bigWham wrote:Thank you to all participants and organizers in this event! We had extremely high participation levels, to the extent that we had the 3rd highest number of games started on a single day... ever!

And to all those that did not have the time to fully participate in this event, there will be more events, and they will vary in timing and structure... so hopefully there will something for everyone coming up!

The next big event in the CC Calendar will be Easter. Easter being one of my favourite CC maps, you can imagine that I will be neck-deep in that event!

The newest new news (in a bimonthly newsletter one rarely gets to mention anything that someone else hasn't already mentioned, LOL, so I gotta milk it while I can) is that the SoC has just today announced a brand-new program. Check out the details in the New Guide Program Launching Soon -- Volunteers Needed thread.

Speaking of the SoC, we have our own little bit of SoC news. Deputy SoC Chief macbone has joined us, and he is bringing us some interviews with SoC graduates! Check them out in our Freestyle Section below.

Our other sections, as always, are chock-full of features, including IcePack's many statistical updates in the Platoon Report, and a VERY BIG ANNOUNCEMENT from Anamainiacks in the War Games section!

We continue to bring you our new and improved navigation menu:Use these buttons to get around through the various sections.

Sorry for the long delay readers. Real life (and possibly Saint Patrick's Day) conspired to prevent me from publishing on time. This time, macbone starts a new series interviewing SoC graduates. We also have an interview with fishydance to talk about all things fish, bovine, and dance related.

As always, please PM all answers to iAmCaffeine before the next issue of the Dispatch is released.

1. In which issue of the Dispatch was the first round of this particular trivia started?2. What was Qwert's response when asked if he hates the dice?3. Which tournament winner was interviewed in Issue 104 of the Dispatch?4. Provide a link to chapcrap's favourite mafia game so far.5. On July 18th 2013, which two maps had been used the most so far in the CC4 (CC Conqueror's Cup 4)?6. Who writes the regular article Join This? Or Not!?7. Does DoomYoshi prefer dogs or cats?8. How many territories does the work in progress map, Defend America, have?9. What is one thing merch313 has in common with Hitler?10. Which map has Waldo hidden within it?

Vital stats:Signed up for basic training: January 17, 2012Graduated from basic training: September 25, 2013Graduated from team training: June 27, 2013

macbone: What first led you to Conquer Club?

ebt1972: I've played plenty of other games online, the problem is I get sucked in, spend too much time playing them and then have to go cold turkey. I've always been a fan of strategy games so in a moment of weakness I googled risk and found a game where I could play casually without it becoming a pain....

macbone: Why did you first get involved with the Society of the Cooks (SoC) Training Academy?

ebt1972: Probably the same story as many other people, I jumped in with both feet and kept getting my arse kicked by people playing with a weird strategy. Sooner or later even the most stupid of us recognises a change is needed. I hit the forum seeking answers and came across SoC.

mac: Is it true that cooks have more fun?

ebt1972: Only when the officers aren't looking

mac: To you, what does "train a cook today, lose to an officer tomorrow" mean? Do you think it's accurate?

ebt1972: It's certainly true for the escalating spoils game, where you go after that is up to you. For me, I just enjoy playing, on any map. Sometimes it's about the win, sometimes it's just about playing.

mac: How different is SoC Basic Training and SoC Team Training?

ebt1972: Basic training was definitely a glass of Merlot, team was more about Tyskie. Sorry, but the real answer is boring and predictable. Basic was about mastering escalating spoils games, team was about basic communication. One big difference was that in team it's far more student driven.

Want to get into the Mafia scene, but don't know how to play or even what it is? Consult these threads: Mafia Information, Mafia and You, and Rules and Terms of Mafia.Too much work? Too lazy to read through everything? No worries, you can always jump right into a game and ask for other players or the game runner to help guide you.

What is "Mafia"?Mafia, for those of you that don't know, is a game that generally takes place in a town, where the townspeople have to determine who the mafia (or "scum") is and lynch them via a majority vote during the day and the mafia try to kill everyone at night and bluff their way out of getting killed by the town.

Mafia NewsWhitechapel Mafia ended with a very early town victory. Unfortunately, the cult was found out rather early and some inactivity led to some rather fortunate town lynches. Nevertheless, a great, flavor filled game was still entertaining.

Mafia CalloutsCalling all players interested! Some mafia games need some filling:

Sign-ups:No games currently in sign-ups.

Seeking Replacements:Consult the Replacement Thread to see what games are in need of reserves/replacements.

Advanced Roles and Strategy by safariguy5The idea of moderation is the topic this time.

Middle Ground

What is It?Middle Ground refers to taking the middle position between two extremes. This can be used to try and explain alignment or player behavior.

ExampleAlice and Bob are arguing during the day phase. Jack believes they are both townies. John believes they are both mafia players. Jim takes the middle ground and believes one is town and one is mafia.

How to Use this StrategyMiddle Ground is generally not very useful when determining role alignments. One person can't be somewhere between mafia and town. The game is structured as much more black and white normally. However, appealing to middle ground may help third party survivors live through possible crossfire from town and mafia interests.

Q. If I (Pirlo) evolved to a shark, would you be able to sleep with me? (at least biologically) No, because I am an Angelfish, and we don’t sleep around.

Q. A lot of CC don't realize that you have been through some very serious surgery recently.. How is the transformation from a fish to a cow progressing? And are you planning on having further surgery to complete the process? My last surgery brought me very close to completion – I am now a fully functioning mer-cow (aka: mermaid cow). Just have a Botox injection left to remove a few nagging wrinkles.

Q. How many languages are required from Mayo IT support staff to handle the answering machine? Sorry… I am unable to answer that because I’ve passed out (ask ahunda why)

Q. If a man is alone in the woods speaking with himself, and no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong?That question is wrong on so many levels, that I refuse to answer it. (Clearly this question was written by a man)

Q. Looking back on all your years here @ CC, what - if anything - brought you close to leaving, and what made you stay? Actually I have left several times, when the dice Gods annoyed me sufficiently to give up. But I always came come back, because I have an addiction to the people here.

Q. What does a Snakefish do in its free time? Infiltrate CC clans and report back to the NSA.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet the fish, of course. Everyone knows that!

Q. And what was first? Chicken or egg? The fish was clearly first.

Q. What do you like most about CC? That’s an easy one – the players. CC never ceases to supply me with fascinating people from all corners of the world. If I stay around much longer, I will have a long enough list of test subjects to fulfill my contract with my home planet, Aquaria. Then I can go home. (If you are wondering, the scientists on Aquaria are studying deviant alien behavior)

Q. What do you like least about CC?The dice!

Q. What is a spleenfish and where does he/she come from?Spleenfish is a rare breed of fish that is hardly ever seen. They normally live solitary lives in the depths of the ocean, but every 100 years or so, one of them surfaces seeking companionship. If you are fortunate enough to meet one when it surfaces, it will befriend you for life. They are known to be excellent cooks, and make the best cookies on the planet.

Q. Can you provide an example of a fishy dance? Of yourself, preferably.Unfortunately, I cannot, because it would overwhelm you. Private viewings are possible if you can afford them.

Q. How often do guys hit on you 'cause you're a woman on teh interwebz?I don’t know how many for sure, but it’s a lot. Whenever some guy hits on me, I arrange a real life date. Then I send the piranhas to meet him. I don’t know what they do with them. I think sometimes they eat them, other times they send the poor fellow back to my home planet of Aquaria for the scientists to examine.

Q. How long until you decide to leave KoRT? Never!!Seriously, I am in my last clan. If you’d asked me a year ago if I’d ever say that about any clan, I would have said no. But the cows won me over, heart and soul.

Q. How did you become a leader of KoRT so quickly?I am not at liberty to discuss that, but it involved a large quantity of cash.

Q. What dances do you know that are not fishy?All proper dances are fishy. I refuse to recognize the existence of any other dances.

Q. Would you be interested in coming over to swim in my (ChrisPond) pond?Of course - I have seen your pond, and it’s almost perfect. All it lacks are good looking fish!

Q. Will you dance in Chris' Pond?Yes!I would dance there in a boatI would dance there with a goatI will dance there in the rainAnd in the dark. And on a trainAnd in a car. And in a tree.Chris Ponds ponds are so so good you see!

Q. What music does a fishy dance to?Another DUH! Fish music, of course.

Q. Have you even met Ariel, Flounder or Sebastian? Of course, they are my besties

Welcome to another edition of the Platoon Report, where we seek to bring you the latest happenings in the clan world here on Conquer Club!

This edition of the Platoon Report, IcePack brings us three updates on two of the ranking systems he's maintaining, the F400 and F41, where once again we see movement in the top 5 clan rankings. I also take a look at who joined a new clan in the month of February in the latest Shakers and Movers column.

Thanks for checking out the Platoon Report - many more updates next issue.

It also brings me great pleasure to announce that long-time Tournament Reporter, DaveH, will be taking over the office of Tournament Executive from the next issue onwards. Dukasaur says it the best when he writes, "DaveH has truly been an inspiration as a Tournament Reporter. He has earned 9 GC medals to date, writing for 55 Issues of the Dispatch over a period of 28 months. His work ethic is inspirational: even when leaving on vacation, Dave would always write extra articles beforehand so that we would have something to publish from him while he was away. His "Dave's Tips" series ran for 50 issues and is the encyclopaedia of using Excel spreadsheets to score tournaments. He almost single-handedly rescued the third season of the TPA tournament series, and during that time also took over writing about it in the TPA Update. I hope this is the beginning of a long and equally stellar period with Dave at the helm of War Games!"

In the meantime, I shall be taking on other responsibilities within the Dispatch Team for a few months, before retiring in the not-so-distant future.

Building on the list Dukasaur previously posted as he passed the office on to me, here is the succession list:

1. How did you come up with your username? Is there anything interesting you would like to tell us about yourself?

I have had my username for 20 years now and it has two parts..... smegal is meant to be Sméagol , but 99% of people don't now how to spell it and i got sick of trying to explain it to them.... and 69, well what more can i say about it

2. What are your favorite types of tournaments to play in? Favorite map/settings?

As long as it is not a stack and smack map i will play in it, i play nearly any map or settings apart from speed (i think i have the slowest internet speed of any one on CC )

I am lucky to be part of one of the best if not the best Pearl Harbor Trips team along with davsweeney and simmons4 also i lucky to partner with the best Stalingrad player tec805 I just wish he rolled as well as he knows the map

I have completed 6188 games and of them, 2137 have been Tournament Games

4. Do you like/dislike the new auto tournaments? Why? Also with bronze achievement in the Conquer Cup do you still like to join the conquer cup?

A bit of both, when they first came out i said "Cool" and went and joined a heap....... next minute i had over 100 games going and 90% were auto tournaments(was not a happy CCer), they make it easy to join in one and you can get into one that has players around your skill level, i just hope that they don't kill Player run tournaments.

Yes i still play Conquer cups, i missed the last one but i have won myself enough credits to play in the next one for free, like to upgrade that bronze to gold

5. What was the first tournament that you won? Did the scream of joy raise the dead?

Hell yes, I jumped with joy...... i had been trying for a while to win one, it was called Thug Life and it was played over Several different maps and two of them were maps i enjoy playing..... Super-Max and Prohibition Chicago

6. With 30 tournament wins do you still have the desire for more?

Now it is 31, and Yes i still have a desire to win more, just wish i could get medals for them....as we all know chicks dig medals

7. Okay so I have to ask....what is vegemite and does it taste like chicken?

As a child i grew up in New Zealand listening to a catchy advertising jingle so like Australians it has been part of my life since i can remember ...... taste great on Toast with lots of butter

" We're happy little Vegemites As bright as bright can be. We all enjoy our Vegemite For breakfast, lunch, and tea. Our mummies say we're growing stronger Every single week, Because we love our Vegemite We all adore our Vegemite It puts a rose in every cheek."

The Urban Dictionary describe it as........Delicious Australian spread, made from used brewer's yeast. Non-Australians tend to give descriptions of it similar to 'tastes like a mixture of salt and battery acid'. This is because they are wimps, and need to drink more beer, eat more pies, and of course, eat more Vegemite.

8. What do you like most about the tournament scene? the least?

Winning 30 medals!!! and the hours of enjoyment in playing CC with different teams and players

Not getting any more medals for the other ones i have won and people who dead beating them

9. Is there anything that you would like to change in tournaments?

The limit of 30 medals

10. What question did you wish that I had asked you?

Any apart from this one ..... you made me think more about this one than all the others.

You could have asked if i wanted to Thank Anyone?And i would have to say all my clan mates who get sucked in to play as my partner in Tournaments especially simmonns4

11. Anything else you would like to add?

Just like to add a BIG thank you to all the people that have taken time to make a Tournament to add to others enjoyment of CC.

Thanks for taking the time for this interview.....I will let you get back to the Vegemite

TPA 2: Standings The TPA2 spreadsheet has the latest tournament scores included. (Remember to scroll to the right see the TPA2 totals after deducting all of the lowest scores over the Standard and Premier allowances.) We have now reached the spreadsheet limit of 400,000 cells, so I won't be able to list the remaining tournament results on that spreadsheet, just the scores.

TPA Season 3: State of Play

Click image to enlarge.

Three completed tournaments since the last newsletter so there are 33 completed tournaments and 11 yet to finish. Darin44's Random Terminator Tournament has schelanchery winning ahead of Mizzou3181 and donbran.Also Serbia's NFL 2013 Triples has finished with Draq, Genoke and shaneback winning.The third tournament to finish is Gilligan's Super Smash Bros. Quadruples League with Aaarrrrggh, Pyrhhus, SeriouslyANewb and Swifte winning. Although this was a major, with 1,000 points for first place, Swifte is still some way behind the two leaders.Although the spreadsheet has been updated, there will be some adjustments as a few games are yet to complete which will affect the running order in the lower positions.

Tournament leaders: uckuki (7,865); benga (6,544); Swifte (5,665); Aussie02 (4,4745); Gilligan (4,480). These scores have now been corrected to account for the best 8 Premier scores rather than all Premiers played.

TPA 3: StandingsLink to Individual Scores (The Google scoreboard has been updated with the latest results). As some players have now finished more than eight premier tournaments, remember to scroll to the right to see the scores corrected for the best eight.

TPA Season 4: Tournaments in Sign-UpBenga's Primera división 2013/2014 is a quads tournament based on the leading Spanish football teams. Choose a map and settings and play home and away games.

Dukasaur's latest creative idea for a tournament is his maps for 7 game types tournament in which he bases this penultimate Major tournament on maps linked to seven famous events that happened on the date of release of the tournament, February 10th.

And now for our regular look at a selection of the tournaments in sign-ups!

Take the Tour, The World's Hot Spots by poptartpsycho18 - Freemium Friendly!After a long hiatus from organising tournaments (how long has it been - 5 years?), poptartpsycho18 is back with her awesome tournament formats, starting with this one. The tournament involves travelling from one of the world's hot spots to the next, by winning games on CC maps that have the said city somehow incorporated into the map. The games are entirely 1v1 games, and there are a large pool of maps that can be used for each of the set city stops, meaning there different players may plot different routes to the end of the tournament. It'll certainly be a thrilling affair, with a low and non-strenuous game load of only 1 game per round!

007 - James Bond by LittleMao - Premium Only.Gosh, I've included pretty much every single tournament that LittleMao has started so far, but when you look at the stuff he produces, I think my actions are totally justified. He's really quickly making a name for himself with these themed tournaments, and brings us his latest one with a James Bond inspired tournament. As an agent of MI6, you are assigned various missions, with map choices based on some of films and books in the series. Points are awarded based on the agents' performances in the various missions and the mission objectives. Definitely lots of variety in gameplay involved here, so hurry up and sign up! Do it discreetly though - you never know when the enemies are watching...

4 For The Americas by WILLIAMS5232 - Premium Only.It's been a long while since I've highlighted a good, old-fashioned team bracket tournament, so here it is. Starting with a total of 8 Quads teams, 4 teams will start in their side of the bracket playing on the First Nations North America, while the remaining 4 teams will play on the First Nations South America. The final clash between the winner of each half of the bracket will take place as a best of 5 series on First Nations Americas. If you like Quads clashes on large maps like these, grab your partners and sign up for this one!

Welcome everyone. It's great to have you reading this, and enjoying all of the up and coming maps on Conquer Club. This months Official Monthly Challenge is the BetaMarch 2014, which has brought some great attention to the Foundry, and some even better feedback. Not sure what it is? Click here and see how easy it is to win cool stuff, and support the great maps in development. Keep it up everyone, and the maps will only get better.

For this issue we have the second part of Koontz1973's Diary of a map. Rorke's Drift. Part two, continuing the journey down the rabbit hole that is Koontz1973, and as always Maps in Development will show you the status and progress of your favorite maps and map makers.

Drafting RoomPutting an image onto the web for everyone to see can be a nerving experience. Having people comment on it is worse. The success of a new map can come down to the first few comments. If these are positive, it can spur people onto new heights, if they are negative, people withdraw and human nature dictates that we fight. But the attitude of the map maker always helps. Someone who is positive will succeed while anyone who is negative will fail. Ask yourself which one are you? If you are the latter, then do not come to the foundry as negativity causes flame wars that help no one make maps.

natty dread wrote:The first thing that I would advise is to get rid of all the line connections and replace them with territories & borders. Seriously, it's like a mess of lines there, making for a very confusing look, and you need to simplify this a lot - when I say simplify I don't mean the gameplay, but the visual look of the map... you need to make the map easier to read, and eliminating that criss-cross of lines is a good first step towards that.... you have the right idea with using textures on the map, but they will need some work. Especially the canvas effect on the right/upper right of the map - the left side looks like it's trying to imitate grassland terrain, so why would you have a paper/canvas type texture on the right? The cork texture on the legend is pretty nice though. But why is there a bare slab of grey in the middle? It looks bland compared to the rest of the map.Anyway, keep on working, there's good potential here.

This from natty is a good way to say a map looks like shit but keep at it. All of these points were correct, he explained why it needed changing, but not how.

Version 4.When I say that this is version four, it is really version 20 odd. That is how many times this map changed on my computer before posting this. You can clearly see the final map on this image, Shaka has been moved, Kingul has been added to the map (removed when a better name came up).

This layout came about when the first image I posted looked confusing. As it was my map, I understood all of the finer points, what attacked where, what each symbol meant and more importantly, how to win. But what it lacked was understandability. It needed a lot of clarity.

Industrial Helix wrote:Your map needs a legend indicating where the 150 yard line is and where the kings are, ect. These symbols and colors need to translate to something.

Clarity is the ability to play a map without having to read a legend. We all understand the territory lines but what happens when they change from black to red? Like I had. What does it mean? This has to go into the legend in a clear way. What does brown grass do? Does it mean anything different from the green grass? Why do the rocks small and not large? Trees need brown earth beneath them? All of these things need sorting. All comments were correct when made - but for some it was an easy thing to say while others needed to be rude about it. When I say rude, it meant that their comment was thought about and rejected.

Flame WarsNothing annoys me more than when a stupid comment is made by anyone! The problem with making maps for this site is that anyone can comment. From a pre-pubescent, spotty, runny nosed kid with no experience to an experienced map maker with 20 maps under his belt. One thinks he knows best while the other normally does know best. What both have in common is the ability to not understand the word NO. No, for some reason has the ability to rile people to such an extent that we get flame wars. You have all seen and read them, but 2 or 3 pages in a map thread is not a good thing. Try sorting all the good stuff from the bad can be a hard thing. Before I started my map, I had read the rules of map making and one rule is that all changes have to be made unless it can be rebutted by the map maker or someone else from the community. Remember the old adage of too many cooks spoil the broth? I got lucky with only a very minor war between me and Dukasaur. He was right (to a point ) but it does make it harder. Just remember, to play nice kiddies.

Bring on the names.If you look at the above image, only the British soldiers and Zulu chieftains have names. Kingul was a made up name but it was time to find names for all territs. That is 80 names for Zulu warriors. Good thing for the internet. But there is one problem which I had not figured on - all of the lists on the internet where identical and I could only find around 70 names. Some had to be made up for the missing territs. These include koontz (my on line name, fun for me to play), Anya, Tata, Hungarian for mum and grandfather and Jadzia; my daughters middle name taken from Star Trek. Kingul got the boot for Buthelezi. All of the chieftain names have meaning...Cetshwayo - leader during the Zulu war.Dabulamanzi - brother to Cetshwayo and led the Zulus at Rorke's Drift.Mpande - Longest reign over Zulu nation 1798–1872.Ndaba - chieftain of Zulu nation 1745-1763.Phunga - Chieftain of modern day Zulu nation inside South Africa.Shaka - United the northern tribes of the Zulu people and gained control over most of what became South Africa.Chief Mangosuthu Buthelezi - the Zulu chieftain that played Dabulamanzi in the film Zulu.

Because of the 11 British names, and the layout of the map, getting the map playable was going to be a problem. How to get an odd number to fit nicely into an even map.

Little men from Mars.With the legend and map growing with each version, both wanting the limited space given to map makers (large map 840 pixels wide / 800 deep) something needed to give. Also something was needed for clarity. I came up with the little men from Mars. My legend text explaining what territ did what, why and how was unreadable! Always much easier to show it. Meet the Zulu chieftains and the River Warriors.It became clear with this image, I was getting somewhere (with a lot of help form others). After a couple more updates (now version 5.4) I got this.

thenobodies80 wrote:Onward and Upward!

Time to play with the big boys.

MrBenn wrote:At last

Long long way to go. Next time - Impassables, fonts, layout, and Victor Sullivan jumps all over gameplay.

And as Alex Berger said, "Maps are the foundation on which adventure is built." Enjoy.

Submitting Your Own Articles

If you have a story for the Foundry section you think the ConquerClub Community would find interesting, you can send your article thoughts to Seamus76 and you may just see your article published in the Newsletter!

Great interview, Fishy! You're very clever. I laughed at almost every answer. The most clever thing though was insisting on getting the big payoff before agreeing to clan leadership. I wish I had thought of that.

Denise wrote:Great interview, Fishy! You're very clever. I laughed at almost every answer. The most clever thing though was insisting on getting the big payoff before agreeing to clan leadership. I wish I had thought of that.