Sign Language

A few days ago, the county Board of Supervisors voted down a proposal to post inspection grades in restaurant windows: A for edible, F for it'll pretty much kill you. Third District Supervisor Todd "In This Restaurant, Please Don't" Spitzer said letter grades are "misleading" and fail to accurately convey the fulsome conditions at some county eateries. According to the Reg (whose reporters brown bag it), one activist said Spitzer was wrong—that the letter system (A for order anything, F for stay away from anything that doesn't come in a plastic wrapper) is really quite helpful in the counties that adopt it, like Los Angeles, where eating out is considered an extreme sport for men and women on the Third World Dining Circuit.

We're here to help. At no cost to the taxpayer, the Weekly's DataLab design team devised the following easy-to-understand signs for posting outside troubled restaurants: