Friday, October 14, 2016

The Upstander Election

The Upstander Election

Enough is
Enough. In fact, it is way more than enough.

Nothing
could illustrate the need for a radical change in our thinking and our culture
than these last two weeks in Election 2016. What we have seen is Rape Culture
on display. Or worse. We’ve seen it glorified, exalted, and what is worse –
excused.

Women, who
are overwhelmingly the victims in sexual abuse, and all the men who are not
abusers, have worked for decades to make a difference in how we look at these
crimes and worked to end victim blaming. It has been an uphill fight all the
way. And we can see why, given the rhetoric from this election cycle.

On
Thursday, October 13, the women of America heard from a champion who
articulated perfectly just what we think and feel when we hear the language
that has been used. First Lady Michelle Obama gave voice to all of us in her speech in New Hampshire. I urge
you to read her words and watch the video. Her passion and her agonizingly
terrible conviction is inspiring.

“The fact is that in this election, we have a candidate for
President of the United
States who, over the course of his lifetime
and the course of this campaign, has said things about women that are so shocking,
so demeaning that I simply will not repeat anything here today. And last week,
we saw this candidate actually bragging about sexually assaulting women. And I
can't believe that I'm saying that a candidate for President of the United States
has bragged about sexually assaulting women.

“And I have to tell you that I can't stop thinking about
this. It has shaken me to my core in a way that I couldn't have predicted. So
while I'd love nothing more than to pretend like this isn't happening, and to
come out here and do my normal campaign speech, it would be dishonest and
disingenuous to me to just move on to the next thing like this was all just a
bad dream.

“This is not something that we can ignore. It's not
something we can just sweep under the rug as just another disturbing footnote
in a sad election season. Because this was not just a "lewd
conversation." This wasn't just locker-room banter. This was a powerful
individual speaking freely and openly about sexually predatory behavior, and
actually bragging about kissing and groping women, using language so obscene
that many of us were worried about our children hearing it when we turn on the
TV.”

And
strangely enough, there was another voice raised that day also made the point
that “Enough is Enough.” It was made with hideous sarcasm and great distain,
but the point was made.

Rush
Limbaugh said:

“You know what the magic word, the only thing that matters
in American sexual mores today is?” Limbaugh asked no on in particular on his
talk radio show Wednesday. “One thing. “You can do anything, the left will
promote and understand and tolerate anything, as long as there is one element,”
he continued. “Do you know what it is? Consent.”

BINGO,
Rush! You get it. And really, who expected that? Granted, that was not the
point he was trying to make, but that doesn’t change the fact that he stated a
truth we have been working toward for years: Consent is the key!

Mrs. Obama
made the point that we have the tool we need to send an unmistakable message
that Enough is Enough and that
sexual assault is not okay, regardless of the power and celebrity of the
perpetrator. As the immediate response to the tapes show:

According to the U.S.
Census Bureau, there were 161 million females in the U.S. in 2013
versus 156.1 million males, or about a ratio of 1-to-1. That ratio shifts
dramatically when looking at older populations, however: at age 85 and older,
women outnumber men by a ratio of 2-to-1 (4.0 million to 2.0 million).

Nationally, females make up 50.8 percent of the population,
but that percentage varies across states.

There are only nine states where males make up more than 50
percent of the population: Alaska, Colorado, Hawaii, Idaho, Montana, Nevada, North Dakota, Utah and Wyoming.

Consider
also the immediate social media response “After FiveThirtyEight published maps showing the electoral college
results if only men came out to vote, and if only women came out to vote, a new
hashtag started to trend on Twitter: #repealthe19th.
That's the 19th Amendment, the amendment that granted women the right to vote.
Trump supporters — the majority of whom are men —figured that might be as
good an option as any to ensure victory for their candidate.

These maps
are, by the way, imaginary. The response was anything but: #repealthe19th.

Lucky for
us, social media is a double edged sword, of course, so there was a response to
that hashtag. #Rejoicethe19th
celebrates that women fought hard for the right to vote via the 19th amendment
and Civil Rights Act.

What will
the last few day of the campaign bring? The trends are pretty clear:

In every election since 1984, women have comprised more of
the electorate than men. While women overall have backed the Democrat since
1988, white women have been an increasingly important part of Republican
presidential strength in recent years.

This year, the white vote is much more split than it has
been in the past, with white women — particularly college-educated white
women — moving toward Hillary Clinton even more dramatically than white
men without degrees have moved to Trump.

My 8-year
old granddaughter in 3rd grade has been learning about Upstander
behavior.

An upstander is
someone who says “no” to bullying. In virtually all bully-victim situations, there are
witnesses who view or know about the act. We want to make sure our kids are
part of a community where everyone—kids and grownups alike—makes the decision
to be an upstander, rather than a passive bystander who does nothing.