Chris Huhne’s bisexual girlfriend ‘definitely bisexual’

The bisexual partner of disgraced for Lib Dem MP Chris Huhne has been confirmed as being bisexual, according to every news report ever.

Despite the blanket coverage of the scandal continually referring to the MPs bisexual girlfriend as bisexual, it seems much of the public were unsure whether Mr Huhne’s bisexual partners was in fact bisexual,

‘This clears everything up’ commented Eastleigh resident Harry Penk ,65, ‘Despite all the news reports, I still wasn’t sure whether someone who is definitely bisexual was actually bisexual. It’s a relief to find out that bisexual women do practice bisexuality in all its bisexual forms.’

However legal experts were quick to point out that, while informative, the earth-shattering revelation should not influence the case against Mr Huhne. The BBC’s legal correspondent Joshua Rosenberg explained,

'Like many I am delighted to learn that a committed bisexualist regularly bisexualises in her spare bisexual time. But, bisexual or not, this has no bearing on the charges the bisexual woman’s partner faces. There is a possibility that the media’s continual references to a bisexual’s bisexuality might be a thinly disguised ploy to make Chris Huhne sound that little bit more seedy, guilty and possibly a bit bi himself. Fortunately there’s not much chance of that happening.’

Yep. Collected a friend from hospital today. Took the opportunity to read one of the numerous complimentary Daily Mails in the waiting room (it was that type of hospital). Amazed at the amount of coverage and the sheer quantity of 'bisexual' references. DM operating at the very top of their game I though.