(Maybe they found another attractive young intern dead in his office.)

(You know who Joe Scarborough is, right? He is the Former Republican Congressman who had to leave office because one of his attractive young aides, Lori Klausutis, was found dead in his office under extremely suspicious circumstances. [ 1,2,3,4,5,6 ] Soon to have his own show on FOX News...?)

UPDATE: I was wrong. I was hoping that they were going to replace Morning Joe, but alas, I was wrong. **sigh**

This is why you should never trust the mainstream media! Clearly Gov. Mark Sanford has joined the long list of Republicans that switch parties to Democrat whenever they become unpopular with their party. It must be true, because I saw it on FOX News! The other networks just continue to keep up the lie that they are still Republicans, though. Curse you, Fourth Estate!

No time for blogging today! Some friends of mine and I are busy chasing the Ghost of Finnyan MacDuff. (I think that I can just make this stoplight... Hey, watch it buddy!) In the meantime, you can watch this swell video of "Me & Scooby-Doo Down By The Graveyard" by Captain Plaid & The Video Terrorists.(Ack! Fred found a clue, and Velma lost her glasses! That's a plot twist that I would never have seen coming...)

Never let it be said that I am one to hold a grudge. After resigning her previous position of state representative in disgrace, I am happy to say that Cynthia Davis has turned her life around and gotten new job that will insure that those lazy poor people don't get any more free food from her!

I would like to personally wish her the best of luck in her new position. I do feel that her new job is one that suits her disposition far better that her previous one. (And she gets discount meals, too!)

Hunger is indeed a positive motivator! And so are these delightful Happy Meal toys...

Filled with the most delightful baked goods that you can imagine! Bubs from the Sprawling Ramshackle Compound sent me this delicious box of bakery goodness for some photoshop work [ 1,2 ] that I did for his daughter. And it was all baked by the awesome blogger Jintrinsique!(Am I lucky or what?)

Thank you, Bubs! Thank you, Jintrinsique! I am not worthy of such rich, creamy culinary goodness, but I'm gonna eat it anyway! I am sending a telepathic blog bite of these delicious items out to each and every one of you. (Except the chocolate peanut butter cookies. I'm saving those for myself!)

Monday, June 22, 2009

In her June newsletter Republican State Representative Cynthia Davis tells you how she really feels about the poor. She states that the summer food program provided by the Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services is a waste of money, the malnourished in Missouri are actually obese, and any problem that might exist is being caused by poor people going out dinner instead of preparing good home cooked meals.

Her articles is delivered in a "point-counterpoint" style. She pulls quotes from the report fromt he Missouri Department of Health and Senior Services, and then delivers her own comments on them. For example, the subtitle of article states: "Current economic woes make Summer Food Service Program more important than ever. Program provides nutritious meals to young people throughout the state," and Rep. Davis counters:

The implication suggests that during a recession, parents don't give their children nutritious food. The reverse may be true. During hard times, many families find it even more important to pull together. Families may economize by choosing to not waste hard earned dollars on potato chips, ice cream, or Twinkies. Perhaps some families will buy more beans and chicken and less sweets.

That's the ticket! If only the lazy underfed would stop eating all of those potato chips, ice cream, and Twinkies!

"Anyone under 18 can be eligible? Can't they get a job during the summer by the time they are 16? Hunger can be a positive motivator. What is wrong with the idea of getting a job so you can get better meals?"

"Tip: If you work for McDonald's, they will feed you for free during your break."

Yes, she really said that. And workers at McDonalds don't get free food, the get a discount - if they can get a job there. And if they are over 16.

Are you hungry, and only 9 or 10 years old? Just wait a few more years! Maybe you can get a job at a fast food restaurant when you are older!

This little nugget was interesting. She starts out saying that probably no one in Missouri is actually hungry, it must be some kind of myth. Then she zig zags into saying that the problem is really obesity, that the malnourished in Misouri must be obese:

"While nobody is disputing the benefits of nutritious food, why the presumption that parents are not providing nutritious food for their children? Even if they are not, who created a new rule that says government must make up for any lack at home? The problem of childhood obesity has been cited as one of the most rapidly growing health problems in America. People who are struggling with lack of food usually do not have an obesity problem. Click here to read about obesity."

The link directs you to a video, which I presume you must read as she directs you to do, instead of watch.

Rep. Davis indicates that those lazy unemployed people can just stop eating out:

Most parents put their children first, even ahead of themselves no matter what. If parents are laid off, that doesn't mean they stop feeding their children, at least not any of the parents I know. Laid off parents could adapt by preparing more home cooked meals rather than going out to eat.

One might argue that preparing a home cooked meal on zero dollars can be a bit challenging. The statistics indicate that One in five children in Missouri currently live in hunger. I seriously doubt that the problem is being caused by poor people going out dinner instead of preparing home cooked meals. I think they would probably love some home cooked meals.

"The right way to solve this is with more education. If the problem is that parents do not know how to serve nutritious meals, let's help them learn how to do that."

So the answer is clear! Poor people are hungry because they are stupid and Uneducated. Food has nothing to do with it!

I'm willing to bet that none of Clown Car Christian Conservative Cynthia Davis's kids are are malnourished or living in poverty. And if they were, I am sure that she would gratful for any assistance she could get to feed them.

At the end of the article she has a section called "A Little Bit of Humor" with a joke called "Chronic Laziness":

The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me?"

"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."

"Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."

Get it? One in five children in Missouri currently live in hunger because poor people are lazy. What a hoot!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Last night on Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow they played Obama's speech at the Radio and Television Correspondents' Association dinner, as well as that of the keynote speaker, John Hodgeman.

In case you missed it, click on the links below to watch 26 minutes of awesome! Hodgeman feels that Obama might be the Quizat Haderach, and he very convincingly compared the Obama victory over the GOP to the film Revenge of the Nerds!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

I am afraid that I have been remiss in my blog meme duties as of late, and I intend to start making up for that in the comng weeks. (I haven't forgotten about Splotchy's story meme, Liberality.)

The Dardos Award is described thus: An award given for recognition of cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values transmitted in the form of creative and original writing. These stamps were created with the intention of promoting fraternization between bloggers, a way of showing affection and gratitude for work that adds value to the Web.

I am going to change the rules slightly in this one case, and bestow these Dardos Awards on some great blogger artists. I'm not talking about the neferious gang of tweakers of pixels and collage makers (like myself) who spend our time on the computer chopping off famous people's heads and putting them on other people's bodies.

I'm talking about the bloggers that actually use pencil and paper, pen and ink, and the more traditional tools of the trade. These are some of my favorite blogger artists.

Now here are the rules:1) Accept the award by posting it on your blog along with the name of the person that has granted the award and a link to his/her blog.

2) Pass the award to another five blogs that are worthy of this acknowledgment, remembering to contact each of them to let them know they have been selected for this award.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Rusty DePass, a prominent S.C. Republican Party activist, longtime SCGOP activist and former State Senate candidate posted a highly-questionable comment on an innocuous Facebook update about the escape of a Western Lowlands Gorilla from Columbia's Riverbanks Zoo. Pam's House Blend

Friday, June 12, 2009

When I first heard that the pscho white-supremacist hate monger James Von Brunn was 89 years old, the first thing I did was call my mom and tell her that she had not excuse for not going out and making new friends or getting on the internet anymore. I mean, this guy was a lot older than she is, and he was networking on the internet and going out to museums and meeting new people and everything!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

President Obama was born in the far flung foreign land of Hawaii, so he is not a natural born American citizen. But no matter! With the aid of his ever-present teleprompter and his keen fascist instincts, the president is going to raise your taxes and take your guns away!

With the aid of the eugenics of embryonic stem cell research and abortion rights, Obama will finally create a socialist master race through the science of birth control and media manipulation!

Using the the Edward M. Kennedy Serve America Act, Obama shall create his own version of the Hitler Youth. The law shall force America's youth into mandatory national coercive servitude. Using their slave labor, the president will indoctrinate them to marginalize Christianity and destroy the American way of life!

And we haven't even begun to talk about how the president plans to destroy the economy, socialize medicine and target Republican Chrysler dealers for closure! It's all true... I read it here.

Monday, June 08, 2009

Our local paper has a feature where readers can call in and leave a message about any subject that they feel that they would like to broadcast to the world. They are printed without any name or identification. These were the comments that the newspaper ran on Friday. They are fairly representative of what is usually run in this feature.

Just Right

As a matter of fact, Rush Limbaugh is a good citizen because he does indeed listen to both sides. He gives credit to any idea he considers good for the country. He criticizes any idea he considers harmful, no matter what party is the originator.

Lady Problem

The lady judge soon to be installed on the Supreme Court is a dedicated anti-gun activist. This is your president setting up the court so they can take away your guns. Notice how our liberal news media don’t tell about this so it will go through without a problem.

Believe It

I wonder how many people who voted for change wanted the change we are getting today. The American people are going to be put in the poor house by this administration. It’s going to come down to where the government is going to be so big that they are going to tax you even if you grow a little garden. I hope the people who voted for change, I sure hope this wasn’t the change you wanted.

It is interesting to note that although this town voted 51% for Obama in the presidential election, pro-Obama comments never seem to make it into this feature.

I thought that this one was kind of interesting as well:

Ham It Up

Well, I see on the local television station there was a big grant given to the city to fix their emergency communication vehicle not only for the city but for the county. None of the ham operators have been communicated with, although federal statute requires that ham operators be involved in emergency communications by statute of law. It’s about time the ham operators who stand ready to help were contacted and we could get to do something.

I'm sure that this is somehow Obama's fault as well... (Does ham radio count as pork?)

My RSVP to the purveyors of theBing-a-thon event on Hulu: As much as I like to see aspiring actresses wearing necklaces made out of wieners, I am afraid that I shall be unable to attend due to a previous engagment. I am sorry that I shall not be able to participate in the Microsoft sponsored Bing-a-thon "Shenanigans", and look foreward with great interest in the next "wacky-but-endearing pop culture reference" career move of the aforementioned actress...

Further evidence of the coming of the Great Apeocolypse! Every Saturday afternoon a Los Angelos art gallery hosts a weekly life drawing class at the La Cita bar. From 3-8 p.m. the models are released from a backstage holding cell, who then pose in bikinis and gorilla masks for the patrons to sketch. (You are supposed to bring your own art materials.) The evidence is irrefutable!

Dr. Zira, I must caution you. Experimental brain surgery on these creatures is one thing, and I'm all in favor of it. But to suggest that we can learn anything about the simian nature from a study of man is sheer nonsense. Man is a menace, a walking pestilence. He eats up his food supply in the forest, then migrates to our green belts and ravages our crops. The sooner he is exterminated, the better. It's a question of simian survival.