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Bowling Jokes And Humor

It is time for bowling jokes and humor. Although bowlingball.com presents many articles with instructional content, product features, or other industry related topics, I thought it might be fun to just post an article about bowling jokes and humor.

We invite you to share your favorite joke or humorous story related to bowling with our community friends so perhaps we all can enjoy a few good smiles or laughs.

Not being much of a comedian myself and one with little recall for jokes, I thought I would get us started by sharing a quick bowling joke or two and then follow up with a personal humorous story dating back to about 1970, which actually happened to me first hand.

First, a joke: "I go bowling at least once a week in league to make sure I still hate the game."

Not so good? OK, one more quick joke: "If you can't hear a pin drop, then something is definitely wrong with your bowling."

Let's move on now to my true story:

As a rookie on the PBA Tour, I had only bowled in a couple of tournament and was trying to make the match play finals portion of a PBA National Tour event. Once a bowler such as myself who was trying to break in to Tour life qualified for the top 24 match play finals, it meant that I could roll one game against 34 of the top players of the time. Qualifying for the finals was a very important step for me but I had yet to get it done.

The Tour traveled to the Pacific Northwest for the summer swing and the 2nd event was hosted in Portland, Oregon. In those days, we rolled 18 qualifying games in regular Tour events in 3 six-game blocks. The cut was made to 24 bowlers advancing into the match play portion of the event. There was no TV, by the way, in those days other than for 12 events on the Winter Tour. Where we finished after the 24 match play games in the finals is where we were placed at the tournament’s end and paid accordingly.

As luck would have it for me, I managed to bowl well enough to make the leader board after the first round of qualifying games. I stayed on the board after the 2nd round later in the first day of competition.

On the 2nd day of qualifying, I bowled adequately enough in the first five games of the 3rd and final qualifying block to be “in the hunt” to make the finals. Truthfully, I was very nervous and was trying to make as many good shots I could so I did not “choke away” the opportunity.

In fact, as the leader board was updated (it was updated after each game of the last qualifying squad and during the last couple of games of that squad), I noticed the estimated score for the last spot in the top 24 finals required me to to get a spare or a strike in each of the last two frames of my 18th and last qualifying game to stay ahead of the “estimated number” to qualify for the finals.

Now I was getting really nervous and in my attempt to break through and qualify for the match play rounds I so desperately wanted to participate in since joining the Tour. Honestly, I had to tell myself while sitting on the bowling bench staring at my bowling shoes to not squeeze my bowling ball so hard so that I could let it go. I was that nervous - one never forgets.

I managed to get a strike in the ninth frame and now the drama built - I only needed a mark, a spare or a strike, in the tenth and final frame to qualify for the finals. I could not swallow easily while sitting and waiting for my turn to bowl.

What do you think happened? I left the one spare which, in those days, I feared most - the ten pin! That's right, the ten pin was left standing after my first ball and I was directly faced with picking it up to qualify.

Being a right handed player, I dreaded the prospect of picking up the ten pin to attain my goal. Well, I can tell you “I swallowed the apple” and missed the spare on the inside as I watched my bowling ball hook helplessly away from the ten pin.

I was pretty shook up after making that errant delivery, to say the least, and wanted to crawl into a hole in the floor and hide. I was devastated and embarrassed as many of my fellow pros witnessed my collapse. I do not think I had ever felt so low after missing any spare.

After weighing in my bowling ball equipment (which was the requirement for all “cashers” in the tournament) I quietly headed out of the bowling center to be alone. I felt a few pats on the back and heard a few comments such as “shake it off” or “get ‘em next week.”

My head was down so I honestly do not remember who made those comments. I just walked out of the bowling center quickly and found myself walking to the cocktail lounge located in the mall area just outside the bowling center.

I sat on the corner bar stool away from anyone else in the bar and just sulked feeling sorry for myself and worse. I cannot share with you the names I privately called myself. When ordering a beverage, I could barely get the words out to the bartender.

After a couple of minutes alone sitting and privately feeling like I had lost my one chance at bowling in the finals and like a total loser doubting if I would ever be able to get the job done in the future, I heard someone mentioned my name as he approached where I was seated.

I looked up and it was Billy Hardwick. Billy was an established Tour Star and an eventual PBA Hall of Fame inductee. Billy was a two-time PBA Player of the Year in the decade of the 1960’s and was actually the first professional bowler athlete to get a national TV commercial endorsing a famous Beer Company.

Billy knew how to win and I was certain he was going to offer some words of solace to help me through my depressed state of mind. I quickly prepared myself to listen to what he might say. Billy sat down next to me, order two beers, and then went on to speak to me.

Billy told me that “I saw what happened in there and I understand how I feel because I had gone through the exact same thing myself during my rookie year.” He went on to say “he needed a mark in the final frame of qualifying just like me to make his first match play finals.” I said to Billy - “really?”

Billy then went on to say “and I left the ten pin standing in my final frame just like you did today.” Again, I said to Billy again - “really?”

Then I looked keenly into Billy’s eyes as I mustered up enough guts to say “oh, and you missed yours too?”

Billy promptly placed his hand on my back,smiled, and said confidently “no Rich, I made mine!!!”

Billy got me good with that zinger. It did break the tension and made me smile. I realized after that to not take things so dramatically hard and that better days were ahead. But the joke was on me. LOL

Well, folks, how about you? Do you have an amusing story you wish to briefly share? How about a bowling joke? Maybe you have a humorous anecdote involving bowling you can pass along.

Please feel free to make your comments and let’s see how many smiles or chuckles we can share with one another. The only thing we ask is to make sure you DO NOT use profanity or off-color remarks, of course.

Try to keep your comment as brief as possible because we are restricted by our provider as to how many words are allowed in the comment section below.

I look forward to reading forthcoming comments. Thanks for allowing me to share my meager attempt at a humorous story. Your bowling jokes and humor are certainly most welcomed.