I'm about to hit the roof!

Registered User

I'm so sorry, but I need to let off steam. My Mum is now totally immobile. I got a call from the district nurse this afternoon to say that even two people can't get my Mum on her feet. She had wet herself and was very distressed. She called the out of hours doctor who called for an ambulance. I believe they were thinking of getting her assessed to find out why she can't stand up.

I've just called my Mum and was told the ambulance man wanted a word. He is refusing to take my Mum to hospital because she doesn't have a medical condition. I've been arguing with him, but he says A&E will just send her straight home. I can't believe they could do this to an 84 year old woman with angina, end stage renal failure and Alzheimers. Yes, it may be a care problem, but until they can get a hoist into my Mum's place, there is nothing they can do for her.

I've phoned the out of hours service who are getting a doctor to speak to the ambulance crew. What with her own doctor refusing to come out when called by the carers and the care manager, I just don't know where to turn.

Registered User

Have you tried the emergency social services number? All local authorities have an on-call social worker to handle just such eventualities.

I am so sorry you are having to deal with this like this. I don't know whther it's any comfort but I have heard of ambulance staff refusing to take people to hospital when their own doctor has requested it. The mind boggles. This (and I'm sorry to sound political) is all part of the dumbing down of the health system - even slightly trained staff think they know as much as fully trained doctors. Makes my blood boil.

Make sure you get the full name of everyone you speak to - people can be a bit more receptive if they think things might come back to haunt them.

Registered User

Thanks Jennifer. Having just read Skye's reply to my other thread, I now see the immobility could be due to a UTI. As I told the man on the phone, he has no medical qualifications, so who is he to judge? My Mum had actually been complaining about pain when passing water, so perhaps that is the reason. She should have been on antibiotics 12 days ago, but due to a totally incompentant doctor, they have been left sitting by my Mum's side.

There's goes yet another day when I haven't eaten properly. I actually haven't had a proper dinner since Wednesday night. Since then I've managed one bowl of cereal and a few slices of toast. At least my middle age spread has nearly gone...

Registered User

dear zooey.this might appear that i am being big headed.not the intention at all.

If you phone for an ambulance and you believe the patient needs hospitalising,you must insist.If the paramedic crew disagree,phone 999 again and ask for an ambulance,they will tell you there is one present!tell them you want another one as you disagre with them.Within 2 mi nutes their radio will go off and you will be on your way to hospital.Thats a tip i got from a paramedic on first aid training!don't let them talk over you!love elainex

Registered User

Keep strong and let us all know what is happening if you can. You have had some good advice, I hope it has worked for you. What a very bad situation for you and your mother. It is quite shocking. xx TinaT

Registered User

Thanks to all of you for your help and advice. I didn't know about the on call care worker, so that will be one to remember for the future.

In the end, the out of hours call service supervisor walked into A&E and explained the situation. They said they were more than happy to have my Mum. The ambulance crew must have been told to pull their finger out, but I still got another call grumbling about having to carry her downstairs. I think this is becoming a real issue now, as my Mum is overweight and lives in a first floor maisonette. The stairs are very narrow with sharp turns and I've seen 3 ambulance staff struggle to get her out in a chair. They were unable to get her to one hospital appointment a few weeks ago and the following week they were quick to bail out when my Mum said she was still eating breakfast when they arrived. If we can't get my Mum out of her place when it's necessary, surely she can't be forced to go on living there?

The hospital phoned me several times last night for up to date medical advice. Apparently they can't even access her records at the moment. They seemed to agree that it might be a UTI, but then said she would probably be sent home tomorrow. I just don't get it. Hazel said it could take weeks to cure and if the lack of mobility hasn't been sorted and there is no hoist or updated care package at home, then surely this is wrong?

I've had an early breakfast this morning. Cleaning 45 animals on an empty stomach didn't seem like a good idea.

Registered User

Zooey, you have to stand firm with the hospital, and the social worker should help you with this. The thing is, if they can discharge your mum, the cost of care transfers from NHS to SS -- and SS will fight this.

You need to demand a full multi-disciplinary assessment before discharge. OT should check the maisonette for access, and assess her mobility, and how your mum can manage on her own. If they say she can't manage, she should be recommended for a care home.

Registered User

Thanks Hazel. The care manager is next on my list after the 3 hours feeding and cleaning in the morning. He's a nice young chap - only recently qualified, but very helpful. I almost feel guilty with the list of complaints I intend to hit him with when I get in to work. They're not all his responsibility, but if weaknesses in other areas are going to make large holes in my Mum's "safety net", then she's not receiving adequate care in my opinion. I think I'll give the manager of the care home a ring too.