This is my first Tuesday night at South Park. I’ll be staying up all night helping our crew work on Episode 1302, “The Coon.” I could not be more excited. It was not long ago that I would pull all-nighters studying for microeconomics exams. Now I’m getting paid overtime to stay up all night and work on an episode of South Park. Who’s laughing now, Professor Herrera?

However, when I explain my job to outsiders (mainly my buddies who make 70 K + a year working for failing investment banks) they laugh at me. They call me a “coffee bitch.” The truth is, they are correct. I am a coffee bitch; but at least I work for a viable TV show. Thanks to the insolvency of the very companies that pay inexperienced frat bros 70 K + a year to play with Excel all day long, our economy is ruined. People are depressed. They need a distraction from their miserable lives. They need South Park.

The coffee I brew every morning, as seemingly trivial as it might be to outsiders, does help bring South Park to the public. Furthermore, bleak economic forecasting suggests a continuing demand for South Park. Therefore, unless I mess up the coffee (or the toner…again,) I have some degree of job security. Whereas my banker buddies are likely to be unemployed shortly when their crappy employers downsize again.

I'm surprised working at South Park isn't listed as one of, if not, the best job in America. They'll have Virtual Reality simulators in the 2060's so people like me will experience the strung-out, coffee-ridden magic.

This is my first Tuesday night at South Park. I’ll be staying up all night helping our crew work on Episode 1302, “The Coon.” I could not be more excited. It was not long ago that I would pull all-nighters studying for microeconomics exams. Now I’m getting paid overtime to stay up all night and work on an episode of South Park. Who’s laughing now, Professor Herrera?

However, when I explain my job to outsiders (mainly my buddies who make 70 K + a year working for failing investment banks) they laugh at me. They call me a “coffee bitch.” The truth is, they are correct. I am a coffee bitch; but at least I work for a viable TV show. Thanks to the insolvency of the very companies that pay inexperienced frat bros 70 K + a year to play with Excel all day long, our economy is ruined. People are depressed. They need a distraction from their miserable lives. They need South Park.

The coffee I brew every morning, as seemingly trivial as it might be to outsiders, does help bring South Park to the public. Furthermore, bleak economic forecasting suggests a continuing demand for South Park. Therefore, unless I mess up the coffee (or the toner…again,) I have some degree of job security. Whereas my banker buddies are likely to be unemployed shortly when their crappy employers downsize again.