Bob's beginning to hit stride now. The first 'classic' Swipe serial, Kaplinsky Watch was a handy addition to the blogger's armoury: if in doubt, Kaplinsky it became the Swipe rallying cry. August 2005 marks the begiining of The Robert Swipe Show proper. This month saw an astonishing *50* posts as Bob discovers the quickfire, line 'em up and knock 'em out approach that came to exemplify Swipe's golden era. The series was inspired by a comment made by Natasha Kaplinsky that she'd had emails from a viewer who kept a meticulous record of how often the breakfast TV presenter wore skirts, and how often trousers. Bob clearly felt this approach didn't go *anywhere* *near* far enough. Here then, dear, gentle reader, is a compendium of Kaplinsky:

Demeanour: Cat who just got the cream and one almighty apocalypse of a humping.

Smile effort estimate: -77.9 %

Turnbull annoyance factor: Bill who?

Kaplinsky watch is a non-profit organisation. Every time you call 0898 288 666 3777 2666 we will be donating 0.00006 cent to the Katrina Hurricane Relief Fund. Together we can stop this degrading, barbaric and pointless sport (and buy several mops and some sponges).

[Originally posted 19.09.2005]

The series was briefly reprised in November of 2005 with this post.xxx

Now, now Richard - you *know* you'll enjoy it all the more if you're made to wait for it (....or *plead* even...)

;)

Unfortunately Aye, she shares my clodhopping size 12s. (Now you know why Bill Turnbull is made to sit on that *ridiculous* box every morning...) I will consult with the more petite-of-foot Naomi Cleaver and get back to you - if you don't mind a bit of bedpost scuffing, she has a rather splendid collection of elevated footwear...