Women Should Cover Up When They’re Breastfeeding! Nope.

Women breastfeeding in public… now they’re even taking “brelfies” for all to see.

This article is going to be a very challenging read for some people. So take a deep breath and let’s do this.

If you’re feeling fragile, bookmark this article and come back to it later.

So, let me ask you something:

How do you react when you see a woman (or an image of a woman) breastfeeding her baby?

How do you feel when you see a woman breastfeeding her baby?

Think about it for a minute. Then put a name on those emotions.

Do you feel angry? Do you feel anxious? Guilt creeping in? Sadness or despair?

Instead of focusing on what’s right in front of you, focus for a minute on what thoughts and processes are going on inside your body. What messages are you telling yourself? What beliefs (stories) are you creating about others?

Now, are those stories factually true? Can you be certain for sure that it’s true? Or are they just assumptions and judgements based on your own reactions and feelings?

From a practical perspective, covering up a baby is like trying to cover up an octopus. But let’s go deeper. Religious and cultural reasons aside, here are the most common reasons why the members of the public (mostly women themselves) feel that breastfeeding women should cover-up — in no particular order:

1: My Husband/Significant Other Doesn’t Need It In His Face

“It’s really offensive when women whip their boobs out in front of my partner — he doesn’t need to see that, and I don’t want him to see that either.”

Why don’t you want him to see it? Are you worried he’s going to get off on it?

The thing is, it’s called breastfeeding, not nipplefeeding. He’s going to see more breast tissue on the beach, on the television (how about that Game of Thrones that’s gripping the world?), on the internet and in advertising. So, there are a few things to consider.

Perhaps you might discover that you feel insecure about your own breasts or body. Or perhaps you don’t like the idea of your partner seeing another woman’s breasts (what little you can see while she’s breastfeeding) because he behaves in ways that leave you feeling insecure.

For example, does he ogle or inappropriately comment on women’s bodies at other times? If not, than you are acting without any evidence that your partner is having a jolly good time watching other women breastfeed.

If he does behave badly, why are you in a relationship a person who is shredding your self esteem to the point of insecurity and paranoia? All for a man who has clearly not grown up emotionally. A woman should be able to trust her partner. When we don’t feel safe in relationships, we can behave in desperate ways.

I’m going to make a leap for a minute, but for good reason: another thing to consider is that one of the more obvious signs of someone being hooked on porn is that they look at other women (and you) differently. Instead of seeing a woman, they see sexual objects. They tend to blatantly ogle, right in front of you. Yet, you may think there is nothing is wrong with porn. You might like to look into how addictive porn is and how it easily and quickly it escalates. Read up on all the research at Fight The New Drug and Your Brain On Porn. Think it’s over the top? Read this boy’s story. Stories like it are growing at a rapid pace.

Why do I even mention porn? I truly believe it’s played a huge role in the shift we’re experiencing. Women are suffering in silence thinking it’s a ‘man thing’ and something to be endured. But breasts have become over-sexualised thanks to marketing, media and porn, which is a shame. Not just for the men, but for women who have become paranoid about breasts being used as intended.

None of these things have anything to do with how a woman chooses to feed her baby. Don’t hate the breastfeeding mother. Channel that passion and energy into changing the status quo. Also, see our article on the sexualisation of breasts: what caused it?

2: My Children Don’t Need To See That!

“Gees, I have kids here, can’t you cover up? They don’t need to see your breasts, it’s nudity for goodness sake!”

Kids are like little sponges — their brains are geared to learn at a much faster rate than us adults. The first three years are especially formative, shaping who we’ll become. What we tell them and what we teach them, they take literally.

Considering breastfeeding rates are dropping around the globe and we’re less likely to encounter breastfeeding everyday, what would you rather teach them:

Most women bottle feed their babies; breastfeeding should be hidden and ashamed of

Some women breastfeed, some women bottlefeed. Both are fine but cover up if you breastfeed

Breastfeeding is the normal way to feed your baby, isn’t it wonderful seeing women breastfeed? Breastfeeding is very challenging for some mothers and babies, and that’s okay. Formula is there for those who need it. We’re so lucky women have options for their babies!

It’s your choice what you decide to teach your children about feeding babies. But know that everything they see is an opportunity to teach them. I think the best thing to do is teach our children to be open-minded (don’t worry, their brains wont fall out), and let them make their own decisions, rather than just let them take on our stuff.

3: She’s Just Seeking Attention!

“All these women posting selfies or breastfeeding in public are doing so for attention! All they want is people to look at them!”

There’s a belief that goes something like this: the quirks we find irritating in others (and what we think about others) is an exact mirror reflection into the inner workings of ourselves — no matter if we realise it or not.

Are you feeling a lack of attention from your significant other? Or from the world in general?

Do you feel insignificant?

Because you’re choosing to believe something that simply isn’t true. When you choose to believe something, you suffer — from your own thoughts. Do all breastfeeding mothers post selfies because they want attention? Do you firmly believe yes? Because if you do, it’s not only a generalisation, but it’s also a delusion.

I’ve taken photos breastfeeding my daughter. While I didn’t post them on Facebook specifically, I did share them. Why? Because when I look at them, I am filled with SO much love for my daughter. I felt so happy to be with her, right there in that moment where we are connected both physically and emotionally. And it passes by SO fast.

You see, mothers who breastfeed get a rush of the hormone oxytocin, which is the hormone of love, bonding and connection. Mother Nature has cleverly wired us so that we will feed and protect our babies, by giving us this yummy dose of feel good hormones. It puts us in a state of love, connection and pride.

I don’t know of any mothers who post brelfies with the motive to piss off other mothers. Nor am I aware of a Facebook group set up solely for that purpose. And seriously, we’re really busy mothers. We don’t have the time to make it our mission.

Brelfies are a feeling, not just a photo. And trust me, we absolutely do not want people to stare at us or get off on us breastfeeding. It’s simply a snapshot into a moment that will one day, sadly be over forever. Just like you have treasured snapshots of pregnancy, birth or parenting, breastfeeding represents a special moment in time to us. We wouldn’t ask you to stop posting your most treasured photos.

And yes, bottlefeeding moments can be just as beautiful. Wear and share them with pride too.

4: I Don’t Need To See THAT!

Oh, you mean breastfeeding? On the contrary, maybe you do need to see breastfeeding.

Does your brain overload with raging hot fury when you watch documentaries of tribal women on the television? Are the tribe horrified? No, because it’s how it’s done and everyone just gets on with it.

Sometimes, some people report seeing other women with a whole boob out, not caring who sees her. These boob-out women are the minority, because so many women anxiously cover up every inch they can, but in either case… Just. Look. Away.

When you continue to look, you grow the problem in your mind — you feel more upset, angry and disturbed. It’s not that hard unless you let yourself get hooked into the untruths you’re telling yourself. Just like anything else you don’t like the look of, you look away and move on.

There’s no need for drama. It’s just a mama feeding her baby. If she doesn’t feed her baby, it will eventually will lead to crying (which is a late hunger signal), then everyone will no doubt take offense to the crying. She cannot win.

Something to note is people have grown up with varying messages about feeding babies. Our parents are very influential as to our belief systems as we grow up. Sometimes we don’t even know why we think, feel and act the way we do. This is because early experiences shape who we become.

Consider your parent’s experiences with infant feeding. What did they do? How did they feel about it?

It can be a huge insight into the way we operate, and why we do what we do when we speak to our parents. Have a conversation with them today, you just might be surprised.

5: It’s Disgusting!

Breastfeeding is not disgusting for a baby. Nor is it disgusting for a mother. Nor do people find it disgusting to see array of animals that feed their babies in nature — we even see it as cute and adorable! Why?

Because our feelings and emotions aren’t being triggered.

It’s not about the act of feeding our young. It’s the ridiculous stories we’re telling ourselves about other women that are simply not true.

If you think breastfeeding is dirty or disgusting, ask yourself how you feel about your own body. Is it possible that you don’t feel comfortable with your body? Is low self esteem is hampering your thoughts? Are you basing your views on breastfeeding due to outdated religious or cultural messages in the past? What were you taught about breastfeeding when growing up?

At the end of the day, I am simply asking you to question your thoughts.

Only then will you have any real answers and understanding, rather than judgements and assumptions. No-one likes those. Especially when it’s about themselves, eh?

And remember, when you’re fighting against something, you’re giving it more energy and keeping the drama going. It’s a snowball effect.

Think about the person you would be and how you would feel if you didn’t believe the thought that breastfeeding women should cover up. Imagine seeing a breastfeeding woman, without the judgement and without the thoughts you usually associate with it. No crazy self talk.

What do you see now? Can you possibly see a beautiful mother lovingly feeding her adorable baby? Because that’s what’s right in front of you! Isn’t it perfect?

No? Well if you’ve gotten through this article and still feel offended, then see if you can answer the 4 questions featured here. Click the button to answer the questions… it will change your life — not just how you feel about breastfeeding.

Last Updated: January 27, 2016

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Kelly Winder is the creator of BellyBelly.com.au, a writer, doula (trained in 2005), and a mother of three awesome children. She's passionate about informing and educating fellow thinking parents and parents-to-be, especially about all the things she wishes she knew before she had her firstborn. Kelly is also passionate about travel, tea, travel, and animal rights and welfare. And travel.

50 comments

I love this. I was made to feel ashamed even with a cover, which made me hop on the normalizing bandwagon full force. Another argument I’ve heard is that I should pump before I leave the house. A) I usually do. B) It’s usually not enough. C) Sometimes I have to be away from home longer than expected. D) When I’m full again, I’m in pain & I need to feed to relieve. E) If he’s hungry & I don’t feed him, that’s neglect.

I am all about breastfeeding! I have now exclusively breastfed 4 children! 🙂 I do still cover myself in public. If i’m in a room full of women(at church nursery), I ask if it makes anyone uncomfortable before I nurse without covering. I think it’s polite to be considerate of others and how they feel. And honestly, I do wish some people would be considerate about how they dress when they’re in public as well. 😉 I would not look down on mothers that choose to nurse uncovered though, either! I think it’s a preference! 🙂

Still don’t want to see it.
want to see me shagging in public? That’s natural too and people get a rush of hormones then too
it’s not some 3 rd world country where there are are no options
my choice is that I do not wish to see this . so why is your choice ‘better’ than mine?

Why did you even reply to this. This is talking about breastfeeding not having sex in public. Your trying awfully hard to compare the two. It’s like trying to compare two completely different subjects, like Music and Vegans. Get down off your high horse or donkey what ever it is you sex fiens fiends are riding these days, and think before you speak. This article said nothing of the US being a 3rd world country, and 3rd world countries do have options. I do not know where you get that from? Do you ever watch anything educational, or are you too busy “Keeping Up With The Kardashians.”
What is so hard about not looking? If you don’t want to see it, don’t look! It’s so simple…. so simple. Some people get all upset at PDA, public displays of affection, is what it stands for just in case you weren’t sure. If a couple is making out, or hardcore making out and I didn’t want to see it because I didn’t agree with what they were doing. I’d just turn and look the other way, why? Because it’s not hurting me. Now if a Grown Man starting sucking on a woman’s breast in public, then I could see why people would would be throwing a fit. BUT we are not. We are talking about Mother’s feeding their infants the way GOD INTENDED

You obviously didn’t read the article. Breastfeeding isn’t engaging in sexual activity…. Nasty. It’s feeding your baby the way nature intended. EATING. But you sound like some one who should cover when they eat anyway

Fredina, you obviously didn’t read the article. You think sexual activity is nasty? What about point number 5 above? All the same points apply to sex. Just as breastfeeding is a necessary part of a mother’s relationship to her baby and is necessary for a society to function, sex is a necessary part of a husband’s and wife’s relationship and is necessary for a society to function. Just as feeding your baby is the way nature intended, so is having sex. How could you disagree with that? I’m not saying that sex should be done in public or that breastfeeding shouldn’t, just that the reasons you give are poor and shaming people who have sex: including the vast majority of mothers.

The fact you’re.comparing fedding a baby in public to stripping off and downright f***ing is the thing that is ridiculous.
Sex is natural yes but you do not HAVE to have sex right then and there. When a baby is hungry, the baby is HUNGRY and needs to be FED and the longer younwait, the more upset and harder it is to settle said little baby. I will feed my infant when and where he wants it. The fact a man can walk around d shirtless yet a woman is shamed for feeding her baby is f***ed. Anatomically the only difference is behind womens nipples are milk ducts and fatty tissue. who gives a f***. I feel sad that you do.

I breastfed my daughter for 2 years and 1 month. I breastfed her publicly and everywhere from the car, store, museums, pumpkin patch, beach, ect. My baby NEVER used a bottle. I breastfed her during the winter, spring, summer, and fall but not one time did I feel the need to whip out my DD breast for everyone to see. It was OUR bonding time. I cover my breast and still made eye contact with her and held her close to me. I get tired of articles like this because it is unnecessary! You can cover, grasp, and nurse your baby. Sorry but people are sick. A bonding moment with you and your child turns into a peep show for the world to see when it is something special between a mother and child. Learn to value yourself and body. Do not publicly display everything.

PREACH!!! Thank you for this post. Made me happy that someone feels the way I do. I loved breastfeeding, I always covered up, but I did not care about breastfeeding in public, because if my daugther was hungry – she should get some food.
Seriously, should breastfeeding women not be allowed to go outside because other people can’t stop looking??? CRAZY.

Well that’s your opinion Camille and Kate. Jus remember opinions are like butt holes, every one has one.
We aren’t born into this world with a bottle in our hands and clothes covering our bodies. Only Sick and Twisted individuals take something as natural as breastfeeding and trying turning it into something sexual or disgusting. People like that, like you are beyond ridiculous. I’m not saying I’m the type of woman to purposely go out in public and take my shirt completely off and breastfeed my child like it’s normal. I cover my self, but there are times where I forget my cover and I have no choice but to feed my baby in public. And yes I lift my breast into my child’s mouth but all you see is nothing more than what you would see from a woman wearing a low cut t-shirt.
So if my child is hungry, I’m not going to deny them milk because “you don’t want to see that”
because believe me there are plenty of things people don’t want to see, yet they can turn the other cheek. I guess we are just more evolved 😉

Exactly! I think breastfeeding is awesome but it should be between a mother and child not a mother her child and the world. And kids sometimes do not need to see that. The best example I can give personally is being McDonalds with a five year old child who in his lifetime had been through serious abuse and neglect while some children can see that and understand it due to his past circumstances he could not. He also needed time to be a kid rather than the sponge this article talks about and having to explain issues like that to that child was not in any shape form or fashion good for him. Yes mothers can do what they want but please be considerate of others.

I wasn’t able to breastfeed my children. I am sooo proud of my daughters-in-laws and Grand-daughters for embracing this time with my little ones. None of them are choosing to #expose# themselves for the sake of giving a peep show. They are doing a wonderful natural way of giving love and attention to their children! I say YOU GO GIRLS!! If you don’t like it don’t look!!!

I think breastfeeding is wonderful and breastfeeding in public is often necessary! My 5th child does not like to be covered when nursing so I usually don’t. He gets hot and squirms more than usual making it difficult to hold onto him. The problem I have is when moms feel the need to pull their breast out of the top if their shirts, exposing their entire breast! Why??

I agree. i have no problem with bf in public and have done it many times but I always wore clothing that made it easy to nurse from under my shirt (lifting the bottom of the blouse or unbuttoning from the bottom instead of the top). We used to call it discreet nursing. No issue if pulling down the neckline of your top is the only way to access the breast, but I sure wish mamas would think about it when they choose their nursing garments. Perhaps the exposure has opened the discussion and made bf more out in the open, but it is something to consider.

Because they feel like they are tangled in their clothes if they do that whole double shirt, pull one up pull one down thing. Also baby gets annoyed and distracted by that top shirt landing on their face. I am a pull my whole boob out the neck of my shirt mom. I cover my breast with my hand if baby isn’t latched. If I do the double shirt pull up (because all my easy tops are in the wash) it takes me longer and if baby is already fussing I feel flustered, I feel more obvious (like, look at me I’m adjusting all my shirts so I can breastfeed) and like I said, baby get distracted by the top shirt, and it takes longer to latch because she keeps trying to latch thru the shirt. By just whipping out the whole boob I feel like I’m actually being more discreet because it’s faster and easier, unless someone is staring to begin with most won’t notice what is going on.

I think the point that Moms need to think about is that not all babies are the same. My middle child refused a cover from 7 months on. It was like containing an octopus under that cover. I ended up exposing more just trying to keep him covered. He ended up being fine with the shirt pull-up method. My youngest accepts the cover most of the time, but doesn’t nurse well with it on. He can’t have fabric touch him, and ironically has gotten more picky the older he gets (He’s 19 months.) So much for “training” him to accept something. Some babies just won’t accept *any* fabric touching them, no matter how often you try. I think all Moms try to do what they feel is best to be discreet, and sometimes that may mean pulling their breast out of the top of their shirt, because they have a picky baby and that’s just how it has to be done. As long as your not taking out your breast, pausing to make eye contact with as many people as possible, and then making a grand spectacle of latching your child, I think you’re okay.

I really can’t just slip my breast from under the bra. It’s extremely uncomfortable and it’s too low for my baby to latch on. So I have to go up and over to feed him correctly. If I could, I would but honestly it just gets to hot and sweaty for me and he will fuss and fuss because the nipple is vertical instead of diagonal to his mouth.

Breast is a sexual part of your body, just because you are breastfeeding doesn’t mean that it is ok to show it out in public. Her piont is just because something is natural doesn’t mean it is ok to be indiscreet about. I am not against breastfeeding, instead I try to encourage other moms to do it but I think it is very selfish of many moms when they pull out all their breast out infront of others, we all know that breast excite the opposite gender, and I would not like to be the reason why another men lust after somebody else beside their wive. Also I want my children to know that there is always a right way to do things in life. You don’t have to put a huge blanket over but just try to be as discrete as you can with how much breast your show.

Breasts aren’t sexual organs. A woman’s extra breast tissue is nothing more than a secondary sex characteristic, the same as a male’s facial hair. The sexualization of breasts is a societal ideal that is relatively new and primarily Western.

If you are saying that breasts are sexual because some people find sexual gratification from breast stimulation? There are several parts of the human body that aren’t considered sexual organs but might bring sexual gratification to a person. Should we then cover all of those potential erogenous zones while in public? No open toed shoes. Everyone must wear turtle necks and cover their earlobes.

My point is that you view breasts as sexual because someone (or society) told you they were sexual. That’s not a belief held by everyone.

Why not teach your children that breastfeeding is natural and that different women do it in different ways? Some choose to cover, some don’t.

So you’re saying you’ve never had a sexual encounter where a man enjoyed looking at your breasts and was excited to take off your shirt and do so? Breasts are sexual because society has made them sexual. Whether that’s right or wrong does not mean that we can magically make everyone not view them that way when we see them. The open breastfeeding movement is relatively new, and so yes, there will be people who see a breast and the first place their mind goes is sex.

It’s really not our problem you can’t control yourself! Our only concern is to feed our children! Breast are and will always be first and foremost a food supply to our young so maybe when you and many other who have commented grow up and realise this then the world will be a much better place because I certainly wouldn’t have stopped feeding or put a blanket over my children’s head to help you feel more comfortable! It’s not about you!

You act as if men do not have the thought capacity to control themselves. A breast is only sexual because YOU make it sexual. They are not there for sex, they are there for nourishing a child. My baby’s father believes breastfeeding is beautful, and always tells me how cute we are when she is eating. Men do have the ability to think. Making us cover up our nipples while theirs are exposed is insulting.

I’m sure your baby’s father has also enjoyed your breasts in a sexual situation. I am just stating it how it is. They are intended for nourishing children, but society has sexualized them. Men oftentimes get excited to see them in a sexual setting, and therefore can be reminded of a sexual setting when they see one. It’s not that they don’t have the capacity to think- it’s that that as I said, there mind might go to a sexual place before they check themselves. Just as we also can hear/see something and be reminded of a different use for it via a former memory.

A man may also be reminded of a sexual situation when he sees a woman in a short skirt and heels at the office or in a bathing suit at the beach… and neithe
r one of these is as necessary as feeding a child… so should we shame women who dress up for work or who have the audacity to wear a bikini at the beach? And for the record, as a mother of a nine year old girl and a three year old boy, I hope that they see women breast feeding their babies everywhere they go! And they will also sew their mommy telling the breast feeding mom thand you for breast feeding her baby! 🙂

Let me preface this by saying I have no problem with women breastfeeding in public. I do get a little uncomfortable, however, with the women who bare all to feed their child. I was talking to one the other day (breast completely out of shirt, no bra on) and the baby kept coming unlatched, and squirming around. There were long moments where her entire areola and nipple were exposed- way more than a low cut shirt shows. Her entire boob, was right there, out in the open for me and all the men passing by to see. I don’t want to shame anyone for breastfeeding, especially not in public, but I think there needs to be a balance.

I understand it made you uncomfortable seeing a woman’s full breast exposed. Your comment here:

“…out in the open for me and all the men passing by to see.”

Interesting that you made it about “you and men”, rather than everyone. What happens if men see the boob? Serious question, but I am wanting to understand your thought process. What could happen if all the men saw a woman’s breast in public?

Society has sadly sexualized the woman’s breasts but not men’s. For quite a few men, boobs are what they are most attracted to sexually on a woman. There was one particular gentleman walking by that I felt sorry for because you could tell it threw him off to see that and he was embarrassed by his thoughts. There are men who are very sexually attracted to boobs, but because they are gentleman, don’t ogle at women for a reason. They might glance at cleavage accidentally but then purposefully look away and make sure to focus on the woman’s face to show they are interested in her as a person, and not sexualizing her. However, when it’s entirely exposed, it doesn’t give these men much of an option of not accidentally looking and having their thoughts go in that direction for a second before they can check their thought process. I’m not saying it’s right, but it is how it is.

So them getting practice at checking their thought process is a bad thing? I would think if their natural thought process is to view a woman as a sexual object if they see a bit of boob…. then some work on that would be a good, not a bad thing. Yep it might make them a little uncomfortable. Changing our thought processes usually does involve that.

Men shouldn’t show their nipples for all of the women to see, then. Some days I get tired of seeing a man’s nipple with hairy rings around them. But I have no choice when it’s hot out and my neighbor wants to mow the grass..such hypocrates..

I agree. But then again for some reason society hasn’t sexualized men’s nipples like they have women’s. It’s common to heart of preteen boys googling pictures of boobs, but how often do you hear of girls doing the same? Men’s nipples and women’s nipples are viewed as two entirely different things, when the only difference should be one provides food and the other doesn’t. But somehow women showing their boobs is equivalent to a man exposing himself, and therefore it’s a bit of a shock when you initially see it, whereas it’s not shocking to see a man’s nipples.

So women shouldn’t do it beause society is stupid? I’m sorry if you’re too stupid to understand that they aren’t sexual, it’s your falult.
I understand that you can’t help but feel uncomfortable sometimes because of how they’re sexualized but women/men shouldn’t coverup because of that.

I’m a little confused why this article has three adverts for ways to cover up whilst breast feeding? This seems like mixed messages. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think there is anything wrong with a mum using these products if it makes them feel comfortable, but isn’t the point of the article that we shouldn’t feel we have to cover up?

Those are Google based ads which are based on a user’s browsing history or the topic of the article (as well as location, I am currently in Cambodia so don’t see what everyone else does), they aren’t strategically placed there by BellyBelly. If you could please send me the links to the ads, so I am able to assess and ban them, it’s the only way I can stop it. Please email to [email protected]. The article — what we actually write — is what we stand for.

I’m a breastfeeding mom and agree with the gist of this article. The most annoying part about breastfeeding in public is the awkward comments and the getting hit on (and I feed my child covered!) However I do disapprove of how some people take advantage of the “breastfeeding anywhere” principle and would like to point out that there are still times and places where maybe you should be … a little more modest. I was in a small, crowded Starbucks the other day and a woman took off her shirt and unhooked her bra and let her boobs hang. THere was a really awkard silence, and a lot of people got up and left because at the time her baby was still secured in a car seat. Everyone was trying to look elsewhere as she chatted with her friend, letting her boobs literally just bounce around without any baby in her arms. After what was probably only five minutes but what felt like an hour as I was unfortuante enough to be seated looking her direction, she finally made a move to unbuckle her baby but then she just held him. Still chatting. It was very awkard and uncomfortable for everyone, as she wasn’t even feeding the baby for the majority of the time. So, yes, breastfeed in public, but maybe just don’t leave your boobs out of your shirt for a million years. I’ve seen many breastfeeding mothers and their children, and most of the time it feels natural, but in this case I think she was even winking at guys as they went past her. I had literally nowhere to look. My husband was asking what my problem was, and all i could say was, “how about a staring contest?????”

As a sexual assault victim, I do get offended by non covered public breastfeeding and it would be mature to cover up. You can get the same simulation by a man sucking on your nipples that’s why I’m so sensitive to it, it brings me back to the bad moment, it’s horrible to make any sexual assault victim to feel like that!

It must be very hard to have triggering images in front of you like that. I’m sorry you had to go through what you did — I wish no human had such an experience.

Breastfeeding is a natural, important function, so asking everyone who breastfeeds to hide away would be an impossible task. Do you have access to some good support or a highly skilled therapist to work through those feelings? It would be very difficult to go through every day fearing seeing breastfeeding.

I don’t need a therapist. I just wish people had more respect and decentcey for sexual assault victims. I don’t care if you are breastfeeding just cover up it’s simple. Sex is normal we do that in private, we need to have sex to create life. We as people have morals animals breastfeed in public because well they are animals. If I see someone going to the bathroom, screwing, breastfeeding without covering up I might as well relate them to animals.

I’m so sorry that a natural, beautiful thing like Breastfeeding has been ruined for you by some horrible person. Maybe seeing more women not covering up will help you though, to understand that there’s nothing sexual about breasts or breastfeeding. And again, you can look away. In fact I expect people not to look when I get my baby to latch on. Yes, it would be impossible to ask every women to cover up. to me, covering up is just supporting the idea that it shouldn’t be done in public, and that it’s tasteless to see someone using there breast to breast feed, it’s like people want to keep breasts strictly for sex, and it’s not!

I’m getting married in a couple of weeks and my mother told me I need to cover up while bf’ing during the reception dinner. She told me it would not look nice to bf in a wedding dress! I asked what was the diff between a wedding dress or regular dress bf’ing? She said people would be uncomfortable. We have a total of 16 guests all family and close friends…

How can I make her understand that I wouldn’t be covering up the day b4 or after socialising with the same people? How do I make her understand I’m doing nothing wrong? I feel like she’s trying to push her insecurities of bf’ing onto me! TIA

That’s her opinion. I’ve seen some beautiful photography of brides (and bridesmaids) breastfeeding their babies 🙂 It’s very special, do it! It can be hard with someone we love and respect tells us otherwise, but be proud to put your baby before someone’s opinion or discomfort. All of us need to get more comfortable with breastfeeding. It’s normal.

I’d just explain to her that that’s her opinion and that’s ok for her to have that opinion but it’s your wedding and your baby and you will feed your baby whenever, wherever and however you like! If she doesn’t like it then that’s her problem, don’t let her make it yours x

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