Case Number 18768

TOMBSTONE (BLU-RAY)

The Charge

"Skin that smokewagon and see what happens!"

Opening Statement

Tombstone rules. Does the anticipated HD release live up to its
Alpha-male glory? Nope.

Facts of the Case

The Earp brothers are angling for some cash. Wyatt (Kurt Russell,
Deathproof), Virgil (Sam Elliott) and Morgan (Bill Paxton, Aliens)
roll into the silver-mining boomtown of Tombstone to make their fortune. The
last thing that legendary lawman Wyatt Earp wants to do is get back into the
crime-fighting business, but when an outlaw gang starts messing with his women,
it's time to bring down the thunder.

The Evidence

Upon rewatching this for the...I don't know, 500th time, it occurred to me
that Tombstone is certainly the all-time "that guy" movie.
Virtually everyone, down to the throwaway extras, is a familiar face. Thomas
Haden Church. Stephen Lang. John Corbett. Powers Boothe. Michael Rooker. Michael
Biehn. Jason Priestley. Billy Zane. Terry O'Quinn. Charlton frggin' Heston. This
observation doesn't really have much to do with anything except for the fact
that nearly all of these actors likely recognized how bad-ass the final product
was going to be and signed on to be a part of it, no matter if it was for a
major role or just getting shot in the stomach by Kurt Russell.

And the mustaches. Oh, the mustaches!

Look, you don't need me to tell you how awesome Tombstone is; the
legendary glory of Val Kilmer's performance, how Kurt Russell's macho bravado
can strip wallpaper, the sheer awesomeness of the train station scene. When it
comes to modern Westerns, none have yet to eclipse Tombstone's
brilliance.

Here's what I can tell you that may not know, the Blu-ray is a waste of
everyone's time and is indicative of why people have -- and should -- distrust
ballyhooed home video format "revolutions."

There are plenty of killer Blu-rays out there of course, and any new film
that gets purchased for the Johnson household is in a blue case. But this
release of the Tombstone is representative of everything that's wrong
with a double-dip format upgrade.

First, the technical aspects, which are good, but not mindblowing. The
2.35:1 transfer is an upgrade over the DVD version and a cursory eyeballing of
the film reveals it. The windswept wasteland of the Wild West looks great and I
defy you to find a better-rendered mustache. Still, the visual bump is a matter
of degrees; the soft picture quality falling short of new Blu releases and even
a majority of the higher-performing catalog discs. Good sound, though, with a
well-mixed 5.1 DTS Master Audio pushing the memorable score and the hectic
gunfights.

It's when we get to the extras that my ire gets up. All that's here is the
antiquated making-of documentary (featuring some out-of-whack aspect ratio) and
storyboards. Meanwhile, on my DVD shelf, sits the special edition of the
Tombstone DVD, housed in gorgeous packaging and sporting a large
selection of great extras. Thisis what irks me, a studio pumping out a
bare bones Blu-ray release, knowing full well that a perfectly serviceable slate
of extras exists already. That either means that yet another special edition is
on the way (a dick move) or the studio merely half-assed the release.

Closing Statement

There aren't many flicks I love as much as Tombstone, but this Blu-ray
is a cur.