Musings on the-forever-intertwined music, writing, and life. Canadian cellist, singer-songwriter, author, advocate and activist Alyssa Wright explores her creative world and ongoing journey from survivor of childhood sexual abuse to joy-filled Thriver.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Early(-ish) morning

I had to get up early today. OK, not early for most people, but early for yours truly. I have to edge the diabetic cat's injection time a bit early so I can do his meds before leaving for trio on Friday, plus the Rogers guy was coming in the morning to see why our internet was not working and I had to make his pathway to the modem and incoming cables a little less embarrassing. So... unlike most days, I was the first person up.

And, you know, if it weren't for that whole waking up part, I could certainly see the appeal of being a morning person. :-)

It's just not possible. I've tried, many times and many ways, to adjust my inner clock. Even as a little kid, I missed most of the Saturday morning cartoons, because I couldn't get up before 10:00 -- even Bugs Bunny at 11:00 was tricky most weeks. My greatest joy when I graduated high school was that I'd never have to wake up before the sun again. (Well, that assumption turned out to be faulty, but at least I didn't have to do it on a regular basis!) I have seen many beautiful sunrises, but the majority of them have come from staying up to see them. The couple of people who have tried to wake me to see the beautiful sunrise have been greeted with incoherent grunts and moans and the odd finger gesture. I am a living example of that Garfield cartoon "I don't do mornings."

So... no sunrise this morning. Hell is still just as unfrozen as it was yesterday. But there was morning light. And morning quiet.

I had the house to myself, in effect. Don was still fast asleep. The phone wasn't ringing, because we've got people well trained to not call before the crack of noon, when we've got some coffee into us. Couldn't check e-mail, because the internet was down and our neighbours' signal wasn't strong enough.

So I sat at the kitchen table. Drank coffee. Bathed in the morning sun like the well-fed cats on the floor. Immersed myself in my own thoughts. Ahhh... Nobody needed me. Nobody interrupted me. I was alone. Just me and the sunbeam.

There was much to do today. First, the internet had to get fixed -- the Rogers guy actually showed up over half an hour early (good thing I'd already put clothes on, rather than sat around in my PJs, as was my original impulse!), replaced the pooched modem and was out of the house before his scheduled earliest arrival time, or before Don even woke up. Then several loads of laundry, dealt with the incoming mail, cleaned up the kitchen and cat boxes, a bunch of other less-than-exciting but necessary small jobs. Later this afternoon, I was able to get back in touch with customer service for our database, and got that back up and running. In the middle, got a bunch of phone calls and e-mails and other chores done.

But... even though I was able to check off a lot of to-do boxes, it didn't seem like a frantically busy day.

There ya go.

Just as I was questioning the value of my morning meditation versus getting boxes checked off, life conspired to convince me to get my arse on that zafu. Not only am I having a better day (despite turmoil with technology), I'm also checking off more boxes. And that makes me happy, despite the fact I keep telling myself it shouldn't. :-)

Today's Tarot: 4 of Swords in my "works" -- take time to rest, recoup, regenerate. Done. The rest all pointed to new energy, big change, and digging deeper into the spiritual world. Done. Hey, I seem to be getting better at these cards.

2 comments:

So the only time in my life I have not been a morning person, and that includes childhood and everything in between then and now, was in the topsy turvy world down under where even the water spiraled backwards down the drain.