More tenuous Liverpool transfer rumours? It can only be international break!

No disrespect intended to Stockport, Wrexham, Eastleigh Town or Staines but this tiresome international break has again left us bereft of top quality football. We’ve got Brazil vs Iraq tonight night and then the main event. Wait for it. England vs San Marino. How many times must we hear the term ‘David vs Goliath’ and ‘England can’t win even if they win’ over the next few days, in a tame attempt to add drama to the most forgettable and flimsy of football occasions?

I dare say that punters will be lucky to get change from £100 from Wembley once all is said and done on the night. In times of recession, is it really worth the money? Indeed, is it worth a tenth of the money? Somehow the match is sold out. We must then assume that each cheer for England will mainly comprise the voices of heavily discounted youngsters.

Can’t we just get some computer simulator to play out the game virtually and save everyone the money, time and hassle? Or just call it a 2-0 without playing? England won’t need goal difference to go through this group. San Marino aren’t going through anyway. So why not save the minnows the sort of embarassment usually reserved for the parents of horribly out of tune X Factor contestants and call it 2-0? God did I really just reference that sham of a TV show? You see what the international break does to me? I’ve got some idiot on the radio singing about eating bananas, I’m thinking about X-factor and it’s the international break. I have a seriously bad mood coming on.

The only thing that is going to get me through this god awful period is a small flutter with Billy Hilliam. I’m going to splurge a squid on an accumulator and hope that it will go some way to filling the vacuum created (can you create a vacuum? It’s another discussion altogether) by this sorry state of affairs, aka, the international qualifiers.

Click this link or a William Hill banner on this page, sign up and join in. It’s recession busting fun and you could make the sort of king’s ransom that would allow you to gleefully shimmy off to some sun battered island to slurp cocktails, instead of sitting around like a numpty because of the international break, reading ridiculous football rumours about how some guy’s dog ate the Liverpool chairman’s exotic bird but before it did, the parrot just had time to sqawk

‘Zaha to Liverpool. Zaha to Liverpool. 5 year deal worth in the region of £12m.’

Oh and it’s around 100 times cheaper than going to Wembley to see England play against a country that doesn’t own any footballs so they have to practice with air. And we think we have problems in deciding whether the ball has crossed the line…….

Here’s our pick of the week’s games. Good luck!

Brazil v Iraq HOME WIN

Macedonia v Croatia AWAY WIN

Serbia v Belgium AWAY WIN

Czech Rep. v Malta HOME WIN

Armenia v Italy AWAY WIN

Faroe Islands v Sweden AWAY WIN

Kazakhstan v Austria AWAY WIN

Netherlands v Andorra HOME WIN

Slovenia v Cyprus HOME WIN

Slovakia v Latvia HOME WIN

England v San Marino HOME WIN

Finland v Georgia HOME WIN

Belarus v Spain AWAY WIN

France v Japan HOME WIN

A £1 accumulator bet with William Hill on the above outcomes will win you £91.60