Monday, September 24, 2007

What Do You Do For A Living Allan?

The title of this post is the question I get asked all the time when go to political or social gatherings. I am a commodity/futures broker. I buy and sell commodity/futures contracts all day long for different clients all over the country. The best analogy I've ever come up with is to ask people if they've seen the famous 1983 comedy movie "Trading Places" with Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy. I don't actually work as a floor broker in the pit because you would have to live in Chicago or New York for that. I work out of my office here in Huntington Beach, California taking orders & placing trades for people. Here is a clip from the last few minutes of the movie for your enjoyment.

Does your neighborhood have a homeowners association? Did you know your HOA can take your home away from you? News 4 WOAI Trouble Shooter Brian Collister is investigating the case of one family who's being evicted by their HOA.

A disabled couple in a San Antonio neighborhood is losing their home. Why? It was sold by their homeowners association because they did not pay $380 in HOA dues.

"There's no way in hell... this association should do this," says Dan, the homeowner.

Hear from the HOA and see Brian Collister's full investigation, Tuesday night at 10pm on News 4 WOAI.

That was a sarcasm! In my writings, I never qualify my sarcastic remarks by any quotes. I leave that on a reader to figure out what is real and what is sarcasm. Qualified sarcasm is not sarcasm and such sarcastic statement would be intellectually meaningless.

However, I have noticed that Americans are unable to figure out sarcasm and do label a writer crazy... i.e. your prior coblogger Lee Lemke was a firs class American prone intellectual midget same lake Claudio from OJ is.

So let me qualify the above statement for you; I have intentionally used word "ON"... "Did you sold future contract on"... to make it look like if the mafia pouts the contract on a person. Got it? That was a joke build on the foregoing profession in which you are engaging.

So next time Allan, when you are reading something, from any writer, which appears incoherent to you, try to apply sarcastic interpretation to see if it makes any sense and then fill the rest with your fantasy.

Like old movies use to do; A couple start kissing and then camera moved and zoomed on the bedroom lamp, soft music start playing louder and it was up to your fantasy to figure out what they are doing.

So if you were stupid like Lee or Claudio you wold think that they are working on the election campaign.

Allan, there is somewhere embedded a sarcasm in the above statement so try to figure it out.