A family living on a farm in the countryside decides that they could boost their income by making beer. So, they open a brewery. After they had manufactured a few samples, they decided to send it to some beer experts so that they could have an opinion about the quality of the beer.

After a few weeks they receive the following letter from the experts:
"Dear Smith Family,
We are sorry to inform you that your horse has diabetes"

When a guy’s printer type began to grow faint, he called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed him that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told him he might be better off reading the printer’s manual and trying the job himself.

Pleasantly surprised by his candor, he asked, "Does your boss know that you discourage business?"

"Actually, it’s my boss’s idea," the employee replied sheepishly. "We usually make more money on repairs if we let people try to fix things themselves first."

A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Out in the jungle is a village and right next to it is a pharmacy. One day, the chief of the village goes to the pharmacy and says to the pharmacist: "Big chief no shit". Understanding that the chief is suffering from constipation the pharmacist gives his a box of laxatives.

The following day, the chief returns, irritated, he says to the pharmacist: "Big Chief no shit!" So the pharmacist gives him 3 boxes of laxatives.

A day later, the chief comes back with two of his aides, ranting: "Big Chief noooooo shit!!!" The pharmacist hurriedly hands him 10 boxes of laxatives.

Finally, the next day, the cheif returns yet again, with 5 of his warriors and they are holding their weapons in their hands. The chief is furious as he rants: "BIIIIG CHIEF NOOOO SHIIIIIITTTT!!!!" So the pharmacist, desperate, gives him all the laxatives in his supply.

For a week there is silence until a little old lady comes in to the pharmacy and says: "Big shit, no chief!"