‘Stache of the Day, 11/23: Yosemite Sam

By sheer virtue of proportions, Yosemite Sam’s mustache drops the facial hair gauntlet to his opponents. Take off his floppy, tortilla-like hat (which, along with the neckerchief, makes him look he’s one Mint Julep short of Opening Day at Del Mar) and I’m pretty sure his mustache is approximately 85% his height. From his shoulders to the floor, and at its base it’s also the width of his arms. I think this qualifies Sam’s mustache as his primary weapon, and his six-shooters just merely an afterthought. In fact, without the guns, Sam may be scarier. With the pistols, I look at him and think “well, maybe this four-fingered man is willing to negotiate” and “why the hell does he keep calling everything ‘varmint’?”

The moral of the story: never doubt the facial hair growing prowess of a man whose eyebrows start at one side of his nose, wrap over the brow, and end at the otherside. Especially if he’s wearing chaps.

About Facial Hair Formal

Any schmuck can grow a beard or sport a goatee…but to wear a mustache takes a certain amount of bravado. Join us on the 29th of November for the 4rd Annual Facial Hair Formal…an event where like-minded gentlemen, and the ladies that love them, get to rub elbows with the social elite. Say no to cancer, and yes to a good time.