As I approach my 36th (gasp!) birthday, I think I have reached my breaking point with my weight and my denial of it having gotten far beyond what is acceptable for me. I simply can't ignore it anymore! I guess it has gotten to the point where staying the same and being in denial about it is actually proving to be harder than actually addressing it and doing something about it (which, as we know, is very hard indeed). I think I've always preferred to just suffer and be passive and feel hopeless about things I'm unhappy with in my life rather than take them on and attempt to bring about change. But I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm sick and tired of being unrecognizeable to myself when I pass a reflective window on the street. I'm sick and tired of the effort it takes to find something acceptable to wear to work each day. I'm sick and tired of being the biggest person in the room at staff meetings. I'm sick and tired of feeling guilty for not being the same size as the woman my husband fell in love with. And I'm sick and tired of how it feels physically to carry around the extra weight every day. So I guess the only alternative is to make some changes, and stick with them. Today is Day 10 of revised eating habits. And of taking more control over what I will and will not put into my mouth. And of asking for help.
Any advice for someone like me who has zero experience with dieting, has endless days at the office, and lives in a city that offers every kind of sinful edible item on every street corner?
Thanks for listening.

Good for you for making the decision and sticking with it. For your questions, start with getting your diet in check. Count calories and try to stick with: lean proteins, whole grain foods (including pastas, rice, etc.), fruit, and vegetables. Find some physical activities you enjoy and start working them into your day. Start making your new choices lifestyle habits. There's also lots of online resources about "exercises you can do at work" if you're really feeling pinched for time. Good luck.

The good thing about zero experience dieting is you probably can make some easy changes that will make an impact. Usually drink a calorie filled Latte? Usually drink soda with lunch, switch to water. Pack healthy calorie concious lunches instead of eating out all the time,it takes the decision making in the middle of a stressful day out of it.

Congratulations on ten days of success! I know what you mean about the sick and tired. I, too, would love to be the same size I was when my husband and I were first together... it feels like forever ago.
The good news about a city that has everything, is that it must have good things, too. Are you doing "cheat days" every now and then so that you don't obsess (or is that just me)?

Krista, I'm not sure if I'm going to designate a cheat day officially or not, but if I do, it will be Saturday night. My weakness is ice cream on a Saturady night, which is when my husband and I watch our TV series on Hulu or Netflix. So far the rest of the time hasn't been that bad, but last Saturday night I couldn't resist. And I'm not talking an entire pint, just half. And if that's the most damage do, then that's pretty good, compared to what I'm capable of!
In terms of the work week and being in the city, I've been bringing all my food from home so that I don't even have to think about it or venture out there and be tempted by anything. I bring fat free yogurt, a can of low-sodium V8, and a small turkey and mustard sandwich on whole wheat, plus a few unsalted almonds. I find much relief in having a plan for during the day rather than being pressed for time while at work and ending up with some junky lunch that I'm not even happy with.
But yeah--this morning it was hard--I went to the Starbucks for an iced coffee and had to gaze at all the coffee cakes and such in the pastry case while I waited my turn...
Day 12, here we go...

Keep it up. I feel guilty about Saturday cheat days although they have official sanctioned cheats I still workout the longest and hardest on Saturdays. I try to get in 1000 calories of physical activity at the gym, playground with boys, and an evening walk in the neighborhood. So I think if your only big cheat is a half a pint on Saturday night, you are great. Especially sine most ice cream is like 150 a serving. Want to feel less guilty, try those Edy's light flavors. They taste the same as the full fat version IMHO.

Load up on fresh whole foods: veggies, fruits, beans/legumes. Cut back on everything else. Limit processed and packaged foods that have loads of preservatives and additives. Eat whole grains, brown rice or quinoa. Stay away from processed flours and sugars. Cut back on cheese and dairy as they are full of fat. Cut out excessive use of fatty spreads, dips, dressings, oil and deep fried foods. Cut out as much sodium as possible. Cut out all caffeine (tea, coffee, soda).

About once a week I may use 1 tbsp olive oil. And rarely, have half a slice a bread or some bread crumbs if baking.

I don't count calories, am never hungry, don't have cravings, and have had consistent weight loss.

I cut out anything I felt was linked to me becoming fat in the first place. Cookies, cakes, crackers, pie, ice cream, cheese, milk, bread, pasta, rice, sugar, salt, meat, oil, butter, etc. All gone. I also weened myself off caffeine over four days (going from 4-6 cans of diet coke a day to 0). I had headaches for 1-2 days, but I have been caffeine free since then.

I have never felt so at ease with my diet. I almost feel guilty by how much I do eat. I have a 44 oz smoothie for breakfast (3-4 servings veg, 3-4 servings fruit) made in the blender. Then I have a giant salad for lunch (fresh greens, some nuts, and fruit chopped up, no dressing). Dinner I have cooked veggies, some beans/legumes, and maybe a small salad. And dessert I have fresh fruit (Banana, pineapple, tangerines).

I'm not advocating being a vegetarian (though I am a vegetarian). You can still have lean meat, but you should use it sparingly when dieting. (2-3 times a week) and red meat (not more than 4 oz) only once a month.

If you want more info on how I eat, you should check out Dr. Furhman's book "Eat to Live"

Just wanted to offer some moral support, as your post really struck a chord with me. I could have written it verbatim pretty much a few months ago, and was in the exact same spot!! I WAS sick and I WAS tired... of it ALL, the way I was living, or more like existing.

I still have such a long way to go, but the biggest difference now is I feel in control, I feel hope, and confidence that I can and will do this!
And I am holding onto those feelings for dear life! With every little milestone it gives me a shove in the right direction and I already honestly FEEL lighter, literally and figuratively.

definitely allow yourself to enjoy those sinful things every once in a while, whether it's once a week, once a month, plan for it, what you're going to eat, how much, work it into your plan. Allowing myself indulgences once a week is what's keeping me on my mission, Knowing it's OKAY and that I don't need to be chained to a life of radishes to lose weight. LOL And funny thing is as time goes on I am craving them less and less. Yesterday was my first cheat day that I didn't really even cheat. There was nothing I really felt like I just HAD to have, like in prior weeks.
I am also a calorie counter, but as you go you will find what works for you.

Many hugs and wishes for success, and changing those feelings to those of well being and energetic.
Thanks for sharing!