‘King Arthur: Legend of the Sword’: Is It Worth the High?

Welcome to “Is It Worth the High?”, a new column where our writers see newly released movies, listen to the latest album drops, and try other experiences while high to determine whether they’re worth your time, money, and most importantly, your cannabis buzz. This week, Dante Jordan takes us through the Guy Ritchie-ified King Arthur: Legend of the Sword.

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is a prime example of how you should never listen to the bad reviews if you really want to see a movie. I scoped Fandango before choosing which movie to review for this column, and when I saw the initial 21% rating I thought, “Damn, Chuck Hunnam. You’re coming out the gate with garbage?” But five minutes into the first fight scene, I realized, ooohweee, we’re onto something here. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword is absolute flames and any critic who disagrees can meet me by the monkey bars at 3:00 sharp with their hands ready.

Key Takeways:

Charlie Hunnam is a bonafide star

Jude Law stopped aging when he was 26, but the price was his soul

Please never give Trump access to sorcery or giant elephants

Sure, the directing and storyline left a bit to be desired if you want to dissect it, but when you take the movie for what it’s worth ($10.01, to be exact), it’s awesome. The acting is dope, the special effects are especially dope, but most importantly Charlie Hunnam is dope. It’s his coming out party, and if you for a single second thought that he would be stuck in the shadow of Jax Teller from Sons of Anarchy for the rest of his career, I have some bad news for you: WRONG ANSWER. If anything, Jax will have to live in Charlie’s shadow because he’s absolutely built for movie stardom, and this is only the beginning.

He has that It Factor that draws you in as soon as he appears on screen. He has that badass factor that makes men rock with him, but he also has that Bradley Cooper-like factor that drives women wild. You should’ve heard the puddles hit the floor when he popped up shirtless. Combine that with his very real acting abilities, and you’ve got the possible future of the industry. The thing with C-Hunn is you watch his characters and you truly believe him. I believed he was Jax, now I believe he’s Arthur. In a time where our biggest action stars are Dwayne Johnson and Vin Diesel, he’s a refreshing new face.

ALSO, Jude Law, people. Is he not the perfect villain for flicks like this? I mean, really. He has that look and he completely owned it. You watch his performance as King Vortigern and it gives you the same feeling as watching Joaquin as Commodus in Gladiator: you haaaaaaate him. You hate him so much and you know that he has to take a supreme L at some point because that’s how movies work, so you just wait…and you wait…and you wait…and when the climax of the movie hits, let’s just say things get extremely litty. Yup. Litty.

Is It Worth the High? You bet your buns it is. Don’t let the know-it-alls fool you, King Arthur: Legend of the Sword goes extremely hard. Even if you watch this movie and don’t like it (the monkey bars invitation stands), I guarantee you’ll still leave the theater craving more Charlie Hunnam, which is perfect for those that do like the movie because the ending 100% implies a sequel is on the way. (Or so we hope.)

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