Gold Member

I had sex with and dated guys with bigger dicks than my husband and I can say quite honestly that my husband is the best. It's not always about size. Yes, it's nice to be stretched but that doesn't mean the sex is better.

Gold Member

My GF has had a lover w over 9, she didn't like the intercourse... Just too much she says. She says that I'm the perfect fit for her. And the only guy to give her an orgasm from fucking ... She is however a total size queen, the bigger the better she says.., but it's mostly visual I think. When it comes to sex it's more about technique and the right "fit"... And I've never known a woman to say that size is at the top of her sexual priority list...

Gold Member

I'm not a girl but my experience at the larger end of the size spectrum is that some women are passe about larger sizes and some women are into larger sizes, and some women are really into larger sizes. Unlike 12barblues I have come across women with minimum size requirements that even though I am longer and much thicker than average, I didn't meet. When it comes to smaller than average, some women have confided that they ended prior relationships because of penis size.

Like 12barblues I find that some of the turn-on with size is visual and tactile. They like to look at a large penis or try to wrap their fingers around it and not have them touch. In the case of smaller than average size the turn-off seems to be more physical. I have been told quite a few times that they just didn't get sufficient physical stimulation.

Beyond these observations, I know that most women don't mention size so as to not hurt average-sized men's feelings. It's not common for women to mention larger size, and if a woman does mention a larger size then that's probably what she wants or what she's missing.

VerifiedGold Member

Advice: Stop worrying about it! It'll hang you up and throw you off your game; you'll be unable to perform at the top of your abilities. So she mentioned a former beau with a bigger penis than yours? Doesn't matter if you can step up and make up for any "lack" of size with technique, endurance, and other skills - get her cumming 'til it doesn't matter how big/small/whatever your cock happens to be.

And honestly based off all that I've read here on SF, discussed in real life, and so on - women ultimately don't (generally) place major importance on penis size. There are Size Queens, but they are few and far between. The ultimate concern is what you can do, not just sexually but as a whole person.

Gold Member

First things first, the majority of my life's orgasms have happened without a dick even being present... And plenty more have happened with fingers and tongues, which aren't comparable in size to the penises I've seen.

Anyway, I've only had penetrative sex with two men, who were fairly comparable in size. The better of the two was the (very slightly) bigger one, but it wasn't better because of size. There was less insecurity present, more trying new things, more talking, more laughing, and consequently... more moaning.

Gold Member

First things first, the majority of my life's orgasms have happened without a dick even being present... And plenty more have happened with fingers and tongues, which aren't comparable in size to the penises I've seen.

Anyway, I've only had penetrative sex with two men, who were fairly comparable in size. The better of the two was the (very slightly) bigger one, but it wasn't better because of size. There was less insecurity present, more trying new things, more talking, more laughing, and consequently... more moaning.

Click to expand...

True... Bigger penis can mean more confidence .... And THAT can be a turn-on and important to a woman. More so than the actual size itself...
And I just remembered.. I DO know one woman who has a minimum size requirement. She is the sister of a friends wife.. Only met her once.. She was very petite ....lol

VerifiedGold Member

Advice: Stop worrying about it! It'll hang you up and throw you off your game; you'll be unable to perform at the top of your abilities. So she mentioned a former beau with a bigger penis than yours? Doesn't matter if you can step up and make up for any "lack" of size with technique, endurance, and other skills - get her cumming 'til it doesn't matter how big/small/whatever your cock happens to be.

And honestly based off all that I've read here on SF, discussed in real life, and so on - women ultimately don't (generally) place major importance on penis size. There are Size Queens, but they are few and far between. The ultimate concern is what you can do, not just sexually but as a whole person.

Gold Member

Same with me.
I am low average in size but not lacking in confidence whatsoever which BTW was learned.
Without undue modesty I can joyfully and honestly report being the donor of many penetration multiple orgasms with a variety of female sexual partners.
As observed in a current related thread it is more about mutual mindset than anything else.
Confidence is sexy which in turn leads to arousal.
Being familiar and confident with the use of your tools does make getting the job done well.
Or else all the above is hot air and it is still all about size after all and mine happens to be just right size to stimulate their G spot

Gold Member

Right now I have a vision in my head of all the nature programs I have seen that depict how the male of a certain species tries to impress a female. I find things that some bird species do to be the most fascinating.

It's not like all you men out there are parading around naked with your cocks out, making them pulsate and look as impressive as possible to be the one to get the girl. Sure I like the visual of a big one, especially in porn, but honestly I'd just assume you demonstrate your humor, playfulness, kindness and respectfulness. If you can sing or play a guitar, well that's all the better. My husband is all these things, and physically speaking, I do love what he does with his cock, and that thing he does with his eyes is really spellbinding. I discovered his cock long after I discovered all the other things, and I would have been hooked regardless of size.

I guess I wonder why your gf mentions her past lover's penis size. What would be the point of that unless that was the sort of talk that she knew turned you on, which obviously it does not. I personally don't care to hear what my husbands past lovers did or what their body parts were like. He has never said, and I don't share from my past experience either. We never decided ahead of time to handle it that way, but that is how it has turned out. I do, however, know exactly what some of his exes looked like since we knew each other for a fairly long time before we ever dated.

Gold Member

My advice: talk to her, ask her what she likes, then come up with solution, example if she says "well, I do like it a little bigger" = buy her a dildo and fuck her with it sometime. If you really are too short in length for her, she can still get a lot of different kinds of orgasms from your dick. Orgasm through deep penetration is just a treat, if it matters that much to you to please her, you can do so with a toy, a pretty hot solution if you ask me.

Size does matter for certain types of orgasms. Y'all can't honestly tell me that you enjoy fucking a pussy that can't take you balls deep for example. You can make do with just penetrating her with the tip, but it's never going to be as good as going full in.

And if she is too long in length and you cannot press the tip of your penis against her cervix, you don't know what you are missing for yourself either!

Thankfully women can orgasm in a bajillion ways with penetration so it's not like you have to rely on deep penetration alone to give her orgasms. It is personally one of my fave orgasms though.

She might not even like it like having her pussy beat up to the cervix. I don't think a lot of women do...
Besides, a lot of women don't even orgasm through penetration, do you know if your wife does? Maybe you are better just focusing on fucking her and stimulating her clitoris at the same time, maybe trying some dp with clitoral stimulation for an intense orgasm.

If I love someone having sex with them is so much more than some random fuck, it is more intense, more orgasmic, more passionate, I could be dry humping him and staring in his eyes and still orgasm insanely. Just touching him and seeing his reaction would make me cum.
There is no point in worrying about your penis size, it's not like you are going to be starring in a porn video next to Mandingo. Make love to her, don't just try to fuck her and you'll see, it doesn't matter.
Sex should be so exciting that you have 0 time to worry about your dick. That's not the only thing that pleases her anyway.

But if we are talking about meaningless sex, then yeah, vagina size and penis size matters, the better the fit, the more both partners can enjoy fabulous orgasms. Guys want giant porn star dicks but the majority of girls are only able to handle an average length or less in their vaginas, some less, some more - all girls are different, just like men, what will feel best for them depends on what they personally enjoy and can take.
It's ridiculous to group all women into one category. We do not all like small dicks, or average dicks, or big dicks or humongous giant dicks, we all like different sizes. You can't say that all women can tolerate the same size either, because we can't. We're all different.
A penis that is too long hurts excruciatingly because it stabs into the cervix, literally can feel like a knife, trying to have sex with something too big is really uncomfortable. It can suck for men too, a lot of men I know are so sensitive that having a woman who is too small in length for them can be painful too!

I prefer a size that is perfect for me and me alone, that allows me to take his whole dick deep, but not too deep, so that his balls slap against me while he thrusts.
There is some information going around that women mainly orgasm through the vaginal opening... it's bullshit. We can also orgasm intensely all the way down, even on the cervix, and if your dick is so small in length that it can't reach the end of her pussy, then she won't be able to orgasm from deep penetration, but thankfully a woman can orgasm in a lot of other ways. The cervix can actually take quite a beating, the more excited she is, the more it softens and becomes like elastic able to produce the most wicked orgasms you can imagine, still not a lot of women get past the initial sharp pain in the cervix that can radiate quite far caused by deep, rough sex.

When I shop for a dildo I buy one that fits just right for me, and that size isn't considered really huge in porn either, I think it's just an inch bigger than what is considered average. But it's not like the man I love is a sex object that I shopped around for. Sex with him means more than that to me and is far better than anything my dildos can ever give me, or anything that any random person could give me, better than anything I have ever had before. He's a bit bigger than what i can handle so there are times that it hurts me and feels uncomfortable, we just work around it.

If I was single and just looking around for casual sex, size would matter to me because I wouldn't care about anything else, and if I wasn't really desperate to get fucked, I would choose a man with a dick that would fit in my pussy just right.
But you should love your wife, she should love you, sex should be more than that to you. There's more to love and life and sex than penis and vagina size.
You can make it work with any size really, but there is no denying the fact that the perfect size for you is going to feel just amazing.

Sorry about the really long reply, it sort of happens when I get tired.

Gold Member

This is not about every woman in the world, but rather the OP's wife and her hints about a previous, bigger lover. I will recapitulate that I have had sex with a number of women who quite clearly stated they preferred men with bigger penises, particularly thicker, and I don't think it had anything to do with orgasm during intercourse. The phrase I have heard several times is 'I like to be filled and stretched'. It was odd that several women used exactly the same phrase. Clearly these women had been filled and stretched before me.

I have also come across women who had a minimum size requirement, and I have come across many women who didn't express a size preference. I have also come across women who were scared of my size and reluctant to have sex wtih me.

So for the OP's question; his wife may prefer men who are larger. Maybe when women have experienced a larger size they may want to enjoy an equivalent size again.

Gold Member

Gold Member

With my first girlfriend I was very insecure about my size which actually affected my overall confidence outside of sex (shy, timid, not very social, etc...). She too mentioned that her ex was larger, but she actually orgasmed more with me. I believe my insecurity is what led me to be curious about penis myself, and eventually trying it and now my wife has a 'lover' lol. So, stop thinking about it, just accept what you have, there is always someone out there better, stronger, etc... nothing you can do. What you can do however is to give it your all with what you have, go down on her, learn certain angles, learn what drives her crazy, etc...

Many many years after that 1st gf, I eventually was told (through a friend of hers) that I was the best she has ever had (she's married now).