"God created the donkey & said to " joke

Hot 6 years ago

God created the donkey & said to him: " You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence & you will live 50 years. You will be a donkey. " The donkey answered: " I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is too much. Give me only 20 years. God granted his wish. God created the dog and said to him: "You will be a dog. " You will guard the house of man. You will be his best friend. You will eat the scraps that he gives you and you will live 25 years. You will be a dog. " The dog answered: " Sir, to live 25 years is too much, you give me only 10 years. God granted his wish. God created the Monkey and said to him: " You will be a monkey. " You will swing from branch to branch doing tricks. You will be amusing and you will live 20 years. You will be a monkey. " The monkey answered: " Sir, to live 20 years is too much, you give me only 10 years. God granted his wish. Finally God created the man and said to him: " You will be a man, the only rational creature on the face of the earth. " You will use your intelligence to become master over all animals. You will dominate the world and you will live 20 years. Man responded: " Sir, I will be a man but to live only 20 years is very little, give the 30 years that the donkey refused, the 15 years that the dog did not want and the 10 years the monkey refused. God granted his wish. And since then, man lives 20 years as a man, he marries and spend 30 years like a donkey, working and carrying all the burdens on his back. Then when his children are gone, he lives 15 years like a dog, taking care of the house and eating whatever is given to him, so that when he is old, he can retire and live 10 years like a monkey, going from house to house, from one son or daughter to another, doing tricks to amuse his grandchildren.

A team of archaeologists was excavating in Israel when they came upon a cave. Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols, in this order of appearance: A woman, a donkey, a shovel, a fish, and a Star of David.

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CHARLIE: IT WAS LONG BUT FUNNY

Prisca Sapientia: How many buttock imprints did this Balaam dude leave BEHIND (pun intended) by riding his ass to town? Did he invent the buttwalk or rather the original moonwalk? That man-invented holy fantasy book to which you refer has some hilarious passages. Riding one's ass to town must hurt like heck unless you've got buns o'steel. I'd rather walk upright than scoot along on my ass.

Prisca Sapientia: I would suggest the OP "joker" look in a mirror. Anyone who'd mistakenly try to conflate hostility, anxiety, anger and depression for a cheap shot blanket aspersion is the real azzhat in the room. Ask a shrink to explain terms such as temperament, coping skills, cognitive and social dysfunctions before jumping to a false conclusion. Type D's are often a very positive influence for pragmatic decision-making and rational, objective behavior. They can be blunt and candid, but that only annoys... azzhats.

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