Amish Kitchen: With tongue in cheek, young Lovina says: Homework should be illegal

Dear readers. Today I, Lovina (youngest daughter of Lovina), thought I’d give Mom a little break and write her weekly column. In case any of you are confused, I was named after my Mom so we share the same name.

Although I’m not as busy as my Mom, it takes 90 percent of my energy to put so much brain into schoolwork! I think homework should be illegal, it is physically and mentally too stressful for our bodies.

For instance, when I ask Mom to help me with my homework, it doesn’t really get me anywhere. She’s smart but she wastes ten percent of the little time I have by doing the multiplication problems on paper instead of using the calculator.

I never thought I needed school. I always knew I was born a natural genius. Just don’t go asking any family members; they probably have stories that would tell you differently. Anyway, there’s no trying to get out of school now. Although I did try to get people to fall for my theory about being a natural genius, I gave up since this is my last year.

I’m going to be graduating from eighth grade middle school in May. Time flies, it seems like yesterday I was in kindergarten. Even though sometimes I forget I’m not an adult yet.

Sometime this month we are going to present our school portfolios. I think there is a special name for it, but I forget. After presenting our portfolio to our parents and some other people, we will serve them dinner. The best part is that we eighth graders get to bake the food for them ourselves. If I’m any good at that kind of stuff like my Mom is, then the food should be edible. The school also hires a comedian to come in and be funny, I think. I’m nervous abut presenting the portfolio but other then that it sounds like fun.

Right now Loretta and Verena are making cookies. I should be helping them but I get the fun part of eating them.

The weather here has warmed up a lot today. I can’t complain, I’ve been looking forward to it warming up. Earlier this week I had just started thinking that winter had left us … and then of course it snowed. On the bright side, there is still no doubt of me being a genius. I’m right 99.9 percent of the time. Apparently when it snowed that was the one percent of time I was wrong.

I should go get started on supper, and then go outside and enjoy the sunshine while it lasts. My brothers Joseph and Ben are doing chores. Kevin is reading his new sets of books that Mom got him. He is very proud of his books and gives me strict instructions on how to use them properly if I ask to read one.

Kevin asks me the most random questions that even I don’t know what they mean. Then when I can’t make sense of it, I sit in silence, which rarely happens with me. What else is there to do when my head is spinning in confusion?

Anyway, I’m going to help Mom and my sister make supper. Or the next question Kevin will be asking is, “Is supper ready yet?”

Lovina’s Amish Kitchen is written by Lovina Eicher, Old Order Amish writer, cook, wife and mother of eight. Her newest cookbook, The Essential Amish Cookbook, is available from the publisher, Herald Press, 800-245-7894. Readers can write to Eicher at PO Box 1689, South Holland, IL 60473 (please include a self-addressed stamped envelope for a reply); or email LovinasAmishKitchen@MennoMedia.org and your message will be passed on to her to read. She does not personally respond to emails.