What I Did For Love
Part 1 to 3

June 17, 1999
My name is Mina Nam. I’m 19, still very young,
but I am dying. Not right now but my life is slowly
fading away as I’m writing my story. At this
moment I’m sitting at ‘our’ spot.
Mine and Eun Ji Won, the love of my life.

The sun is slowly beginning to set over
the lake. I took a glance at my reflection in the
water. My physical looks have changed drastically
within the past few months, but the water reflected
the true me. Inside I’m still the same person.
I have done and given so much for love but never once,
have I received it back from Ji Won. There are times
that I wanted to tell him everything that I’ve
done for him and make him love me back. But I can’t.
Love is not selfish.

So I did what felt right. I kept giving Ji Won
my love and I never asked for his love in return. Even though
I’ll leave this world pretty soon, my love for him will
still remain. My story begins when I first met Ji Won six years
ago on this one fateful day. It all started when…

October 31, 1993
"You better come back here! You good for nothing
brat!” I covered my ears with my palms. That
was my stepmother calling me. Her voice sounded murderous
and I didn’t want to face her today. She had
slapped and hit me too much already. I’m afraid
I can’t take it anymore so I hid in my closet.
I peeked through the crack in my closet and saw my
stepmom with a really pissed off look on her face.
She was holding that stick that I’m always afraid
of. I winced as I thought about how much it would
hurt if she hits me with it again.

I’m just thirteen and whoever said 13 was
an unlucky number were probably right. My mom had
died when I was just turning ten. Before she died,
she told me that I was the most beautiful girl in
the world and how proud she was to be my mother. She
said even though she’ll be gone, her love will
always remain with me. Tears rolled down my cheeks.
‘If you love me mommy, how can you be so selfish
to leave me?’ When I turned 13, my dad remarried
Mok Young A, who became my stepmom. She was a cold-hearted
woman who tortured me all day. Any self-esteem I had
for myself was shattered and I was living a nightmare.
My closet door suddenly opened.

“There you are! You wicked girl!” My stepmom started
cussing at me as she pulled me out of the closet and threw me
onto the floor. I began to tremble because I knew what was going
to happen next.
*Whack whack whack.*
I cried out in pain but I knew no one is going to hear my cries.
I desperately began to gasp for air. My heart was aching again.
I couldn’t breathe.
“Not again! Can’t you see how much you’re costing
your father and me with your heart problems? If it wasn’t
for all these medical bills we wouldn’t be so poor now!”
I had this heart condition where air would suddenly shut off and
I wouldn’t ne able to breathe. The doctors saved me by giving
me a respirator and pills, but they’re not sure how much
longer I’ll be able to live. My dad (who was a pathetic
excuse for a man) came in. He looked down at me with sorrowful
eyes.

He held my stepmom’s arm lightly and said, “I think
she had enough. You don’t want her to have another attack.
Calm down and let’s have dinner.”
“That’s why I’m hitting her!” she yelled.
“She got detention and stayed back after school for an hour.
She was supposed to be home to buy food to prepare for dinner.
Your daughter is so evil. She wants me to starve or something!”
“I didn’t get detention. The teacher wanted to talk
to me about...“ I was cut off by the whack of my stepmom’s
stick. I cried silently in pain and turned away. I didn’t
want to look at her.
My dad said, “Well, dinner’s just going to be a little
late today. Mina, say sorry to your mom.”
Despite the pain, I managed to say, “Sorry mom. Please forgive
me.”
My dad handed me some money.
“Here. Go buy food to make mee-yuk-gook for tonight.”
My stepmom’s temper simmered down a little as my dad lead
her out of my room.
I picked up the money and headed for the store. Mr. Choi, the
owner of Choi Food Market shook his head as I walked in. He knew
what kind of hell I was going through. I finished my shopping
and checked out.
“That’ll be $3.49.”
“What?” I asked.
“Umm... Mr. Choi. That’s impossible. With all this
stuff it should be around $15.”
“I know Mina.” Mr. Choi gave me a sad smile.
“The exact price is $14.32. Why don’t you keep the
change for yourself?” I opened my mouth in shock.
“Mr. Choi… I.. I can’t do that,” I said
as I handed him $20. He only took five.
“No. Keep it. I know that stepmom of yours don’t give
you any money.” I looked up at Mr. Choi with tears in my
eyes. Here he is, just a friend reaching out to me when I am suffering.
I said thanks and headed for home.

I decided to take a shortcut home but as I passed
the alley, a hand pulled me in. I was knocked to the
ground and a shadow hovered over me. I began to scream
but the same hand covered my mouth.
“Shut up or I’ll kill you!” I shut
my mouth instantly. I didn’t want to die yet.
In the moon’s reflection I got a good look of
my attacker. It was a boy who looked a little bit
older than me. His face and clothes were dirty but
he had really good features so I could tell he was
extremely good-looking. But this was not a time to
think about such things.
He held a table knife at my throat and said, “Give
me all your money or I’ll kill you.”
I panicked but I knew what to do. I used the move
I wanted to use on my stepmom every time she pinned
me down and hit me. I kicked him hard, right into
his family jewels. He gasped and fell to the floor,
dropping the knife. I picked up my groceries and ran.

I guess you can call me the dumbest person alive.
I was afraid I had kicked the boy too hard and permanently
injured him. Besides, since my life is hell already,
I didn’t want him to go through it too. So I
turned back.

When I came back to the alley, the boy was still lying on the
floor. He was moaning softly. I lifted him up gently.
“Are you okay?” I asked. He shook his head.
“I’m sorry,” I said to him. I reached into my
pocket and pulled out the money Mr. Choi gave me.
“If you need money, then here it is. All I have is ten dollars.”
I placed the money in his hand and walked away. He looked at me
with this weird expression that I couldn’t read. I picked
up my groceries and this time I left without turning back. I could
tell the boy was watching me as I was walking away…