A man from the northeast trained a parrot. If you pulled his left leg, he would say “Hello”; if you pulled his right leg, he would say, “goodbye”. One day, the northeasterner suddenly wondered, if you pulled both legs of the parrot at the same time, what would he say? So, he gave it a try, and the parrot said to him, “Son of a bitch! Are you trying to kill me?”

Osama Bin Laden recently said China is the only country where terrorists don’t dare to go. Al Qaeda once dispatched five terrorists to attack China. They were told to bomb five different places.

The first, who was to bomb an overpass, got lost on the labyrinthine bridges;

The second, who was to bomb a bus, couldn’t even get aboard because the bus was too crowded;

The third, who was to bomb a supermarket, got his remote control stolen;

The fourth, who was to bomb a building, was stopped and badly beaten by the security guards, who took him for a migrant worker asking for overdue wages, and yelled at him “don’t come for your salary, and don’t you dare to appeal!”

The fifth, who was to bomb a coal mine, eventually made it, leaving more than 100 miners dead. But half a year later, he was executed by al Qaeda for “cheating,” since the incident was never reported in China.