He never cared to take HIV MEDS . As I last heard him say " The pills are toobig to go down the pipe "

I am very sad to know a person that was fun , lively ,not a depressed fellow just decided to DIE rather than take HIV MEDS :(

I have known many many men to die of AIDS , before the new MEDS came out . I just have to wonder why ! WHY would a young man pretty much just kill himself ? I feel so very sad . Nothing I could have said would have changed his mind . The caseworker gave up :o I pray he passed without pain and has gone off to heaven . Lately I have felt like a walking corpse , But I do not want to die yet ! My numbers have been OK , Percentage a bit lower than it should be ? I have spent the past several days sleeping all day :-[ I go for blood work Monday , Hopefully things are OK . Guys that just give up ! , That just makes me wonder why I spend so much time to stay around and live a life of hell at times . Not all days are bad , but the amount of pain i endure is getting to the point that I may not want to continue ... Anyway , Pray for my friend Jackie ! He was a nice guy and should have lived a long life ! He never told his Mother ! They lived together ? Not sure how that played out .

Just feeling bad , Weasel :'(

Jeff G:
Hi Carl , Im so very sorry to hear about your friend ,these things take a toll so its no wonder you are feeling down . I have seen it before myself and felt so helpless and paralyzed when it dawned on me that I had to except it , that it was too late to turn back the time and regain his health .

I thank you for sharing this because people need to see it and understand that our mental health is just as important as our immune system .

We need you around here buddy so please get up and get back to living your life . Hugs ,

Joe K:
Hey Carl,

My deepest condolences on the loss of your friend. You ask how someone could just stop their meds and I think the answer depends upon how strong and prepared folks are, when the hard times hit. There are just so many things that can hit any of us and I believe that those of us who survive and even thrive, have structured our lives and abilities to make that happen.

I'm in the middle of a separation right now and stopping my meds has crossed my mind, more than once. I won't do it, simply because I've been working on myself to withstand such an assault. I didn't mean to hijack your thread, however there are many things that can drive someone to lose all hope.

Joe

LiveWithIt:
Very sad, sorry for your loss. Some people have pill swallowing phobias. My sister has it, it just stemmed from when she was a child refusing to swallow them. Luckily she doesn't have any illness where she needs to take them. If she ever does need a pill she will crush it up. Then one day it dawned on me, if she can swallow food, and can she ever, then she can swallow a pill, she is just afraid to.

Most pills can be crushed or cut into smaller pieces unless they are controlled release or there is some other specific reason that it has to be broken down by stomach acids. There are also some possible alternative such as maybe looking into a liquid version of the meds. Seems like he just gave up, so sad.

Elkan:
I am sorry for your loss. I am also feeling very worried or rather afraid. Every time i hear someone dying from hiv i will think about myself. I am just afraid that i might be defeated by hiv at any second :(