Painkiller

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Why?Because it's good for what ails ya

Some people think tiki’s all about the decor, the little paper umbrellas and sex on the beach; for others, it’s the storied Polynesian history. Our guess is that Easter Island was probably wiped out by a rager with too much bottom-shelf liquor (resources were tight in the 1860s).

Such a scene is not likely at the Lower East Side’s newest shady (literally, no windows) drink den, Painkiller. The Richard Boccato (Dutch Kills) and Giuseppe Gonzalez-backed bar is an urban riff on tiki: the drink menu gives dirty classics like the Mai Thai and Zombie a top-shelf makeover and lifts the Scorpion Bowl from the provenance of strip-mall Chinese restaurants.

Appropriately, the decor is equal parts bamboo, color-shifting lights and graffiti by local street artists. Keep teaming up on Scorps and it’ll be sunny when you stumble home -- just like on other, more tropical islands.