Sunday, May 12, 2013

Blessed to be a Mom

This
is by far my favorite picture of my miracle boys. We were on our way
home from somewhere way south, and they were getting cranky and were
ready to be home. They did NOT want to go stand in a field of
sunflowers for their mother to take a picture. But they obeyed.
They even posed nicely for me. “Can we at least shade our eyes?”

Happy
Mother's Day to all the mothers out there. And to those of you
desperately wanting/trying to be mothers, I cry for you this morning.
My road to motherhood was a long and windy one with three lost
angels along the way. I didn't think I'd ever be a mom, and mother's
day was the hardest day of the year for me.

Yet
here are these beautiful gifts from God, The Transporter born almost
dead (9 pounds 10.5 ounces, I'm 5'3”) and in NICU for 5 days. Our
Youngest Teen (OYT) a preemie, but still a healthy 7 pounds 10
ounces, after a high-risk pregnancy which I spent on the couch,
verbally chasing my toddler around the house...

They
give my life purpose, and joy, yet frustration and hurt. It's the old "without the rain, we can't enjoy the sun" - an
adventure I'm blessed to be a part of.

The
best advice I ever got is, “The days will seem long, but the years are
so very short.” It got me through the bodily fluid years, and now
it makes me cry when I consider how soon my house will be empty.

My mom has endometreoisis. She found out she was pregnant when they were doing the tests for her to go in for surgery, to be able to get pregnant. I was high risk and born a month too early, but I was healthy. I've always told her Happy Mother's Day and done whatever I could to help her celebrate, but I never realized how hard she must have taken it when she was told she would never have kids. I'll be sure to keep that in mind. Thank you and Happy Mother's Day.