Sunday, December 27, 2009

I took one of my favorite pictures ever this weekend.My parents have developed a hobby of antique-ing. They go to antique stores on a regular basis apparently. While they were visiting Greg's, of course, they had to see the antique stores they haven't been to yet.By the way, I'm not complaining.I had fun.Cause I like to take pictures.:-)A couple of the stores had antique cameras. And I thought they were SO cool.Therefore, I took pictures of them.And this one is my favorite:

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Today I went to the Children's Museum with my brother, his wife, and their kids. I honestly can't remember the last time I went. I was quite probably a child, actually. Luckily, though, it's an interesting place for everyone, not just people under the age of twelve. And after a lot of thinking, and also some other previous thoughts, I've decided it's because we're all still partly kids somewhere deep down inside. Some people have a more dominant kid, but most of us never really grow out of that desire to see and think about things from a child's perspective, a child's heart. I remember when school was so much fun. I remember when I loved to think and figure things out. I remember when I loved, loved to learn. Well, I'm still that way. I just forget it sometimes. I think I really forgot that this semester. So many teachers aren't interested in teaching us how to learn. They seem to interested in teaching us how to produce a certain answer. I think the most important thing you can ever learn is how to learn. That's why I want to be a teacher. Not very many people know that I realllly want to be a teacher. When you can expand somebody's brain, it's one of the coolest things ever. That's another thing about teachers. So many of them aren't interested in expanding students' brains. It's common to try to create cookie-cutter brains. "This is how you should think. This is what you should do. This is what you shouldn't do. This is where you should go. This and that and this and that. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." You know, I don't care much about engineering, to be truthful... But I still love learning, when I try to learn. For a lot of the time since this September, I wasn't focused on learning and thinking and growing. I've been focused on surviving. I hate "surviving." I love living. Have you ever noticed just how ALIVE children are? This is why I like to think that somewhere inside I'm still that kid that I was just a short while ago. The older people get, the more they tend to die. Money gets tight, and a little bit of you inside starts to die. Parents misunderstand you, and a little bit of you inside starts to die. You don't meet expectations, so you end up disappointing other people and even yourself, so a little bit of you inside starts to die. We're always dying. Why can't we just live? Maybe because... It hurts. It's hard. But it's still what I want. It's worth it. When living is fun, when your heart and soul and spirit are thriving and healthy... That's when life seems right. Some of the most wonderful times are those times when I feel like my flesh is here simply BECAUSE my soul is. Then, those times when my body is just dragging my soul around because it has to... those are the times that hurt. And of course there are always both. This is just how life works. Ups and downs of course. But I want my soul to be more alive than my body. I think that's how people start out. I think that's the very alive part that I see in children. Their bodies are so filled with life because their souls are so filled with life. I feel like I must clarify though. There's a big, big difference in being "childlike" and being "childish." Childlike is a much more positive term. Childish seems more to me like the characteristics of being selfish and stubborn. Undesireable traits. Immaturity, inconsideration, outbursts of temper, etc. But childlike... Childlike is more along the lines of simplistic. Spontaneous. Ideal. Good. Pure. Hopeful. Healthy. Heartwarming. I hope that makes sense. Anyway, so I guess my point is that going to the museum today reminded me of how fun it was to be a child. How fun and wonderful thinking and learning can be. Life and learning don't have to be chores and drills. It's so much more. It's my goal to re-learn how to live life like a child. Because I know for certain there's still that kid. Somewhere. Somewhere in my heart. Longing to be restored. Somewhere.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Sunday, November 8, 2009

How many times have I written about wanting to give up? I don't know, but I can positively tell you that it hasn't been even a tenth of the times I've contemplated and longed to give up. School gets hard, life gets frustrating, and I simply want to give up. So today I started wondering why this is my default.Why do I desire to give up when circumstances seem stronger than me? How amazing would it be if I had a yearning to be stronger, to work harder, to do that much more, rather than trying to do less? Trials and struggles are a calling to grow, not to shrink. It isn't my place to run from difficulties. It isn't my place to present myself as a weaker being when I'm frustrated or under pressure. It's my job to push back at my circumstances.When a surface has a large weight on it and that weight increases, the surface is intended to increase its reactionary force. The earth's normal force increases when jump up and down instead of just standing. When I stomp my feet and try to break through the surface of the earth, it just meets my force with a force of its own that's just as strong. The earth is stronger than me. It's supposed to be. In the same manner, I'm SUPPOSED to be stronger than the pressures surrounding me. Not only am I supposed to be that way, I actually am.

I AM STRONGER.

And I don't have to cave under the situations that make me want to crawl into bed and stay there until everything's better. That wouldn't even make everything better anyway.Things have a tendency to get worse when left alone. To think that I could run away from life with hopes that it would improve is utterly ridiculous. That wouldn't happen. Things would only get worse. But I don't have to hide away and leave life to take care of itself, because I'm bigger than I often let myself believe.I'm bigger, because I trust in God. I'm bigger because God is bigger. I'm stronger, because God is stronger, and His strength lives in me. And I think He's trying to get me to see this. I've heard three lessons today about trusting God. Three. Today. The first was the sermon this morning in church. It was about going through painful times, and still trusting God. That even when life and circumstances hurt, God has a plan for us and works all things together for His name.The second was in Sunday school when we talked about anxiety, which is failing to trust God in times when we aren't even sure if we can take care of ourselves. Anxiety is trying to take things out of God's hands and control them on our own. Clearly, this is a bad decision. God has so much more power than I do. Why would I ever hope to do anything better than He could do it? Many people say that it's because we think God is too small. I think those people are wrong.Personally, I get stressed out when I think God is too big. When I think I'm too small for such a big God to care about the things that feel overwhelming to me. My problems aren't too big for God. God is too big for my problems. My problems are definitely big enough for me to worry about. But God? Maybe they're not big enough for Him.When I feel like my world would fall apart if my problems weren't resolved in the way I expect, that's when I get worried. God's world wouldn't fall apart. Mine would. Why should He be concerned about them?Why? Because He loves me. What matters to me matters to him. And right now, it matters to me that I'm an engineering student. It also matters to me that I don't really know why I'm here. It matters to me that I'm wondering about my future and my purpose.Here's the thing, though: if GodISmy world, my world can't fall apart. No matter what I'm going through. When God is my everything, I have no reason to doubt. I have no reason to be afraid. All I can be is grateful. And that's what the third lesson was about today - a grateful heart.Being grateful is when I've trusted that God has provided me with what I truly need. Appreciating what I have. Believing that my past and present are good enough and just what He knows is best for me. Being grateful for both the circumstances and the provisions.I'm not sure how all of this really fits together, but I do know God is moving through it. God is speaking to me, teaching me, and it's time for me to listen up. I know I have a reason here. I know He has a purpose for me. And I am certain that HE is strong enough to make ME strong enough.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

So here's the thing: the hot and cold water in the bathroom at my apartment are backwards. Even though the right knob has a blue dot, and the left knob has a red dot. Red SHOULD indicate hot, but, ya know, this time it doesn't. Anyway, with this whole reverse thing, I've gotten used to the left knob producing cold water and the right hot. Because of this, when I use public restrooms, I still have the tendency to turn on the left knob... Then I get soap... Then I spread the soap over my palms and the backs of my hands... And so on... What this means is the hot water has plenty of time to get... HOT. Since I'm used to the other side being hot, I don't expect to get scalded when I put my hands under the water to rinse off the soap. However, I do. And this is a true story. Maybe I should just stop using public restrooms forever. Then I can just use my backwards little sink without worrying about getting burnt.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

So, I got realllllllly sick yesterday. Extremely sick. And I didn't do any of my homework. Or go to class. I didn't even get out of bed to go to the clinic until roughly 4p.m. The doctor told me I should have gone in earlier so they could give me some fluids. It doesn't matter though, because I'm mostly fine now. I skipped class again today, though, and I feel really bad about it. However, every time I stand up and try to walk around, I remember why I stayed home, lounging on the couch.I think that's all I have to say. Except that I might read the Harry Potter books. And that I'm really awful at coming up with names for my blogs.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

You're not going to approve of this post. But... it's very much how I feel right now.

I hate school. I'm not a good student. I don't belong in college...I know I'm smart. And do I enjoy learning. But there are also many other ways to learn. I can't do this the way most people do.Homework doesn't work for me. I had an assignment due last week that I didn't finish. I have one due tomorrow that I don't possibly have time to finish. I had one due this morning that I didn't know was due this morning, which obviously means I didn't finish it. And these are all for the same class.Tests don't really work for me. You usually have to do homework and/or studying to do well on tests. I think I've established that I don't really do either...I'm ready to give up. I don't even feel that accomplished when I get good grades. But when I don't get good grades I feel like such a failure. I don't even have to fail to feel like a failure. Just getting a B is bad enough.It's like a lose-lose situation. Nothing about going to class and getting judged on my performance makes me feel good. Ever.And I just wish I could quit.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Disgusting reasons to not go to the Kroger down the road, especially after dark, not that daylight actually helps any... but still:

1. The Mexican guy who stared me up and down with a nasty and embarrassing (for me, that is) grin/snarl on his face. I almost threw up.2. The. Freaking. ROACH! in the bathroom. I almost threw up.

That's really all I need. Honestly. Actually, just the second one is the only reason I need. Roaches are the nastiest things in existence. I think proof can be found in the fact that Lysol, which is intended to extinguish germs, kills roaches almost instantaneously. They're like giant, visible, creepy, crawly, naaaaaassssty germs. GAAAGGGGGGG!

Monday, September 7, 2009

If you're reading this, you probably already know what I'm about to say... But I'll say it anyway.

I'm very much a people person. I mean, sometimes I really do like my alone time or quiet time, but mostly when I'm with people, I'm happy. Happier than when I'm doing homework. Happier than when I'm reading. Happier than when I'm studying. Basically my point is that I'm better at being a people person than I am at being a student. I'm really pretty much a terrible student, actually. Sure, I'm relatively smart, but that doesn't automatically make you a good student. Ask the guy in my graduating class who got the highest SAT score but wasn't even in the top ten percent.

Sometimes I wish I was an outstanding student. The one who always does all their work to the very best of their abilities ahead of time. Re-reads and re-writes. Studies for every quiz and exam. But I just can't bring myself to the conclusion that I'm that kind of person. Now, there are times I work hard and times I study, but unfortunately academics aren't my main focus when I'm at school. People are.

Friday I was asked what some of my goals in life are, and my automatic response was to impact the people around me. That somehow my outlook on life will effect others'. I hadn't even thought intentionally about it; simply said what came straight from my heart.

I have a passion for people, but sometimes I worry if it gets in the way of the balance I should have in my life and priorities. I definitely think it can be balanced. I just don't know if I've found that balance yet.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

This has been a very eventful weekend. I visited my family in east Tennessee, got to ride a motorcycle for the first time and loooooved it.Then... Greg, Ashley, and I went to visit Ian.Ian is a counselor at Boxwell this summer. He works with lots of other males at Boyscout camp. Most of these guys (the counselors) don't see females for extended periods of time. They work at a boyscout camp. So, as a relatively good-looking young woman, when I got onto the camp grounds, the gentlemen were very... very friendly. Particularly this one guy - Duckyboy. When we got there, Ian told us that we could go rappelling down the giant tower they have. This tower is the tallest building in the county.Anyway, so as soon as I decided to rappel, Duckyboy offers to help me put on my harness. Considering I didn't know how to put it on, since it's not like the ones we use to rock climb, I accepted. He told me his name was Kyle, but everyone calls him Duck.Why?My last name is Duckworth.Oh. Okay. Thanks for the help.Noo problem.So I make my way up the fourteen thousand flights of stairs, and Blake (cute, friendly, not overbearing counselor) sets up my rappel and belay ropes. I slowly lean out over ledge so I can begin rappelling. It took me forever the first time. I was frightened. Finally make my way to the bottom of the tower.

...Slowly...

and untie the ropes. Duckyboy comes over, takes the metal pieces off my harness and questions whether I'll do it again or not. Insists that I do. Puts the metal pieces back onto my harness. Talks about Texas. Asks which part I'm from. Says something about moving there... I climb back up to the top of the tower. Rappel much more quickly this time. Untie my own ropes. Belay off. Rappel off. Done. Join Ian, Ashley, Greg, Duckyboy, and the other counselors. Duckyboy takes the metal pieces off my harness again. Accidentally touches the one that's scalding hot from the friction. Burns himself. Smooth. Then he begins to try and burn other counselors with it so it's funny and he's showing off instead of just looking like an idiot. Yeah... Like that helped.Since Ian wants to show Greg, Ash, and I around camp, we leave that area. As we're walking off, Ian says, "Glad ya got to experience Duck hitting on you. I knew he would pounce on you as soon as he saw you." Pounce. What a nice word. Greg and I have been using it in our discussions on MMA. Mixed Martial Arts. Extreme fighting. Pounce - to swoop down suddenly and grasp, as a bird does in seizing its prey. Pounce and prey go together.So we walk around the camp, go to the trading post, lots of good stuff. As we get back to the parking lot, guess who's in the process of moving his car... Oh wait... His minivan. His deteriorating, dilapidated, 1999, ghetto, pimped out MINIVAN. Yeah! It was Duckyboy. And his music is blaring way loud. Ian says he's glad Duck continues to show off for me. While we walk back to the car, Greg stays behind me so as to protect me from the stare. And then... when we drive off... oh man.....Um... Just make sure from now on that anytime you stare at something in motion, follow ALL the way through. Follow with the eyes until they can't move any further. Then follow through with the head. Until your neck can't turn anymore. Then follow through with your whole body. And you can easily keep rotating until the object of your gawking is out of sight. Oh, and make sure you're sporting a creepy, stalkerish grin. It totally puts the finishing touch on the stare.

Speaking of finishing touches... Today, Ian texted Ashley with news that Duckyboy wants my number. Lol. Riiiiight. Apparently, Ian told him I have a boyfriend. Greg searched for Duckyboy on facebook. Found him. FRIEND REQUESTED HIM. No joke. I do believe he'll send hate mail. He's mentioned beating him down numerous times. I don't think I actually have to worry about this creepy stalker Duckyboy. It was pretty funny though. Greg and Ash keep bringing it up. They called me Brianna Duckworth. We decided it just doesn't have that ring.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Summer's funny. Because I have trouble keeping up with what day it is.Today one of my friends told me she was headed home from camp, and my automatic response was, "Wait, you're not supposed to leave until Friday." Then I realized it actually is Friday.I've worked out every single day this week. At least once. Two or three times in some cases.I. Am. Worn. Out.

End of story.So. I'm'a post my picture and go to sleep.

There are so many corn fields around here. And the sky was pretty. So I took a picture of this little wavy section. Ashley thinks Greg and I are weird for noticing details like this.

Man, I wish I was as funny as Lisa. Her blogs are so funny. Sometimes I feel lame. Now is one of those times. Heh.. Going to bed now. K, bye.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Today is my sister's birthday. She turned 24. On June 24th. I miss her. I love her.

On a different note, I have another new picture today.

I love it. :-)That's why I'm blogging about it.

I love the fire hydrants around here. Hazel Green, Alabama.Some of them are red. Some of them are yellow.And some of them, like this gorgeous one, are both!

I saw this thing on the way home from my first deep water workout at the gym this morning, and decided to stop on the side of Pulaski Pike to take some pictures. It's a pretty busy road, but if you know me very well, you might already know that doesn't bother me. I like to make my own plans and decisions, and sometimes, "danger" is no factor. I'd rather get hurt conquering my fears than allow them to run my life.

But anyway, today was a good day. I went and worked out, took this picture (and many others) then came home and mowed. Very productive. I got things accomplished. And my back is actually NOT what's making me tired this time. Amazing. I enjoy this feeling. I'll try to keep it up.Oh, I also applied for a job. Sports Authority. Woohoo... Hopefully if I get an interview I'll make a better impression than Lisa did at Buckle. But I don't have to worry about whether or not I like to keep up with the latest fashions.

So, yep, that was my day. I had fun writing this blog. Maybe this is why people do it. :]

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

That's me. I am a blogging failure. I've had a blog for months now, and I only have five posts.

People create such beautiful posts. They use beautiful words. They use beautiful formatting. They use beautiful pictures. They have beautiful ideas. They have beautiful everything!

And yeah, I have pictures... but I don't really know how to blog with them.I'll try it out though.Here's my picture of the day. I took it in Chattanooga when I went to the aquarium with my family. Including Lisa.I thought this little "Grille" was cute. I figured it could look pretty cool with an old-fashioned tint. Hopefully I accomplished what I was aiming for.Personally, I like it.That's why I'm blogging about it.:-)

Ashley's brother, Ian, tells me there are tons of beautiful buildings in Chattanooga that he'd love to take pictures of in the sunset. We're gonna go back up there one day in July, and I'm so excited.

Ya know, I'm not even sure what a blog is for. I guess it's to give someone a glimpse of who you are, whether they know you or not, whether theysee you everyday or not. To permanently keep a piece of you. A piece of life.Well, in any case, that's my goal.

And to elaborate on my failurity, I can't for anything seem to make this blog look like I want it to! Two paragraphs are supposed to be beside the picture. It looks like I want it to when I preview it, but when I post it, everything changes. Failure. But, whatever, I'm happy that I actually wrote a new blog.

Monday, May 18, 2009

I don't miss it. Actually, I do... I miss what it used to be to me. But it could never be now what it was before I left. I don't really know why. I've changed. Crosby's changed. It's not my home anymore. Do I even have a "home" anymore? I feel like I don't. My life is at school. School is over. My family is scattered. My dad is in Indiana. My mom is in Beaumont. Well, til the beginning of next month. Then she's leaving too. My summer is in Alabama. My heart... I don't really even know where it is anymore. I guess it's hiding, waiting. I don't know what it's waiting for, but I think I'm ready to find out. This year has been pretty lame... Mr. Bird even said so. I've met a few people. I've gone a few places. I've done a few things. But nothing very big. Nothing life changing. Nothing really momentous. I'm ready for a life-defining moment. Something HUGE. I want a story to tell.

Psychoanalyze Yourself:Don't read ahead, just copy and paste the following into a new bulletin before you read my answers. Then answer the following questions one at a time without looking ahead with the first thought that comes to mind. Then read what each answer means at the end.

1. You are walking in the woods. Who is walking with you?I'm alone.

2. You are walking in the woods. You see an animal. What kind of animal?wild cat

3. What interaction takes place between you and the animal?we stare at each other

4. You walk deeper in the woods. You enter a clearing, and before you is your dream home, how big is it?just big enough

5. Is your dream house surrounded by a fence?lol - no way

6. You enter the house. You walk into the dining room and see the dining table. What's there?crystal glasses and white dishes at each seat with flowers and candles in the middle

7. You exit the house and a cup is on the ground; what kind is it?one of my crystal glasses from the house

8. What do you do with the cup?carry it back inside to the sink

9. You walk to the edge of the property where you find yourself standing at a body of water, what is it?a clear stream flowing over rocks and sand

10. How do you cross that body of water?I walk across the rocks.

1. The person with whom you are walking in the woods is the most important to you.

2. The size of the animal is representative of your perception of the size of your problems in your life.

3. The severity of the interaction you have with the animal is representative of how you deal with your problems.

4. The size of your dream home is representative of the size of your ambition.

5. A lack of a fence is indicative of an open personality. People are welcome at all times. The presence of a fence indicates a closed personality. You'd prefer people not drop by unannounced.

6. If your answer did NOT include food, flowers, or people, then you are generally unhappy.

7. The durability of the material with the cup is representative of the perceived durability of your relationship.

8. What you did with the cup is representative of your attitude.

9. The size of the body of water is representative of the size of your relationships.

10. The way you cross the water is representative to how easy or hard you expect your life to be.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Finally. It's over. My freshman year of college has officially been completed. Although it's been challenging, I gotta say, I've absolutely loved it. So many things I've learned. Calculus is not fun. Physics still is. I picked the right major, thank the Lord. I don't want to change it like SO many students do. I know myself pretty well, but I'm always changing and growing. Commuting is not fun. But Dr. Little IS... despite how hard he tries to intimidate the world. I may hate "The Human Situation" but it still managed to become one of my favorite classes. Laughing during every single one of our gatherings probably has something to do with that. The library actually does help me study. School is a lot more fun when I study. Or at least do my homework. I don't enjoy taking tests over things I don't understand. College kids are pretty notorious for all-nighters. I don't like them. I like to sleep. A lot. All the time. It makes life (and school) better. I need support and encouragement even though I always try to take care of myself. Pictures = therapy. Experience is the best teacher there is. Procrastination really isn't as much fun as I used to believe it is. Life is hard, but it's worth it. Teachers usually know more things better than I do. Yet this is NOT an absolute truth. My education is my responsibility, and I don't need to rely on professors to spoonfeed it to me. They usually won't. It is extremely nice though when I find one of those teachers who really and truly cares. They're rare. They're amazing. Maybe they're amazing because they're rare. What difference does something make that EVERYONE has? No, no. It's those unique moments in life that really matter. I don't know if this blog really makes sense. I'm tired. It's been a long day. And it's been an even longer week. But this is what I've been thinking about since realizing I'm done. It suddenly hit me today when I was well over halfway to my house. I'd finished all of my finals, all homework, all essays, my application, and even moving out. And I was going home. I almost stopped driving when the shock, excitement, fear, anxiety, happiness, etc. all overwhelmed me. I'm finished. I'm done. I did it. It's over. I have successfully transitioned into a college kid. I can't express how much I love new beginnings. Now that this first year is past, I have new beginnings right ahead of me. And I am so excited! As a certain singer whom I shall not name would say, I'm at the starting line of the rest of my life, as ready as I've ever been. Life is flying along so fast. We know how that is. Sometimes it's crazy down and I just want to curl up and pretend I don't exist for a little while, but I love the ride I'm on right now. I have so many opportunities at hand. So much to look forward to. So much to look back on. And so much to just relish right now. I feel perfect today.I didn't get straight As this semester. I didn't get straight As last semester. I know I've improved though. I done so much hard work though - both in subjects I like and subjects I hate. It makes me fairly proud that I can find motivation in either case. This feeling is hopefully something I'll never forget. Working towards this particular achievement is something I can handle. Working until I feel like I've worked. The work isn't really that much fun, but the results are addictive to me. Maybe this will REALLY sink in... like enough to motivate me into better time management and less procrastination and/or apathy. We'll have to see on that one. :-)So anyway, this is almost pure exhaustion talking, but I just realllllly wanted to capture how I feel today. It's been such a gloriously happy day... since noon. The morning was pretty great, but it was a bit stressful. All the work I did this morning is what made this afternoon so amazing though, so it was worth it. I can hardly believe I'm finally done.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

High school = read occasionally + do homework right before it's due + not study

Recent college = read + COMPLETE homework in a timely manner + study

I actually enjoy the second one better, much to my surprise.

NOW, for next year. My schedule will allow plenty of time for studying... It's a rather awkward schedule, but that's how life tends to be with me. Maybe I like it that way...?

Maybe it's kind of light and difficult to see. There are also scratches, scribbles, and edits, but this is basically what my schedule will look like for the Fall 2009 Semester.

Why do I hate it?Class, yet again!, until 7p.m.And Tuesdays, seriously?!? Why is Mechanics ONLY offered once? Tuesday and Thursday nights?Engineering has this weird tendency AWAY from normal hours. Maybe vampires are in charge.But hey, at least I decided to switch physics so I don't have any Friday classes. Yet again. :-)I also managed to avoid any classes prior to 10a.m. Not too shabby.But if I hadn't moved physics, Mondays would rock my socks off. 10-2, no break, 2:30-4, then 5:30-7. Outstanding!Also, I have no honors course. In order to graduate with honors, you have to have one every single semester, which means I'll be petitioning for honors credit in one of these classes. Extra work! Yay. Actually I don't mind work so much anymore (see beginning). Time management and dedication are worth it after all.Basically, I don't hate it as much as I did when I told you I do. We'll see how I feel about it in four and a half months though.Oh, and I also have engineering math with my ... friends. Ya know. Yeah. I would've had physics with them too, but I figured it wasn't worth such a crappy schedule. Actually, I could change math to MWF11-12 where physics was in order to have a better professor. Then Mech Design lab could be 1-4Wed instead of 5:30-8:30, but whatever. I want class with my friends, and much more importantly - I don't want Friday classes. My wrist hurts from typing all of this. I'll talk to you laterrr!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Soooo, I have decided to try blogging. There are always things I want to say, but don't know who to say them to. So here I am. And here you are. Let's see how this goes.That's all for today.Cause I have stuff to do.- Read- Calculus- Physics- Read- Rewrite- Pictures!- Letter- Life