“Had Manchester United ‘s performances on the pitch been as dramatic as LVG’s five-minute Christmas address , he would not be fighting to save his job.

“Instead of asking for an apology from the media over rumours – which started on Twitter, not in the papers – that you had been sacked on Tuesday, how about apologising for your dreary football, Louis?

“It’s all very well pointing out that United were top of the Premier League four weeks ago.

“But today they are nine points off the pace in the title race.

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“Four weeks ago, they were still in the Champions League , too – but in 2016 they will be playing on Thursday nights in Europe.

“It is unfortunate that Van Gaal found himself batting away false rumours about his sacking and fielding anxious calls from his wife, children and friends.

“When you are Manchester United manager, speculation goes with the territory, especially when results and performances are so poor.

“But thanks for the mince pies and glass of wine, anyway. I know colleagues in the media appreciated such a festive gesture.”