"I know my wife is in love with another man. . ."

Dear Kristine:

I found out last night that my wife is cheating on me. I'm not sure she's having a full-tilt-boogie affair - but I know she's in love with another man. Kristine, what should I do? Should I speak with her right away? Should I kill the guy? I know his family and where he works. I'm so angry I don't know where to turn. Please help. - Spirited Husband

Dear Sprited: Your question raises other questions. First - are you certain you want to find out the "truth" about your wife's current behavior? If you do, how will you face it? If you are not clear how you would deal with the "worst case scenario," I advise you to look away, wait this out and hope for the best.

If you cannot ignore this, however, then you must confront it, head-on.

To do so means being strong in your affection for your wife You must feel the commitment to your marriage; to the importance of working through this difficult time. Fill your heart with love for her - then confront her with your suspicions. Tell her what and why you suspect her.

Assure her you will not leave her. Tell her how much she means to you - how much you love her. Do NOT tell her you value her for anything other than the love you share; don't mention the kids, her job, her good housekeeping - mention only your love. If you want to work to make this right, tell her how hard you will work.

Writing for the theatre requires imagination, enthusiasm and stamina. Working in the gardens of the Cozy Cottage provides all three. If you're ever in St. Paul, Minnesota, stop by to see me. I'll be certain to pick a bouquet for you to take on the road, and pour you a cup of the coffee that makes Como Park famous. - Kristine

Some folks think that color detracts from language. I feel the opposite. Throwing the delight of nature into the center of a story deepens the appeal of the plot. Listen for the way in which the environment explodes in my work - you'll appreciate the power of the peony and the quiet trust of the new tulip.