In the same series as "Welcome to the city", "Age of the shadow people", "Essence of a hero" and "The fairest summer" with which I've littered these forums for no very intelligent reason; this one is intended to be the first one. Guess it gives a kind of soothing feeling of at least getting somewhere with the shit. This one has a finished vocal part, and a guitar riff I can't play. Anyway.

[Sounds of machine guns and artillery fire, and building collapsing. And a reporter speaking.
"Sirens are howling, and I can hear bomb shells in the distance. People are walking around, no one really sure what to do. Hold on, I have a gentleman here. Sir, how do you feel right now?"
"It's a disgrace, that's what it is! This sort of thing can't happen, who's responsible? This can't happen..."
The last two words echo and fade, gently drowned out by an advancing tank.]

Your cowardice has turned into an altar
There you spill, the blood, of unborn infants
Bled white, stumble and falter
Comfort, hedonistic chants

This round has the devil won, yes
God hears the empty words and sighs
In exasperation

Ha, you feel better when you don't feel at all
Forgot that privilege isn't a rightThat's right, never felt need
Not me, always someone else
Who's there, the man on the street

Cause - of - death:
Violent impact of blunt object
From inside the head

No wonder I scare you, wimp
While human misery makes me old
You
You didn't even turn in your sleep

__________________

Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein

2010-04-09, 20:19

L,B'XXX

dsnt trust ne1 < 30

Join Date: Jan 2003

Location: Home is where the <3 is

Posts: 8,881

Pretty brutal sounding. This idea gave me chills from the interpretations I was getting.

Cause - of - death:
Violent impact of blunt object
From inside the head

__________________

My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!

2010-04-10, 14:36

Amadeus

Quantum.

Join Date: Sep 2005

Posts: 2,149

Yeah, the imagery is bit on the brutal side, though there's a more of a, well, call it an intellectual meaning to the lyrics. The backdrop to the whole story line is that something somehow went wrong with the world, though no one really knows what anymore; this piece does what you might call setting the stage by presenting the trends that ultimately made it possible to happen.
Like the part you mentioned - a coroner's report on the cause of death of humanity; willfully bludgeoning itself to kingdom come, the final violent impact of dull and blunt minds with too much power.

Anyway, thanks for the comment!

__________________

Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein

2010-04-11, 01:44

L,B'XXX

dsnt trust ne1 < 30

Join Date: Jan 2003

Location: Home is where the <3 is

Posts: 8,881

You're welcome. I try to dig a little deeper than what's on the surface with your pieces because generally you write that way. Those lines I pointed out were key in what I pictured to be such intense thoughts of mass screw-ups it would cause a head to burst from the inside out and for God to be exasperated would be some damaged drama going on.

__________________

My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!