Focus 2/3

Focus
*sigh of exasperation*
Optimus Prime

I’m going through changes
And you’re just watching from a distance
Am I getting better or worse?
And is anyone here to witness?
A new man each day
Went from dark and dull to glistening
Screaming from my soul
Just wishing you were listening

But you’re so fucking far
You’ve left me stranded on the moon
Stuck in space cold and alone
My journey back to earth isn’t soon
And I don’t have the room
In my brain or my heart
And I’m insane, deep in gloom
As my pain rips me apart

Where’d it start? How’d I begin
On this path covered with glass
My feet bleeding so fast
My stamina can’t last
So I must transform
Change my ways to succeed
Hopes and dreams left alone
Mediocrity I can’t exceed
From a truck to a plane
What should I be to maintain?
Some normalcy or stability
So that im not clawing at my brain

Digging and scratching
To get these thoughts from inside
Transforming my future
Because my past was full of lies
Benign, causing no present damage but still no progress
And the fact that you’re gone lets me know that I’m less
Than nothing, so let me change
Turn myself into something optimal
I’m in the prime of my life
So I’ll stop slicing at this metal, get myself up out this hospital

Love life and live harder
Trying to go from cocoon
To a martyr

Trade my soul in for a chance
To live my life smarter
But I lose everything I loved
Because I struggle to barter

So I’ve lost, I’m left wanting
Always missing the mark
Remove this shell that covers me
Take my facade apart
I’m no longer who I was
No idea what I will be
And I’m content in my ignorance
Lack of nostalgia; a feeling that thrills me