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Club 90 - Hosting - I have non swinging vanilla friends, who as far as I know don't know we swing, who think Club 90 is a swingers hang out. They thought it was a swingers hang out back when Habits really was where swingers went.

taking one for the team - - Very well said... this is a great topic. Anyone interested in adding it to the Swingers Wiki? ThoughtGarden may have some good words. Here is the wiki: http://wiki.swingular.com.

Finding a balance - Swinging and Religion - - This has always been a tough controversy. Religion, swinging. I am agnostic and my GF was LDS. Her family is hardcore LDS still and pushed the faith on their daughter (my GF) and her kids even. They preach that they want their whole family in the religion cuz they need to know "right from wrong". I asked the kids (8 & 6 yrs old) what they learn in church.. seems to me all they learn about is how great their "savior" is, how he loves us, and we can look to him, and family is a "unit".. they dont seem to learn anythign about right and wrong. Yet.. her parents try to preach to me that their religion teaches them right from wrong and that their "right & wrong" is the correct one. They are also very controlling, judgemental, pushy, 2-faced, and negative in every aspect... OMG! is this what u learn in church and how family is supposed to be?? They found out we swing, and told me its adultry and we're cheating and its immoral.. OK, umm.. we;re not married and what we do is 100% consentual... funny, but seems like the more LDS we meet, the more seem to be JACK mormons. so why are LDS swinging or why are swingers in religions that condem it? is it just for the prestige and status of being in the church and to shut the family up??
Ok, #1, I hate ppl who follow a faith and feel theirs is the correct one so much that they push it on everyone and judge other beliefs as the wrong ones rather then understanding tolerance and the fact that there is no such thing as right or wrong... only opinion and difference... what works for you may not work for me.
#2, I hate hypocrates. ppl who preach about how much they follow their religion, go to church and lie in front of everyone there about how much they follow the rules and how the church has saved them.. Then, behind closed doors, they go against everything they believe in. Then they preach about how much they follow their churches rules and its "right & wrong" is the ultimate. Those ppl are called liars and 2-facers..
#3, Kids should be taught "Right & Wrong" from their parents, not a group of ppl that i described in examples #1 & #2. WTF do they know?? Kids should also be introduced to church by their own choice and when they are old enuf to understand it.
[b]In my opinion, If you wanna swing, then it doesnt seem like u really believe in ur church's beliefs... why are u in it? If u believe ur church's teachings above all.. then why are you swinging?[/b]
[b]I have nuthing against either, but I think its best to pick a side. Thats why I dont follow any religion.. I dont believe in any of them... too many hypocrates, liars, 2-facers, judgemental, stuck-ups... people who are willing to bend and cheat their own rules, morals and beliefs behind closed doors and especially when its to their benefit...[/b]

Super Bowl Swing-Style? - Are there parameters for this? - Our SB party is vanilla during the game, then those people leave and the swinging gets started with the swingers that stay for the fun. I think if the game is boring might have to do some disappearing from the vanilla for some extra swinging activity.

Worlds Largest Sex Survey - Want to know what other people are thinking about sex? - This is one idea of what you may see.
When was the last time you had sex?
17.0% Today! (last 24 hours)
31.7% This Week (last 7 days)
18.4% This Month (last 30 days)
16.2% This Year
16.7% Loooonger Than a Year
Total Responses: 9019
Woo Hoo we are part of the 17% all the time, that is a good thing!
Another one:
Have you ever had a threesome?
74.8% No
15.7% Yes - 2 Girls, 1 Guy
6.8% Yes - 2 Guys, 1 Girl
1.5% Yes - 3 Guys
1.2% Yes - 3 Girls
Total Responses: 9106
WE HAVE TO CHANGE THIS ONE, SO MORE SWINGERS NEED TO ANSWER HERE - LOL - Too high of a percentage of NO's.

Taking It Like A Champ - Best and worst ways to say "no thanks" - So I'm sure we've all been the recipients of a "Ya, we're just not interested" type of rejection after meeting a hot, fun couple that we thought we clicked with. No? Just us? Well then maybe you've handed a few of those out. So what ways have you successfully told a couple they're just not good enough, or how have you been nicely rejected in a way that didn't devastate you? We want to find a way to let a couple down that doesn't leave a them bawling their eyeballs out or pinning our picture to the wall and throwing darts at it. Especially if we like them...we just don't LIKE them. You know? Share your experiences, oh wise swingers!

bi curious, how many are to make thier guys happy - - Hello, Everyone, I am new to the scene and open to new sexual encounters. I started exploring my sexual dark side when I became a web model in 2015 the first show I will admit I was a little nervous but I had to relax and go with the flow at that moment I knew I was open to endless possibilities in the bedroom, my first experience with a couple was interesting I was at a swingers party and this guy and his spouse walk over and went to work on me the next thing I know I was fucking his old lady doggy style when sucking his dick I thought hum this may be fun after all after all swinging was not so odd after all. 509-876-5776

A Single Male's Guide To Successful Swinging - Geared Toward Swinging At A Club - [url=http://docs.google.com/View?id=ddk7w7c2_2dhmjzgpd]Article Here...Clicky Clicky! ;)[/url]
[align=center][b]A Single Male's Guide To Successful Swinging[/b]
[i]Written by an experienced full-swap couple who prefer MFM[/i][/align]
When at the swing club:
[b]1. Don't be a wall-flower[/b]
Guys who sit in the corner, or even in the middle of the action but by themselves, and wait for the conversation to come to them rarely have conversations, let alone sex. It's true, you don't want to be too aggressive or overly-imposing, but total shyness is unattractive to both the female and her husband/partner. The best thing to do is simply join groups or make conversation. So how do you do this without feeling like you're awkwardly waiting to join a conversation? Glad you asked. There are several great places in the swing club that conversation will flow and come naturally and you will not feel like you are imposing on a conversation in progress. Among these are the bar, the swimming pool, the hot tub(s), the smoking room, and the outdoor fire pit, if there happens to be one with a fire going that night. These places are great because conversation is secondary to another activity. You won't feel like you are trying to impose yourself on a conversation with strangers and they won't feel like you are imposing. People go to the bar to drink and engage in conversation. People go to the hot tub to soak and engage in conversation. People go to the pool to swim or play water-volleyball and engage in conversation. People go to the smoking lounge to smoke and engage in conversation. People go to the fire pit to get warm, roast marshmallows and engage in conversation. Are you seeing a pattern here? There is always a primary reason to be at these places where people like light conversation to augment what is going on. If you simply place yourself in these places and say "Hi", a couple, single lady, or group is very likely to strike up conversation with you. Once you take this simple step, you are literally at least 100 times more likely to play than if you keep to yourself or even sit in a high traffic area hoping someone will approach you. There is no fear of rejection because you are not asking for sex, you are engaging in conversation that should come quite naturally. The hot tub and smoking area are particularly great because people are usually facing each other in a smaller area, and no one wants to sit in awkward silence. Even if you don't smoke it may be well worth your while to sit in the smoking room and enjoy a drink or soda. No one will care that you are not smoking and, if someone does point out the fact that you are not smoking or asks you why you are in the smoker's lounge you simply say, "The smoking area is usually where you find the best conversation!" That simple phrase will spark even more great conversation, get a few laughs, prompt others to voice agreement, and makes a great ice breaker.
[b]2. Be yourself and if that doesn't work, be yourself![/b]
You are not going to fuck everyone who strikes up a conversation with you. In fact, you will most likely only play with a very small minority of the women and couples you meet. (Don't be alarmed by this, it's the same for couples and even single ladies.) So if you meet a couple or woman you want to play with and it doesn't go there, don't worry; it's not a failure. Anytime you comfortably engage in conversation it's a success. It's a numbers game: You talk to enough people and eventually you will get laid. (You are in a swingers' club after all!) Some people will not play with you on a first meet, but may play with you at a later date or time. Some couples will want to talk about you together before they invite you into their sex life. Some people will never swing with you. That's okay too. When all else fails, continue to be yourself. The vast majority of genuine swingers are VERY REAL people and they will spot a fake a mile away. And you don't need to worry about impressing the pseudo-swingers because they were never really going to fuck you (or anyone else) anyway. There's one more very important reason to be yourself: The sex will often (almost always) reflect the situation. If you or the couple/single lady are putting on uneasy airs or are feeling awkward or uncomfortable because of a front the sex will often be uneasy, awkward, and uncomfortable. While it may seem to a single guy that any sex is good sex at first, once you become experienced you will see that quality trumps quantity every time. In fact, quality leads to quantity! If the experience is comfortable and good for all involved the couple may ask you back to play again, will definitely talk you up to their friends, and the more good experiences you have the more your confidence will grow! This all all results in more play in the long-term for you!
[b]3. Don't go to the club with the expectation of getting laid[/b]
This may sound contradictory or funny, but it is one of the most important things you can do to guarantee your success and it will ensure your night is not wasted when you don't get laid. For the single male new to the lifestyle this could be the majority of the time at first. If you are trying too hard, or are too tied to the outcome you will put pressure on yourself and you will say and do all the wrong things. This is indeed a LIFESTYLE. For many couples it's not just about fucking. Of course it's definitely about fucking, but not JUST fucking. There is far more going on here than that. This is about freedom, trust, friendship, and there are a myriad of reasons couples are involved in this thing that you can never understand unless you have been a part of a loving swing partnership. While you are ultimately at the club for sex, if you don't enjoy other aspects of "the lifestyle" you are in the wrong place. If you don't enjoy more about this thing than just "getting laid", then you are just not a swinger. Save yourself some money and go to a singles bar. You will pay more for alcohol than you will at the BYOB swing clubs, but you won't be paying 50 to 100 dollars or more for the simple privilege of walking through the door.
[b]4. Don't be "That Guy"[/b]
You know who he is. If you have ever been to a swing club you have probably seen him. Depending on the club you are at you may have seen him hundreds, or even thousands of times. He's the guy who follows or even chases women around the club, makes cheesy come-ons, is way too aggressive, and usually makes a bee-line for a woman the moment her partner goes to the restroom or disappears from sight. In short, don't be an aggressive asshole. At the larger clubs these morons can run in packs of five, ten or more. Most couples are not looking for an asshole, so don't be one. And if you still think you need to be overly-aggressive to score, consider this: If a couple is willing to swing with an aggressive prick they have plenty of men to choose from. You will be one of many aggressive jerks competing for the attention of one or two couples (at best) while the rest of the couples that may be looking for a single guy will be choosing from a few single men who know and practice the secrets you are learning right now. In short: The vast majority of single men never get laid at swing clubs because they are either too shy or too aggressive. If you are going to be the jerk who chases women around the club you are going to end up jerking off with ten other men while you watch some exhibitionist couple have sex. If that's what you are there for great! If not, save yourself some money and rent a porn.
[b]5. Don't make "Jr. High School" sexual jokes or come-ons[/b]
It's just a turn-off. If the couple or single female goes there, and this seems to be what they want, then fine. But if you go there first you will almost guarantee that you won't be playing that night. An example of this is saying something like, "I've got some sausage for you, baby!" when she says she's hungry. Witty and subtle sexual innuendo can be great if it's your real personality and you are getting a sexual vibe from the couple. Picking up on flirtatious cues and reciprocating is awesome. Even steering the conversation toward the sexual at the right time is something that can increase your chances of success. These subtle skills and ability to read people will come naturally, if you are not already adept, as you gain more experience in the lifestyle and your confidence grows. It's like driving a car. You probably do things and react to situations naturally that you had to nervously think about when you first got your learner's permit. If you are not adept at picking up on cues don't worry, that skill will come! It's better not to try to force things and miss a few cues than to kill your chances with a lame joke or cheesy come-on. On several occasions when we have been interested in a single guy who is comfortably engaging in conversation but missing our cues we have simply pulled him aside and asked him if he would like to join us in a threesome. Not every couple will do this but it does happen, and more often than you think! If you are feeling like a newbie but still want to practice the skill of picking up cues and making appropriate jokes so as not to miss opportunities you probably have the following question: How do you tell if you are being witty or making a lame come-on? Fortunately, the answer is simple! If it the conversation feels natural you are probably being witty. If you find yourself looking for an opportunity to say something sexual or are trying to force it you will probably come off poorly. The best rule of thumb is this: If it's something that might come out of a horny eighth-grader's mouth it's probably best not to say it.
[b]6. Don't be "handsy"[/b]
Grabbing her tits, feeling on her leg, or being overtly physical with her is unwelcome, even if she is flirting with you and especially if you haven't been invited to do so by her and checked things with her partner. Flirting is an invitation to flirt back, not to caress her breasts, rub your penis against her, or touch her legs. There are only two universal, stead-fast rules throughout the lifestyle: 1. Ask before you touch. 2. No means NO! (In fact, any response other than yes means NO!) We actually rejected a good-looking, fun-loving single male once because he was too hands-on without permission from either of us. By the time he got around to asking the male half if we were open for play in an appropriate manner, the damage was done. The male half was still willing to consider it in light of the poor guy's corrected demeanor, but the female half, who had actually been flirting with this single male at first, had decided she did not like him. Similar behavior with other females at the club that night resulted in the same fruitless-labor for him. We ended up playing with his better-behaved, more well-mannered friend, while he went home empty-handed. (Well, maybe not empty-handed, but suffice it to say whatever, he had in his hand was attached to his own body!)
[b]7. Don't talk about your penis size unless you are asked. If you are asked, DON'T LIE![/b]
Talking about the size of your "manhood" without being asked may have the same result as making lame sexual come-ons. (If you don't know what lame sexual come-ons are, refer back to #5 on this list.) If a couple cared about the size of your penis they would ask you about it. If you are asked, telling someone your cock is bigger than it is will not get you laid; it will only get you embarrassed when the time comes for play. If it is a big enough issue that the couple feels it is a prerequisite to ask it will be a big enough issue that they will not play with you when the clothes come off. You also need to know that if a couple does ask about your penis size they may not be worried that you are too small; they may be making sure you are not too big. Contrary to locker-room opinion, bigger is not always better for all women. While some women want 8-10 inches or more, for others this will only mean discomfort. Women and couples are all seeking different things. Be honest and the right playmates will find you regardless of how big, small, or average your penis may be. If this sounds contrary to some advice you may have read on a popular swing site, don't worry. The swing club is not a web site and the same rules don't always apply. Couples who are willing to hook up off a personal add directly form a swinger site are usually looking to have a specific fantasy fulfilled, and many times the fantasy is for her to take a "huge penis". Couples who are actually in the swing club usually have a different reason for being there than fulfilling one particular fantasy. In fact, experienced swing couples have probably lived out most, if not all, of their fantasies already. They are usually not looking for a specific penis-size, but quality individuals to spend time with. So, while the swinger sites are right when they state that having a very large penis dramatically improves your chances online, this is not necessarily always the case at a swing club. It may surprise you to learn that most couples on the swing sites have never actually swung! So of course they are looking to fulfill their biggest fantasies first. This is why you see so many profiles looking for the single lady (for him) or the big cock (for her). The simple fact is most real swingers have fulfilled their fantasies and, while they may have their preferences, are not set a particular penis size.
[b]8. Lay off the super-masculinity[/b]
This is a swing club, not a singles bar. The vast majority of people in a swing club are middle-aged, secure, well-adjusted couples looking for a quality encounter to enhance their sex-lives and relationships as a whole. Contrast that to the twenty-something, insecure, shallow, bad-boy seekers at most singles bars and it's easy to see that different techniques are required to be successful in the lifestyle. The single women at a swing club are no exception to this rule. If she was looking for the type of guy you find at a singles bar she would be there. Cocky gets you laid at a singles bar. Genuine confidence is what works at a swing club. Enough said.
[b]9. Don't try to be better than her husband (Unless you are acting out a cuckold fantasy)[/b]
You are not there to be the best lover she has ever had, boost your own ego, or make her tell her friends how much better than her husband you are. You are there to serve the couple. Trying to outperform her husband or be the best she has ever had will only put undue pressure on you and may actually hurt your performance. Further, if this is your motive, you probably don't belong in a lifestyle that is based on freedom, the love between a couple, trust, and friendship. The last thing the lifestyle is about is false-bravado or adolescent, male competition. As mentioned before, some couples have what is called a cuckold fantasy and if you are asked to act that out with them this is a different story; but understand you are still just role playing! The simple fact is you can't be better than her husband no matter how hard you try. You may have a bigger cock, be more physically talented in bed, or even make her come harder than she has ever come before, but you will not be better than her husband no matter how physically good the sex is. How is this possible? It's like we said before: Couples are in this thing for a variety of reasons, but the vast majority of real swingers share a deep emotional commitment and trust most "regular" married couples will never understand. The sex they have with you is only one very small part of the experience. They are going to look back on it, talk about it, re-live it, and it will deepen their bond. There is so much love and emotional growth and trust involved in this that a simple, physical act can never compete with the overall picture or the love she feels for him. He is showing her an extraordinary amount of trust by bringing you in, especially if you have a bigger dick, are more attractive, in better physical shape, or have more stamina. He loves her immensely to be giving her this erotic adventure and to be turned on by it himself to boot! It's really impossible to explain to someone who hasn't experienced it, but suffice it to say that the love and growth that is spawned by a couple sharing their sex lives with another is beyond almost anything you could ever imagine.
[b]10. When engaging a couple be respectful of the male[/b]
Even though the female is usually in charge, he is the gate-keeper. It is common etiquette to clear things with the male if you want to play with his wife. While some couples are "anything goes" and will swing separately all night with implied permission to play with anyone they want, many only swing same room or will want to make sure both parties are comfortable with the choice of partner beforehand. Being respectful of him will go a long way with her and will help convince him that you are a genuine, good person and the best choice to show his wife/partner a good time. Even if she swings solo and there is no interaction with her man on your part, always be respectful of him and remember rule #9.
[b]11. Always be respectful of the female and remember: It's ALWAYS about her pleasure![/b]
Always be respectful of the female should go without saying, but we'll say it here anyway. We really shouldn't need to explain this. In fact, if you feel like it needs explaining run from the lifestyle as fast as you can for the benefit of yourself and everyone in the lifestyle! Once you understand this (and we're assuming you do) the other things you need to remember are what we call the Golden and Platinum Rules of Swinging. The Golden rule is: "It's always about her pleasure." The platinum rule states: "In the event that it's not about her pleasure, refer to the Golden Rule." It's that simple. If you can follow this philosophy, everything else we are talking about here will come naturally. You will have better experiences, gain a great reputation, and be invited back to play over, and over, and over again!
[b]12. Find a club where there is not an over-abundance of single males[/b]
The fewer single males, the better it is for you. How do you find these clubs? Here's the secret:
1. Find a large, metropolitan area with a few big-name swing clubs.
2. DO NOT go to these clubs! The big name clubs in the big city will be full of tourists and hundreds of single men looking to get into the the lifestyle.
3. Find a swing club with a small devoted following in a small town or outlying area 20-60 minutes from the well-known clubs in the big city.
4. Attend a party at the outlying club. What you will find is quality swingers without the mass throngs of single guys just looking to get laid.
5. Use the advice you are reading here.
You may not live in an area where this is possible or that only has one swing club. Don't worry, the advice in this pamphlet will still work even in the big clubs or where there are a lot of single men. It just works faster when there is less competition. If you are genuinely interested in the lifestyle and not just getting laid, it may be well worth planning a vacation around this strategy and going somewhere with a lot of swing clubs large and small. Again, find the small clubs with devoted followings! Single guys usually go to the biggest clubs and the clubs in-town. 20-60 minutes of travel will eliminate 99% of the competition! We usually go to a small club (JJ Western Swing) in Pahrump, Nevada (which is near Las Vegas). Vegas is a swinger mecca with several big name clubs that draw national attention. The club we frequent is in the next county over and is about a 40 minute drive. There are very few single males there and the couples always outnumber them! This is never the case at a big name club that draws tourists. One night we attended a party at JJ's that had an abundance of couples, three single females, and not one single male. This is indeed rare and may never happen again but it did that night at a small club, near a swinger mecca, with a devoted following. One thing to be wary of when seeking these clubs: If a club guarantees you will get laid or that there will be more single ladies than single men you are not going to a swing club, you are going to a brothel. If you are just looking to get laid this may be the best option for you, but if you are genuinely interested in the lifestyle, you will not find it at the so-called "swing clubs" that make guarantees.
[b]Extra Credit: Expect rejection[/b]
No, you're not going to be brutally rejected like some awkward, high school dweeb asking the snobby-prom queen for date in front her friends. But you should expect some rejection. Why? Everyone gets rejected. Expect it and don't take it personal. Most people who are not looking to play with you will be very nice in turning you down. Single males will be turned down very often for a variety of reasons. Many couples are just not looking for a single male. The simple truth is, if you practice the previous 12 principles, you won't find yourself asking all that much anyway. Things will naturally progress and you will find yourself playing as the result of this natural progression. But if and when you do proposition a single lady or a couple, simply be prepared to hear the word, "No". We're not suggesting that you set yourself up for failure by any means. Just know that you will be turned down at times, and sometimes it will happen often. By expecting some rejection, knowing that it's a part of the lifestyle and that we ALL get rejected on occasion, you won't take it personal or let it interfere with your confidence; and confidence (not cockiness) is the key here. Rejection is not the end of the world. In fact it can be a good thing. When a couple lets you know they are not interested in playing with you, you can move on and not waste anyone's time or continue to enjoy some good conversation without the added expectation. No, rejection is not the end, it is simply a fresh start and a new beginning!
Welcome to the lifestyle and may your experiences be as fulfilling as our have been!

Any economists out there? - serious question about our economy - Hmm... politics, economy and money, hot topic or what? I am definately not an "economist" nor do I play one on tv. LOL - What I do believe in is my own power to control my "wealth or lack thereof." I will not rely on someone else, especially the government to take care of me, in my old age, and I believe I am only "entitled" to what I can make/create/contribute in this capitalistic AND free society. History has proven there is always going to be corruption, dishonesty and greed - just like the stock market, and economy has/will continue to fluctuate. We are not victims here, and there are good people in government who really do what they can (yes, I actually take the time to talk to my legislators on issues that are important to me) - my opinion is that the ones who actually do the work, do not reside in the white house. Ok, it's late and I will thicken my skin for making this remark but, if I were ever running for office my slogan would say "I will work my ass off like a greedy, money-grubbing Republican to actually help my fellow man, like a Tree-hugging, money-spending Democrat!":) Good night you sexy swingers!

Looking for a few good men - SM's to join SesSy group - [quote=UCANTOUCHMYMONKY]Hi meow,
Your post brings to mind a few points of contention among people in the lifestyle. Some would argue that swinging is implicitly a couples game and that singles of either Gender are not truly swingers. Positions from this camp range from a belief that singles of either gender should be disallowed from the lifestyle to those who believe that only single females should be allowed because of the greater degree of bisexuality among women than men. I can certainly acknowledge that bringing singles of one gender or the other into the bedroom is not the Desire of some couples, and those interested in encounters with single males are certainly a minority. With that acknowledgment, I can say that I also believe that swinging has a different meaning to every one involved in the lifestyle, and to borrow a term from a different thread, that meaning can be very dynamic in that it can change as different experiences in the lifestyle can open new doors and awaken new desires. For most this evolution of self discovery and self understanding is a good thing. I think a variety of choices within the lifestyle helps to promote this kind of self growth.
I would further contend that the definition of the swinger has more to do with one's personal belief systems then relationship status. case in point, relationships and both in and out of the lifestyle end. If a person has come to identify themselves as a swinger, are they any less so when they are no longer a couple? I think not. This brings up another interesting facet of the lifestyle as it continues to grow and evolve. In my experience it has become fertile ground for like-minded singles to meet, date and come together as couples. I much preferred dating single females from the lifestyle over vanilla women because we start out with far more in common with each other as the people we truly are. When I go out with a vanilla woman she always seems to be hiding behind some fa