Tag Archives: Concerned Significant Other

If you are someone who would like to help a loved one change their relationship with substances or to make any behavioral change, there are four essential tools you can learn. First, Helping through Understanding or thinking about issues of addiction differently using the science we now have available. Second, Helping by Taking Care of Yourself as you need to be able to survive and thrive while trying to help. Third, Helping through Words or learning positive communication strategies that shift the conversation from negative to positive. And Fourth, Helping with Actions which are usually using positive reinforcement strategies.

While searching for different programs for my son, who didn’t connect with the 12-steps programs, I stumbled upon SMART Recovery. There were no meetings offered in my area so I signed up for the training with the plan to start one. I was excited about it because I knew that my son wasn’t the only one without a program he could relate to. SMART Recovery would give them a choice. Continue reading →

This time each year can be stressful for anyone, but the holidays present a special challenge for people recovering from a substance use disorder. Those in long-term recovery typically are adept at navigating the minefield of temptation at holiday social gatherings. But many of those in their first year of recovery, their friends, and family members wonder how best to celebrate the holidays safely, comfortably, and joyously.

Can people get addicted to alcohol? Yes. But as a spouse, you can help your husband cut back on his drinking. In fact, the suggestions outlined below could be used to help anyone stop or cut back on…

ANY addictive behavior!

But to keep it simple, we will talk about how to help your husband stop drinking.

When will my husband stop drinking?

Generally, drinking stops when your husband realizes that the costs of drinking exceed the benefits. You could wait until the costs are very large, so that he can realize the problem more easily. However, by that point his thinking may not be very clear, and he (and you) will have paid a substantial price, possibly to include problems (such as health problems) that will endure. So it is better to stop drinking sooner rather than later.

How can I help my husband get sober?

In this approach you are looking to build the “landing place” before you ask him to “jump.” Many heavy drinkers are reluctant to quit drinking because Continue reading →

SMART Recovery announces a new Webinar on how the Family & Friends of those with addiction can help those they love, while remaining sane and safe.

The foremost experts in this field today, Robert J. Meyers, Ph.D., creator of CRAFT and Jeffrey Foote, Ph.D., Director, Center for Motivation & Change will join Tom Horvath, Ph.D., President of SMART Recovery to discuss “The CRAFT approach: How science, combined with compassion, can make a difference”.

As family members or friends, our intimate connection should make us natural allies. However, we often don’t know how to talk with each other or work together when it comes to the emotionally intense issue of addiction.

SMART believes that Family & Friends deserve high-quality, compassionate and optimistic support of their own. We know it is possible to get sober. We believe families are not powerless, that they can help, without becoming codependent, resorting to tough love or enabling. The tools of SMART and CRAFT work beautifully to encourage healthy, productive efforts towards an improved quality of life for all. SMART has been working to create a rich Family & Friends program that includes a vibrant online community, its own Handbook, and both online and face-to-face meetings. We invite you to learn more at http://www.smartrecovery.org/family

Get Your Loved One Sober: Alternatives to Nagging, Pleading, and Threatening
Reviewed by Henry Steinberger, Ph.D.

To help people seeking sobriety for their loved ones, Get Your Loved One Sober offers a revolutionary program: The Community Reinforcement And Family Training (CRAFT) intervention. The subtitle, “Alternatives to Nagging, Pleading, and Threatening” more aptly describes what this book is about. Getting a loved one into treatment is not the first goal. Arranging for one’s own safety and finding a happier life independent of the drinker’s situation, takes priority. Getting a loved one to moderate, choose sobriety, or go into treatment, are offered as roads to a better relationship.

Still, CRAFT can boast phenomenal success getting people into treatment. An alternative to Al-Anon’s 12-Step tradition and “detachment” recommendations and the Johnson Institute’s confrontational interventions, the CRAFT program is based on non-confrontational behavioral principles like reinforcement. It gives the reader tools and instructions for changing their interactions with their loved ones, which in turn changes the loved one’s behavior. In repeated clinical trials, CRAFT proved twice as likely as the Johnson Intervention and six times as likely as Al-Anon to get loved ones into treatment.