by thefulltiltlife

Bellbottoms – The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion

It strikes me sometimes that our parents change and grow concurrently with us over the years. This weekend my Mom commented that she regrets telling us kids to “just get over it” as often as she did. Of course, sometimes we really do need to take ourselves less seriously. But other times our disappointment, frustration, anger, and sadness weighs heavy with validity, and affirmation and acknowledgement is appropriate.

“Sometimes it just sucks,” she said to me Saturday. I tried to protest, “It’s fine, really Mom.” But she wasn’t taking it. “How about, instead, some honesty: trying to trust, trying to remember we are loved and accepted and cared for deeply; but, still sad and frustrated, still disappointed and even lonely.”

Let’s name it, sit in it, allow it to co-exist with all of the “fine” in our lives. I don’t want these feelings to overshadow all the good. They certainly don’t negate the good. But to acknowledge the ebb and flow of the good and the bad, to let that be perfectly okay, that seems more realistic than “it’s fine” all the time.