In every old capitalist college football system – NCAA, FBS, BCS, or CFP – is very common for team to be perfect 7-0 by this time of season. Why is this? Is because of nonsenseconference system! Is because of incentive to pack schedule full with cupcake games, like young piglet stuffing for later slaughter! Is because of artificial popularity poll made by undeserving committee, a creation of hungry-for-advertising-revenue American television corporation, who is then saying every game is with very best teams! Bred sivoy kobyly!

Uggggh. Boooooored! Georgy is all like, TOTALLY obsessed with teaching us about Soviet military history, and I’m just like, barely awake… Leningrad, Novgorod, Stalingrad, Ostrogozhsk–Rossosh… BLUURRRGGG. Pass the kvass! Know what I’m sayin’? Anyway, I’m learning a lot, I guess. Oh, and what else was there… maybe just that… HARVARD’S STILL NUMBER ONE TOP POWER RANKING ON TIER 2, baby! Kyle, did you see that? I find that very interesting. I find that to be exceptional, don’t you think? The Russians love them some CRIMSON, amirite? Oh, but SIGGGH. It’s so lonely on the top. Perhaps the 1% know the pain of which I speak? Yeah, Georgy’s all like, fired up about the Battle of Kharkov or whatever, and I’m just like “DUDE. You don’t GET IT.” You know? Because I’m like, FREAKING OUT right now after Yale beat UMass this week. 36 to 34. And I know Yale’s like, still only 2-5 and totally in last place in the Tier 2, District 1 North division, and it’s not like it’s gonna be easy to get past Southern Miss and, YEAH, FINE – Harvard in the last game of the season. Aw, man – wouldn’t it be SWEET if Yale totally won out and Harvard lost the rest of their games, and it came down to the final game of the year – Harvard’s 7 and 4 and Yale’s 6 and 5 – and Yale totally beats Harvard’s ass and WINS THE DIVISION based on head-to-head tiebreaker? Dude! You would NOT be able to deny – that would be a total SIGN FROM GOD about what I’m supposed to do to Bobby.

When top college football team is suffering even one loss in antiquated system of NCAA, fans is weeping like drunken American debyutantka in nightclub bathroom, cursing before-favorite coach and young players. Football critics is saying is impossible for this team to now win “invitation” to miniature CFP playoff for make championship game.

Reaction is ridiculous! Is demonstration of weakness! Did Soviet Union quit war following disaster in First Battle of Kiev? NYET! Did fall of Kharkov result in Soviet surrender? NYET! One or two losing battles is not meaning war is finish!

PAIN NOW FOR LATER GLORY, IS POSSIBLE

Before Week Seven of Commie Football season, is only eight remaining unbeaten teams total, on both Tier 1 and Tier 2 levels. Now, is even less! Washington Huskies (6-1) is losing first game of season by 31-29 score to back-from-dead Oregon Ducks (2-5). Also in District 8, California Golden Bears (6-1) is falling in defeat for first time by score 43-33 to Cougars of Washington State (4-3). Only one team is remaining unbeaten on Tier 1 level – but how long can Stanford Cardinal (7-0), who is enjoying easy 31-17 victory over Hawaii in Week Seven, remain without blemish, like rare Isaak Brodsky painting?

On Tier 2 level, is more damage for unbeaten teams! James Madison, Georgia Southern, and Sam Houston State is all suffering first loss of season in Week Seven.

Is season now over for Huskies and Cal? Should JMU, Georgia Southern, and Sam Houston abandon schedule and quit season? Is championship dream over for any team with only one loss?

NYET! Is only one battle! Full Commie Football season is long war, and is yet many opportunity for enough victory to make 16-team playoff and possible championship! Is fact – only teams with six or seven losses is already ineligible for playoff, but this is now include only 13 of 96 teams on Tier 1 level!

But da, single loss in playoff is resulting in immediate death.

Here is summary of results for exciting Week 7 games in Commie Football:

District 1: Temple Owls (5-2) is defeating Syracuse 24-17, moving back into tie for North division lead with Rutgers, who is losing 40-22 in medieval battle between Scarlet Knights and Black Knights of Army (3-4); Pitt Panthers (2-5) is tasting delicious nectar of 27-25 victory vs. nemesis Nittany Lions (4-3); WVU (4-3) is taking advantage with 29-22 victory vs. Navy Midshipmen to stay in South division playoff race.

District 3: Buckeyes (5-2, #21 rank) is treating arch rival Michigan Wolverines (5-2, #13) to 30-16 beatdown; Michigan State (5-2, #17) is exploding all over Ohio Bobcats 67-17 to create 3-way tie with UM and OSU for North division lead; Memphis Tigers (5-2, #18) is surging with power to 54-29 victory vs. Kentucky Wildcats, to take lead in South.

District 5: Fighting Irish (6-1, #3 rank) is making quiet comeback in Top Power rankings, fighting off Northwestern (5-2, #15) in key 31-29 victory; Iowa Hawkeyes (6-1, #4) is defeating Kansas State (5-2) 25-14 in equal critical South division game; Mizzou (6-1, #5) is sharing lead of South division following 24-18 victory vs. Cyclones of Iowa State

District 6: Oklahoma State (6-1) is gushing like Baku oil well up to #2 Top Power rank after 62-26 domination victory of Tulsa Golden Hurricane; Meanwhile, Oklahoma Sooners (6-1, #6) 55-40 win vs. Razorbacks of Arkansas is moving OU into 3-way tie for North division lead; Horned Frogs of TCU (6-1, #7) is third team in tie after easy 43-21 win vs. SMU; In South division, Houston Cougars (5-2, #25) is surprise beating Baylor Bears 43-27 in upset victory, is now tie for South lead with Texas A&M (5-2) who is embarrassing losing by score 21-19 to little Texas State Bobcats!

District 7: Defending Tier 2 championColorado State Rams (4-3) is surprising Boise State (5-2, #14 rank) in 26-24 upset victory; Air Force Falcons (4-3) is remaining in hunt for South division title with 37-19 victory vs. ASU Sun Devils; Arizona Wildcats (4-3) is beating UTEP 38-29 to maintain tie for South division lead.

Harvard Crimson (7-0, #1 rank) is continue success with 39-18 victory vs. Brown to maintain #1 Top Power rank; In best game of week, featuring two unbeaten teams, McNeese State Cowboys (7-0, #2) is defeating Sam Houston State 29-25 to seize control of District 7 playoff race; Toledo Rockets (6-1, #3) is continue to fly high in 36-29 over Chippewas of Central Michigan; Southern Miss (6-1, #4) is efficient defeating of Samford by score 50-23; 2014 runner-upWestern Kentucky Hilltoppers (6-1, #5) is climbing again near top of hill after 34-28 over Georgia State.