I’ve come across the word, as you probably have, more than a few times recently. Sounds kinda trendy—like a term someone in-the-know, up-to-date and on-the-cutting-edge would use.

I like to be that ‘someone’, but I’ve learned from experience to check the meaning and appropriate context of a term before acting like its part of my every-day vocabulary. Presumption is dangerous and embarrassment, which usually follows, can be a harsh teacher.

What is a minimalist?

Aminimalist is born either out of an aha moment or necessity.

There comes a moment of realization that the true essence of life—joy, worth, relationship, growth, purpose, health and significance—is NOT found in possessions nor money.

(Remember the Beatles’ “Can’t buy me love”?)

A minimalist determines what is really important, removes what is not necessary (the clutter)to give place to only that which adds value to the true essence of life.

A minimalist asks, “Do I really need this? Does this add value to my life?”

If the answer is yes: a minimalist keeps it and builds a meaningful life with it—for him/her-self and for others. (A minimalist tends to bea giver not a taker.)

If the answer is no: a minimalist simply does without it—it just isn’t necessary for a meaningful life. It doesn’t add value.

Is minimalism really necessary?

Well…that depends.

You don’t have to look far nor wide to see that a majorcomponent of life today is stress. It rears its ugly face every which way you turn.

Look at these statistics.

At least 40% of office workers in America say they are stressed at work. Twenty-five percent identify work as the biggest source of stress in their lives.

It used to be that work was meaningful, satisfying and rewarding.

No more.

Next to work, relationships are the second major cause of stress.

Really not hard to understand, is it.

You’re bombarded all day at work.

You manage—with some difficulty—to keep the pressure in check.

Home at last.

Finally, a respite from stress.

You step through the door—

the kids are yelling and fighting…

the house is in chaos…

And where is your spouse?

on the computer…

totally oblivious to what’s going on!

(How stress-free is that relationship?)

Words are spoken…

and then regretted.

Feelings are hurt…

apologies are made, and accepted.

But the pain remains.

Not far down the list, the fifth major cause of stress is ‘trash talk’.

Negative self-talk, regrets,

deteriorating self-confidence,

unrealistic expectations

add to the already crushing burden.

You want to take your mind off the pressure so you sit down to watch a little T.V.

Annoying in-your-face advertising won’t let you relax.

In 1960, a 1-hour program contained a mere 9 minutes of commercials—just enough time to run to the bathroom and grab a quick snack on the way back.

Today, a 1-hour program has on average 22 minutes of advertising. Late night talk shows run 14 minutes of commercials and anything after that has up to 30 minutes per hour—49% on average!

More stress.

What fuels this stress juggernaut?

In one word…consumerism.

Consumerism is the real life version of the PacMan video game.

Everyone is racing down the money trail gobbling up as many gold coins as possible before the credit monster eats you.

It is the pursuit of ‘the good life’ defined by money and possessions (consumables).

After evaluating 3,000 participants from 79 countries, Jessica Pryce-Jones and her team of researchers compiled the following figures. Pryce-Jones is the author of Happiness at Work and CEO of iOpener.

“The happiest employees are 180% more energized than their less content colleagues, 155% happier with their jobs, 150% happier with life, 108% more engaged and 50% more motivated. Most staggeringly, they are 50% more productive too.”

The researchers found that unhappy workers spent only 40% of their week actually ‘doing their job’, while happy workers were engaged in work-related 80% of their week.

Says Pryce-Jones,

“This means they are putting in only two days a week of real [work], while their happiest colleagues are doing four.”

And, the happiest workers took 66% less sick leave.

“But I don’t feel like smiling,” you say.

Just do it.

It is easier to control your actions than your feelings. Actions are the result or consequence of choice. You act on what you choose.

So, if you choose to smile, a smile will appear on your face, regardless of how you feel.

And if you practice long enough, smiling becomes a habit. You become an expert at it, and you reap its rewards.

Abraham Lincoln remarked, “Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”

“But what’s that got to do with business?” you ask.

A Chinese proverb gives the answer: “A man without a smiling face must not open a shop.”

7 Reasons to Smile

Your smile is the messenger of your goodwill—it brightens the lives of all who see it.

To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl and turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.

When someone is under pressure at work, at home or in the supermarket, your smile helps them realize that all is not hopeless—there is joy in the world.

Your smile enriches those who receive it, without impoverishing you who give it—it costs nothing, but creates much.

Your smile is rest to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad and Nature’s best antidote for trouble.

A smile cannot be bought, begged, borrowed or stolen, for it is of no earthly good to anybody until it is given away.

Nobody needs your smile as much as those who have none left to give—be generous.

(Adapted from How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie)

I am determined to be successful and prosperous.

Seeing the ROI on a smile, I’m on a mission.

I am collecting as many smiles as I can every day.

How?

With a cheery smile, a friendly greeting, a sincere compliment, some light-hearted humor.

The response is delightful, the reward immeasurable.

Shalom.

Challenge: Make it your mission to give away and collect as many smiles as you can every day.

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What does resisting the temptation to eat a marshmallow have to do with the ability to succeed? How important is it to teach our children self-control and the ability to delay gratification?

Some 40 years ago, a psychologist devised an unusual test of self-control. Walter Mischel set a plate with a marshmallow before preschoolers and then told them he had to leave the room for a few minutes. He gave each child a challenge.

If you wait until I return. I will give you another marshmallow. If you just can’t wait, ring this bell and someone will come immediately—but you will have only one marshmallow.

Two-thirds of Mischel’s subjects gave in to the excruciating temptation, rang the bell and ate the marshmallow. Only one out of three mustered enough will-power to delay gratification.

In which group would you have fallen, a mere 4 or 5 years old faced with a mouth-watering delight and no one else in the room except Jiminy Cricket whispering in your ear, “Don’t eat it!”?

Mischel revisited his ‘marshmallow subjects’ as adolescents. The teenagers who had passed ‘The Marshmallow Test’ as preschoolers scored higher on the SAT and displayed a “greater ability to plan, handle stress, respond to reason, exhibit self-control in frustrating situations and concentrate without becoming distracted.” (Source)

Mischel and several colleagues tracked down 59 of the original ‘marshmallow kids’ who were now in their 40s. Were the attributes displayed as successful, high-achieving youth still active as adults?

Amazingly, the character qualities that marked their adolescent years continued into adult life. Those preschoolers who just couldn’t resist the marshmallow “performed more poorly on the self-control task as adults.” Those who were able to delay gratification became successful, well-balanced and happy adults.

The ability to delay gratification has long-term positive consequence.

QUESTION: How can we cultivate the ability to delay gratification in our children?

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All of us want to make a difference. Our sense of worth is validated when we make a difference—in our family, at work, to our friends. The question is how?

The starting point is to focus on being rather than making a difference. Making a difference is not so much our performance as it is the natural out-flow of who we are. Our presence alone is enough to make a difference. Words and actions simply magnify the difference.

Difference springs from a heart that cares. When compassion is deeply rooted in the core of our being, we intuitively express sympathy (identifying with the anxiety or anguish of someone else in their suffering) and empathy (understanding someone else’s plight by sitting where they sit or walking in their shoes). There is no other response to suffering from a heart that cares but compassion.

Compassion will not and cannot be confined to feelings of sympathy and empathy. Through acts of kindness, giving and sharing, compassion seeks practical expression. These are prompted not by pity but by the desire to empower.

A difference is made with small steps. Little things, like a smile, a compliment, a courtesy or a simple “thank you” make a big difference.

Blossom sold vegetables in the Linstead market. She was anything but her namesake when I first met her. Blossom’s constant scowl matched her miserable disposition.

I determined to be the difference. Every time I passed her stall, I greeted Blossom with a smile and a friendly “hello”. Although her produce was not always the best, I purchased “a little something” regularly.

Several months passed before Blossom returned my greeting. With the ice broken, I paused often to chat.

As she perceived my sincere interest, Blossom began to share her story. I had no idea of the hardship she endured as the lone breadwinner for her family of five children. Someone with less character would have buckled under the burden Blossom carried because she loved and cared.

In Blossom, I ‘discovered’ a bloom in a garden of hardship. Little acts of kindness that acknowledge the goodness of others make a big difference.

Mahatma Gandhi said it well, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” I am resolved to be that agent of change. Because I care!

Be the difference — care.

Question: Are you ready to make a difference? Are you ready to BE the difference?

Spread the Message

I have created a t-shirt to inspire others with this simple message. See it here. Purchase one and join me in the movement.

About the photo

Jacqueline Nytepi Kiplimo’s shows compassion that ultimately cost her the race and the $10,000 prize. Hear her tell the full story.

Shalom!

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It is a common tradition as a new year begins to make New Year’s resolutions. According to Wiki-dictionary, these are “promises to do acts of self-improvement or something slightly nice beginning from New Years’s Day.”

I am not making any New Year’s resolution this year, I am serving notice and making a decree!

To serve notice is “to formally or clearly announcing something to someone.” I am announcing to myself and to all who are within the sound of my voice or the reach of my pen that 2016 for me will NOT be a re-run of 2015.

A decree is “an official order that has the force of law.” I am not simply announcing that 2016 for me will not be a re-run of 2015,I am ordering it! It is an official directive backed by the force of law—the law of the Universe, the dictum of heaven and the rule of action.

Audacious, you say? Read on.

I stake my claim

Like a prospector, I stake my claim on 2016. There is gold hidden in the hills and valleys of this coming year! With pan and sluice box, fervor and grit, I will search the streams to discover those hidden gold nuggets and dust—every blessing, treasure and good gift the Almighty, my Father and King, has ordained for me in 2016.

Things must change

For things to change, I must change. I must seethings differently, thinkdifferently,feel differently anddothings differently if Iam to be different in 2016.

I am adjusting my default setting and re-programming my OS (operating system) so that the outcomes I experience in 2016 are different. That involves re-examining my core beliefs about myself.

It involves staying online with the Almighty. He is, after all, the Creator, Designer, Programmer and Webmaster of the Universe.

I leave nothing to chance

I am not leaving anything to chance, nor am I sitting back to let 2016 just happen to me. With due diligence—research, planning, preparation and execution—I am attacking 2016 with a series of pre-emptive strikes.

No matter what the prophets and pundits predict, like David against Goliath, I run at 2016 expecting the giant to fall at my feet, expecting to snatch my victory against whatever odds. I have my sights trained on specific targets and fully expect to score a bullseye in each.

No insanity here

Einstein defined insanity as “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Insanity has no part in my 2016.

I know where I want to go in 2016 and I will figure out how to get there.

More importantly, however: What I get by reaching my destination is not nearly as important as what I become in the process.

Shalom!

Question: Are you making New Year’s Resolutions or serving notice by decree?