Further Evidence: Team of Scientists Studying the DIRECTION Dogs Poop

You know an article is going to be a keeper when it contains the words “Czech and German researchers studied 70 dogs during 1,893 defecations…”

According to this piece scientists believe dogs align themselves with the Earth’s magnetic field while shitting. So, all those tight circles your pookie is turning, before serving up an order of yard crullers? He’s apparently trying to find true north with his anus. If you and your friends ever lose your way in the woods, while walking a dog, don’t worry. You’ll now be able to regain your bearings as soon as he craps: “This way gentleman! By the butthole of Victor, we’re saved!!”

I don’t know. You can call me a denier if you’d like, but I’m skeptical. What’s the benefit to the animal? The article says nothing about this. Why does he do it? And how often does it actually happen — what percentage of “defecations” were so aligned? There’s not much information, is there? I’d like to know more. Should I bring in a feng shui master to re-position our toilets? I don’t want to shit a hole in the time/space continuum, or something. Or perhaps I can do better in my career if I go side-saddle from now on?

Also, in the overall scientific pecking order, where does “direction a dog points its ass” fall? Far below cancer research, I’d guess. Are those scientists bitter, or do they view this as an opportunity to shine, and maybe move up? “If I nail this magnetic field dog shit assignment, I’ll be in line for that sweet urethra durability study at Duke!”

Comments

My pit bull/mastiff mix apparently has a direction confusion issue. This morning she shit first facing west, ass to the east, and then a few minutes later pinched off another one facing east, ass to the west. She’s also been known to face SSE and shit toward the NNW. And when she’s in the kennel and not free roaming the yard, she seems to prefer facing WSW with her ass to the ENE.

I suspect the information these guys are after is whether mammals can sense the radiation belts that surround the earth. At this point, we still don’t know how birds migrate or why intelligent primates go to Yuma for the summer. In this case, however, it seems that, as usual, the Germans are full of crap.

Only had a doggie when I was about 6 so don’t have much experience with this . I do remember a boxer that used to do a soft ice cream diarrhea swirl at the end of our driveway that drove my dad nuts. Looked like a carv el special double dip

My golden retriever shits in the same area of our yard every time. I can honestly attest that he has faced in every direction imaginable while doing his duty.
I would proclaim that story to be ‘bullshit’!

What a load of shit. My dog faced any point along the 360º around the compass.
The dogs that drop their offerings along the sidewalk don’t have any common direction they align with either. Some face the sidewalk, some face here, some there, everywhich way.