KSK Kontent Klearinghouse: Terrible swaddlers, Schlereth’s pilot, and Schefter out on a limb

Clay Travis can’t wait to punch those babies in their stupid partially developed skulls.

The Steelers are playing in the Super Bowl, which means it’s time to roll out the feature about newborns being wrapped in Terrible Towels.

Justin Eitel of Mt. Lebanon couldn’t help but take at least 50 snapshots of his new daughter wrapped up in the towel. He had no doubts about which team she would be rooting for when she grows up.

“She can choose her religion,” Eitel said, “but she can’t choose what team she likes.”

Being a Steelers fan is just like being gay.

• The NFLPA sponsors a collegiate all star game that is airing on the CBS College Sports Network. They wanted to air one of their “Let Them Play” ads during the game, but CBS rejected it. So now an ad that would have been seen by a handful of player personnel guys will now get all sorts of attention. But hey, at least they’re keeping the owners happy. Oh, and if all of this just makes you think about The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training then you’re ripping off Bill Simmons. You should go apologize for remembering that scene.

• Speaking of college all star games, the big one took place on Saturday. In case you missed it (please tell me you missed it), Jake Locker is still a subpar thrower of footballs, and Von Miller is way too good for such a shitty exhibition. If the Redskins pass on him to take Cam Newton I’ll…I’ll…bitch about it on Twitter.

• Remember when Jim Zorn’s name was being floated for an offensive coordinator job? Well last week Baltimore decided he wasn’t up to the task of coaching their quarterbacks. I know, it’s hilarious. Well Joe Flacco isn’t laughing because he takes this as a “kind of an attack” on him. And well he should, because it is. It so is. [Via]

• CBS has the perfect new role for Jim Belushi once they’re forced to cancel The Defenders. America’s leader in laugh tracks and procedural crime dramas has ordered a pilot of Home Game, a television show based on the life of ESPN NFL analyst Mark Schlereth. Mark Wahlberg and Stephen Levinson (Entourage) are the executive producers, which can only mean bad things. At least they can be counted on to cast some hot piece as Mark’s daughter Alexandria. She’s swell.

• The following is a headline on ESPN’s NFL page, “Schefter: Woodson is Green Bay’s X factor.” Now don’t go getting too excited, because that there’s an ESPN Insider headline. That means you’ll need to pony up to learn why Adam thinks the reigning Defensive Player of the Year might have an impact on Sunday’s outcome.

• Man, the Pro Bowl sucked. You know how I know? NFL.com told me all about it.

Terrible towels are just thundersticks for people whose asses require something heftier than 10-ply.

By: Koy Detmer's Underrated Neckbeard

01.31.2011 @ 2:49 PM

@Flab – Despair and bad Billy Joel songs. HACHACHA!! Try the veal!

/shows self out

By: PepeSilvia

01.31.2011 @ 2:54 PM

I love that Clay Travis’ column pissing on the Terrible Towel caused such a widespread outcry amongst shithead Steelers fans, but it just made me wish there was a way to make all of those tards read Caveman’s epic hategasm too. It might cause the entire city to spontaneously combust, and that, my friends, would be worthy of a Booker Prize.

By: johndewar

01.31.2011 @ 2:55 PM

Being a Steelers fan is just like being gay.

It’s like that, but with more in breeding.

By: Nimby

01.31.2011 @ 2:56 PM

Oddly the yinzer gene is usually inherited from one’s step-father.

By: Chad Henne Checkdown Clinic

01.31.2011 @ 3:01 PM

Sorry, Maj, most scouts have him projected to go at number 4 at the latest. At least your team isn’t going to trade their pick down, though, right?

/Kicks something

By: LaFavre's Next Tractor

01.31.2011 @ 3:06 PM

Oh yeah, well being a Green Bay fan is just like being a fatty. No wait, it is being a fatty.Being a Green Bay fan is just like being a slow learner. No wait they’re that too. Damn, this is hard.

By: yeatdog

01.31.2011 @ 3:06 PM

Good thing Roethlisberger wasn’t at the Pro Bowl then.

By: Dr. Awesomus

01.31.2011 @ 3:06 PM

The comments on that Travis column are an argument for eugenics.

By: Brocky

01.31.2011 @ 3:10 PM

I do wish more People set their kids straight earlier. If they did we’d have less bandwagon fans. That being said we may have more little fat humps being wrapped in triple xxxl fleece blankets, but i figure like republicans, some just shouldn’t be allowed to reproduce at all.

By: 85

01.31.2011 @ 3:12 PM

I consider myself one of the biggest haters of all things Steelers fan-related, but Clay Travis broke the game. First of all, that article he wrote was awful, stupid, shitty garbage. But the comments are one of the most epic collections of HURRRRRRRRRRR I’ve ever seen on the internets, so much so that I’m convinced Travis wrote the article for the sole purpose of breaking the needle off the Trollometer. Truly a thing of beauty.

By: Upstate Underdog

01.31.2011 @ 3:17 PM

The first picture has to be some sort of evidence of child abuse. The entire staff of that hospital should be arrested.

More ham-fisted Pittsburgh trolling by some retard Philly columnist. At least Clay tried a little. This is pathetic, and so perfectly suited to Philly.

By: jackin'4beats

01.31.2011 @ 3:54 PM

Mark Schlereth getting his own sit-com is all kinds of turrible. Let’s just hope it gets cancelled faster than Emeril’s show did on NBC. The networks suck ass; it’s just a matter of time before the Super Bowl is broadcast on Versus.

By: deafjeff

01.31.2011 @ 3:57 PM

Maybe the Bills reach and take Von Miller 3rd. They already have a Van Miller Press Box.

I’m assuming the Mark Schlereth show will clumsily try to chop block the competition on CBS its first night on the air and then be suspended for the rest of the season.

Then it will go under the knife, otherwise known as getting cut from the active roster after it’s 21st knee surgery. Just like Mark is fond of reminding us every Thursday morning.

By: K-Mart

01.31.2011 @ 6:56 PM

Steeler gay, the Blue Collar Gay.

By: Paul-God

01.31.2011 @ 8:44 PM

Jesus… This year’s trophies are fucking horrible!

Is Goodell preparing us for a redesigned Lombardi somewhere in the future?

ALL HAIL GOODELL!

By: JJ Fozz

01.31.2011 @ 9:43 PM

Hey Joe you stupid ass fuck, it is a message to you: either start moving faster and thinking on your feet or look for another job.

Your numbers were okay, but you sucked ASS this season – there are other receivers besides rice and mason. Football games last for 60 minutes, not 30 you one eyebrowed finger fuck.

Hopefully you’ll show everyone in this shithole city what you’re made of come next Sept, and you can start by beating the Steelers like the over rated crotch rot they are.

By: The steeler fan in peru

01.31.2011 @ 10:46 PM

@JJ Fozz…

That overrated crotch rot has beaten your team quite a lot over the last few years especially when it counts.

You really oughta blame Cam Cam. Or the Refs. Flacco’s the best QB in your franchises history

By: Moose (Stephen Hawking is faking it)

02.01.2011 @ 12:20 AM

@JJ Fozz; issues?

That Clay article was some fine, lofty trolling. It was like a game of “Poke the Caged Inbred with a Stick” times 100,000 (not sure if there is that many that can type). Don’t get me wrong; the Fudgepacker fans seem as fat and stupid, they just don’t foam at the mouth as much (or other openings).

Over under: Number of Mark Schlereth show episodes vs number of Tony Kornheiser inspired “Listen Up” episodes (22). Which, of course, also bombed on the Number one station for new Sitcom/Dramas/Rehashes/Geriatric Shows

By: Moose (Stephen Hawking is faking it)

02.01.2011 @ 3:48 PM

I just went back to the Clay Travis article and the comments are up to, well an avalanche of retardedness, wait I don’t want to insult retards because they are mostly nice and try hard. This is great trolling. I’m sure most people from Pittsburg are fine individuals, however this group is beyond idiocy, delving into a new dimension of stupid, for now let’s call it the turd dimension.