If you don’t love ‘merica or don’t live here, you might not know that right now is the first presidential debate between President Obama and Mitt Romney. I’m watching it on NBC because Fox is the spawn of Satan and everybody hates Fox… anyways I’m not going to rant about politics or how much I hate Fox. While I was watching, I just kept thinking “I really wish I knew when they were lying.” It seems like one of them has to be lying about something, right? Want to be able to spot that dirty rotten liar?

Here’s some things to look for: (May I remind you I have absolutely zero qualifications to offer advice?)

1. Everyone is different
I know this one sucks but it’s true. You will need to get to know someone a little because different people react differently when lying or about to lie. You might think someone is lying when they are actually just nervous, maybe the bright spotlights are really hot, maybe they are dealing with a personal issue, etc.

2. Look for ticks…or tics. or tic-tac-toes
Think of playing poker with someone. A tick is a ‘tell’ which is a sub-conscious reaction that one does consistently when they have a really good hand and they are trying to hide the fact. This could manifest as a lot of things from a facial spasm, hand gesture, clearing your throat, changing your posture, or tapping your foot or hand.

3. Becoming overly defensive
Sometimes people will become too defensive if they are accused of lying or accused of doing something that they then lie about. It’s an unnatural reaction because the liar has rehearsed his shpeal in his head so many times that he can’t perform a natural, surprised reaction. He might get aggressive, respond with accusatory questions (if asked ‘Are you cheating?’ he responds with ‘Why would you ask that? Because you’re cheating?’), raise his voice to talk over you/interrupt you. This aggression is to overpower your standpoint to try to get you to leave it alone.

4. Strange facial movements
This could be ticks except that they aren’t consistent with every single lie. Have you ever counted the number of times someone blinks during a debate? The number might be high for liars. It’s also more noticeable because the liar is trying to force themselves to look normal (like a non-liar) and these automatic body responses are focused on. They might also raise their eyebrows a lot.

5. The creepy old man thing
I don’t really know how to describe this other than many political men have this thing where they have this creepy ‘I wanna kill you and wear your skin’ kind of smile that is plastered on their face when they’re waiting for their turn to speak. The governor of my state is a great example. I guess this isn’t a liar qualifier but I really wanted to include this.//
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6. Timing
There is an unnatural pause between the question asked and the answer given. This goes beyond taking a moment to collect your thoughts for a multi-part of complicated question. This is more for short, direct, one answer questions like “Did you kill so-and-so?” ………………. “Did I kill her? No.” LIES! Also, a naturally occurring emotion might be delayed.
6 1/2. More Timing
Restating a question before answering it gives you enough time to think of your lie.

7. Space
A liar might place an object between them and the interviewer to act as a buffer so not all of the attention is placed on them.

8. Hands on face
A liar might touch their face, cover their mouth, scratch an itch, rub their neck. They do this while delivering a lie.

9. Too much information
A liar might keep on talking and give wayyy too many details that are superfluous in order to avoid pauses. Silence makes them uncomfortable because they’re worrying that you think they’re lying since you aren’t responding.

10. Last but not least…
You went on Cheaters and they filmed that sack of shit cheating on you!
And somehow, they still lie about!