Gab, Currently XV

In a moment of insanity, I accepted a friend’s invitation to share a table at October Komiket. I also spent the next few days curbing a full-blown anxiety attack, because I’ve never been great at getting my work out there. I’ve been reintroducing myself to making fanart, something I haven’t done since college, since my most recent paintings are from 2015-2016.

Ngl, I’ve been having a lot of fun. Whenever I’m having a stressful day at work, I paint for about an hour or so after to decompress. It works for the most part, although I still feel like throwing up whenever I think about the con.

I actually feel more pressure for the con than I do for exhibits. Mainly because my goal for exhibits is exposure. Selling prints at a con is quantifiable. I will go home knowing exactly how much or how little my art has sold, and that shit is terrifying.

A particularly big set of waves brought me to the impact zone which led me to take a bad tumble along the shore break, which led to this. My board’s gonna need some intensive repair and my heart is breaking.

Tempted to just wait til North Swell before getting back into the water because South Swell’s always so fucking wild in Zambales and I am low-key traumatised and paranoid that I’m gonna break another board if I borrow while mine’s out of commission.

On the upside, I’ve learned that the 30-minute workouts I’ve been trying to do everyday have paid off quite a bit in the water. Endurance is still my waterloo though, because I hate cardio with a passion.