Pages

Friday, May 4, 2018

Parenting Tip - Be Inconsistently Consistent

I've noticed two main attitudes that develop in families when things get hard. Either they quit doing the hard thing completely and let it drop, or they make adjustments, streamline the "hard thing" for awhile and then get back to doing it again.

I've seen this happen over and over again as I have taught piano lessons. The family begins lessons with enthusiasm and commitment and practicing begins in earnest. Then after a few months, LIFE happens. Soccer games, illness, busyness in school and Church, financial problems--you name it, suddenly it becomes too hard to fit practice time in and lessons drop.

I've experienced this over and over again with family/personal scripture reading, Family Home Evening, and family prayers. You have them consistently but then LIFE happens. It becomes too hard to schedule them in because of late night games or teenagers are at work or your kids have too much homework, or Dad is out of town. And the scripture reading, FHE and prayers drop.

Life is full of HARD things. But it is in doing those hard things, that real growth and benefit is acquired. So I propose:

BE INCONSISTENTLY CONSISTENT!

I've seen it with my piano families. Those who keep on taking lessons and practice when they can, actually do make progress. Example: I teach twins in a family who is very busy raising pigs and goats and showing them at county fairs around the state. When county fair time arrives, they have to miss a lesson here and there and they are so busy with travel, that practice time becomes 10 minutes instead of 30. But they don't quit, they make adjustments and simplify, then get back to normal practice when the fairs are over.

Another example is my son's family. My daughter-in-law has taught piano to some of the children, exchanged giving lessons with another mom and has even quit for awhile. But when I visited them last week, I was amazed to hear my granddaughter and grandson playing popular music that was quite advanced. In fact, my grandson is accompanying his school class at their Spring Concert. By being inconsistently consistent with piano practice, these two grandchildren are enjoying piano and progressing at it.

What about scripture reading, prayers and FHE. Each time we read and pray it becomes a thread we weave into our family's tapestry of spirituality. Some days,weeks,months we may be consistently weaving while at other times, the progress is slower. But as we continue to try to be consistent, our pattern takes form and our tapestry grows in beauty and strength.

Teach your children to do hard things. If you have to make a new chore chart, do it. Give a pep talk, give it. Be a "mean" parent. Be it.

Teach yourself to do hard things. If you have quit exercising and eating healthy, begin again. My daughter has run 13 half marathons and 2 full marathons, but hasn't ran for two months. Will she begin again? Of course. Life happened and she had to take some time off, but she is still a runner and will continue running in the near future.

Hard things are hard. But they can be tackled, achieved, and overcome as we continue working on them. We are not perfect and not expected to become perfect in this life. But we can learn, acquire skills and progress as we step forward, fall back, then step forward again. As we consistently keep trying amidst all our inconsistency, we are doing what we should be doing.

LinkWithin

Subscribe To

About Me

I'm a widow, mother of 7, grandmother of 20 (10 grandsons and 10 granddaughters!) and recently retired school music teacher. I'm a piano teacher, banjo student, and advocate for families. I want to share music with as many families as I can to help them enrich and fortify their homes.