Spoof news stories from Friday 16 March 2007

South Bend, IN - Fed up with what it considers an "incomplete" and "misleading" nickname, thousands of Irish-American activists called upon the University of Notre Dame to refrain from using the phrase "Fighting Irish' un...

It has been brought to our attention that before the end of the year Myspace will be but a memory. Due to the number of lawsuits at hand, and the stresses that go along with it, the website will close indefinitely.

FRANKLIN, TENN -- 300 men, claiming to be Christians, met at a shopping mall, of all places, to listen to a lesson that will likely ring home with the "God and guns" mob: Christianity has been "feminized," Jesus is a "wimp&qu...

Washington AC DC - (Ass Press): Outed CIA agent Valerie Plame hit out at the White House fiction factory today during her congressional committee deposition and said that CIA operatives had been gagged during the 2000 presidential election from revea...

Amid the "should I go or should I stay" drama - Simon Cowell of the dreadful, shocking and sometimes also suicidal "American Idols" show has changed his mind and IS STAYING to torment further "future superstars in the making".

MALIBU, CALIFORNIA--(ROCKNOOZ) It maybe bye-bye to reconciliatory ex-husband, Fed-Ex & the kids. In the halls of the posh & pretty Promises Rehab Center in Malibu by the Sea, Springtime has come to the vagina flashin...

BEIJING CHINA: The chief nuclear negotiator for the United Nations, Mohamed ElBaradie says North Korea will "definitely keep its promise" to dismantle its Yongbyon nuclear reactor this time. The communist dictatorship made the promise on th...

The spiralling cost of the 2012 London Olympics has forced the British Olympic Committee (BOC) to rethink its plans with regard to the staging of certain events.
The decision by the International Olympic Committee (IOC) to award the Games to Londo...

Despite the fact that she's been dead for some time and that nothing has happened to change this, Anna Nicole Smith, whose tragic story doesn't need to be recapped here, is once again the top story on Entertainment Tonight.

In a press conference held on the site of the yet to be constructed Al Gore Presidential Library, Mr. Gore took his campaign against global warming to a higher level. Dressed in riding pants, riding boots, a stylishly cut forest green shirt and match...

The hopes of the American Defence Force, some of whom were looking forward to firing indiscriminately at whatever they felt like, have been dealt a severe blow. A coroner has ruled that the killing of Lance Corporal Matty Hull, by a US pilot, was &q...

...leg seeks legal recourse to find a less fake, prosthetic replacement. "The Leg", now being represented by PR guru Max Clifford, has claimed that the situation had become untenable and that it was sadly time to part compa...

A BBC News presenter wrote the headlines herself last night, when she made an astonishing admission 'on air'.
Six O'Clock Newsgirl Sophie Raworth dispensed with the details of the day's death toll in Iraq and the latest on the Cash for Peerages sc...

The much troubled African country may be on its way to economic recovery soon, as the discovery by scientist looking for new water sources has changed the third world area into the next hottest property.

When fetching his brother Pax, Maddox was seen throwing a tantrum (what is it with all these wealthy people) because he had to sit in the back seat of the car instead of sitting up front and driving the car like Britney's "baba".

BAGDAD -- During a recent trip to Tokyo, Vice President Dick Cheney spoke out against those in Congress advocating a withdrawal from Iraq. "I think if we were to do what they are suggesting, all we'll do is validate the al-Qaeda strategy,&...

At a press conference in Stockholm Sweden Lars-Lars Johannsen-Johannsen, Equal Member Of The Nobel Committee With The Responsibility Of Running Meetings. (EMOTNCWTRORM for short) announced that Antonella Barba would be the first recipient of the new...

Obviously coming to University was a fantastic opportunity. I mean, the chance to pay £3,000 for something that cost £1,200 the year before was a chance I had to seize. It was my first step onto the educational ladder, and it was just waiting for me. I am a Law Student and since October 1 st 2006, I have learned some important things that will remain with me for the rest of my life, and I don'...

Heather Mills McCartney, reportedly nervous about her upcoming appearance in the hit series 'Dancing with the Stars' on ABC television, has been cautioned for making unwarranted emergency 999 calls to West Sussex Police asking for the assista...

BBC legend Peter Snow said he was appalled by the revelation of fake election results on the BBC. Snow, who has been in charge of the BBC's swingometer on election nights from the 1960s onwards, put the error down to

Farting! letting rip! Squeezing the cheese! These are all different ways to describe passing wind, a totally natural but sometimes embarrassing bodily function that has been the butt of jokes the world over. Well, it seems no more as John Paul Gaulti...

CBI and its signature trademark Carmen Miranda VII will be heard and seen soon across multiple media outlets from radio,TV,cable,internet,zepplins,plane banners ,billboards and sandwich boards advertizing their latest campaign:...

At the same time that civilised people and their nations are fighting against the spread of radioactive materials and nuclear weapons programs in North Korea and Iran, PM Blair has decided to expand England's Doomsday contribution.

Since US prisons have abandoned education and job training programs for the 2.2 million plus inmates in the corrections system, when an inmate is released chances are Hep C is all he will bring back to his community.

White House Chef, Mammie Jemima has admitted that Mexican president Calderon was correct when he said that the President "probably eats the vegetables" that his Mexican relatives pick in the USA.Bush's Mammie who raised him from infancy...

In a speech before the Bennington Vermont League of Women Voters global warming crusader Mr. Al Gore claimed that Copernicus, Einstein, and Galileo were among the scientific consensus that human were causing global warming.