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Monday, January 18, 2010

My plan had been to write in this blog a few times a week, every week. I felt I could offer a lot of helpful insight to others dealing with Alzheimer's because of what I have gone through and continue to go through. But then I realized that I couldn't do it as much as I had hoped. I can not drown myself in Alzheimer's.

I live Alzheimer's every second of every day. The breaks I get are few and far between. I live for the hour a week Pat goes to the hairdresser. And when Mark's daughter is home with us, it feels nice to take a walk outside and not have to rush back to check on Pat. But still, those breaks are so few that I never really feel revived. So, as a result, I have slowed down with my posts on this blog. I hope to pick back up again, but for now, this is all I can do.

So, for those of you that look for my posts, I apologize for their scarcit of late. I've just needed a little break and will be back again soon with fresh material, inspiration, stories, frustrations, research, and general information.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

The one struggle we always have with Pat is her sleeping pattern. She tries to go to bed so early and I know part of that is our fault. Things have been stressful, the questions constant and grating on our hearts, and when she wants to go to bed at 7:30, we let her start getting ready. EVERYTHING is a concern lately. Normally I can remove whatever is making her uneasy, but not lately.

Anyway, she goes to bed by 8:30 and then is up at 6:30. I have caught her the past two mornings and sent her back to bed. Her reasoning is more impaired in the wee morning hours and to convince her that I am headed back to bed too is tough. Yesterday I sware the second I shut the door, she sprung from bed and got dressed. Today she stayed in bed for another hour at least.

So, do I continue to make her go back to bed? Or do we all just adjust our schedules? While she doesn't try to leave, cook, or do anything really, I still don't trust her to be up alone. Luckily, Mark is an insomniac so he hears her when she wakes most times.

I guess for now, we will try to keep her more active. Tonight I will try to get her to build a puzzle after supper or to color. And hopefully, tomorrow, she will sleep. You can tell she needs a schedule but when she wakes, she thinks she is supposed to be up... and once that squeaky wheel inside her brain starts turning, you can forget about her sleeping.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I just stumbled across this scheduling calendar specifically tailored to the caregiver! It is designed so that friends and other caregivers can sign up for different tasks like making meals, appointments, companionship. The best part about it is the service reminds those that sign up when they have scheduled to do something so you don't need to worry about it.

Here is the link to it! http://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/ I hope it helps. We all need a break and this tool can certainly help! Let me know your thoughts on the service once you try it out.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

I love playing Yahtzee with Pat. I can usually handle one and a half games before my good nature starts to fade... and no, it's not because she is winning. It's tough to repeat yourself (Have I said that before? I'm sure you will see me repeat myself a lot.). Every time I remind her to roll and what to play. It sort of reminds me of when I was a child and couldn't get others to play with me. I would play games against myself. But I didn't need to remind myself to go, roll, write...

I always have to coax her into playing. I know she is afraid she won't know what to do so I tell her, "Oh, come on Pat, I'll help you." And I'm glad she will do it because it helps pass the time. I don't really see her get excited about it, but she uses her mind keeping score and rolling the dice.

She's pretty good at recognizing Full House, Large Straight, Small Straight and of course YAHTZEE! When her granddaughter is home for the weekend, this is a game we can all play together and it includes Pat in it. Inclusion matters so much.

If you don't have your own copy of Yahtzee, you can get it anywhere. I looked it up at Amazon.com (affiliate link) and right now they have it for as low as $6.48! It's important to keep motivated and playing games is almost a neccessity.

Monday, January 4, 2010

I have discovered one of the best pasttimes for Pat! It helps stimulate her mind while giving me something to do that is different and entertaining on these wintery days when we are stuck inside. Puzzle Challenge: Crosswords & More! I know that I have mentioned this in a previous post, but it is so great, I have to talk about again.

Unfortunately for some people, you may not have the Nintendo Wii. I strongly recommend getting one if you have an Alzheimer's victim in your life. There are a lot of games you can play on it to benefit the patient as well as the caregiver and people of all ages are using it to stay fit mentally and physically.

Pat has used the Wii Fit Plus game with me. She will get on the balance board, have her weight measured and do the 3 balance tests that measure your Wii Fit Age. It's good to get her up and involved and I think in time, I could get her to try one of the games, but haven't found a physical game yet that she could do because of her back.

Puzzle Challenge: Crosswords & More is a lot of fun for the whole family. Pat, her granddaughter, and I have tried the crossword puzzles and especially liked that they have different levels of difficulty. Pat is a pro at crossword puzzles and her face lit up when we played. We also tried the Word Search puzzle and Pat found 2 of the words before we did. It held her interest the whole time we played!

To get your copy of the games or the Nintendo Wii, I recommend Amazon(affiliate link).

If you know someone living with Alzheimer's, please share this blog with them and help spread the word. Thank you!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

New Years came and went... and Pat sat in her chair, watching us, staring in to space... and I feel bad for her. I feel bad that she is forgotten by society. So many people say they will call, stop by, take her to lunch, etc, but then we never hear from them. And I wonder why?

Why do people act as though she hasdied? Like she no longer exists? Mark and I both think people avoid her because they don't know what to do around her. What do they talk about? What will she do? Will she freak out? Will she remember who they are? I'm not sure what goes through people's minds. I understand their discomfort. Before Pat, I was the same way.

Now that I take care of Pat, though, I've changed the way I look at life. I don't think so much about what I am getting out of my relationship with her. More about what she gets out of it. Does it really matter if you are uncomfortable... even irritated for an hour or two? Just look at what good it can do for that person. It brightens the day for someone who has NOTHING to look forward to.

I guess that's why I take care of Pat. I know the difference it makes in her life. I know sometimes, it is a difference between life and death... and sometimes much more. There are bigger things than life and death that none of us would care to witness. I shutter to think about someone else taking care of her. I know the things she does even with two people living with her, loving her and watching her. How is someone with no emotional ties going to be when no one is watching them?

I know some incredible nurses and aides, but I also know some not so good ones. Who is to say which of the two would be her caregiver? She is safe with us, no question... no gamble. And it's fine the way it is. we just wish she had more interaction.

Interaction for Pat is important and it's hard for us to do it every day. Every day. All day. And it's not that she is tough to be around. It's that I have never spent 24 hours a day, 7 days a week in the same house with anyone ever. Even Mark and I spend less time together than we do with her so it would be nice to have visitors. I understand how akward it is though and that all her friends are as old as her or older.