Britney Spears is a sexual harasser

Seen here knocking back her hourly quota of Starbucks and Subway, Britney Spears allegedly sexually harassed one of her bodyguards who finally quit after getting tired of trying to make her wear underwear. The Sun reports:

“She was always giving him the come on and he felt if he didn’t reciprocate he could lose his job. He finally handed in his notice last week and is considering legal action.
“She runs round the house naked and yelling at staff. All her guards knew they could be removed if they looked at her the wrong way. Unfortunately for Fernando, she took a liking to him, so he was under more pressure than most. He wanted to be a good security guard and look after her but the situation became unbearable.”
The last straw came when Britney’s dad JAMIE – who is in legal control of her and can hire and fire staff – kicked off after she left her Los Angeles home without underwear.
“Jamie went mental when he saw the pictures and Fernando was made the fall guy. He was not fired but told he was to blame. He had had enough.”

So basically guarding Britney Spears is like babysitting a nympho toddler who keeps trying to bang you. I just assumed that was a given.

UPDATE: This just in…

Dear Internet Website The Superficial,

Your last paragraph was the most elegant combination of words to fall upon this director’s eyes. I do believe I have what you young people refer to as “a boner.”