"Well, that's not so unusual. Look, I used to have a girlfriend, she'd
NEVER let me fuck her up the ass, no matter WHAT I did. I even offered to
pay her. I even offered to take her out to dinner at Burger King. She still
refused." - blond guy in proctological supply company

There is a simple script that displays a random message from a database of quotes (as in well-know fortunes game).
This version is bundled with quotations from The Bible, The Talmud, The Koran, poetry, prose, famous people and books, humorous items.