Danny Henley: Beware of the what-if’ game

While not really a Christmas movie, because its story is set at that time of year one of my favorite movies to watch in late December is “Family Man,” featuring Nicolas Cage and Téa Leoni.

Cage plays a single, wealthy Wall Street trader living in New York City. All that changes when he is magically afforded a glimpse of the life he would have led had he made different choices as a younger man. While a vastly different life - in the alternate time line Cage is married to his college sweetheart, with two children and a house mortgage - it’s a life he comes to embrace.

“Family Man” somewhat reminds me of another holiday classic - “It’s a Wonderful Life.” In it, George Bailey (Jimmy Stewart) is given a glimpse of what the world would have been like had he never been born.

In both movies, the characters played by Cage and Stewart have an opportunity people in the real world do not - play the “what-if” game with a degree of clarity.

For many people, the end of a year is a time when they look ahead. They make an assortment of resolutions regarding how they will change their life - hopefully for the better - in the 365 days ahead.

“I’ll eat better and exercise more.”

“I’ll become a better husband and father.”

“I’ll spend less time watching TV and more in prayer and reading the Bible.”

As Dec. 31 approaches, there are those who will become reflective about the concluding year.

“What have I accomplished?”

“What did I not get done that I intended to do?”

“How would things have been different had I done ‘this’ rather than ‘that?’”

In essence, the underlying question being asked is: What if... ?

It’s been said that we all make choices every day of our lives. Each choice in turn opens the door to other choices, and for better or worse, our lives are the sum total of our decisions.

While it’s difficult to reflect on all the decisions we make during the course of any given day and how those minor course corrections impact our lives, most of us have no trouble reflecting back and isolating the decisions that have had a major impact on our lives.

For many, their biggest decision has to do with the career path their life has taken. Others will say their most significant choice was in regard to whom they married or didn’t marry.

I admit there are times when I endulge in playing the “what-if” game.

“Where would my life be professionally now if I had stayed in radio rather than transitioning over to newspaper almost three decades ago?”

“Who, if anybody, would I be sharing my life with now if as a timid teen-ager I hadn’t thrown caution to the wind one day after school and approached the attractive cheerleader I’d had my eye on for some time and asked her out on a date?”

Professionally, I like to think I might be the voice of the baseball Cardinals right now if I’d stuck with radio. In reality I’m content being the reporter/photographer/videographer I’ve become.

Personally, there’s no “what-if” scenario that I’ve ever conceived of that has me any happier than the path I followed which eventually led me to marry that pretty cheerleader 33 years ago.

If you find yourself playing the “what-if” game as 2008 draws to an end, just remember that imagined “what ifs” rarely factor in the pratfalls that reality has a way of including. Consequently, rather than fret about a dream life you may or many not have had, embrace the one you have been blessed with and make the most of it in 2009.