Who wants a possibly washed-up wide receiver on the wrong side of 35 and still carrying plenty of baggage? Burress didn't actually have a bad season with the Jets, his first post-prison. It was just underwhelming, with major drops in catches, yards and scores—and football players are not one of those things you can expect to get better with age.

Burress may have to settle for a deal mostly made up of incentives this season, and we can't think of a team better suited to take a flyer than the Panthers. They've got their franchise QB, but not much in the way of targets, especially after the departure of Legedu Naanee. And Burress already declared himself all aboard the Cam Newton train. In an interview with a local radio station, Burress was asked if Carolina was his preferred destination:

"No doubt about it. My brother lives right there in Charlotte, my cousin lives there in Charlotte and all my family is there in Columbia, South Carolina. It would just be a great situation all the way around and being close to everybody. Not just that but playing with Cam who I think is one of the top five quarterbacks in all of football and as long as I can remember Steve Smith has been one of my favorites. I just think it's a great situation."

Slow your roll. A Panthers team official, though anonymous, wants to make it clear that the team has no interest in signing Burress. Why not is anyone's guess, as there seems to be no downside to giving him a low-risk contract. Beyond, of course, the retarded development of younger wideouts, or fears of piercing Cam Newton's hermetically sealed trouble bubble. Which are two pretty good reasons, actually.