Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Mega Blast Horn!

I don't know about anyone else, but I effin' HATE getting honked at whilst bike-ridin'. I can't help but get my hackles in a wad; basically, it's like someone's saying, "YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE HERE. GET OUT OF MY WAY." As if this wasn't enough, you have no way to respond, no way to assert your rights to the road without resulting to shouting yourself raw or crude body language. Where's a commuter to turn?

MEGA BLAST HORN!

This little baby cost me two bucks at Kroger, and it's LOUD. Like, really loud. Once, I was riding behind some friends and blew it and they thought a semi was about to run them over.

So now, while I still can't stop people from being assholes, at least I can show my displeasure with them in a more vocal manner. If ya can't find it at Kroger (I somehow can't see it as being part of the normal stock, especially considering I found it in the soda aisle) try Walgreens or some Dollar stores. Or heck, order one online. Here's one for $2.39! Or if you want a louder, bigger version (the site says you can hear it from 2 miles away) try this site. Sorry in advance if you click on that one, the website is pretty obnoxious.

Are you like, trying to diss me with that bike lube quip? It's true that I could use some lube, but wow, I'm just amazed, because you'd have to actually know who I am to say that.

Anyways, I agree that the BEST attitude to have would be to simply wave and let the rage wash over my head, but sometimes, when someone's being aggressive (for example, yelling at me to ride on the sidewalk or just that bikes suck - which, no lie, happens! Jeez!) I stoop to my baser instincts and just wanna let 'em know how I feel. What can I say, I'm not perfect, this just makes me feel a little better.

Feel free to comment again - I'm really intrigued, because it seems like you might know who I am, and I'm really curious who you are.

Not a diss. I was just pointing out that if you lubed your squeaky chain (which helps you stop and go) it would keep you safer than that cheap plastic blaster (that won't last long) you use just to vent your frustrations and probably could easily get you into worse situations.

The best defense is a good offense. I used mine a little differently. I think the Mega Blast is an effective approach. When my neighbor's kid got his license and first vehicle, he made sure it had the loudest boom stereo that he plays virtually non-stop (6+ trips a day from 5:30pm to 11+pm) and a modified exhaust system that is insanely loud. Polite requests to be a little considerate resulted in halfway measure at best, and instances of noise level increased and duration extended in retaliation at worst.

I put in hearing protection and got out the shop vac to blow the sawdust off the chainsaw I had just used to trim a portion of the tree in the front yard. I started experimenting with the airflow of the vac across the blow hole. The tone is pretty steady and easy to find optimal placement. The first one I bought from our local dollar store blew out because I was curious if increased air pressure from lung power made a correspondingly louder sound (not really) and I blew out the balloon and retainer ring. A new patch of balloon and some epoxy will bring it back to life at least one more time. With my hearing protection in place and the fact that my higher freq hearing is pretty poor, I thought the horn sounded more like the whir of a electric hair dryer. A couple of test runs of a couple minutes each had dogs barking for blocks. It also worked like a bat signal as the police responded fairly quickly as opposed to the 30-90 minute response times for my calls (not that it matters all that much as his mobile blast wave generator is gone before I place the disturbance call). They must have been out here in record time but the MB unit was nowhere to be found. They said they were responding to reports of someone with a bullhorn.

Thx for the link for the jumbo sized unit. I may have to get a couple of these as well.

Sorry Billy, I have no idea. I just picked mine up randomly at the grocery store. There are several similar products online, but they seem to go for around $5 each, and I'm not sure about the shipping. Good luck!