Bussel, who is well-versed in kinky fiction, gave an insider look at real-life BDSM, including tips on how to safely engage in submission. She advises readers to "agree on a safeword, which means if one of you wants to call things off or pause, you can say the word and automatically halt the action." She also explores the appeal of power play, positing that "BDSM can show you sides of yourself you’d never considered before."

She dismantles the myth, perpetuated by Christian Grey in Fifty Shades, that people who like BDSM are damaged; "the idea that everyone who practices BDSM is automatically suspect is a problem."

For people just getting to BDSM, Bussel recommends attending a "munch," a local gathering of like-minded people who can introduce newbies to the community and help them meet new partners. Cleis Press also has a comprehensive collection of BDSM books.

Rachel Kramer Bussel regularly writes for and appears in Salon, Jezebel, Bust, Cosmopolitan, The Huffington Post, The Daily Beast, and more. Based in New York City, she is a prolific erotica author and editor, and her titles include The Big Book of Orgasms, Best Bondage Erotica 2014, Twice the Pleasure, and Cheeky Spanking Stories. Visit her at rachelkramerbussel.com and lustylady.blogspot.com.