Lollipops and quizzes at WCSU help raise awareness about dating violence

Casey Campbell, 18, of Hartford, an accounting major at Western Connecticut State University, plays a game called Myth and Fact, Wednesday, Feb. 14, 2018. The Women's Center of Greater Danbury conducted an awareness program about healthy relationaships at the University. less

Casey Campbell, 18, of Hartford, an accounting major at Western Connecticut State University, plays a game called Myth and Fact, Wednesday, Feb. 14, 2018. The Women's Center of Greater Danbury conducted an ... more

Casey Campbell, 18, of Hartford, an accounting major at Western Connecticut State University, plays a game called Myth and Fact, Wednesday, Feb. 14, 2018. The Women's Center of Greater Danbury conducted an awareness program about healthy relationaships at the University. less

Casey Campbell, 18, of Hartford, an accounting major at Western Connecticut State University, plays a game called Myth and Fact, Wednesday, Feb. 14, 2018. The Women's Center of Greater Danbury conducted an ... more

Lollipops and quizzes at WCSU help raise awareness about dating violence

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DANBURY — Casey Campbell wanted more than a lollipop for Valentine’s Day.

The 18-year-old accounting major from Hartford wanted to test his heart to see what he knew about healthy relationships.

So he reached across a lollipop-strewn table at Western Connecticut State University’s student center in downtown Danbury on Wednesday, and put his hand into the bag of facts and myths.

From the bag, held by Sydney Trezza, a campus counselor and advocate for the Women’s Center, Campbell pulled out a little white card that read: ‘Jealousy is a healthy and normal part of any relationship.’

“What do you think?” asked Cara Mackler, a prevention educator at the Women’s Center. “Myth or fact?”

“It’s a fact,” Campbell said.

“Why do you think it’s a fact?”

“Like, every relationship has some,” Campbell replied.

“Okay, well I would probably agree that it is normal for some people to feel jealous,” Mackler said, “but as soon as that jealousy turns into an action that becomes possessive where you say ‘Who were you talking to?’ or ‘Let me see your phone,’ it’s crossed the line into possessiveness and that’s where it becomes unhealthy.

“But yeah, it’s normal to feel jealous as long as it doesn’t become controlling,” she added.

Campbell wanted to play again, which was precisely what organizers from the Women’s Center hoped would happen during Wednesday’s healthy relationship awareness event.

“This is all about awareness, education and letting students knowing we are here for whatever they need to help them,” said Rayna Havelock, a campus counselor and advocate at the Women’s Center, which has offices in downtown Danbury and on campus at WCSU. “If they need to talk, or if they have something happen to them, we will be there with them. They don’t have to do anything alone.”

Most students who stopped at the Women’s Center table on Wednesday did not stay to play the game, but picked up a red-and-white heart-shaped lollipop with a note attached to it about Women’s Center resources.

Some 20 percent of women in college are sexually assaulted, according to national statistics.

The nation’s awareness of sexual assault has been raised in recent months by high-profile men in entertainment and politics being accused of coercion and violence, and losing their jobs.

This is the first year that the Women’s Center used candy and a gameshow-style quiz on Valentine’s Day to get the message out about dating violence, sexual assault, and red flags in relationships.

“What better day to talk about it?” Trezza said.

Campbell meanwhile correctly identified his second card as a myth that sexual abuse only affects girls and women.

His third card read: ‘If you are sexually abusive, you have anger management issues.’

“True,” he said.

“It may be that you do have anger issues, but it is not a reason for abuse,” Mackler said. “People might have anger problems, but they don’t always abuse their partners when they get angry. The reality is abuse is a choice.”