serious question to middle aged getbiggers:As i am getting older (35 now) it is harder and harder to not think and worry about future all the time - where i am going, am i at the right place, will i ever do a job i enjoy, what if i get fired, should i save more money etc-etc. I cant really enjoy a movie or a book anymore, i mean i cant forget the outside world during these, even if its the best movie or book ever. The same in teh gym: sitting between sets and thinking about things to do. Any ideas?

serious question to middle aged getbiggers:As i am getting older (35 now) it is harder and harder to not think and worry about future all the time - where i am going, am i at the right place, will i ever do a job i enjoy, what if i get fired, should i save more money etc-etc. I cant really enjoy a movie or a book anymore, i mean i cant forget the outside world during these, even if its the best movie or book ever. The same in teh gym: sitting between sets and thinking about things to do. Any ideas?

Really? I feel as I get closer to forty I feel less obsessed with the future and more comfortable in the moment.

I am 54 and I can seriously say from my own experience and friends and family my age that the biggest change in your body and mind come between 40 and 50. Nice thing is the little things that used to be so important or piss you off no longer mean shit. You only worry about important things like family and money.

I am 54 and I can seriously say from my own experience and friends and family my age that the biggest change in your body and mind come between 40 and 50. Nice thing is the little things that used to be so important or piss you off no longer mean shit. You only worry about important things like family and money.

You're probably right. Maybe I'm in the middle of a shift. I find I worry about my family a lot more and that not only takes the focus off my own problems but puts them in perspective. Things I thought were important dont seem as important anymore.

Job satisfaction: don't wait for a job you will enjoy. If you're driven to succeed, every job will have things that drive you crazy. Particularly if you're type A, and are intelligent. It's only normal. Look beyond that, focus on what you can accomplish, over-celebrate wins and derive satisfaction from them; don't dwell on losses or setbacks. It's a job at a company; they're not loyal to you. Be loyal to yourself. If you don't like it, find something else. But in simple terms, you'll probably never be happy unless you become an entrepreneur. But prepare to devote your life to it in order to win. Then you have to ask; do you have the nuts it takes to sacrifice all to win. Not an easy answer.

You get fired: big deal. Lots of people get fired...millions every year. You have only four choices: quit, retire where you are (good luck with that one), get fired, or die in the chair. Option B and D are essentially the same, and are unlikely. So prepare to quit or be fired. No shame in that. Your real question: have you prepared yourself with a guarantee of employability (not employment - employability). Is your skillset beyond reproach? Are you elite? Have you backed yourself up with an MBA or similar advanced degree that future employers will appreciate? Are you advancing where you are? If not, yes, you're in trouble, and you should worry about addressing this.

Should you save more: Yes. And when in doubt, the answer is "yes". Always save more. The problem with the economy and most individuals is lack of savings. This has been lost on Gen X going forward. 13 to 18% of your pre-tax income should be saved in appropriate vehicles. You're young enough; think aggressive. But when in doubt, invest in ETF where managemetn fees are minimized. Diversify: invest according to the global market cap value of various countries (i.e. spread yourself out across the globe). Put 80% in stocks, 20% in bonds...those sorts of rules of thumb for someone your age. Let compounding do the work for you. If you're savvy, do better than what I've recommended...good luck.

Then, having taken care of achieving or working to achieve those goals, enjoy today. Tomorrow is promised to no one. Don't die tomorrow having wasted today.

serious question to middle aged getbiggers:As i am getting older (35 now) it is harder and harder to not think and worry about future all the time - where i am going, am i at the right place, will i ever do a job i enjoy, what if i get fired, should i save more money etc-etc. I cant really enjoy a movie or a book anymore, i mean i cant forget the outside world during these, even if its the best movie or book ever. The same in teh gym: sitting between sets and thinking about things to do. Any ideas?

add in some kids and you've got yourself a real living hell with no fucking end in sight

serious question to middle aged getbiggers:As i am getting older (35 now) it is harder and harder to not think and worry about future all the time - where i am going, am i at the right place, will i ever do a job i enjoy, what if i get fired, should i save more money etc-etc. I cant really enjoy a movie or a book anymore, i mean i cant forget the outside world during these, even if its the best movie or book ever. The same in teh gym: sitting between sets and thinking about things to do. Any ideas?

You need a better mind frame. Stop wanting this and that. Desire is the root of all suffering. Just be satisfied with what you have. Be at peace with reality and yourself. People always say do what you love. Thats bullshit, if I could drink beer and fish all day that would be great, but the reality is I have to go to work all day. So instead of doing what you love, love what you do. You can't always choose what you do for a living, but you can choose how you do it.

Reminds of a documentary I watched last night called Comedian. It showed how this comic, Orny Adams, was so incredibly driven to succeed, yet even though he'd win little victory steps up the ladder of his career, he'd be just as miserable and depressed as ever. He was even aware of this, that if finally he made it someday, he knew he'd still be miserable - At one point he got a call to do the tonight show. He was so excited calling all his friends and family, then he says to the camera ''its been 10 minutes of joy, now I'm back to being depressed''. but the ego driven nature of the whole thing just had him in its clutches and kept him plugging along. Its a perfect example of how many of us live our lives. The ego and its desires are never satisfied, shameful way to go through life.

32 here. I don't want to sound like a curmudgeon, but some of what you are going through is going to happen even if you do get to where you think you want to be. IT never seems to be enough. I make decent money, run a successful business, am happily married, but part of me still wants more. It is a good thing sometimes, because it keeps you hungry, but yeah, it does suck to be in a constant state of worry.

You have to learn how to let things go and not worry about things you cannot control. I used to suffer from anxiety for years until i learned to just let shit go and not worry about tomorrow. Just focus on today and set short term goals as someone already said. You cannot change tomorrow, but you can change your attitute about today. Work hard and do your best, anything that happens along the way doesn't really matter in the end.

Best advice I can give from my 41 years on the planet:1) As long as you have a full head of hair and $100 burning a hole in your pocket, don't get married because the desire to bang different females never goes away2) There is no such thing as saving too much money3) Stay in shape as it always makes you feel good and its something you can control4) Never sweat the small stuff...You'll never make enough money, someone close to you will die, you will get into a car accident-this is called life and those are the things that happen so don't be surprised when they do

The gym seems to melt all my problems away and it is the only place I can totally block the outside world. I am more jacked then I have ever been, it helps with my aches/pains, joint and spine issues and the iron never talks back!

I think the gym is better then any drug. New goals are also key along with trying new things.