You People Are Mental.

Hello, world. How do you do? Me? I’m grand, thanks for asking. I found this awesome little feature this WordPress thing can do yesterday. It lets you know all the terms people have searched my blog for since forever. They range from just a funny combination of words to times I think people have accidentally searched my blog instead of Google. These people are filthy. I’ll start with the #1 searched for thing on my blog:

“dog smoking fag”

Close. It was actually a crab smoking a fag. 142 of you thought it was a dog. Or just one of you was adamant it was a dog. The next one isn’t so exciting. It’s just my name, but the third one?

“cunt”

Six times people have searched my blog for one that mentions the word ‘cunt’ and I bet you every single one was pleasantly surprised. The next two aren’t so great either, when suddenly something arouses my curiosity. A name. a name I have never heard before but fell in love with in an instant. this is the first example of when someone accidentally searched my blog, thinking it was Google, for something to wank over:

“lacey banghard”

I shit you not that is a real name. I had to Google it for you. She’s a model and she’s pretty hot. I’m trying to find out if that’s her actual birth-name because if it is I want to send her, and her parents, a prize. One second…

It is! Brilliant. But she just recently did a photoshoot for fuckingPETA so she gets nothing. the next few aint so good. there’s one that just says “scared rage” and that keeps tickling me, but it’s when we get into the world of one-time searched things start to get rather peculiar indeed…

“im fucked indecent images”

Now, I don’t know who you are, but I can safely say this this is not the sort of thing you should be doing, be it you’re fucked or not. Most aren’t as weird as this though. For example: