‘Imperator Rome’ Review: Julius Caesar or Biggus Dickus?

After the success of Europa Universalis 4 and Crusader Kings 2, there was much appetite for a Classical era version of the two games. Imperator Rome was soon announced, showcasing a merging of ideas from both of those previous games, conceiving dreams of Hellenic empires and Brythonic rebellions. However, much of that excitement has since subsided, with the gameplay mostly not reaching the high expectations that are expected of Paradox. Such is the disappointment that high hopes bring.

On the surface, Imperator Rome definitely looks stunning. The map has a lot of detail, with the provinces being particularly well researched. When it comes to producing authentic maps, Paradox’s commitment is unquestionable. Europa Universalis 4‘s dynamic province names might have been nice, whereby province names change depending on which nation currently owns them — but that’s a small detail that doesn’t matter at this stage, particularly as many of these ancient tribes wouldn’t have recognized such boundaries. It’s just odd to see the province of Londinium before the Romans occupy ancient London.

However, after a moment of great first impressions, the gameplay falls quicker than Pompeii. For one, the user interface is easily the worst of any Paradox game in living memory; it’s genuinely difficult to find the information the player needs to make decisions, which is something crucial for intricate strategy games. Information on truces, alliances, trade deals, etc. are all lost beneath the clutter of other less crucial statistics. For instance, if anybody reading this review knows where to find a province’s chance of rebellion, please leave a comment below.

On the surface, it looks like Julius Ceasar but beneath the armor, it’s Biggus Dickus wielding a toy sword.

Individual provinces seem to be less important, with the region being much more of the focus — clicking on an individual province yields more information in regards to the whole collective region than on that particular area — and trade becomes a vital component of that region’s success, an aspect that actually has a lot of potential. Resources have different effects on the population, similar to how they work in the Civilization series. For instance, fish will help the population grow faster, while camels are needed to produce camel cavalry. It’s one of the few additions that would help strengthen the trade function in Europa Universalis 4.

Likewise, the various unit types are something that could benefit the Europa Universalis series in the future (at least for the fifth installment). The problem is that once again there is a lack of information. The immediate cost for each unit is there, but no details on upkeep. And while the information for the strengths and weaknesses of each unit type are there, it isn’t particularly clear, and it’s difficult to know what the correct balance is. There doesn’t appear to be a unit limit, so the player (and AI) can build large armies without consequence; this means that the player could keep going to war indefinitely to finance a large army (which worked playing Iceni).

Imperator Rome has a clear focus on conquest, which isn’t entirely bad, but does feel empty; it’s difficult to immerse into the different tribes and nations when they lack individuality. For instance, the tribes in ancient Britain have units that look like Romans, but Romans they are not. Watching the Queen of Iceni lead an army of centurions is disheartened laziness. The rebellions that happen are even worse; while playing as Iceni, Cantiaci rebels arose and immediately had their original territory. Not too bad, as it’s easy enough to push back their army and siege down their provinces. However, once a fort is conquered, it moves to an adjacent province, which then reclaims the province that was previously conquered. That these forts can randomly move to an adjacent province is beyond ridiculous, and that they unsiege what the player had just sieged makes the whole process a chore.

That said, while much more hollow than in Crusader Kings 2, the character role-playing aspect can be reasonably enjoyable. Disloyal clan leaders will revolt against the player, so befriending and bribing them are great ways to keep certain individuals close. It isn’t a crucial part of the gameplay, and much of the problems associated with characters are easily resolved, but it’s an enjoyable touch, leaving a little more to do in between conquests.

Similarly to monarch points in Europa Universalis 4, there are power points in Imperator Rome that can be spent to claim inventions, raise stability, fabricate claims, or do anything else that’s worth doing. Military power points allow the player to adopt certain military traditions, while civic power is spent on introducing new inventions, oratory power is used for various diplomatic missions, and religious power can be spent to increase stability or convert religion in provinces. The four powers are a great concept, and they work reasonably well. Oratory power seems to be the most useful, while thus far the religious power has been the least. They could use a little more balancing, but they’re not a major concern.

In two years time, Imperator Rome will be an amazing game behind a giant paywall.

But this is perhaps the bigger picture. Add up all the problems, and Imperator Rome is simply incomplete. To put it bluntly, the game is boring — there’s not enough to do. Imperator Rome has no clothes; on the surface, it looks like Julius Ceasar, but beneath the armor it’s merely Biggus Dickus wielding a toy sword. The game plays as if it’s still in alpha, a little rushed to make a quick buck off of all the Europa Universalis and Crusader King fans.

The even bigger picture here is that all Paradox fans have been here before. In two years time, Imperator Rome will be an amazing game behind a giant paywall. Five DLCs later, all with vital content to make the game playable, and the fans will have the Imperator Rome they first imagined. These DLCs won’t be cheap, and by the end of it, they will have spent close to $200 to get the game they should have had to begin with. The same old tricks we fall for time and time again.

The only recommendation is to wait two years and buy Imperator Rome in its final form, particularly when it inevitably ends up in a Steam sale. There isn’t enough content, enough gameplay, nor enough fun to be had in its current state. Imperator Rome has bags of potential, but once again, we’re waiting for those crucial DLCs to bring the game to life.

Lost his ticket on the 'Number 9' Luxury Express Train to the Ninth Underworld. Has been left to write articles and reviews about games to write off his debt until the 'powers that be' feel it is sufficiently paid.

‘Creature In The Well’ Review: Dungeon Crawling Pinballing

A top-down, pinball-inspired, hack-and-slash dungeon crawler? That certainly may be a genre combination never done before. But in reflection to the sciences of chemistry, sometimes grouping elements into a mixture can create something that is definitively unique and distinguishable from its initial ingredients. Creature In The Well is a whole new breed of game design — by blending various genres, developer Flight School has created one of the most distinctive and satisfying puzzle games in recent years. The closest comparison you can probably make is if Hyper Light Drifter collided with a classic pinball cabinet and Breakout.

Acquiring a New Beat

Creature in the Well tasks the final remaining BOT-C unit in a mysterious world to venture into the desert mountain that lies in wait next to the imprisoned city of Mirage, a land captured by a deadly sandstorm. Inside the mountain rests an ancient facility in need of power; but there’s also a fearsome creature who stuck in a state of despair. It is the bot’s job to reboot the machine, stop the monster, and save the city of Mirage from the never-ending storm that shrouds the land.

Although it may sound like a hack-and-slash dungeon crawler, Creature In The Well is not a test of strength against all odds; it’s a quest of knowledge that utilizes timed actions. The BOT-C unit is not on a bloodlust to its goal; it’s in a fight for survival through various puzzles that demonstrate adaptability. The game is a test against the active mind.

After obtaining a sword and learning quicker means of movement through dashing, it would be easy to assume that fighting comes next. However, the reality of the situation is that the BOT-C unit’s sword and secondary weapon are never swung directly at an opponent — not once throughout the entire journey. Instead, weapons are used as flippers in a sort of active pinball game, continuously knocking around orbs of energy at various machines that will grant voltage. This energy must be spent to open hydraulic doors throughout each dungeon that block progress, but it can also be used to upgrade the BOT-C unit’s gear via a blacksmith, or to find upgrades secretly scattered behind different pathways. The more thoroughly a dungeon is explored, the more voltage there is to claim from conquering puzzles of higher difficulty.

The environment then ends up becoming the greatest threat, as there are no true enemies to wield weapons against. A variety of projectiles can cause damage, forcing players to move around. Well-placed shots and timely swings are the keys to progression, and the only way of reaching the endgame. Adapting and using creative ways to solve puzzles is the foundation of Creature In The Well. Mastering Breakout and Pong-like movements for multiple projectiles at the same time is the recipe for success.

Creature In The Well makes magnificent use of the Unreal Engine, showcasing a nightly overcast atmosphere with a bleak, dark color palette, but it also manages to remain bright and colorful thanks to the illuminating projectile lights and flashy animations. This ultimately amounts to a game that is not only satisfying to play, but satisfying to watch. It’s a distinct art style that is welcoming to the eyes rather than a confusingly chaotic bunch of unrecognizable firefights.

Repetition Recognition

Creature in the Well urges players to progressively think smarter as they traverse the eight vastly different dungeons. Each puzzle room slowly improves upon the last, as the game consistently and smartly reuses mechanics while introducing new gimmicks to accommodate the metronome-action movements. These gimmicks can range from the way in which energy orbs damage to adding new obstacles like electrical flooring or spiraling death traps.

Puzzles can progressively become more and more challenging, but most are either not mandatory or don’t need to be completed immediately, as there are branching paths and enough energy to skip some roadblocks. This ultimately comes off as a negative or positive aspect depending on the individual player, as puzzle difficulty drastically changes depending on the order in which dungeons are played. Creature In The Well’s lack of a recommended dungeon order might make you work harder in the early-game, which results in a rather carefree late-game that sees you blasting through puzzles with ease — or vice versa.

On the other hand, this gives the player breathing room, allowing them to experiment with routes and return to previous challenges. Skipping or leaving puzzles unsolved lessens opportunities for rewards, so a handy in-game map system allows players to keep track of exactly where they have not completed rooms on designated paths. An unyielding challenge can become an underwhelming enigma with proper dedication and practice. That said, although the endgame can become less challenging than the beginning, the pinball-inspired mechanics are so entertaining that a decline in difficulty never truly becomes an issue. Creature in the Well is never a slog to play through, even when revisiting old dungeons in the latter half of the game.

All of these dungeons conclude with thrilling matchups with the main power sources, as well as the creature who lives beneath the land. Creature In The Well does not have what many would consider traditional dungeon crawler boss fights, but simply sticks to a its puzzle gameplay and challenges players with a larger and more complex version. These battles involve the creature, who extends its arms from beneath the dark abyss in an attempt to attack you.

Embrace The Storm

Creature In The Well is a captivating case of a fresh experiment gone right. Flight School took risks in attempting to dabble in multiple genres at once that seemingly don’t correlate to each other. Yet, the end result is a fascinating concept built on the gorgeously-used Unreal Engine, with the potential to be further expanded upon. Albeit short, the journey to delve into the deepest parts of the mountain to solve new high-speed kinetic puzzles while avoiding a mysterious, calamitous creature never grows stale over the 5-7 hour journey. It is by far the most distinct ‘break the mold’ type game to be released this year, and an absolute must-try for audiences of both the pinball and puzzle game genres.

‘Daemon X Machina’ Review: Beautifully Bombastic Mech Action

There’s something beautiful about Daemon X Machina. More than just its striking visual style, however, the game’s mere existence is special in its own right. It’s been some time since a classic mech-based action game in the vein of mainstays like Armored Core has burst onto the market, and given that much of the original staff of that monumental series have moved on to Daemon X Machina, this has long seemed like a noteworthy release for fans of robotic action.

However, it’s no secret that Daemon X Machina has had a bumpy road to release. Between its sub-par initial demo and its severe lack of pre-release hype, it hasn’t been easy for Marvelous’ Switch exclusive to get the spotlight. Thankfully, the result largely overcomes these roadblocks to create a refreshingly polished and much-needed revival of the genre. Daemon X Machina certainly has its share of issues with story and mission structure, but overall it’s a refined action game that should please both new players and genre veterans alike.

For the most part, Daemon X Machina checks off every box for ideal mech action It wastes no time in putting the player in control of a massive, customizable, explosive robot suit called an “Arsenal,” which allows players to zip recklessly around the post-apocalyptic environments to wreak destruction with wild abandon. There’s a delightful simplicity to this; with its easy-to-grasp controls, there’s no excessive complexity, allowing for the visceral joy of blasting enemies out of the sky with extravagant missile launchers to shine through.

But that is not to say that Daemon X Machina is merely a mindless romp. Instead, the plentiful variety of different mission types ensures that you’ll have to think on your feet with every objective. Some missions will have you simply gunning down every foe you see, while others task you with protecting specific units, and still more pit you against massive bosses — which are easily the game’s most memorable missions. With so many different objectives, each mission becomes an enticing prospect.

Unfortunately, this variety gets a bit strained towards the end of the fifteen-hour campaign. Far too often, late game missions merely stick you in an arena with a few other full mech fighters then make you fight to the death — and considering that these are easily the most tedious fights in the game due to how chaotic and difficult it is to attack fast-moving robotic suits, this gets frustrating fast. Likewise, the enemy variety leaves something to be desired, with the vast majority of foes consisting of mere drones or tanks, with the occasional mech thrown in for interest.

Daemon X Machina easily stands out for its polish, style, and accessibility.

However, these negative factors only partially distract from what makes Daemon X Machina so special: its ludicrous action. There’s also plenty of customization available to wreak havoc, allowing you to tweak your Arsenal to your liking. Want to focus on hand-to-hand combat? Install some new legs optimized for speedy ground maneuvering, and some arms for katana-wielding. Taking to the skies? Lighten your load, increase your memory capacity, and pack on the guns. The game presents the options to fight with your mech the way you see fit, allowing for action-packed scenarios straight out of your mechanized fantasies.

But Daemon X Machina doesn’t entangle itself in unnecessary complexity, unlike so many other mech-based RPGs or action games. None of the customization mentioned previously is strictly required to complete the story; instead, the only thing that matters is your ingenuity. In fact, you can likely make do exclusively with the weapons you pick up on the battlefield, and never have to bother with the game’s weapon shops or factories. Daemon X Machina ensures that the most important thing in each of its battles isn’t the weapon you wield, but rather your ingenuity in using it. If one gun isn’t working in the current mission, just head back to the hangar and try a new loadout.

For instance, one point in my playthrough saw me stuck against one boss with a seemingly endless HP bar that was difficult to whittle down, no matter how many shots were fired. However, after numerous frustrating failed attempts, some new types of weapons made short work of this previously daunting adversary, turning the boss into a shattered wreck. Daemon X Machina might be an action game, but by no means is it mindless. This freedom of strategy, combined with the flexible customization and accessibility, is what makes the gameplay loop so addictive.

Daemon X Machina is a balanced, deep, and approachable experience that should please players new and old.

It’s a shame that this excellent action is obscured by the game’s truly dreadful story. Of course, action games aren’t necessarily known for their poignant narratives, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but in Daemon X Machina’s case, the poor storyline distracts from the action. The story begins with a simple premise: a portion of the moon has exploded, and its remnants have corrupted the world’s robots to rise up against humanity. Beyond that beginning, the story devolves into a complex feud between different corporations and mercenary squads, often acting less like a sci-fi adventure and more like a political drama — and not a particularly good one, either. Worse yet, this story is populated by one-note characters who often spend minutes at a time musing upon the nature of warfare and humanity, using dialogue that would fit right in with any generic fantasy novel. At the very least, the voice actors all do a great job, bringing their cardboard characters to some degree of life.

Thankfully, there is respite from the dismal narrative in the form of side content like the ‘free missions’ and multiplayer mode. By forgoing the confusing and uninteresting story, these features focus solely on the strong gameplay loop. That said, it is nonetheless disappointing that one of the game’s most significant modes is tarnished by such shoddy execution.

However, the visuals don’t suffer in this way. Instead, Daemon X Machina features a breathtaking cel-shaded graphical style with a vivid color palette of stark reds, oranges, and greys that makes much of the game look like it flew straight out of a particularly stylish manga. The Japanese rock soundtrack does provide a fitting backdrop, but the tunes generally don’t manage to be quite as memorable as the graphics.

Daemon X Machina easily stands out for its polish, style, and accessibility, giving players the freedom to choose whether they want to focus on the best customization or craft the most creative strategies of their own. There a few rough edges due to its repetitious missions and uninspired story, but when the core content of the game is so enticing, most players should be able to overlook them. All told, Daemon X Machina is a balanced, deep, and approachable experience that should please players new and old.

‘River City Girls’ Review: Brawling with the Best

In a generation defined by massive open world experiences, there’s something decidedly cozy and cathartic about settling down with a well-made beat ’em up. The prospect of Wayforward (the lauded developers behind the Shantae series, A Boy and His Blob, and Ducktales: Remastered, among others) working on a modern take on the Kunio-kun franchise was a delightful surprise when it was revealed this past spring. Several months later, River City Girls has largely exceeded its lofty expectations.

Revenge Never Tasted so Sweet

Best friends and high school ruffians Kyoko and Misako are lazing about in detention when Kyoko suddenly gets a text showing their boyfriends (series mainstays Kunio and Riki) being kidnapped. Enraged and worried, the girls set out across the expansive River City to track down the kidnappers and get their beloved boyfriends back.

It’s a fun twist on the classic series premise, and River City Girls has an absolute blast playing off of that. Though the personalities of the girls are a bit one-note (the classic “sweet and sour” archetypes are alive and present here), the stellar writing elevates the colorful cast of modern day River City. Just like with Wayforward’s beloved Shantae series, the studio absolutely nails bringing major and minor characters to life in the most endearing of ways. This is only exemplified by top-notch voice acting across the board, especially in the case of Kyoko and Misako. Chatter between the girls is natural and entertaining, and their interactions with the other whacky characters in River City are a treat.

The search for Kunio and Riki spans across six large sections of the city ranging from the high school to the docks to the skeezy streets of downtown. Every location is segmented into roughly 15 screens that can often be explored via branching routes, with some inaccessible until a certain quest or story requirement is met. There’s plenty of creativity in the level design here; though screens never feature drastically different layouts, they’re all visually distinct and flow together to paint a full picture of everything the city has to offer.

No Punches Pulled

Story, characters, and level design are all well and good, but beat ’em ups are nothing without tight, addictive combat. Luckily, River City Girls has this in spades, and demands quite a bit of arcade-smart skill from players even on Normal difficulty. Kyoko and Misako boast the same base movesets with unique animations: light attacks, heavy attacks, and aerial attacks with ground attacks and a basic block thrown in for good measure. The repertoire is concise but offers a variety of ways to string together fluid combos that feel great to execute. A laundry list of unlockable moves can also be learned in the Dojo, providing plenty of depth to those who want to fully customize their fighter.

Be it with the base moveset or more advanced maneuvers, taking the time to master the combat is a must. Though running into enemies and light attacking them to death might work for a bit, it doesn’t take long to learn that River City’s hooligans are no mere punching bags. Bouts require less focus than a 1v1 fighter, but mindlessly spamming moves won’t get anyone anywhere on their first run. This is essentially ensured by brutal boss battles that bookend progress between sections of the city.

As one might expect, it’s these boss encounters that are the real highlights. Some require proficiency of certain mechanics (side-stepping, wall-jumping, etc.), and have patterns complex enough to warrant several attempts before succeeding. Each boss encounter also feels like an event, featuring beautiful introduction cutscenes and Vs. screens before the showdown. The only downside to these is that they have to be manually skipped upon every subsequent attempt; the game doesn’t remember that they’ve already occurred.

Another issue is that anything bought in the game and used during a boss fight completely disappears after losing. While most games would load in the player’s inventory from before the battle, River City Girls punishes item usage when it counts the most. Having to grind enemies for cash isn’t particularly difficult, but that coupled with needing to backtrack to a shop (since there’s never one right before the boss encounter) is unnecessarily tedious and slows momentum down considerably.

A Cloudy Diamond

This string of minor yet gradually grating issues extends beyond boss battles. The menu system is needlessly cumbersome, requiring players to cycle through six screens to find the right options. Story and quest-specific NPCs are easy to miss because they don’t have any kind of outline or indicator making them stand out. Furthermore, items in shops are marked with “???” until after they’re bought and used or looked up in the inventory menu. This makes it easy to waste tons of cash on items only to be disappointed by their luck-of-the-draw effects.

And yet, for all those niggling design flaws, River City Girls is simply a blast to play. It especially excels as a handheld experience. Feeling the impact of every hit with HD rumble made fights more engaging, and the classic beat-em-up structure makes it perfect for whipping out in short bursts. There’s a good amount of content here, with the main game running about six and a half to seven hours before New Game+, which adds additional playable characters with their own unique movesets and animations (albeit with no new dialogue, making character interactions and cutscenes rather awkward).

If you’re looking for tight beat ’em up action with some truly impressive production values and lovable characters, you can’t go wrong with River City Girls.

‘Super Kirby Clash’ Review: Star Allies Meets Clash Deluxe

Sub-games: a highlight of the Kirby series. Megaton Punch, Samurai Kirby, Strato Patrol EOS, Snack Tracks, Speedy Teatime, Kirby Quest, and the list goes on. HAL Laboratory has time and time again created memorable mini-games in the Kirby series that have outshined even the core campaigns in fan discussions. These are bite-sized games that every Kirby fan has fond memories of whether it be a master showdown that involves quick reflexes or an eating frenzy that would make any other video game character explode.

Sub-games have always been an integral part of the Kirby franchise ever since Kirby’s Adventure on the Nintendo Entertainment System. In recent years HAL Laboratory has debatably mastered the art of creating more intriguing sub-games than core campaigns for their fired-up super tuff pink puff’s latest entries. Some of Kirby’s side-activities have gone on to spawn their very own entries outside the main series.

Team Kirby Clash is one of the many sub-games that appeared in the Kirby 3DS entries, specifically 2016’sKirby: Planet Robobot. Team Kirby Clash went on to receive its very own Nintendo Eshop free-to-play exclusive spin-off game on the 3DS alongside Kirby Fighters, King Dedede’s Drum Dash, and Kirby’s Blowout Blast. The sub-game transformed into Team Kirby Clash Deluxe, but now the side series has taken a drastic leap from the Nintendo 3DS to the Switch- and for the better.

It is no surprise why Super Kirby Clash would be HAL Laboratory’s first choice for a Kirby sub-game spinoff that could make a comeback on the current Nintendo hardware after a mainline entry. Clearly, it was the perfect sub-game for the handheld home console hybrid that shares an emphasis on local multiplayer. Just as in the vein of Kirby Star Allies, the game is easy for anyone to pick up and play together; it is simple entertainment where you can easily find yourself a few local or online buddies and bang out a few levels in less than an hour.

The concept of the entire game is to defeat the level enemy and move on to the next, while continuously upgrading your Kirby at Magalor’s shop with an assortment of various weapons, armor, special items, and emotes that resemble different callbacks to Kirby’s history- that is all there is to it. It is your standard Kirby game control-wise, except no copy abilities or repurposable enemies and the hero with an insatiable appetite has been thrown into a boss rush of over 100 enemies to battle it out with.

Microtransactions are typically the major fear when it comes to free-to-play games, but this is certainly one of the very few exceptions of a game from the genre where you will likely never have to think about spending a single dime unless if you are completely impatient with minor grinding or perhaps you just want to show the developers some love. The in-game currencies [gem apples and vigor] are given out after matches, waiting certain periods of time, can be harvested (gem apples only), and collected in batches through various secret passwords inputted through a small statue found on the right side of the hub world.

Super Kirby Clash is, for the most part, more Kirby Star Allies and even more Team Kirby Clash Deluxe with a new coat of paint and that’s great for both casual and hardcore fans who are looking for more Kirby games to play while holding them off for the next core entry. Microtransactions never feel forced, the four-player co-op can be entertaining yet hectic just like previous games in the series, the online works flawlessly, and the amount of content will keep fans of the pink puff locked in for a couple of hours without having them to worry about paying for an entirely new game.

For being a free-to-play game, this is well worth the few minutes it will take to download. It is just right for the fans and for those looking for some quick fun. It is definitely no masterpiece or something to run home about, but once again it is free. Go grab three friends and give it a shot! You can never go wrong with more Kirby!

‘Blair Witch’ Review: Lost and Confused in Woods

It’s hard to imagine an Xbox game called Blair Witch being released in 2019, and it’s even harder to imagine that the title would somehow end up being just so…. average, especially given the track record of the franchise. Sure, the title is based on the 1999 cult horror film The Blair Witch Project, an absolute classic, but the horror franchise certainly hit rock bottom with its abysmal 2012Book of Shadows and 2016’s Blair Witch (they couldn’t come up with a better title?), setting the bar either tremendously high or fantastically low depending on who is asked.

When announced at the Microsoft E3 press conference in Los Angeles, Blair Witch appeared to be a major studio release in the vein of the Outlast or Silent Hill franchises, taking spooky night-vision action for a fright-filled romp in the woods. However, it’s a disappointing duty to say that no description could be any further from the truth. Although Blair Witch for Xbox One is supported by some great endgame moments and some absolutely next-level dog mechanics (yes, dog), the title is ultimately just an average low-budget thriller with occasionally frustrating gameplay elements and sub-par level design, making for a pretty run-of-the-mill overall experience, and a pretty average entry into the Game Pass library.

In Blair Witch, players are placed in the shoes of Ellis, a discharged police officer and war veteran searching for a missing boy in the woods outside of Burkittsville, Maryland. With his dog, Bullet, Ellis must brave the terrors of his past and the horrors of the forest during his journey, using his wits and flashlight to stay alive while being hunted by something fierce and evil.

Over the course of the adventure, Bullet the German Shepard absolutely steals the show, and is the highlight of Blair Witch, serving as an essential part of the experience while leading players to clues, signaling the direction of enemies, and offering cute breaks from some of the more suspenseful action. Controlled by a skill wheel that has ‘heel,’ ‘stay,’ ‘search,’ ‘reprimand,’ and ‘pet’ commands, Bullet actually has the most intuitive dog mechanic incorporated into any game on the market. Even better, he also serves as a driving force in the narrative, giving players more emotional stakes to play for than any missing kid.

Bullet is a Good Boy

Speaking of story, Blair Witch honestly makes a genuine attempt at capturing the magic of the franchise, striking some relatively high notes that are overshadowed by primarily low points. The beginning has Ellis primarily getting his bearings (and subsequently losing them) in the forest, and is relatively painful and monotonous, playing like a hiking simulator full of aimless wandering, invisible barriers, and retracing steps. To create an uneasy atmosphere, the game attempts to play psychological tricks on players by having paths lead back to the same location, but it mostly just leads to frustration. It’s understandable why Blair Witch would have such features incorporated into its level design, but the overuse becomes unwelcome as the game progresses.

That being said, the title does find its stride more towards the end, and actually settles in for some pretty emotional, terrifying, and impactful moments of gameplay — although even these highs are worn down as the setting and narrative begins to outstay its welcome. Even for the six or so hours that Xbox’s Blair Witch clocks in at, the repetitive ‘getting lost in the forest’ mechanic makes it a chore to get to the conclusion. Supposedly, the story features multiple endings that are decided by how players choose to move through the narrative, but it’s debatable whether it would be worth going back for another run to see what other outcomes could be found.

Besides Bullet, Blair Witch also has another interesting gameplay element that makes for some rewarding moments: a camcorder that can manipulate the environment depending on its tape. Often used in puzzles, the watching and rewinding of found footage tapes provides some fun moments — although fleeting and short-lived — that hearken back to the roots of the series. For most of the narrative, however, the camera is generally sidelined in favor of the trusty flashlight, which has a stronger beam and illuminates more surface area.

Unfortunately, the most disappointing part of Blair Witch is that the experience feels so unexpectedly low budget, detracting from tension and atmosphere. The environments and textures look woefully outdated and formulaic, the voice acting is fairly mediocre, and the sound design is pretty bland. Sure, Blair Witch stands on its own and definitely slides by as average as far as comparable horror games on the market, but in a genre that survives on building an immersive and frightening world, it’s hard to want to cut the title any slack.

That being said, with Xbox Game Pass and a free weekend, the title might be worth a quick playthrough for someone that enjoys the Blair Witch franchise or a good scare. For those willing to take the ownership plunge, Bullet is absolutely the highlight of the experience, as the cute doggo’s gameplay and narrative experience is probably worth a few hours of time. To get to these moments, however, players should be ready to endure some otherwise mediocre gameplay and graphics. While certainly not great but definitely not terrible, Blair Witch could serve as a fun Friday night group game or a Saturday binge experience, making for a casual diversion worth the Game Pass price.

Goomba Stomp is the joint effort of a team of like-minded writers from across the globe. We provide smart readers with sharp, entertaining writing on a wide range of topics in pop culture, offering an escape from the usual hype and gossip. We are currently looking for Indie Game reviewers.