READY AS WE WILL EVER BE...

In the elevator on our way to be induced January 5th 2010, 7:00 AM.

We are looking at each other wondering if we are really ready for this... Not knowing the journey that really lie ahead...

One year ago today at 4:00 PM, I went in for a check up with the midwife. I was two centimeters dilated. The midwife and I came to the conclusion that I would deliver naturally. After I left the appointment, she spoke with the doctor and due to the placental abruption the doctor wanted me to be monitored during labor; therefore, an induction would be scheduled for 7:15 AM on January 5th. My due date was not until the 20th!

As I was driving home, my phone rings. It is the midwife. She tells me about the decision to induce. I panicked, pulled over in the big lots parking lot and hyperventilated. I needed a few more weeks to prepare. I was not ready to deliver a baby in 12 hours. I called several people to tell them, including my mom who frantically booked a $1000 dollar plane ticket to Michigan. She was scheduled to arrive at 1:30 PM the next day, January 5th. She had plenty of time to get there, right? So we thought.....

I drove home with one of those weird expressions on my face. It was a combination of shock and while trying to hide a smile. I was excited but nervous. I walked into the house and Scott was building a fire in the fireplace. I went up to him and in a low voice said, “Honey....” He said, We are going to have a baby?”

I said, “Yes, are we ready?”

He said, “Ready as we will ever be.” And we hugged.

We hugged by the light of the fire not knowing what our future held, not knowing if we were ready to be parents, and most definitely not knowing the challenges that lie ahead of us.

Induction scared the ba-jeebies out of me. LITERALLY

At 3:15 that morning I awoke to sharp cramping avery 4 minutes. At 4:15 I got up and decided to take the worlds longest shower figuring it was going to be my last relaxing one for a while. I had a contraction timer downloaded on my computer. During my 30 minute shower I would reach out of the shower to start and stop the contraction timer. They were three minutes apart. I decided to do my hair and makeup again knowing it was going to be a long while before I could dress myself up - not knowing that it would be a long while before I ever cared to dress myself up.

I was all ready to go to the hospital at 6 AM, looking like a million bucks! My contractions were getting stronger, just a few minutes apart. We debated about going to the induction early but I told Scott just to wait until 6:45 and we would head then. I needed to time let reality set it!

Once we arrived to the hospital, I told the midwife not to give me pitocin, I wanted to see if I would progress naturally. She checked me and I was 4 centimeters dilated already, and hey, I was in the running to have the New Years baby....Yes on January 5th! Another gal and I raced to the 10 centimeter finish line, but she ended up beating me by a half hour with a c-section. The other bit of bad news, my race to 10 centimeters was so short that Maddox was born at 12:02 PM......1.5 hours BEFORE mom was supposed to arrive. So yeah, that really expensive plane ticket and the pilot still did not fly fast enough.

12:02 PM January 5th, this is where it all began, or ended, not so sure. All I can say is that the last 365 days were home to some of the worst days of my life. I am not even sure if I can say that some of the best days were included in there. I know that is a bold statement, but I promise, there were way better things that have happened to me in this lifetime and 2010 was not the year.

Needless to say, I was feeling pretty crummy today as I relived the events of last January 4th. I walked into the door of my home after work and I saw Maddox. She was clapping and busing up hysterically.