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Finally, here it is ! As promised, I present you the Bonus Chapter of Free Fall : Renaissance, which celebrates the two years anniversary of the first publication of my fanfiction, in March 2014 🙂 I made you wait since I announced it to you guys, but it’s because I had to finish the translation of the english version 😉 I hope you will like it, this is a softer and sexier chapter, far from the previous torments ! Don’t hesitate to tell me what you think about it. This will be my last writing about Free Fall, I mostly created this chapter to please my friend Alex. I also recorded a short video to thank you all for your support during those two years and explain you how this bonus chapter was born. I advise you to watch it first 😉 Have a good read !

Free Fall : Renaissance – Bonus Chapter

The smell of coffee wakes me up. I open my eyes. I look at the window. It’s still dark outside but the sun is starting to rise. I look at my right and discover Kay with a cup of coffee in the hand.

– Hello you, he says.

– Hello honey.

Several months have passed since Kay and I have reunited. I’m juggling with my life as a Task member, my life with Max and my life with Kay, which is really becoming difficult and exhausting, not including the barracks apartment which is becoming too small for both of us.

Kay sits down next to me. I look at him right in the eyes. He is so beautiful. I’ve lived through darkness and hell for months after I messed up with Bettina. And now, I can just savor the present moment and enjoy Kay’s face, with no fear of losing him again. And I must say I like that.

– Come closer, I whisper.

Without any other word I kiss him, devouring his lips and tasting his tongue. My hands softly touch his back. We stay like this several good minutes to hug each other. I want to go further than just a simple hug, and start to slip my hand on his belly beneath his t-shirt. But I suddenly feel him grasping my hand and put it away.

He gets a little closer to me, and I feel his crotch stick against me, which causes me a rise of delight.

– Guess what, the other day, when I went running several ten kilometers from here, in the hills, I discovered a very charming place, he explains. I would like to bring you there and spend the night with you. Especially as the weather should warm up with sun in the afternoon.

– You mean, camping ?

– Absolutely, he answers me with a large smile.

– I’m not against it, but your forget Max …

Usually, Kay is taking care of Max when I’m not there, because he hasn’t started a new job yet.

– I’ve already planned everything, tells me Kay with a comforting tone. I called Lena and she accepts to keep Max during our getaway. I just have to call her again to confirm our trip.

– Well, that’s ok, I say.

– Perfect ! he exclaims while dropping a kiss on my cheek. We will leave at the beginning of the afternoon.

No sooner said than done. Kay warns Lena. As for me I go wash myself and reunite some clothes for this mysterious getaway. Kay deals with preparing a large bag where he puts together camping stuff and provisions.

When we are about to leave, Lena arrives, and we let her with Max to take the car. When we put our bags in the trunk, I discover in it a folding tent ready to be used in its case, which I never saw before. Obviously Kay had planed his deal for a while. He then takes the wheel.

We drive for about an hour, leaving the town, and getting deeper and deeper into the countryside until we arrive in a forest and rolling region in the North. We park in a place where a path leading to the woods begins. We get out, take our bags in the trunk and let the car behind us to take the pathway.

After a few moments, I observe Kay starting little strides. When he realizes I don’t follow him, he turns back in my direction while keeping bouncing in the other way.

– What’s going on, lazy ? Did you forget how to run, like in good old time ? Pussy !

He makes me laugh, and I indeed think back to this sport which immediately brought the two of us closer at the time we met. If we hadn’t run together, our story probably would have never started.

I warm up briefly then start to follow him by executing quick little strides, until I run at the same pace as him. I don’t run anymore as I used to since a while now, and it’s difficult for me to stick to his rhythm, even if after several minutes, my past forces are coming back.

After a moment, we stop running, and we simply walk to enjoy the time spent together. We meander like this through the forest during at least a few good hours, under a blazing sun, having a break every thirty minutes to rehydrate ourselves. Fortunately, the trees give us a more than welcome shadow. Gradually, things get complicated, as the ground raises and we have to climb a large steep hill.

At the beginning of the evening, we finally reach the wooded top of this high hill. After some steps, we penetrate in a clearing. I am then amazed by the sight I discover. A small lake stands in front of us, and behind, we can see the infinity of the landscape and plains further down from our very high view point. No city on the horizon, just the wild nature. I take a deep breath at the air which starts to cool down and admire this stunning view for long seconds.

– So, what do you think about it ? Kay asks me, placing himself behind me and wrapping his arms around my belly.

– Kay, this is just … magnificent. You were right to convince to come here.

I turn towards him to kiss him. Then we start to pitch the tent. While Kay finishes to set up the pegs, I busy myself to gather some wood to build a fire. Luckily, no one else appears. It seems like we’ll have this clearing just for us, and I’m looking forward to it.

By the time everything is finally set in place, the night has fallen, and the glow of the stars begins to shine in the cloudless sky. The round circle of the moon also makes his appearance. I didn’t think the moon would be full tonight.

While I’m putting my hand in the water of the lake to appreciate its freshness, I suddenly feel Kay abruptly grasping me from behind to lift me up. He has taken off his top, and I feel my hormones cavorting at the sight of his naked torso. Without warning, he fiercely kisses me. Surprised, I respond anyway to his invitation. I savor our kiss. I have the sensation to be caught in an inextricable whirl.

– Would you like to bathe ? Kay asks me.

– Are you kidding me ? It must be cold !

Without notice, he pushes me in the water. I immediately feel the freshness of the liquid firming up my skin and my muscles. My clothes are completely soaked.

– You’ll pay for this ! I shout at him.

– Oh yeah ? he answers me with with an air of defiance.

When my turn comes, I throw myself onto his legs and attract him in the water bluntly. He splashes my head and I immediately respond. We play liked kids during five good minutes, until Kay silently approaches me. This time, I initiate action, and I kiss him tenderly. I suddenly feel his hands removing my wet t-shirt, and a few movements later, we both end up naked. I hope no one will appear of nowhere in the clearing, but I must admit this is spicing up my growing excitement.

I feel Kay’s hardening member against mine, and I don’t need much to attract him even closer to me. I kiss his cheeks, his neck, then I nibble his ear. It seems he’s no longer answerable for anything. In return, he kisses every inch of my face and my neck, and nothing is left for chance in his gestures. He grasps my member back and forth, which leaves me at the edge of ecstasy for several seconds before coming back to my lips.

It is hard for me to describe how much I am happy to be there with Kay, to enjoy this pure moment of happiness by his side. Only the two of us. Only illuminated by the rays of the full moon, with this magnificent plunging view over the surrounding plains below. Our hug lasts several more minutes, until we decide to get out of the lake to reach the tent where we will be in the warm.

As soon as we are in the open air, butt-naked, we end up freezing. We run towards the tent, and I grab two towels. I cover Kay with one.

– I’ll start the fire, he says to me.

I put a large plaid on the ground, and observe him doing his task. He is so sexy, with his wet hair. When the first flames start to lick the twigs then the wood pieces, he sits down next to me.

– You know, I start, while you were gathering wood earlier, I was thinking … it would be good if we could run away …

– What do you mean by run away ? he asks me while taking me in his arms and attracting my head to his torso.

– Remember, one time, while we were discussing on your balcony, when our affair was still secret, you proposed me to flee with you. The barracks, it has become too small for us three. This is no longer possible. I would like to move. What do you say about it ?

– I say this is a very good idea. You know, I still have my apartment in Düsseldorf.

He drops a kiss off on my neck.

– Düsseldorf ? That’s far.

– You decide.

But before I can answer anything, he let me fall on the plaid and come place himself above me. We stare at each other in the eyes for a moment, then I move my face closer to his, I daintily kiss his lips then his torso. I also feel him kiss my hair, chew my ear. His hands slide along my stomach then grab my sex. I let him do, powerless. Exquisite sensations seize my whole body. Then Kay turns me on the side and places himself behind me. I don’t have control anymore, Kay guides every single of my movements, every single of my gestures, and even every single of my emotions. I totally give myself over to him.

I feel him penetrate me, and waves of my intense pleasure bang together everywhere inside of me. I grasp his hand that I stick against my torso while his moves back and forth. The heat of the growing fire warms up our naked skins. His body against mine. His soul linked with mine. Both of us. Only the both of us. Two souls formerly lost, which found each other, were separated, and are now back together for good. Kay’s breath becomes quicker and deeper as a thin layer of sweat appears on our flesh in ecstasy. Our movements are perfectly rhythmic and our gestures synchronized, as if we were one single entity.

Then suddenly Kay’s hand hangs onto my member with vigorous action. My body can’t hold it any longer, and I feel the pleasure quickly rising in me. After an escalation of indescribable sensations, I turn my head in Kay’s direction to kiss him, and we both reach a burning orgasm at the same time.

We let our inert and exhausted bodies fall on the ground, and Kay curls up in my arms.

– It was … awesome, I murmur to his ear, leaving a kiss on his forehead.

– You bet !

We stay there, both stretched out, without saying anything during what seems to be an hour. This let me the time to think about Kay’s proposal, after our conversation earlier. After a while, I decide to speak. I put my hand on his head and fondle his golden and silky hair.

– Kay, I’ve cogitated about our conversation. I … I think you’re right. I accept your offer. Leaving to Düsseldorf seems to me like a good idea.

Kay lifts up a little and stares at me for several seconds.

– Marc, that’s super. We can leave whenever you want ! But what about your job ?

– I can ask for a transfer. I don’t think Werner Brandt will see any inconvenience. He knows in what kind of situation I find myself.

– I hope you’re right, he says.

I tell myself that this decision to go away will be beneficial for all of us. Not only will it allow to leave all the harmful events that occurred behind us, but also to have more space and take a fresh start.

Finally, as the night is not too cold, we decide to sleep under the stars near the burning fire. We take the air mattress and the sheets out of the tent, and install them on the plaid.

We slip under the covers, and Kay curls up again against my torso. We gaze at the infinity of the stars in the sky.

– You know what my dream is lately ? Kay questions me pensively.

– No. Tell me my love.

– One day, I would like us to go live abroad, leave Germany, and why not start a family together, have a child born from our shared love …

At first, I don’t know what to say, but I love Kay so much and he brings me such hope that I would be ready to follow him anywhere right now.

– Kay, I promise you that one day, we will realize this dream.

We end up falling asleep under the glow of the full moon, lulled by the clinking of the waves from the lake, our two bodies against each other, enjoying the present moment like two souls reunited and bound for eternity.

Chapter’s Song (Lake Scene)

Final Song of Free Fall : Renaissance

P.S. : This final song is a wink to Max Riemelt. This the final song of the excellent series Sense8 where he plays the character Wolfgang.

The day is magnificent, shiny. One year has passed since Kay and I have moved to France, near the German border. Our life is quiet, peaceful.

We are seated on the grass, Kay lying down against me, his head resting on my shoulder. My arms embrace tenderly his chest. We are looking into the distance at Max having fun in our large garden. He is accompanied by his little sister, Malia, two years old, whom Kay is the biological father. She is running joyfully around Max. Matthias, Steffi, Lukas and Lena, who remained close friends, have joined us for the weekend. They are sipping a soda on the patio.

A lot of things have changed this last five years. I have left my job for something more relaxed, and Kay and I have married. We have decided to raise a child together thanks to a surrogate mother in order to start a real family.

Bettina and I have remained on good terms. She has rebuild her life with another man and from their union was born a second son. Even if she has officially left me the custody of Max, she still cares a lot for him and she keeps him during holidays and some weekends.

I often think again about my meeting with Kay, which has radically turned upside down my entire life. I thought at this time my destiny was preordained : my job, Bettina, a child. But sometimes life is full of unexpected surprises, like Kay. An angel who arrives and carries you away, for the best and the worst. As the worst is behind us since a long time ago, we are now enjoying the best.

I caress Kay’s golden hair. He turns his head toward me, smiles at me and kisses me tenderly. I am delighted to be able to contemplate at leisure his beautiful blue eyes and his rebel smile. Those that made me have a crush for him at first sight. Those that made me fall in love. Love then took a whole new dimension for me.

Yes, because if there is one thing I have learnt and I have retained thanks to Kay, it’s that love is much stronger than all the denominations we can willingly give to it.

Final Song

Once again a big thanks to all of you for having followed Free Fall : Renaissance 🙂 This epilogue is a little complementary bonus which allows to imagine what Marc and Kay are becoming and what’s going on for them in a « normal » life, without all the mess they had to go through.

In order to celebrate the end of Free Fall : Renaissance’s publication, I would like to organize something. I saw that some of you were often asking me questions about the characters, the story, the writing, etc. So, I invite all those who are interested to ask your questions in the commentaries of the article below. I then plan to make a video where I will pick up the best questions in order to answer you directly so that we can exchange about Free Fall 🙂 You can ask me what you want, wether it is about the movie itself, my fiction or more personal questions. It’s up to you !

Here we go, Free Fall : Renaissance comes to its end. A formidable adventure started the 11th Mars 2014, almost one year ago, date when I officially published the first chapter of my fiction directly taking place after the movie. You were many to wait for the conclusion of this story, me in the first place. I know it has been very long, because I have sometimes lacked of time, and also of motivation to write, so I sincerely want to thank all the people who have continued to follow the publication of the chapters and who sent me numerous support messages. I didn’t imagine one year ago that this fiction without pretension would obtain such a success. As I announced you previously, I’m thinking of releasing the fiction in the form of an e-book. I will keep you updated about the evolution of this project, because I will have more time to spend regarding this question now that Free Fall : Renaissance is terminated. Once again a big thanks to all of you and good reading !! P.S. : stay connected next Saturday, one last little surprise awaits you.

Chapter 10

It has only been two days since I have left Kay in Düsseldorf, however I only desire one thing : to see him again. If it were up to me, I would take my Golf and join him in order to stay with him forever. Unfortunately, even if I am immersed in an infinite happiness because I have finally managed to find him again, I can’t forget my life here, my job and most importantly Max.

At work, colleagues compliment me, because they must see that my silence and my sadness from previous months have turned in a joy and happiness that nothing could stop. As a teenager living his first romance, I am continuously bound over my cell phone, watching out for any text message from Kay. This is our only way to communicate besides phone calls until we can see each other again.

– Hey, you are always stuck on your phone, is kidding Matthias while we are sat in the van on our way to a mission. Don’t forget your job. This event in town centre risks to degenerate, it’s not the moment to lose focus.

– You’re right, but I’m so excited since I’ve found Kay, you cannot imagine.

– I am the first to be delighted, says Matthias, but be careful not to be caught by Brandt. Especially since you have been absent several times lately. You walk on a tightrope.

The event takes place in calm and we patrol for the rest of the day in order to handle civilians’ safety.

When I come back in the evening, I discover with amazement Bettina in the living room, cradling Max. Lena is not here anymore.

– I have asked her to leave, announces calmly Bettina, as if nothing had happened.

– You’ve come back from Brazil ?

– Yes, yesterday.

– Why are you here ?

Bettina stands up and approaches me.

– Listen Marc. I would like to try to put the pieces back together. I know nothing will ever be the same, but while I was in Brazil, I’ve realized I also had my share of responsibility in this whole story. I have not tried to understand what you were getting through, because I was overwhelmed by anger and rage.

I am surprised by this speech.

– We have to think about the well-being of our son, she continues.

– I agree with you on this point, and you already know that.

– We will never be together again, but at least, we can try to make sure to protect him as best as we can. I’ve realized I had committed something horrible by leaving him.

– Why have you left ? I ask.

– I think I’ve made a total rejection following what happened. I’ve pretended like I could forget everything, but it’s not possible. Max is just as much your son that he is mine, so I thought you also had the right to raise him. And from what I was able to speak with this Lena, you have been a perfect father.

A moment of silence follows.

– I want to discuss with you, to understand, she says.

For the first time in many months, I finally feel Bettina is ready to listen to me, even if I blame her for having abandoned Max. Of course, I am also guilty in the first place to have cheated on her. We sit down on the couch, and for several hours, I tell her from every conceivable angle my feeling, but also everything that happened during her absence, including my search for Kay and our reunion.

– I can’t say I’m happy, she declares, because he is still the man who broke our couple, but if it allows you to go forward and feel better, then I am at least glad for you.

– Thank you Bettina.

As she has not seen Max since a long time, I propose her to keep him for a few days, which she accepts with pleasure. Because, as she said, Max needs her just as much as he needs me. This child was born from our union, and nothing can change that, whatever the actual situation is.

Now that Max is the hands of Bettina, I focus myself for the rest of the week on my job to go on again on good bases. I spend each evening in our previous house in order to visit Bettina and see Max. Our relation, though still tense, significantly improves. I finally have the feeling my life is regaining little by little a normal appearance, what I thought would have been impossible four months ago. I am satisfied to have hung on.

On Friday evening, I call Kay.

– Good evening, my love.

– Hello you. You’re still coming tomorrow, right ?

– Of course !

I take advantage of our conversation to tell him about the return of Bettina.

– You cannot imagine how much I’m impatient to take you in my arms, he announces me. This week without you has been the longest in my entire life.

– However, I have a bad news. I will only be able to make it in the middle of the night, I’m sorry. Brandt has stuck us with a god damn mission, and I can’t slip away from it. The good news is that we have our Monday, so I will still stay two days.

The next evening, I take the night train for Düsseldorf. I am so in a hurry that I don’t take time to change myself. I leave with my uniform on, my service weapon and my little luggage already prepared. The train reaches the railway station at 4.30am. I immediately head on foot to Kay’s apartment. When I arrive in front of the building, I ring the intercom. No answer. It worries me and I am blocked. I call Kay on his cell phone but no answer too. He must be sleeping, I think.

Luckily, a group of young partygoers slightly drunk, probably just coming back from a nightclub, appear and go inside the building. I take advantage of the situation to step into the breach behind them. When I arrive in front of the door of Kay’s studio, I discover with surprise that it is half-opened and the lock smashed, as if someone had kicked the door to open it by force. I immediately rush inside. The apartment is upside-down. There has been a struggle here, it is undeniable. Fear and anxiety immediately overwhelm me. What happened ? Where is Kay ? Then suddenly, I think again to what he had explained me last week : Gregor Limpinski had chased and harassed him during several weeks after his departure from the unit. It can only be him. I shout in rage.

I barely find Kay again that he is taken from me straight away. I try as hard as I can to keep calm and start to search the apartment seeking for evidences. It doesn’t take me long before I discover a sheet of paper placed on Kay’s bed. A word is written on it with a muddled writing : Rendezvous at the Rheinturm. If you call the cops, I kill Kay. It is the big tower which is used as a wave transmitter for television and radio around Düsseldorf.

There’s no name written, but I’m now almost sure it is Limpinski. The bastard ! I fall on the ground, powerless. I hesitate for a second to call the police, but I know well Gregor to have worked with him. He is not the type of guy to joke in this kind of circumstances and he is mentally unstable. I will have to handle it myself. I stand up. Finally, I’m glad to have brought my service weapon with me, because I don’t know what awaits me up there. All I hope is that Kay is alive and safe and that this asshole has not touched him. I don’t prefer to think something else could have happened to him. Above all, I ask myself how Gregor managed to reach the top of the tower with Kay without being caught. But if he got through, it means he has been devising his plan since long ago. He also knew I was coming today. It makes sense, I think for myself. He hopes to kill two birds with one stone. Kay thought he was safe, but Gregor, one way or another, found him. He is ready for anything to satisfy his desire for vengeance.

– You motherfucker, I whisper.

I verify my service gun, of a 9mm caliber, and hide it meticulously behind my pants. I take off my uniform jacket and steal one of Kay’s sweatshirts which I find in a wardrobe and put it on. I slip the sweatshirt over my pants in order to hide my weapon. I put the hood on my head. Without delay, I hit the road in the direction of the Rheinturm, taking care of being as discreet as possible. The time to reach the Rheinturm, it is around 5.30am. A board indicates that renovation works are taking place at the top of the tower for several days and that all activity is momentarily stopped. Limpinski has very well chosen his day indeed.

I find an access door at the bottom of the tower. The security lock is exploded. Gregor probably took that way. I sneak in without a noise, take off my hood and take the safety stairs two by two, avoiding the elevator to not be detected. I am exhausted when I arrive at the top, and stop for a few seconds in order to catch my breath. I’m afraid it is too late. That Kay is dead. I try to get rid of this macabre thought and penetrate in the room of the panoramic restaurant from the Rheinturm, but there is no sound. The place is plunged in darkness, only illuminated by city lights. No sign of life here. I inspect upper floors of the top of the tower but don’t find anything or anyone either. I come to the conclusion that Gregor and Kay must be in the last level linked to the antennae.

I carefully open the door, one hand behind my back, ready to grab my weapon. The room, smaller than inferior floors, is made of computing towers and filled with hard disks. Only the glows of the city come light up the place as well as the green, red and blue diodes from computers. I step prudently into this maze of servers similar to a labyrinth. No sound. And suddenly I hear his deep voice behind me.

– So you damn faggot, you dared to move your ass over here, congratulations.

My doubts are confirmed. I softly turn around and discover with terror Gregor Limpinski, a gun in the hand, directly aimed at me. Kay lies just next to him, on his knees, a bag of black fabric on the head and the hands attached behind his back. He wears a white t-shirt stained with blood.

– What have you done to him fucking pig ? I get enraged.

Limpinski glares at me then flaunts a crazed smile.

– You’ve come to meet up with your cursed lover ? What a good thing, you will be able to say goodbye to each other.

Gregor takes off the bag and I then discover the tumid face of Kay. His mouth is gagged, so that he can’t speak and call for help. I am horrified to see him like this. Much more than when I found him in this bar, half dead. I feel a light of hope in his moist eyes when he becomes aware of my presence. Anger immediately rises in me and I start moving toward Gregor, ready to finish this off.

– Tssss, stop, bad idea, he grumbles.

He points his gun at Kay’s temple. I halt straight away.

– Don’t do this, I beg you, I shout in desperation.

He shakes his weapon near Kay’s face. I see his body trembling and a tear flowing on his face.

– You and your boyfriend have ruined my career, do you know that ? I was about to be promoted. You have spoiled everything. If this faggot of Kay had not rolled up in the unit, none of this would have happened.

I softly raise my hands as a sign of submission and carefully step forward.

– It’s not too late Gregor, you can still re-enlist, I say, trying to temper the situation. We won’t say anything, I promise.

– I hope you’re kidding ? Do you seriously think that any unit would want me ? I’ve been struck off the list. Don’t attempt to create a diversion.

– Why are you doing this ? Do you really think it is worth it ?

– I don’t have anything left to lose. Even my fucking wife has left me. I’ve slapped that bitch. The only thing I have left is vengeance. I’m gonna shoot down the both of you.

An irascible fear suddenly strikes me. Lose Kay, lose life. No way.

– You will be hunted down, tracked, if you do this, I threaten in order to destabilize him.

– No risk, I’ve planned everything. I will cover up the crime. I already imagine the headlines : Two cursed lovers tear each other apart. Caught in madness, he kills his partner then suicides.

– You’re totally out of your mind. You will be uncovered.

– Enough talking, it is time to say farewell. One last word for Marc, Kay ?

Gregor removes his gag. Kay takes a deep breath. I see several tears starting to flow on his face. Kay begins to speak without even paying attention to Gregor, ignoring him :

– Marc, I love you so much, he pronounces with difficulty, probably petrified by fear and pain. Don’t try anything impossible for me, ok ? The most important, is that we were able to find each other again. If I had to die before, lonely, without you, I would have gone unhappy.

Kay marks a pause and gives a little cough.

– But I can die in peace knowing that we are together again. I should have anticipated that this peace of shit would rediscover me, he finishes to say while fixing Gregor with a despising gaze and an insolent smile.

Limpinski beats him in the back, probably irritated by this last sentence.

– Pathetic, spits Gregor. I shoot him down first, then this is your turn Borgmann.

Gregor pulls off the trigger guard.

– Stop, bastard ! I grumble.

– Your face is the last thing I take away, says Kay to me with a smile.

I see Limpinski’s finger getting closer to the trigger, powerless.

– No ! I yell while pulling out as fast as I can my weapon, taking advantage of this crucial moment of inattention from Gregor. I shoot a bullet in his direction. Lack of luck and because of panic, the bullet misses its target and embeds itself in a wall.

– You son of a bitch, shouts Gregor, pointing his gun on me.

I just have the time to throw myself aside when he shoots. I lose my weapon in the process. The bullet hits a window of the tower which smashes to pieces. I immediately pick myself up and don’t let him the time to act, rushing at him. I knock over him with all my strength, pushing him right into a wall where his back hurts itself with violence. His gun flies through the room and crashes on the ground.

He grabs me by the shoulders and chucks me aside. He is much more stronger than I am. While I get back on my feet, I realize he is heading to his weapon. I don’t let him the chance to reach his goal and throw myself onto him again. I administer him a punch in the middle of the face. His nose starts bleeding. He growls as an animal and fights back. I try as much as possible to protect myself from his assaults. He seems to be caught in a blind rage.

– I’m gonna burst you, damn loose ! he barks.

I attempt to throw him a new hit, but I realize we are dangerously getting closer from the smashed window. Void is threatening me just a few steps away. With a quick movement, I dash aside and try to knock my foot on Gregor’s leg in order to make him fall, in vain. I am down to my last ounce of strength, already exhausted by the ascension of the tower. Finally, he manages to pin me against a wall and violently grasps my neck with his two hands, starting to squeeze it to death. I attempt to rid myself from his grip, but can’t. Even my legs don’t seem to be able to move. I can’t breathe anymore. My sight becomes blurred. All is over. Shit !

– I suddenly hear Kay’s voice behind Gregor.

– Hey, fucker !

Gregor turns around, surprised. He releases my neck. I fall on the ground, half unconscious. It takes me a few seconds to discover Kay, on his feet. He has taken advantage of our struggle and Gregor’s inattention to pass his attached fists under his legs and to get back my weapon, which he holds with both hands, aimed at Gregor.

– You won’t dare to shoot, pussy, says Gregor with a disturbed laugh while I struggle to regain consciousness. You will let me go, but I will continue to hunt you down relentlessly. This isn’t over, trust me, he threatens.

Kay doesn’t let himself get flustered and firmly points the gun at Gregor.

– I’m not kidding.

– You will have my death on your conscience, Angel.

In a desperate attempt to get out, Gregor throws himself without warning on Kay, who immediately shoots the whole magazine, riddling him with bullets. Gregor falls on his knees, looking his multiple wounds from which blood starts flowing. Kay approaches him.

– Yes, I will have your death on my conscience scumbag, you’re right … but it relieves, concludes Kay.

Limpinski drops dead on the ground. Silence comes back in the room. It is over.

Kay collapses too, having reached his limits. I quickly join him and take him in my arms. I dry his face stained with blood with my hand.

– Kay, are you ok ? Answer me !

He smiles at me and caresses my face.

– You saved my life, I say to him while crying.

– It was my turn this time, he finds the courage to joke in a whisper.

I kiss him and help him to get back on his feet.

I ask him to grab my shoulder in order to facilitate him the walking. We approach the broken window in order to breathe some fresh air.

– He has arrived without warning, explains Kay. I was sleeping while waiting for you, and he has intruded into the apartment. I’ve tried to resist, but he has knocked me unconscious. I thought I was in a real nightmare when I saw him showing up. I thought I was rid of him. But most of all, I had the biggest fear of my whole life : never see you again.

I hold him in my arms to comfort him and let him spill tears of sorrow.

– I’m here now, and Gregor will never hurt anyone again. He had what he deserved. If it was not him, it would have been us who would be dead right now. You have done what was necessary. It was legitimate defense, we won’t be sued. We will explain everything to police.

I put my head against his.

– I thought you were dead Kay. When I arrived in your apartment. When I run to come here. I thought it would be too late.

– I knew you would come, Marc.

Kay raises his face next to mine.

– I love you.

– Me too, I answer him.

We stay stuck into each other arms, trying to forget the trauma we just got through.

– Starting from now, nothing will keep us away from each other. I promise you to stay by your side forever, Kay. No more separation. We move together, and we start a new life. We have suffered enough. Do you agree to follow me ?

– More than ever, Marc.

Our lips get closer, and we kiss each other endlessly while the sun rises, its first beams touching and warming our faces.

Our demons are now behind us. All that could have hindered our relation belongs to the past. Our love has overcome the difficult ordeals that stood on our way, from our meeting to this day. A new chapter awaits us now. And for the first time, I look Kay’s face illuminated by the sun with a new hope.

Hello my friends ! First of all I would like to wish all of you a very Merry Christmas 🙂 I hope you are spending a marvelous moment with your families and friends. Christmas usually means gifts ! And precisely, I have a beautiful gift to offer you : Chapter 9 of Free Fall : Renaissance 😀 It is really the Chapter I was waiting to be able to write, because it is finally the moment for the true « reunion » of Marc and Kay ! What is going to happen ? Read and discover ^^

Chapter 9

Kay and me leave the train station silently. My heart is racing. I still can’t realize he is finally here, for real, by my side. Not somewhere else. Not in an altered state of mind. Not unanimated. He gives me a little look sideways and smiles at me. I answer him by a hidden smile, almost embarrassed.

We walk for several minutes and got to the banks of the Rhine, where we take advantage of the sun to site on a bench facing the river. I was sure it would be necessary for us to speak, at least to explain things to each other, because Kay has probably suffered a lot. He will want to talk about it.

– I never thought I would see you again, Marc, he begins. I had scrapped you after I left. You were the only support I had in the Task and you abandoned me. I know it was not an easy situation for you. You were taken between Bettina, your son, your job, your obligations, and me. Maybe I have asked too much from you, he throws at me. But I was at least hoping to have a shoulder on which to rest a little. Yours.

I feel the weight of responsibility and fault falling on me. He is not wrong. I look at him straight in the eyes.

– Kay, I … it’s true, you’re right. I didn’t know how to get through. I’m gonna be honest with you : I decided to break off all contact because I thought what I was doing was a mistake. That you were just an affair. This is only when Bettina came back that I realized how much I was wrong.

I mark a pause and contemplate the river again. I feel Kay fixing his gaze upon me.

– Why did you come back, Marc ? he asks me.

– I understood it was not only that. That it was so much more. You opened something in me Kay. Something I didn’t know about. You freed the real Marc. My life was so dull, so morose, so monotonous and so uniform. The only thing that motivated me, was to know I was about to be a father. Then you appeared. You changed all that. With you I was feeling myself. But I didn’t handle the situation as I should have. I was incapable of assuming. I didn’t admit things. And finally I have tumbled in free fall. Kay, if only you could know how sorry I am. You were right, when we argued in your apartment. I have only been a careless selfish. I only thought about myself. And when I finally realized all of this, I wanted to come back to you, I went to your apartment, but your were not there. You were gone. Kay, I felt so alone, so lost without you. I realized I loved you. Yes, that I was deeply in love with you. And that I didn’t want to leave you anymore.

Tears reach my eyes again.

– Hey, Marc, says Kay softly to me while taking my hand. The fact that you’re saying me all of this, it’s already resolving a big part of things. Why didn’t you confess all of this to before ?

– I didn’t have the nerve to do it. It was impossible for me at that time.

Kay brushed my face with his fingers. It gives me shivers all around my body.

– I also have something to admit to you, he announces me. I want to apologize too. I asked you too much. In a way, I have also been selfish, because I wanted you only for myself. I didn’t consider the fact that you already had a family. I thought I could reap you from your wife and your son, and it was not fair. I was furious. Furious not to have you by my side every night. I almost screwed up your carrier, because if someone had learnt for the both of us, goodbye the police.

His speech makes a world of good to me, because I feel that an abscess is burst. He gets up from the bench.

– Come, I take you, let’s continue this discussion in my home. I want to be alone with you.

Twenty minutes later, we arrive in the new apartment of Kay, located in the town centre, in a beautiful area. He goes directly to the fridge and grabs two bears, which he uncaps. His apartment possesses a small balcony on which we head. It reminds me the good old time.

– Why did you leave ? I finally dare to ask.

– You forget you are the one who advised me to get away, he answers me with an accusing tone.

– It’s true but … I didn’t think what I was saying.

– Anyway, I didn’t have much choice. As soon as Gregor Limpinski and the others learnt for me, I was fucked up. Gregor has started harassing me. After the little party at your house, he has found me and beaten me up, as you have noticed the last time we have seen each other …

I suddenly feel a lot guilty. I don’t know what to answer. Kay does it for me.

– But it has not stopped there. I have learnt few days later by Britt that he had been fired. For having assaulted you. I had taken a room in a small seedy hotel outside of town. Someone had given him my phone number. First, he called me. He was threatening me, saying that everything was my fault, that if I had not joined the team none of this would have happened. He has clearly made it clear to me that he wanted me dead. He was totally disturbed, crazy. I have shut down my phone line.

This explains why I have not been able to call Kay when I came back in his apartment.

– And I don’t know how, one night, he has found my hotel. He was vociferating outside of my room, completely drunk. I acted like I was not there. The next morning, I have fled somewhere else, hoping he would leave me in peace. I was not really afraid, I was just wishing to forget everything, including you, because it was too hard. Anyhow, no one was able to help me. In this story, I was alone.

I can’t believe it.

– Kay, I am so sorry. I didn’t imagine that this had come to such disproportionate consequences. We had not heard of Gregor anymore after Werner Brandt fired him.

– This is not your fault. So after that, I have moved to a new city. The fact remains that he has, I don’t know how, managed to trace me back. He had the address of my new apartment, and I have been forced to flee in haste, once again. It seemed like he wouldn’t stop until he would be able to destroy me. He shifts all his miseries upon me. So I have decided to go away even further, here, in Düsseldorf. I have not heard of him since two months now, I’m finally free.

Without warning, I seize him and hold him tight in my arms, as to protect him. He plunges his face in my shoulder.

– Kay, I am there now. And I promise I won’t let anyone hurt you from now on.

I take the photograph where we are together out of my pocket and show it to him.

– I’ve been there, I say, in this studio. I didn’t even know you were drawing. I realize I was ignoring so many things about you.

– We ignored a lot of things about each other, he adds. Stuck in our hidden relationship, we didn’t really have the time and opportunity to get to know better each other. Now we will be able to make up for the lost time. Drawing allowed me to keep a fragment of you by my side. But it was just an illusion.

We continue to discuss about everything and nothing, to look back on the good moments of the past, while trying to avoid the bad ones. Then we realize that several hours have passed. It is almost 8pm.

– Come, announces Kay. I invite your for dinner. I’m starving.

– With pleasure.

We go out in an Italian restaurant from town centre. We spend most of the meal to observe each other with knowing glances, as if the last three months where we haven’t seen each other had disappeared from our memories. I feel an unreal joy invading me. All I have ever dreamt of since Kay has gone is happening. I finally find him again, and we laugh together.

After the diner, we head back to Kay’s place. The night has fallen. The atmosphere is calm, serene and relaxing. We go on the balcony to smoke a cigarette. The moon is full.

– Kay, you scared the hell out of me last week, I can’t prevent myself from saying. When I found you in this bar, I really thought you were dead. Why have you done such a thing ?

– I was desperate. I was feeling like my life had no more meaning, no more sense. I have gotten out as I usually did, and I have drunk. Too much. Mixed that with pills. I don’t know what the fuck I was doing. Thanks for saving my life by giving your blood. The entire week I have felt miserable. Pathetic. I have really hesitated to come find you at the railway station. I was ashamed by what you could be thinking.

Kay gets closer to me and nestles in my arms. I feel he needs affection. He who could sometimes seem so detached. I embrace him.

– It’s a fortunate thing that you found me, he continues. Think about it, how many chances was there that you discover me there, at this place ? I think it is fate that has reunited us. If two persons are meant to be together, eventually they find their way back.

– Do you really believe that ? I ask.

– Yes.

– So do I, I admit. When you were not there anymore, it is my faith in you that has helped me resisting against chaos.

I approach my lips near Kay’s and kiss him passionately. He answers my invitation, and I feel both our tongues joining together tastily. My hands go down along his body. I take off his t-shirt, and I feel he is doing the same thing with mine. Little by little, we go back inside the apartment while leaving the doors of the balcony wide opened. We throw ourselves on the bed and remove tenderly the rest of our clothes. No light is opened. Only the moonlight illuminates our naked bodies, stuck against each other. A little breeze fills in the room and the transparent curtains of the balcony’s doors float in the air. The place is plunged in a bluish, nocturnal atmosphere.

I hold Kay so tight against me, I contemplate his eyes and his magnificent body. I don’t want to release him. His soft hands are caressing my legs, my back, my chest and my face, propelling me in a kaleidoscope of unimaginable sensations. I also kiss Kay’s body. I savour every bite, every inch of his porcelain skin. I feel the excitement of my senses rocketing.

We start to make love in a delicate back and forth, full of tenderness. Kay grabs my hand. He gently deposits a delicious kiss over all my fingers. My mouth nibbles and titillates his chest, his nipples, his neck, his cheeks, and his ears. I can’t stop myself from breathing the exquisite perfume of his golden hair. Waves of intense pleasure go throughout our two bodies, both merging and melting into one another.

All notions of time have disappeared, as when we met up again at the train station, and I ignore how many minutes, even hours, lasts our delicious embrace, until we reach the point of no-return where we come together at the same time while kissing each other.

A few moments later, shut-away in our bubble of affection, where we feel like nothing can affect us, we fall asleep peacefully in each other’s arms.

We are awakened the next morning by the first beams of the sun, which come tickle our faces. I realize I am drowsed on Kay’s torso, my hands around his stomach.

– Hello you, he whispers while plunging his hands in my dishevelled hair.

I lift up, approach my face near his and kiss him.

– I feel like I’m waking up in Paradise, I say while smiling.

We stay in the bed lazing one more hour, enjoying the present moment. Then we finally decide to get out of the bed. We take a shower together, the occasion for us to spend a new complicit moment, and for me to admire the beauty of Kay. I massage and wash carefully every part of his body which seems fragile. I feel the deep need to protect him. I discover on his right arm the scar of the transfusion from last week. As to erase a bad memory, I pass my hand over it with some soap.

After having washed and prepared ourselves, we get out to have breakfast outside. We spend the rest of the Sunday in Cologne, near Düsseldorf, to walk, discuss, laugh, as if nothing had changed, as if it was like a first love, innocent and pure. We don’t give a damn about the look people may give on us. We visit the Dom, Cologne’s huge cathedral, and finish the day by going to the beautiful zoo of the city.

Then it is time to come back to Düsseldorf, and for me to go home. On our way back, we remain silent in Kay’s car, hand in hand, because we know that in less than one hour, we will no longer be together until next time. Back at the apartment, I pack my stuff and Kay escorts me to the train station. I feel sadness rising up in me. The kind of sadness that is gut-wrenching when you have to leave a person you care a lot about before a long journey.

– I don’t want to leave, I say silently.

Kay joins me and takes me in his arms. I put my head on his shoulder. I savour this last moment we have left before my departure.

– And me I wish so much that you stay. But you have to leave. Your son is waiting for you.

– I come back next weekend, promised.

– Marc, I have spent two formidable days by your side. I would have never imagined before last week that we would find back together. I had abandoned so much hope that I had forgotten the possibility that it could happen. For me it was just an illusion. I have not even tried to come back to you. Thank your for having had this courage, this strength, to find me. It means a lot to me, more than you can imagine. No one has ever done this for me.

I deposit a kiss on his lips, then get into the train which just arrived. I turn back..

– See you next week, I throw at him.

– Hurry up to come back, he answer with his malicious air.

Then the door closes. When the train starts to move, he shouts at me :

– Pussy !

I laugh and give him a finger. As I move away, I observe him through the window. Little by little, I see his silhouette growing shorter, until he disappears from my sight. I thought I would be terribly unhappy, but I surprise myself to smile, because I know I will see him again very soon. See you in one week, Kay.

Chapter 8, finally ! A chapter tremendously awaited by a lot of you because it marks the most important turning point in this fanfiction, the very reason why I created it in order to please myself and the others. To compensate a thing that frustrated us all : Free Fall’s ending ! I don’t say you more and I let you discover all of this. Just as a reminder, I still have 2 chapters to publish before it all ends 🙂 Have a good read and gros bisous ❤

Beautiful Fanart by Lupera-GER

Chapter 8

After several hours of driving, I come back home totally exhausted. It is about noon when I arrive. I find Lena and my son Max with a great pleasure. After these intense past days, I feel like I need some calm and most importantly some rest, and the fact to be with Max do me a world of good

– He has been very quiet, announces Lena, who is cooking a meal with a succulent smell.

I hold Max in my arms and he does a great smile to me.

– I’m starving !

– So sit down, says Lena while preparing plates.

I’m so hungry that I serve myself up twice. Then, down on my last ounce of strength, I head to my bedroom where I collapse on the bed. I sleep almost all the afternoon. Sunday comes to its end and Lena leaves the place. She will come back tomorrow to take care of Max.

The next morning, I get back to work with difficulty but I am happy to see Matthias again. During one mission outside of the barracks where we are together, I tell him about the last news and announce him that I have found back Kay.

– I am really happy for you buddy, he smiles at me while patting on my shoulder.

On Wednesday evening, we all go have a drink in a pub of the city. Lukas and Lena are also there. Max sleeps peacefully in his pushchair.

I go out have a smoke with Lukas and also inform him about my difficult reunion with Kay.

– I go back to Düsseldorf on Saturday. I hope he will be there.

– If he loves you and still cares for you, he will be, Lukas reassures me. You have still and all made that entire trip to find him while you did not even know where he had gone. He cannot ignore that. A few people would have done the same, Marc.

– I know. But this is also thanks to you and the others. You have all offered such an amazing support that I won’t ever know how to thank you all. You made me aware that I had to move myself.

– And it was worth it. I sincerely think that Kay will be there.

Despite Lukas optimistic words, I don’t receive any call from Kay during the week, which worries me a lot and casts doubt for a while on my will to go back to Düsseldorf. Did the nurse who took care of him hand over my paper ? Or is it maybe Kay who does not wish to hear about me anymore ? But a promise is a promise and I will go to Düsseldorf on Saturday morning.

The rest of the week passes at an incredible speed and I avoid asking myself too many questions. On Friday evening, I am not able to find sleep. The bay windows of my bedroom are wide opened and the curtains are floating in the air. I observe the stars in the cloudless sky, contemplative. I can’t stop to worry myself sick thinking about tomorrow. I’m afraid that Kay won’t be at the meeting. Maybe he hasn’t forgiven me to abandon him. To have been selfish. Maybe he has even someone new into his life. I banish all those negative thoughts from my head as best as I can while trying to be optimistic, but it remains difficult.

Finally, morning rises and now it is not possible to turn away anymore. My destiny is underway. Lena arrives around 7am to keep Max for the whole weekend, as I am not sure when I will be back. I finish packing a small suitcase where I’ve put the necessary things then head towards the living room to say goodbye to my son. When I’m about the leave, Lena joins me.

– Good luck, she whispers to me while kissing me on the forehead. I hope you will find what you’re waiting for.

– Thank you, I say, a bit stressed.

I finally take the car and drive to the train station where I take my train for Düsseldorf. The trip lasts a couple hours during which I stay totally impassive and silent. I think of nothing. I only feel a ball of anxiety intensifying little by little inside me, as the train gets closer to the final destination.

I arrive in the Düsseldorf train station around 11am. I scan the platform as the train slows down to finally stop. I grab my suitcase and get out of the railcar. I stay unmoving on the platform and look around. No Kay to be seen. I start to move forward to join the inside of the train station.

What can I do except waiting ? Maybe Kay has already come, already waited and has already left not seeing me arriving. It is true I was not even able to specify him when I was arriving as I did not have any mean to contact him directly. I should have perhaps taken a train before to arrive early enough. Something I had not thought about.

During long minutes, I stare at the travellers going back and forth. I feel like an intruder in this crowd in movement. Not being at my proper place. Little by little, the train station gets empty, very few trains landing on the platforms. The calm reappears. Being unable to stand still, I get up and start to pace up and down through the building.

I’m losing my time. Kay didn’t come, is not there, and won’t come. How to forgive an idiot such as me, despite all the possible efforts ? How to forgive someone who abandoned you at the moment where you needed support the most ? I ask myself how I would have reacted in Kay’s place.

Lost in my confusion, I don’t notice that I stand rooted alone like an imbecile right in the middle of the strain station. People around me must think I am crazy.

But suddenly, I hear a voice in the distance, behind me. It reaches my hears like an unhoped melody, one that I thought I would never hear again. I immediately recognize this typical, sarcastic tone :

– I didn’t think I would see you again one day.

I only need a fraction of second to recognize Kay’s voice. I turn around, stupefied, stunned, unable to believe it.

He stands there, in front of me, fifteen meters away from me. His face is magnificent, his look angelic, his air fragile. He has a much more beautiful appearance than the one from last week at the hospital.

No word is able to get out of my mouth. We look each other for several seconds. I feel like I face a mirage, or an illusion. But he is really there, I don’t dream, I’m sure of it. I’ve been waiting this moment for months. However I’m afraid of tempting anything. Is he furious ? Will he send me packing ? Whatever.

I let my suitcase fall on the floor. Tears start to trickle on my cheeks. I stagger slowly as a zombie towards him. He launches his usual little lopsided smile at me and begins to walk in my direction too. It puts my mind at rest in one go.

We literally throw in each other arms. This is only when I feel the contact of his skin that I’m sure I’m not dreaming. In this specific moment, nothing else matters. Time has frozen. I hold him as tight as possible, not wishing to let him go. His sweet fragrance reaches softly my nostrils. I don’t how many seconds, even minutes, we stay like this, embraced.

Then, finally, he whispers gently in my hear :

– You’ve come back.

I finally manage, with difficulty, to let escape fragments of words.

– Kay, I am so sorry.

He loosens from me, takes my face into his hands, and with his thumbs dry my tears.

– Let’s talk about this later.

Without warning, he throws an ardent kiss at me to which I succumb instantly, powerless. Several months ago, I would have sharply pushed him away, embarrassed, stuck in the constraint of decency, of the unsaid things, of shame. But today, I’ve changed, and I don’t give a shit of people around me or what they can think.

I answer Kay’s invitation by kissing him languorously. I feel like a part of the nightmare and my demons are dispelled, exorcised. I live a moment of pure happiness. One that I have not lived since a long time ago, except for Max’s birth. Life finally offers me an illuminated flower after having left me cloistered in dark room.

I press my forehead against Kay’s. I run my fingers across his golden hair.

– Thanks for coming, I murmur him tenderly.

– No, Marc. Thank you for finding me … and to have saved my life, he replies while sticking his face against my cheek.

It is as if we had never left each other. As if our past complicity was intact.

– Come, let’s go for a stroll, says Kay. We have a lot to talk about and to catch up.

Here comes Chapter 7 !! Since I’ve started my new job, I’ve got less time to write as when I come back in the evening I’m pretty tired, hard to find the motivation. But I am so wishing to finish my story that I will achieve it, I promise. I loved writing Chapter 7 cause there are a lot of passages I wanted to write since a while and I can finally set them down on paper. This is pretty emotional. I hope you will feel the same things as me when I created it. You will notice the apparition of a new character, Kuba, directly taken from the gay movie Floating Skycrapers : this is a little crossover I wanted to make because I liked this movie a lot. Have a good read ! And see you soon for Chapter 8 I hope 🙂

P.S. : I translated Chapter 7 as fast as I could so you can read it as soon as possible. So if native speakers see some weird sentences or expressions just tell me so I can correct them ^^

Chapter’s Song

Anger and despair invade me while the ambulance disappears. I slam my fists on the ground, of rage. I see my tears fall on the asphalt. Several seconds pass by during which time seems to have stopped. I do not even hear the sounds of the city anymore around me.

I am extracted from my confusion when I feel two warm hands grab my shoulders and help me to stand up. I don’t understand anything but I let myself go. The person holds me firmly and brings me apart, while the crowd who was observing me starts to scatter. I am placed on a bench. It is only at that instant I realize that a man aged around 30, pretty cute, with beautiful blue eyes and wearing a little mustache as well as a goatee is sat by my side and stares at me. He is the one who helped me get up.

– I saw what happened, are you ok ?

– Thank you, I am barely able to mumble.

– My name is Kuba.

I can’t even answer, just gulp. Surely the effects of alcohol mixed with the shock of having found Kay just to lose him straight away.

– Tell me, who was that guy ? Did you know him ?

– Long story.

– Follow me, I’ll offer you a coffee, I think you need one.

Kuba grabs my arm and passes it around his shoulder and we get in a few meters away in a Starbucks still opened. After having installed me at a table, he comes back with two cafés latte.

– Thanks …

I swallow a boiling mouthful and it gives me an immediate boost.

– Why didn’t you go into the ambulance ? asks me Kuba.

– I was not authorized to do so.

– You must deeply love the guy who was taken by the ambulance to be so desperate. Why don’t you try to catch it back ?

– I don’t know …

I decide to tell the whole truth to Kuba and explains him what brought me to Düsseldorf. I owe him at least this for his help. He is the only one in that greedy crowd of onlookers to have come across me.

– Wait, you just found back your “lost love”, and you let him fly away like this ? Move yourself, god damn it !

– Fate doesn’t stop putting spokes in my wheels. What will happen again this time if I see him again, uh ? Tell me !?

– Calm down … What I’m trying to say, is that you must stop to let fate decide for you. You already did that by coming to Düsseldorf, and you must continue by finding Kay once again as soon as possible. Let me tell you something … I’m polish, and a few years back, when I was still living in Poland, I fell in love with a man … while I was in a couple with a chick. It was crazy love. But the kind of totally impossible love. His name was Michal. The problem is that I didn’t do much to keep him by my side. I screw everything up. I didn’t take the right decisions at the right time.

– And what happened ?

– He died … He was found with the skull smashed in an underground parking.

– I’m sorry, I pronounce intuitively, shocked.

I cannot even imagine how I would react if such a thing happened to Kay.

– But the worst, he continues, is that the girl with whom I was became pregnant. Hopefully, she finally decided to abort after a moment. Because I made it clear to her that I had discovered my true nature. That I would not have been able to bring the necessary love to this child. And it was out of question for her to raise the baby alone. After that, I decided to start over and to flee from Poland. I don’t regret it. I’ve left my old demons behind me.

His story reminds me my own a lot. But it also comes to me as a bombshell. Thanks to him, I understand more than ever that I must do everything to get back Kay. Now that I know where he is, I will not abandon him anymore. All my efforts won’t be useless

– You need to find your Kay back. Contrary to me, you still have the possibility to change things. Don’t let that chance escape from you.

– But, how can I know where they brought him ? There must be several hospitals in this city !

– That’s the point, chance, you’ve got some. I’m a nurse nearby. I know well the hospitals in the region. Let me make one or two phone calls, I will find where Kay has been brought.

Kuba stands up immediately and gets out. I wait a few minutes, totally stressed. What if he is not able to find where the first aids brought Kay ? Kuba finally comes back and sits down again in front of me.

– It’s ok, I found him. He was taken to the UniversitätsKlinikum. It’s not that far, I will drive. You can’t take your car with your tiredness state.

I feel a crazy light of hope surge in me.

– I feel better, trust me ! I say in a hurry, ready to go right away.

– You don’t even know where it is ! Stop saying bullshit. So, come one, let’s go there right now.

We leave the Starbucks then head up to Kuba’s car parked near. I am so excited that seconds pass by without I can realize it. On the road, Kuba starts talking to me :

– Listen, I don’t want to alarm you, but according to what the doctor I got on the phone told me, it’s pretty serious. They found a lot of drug in his blood. His state is critical. They have already started to do him a double lavage. In a first time, a stomach lavage, to be sure there is no trace of drug left in his alimentary canal. Then, they will take out some of his blood and transfuse him fresh one at the same time.

I totally freak out at the idea that Kay is not able to endure this. All this process seems very heavy. After several minutes that I don’t count, we finally arrive at the UniversitätsKlinikum. I immediately get out of the car and run to the entrance of the hospital, soon followed by Kuba.

– Follow me, he orders.

We meander through several corridors before arriving in the emergencies service.

I go round and round a hundred of time in the hallway, impatient. At a moment on, I see the first aid worker who had refused me to get in the ambulance dropping in the corridor. He stares at me with a strange air. I’m so mad that I would enjoy smashing my first in his face, but I restrain myself. Better not to look for trouble at the moment. He must reed the fury on my face because he quickly goes on his way.

Kuba finally comes back accompanied by a man in his sixties with a serious face.

– Good evening Sir, he greets me. I’m the emergency doctor.

– Good evening …

– I present to you Marc Borgmann, a close friend of Kay, insists Kuba.

– Your friend got himself into deep shit, Mr. Borgmann. We have proceeded to the stomach lavage, but the entire drug has already penetrated his bloodstream. He risks a cardiac arrest. We have tried to contact his family to inform them but couldn’t find any phone on him, just his wallet, and of course, the rest of his drug … We are now going to proceed to the blood transfusion.

– How is it about to go on starting from now ? I ask.

– Well, generally, we use one or several blood bags to fill in the blood which is being evacuated, all of this mixed with medicines. The problem is, that we don’t have bags with Kay’s blood group anymore, we ran out of them earlier today. We just asked a nearby hospital to bring us some urgently. They are already en route, but the best would be to have a donor from whom we could perform the transfusion directly to avoid losing time.

– What is the blood group of Kay ? speaks Kuba.

– From a first checkup we made when he arrived, A Positive.

I can’t believe my eyes.

– I am also A Positive, I say. Use me. Right now !

– What a godsend ! exclaims the doctor. But before doing anything, you must undertake quick tests and a compulsory questionnaire, we cannot take anyone like this, I’m sure you understand that.

– Let’s not lose some precious time, make these tests now.

We immediately head to a nearby room where a nurse performs some verifications. She does a blood test that she puts into a machine, then asks me diverse questions while the tests are being made. As I have not undergone any surgery or operation in the previous months and do not have any medical history, I am eligible. Which is confirmed once again by the blood tests testifying among other things my blood group.

– Thank god, I think quietly. Kay, I’m gonna get you out of here.

The emergency doctor comes back, and after having received the approbation of the nurse, takes me through the hallway then to a treatment room. There, I find Kay, totally asleep, an oxygen mask on this face. His complexion his more deathly pale than ever, almost cadaveric. This vision hurts me and I feel even guiltier not to have tried finding him back before. We could have prevented all of this. I get closer to him and grab his cold hand. I try to warm it up. With my other hand I caress tenderly his face. I notice that the doctor observes me.

– Who is he in relation to you, actually ? he questions me.

– That’s a long story. But … I love him. And I will never abandon him anymore. So, let’s start, I finish by drying the tears reaching my eyes.

The nurse penetrates in the room accompanied with two other auxiliaries and after several minutes, everything is set up. I’m lying on a bed next to Kay’s, and a cord links up my left arm to his right arm. His left arm is connected to the machine that will extract his blood fouled by drug. I feel the doctor thrust the needle in my arm, and suddenly, I see my own blood reach Kay’s body.

– Well, this will take a few little minutes. Once this will be over, we will have to transfuse you some blood because you are about to give Kay a sizeable amount of yours.

– Very well, I answer.

I grab Kay’s right arm and hold it tight, while I feel my own blood reach his veins. It appeases me to give him my energy and my vital force. I gaze with attention at his sleeping face. It seems to me like he already recovers, which makes me happy.

– Kay, stay with me, I whisper. No more running. No more lies. You are the one I love. Now I’m sure of it, more than ever.

I close my eyes and imagine holding him in my arms. After some minutes, the nurse comes back in the room.

– I think that will be enough, she announces me.

She heads toward the control computers and analyse the data.

– It seems his vital functions are once again stable, his heart beats less fast. He will need a lot of rest now. We have to let him sleep.

The drainage tube is removed from my arm.

– You can follow me, speaks the nurse after putting me a little band-aid.

I wait for her to leave the room, and before joining her, I get closer to Kay, take off his mask even if it must be forbidden, and kiss him gently on his mouth. His lips are still so soft and intense memories surface like flashes upon their contact.

– See you soon, my love.

I surprise myself to let out this sentence I would have never thought saying one day, even to Bettina. Love takes an all-new sense for me now. I have discovered the secret of it, its very essence. I put Kay his mask back, observe him one last time, and then rejoin the nurse. I am given a quick transfusion to fill in the blood I gave to Kay.

Kuba was waiting for me in the hallway. I am surprised to find him still there.

– Kuba, I … I wanted to say thank you for everything. If our paths hadn’t crossed tonight, I don’t know how I would have managed all of this. I would have maybe let Kay to his own fate. Just to think of it, it disgusts me.

– No worries my friend. The nurses told that Kay’s state was a lot more stable. He will go through. Come, I will bring you to your car, you can come back to see him tomorrow morning.

– Ok. But before that, I would like to let a message to Kay. Because I have to leave tomorrow, unfortunately.

I scribble a few words on a piece of paper quickly : “Kay, I am sorry to have taken all this time to come back toward you. I abandoned you like a coward. I don’t know if you will remember our reunion when you will wake up, but know that if it is the case, it was not a dream. I was there, by your side. I will be back in Düsseldorf next week, on Saturday morning, at the train station. I have to go home under obligation. Here is my number if you want to contact me meanwhile. You will wait for me there if you wish so. In any case, I will be there myself. I love you. Marc.”

I address the message to the nurse who took care of me, and ask her to promise me to give it to Kay when he wakes up. I would so much like to stay here until his awakening. Except that I must be back tomorrow at the barracks. My little break is over and my son awaits me.

Kuba brings me back to my car in the town centre of Düsseldorf. Before leaving him, I thank him once again for his precious help and take his number to keep in touch with him. I go back to the hotel but decide not to go to bed. Anyhow I know very well that I won’t be able to find sleep. I pack my stuff, pay my room and leave straight away. When I cross the bridge overhanging the Rhine exiting Düsseldorf, I look one last time in direction of the illuminated city, of the hospital, of Kay.

Then I grab the picture of us I found in his previous apartment and contemplate it while driving.

– Kay, if you’re really willing to give me a second chance despite the bad things I made, then I hope you will be there next Saturday.