Seinfeld is over, they're showing a teaser for the local news. Oh, now a Mazda commercial with...John Stamos? What? I don't know. Come on! I don't have the time or patience for these commercials. Now it's Honda. Let it be known that I hate all commercials. With a passion. A passionate passion. Now it's a Comcast commercial. *Fidgets with anticipation* WHAT?! Another commercial?! This one's for Dunkin' Donuts. Aaand, an Infiniti commercial. What is with the auto commercials?! BONESBONESBONESBONES HOUSEHOUSEHOUSE TEASER.
VIEWER DISCRETION. IT'S ON.

Oh, they replayed the end bit of Wannabe. Come on, Booth, no...

They're in the lab, and they're preparing for Booth's FUNERAL?! WHAT?! Bones is working with a 500 year old skeleton.

Sweets: It's Agent Booth's funeral. Coming to terms with the death of a loved one--
Brennan: A partner. He was my partner.

Angela asks Brennan to go to the funeral, if only for her own sake, as she'll need her best friend as a shoulder to cry on.

Now they're at Booth's funeral. Caroline is eulogizing him. Brennan is fidgeting. OHMIGOD. She has tears in her eyes.

OHMIGOD.
Brennan: That woman was aiming at me. I would have happily taken that bullet.........If there a merciful God, why wouldn't he have saved Booth?

Now they're doing the 21 gun salute, and some crazy guy just crashed the funeral. WHAT. The officer he's throwing down with is BOOTH. There was stuffed dummy in the casket!
OH. Brennan just DECKED Booth. As in, knocked him to the ground.
The FBI faked Booth's death to get some suspect. And now Brennan is all pissed because Booth's funeral was a "waste of time."

Brennan: Just know, I won't be attending your next funeral.
Booth: Bones, you were supposed to know that I wasn't really dead!

Sweets is explaining that the funeral made Brennan come to terms with her feelings for Booth. And Zach just presented Brennan with a package wrapped in brown paper.
It's a lower jaw with two silver screws in the box with it. There are tooth scraping marks on the jaw, confirming that it's another Gorgamon (Gormagon? wtf kind of fan!girl am I that I can't remember?!) victim.

Cue the theme song and credits.

__________________

Brennan/Booth//Bones House/Cuddy//House M.D. Luka/Abby//ER If you can hear, can I just say how much I want you to stay?

<Flashback to the shooting> Sheesh this is intense …
Brennan is talking about a skeleton with Zach.
Hodgins: It's time, Dr. Brennan.
Brennan ignores him and keeps talking about the skeleton.
Cam: That's enough. We're going. Now.
Brennan: I have remains to identify. He could have a family.
Angela: He's 500 years old. They've probably adjusted by now.
Brennan: I'm not going. I've already made that clear.
Sweets: It's agent Booth's funeral Dr. Brennan, losing a loved one is-
Brennan interrupts: A partner, Sweetws I lost a partner.
Sweets: Someone close to you <talks about a chance to grieve
Brennan argues her case
Sweets: Being hostile won’t
Angela shows her Booth’s image, and asks her to go with her because Angela says she can’t go to the funeral alone, she needs her best friend.
And Brennan nods.
Gah, it’s OBVIOUS how withdrawn and analytical she’s being. Poor Brennan. This is already breaking my heart.
At funeral – Caroline talks about Booth earning her respect and affection and that she doesn’t like many people.
2 weeks ago he gave his life saving his partner
Brennan argues to Angela that that woman was aiming at her, she’d gladly have taken the bullet
If there were a merciful god why wouldn’t he have saved Booth?
Brennan is standing there, so nervous, basically shaking her foot, unable to handle it.
Random guy comes up, there’s a fight with one of the security dressed up guys, the coffin is knocked over, it’s a dummy body. Brennan races over, gets the dummy arm, hits the guy. We realize that Booth is the random dressed up guy at the funeral.
Booth: Bones nice shot!
And she flat out slugs him in the face and knocks him on his ass.

Back at the Jeffersonian, Booth is racing after Brennan.
Brennan: I knew I shouldn’t have gone to that funeral. It was a complete waste of time
Booth: Wait a minute <something about her thinking it was a waste of time>
She argues, he explains the only way he was going to catch this guy (national security) was at his funeral. He explains there was a list, he gave the bureau, she was supposed to know. That’s why he thought she wasn’t crying.
Sweets: Striking Agent Booth was a very passionate act
Booth: Passion. Did you hear that?
Argue more, box arrives, jawbone from Gorgomon.

And we're back. Sweets is being interviewed on TV about the Gormagon murders, explaining Gormagon's goal, etc.
Booth is inspecting the platform, which is taped off because it's a crime scene. He says that he needs the identity of the owner of the jaw, and the squints duck under the tape and get to work.

Cut to Booth relazing in the bathtub with a beer can hat. Suddenly, Bones bursts into the bathroom and scares the hell out of Booth.
She's pissed about how Booth didn't tell her she wasn't really dead.

Brennan: ...you clearly have no concern for me.
Booth: I took a bullet for you!
Brennan: [something about how he only did it once, and once only goes so far]

Brennan won't drop the fact that she was out of the loop.

Booth: Fine. Next time I die, I promise to tell you.
Brennan: I look forward to it.

The markings on the mandible point to being gnawed on, but not by teeth. By dentures. The dentures were homemade. Cam calls Booth to tell him about the updated information. Hodgins and Zach decide to recreate the homemade dentures as one of their experiments.

Sweets is explaining the psychology behind the jaw and the screws. He's totally captivated by the fact that he was on TV. Then Booth starts a therapy session by bringing up how Brennan basically broke into his house the previous night.

Booth: Wait a second, Bones bursts into MY bathroom, and I'm weird for being NAKED?!

They cut to Zack and Hodgins, then back to Sweets, Booth, and Brennan.

Booth: It was my own bathroom. What do you wear [to take a bath?], floaties?

Zack and Hodgins just caused a SERIOUS explosion with their dentures experiment. Zach is pinned upder the blask poard. His hands are burned and mangled to a horrifying degree.

Cut to commerical.

__________________

Brennan/Booth//Bones House/Cuddy//House M.D. Luka/Abby//ER If you can hear, can I just say how much I want you to stay?

At Booth’s apartment, he’s in the tub, in a beer helmet reading a comic.
Brennan comes barging in. She turns his music off.
Brennan: I need to talk to you.
Booth: What the hell Bones? I’m in my house in my tub in my bathroom …
Booth: How did you get in here?
Brennan talked about the fake rock out front. Asks about beer helmet.
Booth talks about Hot tub plus cold beer equals I warm beer
Brennan harasss him about the cigar being very unhealthy
Brennan: You should have told me you weren’t dead
Argue about not following protocol
Brennan argued about protocol and how they’ve been partners for 3 years and how he’s broken protocol before.
Booth: I took a bulltet for you
Brennan: Once. That only goes so far.
Now he’s standing, naked, and there’ s this awkward silence.
Brennan: Would you like a towel
Booth lowers in tub
Booth: What is it that I should have done bones
Brennan: You could have called me
Argue more
Booth: Do you want me to find out why you weren’t told
Brennan: If it’ll make you feel better
Brennan: What are you reading
Booth: A novel it’s a graphic novel
Brennan: Just so you know I find your lack of modesty very refreshing
She leaves turns radio on.

They're in the ICU. Zach is talking, and he asks about Hodgins.
Brennan and Zach are competely frank about the severity of his injuries. His hands will never be the same, thus changing his ability to work.
Everyone's in his room. Cam says that one of the squints + Booth will be with him 24/7. Angela takes the first shift, and Cam writes up a schedule.
Brennan: I'll get you whatever you need to keep your job.

There's an FBI tech in the lab investigating the explosion. Hodgins is doubling the tests, as he obviously doesn't trust the FBI. Sweets is shrinking him. Sweets apparently went on Larry King AND TMZ to talk about the case.

The explosive component was tricycline oxalic hydroxide or something like that. It was in a mismarked container.

SWEETS was the breakdown in the communication chain. HE chose not to tell Brennan that Booth wasn't actually dead. Booth is trying to convince Brennan to slug Sweets. He justifies not telling her by saying it was a matter of National Security, and Brennan decides it's a good reason and forgives him. She doesn't forgive Booth though.

Brennan: I don't like pie, Booth....I don't like my fruit cooked.

Booth STILL wants her to slug Sweets. He says something about how something could be interpreted as seduction. Brennan is uberpissed at Sweets because they were the subjects of a psych experiment based on his not telling her about Booth. They're off to the Gormagon vault.

The silver skeleton is MISSING. Everyone's confused. ALL of the security cameras and sensors failed when Zach's explosion happened. At 12:03:22, everything failed. All security personnel had to take care of securing the accident scene.
Gormagon set up the explosion as a diversion so that the skeleton could be stolen. Gormagon is an insider at the Jeffersonian.

They don't have hair or prints or anything with the vault investigation. Cam is pestering, and Caroline intervenes. She says that Cam is a suspect, and Cam is understandably mad.

Booth and Brennan are at the Royal Diner. They're having coffee, and Brennan asks why Booth isn't having pie. Sweets enters and asks the same thing. He has a profile of the Gormagon.
IT'S HODGINS?! WHAT?!
Hodgins fits the profile. AND he's a suspect of the FBI. Brennan refuses to believe it, but Booth thinks it makes sense. Brennan points out that she fits some of the main points, but Sweets discredits it. Brennan leaves, very pissed off, and Booth follows, muttering at Sweets.

Cam believes that Sweets is the Gormagon. He showed up RIGHT at the Gormagon thing. AND he plays Booth and Brennan like a deck of cards. He's the only one that wasn't accounted for after the explosion. Cam wants Brennan and Booth to find hard evidence against Sweets. She's sure it's him.

Cut to commercial.

__________________

Brennan/Booth//Bones House/Cuddy//House M.D. Luka/Abby//ER If you can hear, can I just say how much I want you to stay?