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March 29, 2012

Ever since I was a kid, the only thing I look forward to was my college graduation. And now it’s finally over, I don’t know what else to look ahead. I can’t see any bright lights, only blurry images. Lol. I’m starting to feel really scared.

What will I do?

No one’s got my back anymore  I was thinking of just getting myself killed so I won’t have to think things over and over again. Haha. Yeah, sometimes, I do think that way. I know I don’t have the guts to do it but it fear me that someday due to stress I might actually commit suicide. All I need is some research which one provides less pain and agony. Haha!
Oh! I really don’t know what to do..
Anyway, my friend Matet is leaving in weeks now, off to Germany to marry the man she loves. Whoa, proposals are everywhere and so are engagements, it’s envious, everyone’s happy with their love life and I’m not! It’s unfair! Lols. I’m kidding. I’m actually happy being single and free. To settle down is the last thing I have in mind. I might tie the knot when I’m really out of my mind. Haha..so, watch out! ^_^
To tell you the truth. I’m bored. I submitted a few resumes to different companies and received no response. I mean, got some scheduled interviews but it's too urgent. Can't be rush. I still have lots of things to do before I will drawn myself to an actual battle with life. Ugh. I’m feeling so upset now. Omg. My happy thoughts, where have you gone? 

10 comments:

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling a bit down Mai, please don't be though. This is actually the start of something new, something beautiful. Sure it's tough to adapt to life after studies, I've had to deal with it way sooner than I expected to but once you get into things and get a job you'll stop feeling bored and realise that things aren't so bad, here's hoping so anyway. Don't get yourself killed either, we'd miss you around here!

No, no suicide, bad Mai, bad! It actually takes more strength to keep on living. As for what to do next, well that is something you have to work out, but you don't have to work it out immediately. Calm down, take the time, and think on it. You were so focused on graduating you forgot to think about what comes next. That's natural so just take the time to think on that now :)

I had that feeling too after leaving uni. The scheduled days filled with classes and dismissal times are gone. Also, more importantly to me, all the friends that I saw almost every day are out of reach when I go back home. It's enough to make a person cry, geez. (T_T)

It doesn't sting after a while though. Gotta remember that it's silly to think that life is over after you just got out of college!

I think we all had that feeling, a bit of fear of the unknown ! Just take it easy, one day at a time, you will surely find your way, you have plenty of time to get stressed ! I am sure everything is gonna be ok sweetie. Kisses