CHAPTER 40 Describes how, by striving always to walk in
the love and fear of God, we shall travel safely amid all
these temptations.

Show us, then, O our good Master, some way in which we may
live through this most dangerous warfare without frequent
surprise. The best way that we can do this, daughters, is to
use the love and fear given us by His Majesty. For love will
make us quicken our steps, while fear will make us look where
we are setting our feet so that we shall not fall on a road
where there are so many obstacles. Along that road all living
creatures must pass, and if we have these two things we shall
certainly not be deceived.

You will ask me how you can tell if you really have these two
very, very great virtues. 137137Lit.:
“these two virtues, so great, so great.”You are
right to ask, for we can never be quite definite and certain
about it; if we were sure that we possessed love, we should be
sure that we were in a state of grace. But you know, sisters,
there are some indications which are in no way secret but so
evident that even a blind man, as people say, could see them.
You may not wish to heed them, but they cry so loud for notice
that they make quite an uproar, for there are not many who
possess them to the point of perfection and thus they are the
more readily noticed. Love and fear of God! These are two
strong castles whence we can wage war on the world and on the
devils.

Those who really love God love all good, seek all good, help
forward all good, praise all good, and invariably join forces
with good men and help and defend them. They love only truth
and things worthy of love. Do you think it possible that
anyone who really and truly loves God can love vanities,
riches, worldly pleasures or honours? Can he engage in strife
or feel envy? No; for his only desire is to please the
Beloved. Such persons die with longing for Him to love them
and so they will give their lives to learn how they may please
Him better. Will they hide their love? No: if their love for
God is genuine love they cannot. Why, think of Saint Paul or
the Magdalen. One of these—Saint Paul—found in three
days that he was sick with love. The Magdalen discovered this
on the very first day. And how certain of it they were! For
there are degrees of love for God, which shows itself in
proportion to its strength. If there is little of it, it shows
itself but little; if there is much, it shows itself a great
deal. But it always shows itself, whether little or much,
provided it is real love for God.

But to come to what we are chiefly treating of now—the
deceptions and illusions practised against contemplatives by
the devil—such souls have no little love; for had they not
a great deal they would not be contemplatives, and so their
love shows itself plainly and in many ways. Being a great
fire, it cannot fail to give out a very bright light. If they
have not much love, they should proceed with many misgivings
and realize that they have great cause for fear; and they
should try to find out what is wrong with them, say their
prayers, walk in humility and beseech the Lord not to lead
them into temptation, into which, I fear, they will certainly
fall unless they bear this sign. But if they walk humbly and
strive to discover the truth and do as their confessor bids
them and tell him the plain truth, then the Lord is faithful,
and, as has been said, by using the very means with which he
had thought to give them death, the devil will give them life,
with however many fantasies and illusions he tries to deceive
them. If they submit to the teaching of the Church, they
need not fear; whatever fantasies and illusions the devil
may invent, he will at once betray his presence.

But if you feel this love for God which I have spoken of, and
the fear which I shall now describe, you may go on your way
with happiness and tranquillity. In order to disturb the soul
and keep it from enjoying these great blessings, the devil
will suggest to it a thousand false fears and will persuade
other people to do the same; for if he cannot win souls he
will at least try to make them lose something, and among the
losers will be those who might have gained greatly had they
believed that such great favours, bestowed upon so miserable
a creature, come from God, and that it is possible for them to
be thus bestowed, for sometimes we seem to forget His past
mercies.

Do you suppose that it is of little use to the devil to
suggest these fears? No, it is most useful to him, for there
are two well-known ways in which he can make use of
this means to harm us, to say nothing of others.
First, he can make those who listen to him fearful of engaging
in prayer, because they think that they will be deceived.
Secondly, he can dissuade many from approaching God who, as
I have said, see that He is so good that He will hold intimate
converse with sinners. Many such souls think that He will
treat them in the same way, and they are right: I myself know
certain persons inspired in this way who began the habit of
prayer and in a short time became truly devout and received
great favours from the Lord.

Therefore, sisters, when you see someone to whom the Lord is
granting these favours, praise Him fervently, yet do not
imagine that she is safe, but aid her with more prayer, for no
one can be safe in this life amid the engulfing dangers of
this stormy sea. Wherever this love is, then, you will not
fail to recognize it; I do not know how it could be concealed.
For they say that it is impossible for us to hide our love
even for creatures, and that, the more we try to conceal it,
the more clearly is it revealed. And yet this is so worthless
that it hardly deserves the name of love, for it is founded
upon nothing at all: it is loathsome, indeed, to make this
comparison. How, then, could a love like God’s be
concealed—so strong, so righteous, continually increasing,
never seeing cause for ceasing to manifest itself, and resting
upon the firm foundation of the love which is its reward? As
to the reality of this reward there can be no doubt, for it is
manifest in Our Lord’s great sorrows, His trials, the shedding
of His blood and even the loss of His life. Certainly, then,
there is no doubt as to this love. It is indeed love, and
deserves that name, of which worldly vanities have robbed
it. God help me! How different must the one love be
from the other to those who have experience of both!

May His Majesty be pleased to grant us to experience
this before He takes us from this life, for it will be a great
thing at the hour of death, when we are going we know not
whither, to realize that we shall be judged by One
Whom we have loved above all things, and with a passion
that makes us entirely forget ourselves. Once our
debts have been paid we shall be able to walls in safety. We
shall not be going into a foreign land, but into our own
country, for it belongs to Him Whom we have loved so truly and
Who Himself loves us. For this love of His, besides its
other properties, is better than all earthly affection in
that, if we love Him, we are quite sure that He loves us
too. Remember, my daughters, the greatness of the gain
which comes from this love, and of our loss if we do not
possess it, for in that case we shall be delivered into the
hands of the tempter, hands so cruel and so hostile to all
that is good, and so friendly to all that is evil.

What will become of the poor soul when it falls into these
hands after emerging from all the pains and trials of death?
How little rest it will have! How it will be torn as it goes
down to hell! What swarms and varieties of serpents it will
meet! How dreadful is that place! How miserable that lodging!
Why, a pampered person (and most of those who go to hell are
that) can hardly bear to spend a single night in a bad inn:
what, then, will be the feelings of that wretched soul when it
is condemned to such an inn as this and has to spend eternity
there? 138138Lit.: “to an inn for ever,
ever, for eternity.” The repetition of “ever”
(siempre) reminds one of the famous reminiscence
of St. Teresa’s childhood, to be found in her
Life, Chap. I.Let us not try to pamper
ourselves, daughters. We are quite well off here: there is
only a single night for us to spend in this bad inn. Let us
praise God and strive to do penance in this life. How sweet
will be the death of those who have done penance for all their
sins and have not to go to purgatory! It may be that they will
begin to enjoy glory even in this world, and will know no
fear, but only peace.

Even if we do not attain to this, sisters, let us beseech God
that, if in due course we must suffer these pains, it may be
with a hope of emerging from them. Then we shall suffer them
willingly and lose neither the friendship nor the grace of
God. May He grant us these in this life so that we may not
unwittingly fall into temptation.