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I know i have to get away... but..

I know this is bad , but I really need help. My boyfriend has been looking up some things online that has been scaring me.. just like very young porn... even looking up (preteen models) and i know he has been masterbating to the young girls just in shorts, skirts and swimsuits... I dont know how to bring it up to him, because we have a baby together he is little over 12 months... i havent been able to sleep with him since i found this out, but he hasn't really been trying anyway... i dont want to fight around a baby, i dont want him to freak out and leave, because i am pregnant again... and about to have his second child... (36 weeks)... I know it sounds stupid that i can't bring it up. We live together also, and i know i wont be able to afford my own place right now with this baby along the way... any advice?

Stay in a shelter or with family members for awhile. If he is looking at child porn, the authorities will find out and your son will see the police taking him to jail. This is not a good situation to be in and until he gets help, you need to get you and your son out of there. I know a family that is going to court for their son who looked at girl porn and started molesting girls and boys. Get you and your son out of there.

Answer by
Anonymous
at 12:59 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

What is going on with this guy is potentially illegal. Do you have family or something that could help you? You are right. You need a way out

If you have a girl, do you know what that could mean for her? I wish I could give you the advice that would save you from the situation, but all I can really say is that pediphilia is a sickness, and if at all possible you must urge him to go seek help before he acts on his feelings and harms a young girl.

Why is it okay for a 19 yr old girl to marry an 80 year old man and still walk the street with her head held high? Because we live in a society where stupidity runs rampant. Never have children until you are protected legally and he has commited to you through marriage. Porn is off limits when you are married because it's a form of cheating and he needs to be having sex with you. If your boyfriend is masterbating he has completely missed the point of having a girlfriend. Sounds to me like you could benefit from a strong dose of self respect. Why so many young women are completely unable to learn from the mistakes of those who came before them is a mystery to me. No amount of advice is going to dig you out of the mess you've already made by having children with this guy. Now you're a single mom who can't work who is trapped with a sex freak who will irritate you for the rest of your life. Nice going.

Answer by
Anonymous
at 1:28 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

report the kiddie porn and you won't have any custody issues. so you need to leave, because he could be thinking of your lo's that way. don't endanger your children! it is good that you aren't legally commited because now he has no rights as a husband! no judge will give that man anything, there is no mercy for those involved with kiddie porn. you have every right to walk away, do it now before your children are too attatched and they have to go through life knowing that their dad is a pedophile. you need someone who will respect you and YOUR kids, what he is doing is totally disrespectful and illegal. how dare he bring that into your home!

I was thinking the same thing as pnkrcklvr - if you are having a girl, are you really willing to have her in that situation??? If you KNOW he is doing these things, you need to do what you have to do to protect your children. It may not be easy and you might have to rely on others for a while, but your children are your first priority. I definitely would report him. Forget confronting him about it - he'll either deny it or turn it around and accuse you of spying or not trusting him or whatever. Report him, take evidence if you can, and he will NOT be allowed to be around your (OR ANY OTHER) children. PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN!!! They need their mother to make the right decisions!!!!!

I work for a company with men who are pedophiles. Let me tell you 1 thing right now! And you listen to me okay? You are not married right now! I would get out of it as soon as you can. Knowing that he's interested is already the first sigh. My friends dad did this growing up, and then once it was too late he was sniffing their underwear, masturbating in them, it even got to the point where he would watch then go to the bathroom and watch then take their baths. It's bad and they typically never get over this certain kind of illness. I would keep a close eye on the internet. Go to Google and type in every letter on the key board so it shows what has been searched. Because that's what he's interested in. Do not accuse!!! As hard as it will be! Get facts and stick with them. Also as your kids grow into teens, just think he may threaten them to get what he wants, my friends dad sneaked into her room once, and also had revealed him.

Answer by
Anonymous
at 3:43 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

If it were me I would not confront him-- cause then he could clear the computer and get rid of the evidence, and then lie to me about it. I would contact the police and turn him in, and then I would call a lawyer and start the ball rolling for sole custody of the children (and child support--- if he is still able to work). Then I would either change the locks so he can't get back in the home, or I would pack up mine and the childrens things and move out. I would NEVER stay with someone who wacked off looking at underage kids or was into kiddie porn! That is just sick, and he could turn that on your children someday!

Answer by
Anonymous
at 9:25 AM on Jun. 21, 2010

I don't get why you can't talk to him or just up and leave him? What he is doing is illegal and perverted. Do you honestly want to raise your children with a pedophile? I would think you'd have left skidmarks out the door already.

All I can say is pregnant or not, get your ducks in a row and get the hell away from him. He'd be lucky I didn't turn him in!!