Six Easy Tips for Self-Editing Your Fiction

There are a lot of hurdles to writing great fiction, which is why it’s always important to keep reading and writing. We only get better by DOING. Today we’re going to talk about some self-editing tips to help you clean up your book before you hire an editor.

When I worked as an editor, I found it frustrating when I couldn’t even GET to the story because I was too distracted by these all too common oopses.

There are many editors who charge by the hour. If they’re spending their time fixing blunders you could’ve easily repaired yourself? You’re burning cash and time. Yet, correct these problems, and editors can more easily get to the MEAT of your novel. This means you will spend less money and get far higher value.

#1 The Brutal Truth about Adverbs, Metaphors and Similes

I have never met an adverb, simile, or metaphor I didn’t LOVE. I totally dig description, but it can present problems.

First of all, adverbs are not ALL evil. Redundant adverbs are evil. If someone shouts loudly? How else are they going to shout? Whispering quietly? Really? O_o Ah, but if they whisper seductively? The adverb seductively gives us a quality to the whisper that isn’t already implied by the verb.

Check your work for adverbs and kill the redundant ones. Kill them. Dead.

Metaphors and similes are awesome, but need to be used sparingly. Yes, in school, our teachers or professors didn’t ding us for using 42 metaphors in 5 pages, but their job was to teach us how to properly use a metaphor or simile, NOT prepare us for commercial publication as professional novelists.

When we use too much of this verbal glitter, we can create what’s called “purple prose.” This glitter, while sparkly, can pull the reader out of the story or even confuse the reader. A while back, I edited a winner’s 20 page entry. The story began on a whitewater river and the rafters were careening toward a “rock coffee table.”

Huh?

Oh,the boulder is squarish shaped!

Thing is, the metaphor made me stop to figure out what image the author was trying to create. If the rafters had merely been careening toward a giant flat rock? Not as pretty but I could have remained in the story without trying to figure out how the hell furniture ended up in the river.

I’ve read some great books, but as an editor, I might have cut some of the metaphors. Why? Because the author might have a metaphor SO GOOD I wanted to highlight it and commit it to memory…but it was bogged down by the other four metaphors and three similes on the same page. The other metaphors/similes added nothing…unless one counts distraction.

Go through your pages and highlight metaphors and similes. Pick THE BEST and CUT THE REST. Look for confusing metaphors, like rock furniture in the middle of a river.

#2 Stage Direction

She reached out her arm to open the door.

Okay, unless she has mind powers and telekinesis, do we need the direction?

He turned to go down the next street.

He picked up the oars and pulled a few more strokes, eager to get to his favorite fishing spot.

We “get” he’d have to pick up the oars to row his boat, or that is a seriously cool trick.

Be active. Characters can “brush hair out of their face” “open doors” and even slap people without you telling us they reached out an arm or hand to do this. We are smart. Really.

#3 Painful and Alien Movement of Body Parts…

Her eyes flew to the other end of the restaurant.

His head followed her across the room.

All I have to say is… “Ouch.”

Make sure your character keeps all body parts attached. Her gaze can follow a person and so can her stare, but if her eyes follow? The carpet gets them fuzzy with dust bunnies and then they don’t slide back in her sockets as easily.

#4 Too much Physiology…

Her heart pounded. Her heart hammered. Her pulse beat in her head. Her breath came in choking sobs.

After a page of this? I need a nap. After two pages? I need a drink. We can only take so much heart pounding, thrumming, hammering before we just get worn out. That and I read a lot of entries where the character has her heart hammering so much, I am waiting for her to slip into cardiac arrest at any moment. Ease up on the physiology. Less is often more.

Get a copy of Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi’s Emotion Thesaurus to help you vary physiology. Also, if someone’s heart is pounding, that’s okay. We assume until they are out of danger it’s still pounding. No need to remind us.

Really.

#5 Backing Into the Sentence/Passive Voice

In an effort to break up and vary sentence structure, many writers will craft sentences like this:

With the months of stress pressing down on her head, Jessie started ironing the restaurant tablecloths with a fury.

Problem? Passive action. When we use the word “down” then “on” is redundant. Either she is ironing or not ironing. “Started” is overused and makes sloppy writing. That actually goes back to the whole “stage direction” thing.

Active:

Jessie ironed the restaurant tablecloths with a fury, months of stress pressing on her shoulders.

The door was kicked in by the police.

Police kicked in the door.

If you go through your pages and see WAS clusters? That’s a HUGE hint that passive voice has infected your story.

#6 Almost ALWAYS Use “Said” as a Tag

“You are such a jerk,” she laughed.

A character can’t “laugh” something. They can’t “snip” “spit” “snarl” “grouse” words. They can SAY and ever so often they can ASK. Said becomes white noise. Readers don’t “see” it. It keeps them in the story and cooking along. If we want to add things like laughing, griping, complaining, then fine. It just shouldn’t be the tag.

“You are such a jerk.” She laughed as she flicked brownie batter onto Fabio’s white shirt.

There you go, SIX easy tips for self-editing. We all make these mistakes and that’s why God invented revision (that and to punish the unfaithful). If you can get rid of these common offenders on your own, then good editors can focus on the deeper aspects of your fiction.

Have you had to ruthlessly slay your favorite metaphors? Are you a recovering adverb-addict? What are some other self-editing guidelines you use to keep your prose clean and effective?

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Great post. I laughed throughout, especially the physiology portion. I beta’d books with all sorts of stuff going on with the human anatomy. And they were YA. Made me want to pass out by the time I turned to page 2!

What an excellent post. Some people (1) in my writers’ groups insist that we remove ALL adverbs. You have shown when they are helpful and when they are not. (2) My favorite example of a dangling modifier is “Running down the hall, his eyes searched for the intruder.” Painful, to say the least.

Reblogged this on Library of Erana and commented:
Useful advice. Self editing can be a challenge, it is easy to see what should be there not what IS there and many writers (including myself) don’t understand all the rules, or if we do we choose to break them.

Maybe it’s because I’m British, but I have a much bigger problem with gazes following people around than I do with eyes following people around. There’s something emotionally passive about gazing. ‘She gazed at the gloriously coloured fields, her eyes following the butterflies fluttering about the cornflowers.’

Thank you for sharing your opinion on the matter of self-editing. I know I have to work on #6; sometimes I do make the mistake you discussed.

I have certain questions though:
Regarding the passive voice, is it wrong to use it to a certain extent? The sentence comes out to be precise in case of passive voice. That is something I believe. Please enlighten me on that.

And in case of number #2, it is sometimes author’s desire to prolong a moment. That is when he goes for some thing like ‘he looked up to gaze at the sky, at the strike of lightning which illuminated the dark visage of clouds’. What do you think? Something like this is not meant to educate the reader, but just to enrich a movement or an event with something extra.

Another good ‘un, Kristen! Here are two things that my students will tell you make me start throwing up in my mouth…

1. A character who has “a single tear coursing down her cheek.” I throw things when I see this. Does this mean the event that elicited this response was only half-sad? Does it mean the other tear duct is clogged up?

2. I wonder where she is, she thought to herself. Unless this is a sci-fi story where people can read each others’ minds, in a normal world, who else would one think to besides themselves? This is one where I not only throw things but throw up in my mouth… and a single tear courses down my cheek…

Yes. Pruning our own work is hard. That’s where suggestions like these, a list, are helpful. We can practice until it becomes second nature. Also helpful is a critique group. I am able to practice on others’ “stuff” and my own. Even better.
Thanks
Barbara

I love that you posted this the same day I make a post about how things shouldn’t BE easy for writers. These are six tips that are easy to read, easy to understand and use, but may involve some hard work to get right. Which I think is how it should be! The right tips and advice get you to focus your hard work on the right aspects of the job…..

I’m a beginner and found this very helpful! I’m an aspiring children’s book writer and have read several books over this past year that included some of these tips. Already have the Emotion Thesaurus too. Looks like I’m on the right track! Thanks!

But didn’t Elaine on “Seinfeld” say, “People love interesting writing”? :-))) Thanks for showing the difference between interesting and distracting. This is another of your informative and entertaining posts that I must share with friends and other writers on my Facebook author page. https://www.facebook.com/birdfacewendy

Great post – I lap up your writer’s tips, I am editing my psychological thriller at the moment and fear I may be guilty of some of your physiology issues. When I imagine physical reactions to stress, anxiety, fear and shock, I am much too quick to place them in my heroine’s chest. She must be a serious heart attack risk. I’m going to check out that Emotional Thesaurus you mentioned!
There’s also a fantastic book about trauma that I found hugely helpful for thriller writing – I recommend it in my May 6th post http://creakydoorwriter.blogspot.co.uk/ Any of your followers wanting to get the emotional reactions right might find it useful. Thanks again.

Ok so where have I been? I am so glad I’ve found you and although I wished it had been sooner, the right time is always NOW!! Think of all the catch up reading I get to do and how many hilarious stories hubs JUST HAS to hear through my giggles! I won’t be going far so watch out for me!!

You had my heart at the beginning, but number three won my soul. I just finished the book of a self published author where she drove me CRAZY with direction. At least twice a paragraph. She walked me through everything, and it was miserable. I set the book down in disgust at least 18 times, and my husband was relieved when I finished because I kept complaining.

Reblogged this on Phil Partington, author page and commented:
Kristen’s always good for great writing advice. While I’ve seen some of her ‘rules’ broken be several top-selling, prolific authors (and on many occasions), it doesn’t mean it isn’t good food for thought…and as always, well articulated.

Excited about WANACon. And your common sense editing tips are a welcome reminder, as always well stated and clear. Thank you.
The only one that drives me crazy is the supposedly ‘invisible’ said. I hear it often. Yet it is so far from invisible to me. It rips me out of a story to see line after line of he said/she said. Particularly when action used correctly does the same job without the annoying repetition.

The headless follower…whew, that’s a picture lodged in my noggin’ and I have you to thank for it! Great post, Kristen. And a shout out for the Emotion Thesaurus. I could start to reach out my hand, pick it up and show you that it’s right beside my computer but then I was just realizing how passive that would have been, so I shouted really loud at my monitor instead. Nothing happened. 😉

What a fantastic post! I like your succinct distinction between useful and redundant adverbs especially, rather than the more frequent blanket statement that “all adverbs are bad.” I worry in my writing that I don’t use phrases like “Her eyes flew…” – I use the word “gaze” way too frequently – but I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who takes statements like that literally!

Brilliant tips, Kristen. Mathair and I have often wondered why writers, (us included) are so OVERLY descriptive (LOL). Our first instinct was that it’s the inherent need of the author to make sure that the reader sees exactly what is in our heads, but that security blanket… *scapegoat* has been tossed to the side and now we’ve embraced the fact that less is more. 🙂

Very useful! I’m going to share this on twitter and with my writing group! One of my pet peeves is “started” and “began.” Unless it’s the start of something that is important or needs emphasized, then it’s not needed! Also, I love the image of eyes fuzzy with dust bunnies!

I think I’m doing okay on the adverb usage. My two issues are stage direction and maybe some wayward body parts.

Occasional use of the passive voice doesn’t bother me. When it’s used once a paragraph it drives me nuts. I recently read a book where every other sentence was passive voice (I might be exaggerating). I think this was done to change things up since it was written in first person. It really just became distracting.

The right words at the “write” time. It’s frightening how easily we slip into those bad habits of writing. After your post got me all fired up, I went out and slayed 83 exclamation points in my current manuscript!!!!!!!!!! (dang, they’re like rabbits)

So are editors really distracted by these writing issues? I agree with them entirely (and especially enjoyed the coffee table comparison in the middle of the river–I can so easily see doing that!), but these are more fine-tuning strategies. Wouldn’t a book doctor be able to look at the story and character development in a mss and be able to offer very important advice BEFORE a writer takes the time to make the prose sing?

Yes, that is sort of what I offer in my upgraded antagonist class. I have a session one-on-one with the writer to make sure there is a core story problem and the structure is sound. That’s the toughest part. Hiring a book doctor after we’ve written something with no good skeleton is throwing good money after bad. Content and line-editors can be a great investment if the story, itself, is sound.

Great post! I recently read a guide to tightening up writing. It specifically addressed adverbs and cliches and the majority of the book was nothing but examples of text using all adverbs, then the same text written as cliches, followed by “improved” text of the same work, written exclusively in simile and metaphor. I found the book less than helpful. Not every character action and emotion needs a dazzling display of worthsmithery. The very idea that you would use that much imagery is as tedious as watching a lazy sloth pick it’s toenails on a hot summer day.

Your tips on the use of “said” and “asked” caught my eye. I am guilty of that transgression! I am currently in the clean up phase of my second book, The Corporeal Pull. The more genuine editing information I can use, the closer I can get to producing a book that is “worthy” or a reader’s time and energy. Thanks!

I am currently revising a novel, and I’m following Sol Stein’s Triage Method (1) Fix character issues (2) Remove any scenes that weaken the manuscript (3) Ensure all actions are properly motivated (4) Ensure the first page draws the reader in (5) General Revision.

I will make sure to reference this post again when I get to general revisions!

This is a very handy list, and entertainingly written too. I especially loved the “Painful and Alien Movement of Body Parts” section. I edit fiction now, but I used to edit a lot of business documents and reports, some of which had to give a narrative account of people’s activities, and my favorite painful movement (which came up repeatedly) was “he walked into the door.” Ouch.

I will definitely be picking up a copy of the emotion thesaurus too–that sounds both useful and fun.

Just wanna say a little bit of what you fancy does you good. Too much is a poison.

My greated crime is the word ‘was’. I trekked through a chapter and removed most of the cases except the ones relating to genuine occurences in the past, and then I realised what the deals with that word is…

And as well as that, ‘was’ subtly increases the distance from the past (when your story happened) to the present (your story being read). It subtracts from suspence, giving your readers the feeling they’re more likely to survive. And it detracts from the action because it’s further away. “Petrov presented” feels like it could have happened five minutes ago, maybe. The ‘was’ version could be days, weeks, months old.

I came upon this blog and find that it makes a lot of good points. Now, you have created a lot of work for me taking another look at the books I have waiting editing. Not that I’m complaining but this article makes me take another look at what I have written. I am guilty of misusing all six points.

There’s a lot of grunt work to writing after the master piece is done. It’s funny how this is never discussed. People see the finished article and don’t really conceptualize the ground work that has gone in to it. It’s great to see that you are pointing out the “oopse” – this gives aspiring writers a more balanced picture. Thanks for the tips.

Reblogged this on The Fencing Author and commented:
I thought this was an worth while read about self-editing. It brings up some key problems in some literature while addressing them in a funny tone. The only thing I kind of disagree with is her last point about using verbs other than said/asked because I feel like sometimes it works. Opinion?

Reblogged this on Charles Gray's blog of writing and commented:
An Excellent little piece from Kristen Lamb about how to edit your own work. Remember, the more you do the less your editor has to worry about obvious writing problems– which means you have a happy editor. Keeping your editor happy is very, very important.

This is great. I took notes and will be using this as I go through my manuscript prior to submitting it to my publisher. I think I’ve eliminated most of these, but have cut every adverb as a challenge. I will be looking for select areas where they will add emphasis. Sometimes I end up caught up in my story/plot and miss the simple errors that are bad habits from my older newbie writing days.

I’ve probably mentioned this before, (ad nauseum) that someone once told a group of would-be writers “First Spill your guts THEN clean it up.”

I’ve heard it said, though, that getting a friend to critique your work is the quickest way to end a friendship. So, if you’re a newbie to the game, and not flushed with extra spending money, a good way to self edit IS to leave the project once it’s finished. Tuck it into a draw, (the bottom) for a few months, as you work on something else, Maybe even mark it on your calendar, (MAYBE) and then , a few months…. three maybe, perhaps longer, depending on how long it took you to finish the first draft. Anywho, give yourself that distance that enables you to look at your story as the READER, and NOT the WRITER. Once you can see a story with a readers eyes, you have the objectivity you need to fix what’s broken.

Reblogged this on The World of The Teigr Princess and commented:
Reblogging this one to keep track of it for my next editing adventure… yes, even I, the stupendous author of The Tower and The Eye, need to have these reminders printed out and stuck on the wall in front of me… *grins*

Excellent list! I suspect many of us know these, but having a list makes it more clear. And of course it’s far easier to see these issues in the works of others, than in our own work — but again, having this list helps locate the problems.

Thanks so much for this! I’m just getting stuck into my first short stories in a very long while and will apply all these before sending my material for editing. And yes, I would love to hear the unvarnished truth! *crosses fingers, arms, legs …eyes*

This is great! I’m coming up on finishing my rough draft of my first book ever…..and I am definitely guilty of most of these things.
Revision scares me.
My heart starts hammering, and pounding, and I can feel my pulse in my head when I think about it.
XD

Nearly fell off my computer chair with laughter at the way eyeballs don’t slide back in once covered in dust bunnies. Awesome analogy, and an important lesson in keeping one’s physiology to themselves. The only thing I can think to add when self-editing is the show not tell thingamajig. When a characters thought process are churned out in vast monologues of boredom and unneeded drivel, I cringe and skip ahead.
Great post!

I only just learned that adverbs are taboo! After all of this time, it seems the funny little man hawking adverbs to Molly in “Schoolhouse Rock” was a PUSHER!!! Who knew?
Thank you so much for your clarification, I guess it comes down to a risk vs benefit analysis. Is the concept communicated by the adverb valuable enough to take the risk of detracting from the power and clarity of the verb itself.
I was recently chastised for employing the word “reflexively” by a courageous friend. I kicked, (aggressively) I screamed (ferociously) , I argued (vehemently) that I needed to show that the action was routine, well practiced and without thought. It was sooooo important!! Finally we compromised, instead of reflexively catching, my character’s HANDS caught the object. I was pleased, it was body memory rather than a conscious act.
OOPS, “out of the frying pan and into the fire!” …I guess its “back to the drawing board.” Or maybe since my POV character describing the event is only ten, we can assume it seemed as though the hands really did catch the object………hmmm
Regretfully yours,
Aspirating author

PS: Despite all of the trouble you have caused, I am now editing my WIP with new eyes (couldn’t resist). It is so beneficial to understand why a paragraph feels awkward, rather than simply suffering the vague nausea with no cure in sight!
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom!!!

This is such a huge help! I just bookmarked it. I wrote my first novel during NaNoWriMo and actually finished on time but I’ve been struggling through the editing process. I’m relatively new to fiction writing(short stories off and on for the last few years) and this is shows me a lot about good writing/editing. Thank you for taking the time to write this.

hi i am working on my first book and going to use your tips,
in section 1 #The Brutal Truth about Adverbs, Metaphors and Similes, I assume you shouldn’t say that the people smile all the time (“about time,”Lowenna said with a smile. // Grilk smiled back “i’m here aren’t I”) Just a few times a chapter?

Thanks so much for these tips! The most difficult adjustment is using “said” as a tag. In high school my English teachers slapped a dunce cap on my head for using this word. Now I’m trying to break the habit of using flowery poetic verbs for every stupid piece of dialogue.

Great guidance here that I can actually put into action. You’ve answered a lot of the questions I had about writing etiquette in general. I have been caught in a conflict between defining my own personal writing style and proper editing. Thank you x

A very helpful article, thanks! I’ve been trialing editors for my current romance WIP, including industry stalwarts from The Big Four, to freelancers and hobbyists, *budget* options and the gurus who cost a pretty penny. From 9 to 5 I’m an editor myself, so it’s been great experiencing the process from a writer’s perspective. I’ve documented some tips below on what to look for in an editor (and what should send you running) , which you might find interesting.http://catehogan.com/25-things-look-for-romance-editor/

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