June 07, 2010

Buddy Parenting

By Selwyn Duke

It seems that the more parents treat their children like friends,
the more unfriendly the world becomes.

While at a recreational facility the other day, I overheard a mother
call her six-year-old son “bud.” No, I don’t think that was his name and
he wasn’t a beer. Rather, the woman was exhibiting what, at least in my
area (NY), has become a meme: addressing your child as “buddy.”
“Buddy” used to just be a relationship descriptive and a generic, if
sometimes snarky, way of addressing strangers (again, at least in NY).
Now it’s a stranger way of addressing loved ones. It has also become
maddeningly common. Right now I’m thinking of two families to which I’m
close, and, in each case, one or both of the parents thus address their
child.

Now, I realize that criticizing people’s parenting is a hazardous
endeavor and that some reading this have gotten caught up in our “buddy
system.” So I’ll be gentle and not start this with a New Yawk “Listen,
buddy....” In turn, I ask that you hear me out.

Comments

Buddy Parenting

By Selwyn Duke

It seems that the more parents treat their children like friends,
the more unfriendly the world becomes.

While at a recreational facility the other day, I overheard a mother
call her six-year-old son “bud.” No, I don’t think that was his name and
he wasn’t a beer. Rather, the woman was exhibiting what, at least in my
area (NY), has become a meme: addressing your child as “buddy.”
“Buddy” used to just be a relationship descriptive and a generic, if
sometimes snarky, way of addressing strangers (again, at least in NY).
Now it’s a stranger way of addressing loved ones. It has also become
maddeningly common. Right now I’m thinking of two families to which I’m
close, and, in each case, one or both of the parents thus address their
child.

Now, I realize that criticizing people’s parenting is a hazardous
endeavor and that some reading this have gotten caught up in our “buddy
system.” So I’ll be gentle and not start this with a New Yawk “Listen,
buddy....” In turn, I ask that you hear me out.