Below freezing temperatures? Snow in May? Russian climatologists – not those duped by political science – are predicting a global cooling for the next two centuries. What?!! How can this be?!!! Naturally, such wisdom flies in the face of progressive logic that demands citizens and businesses be regulated and taxed in order to fulfill the left’s ultimate agenda: maximize control of the populace under a New World Order of supreme statism. These same hacks, tirelessly backed by Hollywood’s attempts to brainwash the adoring masses, claim anything within the realm of life and weather – tornadoes, hurricanes, blizzards, rain, snow, wind, sunshine, the Cubs losing, higher STD rates, school shootings, alien abductions – is the result of Global Warming. Yes, I too enjoy science fiction; just not the kind that results in idiotic legislation, enduring annoying celebrity propaganda, and being forced to pay higher taxes so Snuffleupagus can get a sex change under Obamacare and compete in the Olympics as a woman flying the LGBT flag. Isn’t it bad enough we already have Big Bird on the payroll? 1% crooks!

I have no doubt the rise of proliferation of mankind impacts Earth’s climate to some degree; that’s inevitable. However, to blindly say it is the impetus of apocalyptic doom, fire and brimstone, is irresponsible and nothing more than fear mongering. Our species is but a spec in the face of nature’s unadulterated power. The slightest degree change in the earth’s rotation/tilt and our beloved planet is either incinerated or a frozen wasteland. How is it again 1934 was the hottest year on record during industrialized America? No, I’m not suggesting we shouldn’t protect our environment from toxins or the atmosphere from floral carbons and other harmful emissions. Absolutely not; we must always strive to safeguard our children and nature’s blessings! It simply means society must exercise common sense, incontrovertible scientific data, rather than political activism when addressing such delicate matters.

Contrary to popular belief, conservatives love the outdoors as much as, if not more than, their liberal critics. In fact, I’m betting far more work, thrive, understand and play in nature’s backyard for it is a preferred way of life. This being said, if politics were synonymous with pragmatism, God forbid, every dictionary and textbook would accept this revised definition of Global Warming: a political phenomenon where undesirable though natural climatic cycles coincide with liberal aspirations. See also: Al Gore, DNC, LSD. That’s right…just say no to drugs and socialism so you won’t need surgery in Mexico for being crushed by an imaginary, transgendered elephant that stole your food stamps in order to quench its undying thirst beneath the sweltering heat emanating from the back of the unemployment line of “occupy” opportunism! Ironic? Not if you’re a liberal.