Category: clandestine classics

It was recently announced there will be a new line of novels released by Clandestine Classics where erotic scenes will be added to classic novels.

I’m not talking about parody here, not the way I’ve parodied with gay storylines from straight films or classics. In fact, I dare anyone to read my gay version of “Gay Pride and Prejudice” and find one single line or passage in my book that’s even remotely identical to the original “Pride and Prejudice.” You won’t find it. I parodied the basic storyline, with regard to prejudice as it applies to gay men and marriage, and title, not the original book.

But from what I gather in this article on gawker this project from Clandestine Classics will be taking the original books verbatim and adding highly erotic sex scenes. And to think I wasted all that time making sure I didn’t take anything verbatim from the original scripts or books!

Many nerds have reacted poorly to the news that their favorite novels are being reimagined as glorified fan fiction, labeling the works “glorified fan fiction,” and arguing that “any intelligent reader can pick up on [the original texts’] sexual tension without [it] being spelled out.”

No comment from me. I still get hell for writing parodies of pop culture films with gay characters and a lot of gay sex, even though every single word is different from the original. In most cases I shifted away from the original plots and characters so much only the titles have been parodies. And I’ve always twisted and turned these plots into social or political statements about gay men. If you check out “A Christmas Carl,” you’ll see that one of the ghosts is actually the infamous Quentin Crisp. And, there’s a mention of a Christmas in the future in that same book where Hillary Clinton is ninety years old and she actually becomes president. I think THAT’S an example of parody. But what do I know?

I don’t think it’s just going to be Jane Austen books.

Other works scheduled to be released in porn-e-book form include: Dracula, Treasure Island, The Three Musketeers and the Phantom of the Opera. Excerpts from several of the releases are available on the Clandestine Classics website.

Sorry, no links. You’ll have to look that one up on your own.

In any event, I have a feeling these books from Clandestine are going to become very popular. And I’m still going to write my version of “Singing in the Rain,” and I’m titling it “Banging in the Rain,” this time (smile). The Debbie Reynolds character will look a lot like Justin Beiber.

What I can’t wait to see is the rush of Internet sockpuppts who will be running over to goodreads and Amazon who haven’t read any of these redesigned books, but will think nothing of rating and reviewing them poorly just for sport. It should be very entertaining.