I wish to apologize, someone hacked the site and put numerous links into the posts. Grandpa is rebuild the site from scratch, I am repairing each post. You may have received multiple emails when the sites is updated. I apologize. I hope you enjoy the looks of the new site. Thanks for your patience.

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Teenage years. Or almost teen years. That time in life you are so painfully embarrassed that you exist and someone might notice. The coach says ‘good job’ and everybody looks at you. You miss the shot and peek under your lashes hoping no one is looking. Self-consciousness. Everything is centered around you.

It takes a lot of years before you realize it really isn’t all about you. That time you struck out? It really wasn’t you who lost the game for everyone. It was a team effort. Everyone helped get to that spot where you stood determined not to fail. The fact that you struck out did not lose the game. It was merely the last thing a team member did that caused the team to lose. To win or lose takes a whole team.

You’re a parent now and you think you’re over that self-centeredness. You know that it takes a team to get anything done (or not done). But do you really?

So your kid is failing at school, hanging around with losers, being a total loser himself. Maybe even doing drugs, or hanging out at Juvenile Hall at the request of the courts. And you look at yourself and wonder ‘where did I go wrong? What parenting job did I fail to do? How did I lose the game for my family?’
May I suggest that there were times you struck out. Yes, there where a few balls you didn’t catch. But you did not, singlehandedly, lose the game. I’m not saying you shouldn’t look at yourself and find ways to improve. I’m not saying that getting counseling and working to make yourself a better parent isn’t a good idea. I am saying that, unless that child has lived in a bubble with only you, there were other team members making themselves known. Other things, other people, other situations beside home impacted where your child stands today. And most importantly, your child has made choices that affected the game.

Additionally, let me just say to those of you who are judging your friends because their children are so awful – YOU KNOW THAT CHILD. You’re a part of the game. Try not to be a part of the reason that game is lost.

So – mom’s and dad’s – get over that self-conscious, ‘it’s all about me’ attitude. Look at your child and recognize he’s making poor choices. Look at yourself and see if you have given him reason for those choices. Look see if he picked up those choices somewhere else. Focus on teaching him to change those choices in a positive way. Get help from others. Build your team. Don’t try going it alone. You didn’t do it alone and you can’t win this game alone. Your child is the star of the team. You are the coach. Be sure you’re giving him all the tools and training he needs so that the crowd can cheer.

To all my subscribers, I wish to apologize for the recent problems the site has experienced. Someone hacked the site and put numerous links into each article along with messing up the format of the site. Grandpa has had to rebuild the site from scratch and I am slowly making my way through each post to delete the links. You may have received multiple emails when the sites were updated. I apologize.

God is good. A very present help in times of trouble. You guys have probably heard that before. And you’ve probably wondered why God allows so much bad to happen to so many who, we are told, He loves.

It’s been on my mind a lot. After all, it’s been a tough year at our house. While thinking about it, I came across an old Bible story I’ve read and heard a thousand times before but this time something new struck me. It was the story of Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers. If you want tough times, that would do it. Your own brothers want to get rid of you and do it in the most cruel way possible. Joseph endured some rough patches as a slave. About the time he makes it to the top as a slave and life is improving, he gets thrown into prison for something he didn’t do. Still, he doesn’t lose faith. Eventually he is removed from prison and becomes second in command to Pharaoh and saves all Egypt and many others from famine. During the famine, his brothers come to him for food for their family. After a little give and take over some time, Joseph lets his brothers know who he is and assures them, he isn’t angry. He told them that what they had meant for evil, God had meant for good. Now that’s amazing insight. Thousands of people would have starved had Joseph not been in tune with what God was saying. Joseph heard and responded in spite of the fact that he was a slave and in prison.

I suspect Jesus disciples stood at the foot of the cross and watched Him die unable to see any good in this. But Jesus’ death was necessary to complete God’s plan. The one where Jesus now holds the keys to death and hell. He came to seek and to save those of us who are lost. His death was necessary to accomplish that goal. He knew that.

We are just human. We don’t always understand. Sunday, our pastor spoke of Paul stuck at home under house arrest for two years. I’m sure Paul couldn’t picture how he could carry out God’s command to spread the gospel while he was stuck at home. But, two thousand years later, we know Paul was writing letters that would eventually become a large part of the New Testament. He’s been spreading the gospel for better than 2000 years. He just didn’t know that was how it would turn out. Bad things happen. Often to good people.

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work.
Robert Orben

It works for money. It works for other things too. If, each morning, you get up and discover that you haven’t quite reached the goals you have made for yourself or you haven’t quite gained the things you feel are most important, get up and start working on them.