Healing The Past

I came to Holy Spirit to ask Him to show me if there is anything in my childhood or teen years that might have distorted His truth. If He could show me any bad experience that is still producing bad fruit in me.
I sensed Him say…

I AM HERE, LOOK AT ME. JUST LOOK AT ME. I SEE THROUGH YOU. I SEE TRUTH. AND I ALSO DETECT LIES. LIES STAND OUT BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT NORMAL. TRUTH IS NORMAL. TRUTH IS WHAT I PLACED IN YOU. AND LIES STAND OUT BECAUSE THEY DON’T BELONG THERE. THIS IS ME AND THIS IS WHAT I DO. I EXPOSE LIES. COME TO ME TO FIND OUT WHAT DOESN’T BELONG THERE. THE REST IS NORMAL, WHAT YOU WERE BORN WITH.

The thought that came to mind was HOPE and then HOPE DEFERRED. I then started sharing with the Lord memories of when I was a teenager. My Dad uprooted our family to go retire in a foreign country. It was his dream. But our family went through a real unfortunate situation where we lost everything in that country. Not only did the company go bankrupt where my dad invested all his money, but also we were robbed by a lawyer who forged my dad’s signature and took possession of our home and all our belongings in that country and we had to return home empty handed. I felt that experience marked me deeply and somehow I may have bought lies that have to do with my ability to move forward in life. That somehow my progress is forever hindered. Maybe the feeling that all hopes are always dashed.

Then I sensed the Lord say…
I CAN BLEACH OUT THE EXPERIENCE THAT STAINED YOUR FUTURE. IT IS JUST A STAIN. NOT A PERMANENT ONE. I CAN BLEACH IT OUT. IT WON’T BE SEEN ANYMORE. IT WON’T BE NOTICED ANYMORE. I MAKE IT ALL WELL. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. YOU HAD NO CHOICE. AND IT IS ALRIGHT BECAUSE I HAVE A CHOICE. AND MY CHOICE IS TO TAKE THIS STAIN OUT. I CAN DO THAT PERMANENTLY. THE STAIN ISN’T PERMANENT BUT MY BLEACHING IT OUT IS PERMANENT. I CAN DO THAT ALL ON MY OWN. YOU JUST RECEIVE. THAT’S ALL. YOU JUST RECEIVE. THERE IS NOTHING MORE YOU HAVE TO DO. I FORGIVE YOU FOR HOLDING ON TO THAT EXPERIENCE. IT IS A LIE. IT IS NOT YOUR TRUTH. I ERASE IT AND THE MEMORY OF IT. IT IS A LIE. I DELETE IT NOW. I BLEACH IT OUT NOW. IT IS GONE FOR GOOD. YOU RISE BECAUSE I SAY YOU DO. AND THIS PAST EXPERIENCE WILL BRING YOU DOWN NO LONGER. I SAY IT IS DONE. YOU BELIEVE IT? YOU RECEIVE IT?

Thank you for sharing. I use to have a problem with healing from my past and it actually took me awhile to get past it. I felt that God would never heal me or that I could never let it go because it was so horrific. But then I began to let go and just trust in God and move forward because without healing you can’t allow yourself to grow. I really enjoyed this post and could relate to it.

Awe!! Soooo good to hear Joyage! You know what helped me is pronouncing forgiveness outloud constantly for days or weeks until bad feelings dissappeared. E.g. Lord, I forgive _____. I let him/her go. I release them and dont charge them anymore with wrong doing. God I choose to forgive ______. (And did this litteraly daily!!! It works) .

About Me

Former Missionary together with my husband of 21 years and 2 daughters. We were based in Hawaii, Nicaragua, Costa Rica, South Africa and Jamaica the first 11 years of our marriage. Now serving the Lord in the market place.
Twitter: @sorayarosaria