8 things people with depression want their friends to know

1. “I want to hang out with you, I just never have energy.”

A symptom of depression is that it makes you feel exhausted all the time. Some days, it takes everything you have to just get out of bed and brush your teeth.

2. “You can’t fix me.”

Well meaning friends are loved and appreciated when they say they will help you cure your depression. But it doesn’t work like that. Depression isn’t something that can be cured by hanging out, talking, movies, a vacation. These things alleviate it, but don’t get rid of it.

3. “Don’t say ‘get over it’ or ‘move on’.”

If it was that easy, we’d do it. Nobody wants to feel this way and have depression hinder their life. Everything feels like a struggle. We already wish there was a way to get out of this fast.

4. “I’m not being ungrateful.”

Many people bring up that you have nothing to be sad about. You have shelter, food, clothing. So being depressed means you’re being ungrateful. But that’s not true. Depression doesn’t mean you don’t acknowledge your blessings.

5. Sometimes there isn’t a reason

Depression doesn’t always need a reason. These are chemical imbalances in the brain. They can be caused socially or biologically. There are many reasons why someone might get depression or feel depressed. And it doesn’t always have to be an obvious reason that’s qualifies as worthy enough for depression.

6. “Don’t ask me to pray to make it go away.”

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Lots of religious people struggle with depression too! This is an illness like any other. Praying helps some people. But it is not a cure for depression. And it’s insensitive to suggest that it is. It invalidates the very real factors that contribute to depression.

7. “Depression isn’t a choice.”

Nobody chooses to be sad for long periods of time. There is no way to snap out of it. It’s not under people’s control. Don’t suggest that only weak people get depression. It takes a lot of strength to struggle with this illness.

8. “Everyone copes differently.”

Everyone’s experience with depression is different. So if you know a relative or friend cope in one way, you can try and suggest that method for someone else, but it might not work for them. So try not to push a coping mechanism on someone with depression.

It doesn’t hurt to be kind, considerate, and read up on depression when someone you know is struggling with it!