A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see
that his
bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw
an
envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was
addressed to
"Dad." With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with
trembling
hands and read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had
to
elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene
with Mom
and you. I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she
is so
nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her
piercing,
tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much
older
than I am. But it's not only
the passion...Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in
the woods

And has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a
dream of
having many more children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact
that
marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for
ourselves
and trading it with the other people that live nearby for
cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for
Aids so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't worry Dad. I'm 15
and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure
that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your
grandchildren.

Love,

Your Son John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in
life than a report card.