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Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

We have a joint account that we put equal amounts into and I have a farm account that I pay my farm expenses from. We keep the farm totally separate so that he is not a "active participant". He's an architect and the lawyers recommend neither is involved in the others business.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

wife and I put 80 pecent in a joint and 20 percent into personal accounts for when she wants to buy some new thousand dollar purse that is insane or when I want to go to Vegas and spend a grand on a stripper to tell me i'm cute. It works very well. IF you have direct deposit its really easy to set up.

The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

It sounds to me like most of those who have separate accounts "blow" more and discuss less than those with joint. More power to you if you can make it work though.

No matter what it comes down to how well you communicate and are on the same page about how to spend and what not. Your marriage is going to get screwed up no matter what if you hold ill will against the other about their habits. This applies to more than just money.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

Originally Posted by wxman1

It sounds to me like most of those who have separate accounts "blow" more and discuss less than those with joint. More power to you if you can make it work though.

No matter what it comes down to how well you communicate and are on the same page about how to spend and what not. Your marriage is going to get screwed up no matter what if you hold ill will against the other about their habits. This applies to more than just money.

sigh....thanks for the advice Dr. It works if both parties are adults and one person isn't a dominating *******.

The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

I guess I have yet to see why people think "its a hassle" to have separate accounts?

I have my account and know what I'm responsible for and so does she with her account. To me, that's not any more work.

I don't think it necessarily sounds like more work, it just sounds like a lot of people who have separate accounts do it because they either don't want tell/ask to be able to spend money or want to be able to spend money without their spouse knowing, neither of which sound all that marriagey (I made that word up).

Also the aspect of splitting bills somehow seems weird to me, I'll pay mortgage, you pay cable, I pay phone bill, you pay insurance, seems odd again. That's what you do when you have a roommate.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

Originally Posted by thatguy

wife and I put 80 pecent in a joint and 20 percent into personal accounts for when she wants to buy some new thousand dollar purse that is insane or when I want to go to Vegas and spend a grand on a stripper to tell me i'm cute. It works very well. IF you have direct deposit its really easy to set up.

Do you just not want to see what she spends the money on? Or vice versa?

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

no one has answered my question about separate accounts and saving toward a common big goal like a house or car. That would seem the most annoying to me just from experience trying to save and pay for our wedding out of separate accounts.

But whatever works, like wxman said, as long as there is good communication and understanding about what the goals and expectations are - which is important in any marriage, however you do your finances.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

Originally Posted by SwirlingFloater

We also have couple friends that do the joint account where the husband by far has the larger income, but the wife keeps the checkbook in her purse. The husband has to ask the wife for allowance or money to buy something he wants. (No matter how small the item)

Seems that the wife has a little more than the family checkbook stuffed in that purse.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

Originally Posted by wxman1

Stupid to do seperates, it is like your roommates and are half assing your marriage. When you get married you combine your ENTIRE lives.

This ..... I can't imagine how doing it separately makes any sense at all. When you get married it's all the way in everything. This is just one more reason marriages are disposable today. I insisted on joint immediately when I got married 20+ years ago and I make 3x what my wife makes.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

I will probably keep separate at first. I don't see whats wrong with having separate as long as you each pay the bills proportionate to your income. I don't expect her to pay for my student loans or anything like that, I just like to know how much money I have and we would discuss any big purchases, we already do and we aren't married. I wouldn't be keeping them separate so I could buy stupid crap, I'd do it to make extra payments on loans and other purchases that would benefit both of us. We give each other money when we need it, I just like my money going to getting out of debt rather than a pair of $200 Ugg boots that will be destroyed in a year ot two.

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

not being judgy with my post, this is just what works for us: 2 joint accounts we live mostly on 1 income we have a cash budget every month so not every little thing tracked we plan major purchases together - this is usually long annoying meetings but good to talk about

Re: Married Fanatics: Joint money or separate money?

Not married and we were both older going in.

We each had our own accounts but once we decided to be together we opened a joint account that we each put $250 in every other week. That pays for groceries, utilities, household expenses, etc. Basically everything that we share.

We each keep our own accounts and split house payments. It evolved kind of naturally and works for us. Sometimes we need to supplement the joint account (i. e. big vet payment last fall) and we each just add some out of schedule to cover it. Our spending habits are WAAAY different and at our ages are not going to change so it works out well for us.

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