The costume my 2-year-old son can’t wear…

As a mother, there are certain holidays and occasions I’m expected to be excited about. Halloween is one of them.

Most parents have had their child’s costume planned out since the August heat became the September winds. But I didn’t.

In fact, even though Halloween is just a few days away, I don’t have costumes for Jason Jr. or Joah. Go ahead; call me a procrastinator and a party pooper. I’m probably both of those things, but even more so I’m cheap.

I look for the free or homemade costumes. When I was growing up, free and homemade were our only options. There was never much planning. My mother put our costumes together on Halloween day. She threw together a costume, handed us a plastic grocery bag and sent us on our way. My poor brother Boshavar was a preacher just about every year.

Most Halloweens will be like that for my children, too. This year, though, I thought it was going to turn out different.

About a month ago, I was at my husband’s flag football game sitting with another wife and her 2-year-old son. Of course, the only topic of discussion between parents in the months of September and October is Halloween.

She asked the million-dollar question: What is your oldest son going as for Halloween?
After I told her I didn’t know, she offered to give Jason Jr. the costume her son wore last year – a monkey costume.

I was ecstatic. On the way home from the game, I told my husband the good news.

“(Jason Jr.) is not dressing up as a monkey,” my husband said. “I will make him a costume myself before I let him dress up as a monkey.”

And then it hit me. My husband was right.

For decades and decades, monkey images and slurs were used to insult and degrade African Americans. I’d heard the jokes; I’d seen the foolish images.

For my husband, a monkey and the “N” word are interchangeable. And even though the costume was free, if I had accepted and let Jason Jr.

wear it, there would’ve been a price to pay.

I don’t know if people would’ve noticed and said things. I don’t know if we’ve come to a day and age where things like this don’t matter.

But I do know that Jason Jr. can’t wear a monkey costume.

And so, with Halloween just a few days away, we’ll probably do as my mother always did – throw something together. And if I can’t find anything else, there’s always the preacher costume.