Jurassic Park Franchise brought to life using fossilised Spielberg DNA!

Live and let Dino!

Yes Jurassic World hits cinema screens this week by a miracle of modern science.

The franchise, thought to have become extinct, was reanimated last year using blood from a mosquito which, having bitten movie mogul Steven Spielberg, then unwittingly flew into some tree sap and was preserved in amber.

The DNA was then mixed with that of director Colin Trevorrow to create a new monster, even scarier than before.

The monster then tore through Universal Studios devouring plot lines and casting directors as it went.

From the remaining pile of torn limbs and splattered entrails a new movie was cobbled together.

Sadly there wasn’t enough DNA to revive the flagging careers of Sam Neil and Jeff Goldblum, both of whom will be appearing as mannequins in a small shop in Denmark for the next ten years.

Also Sir Richard Attenborough was also unable to attend having used mosquito repellant all his life his DNA is not believed to be anywhere in the fossil record!