“Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.”

~Groucho Marx

My morning started as it has for the past two weeks or so. I had decided to put a kick-start to my day, and since I am often awake very early, or late depending on how you look at it, decided a meditation either on getting up, or before I get a few hours snooze time would really put a zing in my day. It has been working out really well. I have more energy, new ideas are flowing and seeing and being a part of that beautiful calm of pre dawn and dawn has had a magical quality for me. I have been more grateful for the small things in life and that has made some of the gnarlier issues a little easier to deal with.

This morning, after all the horrors of bushfires throughout Australia, and that’s not taking into account the multitude of other issues we are surrounded by, I wanted to spend time sending love and healing to everyone directly affected by these fires, the people and animals, the land devastated by fire and the tireless rural fire brigades which save countless lives whilst standing in the front line against those same fires.

It is a daunting thought, that we are all, in one way or another, able to be affected by natural disaster. The sheer enormity of the love and healing the land and people need at those times is hard to comprehend. At times I struggled to remain detached from some of the scenes of the tragedies I could not avoid over the past week, knowing it was possible for it to be repeated again and again before this fire season is “officially” over.

My rainforest songbirds usually blend into my meditation with their musical song. This morning, for the first time, they found their way to the corner where I sit meditating. I was brought back to myself earlier than usual. That’s ok, their song is always refreshing and was a nice finish to my meditation. I decided it was time for a few hours of sleep and curled up next to the warm body of my husband and fell asleep.

All was well, apart from an unusual dream which I will share another time, until I woke up. The crushing pan from a migraine was assaulting me. So, I have spent the day cloistered in semi darkness and quiet whilst this monster migraine takes itself away. Hence, the blog I had prepared has been postponed for this shorter one.

image from diamondheadache.com

For all the myriad problems we, as Australians, have to deal with due to our vast continent, its variable and unpredictable weather, the insurance companies whose only concern is their profit margin, and those NGO’s whose only existence appears to be to make it impossible to make saving life and limb, home and hearth, wildlife and domestic animals, more difficult to achieve, I hope and pray that the good vibes from everyone meditating, from sending their gratitude for our wonderful world back to it, has the effect I, and others, are praying for.

Early morning from my balcony

“Through my love for you, I want to express my love for the whole cosmos, the whole of humanity, and all beings. By living with you, I want to learn to love everyone and all species. If I succeed in loving you, I will be able to love everyone and all species on Earth… This is the real message of love.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, Teachings on Love

“Duty is heavier than a mountain, death lighter than a feather”. Robert Jordan in The Wheel of Time Series.

“Pride comes before a fall.” (British & Australian) something that you say which means if you are too confident about yourself, something bad will happen to show you that you are not as good as you think you are.

For me it has always been an old saying and one which holds a great truth. It’s also true that it is a foolish person who tries to hide that they have been an absolute ass. Yet we still try. I still try!

An apology costs little – occasionally a little pride but not too much, and a great deal more to be gained from offering that apology willingly, sacrificing that small amount of pride than allowing an unpleasant situation to continue to fester. I have watched some people go so far out of their way to avoid giving that apology that in doing so they have made an even bigger fool of themselves. Such is what being human is all about.

So, from someone who has spent a lifetime observing human nature, take it from me, if you find yourself in a position where, however inadvertently you have caused some offense, swallow your pride and apologise before it becomes big enough to choke you! It clears the air much faster and causes much less grief.

I have a “bad back”, which is an understatement. What it does mean is that I have a lot of pain, a lot of the time. It can’t really be seen so no one else really knows, except those closest to me, such as my husband. Many inconsequential acts which are taken for granted cause me varying degrees of difficulty depending on how bad my back is. There are days when a simple shower is a huge challenge; getting dressed a nightmare, especially pulling anything over my head; and putting on a pair of shoes, even slip on shoes – well, enough said. Simple things you wouldn’t give a second thought to.

image courtesy of michaelsmindandsoul

Even more than this is the truly awful feeling of not being able to sleep well. It ranges from the simple act of trying to find a position which causes you the least amount of discomfort (not no pain!), to sleeping so shallowly each night that each movement you make drags you painfully awake. Instead of being able to look forward to sleep at the end of the day I almost dread it.

Stress causes havoc as we all know, and of late it has decided to see how much it can load me with before I break. Layer upon layer it has been growing until I want to scream in pain, yet I won’t because that would hurt too much. A nice irony, hmm. So I foolishly try to remain still and silent so that my husband can sleep and not worry quite as much as he does.

More lunacy! Weeks of this rough sleeping and I’m exhausted. I look like a prize-fighter after ten rounds with Mike Tyson, black circles so deep under my eyes no amount of make up can hide them, and my face so grey I’m looking ancient. So I’m angry. Angry at myself and my inability to change things. But at present, and I can hardly be anything but present in this, I’m furious that I’ve allowed my situation to hurt the one person it never should – my husband.

He is, without a doubt, the reason I try not to complain. He is the reason I try so hard to do the things I know I should not do because underneath all this, I know that I want, more than anything, to make his load a little lighter and not add to his with my ‘petty’ problems. Yet that is just what I have done. He has done so darned much over the Christmas New Year period to make things easier for me, whilst also keeping up with his work schedule that he too is really over tired and needs a few early nights to catch up. Yet the idea of an early night – horrifies me.

image from fsphealth.co.za

So what did I do tonight? I pouted! I moaned! I begrudged his ability to fall asleep easily and sleep soundly throughout the night whilst I couldn’t even toss and turn. How many married people or couples out there enjoy being able to cuddle up to their partners during the night? Just to wrap your arms around each other and sleep? I know I used to and I miss it! With the pressures of late I have really missed it more than ever. So, for the past four nights I have carefully crept back into bed after dawn and snuggled into his arms and fallen into a deep and dreamless sleep. YES! Bliss! Heaven! At least it has been until he has had to get up and I have woken again. I have paid the penalty for my stupidity in full. My foolish pride has paid a steep price.

In the blink of an eye as he has gotten out of bed, I have woken to Thor’s hammer pounding my head. My neck, shoulders, back and… well whichever side I slept on, has been a mass of molten pain. It has been so bad I have had to ungraciously agree to wear my neck brace because my head and neck felt as though it was going to part company, painfully. I have had to yield and accept help to get to the bathroom and then back to bed, where he has arranged the mountain of pillows for me to try to rest on, and a cup of tea which says “I love you” more easily than anything I know.

image from cutcaster.com

Am I grateful? You cannot imagine how grateful I feel and yet I more than simply grumbled at him because he was tired. He carried my load without complaint or asking for anything in return and I bitterly and selfishly grumbled at his need for an early night. Do I feel ashamed? You bet I do.

Oh yes, I apologised before he fell asleep, but is it enough? He will say it is, but it isn’t for me. Not by a long way. He doesn’t deserve my lack of gratitude even for a moment. He tells me I would do the same for him if the roles were reversed, and he is right, but that is neither here nor there at present. I shouldn’t blame myself either but it is hard not to. I feel like an ingrate. An ungrateful wretch and wonder how I managed to deserve such a wonderful, generous and kind soul whose patience I must sorely test.

I pray for the opportunity to be able to show him how much I truly do care for him, and appreciate all he does for me. I pray he knows how much I love him and wish him the success he has earned with all that he does. I can barely wait until we can do all the things we’ve planned and talked about. I know it will happen because – as he loves to say…..”that’s the way, uh huh, uh huh, I like it”. lol I simply know that it will be and I am grateful for that knowledge from the Universe.

So, for all of the humans out there, who make the human mistakes I make, rest assured, all will be s it is meant to be in the fullness of time.

There is so much talked and written about friendship. It is one of the greatest gifts you can give to someone. It warms your heart, it is a place you can go to when you hurt and someone you can trust to hear your every thought when you are so confused you don’t know what to do. It is one of the rarest treasures to be found. It cannot be bottled or sold, it must be earned, because friendship is based on trust.

It can also shred your heart into pieces, leave you devastated and betrayed and make you want to curl up and forget you woke up that morning.

This is not confined to friends or acquaintances, it can also be family, loved ones. The people you most likely will never expect to ‘turn on you’ in your time of need. Let’s face it, with the stresses and strains of modern life we all need more than a casual shoulder to lean on. We need to know that if we have placed our trust and faith in a friend that they will not find something more interesting to do when you call and need to talk.

Perhaps it’s just me, I’m no longer sure. I may be too difficult to get along with. I may have more thorns than a prickly pear let alone a rose and no one wants to be bothered picking out the prickles any longer. The pathetic and sad fact is that I don’t have a friend I can call or write to any longer.

image from therockatbc.com

I had a friend I wrote to without fail, every year for nearly forty years. We never missed a birthday or Christmas. Since coming to Australia it has been confined to letters, but that’s okay, I’ve always enjoyed writing letters. Two years ago I had the Christmas card and letter I sent returned,”Not known this address”. How odd I thought and checked the internet. Nope, they were still registered at the same place. Two years later they are still registered at the same address and I have no idea what, if anything, has happened to cause the sudden change of heart.

However, she was my last friend. I had slowly over the years, found that one by one they had dropped off. Divorce has a way of culling friends very quickly. Some would say it showed how much of a friend they really were. Perhaps that is so. However, at a time when I needed a friend more than ever before, I found not one of my quite large circle of supposed friends willing to take the time to speak to me or to meet me for coffee, and the last time I dropped around to see someone, I was made to feel so unwelcome (the icicles were forming on the ceiling) that I haven’t tried again. No I haven’t heard from them either. I didn’t know the heart was able to shrivel that way, but it certainly feels like it. One hurt wasn’t enough, it needed company it seems.

image from glogster.com

It’s not the end of the earth, I hear you say. There are many ways to make friends; join groups, start a class to learn something new, say hello to people in your street, join a church group or an interest group. The lists are endless. Most good friendships, in my opinion, are either started whilst at school, during your intense work period when interests bind you first and then develop, childbirth and rearing, or through a crisis of some kind. What happens when they are exhausted, or perhaps worse, you are exhausted from the effort and rejection you have already been through. You close down to save yourself from more hurt.

I don’t have the answers to this one. You see I’m rather tapped out with my previous efforts and failures. Does this mean it’s me who is the ‘square peg in the round hole?” I don’t know. I do know that when I was challenged recently to take five minutes to call, write or be with a friend my heart melted one more time.

I am longing for my dog who passed away, Rusty, …. with him I had a friend who never turned away when I needed a cuddle, a sloppy kiss if I was sad or simply sat with me if I was feeling low. The best friend a girl could ever have. I miss him so much, to this day, especially this day.

So for all those who recognise themselves in this blog, or find the challenge of calling, writing or being with a friend today, beyond your abilities, I will be your friend, because I know what it feels like to have that hollow feeling of emptiness inside.

image from dostoyreflects.blogspot.com

Welcome, one and all.

“No one can be happy without a friend, nor be sure of a friend until he is unhappy”. –Thomas Fuller

image from atelier-ad.blogspot.com It feels like a never-ending search.

“Home is the place that goes where you go, yet it welcomes you upon your return. Like a dog overjoyed at the door. We’ve missed you is what you hear, no matter how long you’ve been gone.” MICHAEL J. ROSEN, Home

Ever since I came to Australia I have heard people talking about “The Great Australian Dream“, the dream of course to own ones own home. As far as dreams go it is totally understandable, though today it is becoming harder than ever to attain. In reality it was probably one of the reasons my parents wanted to come to Australia all those years ago. “Australia, The Land of Opportunity”, the chance to be able to have a home of their own and offer a greater opportunity to their children to have a better life than they felt they could have ‘back in the old country’. Times were changing and the brightness of Australia beckoned to many.

Since nothing ever remains static, dreams change as much as people. The dreams of having your own house back when my parents were young is vastly different to the dreams of today’s generation. The “old” Queenslander, which would have been a wonder in those days has become a huge, four (at least) bedroom mansion. I suppose its all relative really, and who am I to say anyone is right or wrong since I have jumped on the bandwagon yet again. URGH!

As of a few days ago when we decided a move was indicated, we have begun the planning process. Where to, what sort of house, how much land, the services available, which area to move to, and that’s all before the hard work begins. Part of the hard work, for me at least, is trudging through so many houses until you find one which ‘fits’. We have a list we always use. It has been honed over time to cover everything we could want or need in the home we want, right down to power points and if there are enough cupboards and drawers in the kitchen – VERY important if you want to be able to do anything.

image from atelier-ad.blogspot.com They really do breed if you take your eyes away from them for a second!

Packing! A necessary evil – at least to me. Days or weeks of packing boxes, tape, labels, paper cuts from the packing paper, and woe betide you if you forget to correctly label a box! The very first move I ever made, a pure novice, everything seemed to go wrong. I forgot to label everything down to the last detail. OK I forgot to put any labels on the boxes. I had boxes coming out of my ears in some rooms and none in others and not one in the right room! Everything had to be opened to try to find anything at all, and then move it to its real home. As a result it was hours before we could find something to use to for a drink, and let’s not think of a cup of tea or coffee – the kettle went into hiding! I couldn’t recall what had gone into any of the boxes, it was like a lottery – and there was no winner. That is just the beginning. After the unpacking has been done and you have hopefully managed to find ‘homes’ for all your things after they have been carefully washed again, you realise you cannot remember where anything is! I needed tracking devices to locate anything. Now that is an idea – I wonder if anyone knows where I can get some?

That is where I am at this moment, in the process of moving house, of packing boxes, wrapping everything in paper which always cuts my fingers one by one. OH NO! – OH YES! To this day there are still some things we cannot find. Perhaps when we pack this time we might find them? Who knows. Time is running out and I desperately need to find somewhere to move to, somewhere which ticks off the majority of, if not all the boxes on my list. You know, THE LIST, which, if I can get it right will mean I have found my dream home, the one which fulfils all our needs and from which I will not have to move again.

image from oneplanetimages.com There, I knew it existed somewhere.

So, as you can guess, we’d like a place in the country. It has turned out to be a deal breaker, in fact they seem to be as scarce as hens teeth. It must be somewhere that we can work from home, so both phone, internet and hopefully mobile access. Not too far from a post office for mail access. Deciphering real estate jargon makes it even more difficult. For example, this might be what we are looking for and have seen in the ad .

image from boutique-homes.com

When we get there , whilst charming, this is what we find. (OK, literary license has been taken here.)

Really though, the real description might say:

“a home with space, it has ‘x’ number of square metres under roof – which means – they have counted all the covered verandahs, car ports (not garages) and any covered walkways or external entertainment areas. Is it possible to use any of that for a home office? No way, so what it doesn’t say is the house may be enough for a single person but it has loads of covered areas outside or around it.

“it has charm and character” or “a little TLC is needed” – which means – it’s antiquated and may be held up by a few rusty nails. (see above).

“close to all amenities” – which means – it’s really on a major road and the constant noise would drive you insane, and deaf!

“the bedrooms are ‘spacious’ or ‘generous’ in size – which means – you might be able to fit a small bed in but forget anything close to a double bed unless you want a hernia.

“it has air conditioning” – which means – one room has a miniscule and ancient mover of air and the windows open in the rest of the house.

“it has 2+ car spaces under lock” – which means – there is lock on the front gate of the property and a rickety roof over the cars, if you are lucky.

“country living at it’s best” – which means – possibly no garbage collection no phone coverage and unlikely to have internet access.

The list can go on and yes, I have chosen extreme examples just for fun, although some of them are not too far wide of the mark. I don’t need a mansion, although it might be nice, yet I don’t want to spend forever cleaning it. I really, really would love a place in the country but I have to be able to work from there, so it has to have all the accessories I mentioned. A creek would be nice, but not so that I will be flooded out if there is a minor shower. I’d prefer not to share my home with poisonous snakes, but I guess I’m a chicken, then again maybe not, I’d certainly be dinner for them!

So what is it that I want which I find so hard to find?What is on my “Bucket List?”

A place with room to breathe, fresh air and somewhere to walk on my property. Something of a reasonable size I can work from home comfortably in with phone and internet access. Peace and tranquility – oh yes – it would be marvellous to wake up and go to sleep to the sounds of the bush each day.

There is a place out there for me, which meets all the dot points more or less. I know it, I simply need to find it and soon, before the lease expires or I go insane. I really hate moving. After this I will only move one more time – to the house I build on acreage which will then have everything I want in it or on it. It’s all there on my dream board which I look at every morning when I wake up and each night before I go to sleep, so as you can tell, it has been a goal for a while. I want to stay in one place, my idyllic place and put down roots.

My home is my castle, my refuge and my sanctuary. I will be so grateful on the day I find it or build it. I will be eternally grateful to the Universe when this dream comes true. I’m following my instinct here and know I’m mindful that everything has to happen at the right time. I will have my dream home with room to breath fresh air, walk in the country, hear the birdsong, perhaps a burbling brook somewhere, where peace and tranquility will soothe my heart and soul and my health will recover and there is time and space for my soul to grow.

So, if you know just the place for me, just let me know, I would be so very grateful.

image from sothebysrealty.com Yes, it really does exist somewhere.

“Do you know how hard it is to make a home?… That’s something that a woman does from inside herself. You do it in the face of all sorts of opposition. Husbands are very appreciative when it works out well. But they’re not that anxious to help. It’s understandable. They don’t know how.”

The mind is a strange and wonderful thing, it can fill you with delight and excitement and it can also eclipse you in shadows and tears. It’s the quintessential offering between dark and light, depending on how you approach things. Memories are the living reminders of the past, where friendly apparitions walk through our minds and hearts, helping us to recall the fun, the frivolity, the serious and the sad events of our life. Our highest of highs and lowest of lows.

Yesterday, January 2nd was my time to take a ramble through the laneways of my mind, my memories, as I recalled what that day means for me and where my rambling took me. On January 2nd 1998, at 12.15am, my father William Lister passed away as I sat by his hospital bedside. His two year battle with his illness was finally over and as I held his hand, (I have to admit) I was relieved that his pain was finally over. He had crossed over to join the rest of our family who were in spirit and the next stage of his existence had begun.

It was a cruel irony that the last two years of his life were spent in a mammoth struggle to “soldier on”, typical for a man who spent his National Service in Egypt and Switzerland, in an attempt to save his family from as much distress as possible. Such is the nature of the man, and the atypical “stiff upper lip” and non complaining attitude of the Yorkshire man he was, that no-one ever heard him complain.

William Lister (Dad) 1954, shortly before his deployment to Egypt.

In life he was an irreverent rogue, filled with fun and frivolity, an irrepressible funster with an ever-present smile or cheeky grin, whom everyone loved as everyone I can recall fell under his spell. He was a genuine gentleman and everyone respected that. He was definitely someone who was in touch with his “inner child” and gloried in playing with him – especially where his children were concerned, and when they came along, his grandchildren. Everyone knew his greatest passion in his life was his wife, Patricia, (Mum), and with very little difference was the joy he had in and with his children, and later his grandchildren, he surrounded us with unconditional love. His “inner child” had plenty of opportunity to come out and play. Children simply loved him. His family was the centre of his universe and he was a truly contented man. He told me during our long wait that he had wanted for nothing more from life than he had been given.

So yesterday was spent acknowledging the sadness of loss but tempered with the knowledge of the love, the fun and games, the satisfaction he had in and for his life and the great joy he brought to so many, both in the family and to his friends outside the family. The great happiness and joy he brought to my life. At the “end of the day” we can all only ask for this much and if we have achieved it then we have served the Universe and Spirit well.

Patricia Lister (Mum) 1995

We, those left behind, always wish for more, especially more time. Yet love knows no boundaries of the flesh. As I write this I know he is here with me now. I sense his presence, I smell his scent and I know he is here as he was with me yesterday. It is a comfort and support, and what more can I ultimately ask for? His presence prompts me to remember all the good times and although it takes a long time, and there are occasions when I slip, I grieve a little and then remember the fun and happiness and go on again. Whilst the memories may be bittersweet, they are still sweet, never gone, never forgotten and ready to reach out and comfort if we need it.

In my meditation last night I blessed and gave thanks for the wonders of the silken chains of love, of family, of friends which we forge. During life and beyond they remain, ready still to love, to comfort and to teach. I am grateful for the wonderful times I had and which I can remember always.

I am grateful for the lessons I have learned, that the spirits of our loved ones still remain, that we are all spirits in a physical incarnation. There is a sense of peace in knowing this and in feeling this, so that even on my walk down “Memory Lane” I am mindful of the knowledge that he is with me still, acceptance of our souls growth through life and beyond, and that we have each chosen our life lessons even if we often have a difficult time understanding them.

William Lister (Dad) 1995

In the heat of the cemetery yesterday standing with my husband Ray at my side, a breeze blowing zephyr like through the trees, the birdsong from the nearby bush a chorus in the background to soothe us, a young hare suddenly darted out of the gardens, charging up the edge of the grass verge before bounding across the road and into the bush on the other side. To say it was a pleasant surprise would be an understatement. It most certainly lightened the sadness.

This post began yesterday, January 1st, the first day of a new year. For some of you it will still be January 1 in other parts of the world, but down here in Australia, where we are ahead of almost everyone else, it is now January 2nd.

For many people it is still ‘traditional’ to make a New Year’s Resolution‘. Once it was talked about for days before and after New Years Day, almost as if we needed to ‘turn over a new leaf’ and this was a way of doing just that. The reality was that, for the most part, these resolutions, if made, lasted barely the first week of the new year. Sometimes people would make a strong start but eventually it would fade away under the pressures of everyday life, or it was simply too difficult to keep it going. The new leaf simply withered slowly away like the autumn leaves withering on the trees before falling off. Another cycle ended.

image from frugalityuk.blogspot.com

So this is my look at 2013, through new eyes.

I started blogging several months ago, more as an outlet for someone who was unable to get out very much and I realised that I was really enjoying putting my thoughts down. I did make one fatal mistake when I started though. As grateful as I was for the people who read and ‘liked’ my posts, I forgot to remain mindful of the fact that these wonderful people deserved to hear my heartfelt gratitude. I forgot to thank them. Such a simple thing to do, to say thank you, to be grateful that someone had taken the time to read my blog and to say they ‘liked’ it. This is a lesson I will take into 2013 with me – looking with new eyes at my actions.

image from family.wikinut.com

So, I’m not making a resolution, in fact I haven’t done so for many years. Instead I’m looking with new eyes at how I would like 2013 to be. What I’m looking at is how I can make 2013 better, not only for myself but for everyone I interact with, either through my blog or in person.

One of my goals is to try to get something out on my blog every other day. I want to share what my insights are, my hopes, my dreams, my aspirations for 2013 and beyond. I want to let those of you who have chosen to like and follow my blog share in my victories, commiserate (I hope) when things don’t go according to my hopes and plans and in the process we can all learn more about living a better life together. We will all be learning to look at life through different eyes.

image from weheartit.com

That’s my plan, not a resolution. One of the goals on my dream board.

Please join me and invite others to join us in supporting each other as we expand our vision for each day, week, month and our futures throughout 2013 and beyond.

They “year” began with New Years Eve at Ray’s parents in Moruya. A beautiful day and night set the tone for the year to come. It was a wonderful few days, seeing the sights – a finding a great little crystal shop. Needless to say I came home with bags of crystals. (We drove or it wouldn’t have been possible).

A Tawny Frogmouth let himself be known early on and has been a visitor ever since. We have at least four different owls living in the area, from a Powerful Owl, the Frogmouth and what looks like a Barn Owl, plus a very reclusive one we hear often but haven’t managed to get a good photo of yet.

Owls being my favourite birds, it was a real blessing seeing one so soon after we moved into our new home.

Presented to the guests, husband and wife

May was a brilliant month, and after months of preparation our wedding went off superbly. Here we are presented for the first time as Mr and Mrs Jamieson, can you tell how happy we were – and are. I’ve restrained myself to one photo, it’s hard to know which ones to use and there are so many!

Couldn’t pass the day up without showing off how fabulous my son and daughter looked on the day either.

One of my favourite gifts came from my husband shortly before we were to go away, a Nikon 150 camera. It is fantastic and even an amateur like me can get some marvellous shots. Most of all it made it super easy to have something to remember all the marvellous things which happened throughout the year. A few lessons and I might make a reasonable photographer!

The Little Blowhole at Kiama, dodging salt spray to get a good picture.

We had been so busy during the year that we hadn’t had a break – even after the wedding, so we spent a glorious week at Kiama, exploring the area and having a well-earned rest. The Blowholes were in fine form and we saw lots of whales passing by. Here’s the best picture we managed to get of the whales passing.

Occasionally I wished for a super zoom on my camera so I could get more photos – they really are beautiful creatures.

Humpback passing Kiama whilst we were there.

I found Nicole’s blog and became motivated to get back on track with my spiritual growth. It has been a wonderful year of rediscovery and discovery of new exciting things.

Thanks to Nicole we had a fantastic ceremony provided for the Blue Moon in August. This was taken just after the “Releasing Ceremony” and the crystals were in the bowls of water. The next night we had a “Becoming Ceremony” which finalised the entire ritual. It was an awesome feeling and really made us feel great. My blogging journey began shortly after this. Reading and writing have always been passions, now they are intertwined beautifully.

With lots of work in between we went back to Moruya to celebrate my father in law’s 80th birthday bash in October. It was a beautiful day and night – in fact they outdid the younger guests. It seems stamina comes with age! The cake was superb, it was only spoiled by the fact we couldn’t bring any home with us!

On the way home we stopped at Coffs Harbour for the night and the next day were greeted by this beautiful water dragon on the decking near the water feature. He was so tame he let us get really close. Obviously very used to all the visitors, he’s probably quite the model by now! See he even gave us a good pose for the camera.

Back home we were back hard at work but love to take a walk around the garden at the end of the day. Here the neighbours horse came over to say hello and was really friendly. My first ‘kiss’ from a horse – strangely enough it was a special moment for me and I’m blessed Ray got the photo and so filled with gratitude that the horse was so friendly.

I’d love to know the identity of this little fellow but just love his colouring.

We have lots of honey eaters visiting with the flowering trees. Some like this fellow seem totally oblivious to our presence and let us snap away merrily as he feeds. His colouring is ‘electric’!

We were graced by a family of kookaburra who came down several times a day to take a dip in our pool as the weather became hotter. They made lots of noise but it was worth it. Occasionally there would be a line up of all the different birds waiting to take a dip. It was really funny watching them take off one by one and then ruffling their feathers out as they waited their next turn.

We were surprised and pleased to find another water dragon sunning himself at home. When he was in the pool area I “chased” him around the pool – from the upstairs balcony, to get some photos of him. It was so funny seeing me trying to run around to capture a good shot. As soon as I had him in focus he would take off again after some other tidbit he’d spied.

Christmas seemed to arrive so quickly. It was a special time for us – the first one as a married couple (old-fashioned isn’t it?) and getting the decorating done together with the family coming down to celebrate Christmas Day together. We were grateful we could all be together and Ray and I felt blessed that our family could get together when so many couldn’t.

The last full moon of the year, December 2012. Even with the inclement weather we were able to get some beautiful photos of the moon through the trees and the weather remained fine for our ceremony. The meditation from Nicole was a beautiful way to complete a wonderful year.

As always we are mindful that not everyone has been as fortunate as ourselves. Like most people we have had our ups and downs. At times it felt as though the downs were holding mired in one place for far too long, but 2013 will be a wonderful year – for everyone. Throughout 2012 we have tried to remain mindful of what has been happening for us, being present at the important events was easy, how could we not. Being present when things were tough was harder, but we managed and it felt very heart centered in being able to do that. Ill health has been a drag but I’m hoping that with a new move, hopefully to a place with some space around it will give me the right atmosphere to get on top of things. Country life seems to beckon.

For myself, the unconditional love I have been so grateful to find with Ray has made this a wonderful, love filled year. Heart centered and soul centered, we have felt the growing and stretching of our soul growth throughout the good times and the hard times. We have also felt, and been awed by the presence of spirit, our loved ones who are no longer with us – in the flesh at least. It has made each special occasion that little bit more extraordinary and that is something I am incredibly grateful for.