Quick Oxford Glossary

Aegrotat.
Sick note used for missing exams but still passing. Much sought after,
but you usually have to have something horrible to get one.

Aesthete.
Non-sportsman. (cf., hearty.)

The Ashmolean.
The main museum in Oxford, and the oldest in Britain, founded by Elias
Ashmole in 1683.

B.A.
Bachelor of Arts. Letters you can put after your name when you get
a degree at Oxford (in most subjects, including science!). See also
M.A.

Bags.
See `Oxford bags'.

Balls.
Held in the summer at a number of colleges. D.J. or ball gown are
the standard attire, depending on your sex. These used to go on all
night, with breakfast included. Sadly many now finish in the small
hours because of complaints about the noise. Tickets are normally
sold for two, so you have to find a partner; actually you will have
more fun if you go with a crowd of people you know. It can be expensive,
but it is worth going at least once in your life if you get the chance.
See also `Commem. Ball'.

Batells.
College bill. If you are still not sure what this is, you will probably
be receiving one shortly!

Beating the bounds.
A strange ritual of beating the ground with willow sticks to impress
important boundaries upon the peasants. Only done for ``fun'' nowadays.

Blackwell's.
The biggest and best bookshop in Oxford, located in the Broad. People
even come from Cambridge to visit.

Boater.
Hard flat-topped rimmed straw hat worn in the summer, especially by
the river for Eights Week, etc.

The Boat Race.
Annual competition between two eights rowed by students from Oxford
and Cambridge held on the River Thames in London from Putney to Mortlake.
Oxford had a winning streak over many years recently by importing
large so-called students from America. Cambridge complained but to
no avail, but are now back on form anyway, Note that ``boat'' is Cockney
rhyming slang for ``face'' - boat = boat race = face. (Just though
you might be interested.)

The Bod.
Short for `Bodleian Library', the main library at Oxford University.
The easiest way to get a library card is to spend three years lolling
around at Oxford. The difficult way is to apply at the admissions
office.

Blue.
Award for sporting prowess. Half-blues are given for lesser sports
like tiddly-winks(?).

Bump.
The river at Oxford (and Cambridge) is not wide enough for several
eights to row abreast so races are conducted by starting at equidistant
points along the river and trying to `bump' the eight in front. This
involves simply catching up rather than (necessarily) literally bumping
it. See also `over-bump'. In Cambridge you do actually have to bump
them apparently. (See `the appropriate spot to stand', by A. Cambumpswatcher,
of Grassy Corner, Fen Ditton, Cambs.)

Bump supper.
Celebratory dinner if an eight manages a bump (up) on every day of
Eights Week or Torpids. Each member of the crew also gets an oar to
keep as a memento and an (old) eight may be burnt as part of the festivities
(a boat that is!). A highly recommended shindig which often results
in a shindy. (That should send you to your dictionary!)

The Broad.
See the High.

Bulldog.
Choose from:

* University `policeman' in a bowler hat.
* Churchillian canine beast.
* Pub in St. Aldates (see both sides of the pub sign for more information).

Cambridge.
The other place. Oxford view: a cold damp place in the Fens founded
by a group of people thrown out of Oxford. (They tell a rather different
story in Cambridge!) Hence Cambrian meaning ``of or relating to the
first period in the Palaeozic era, marked by the occurrence of many
forms of invertebrate life.'' Perhaps Cambridge is older than Oxford
after all!

A Cambridge man.
The complement of an Oxford man.

Cantab.
Nothing to do with Canterbury, but short for `of Cambridge (University)'
in Latin (Cantabrigiensis).

Carfax.
The centre of the city of Oxford, where the High, St. Aldates, Queen
Street and Cornmarket Street meet. There is a good view from the tower
here.

Chancellor.
The head of the University who isn't here. Currently Lord Jenkins
of SDP (RIP) and `clawet' fame. Normally somebody you have heard of.
(cf., Vice-Chancellor.)

The Cherwell.
(Pronounced ``charwell''.) The other river in Oxford (cf., the Thames,
of which it is a tributary), recommended for punting. Also a student
newspaper for those with less literary pretensions than Isis.

Christ Church.
The biggest college at Oxford. so big that the college `chapel' is
also Oxford Cathedral! Also known as the House. You might like to
avoid Mercury and the Dean.

Class.
You can get a first, second or third class honours degree or a pass
degree. You used to be able to get a `fourth' as well. Supposedly
it was only worth going for a first or a fourth at Oxford, depending
on how you wanted to spend your time. Anything between was wasted
effort.

COD.
Concise Oxford Dictionary from the OUP.

Collections.
Not money-raising for charity, but beginning of term exams for students
to see if they have done any work in the vac.

College.
One of thirty or so institutions which make up the University. Beware
of the imitations on the outskirts of the city which (ab)use the name
of Oxford.

Come up.
To arrive as a student at Oxford. See also `go down' and `sent down'.

Commem. Ball.
An extra-special Ball commemorating something, but most attendees
would be hard pushed to tell you what.

Commoner.
Student who does not have a scholarship or exhibition.

Congregation.
The legislative body consisting of most of the academics in the University
which refused to give Maggie Thatcher her honorary Oxford degree.
It also decides on various other University matters. You must wear
a gown to attend so not many people do - except where an ex-Prime
Minister is concerned.

Convocation.
All Oxford M.A.s. You can elect the Chancellor and Professor of Poetry,
but you must turn up in person.

Daily Information.
Daily (in term time) news sheet which appears on various college and
University notice boards. Worth reading if you find one. It becomes
`Weekly Information' out of term time.

Dame's Delight.
Female equivalent of Parson's Pleasure, sadly defunct for many years.

The Dean.
Head of Christ Church. Other colleges have a variety of different
names for the head of the college to confuse visitors.

Dinner Jacket.
Special dark suit worn with a black bow tie and fancy shirt for formal
dinners and most college balls. Try Shepherd and Woodward (109 High
Street) or Walter's (10 The Turl) if you need to buy or hire one.
This attire is also known as `Black Tie', especially on invitations.

D.Phil.
Doctor of Philosophy. Most Universities call this a Ph.D., but Oxford
has to be different.

Eight.
A rowing boat with eight oarsmen (or women) and a cox to steer.

Eights Week.
Rowing between the colleges in the summer. Like a junior Henley Royal
Regatta. The river is the place to be on the Saturday. Held in 5th
week of Trinity term. Drink Pimms from one of the college boathouses
and dress up in a boater and blazer. Torpids is the other rowing event
earlier in the year.

Encaenia.
Funny ceremony in which important academics dress up in all their
finery and parade from some College (where they have congregated for
pre-show drinks) down the Broad before dolling out honorary degrees
in the Sheldonian. The Chancellor gets the prettiest gown and also
has a page boy to hold it up for him. Often a famous face or two can
be spotted. Note that the show doesn't actually happen till about
half an hour after the announced start time to give them time to down
their sherry, adjust their gear, etc. Worth seeing if you are in Oxford
at the time, although tickets to actually get into the Sheldonian
are hard to come by (and then you would miss the parade anyway). The
ceremony is held in the summer so the gowns are less likely to get
wet! The Vice-Chancellor holds a garden party in one of the colleges
during the afternoon where you can spot gowns in various states of
decomposition, and also judge (or even enter) the silliest hat competition.
(Turquoise and orange with lots of braid and twiddly bits are favourites!)

Exam Schools.
Or Examination Schools. Building where Prelims, Mods and Finals are
held. Also used for lectures and other purposes throughout the rest
of the year.

Exhibition.
Lesser scholarship.

Fellow.
Member of the governing body of a College. Basically, all (or most
of) the college tutors. A fellow can be female in this context, rather
like a Californian `guy'!

Filibuster.
A large hard biscuit, recommended by dentists.

Finals.
Final examinations at the end of 3 or 4 years as an undergraduate
student. Your degree depends (almost) entirely on your exam result.

A first.
See class.

A fourth.
See class. No longer available.

Frank Cooper.
The original maker of `Oxford Marmalade'. There was a tourist shop
for a while selling souvenirs (and marmalade) in the High Street on
the site of the original shop but this is now also defunct. They offered
to send marmalade anywhere in the world and there was a small exhibition
including tins of marmalade taken by Scott to the Antarctic! Was worth
dropping in if you were passing but I am afraid you are too late!

Fresher.
First-year student.

Freshers' Fair.
Stalls for all the University Societies and Clubs held in the Exam
Schools at the beginning of each academic year.

Gargoyle.
See photograph.

Gated.
Confined to college as a punishment. Not used much nowadays.

Gaudy.
A jolly good (normally annual) college dinner for old members.

Go down.
Leave as a student at Oxford (either temporarily or permanently).
See also `come up' and `sent down'.

Gown.
Robe worn by academics to avoid having soup spilt on them at meal-times
in Hall. Thus, the larger the gown, the more prestigious it is; the
more colourful it is, the more meals the owner has been served. Also
used to refer to the University as in `Town and Gown'.

Greats.
Study of classics or philosophy at Oxford.

Half-blue.
See `blue'.

Hall.
Communal eating place in college. For added confusion, some colleges
are called Halls.

Head of the River.
Winning crew or college in Eights Week or Torpids. A bump supper may
be in order. Also the name of the next pub up the river from the finishing
line, at Folly Bridge.

The High.
Short for the `High Street'. Also `the Broad', `the Turl', etc.

High Table.
Dinner for Dons and guests only. Highly recommended experience if
your liver can take it. Don't drive home afterwards!

Hilary.
Spring term. (cf., Michaelmas and Trinity.)

Isis.
Confusing name for the River Thames at Oxford (especially when rowing
on it). Also the name of an Oxford student magazine for those with
literary pretensions. (cf., Cherwell.)

The K.A.
Short for the King's Arms, probably the pub most frequented by students
in Oxford at the south end of Parks Road.

The Keble Road Triangle.
The trianglular area north of Keble Road next to the Parks acting
as an overflow for the Science Area.

LMH.
Short for `Lady Margaret Hall', one of the (ex-women's) colleges.

Long Vac.
Nothing to do with laborious house cleaning, but instead, summer holidays.
See `vac'.

The House.
Pompous name for Christ Church.

M.A.
Master of Arts. You simply have to survive 21 terms (7 years) after
you matriculate to get this degree, with a few provisos, like getting
your B.A., not being in prison, etc. See `convocation' for your rights.
You have to pay extra if you don't turn up in person to collect your
M.A., since you are then not doing your bit for the tourist trade.
Many colleges also give you a good lunch so it's worth making an appearance.

The Master.
See the President.

Manciple.
One of the most important people in a college, responsible for the
food! A little-used word that seems to be making a minor comeback.

Matriculation.
Ceremony in the Sheldonian for admission to Oxford as a student.

May morning.
1st May when a large number of people get up very early in Oxford,
listen to a carol sung from the top of Magdalen College Tower at 6
a.m. and then do generally silly things, especially if they are a
student. Worth getting up for if you have never been or it is a nice
sunny morning.

MCR.
Middle Common Room - for graduate students. (cf., JCR and SCR.)

Medic.
Short for `medical student'. When you have met a few of them, you'll
never want to be ill again. Normally the booziest collection of students
in the University.

Mercury
The statue in the middle of the main quad of Christ Church. This is
surrounded by a small pond which the more aesthetic undergraduates
sometimes frequent after a contretemps with a group of hearties.

Michaelmas.
Autumn term. (cf., Hilary and Trinity.)

Mods.
Short for `Moderations'. Intermediate exams, normally at the end of
the first year. A class is awarded but it doesn't count towards (or
against!) your finals.

Mortar-board.
Not for brick-layers, but an academic cap with a hard flat square
top and a tassel in the middle. It sounds silly and it is silly! Women
normally wear a floppy equivalent.

OUP.
The Oxford University Press in Walton Street. Much of the printing
side of the operation closed down in recent years apart from local
work for the University, but the publishing side of the business is
still flourishing. In particular, its dictionaries are world famous;
see the Bibliography on page for more information. There is an OUP
shop in the High Street if you want to buy one.

Over-bump.
If two eights bump, the following eight could still `bump' the eight
which was three in front, thus causing an `over-bump'. Still confused?

Oxbridge.
Oxford and Cambridge Universities.

Oxfam.
Short for `Oxford Committee for Famine Relief'. Charity founded and
still based in Oxford. There are several shops around Oxford, including
one in Broad Street and a second-hand bookshop half way up St. Giles
on the left hand side. Recommended.

Oxford.
Yes there was a ford here once and I suppose oxen probably did cross
it. See Oxford city coat of arms for a picture.

Oxford bags.
Trousers that are several sizes too large. Not so popular nowadays.
(See also `debag'.)

Oxford Blue.
A good dark blue colour, as on the University coat of arms. Not to
be confused with Cambridge Blue, a pale imitation of the real thing!

Oxford Campaign.
Appeal by the University for £200 million. Have you any money
to spare? £4 million is allocated for a new Computing Laboratory
building behind 8-11 Keble Road, so if you are feeling generous please
contact our administrator (although the Wolfson building is now complete)!

The Oxford Dikker of Quotaggers.
Oxford-speak for the Oxford Dictionary of Quotations. A useful reference
source for another appendix.

The Oxford English Dictionary.
The biggest dictionary in the world (16 volumes), also know as the
for short! The latest edition is available on paper, CD-ROM and even
on-line if you pay (which Oxford University haven't so we can't!).
If you want an Oxford Dictionary, try the Oxford University Press
shop on the south side of the High Street.

An Oxford man.
A compliment. (cf., a Cambridge man.)

Oxford Marmalade.
A supposed great favourite on the English breakfast table. See `Frank
Cooper'.

Oxon.
Short for the Latin for `of Oxford (University)' (Oxoniensis).

Oxymoron.
Not what you think - you can look it up if you don't know. You'll
find it boringly interesting.

The Parks.
University Park, north of the Science Area. Locked at night. A good
place to sit in a deck chair and watch cricket in the summer. Excellent
for informal workshops!

Parson's Pleasure.
On the river, where men, until recently, used to sport themselves
in their altogether. Only embarrassing if you recognise your tutor!
Ladies could alight on the bank and walk round instead of punting,
but rarely did. Best enjoyed when travelling with a medic who knows
all the Latin names of their various ailments! (cf., Dame's Delight.)

Pimms.
Cocktail of spirits, lemonade, mint, fruit, ice, etc. Best enjoyed
outside on a hot summer's day at Eights Week and the like. Worth trying
at least once. If you like it, you can buy a bottle at the Heathrow
Duty Free Shop on the way home.

The Playhouse.
The Oxford University theatre in Beaumont Street, sadly closed recently
due to lack of funds, but now happily reopened. Do go - you may see
a future star from O.U.D.S.

POD.
Pocket Oxford Dictionary from the OUP. Probably only pocket-sized
if you are wearing Oxford bags!

Porter.
Guard at the front door of each college. Can be helpful if you don't
look like a tourist.

Porter's lodge.
Den of the porter at each college front entrance. This must normally
be passed with care to gain entrance to a college.

Praelector.
Senior fellow.

Prelims.
Short for `Preliminaries'. Like Mods but you don't get a class.

The President.
See the Principal.

The Principal.
See the Provost.

Proctors.
The University authorities in charge of the bulldogs, University rules,
etc.

Procurator.
Procurer of money.

The Provost.
See the Rector.

Punt.
Flat-bottomed boat for enjoyment on the river, especially the Cherwell,
in summer months. Strawberries and Champagne or Pimms also recommended.
You `punt' (with a pole) from the sloping end at the back rather than
the flat end. In Cambridge they punt from the other end, but to avoid
confusion both ends are flat in Cambridge. You can draw your own conclusions.
First rule of punting: always hang on to the punt rather than the
pole. You'll have to find out the rest of the rules by trying it.

Quad.
Rectangular courtyard inside a college. Don't walk on the grass -
this is reserved for Dons! (cf., `court' in Cambridge.)

Queen's Award.
Recently awarded jointly for Technological Achievement to Inmos Ltd
and the Oxford University Computing Laboratory (OUCL) for work using
formal methods to design the transputer floating-point unit in 1990
and to IBM UK and OUCL for work using Z in the devopment of the CICS
transaction processing system in 1992. Coveted by British industry,
very few academic institutions have won this award.

Rag Week.
Students doing various silly things for charity.

The Rector.
See the Dean.

A second.
See class.

Scholarship.
This used to pay for your time at Oxford if you were poor and clever.
However, inflation being what it is, a scholarship is now mainly honorary
(you get about £50 a year) but you do get a bigger gown for
extra protection at meal times. See also `exhibition'.

The Science Area.
The area mainly between the Parks and South Parks Road where most
of the University science departments are located. See also the Keble
Road Triangle.

Sconce.
From the Concise Oxford Dictionary: (Oxford Univ.) inflict forfeit
(or penalty involving drinking) of beer etc. (e.g., a yard of ale)
for offence against table etiquette upon (member of company or his
offence).

Schools.
Short for `examination schools'. The ultimate horror for many students.
You may request a pint of ale during the exam, but only if you are
wearing your ceremonial sword!

Scout.
Person who cleans college rooms. Used to be more like a servant in
the `good old days'. Tip recommended for good service. (cf., `bedder'
in Cambridge).

SCR.
Senior Common Room - for Fellows. (cf., JCR and MCR.)

Sent down.
To be forcibly expelled by the University or College authorities.
See also `come up' and `go down'.

The Sheldonian.
Short for the Sheldonian Theatre, where matriculation and degree ceremonies
are held.

Shepherd and Woodward
The University clothes shop on the south side of the High. The place
to go if you want a D.J., (new) gown, mortar-board, college scarf,
tie, sweat-shirt, cuff links, etc. If they don't have what you want,
you could also try Walter's in the Turl.

Spoonerism.
The accidental or deliberate transposition of the initial letters
etc. of two or more words in a phrase. E.g.,

``You have tasted a whole worm. You have hissed my mystery lectures.
You were caught fighting a liar in the quad. You will leave by the
next town drain.''

Named after Revd. William Archibald Spooner (1844-1930) who was
Warden of New College, although many `original' spoonerisms are now
known to be apocryphal.

Sporting the oak.
Many (some - oh alright, a few) college rooms have two doors. If the
outer door is open, then the occupant is willing to receive visitors;
if closed, the occupant is `sporting the oak' and does not wish to
be disturbed.

Statutes.
Normally strange set of rules set down by the founder of each college.
For example, the laundress at New College must be ``of such age and
condition that no sinister suspicion can, or ought to fall on her.''

St. Giles' Fair.
A traditional fair held on the first Monday and Tuesday of each September
in St. Giles. Recommended if you are around then, but go before 6
p.m. since the prices increase dramatically then, as do the crowds
and pickpockets. The Parks are closed for the day during the fair
to prove that they are owned by the University and are not a public
right of way.

The stacks.
A system to squeeze more books into the Bod. Books are stored on shelves
which are right next to each other but may be rolled about to get
at the books. You have to order a book which is in the stacks and
somebody will go and try to find it for you. Rumour has it that the
Bodleian is down to its last 10 miles of shelving and it fills them
up at a mile a year. The normal remedy is to dig a new hole somewhere
and attach it to the rest of the system by a tunnel. The vast majority
of the Bodleian is underground so you may not be impressed by its
size from the top. It is one of six copyright libraries in Britain,
so it automatically gets a free copy of every book published in Britain.
Hence the reason why it fills its empty shelves so fast.

Student.
Lowest form of life at Oxford, but some aspire to greater things.

Tails.
Formal dark suit with long dangly bits (the ``tails'') at the back
of the jacket. See `White Tie'.

Teddy Hall.
Affectionate name for St. Edmund Hall. I'm afraid there are not many
teddies to be found here, although you can now buy a Teddy Hall (and
other college) teddies in the local gift shops.

A third.
See class.

Torpids.
The other college rowing event, held in Hilary term. Eights Week is
the big summer event - it's a bit cold in February!

Town.
Not referred to in polite University circles.

Townee.
Towns-person who is not a member of the University.

Town and Gown.
Oxford City and University, especially in opposition to each other.

Trinity.
Summer term. (cf., Hilary and Michaelmas.) Also a college.

The Turl.
See the High.

Tutor.
College teacher. Most students have a `tutorial' with a tutor at least
once a week in term time when they have to think of excuses for what
they have been doing all week. There are normally only one or two
students present at a tutorial, so it is the one time of the week
when they have to be on their toes. Otherwise a student life is quite
a restful one.

The Union.
Confusing name for the University debating society. Not a Student
Union in the usual sense. Many famous and infamous British politicians
have started their careers here.

Univ.
Short for `University College'. This is not to be confused with the
University; however it is of course the oldest college. Legend has
it that King Alfred founded it, but unfortunately he lived a couple
of hundred years earlier than the generally agreed foundation date
(1249)!

Vac.
Definitely not a vacuum cleaner, but short for `vacation'. Name for
holidays, because the students are also meant to work for their `collections'
during these. Full term (when lectures are held) is only eight weeks
long, so you get quite a lot of vacation time for extra study.

Vice-Chancellor.
The head of the University who is here. Normally somebody you haven't
heard of. (cf., the Chancellor.)

The Visitor.
The equivalent of the Chancellor for a college.

Viva.
Short for `Viva Voce'. Oral exam, especially a D.Phil. or if you are
a borderline case.

White Tie.
Formal attire with white bow tie and tails for very posh occasions.
Worn at the more exclusive college balls. (cf., Black Tie.)

A yard of ale.
Nowadays officially known as a `metre of lager' due to EC regulations,
you normally have to drink one of these if you are `sconced'. In essence,
it is a lot of beer in a very long glass.