Mitch McConnell Tries to Be Cool By Doing “Harlem Shake” Thing Three Months Late

Oh my God, so embarrassing: Mitch McConnell (voted “Most Unpopular”) and his other loser friends made one of those Harlem Shake videos and, like, of course it’s about three months after everyone completely got over the whole Harlem Shake video thing. So sad.

Who even are these people? Rumor around the cool section of the Senate cafeteria is that those non-professional dancers are all total randos McConnell met in his therapist’s waiting room. It’s true: Biden told Reid who told McCain who didn’t have to tell Graham because Graham can tell what McCain is thinking and feeling just by staring into his eyes.

McConnell and Co. actually told CNN that they were local college kids who “approached us about shooting it because they are all fired up to volunteer for Team Mitch!” Like, who’s going to believe that? Did McConnell not have enough time to think of a better excuse while he was eating Greek yogurt alone in a bathroom stall because he didn’t have anyone to sit with at lunch? Or was he too distracted by absolutely nothing else going on in his life?

Politico adds that “a McConnell spokesman said the typically stone-faced Senator ‘got a kick out of’ the video.” Oh my God, no, wrong reason he’s receiving kicks. Does that nerd still not realize there’s a “kick me” sign on his back?