Bruno Mars: Unorthodox Jukebox

I know L-A won’t ever ask me to borrow this (as she has a rather unreasonable hate on for The Bruno), but that’s ok. We rarely go for road trips together (maybe it’s because I listen to shit like Bruno Mars). I actually think she’d like this if she gave it a try. It has a distinctive 80’s vibe to it (80’s in a good way!), and I’ve heard more than once that his Locked out of Heaven jam sounds a lot like The Police from that era. Me? I’m digging this song. A lot.

A time machine to take me back to my 20s to wear the white crocheted number Rihanna is sporting in her “Stay” video

Guys, I swear I searched for a photo but couldn’t find one. Imma gonna have to post another video.

I get that it is not realistic nor practical for me to be wearing a white two piece in winter, in my thirties, while in my second trimester of pregnancy. This isn’t a “real-talk” Christmas list though.

A trip to Cape Town with Solange

I want to party with Solange Knowles in a swimming pool in Cape Town. I want to borrow her clothes and jam with her on a bus. Again, not a realistic wish, but I’m keeping it. Obviously I’m still obsessed with her EP and the video for Losing You.

I can’t imagine anyone else I’d rather see this with than these ladies. I really, really appreciate Beyonce (holy fuck the above GIF is making me sick to my stomach. Do I do this shit to you all the time with these GIFs?)

In 25 seconds, Bey has made me squeal in anticipation. K? L-A? Let’s make this happen.

L-A: Yaaaay! The world didn’t end and we all still get Christmas! Which means we get Listmas! I love Listmas because I love lists and I love stuff. I may make a second list, but for now, I’ll make this a short Friday list (p.s. there are other lists coming from our interns/unpaid staffers/friends Krista, Mel, Anthony and Jill: so get ready for that! They know how to reach for the sky with their wishes)

1. An Ikea Monkey

Not for me. For my husband. I had no idea a human could love a monkey in a Swedish themed big box store that much.

2. A shearling coat

Because a monkey is kind of a lot of work. You know, they demand a lot of attention and might throw poop. Instead, I will wear the shearling coat* and demand things and definitely not throw poop, therefore making me an awesome wife and a good Ikea Monkey substitute.

Clearly not this one. This is more Ally. I expect the Ikea Monkey to inspire designers for Fall 2013.

Fun fact: I had a shearling coat 20+ years before the Ikea Monkey made it a thing. This is possibly the most hipster thing I will ever say.

*on second thought, I do not want a shearling coat. I would never wear it. I don’t care if this makes me a crappy wife. I want this coat.

it’s only $716! on sale!

3. More obscenely priced bras

I don’t have a picture for this. I just know I want more. I got fitted properly and I can’t tell you how delightful it is to know that the girls are right where they should be at all times. And if Santa doesn’t come through, I’m going to kickstarter this into action and buy all the colours. Because this is not your 3 for $20 La Senza action. This isn’t even my $60-80 Change bra. This is the real deal. And this could be a game changer my friends. Game. Changer.

p.s. FYI to Santa, they have the make and model on file at Lily’s. Just give them my name.

They have a buy one/get one 50% off sale on now. Still not cheap, but a tiny bit easier to justify two bras. (Their prices got them seriously bad reviews on Yelp. I want to ask what people expected? I went in knowing it wasn’t going to be cheap).