Thursday, January 21, 2010

Notes from the Field XX

Becoming a Grown Up

Pretty much anyone who has ever read a number of folk, and/or fairytales can tell you the same thing – two parent homes are in short supply in storyland. Cinderella, Hansel and Gretel, Snow White, and many far less known heroes and heroines were missing at least one parent. Scholars write that this loss of a mother or a father in stories represents the coming of age of a child, a new beginning and era for them. A time when the people who had guided them were now gone, leaving them as the leaders, the decision makers, in short, the grown-ups. Once again, the ancients who told, than wrote these timeless tales, had figured out, and expressed, something modern man thinks he (or she) is only now discovering. Namely, to quote I don’t remember who, but somebody who said, “No matter how old a person is, they are not a grown up, until they have lost a parent.”

I began thinking of my parent’s mortality about 12 years ago, when my father had the first of several strokes. Over night, or so it seemed to me, my dad went from hale and healthy, and permanently middle-aged, to sickly, frail, and a senior citizen. My mother, strong, and as full of life force as her mother (who lived into her 90’s) had been, took on an “elderly” look to me as well. But, in my life, since the time I was fourteen, there was another “parent” around, Mr. Gus Dick Andros – ballet teacher extraordinaire. Six weeks younger than my real dad, Mr. A (or Sir to his face, and the Old Man, behind his back)was “that” teacher to me. You know, the one who sees in you, what nobody else guessed was there, the one who believes in you, even before you believe in yourself, the one who’s approval comes to mean so very much to you, that you break your back to do them proud – Mr. A was that to me. In story-speak he was the wise man that the heroine meets at the side of the road while she is wandering lost. It’s he, who puts her on the right path, and gives her a gift that will take her far.

As my ballet teacher at the High School of Performing Arts I saw him five days a week, and hung on his every word and correction. His tricky combinations of steps fired up my brain, and taught me that I could pick up steps faster than most anyone else around me. I knew I wasn’t the best dancer in the room, not even close, but Mr. A rewarded my love of dance and performing, as well as my hard work, and discipline, and told stories of a dance world that was broader than just the classical ballet island I was obsessed by. He opened my eyes to what being a professional performer was really all about, and encouraged me to take the leap, and go for it.

All through my high school years, I studied with him during school hours, and weekends and evenings, too. And, after graduation, that pattern continued, if I wasn’t off performing, or in a rehearsal, I was in his class, day after day, week after week, year after year, literally growing up there. He would jokily refer to me as his daughter, and he even once told a HUGE lie to an old high school girlfriend, saying that I was his illegitimate child – a product of an affair he had with another dancer while he was doing a production of the musical “Showboat”! But, unlike my birth parents, Mr. A, didn’t seem to grow old to me. My dad would shake his head in wonder as I would proudly tell him that Mr. A, at 60, 70, and 80 was still doing what he loved more than anything – teaching ballet. Sure, he used a cane, now, and he said during the weekends all he did was sleep, but, like a child – like his child, I didn’t see that the end of his story was looming. When his diagnosis of acute leukemia came in mid-October, I remember feeling like my stomach dropped into my feet, followed by a big old blanket of denial and disbelief. It was only in the last two weeks of his life last month that I really and truly felt that he was actually dying.

And so I find myself, like all those characters who tales I recount time and time again, starting off on a path without my guiding force at my side, without that sense of home, devoid of that someone who would ALWAYS welcome me, and love me when I walked in their door. I find myself, my own leader, my own wise woman, I find myself, at long last, a grown-up.

2 comments:

Julie-This post left me speechless. You reached inside my own mind and plucked out my very thoughts. I am writing a memoir about this exact sentiment. Until my mother drew her last breath-I did not REALLY know what it felt like to be a grown up. I can't tell you enough how therapeutic it is to find you. Here is a hug for your loss...know there is at least one other woman out there who knows, it is not until you loose a parent that the world of grown up becomes real. Bless you-

Julie's Bio

Julie Pasqual is a storyteller who's performances are infused with physicality and movement from her dance training, comic moments from her work in clowning, a deep love of language from her work as an actress, and a love of world cultures and folktales born from her travels to (so far) 49 of the 50 states, and 12 countries. Using all of her performance skills, and an ever present spirit of playfulness, Julie brings stories to audiences from pre-schoolers to prisoners, and everyone in between in single shows, assemblies, workshops, and residencies. Schools, libraries, festivals, museums, group homes, shelters, detention centers, and even weddings, have been some of her venues. When not telling tales, she can be found performing for Healthy Humor, a program designed to bring joy and fun to hospitalized children and their families, teaching the ancient practice of yoga at several studios, and domestic abuse shelters, and travelling to international schools around the globe as a teaching artist for ISTA (International School Theatre Alliance, as well as sweating as much as she can at her local gym!!!

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Upcoming Performances

Many of my “tellings” are private performances for schools, or part of ongoing residencies I have. The following are some venues where the general public can see me. Hope to see you there!!FEBRUARY 2017:2/4/17: Hempstead Library, NY 2PM2/4/17: Battery Park City, NYC 4:30PM2/25/17: Rahway Library, NJ 2PMAPRIL 2017:4/29/17: CT Storytelling Festival, New London, CT, 9AM, 1:30, 7:30!!MAY 2017:Manasquan Library, NJ 3:15PM

SO, WHERE'S JULIE WHEN SHE'S NOT TELLING TALES??

Well, she might be...performing in hospitals for children and their families for Healthy Humor a program designed to bringing humor and joy to the pediatric patients, or she might be...teaching yoga at Hudson Yoga Project in Hoboken, NJ, Yogamaya, The Bhakti Center, or at homeless and women's shelters in NYC. Or she might be...stilt walking, clowning, or dancing at various events. Or she might be travelling as a teaching artist for ISTA (International School Theatre Alliance)

Julie Live!

What They're Saying about Julie!

Julie Pasqual brings stories to LIFE. She is a storyteller of the first magnitude, with a collection of tales from all over the world. If you have the mistaken impression that children are bored by traditional storytelling, Julie will, with one beat of a drum, dance of her feet, or participatory shout from the audience, dispel your reservations. Julie is a true griot, a tribal teller who carries stories forward so that current generation and generations to come can learn the stories and the art of the teller. I have never had Julie at the library when the audience didn't leave smiling from ear to ear and repeating the rhythms and stories that she has taught them.

From Lisa Herskowitz, Youth Services Librarian, East Northport, Public Library.

"Julie Pasqual is one of the best storytellers we have hosted at our library. Julie is a whirlwind of positive energy who knows how to work a room filled with children of varied ages as well as adults. Her performance, which was the perfect blend of humor, physicality, and poignancy, held everyone's attention. Everyone walked out with a smile! I look forward to inviting Julie back in the near future."

To whom it may concern,

Julie Pasqual is a truly amazing performer! From the minute she steps on stage – even if the stage is a respect commanding school chapel or a huge, undecorated school gym – she holds the audience spellbound. Because Dream On Productions has presented more than 40 performances in Argentina by this excellent storyteller, I was treated to a wide variety of tales. My favorite one is “Unana,” a traditional folktale where the mother goes after an elephant who ate her children, and has to be swallowed along with them in order to rescue them. I also love the story of Death and her godson, a story told in cultures throughout the world. Her stories, her voices, her facial expressions, her stage presence make her performances unforgettable.

The fact that she uses the whole of her body to convey emotions and images that get the idea across makes her unique among the excellent performers we normally schedule, and perfect for our audiences of ESL learners.

Julie is furthermore a joy to work with and makes the entire experience not only a delight for the audience but also for the tour organizers. Just to mention a couple of examples, she was most co-operative trying to resolve an issue with a flight schedule change by the airline, and very patient signing autographs for long lines of school children.

In addition to my own opinion expressed above, we have received much feedback thanking Dream On and Julie, full of positive comments from teachers and children. As director of Dream On Productions, I heartily recommend her storytelling skills and professionalism.