7 Resources you can use to Fight Pornography

Pornography is one of the biggest issues facing many Christians, male and female, today. Over the past few weeks the issue of pornography has come up over and over again in pastoral conversations that I have had. I also have had different friends in ministry asking me about dealing with this dreaded issue in the lives of their people.

How do you deal with pornography if you are addicted to it?

How do you help someone else in their addiction to pornography?

The following are some resources that you might use in your fight:

Here are some videos about dealing with porn addiction that you should watch:

In this one Don Carson talks about temptation but the example he uses is pornography

John Piper has a few clips about dealing with pornography. One about unbelief and porn addiction. In this one John Piper is talking to a bunch of youth about pornography. Both are fantastic!

In this one John Piper, Tim Keller and Don Carson talks about how the gospel and accountability conquers the sin of Pornography.

If you struggle with pornography you need to get some kind of monitoring software. I use Xwatch Pro which costs 7 dollars a month. You can get the free version here

Mark Driscoll has written a book called Porn again Christian. It is very blunt and very frank but very good.

Pornography looks so good and yet it never delivers what it advertises it will. It promises gratification but that gratification is quick and shallow and ultimately it leaves people empty. But more than that, when we look at porn, even free porn, we are playing our part in the victimization of the women and men who do porn. These men and women are created in the image of God and therefore should be loved and respected. And because porn distorts our self image as well as our view of sex and other people we are alspo destroying our lives. But most of all God hates porn and we should too.

The answer, as the guys say in the various videos, is not to give yourself a list of rules. If you are trapped in this sin you don’t need another list of do’s and don’ts, you need to realise that your greatest joy will not be found in sex but in Jesus.

When realize that, and this truth becomes central to your being, you will have overcome pornography.

6 Comments

Just because porn’s gratification is shallow, why do you think it leaves people empty?

I’d also like to point out that the only legal porn being made is between consenting adults. And if you take the time to listen to what they say, they don’t feel victimised at all.

Maybe the reason so many Christians feel like they have an addiction to porn is because even a healthy attitude towards sex is considered a no-no. A bit like someone who’s been forcing themselves to stay away from chocolate periodically losing it and gorging themselves on the stuff. I think if you do away with that unhealthy outlook on sex, you might not have such an unhealthy attitude towards porn.

Hey JayCee, I appreciate your comments,and would like to try and answer them with some of my own.

Maybe the best place to start is to say that I’m a Christian and I love sex; I have it as often as I can and take great pleasure in it.

In the bible we see that God created sex, he said it was good, and gave it as a gift to the people he created. It’s not just for making babies, but also for pleasure.

I would say that the bible encourages a very healthy view of sex, and that part of this is that God designed sex to be something great and wonderful. God designed sex to be something that deepens a relationship; that brings you closer to the other person, and develops trust and emotional intimacy. We see sex as something very important and amazing, and therefore that a healthy view of sex is one that is founded in a strong and stable relationship.

This is why we see sex by yourself, or ‘vicarious sex’ through porn as something far less than what God intended for it. When you use porn, you devalue sex, and cheapen it.

To use your chocolate analogy, it’s like having the option of enjoying a rich dark chocolate, with many complex layers of flavour, from strong and bold to delicate and lingering, but instead choosing to gorge on cheap white chocolate that’s basically just made out of sugar. Sure, there’s something to be said for the sweetness of it, but it’s less than chocolate can and should be. You can eat it several times a day and call it a healthy appreciation of chocolate, but you’re missing out. Not only that, but the more you eat cheap white chocolate, the less you are able to appreciate the good stuff: your tastes change and you’re no longer after complexity and depth, just the sugar hit.

My experience of porn (and I’ve had a bit of it, regretfully), is the same. It is shallow; and your tastes do change. It cheapens the whole experience of sex: instead of sex being a complex experience that deepens and develops a relationship, it becomes about a cheap and quick pleasure hit. It does leave you empty, and it can’t fulfil the basic human need for depth and intimacy in a relationship. I’m not saying that a certain pleasure can’t be found in viewing porn or masturbating, but at the end of it all there is a flat, emptiness. On the other hand, in a strong, stable (married) relationship, sex leaves you with a lingering affection and tenderness that contributes to a relationship as it is intended to do.

I guess Christians don’t disagree with you that a healthy view of sex is needed, but we do disagree on exactly what healthy looks like.

Western culture seems to be saying that healthy equals quantity, but we would argue that healthy equals quality (often involving quantity :P).

I totally agree to you sir that we do not need to have “to do list” in order to fight pornography. Thank you for reminding me that experiencing a joyful relationship with Jesus is the best way (i believe the only genuine and best way) to break the grip of this sin that brought slavery to many Christians. May God bless you always and help you in your ministry in advocating this fight against pornography:-)

I am a sexologist and therapist. We see the relational and individual effect (including sexual dysfunctions) that porn has. I have covered this in a chapter of my book Teen Sex: By the Book: [fervr.net/teen-sex-by-the-book]