a blog about a girl learning to juggle wifery, mom'ing, my self & share MY truths one day at a time!

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Key Strokes

I use to unfold the layers of a day by writing. I'd shed each moment {happy, frustrating, funny, stressful, joyous} with each key stroke and then it would be done. I would be free to let today fly from my heart and be set to enjoy the moments, the days that followed. Lately, I can't even hear myself think let alone write. I'm exhausted and busy. I'm overcome with change, so much change that I can't settle myself into the moment but I'm on fast forward. My email box is something I get through. Facebook is something I do to space out. I'm on autopilot and I'm longing to S L O W down.It's hard to "complain" about how fast pace and draining life feels at the moment when all that is fast paced and draining about it are beautiful blessings but I am tired now. I don't know how to cope with the disconnect of my own heart but I feel the girl that panics over buying a sweater, the girl that needs to write in order to be breathing {not just taking breaths}, the girl that wants alone time and doesn't fear it is across the street. I see her and I'm waving at her but I'm just too worn out to run full fledged toward her just yet.I'm caught in the in between of longing & empty ... and yet SO blessed.

3 comments:

I miss your words. So, so much. I was thinking about how I used to visit your blog day in and day out, and how much I would learn and laugh and love what you had to say. I hope you can decompress soon, and come back to bless us all with YOUR words. Missing you!