a Star Trek parody blog written by Phil Harwell. Sticking a fork in it since October 2011.

SPACE: THE TRITE FRONTIER. THESE ARE THE EPISODES OF THE STARSHIP SECONDPRIZE. ITS SIXTY MINUTE MISSION: TO EXPLORE LARGE, EXPENSIVE SETS, TO SEEK OUT NEW COSTUME CHANGES AND OLD GUEST STARS, TO GET THE HIGHEST RATINGS POSSIBLE, AND TO REPEATEDLY GO WHERE PLENTY OF PEOPLE HAVE ALREADY BEEN. IN HD (WHERE AVAILABLE).

Category: Season 1

Captain’s Blog, Stardate, um, Tuesday, I think, about 4:30 pm. The U.S.S. Secondprize is en route to starbase Deep Dish $9 for repairs. The wifi is down, half our cable channels are showing nothing but static, and all of the toilets are currently backed up, though nobody seems to know why. The situation, needless to say, is tense.

Clerk arrived at Deck -4, home of Quirk's Pizza Panorama, hungry and at wit's end. He sat down at a table and waited for the server to come by with a menu. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a familiar face...

"Well, hello there, Jimi," said the elderly gentleman, walking over to Clerk's table.

It was dark. The Creature had no problem with that. It moved along quietly across the carpeted floor, zeroing in on its target. It crawled across the bedroom floor. Soon it was on top of the bed. Its claws began to dig in...