Speaking of which, do not have poverty and about 1/3 of watermelon to yourself for breakfast and lunch. Just don't. Your body will be might confused on what exactly it's supposed to do with the combination in your gut.

I needed about a tablespoon of gray paint, and I lucked out - Home Depot had a dented can of something in the exact color I wanted for $0.25. Looks nice and thick and paints on well.

Except when I went to wash off my little cheap-o foam brush, I got the paint all over my hands - and discovered it's not actually paint, it's some sort of Rust-oleum knockoff. Which does NOT wash off like paint does. I was able to scrub most of it off my hand (Mr. Clean magic erasers work on people too!) but one hand still has a distinctly grayish cast to it.

Same with spinach and blueberries. You will have lots of alone time if you do.

Oh, the watermelon. My DD ate nearly an entire (small) watermelon by herself over the course of a day (various relatives fed her and she asked for 2+ servings each meal!). Who'd have thought something that is little more than water could have that unfortunate an effect??

*** For the education of newcomers to our forum, this joke refers to an old thread. One of our members posted that she was nuking oatmeal in the office microwave. A co-worker complained that oatmeal smells like poverty. We then proceeded to detail how we like our poverty.

You may now return to doing things that probably weren't a bright idea to do. ***

eHell should have a memes thread, where every meme gets its own post (updated when something new achieves meme status) so we can link to individual posts in the thread as a quickie footnote.

Same with spinach and blueberries. You will have lots of alone time if you do.

Oh, the watermelon. My DD ate nearly an entire (small) watermelon by herself over the course of a day (various relatives fed her and she asked for 2+ servings each meal!). Who'd have thought something that is little more than water could have that unfortunate an effect??

One serve/slice of watermelon has a LOT of mannitol, Oligos-fructans, and excess fructose in it. A lot a lot. Mannitol is a sugar polyol that tastes sweet but isn't absorbed by the gut and provides food for the bacteria in your large intestine to turn into gas; fructose needs to be eaten with glucose or it won't be absorbed either, so excess fructose does the same thing; and oligo-saccharides are regarded by many people as good for you because they feed the 'good' bacteria in your gut but that can turn out to be too much of a good thing.

(I know this because I need to avoid all these things or else wow, unfortunate effects all right. )

Same with spinach and blueberries. You will have lots of alone time if you do.

Oh, the watermelon. My DD ate nearly an entire (small) watermelon by herself over the course of a day (various relatives fed her and she asked for 2+ servings each meal!). Who'd have thought something that is little more than water could have that unfortunate an effect??

One serve/slice of watermelon has a LOT of mannitol, Oligos-fructans, and excess fructose in it. A lot a lot. Mannitol is a sugar polyol that tastes sweet but isn't absorbed by the gut and provides food for the bacteria in your large intestine to turn into gas; fructose needs to be eaten with glucose or it won't be absorbed either, so excess fructose does the same thing; and oligo-saccharides are regarded by many people as good for you because they feed the 'good' bacteria in your gut but that can turn out to be too much of a good thing.

(I know this because I need to avoid all these things or else wow, unfortunate effects all right. )

I know many, many people who refer to watermelon as "nature's tastiest laxative"

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Meditate. Live purely. Quiet the mind. Do your work with mastery. Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine. ---Gautama Buddah

Since there's no "Told you so" thread I thought it will fit nicely here, because I had to really bite my tongue yesterday not to blurt it out to my SO, who waited until now, 4 days before his trip to the other end of the world, to book an hostel room. And was complaining that there wasn't much left, and only in pricier hostels .

I vowed to never actually do the "told you so/could have told you/now that wasn't very smart, was it?" since it never, ever helps and I would hate for someone to do it for me but gosh, what was he thinking!Valuable lesson learned, never leave him this responsibility for our vacations, and that I'm still able to speak 'other end of the world' (Brazil, I used to live there) to sort out his hostel reservation.

And since I'm already telling on him, he only has less than a fifth of his holiday planned (doesn't know what, when or how) ><.I could never travel like that, what if every airlines are booked for the next 3 weeks or when you get there all the hostels are full or closed or what if Godzilla?

I vowed to never actually do the "told you so/could have told you/now that wasn't very smart, was it?" since it never, ever helps and I would hate for someone to do it for me but gosh, what was he thinking!

And when you do find those words coming out of your mouth, your next thought is, 'Oh my diety, I'm my MOTHER.'

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After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice: If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.

I vowed to never actually do the "told you so/could have told you/now that wasn't very smart, was it?" since it never, ever helps and I would hate for someone to do it for me but gosh, what was he thinking!

And when you do find those words coming out of your mouth, your next thought is, 'Oh my diety, I'm my MOTHER.'

I believe I heard this song back in the 80s. The chorus goes something like:HELP! I'm turning into my mom; I'm turning into my dad!

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"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Common sense is not a gift, but a curse. Because thenyou have to deal with all the people who don't have it. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I did that once with salsa. I didn't feel like measuring, so I just started peeling cloves of garlic and tossing them in. I think I added like 20. It was painful to eat.

I was given a cookbook that had a cheddar/beer soup in it, as a wedding gift.

I don't tend to buy garlic often--I like garlic but I'm much more likely to scoop out the amount in the pre-minced jarred garlic or to use garlic salt than to actually buy a clove of garlic.

Cheddar-beer soup called for 1 clove of garlic. If you're a newbie cook and your new husband is helping you, 1 clove=/= 1 head.

It was inedible. *shudder*sadly enough, I've never felt inclined to try the recipe again

I had a friend who tried that once. When she was a Bride, she was making meatballs for her DH and made the 1 head=1 clove of garlic mistake. She also thought that dried herbs were less flavorful than fresh and added almost half a jar of oregano.

So far as I know, the marriage has survived.

Catching up, sorry.

Did I ever tell you guys of the Great Dorm Kitchen Oregano-Garlic Battle?

When I was in college and living in the dorms, a friend and I decided to collaborate on a spaghetti dinner, and set to work in the dorm's shared kitchen space - it was a longish room, with 2 kitchen setups, one by the window, the other by the door. We were in the one by the window.

She was a garlic fiend, I was an oregano fiend, and so we had a jar of each with us. As we're cooking, she sees me add a big handful of oregano, and, not realizing that I'd already added in a bunch of garlic powder. So she retaliates with the garlic powder. I retaliate with more oregano. And back and forth. By the time we sorted it all out, people in the hallway were getting contact high and we were the only two people who could eat the spaghetti.

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What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

My mother was a decent cook but pretty much ignorant of herbs and spices. An Italian friend told Mom her spaghetti sauce recipe and Mom wrote it down. For some reason, Mom heard the 'three cloves' but didn't hear the garlic. So when I was growing up, spaghetti in our house always co tai Ed three whole cloves but no garlic.

My mother was a decent cook but pretty much ignorant of herbs and spices. An Italian friend told Mom her spaghetti sauce recipe and Mom wrote it down. For some reason, Mom heard the 'three cloves' but didn't hear the garlic. So when I was growing up, spaghetti in our house always co tai Ed three whole cloves but no garlic.

It was still pretty good.

That's a "you-neek" take on traditional spaghetti seasoning. I wonder if one can even taste 3 cloves in a batch of spaghetti sauce.

We all know that one should never ask a strange woman "when is the baby due?" That's a common "yeah ... don't do that." For a uncommon twist, a lady told me (it felt more like a confrontation) it was wrong to tighten the girth on a pregnant horse and she was appalled that I was going to ride a "very pregnant" horse. At first I turned around wondering to whom she was addressing her comments. OK, that part was funny. But when I realized she was talking to me, I wondered where this pregnant horse was. <Forehead slap> D'oh! She thinks my horse is pregnant.

I told her, "She's not pregnant; She's fat." Even then the lady argued with me, "Are you sure she's not pregnant?" Well, yes I am sure. There isn't a horse on the ranch with any balls, so Misty is safe. Fat, but not pregnant. At that point, I got on my fat little pony and said, "I need to exercise her now so she doesn't get fatter."

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"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."