At a charity softball game over the weekend, Charles Barkley got on camera and told a story about the first time that he ever saw Dirk Nowitzki play.

Dirk was 18 years old (or 16 or 19 depending on which part of Chuck’s story you listen to) when he torched Team USA and Scottie Pippen for 50-something points playing for Germany. I’ll let Chuck take it from here:

I said “Dude, who the hell are you?” He starts talking, he’s like 18 or 19. “Where you goin’ play at?” He says “I have to go in the army.” I said “dude, you can’t go in the army playing like that.” I said “I’ll tell you what.” So I called Nike, I said “Find out about this kid, tell him I’ll give him anything he wants to go to Auburn.” Just tell him, “Anything he wants, we’ll get it done.”

It gets better. Just watch the video:

Chuck goes on to say that “we take care of you in the SEC”, that SMU would have fit in in the SEC, and that the $200,000 that Auburn gave Cam Newton was a “good damn investment”, the kind of deal that he wishes his accountant would be able to pull off.

Barkley is hilarious. I wonder if the folks at Auburn feel the same way.