TOP 5 THINGS ABOUT DISNEYLAND!

As you all know, I've been using your input and SCIENCE to determine the Top 5 Things about each land in Disneyland and share the results right here. But then over the weekend i thought "Why introduce the element of Human Error to th equation when I could just turn the entire project over to the hive-mind data of The Internet?" And so that's what I've done, writing a simple script that mined data from 7 different major search engines and ran it through my Disnescinetographicationator so we can get to the ROOT of what makes Disneyland so great!

NUMBER FIVE:WAITING IN LINE! When you're really tired and just need a break, there's nothing better than waiting in line for a minute or ninety!

NUMBER FOUR:UNEXPECTED BATHROOM CLOSURES! What a great opportunity to experience a brisk walk through the park with your butt cheeks clenched tightly as you search for the closest open restroom!

NUMBER THREE: PEOPLE WHO REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE AT DISNEYLAND BUT WERE DRAGGED THERE BY THEIR FAMILY SO THEY'LL MAKE SURE NO ONE HAS A GOOD TIME BECAUSE THEY ALL NEED TO BE TAUGHT A VALUABLE LESSON ABOUT TRYING TO MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY AGAINST THEIR WILL! Because SOMEBODY needs to make the kids cry! Speaking of which...

NUMBER TWO:CRYING KIDS! I love this part SO MUCH, I'll even pop balloons, knock ice cream cones out of hands and/or poke kids in the eye when their parents aren't looking just so I can get that perfect Disneyland Sound Experience going!

NUMBER ONE:EPCOT CENTER! Who doesn't love seeing that great big golf ball in the center of Disneyland?

(In case you hadn't figured it out yet, yeah, this is an April Fools Day post... we will return to our regularly scheduled Disneyland Appreciation tomorrow) :P