Monday, October 18, 2010

I know I already gave y’all the craft show update from the St. John’s show on October 11th. But I left out a very big part of the story, as that post was getting long. And this part needed to be separate anyway. You will see why.

It’s no big secret that I’ve been going through a lot lately with pain, intractable chronic daily migraines and now hemiplegic migraines, which brings occasional sudden paralysis to my right side and with it an inability to make art. To say the least, my emotional state has not been great all the time. This has been difficult to accept and get through sometimes. I get mad. I cry a lot. Much lamenting is done about wanting to just quit all this. Yeah. It’s bad.

Last Monday was a big smack in the face about why I keep going despite all this suffering. It’s about LOVE.

I already told you about how I got sick Sunday night and my mom, Heather and Mr. M packed up for me and did the set up Monday morning. That was about LOVE. Specifically their LOVE for me and their belief in my work. Then my LOVE for them deepens because they totally didn’t have to do all that but they did and I LOVE them even more for it.

Fast forward to around noon on Monday. I finally make it to the show. I’m there with my mom and Mr. M at my booth. Lots of people at the show are commenting on how beautiful my work is. People are buying. More LOVE.

Then something strange started to happen. People started to show up just to see me. My twin sister came with her 2 small children; my father arrived; my friend Christi came (who works 70 hours a week and I never get to see her so I was so happy to see her); my good pals Heather and Maggie (who really helped a lot to get me ready for this show); my new friends Jack and Lorraine (who were old acquaintances and now are good friends thanks to Twitter and Facebook); a friend from high school who I have not seen since 1993 (who we caught up with through Facebook and through which he was spammed by me about the show); a totally random coincidental meeting of a youth group leader from when I was maybe 14 or 15 who lives in Charleston and was visiting Rochester and happened to be at the show; and (finally) my mom’s very helpful neighbor who came to help us pack up as Mr. M had left to go to work.

Including my mom and Mr. M that is 14 people total. My booth was a rocking party all day long. People, food, laughter, hugs. LOVE. One person would show up and go and then another would show up so it was spread out all through the day.

Then add all the people who stopped to just look and/or buy my work. And add other vendors who knew me and my work through other people or being online who wanted to meet me. That was weird. LOVE LOVE LOVE. Throw in a couple 55-gallon drums of validation while you are at it.

I was starting to wonder when the “This Is Your Life” cameras were going to pop out from behind a corner. Seriously. None of the other vendors were having loud reunions with friends all day. I wonder if we got to be annoying after a while!

I am getting all misty just writing about this. I think The Universe may be trying to tell me something like, “Good grief, woman! Don’t you feel all this LOVE? You can’t off yourself! Imagine all of these people at your funeral. How could you do that to them? They really really LOVE you!”

So I feel the LOVE. I feel it in my chest so much that literally my heart aches with all this LOVE. And, yes, now I am crying full blown tears as I write. Wah. This isn’t going to appreciate itself, people!

How did I get so lucky? What set all this good in motion? Me? How on earth could that be?

There are not words in this language to accurately express the depth of my gratitude to have this kind of LOVE happen in a time of such suffering and desperation from a loss of hope that this pain will ever go away and I will get my life back. But then again this LOVE has been around me all along. It just happened to kick me in the pants all at once in one day last week. Quite powerful stuff!

Yes, Universe, I am listening. I am spinning string made with this LOVE and how it makes me feel safe, valued and needed and I am weaving it in and out through my ribs and around my heart so I won’t forget it; so it will be my light through the yucky dark places.

4 comments:

WOW! And yes, it IS about the love! People who don't craft for the love of their art don't "get" why we keep doing it. Sales are great, but man, that validation about "Oh, I LOVE your work!" just makes my day, every stinkin' time.

And Saturday, after my show, one of my fellow vendors' entire family stopped by and stood there, arms folded, until I caved and let them drag all my stuff to the curb for me. I love this "community". They are my lifeblood.

And you with the reunion booth happening! WOWZA! It sounds like a fabulous day!

Post a Comment

ShareThis

Hey! Who Is This?!

As a self-taught, mixed-media collage artist I am powerless to the draw of finding a way to mix this with that. My work centralizes around my love of paper. I currently dabble in making fine art paper collage jewelry and accessories from game pieces such as dominoes and checkers.