Date: Sun, 8 Jul 2001 17:13:09 -0700 (PDT)
From: Kelly Fedor
Subject: His Life Part 6
His Life Part 6
By- Kelly Jean
I woke up the morning after the dance club to
feel
a warm hand on my naked chest. My heart began beating
like it never had before. I thought for sure I'd be
turning over to see my father or someone ready to
murder me. Rather, it was Jake. His body was curled
against mine and shaking, yet he was sound asleep. All
around his eyes and down his cheeks were tear stains.
His clothes were all on, except for his shoes, so I
knew he wasn't shaking from being cold.
For nearly an hour I watched him sleep, wondering
why he was here and what had happened. I saw my window
was open. That was my only guess how he got in since
the main doors were locked.
Outside my room I began to hear rustling. I
decided to leave my room so neither of my parents
would come inside.
I walked out still in my boxers and headed into
the kitchen to grab a glass of orange juice; but not
for me.
"Why the hell are you up this early?" my father's
voice was so loud and distinctive. I was scared it had
woken up Jake. "It's nearly 8:00."
"Just a bad dream. Are you going to church?"
My mom spoke. She was next to me washing a few
glasses, "Yes. Are you coming, Tony?"
"No. I'm going back to bed."
"What's new? You're going to hell," my father
announced. "Pfft, I'm going to hell too. I shouldn't
even bother going to church."
"Why do you say that?" my mom asked. She walked
over and opened the door.
My dad smiled at me before walking out the door,
"Oh. Just things that I've done and things I'll do in
the future. Things no one needs to know about."
The moment they were gone I went back into my
room. Jake was still asleep. He woke up twenty minutes
later. His eyes slowly cracked open. I was sitting
next to him on my bed caressing his hair. He gently
crawled to my lap and laid his head down. Again he
started crying.
"Jake, what happened? What's wrong?"
He climbed up to hold onto me. His soft hair
brushed against my face, "I have really, really bad
news."
"You can tell me..shh...relax...you're with me
now, it's okay."
Jake spoke to me a few minutes later, "When I got
home that night my dad and mom talked to me and said
that they got the doctor report back from maybe, three
weeks ago. I have about a month to live."
"What!? But you seem so healthy! It doesn't even
seem like you have AIDS!"
"I'm not dying from AIDS! I have, God, I have
cancer, too. They discovered it too late. The damn
Docs
can't do anything for me. I've known for a few years.
I
didn't want to tell you."
I held him closer, "Why did you come to my room?"
"Because I love you more then anyone else in this
world. I know it's soon to say that, but I feel that
way. I don't wanna leave you."
Right then I realized I truly did love Jake back.
It wasn't just his body I loved. It was him. My fear
of
my feelings toward him was gone. Now a new fear had
risen.
"I don't wanna leave you," he repeated. I'd never
seen anyone crying so hard in my life. The orange
juice was anything but important. "I feel like shit
right now. I feel like I'm dying. I felt like this
last night, too. I just didn't tell you. I kissed you
rather then complained...sex gets my mind off my
health...and sex is what also made me get sick enough
to die. What am I going to do?"
Suddenly I began crying. I didn't know what to
tell him. I couldn't believe this. The first man I
ever
loved was about to be taken from me. I was praying
that
God would take me instead. I wanted to be gone, not
him. The next three hours was spent in my room holding
each other and sobbing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
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