Tonight we will count Day 35 of the Omer, which is 5 weeks of the counting. Day 35 is referred to as Malkhut sheh b’Hod, Shekhinah within Expansiveness. Shekhinah is a way of looking at Malkhut (meaning kingdom). When God or godliness dwells in one central location, you have a kingdom.

With each and every step, I try to hold myself with integrity and to put godliness in every interaction. There is an entire world out there that matters and depends on my integrity. Sometimes I struggle, but still I believe that is my responsibility to follow Gandhi’s saying and “be the change you want to see in the world.” If I consciously embrace a world of godliness than perhaps my steps will guide me to higher ground when climbing to higher ground is not an option.

To live in the bigger world, I have to remember to walk gently, to honor truth even when it hurts, and to constantly strive to be my best self even when I am dealing with the shadow of others. The world depends on people actively being the best they can be. As a mother, a teacher, a friend, a writer, and a human being, I have no choice but to always put my best foot forward.

Surrendering to life’s darkness isn’t an option, yet it is often how I feel when I battle the demons that exist around me. In every realm (personal and more universal) that I travel I see darkness, but it is my job to hold myself in light and to find others that endeavor to do the same. I am not an island; although there are moments that I feel like one. Reality is that it takes many loving souls to make the larger world a better place.

Will you join me? With each breath, I pray for Malkhut sheh b’Hod, Shekhinah within Expansiveness

Tonight we counted Day 34 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and six days of the counting. Day 34 is referred to as Yesod sheh b’Hod, Foundation within Expansiveness.

There is a huge world that surrounds us with infinite possibilities and enormous beauty. Acknowledging that beauty within a larger foundation is only the beginning of developing a strong relationship with what is. Foundations create order, in other words, ways to embrace the beauty that surrounds us.

As someone who consciously lives in the world, I can’t take the vast expansiveness for granted. I am responsible for honoring the expansiveness by doing my part to make the foundation strong.

Yesod sheh b’Hod is a reminder to always live like I make a difference. Walking gently on the earth by actively engaging in healthy life choices and Tikun Olam too.

May each of us built roots that carry all of us into all that is beyond us.

Tonight we counted Day 33 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and five days of the counting. Day 33 is referred to as Hod sheh b’Hod, Expansiveness within Expansiveness.

Expansiveness in all of her Glory: Photo courtesy of Shai Gluskin

Hod can be explained with a multitude of words including expansiveness, prophesy, glory, empathy, thankfulness, and being fully present. Each word leads to a deeper and more full understanding of Hod. To fully absorb Hod, one must be fully aware of the realities with an openness to the truth of what one is seeing or experiencing.

Hod sheh b’Hod

All my life, I have been intensely aware of the world around me. The intensity permeates every cell of my body. With that awareness comes a spirit that tends to walk gently while being a human barometer of sorts. Over the years I have learned to remain present without experiencing the deep emotions that others feel. Self preservation is a necessity when you walk in the world as I do. At the same time, I value so much of what is.

Hod squared

Being open in this way means that you not only trust what you know, but you are also open to the fact that there are always moving parts. What you know one moment might evolve the next minute. When we are fully present, we are also aware that nothing is truly permanent; everything changes with each passing moment.

May we be present to the vastness that surrounds us as we navigate the world with all her moving parts.

Last night we counted Day 32 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and four days of the counting. Today is referred to as Netzach sheh b’Hod, Endurance within Expansiveness.

Did you look at the full moon last night? Amazing. . .truly amazing!!

Photo courtesy of Wicca Davidson

There is something about the moon that always touches me deeply; I love watching her cycle, feeling the guidance of her light, and feeling her soothing energy. Each and every time I see the moon in all of her expansiveness, my heart beats a little faster and peacefulness seeps into my heart.

The moon has always been my comfort, my confidant, and my constant. The moon is simply always there to nurture my spirit. When I struggle with life, I feel supported through all that I am navigating; the moon is soothing my spirit with her gentle light. When the moon is bright, her light joins me as I chant from my heart; when the tears start to flow, I don’t have to hide them. Quite simply the moon is with me every day of my life and always has been.

Life is full of gifts and challenges, light and dark times, beauty and ugliness. Reality isn’t always easy; reality isn’t always hard. Having the moon guide me through each and every night makes it possible for me to thrive as I do. Her light warms my soul and illuminates my core.

Tonight as you look at the moon, feel her essence illuminate yours.

helps me remain open to the possibilities that surround me. The muted light connects me to the world with a realistic light for

Last night we counted Day 31 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and three days of the counting. Today is referred to as Tiferet sheh b’Hod, Beauty, Balance or Harmony within Expansiveness.

Have you ever noticed how some days just work? All of the pieces of life’s puzzles come together as you would like and challenging moments don’t really trouble you.

Tiferet sheh b’Hod

Each of us have a story that makes us who we are at any given moment. We have trials and tribulations; we have gifts and challenges happening at nearly every turn. We have a past, a present, and a future. Life always has a lot of moving parts and for the most part, we have a choice on how we experience the moving parts.

(Note: I do realize that tragedy never feels good and loss can be devastating. And in the midst of pain, life can feel like hell. From experience, I realize that awareness or insight comes only after the harshness of pain eases over time. While I believe we have a choice how we walk through life’s darkness, we might not have a choice during the initial spark or as a disaster is absorbing our essence. The choice will come days, weeks, months, or even years later when we have an opportunity to look back and find moments that worked or new ways to absorb the blow of reality.)

Storms come and go. Life happens and sometimes we have no control. If we open our eyes real wide, we might find the rainbows that happen after the storm. At those moments, I am always amazed that regardless of how I feel part of the larger world and I see the beauty that surrounds me with an open heart.

Tonight we counted Day 30 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and two day of the counting. Today is referred to as Gevunrah sheh b’Hod, Strength or Discipline within Expansiveness.

Lately I have been struggling to maintain a strong foundation. There are so many reasons for this and with each reason comes frustration. Yet even with my frustrations, I am still awed by the land and the skies that surround me in Tucson. The beauty often grounds me and reminds me of my place in this world. Life is what it is, but in the whole scheme of things, my foot and knee will heal, my schedule will not remain this crazy forever, friends will become a more active part of my life, I will make time to exercise on a regular basis. . . the list goes on and on.

I am so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing nature. Remembering to acknowledge the vast beauty brings me down to earth and sustains me internally. My challenges might feel overwhelming, but they are actually quite small. I truly have what I need and I can create the world I want, I just have to do the work. When I take time to engage in the world around me, I begin to return to a more solid foundation.

Today, I nurtured my spirit. I found the discipline to step out of the darkness and to gain stronger footing. Early in the morning, I went hiking with Aryeh, I had some sweet moments with Dovi, I chanted, I took time write (twice) and now I am listening to good music at my favorite writing place in the world. Even with my knee swelling, I am feeling stronger today than I was yesterday. Allowing myself to engage with life (all of life) is the gift I give myself. I even saw a friend for tea and visited with friends at the local JCC and Federation.

Today’s gift was allowing myself to step outside of myself and to engage in the beauty of nature, people, and writing. Creating the space for the Gevurah (the discipline/strength) to thrive as my entire being stretched out from the darkness towards the light.

Last night we counted Day 29 of the Omer, which is 4 weeks and one day of the counting. Today is referred to as Chesed sheh b’Hod, Loving-kindness within Expansiveness.

Hod or ExpanivenessBecoming at One with the Expansiveness that surrounds us.Courtesy of Jennifer Judelsohn artist, social worker, friend

There is an amazing world that exists outside of what we know and understand; we are part of a larger universe, an expansiveness. Each night as I look into the Tucson skies, I am dazzled by the pure beauty that surrounds me and by the responsibility I feel for what I see and how connected to all that is I am. Chesed. Walking gently, making healthy life choices, connecting with the world around me are all responsibilities that come to me as I face the expansiveness of all that is.

May each of us find a way to become at one with the expansiveness that surrounds us.