This is a blog about an adoptee and the hurdles that she faces. Life is always interesting.

Friday, June 20, 2008

HERE IS A GOOD DOSE OF SNARK

This came up on my radar. It is a satire written by someone who is delightfully snarky, Ed E. Druckman. Here is the link.

The former Mom of Maddie Spears?

In the latest Spears family chapter, newest potential pop star of the future, Maddie Spears, might have the last name of Jolie-Pitt or Madonna if the price is right.

(Hollywood-CA) You wouldn't think that Jamie Lynn Spears, who this week gave birth to a baby girl named Maddie and is the star of Nickelodeon's popular "Zoey 101", would need to give her baby up for adoption. But vying celebrity earth mothers, Aneglina Jolie and Madonna, both want to adopt the child. The reason? Now that most of the children in Africa have been adopted by the two powerhouse moms, they have turned their attention to children in the United State because, as Madonna put it, "African adoption is so 2006."

It was at a "Save Darfur" celebrity Pictionary event that Jolie made her intentions known. "Look, I want that kid, and that's that," she said to dutiful and mute husband, Brad Pitt. Jolie-Pitt spokesperson, Janine Lindemulder, responded to reporters outside of the Pictionary event, "Brad and Aneglina would welcome little Maddie into their home, not simply as a status symbol, but the prime status symbol in their home." Upon hearing the statement, Madonna, attending a celebrity "Save the Rain Forest" Balderdash event, reacted, "I'm not saying that I would be the better mother for this child, by my name is Madonna. So you do the math."

Politely shoving her daughter and new granddaughter's wheelchair aside outside of the hospital, Lynne Spears was quick to answer reporters' questions. "If you all want to know if my daughter is going to give up her sweet baby, Maggie, for adoption, we would never, never do that, unless of course it would mean an exclusive five-year production and merchandising deal with Nickelodeon and both Angelina and Madonna's prodcos." When a reporter corrected Mother Spears, that her granddaughter's name was not "Maggie" but "Mandy", Spears was quick to recover, "Sorry about that. I do know the kid's name. That was just the Grey Goose talking or maybe the OxyContin."

Jolie was outraged over the comment saying through her spokesperson, "Both Angelina and Brad are as much dismayed as they are shocked about Lynne Spears' statement. No one ever said anything about a merchandising agreement," while Madonna's reply was unsuitable for a general publication. However, it did align Lynne Spears' dietary habits to the stars of the "Two Girls One Cup" video.

And it seems that the controversy has even hit the campaign trail, with both candidates, McCain and Obama, weighing in. At a "Texas Hold 'Em" tournament in Nevada, presumptive Democratic Presidential nominee Barack Obama said, "This is a child's future we're talking about. You don't gamble with that. Get it? Gamble? Of course, merchandising is a given." John McCain was quick to retort, after awaking from a mid-afternoon nap, "Whatever happened to family values in this country. Merchandising rights? Has anyone ever heard of a paper route for a kid to get some extra cash."

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About Me

I can't believe that I am doing this again. I am a Christian. I only become bible thumping when an individual misquotes or misinterprets the bible. Don't ever underestimate me. I am a wife to a wonderful man who is my super hero. I am the mother of five kids now. Two are grown with families of their own. I have three teenage girls. Oh Lord the hormones!

Yes I am an adoptee. It is not all that I am but it plays a key role in who I am. I am not a grateful adoptee but God did place me with a great family.

Currently I am attending college in Houston at a great community college. It is called Houston Community College. Ever heard of it? My goals are to attend Prairie View A & M and become a nurse. I want my bachelors and my masters. I am down to my last semester at HCC. Sadly an individual needs capital letters behind their name in order to be taken seriously

I also have two great dogs, Charlie and Maci, and Lady Spazz, our delightfully queenly feline. I am hoping to convince a wonderful black stray cat to allow us to become owned by her as well. Time will tell. She has already inspected our garage.

I am also a gardener now that my husband and I own our home in Katy, Texas. I love hibiscus flowers, roses, and lily daturas. My kids will tell you that it is mainly hibiscus. I have giants as well as normal ones. I also want another snow Hibiscus.

Welcome and enjoy. I should warn you that I have mellowed some but do not be misunderstood. I believe in adoptee rights period.