The Inner Critic

I’ve just returned from holding a 3 day retreat exploring the differences between Anger and Rage. One of the issues we covered during this event was the Inner Critic, explained below in four stages:

– The Inner Critic and it’s caretaking role in the face of trauma….how it keeps our innocent original self protected from any further aggression or neglect; how it is benevolent as well as aggressive….Donald Kalsched in his book ‘The Inner World of Trauma’ uses the concept of a Daimon to describe it’s benevolent and malevolent nature.

– It’s intensity and ferocity correlates precisely with the intensity and ferocity of the trauma we have suffered. It encapsulates every unprocessed experience of when our environment failed or was hostile. That is why it is more ferocious than any one single event or aggressor that we have encountered.

– How to have what I call a ‘yes but, no but, dialogue’ with it; thank it very sincerely for helping to protect your vulnerable innocent self, for keeping that part of you out of the clutches of further trauma then tell it firmly that ‘the war is over now’, that it is safe for your vulnerable part to emerge because you, Adult you, are willing and able to take care of her/him;

– How, as we process our trauma (as I call it ‘telling the untold stories’ ), the inner critic will quieten exponentially and eventually, for the most part (except at times of high stress or change), will leave us in peace.

If you have any concerns regarding your anger issues then please contact me to discuss how I can help you.