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Was I out of line?

Ok as many of u know i live with MIL, well recently my hubby got a better paying job, which means that if nothing goes horribly and costly wrong we will be able to move out in 3 wks... Yay!!!
Anyway my MIL asked me when he is suppose to get his first paycheck (I know but i did not really want her to know) and how much do i think it will be, let me start off by saying that yes we do help her out so i already expected that but she is also getting us to use all of our money on stuff for the house, before she even dips into her account so we have bought groceries, which is ridiculous cause majority of the things on the list we are not allowed to eat since they are for his lil bro. anyway I did tell her "idk but when he DOES get his paycheck then it will all go to the house the what ever bills we have to pay so that we can move out soon... We are not going to give anyone money
'Cont

no, you arent or werent out of line!! you werent bitchy, she just wanted to take something little and blow it up, and she did. when living with someone, there's a limit and fine line of what you need and need to buy for everyone to be sane. i live with my MIL also and we buy alot of stuff, but we mainly buy the grocery's WE need and yeah we buy some things pple need to share such as paper plates but asking when your hubby's paycheck comes in and depending on just him, there was a line that was crossed somewhere.

'cont
We are not going to spend any money unless it is to buy stuff we need for Jason, (Our DS) (Everyone always calls us askin for money ESPECIALLY her even when we never lived with her as soon as the 15th rolled around) she got mad of course as expected but i was not trying to be a bitch i was trying to make it clear that we ARE serious about moving out and we do not want to lose the house we picked out to rent because we have already put a hold on it for 2 months cause all our money went to her house; she told my DH that night that i was overreacting and she was merely curious, i then stated that if in fact that were the case then i apologise but if she was curious then why did she get his lil brother to ask him as well??? it just doesn't make anysense to me either way she thinks i was WAY out of line for talking to her like that my dh told her that i like to make myself clear and make sure that there is no confusion

No you weren't out of line. We were in the same situation as you, we had to stay with my FIL for awhile to save money to get into our house. It was HIS idea, he told us to stay with him to save up so we did. Then he expected us to pay his utility bills, buy groceries for the household (his 2 younger sons lived there too) and buy him his beer! SO had to have a talk with him and told him we didn't mind buying groceries but we weren't going to supply the household and paying the utilities wasn't part of the agreement. He finally backed off and accepted the agreed upon amount of money we paid him.

Answer by
Anonymous
at 5:28 PM on Oct. 20, 2009

Hard to tell for certain whether you were out of line or not. I suppose it depends on how you said what you did, not just what you said. Doesn't sound like you said anything unreasonable, but, it sounds like SHE is overreacting.

Not worth a family feud though. Tell her that you didn't mean to upset her and leave it at that. Next time she asks something like that, tell her that you would prefer that she ask her son directly whatever she wants to know, and not put you in the middle...nicely, of course.

i do not feel bad for what i said, lol i did tell her that if she thought i was out of line then i am sorry, but not for what i said never that, just sorry for the way that i said it... since to her it did come out wrong, and anon 28 i know what u mean lol she is always asking me to buy her freaking ciggarettes everytime i make a trip to the store, lol i would not mind but me nor my DH smoke so i am not going to pay for something that we are not ever going to see expcept in the trash, lol she always asks her son i tell him to tell her as well as i have told her feel free to come talk to me i am not as bad u think i am, i do not wanna my josh (My DH ) in the middle he does not need that stress but the she gets her youngest to be the middle man lol my DH says she is scared of me, his bro. says that it is cause i do not have the mind of a 20 yr old but rather of someone her age, idk why that would keep her from talking to me tho