There we go. 48 hours after moving in I finally get around to mentioning that the house came complete with a cat, a dark grey, antisocial thing named Rabbits. We were warned that he (or she, I can’t remember now) was not really a house cat and would only be seen indoors in inclement weather, and so it proved for most of the time.

I am not sure how wild my parents were about having the expense of a cat added to the family budget, either. For the first few weeks we were there feeding Rabbits became my responsibility, dishing up a couple of scoops of stinking ‘Jellymeat’ twice a day, along with a drink. All of which the cat invariably left to go off anyway.