In Defense Of Vaping

It has come to my attention that there are some people in the world that have a vendetta against vaping. They don’t like the water vapor that fills the room and claim that it makes them cough (a claim I find rather unconvincing.)

But personally, I’m all about dat vape life. Vaping isn’t just a hobby, it’s a lifestyle – a culture, if you will. Vape culture is a big part of my life. Why, you ask? Only because it’s the most enjoyable bad habit you could ever pick up.

When I’m reading a book, I vape - because it helps me concentrate. When I’m playing guitar or writing a song, I vape - because it gets my creative juices flowing. When I’m hanging out with friends over a beer or glass of wine, I vape - because it enhances the moment and prolongs conversation.

But I’m not the only one that loves vaping. Here are some facts about the history of vapology. FACT: George Washington was vaping when he won the American Revolution. FACT: Thomas Jefferson was vaping when he wrote The Declaration Of Independence. FACT: Martin Luther King Jr. was vaping just moments before delivering his famous “I Have A Dream” speech.

FACT: Vaping raises IQ by 20 points within the first 10 seconds of inhaling. FACT: Vaping on a regular basis increases lifespan by exactly 31 years and increases your chances of being accepted into an Ivy League college by %100. Boom. Mic drop. Score - Vape-ees: 1, Non vaping losers: 0. We win. Don’t like it? Cry me a river.