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S E P T E M B E R 2 1 , 2 0 0 3
M E L A T O N I N , G U E S T E D I T O R
FEATURED IN THIS INSTALLMENT:
Something Absolutely Enormous - eidetik
Haunted House - BMC
The Leeches - Jobe
The Tunnel - BMC
The Old Farmyard - Heckat
Adventure: A Non-True Story - trilobyte
ice-cream - AlterEcho
The Red Box - Gnarly Wayne
Alex at Recess - Melatonin
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GUEST EDITOR'S NOTE
Once upon a time, ka-BLAM!
And it dropped in your lap, two decades in the making.
This is it. Where the began begun. Little girl/boy writer-child on a
carpet floor. Picture crayons. Picture fingers darting. Picture a
beanie with propeller blades spinning. Did you ever wear one of those
propeller beanies? I sure did. Iím wearing one now. Whee.
(I am flying.)
Once upon a time, once upon a time.
(blink)
Once upon a time, we were children.
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Something Absolutely Enormous
by eidetik, age 6
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Mmmmm. Heather had the bigust idea she ever thot of. She was going to
bake a honmungis cake she had enough stuff to bake sum. I am going to
bake a cholite cake. Yum yum yum yum yum yum.
A bunch of this a bunch of that so far so good. The family said mmmm
what is that, you have so much stuf how are you going to mix it in a
mixing bole. I WILL MIX IT IN THE BATHE TUB. Oh my I ges I will have
to give everyone a bath now. Oh no I areeety put it in. OH! How are
you going to mix it with a mixing spon. Oh, I will yous das BIG stick.
Oh kay I will go now. Oh kay.
A bunch of this a bunch of that. A A A now I have the cake dow. In
comes her mother. Ah, ah how are you going to bake it. Mmmmmmm. The
cake factory with the big ofin they never yous. Yes, Iíill yous it.
Ok, bye.
Dad will you driv me to the cake factory with my dow in the back of
your truk? okYdokY. OK! Vrvrvrvrvrvrvrvrvrvrv. Wear here. Halp me
carry my dow in. ok oh it is so big aaaaaa its heavy. Put it in the
humudis ofin. Its in the ofin and baking! Fffmmm smells good. Its
making my tug thirsty.
Its done. It started to grow and grow and grow and grow and soon it
was biger than the factory OHNO! Ah, can I tell you a secret? WAT!
We are going to have a party with the hole city and WE CAN BING THE
CAKE. YES!
And they did. THE END.
*illustrative note: a page full of stick-people on a giant cake*
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Haunted House
by BMC, age 5
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A long long time ago there was a haunted house. In the haunted house
was Dracula, a skeleton, a vampire, a mummy, thirteen bats, three
ghosts, creepy-crawly things, trap doors, witches and warlocks, spiders,
and Elephant Man. In the backyard there were tombstones. When it was
nighttime all the werewolves (including wolfman) howled by the light of
the moon. When it's morning the werewolves sing a song. The End.
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The Leeches
by Jobe, age 16
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The child was borne of the Lord's creation, a being which could be
formed out of his very own growth and experience, a spirit to feed with
unbridled knowledge.
It was all so new and awe-inspiring to the youngster, leaving him
quite vulnerable at the outset. He was not adept at finding his
direction, but there would be plenty of time for that, he was told.
And he used his time wisely, accepting the views and counsel of those
around him in hopes of enhancing his situation.
But then, out of the shroud enveloping him -- permitting no escape for
he had too little strength to warrant it -- the leeches emerged.
There were two of them, a male and his mate, trying to devour this
being so full of life. His blood was of no interest to them, yet his
spirit they craved. They nurtured him at first, creating a false sense
of security. Then they struck slyly, subtly, without his awareness.
The child was no longer in command of his life and was being wrapped up
ever tightly, growing more dependent. And the leeches, the leeches
were getting positively uncompromising, acting as if they were Him,
molding the child out of their vision, sucking him into their domain,
showing blatant disregard for his freedom, unaware of the impact their
actions would have. They were merely attempting to provide more
comfort for their own lives.
They felt since they had conceived his world that they were entitled to
transform him. The child tried desperately to resist, but the struggle
was an arduous one. They continued to feed on him voraciously,
indulging their gluttony, subduing him in the meantime and cutting him
off from his own world.
While the child seemed to be developing normally, it became
increasingly clear that the child was losing his will, his
self-assurance. His soul, every fibre of his being, was stripped bare,
leaving him brittle and fragile. He wanted to scream out, "You're
hurting me. Let me go." But he was frozen.
Slurping the last few morsels they could squeeze from within him, the
leeches eased their grips, and as quickly as they came, they left,
leaving the child to pick up the pieces on his own and start over
again.
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The Tunnel
by BMC, age 5
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One day a man was rowing his canoe down the river and his canoe sank into
a beaver lodge and there was a spooky tunnel in the beaver lodge. He
wanted to explore the tunnel. As soon as he got into the middle of the
tunnel rocks began to tumble down and lava start rushing behind him and
Indians started throwing their spears at him. Eagles started jumping
down through the top of the tunnel and scratching at him. He died. The
End.
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The Old Farmyard
by Heckat, age 6
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It was getting later than usuol. Mom would begin to worry. The sun was
beginning to go down. As I pased by the old deserted farmyard.
Suddenly I saw a ghost coming out of the window, the door began to creek
I ran as fast as I could all the way home. I said "What if they
followed me." But they didn't boy am I ever glad. But as I got into
bed I thot I saw a ghost in the windowsill, I thot I herd a creek in the
closet and a gron on the floor. I couldent sleep. In the morning I was
tird. A sun beem throo the window shining on my fase. I said in a
sleepy voice "I'm never going by that old barnyard again."
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Adventure: A Non-True Story
by trilobyte, age 8
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"Your teacher will never believe an excuse like that," said Joan.
"You mean that I was riding my bike home and some hijackers from Israel
came and wanted the answers to the exam so they hijacked me and took
the answers?" questioned Jason.
Joan shrugged. "No," she exclaimed, "of course not. Here's a better
one: Yesterday night I went out canoeing --"
"But I don't have a canoe," Jason interrupted.
"So? 'Teach' doesn't know that!" Joan said. Joan went on. "As I was
saying, yesterday night I went on a canoe ride... on the river --"
"What river? There is no river in this city!" Jason exclaimed.
"SHUT UP!!!!!" screamed Joan. "Stop interrupting!" said Joan a little
calmer. "On with the story. Yesterday night I went on a canoe ride
on the river. While I was sitting on the canoe when some crocks came
up and my food supply was all gobbled up with thanks to the crocks!
Later I got further down the river. A hurricane!"
"In a river?" questioned Jason.
"I SAID SHUT UP!" very loudly screamed Joan. "The hurricane swept us
under the river."
"A hurricane in a river?"
"Yes," replied Joan.
"Hurricanes don't sweep you under, whirlpools do!" said Jason.
"I think a teacher doesn't know that kind of complicated stuff,"
replied Joan, not knowing what she said. "Back to the excuse. As
I was saying, a hurricane swept us under the river."
"How will I survive?" asked Jason.
"You'll see," said Joan. "I went and go the canoe. I couldn't hold
my breath any longer. I got up to the top. Finally I got breath.
Later I found my canoe. I went and got in it and used my
change-of-clothes. Fortunately those clothes weren't as wet as the
others. I went on and when I got farther I took out my fishing
pole, and started fishing for fish to eat. Luckily, I had a
mini-stove. I caught a whale of a fish."
"I caught a whale?" asked Jason.
"No, you caught a 5 foot 50 pound trout," replied Joan.
Jason said "Strange," while twisting his finger around his ear.
"Later I ate half of the fish. it was good to my stomach. I went
to get my MAD to read. Thank goodness it didn't get wet. It was
the first one they ever made. I enjoyed it. Later I got a '71
out. I enjoyed the satire 'On a clear day you can see a funny girl
singing hello dolly forever.'"
Later Joan and Jason got to school.
"Get down in circle right now!" said "Mr. Teach."
"I'm sorry," said Jason sympathetically, "my homework isn't done.
I was riding my bike on a canoe. Some hijackers from the river
came and made me read MAD. Then their 5 foot, 50 pound trout came
and pigged out with my food supply and --"
"Enough," said "Mr. Teach." "You've been talking to Joan, haven't
you?" asked "Mr. Teach."
"Yep," replied Jason.
"C'mon," said "Mr. Teach." "Enough. Sit down and listen to this
story called 'Adventure,' by [trilobyte]."
"Okay. You know, I feel like I know [trilobyte]," said Jason.
"Me too, me too."
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ice-cream
by AlterEcho, age 4
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i love ice-cream
the end
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The Red Box
by Gnarly Wayne, age 1
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There was a big red box that had arms and legs and an eye in the center
that never closed and vibrated. It was a good box and would battle
various other shapes. It was eventually beaten by a triangle. One
time, the box made a group of other shapes and they were all good guys.
But since there were no bad guys, some of the shapes decided to become
bad guys so that they would have something to do.
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Alex at Recess
by Melatonin, age 8
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While alex was walking he saw a nice shining preety place. Then he got
there. He did figer out that was the place he owes whoted to go to. He
was filley there. He took a good look aroud. He foued a tree. He sat
down and ate his peanut butter sawich. Then the bell rang. Ding dong
ring and the kids and alexander to he went in. Then all the kids saw
hem. He look back. Then everone started to say help a mouse. Then the
teacher komed down and the kids komed down. Then scooll was then ther
was som candy in hes pocket. He gobled it and he got a sorr somik and
he thogth to hemself I'm cwiting scooll.
[Illustration: a man in a brown hat, multicoloured children, a monkey.]
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