Tag Archives: career strategies

Many people I talk to struggle with feeling over committed, overwhelmed and overworked. Do you have a faithful companion who supports you in your important quests? Or are you trying to fight for law and order in your ‘town’ on your own?

Here are 7 signs that you’re maxing out on your effectiveness.

1. You’re routinely one of the last people to leave the office
There really is a limit to the amount of stuff you can do in a 24-hour period. When you try to do too much, you routinely work into the evening or even late at night. Other people seem to be able to get out of the office at a decent hour, but not you.

2. The work you take home with you causes problems for your family
Your family complains because you’re always on your computer, cell phone or laptop. They miss you and want to ‘play’ with you but you’re to busy doing ‘important’ work.

3. You feel resentful of the people around you
When you’re dealing with too much to do, it could seem like others around you are sloughing off.

The reality is that you’re responsible for your situation and your feelings. If you’re complaining bitterly (and silently) to yourself, speak up. If you need help, ask for it.

4. You miss deadlines
One of the problems of having too much on your plate is that your work suffers. There never seems to be enough time in the day. You have too many commitments to keep up with them all. Your reputation suffers as does your self-respect.

5. Your schedule is filled with too many (unimportant) activities
You may feel important and ‘in demand’ but if you look, it’s possible that time is sucked up because you can’t say “No!”. You agree to things that are inconsistent to your big goals (if you’ve even bothered to create them).

6. Your big goals are languishing on the back burner of your life
As a result, you never get to the things you say are truly meaningful. That vacation of a lifetime, the book inside you, the relationship, the call to a family member or long-term friend. You may secretly fear you’ll end up alone.

7. You don’t enjoy work anymore
When all of these things add up, it casts a heavy cloud over your days. The job you once loved is now a burden. Your health suffers and does your spirit.

As you may have heard me say, “We have more options than we generally see and more control than we tend to take. It’s time for you to take control.”

Make requests. Ask for help. Say “No”. Remind yourself what your life is about. (Hint: It’s probably NOT what other people are telling you it should be about.

You get to choose. Look into your heart and ask, “If this were my last year on earth, what would I be spending my time doing?“, then re-prioritize and get started.

Whether you own your own company or work for someone else, it’s critical that you have an exit strategy. Unless you plan to work until you die, you need to start taking actions NOW for how you’re going to gracefully step out and how you’ll spend your time once you do.

In the last couple of weeks, I’ve had a number of conversations with executives, professionals and business owners (primarily women) who have dreams of life beyond their current circumstances.

They envision being well compensated in a job or business they love, having the respect and credibility from peers, bosses or clients they believe they deserve and having the time and resources to pursue their dreams.

They all, however, were dealing or putting up with circumstances that were literally suffocating their souls, extinguishing their dreams and leaving them feeling exhausted, sad or even worried about their future.

The one thing they each were lacking was – can you guess?…

CONFIDENCE!

At some level, they didn’t feel fully equipped to have their dream life NOW. They felt at the effect of others around them who seemed to hold all of the power.

From my perspective, it seemed there were three key ingredients that, if implemented, would make all the difference in the world.

1. Self-definition
Because it felt to them that others were more powerful than they, that they were unable to truly define, and stand for, who they are and what is important to them.

They felt stuck in the roles they had been given to play and looked longingly toward the future when they would finally be happier.

My advice to them (or you if you find yourself in a similar situation): be true to yourself. This is your life and it won’t last forever. Know what makes you happy and what doesn’t. Don’t buy solely into other people’s dreams and expectations that are counter to who you know yourself to be.

2. Self-determination
Once you’re clear about where you stand, it will be easier to let others know who you are and what you need. Without that, you’ll continue to feel frustrated, hopeless, resigned, depressed and afraid.

My advice to them and you: don’t wait. Be clear and public about your needs and goals NOW. Make requests. Make demands when necessary. Make life go the way YOU want – now.

3. Focused action toward their goals
It’s one thing to dream big, it’s quite another to make those dreams a reality. When you’ve defined yourself and your direction, the path before you will become clear.

It still requires you to take action. Seeing the path and having it in front of you is not the same as walking on the path. Rita Mae Brown defined insanity as “Doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result.”

Action is required. Action builds confidence. Action gets results.

My advice to them and you: Take action. Identify one thing you can do like making a request, taking a class, telling someone “No”, researching your passion or getting help to make it happen. No one can or should try to do any worthy effort alone. And living a big life is definitely a worthy effort.

So what does this have to do with an exit or stay strategy? Start working on your exit strategy now. Don’t wait until ‘the time has come’. You’ll be scrambling then. And it may come sooner than you expect. Plan now. Act now.

Make sure you have a stay strategy that isn’t just going along for the ride. Use your self-definition and self-deterimination to make your current life/career/business more to your liking now. Again, act now.

Your life is in your hands. Make sure you’re living YOUR life, not someone else’s.

Many people think that leaders are born, not made and that if they aren’t officially a Manager, Director, Executive Directory, Vice President, President or CEO, that they are really a leader.

I beg to differ. Leadership is a set of specific behaviors that can be learned.

Here are seven keys I believe are critical to transforming ordinary people into extraordinary leaders.

1. Evoke the emotions of others
True leaders inspire people. They touch their hearts on issues that are important to them. They raise hope while acknowledging and accepting the human frailties we all possess. Leaders make people connect the change they are striving to cause to their own needs and desires.

2. Believe in people
It’s hard for us to see skeptics or critical, negative people as leaders because they don’t do anything proactive to make us feel good about ourselves. On the other hand, leaders see the rough diamonds buried in our hearts and bring them to light so that WE can see them too.

3. Have a compelling vision and be passionate in expressing it
Great leaders see a future that is dramatically different than the present we live in and they don’t keep it a secret. They articulate that future and tell us WHY it’s important that we move toward it. They know they are on the right track even when the rest of the world is still asleep to or in denial about the problem.

4. Never give up but stay flexible
Leaders with big visions are often seen as crack pots or zealots before the masses catch on to the imoportance of their platform. Expect to encounter some resistance at the beginning, but don’t give up on what you believe in. Do however, stay present to new developments and trends and what’s on the minds of the people in your burgeoning ‘tribe’. Find common ground with them an incorporate what you can into your vision, but don’t dilute it too much by trying to please everyone. You won’t.

5. Be an exemplary model
The increased visibility that your leadership will generate will put you in the spotlight. Keep your hands clean. Don’t be tempted by your growing power and influence. Also, don’t avoid leadershp if you have a shady past. If you have truly repented, take ownership for your humanity and mistakes. Share what you’ve learned from your errant ways and promise to stay on the straight and narrow. And then stay there.

6. Demonstrate integrity
Keep your word. Be consistent in your actions. Do what you say you’re going to do. Tell the truth. Make decisions your mother, spouse, children, grandmother would be proud of. Live as though your life will be played out in the media because it might actually end up there.

7. Ask for input and help
Don’t try to get to ‘the promised land’ alone. You can’t. And even if you do, it won’t be very gratifying. As you enroll others in your vision, identify key people in your cause and solicit their opinions and help. The more people you have actively engaged and on the bandwagon with you leading others as well, the easier your road trip will be.

Do these things consistently and you’ll find yourself living a fulfilled life, making a difference and leaving the world in a better place than you found it. That is your purpose so go live it.

It’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind of responding to all of the urgent requests you get. If that’s all you do, you could be putting your livelihood at risk.

Early in my career, I worked at the worldwide headquarters for Kraft Foods as the Corporate Recruiter. The VP of HR gave everyone in the department a token for our desks to remind us how to stay focused.

It displayed 3 simple questions…

1. What’s my job?
You must be clear about what’s expected of you. How are you supposed to spend your time and energy? What are you supposed to do?

People (bosses, employees, clients and vendors) make assumptions about what’s supposed to be done. They often assume that the other person has the same understanding that they do. This is not always the case. It’s critical that you confirm your understanding of your job with your boss or clients.

Be clear. Write down your understanding. Have the review your document and then discuss it.

2. What counts?
Once you have the clarity, the next step is setting priorities. I remember hearing a story about a new senior manager at Apple asking her Director boss if her job was to get things done or make people happy. She knew technically what she was supposed to do – oversee the implementation of all software development projects. She just needed clarity about HOW to go about making that happen.

If trade-offs have to happen, make sure you’re clear about what criteria will be used to make those trade-offs.

3. How am I doing?
This is a great question to ask yourself AND the people you’re delivering your service to. You know if your slacking or not.

You may not know though how well your boss or client think you’re doing.

Better to check in periodically than risk being blinded-sided by the sudden disclosure you’re not measuring up. People are sometimes reluctant to offer negative feedback. So they may just put up with being unhappy until they can’t stand it anymore. Then they fire you when you don’t measure up to their (uncommunicated) standards.

Don’t be caught by surprise. Assess your performance constantly and get feedback from people important to your success to make sure you stay on track.

Great leadership is the display of a combination of tools, skills and behaviors. It isn’t the result of position power or personality. Consequently, it can be learned and demonstrated.

Think of the great leaders you’ve known. I’ll bet they demonstrated most if not all of these skills.

Here’s my list of the top tools, skills and behaviors.

1. Standards
Great leaders set high standards for themselves and the people around them. They expect people to ‘step up’ in ways they may not even believe they can. They require exemplary behavior and thinking. They inspire others to perform at the highest levels possible.

2. Feedback
Honest, authentic communication is the hallmark of a great leader. They are able to express difficult sentiments, communicate expectations and let people know how they are performing vis-a-vis the expectations while leaving those people empowered and ready to forge ahead.

3. Rewards
Rewards are great for creating external motivation for achieving goals. Effective leaders understand the unique values and priorities of the people around them and custom tailor rewards to activate the intrinsic desires that make people perform and excel.

4. Stamp
When great leaders encounter inappropriate behavior, they don’ t stick their head in the sand and ignore it. They stamp it out – quickly and decisively. They are swift in their response to restate expectations and request those expectations be met. This creates and a sense of fairness on the team and credibility for the leader.

5. Care
John C. Maxwell is often quoted as saying, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” When leaders go out of their way to demonstrate their humanity, empathy and concern for others, they create an ultra-strong bond with the people around them.

6. Belief
Great leaders have an unwavering belief in the potential of people. They assume people want to excel and just need pathways, resources and the confidence to express their excellence.

Regardless of where you are in an organization’s hierarchy, you can practice using these tools and behaviors thereby enhancing your effectiveness as a leader.