Rook he has a business, strictly second hand,In old San Francisco, by Chelsee’s newsstand.Goods of all description, sit there in Rook’s store,Everything from earrings, to rare books of lore.In his ways old Rook is firmly set,A grizzled graying old World War III vet.

That’s were he stays, just selling used stuff all day,He never deals in anything that's new.Even when he’s dining there at Louie’s for lunch,He’s eating food that Louie first had dished up for brunch!He’s not a schnook, he’s only Second-hand Rook.On Chandler Avenue! On Chandler Avenue! New?

Murphy, you’ve been really stumped in solving your new case. You've been running here and there, all over the place. Fiendish puzzles, driving you quite mad, So now you think you’re really stuck, But wait, its not that bad-

‘Cause, you have a fax. Yes, you have a fresh fax!Read it now it’s full of clues, better than listening to the news,And when you are through, then you’ll know what to do!You’ve got nothing to lose!

Murphy, you just won't believe the data you can find, You can get a slew of hints and facts of every kind. Go get out there, fight for all you’re worth, Then, we know that you will stop the crooks and save the earth!

‘Cause, you have a fax. Yes, you have a fresh fax!Fax machine’s a wondrous tool; faxing stuff is really cool. Soon as they press the “Send”, then you’re nearing the end. Go on, tap those gumshoes.

[Instrumental during which Tex does a happy dance]

You only need the same, as any super sleuth,That one thing that cleverly will point you to truth. While you’re waiting, to get on with the plan,You can take a break and read that junk mail they should ban.

Well! It’s great you have a fax. Yes, you have a fresh fax. It’s no joke. You're in the know. You can get on with the show. Go on your way. You’ve got to save the day! C’mon Tex Murphy, C’mon Tex Murphy,Oh go on you great Tex Murphy!

When a fellow only wants some small employment,Looking all through old Rook’s back yard and trash can,He really does not get any enjoyment,When he stumbles on some evil master plan.

From unpaid jobs against great odds one should run,But investigative duties must be done,So upon consideration I’ll tell you son,A detective’s life is not a happy one.

When investigative duties must be done, must be done,A detective’s life is not a happy one.

When investigating, sometimes you get beaten,You get kidnapped, or you’re buried deep in slime,Or you’re mickey-finned by some thing you have eaten,That’s what happens when you get too close to crime.

Every detective whose worked long has his concerns,That the moment that he turns ‘round he’ll get stunned.Chasing after a suspect, he’ll take a wrong turn,And be facing down the barrel of a gun.

When you’re facing down the barrel of a gun, of a gun, A detective’s life is not a happy one.

When you mess up and your efforts just make things worse, When you fail to see the good in Eddie Ching,When instead of doing right you do the inverse,When you nearly once with Regan had a fling.

When the rule book makes you break the bonds fraternal,And those you should embrace, instead you shun, Like when you betrayed your old friend the Colonel,Then you’ve got to face up to wrong things you’ve done.

When you’ve got to face up to wrong things you’ve done, that you’ve done,A detective’s life is not a happy one.

Oh the world is now a fearful place,The hopes we had, were dashed by war!The past, lost in the bombing,We’ll mourn forever more!

Now we are living in a time of dystopia,A time of dystopia.Dystopia!Dystopia!

Half the world, now lies in rubble,In our future, just more trouble.Norms and mutants fear each other.Radiation life does smother.All will end in revolution,If we can find no solution.Dystopia!Dystopia!

Is it over for the human race?Will the insects, rule all the earth?Can ways, be found to right things?Can we then find rebirth?

Now we are living in a time of dystopia,A time of dystopia.Dystopia!Dystopia!

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