Arranged Marriages

Arranged marriages are marriages in which the marital partners are chosen by parents based on different considerations other than the pre-existing mutual attraction of the partners. Arranged marriages are traditional customs in many cultures. In ancient times, it was a well-accepted way of marriage with the help of match-makers. Even though replaced by marriage based on love and not as popular as before, it does exist in the modern time.

A Funny Clip Poked Fun at Arranged Marriage in India

Japan is a typical country where arranged marriages find their fertile soil to blossom. In the first half of the twentieth century, the Japanese family was much more “traditional”. Young people did not even use to date; in other words, they did not go out together as couples. Instead, their parents arranged their marriages. Couples may meet each other for the first time on their wedding day. Maybe they fell in love after they got married, and maybe they did not for a whole life. After getting married, the wife and children stayed at home while the husband supported the family financially. He rarely helped in household and seldom spent time with the children. It was the husband who made all the rules and his family followed them. Because marriage was not an individual matter based on true love, family life did not use to be much fun. It was hard work for many of these couples who were chained to arranged marriages.

Arranged marriages lead to many social problems due to the lack of mental compatibility between husband and wife. Many people don’t think arranged marriages are good ideas because it is completely against human nature. If two people were arranged to get married, there would be plenty of arguments, fights, and disagreements between the two people because they didn’t have anything in common. Personally I wouldn’t want to have an arranged marriage. But I can understand from the views of certain cultures why arranged marriages work. This is because the parents’ generation might have experienced more in life than their children and therefore, according to their experience, they know which kind of companion will fit their inexperienced child.

Generally speaking, marriages based on love are more successful than arranged marriages. In its long history, China has witnessed many tragic events arising from arranged marriages. In addition, western societies tend to deride arranged marriages as backward and uncivilized and primitive. However, we should not go to extremes that all arranged marriages are failures because there do exist positive aspects. After all, arranged marriages did survive in the past 2000 years, and some of the couples did develop real love after their marriages. In the contemporary world, though marriages are based on love, strangely enough, the divorce rate has kept rising. Of course, it is also important to know the distinction between arranged marriages that are consensual and marriages that are arranged without the consent of the individuals involved. These are sometimes called Forced Marriages and are against the law in many countries.