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I’M A BIG TRAITOR!!

Dear Nikki,
I just blabbed to my BFF’s crush that I liked him right before she was about to ask him to the school dance. And now, I feel like such a TRAITOR! What should I do?

Total Traitor

Hi Total Traitor,

Okay, this is not good. But I want to thank you for being honest about what you did. A lot of people write me about terrible things other people have done to them (which is fine, since people need advice on that). But, people don’t write much to admit the terrible things they’ve done to other people unless they’re SUPER BRAVE. So you’re super brave, because you know you did something crummy and you’re not afraid to admit it.

So, um…I going to be really honest with you too. I’m afraid that what you just did could really upset your BFF. I’m not trying to make you feel worse, I just really want you to sort things out with her before it hurts your friendship!

Here are a couple things that you could do…

First, you HAVE to make things right with your BFF. If she doesn’t already know what you did, you need to come clean. Please don’t try to cover things up. She’ll find out eventually and it’ll be WAY worse if you tried to lie. You need to admit how uncool it was to tell her crush you liked him before she could ask him to the dance. Then, just say you’re sorry. Please do not make any excuses. That’s important. You were wrong and you have to admit it fully, or she may not trust your apology.

Second, ask her if there’s anything you can do to make things right with her. Now, there is a slight chance that she might not know how. Or, she might forgive you right away. She might even need some time and space to be upset about the whole thing, but fingers crossed that this won’t happen! You have to respect however she responds, because of what you did.

But the good news is that if SHE ever messes up (because we all do sometimes), she will remember how you handled things and hopefully she’ll handle things the same way…willing to apologize and make up for it.

Okay, so about the guy. Sounds like you’re kind of crushing on him too, right? But, you knew your BFF liked him first? Ultimately, it’s up to him how he wants to handle this, but if he still wants to go to the dance with your BFF, please don’t feel bad. Crushes don’t last forever. Besides, it’d probably be A LOT easier on you AND your BFF (AND your crush!) if you started liking a guy your BFF doesn’t like!

Truth be told, it looks like you’re more interested in a clear conscience than trying to steal your BFF’s crush away. So, keep on trying to be the kind of BFF you’d want her to be to you, and remember: SISTERS BEFORE MISTERS! 🙂

Have you ever done something terrible to your BFF? Did you confess? How did you make it right? Tell us in the comments!

Once I lied to my friends that my BOY friend was my crush because they all had a crush and I didn’t have one! They all asked my BOY friend if it was true and he suddenly went all pale and from that day on he started ignoring me.

I think you should just say you’re sorry, really sorry. and if your BFF still doesn’t forgive, then give her some time. hey! he might actually like you more than your BFF! and maybe you should also tell your BFF and her crush why you did that. you know lots of people go through that.

My bffs had a crush on the same guy they became mad at each other. They kept asking me to help them get him for them but I said no to both of them since I loved them both. They kept on over welming him saying who are you taking to the spring dance and asking him who he likes. I was so confused one sec my bffs were friends but next thing you know it they are at each other’s throats. I was trying to spend time with each of them separately and trying to exsplain they need to say sorry to each other. None of them listened to me they kept on going insane over this boy. I took it in to my own hands to talk to this boy . Here’s what happened I told him im sorry about my friends and they are sorry to even though they can’t admit it. He said it was ok and said are you going to the dance I was like yeah because I was on the dance preparation committee. Then he asked me if I could go with him because he likes me.

Same my Bff has the same crush as me.but then I figured out that he likes her.Then for the Valentines dance I asked him and he said yes. Then she saw me dancing with his and she got mad at me because she thought that I wanted to steal him from her :(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!And after that our frendship was over 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 :(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Freaking out about a crush problem? Major drama in school? Bratty little sister driving you crazy? No worries! I’m here to help! Tell me what’s up and I’ll give you the best advice I can. Just ask Chloe and Zoey…I’m awesome at giving advice!! I’ll try to answer a question each week, depending on how much homework I have!