Mullet and 15 Others Get Jail Time For Haircuts

Sporting a mullet post-1994 should be a crime, but apparently forcibly getting a haircut from a guy named “Mullet” can be a federal case.

Samuel Mullet and members of his family decided to breakaway from the rest of their Amish community when they felt the group was straying from core beliefs. Did someone miss out on the afternoon butter churning section? (I can make jokes, its not like they’re ever going to see this).

You can watch the video below if you’re too lazy to read. But apparently Mullet and some of his followers started terrorizing those in the group they left behind.

Showing that he is all business (versus business in the front, party in the back), Mullet would orchestrate attacks against his former group. Including beatings and stealing wives. Check out Mullet’s photo here. What lady doesn’t want to be stolen by him?

However it was Mullet’s haircuts that got him in to trouble. He would forcibly cut the beards of rival Amish men. He even cut the hair of elderly Amish women (almost down to the scalp according to some reports).

Those attacks was part of a reign of terror Mullet inflicted on his community. It was also enough to charge him with “hate crimes”. So he and 15 of his followers were put on trial.

Usually when you hear “mullet”, “crime”, and “trial” in the same sentence, a case of Pabst Blue Ribbon and the phrase “woman c’mere” are involved.

Mullet and his co-horts were found guilty. Each defendant is facing a sentence of 10 years in prison.

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