Something Worth Reading.

Hey, at least on the upside while you’re all on tour, you can bang each other.

I got asked if I was in love with One Direction. This was my response:

Oh. One Direction. Man, I only hear about this band through other people who watch mainstream media like TV and radio. I download my TV shows, avoid shitty websites that would promote such shit and never listen to radio because why would I want to listen to something I like 3 out of every 15 songs when I can listen to my own collection of shit and like every song? Anyway, out of curiosity I have punched it into Google, heard they’re a boy band, rolled my eyes and gone, “Seriously? World outside my own, you’re STILL on this? We had a boy band 12 years ago called the Backstreet Boys who had some hits and they’ve gone on to no longer exist. If you want to go back 22 years ago, there were TWO bands - same thing. They were called New Kids on the Block or East 17. Or any of the myriad of shitty boy bands who are ultimately fund raisers for big labels. They are here today. Gone later today. Taken your money, made girls moist until this massive secret that they are all gay like people are surprised and moved on with their life.”

And the funniest part about all of this is when boy bands do a comeback show. And they pay all these girls/women to show up and scream at them like mental problems. I mean, I assume they pay these girls because if they had a brain cell, a shred of humility or any taste in music, they’d realise that the music that this was originally aimed at (12 year girls) have grown up now and would be really really sad if they showed up to one of these things. And the now-12 year olds are probably the daughters of the mothers who used to be into this shit. And those now-12 year olds have no idea who this band is that are apparently coming back nor would they care because trying to flog a dead dog might be fashionable in certain circles but most groups would avoid it like the plague.

Would be even more impressive if he did them well. I can do 100 voices, too. All of them crap. I also do other things poorly. I think I should put them on youtube so I can get 3.75mil Should I put them on youtube? You probably did maybe 10 voices well. Which in itself is impressive but hey, don’t over stretch yourself. Under promise and over deliver. If project management has taught me anything, it’s that.
Everything else was not even average. If you did the voices and asked me who they were, I could only guess them if they were mainstream characters who had catch phrases everyone knows.