About us and what we're looking for

About Us: We love all sorts of sex: swinging, internet chat (IRC, AIM or Y!), webcam chat, voyeurism, skinnydipping, outdoor sex, sexy photography and exhibitionism. Watching and being watched by another couple is a big turn on for us BOTH. We have no interest in entertaining solo singles for this in person, so please don't ask!

We met for the first time on December 27, 1998. To most of you that means we were in the same place at the same time. Well, welcome to the 21st Century. We met in a cybersex video chat conference room on the internet. Yes, we are two of those webcam weirdos. We spent a LONG time just being friends. We shared our thoughts and dreams and one of us (or both of us) avoided the obvious and wouldn't say YES to meeting in person. On June 9, 2001 at the restored Revolutionary War Village at Waterloo New Jersey we finally met. It was kismet and we have been inseparable ever since. We were married in May 2002.

We are a soft swing/soft swap ONLY couple looking for fun times and sexy play and more with other like minded couples, 'safe sex' a must. Dinner, drinks and 'times out on the town' are a BIG plus, but not a must requirement. We play together ONLY, never separately. We like large parties but also have enjoyed many quiet times with smaller groups or a couple. Solo single guys PLEASE do NOT contact us for 3somes as we will only turn you away. When we swing we prefer that the woman is bisexual as hotdi and I both love the play that results of it. When required hotdi can be straight for ladies that find bisexual action unpleasant. Some of our best swinging experiences have been as a sixsome (3 couples together - MMM/FFF) at a swing club/party with friends. We enjoy some lighter kinks too like: sexy photography (non-close-ups), sex in the great outdoors and nights out where the 'action' is in view, loving and playful (not x rated) while 'out on the town'.

We want to try at some point in the future hotel room exhibitionism, same room sex and bi play for the ladies while the guys (couples only) watch. We want to try 'Same room' (or blanket outdoors) sex again with other couples that doesn't necessarily end up in swinging play. hotdi wants to try to have sex on the beach again at our local nude beach. We tried it once in Vermont at the nude beach there and it was hot!

OUR definitions and a rule or two:

Some may feel having rules is limiting, our page on Why have swinging rules? is our explanation for why we have them. Below we tried to spell out what we do and don't want to be totally clear. What do all those sexy acronyms aka Common Swinging Terminology means that people use? For the rest of you, read on:

Couple - We define a couple as one male and one female person that are either married (to each other) or in a long term committed relationship (with each other). We are not interested in anyone who has one partner they live with and another that they play with (fuck buddies), especially not any $ for sex professionals or dates!

No Threesomes - As a separate meeting alone comprising only 3 people NOT at an organized party. We do play with individuals at organized swingers parties of four or more people (MMFF or similar). Also, we do NOT go to swing clubs that admit single males ever, don't ask!

First meeting is G rated - We meet in a public place as a FOURSOME only. If you and your mate can't make the meeting, please have the presence of mind to cancel or reschedule ahead of time. If you show up ALONE the entire conversation will consist of us saying "goodbye" to you. We do this to eliminate solo single guys scamming a couples meeting and then trying to turn the meeting into a threesome. We don't care what the excuse is about your mate not being available, if you show up without rescheduling you're off our list of potential play partners FOREVER.

Soft swing - Also known as soft swap. We feel that it's important for all of us to have the same definition, to avoid any confusion or disappointment. Our definition is: full oral sex (to the point of climax), oral/digital penetration of the vagina and bodily touching. Yes, hotdi does swallow! This is WITHOUT vaginal penetration of a male penis in a woman whom is not his partner. Quite a few say: "Soft swinging to us is NO oral between partners. Women can play but Men can only WATCH."

Full swing - Also known as full swap. Our definition is: all of Soft Swing WITH vaginal penetration of a male penis in a woman whom is not his partner.

Open swinging - We define this as having sex with another couple with all present in the same room. We will ONLY do open swing.

Closed swinging or key club swing - This is where wives/motel room keys are swapped and the resulting M/F couples head away from their respective mates to different rooms. We will NOT do this!

Swinging separately - We will NOT do this. Take us as a couple, together, or not at all.

No Solo Single males! - We realize some couples like to give solo single males the privilege of swinging with them, but we don't, it's just our preference, OK? Also SOLO (alone, without a female partner present) single guys have, in our experience, quite often pushed our limits and/or broke our rules. We've also had too many responses from solo single guys 'posing' i.e. acting in a way to deceive the other persons into thinking he's the couple he's falsely portraying. We don't care how big, that you promise to follow all rules, that you're a great a lover or any other what you feel is a compelling reason for us to change our stance. With Hotdi being very bisexual and Hoople being a 'breast man' solo single guys are several bits of 'equipment' deficient for what we BOTH require!!! This goes double for solo single bi males!

NO Reluctant partners - We will NOT swing with a couple when it's obvious that one of the people is a 'ticket' to get into couple's events or meet with us. A 'ticket' - a person brought along to fill out the 'couple' requirement of a couples only event or meeting. Many times the 'ticket' never knows this as the person bringing the them somehow 'forgot' to mention that they're going to a swinging event/meeting. BOTH partners MUST be equally interested or at least open to trying it on a temporary basis. We are not interested in 'helping' you win over a totally reluctant partner that has stated ABSOLUTELY NO to any form of swinging. We've developed a knack of sensing these scenarios up front pretty well and we WILL ASK if we're suspicious. If discovering any of this 'hidden agenda' we will then leave before anyone gets even close heading to the place where we might get naked!

What we don't want:

To most that have read fully the above this section may seems redundant, but there are some solo single guys that somehow feel that they still have a chance of sorts as they feel they still 'fit' our requirements.

Play alone/separately - NO!

Threesomes - NO!

Gang Bangs - NO!

BDSM - NO!

Heavy smokers - NO!

Heavy Drinkers - NO! As it's kinda difficult to get a hardon when you're trashed! We do socialize with non-drinkers.

We both have IM but Hotdi now blocks all Yahoo! ID's NOT on her list. Read her post on this topic on our blog. Short take: there are a large mass of clueless guys who are too crude, assumptive and/or abusive to ever meet us, they ruined it for the rest of you.