I grow things, I ride things, I bake things, I can things, I sew things and I make things. Sit with me on Aunt Mildred's Porch to witness this crazy journey I call my life and share the fun, laughter and utter foolishness that I come across from day to day. If you don't want to see pictures of my butt, you should just move along.

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Thursday, August 19, 2010

What's In YOUR Wallet?

I mean, what's in your car? I call my Jeep The General (you know, general purpose vehicle is where Jeep gets its name), so don't think I've lost my mind when I refer to it. It's not like it's my pet name for k-ster or anything.

So, I looked around today and thought about how ridiculous it is inside The General. And I'm curious to know if I'm alone in this madness or if everyone keeps everything and the kitchen sink in their vehicles. It clearly is a very slow news day in my realm.

Taking a look around, front to back, this is what I found:

Front: a couple of water bottles and a backpack. Not unusual.

Back seat: a saddle, two fold up chairs that you put in a bag, bags for the grocery store, cans of cat food that fell out of a bag, random articles of clothing, lia sophia jewelry catalogs, my fake purse(for when I go into a store where just carrying your keys in your hand seems uncouth, so I bring out the fake purse and stick my keys in the them and I look more sophisticated).

Back storage area: a folded 6 foot table, a milk crate with an afghan and jumper cables, my riding helmet and boots, a bag with clothes for riding in the winter, my gym bag, my pilates mat, a folded mat to keep dirt off the seat when I have something messy to transport, a sign that says Vote For Education because I took it out of the ground at the car wash and haven't brought it in yet.

What? This isn't normal???? Just think of what I am prepared to do at a moment's notice:

I could ride a horse (I really have all but the horse in there but the saddle has now been moved to the barn where I ride- for the moment).

I could set up a table and 2 chairs and we could eat cat food (OMG this reminds me of the district meeting we had two years ago between the towns over the school budget and this dramatic old lady got up and cried about how if she had to pay $30 more per year for taxes, she'd have to eat CAT FOOD).

I could clothe you from head to foot with everything but underwear.

I could give your battery a jump.

I could sit in a chair and have an afghan on me while I'm sitting by the sign to support education.

I could give you basic first aid, bandaids, etc., and bring you to if you faint. I could also play you some music, including several Christmas albums, while drying you off with a Shamwow; I'd be able to supply several people with various baseball caps from the Cape and TN; at least 3 of you could borrow umbrellas and one bright yellow dollar store poncho; Any number of you could have your eyeglasses cleaned as well as your hands wiped off and at least 8 of you could go grocery shopping and never require paper or plastic.

Oddly, I have no music in The General. I don't have a tape player (8 track or otherwise) and since my old cars only had tape players, I never brought CDs into the car and never think to do it in The General. Oh, I do have the WICKED cd, so that was a lie. BUt what to do with all of those tapes????

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