Comedy from crime

Monday

Jul 1, 2013 at 6:00 AMJul 1, 2013 at 3:59 PM

Is there a “remote” chance this guy isn’t guilty?

It’s not often we chuckle over crime stories, but in Salem the other day, a man was arrested after police received a tip he might have stolen a neighbor’s television set. During the police’s visit to Miguel Suarez’s sixth-floor apartment, Mr. Suarez ran into his bedroom for a moment. The Associated Press doesn’t report whether a “thump” was heard, but police found the television outside, after it was apparently thrown from the bedroom window.

How did police receive the tip? It seems Mr. Suarez had barged into the apartment of the owner of the stolen television in search of the remote control. When the neighbor told him the thieves had taken it along with the TV, Mr. Suarez allegedly replied, “No, they didn’t.”

We do understand that, for some, a television is almost useless without the remote. Who has time to get up and change the channel? And we hope the suspect, if he did this — Mr. Suarez pleaded not guilty to receiving stolen property and malicious destruction of property — learns his lesson. Larceny, and laziness, just don’t pay.

We also wonder: Who needs to watch made-up dramas from the couch, when real life is so entertaining?