Changing Belief

Description

When you are doing something that you know is wrong, stop and reflect. What
are the beliefs you have that are perpetuating this action?

Some beliefs that can lead to harmful action include:

I do not deserve to do well.

I can't do that.

I have to do this.

I can't stop myself.

One way of changing an absolute belief, such 'I can't' is to ask 'Can anyone'
or 'Have you ever'. By finding one example that breaks a belief, you show
yourself that the belief is not true.

Example

A person who is trying to stop smoking believes that because it
is a chemical and neurological effect, then it is impossible to quit. But then a
friend reminds them that many people have given up.

When a person who is trying to stop procrastinating thinks
about why they do this, they find that they have an underlying belief that they
will be able to 'do it in time' or 'do it later', and then believe there will be
no consequences for putting it off again. Thinking about it, they realize that
there are significant consequences for them a little further into the future.

Discussion

Beliefs are often not
proven truths in the way that scientific facts are true. They are often actually
assumptions, based on very limited experience, faulty thinking or hearsay. Many
beliefs are founded in childhood, where our understanding and experience of the
world is limited. Yet we cling to those early beliefs, often to our longer-term
and continuing detriment.

Beliefs are such a fundamental part of how we understand and live in the
world we often do not realize that we hold them. And even if we do, we consider
them to be immutable. In consequence, we do not think about the possibility of
changing them. Yet if we do take the time to think about this, there is no
reason why we cannot change them.

A powerful and simple way of changing beliefs is by
reframing them. That is, by looking at
the situation in a new light, seeing things in different ways and realizing that
there are better truths and beliefs.

Even if you cannot be certain about something, you still may have to make
some decision and hold some tentative belief. In any such situation, the best
approach is often just to think 'what belief would serve me best, particularly
in the longer term', and then adopt this.