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Thursday, 28 July 2011

Eating disorders kill

I wasn't sure whether to write about this or not. But I know people who may read this and whom also battle with an eating disorder. But yesterday I had the sad news of a girl that had died because of complications of her anorexia. I knew she was very poorly, and seemed to have little in the way of support. It was only last week we were talking on facebook chat about in-patient support and how it had helped me to get to a better place. I didn't know her very well, we were only connected because she had an eating disorder, buts he was such a sweet sweet girl and didn't deserve to leave this way. She also had a blog. Twenty years old:( what a sad sad loss, she was so young and was doing an open university course. I know she will be grately missed.

It is the shocking reality that eating disorders KILL. I know from being in a very sorry state you never ever think it could happen to you. It was only two years ago that I was in and out on a general ward waiting for a bed at an IP unit and that was the first time it dawned on me that "holy shit, I didn't mean for this to happen". After that moment I chose life.

So I am shouting this out to all who struggle, all who battle to take care of yourself. You only get one life, their is no going back. Recovery is so worth it. I never thought I would be anything but my eating disorder, I never for the life of me thought that I would ever get to go to university or be working and eating what I do now. It has been a struggle at times but so worth it.

Their is no question no pretty picture but to say that those who struggle seek support, their is hope and with hard work their is a life out their for you. I am not claiming to be 100% recovered I am still battling my demons but I believe that one day I will get their.

I knew one girl that lived a block down from me and she was the inspiration for me to get better because when i was sick she had stopped me on my way home and told me that she was worried for me. after i recovered she started slipping back into her ED and her liver failed and she passed away. It was a terrible reality shock for me!

This was an awesome post. It's so sad to see innocent people die from this awful disorder. Luckily I never got so far as to even need to go to inpatient treatment. Recovery has to be a choice though, or it will never be successful. Sure, you can be forced to eat, but mentally the struggle will eventually kill you. It's worth every bit of the pain, fear, and uneasiness to choose to live.