We live in a culture that does not fully understand or embrace this unique trait; intense and passionate individuals are told that they are ‘too much', ‘too sensitive’, 'too overbearing', 'too dramatic', or ‘too emotional’. Many find themselves being misunderstood, plagued by shame or self- judgement, and not being able to reach their full potential.

Our goal is to help you answer these questions:

Is there something wrong with me?

How does being emotionally intense explain my life?

How do I fulfil my potential?

DO YOU FEEL AND LIVE MORE INTENSELY THAN OTHERS?

Emotional Intensity can be expressed and experienced in different ways, for a full description, see here.

You form strong emotional attachments to people, places, and things, or finding separation difficult since a young age.

You may be shockingly accurate in noting the unspoken social nuances and relational dynamics. Even this overwhelms you, you cannot ‘un-see’ things, and you cannot stand inauthentic people and situations.

You have an innate urge to push the boundaries of conformity, even when it makes life difficult for you sometimes.

Being acutely aware of the suffering, hypocrisies and complexities of life, you may constantly feel older than others around you, like an ‘old soul’ that has somehow lost his/her roots.

You are highly driven, and can be 'perfectionistic', which can be expressed as chronic anxiety and restlessness.

You have incessant internal dialogue and obsessive thoughts.

You live with an existential angst, a sense of urgency, an impulse to move forward, and a constant need to learn and explore.

You experience existential depression over the meaninglessness of life, death, and loneliness.

“You think too much.””You are just difficult.”“Stop being so sensitive.””Why can’t you just chill?””You worry about everything.” ”You expect too much from people.” ”I don’t understand why you can’t just let go.”

— Criticism faced by intense individuals,

being labelled with bpd

Emotional Intensity can look like a mental illness, one of the most common labels given to emotionally intense people is Borderline Personality Disorder. Despite being referred to as a ‘personality disorder’,BPD is not a personality defect, but a set of coping patterns that reflects some of your deep unmet needs. The condition is often misunderstood and heavily and stigmatised. For one, the myth that BPD is ‘untreatable’ is an old, inaccurate and very dangerous myth within the mental health industry. In fact, mounting evidence is suggesting the opposite is true.

THERApy and coaching

Different from general counselling, we will focus on helping you make sense of the experience of feeling and living with intensity. More specifically, the life themes of: emotional regulation, owning your intensity, living authentically, and releasing your suppressed creative potential. Our work will be synthesised from well-researched therapeutic models:

I am not against medication or psychiatry as a whole, but the traditional medical system tends to pathologise the most natural human expressions such as grieve the loss of connection, anxiety in a time of rapid change, or anger for injustice in the world.

Intensity, as a natural human expression, is not a pathology in itself. It is important that you honour and celebrate your unique gifts in order to live a life with vibrancy and authenticity. When you can present yourself to the world as who you truly are, you will naturally move towards liberation and self fulfillment.

Because true healing and come from lasting changes on all aspects- physical, emotional and behavioural, our work should be integrative and holistic. Instead of having a fixed, rigid modal, we will find out what works best for you.

3. Addressing the problems at their emotional roots

Personal developmental work is not a plaster- a temporary fix, but more like good nutrition. Drip by drip, it builds you up from the inside, and allow you to grow resilient in the face of the challenges life offers.

By addressing the core memories that generate the presenting symptoms, we make deep and lasting shifts that dispel your struggles at their roots. This is more than just an intellectual/ cognitive process, but involve changes on a physiological, emotional and energetic level.

An eggshell looks tough on the outside, but is delicate and soft on the inside. It is extremely sturdy and resilient, and the breaking of it signifies the birth of a new life. Emotional intensity is what makes you unique and powerful. Many individuals who live intensely have a lot to offer, and deserve a vibrant, meaningful life.

I look forward to being on this journey with you.

For a more detailed explanation of what we may achieve, please refer to the Roadmap.

WHO SPEAKS YOUR LANGUAGE?

Human beings are tribal creatures. However, being exceptionally emotionally sensitive and intense may mean that you live on the margin of society. It can be challenging to find ‘your people’ if you live in a remote area, but even in big cities such as London and New York, you may still feel like an outsider looking in.

Your tribe exists, even it is harder to find it, and “your people” may be dotted around the world, cutting through time and space. You may have to look beyond your immediate surrounding.

With the internet, we can now find refuge in a virtual communal space through online research, art, music, and writing. After years of searching for answers, you might have found solace in reading other people’s stories as an introvert, an empath, or their struggles with chronic physical and emotional pain. Knowing that there are others like you— even when they are a thousand miles away- is a real blessing. Rather than being limited geographically, you now have the option to have a connection with someone you can genuinely relate to.

from misfits to triumph

Up until now, you have not yet grappled with the value of your qualities. You did not get why you feel angsty, impatient, restless and depressed with issues that other people find acceptable. The truth is,

You are a fast-moving machine in a world that does not keep up.

You are the truth seeker in groups that are complacent about hypocrisy.

Your thoughts are critical and challenging when others opt for a comfortable life.

You are a passionate lover in a culture plagued with fear and separations.

In our society, individuals who feel things deeply were pathologised, institutionalised, or were encouraged to numb out their vitality through drugs. Emotionally intense people are being held back by their internalised shame, past baggage, and existential guilt.

Sensitive and intense people are sick, weak, or ‘too fragile for the world’. It is critical that we do not collapse into the trap of pathology. Rather than shrinking and hiding and taking a smaller and smaller slice of life, by learning to ground, build resilience we can harness our strengths.

In fact, emotionally intense people are like canaries in the coal mine. In the old days, miners sent canaries into unknown pits. If the canaries stopped singing, they knew the mine was toxic, and they would stay away. When there are woes in the world, the sensitive souls are amongst the first to take the hit. Your sadness, anxiety, rage are not wrong; They are warning signs of the world’s pain.

Your sensitivity and intensity are the doorways to your fullest potential, and you are not serving the world by playing small.

If I were to sum up my message in three sentences, they would be:

One, there is nothing wrong with you.

Two; not only that, you are in a unique position to do something, create something, stand up for something.

And three; your sensitivity and intensity are not your hindrances, but DOORWAYS to your fullest potential.

Once you have embraced your sensitivity, intensity and giftedness, you will realise that all along it is leading you to your own freedom and peace. You will realise that you have no other choice than to yield to what has been given to you. You will experience unspeakable peace by surrendering to what seems true to you. You can finally stop fighting, stop trying to pretend to be who you are not, or to suppress and hide your sensitive and intense nature.