What you need here is a boombox blaring turgid, unlistenable noise and a microphone that terribly distorts your voice, along with several bottles of tequila to share with/throw at passersby. For the extra mile, get your friends to dress up as Die Antwoord, show up at the party before you, and be generally way more enjoyable.

Shirtless Rick Ross

Take off your shirt. Make this face. Now hold it for three hours.

Kanye West + Ballet Dancers

And not like fat guys in tutus, either--actual professional ballet dancers. Commit to this. He did! (And don't forget the Horus chain.)