The picture of my new pal Wendy over at a little c (because she refuses to give it a big C) looking absolutely beautiful in an artful and seriously gorgeous kind of way with her head bedazzled. But saying bedazzled doesn’t sound right, it sounds tacky and this, this is stunning. I was envious and it almost not quite but almost made me want to shave my head again. I would take bald if I looked as phenomenal as Wendy does. Wendy also did the grooviest thing with her port, prompting my self deprecating banter all week for not having thought of it when I had that gross thing buried in my chest for a year. She painted her port to look like a daisy. Go see it. I love daisies! I have daisy rings and daisy bracelets, daisies hand painted on the wall in my office with Amelia’s pinky making the yellow dot; if only I had known I could have a daisy port. I kinda have a girl crush on Wendy this week if you can’t tell. She is the coolest cat. I remember the day I had my head shaved and came home to get my first glimpse in private. As I pulled the hat off, I really really hoped that I looked like a Wendy, but I didn’t. She has indeed proven that lemonade without vodka is just boring (her post) I sooo wish I had her flavor of vodka when I had lemonade.

Me on a hot summer day, in front of my bathroom mirror. About five months into chemo. My eyebrows, eyelashes and hair all gone by then. Bloat from steroids and the pallor of serious sickness. Nauseated by the cognitive dissonance that came with looking in the mirror and not seeing a person who looked like me. It is frightening and dismantling. Unsettling. I remember weeping. Wondering where I had gone, wondering if I would ever get me back; questioning deep within, my hair will grow back, but will I? I wonder sometimes still, after five years, if I have….and suddenly, it’s hard to breathe…

This made me all weepy. Beauty is all around us–real beauty. I think it shines from within all of us. ❤ It is up to us to find it within ourselves, but when we do–it is SO BRIGHT and we cannot help but see it in others.

What's that Barney quote? “When I get sad, I stop being sad and start being awesome instead. True Story.” I think that IS a true story-especially when it comes to cancerchicks. 😉

Beautiful post – and very powerful, and yes it brought unexpected tears to my eyes too.
Thanks for introducing Wendy – I’ve been catching up with her story, and great to connect. And thank you so much for your lovely shout – though it’s probably less exotic than it sounds 🙂
Thanks so much and keep smiling, beautiful
P xx