Tanille Geib: ‘Whether it’s a stare or a physical touch or dancing too close, they can come to me.’
Photograph: Paloma Kapitany Victoria

Most nights of the week, Tanille Geib can be found wandering through drunken crowds on a dance floor in the western Canadian city of Victoria.

She’s not a bartender or a bouncer – she’s there to help patrons navigate the sometimes murky world of flirting, dating and hooking up in the wake of the #MeToo movement.

Geib was hired by the Victoria Event Centre last month as a “consent captain” – a position believed to be the first of its kind in the country. The job joins a raft of other initiatives around the world aimed at fighting back against sexual harassment and assault – but also guiding those who are struggling to move forward.

“Since the #MeToo movement, we now know what sexual assault is, and we’re like, ‘OK, we really don’t want to do that any more,’” she said. “But then there’s this whole grey cloud area around what acting in consent and consensual relationships are.”

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Geib – who has worked as a sex health educator across North America – came up with the position after attending a few dance parties held by a local collective at the centre. After hearing a raft of “icky” stories , she put her skills to work, creating a position where someone would be on the floor to address the issues as they happened. Then the Victoria Event Centre, which hosts everything from live concerts to burlesque shows, made contact.

“They started noticing that our dances were better, more safe and more inclusive and accessible to folks,” she said. “So they approached me, saying: ‘Hey, would you want to come and do this for all of our events? What would that look like?’”

Geib often hovers by the door, introducing herself to people as they enter and letting them know that she’s there to chat or answer any questions about consent. Photograph: Handout

The collaboration has transformed the space, which is now adorned with posters on consent and signs that spell out the house policy on the issue.

Towards the beginning of the night, Geib often hovers by the door, introducing herself to people as they enter and letting them know that she’s there to chat or answer any questions about consent.

Anyone who experiences behaviour that makes them uncomfortable is encouraged to speak with her. “Whether it’s a stare or a physical touch or dancing too close, they can come to me,” she said.

As the night continues, she checks on those who seem heavily intoxicated, making sure they’re safe and offering to get them a glass of water or help them into a taxi if needed.

In the few short weeks that she’s been on the job, she’s fielded complaints ranging from inappropriate comments to more explicit harassment. Her response depends on those who report the issues; Geib always asks whether they want her to speak to the people carrying out the offending behaviour.

If they do, she launches into action. Often she starts by asking how their night is going and whether they need any support. “Depending on how those two questions go, I introduce myself, ‘I’m Tanille and I’ve just gotten some feedback about your behaviour. You’re making someone uncomfortable, do you want to have a conversation with that?’”

Some have simply thanked her, saying they didn’t realise how their behaviour was coming across. Others have turned hostile, refusing to listen to her and forcing her to turn to her security team for backup.

“We’ve had to kick out a couple of people,” she said. “But I always try and give them my card, and be like: ‘Hey, if you want to chat again, please do so and we would welcome you back into this space.’”

Geib stressed that she’s not there to police people’s behaviour. “I’m not here to check in and make sure everyone has full consent. That’s not fun and I would not want that job.”

So far the position seems to be having an impact, she said. “The biggest change that we’ve seen is more conversation around consent culture and how to have those conversations normally – without shame and guilt.”

Geib was quick to correct this view. “People are just scared, they’re thinking that all these rules mean no fun,” she said. “But actually the whole point is that I want people to have more pleasure and connection in their lives.”

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