Luxury Fries Holder Feeds Fast Food To Fastidious One-Percenters

Listen up, fast-driving fast food fanatics: the Luxury Potato Holder will keep your fries within easy reach while freeing up your hands for more important things, like counting your money. Yes indeed, one-percenters, when the chips are down the Luxury Potato Holder cheers 'em right back up again!

Replete with real imitation wood, non-slip organic leatherette, polished chromed plastic and bejeweled trim around twin cupholders and cigarette slots, the D.A.D. Front Table prevents those living in the lap of luxury from having stray fries, wayward sesame seeds and assorted drippings end up in their luxurious laps like those awful peasants.

It's not as cheezy as it looks, either, as according to the prominently displayed flowing script logo it's made with “Genuine Parts”... parts of WHAT we have no idea, but at least you know they're genuine. The D.A.D. Front Table can hold two – count 'em, two – Luxury Potato Holders so your trophy wife (or hubby, as the case may be) can enjoy their pommes frites as would Louis XIV, France's legendary Sun King. If driving alone, we suggest installing an open jar of Grey Poupon in one of the cupholders. Why? Just because you can!

The Luxury Potato Holder itself is a giant step up from the cheap red plastic Potato Holders introduced by McDonald's Japan last spring. While undoubtedly handy and convenient, they were made to fit into one of your vehicles existing cupholders. How utterly primitive.

The Luxury Potato Holder, on the other hand, remains hidden from view until needed, at which point it slides out from its housing inside the D.A.D. Front Table like a desktop PC's DVD loader. It's a geek wet dream come true, made especially realistic if you miss the cupholder and splash over-iced Diet Coke all over the interior of your Rolls. Hopefully you won't soak the cigarettes. (via Jonelle Patrick)

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