About Me

I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Friday, October 21, 2016

FRIDAY #2858

Trump didn't promise to accept the election results and people are going out of their minds. Do you people remember all the talk about Bush stealing the election? It went on for years.

I hate it when people just flat out lie.She never ever said that. There is plenty of stories to attack her on without resorting to making shit up.>The Iraqi Army seems to be back on track. It's amazing what billions of dollars in new weapons can do. Did you know we have given them M1 Abrams tanks? Let us pray.

I wonder if the leaders of ISIS knows that if they use chemical weapons and somehow manage to survive the attack that they would be tried as war criminals.>I'm not much for jumping of fads, but I did this one.But I got a thing for children. That's the exact color of a Bud Light bottle.>It's a shitty year for my sports teams. My Packers are going to shit. My Gamecocks have gone to shit. And every time the Cubs play I wait for them to go to shit.

>I'm "the cord popped out of the phone cause I tried to stretch it from the kitchen to the kitchen" years old.

>A site I visit regularly posts survival tips every once in a while. Here are two ways to make arrowheads made from keys.

>Dash cam view of bicyclist on highway.What Happens Next?A. And ostrich runs by.B. The guy gets his seat post up his ass.C. The car runs over the guy as he screams for mercy for breaking every known traffic law cause he's a bike, you know.D. The guy runs off the road over a cliff, but it's okay because he's wearing a parachute.E. Noting odd happens.F. Something odd happens, but it would take too long to describe it.

>PUBLIC ARTI find this one a bit confusing...

Speaking of women in water...David Mach °1956, Methil, Schotland The nipples are a nice touch.

Tombili, Istanbul 's most famous cat, died and was commemorated by its hometown.

>Hey guys, remember when you could still refer to your knees as right and left instead of good and bad?

>ANIMALS

A. And ostrich runs by.

Know what this is?A muddy water buffalo.

Toughie was a famed Rabbs’ fringe-limbed tree frog and the last known member of his species. He had mottled brown skin and a strange bird-like call. He was described as “handsome,” had his own Wikipedia page and won the hearts of race car drivers and movie directors. (when I read that last sentence)Race car drivers? Handsome?

Cane toads are poisonous, and in Northeast Australia they’re absolutely everywhere. So what’s one to do with a surplus of toads? Stack them, of course.These thing literally cover the ground. Now toad stacking is a thing. It only makes sense.

Who could have known they could or would do this?If you guys aren't awed by fire spinning cats, then I give up.

>I always cut them some slack. Just maybe they have a bleeding child in the car.

>The most American piece of art.I had never seen both views before.

>Spacex's Interplanetary Transport System will be powered by Methane and Liquid Oxygen – both can be made on Mars – with the majority of the rocket and tanks being made out of advanced carbon fiber.The tank shown here would be in the Spaceship and house the liquid oxygen.

>These traditional Chinese Suomian noodles have been made in Nanshan Village for over 300 years.Supposedly there are only 300 people left in the world who know how to make them.

> On January 30, 1990 after 20 years of negotiation the first Soviet McDonalds opened its doors. 1000 people were expected to show up at the grand opening. 30,000 actually turned out.This guy is probably an ex-Soviet KGB guy and none too pleased with this "progress"...

>1) Yes

Δ) No

%) I love you guys

M) 8

•) Potato

>Wow.

>Several male and female homosexuals work at my bar. This looks just like the reaction when one of the servers asked a newly hired obviously gay guy if he was gay.

>Let's play "Write Your Own Caption and See If It Is Funnier Than Ralph's."Look carefully at the expression on her face.

>But there are so few women in STEM fields. It reminds me of the demand that there be more black judges. But there are far less black attorneys from which to cull. And why are there less black attorneys? Fewer blacks graduate high school, much less college.

>For whatever reason, I made three OOMVO's today. The captions just sort of popped into my head the moment I looked at the images.

Here's mine from the contest...

And #3...

>

I'm worried that I'm gonna get a super judgey coroner.

>

WELL SHIT MOMENTS

The perfect "Well, shit" expression.

Whale, shit.If you can't eat 'em, shit on 'em. Ditto

When that Tylenol you found on the subway turns out not to be Tylenol.

>The recipe said "prick with a fork," but enough about me.

>Oh, me, oh, my...Stunning.You would think those other chimney's would be embarrassed.

> I definitely thought I would have shot the lock off of something by now in my life.