Tuesday, February 12, 2013

His Birthday was coming up there is no way to wish him a happy birthday unless I call him, So it was 20/9 and aziz's birthday is on the 21st, I waited till the clock strinked 12 and called him immdiatly
I called once
twice
three times
And all I could hear was the machine repeating the same words that "the mobile is switched off or is out of the coverage area"
Now what? his bb was off as well so he couldn't receive anything on bbm or whatsapp. I got so frustrated how could he keep his phone shut the whole time he's there.
He would've atleast get an english sim card and connect the bbm, but who am I to tell him.
I decided to send him a whatsapp maybe he'll just connect his phone to the wifiتمنيت أكون أول من يهنيكوأكون فهاليوم منك قريب بس شاءتالأقداروكل واحد منافطريقمدري من السبب أنا ولاّ إنت بس اللي أعرفهكل واحد منا عن الثاني بعيدحبيبي أنامانسيت وبهاليوم الشمع ضويتولما جا الوقت طيفك هنيتكل عام وانت بخيرترى والله لك حنيت

There was no response from Aziz, Even though he read it, he didnt reply in other words aziz ignored me when I wished him all the best! I gave up on him i"m giving him my all and he's not willing to give me a couple of minutes from his time. How come he doesnt misss me when all I do is miss him? ma akser 5a6ra 7ata? ma3goola akoo nas yt'3ayirown chthee?

أكثر مآ يؤلمني هو آنك تعلم أني كل ما آكتبه يقصدك وآنت مآزلت تقرأ ﺑصمت

Days passed by so slowly I couldn't wait till he gets back here so that I get things cleared up with up. I am fed up this time I am not backing out I have to confront him! atleast I could move on I just need an answer to whats going on!

Sunday, February 10, 2013

I know that I'm not a good blogger and it takes me forever to post but things keep coming up that distract me from the blog. madree itha layl7en feee nas tgra my blog, bas this to all of you waiting enjoy ;*

As I mentioned before things with 3azeez kept getting worse over time and I kept hanging on to him. He was the first guy that I fall in love with. I was so attached to him that the thought of losing him just breaks my heart! He used to be so good to me and I don't really know what happened? Is it possible that he replaced me with someone else? A girl that would keep her man satisfied and happy. I was never going to give him more than what he got because I'm better than this! t3arfooon laama 6ol 3omrkom masken roo7kom min inkom t7iboon witkalmoom o lama tyeen t7beenlich wa7id '6ameerich dayman iy2anbich and your pride keeps you from doing many things that other girls are willing to do?

That was how i felt back then I was hopeless I couldn't do anything about it because I cant mention this to anyone or Id be dead by now! I was young, stupid, and confused. I had no one to guide me and tell me that what I was doing is just meaningless. Iwanted to take and a risk and confront him about the way I felt which to be honest is miserable, I was sad and depressed most of the time unlike other girls who were insanely happy and madly inlove.

outgoing call: A
it kept ringing and ringing and he didn't pick up, typical

my phone buzzed indicating that I have received an sms
from: A
wya ilrb3 shfech

reply:
Awal matf'6a call me

I waited till midnight, he hasn't called so I drifted to sleep, at around 4am my phone was vibrating nonstop I knew that someone was calling so I instantly pressed on the green button

Aziz decided to travel with his friends to London during the summer break and I was done with Highschool going on to Uni, I didn't travel that summer because of the things that I had to do with registering and taking placement tests and all.

Aziz talked me into getting bbm back so I did in order for us to improve our relationship he told me that through bbm we could talk to each other 24/7 rather than signing in and out from msn.

At the beginning we were so good we would tallk to each other the whole day like old days, then slowly Aziz started to back off, I might send him a text and he'd reply after 4 or 5 hours not even minutes. It was crazy but I got the hang of it.