Welcome

Welcome to the POZ/AIDSmeds Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and
others concerned about HIV/AIDS. Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the
conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning: Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive
and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a
username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own
physician.

All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators
of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ/AIDSmeds community forums.

We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please
provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are
true and correct to their knowledge.

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the
symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

IMPORTANT UPDATE
Posted Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription
is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with
secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the
"Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating
in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic
Forums. Similarly, all POZ and AIDSmeds pages,
including our "How is HIV
Transmitted?" and "Am I Infected? (A
Guide to Testing for HIV)" lessons, will remain accessible to
all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I
Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account
to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding
and future support of the best online support service for people living with,
affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author
Topic: i put myself at risk (Read 11201 times)

I have put myself at risk and I just need to get it all out, and I have no one else to talk to. I am not looking for spmathy or even advice. I just need to get this all out and hope the process will somehow sort my head out abit

Anyway enough of the melodrama, I am a gay male, mid 30's who has been in a happy monogamous relationship for almost 5 years, we are very happy, live together. The only major problem I have with our relationship is a lack a decent sex life. once every 2 months if i am lucky and even then it is always me making him cum, and then having a wank to sort myself out. Anyway I have tried talking to him about this but he says i am just putting him under pressure. Last month this was really getting to me really bad. Anyway, I went home to see my parents for a few days last month and one night I got very very drunk. I then went into town and went to a very sleazy club. I went into the dark room and sucked a few dicks and someone sucked mine. then someone stuck poppers up my nose, my jeans were pulled down, my arse covered in lube, and i got fucked. In the state I was in I didn't push him away imediately, but I did after 3 or 4 strokes. He deffinately didn't cum. there wan no condom. I also did my best to check that I wasnt bleeding, and as far as I could tell I wasn't.

Since then I have been very stressed, obviosly. For once I am glad that my boyfriend has no sex drive, and I will obviosly have no sexual contact with him unless i find out I am 100% clear of everything. It has been 2 weeks since this happened, and today I booked up to get a 28 day HIV test (obviosly i have booked it for 2 weeks time). I have been constantly thinking and stressing about if I am now HIV + and the implecations of this. If I do find out I am +'ve because of this, I will tell my bf imediately, I will have to move out, I have no friends who I could move in with or tell, so i guess i will have to move to a hotel or something.....sorry these are the types of fears thoughts that have been keeping me awake at night. I have been looking potentail early symptoms, just to make things more confusing my BF currently has many of these symptoms as he has a cold which is doing the rounds at the moment so I don't know if i get any of these symptoms wether they are me catching his cold or HIV. I know that I could have both and the symptoms for the cold could cover up the HIV symptoms. Any way at the moment;

fever- Definitely notaches in the joints and muscles - Definitely notfatigue- Definitely notnausea- nodiarrhoea - noheadache - yes I have a slight headache at the moment although I think that could be down to the stresssore throat -I have a dryness at the back of my throat, not really painful thoughswollen glands, often in the groin. -This is really making me panic, i had not thought about swollan glands befor but i now notice a constant vey mild ache in that area. although I remeber i had something like this before i put myself at risk

Also for the last 2 days I have had a runny nose, which i guess means I coould be getting this cold, which may bring on more misleading symptoms.

As I mentioned I will be getting a HIV test at a privite clinic I will aslo get a full check out for other STIs at a GUM clinic. I cant go to my local clinic as my bf is a nurse who is very good friends with all the staff there, and I don't want to take the risk. so I will try to find one further a field that has a walk in center.

while my mind is constantly thinking about weather I have HIV and the implications of this, i am also trying to carry on as normal, such as buying birthday a birthday present for my boyfiriend, even though there is a good chance by the time his birthday comes at the end of the month, he will have thrown me out.

maybe I should just confess now, i don't know. i didn't sleep at all last night and everytime he went to hold me i flinched and freaked out. not sure i can cope with another 13 days of this till test day.

No problem about the "rant." Glad you have found us to be able to discuss this.

You need to know that neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at the proper time can give you that answer. The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so with 4-6 weeks after a risk. For a final and conclusive negative result you need to test at 3 months after the risk.

As far as your incident, yes, it was definitely a risk because of the unprotected anal. You don't have to worry about the oral. Your saliva contains over a dozen elements and proteins which effectively prevent HIV transmission. And receiving oral is not a risk. And as far as the anal sex, it was a single incident and apparently without ejaculation. Those factors will work in your favor against transmission having occured.

So you have some waiting time to get through. If you test negative at 6 weeks the likelihood is that you will continue to test negative at 3 months or 12-13 weeks.

As for telling your partner about this incident, I would hold off for the moment. Don't act impulsively out of guilt. You did what you did. You're just a mere mortal like the rest of us. The sexual problem you mention in your relationship is something you may want to discuss further and perhaps even enlist some professional help together to deal with it.

Meantime you need to work at focusing on other matters in your lfie, which I know you may say is impossible. But it is possible and it will make the waiting time pass more quickly than you may imagine is possible. I am hopeful that you will test negative.

Thanks for your reply. it has helped alot just to know there is some one who wants to know how i get on.

You say that "neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at the proper time can give you that answer" I know this is true but it doesn't make it any better when i feel each of the symptoms start one by one. this afternoon i noticed the glands under my jaw feel inflamed, my throat is now saw and I am getting hot flushes which i feel may develop into a fever.

I know i may be paranoid, but I also know it is highly likely I have HIV and to be honest I think I have lost all hope that it is anything else (the cold my bf had definitely didn't involve swollen glands).

I may have to tell my bf now. maybe its a guilt thing but I don't think i can keep this bottled up.

Thanks for your reply. it has helped alot just to know there is some one who wants to know how i get on.

You say that "neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status. Only an HIV test taken at the proper time can give you that answer" I know this is true but it doesn't make it any better when i feel each of the symptoms start one by one. this afternoon i noticed the glands under my jaw feel inflamed, my throat is now saw and I am getting hot flushes which i feel may develop into a fever.

I know i may be paranoid, but I also know it is highly likely I have HIV and to be honest I think I have lost all hope that it is anything else (the cold my bf had definitely didn't involve swollen glands).

I may have to tell my bf now. maybe its a guilt thing but I don't think i can keep this bottled up.

OK, a few things.

Keep your hands off of your lymph nodes. Swollen nodes happen for all sorts reason. If you squeeze and bother them you can create a much bigger problem. Unfortunately now you are (mis)interpreting everything that happens to you through an HIV jitters mindset.

As for disclosing to your bf, that's your decision to make. Personally I always prefer to deal with difficult and serious issues early in the day to have some time to talk and digest whatever it is about. Good luck with that.

okay, back from a couple of beers and feeling not quite so stressed. still panicing, but not in a stressed way. I have just read the thread from someone who thought he had every symptiom going, and turned out to be neg. I hope i'll be the same and if i'm not then, i'll deal with it, somehow.

one problem i have is planning my day to day life after the results; things like; - I got a call from one of my BF's work mates asking if i wanted to go to a gig with her next month, I said no because i thought by then neither he, nor any of his (our) friends will want to speak to me by then.

- I wanted to get my bf a weekend break for his birthday, but that would involve booking flights in both our names, and if he doesn't want to know me by then...

as I wright this down i realize how stupid i am being.

thanks again for putting up with these post of mine and for asking me to let you know what happens.

As for keeping busy, my bf will have no idea why i will be so keen to get on with the decorating this weekend.

hi thanks again for the good advice. I will do my best to try and plan for life as normal following the results. anyway I forgot to mention that I have booked in to get a SDI test at a gum clininc next week. Too soon for a HIV test, but should test for anything else. Apart from anything else I think haveing that linned up for next week will some how stop me obsessing about hiv, a bit of distraction.

Today I have been allot less panicky, I realize that the occupational hot flush doesn't mean I have a fever. i am trying to keep as busy as possible, to stop obsessing. after working in the garden all day I took a break for half an hour and started thinking about what it would do to my bf if/when I told him. I know that kind of obsessing won't help, so i got back to distracting myself. it worked.

Well today has mostly been ok with my panicking limited to small doses. I am deffinately haveing 'hot flushes' but from what I have read this is not the same as the fever symptom, I had a bit of a panic when I was in the bath and noticed a dozen or so red spots on my leg (very localized, on my outer thigh) a quick panic thinking is this the rash, but from what I understand it is not where you would normally get the rash, and to be honest I have had spots on my legs in the past.

i do have a mild sore throat, which is worrying, but I am also sniffling, which suggests that I have my bf's cold. I had another mild panic when he told me that his cold involved allot of chest congestion when I have no problems with my chest.

Before you tell me, yes I know symptons or lack of them mean nothing, and over analysing will do more harm than good, but I can't help but notice any potential symptom and finding out that they don't quite match up with Seroconversion is actully helping, as is having somewhere like this to make a note of these things.

morning, just a quick note. I have been thinking that these hot flushes have been panic attacks. they come on when i think i find another symptom, i then think i have a fever so the panic attack gets worse so the hot flush continues. It is usually accompanied with shaking and my heart beating out of control.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

ok, i am chilled. Went to get general std check up at a GUM clinic today. it's been 21 days so too soon for hiv test, but they took one anyway. in some ways it helped me calm down especially as the dr had a quick feel of my throat & groin glands and said neither felt enlarged. it could be 2 weeks before I get a text message back telling me my results. not had any paranoid panic attack today. just a bit worried my bf will notice the mark on my arm left by the plaster the nurse put on after taking the blood test.

anyway we are going away with friends this weekend and I have lots on at work next week, which all means I should be keeping myself busy rather than freaking out.

Again it helps having this forum to stop me bottling things up, it might mean i am posting too many inane posts, but its helping me.

Hi again,Yesterday started as a good day, no paranoid noticing of any potential symptoms and as the morning went on i actually started to relax and look forward to our weekend break. I was thinking, if i do turn out to be positive then i will have alot of shit to deal with so I may as well make the most of this weekend before i go for my test. Anyway as the day went on, this relaxed state started to get a bit, hyperactive. I was going online and buying things i didnít want or need, I was coming up with loads of good ideas at work for various projects but I couldnít focus on them enough to get started on anything. Then i realised that i was getting a bit out of control, in a small way. I also noticed another, hopefully paranoid Ďsymptomí. My armpits felt sensitive & uncomfortable. I didnít go back to a panic attack, but the relaxed state I was in, in the morning had gone.Today I woke up with sensitive armpits and groin and iíve been a bit flat all day because ive been paranoid. I know these supposed symptoms mean nothing and how easy it is to see things that arnt there if you look hard enough. I have also tryed to remind myself that i donít have things like a rash or fever. But i still feel the need to get all this down in this post.

Tomorrow I am going on a long weekend away with my bf & his sister & friend. I am hoping it will be lots of fun and keep me too busy to get paranoid. But then the paranoid part of me is thinking as soon as i get there I will come out with a rash all over my face which will be obvious to them (they are all nurses). Anyway time to stop worrying and start packing

Ok halfway through our weekend and ha e to say its going great. Too busy to be paranoid about symptoms. And the only thing i am really noticing is my tounge feels swollen on one side. As far as i have read thAt isnt a hiv early symptom so no idea what thAt might be all about. Anyway in my worried state i do get obsessed about percentages and prebebilities. I go over the incedent in my mind and think how each action could have increased or decreased my odds of hiv. And then the probebilities of geting or not geting various symptoms.

24 days since exposure. Throat has been sore for over a week but ive also had a blocked, bunged up nose allthat time so i hope they are connected. Sesitive armpits and occational slight sensitivity around the neck/jaw but this might be me being over paranoid. This morning i was worrued i thought i saw a rash starting to develop on my chest. Itwas slightly red but that might be down to the room being very hot and my over active paranoia.

It's rather unlikely that you would be told "you need treatment" if they're talking about a positive hiv test. If that were the case, they'd only say that they need to see you. If they're saying treatment, it's much more likely to be one of the more easily transmitted infections that can be cleared with a course of antibiotics.

GUM clinics do not normally put a person newly infected with hiv on treatment. I know this because I also live in the UK. They are very strict here about not treating hiv infection until the patient qualifies under the treatment guidelines and a newly infected person does not fall into this category. I've been positive for fourteen years and even I do not yet qualify for treatment.

Stop fretting and go the the GUM and find out what's going on. It's the only way.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Gonorrhea is very easily transmitted, unlike hiv. It does not mean that you will have also been infected with hiv. The negative result you have so far, while not conclusive, is a very good result. The average time to seroconversion is only 22 days and there's a good chance that if you were actually infected, your 21 day result would have been inconclusive rather than negative.

Hang in there while you wait for your conclusive test result. Make sure you get that gonorrhea sorted out.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Thanks for replying. I will go to the clinic in the morning. I dont suppose if gonarea can cause the tenderness in my armpits? Anyway it means so much to have this forum. I am at on the way back from this mini holuday with my bf & his friend & sister, trying to act normal, while getting a text message from the clinic. I kniw i deserve all this for cheating on him, and my guilt is not what this firum is for, but it helps so much knowing that i am not quite alone. And dont worry i will get the gohnarea sorted.

You'll have to ask about the tenderness at the clinic tomorrow. It could be anything.

You don't deserve this for cheating. STIs are not a punishment, they're just bugs. It's not even like you went out intentionally to bareback - someone did that to you and you stopped it as soon as you realised. Stop beating yourself up.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Hi a couple of quick things. First that last hiv test was actually 19 days since the exposure. Not sure how i managed to count it as 21 at the time. So that result less reasuring i guess. Also on tonights flight i got a nose bleed. I freaked partly because i didnt know if it was a hiv/gonorea/stress thing but more becase i thought someone might try to dab it and i might have to stop them by saying i think im hiv+ What a way to tell my bf, his sister& friend. I nipped to the loo and thought i was going to cry. Anyway the nose bleed stopped and i managed to calm down.

back from the clinic. they have given me something for the gonorrhea and told me the sesitive armpit thing is nothing to do with the gonorrhea. I have never felt anything which i could describe as swlling in my lymph glands but from my armpits to my chest there is definitively a sensitivity which on the chest feels like small bruises.

Also the rash on my chest I saw yesterday morning is still there. A slight red, non itchy rash. Yesterday i put it down to a hot hotel room, but i can't do that today

Did you show your rash to anyone at the clinic? If your chest/armpit continues to bother you, see your GP.

About the nose bleed, even if you were hiv positive it would be no reason to tell anyone. Hiv isn't transmitted that way. Skin is a very effective barrier to hiv and someone helping you with a nosebleed would not be at risk.

I know you wish we had some magic words for you, but unfortunately we don't. You're just going to have to hang in there until the appropriate time to test - which is at six weeks. Even though your previous test was at nineteen days, any negative result is a good thing.

Keep yourself productively busy while you wait to test and the time will go more quickly than you might think.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Personally, I think that if you're going to a private clinic for testing, you're wasting your money. You were most likely tested with a duo test at the GUM as it's pretty much the standard test in the UK. Private clinics that offer duo testing for a hefty fee are just making money off people's fears. I hope you haven't already handed over your money and can cancel the appointment. Stick with the GUM clinic.

As we've told you, it really is best to wait for six weeks. The p24 antigen part of the duo test isn't really worth anything by 28 days - it's only present in the first couple weeks. Once antibodies begin to be formed, the p24 antigen disappears.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Ok well I booked and paid for the clinic test almost 2 weeks ago. I am still going to go. but thanks for letting me know that the duo test is pretty much the standard.

I have found it really hard to focus on anything today because of the rash. when I started getting paranoid about all my potential symptoms I remeber thinking i can cope with anything but a rash. its not something that can as easilly be explained away. its red, non itchy, covers an area about the size of my hand, its on my chest, & it has lots of tiny raised spots.

trying to keep busy but i can't focus. plus tomorrow i will have to go back to work where lots of questions will be asked as to why I wasn't at an important meeting today, when i was at the clinic.

my sore throat seems to be giving me a sore ear as well, not sure whats going on there.

I managed to speak to a great old friend today, and get alot of this of my chest. that helped allot.

my head has felt very hot today. not really feaver i don't think, maybe stress high blood pressure?

Ok well I booked and paid for the clinic test almost 2 weeks ago. I am still going to go. but thanks for letting me know that the duo test is pretty much the standard.

I have found it really hard to focus on anything today because of the rash. when I started getting paranoid about all my potential symptoms I remeber thinking i can cope with anything but a rash. its not something that can as easilly be explained away. its red, non itchy, covers an area about the size of my hand, its on my chest, & it has lots of tiny raised spots.

trying to keep busy but i can't focus. plus tomorrow i will have to go back to work where lots of questions will be asked as to why I wasn't at an important meeting today, when i was at the clinic.

my sore throat seems to be giving me a sore ear as well, not sure whats going on there.

I managed to speak to a great old friend today, and get alot of this of my chest. that helped allot.

my head has felt very hot today. not really feaver i don't think, maybe stress high blood pressure?

right time to pick my bf up from work and try to act natural.

There is still nothnig HIV specific about any of the symptoms you are reporting.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

i have just had another check. my entire chest and stomach is covered in these tiny raised red spots. I have my clinic appointment & 28 day test tommorow morning. after that I don't think i will get my results untill monday (2 working days).

who knows maybe the doctor tommorow will give me some hope that the rash is something else. sorry to be pessimistic but

i dont know.

I hope that by this time next week, whatever happens the wait will be over. meanwhile i will try to keep from breaking down in front of my bf, as well as keeping my rash covered.

Morning. Ive arrived for my clinic appointment 2 hours early. Ive been awake since 4 and i was just freaking out in bed so i headed off early. I thought i was going to vomit on the drive down here. Not sure if that was stress, tiredness, a side effect of the gonarea tablet, or something else. When i got out of the car i felt very dizzy. Having some breakfast now so hope that will help.

They let me into the clinic about 40 mins early but then they told me they had no record of my appointment which was made vua the better to know website. Also they had no drs in so no one could see me today. I paniced and complained and they managed to get me seen at an alternative clinic round the corner.

That is a very good result. If the rash etc you've been experiencing had anything to do with hiv, I would have expected today's result to come back at least as indeterminate, if not outright reactive (positive). This is because the symptoms that sometimes accompany seroconversion are not caused by the virus itself, they are caused by the process the body goes through while producing antibodies.

You still need to confirm your results at the three month point, but if I were you, I'd relax.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

OK, since i got my result last week I have got my life back, I have been able to plan and think about the future and i've been able to relax. I still have a tiny paranoia that somehow the clinic got it wrong, either by doing the wrong tests or by the fact that the guy who told me my results over the phone ("none detected" was the exact phrase he used) somehow read the results out wrong. My armpits are still sore and I still have a mild rash/spots on my chest. At least now i am allowing myself to admit they might be/ probably are something else.

I realize this is a silly paranoia, and i'll get myself another hiv test when i go back to the GUM clinic next week to make sure the gonorrhea treatment has worked.

Relax already. While those private clinics may be in the business of parting you from your hard-earned dosh, they're still pretty serious on the medical side and they're not going to make mistakes like you're imagining.

"Non-reactive" is the standard way of reporting a negative antibody result. There are several "bands" involved in the test and a certain amount of them have to test reactive in order for it to be interpreted as a positive result. A non-reactive results means that none of the bands reacted. If you had been in the middle of seroconversion, at least some of the bands would have been reactive thereby giving you an "indeterminate" result.

Get busy with other things while you wait for your confirmatory test. Am I starting to sound like a broken record? I feel like one too.

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

"Non-reactive" is the standard way of reporting a negative antibody result. There are several "bands" involved in the test and a certain amount of them have to test reactive in order for it to be interpreted as a positive result. A non-reactive results means that none of the bands reacted. If you had been in the middle of seroconversion, at least some of the bands would have been reactive thereby giving you an "indeterminate" result.

Thanks this has helped shut those paranoid voices in my head up. and Thanks for all the help you and Andy have provided on this forum over the last few weeks. now please excuse me while i get on with my life

Ok, im off for my 6 week test tomorrow. After my 4 week test results and the advice i got on here i am no longer convinced i am positive. I cant help thinkining i might get a bit jittery in the week or 2 it will take to get my results back. Hopefully not.

Jitters come and go. Make a real effort to focus on other matters in your life while waiting. And don't bother saying oh I can't because I am too worried. I can tell you that response is not going to fly here. Just do it.