Same, same same sex marriage debate

As a gay man I have become bored by the Australian government’s talk about same sex marriage. I should be outraged, upset and incited, except every time I hear the serotonin-sucking term ‘plebiscite’ I nod off like a politician in Question Time.

On the weekend the Empire State Building became an exciting, illuminated symbol of equality and diversity in the United States as part of New York’s dynamic Pride celebrations, while in Australia Liberal MP Christopher Pyne reportedly dangled another rainbow carrot in front of gay and lesbian people, hinting that equality is just around the corner.

The dusty moral outrage, hateful, damaging and discriminatory speeches have become as predictable as Sam Newman being controversial on The Footy Show and we remain in a tedious limbo where gay and lesbian Australians are almost as “fair dinkum” as their true blue heterosexual mates, except when it comes to marriage.

While Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull continues to sedate the nation with his commitment to a plebiscite and Tony Abbott ponders why people thought knighting Prince Phillip was not a matter of national importance, other countries have been getting active about Civil Rights.

In May Taiwan’s top courts ruled that discrimination against same sex marriage was unconstitutional, Malta's president Marie-Louise Coleiro Preca says her new government will push for legalisation of gay marriage and France voted in President Emmanuel Macron following his vocal support of marriage equality.

Serbia has elected openly lesbian Ana Brnabic as prime minister and in Ireland, where a same sex marriage marriage referendum passed in 2015, gay prime minister Leo Varadkar has been put in office.

Meanwhile, in Australia our politicians continue to use the marriage debate as a smoke and mirrors distraction from other issues. It’s ironic considering that smoke and mirrors are an area of expertise for gays and lesbians (have you been to Mardi Gras?). Same sex marriage is a serious issue but discussion around it needs to be just as serious, rather than an opportunity to whip newspaper columnists into a predictable imitation of fury.

Along with my feelings of boredom comes feelings of guilt because while our politicians filibuster, gay and lesbian teenagers are continually subjected to messages that place their self-worth at greater risk and contribute to a high risk of suicide.

On Saturday night at the Aurora Ball in Sydney former footballer Casey Conway spoke about his moving encounters with at risk teens and Olympian Ian Thorpe raised the challenges of marriage equality... before excusing himself from the stage for fear of being boring.

Another day, another yawn and another gay and lesbian person passes away without having had the opportunity to celebrate a legally binding union in their country and in front of their friends. In May Australian activist Peter Bonsall-Boon AM died after years of campaigning for the right to marry his partner of 50 years Peter de Waal.

As everyone’s mother says, actions speak louder than words, especially when it comes to love and it’s time to for the Australian government to start a new conversation. With two words “I do” the government can wake us all up, Australian can catch up with other countries when it comes to Civil Rights, gay and lesbian people can marry and we can retire the term’s plebiscite, along with Prince Philip’s knighthoods, once and for all.