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Friday, 4 February 2011

Size Matters!

Have revisited this post today, I am now 46 and had a tummy tuck last year. I am extremely happy with my body now, best decision I ever made. Am definitely getting more comfortable in my own skin, just the face to work on next :)

Size matters…………

I was brought up being occupied and *kept off the streets* with dancing, swimming and gymnastics amongst other things. I swam every morning before school and was woken – I kid you not - with a mars bar “for energy” – those of you who know me now know I cannot touch chocolate. I was therefore quite fit, but grew up in a house with a violent dictatorial father, and I’m afraid I became the stereotypical eating disorder bird! I survived for months on 1 apple a day, because I figured that was healthy, and weighed myself at least 20 times a day. It became my *friend* which I believe is the in vogue way of describing it, but hey it was before the internet thank God, so was my own private hell. I then got to the point that I couldn’t sustain it and as I said to my 3rd councillor “I failed and became bulimic”. Needless to say I had weight issues. You may have heard me talk about my ex husband, but to be fair to him the night of our wedding in Las Vegas I was throwing up the “wedding breakfast” trying not to get my veil dirty! Whilst those issues are very much behind me, if I have strength I’ll blog on the turning point, I still have problems with myself and self loathing and image.

Whilst I respect choice, I despair at ladies paying to be weighed every week, particularly when they are seeking out diet cake! At the same time however I realise these ladies are normal and I am not! I just wanted to explain that I can appreciate the ever striving. and I’m behind you if that’s your thing, but I am unable to contribute! I am 44(age) and a size I’m comfortable with myself, in areas, but still a bit ish! Tho starting to realise that we are all a bit ish!

What am I trying to say, hmmmm, I cant do weight stuff over there on twitter, though the beauty of twitter is you get to be who you want to be, so go for it but I won’t contribute anytime soon 

8 comments:

Great start to a blog, just picking up what you said then, wonder if twitter had been around, someone to talk to etc when you were growing up , things would have been different? I also have to confess to being someone that pays £5 every week to be weighed:-(Look forward to next part of your story x