For the Very First Time: PSL Edition

The adventures of a brave boy trying his first Starbucks.

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The Pumpkin Spice Latte, or PSL, has become an iconic Fall trend. People love to make fun of “basic” girls ordering the infamous drink at Starbucks, and said basics love to embrace this stereotype. I had a realization the other day, I have never had a PSL. I thought that it was only fair for me to try the drink that everybody goes crazy for before I pass judgement and try to understand the hype. Now I didn’t want to do this by myself, so I dragged my friend Chris into the mix (sorry bud) and the results are pretty funny. (This was Chris’s first time drinking anything from Starbucks.)

Photo by Lindsey Law

The First Sip:

Chris: Oh god. This is horrible, it’s so bitter.

Me: Okay but what does it taste like?

Chris: It’s like dark chocolate and like liquid garbage, I don’t even taste pumpkin.

Me: And you’ve never had coffee before?

Chris: I’ve never had coffee in my entire life and this was not a good start.

Photo by Nadine Herman

Sip 2:

Me: Okay you wanna try another sip?

Chris: I didn’t realize there were levels to this.

*Takes another sip*

Chris: It’s not good.

Me: Just describe what it tastes like.

Chris: You know when it’s like a hot summers day and you’re at a baseball game and you order something to drink and it’s so hot it’s like exactly what you wanted?

Me: Why would you want something hot during the summer?

Chris: It was a hypothetical, god. I’m saying in a situation where you get exactly what you wanted this is not it.

Me: Okay but describe the taste.

Chris: It tastes almost like if someone ashed a cigarette in here and then put a lighter under it for a couple minutes.

Photo by Nadine Herman

Sip 3:

Me: Just take me through your thought process.

Chris: One, why am I here? Two, why am I doing this? Three, I don’t feel good. Is there some sort of milk in here? I can taste that, it’s probably the best part of what I’m tasting.

Me: What besides “terrible” and “bitter” do you taste?

Chris: The pumpkin is coming out the more I drink it.

Me: Is it getting better?

Chris: I’m getting used to the taste of garbage in my mouth. I’m coming around I guess you could say, or my tastebuds are just singed at this point.

Me: Okay so maybe it’s an acquired taste?

Chris: Yeah like dumpster diving. Get it? Cause it tastes like garbage.