Missing Out, Missing him

Being back at work for over a month now has been hard at times, and by week three I started really missing Charles. Initially, Charles used to be happy to see me and was very excited when I got home, but now that excitement has subsided. He loves his nanny and has built up a strong bond with her. I can't help but feel a little jealous over their relationship and I feel guilty feeling this, but I am very lucky that we have found an amazing woman to look after him, who makes him feel safe and very happy.

Does it make me an ungrateful mother that I try to make Charles prove his love for me, by trying to get him to want to come to me when he is with his nanny, or does it make me ungrateful when I get upset that he is upset because his nanny left? I hope not and I know I need to overcome this.

Since I have been back at work, Charles has started waving, standing and walking. The first time I saw him stand I was super excited, very happy. He looked at me in a strange way and I knew straightaway that my little bugger has stood up before, when I was not around. But nevertheless, it was the first time I saw him do that! He can also walk now, hours of practicing with me and he takes his first few steps when I am at work!

My little boy is growing up and it's ok that I might miss some of his firsts; when I see it myself that will be a first for me!

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