I sort of promised a birthday story to shrift, but then time kind of got away from me and . . . well . . . (I'm *pretty* sure she wanted a AtS/BtVS/GO/Dogma/HL/SV/XM2/Farscape/SN crossover. I mean, who wouldn't?)

Party Games
by Beth H.
(c) January 3, 2004

Spike: Oi! What's everyone doing sitting around in the dark?

Crowley: Shhhhhh! Not so loud.

Spike: [whispering] Oh, I get it. This is a surprise birthday party for shrift! She'll show up, and somebody'll turn the lights on, and then . . .

Aziraphale: Well . . . er . . . not exactly.

Spike: It's not?

Aziraphale: We had intended something of the kind. We even invited all of her fictional friends, but . . . well, there seems to have been a slight misunderstanding.

Crowley [laughing]: Yeah, I'll say.

Aziraphale: That was not my fault, my dear. I distinctly remember telling the printers to include the fact that it was shrift's birthday on the invitations. I can't be held responsible for the fact that when they arrived, they all seemed to think they'd been invited to participate in an orgy.

Crowley. Whatever you say, angel. Personally, I'm quite pleased with this turn of events. This is my kind of party.

Aziraphale [sniffing]: Yes, well . . . you are a demon, after all.

Metatron: Oh, look, Aziraphale, you don't have to be a demon to enjoy watching humans engage in the activities for which God, in Her wisdom, created them.

Spike: Wait a minute, it's not just humans down there. That's Angel, isn't it? And Lorne. And that kid from Krypton. A blue woman. A blue man . . . what's he doing with that tail, then?

Darius [piously]: I wouldn't have any idea.

Kronos: Right. Don't forget, some of us remember you before the Light Quickening.

Darius [indignantly]: I never used a tail in such a manner!

Kronos: Do you really want the scene to dissolve back to a flashback from 467 A.D.? In front of all these people?

Darius: All right, then. Maybe I do remember using a tail in such a way. Once.