::Journal::
My heart breaks for Saul. He is so decieved and lost in his own misery. In this passage we see Saul kill 85 priests and their families. I never, ever want to be like Saul. I committ to the Lord this day that I will continue to present my heart and motives to him so that I do not walk in insecurity.

I repented before a dear friend yesterday. I asked the Lord to forgive me for my disobedience. He has been asking me to eat right. For over a year I know that God has been specifically asking me to discipline myself. For over a year I have walked in disobedience. When I first started to pray I asked the Lord to soften my heart and to help me hate sin the way that he does. After just a few minutes I was crying like a baby as I realized the gravity of my sin. I became emotional as I truly was able to see the weight of my rebellion, but also as I was able to again acknowledge the new man inside of me. The New Man wants to serve and wants righteousness. Praise the Lord. I can see, a little bit at a time, what he is doing with me.

“…don’t fail to correct your children. They won’t die if you spank them. Physical discipline may well save them from death…”

Proverbs doesn’t mess around. I love it. In this day and age there are many opinions about the way children should be raised. As a young parent I can’t tell you how difficult it is to know what to do. My daughter (3 1/2) is wonderful, but she doesn’t hesitate to push her boundaries. My wife and I are constantly challenged. We need the wisdom of the Lord (which I see here).
God, I love you. I am devoted to you. Help me to become all that you have called me to be. I give you this day…all of it…I pray that I would honor you in all that I do…