Dr. Dolores Jean Wells left me on May 12th 2013

by Dr. Dolores J. Wells
(Tampa Florida U.S.A.)

If you knew her, this was her world

My soulmate, Dr. Dolores Jean Wells, of 10 yrs. left me on May 12th, 2013 from breast cancer. She was my whole world. I woke up for her, i went thru my day for her and there was not one time we had an argument in the entire time together. It is so hard to keep going and i am doing it alone at that. She battled cancer for 19 months, and thank God she went quickly with no pain, but the realization that she has left is just so overwhelming. It has been over a month now and it's harder now than when she passed. I did have her at home when she passed, which for her was nice. There are so many sites telling you what to do and expect that it makes it harder reading them. I am just lost. I do believe in Jesus, and i know she is in a far better place than we are, but the pain just deepens knowing she'll never laugh at another one of my jokes. I have so much to say but again i have nothing to say. Good Bye My Love, You are missed more than words can say. I Love You- Good Bye

Comments for Dr. Dolores Jean Wells left me on May 12th 2013

I know what you are going through...I lost my wife, of almost 19 years on 11/14/12...She died of Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis (Scarring of the Lungs)...She was my life & my soul-mate!!! People tell me that time heals!! For me, it has been over 7 months & it has not gotten any easier...I miss her tremendously so!! I know that she is in a much better place, but, I also will never share another precious moment with her, nor will she with me...I cannot see myself, with anyone else because, she was & will always be my true love!! You see, I had been married previously & it ended in a bitter divorce after 10 years...I was extremely fortunate that I found my "Beloved Aimee" after that...We never had any children nor did I have any children from my first marriage...Therefore, I feel totally alone...I know that one day, I will see her and I can hardly wait!! I can almost imagine her saying to me, "What kept you, I have been waiting for you"!!! Anyway, I really feel for you, just like your spouse was the love of "Your" life; My Aimee was the love of "My" Life...

Jun 21, 2013

Dr.Dolores Jean Wells left meby: silver

May and June are hard months for me.In May there is mothers day,my anniversary(it would have been 35 yrs on the 22nd)the 3rd anniversary of my dear friend of 28 yrs.and the 2nd anniversary of my dear husband's death.June has father's day(died Dec'09)and the 3rd anniversary of my mothers death(died June 30,'10.I sent my mother,father,friend,and husband on within 17 months.As hard as it was for each of the other deaths,nothing prepared me for my husband leaving.I wondered why my mother just quit living after my father died and she died 7 months later.I found out when 11 months later my love left me.It has been 2 yrs now.I still cry often but not as hard or as long.I am beginning to go out of the house at least once a week + church on Sunday.I was in the process of losing weight(almost 50 lbs)when he died and in my depression I became a compulsive eater of "good mood food".I gained back 30 lbs of it.I am walking every day now and increasing the distance each week.I have lost 5 lbs and will keep working on it.I know how you feel.I still feel lost often.There is no one beside me when I go to bed or when I wake up.There is no one to come home to.No one to talk to or laugh with.No one to go somewhere with me.No one to listen.I find it ironic that my husband had the TV on all the time which I couldn't understand but now I have it on often just to hear people talking.Feel happy that you were able to do things for her,it gives you some memories to hold onto.That's what helps me.That & my faith in GOD.If I didn't have that I would have crumbled long ago.I pray each night for GOD to give me and others like me the strength to go on.Poetry has helped me some.Many of us have posted poems of our loved ones and the emotions we are going through.I have read a lot of them and kept some of them to read when I begin to forget that my love is safe and at peace now.I hold onto the fact that I will see him again one day.I send you love and caring and a prayer for some peace.As my love used to say,"It never goes away but it does get better."May this be for you

Jun 15, 2013

Thank You Allby: David

Thank you all for your heart felt words and thoughts. I know every minute someone loses someone they love, but when it's you, you just don't think about the others as much. I am so sorry for all your losses, but God does tell us "That to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord". Right now that's all that's keeping me going along with her Strengh. She dealt with so much, and i am glad the pain is finally gone for her. I know it has only been a month since her passing, but she lost her Uncle in '06, her mother in Dec.'07, a boy who she treated as a son in '07 who she found dead, her step father in '08, her dog of 15 yrs. in '08 and if that wasn't enough, she found her only child, her son, dead of a drug overdose at age 26 on June 28th 2008. That was the day she died. The women i knew left that day and never came back. Since then she has just been going through the paces of life. She cried everyday with the loss of her son, and in 2011 life was getting a little easier for her, the tears came less, when in Nov. she was diagnosed with Triple Negative Stage 4 Metastatic Breast Cancer. (In Dec. 2010 her mammogram came back clean by the way) Enough is Enough!!!! I have known her since 2001, and i just could not believe that this women just kept going and going. We have been together since '03 and for ALL the bad that happened i would not take away one minute that we spent together. As you said, cherish the times we had together, and i do and i think of them every day. She battled that Horrible sickness to the very end. It was only her and me through 19 months of Hell dealing with her sickness. She is my HERO, My BEST FRIEND, and the Women I Love. I felt so helpless through all her losses, and when she was diagnosed with cancer, i tried to do everything i possibly could to make every moment of her life worth while, if that was even possible? I even bought her a "Heated Toilet Seat", really, she loved it!! At the end she would not use the portable toilet because the seat was cold, so i put a heating pad on it to keep it warm. It worked. Those were just some of the crazy little things i would do to make her happy. I just hope that through it all she did have some happiness. Thank You for letting me vent. As i said, i have no one and this is not an easy thing to handle. But for ALL SHE WENT THROUGH, i'm sure not giving up! Again, Thank You All and God Bless You

Jun 15, 2013

Sympathyby: Lawrence

What can I add to Doreen's comments, she has described how everyone on this site is feeling, the anguish and tears and the feeling life is not worth living without the person we loved more than life itself.I am into my sixth month since my beloved wife died and still can't stop crying spontaneously without any warning which can be very embarrassing but after nearly seventy years as a couple I still feel bereft and terribly lonely without her.As I say on every contribution” GRIEF IS THE PRICE YOU PAY FOR HAPPINESS”,I know it is no consolation but be thankful for the few years you had, I certainly am.Take care of yourself; we are all praying for you Lawrence

Jun 15, 2013

Dr. Dolores Jean Wellsby: Pat J.Green Bay,WI

I am so sorry for your loss. It will be 2 years on June 27th, that I lost the love of my life. We were married 46 years on June 26, 2011. He died from a massive heart attack, at 12:10 a.m. on June 27th. You are in the early stages of your grief. There isn't a time limit on your grief. Take it one day at a time and be good to yourself. Put yourself first; do what makes you feel good. My faith is what has helped me each and everyday. I have been blessed with signs from my husband. I am told they are always there. We just have to really look for them. We never really get over their death; we just slowly learn how to live without them.

Jun 15, 2013

Dr. Dolores Jean Wells left me on May 12th 2013by: Doreen U.K.

I am sorry for your loss of a beloved soul mate partner. It has only been one month and far too early to expect to feel anything different.I lost my beloved husband of 44yrs. 13 months ago to a deadly cancer and he died a slow painful death over 3yrs.39days and I felt every pain with him. My sorrow was great and I thought I would never recover. Even 13 months later I still have bad days. I started structuring my day with small things and this has helped make a difference to my grief. But to feel lost, lonely, and broken for days, months and for some years is not uncommon.The saddest part of grief is not having our loved one in our life to share our life on a daily basis. Missing all those special attributes that give them their personality. Every person is unique in their own way. They add to our life and its quality and when they leave us it is as if the light has gone out and all we see is the darkness. It takes a long time for the light to shine again.I am glad you said you know Jesus. Cling to your Faith more now than ever as it is what will get you and us all through this grief. God gave us life and he takes it back. WE get to enjoy life for a season. This life will be renewed one day according to God's promise to come back for us so that we can be with him. Now this is something to hold on to. If we live without HOPE we have nothing to cling to and life would be pointless. For us who are left we have no choice but to go on each day and make the best of the life we have left. Grief is part of our life now and with God's help we will recover. But it is still a horrible journey of loss without the one we have loved and lost.