Beards, Booze and Blues: The Hitchhikers' Guide

Menu

A Reading Rose Part Two

As I arrived at the pub I noted with amusement that a board advertised “Try our Fish straghit from the Carvery” complete with a photo of battered Fish. Why did this amuse me? You may well ask… I made my way past the Smoker’s shelter where a few guys were mertoly puffing away and it would seem that tobacco down in Berkshire has a much Earthier, Herbal aroma to it, dodged a kid playing football and made my entrance. I ordered a pint of the Traditional English Ale andto my surprise it had improved in taste, perhaps a new barrel was on or maybe my previous pint had been the first one pulled off for a while and had been sitting in the line for ages, either way I much preferred the pint this time around. I sat for a short while in the stalls but decided it’d be easier for Kathy to spot if I sat outside. So I sat outside and watched the guy and lad play football, the guy being a little bit tipsy managed to go arse over head and whacked his head on my bench. He seemed ok, pride only damaged it would seem. He later had some middle aged woman throw a barny at him as the football nearly knocked her over. Granted he shouldn’t really be playing in front of the main door, but equally she should be at least five metres from the door if she wants to smoke… a law which is seldom enforced. I got a tap on the shoulder and the familiar voice of Katherine greeted me. We went inside and I bought her a drink we went for dinner and Kathy filled me about her day at work and it surprised me how Screwfix operates. I always assumed it would run a long the lines of B & Q or Homebase, but it is more the DIY equivalent of Argos (the Greek god of pointless queuing) with a trade and domestic counter. We settled on having the Carvery as I was not convinced by seeing three batter fish drying out under the Carvery lights which was as good as Carverys go, the Chef was rather amusing which makes a change to a lot of the ones I’ve seen in chain pubs. It was lovely seeing her again and I’d forgotten how pretty she is, I know I’ve seen lots of photographs of her but they never quite do people justice do they? She commented to me that I’d lost a lot of weight and she didn’t recognised me at first, a nice comment which made me feel a little better about having to force myself into my whistle and flute, perhaps in the same way as a girdle or corset, my suit trousers were keeping it all at bay. We talked about a lot of things, including her plans to prepare a staff party for her friend’s birthday. If you wanted to characterise use from sitcoms I’d say she was something of a Penny to my Sheldon (only with more warmth), after dinner we retired back to the bar and had another drink. Kathy stuck to soft drinks and I returned to the Bombardier Burning Gold, I like to keep my taste buds on their toes. We discussed many things but mainly talked about our pets. She has a West Highland Terrier called Rosie, who it appears is something of a fan of the TV show MacGyver… not you didn’t read that wrong. Apparently whenever it is on it pacifies her a bit and Kathy evidently spotting that I was raising an eyebrow at this statement showed me an photo of Rosie glued to the screen watching MacGyver. We chatted for about half an hour before Kathy told me she needed to return home to have a bath and get things sorted for the morning. I bid her goodnight and decided upon a final night cap before returning to my digs. I finished as I started with a pint of the Traditional English Ale and read a little bit of my book, but the late night chorus from the bar was getting grating so I returned to my digs and curled up in bed with a cup of tea in the company of Inspector Maigret.