FAQ

Our wonderful video game will be released for Windows, Mac, and Linux.

Will it be released for mobile phones like the Android or the iPhone?

Well, first of all, “Android” is not a mobile phone, it’s an operating system, but whatever.
Yes, we are thinking, in a not so far away future, maybe when Portugal is governed by intelligent people, of releasing a version for clever bricks and flat computers. Till then you’ll have to cheer yourself with the desktop versions for the personal computer.

What about gaming consoles?

For now you’ll have to console yourself with the versions that are available now! AH!
Now, seriously, we’re not planning on developing the game for gaming consoles. (Unless some crazy 3rd party producer from one of the big 3 wants an exclusive… “wink”, “wink”).

Do you use a game engine or is it all coded from scratch?

The best programmer in the world, perhaps in the whole galaxy, who knows, is working at Nerd Monkeys right now. We are trying to exploit him fully and making sure we suck everything he has to offer before he’s 35. Still, despite all our efforts, he decided to use Game Maker Studio. He says it’s the ideal game engine for this project, and I guess we just have to believe him.

Why isn’t the game free?

Because the people that make video games also need to eat and pay rent, among other regular things.

Do the characters have voices?

Yes. The voices of all the characters were recorded by famous actors. Then, through an expensive and costly process, we converted them into written words. This way it is possible to keep the style and 80s design without compromising the quality.

Will you release DLC in the future?

We’ll release DLC later. But we’ll never release anything in the future, that would be stupid. Next thing you know you’ll be asking us to release stuff in the past! Pfff.

Why such a low resolution?

“Why shucha wow wesowution?”

No, seriously. Shouldn’t everything have been made in HD or somehow more…defined?

“Nah, sherishly. Blah bla blaahh buh eitshdee bla blahh…blaaaaah?”

If I buy the game on your website, will you give me a Steam key?

Yes . We will give all buyers of Murder in Hotel Lisbon a Steam key IF it makes it to Valve’s digital store. We cannot, however, guarantee that it will ever be approved on Greenlight. That is a job for all our fans. What are you waiting for? Go and vote for us on Greenlight!

Will you support more languages?

Murder in the Hotel Lisbon is a complex game to translate and localize because every text is based on specific jokes, wordplay, names of places and characters. We are, however, working to ensure that, if all goes well, we will try to increase the range of available languages from countries like Poland, France, Spain or Italy. Translating to German will be extremely dificult because, as everybody knows, Germans have no sense of humor.

How long does it take to complete the game?

We have no clue! Right now the game is made of 1 main quest which is the murder in the Hotel Lisbon and 3 other sidequests. We are currently starting to test it, so eventually a pattern of longevity will emerge between all the testing sessions. Until then we can safely confirm that, to complete the game, it takes more than 5 minutes and less than 1000 hours.

Negative FAQ

What is a Negative F.A.Q.?

The opposite of a positive F.A.Q., obviously!

Why Negative F.A.Q.?

We can’t answer most of the cool questions the journalists ask about the game yet because it’s not convenient for us. So it’s easier to say what the game is not about. Isn’t it neat?

In that case, what are you making?

We are not making a book, nor a movie, nor a music album. We are also not at the office all day playing video games.

Is it an RPG, an RTS, or something with 3 letters?

It’s not an RPG (Role Playing Game) or an RTS (Real Time Strategy), or even an FPS (First Person Shooter).

What platforms are you developing the game for?

It will not be developed for the Sega Genesis or the Super NES. On the other hand, it doesn’t work on just one platform.

What languages does the game support?

It does not support Mandarin, Indian or Korean. But it might one day support Polish. And no, this is not a joke about polishing the game or getting the game polished.

When will the game be released?

It won’t be released in 2012 or 2011 because…it’s impossible. Unless you have a time machine, but then we would launch the game before we begin to make it, therefore eliminating the need to make it in the first place which means we couldn’t travel in time to launch it— AARGGHHH!