Page:Speeches And Writings MKGandhi.djvu/787

A friend warned me against exploiting my dictator ship. He little knew that I had never once used it, if only because the legal occasion had not yet arisen for its use. The * dictatorship* accrues to me only when the ordinary Congress machinery is rendered unworkable by the Government.

Far from my consciously or unconsciously exploit- ing my 4 dictatorship 1 , I have begun to wonder if I am not unconsciously allowing myself to be ; exploited*. I confess that I have a dread of it such as I never had before, My only safety lies in my shamelessness. I have warned my friends of the Committee that I am incorrigible. I shall continue to confess blunders each time the people commit them. The only tyrant I accept in this world is the 'still small voice' within. And even though I have to face the prospect of a minority of one, I humbly believe I have the courage to be in such a hopeless minority. That to me is the only truthful position.

But I am a, sadder and I hope a wiser man to-day. I see that our non-violence is skin-deep. We are burn- ing with indignation. The Government is feeding it by its insensate acts. It seems almost as if the Govern- ment wants to see this land covered with murder, arson and rapine, in order to be able once more to claim exclusive ability to put them down,

This non-violence therefore seems to be due merely to our helplessness, It almost appears as if we are nursing in our bosoms the desire to take revenge the first time we get the opportunity.

Can true voluntary non-violence come out of this seeming forced non-violence of the weak ? Is it not a futile experiment 1 am conducting? What if, when the