“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.” - Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:in mountain clefts and chasms,loud gush the streamlets,but great rivers flow silently.- Sutta Nipata 3.725

i have never felt this way about a girl before, i mean i met her while i was living at a Wat... just one morning i looked over at her, we were in front of the monks and we made eye contact and i just "knew" i wanted nothing but to spend the rest of my life with this person... we were barely even friends at this point... it scared the hell out of me.. i'm pretty lucky it worked out or else it woulda meant i was some looney or something. but the night before one of the monks told us that we were all together at the temple (i had convinced a group of thai people to do a retreat which is pretty uncommon but maybe they had to show up the white guy i dont know) that we had been brought together because of past kamma and it now its like oh man now one day shes gonna be a naga and try to kill me when i'm on the cusp of nibbana or vice versa (more likely)

thanks everyone

สัพเพ สัตตา สุขีตา โหนตุ

the mountain may be heavy in and of itself, but if you're not trying to carry it it's not heavy to you- Ajaan Suwat

He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them. But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion … ...He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them … he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.John Stuart Mill

"For a disciple who has conviction in the Teacher's message & lives to penetrate it, what accords with the Dhamma is this:'The Blessed One is the Teacher, I am a disciple. He is the one who knows, not I." - MN. 70 Kitagiri Sutta

---The trouble is that you think you have time------Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe------It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---