“Chicago Fire” recap (1.16): “Come on, be realistic.”

Previously in Chicago Fire Dawson made a deal with the devil to catch the guy who shot her brother but her end of the bargain is that she has to date either boring guy A) Candidate Peter Mills or B) Matthew “personality of a baked potato” Casey. Shay and Clarice made googly eyes at a very cute baby and worried that Daniel would use the fact that Clarice once took some Prozac to get his baby back, baby back, baby back. Casey and his mom were locked in a battle of teen angst and parole, which is also the name of a new show replacing Jersey Shore. Severide won his break-up by finding out that his ex-fiancee is now a stripper and celebrated by making a crib for his lesbian roommates. Rock ‘n roll, Severide. Rock ‘n roll.

Casey’s leaving in the morning and his mom hands him a travel cup of coffee that she hopes will make him forget about telling her she had to find a new home. Mama Casey spots her parole office getting out of her car and bolts for the back door because she was up to something no good the night before and if the PO tests her, it will show up. So she does what every teenager would do and asks Casey to make something up. He talks to the parole officer about how his mom has gone for a walk, at 7:00 a.m., in Chicago, in a month ending in -ary. Yeah she doesn’t buy his bullshit but he’s off to be Super Casey, saver of kittens up trees so he doesn’t have a choice but come back and try to catch mom another time.

Back at the firehouse Shay bombs into the meeting room where Clarice is chatting with their lawyer. She apologizes for being late but she’s busy saving lives so sometimes she’s not as punctual as she’d like to be. Clarice says that Daniel rejected the offer of joint custody and the lawyer launches into all the reasons why Shay and Clarice don’t look like perfect parents on paper. The lawyer calls Clarice a “switch hitter” who only was with Daniel to get pregnant before ditching him for a woman with a time-consuming and hazardous job. Then she has the audacity to say that it doesn’t look good for them to live with a “skirt chaser.” The lawyer says she sorry to have to be the voice of bigotry but if they would just act like a “normal” family, her job would be so much easier. Shay’s pissed because it’s way too early for someone to be calling her abnormal. But because she’s Shay and possibly the most mature person on the show, she says they’ll get a place of their own and do whatever it takes to keep little Wesley. Before they can flesh out that plan she’s called out to her time-consuming and hazardous job.

The call is to a fire and the crew gets the family out only to have the little girl yell that Lassie is still inside. Cruz hops from one ladder to the other like a burly Spider Man and goes up to find Fido. He hears a dog barking and launches himself through the window into the burning building. He finds the dog, who scampers out the front door while Cruz gets knocked to the floor by a beam. Of course now everyone has to go in a save Cruz. Mouch, Herrmann, and Casey go in and find Cruz. As they are leaving the floor erupts in flames and Mouch is trapped on the wrong side. Not to worry, they toss Gollum and the ring into the fire and Mouch is able to run out with the rest. When they get out of the building Casey, Mouch, and Herrmann are pissed and refuse treatment from Dawson. Cruz has a burn around his wrist and the Chief tells him he has to go to the hospital to have it checked out. The team barely looks at Cruz as he tries to assuage his guilt over letting Flaco die by looking at the dog he rescued and imagining he’s redeemed himself.

Back at the firehouse Severide asks Whaley how Renee is doing after she swallowed a mess of pills last week and landed in the hospital. Whaley says his sister won’t talk to him but is on 72- hour hold in the psych unit, so you know, captive audience for Severide.

Dawson wants to know how long Casey is going to freeze her out. He’s like, “What do you mean, I’m not freezing you out. Oh look there’s any other person in the world I could talk to except for you. TTFN!”

Dawson, Otis, and Herrmann are sitting around the table chatting about the bar. Otis is torqued that Dawson is on bad terms with Casey because it means he’s going to have to learn how to do tape drywall. Dawson’s like “Screw you dude, taping drywall is a hell of a lot more interesting than talking to Casey.” They talk about what to name the bar, Otis wants to name it Moustache Pete’s and Dawson wants to name it Solstice, Persuasion, or Sapphic Tendencies but the boys don’t go for it.

I would rather tape drywall with my teeth than talk to Matthew Casey.

Shay and Severide meet up in the hallway, per usual. These two walk and talk like they are Josh Lyman and Donna Moss. Severide is all “thanks for getting me mixed up with my ex-fiancee, now she’s in a psych ward.” Shay points out that she’s in a psych ward because she needs help and frankly it’s not about him all the time. Donna tries to tell Josh that she’s going to move out of their place and into the the lezzie loft with Clarice but she’s called out before she can finish her thought.

Casey finds Mouch who reminds Casey about a chat they had about their buddy Cruz. Mouch is mad that Casey told him that Cruz was fine and that Mouch should mind his own business. Mouch asks Casey if he can handle Cruz or if Mouch needs to talk to the Chief.