I
needed about 4 or 5 plastic fetuses for an art project
I'm doing (maybe one day ill finish it and link it from
here), but I could only find them in 50-bags. One can never
really have TOO MANY plastic fetuses, so I went ahead and
bought them and began giving the extras away to friends
and enemies. Around number 4 or 5, I decided to start documenting
thier fates for your amusement. Because everything I do,
I do for you, my adoring public...you ungrateful sons of
bitches. Enjoy. Check back often for updates.

photo coming soon

1.
Origins

The day I recieve my bundle(s) of joy in the mail, I put a few in my
bookbag and brought them along for company on the walk to a bar show
in New Brunswick. Along the way I picked a red tulip, slipped a fetus
into it, and put it under the windshield wiper of some random car.

photo coming
soon

2.
Bloody mary.

The next was dropped into a mixed drink at the bar...
"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?"
"...fetal alcohol syndrome...tragic really"

Photos 1 & 2 will be "reenactments" because i didnt care
to document all this at first

3.
Wombless

This one was given to a friend...no interesting story behind it, really...it's
just sitting in her room somewhere now.

4.
Fetus, the other white meat.

A friend of mine works in a deli and shrinkwrapped
the fetus I gave him. It even has a custom label that
says "Fetus, Male, 6oz." He
had some fun with it for a few days, slipping it into the deli case
and messing with people, then later traded it for 2 shots,
3 beers, and 6 cigarettes.
None too shabby.

5.
The Right Stuff.

This little guy was the finale for our fireworks show this 4th of July.
It was a perfect, staggered, 3-stage launch from our custom-made 40
oz. launchpad. This little patriot went up about a quarter mile and
returned to earth unscathed, to fly another day. Eat your heart out,
Laika, you mangey Russian spacebitch! This is true grit. This is a
TRUE cosmonaut. He's got the Spirit, that feeling.....that....AMERICA
kinda feeling!

6. & 7.

6 & 7
were painted as Blue Demon, a Luchador (Mexican Pro
Wrestler), and Super Dave Osbourne, respectively. Then
I tied them to "It's a boy!" and "Baby
Shower!" balloons, and gave them to the mercy
of the winds with the following message on a little
card."This
little explorer has been set free to wander the earth
and find himself. If you find him first, please write
to XXXXX@datamancer.net and let me know where he ended
up. Thanks!"

I'll
keep you posted if I actually get any replies

Goodbye, little guy!
(my back is turned to the camera to conceal my quivering lower lip...I'm
really only half-kidding, it was a touching moment..I actually felt for
this small lump of plastic)

8.
Vitruvian Tot

This is one that some girl made for me. It was a Valentine's day present....yeah
we were weird.

9.
MECHAFETUS!

someone
summon Godzuki!

10.
But which came first?

My
friend Jacob made this one. The fetus is inside a hollowed-out
egg and backlit with a candle. Farmers will use this
trick to check on the development of chicks in their
eggs. Great concept, great execution. Thanks Jacob!

Here
is his daring escape. hmm. I wonder... what a human
fetus would look like with an eggtooth?

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