Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Happy Tuesday everyone! The weather in Loving, Texas is a miserable 101 degrees today. Bet their not loving the weather right now. That's a nice name for a town. Hey, let's name our town Loving. Because we're loving people in this here town. I wonder if unloving people are kicked out of town. They're probably sent to Unalaska.

Traffic on the 405 is bumper to bumper, so now is a good time to practice being loving to your fellow commuters. This is achieved by waving and blowing kisses to each car you pass in the other lanes. Try it. Then report back to me.

In extremely disturbing news, the L.A. Coroner has just released his report on the death of Brittany Murphy's very creepy husband. It has revealed that since Brittany's death, her mother and her very creepy husband had been SHARING A BED. Presumably the bed Brittany and her husband slept in prior to her death.

DASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! Someone tackle that boy and take a razor to his face. (gently) The only appropriate use of facial hair is to cover up a double chin. That man does not have a double chin. Therefore it is a crime and the beard must go. thankyouandgoodbye

Are you guys as excited about what's coming in November as I am? You know what I'm talking about, right? The next Harry Potter movie, Deathly Hallows Part I!!!! Here's some new movie stills that were just released!

Your very own two-different-nipple-colored dark boobs, Michael Jackson crotch-grabbing baby, butterfly/pelvis, and a disturbing placenta, all made out of yarn!!! Seriously, this is the perfect gift for that person that has everything. I bet they don't have this!

And that's all the time I have for today. Make sure to get your very own placentas before they run out and I'll see you back here tomorrow. Thank you for everyone who gently reminded me that you enjoy reading this daily. I'll do my best to keep it up. Now, something you must know...

5 comments:

I thought the Britt.Murphy story was bad. My stomach even clenched a little. Reading on...

Ooo, nakey vampires. Still not as hot as a naked Kellan Lutz would be or even better, a naked wolf ;-) Scrolls down....

Mmm Jakey G. Nice beard, *Hands him a razor.*

*Happy little Harry Potter dance.* Loved the stills but I'm sad that the Harry/Ginny almost kiss isn't near as intense and the Edward/Bella almost kiss. I'm not sure that can be topped. Still I'm probably going to be one of the people at the midnight showing.

-DEAD STOP-

WTF is that? Is that a murder scene? Isn't that kind of ... racist? I'm not sure about this. Wait, yes I am. That is HIDEOUS!

My eyes are burning from the WTF picture today. Seriously...WTF??? I have so many questions for the person who made that? Mainly "Who are you making that for?" and "Why did they let you out of the asylum when you are clearly not yet ready for release?"

My mornings simply aren't complete without Gingersnaps in the Morning.