Spirit Trouble taught us so much in life, particularly during and after the cancer battle. Our lives were changed forever having to make so many choices about her treatment, about her care. She touched the lives of many and was a great ambassador for cancer, for her breed, for dogs in general.

And in the end, she sent us forth with a last mission - to educate the grieving pet owner to demand quiet dignity as they are prepared for passing.

This last story is not to frighten, not to chastise - it was an unfortunate chain of events that could have been prevented.

We had set up an evaluation with Dr. F to see if their were any other options or treatments that could be taken as she had become completely immobile due to arthritis in her right rear leg, she didn't seem to be in pain but expressed embarrassment to be carried out and held to do her 'business'.

After the non productive evaluation we opted to have her laid to rest that day.

Dr. F had treated Spirit Trouble through her amputation/chemo for 28 months and she was very special to him, he explained the procedure and told us to possibly expect things like involuntary movements, loss of bowel and bladder control, but said she would have already passed and that it was a natural occurrence after death.

Trouble was a chemo recipient, and as such her veins were gone. On blood draws, they frequently took it from the jugular. When they began to try to administer the fatal injection, they were unable to locate a vein. An area on her front leg was shaved, still nothing. We were asked to leave the room while they placed a catheter. It took an agonizingly long time (45 minutes) while they searched each of her remaining legs for a vein. I twice told Shanna we should take her home and she refused because she knew we would just have to go through this all again. I now wish I had followed my instincts.

Once the catheter was placed we were allowed back in the room with her, she was shaking all over and pleading with her beautiful eyes to go home, I have only seen her shaking once in her lifetime and that was after a chemo treatment when she was having chills.

The injection was to be quick acting, a peaceful passing. Not with Trouble. As in everything, she would fight her way through it. There were agonizing seconds of gasping and gagging, she turned eyes to me as if begging please daddy take me home. It took a further injection prior to her succumbing to the fatal drug.

Why do we choose to tell this? Because, even though we would have made the same choice again, we would have insisted she be let go in a different manner. There would have at the very least been a sedative to keep her calm as they located a vein or placed a catheter. In the perfect world, she would have been heavily sedated or anesthetized to avoid her fighting the drug.

If or when you face this final act, be kind to your faithful companion and be kind to yourself. Demand sedation at the very least. Don't leave and carry with you the guilt of having not let them go peacefully.

Sophie didn't fight her injection but she did do agonal breathing. I had seen it many a times (I was working as a vet assistant) but it was really disturbing for my husband. Sedation wouldn't have helped that, but yea. Euthanasia can be scary.

I don't want to knock on the dr's practice but the whole situation is entirely WRONG.

We give a pre-injection which goes into the muscle, the shot does sting, but only for a second and most animals tolerate it well. We usually prep owners that their pet might cry so in some cases we take the patient with us in back, give them the injection, and then bring them right back to the room. The animal then falls asleep in their owners arms.

The sedation sucks on the one hand because it makes their vessels disappear but even if we have to try different veins your pet feels nothing, they are asleep - they have no idea what is going on. Things don't always go smoothly but at least your pet isn't in pain.

I read a forum post on craigslist one time that someone put their 18yr old kidney cat to sleep. The vet placed a catheter and then euthanized the cat. I know what 18yr old CRF veins are like and I think it's completely ridiculous to torture the pet trying to get a vein while they are awake.

I've seen a few euthanasia's without a pre-injection. Some dogs start vocalizing and it is really hard to watch. Euthanasia solution is a lethal dose of anesthetic, so she probably felt a quick rush and went to sleep - even if she was gasping and looking around she was probably really doped up and really didn't know what was going on so I hope you don't feel guilty that she was tortured or that she felt herself dying. Obviously none of us know because it wasn't happening to us but when I had heart surgery and they gave me my pre-stuff orally all I remember is taking the medication and going to sleep, however I didn't actually fall asleep and was talking with my parents and joking around but I have no recollection of that at all.

The whole situation sucks and I am truly sorry that you had to go through that. I would be absolutely mortified if I had to be in the room helping with something like that. I know at my clinic we try to make it go as smoothly and respectfully as possible.

iluvk9 wrote:Bob and Shanna, I will apologize right now for not reading this yet.

But please know, I am praying for our Angel, Trouble.

Joyce, don't feel like you HAVE to read it. There is no reason for you to apologize. You have a fresh grief and there is no reason to impose more trauma on yourself. We know you are with us, and for that we are grateful.

plebayo wrote:Obviously none of us know because it wasn't happening to us but when I had heart surgery and they gave me my pre-stuff orally all I remember is taking the medication and going to sleep, however I didn't actually fall asleep and was talking with my parents and joking around but I have no recollection of that at all.

This is a really good point, she probably remembers none of it. I've had three surgeries and did the same thing on all three, they started the anesthetic and I continued on and had many minutes of conversation before actually going to sleep that I have absolutely no recollection of.

I'm also fairly surprised they did not give an initial sedation, I'd say it's "almost" common practice at the ER vet I worked at, I've actually had a vet mention that this is specifically why they do give an initial sedative. Although I wouldn't say it was even uncommon, more like rare, there have been situations I've seen where the euth. did not go smoothly and it is so, so unfortunate. I'll just further agree with the statement the euthanol is an anesthetic, so hopefully anything she may have felt was brief.I'm so sorry that this happened to you guys.I hope that they at least mentioned a regret or similar sentiment about how the whole process went for you guys

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day, tomorrow doesn't look good either.
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"You didn't know of the magical powers of the break stick? It's up there with genies and Harry Potter as far as magic levels go." SisMorphine 01/07/07

Every single time I have been involved in a Euth (whether one of my own pets or when I worked at vet hospitals) the animals were ALWAYS sedated intramuscular first. I can't believe that your vet did not do that. The moment of Euthanasia is supposed to be one of peaceful passing, the last gift that you can give to your best friend. I am so sorry it wasn't that way for you guys, and especially for Trouble.

RIP Trouble. <3 <3 <3

"All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another." -Anatole France

I still can't read your original post, but want you to both know, I am so sorry things went wrong. I am sure it adds to your grief over having to let Trouble go. And if nothing else, whatever you told about has just warned numerous people who read PBT. That would be the only good thing I can find in this.