Sunday, June 07, 2009

The following story was submitted by a former House Page from when s/he worked on Capitol Hill.

It's commonplace indeed for staffers to have their Blackberries out doing whatever. I was in the basement of the Capitol, heading towards the Rayburn subway. An intern rushed into the elevator, brushing me aside. He was glued to his blackberry; his facial expression looked like he was looking at nuclear launch codes. But he was playing solitaire. I actually started to laugh at him.

Please Note: This is a "self-account" story, submitted by one of the interns who was present while this occurred.

Satuday night, after a long, formal, internship-program related dinner, six interns were spotted wandering through Dupont Circle. They were heard saying they just wanted "to sit down and have a few drinks" and were ultimately pointed in the direction of 17th street. There was much debate among the confused interns as to where they ought to go before Intern Girl #1 made herself heard: "Ooohh, that place has lots of strobe lights and loud techno music, let's check it out."

The group of predominantly male interns wandered in and quickly realized that they had walked into a gay bar. As they turned to leave, the obviously amused door manager offered to comp their first round of drinks and cover if they would stay, and, being poor, thirsty interns, they obliged. As they were fully dressed in suit and ties, the interns instantly became a novelty for the group of older, gay men at the bar. After three too many long islands, the interns even made their way to the stage of the dance floor to put on a highly embarrassing display, much to the delight of the crowd.

Moral of the story: interns should know where the hell they're going, bring a change of clothes so they don't look like douches out on the town, and seriously, long islands? Try not to scream "unnecessarily drunk" to everyone at the bar.

Just discovered your blog and love it. As someone who interned last year I can totally understand how staffers and DC natives hate interns. Luckily I think the staffers liked me, mainly because I didn't step on their toes and did whatever they wanted me to. Also I was the only intern who could play softball competitively, which was a boost.

But there is something I have to admit. On days we had softball games, I would always sign up to guard a field on the mall, usually taking the 12 PM shift. But really you can't blame me, cause all I had to do was sit in the sun for a couple of hours and it sure beat answering phones and doing mail. And the staffers seemed to appreciate me getting the closest field to the Hart building, so I had that going for me.

Interns - I know you think it's really cool to plan happy hours with your fellow interns after work, I can appreciate a drink or two at the end of the day. However, when going through the metro turnstile, it's not necessary to wait for all your intern buddies right after going through.

Your mass makes it quite difficult for everyone to pass. I promise you'll be fine if you walk ahead a bit.

There comes a time in every congressional intern's life when they feel courageous enough to head up to the second floor of the Capitol Building. One time, two interns took a detour to the second floor and ended up in the Speaker's Lobby. I witnessed them trying to sneak onto the House Floor (during a vote!) only to end up escorted by very annoyed Capitol Police officers.

I think it's safe to say their courage vanished on their way back to the office.

There were ridiculously long lines to get into the Cannon tunnel (with staff-led tours) and on top of that, the ticket machines were malfunctioning for probably 15 minutes. I had been waiting, patiently, in front of the line for tickets, with several other interns.

As soon as the machines started working, this other intern breezes by those of us who had been waiting and demands "12 tickets!" When told it would be a few minutes she flounced off irritated. If she had not, I would have been tempted to get sassy with her. Not sure if this is a pompous enough display of intern exaggerated self-importance, but those of us waiting were flabbergasted.

DCSummerInterns

About Us

This blog is dedicated to those DC residents who eagerly await (or completely dread) Intern Season. Essential to the function of offices in DC, interns are willing to complete tasks that are often considered undesirable.
For many interns, this blog will not apply. For those interns to whom it does apply, we hope that you use these anecdotes to change your behavior and, eventually, change the stigma attached to DC interns.
*PLEASE NOTE: As with the viral nature of the Internet, many offices are concerned about anonymity and poor reflections upon them - please be assured that no office or individual will ever be singled out. This blog operates under complete anonymity and will never be of a libelous nature; it will never post any identifying information including, but not limited to: place of work or residence, name, or congressional office. We welcome you to submit any absurd intern stories you are bound to acquire. TWITTER EXCEPTION: we assume you give us permission to re-tweet any submissions you send our way via your public Twitter account.
To the interns: please use this blog as a learning tool. Godspeed and best of luck this summer. dcsummerinterns@gmail.com