Thursday, June 29, 2006

Lime: The Bitch Sister That Won't Put Out

Answer this, margarita purists: if margarita premix is so evil, why is the process of squeezing enough limes for a decent-sized party so f'n hard?

On the invite for my last cocktail party I shunned premix like any good cocktail snob. Just like a "vodka martini" isn't a real Martini, a real margarita is not authentic unless freshly squeezed lime juice is the base. A no-brainer, right? But try doing it.

First off, I lack a proper electric juicer, so I'm stuck doing it by hand. And after the 8th lime squeezed, your arms feel wrenched and you want to give up. The taboo thought enters your head: maybe I should've just bought premix. NO, god dammit. You know fresh is better; it's axiomatic. So you slog on ...

At lime number 25, you look into your pitcher and realize there's only enough juice for fewer than three glasses. Christ. At some point you need help. In fact, it's a three person job if you're wanting more margaritas than for just you and your S.O.

You may not know it, but limes are small and dry. There's not much juice in them compared to lemons, and their innards are like green desert clay. A lemon is luscious---covered in thick, oily skin and full of wet fruit that keeps on giving. You only need a few lemons to get most cocktail jobs done. But the lime is the lemon's bitch sister that won't put out.

How god damn hard is it to make quality margarita premix? DC Drinks demands that the public should be able to obtain it. Just remember, there was once a time when we accepted coffee from a can as something drinkable.

Can't you buy lime juice in a glass bottle? Perhaps by the pint? Being a bit inebriated at the moment, I can't recall seeing it at my grocer's, but I know one can buy lemon juice in that manner. It's not a far strech to think lime juice would reside in a similar fashion. It seems like that would be a good middle ground.

Incidentally, I've found the most delectable martini cocktail garnir - pitted olives stuffed with onions - the best of both worlds. I won't accept anything else (at least until the jar is empty).

Look for limes that have thinner skins and fewer bumps. Also, the ones that are looking a little yellow or brown will give you more juice. I usually get between 1 and 2oz of juice out of a single lime.

A lime squeezer is the way to go. Even Bed Bath & Beyond carries them now! I don't know what I ever did without one. When I make homemade margaritas, I like to use half lemons/half limes. It has a slightly more piquant taste that balances nicely with the sweetness.

Screw it, I agree with you. Even with a reamer it's not worth it the friggin' effort. Beside, if you're making them right, you don't need that much pre-mix anyway, and they all taste the same after the first one. - Enjoying reading your blogs... thanks. -S

I use the juicer attachment on my tiny (1 pint) food processor, which was very cheap. That's pretty much all I use it for, lime juice and pesto. Saves a lot of work. But lime juice freezes pretty well; you would think someone would sell it that way.

I agree with all the above comments. I also don't cut my limes in half, I just take a little bit off the end and juice one whole lime at a time. And believe, at my bar we're pre-juicing over two gallons every day!

Skip the pre-mix and all the work to squeeze limes and head to the frozen juice section for some limeade. One can of limeade, five cans of water, 2 to 2 1/2 cans of tequila, 1/2 can of cointreau and various combinations of juice makes a party pleasing margarita with no effort

If you can find it - Santa Cruz Lime Juice works well when you need bulk juice. It's actually the only thing I have found that comes close. You can generally find it in Whole Foods and other such stores.

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