Robert Minch: The distinction between editor and publisher

“Publishing is, or should be, a quiet operation, and should be almost inaudible. The editorial side should be separate from the management side with no disingenuous management requests for editorial mention of an important advertiser’s product, no publisher’s protest against an article that might offend a prominent client, no pressures, overt or hidden; in fact, a publisher should never see a editorial content in a paper or magazine until it had been printed or bound. This would indicate a phenomenal self-restraint, never to be relayed to editors, that his or her publisher has a ‘hands off’ policy, which seems to be a reasonable request.”

Conversely it would be nice if an editor could be able to pressure his or her publisher to allow a columnist’s photo to include his bow wow, thus introducing a bit of humanity to otherwise humorless right-of-center columns.

But wait.

The disclosure panel of the Red Bluff Daily News currently states it is “Published by California Newspaper Partnership.” There is no solo partnership as I have described above. As Pogo would have put it, “Horrors Greely.”

No longer do we genuflect to an actual publisher as we once did to the stern but benevolent former publisher Greg Stevens.

Good grief.

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Time magazine reported this, so it must be true. “November is a time for civic minded men to participate in “Movember,” during which they grow mustaches to raise awareness and money for men’s health causes, but while this fundraiser is a recent invention, it’s not the first time facial hair has a seen a rise in popularity.”

Yes, we see a lot of hirsute men with facial adornment ranging from a short stubble to beards so full that one wonders if the wearers are masking their identity.

However, trends continue when it comes to popular acceptance by men and women.

Years ago Tom Cruise started wearing his baseball cap backwards and it became the hip thing to do. Then a film director decided his leading man needed a masculine make-over, and the age of the unkempt and stubble hero became de rigeur. What next?

Well, why not, in this newly discovered age of women outing male predators and becoming CEO’s of major corporations, why not have women taking charge of their own lives by ceasing to shave under their arms? Foreign films have flaunted this look for years. Why not completely become today’s liberated woman by displaying hair with which you were born, with certain discretion, of course. Might as well forego the shaving of legs as well.

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Oh. Not that liberated yet?

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A local columnist has provided a solution to curb mass shootings in churches, “Churches need to take proactive steps to assure their congregations and attendees that some among them legally carry guns.”

Has it come to this? This admonition is right out of the National Rifle Association playbook. Should this instruction extend to schools, theaters, community centers as it does in City Councils and Boards of Supervisors? Should the Historic State Theatre post a sign reading “To ensure your safety within, please pack the firearm of your choice.”

Yikes.

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SF Chron columnist Nick Hoppe bemoans the time it takes to commute from his home in Mill Valley to his office in San Francisco. He finally found a way to reduce his commute to only 2 hours by heading out at 5 a.m., but only on a Sunday. All other attempts running as much as 3 hours.

How fortunate many of us are to live on the outskirts of Red Bluff and reach our place of work within 10 minutes when traffic lights are favorable, or 15 minutes, tops, when they are not. However, I find that due to my status in our fair city, and my advanced age, the traffic lights are invariably green in my favor.

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Men’s rules to live by:

Every time you talk to your wife, remember that “This conversation will be recorded for training and quality purposes.”

Also, be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision because the road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.

And, for computer buffs, arguing with your wife is like reading the software license agreement. In the end you have to ignore everything and just click, “I agree.”

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Sources say Kevin Spacey will not be awarded the 2017 International Emmy Founders Award. The citation on same states, “It is given to the individual who crossed cultural boundaries to touch humanity,” which sounds exactly what Spacey was alleged to have done. However, he remains one of my favorite actors even though he may not make another film. Tsk, tsk.

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The biography of Lincoln by Carl Sandburg reveals that the author Harriet Beecher Stowe passed judgement on Lincoln by vowing that his greatest virtue was ruling passively rather than aggressively. Something to still remember today.

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The Presbyterian Church called a meeting to decide what to do about their abundance of squirrels in and about the church.

After prayer and consideration, they concluded the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn’t interfere with God’s divine will.

At the Lutheran Church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery and they decided to put a water slide on the baptistery and the squirrels would drown themselves. However,the squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.

The Methodist Church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Lutheran Church.

The Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy by baptizing the squirrels as members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish Synagogue, for after they took the first squirrel and circumcised him, they haven’t seen a squirrel since.

Robert Minch is a lifelong resident of Red Bluff, former columnist for the Corning Daily Observer and Meat Industry magazine and author of the “The Knocking Pen.” He can be reached at rminchandmurray@hotmail.com.