The Lakers' Ron Artest reacts to the loss to the San Antonio Spurs, 89-88, on Thursday night. HARRY HOW, GETTY IMAGES

Let's see here. Jerry West thinks the Lakers are old. Mitch Kupchak thinks the Lakers might need to make a trade, a move to snap them back to life, you know, a good group goosing?

Magic Johnson agrees. With Kupchak. And probably with West, too.

A source tells ESPN that Ron Artest wants out. Ron Artest tells everyone else that the source and ESPN are full of more byproduct than a hot dog.

Kobe Bryant reminds Pau Gasol to be assertive, and how many 7-foot, two-time NBA champion, four-time NBA All-Stars need to be reminded of that?

Phil Jackson suggests the same thing to Artest, a man who, ironically, once asserted himself into the stands in perhaps the NBA's greatest single act of aggression ever.

Meanwhile, back on the court, the Lakers lose for the sixth time in seven tries against teams with records better than theirs.

All this, keep in mind, is just from the past two weeks.

The Lakers are in turmoil? Trouble? Free fall?

It can't get any worse? Please. These are the Lakers, who, after a championship season of few diva developments, were overdue widespread panic-wise. All they're doing now is trying to rally after falling 25 points behind calamity.

As such, there are still plenty of time-tested headlines waiting to be written, carrying on the Lakers' tradition of never being more than an arm's length from Armageddon ...

Throw D-Fish Back Into D-Lake

Here it is, already February, and there has been frighteningly little consternation over Derek Fisher's advancing age, diminishing skills and, why in God's name is Jackson still playing the gassed-out geezer so much?

A year ago at this time, Fisher clearly was blocking the path Shannon Brown was blazing to NBA superstardom. Turns out Jackson has this hangup about his players being capable of running the offense. Typical coach.

Now would be the prefect time to repeat the phrase that has defined Fisher's second stint with the Lakers, a stint that so far as included two titles: He wouldn't start for any other team in basketball, including the Sparks.

Lakers Urge Lamar

to be More Forceful

Nothing in L.A. has been as predictable during an NBA season than this headline. Well, other than a key Clipper being injured.

People have been telling Lamar Odom he must be more aggressive since his birth, which, of course, came two days after his mother's due date. OK, we don't really know if Odom was born two days late, but he had to be, right? At least?

The conversation about Odom being snubbed as an All-Star is laughable. Yes, this headline hasn't appeared this season because he has been better. But All-Stars are leaders, statistically and practically. Odom might be the greatest follower in NBA history.

This makes him a fantastic teammate but also a frustrating one. All-Star is an individual designation. Odom never does anything for himself; he's always team-first, even to a fault.

So, on Thursday, after learning he had been left off the All-Star roster, Odom expressed his disappointment. He then went out against San Antonio, on national television, and, with two minutes to go in the first half, had attempted all of two shots.

Walton Shooting

Too Much Again

Remember when this claim would cause the temples of Lakers fans to throb like Fred Flintstone's just-hammered thumb? One of the team's most astute passers, Walton gained attention in the past every time he dared to shoot and missed.

The fact he doesn't play much — or hardly at all before Matt Barnes was injured — has greatly diminished Walton's chances of being effective or, in the opinion of some fans, infective.

Lakers Play

With the Intensity

of Pop Rocks

Though this idea has streaked across the landscape at times this season, it hasn't yet been one of the year's dominant themes. Maybe that's because we're immune to it after all these years.

Only in Lakers coverage, coverage from a game against the team with the NBA's best record, a game — once again — played on national TV, could the following line be written without a hint of absurdity:

"They did try much harder than normal..." That's what the Register's Kevin Ding penned in his recap from the loss to the Spurs on Thursday.

No writer knows this team better than Ding, who has been on the Lakers almost as long as Kobe has. The fact he felt compelled to point out some actual observable effort speaks to his experience covering these guys.

It also speaks to what could be to come in this Lakers' season, a season fraught with uneven performances, mounting underachievement and swirling concerns. And that, too, is just from the past two weeks.

More headlines are looming, hovering over the Lakers like the blade of a guillotine. If you think it can't get worse, you haven't read all the obituaries written over the years about a team that dies harder than most do.

User Agreement

Keep it civil and stay on topic. No profanity, vulgarity, racial
slurs or personal attacks. People who harass others or joke about
tragedies will be blocked. By posting your comment, you agree to
allow Orange County Register Communications, Inc. the right to
republish your name and comment in additional Register publications
without any notification or payment.