Spreading Santorum, #1 Result When You Google "Santorum," 2003-2012

Yesterday I Googled "santorum" and #1 search result was the link to www.spreadingsantorum.com and the not-so-new-anymore definition of santorum: "the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex." (Only "sometimes" the byproduct because, if you're doing it right, there's no santorum!) But tonight when I Googled "santorum"—after getting an alert from a reader—the link to www.spreadingsantorum.com and the frothy-mix definition did not show up as the #1 Google search result. In fact, the landing page for the site did not appear anywhere in the search results. (But the blog that the site links to did.)

This, of course, is what Rick Santorum asked Google to do months ago. Google told Santorum they couldn't, they told Santorum they wouldn't, because www.spreadingsantorum.com was the legit #1 search result when you Googled his last name. It wasn't a Google bomb, we weren't gaming Google's algoribbons or whatever. We were legit.

But tonight we're gone. I'm not too sad about it—hey, we had a good run!—but I am a little mystified. Why now? Was it intentional? Did Google cave to the pressure? Or was this the result of Google tweaking their searchbrainz? Whatever the reason, you can file this one under "careful what you wish for, Rick." Because the new #1 return when you Google "santorum" isn't Rick Santorum's official website, or his wiki page, or news about Rick Santorum's campaign, or Elizabeth Santorum's twitter feed. It's the Urban Dictionary definition for Santorum. And guess what? Their definition is way grosser than the official one:

The sometimes frothy, usually slimy, amalgam of lubricant, stray fecal matter, and ejaculate that leaks out of the receiving partner's anus after a session of anal intercourse.

Um... that grosses me out.

They can remove Spreading Santorum from the search results—or it can fade away, thanks to algoribbon tweaks—and they can remove Urban Dictionary's definition too. But the damage is already done. No one has to Google "santorum" when they see a headline like "Santorum comes from behind in Alabama three-way." Everyone gets the joke without anyone having to look it up. The new definition is out there. Mission accomplished. Rick Santorum is this century's Vidkun Quisling. (We're still the #1 result when you search "santorum" at Bing.com.)