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GCHQ ‘thought it was SNL’

Britain’s GCHQ has denied tapping Trump Towers :’There was no targeted surveillance. We can, however, confirm that a bored analyst was ‘channel hopping’ and had stopped to observe Saturday Night Live for a little light relief. It just took a little while before the mistake was realised.’

‘We can also reveal that the same error occurred this week under similar circumstances involving inadvertent intercept of the White House Press Secretary briefing. Our analyst immediately summoned his supervisor because ‘Melissa McCarthy had really let herself go’. At that point the monitoring ceased and the analyst was debriefed and a full aftercare package put in place.’

‘GCHQ takes very seriously the welfare of our staff. Operator A will receive trauma-counseling for exposure to disturbing content online and re-training to include our Special Relationship Module called ‘You knew our allies were assholes when you took the job’.’