Dear Jorjah Rae,

You came into my life from a farm in a rainstorm. We thought we were going to pick up a little 3 month old puppy… ha! You were such a big little thing… the small boy that delivered you to us was smothered by your fuzzy fur and wonderful girth. I loved you from that moment on!

For weeks after you came into our lives, you smelled like you were born in a barn … which you were. Even after several bubble baths; which you weren’t so fond of… that foul and wonderful smell lingered. To this day, every time I pass a cow pasture, I think of you and smile.

Life became very difficult for me just after your second birthday. You were forced to endure the biting pain of your best friend and mommas depression. You were always there for me even when I wasn’t there for myself… or for you. At times, you were the ONLY one there. I know you didn’t know what to do to make me feel better so you did the only thing you knew how… you’d lay with me, hit me with your heavy hand, put your wonderful head in my lap and show me that you loved me… even though I didn’t love myself.

I had to make a a very difficult decision one day…. I made a painful choice to send you to a place that was free of the pain and sadness I know you must have been feeling. I couldn’t give you the attention and exercise that you needed and deserved… It broke my heart to know once I said goodbye, there would be no turning back. My heart still longs for your hugs and our days of swimming at the beach.

But I hear that you are so very happy now. You get to go running every day, sleep on the “new” couch and have all the love I could ever ask for you… I know that you love your new mom and dad… I see it in your eyes when they send pictures of you. I’m sure that I did the right thing in passing your wonderful love onto people that would love and cherish you as much as I have.