She
asked him to divorce her if he takes a second wife

Question

My
wife and i have discused me having a second wife and she sayes that if i
do then she would devorse me.we did not get married by the kafirs but we
do have a islamic contract. and there was no agreement on that contract
forbiding me from taking a second wife.so my question is .Is it permisable
for her to deny me this?And is'nt she making the hallal harram on me. my
wife is a good muslimah (I.S.A.) and she would respect a answer whith
proof. jazallahkum ma lakair

Answer

Praise be to Allaah.

If a man is
able to marry a second wife, physically and financially, and he can treat
both wives in a just manner, and he wants to take a second wife, then he
is allowed to do so according to Islam. Allaah says (interpretation of the
meaning):

“…
then marry
(other) women of your choice, two or three, or four…” [al-Nisaa’
4:3]

And this was
the practice of the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon
him), and of his Companions (may Allaah be pleased with them), but apart
from the Prophet, no one is permitted to have more than four wives.

It is well
known that women are by nature jealous and reluctant to share their
husband with other women. Women are not to be condemned for this jealousy,
for it existed in thebest of righteous women, the Sahaabiyyaat, and even in the
Mothers of the Believers [the wives of the Prophet
(peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him)]. But women should not let jealousy make
them object to that which Allaah has prescribed, and they should not try
to prevent it; a wife should allow her husband to marry another woman for
this is a kind of cooperating in righteousness and piety. According to a
hadeeth whose authenticity is agreed upon, the Prophet
(peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever pays attention to his
brother’s needs, Allaah will pay attention to his needs.”

The first
wife’s consent is not a prerequisite for a man to take another wife. The
Standing Committee for Issuing Fatwas was asked about this and replied as
follows:

“It is not
obligatory for the husband, if he wants to take a second wife, to have the
consent of his first wife, but it is good manners and kindness to deal
with her in such a manner that will reduce the hurt which women naturally
feel in such situations. This is done by being kind to her and speaking to
her in a gentle and pleasant manner, and by spending whatever money may be
necessary in order to gain her acceptance of the situation.”

Concerning her
request for divorce if her husband wants to marry another wife, this is a
mistake. But they should examine the situation, and if she really cannot
cope with living with another wife, then she can ask him for khula’ [ a
kind of divorce instigated by the wife, whereby she forgoes the mahr]. If
she can cope with living with the second wife, but it hurts her to do so,
then she should be patient and seek the pleasure of Allaah. Thawbaan (may
Allaah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger
(peace and
blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“No woman
asks her husband for a divorce for no reason, but the fragrance of
Paradise is forbidden for her.” (Narrated by Abu Dawood and others, and
classed as saheeh by al-Albaani, may Allaah have mercy on him).

If she bears it
with patience, then Allaah will make it easier for her and will expand her
chest (i.e., grant her peace and calm), and will compensate her with
something good. The husband must also help her by treating her kindly,
being patient with her for any jealousy etc. on her part, and overlooking
her mistakes. And Allaah is the source of help.