Saturday, May 8, 2010

Most Spectacular Yawn Award:SMH journo Kellie Hush at the TAFE show (I think. My memory's getting a bit smudgy). I wouldn't normally be picky about this sort of thing, as I know how deathly tired I was by the end of my first day, and Hush was probably there all week. But there was something horribly fascinating about watching Hush's gaping yawn, especially since she didn't cover her mouth. Meh, I'm still a huge fan.

Worst Networking/ yucky schmoozing award:Has to go to the guy who asked me "Aren't you a stylist for Harper's?". I truthfully replied in the negative (a mistake, perhaps). He grunted an annoyed sort of 'oh' and spun away, eager not to waste his time on a nobody. Tacky.

Best unexpected appearance of an obscure sport on the catwalk:I'm not gonna lie - seeing a rhythmic gymnast at Australian Fashion Week was kind of the highlight of my life. Naazmi Johnston did a lovely routine to begin Miss Unkon's sugary confection of a collection.

The Naomi Campbell Award for Catwalk Stacks:Elliot Ward-Fear might have had a brilliant collection but it was difficult to notice, so distracting were the tumbling models in his show. One could hardly blame the unbalanced beauties - the wedges Ward-Fear put them in were absolutely ridonkulous-high. I was particularly concerned for the welfare of the model who had to take a turn in the shoes whilst also wearing epaulettes embellished with long perspex spikes. Thank god she was one of the few who didn't eat shit on the runway, as there would have been all kinds of brain-impalement had she fallen the wrong way.I'm actually kidding about not having noticed the collection - I though parts of it were quite great, but hopefully this episode will teach Ward-Fear not to go for spectacle over substance again. I noted with amusement and a little bit of annoyance that when it was time for him to walk down the runway with two of his models, he kept a bit of a distance - worried about being dragged down with them, Elliot?

Proud Parents Award:Whilst watching the swimwear collections I noticed that the middle-aged couple sitting next to me were only paying attention to one model. During the break between collections I asked if she was their daughter and they excitedly replied yes. It was absolutely adorable seeing them nudge each other whenever she came on the catwalk and I'm pleased to say that I didn't have to stretch the truth when I told them that I thought she was stunning and had a very good walk. Her name is Victoria Lee and she is with Chadwicks - I'd really love to see this girl go far.

Most mildly irritating misnomer:Ok, this might be controversial but I really, really don't think the pants at Nookie and Ellery should be described as 'flares'. They bell-bottoms, bitches and it might seem like a finicky distinction but... so's your mum.

Best Corporate Sponsorship:Well, I don't know if True Blood counts as 'corporate' but word on the street was that had it not been for the TV show's support, St Augustine Academy would not have been able to show their collection. Goody bags included the soundtrack to the show. Tasty. It should be noted that despite some product placement in the show, the integrity of the designs was not compromised. In fact it was probably the most exciting show I saw all week

Rosemount Australian Fashion Week is all wrapped up for this year so I though I'd give some awards based on the little bit of time I spent there.

Award for Getting My Goat:Front Row-ers taking photos on their iPhones/ Blackberries/ DSLRs. Hey guys, turn your heads about 5 degrees and look yonder down to the end of the catwalk. See that large group of flashing people holding cameras? They're photographers. They take photos of the clothes - it's kind of their job and they know what they're doing. How about you look at the live garment (which is surely the point of going to a fashion show) rather than peering at the blurred version on a 15 x 6cm screen.

GMG Award runner up: Fashionable lovelies who can't take a compliment graciously. Word to the wise, ladies, 'I know' is not an acceptable response to 'You look amazing'.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I have never been a fan of Alex Perry's work. I find his clothes boring and derivative. I think he does way too many uninnovative sparkly dresses. I think he needs to take those goddamn sunglasses off his head when he's judging on Australia's Next Top Model.

His latest collection is in large part no exception to the sparkly dress rule, but for a few pieces. Still sticking to the beaten-path, Perry has clearly been influenced by Dolce & Gabbana's Fall 2010 Ready-to-Wear, so let me tell you something about that particular collection. I was recently waiting for a delicious takeaway soup at my favourite Vietnamese restaurant when I came across these images in one of the (somewhat worse for wear) magazines the lovely owner provides for her patrons:

I stared at these photos until my soup arrived, which was a while because as we all know, quality food takes time. I was mesmerised but not because I thought Abbey, Natasha, Freja and co. look good. In fact I think they look ridiculous. Why? They're too fucking thin. Their legs look like those of a pre-pubescent boy and it doesn't help to see them assembled en masse. The blazers reinforce that effect, only overwhelming the models' diminutive frames further.

So how does Perry fair with his version of the jacket/ no pants look? Well I'm actually pleased to say that I think he does much better.

Perry has succeeded in making his models look down-right sexy and while there is a nod to the strong shoulder trend (which indeed shows no signs of fading) he doesn't go overboard with the feature.The pink fitted jacket is particularly lovely and I feel that the combination of the nipped waist, strong shoulders and (crucially) a relatively flat chest is an interesting suggestion of 1940s styles - a directional change which comes as a great and pleasant surprise to me.

I don't know why, but I've always been drawn to the label Ellery. I actually think it might be because their name rhymes with celery, but that doesn't make complete sense because I don't like celery. So bland and watery, you know? This isn't bland and watery though:

Fucking fabulous. This outfit makes me want to go and watch Velvet Goldmine (but I won't because that movie makes me cry).The weird thing about Ellery's collection is that it starts of with such a bang and then sort of fizzles. It's a shame because I think the first few pieces are stellar and show a really luxurious interpretation of the bell-bottom (they are NOT 'flares'). I remember a year or so ago Kate Moss wore a pair of black bell-bottom pants and everyone was sort of holding their breaths to see if it would become the rage... it didn't. Maybe now the time is ripe. You first.

I absolutely adore Zimmerman's latest collection. I am so totally impressed by the unusual palette and styling, and how they somehow managed to make soft-touch floral prints look strangely sinister.

Among my favourite pieces is this shirt-collar blouse and pants ensemble. The suspension/ cage feature is unusual and innovative.

Miu Miu started drawing us back to buttoned-up shirts with pieces like this:

And indeed Miuccia's influence is felt in more that a few pieces in this collection. On the whole, however, I think this is a beautiful and original showcase of Zimmerman's talents and the designers definitely deserve some major praise for it.

If this collection was a song it would be Like A Drug by Queens of the Stone Age. Sexy and dark, y'all.

You may recall that Camilla & Marc's collection at last year's RAFW was strongly influenced (ahem...) by Balmain's glam rock styling of the season before. While sticking to a similar silhouette this year, I feel that this time C&M have takes their cues from another sibling design duo, Rodarte. Here are two piece from the Rodarte Fall 2009 Ready-to-Wear collection:

I love a lot of what Camilla & Marc do, but I think they would do well to shut themselves off from international collections for a while as comparisons like the one above do not reflect well on the local label.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Stop tryna have a Rick Owens moment. The collection was monotonous, uncreative and tediously long. I'm not someone who thinks fashion has to always be beautiful, but this was bleak beyond belief.And the condom-shower caps were dumb.If this collection was a song it would be that stoopid Marilyn Manson cover of Tainted Love. Pointless and kind of a downer.

I'm tired of thick belts, and I really think that Ginger & Smart's collection would have been considerably more sophisticated had they dumped the chunky and dated obi-esque, leather straps that hugged high on their models' waists. Perhaps that's just me though, so never mind.I've always got a mildly 1930s vibe from G&S (which I adore) - it's something about the way their soft fabrics drape from a natural waist, over the jutting hipbones of slender lovelies that I find so appealing. Maybe because of this, I think the design duo disappoint when they try too hard with volume. Whatever, there was more than enough of their trademark style to please me, and the shoes were bangin':

I was rather TO'd by this number, however.

Seriously, you have the opportunity to present at the most important event in Australia's fashion calendar, and THIS is what you want to show?? Lame and lazy.

Hello, Lisa Ho. I like a few of the pieces in this collection (hint: look down to see which ones). They have a nice bland, cruise collection-y vibe that I'm not averse to. I'd especially like to see a bitchy, blonde, tanned, anorexic woman wearing the white shirt and skirt ensemble. On a wharf, ideally.

A pretty start to Rosemount Australian Fashion Week, tiding me over as I unpatriotically wait for juicer fruits in the form of the MET Costume Institute Gala.

p.s. Are Ho's hos wearing Prada heels? I must confess I don't know the go when it comes to shoes in most Australian fashion shows.Here are the heels I mean: