On January 11th, the Toronto Raptors will host the Brooklyn Nets in a battle of two teams that are shockingly heading in different directions. The Nets are currently 10 games below .500 and 2.5 games out of a playoff spot, while the Raptors are sitting pretty as the No. 4 seed with a record of… 13-15. Oh Eastern Conference, you are a delight. While things could easily change by the time these two teams play, the Raptors are going to party like it’s the first round of the playoffs and host “Drake Night” while the Nets are in town.

You see, the Raptors play in Canada and Drake is from Canada, so everyone gets a moose and some hockey sticks. As for Drake, he could possibly attend the game, as the Miami Heat play at Brooklyn on Jan. 10, so once he’s done watching his favorite teams, he could swing by the Air Canada Centre for a LaBatt’s and part of Dave Coulier’s act. This concludes another edition of “Everything I Know About Canada, I Learned From Pop Culture.”

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It is all a secret plot to have him star in a remake of “Littlest Hobo”.

Drake will be lured to Toronto to sing, and then the evil town mayor will try to lure him into his van with drugs. Only the dog steals the drugs before Drake gets in the van. As the mayor speeds away, he hits Justin Bieber and then crashes into a tree and dies. Drake then sings the Sarah Maclaughlin sad animal song (fade to black).

Yeah, when the season was starting they made him their Global Ambassador, so he’s actually on the executive staff of the team, with an office and his own staff. So really, this is pretty much expected.