Dutton Blames Near Loss On Everything But His Track Record Of Human Rights Violations

THE MINISTER FOR IMMIGRATION and Border Protection almost lost his north-west Brisbane seat over the weekend, which he’s since blamed on a number of things that aren’t his human rights track record.

Peter Dutton has reportedly told journalists that union thugs, bikies and the Labor Party were all working to undermine his reelection campaign, but fell just short.

The 45-year-old, who last November attracted criticism from the United Nations over his handling of asylum seekers, faced a 5.8% swing against him in the Electorate of Dickson – a number that was almost high enough to send him back to the Queensland Police.

Mr Dutton spoke to the media this morning in Brisbane.

“The tactics employed by the unions, bikies and the Labor Party in my electorate were very dubious and unsportsmanlike,” said Dutton.

“Any suggestion that my repeated bungles as immigration minister had anything to do with it is absurd,”

“Young people with facial piercings and rough haircuts will tell you its got something to do with the fact that two different people have lit themselves on fire in the detainment centres that I am responsible for,”

“Or they’ll say it has something to do with that horrifying photo of me that came out a few months ago. They are wrong… It’s the Unions fault and that medicare text message.”

Left: Peter Dutton sits behind Scott Morrison for the reading of the budget. Right: That scary photo of dutton