Oh my God, this is so not fair!! You gave me ALL the Jily feels I didn't even know I had!!! :S Now I want to jump around imagining them together in Hogsmeade and I', GRINNING right now and my roommate thinks I'm crazy. Huh.

Jokes apart, but I DID love this so much. :D James and Lily are one of my most favorite ships from Harry Potter and only because I love them like this I don't ship Snape/Lily.

You did such a great job in describing every moment, practically every moment from both of their PoV that it feels real to me. Perhaps that's because Lily's point of view seemed completely hers and James's was no ones but his. The characterization was lovely and I loved the way you highlighted the similarity between their feelings but the differeneces in the ways they think about them.

I also liked that you didn't end this one-shot with their first kiss. That would have been quite typical. But this ending is just too cute for me to handle. And I love it.

Love it! haha!
I really liked how you switched points of view, you really tied them together well, one ending and then the other would pick up with basically the same thought. It's like there's on the same brain wave without even knowing it, they both feel anger towards each other for basically the same thing.

I really like the descriptions and stuff you have in here, they really put an image in your mind as to what the characters look like. You did very well with your descriptive focus on the characters, which was obviously intentional and well executed.

Also with the characters, their tones and attitudes are so believable. I can definitely see this as being how the real James and Lily felt. However, conveyed through this the one thing I might touch on is incorporating something a little past physical attraction. You've touched gently on him being oblivious or dumb and her being smart, but is it a contributing factor to their attraction?

Here and there I think a little more description of the setting would be nice, but what you have here is solid and if you don't feel comfortable adding more detail to the setting than I wouldn't push too hard for it.

Like I said, this is really good, and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it! I think you should definitely try something like this again. :)

Author's Response: Thank you! haha!
I'm glad you picked up on the POV thing - not many people did, so I was a bit worried that no one would figure it out :/ That was exactly what I was going for with the "same brain wave" thing, so good job on that!

Thank you :D I was kind of going for them "only having eyes for each other," so obviously there's going to be a lot of focus on just the two of them. I'm glad you found the description to be well executed.

Ahaha, well this is my first Lily/James so I'm happy to know that I got them right. I was worried that I wouldn't be able to write them correctly.

To be honest, I wrote this a very long time ago and I haven't read it since I posted it, so I can't speak much to your points :/ I didn't really edit this before I put it up even though I feel I've gotten a lot better at writing since I wrote this. But I'm sure that your points are very valid since you've just read it. If I ever /do/ go back and edit this I will definitely make sure to work on the things you've mentioned here, so thank you so much for pointing them out. And I'll keep these thoughts in mind for any of my future writing endeavors.

Thank yoouu for such a lovely and helpful review! I'm glad you enjoyed it, and if I ever come up with some more plot bunnies I'll make sure to try them out. Thanks again ♥

This is just so so so sweet. I love your theme of planets and stars--its so otherworldly, and James and Lily's love has always seemed to me to be very out of this world. And stars are just so beautiful. I also think its fantastic the way that you use the end of one POV to begin the next. Its so amazing how absolutely perfect for each other they are. I love it. This one shot is just so darn beautiful. I love James and Lily, and you capture them astoundingly here. Great job!

Author's Response: Aw, thank yoouu ♥ I didn't actually think about the "otherworldly" idea with the stars/planets thing, I just thought it was kind of romantic :P But sure, that could work too! Ahh, thank you for picking up on how I worked the POV changes together. I wasn't sure if anyone would get that - how their chain of thoughts fit so perfectly together. This is my first Lily/James so I'm glad I didn't screw up too badly. Thank you for such a lovely review! I'm glad you liked it so much :D

I quite enjoyed this. I love the back and forth between their perspectives, and the way they keep dancing about one another, completely oblivious that their nuts for each other. Reminds me of another couple I know, hmmm.

The way they view each other is so cute and so teenagery (I think that's a word). And I love that bit with the Peter reference. he does seem that thick, but if Harry is anything to go by then James must have been thicker than concrete. I would love to see her ask him out with a Quaffle. Would be hilarious to see.

And i love the way they look at one another,d rinking in the others details, their tiny imperfections and savouring them, but are still both clueless. it's great.

I think you'v written them both so well, the clueless pining, the bitter resenetment which is really misplaced love, the way they always rub each other the wrong way in an attempt to get the other to notice them. So cute and so funny.

And you draw the world around them in such a beautiful way too, and their almost complete obliviousness to it in their focusing on one another. But most of all I love that Lily is the one who asks, albeit in a very roundabout way but still, flips the idea on it's head as it's always James the courageous Gryffindor who makes the move. So much better this way.

TyrannicFeenix

Author's Response: I'm glad :) It was a lot of fun to write the different perspectives. They're both very different and yet the same in how they're so oblivious, so that was neat to play around with.

Well, good, because that's what I was going for as a teenager myself :D "James must have been thicker than concrete" - haha, that's what I've always thought, judging by Harry. So hopefully that didn't seem /too/ out of place.

Thank you :)

Yay! This was my first attempt at a Lily/James, so I was really rather nervous about getting them written the right way. So thank you for relieving me a bit.

That obliviousness of the rest of the world is just something that I thought would happen when you can't keep your eyes off of someone else. Everything else just sort of fades into the background. And the thing with Lily asking - I thought that was a bit risky to put in because it's so different than what usually happens, but that's just how I pictured it. I'm glad you like it that way, too.