Just a bit of constructive criticism: try to keep an eye on your tense shifts. Present tense is really difficult to write in, and it's really easy to make mistakes; example, I've noticed past tense starts to slip in sometimes. But hey, I salute you; it's not an easy challenge to take on. Keep writing! :)

I like that plot of this story. Some of the grammar and editing stuff could be fixed, and I felt like it was a bit choppy going from Riley's point of view to Dakota really quickly, but other than that it is a really interesting story so far.