I find journal-keeping a valuable discipline. My latest one is a hardbound blank book, 8 1/2" x 11". I call it "Suzi's Sundial Book," and on the front page I drew a sundial with a silly sun in the sky shining smilingly down on it, and underneath I wrote in a quote: "I record only the sunny hours."

Every day before bedtime, or first thing in the morning, I look back on the day's events and quickly jot five things I'm thankful for that came to light in the course of that day. Often these things have to do with how I'm handling challenges that arise, or how my husband and I interact with each other. It's a priceless record of growth and progress, and is excellent *self-defense* against those times when I forget my blessings and am tempted to believe that I've made little or no progress. I cannot say enough about the value of these written records as a tool for growing in gratitude and grace, -- it provides undeniable proof that I have learned some important life-lessons and that I cannot be made to believe that worst about myself, my progress, etc. Instead of doubting myself or my future, a journal helps me to face down "the doubts," and doubt *them* instead.

On The Right Track

M.B. says, "FW Works!"

My name is XXXXXXX. I am 22. I live in Florida. I have 2 children. (2 yrs and 10 Mos old) FW has made a tremendous change in my family's life. It is getting better everyday. One day awhile back, I asked my dh what our marriage was on a scale of 1-10. One being the worst.He said 1! Then yesterday I asked him again and he said a six or a seven! I was a little sad when he said that. After he saw that I was a little sad he said that it wasn't only me that had to work on our
marriage that he had a few problems himself. He never would of said this 3 months ago! Nobody can tell me that FW doesn't work!

Brought To an FW Moment

This beautiful testimony by S. K. will inspire you.

As I was getting ready to leave home to sing in the student recital hour, I asked my husband how I looked. He was wearing his reading glasses at the time, and as he looked up he said, "Blurry." When he took off the glasses, he stood up and took me by the hands and said, "Now that's an attractive combination. Is that for recital?" I told him, "Yes." Then he commented that I always look lovely (!) and "deport" myself well, no matter how busy I am (!), no matter what's going on around me (!) or how I might be feeling at the time (!). I told him smilingly, "It's a public service." He said, "It IS. Especially on a day when I'm leaving on a trip and the cats have [misbehaved] and I'm rushing to get everything done..." We finished with a short, sweet kiss and I felt so-o-o buoyed up. Then he said, "You make it look effortless. All great art is supposed to work like that, as if it 'just happened that way.' I'm glad you 'just happened that way.'" I was bowled over (and, needless to say, sang well in recital, floating on the wings of his praise.)

Early in our marriage, my husband felt uncomfortable with my attention to the details of grooming and dress (he was a v-e-r-y casual dresser) and seldom offered any compliments. These recent remarks mean much more to me than I can easily explain. It's more than just his positive attention to my appearance -- it's the fact that he really sees me in such a good light consistently and wants to express support for my efforts. If I could capture this experience as a snapshot, and put it side by side with one from the first years of our marriage, before acceptance, appreciation, and admiration had become a way of life for us, -- the contrast would be very clear. Although no one aspect of applying FW directly brought about this beautiful experience between us, all the years of self-examination, self-instruction, and self-correction led up to what turned out to be a real "FW moment" for me. I'm still walking on air...

Her Marriage Is "Different"

J.P. sent this in. I have changed the names, but not the content.

Over the weekend my husband and I went Christmas shopping with another couple and I had a very interesting time seeing the contrasts in our relationships. Jack and Jill are a younger couple, married a few years and have one child together. Their relationship is "strained" most of the time and a some times you can cut the tension with a knife. Funny thing is, before starting FW I never really noticed how unhappy they are, and how much FW could help them.

Don't get me wrong, I don't have FW down pat, and I still have a LOOONG way to go before I really am a FW, but it was nice to see that Jim and I had made some serious progress. For instance, we all split up once we got to the mall. The guys went off with the intent to shop for us ladies, and we were to shop for our husbands. The entire time Jackie and I were walking around she was expressing her unhappiness with her marriage and kept commenting about how something was "different" with me and Jim.

We ended up at a Body and Bath store (it is one of those stores with all sorts of nice smelling lotions, soaps, etc.) and we were looking around at all the wonderful things. Jill commented that she hoped the guys bought some things for us from this store. Well, I can't tell you how my heart swelled with pride when in meeting up with our husbands Jim was carrying a big bag from the body and bath store! YIPPEEE I can't wait for Christmas!! (On a sad note, Jim later told me that Jack didn't buy anything for Jill, and that just breaks my heart.)

Know-It-All Wife

From our dear S.N.

FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica.
45 volumes.
Excellent condition.
$1,000.00 or best offer.
No longer needed.
Got married last weekend.
Wife knows everything.