John Walsh: We seem to have lost our link up to the South Park crew, so I guess we'll going to our feature movie, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?Narrator: Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Was it- Jimbo? Mr. Garrison? Chef?

Cartman: Hey, who's screwing with the lights?!Narrator: Who IS screwing with the lights? Is it: Barbrady? Or Jimbo? Or the 1991 Denver Broncos?Cartman: (to Kenny) That is really starting to piss me off!

Mayor: My God, what a harrowing tale of human drama this is. All of us doing what we must to survive.Jimbo: It is amazing what people can do under stress. Just look at the pyramids. Nobody knows how they built those. Or who.Narrator: Who built the pyramids? Was it- the Babylonians? Officer Barbrady? Samaritans?

Jimbo: Well, looks like we're not going anywhere for a long time.Director: We're snowed in?Mayor: Yes! We're trapped!Mr. Garrison: Like sailors on a submarine...Mayor: My god, this is the worst storm I have ever seen!Director's Assistant: Oh, I have to get out of here; I haven't eaten since breakfast.Officer Barbrady: Yeah, I'm getting kind of hungry, too!Jimbo: I hope you all don't realize what we're facing here... Our only option might be to...eat each other to stay alive.(Everybody in the building gasps in horror.)Director: Uh... It's only been, like, four hours... Aren't you people resorting to cannablism a little quickly?Jimbo: That's a while to live, Mr. Director. I don't eat plenty, but if some of us must die so the rest can stay alive so be it.Mayor: But...how do we decide who?Jimbo: Well, we'll draw straws...Director: Now, wait just a minute! You've all had a big breakfast! Can't you people live without eating for a while??Jimbo: Calm down, soldier! We need every person here to keep his head! Barbrady, fetch some straws.Director: Well, who the hell made you the boss, anyway??Announcer: Who the hell made Jimbo boss? Was it: Officer Barbrady? Chef? Mr. Garrison?

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Jimbo: Alright, so far everyone has a long piece of straw. We'll keep drawing(Jimbo picks a piece of straw.)Jimbo: (relieved) Whew!(Mr. Garrison picks a piece of straw.)Mr. Garrison: (relieved) Whew!(Officer Barbrady looks at the last piece of straw in his hands.)Officer Barbrady: Whew.Jimbo: Wait a minute! Where the hell is the short one??Officer Barbrady: The short what?Jimbo: Damn it, Barbrady! When you draw straws, you're supposed to have one of them short! That's how you decide who loses!Officer Barbrady: That's not how I played itMr. Garrison: Oooh, can we hurry this up? My stomach is growling

Chef: Doctor, we've got a shot-cracker outside!Doctor: I'll be right with you in a minute, right after I inject this man with a long needle.Stan: Oh, man. I'm gonna be sick...Doctor: There there, young man. Medical science is nothing to be afraid of. (injects the needle and Stan groans)Nurse: Ooh, I think you're hitting the bone...(Stan groans again.)Doctor: Yes, I can feel the needle scraping in there.(The patient starts bleeding.)Doctor: Oop! He's hemorrhaging.(Blood lands near Stan as he leaps away and shrieks; the patients head then falls off.)Doctor: Oop! His head fell off!Stan: (running away) I'm getting outta here!Kyle: Stan!Doctor: Well, some people just have a weak stomach.