Re: Am I gay?

Posted by Elizabeth on April 12, 1999, at 9:59:08

In reply to Am I gay?, posted by Ashley Hendrickson on April 11, 1999, at 15:26:33

Ashley,

You might be, or you might not. A lot of people who are primarily heterosexual develop an interest in someone of their own gender at some point in life. I met a number of people in high school and college (I graduated a couple years ago) who "came out" as gay or bisexual, but I also met people who experimented with homosexuality and later decided they were straight. I think that only time will tell. Either way, there's nothing wrong or unreal about what you're feeling.

I'd be more concerned about the effects this will have on your relationship with your boyfriend and your relationship with your female friend than on its long-term implications about your sexuality. Does she (your friend) know you feel this way, and is she attracted to women?

By the way, I'm sorry that this Cheryl person decided to take this opportunity to mouth off about her religious beliefs. Personally, I think that only *your* religious or spiritual beliefs apply to you, so you don't need to be concerned about hers. If you share Cheryl's beliefs, though, it could be a problem for you if it turns out that you are gay or bisexual. I met a guy in group therapy once who was gay but had trouble coming to terms with it for cultural reasons. He had a lot of emotional problems that I think resulted from not being able to accept himself. If you're in this kind of situation, where you think you might be gay but you've been taught that it's "wrong," it probably would be a good idea for you to get counseling to try and sort things out and prevent possible future problems with your self-image and relationships.