Revealed

I spent 36 hours in silent meditation over New Years Eve and Day. The phones and AV systems were off, candles were lit, fireplaces burned upstairs and downstairs – quiet and stillness prevailed. I didn’t have extended sleep, but only napped for short periods. Language is insufficient to describe the experience that ensued.

“The Tao that can be spoken of is not the constant Tao”.

The experiences over the past couple of days have changed my perception of the boundary between the physical and spiritual realms. It's going to take a while to assimilate what I saw, digest it, and apply it to everyday being. What I saw seemed very real, but so different than what I'd imagined. I want to write about it now before my mind begins to rationalize it. I’m sharing this experience of New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day with you as my friends and you can choose to accept any part of it or ignore this all in its entirety.

Our material world seemed to be constructed of a vast membrane that holds all life in this realm – humans, plants, animals and the even soil from which it grows. I emerged from this physical layer as my spirit emerged from my physical body. It seemed that I was then suspended at a vantage point where I could observe the physical realm in its entirety.

I saw a flurry of spirit beings popping in and out of the membrane. They live in the material world while in the membrane and, for some reason not explained, are not aware of the spirit world until they again pop out of the membrane. Some spirits did not appear to be out for long before they re-entered the membrane -- others seemed to hover for a while in the cloud, but I couldn't track them. The membrane seemed energized by the spirits popping in and out of it.

Entering the physical realm precipitated loss of insight and awareness. I was struck by the dramatic shift to ignorance once inside (or through) the membrane. There was a pathetic quality to this lack of awareness, yet it was not revealed why this occurs. It may simply be a quality that goes with living in the physical world. I could sense beings in the physical realm who know of the truth – the enlightened ones, though they represented an extremely small percentage of the total population.

The laws governing the regions beyond the membrane appeared quite different and amenable to will. Space and time were distorted from what we are accustomed to experiencing in the physical realm. The laws of the physical realm don’t seem to apply. It was lighter and more free. Space and time were easily transversed. Complex concepts could be communicated without language.

Physical laws govern the material world and did not seem to be readily manipulated. Here I felt that one must accept the limitations of physical laws in order to live in the physical realm. Therefore, those residing within the membrane seemed to be best served by working within its restrictions rather than attempting to effect or expect spiritual solutions. Knowledge, understanding and awareness are very important to moving in the material realm freely and they are rare qualities here.

The immediate purpose for entering the physical realm seems to be to create and expand it, but the greater purpose(s) for creating it was not revealed. The material realm is a much newer realm than the spiritual realm(s) and appeared to be under construction -- there is allot of energy being put into creating it. Further, I had the sense that this is one of many realms and that realms exist within realms on a very vast scale.

I saw that we can be creative in this material world and allow what we do to succeed or fail without judgment – essentially, in an evolutionary manner. It’s a living laboratory. We can play here and experiment here, build things and allow them to be torn down – technology, political and social structures. There is no right or wrong – just an evolution of a dynamic spiritual slurry within this environment. Individual accomplishments seemed unimportant -- generations of accomplishment of entire cultures can be wiped out without hardly being noticed. Still, there seemed to be a motivation to create, maintain, expand, and perhaps refine the physical realm. So, while there is no lasting egoic accomplishment to be fulfilled, there was still a perception that our participation contributes to the greater will.

One important theme from both nights was the benefit and necessity in freeing one's self. On the first night, I was aware of a personal membrane that contains me -- each other being also has one. The numerous membranes interact dynamically with and flow past each other. Attachments can form with other membranes like sticky atrophic plaques that inhibit our free movement. I found that I could free myself by letting go and by not clinging to ideas, fears, anger, or material possession. Allowing my own membrane to flow smoothly and without restraint felt far healthier. Relationships could be maintained by dynamic free interaction rather than attachment; unhealthy attachments were simply let go. It was a very freeing experience as if my boat had been cut loose from the weeds it was stuck in.

This theme manifested differently on the second night. I saw that most beings in the material world carry around loads of junk that manifests about their spirit – like dust and mud, it seemed to accumulate with age, weighing the spirit down and preventing it from being healthy and able to move about freely. This was what struck me most about what was revealed – this accumulated junk is so crippling. It creates such an impediment to our progress here – it’s responsible for so much stupidity and unpleasantness. It was simply stunning, pathetic and sad to see how much junk physical beings carry around with them. I could see beings covered in junk trying to instruct others on how to manage in this realm – sincere, but vain attempts to help – the blind attempting to lead the blind. I perceived a great need to be free of this psychic junk and to convey or demonstrate to others ways to do this.

Negativity in the material realm appeared to be mostly due to the ignorance. I noticed many false leaders and teachers, often (but not always) well-intentioned, who were attempting to lead others while lost in their own ignorance.

Finally, I was struck by the sense that I was seeing things as I believe I saw them as a toddler. It took a while for me to understand why this had a very odd but familiar look. It's a very different perception of the world than that of an adult. Perhaps, what we see as adults is a trained illusion painted over truth while the toddler’s mind is undeveloped and unable to see the illusion. It's something I want to try to look at and notice.

This is only my perception of what I saw - it may be looked at and interpreted differently by someone else.

28 comments:

The junk that accumulates around one's spirit during life in the physical realm is part of the illusion the spirit experiences and the illusion is part of the junk. Insight past the illusion is the first step in the process of freeing oneself.

The "personal membrane that contain ... each ... being" is the ego that contains the personal universe -- everything we have manifested in the material realm. The attachments are interactions between egos -- clinging to something outside of one's universe, desirable or undesirable.

In your post you say: "Knowledge, understanding and awareness are very important to moving in the material realm freely and they are rare qualities here."

Later you add: "Negativity in the material realm appeared to be mostly due to the ignorance."

What is it that most all of us are ignorant of that you are referring to?

Perhaps the question is better phrased if I ask what is it that most of us miss - that is, what is it that most of us apparently do not see or accept - that leads to loss of understanding and awareness?

Your questions ask for clarification of a central theme of the visions. Thank you. I appreciate the opportunity to revisit this profound experience.

I believe I observed a conceptualized presentation of interactions between the subtle "spirit" realm and the material realm. The messages were intuitive, but distinctive. There was a sense that the vision was being presented to me though I wasn't made aware of the source or the identity of my guide.

There was a recognition that intellect, knowledge, reasoning, and other mind-based attributes are very important in the material realm. Yet, from the perspective of the subtle realm, those qualities are dreadfully faulty and error-prone; these processes are mind-dependent and, as such, don't exist within the subtle realm. The minds used by entities in the material realm have limited input mechanisms and limited cognitive processing abilities. Each is uniquely is prone to misinterpretation of events and a buildup of inaccurate ideas and concepts (the "junk", "dust" and "mud"). Therefore, actions within the material realm are often misguided even if intentions are good.

To say that the mind is misused might imply ill intent. Instead, it seemed more that the mind is typically misinformed due to its several limitations and accumulated "junk" - e.g., inaccurate ideas and concepts. Buddhist teachings later lead me to understand that much of this "junk" was due largely to a misidentification with an egoic "self" leading to blind or obscured self-centered actions.

Following these visions, it became imperative to strip the mind of inaccurate concepts and discover the core essence associated with my 3D (material) identity. This was not an easy task nor one for the faint-of-heart.

To answer your question more directly, the right use of mind (IMHO) is to free it for use as a "navigational" aid in the material realm. To free the mind, one must trust it and, for that, periodic purging of misinformation and misconstrued values is required much like a good pilot checks and calibrates instrumentation.

(1) If we are to "navigate" we must have a destination of some sort in mind, right? You agree?

There is no place to go and we have all the time in the universe to get there. We (in the royal sense of the word) are taking a joy-ride here in the material realm. That said, I believe that the combined effort of our physical entities is directed generally towards creating (or realizing) "Heaven on Earth." That is our purpose, but it is purely entertainment for Source via material form.

We can take a Zen-like approach to this and say that everything is already perfect; that there is no path to nirvana; that nirvana IS the path. I certainly get their point; however, Zen gets a little too clever sometimes. The perfection of our world is already there, but we (as a species of form) have been unable to realize it generally due to the obscurations within the human mind mentioned above.

(2) With that just above as a "given" in our discussion - if you concur - then what does that "destination" look and feel like?

If we say that the destination is where we are right now, we could say that it would look and feel the same objectively though we would interpret it differently – looking past our delusions to the perfection of everything. However, that is too simplistic and too “Zen”. I think we would see a new Earth that is not plagued by the direct outcome of our delusions such as war, poverty, global pollution and other causes of suffering. That is the point of our global awakening that seems to be underway.

(3) And what specific suggestions (your overview is good, but I'm wanting the nitty-gritty specifics) can you make?

Nitty-gritty? Primarily, we let go our deluded views (classic Buddhism). In the metaphorical visions I encountered, we remove the "junk," "mud," and "dust" from our view. For me, the “nitty-gritty” involved isolating myself from everything that reinforced my self-constructed identity (friends, family, career, etc.). It was classic renunciation and entry into the “Dark Night of the Soul” though I didn’t understand it as such at the time. I allowed everything to fall away passively (though not without angst) - trusting that whatever would be left would be fundamental. I survived alone, in the dirt, on a mountain – it was “nitty-gritty.”

I don’t know that it’s necessary for everyone to go through that, but it was for me. I had a very strong sense of self that was difficult to break.

It’s important to note that I am now writing several years after the visions described in this article. I would not have been able to explain things in these terms then. However, the visions were the provocation for realizing the necessity for the journey to the brink of oblivion (see for example, “Kiss the Void”).

You close the first question about how or where to navigate by discussing the obscuration of the mind. Prior to that you say of course everything is perfect, which it is. Neither of those give me directions as to how to get out of the obscuration of mind. That's what I'm really asking.

The visions did not address the basis or the cause of the obscurations - they were simply presented visually. So, even the term is something that I added later after much thought and study of (primarily Buddhist) teachings. There was simply the sense that humans live in general ignorance due to a clouded view of their environment. Later, I understood the obscurations to be due primarily to faulty concepts developed as both direct and indirect results of three aspects of the human condition: 1) limited input - our senses don't see everything, hear everything, feel everything, etc., 2) faulty interpretation of the limited available data and 3) emotional distortion of the data. Humans tend to rely on a mind-generated reality created by simplified (conceptual) packets of experience or expectation rather than immediate direct experience. We then tend to distort these packets of error-prone information (concepts derived from memories, teachings, etc.) further by subjecting them to our emotions of fear, greed, anger, etc.

The obscurations are removed by examining our belief systems carefully. In doing so, one finds that our biggest obstacle is the systematic beliefs about our “self.” I’m not one who believes the “self” is non-existent, but it is undoubtedly the most distorted of our views. These beliefs are so engrained that I found it necessary to isolate from everything that contributed to the belief system – let all those beliefs crumble and notice what is left. The “view” is much clearer after doing so.

Then, we examine our emotions and find that they are tightly based upon this distorted view of our “self.” These are again very difficult to let go even with an intellectual understanding of the distorted “self.” It requires a systematic rewiring of nervous system.

Your points regarding “living from the heart” are again metaphorical. What is generally being expressed with such comments is that we get out of our interpreted reality and assume love, rather than intellect, as our fundamental state of being. Again, to use the analogy of a pilot, we stop relying so much on our instrumentation, we take off the hood and look outside to experience and assess our environment directly. That is the basis of “Buddha Nature” – direct experience as opposed to mind-interpreted reality. One cannot help but experience love when one witnesses the splendor of fundamental reality.

However, while I agree that love is the ultimate human expression and experience, it is not enough, IMHO. Lots of stupid things occur in the human drama when love is not tempered with intelligence. The mind is a great asset of the human organism conveying enormous advantage over other terrestrial organisms – it simply requires constant calibration.

Thank you for the thoughtful reply. I have a question about two parts of what you wrote. First:

{The obscurations are removed by examining our belief systems carefully. In doing so, one finds that our biggest obstacle is the systematic beliefs about our “self.” I’m not one who believes the “self” is non-existent, but it is undoubtedly the most distorted of our views.}

Is it possible that NO BELIEFS the mind has are true? And if so, where does that leave us? Given our agreement on that there is One Source (God) that creates all, I wonder if it is possible to 'step out of the mind' in the 'Now Moment' and allow the intelligence of Source (God) to run things? And if so, is it possible to do so consistently?

And second:

[However, while I agree that love is the ultimate human expression and experience, it is not enough, IMHO. Lots of stupid things occur in the human drama when love is not tempered with intelligence. The mind is a great asset of the human organism conveying enormous advantage over other terrestrial organisms – it simply requires constant calibration.}

For me 'Love', 'God' and 'Intelligence' are interchangeable words for the same thing. Love that is not intelligent is not Love, IMHO. Of course Love is a "loaded word" that means different things to different people, but for me 'God IS Love' and 'Love IS God'. Therefore Love MUST be intelligent.

Thus it seems to me that "using the mind to anchor in Love" which is the experimental hypothesis I put forward earlier, is the same as saying "using the mind to anchor in God."

So my question is this: Can the mind access the vast intelligence of God by deciding to "let God run things"?? And if the answer is unknown, is that hypothesis, in your personal opinion, one that may be worth testing? Does that hypothesis warrant doing an 'experiment with the mind & emotions' in order to see what results?

The limitations of language become a problem is discussing these things. Is God love or does God love? Is love a noun or a verb? There is also the human emotion called love. So, one must define the terminology and use it consistently. I was using it in a human sense above. If you want to say that God IS love, then all we do is adjust our use of the word. The “two truths doctrine” recognizes the practical consensual aspect of the mundane dualistic view as well as the ultimate reality where everything is universally connected and inseparable. I find jumping back and forth tiresome; I prefer consensual language as that is the bulk of human experience. If you want to transcend human experience, then let’s talk in that language.

You ask, “Is it possible that NO BELIEFS the mind has are true?” This question seems to attempt to speak in terms of the absolute, where I might answer, “Yes.” Because true and false are merely different aspects of one reality. However, that isn’t very useful for our discussion. So, “No.” My mind knows that I am sitting now in San Anselmo, CA and knows that I am not sitting at the North Pole, at least not in any practical sense. My mind makes constant assessments about what is true in my consensual reality and what Is false. The visions we’re discussing were clearly indicating dualistic reality whereby the mind creates distorted views of things. However, nothing held in the mind is ultimate reality; it is all facsimile.

Next you ask, “Can the mind access the vast intelligence of God by deciding to ‘let God run things’?” Again, this can be approached in different ways. If we accept that we are fundamentally God (or an expression of God), then God is already running things no matter what we do. However, your question implies that we have a choice in this. Even assuming the most dualistic circumstances, we have very little choice in our lives. We presume to be able to choose what we have for dinner or where we will go for a vacation – though even there, our choices are limited by other things that may be out of our control (available money, subliminal advertising, our condition of health). We have no choice over most of what shows up for us; we can’t control the weather, we can’t control male pattern baldness, we can’t control which antibodies will be produced to fight an infection we are not even aware of, or whether the Sun will supernova and kill us all. So, for your question to have any meaning, you would need to first define the God we will “let” run the show. You would need to define the hypothesis and state the parameters and variables of the experiment. You will then need to decide how you will measure the results of the test which will presumably include proper controls.

I await what I assume will be an interesting reply with appropriate anticipation.

Ahhh... I do not have the scientific background and training that you have, which you bring to bear so easily in our conversations. So I appreciate this from you - you said:

{If you want to transcend human experience, then let’s talk in that language.}

Yes, my interest is in transcending human experience. And I agree that we do appear to experience dualistic reality. You are NOT at the North Pole, and neither am I - LOL!!

Nonetheless, I am interested in transcending the normal human experience, which seems to add up to a great deal of both pleasure and pain.

To me it seems we do have a choice in our mental decisions. So that is the context in which I propose the experiment to "put God in charge".

I must however leave it to you, who are far more capable than me in this regard, to handle the several points you raised. You said we would: {need to first define the God we will “let” run the show.}

God is beyond my ability to define. You also said we would: {need to define the hypothesis and state the parameters and variables of the experiment.}

Again I must ask for your input for that, but I will add that if you really are willing to experiment with transcending normal human experience, I'm game.

Just one thing - please "dumb it down" some for me. I seek solutions I can implement. The multitude of variables you touch on engage my mind, but they do not lead to a solution that I can implement. Suggestions??

OK - let's keep it simple. You want to allow God to run things - surrender to God, in parochial terms. We still need to define what we mean by this because here we tread into religious belief systems and we want to transcend all belief systems since they tend to be conceptual and therefore corruptible.

I believe that what you aim to transcend is egoic identification as opposed to transcending duality altogether. True nonduality is primordial – I don’t think that’s what you want. Instead, I think you want to identify as an expression of God (Atman, Source, Tao, etc.) à la Ramana Maharshi, et al. Correct? This is the “enlightened” view and I don’t see any problem with it. But then (the point of my prior comment), God is already running things because you ARE that (ta tvam asi) and everything you do, every decision you make is God acting in human form. To achieve this in a practical sense, one obviously cannot be confined to a deluded mind discussed above or an egoic (false) sense of self. Intellectually, I am quite sure we agree on all of this, so far.

However, this all falls apart completely if all we have is an intellectually enlightened view!

Here’s the BIG “secret:” in order to identify as God, one must truly FIND God. This again sounds like religious rhetoric, but the more I get into these things, the more I realize the Truth that underlies the rhetoric. This is what I believe you have referred to as “Heart;” it is beyond mind. The mind will masquerade as that God you seek. It is very important that one bypasses the egoic “God” to find the True God (damn; sounding religious, again). This is why it was so important for me to destroy my conceptual self (ego); it overpowers the very subtle Self (the God within).

The problem with any religion is that it tends to leave us short of where we want to be. Religions typically leave us with an imaginary anthropomorphic God that really can’t do much for us because the God that is realized is only an extension of our mind which has not been truly transcended.

To “put God in charge” as you say, we find that subtle knowing awareness within (the noetic Self), tune into it, and trust it. It takes attention and practice, in my experience. It’s like tuning into the universal common denominator – that’s basically what God is.

Thanks for going down this road with me. It’s been a very good discussion.

There are many forms of consciousness, but there is only One consciousness that permeates everything. That, of course, is the One to find and identify with (in Marharshi's terms). That is why this can be very difficult to teach. It’s like pointing to the night sky and saying, “It’s that star.” One can never know from following the teacher’s finger which star is being pointed to. Again, this is why I felt the need to deconstruct, throw away everything I could to narrow things to that most fundamental aspect of my Self. Meditation does much the same though it is much slower, and one can go into complete absorption and miss it that way or become distracted by the bliss. I didn’t have a teacher, so I did both: meditate and destroy my self. ☹ That’s a hard way to go, though ultimately worth the trouble.

Remarkably, it still isn’t easy to locate though it is sitting in plain sight. It’s because what you look for is very, very subtle and the mind is very powerful. The mind throws up many obstacles. If you read about Siddhārtha Gautama’s awakening, whether we consider it in a literal or in an allegorical sense, all sorts of things showed up to derail him to prevent him from becoming the Buddha. This is very important to understand.

It’s the “Hero’s Journey;” one must walk the final path alone. The teachings make perfect sense. However, be careful that knowledge gained from them doesn’t become a basis for the mind to project an elaborate lie. You are the Buddha. Trust it and find the place where Buddha resides.

Your response is insightful and clearly expresses what you are experiencing.

You're closing point to me is to "Trust It" - trust that I am the Buddha - and that stands out as powerful and beautiful advice.

Ramana Maharshi says over and over again in talks with people recorded during the 1930s that doubt is the single largest obstacle to realization.

He says to leave off the doubts and do just as you recommended. Trust that you are the Self, the Buddha, because it is obviously true. And from that place of deep trust within follow the inner guidance, whatever it may be. Thank you.

Yes. Trust it; trust that you are the Buddha. I suppose that might be called “faith.” The further I go with this, the more I find myself using common religious terminology. I find that so interesting and amusing. My mind has rejected all these terms since childhood. I suppose this re-evaluation part of the journey has been a discovery of the ways the mind blocks our recognition of the truth we seek. So very revealing … Ramana Marharshi was correct when he warned against doubt. Yet, there are all the subtleties that, for me, prevented blind acceptance without this very close examination.

What we seek is not mental; it is silent and visceral. It extends to infinity. We can tune it in like a station on an old analogue radio. Each time we tune into it, the signal is stronger and easier to maintain. It carries signals that display in the conscious mind and the subconscious body.

Because it displays in the mind, it’s important to distinguish from those thoughts that originate in the mind. We must ask, “Is this ‘me’ or ‘I’?” “Is it displaying in the mind or did it originate there?” There is an innate noesis that will respond. The difference is qualitative; like knowing art when one sees it. We must be vigilant to not accept a mind-generated facsimile. There is no other test I know of. However, the knowing can be trusted if we are honest and true to our Self.

My intention is to respond truthfully, and yet at the same time to acknowledge your perspective as I understand it, because there is truth in that as well.

The answer is that my words & responses seem to simply flow through me.

I am aware that there is a "Patrick" with a past and a future, a driver's license and all that, yet when I go looking for him I really cannot find him.

Regardless, to say that my words flow from the Buddha within must appear to be the height of hubris.

The best report that I can give you is that I am aware that I am consciousness - I am awareness - and that I am nothing beyond that.

What I sent last night was with the help of enhancement. (Green medicine.) However the same consciousness seems to appear now, in the mid-afternoon, and it exists without medicine.

Perhaps more to the point is that "Buddha Nature", "Christ Consciousness", "the Self", and even God, are all mental concepts.

My best guess is that beyond all of those concepts, which really are different words for the same thing, there is an Awakened Consciousness that is blissful. That sweet bliss is my rather consistent life experience.

IT seems to have It's own agenda - and that agenda seems to be the expression and development of Love in this world.

I have apparently turned out to be a reasonable conduit for IT. The body-mind entity "Patrick" may be awake in that sense. Regardless, "Patrick" still has his share of challenges in the world, however the Conscious Awareness that I am is rarely impacted by them.