Pages

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Phone Call from The Census

The US Census office in New York has had to fire workers due to fraud. The new folks there must still be learning the ropes. This actual telephone call to my friend Erik Gordon was transcribed immediately upon hanging up, so it's practically verbatim...

Ring. Ring.

ERIK: "Hello?"

CHARLOTTE: "Hello. This is Charlotte calling from the 2010 United States Census. We've left you a couple of messages over the past few weeks but you haven't returned our calls. I'm calling to ask you some additional questions about the census form that you recently completed. This should take only a few minutes."

ERIK: "Okay."

CHARLOTTE: "Can I start by verifying your address?"

ERIK: "Yes, it's the one you have on the form -- 68 East 78th Street in New York."

CHARLOTTE: "And is this the Gordon household?"

ERIK: "Yes."

CHARLOTTE: "And who completed the census form on behalf of the household?"

ERIK: "I did. I'm the only one who lives here."

CHARLOTTE: "And what is your name?"

ERIK: "Erik Gordon. Don't you have that on the form I filled out?"

CHARLOTTE: "Yes."

ERIK: "So why are you asking me again?"

CHARLOTTE (reading): "We need to make sure that the 2010 US Census is an accurate count of every person in the United States and that no person is double counted. This should take only a few minutes."

ERIK: "Okay."

CHARLOTTE: "So Erik Gordon filled out the census form on behalf of your household?"

ERIK: "Yes, I did."

CHARLOTTE: "And am I speaking to Erik Gordon?"

ERIK: "Um, yes. But I think we've covered this, no?"

CHARLOTTE: "Yes, but I need to ask the questions in the order they appear on my screen."

ERIK: "Okay."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, how many people were living at your address on April 1, 2010?"

ERIK: "Just me. I'm the only one who lives here."

CHARLOTTE: "So should I put 'One?'"

ERIK: "Probably."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, do you have children, babies or foster children living with you?"

ERIK (louder): "I'm the only one here."

CHARLOTTE: "It's a yes or no question, Mr. Gordon."

ERIK: "If I'm the only one here, then the answer is 'No,' right?"

CHARLOTTE: "Okay, I'm going to put 'No.'"

ERIK: "Good idea."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, do you have any other relatives living with you?"

ERIK: "I'm the only one here."

CHARLOTTE: "I can't put that."

ERIK: "I don't care."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, we need to make sure that the 2010 US Census is an accurate count of every person in the United States and that no person is double counted. This should take only a few minutes."

ERIK: "But all of this is on the form I filled out."

CHARLOTTE: "I know. I have it here."

ERIK: "So why are you asking me the same questions?"

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, this should take only a few minutes."

ERIK: "This should take no minutes."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, are you refusing to answer the questions? Because if you're refusing to answer the questions, I'm going to have to call you back."

ERIK: "I'm not refusing to answer the questions, Charlotte. I already answered them."

CHARLOTTE: "When?"

ERIK: "On the form you have in front of you."

CHARLOTTE: "Oh."

ERIK: "Yes."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, this should only take a few minutes. Can I ask if you have any nonrelatives, such as roommates or babysitters living with you?"

ERIK: "I'm the only one here."

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, you know I can't put that."

ERIK: "No, Charlotte, no. I don't have anyone else living here!"

CHARLOTTE: "No roomates or babysitters?"

ERIK: "No!"

CHARLOTTE: "I'm going to put 'No.' Mr. Gordon, do you have anyone living with you temporarily?"

ERIK: "Charlotte, you know what I'm going to say, right?"

CHARLOTTE: "Mr. Gordon, it's a yes or no question."

ERIK: "Charlotte, you've already asked me about relatives and nonrelatives. Who else could be living with me?"

CHARLOTTE: "Anyone living with you temporarily, such as any illegal aliens."

ERIK: "Yes, Charlotte. I forgot. I do have illegal aliens living with me."

CHARLOTTE: "How many?"

ERIK: "I live with approximately twelve thousand illegal Mexican immigrants. But please don't put that down, I don't want to get in trouble."

37 comments:

I had the pleasure of receiving that exact same phone call. My blood pressure got so high, I thought I would have a stroke. My census caller was just as brain dead, and repeatedly asked me the same questions even though the answer was on the form I mailed back in and was not ambiguous at all. What a waste of my time!

Mostly I feel bad for the people having to make these calls. I'm sure they are instructed to ask *exactly* what's on screen and told they are only allowed to record responses that correspond *exactly* to one of the provided options. No wonder people got fired for falsifying information - who would want to do that?

my very first job when i was in high school was to call people and perform this sort of survey. I made minimum wage and was completely miserable. They are strictly watched and instructed on this survey. Often supervisors are listening in and they get in trouble if they don't read it word for word. I know it's annoying but these poor kids are just doing their jobs.

It's good to know we're helping keep useful people like this alive by paying them to do this useless census. It's called statistics, people. Let a small group of smart people do the census based on computations and stats and they will probably get it closer to the truth than this bloated mess that is the census.

Fill out a simple form they say ,thats it they say, its the law they say. Filled out said form had 3 people come by pounding on my door all looking for my neighbors 1 waking up my 6 month old baby. Still easy ? Part 2 endless phone calls demanding that I take a survey, first one was after 8PM , yup you guessed it waking up the baby . Am so tired of the cenus people , it seams never ending. Am ready to turn off my phone till they are done , hmmm wonder if I can block there number?

This is actually called the Coverage Follow Up survey. It runs through Mid-August of this year. I just finished my contract with them in a call center out of Kentucky. For the most part it is fairly simple and we were instructed to read everything VERBATIM on the screen. I understand it seems really redundant and for the most part it is. However, I cannot begin to tell you how many Americans could not even fill out their Census form right. Without our phone calls then, millions of households would not be counted correctly. Americans want to complain about their tax money going towards a survey that has given THOUSANDS of Americans jobs, but they have NO problem buying homes they cannot afford in the first place and no MY generation is going to have to figure out how to pay all this off, and SOMEHOW hold a future. Shame on you all who give a Census worker a hard time when all it takes is a little time. Yes it may be annoying and I know the questions are repetitive, but at least they gave Americans jobs and didn't go towards buying another bank out. It just shows me how spoiled America really is.

after reading this, i have mixed feelings, i was one of those "useless people" doing a "useless job" and using the government tax money, which seems to you to be worse than a bailout. but i can tell you that i am a college graduate who was laid off last year and could not find any other job. do i feel it was unnecessary to make so many calls with forms that were correct from the start? yes. do i hate the fact that i had to read everything from the screen VERBATIM for fear of losing my job? absolutely. did i get 'in trouble' for talking gently to a 98 year old man who was in WW2? but am i happy i didn't have to move into my vehicle over the summer? absolutely.

so everyone who responded to this, yes it is annoying. but it's every DECADE, and it's for the betterment of your community. so get over it.

I smell something fishy going on...I can feel it in the back of my neck...I had a similar experience. I filled the census form, with all detailing, and making sure I wrote the names, and information carefully...I put it in the mail...a few weeks later a man was in the front door...demanding that I fill in the form...I said, "I already filled this form, it took me about three days to fill it in, to make sure I answer every question correct and clearly. I sent it in the U.S. mail. You MUST have receive it!" The man admited that they had receive it, and that they just neede it to him fill it again to verify the answers. I spend about 45 minutes with the man standing on the door, and CHOCKINGLY, he was scribiling my answers, he was not being careful about how he was spelling our names. OMG! I about killed him. After reading this...I feel something..that I can not put my finger on...it is definetly GOING ON!

In 2000 I wrote down just an answer to the first question, and sent it in. I got a phone call a few weeks later which I kept to under a minute, explaining further questions weren't authorized by the Constitution.

In 2010 I wrote my answer to the first question, and then wrote, "Resident asserts constitutional grounds against further interrogation. Please do not call or visit." I sent it in like that. I have heard nothing back.

David, this was a very entertaining post..If fairness, this Charlotte is very persistent in getting those infos.. its good to know that you still "hold" your composure despite being pissed by her reading the survey questions again and again..sad to say that's their job and we have to be cooperative to avoid fraud information.

People want to be civic-minded, but our government really makes it hard when they ask intrusive questions seeking sensitive information.

Take your privacy seriously people!

It really is true that the US Census Bureau provided data right down to the level of name, address and listed racial ancestry to the Secret Service, which passed it on to military and Commerce Dept. officials to use in finding and interning Japanese-Americans during WW2.

The Census Bureau denied having done this (claiming they only gave the US Army block-level information with no personal information) until they were outed in 2007 by researchers ( http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=confirmed-the-us-census-b&sc=I100322 )

Of course, the worst thing about the attitude of the CB is that they thought they were actually covering their butts by saying they'd only given out block-level information! These paper pushers really don't "get" privacy and protection from government abuse, my friends!

That was then, though, and this is now. Our more politically correct governments would never use census data against us today, would they?

Think again. The Census Bureau has cheerfully given data to various cities and counties who have subsequently used it crack down on supposed violations of zoning laws. It has especially been used to try to scale back development of apartments in houses that cities would like to keep as "single family homes," whether they are legally empowered to do so or not. And do you suspect that some municipalities are using census data to target ethnic neighborhoods for illegal immigrant sweeps? Yup. Hmmm . . . Oh well, that's the Hispanic part of town, they'd never target our lily-white WASP part of town, or our funky black neighborhood, would they? . . . Would they?

The IRS has been trying for years to figure out how to use cross-matching of census data to put people on their audit radar . . .

The Wall Street Journal put it aptly way back in 1989 when they said "Honesty may not be your best census policy" ( http://www.lizmichael.com/bovard.htm )

Do You Have Time For This?

Cool New Stuff

Fine Print

The thoughts and opinions expressed herein belong to the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Bessemer Venture Partners or any of its affiliates (“Bessemer”). The material here is written on the author’s own time for his own reasons, and Bessemer has not reviewed or approved the information herein. Any discussion of topics related to Bessemer or its investment activities should not be construed as an official comment of Bessemer.