Saturday, 11 June 2016

Kisses of fire

I've been trying very hard to concentrate on my studies but I'm very easily distracted with thoughts of Emily. It feels weird to feel this way about her because we've been friends for so long and she used to be my brother's girlfriend.

I feel like we're both a bit confused about the way we feel. I like her a lot but there's a part of me that questions if this is wrong. It sure feels right to be with her but I just don't know what to do.

It's been 3 years since Ethan's death and we've all moved on. I still miss him every day but the grief is not so suffocating anymore. Emily's obviously done a lot of healing as well. I can see how she's started to open up and make new friends instead of just keeping to herself.

I try to visit home as often as I can. Mom always takes me into this bone crushing hug and doesn't let go for minutes. She was even more emotional than usual this time because grandpa just got engaged and is looking for a house with his fiancée. Mom's happy for him but at the same time she says she's sad because soon she and Quinn will be all alone in that big house.

I talked to her about Emily which felt a bit weird because I usually don't talk to her about girls. She said I should just follow my heart. "Ethan would want you to be happy, Aaron" she said. I know she's right.

It's always great to see my family - least not for the fact that they always have something good to eat, this time it was a cake.

I finally took the leap and asked Emily on a date with me. We talked things through and agreed that us being together can't be wrong if it makes us both so happy.

Part of me is still sad and a bit guilty when I think about everything that Ethan never got to experience but I can't hang on to the past for the rest of my life. In a way I'm paying respect to my brother by living my life to the fullest.

We ended up kissing for the first time when we got back to the dorm. It was really nice. We're both getting used to feeling this way about each other so we're not in a hurry to go beyond kissing.

When we went inside we saw Frieda sitting in the study area and it was obvious that something was wrong. She looked like she had been crying and she never cries!

She finally told us that her dad's sick. She didn't go into details but I got the impression that it was pretty serious. She said that she's been so worried about him for a long time but he's so stubborn that her stepmom finally had to force him to see a doctor.

There's not much we can do expect to try and comfort her and keep her distracted with games and such so that she doesn't worry 24/7.

Emily and I are so happy that we're finally together but Frieda's situation definitely makes us feel a bit gloomy. We're just hoping everything will turn out alright.

Yeah, it's a bit confusing for them now but I think they're starting to get over it. As Aaron's mom told him, Ethan would want him to be happy. They're both still so young that it's probably a lot more difficult for them to deal with this kind of situation than if they were a bit older.

Aw, I'm glad to see Emily and Aaron making a go of things together. I think it's possible that things will feel weird between them at times, with Emily's history with Ethan, but it's worth it to give things a shot - it could end up being an amazing relationship for both of them.