National Debt

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It's long been understood that the "Music Video" is the ideal information delivery system ("Conjunction Junction" settled that debate years ago), so it's about Goddamn time Austrian economists became more hip-hop focused:

Before we all move on with our lives (and never mention Obama's Goddamn birth certificate ever again) let's step back and put this shit in context. Obama's employers (Americans) have been asking him to turn in some paperwork for almost 3 fucking years... to which, he's basically replied: "I've got more important things to do. You're just a paranoid racist... By the way, it's so likely that every American is a mass murdering traitor that if you want to board an airplane, I'm going to need to take some naked pictures to make sure you're not hiding a bomb under your balls, and give full prison-style pat-downs to nine-year-old little girls."

Really?... So it's totally reasonable to assume everyone in this country is a traitorous suicide grundle bomber, but asking to double check the paperwork of the guy in control of a nuclear arsenal is somehow crazy? When did a full taint inspection become less private than a standard government document?

It's been clear from day one that this whole fucking birth certificate thing was a manufactured issue. The Left wanted people to take the bait. From the moment Obama announced he was running for President, his supporters (and the media) have been using the "racist" attack nonstop. This was simply another political tactic to paint the Right as racist conspiracy theorists. However, recent polls showed that too many people were starting to buy into the whole "Kenya" thing. The issue started doing more harm than good, so he finally decided to take it off the table.

Now, he was obviously born in Hawaii... but even if he wasn't, who gives a fuck? It's Moot. The battle's not just with one man, it's a battle of ideas. You don't win a battle of ideas on a "Booth Review" and you don't win it by whining that the other side cheated. You win it by getting swashbucklingly good at destroying liberal’s arguments. You win it by reading Hayek, Rand, Friedman, Mises, Rothbard and hundreds of others... by studying until your Kung Fu is so Goddamn strong that it's considered a "war crime" to use against civilians.

Guess who was just caught on tape teaching college kids that "Violence is a tactic, and it's to be used when it's the appropriate tactic"? If you answered "A Teabagger" teaching “Introduction to Austrian Economics” you're a fucking idiot who’s been watching too much MSNBC. Like always, it was a Goddamn left-wing union douchebag (teaching "Introduction to Labor Studies" and "Labor Politics and Society"). America... these are the people you're up against, they’re violent, they don't like you, and they don't like the country. But that’s why liberty will win in the end... when people see collectivists talking this way, they won't fucking stand for it:

P.S. Remember Obama's discription of his college days in his book "Dreams From My Father"?

To avoid being mistaken for a sellout, I chose my friends carefully. The more politically active black students. The foreign students. The Chicanos. The Marxist Professors and the structural feminists and punk-rock performance poets. We smoked cigarettes and wore leather jackets. At night, in the dorms, we discussed neocolonialism, Franz Fanon, Eurocentrism, and patriarchy. When we ground out our cigarettes in the hallway carpet or set our stereos so loud that the walls began to shake, we were resisting bourgeois society's stifling constraints.

Are you the type of person who enjoys heated political discussions? Do you have fond memories of reducing liberals to tears in front of their friends and family? Have you been known to drunkenly challenge progressives to ritualistic combat in the form of impromptu Kumite tournaments? If so, it's about time you had a shirt as belligerent as your Goddamn personality.

With Absolute Despotism's new line of shirts, you'll never again be forced to draw elaborate visual aids to illustrate this fundamental principle: Collectivist douchebags who promote Government authority are the suckers of the Government's cock. Instigating/shit-talking the left (at bars, beer pong tournaments, or church) has never been easier!

Good news everyone! President Obama ordered the Justice Department to investigate why gasoline prices are so high. The Government's definitely going to find out who's responsible (right after O.J. finds the real killer). Goddamnit, if this wasn't just a political stunt, the investigation's findings would consist entirely of a "Supply and Demand" graph drawn a cocktail napkin... But this is purely political, so the investigation will take forever (all the while giving Obama political cover to say "We've got our best men looking into it") and finally report: "Although we found no specific instances of wrongdoing, we recommend stronger Government regulations and controls over the oil industry."

Let's see… Why might the price of gasoline be going up? Well, first of all, the price spikes every spring, developing countries are consuming more gasoline, and the Middle East has degenerated into a cluster fuck. Anything else?... oh yeah, how about the fucking Government cock blocking American industry at every turn, or Obama telling people not to expect gas prices to come down anytime soon, or government restrictions of offshore drilling, or the government making it ridiculously difficult to get even legitimate drilling permits, or the government's efforts to regulate CO2 (which would drive up refining costs), or the EPA making it impossible to build shit in this country? (Liberals, when the Obama administration made it harder to produce gasoline... what the fuck did you think would happen to the price? You can hate oil, or have cheep oil, not both you dumb bastards.)

Now Liberals, you're constantly attacking oil companies for making "Record profits", "Obscene profits", "Windfall profits" and "gouging" the American people... On a gallon of gas, "Big Oil" companies make evil profits of about 10 cents. 10 fucking cents per gallon. If you think that's "obscene"... what the fuck do you call the Federal Government's tax of 18 cents per gallon? Or the State Government's average tax of 30 cents per gallon?... Goddamnit liberals, if 10 fucking cents is "gouging"... what the fuck do you call this:

If the government did a shitty job inexpensively, that would be one thing. If they did a great job but wasted tons of money, it wouldn't be so bad. But they don't... they waste shit-loads of your money and deliver nothing but a bottomless pile of fuck.

So the EPA decided to create a rap to teach kids about "Climate Change". First of all... no! Go fuck yourself, that's the worst idea in American history. Whoever proposed it should have been fired on the spot and punched at least 3 or 4 times. But instead, their supervisor thought "That's a crackerjack idea! Kids these days love rap music with a good, clean, responsible message. We've got some money to burn, let's do it!"

"The USA is where we are to kick a new trend and to raise the bar. The climate is changing and that’s a fact, bears don’t know when to take a nap, On top of that it won’t be cool when the flood waters rise and mosquitoes rule. It’s time to get off the couch and start to move." That's literally the worst thing ever written in any language.

Everyone's quick to jump all over some middle school girl who makes a crappy music video about "Friday", Good Morning America will even call it the "Worst video in the world" and try to make her cry on national television... but where the fuck are they on this one? They don't think it's worth reporting that a little girl can do a better job (for less money) than the fucking government? That the very kids the EPA is targeting with this rap are more competent than the douchebags in Washington?... If this were Japan, the head of the EPA would set himself on fire after disgracing his country like this.

Also, if you're going to try to indoctrinate people through the magic of song, you have to make it fucking catchy. Goddamnit, it's not complicated. Everyone reading this remembers four or five telephone numbers from old commercials, for businesses that don't even exist anymore. Why? Because the jingle was fucking catchy! The song's not just bad, it's ineffective.

Worst of all... after they finished writing and recording the song, when it was edited and mastered, they sat down, listened to it and said "Yep, sounds good. Let's publish it" instead of the intelligent response which is "Holy fuck! How high were we when we made this shit? Christ. Delete that immediately and burn the computer it was saved on!" The next time Obama's giving a speech on the debt crisis, when he starts saying the only solution is to raise taxes, someone in the crowd needs to stand up, hold a 1980's boom box over their head (like Cusack) and blast this rap until he shuts the fuck up.