Carolyn Hax: Think of consequences before apologizing to long-ago ex

4:51 PM,
Oct. 9, 2013

Written by

Carolyn Hax

Dear Carolyn: I'm hoping you can help. A friend and I were discussing the merits (or lack thereof) of apologizing to someone for long-ago wrongs - namely significant others.

I argue it's a bad idea. If I got an apology from a certain jerky ex, I'd think it was pretty arrogant of him to think I'm still thinking about him and he only wants his conscience absolved - both of which aren't about me. You shouldn't do that to someone else, and your guilt is your punishment to carry. ...