I think it’s supposed to start at 6pm in Australia, but I’m not sure.It’s confusing and left up to interpretation and lots of folks don’t agree with it anymore than they agree with the fabillion trillion other interpretations of the end of days…not to mention the people who don’t buy into the end of days at all.

All this talk of folks being disappeared got me thinking about folks I’d like to see raptured tomorrow...like that wretched anti-choice fanatic who damned me to the fires of hell last month or those politicians who pontificate about “life” while voting against funding for programs that serve those in need…oh, and faux scientists who write about the unattractiveness of black women and their friends…people who abuse animals…Ann Coulter…the heifer who bullied me in 5th grade…shit, the list is endless.

But it occurred to me that the very people I’d like to see raptured tomorrow are not the kind of people who fit the criteria for rapturization.

My list is full of absolute assholes… the folks on my People I’d Like to See Raptured list is full of mean-spirited violent egotistical judgmental lying hypocritical bigots.

Pause…consider…continue.

Hold up.

If I don’t believe in the Rapture do I still have to keep my mental exploration of the happening with the parameters established by Rapturites?

That doesn’t seem right!

Fuck it.

I hereby proclaim that tomorrow’s regularly scheduled Rapture shall be a Reverse Rapture!

I plan to have several cocktails, watch some NHL hockey (love the playoffs, big time!), and monitor Twitter – tomorrow’s content should be fantabulous!

9 comments:

Not sure what the International Dateline does vis a vis the Day of Rapture. If it's supposed to start May 21st in Australia at 6 pm, is that local time (since ahem it's already May 21 there); GMT? Eastern Standard?

I do have one trouble with the prophecy... according to this latest interpretation anyone who isn't immediately caught up in the Rapture is in deep shit as the press release includes the statement that no one else will possibly be eligible for Heaven. I haven't read the Book of Revelations in a few years, but based upon my recollection, those who are left behind to undergo the trials/tribulations/etc. who fight on the side of Good go to Heaven when they die.

I want to kick some ass for Heaven. No, I mean that literally. Give me one of those flaming swords and turn me loose upon the serpents... I think it'd be a blast, not to mention one hell of a cardio workout. Screw the Rapture - sign me up for the War!

Until the Trumpet sounds, though, I am watching me some hockey... go Canucks!

But it occurred to me that the very people I’d like to see raptured tomorrow are not the kind of people who fit the criteria for rapturization. Hey..that IS the downside of it.

Sorrry I ain't been around but I had major back surgery few months back and cant sit for long. Fuckers opened me up like a can of soup and left me w/a nice parting gift of an eight inch scar on my spine and I have to wear this hugeass 2lb brace for another three months.

It still amuses me that people are attempting to use the bible to predict something the bible says can't be predicted. Then again, with all the other crap people have used the bible to justify, I'm not really surprised.