FWIW, if the father of the bride isn't paying for the wedding, you should be able to do it any way you want.

DW and I got married in an art gallery and had the reception for fifty people (no kids) at an adjacent hip restaurant. We hired a main-line jazz band (studio musicians for Ramsey Lewis) and just poured lots of champagne. Many of the guests still send us annaversary cards telling us that that was not only the best wedding they'd ever been to, but also one of the best meals they'd ever had. It's refered to as the first "adult" wedding.