Then he’ll dump the Buckeyes like Ashton two-timed Demi, and Middle America all will realize what Florida fans already know.

Urban is a myth and Urban renewal will lead to Urban decay.

I warned last week that the play on “Urban” headlines was on the way. Sure enough, the blight has begun. I also wrote that Gators fans should get over whatever animosity they feel and thank Meyer for the memories.

It pained me a bit because Urban’s never been the media’s best friend. He’s secretive, calculating and controlling to the point of paranoia. In other words, he’s all too typical of the modern coaching model popularized by Nick Saban.

That accounts for some of the vitriol now being showered on Meyer. It again pains me to rush to Urban’s defense, but if a likeable guy returned after taking a year off we’d say football is lucky to have him back.

Meyer is back after a year off, and critics are saying Ohio State just hired Bernie Madoff. It all gets back to Meyer’s on-again, off-again, on-again breakups with the Gators. He said this at his final retirement announcement last December.

“At this time in my life … I appreciate the sacrifices my 24/7 profession has demanded of me, and I know it is time to put my focus on my family and life away from the field.”

Some people apparently interpreted that to mean that at age 46, Meyer would never coach again. Or at the very least he would spend the next three or four years making origami sculptures while re-learning his kids’ names.

Now he’s back after just 12 months?

Urban Liar!

According to the latest reviews, Meyer faked his burnout death because he knew the Gators were going to stink this year. Saban had passed him by, and Meyer’s bloated ego couldn’t stand any more beatings.

Meyer unquestionably wasn’t as good a coach at the end of his tenure as he was at the beginning. Neil Young sang that it’s better to burn out than fade away. Meyer did both.

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The burnout thing was real, even if Meyer refused to let his robot façade down and show us the MRI images of his stomach. He should have left after his first “retirement,” but the coaching demon was too strong.

After the frazzled 2010, he realized he needed to fade away. But at his farewell news conference, Meyer left the door open to coaching again. The distinct impression was it was more a probability than a possibility.

He never put a time frame on how long he would be gone. He never said he wouldn’t do TV work. He didn’t say Will Muschamp should beat LSU and Alabama in his first season.

So where was the deception, much less the lies?

How many of us spent the past 12 months in the Meyer’s house observing what went on? He said he helped coach his son’s baseball team. He attended dozens of his girls’ volleyball matches. Maybe he really did join the Gainesville Origami Club.

I doubt it, since Meyer devoted about half his autumn weeks to ESPN, and Kirk Herbstreit reportedly doesn’t do origami. But after coaching seven days a week for the past 25 years, dilly-dallying as an analyst had to feel like a vacation.

Then again, what do I know? What do any of us really know when it comes to somebody else’s burnout rehab?

He’s probably not the same person he was a year ago, and that’s a good thing. Whether he’s the same coach he was in 2006, we’re about to find out.

If the Buckeyes start resembling this year’s Gators and Meyer resigns for “health reasons” in three years, then I’ll believe Urban was more scam artist than coach.

My guess is in three years, he’ll be as beloved in Columbus as he was in Gainesville. And all the burnout questions will have quickly faded away.