The Rooftops
of Burlington

Theo Ellsworth is the author
or Capacity, Sleeper Car and
The Understanding Monster.
He is the house artist for the
London-based record label Astral
Industries, and his work has been
featured in Best American Comics, Trip Magazine and Smoke
Signal. thoughtcloudfactory.com

18

Rubi’s Vision
BY ALICIA FREESE &
JOSH LEES

8 CONTENTS

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

BY SYDNEY LEA &
JAMES KOCHALKA

James Kochalka is a comic-book
artist, writer, musician and videogame designer from Burlington.
In 2011 he was declared the first
cartoonist laureate of Vermont.
He has won four Ignatz Awards,
the Harvey Award, and an Eisner
Award. His notable works include
the comic strip “American Elf,”
the Glorkian Warrior graphic
novel and video game, and the
SuperF*ckers series.

26

Edward Koren, the current
cartoonist laureate of Vermont,
is well known for his New Yorker
cartoons, and has contributed
to many other books and
periodicals. His work has been
exhibited in shows all over the
world, including a retrospective
at the University of Vermont in
2011. He has been a member of
the Brookfield Volunteer Fire Department for more than 25 years.
edwardkoren.com

34

Precious Medals
BY KEN PICARD &
ANDY WARNER

Rachel Lindsay is a cartoonist
and illustrator in Burlington.
She’s a graduate of Columbia
University, where she penned the
first graphic-novel thesis for any
undergraduate or graduate program. Her work appears in Maple
Key Comics and on her website,
where she publishes every Friday.
rachellivesherenow.com

39

Theater Review
BY ALEX BROWN &
NICOLE J. GEORGES

Glynnis Fawkes was named
among the Best American
Comics Notables in 2012 and
2013. She was awarded a
residency at la Maison des
Auteurs in Angouleme, France,
for 2015. She lives in Burlington
and teaches Comix Workshop at
the University of Vermont and
open life drawing at BCA Center.
glynnisfawkes.com

62

The Horse’s Ass
BY DAN BOLLES &
TOM AZARIAN

Tim Newcomb has work in
publications around the country,
as well as in books and on video,
CD and DVD covers. His editorial
cartoons, which won a first-place
award from the New England
Press Association, appear
weekly in Seven Days and the
Barre-Montpelier Times Argus.
newcombstudios.com

28

WTF CULTURE
BY XIAN CHIANG-WAREN &
JOHN KOVALESKI

Always Wanting
You, Never
Having You
BY ETHAN DE SEIFE &
AARON SHREWSBURY

Josh Lees was raised in the
Southwest and moved to
Vermont to attend the CCS,
from which he just graduated.
He draws a comic about teens
in space at star-teens.com, and
other comics about teens who
LARP and time-travel. josh-lees.
com

Andy Warner’s comics have been
published by Slate, American
Public Media, KQED, Popular
Science, the United Nations and
Buzzfeed. He is the cofounder
and coeditor of the Irene comics
anthology. He graduated in
2012 from the CCS, lives in San
Francisco and comes from the
sea. andywarnercomics.com
Aaron Shrewsbury hails from
West Virginia and came to Vermont to attend the CCS. He is a
graphic designer Seven Days.

Nicole J. Georges is the Lambda
Literary Award-winning author
of the graphic memoir Calling
Dr. Laura. She has recently completed a year as a fellow at the
CCS, and is hard at work on a new
graphic memoir about a very bad
dog. nicolejgeorges.com

Tom Azarian, the folk musician
Vermonters know as Tom Banjo,
has been a fixture on the Burlington music scene for decades. His
crowd-pleasing "cranky shows"
showcase both his music and artwork. He contributes an original
piece to this year's Cartoon Issue.

John Kovaleski is a cartoonist,
artist and teacher who lives with
his pianist wife and drumming
toddler. He is a contributor to
Mad Magazine, and his comic
strip “Bo Nanas” was syndicated
by the Washington Post Writers Group. John received his
MFA from Goddard College in
Plainfield, where his graduating
presentation included escaping
from a straitjacket. kovaleski.com

Phil Wassell attended St.
Johnsbury Academy. He has
exhibited his art often, and loves
to work with creative people
who are interested in privately
commissioned art. philwassell.
wix.com/art

44
63
67

Side Dishes FOOD
Soundbites MUSIC
Album Reviews

Luke Healy is a cartoonist from
Dublin, Ireland. In 2014, he
graduated with an MFA from the
CCS. His comic Of the Monstrous
Pictures of Whales recently won
an Award of Excellence from the
Society of Illustrators. lukewhealy.com

BY DAN BOLLES &
JASON COOLEY

70

Art Review
BY PAMELA PO LSTON
& DAKOTA MCFADZEAN

VER MON T’S IN DEP EN DEN T VOICE

Jason Cooley became an amateur musician through drawing
comics. He’s 40 years old and a
bartender in Burlington.

hy turn a whole issue of Seven Days into a big
comic book? Well, besides being a creative
challenge, comic art actually lends itself well
to what this newspaper is all about.
A sequential medium that tells stories with both
words and images is ready-made for journalistic purposes. Cartooning long ago shed its “Sunday funnies”
stigma and now is arguably in a golden age — one that
has ushered in a multitude of new indie comics, bestselling books, comic video games and even, in the case
of Alison Bechdel’s Fun Home, a graphic memoir-turnedmusical. The stories that comics can tell are not limited
by length or topic, and their stripped-down format is a
powerful way to convey ideas, whether in a news item
or an art review or an advice column.
Another reason to go graphic: Vermont has become
an internationally recognized center for comic art.
Much of the credit is due to White River Junction’s

Center for Cartoon Studies, from which several of this
issue’s contributors have graduated. (And many of
those who didn’t have another Vermont connection.)
Ours is also the only state to appoint an official Cartoonist Laureate, and we’re proud that this issue holds
contributions from both the first (James Kochalka of
Burlington) and the recently anointed (Edward Koren of
Brookfield). Cartooning is plainly thriving in Vermont.
And finally, comics are just cool. They’re enjoyable to
read, more complex than they appear, and brimming
with literary and illustrative verve. What more could a
reader want from a story — of any kind?
Most of the artists herein collaborated with Seven
Days reporters, but a few wrote and illustrated their
own tales. Take a moment to meet the cartoonists here
— we asked them all to draw self-portraits — and then,
please enjoy our second annual cartoon issue.

Ghostshrimp, aka Daniel Bandit,
has worked with Disney, Cartoon
Network, Nickelodeon, the New
Yorker, the New York Times, and
many other prestigious companies. He is also the vice chairman
of the zoning board in Hardwick,
where he homesteads with his
wife, Athena, and their son, Wolf.
ghostshrimp.net

Stuck in Vermont: From quarry to industrial
wasteland to recreational trail system,
Millstone Hill in Barre has seen a lot of change
over the past 100 years. The third annual
RockFire event last weekend celebrated the
area’s past and its present.

Underwritten by:

Discover fun
interactive content

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

Dakota McFadzean is a CCS
graduate whose work has appeared in The Best American
Comics, Mad Magazine and Narratively. His comics collection Other
Stories and the Horse You Rode in
On is available from Conundrum
Press. dakotamcfadzean.com

07.02.14-07.09.14
SEVEN DAYS
CONTENTS 9

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7/1/14 1:37 PM

1T-OGE070214.indd 1

6/30/14 11:41 AM

10

SEVEN DAYS
07.02.14-07.09.14 SEVENDAYSvt.com

looking forward

the

magnificent

Saturday 5

In Tune
Listen to Cricket Tell the Weather and one minute
you’ll hear bluegrass; another minute, hints of pop,
jazz and indie-rock surface. Powered by awardwinning songwriters Andrea Asprelli and Jason
Borisoff on fiddle and guitar, respectively, this fourpiece string band delivers a mixed bag of tricks with
each show. The rising talents perform at the Ripton
Community Coffeehouse.

Agricultural Adventures
From hedges and terraces to pet-friendly plans,
master gardener Joe Eck covers it all in Elements of
Garden Design. Drawing on decades of experience
tending North Hill, his famed seven-acre plot in
Readsboro, Eck caters to pros and novices alike. The
horticulturalist imparts his knowledge as part of
the Authors at the Aldrich series.
See calendar listing on page 55

Creative Process
Now in its 44th year, the Burklyn Arts Summer
Craft Fair takes over Lyndonville’s Bandstand
Park with a wide range of works by juried artisans.
Whether you’re in the market for pottery or paintings, more than 60 local vendors display their wares
alongside homemade eats and live entertainment.
See calendar listing on page 50

Thursday 3-Sunday 6

Independent Streak

See calendar listings on pages 56 and 57

® Dreamstime

Wisdom Teeth

Wednesday 2

Self-described as a “cabinet of curiosity,”
Glover’s Museum of Everyday Life elevates
mundane objects — think pencils and paper
clips — into subjects worthy of extensive
artistic pursuit. “Toothbrush From Twig to
Bristle in All Its Expedient Beauty” is no different. Featuring photos, sculptures, ephemera and more, the exhibit offers a unique
glimpse into the history of oral hygiene.

Voice Choice

See review on page 70

See calendar listing on page 48

Singer-songwriter Neko Case has true staying power.
An original member of the New Pornographers,
she debuted as a solo artist in 1997, soaring on
the strength of her poetic lyrics. The former punk
princess plays indie-rock, alt-country and Americana
with ease at the Flynn Center for the Performing Arts,
where she performs a benefit concert.

magnificent seven 11

’Tis the season for parades, barbecues
and fireworks! Revelers break out the red,
white and blue threads for Fourth of July
celebrations throughout the state. Large
and small, old and new, family-friendly
festivities feature everything from wagon
rides and tractor pulls to frog-jumping and
watermelon-eating contests.

Reading, book sale and signing, rock and roll t-shirts, and lively conversation with
brave saga.”
Stephen Kiernan, author of the non-fiction books Last“... harrowing,
Rights. .[A]and
Authentic Patriotism,
“Heartbreaking and frightening. . .The
book rings with poetry
and truth.
”
Monday,
July
7th
at 7:00 pm
as well as the novel The Curiosity.

Everyone present will have the chance to have a characterReading,
named
after them in
book sale and signing, rock and roll t-shirts, and lively conversation with
Global book launch! Stephen Kiernan
Stephen Kiernan, author of the non-fiction books Last Rights and Authentic Patriotism,
Chris’s next novel!
will interview Chris on the library stage!
to have
havethe
a chance
character
named
after you!
Everyone present will
to have
a character
named after themNew
in York Times
Chris’s next novel!
Bestselling Author
Chris Bohjalian
This event will be filmed by our media partner, RETN

Only weak people get help for mental
health problems.
Seeking professional help takes real strength.
GET THE FACTS. MAKE A DIFFERENCE. VISIT bRATTlEbORORETREAT.ORG/STANDUp

TUDY
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The study lasts about 2 months, and there is no
cost to participate. You may also be reimbursed
for your time and travel.

SEVEN DAYS

If your child is 2 – 17 years old and struggles with eczema, they may
be eligible for a local medical research study currently being offered at
Timber Lane Allergy & Asthma Research, LLC in Burlington. The study
is for an investigational, steroid-free eczema medication that is applied
directly to the skin.

07.02.14-07.09.14

STAND
Up TO
STIGMA

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

A
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15

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1921-2014, COLCHESTER
Betty Foster Bessette
passed away peacefully
on June 21, 2014. She was
born Betty Ruth Spear on
December 12, 1921, to Robert
and Dorothy (Moorby) Spear
in Burlington, Vt. She married Elwin H. Foster, who
passed away in May 1968,
with whom she had five
children: Norman, Elwin
Jr., Robert “Bob”, Steve and
Kenneth. She was also married to Howard Bessette,

who passed away in
September 1973. Betty was a
loving and generous person,
always putting everyone
before herself.
Left to cherish her
memory are sons Norman,
Robert, and Steve (Linda); 12
grandchildren; many greatgrandchildren; many greatgreat-grandchildren; nieces

and nephews John and
Carolyn Leo, Neil and Jackie
Wells, Annie Chamberlain,
and Jimmy and Patty Leo;
Betty’s special companion
Arthur Barber; extended
family; and friends.
A funeral service was held
at 10 a.m. on Monday, June
30, at the United Church in
Colchester. Visitation was
Sunday, June 29 from 2-5
p.m. at the LaVigne Funeral
Home and Cremation
Service, 132 Main St.,
Winooski, Vt. Donations in
Betty’s name may be made
to the American Heart
Association or the American
Cancer Association. Online
condolences may be shared
with the family at lavigne
funeralhome.com.

Anthony
Pfohler

1943-2014, COLCHESTER
Anthony Pfohler passed
away peacefully on June
22, 2014. He was born April
1, 1943, to Anton and Emma
(Garrow) Pfohler in Keeseville,
N.Y. Tony was an executive
in the grocery business. He
enjoyed golf, fishing and
woodworking and was a proud
member of the Catholic faith.
He is survived by his children: Toni (Lesley) Pfohler,
Robert (Cynthia) Pfohler, and
Michelle (Patrick) O’Donnell;
grandchildren: Dugan,
Joshua, Conroy, Emmakate,
and Caleb; sisters: Gloria
Young, Carolyn (Don)
Loreman, and Teresa (Don)
Whitaker; longtime friend

Rose O’Leary and family;
the mother of his children,
Patricia; extended family;
and many friends. He was
predeceased by his parents,
brother John Pfohler and
brother-in-law Robert Young.
A service will be held at
a later date in Keeseville.
Online condolences may
be shared with the family at lavignefuneralhome.
com. The family would

like to thank the staff at
Birchwood Terrace Special
Care Unit, especially Cheryl
Townsend, who went above
and beyond for Tony and his
family. Donations in Tony’s
name may be made to the
Alzheimer’s Association.
Arrangements are under
the care of LaVigne Funeral
Home and Cremation
Service, 132 Main St.,
Winooski, Vt.

Want to memorialize a
loved one in Seven Days?
Post your remembrance online and print
at lifelines.sevendaysvt.com. Or, contact us
at lifelines@sevendaysvt.com, 865-1020 x37

ot only has Merle
Haggard
written
some of country
music’s greatest songs, he’s
also led a hell of an interesting life. Haggard has rubbed
shoulders
with
every
member of the countrymusic royal family, as well
as with some pretty colorful
convicts. But in creating a
comic-book version of a representative incident from
the singer’s rich biography,
my colleague, cartoonist
Aaron Shrewsbury, and I
were drawn to a different
kind of story – one that
shows Haggard’s emotional
side.
The story so far (liberally adapted from Haggard’s
1981 autobiography, Sing
Me Back Home): On tour in
1976, Merle stays up late one
night in a Reno motel room,
drinking and smoking. He’s
overcome with desire for a
certain country songstress,
and his memory drifts back
to two cherished incidents:
one on a shared tour bus,
and another at the county
fair where he first heard
young Dolly sing. This page
is an excerpt from that
story.

You guys rock! During the voting round, we collected
more than 650,000 votes from 10,000+ readers.

HANG TIGHT...

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We know you’re dying to know the winners! Find all the results
on Wednesday, July 30, in the new Daysies Magazine
inserted into Seven Days and online at sevendaysvt.com.
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designate

CELEBRATE

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JULY 30

Write in your
favorites.

Pick the best from
top finalists.

See who won in
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WORK

VERMONTERS ON THE JOB by ethan de seife

Cooperative Counsel

SEVEN DAYS 07.02.14-07.09.14 SEVENDAYSvt.com
30 WORK

SEVEN DAYS: How did you arrive at
your legal specialty?
LADDIE LUSHIN: I left my job
[giving legal aid to Illinois prisoners]
when we moved to Vermont. Then
I had to decide: What was I going to
do with my life? In addition to having
a law degree [from the University of
Chicago], I have a CPA certificate. The
thing that came to my attention was
cooperatives, which need both legal
and accounting assistance. It’s turned
out that I use both of those skills
almost every day.
I discovered that the area of practice
I had gotten myself into was undeveloped. There were lawyers around for
co-ops, but these were things like huge

bill warrell

A

ttorney Laddie Lushin has
never advertised his services.
Nor does he try headlinegrabbing cases or drive a
glossy sedan. He is, in sum, far removed
from his sharply tailored peers. But
Lushin’s area of specialization also
distinguishes him from most other attorneys: cooperative law.
A Braintree resident, Lushin (pronounced “LOO-shin”; “Laddie” is short
for Ladislaus) moved to Vermont from
Chicago in the
late 1970s. He
Name
chose a new
Laddie Lushin
home where cooperatively run
Town
businesses have
Braintree
a strong foothold: Groceries,
Job
utilities,
even
Expert in
ski resorts opercooperative law
ate as co-ops in
Vermont. Yet the
great majority of his business comes
from out of state, Lushin says, as few
other U.S. lawyers share his bailiwick.
Lushin’s local clients have enthusiastic praise for him and his work. Without
his help, “We would have been struggling
for years to get good legal bylaws,” says
Dan MacArthur, chair of the board of
the Marlboro Cooperative grocery store.
“He just said, ‘Here’s what you should be
doing.’ Everything he suggested was just
right.”
John Quinney, general manager
of Colchester-based Energy Co-op of
Vermont, describes Lushin as “someone who’s obviously got really strong
values,” and even calls him “an unsung
hero” — phrases seldom used to describe
lawyers.

SD: Why is it so important for a coop’s bylaws to be legally sound?
LL: Bylaws provide guidance for
operational decision making, and the
framework for resolving problems easily
and favorably. For example: Access to
books and records should be available
to any interested co-op member, since
they have ownership stakes in the
co-op. But this can be used in ways
that are disadvantageous for the co-op.
With a food co-op, the manager of the
competing store down the road can
acquire an ownership interest in the
co-op, but it’s not appropriate for that
person to be given access to books and
records … You have to have provisions
on that subject in your organizing
documents.
SD: You’ve made it a point to avoid
legalese in your writing. Why is that?
LL: Bylaws serve as guidance for
proper governance and practice of the
organization, so they’ve got to be usable,
readable and accessible to members.
That’s why I like to write in plain English
— so people can find the answers they’re
looking for without having to read a 10page document.
SD: Why do you think cooperatives
have been so successful in Vermont?
LL: I think it’s because of the
progressive character of the state
and the people in it. There’s a bigger
percentage of cooperatives that pop up
in such places than in most other states.
But cooperatives aren’t a left-wing
phenomenon at all. They transcend left
or right, Democrats or Republicans.
Everyone can get into it because it’s a
mutually beneficial thing.

agricultural co-ops in the Midwest. But
for smaller organizations like consumer
co-ops, there wasn’t any development
of how the law applied. I saw myself immersed in issues that no one had worked
out. Things like federal income-tax law,
securities law, consumer protection
laws. I had to essentially develop the law
of cooperatives in order to function in
that field.
SD: Some of your clients say they
feel you have a personal investment
in cooperative principles. Is that so?
LL: Definitely. I was mainly interested
in doing public-service kinds of things,
not just in helping the people with the
most bucks. I was looking for something
different, and cooperatives certainly

fit that scheme, because their business
operations are organized on completely
different principles than the prevailing
model.
SD: Why do you think your clients
seem so appreciative of your
services?
LL: Up until very recently, there
weren’t any other cooperative
specialists, other than myself, in the
whole country. Without me, [clients’]
only choice was to go to a local lawyer
who had no idea what the problems
and solutions are for co-ops. It turns
out that a good part of my time is spent
correcting inappropriate legal advice
from someone who didn’t know
enough about the subject.

SD: I read that you describe yourself
as an anarchist. True?
LL: I do consider myself an anarchist.
SD: You don’t hear a lot of lawyers
say that.
LL: No, you don’t. It’s a philosophical
position, and it’s one reason I do the
kind of work that I do. It’s consistent
with my value structure. I guess it tends
to manifest itself in a lifestyle that is not
typical of a lawyer. m

INFO
Work is a monthly interview feature
showcasing a Vermonter with an interesting
occupation. Suggest a job you would like to
know more about: news@sevendaysvt.com.

THE STRAIGHT DOPE BY CECIL ADAMS

Dear Cecil,

Why is it so many gay people are attracted to those of the same sex who
look like the opposite sex? If you are a gay man and presumably do not
fancy women, why are you nonetheless attracted to other men who copy
feminine qualities? If you don’t want women, it seems strange to want
your male partner to act and look like one! The same for lesbians — they
don’t like men, yet many of them try to look like men and seem to find
that attractive in their female partners.
Nancy
slim bodies. However,
that’s hardly evidence of
a lesbian preference for
masculine-looking partners.
While straights may prefer
thin bodies today, a glance
through an art history book
suggests the earth-mother
type (heavyset, usually but not
always with prominent breasts
and hips) has been a muchadmired physique throughout
history, presumably by parties
of various sexual orientations.
• One study of personal ads
from 1997 found that in ads
placed by lesbians, 75 percent
of the terms used to describe
sought-after traits in a partner
were characteristically
feminine (most frequently
seen: the word “feminine”
itself ), whereas 95 percent
of the traits that the women
actively didn’t want were
masculine. Further support, in
my opinion, for the hypothesis
that among lesbians the most
popular type is the earth
mother.
• Generalizing about gay
males is tougher. The same
study of personal ads found
more than 96 percent of
the traits gay men sought
in their partners were

characteristically masculine,
and all of the undesirable
traits were feminine. What
exactly those terms mean
is debatable, though — gay
men have been found to
exhibit a wider spectrum of
stereotypically masculine
and feminine mannerisms
and speech patterns than
straight men. It may be helpful
to distinguish body type
and behavioral preferences.
Surveys notwithstanding,
gay men’s appreciation of a
well-toned male body surely
is at least the equal of straight
men’s tendency to drool over
a shapely woman; nobody’s
going to claim the gay guys
at CrossFit look effeminate.

INFO

Is there something you need to get straight? Cecil Adams can deliver
the Straight Dope on any topic. Write Cecil Adams at the Chicago
Reader, 11 E. Illinois, Chicago, IL 60611, or cecil@chireader.com.

07.02.14-07.09.14

No Down Payment USDA Program
• No Limit on seller contributions or gift funds

• Areas that are not eligible are Burlington, South Burlington,
Winooski, Essex Junction and parts of Colchester. All other towns
in VT are eligible.

SEVEN DAYS

You DO NOT need to be a 1st time home buyer
• Low Monthly Mortgage Insurance

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

while more material concerns
(“successful,” “financially
secure,” “owns a nice house”)
were at the bottom.
• The problem with such
surveys, of course, is that
respondents may simply be
saying what they think they
ought to say. An alternative
gauge of what people find
attractive is what they
ask for in personal ads
(granted, few are entirely
frank in this venue, either).
A common finding is that
straight men tend to look for
physical attractiveness and
promise financial success,
while straight women look
for success and promise
attractiveness. In contrast,
lesbians advertising for
partners generally downplay
attractiveness and success and
emphasize personality traits
such as sincerity and honesty.
• A 2001 study asking lesbian
and bisexual women what
body types they considered
most attractive found a strong
preference for heavy, bigbreasted physiques, followed
closely by heavy, smallbreasted ones. This contrasts
with heterosexuals, with both
sexes strongly preferring

CARAMAN

A

h, a fellow anthropologist, just back from the
field. How shrewd of
you to disguise yourself
as a complete dumbshit.
Needless to say, gays’ and lesbians’ appearance and behavior don’t
line up especially well with stereotypes based on atypical examples.
You see some pretty serious actingout in the World Cup; it’d be foolish to conclude from this that all
Uruguayans bite. What we need is
some data. The scholarly literature
on what homosexuals find attractive isn’t as robust as we might like,
and for some reason has focused
more on lesbians than gay men.
However, we do find the following:
• Asking people what they
find attractive in a romantic
partner tends to produce
predictable results. For
example, in a 2010 survey
conducted in northern
California, both lesbians and
gay men reported that what
they’d initially been most
attracted to in their partners
were personality traits:
“fun,” “sense of humor” and
“intelligent” were at the top
of the list for both groups.
Physical characteristics
(“sexy,” “appearance,” “nice
body”) were in the middle,

Behavior is another story.
A perennial controversy
in the gay community pits
“gay-acting” types against
gay males who in terms of
manner and appearance
are indistinguishable from
straights.
• A related question is whether
in a gay or lesbian relationship
one of the partners habitually
assumes the masculine role
while the other plays the
female. True, a subset of
lesbians identify as either
butch (masculine) or femme
(feminine). However,
one study of lesbians and
bisexual women found
butch types accounted for
at most 15 percent. Assuming
butch and femme women
pair off, such couples would
be in the minority of lesbian
relationships.
• A study of gay Latino men
found that their adoption
of dominant or submissive
roles was situational and
depended upon the perceived
masculinity of their
partners. If they considered
a partner more masculine
than themselves, they’d
be more likely to play the
pasivo (bottom) during sex.
Conversely, if their partner
was less masculine, they were
more likely to be the activo
(top).
So, do gay men and lesbians
find different things attractive than
straights do? Absolutely. Does that
mean gays prefer girly men and
lesbians prefer mannish women?
That’s absurd.

Welcome Home Local
to the

MUSIC
YOU LOVE

Hero
R
B y E T h An d E S E iF E

eaders of the New Yorker can
recognize Edward Koren’s
work at a glance: His frizzy,
big-nosed characters have,
over five decades and more than
1,000 drawings, become icons of the
magazine’s commitment to cartooning. Residents of Vermont know — or
should know — that Koren is only the
second person to hold the title of State
Cartoonist Laureate. (The work of
the first Vermont cartoonist laureate,
James Kochalka, is also featured in this
issue; see page 24.)

Great Songs from the
‘70s, ‘80s and ‘90s

32 FEATURE

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSVt.com

But few beyond Koren’s neighbors
know that, for the past 26 years, he has
been a volunteer with the Brookfield
Volunteer Fire Department. Koren
calls his other, less public job a “tonic,”
in that it allows him to connect with
his community — and to occasionally
escape from the demands of his drawing board. Even when he’s inking, he
wears his emergency pager.
Koren is a modest fellow, reluctant
to write or draw about his own life. But
he kindly agreed to Seven Days’ request
to write and illustrate a firehouse anecdote that humorously shows how
he finds the balance between his two
unusual careers. m

Champlain Valley &
Northern Vermont
34v-RadioVtGroup070214.indd 1

101.7

& 101.5

Rutland & Southern
Champlain Valley
7/1/14 10:10 AM

draw n b y
ed ward kore n

SEVENDAYSvt.com
07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVEN DAYS

FEATURE 33

34 FEATURE

SEVEN DAYS
07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSvt.com

he

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Add a little sizzle

RTY
PA
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SINGLE

Speed Dating
e!
and I-Spy Liv

SPEED DATERS: Thereʼs no guarantee everyone will be able to participate,
but please register and check in when you arrive. Names will be called
before each round. (No need to register for the Singles Party itself.)

COME EARLY! SPACE IS LIMITED!

ZEN LOUNGE
165 CHURCH ST.
BURLINGTON

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SEVEN DAYS

or call 865-1020 x 36

DOORS: 7:30PM, PARTY: 8PM • 21+

07.02.14-07.09.14

Register at
sevendaysvt.com

THURSDAY, JULY 17

SEVENDAYSvt.com

featuring:

Live music from:

DJ DISCO PHANTOM
& FUNKWAGON

35

1t-singles-zenlounge.indd 1

6/24/14 4:44 PM

SEVENDAYSVT.COM
07.02.14-07.09.14
SEVEN DAYS
36 FEATURE

Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic by Alison Bechdel was published In 2006. The Musical Adaptation ran at Manhattanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Public Theater September 2013 to January 2014.

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his past weekend, strawberries
hit peak season, and across the
state, small towns celebrated
with strawberry festivals — afternoon affairs where locals convene for
the sole purpose of eating strawberry
shortcake. For Seven Days’ second
annual Cartoon Issue, we offer a fanciful
take on this delicious, age-old Vermont
tradition.

Pleased to meet you.

The heyday passed in the postwar
period — due to blights, plagues and general agricultural decline — but Bradford
continues to host an annual strawberry
festival featuring berries from Pierson
Farm and other area fields. The fest was
last weekend, but Vermont’s farms are
still heavy with fruit, so if you haven’t
already, go pick a pint and have yourself
a shortcake.

VERMONT’S FARMS ARE STILL HEAVY WITH FRUIT,
SO IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY, GO PICK A PINT

The Vermont side of the Upper
Valley has a long strawberry history.
Local historian Larry Coffin (disclosure: he was my teacher in high
school), says Bradford’s wide, fertile
plain was once “synonymous with
really fine strawberries.” Between
the 1840s and the 1960s, demand
was so high that stores in Boston and
New York would advertise “Bradford
Berries” even if the fruit was actually
grown elsewhere.
At that time, Coffin writes on his
blog In Times Past, migrant families flocked to the area, camping in
the fields during the berry harvest.
Several trains a day stopped at
Bradford’s depot to take on berries,
and the railroad built an extra siding
south of town to accept bushels from
outlying fields.

Seven Days caught up with Bradford
Strawberry Festival’s Linda Moore, who
says the recipe is a snap: “Most of the
[shortcakes] are Bisquick,” she says.
“It’s just the recipe from the box.” Every
other Vermonter I know makes them
the same way.
As for the berries, Moore says it
starts with a taste test. “It’s about how
sweet the berries are,” she says. “That
changes by year. And at the end of the
season, they’re sweeter … The trouble
is, we don’t measure anything, we just
throw sugar in until it’s right.”
Also, buying the right cream helps:
“The secret to the cream is using heavy
cream, not ‘whipping cream,’” Moore
advises. “You can whip it the day before
and it will not separate.” m
Contact: hannah@sevendaysvt.com

food
dr awn by gly nni s fawk e s

SEVENDAYSvt.com
07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVEN DAYS

FOOD 43

sIDEdishes

[title
of show]

by hannah palmer egan & alice levit t

A hilarious, heart-warming musical
by two New York nobodies
SHOW DATES:
Thursday, June 19 - Saturday, July 5 8 p.m.

802.862.2777

Grass Is
Greener

lOcavOre meat market
expanDs tO shelburne
GrEEN PASturE mEAtS, which
opened in New Haven
last May, will get a second
location in Shelburne this
month. Production manager
Jim BlAiS is no stranger to the
town; he worked as a butcher
at ShElBurNE SuPErmArkEt for
22 years before joining Green
Pasture owner mArk Smith in
his burgeoning business.

6/12/14 3:39 PM

cOurtesy OF alice levitt

SEVENDAYSVt.com
07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVEN DAYS

Spanish meats and cheeses
at Uncle Pop Pop’s

The case at Green Pasture Meats

Blais says that, with the
expansion, he and Smith
112 Lake Street • Burlington
hope to reach Burlington as
www.sansaivt.com
well as Shelburne shoppers
with their all-local meat. And
when he says local, he means
12v-SanSai010913.indd 1
1/7/13 2:08 PM
it. Smith owns Vermont’s
first large-animal mobile
slaughter unit, which his
team brings directly to farms
Summer Deals!
to supply the case at his
store. “It certainly comes out
in the quality of the meats,”
Blais says.
Most of the animals,
which go from slaughter to
cutting to case under the
1 large, 1-topping pizza,
auspices of GPM, originated
12 wings and a 2 liter Coke product
on Addison County farms.
DucloS & thomPSoN FArm in
Weybridge is a major pork
2 large, 1-topping pizzas
supplier to GPM, while beef
& 2-liter Coke product
comes from Blais’ family
farm in Ferrisburgh and
Plus tax. Pick-up or delivery only. Expires 7/31/14.
limit: 1 offer per customer per day.
Smith FAmilY FArm in New
973 Roosevelt Highway
Haven. The last is owned by
Colchester • 655-5550
Rep. hArVEY Smith (R-New
www.threebrotherspizzavt.com
Haven), a major proponent of

$19.99
$24.99

44 FOOD

Mark Smith’s (no relation)
original proposal to begin his
mobile slaughter business.
The second Green Pasture
Market is located at 5247
Shelburne Road, the former
site of Next Door Bakery,
beside the BEArDED FroG BAr
& Grill, which also serves
the supplier’s meats. The
space will allow Blais to sell
a larger selection of meat, he
says, as well as local bread
and cheeses.
— A.l.

or stand and snack at a long,
high ledge. McGinnis is excited about Basque-language
signage on a Coca-Cola
cooler: “It looks fly, and no
one else is doing that, you
know? That’s Basque and
you’re eating Basque food,”
he says.
McGinnis wants to keep
prices low: A meatloaf
sandwich on challah packs
a full-size portion for $5.95,
and many dishes ring up
under $5, a price point he
plans to maintain by sourcing
food locally. “Certain things
I can’t get locally,” McGinnis
acknowledges. “You’re not
going to find avocado here.

cOurtesy OF hannah palmer egan

Reservations Recommended

TICKETS: $20 adults
802-253-3961
stowetheatre.com, or at the box office.

12v-stowetheater061814.indd 1

McGinnis says he likes
Spanish food for its comparative lightness. “I didn’t feel like
I was anchored to the ground
every time I ate a Spanish
cheese,” he says, his voice
humming with hardscrabble
Jersey inflection. McGinnis’
gait is a tough-guy swagger, but
when chatting about food, he’s
all friendly smiles. He’s clearly
excited to bring fine Spanish
cheese and charcuterie —
manchego and iberico cheeses,
dry-cured smoked chorizo and
Serrano ham — to Vermont.
(He’ll also serve a selection of
local cheeses.)
In addition to meat and
cheese, Pop Pop’s menu will

Spanish Flair

uncle pOp pOp’s sanDwich &
tapas shOp Opens in essex

Back in April, ADAm mcGiNNiS
told Seven Days he hoped to
open uNclE PoP PoP’S SANDwich
& tAPAS ShoP in Essex by
late spring. But restaurants
being restaurants — invariably delayed — the date got
pushed back until … now.
The storefront restaurant,
located in the Essex Towne
Marketplace, soft-opened late
last week with an abridged
menu and will welcome
guests for the first night of full
service this Saturday, July 5.
Chef-owner McGinnis
says he hopes the tapas joint
— northern Vermont’s only —
will become an early-evening
social hub. “I’d like to bring
the [Spanish] tradition of
going out after work for a
couple cocktails, maybe some
light snacks, to this area.”

offer a rotating cast of bocadillos (sandwiches), pinxtos
(finger snacks) and à la carte
small plates. The chef-owner,
a South Jersey native, says
he got into Spanish cooking
while working at a school
for youth offenders doing
time in adult prison. “It was
a pretty notorious school
for a lot of the things that
happened there. It was
notoriously — hair-raising,”
he says. “Jersey’s tough.” But
the kitchen was a great place
to unwind. “I’d come home
and spend a couple hours
cooking dinner,” McGinnis
says.
In Essex, the small space
is set up for convivial dining
and punctuated by fun details
that give it a sense of place.
Diners can gather around a
broken U-shaped bar for rum
tastings and Spanish wines
and cocktails (at press time,
the liquor license is pending)

But with everything else,
I’m going to do everything I
can to buy local and cut the
middle-man prices out.”
And, though he says he
hasn’t found the right local
charcuterie supplier just
yet, he is undeterred: “Oh,
I’ll get it. I will find that
charcuterie.”
— h.P.E.

cENtEr’s weekly Burlington
showcase of local food and
music, kicks off its season on
July 3 and will run Thursdays
through August 28, from
5:30 to 8 p.m. This year,
food vendors will source

more food after the
classifieds section. page 45

GOT A FOOD TIP? FOOD@SEVENDAYSVT.COM

Dinner and a Show

• Authentic Italian Food •

THE GRYPHON LANDS IN BURLINGTON’S
VERMONT HOUSE

Proximity to the Flynn Center for the
Performing Arts is a major ingredient in
PAIGE GROSS’ plans for her new restaurant,
the GRYPHON. The restaurant space on
Burlington’s Main Street is currently being
restored and renovated to capitalize on its
location in the historic Vermont House,
most recently filled by Ramen.
Gross says she sees the Gryphon as a
pre- and post-theater destination with
American bistro fare and a full-service
bar. “I want it to be casual and comfortable, but also a place to have an upscale,
nice meal if you need to,” she says.
Gross is opening the restaurant with her husband, TOM CHADWICK, and her
ex-husband, chef ANDREA GROSS, with whom she previously owned a restaurant in
Pinehurst, N.C.
“He’s been a chef for about 40 years; he’s wonderful,” says Andrea Gross’
amicable ex. The chef is a native of Switzerland, but after spending recent years
cooking in a German restaurant, Paige Gross says, he’s burnt out on his native
cuisine and looking forward to trying something new. Gryphon diners will
probably find traces of Alpine fare only in a seasonal game dish, Paige Gross
says. They’re more likely to taste hints of spice reminiscent of her Alabama
upbringing.
The 50-seat restaurant will serve lunch and dinner, as well as Sunday brunch.
Though the space will boast comfy leather couches and a new bar, “I don’t really
want it to be a bar scene,” says Gross. “We want people to come out of the Flynn
and have a nice dinner.”
— A.L.

The 2014 vendors include old favorites such as
¡DUINO! (DUENDE), BLUEBIRD
BARBECUE and EL CORTIJO.
Burlington High School’s
FORK IN THE ROAD food truck
is new this season, as is
free, super-secure valet
bike parking so cyclists
needn’t fear the modern
horse thief.
Scheduled shows
include the DuPont
Brothers, Barika,
and Bow Thayer and

PICK YOUR OWN
STRAWBERRIES

SEVEN DAYS

100 percent of their
meat locally, according
to Intervale Community
Relations Manager JOYCE
CELLARS. “We’re really
looking for transparency
in sourcing for all the
products [being sold
here],” she says. “That’s
what distinguishes
Summervale from some
of these other wonderful
community events that
are happening — here, it’s
really all about the food.”

Wielding the Pen
Among political cartoonists, Jeff Danziger is a living legend. Twice short-listed
for the Pulitzer Prize, he regularly contributes to publications such as the New
York Times and, since 1975, the Times Argus and Rutland Herald. Splitting his
time between New York City and his home in Groton, the artist maintains strong
ties to Vermont — having first moved to the state in 1971 upon returning from the
Vietnam War. Known for biting social commentary, Danziger’s unapologetic art
has earned him legions of fans and foes. His most recent book, The Conscience of
a Cartoonist, offers an in-depth exploration of post-9/11 America.

you can also email us at calendar@sevendaysvt.com.
to be listed, yoU MUST include the name of event, a brief description,
specific location, time, cost and contact phone number.

CALENDAR EVENTS IN SEVEN DAYS:

Listings and spotlights are written by courtney copp. SEVEN DAYS edits for space
and style. Depending on cost and other factors, classes and workshops may be
listed in either the Calendar or the Classes section. When appropriate, class
organizers may be asked to purchase a Class listing.

JUL.2-9
| THEATER
YOUR

SCAN THIS PAGE
WITH LAYAR
SEE PAGE 5

TEXT

Hole inHERE
One

What Caddyshack is to cinema, The
Fox on the Fairway is to the stage.
This comedic romp through Quail
Valley Country Club features a motley
crew of characters entrenched in
the drama surrounding an annual
golf tournament with a rival club.
Reminiscent of the Marx Brothers’
over-the-top comedies, Ken Ludwig’s
homage to the great farces of the 1930s
and ’40s keeps audience members on
the edge of their seats. From mistaken
identities to romantic pitfalls, a fastpaced series of catastrophes propels
this laugh-a-minute Saint Michael’s
Playhouse production, starring top
theatrical talents directed by Kathryn
Markey.

‘The Fox on the Fairway’
Wednesday, July 2, and Thursday, July
3, 8 p.m.; Saturday, July 5, 2 and 8 p.m.;
Tuesday, July 8, and Wednesday, July 9, 8
p.m., at McCarthy Arts Center, St. Michael’s
College, in Colchester. See website for
future dates. $35-44. Info, 654-2281.
saintmichaelsplayhouse.org

T

here are no two ways
around it: JJ Grey was
born to make music.
The Florida native stops
listeners in their tracks with
a style the New York Times
describes as “impassioned
singing, riff-based Southern
rock, cold-blooded swamp funk
and sly Memphis soul.” Known
for live shows fueled by his
gravely voice, soulful guitar
and no-nonsense songwriting,
Grey lays everything on the
line each time he takes the
stage. Backed by his band
Mofro, he delivers upbeat
dance tunes and heartwrenching ballads in equal
measure at the Jay Peak
Music Series and the Montréal
International Jazz Festival.

Courtesy of Jeff Danziger

Page Turner

JUL.7 | WORDS
Courtesy of Chris Bohjalian

JUL.9 | WORDS

Emily Shepard lives in an igloo made of trash bags filled with frozen
leaves. As a teenage runaway, she fled to Burlington after a meltdown in a
Northeast Kingdom nuclear power plant — possibly caused by her father
— killed both parents. Orphaned, homeless and haunted by her past, the
narrator of Chris Bohjalian’s latest novel Close Your Eyes, Hold Hands crafts
a new identify in the face of an uncertain future. Kicking off his Rock and
Roll Book Tour, the best-selling author joins fellow wordsmith Stephen
Kiernan for an onstage interview. Lit lovers, take note: Attendees have the
chance to win a character named after them in Bohjalian’s next novel.

Shannon Bryant & Shelly Pottorf: The
Texas-based green builder and eco-architect
present "In the Belly of the Beast: Living
Building Challenge and Other Alternative
Approaches in the Shadow of Big Oil."
Yestermorrow Design/Build School, Waitsfield, 7
p.m. Free. Info, 496-5545.

'The Three Little Pigs': Weston Playhouse's
Young Company of Broadway puts a new twist
on the classic fairy tale for the young and the
young at heart. Weston Playhouse, 4 p.m. $8-15.
Info, 824-5288.
Voxfest: Visiting artists and community members join Dartmouth College students, faculty
and alumni to create a new work in and around
the museum in Vox Barter. Hood Museum,
Dartmouth College, Hanover, N.H., 7 p.m. Free.
Info, 603-646-2422.

This five-day course is a comprehensive, practical, and technical
guide to cheese technology and the principles governing the
quality of cheese. Participants will learn the fundamentals of
cheesemaking as well as quality control practices and useful
considerations in starting a small-scale cheesemaking business.

ron PadGett: The acclaimed author of more
than 20 poetry collections excerpts selected
works as part of the Vermont College of Fine
Arts Visiting Writers Reading Series. College
Hall Chapel, Vermont College of Fine Arts,
Montpelier, 7 p.m. Free. Info, 828-8599.

SEVENDAYSVt.com

birdS by earS & eyeS: Fans of feathered fliers
embark on a woodland adventure bursting with
birdsong. Little River State Park, Waterbury, 11
a.m. $2-3; free for kids 3 and under; preregister;
call to confirm. Info, 244-7103.
the Good, the bad and the really,
really itChy: Hikers learn to identify poison
ivy, medicinal jewelweed and other local
plants. Nature Center, Little River State Park,
Waterbury, 1:30 p.m. $2-3; free for kids 3
and under; preregister; call to confirm. Info,
244-7103.
roCkin' the little riVer: Visitors explore a
reforested encampment and discover how the
Civilian Conservation Corps saved the Winooski
Valley from flooded ruin. Meet at the top of
the Waterbury Dam. Little River State Park,
Waterbury, 7 p.m. $2-3; free for kids 3 and under; preregister; call to confirm. Info, 244-7103.
SteVenSon brook Walk: Adventure-seekers
slip into their water shoes for a guided hike in
and along the spring-fed stream. Little River
State Park, Waterbury, 3:30 p.m. $2-3; free for
kids 3 and under; preregister; call to confirm.
Info, 244-7103.

VOLUNTEERS NEEDED

Adamant Music School

calendar

Master Classes with
John O’Conor

July 5-9 at 1:30-5:30pm

FRI.4

Open to members and the public
at a cost of $50 per day.

Participant Piano Concerts
July 8 & 9 at 7:30 pm

All concerts are free for members,
guest admission is $10. Seniors/Students: $6.

First FridAy reloAded: 'CelebrAte
QueermeriCA': Live music, costume contests
and go-go dancers make for a fireworks display
all their own when Vermont's largest, longestrunning queer dance party returns with a bang.
Higher Ground, South Burlington, 9 p.m. $5-10.
Info, 877-987-6487.

montréal
'tHe FoX to
on have
tHe Fairway':
See WED.2,named
2 p.m.
Everyone present will have the chance
a character
after them in
Reading, book sale and signing, rock and roll t-shirts, and lively conversation with

vely conversation with
and Authentic Patriotism,
nd frightening. . .The
book rings with poetry
and truth.
”
Monday,
July
7th
at 7:00 pm

ROCK & ROLL BOOK TOUR

calendar

A] brave saga.” - Booklist

TUE.8

- Jeanne Bogino, Library Journal

Fletcher Free Library,
235 College Street, Burlington

amed after them in

ding, book sale and signing, rock and roll t-shirts, and lively conversation with
Global book launch! Stephen Kiernan
hen Kiernan, author of the non-fiction books Last Rights and Authentic Patriotism,
will interview Chris on the library stage!
well as the novelExclusive
The Curiosity.
t-shirt giveaway! Win the chance

to have
havethe
a chance
character
named
after you!
yone present will
to have
a character
named after themNew
in York Times
s’s next novel!
Bestselling Author
Chris Bohjalian
will be filmed by our media partner, RETN

Community College of vermont
information SeSSion: Potential students
meet with academic advisers to learn about
courses and programs offered throughout
the summer. Community College of Vermont
Middlebury Campus, 5:15 p.m. Free. Info,
388-3032.

Browse 2,000+ profiles and connect with
local singles at sevendaysvt.com, a trusted,
online community powered by Vermonters.
Now through August 31, start unlimited conversations
for only $15 a month (usually $30).
— OFFER EXPIRES AUGUST 31 —
2v-halfoff-personals.indd 1

english as a second language class: See
WED.2.
inteRMediate sPanish lessons: See WED.2.
inteRMediate/advanced english as a
second language class: See WED.2.
italian conveRsation gRouP: Parla
Italiano? A native speaker leads a language
practice for all ages and abilities. Room 101,
St. Edmund's Hall, St. Michael's College,
Colchester, 7-9 p.m. Free. Info, 899-3869.

Live bands and fun-filled activities — including an air show, obstacle course and bounce
house — set the scene for spectacular
fireworks over Lake Champlain. July 3, 4
p.m.-dusk; fireworks at 9:30 p.m., various
waterfront locations. Info, 864-0123.
enjoyburlington.com

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSvt.com

Barton
Agricultural amusements — from a tractor
pull to games on horseback — kick off the
festivities. A grand parade at 3 p.m. leads
from downtown to the fairgrounds; fireworks
follow at dusk. July 4, 9 a.m.-dusk, Orleans
County Fairgrounds. $7; free for kids under
10. Info, 525-3555. orleanscountyfair.net

Brandon
Family fun kicks off on Friday with a food
fest and street dance. Saturday festivities
include karaoke, a bounce house, children’s
games, a 1 p.m. parade and afternoon music.
Fireworks burst over the village at dusk. July
4, 5 p.m., and July 5, 10 a.m.-dusk, Central
Park. Info, 247-6401. brandon.org

Bristol
The small town celebrates the Fourth in a
big way with live music, games, crafts and a
bright lights show ending Thursday evening
with a bang. The Great Bristol Outhouse
Race, a 5K road race and a themed parade
extend the fun to Friday. July 3, 6 p.m.-dusk,
and July 4, 7:30 a.m., various downtown
locations. Info, 453-5451. bristol4th.com

56 CALENDAR

Burke
Revelers chow down at an outdoor barbecue
and soak up the scenery from the chairlifts
before an exciting display of sky bursts. July
5, 6:30 p.m., Burke Mountain Ski Resort.
Info, 626-7300. skiburke.com

Cabot
A Main Street parade leads to an afternoon
of fun in the sun, including field games and
a chicken barbecue. July 4, 11 a.m., Cabot
Recreation Field. Info, 563-9907.

Colchester
Amateur athletes make strides at a fun run,
then take in a Main Street parade and evening
concerts before a fireworks finale at Bayside
Beach. July 4, 8:15 a.m.-dusk, various locations. Info, 264-5640. colchestervt.gov

2014
Independence Day

Celebrations

Essex

Jay

Independence Day makes a splash at the
swimming pool. Live music, a bounce castle,
an obstacle course and fireworks round out
the day. July 4, 6 p.m.; fireworks at 9:30 p.m.,
Maple Street Park. Rain location: Essex High
School ice rink. Info, 878-1375. ejrp.org

An old-fashioned town parade kicks off
family-friendly entertainment complete with
frog-jumping and watermelon-eating contests. Head to Smugglers’ Notch Resort at 5
p.m. for the Firemen’s Barbecue on the Green,
patriotic music by the Vermont National
Guard 40th Army Band and mountaintop
fireworks. July 4, 10 a.m.-dusk, various locations. Info, 644-1118. smuggs.com

A two-mile parade route to the recreation
park is followed by the always-popular Ducky
Race, now in its 22nd year. July 4, 1 p.m.,
Fairfax Community Park. Info, 849-6111, ext.
8. fairfaxrecreation.com

Greensboro
“The Funky Fourth of July” features a lively
parade, music, games and fireworks at dusk.
July 5, 9:30 a.m.-dusk, various locations.
Info, 533-2911. greensborovt.org

Island Pond
Three days of festivities are jam-packed with
a duck race, parade, music and fireworks.
July 4-6, all day, at various locations. Info,
673-1854. islandpondchamber.org

Jeffersonville

Killington
High spirits fly at this Fourth of July celebration, which includes a parade, barbecue potluck, pool party and nighttime fireworks. July
4, 10 a.m., Herbert I. Johnson Recreation
Center. Info, 422-2105. killingtontown.com

Ludlow

Plymouth Notch

Shelburne

Warren

Blues and reggae artists steal the stage at
the picnic-friendly Great American Party.
Midway games, a water slide and barbecue
eats round out the day. July 5, 1-8 p.m.,
Okemo Mountain Resort. Info, 228-1600.
okemo.com

Locals celebrate the only U.S. president born
on Independence Day with a gravesite ceremony, wagon rides, a chicken barbecue and
historic presentations. July 4, noon, Village
Green. Info, 672-3773. calvin-coolidge.org

For the 52nd year, the church hosts an
auction and bazaar, followed by its famed
chicken barbecue with all the fixings. July 4,
9 a.m., Shelburne United Methodist Church.
Info, 985-3981.

Randolph

South Hero

Thousands don red, white and blue to attend
one of the state’s largest parades. Afterward,
they head to Lincoln Peak for a barbecue,
live music by the Detonators and dazzling
fireworks come nightfall. July 4, 10 a.m.-10
p.m., various locations. Info, 496-3409.
madrivervalley.com

Folks reflect on American life in a themed
promenade and street fest featuring unique
floats, antique cars and live entertainment.
July 4, 10 a.m., Merchant’s Row. Info, 7289027. whiterivervalleychamber.com

A colorful themed parade starts at the
corner of Landon Road and South Street and
features patriotic tunes from the 40th Army
Band. July 4, 11 a.m., various locations. Info,
372-5566. champlainislands.com

Rochester

Stowe

Patriots celebrate the nation’s birthday with
a community parade followed by barbecue
eats, live music and a dramatic reading of
the Declaration of Independence. July 4, 11
a.m., Rochester Park. Info, 767-3025.
rochestervermont.org

This old-fashioned celebration begins with
marching music in the Moscow parade. A
Village Festival complete with face painting,
music, clowns and food follows from 11 a.m.
to 3 p.m. The fun continues at Mayo Farm
at 6 p.m., with fireworks at dusk. July 4, 10
a.m.-dark, various locations. Info, 253-7321.
gostowe.com

Milton

Montpelier

Newport

Rutland

North Hero

St. Albans

Sky bursts bloom after dark at a fireworks extravaganza in the middle of Lake Champlain.
July 3, park opens at 10 a.m. for swimming
and picnicking; fireworks at dusk, Knight
Point State Park. Info, 372-8400.
champlainislands.com

Bay Day begins with the Great Race, a 3.1mile run, 12-mile bike and 3-mile canoe race.
Town celebrations continue with live music
and a sparkling fireworks display at dusk.
July 6, 10 a.m.-dusk, St. Albans Bay Park.
Info, 524-2415. stalbanstown.com

Families get into the patriotic spirit with
a bike race and a Firecracker Fun Run. A
parade, kids activities and live music pave
the way for Friday’s fireworks at 9:30 p.m.
July 2, 6 p.m.; July 3, 6 p.m.; July 4, 10 a.m.,
various locations. Info, 879-9100.

Woodstock
Independence Day starts off on the right foot
with a road race and kids fun run, followed
by live music, a community cookout, a flag
ceremony and booming fireworks. July 4,
7:30 a.m.-dusk, various locations. Info, 4572500. unionarena.org
Old Vermont Fourth: Celebrate the Fourth
the old-fashioned way — with patriotic
speeches, wagon rides, ice-cream making
and a spelling bee. July 4, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.,
Billings Farm & Museum. $4-14; free for
kids under 3. Info, 457-2355.
billingsfarm.org m

class. No dance experience, partner or preregistration required,
just the desire to have fun! Drop
in any time and prepare for an
enjoyable workout. Location:
266 Pine St., Burlington. Info:
Victoria, 598-1077, info@
salsalina.com.
DSANTOS VT SALSA: Experience
the fun and excitement of
Burlington’s eclectic dance
community by learning salsa.
Trained by world famous dancer
Manuel Dos Santos, we teach
you how to dance to the music
and how to have a great time
on the dance floor! There is no
better time to start than now!
Mon. evenings: beginner class,
7-8 p.m.: intermediate, 8:159:15 p.m. Cost: $10/1-hr. class.
Location: North End Studios, 294
N. Winooski Ave., Burlington.
Info: Tyler Crandall, 598-9204,
crandalltyler@hotmail.com,
dsantosvt.com.
LEARN TO DANCE W/ A
PARTNER!: Come alone or come
with friends, but come out
and learn to dance! Beginning
classes repeat each month,
but intermediate classes vary
from month to month. As with
all of our programs, everyone is

Write & Perform Strong
Women: Where are the great
women’s roles in theater and
film? Why are we still struggling
with gender imbalance and
misrepresentation of female
characters? What choices do we
make as writers, directors and
actors that reinforce negative
female stereotypes? This workshop is aimed at learning how to
create and develop characters
who are complex, dynamic and
memorable women. Instructor:
Kathryn Blume. adults and teens
ages 16+. Tue., Jul. 8 & 15 & Fri.,
Jul. 11 & 18, 6-8 p.m. Cost: $95/
person. Location: Flynn Center
for the Performing Arts, 153 Main
St., Burlington. Info: 652-4548,
flynnarts.org.

herbs
WiSdom of the herbS
School: currently interviewing applicants for Wisdom of
the Herbs 2014 certification
Program, Jul. 26-27, aug. 23-24,
sep. 27-28, Oct. 25-26 and Nov.
8-9, 2014. learn to identify wild
herbaceous plants and shrubs
over three seasons. Prepare local
wild edibles and herbal home
remedies. Practice homesteading and primitive skills, food as
first medicine, and skillful use of
intentionality. experience profound connection and play with
Nature. Hands-on curriculum
includes herb walks, skill-building, sustainable harvesting and

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Newsstand for free at sevendaysvt.com.

CLASS PHOTOS + MORE INFO ONLINE SEVENDAYSVT.COM/CLASSES

classes
THE FOLLOWING CLASS LISTINGS ARE PAID
ADVERTISEMENTS. ANNOUNCE YOUR CLASS FOR AS
LITTLE AS $13.75/WEEK (INCLUDES SIX PHOTOS AND
UNLIMITED DESCRIPTION ONLINE). SUBMIT YOUR
CLASS AD AT SEVENDAYSVT.COM/POSTCLASS.

LEARN TO MEDITATE:
Through the practice
of sitting still and following
your breath as it goes out and
dissolves, you are connecting with your heart. By simply
letting yourself be, as you are,
you develop genuine sympathy
toward yourself. The Burlington
Shambhala Center offers
meditation as a path to discovering gentleness and wisdom.
Shambhala Cafe (meditation
and discussions) meets the
first Saturday of each month, 9
a.m.-noon. An open house (intro
to the center, short dharma talk
and socializing) is held on the
third Friday of each month, 7-9
p.m. Instruction: Sun. mornings, 9 a.m.-noon, or by appt.
Sessions: Tue. & Thu., noon-1
p.m., & Mon.-Thu., 6-7 p.m.
Location: Burlington Shambhala
Center, 187 S. Winooski Ave.,
Burlington. Info: 658-6795,
burlingtonshambhalactr.org.

SEVEN

DAYS 07.02.14-07.09.14

MEDITATIONS ON SIMPLICITY:
This class will introduce participants to a series of meditations
that can help them wrest control
of their identity from consumer
culture. Mon. beginning Jul. 7.
By donation. Location: Bassett
House, 173 N. Prospect St.,
Burlington. Info: Eric Garza,
881-8675, eric@howericlives.
com, howericlives.com/calendar/
simplicity.

TAIKO, DJEMBE & CONGAS!:
Stuart Paton, cofounder and artistic director of Burlington Taiko
Group, has devoted the past
25 years to performing and teaching
taiko to children
and adults here in
the Burlington area
and throughout New
England. He is currently the primary instructor
at the Burlington Taiko Space,
and his teaching style integrates
the best of what he experienced
as a child growing up in Tokyo
with many successful strategies
in American education. Call or
email for schedule. Location:
Burlington Taiko Space, 208
Flynn Ave., suite 3-G, Burlington
& Lane Shops Community Room,
13 N. Franklin St., Montpelier.
Info: Stuart Paton, 999-4255,
spaton55@gmail.com,
burlingtontaiko.org.

spirituality

yoga

HEALING HEART OF SUMMER:
Awaken to the Heart of Summer,
using shamanic journeying,
story, ceremony and, perhaps, a
walk in the park. Connect to the
majesty of the season and the
many beings and energies that
are now at their most exuberant and potent. Discover new
pathways to healing. Sat., Jul.
12, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Cost: $40/4hour workshop. Location:
JourneyWorks, 1205 North Ave.,
Burlington. Info: Michael Watson,
860-6203, mwatsonlcmhc@hotmail.com, journeyworksvt.com.

WORDS BY DAN BOLLES (ADAPTED FROM A TRUE STORY BY TOM BANJO)
ART BY TOM AZARIAN AKA TOM BANJO

A

“cranky show” is an old-timey form of entertainment in which hand-drawn images on a scroll are hand-cranked across a screen or small stage. These are typically
accompanied by a musician, who tells the story on the scrolls in song form. Tom Banjo — aka Tom Azarian — is the local master of the cranky show and can often
be found at Burlington’s Radio Bean cranking out humorous yarns, often based on popular folk tales, of runaway meatballs, stubborn mules and wayward cats. So
for our Cartoon Issue, we asked Tom to tell us a story from his own life … and then illustrate it. We then adapted his story in lyric form, in an attempt to re-create a cranky
show in print. Feel free to hum along.

Well, Farmer Joe was a mean old sot,
with a mouthful of chew and a soul full o’ rot.
Swearin’ an Spittin’ through the rows he’d glide,
lashin’ his old mare ‘til she nearly died.

62 MUSIC

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

When I was 12 my brother and me
worked on the farm pickin’ tobacco leaves.
On our knees, between the rows
pickin’ and pickin’ all summer we’d go.

One day, mean old Farmer Joe
reared up that poor horse aside our row.
From his snarlin’ mouth he spit a wad
and a brown ball of goo plopped on the sod.

Just then the tail lifted on the ol’ mare
and a brown ball come droppin’ outta there!
And on that day in ’47 in Western Mass,
‘Twas hard to tell - which was the horse’s ass!

s

undbites

Got muSic NEwS? dan@sevendaysvt.com

BY d AN BO L L e S

SCAN THeSe PAGeS
WITH THe LAYAR APP
TO WATCH vIdeOS
Of THe ARTISTS

www.highergroundmusic.com

See PAGe 9

Oh … Canada!

But you know what major city with
a dynamic music scene is really close?
(Hint: It’s Montréal.) Not only that, but
you could be in Ottawa in the time it
takes to drive to Boston. From there it’s
just a hop, skip and a jump to Toronto,
which is spitting distance from Detroit.
Mo
7
You see where I’m going with this?
KID KOALA
By easing the restrictions on touring
independent American bands, Canada
YOUR
SCANJULY
THIS PAGE
has just opened a whole new corridor
TEXT
WITH LAYAR
to Vermont-based artists that’s just as
104.7 THE POINT WELCOMES
HERE
SEE PAGE
We 5
accessible as the traditional Boston2
NYC-Philly circuit. And it’s made a
staggering number of venues available
to local bands a mere 90 minutes
ANDERS PARKER & CLOUD BADGE
away in one of the world’s great cities.
Previously, those clubs might as well
Fr
have been on the moon.
4
However, you’ll still have to smuggle
your DUI-saddled drummer in the
trunk.

for up-to-the-minute news abut the
local music scene, follow @Danbolles
on Twitter or read the Live Culture blog:
sevendaysvt.com/liveculture.

KING BUZZO
(OFEMMA
THERUTH
MELVINS)
RUNDLE

SEVEN DAYS

SOUNdBITeS

Su
6

07.02.14-07.09.14

I’ve been publicly harassing, er, urging
local psych-rock duo PourS to release
their debut record pretty much since
front man brYAN PArmELEE dissolved his
old band PArmAGA and teamed up with
ex-mAN mAN and SANtiGoLD drummer
chriS ShAr about two years ago. Mostly
that’s because I was a big fan of
Parmaga and, from what I’ve seen live,
Pours pick up where that band left off
and take Parmelee’s ethereal, popcentric compositions into even spacier
new territory. I like spacey.
I’m delighted to announce that Pours
are finally releasing that long-awaited
self-titled debut with a release show
at the Monkey House in Winooski this
Sunday, July 6, with Albuquerque’s You
— with whom Pours will immediately
head out on tour. And I gotta say, the
record is worth the wait.
Not to spoil the review, which
we’ll have in these pages in a couple
of weeks, but the new album suggests
an increasing musical maturity in
Parmelee. His songwriting has never
been better or more adventurous. He
retains the pop sensibility that made

SEVENDAYSVt.com

It’s Fourth of July week.
So in the midst of all
that flag-waving
patriotism, it only
makes sense that we
begin this week’s
column by talking
about Canada. Just
work with me, OK?
Historically, for an
American band to play in Canada,
it meant navigating a byzantine
gauntlet of wonky permits, confusing
regulations, sticky international
laws and charmingly funny accents.
Especially for independent artists
hailing from regions close to the U.S.Canada border, the payoff for gigging
in the Great White North was rarely
enough to justify the hassle. Regardless
of the exchange rate, shit pay is shit
pay in any country. Over the years,
I’ve heard numerous stories of local
bands — who shall remain nameless
so as not to alert homeland security —
employing all manner of shenanigans
to cross the border for gigs. One: telling
border agents the seven guitars, nine
amps, four groupies, drum set and
boxes of merch in the van were just for
playing at “a friend’s birthday party.”
Another: stowing band members with
questionable international legal status
in the car’s trunk. (Yes, really.)
The challenges of gigging in Canada
were made even more difficult last year,
when that country’s government altered
the regulations placed on non-Canadian
bands touring there. The legislation
created something called Labor Market
Opinion fees, which essentially made
playing in Canada financially impossible
for American artists not named LADY
GAGA or JAY-Z. In addition to the previous
temporary work permit fee of $150 per
individual band member or $450 per
band, the new regs added a whopping
$275 per individual. That meant a
singer-songwriter would have to lay
out $425 to play legit gigs north of the
border.
Doesn’t sound too crazy, right? Until
you realize that your average quartet
would pay more than $1,500. You can
do the math on an eight-member group
such as KAt wriGht & thE iNDomitAbLE
SouL bAND. Suffice it to say, that’s a lot
of loonies. Given that we’ve allowed

Canada to
molest our ears
with NicKELbAcK and
JuStiN biEbEr with
impunity, that
seemed like a raw
deal.
As it turns out, the
Canadian government
agrees. At least on the
excessive fees part.
We’re still waiting for an
official apology for
Nickelback and the Biebs. (Ed.
note: I’ll take your Nickelback and
Biebs and raise you one Leonard
Cohen and two McGarrigles. Or
Neil Young and Joni Mitchell. Oscar
Peterson and Diana Krall. K.d. lang and
Gordon Lightfoot. Or, hell, Drake and
Barenaked Ladies.)
Last week, Canada created an
exemption to the LMO fee for small
clubs and bars. This comes after the
original legislation had drawn strong
vocal opposition on both sides of the
border, including from organizations
such as the American Association of
Independent Music and the Canadian
Independent Music Association. A
petition to reverse the legislation on the
website Change.org scored more than
140,000 signatures.
But wait, there’s more.
In addition to the LMO exemption,
Canada also ditched the work permit
fee for touring musicians. That means
gigging in Canada is now easier than it’s
ever been, at least financially. And that’s
kind of a big deal.
Local bands have numerous
opportunities to reach local ears at
local clubs, but breaking out of the cozy
confines of the Green Mountains has
always been a challenge. The simple
fact is that Burlington is something of
an outpost, not particularly close to
any major American cities, let alone
touring circuits. Unlike bands from, say,
Brooklyn, who have dozens of cities in
which to play within a four-hour drive,
it takes a Burlington band that long just
to get to Boston. That makes touring
problematic.

6/30/14 10:55 AM

music

CLUB DATES
na: not availABLE. AA: All ages.

Snoop Dogg

courtesy of snoop dogg

Jazz Hands, Beeyatch! We bet when rapper

was

just coming up amid so much drama in the LBC, he never planned on one day headlining
the world’s largest jazz festival. For one thing, it’s kinda hard being Snoop J-A-doublezee. And yet the Doggfather will do just that at Métropolis this Friday, July 4, as part
of the 35th Festival International de Jazz de Montréal. But chill to the next episode,
hepcats, while you muthaf[PARENTAL ADVISORY]ers bounce to this: There’s still
plenty of actual jazz at the Montréal jazz fest, including the likes of Christian McBride,
Dianne Reeves, Ginger Baker, Keith Jarrett, Terence Blanchard and Tony Bennett, to name

a handful of the hundreds of performers of all genres, jazz and otherwise, who will play
the fest. The Montréal jazz fest began last week and runs through Sunday, July 6. For
more, visit montrealjazzfest.com.

Saturday, July 5. Why? Because true
freedom means you can celebrate
freedom whenever the hell you want to,
that’s why.
This year, the party is curated by the
cool kids from local booking collective
Friends + Family. The psych-popheavy lineup includes SECRET LOVER
from Worcester, Mass., Northampton’s
SAM GAS CAN, locals SUPER BONHEUR and
mysterious NYC pop-punk outfit
NANCY — not to be confused with the
Louisiana-based queer-punk band of
the same name.

Moving on to the festival beat, last
week the Skinny Pancake announced a
huge, three-day food-and-music festival
at Oakledge Park beginning Friday,
6 26 Myra Flynn
September 19, called Eat by Northeast.
Check out last week’s food news item by
W W W . P O S I T I V E P I E . C O M
Alice Levitt for the gustatory angle.
8 0 2 . 2 2 9 . 0 4 5 3
On the music tip, the fest features a
pretty remarkable lineup of local and
national bands, especially considering 8v-positivepie070214.indd 1
7/1/14 1:33 PM
the whole thing is free. Bands include
the HUG YOUR FARMER ALL-STAR BAND, the
An idea that is developed
FELICE BROTHERS, DANE ZANES, CABINET, the
and put into action is more
BURLINGTON BREAD BOYS, the BALLROOM
important than an idea that
exists only as an idea.
THIEVES, and JOSH PANDA & THE HOT DAMNED.
- Buddha

PLAINFIELD

Pours

backbone to Parmelee’s spidery
psychedelics. Nice work, guys.

Last but not least, a special thanks to

NEKO CASE for playing a show at the Flynn

In freedom news, the annual July 3rd
party at Burlington secondhand store
Speaking Volumes has been moved to

A peek at what was on my iPod,
turntable, eight-track player, etc., this
week.

07.02.14-07.09.14

COURTESY OF THE FELICE BROTHERS

F.7.4: SALSA with JAH RED 8PM
DJ ROBBIE J. 11PM

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

Parmaga so good while expanding his
sonic palette to create bold, albeit hazy,
new soundscapes.
On that score, Shar deserves credit,
too. His percussion work adds a
sophisticated aesthetic and rhythmic

7/1/14 3:34 PM

EMMY WILDWOOD Mean Love

sevendaysvt.com

MUSIC 65

The Felice Brothers

,

MASTODON Once More Round the Sun

music

CLUB DaTES
na: not availaBlE. aa: all agEs.

courTEsy of king buzzo

SCAN THIS PAGE
WITH LAYAR
SEE PAGE 5

YOUR
TEXT
SUn.06 // KInGHERE
BUzzo [PUnK]

Buzz Cuts

SCAN THIS PAGE
WITH LAYAR
SEE PAGE 5

KInG BUzzo, aka Roger “Buzz” Osborne, is the sole remaining founding member of seminal punk band the Melvins.

On his new solo album, This Machine Kills Artists, Osborne strips down, musically speaking, with a mostly acoustic record. Though
quieter than his work with the Melvins, songs such as “Dark Brown Teeth,” “Drunken Baby” and “How I Became Offensive” still exude
the winking, churlish charm and humor for which he’s become known. King Buzzo plays the Higher Ground Showcase Lounge in
South Burlington this Sunday, July 6, with songwriter Emma RUTH RUnDLE.
fri.4

“Toothbrush From Twig to Bristle,” Museum of Everyday Life, Glover. Through December 31. museumofeverydaylife.org

Art ShowS

Heritage Craft week
July 7-13

ArT EVENTS

burlington

FIrST FrIdAy ArT: Dozens of galleries and
other venues around the city open their doors
to pedestrian art viewers in this monthly event.
see Art Map burlington at participating locations.
burlington, first Friday of every month, 5-8 p.m.
info, 264-4839.

f ‘AmErIcAN PlAId’: A group exhibit of artwork
focused on color (mediums are immaterial),
creating a red, white and blue plaid motif on the
gallery walls. Reception and barbecue: Friday, July
4, 5-9 p.m. July 4-26. info, 578-2512. The s.p.A.C.E.
gallery in burlington.
f GrAzIEllA WEbEr-GrASSI: “who’s past?,” new

‘ArT, muSIc ANd TEA oN ISlE lA moTTE’:
Musician nadamayi shanti performs a memorial
concert to late local vocalist Monica baege in three
sets at 2, 3 and 4 p.m.; landscape paintings by
Vermont artist wendy soliday hang in the barn,
along with weaving, jewelry and works on paper
by ginger Johnson and watercolors by Fisk Farm
art director Maurie harrington. proceeds from the
sale of tea and snacks benefit the isle la Motte
preservation Trust. Fisk Farm Art Center, isle la
Motte, sunday, July 6, 1-5 p.m. info, 928-3364.
JEFF dANzIGEr: An exhibit, presentation and book
signing of the noted political cartoonist’s latest
book, The Conscience of a Cartoonist. Kellogghubbard library, Montpelier, wednesday, July 9,
6:30 p.m. info, 223-3338.
JoANNA SoKoloWSKA: A digital presentation by
the artist-in-residence, a classically trained sculptor from poland. The Carving studio & sculpture
Center gallery, west Rutland, wednesday, July 9, 7
p.m. info, 438-2097.

oNGoING SHoWS
burlington

f AlExANdEr AlExEIEFF: original 1929 signed
lithographs by the Russian artist Alexander
Alexeieff, exhibited with a looped screening of his
1930s animated pinboard films. Co-curated by
Cecile starr and susan smereka. Curator Cecile
starr shares stories of the artist and screens additional films, wednesday, July 9, 5-7 p.m. Through
August 26. info, 735-2542. new City galerie in
burlington.
‘AlTErEd booKS’: burlington high school show
works created from books, including a dress made
from a phone book. in the Main Reading Room.
Through July 15. lEo HINToN rETroSPEcTIVE: leo
hinton, born in bloomfield, Vt., in 1934, bounced
around foster homes as a child; in adulthood,
he was a barber, auctioneer and storeowner and
didn’t pursue drawing until he retired. This exhibit
includes his watercolors, acrylics and pen-and-ink
drawings made over the last few years. in the
pickering Room. Through July 30. info, 865-7211.
Fletcher Free library in burlington.

cArolE croSSmAN: oils and watercolors by the
award-winning Vermont artist. Through July 31.
info, 658-6400. American Red Cross in burlington.

cArolyN croTTy: Artwork in a variety of mediums
inspired by nature. Curated by sEAbA. Through
August 31. info, 862-9614. The pine street Deli in 12v-oldstonemuseum062514.indd 1
burlington.
dENIS VErSWEyVEld: paintings and sculpture
focused on the interplay of shape, composition
and texture in common still-life objects. Through
July 31. info, 862-1001. left bank home & garden in
burlington.
‘From our HEArTS ANd mINdS’: A group exhibit
of local artists in a variety of mediums. Through
August 29. info, 862-4584. st. paul’s Cathedral in
burlington.
‘ImPrESSIoNS’: Fran bull, Jordan Douglas and
Cameron schmitz explore in multiple media the
markings of humankind, from the ridge patterns on
fingers to trails on the landscape. Through July 20.
info, 865-7166. Vermont Metro gallery, bCA Center,
in burlington.
INNoVATIoN cENTEr GrouP SHoW: works by
brian sylvester, James Vogler, Kari Meyer, Kim
senior, longina smolinski, lyna lou nordstorm
and gabe Tempesta on the first floor; holly hauser,
Jacques burke, Jason Durocher, Cindy griffith,
Teresa Davis and Tom Merwin on the second
floor. Curated by sEAbA. Through August 31. info,
859-9222. The innovation Center of Vermont in
burlington.
JAcquES burKE: paintings, sculpture and digitally
enhanced photography from the Milton artist.
mArEVA mIllArc: Abstract paintings in oil,
acrylic, ink and mixed media. Curated by sEAbA.
Through August 31. info, 651-9692. VCAM studio in
burlington.
Jb WoodS: “walking in Vermont,” colorful
photographs curated by sEAbA. Through August
31. info, 658-6016. speeder & Earl’s: pine street in
burlington.

GARDEN

6/23/14 3:04 PM

SUNDAY, JULY 13 l 10 AM – 3 PM
$40/pp

18TH ANNUAL TOUR
IN WILLISTON
View six private gardens.
Afternoon tea included from 3 to 4 pm.
Purchase tickets early as the tour sells out! Tickets available
at FlynnTix, Gardener’s Supply in Burlington and Williston,
Lang Farm Nursery in Essex Junction, and Shelburne
Supermarket. Event is rain or shine.

For tickets and information:

802-863-5966 www.flynncenter.org
l

Sponsored by

Additional support from

‘A mAcAbrE KINd oF cuTE’: drawings and prints by
local artist Justin Atherton that explore the lighter
side of monsters, aliens and other creatures that
enjoy cupcakes.

Old Stone House museum,
109 Old Stone House rd.,
Brownington, Vt 05860
www.oldstonehousemuseum.org

SEVEN DAYS

f PETEr THomASHoW: “world of wonder,”
the second in a series of exhibits on collecting,
featuring collages and acquired pieces by the
Vermont physician, artist and musician. Curated
by Varujan boghosian. Reception: saturday, July 5,
5-7 p.m. July 2-August 24. info, 767-9670. big Town
gallery in Rochester.

NEW mEmbErS AT collEcTIVE: The cooperative gallery welcomes two new members with
a reception: blacksmith Chris Eaton and
photographer nobushi Fuji’i. Collective — the Art
of Craft, woodstock, saturday, July 5, 3-5 p.m. info,
457-1298.

For details and registration,
call (802)754-2022
or visit oldstonehousemuseum.org/
event-registration/

07.02.14-07.09.14

f ElVIrA PIEdrA: “To Earth, From heaven,”
photographic studies in three groups — the
peony tree, landscape and water — created over
13 years by the lunenburg artist. f EuGENIo
lEoN: “innovate, inspire, Aspire,” works from the
local mixed-media artist include upcycles in wood,
acrylic and straw; garden sculptures made from
recycled record albums, and more. Reception:
Thursday, July 3, 5-7 p.m. July 3-August 29. info,
888-1261. River Arts Center in Morrisville.

‘bEyoNd mEASurE’: A group show curated by
Carleen Zimbalatti features more than a dozen
artists who explore the role of geometry in their
artistic processes. Through August 31. info,
859-9222. sEAbA Center in burlington.

GAllEry IN THE GArdEN ExHIbIT & SIlENT
AucTIoN: “Minis for Morrill,” a silent auction of
4-by-4-inch paintings by regional and national
artists, including Ed Koren, David Macaulay and
many others, to benefit the museum. Justin Morrill
homestead, strafford, Friday, July 4, 5:30-7:30 p.m.
info, 765-4288.

ANN lAbErGE: “have a seat,” photographs and
sculpture focusing on chairs by the local artist.
Through July 31. info, 861-2340. Carshare Vermont
in burlington.

FLYN

NEW THIS WEEK

at tHe Old StOne HOuSe muSeum

art
BURLINGTON SHOWS

« P.71

‘American Plaid’

Sara Bridgman: A retrospective of works by the
Vermont artist. Through August 2. Info, 652-4500.
Amy E. Tarrant Gallery, Flynn Center, in Burlington.

Burlington’s First Friday art walk is a no-

go at many locations this week because it

Shelley Vermilya: “Up Close,” photographs by
the University of Vermont professor. Through July
17. Info, 862-8261. Flying Cloud at KSV in Burlington.

coincides with Independence Day. But the
show goes on at the S.P.A.C.E. Gallery on

artists in a red, white and blue plaid motif.
“This is a study on color only, with material

‘in a new light: FrenCh impreSSioniSm
arriVeS in ameriCa’: Paintings by Monet, Manet,
Degas and other French impressionist masters
from the museum’s permanent collection. Through
September 1. Info, 985-3346. Pizzagalli Center for
Art and Education, Shelburne Museum.

and subject matter becoming irrelevant,
though they may tie in to a broader view
of what the colors can represent,” writes
gallery owner Christy Mitchell. Swing by

with your own sparklers and foodstuffs to
grill; the casual hangout and celebration will
be 5 to 9 p.m. (In the Backspace Gallery, the

liBBy daVidSon: Fifty plein air watercolor
paintings the artist completed in a year for her
50th birthday. monoChromatiC exhiBit: A
group exhibit of local artists with a one-color focus.
Through July 31. Info, 879-1236. Artists’ Mediums
in Williston.

lorraine C. manley: “Summer in Vermont,” a
collection of acrylic paintings by the Milton artist.
Through July 31. Info, 862-5724. Lake Champlain
Access Television in Colchester.
maria Sengle: Illustrations with an aquatic life
theme by the industrial designer and winner of
Magic Hat’s Labels for Libations contest. Through
July 31. Info, 658-2739. The ArtSpace at the Magic
Hat Artifactory in South Burlington.

usual.) Both exhibits run through July 26.
Pictured: a montage of work by Alan Alejo,
Beth Robinson and Jeff Bruno.
‘perilouS pigeonS’: An exhibit of artworks
honoring the now-extinct passenger pigeon.
Through August 31. Info, 434-2167. Birds of Vermont
Museum in Huntington.
‘renaSCenCe’: Works by featured artist Barbara
Wagner and 17 others who explore the revival of
something that has been dormant. Through August
5. Info, 985-3848. Furchgott Sourdiffe Gallery in
Shelburne.
‘warm SeaSonS’: A group show in various
mediums by Jericho artists, and nonresident artists
whose work connects to the town. Through August
31. Info, 899-2974. Jericho Town Hall.

barre/montpelier

‘1864: Some SuFFer So muCh’: With objects,
photographs and ephemera, the exhibit examines
surgeons who treated Civil War soldiers on
battlefields and in three Vermont hospitals, and the
history of post-tramautic stress disorder. Through
December 31. arthur SChaller: “Billboard
Buildings,” an exhibit of original collages by the

College sociology professor Margaret Nelson.
Through October 15. Info, 828-2291. Vermont
History Museum in Montpelier.

amanda Franz: “Contours of the Space
Between,” paintings and sculpture by the Vermont
artist. Through July 9. Info, 426-3233. Plainfield
Community Center.

‘the drawing game’: Drawings by three generations of central Vermont’s Hecht family, which
has played a variation of the surrealist Exquisite
Corpse game for almost 70 years. Second Floor
Gallery. ‘VCFa at Spa’: Selected students in the
MFA program in graphic design at Vermont College
of Fine Arts exhibit recent work. Main Floor Gallery.
mark lorah: A mixed-media show exploring the
relationship between organized structure and
the need for irrational action. Third Floor Gallery.
Through July 12. Info, 479-7069. Studio Place Arts
in Barre.

Cindy griFFith, marCia hill & anne unangSt:
Three central Vermont artists display work inspired
by the area. Through July 31. Info, 229-4326. City
Center in Montpelier.
Corrina thurSton: Detailed pet portraits in
colored pencil, and graphite drawings. Through
August 3. Info, 223-1431. Tulsi Tea Room in
Montpelier.
daVid Smith: “Postcards From the Keys,” an
exhibit of paintings of Florida. Through July 12. Info,
426-3581. Jaquith Public Library in Marshfield.
diana mara henry: Black-and-white photographs of one-room schoolhouses in Vermont by
the famed photojournalist, with text by Middlebury

eVan ChiSmark: Detailed pen-and-ink renderings
of wildlife and whimsical illustrations of Vermont
culture by the Stowe artist. Through July 31. Info,
223-1151. Fresh Tracks Farm Vineyard & Winery in
Berlin.
katie grauer and niCole mandeVille:
Paintings by the two artists in the gallery’s first

Frank Woods: Recent paintings of barns, abstract landscapes and kimonos by the montpelier
artist. Through August 22. info, 461-5345. Lamoille
County Courthouse in hyde park.
‘in The sTudio WiTh Mary bryan’: The gallery
celebrates its 30th anniversary year with an
exhibit of more than 100 paintings in tempera,
watercolor, oil and collage by its namesake artist.
Through september 7. info, 644-5100. bryan
memorial Gallery in Jeffersonville.
kenT shaW: Night photography, featuring long
exposure time, by the local artist. Through July 2.
info, 888-1261. morrisville post office.
‘kick and gLide: VerMonT’s nordic ski Legacy’:
An exhibit celebrating all aspects of the sport,
including classic and skate skiing, Nordic combined,
biathlon, ski jumping, telemark, and back-country
skiing. Through october 13. info, 253-9911. vermont
ski and snowboard museum in stowe.

We are looking for volunteers ages 10 to 16
who have a weight problem.
Study is three visits and includes a physical exam, blood work
and brain MRI scan. Up to $180 in compensation.
Please contact brainsugar@uvm.edu, or call 802-656-3024 #2.
8h-UVMNursing-060414.indd 1

6/3/14 12:24 PM

Marie Lapré grabon: Charcoal drawings by the
vermont artist. Through July 9. info, 635-7423. The
Lovin’ Cup in Johnson.
nissa kauppiLa: Gouache and watercolor
paintings by the south burlington artist. Through
August 9. info, 253-8943. upstairs at west branch
in stowe.
WCAX.COM
WCAX.COM
mAd RiveR/wATeRbuRyshows

Six contemporary artists take viewers “on the road” in a new show at the Brattleboro
Museum, using various mediums to document the ways that cars and roads have altered
the American landscape. Los Angeles-based photographer Amy Stein made crosswaiting for roadside assistance “in an unfamiliar space between distress and relief,” she
writes. Gregory Thielker’s hyperrealistic paintings capture the view literally through
the windshield, with some images obscured by raindrops on the glass. Jeff Brouws, an

50% oﬀ All Biennials
including Hollyhocks
Lupines
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SEVEN DAYS

country road trips over five years to create “Stranded,” her portrait series of motorists

upstate New York photographer, explores roadside storage units as “monuments to our
culture of acquisition.” Work from Thelma Appel, Juanli Carrión and Letha Wilson
round out the exhibit; several companion exhibits, including a show of vintage car
Through October 26. Pictured: “Phil” by Amy Stein.

Only 4 miles from I-89 in beautiful Jericho, Vermont

ART 73

ads called “See the U.S.A. From Your Chevrolet,” are also on display at the museum.

ericA venuti & nicK Milburn: “Transitions,”
paintings drawing on mysticism, shamanism and
magic realism; and landscapes and scrap-wood
wall sculptures, respectively, by the married artists.
Through July 27. Info, brightflower79@gmail.com.
Room 007, Oakes Hall, Vermont Law School in
South Royalton.

‘Discovering coMMunity’: More than 100
documentary works from film to oral histories by
area K-12 students “exploring their own lives and
the world around them.” Through July 12. Info,
388-4964. Vermont Folklife Center in Middlebury.
gerMAn Art exhibit: The college celebrates its
German Language School with an exhibit of works
by German artists from its permanent collection.
MArtin PArr: “Life’s a Beach,” images by the
U.K.-based photographer and Magnum collective
member renowned for capturing people in their
comfort zones. Through August 10. Info, 443-3168.
Middlebury College Museum of Art.

f ‘lost gArDens of new englAnD’: An exhibit

of historic drawings, watercolors, photographs
and oil paintings that pay homage to the region’s
rich gardening history; and contemporary outdoor
sculptures by Norton Latourelle and Ethan
Bond-Watts. Talk with gallery director Bill Brooks
every Wednesday, noon to 1 p.m., through August
6. Through August 11. Info, 388-2117. Henry Sheldon
Museum of Vermont History in Middlebury.
M P lAnDis: Subtle, imaginative monoprints
inspired by Cape Cod; and an abstract, mixed-media
series created in Middlebury. Through July 12. Info,
989-9992. ZoneThree Gallery in Middlebury.
rAchAel robinson elMer: An exhibit of “Art
Lovers New York” fine-art postcards, now 100 years
old, by the late artist who was born at Rokeby.
Through October 26. Info, 877-3406. Rokeby
Museum in Ferrisburgh.

SEVENDAYSVt.com

f rebeccA KinKeAD: A new collection of colorful

07.02.14-07.09.14
SEVEN DAYS
74 ART

RT 100, WATERBURY CENTER
www.LakeChamplainChocolates.com

4v-lakechampchoc(icecream)05214.indd 1

display vibrant summer landscapes in

brattleboro area

contrasting styles in an exhibit titled
“Distinctions Between Color and Light”
at the West Branch Gallery in Stowe.
Mooney, a Vermont-based oil painter,
infuses representational New England
landscapes

the cArving stuDio & sculPture center’s
MeMbers’ show: An eclectic show with works in a
variety of wood and stone mediums by the studio’s
members. Through July 6. Info, 438-2097. The
Carving Studio & Sculpture Center Gallery in West
Rutland.

SOUTH END KITCHEN
716 PINE STREET, BURLINGTON

Two noteworthy New England painters

‘sierrA club wilDerness 50 exhibit’:
Photographs of Vermont and New Hampshire
wilderness areas and other outdoor scenes.
Through July 6. Free. Info, 359-5000. Vermont
Institute of Natural Science in Quechee.

oils, inspired by childhood summers in the great
outdoors, from the Ferrisburgh painter. Reception:
Friday, July 11, 5-7 p.m. Through July 31. Info,
458-0098. Edgewater Gallery in Middlebury.

bob burchess: “Portraits of the Interior,” figure
drawings and portraits by the Chittenden artist,
in a darkly surrealist style with Renaissance
roots. Through July 12. Info, 468-6052. Castleton
Downtown Gallery in Rutland.

65 CHURCH STREET, BURLINGTON

Craig Mooney
and Henry Isaacs

‘fArMs & fooD’ PhotogrAPhy exhibit:
Thematic images by 20 amateur photographers
in the gallery’s seventh annual contest, along
with work by professional photographer Lowell
Klock. Through July 25. eric DAviD lAxMAn &
PAt MusicK: “Pulsation,” sculpture in multiple
mediums by the Vermont artists. Through July 17.
Info, 775-0356. Chaffee Downtown Art Center in
Rutland.
‘florAl seDuctions’: A juried exhibit of more 70
sculptures, paintings, prints and photographs with
a floral theme. Through August 24. Info, 431-0204.
‘the roots of rocK AnD roll’: Artifacts from
clothing to records to vintage turntables illustrate
the early years of rock music, 1955 to 1964. Through
August 31. Info, 247-4295. Compass Music and Arts
Center in Brandon.

5/20/14 9:33 AM

‘the hAle street gAng: PortrAits in
writing’: Jack Rowell’s 12 black-and-white, largerthan-life photographs capture the elderly members
of a Randolph writing group led by Sara Tucker.
PhiliP goDenschwAger: Cartoon imagery
and interactive sculpture as social and political
commentary. Through October 10. Info, 885-3061.
The Great Hall in Springfield.

appear even more so when viewed next
to Isaacs’ dynamic landscapes.” Through
Sunset” by Mooney.

Don sunseri: A retrospective of the late West Glover
artist and founder of GRACE, an art program for
handicapped and elderly artists. Through July 12. Info,
563-2037. White Water Gallery in East Hardwick.

f ‘insectoPiA’: A group show with bugs made
of copper, felt, papier-mâché and other materials.
Reception: Saturday, July 12, 3-5 p.m. Through
August 9. Info, 748-0158. Northeast Kingdom
Artisans Guild Backroom Gallery in St. Johnsbury.
lois eby: Abstract works on panel by the Vermont
painter. Through July 7. Info, 525-3366. The Parker
Pie Co. in West Glover.
‘new voices, new visions: celebrAting A
sweet 16’: Fine art and contemporary craft including paintings by Terry Ekasala, Maurie Harrington,
Ben Barnes and Maureen Russell; sculptures by
Gampo Wickenheiser; collage by Ben Peberdy;
jewelry by Christina Lamb; pottery by Barbara
Lane; metal work by Lucian Avery; wood works by
Federico Viconi; and more. Through July 20. Info,
533-2045. Miller’s Thumb Gallery in Greensboro.
‘the golDen cAge’: Photographs with audio
interviews of Vermont migrant workers and dairy
farmers. Through September 6. Info, 334-1966. MAC
Center for the Arts Gallery in Newport.
‘toothbrush’: From “twig to bristle,” an exhibit
of artifacts and images detailing the history of
this expedient item. Through December 31. The
Museum of Everyday Life in Glover.

manchester/bennington

Angus Mccullough: “Humors,” an installation
consisting of two bodies of work by the multidisciplinary artist: “Bushes of Bennington County,”
photographs from an ongoing catalog that “search
for ideology in contemporary vernacular”; and

Art ShowS

call to
artists
artists organize and disorganize art Happening:
Call for performers, dancers,
writers — people who can
present temporal, experimental
work in this pop-up party
evening of performance events.
We’re also looking for a few
artists with T-shirt designs
for live silk-screening. Please
submit us images (think stencil
shapes) to oneartscollective@
gmail.com. ArtsRiot, Burlington,
Through July 10. Info,
oneartscollective@gmail.com.
creative competition: For
this monthly artist competition and exhibit, artists may
drop off one display-ready
piece in any medium and size
to Backspace Gallery, 266
Pine Street in Burlington,
between noon and 6 p.m.
on Wednesday, July 2, and
Thursday, July 3, and 9 a.m.
to 2 p.m. on Friday, July 4.
Entry $8. During the First
Friday reception, 5-9 p.m.,
viewers can vote on their
favorite work; the winning
artist takes home the
collective entry money. The
work remains on view for the
duration of the exhibit. More
info at spacegalleryvt.com.

inviting proposals For
solo and small group
sHows: Our second- and
third-floor galleries are used for
individual and smaller group
exhibits; now scheduling for
2015. To find out how to submit
a proposal, go to studioplacearts.com, click on “galleries”
and then “calls to artists.”
Deadline: July 11. Studio Place
Arts, Barre. Info, 479-7069.
‘a portrait oF vermont’
call to artists: Northern
Vermont Artists, show your
work depicting Vermonters
in our next exhibit at the
99 Gallery and Center in
downtown Newport. All media
welcome. Submit photos via
email to dpeel@vtlink.net by
August 10, or call 323-7759 for
more info. Please include a brief
statement of your thoughts on
the subject. The 99 Gallery and
Center, Newport. Info, 323-7759.
tHe ramble call to
artists: Artists living in
the Old North End, are you
interested in showing work
in neighborhood venues,
doing some live art making
outside or participating in
any other way in this July 26
community event? Please let
us know! To apply, email us
your plans or 1 to 3 images of
the work you wish to exhibit
and a three-to-five-sentence
explanation of your work and
yourself to oneartscollective@gmail.com. Deadline:
July 2. Various locations,
Burlington. Info, oneartscollective@gmail.com.

JULY 21-25, 2014 | RANDOLPH CENTER, VT | $400
Learn the history and biology of beekeeping; the threats, perils,
and diseases of bees; and the equipment necessary for keeping
bees in addition to honey processing and the marketing,
economics, and food safety aspects of honey production in
Vermont. This five-day course is taught by instructors from the
Vermont Beekeepers Association and can be taken for college
credit.

vergennes call to
artists: The monthly
downtown art walk seeks artists to show their works in local
galleries and businesses, the
third Thursday of every month
through October 16. Contact
info@creativespacegallery.org
or visit vergennesdowntown.
com/mainstreet/vergennesart-walk for details. Multiple
Locations, Vergennes,
weird science: Local artists
who would like to contribute
work to an exhibit titled
“Weird Science” can present
1-3 pieces expressing that
theme on Sunday, July 13, 11
a.m. to 2 p.m., for an exhibit
to run through August 30.
Pieces must be wired and
ready to hang; sculptures
must have pedestals. Art’s
Alive Gallery at Main Street
Landing’s Union Station,
Burlington. Info, artsalivevt
@yahoo.com.

materials. Through December 21. allan Houser:
Five sculptures by one of the best-known Native
American artists are installed outside the museum
in the Maffei Arts Plaza, representing his 3-D
work from 1986-1992. Through May 11, 2015. Info,
603-635-7423. Hood Museum, Dartmouth College,
in Hanover, N.H.
cHarlier Hunter, benjamin entner, robert
gold & carolyn sHattuck: Artwork in a variety
of mediums by the regional artists. Through July
16. Info, 603-448-3117. AVA Gallery and Art Center
in Lebanon, N.H.
‘Fabulous Fabergé, jeweller to tHe czars’:
The most important collection outside of Russia
includes some 240 precious decorative objects
designed for czars Alexander III and Nicholas II by
the jeweler Carl Fabergé. Through October 5. Info,
514-285-2000. ‘remarkable contemporary
jewellery’: Thirty Québec and international
designers showcase works that illustrate new
approaches and techniques to this wearable art
form. Through November 30. Info, 514-285-1600.
Montréal Museum of Fine Arts. m

Everyone deserves
safe drinking water

7/1/14 1:25 PM

A
46 GES
-64

Help us develop a vaccine against water-borne disease.
We are looking for healthy adults
aged 46-64 years.
4 outpatient visits and 2 follow up
phone calls over 6 months
Volunteers are eligible for up to
$275 in compensation
VACCINE TESTING CENTER
FOR MORE INFO, VISIT UVMVTC.ORG,
CALL 656-0013 OR EMAIL UVMVTC@UVM.EDU
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ART 75

‘evolving perspectives: HigHligHts From
tHe aFrican art collection’: An exhibition
of objects that marks the trajectory of the
collection’s development and pays tribute to
some of the people who shaped it. Through
December 20. ‘in residence: contemporary
artists at dartmoutH’: This exhibit celebrates
the school’s artist-in-residence program, which
began in 1931, and presents works by more than
80 international artists who have participated
in it since then. Through July 6. ‘tHe art oF
weapons’: Selections from the permanent African
collection represent a variety of overlapping
contexts, from combat to ceremony, regions and

SHORT COURSE

SEVEN DAYS

outside vermont

‘spirit animalz’: ONE
Arts Collective is accepting
applications for a monthlong
exhibition opening July 25
at Burlington Beer Company.
What is your spirit animal?
Work needs to be framed and
hang on the wall. Deadline:
July 1. Email 1-3 images of the
work you wish to exhibit and
a 3-5-sentence bio about
yourself and the piece to
oneartscollective@gmail.com.
Burlington Beer Company,
Williston. $25. Info, onearts
collective@gmail.com.

‘Finding a common
tHread’ call to artists:
Seeking 2-D and 3-D
contemporary fiber works
for an exhibit to launch in
September. Mixed media
acceptable. Submit up to four
digital images to janetensia@
gmail.com along with
dimensions and description
of work and artist statement.
Deadline: August 29. Jury
notification by September 3.
Chandler Gallery, Randolph,
Info, 730-6992.

PRIME TIME At nearly three hours, Bay’s latest may be movie history’s most
epic-length allegory for the war on terror to feature alien robots that can turn
into cars.

M

ichael Bay didn’t invent sequels, one-dimensional characters, laughable dialogue,
product placement or deafening, incomprehensible action sequences.
He’s just made them synonymous with summer movies. The guy’s an evil genius. Everybody knows these films suck, yet practically
everybody sees them anyway.
Transformers: Age of Extinction, the
fourth in Bay’s series inspired by Hasbro
toys, sucks a lot. It may be the crappiest
movie ever made. It’s so stupid and terrible
it makes even its good characters look bad.
This time those characters include, in addition to the giant contraptions, Oscar nominee Mark Wahlberg as the least convincing

inventor in cinematic history. He plays a
widower named Cade Yeager who divides
his time between building defective robots
in his Texas barn and telling his 17-year-old
daughter, Tessa (Nicola Peltz), that her cutoffs are too short.
Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf once played
the token humans in these films, but Fox
has gone on to establish herself as a credible screen performer (Passion Play, This Is
40), while LaBeouf has just gone nuts. Injecting an actor of Wahlberg’s pedigree into
the franchise is a credibility-boosting ploy
that does succeed. For most of the first five
minutes.
We meet Cade and sidekick Lucas (T.J.
Miller) as they root around a shuttered

movie house in search of retoolable detritus.
What the pair finds is the theater’s crotchety
owner. The scene is tailor-made for a commentary on the state of cinema, and, sure
enough, the old guy goes meta: “Movies nowadays,” he snarls (a spittoon would’ve been a
nice touch here). “Sequels and remakes — a
bunch of crap!” See what Bay did there? It’s
self-referential. Like 22 Jump Street, only
without the fun.
The pair also stumbles across a dusty semi
that’s inexplicably parked inside and turns
out to be Autobot leader Optimus Prime
(Peter Cullen). The plot: Though the Transformers have thrice saved the world, the CIA
has decided they’re “alien combatants” to be
hunted down and destroyed. Kelsey Grammer is kill-squad head Harold Attinger, a role
that — to put it kindly — he was not born to
play. Imagine Zero Dark Thirty with Frasier
in charge, and you get the picture. The film’s
bold statement about terrorism? It’s bad.
The Transformers are simultaneously
targeted by an alien robo-hitman called
Lockdown (Mark Ryan). The movie is only
165 minutes long, so it’d probably be too
much to expect Ehren Kruger’s script to
explain why any of these sinister cartoons
wants the part-time cars dead. It has bigger
fish to fry.

Or, rather, bigger crashes, explosions and
city-flattening battles with which to pummel
our senses. Cade and Tessa join forces with
the Transformers, and the chaos moves for
no reason from the Arctic to Texas to Chicago and, ultimately, to Hong Kong. Well, no
reason except filling Chinese theater seats.
Bay’s movies may be stupid, but he’s not.
Good luck making sense of the mayhem SCAN
— or, half the time, even making out which WITH L
hunk of metal is doing what to whom, much SEE PA
less why. Apart from the product placements
for everything from Bud Light to Chevrolet
to Samsung to Beats by Dre, the only thing
the director makes crystal clear is that the
climax sets the stage for further sequels even
now in the works. Thank God, a reason to get
up in the morning.
I’ll suggest a product that would’ve been
well placed in this film: Excedrin. Because
coming soon to a frontal lobe near you is the
mother of all migraines. Transfourmers, as I
like to call it, is everything you could want
in a big-budget tentpole, so long as what you
want is sound and fury signifying nothing
beyond a guarantee that more of the same is
already on the way.
RI C K KI S O N AK

REVIEWS

76 MOVIES

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSVT.COM

Obvious Child ★★★★

G

illian Robespierre has said that
she was inspired to write and
direct the short film that became Obvious Child by a spate
of romantic comedies in which a pregnant
heroine decides not to have an abortion. She
wanted to go where the makers of Juno and
Knocked Up would not, and viewers’ reactions to the finished product may depend, to
an extent, on how they feel about the breaking of that particular cinematic taboo.
But Obvious Child is not a message movie; expect no preaching about reproductive
rights or anything else. True to her claim that
she liked those mainstream rom coms, Robespierre has given her comedy the cheerful
vulgarity of a Judd Apatow flick and the
quirk-camouflaged romanticism of Juno or
Waitress.
Because most of that vulgarity emerges
from the mouth of the heroine, standup comedian Donna Stern (Jenny Slate), Obvious
Child is still a bit of a novelty. Don’t see it unless you’re comfortable with hearing a woman graphically discuss the state of her panties (hint: not clean) in the first five minutes.
Donna does that as part of her free-form
standup act, where she also makes relationship confessions that eventually send her
boyfriend into the arms of another woman.
Dumped, tanked and about to lose her job
at a Brooklyn bookstore, she hooks up with
a clean-cut Vermonter named Max (Jake
Lacy). (This movie offers yet more proof

that, for flatlanders, “WASP-y,” “wholesome”
and “Vermont” are synonymous.) The encounter Donna can barely remember leaves
her in an interesting condition: “I remember seeing the condom,” she tells her best
friend/Greek chorus (Gaby Hoffmann), “but
I can’t remember if it was on.” That pickle,
of course, complicates her tentative efforts to
build something real with Max.
Rather than presenting a radically original take on the rom com, Robespierre has
realized a thought experiment on film: How
would Knocked Up play from the perspective
of Seth Rogen’s female equivalent? Donna is
essentially the same confuzzled, immature
twentysomething we’ve seen on “Girls” and
in dozens of recent movie comedies (where
the character is more often a man-child).
Her character and storyline offer few surprises, but the writing is sharp, and the editing matches it.
Slate, a “Saturday Night Live” alumna
and the voice of YouTube sensation Marcel
the Shell, plays her role to the hilt, delivering her raunchy riffing in a wispy little voice
that’s alternately grating and adorable. She’s
like the live-wire, no-filter friend you can’t
stop hanging out with, though a whole afternoon with her makes you climb the walls.
Luckily, Obvious Child is less than 90
minutes long, and a decent number of those
minutes are funny or touching. The movie
will probably make Slate a star. I didn’t find
it as fresh as the similar female-written in-

BREAKUP GOGGLES A nasty split sends Slate into the arms of
a stranger in Robespierre’s comedy.

die comedies For a Good Time, Call… and In a
World…, but it’s telling that we can still count
points of comparison on one hand.
Recent years have seen the eclipse of
those pastel-cardigan rom coms where the
heroine’s biggest ambition is the perfect
wedding and her biggest vice is being uptight. But Hollywood doesn’t seem entirely
sure how to combine the traditional wishfulfillment aspects of the rom with a franker,
less genteel kind of com. Movies like this one
are working out that problem.

Will audiences embrace a heroine who
decides she likes a guy because he farts in
front of her? One who’s unabashedly more
than a little self-centered? While the abortion aspect of Obvious Child is getting the
press, that may be less daring in itself than
Donna’s tendency to own her choices — all of
them — without a single dithering apology.
MARGO T HARRI S O N

lampRecycle-Vermont-PrintAD-b&w-4.75x5.56-June14.pdf

1

5/14/2014

9:52:58 AM

moViE clipS

jersey boys

new in theaters
DEliVER US FRom EVil: director Scott derrickson
(Sinister, The Exorcism of Emily Rose) returns
with another gritty-looking horror flick, this one
about an urban cop (Eric bana) who teams up with
an exorcist to fight a wave of possession cases.
with Édgar Ramírez and Olivia Munn. (118 min, R.
capitol, Essex, Majestic, Palace, Sunset)
EARtH to EcHo: a group of kids find themselves
in communication with an alien who needs their
assistance in this family sci-fi adventure from
director dave green, making his feature debut. teo
halm, astro and Reese hartwig star. (91 min, Pg.
bijou, Essex, Majestic, Palace, Paramount, Sunset,
welden)
tAmmY: Melissa Mccarthy cowrote and stars in
this comedy as a woman in crisis who finds herself
on a road trip with her hard-to-handle grandma
(Susan Sarandon). with Kathy bates, allison
Janney and dan aykroyd. ben falcone directed. (96
min, R. bijou, capitol, Essex, Majestic, Palace, Roxy,
Sunset, welden)

22 JUmp StREEtHHHH1/2 In the sequel to the
hit comedy 21 Jump Street, cops channing tatum
and Jonah hill find themselves out of high school
and going undercover at college, where conflicting
interests pull them apart. with Ice cube. Phil lord
and christopher Miller returned as directors. (112
min, R)

tHE immigRANtHHHH James gray (Two Lovers)
directed this drama set in 1921 about a Polish
immigrant (Marion cotillard) who finds herself
forced into prostitution on the mean streets of
Manhattan. with Joaquin Phoenix and Jeremy
Renner. (120 min, R)
JERSEY BoYS 1/2 H clint Eastwood directed this
“musical biography” of 1960s hit makers the four
Seasons, dramatizing their humble Jersey origins,
their rise to fame and its consequences. with
christopher walken, John lloyd young and Erich
bergen. (134 min, R)

4t-nationalelectric060414.indd 1

6/2/14 12:48 PM

Got a case of the Fridays?
This summer join us in the alley at Red Square
every Friday for a FR E E summer concert.

A millioN WAYS to DiE iN tHE WEStHHHHH
writer-director Seth Macfarlane takes on the
western in this comedy in which he plays a
cowardly sheep farmer trying to work up the
courage to take on a gunslinger. charlize Theron
and liam neeson also star. (116 min, R)

NEigHBoRSHHHH Seth Rogen and Rose byrne
play a settled-down couple with a new baby who
find themselves fiercely defending their turf when
a hard-partying frat moves next door. Zac Efron
is their nemesis. nicholas Stoller (The Five-Year
Engagement) directed the raunchy comedy. (96
min, R)

RatIngS aSSIgnEd tO MOVIES nOt REVIEwEd
by Rick kiSoNAk OR mARgot HARRiSoN aRE
cOuRtESy Of MEtacRItIc.cOM, whIch aVERagES
ScORES gIVEn by thE cOuntRy’S MOSt wIdEly
REad MOVIE REVIEwERS.

To find the recycling location near you, go to
lamprecycle.org/vermont

mAlEFicENtHH Sleeping Beauty gets its obligatory filmic reimagining with angelina Jolie playing
the title ill-intentioned fairy and Elle fanning as
the princess she targets with her malicious curse.
with Sharlto copley, leslie Manville and Juno
temple. Visual effects veteran Robert Stromberg
makes his directorial debut. (97 min, Pg)

EDgE oF tomoRRoWHH tom cruise plays a
soldier battling aliens in a time loop, improving his
performance via do-overs that always seem to end
in his demise, in this sci-fi adventure from director
doug liman (The Bourne Identity). with Emily
blunt and brendan gleeson. (113 min, Pg-13)

H = refund, please
HH = could’ve been worse, but not a lot
HHH = has its moments; so-so
HHHH = smarter than the average bear
HHHHH = as good as it gets

cHEFHHHH1/2 foodie film alert! Jon favreau
wrote, directed and starred in this comedy about
a fine-dining chef who reinvents himself — and
reconnects with his family — by opening a food
truck. with Robert downey Jr., Emjay anthony and
Scarlett Johansson. (115 min, R)

HoW to tRAiN YoUR DRAgoN 2HHH1/2 five
years after the action of the first animated hit, a
young Viking and his beloved dragon discover a
cave holding a secret that puts them at the center
of new conflict. with the voice talents of Jay
baruchel, cate blanchett and gerard butler. dean
deblois again directed. (102 min, Pg)

Not only is it a good idea, it’s the law.

SEVENDAYSVt.com

now playing

tHE FAUlt iN oUR StARSHHHH two snarky teens
fall in love at their cancer support group in this
adaptation of John green’s best-selling ya novel
from director Josh boone (Stuck in Love). Shailene
woodley, ansel Elgort and nat wolff star. (125 min,
Pg-13)

Did you know you can
recycle your used compact fluorescent
bulbs and fluorescent tubes?

movies

LOCALtheaters

(*) = new this week in vermont. for up-to-date times visit sevendAysvt.COm/mOvies.

wednesday 2 — thursday 3
22 Jump Street
Edge of tomorrow
How to train Your Dragon 2
maleficent
A million Ways to
Die in the West
Neighbors
transformers: Age of Extinction
X-men: Days of Future Past
friday 4 — thursday 10
22 Jump Street
*Deliver Us From Evil
*Earth to Echo
Godzilla
How to train Your Dragon 2
*tammy
transformers: Age of Extinction
X-men: Days of Future Past

friday 4 — thursday 10
22 Jump Street
*Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
*Dawn of the Planet
of the Apes in 3D
*Deliver Us From Evil
*Earth to Echo
Edge of tomorrow
The Fault in our Stars
How to train Your Dragon 2
Jersey Boys
maleficent
*tammy
transformers: Age of Extinction
transformers: Age
of Extinction 3D

tHiNK liKE A mAN tooHH In this sequel to the
2012 hit comedy based on a self-help book, the
couples from the first movie head to a Vegas
wedding that leads, as cinematic Vegas jaunts
tend to do, to relationship-endangering shenanigans. With Kevin hart, Gabrielle Union and Wendi
McLendon-Covey. tim Story (Ride Along) directed.
(106 min, PG-13)
tRANSFoRmERS: AGE oF EXtiNctioN — The
fourth film in the toy-based saga of giant
shape-shifting anthropomorphized cyborgs
introduces a new human cast, with Mark Wahlberg
as an auto mechanic who discovers a deactivated
Optimus Prime and finds himself in trouble with
the government. With Nicola Peltz, Stanley tucci,
John Goodman’s voice and a boatload of computer
graphics. Michael Bay again directed. (165 min,
PG-13)

liKE FAtHER, liKE SoNHHHH hirokazu Koreeda
(I Wish) wrote and directed this tale of a father
who does everything he can to mold his son in
his likeness — only to discover that the child was
switched at birth and isn’t his. With Masaharu
Fukuyama and Machiko Ono. (122 min, NR)
tHE lUNcHBoXHHHH A Mumbai housewife forms
an unexpected relationship with an older man
when he accidentally receives the lunch delivery
she intended for her husband in this drama from
writer-director Ritesh Batra. Irrfan Khan and
Nimrat Kaur star. (105 min, PG)

12h-frontporch-070214.indd 1

6/30/14 12:27 PM

tHE UNKNoWN KNoWNHHHH In his latest
documentary, director Errol Morris tries to squeeze
deeper answers about the invasion of Iraq from
a not-so-cooperative donald Rumsfeld. (102 min,
PG-13)

X-mEN: DAYS oF FUtURE pAStHHH1/2 Bryan
Singer returns as director for this time-hopping
mutant extravaganza in which the X-Men join
forces with their younger selves to prevent
Something Really Bad from happening. With
Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, hugh Jackman,
Michael Fassbender, James McAvoy and Jennifer
Lawrence. (131 min, PG-13)

more movies!

8h-BigTownGallery070214.indd 1

7/1/14 4:08 PM

Film series, events and
festivals at venues other
than cinemas can be found
in the calendar section.

What I’M Watching
B Y EthAN d E SEI FE

makes transferring as easy as 1, 2, 3

Sign up for your
appointment today!

transfer to champlain college during one of our
Instant-Decision admission Days. meet with
one on our admissions counselors and know
immediately whether you have been admitted,
receive a preliminary transfer credit evaluation
and learn about what financial aid is available.

802.860.2727 or
admission@champlain.edu

For details visit:
champlain.edu/transfer-days

One career ago, I was a professor of film studies. I gave that up to move to Vermont and
write for Seven Days, but movies will always be my first love.
In this feature, published every Saturday on Live Culture, I write about the films I'm
currently watching, and connect them to film history and art.

sevendaysvt.com/liveculture

Say you saw
it in...

6/24/14 1:58 PM

NOW IN
sevendaysvt.com

3D!

MOVIES 79

Read theSe eaCh week On the LIVe CuLtuRe bLOg at

4t-champcollege062514.indd 1

SEVEN DAYS

World War Z reveals itself to be more than "just another zombie movie." Its smart use of editing
reveals that there's a pretty good storytelling brain driving this film. And, as we know, zombies like
BRAINNNNSSSSSS.

07.02.14-07.09.14

Instant-Decision Admission Days
Monday – Friday
1:00 - 4:00 p.m.

SEVENDAYSVt.com

This week I'm watching: World War Z

Instant-DecIsIon
aDmIssIon Days

fun stuff

Children of the atom Dave Lapp

more fun! straight dope (p.31),

crossword (p.c-5), & calcoku & sudoku (p.c-7)

Edie Everette
lulu eightball

80 fun stuff

SEVEN DAYS 07.02.14-07.09.14 SEVENDAYSvt.com

Sticks Angelica Michael Deforge

*

*

NEWS QUIRKs by roland sweet
Curses, Foiled Again

Police accused Jeremiah Scales of
selling synthetic marijuana from his
girlfriend’s house in Bloomington,
Ind., after a nearby sign announcing
“Drugs This Way” alerted them. “Our
detectives did some surveillance, as
well as some buys,” police Sgt. Pam
Gladish said, noting that comings
and goings at all hours stood out in
the otherwise quiet neighborhood.
(Indianapolis’s WTHR-TV)

Waste More, Tax More

The federal government spent more
than $3 million to buy eight patrol
boats for the Afghan police that were
never delivered, according to the
U.S Special Inspector General for
Afghanistan Reconstruction, because
U.S. and NATO forces decided they
didn’t need them. Four years later, the
boats, which cost taxpayers $325,000
more each than similar boats sold in
the United States, remain in storage
at a Virginia naval base. (Washington
Post)

Poop Scoop

Dennis Kneier resigned as mayor of
San Marino, Calif., after surveillance
video caught him tossing a bag of dog
feces on the walkway of neighbor
Philip Lao, a vocal critic of some of the
mayor’s proposals. In his letter of resignation, Kneier attributed his action
to “a lapse of judgment.” (Los Angeles’s
KCBS-TV)

Police arrested a Seattle woman who
tossed cat feces, frozen chicken parts
and a green liquid she identified as
“a natural drink” from her fifth-floor
apartment at participants and spectators for the Susan G. Komen Race for
the Cure. The “hail of garbage” hit at
least two people, said investigators,
who reported that the
unidentified woman told
them “she had worked a
long shift and was angry
that the runners had
woken her from her
slumber.” (Seattle Police
Department)

Mensa Rejects of
the Week

with an alligator should call the LDWF,
not try to handle it themselves. (Lake
Charles’s KPLC-TV)
An unidentified man had to be hospitalized for road rash and fractures after
he fell from a pickup truck onto an Interstate highway in Shreveport, La. He
told police he was riding
on top of a mattress and a
box spring to hold them
down because they weren’t
secured, but they suddenly
flew out, taking him with
them. Police pointed out
that it’s physically impossible for a human being to
hold down a mattress if
it goes airborne. (Shreveport’s KSLA-TV)

Police arrested
Nichole Reed
after she
was observed

stuffing
seven lobster
tails down
her pants.

Four men driving outside Sulphur, La., found
an 11-foot-long alligator
blocking the road. They
removed their shirts,
threw them on the gator’s
head and approached from
behind, intending to jump
on it. Suddenly, according to Glen Bonin, “it spun around and
grabbed my hand.” Bonin needed 80
stitches but kept his arm. “I’ve always
been the kind of guy who learns the
hard way,” he admitted, adding that
he hopes “with therapy, I’ll be able to
straighten out my ring finger and pinky
a little bit.” Officials of the Louisiana
Department of Wildlife and Fisheries
stressed that anyone coming in contact

Rescuers needed a
stretcher to carry a tourist
who hurt his ankle while
climbing one of Scotland’s
highest mountains in
his flip-flops. One of the
injured man’s companions
was barefoot; the other was wearing
sneakers. After the three men explained they wanted to reach the top
of Aonach Mor to experience snow
for the first time, John Stevenson,
leader of Lochaber Mountain Rescue
team, said, “We told them next time
they come back to Scotland to stand
on snow, they should wear something
more appropriate.” (BBC News)

Undercover Stories

German customs officials caught a man
they described as “elderly” arriving
from Luxembourg with four wads of
cash, totaling 194,400 euros ($264,773),
taped to his genitals. Travelers carrying more than 10,000 euros across
borders within the European Union
are required to declare the money.
(Germany’s Local)
Police arrested Nichole Reed, 30, after
she was observed stuffing seven lobster
tails down her pants at a supermarket
in Deland, Fla., and leaving without
paying. Reed told the arresting officer
she was going to trade the lobster tails
to a friend and possibly buy food at a
Chinese buffet. (Orlando Sentinel)

Success Breeds Failure

City buses in Saint John, New Brunswick, stopped offering free wireless
internet service to riders after it became so popular that the cost tripled.
“There started to be a pattern of abuse
develop, especially in the last six to
eight months, where we had a lot of
people streaming and downloading
very extensive files, and the usage got
very high,” Frank McCarey, general
manager of the Saint John Transit
Commission, said, explaining that WiFi costs jumped from $1,000 to $3,000
a month. “You like to offer things, just
as long as they’re not too expensive.”
(CBC News)

“I’ll meet you at the place near the thing where we went
that time to whack that guy.”

82 fun stuff

SEVEN DAYS 07.02.14-07.09.14 SEVENDAYSvt.com

Fran Krause

KAz

REAL fRee will astRology by rob brezsny
july 03-09

Cancer
(June 21-July 22)

The Venus de Milo is a famous
Greek statue that’s over 2,100
years old. Bigger than life size,
it depicts the goddess of love,
beauty and pleasure. Its current
home is the Louvre Museum in
Paris, but for hundreds of years
it was lost — buried underground
on the Greek island of Milos. In
1820, a farmer found it while
he was out digging on his land. I
foresee a comparable discovery
by you in the coming weeks,
Cancerian. You will uncover a
source of beauty, love or pleasure
— or perhaps all three — that has
been missing or forgotten for a
long time.

painter Ivan Albright (1897-1983) was a meticulous creator. He spent as much time as
necessary to get every detail right. An entire
day might go by as he worked to perfect one
square inch of a painting, and some of his
pieces took years to finish. When the task at
hand demanded intricate precision, he used
a brush composed of a single hair. That’s the
kind of attention to minutia I recommend for
you — not forever, but for the next few weeks.
be careful and conscientious as you build the
foundation that will allow you maximum freedom of movement later this year.

leo

(July 23-Aug. 22): According to an
ancient Greek myth, sisyphus keeps pushing
a boulder up a steep hill only to lose control
of it just before he reaches the top, watching
in dismay as it tumbles to the bottom. After
each failure, he lumbers back down to where
he started and makes another effort to roll it
up again — only to fail again. The myth says
he continues his futile attempts for all eternity. I’m happy to report, Leo, that there is an
important difference between your story and
that of sisyphus. Whereas you have tried and
tried and tried again to complete a certain
uphill task, you will not be forever frustrated.
In fact, I believe a breakthrough will come
soon, and success will finally be yours. Will
it be due to your gutsy determination or
your neurotic compulsion or both? It doesn’t
matter.

ViRgo

(Aug. 23-sept. 22): Many of
America’s founding fathers believed slavery was immoral, but they owned slaves
themselves and ordained the institution of
slavery in the u.s. Constitution. They didn’t
invent hypocrisy, of course, but theirs was
an especially tragic version. In comparison,

liBRa (sept. 23-oct. 22): In the last two
decades, seven Academy Award winners
have given thanks to God while accepting
their oscars. by contrast, 30 winners have
expressed their gratitude to film studio
executive Harvey Weinstein. Who would you
acknowledge as essential to your success,
Libra? What generous souls, loving animals,
departed helpers and spiritual beings have
contributed to your ability to thrive? now is
an excellent time to make a big deal out of
expressing your appreciation. for mysterious
reasons, doing so will enhance your luck and
increase your chances for future success.
scoRPio (oct. 23-nov. 21): you have per-

mission to compose an all-purpose excuse
note for yourself. If you’d like, you may also
forge my signature on it so you can tell everyone that your astrologer sanctified it. This
document will be ironclad and inviolable. It
will serve as a poetic license that abolishes
your guilt and remorse. It will authorize you
to slough off senseless duties, evade deadening requirements, escape small-minded
influences and expunge numbing habits.
even better, your extra-strength excuse note
will free you to seek out adventures you have
been denying yourself for no good reason.

sagittaRius (nov. 22-Dec. 21): In
the Inuktitut language spoken in northern
Canada, the term iminngernaveersaartunngortussaavunga means “I should try not
to become an alcoholic.” I encourage you to
have fun saying that a lot in the coming days.
Why? now is an excellent time to be playful
and light-hearted as you wage war against
any addictive tendencies you might have.
Whether it’s booze or gambling or abusive
relationships or anything else that tempts
you to act like an obsessive self-saboteur, you
have more power than usual to break its hold

on you — especially if you don’t take yourself
too seriously.

caPRicoRN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Percival
Lowell (1855-1916) was an influential astronomer who launched the exploration that
led to the discovery of Pluto. He also made
some big mistakes. Here’s one: Gazing at
Venus through his telescope, he swore he
saw spokes emanating from a central hub
on the planet’s surface. but we now know
that Venus is shrouded with such thick cloud
cover that no surface features are visible. so
what did Lowell see? Due to an anomaly in his
apparatus, the telescope projected shadows
from inside his eyes onto the image of Venus.
The “spokes” were actually the blood vessels
in his retinas. Let this example serve as a
cautionary tale for you in the coming weeks,
Capricorn. Don’t confuse what’s within you
with what’s outside you. If you can clearly discern the difference, your closest relationships
will experience healing breakthroughs.
aQuaRius (Jan. 20-feb. 18): “I believe in

getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.” so
said british writer G.K. Chesterton. now I’m
passing his advice on to you just in time for
the Purge and Purify Phase of your astrological cycle. In the coming weeks, you will generate good fortune for yourself whenever you
wash your own brain and absolve your own
heart and flush the shame out of your healthy
sexual feelings. As you proceed with this
work, it may expedite matters if you make a
conscious choice to undergo a trial by fire.

Pisces (feb. 19-March 20): “I awake in a

land where the lovers have seized power,”
writes Danish poet Morten sondergaard in
his fanciful poem “The Lovers.” “They have
introduced laws decreeing that orgasms
need never come to an end. roses function as
currency … The words ‘you’ and ‘I’ are now synonymous.” A world like the one he describes
is a fantasy, of course. It’s impossible. but I
predict that in the coming weeks you could
create conditions that have resemblances to
that utopia. so be audacious in your quest for
amorous bliss and convivial romance. Dare to
put love at the top of your priority list. And be
inventive!

Sterling College Open House
Meet with students, faculty, and staff; learn about our BA program
“This small college is one of the most important places in the country.”
—Bill McKibben, environmental activist and author

the hypocrisy that you express is mild.
nevertheless, working to minimize it is a
worthy task. And here’s the good news: you
are now in a position to become the zodiac’s
leader in minimizing your hypocrisy. of all the
signs, you can come closest to walking your
talk and practicing what you preach. so do it!
Aim to be a master of translating your ideals
into practical action.

SEVENDAYSVt.com

aRies (March 21-April 19): Would you like
your savings account to grow? Then deposit
money into in it on a consistent basis. Would
you like to feel good and have a lot of physical energy? eat healthy food, sleep as much
as you need to and exercise regularly. Do you
want people to see the best in you and give
you the benefit of the doubt? see the best
in them and give them the benefit of the
doubt. Would you love to accomplish your
most important goal? Decide what you want
more than anything else and focus on it with
relaxed intensity. yes, Aries, life really is that
simple — or at least it is right now. If you want
to attain interesting success, be a master of
the obvious.

to conduct jaunty experiments in mixing
and blending. Here’s what I propose: Let
your imagination run half-wild. be unpredictable as you play around with medleys and
hodgepodges and sweet unions. but don’t
be attached to the outcomes. some of your
research may lead to permanent arrangements, and some won’t. either result is fine.
your task is to enjoy the amusing bustle and
learn all you can from it.

Love to laugh!
In search of someone to spend time
with, to laugh until our sides hurt and
to make some great new memories.
Decided to take a chance and try
something new! If you love to laugh
and have a great sense of humor,
then that’s a great start and I’d love
to hear from you. Irish75, 39, l

For relationships, dates and flirts: dating.sevendaysvt.com

Women seeking Women

Feminine, outgoing, funny and
articulate
I enjoy quiet times, walking, the Burlington
Waterfront, funny movies and scary
movies, too. I’m looking for a soft butch
that knows how to treat a lady. Tuff
outside, soft inside. I am 45 years old but I
don’t feel, act or look it! I am originally from
Alabama — just a country girl learning
to love the city. LoveItOutdoors, 45, l
Happy Chance
I am an easygoing woman, though
I have been described as intense at
times. I would say “passionate.” Potato/
potato, ha ha. I practice and achieve
balance in my moment to moments
and love to challenge my heart to
expand beyond my current beliefs. I
love pottery. One of my jobs is working
in a ceramic studio. stargazing, 30, l
Honest, caring and Friendly
I am an honest, loyal, loving person.
Looking for someone to share life’s
adventures of skiing, mountain biking,
kayaking, hiking and more. Looking
for a long-term relationship, but
don’t want to take things too fast
or too slow. vtbeamergirl, 38, l

84 personals

SEVEN DAYS

07.02.14-07.09.14

SEVENDAYSvt.com

Whimsical artist seeking same
I’m a poet and yoga lover. When I picture
my partner, I see someone who fills me
with calm and wonder, who can engage
in flights of fancy but who also knows
when it’s time to rain ourselves in, for
I value groundedness and flight in
equal measure. Let’s create together:
I’ll write the lyrics, and you can write
the music. vocativecomma, 28, l
Just Your Average VT Chick
Smart, funny, busy with work, home
and parenting (most important
job!). Kind, honest, direct, don’t care
for drinking, smoking, drugs and
old enough to know better (seeking
same!). Like good conversation,
books, old movies, background music,
children, local food and living a happy,
peaceful life. RustyBrilliance, 38

Women seeking Men

Backcountry Lady
I am easy on the eyes, funny, artistic
and kind. I am an avid skier, preferably
in the backcountry. I love dancing,
singing, great food, and enjoying life
and nature. Always up for anything
fun. Looking for a happy, thoughtful,
honorable, motivated outdoor man
to go on whatever adventures life
may bring. empresszoe, 59, l
Something different
You are tall, patient, loud-ish,
understanding, obnoxious, responsible,
independent, thoughtful, active and
a healthy eater. I am loud, I’m mean,
impatient, vulgar, responsible, independent,
intimidating, grumpy and obnoxious, but
I’m sweet, caring, funny, lovable, loving and
I love to laugh. I’ll try almost anything once
and I’m always ready to go. Korvin, 34

girls just wanna have fun
Divorced mom of two grown kids looking
for friendship/dating. I am an easygoing,
good-natured woman who enjoys
anything from dinner and a movie to
just going for a nice ride through the
country. I am a hard worker, so please
no lazy asses. I am loyal and caring to
anyone who returns those qualities.
Humor is a plus. needafriend, 43
Oh, there you are!
I was hoping you were going to join
me on this lovely June weekend for
strawberry picking, pie making, kayaking
at the Waterbury Reservoir and dinner
with friends. Next time? nodnava, 51, l
positive, open-minded, sincere
Looking for good friends first and
open to anything that may follow. I
love my kids, nature, good company,
engaging conversations, cooking
for friends, learning new things (will
you teach me something new?). I’m
passionate about Energy Medicine
and hope to turn it into my real
profession soon. Open heart, curiosity,
warm personality and intelligence
are very attractive to me. Grrr8, 49
Pastoral romantic
A city girl turned country gal, with one
foot on pavement, the other in soil.
A Vermont journalist with travelin’
shoes. What keeps me going: close
friends, my Zen practice, hiking and
kayaking. I try to be honest in all
ways and do that inner work. If you
do too, let me know, as deep divers
are hard to find. ewetopia, 40, l

Curious?
You read Seven Days,
these people read
Seven Days — you
already have at least
one thing in common!

All the action is online.
Browse more than
2000 local singles with
profiles including photos,
voice messages, habits,
desires, views and more.
It’s free to place your
own profile online.
Don't worry, you'll be
in good company,

l

See photos of
this person online.

Smart, funny, passionate
Elementary school teacher looking
for some grown-ups to spend time
with! I love my job but am looking
for someone to spend time with.
I love spending time outdoors,
kayaking on a lake and exploring
new places. Looking for someone to
explore with me! megann31, 27, l
Happy, Smart, Sexy, International
Explorer
Attractive, college-educated, 5’5”,
blue-eyed, blonde nonsmoker,
moderate drinker, no drugs. I love
to travel, cook, entertain, a great
conversation, Caribbean sunshine
and warm ocean waves. I REALLY
love to dance salsa, merengue,
bachata. I teach dance movement
and am physically fit. Looking for an
independent, good-looking, intelligent,
fit man age 40 to 65 for dating and
possibly more. sunnyone, 49, l
Quiet. True. Loyal.
Honestly describe myself. I’m not sure
that one can actually do that with
complete honesty, but I’ll try. I have
two sides to my personality. I enjoy
people and company — especially
if you’re someone who can keep up
with my ping-ponging verbal style.
I hate to be lied to, even if the truth
breaks me down. I’m way too open
and trusting. Leigh75, 39, l
SwEEt. KiNd. CrEaTiVE.
Just moved back and I don’t know
many people on the East Coast
anymore. Hoping to find some
like-minded individuals closer to
home. UnsocialButterfly, 33, l
Let’s Get Off The Grid
College-educated country girl. My best
friend/love: let’s farm, grow, ride, fish,
prep, get off the grid ! Let’s read, learn,
talk, explore. Cherish our individuality
and relationship. Let’s laugh — lots!
Tip: never baited your own hook?We
probably won’t be a match. Know
what bag balm is, and used it like duct
tape (for everything!), we may have
a shot! CTVTCountry2012, 42, l
Free-Spirited Soul, Honest,
Laughter
I am a caring and affectionate person.
I love to laugh. I like to stay positive
and love life. I keep busy with the
gym, my house and flower gardening.
I enjoy nature, anything near water.
I am looking for someone who is
affectionate, honest, active, employed,
can share their feelings and are
romantic. Learn to enjoy the season
that you’re in. Midmorningriser, 52, l
New to Burlington
I’m hopeful to meet some nice
people, being new to the area. I love
skiing, running, mountain biking and
hiking. I have a little one who is my
everything. I hope to find someone
who makes me laugh and I can make
them happy too. I’m not complicated.
I love to have fun and enjoy the
company of nice people! JD, 41, l

Artistic mastermind
I’m pretty down-to-earth, artistic,
enjoy cooking, gardening, live music,
have a good sense of humor. I love
having friends over for guitar night and
BBQs. I enjoy camping and kayaking/
canoeing. I love the great outdoors.
I’m told I’m fun-loving. Will tell you
more if we chat. wmartin, 53, l
Hilarious, friendly, energetic
I’m a hardworking, friendly, energetic
person. I love live music, reading,
working out (YAY Crossfit!), spending
time with family and getting outdoors.
I am on the go a lot, but I love to
relax and chill. I love to laugh and
try new things. I want to explore
and expand my mind as much as
possible. iloveelephants12, 27, l
I’m a rare gem!
I’m ready to find someone to share life
with. Someone to count on and that
can count on me, too. Someone to
laugh and play with, cry and snuggle.
Someone willing to share every detail,
just because it’s in their nature. Honest
and kind, a nature lover. fieldfun, 37, l
Foxy Yoga Goddess Loving Life!
People of integrity, I want you in my
life! Required: passionate presence,
confidence, competence, excellent
foreplay skills and maybe even a
little romance! I want to go out on
dates and do activities with quality
people. I am awake, connected to the
Earth, passionate about movement,
self-motivated, self-actualized, fun,
flirty, confident and fierce ... and you
should be, too! FunFierceFox, 25, l

Men seeking Women

Just another “goofy” adventure
I’m a laid-back guy who enjoys the
company of good friends but also
treasures “me time.” I’m active to a fault,
sometimes putting play above work. I
have a great job and work hard, however
“I’m a work to live” soul. My dog and kids
are top priority. I’m looking to meet a
like-minded partner. sailnski, 47, l
shy guy looking for
companionship
I love nature, cooking, camping, fishing,
any warm-weather activities, although I
do hibernate in winter. Love to sit back,
have someone make you dinner and
watch a movie while cuddling on the
couch? I’m your guy. I don’t do bars, so
meeting people isn’t easy. I’m bad at
describing myself, but hit me up and I
can answer anything. mellowguy, 35
Imagining is the first step
Looking for a smart woman, 5’6” or
taller. Some attitude and sarcasm
OK and even desirable, but why do so
many women think “sassy” is an asset?
I used to be sort of a perfectionist but
have that under control these days
:-). Have worked abroad for several
years and speak those countries’
languages. I’m a lawyer, but also a
nice guy. MountainTiger14, 34, l

Let’s see what happens
Looking for a woman to have
fun with and start a family with.
Must be hwp. Mysugar, 36
Blue-Eyed Lady Killer!
Why, hello there! I’m looking for the
right woman. I love traveling and seeing
new things. I’m very outgoing and
kind of a comedian. I love summer and
like swimming, fishing and I’m a very
sensual person that loves to be touched.
Well, there’s a lot more, but you will have
to get to know me! 28andhot, 28, l
outdoor guy
Sophisticated hick with very diverse
interests, from bird hunting to
yoga. Looking for laid-back outdoor
woman who can have fun without
a motor. ran4646, 51, l
Passionate, Dorky and Musical
Blond and blue-eyed, I love new
things and excitement. My favorite
pastimes include hiking, gigging and
cooking. Fiery hair is my Kryptonite,
and an infectious, kinky smile warms
my heart. AllThatJazz, 19, l
Kindhearted skier, musician,
creative spirit
I work hard, I play hard. I’m tough as
nails and soft as silk. I have a heart of
gold. I’m patient and steady, strong
and kind. I’m creative, innovative and
gutsy. I’m honest and fair. Looking for
someone who is kind and fun, on a
similar wavelength physically, mentally,
emotionally and spiritually. Not too
much to ask, is it? balsamfir, 55, l
Doesn’t Fit Well In Boxes
I am a very open-minded person. I love
interesting conversations, eclectic
personalities, out-of-the-box thinkers
and anyone with a beautiful smile. I
value honesty, communication and
laughter most in a relationship. I’m
easily bored by bars and the head
games that people play. Show me
something real, and you’ve already
got me hooked. musicislove, 27, l
New Guy In Town
I’m 30 and just moved here from Florida.
Just a laid-back, pretty good-looking
guy trying to meet someone to explore
my new home state with. Stano, 30, l
Music Lover, Movie Lover, Book
Lover, Car Lover
I hold respect as the most
important thing in the world
besides sex. Wolfsbane5, 24, l
Looking again
I’m starting to look into dating again.
I enjoy being outdoors, especially
fishing. I ride a maxi scooter and enjoy
taking it on long rides around the state.
I’m a bit of a geek. I love astronomy
and spend evenings looking through
my telescopes. I a big “Doctor Who”
and “Star Trek” fan. SMCVT, 55, l

Men seeking Men

Gay guy looking for friends
New in town and seeking friends to hang
out with. I’m adventurous, open-minded
and easygoing. Interests include
hiking, movies, travel, cultural events,
flea markets, cards, history, politics,
etc. Looking for other single guys who
are available, well-balanced, have a
good sense of humor for friendship or
possibly more if chemistry is right. If this
sounds like you, let’s talk! gmforfun, 55

Ask At hena d r awn by Luke H ealy

For groups, bdsm, and kink:

dating.sevendaysvt.com

Women seeking?

Longing For Steamy Female
Intimacy
I’m 23, bisexual and ready to play. I’m
married to a man who understands my
sexuality and my needs; he is willing to
join but it’s not required. Looking for a
sexy, outgoing playmate for some NSA
fun (I’m very generous), maybe wrapping
things up with beers and video games.
Either way, the night won’t end on an
unfulfilled note. HotMomma, 23, l
Need more playtime
I’m looking for some more playtime.
Not getting what I need in the situation
I’m in. I’m ready to have fun and get
tortured a little. curious21, 25
Naughty Girl
Looking for a Dominant play partner
to help me learn about and explore
myself as a sexual being. I love being
sent to the corner to wait for my
punishment. I’m not really into leather,
but love lingerie and costumes. I love
role-playing. I want my boundaries
pushed. Please be sane, charming and
pro-condoms. ExploringBeauty, 30
Flexible. Fierce. Fox.
Wanted! People of integrity! I’m looking
for conscious connection and powerful
pleasure! Give me: passionate presence,
confidence, competence and excellent
foreplay skills! I love being touched
and enjoy sensual pursuits in various
forms. I am into urban tantra and wish to
learn and practice kink + bondage with
quality people. I value communication
and connection. FoxyAndFierce, 25, l

Naughty LocaL girLs
waNt to coNNect
with you

69

¢Min

Other seeking?

Want More Orgasms?
I’m a beautiful man, inside and out,
going through a divorce after 10 years
of marriage. I’m passionate for, and
quite skilled in, the art of the female
orgasm. I’m looking for a partner
interested in exploring orgasmic
meditation, or who simply wants more
orgasms. I also love to cook, dance,
hike, bike, camp, kayak, play tennis
or just hang out. morgasm, 46

Come get some
Looking for some real, good, regular
sex. Can’t seem to ever get it at home
unfortunately. Me: attractive white male,
6” long and thick penis, and use it well.
You: decent looking but not looking
for a supermodel. Thick is OK but not
too heavy. Prefer married, but not a
deal-breaker if single. Tubes tied would
be a plus :). Thanks. Needsome, 31

midlife desires
Married man with little or no sex
life looking for a little discreet
fun with like-minded female or
couple. chrissolo965, 51
Git me some
Lookin’ for some experiences
outside of my norm. Hulk, 37
Outdoor Playtime
Seeking a woman or cpl (m/w) for nude
sunbathing and outdoor erotic play.
Massage, exhibitionism and creativity
— you game? FuninVtMtns2, 49
save me
I would like to find a cute girl to fool
around with, as I feel I missed out on
a lot of fun times over the last few
years. Looking for anything at all, one
time or more! I am easygoing and into
nature, longboarding, power tools,
science, chilling, hiking, art, animals
and other stuff. cattlesteak, 22, l

18+

Hung Single Guy Seeks Fun
Hello there! I’m looking for fun and,
thus far, have been looking in all the
wrong places. I’m looking for that special
girl or couple that loves kink. Almost
nothing is too far. What are you looking
for? GuySeeksPartnerInCrime, 35

Oral Facial Worker
Looking for a girl that likes to visit the
oral surgeon on occasion for a work
over and facial pack. All colors and
shapes need apply! PhayShall, 45
Out For Fun
We live across the lake but travel
to Vt. frequently. We would love
to get her a girlfriend! Hope to
hear from you! Windancer, 32
Open-minded Sexy Couple
White, 44-52 yo m/f couple looking
for fun with others. She’s 5’5”, curvy
redhead with a firm rack. He’s 6’4, good
equipment, lasts a long time, wants the
ladies to be satisfied. We like a variety
of play: share, swap, watch. Threesomes
and foursomes are always welcome.
We can entertain and are laid-back. Try
us, you’ll like us. NaughtyinVT, 53, l
Hot wife
Hot wife mainly looking for hung single
males, but also interested in single
females and couples. es757us, 37, l
No holes barred
Professional, good shape, educated,
attractive, yada yada yada. Burlington
area couple looking for another couple
or woman of similar description
for fun. We’re new to this so take it
easy on us. No BBW’s or necrophilia.
Maybe once we’ve gotten used to this
whole scene and/or are extremely
drunk. We’re relatively adventurous,
definitely not vanilla. WWJDP, 37, l

Need advice?

You can send your own question to her at askathena@sevendaysvt.com

personals 85

brown latin wild horse
I’m a Latin ready to get some action.
Just got to town and seeking tons of
fun. Love music and arts. I’ll be happy
to take you places you’ve never been,
like paradise. latindude, 21, l

Doctor will see you now
Outgoing, fun-loving couple seeking a
female playmate to provide her with
some girl fun. We enjoy role playing,
light BDSM, getting rough from
time to time. She likes slim, pretty
girls to explore her body. He likes to
watch, and occasionally get in on the
action. We’re both in great shape,
exercise regularly and have LOTS of
imagination ;-). freshadventure, 28, l

SEVEN DAYS

Clean, Fit, Curious, Adventure
Seeker
Hey there pretty girl. I’m just curious
about having an amazing, sexy time
with a laid-back, clean, cute and fit girl
(or couple) like myself. Just a one-time
thing or FWB if we really rock each
other’s worlds. 420-fueled outdoor
adventures, followed by eating a smooth,
clean, pretty pussy is my ultimate
dream! Twenties, grad school education,
petite, fun! dwntwnskigrl, 29, l

3’s a party
Good-looking professional couple
looking for hot bi-woman to share our
first threesome. We are clean, diseasefree and expect the same. Looking to
have a safe, fun, breathtaking time.
Discretion a must. Llynnplay, 35, l

07.02.14-07.09.14

Come Dance with Me
Are you tired of the same old immature
alcoholic nicotine addict Neanderthals
Professional Dominatrix for Hire
who pass for men here in Vermont?
Serious clients need to fill out
If you’ve got the guts to be real and
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application on my website for session.
be seen as the divine being you know
Making fantasies come true in the
deep down inside you really are, then
upper valley. prodominatrix, 21, l
come dance. Looking for a tantra
partner to play and dance and laugh
KuriousKat
and love with. pleasuregiver, 53, l
I’m an attractive young woman who has
always been a good girl. Now I’m curious
To the next adventure!
in being naughtier. I’m a bit shy but
What good is life without a few
intrigued as to what I may find. Since
good stories to tell? I have a nice
I’m new to all of this, I need someone
collection, but it seems that it would
who can take charge but also take
be a shame to stop now. Who is ready
time to guide me patiently. Katt, 31
to have some fun? take_two, 42

BM/WF Kink pair seeks Curvy
Subslut
BDSM couple seeks a sexually
submissive woman who enjoys kinky,
dirty, nasty sex. We want you to spread,
kneel, moan, gasp, scream, plead and
beg as we restrain you, spread you
and fill all your holes for our pleasure.
You’ll be well-used and satisfied as
you submit, obey, serve and please.
You’ll cum often, repeatedly and
hard in service to us. Kinkpair, 30

SEVENDAYSvt.com

1-888-420-2223

Men seeking?

i Spy

If you’ve been
spied, go online
to contact your
admirer!

dating.sevendaysvt.com

Brunette Killing that Salmon DreSS
Friday: the Thrush, salmon-colored dress. We
smiled on your way out of the restroom. Didn’t
think saying hello was appropriate; you might
have been on a date. I thought about going
over and licking your face like a puppy, but,
again, probably not appropriate. Come back!
Sit with me at the bar. We’ll have fun making
fun of Richard. When: Wednesday, June 25,
2014. Where: the fabulous Vermont Thrush
restaurant. You: Woman. me: man. #912256

www.myvbj.com

no emo at nemBa feSt
From the guy with the blue shirt that matched
his bike at the Rocky Mountain truck: Let’s go for
a ride. When: Saturday, June 21, 2014. Where:
nemBa fest. You: Woman. me: man. #912254
Peace, loVe anD launDrY?
You: a blonde entering Radio Street Deli rocking
black pants with multicolored peace signs. I was
in a tan polo shirt doing laundry, talking with your
neighbor. I’ve given my number to your neighbor
before to pass on, but we’ve yet to connect.
Perhaps an I-Spy will catch your eye. When:
Thursday, June 26, 2014. Where: entering radio
Street Deli. You: Woman. me: man. #912253

SeVenDaYSVt.com

8v-vonbargens070214.indd 1

Yoga teacherS at cVoeo
You helped us get Farm-to-Family coupons and
commented that we were so positive for having
such low incomes. Thank you. Your smile is
7/1/14 9:27 AM magical. We felt like you saw into our souls. Keep
looking for us at the Winooski Farmers Market.
Lunch on us? When: monday, June 23, 2014.
Where: cVoeo. You: man. me: Woman. #912252
BlonDe goDDeSS on roller SKateS
Tuesday, 6/24, late morning at Ethan Allen
Homestead. I was just pulling out with my bike
on my car and you came rolling in with your big
orange dog to your black Subaru. I wanted to say
hello, but was too shy. Let me try again? When:
tuesday, June 24, 2014. Where: ethan allen
homestead. You: Woman. me: man. #912251

A healthy destination
to start a new romance,
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SeVen DaYS

one, two:
premiere
showing

PuSSYcat
Pussycat, we’ve already gone to sea; our pea-green
6/30/14 3:16 PMboat isn’t perfect, but I’ve packed some honey
and plenty of money. Won’t you sail away with
me? Like Owl and Pussycat, we are an odd couple,
but isn’t it amazing? I love you more than you
know. Xoxo. - Owl When: friday, June 20, 2014.
Where: life. You: Woman. me: man. #912249

citizen ciDer Bar, 6/24, 7iSh
To the brown-haired beauty talking to a friend:
Noticed you from the end of the bar. I had glasses
and a backwards hat. We both were invloved in
conversation. Your smile lit up the place. Care to
meet? When: tuesday, June 24, 2014. Where:
citizen cider. You: Woman. me: man. #912250

Vermont hiStorY exPo ,tunBriDge fair
You were sitting listening to a lecture at the Expo,
light-brown skin, incredible smile. I had on a green
baseball hat, escorting a group of elders around
the fair. I walked by your booth later and your smile
captivated me again. Want to meet up sometime
to talk history (or anything)? When: Sunday,
June 22, 2014. Where: Vermotn history expo,
tunbridge fair. You: Woman. me: man. #912247
gYm 6/22
You: white tee, black shorts with a red stripe
on the side, 6’3” or 6’4”, tan. Me: pink top, black
bottoms, pale and tattooed, about a foot shorter
than you. We were both in the zone, but seeing
you startled me out of it. Coffee sometime?
When: Sunday, June 22, 2014. Where: gym,
essex Jct.. You: man. me: Woman. #912245
“WiSe” BreaD guY, hannaforD, S. Burl
I look forward to running into you most Saturday
mornings at Hannaford in S. Burlington while you’re
stocking the bread. We smile and say hi. Today
you asked me how the shopping was going; what I
should have said was “it just got better.” ;). When:
Saturday, June 21, 2014. Where: hannaford, S.
Burlington. You: man. me: Woman. #912244
Something aBout mY WalK
You followed me to Splash on the waterfront.
Described how you felt about my walk. You
flattered me and made me laugh. You: 1979.
Me: 1968. It was your birthday and you are not
a farmer. Wish I had asked more questions.
Would like to try that again. Thank you. When:
friday, June 20, 2014. Where: Burlington
waterfront. You: man. me: Woman. #912242
loitering outSiDe ProhiBition Pig
You were standing on the corner outside
Prohibition Pig in an orange shirt and green/
white hat, and I’m pretty sure we locked eyes as
I drove by in a red Ford Ranger. You appeared
to be waiting on someone, and I hope you
weren’t getting stood up - if so, I’d meet you
for a drink sometime! When: Thursday, June
19, 2014. Where: outside Prohibition Pig,
Waterbury. You: man. me: Woman. #912241
Beautiful Women arounD St. alBanS
Brown-haired bombshell with red car. I have
seen you around, working with strange people.
I drive a truck and wink and wave as frequently
as I see you. Really want to bring you to pickle
park and give you a mustache ride you will
never forget. Hope you will give as much as you
receive. When: Sunday, may 18, 2014. Where:
St. albans. You: Woman. me: man. #912240
DJ from colcheSter (on zooSK)
I saw your profile on Zoosk and sent a wink.
When you sent a message, I tried to open an
account but was not successful. I’d like to chat.
When: monday, June 16, 2014. Where: online
zoosk. You: Woman. me: man. #912239
maintaining ProfeSSionaliSm
You are hypnotic walking down the hall in
that little black sundress! When: tuesday,
June 17, 2014. Where: always at work.
You: Woman. me: man. #912238

WhereVer You are anD alWaYS
Camping, biking, running, drinking, biking,
camping. I spy you often, but my heart aches
whenever we are apart. I’d rather you spy me
falling over on my bike than not at all. You make
me laugh and feel and love like no other. You
run around in my head all day and night. IMU.
ILU. I Spy you. When: Saturday, June 14, 2014.
Where: Stowe. You: Woman. me: man. #912237
are You aSian?
I was waiting for a cab by Mr. Mikes on Friday
night. Out of the blue you asked if I was Asian.
That’s one way to start a conversation. Maybe
you would like to continue having one over
drinks. When: friday, June 13, 2014. Where:
mr. mikes. You: Woman. me: man. #912236
Beautiful aSian Woman at Water machine
I helped you out with your first water-machine
experience at City Market on Sunday, 6-15-14
at 4:15 p.m. You wore glasses, had a dark red
shoulder bag and were in jeans. We waved bye
in the parking lot. You expressed interest in low
environmental impact. I like your intent. Want
to meet over coffee, tea or clean drinking water?
When: Sunday, June 15, 2014. Where: city market
water machine. You: Woman. me: man. #912235
halflounge SaturDaY night
You were so sexy dancing with your friend. I
couldn’t take my eyes off you. I wish I could’ve
joined. Felt your body against me. I was the
guy sitting in the corner by myself, resting my
broken foot. Hit me up if you were interested,
too. When: Saturday, June 14, 2014. Where:
halflounge. You: man. me: man. #912234
Pee in an inDoor Plant
You had an “Eat More Kale” shirt on. I was
hungover. It was hot and the snow was melting,
we laughed all day. I love you forever friend.
Will you marry me if we are 50 and still single?
I will make you smoothies if you read me the
paper. When: monday, april 14, 2014. Where:
Killington. You: Woman. me: Woman. #912233
muStachioeD laDY to meDicine man
You should be ashamed. We did not have wonderful
conversation at Spielpalast. I yelled at you like
a bear. This is all. You lie to yourself and all of
Berlin-ton. Why do you? If I find you, I put you
in gulag. You may contact me for punishment.
When: Saturday, may 17, 2014. Where: did not
see; he is a liar. You: man. me: Woman. #912232
BiKe Path after rain Storm
It was just after the rain stopped. I was riding
with a friend and we passed you on the bike path
on our way to North Beach. You were on your
bike as well, dark olive skin and dark hair. We
made eye contact and I lost my breath. When:
friday, June 13, 2014. Where: bike path by
north Beach. You: Woman. me: man. #912231

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