I'm not saying China owns a lot of our debt, but I was asked if I wanted MSG on my tax return check this year...Doesn't the idea of the streets of Paris filled with effete, beret-wearing men denouncing gay marriage sound like an unused Rod Serling screenplay?...Why isn't Obama out there every day saying that radical Islam obviously clings to their guns and religion?...John King just tweeted me to tell me that Thomas Dewey is the President...I've known people in dialysis who aren't as dependent on a machine as Obama on his 'prompter...Obama is funny. I wish he had his own late night talk show and Craig Ferguson was President...As I watched all the awe-struck acolytes in the press corps at that dinner looking up at Obama, I finally figured it out: he's Frank Sinatra, and the press is Peter Lawford...Compared to the press's fawning over Obama at the Correspondent's Dinner, Tony Robbins crowds look like Nuremberg juries...My advice: avoid the liberal media. Quit idiots like you quit cigarettes. It's hard for a couple weeks, but then they're out of your life...When Obama finally gets his own Presidential Library, the entire thing will be in fine print... And dot's dot, folks!