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Notes from the Pool Cabana: 49ers Reach Their Ceiling

"I was just settling down to watch the horrible 49er game on Sunday when a meteor crashed into a deserted pasture somewhere above my house and all the lights went out." Hunter S. Thompson. Hey Rube. January 13, 2003.

Sometimes people ask me why I like sports so much, especially because I’m old and broken and not on the field. What’s the point of watching if you’re not playing?

There are degrees of the absurd you must deal with as a fan, especially a football junkie. Essentially, I’m cheering for a logo and for coaches I don’t know, calling plays in a language I’m only beginning to understand. The players are at such a level of human achievement, that 99-percent of fans at the stadium couldn’t even play catch with an NFL quarterback.

Yet, what makes sports good is the unknown. Pick a sports day, find a match up and you’ll find odds. And on any of those games, you’ll find a team defying what seemed like the insurmountable. And that’s what I’m hoping for each Sunday.

But this year’s San Francisco 49ers are not a team to defy those odds. We did see them compete today, but this not a team built or coached to flow against the Great Magnet. Organizations mired in dysfunction, obsessed with press leaks and junior high rumors don’t win and rarely compete.

When the 4th quarter clock hits zero, the 49ers fan looks who to blame for the loss. Yes, today you can blame a player. You could blame the defense, which gave up 376 yards in the air, but oddly enough, held Arizona to 80 yards on the ground and created some key turnovers.

Chip Kelly and his staff continue to be poor coaches, despite calling a surprise naked bootleg on Kaepenick’s rushing touchdown. Kind of amazing what happens when you use the element of surprise to your advantage.

But, one play does not make a team shed it’s dysfunctional skin.

Maybe this game is a good lesson for fans. A teachable moment for us showing that this team reached its apex today, but Kelly lacks any ability to coach when things get competitive.

But 49ers fans are stubborn creatures and will probably find out our quarterback puts his left shoe on before his right, and direct their anger in the wrong place.

Next week, the 49ers face a real team, with a junta-disciplined coaching staff that’s going to devise a professional game plan to dismantle the 49ers. Chip Kelly will leave the field confused, wondering how Josh McDaniels has such a high-powered offense, yet never calls zone-reads or run-pass option plays. Jim O’Neill shouldn’t even be in the same building as Bill Belichick or Matt Patricia.

And Jed. Poor Jed. You've failed to build an organization like the Patriots - which is Jed's ultimate goal - and you've failed to build your pool cabana. But, be proud. You've done it all with class.