A Private Detective Now!

Despite my resistance, Madame Claire Widdecombe has insisted and, as you say, ‘gone over my head’. She was rather impressed with my skills ‘solving’ her case, and she now fancies me a private inspector. And before I had the chance to stop her she touted me to her friends. Perhaps it was the insistence of my benefactor Claire Widdecombe; perhaps the incessant inquiries of her bridge partners (Dieu me sauve des Anglais), or perhaps it was the request of Monsieur Adell and others with cases. But I have relented; I am now offering my services as a private detective!

And it would be poor manners of me not to extend my services to all who inquire, so consider this my first advertisement of the Jerome-Antoine Detective service (I name it for the Saint Antoine – you would say “Anthony” – for he is the saint of lost things🙂 ). I would post a phone contact, but I do not have cellular phone and I would not be so ungentlemanly as to post the phone number of the Widdecombe residence, so if you would, simply comment with any particular inquiries you may find! I will review them and see what I can do.

12 Responses to “A Private Detective Now!”

Ah, I’m glad to see you have taken me up on my suggestion. I actually would like you to investigate in ‘another’ cat, so to speak. if you’re interested just reply, I’ll try and explain it in more detail.

A cat you say? Well, perhaps if you live near the area of London I can investigate any disturbances with your cat for you but otherwise I’m afraid there is little I can do. Do you live in London perchance, Monsieur Adell?

That is the link to my ‘cat’, he’s been cryptically giving myself and my friends riddles and seems to have an unusual understanding of something I’m investigating. I’m not very good with speaking with him however, and have never been able to get much out of him. I’m not sure if you’d be able to help me, but maybe you can examine his account or even try emailing him to figure out more about? What i’m investigating may be end up doing some serious damage and I need to figure out what he knows.

I’m afraid there is precious little I can tell you; a man pretending to be a cat – unless of course it is jazz slang, in which case he truly is a cat – sending out little nonsensical riddles to whoever cares to read? Where is the intrigue, the plot, the gravity? It is as the cat says – madness! I do not see what else he speaks of.

But perhaps I do not understand what you are investigating; you put it in such broad terms, as if you are keeping something from me. Ayez confiance en moi, s’il vous plait! What does this ‘Cheshire Cat’ mean to you exactly?

Alright, I’ll tell you but you probably won’t believe it. This Chesire Cat may not be posing as the character, but BE the genuine article. As in, the actual fictional chersire cat. My friends and are are investigating damage to the very fabric of reality and fiction, and the wall between them (which we have referred to as the 4th wall)

The guy who supplied that video is also believed to be recieving threatening letters from these very ficitonal characters! I know, it all sounds very unreal and fantastic, but it is not something we can just ignore, which is why i asked for your help. Chesire is somehow in the middle of this which is why I wanted you to investigate him.

I realize it may be hard to prove my case with that video, but pay attention to the eye of the puppet on the left, and by all means see his other videos to get a clear understanding of what may be happening!

I don’t have a mystery that needs solving. But this guy does. http://www.youtube.com/user/WTFAverageJoe
He has unique videos and strange written letters with no postal markings. How did they get to his house? Anyways, just take a half-hour and an open mind, watch his videos and see if it piques your interest. Make it a game, see if you can spot all the odd occurrences on your own. Then explain each one away with logic and/or science. If you can’t, I suggest you continue following his video posts until you can.

There’s a guy I’ve been working with that I don’t trust. He’s cryptic, doesn’t give me the help I need to get the job done for him, and doesn’t seem to want to show his face to anyone. Additionally, I have information from an ex-employee of his suggesting that he’s responsible for more problems than I think. My only connection with him is his Twitter account: @YouHaveFailedUs.

In my experience, people create an air of mystery to cover up not knowing what others think they may. I do not know how useful that is to you, but then again if it is so that you do not like the ways of your employer, you should either bring it up with him yourself or find yourself a new job.

I’m working with him too, actually, and this isn’t really that kind of job. it’s the kind of job where bad things might happen if you step out.
(No, I’m not talking about hit men or anything similar.)
Here are some possibly helpful links.
pic.twitter.com/6zSdt5o5