Brené Brown's book Daring Greatly(I told you we would return to it) overall discusses this idea that we must be willing to experience vulnerable situations and BE vulnerable in order to live a little happier and succeed in life. Vulnerability leads to trusting relationships and overall greater gains despite any setbacks that may occur along the way.

Living in London I thoroughly enjoyed the chapter on minding the gap between who we are and who we want to be. Vulnerability and daring greatly come into play when we are willing to step out of our comfort zone in order to experience professional or personal growth.

WHO ARE YOU?

To mind the gap between who we are and who we want to be we must, first, figure out who we are. It's important to remember that you will never 100% know who you are. That's a myth we tell ourselves, but it's important to recognize your strengths and weaknesses and understand to some degree where you fit in in the world. We've all gone through that phase where we tried fitting into a mold that didn't fit us and, eventually, we learn that it is best to just be ourself. These experiences help us fit into our correct mold. I think we have to figure out who we aren't in order to figure out who we might be. This is not to say that we should try to change who we are. I'm simply saying that we must have a certain level of self-awareness so that we can 1) effectively network and market ourselves to potential employers and 2) steer our lives in the direction that WE choose and no one else.

This is a defining decade for us. Now don’t let that scare you. We all change and grow throughout life, but many of the decisions that we make throughout the next few years will shape who we become and the path our life takes.

WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE?

By determining who we are now we can pave a path towards the person we want to become. We can make the decisions that will get us safely over the gap. This self-awareness will help you decide who you want to be throughout your life. The person you want to become. What do you want people to say about you at your funeral? What kind of parent do you want to be? What kind of lover? What kind of employee? Manager? These are things we must ask ourselves now, as young professionals.

MIND THE GAP BETWEEN

Minding the gap does not mean that we need to invent a new way to get to the other side. It simply means to be aware of where you are stepping. To make the decisions that will make us the happiest over the long haul of our life. At some point we have to start looking beyond Friday night. We must look at the effect of our decisions on our life as a WHOLE. As we enter our third decade we are no longer allowed to think of ourselves as invincible. We must realize that we are fragile, vulnerable creatures that require certain things in order to not only survive this life we are given, but live a full life as well. These necessities are the gap that must be minded. Will you mind the gap or simply stay on one side?

How do you work to understand yourself? What steps are you taking to become who you want to be?

Check out my post Good Enough to read about Brené's philosophy on our culture of scarcity.

Why should you have a personal brand? Defining a personal brand forces you to start thinking about who you are. Cliché? Yes, but aren’t we supposed to figure out “who we are” in our twenties? A personal brand won’t help you figure that out, but it WILL help you name your core values and personality traits. You may not know where you are going in life right now, but it is absolutely NOT okay to waste this time.

Your personal brand will help you rock all of those future job interviews. You’ll also be able to find a company that upholds your values and is going to support your brand. You’ll be able to market yourself to future employers and potential spouses. What is sexier than someone who has a clear sense of self? How are you supposed to find a spouse or company with your same values if you’ve never actually identified them? Writing them down on paper and thoroughly reflecting on them gives you a much clearer idea of what you’re looking for in life. As you go through this process remember that you are trying to display your true self. Do not try to be something you’re not. You are too old for that. A genuine brand will last longer and be easier to maintain.

How to define your personal brand: 1: Identify 3 words and a color that you would use to describe yourselfI used this color meaning chart to help me pick a color that I felt thoroughly described who I am. We subconsciously associate meanings with colors so pick one that represents who you are, not just what looks good on you.

2: Ask other people for 3 words and a colorBe sure to ask a variety of people (coworkers, school friends, sorority/fraternity sisters/brothers, family, other friends). This allows you to see consistencies and get a better picture of who you are. 3: Look at your favorite brands and identify why you like them.What draws you to them? How do they help you express who you are? What values do you associate with that brand? This is a really great place for you to think about your values. Do you value quality? Loyalty? Family? 4: Pick your color(s). This decision should be based on responses from your peers, family, etc, not just the color you chose for yourself in step 1.

This is mine.

5: Create a brand logo usingwww.wordle.netWordle is a free website that creates word charts. Simply put in all the words you received from friends and family and values you chose for youself. Try to pick a single word for synonyms. For example, instead of using ‘outgoing’ and ‘gregarious’ I put ‘gregarious’ in twice (the more times the words appears in your list, the larger the word will be on your chart, you’ll want these bigger words for you brand later). Use the color(s) that you chose in step 4.

The chart will help you visualize your brand. It’s a temporary/working logo of sorts.

6: Pick the biggest words to use to define your personal brand. Some were the same size which allowed me some freedom of choice. Props to freedom!

And there you go! At this point, you should have a rough personal brand that you can use for anything in life.

What do you do now? Build and maintain your brand through social media, blogging, and everything else you do in life. Ensure that you are consistently representing the brand that you have made for yourself. Consistency allows people to trust you more because they see the same core values and personality traits in you all of the time (with variations for exhaustion and frustrations of course).

What is your personal brand? How has defining a personal brand helped you find success?

The BIG question in my life right now is "What do I want to be when I grow up?"

Yes, yes. I know that we all answered this question in kindergarten and then every year after that until middle school, but now its actually time to make a decision. I can no longer draw a picture of a firefighter, nurse, or astronaut and call my homework complete. I have to make a REAL decision.

In a desperate attempt to move this decision making process along I grabbed Lindsay Pollack's Getting from College to Career. Pollack shares some helpful advice on not only how to pick your dream job, but also how to get your dream job. Her first piece of advice for picking your career is to make a really big list of hobbies, interests, possible jobs, skills, etc.