'Guardians Of The Galaxy' Teaser Trailer: Two Beefcakes, A Green Lady, A Raccoon, And A Tree

Well, kids, today is the today—later tonight, on Jimmy Kimmel Live, the full trailer for Guardians of the Galaxy will be released. The film (which, with its cast, is the definition of the overused term “star-studded”: Chris Pratt, Zoe Saldana, Vin Diesel, Bradley Cooper, Benicio Del Toro, Glenn Close, John C. Reilly, and Dave Bautista) is set to be an oddball offshoot of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, featuring as it does a ragtag band of anti-heroes that includes a talking tree and a goddamn gun-toting raccoon.

And of course, it has a “teaser for the trailer,” one of the most odious elements of modern movie marketing—about 15 seconds of scenes shaved from the full trailer and bound together and slapped online to force people like us to talk about it, all in the hopes of generating even more hype for the already-hyped trailer. But hey, did we mention there is a raccoon that shoots things? There is a raccoon that shoots things:

Directed by James Gunn, Guardians of the Galaxy is set for an August 1, 2014 release. We know that’s a long way to go, but hey, did we mention there is a raccoon in it, and that he shoots things with guns? Because that’s going to be worth the price of admission alone.