— It’s Weird To Throw Labels On Things: Blake is dating a girl he doesn't want to call his girlfriend, possibly because all his ex-girlfriends (of whom he has exclusively been the dumper and not the one getting dumped) despise him

— Foxy Casey: New early Jimi Hendrix recordings have surfaced, and Keith is the only one who thinks they sound like the Grateful Dead and Bob Dylan

— I Eat Mop Who?: Jackie ‘The Joke Man’ Martling calls in with some new jokes

— Directionless: One Direction’s Zayn Malik has left the group

— Unfare: Blake has been hit by 3 separate cabs on his Vespa in NYC but didn’t get any money because they all drove away. He now can’t feel his knee or 3 of his toes.

— A Roller Coaster Of Emotions: The Coney Island Cyclone got stuck on its opening day, forcing riders to climb down manually

— Be Our Guest: The gang discusses the recent trend of retail establishments referring to customers as guests

— What A Gas: 2015’s hot new selfie location is the sight of the East Village explosion. Among news that 2 people are still missing comes the revelation from Con Ed that a gas main at Sushi Park was tampered with 7 months before the blast.