Seemed okay so I kept moving furniture but then I checked it out in the elevator. Not so nice! Back upstairs, I pulled my pants around my ankles in front of my boss and her boyfriend. They had no ice in the freezer just a big bottle of vodka, It'd have to do. I sat in their Hammacher-Shlemmer massage chair in my underwear with a huge bottle of vodka on my leg and tried not to pass out.

No no, don't. The Bible says not to covet thy neighbor's life. Try and resist that urge. I know it's hard. What can I say?