I'm frank. I think.

Life is pretty nuts.
If you just consider what’s happening, what’s going on here… this shit is WILD.
I think that’s what most excites and frustrates me about being alive – the possibilities are endless and yet we engage in systemized dogshit whirlpools of offensive stupidity.

Grand Prismatic Spring, Yellowstone. Shot on Kodak Portra 400.

Like, it’s offensive how stupid we are. But we’re also awesome. Take stock of what you are.
You are a collection of trillions of really tiny things called cells (made up of a shitload of laughably tinier things) which, individually, are nothing, but thanks to a little something called “Dee Ennay,” assume all kinds of weird functions to create a network of chemicals that can fart and do karaoke.

High accuracy and detail of the scientific description isn’t even necessary to elucidate the awesomeness – you’re a pile of chemicals and compounds that has, harvests, and uses energy. On top of that, somehow you are aware of this and can direct your matter pile to do specific things you want to do. What does it mean to want? Who the fuck knows. Because how can a stack of meat want something? Who the fuck knows.

You know what else is cool?
There are countless other types of self-propelled matter piles out there doing whatever they want. Some of them breathe water. Others make food out of sunlight (are you fucking kidding me??). Some of them work at Home Depot. There are even some organisms that live inside other meat bags and eat them or eat things trying to eat them.

Instead of “life,” we should call it “Fellastriodamus,” because this shit is mind-blowing.
(That was a joke wherein I combined fellatio and Nostradamus because Nostradamus was probably smart and so represents mind, and fellatio is like a blowjob. Call me later, I’ll explain it further.)

The magnitude of the mind-blowingness of life and Earth and the universe is so immense that sometimes, I literally can’t even. Like I can’t. I just can’t.
Betch.

I can’t understand many things about human individuals and our various organizations:
Why do we ever feel certain of anything?
Why do we suppose complete understanding is even possible?
Why do people think they’re important?
Why do people care about most things?
What is love? (Baby, don’t hurt me)

I’m probably not going to address each one of these, because you should do your own mindquests on that front. And because effort.

Instead, I’ll jump right into the god debate, because I think this realm of intellectual sparring very neatly reveals the irrationality and hubris of human judgement. And then I’ll come out the back end with some more ooh-ing and ah-ing that might provide fuel for those other fires of wonderment.
Here goes:

Is there a god? I don’t know.
Do you know? Of course you don’t.
Is there not a god? I don’t know, and neither do you.
Debate over.

Lol, jk.
Not really, but I’ll go a bit deeper than that.

I’m going to specifically target the atheist side of this debate, if only because we already understand the irrationality of the super-theistic:
Yea, you read a book written thousands of years ago, across a span of hundreds of years, by a bunch of random dudes who had questionable knowledge of supposedly historical events, and you believe everything in that book because someone promised you would burn eternally if you didn’t.

Really proud of you.
Don’t have to go into that one.

My issue with the atheist position on this debate is that it responds to the most irrational aspects of the theist argument. Is there likely to be a bearded, human-like dude sitting on a cloud, pulling the puppet strings of this world, giving some people great fortune and others misery?
Dear lord, no.
Does that mean it’s unlikely there is a god?
Abso-fucking-lutely not.

(To be super, duper clear, when I say “atheist” I’m referencing a generality that underlies almost all atheist arguments I’ve ever witnessed. I can’t reference every atheist or sect of atheism, so just shut up.)

Several different peoples have created some really kind of boring and stupid definitions of god. Instead of admitting this and providing an argument against a better definition of god (like maybe any sort of universal consciousness or design that, by nature, we can’t fully define), atheists demand that you can’t change the definition of god. This reminds me of the scene in Semi-Prowhen Coffee Black scores the first ever alley-oop, and Father Pat calls it a foul and a travel. If you take the time to really think about what the term “god” means – an omniscient, omnipotent entity responsible for the existence of the universe – I find it a bit ludicrous that we would then debate its existence by weighing the probability that a white man in robes is controlling our fates. And, to steal a favorite atheist line, to deny the existence of god based on such “children’s stories” is itself pretty childish. There are better conceptions of “god,” and therefore better arguments to be had.

Now, to bring this all to a bit of a head: can we determine whether an omniscient, omnipotent force exists? No.
Before you get too excited about that, this lack of evidence can’t be used to support either side.
You could say in response, “The lack of proof means god is unlikely to exist,” or,
“Yea, but there’s no proof god doesn’t exist.”
The issue here is each side is placing the burden of proof on the other. Additionally, each side claims the right to assign the burden of proof. In fact, it’s arbitrary. What I’m saying here is agnostics, like atheists and theists, are also jumping off from a subjective point of reference (To their credit though, I think they’re a lot closer to the point than most).

So, maybe the truly “adult,” scientific thing to do in this case is to consider both the possibilities (I want to say there is a third possibility, but that thought made my brain start bleeding). There may be a god, there may not. We won’t know for sure until either is proven, which might never happen. And because of that, every one of us has the right to believe there is or is not a god. But since it is a belief either way, any judgement of others for having the opposing belief amounts to petty crybaby bullshit.

Essentially, my point is if you zoom out and analyze the immensity of what is being debated, the debate becomes meaningless. God either does or does not exist, and our arguing a certain viewpoint won’t change that, because we are faaaaaar below that theoretical plane of existence. Learn to deal with the discomfort of not knowing.

I am personally inclined to say I believe in god.
When I say “believe” here, it’s more like I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a god, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there wasn’t. I’d just be less surprised if there was.
I’ve also had several quasi-mystical experiences that are difficult to explain away as coincidence or delusion. I don’t want to describe them here because that seems like an ego trap – “I’m so in tune with god and the universe. Don’t worry, I’m sure you are too, you just haven’t seen the light.” – but I had them and they were neat.

Besides my own such experiences, the gush of wonder and awe I discussed before – the amazement I feel when I consider the makings of reality – also inclines me toward the idea of a universal intelligence. And it’s science itself that strengthens this inclination, because it uncovers how such a massively complex system, with infinitely minuscule margins of probability of even being, works. But it also can’t address the origins.
So yes, everything behaves according to certain physics, and life could have been sparked and evolved due to X, Y, Z… but how did those certain physics come to be, and why don’t they change? Even though on the universal timeline life is a cosmic blip, isn’t it remarkable that life feels like an eternity, and thus far in this eternity, gravity still gravitates and the Sun still appears at predictable times and locations on the horizon every morning?
Isn’t is remarkable that a pile of different atoms can form arms, legs, and nostrils, and go skydiving and write books and invent Squatty Potties?

Again, yes, these are just the rules being carried out, and science uncovered these rules, but why in fuck are these the rules, why do the rules stay the same, and why are there rules at all?

I don’t fucking know, but I’m impressed.

The god I envision is the rules; god is physics. God is why everything works the way it does, and also the energy that forms the quarks, gluons, atoms, cells, stars, planets, clouds, plants, animals, and oceans. God is also the various forms of consciousness, which makes our human experience possible, and is also totally unquantifiable.
Think about that for a second:
Consciousness is unquantifiable. The thing that makes us the apex of life (in our own eyes), that allows us to examine, analyze, discuss, and improve our circumstances (to do science), is immeasurable. We can’t even guarantee that objective reality is possible because we all might experience things in completely different ways. What if what I see as red – the visual phenomenon itself – is what you call “blue,” and vice versa? There is no way to prove that isn’t the case. If I consistently see red where others see blue, and see blue where others see red, and have thus learned to label red as “blue” and blue as “red,” I am irreparably and unknowingly living a starkly different reality than everyone else.
AHHH!

I don’t even know what the point of that was. I’m hitting the rabbit holes at light speed right now.

I guess the bottom line is that certainty is an illusion.
How can I be certain of that? Fuck you, is how.

And so from here, let’s change gears and talk about politics or sports. Or we can gossip about people. We should also decide if it’s ok for people to be gay or wear dresses if they were born with penises. BUT WAIT! We must also be volcanically passionate about these things and form steadfast opinions and hate each other if we disagree! These are the rules and we must obey them!

You see the stupidity?
Those are not the rules.
That shit doesn’t matter.
You are not required to participate.

Whatever you believe about anything, please just remember that you don’t know. Try to wrap your head around the existence of everything any time you’re inclined to judge anyone or argue about something. I’ll do the same.

That’s it.
This is going nowhere and everywhere, so I’ll just stop. My brain is tired.

Have a good weekend.

P.S. The comments sections here on WordPress or on my Facebook are not open to you giving reasons for or against the existence of god. You missed the point if you’re inclined to such actions after reading this. Start over.

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