Monday, September 22, 2014

Ten Years On... How Lost Changed My Life

September 22, 2004
Ten years ago today. I was still sad that there would be no Joss Whedon show on my TV that fall for the first time since 1997. I had just become a mom, and was struggling with a month-old newborn that wasn't eating properly, never slept, and in 30 days had shown me the beautiful side of motherhood (the immense love I could feel for my own child, the pride I took in friends and family seeing her for the first time and the looks of awe on their faces) as well as the dark side of motherhood (the judgement I got from non-parents and parents for choosing to breastfeed, the physical pain following the childbirth, the lack of understanding of what I was going through from friends and family, the sleepless nights).

Light and dark. Two sides of that same extraordinary thing we call life.

While pregnant I had written two books, and one of them was about to come back from the printer that week (the book on Alias) and the Angel book would appear a couple of weeks after that.

And there was some new show premiering that night about a group of people on a mysterious island, and critics were saying the opening scenes were some of the most extraordinary moments they'd seen in a pilot. So I was excited, to say the least. Exhausted, and faced with the very real possibility of not actually staying awake through the episode, but excited.

And then it aired. And it truly was one of the most — if not the most — extraordinary pilots I'd ever seen.

The scenery was spectacular. The acting was brilliant. The writing was fast-paced and deep. And I stayed awake for it, with my baby in my arms, riveted. I couldn't wait for the following week's episode.

I thought Angel and Alias would be my swan song. There was no way I'd be able to write any more books after having children, right?

September 22, 2005
I had just started talking to my publisher about a possible Lost book. Maybe Angel and Alias wouldn't be my swan song.

September 22, 2006
Eight years ago today. The third season of Lost was still a couple of weeks away, but I was holding the first volume in what was going to become a series of books on Lost, a book I'd written. My daughter was two years old, and we'd actually developed a sleeping routine where she'd be asleep by 8 and Mommy would work during the day, and after she would go to sleep, I'd write from 8 until 11 each night, and somehow managed to get a book out of it in the end. I was also about to have my first and only book launch for it, and I was excited.

I had just started blogging in July for the first time, and had just been hired by Wizard magazine to do a weekly Lost column. Plus side: I got a ton of people who read that magazine to follow me over to the blog, many of whom stayed with me until the end of Lost and afterwards. Down side: they balked when I asked for a paltry sum of money to be paid to me each week, because, like many online magazines, they just assumed they could find professional writers and pay them the sum total of NOTHING and they would be thrilled to do the work for free. (When the writer's strike happened, they used the opportunity to replace me with an intern, who wrote a lousy column for about three weeks before they quietly cancelled it.)

September 22, 2007
Seven years ago today. I was giving birth to my son. My doula and husband were both Lost fans, and by all doctor's accounts, I was going to give birth to that boy on the anniversary of the plane crash. But the boy had other ideas, and he decided to wedge himself into a strange position and not come out. Instead, I'd be in final active labour for many hours before the nurse from 2pm finally got the 11pm nurse to wheel in an ultrasound machine, where they discovered that he was wedged in my pelvis and had the cord wrapped around his neck. Panic. As they prepped for surgery, a doctor rushed in and manually turned the baby just before midnight (they had already frozen me in anticipation for a C-section, so I didn't feel what would normally have been an extremely painful procedure). As my doula and I watched the clock tick past midnight, she turned to me and cheerfully said, "Oh well, he'll be born on the 23rd. That's still one of Hurley's numbers, right?!" Despite the worry and pain, I remember laughing and laughing. He was born shortly afterwards, with the cord wrapped twice around his neck... and his little hand under it, pulling the cord away from his neck and up onto his chin, holding tightly to prevent himself from being suffocated. Even when he was a few seconds old, I knew I had the smartest baby in that hospital.

September 22, 2008
I had just experienced my first Slayage conference in June and was suddenly opened to the vast world of pop culture academia, and began incorporating some of that broader thinking onto my blog and into my writing. My son was one day away from his first birthday, the blog had exploded into a flurry of activity, and because I didn't write the season 4 book during my maternity leave, I had to get started on it now, and write the season 5 book at the same time when the show would start up again in January. I thought there was no way I could write one book with one child, and now I had to write two books with two children.

September 22, 2009
By this point Lost's season premieres had switched to January, so Septembers no longer had that special meaning for the show. But this time, in anticipation of the final season, I was in the midst of a Lost rewatch on the blog. Two days earlier Michael Emerson had finally won the Emmy for Best Supporting Actor for his work as Ben Linus on Lost (so deserved) and the day after this, I held my Finding LostSeason 5 book in my hand for the first time. There was a lot of sadness and excitement and anticipation surrounding a premiere that was still four months away, but what had started out five years earlier as a show about a plane crash on a mysterious island had become much, MUCH bigger than that.

September 22, 2010
It was over. It had finished almost exactly four months earlier, and I and many others thought the ending was a spectacular finish. While others thought it was the worst ending of all time. And still others were stuck in the middle, not quite sure what they thought of it. We had laughed, we had cried, we had argued, we had colluded... we had expounded theories and written haikus, and some of my favourite moments in my life were some of the discussions that had popped up on this blog.

But it was over. There was still a flurry of activity on the blog, because my final book was about to come out and I was holding a contest where people photoshopped Lost photos with characters holding my books. It wasn't the 500-comments-per-Lost-post I'd experienced in the final season of the show, but slowing down that activity was a bit of a welcome thing. Leading up to the series finale, I had been quoted in so many newspapers, done so much television, and had been interviewed on so many radio shows my head was spinning. I actually took a week of vacation time just to handle the media for the week leading up to the May 23rd ender. It was a whirlwind, and exhausting, but fun.

But in September, I'd just had the worst summer of my life, with far too many upsets and things happening to me personally all at the same time like a giant pile of suck, but I wasn't about to share them on the blog and bring down the room. I was going through a personal low point, and it was feeling harder and harder to smile every day, and I just wanted that feeling to go away. And without having Lost around and the lively discussions that followed, I almost felt lost myself.

But what I was going through was small potatoes to what the creators of the show were going through, being called every name in the book and then some. I'd seen fan vitriol, but nothing like this. And what was so sad about it is that Damon Lindelof eventually threw in the social media towel, and no longer gives any interviews involving Lost, and that's all because, like all of us sensitive artist types, he was so focused on the hatred and cruelty of fans that he couldn't actually appreciate all of the positivity sent his way.

Damon, your show changed my life. And I LOVED that ending. It was an extremely personal ending to the show, which meant it was only going to resonate with a certain population of the Lost crowd. And it resonated with me.

September 22, 2011
I had just undergone a painful and stressful heart procedure, and was just beginning to walk again (of all the arteries they can use to send the electrical wires into your body, they choose the ones in your groin. Why thank you, you sadistic heart prodecure pricks). And in less than two weeks, I was heading to New Orleans to give the keynote address at a small Lost academic conference. The show had been over for almost a year and a half, but people still wanted to talk about it. Especially that ending. And I went to New Orleans, and it was glorious and wonderful (and I want to go baaack!), and I managed to trick everyone there into thinking I was walking without pain, and I met the lovely and amazing Jo Garfein and we went to dinner and yammered about Lost the entire time (duh). And Chris "humanebean" Doran was there with his partner and it was so lovely to see them (for the second time that year, I might add!). There were a ton of Lost folks I hadn't previously met, and there we were in the city of music, talking about a show that had changed all of us. We were all ready to go on, and yet we'd all been deeply changed by this show. I no longer blogged the way I used to, and oddly, I don't think I actually blogged about the Lost conference at all. There'd been a time when I would have blogged three times a day on it, detailing every second of it. But I no longer had that drive to do that. I just wanted to enjoy the moment, and not document it.

September 22, 2012
My husband and I had made the decision earlier that year to move away from Toronto, and we still had a few boxes to unpack at this point but my kids were ensconced in a new school and enjoying it, my son was about to celebrate his birthday in our new house, and I sat on this day and looked out my office window and was happy. Really, really happy. I hadn't written a book in two years, because after writing five books in five years, I needed a break. This was the point where people started asking me what was next, and I happily said, "At this point, nothing." And I was OK with that. In an increasingly turbulent and stressful world, we'd found peace.

September 22, 2013
I opened my eyes early in the morning, threw on my bathing suit and headed out at 5 in the morning to the beach, where I sat and watched the sun come up over the water. I was in Hawaii on the ninth anniversary of a show I'd written about for five years, and my husband was already out golfing (surprise) and there was no one else on this small beach. Just me and my thoughts, watching that sun come up on what was going to be another gorgeous day. I had gone on the Lost KOS Tour just a few days earlier, and had been drilled by the guy on Lost trivia, and there was only one thing I got wrong which really niggled at me, until I found out that they'd come up with the question from reading MY book (ack!). I imagined what it must have been like to have lived in this place for six years, as many of the cast of the show did. How difficult it must have been to leave. How the luckier ones like Daniel Dae Kim found a way to stay. And how this beautiful island provided a setting for a show that changed what we expect from television. Even the dumbest programs on TV now seem to have something smart about them; no longer are executives going for the lowest common denominator when they're trying to figure out their fall schedules. Lost upped the ante of what we should come to expect from a network show. And it all started with a plane crash on a beach only a few miles from where I was sitting at that exact moment. Earlier this year, I had lost someone very close to me, and the last trip he took before he died was to this very place. I thought of him, and I thought of the show, and I knew there was going to be a huge celebration for the show's 10th anniversary the following year. Since I was in Hawaii in 2013, it was doubtful I was going to make it back for 2014. But that was OK. I watched the sun continuing its climb into the sky, and the early-morning swimmers coming out to the beach.

September 22, 2014
It's unseasonably cool here at home. I'm sitting in my office after having seen so many beautiful pictures from friends who are in Hawaii right now at the Lost 10th anniversary celebration. I'm thrilled that so many people had to go baaack to celebrate this wonderful show. And while it feels like Lost had its premiere date on September 22, 2004, and then I blinked, and now I'm sitting right here, I realize what a long journey it's been to get here. Ten years ago today I thought I'd retired from writing after my fifth book, I didn't have a clue what awaited me as a mother, and I thought no other TV creator was going to move me the way Joss Whedon did. In that 10 years, television has changed entirely for me. Aside from the shows I wrote about, I actually watched very little other television. Now I'm pumped for several premieres this week, and can't wait to see which ones stick. My daughter has reached double digits, and my son will be seven tomorrow. The two cats who curled up on either side of the chair when I watched the Lost premiere are both gone, but now we have two kittens, who are curled up in a box that's far too small for them, right near my desk. The job I'd had for seven years when the show premiered was the one I thought I'd die in, but I'm no longer at that office. I have dozens of people in my life now I didn't even know back then. A lot can happen in a decade, and Lost has been beside me the entire way. To everyone I've met because of Lost, thank you for being a part of my life. I have met people I never would have met because of Lost. I've read books I never would have read because of Lost. I've watched movies and other television shows I had no interest in before Lost. I'm a different person now, and a lot of that is due to a show about a bunch of people on a mysterious island, and the people on this mysterious ball of a planet that I met as a result.

And thus endeth my seemingly endless ruminations on Lost. It's really time to move on and let it go, and I think I'm finally able to. Besides, I've got to go and get working on my new Sherlock book. That thing ain't gonna write itself.

34 comments:

Stacy
said...

I still miss the discussions. I would come to work the next day and read comments and try to figure everything out. I miss your blog too! I'm sorry for everything you went through the last few years. Hopefully things are turning around now!

I continue to have a tumultuous relationship with how Lost ended (not with the ending itself, which I was just fine with, but with the overall unresolved narrative elements), but man, it was one heck of an experience while it was on, and in that regards, there's been no better show that I've watched. For good and bad, there's simply nothing else like it, and I doubt there ever will be.

Certainly not to the extent that it did for you, Nikki, but Lost changed my life, in ways small and large. Friendships made, perspectives altered, and while I'm more busy online than ever before, I miss those heady days filling your posts with comments and talking (virtually) with people for hours about the latest episode, the latest theory, how awesome Desmond and how infuriating Jack was while sidestepping shipper wars.

Basically, Lost the show remains a troubled beast for me, at times fondly recalled and at other, sadly more frequent, times rage-inducing. But Lost the experience, the community, the friendships remain an entirely happy recollection, something I loved and love and greatly miss and for which I am deeply thankful. No matter my thoughts on the show, I will always appreciate what Lost gave us.

Thank you, Nikki, then and now, for giving us a place to experience all that. Your blog is our island, but with less smoke monsters, thankfully. :)

Funny that about half or your penultimate paragraph applies to me also. I want to thank you for being my #1 guide to LOST (and many later shows). I also was one who loved the ending. Last August was our 40th wedding anniversary and I proposed a trip to Hawaii to celebrate. "...by the way, could we do it in September because there is this little LOST event?" My wife bought it and we are having a great time. ON your recommendation , we did the KOS tour with Jeff as guide and loved it. We also have found several LOST locations on our own, got to meet Jorge and are having a great time.I would never have expected any of this 10 years ago!Thanks again & maybe 10 years from now we can meet in Mapleton?TomWill

Thanks for everything, Nikki! I find that anytime I think about LOST, I think about a) the actual show, and b) this blog and all the juicy and meaty discussions we had, and all the friends I got to know right here. It was pure wonderful!

It's hard to believe that not so long ago I would finish an episode of Lost and anxiously hit refresh on your blog until the new page was loaded because "I just have to see what Nikki has to say about that!" And now I'm lucky enough to call you a real-life friend, and not just an internet-friend. I've started a rewatch of Lost (with someone who has never really watched the show seriously, and I strongly warned them about watching it with a super-fan) and it's still so, so good. Nothing's ever taken its place for me - and I'll always be forever grateful to the show. It's changed the way I watch TV, the way I think about any pop culture, and the way I interact with people and create things in the world.

Nikki - thank you for this post, for your blog, and for your books. I was really late to the party - I saw LOST on Netflix in Summer of 2009, and watched the Pilot, remembering it was on and I somehow lost track of it. After experiencing Walkabout, I had to know everything, and your books and your blog were my definitive source. I rushed to watch all 5 seasons before your EPIC re-watch so I could be one of the cool geeks.

I love everything about the experience, it has opened up a new world to me and has changed my television watching approach and experience.

I spent some time with the youth from church this summer, and annoyed everyone during one bus trip while I discussed LOST with, of course, the smartest kid there. I talked him into a re-watch (you haven't really watched until you have RE-watched) and lent him my copies of your books, my companions.

Thanks so much for this community, for facilitating this experience in the way you have, through your books and blog. My life has completely changed in the 5 years since I have been introduced to LOST, and I am so glad.

You know, I've seen that last scene so many times, literally 20+ times, and I still tear up. Nice to see old friends.

I'd wanted to watch Lost (because of Dominic Monaghan coming off the LOTR movies), but missed the pilot and just didn't ever get into it.

Then in 2007 a friend of mine started asking me questions about some obscure topic I forget now and when I asked why she wanted to know she asked if I'd watched Lost. I said no and she forced the first season into my hands.

I watched about half of the first season and was tortured by the fact I had no one to talk to. The friend who let me borrow the DVDs lived too far away and we had too crazy schedules to really talk about it. So I grabbed my sister Naomi and we began the journey through this mysterious and thought-provoking Island together.

We watched every time we had a spare moment together but weren't able to finish the third season before the fourth had already been airing.

The next order of business? Get our parents hooked. So we started over at season 1 while Naomi and I waited anxiously for season 4 to come out on DVD.

Fortunately the fourth season was shorter so when it came out on DVD in December with the fifth season slated to begin in January. I'm pretty sure we watched the entire fourth season in a week.

Around this time I did what all bibliophiles do - looked for books on this great show.

And I happened to come across Finding Lost. I read through the first volume voraciously, so excited to have found someone who had taken such time and whose book pulled out so many amazing bits of trivia and made connections I'd sensed but not quite seen.

Lo and behold in the back of the book was a blog web link. This was a couple of days after the premier of season 5. And there was a discussion of the episode going on. With this super fun and insightful recap and people talking about the show the way I'd been longing to talk about the show. I loved discussing it with my sister, but I wanted more!

The thing that really sold me on Nik at Nite? The friendly argument on the proper way to load a dishwasher going on in the comments.

So I set up a Blogger account and dove in, commenting on that very first post. (posting as Rebecca - later to become SonshineMusic and now back to Rebecca again :)

Through season 5, the grand rewatch, season 6, Nik at Nite meet-ups in New York and Toronto, the finale, the emotions, the Lost in Memory panel I had the privilege to lead a year later at the Polaris convention - through all this my life changed.

There are certain things that come into your life that irrevocably change who you are. While I love Lost and it was a show like no other was before and no other will be after, it was the stimulating, fascinating, and often hilarious conversations and relationships I built here that had the greatest impact on me.

I will always look at those 2 years with incredible fondness and am so pleased to have carried some of these relationships on as the years have passed.

I miss you all and have great gratitude to all of you but especially to Nikki who opened her heart, her mind, and her blog to all of us.

This is a fine remembrance, Nikki. Thank you for providing the first fan community I felt embraced by. I didn't come into the LOST fandom until season 3, but right around that time my marriage started falling apart. The show, this blog, and the community made me feel valued during a time when I didn't.

Your work also made me realize I could -- and should -- write about popular culture. While I don't consider myself particularly adept at criticism, as a hobby it has been fulfilling, and given me a voice that I had forgotten I possessed.

I actually feel bad that I've fallen away from your site these last couple years. You've always been such a wonderful warm voice to read. Thank you for that.

There's so much I didn't say in the blog that afterwards I wish I had, and now so many of you have covered it off here. But the one thing I forgot to mention (other than mentioning seeing Chris in New Orleans) was how much I enjoyed "meeting" people virtually, and then meeting so many of you in person. Chris "humanebean" came to Toronto to a work conference, and I invited him over to my house. My husband thought that might be a little strange ("Nah, he's totally cool because I MET HIM ON THE INTERNET!!") but after meeting him, he realized why I felt at ease to do that. Then I met Chris and his wonderful partner Heather when we went to Boston later that year. And then saw them again in New Orleans (I said twice on the blog, and now realize it was three times!)

I met Rebecca in New York, where I also met Jeff Heimbuch and the incomparable Blam and Kevin Kobasic and Amanda and several others in a loud restaurant that was goofy and over the top, and it was one of the most fun nights I had that year. I saw Rebecca again in Toronto when she came up to a fan convention with her sister, and we had a blast, then we went out to dinner and I met Benoit and Roland and Gillian and even more people from my blog.

I wish there could be a place where we could all go, where we could all afford it no matter how far away we were from one another (will I ever meet Batcabbage and Batkitty?!) where we could sit on couches for an entire weekend and recreate the discussions we had here. Joan alone would have me in stitches the entire time, I'm sure.

So many people used yesterday to remember Lost, the ups and downs of the plot, and the moments they loved the most. But for me, it's all about all of you. How much the conversations could make me laugh right out loud, the way we were all more interested in making each other laugh than starting a fight. And even the disagreements were hilarious, as Rebecca pointed out. The topic of the dishwasher knives was one of my faves (Rebecca, I just LOL'd when you reminded me of it) and the other day I saw this very funny video about typical fights couples have, and the woman said, "You HAVE to put the knife points DOWN because if you tripped and fell into the dishwasher, you'd die instantly if they were face up." He stares at her and says, "That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." And I laughed and laughed, instantly remembering that discussion we'd had.

Chris, your haiku was amazing, as were all of yours. You were always the master. I could barely muster three lines that worked, and you always ended up with these massive epic poems.

Sometimes I wish the ending of Lost had been one that all of us would have enjoyed, but then again, if there's one group of people who could come to the table with different opinions on the ending and not feel ashamed or concerned to talk about it, it was us. I remember the first day or two, all of the excited chatter with all of us who loved it, and I noticed immediately that some people were missing. And slowly, slowly, they began to return, with a "So... I didn't love it, and I don't want to bring down the party here, but..." opening, and we all embraced those ideas and discussed why it maybe didn't work for some people. That was almost more interesting than the drooly fangirl/boy discussions we'd had previously.

Lost actually isn't my all-time favourite show (that STILL belongs to the Buffster) but this was my all-time favourite discussion group. THAT is something I don't think could ever be replicated.

And Ashlie, I agree: when Lost was on, you were one of the bright voices that always had something great to say. I got to meet you for the first time when season 6 was still airing, and then coming to London and getting to know you even better and becoming friends, that's been one of the best things about this blog, bar none. ;)

For the record, I just went back and reread the dishwasher discussion, and what made me laugh so hard this time is that we were SO SERIOUS when using it as part of our discussion; that was no joking matter! Haha! Oh my god, I love us.

Looks like I tuned into this discussion a bit late just as I was late in finding your blog during the days of Lost. I was fortunate enough to find you right before the last season when you were conducting your awesome rewatch. I was even late in getting on board for the rewatch, but I caught up quickly and really enjoyed being a part of it for the short time I was able to take part in it in "real" time. This, of course, let me to your incredible books, both on Lost and Buffy and your incredible Great Buffy Rewatch.

Your blog has made such an impact on me and on the way I watch television. Coming to your site (and a few others that I have found since reading yours) after watching an impactful show such as Lost is more than half the fun for me. Thank you so much for doing what you do, Nikki. It really is an amazing gift to have the generosity of spirit that you have in sharing your time and ideas with others.

Even though you aren't blogging as much as you did in prior years, your blog will always be a go-to site for me, and I will take whatever you have to offer! I wish you and your family the best.

I remember finding your book at Chapters; I had gone there alone... not because I don't have, like, 800 friends or anything... just, I just was! It's irrelevant! I was on a mission. I had just randomly started watching Lost in its 3rd season and I was hooked from the first five minutes. I did some research ("Hey, 800 friends, you guys watch Lost?" Not one of them did... they all kind of suck) and I was left unsatisfied. From the stony stares I was getting from Rhonda in the Meat Department (Friend 245) and the I-don't-speak-English nods I was getting from Floyd (Friend 729, who absolutely speaks English with other people... I've heard him) at the Shoe Store, nobody was giving me what I craved. Besides attention, I mean.

Then mine eyes fell upon your book and I clutched it while licking my lips and breathing heavily (which made Friend 365, Veronica, ask me to leave the store. And she did it with that ever-present, insincere grin. You know what? Forget her. Sorry Veronica, slot 365 is now open). I tore through your book (and I meant that in a literal sense, as I don't completely understand how books work) and at the back I saw your blog address!

Boom.

I had never been a big "TV watcher" before Lost and if some nerd had come up to me before then and said "One day, you'll comment obsessively on the internet about a TV show!" I would have said "Beat it, nerd." and then I would have leaned against a wall and snapped my fingers rhythmically yet menacingly.

Then came Lost. Then came you. And then the rest of this rowdy lot who populate the comments section.

I was in love. With Lost, with the blog, with the comments. All of it. It was totally new to me and it was great. I had never been, nor will I ever again be, so obsessed with and so excited about any kind of show/movie/book the way I was with all this.You worked like a dog for this, and we stood in awe of you.

Great post, Nikki. With respect to "Lost", I was always a fan but never a fanatic.

It was that previous Bad Robot show ("Who do you work for, you pretty little girl?") that prompted me to create a Blogger profile back in the day. I believe it was some sort of BtVS Google search that first landed me at Nik at Nite somewhere during the dying days of "Lost".

It's amazing to read this and get some understanding of the kind of real life impact that a great show like "Lost" can have on viewers.

Me too. We are awesome. Except maybe no wait yeah sure whatever even Joan. (Although we all know what "Rhonda in the Meat Department" is, honey; please keep it to yourself.)

I want to go reread that dishwasher discussion now. Pretty much any time a straggling years-later post hits my inbox, spam included, I'll click on the link through to the blog just to bask in the comments again. 'Cause we're awesome.

Sorry for not commenting earlier. I've had a long day capped by trying to wrestle my notes on Gotham into a review, with many distractions; I finally decided I should take a break and not put off checking out this post any longer because, hey, that was always a good way to wind down during the ol' Lost Golden Age. Not that I haven't been here since then — conversation involving lots of the old gang is particularly sweet — but there are plenty of other places to visit on the Interwebs now that I'm back in the pool and sometimes I get here late. Which touches on a whole huge paragraph about my not-so-secret origin as a Nik at Nite Irregular that I've set aside to finish later. Story of my life these days.

I WANT TO USE THESE MEDIUM TO ENCOURAGE MAN AND WOMAN THAT ARE HEART BROKEN , IN PAIN OR DEPRESSED BECAUSE OF THEIR MARRIAGE OR LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP TO FORGET ABOUT THERE WORRIES FOR THE WILL GET THE HELP THE WANT OR HAPPIENESS BACK.I was married to my husband for 4 years and all of a sudden he started seeing another lady (his mistress).he started hailing at me and he was abusive.. and he hated me , but I still loved him with all my heart . the situation made me unsettle and not to focus at work .so a friend told me about trying (prophet salifu )spiritual means to get my husband back and introduced me to him ? i did not listen to her and hoped that my husband will come back home . after 9 month of seperation and depression , it got out of hand and my husband came back home to break the news to me that he want a divorce that he is getting married to his mistress .Hmmm it was so shocking to me ,i felt sad and more depressed ,so i contacted my friend again and decieded to try to use spiritual means reluctantly..although I didn't believe in all those things? I never thought in a million years that i will get my husband back to me a again. but I was proved wrong.after 24 hours, my husband came back and was pleading..he had realized his mistakes..i just couldn't believe it that we are back together. I am deeply satisfied and thankful with prophet salifu work .if you also want to fix you marriage or relationship email him at prophetsalifu@yahoo.com or prophetsalifu@gmail.com , his work is for a better life .

September 2004 we sold the family home (moved there in 1959 when I was 4 months old).

From the first moments, LOST had me. And I normally avoid serial TV.

I needed LOST as much as LOST needed me.

Watching in real time, reading and participating in the on-line LOST world - they were my "relationships"And all the questions were the big questions I was grappling with. The past, the future. Why????

My day job is at a dog groomers. The day after the finale there was a yellow lab at work and I lost it, crying while I told them about the last scene of the show.The ending meant everything to me. I was LOST for years after losing my mom so unexpectedly. I needed the other world, and heaven, and meaning, and love, and light, and sacrifice, and a constant, and time being undone.

OMG, I'm laughing and tearing up right now. I'm a little late to this party (Sept is a rough month for a teacher LOL) but I did have you all on my mind last week. OMG, the dishwasher and Jessica. LOL! I can't really add to what everyone said because I feel the exact same way. Lost was a constant in my life when I needed it most. It was my companion when I was going through a depression and my motivator when I decided to take better care of myself. I miss the characters... they were like old friends. And I miss YOU characters! I've tried to come on here when I can. Bad excuse, I know. I still have to read Nikki's recap of the Leftovers that she said she was writing. I asked her for it and then haven't had time to come back and read it. Yikes.Anyway, I, too, am forever changed by this show. And I feel like I'm "home" being here now. :) -Audrey

He wrote me back and he hasn't asked for my credit card yet... he's a sneaky one!

"Greetings to you and May the spirits be with you, i know fully wellthat the spirits has lead you to the point where all those troublethat bothers you shall turn totally be no more and at this point iwill like you to forget about your worries and know that you will getyour happiness back. How can I be of service to you ."

"I suppose I should begin with my troubles? My husband has turned away from me! And what's worst? He has also taken all of our animals. My animals are my life? There names are: Annabell, Tinkerbell, Stinkerbell, Slappy, Drippy, Megan, Oscar, Ceasar, Nicholas, Nebuchadnezzar, The Good Ship Lollipop, Florentine and Bill. I miss my animals maybe even more then my husband, for he is lower than dogs. Can you help?"

I just wondered back to your blog today. And what wonderful memories this brought back. The discussions here were always so, well, nice! I think people felt safe to express ideas without harsh judgement. You really created a wonderful spot on the internet for us all! Thank you!

My situation was hopeless me and my husband was on the verge of divorce. I was in a awful state and felt that I was not able to cope with life any longer. I found Doctor Zuma Love Spells and tried one. Well, he did return and now we are doing well again, more than ever i so much believe in him email to contact him is here below templeofsolution@yahoo.com

PLEASE!!! I'm Cathy Crenshaw Doheny and want to tell everyone commenting here should beware of SCAM and avoid comments about spell caster that can use their magical power in helping you out with your problems. i don't want anyone to be fooled because i was a victim of this fraudsters who claimed to be spell caster. I was having a difficult time in my relationship as i couldn't give birth to a child. Although my husband loved me very much as it were, we kept on hoping and for 4years there weren't any sign of breakthrough. As days goes by, i will always weep because at that time i was really down. Even though my husband tried to always be by my side, only time will tell as he couldn't cope with pressure from friends and had to leave me for another lady. i was now left to face my problem alone even though my mom would always talk to me and console me on phone. Things became worse when i was sacked from the private organization i was working because been happily married was a criteria that was needed and that i was now lacking owing to my barrenness.kept on searching and hoping i will find a solution to my problem but there wasn't any coming.contacted lots of spell caster as i saw them on the internet but all were fraudsters as they demanded money from me frequently and nothing happened. i had to relocate from Texas city to Los Angeles where my mom was staying and because i became racially abused because of my color too. I spent 7months with my mom and together we kept on looking for solution, still to no avail. There came a faithful day when i met my high school mate who knew i was happily married and living in Texas city with my husband and had to ask why i flew back to Los Angeles. I explain my problem to her and she led me to DR. MATAMAH. Although i was doubtful but soon as i explained my problem to him, he laughed and gave me a maximum of 48hours for my husband to come back and for me to become pregnant. I did all i was asked to do which included me traveling back to Texas city. I traveled back to Texas city, on my arrival during the early hours of the morning, my phone rang and guess who? it was my husband who called asking for my forgiveness and said he was coming back home. He came few hours later and on his knees he pleaded for forgiveness. Although it was a tough decision for me to make because of all the pains i have been through. I love him and needed him back so i had no option but to forgive him. we sat together and while i was resting my head on his chest we had romantic conversation and talked about things that we have never spoken about and like husband and wife we were in the mood and had sex for a very long time that day. The next day which was on the 3rd day i felt something different in my body and quickly went for a check up and to my greatest surprise, i was pregnant. How possible could this be but it happened and am very thankful. we are now happily bind again and all thanks to DR. MATAMAH for his solution.ARE YOU BEEN FACED WITH SIMILAR PROBLEM OR ANY KIND OF PROBLEM LIKE MINE......note:PLEASE KNOW THAT DR. MATAMAH isn't on the internet so kindly contact him via EMAIL: GURUVOODOOSPELLCAST@YAHOO.COM

Mostly, I write about television, and with this being the home of the Great Buffy Rewatch of 2011, a lot of that television is Joss Whedon-related (when it's not about Lost). Stick around if you love Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, Sherlock, Lost, BtVS, Doctor Who, or anything on HBO.

About Me

I've published companion guides to Xena, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Alias, and Lost through ECW Press, and my latest book is "Finding Lost — Season Six: The Unofficial Guide." Currently, I love Revenge, Community, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead... actually, pretty much everything on HBO or AMC.

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The Great Buffy Rewatch!

Welcome to the home of the Great Buffy Rewatch of 2011, where every Tuesday night we convened to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer from season 1 to the end. I was joined by over 25 guest commentators and Buffy scholars who helped me lead you through the watch, offering non-spoilery discussion for the new watchers as well as spoiler-filled discussions for the rewatchers. The entire Rewatch can be found in the archives here, listed by week and contributor. Go here for the full 2011 schedule, and here to see the list of amazing contributors. And be sure to pick up my book, Bite Me, a complete episode by episode guide to the series!