moving with the wind

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I spent six months here camping on the land and working with it. Feeding animals, milking goats, and soaking in each day. This was about two years ago now, seeing this video brought all the loveliness flooding back to me. I’m so grateful for this time in my life. It was a pivotal, challenging and so needed. It opened me to the healing power of nature, if we just show up. Tis’ a beautiful place, with inspired folks, and I look forward to when the universe sets me back here. Enjoy.

Today is my first day off in a while.. that is truly all to myself. No obligations to work or care taking, and nothin’ but time. I got to thinking when I was paddling out for a morning surf today..that I could live like this forever. I don’t need much, just this simple sweetness. I have a place to live on my boat. A job I love at the dive shop. A guitar, and friends to play and sing with. I get to surf in between all the things I need to do. I cant think of a thing more I could want or need. Besides of course more of the people I love being a little closer. It seems that with less in…

We talk about losing yourself, then finding it again, or discovering pieces of it halfway through our lifetimes. Sometimes we just are trying to get to know our Self. To better it, corral it, and mold it. Maybe you need to sit on a mountain for 3 days and 3 nights if the Self is especially seeking. At a point in life many of us will get wrapped up in someone else’s Self. Then you might have to take a few steps back..go out and find your Self again.

So I’m here on this Island with My Self. I’m settled in, car, boat/home, bike..job..and I just paid for a year of registration for my car and I can’t be outlasted by me registration, so I must stay. Lately though I keep getting hit, or slammed really, with the question ‘So, uh what do you do?.’ And i scramble for a moment, and then have finally settled in with ‘I’m not really sure yet.’ Is that so bad? I’m just trying to find my Self! I want to yell, inappropriately and then make them feel bad for asking such a lofty question that implies I need a tagline for my Self. They want something simple back like, I farm. I work at a bank. I’m a nanny. Whatever it is. It is not that I don’t do anything, I do lots of things..they just haven’t found their way into a mold yet. I suppose my self isn’t ready to identify with one of the things I do. However I am as guilty as the next as having asked that question before. Now though I am shifting to a new question. “What sort of things do you like to do”? Boom. Moved a few words around and the question opens up a person to share beyond their occupation. The things we enjoy are little reflections of ourselves. We maybe can’t do what we love all of the time, but that doesn’t mean we love these things less. We are all mysteries to each other and maybe to our own selves sometimes. Our biggest mistake is to over simplify one another. To just wrap up getting to know someone in learning what they do.

Wherever you go, so with all your Self. Love and be open to all the Selfs.

Last night I went on a night dive in Davis Bay where the dive shop is at. Usually I do night dives at the pier, where you have an easy reference the entire time. Even though this site is becoming familiar in the daylight there is an eeriness that nightfall brings. Fish sleeping, and coral polyps out feeding..things are just off from your daytime normalities. I love dropping down under the water as the sun dips beyond the horizon, then resurfacing under the stars. We walked the beach back to the dive shop recollecting the things we saw, and clarifying what our failed hand signals had meant. Almost back, we slowed to a stop as we noticed the grass was moving with tiny little turtles. At first there were just a few..then the more we looked the more and more we found. They were heading in all directions, scrambling to the lights from the resort pool that they thought was the moon over the ocean. I ran and grabbed a bin to transport them to the beach. There were too many to count at this point I was crawling and collecting them from the bushes, as fire ants tore up my ankles, though I hardly realized how bad it until I saw the bites this morning. Each baby turtle I could pluck up and redirect to the beach was a little triumph. They were so precious, I wanted to put one in my pocket and take it with me everywhere, and talk to it about things we would see in our day together, I would take such good care of him. Though I would never really hijack a baby turtle to take home, I fell in love with each of these little guys and have been thinking about them all morning, wondering how many made it through the night, and how many will make it the week, or more..and if any of them will reach their possible 30 year life span. My guess is there were 60 or so that we transported back to the beach. Everyone that walked by joined in and we had a little turtle herder army by the time we were done. I may not be able to change the government, or stop the military…I can’t predict the weather, i can’t stop overfishing or program a computer..but I can make a difference for those little turtles. Of all the things happening in the world that I could touch, or be a part of last night, I’m blessed to be here. Saving baby turtles. Godspeed little ones. Godspeed.