Saturday, January 16, 2010

How to draw things

Ghosts, Pirates, and the cold void of Space. Is there any conceivable thought more terrifying than that of a peaceful lunar colony under attack by ghost pirates? I should think not. What would such a scene look like? Well, lets find out together. Get those drawing pencils ready, for we are about to draw a lunar colony under attack by ghost pirates.Step 1 - Draw a standard lunar surface. The secret to drawing lunar surfaces is to draw a regular earth-like surface, then put circles all over it. Circles are a very common thing on lunar surfaces. Such a surface would hold up even under the most intense NASA scrutiny.

Step 2 - There. Now we have a nice flat lunar surface with plenty of circles. Next we need to build a lunar pod under which the temporarily non-haunted colony can set up shop. This is done by drawing yet more circles, then erasing some of the circle so that it is actually more of half-circle. Half-circles are perhaps the most futuristic shape imaginable, so lets put two of them down there with a little bridge between them so the colonists can travel between the two circles with ease.

Step 3 - Now, the colonists are going to need a way to get out onto the moon surface in order to complete their science-studies on the surface circles. So let's add some doors. As usual, slighly circular doors are best cus they are the most futuristic. I imagine they would make that cool "Pssshhhhhhh" noise when they opened. Yeah, cool. Anyway, I have drawn two circle-doors, but you can make as many as you want (no more than 3). Also, lets give the pod a wicked awesome future name. Mixing letters and numbers together usually results in a futuristic-rich name. Do this at random until you come up with something cool.

Step 4 - There we go. Pod 70X4. X is also a very futuristic letter, so try to use as many of those as possible. Now that our pod has a futuristic name, lets give it some futuristic accessories. A radar dish is pretty cool, and again can be drawn with naught but circles. Another thing any self-respecting lunar pod needs is a rocket landing pad. This can be drawn by simply creating a rectangle on top of one of the pods. Finally, just for fun, let's throw a lunar-tank-vehicle (LTV) out there. Don't worry, this won't be enough to stop ghost pirates, so we're still good to go with the invasion.

Step 5 - Now, I know what you are thinking. "Where are the ghost pirates? This looks like a regular lunar colony pod! You, sir, are a charlatan and a fraud!" That is not the case, my artist friend. We simply have to make sure that we have created the proper context for the ghost pirate attack. We are almost to the point where we can add the ghostly invaiders. But first, lets finish up the pod. Every great battle scene needs to have a flag involved in some way, so just stick one in there somewhere. I've put mine next to the rocket, cus flags and rockets are like two of the coolest things you can draw together. Don't spend too much time on the rocket. It's really not important outside of the fact that it enhances the overall futuristic-tivity of the scene.

Step 6 - Now, let the invaision begin! Draw a couple of skeleton pirates at random places around the pod. Drawing one of the roof is particularly cool, cus how did he get up there? Ghost pirate magic? A ladder? We may simply never know. Also, let's put some clouds up there. Clouds on the moon are unlikely, but they look totally sweet. And let's draw a moon in the sky. Presumibly, this is some other moon that orbits our moon, or some sort of sub-moon. Sub-moons are very futuristic. Anyway, let's put the standard treasure chest out there, just cus ghost pirates don't go anywhere without their treasure and while we are at it, let's put a busty mermaid figure onto the side of the pod, just for kicks. They are very versitle.

And there you have it. A lunar pod being attacked by ghost pirates. The perfect combination of terror, future, romance and, um.....sub-moons.

About Me

I am a 36 year old geologist. Well, kinda geologist. I used to spend my day putting dirt in little baggies and tube for study. Now I'm unemployed and looking for love. In High School I ran for class office and lost.