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Editorial Reviews

It's spring break and these college kids just want to party. When they charter a boat to take them to a rave on a nearby island, they find it completely deserted, except for the bloodthirsty zombies that have taken it over. A frantic search begins for weapons to use against the encroaching killers because, as nighttime falls, they realize that their only hope for survival is to witn the final battle...in the HOUSE OF THE DEAD.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

There are people out there who will greenlight anything! That is the only explanation I can offer as to why the House of the Dead movie exists. And that's only scary part to the whole movie. It's so bad you'll go off movies forever. I seriously wanted to switch this off and turn the TV over to the Paint Drying channel but I was bound by my word to suffer the whole thing. I don't know why I do these bad things to myself.As if it matters, here's the basic jist of the 'story'. A group of twenty-somethings are so desperate to go out to some island in the Pacific Northwest (Canada actually, because it's cheap) for the 'Rave of the Century' (which consists of about 8 people and un-raving music) that they pay some craggy old fisherman $1000 to take them there after they miss the main ferry. That's gotta be some rave to be worth all that dough! The fisherman warns them that the island is also known as the Island of the Dead (hang on-I thought this was HOUSE of the Dead?) and that they are all doomed yadda yadda yadda.First faults here. Why would a tiny little rave (of the Century my foot!) be held on some remote island? Why would anyone willingly pay loads of money to get it? Why pay even more to the craggy old fisherman to take them back when they could just come back with the others?Once they arrive they discover that the rave (which consists of about 2 tents, a small stage and a port-a-john) has been smashed, there's blood everywhere and no one is around. What would any rationally thinking person do? Run for their lives of course. But no, these clueless, obviously blind people decide to go look for them. Soon enough they discover an old ramshackle house that's 50 times as big on the inside as it is on the outside.Read more ›

This terrible movie is so poorly made that it goes down in cinema history as the WORST zombie movie ever made.The plot(if there was one) was a bunch of teens visiting an island and battling zombies.This is a very stupid,horrible time-waster.

Wow was this a stinker ...It was really god-awful. Horrible in a way that I can barely put into words. Terrible in a way that will make you feel like your IQ dropped after you saw it. Rotten to the point where you question if you want to live in a world where garbage like this can be churned up for the masses. Ranicd to the point where you wonder how anyone from this production will ever get work in Hollywood. It's such a staggering, earth-shattering, mind-numbing mess that you have to tell others to watch it to see for themselves the kind of depths this "film" can sink to.You know it's bad when ...... The audience is informed IMMEDIATELY who lives and who dies; robbing us of at least having a little fun picking out who will survive.... The production team will earn an R rating for all the gratitutius topless scenes, but 90% of the killing will take place off-camera.... The production team (I was cracking up over this) uses CUTS FROM THE VIDEO GAME as scene transitions.... Some of the zombies running around in the background aren't in any kind of makeup.... The outrageous number of times they used a matrix-style "bullet-time" camera pan. It must have been a dozen times, right in a row. I was actually starting to get a little dizzy.... The leading actress can take a broad-sword RIGHT TO THE CENTER OF HER CHEST and survive the night with no medical attention.It may be one of the top three worst movies I've ever seen. You've got to check it out ...

After watching the commentary on Alone in the Dark to hear what he had

to say for himself, I learned that Uwe Boll does not create such

terrible, terrible film out of a lack of caring or complete negligence,

he really does believe in every mis-cut one-dimensional broken piece of

action shot quipped with bad dialog he is responsible for.

This movie doesn't even need to have the commentary to feel this from

him. Immersed in all of it's terrible glory, one can still feel the

love Uwe Boll has from the camera as he misdirects scene after

horrible, horrible scene.

A rave is being held on the Isle del Muerte (and in this case Uwe Boll insults our intelligence again by actually having a character translate this to us: "That means The Island of the Dead!" He's the same character who states "Sprechen Sie English?" What a multilingual type!) Some characters pay over a thousand dollars to get to this party (why?!?!?!), but when they get there, no one's around. Irregardless, they go about dancing, drinking beer, sexing it up... but despite their total lack of ability to do anything anybody normal would do, like wonder where everybody went or whatever, they get pulled into the action anyways. Or whatever.

Rain falls on a boat but never on the island. Day and night seem to come whenever it feels like it. Zombies are scary by putting their hands on trees and flying.Read more ›