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Life is beautiful. Really, it is. Full of beauty and illusions. Life is great. Without it, you’d be dead. – Soloman, Gummo – 1997

Every now and again I find myself craving a good cult film. The type of obscure cult film that only exists in the far reaches of the internet. The type of film that leaves you shook and not always in the good way. Where you can’t decide if the film is artistically brilliant or horrendously horrible. Most of the time, it’s both and that seems to be the case with Harmony Korine’s 1997 classic – Gummo.

I rarely go see horror films in theaters. I think there is something to be said for sitting in a dark room, alone with a good horror flick. You experience your own fear, in your own way, without the influence of nervous laughter, or ambient theater noise, because that’s what a good horror movie is, an experience.

What motivated me to see Raw in the theater was it’s limited release, coupled with the buzz it’s been generating online. Four awards including the Citizen Kane Award and Cannes. Audiences vomiting and fainting in theaters. Heralded as “gruesome nightmare fuel” barely skirting an NC-17 rating and the only plot reveal was something about a coming of age story, paired with cannibalism. I was intrigued and the moment it hit my local indie theater, I had my ticket.

I am a horror fan, like my mother and father before me. It’s been a lonely life, given that 90% of my social circle is very anti horror. They feel it is either too gory, too scary, too intense, or too uncomfortable, basically all the things I love most about horror. This has lead to me exploring my horror movie fandom in private, surfing the streams for the next shocker. It hasn’t been all bad, streaming media channels have greatly improved their horror collections in recent years. In some cases, they are the best place to find new horror that is too graphic for theaters, however, there’s always that one film that gets all the buzz online, wins at all the festivals, but never makes it to theaters or to streaming. I can sometimes catch it on Red Box, but I have to be vigilant because it comes and goes so quickly, it is easy to miss it.