Poll: Do You Love Boobies?

As has been recently pointed out, The Gloss has had a bit of a fixation on boobs lately. And indeed, there’s little to dislike about breasts, when you come right down to it.

But recently, boobs have caused a bit of a stir…as they are wont to do. Last year, two middle school girls wore bracelets intended to raise awareness about breast cancer that were emblazoned with the slogan “i <3 boobies.” They were made to remove them while in school, and a lawsuit ensued. Earlier this week, a judge ruled that the girls were within their rights to wear the accessories.

Of course, those who think that the girls should have been barred from ever mentioning anything as dirty as tits could only come up with this reason, according to the Wall Street Journal:

“It is inconceivable that the court did not recognize that the bracelets were meant to titillate,” Freund told the Inquirer. “There’s no group more distractible than 12- to 14-year-old middle school boys.”

And you know what? That’s probably true. They probably were meant to titillate. And so here we are, back to feminism square one. Girls: show your boobs, but don’t talk about them. Titillate, but only when other people want you to, and not when it will keep the boys from doing more important things. If men can’t keep focused because of their raging hormones, it’s your fault for existing. Oh, and also, you can mention breasts, but ONLY when you’re talking about cancer.

For what it’s worth, I remember boys wearing baseball hats that loudly and proudly said COCKS across the front when I was in middle school — you know, because a bunch of 13-year-olds from Needham, Massachusetts were such big fans of the South Carolina Gamecocks. Just sayin’.