Tag Archives: sex

Lately, my thoughts are all over the place. It’s been such a long time since I’ve written anything for myself. Part of this is unintentional; much of it is/was a product of my life circumstances.

I ended up dating someone (like, an actual, real relationship) for about 8 weeks and that really effed things up. I spent zero time writing for myself. I worked on a couple of things early on and then, my life revolved around a relationship I wasn’t sure I wanted.

Like this:

I’m not sure how it happened, but I recently stumbled across the amazingness that is Last Week Tonight.John Oliver, a British comedian, hosts his own show on HBO covering news stories from the past seven days.

In just two days, Oliver has taught me more about how the United States is effed up than I ever learned in all my years of school combined. And to add to it, he’s my kind of funny.

Now, I’m an American. I live “abroad,” if you will. I consider myself to be somewhat “with the times” and I try to keep up with the happenings in the Americas (and the world), including (but not limited to) presidential race candidates (kind of) and school shooting atrocities. While this is true, I was also totally unaware of many other things happening in my home country.

Everybody’s talking about the Duggars, and probably for good reason (much of the time, anyway). Just in case you’ve been living under a rock lately, here’s a link to an article detailing why the Duggars have been – yet again – in the news.

I don’t want to join the thousands of haters. I don’t want to condemn Josh Duggar for his past transgressions, though I have concerns about that, too. I don’t want to blame him for this current situation because, let’s face it, folks: he did not ask for this. Nor did his victims.

You may disagree with nearly every defense the Duggar clan has made about this whole debacle. You may absolutely hate them for a myriad of reasons. You may have supported them in the past and now, you just don’t know what to do. Whatever your current stance, I think we can agree that there were many “mistakes” made in this sad story – not just “mistakes” (a loose term in this situation, in my opinion) made by Josh, but also mistakes made by his parents, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar.

The Duggars are a hyper-conservative family and openly oppose hot topics like abortion, LGBT issues, and a slew of other things. A lot of their commentary is just downright insensitive in my opinion, though there are many who support and agree with them. They are part of something called the Quiverfull Movement, a disturbing religion-based community that places misogynistic power on childbearing, dating relationships, and of course, sex itself. You can read more about it here and about a woman’s revelations after being raised in a Quiverfull family here.

So knowing all this, and now what we know about Josh Duggar’s “mistakes” (as the family has chosen to call them), what can we say about Jim Bob and Michelle? Is it fair to accuse them of also making mistakes?

Abso-effing-lutely.

Like me, you may disagree with how the Duggar parents dealt with such a serious issue in their home. The amount of time that passed, for one, before they sought help is troubling. How they went about seeking help is also concerning. But what’s the biggest deal that no one seems to be talking about in all of this mess?

Chances are, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar never talked in detail with Josh about sex, human bodies, hormones, and all the stuff in between.

As I mentioned earlier, it’s no secret that the Duggar clan is a devout religious and conservative family. While many of their values are admirable, some of them are incredibly outdated. I would even argue that, in this day and age, their methods are archaic and a complete disservice to their children.

I’ve been working on a few things lately and, largely, felt like I needed to share my own story about my “sexual awakening” to set up my thoughts on a post in the works. Rather than bore you with the same story in a different way, I’m re-blogging the original for you to scan.

If anything, I hope this story will spur other young women struggling with some of the grey areas of their sexuality to be brave and confident in themselves.

You are beautiful and desirable, Girl. Go get what you want. Or don’t. The decision is yours.

Don’t you agree, Reader? Life is just too short. Too damn short. Too short for long lines. Too short for stupid arguments with the people you love (though they are bound to happen…). There’s just not enough time.

There aren’t enough hours in the day. I have often thought this to myself, especially over the last several months. I don’t know where my days go I am so busy sometimes. I wish I could stop time, get things done, and then start it back up again and let the hours trickle away with just a smidgen less stress than I had in the “moment” before. But alas, it’s just not possible.

You know what else life is too short for? For closed-mindedness. I’ve hinted and mentioned several times that I would breach a line of conversation that would possibly uncomfortable for some (and honestly, myself included). To say it out…

I read in the news today that the home of my alma mater, Springfield, Missouri, repealed the Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity (SOGI) bill, an act protecting rights of the LGBT community. Along with several others in the community, I am thoroughly disappointed with this decision by the people of Springfield. Though the tally at the end of the day was close – 51.43% for to 48.57% against (less than 1,000 votes separate these percentages, Reader) – it’s sad that a community of people who call themselves “Christians” have just sent one of the strongest messages of “hate” to a community of people they claim to want to “love.”

Let’s get into the gritty part of what this ordinance repeal was all about. (You can probably already guess…) Back in October, the city council added to their current anti-discrimination laws: the original ordinance protected LGBT people when it came to housing, work, or public facilities. Based on the repeal (because you’re smart, so you get this), now gay and transgender people can legally be turned down for housing, restricted from public facilities like bathrooms, or even be fired from their job simply because they don’t fit the “mold” the greater Springfield public wants them to fit.

So, how did this happen in this day and age? you might be wondering. I’m so glad you asked. Springfield is home to the headquarters of the Assemblies of God – a rather conservative, Pentecostal, evangelical Christian denomination. I was raised A/G and now avoid them like the plague for many reasons… We won’t get into that story here because it doesn’t matter. But what does matter is that the city of Springfield is infiltrated with Christian people. Now, I know just as much as anyone that not all Christian people are bad or hateful. Hell, I used to be one and I promise, I had the best intentions (though they were totally wrong). But, unfortunately, many of them are so closed-minded and fighting against issues (like this particular ordinance) that is a complete slap in the face of fellow humans.