A massive, beautifully landscaped 850-room Spanish mega-resort, the Grand Bahia is great for families or couples, but it's a pretty tame crowd--even with all-night karaoke and access to a nude beach. The huge, slightly dated rooms come with Jacuzzis, the streaming pool is superb, and the restaurants are better than at most all-inclusives.

Stretching out over 20 acres, Jewel offers three pools, the Radiant Spa, beachside trapeze, quality liquor, live reggae, decent food, and even bingo (a must-do for swinging retirees). Families are welcome and there are plenty of kid-friendly activities, as well as various kids' programs suited for a range of ages, from toddlers to teens.

This 56-room boutique hotel may not have the all-inclusive perks of other Jamaica hotels, but its quiet atmosphere and authentic local fare make it a decent option for travelers on a budget. There is a well-kept pool, a business center with free Wi-Fi, a small fitness room, and a solid restaurant serving local cuisine. Its 44 rooms are fairly spacious, but pretty basic, with only flat-screen TVs, empty mini-fridges, and private balconies offering garden or ocean views in the way of amenities. There's not a lot to do in the hotel either, and the beach is a short walk away, so those who want lively atmosphere or nightly entertainment might want to look elsewhere.

Striving for the kind of romance found in low-budget pornography, the all-inclusive Club Ambiance offers polyester bedcovers, the Playboy Channel on a tiny TV, an on-site club with a stripper pole, and tactless "What's 69 in Chinese?" games. Fine for hard-boozing couples (18-and-over) -- but that's about it.