I felt a stir inside when we learned you were coming, an anxiousness that I struggled to name. I was quick to notice the hormonal and emotional changes I was going through, but even my mind’s eye can see there was more going on. Darkness. Back then we lived in our Dark House, not only did this home have only 4 windows in the entire house, I could tell in my spirit, from the day we first walked through it, that this house was dark spiritually… but how do you tell your new husband, and new in laws, that this beautiful house they want you to buy is evil? It…

You May Also Like

This week has been a firm reminder that at any given moment, there are many mountains out there waiting for me… not just the one I am on. Some would call this a “buzz kill” of sorts, but i disagree. As I sit here, massaging my leg that spontaneously fell asleep, while my low blood pressure limits simple activities (like standing for conversations), I have plans to visit the East Coast to see museums and historical monuments. I have plans to hike the Redwood Forest and Grand Canyon, places I haven’t been since I was a kid. Those are mountains I can only get to if I am fully dedicated…

You May Also Like

I have tried to write this update for weeks now. Holy crap, guys. Where do I begin? It’s been a tsunami, avalanche, hurricane of life since my last update… and God has been good. So good. Since my last update we have gone from unemployed, to my husband working 60+hrs a week. We have gone through a rollercoaster of diagnostics with my husband’s hearing, from tumor, to hospital admission, to neurological hearing loss, to “Hey, guys, we were way wrong. It’s only a FUNGUS growing in his ear.” Then there is the heart monitor I wore for over two weeks (would have been 4, except there is an issue with…

You May Also Like

Coming soon I will be including a few guest bloggers in the mix! ———————- If you are potentially interested in guest blogging, here’s what I’m looking for! 1. Lovely Resilience blog is looking for voices of hope. People who stand toe to toe with life and make the often hard choice to choose hope. 2. Your message is all your own, but I will make these requests. I do not use this blog site as a political platform, nor do I use it for a religious platform. I am using this website as a means of getting my foot in the door to empower others to choose hope. •What I…

“What if your biggest contribution to the world is someone you’re raising?” I heard them say this and almost immediately felt reservation. This was an incredibly romantic idea: this idea makes all of the sacrifices and ‘changes of plans’ worth it. But it just didn’t sit right with me… and I have to say something. First, let me say what I like about this quote (which is slightly paraphrased to be more inclusive) is that it makes us think outside of ourselves. I’m not just a Mombie, and someday after lots of blood sweat and tears I’ll die. My effort, day in and day out, is producing three really incredible…

Thanks to science, we know that the brain does not finish developing until around 25 years old. With this we know that most of our core beliefs are formulated before 25, with few major changes thereafter without something drastic influencing those beliefs. What we don’t talk about very often is how those core beliefs are driven by feelings that we believe at our core. Many of you are familiar with the movie Inside Out. This movie is such a powerful display of how this unfolds, passively demonstrating how Riley’s main driver was joy, but her parents’ drivers were sadness and anger. In real life it isn’t that simple, we know…

You May Also Like

There is something beautiful that happens when small children begin to reach milestones. Sometimes they labor for days or weeks before they first use a baby sign, or begin taking those first steps… in our wisdom we can see the ‘before’, the ‘during’ and (now) the ‘after’. It doesn’t change how hard the next inevitable milestone will be, but wisdom prepares us for what the process entails. Brene Brown talks about this process in theater terms: act I, act II and act III. To keep it brief, Act I is when the protagonist (you) finds their self on a journey of some kind. Act II is where the protagonist struggles,…

It was somewhere between bouncing a screaming baby and medicating my bleeding, cracked nipples that I knew I didn’t see the silver lining anymore. This wasn’t sustainable, I was pale, sleep deprived, so hungry I wasn’t hungry anymore, and this wasn’t the romantic fourth trimester I envisioned. I knew it was hard, but surely what I was feeling inside was not universal. The anxiety and nausea that overcame me every time I nursed our daughter, the sleep safety rules made me feel like our little bundle of joy was more of a suicidal time-bomb, I felt absolutely paranoid. Didn’t she know that I couldn’t sleep with her on my chest?…