In today’s world, technology has provided us with a means for easy and accessible communication with a global audience in addition to our everyday face-to-face interactions. The faceless nature of technology – through the Internet and social media – has given many people the courage to express themselves in a way that they are not able to do in real-life face-to-face communication. This is a positive development. Unfortunately, this ability to courageously express feelings and thoughts through Internet technology has also introduced a callous attitude to communication and expression that promotes intolerance and hate among people. In the process of free and faceless expression, some have ignored the place of charity in human interactions. Pope Francis, in his message for the 50th World Communications Day (2016), emphasized the fruitful encounter between communication and mercy. His message was an invitation to the world to use the means of communication with which this generation has blessed us to communicate with fraternal love and charity, not by spreading hate and division.

This brief paper reflects on the relationship between communication and mercy and delineates the responsibilities of the person that communicates, especially in a time when technology appears to be a major aid to communication and transmission of information. As we reflect on the invitation to communicate with mercy, love and charity, the challenge to us as people of faith is: how do we do this? How do we communicate with love and fraternal charity in a society that is culturally and religiously diverse? How do we communicate with mercy in a world torn apart by religious intolerance? How do we communicate with mercy in a world where ethnicity and race are central points of identity? I believe that the answer lies in developing a communication spirituality that is guided by the principles of our faith.

Developing a Communication Spirituality

The message of the Holy Father for the 50th World Communications Day caused me to further reflect on the emerging concept of communication spirituality. This is a new concept; it attaches a spiritual meaning to communication beyond the everyday understanding of communication as a process of transmission of messages from sender to receiver. Communication spirituality embodies the idea that such transmission of messages should lead to building up humanity, not destroying it. Communication spirituality is embedded in the meaning of communication and mercy as presented by Pope Francis: “In a broken, fragmented and polarized world, to communicate with mercy means to help create a healthy, free and fraternal closeness between the children of God and all our brothers and sisters in the one human family” (Pope Francis, 50th World Communications Day, #11).

As we use the various tools of communication, particularly the new media technologies such as the Internet and social media, I invite us to develop a communication spirituality that will enable us to communicate with mercy, love and fraternal charity. Communication spirituality ensures that whatever comes out from the inside of us and is expressed in a message – in the real world or online – should always flow from, and be grounded in, the spiritual experience that has been internalized as a result of our faith. Technology does not communicate; it is the person that communicates by the use of technology. Therefore, it is impossible to remove the human element from true communication. Communication spirituality reinforces the demands of our faith that encourage respect for differences and accommodation of diversity in our human relationships.

The Internet facilitates and enables interaction between and among people of different cultures, races, belief systems, political inclinations and geographical locations. Communication spirituality helps us to value and appreciate our differences through the sharing of ideas and knowledge that enhances growth. Technology does not have the ability to do all these things. As an instrument, it only facilitates these behaviors. The ability to carry out these behaviors is exclusive to humans. Technology does not hurt our feelings; humans do. Technology does not judge anyone; humans do. Technology does not have a heart; humans do. Technology does not interact; humans do. According to Pope Francis, “it is not technology which determines whether or not communication is authentic, but rather the human heart and our capacity to use wisely the means at our disposal” (Pope Francis, 50th World Communications Day, #10).

Therefore, we should never allow the facelessness we feel when using a piece of technology to make us forget that we are persons with a heart and feelings, communicating with another person or persons with human features just like we have. The fact that some may seem heartless and mean in their communication with us, is not an excuse to pay them back in their own coin by becoming heartless and mean as well. Rather, it is an opportunity to put our communication spirituality into play: communicate with conviction, in love and with fraternal charity. This type of communication sets us apart as people of faith and encourages peaceful collaboration and integration among people in our society.

Communication spiritualty in a multicultural environment demands that our Facebook posts, our tweets, our text messages, our blog posts, and our face-to-face conversations have, as their end, the desire to contribute to the common good of the person and the society. To develop a communication spirituality in a pluralistic society is to value the benefits of technology, which are a gift to our generation, and to use these tools to promote peaceful coexistence. People should use technologies to communicate their opinions and knowledge without resorting to hurting other people by demeaning their faith, their ethnicity, personalities or any other natural human attribute that may apply to them. When religious people allow the principles of their faith to guide their communication activities, they will realize that “communication has the power to build bridges, to enable encounter and inclusion, and thus to enrich society” (Pope Francis, 50th World Communications Day, #3). This is true communication spirituality in practice. It is the act of communicating with mercy, with love and with charity.

In our multi-ethnic and multi-religious society, politicians and religious leaders must understand the diversity that stands before them. The thoughts they express have great impact on the lives of the people. We must not allow anger or sentiments to guide our utterances. Rational communication is needed to make our world better. Communication spirituality means sacrificing our anger and our sentiments, and communicating with a voice that is firm but charitable. Communicating with mercy, love and charity can have a positive influence on many people and can bring about conversion in the heart of the receiver of our messages. But hate only begets hate. When we preach hate, post hate, and return hate with hate, all we get is more hate and no peace. Any communication that blocks further opportunities for renewed relationships and reconciliation stands against mercy, love and peace.

Finally, when we develop a communication spirituality that is centered on fraternal charity and mercy, we begin to communicate with respect, with integrity, with a sense of justice, with a heart of compassion and with a desire to be of service to humanity.

Modern media have penetrated every sphere of human life, and they are influencing the way things are done. By modern media I mean the new media technologies (social media, smartphone/tablet technologies, apps, online games, etc.) which are convergent of the traditional media (television, radio, newspaper, etc.). Central to this convergent media is Internet technology. Because the influence of the modern media is both positive and negative, this article enumerates both the pros and cons of these modern media for the family. Young people of today are certainly born online and raised by technology. This paper is aimed at helping families, especially those raising children, develop a strategy for harvesting the benefits of the growing technology innovations and preventing their pitfalls. The goal is to nurture the family in an online environment guided by ethical and moral values of decency and respect.

The Positive Influence of New Media Technologies for Families

They create opportunities for networking among families to keep them together regardless of geographical distance.

They have provided families with tools that enable them to form family prayer groups online through group blogs, group chats and conference calls.

More families are able to own personal electronic bibles that can be used anywhere and anytime. These can be used for individual or family reflections to enhance and encourage growth in the spiritual life.

Modern media tools can be used to create small Christian support groups (e.g., WhatsApp and Facebook pages and groups).

They bring families very close to sources of information.

New media have exposed more grass-roots people to the process of engagement, especially in democratic and political landscapes.

Through social media and the Internet, more people and families find connections that lead to the acquisition of jobs, enrollment in institutions of learning and other opportunities which were previously not possible.

The Negative Influence of New Media Technologies for Families

New ideologies can be spread easily through the Internet and the social media. These are mostly negative ideologies meant to mislead the gullible. They include atheistic ideologies, religious extremism, social behaviors contrary to faith and nature, and other ideologies opposed to family values. Those which promote false sense of independence from one’s culture and family are especially dangerous.

In the developing countries of Africa, for example, there is the eroding of cultural values which are replaced by foreign, and often, misunderstood, cultures because they appear flashy on the Internet. Losing the sense of respect in manner of speech, and the distorted understanding of beauty through immodest dressing and disrespect for the body are examples of this cultural erosion.

The new technologies provide more access to pornographic and obscene images and videos which takes away intimacy in marital relationships and replaces it with sensual pleasure derived from imaginary objects presented on a screen. A British newspaper carried out a survey which revealed that 66% of women have watched pornographic videos, while nearly nine out of ten men (88%) do the same, and a quarter of them watch such videos every day (The Sun Newspaper, April 2, 2009). This trend is growing worse with increasing access to the Internet through mobile devices.

There are many websites today that connect people for sex and immodest dating. These are connect-online-and-meet-offline-sex-matching websites. Through the Internet, cheating is now easier; for example, AshleyMadison.com is a website that facilitates extramarital affairs. When the identities of users were exposed several years ago, many were family people. Similar sex-matching websites are expanding to other parts of the world. These types of websites encourage adultery and destroy the family.

The growing use of mobile phones and chat applications for sexting is a destructive trend. People send nude photos of themselves with others, sometimes with strangers. This is carried out by both children and adults. This is a dangerous trend that works against decent family values.

Modern media can take away good human relationships. Some people may relate more to their smartphones than to members of their family. In such situations, someone other than the parent or other family member, may have great influence over a child, a husband or a wife than his parents or spouse. Never underestimate the danger that such external influences can pose to the existence of a family.

How the Church Can Help Families

Despite the negative influences that the modern media are capable of exerting on the family, I strongly believe that the benefits of the new media technologies outweigh the negatives. We live in a generation that is highly influenced by the new technologies, and this trend will only grow, not slow down. Young people of today are born into this movement of technology take-over. In the future, that may be all they know and use. What is needed is to teach people how to use these new media technologies to engage in positive activities that will help, and not destroy, them. The challenges are even greater for African families because of the gap that exists between the young and the old in technology adoption in Africa. The gap between young Internet-savvy users and parents is presumably large among African families, considering the interest level difference between the old and the young and the age gap of Internet users in Africa. This gap between young and old Internet users is gradually closing in the Western world, though it is still wide. But the excesses of usage may even be more difficult for African families to control because many people in Africa access the Internet on private cellphones, not through computers that can be guided and controlled by parents or supervisors.

The negatives of the new media technologies pose some special challenges to families raising young children. The Church needs to come to the rescue, to help families develop ethical standards on the use of Internet technology guided by Christian values. Below are some suggestions for the Church and its functionaries.

Develop and engage families in educational awareness programs on the benefits of the new media and their potential dangers. Parents who are not familiar with how the Internet works are more likely to ignore the dangers. Organize diocesan and parish seminars that target parents and children. These events should be conducted by experts in this area.

Promote and encourage families to engage in the use of the tools of the new media. Parents of young children should communicate with their children and have access to their social media platforms. Parents should be encouraged to join their children in using the social media. It is not enough to give rules to children; parents must lead by example. Discuss issues with children in a way that is nonthreatening. Merely stating the right and wrong, or even cautioning young children on the dangers of the Internet alone, is not sufficient to keep them from engaging in unwelcome practices. Parents should teach family values to their children on the Internet. Therefore, participation of parents in social media is very important.

Families should be encouraged to organize family activities frequently to increase the bonds among family members (e.g. sports, reunions, and celebrations of birthdays and anniversaries of marriages). This may likely minimize dependency on media technology that may be harmful to family relationships. This type of dependency removes an individual from the family and places his interest more on a piece of technology or on an outsider. There should be a balance between the use of the new media and participation in family activities.

Families should be encouraged to use a variety of media and resources to check facts about issues. Not everything on the Internet is factual or true. Education on this aspect will minimize the dangers of indoctrination with the wrong ideologies of religion, culture or atheistic values that are often found on the Internet.

The Church should provide precise answers to issues that concern faith and morals and educate people on the best and most credible Internet sites or media to use when seeking relevant answers to their questions or concerns.

Church leaders (bishops, clergy and religious) must learn, understand and get acquainted with the knowledge of current social, moral and religious issues in order to provide informed answers to people’s questions. Families should be encouraged to seek counsel with their pastors on controversial issues, especially about the Church and society, that are often misrepresented on the Internet. This means that the pastor must be familiar with these issues. There is a need for continuing education for pastors on these issues.

Finally, church leaders must learn and practice how to best use the tools of the modern media in order to teach others. Our society is growing more sophisticated through the new technologies. Church leaders that ignore this fact may find themselves irrelevant and left behind in the future of evangelization.