Monday, November 15, 2010

There's No Place Like Home

I'm sure almost everyone has experienced the feeling you have when you are away from home and all you incredibly miss your bed, your shower, your home cooked meals, and every other little thing. I'm sure you all remember the refreshing breath you take as you set your bags on your floor after ending a trip of any amount of time and looking around the house you remember and nothing significant has changed while you were gone. Everything is calm, everything is right, everything feels at peace. Even if you had the best vacation of your life there is always something nice about coming home. There is absolutely no way for me to explain to anyone the feeling you get when you realize you are missing home so incredibly much, when you arrive home and you are so glad to see everyone and everything, and then you realize that you are finding this comfort in a place that you never imagined. A place that you left your home to come to three months before. This place where you didn't know the language, the customs, or the people living there.

It isn't something where you wake up one day and everything is perfect, it is something that happens over time. But for me it was something where I stepped foot in my house and realized that this change that had been happening without me noticing actually occurred. It was everything come together at once. And think I'll soon be switching homes.

Being we are talking about homes. I still don't know who my second family is. I asked my chairman and he said it is a secret. I also asked when I would be changing families and I was told that they still didn't know. My family here talked to him and told him that they'd like to keep me for Christmas and until after I get back from my trip to the northeast (Jan 5-Feb 5) because it doesn't make sense to celebrate Christmas with people I hardly know and it doesn't make sense to move until after I get back because they don't want me getting back from my trip to a family I have only spent a week with. We're just not ready to part yet but it's inevitable and that makes me sad. It helps that I'll be in the same town for the year and I'll see them over and over again, but I also find it weird that I'll have to call another person "mom" and "dad". Now you're thinking, hey you did this when you arrived in Brasil, however for some reason it feels different. When I arrived I didn't have a family here, and now I do and it's going to be so strange having another one. I'm very lucky to have this experience and to have amazing relationships with lots of people but that doesn't mean I'm not nervous nor feel strange.

Like my dad (my real father:]) continues to tell me: home is where the heart is. This has never been more true for me until this exchange experience and never have I had so many homes, so far apart from one another, until now. I can't wait for the day I will be reunited with my family, sleeping in my bed, and eating mother theresa's home cooked meals again, but I am also dreading this day extremely and afraid that it'll come too soon because that means I'll be leaving my home here. My thoughts about this are bittersweet already and I'm not even half way done, I can't imagine how torn I'll be in 9 more months.

I have many stories and realizations to tell you about and being I'm on summer vacation I'll try and post tomorrow or the day after. I had my orientation for rotary this past weekend and I caught the end of RYLA here, plus I have some interesting discussions to tell you about, interesting point of views.