Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution (ABC, Friday) — “Jamie is shocked by the response of students of Huntington High School when he asks them to choose between a lunch menu of processed junk food or fresh fare.” If you watch this show, you cannot call this a weekend.

Real Time With Bill Maher (HBO, Friday) — Right after I posted that article this morning about Bill Maher being all smarmy, I thought of a joke. Here it is: “you can’t spell ‘smahermy’ without ‘maher’! Look, Ufford. You want to go on vacation and hire a replacement? Guess what, you get replacement-level talent. Suck it.

NBA playoffs (ABC/ESPN, Saturday/Sunday) — If you don’t have a team, read this and then take your pick. Or you can do what I do: interpret fouls as morally-compromising character flaws, then root for the team with the fewest fouls.

Treme (HBO, Sunday) — This is a very good show. Mr. Ufford has offered his take. I’m with him, but I understand the disappointment as well. People wish it were The Wire. Hell, there’s a garbage back near the door of the apartment. I wish that garbage bag were The Wire. That way I wouldn’t have to lug it downstairs. Plus, I could set it on my coffee table and guilt my friends into watching it when they come over. But! It is not The Wire. It is a garbage bag.

The Pacific (HBO, Sunday) — Who is the mole? Spoiler alert: the mole is the human condition!

Breaking Bad (AMC, Sunday) — My favorite show at the moment. I hope Badger makes an appearance. That dude might be the single most worthless zero in the history of television.

I’ll be back for a few posts on Monday before Matt takes over. Don’t tell him that Mr. Jon let you play the vidja games and eat Oreos all weekend. You kids want to get me in trouble?