'Minions' meh.

Look. If you are going to see Minions, there are two things that you need to know:

You can’t unsee what you have seen

As long as you paid for it, and especially if you paid for 3D (God help you), stay for the curtain call at the end. It was made for 3D and will at least make the experience not so bad. Besides, it’s the minions doing their version of the Beatles Revolution.

It isn’t that Minions is bad. It’s kind of like Chinese food – you will forget everything about it about an hour after you have seen it. There isn’t anything in the film worth holding on to. Unfortunately, this doesn’t make the film popcorn fluff because it is just too mediocre to be anything but a timewaster. Yes, Sandra Bullock does a good job in the role of Scarlet Overkill, and yes, there are a few places that induce a little laughter. However, there wasn’t anyone in the theater rolling in the aisles with laughter. It was more of the embarrassed high school humor that scored. Even the jokes about Nixon and Walt Disney World fell short as the minions themselves. Even sadder is that everything in the trailer is in the movie, and it is the first several minutes. There wasn’t anything added to the film to make those gags any better than they are on TV and the Internet. So why would anyone see this film? I have no idea, but it is scheduled to have a huge box office, and the advertising brought by the swearing McDonald’s Happy Meal Toy should help bring people in. The film itself, uhhhh, meh.