A Birthday Letter to My Twelve Year Old Daughter

August 14, 2018

Today is Quinn’s 12th Birthday! And it’s Casey’s 38th! Where has the time gone!? Agh! It all just goes by way too quickly! We are having too much fun I guess! To be honest, raising a pre-teen daughter scares me. Raising a pre-teen daughter’s Dad also scares me. But I know that God will see us through this too, just like he always has. I am actually looking forward to the ride! By the way, Quinn was totally ok with me sharing her birthday letter. Who knows maybe it will help guide other girls into Jr. High life as well! Oh to be 12 again…

Btw, this is one of my favorite photos of Quinn. No, it’s not a professional pic and to some its nothing special, but to me it speaks 1,000 words about who my daughter is and I couldn’t be more proud! Fierce and Determined!

Dear Quinn,

Holy Shit Balls! I can’t believe you are 12! I hope that I am ready for this! More importantly I hope that you are ready for this! 365 days from today, you will be a teenager! And unlike your Brother, I have a ton more worries for you! Don’t take that wrong, in the sense that you are a problem child in any way. You are very much the opposite of a problem child. My worries don’t stem from you my Darling, but from the world around you. We have had many talks about this already. I almost think that I have been a little too open and honest with you about most things, but heck, there is no going back now. I do know, that over the next few years we will need to lean on each other more so than we ever have. We are really going to have to show each other a lot of grace.You may be reading this right now thinking that your Mom may have had a little too much wine, but someday it will make perfect sense. Hindsight is sort of cool like that!

Speaking of hindsight, Jr. High is not a walk in the park and I am not just referring to the amount of school work you will have. Things start to get a tad crazy when a bunch of pre-teens start to transition into young adulthood. To be frank, I hated Jr. High! All my friend’s started to have boyfriends, clicks started to form, I didn’t make the invite list of a whole lot of slumber parties and I really kinda disliked myself.All I knew was that I was the weird kid who brought in things like deer skulls and raccoon pelts for show ’n tell for the past six years of our schooling and talked about bear hunting often enough that most boys were scared shitless of me, so I could only imagine what some of those girls thought. I’d love to tell you that it didn’t phase me one bit, but if I am honest, it did. A whole lot. I wanted to be someone else! And I started to look for acceptance in places that probably were not the best.

If I could change one thing about any of that, it would be the last bit about wanting to be someone else! I could have probably mixed things up with my show ’n tell ideas a bit too, but some of those kids needed to see what a boar’s tusk looked like on occasion! My point is, don’t change! No matter how weird you might think you are! Don’t change one bit! You are such an amazing kid! Your independence and fierce determination are such incredible traits to have. Don’t let the cultural stereotypes of what a “girl” should be pursued you in any way! At all! Believe me, you have plenty of years ahead of you to worry about boys and don’t ever worry about whether people like you or not. It will be tough to not get caught up in all the drama of Jr. High. My only advice is to treat others how you would like to be treated. Some friends will come and go, others will stay by your side through it all and many years later. Just don’t fold or bend to please others. Hold your ground and be confident in your values and who you are.

Whether you are a misfit or the center of attention, give it all you’ve got. And just like your Momma, don’t let ANYONE ever tell you that its wrong to be a square peg in a round hole. Those are the types of people who change the world for the better! Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable! Don’t be afraid to take chances and accept change! Most importantly embrace these next few years and trust that the Lord has big plans for you! Your dad and I will always be behind you, 150%!!

Happy 12th Birthday!

I love you beyond words and even though I have to be your Mom first and foremost, you’re also my best friend!