Travelers and Wanderers around the Universe

Monday, July 20, 2009

I don't know if it's just a hormonal change but I am deeply in pain thinking that my eldest brother is gone, that I would never see him anymore in this world. During my late brother's wake, I kept and tried my very best not to show my emotion because I wanted to be strong for my mother, my sister in law and her kids, and for my siblings. Although deep inside my heart was bleeding and wanted to scream.

It's when we came back here that I let go of my emotion, of what I feel, and just cried it out on my husband's shoulder. It's been almost a month since he died but I am still in denial of the whole truth. Every time I think of late brother and father, I feel like a thousand knives are going in and out of my heart.

I did not know that the ride he gave me during our visit last March will be my last ride with him. Please Lord, give me strength to carry on and accept the truth that he is now with You!

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travelers' comments:

I am so sorry for your sorrow and loss.Losing loved ones is not something we ever get over. We eventually learn to cope with it. We never forget because they were part of who we are. This is why memories are sacred...without them we have no life history.

Our memories are what we take with our spirit. It is not the material things nor is it the actual human body.

Your brothers are in a happy place...be happy for them. Your sorrow is because you are still here...it is the ones left behind that suffer the most!

I feel you tsang, kaya nga death is my fear. mas gusto akong mauuna. I dont want to see any of myfamily you know, hard to say the word. But wherever your bro and father right now tsang they are always there watching over you and your family, as well as his family back home. Just be strong and pray that God will give you streght and be able to accept the truth. Although it is really hard, but little by little you will be able to accept it tsang. Ang bata pa naman ng brother mo ano.

I'm so sorry to hear that, we have nothing to do about it, life is like that, sometimes you're happy sometimes you're sad. But God really cares and He sees our pains and hurts, He understands... Just trust Him!

i'm sorry for your loss. hindi ko alam kung ano ang dapat sinasabi para maconsole ang isang tao sa mga panahong ganito. ang alam ko mahirap at alam ko na all i can give you is a smile and a prayer for you and your family to be granted more strength to overcome the sorrow.

every time I open this blog and read your post I feel sad. nakakaiyak rose, honestly nakakasad yong story. Nawalan rin ako ng papa many many years back and I dont have brother at all, but I am happy i have 4 brother in law na matuturing brother na rin.

i know that is hard for all of you Rose. I was having teary eyes reading this post.Time will help you to cope with your loss. Ganyan naman talaga ang life what will remain to us is the memories in our heart and life will go on.

May he will rest in peace sis....I agree with Bamz....let it out....wag mong kimkimin yung nararamdaman mo...scream if you would like to....it will affect you all the way....God is always there sis....I know for sure that he will give you courage and strength to cope up with all these happenings.

Rose, it is okay to grieve and cry. It will make you feel better when you let your emotions out. Lucky you, for you have a husband who lend his shoulder for you to cry on, supported hubby, too! I salute you for being a strong woman who have been through a lot and still standing, a rock for you own family as well as for your immediate family. I am sure in time wounds will heal...and your mother and brother's family will feel better. Condolence again, Rose.

Don't worry, Rose honey..Just believe in your heart that your brother finally meet his true lover, God! He rests in peace.. no more pain.. no more hurt feeling.. only peace! He does happy there, honey!

Now, stand up your shoulder and cheer up.. your husband needs you as well as your lovely children. Show them that you're strong, have a big heart and I'm sure the pain will go away.. ^_^

just be strong Rose.i can say it more easily bec i am not in your position,but don't get me wrong,i sympathized with you since the first time i read your blog about his death. We filipinos have difficulty overcoming loss of a loved one.