Days In Monsterville

Nov14 2011

My friend Shemp died today, sitting on the veterinarian’s table. Mom held him while he fell asleep, the final kindness.

I’m sorry, Shemp. I’m so sorry. And I’ve used up all my words, a 15-year stream of curses, exclamations, inanities you only babble to cats, prayers, confessions, well wishes, and random musings — thousands of words. Not enough.

Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.