a celebration of form and function

Lohan’s Gold Mine

Lindsay Lohan should have opted for jail instead of extended probation for her 2007 DUI (Dumb, Unconscious Idiocy). With her Dad trying to seek a conservatorship, she’d be better off behind bars. Prison bars, Lindz, not drinking establishments.

LiLo tells ‘Us,’ “I’m so hurt that someone who calls himself my father, needs to use the press to communicate with me.”

Whew. I’m still astounded that someone who doesn’t want her father to use the press to communicate with her uses the press to communicate her business with EVERYBODY.

She also lamented, “It’s so sad that he needs to stay in the media spotlight by using my name and making up excessive lies. He should instead try to be a real father.”

Poor Lohans. Somebody needs to get them into Britney Bootcamp with Jamie Spears as their conservator. Now there’s a guy who can turn a dirtbag into a goldmine.