The life and times of my natural, crazy, coily hair as we both buck the creamy crack for good!

Archive for August, 2011

Do I really have to tell you guys which brand of product I ended up having to fix on my own after buying 8 ounces of it and seeing it separate into a blob of butters with oils on top?

After that purchase, AfroVeda could officially suck it. I. Was. PISSED! My full-sized Totally Twisted Ginger Almond Butter separated before I could even use it for the first time! I kept having to stir it and put it on my hair quickly, before it separated again, but it looked so gross! I finally got sick of that little game and decided to put my knowledge of basic chemistry (and google) to use.

When a product separates, i.e. splits into oils and butters rather the luscious cream that you thought you bought, what’s happening is the emulsion is falling apart.

Oils and butters sometimes will not stay mixed, just as oil and water won’t, because the molecules of one substance act as little bar magnets (in that they have poles) whereas the other molecules do not. That attraction, or at least some strong hydrogen bonding, is needed for an emulsion to occur, in which one material is suspended in the other.

If you find that you have two substances that will not stay emulsified, you must use an emulsifier to stabilize the emulsion. Emulsifiers come in many shapes and forms: I, personally, ended up heading to Whole Foods and buying some liquid lecithin for about $5.99. It’s a natural emulsifier and some even take it as a supplement (for what reason, I do not even claim to know). I poured about a teaspoon into the 8 ounces of slop, mixed with an electric mixer, and put the butter back into it’s original container. Two days later, there is, admittedly, a little oil on top of the cream, but not even an eighth of what was there before! That’s a huge improvement!

As for AfroVeda…

I’ve never had the distinct pleasure of dealing with their customer service (this was an on-the-ground purchase), but the quality of the full-sized Totally Twisted Ginger Almond Butter just baffled me. What made things worse was the fact that the solution was so simple, and quick to boot. I’ve heard that the owner of AfroVeda has no help with her business, but selling a product in that condition is just unacceptable. Add to that mixture the huge price-hike in her products and my anger sits on top. This just won’t work.

Hey World. Sorry for the period where the exclamation mark usually is, but this post is kinda heavy…

…like, Gucci heavy (and that’s real heavy)…

So here’s where the story starts:

I wake up on this wonderful Wednesday morning ready to stretch my mind as well as my body and grabbed my computer straight away, ready to read my favorite online magazines for the first time this week, when instantly my cheesy grin becomes a frown.

Because there’s yet another article about white rappers who exploit black culture, and although this particular publication is geared towards black women, I already know exactly which direction the comments went in:

“Well look at Beyonce’ and Keri Hilson trying to be white! They just get whiter and whiter everyday!”

To which I respond, “Bish, that’s not what the article was about! And furthermore, what exactly is ‘white’ and what is ‘black’”?

This same issue has pissed me off since I was in grade school in Charleston, SC and the kids there teased me because I didn’t talk with the customary “Charleston accent”. “You tryin’ to be white,” they’d say. No, my parents just aren’t from here and they don’t like the way it sounds, so they don’t let me talk like that. My bad.

But then when the other black kids find out that you’re smart, or see you wearing your hair down and it just so happens to grow past your shoulders, or that you turn your music down when you are in neighborhoods or near the school, or that you don’t get into wearing brand name clothing, you hear the same old rhetoric:

“You wanna be white or something?”

So forgive me if it sickens me when I see grown folks doing it over a star’s chosen style of dress, or how they choose to wear their hair, or the color of said hair, or how toned they want their body to be. Why is it that we’ll criticize a sister for doing her own thing instead of fitting in to the same old bullshit stereotypes that our parents were fighting against? Telling someone how they should wear their hair, how they should look, how they should act, or sound, or think – I’m sorry, but I call bullshit on the whole premise of it all. Since when is anyone on this earth so “black” or so “white” that they can tell someone else of that race exactly who they are and who they’re trying to be.

Beyonce’ and Keri’ parents (and even Be and Keri) were still called “niggers”. They still suffered under the burden of discrimination and oppression. They are still icons in a community that looks just like them, and best of all, they make positive music for a community traditionally lacking in that area. So you’ll just have to forgive me if I still consider them to be black, regardless of their hair and make-up choices.

And to all those black kids out there who still switch their CDs out when they get close to their schools so that they won’t be judged, who sit in AP classes all day, and who may not have that customary accent that all those around you have: do you, and fuck your judgmental classmates. The courage you show when you refuse to change just because someone doesn’t like who you are makes you “blacker” than anyone who would try to mold you into some stereotypical “black person”.

Finally, to all those who assume that hair, skin, nails, and accent (among other superficial things) are what determine a person’s race: that’s just a stereotype, the box that those who don’t understand you need you to fit into so that they can feel better about your existence. Don’t just light-heartedly hop into that box! Be you instead, or else you risk being the “white person” in reality.