I'd rather be having a quiet drink... and can be followed on Twitter @alcothusiast; and friended on Untappd (handle: "neilcake" - all welcome).

Tuesday, 6 December 2016

Winter, Christmas and Festively-Themed Beers Challenge

It's December! And despite not really being the biggest fan of Christmas, this is usually about the time I find some Christmas-themed things to write about. Then the month culminates with my highlight of the year; my actual highlights of the year, in the guise of the Spirits of the Year post. Last year I even added a Beer of the Year award, so that's something else to look forward to. I'm starting off this festive season with a challenge I - and a few others - undertook last Christmas...

You
don’t just complete a year long slog like the Distinct BeersChallengewithout replacing it. But what do you replace it with?
Well, do you remember how I followed up two posts about the Distinct
Beers Challenge with a post about Christmas themed beers? That’s
right, a Christmas Beers Challenge. That is, drink as many
beers that have some connection to Christmas as possible. Not just
winter ales. No, there definitely has to be something
Christmas-related about it – a punny name like Yule Love It,a
cartoon reindeer on the label, the specific notice that said beer is
a Christmas beer…

It
got complicated early on because I received an early Christmas
present of three festive ales from Staffordshire Brewery. One was a
Christmas Day ale, one Boxing Day, and one New Year.
I asked for a ruling from the other competitors, and the scope had to
be widened to include anything that could be identified as a winter
ale and any beer of an obviously festive or wintery nature, drunk
between the start date of 27 November and 31 December 2015.

Normal
Stella Artois with holly on the label wouldn’t count, but should
Fosters rebrand themselves Frosters for the period, that
would. Pumpkin beers were also allowed, though I can’t say I was in
agreement with that. So as a direct result of Untappd and more
specifically, the Distinct Beers Challenge, I had gone from
deliberately avoiding these kinds of beers, to actually looking
forward to being able to get them. It’s strange where your life
will take you.

I
started my campaign with Had Enough Brewery’s Grumpy Santa Beer,
which is a classic of the genre – playing on the bah humbug
theme and featuring a comic image of a grumpy (and probably
alcoholic) santa on the label. It was listed on Untappd as a
golden ale. I scored it a 4.

After
the three Staffordshire Brewery ales (the Christmas Day and Boxing
Day ones each scored 4, while the New Year one scored 3.5), I called
at Aldi, picking up Sadler’s Reigndeer, a misspelled winter
ale with a reindeer on the label (which scored 3), then at Asda where
there were no Christmas themed beers and finally Tesco, where Mrs
Cake pointed one out that I had had already, but eschewing that one,
I did manage to find Oakleaf’s Christmas Ale, packaged in
its own tube, and worthy of only 2.5 out of 5.

I
would be travelling to Canada on 11 December, so I was hoping that
Christmas themed beers would be a thing over there, that would give
me the edge on everyone else. I found a few more on a night out
before heading across the atlantic, including Osset Brewery’s
Nervous Turkey, which managed 3.5. I decided not to count
Treacle Stout as, when I thought about it, what is explicitly
festive about treacle on its own? Then there was Boggart Hole Clough
Brewery’s Winter Sunset (-0.5/5 - it must have been really
bad) and Caledonian Brewing Company’s Winterbrau (also
0.5/5).

So
while everyone else was left to contend with a very wet December and
quite possibly flooding, I headed to the Great White North and
got stuck into the Canadian (and sometimes American) brews. Now, I
can’t remember much detail, but here’s what I found:

Granville
Island’s Lions Winter Ale – 4/5.

Yukon’s
Longest Night – 3.5/5. A black IPA – not specifically
identified as a winter ale, but when is the longest night? In the
winter. QED.

H.
Egerer’s Winter Weisse – 3.5/5. A Dunkelweizen, but it has
‘winter’ in its name.

Fernie
Brewing Company’s Black Mammoth – 3/5. A bona fide winter
ale, and the first of a few massive bottles that I picked up
at Calgary’s finest liquor store, Willow Park.

I
carded 16 when the deadline came, though Phil claimed it was only 14.
This was still one better than his tally, and that being the case, I
couldn’t be bothered to check. It was only when I came to write
this article that I realised it was actually 17. So I win another
beer challenge. Some competitors didn’t even try this time. I
hadn’t been monitoring them while I was away, so I hadn’t any
idea how they’d been doing. Given the overall sorry state of
affairs though, I think I’ll have to invite other people next time.
Friend me on Untappd (I’m neilcake), and I’ll figure something
out.

Definitions

What happens when you zone out after having had a cheeky lunchtime pint.

Alcothusiast:

Not an alcoholic, someone who appreciates booze.

Anxiety, The:

The uneasy feeling that accompanies any noteworthy hangover.

Booze Buffet Mentality:

The propensity people have to go nuts whenever there's a free bar.

Booze Porn:Photos of alcohol.

Bread Chest:Not booze related, but this term describes the indigestion you get from eating too many bread products too quickly. Just putting it out there...

Crawler's Block:The inability to decide where to go next during a pub crawl - often resulting in crawl stagnation and someone saying, "shall we just have another one here?"

Crawl Stagnation:The result of failing to plan a pub crawl sufficiently - lack of a route, theme or over-familiarity with nearby pubs can all be contributing factors.

Excess Induced Alcohol Aversion:An intolerance for a drink caused (usually) by one occasion of overindulgence.

The Family:My whisky collection.

MOMA:

Moment of Maximum Appreciation. Every bottle has one. It's the time you drink it where you enjoy it most.

Old Man Pub:Traditional British pub, renowned for being quiet, cosy and frequented by old men. Much favoured by people who like a nice chat while they drink.Psychological Drinks Cabinet:Collective term relating to the kinds of alcoholic drinks a person has need for.Road Beers:

Cans of beer that you take with you when you go out, to consume on the way.

The 3 Types of Rum:White, gold and dark. Together they form the base of many a great cocktail.

About Me

Neil Cake is interested in all types of booze, but is by no means an authority or expert. Most of the time he's just trying to be funny, but he is learning, and enjoys sharing his adventures and what he learns on the Drink it How You Like it blog.
Thengyuverrymuuuuuch.