17 Images That Will Ruin Your Childhood

#11. The Time Traveler Just Couldn't Stop Laughing

The Child Saw:

Jurassic Park brought dinosaur mania back so hard that it hasn't completely dissipated 17 years later. And of course we know the T-Rex was made of rubber and enhanced with some CGI. We're not here to tell you that it was in fact full of Chinese orphans or anything.

No, we're going to look at what a T-Rex would actually look like if we brought one back using the miracle of genetic cloning.

Hey, it's Hoggle! You know, the cranky dwarf who helps Jennifer Connelly's character in Labyrinth. An important film, since many a young girl learned everything she needed to know about male anatomy thanks to David Bowie's pants, which covered his manhood about as well as the vanishing steam from a hot morning shower.

Anyway. Hoggle. I wonder what ol' Hoggle is up to today ...

Ruined By:

Gah! Kill it! Kill it!

For the love of God, man, do it out of mercy!

That's what 19 years does to a foam and latex animatronic puppet. For reasons unknown, the original Hoggle puppet, instead of winding up in some movie memorabilia museum or auction, somehow got lost in an abandoned piece of unclaimed luggage, where it sat for years.

It was then unwittingly purchased by a company that buys unclaimed luggage from airports in bulk in hopes of finding something valuable. They dug out the now-deteriorated Jim Henson character, called doll collector/restorer Gary Sowatzka and said, "Yeah, uh, we have Hoggle here, and he's a rotted horror."

Sowatzka has restored Hoggle, which is nice, but you can't help but wonder what has become of some of our other childhood icons ...

Ah, but kid actors often go off the rails a little bit when they get older. No need to dwell on that. Besides, I actually find this just as depressing:

#7. The Beastie Respectable Members of the Community

The Child Saw:

If by 1987 you were old enough to listen to music, and had negligent parents, the Beastie Boys were the most rebellious goddamned thing on planet Earth. Just like with Pee-Wee, when you get famous as the Beastie Boys and make your mark on music with a song about how your "mom threw away your best porno mag," it's impossible for people not to mentally picture rebellious kids every time they hear your name.

Any of the current-day Beastie Boys could travel back in time, cast himself as the curmudgeonly old dad and fit right in.

To be clear, it's not that we somehow expect our celebrities to remain ageless. It's just that they look so ... distinguished. If you cast them in a cop movie, they'd be playing the guy on the verge of retirement, urging caution at every stage.