Monday, April 11, 2016

Jesus do I hate this. The stupid contract says I have to actually meet with teachers before I give them their observations and I just had one thrown out because I forgot. That's not gonna happen again. Stupid contract. I don't see why I even have to go in their classrooms at all. I could just write the observations and email them to the stupid teachers. Don't they know how busy I am?

"Thank you for coming here today, Ms. Feinstein. Remember I'm always here to support you in any way I can."

"You'd support me more if you didn't rate everything I do ineffective," she says. The bitch.

"Of course I'm very sad to do that," I say.

"Why did you do it then?"

"For one thing, you didn’t differentiate your worksheets. What about the ELLs?"

"There aren’t any ELLs," she says. Wise ass.

"That’s not the point. How do you know every one of your students is on the same level as that worksheet?"

"I have 34 students in that class." Sheesh. Always with the excuses.

"How many of them are ELLs"

"None."

"Well that's not the point. The point is you didn't do enough formative assessment."

"Isn't it formative assessment when I walk around the room and correct the kids' work?" Again with the excuses. If I get rid of her I can probably hire my high school girlfriend. She'd dress up the place for sure! I make a serious face.

"What I'd like to see is something more interactive, like the green and red cards, for example. I love the green and red cards. You can't go wrong with the green and red cards."

"What are you talking about?" How can she ask me that? Didn't I give an entire meeting on the green and red cards?

"Well you give them green and red cards, and if they understand they put up the green cards. If they don't they put up the red cards. You can't go wrong with the green and red cards," I tell her, with a knowing nod.

"What if they hold up the green cards when they really don't understand?" Smartass.

"Then you use the cards again until they admit they don't understand," I tell her.

"What if they simply say they understand over and over and you don't find out they don't understand until they take a test? Isn't it better if I just look at their work and see what they can and cannot do?"

Man is she a pain in the ass. You know what I could go for? One of those Fiber One cheesecake bars. Man I love me a Fiber One cheesecake bar. But NO. I'm stuck sitting here with old Feinstein.

"JESUS CHRIST WILL YOU JUST USE THE DAMN GREEN AND BLUE CARDS? WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU ANYWAY?"

Oops. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. Everyone in the outer office is looking at me. I look back at them and they all turn away. I look again. None of them are gonna rat me out. They know they'll pay for that.

I wonder how long it will take before I'm finally rid of this old bat.

Jesus do I hate this. The stupid contract says I have to actually meet with teachers before I give them their observations and I just had one thrown out because I forgot. That's not gonna happen again. Stupid contract. I don't see why I even have to go in their classrooms at all. I could just write the observations and email them to the stupid teachers. Don't they know how busy I am?

"Thank you for coming here today, Ms. Feinstein. Remember I'm always here to support you in any way I can."

"You'd support me more if you didn't rate everything I do ineffective," she says. The bitch.

"Of course I'm very sad to do that," I say.

"Why did you do it then?"

"For one thing, you didn’t differentiate your worksheets. What about the ELLs?"

"There aren’t any ELLs," she says. Wise ass.

"That’s not the point. How do you know every one of your students is on the same level as that worksheet?"

"I have 34 students in that class." Sheesh. Always with the excuses.

"How many of them are ELLs"

"None."

"Well that's not the point. The point is you didn't do enough formative assessment."

"Isn't it formative assessment when I walk around the room and correct the kids' work?" Again with the excuses. If I get rid of her I can probably hire my high school girlfriend. She'd dress up the place for sure! I make a serious face.

"What I'd like to see is something more interactive, like the green and red cards, for example. I love the green and red cards. You can't go wrong with the green and red cards."

"What are you talking about?" How can she ask me that? Didn't I give an entire meeting on the green and red cards?

"Well you give them green and red cards, and if they understand they put up the green cards. If they don't they put up the red cards. You can't go wrong with the green and red cards," I tell her, with a knowing nod.

"What if they hold up the green cards when they really don't understand?" Smartass.

"Then you use the cards again until they admit they don't understand," I tell her.

"What if they simply say they understand over and over and you don't find out they don't understand until they take a test? Isn't it better if I just look at their work and see what they can and cannot do?"

Man is she a pain in the ass. You know what I could go for? One of those Fiber One cheesecake bars. Man I love me a Fiber One cheesecake bar. But NO. I'm stuck sitting here with old Feinstein.

"JESUS CHRIST WILL YOU JUST USE THE DAMN GREEN AND BLUE CARDS? WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU ANYWAY?"

Oops. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. Everyone in the outer office is looking at me. I look back at them and they all turn away. I look again. None of them are gonna rat me out. They know they'll pay for that.

I wonder how long it will take before I'm finally rid of this old bat.

Top Secret Correspondence

Quoteworthy

At this point, the only reason left to support this President, is that he reflects your hateful heart; he shares your contempt of people of color, your hostility toward outsiders, your toxic misogyny, your ignorant bigotry, your feeling of supremacy.

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Views expressed herein are solely those of the author or authors, and do not reflect views of my employers, the United Federation of Teachers, or any UFT union caucus.

Stories herein containing unnamed or invented characters are works of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.