By joining our community you will have the ability to post topics and access other forums reserved for members. Registration is quick, simple and absolutely free. Join our community today by clicking here.

I got the "I'm dying please help me find a place for my money" scam from a Mrs. . I decided to play it a la "The Graduate" and throw in as many references to the film and its soundtrack as I could**.

Here's my favorite exchange so far:

Me:

Quote:

Where I live in California, we have a saying that comes from the mountain people who lived in the Northern mountains, and I'd like to say it for you: Here's to you Mrs. Robinson, Jesus loves you more than you will know. Coocoocachoo. This part means don't let the evil spirits get you -- so you say "coocoocachoo" to scare them off.

Mrs. Robinson:

Quote:

coocoocachoo!!!! did i say that well? my dear,am so glad i am surounded by somuch love.thank you.my be god is started to do his work again.am a bit stronger than i used to be.all thanks to the lord for your prayers and wishes.stay blessed my dear.you have not told me about where you are with the security company. till i here from you my dear,stay blessed.

**If this doesn't make any sense to you, please direct your browser to Netflix for the movie and then iTunes for the soundtrack -- you'll be glad you did!

<br>Make sure you can get Mr Gladstone and the Taft Hotel in the bait somewhere.

_________________£1,052,334.30 (=US$2,121,125.60) lads fake cheques out of circulation (at 11/6/2008)
x135 (at 26/9/2008) x138
"i see your not interested in the transaction but catching your fun, calling names and my muckery of me." - Usman Bello
"You need to visit a good psychiatrist very fast, because some nuts are missing from your brain." - PROF.SOLUDO
"...it is very important you forward the your cycling proficiency certificate which by right belongs to you." - Prof Charles Soludo.
"note i can still change my mind to blow you off and whenever" - T0ny 'The Killerman' Erik
YOUR GENERATION WILL ROAST IN ABSTRACT POVERTY,BASTARD IDIOT -Daniel Mensah

JMRazorBaiting Guru

Joined: 03 Mar 2006
Posts: 7103
Location: Yes

Posted:
Wed Mar 07, 2007 8:34 pm

Nice ideas! I love trying to turn her into a seductress (as she describes her various IV drips and repeated drug-induced comas!).

Can I suggest you use the lines "We'd like to know a little bit about your for our files. We'd like to help you learn to help yourself."

_________________"THAT IS ALL I COULD ADVICE YOU DO, BUT IF YOU INSIST ON ME KILLING YOU, WELL THE CHOICE IS ALL YOURS."
"KNOWING US BTCI BANK, KNOWING YOU [email protected] PARTRIDG3, A-HA,"
" why are you so nervous and easy upset, may be it was this reason of vestation that your wife left you, it might not be really for sexual matters,"
"you could have just walk away and neglect my proposal rather than bringing me to the center of the sea and abandoning me here."

asiaguyElite Baiter

Joined: 14 Apr 2006
Posts: 1180
Location: Me Luv U Long Time

Posted:
Thu Mar 08, 2007 12:04 pm

And..."heaven holds a place for those who pray...Hey, hey, hey."

_________________You must be stupied and mad you bastard full she goat. (Charles Soludo)
Madam, is not your signature for Christ sack (Prince Tony Yobo William)
WOMAN YOU SMELL UR ASS SOON AND DIE LIKE RAT WAIT THERE (Barrister John Ola)
I will cock you in a bottle and add peper to your eyes while you will die (My lost love Lad...Morgan)
fuck off and never contact me any more get this insult to your entire family (Barrister Philip Nowoke after 9 futile trips to WU)
I don't know how you think they will be liking your asshole (Paul Mbecki - banker Lad)

_________________"I was at the Abuja Embassy Today, the Security guards say that the is no Mr. Bryan Adams working with them at either the lagos or abuja embassy. and did not let me in." - Efosa Erhabor - (Accra to Abuja)
"We stayed there for two days hopping to get any of you" - Pastor Collins
"i will report to webmaster,abuse and the police hold and see, .....go to hell and rust in there bastard........bitch" - Steve Wright
"This office will like to inform you that your winnings have been forfieted due to acts unbecoming of a humanbeing." - The Alpha Lottery
"A MAD MAN WILL PREGNANT YOUR JUNIOR SISTER AND THE BABY WILL BE A MAD BASTARD LIKE YOU." - Mahadul Usman
"I AM NOT A FOLL LET ME BE BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST AN ANIMAL TO DEAL WITH" - Tunji Adams
x5

Clint-ThrustNot quite a Newb

Joined: 13 Feb 2007
Posts: 72
Location: Planet Earth..I think

Posted:
Thu Mar 08, 2007 2:49 pm

Tell her your financial advisor is Joe DiMaggio and you can't locate him at the moment.

Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio.
A nation turns its lonely eyes to you (ooo ooo ooo).

_________________"I have contacted some few artist in Nigeria and i want to know the creteria that you required for an individual artist.
Give me break down and step by step on what to do. I want to be your representatives in Nigeria" - Ever So Helpful George

"Spring my liked season, I likes to look, how the nature comes to life after winter.
As the first kidneys on trees are dismissed..." - Svetlana

YastrebDemented Opportunist

Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 15093
Location: Leading my wolf pack

Posted:
Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:16 pm

Bring politics into it as the Democrats discuss the choice of their Presidential contender - you're "going to the candidates' debate".

[Assuming that you're American...]

_________________I will heed the advice of a polite horse for it is written that more flies are caught with honey than vinegar... although assault carbines and monstrous wolves are still fun.

You said it very well indeed! I'll say it twice: Coocoocachoo,
coocoocachoo! In these dark times Mrs. Robinson, I always remind myself that Heaven holds a place for those who pray. Hey, do you think that maybe if you pray hard enough, that God might hold onto your place a little longer and keep you here on Earth? I hope so.

Mrs. R:

Quote:

my darling,how are you? and how is the family? its been a while since i toook so much time to talk to you.and i must thank you for all those words of hope and courage you kept sending me while i was unable to reply.i pray the good lord continues to bless you for me.i said those words,and i keep saying them everytime i have the strenght to do so{coocoocachoo}.i must also tell you,that you have always been a blessing to me eversince i meet you.i a short while of knowing you,you have made me realise that when there is life,there is hope.sometimes,i wish you where here to say those words you mail to me.i know with the lord,nothing is realy impossible.i hope the lord showers you with such love you show me.i pray you keep dwelling with him,and his blessings will dwell with you.i have to let you know i feel blessed and you make me glad always.god bless you my darling.

Get a phone number - you tried to call her but only heard The Sound of Silence.

_________________--

x2

"you have luke worm in your brain" - Ekaetta Bello
"invite me to your country and let me clearify your legitimacy asshole" - Mose5 Uzem3
"the transfer was not authorized due to my persistent double mind" - Clement Wank
"this is not the time to play planks" - Mack Anthony

He just seems to have stuck your small S & G bit in the middle of his scripted reply.

_________________£1,052,334.30 (=US$2,121,125.60) lads fake cheques out of circulation (at 11/6/2008)
x135 (at 26/9/2008) x138
"i see your not interested in the transaction but catching your fun, calling names and my muckery of me." - Usman Bello
"You need to visit a good psychiatrist very fast, because some nuts are missing from your brain." - PROF.SOLUDO
"...it is very important you forward the your cycling proficiency certificate which by right belongs to you." - Prof Charles Soludo.
"note i can still change my mind to blow you off and whenever" - T0ny 'The Killerman' Erik
YOUR GENERATION WILL ROAST IN ABSTRACT POVERTY,BASTARD IDIOT -Daniel Mensah

Tell her that "Last Night I Had the Strangest Dream" it was "Wednesday Morning, 3 A.M." you were on "Bleecker Street" and saw a "Sparrow". The sparrow said "Go Tell It on the Mountain"

So you went and said "I Am a Rock" ,you felt "Blessed" so much so that all the "Leaves that are Green" looked beautiful, but all you heard was the ""The Sound of Silence", but you felt overjoyed that you were"Somewhere They Can't Find Me" On the way down the mountain you saw "Richard Cory" who is a "A Most Peculiar Man", he spends his life as a "Roving Gambler", who thinks politics is corrupt and that the "Blues Run The Game"

On the way home it got "Cloudy" and that the clouds made "Patterns", on the way home you stopped at "Scarborough Fair" and rode on the "The Big Bright Green Pleasure Machine", after stopping to buy some "Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme" you were glad to be "Homeward Bound" you even made it home in time for the "7 O'Clock News" even though there was a traffic jam on the "The 59th Street Bridge ".

You love spring as it reminds you of a saying an older woman once told you "April Come She Will" , you think this older lady now resides in "The Folks" home and that moving there had "A Great Effect" on her even though when she left all her neighbours were saying "Whew".

Next week you are going to be "At the Zoo" with "Old Friends", you'll take some nuts to feed the monkeys and that you'll buy them from the mom and pop store as their motto is "Keep the Customer Satisfied" . It's run by a lady called "Cecilia" who normally works "Late In The Evening" .She keeps telling you to read a book called "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover", though sometimes you think she's "Still Crazy After All These Years" and you try to leave after she starts on "The Dangling Conversation" , even so you do still love "My Little Town" .

Everything in quotation marks is a Simon and Garfunkel tune, and is in chronological album order as seen here

Last edited by Donato on Sun Mar 11, 2007 9:18 pm; edited 1 time in total

Jimmy JazzMaster Baiter

Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 174
Location: Slowly going around the bend

Posted:
Sun Mar 11, 2007 9:06 pm

And let's not forget that the next time she asks how you are, tell her you're "feeling groovy".

_________________After all I have done for you, you still have the UTAHCITY to call me a fool - J*hn 1gwe

^^^^I've been there. It's full of people waiting to die. A bit like Jersey, but without the tax breaks.

_________________£1,052,334.30 (=US$2,121,125.60) lads fake cheques out of circulation (at 11/6/2008)
x135 (at 26/9/2008) x138
"i see your not interested in the transaction but catching your fun, calling names and my muckery of me." - Usman Bello
"You need to visit a good psychiatrist very fast, because some nuts are missing from your brain." - PROF.SOLUDO
"...it is very important you forward the your cycling proficiency certificate which by right belongs to you." - Prof Charles Soludo.
"note i can still change my mind to blow you off and whenever" - T0ny 'The Killerman' Erik
YOUR GENERATION WILL ROAST IN ABSTRACT POVERTY,BASTARD IDIOT -Daniel Mensah

JMRazorBaiting Guru

Joined: 03 Mar 2006
Posts: 7103
Location: Yes

Posted:
Mon Mar 12, 2007 12:52 pm

Wow, you guys are really on the ball. Unfortunately, Mrs. Robinson has lapsed into one of her semi-regular comas, and I'm left with the idiot lawyer...so until I can speak to my older love again, I'm left hoping that "April, come she will."

View next topicView previous topic
You cannot post new topics in this forumYou cannot reply to topics in this forumYou cannot edit your posts in this forumYou cannot delete your posts in this forumYou cannot vote in polls in this forum