Why You Shouldn’t Follow Your Dreams

Back in the day, you were taught the path to success is only reachable by following strict directions: get into this school, take this class, do this internship, wear this respectable red and blue striped tie worn by every CNN anchor and job interviewee ever, etc. But thanks to a growing number of (free!) resources that encourage scrappy, do-it-yourself personal development—from TED Talks to Skillshares to inspiring dog Instagram accounts—the barriers to getting where you want to go are crumbling. There’s practically no excuse to follow that dream of becoming the next Mark Zuckerberg or the world’s greatest puppeteer.

What’s that you say? You’d rather forge a path of regret? If not following your dreams sounds like the thing for you, here are some reasons why you should just suppress your goals, embrace the status quo, and binge-watch bad tv loudly enough that you can’t hear your own thoughts!

1. At work, you love watching the clock count down to 5 p.m. like it’s the Times Square Ball Drop.

If you weren’t monitoring every second like an Olympic time keeper, you might forget it’s lunch time!

2. It’s easier to live vicariously through people who’ve followed their dreams.

It’s so easy, you can do it on a couch in pajamas while browsing Facebook on your phone!

3. Having a cold or particularly strenuous bowel movement is actually welcome because at least you don’t have to be at your desk.

Bring on the uncovered sneezes and extra Sriracha!

4. Not being brave enough to try something different is, in itself, brave.

You’re standing up to your own aspirations and saying “NO, I JUST WANT TO LIVE IN MY SAFE BUBBLE.”

5. Never taking risks and knowing exactly what’s going to happen every day of your life is a great way to make sure you can always be home in time for your favorite show.

Who needs DVR when you’re the architect of your pre-plotted, never-evolving destiny?

6. On your deathbed, you want the devastating realization that you wasted +/- 50 years of your life doing things that never really interested you.

At least Netflix brought you joy.

All this hitting a bit too close to home? It’s never too late to bust out of the backseat and start grabbing the wheel of life. Our new book, Roadmap, is all about doing just that. Grab a copy and start driving.