That is an actual thing that happened today. No sensational headlines or tricks. Today, Doug Gottlieb had a train of thought the nuts and bolts of which went something like: "Hey, Tony Gonzalez finally won a playoff game. Wonder if it felt better to him than A.C. Green rubbing genitals with his wife for the first…

When you need a non-lethal defense system, don't settle for anything less than the non-lethal defense system that A.C. Green gives to the women in his life. For lethal defense, you should still talk to Delonte West. [YouTube]

Long before John Rocker offered him his thoughts on New York City transit, SI.com columnist Jeff Pearlman was a rosy-cheeked collegian who was more than happy to share his sexual habits with the world.