May. 26th, 2014

May. 26th, 2014

So, let me guess— you just started a new book, right? And you’re stumped. You have no idea how much an AK47 goes for nowadays. I get ya, cousin. Tough world we live in. A writer’s gotta know, but them NSA hounds are after ya 24/7. I know, cousin, I know. If there was only a way to find out all of this rather edgy information without getting yourself in trouble…

You’re in luck, cousin. I have just the thing for ya.

It’s called Havocscope. It’s got information and prices for all sorts of edgy information. Ever wondered how much cocaine costs by the gram, or how much a kidney sells for, or (worst of all) how much it costs to hire an assassin?

I got your back, cousin. Just head over to Havocscope.

((PS: In case you’re wondering, Havocscope is a database full of information regarding the criminal underworld. The information you will find there has been taken from newspapers and police reports. It’s perfectly legal, no need to worry about the NSA hounds, cousin ;p))

So, let’s say you want to ship two dudes together because ‘omg they have so much unresolved sexual tension’ or ‘did you see the way they looked at each other in that scene’ or ‘they are two dudes that i find hot that exist nominally in the same universe.’

But one or both of them has shown some interest in a female character! Canonically!

Now, I know what you are thinking, about how they are probably just in denial or how canon only does that because they aren’t allowed to show the true gay selves of these characters.

BUT. I have a product that is about to blow your mind. It will allow you to respect the characters actions and attraction in canon, not relegate female love interests to a characters misplaced sexual delusions, AND allow you to write hot, hot man love.

I call it BISEXUALITY. Similar products such as pansexuality, polysexuality, and ‘not a perfect 0 or 6 on the Kinsey Scale’ (among others) will have similar effects on your fanfiction.

This fantastic product has somehow remained hidden from the fanfiction community for years, but I am hear to spread the word.Available for 3 payments of not being a biphobic and/or misogynistic butthead, this amazing writing tool can be yours to use and share as many times as you like.

For more information, visit us online at the internet.

pumpkinskull’s tags:

#for a limited time only #this product comes with polyamory #so your love triangles can resolve in most logical way possible

it’s a metaphor see? You use black people’s historical and ongoing struggles as a catch all for your cause but you don’t give it the power to address anti-black racism or the erasure of black identities in your own community.

LINK: http://ift.tt/1hiGO6Ranonymous prompted on tumblr: both kurt and blaine with bp… kurt is a little older than him and teaches him how to masturbate? crisscolfbin prompted: I’d just really love bp!Klaine tribbing for the first time? Thanks again so much! <3!fic, site:archiveofourown, fandom:glee, rating:explicit, pairing:blaine.anderson/kurt.hummel, ~author:cleverthanher, kink:boy!pussy/girl!peen, kink:masturbation, kink:squirting, genre:porn, thesetagsareproblematic

Albus: Dad, I’m…gay.Harry: Albus Severus Potter. You were named after two Headmasters of Hogwarts. One of them was gay and he was the wisest man I’ve ever known.Albus: Dad, you say this every time I tell you something. Stop. Just stop.

LINK: http://ift.tt/1lUWrV4“You’ve been so good for me lately,” Kurt purrs at Blaine’s throat, “Massages and takeout. And leaving surprise notes for me to find in all my school stuff.” He giggles out a breath, “When did you even find time to sneak them in?”!fic, fandom:glee, site:tumblr, pairing:kurt.hummel/blaine.anderson, kink:d/s, rating:G-PG13, note:drabble/ficlet, ~author:khalblaine

You can do a calculation based on height, weight, age, sex and activity level (or illness/inflammation level for hospitalized patients) to get a really rough picture of how many calories you need, but even this calculation varies widely from person to person – I’ve heard figures of as much as 20-30% more or less can be needed than the calculation states, given the individual.

Your stomach, small intestine, pancreas, fat cells, muscle cells and liver are a far better calculator of calories than that equation will ever be, and they will tell you to eat more or less through your hunger, if you let them.

Hunger signals can disappear if you ignore them or don’t consistently respect them. Also, some days you WILL be hungrier than others, because every day is different, and you expend more energy some days than others – and to complicate matters more, you might not even get compensatory hunger for those expenditures until a day or two later – so you may feel like you’re “inappropriately” hungry on a really restful day, or not very hungry on a super active day – when, in fact, your body is working out its own nutritional agenda based on the big picture, not on today, or this meal, or how many calories you used by moving around at the gym this morning. And to go one step further, calorie expenditure happens not just through physical activity, but through hundreds of different body processes, all happening in the background, that you will be totally unconscious of – and these may change your needs from day to day.

If you have more energy on the days you eat more, then it’s probably because you need that food. Calories are energy, literally.

LINK: http://ift.tt/1jHDy9iKurt and Blaine are still “just friends”, but they’re the only ones who see it that way.!fic, site:archiveofourown, fandom:glee, rating:generalaudiences, pairing:blaine.anderson/kurt.hummel, pairing:rachel.berry/brody.weston, pairing:kurt.hummel/adam.crawford, ~author:blackmustache, season/series-four