You think the Seattle Seahawks escaped with a win Monday night? That was nothing compared to the locked-out officials' coup of a victory.

You think the crowd at CenturyLink Field was loud Monday night? You should have heard the roars inside of referees' homes across the country.

I know this is a family paper, but I'm about to tell you a sick-and-twisted joke: What do you call a group that makes an average of $150,000 a year and is being offered a 401K for working a weekend job?

Victims.

At least that's what most of America believes now.

For three weeks, the NFL's locked-out officials had been watching a beautiful symphony play out before their eyes, and Monday night was the crescendo. Every note leading up to the climax had been struck with the utmost precision -- from one replacement official scheduled to referee a Saints game being outed as a Saints fan, to another spotting the ball 27 yards upfield instead of 15 because he mixed up the 44 yardlines, to another being conned out of of two challenges by 49ers coach Jim Harbaugh.

For the locked-out refs, likely watching the games from their Chesterfield sofas, it was like cashing in on 20 straight scratch-and-win tickets.

And then came Monday night -- when they hit the Powerball jackpot.

In the spirit of officiating, let's review a few calls. On the final play of the Seahawks-Packers game, after a bogus roughing-the-passer flag breathed life into Seattle's comeback chances, and after an absurd pass-interference call gave those same hopes CPR, Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson heaved the football 40 yards into the end zone, which replay clearly showed fell into the hands of Packers safety M.D. Jennings.

Stunningly, or from the perspective of the locked-out officials -- magically -- it was a ruled a Seahawks touchdown. And if the situation wasn't circus-like enough, the flying elephant came when another official simultaneously ruled it an interception, only to be outranked by his colleague.

If there were one million possible scenarios on that game-ending sequence, 999,999 of them would have given the locked-out officials less leverage. Within minutes, half of the NFL had taken to Twitter to blast the replacements and league commissioner Roger Goodell's refusal to bend in negotiations.

Even President Obama felt the need to weigh in, promulgating that the labor dispute had to be settled in order to return the locked-out refs to the field.

What better way to punctuate the conning of a nation than to have its leader be your mouthpiece?

Listen, the NFL does not need the elite officials to return. The referees may be willing to stay away from football, but you, my friend, can not.

You, like every other citizen of this country, have eight DVRs to ensure that you don't miss a snap between Cheetos runs. You, like your neighbors on either side, will forever know that Marshawn Lynch needs 102 more yards and a touchdown to give you the Fantasy Football victory.

You may call the refs blind, but the only set of eyes that really matters is the one fixated on your flatscreen, telling Mr. Nielsen and Mr. Goodell all they need to know. That as long as fans keep watching, sponsors will keep paying, and the money will keep flowing in.

More significantly, you should be feeling zero sympathy for these officials. They make an average of $150,000 a year and are being offered 401 Ks as America climbs out of one of its worst recessions. Goodell does not want to take this from them. He wants to deny them pensions -- which few Americans have -- and give them a smaller pay bump than they are demanding.

But the NFL can lose a billion dollars between the couch cushions, why don't they just pay up?

For the same reason any rich company wouldn't pay up if it's not affecting business.

Plus, a good portion of these refs have full-time jobs. Ed Hochuli is an Arizona-based lawyer. Scott Green runs a lobbying firm in D.C.

But even if officiating -- which includes seminars throughout the year and hours of film-breakdown throughout the week -- does prevent some from locking down full-time employment, we're still talking about an average of $150,000 per year with a 401 K!

Let me ask you something: Do you even care what their asking price is? Would you blink if they wanted $200,000 or $300,000? What about a million? America is so fixated on getting these refs back on the field, that they could demand to watch replays in 3-D and nobody would think twice.

Look, I'm not trying to say the replacement refs aren't Chicken McNuggets on a Ruth's Chris menu. As long as they're employed, the credibility of the league goes down.

But don't think the refs who are holding out aren't contributing to that decline. Their choice to sit is hurting the game just as much as the league's refusal to pay them more.

The truth is, they've been offered a pretty fair deal. They should take it.