From Vietnam, without love : the child brides of China

In the rural mountains of Vietnam, young girls are disappearing from their
homes with increasing regularity. Many turn up across the border, sold as wives
for the price of a buffalo

It was 8pm on a scorching summer night when Tien, a quiet, timid teenager,
left her home in a coastal province of central Vietnam, supposedly to spend the
night at her cousin’s. Or at least, that is what the 16-year-old had told her
family. In fact, she planned to leave the village to escape the pressure on her
to get married. Hoping her cousin would help her find a job, she slipped out
the door.

It was nearly two years before she would return, by then having endured
horrors beyond the imagination of most teenagers. The cousin she had trusted,
rather than finding her a job, had sold her to a human trafficking broker in
China who resold her as a bride. Tien became part of a depressing new
statistic: the growing number of impoverished Vietnamese children being sold
into forced marriages in China.

Tien had realised early on that something was amiss. “I gave her all of my
money and my ID card,” Tien recalls. “She told me, ‘we’re going to find work.
You said you wanted to leave that village so I’m taking you’.” Slave husbands
of Hong Kong: The men who marry into servitude

Her cousin had promised to take her to the big cities in the south, but
instead they headed north, to the capital Hanoi. They switched vehicles in the
capital and Tien fell asleep. When she woke, she was in China, where her cousin
abandoned her after selling her to a trafficking broker.

Tien soon learned the broker had already matched her with a husband. She put
up a fight, refusing to leave the broker’s house for four months, but
eventually gave in, having met a fellow Vietnamese who told her the only way to
escape the country would be to learn Chinese – and that the best way to do so
would be to marry. So she let her broker find her a new match.

A FAMILIAR TALE

Tien’s ordeal is far from unique. Disappearances like hers have become so
frequent in some rural areas of Vietnam many villagers assume that if a girl
has been missing for more than a couple of days she must already be on the
other side of the border.

Official statistics from Vietnam’s Department of General Police show that
between 2011 and 2017, there were 2,700 reported cases of human trafficking,
involving nearly 6,000 victims mainly from poor families in rural areas, with
little access to education or economic opportunities. The official figures are
widely thought to be dwarfed by the number of unreported cases. Police say
selling children as brides is rife in provinces near the border with China and
is on the rise.

In China, where men outnumber women by 34 million – more than the entire
population of Malaysia – websites offer foreign brides to fill the gap. The
service comes at a price, usually somewhere around the 10,000 yuan (US$1,500)
mark.

The stories of the women who end up becoming these brides are nuanced. Some
are lured into China with false promises of jobs and better lives, but end up
forced into marriage or even brothels to become sex slaves. Some are tricked by
someone they trust – a relative, a friend, even sometimes a boyfriend who
promises to marry them, but instead sells them. Some girls are drugged, then
taken across the border.

Other girls are given up voluntarily by families who are made to believe
they will receive a dowry (often “less than the price of a buffalo”, villagers
would say, usually between US$600-US$2,200), but instead find their daughters
have been kidnapped and sold on.

Once the women have been married off, various forces conspire to keep them
in China. Some are effectively imprisoned by their new husbands, others are too
afraid to return as the stigma they bear means they will be unable to marry
again in Vietnam.

Ma Thi Mai, a Hmong woman in her 30s from Sa Pa, an impoverished rural town
in northern Vietnam, was sold by her boyfriend. “After my first husband died, a
man got my number from an acquaintance and tried to reach out to me,” she
recalls.

They soon became infatuated with each other – or so she thought. Within just
two weeks he had asked her to leave her home in the terraced hills of Lao Chai
village to visit his family in Lao Cai, a border city separated from China by a
confluence of two rivers. It is notorious as a crossing point for human
traffickers.

As they crossed the river in the dead of night on a raft, Mai was unaware
they were entering another country. She had never travelled that far from her
hometown.

“I did not know it was China until I saw the signboards in different letters
and the people were speaking in a different language,” Mai says. “He sold me to
a Chinese woman, who then sold me to other men.” The Indonesian child maids of
Hong Kong, Singapore

Mai became a modern-day slave. She was sold and auctioned at least five
times, and was kept constantly on the road. Angry men would threaten and beat
her if she protested or even wept. “They sold me like an animal,” she says.

TRAUMA

Dang Thi Thanh Thuy, a case manager at Hagar International in Vietnam, an
NGO that provides help for women and children who have escaped sexual slavery
and human trafficking, says victims suffer psychological traumas that can scar
them for life.

“The initial responses of women who have been rescued can be either panic or
disassociation, depending on their ways of coping with trauma,” she says. “If
they are frightened or agitated, they might even try to commit suicide, break
down or scream. But if they experience emotional numbness, they feel depressed
and have no motivation to do anything.

“All of these reactions are rooted in their insecurity. They no longer feel
safe and protected.”

Lao Cai is infamous for trafficking. Ethnic minorities and children in Lao
Cai are often the traffickers’ main targets, according to a report by Unicef in
2016.

Domestic violence is common in Lao Cai, even though in many cases the women
there are the main providers for their family. The area is popular with
backpackers and many Hmong women make a living as trekking guides or by selling
souvenirs. Those who can’t speak English and have nothing to sell often survive
by working on farms. Others look north to escape the poor living
conditions.

Mai married her first husband when she was 14. By the time she was sold into
her second marriage – sometime in her mid-20s, she is not sure of exactly when
– she had already had two children.

Since she returned home – she escaped China by flagging down a police car –
she has received neither psychological nor physical support, despite having
reached out to local authorities.

She now spends most of her time toiling in the fields to support her
sons.

Meanwhile, the “boyfriend” who kidnapped her walks around freely, despite
having been reported for the crime. She saw him recently at the local church,
wearing her Hmong xauv necklace.

“His father works for the local government,” she says. “I’m sure if he could
sell me, he must have sold other women too. He was very experienced and knew
what to do.”

“I wish he was in prison, because what he did was like killing me. He sold
me, he stole my stuff. It still hurts so much when you think about it.”

LEFT BEHIND

At a nearby village in Ta Van, clay houses with thatched roofs are clustered
together in the mountains, overlooking beautiful vast swathes of green terraced
fields in the sunny May weather.

There, in their nearly empty, unequipped houses, two mothers, Sung Thi Ku,
54, and Giang Thi Su, 40, count their days waiting for news of their missing
daughters.

Both of Ku’s daughters are in China – though neither has ever told Ku what
they are doing there. Ku believes they were both sold to traffickers after
leaving for China voluntarily, and blames their husbands’ families. “My first
daughter’s husband told her he did not want her any more. His family mistreated
her, and she wanted to leave for China, so she did with her friend,” Ku
says.

In the five years since her eldest daughter left, Ku has heard nothing from
her. Ku’s younger daughter left home at 21, about two and a half years ago.
Soon after the 2018 Vietnamese Lunar New Year, Ku received a call from a
Chinese number. It was her younger daughter.

“She told me to work hard and stay healthy, she was staying in China and she
had a family and a child already,” Ku said.

“She told me she cannot come back to Vietnam.” Trump’s US: tough on
immigration, but on trafficking of Filipinos...

The other mother, Su, is still in contact with the daughter she lost. One
day, her daughter had come home with a group of Chinese people who asked Su for
her daughter’s hand to marry. Su did not know they were human traffickers at
the time, even though things did not feel right.

“They kept touching my daughter’s hair, body, hands,” she recalls.

“They told us to trust them, that we could come with them to China for one
or two days if we wanted.”

Su warned her daughter not to go with the people, but her daughter left
anyway, accompanying the group with a friend and the friend’s father. They
stayed at an inn near the border, and when the friend’s father woke up the next
day the Chinese group had vanished along with the girls and without paying the
dowry. The girls were just 17 years old.

Su’s daughter, now 20, was married to a man whose first wife had died. He
does not allow her to return to Vietnam because he fears she would run away.
She is not even allowed to call.

“I was angry and I cried a lot,” Su says, breaking into tears. “I thought
those people did some magic to my daughter, that is why she did not listen to
me any more.”

Out of the six thousand victims identified by Vietnam’s Department of
General Police, only around 600 have returned to Vietnam.

Among them is Cau, a Hmong student who was kidnapped by the aunt of one of
her friends and taken to China when she was 17. The aunt then sold both Cau and
her own niece to traffickers.

The traffickers took Cau across the country, to Zhejiang where Cau met many
young Vietnamese women, from Son La, Lai Chau, and even her own hometown Mu
Cang Chai, who were eager to meet her.

“I met a 14-year-old girl who had been kidnapped and was married to a
36-year-old man,” Cau recalls. “I asked her how she knew I was in town, she
said her Chinese husband had told her there was a Vietnamese girl who had just
arrived. She also came from Mu Cang Chai, and she told me she missed her
hometown, so she wanted to see me and talk to me.”

After three months, Cau managed to escape the house where she was being kept
and ran to the nearest police station. Her description helped the police to
locate the house where she had been held.

The Chinese traffickers were arrested, but the Vietnamese ones had already
escaped. Her friend is still missing.

SCARRED

Vietnam lacks a comprehensive repatriation mechanism to reintegrate human
trafficking victims into ordinary life. Women who voluntarily went to China –
even those lured under false pretences like the daughters of Ku and Su – are
considered “off record” and do not qualify for any of the state initiatives
offering financial or psychological support. The same is true of those women
who, like Mai, escape their traffickers and return to Vietnam under their own
steam.

Yet these women are in some ways the most vulnerable. Their wounds never
completely heal because of the social stigma and discrimination they may
experience. “In our society, there is still a common response towards human
trafficking: victim-blaming,” says Thuy, the case manager at Hagar. “Many
people still label the victims as ‘bad girls who deserve to be trafficked’, or
‘lazy, greedy people who want to earn money easily’.

“Such reactions exacerbate their past traumas, and can easily traumatise
them again. They come to perceive themselves the way the society does, and
start blaming themselves.”

Back in Hanoi, Tien, now 21, has gone back to school and is starting a new life. When she first returned to the country, neighbours made her feel unwelcome.

“When I got back, I felt like there was a wall in front of me, especially
when I talked to other people,” Tien says. “I was very afraid. I didn’t want to
talk. Many people would make jokes out of my pain and thought it was funny.”
How chance discovery of a Philippine child-sex ring helped FBI close Philippine
sex ring

Her past came back to haunt her. The family in China she had escaped from
recently contacted her to try to persuade her to return. She changed her sim
card, fearing they might one day track her down.

Now she doesn’t tell people she meets about her past; none of her
schoolmates are aware of what happened to her. She has regained her
self-confidence, something she attributes to being encouraged to continue her
studies by the staff at Hagar.

“It feels like a dream I’ve had for so long,” Tien says. “I’ve learned to
forget about my past and feel more integrated into society.”

Tien’s ambition now is to become a social worker, just like the ones who
brought her back to life.