Pages

Monday, April 4, 2016

A to Z of Grave New World 2016: C is for CRYPTID

Welcome to a Grave New World, where humans rub shoulder to shoulder with the monsters from folklore.

CRYPTID is currently the biggest rock band in the world. It's fourth album, Wave Motion Gun, is set to drop at the end of April.The band's members are all local to the Greater Cincinnati area and have been together for nearly nine years. Every year, they return to their home town to perform a special Halloween concert at Bogarts in the University Village section of Cincinnati, Ohio.The band is comprised of Alita Van Damme on vocals, Kris Potter on lead guitar, Alice Potter on bass guitar, Kirby on drums, and Theresa Meadowlark on keyboards. Kirby replaced their original drummer, Larry Pyle who overdosed on heroin right after the band recorded it's debut album, Sorcery and Super-Science. CRYPTID grew out of Van Damme and the Potter siblings' high school band, RACE BANNON.Alita, who is a documented psychic that has the gifts of astral projection and telekinesis, writes most of the band's songs with her best friend, Alice. Theresa Meadowlark is a dhampyr, a very rare offspring of a vampire and a human, the twenty-nine year old refuses to talk about her father in interviews. Several news agencies claim her mother, Maria Holden, was raped by Earl Cranston, a vampire who was killed in prison after being convicted of four sexual assaults when Theresa was four.CRYPTID rose to prominence on YouTube and has been masterful in its use of social media for self-promotion. They have been a transforming force in human/inhuman relations in the last five years and have become a voice for the current generation. Van Damme was even Time's Woman of the Year in 2014.

While on their first World Tour, the group was invited to meet with the legendary Baba Yaga in Russia and even held a private performance for egyptian political advisor, Pharaoh Ptolemy XIV of the Ptolemaic Dynasty. However, the group was briefly detained and accused of espionage while in China. The Chinese government claimed to have proof that Alita and Kirby used psychic talents to spy on a classified fighter jet in development. The Chinese produced photographic proof of the band spending at least three days off in the vicinity of the project. Tense relations between the U.S. and Chinese government persisted for over a week before the band was suddenly freed and escorted to plane waiting to take them immediately back to the States. The incident caused the cancellation of close ten performances in the pacific rim.

Last year, Rafael Casper, a columnist for the Washington Post, published Discovering CRYPTID: An Expose On The Best Intelligence Gatherers in the World. Casper's sources provide him with numerous leaked documents showing that Alita had C.I.A. training and that Kirby, was planted in the band by the Agency. The expose claimed Kirby is a talented telepath and necromancer and even insinuated that the band's original drummer, Larry Pyle, was murdered. Most damning was proof by the Chinese government's own Dragonspeakers, who are generally considered the most well trained psychic corps on the globe, of both band members using their talents and a copy of the settlement the U.S. offered China for the security breach.While Casper's book has remained a bestseller, his expose has simply amplified the mystique surrounding CRYPTID and cemented their popularity.