The public sector borrowing figures, released just three hours before George Osborne took to his feet in the House of Commons, underlined why that idea would have been almost as clumsy as the expression dreamt up to describe it.

The absurd description is one of a raft of euphemistic job titles dreamt up by modern managers desperate to attract a higher calibre of candidates, but which give little insight into the position on offer.

He niver knew exactly ha he gate hooam that neet, but he went to bed an 'dreamt' at he wor riding in a hearse to get wed to th 'widder, an' th 'trees on booath sides o'th' road wor hung wi 'garlands o' black pudding.

I actually prefer this use and exercise it in regular conversation. It's just more classical and, well, dreamy, like something out of a Rococo fantasyland. Sounds better too. Dreamed sounds to me like a product of the Industrial Revolution, more concerned with American practicality than poetic worth. It's highly modern, and highly sterile.

Hopefully by now anyone who noticed me defending American practicality on madandcrazychild's list will realize I did so tongue-in-cheek. I love gems like this. I also say Oxford comma, but don't tell anyone. ;-)