Monday, February 27, 2012

Perspective

When William was two and Lucy was a baby, my friends Amy and Dona also had two kids those same ages. The only difference was that Dona's oldest was a girl while Amy and I both had boys.

In the midst of trying to navigate the new waters of having a toddler and a baby under one roof, I once asked the ladies when they showered during the day and what they did with the kids during that time. Dona told us she put her baby son on her bed while her two-year-old daughter played with him. Both Amy and I struggled to pick our jaws up from the floor. Dona had no idea why we were in such shock.

"Dona," I said, "If I ever did that, William would unintentionally kill Lucy."

"Yes," agreed Amy, "So would Jack."

And as horrid as that sounds I think it was true. A two-year-old boy and a two-year-old girl are two completely different species. While William was a sweet, sweet toddler he was rather rough with Baby Lucy. I really believe he thought she was his own pin cushion/monster truck/board to hammer come to life.

So I smiled to myself the other day when I jumped in the shower at 4 p.m. Don't judge. Four O'Clock is so totally a normal time to take a shower.

While I was showering all three of the kids were awake. Lucy was watching Little Einsteins and just below the television was Katherine on her floor mat playing with William, who informed me that Little Einsteins was only for babies. Nobody was crying. Nobody was screaming. Nobody was fighting.

I was reminded of that conversation with Dona and Amy a couple of years earlier because here I was in a completely opposite frame of mind. The worry that Katherine might get hurt by the older children never even crossed my mind. In fact, I was so confident I didn't even feel rushed and actually made time to shave my legs.

This little anecdote is the great reminder to me, and maybe to you too, of what my mom always told me: This too, shall pass.

The baby doesn't sleep through the night. Not even close. Lucy screams. All the time. William has difficulty following directions. Especially when we're in a hurry.

But these are challenges of their ages and stages. The challenge will pass and a new one will take its place. Ever the revolving door.

It also reminds me of when William tells me I'm the best mom in the world and he still wants to snuggle up on the couch with me. It reminds me of sweet open kisses from the baby and how she always lights up when I walk into her room and never ever talks back. It reminds me of when Lucy pronounces all her "sp" words with an "f" so we make her say "sparten" so we can hear her say "farten" and all have a good laugh.

These things, too, shall pass.

It's never all good. But it's never all bad either. Rather, it's all in how you look at it.