We are proud to be part of the AFFIRM network of churches joining with others to declare ourselves to be fully inclusive of people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. All are welcome here.

Humans of Canadian Memorial: Hannes and Lonnie

Hannes: I grew up Dutch-Reformed, my Grandfather was a reverend, and we lived in a small community where everyone went to church. And then I was drawn to an evangelical church. They had an ex-gay ministry there to help people change from being gay to being straight. And that’s how Lonnie and I met in 2005: we were at a Living Waters Conference together and I was a small group facilitator and he was doing the music. We became really good friends just in that week and when he went back to Canada we stayed in contact.

Lonnie: I was born and baptized Catholic but my mom was United and tried to embrace Catholicism but couldn’t do it. So we didn’t’ really go to church. But I was pretty spiritual as a kid and found my way to the Pentecostal Church and that’s when I eventually became a music pastor. But it became too rigid and legalistic and eventually ended up at an Alliance church. And that’s when I wasn’t able to maintain the integrity of my sexuality. I wasn’t buying it anymore, the idea that you can live as a healthy heterosexual even though you have all these gay inclinations. Leaving was the best thing because I needed to get out and figure out my theology and sexuality. It was a wonderful emancipation.

Hannes: When I went to work on a cruise ship as a photographer, I suddenly saw all these people that have come from all over the world with different beliefs. I became really good friends with so many of them. The love that I felt for them, I thought, surely God feels the same and more. I couldn’t see how God would send them all to hell. And when I came back to Cape Town, that’s when the coming out process happened for me. But then I didn’t think there could be a place for me in the church and I didn’t see a need for it. But when we came to Canadian Memorial, and they said “everyone is welcome” I said “Oh my gosh, I am truly welcomed here”.

Lonnie: I found the choir and the church to be very receptive and there was a vibrancy. What I sensed was a sincere curiosity of spirituality and openness to other ideas including a gospel way of expression. And I thought “What? The UCC is actually spiritually hungry?” So when we sing these songs, I love the sense that we can become open to more things. So now, for me, going to church is enjoyable. It used to be a lot of work, a lot of pressure. People were coming to worship to meet with Jesus. And I have to facilitate that. You want to do things that are appealing and that resonate with people but by no means do I feel responsible for making things happen for anyone. And I always go away being surprised at how I connect at a heart level, in a way I didn’t expect to.