Wines, Goltis and All

Indian or Thamizh food is not for fine-dining. But if you have to insist on a wine, there is the Gewürztraminer varietal. Known to complement “spicy” food like Mexican because of its spiciness and aroma, the Gewurz does not quite go as well with sambhar and palak paneer or whatever the hell North Indians eat with their Dunlop tire naan. However, alcohol and food are acquired tastes and response to tastes can be faked, though not as well as goltis fake resumes, references and now account books.

America has given mankind many things, important among them fast food/beverage and impatience applied to industrial techniques, resulting in the glorious construct of rapid mass-production. Oaking wines is a slow, expensive and time-consuming process. The American genius came up with fake-oaking by dipping huge oak-bags — like tea bags — in wine drums. The results put even the goltis to shame. Usually.

Anu, the most revolting drink known to mankind is the “mango panna” from any of the garden variety ‘home style’ vadakathi restaurant. I thought it would be like pure mango extract and was salivating. Instead what i got was a green vasthu with some karaboondhi floating on it. The waiter said “kachcha mango extract sir”. Hindi theriyama orre kashtama pochu anniku. That would be revolting by garbasthree standards.