A redneck family from the hills of Arkansas was visiting the city and they were in a mall for the first time in their lives.

The father and son were strolling around while the wife shopped.They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, 'Paw, what's at?'

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I dunno.I ain't never seen anything like that in my entire life, I ain't got noidea'r what it is.

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button.The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room.The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular number above the walls light up sequentially.

They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Then the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24 year-old blonde woman stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, "Boy..................go gitcha momma!!!"

I'm not doing a car Ad here.. but i want you to put your car in this place... and think :-)

Linea Crash Pics. testimonial for being Built Like a TANK

a father, Mother and son Travelling on NH48 in a newly delivered Fiat Linea came face to face with a granite filled TATA Tipper. the tipper crashed into the Linea and Toppled Over it.

Father, Mother and Son Both Got out of the Car Unscatched, but shaken and clicked these pics! now that is a good Advertisement for being 'Built Like a Tank' the father came back to the dealership and Booked another Linea and swears that it was only because of the Tank Like Build Quality he, His wife and his son survived. Linea was a Total Loss and disposed as scrap for below three quarters of a lakh!

Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points.Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.You don't get any points for doing something she expects.Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:***********

SIMPLE DUTIES

You make the bed (+1)You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the rain (+8) But return with Beer (-5)You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)You pummel it with iron rod (+10)

It's her pet (-10)***********

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)College buddy Named Rita (-4)Rita is a dancer (-6)Rita is single and is really beautiful (-80)

***********

HER BIRTHDAY

You forget her birthday (-50000)You take her out to dinner (0)You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)

***********

A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+2)You take her to a movie she likes (+4)You take her to a movie you hate (+6)You take her to a movie you like (-2)It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

COMMUNICATIONWhen she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what lookslike a concerned __expression (0)You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Save our planet... its the only place in the universe that we get chocolates..

Balanced diet is chocolate in both the hands....

"Omnia vincit Amor"

Face it... Fight it

SAMSON :-)

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