Wednesday, March 21, 2012

5 Reasons Why Goon Is Awesome

Welp, this is scary

Hats off to Soph for pushing me, known movie-hater, to watch Goon because it was fan-freakin-tastic. I'll admit, I had my doubts through the first twenty minutes, but the rest more than made up for it. There's something for everyone: intensity, blood and expletives, a power-ballad-infused romance, the nice guy, the foxy douche, the terrifying bad-ass... Gah, so good!! (And not just because the Highlanders' logo is a total play on the Flyers' one!) Anyway, here are five reasons why I loved it so:

1.) Heart: The motley crew in this film is just so damn likable. Stifler's character Doug (the goon) is super-polite and admits that he's found his niche as an enforcer because he "can protect people." Aww. Watching a "nice guy" navigate this unfamiliar realm of dramaliciousness (ie declaring himself to be a "beer and soup" kind of guy while his teammate does drugs) is refreshing. Doug is surrounded by many other, surprisingly nuanced characters (the grizzled enforcer nearing the end of his career, the failed first round pick, the soon-to-be-divorced team captain, the goalie looking to find his groove, the commitment-phobe girlfriend...) that just reel you right in. Even Jay Baruchel, often obnoxious in this movie, redeems himself when his character gives Doug an impassioned speech about his importance to the Highlanders. Underneath all the blood and expletives is a really enjoyable, character-driven film.

2.) Ross "The Boss" Rhea: Holy shit, the guy from 24/7 is beating the hell out of Stifler?! (And looking like Barry Melrose while doing it?!) Yes. Yes he is. And it is grand. Liev Schreiber brings such calm bad-assitude to this flick, especially when espousing Pops' favorite line: "I don't want to go out like some nancy-boy middle-aged fuck." It's just as good as when Schreiber's intoning profound things like "Lives... so deeply intertwined with what happens in a game..." in 24/7. (btw I think that is my fave scene from 24/7, perhaps because I'm obsessed with "Midnight City now?)

He's the guy you hate but also want to date... Grondin's weirdly magnetic that way, and of course, you start to root for his character as the movie goes on. Goddamn you, irresistible bad boys! Gorgeous face/charm aside, the fact that Grondin says in this old interview that he's not super masculine and yet plays total a total ass/ladies' man in Goon is awesome. This interview is also totes endearing as Grondin describes Laflamme as "a really huge douchebag" and goes on to poke fun at the role. Where has this dude been all my life?!

4.) The locker room speeches: Led by their somewhat misguided greybeard captain, the team gets pumped for games by yelling inappro stuff. Also hilarious is the brown-nosing rookie, who just echoes everything the captain says: "Some of their guys are divorced..." "We're playing divorced guys!" By the end, though, the pre-game speeches do legit tug at the heartstrings: "You guys keep playing long after you've got no reason to!" Oh, if only "This is YOUR time!" could have slipped in for good measure...

5.) The crazy goalie: With his mustache and heavy Canadian accent, it doesn't take much for Halifax goalie "Belchie" to get the laughs. The fact that he says things like, "Pass the dutchie, man!" only helps matters. I daresay he's Soph's favorite character. And, of course, he talks to his goal posts. He too probably thinks the universe is humaaangous big.

In addition to the five aforementioned reasons, Goon also has an awesome soundtrack and is full of little touches that just "get" hockey, you know? (Like the importance of the logo in the locker room, Laflamme always chewing on his mouthguard, the enforcer as a protector that opens up room for the skilled players...) Ahh, love it. Soooo when does it come out on DVD?