From Delco to Newtown, Conn: Wrestling with tragedy, Athletes offer up support (With Video)

By PATTI MENGERS

Sunday, March 3, 2013

UPPER DARBY -- Barely 12 hours before he became one of 20 children killed by a lone gunman last year at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn., 6-year-old Jack Pinto was at the school engaging in his latest athletic passion.

The night of Dec. 13, the first-grader was at Sandy Hook elementary with fellow members of the Newtown Youth Wrestling Association competing in a dual meet that ended around 9 p.m. Shortly after 9:30 a.m. the next day, Adam Lanza shot his way into the school, then opened fire with a semiautomatic rifle, killing Jack, 19 other first-graders and six faculty and staff members before killing himself.

"That was our home for matches," said Sara D'Amico whose 5-year-old son, Marco, wrestled with Pinto.

Sunday, the D'Amico boy and 20 other Newtown Youth Wrestling Association members were at Upper Darby High School for the 26th annual Drexel Hill Raiders Winter Classic Wrestling Tournament, and, while Jack Pinto was not among them, he was not forgotten.

During the opening ceremony, tournament Director James Reif presented Newtown Youth Wrestling Association Coach Christopher Bray with a check for $3,500 in memory of Jack Pinto.

"It just reminds you that life is too short. Enjoy your children as much as possible," said Reif who, with his wife, Florence, has three children including 14-year-old Thomas, one of the wrestlers at Sunday's tournament.

The funds had been raised by the 40 teams in the InterCounty Wrestling League of Southeastern Pennsylvania, noted league President Michael Nichter.

"The wrestling community is a larger family. When we heard about Jack Pinto and all the victims of the Sandy Hook tragedy, we wanted to extend our thoughts and solidarity with them," said Nichter.

Also honored at the opening ceremony was Drexel Hill wrestler Cassius Cardillo, who received the second annual Jordan Baumeister Courage award. Baumeister, who began wrestling at age 9 with the Raiders, died in January 2012 at the age of 25 after a four-year battle with cancer.

"He carried on with courage, leadership, honor and sportsmanship," said Baumeister's father, Tom, who presented the award to Cardillo for exhibiting those same qualities in his years with the Drexel Hill Raiders.

The opening ceremony included the national anthem sung with just a few minutes notice by Tish Mejias, and the Color Guard from the Upper Darby Detachment of the Marine Corps League. Upper Darby Mayor Tom Micozzie greeted the crowd.

It was the sixth visit for the Newtown, Conn., team to the Drexel Hill Winter Classic tournament. On Sunday, it attracted 517 wrestlers ranging in age from about 5 to 14 and representing nine states.

"I knew there was going to be a ceremony, but the check, it brought tears to my eyes. It shows how really good people are. It restores your faith," said Sara D'Amico.

Bray, who co-founded the Newtown Youth Wrestling Association with Steve Ford eight years ago, said the check will be used for a scholarship fund in Jack Pinto's name.

"Jack was only with us for six weeks. He had just won his first medal at a tournament a week before the shootings," said Bray, who remembers the grinning Pinto youth proudly showing him the medal.

Mrs. D'Amico said both Marco and Jack had won bronze medals at a tournament in Milford, Conn., the Sunday before the Pinto youth was killed in the Sandy Hook massacre.

Jack was buried with his medal along with gold medals given to his mother by his wrestling teammates, said Robert Accomando, who lives in the village of Sandy Hook. He and his wife, Debora, are parents to three Newtown Youth Wrestling Association members. Their middle son wrestled with Jack. Their oldest son remembers watching Jack wrestle.

"A few days before he was shot, he lost a tooth while wrestling," said the oldest Accomando son. "He brought it to his dad, right in the middle of the mat."

The night before the shootings, they were all together for a wrestling match at Sandy Hook Elementary School where a drive to collect coats for Hurricane Sandy victims was just wrapping up. After the match, Mr. Accomando retrieved the bin of coats from outside the office of Sandy Hook Principal Dawn Hochsprung, who was also killed in the massacre. He later delivered them to his sister in New Jersey.

"I remember taking them out of my car and saying, 'This is from Sandy Hook school before the shooting started,'" said Accomando.

He noted that the fact the Newtown youth wrestling team was able to attend the Drexel Hill Raiders tournament just a little more than two months after the tragedy, was progress toward achieving some sense of normalcy.

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"When you think about what happened, it is still indescribable, still beyond devastating. The families (of the victims) themselves are absolutely broken," said Accomando.

As a member of the Newtown Youth Wrestling Association board, he would like to see the association build its own facility now that the Sandy Hook school is no longer available. He would also like to see a scholarship for team members who reach out to young people like Lanza, who was reportedly reclusive, to help avert future tragedies.

"There's nothing like being part of something, saying, 'Come with me, let's play,'" said Accomando.

Bray noted that the wrestling community from all over the country has reached out to his Newtown team and has been a great comfort. He does not dwell on the Dec. 14 tragedy with the young wrestlers.

"We don't have a lot of conversations about it. We had a lot of funerals. We just want to keep it clear of kids' heads and focus on positive things and not what we don't have," said Bray.

Rebekah and Chris Stites live in the village of Sandy Hook, but, mercifully, their 7-year-old son, Fisher, is a first grader at Middle Gate Elementary School, one of the three other elementary schools in the Newtown, Conn. school district. It is also now where the Newtown youth wrestling home team meets, while the traveling team has met in the neighboring town of Brookfield.

"The community will never be the same. We're never going to heal, we're going to just get by. It's about getting by and supporting each other as a community. It's what we do," said Mrs. Stites.

She noted that any Newtown area child between kindergarten and second grade, has a friend or former classmate who died at Sandy Hook. Parents answer their children's questions about the tragedy as best they can.

"Wrestling has been great, a really great way for my son to get his emotions out," said Mrs. Stites.

Marco D'Amico's father, Chris, said most of the children have an understanding of what happened at Sandy Hook Elementary School on Dec. 14, although the younger ones may not entirely grasp it. He is grateful that they have wrestling as an outlet.

"It lets the kids be kids," said Mr. D'Amico. "The discipline and camaraderie helps the kids deal with it."

Neither of the D'Amicos' two sons attend Sandy Hook Elementary School, but they were friends with another victim of the massacre, 6-year-old Jessica Rekos, who reportedly was known for leaving love notes for her family around the house.

Mrs. D'Amico, who teaches eighth-grade science at Bethel Middle School in Bethel, Conn. noted that her students were among those who made snowflakes to decorate the new building where the surviving Sandy Hook students now attend classes.

"The kids were really supportive of me because they knew I lived in Newtown. They emailed me," said Mrs. D'Amico.

The young Newtown wrestlers honor the memory of their teammate by sporting a large "N" on the back of their dark Navy blue jerseys that bear the initials "JP" and the memorial ribbon for Sandy Hook victims.

Many of them made the 3-hour drive with their parents from Newtown to the Philadelphia area on Saturday so they could visit such attractions as the Franklin Institute and splash around in the hotel swimming pool.

In the bleachers on Sunday, five young Newtown wrestlers huddled around an iPad, laughing as they played the video game, "Eden." When they hit the mats, they gave their all to executing single- and double-leg takedowns. Some were still small enough to tearfully bury their heads in their parents' shoulders when they weren't successful.

While watching the 44-pounders, one father couldn't help but observe how those tiny wrestlers were approximately the same size as the 20 first-graders who lost their lives at Sandy Hook.