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Merry Freakin’ Ho-Ho

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Anyone who knows me know that I’ve never been that big on the whole Christmas thing. I don’t get excited this time of year and definitely don’t feel a need to be joyful, artificial or not.

I’m not knocking anyone who loves this time of year.. in fact several of my close friends absolutely LOVE Christmas, and I think it’s great they get so excited about it, regardless of how old they are or how they spend it. I am genuinely happy for them when I hear how they’ve spent the day with family or friends.

Me, I’m just a bit more ‘meh’ about it all.

I think a lot of it has to do with how I’ve spend many a Christmas alone or working, and I think in the past 15 years I’ve probably only spent about 3 or 4 of them with my family. It was never an easy thing to be able to go home for the holiday period, partly because of finances but also about having the time off.

This year I do have the week between Christmas and New Year’s off work, but I haven’t gotten anything planned to be honest. In fact, I think I’m just going to enjoy the day to myself, relax, make myself a nice meal, and watch the Christmas specials on the telly (am mostly looking forward to the Christmas Day episodes of Doctor Who and Downton Abbey lol).

Would it be nice to have some company on Christmas Day? Sure it would, nobody likes to be alone on that day. But at the same time I don’t feel the need to spend it with people just so I’m not by myself that day. To me that would feel forced and not exactly special.. and I’ve done that more than enough times in the past to know it’s not how I’d like to spend the day so I’ve chosen to spend the day by myself to relax.

I don’t feel down or sad about it at all.. of course that may change on the actual day. LOL

Of course it would be great if I could spend the day with my family, but now that I’m living in London it’s a bit hard since it’s so expensive to fly back to Canada at this time of year. Since I moved here in 2008 I’ve only been home for Christmas once back in 2011.

And after the year I’ve had, the last thing I could afford is a flight home.

It was terrific to see my family and spend time with them over the almost 2 weeks I spent there (minus the couple days I spent in Montreal over New Year’s). The older I get the more I wish I could see them more, but at the same time I need to live my life.

But I think what made that visit so special is how we kept it a secret that I was coming to visit, with only my dad and my younger sister knowing that I was coming (they were meeting me at the airport after all). I’ll never forget the look on my mum’s face when she saw me sitting in my sister’s living room as I wished her a ‘Merry Christmas’.. she was completely shocked and once she almost bowled me over to give me a hug, she didn’t let me go for ages.

It was so sweet that we could give her that surprise for Christmas, especially after she’d sent me a message on Facebook just that morning wishing I could be there with them. This year however will just be the usual chat on Skype once my parents get to my sister’s house.

Anyway, I guess the crux of it is I just don’t see the point getting worked up over that day.. I’m not religious so have never seen it as a religious holiday, and I don’t have any burning desire to spend loads of money on too much food or crap I don’t need. Hell, I rarely exchange gifts with anyone, mostly because I think if someone is truly that special to you why should you wait for that day to give them something special?