"He would even drift off with thoughts of hunting while playing first base."

Maybe LaRoche can help Mike Rizzo hunt down and bag one of those elusive top of the rotation pitchers he's been chasing all Winter?

Last man standing! And now, thankfully, let us safely put to bed all the talk about how a platoon at first base wouldn't be so bad for the Nats in 2011. Let's just leave all the glaring question marks to the starting rotation, okay? At least now pending a physical, there's no question about what the Nats will get out of first base the next two seasons: a good if not average bat, a good if not average glove. Vanilla. And that's good news.

If you liked how Manny Acta expressed emotion during his 2 year stint with the Nationals...well, you'll LOVE Adam LaRoche. And now, get to know Adam LaRoche (quotes courtesy of BuckCommander.com)!

Biggest buck ever? "230 inches (gun) and 170" (bow)"

Dream buck? "Any buck over five years old."

When Hollywood makes a a movie about Adam LaRoche, who plays Adam LaRoche? "Matthew McConaughey"

On May 14, 2006, LaRoche's life was altered by a routine grounder up the first-base line.

The ball crawled off the bat of Washington's Nick Johnson, LaRoche scooped it up, and it should have brought the final out of the fifth inning and kept the Braves within one run. LaRoche thought to tag Johnson, then decided instead to turn and step on the bag. But he did so inexplicably casually, and Johnson -- going full bore out of the box -- beat him by a hair.

As the cruel baseball gods would have it, the Nationals would score four runs that inning and win, all while the Turner Field crowd booed LaRoche incessantly, prompting LaRoche to turn to an umpire and say, "I feel naked out here." ...

He often needed to be awakened from naps shortly before games.

Or to get nudged in the dugout when he should have been in the on-deck circle.

Or to glance up at the scoreboard for the count.

He would even drift off with thoughts of hunting while playing first base.

"I just learned to play with it for so long," LaRoche said. "I'd be out there and forget things ... and I'd just get used to it."

It was not new. Through his years in the minors, LaRoche's love of the game and work ethic often were questioned by managers, coaches, even teammates. Some, as LaRoche recalled, used to tell him "at least fake some excitement." (via Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, 4/1/2007)

And please don't misunderstand, Nationals Enquirer staff are happy with the Adam LaRoche signing (better than Lee, or Pena!), but now we're gonna go fake some excitement!