Friday, February 29, 2008

How do I discipline a child?

"The path to true discipline is to recognize and encourage the divine nature within all children." from Dr. Taniguchi.

How do we guide children properly when they show strong opposition?

Do not underestimate children's understanding of the truth. Do not think that using force or reprimands are the only way to reform a child. There is a divine nature within children. Divine nature is a Heavenly thing. It is "truth" itself. It is natural that "truth" complies with truth. Use reason with children as if speaking to an adult. If what you say is reasonable, children will surely be pleased to go along with reason. Nowadays very few parents reason with their children. They simply force their children to do what they tell them. If this should fail, they then resort to violence and punishment .

In order to develop clear creative thinking power in the minds of children, they must be trained from childhood to think for themselves and do things based on their own opinion.

If we shout and scream or even strike the child, what have we taught the child? We may have succeeded in suppressing the activity but at the cost of teaching fear and the use of violence in getting our way.

As Dr. Taniguchi puts it, "Children's lives are an exact replica of their parents'. It is impossible for children to live a lofty life, even if they are told to do so, when the parents themselves do not." The secret lies not in the use of force but in using reason and respect. Children reflect back to us the way we have treated them in the past.

As parents our job is not to control our children as if they were little robots but rather to nurture the inner good and help them develop the most important tools of life's journey which are courage, prompt decision and intuitional judgement.