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"if we tell them the brain is an app maybe they will use it." Anonymous

“So far, about morals, I know only that what is moral is what you feel good after and what is immoral is what you feel bad after “Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it.”
Leo Tolstoy

“Right is right even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong even if everyone is doing it.” Augustine of Hippo

Focusing more on what is honest mindful and right about our lives and behavior sends what is dishonest immoral and wrong in our lives fleeing in despair. I know we should focus on the good but are we pretending there is no bad in our midst? Is the fear of offending anyone keeping us from truth and reality? I can't help but wonder that in all of our thoughts regarding freedom and democracy we have lost the spirit of honesty, mindfulness, and conscience. We all want to belong so much we have given up our right to see any problems in our speech behavior or attitude towards others. There is no amount of rules truths or guidelines that we do not bend in order to fit in or ease our conscience in some way. Whatever we do we can find a reason or excuse for our actions and free ourselves from blame and guilt.

How is it we don't see what is in front of our eyes. The brain washing needs to end and we need to stand up for what is of value to our souls and spirit. We are melting into one huge blob of unthinking creatures and should break away from the brainwashing and wake up to the reality of truth. Are we content to let the family structure dissolve? Is it beneficial to promote the hero as someone who can defeat and crush everyone else? Is control power and strength what we really want or need?

The path we are on focuses on speaking up to others in a belligerent way. It is praiseworthy to knock others down or get revenge. We have leaned how to be the bully in every area of our lives and laugh at the losers who are "Left in our dust". Have we really won? Have we asked what we have won? I see this as mindless thought and actions. It hurts people riles them up to get revenge and hurt back. The end I guess is when the last few of us are left standing. What a dreary world to look forward to. ...continue reading "Right And Wrong"

I was thinking recently and it led to my thoughts of right and wrong and positive and negative actions. We have the freedom to think and act and speak the way we want regardless of the pain of the words. We can dress and be rude to others at will. We can step on others in order to get what we want while disregarding the cries of others. We are losing our humanness in place of power. Money fame and control lend power. The ones wielding the power can manipulate us bend us coerce us or sell us a fairy tale in order to gain and use our trust.

We see and hear bad language, immoral movies, crude dressing on young innocent kids that the surprise or shock factor is gone. We wonder at the crimes committed yet we don't look to ourselves and the world we are creating. It is time to wake up smell the coffee and consider our spiritual self and where it is at. If one wants to fill their minds and brains with gruesome thoughts of all kinds then see it filter throughout society. What we are thinking of is what will be created. It is only a matter of time before killing will be accepted if the person doing it had a "GOOD REASON" to do it, such as revenge. Where is our moral compass?

We have stopped attempting to lift people up but instead have chosen to crush them into the ground. We are all vulnerable. I'm not sending out gloom and doom but truth and reality. Just watch television or read the paper or listen to the number of people or children killed all over the country. Does this bother us because I think it should. It is progressively worse and I feel like we are on a one way train towards a cliff. Enough of us have to get off and stop the train before we all crash.

everyone dies there is no escape and we all accept this. We don't take anything with us except our spirit and or soul. Have we considered in what shape it is in? Have we filled our minds with honesty mindfulness and empathy for self and others? Have we stopped to think of others or excused ourselves of blame? At our death will we be absolved of our wrongdoing? Have we thought of any of it as wrong, immoral or offensive? I feel that it is a crucial time to start recalling what is good and pure in our lives. It is time to defend honesty and stop compromising our values in order to fit in with untruths and unworthy living. There is something to be scared of. It is called the lies and perversions present in our society. Covering it up like it doesn't exist is likely the worse thing to do. Just like the catholic church covered up child abuse with the false belief it was for the benefit of the church, people and humanity. I ask who's betterment. Truth is never a mistake. It cleanses things.

If you think something is wrong perhaps you are right. If you feel uncomfortable about something then maybe you should not do it. If you are tempted when in the presence of some people or places or things perhaps you should avoid it. Wake up and stop pretending you were lulled into something wrong becaiuse it is at that moment you are being lulled into believing you had no choice. You always have a choice and it's better to admit wrong and ask for forgiveness than to lie even to self and add to wrongdoings.

“The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell.” Confucius

“Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are.” Jose Ortega y Gasset

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” Jiddu Krishnamurti

“The first principle of value that we need to rediscover is this: that all reality hinges on moral foundations. In other words, that this is a moral universe, and that there are moral laws of the universe just as abiding as the physical laws." Martin Luther King Jr.

We have the gift of our senses but we don't always use our senses nor attempt to apply our sixth sense.

"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift."

"If I had an hour to solve a problem I'd spend twenty-five minutes thinking about a solution and five minutes thinking about solving it." Einstein

It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity." Albert Einstein

There was such an uproar about birth order that I found it interesting to reason why we can't use our senses. I think as human beings we must categorize everything, find solutions, weigh burdens and assets, compare gains support and advantages and compete against each other constantly. We just can't admit that everyone has their own issues to deal with. That is the truth. It somehow makes it more important if we can convince others that our lot in life is worse or more difficult. This is full of comparisons and competition of all kinds.

I do think it begins at childhood when parents support the ideas of who is bigger stronger faster more intelligent or beautiful than others. It leads to sibling competition which continues throughout our lives. The one with the most money and toys is considered the winner in some cases. Somehow we threw out the attributes and heart of what is important in life. We are left with more stressful things to contend with. None of us are jealous of those people who live together in family structures and live to support each other and remain equal to each other. In some ways this is more relaxing because the competition is taken out of the equation.

Perhaps those are the people we should want to imitate. I understand that no lifestyle is perfect but ways to promote better living is available. I think we might question our own ways of living. How many of us rush to buy the latest technological device? How many of us engage in useless activities on the computer? It is easier to hide secret activities on the computer and live a separate life. It appears to gain us more guilt and worry. We cover that over with more activity and just keep ourselves busy. I know it is important to reflect and I don't always take that time to think but when I do I am never disappointed except to say I question if I wasted my time. How sad is that to feel you have wasted your time when you are thinking about your life.

If we did more thinking rather than business we might understand ourselves better and other people. As it is we are mechanical in our relationships and feel empowered as well as content with the number of people we can reach at the push of a button. I find it overwhelming. Instead of gaining us more time for human interaction it seems we have more time to interact with machines. Does anyone see a problem with this? I am not against technology but without reflection we are being gobbled up and programmed to be robotic. We are almost at the mercy of computers and what they promote and instill in us. To be part of the group you must be involved or you are on the outside looking in and can feel like an outcast if you are younger or old if older. Age has nothing to do with this happening.

Even churches have gotten involved with online services ministries and gospels. If people have no time for church then it will be brought to them in a technological fashion. Are we too busy for the simple exchanges with each other? Are we all considered boring if it is a one on one exchange? Have we lost the art of conversing with others? I know if we can discuss things on line with many people and have the support of others on line then perhaps happiness might be promoted in that fashion. I just don't see it happening when I talk to individual people. They have information but no sense of feeling or mindfulness of the people involved.

I also wonder about our generosity and selfishness. Do we take from each other without thought? Are we really supporting others or just printing from our own script what is expected of us to say? It is like we have all the correct words and fast reactions but is the depth of feeling still there? Is it reaching our hearts before our minds or is it in the mind and spoken via text without any real input from the heart?

I sometimes think we are less concerned with others today even though we have quick access to each other and quick response time. The thinking and reflection states have been rendered inactive. We are using honesty but in a way that hurts others and we don't see it. Things are fast today so what someone says or does for us doesn't register anymore due to our busy life and swiftly moving days. There is more to do say and people to talk to albeit on the technical device of choice. Human free thought and intuition is crushed in some ways. If we can't find some time for free thinking away from the hustle of the crowds we don't even know ourselves.

I suppose it is easy to hide amongst a group of people and easier to refrain from thinking. I don't mean to insult anyone but just observing people and their busy schedules leaves so little time for using our six senses. Have you looked at a flower up close lately or smelled one? Have you sat quietly with a friend and listened with your heart and ears and eyes instead of the messages you read? If we wonder why families are in turmoil and kids hate life and people keep fighting and anger is not under control perhaps we should question what is going on in our own lives.

It appears that we are slowly but gradually being overpowered with technology to the point of disregarding people right next to us. Consumerism is fostered and looking good is exonerated and we can view pictures of becoming more beautiful than we are so they say. Do we need to wake up and put the devices away? We seem to be in a crises over gaining some power over self. The devices own us rather than we own the technology. They control us to the point of ignoring the people in front of us who wait patiently for us to finish until another new interruption occurs. I don't mind waiting but how involved in our conversation can they be if they are constantly returning to their device?

I hope our humanity is not being lost. Instead of cultivating our sixth sense we seem to be losing the five senses we have. Our inner thoughts and spirit is more important than anything. If one tried to ignore their device for a couple of days they might feel renewed like they just woke up to a new world around them. More and more people appear to be sleepwalking and caught in chains with technology. I just throw this out as food for thought. I use technology but I have backed off quite a bit due to the viewing of the world so caught up in a façade of constant involvement in a make believe world taking up their times and thoughts. It gives us little time to interact with those close by who may need our support but we don't have the time or sense awareness to notice.

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it." Albert Einstein
"Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school." Albert Einstein

"The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination." Albert Einstein

"Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts." Albert Einstein

“To me it seems that too many young women of this time share the same creed. 'Live, laugh, love, be nothing but happy, experience everything, et cetera et cetera.' How monotonous, how useless this becomes. What about the honors of Joan of Arc, Beauvoir, Stowe, Xena, Princess Leia, or women that would truly fight for something other than just their own emotions?” Criss Jami

“Everything ritualistic must be strictly avoided, because it immediately turns rotten. Of course a kiss is a ritual too and it isn't rotten, but ritual is permissible only to the extent that it is as genuine as a kiss.” Ludwig Wittgenstein

It was interesting when someone mentioned the rituals we all go through daily without any thought. It really was inspiring because it brought many questions and revelations regarding our life as usual approach. Our repetitive words and actions appear to be mindless and without any depth. It made me wonder how much of my day was actually lived.

Then I received a phone call from a person very close to me, who was concerned about certain areas of her life manifesting in the fashion she wanted them to manifest. She was distraught about the possibility of her strategies taking longer than she wanted. Her frustration appeared out of control yet ringing true for all of us. We have become used to attaining our wants immediately. We can receive an e-mail in seconds, as well as an invitation, announcement notification or doctor results. We can work from home and even run a business on-line without ever meeting the people we sell to. ...continue reading "Rituals"

I always kiss my husband before leaving yet there are times when both of us question the occurrence. Do we appreciate the significance of the gesture or are we performing a ritual without any meaning. So many actions throughout the day are done mindlessly and now I am reflecting on every word and action. It likely is true that when we say how are you doing that it is only a hello. We are not interested I suppose and no one ever responds with anything but good or okay. I love my husband and certainly I need to remember the reasons for our actions so that we can appreciate why we perform the action and how much it means. The effect of special actions should never wear off or lose their meaning.

I find it all a bit frenzied. Although we have more time to ponder, we lose it with our engagement with technology. People are being replaced with glorified machines of all kinds. Our best friends are cell phones, I-pads, computers and other devices. Outings with spouses or friends or even co-workers can't compare to our tech devices. Humans are now in competition with technology which appears at the moment, to be far more interesting.

I agree that the amount of information acquired through the computer is tremendous but how much of the information is irrelevant and not necessarily even worthwhile. Some information is not worth knowing and actually hurts us emotionally and spiritually. Secrecy is easy when using such devices. The age of openness is over. People have their own lives when on the computer.

What is most annoying is the dismissal of real people who are right near us for a small unfeeling device. The majority of people give their attention to the small device enticing them with their pings to respond to some far away person. Technology began as a useful item to support us and offer us closeness to others who were at a distance. Now it is used randomly, without thought or respect for anyone, for the entertainment of the individual.

I am reviewing the fact that we revere technology because it gives us control like nothing else in our lives. We decide if we will respond to this person or that one. We can put someone off in a second, make distant plans quickly, find answers to questions from a machine rather than deal with the wordy response of a human, and not have to listen longer than we want to when we consider it a boring conversation. How much easier it is to put an out of sight person off than a teary eyed or anxious person facing and staring at us.

People have complained to me that their friends are always on the device when in their company. They find it annoying because they made the time to spend with their friend yet felt denied the company of their pal. As close and small as we have made our world, I believe we are further from attachments and intimacy than ever before.

I worry for the children who are perhaps unobserved as carefully by those too busy computing. When one is on the computer, lost in its attraction and entertainment, the world passes by unnoticed. Hours are lost in this scenario which occurs everyday. Our extension of rituals continues with our constant need for devices. We basically don't have to think anymore because there are better minds and people with greater intelligence, or so we surmise, telling us what we should do.

Of course it contradicts our notion of being in control. Maybe the joke is on us. We have button control and information control but decisions of all kinds are made for us everyday. We are constantly influenced by whatever information is sent over our machines. People today have more than soap operas and television. We have a device capable of providing information at any moment of any day and it is small, easy to carry and can be used at any time.

If we believe we have no control then we play and work in a ritualistic manner. Time is irrelevant and decisions are lost. We question how the time slipped away from us. Our ability to change or differ our life's path is unrecognized. Power and independence seem to be lost in the shuffling. Feeling helpless to make a difference we refuse to try. Those who are attempting to escape the clutches of rituals and the attraction and temptation of electronics are waking up to an awareness of the world. It really is crucial to ask ourselves how much of our lives we are actually living and how much is autopilot.

Living is embracing life with attention and allowing your whole being to sense and process all that is around us including the people. Some things are only deduced intuitively. Understanding some natural wonders can't be compared to wordy information. Explaining the sunrise or sunset will never compare to experiencing it. Discussing one's feelings in words can't always measure up to personal involvement with a living person. So much is lost in translation.

Refuse to have your life become a ritual of jobs and demands. Achieving confirmation of our purpose and meaning in life lies within us. Others do not need to confirm our abilities or our worth. No one is like us nor can they do the jobs requested of us to accomplish. We are not at all easy to replace and deep down we know it. The dynamics within us are pure and unique. By taking care of what we can, we allow others to deal with their own share of obligations.

Limiting technology use is crucial to saving our own humanity and self-esteem. Spending so much time on the outskirts of our lives allots us little time for our own close up look at how we make a positive impact. Some rituals are expected, but living with purpose takes courage. It forces us to choose every day. Positive decisions happen when we have all of the facts which comes from being tuned into our lives. Every sense has a vital role in our development.

Hiding behind technology can place our life on hold. I do not want to turn my life over to a machine which shares no human altruistic attributes. I want to live my life rather than view it from a distance. Looking back I want to see and sense emotions intertwined with my experiences even if it means letting go of control a bit. I know the last thing I want to do is to miss living my life, by being too busy organizing and controlling it. I will gain time not lose it as one would anticipate.

Answering a child's simple questions might bring my own childhood to mind. There might be times I envy the young adults who have so much at their hands and support by their sides. I also at times feel sorry for the young adults who miss the emotional aspect of the numerous interactions with people standing beside them. You can't explain the agreeing voice of one with a tear in the corner of their eye. It makes your heart race a bit. Emotions alter people in a profound loving and positive way. Emotions teach and allow a person to pass on the knowledge that quite possible can't be passed on any other way. You learn so much from an encounter you didn't plan but which was planned for you by God. How can a person put that into words? I think that when we give up control, life flows easier and we see beyond the horizon. Of course we must make sure we are not on the device.

"He who becomes the slave of habit, who follows the same routes every day,
who never changes pace, who does not risk and change the color of his clothes,
who does not speak and does not experience dies slowly. He or she who shuns passion, who prefers black on white, dotting ones "it’s" rather than a bundle of emotions, the kind that make your eyes glimmer, that turn a yawn into a smile,
that make the heart pound in the face of mistakes and feelings, dies slowly.
He or she who does not turn things topsy-turvy, who is unhappy at work, who does not risk certainty for uncertainty, to thus follow a dream, those who do not forego sound advice at least once in their lives, die slowly. He who does not travel, who does not read, who does not listen to music, who does not find grace in himself,
she who does not find grace in herself, dies slowly. He who slowly destroys his own self-esteem, who does not allow himself to be helped, who spends days on end complaining about his own bad luck, about the rain that never stops, dies slowly.
He or she who abandon a project before starting it, who fail to ask questions on subjects he doesn't know, he or she who don't reply when they are asked something they do know, die slowly. Let's try and avoid death in small doses, reminding oneself that being alive requires an effort far greater than the simple fact of breathing.
Only a burning patience will lead to the attainment of a splendid happiness.”
― Pablo Neruda

The highest form of intelligence is the ability to observe without evaluating." Jiddu Krishnamurti

“It's funny how, in this journey of life, even though we may begin at different times and places, our paths cross with others so that we may share our love, compassion, observations, and hope. This is a design of God that I appreciate and cherish.” Steve Maraboli

“To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.” Marilyn Vos Savant

Has anyone ever wondered about whether the dream state is real or the waking state in the morning is the true life? It is weird when we have a vivid dream and feel like it actually could have happened. What arouses my curiosity is the fact that we go about our business everyday thinking we are accomplishing so much and living so much. Now I question if we are living at all or simply traveling in an enclosed dream-like state.

So many times it is safer and easier to "get things done." At the end of a day we can show all of our accomplishments. Nobody really cares except us. We feel complete and go to bed and begin again the next day. I question if that is life and what might really be expected of us. From the beginning we are taught to do our jobs, listen, learn and don't waste time. Are we giving any time to reflecting on what we are doing? Many times I feel so caught up in tasks that perhaps what matters most is lost in the multitude of jobs. ...continue reading "Seeing Beyond The Obvious"

As much as we invent more technology, we are further lost in a maze of false reality. We appear to have less time for the meaningful items as we venture forth to complete what we planned to do on any given day. Is completing jobs what it has come down to? Are we any more aware of what we are doing than the hamster in the cage? If we are told to think something over at work, so many of us are uneasy and squirming in our seats. We are likely thinking, we don't have time to just reflect. The scary thing is that maybe that is what we all should be doing.

Is it any wonder that so much pain and hurt has been at the hands of those who don't think about what they are doing. With more gadgets there is less time given to our own brain's ability to work things out with reflection. Our minds also have the added ability to figure in a dose of emotional input which we have not yet been able to insert into a man-made device. Without the human touch, reflection is lost. I know I don't want to have a world run by computers.

Perhaps our reasoning is becoming weaker and our emotions too relaxed. As they say, all of the stimulation on television about hurting others and treating others with disdain appears to be producing a thoughtless breed of people who are more and more robotic. The fascination with technology is taking over every free moment of our time. Less attention is being given to those around us who count for so much more. It is sad to be unable to put a device down in the presence of real people. Now if we ask ourselves about the dream state or the wide awake state we might be unable to distinguish between the two.

It is amusing that humans have the capacity to do so much and care so much yet we take things for granted and destroy the good in so many items and relationships. Our lack of attention may bring down a lot of worthwhile relationships. Sometimes I sense that we must wake ourselves up from a mindless wandering. I don't want to give so much of my attention to trivial tasks, at the expense of soul-searching. It is a unbalancing agitation that makes one sense they have forgotten to do something. In a way we do forget what counts.

Human interactions of empathy kindness and love wipe away anger fear loneliness and distrust. We underestimate the power of a smile or kind word. So much emphasis is placed on what we can do, that we forget how human qualities can accomplish so much more as they move the mind-body and spirit. Focusing more on our souls health perhaps will spill over into our homes', communities' and world's health. If this sounds strange to anyone, probably it is due to the fact that our spiritual needs have long been overlooked.

If we pretend that our waking life is all there is then we are blocking out truth. We may want to see what is in front of us but there is so much more that we have covered our eyes from seeing. Perhaps the fascination with false extraneous objects has clouded our minds. Truth can be found if we look beneath the surface of our lives. Those aha moments lead us to undertaking on a deeper level. What is important becomes more obvious to us. All of the frills and extraneous trappings of our lives fall by the wayside as we view our surroundings with new eyes.

For me it is like waking up. When we go through our day accomplishing tasks without reflection, we are not aware of our lives. No wonder we are shocked at the pace of our lives and the swift passing of our lives. We perhaps are role-playing more than living. Attuning ourselves to our surroundings and becoming aware of everyone and everything is a necessary objective if we are to reach our goals.

Improving our spiritual selves takes time and effort. If we have no time and give it no effort we are locked in a stalemate. Observing life in all of its forms brings enlightenment in every way. We are so much more than the worker at the store or the teacher or hairdresser. None of us is stuck in any form of a name. The power we have is beyond belief. Learning to value what is important is a paramount goal. Once we do this our lives lighten up and we see and understand beyond what our eyes behold. We suddenly become aware of living a more purposeful life.

“What is important is not what you hear said, it's what you observe.” Michael Connelly

“It is only with the heart that one can see clearly.
What is essential is invisible to the eye.” Antoine de Saint-Exupery

“Remember yourself. Deep inside, you have an observer, a constant neutral witness to your posture, gesture, facial expression, breathing, taste, impressions of light and sound. Don't leap to interpret. Just be there and observe.” Jonathan Price

"Ignorant people see life as either existence or non-existence, but wise men see it beyond both existence and non-existence to something that transcends them both; this is an observation of the Middle Way." Lucius Annaeus Senrca

“Have you thought about what it means to be a god?" asked the man. He had a beard and a baseball cap. "It means you give up your mortal existence to become a meme: something that lives forever in people's minds, like the tune of a nursery rhyme. It means that everyone gets to re-create you in their own minds. You barely have your own identity any more. Instead, you're a thousand aspects of what people need you to be. And everyone wants something different from you. Nothing is fixed, nothing is stable.” Neil Gaiman, American Gods

“A very single fact could emerge into many versions of truth,
depends on the number of eyewitnesses and interpretations.” Toba Beta

“The word of God came down to man as rain to soil, and the result was mud, not clear water.” Kim Stanley Robinson

The smallest atom, might be interpreted in a far different way in your review, versus my review. Clearly, most of us have not come to terms with the huge amount of differences of opinion on every available subject. Some of us are super critical, and judge with eagle eyes. It is our job to find mistakes. Others like to slip things by, on the notion of stretching the norms a bit. I suppose, that is where most of our questions find themselves in jeopardy.

Perhaps the clearest folly, is when there is nothing apparent, yet we find an error which is fabricated within our minds. I don't believe we deliberately accuse an innocent person. I think we can't at times, witness and admit honesty in any kind or form. We search for the failure, believing it is there, just not yet discovered. There is a lot of time wasted on useless observing, of innocent facts and people. Many times our distrust, may cause a relationship of one kind or another to falter. We may also ruin the innocent start of a new connection, due to our constant digging and assessment of the facts.

I wonder if we have been trained to disbelieve, until proven correct. Even the most liberal among us, has problems believing in something that appears to be too good to be true. We have become cynical. You have to wonder, if it is due to our societies lack of honesty? Or have most of us been duped so many times by family, friends, neighbors, co-workers and strangers, that we won't immediately warm up to the most sincere person we meet. ...continue reading "Interpretation"

We quickly challenge the store clerk, co-worker, family and friend, yet we can be fooled by the spouse, which renders us defeated and mystified. I would guess, that if our family, friends and co-workers are cheating or lying to us, it is not a far cry to fathom our spouse might be doing the same. Now the saddest happening is the transformation of the person, who gets back up on their feet, after having been hurt. They are tainted from trusting anyone. That is the possible result of the deception.

With so much deception going around, I wonder if that is why we are so negative in our interpretation of others. We are obviously quicker to believe the person meant us harm, rather than believing they had our best interest at heart. It makes sense that the more you suffer deceit, at the hands of those you love, the more guarded you become, especially at the hands of strangers. I still believe it is a tragic situation, to always weigh in on the negative side.

I recall one daughter-in-law buying her mother-in-law a bread maker. The mother-in-law loved homemade bread but hated to cook. The daughter-in-law thought it would be nice if her mother-in-law got to have bread as often as she wanted, rather than just when she got invited to dinner at her son's house. Of course you would think the mother-in-law would have been overjoyed at the present. She was anything but. She thought her daughter-in-law was attempting to give her the brush-off, from the invites to dinner. That was clearly not at all part of the thinking, on the daughter-in-law's repertoire.

It took some time before the issue got resolved, and the relationship was back on track. When the mother-in-law explained how she felt about the gift, her daughter-in-law explained her reasoning about the gift. Both women laughed but learned a life-long lesson. We never really understand why others construe things the way they do. As much as we believe we are helping, we might be surprised to discover we have actually hurt someone, without any intentions of doing so.

Another women was insulted at the house gifts her daughter-in-law gave to her. The woman treasured and craved a less expensive gift, that she could wear, instead of the kitchen utensil that would have alleviated her time. It took years until she finally let out the real truth one day, mostly because of her hurt and anger. The daughter-in-law loved the latest gadgets, and she believed she was helping her mother-in-law to be up to date with technology. The mother-in-law realized her daughter-in-law was not the uncaring person she thought. Her daughter-in-law had actually put a lot of thinking into her gifts. Both women were dismayed, at the total misunderstanding of the situation.

One daughter-in-law was disgusted at her mother-in-law's nature gifts. Although she admitted she admired all of the plants given to her, when she happily placed them in her garden. The daughter-in-law still clung to the belief that a gift was to be an indulgence for her. She did not relish another plant. She was not an outside person, as she put it. Regardless of the cost, she refused to manage any more flowers . After a few years, and numerous hints, a request from the son to his mother was made. After that the mother-in-law began buying more personal items for her daughter-in-law, on any given occasion.

On the surface, all of these stories may appear harmless enough, but in reality they were painful, and long-enduring for the women involved. The women compiled years of resentment and frustration. They even believed the disliked gifts were given on purpose, to cause them misery. In the first place, these women were not totally trusting, because if they had been, they might have been able to accept the gifts in good faith and move on.

The same can happen with words. One person asks for the truth regarding an item of clothing. When they get the actual answer, and they don't like it, resentment enters into the relationship. We must realize if we want honesty, we must be willing to receive any and all answers. Even if we don't like an answer, we must understand that what we believe can be very different from what another thinks. Trusting ourselves first is perhaps the best solution.

I remember a time at a party at my daughter's house. I forgot something and happen to be facing another woman at the party. I frowned as she was finishing up with a story and she reasoned I was not agreeing with her, when she witnessed my frown. As much as I attempted to explain, she wouldn't listen. My mind had been on other things and not her conversation. To this day she likely believes that I didn't like what she said. I can't take the incident back, and I can't get her to have faith in me. All any of us can do, is trust that others have confidence in our honesty.

The way we analyze other people is frightening. More so because if we are not always tuned into what they are saying or doing, we have set the stage for a confrontation. Maybe the social media makes it easier for all of us to get along. I don't regard the media as an honest elucidation, due to the fact that the senses are not more involved. We see words on a page. In a way it takes no courage to print a quick message. It requires no thinking, no facial expression, and a complete disregard of the tone of our voices.

I do participate within the media but I love the human interactions the best. Someone that speaks the correct words, that you want to hear, but expresses a bit of a doubt on their faces, has rendered you some help at times. You have the kindness of their hearts backing you up, and the honesty of their look, which tells you to do something else. There is comfort with a bit of assurance tucked inside. Nobody likes to intentionally hurt another individual. There are times that call for veracity, if one is to make a correct decision. It may require us to leap out of our comfort zone, but when we love and want the best for another, we make the effort.

Interpretations are not reality. They are not truthful nor anything that can hold water. They are misguided understanding, resulting from many uncontrolled conditions. There are times when our own reliance may be off kilter. We might be best to take what we can, from the hints derived from our interactions with others. Wait for a sunnier day to take another look, before making any decisions. Life almost needs to be viewed, in the way a spider sees the world through his many eyes. There is so much to reflect on, and so many views to interpret. We might find we are both correct in our analysis, yet find our conclusions dissimilar. Life is similar to looking through a crystal glass. We all see different versions of the world. We also focus our attention on a variety of items. Nothing is exact, so relying on a clarification might be helpful to us all.

“The context in which a photograph is seen affects the meaning the viewer draws from it.” Stephan Shore

“There is no such thing as objectivity. We are all just interpreting signals from the universe and trying to make sense of them. Dim, shaky, weak, static-y little signals that only hint at the complexity of a universe we cannot begin to understand.” Bones

“Change your thinking, your interpretation of he world, change the way you see! To change the way you see is to change the world.” Lean-Yves Leloup

“Every man, it seems, interprets the world in the light of his habits and desires”
Richard Wright

“The meaning of life is not a search—it is a choice. Meaning is not found in things; meaning is what you make of things. The world means nothing by itself. You give it all the meaning it has. Thus, the meaning of life is a choice you make, not just once, but every waking hour of your day. Life is like art—it is all about interpretation. The moment anything happens to you, you interpret a meaning for it. The meaning you vote for then governs your perception, your thinking, your faith, your choices, your feelings, your behaviors, everything! Whenever you elect a new meaning, this changes everything.” Robert Holden

“Words never change. What changes is how one interprets them.” Marty Rubin

“Anybody can become angry — that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way — that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.” Aristotle

“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.” Ambrose Bierce

I was listening to a young friend talking the other day and couldn't help but smile. His voice which normally had an air of youthful authority, was suddenly direct even and just a tiny bit faster than normal. Of course he had an important message to give so I could see why his words were swift.

What surprised me was how different he sounded. You could hear his maturity in his speech. There was no need for his usual pushy and aggressive attitude. His voice had changed to a deliberate straightforward mode. I smiled just recalling how just a few years had passed and he had definitely matured.

It made me understand how our tone, loudness, tempo, infractions, emphasized letters, drawled words and pitch made any sentence more than a sentence. It was as if it told our thoughts, age dilemma fear and mood. I believe that is why computers and technology in general will never replace the human voice. Somehow feelings, emotions attitudes and thoughts go into our every monologue and spoken interaction. We can't hide our emotions.

Children know immediately when parents are angry about anything. The stern clipped sentences that range a bit louder than normal, at least at the beginning of the episode, tell the kids to scatter. Dad or mom is searching for something or upset about anything and they don't want to be the unwilling victims of a parents' foul mood. ...continue reading "Voice Transformation"

When parents review a bad report card they hesitate and one can envision the anger rising up their necks and into their angry red faces. Of course the child is waiting for the explosion. The parent may begin with an even slow voice but the pace picks up quickly as fast as the loudness increases. Within seconds like a rocket the words tumble out so fast the child is unable to comprehend the meaning that is being delivered. What the child does know is to simply listen and refrain from interruptions. This is accomplished and the child is at times punished grounded and sent to their room.

I remember listening to the arguments between my older brother and our father. Of course my brother had the mouth that would not remain still. As much as I admired his courage, to this day I never understood his inability to learn the importance of silence. I would watch my dad's face sternly focus on my brother while words of wrath tumbled from his mouth. Whenever there was a pause my brother chimed in with some sort of retort then blast off, my dad was furious.

I could observe my brother almost chuckling at the power he had to send his dad to the moon so easily. I on the other hand held my breath and hoped the incident would be short-lived. Otherwise life would be difficult for all of us until the next day. I remember my father's almost breathless words stumbling out. The voice was almost inaudible. My dad's body was always rigid at this point and his neck muscles stood out pulsing. How my brother thought this was funny is beyond my comprehension.

I recall being at the beach one day and watching a family in front of us interact. The young teen was asked to get a drink for his father from the cooler. The boy went to retrieve the item. When he came back his father was enraged. The boy had brought a soda rather than a beer. The man swatted the boy on th back of the head almost sending him crashing to the ground. The man snarled like a dog at his son. I remember not understanding the words but the snarls came through loud and clear. The tone was strong and gruff. I remember glancing up at the man from my head down position. I was afraid to make eye contact with this man. I was young but he instilled fear with his voice. In one quick motion the teen scrambled back to the cooler and grabbed a beer. He handed it to his father having to stretch his arm to be within reach. I couldn't blame the young man because he didn't want another hit on the head.

One day as I walked to school in Boston, I was behind a young mother and her two young girls hardly more than four or five. The mother was in a hurry. Her sturdy fast paced steps, swinging arms, along with her grip on her handbag gave one the impression of someone on a mission. The kids were obviously having trouble keeping up. The woman kept urging them to walk faster and she increased her rate of speed. Her voice was loud and her words were curt.

Inevitably the youngest child slipped and fell on the concrete drawing blood to both knees. The mother was angry and started to scream at her youngest daughter. The crying child immediately clammed up while the older child stop attempting to help her sister to her feet. The three continued their walk with one change. The youngest child was limping and trailing behind. I had to make a turn and lost site of the three individuals. I won't forget the intense look of the mother and her terse words spilling through her clenched teeth. No wonder the child just got to her feet and continued to move on.

I wonder at adults who are parents or work with kids. I hope they realize how much of an impact both good and bad, they have on kids. The impressions they leave are carved into the spirit in a good or detrimental way. Children are the helpless recipients of anger frustration, regret, and much more. They have nowhere to run and no escape. Living in fear for some kids is a normal state of affairs.

We put people in jail for simple infractions yet we allow serious harm to happen to kids before we step in as a society. I will never understand this. At the sake of embarrassing parents, we should come to the aid of families in need. Unless we find the root of problems there will be no remedy. If one requires an antibiotic but is only given cough medicine, the infection continues. Answers at most times are simple.

I know the voice has the power to crush, disintegrate, relieve, or bring comfort and love. The words are not as important as the tone, loudness tempo distinctness emphasis on words and expressions on the face of the person delivering the message. Perhaps we should think about the messages we are sending to our kids and to other people. Probably we never thought about the changes in our voices nor the facial changes and bodily changes expressed by our built up emotions.

After growing up with a multifaceted person I have learned how to read most people. I get a sense of their mood. We all get angry but allowing it to take over our minds is inexcusable. The next time we feel our fury rising, we might think about the changes taking place in our own bodies. Take some deep breaths and count to one hundred if need be. It might help us to better control our own rage. It is always within our power to change things. We simply need to be aware of how we affect others and the impact of our anger. Making happier and brighter days for our own families and those of others is crucial to everyone's well-being.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” Mark Twain

“Don't hold to anger, hurt or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.”
Leo Buscaglia

“If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you're allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.” Shannon Alder

“Your perspective on life comes from the cage you were held captive in.” Shannon Alder

“Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you are.” Cherie Carter Scott

“Before you can live a part of you has to die. You have to let go of what could have been, how you should have acted and what you wish you would have said differently. You have to accept that you can’t change the past experiences, opinions of others at that moment in time or outcomes from their choices or yours. When you finally recognize that truth then you will understand the true meaning of forgiveness of yourself and others. From this point you will finally be free.” Shannon L. Alder

“Do you have agendas for your children that are more important than the children themselves? Lost in the shuffle of uniforms, practices, games, recitals, and performances can be the creative and joyful soul of your child. Watch and listen carefully. Do they have time to daydream? From their dreams will emerge the practices and activities that will make self-discipline as natural as breathing.” William Martin

"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand." Henri Nouwen

"One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren't enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress." Viggo Mortensen

"I believe God is managing affairs and that He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in charge, I believe everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about." Henry Ford

There is so much going on around us constantly that we rarely have time to review what we are thinking saying or doing. There isn't time anymore to worry about what we have concluded at any given moment. As a result we shoot off in various directions, buying items we likely don't want or need and doing things not necessary.

I think we have become trapped in a bizarre notion of keeping up. Today we don't fear so much our ability to have as much money as we doubt our ability to live up to perceptions of who we are and our abilities to accomplish great things. This understandably spills over into every asset of our lives. The result is a genuine misguided attitude of lack.

So many people who are actually well-educated, have good jobs, nice families still have a gloom and doom sense of not making it in the world. They are forever striving to check out the next invention or newest idea on the market. One would think they were giving out prizes for being the first to buy and use the latest project or food product.

I suppose that is why there is so much discussion about healthy food, lifestyle exercise programs and benefits to meditating. Of course I would agree that all of this is worthy and should be looked into. I just have a problem with the way it is being promoted and the negativity surrounding those who are slower to jump on the wagon. ...continue reading "Advice Gone Wild"

Everyone wants healthy food for themselves and their family. We all enjoy exercising and keeping the weight down. The trouble is we don't all have the same kind of stamina after work or before work to put in the effort. Yes we can be called lazy or worse but likely the truth is we have different stresses placed on our shoulders and therefore various amounts of anxiety that eats away at our will power.

I am not searching for excuses but I won't blatantly admonish those who render themselves to the couch upon arriving home. Needless to say that might be the comfort they require at that moment. Somehow without a doubt we all understand the positives of healthy foods and exercise. It is just that sometimes a change in one's schedule takes time and yes some effort which perhaps we can't muster just yet. So many people insult others with their tone of voice. They make statements like, "if you read the statistics you would jump on board right away". They are likely correct but the effort is lacking at the moment.

The weight of bowing to these folks is as strong as the compulsion to buy candy when you are hungry. You want to do it but don't have the stamina. I suppose the crux is the strain and pressure that gets in the way. Even when things are good for us we still need time to adjust our schedule and our time. The more something appears to be a must do, the more we shut down to it. There is already too much on our plates.

I also see a similar happening with observing others houses, kids, games, free time, recreational activities and more. Someone may be content with their habits and lifestyle until they observe another. Suddenly they sense they are doing everything wrong, right down to the way they are diapering the baby. They believe they might be changing the baby too often or not frequently enough. They judge their kids games as above their heads or too easy. The puzzles appear to need more pieces because their kids have outgrown them. They must hurry to buy new ones before the damage is done.

Some people sense their homes are too dirty, too clean, too cluttered too busy or too dull and unattractive for learning. Even moms and dads who devote many hours towards interactions with their kids believe they might not be doing it in the correct way. Perhaps they don't speak to their kids enough, play games with them enough, bring them outside, or spend time building to enhance their kids math skills. If this sounds familiar then maybe it is time to slow down not rev up your wheels.

As one says one or two things never make or break a situation. Missing one or two things is not going to make the difference in your child becoming a superstar or failing. I would be the first to say new inventions and ideas are well worth looking into but leisurely and with caution. Just because it is new does not mean it is the end all be all. If anyone recalls hearing the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water" they will understand that not everything new is necessarily a good or even better thing. Jumping on all that is entering the market is not the way to go. Listening to what others tell you to follow must be taken with a grain of salt.

Our own lives are sometimes speeding along filled with as much fullness as anyone could muster. Has anyone thought of the fact that the more we attempt to fix things that perhaps are not even broken, the more frustrated we become and the more doubt and worry we place on ourselves. of course our clear thinking is then suffering because all we notice is what we are doing wrong. We lose faith in some of our own improvised tactics.

Money can be a strain when one wants to buy the items deemed useful. Probably kids get as much adventure and pleasure and learning out of using sheets and towels to make a fort. If we allowed some creativeness to enter without controlling the toys perhaps we would find our child's own personality venture forward.

I am not concerned with anyone who chooses to follow anything new nor am I against buying the best toys on the market if that is what you can afford. I am opposed to those people who condemn themselves when they can't afford to do the changes physically, mentally or monetarily and then they fret over it. We are making bigger deals out of situations than we need to.

I remember during my teaching years, telling parents to remember that any inner talents their kids possess will come out in due time. You cannot squelch inner qualities. Yes you can aid them but still you can't stop them. At a future date in time they emerge. Parents would be best to lighten their own minds.

The internet allows for us to have too many opinions and way too many ideas. Let's face the facts. It is too much to incorporate. Who is the judge stating that some new idea was better than a previous idea. We get confused because we have too much input and we are on overload. We visit someone and believe they are doing it better right down to the way they have arranged the playroom for better access to the toys. I for one have seen many kids scramble over all kinds of objects to get to toys. That shows their initiative. Maybe we should stop reading everyone else's suggestions and trust our own. Allow our own kids to lead.

There isn't a wrong or right way. There never was. It is based on popularity, newness and time-saving. You can still keep things earthbound and find you have successful children. The first inventions were made by those kids who had nothing more than their imaginations to work with. Have faith in yourself and what you are doing. Have confidence in you and your kids and most definitely love your kids. That is what I would emphasize. Love is like magic. It works every time without fail. That is the key to success at anything.

“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties.”
― Francis Bacon

“Do not ask your children
to strive for extraordinary lives.
Such striving may seem admirable,
but it is the way of foolishness.
Help them instead to find the wonder
and the marvel of an ordinary life.
Show them the joy of tasting
tomatoes, apples and pears.
Show them how to cry
when pets and people die.
Show them the infinite pleasure
in the touch of a hand.
And make the ordinary come alive for them.
The extraordinary will take care of itself.” William Martin

"The system of nature, of which man is a part, tends to be self-balancing, self-adjusting, self-cleansing. Not so with technology." E. F. Schumacher

"If we continue to develop our technology without wisdom or prudence, our servant may prove to be our executioner." Omar N. Bradley

"The world is very different now. For man holds in his mortal hands the power to abolish all forms of human poverty, and all forms of human life." John F. Kennedy

None of us likes to be out of control nor have things out of control. Yet, our technology has totally gotten well beyond the limits. We all fight for power and freedom along with liberty, but perhaps media and technology has deprived us of all of this. I believe it is manipulating, and has lulled us into an addictive type of need and love.

I use the word love because most of us can't spend a long time away from our "Stuff". Anyone with the tiniest bit of techno savvy is seen holding something within their hands. Some people almost appear desperate as they cling to their I-phones, I-pads and whatever. Most people have already inculcated their kids into the habit. A child as young as two might be seen holding a device and pressing buttons.

Can we admit we have gone beyond our limit ? Some people are on computers or some other device right before they go to bed. If one spouse is in the bathroom, they pick their tool up from their nightstand. It can't be far from them in case they get a message of some kind. I wonder at the messages, that always seem to be so important, that they can't let them wait for a better time. There is no privacy. People including bosses, and everyone else, can reach us at any time. Forget about discretion. We can't escape the ever-ending messages coming through. ...continue reading "Addicted To Technology"

Whenever you are in the company of someone who is obsessed with their cell phone, or I pad, or I phone, you find their eyes drifting down to it and then their fingers get busy as they smile. They have totally forgotten who they are physically with, and devote their attention to the device. You, the physically present person, must wait for their return. Some people attempt to hide their focus on their device by softly drifting into another room. It amazes me that they think you don't notice their movements, nor their lack of attention to the present moment with you.

It is so widespread now, that most of us who are not dependent, just get used to waiting, for these habituated people, to finish whatever messages they are receiving. I know when I am in the presence of these users, I don't even mention the interruption anymore. I just wait for the interference to end. I still find it annoying, but it is right up there with the waiting time at the doctor's office. You don't like it, or enjoy it, but there are no alternatives so you accept it.

I love it when some people think, they are covering their dependent behavior. This appears to be even worse. One can believe themselves now, to be unimportant, as well as stupid. They believe they are fooling us. They keep it on their laps at a restaurant, and glance down now and again. Their smile, when they look down is one giveaway. Other people do a chore, while they peek at their device. They let out the dog, and stand outside, viewing and sending messages.

Some people believe falsely of course, that if they share the message with you, that somehow it makes it okay. You might also get the person who confesses they sent a message earlier, and were waiting for the reply they just received. You have to praise the people who excuse themselves formally, to receive or send a text message. They get up, act important, express a serious look on their faces, and proceed to another room for privacy.

It seems like all of this might be a danger to them. Are they paying attention to their world? They might trip and fall as I did when I attempted to dial a phone number while walking. I had seen it done so many times by others, but unfortunately I am not a good candidate, as I missed the end of the sidewalk and fell on the street. Only my ego got hurt.

I haven't mentioned those people who text while driving. I place this right up there with drinking and driving. They are focused on typing and reading. I hate to think about those drivers when I enter my car. I know of one accident in which a young girl blamed it on her shoes rather than admit she was sending a text. Her fine was less.

Media promotes Facebook, and other social communities. Now we can share the food we're making for dinner, and the last time we showered. We have the ability to get one hundred people or more, to commiserate with us, when we are having a bad day. We display the beach area we are visiting, with no care for those who are out of a job or relationship. I know this might be a good thing for some people, but I need more than words on a page.

I need the intimacy of a face, exhibiting care and concern. I like the sound of voices, and seeing expressions change. I like to hear more words than a simple feel better, even if it is only one person, instead of one hundred. Somehow it reaches me more. Some people suffer depression, from all of the wonderful places and things people expound about on Facebook. Your life can appear very dim in comparison. We really shouldn't compare ourselves to anyone.

In actuality, it is an assessment of who can gain more friends. This doesn't appear to be a healthy media device, for a downtrodden individual. Now we might be jealous of many more people, rather than the close friend. Confidence and security become things of the past. Competition reigns even for young girls, who are competing with their faces and bodies. What are we valuing in this world? Are we aware of inner qualities, or is that something we laugh at? Has our virtue and our morals gone AWOL?

The tumultuous disruptions, throughout the world, are now able to touch our children within our homes. People with questionable motives, can enter our once safe environment, and destroy our family. There are deceitful people who are bent on lying, and coercing our children. It is difficult to monitor this. These people don't have to show a face, or it can be a false image. As I already mentioned, faces give emotions.

Another area technology is affecting us, is within the social area of High School. There are students who are now ridiculed, twenty four seven. Being a teen, they have faith in their ability to handle themselves. The pain and crushing of their spirit, may eventually destroy them. Many are left with fear and or anxiety. Confidence is gone, and insecurity is instilled. I ponder about the perpetrators of such deeds. Because they are wounding with a tool type of device, likely they feel less blame. They are not involved in the full fledged pain inflicted, when one sees hears or experiences it.

I am not sure if the wrong doers are aware, that they are hurting real people. If you call somebody a name to their face, and see their reaction, it might well up feelings of sorrow for your action. When such is not the case upon using a machine, one is deprived of observing the actual pain inflicted. It appears that technology use, releases one of blame, and societal constraints and or restrictions. It becomes a covert operation. It is similar to mob rule where no one is at fault, when people or property are injured. Hiding behind a machine, permits freelance slander, manipulation, influence and suffering.

Perhaps we are becoming desensitized, from sensing any remorse, due to our addiction to technology. We have less time for emotions, when we are busy with our fingers tapping devices. Our minds are focused on how well, and how much we can do with these devices. Little time is given to our altruistic nature. Our minds overtake and rule the heart. Some people are proud of the greatest damage they can accomplish. Perhaps they are bullied in other areas of their lives, and find relief in bullying others on-line.

Our machines keep us too busy to reflect, on what we have done wrong. Instead of man creating machines that are more human like, we are transforming into more of a machine like existence. This is not true of everyone, but it certainly requires our heartfelt thought.

Some homes are now quiet after dinner, because even the kids are using a device. Our language is even suffering. People use short words, to convey a message. I find people using less words, and less sensory adjectives, when speaking with or using technology. We have too many notes to send out, and too many people to respond to. With so many friends, can we understand that we are not gaining a close relationship with anyone? Do we care anymore about depth, or quality of love within our lives?

I have noticed our conversations with our spouses, are shorter and curt. I have observed that we all use less of our sense of sight, sound, and sensory. Our hearts are being deprived of compassion, empathy and love. Some things just have to be felt through the heart first. Technology is awesome, but will man misuse it as his reputation proves. What starts off as a good thing, may devour mankind of being humane.

Do we need a law about restricting the use of our devices? Man wants dominance. Now is the time to gain it by turning our technology off when in the presence of physical people. We have the self-control, to restrain their influence and use. As smart and capable as our devices are, they can be monitored, and they do have on and off switches. Let's not willingly turn our command over, to a mindless and heartless device's ability, to overtake our influence and in the process, our humanity.

"Technology is the knack of so arranging the world that we don't have to experience it." Max Frisch

"Soon silence will have passed into legend. Man has turned his back on silence. Day after day he invents machines and devices that increase noise and distract humanity from the essence of life, contemplation, meditation." Jean Arp