Hello, postal pals! It's another cold, snowy day in the
post-apocalypse, and I'm stuck on the road, by which I mean I'm in the middle
of some forest somewhere. It's so cold I had to cut open my horse so I could
crawl inside to stay warm… except my horse was a pony, and I can really only
get my head and shoulders in here. Also, I've been here for days, so even the
horse is pretty goddamn cold. What I'm saying is, if you have the chance to
stick your head in the stomach cavity of a frozen horse, it's not as great as
you might suspect.

Spider Bites

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Kent M.:

As I'm sure was not uncommon for Spider-Man fans born in the
early- to mid-80s, I felt betrayed and let down by the events of the infamous
One More Day/Brand New Day arcs. Having been an avid AMS reader up to that
point and having grown up reading Spider-Man in a well established marriage to
MJ, I did not like the message that Marvel was sending, essentially that I was
no-longer the target audience of the strip. Now, I of course understand and
respect that Marvel and Joe Quesada had the right and even the duty to keep ASM
fresh and continue to pull in new readers. Had they gone about the events in a
different fashion, and not retconned some great story arcs in the process
(specifically the death of Harry Osborn) at the same time I might have forgiven
them. I did not however, and chose to consider AMS ended and moved on with my
life.

Fast forward five years and several hundred
issues of AMS. I shook my head at the changes introduced in Dying Wish, but it
was just more of the same by this point.

Then I had the fortune of noting a Q&A with
the Superior Spider-Man writer, Dan Slott, on this very site. I decided it
would be fun to check out, expecting to see a slew of Spider-Man fans blasting
him for what he did to Peter. On the contrary, most posters had high praise for
the direction he had taken the strip. Now with the announcement that Peter will
return to the rightful place in his comic, and body, I'm wonder if it's time to
bury the hatchet with Marvel over AMS.

While I don't hold any hope for a re-retconning
of Brand New Day, maybe Marvel hasn't been as far out in left field as I
thought. Should I give my favorite super hero another chance?

Yes.

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Oh, you need more? Okay.

American comic books are weird because they are not one long
story, as much as the numbering system would like you to believe (not that
comic companies bother with that much any more), they are institutions. Spider-Man
has been more or less active for 50 years, and while the comics technically tell the
life story of Peter Parker — most of the time — they are being written by
countless different people with very different ideas of what the comic should
be about. And then they're edited by people who have their own vision of what Spider-Man should be. And then the company itself is run by an
editor-in-chief who has his own mandate about what Peter Parker should be doing.

What I'm saying is that there is virtually no fucking chance
of any American superhero comic having any kind of narrative or editorial consistency because these comics run forever and the people working on them
change constantly. There are always
going to be shitty Spider-Man stories now and then — to abandon the character entirely
because of a single one doesn't achieve anything but cause to you miss later
good stories featuring your favorite character.

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Do I think Joe Quesada handled "One More Day" correctly? Not
even slightly. It was dumb, completely inconsistent with the character, and
clumsily handled. And I fully understand you being upset if all you'd known was
married Peter Parker and all of a sudden you had that rug yanked out from
under you; it would be sad and infuriating.

But this is the price you pay for being an American comics
fan. Certainly there were many people who felt the same anger during Spider-Man's
Clone Saga, which managed to cause an outcry so fierce Marvel had to take it
back. Some X-Men fans were surely upset when Jean Grey died (the first time). I
was pissed at pretty much every change made in Avengers #280-300. But think
about all the great Spider-Man, X-Men and Avengers comics we would have missed
if we'd given them up completely at that point! And I can tell you that, while
Peter Parker is still super-unmarried, many of Dan Slott's post-OMD comics have
been excellent (the "Spider-Island" arc is a personal favorite of mine) and if
you read them you'd probably enjoy them a great deal, unless Peter's marriage to
Mary Jane was the sole thing you liked about Spider-Man.

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If it makes you feel any better, in 20 years, there's going
to be a new Marvel EiC who thinks that Peter Parker should be married to Mary
Jane, and there'll be a new wedding. And in 40 years, there'll be another EiC
who thinks that Peter shouldn't ever be married, and retcon this new marriage so
that Peter unknowingly married a Skrull or something. In 50 years, there'll be
an EiC who thinks that the Clone Saga had the right idea and will decide Ben Reilly
was the original after all. This shit is going to happen, constantly, as long
as you read American comics. This is why people can handle things like Peter
Parker dying tragically so Doc Ock can run around in Spider-Man's body for a
few years; even if writer Dan Slott wasn't going to bring Peter back (although he
was always going to), another writer would eventually.

This is your deal
with Mephisto — you're going to get Spider-Man comics for your entire life, but
the price is that some of them will be terrible, and some will dramatically
change the status quo. The best you can do is not read the comics you don't
like, and try out new writers whenever they get assigned to the comic. Collect what
you like, don't read what you don't. Don't stress about one single continuity
because that way lies madness. If true continuity is all that matters to you,
you should read manga, because those are generally written and drawn by the same people
for their entire runs, meaning they are (usually) consistent, start to finish.
Major American superhero comics don't finish. This is the trade-off.

Girls, Interrupted

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Lisa R.:

Dear Carrier of Future Mail:

I just
finished reading the December 4, 2013 column you wrote analyzing why certain
female characters in genre movies and TV shows are deeply hated by the fans.
It was great! I thought your opinions were very challenging and
honest, and there is a great deal of validity to your observation that some
viewers give female characters less leeway to make bad choices than they do
male characters, which I find disturbing but unsurprising.

However,
I write to raise a related issue that I would like to read your take on, namely
why are some female characters — sometimes in the same movie or show — loved
by the same fans who excoriate other female characters? Two examples come
to mind: First, Michonne from The Walking Dead, who has made some bad choices
herself (starting with "killing" the Governor's walker daughter
which, even on a show that revolves largely around killing walkers, seemed a
poor choice at the time). Second, Sif from the Thor movies who, while not known for her bad decision-making,
is still just not that interesting or compelling a character (for my part, she
seems defined mainly by her body-hugging armor); by contrast, Jane Foster is
cute, funny, extremely smart, gutsy and in every reasonable way an admirable
character, her only apparent downside being that she doesn't sling a sword or
wear armor, yet I distinctly recall comments on this very site from fans who
said variations on "I hate Jane Foster, I wish she would die and Thor
would marry Sif." Obviously, there are other possible examples.

One
thing that both Michonne and Sif have in common are that they are brave
fighting women who can beat their enemies as well as the male characters in
their stories can. That makes me wonder if the key difference between
female characters that fans hate and those they love is that fans hate
"girly" female characters but love "tough guy" female
characters. That's not to say that I think Jane Foster is particularly "girly"
(though she is clearly "girlier" than Sif), but then again Andrea,
for example, was not particularly "girly" (though there was that
fling with the Governor that could be viewed as sexualizing her, but on the
other hand I think Andrea was a hated character long before the third season).
So, I think there may be something to this but I'm not sure how much of a
role this phenomenon plays.

But I don't want to say this is a female character only
problem; male characters who physically beat up bad guys are generally more
celebrated than male characters who outthink their opponents. That's why Sherlock
Holmes in his TV shows is a detective, but Sherlock Holmes of the infinitely
more prevalent movies is a bare-knuckle boxer who has fights on the tops of
semi-constructed buildings and trains.
It's why people like it when Batman outsmarts his opponents, but they
prefer it when he beats the crap out of them.

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I don't really know why this is; maybe it's a gender thing,
maybe its an American thing. All I know if we generally prefer our heroes to be
strong more than smart, and since female characters have to split time as love
interests, wherein they need to be less powerful than the hero in order to
warrant them needing to be rescued, they're more likely to not be physically
powerful, and this not be considered badass, regardless of what else they might
accomplish.

On a random note, I really love Jane Foster, but the reason
I love her might not be what you think. I love that Jane is a brilliant
astrophsyicist whose brain basically shuts down whenever Thor takes off his
shirt. Not that male characters have a tough time of it, generally, but one of
the most prevalent clichés in entertainment if for men to turn into drooling
morons whenever a pretty girl comes on-screen, and I genuinely appreciate that
they made that choice with Jane — not only does it give her sexual agency, it
makes sense, because Chris Hemsworth's body should be mesmerizing women, no
matter how many degrees they have. It's a weird sort of equality, but I
appreciate it nonetheless.

Nintend'oh

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Mauricio D.:

Mr Postman —

Just finished reading "What killed the
American anime industry?", and I felt like asking you one question.

I'm a child of the 80's and 90's. I grew up
with the NES. I loved (still do) playing games, Super Mario Bros, The Legend of
Zelda, Metroid, are my favorite games. You can imagine my excitement when I
found out about the Mario movie. I didn't get the chance to see it n the
theater, so when it finally came out on VHS, I went with my mom to my
neighborhood video rental store, got the tape home, turned on my TV, put it on
channel 3, placed the tape in the VCR, started watching and...... SURPRISE!!!
My 12 year old eyes could not believe what was on the TV. Big disappointment.

Based on this: Will we ever see another movie based on a Nintendo franchise?

My personal opinion is that the franchises that I love contain good
enough material to make a good movie, CGI can accomplish the proper
visual effects we need to see, and there are writers, that also love this
characters, that could create a great script.

Let me know your thoughts!

Sorry, man, but the Postman had to track down his Magic
8-Ball for this one, and the answer came back "Reply hazy, ask again later."
Back in the Nintendo 64 and GameCube days, Nintendo probably could have made
live-action Super Mario, Zelda, Metroid, and Donkey Kong movies, and done
pretty well for themselves.

Nowadays? I don't think so. Nintendo's lost its cultural cache, as have its
franchises. The Wii was popular, but not because of the games, because of the motion control gimmick; and neither the WiiU nor its games have much clout. If
Nintendo can gain the industry and pop culture dominance it had in the late
'80s and '90s — which is not impossible, but going to be pretty damned
difficult — then they can make these live-action movies and have them do well,
but not before. It's all dependent on Nintendo getting its shit together, and
that does not seem to be in the cards any time soon.

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I'd also like to say that I'm guessing videogames are going
to be the next big craze after superhero/comic book movies lose their luster
(not that they'll go away, but they'll become part-and-parcel of our
entertainment world, so that studios begin looking for a new entertainment
genre to mine from).

Save the Date

Hubert:

Dear Mr Postman,

News recently broke that the Superman/Batman movie originally
slated for 2015 will be pushed back for a May 2016 release. Some entertainment
news outlets have characterized this move as a "showdown" or
"throwing down the gauntlet" against Marvel, because early May has
traditionally been when Marvel releases a big superhero movie.

Is it really though? I mean, if they were
interested in a big "showdown" you think WB would open up
Superman/Batman against Avengers 2. Instead they're pushing back the film by a
whole year to challenge... Unnamed Marvel Movie 2016. This feels less like a
throwing down of the gauntlet, and more like WB backing down from a fight, and
then sneaking over to Marvel's door to leave a bag of flaming poop the next
day.

Seriously, we don't even know what the heck
Marvel is doing in 2016, only that they'll be doing something. Seems likely
that it's Ant Man, given what we know about Marvel films in production. Would
be funny if Marvel surprises everyone by announcing Iron Man 4 for that date
though, because I really don't think WB would want to have a showdown against
that.

Why do you think WB pushed the movie to 2016?
And, being in the future post-apocalypse, can you tell me how Marvel responded?

Let me assure you this is not WB throwing down the gauntlet,
Infinity or otherwise. Movie studios don't use release dates as pissing
matches; think of them more like a game of chicken, where both drivers are
completely terrified of the possibility of being in a wreck. Neither Marvel nor
WB have any desire to go up against each other, because they know the audience
for both films are the same people — and instead of all those people seeing
their movie, some of them will go see the other guy's movie, which means
they're both going to make less money than they would if they had their own
weekend.

I'm 99% sure the reason WB pushed back Batman/Superman is
because they realized they needed more time to make it — not exactly a shocker
given all the superheroes they've been adding to it (confirmed and rumored).
Since they had to delay anyways, they decided to claim May 2016 before Marvel
could. I'm sure they're glad they took the release date before Marvel did —
much like anyone who calls "Shotgun!" is glad to have beaten his or her fellow
passengers — but giving Batman/Superman even time to get made and picking a
good release date were the main priorities. May 2016 was open, and they took
it.

Marvel responded by continually releasing three-to-four
major superhero movies and making a zillion dollars.

Rec' It Ralph

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Chris P.:

Thanks for delivering the New Years
card from my neighbor. Quick question though. Given that my neighbor lives next
door to me, why did the card arrive four years late? Has the calendar become a
somewhat subjective recommendation? Has the majority of people forgotten how to
count or are we just throwing darts at the wall to pick what year we're getting
ready to head through?

On another and far more important note: since
you're somewhat of an anime buff I wanted your input about the best way to
sort through the mounds and mounds of crap out there to find the anime that a
particular viewer would like. This is mainly coming up as a sidenote from my
experience with Netflix (from the framing of the first paragraph I'm apparently
also living in the post apocalyptic future, so let's I just raided one of
their shipping facilities). I've sat down to a number of series that sounded
interesting only to get an episode or two in to just decide that it is too
far from my tastes. Is there a better way?

P.S. What do you do when you get a letter or
package that's supposed to go overseas?

Unfortunately, without more specific details of what anime
you enjoy, it's difficult to give you specific tips about the most effective
way to find new shows you'll like. Your best best is to go check out the anime you do like on Amazon, Netflix, Anime Planet, or whatever, and then check out
the "People who like So-and-So" also enjoy…" sections. Check out enough of
these, and you'll see certain titles repeated a few times, and those will be
your best bet.

One caveat: I've found that the first episodes of many anime
series to be, in a word, terrible. I'm not sure why this is, but waaaaay too
many anime series play their pilots completely safe, going through almost
universally the same motions to establish the premise, and as such they are
frequently boring — sometimes the second episode, too. Back when I worked at
Anime Insider, I tried to give most series 3-4 episodes to grab me, because
only by that point could I get a decent sense of how the show was really going
to be.

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Obviously, this is not always the case; some anime start out
strong right out of the gate, and sometimes you can tell a show isn't up your
alley in the first three minutes. But if you're on the fence, I'd try to make
sure you at least make it through two or three episodes before giving up.

Oh — the reason it took four years for me to deliver that
letter to you? Because it's the fucking post-apocalypse. I'm not talking about
the rogue armies and roaming marauders, I mean nobody has a GPS anymore, and
nobody has maps. You can write "New Portland" on your letter all you want, but
unless I've been there, I have no fucking clue where that is, and no idea how
to get there. I know the suns sets in the west, in the evening, and that's
about as much navigation as I can handle. Basically, your mail gets delivered
when I accidentally wander into your town.

PS — "What do you do when you get a letter or package that's
supposed to go overseas?" I punch you in the dick, that's what.

Do you have questions about anything scifi, fantasy, superhero, or nerd-related? Email thepostman@io9.com! No question too difficult, no question too dumb! Obviously!