Saturday, August 11, 2012

Keeping the Little in Your Girl Pt 6

"The average tween girl will absorb 38 hours a week of video games, computer time, music, television, radio, and print. If she is at a public or private school for another 35 hours a week, that doesn't leave you much time to be the primary molder of her value system. What's a Mom to do?"

1. Set limits in terms of screen time - this includes all screens such as computers, iPods, TV, gaming systems, and movies.

2. Turn off all screens during mealtimes. I cannot even imagine watching TV during dinner, but I know many families do. This is such a great time to talk {and listen} to each family member. What a special time!

3. Set a good example by being physically active and by limiting your own screen time {gulp}. Yes, our children are watching. The greatest lesson they learn is the one they see us living out each day. It is good to turn off the screens {even my little smartphone} and take time to play with the kids and be busy working in our home. That is my job, isn't it?

When your kids are watching TV or on the computer, make sure you know what they are watching. Use it as teachable moments when there is an example of sin and help her interpret the messages as the media attempts to brainwash her. You should even pre-screen some things before she is even allowed to look at it. Dannah had some of the lyrics from a Lady Gaga song and wow! I cannot believe any parent would allow their child to listen to that *stuff*.

Also be sure to address what it means to be truly beautiful as she is watching these teen pop stars on TV. No one looks like they do on TV {even the pop stars themselves} in real life. It seems to be more and more of a struggle to have a healthy body image with these twiggy stars on every magazine cover with flawless faces and incredible hair. It is no wonder that "one-third of 10-year-old girls are worried about their weight."

Be sure she knows that even though man looks at the outer appearance, God looks at the heart. That is what is truly important.

Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. {Proverbs 31:30}

Unbrand her!

Don't let the media tell her what looks cool and that it is OK to run around in super short shorts and tank tops that used to be considered underwear! I am appalled when I go out and see what little clothing {and large amounts of make-up} these little girls are wearing - and they are with their parents!! It isn't like they are even sneaking out of the house and changing how they look in the mall bathroom.

The Lord tells us that, "Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." {1 Peter 3:3-4}

It is ok to want to look nice, but this does not have to involve showing so much flesh and trying to make a 13 year old girl look like a mature woman.

So what can a Mom do?

Practice modesty yourself. Be an example.

"Make a new goal for yourself - and help your tween daughter establish the habit of spending more time in God's Word each day than she does in front of the mirror. It's easy - if you spend 15 minutes getting ready each morning, you need to spend 15 minutes with God. If you spend 30 minutes painting your face and spraying your hair, you need to spend 30 minutes with God." {double gulp}. That sure is convicting!

Dannah also lists out several "Truth or Bare" tests that are great ways to see how modest your tween's clothes {and your own} really are. This is a great way to talk about her body and how it is precious and beautiful, but it is also private and to be saved for when she is older and married. It is a gift for her Prince Charming.

How will you pass the Truth or Bare tests? I dare - no double dog dare - you to click over to her website and see how your outfit checks out.

I am so thankful for the wisdom in this book! Have you been reading along? What are your views on screen time and modesty? Will there be any changes made around your house?

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