3.09.2006

Don't Bug Me

CJ Blue's Bug post has brought me to this topic. I wrongly guessed that she ignored the bug (wrong). She send Mr. Hubby to the rescue. At this point in my life, the only person I could send to the Bug Zone would be my 7-year-old daughter. And unless I plan on sticking a $20 bill in her therapy jar for freaking her out about a bug, it's up to me. I've had a few buggy experiences in my life - once long ago and once fairly recently.

The long ago incident pretty much cured me of being afraid of bugs (or so I thought....) At any rate, I lived in Miami, where the bugs are ginormous, so you really can't escape the exposure. SO, I was at a Halloween party (what is it with me and Halloween?), and I was wearing a devil costume, equipped with a leotard and tights and I had to take a pee. So on the pot, leotard and tights around my ankles, I did my thing. Enter giant cockroach (AKA: Palmetto bug). It was crawling up the wall directly in front of me above the toilet paper. My first reaction was to run screaming from the bathroom but (A) that would have put me attempting to run naked with tights around my ankles and (B) I was in the middle of a beer pee, which we all know was not about to stop mid-stream for some measly (okay, HUGE) cockroach. So was forced to sit there and watch it. And freak. And watch. And freak. It eventually disappeared somewhere, which was puzzling as there was no space large enough for it to crawl into, which leads me to believe these suckers can constrict their body size to fit in and out of tiny openings. From that day on, large bugs did not creep me out so much.

My latest adventure occurred when I had to reset a fuse down in my scary basement. Standing next to said fuse box I hear this scratchy, fast crawly noise. I look to my right and discover what appear to me to be tarantulas with antlers. After screaming and running away (and having no electricity for the next two hours), I did call on a friend's husband who came and stood next to these bugs to fix the fuse. I then went and did my research to find out that they are called camel crickets. Ick. This pic is not actual size. The CCs were BIGGER. And why did there have to be 200 of them on the wall in my basement? Of course, the next day the fuse blew again. DAMN. This time I called my "I'm not afraid of anything" girlfriend. Well, she was afraid. Eventually, I had to be the one to stand next to these little suckers (old house + window air conditioners = frequently blown fuses). So I got over the fear. And do you know what? They have now moved to the other side of the basement near the furnace, and they are in little baby form. So when I check the furnace, I just glance over and and grumble. Little buggers.