WARNING: Male readers gird your loins, as you are about to read one of the most horrifyingly nightmarish tales ever to grace the pages of The Patriot Caller.

A 46-year-old man has endured possibly the most painful (physically and emotionally) snakebite in human history, after he was bit on the penis by venomous Levantine viper while casually relieving himself in a field. Ouch.

According to his case, chronicled in the New England Journal of Medicine, the man was rushed to a nearby hospital in Kasmir where doctors luckily had a dose of the proper antivenin.

Upon arrival, the bite victim’s blood was clotting much faster that usual and doctors described that he was “grossly swollen” down there… and covered in fluid-filled blisters.

Two weeks later, doctors declared that the man had made a full recovery, however there was some longterm tissue damage where the snake’s fangs had punctured. Yep.

The only good news here is that this occurred in India… not Indiana.

Snake bites are no laughing matter, even when they come from non-venomous snakes. Even with swift and effective treatment, the hospital bills alone can be excruciation. For example, the California man whose snakebite treatment cost him a whopping $153,161.25!