God alone is Sovereign

1 Chronicles 29:11

Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O LORD, and you are exalted as head above all.

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Monday, November 12, 2012

3 Days Post-Op

Blog Update for Monday

Yesterday evening was a tough night for us and the PCICU. We had two babies lose their battle with heart defects. A stark reminder these babies are very sick and that we live in a very broken world caused by our sin. Sometimes the Lord's providence is deep, dark and very painful. But, we take heart in knowing God is good and His purposes, although sometimes very hard to understand, are working all things to glorify His name and for the ultimate good of His children. We are learning what it means to be "as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing" (2Cor.6:10) in a very tough way. Our prayers go out for these families who are having to deal with the sorrow of losing their children.

They shut down the PCICU last night at 11pm and did not re-open until early this morning around 5am. We were forced to leave, which is always vey tough. Having to leave however did allow both Tina and I sometime to catch up on our sleep. This was much needed. A blessing wrapped in grief.

Anna had an ok night from what we can gather from her nurse. She was in and out most of the night and needed only once to have some versed. She is still having a tough time staying calm.

I arrived at the hospital around 6:45am and found Anna sleeping. Her sleep was accompanied with slight soft moans that would come about every 3 to 5 minutes. It was very difficult to listen to but the Lord sustained me. Her nose O2 tubing had worked itself loose and really was not giving her much assistance. Her O2 sats were staying pretty stable trending in the mid 80's.

She woke up around 8am in a pretty good mood. She indicated she was hungry so I tried to flag her nurse down. Her nurse was tending to another patient, so a different nurse who was working the desk area came over. The nurse, in an attempt to help Anna, tried to get the O2 nose tube back on her nose. Not a good idea. This really upset Anna and she got so worked I thought we were going to have to drug her again. Now I'm not a very good singer, but my soft rendition of Jesus Loves Me seemed to calm her down and she dozed back off to sleep again. This was mercy, for Anna really more than me. Like I said, I really am a poor, poor singer.

She woke up during the doctors making their rounds, and I was able to sing her back to sleep again. Basically her doctors were pleased with her progress for the most part. They said she was doing pretty well, and her fluid drainage was slightly decreased, but they were concerned she was having to be sedated to stay calm. They decided she should stay in the PCICU for at least another day. I was disappointed, but am trusting this is the Lord's doing.

The next time she woke up we (the head nurse and I) could not not get her to calm down. She was having none of her daddy's singing this go around. She wanted to be picked up and held and she wanted mommy, who was on her way. Her heart rate went way up and her O2 sat went way down. The head nurse said lets get her calm and she was given a dose of verse and some morphine. That did the trick. She was asleep in less than 5 minutes.

She slept for about 15 mins and then woke up and was ready to eat. We kicked in a good old Boz DVD and enjoyed some strawberries bananas,, toast, yogurt and ice chips. We even had a few laughs at Boz and she seemed sort of happy. The verse no doubt. But it made me feel better.

Tina arrived before she finished eating and was greatly welcomed. By both Anna and me. This was around 10:15. Tina was able to hold Anna for about 5 minutes. Like we suspected it caused her a great deal of pain. But, in the pain came some good as it helped her release some fluid drainage which we are told is a good thing.

She received some morphine and was put back into bed. After a short time she dozed off again. Upon awaking she started crying and asking to go home. She said she was sacred, which breaks our hearts (no pun intended).

Tina has been sitting with Anna for the last few hours. She has been able to keep her from getting extremely upset however, they locked the unit down as they were getting a patient settled in from surgery which means Tina was asked to leave the unit for a while. Anna Grace was then inconsolable and again had to be given versed.

2 comments:

Oh, Brian and Tina,Our hearts ache for you and AG!!! We know exactly what you are going through. We know how hard it is to see your precious child hurting and scared and not be able to make it better. It rips your heart out!!! We continue to pray for comfort, effective pain management, rest, and the chest tube drainage to decrease. Things will be so much better when you can get out of the PCICU!Heart hugs,Bill, Pam, Rebecca, and Zach Owens

I was reading through some Psalms tonight, and 2 verses from Psalm 22 jumped out at me. vs. 19 and 24 "But you, O LORD, be not far off, O my Strength, come quickly to help me.....[Revere him, all you desendants of Israel!] For he has not despised or disdained the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help."I am, like so many others, hurting just reading about AG's pain, your pain, and the unimaginable pain of the families whose babies have passed. I am so glad that Our God has not hidden his face! He is PRESENT in the pain. I am praying for all the specific requests, and especially for His PRESENCE to be tangibly manifest in the PCICU. His Prensence, His PEACE is REAL. May you feel it and be assured of it's power with every fiber of your being. In HIM-Jenn