Cat named after Notorious B.I.G shot multiple times, but survives

I’ve got some crazy news for ya from Canada today, and it’s all about missing cats, air rifles and rappers - exactly the type of stuff you want to hear about, right? Today I bring you the story of Biggie, a cute little bizzer from British Columbia, who unfortunately went missing on November 3rd, to the obvious panic of his owners.

Luckily he’s since turned up, only it wasn’t all plain-sailing for the poor thing, as he’d entirely lived up to his name by getting shot numerous times. His owner, Nicole Crandell, thought he might have been kidnapped by a fox or something, but when she got a call from the local vet two weeks later she learned the unfortunate truth: he’d been shot by a pellet gun.

Crandell said:

“Excuse me, what? Pellets? What do you mean?’ And then they said, ‘Yeah, he’s been shot multiple times.’

The vet told Crandell that Biggie was found over 15km away, before being swiftly transferred to the SPCA and then having the pellets eventually removed. She said:

“He had pellets in his head, in his cheek, his neck, his jaw, his back.

“The vet said the way the pellets were in his head, it’s like a pellet gun was held up to his head and his body … they were doing this on purpose.

“I was so sad that someone would actually do that to our poor little kitty.”

The SPCA (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) is investigating, so hopefully whichever wankers did this will be caught soon. What a bunch of hard men, attacking a cat - well done you.

Thankfully, Biggie himself is making a full recovery as he’s tough as old boots, and according to rumours, is “super-stoked” to be back home.

“He’s a little miracle cat,” Crandell said, clearly proud to own the hardest pussy in existence. Get well soon Biggie, you furry little legend.

(Image: Rex/Erik Jan Leusink)

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Gary Ogden

Shortlist writer and "the least woke person in the office", Gary Ogden, likes horror movies, Cheestrings, tapping his leg under the desk, "having a drink", hiding from responsibility, screaming into the mirror whenever he is alone, and assorted other things. Mainly the screaming thing though.
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