“Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”

I can not tell you who said this quote first…To be frank… I do not think anyone knows who said this quote first. All I can tell you is I have heard it more than once in my life and it was something that always meant a great deal to me.

At the start of 2012 I was suspended from my regular job and forced to take a week to myself. Rather than worrying about how I was going to pay bills or what was going to happen when I got back to work (if I was going back at all) I decided to leave town. Four hours after my boss called me to tell me I would not be working for a bit, I packed up the essentials in my car and hit the highway. I had no idea where I was going, or what was in store for me, all that I knew is that I was going to “find myself.”

Driving the highways at night is something I have done my whole adult life. I love the night air, load music, and the open road. I remember driving and thinking to myself, “It is time to figure out who you are and what you are about.” I knew deep down I was a musician, I was a writer, and I was an artist…. but I did not know how to be all those things “for real.”

After driving for 3 hours I found myself on the coast. I decided to sleep in my car that night. There was plenty of space, all I brought, as I mentioned, were the “essentials.” To someone like myself the essentials are a bit different. I packed one small bag of clothes, a guitar, a laptop, and a camera. That was all I needed.

Within the first 12 hours I felt at peace within myself. I decided to drive to random cities that I loved, wanted to visit, or got a great review on google. Each day I spent soaking in the sun, meeting people, writing, playing, and loving life. At night I would either check into a cheap motel or sleep in my car while mapping out the course to the next city in the early morning. I made it a point to leave town each day at dark before the sun came up for one key photo related reason.

I have always had a passion for photography. I have never taken a class but decided years ago to buy a camera and software to learn on my own. As I got more into photo I realized something profound about the time of day photosought to be shot. My “theory” was later confirmed by a photographer’s testimony in National Geographic. The theory was that, “The best photos are caught at sunrise and sunset. These times of day have the most colors in the sky and set a certain “mood” to what is on the other end of the lens. Knowing this was how the professionals shot, I made it a point to google the exact time of sun rise and sun set each night in the city I was going to travel to in the morning so I could have the optimal photo shoots.

It was now day 3 and I was on my way to Santa Barbara. I was flying down the highway and caught two bridges to my right which were parallel to one another; one meant for walking and the other for trains. I thought, “how symbolic.” Two paths going the same way but totally different and independentfrom one another. I decided to camp there to get some shots. I ventured over the hill to the end of the cliff. I had to be careful because it was very steep and one wrong step would have brought me to an early death. To my surprise when I got to what I thought was the “perfect spot” someone else already was there. On the edge of the cliff was a man in his 60s with camera, tripod, and all. Rather than moving I decided to get close to the edge with him and strike up some dialog. We began to speak about art, photo, and life almost instantly. I asked him what he was doing here. He told me about 3 years ago he quit his job, bought a bunch of photo gear and now does photo full time. He told me, “He had slaved away his whole life without passion and it was time for him to satisfy his soul.”

This man inspired me on a level I can not even tell you all. This man was doing something I wanted to do, but never thought about. This man was actively creating himself. This man did not quit his job to find his new path in the world. This man followed his heart and created his path.

I felt honored to sit next to him taking photos all morning. It was a block of time which felt like an eternity. All I could think about was, “If I did not get suspended from my job I would not be here, I would not be out in the world creating my life.” I felt very blessed, more so in such great company. Once I was ready go leave, I shook his hand and he said, “By the way, I run a gallery now. If you ever want to send me some of your work I would really like that.” I had no idea what to say. The man saw me as a photographer I knew on the inside I was. I asked him, “How do you even know my photos are any good?” He said, “Let me ask you something instead. Why you are here on this cliff?”

I said, “If a good breeze comes we are both dead. I would have taken shots from the street if I did not feel I was an extension of my camera capturing the art of the world.” He just smiled and told me it was a pleasure to have met me.

After leaving the mans side I climbed back into my car and headed south. The rest of my journey had a whole new feeling. I felt alive and connected to myself. I felt that I no longer needed to “find” myself, but rather “create” myself.

After spending the next few days sleeping on beaches, watching the sunsets, going on art walks through galleries along the coast line, and meeting old friends I decided to make my way back up north. I had about 36 hours before I was to be back at work, at least talk to my boos about coming back, and I did not care. I was happy, and I felt alive. I told myself, “Whatever happens does not matter. My job is not who I am, I am who I am.” If I lose my job, I am going to create a new one, and if I do not loser my job I am going to focus all I am on just creating.

On my way back up north I decided to spend the night before a massive driving spurt in one of my favorite cities. Arriving in Newport Beach brought back strange memories, but I knew that I was going to find something special there. I was in the main “mini strip” area when I saw a very unique boutique I did not recall existing a few years prior. This store was filled with the most eccentric art I had ever seen. I spent over 2 hours looking around as all the items were made by local artists. On the back wall were books. Books on various topics like, Zen, Happiness, and the Secrets of the Heart. Next to these very interesting books were journals. Long behold one journal stood out to me over the rest. It was a black book with lined white pages and was as simple as could be. The best part was what it said on the front in massive white letters. The journal said….

“Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” (Pictured to right is my exact journal)

I was blown away. Not only did I buy this book but I have been writing all my creative thoughts down in it since. This book is what I call my “projections for my creative future journal.” It holds details to projects I am working on, ways to embrace being a person of creation for life, and journal entries of what I have learned since my journey the very first week of 2012.

Once getting back to my home town my life changed. I was not the same person. I returned to my job but felt differently about everything in my life. I was not going to try anymore. I was not going to lookanymore. I was not going to worry anymore. After my journey I knew that I was an artist, and I was going to spend my life creating. I knew that for a while my creations would be for me. The music would only reach my ears, my words would only reach my eyes, the ideas would only reach my conscious mind…. but one day…

One day I knew that my creations were going to be in the world. I knew that if I was true to myself I was going to make an impact on the world. I knew that if I stopped looking for things, and just createdthings all would be alright.

It has been over a year now, and I can tell you all…

The day i stopped looking for “everything.” was the day my life changed.

I want to wish you all love tonight and leave you with this….

Live your desires, create as much as you can, and dedicate all that you are to embracing “all that is you.”

Who knows…. maybe one day we will all be like the man on the cliff next to the two bridges….

Maybe we all will leave our lives of unhappiness behind and create lives of passion. Life is not about finding yourself…. Life is about creating yourself!

Written by: KrissA Licensed People Polarity Original WorkCopyright 2013. All Rights Reserved