Moving to a new place in Vancouver and need to have the place clean and tidy. Looking for fantasy / exotic maid service.

Prefer a student or someone who would like to make some money on the side, compensation based on availability and what we negotiate in terms of the exotic element. [C'mon ladies, don't hold back - get ALL your tongue on that nasty toilet. You know you love it.]

I am a private and discreet employer, not a company. [so, no Christmas turkey?] Photos appreciated. Interested in fit ladies only. Thanks.

[Right, because you're for sure a hot guy with a dream body who just happens to like hot babes scrubbing his nasty grout with a toothbrush. What a douchebag.]

Location: downtown

Compensation: $60 to $150 per hour [this range seems low]

Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster. [no recruiters? how the hell are you going to get qualified, screened applicants?]

Please, no phone calls about this job! [just stop by in your panties]

Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests. [because THAT would be inappropriate]