July 17, 2011

Thirty minutes left of me being a fresh 44 year old today. Yes, it's my birthday. And I had an amazing day with my mom in Mitchell. Lunch was at Ruby Tuesdays and we shopped and shopped and we were very hot. And our chats wondered how Laura Ingalls managed in prairie heat like what we had to endure pushing our Menard's cart to our car. I drank three 20 ounces of water in like 2 seconds. I was so thirsty. But I had a great birthday!

July 12, 2011

Sherwood Schwartz, who created two of the most popular sitcoms of the '60s and '70s, Gilligan's Island and The Brady Bunch, died Tuesday in Los Angeles of natural causes, surrounded by his family, a family member announced. He was 94.

Not only did Schwartz send the passengers and crew of the Minnow on a three-hour tour, one that lasted from 1964 to 1967 (and forever after in reruns), but he also wrote the Gilligan's theme song.

He did the same for the 1969-74 Brady Bunch, about a widow and a widower with a lot of kids – and a sagacious housekeeper.

I am not proud of giving in but I did it. I called my brother last night and invited him to see my apartment and I agreed to do his 9,000 photos or so it seemed. It really just took a little over 90 minutes to do it all but he was pleased and all was well in the end.

Earlier in the day I motored to Yankton to get my teeth cleaned at the dentist. However, the last time I was there was April 30, 2009 when my insurance ended after I lost my job on April 1, 2009. I was really afraid that I had three teeth in question of possible new cavities but in the end, I got a clean check up. Nothing wrong. No weak spots just irritation from my sunflower seed abuse! Happy days :) I go back on January 16, 2012 for my next teeth cleaning with Jen.

Today is pretty boring. It's another day off for me which I thoroughly dig but I'm forced to go to a mandatory meeting from 4pm to 6pm and I volunteered to bring the food. Or my gracious momma is bringing it: hot pulled pork sandwiches and another coworker is bringing other snackies to go with it. I'm celebrating my six month anniversary and also my upcoming birthday on July 17th. And today is proving to be very lazy too. I woke up much much earlier and sat around playing Lexulous on facebook and watching mindless TV... I then took a mini nap after that and just showered.

Big Brother 13 is on tonight, so is Flipping Out... then I must do a few paintings that I promised some peeps.

July 11, 2011

Earlier in the year when it was time for me to fill out vacation requests at work, I was anticipating how much fun July 4th would be. My siblings would be coming, I'd get to see my niece and possibly three nephews, we'd play Ladder Golf again and I'd take a lot of cool photos to post on facebook.

I also really wanted to go to Czech Days in Tabor in June... I cannot understand my own brain at times. I mean, I go to this event every June now for the past 13 summers. Each and every time I am there, I am hot, I'm bored, I am greatly annoyed with all of my relatives and my mom and I just walk around aimlessly looking at things or just sitting on one of the many make shift benches, people watching.

Today is July 11th. All those events that I was so looking forward to are now over. In the past and the end results to both? Disappointment. I suppose I could say they both failed my expectations. Once my mom said to me many many years ago was that I get so overly excited THINKING about what the possibilities are and once it happens, it always fails to come true.

She was and is so correct in that. With me.

Great expectations. Something I wasn't expecting to happen was, when I returned to work at Noon on July 8th, I wasn't expecting anyone to come up to me and tell me they were happy I was back or that they missed me. No one has ever expressed that sentiment to me at ANY job I've EVER been at. But it happened. People from all of the departments we have at the hospital, came directly to me, my face, and said to me, "Welcome Back," "It's good to see you're back," "We missed you!" ...and it wasn't because they needed me to do my job, they actually missed me. My persona. Me. They really missed me. I was so deeply touched by this nugget. And it was good to know I was needed and not just needed to fill in the blanks.

So last night, I went to my mom's house for dinner. Spaghetti. A personal favorite of mine that she cooks. Even though, mostly she cooks Czech recipes but spaghetti was served and I was delighted. However, my oldest brother is still hanging out there till Wednesday. When he arrived on July 2nd he initially asked me to help him upload a butt load of photos to his facebook account. I agreed and said "let's do it now." And I meant now. July 2nd, now. Otherwise on July 3rd, chaos would ensue, and it did when my sissy and other brother arrived. And it didn't let up till they left on the 8th. But still, I was home with all of them when I could have done the photos for my oldest bro. Did it happen? No.

I stayed to watch my ultimate addiction: Big Brother 13. My plan was to leave at 8PM to head back to my apartment 10 miles away. Eight minutes left of BB13, my bro yelped up to me stating he was ready to do the photos. Nope. Not going to happen dude. I'm heading back north.

Then he laid on the family guilt. It's infamous in our entire family tree. Everyone with my last name is guilty of it. Including myself. We learned it from the master. My controlling, verbally/emotionally abusive dead father (May you continue to rot in Hell).

I left for home, disgruntled. I even snapped at my adoring mother. I was furious. The guilt was already getting under my skin and it continued to grow. I called my mom and told her I could do it Monday evening (as in today) after I returned home from my dentist appointment or Tuesday after my mandatory work meeting at 6PM. She said she'd tell him. But I got no Email this AM telling me it's a go. I love my brother. A lot. But I am NOT going to bow down to him now, on MY TIME!

Those mother fuckers really messed with my emotions, my mental being all last week. Being ignored from my sissy and my 2nd oldest brother wasn't a good time. Never again will I allow myself to expect greatness from them. And no longer will I put them in the "spotlight" and think they can do no wrong. They can and have disappointed me for so many years, I lost count. But there again, I always expect great expectations.

Blogging has become my therapy. I refuse to seek counseling for something that will only continue to upset me and my happy existence. Their loss right???

July 10, 2011

Soon I'll be 44. In seven days from today. This may sound kooky but I'm looking forward to being 44. While being 43 hasn't been all that bad, it didn't have a lot of good parts either. Okay, with the exception of being hired into my current gig... that happened while I was (and still am) 43. But I also had to put up with a lot of bull shit politics at my old part time gig too. And several things with that, I'm now realizing haven't quite healed properly.

I have done what my wonderful mother is famous for ... "Putting things on the back burner," and eventually forgetting about them or just keep denying them. There is a new moving coming out called "Horrible Bosses." I plan on seeing it and will be blogging about it afterwards, I've already decided this.I could get a prize for being a victim of having several horrible bosses too. And without exception, my last two bosses, and the two bosses before them and the one before all four... all equal to "horrible bosses." Thankfully, God HAS been watching out for me in the past six and a half months, my current boss has been a blessing. Although, I'm still waiting till she starts spewing green stuff from her mouth and I see her eyes roll back inside her head but for now... I'm good. As good as it gets, I imagine. Again, I do not know as all I've had was "HB's."

Back to my birthday. I know this sounds pathetic but all I wanna do is spend time with my "back burner" mom... and enjoy the day doing something. She helped me get a new *used* car two weeks ago and so my birthday gift is within the 2004 Ford Focus. And I'm okay with it.

July 9, 2011

This was originally an Email I sent to my #1 fan of my blog... So I know I am cheating here but....

I know I haven't written a thing since mid May... got too much in my melon and I don't know how to release it I guess.... I do need to keep posting on here for therapeutic reasons.

Last week (July 2- half of the 8th) I took off from my job of six months to spend in my childhood home hamlet with my siblings and their families. I was treated like I had a hideous disease and both my 2nd oldest brother and sissy refused to SPEAK TO ME with respect. Ignoring someone is a form of abuse you know! And my brother's wife wasn't any better... my oldest brother did include me and I had some fun with my nephews/niece.... but being ignored and then have the two treat my mom like dirt royally pissed me off.

I worked Friday-today...very swamped... and came to the conclusion .... to HIDE all posts from my bitch ass sister and sis in law.... I was going to delete them but I haven't yet.

Tomorrow and Tuesday are my days off but am going to the dentist tomorrow and Tues I have a nursing mtg I need to attend (mandatory) ... plus I get paid for going...

Perhaps I should have been picked for The Rapture.... I'm so butt tired it isn't even funny. I have a lot more to gripe/write about but folks, I'll be back. I need something or some place to get my groove on.

About Me

Missing Matilda

I am a very curious but often very misunderstood person. I ask a lot of questions, creativity is a plus in my world and my imagination is as big as any ocean. It's been two years since I moved to the birth place of my Grandmother. I miss her dearly and have always felt she is constantly watching over me as my Guardian Angel. Welcome to Missing Matilda.

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DISCLAIMER: Reader be warned. My blog is simply a way for me to release things that get built up in my melon on a daily basis.The views and opinions expressed here represent my own and not those of the people, institutions or organizations that I may or may not be employed by or affiliated with unless stated explicitly. As I am an adult my blog reflects my experiences of day to day life as an adult. There may be swear words, or topics that will offend some readers. Yes I may say things on here that are not politically correct as I grew up in the 1970s & 1980s, in a society where things were never politically correct. Should I offend you, do not come back to read me or follow me. I also will never apologize about anything that I write. Again this is MY blog and these are MY rules. Welcome to my world as I know it. Peace out.

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