I haven’t written in nineteen days. In the meantime, I have moved – twice.

I am no longer living in settled housing. Maybe you could say I am unsettled.

If my sense of security was at all based on my own place to call home – it may have shifted in the four times I have lived in some other location since last October. Homes that weren’t my home. My stuff in some sort of storage.

Today, as I walked in Uptown, Minneapolis, I was remembering my time here in 2010. It was the location I lived for my first year in Minnesota. My trek took me past my second house in that first year. It’s been repainted, but the arbor which was lovingly taken care of back then, is dilapidated and skewed.

“How strange,” I thought. “Why did they paint the house and keep the broken arbor?” My alcoholic landlord is long gone. The house was sold. Time marched on.

Gifting and receiving

Earlier in the day, I had a healing session. We covered a few topics but one of them was a limiting belief that love, and money could not co-exist. I lived in some kind of either/or universe. So many of us do. What does Simone Milasas say – that most people are in the give/take universe. They are not gifting and receiving. I see evidence of that daily.

How do we change this? How do we become a Universe of gifting and receiving?

Learning something new

I conducted research today for an interview I am going to do with a speaker for an upcoming MIMA event. Cindy Gallop’s YouTube interviews and TedTalks were most definitely bold. I was immediately struck by a 60-something woman who said she mostly dated 20-year old men.

No aging points of view there. She wants to revolutionize the way we speak about sex. Make the everyday sex a natural thing, remove the shame from sharing our sex videos and talk boldly about cum.

Holy crap! I’ve been too afraid to write these blogs let alone share a sex video online. Try talking boldly about courting and true love. Wooing. Exploring the other authentically. I imagine myself giggling hysterically while making a sex video and posting it on Make Love Not Porn. But is anyone bold enough to make one with me?

Mostly, I was intrigued by Cindy's concepts about business and advertising. Female leadership. Changing the world. I wanted to do more of that.

My walk

I walked past shabby housing and several blocks of luxury apartments. I asked, “What would it take to once again have a place I could call my own?”

I thought – the difference between the $800 per month apartment that my friend rents and that luxury place might be that if I rented a $1400 per month place, I might not ever have to see my neighbor open the door completely naked while her cat escaped down the stairs. The smell of cat pee, stale cigarettes and bad vodka would probably not be an issue.

I am supposed to “live within my means” while simultaneously enjoying the dank odor of unlived lives.

What will it take to not be forced to live like this – happily pretending that it is OK?

Reducing my expenses has led me to not make as much and struggle harder. I haven’t seen what people have said are the positive results.

Felines

One of the good things about my new place for now, are the two felines that inhabit it with me. They’ve been fascinating companions so far. Two sisters, one black and one a gray tabby. They meow with incessant glee for their soft food in the morning, romp excitedly in the afternoon and sleep peacefully for hours each day. Often times, I wake in the middle of the night to one of them sleeping next to me in the bed. They seem to like being around me.

Occasionally, I catch them staring at me. Perhaps they are equally fascinated by my human behavior. What the heck could I possibly be doing on the computer all day, or something?

I had two interviews last week and one upcoming on Wednesday. Giorgio Moroder, the disco DJ who worked with Donna Summer, is in town Thursday. Meanwhile, I have no idea how I will make enough money to buy food or pay for new shoes, or make it through winter. It’s a weird kind of unknown.

What do I do? I write stories or articles or web copy that speaks boldly about your business. We dare to take risks together, perhaps. You know you want to do things differently. Together we develop a brand that changes the planet.

We help each other build a planet where sustaining yourself, living in a nice apartment or eating properly isn’t a luxury but a birthright. We make money doing it.

Meanwhile, my mother worried today that I was speaking Minnesotan in job interviews. We live in strange times, such as these.

Or will it? No idea. I pride myself on my authentic writing style and doing whatever is the opposite of what other people do marketing approach.

One of my coaches, Stacy Nelson said she started her business, always doing what other people said not to do.

I haven’t written anything about how to do content marketing or SEO practices for your small business or anything like that. (yet)

The reason I haven’t is because right now, I am flexing my author muscles and authentic voice, on a 30-day journey into the unknown of my psyche. After talking with a potential client today at length about his marketing and business, I realized that my 30-day journey had absolutely nothing to do with creating my marketing and digital storytelling business.

Well, not exactly, anyway.

Was I revealing too much, being too much, turning people off? Was this even my client or should I refer him to a different “expert?”

All legitimate questions at this stage of the game. Also, how was I best going to serve him should we move forward? Was this too big a job? Or was this project what I was being called to do right this moment?

Holy Toledo! I need to write a proposal and not just write about moving, finances, and my journey of healing. And why am I writing about those things instead of SEO, Marketing best practices or something I could use to build my business?

Great questions….

The bottom line is – I may do some of that after I finish my 30days. I may use time post the 30 days to continue using the muscles I build and the discipline – to work on my novel project – see the “Publishing” page for descriptions.

I feel like my clients are real people, who value an authentic approach. They are real, down-to-earth and want something bigger for the planet or themselves. That doesn’t mean they all look like a guru on a pillow, meditating. It means that they value connection, have a story to tell and maybe want to make changes in their profession or use their expertise in new ways.

I guess the journey here will help me hone my own energetic relay messages. I’ve had two people who want to build websites come to me and that’s not my expertise (exactly) but perhaps it *should* be. Could I find a website builder co-conspirator?

Hmm…looks like I need to roll up my sleeves and see what I can do here. It’s either do that or go back to complaining about the job hunt. And that doesn’t seem quite as proactive as I’d like.

Last year, I attended Zenith 2016, not long after having graduated with my MBA in Integrated Marketing. While we learned various integrated marketing basics in school along with our business education, it is not until you enter the real world that the true work begins. Zenith was a part of that for me. To be surrounded by marketers and marketing language and the all the sub-culture attributes was like being a kid in a candy store.

Now that I have cut my teeth covering events for MIMA and working on the Irish Fair’s marketing plan, I ventured there again. This time, with awareness and experience under my belt. Rather than rush, I wanted to spend more time relaxing and integrating my time away from my day job.

Night One:

I ventured out to “see the town.” So, downtown Duluth is not exactly hopping on a Wednesday night. In fact, by the time I checked in, most of the stores were closed or closing for the day. Snow was wafting down from the skies, as it had been ever since I stopped for bakery at Tobies.

I stayed at the Radisson, a round building known for their moving restaurant. It wasn’t open for the season yet. After walking around for a bit, I decided to stop in at The Blind Pig, a local café. Upon entering, the door attendant suggested I go see and try out the Rathskeller, an additional bar area in the basement below. He said, “Pick floor Minus One, not One. One is a creepy basement area used for storage.” Duly noted. Indeed, the elevator button was (-1) According to the website, this used to be the old prison.

The place was virtually empty when I arrived, except for two local regulars enjoying whiskey. As it turned out, it was “Whiskey Wednesday” at The Blind Pig/Rathskeller. I don’t normally do the whiskey but “when in Rome.” By my 2nd glass, I enjoyed a peaty number that tasted of burned gasoline – but it fit with the musty cellar and ghost stories. Yes, I even got to see the picture of one of the resident ghosts that showed up as a very distinct grey outline on someone’s photo (shown to me by the bartender on his phone).

One of the jokes tossed out was about a friend of the two regulars who lived up north near the border. “He’s practically Canadian, he lives right there on the border.” To which the bartender said, “Well, he probably just wants to jump right over about now and be Canadian.” Referring, I am sure to our political situation here in the States. Some talk about fishing and the weather.

After my time at -1 was done, I needed food, so I headed back up the elevator to floor 2 or was it 3. I ordered the house special, lamb Shawarma. On stage, a local band called WhiskeyTrail played country covers. I found my foot tapping and myself singing along. I only had few bucks left so my tip was small. I saw on their FB page that someone recently gave them $50. I felt a bit unprepared.

Course, I was lucky to be in Duluth at all. Building my career has been rough going. Volunteering my time, attending conferences with my own resources since my current role isn’t marketing related. Hearing a lot of “Nos.” It takes a lot of tenacity. I try not to eat too many ramen noodles, but I know that is a famous story of people wanting to follow a dream. Maybe it isn’t ramen noodles but small tips, or scraping up the money to take the next step and hoping it all works out.

Day Two:

I head out early – 7:30am. Since the hotel shuttle doesn’t start until 9am, I am on my own to walk to the Greysolon Ballroom – an event space near The Blind Pig. The weather is cool, a few snowflakes fall and the ground is wet but I am excited to be here.

After getting breakfast and coffee and settling down, Marty Weintraub - founder of AimClear - kicks off the morning’s Keynote by taking a picture of us all with his fisheye lens. From morning until about 4:30pm when everything wraps up for happy hour, we’re running around learning. Given that I am attending MIMA events at least twice a month, it is amazing how much I have learned and retained since the process started a year ago. Acronyms like SEO (search engine optimization) and AI (artificial intelligence) are familiar to me and that includes typical uses for brands.

When the day wraps up, we’re all ready for the after party at Blacklist Artisan Ales. , a new brew pub featuring Belgian-Inspired beer. A Canadian friend suggested the night before that I visit “Last Place on Earth.” When I looked it up, it was “permanently closed.” Turned out he was joking (I think). Why? Because the proprietor of the “head shop” was in jail.

Little did I know, until our group took the brewery tour that we were actually in the same space! One of the Duluthian’s explained that the previous owner had been investigated for some time for selling something called “Bath Salts,” which in theory could have been bath salts but when smoked or eaten or whatever someone crazy would do with those, were an illegal narcotic. Lovely. Seedy under-belly of Duluth.

Over the course of the evening, I met and talked with marketers, mostly from Duluth, but others were sole proprietors from the Twin Cities or students. I mentioned more in my previous blog. Katie and I ended up talking with one of the owners Jon Loss of Blacklist and his partner Elissa and getting into the nitty-gritty of beer making in the tour. From one type of chemistry to another, I suppose.

Went out for breakfast and ended up at the Holiday Inn’s restaurant near my hotel, so that I wouldn’t waste too much time. Nora, my waitress was nowhere to be found so the back-up helped and soon I was rocking and rolling with steak, eggs, pancakes and coffee. Took care of business and writing for several hours in the hotel lobby after check-out. Then I headed out to Namaste, a healing store.

Just my kind of place – candles, spiritual statues of gods and goddesses, healing books and crystals. The feeling in there was so amazing. If I could, I would have taken a few large crystals home with me. There were beautiful lava rocks and large columns. Immediately I was drawn to Quan Yin, a goddess I work with extensively in Transforming Blockages. In the end, I took a couple of candles for my altar and incense.

From Namaste, I headed across the freeway to the tanker boat. However, at 3pm, the last tour had left. Grandma’s, a known landmark restaurant on the pier, where happy hour was in full swing with ½ price drinks and cheap apps. For a tourist destination, it had its fair share of locals, and I felt out of place, maybe a little different. Nevertheless, I enjoyed the ambiance and the history showing in the old signage and photographs.

My final stop before leaving Duluth to head back to St Paul, was the local Starbucks. I drank my Mocha while charging my phone. A Somali man enjoyed his coffee while iPading in the corner and another guy listened to something on his headset while watching passersby in the window. Outside my view, the Duluth steam escaped from drain holes by the intersection.

I remembered the Blacklist owners talking the night before about how they used the steam to make beer and without it would require a much larger space and more equipment. The intersection of environment, city policy/resources and commerce.

All in all, I needed this experience of expansion in Duluth. A city full of stories, locals and seafaring folk who masquerade as brewmasters and computer geeks. The occasional marketer from AimClear, maybe. I may not know when my career will be full-time marketing, but what I do know is I love the process and where it is taking me. How else would I become so intimately connected to the thriving businesses and storytelling of this community?

Want to work with me? Coaching, healing work such as Access Consciousness Bars, Akashic Record readings and transformational energywork - bookings available online or send me an email. I accept payments/ donations through Paypal in order to sustain myself and build my business.

In addition to personal transformation, we can work on your branding and marketing also bookable via my Online booking portal. You can also provide donations/trades of the following: acupuncture, chiropractic, massage, food, gas, pay for my Internet or anything you can suggest. Look forward to working with you!