For many of us, this has been a hard week, one full of
anxiety, sorrow, and loss. Researchers from the University of British Columbia
tell us that we can treat the mental pain that results from such hard times
with a simple, over-the-counter remedy: Tylenol. The painkiller, they tell us,
dampens both physical and mental pain, even the pain of existential dread.

When I read the study, I think I might have rolled my eyes.
Here’s why: We’re a nation of pain pacifiers. We’ve all become expert at
avoiding it—especially mental pain—at all costs. That’s why we have expressions
like “I need a stiff drink” and “where’s a bar of chocolate when I need one?”

And nearly everything we use to numb our pain comes with a
cost. Food: it widens our waistline. Alcohol: it gets us in car accidents,
causes us to say things we regret (this worsening the emotional pain) and can
harm health when imbibed in too frequently and in high doses.

And Tylenol is no exception. It can interact with other
meds. It’s also hard on the liver, especially when combined with alcohol.

That’s why my belief is as follows: some types of pain are
worth the wallow. We feel emotional pain for a reason. It’s a signal that is
designed to nudge us to do something—change our lives, forgive someone, help
someone, connect with others, ask for help, take better care of ourselves, and
so on. Here’s more: without pain, pleasure isn’t as pleasurable. We appreciate
a sunny day a lot more when it follows five cloudy ones. Similarly, we
appreciate joy a lot more when it follows sadness.

Numb emotional pain with food or drugs and we lose that
source of wisdom, motivation, and perspective. We become complacent. Rather
than steering the boat of life, the boat steers us.

So sit with it. Tell yourself, “This is uncomfortable. I
don’t like it, but it will pass.” Study it. What is this pain telling you? On a
scale of 1 to 10, where is that emotional pain? Is it as intense as losing a
loved one? Or as minor as finding out your favorite TV show will be a rerun you’ve
already seen? Where on that scale does pain lead to pleasure? And where does
pleasure lead to pain? Where is the pain located in your body? Can you find it?
You might find that just searching for it makes the pain disappear.

By doing this, you’ll be able to relax into the pain. You’ll
realize that you don’t need to fear it. Nor do you need to numb it. Like
clouds, it’s just something that comes and goes. And when it passes, what comes
next will seem so much better.

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ABOUT THE WRITERS

TIM DARRAGH has been reporting and editing the news for 30 years, most of it at The Morning Call. For much of that time, he's been doing award-winning investigative and in-depth reporting projects. Tim created the three-year-long Change of Heart project, and wrote a series on the state's fractured food inspection system that led to widespread improvements in food safety. Meantime, that novice jogger you see plodding along the streets around Bethlehem Township? That would be Tim.