You don't need to be a dietitian to see the struggles people have when it comes to their relationship with food. Painfully for some, their food issues go beyond indulging in the occasional pint of ice cream when sad or going on a crash diet. In some cases, deeper behavioral and psychological problems may be involved.

This appears to be the case with adults who have selective eating disorder, as it's been dubbed. Like kids who are picky eaters, these adults limit their diets to only a handful of foods. Such selective eating may cause nutritional deficiencies as well as psychosocial problems. Eating is so much a part of our culture. People notice if your eating behaviors don't conform to the social norm. What if you couldn't participate in family dinners? Or repeatedly declined invitations to business lunches or dinner meetings?

As more light is shed on selective eating disorder, more treatment options may become available. Affected adults are also coming together online via social networks to help one another cope.

Do you struggle with restrictive or selective eating? How do you cope? What advice do you have for others?

65 Comments Posted

I am 45 years old and have been labeled as a picky eater all my life. I would love to go out to eat and look at the menu and be able to have a hard time deciding what to eat because it all sounds so good. Instead, I go to a restaurant and look at the menu praying there is something on it that I can eat. I see commercials on television showing different foods that look terrible to me when it looks delicious to everyone else. It is embarrassing to explain to every person that doesn't already know. They have so many questions and tell me that I just need to try more things. If I could change and like more foods, I would, but there are certain foods that I would absolutely never eat. I like pasta, plain cheese pizza and french fries. I joke that those are my 3 food groups. I like very few vegetables but I do like most fruits. I feel like I have so many rules to eating that make complete sense to me but others find my habits very bizarre. My advice to everyone out there that has this issue or has a loved one with this issue, is to be who you are and try to work your life around it. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Try new foods only if possible.

Tracy from Cincy

July 12, 2015 1:19 p.m.

I am a 17-year-old boy, and I don't think I have it that bad, I can't eat fruits or vegetables. I try to eat some fruit, and while I like the taste, I am repulsed by the sensation it gives my mouth, I try to force myself to eat it, but I am always grossed out, it makes me gag and I just want to spit it out. My mom makes me soup about once a week or so, cooked with tomato and onions. She tries to take them out, but not enough because she wants me to just eat them. When I take a spoonful into my mouth and I sense an onion or tomato (taste and/or biting) I spit it out immediately like a reflex; this goes for any meal that is made with fruits and/or vegetables. My family and friends think it's just picky eating, but they don't understand what goes in my mind when I try to change these habits. I desperately want to be a normal eater, having a balanced diet to be healthy, especially since I am suffering from severe constipation due to a deficiancy in fruits and vegetables. It also keeps me from being physically fit, I may excercise everyday, but I have always been lower than everyone else on my competitive soccer teams, whether it is running or weight lifting. Supplements won't help because they do not give full servings and are not meant to be replacements for food groups. I just want a way around this problem, for my body to be healthy and physically fit

Erik Valdez

June 18, 2015 12:14 a.m.

Reading these comments, I finally feel like I'm not alone! It is concerning that all of these comments are about problems, and none are about solutions. I hope that SED is recognized medically and researched more thoroughly. It would've been nice to know when I was younger and still growing if there was a treatment to help my selective eating habits early on. I hope that word about SED is spread so that children are not punished for what they cannot help. As a child in preschool, my teacher tried to force-feed me a banana, and it left me with bad associations to the fruit ever since. What she didn't understand was that I have SED, and could not help it. This disease needs to be recognized so that those suffering from it are not traumatized by those who misunderstand them!

Mackenzie

August 19, 2014 8:12 p.m.

We'll I'm struggling with SED now and I'm just trying to get
Rid of this I have missed out on so many events birthdays , meals, holidays and it is a living nightmare wen I go for some food for dinner chips (sometimes jam sandwiched ) and tea chips aged and at morning and night toast and for snack I love chrisps (it's like an addiction) ass h can see it's all carbs and I'm constantly hungry I have never had veg or meat or even salad or fried egg as u see as a 13year old I struggle eating to go out with Frends I'm constently looking for solutions my mom mostly but u can see what I meen and I should be seeing a professional soon
-Dylan 13

Dylan

July 12, 2014 11:09 p.m.

I just learned about this and I'm sure I have it. I will not eat any fruit or vegetables except corn, potatos, and artichoke. Which of course is under the condition that they are PLAIN (meaning just butter and salt on them). I like meat for the most part (steak, bacon, pork, chicken, ham, turkey, but no seafood) but I can't handle lunch/deli meat and I've tried sandwiches but even just bread, meat, and cheese makes me gag, I can only eat grilled cheese. Pasta is fine if it just has butter and salt or maybe some cheese but no vegitables or chicken. This has caused me so much insecurity because I feel so rude being at someone's house and not eating what they have to offer for a snack or dinner. Most frito I cannot stand the smell and I will gag if it's too strong, especially Bananas. If my mom makes fruit salad in the kitchen I can smell the bananas from 2 rooms over. I can even smell them if they are just sitting on the counter, even still in the peel. I figure most people probably don't care about what I like and don't like but I just found out there are other people like this and I'm wondering if there is anything I can do about this! I've tried to think about possible options before because I may be starting a family soon and I sincerely worry about the health of a baby when I decide to get pregnant. Anyone with this disorder who was fgone through pregnancy have any advice??

Paige

July 12, 2014 11:08 p.m.

I just learned about this and I'm sure I have it. I will not eat any fruit or vegetables except corn, potatos, and artichoke. Which of course is under the condition that they are PLAIN (meaning just butter and salt on them). I like meat for the most part (steak, bacon, pork, chicken, ham, turkey, but no seafood) but I can't handle lunch/deli meat and I've tried sandwiches but even just bread, meat, and cheese makes me gag, I can only eat grilled cheese. Pasta is fine if it just has butter and salt or maybe some cheese but no vegitables or chicken. This has caused me so much insecurity because I feel so rude being at someone's house and not eating what they have to offer for a snack or dinner. Most frito I cannot stand the smell and I will gag if it's too strong, especially Bananas. If my mom makes fruit salad in the kitchen I can smell the bananas from 2 rooms over. I can even smell them if they are just sitting on the counter, even still in the peel. I figure most people probably don't care about what I like and don't like but I just found out there are other people like this and I'm wondering if there is anything I can do about this! I've tried to think about possible options before because I may be starting a family soon and I sincerely worry about the health of a baby when I decide to get pregnant. Anyone with this disorder who was fgone through pregnancy have any advice??

Paige

July 3, 2014 2:29 a.m.

I have had selective eating disorder since I was about 3 years old. I remember my mother taking me to McDonald's and ordering me a plain burger. She handed it to me and called it a 'picky-burger' knowing that was all I would eat.
Nowadays, all I will eat are fruits, vegetables, yogurt, organic whole milk, and once in a while a Trader Joe's 5 seed Biscuit. Sometimes I can eat other things but it's very rare. No leftovers. I am going to get this checked out because its starting to affect my overall health.

J.P.

June 25, 2014 9:33 a.m.

I'm 19 years old and do not like any vegetable at all, or fruit except cantaloupe. My diet mainly consists of breads, cheese, chicken (grilled well done with some kind of seasoning, chicken tenders) select meat(steak, cheeseburgers, meatloaf), and some dairy like eggs, and milk. I love beverages, I enjoy fruit juices like apple juice and orange juice but hate the fruit as a solid. I drink lots of water and tea. I enjoy a lot of Italian food, such as pasta, chicken parm, meatballs, pepperoni. I also like a few Brasilian foods (picanha, pon de queijo, brigadero, rice) and Mexican food; well Chipotle.. with only brown rice, chicken and extra cheese. It's really hard to cope with only liking a handful of foods, especially going out to dinner with my family or boyfriend. My boyfriend LOVES sushi and I absolutely hate it, as well as seafood in general. I also don't eat sweets, and if I do it's no more than once a month. I've tried new foods (being forced into my mouth) and I just don't like anything. Does anyone else have this problem? or a solution for what I can do? Another issue is that I want to get into shape but it's very difficult to when I can eat what my trainer wants me to eat because of my picky eating. I need answers, please someone help.

Nicollette Rose

June 3, 2014 5:47 p.m.

Looking for help in our area for my 8 year old son who has had the same limited food regimine for 7 years. He is limited to primarily peanut butter, a specific bread, yogurt and crackers. We have been through occupational therapy and he was evaluated by a dietician as well. He is now showing signs of being uncomfortable socially and has avoided parties where he knew pizza would be the food provided. Not sure if this is related but he has quite a defiant personality. I'm looking for options/help/counseling locally in the area of Fresno, CA

Chrissy Paley

April 29, 2014 9:23 a.m.

I have this. I just turned 58. My food selection is probably wider than other people who post here, but I won't eat: any seafood (I've forced myself a couple of times), salad ingredients except carrots (ditto), most fresh fruit (I'll drink orange juice but won't eat oranges, for example), tomatoes (but I love spaghetti sauce), catsup (but ditto for barbecue sauce), salad dressing. It's very odd, and I don't know if there's a therapy out there to help me go to a more normal diet so I can deal with my health problems (diabetes II). At formal dinners I pass on salads and such; I'm suspicious of food I don't recognize. I have gradually increased what I'll eat over the years--I'll eat mushrooms and bell peppers now, for instance. In general, I'll eat processed or cooked versions of foods that I wouldn't touch raw.

Gary

April 11, 2014 8:12 p.m.

I have had this disorder since I could remember. My poor mother didn't know how to deal with it and made things worse. I suffer from PTSD over some of our episodes. I stress out trying to conceal my disorder. I am not 60 years old and I have lost jobs and been ridiculed for my odd eating habits. You would be amazed how many things revolve around eating. Yes, I feel like my life would have been totally different had I not been afflicted with SED. I'd probably have married, had children and grandchildren by now if I didn't have SED. How could you date when most times that involves going out to dinner? I managed to meet a nice man and stuck with him for a long time, but had some others who were what I would call "beneath" me because I think SED contributes to low self-esteem. Anxiety, depression, mind numbing to have to deal with on a daily basis. Nobody appreciates how paralyzing this disorder is and how those afflicted with SED feel like they're freaks because of their disorder. None of my doctors seem to know about the disorder, nor to they appreciate the distress it causes me on a daily basis. Yet one feels powerless to change. I've been reading lately that this is actually neurological in origin; that would certainly go a long way towards explaining things and making people more accepting of the disorder. It's helped me somewhat, but I have a lot of residual anger and PTSD related to all the negativity surrounding growing up with SED. I could go on and on, but I think you get the picture.

Marylou

April 5, 2014 9:56 p.m.

It's wild reading all these comments and how similar they are to what I've dealt with my entire life. I'm 35 and am getting concerned that if I don't start eating better this will be a short life. I am hassled on a daily basis about my eating habits by family, friends and coworkers. Luckily I'm pretty thick-skinned, it doesn't bother me, there are things I don't understand about others just like they don't understand my picky eating habits. Like many others on here I would change it if I could, it make eating healthy a heck of a lot easier. I don't eat veggies, and only like apples and bananas from the fruit family. Pizza, bacon, eggs, cereals, cheeseburgers, steak, chicken and spaghetti, that's about all I eat. I consider myself a strong minded person, and have tried to tell myself it's all in my head and I just need to overcome the mental block. The last time I tried to overcome it I took a bite of a salad, I swear I could taste it for 3 days, from just one bite! Unfortunately all I've seen so far is symptoms, no treatment. I'm not sure how you would even treat something like this, but I hope something comes up soon, I want to live a long and healthy life!

Charlie

April 3, 2014 10:16 p.m.

I'm glad to see so much solidarity around the problem. My son, with evident sensory integration issues ever since he was a baby, is a highly selective eater. Because of a medical condition (often associated with autism, but not necessarily indicating autism) he processes taste, texture and smell in a different way than most people. His diet is almost exactly like what everyone on this forum describes.
What measures have people undertaken to alleviate the problem? What doctors or clinical programs are focused on this issue? Does anyone recommend a doctor or a particular program who might help us intervene? As we are on a Mayo Clinic sight, could I ask the nutritionists who run the forum what they do, or recommend we do for selective eating disorder? Is there a specific program for "desensitizing" sensitive eaters at the Mayo Clinic?

m. l. berry

March 19, 2014 3:59 a.m.

Im 19, i dont eat many foods- some say im fussy and id agree but i cant help it, my childhood was a great at home, school was a little different but eating has been always a challenge. Junk food, chocolate, crisps and sweets have never been a problem for me, but sensible food such a vegetables are complete alien to me. i eat cucumber, raw carrotts and potatoes, apart from that i dont eat anything healthy, with the few foods alreadt listed, i eat most meats, bread-lots of bread, and marmite, that is probaly the extent of my eating habits, maybe the occasional fish finger- healthy right! WRONG. Despite this i am not actually a big girl, but i do worry how I look and try to be smaller by exercise and missing meals- i really do need help. not sure where to get this help from. anyone else feeling like this.

Lucy

March 5, 2014 10:54 a.m.

I can't bare the thought of a lot of food with skin on.. red peppers particularly. I can eat normal sweetcorn but baby sweetcorn go through me.. remind me for some strange reason when cut in half of the anatomy (yes I know strange!). The veins on vegetables have to be cut away and the inside liney things of a mushroom just reminds me of spiders legs so not an option having them! I can eat currants because they're hard.. sultanas no way.. soft and squidgy. People laugh when I am so fussy and call me irritating but due to being vegetarian I already have a limited diet. I won't eat eggs because I found blood in one I cut open and am having digestion problems so now have had to remove wheat and dairy (whatever's left) from my diet.. struggling badly to put a meal together and getting worse as time gets on :-( People think it's funny but to me it's stressful.. I just want to be normal.

Lisa

February 20, 2014 2:43 p.m.

Hi, I'm 18 and I just thought i was extremely picky and there wasn't anything "wrong" with it. My family has always made fun of me for not eating right or yelled at me for not eating what we had for dinner. Even when i would eat at my best friends house her family would tell me that "i eat like a rabbit" because all i would have is some lettuce and raw carrots. I don't mind some veggies but i hate when they are cooked and mushy. I don't eat meat and I never really have since as long as i can remember. My main food groups are fruits, starches, and carbohydrates. Not a very good diet to have. I had time to look it up at work today and found all this information on SED and it's nice to know that I'm not the only one with this issue. Also that people are actually starting to recognize it. My parents think it's an easy fix like it's easy for me to pop new food in my mouth and see if i like it. But it's hard for me because i get so scared that i will puke or gag after eating it. I wish they would understand that i really do want to change but i need help doing it, and it's not something they can really help me with. Just wish they would take me serious about it and not brush it off to the side. I've been like this forever... always known as "the cheap date" and i'm now nervous to go on my date because poeple always give me weird looks when all i do is order water and fries.

Carlson

February 18, 2014 1:07 p.m.

My son is 16 and definitely has this situation. My sister is a RD. She gave me the best advise. DON'T make a big deal out of it. Don't talk about it during the meal time. Don't harp, criticize, force, or humiliate. Once in a while, go to restaurants that serve the food the child will eat and introduce a pleasant, fun time out for socializing with loved ones. Let the child learn how to order exactly what they want, and how they want it prepared. Send it back to the kitchen if it isn't right (no parsley flakes on that plain pasta!) this will help with future encounters with invitations out with friends and co-workers. And yes, chewable vitamins, instant carnation - whatever works. Just love them :)

Kathleen

February 12, 2014 10:18 p.m.

My son has only eaten a handful of things since he started eating food. He has stopped eating a few and picked up a few, but basically only eats about 7 things. None of which are particularly great. I have told every pediatrician since he was a toddler and they blow me off. Recently at age 14, I tried to discuss a possible sensory disorder which I was told no, he eats different textures so it is obviously not a problem with textures. That was the dumbest remark I have ever heard. I am glad to hear this is being recognized and to know we are not alone. My son was aso lectured about his eating habits by the pediatrician and warned about diabetes and being overweight. Like he can control what makes him gag and what doesn't. Like he was choosing to eat this way out of stubbornness or something. Sometimes doctors should listen to parents. Especially when they think something is wrong and have thought it for a long time.

julie

January 29, 2014 11:04 p.m.

I deal with it by accepting it, and moving ON!!!
www.frenchfrylady.com

Marla Lopez

January 24, 2014 11:02 a.m.

My husband has been a picky eater all his life, he is 48 now and recently went through a significant weight loss. (20 pounds lost in about 9 days) .. went to doctor, they ran blood tests and everything was in normal range, said he had an eating disorder and wanted him to go to a psychologist, well that just sent him through the roof...now he won't get go back to doctor and I am worried about him!! :-(

A Wife

January 16, 2014 3:44 p.m.

My Son is almost 20 & moved home from living in a dorm after just 10 days. I wouldn't really recommend it for students who have just a few acceptable foods. An apt. near campus could work because you can groc. shop for your own foods. So weird that a lot of the acceptable & unnaceptable foods are showing up the same in patient after patient. Chicken nuggets & fries & breads OK, other fruits or meats & any veggies, not OK.

marilyn K

January 9, 2014 4:31 p.m.

My almost 11 year old daughter has SED. She is most definitely NOT a "picky eater", it is above and beyond your normal picky eating.
She only eats a handful of foods and her "safe list" is slowly dwindling as she gets tired of the same old, same old.
We need REAL HELP. There has got to be therapists who have treated people with this.
HELP!

Melissa in Minnesota

October 22, 2013 1:29 p.m.

It is such a relief to find that other adults struggle w/ this. I'm 25 and have always been 'picky'. I eat practically no fruits or veggies. When I was a child I would gag on veggies my parents required me to eat. All I could get down was steamed cauliflower w/ butter. My mother, so stressed about my eating habits, once tried to force feed me a banana, &amp; it was one of the most traumatic things I've experienced. I have a very strained relationship w/ food bc I can't handle textures &amp; strong smells. My diet is made up almost entirely of breads and other starches, meat, and dairy. I eat everything plain and dry. I can drink smoothies &amp; fruit juices as long as it's completely puréed. I love tomato but can't eat raw tomato or have chunks of it in my pasta sauce or soup. I was recently at lunch w/ new coworkers &amp; it was 'buffalo chicken wrap day'. I was too embarrassed to ask for no lettuce/tomato, &amp; just ordered it thinking I could suck it up. I couldn't even eat 1/4 of it. I was gagging on the lettuce and tomato (which has almost no flavor!), I just COULDN'T deal w/ the crunch and texture. I said I wasn't hungry &amp; 'saved it for later'. Eating socially is anxiety inducing, &amp; the idea of going on dates is terrifying. It's a real struggle &amp; not a choice, and I can't &quot;Just eat it&quot; even though I know this isn't healthy in the long run and I'm terrified about how to feed my future children. Would love advice about how to tackle this or know wha

lacey

October 13, 2013 10:50 p.m.

My daughter is 14 years old and absolutely has SED. What resources are available for teens? She needs to know that she is not alone, be validated that SED is not a choice, and gain coping skills. Just having me tell her all if this is not enough. I worry about depression setting in. Help!

Linda

October 13, 2013 6:12 p.m.

I have struggled my whole life with SED and I'm almost 61. I will NOT eat meat, and just in the last few years have ventured out to eating a few select vegetables...My sense of smell is very sensitive and many foods make me gag...almost like my throat closes up...so there's lots of stuff I won't even try. Color is also a factor. It's easier for me to name the foods I WILL eat. It's a short, short list. Yes, it's embarrassing...but it doesn't seem to be anything I can change, although I wish I could. This is not a LIFE CHOICE...this has been going on since I was a little girl. I wish I could change it, but at this point of my life - probably wont happen

Anita

September 20, 2013 10:34 p.m.

Im 28 now but remember consciously beginning to avoid foods in high school. I also remember my mom making deals with me to eat healthy foods when i was little. i have been harrassed by my family for as long as i can remember about how picky i am, how im a &quot;cheap date,&quot; how i need to expand my taste buds, how my taste buds will change, or how going out is an ordeal because the menu has to to be &quot;missy friendly.&quot; my main issues with food are smell, texture, and appearance. my sense of smell is sensitive and i gag fairly easily at foods i either tried and dislike or new foods i refuse to try. i refuse to eat whole categories of foods like Asian cuisine or seafood of any kind. i cant sit at a dinner table w/ a steak or any red meat within smelling distance of me or i'll throw up. the list of foods i refuse to eat is longer than what i will eat. my safe foods are usually bland, plain, or &quot;kid like.&quot; i order the same thing every time i go out - i do not like to try new things. im not sure these eating habits are psychological or not, but i do notice high anxiety, esp if im around others and food is involved. my diet is not healthy, and ive been trying to change it, but it is very hard to do. you cant force foods upon people or yell at them to &quot;just eat it.&quot; im glad SED is becoming more well known because this is not something i do on purpose and it isnt something i can turn off with a switch. i usually try to eat alone or around people who k

Missy

September 17, 2013 12:42 p.m.

Kelly, I'm a mom of a 4 and a 5 year old and I have what I now know is S.E.D. or Selective Eating Disorder. Reading your comment below really hits home with me. I've struggled with this my whole life and went through the same things your son did. Now as a mom it's harder, because I want my kids to eat healthy balanced diets and I see my 4 year old showing signs of S.E.D. It's hard to say when they are so young if they'll grow out of it or not. I've been blaming myself and I feel just like you said,&quot;I wish I could take the fear &amp; anxiety away&quot;. I applaud you for recognizing that your son is more than &quot;just picky&quot; and standing up for him. I never knew how my mom felt about my selective eating and in the end I feel it drove a wedge between us that she wouldn't acknowledge it.

Anonymous

June 27, 2013 12:31 p.m.

I can't tell you how refreshing it is to find other people that are going thru the same thing as my son! He's 15 and since birth was very limited in what he would eat. Chicken nuggets, french fries, limited fruits, no meat or veggies at all. Family members were cruel, always saying, he's just picky, this is your fault, you give into him to much. If he gets hungry enough he'll eat it. They don't understand how he's constantly made fun of and tormented. He would change in a heartbeat if he could. Even his own doctor doesn't understand &amp; just told him to &quot;eat more veggies&quot;...really??? And you call yourself a doctor? I wish I could take this from him. I wish I could take the fear &amp; anxiety away.

Kelly

March 20, 2013 8:17 a.m.

Thanks Katie!!!
We have taken our son to a behavioral therapist and she is working on exactly those coping techniques you mentioned. It's too soon to know whether that will work, but it is definitely encouraging to read your comments.
God bless and continued progress for you and your son!

Scott

March 15, 2013 11:10 a.m.

This comment threat has helped a lot. SED describes my boyfriend perfectly - he only eats pepperoni pizza or chicken fingers and fries for meals, and select snack foods like bacon, cheez its, etc. I know it causes him a lot of anxiety, as people make fun of him for &quot;eating like a kid&quot;, etc. I know he doesn't want to eat the way he does, and is embarrassed by it [though he doesn't let on to most people how extreme it is].
I want to help him without being too pushy. I haven't even showed him this article because I don't want to come across like I'm trying to &quot;fix&quot; him or anything. But reading this forum is definitely helpful! I myself am a foodie, who loves all kinds of different things, so this is an intimidating thing to deal with, but I want to understand as much as I can.
I know this is probably awful, and wouldn't work with everyone, but we've found that if he's been drinking, sometimes he'll actually be more willing to try new things [that's how he found chicken fingers - for a long time he would only eat pizza] and doesn't get nauseous/sick. Obviously this isn't a preferred method [we can't just get him drunk all the time] but I guess that might mean it could be about relaxing? Just a thought.

Cassie

March 15, 2013 12:33 a.m.

I know, I know. I just posted, but as I read more comments, I definitely noticed more questions than helpful suggestions. I may be 23, but I can remember the good &amp; bad parenting I dealt with in regard to my eating habits. 1. One comment said to let your child eat what they want, &amp; to encourage the healthy foods they are interested in. Right on. My mom used to make a deal with me as a child - for every healthy thing I ate (things I liked), I would get a special prize, like Barbie clothes or quarters to buy my own stuff. 2. Don't shove food down your kid's throat when they don't want it. This causes so much anxiety over meals &amp; food in general. I'm not surprised by how many commenters have issues now because of this (myself included). 3. Don't treat their habits awkwardly, or act embarrassed by it, both privately &amp; publicly. A kid can tell &amp; it makes them feel abnormal, as well as insecure because they feel the parent isn't proud to have them as their child - w/ or w/out the eating habits. They know they're different. Other kids at school make sure of that. Not making a fuss will have them thinking it's normal &amp; they'll feel more confident in themselves (Thanks mom! =]). 4. Get some multivitamins in that child! I didn't learn how beneficial it was until a few years ago. Growing kids desperately need the nutrients. 5. Be upfront when the child asks you about SED. I obviously never knew until today, but I think knowing would have helped me early on. Hope

Courtney

March 14, 2013 11:50 p.m.

I'm 23 and have been a picky eater my whole life. Over the years, I've had many friends and adults try to &quot;diagnose&quot; me, or debate my eating habits - as if it's a life choice I've made. Today I had yet another friend send me an article about picky eaters. I didn't want to read it, but did so only because she's my best friend. Wow. I'm so glad I read the article. I have experienced almost everything it discussed about SED! I always knew I was pickier than most people, but never considered it being an eating disorder. While I've visited picky eater forums online, knowing there is an actual community of people like me helps to validate my habits as real, and not something I'm just being a baby about. Thank you!
Some of y'all, as well as the article, asked how we may have gotten past certain aspects of SED. I have coached myself over the years about learning to like foods (even if they're just side dishes or kid meals) for the sake of having normal relationships with others and the ability to go to any restaurant. It has always been a struggle to accept my eating habits for what they are. I just don't like food! It doesn't help that I have never been one to eat large amounts of food in one meal either. A few years ago, I started taking a multivitamin when I saw they had chewables. That has made a tremendous difference in how I feel daily. I have more energy am not nearly as tired as I used to be. I now fully recognize the lack of nutrition due to my limited palate.
-

Courtney

February 1, 2013 7:11 p.m.

Hi Scott,
There is definitely help for your son. My son had a similar problem with food. At age 5, he ate 5 things. I found a very good Behavioral Therapist. First they taught him coping skills for anxiety - Deep Breathing Techniques, methods for stopping anxiety in its tracks, relaxation techniques which he could use to keep himself from getting anxious. Then using a very slow, methodical process we identified foods that were very similar to the ones he ate, so little by little he expanded the list of food that he ate. For example you mention that he likes dry cereal, try taking him to the store and letting him pick out a very similar cereal (ex: froot loops, cheerios with fruit, or trix). Use this to show him that similar foods can taste good. This can be done with breads (A progression might be from white, to italian, to potato, wheat, multigrain) Later try bagels or dinner rolls.
My son now eats 100s of different types of foods. The coping skills are used before trying new foods, so the child is relaxed and doesn't get anxious.
We continue to build upon this method combining foods to make sandwiches, pasta dishes (with or without sauces) and even healthy desserts).
Rewards were given for progress made(Sticker charts representing new foods, or trips to the ice cream shop)
The progression can be very slow, but sometimes a child surprises you. When we took my child to the store, there were all types of foods that he considered 'good' to try.
Good luck

Katie

January 29, 2013 11:06 p.m.

My six year-old son displays all of the symptoms of selective eating disorder. He will only eat bacon, dry cereal, chicken fingers, corn chips and apples. Of course, he will eat most sweets. He is now starting to have a very difficult time concentrating in just about any setting including school. He is normal height, but very thin. We have taken him to his pediatrician, a doctor specializing in eating disorders and a pychiatrist. Nothing is working. He is the most wonderful, loving child in the world but I can see that his life is starting to be severely impacted. I have no idea what to do. His eating has been this way since he was 18 months, prior to that he would eat anything we put on his plate. Help.

Scott

January 28, 2013 5:22 p.m.

It's mad, i'm 30yrs old and this is the first time I've ever looked this up. I have spent years defending and trying to explain my eating habits to friends, family, work mates. Some people just except it as a part of who I am, while others just can't understand and want to debate it. I've never let it stop me doing anything like going out to a restaurant for a meal but it makes it all the more stressful and embarrassing depending who your out with. I don't eat any fruit or veg, my diet mainly consists of bread, cheese, potato and meat, everything plain. I don't think i'm unhealthy, i'm rarely sick, I believe that my body has adapted and gets what it needs from what i eat. It boils down to the look the smell and then the texture if it gets past the lips!! Everyone says &quot; how do you know you don't like it if you won't try it?&quot;, well my response is, &quot;is that not what your senses are for!!&quot; because the last thing i tried was an onion, and i got sick everywhere!! If you think about it we came from caves,all that was on the menu was meat not fancy dishes and salads! My best mate is vegetarian, I refer to her as the herbivore and I'm the carnivore!!! I try to laugh about it all because at the end of the day this is me,but if I could change this one thing tomorrow i would.

flow

November 17, 2012 1:18 p.m.

PS I wish everyone on this site well. Growth, understanding, self-love and patience with self and others. Blessings~

Lisa

November 17, 2012 12:56 p.m.

My boyfriend is a picky eater and i love most all foods, pretty much am a foodie. I am educating myself to try and understand SED. He will eat bland or some sweet. Pumpkin but not squash or sweet potatoes or chocolate. Plain turkey sandwiches or plain hamburgs almost every day for lunch, popcorn or animal crackers after he works out, for dinner. Carrots and crackers. Chili, meatloaf, french fries and pizza. He wants to eat healthier (we both work out) and i know it involves going slow and being patient. We're looking for a healthy, don't have to fix it option for a snack/dinner that he'll try. When i mentioned bananas which he will eat, he said, 'I've never had bananas at night' so it's also just making slow changes. I said, you can have popcorn and animal crackers one or 2 nights and maybe try one new thing for one night to add nutrients. I am detaching when i need to. I try to add suggestions when he asks, otherwise i try and leave his eating to him. It is so beyond my experience and understanding. I appreciate the posts here. They help, thanks.

Lisa

November 8, 2012 4:18 p.m.

I am 21 years old and I have been picky all of my life. I have eaten the same 10-15 things all of my life and most are like pizza. I thought I was alone until today. I have been looking things up all day. I need help and dont know where to find it. Im sick all the time and never have energy to do anything. My son is almost 3 and I dont want him to be like me. I want to change.
I have never tried things that most people love to eat everyday like hamburgers, steak, any vegetables, any fruit besides bananas, tacos pretty much anything. smells, textures, the way things look, and thickness all effects if I want to eat it or not. Though its may seem like it wouldnt effect everything I do it does. People thing Im weird and no one ever really gets used to it. Thanksgiving is a horrible holiday to me. If anyone knows where I can get help please let me know.

Victoria

November 1, 2012 7:54 a.m.

I am 28 and have never been a picky eater, even as a child. i always ate what was infront of me. Over the past few months my relationship with food has changed. Im slowly going off meat, I can no longer eat a sandwich. Breakfast &amp; Dinner times are fine. My only problem is the dreaded LUNCH TIME that I stuggle with every single day. I will only eat crunchy things. I can eat toast, but not bread....I would gag. Its so strange &amp; I just wondered why all of a sudden this has happened.

kim

October 17, 2012 4:17 p.m.

As a child growing up on a farm, I didn't like anything except meat (and poultry), potatoes, corn, apples, bananas, homemade desserts, chicken noodle soup, fried catfish, doughnuts, hot chocolate and white bread. My father forced me to eat cold mashed potatoes (we didn't have electricity at the time so we didn't warm up foods after having the first round at lunch or dinner as we called it then). He also made me eat lima beans. I spent almost every meal gagging and crying. I am almost 69 years old, have fought my weight all my life, now have heart issues, back issues and inflammatory problems. I have learned to eat a few vegetables, pizza (which is now my favorite thing), salad (no cucumbers, onions or carrots on them), tuna straight out of the package and cooked carrots. I am very social, upper middle class and have had so many embarrassing social situations. Fear of someone's not having anything I'll eat at a dinner causes pre-meal nausea. Eating with Mexican and Asian people is the most difficult because of their &quot;mixed up&quot; dishes and the smell. When my children were born, I cooked a well-rounded meal, put it on their plates, never discussed likes and dislikes and gave them dessert (when available) even if they didn't eat their meal. They are 46 and 42, travel all over the world and eat everything. My advice to parents is to serve the meal and let it be but, if they don't eat, don't offer something they do like after dinner. They won't starve.

Rita

October 1, 2012 3:37 p.m.

My son is 3 and a very,very picky eater (not just the &quot;normal&quot; 2 year old who doesn't eat many vegetables). He has been receiving therapy from a speech pathologist (feeding specialist) for a year. It's a problem when kids (or adults) exclude entire food categories (e.g., fruits, vegetables, meats, etc.). I highly recommend the book Food Chaining for anyone who has a child with being too picky. A tell-tale sign is when a child gags, coughs, or throws up when eating new foods. There can be underlying medical conditions that can cause this. Look up Food Chaining on Amazon; it will teach you a lot!

M

September 22, 2012 1:24 p.m.

For the last 18 years, we were told that our daughter would outgrow her refusal to try new foods, the gagging and spitting out of new foods, and the emotional turmoils at mealtime. Late in speech development, she was initially diagnosed with PPD. But with high academic achievement, success in social circles, and exemplary artistic talents, we figured it was all in the past. The only foods she will eat are fried, salty, sugary, BBQed meat, popcorn, plain pasta, one brand of apple and grapes. Unlike her friends, she will not try pizza, hot dogs, hamburgers, macaroni and cheese, any vegetable, anything with sauces, not even a salad! My husband and I are decent cooks and eat normally. Holidays are a disaster! We never wanted to create a problem but now wonder if by ignoring it we have created our own private disaster. The question of obesity is now a problem with diabetes, heart, stroke, running in the family. We feel like failures. If only we had knowledgeable help years ago. HELP!

Vickie

September 12, 2012 2:25 p.m.

Wow, reading all the comments were better than the short article... I am a mother of a 12 year old daughter that eats 9 things... and has been this way her entire life. I am now at my wits end and doing as much reasearch as I can to see what / if anything can be done. Thank you everyone for helping me feel not so &quot;alone&quot;.

Glenna

September 9, 2012 5:50 p.m.

I have been a picky eater all 58 years of my life. When I was a child everyone tried to make me eat meat. Today most people respond positively and say they don't eat much meat either or they say it is probably healthier My health is good.. I can find something to eat at most restaurants. When we have dinner at friend's home I take something I will eat with enough to share. Works for me. Own who you are and how you eat!

kay

August 24, 2012 4:41 p.m.

I had no idea this was a recognised disorder – I just thought I was a very picky eater.
I’m 47 and have never eaten properly since the age of about 3. Mealtimes with my parents were always very stressful as my father would force a fork into my mouth laden with cabbage or other food I hated. I had to pour salt onto dreaded boiled potatoes to disguise their taste but would still end up gagging on them and unable to swallow them. Often I would end meals being spanked over my father’s knee and sent to my room for refusing to eat and it was always a relief to leave the table. One turning point was as a very young child when mum fed me lumpy sliced bananas in thick custard which left me gagging and retching. To this day I still cannot stay in the same room as an unskinned banana.
My diet is now very restricted – I eat simple breakfast cereals eg dry cornflakes or rick krispies (no milk), bread (no butter/marg etc), fish fingers or frozen breadcrumb-coated fish, thin oven chips, kippers, bacon, plain ready-salted crisps, far too much chocolate and very occasional strawberries or raspberries. There are very few other foods I’ll touch – definitely nothing ‘foreign’, spicy, sloppy or messy such as pizza. I drink cold diluted squash and don’t have any hot drinks, tea or coffee.
I know my diet is unhealthy and I’m a little under-weight but have a very slim build. I also suffer with emetophobia, a fear of vomiting which is linked to my eating problems. This is a life-long p

KLW

July 31, 2012 6:18 p.m.

I am a lifelong picky eater but also an educated healthcare professional. It has taken me a long time to be open about my eating habits, but now I am able to talk openly about what things I eat and it has helped to alleviate the anxiety and shame. Based on personal experience, I would advise parents of picky eaters to inform and educate their children on healthy eating and encourage the foods that they do like that are healthy, even if that means not a lot of variety. I have continued to work to add healthy foods to my repertoire over the years on my own terms. It is not the parents' fault, and it is not the child's fault. Try to listen to your child and work with them to make their diet more healthy. It's definitely not an easy task for the best of parents, but working against them will not be productive. I don't necessarily think the eating habits represent a psychological disorder, but the stress and anxiety that they can cause may lead to one.

Jess

July 31, 2012 2:43 p.m.

Dr. Nancy Zucker at Duke University is actively researching SED (selective eating disorder) in adults. The the American Psychiatric Association is considering its inclusion in the next edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), the official compendium of emotional and mental disorders. Dr. Zucker has a treatment plan for SED. She can help.
http://www.livescience.com/10301-adult-picky-eaters-recognized-disorder.html

Mel

July 25, 2012 12:44 p.m.

My son is 30 years old. He was a normal eater until he was about 4. At that time, he began to eliminate things from his diet. It alarmed me enough that I began the rounds of doctors, oral surgeons, psychologists, all of whom told me all kids are picky, he's healthy, he's growing, leave him alone. I think had he been a teenage girl I'd have been taken more seriously. I put up with lots of &quot;advice&quot; from other people - starve him, make him eat punish him - nasty looks from waitresses who'd wonder why we weren't ordering something for our son (we'd always feed him ahead of time) to the now heartbreaking discussions with my adult son who doesn't know how to conquer this disorder. What surprises me is how little support there is for this. I met a 67 y.o. man who eats only popcorn, hamburgers and cinnamon rolls. A girl who eats nothing white. My son is brand-exclusive re some foods, can't stand smells, textures or even the look of some things. He is taking supplements but knows how much his missing out on by being different when it comes to food. We've worked with the social aspects of food - how to make it look like you're eating if you are not, grazing and putting a plate down, ordering something for the table to share and then not taking a share himself. That's helped him socially, but he still doesn't eat much of any variety. My heart goes out to anyone who is going through this. Don't be dismissed and try not to let it drive you crazy. Get support whereve

Diane

July 23, 2012 9:58 p.m.

Looks like this is not going to be the site to get advice &amp; support on Selective Eating Disorder. Too much ignorance &amp; judgement &amp; no treatment ideas. My friend's 6 year old boy eats a handful of foods. Limited to certain brands! He has an aversion to the smell &amp; texture of almost all foods. It's difficult to watch him and his parents struggle. They wonder if he will just &quot;grow out of it&quot; and worry @ how this will affect his future. Does anyone have any practical advice or knowledge out there @ this true disorder?

Elizabeth

July 21, 2012 9:25 p.m.

I am also the parent of a child with this disorder. It is difficult for him and our family. He has been in food therapy for a year now. I fear it will be forever. He has always been this way, and I fear he always will be. We worry about his nutrition daily. My son won't even try a juice. Only milk or water. At 6, he is beginning to struggle taking a multivitamin, which has been our one in the plus column. I would love to hear of treatments, clinics, parent support groups, etc.

Jaime

February 6, 2012 1:36 p.m.

My husband and I are both picky eaters. My picky habits are not from taste, but from texture. I love tomato products, but I can't stand raw tomatoes for example. There are also some foods I can't even stand the smell. My parents tried to get me to try new foods, but it was not easy. I like canned green beans but can't stand fresh cooked. My parents tried to force me to eat some and I ended up throwing up all over my plate. This was not their fault and it was something I could not control. My husband dislikes much of the same foods as me, and then some. But we are really unhealthy because of our limits on food, and we are going to start exercising together and adding more fruits and veggies to our meals. Nothing too big for now, just going to start small. I'm hoping it helps us, and show our future kids healthy eating habits.

Katie

January 2, 2012 2:25 p.m.

Can a child have food phobia with selective eating? Shouldn't new foods be put on the plate with tiny bites until the child will finally take a bite. This is a confusing topic. I've talked to people who work with children who eventually try something new. It make take a dozen times to try.

Mary

July 8, 2011 8:13 p.m.

I have 7 children ages 4 through 21. Everyone of them eat a variety of foods and are not too afraid to try something new, except my sons who are 10 years old and 4 years old. They both ate &quot;normal&quot; until they were about 2 years old. Then they gradually dismissed foods they used to like, little by little. And I don't want to force them to eat food they don't want, but I'm worried they don't get all the nutrients their growing bodies need. My youngest son is a total vegetarian, eats only milk and cereal, pancakes, peanut butter, plain bread, selected fruits, pretzels and crackers. And V8 juice, cranberry juice or apple juice. Oh and french fries with ketchup. And I limit cookies and candy. But I wish I knew how to get him back to eating more different foods, and his brother too!
And if we are in some occasion where food is offered, I always have to listen to how I pamper my kids by letting them eat for instance plain toast instead of burgers, chicken or whatever else they are serving. It makes me feel like I am a bad mom. Even my husband, their dad, says that I let them get away with too much when it comes to meals. He even takes their cheerios with milk and dramatically throws it in the sink, if he sees them eating that instead of dinner, and says if they don't eat what we offer, they can go hungry! So arguments between my husband and I occur in front of the kids because of this, and I believe this just makes matters worse. If anybody has advice, please let me know!

Lisa

February 16, 2011 1:08 p.m.

My son has this disorder. And, yes, it is a disorder. He has vomited when he has agreed to try new foods. It is truly a struggle to make sure that he is getting the proper nutrition since he eats no meat, no fruits, no vegetables and no dairy other than chocolate milk. I'm glad this is coming to light and hope that we can find more information on it that will help us. Oh, and as for vitamins, yes, he takes a daily multi vitamin but not all of the components can be absored into the body without being accompanied by certain foods. It helps, but does not replace the nutrition he's missing out on in his diet.

Julie

January 22, 2011 10:25 a.m.

There is an online support group at pickyeatingadults.com

Bob

January 18, 2011 4:20 p.m.

Hi-My daughter is 13 years old and i bleieve that she has &quot;Selective Eating Disorder&quot;. She will only eat grilled cheese, chicken fries(Tyson only), french fries, cheese bread but not cheese pizza. No fruits and no veggies-only certain brands of choc milk. Most juices are too sour for her. At my ropes end-not only cause problems for her but for the other people in your life that do not understand-and think you are just letting them get away with something by controlling the food. Please halep with any advice. and obviosuly Travis has not gone through any of this or he would keep his ignorant opinion to himself.

Kellie

January 8, 2011 10:35 a.m.

Oh come on being a picky eater is not a disorder, why is it every aspect of someones life thats not &quot;normal&quot; a disorder. I am a picky eater, i only like limited foods n its fine. Im an adult i can say no thanks i dont like that. At work they bbq all the time n they feel bad cause i dont like hamburgers or hotdogs n i tell them not to worry about it, its not their fult im a picky eater. If u become less social because of being avpicky eater u do have a disorder but its not a eating disorder its a mental disorder. To afraid of people judging u. As for a nutiton difficency, just take multivitamins thats what i do.

Travis

December 21, 2010 5:50 p.m.

I'll come right out and admit I'm a picky eater. Its hard being confronted by others on why you're not eating or if even asked to try this or that. You just can't help but refuse because none of the food looks appealing.
But I do eat bland food. I can't stomach eating a veggie no matter how &quot;disguised&quot; it is and if I see it hiding in my food...oh beware...I'll look at my food in a whole new light and will search for other intruders (neurotic much?). I love fruit, don't get me wrong, but my diet consists pretty much of meat, cheese, bread, pasta, and lettuce (along with any fruits that are in season.)
It's probably all in my head that I can't stomach the texture nor the taste of veggies so I rely on a multivitamin to supplement me. I don't really see myself recovering from this disorder so I've just learned to cope with it and pray I don't get sick because of it.

Kalli

October 13, 2010 10:17 a.m.

marry me tracy-lol i am the same as you,i know exactly how you feel,for me thanksgiving and social settings like weddings are dreadful -denia does not understand at all,i dont have control over anyone dont ask for my food to be to my way if i dont eat it ill wait till later and ill make it myself,lots of people couldnt eat those foods on fear factor show,to me 90% of food is just as appalling - i dont want or wish to be this way

Donald

August 21, 2010 8:00 a.m.

love this topic.
Being a picky eater may somewhat seems like it's good in some way. For example, some may not like sweet stuffs. This may be good. As a high daily sugar intake can cause many health problems.
However, too low of a daily sugar intake may not be good.
So... I'm not really sure if being a picky eater is actually good or bad. Hmmmmmm...

delish

August 3, 2010 4:08 p.m.

This is an interesting topic! I've always been a picky eater but I've come a long way over the years by trying to keep an open mind and trying new things. It still surprises me, though, when people think that your palate should match theirs. &quot;You don't like tomatoes? But they're sooo good!&quot; It's funny, really. But you're uncovering a greater issue here with selective eating disorder and that's fascinating to me. I could understand and relate to several of the issues you mentioned here. Thanks for the intriguing post.
Jen Melo, author of the I will eat better diary
http://www.homemakers.com/blog/eatbetter/

Jen

July 29, 2010 3:01 a.m.

My son was always a picky eater and underweight. I tried to get him to eat a &quot;healthy diet&quot;, then at 13 he was diagnosed with Crohn's disease. Some of the things he refused to eat, such as raw tomatoes, his doctor vorbid - because the peel might get caught in the places where his intestines are very narrow.
I will never ever again force or suggest that someone eat something that they don't want. Maybe their body knows something that their mind or mother doesn't.

Linda

July 28, 2010 7:41 p.m.

Grow up kiddo..you are a hostile person.
You control people by your avoidance of normal eating. You can eat vegetables and be very socially acceptable, however, you have chose through some distorted manner, to eat them only as you prepare them, How handy..making people bend to you will.
Get counseling, cookie !

denia

July 28, 2010 4:47 p.m.

My husband had the same attitude about food as you do when I met him 30 years ago. I, on the other hand, will eat just about anything. We had quite a tumultous few years until he realized that there really is some good tasting foods out there. My advise to you: go slowly, pick one item and try it. Perhaps find a recipe that might appeal to you that uses this item and make it. Don't force yourself to try many new foods at once - that is disaster. One step at a time will do it. Good luck.

barbara

July 24, 2010 6:15 p.m.

I have been a selective eater for as far as I can remember. At 26 years old my diet is limited to what a 4 year old would eat. I eat very plain food, with no frills, no fruits or vegetables. I could pretty much count the different items I will eat on my fingers. This makes it extremely difficult to go out since I know that most menus will not accommodate my tastes and as a result I tend to schedule my day around meal times in order for me to be home.
This is having a severe impact on my social life since most are scheduled around a meal. I wish I had advice on how to move beyond my limited menu and to take back control of my life, but I don’t. I am looking for advice as far as how to move past this.

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