Porn Scientists Discover a Third Dimension

It’s a new site with a good gimmick: a 3D scene with the foxy Hungarian Arpad Miklos manhandling ginger stud Blu Kennedy. 3-D porn is not new. The highest-grossing 3-D movie in history, The Stewardesses (1970), was a softcore porn flick, and we already reported on the ambitious, $4 million 3D porno coming out of Hong Kong. But since DominicFord is the first 3-D venture that involves fiery red pubic hair like Blu’s, we’re impressed.

Exercise moderation with your red and blue glasses, though. Masturbating won’t make you go blind like Mom said it would, but watching too much 3D porn in one sitting will give you eyestrain.

I tried it with the glasses that I found in an old Dumpster, and it’s hot, I won’t lie. But because of the added dimension, you perceive them as tiny, tiny people. I’m not sure that I’m ready for The Amazing Oral Adventures of Thumbelina.

I'm not one for bragging about intellectual accomplishments (it's something I learned from, you know, graduating with honors from Brown University), but Conner Habib is justifiably excited about his blurb in a book written by Carl Sagan's son.