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Thursday, 3 March 2011

Life On the Open Road...

At this time of year my thoughts move to holidays. Like every year before it, I genuinely believe that this year we will have a long hot summer. And with perfect weather comes the belief that we can have perfect family holidays and spend the summer months camping.

“You hate camping” The Husband said when I brought it up over dinner.

True, the last time we ventured out under canvas was two years ago. The holiday started out idyllically enough. That was before the gale force winds that had even the most seasoned of caravanners hoisting in their awnings and battening down the hatches. The tent leaked, the camp bed was uncomfortable and we awoke every morning to condensation covering everything inside. Add that to the long walk every time I needed the loo or wanted to wash up or have a shower or brush my teeth and the whole camping thing became very tedious very quickly.

But I must be missing something as so many of my work colleagues spend their long hot summer nights outside, sipping wine, listening to birdsong and picking at delicious food cooked over a fire.

So I have concluded that it is not the idea of camping that doesn’t appeal, it’s the method we have chosen to execute it. Camping is obviously something we would love as much as everyone else if it wasn’t quite so basic. The answer is obvious - we just need to upgrade a little.

“You want a motor home?” The Husband gasped incredulously. “Do you know how much those things cost?”

Getting a motor home seems the ideal solution. It would be the perfect little home from home, giving us the camping experience without the hassle.

Determined to convince The Husband, who by now had retreated to the safety of the garage, I set about dealing with the problem as only I know how. Make a list.

So here are my lists of pros and cons to owning a motor home;

Pros:

They are so sweet inside; just like little doll’s houses

We could take the dog on holiday. The Husband has pointed out here that we don’t actually have a dog but we could get one and take it on holiday.

We could go on holiday more often. Well in about 10 years we could when we had finished paying for it.

And onto the Cons:

They are very expensive. For the same price you could probably buy a small house in a foreign country. You may even be able to buy the foreign country.

It would not fit on the driveway.

Even the large ones are quite small inside.

You have to pack everything away every time you want to go somewhere in it. Being an Official Untidy Person, this could be quite traumatic.

It is too big for me to drive

You can probably only travel 2 miles to a gallon.

You would need at least 6 free spaces to park it anywhere.

So the motor home idea seems to have stopped before it really began.

And are we looking forward to a summer under canvas? Can’t stop, I just have to nip out and get some cruise brochures.