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Oct 19, 2010

On Notice!

Several people have been pissing me off lately and I'm not going to sit around and take it. So I'm channeling my inner Stephen Colbert and declaring a few people ON NOTICE!

[Author's Note: Please read these "notices" in the light-hearted﻿ tone with which they were written]

Nooooooovik!!!

Naomi Novik - You remain the only author (besides Karen Traviss who doesn't do interviews, whatsupwiththat?) who didn't participate in my Keeping An Eye On... series last year. Now I don't expect anyone to feel obligated to do an interview with me but Novik keeps taunting me with promises, going so far as to request questions from me a few months ago. Enough of this will you or won't you drama. This is not a sitcom romance. This is a serious, respectable, in-no-way-professional, amateur blog that likes to talk about books and with authors. Consider yourself on notice.

Obviously, someone stole

the axe owner's copy

Anyone with an ARC of The Heroes - James from Speculative Horizons. Gav from NextRead. Niall from The Speculative Scotsman. Heck, even Joe Abercrombie himself. If you've already read The Heroes (my most anticipated book for early 2011), I've got a heaping helping of hate for you. It tastes like chicken. Angry chicken. The kind that is doesn't qualify for KFC Double Down consideration. The kind that has been pumped up with more steroids than the guy who broke Batman in half and then discovered that his hen was cooping up with The Situation.

Not The Situation

China Mieville - You don't take on Facebook and win. You. Just. Don't. Especially when you also wrote Perdido Street Station and The City & The City. It's not safe to have that much awesome contained in human form. He's like a mortal version of Neil Gaiman. You better Spiderman that kind of influence. And please don't hurt me.

Who is this Sanderson guy?

Myself - I turned down an autographed, advance copy of a 1st edition hardcover of Towers of Midnight. What the hell was I thinking? And I used a Jersey Shore reference. Kill me now.