Everybody knows that since Atlus took over management of Shin Megami Tensei Imagine, they’ve been working their asses off to more or less “live up to the (preconceived) ideals” that had been formed and set up during the tenure of the game with Aeria. As such, one of the things that many people (grudgingly, myself included) were hoping that Atlus would do right was the Game Sage program. In theory, the community concept of these is a number of volunteer players “representing” the managing company (previously Aeria, now Atlus), with the primary mission of being an intermediary between the Game Masters and the playerbase, as well as being available to help out players that need a hand with anything. (Secondary roles include organizing events and so on, but that’s irrelevant to the point of this post.) For reasons I shall not discuss here nor will consent anyone discussing in the comments with the threat of deleting any post that does, Atlus decided they wouldn’t be named Sages, but went for the completely ridiculous “Buddy-Buds”. How the bloody ever-loving fuck you can take that fucking name seriously is way, WAY beyond me, but I digress.

For the most part, I am surprisingly okay with most of the list of people currently chosen as Sages (I refuse on principle calling them what Atlus calls them, mainly on the grounds of how ridiculous it is).

However, as with everything in the universe, where the wise dwell, the idiots creep up.

I guess the most painful event was hitting my testicles with an electrical cable that snapped like a whip due to an unexpectedly forceful pull from the person at the other end of the line (and yes, it fucking hurt like fucking bloody fuck… fuck — no amount of expletives can express the pain I suffered or could quench my thirst for unleashing them upon the world when I was doubled down on the floor, reeling from the unexpected attack to my anatomy).

On a slightly unrelated note, the most irking thing that’s happened these past few days was that for whatever reason, after I installed MegaManX8 and Resident Evil 4 again on my laptop, Resident Evil 5 and Street Fighter 4 decided to not work anymore, so had to uninstall them both and right now I’m having Steam download/install both again. Fuck.

On the good side, however, there HAVE been a few beacons of light amongst the shadows here and there:

The first would be the fact that apparently, I unconsciously stepped up my Super Street Fighter 4 Arcade Edition game and was able to stand my ground as Ken against a RIDICULOUSLY good, international-tournament-level Akuma. Knowing that I was able to make life difficult for a dude that goes hand in hand with some of the best players around the world makes me feel incredibly pleased with myself.

And secondly, this…

-Has withdrawn from any social activity on the forums, you will only see me participate in events-

A few years ago, Apple sold me a $4,000 computer with a defective graphics chip/logic board. The defective part was the Nvidia 8600M GT GPU, and when it was discovered that the machine was defective, Apple refused to take it back and issue me a refund. Instead, they promised to replace the 8600M GT boards when they failed, up to 4 years from the date of purchase.

Three years later, the board failed, and predictably, Apple refused to replace it. Instead, they used the fact that the machine wouldn’t boot (due to the failed logic board) to deny the repair. Not only that, but in addition, they tried to charge me a hefty sum of money to have it replaced, knowing full well that Nvidia pays for the full repair cost.

[…]

Three and a half months ago, after having my repair denied, I announced on this very site that I was going to sue Apple. Reading these lawsuit threats often, many people assumed that I was bluffing or blowing off steam, but true to my word, I did exactly what I said I was going to do. I sued Apple. […]

Why? Because echoing this post, for my parents I am the go-to dude to solve ANYTHING FUCKING REMOTELY RELATED TO COMPUTERS, even if it’s something so fucking simple that a fucking DONKEY can do it while fucking blinded. And I am absolutely not in the slightest fucking bit interested in doing ANYTHING for them, because they’re the kind of people that go “don’t teach me, just fucking do it” and when they fuck it all up “I didn’t do anything”.

I want to move to fucking Australia, as far the fuck away as I possibly can.

Next thing you know, RapidShare, MediaFire and the rest of the online locker sites will be taken down with the same bullshit claim.

All because of something I said before: the MPAA and the RIAA are fucking AFRAID of the fact that with the internet, they no longer have sole and unique control over creative content, and that they no longer will be able to monopolize the entire business of intellectual property by ENSLAVING the actual content creators.

This is what it’s like BEFORE SOPA and PIPA. Imagine what it’ll be like AFTER them.

Last week I was in an elevator at 3pm with some nice people, patiently going downwards, stopping at every other floor for no reason because when most people in Guiyang want to call an elevator they hit both up and down regardless of which way they want to go (because China). Then the elevator suddenly dropped a foot or so (felt like way farther, but couldn’t have been more than that), then shot to the 26th floor, then shot down to floor 1. We exited, confused and frightened, and a nice repairman explained that he assumed it was empty and was just about to do some repairs. Why would he assume that? Because China.

I went to a Pizza Hut with some friends a few days ago. (The Pizza Hut in Guiyang is one of the nicest restaurants in the city, partially because Chinese Pizza Huts are really nice places, and partially because Guiyang is a wasteland, which I say in an endearing way.) We ask if we can get a large pizza that’s half one thing and half another. Nope, they don’t do that. Okay, sure. We ordered a large pizza. Nope, they’re out of large pizzas. Okay, that actually doesn’t make any sense, but sure, we’ll take a medium vegetable garden and a medium pepperoni, and a pitcher of pepsi. We can’t give you a pizza with only pepperoni on it. Bullshit, yes, you can. Nope. Okay, whatever, not in the mood, give me the meat pizza. We get a small cup of pepsi and a medium pizza, half of which is vegetable garden and half of which is meat. I check the receipt. The receipt reflects what we ordered, both in English and Chinese. The waitress is at a loss to explain the theoretically impossible and utterly incorrect pizza. Why did they serve us that? Because China. (The previous time we went, we were served seven identical pizzas, having ordered three and paid for three, again because China.)

In the last month, I have been asked by different cab drivers,
(1) how much whores are in America,
(2) whether military service is compulsory in America,
(3) if my parents are upset that I am 26 and unmarried, and
(4) if I’ve got a big dick, or maybe if we (Americans) have big dicks, I’m not sure.

But why do they think these are good questions to ask a guy who is trying to get to work? Because China.

A couple weeks ago, in the middle of the road I saw a twenty-five-foot-or-so ladder, being held upright by two men. It was unsupported by anything else. At the top was another man, working on a power line, with nothing to brace him, bolster him, or hold him but the ladder being held by two dudes. Cars were swerving all around them. Nobody found this exceptional. Because, again, China.

It’s not a land in which the foreigner suffers. It is not a hostile land or a wild land. It is, rather, a land of pointless minor absurdities and wholly unnecessary inconveniences, which coalesce to infuriate the ill-tempered and delight the rest. When I first arrived, I was informed by a nice older gentleman, “[FIRSTNAME], do not ever ask ‘why’ here. You can ask yourself any other question, and the answers will enlighten you. But do not ask ‘why,’ because here, there is no ‘why.’” And he was right. The answer — the only answer — to “why” is “because China.”

MOST RETARDED THING THE UNITED STATES HAS COME UP WITH IN THE LAST TEN YEARS.

Giving so-called “copyright holders” basically the legal and constitutional ability to essentially fucking CENSOR THE MOTHERFUCKING INTERNET at their whim and leisure?

No thanks, I’m not as much of an idiot as Hollywood’s money would have the US congress believe.

And yes, I used lowercase for the word congress. Their current stupidity/abuse of power/profiteering doesn’t merit my using a capital initial to refer to them.

Thus, my website header is now censored and will remain so until a decision about SOPA is reached. The hearing will reconvene next Wednesday and NOT in 2012 as their dirty tactics would have had us believe initially. So those of you who live in the US, find the phone number of your representative’s office and KEEP CALLING THEM.

Do you really think yourself such a great troll? When you consider that you always try to get in my conversations, that you absolutely FAIL at internettrolling, and despite the fact that I openly ignore you, you ALWAYS fail at attempting to blend in, plus the fact that you spew so much shit out of that hole in your face you call a mouth that I have no idea how you can still speak with all the shit dribbling on your chin, I frankly don’t understand how ANYONE still takes you seriously.

You know BULLSHIT about this game. All you know you didn’t even learn; you’ve COPIED from others. I don’t even think you properly know how damage works. All you are is the same kind of imbecile that proliferated when spirit infusion made it to Aeria’s servers: A PVP-obsessed Megi-spamming idiot. I’ve actually been wondering why this hasn’t been made an official build on the Aeria forums, and I’m surprised you haven’t been made a GS yet. You would fit so well with other braindead coprophagic Aeria drones like Dojan, Kalaydo and the like.