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Work, family, relationships, finances, illness, change…the variety of ways stress comes into
our lives presents us all with a challenge. There is no one way to reduce and manage stress. But, it is universally accepted that less stress is better. So, the first important step is identification. You can’t fix what you don’t acknowledge. You know you feel it, just identify and accept what causes stress for you. Don’t worry about if it would cause stress for someone else or if you believe it is less stressful and worthy of attention than what someone else may be experiencing. Your life, your stress, and your job to handle it. Own it and then you can fix it. Identify each stress and your response.

Good stressors, like a promotion or a new baby, are still stressors. Negative stressors, like hectic schedules or holding grudges, need attention. Internal stressors, such as striving for perfection, must be managed. External stressors, such as deadlines at work, must be given an outlet. We need positive and effective coping skills to enjoy physical, emotional, & mental wellness. The first step is identifying what is stressing you. The next step is identifying what you can do to reduce & manage your stress.

Just do it

We all know the top tips for managing stress I bet. Get enough sleep, eat right, exercise, meditate/pray, play, take time for yourself…blah, blah, blah. That is what you expect me to say, right? Well, I’d love to report that I have new information and there is now a pill. You can take this pill and your stress will be relieved; you will sail through adversity without a tight muscle or added pound; you will glide through 17 dance, gymnastic, and soccer practices a week, help with homework, and still prepare healthy meals with a smile and a hug; and you can immediately dismiss hurt feelings and apologize to your spouse without shedding a tear! Ummmmm…not gonna happen! Here’s the truth: in this life there will be trouble (John 16:33), we will have stress, good and bad, and we get to decide if we manage stress or if stress gets to call all the shots, even determining our health. So just do it.

So, as your friendly u.b.healthy coach and mentor, I’d like to gently encourage you to pay attention! Today is the day to make changes and decrease the impact of stress on your physical body as well as your mental health. The stress level you live with impacts not only you, but everyone around you. (As does your effective or not-so-effective set of coping skills) None of us get to try today over again…this is it. This is not like Solitaire where you can play and then hit the button to “replay this game” now that you see the correct moves. The impact of stress is very real inside our bodies and chronic stress is very damaging in the short-term as well as the long-term. It is time for us to take stress management seriously and enjoy our lives more each and every day.

Usually I try to stay positive in my approach here, but I feel the need to help us all identify some poor and ineffective coping habits regularly on display all around us:

Denial/Suppression

Isolation

Procrastination

Indulging addictions (food, alcohol, shopping, gambling, drugs, etc.)

Ranting/Rage

I’m sure this list is not exhaustive, but it covers a lot of the most common “fails”. These strategies create more stress and perpetuate dysfunction in our lives. Procrastination is probably the culprit if you read this and say to yourself, “this is true, I do need to manage stress differently”, and then get up and get a snack.

Change is a choice and is often difficult. These types of ineffective coping skills were probably modeled in our homes and are reinforced daily everywhere we look. But making changes in how we manage stress has enormous rewards. Rewards for us personally, our families, and our co-workers. So, yes, I’m encouraging you to slow down, take time for yourself, eat a healthy and balanced diet, exercise, enjoy being outside, breathe deeply, meditate, pray, spend time with friends, have fun, laugh, play, sleep, eliminate grudges and comparisons to others, and share with trusted friends the concerns on your heart. Take time to share, but also to listen, to advice from people who know you, love you, and have your best interest at heart. This is your one shot at today, don’t just wish it was over, decide to enjoy it.

“Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.” – Winnie the Pooh