I'm a simple girl with a li'l dream, of seeing her humble works in exquisite print, to share with all who feels for words, writtenwith an unsupressable urge. So indugle in my fantasies, and plow your way through my memories, greatly appreciated you will be, if you can leave your comments here for me.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Today I lost another friend. I don't even know how he died. Some said it was a disease. Whatever it was, it was too sudden.

On May 12, 2008, Frank Lee added me as friend on Facebook. A couple of months before that, I bumped into him when I was out shopping. We chatted briefly - and I chirpily made one of those empty promises which now, I would never ever be able to fulfil. I said we should catch up for tea one of these days.

I really like Frank. He's your Mr Nice Guy - patient, kind, softspoken and caring. He's a bit of a geek - but he's always very pleasant to hang out with.

He was also my ex-colleague who had left the company barely a year ago. He is always smiling, always willing to help. He was such a bubbly and optimistic guy that we enjoyed teasing him. To us, he was "Frank Lee Speaking" (a pun on "frankly speaking"). Having worked with him for a while and interacted with him on a daily basis at work previously, his passing left me reeling with extreme shock...and a lot of pain.

In a fatal stroke, everything was taken away from him. His wife-to-be, his future, his career, his life, his family...and our tea date. News of his death drowned me like a tsunami, paralysing my senses. I wanted to deny it so badly. For once in my life, I want to live in this lie.

But the verdict is sickening and final. He's no longer around.

I feel my heart plunging to my stomach. The sense of loss is overwhelming. Why him? Why now? Why does it have to end this way? He was only 32.

Frank - I am so, so sorry. I wished we had met up for tea. I wished I had been more proactive and communicated with you more actively on Facebook. I wished I knew you more. I wished this wasn't real. I wished I was more of a friend than a colleague. I wished I could have done more.

But I know now no matter how hard I wish, you are gone forever. Once again, I was too late.