The phrase is “All is fair in love and war” not “all is healthy in love and war.” But maybe it should be. The way a couple argues is a reflection of their relationship as a whole. Disputes are normal, nay, healthy even for all relationships. You are not the same person and will not always see eye to eye. Thank god, how boring it would be if we agreed on everything! Having a tiff shows us that we are both individuals with opinions and have created an environment that allows for a dialogue. But the way we treat each other in those moments is crucial to maintaining a respectful, loving partnership.

First of all, don’t argue to win. Often people can get so hung up on winning the fight they forget the objective is to find a solution. Remember you are both looking to work it out, find understanding and move on. Continue reading…

Communication is the topic of the day… and no I don’t mean texting, tweeting, trolling Grindr or inviting someone to play Candy Crush. I am talking about the way we interact with family and loved ones. Many of the ways in which we communicate with the people in our lives today stem from the methods used in the household we grew up in. Maybe you find yourself being passive aggressive or not speaking up even when you feel strongly about something. To understand why we act or react the way we do we have to look to our past. Continue reading…

Whether your parents are supportive of your lifestyle or disapprove, whether they are 3000 miles away or across the street they continue to have an effect on your current relationships… besides calling you at an “inconvenient” time.

The parenting methods used by the ones who reared us have an overwhelming effect on who we are today. Continue reading…

In the previous post we discussed the benefits of acknowledging your level of self esteem and where the basis of it comes from. Now, I think it the next step is to start working on it! It wouldn’t really be helpful if we were like , “You have low self esteem stemming from your childhood, too bad. Who wants a latte?” It would probably be more helpful if some guidance followed on how to rectify the issue, right?

Dolphins are amazing creatures. They are playful and loyal and they NEVER have to wax! But what sets them apart from most other animals in the kingdom is self-awareness. If you put a dolphin in front of a mirror it will begin to recognize the image as itself. That is a pretty incredible thing if you think about it.

As humans we too are self-aware. Where we differ from the majestic dolphins is that our self-awareness begins to, almost immediately, become intertwined with our self-esteem. I don’t know about you but I have never heard a dolphin ask, “Do I look fat in this blubber?”

How to be in a healthy gay relationship?

We are gay guys who felt like two square pegs trying to fit into a round hole when figuring out how to live as a gay couple. Many of the people around us weren't the best examples of how to live a happy fulfilling life, so we started this blog in an attempt to show the other side of a gay life.

We are on a continuous journey of growing in our relationship — and of course we have flaws and difficulties as any couple does — but it is through our vulnerabilities that we find our strength.