Reader. Writer. Romantic.

I supposed that it’s half my fault
For the pain that I have gone through
In these last few weeks
Because when I admitted to myself
That I loved you
I opened up my heart
And let you in
Let you in to wreak havoc
And destroy me from with in

I never knew this would happen
But with my boundless optimism
I should have predicted as much

In my days of pessimism
The days in which I would constantly berate myself
When I had no self-esteem
I was better off

I never expected
I never hoped
I always knew
I’d never find love

I’ve tried and failed
So many times
That I should know better than to fall in love

Love can lift you
Love can make you a better person than you ever were before
But love can destroy you
Burn you down without a care
It’s a double edged sword
That I could once handle

But to experience failure
To never be able to be loved
Has slowly worn away at me

I’ve lost all hope
That I’ll be happy in a relationship
As much as I want to be loved
I don’t want to hurt this much ever again