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k, a few things but i didn't wanna out 2 many threads :\ first, me, lately i have been pretty depressed, i feel like i don't do anyone any good and that there is no point in me living, and it's true, and i have thought a lot about killing myself, so much that i have written my will and funeral plans, and i know where i can end it. i have talked to my friends who are going through the same thing and one of them have tried to kill herself many times, the most recent was a couple of days ago, she won't tell me how she did, it didn't work thankfully. so it's not a load of shit. i have started drinking sometimes, just to take the edge off, not been really drunk and it doesn't work much but it still sorta works, and it's not for fun! i have taken a few online depression tests and they all say i am "severely depressed" :\ i don't wanna feel like this all the time! i can't :'(
secondly, my friend, she's tried to kill herself a few times, but i can't help her, would that not be hypocritical? so what do i do about both things?

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hear the dogs singin' out if key, to a hymn called faith and misery <3

Kyle, your posts always concern me because they all seem so ominous and you struggle with so many difficult issues......and you're just at the very beginning of adolescence at 12 and I worry that you don't have the coping skills and resources available to you to handle what's about to happen as you get further into adolescence.

So, i'll respond to this latest crisis..and then offer a bit of longer term advice, and I really would strongly encourage you to pay close attention and give what I'm about to say serious thought and follow thru.

First, it's not a good sign that your friends (who I'll assume are also about 12) are as unhappy and have actually not only thought and talked about suicide..but made some attempts. This isn't good for obvious reasons, but also b/c when you're around a lot of people who talk (and do) things, it becomes 'normal', and it makes it somehow more acceptable than it really is. We call that the 'Contagion effect', and it's very bad. You guys need to support each other and help each other be the best people you can and deal with stuff in good ways, not talk all morose and self destructive. If you cannot do this, if you guys cannot bring out the best...optimistic..side of each other, it's time to find new friends. You're all too vulnerable, and this could quickly snow ball out of control.

Second, the long term fix here is for you to tell some trusted adult that you're really unhappy and need to talk with someone..a therapist or doc...and start that process of not only getting the support you need to get thru all this, but also learn more appropriate coping skills. One part is the stuff you face, the other part is gaining the skills necessary to handle it. Maybe encourage your friends to do the same.

Kyle, your posts always concern me because they all seem so ominous and you struggle with so many difficult issues......and you're just at the very beginning of adolescence at 12 and I worry that you don't have the coping skills and resources available to you to handle what's about to happen as you get further into adolescence.

So, i'll respond to this latest crisis..and then offer a bit of longer term advice, and I really would strongly encourage you to pay close attention and give what I'm about to say serious thought and follow thru.

First, it's not a good sign that your friends (who I'll assume are also about 12) are as unhappy and have actually not only thought and talked about suicide..but made some attempts. This isn't good for obvious reasons, but also b/c when you're around a lot of people who talk (and do) things, it becomes 'normal', and it makes it somehow more acceptable than it really is. We call that the 'Contagion effect', and it's very bad. You guys need to support each other and help each other be the best people you can and deal with stuff in good ways, not talk all morose and self destructive. If you cannot do this, if you guys cannot bring out the best...optimistic..side of each other, it's time to find new friends. You're all too vulnerable, and this could quickly snow ball out of control.

Second, the long term fix here is for you to tell some trusted adult that you're really unhappy and need to talk with someone..a therapist or doc...and start that process of not only getting the support you need to get thru all this, but also learn more appropriate coping skills. One part is the stuff you face, the other part is gaining the skills necessary to handle it. Maybe encourage your friends to do the same.

we try and help each other, and give advice, and i can't find new friends, they r the only ones who know how i feel, seeing a doc is out of the question, my parents can't know, and half the time the on;y give u sugar pills. adults know fuck all, u can't trust them because they are liars and can't keep things to themselves. i want help but it's hopeless :( and i can't live like this.

_______________________________

hear the dogs singin' out if key, to a hymn called faith and misery <3

When all the trees have been cut down,
when all the animals have been hunted,
when all the waters are polluted,
when all the air is unsafe to breathe,
only then will you discover you cannot eat money.
~ Cree Prophecy ~

What makes you think they will not understand? depression is a well known and scientifically proven illness.

When all the trees have been cut down,
when all the animals have been hunted,
when all the waters are polluted,
when all the air is unsafe to breathe,
only then will you discover you cannot eat money.
~ Cree Prophecy ~