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These are a rustic and simple people; a merry folk with a very plain sense of humor that love peace and quiet and good tilled earth. Nobody else calls them hobbits; they themselves call them that. They are slow to quarrel, and for sport killing nothing that lives. Indeed, they have never fought among themselves, and at no time have hobbits of any kind been warlike. Families for the most part manage their own affairs. Growing food and eating it occupies most of their time. And eat they do, and drink, and laugh deep fruity laughs (especially after dinner, which they have twice a day when they can get it), often and heartily, being fond of simple jests at all times, and of six meals a day (when they can get them). They are easy-going with their children in the matter of sitting up late, especially when there is a chance of getting them a free meal (such as in birthday parties). They have a way of humming softly as they walk along, especially when they are drawing near home at night. With most hobbits it is a supper-song or a bed-song. They seldom sing of anything more terrible than wind or rain. Most of their songs are about things that make them laugh; or about food and drink, of course. They like gardens, and they have a passion for mushrooms surpassing even the greediest likings of Big People. Hobbits as a rule are shy of them, and any others that live beyond the borders (including hobbits), they refer to as Outsiders, and take very little interest in them, considering them dull and uncouth. Maps made in the Shire show mostly white spaces beyond its borders. Most Hobbits regard even rivers and small boats with deep misgivings, and not many of them can swim. They do not like heights, and do not sleep upstairs, even when they have any stairs. Hobbits have rather short memories as a rule. They are hospitable and delight in parties, and in presents, which give away freely and eagerly accept. Indeed, Hobbits give presents to other people on their own birthdays, though not very expensive ones and not always new.

All hobbits can cook, for they begin to learn the art before their letters (which many never reach). As a matter of fact, a love of learning (other than genealogical lore) is far from general among them, though they have a passion for family history, and they are ready to hear again stories that they already know. They will discuss the small doings of their fathers, grandfathers, and great-grandfathers, and remoter cousins to the ninth degree. They concern themselves a good deal with dates and reckon up their relationships with great care. They even draw long and elaborate family-trees with innumerable branches showing the relations of their own system with others. All but Hobbits would find them exceedingly dull. Also, hobbits keep a few words of their own, as well as their own names of months and days. The smoking of pipe-weed (or leaf as they say) they prefer to call it 'art' rather than custom, and their burrows they call smials.

Hobbits come of age at 33. Before that, they are in their tweens (as they say) - the irresponsible twenties between childhood and coming of age. They can often live to be 100 or more years old. Bilbo's at 111 was considered on the old-ish side. Old Took lived 130 years and is presented as the oldest hobbit. A remarkable age even by hobbit standards. Thus it seems that the average lifespan of a hobbit is about 100 to 115 years old.

Hobbits are divided into three somewhat different breeds. The Harfoots, who are browner of skin, smaller, and shorter, and prefer highland and hillsides. They are the most normal and representative variety of Hobbits, and far the most numerous. The Stoors, who are broader and heavier in build, prefer flat lands and riversides. And the Fallohides, who are the least numerous, are fairer of skin and also of hair, and they are taller and slimmer than others. Many Stoors can grow down on their chins, but no Harfoot or Fallohide has any trace of a beard. Hobbit faces are as a rule good-natured rather than beautiful, broad, bright-eyed, red-cheeked, with mouths apt to laughter, and to eating and drinking. They are inclined to be fat in the stomach and do not hurry unnecessarily. They dress in bright colours, being notably fond of yellow and green, and they wear no shoes (apart from the Hobbits of the Eastfarthing who at times wear dwarf-boots in muddy weather) as their feet has tough leathery soles and are clad in a thick hair, much like the hair of their heads, which is short and curly and commonly brown. Speaking of which, golden hair are very rare among hobbits.

Hobbits of the Marish

They are mostly Stoors and dwell in houses. In fact, the practice of building houses rather than Hobbit-holes was said to have begun in the Marish. They retain a number of their own strange words (such as Stoorish) and peculiar names. They are also unusual in that they sometimes wear boots in muddy weather. And folk down there are near the border and are more on their guard; for they get queer folk wandering in these parts at times. But Old Maggot is a terror to trespassers, and keeps ferocious dogs. The Golden Perch, not long away, has a reputation of serving the best beer in the Eastfarthing.

Hobbits of Buckland

They are not very different from the other hobbits of the Four Farthings. Except in one point: they are fond of boats, and some of them can swim. Also, the Bucklanders keep their doors locked after dark, and that is not usual in the Shire. But most of the folk of the old Shire regard them as peculiar, half foreigners so to speak, and it is said that there is Bree-blood in the Brandybucks by all accounts. And in their turn, Bucklanders regard Hobbiton folk as queer. But the hobbits in the Marish are friendly with the Bucklanders, and the authority of the Master of the Hall (as the head of the Brandybuck family is called) is still acknowledged by the farmers between Stock and Rushey. And Old Maggot is a good friend to all the Brandybucks.

Bree-hobbits

The Bree-hobbits are friendly and inquisitive, decent and prosperous, and no more rustic than most of their distant relatives in the Shire. They claim to have been the first actual smokers of pipe-weed. They claim, of course, to have done everything before the people of the Shire, whom they refer to as ''colonists''. In fact, there are many families of hobbits in the Bree-land that claim to be the oldest settlement of Hobbits in the world. They are on friendly terms with the Big Folk (as they call them), minding their own affairs in their own ways, but both rightly regarding themselves as necessary parts of the Bree-folk. They do not themselves travel much, but occasionally they go as far as Buckland, or the Eastfarthing; but the Hobbits of the Shire now seldom visit it. An occasional Bucklander or adventurous Took may come out to the Inn for a night or two, but even that is becoming less and less usual.

Hobbit Folklore

Hobbits have a rich folklore; many fireside-tales and children's stories at home told to youngsters. In the old days hobbits used to go on their travels now and again. Not that many ever came back, and not that all they said was believed. But they have tales of the big folk down away in the Sunlands. Swertings they are called in their tales; and they ride on oliphaunts, 'tis said, when they fight. They put houses and towers on the oliphauntses backs and all, and the oliphaunts throw rocks and trees at one another. There is also an old nursery-rhyme about this animal, though it is commonly supposed to be mythical. Dragons for them are comfortably far-off and therefore legendary. Bilbo and Frodo had often told the story of the three trolls far away; but it was never more than half believed. The stories about the Old Forest, a dark bad place, are a nightmare. The Forest is queer, they say. No one ever has luck in there. Folk get lost in it. People don't go in there. They say the trees do actually move, and can surround strangers and hem them in, and nurses tell old bogey-stories about goblins and wolves and other things of that sort. As sinister a reputation in hobbit-legend as the Old Forest itself have the Barrow-downs. Even in the Shire the rumour of the Barrow-wights of the Barrow-downs beyond the Forest had been heard. But it is not a tale that any hobbit likes to listen to, even by a comfortable fireside far away. The name of Moria is a legend of vague fear even to hobbits, and the name of Mordor even they have heard of, but only in legends of the dark past like a shadow on the borders of old stories; but it was ominous and disquieting. The Last Desert is a distant and likely mythical desert in the far east of Middle-earth, the abode of Were-worms.

Gandalf's Reputation

Hobbits as a rule can only see his jokes and toys. Tales and adventures sprouted up all over the place wherever he went, in the most extraordinary fashion. He is the wandering wizard that gave Old Took a pair of magic diamond studs that fastened themselves and never came undone till ordered, the fellow who used to tell such wonderful tales at parties, about dragons and goblins and giants and the rescue of princesses and the unexpected luck of widows' sons. The man that used to make such particularly excellent fireworks. Gandalf who was responsible for so many quiet lads and lasses going off into the Blue for mad adventures. He used to upset things badly in these parts once upon a time. And after the astonishing disappearance of Bilbo Baggins the blame was mostly laid on Gandalf. He has become rather unpopular. They say he is rather a nuisance and a disturber of the peace. Some people actually accuse him of spiriting Bilbo away, or worse. If you want to know, there was supposed to be a plot between him and Frodo to get hold of his wealth.

Widely Known Events in the Shire

Bilbo's Return

The Bagginses have lived in the neighborhood of The Hill for time out of mind, and people consider them very respectable, not only because most of them are rich, but also because they never have any adventures or do anything unexpected. So when Bilbo came back to Bag End after his adventure his life was not quite the same as it had been. He discovered that he was presumed dead and an auction was going on of his house and possessions. His sudden return created quite a disturbance. He had lost his reputation, and was no longer quite respectable in the Shire. He was in fact held by all the hobbits of the neighborhood to be queer-except by his nephews and nieces on the Took side; but even they were not encouraged in their friendship by their elders. Much talk and false rumors have been circulated about his affairs and doings, and few believe any of his tales. They say his money was got in some strange fashion in foreign parts, and that gold and jewels he buried in the hill of Hobbiton.

Bilbo's 111th Birthday Party

Bilbo threw a grand party for his 111th birthday. During this event he did a vanishing act with his ring and left. He vanished out of thin air, so to speak, and he was never seen by any hobbit in Hobbiton again. This astonishing disappearance of Mr. Bilbo Baggins alarmed or offended most of his relations, and gave the whole Shire something to talk about for many days, and was remembered for a very long time. It has become a fireside-story for young hobbits; and eventually Mad Baggins, who used to vanish with a bang and a flash and reappear with bags of jewels and gold, became a favourite character of legend and still lives on long after all the true events. But the general opinion in the neighborhood is that Bilbo, who had always been rather cracked, had at last gone quite mad, and had run off into the Blue. There he had undoubtedly fallen into a pool or a river and come to a tragic, but hardly an untimely, end.

Frodo and his Affairs

Frodo at once began to carry on Bilbo's reputation for oddity. Some people were rather shocked (until they got used to it) that Frodo kept up the custom of giving Bilbo's Birthday Party year after year. He went tramping all over the Shire with his friends, but more often he wandered further afield by himself, and to the amazement of sensible folk he was sometimes seen far from home walking in the hills and woods under the starlight, and other times talking with the strange wayfarers (mostly dwarves) that began at this time to appear in the Shire. What is more, as time went on, people began to notice that he also showed signs of good 'preservation': outwardly he retained the appearance of a robust and energetic hobbit just out of his tweens. 'Some folk have all the luck,' they said; but it was not until Frodo approached the usually more sober age of fifty that they began to think it queer.

When Frodo was selling Bag End (to the Sackville-Bagginses!) a few held the theory that his money was running out: he was going to live in a quiet way on the proceeds of the sale down in Buckland among his Brandybuck relations. 'As far from the Sackville-Bagginses as may be,' some said. But so firmly fixed has the notion of the immeasurable wealth of the Bagginses of Bag End become that most find this hard to believe, harder than any other reason or unreason that their fancy can suggest: to most it suggests a dark and yet unrevealed plot by Gandalf. Though he kept himself very quiet and did not go about by day, it was well known that he was 'hiding up in the Bag End'. It was generally known that Frodo was going back to live at Crickhollow, and it had been officially announced that Sam was going with him 'to do for Mr. Frodo and look after his bit of garden'.

Hobbit Games

Quoits: a flattish iron or other ring thrown in play to encircle a peg stuck in the ground or to come as close to it as possible, the game so played.

Shooting at the wand: a game in which a narrow slat is used as an archery target.

Bowls: a game in which players rolled or weighted balls along the sward in an effort to bring them near as possible to a stationary ball.

Ninepins: a game played win nine wooden pins at which a ball is bowled to know them down.

The Shire CalendarMonth names

Afteryule (Frery in the Eastfarthing)

Solmath (usually pronounced and sometimes written as Somath)

Rethe

Astron (Chithing in the Eastfarthing)

Thrimidge (often written Thrimich)

Forelithe

Afterlithe

Wedmath

Halimath

Winterfilth

Blotmath (pronounced as Blodmath or Blommath)

Foreyule (Yulemath in the Eastfarthing)

Weekday names

Sterday

Sunday

Monday

Trewsday

Hevensaday (or Hensday)

Mersday

Highday

All 12 months have 30 days each, and Friday (Highday) is the last day of the week, and Saturday (Sterday) corresponds more nearly to our Monday.

Shire-dialect and Common Sayings

Don’t look for trouble and none will look for you!

Handsome is as handsome does - A person's good actions, rather than his outward appeal. Perhaps words of homespun wisdom too that many a mother tries to pass on to her daughters.

Don't get mixed up in the affairs of your betters or you'll land in trouble too big for you

Better mistrust undeserved than rush words

One good turn deserves another

A nice pickle we are all in now

We're in a fix and no mistake

Things look as hopeless as a frost in Spring

I won't have it, and that's flat

Short cuts make long delays

All's well as ends well

Trying to pull the fur off our toes - a hobbit idiom, meaning to give a fright

Strange as news from Bree - saying in the East farthing

News from Bree, and not sure as Shiretalk

Third time pays for all

Filling up the corners - When in that delightful stage after being full of food and drink, but continuing to sip favourite drinks and nibble at favorite dainties.

Somebody's going to catch it hot! - When learning something that makes you angry. For example, Ted Sandyman cutting down trees as he shouldn't.