College football is a corrupt and terrifying pastime that masks its flaws by producing an eminently beautiful product year after year. Some of the awfulness is the fault of a deeply flawed system, but it's not hard to find people who deserve to be called out for their egos and errors.

Such is the purpose of the list that follows; as mentioned below, nearly every fanbase (and multiple head coaches and administrators) could be included, but for the sake of brevity we chose to narrow it down to a select few who represent everything that infuriates us about this confounding and arresting sport. After all, college football has already given us the Ten Year War, the Red River Rivalry, "Catholics vs. Convicts" and all manner of SEC truck-nuts swaggery – what better way to get ready for the new season than with some old-fashioned acrimony?