One is 4 years old. Her mother really wants her to speak English as much as possible, but when I tell her to repeat something she never listens. The only way I can get her to repeat is by not doing things I want her to do (I use puppets that she likes to order around) unless she gives the commands in English. The other way I can get her to talk is through iPad games that force her to talk into them or through using a recorder that she talks into.

My question is should I start disciplining her with time outs during our hour and a half lesson if she doesn't listen to me when I tell her to repeat something? Does anyone else use time outs during private tutoring?

The other option I'm considering is a sticker chart where if she gets twenty stickers she gets a present. Does anyone use these approaches?

Sometimes I feel I am a bit too soft with them. They are both learning, but sometimes, for example, I will ask them to do something and they will just say "No" and I will let it slide and move on to something else.

My other question is how fast can this girl learn English at two lessons a week for an hour and a half? So far she's learned around 150 words including 28 verbs over the course of five and a half months. Do you think this is enough time per week or does she need more lessons?

Posted: Wed May 21, 2014 9:58 am Post subject: Re: Discipline with private 4 and 6 year old students

TeacherMan wrote:

I have two private students that I am teaching.

One is 4 years old. Her mother really wants her to speak English as much as possible, but when I tell her to repeat something she never listens. The only way I can get her to repeat is by not doing things I want her to do (I use puppets that she likes to order around) unless she gives the commands in English. The other way I can get her to talk is through iPad games that force her to talk into them or through using a recorder that she talks into.

My question is should I start disciplining her with time outs during our hour and a half lesson if she doesn't listen to me when I tell her to repeat something? Does anyone else use time outs during private tutoring?

The other option I'm considering is a sticker chart where if she gets twenty stickers she gets a present. Does anyone use these approaches?

Sometimes I feel I am a bit too soft with them. They are both learning, but sometimes, for example, I will ask them to do something and they will just say "No" and I will let it slide and move on to something else.

My other question is how fast can this girl learn English at two lessons a week for an hour and a half? So far she's learned around 150 words including 28 verbs over the course of five and a half months. Do you think this is enough time per week or does she need more lessons?

What are you saying?! I know this was a while ago but absolutely do not punish her for not repeating after you. Even if she isn't repeating it doesn't mean that she isn't learning. If you punish her about speaking English, it certainly will not make her speak, but it might make her resent the language.

Trust me, she will talk when she gets ready. Have activities where she is listening to you and for example, you are drawing things and holding the crayons so that she must talk in order to order you around.

I think she has enough lessons, that is quite a lot for someone only 4 years old.

It is not unusual for a child to resist repeating things parrot-fashion.

I often see parents make this mistake, they want to teach their child English so they say English words to the child and urge the child to repeat them back. The child usually cooperates once or twice but then the parent immediately corrects the pronunciation and keeps insisting on it until the child becomes discouraged and decides English is too hard and boring anyway.

I would say that it's necessary to be strict if a child misbehaves or is cheeky but I never punish for failure to speak. Instead I look for a way to make the child WANT to speak. For example the child has to name the clothing item in order to be able to put it on or name the flashcard and then try to throw a pair of socks on it.

If you play language games with your four year old pupil that are fun for her then she'll be far more likely to cooperate, though it sounds like you are doing a great job what with all the vocabulary you have taught so far.

The other option I'm considering is a sticker chart where if she gets twenty stickers she gets a present. Does anyone use these approaches?

I have always used the reward system. But 20 stickers is too hard a ladder to climb. You can start with small gifts so she can get the reward right away. This way she will understand that listening to you or behaving well will lead to an immediate reward. This will also condition her brain to keep doing good until it becomes a habit. You may also prepare a bigger reward later on.

It would also help to establish a set of rules before the class starts rather than telling them what they did was wrong after they've done it.