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12 thoughts on “The Mothers-in-Law Club and Jane Austen”

Proud of my boy! The diamond is my grandmother’s, but he chose the elegant setting on his own. They’d like to be married this August. Needless to say, both sets of parents are delighted but scrambling…

The best thing is to give good counsel over and over and over again. The momentary crises that are inevitable get their attention and they are off and running, We get to sooth, pass the Maalox and give the good advice.

Never give your honest opinion — even when they ask for it. They don’t really mean it. What they really mean is, “Support my position.” So if you can’t, tell them that you have confidence in them, and you are sure they’ll make the right decision. Then pray — a lot.

Part of the trouble is that our children know us too well. One of my friends was planning a wedding for her daughter. She was very supportive and wanted her daughter to have everything her way. Then came choice for the bridesmaid dresses. My friend did not care for the cut or color her daughter chose, but said, sincerely, “They’re lovely. Just right. I like them.”

Except the daughter knew that she didn’t like them and became frustrated..

“The important thing is that YOU like them,” my friend replied. “It’s your wedding and I want you to have just what you want.”

Even so, the daughter was unhappy. It was a no-win situation. The daughter wanted what she knew she couldn’t have—her mom’s taste to change!

When I know that I am letting my younger daughter go for marriage to a wonderful, Godly young man who loves her, it won’t be a problem. My older daughter is married, and I’m the perfect mom-in-law to my son. I haven’t seen either of them for over a year, and I’ve sent care packages to them overseas. Since I don’t know their business, it’s very easy to stay out of it. And, I have no opinions at all. ; )

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