Friday, April 25, 2014

This was supposed to post on April 25 and didn't for some reason ... So ignore the date.

This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do...

Sitting here looking at the monitor with you laying in your crib, screaming.

Now before you call me a horrible mother (which you may still after reading this), let me explain. You are not a sleeper. Well, youre a sleep-on-mommy-and-only-mommy sleeper. You have learned over time the only way to fall a sleep is on me.

Naps? Have to fall asleep on me.

Bedtime? Have to fall asleep on me.

Wake up at 11:30 pm? And 1:00 am? And 3:00 am? And 5:00 am? Have to fall back asleep on me...

You have slept through the night on several occasions. There was a whole month when you were around 3 months old that you slept all night every night. But ever since then it's been an oddity. On a normal night, you wake up twice. On a good night? You wake up once or sleep all night (happens maybe once very few weeks). Bad night? 4 or 5 times up. Or only 2 - 3 but you stay up for an hour one of those times. Typically you fall asleep around 8:30 pm and wake up between 7 - 8 am.

This also makes naps short and difficult. There was a time when I could only lay you down for a nap for 10 minutes or so before you'd wake up. Currently - your morning nap will last between an hour and an hour and a half. Usually you wake up part of the way through and require me to get you back to sleep. Afternoon naps average 30-45 minutes.

Needless to say - you should be sleeping more. And you should be sleeping through the night and putting yourself to sleep.

I know this is my fault. When you were younger, you'd fall asleep while nursing. And I thought you were still genuinely eating, so I'd let you stay latched on. Hence the days of 6+ hours of nursing and no pacifiers. Eventually I learned to recognize when you were no longer eating and just comfort sucking, and would put a paci in your mouth.