"The universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper." — Eden Phillpotts.

Monday, December 05, 2005

Another Web-based Toy

for you to scratch your head over ...

Okay, you guys, you gotta check out this wacky site. They rate blogs based on stupidass criteria;

Basically, Gematria is searching for different patterns through the text, such as the amount of words beginning with a vowel. If the amount of these matches is divisible by a certain number, such as 7 (which is said to be God's number), there is an incontestable argument that the Spirit of God is ever present in the text. Another important aspect in gematria are the numerical values of letters: A=1, B=2 ... I=9, J=10, K=20 and so on. The Gematriculator uses Finnish alphabet, in which Y is a vowel.

Please enlighten me, dear readers, but what is the problem with vowels?

Also, because this little exam is based on the Finnish alphabet and because I happen to be Finnish by ancestry (but my real-life name is Hebrew, go figure), why can't I get extra credit points to be assigned as I see fit? Certainly, I'd like to score higher in the "evil" category because being an evil female scientist would do wonders for increasing traffic to my humble blog!

And speaking of evilness, I am incredibly disappointed that I only earned a "48% evil" rating, especially after reading more about their rankings criteria. I am tempted to publish a fresh entry with a lot of swear words like, you know .. the seven unmentionables .. and words that begin with .. vowels .. but I don't want to demean my blog in that way, just because I can (I have standards to maintain).

5 Peer Reviews:

Hah! I'm currently more evil than Hedwig! At 52% EVIL Neural Gourmet is over 1/2 evil... but would that be by volume or weight? You know, like when you buy one of those really big bag of potato chips and then you open it and it's half empty but the potato companies are able to get away with it because they sell their chips by weight and not volume. I hate that. :-)

Latina Marie and tng; I guess the evilness scale is affected by potato chips, too, eh? Incidentally, I thought potato chips were sold by grease content .. am I wrong about that?

Lillet That is a fabulous idea! Do you know any Hawai'ian? If so, please send me lots of phrases so I can readjust my evilness scale to a more appropriate range by posting them here. If you don't know any Hawai'ian, I shall instead have to post the Hawai'ian names for their endemic birds, over and over again. This might confuse people, though. I know it will confuse the search engines.

Alon This will surprise you, but I did not change my first name, mainly on the advice of my grad school colleagues. Although they told me they would have happily supported any decision I made regarding my name change.

I will also have to work on the mathematically evil sentences. Maybe a few hiakus will do the trick? Hrm.