Dr. Hodge - CDC representative, pretty gutsy for a desk jockey. Has his throat ripped out by Bert and Ernie.

Mayor Branson - Local elected official, about as effective as dirt.

Deputy Wesley - Kimsey's friend, just here to be eaten.

Dr. McCabe - Mad scientist who created Bert and Ernie, wanders around believing he can control them until his winged terrors set that record straight.

Bert and Ernie - The two genetically altered bats from McCabe's lab, they appear to be Pugs with wings. Bert gets toasted during a really confusing scene and Ernie is run over by a truck.

The Bats - Normal insectivores infected with a virus carried by Bert and Ernie, it turns them into killers! Frozen to death.

The Plot:

When you name your movie "Bats" everyone has a general idea what the monster is, though they might not imagine something which looks like a winged Pug. You heard me, those ugly little dogs which appear to have run muzzle first into a wall, with wings. Oh, and they're mean, real mean.

Despite an interesting beginning the movie quickly degrades into frontal lobotomy territory, not the least of which is a patented military response. First off they're determined to eradicate the bats through bombs and antitank missiles, then an attempt to destroy the roost at night gets them all killed, since most recruits have at least high school diplomas these days I'd say our public education system is worthless. Not that it would matter, the creatures at hand are nigh invulnerable, only serious firepower can harm them. Bats (Even mutated ones.) are fairly light, this facilitates the miracle of flight, a female ballet dancer rolling over one would do some damage. Except to this variety, it just gets them mad.

By the way, Sheriff Kimsey is the best shot I've seen in my life, any guy who can score perfect shooting at flitting targets with a pistol is a God.

After losing half the town's population to an attack everyone is evacuated, except the civilian researchers who barricade themselves into the school. Why they stayed in town I have no idea, but it gave McCabe a chance to degenerate into mad scientist mode just prior to his death.

With an air strike scheduled to bomb the bat's cave (Huh?) it's up to Sheila and Kimsey, they must carry out the original plan: Turn on a huge refrigeration unit and freeze the creatures to death. Too bad for the bats, they're only highly intelligent when the script requires... ...such as destroying a member of the swarm when it has been captured and fitted with a tracking device, the idea to change caves after being discovered never dawns on them.

Things I Learned From This Movie:

Half second images flashed on the screen are impossible to follow and annoying.

The CDC (Center for Disease Control) is in charge of bat outbreaks.

Any sort of netting reminds law enforcement types of prostitute clothing.

A two pound bat can knock a man weighing eighty times that off his bike and proceed to kick his ass.

Overall this movie was even cornier than Tango and Cash,and that is a damn corny movie.Also why the f$&@ can something crawl into the exhaust pipe and moments later in through the air vent? If that was my car i think that i would have to get that piece of SH7T checked out. Also since when do those fu)king bat burrow into the ground and pop up at the same time the trucks tire is there. CHEEE-ZEE. We should build a time machine just to go back and stop the making of this god-awful movie.

lol, yeah, I'm blonde and even I don't get that schematic.....exhaust pipe connected to the air vent?? while we are in the time machine, we have to stop off on the set of Megalodon vs. Giant Octopus, I must speak to Lorenzo Lamas and Debbi (yes, I said DEBBI, not Debra!) Gibson.