Damning an Angel

1. Part One

“Bella!” I called out to her, but heard no answer. I ran at a human speed, but only because six voices screamed mental warnings, to her burning truck.

Her truck was completely totaled, smashed up against a huge tree. Upon impact, it had caught fire. And I watched it happen. I was in so much shock that I did not react at all as she swerved to avoid a fallen tree in the road, flew past me, and smashed, screaming, into a tree. I suddenly remembered something she said to me two years ago.

“If you make us a Volvo pretzel around a tree, you’ll probably be able to walk away. “True.” I had smiled slightly. “But, I won’t be able to.”

No. No. She had to survive. She just had to. There was no way that she was allowed to just die. She couldn’t…I won’t let her.

I tore the door open, screaming her name frantically, desperate for an answer. Nothing. I reached inside to help her out, when the smell of her blood hit me full on. The impact was so strong it knocked me to the ground. I held my breath, and it helped a little, but the smell of it was still on my tongue. I ran back to Carlisle.

“Carlisle.” I gasped for air, hyperventilating in panic. “There’s so much blood…I can’t get near her!”

Do you need me to get her? I nodded, and he took off towards my angel, trapped in a burning truck.

“Jasper.” He was at my side in an instant.

Yes?

“How is she doing?” To a normal person, or even a normal vampire, this would have been an odd question to ask. But since Jasper could read emotions, he would be of great assistance. He looked in concentration towards the truck.

His knees suddenly shook below his weight, and I pulled his arm around my shoulder for support. He glanced at me briefly in thanks before looking back to Bella. He soon was mirroring her emotions. His mind was full of confusion and pain, extreme pain. His hand shot up to his hand and he gripped his forehead. He was working hard to keep up his connection with Bella.

I looked desperately into the blazing car, searching for Bella. My eyes fell upon her quickly, and I gasped at what I saw. Her head was bleeding badly, and, with the sharp impact into the tree, the car was crushing against her. I didn’t know how much time she had left. She would have to get to a hospital immediately!

“Carlisle, hurry.” I spoke quickly; the humans wouldn’t be able to hear me, but a nod from Carlisle, showed me that he did. I was looking back to Bella when Jasper gasped almost inaudibly.

“Jasper?” My voice was full of panic. His eyes were dead, empty. What had just happened to Bella? “Jasper? What…what happened?”

“Nothing. I sense absolutely nothing from her. I think she’s gone unconscious.” His voice was shaky and he still could not stand without my support. Oh no, Bella!

“Alice. Help Jasper.” And she was supporting Jasper in an instant. I took off toward Bella, barely keeping a human speed. Carlisle looked to me in surprise when I arrived next to him.

“I thought you couldn’t stand this much blood?”

“I don’t care. She’s hurt badly, Jasper says she’s unconscious. I will not just stand here!” I tore at the truck, breaking off piece by piece. My clothing caught fire, but I ignored it. It didn’t hurt as badly as the thought of losing Bella did. I finally reached her and, carefully, always carefully, especially now, I lifted her out of her seat, cradling her in my arms.

My poor Bella. Her face was burnt, her arms blackened, her hair full of black particles of smoke. Her breathing was shaky from inhaling so much smoke, and she was growing colder by the minute. I can’t believe I let this happen to her.

“Bella. Oh, Bella. Could you ever forgive me?” If I could have cried, tears would have been streaming down my face. I brought her to Carlisle, and he brought her to his car, carefully setting her in. He beckoned for me to come in the car, too. I did do without a thought. Carlisle pulled in the car to go to the hospital. I looked back and saw the other members of my family driving behind us. At the scene of the accident, firefighters had just arrived, and were beginning to put out the fire. I turned back to Bella and held her hand, crying tearlessly from the backseat.

Carlisle drove in the direction of the hospital, but passed the turn, instead, going straight. I glared at him from the backseat.

“Carlisle, this isn’t a time for a detour. Bella needs-”

“Bella,” he interrupted, a tone of authority creeping into his voice, “is my first priority right now, Edward.” His voice was sharp, and I clamped my lips together angrily. What in the world was Carlisle thinking? My anger lessened slightly when worry took its place; Bella’s heartbeat was growing unstable.

“Carlisle?” I knew he could hear it. He was closer than I was to her. He only shook his head slightly and kept on going. I growled softly under my breath.

“Edward Anthony Mason Cullen.” I stopped growling. He never used my full name. What on Earth was he thinking? “Do you not trust me?”

“I trust you plenty, Carlisle.” My voice was distant, distracted; Bella’s heartbeat had stopped for a few seconds. I started breathing again when it restarted.

“Then what is the problem?”

“The problem,” I was not really paying attention. My thoughts all centered around Bella right now. Listening to her jagged breathing. Worrying over her unsteady heart. I did not want to be arguing with Carlisle right now. Bella needed attention. “The problem is that Bella needs acre right now, and you know it. I don’t know what you’re planning, but I know you can hear her heart. I don’t know how much longer it will hold up. I don’t want to lose her, Carlisle. I can’t.” By now I was shaking, crying tearlessly.

Carlisle looked back at me. “I know, Edward.” His voice was calm and even, trying to soothe me. “I have her best interests in mind, trust me.” I sighed in resignation, and stared angrily out the window. I only then noticed that we were on the path to our house. I perked up, trying to read his mind.

You will see in due time what I am thinking, Edward. For now, it would be in your best interest not to try to read my mind.

Damn it. What was the point of being able to read minds, if I couldn’t use this gift? I pressed my forehead against the window and tried to calm down. Carlisle had something he was planning, and I just had to trust him. For now. If things got bad enough with Bella, I’m sure Carlisle would help Bella immediately, no matter what he was planning. I would not allow Bella to die. It is not an option.

We pulled up to the house, and I leapt from the car. Jasper and Alice pulled out behind us. Alice looked at me pointedly in the eye. I singled out her thoughts.

We heard everything, Edward.

I sighed. Of course they heard everything. “That doesn’t change my opinion. I stick by everything I said.”

I know what he is planning, Edward. And don’t even think about checking my mind for what it is. If Carlisle doesn’t want you to know yet, you should respect that. I nodded once, glaring at her. Look, Edward. Just promise me one thing. Hear him out.

“Fine.” I spat. I whipped around and flew to Bella, lifting her out carefully. Jasper, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, and Esme froze at the smell of her blood. Only Carlisle was still breathing. He was lucky he was so desensitized. I cradled Bella in my arms. Her heartbeat thumped unsteadily, the space in between the beats growing slowly longer. I ran into the house, panic creeping though my every molecule. I found Carlisle in the room we used as a dining room when humans came to the house. I set Bella gently down on the table. The others all filed in behind me. I walked around the table, until I was next to Carlisle. Alice went to his other side and handed him the small black box he held his medical supplies in at home. He took out a variety of tools, and began to examine Bella, checking her over for serious injuries.

Not good. Not good. It is just as I was afraid.

“Carlisle?” What is he afraid of? What is going to happen to my Bella, my angel?

Edward. I am sorry to have to say this. I know that you hate this topic, but right now it is inevitable.

No.

“Unacceptable. I refuse. There has to be something else.” No way was I going to turn Bella. There has to be another way. There just had to be.

“Edward.” Alice said calmly, soothingly. “It must be. I have seen it in countless visions. Edward.” I was growling softly. “It must be. It’s got to happen. If you don’t, she’ll…she’ll…die, Edward.” I flinched. No. I wouldn’t let her die. I couldn’t curse her to this eternal damning. I just couldn’t. But, would she really die? If she died, I couldn’t go on. Not knowing that I could have done something. But was turning her really better?

“I don’t…know.” I put my face in my hands. A feeling of calming washed over the room, but it did nothing to help me.

Edward. If you are going to save her, you need to turn her. Now. Carlisle’s thoughts echoed through my head, and I sighed.

“I’ll…I’ll do it.” I mumbled softly. Oh, why did this have to happen to Bella? Now she would be cursed with me. All but Carlisle left the room, though all had their thoughts with me. Most comforting. Rosalie’s thoughts made me angry rather than calm.

About time something happened to that girl. He wouldn’t have turned her otherwise, and that girl is really messing Edward up. So, yeah, I guess I’m kind of glad that she got so hurt. And no, Edward. I don’t mean the actual fact that she got hurt. I mean the fact that you are finally turning her.

I sighed. Carlisle looked at me comfortingly.

“I understand, Edward. Turning you was very difficult, for, as you well know, it was my first time trying to turn someone. I’ll be here.” His voice was soft, as if he was admitting some shameful fact about himself. Actually, his thoughts continued, I wasn’t sure I would be able to stop drinking from you. Your human blood was very sweet you know. You and Bella have something else in common, then. But back to the point. This will be difficult, Edward. That, I am not denying. But, I do believe that you will be able to do this.

“Thank you, Carlisle.” I whispered it, the air in my voice suddenly vanishing. I took a deep breath to try to calm myself. It didn’t help. In fact it made things immensely harder as the scent of her blood filled my senses. The monster in my chest growled softly. I shook my head to clear it. I had to keep control. For Bella.

“Edward.” Carlisle looked to me, his eyes telling me what I didn’t want to hear. The time was now. I had to turn her.

I slowly curled my lips back to expose my unnaturally sharp teeth. I brushed her hair aside, and whispered into her ear, “Can you ever forgive me?” I took a deep breath and bit into her neck.

It was delicious. Even better than I remembered. The monster in my chest erupted. I wanted to drink more. If only I could drink a little longer, just a little more, then I would be satisfied.

No. If I lost control, if I let my demons have their way, it would cost Bella her life. I forced myself to pull away, wiping my mouth on my sleeve. Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder.

Immediately after I pulled away, Bella awoke into consciousness, screaming. I cringed. Her screams tore my heart out. I had done this to her. I had done it. I’ve cursed her for an eternal life like mine, never to eat, sleep, or be human again. Bella screamed in agony as the venom slowly spread through her body. The process would take three days, Three days of torturous pain, and then it would be over. Just three days. I ran over to her and knelt beside her.

“Shh…shh…It’s ok, Bella. Only three days. Just three days and it will all be over.” I grabbed her hand as I saw the transformation beginning to show. I watched her burns slowly diminish until her skin was a dim pale.

And so it begins. I looked up to Carlisle, whose thoughts startled me. I had completely forgotten that he was still there with my worries over Bella.

“Everything will be fine, Edward.”

“I hope so.”

Bella’s screams brought my full attention back to her. Carlisle left the room for the two of us to be in peace.

***

“The fire! Someone put out the fire! Edward!” Bella’s voice tore me apart. I had not moved an inch since I had sat down beside her two days ago. Bella had already changed almost completely. Her hair had grown more silky and soft. Her skin, though it was slightly paled already, was as pale as mine by now. Her figure had grown slimmer, giving it a more filled out form. Her nails, before short and stubby from frequent chewing, were now long and normal. All that was left to change was her eyes. I shivered as I thought of her eyes, blood red from her human blood. It would take a year before they turned the golden color that animal drinkers had.

I jumped when Jasper knocked on the door. I laughed shakily. It had been a long time since someone has snuck up on me.

“Come in, Jasper.”

“Hey, Edward. How is she?”

“Today is the last day.”

Jasper walked around the bed we placed Bella in the first day and knelt down beside her. I watched him curiously.

I’m going to try to take some of her pain away by living through the last day with her.

“Thank you, Jasper.” That was brilliant. If Jasper took some of her emotion away, this wouldn’t be so hard on her. I watched him as he stared, concentrating, at her, when he went rigid. It was working. I felt waves of calm and peace spread throughout the room and, despite the situation, smiled. Everyone was so cooperative. No one asked me to anything. I could spend all my time with Bella. My smile widened when I saw her shoulders relax slightly, her twitching start to slow.

Finally, finally, the day ended. The transformation was complete. I sat by her into the early hours of the morning. At about three in the morning, she opened her eyes, gasping. I leapt up. She was awake!

“Edward?” She sat up in a non-human movement, and it disconcerted her. She wobbled, losing her balance. I caught her arm, chuckling.

“After all this, how is it you are still as clumsy as ever?”

Her eyes shot to me, and a huge grin lit up her face. I gasped. She was breathtaking, even more beautiful with her nearly translucent skin. “Edward.” She said happily.

She reached out with a hand, towards me. I took it and pulled her to me, holding her close, no longer having to hold back against her. She then pulled back, the most bizzare expression on her face.

"Bella?" My voice had a slightly anxious edge to it. She was examining her hand, taking in the now translucent color. She looked up to me, moving again faster than she was used to. I smiled warmly at her. Her eyes were still uncomprehending.

"Bella? Is something the matter?" My voice was unworried now, she was smiling slightly. She suprised me when she jumped up and ran out of the room. I jumped up, running after her. What on Earth? I was walking past Alice's room when her thoughts caught me off balance.

'Stop worrying, Edward. She's in here.'

I opened the door slowly, but I didn't see Bella. Alice nodded towards the bathroom. I smiled, walking into it. Bella was standing in front of the mirror, examining every inch of herself. She smoothed down her hair, examined her now long, beautiful nails, and simply beamed as she noted her translucent skin color. Ah. So that was it. She hadn't realized yet that she was a vampire.

I chuckled. "Found you." I murmered softly, placing one hand around her waist. I took her hand, pulling her closer to me. She still examined herself in the mirror. I reaned over to kiss her hair, when she gasped.

"Something wrong?" She looked over to me, her eyes playing through a million emotions. The one that startled me the most was fear. What did she have to be afraid of?

"All young vampire's eyes are red for the first year or so. It is the remains of your human blood." She calmed doen immensely after that.

"So." She looked up at me.

"Now that we are done with the examination, you should eat." For some reason, this excited her immensely. I looked at her curiously.

"I guess you can't deny me anything can you?"

I laughed. Oh yes. I told her before she could not see me hunt. "Sorry to dissapoint." I was still chuckling. "But we aren't hunting yet." Her face fell a small amount.

I smiled. "Carlisle brought us back something." I took her hand, pulling her out of Alice's bathroom. "I'll be right back." I promised. She looked immensely sad that I was leaving.

"Promise." I winked. I stepped out, closing the door behind me. I ran down the stairs, and out the door, running into the forest. I had to get where she couldn't hear me. I finally reached the river by our home, sat down, and began to cry tearlessly.