Aaron’s challenging all of you to click the god damn button that removes all of your friends from the mailing list of those stupid Facebook “Movies” quizzes.

No, I don’t want to take an Incredible Hulk quiz, a “Who’s Boobs?” quiz, or a quiz on 80s movies that every single person in their twenties has seen approximately three thousand, two hundred and thirty-eight times. (Oh really, Lloyd Dobler is the main character’s name in Say Anything…? And she gives him a pen as a break up gift? I was stumped there for a minute.)

You know, I’ve put some serious thought into making this into a blog where I just highlight ridiculous things from the numerous listservs that I’m on, but I think it might be better to keep it as a once in a while thing. It’ll be more fresh that way.

But anyway, here’s an excerpt from an email that got sent out on the Cleveland Park listserv, which basically tells you everything you need to know about the neighborhood:

Just a quick note to report yet another mischief/criminal type
incident in the neighborhood. Two nights ago a couple of the houses
in the 3100 block of Rodman Street were pelted with eggs. As best we
can tell, it happened in the middle of the night and the eggs were
thrown at the rear of the houses and onto the rooftops. One window
was broken. Nothing was taken–more mischief than crime but a real
pain to clean and, of course, repair in the case of the window. An
empty egg carton with an unfamiliar brand (not typical of the local
grocery stores) was found nearby.

Oh noes! Egg-throwing? We should probably call Homeland Security on the double. This gets double stupidity points for actually coming on the heels of a few emails about people attempting to break into houses by asking for people that didn’t live there. (You know, it’s really almost the same level of crime.)

I mean, the last time I checked, kids get the summer off from school. But don’t ask me – I just watch a lot of Law and Order, and probably aren’t qualified to make conclusions regarding this hideous and unsolvable crime against humanity.

From a message that I just recieved from my friendly neighborhood listserv:

Our long time maid has given up house work and is devoting her efforts
to ironing. She’s been with us for 30+ years and is very nice and
works hard. If any of you have need of a part/full time ironer, please
let me know…

Wait, what? I too have a “professional ironer,” although they go by the more common name of “dry cleaner.” Or, in a lean month, “Aaron.”

Not to be crass, but there can’t be any real money in this, can there?

“Let’s get dangerous” in other languages

The show was dubbed in several different languages for international distribution. As such, the catchphrase Let’s get dangerous! had to be translated into a similarly catchy phrase for the target language. It often did not keep its literal sense, as a direct translation of the phrase was unlikely to hold the same impact.