Wednesday, April 24, 2013

I’m a sucker for post-apocalyptic
stories. Maybe it’s because it gives hope for the future no matter what we may
face. Whatever the reason, the promos for this movie hooked me right away.

Jack (Tom Cruise), otherwise known
as Tech-49, and Victoria (Andrea Riseborough) operate a team on the devastated
remains of Earth. Jack goes out to the dangerous wastelands that now cover the
planet and repairs drones that have been damage by the Scavs.

What
are the Scavs? They are the dastardly aliens that invaded Earth for its
resources and nearly wiped out the human race. A few of them live on the
surface of Earth, amid the ruins that they created.

Jack
and Victoria are almost done with their tour of duty and then they will report
back to the base station and be transported to Titan where the rest of Earth’s
survivors are making a new life for themselves. There’s just one problem. Jack
is the curious sort and when the Scavs try to capture him, he starts to wonder
why.

Cruise
does an excellent job on the film as does the rest of the cast. The writers and
directors have done a wonderful job of keeping the suspense about what has
happened on Earth and what will happen next all throughout the film. It had a
great ending. The visual effects are great. I especially loved scenes with the
two-man flyer that he zips around in during the movie. And it definitely
touched on some emotional chords.

In fact, I consider this an almost
perfect movie. It is an interesting story and nothing gets in the way of
telling it. If you like science fiction then you are in for a good time. This
movie easily earned a full four Movie Bucks and I recommend you go out and see
it as quickly as possible.

Randy’s
Rating System

$$$$=
Full PriceSee this movie right away
and pay full price, it’s worth it.

$$$=
MatineeCatch this as a matinee or
other discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Second Chance Reviews are off to a good start. Thank
you to those who contacted me and told me how much they liked the first one.
For those of you who missed the explanation of this new feature here it is
again:

Sometimes I miss my chance to catch a movie while it is
still in the theaters. Those films that I happen to catch as a rental will be
offered as a Second Chance Review. If you like what you read about a movie you
can rush out, or casually saunter even, to your local video rental outlet and
check it out.

But that’s not all. I am going to ask characters from my
novels to write the reviews. I’ll introduce the characters and ask them a few
questions and then it’s up to them to tell you about the movie. If you happen
to think that any of the characters surpass the others in their reviewing
skills you can inform me and I’ll see to it that they get some extra rotations
in the batting order – so to speak.

This week allow me to introduce you to Wregan. He is the
main villain in my novel Hellathon. As filled with bad guys as this movie is I
thought he was the best choice to review it.

Randy: Thanks for joining
me, Wregan.

Wregan: I’m not a villain.

Randy: I suppose that’s
all a matter of perspective. You did attempt to have your best friend’s wife
killed.

Wregan: She deserved it.

Randy: And then you were
instrumental in getting your best friend executed.

Wregan: We were no longer
friends when that happened. And – he deserved it.

Randy: What about all of
their great-great-grandchildren that you had systematically killed. They didn’t
have any contact with you; did they deserve it?

Wregan: Had I known that
you planned to put me on trial here I would have brought one of Purgatory’s
finest lawyers to answer your questions.

Randy: No need for that.
Please, the floor is yours. Tell us about the movie.

As is typical of this entertainment form the story is
told from the wrong perspective. Bryan Mills (Liam Neeson) is placed in the
seat of honor for this tale when it is obvious that Murad Krasniqi (Rade
Serbedzija) should prevail.

In response to the killing of his brother, Murad captures
Bryan and his ex-wife Lenore (Famke Janssen). By the ill-fortune of luck, their
daughter Kim (Ma ggie Grace) is able to elude her would be captors and then
aids her father in his escape. This allows Bryan to continue his reign of terror on Murad’s life,
attacking business associates and destroying valuable assets.

Like my nemesis, Banan, Bryan has the necessary skills to
excel in violence. He is able to dispatch his opponents with nothing but his
bare hands most of the time and with firearms when he can obtain them. If you
like the slaughtering of men as they seek revenge for the wrongs done to them,
then you will enjoy this story.

I for one did not. The men working for Murad are
incompetent. How hard can it be to shoot one man? Do they not train with their
weapons? Do they live such pampered lives that they cannot absorb a simple
punch, or two? Their failure to stand up to Bryan Mills sickened me. I also
found it hard to believe that a man like Murad could come to power without
being able to fashion any better plan to deal with his foe than he push forth
armed thugs and hope they succeed. Where is the Machiavellian strategy that
must accompany any plan that hopes to succeed against a highly trained warrior?

The actors played their roles well enough when they were
talking, but battles they enacted were droll. Randy forced me to watch the
first story so as to be able to compare the two and I find this second one to
be a poor copy of the original. If you support the might makes right crowd then
you should probably see Bryan
trouncing his foes at one of the discounted events. Or perhaps wait until it
can be viewed in the privacy of your own home – lest anyone find out that you
resorted to such tedious measures to entertain yourself.

My rating for the story is two-and-a-half coins of the
realm.

Randy’s Rating System

$$$$= Full
PriceSee this movie right away and pay
full price, it’s worth it.

$$$= MatineeCatch this as a matinee or other
discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Prequels are an interesting beast.
They tell us how everyone got to our favorite story and the best reveal a great
deal about the characters we love that we didn’t previously know. However, when
you attempt a sequel for an especially beloved story you run the risk of
straying too far from what made it successful. Fortunately, this film did not
fail in capturing the wonder that is the Land of Oz.

Oscar Diggs (James Franko),
otherwise known as Oz, is a magician with a traveling carnival. Which means
he’s really nothing more than a small time con man. When he is caught putting
the moves on the Strong Man’s wife, he borrows a hot-air balloon and escapes an
imminent beat down. It doesn’t take long for him to run into a tornado that
dumps him into the magical land of Oz.

Once there he runs into Theodora
(Mila Kunis) who recruits him to exterminate the evil witch (Michelle Williams)
that has been plaguing the kingdom. With the help of a flying monkey, named
Finley (Zach Braff), he sets off to earn a kingly reward in gold and gems.

However, in Oz things are not always
what the seem.

Due to time constraints I ended up
seeing this in 3-D, which I almost never do, and have to say that I’m glad I
did. There were some 3D effects that really added to the magical nature of the
film that would have been lost in a regular 2D showing. I highly recommend that
you see this film in its 3D version.

What I loved best about the movie
was the bright, beautiful scenery and the equally colorful and imaginative
creatures that populate the story. Disney was really able to present a wonder
land that we haven’t seen before. The story itself was excellent and did a nice
job introducing us to familiar characters and bringing us to the point where we
are ready for Dorthy and her band of misfits to show up. I don’t know if this
will become a classic, but it certainly blends well with the original movie.

About the only complaint I have is
that I think they could have cast Oscar better. James Franko has moments where
he is wonderful as the charming fraud, but most of the time I found his
charisma level to be fairly low during the movie. Mila Kunis had her up and
down moments as well. But I expect that there will be people that will disagree
with me on this point.

All in all, this film earned a full
four Movie Bucks and I recommend seeing it first run, and on the best screen
available to you.

Randy’s
Rating System

$$$$=
Full PriceSee this movie right away
and pay full price, it’s worth it.

$$$=
MatineeCatch this as a matinee or
other discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.

Monday, April 15, 2013

I am introducing a new feature on my blog.
Actually, it’s sort of like two features in one. Both are interesting on their
own, but together I hope to throw out something truly . . . reasonably
entertaining.

The
first is an expansion of my movie reviews. Sometimes I don’t get to see a film
while it’s still in the theaters. For those movies that I happened to see as a
rental I am offering Second Chance Reviews. (Catchy title don’t you think?)
That will give you a second chance to see the film before it disappears into
the dusty archives of your local video rental store.

But
that’s not all. I’m going to ask characters from my novels to write the
reviews. How awesome is that? And just to help you get to know these folks,
I’ll interview each new character before hand. Today, that will be Dave Watson,
from the upcoming novel: Exit Stage Left.

Randy: Hello, Dave. Welcome to my blog.

Dave: Dude! Totally.

Randy: I hope you didn’t have any trouble
getting away from your normal gig.

Dave: Which one? Selling the automotive marvels
that are Hondas, or solving mysteries for our elite clientele in Hollywood?

Randy: So then, you’re pulling double duty:
sales savant / private detective. That makes sense. You live in a town where
everyone has a slash in their title. You know, like - actor / writer / waitress

Dave: Right! I’ve dated a couple of them.

Randy: One more question before I turn you loose
on this review. Your partner in the detective business . . .

Dave: Sherlock? He’s only the most outstanding detective
mind in the world. And we have been best buds since high school. Was that the
question?

Dave: Absolutely! Just as much as I’m the
living, breathing reincarnated Doc. Watson. Except that I don’t know any of
that medical stuff anymore.

Randy: Thanks, Dave. Now go ahead and tell us
about the movie you saw.

Here Comes the Boom$$$

PG

105 Minutes

Starring: Kevin James, Salma Hayek, and Henry Winkler.

Director: Frank
Coraci.

This movie was totally shibby. It’s
all about this school teacher who used to really shred it in the class room.
The kids loved him and they like graduated from high school with honors and
all. Best of all, the teacher, Scott Voss, is played by Kevin James who could
play me in the television version of my life story. Other than my blond hair,
and deep tan, and dazzling white teeth we look exactly alike.

Then he finds out that his friend is
going to lose his job. The school is running short on money so they want to get
rid of the music department. Thank heavens something like that could only
happen in a movie. Can you imagine what the world would be like without music?
It’d be like a Saturday morning without a cool breeze and the warm embrace of a
monster wave.

Marty, the music teacher, is played
by Henry Winkler. Of course, he doesn’t look much like Fonzie in this movie,
but if he did he could totally go up to Principle Betcher (Greg Germann) and go
“Aaayyyyyyyyy.” And the Principle would snap out of it and do the right thing.
But instead, Scott decides to raise the money as a mixed-martial arts fighter.

Even though the entire movie was
funny, the best part was showing that when we all work together, everyone wins.
The Asian dude gets a new cook, the brother gets a new job, and the immigrants
get a new country. Confused? Well, watch the movie and you won’t be.

Here Comes the Boom gets
three-and-a-half boards. I know that Randy calls them movie bucks, but com’on and
take a look at them. There’s a big ‘S’ that stands for “Surf” and then that
straight line that’s the board. Bucks or boards, it doesn’t matter. See this
movie with your kids. Then give them a big hug.

Randy’s
Rating System

$$$$=
Full PriceSee this movie right away
and pay full price, it’s worth it.

$$$=
MatineeCatch this as a matinee or
other discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Dreamworks takes us back to the
Stone Age with their latest movie and really rocks it.

The Croods are the last of their
kind. All of the other cavemen have been stomped by mammoths, eaten by
sabertooths, and done in by the common cold. In other words, the rest of the
families on the block have met with unfortunate ends.

This has led to Grug (Nicolas Cage)
being just a tad over-protective. If tad meant totally paranoid that is. He has
kept his family safe by teaching them to fear anything new and to spend as much
time as possible hiding.

Most of the family is good with this
game plan, except for Eep (Emma Stone). She has this crazy notion that there
are exciting things to see out beyond the cave. Like – sunlight. As you can
guess, this leads to a disagreement of views between her and her father.

Then everything changes when she
meets Guy (Ryan Reynolds) who predicts The End only to be followed by the
destruction of their home. With no choice except to follow Guy, the family
embarks on a terrifying journey to find a new home.

I thoroughly enjoyed this movie.
There are some wonderful moments between father and daughter and a great
dynamic between the role of a father protecting his family and the inventive
young generation that moves the race further along the road of evolution. The
film has plenty of funny parts and is fast paced enough to have kept my
interest the entire time.

I give it three-and-a-half movie
bucks and recommend a matinee showing, but I don’t think you will be
disappointed if you saw it at regular price. While it falls a little bit short
of being that movie I rave about all year long, I do plan to pick it up on DVD when it comes out.

Randy’s
Rating System

$$$$=
Full PriceSee this movie right away
and pay full price, it’s worth it.

$$$=
MatineeCatch this as a matinee or
other discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

The first G.I. Joe movie proved a
bit of a contradiction for me. Normally, I resist films that present action
scenes that are beyond the scope of human capability, but accepted all the
ridiculous stunts because they felt natural for a story based on a cartoon
about humanity’s top heroes. The point being, I enjoyed the first movie.

Sitting through the first ten
minutes of the sequel I thought I was going to repeat my experience of the
earlier film. But I was wrong.

Zartan (Arnold Vosloo) in disguise
as the President (Jonathan Pryce) frames the Joes and then orders them to be
destroyed by his very own Cobra forces. This includes Duke (Channing Tatum),
who makes a very quick and unfortunate exit from the film. Only Roadblock
(Dwayne Johnson), Flint (D. J. Catrona), and Jaye
(Adrianne Palicki) escape the massacre. When they look into why they were
attacked they determine that the President must be an imposter and go about
finding hard evidence to prove it.

Meanwhile, in what feels like a
totally different story, Snake Eyes (Ray Park) deals with his arch nemesis
Storm Shadow (Byung-hun Lee). An interesting turn of events leads us back to
the incident in which Storm Shadow became a villain. Snake Eyes, with the help
of Jinx (Elodie Yung) must capture Storm Shadow and bring him back to the Blind
Master.

I’m not a fan of this movie, or should
I say movies. The story-line for Snake Eyes was much more interesting than the
main plot, but it felt as if it should have been a separate film. In fact, had
it been a separate film they would have been able to fully develop the story
they were telling.

As to the main plot, I felt cheated.
There is some great chemistry between Dwayne Johnson and Channing Tatum at the
beginning of the movie. Then they pull the plug on Tatum and toss in two new
Joes. Maybe they thought that the two-for-one swap would add up to more, but in
this case losing one good actor to two mediocre actors did not increase the
entertainment value of the movie. Both the lines the actors were given and the
way they delivered those lines left me quite bored. (At least it wasn’t painful
to watch like Die Hard 5.)

And my hero, veteran actor Bruce
Willis, turned in a disappointing performance as well. It felt as if he were
there collecting a paycheck. He is capable of doing so much better.

On the positive side, Firefly (Ray
Stevenson) put in a noteworthy performance as one of the villains. Unfortunately,
I found him more interesting than any of the heroes. Also, most of the scenes
with Snakes Eyes are pretty entertaining. And there are plenty of explosions
and fights for action fans.

This
film earned two movie bucks from me. Most of the acting is flat as is the
majority of the dialogue. There is not enough story to drag it along. Kids will
probably enjoy it. Even though a score of two movie bucks indicates watching it
at a discount theater, I think my recommendation would be to wait for it to
come out on video.

Randy’s
Rating System

$$$$=
Full PriceSee this movie right away
and pay full price, it’s worth it.

$$$=
MatineeCatch this as a matinee or
other discounted showing.

$$=
DiscountWait until this movie reaches
a discount theater near you.