"Bruce Willis, You Can Fight Anything ...but YOURSELF!"

Is it just me, or has the action genre been a little weird this past decade or so? Maybe it has to do with the rise of CGI in feature length films, or maybe it's just as simple as a change in the aesthetics movie-goers look for when they see a film, but action lately movies have lacked punch. They feel the need to over explain, to drive exposition into the ground, dragging down the pace of the movie at the same time. Even Transformers, one of the highest grossing action movies ever, is bogged down by tedious dialogue-driven scenes; the movie doesn't get going until it's nearly over.

It's not that Looper doesn't do this, but that it threads its exposition and "character driven" scenes pretty well together with the guns and blood. It delivers its plot to the audience at breakneck speed, and only gives you just enough downtime to catch up with it...mostly.

I guess what I'm saying is what makes it a successful movie, and makes our drinking game successful as well, is Bruce Willis and Young Bruce Willis (I mean, Joseph Gordon-Levitt). What bogs it down is...everything else.

"Is There a Drink for, like, Totally Obnoxious?"

We've covered a fair amount of movie musicals here on For Your Inebriation, and there's a reason for that. In the mid-2000's, the genre went through a bit of a renaissance. Due to the success of movies such as Moulin Rouge and Chicago, the industry suddenly realized that there was still a market for a big, flashy, highly-choreographed movie where we get to see our favorite movie stars sing (or try to). So dozens of musicals on Broadway were adapted to the big screen, with honestly mixed results. For every Chicago, there was a Rent.

One of the more successful adaptations was the movie we're drinking to this week: Hairspray. Based on a musical which was based off a movie, it's a beautiful example of the fun, pop schlock that came out around that time. Its bright colors, catchy songs, and inspirational quotes left teenagers and adults alike dancing in the aisles. Also, this movie brought us John Travolta in drag, and that is just the gift that keeps on giving.

But is there any substance under all this style? Did this movie deserve to be the smash hit it was? Welcome to the 60's. It's time to get your drink on.

Lascivious Lesbians? Lovely!

I'm a relative newbie to this show, and I know VERY few people who watched it while it was airing. The entire six season series is on Netflix, sort of a curious example of mid-2000's television. A show about a group of lesbians living it up in Los Angeles. Like it? Love it? Loathe it? The choice is yours. It definitely earns its name as a trailblazing series. I'm not sure if we've ever seen so many gay women on television since. But is it any good?

To tell the truth? It's a soap opera.

There is little to distinguish this show from any soap opera except that all of the protagonists are female, and most of them are gay. Otherwise, the main ingredients are there: a constantly shifting cast, overlapping sexual liasions, nudity, LOTS of hurt feelings and betrayal. There's even a murder later on in the show (don't ask me, I didn't watch that far).

The real question concerning this show is how progressive can it be when it follows the same basic formula of every daytime television drama ever made? Let's dive into the lucsciously laconic lives of the ladies on "The L Word".

"I Feel Like Louise Bourgeois is Orgasming Somewhere."

Well, it's November. Halloween has come and gone, but the memories and the hangovers still remain. Maybe you stuffed your face with candy, or maybe you drowned your sorrows in liquor. Or maybe you didn't do a thing because Halloween was on a Thursday this year and dammit, you had work in the morning. What, does everyone expect you to forsake your good health for some cheap thrills and a costume contest or two? You're a busy guy.

Not to worry, friend, because that's what holiday weekends are for (or any weekend, really). And there are few better ways to celebrate Halloween than by watching The Nightmare Before Christmas. A beautiful labor of love, this stop-motion classic was beloved by many creepy children who grew up in the 90's. With its catchy songs, its breathtaking animation and its unique take on Halloween AND Christmas, it earns its title as a holiday staple.

Perhaps you don't know what I'm talking about. Maybe you've never seen this movie, but wondered what the fuss was about. If you haven't, it's about time you've begun.