Mar. 8th, 2010

It is hard to be a good Republican because somehow, you have to concurrently believe;

- that Jesus loves you and shares your deep hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

- that the U.S. should get out of the UN, and our highest national priority was to enforce UN resolutions against evil doers.

- that a woman can't be trusted with her own body and multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all humankind without any regulation.

- that being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio talk-show host. Then it's an illness and your prayers are needed for recovery.

- that the best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, pray for them, then vote against veterans benefits and increased combat pay.

- that if condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't be having sex anymore.

- that good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our allies, and then demand money and cooperation.

- that HMOs and insurance companies make profits and have the best interest of the public at heart.

- that global warming and smoking linked to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

- that the government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which should include "banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet."

- that trade with Cuba is wrong because they are communists, but trade with China is vital to a "spirit of international harmony."

- that it's OK to spend like there is no tomorrow and run up deficits that your grandchildren won't be able to pay, while at the same refunding as much tax money as possible to rich people who don't need it.

This illogical behavior can take a toll on any mind. So if a friend of yours has been acting a bit dazed and confused lately, be nice: he or she may be a Republican!