I am 26 freakin years old. Surely i am not suppose to be head over heels for a girl that isnt into me. I dont know for a fact she isnt into me but she sure as heck doesnt show it. Having low self esteem always makes it that more difficult.

^^^most people aren't "head over heels" when they first meet. One is usually smitten and the other must eventually come around. It could take days / weeks and for others it takes years.

Trust me, low self esteem should't have much to do with this. Just be yourself, do something a little outside your "normal" and most of all, be patient!

Well the thing is this isnt the first time.. but it is the first time in a long time.
I met this girl 4 years ago and we saw each other for 3 "dates". I had a few weird run ins with her over the 4 years, some were heavily intoxicated the other was sober and seeing her on the bus every morning for a year and never saying hello to her. I have never been so attracted to someone before where it turns me into someone else . It was like meeting a Drew Barrymore in The Wedding Singer or some sort of Zooey Deschenel character.
I think what i did last time and am starting to feel like do again is back away completely because i feel i am more into her than she is with me and that its a bit of a weirdo/creeper kind of thing.

You are close to half my age. I understand things may be a little different these days when it comes to getting recognized. However, there is something a little "creeper" about riding the bus with someone you've had multiple dates with and not saying hello for an entire year. It's hard to back away when you choose not to speak......guess you could always catch a earlier / later bus.

My suggestion would be a simple hello or good morning. If she responds or smiles, ask how she is doing. Then in later days, she if she is ever the first to speak. If she does, maybe ask about grabbing a coffee when ya'll get off the bus.

You are close to half my age. I understand things may be a little different these days when it comes to getting recognized. However, there is something a little "creeper" about riding the bus with someone you've had multiple dates with and not saying hello for an entire year. It's hard to back away when you choose not to speak......guess you could always catch a earlier / later bus.

My suggestion would be a simple hello or good morning. If she responds or smiles, ask how she is doing. Then in later days, she if she is ever the first to speak. If she does, maybe ask about grabbing a coffee when ya'll get off the bus.

Sorry i was not very clear. I rode this bus with her last year. I ran into her a few months ago whilst heavily intoxicated on alcohol and assorted uppers. I proceeded to tell her about the dreams and my feelings towards her ie. everything!

A few weeks ago she messaged me asking me out to get a drink and play some cards. I never expected such a thing to happen.

Sorry i was not very clear. I rode this bus with her last year. I ran into her a few months ago whilst heavily intoxicated on alcohol and assorted uppers. I proceeded to tell her about the dreams and my feelings towards her ie. everything!

A few weeks ago she messaged me asking me out to get a drink and play some cards. I never expected such a thing to happen.

i don't get it why you are so surprised when someone likes you. i'm not saying this as a compliment or anything, but people are attracted to others, and sometimes it will be you they like, whether it's some girl you used to like, or an old man you met on a train, or your friend's girlfriend, or whatever, just like you will be attracted to other random people. just because stuff is unexpected doesn't mean you have to avoid it. i guess there's always a certain amount of tension that will go with it but that's just life.

i don't get it why you are so surprised when someone likes you. i'm not saying this as a compliment or anything, but people are attracted to others, and sometimes it will be you they like, whether it's some girl you used to like, or an old man you met on a train, or your friend's girlfriend, or whatever, just like you will be attracted to other random people. just because stuff is unexpected doesn't mean you have to avoid it. i guess there's always a certain amount of tension that will go with it but that's just life.

I tend to question everything a lot and relationships arent excluded.
I always want to know whats happening in other peoples heads I guess for comfort in my own head.

I am more so whinging that i dont think she does like me. She is so hard to understand. I am just being impatient but i cant help it, she is so damn cute.

ANYWAY enough about that

I sliced up a jam i had a few months ago with a friend of mine and put it up on SoundCloud for a friend of mine to listen to but i figure i could share it here also.

Its all on the spot and we were pretty drunk throughout the 4 or 5 hours we played. Its mostly shit but has some parts i like.

I need help...someone who I used to go to primary school with has just messaged me out of nowhere at 2 in the morning saying "oh hey". what the fuck is this? have not spoken to her in any capacity for like a decade outside of a few similarly awkward facebook encounters...so how do I reply to this? can I ignore it? I'm amoral, yeah, but as a white person I have to keep up the artifice of kindness, but then again the girl is a fucking loon (used to think a tree was a sentient being and that if you made bracelets out of grass you could communicate internationally).......

I need help...someone who I used to go to primary school with has just messaged me out of nowhere at 2 in the morning saying "oh hey". what the fuck is this? have not spoken to her in any capacity for like a decade outside of a few similarly awkward facebook encounters...so how do I reply to this? can I ignore it? I'm amoral, yeah, but as a white person I have to keep up the artifice of kindness, but then again the girl is a fucking loon (used to think a tree was a sentient being and that if you made bracelets out of grass you could communicate internationally).......