Wednesday, April 05, 2006

I'll leave the serious analysis of yesterday's election results to the staid and sober websites like Tony's Kansas City. Instead, I focus this morning on the real heroes of democracy - the ones who ran for office and were rewarded with one or no votes. Looking over the election results, my eye cannot help but be drawn to the single digits.

Dalas Foley, for example, ran for Alderman in Northmoor, and got no votes, losing to three write-in votes. What happened? Did Dalas him or herself get into the voting booth, only to be overtaken by self-doubt?

Paul Smith and Susan McRill tied with one vote each for Alderman in Randolph. Are either of them married? Does either have a best friend in the ward? If you live next door to Paul or Susan, you might want to start thinking up some excuses.

Retha Balcom ran for Mayor of Blackburn, but her dreams were dashed 7-0. If she were a football team, her defense would be feeling pretty good about itself. All she needs to do is work on the offense, and next season should be a lot better.

Finally, Bob Vandiver received no votes for Camden Road District. Was he late for voting because of a pothole-induced flat tire?