Monday, 8 July 2013

Clarity creates certainty, once you are clear on what you value, what your drivers are, you can update the old ones. Change only happens with real conviction and it is what you believe that will drive your actions (or lack of action).

Change for the sake of change is difficult to sustain! The proof is in those many perceived failures from past attempts.

I struggle a lot with making decisions (especially the important ones). And the more I dig into clearing my lack of clarity, that has recently come to light, I wonder how many of you might benefit from or resonate with my latest insights?

My Insights:

Know what you want. Every one is running on some sort of blue print, conscious or not... which side do you want to be sitting on; conscious or unconscious?

If actions are run by your unconscious beliefs and you aren't too sure of what your values are... Well, you guessed it, you'll be wading through misery when the life you want doesn't match up to your actions.

Making changes that someone else prescribes AIN'T going to work either (not unless it's deeply aligned with your values & vision). Another reason that might not work 100%, is because even though the person prescribing advice is experienced... you're unique and you are the only one who will listen to you in the end. You ultimately, are the expert in your life.

Lack of clarity on ones values (your own not those which are prescribed to you by your minister or mother) = low conviction for change.

Therefore; a lot of the frustration we modern folk face; might be due to the fact that we make too much compromise on our authenticity & autonomy (who we are) and what we want.

We chase interests without really knowing our true values because of the above and are swayed from here to there like drifters, never surmounting to much more than the state of tedium on auto-pilot & ultimately perpetuating more of what we don't want.

Change is directly proportionate to the degree in which you value the change your looking for. Or shall I rather say it like this: you will not change something about yourself until it is valuable enough to do so - to the point of outweighing the cost for staying the same. I.O.W.: How can you ELEVATE the change you're looking for to a higher statues of value?

Figuring out this s#%t is scary, because it means that you are actually in the drivers seat if you want to create the life you would love more deliberately.

You say you want to change... but what is the perceived cost?
How willing are you to pay the price?
What's the price for staying right where you are?
Red pill or Blue pill?

Just for a fun, dramatic effect & to drive my point... a clip from "The Matrix" just in case you're still wondering which pill is which.

Think of the "the Matrix" he's talking about as a metaphor for your beliefs and perceptions as a lens through which you "see" through; creating the world you experience.

Summary:

Know what you want! This is the big "why".Find a way to align you actions to your values in creating what you want! This is perhaps the best kind of motivation and it is something you are intrinsically.
Can you see your purpose, your dream/vision, the life you would love to have?
Key: How certain are you that it's going to happen?
Can you visualise, taste, smell, hear, touch it?
What's the first thing you can think of to do to get clear?

It is my purpose, my mission to help others reconnect the disconnection that can run on autopilot and through coaching those who are ready in empowering themselves to be conscious creators of the lives they'd love.

Crate your life deliberately.
Are you mad about your life... Or are you Mad-Crazy-In-Love About your life? It's a choice,

Work with Me:

I invite you to view my coaching options and consider becoming a beta (guinea pig) client if you'd like to be coached for getting clear and deliberate in any area of your life. Pick up you'r phone and give me a call or send me a text or e-mail.

Anyway, my course requires that I accumulate some fieldwork hours (around 100 paid hours - I'm aiming to do even more, 'cause I'm just like that)!

If you think you or know of someone who would like to be my experiments at a really good rate and want to know more about what Coaching is. In-box me: madlifecoach@gmail.com
So far I have two really brave people to practise on... I'll be updating the insights from my experimental clients (with their permission of coarse).

Quick Life Coaching Summery:

Just in case you've been living under a rock and wondering what that's about

In the coaching relationship... it's all about you! It's a synergistic process where, you're the expert and I'm your sounding board. It's all about you taking responsibility for the life you have (look at where you currently are) and want (Where you'd like your life to be) and everything in it. It the process, we discover the miss-match , find your core values and dreams and through deliberate collaboration, we design (you design) the steps to move you in the direction to making whatever part you want into a reality. the coaching process includes thought provoking questions (curiosity gets you into solution seeking prospective= more empowering), feedback, re-framing & accountability.
Through the process, you start learning these awareness skills and develop more emotional intelligence and capacity to expand into your full potential.
This is a totally open, non-judgemental & confidential space.

I'm not going to sugar coat it for you (even though the above sounds pretty sweet); it takes guts to own your s*%t and to see that happiness isn't all positive thoughts and roses. But through the process you fine the coherence and congruence and presence to see everything (both the negative & positive forces of life) as perfectly balanced and exactly what you need to step into your value (what you've here to do/your potential). I's about not being ruled by emotional overwhelm or circumstances, but taking your life and creating more of what you want ON PURPOSE. Life no longer happens to you.. it starts happening for you.

It requires: courage, letting go to attached stories of your past (shifting perspective), experimentation (stepping out your comfort zone), finding the skills you need to adopt to make change (adaptability), accountability (setting yourself up to be held accountable DELIBERATELY - useful for those days of doubt), planning, self awareness, measurement, re-assessment.

What life coaching is not:

It's not therapy, counselling or anything of the sort. I deal with the current blocks and move you forward until you can learn the process and take the momentum over.

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I'm just starting to create the life I love... Throughout my 20's, I've been through many journeys to finding my purpose in the pursuit of growing my self-value and finally finding my place in the world.
All the events in my life (good & especially the bad) have equipped me with the resilience and fire and drive for life. I'm on fire.
I'm working my way to becoming a credentialed life coach, collaborating with like minds who have purpose - my dream life! My biggest value is adding value and my purpose is to help others re- discover theirs in the most effective way.
I take on paying guinea pig clients to rack up my required fieldwork hours for my training as a life coach.
Besides that, I'm a mother to a 5 year old son & wife to a foot-lose mountain-man. I have a yoga business called Mad About Yoga & I specialize in coaching private clients in & around Cape Town. I teach underground early morning group classes.
You can be mad about your life or Mad-Crazy-In-Love with your life! Which one do you choose?
Watch this space as my adventures and vision unfolds...