It’s natural to think of ourselves as small in terms of the world we live in. One person among billions. One voice. One set of thoughts. Insignificant when you consider the stuff going on around us.

But what if that is just a thought . . . a self-limiting belief that, far from being humble and realistic is actually holding you back from being the person you want to be. Someone who could, in fact, help change the world . . .

What about the simple act of sitting on a bus? Well that’s exactly what Rosa Parks did in Montgomery Alabama when she refused an order from the driver to relinquish her seat for a white passenger who was standing. That incident sparked a new consciousness in America and Rosa Parks became an international icon of opposition to racial prejudice. For sitting on a bus . .

Whether it’s changing the world on a grand scale like Rosa Parks or changing the world in terms of the immediate environment we live in – it is in all of us to make that happen. And here is how . . .

One: Recognise and confront your fear.

You may not think you are fearful. But yes - we all have it to some degree. It's endemic in our society – sometimes inherited from our childhood, from society, our friends, the media . . . Well . . . you are worthy. You are important. And there is no reason at all why your views and ideas don’t have a right to be aired.

Two: Avoid those who bring you down.

You know who they are. Those around you who subtly take the carpet from under your feet. Who criticise without providing a helpful alternative. Who smile and laugh while at the same time make you feel less important and less worthy. Instead, seek out those who you aspire to be – who encourage and love you no matter what. Those who genuinely want the best for you.

Three: Research and start talking about what you feel.

What you really feel. Not because you are comfortable that people will agree with you, but because it’s coming from your soul. Talk from knowledge. Research your topic. Read and understand the different points of view. And above all – concentrate on and learn the facts.

Four: Notice those who don’t agree with you and be ok with that.

There will always be people who disagree. That’s just like the sun coming up in the morning. They have a view and they are entitled to it – but it doesn’t affect you. You don’t have to fight them, and you don’t have to win anything. It’s not a competition and in many cases there may be elements of their argument you agree with. And that means you are learning.

Five: Reach out to others that share your view.

There is strength and support out there which is available for you to tap into. To give you confidence, a sense of self-worth, feeling proud and grounded.

Six: Take action and be brave.

Make a list of all the actions you could take. Leave nothing out, even if you don’t feel it’s something you would be comfortable with right now – just write them all down. Make an appointment to meet and talk with someone who could help you make a difference. Write a blog. Share your views on social media. Offer to deliver a talk for a local group. Make a plan and start right now – today . . .

None of these steps may seem particularly hard. And like so much in life things aren’t hard, but they are hard to start – to make a beginning – to take that first step. Anne Frank’s quote is so full of optimism – isn’t it indeed wonderful that that we don’t need to wait a single moment before starting to improve the world . . .

​We have choices in life. We can call a cup half full or half empty. We experience a rainy day and feel down that its wet or uplifted at the thought of being snug and cosy inside. We can see a person's bad points or their good ones . . .

It’s easy sometimes to get caught up in our quest to become the person we want to be. To achieve. To accomplish. To gain. But unless we appreciate and give thanks for where we are right now, we run the risk of always chasing. Planning and working to get better, fitter, stronger, wealthier . . .

Today I had an awesome day. I’m grateful that the sun was out. I’m grateful that I have the fitness to bike for five km to go for a swim. I’m grateful for the beautiful lake I swam in. I’m grateful that my washing was drying while I was out swimming and that I have a washing machine at all.

These may seem small things, but I need to remember how many people in the world do not have the opportunities and resources that I have. And while I have dreams – I also love and am grateful for the step-by-step journey I am taking . . .

The story behind this quote is about sugar. Gandhi was once asked by a woman to talk to her son about cutting back on sugar. He asked them to come back in two weeks time, at which time he talked to the boy and made an agreement. In answer to the mother's question - "why could you not talk to my son at the start?" Gandhi replied that he wasn't able to talk to the boy until he had first tried making that change himself.

We are so quick to judge. To have an opinion. To demand change. To expect our leaders, our managers, our Government to be responsible for making change happen. And fast.

But what if we simply lived the change we want to see in the world? And by our actions, someone notices and copies. And then someone copies them - and so on and so on . . . Take the challenge - think of something you want to change - and quietly go about making that change happen in your own life, thoughts and actions. And just notice what happens . . . !

With current political headlines on how the President of the USA reacts to those who he disagrees with, I was drawn to Mahatma Gandhi's thoughts on showing compassion and friendship to your enemies.

It is easy enough to be friendly to one's friends. But to befriend the one who regards himself as your enemy is the quintessence of true religion. The other is mere business.

It's certainly true for me. I find it hard to instinctively feel any kind of empathy for those who I dislike. I find the views of people who are racist to be abhorrent for example. Or those who are violent, rude, obnoxious . . . Yep its hard to feel anything warm for people like that.

But here are some more thoughts on that . . .

Is that person causing or encouraging me to have similar traits? Umm . . . no.

Is the way I am feeling about that person causing me pleasure or pain? Well it's not the former.

Why is this person exhibiting this behaviour? What has happened in their life? What troubles and anguish have they gone through and how are they feeling? Hmmm . . .

If I was in that other person's shoes, what would I be feeling, saying, thinking, doing . . . ? Good question . . .

Cultivating compassion for those we don't like is maybe one of the hardest things, but also the most liberating. Putting yourself into someone else's shoes. Understanding things from their perspective. Becoming aware that people who exhibit qualities we don't like may in fact be crying out for help. And above all, being thankful for the teachings that person has given us.

Go on . . . try it . . . starting with just one "enemy" . . . right now.

I am sitting here listening to a mantra. A mantra is like a repetitive chant, and this one is set to music. It's sort of chill while also a little upbeat, if that makes sense. The words are simple - “I am” – again and again. And as I listen and think I have decided to be instinctive and fill in the missing bit.

So who am I?

Well there is who I am right now and then there is who I want to be. I think of those two stages as being very different, particularly while I’m not feeling particularly good at the moment. Maybe that’s why I am putting pen to paper.

So being honest and being real about how I am right now . . . Well I’m not at the depths of despair. In fact my life might seem pretty good. I’m travelling for a few months with my wife. I have left a good job behind and stand a reasonable chance of being employed there again on my return. I am in the opposite hemisphere to my home, which means two summers in a row. We have experienced sights, sounds and experiences – many of them magical. But at my core I’m not so good.

What I feel is unfulfilled and trapped. I am a dreamer – always thinking of stuff like designing a home, writing something amazing, being a coach, an environmentalist, a motivator. And then there is my everyday life which for some reason always seems to present blockages. Practical things, stuff people say, my own self-doubts, fear and negativity. I feel like life, my life with all its potential gloriousness, is passing me by.

I feel a bit like that doctor who is painstaking when assessing their patient’s needs but lax on their own health. The builder who lives in a forever unfinished house, the plumber whose toilet doesn’t work . . . If I want to be a person who can help people then the first person I need to help is myself.

Author

Hi I'm Richard Norris. I live in Wellington, New Zealand, with my wife Jolanda.

After many years or working and observing human nature I decided to launch www.itsgoingtobegreat.org - all about happiness, mindfulness and feeling great. ​Much of the material is taken from everyday life experiences. My motivation is to give something back to a world that has given me so much - and the hope is that someone, somewhere reading this just might realise some of their dreams.