The Forgiveness Solution offers a process whereby we are released from these feelings and not just the thoughts that go with them by:

- giving up the beliefs that generate these emotions
- shifting our perceptions and learning to see things differently
- genuinely choosing and deciding to forgive
- developing positive, compassionate feelings toward the person or circumstance that we previously perceived as hurtful
- finding within us the capacity to feel an authentic sense of peace and contentment when thinking about the person or situation we previously perceived as hurting or harming us
- giving up the desire for retribution, punishment or harm
- interpreting and then realizing these experiences as opportunities for profound personal and spiritual growth

Dr. Friedman writes in the Introduction, “Don’t be daunted by the long list! My point is that the process of forgiveness is a profound one. It isn’t something one dimensional, with a simple beginning and end. It is a thorough examination and repositioning of oneself that leads to lasting feelings of peace, love and joy and a sense of inner balance and calm.

The chapters in this book will address each of these aspects of forgiveness through a series of powerful exercises and processes that include journaling, affirmations, imagery processes, relaxation/meditation, and some work with energy and spiritual healing. Sometimes these processes and techniques will trigger quantum and sudden positive shifts in you, sometimes the changes will be more gradual. There is no right or wrong way for any of this to happen. However it happens for you is the right way.”

The four forgiveness imagery exercises below are very powerful. You may discover, like many of my clients, that you are able to make significant shifts in your ability to forgive from these exercises alone. You most likely will find them very relaxing, peaceful, healing and uplifting. They will also help you connect with a deeper, more profound part of your self, a part often referred to as the inner light or inner Self. These imagery exercises can be done alone or with another person reading them to you such as a friend, peer, spouse, coach, therapist or colleague. If you do them alone, either read them through a few times first or read them into a tape recorder or onto a CD. Many people will benefit from having soft, gentle music playing in the background. This will help you shift your consciousness so you are in a more relaxed and receptive mood. In addition, some people may benefit by first doing one or more of the energy forgiveness approaches in the previous chapters or by doing the Psychological Uplifter. In any case, like the previous exercises, the more you practice them the more benefit you will receive from doing them. If you consistently do the forgiveness imagery exercises along with the energy exercises (i.e., the positive pressure point techniques) , the affirmations, the Psychological Uplifter and journaling you will get the maximum benefit from this book.

Remember that forgiveness is a process that unfolds over time. Practice it on everything and everyone. Life will no doubt present you with many opportunities to practice forgiveness, so be patient and yet persistent with yourself. Ultimately, the goal of forgiveness is to release the barriers between you and your true or divine Self and to dissolve the roadblocks or veil that separates you from others. It will also bring you greater peace, love, joy, happiness, gratitude, wisdom, harmony in your relationships and blessings in your life.

Exercise 1: Creating Well-Being Forgiveness Imagery Process

A. Forgiving Another

Part I. Close your eyes. Breathe deeply. Relax. Allow your attention to focus on your breath. Continue to breathe slowly and deeply. Breathing in and out slowly and deeply, slowly and deeply. Concentrate on your breath as it rises and falls, slowly and deeply. Breathing in and out. Focusing on the breath. Now, repeat the words ‘calm’ on the in-breath and ‘relax’ on the out-breath. ‘Calm on the in-breath, ‘relax’ on the out-breath, silently to yourself. Breathing in ‘calm’, breathing out ‘relax’, slowly and deeply, ‘calm’ and ‘relax’, slowly and deeply, ‘calm’ and ‘relax’. Focusing on the breath slowly and deeply, ‘calm and relax.’ Now ask the creative/infinite intelligence, the divine, holy spirit to help you with the forgiveness process.

Part II. Now think of someone you dislike, actively despise or hate, someone you are angry at or just someone you are very ill at ease or uncomfortable with. Say to that person, ‘I forgive you. I forgive you for anything you may have done consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally, that I believe has caused me pain or hurt. I forgive you for any thought, feeling, act or deed that you have done. I forgive you’. Allow your heart to open to this person you have judged, you have condemned. Open your mind to doubt.

Opening….softening…softening…opening…releasing…. Letting go. Now continue to breathe in and out slowly and deeply. Calm and relax, relax and calm. Opening, opening, more. Softening, softening more, releasing, releasing more, letting go, letting go more. ‘I forgive you (mention that person’s name). I forgive you for the hurt I perceive or I think you may have caused me. I am open to doubt. Perhaps it was just a mistake, an error. I forgive you. I release you. I release me from the pain, the hurt, the fear, the sadness, the incredible anger. I let it go, now….opening, softening, softening, opening, releasing, letting go. Breathing slowly and deeply, deeply and slowly. I allow myself to see your innocence. I allow myself to feel your pain, your hurt. I allow myself to touch your heart and be touched by your heart.’ It is so hard to keep oneself out of another’s heart. Feel your heart opening and touching this person’s heart.
Opening, softening, touching, releasing, letting go. I forgive you for anything you did that caused me hurt or pain. I see your innocence. I see your light. I see my innocence. I see your worth. I see my worth. I release you of all judgments I have made against you. I let go of all expectations I had for you. I release all judgments or expectation I have made against myself. I release the hurt, the pain, the anger, the fear, the darkness. I forgive you. I release you. I forgive me. I am at peace. I am at peace. Opening, softening, releasing, letting go. Breathing slowly and deeply. Calm and relaxed. Calm and relaxed. At peace. At peace.

B. Asking for Forgiveness from Another

Part I. Repeat Part I of this exercise. And once again ask the creative/infinite intelligence, the divine/holy spirit or energy to help you. Select a person from whom you want to ask forgiveness)

Part II. Say, “I ask your forgiveness for anything I may have done consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally that I believe has caused you hurt, pain or suffering. I ask your forgiveness. I ask your forgiveness [fill in the person’s name] for any thought, feeling, word, gesture or behavior that I did or contemplated doing that I perceive injured you in any way. I ask your forgiveness for any condemnation, judgment, complaints, gossip, expectations or deed I may have done that I think has caused you any distress or guilt or pain. I ask your forgiveness. Opening, letting go, letting go, releasing. I ask your forgiveness! I ask your forgiveness. I ask your forgiveness.”

Breathing slowly and deeply, deeply and slowly. Calm and relax. Relax and calm. Now say, “I release any judgment or condemnation, any anger or attack thoughts I may have thought or said or written toward you. I release them. I let them go and I ask your forgiveness.” Softening, opening, releasing, letting go. “I allow my mind to open, to trust. I allow my heart to open to your heart, I allow myself to be touched by your heart. I allow myself to feel your compassion, your love.” Opening, softening, releasing, letting go. “I ask your forgiveness. Touching your heart, feeling your compassion, experiencing your love.” Opening, softening. Breathing, slowly and deeply, calm and relax. Calm and relax. Peace and love. Peace and love.

C. Self-Forgiveness

1. Repeat Part I of this exercise. Once again ask the creative/infinite intelligence, the divine/holy spirit or energy to help you forgive yourself.

2. Now, repeat to yourself: “I forgive me for anything I think I did consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally that caused me or anyone else hurt or pain.” Say to yourself, “I forgive me (use your own name). I forgive myself for any feeling, attitude or judgment I may have contemplated, held or experienced that I perceive caused me or anyone else anger, guilt, sadness or pain. I forgive me.” Opening, softening, softening, opening. I forgive me (use your name) for any condemnation, criticism, or attack thoughts that I used against myself or another to diminish, demoralize or depress myself or another. I forgive me. I forgive me. I forgive me. Releasing, letting go, letting go, releasing. I forgive me for any self-hatred, anger or guilt that I used to devalue myself or undermine my self-worth or my self-respect. I forgive me. I forgive me for any thought, act, behavior or deed that I believe hurt or injured or caused distress to anyone else or to myself. I forgive me.”