A chronicle of a life of wild abandon and civilized sobriety in Santa Barbara, California

Category Archives: Fashion

You have probably noticed how hipsters can take old, uglyassshit and make it totally sexy. Ref: discarded huge reading glasses worn with confidence, howling wolf sweaters improved with strategic tailoring and the addition of fringe, florescent colors used sparsely paired with neutrals, et cetera.

And my old, uglyass handbag

Totally ugly, very practical, and generally excellent handbag of mine, I adore thee. But damn.

As a life-long appreciator of cinema, clothing, and reasons to drink with friends, I always look forward to the Oscars. This year, The Old Man and I opted to celebrate Hollywood’s Annual Horn-Tootin’ by attending the Oscar party thrown by [my favorite independently-owned shopping haven] The Closet. The lovely ladies of The Closet who are all incredibly nice, hilarious, and adorable goddesses of fashion, had a pre-Oscars champagne and cupcake event in-store. Shoppers were encouraged to fill out Oscar ballots and reconvene at a nearby restaurant / bar to watch the red carpet arrival and award show. Prizes for most accurate ballots and best-dressed were to be awarded at the end of the night.

I am proud to announce that I won!
Everything!
Because I was the only [non-employee] attendee!
HORRAY FOR ABSOLUTE VICTORY BY DEFAULT!

Actually, I won almost everything. Because another group of three Oscar-watchers sat near us and joined in on the ballot action. And totally kicked my ass. Luckily, there was only one woman in their group, so she was the only eligible contestant and walked away with one of the three gift certificates. I made off with two. BOOM: $30 shopping sprizzle. Also, I should make clear that I was the only female attendee. The Old Man was also present. Surrounded by five of us designer-dress-drooling-oogling dames. He wins the prize for best husband in a supporting role.

I had so much fun. And I am very much looking forward to The Closet’s next cinematic event… WATCHING THE TITANIC IN 3-D on April 4th!!! Anyone reading this blog should plan on coming along. The girls are seriously so cool, and how can you not want to re-see TITANIC?! That was Leo at his beautifullest. I will keep you posted on news for this event, or you can become a fan of The Closet on Facebook and keep up to date that way. https://www.facebook.com/theclosettradingco

And since I am a blogger who wants to learn new and exciting blogger skills, I took this opportunity to get to know my Photoshop. Look what I made!

It’s my first attempt at anything Photoshop, and I know it’s pretty rough, but damn it feels good to be a Photoshop-literate gansta.

The above collage represents a few of the notable dresses by notable designers on notable ladies at the Oscars / after parties. Honorable mention goes to Viola Davis in Vera Wang.

And Kristen Wiig in J. Mendel

And Octavia Spencer in Tadashi

Horray for new skills! Photoshopping stuff It takes so much time! Why are there fingers growing out of Berenice Bejo’s hip?! The type is too little! So much more to learn!

I have never been particularly in charge of my hair. It pretty much does what it wants and tells me to suck an egg, which I sadly have had to do UNTIL NOW.

Because of the wonder that is the boar’s bristle hair brush, my hair is now my bitch.

If you are a woman and you do not own a boar’s bristle hair brush, buy one this instant. I paid $9 for mine. They’re not so good for detangling (unless you buy the combo nylon / boar’s hair, which I have not tried), but they are killer for smoothing hair and de-frizzing hair during blow drying. Apparently the boar’s hair bristle redistributes your hair’s natural oils in order to keep everything even and glossy. Even if you are a naturally super dark brunette who has gone platinum (me), and thought there was no way your hair could ever look smooth, YES, even you can have glossy smooth hair.

In other hair news, I have been growing mine out. Which means it has been quite the disaster (besides all the silky glossiness, of course) with split ends, no shape, and that weird can’t-do-nothing length. But, in hopeful anticipation, I spent some of today browsing the interweb for inspiration for what to do with it when it is no longer weird.

See hair design culled from the pages of the Harper’s Bazaar website:

The ponytail you TOTALLY WANTED in second grade. Seen at Herve Leger.

Excellent use of hairpins at Phillip Lim.

Radical feather use at Jason Wu. (Wooo!)

The simple, classy, stylish loose ponytail tied with a ribbon.

Twisty spinny pinned up coolness. Seen on Giorgio Armani's models.

Order in chaos braid: Michael Kors.

...yeah not this one. I had to include this photo because this model has an eerie resemblance to my 6th grade gender-confused school teacher. (Her hair never looked this groomed.)

If you have any incredible and simple hair tips to share with the world, please leave a comment!

As you might imagine, with only SEVEN DAYS UNTIL LIFTOFF, I am finding it difficult to think about anything other than Ireland or Spain. I am SO EXCITED!!! Even agonizing over the maddening details like deciding what gifts to bring to our family in Ireland (perhaps wine? but what if they don’t like wine? a dolphin wood carving? maybe something more Catholic-y? … wine it is!) is somehow very satisfying. My mind is chewing and savoring and digesting the fact that we are finally going.

By far, the most enjoyable brain fodder for me has been deciding what to wear. Although admittedly this is causing me some anxiety being that Ireland is supposed to be rainy and chilly – I believe 59 degrees or so on average, and Spain is supposed to be sunny and hot – 80 degrees or so. Packing for two very different climates in one very limited bag may prove to make me crazy insane-o, but I swear to GOD I will be a well-dressed crazy insane-o.

So here is my solution: See Spain wardrobe below:

How nice of me and the rest of my identical octuplets to try on all of these outfits to take a picture. You’re welcome. (Side note: I am pretty positive that this model is the actress who plays ONE of the women Don Draper sleeps with in season three of Mad Men. The teacher. Am I right?)

Anyway. My octuplet sisters and I are modeling part of Heidi Merrick’s Spring 2012 collection. I feel that bright colors will work well to both enliven the drizzly atmosphere of the one, and reflect the vibrancy of the other. Also, although some of these outfits are decidedly Spainy, most of them could easily be made Irelandy. Throw some cozy leggings on underneath some of those, add tall black water-friendly riding boots, a scarf, and a coat and wha-blam! Irelandy. So although I do not own any pieces from Heidi Merrick’s Spring 2012 collection (YET!) I am trying to build a travel wardrobe with outfits like this. Key words and phrases: versatility, simplicity, chose a color palette and stick with it, layers, comfort, and leave some room in the bag for NEW items of clothing.

How will our cats will fare without constant adoration? When exactly should I take my Advil PM on the flight across the Atlantic to minimize jet lag? Is our landlord really going to renovate our bathroom while we’re gone? (Crossing fingers for an affirmative answer on that one.) Will we be able to catch up on Dexter on the iPad during our travels? Is it wrong to wear Spring 2012 when it’s only Fall 2011? All these worries will soon subside as the old man and I inch ever closer to our precious sixteen days of cold Irish beer in warm Irish pubs, and cool Spanish sangria on hot Spanish terraces, perfectly attired and mutually admired.