Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Take Care while it Matters…

Your grandparents live with you…if not when did you last visit them? Or when was the last time you spoke to them?If you don’t remember the answers to these questions…its time you took care of them.

It was my schooltime when i was in 12 th std.

Those past years have been tough for my family and me. My Grandma is in her later stages of life, waging a war between life and death.She walks with 3 legs ( A stick for the balance), that too only for a few metres.If you have a unfamiliar sound coming on the sleepless nights; If you have a body which covered mere by skin;If there is a pulse reading you feel while holding her hand, which says the heart beat fine which ensures your saturation is fine…you are alive!Never mind if you don’t open your eyes or talk or recognize people around you. Measurable parameters are fine, so you are alive??

She has a speacial love and affection on me and the same from me without any selfishness.

Manytimes she urge me to come closer and hold her hand instead of placing her hand on my shoulder, she believes on my affection more than her hope.

She asks questions which she doesn't know what it is and that too repeatedly for countless times. Those days she told me a lot of stories and urge our serventmaid to continue the stories when she feel very tired and she will make sure that he is going in the right direction of the story...…

all 78 years old. She was married at 13 and had taken care of our grandpa's family single handedly with lot of courage and kindness... she was always keen on developing the wealth in terms of land and succeeded too.The house they lived in, stretched from one street to the next….so big a house that you can never manage to cover the place at a glance with lot of serventmaids, cattles, pet animals.Its amazing to hear that she had time for all.Now she hardly talks…if she does talk, it’s slurred.

Her brain is affected and her memory comes in flashes. She fails to recognize my Dad sometimes but can talk about her relatives at the same time.But at times she would surprise you with amazing clarity on looking at me.Did somebody say old age is nothing but second phase of childhood? I cannot but agree more. While feeding her, we usually stand around her,urging her to open her mouth for a teaspoon of water or a coffee whcih she likes much…coaxing her like you would a 1 year old. We await every single word she utters like never before.I pray god for her long life, for her to be back on her feet and talk incessantly as always.

My school days came to end. Finally i had spent a solid 2 months of time especially for my grandpa.Its time for engineering entrance exams,had been away from her for a month, done my exams and came back with ray of hope that she will be brave and bold as like before.But for my expectations, she was very weak and not able to walk too, always lying on the bed where her entire life shrink in a bed.My 12th results came, secured a gud percentile.We have to go to chennai for engineering counselling.But the grandma's condition is very critical and no more hope of recovery.Nothing can be done as my date of counselling is nearing and we left chennai, praying god with tears in the eyes.We were in University...My engineering admission got over and Dad got a call that Grandma is expired.we rushed back home immeditely for the final things to be done for her...

As for the questions at the start,I make it a point to take care of them at least every fortnight. While we run around with a heat of hope each day, we fail to pause and attend to few things…which might mean lots to others. Not that we don’t want to…just that we don’t realize that such things can make a difference.