Date: Sat, 17 Feb 2007 04:13:11 -0800 (PST)
From: L meehan
Subject: Roman's Customizing - Chapter 19
Warnings and Disclaimers: See chapter 1
Matt relived the whole incident every night in his dreams.
He'd taken his place in the stands and tried to force himself to be
calm. Joe knew what he was doing. The starting flag was waved and Matt's
eye was trained on his brother's bike. Colors zoomed by but even at top
speed, he never lost track of Joe. He was having a good run. He was in the
middle of the pack and there was plenty of time before Joe needed to make a
move and distinguish himself as a pack leader.
Matt had even felt relaxed enough to buy something from one of the vendors
selling hotdogs up and down the aisle. He really wanted a beer. Joe let him
drink beer from time to time but he knew he'd have no luck getting one
here. The participants had finished their first lap around the track and
Joe was in the breakaway group still riding comfortably in the middle of
the pack. Matt knew his brother's strategy well. He wasn't really expected
to win but he wanted to have a decent showing to entice new sponsors and
qualify him for other races. Joe was performing much better than
expected. That's when he decided to make his move and challenge the
favorites; only he wasn't the only one with that same idea.
Joe made a break for the outside lane to pass the number one contender. At
the same time another racer made the same move. The wheels bumped and both
Joe and the other biker spun out of control. Joe's bike must of hit a ridge
or something because he and his bike were suddenly airborne. To Matt the
whole thing happened very fast yet played out in slow motion before
him. When the bike landed Joe went sailing tumbling uncontrollably with the
bike skidding and rolling behind him.
Matt couldn't remember how he made it down to the field so fast. One minute
he was in the stands and the next he was running towards Joe. It was Jim
and his brother David, who Matt and Joe had stayed with the previous year
that caught him and held on to him while paramedics assessed Joe's
situation. Joe's bloodied and pained face being carried past him was a
sight Matt knew he'd never forget.
Against the dark Matt opened his eyes panting heavily. He reached across to
the space where his brother should be. He sighed feeling the empty space
beside him. Each time he awoke, it took several minutes for him to make
sense of where he was and what had happened.
Joe wasn't there. He was still in the hospital recovering from the accident
that killed his biking career. His right leg had been shattered; he'd been
in a coma for several days. He'd suffered internal injuries as well.
Jim and David, Joe's friends, had taken charge and Matt was
grateful. They'd found a studio apartment close to the hospital for Matt to
stay in. They squared things with his job so he could take a few days off
and visit Joe. They even called Claire for him. Claire had visited
briefly. Though she and Matt hadn't reconciled, they did call a truce and
concentrated on Joe's needs. Claire was instrumental in finding out as much
information about Joe's accident and relaying the information to her
son. She'd introduced herself as Joe's stepmom. Joe's real mother couldn't
be tracked down. She was a free spirit still living the hippie life
style. For all Matt knew, she could have been in another country.
With his best friend Jim there, Claire was insisting the Matt come back to
Philly before school started. He knew he couldn't do that but didn't argue
with his mom. He decided it was time to consult with Jim about his
options. Matt wasn't dumb and he'd been doing the research every since he'd
found a job. He wanted to be with Joe and he was pretty sure he knew a way
he could.
Matt had a new routine now. Go to work, visit Joe, go home and crash. The
nightmares continued and each morning it was a struggle to make himself
believe that Joe was still alive and would be okay. Jim flew home and
promised to work on Matt's request. David left too, he would soon be
returning to college.
As painful as it was to see Joe so battered and bruised, it was infinitely
better than the other possibilities. Joe was awake, his recovery was slow
but he was his old self again at least mentally.
"When are you leaving to go back to school?" Joe asked one night when Matt
was visiting.
"I'm not," Matt said bracing himself for an argument.
"Mattie," Joe began to scold.
"I'm filing for emancipation," Matt answered firmly. "I'm staying here with
you."
"Was this Jim's idea?"
"No, it was mine. I know what I'm doing."
"Do you?" Joe wondered if either of them truly knew what they had gotten
themselves into. He couldn't help but notice the pattern of near tragedy
each time they'd tried to be happy together.
"I know you think I'm too young to know what I want, but I do." Matt knew
he sounded like a willful child trying to get his way but he had thought
everything through. His mom had thrown him out when she found out he was
gay. He couldn't go back to her and have her watching his every move. Joe
was what he wanted. They had a nice life together over the summer. He knew
they could do this, have a relationship. He wanted to give it a fair shot.
"It's not like we can go walking together holding hands and kissing
Mattie."
"How is that different from any other gay couple? Most are fearful to
openly display their affection for one another."
Joe laughed. His brother was too damn smart for his own good.
"Besides, nobody really knows us here. We can do what we want. Tell people
we're married."
"Mattie, I won't be able to support us for quite sometime. How are we going
to live?" Joe wanted to join his brother in his little fantasy but he
simply couldn't. There was a real world out there and Matt needed to
understand that.
"Jim helped me find a studio apartment. I have job," Matt insisted.
"What about school? I never finished high school Mattie. I don't want you
to end up like me."
"I'll get my GED, I'll go to college at night. This can work." Matt was
getting frustrated. It was all to clear that Joe didn't want him around.
"I'll have lots of medical bills and I don't have insurance. We just can't
do this right now Mattie. You need to go home."
"You're right, visiting hours are nearly over," Matt answered. Joe knew his
brother understood what he meant.
"God you're stubborn," Joe sighed.
"Runs in the family." Matt leaned forward and kissed his brother
lightly. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Mattie, you don't have to come everyday."
"I know," he winked. He gave Joe a lingering kiss before finally leaving.
Joe was secretly glad his little argument hadn't worked. He didn't think he
could go through the rehabilitation therapy without Matt by his side.