Am I bad in bed?

I never thought that I was bad in bed, but the last two guys I dated were totally into me...until I slept with them. The first time it happened, I thought the dude was just commitmentphobic, but when the second guy dumped me, just two days after having sex with me, I got worried. Is it possible that I'm so lousy in the sack, a guy would break up with me over it?

I doubt that sucky sex skills are the reasons why these dudes dumped you. Honestly, in the early stages of dating, a guys much more preoccupied with his own performance than with yours. Later on, when you get more serious, your bedroom prowess (or lack thereof) may become an issue, but not after one night together.

Another reason I'm skeptical is that if you were truly awful in bed, don't you think youd know by now? I'm assuming you've been with more than two guys. So if there were an issue, it would have come up before. It's not like you suddenly lost your touch.

But let's say for argument's sake that it is the sex. Some possible deal breakers: You lay there like a yoga mat, were squeamish about something, or happened to have an unfortunate, um, odor.

Most likely though, it's not any of those scenarios. Maybe you were too clingy and immediately assumed that one night of sex meant an instant relationship. Suggesting that you spend the whole day together, making plans for the future, or asking him where he thinks things are going are surefire ways to freak out a dude.

A couple more possibilities: These guys could have been dating other people or maybe they're just both freakin' jerks. Regardless, you're never really going to know the truth, so stop stressing about it. If you bring anxiety into your next sexcapade, then that whole "bad in bed" thing might very well become a self-fulfilling prophesy.