The Holocaust Excuse

I never heard Zaidy Leo excuse his flaws by pointing the finger at Hitler.

“What if the Holocaust has become just another excuse for Israeli bad behavior?” Tony Judt, Israel without Cliches, The New York Times.

I winced when I read it.

I wince whenever the Holocaust is called into play for political gain, or tossed around to symbolize current perceived tragedy. But mostly, I wince for Zaidy Leo.

He was the grandfather I knew, who hugged with bone-snapping force. I wince for the man who suffered and grieved in silence. I wince for the father who longed to present a safe world to his children, who yearned to protect his wife, to shelter his family from hidden fears.

I wince for Zaidy Leo because he never mounted a Holocaust defense. He had flaws and bad behavior. He was scarred and scared, haunted and hopeful. He loved abundantly and relished the success of his children. He whispered names of lost relatives and teased his wife in tongues of Yiddish, Polish, Hebrew, and English. He toiled in soil, planting dreams among the orange trees. He was fluent with hammers and handy with the concrete, finding safety in the daily boundaries and leaving the ambiguous nightmares of yesterday stowed away. He placed his wife on a pedestal and defended her crown with unabashed praise. He looked to his children for the promise of tomorrow. He wasn’t perfect; he induced pain and smiles. He was human.

I never heard him delete his failures with the Holocaust button.

But never did I hear him delete his failures with the Holocaust button. Never did I hear him excuse his flaws by pointing the finger at Hitler. Never did I hear him claim the right to hurt others because of past torture. He didn’t showcase his wounds nor garner sympathy for his losses. He rejected pity and stood tall, priding himself on the homegrown achievements of this family born from the ashes.

He didn’t share the memories that cast the shadows under his eyes. He didn’t speak about the backbreaking labor camps, except for the single infamous comment over the din of a cocktail party crowd: “Cold? I’ll tell you cold!” in reference to coatless winters in Siberia. He never shared the gaping hole of 11 murdered siblings or the ache of simultaneously being orphaned and imprisoned. He didn’t detail the ravaging hunger of starvation, the fear of starring in horror, or the hopelessness of evil.

He didn’t excuse or point fingers. He carved his morals in stone and held exacting standards for his children. But he didn’t use the Holocaust as an excuse for bad behavior.

If anything, the Holocaust was his excuse for faith.

He stood up and gave credit to G0d, blessing the joys and sanctifying the tears.

He pointed at past scars as justification for daily prayer. He sought God as balm for his wounds, religion as containment for his fears. He leaned on holiness and found routine in tradition. Rather than use the Holocaust as an excuse for evil, he used it as a pillar of conviction. He stood up and gave credit to God, blessing the joys and sanctifying the tears. He prayed every morning, wrapping the tefillin around his forearm tightly, leaving imprints of holy reliance woven between numerical tattoos. He found spirituality nestled in trauma and wove religion into his survival coat.

I wish I knew his stories of courage, tales of solo immigration, the history of his confidence. I wish I knew where he stored his passion for life, how he kept it hidden from Nazi thieves, and how he remembered the code to begin from scratch. I wish I knew the language of his strength, not only to better understand my Zaidy, but also to scream it out for my own life. I wish I knew which seeds to nurture his steady faith, which tree to water for perseverance. I wish I knew more stories and details. I wish I had more time; more time to sit close, more time to listen to his heart.

But Zaidy Leo is gone and his queen is trapped in the childhood of Alzheimer’s.

So I wince at the suggestion that the Holocaust has become an excuse. I wince with anger, recounting the bad behavior that produced the Holocaust and seared its grief into Jewish futures. I wince at the implication that recent actions constitute ‘bad behavior’ at all.

If the Holocaust has been ‘used as an excuse,’ it has been to unify a religion, to propel growth, to motivate statehood. Perhaps the Holocaust has been an excuse to bond and motivate, to justify generosity and spur action. Perhaps the Holocaust has been used in order to teach genocide prevention or the perils of standing quietly on the sidelines ignoring pleas for help. Perhaps the Holocaust was our excuse for opening the borders of Israel and welcoming immigrants. Perhaps the Holocaust was our excuse for building museums of Tolerance or gently caring for our elderly survivors.

But don’t hide behind the Holocaust in order the criticize Israel. Don’t point fingers at Israel and simultaneously minimize the Holocaust. Don’t discredit a nation and dishonor a collective history. Don’t claim to be an educator while spreading fiction. Disagree with Israel if you want. State your opinion and pose your truth.

But, on behalf of Zaidy Leo, I beg you: leave the Holocaust out of it.

Featured at Aish.com:

About the Author

Lauren Bottner is a Jewish writer living in Los Angeles, California. She also is a 30 year old licensed therapist with her own therapist, a reader, sister, daughter, friend, library fanatic, obsessively neat, compulsively early former Hero child who plays at being a grown-up.

Visitor Comments: 24

(24)
surie,
March 7, 2013 9:48 PM

Thank you , I had the privilage to accompany my elderly Holocaust survivor ,Father to a shiva call. The room was filled with about 10 to 12 survivors. The mourner was a survivor as well. The atmosphere was warm as they recalled the departed. The emunana peshuta that these survivors have is unbeliveable. No one was bitter noone blamed ,no one asked where was G-D?

My Father said in Hebrew Hayu Zemani. loosely transelated "there where days". No other words can describe what they went through, pain,unger, facing death daily.These old timers where just teenagers some 70 years ago. thier entire families wiped out, homes decemtated. No complains. They all started a new, new country , new language, new marriages.

Rebuilt a new world.

(23)
Les Legato,
March 5, 2013 5:32 PM

Tony Judt needs his bris revoked.

He needs to convert out the islam he already subscribes to.
I don't understand why he hasn't been put under cherem already.
We need to toss these jinos out.

(22)
Lynne,
June 26, 2010 12:38 PM

Jewish writer, Tony Judt, has been critical of Israel for over 40 years. His June 9 op-ed piece, quoted above, is nothing new.

(21)
dennis bair,
June 25, 2010 4:42 PM

Very nice

Excellent points about your grandfather's strength. I just wish you wouldn't have said "I beg you" at the end. It puts us in a position of weakness, and weakness draws aggression as we all know. Our path to peace is strength through superior fire power, which we (Israel and Jews) currently have. We don't have to beg anyone for anything, let alone beg our enemies for some sort of sympathy or acknowledgement. Im sure men like your grandfather wouldn't beg his enemy for anything.

(20)
,
June 25, 2010 4:22 PM

re: mike lampard

Mike, you did not read this article closely - the author's point is that her Zaidy Leo did NOT use the holocaust as an excuse for anything, did not even share his experiences with his grandchildren. He drew spiritual strength for his new future from what happened to him, but didn't talk about it
How can you find offensive comments that were never made? It is people who form opinions and shout about insult & injustice before they take a good look at the facts that this article is protesting, in the name of Zaidy Leo... a type of attitude that you have ably demonstrated.

(19)
Anonymous,
June 25, 2010 1:51 PM

survivors were definitely one of a kind. I too had a father who survived. He too never blamed the Nazis for his shortcomings. It was always amazed me how he found strength to tackle life.
We'll never understand it but i believe his faith in god is what got him through daily challenges.

(18)
Mike Lampard,
June 23, 2010 7:43 PM

I find Zaidy Leo's comments offensive!

I wonder that anyone who has an ounce if historical knowledge can adopt such an attitude towards Israel and use the utmost suffering as something that he(or she) can hide behind, It beggars belief. As a non Jew, the holocaust is a MAJOR problem in the way it simply DELIBERATELY maximised suffering and murder TO THE ULTIMATE! How can anyone hide behind that? That this person even tries to do so states that he (or she) is an total peace of sewerage! Garbage!

(17)
Joanne,
June 23, 2010 2:17 AM

NYT once again gives OpEd space to an Anti-Semite?

I wonder if the NYT uses it's editorial anti-Israel bias as an excuse to print all the lies that fit on the OpEd page. I wonder if Judt is really a self-hater, since his name is Judt.

(16)
Anonymous,
June 22, 2010 5:35 PM

There is as much greatness of mind in acknowledging a good turn , as in doing it. Seneca

Like it or not - the Holocaust was a primary factor in the creation of Israel. Predestined ? I do not know.
Would Israel have been created without the Holocaust? I do not know. But the Bible is very clear that the Children of Israel would be gathered together.
Do Christians have double standards? Most do. But only an absolute idiot would not see the Jews as our spiritual forefathers.
Mentioning the Holocaust? Whenever necessary. So that it never happens again to anybody anywhere.
Beautiful article. Only because some things cannot be forgotten or lied about.

(15)
Shirley Halewood,
June 22, 2010 3:32 PM

I am for Peace, they are for war.

YOU MAKE PEACE WITH YOUR ENEMIES, NOT YOUR FRIENDS !

(14)
Nathans Schor,
June 22, 2010 3:10 PM

Very well expressed

Good for you! Exceptionally well expressed about a difficult and slippery but highly relevant topic.You've brilliantly highlighted yet another extraordinary character strength of those who survived, both my parents amongst them.

(13)
Anonymous,
June 22, 2010 6:03 AM

Thank you very much for this moving piece. You have enlightened me today.

(12)
Skip,
June 22, 2010 1:01 AM

Exceptional!!!

A very beautifully written article that displays tremendous insight, emotion, and clarity of expression. This author conveys exceptional sensitivity.

(11)
Barbara Dagen,
June 21, 2010 10:32 AM

Thank you for such a beautiful, touching article.

The world uses the Holocaust when it works for them.This is a touching beautiful story and I thank you for sharing it . May your Zayde and all the martyrs of the Holocaust rest in peace.

(10)
Chaya Weisberg,
June 21, 2010 5:39 AM

so beautifully written!

thank you so much. This article was written so beautifully. I can identify being that my grandparents were in similar circumstances, and agree it is completely outrageous to make a statement such as Tony Judt's.

(9)
Paul Winter,
June 21, 2010 2:41 AM

Holocaust excuse

Judt's pondering if the Holocaust is just an excuse for Israel's bad behaviour is an insult to survivors of the Shoah, like my wife and me, but an insult to any who can think; he expects us to accept his prejudice as a given, that Israel's behaviour is bad. He joins with haters of Israel and of Jews, in the lie that Jews use the Shoah to blackmail and exploit other peoples. The most outrageous aspect of this blood libel - for that is what it is - is that Jews are expected to display the unconditional forgiveness that Christians often preach but rarely practise to vengeful, implacable, cruel Moslems. Jews are expected to show limitless acceptance and tolerance because of our suffering even when it is asserted that it is only used to manipulate others for our gain. These same critics of Jews excuse Moslem barbarism, because they assert that those people are suffering, even when the suffering is imaginary and contrived. And, where partly true, self inflicted. Judt's intellectualisations must be rejected with all of the contempt that they have earned for themselves.

(8)
Beverly Kurtin,
June 21, 2010 1:41 AM

Ten Big Lies

The Wiesenthal Center has a listing of the ten biggest lies that are being told about Israel; the first is that Europe felt so badly about the Holocaust that they "gave" us our homeland.
Helen Thomas may she grow to learn the truth, said we ought to go back to our homes in Poland and Germany. Hah! Germany is less than 800 years old and Poland is about 200 years older than Germany. While Berlin and Warsaw were swamps, Jerusalem had a thriving community of Jews. Israel is 3-4,000 years old and THAT is our homeland. Europe was hoping that Hitler would succeed in killing all of us.
I do not read the lying NY Times or look at Reuter's pictures because they crop out knives dripping with Jewish blood.
The older I get, the more anger I feel towards the world. The only two democracies in the world are the ones who regularly get a black eye and a bloody nose no matter how much good we do.
Pick up your Torah right now. Go to Bereshit 12 (Genesis 12) and read it. Then look at the world. You think there isn't a Gd who is watching over us? The world is so messed up, the financial outlook for most countries is a nightmare. The world wonders why this is happening.
Hashem promised Abraham that he would bless them that blessed him and curse them that cursed him. The world is cursing us again and again.
When I tell people that the cell phone and the laptop computers, and diseases that have been cured thanks to Israel, they scoff. Scoff is you will world; Hashem is eternal as are his words
The only problem is that the ultra Orthodox doesn't want to give stipends to students other than themselves, European Jews don't want to study with students from Spain and Italy, etc. Fine. Every time that Jews hate each other for stupid reasons we LOOSE THE LAND, WE GET KICKED OUT.
We'd better start loving each other or be prepared to hold hands and walk into the ocean.

(7)
Marcia Weisb erg,
June 20, 2010 10:36 PM

Amazing article;amazing woman

I am speechless and don't where to begin or what words to praise this amazing young woman who must have demons of her own. She has, with unbelievable insight, love and compassion, captured and articulated the essence of her grandfather as well as the answer to an overused excuse and description of events when more appropriate words fail them. Her parents should indeed by proud and qvell till their hearts burst. .

(6)
kim segar,
June 20, 2010 7:12 PM

the Holocaust Excuse

thank you. I have read the Holocaust books, personal stories, still cry when I even think of such evil. this precious man was full of love, never letting the hurt and hell efect him or his life. and knows that one day all of G-d's chosen will be together forever and that G-d did not and never will forget HIS Chosen People, and like G-d, they are my very heart. I am concerned that the world is uneducated and that so many do not realize it was six million Jews and also millions of Christians. and it is coming like a freight train around the world, so I keep right on warning and reporting so we can say NEVER AGAIN by standing up against this present threat that is growing daily. and we will win...because G-d is with us and for us..

(5)
Anonymous,
June 20, 2010 7:11 PM

I wish this were true of all Holocaust survivors

I unfortunately know people who have used the Holocaust to justify mistreatment of their children ("my parents and I were separated in the war so I didn't know how to be a good parent"), secularism ("I don't care about all that religious stuff, it didn't keep the Nazis from murdering Jews"), etc. As for political comparisions, however -- it's absolutely true that in modern history, there has not been anything identical to the Holocaust.

(4)
Dr. Judy Freier,
June 20, 2010 6:58 PM

Beautiful thoughts; beautifully written!

Thank you for sharing your zaidy with us. It is horrific how the horrors of the Holocaust have come back to haunt us in a distorted fashion. If only the world could learn from your zaidy!

(3)
Anonymous,
June 20, 2010 5:36 PM

learn and move on

well, i only red the 4 lines and was really touched by the author. thanks

(2)
Mary Hawkins,
June 20, 2010 4:14 PM

WOW!

I have been studying and teaching the Holocaust for many years. This is so POWERFUL. I am writng an inservice for area teachers and would love to use this article.
I am not Jewish and there are so many things that I don't know. I too can identify with allowing my parents stories go with them to the grave. I would love to be able to talk to them once again.
I live in a rural area and teach at the high school that I graduated from. Our school is actually on an island that was once home to native Americans. There are so many injustices in our culture. I teach difficult issues in hopes that my students will be strong and not repeat the bad decisions that others have made.
Thanks for sharing this.

(1)
Jacky Sebag,
June 20, 2010 2:37 PM

great as usual

You are such naughty. you made me cry.
Lauren, you are becoming my favorite writer!

I live in rural Montana where the Cholov Yisrael milk is difficult to obtain and very expensive. So I drink regular milk. What is your view on this?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

Jewish law requires that there be rabbinic supervision during the milking process to ensure that the milk comes from a kosher animal. In the United States, many people rely on the Department of Agriculture's regulations and controls as sufficiently stringent to fulfill the rabbinic requirement for supervision.

Most of the major Kashrut organizations in the United States rely on this as well. You will therefore find many kosher products in America certified with a 'D' next to the kosher symbol. Such products – unless otherwise specified on the label – are not Cholov Yisrael and are assumed kosher based on the DOA's guarantee.

There are many, however, do not rely on this, and will eat only dairy products that are designated as Cholov Yisrael (literally, "Jewish milk"). This is particularly true in large Jewish communities, where Cholov Yisrael is widely available.

Rabbi Moshe Feinstein wrote that under limited conditions, such as an institution which consumes a lot of milk and Cholov Yisrael is generally unavailable or especially expensive, American milk is acceptable, as the government supervision is adequate to prevent non-kosher ingredients from being added.

It should be added that the above only applies to milk itself, which is marketed as pure cow's milk. All other dairy products, such as cheeses and butter, may contain non-kosher ingredients and always require kosher certification. In addition, Rabbi Feinstein's ruling applies only in the United States, where government regulations are considered reliable. In other parts of the world, including Europe, Cholov Yisrael is a requirement.

There are additional esoteric reasons for being stringent regarding Cholov Yisrael, and because of this it is generally advisable to consume only Cholov Yisroel dairy foods.

In 1889, 800 Jews arrived in Buenos Aires, marking the birth of the modern Jewish community in Argentina. These immigrants were fleeing poverty and pogroms in Russia, and moved to Argentina because of its open door policy of immigration. By 1920, more than 150,000 Jews were living in Argentina. Juan Peron's rise to power in 1946 was an ominous sign, as he was a Nazi sympathizer with fascist leanings. Peron halted Jewish immigration to Argentina, introduced mandatory Catholic religious instruction in public schools, and allowed Argentina to become a haven for fleeing Nazis. (In 1960, Israeli agents abducted Adolf Eichmann from a Buenos Aires suburb.) Today, Argentina has the largest Jewish community in Latin America with 250,000, though terror attacks have prompted many young people to emigrate. In 1992, the Israeli Embassy in Buenos Aires was bombed, killing 32 people. In 1994, the Jewish community headquarters in Buenos Aires was bombed, killing 85 people. The perpetrators have never been apprehended.

Be aware of what situations and behaviors give you pleasure. When you feel excessively sad and cannot change your attitude, make a conscious effort to take some action that might alleviate your sadness.

If you anticipate feeling sad, prepare a list of things that might make you feel better. It could be talking to a specific enthusiastic individual, running, taking a walk in a quiet area, looking at pictures of family, listening to music, or reading inspiring words.

While our attitude is a major factor in sadness, lack of positive external situations and events play an important role in how we feel.

[If a criminal has been executed by hanging] his body may not remain suspended overnight ... because it is an insult to God (Deuteronomy 21:23).

Rashi explains that since man was created in the image of God, anything that disparages man is disparaging God as well.

Chilul Hashem, bringing disgrace to the Divine Name, is one of the greatest sins in the Torah. The opposite of chilul Hashem is kiddush Hashem, sanctifying the Divine Name. While this topic has several dimensions to it, there is a living kiddush Hashem which occurs when a Jew behaves in a manner that merits the respect and admiration of other people, who thereby respect the Torah of Israel.

What is chilul Hashem? One Talmudic author stated, "It is when I buy meat from the butcher and delay paying him" (Yoma 86a). To cause someone to say that a Torah scholar is anything less than scrupulous in meeting his obligations is to cause people to lose respect for the Torah.

Suppose someone offers us a business deal of questionable legality. Is the personal gain worth the possible dishonor that we bring not only upon ourselves, but on our nation? If our personal reputation is ours to handle in whatever way we please, shouldn't we handle the reputation of our nation and the God we represent with maximum care?

Jews have given so much, even their lives, for kiddush Hashem. Can we not forego a few dollars to avoid chilul Hashem?

Today I shall...

be scrupulous in all my transactions and relationships to avoid the possibility of bringing dishonor to my God and people.

With stories and insights,
Rabbi Twerski's new book Twerski on Machzor makes Rosh Hashanah prayers more meaningful. Click here to order...