Resisting Change

I encounter a lot of people who are resistant to doing clearing work because they're afraid of losing their identity based in their old wounds and programming.

Some say "How will I know who I am without my anger/pain?"

Others say "Doesn't your life end once you've figured out all of your stuff?"

Many ask "How will I be motivated without my wounds/fear driving me?"

I think we collectively have been trained to live in a victimhood or fear based mentality.

We can't imagine life without the misery & pain we've been carrying.

We define ourselves by it.

We focus more on what we would be losing than what we would be gaining.

I have cleared so much of my stuff at this point that I can answer these questions in a way that might surprise you.

I have spent the last few months (since clearing my biggest issue) going:"Who am I now?"

Many would call it an identity crisis.

Who am I without my obsessive thoughts about love/romance/sex/passion?

Who am I without my need to be famous?

Should I focus on just the mind/brain now or combine it with spiritual/energy work?

What do I really believe?

What is my purpose now?

Yet it is the most delicious freefall.

Because I get to ask those questions Without a knot in my stomachWithout obsessive thoughts running through my mindWithout fearWithout sadnessWithout pain

That is what I have lost.

What I have gained is peace, calm, wonder, freedom, love, and joy.

When something (rarely) triggers me now, I celebrate the opportunity to clear another wound.

If you ask my friends and family they would say I am the same person- just more laid back.

But if you ask me- I'm a much happier masterpiece in the making.

A work in progress.

Who is no longer carrying her pain like a badge of honor.

I'm still motivated- but it's no longer by neediness- it's by the desire to serve & enjoy life.

It's the desire to help others find the freedom that I've found...and to find even greater freedom for myself.

My love life has improved.

My work life has improved.

Most importantly my inner life has improved.

I've not lost myself.

I've found myself.

Surviving your mind

You know how when you're in an argument, you later find yourself helplessly replaying the scenario in your head? Going over and over it- thinking of how you could have handled it better, what you could have said as a comeback, etc..

This is actually just your brain trying to keep you safe. That argument was a perceived threat to your personal safety and your brain's only job is to keep you alive and safe.

So your replaying of that scene is actually a survival mechanism.

It happens whether you have a small trauma or a large one. The intensity of the playback is usually determined by the level of threat/trauma.

This is what has been classified as PTSD. It was previously labeled as a mental illness, but is actually your brain trying to help you survive in case the incident reoccurs. Then you'll know how to survive it (or avoid it)- maybe even better than you did the first time. It happens to all of us.

If this brain function begins to cause suffering, there are now immediate ways to stop it from replaying on autopilot, and driving you bonkers. The only options before were meds & long-term therapy- but that's not the case anymore. This is why I can't seem to shut up about PSTEC and other modalities. Nobody has to needlessly suffer this endless loop of replays!

Save the world

We are all taking a deeper look at our core beliefs - both about ourselves and the world.

When your foundation is shaken by a shift in core beliefs, it temporarily brings about a feeling of insecurity.

This causes us to carry a sort of dark cloud over us and to nitpick and judge those around us- lashing out in misdirected ways.

The battle is inside of us, not out there.

When you come to a place of peace & knowing within, the outer world becomes peaceful in your eyes as well.

This season seems to have had us marinating in the transition- like the caterpillar in the cocoon, falling apart- but eventually put back together but even more beautifully.

When life turns to crap, just know that you are getting your wings...and it will get better. This stage of The Shift is almost done.