Judgement

There are many ways that judgements are made and we are not always aware that we are making them. In simple terms a judgement is a fixed idea about the world. As soon as you stop allowing the possibility for change you have separated yourself from your spiritual aspect and denying yourself an experience of joy. Nothing is fixed, there is always the possibility of variables and always the possibility for change and we best experience that by accepting that others have a unique point of view that is different to our own and equally valid.

A friend (Kate) had tea with us a couple of weeks ago and told the story of how someone close to her (Mary) had not shared a problem. She was upset by this and asked Mary why she had not come to her. Mary replied that she didn’t want to feel her judgement. Kate, in telling the story went onto say, well I’m just telling it like it is, I’m not judging. This is a great example of how we don’t realise what we do when it comes to making judgements about the world. Especially in the helping of a friend. Mary didn’t want or need to be told the way it is, she just wanted someone to see her point of view as valid and be understanding of her pain in the moment.

Yes we form ideas about the world, yes we learn and develop from those ideas, however, never assume that they are finite and need to be taught to others. Rather let people come to you are ask you about your ideas as part of their own learning path and when they are ready to, if they accept or reject them, it is for them to decide, what is more important is that you have had the opportunity to learn and grow from their asking.