Cheerful Abundance

a field notebook of suburban life

How To Be A Genius (just like me!)

There are a lot of ways to be a genius, but the best way is to accidentally forget to remove the Hallowe’en decor from that kitchen window that is so inconvenient to reach that basically you forgot it existed. Then, put your holiday lights up during a bright sunshiny afternoon, so that the silhouette of a crazed lunatic with a knife blends invisibly into the drawn blind behind it. Next, put your tree up, front and center in the living room window, and when that is complete, start thinking about what kind of awesomely artsy photo you could take of your tree from outside, through the window, with the house lights reflecting upon the snow. Oh, look out Instagram!

As soon as it is dark outside, run out in your house slippers, in the snow and ice and negative degree temperatures, and start snapping away, only to realize:

2. Nothing says ‘Christmas’ and ‘Festive’ like a murderer in your window.

3. Hallowe’en was 6 weeks ago. The rest of the windows came down on November 1st. That means the neighbours across the way have been enjoying our lone serial killer in the window for the past 6 weeks and didn’t tell us. We see them at the bus stop every day. Did they think it was left up on purpose? Did they assume that was our Thanksgiving decor?