Puerto Vallarta is on the same longitude as Denver, which is squarely in the Mountain Time Zone. Puerto Vallarta is on Central Time. Por que̒? No se.

Puerto Vallarta shares the beaches of Banderas Bay with its neighbor state to the north, Nayarit. Nayarit is officially in the Mountain Time Zone.

But all of Nayarit’s coastal resort towns within an hour’s drive of Puerto Vallarta are in Central Time. Por que̒? Because Puerto Vallarta is.

So tourists won’t miss return flights, everybody within a stone’s throw of PV and its airport agreed to synchronize their watches. But watches are superfluous anyway in a Pacific paradise where mañana doesn’t mean “tomorrow.” It means, “In due course.”

Even the sun takes its time, delayed a few minutes after official sunrise. Before it can break the day on Vallarta’s beaches it must climb the Sierra Madres looming behind the coastal resorts. Sunshine, too, arrives in due course. 300 days a year.

2. Banderas Bay’s Bogus Boast

PV is on the innermost beaches of Banderas Bay with a coastline of 62 miles. Locals and tour guides boast it is the largest bay in Mexico but that is fake news. There are at least 3 larger Mexican bays. But we can all agree that Banderas is a fine big bay. And since Puerto Vallarta is on the same latitude as Hawaii, the water temperature is the same.

The Bay is deep enough for snowbird whales to frolic as do the big game fish that live way, way down. Olive Ridley, Green and Hawksbill turtles all nest on local beaches.

At the south end of the bay the Sierra Madres are so steep that if the slope was perfectly smooth, you could roll a bowling ball down a 45 degree angle for 2,000 feet before it would hit the water and roll another 3,000 feet to the sea bottom.

3. Note to Spain: Thanks for the Guitars!

Round about the time Paul Revere was still making silver gravy boats, Mariachi music was born, here in the Mexican Pacific coast state of Jalisco. Two centuries earlier the Spaniards had arrived in Mexico, bringing with them forced religious conversion, disease, death and Aztec cultural genocide. On the upside, they brought the string and horn sections!

The indigenous musicians who played flutes, conch shells, rattles and drums at pre-Columbian dance parties totally dug the brass and stringed instruments. And they embraced the Spanish concept of the musical ensemble. When the musical tools made their way into the hands of the Pacific peasants, the locals east of Puerto Vallarta enthusiastically adapted their regional rhythms to their new instruments.

Mariachis first dressed in white, then adopted the stylin’ cowboy outfits of Jalisco Charros with their embroidered jackets, wide sombreros and tight pants. Mariachis appear all over Puerto Vallarta and embroidered vests abound September 14 on Dia De Charro—Cowboy Day!

4. Scandal Made PV Sexy

American travelers caught wind of Puerto Vallarta as a desirable destination when they were bombarded with celebrity gossip (shocking!) detailing the affair between Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton as Burton starred in the John Huston movie filming here: Night of the Iguana. The sensational headlines and movie scenery put the town solidly on the U.S. tourist map.

Casa Kimberly, Liz and Dick’s love nest, was rented by John Huston but given to the famous stars when Dick threatened to quit the movie over roaches in their hotel. Richard bought it as a gift to Elizabeth just before their wedding and later tore down a house across the street and built a man-cave guest and pool house and linked the two with a Venice-style bridge. Neighbors called the second house “The Dog House,” for the times when Liz periodically banished Dick across the bridge after one of their celebrated fights. Casa Kimberly was built for $5,000 in the ‘50s and in 1990 sold for $450,000. It was later made into a luxury hotel.

5. Before the Age of Discovery Discovered Mexico, Locals here Discovered Lobster

PV restaurants get their fresh spiny lobsters (which come in red, blue and green) from lobster cooperatives on coastal Nayarit just to the north because Banderas Bay is too deep for the way they are caught by small operators.

Most lobster for local consumption is caught in shallow water by fishermen free-diving and catching them by hand or in hoop nets. The catch is mostly Langosta Roja which can grow up to 2 feet long and weigh up to 16 pounds. Smaller Langosta Azul and Langosta Verde live here, too.

Lobster-hunting gear includes a 16 foot fiberglass boat with an outboard engine of 40 hp or better. Some places have been pulling lobster out of the sea for 500 years.

6. The Afterlife of the Party

Nowhere are the dead more grateful than in Mexico, where it is not considered polite to stop associating with relatives just because they are deceased.

At PV’s historic cemeteries it is not unusual at any time to find a family enjoying empanadas graveside as they take a break from whitewashing and brightening up grandpa’s crypt. Puerto Vallarta goes all out on October 31, the official Day of the Dead. Celebrations and feasting and music continue 3 days. Day one the spirits of dead children return for a visit and live kids get their faces skull-painted. November 1st the adult dead drop by to socialize and on November 2nd the party moves to the graveyard where altars are decked out with flowers and food such as pan de muerto (dead bread) and sugar skulls. When you die in Mexico they don’t throw out your favorite stuff. Some will show up on your altar.

Toys are left for dead children and bottles of tequila and mezcal for departed grownups. Joking is common as stories are swapped about funny events involving the deceased. At PV souvenir stores painted skulls and skeletons abound year-round because tourists love them so.

7. Not Your Father’s Mexican Beer

When Emperor Maximilian ruled Mexico, he imported German brewmasters, and a Mexican beer empire was built to cater to the colonizers. The resorts will offer the usual suspects like Corona and Pacifico and Modelo and Dos Equis. Victoria’s been around since 1865. But wander into central Puerto Vallarta and discover a craft beer renaissance in Mexico. Just a few:

Minerva is brewed here in Jalisco and was a pioneer of craft beer in Mexico, starting 12 years ago. They offer eight brands from an imperial stout to pale ale. The above is an amber lager. Esta̒ bien!

Los Cuentos is produced right here in Puerto Vallarta. Its offerings include a tropical IPA and a golden lager.

A craft brewer called La Cerveceria de Colima is in the neighbor state of Colima south of Puerto Vallarta.

Aside a towering volcano, it produces Colimita Lager, Paramo Pale Ale, and Ticus, named for a relative of the crow; a black porter that beer raters say gives Guinness a run for its money.

8. Expats Gave PV an Artsy Cache

In the early 50s, American writers and artists began showing up seeking a retreat away from McCarthyism, and an ex-pat neighborhood became known as Gringo Gulch. Mexican artists and writers were likewise inspired to move to Puerto Vallarta.

The Maleçon is lined with artworks like Vallarta Dancers, by an artist inspired by a performance of PV’s Xiutla dance troupe.

Manuel Lepe Macedo was a Puerto Vallarta artist who was known as The Painter of Mexico. The tilework below is on the Maleçon. One of his colorful artworks like this one of downtown Puerto Vallarta was chosen as the cover art for a card distributed by the United Nations Children’s Fund. April 17 is Manuel Lepe Day.

9. Haven’t Visited the Church in the Artwork Above? You Can’t Be Serious!

It took 33 years to build Our Lady of Guadalupe Church in PV. Sextants ring the bells 30 and 15 minutes before services in old school style—by pulling ropes.

10. The Last Thing

The Disney movie, Herbie Goes Bananas, starring the anthropomorphic VW, was partly filmed in Puerto Vallarta. It is widely acknowledged to be the worst Herbie movie. Below: Herbie’s PV cousin Ereberto was once in his entourage but fame is fleeting.

]]>The Bars of Secrets Vallarta Bayhttp://carryonblog.com/the-bars-of-secrets-vallarta-bay/
Tue, 11 Jul 2017 21:40:46 +0000http://carryonblog.com/?p=1277Every morning, before arriving at the beaches of Secrets Vallarta Bay Puerto Vallarta, the sun climbs the Sierra Madre Occidental; the mountain spine of Mexico. And on hundreds of plantations spread across the ridges and valleys of the Jalisco Highlands not far to the east of here, that rising sun causes the agave to grow. And when it is grown, it is transformed into tequila, which is the true Treasure of the Sierra Madre. And at Secrets Vallarta Bay, you can prospect for tequila treasure at inviting tropical bars where the drinks, like the clientele, are top shelf. What say we start exploring?

Rendezvous Lobby bar

Entering Secrets upon arrival, it is by design you come to the check-in desk before you see the lobby bar. If it were not so, check-in would be considerably protracted as you are overcome by an ocean vista so stunning it will seize you by the eyeballs, drag you to a viewing chair, command you to sit and twist your arm to accept a magically-appearing tall glass that turns out, happily, to be bottomless. But seriously, by all means grab a cocktail from the lobby bar BEFORE checking in. It is encouraged!

Genial Pablo is senior bartender at Rendezvous when we arrive. He grew up in Oaxaca and came to Puerto Vallarta to work in the nightclubs and discos. He’s been a barman for 24 years and came to Secrets 3 years ago. It was fun in the loud and rowdy clubs, but Pablo prefers his current office with its expansive view of the blue Pacific and the nightly sunset. On cue, he collects the tools for the construction of a Tequila Sunrise and a Tequila Sunset.

The Sunrise begins with tequila and OJ and a dollop of red grenadine sinks to the bottom and rises to infuse the rest with a hue of orange. A later inventor conceived of the Tequila Sunset, in which the red color floats on top; an upside-down Sunrise. Pablo prefers his sunsets to be blue, and paints them with Curaçao.

Rendezvous is a name that aptly describes what happens there. The lobby bar is the place guests connect. It’s the day-planning HQ, where excursion plans of attack are plotted over drinks. Later, it’s a good spot for a tequila-fueled debriefing following the day’s missions. Or to grab a drink to take up to the room.

Fabian and Omar are the evening bartenders. Omar delivers Mudslides.

We decide we aren’t 100% certain they were the best we’ve tasted so we commission two more to confirm.

There are two sides to Rendezvous. In the evening the two bartenders man the back-to-back bars.

In the interior portion of the bar, behind the wall of tequila and liquor bottles, sporting events are televised on two flat screens. And smoking is permitted in the area behind the interior bar. Many international guests request sporting events from their home nations. That would include futbol as well as football, be̒isbol, NBA, NHL or whatever. Just ask.

As sunset approaches, across the lofty lobby loungers loiter, sipping tall drinks and watching the action play out below at the pools and the beach. At the point when the sun shares the same elevation as Secrets, Rendezvous Bar is flooded with light which crosses the lobby and ricochets blindingly off the mirrored backbar. As though it was positioned by some ancient astronomers to signify something important— perhaps that it is 5 o’clock somewhere.

Javier has been a bartender for 11 years, almost half that time at Secrets, arriving soon after the grand opening.

After handing a repeat customer another Mojito, Javier informs us Secrets offers a signature drink that changes daily. This day it is a Pacific Sunshine. Ingredients: White tequila, simple sugar syrup, lime juice, Sprite, Blue Curaçao and a splash of orange juice. Officially offered only on Saturdays, Javier says one of his pool regulars requests it daily.

A young woman approached to exclaim that Javier had made her what he calls his signature drink and she badly needed another. Called a Mad Passion, it is a frozen blend of passion fruit, mango, and raspberry vodka.

As had other bartenders, Javier told us of the resort’s environmental campaign to eliminate the use of plastic drinking straws. The Movimiento Anti-Popotes (anti-straw movement) has a goal of persuading bar patrons to skip the straw. Bar-top cards inform that the average person in the US uses and tosses 38 thousand straws in a lifetime and that in the world 500 million straws are discarded every day. Javier declares less plastic pollution will help save the jungle, the animals and the ocean. Of course, should a guest request a straw anyway—no worries. As more than one bartender declared during our stay—“Our job is to say yes, not no.”

Public service announcement concluded. On to the pool bar!

Manatees Swim-Up Bar

Twin back-to-back beach-side restaurants establish the border and dividing line between Secrets Vallarta Bay and sister resort Now Amber. Secrets guests have border-crossing privileges. Now Amber guests do not. On either side of the restaurants are matching swim-up pool bars both called Manatees. The pool barmen at the Now Amber often work in the presence of children at the family-friendly resort. But at Secrets, the boys behind the swim-up bar are gregarious jokers accustomed to an adults-only clientele.

Today Edgar is our bartender. He’s worked behind a bar from the age of 18 through his most recent birthday when he turned 40. An affable man with a winning and easy smile, he employs a comfortable humor with guests. A woman guest asks what kind of drink he is making for another, and he replies –“the BEST kind!”

His gregarious partner Jose displays a Bruno Mars resemblance and a comic impishness. When he spots my camera aimed in his direction he grabs the Corona draft pull and tilts his head as though ready to pour beer down his throat. He’s a non-stop production machine turning out drinks for a gang of waiters delivering tall cocktails and cervezas to loungers populating the pool and beach.

We order two frozen drinks—Edgar’s choice. An Oasis is his first creation. He layers orange juice, Blue Curaçao, vodka and grenadine and perched a pineapple wedge on the rim. Then he assembles a frozen Mango Tango: tequila, strawberry flavoring, mango flavoring and garnished with an orange slice.

Edgar says many guests prefer wading up to the swim-up bar to having drinks delivered to their chairs. It’s a great place for conversations with friends while relaxing on barstools in waist-high water with a killer sea view.

There is no better front-row seat to the daily seaside show than the swim-up barstools closest to the beach. With one’s back to the bar with a view to the Maleco̒n esplanade of downtown Puerto Vallarta, on the left is the pool action and on the right are the thatched palapas shading beach loungers with a view to the Pacific.

Open 8am to 8pm.

Preferred Club Secrets Vallarta Bay

The Preferred Club’s higher price comes with perks, including an exclusive bar hideaway and top-shelf and premium spirits not offered at other resort bars. Finger sandwiches and other appealing appetizers are there for the taking. Carlos is behind the bar when we visit. To keep things from becoming stale and offering a change of scenery, resort bartenders move from one bar to another in a two-week cycle. A team’s stronger when the players know every position.

11-year bar veteran Carlos came to Secrets soon after the resort was opened. His family lives in Guadalajara and on his days off he travels there to visit. He explained he has a large and close family and began to list relatives. I asked how many there were in total and he paused to think, grinned, and replied—“A million.”

Carlos delivers a drink he created called a Tequilar. It contains tequila, lime juice, Cassis and Sprite. An observation: You can never get scurvy in Puerto Vallarta. The bartenders either put lime, orange or grapefruit juice into every drink or attach a slice of citrus to it. And Carlos artfully fashioned his lime slice into a flower!

Carlos introduces us to the 1921 La Crema de Mexico, which is a tequila-based version of Bailey’s Irish Cream. The tequila crème liqueur is a revelation; dessert in a bottle, smooth and velvety. He says guests at the Preferred Club like it in coffee or on the rocks. Beautiful sweet taste. 15%ABV. Will hunt for it back home. Fantastico!

He says the secluded bar is a refuge from the boisterous afternoon crowds at the pool. He says some guests find the Preferred Club bar atmosphere so convivial they spend half their days there.

Open from 7am to 11pm.

Secrets Bonus Bars!

Guests at Secrets have free access to, and full privileges at, Now Amber Puerto Vallarta a few steps away. There, one can sip cocktails while watching nightly shows at an outdoor theater and then ride the elevator to a bar/nightclub on the floor above. The border is open in only one direction. Now Amber guests don’t have free access to Secrets.

Secrets Vallarta Bay also offers a Bloody Mary and Mimosa Bar at the breakfast buffet as a kickstart to another day in paradise! And remember…tequila instead of vodka makes a Bloody Maria!

Click here for a link to The Bars of Now Amberand learn of more lounges and watering holes available to Secrets guests.

You’ve never experienced Cancun quite like this. In addition to the gorgeous white-sand beach and turquoise waters, you’ll experience nine world-class restaurants, never-ending cocktails including your own in-room liquor dispenser, and live DJ entertainment. Plus, thanks to the Sound of Your Stay® program, you can have your very own jam session in your room! You can reserve your choice of one of 20 Fender® guitars, complete with headphones and a floor amplifier. It’s all-included!

Kick it into high gear at Hard Rock Hotel Riviera Maya and enjoy a climbing wall, tennis courts, a waterslide, and so much more! This is the perfect choice for big kids and little kids. Adults can sip on a refreshing cocktail and relax in sophistication at the Martini Bar. Little rock stars will be well on their way as they rock on with The Little Big Club Band and put on the ultimate rock show! There’s a reason this hotel earned the 2016 Crystal Apple Award for “Best Entertainment.” This is paradise, baby!

Paradise is calling, and you’re on the VIP list! This adults-only retreat is the perfect balance of relaxation and excitement. Rock Spa® features 75 (yes, 75) treatment rooms, hydrotherapy current pools, and even a personal spa butler. Be sure to check out the Rhythm and Motion Package: your massage therapist synchronizes movements with a rock ’n roll playlist! Club Heaven pulses into the wee hours of the morning. The DJ will keep you moving on the large dance floor all night.

The rock ‘n roll vibe at this hotel is undeniable! Spacious suites with a Hydro Spa Tub? Check. Swim-up bars and waterslides? Check. A pristine beach that provides beautiful Caribbean views? Check. Oh, and did we mention the 45,000 square-foot casino? The biggest casino in the Dominican Republic is fully-equipped with Poker, Roulette, Blackjack, Craps, and slots. Go big or go home!

Mexico’s Pacific Coast has never felt more alive! Hard Rock Hotel Vallarta takes everything to extremes: incredible views of the Pacific, modern amenities, and attentive service all infused by the spirit of rock ‘n roll. All rooms and suites are decorated with a Mexican vibe and boast beautiful views of the resort grounds and Banderas Bay. You’ll never have to leave the comfort of your own room thanks to 24-hour room service, a fully stocked mini-bar, and liquor dispenser. A selection of guitars and DJ Mixers are also available upon request. You’ll be head-banging in no time!

]]>The Bars of Now Amber Puerto Vallartahttp://carryonblog.com/the-bars-of-now-amber-puerto-vallarta/
Wed, 05 Jul 2017 21:44:15 +0000http://carryonblog.com/?p=1230At Now Amber Puerto Vallarta—where the phrase, Unlimited Luxury is actually a registered trademark, you can spend your entire visit happily chilling in this tropically landscaped Pacific playground and just bliss out as the sun bakes through the day and at dusk paints the Pacific with a palette of coral and tangerine. Or you can actually get up and do stuff. Both plans of action—or inaction—should by all means begin and end with cocktails. Here is your guide to The Bars of Now Amber.

Moments Lobby Bar

You will be excused if you detour from check-in as your attention is hijacked across and beyond the vast lobby deck to a drop-dead Pacific panorama. The open-air deck is made for lounging with cocktails as you watch the pool and beach action below or await the sunset. The comfortable chairs whisper to you, “Grab a beer, sit here and play with your phone for an hour.” Moments delivers drinks to loungers, and it’s tough to pass by without lingering when there are open seats at the bar.

Affable Diego has been a bartender for eight years and a lobby barman for nearly two years. He grew up in a small town about five hours away, and has lived in Puerto Vallarta since the roll-over of the Millennium.

Resort bartenders are players in a game of musical bars, keeping it interesting by changing positions more often than a triple-A outfield. Be not dismayed when your amigo Diego suddenly vanishes from the lobby bar after you have become reliant on him for your morning Piña Colada. You will reunite soon enough at the swim-up bar!

We got down to business commissioning Diego to craft the two most-requested tequila cocktails in Mexico: a La Paloma and a Margarita.

At Moments, they like to dress up Margarita in an Old Fashioned glass. Diego says the name La Paloma borrows from the title of a famous Mariachi standard, but that credit for its invention is disputed. Difford’s Guide to Cocktails credits Don Javier Delgado Corona of La Capilla bar in Tequila, but I traveled there and asked Don Javier flat-out and he dismissed that legend as fake news. Diego says people in small villages had been pouring tequila into Jarritos grapefruit soda since it became Mexico’s first national soft drink in the 50s. Mixing lime juice, grapefruit soda (like Squirt or Fresca) and tequila was commonplace before the drink acquired a popular name.

When a customer asked him to help him relieve his hangover with a glass of lime, soda water and salt on the rim, Diego instead prescribed a remedy he swears is superior. His hangover cure is called a Red Sky. Beer, Clamato juice, Tabasco, Worcestershire sauce and salt on the rim with a slice of lime. Interestingly, many will recognize this as the conjoined twin brother of the Michelada cocktail, so the hangover cure may well be a “hair of the dog.”

Diego says his favorite part of the job is meeting people from every part of the world and says guests who visit regularly have been teaching him a little Chinese, Portuguese and French.

He says when good-natured guests discover his name is Diego, they may drolly call him Don Diego (Zorro) or San Diego.

As day turns to night, Diego turns into Jan and Isaias. Jan produced this night’s signature drink called the French Martini. It is made with vodka, pineapple juice, cassis, and an orange slice perched on the lip of the glass.

To the rear of the front lobby bar is a second bar at Moments, where two flat screens show sporting events. Guests seated at tables behind the rear bar are permitted to smoke.

Open from 10am to 1am. Back bar is open from 5pm to 1am.

Sugar Reef Bar

Across the vast Now Amber pool deck, a cocktail squad of waiters develop their upper-body strength by delivering impossibly-packed trays of frozen umbrella drinks and cervezas. The busy cocktail production center is Sugar Reef Bar. It is a walk-up bar frequented by those reclining poolside who aren’t quite ready to get wet (at the swim-up bar!).

Three-year resort barman Jose Maria confides that since the bar is near the children’s pool, he grants frequent requests for non-alcoholic Mudslides, Piña Coladas and virgin Daiquiris.

Among pool deck guests ordering adult beverages, the most-requested are beers and Margaritas. Waiter Mario (who claims the title Super Mario) guestimates he delivers a thousand drinks a day.

Which is a staggering number of drinks for him to carry, but more staggering still is that Jose Maria and partner Ricardo actually craft a thousand drinks a day! Ricardo has been making drinks at Now Amber for 5 years, since the resort opened. He surprised us by announcing he would make a drink very popular at the Now Amber pool, and produced a Bob Marley, a drink ubiquitous at resorts across Jamaica. He says the Bob Marley is now embraced by resort guests everywhere. I’ve had ‘em in Jamaica. Ricardo’s does not disappoint!

Find Sugar Reef Bar behind Castaways restaurant beside the kids’ pool. It is open from 10 to 6.

Desires Nightclub

This bar is shared by Now Amber and its adjacent sister resort Secrets Vallarta Bay. Seekers of the nightlife gravitate to Desires (on the resort level just above the ground-floor nightly stage show) when the hour grows late. It’s the adults-only refuge in the family-friendly Now Amber.

Bartender Brandon is Puerto Vallarta born and has an interesting bloodline. His grandfather was Japanese. His grandmother was British. His father is Mexican.

Pool players come and go in the hours before Desires opens and the club opens periodically as a sports bar when big games from around the world are televised. At night the flat-screens display music videos and disco lights paint the walls with shifting shapes and colors.

For those not seated at the bar, drinks are delivered to tables and private rooms off the dance floor that offer a retreat from the music for conversation.

The most-ordered drink here is the Margarita, followed by the Mai Tai, Rum Punch, Piña Colada and the Strawberry Daiquiri.

Brandon offered us a drink he especially likes to craft called a Mayan Sacrifice. It begins with rum, orange juice and a melon liqueur. When it already looked wonderful, he blended a frozen Strawberry Daiquiri and spooned it onto the top, giving the appearance of fiery red lava atop a volcano.

After we tasted the floating frozen drink and pronounced it terrific, Brandon stirred the concoction thoroughly, producing a new result that was entirely different and even more tasty. I imagine the Sacrifice is sobriety.

Brandon says the club fills swiftly after the stage show concludes downstairs.

Operating the state-of-the-art DJ booth and digital control board is Ezequiel. He plays a mix of music including Spanish language, English, lounge and rock.

To the question, “What’s the main draw of Desires?” Brandon replied without hesitation…”Dancing and drinking!”

The party begins at 10pm and rocks till 1am. One floor below the lobby via the elevator by the coffee shop.

Manatees Swim Up Bar

Alan is our bartender on a day when sun has just muscled aside the clouds at 10am. Our old amigo Diego from the Lobby Bar puts in a welcome guest appearance. A casual observation—Most often, when a bar staffer spots a camera lens pointed his way, it triggers an autonomic response causing his thumb to reflexively spring upward. Must be in the employee handbook.

Diego loves working at the pool bar for the same reason guests love the pool bar—the beautiful views of the blue Pacific. His daily office is steps from the beach and the rolling surf is the soundtrack to his work day.

Alan has worked at the resort two years. He says the drinks most-ordered at Manatees include Piña Coladas and Miami Vices. Cazadores Reposado tequila is often ordered not only for sipping but as the base for Tequila Sunrises and Margaritas and Charro Negros, which he made for us. With tequila, Coke, salt on the rim and a lime.

With a larger splash of lime this could be called a Batanga. Visitors from Havana would call it a Cuba Libre with tequila appearing in the role of rum. Perfect in the tropical heat.

Diego wanted us to try a frozen Daiquiri. A work of art.

There is plenty of elbow room at 10am, but the barstools in waist-high water fill up quickly as those not sleeping off a late night arrive at the pool. From the bar—a first-rate view of rollers breaking on the beach of Banderas Bay through a picturesque row of thatched palapas shading the beach chaises.

Open from 10am to 6pm.

Preferred Club

For those able to pay more—Preferred Club delivers more. And that includes libations. The bar and lounge exclusive to Preferred guests is an oasis tucked away on the second floor of the club tower.

Here, we meet Jaime. He has been a bartender for 11 years and 5 of those have been at Now Amber, where he enlisted when the resort opened. The Preferred Club Bar stocks some premium liquors not available at other resort bars. He displays a stunning blue on white hand-painted decanter of Clase Azul Reposado tequila. This is Not-Inclusive. A shot will cost you $21US. $21 will also buy you a Don Julio 1942 Añejo poured from a 60th Anniversary designer bottle.

Case Azul also produces a black bottle of the same shape painted in real platinum and gold which sells for 15 hundred dollars and a larger one for 6 thousand dollars. Preferred guests wander in from time to time for a sip of Courvoisier VSOP and Johnny Walker Black Label.

When we asked if he was especially skilled at preparing what he considered a signature drink, Jaime’s automatic response was to re-aquaint us with the ubiquitous La Paloma; lime juice in Fresca and elevated in flavor here with a base of high quality Herradura Reposado tequila.

Jaime allowed as how one of the most-requested drinks at the Preferred Club bar is Don Julio tequila for sipping neat. And while Corona flows on draft at all the resort bars, he can also offer his customers cans of Pacifico, Modelo, Corona Light and Bud Light.

Jaime says a perfect day for him away from work is catching a movie and walking along the Puerto Vallarta seaside promenade, the Maleco̒n.

Open 7am to 11pm.

Now Amber Bonus Bar: Bloody Mary & Mimosa Bar

For those who include fruits as a healthy start to their day, the essential ingredients for Bloody Marys and Mimosas and the tools for constructing them are offered at the breakfast buffet. And remember—substituting tequila for vodka produces a Bloody Maria!

We are off to Panama City and not the Florida one where spring breakers bong beers on the beach.

Our destination, Panama the country, is the newest real estate in the Western Hemisphere. The space in which it resides was previously occupied by the ocean for 70 million years between two drifting continents before colossal pressures in the deep heaved up a bridge from the bottom of the sea and plugged the gap between them roundabout the time humans were invented.

It takes a bit of brainwork over pool bar umbrella drinks to overcome internal compass disorientation. Panama is shaped like the letter S that has toppled over backwards. Instead of Costa Rica being above Panama and Colombia being below as one travels to South America, Costa Rica is west and Colombia is east. The Atlantic Ocean is north, and as we face the Gulf of Panama and the Pacific Ocean from the resort, we are facing south. The sun doesn’t set on the Pacific horizon. It sets to our right over Costa Rica. The Panama Canal runs north and south and when one enters from the Pacific Ocean and comes out the other side in the Caribbean, one is actually west of where one started! Whaaaat? Una mas mojito por favor!

The Westin Playa Bonita all-inclusive, our lavishly landscaped home base, is perfectly situated for excursions by those sufficiently adventuresome to desire a brief visit to the not-inclusive. The Miraflores locks of the Panama Canal are just over a half-hour drive from the pool bar.

The Ancon Hill natural area and highest viewing point overlooking Panama City is a half-hour drive from the pool bar. The new Biomuseo biodiversity museum, the only Frank Gehry-designed building in Latin America (On the Amador Causeway with spectacular views of Panama City and the Bridge of the Americas) is less than a half-hour from the pool bar.

And day-trips to Panama City, the Gamboa Rainforest with tree-top canopy tram, and to a real-deal rainforest river-tribe village are also available from the resort through (Apple partner) Gamboa Tours.

The resort overlooks the beach with a view to the sea and a commercial armada of ships carrying cargo and passengers queued up on the far horizon awaiting their turn to transit the canal.

Playa Bonita was once a beach destination for soldiers when it was part of a U.S. military base. A picturesque causeway projecting nearly two miles out into the Pacific from the Panama Canal nearby (created from the rocks blasted out of the canal) helps shelter the resort beach from ocean waves. Westin Playa Bonita provides just the right mix of proximity to the attractions of Panama City while remaining lushly secluded from the urban rumpus and rowdydow.

Incidentally, the Florida Panama City got its name (at the time the Panama Canal dig was big news) when the developer of the Panhandle town devised that if you drew a straight line from Chicago (which touted itself as close to Panama’s capital in longitude) to the canal, the last spot that line would intersect in the USA would be the spot he proclaimed to be Panama City, FL. At least that’s Wikipedia’s story and it’s sticking to it.

Veteran Newsman Dave McBride is an award-winning news radio reporter, anchor and program director and creator of fan-favorite Dave’s Raves. Dave has received the Edward R. Murrow Award for Best Writing for Radio/Large Market and the 2010 and 2011 Murrow for continuing news coverage. He was awarded the New York Festivals World Gold Medal for Best Writing for Radio. In his first year in Florida he received the Florida AP award for Best Long Light Feature in both first and second place. Dave is currently based in South Florida.