COPYRIGHT (c)

Don't be an ass. Seriously. If you can't write, you can't write. Period! Don't steal my stuff... if you do, the wrath of the gods of Olumo rock will fall on your head, your hair will not stay combed, mad men will invade your home, food in the freezer will spoil mysteriously. NO-ONE WILL TALK TO YOU AT PARTIES!!!

Part 2: the awards

Standard

kiss my ass

So never one to take things lightly. I have gone far out of my way and shoved away all my work, my project and test and the reading for exam I’m not really doing to write my acceptance speech to the award I received.

First stop: Google. Where will the world be without google. Google is the king, the Solomon, the know all that knows all… to the must stupid shit. Like what would zombies do when they’ve finished eating all human flesh…? Or why the world cannot end in 2012…? Trust me Google knows.

Well, here goes in the word of google herself (yeah Google is a girl get over it! Girls know everything what do you think gossiping is for?! TO SPREAD THE KNOWLEDGE. DUH!) I have being guided and will now make this perfect speech.

ACCEPTANCE SPEECH WRITE 101

I’m not at all surprised I won the award. I don’t write for jokes or all that you know? When I get on the key-board it’s serious business all the way. I’m just being honest here. I know how to crack jokes, I know laughter, I know english… so, me getting this award? Totally expected. But so it won’t be like I’m being arrogant… YAY!!! THANKS I was so NOT expecting this AT ALL. I mean I’ve being writing since I was 11 and I’ve being asked to be a guest writer on a blog but I thought it was just because they pitied me you know… being black and all…I want to thank well er… wordpress. Yeah, for the free blog and all. Even though you completely swallowed up two posts I did the day before last so that when I woke up today, expecting to see that little orange button showing at least 1 view, I get some annoyed followers asking where the hell was the post they had being notified about… thanks a lot wordpress. Assholes.

I want to thank my best-friend, even though she will never see this since she is too busy to just drop by and see what’s up. but always has time for all the fashion blog posts all over. I need new friends.

To all the viewers, thank you. I mean it. of course, it will be nice if you could, I donno, rate the post or comment but hey whatever. I don’t care…

I also want to thank my school’s server. It was down for a week and I sulked and cried everyday but now it’s back: slow, sluggish but alive, like one of the old people who-

NO! I can’t do this… A ‘nice’ or ‘good one mate’ or even ‘:)’ will actually go a long way. It’s like y’all just come read laugh it off and go till next time. Which is EXACTLY WHAT YOU DO!!!! I’m not a machine you know!! I have feelings! And every time you don’t comment a little of me dies inside… it’s not fair!!! I put the like button there, the rate button to make it easier but NNNOOO!! It’s just too much to ask for right!!! RIGHT!!! I mean what the—

(I am eventually booed of stage amidst hurlings of tomatoes and chairs)