Ryan Bradford is a writer. The problem, he says, is that
these days, most writing gigs are for websites that call stories
“content,” and search-engine optimization—not creativity, or even
quality—is the goal. more

I bit down. Ketchup, mustard and pickle filled my mouth. I stopped chewing. I held that piece of burger in the side of my mouth for nearly half an hour until finally choking it down. Since then, I’ve sworn off the big three condiments.more

If there were a sitcom where all the characters were played by cocktails, then a Mai Tai would play the role of a wacky cousin whom everyone thinks is a little strange until the poignant final moments.more

Now that summer’s here, we need to reassess men’s fashion. Women, you’re doing just great, but bros, c’mon. You look silly. You look like a bunch of grown-up toddlers. Have a little respect for yourself.more

As we leave the graveyard, my sister-in-law notices a white SUV trailing us. Where it came from, no one knows, but it almost certainly belongs to the private FLDS cops who are known to hassle outsiders.more

Beer Bro Bro Beard Hazy IPA: Notice your beard has gotten a pungent, hoppy aroma after all those IPAs? How about reinvesting those hop-hairs into a special brew? This beer has actually been pre-bearded for an extra hazy, hairy mouthfeel.more

After our first day on set, I understood why child actors are so fucked up: anything you want, it’s yours. Candy, soda, catered meals. It’s a bacchanalian orgy of freedom and hedonism, corrupting kids in the same manner as Pinocchio’s Pleasure Islandmore

Since Unarius is not a religion (well, sort of), it’s not really accurate to call it a cult. As noted in this column before, I was raised in the Mormon Church, so I know about cults. Diet cult might be a better description for Unarius.more

26. Considering that maybe none of this matters. That the threats to women, minorities, progressive change, the environment and the American political system as we know it are just that—threats.
27. Considering we'll probably be dead in four years.more