50-something empty-nest-search-for-God-and-happiness with more than a dash of humor

Because I’m Worth It

If my wall could talk it would say, “Figure out what will perk you up and then go do that .”

“Okay, after my dusting and de-cluttering the condo, I will go buy some springtime flowers for me.” Nothing like bright flowers inside a feng shui condo on a dark gloomy day.

For me, fresh flowers are always a “perk me up”
or a Kit Kat bar can be. In the last few years, I began buying myself flowers.
I suppose I can have both: flowers and a candy bar.
But, today I thought about my waistline.
I shake my head. Think I will pass on the candy bar.

Are you like me? I used to wait on Valentine’s Day or Mother’s Day for my loved ones to
buy me my favorite flowers or roses.
I always thought the value of the whole act was to have someone else buy them for me because it’s a special day and I’m one special person.
Man, who planted that seed in my brain?

But, after 50, things have changed!

I decided I’m not waiting around.
“I could die today. Really! Why wait?” I say to no one but my constant companion–my wall.

Now, when I want some flowers I go buy some or if I want to see a movie that is an Oscar contender, by golly, I will go see it.
Finally, with my spine straight I can say, “Because I’m worth it.”

I think it takes longer for women to give themselves
permission to do something special.

In past years, I have gone around and around in my head coming up with reasons for why I should or shouldn’t buy this or that. Such a waste of energy.
It robs us of living for today.

Yes, I’m all for saving money for retirement.
That is why I always turn off the bedroom lights if I’m not in the room.
And I shop at Marshalls to save money.

What perks up your spirit? Is it unwrapping a Almond Joy candy bar? Is it buying a little something for yourself? Is it signing up for French lessons?

If you need a perk-me-up-feel-good moment–figure out the very thing that will make you smile. Then, go to that.

Dear God,
Many times I get stuck thinking and waiting
for pretty flowers to come my way or
more blessings to come knocking on my door.
I know this–you hold us accountable for
getting our own two feet moving and only then
we will find, with your guidance, our path to living
the life we were meant to live. Amen.