Developing Volunteers and Those Who Lead Them

Conquering Insecurity

I love hearing actors talk about their craft. It is an impressive thing when someone can project an image, personality or persona that is different than his or her true self. In fact we live in a world that rewards people with a big payday when they can convincingly portray themselves to be a specific character.

Unfortunately most of us struggle with insecurity. Perhaps it is a result of a tabloid and social media hungry culture, or perhaps it is just a reality of human nature. Insecurity has a way of showing up most prominently in our interactions with others.

There are 2 ways we cultivate insecurity in our soul, consider which one is the greater struggle for you:

Overreaching – this is when you act better than you really are; you project yourself to be more competent, experienced, spiritual or intelligent than you really are.

Sandbagging – this is when you act worse than you really are; you project yourself to be less competent, experienced or intelligent than you really are.

Whether you attempt to make yourself look better or worse, energy is wasted to project a persona that is different from our true selves. You cannot help but struggle with insecurity and the concern that you will be found out.

Projecting yourself to be someone your not can feel a bit like a victimless crime. Often we believe that projecting this false self will actually help those around us. This form of acting will actually create a lot of hurt in your world:

It hurts our results – it’s like building a house on a foundation of sand and thinking you are building on concrete. The best results are possible when a team of people invest themselves fully – not holding anything back but being honest about what they can and cannot do.

It hurts our teammates – people want to know the real you. We take 2 hours to disengage from life and watch actors play a role. We spend holidays, celebrations and meaningful time with real people. Eventually people around you can tell when you are hiding and unwilling to show your true self.

It hurts our soul – Attempting to hide who you really are (for better or for worse) creates a battle within – it is a discontent with your identity. How can your soul experience peace when you would rather be someone else?

It rejects the intentional creation of God – When you act like someone you are not it is a way of saying, “God you got this one wrong!” We read in places such as Psalm 139 that God was very intentional when He created us. If God made us with great intentionality, why do we believe we need to make adjustments?