That’s what Jimi Johnson wants to know. He’s looking for a few good carnies.

“It’s one of those jobs that you either love it or you hate it,” says Johnson, 45, owner of 1st Class Shows. “There’s a lot worse jobs than working in a carnival.”

Though now based in Florida, Johnson is a native of Ontarioville, an unincorporated burg northwest of Chicago. He does a lot of warm-weather business between there and Peoria. To get ready for the season, he’s hiring, per a Sunday classified ad in this paper:

“Traveling carnival help. Looking for honest, hard-working people to work in carnival games.”

I found that curious, as I’d never seen an ad seeking carnival employees. I’m not sure how I’d thought they got hired — maybe born into the ranks. Then I realized that my goofy viewpoint had been inspired by the 1971 Cher song “Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves” — “she was born in the wagon of a travelling show” — which has nothing to do with carnivals, so that connection makes no sense at all.

So I called Johnson. Indeed, he says, many people have wrong impressions of the trade. When new acquaintances hear what he does for a living, they pause, then — with a combination of suspicion and disdain, say, “Oh ... you’re a carnie.”

Often, they’ll add, “You don’t look like a carnie. You have all your teeth.”

“Yes,” Johnson will retort, “and I have a toothbrush, too.”

Johnson’s father ran a carnival, which operated outside Chicago in warm months, then headed Down South after Labor Day. But the family stayed home.

“We have a normal life,” Johnson says. “We had a house. We went to school.”

Still, as a kid he learned the entire operation. By age 15, Johnson had become concessions manager. Five years later, he started 1st Class Shows.

The operation specializes in games. At carnivals, Johnson will team with an outfit that handles rides and another that does food — a typically arrangement in today’s carnival world.

In the winter, Johnson needs 10 employees, but the summer season calls for five more. Plus, a few employees recently made career changes. So, he is taking out help-wanted ads in Illinois papers.

How can applicants impress Johnson? Well, state law requires a criminal background check, which weeds out violent felons. Plus, applicants must have a valid driver’s license.

Page 2 of 3 - “I need people who are responsible,” Johnson says. “And (a valid license) is a good indication of a responsible person.”

Plus, with seven trucks, Johnson needs help driving. So, workers must be willing to travel — and stick with the carnival. Employees are not allowed to drive their own car. It’s too risky to let workers wander off, get distracted and fail to return on time.

“Then you don’t have enough people to work,” he says.

On the road, workers live in small campers, with small beds and showers. “It’s basically like living in a dorm,” he says.

Though Johnson’s fiancee works with 1st Class Shows — she’s third-generation in the trade — most employees are male.

“It’s definitely harder on women,” he says. “You have the issue of men: they probably flirt more. Sometimes, I have to step in and say what’s appropriate or not. But it’s probably like that in any workplace.”

Some employees stick around awhile: one has been with 1st Class for six years. But applicants don’t need experience. In fact, Johnson likes newbies. Many longtime carnies carry poor working habits from job to job.

“They’re used to doing things another way, and it gets to be a power struggle.”

Johnson trains them in 1st Class’ nine core games, including old standbys such as the duck pond, ring toss, goldfish game, cork guns and balloon bust. Depending on difficulty, games run $3 or $6, but players get a prize every time. Johnson says it’s a good deal: a $6 game will win a prize worth at least $1.50. Players can try to win bigger prizes, but there’s no guarantee there.

Workers are paid on commission, so they need to be able to attract players. For that, Johnson says he stresses good grooming.

“You should fix yourself up like you’re going out on a date,” he says. “If you’re clean, you’ll make more.”

And smile.

“They need to be friendly,” Johnson says. “It’s like Disney World. Disney tells them to smile.”

The best workers are eager and observant.

“Make eye contact,” he says. “Look around. If someone is wearing a Cubs jersey, say something like, ‘Hey! This game is so easy even a Cubs player can win!’”

How much can those tactics help a worker? Johnson doesn’t want to talk about the specifics of paychecks. But according to the U.S. Department of Labor, the average “amusement and recreation employee” in Illinois makes about $23,000 a year, or higher than the national yearly average of $19,370.

Page 3 of 3 - If the lifestyle and pay appeal to you, contact Johnson through www.1stclassshows.com, or (813) 318-2909. He will vouch for the carnival life: though the recession has hurt the industry in recent years, Johnson loves to take turns running games, just as he did as a kid.

“It’s a pretty simple life,” he says. “You wake up, get cleaned up and jump behind a game counter.

“I still enjoy it.”

PHIL LUCIANO is a Journal Star columnist. He can be reached at pluciano@pjstar.com, facebook.com/philluciano, 686-3155 or (800) 225- 5757, Ext. 3155. Follow him on Twitter @LucianoPhil.