Self talk, your sub mind cannot take a joke. What you tell it is real and possible is real and possible.

Try it for real. example. Everytime you see one of your loved ones, say under your breath out loud, but not so they can hear,"I hate you" then watch how the relation changes. Better yet say "I love you" everytime and watch the fun begin. Tell yourself that you are rich and intelligent and everybody loves you. It will affect your life.