A "Gift Card Bridal Shower"

I recieved an invitation (using this term loosely) to a Gift Card Bridal Shower.Â I was wondering if anyone had ever heard of this before.Â I think it is the ultimate in rudeness, and I had never heard of such a thing until I got the invitation.

Basically, there is no get together.Â The invitation states (in a cutesy way) to mail the bride-to-be a gift card to honor her and her upcoming wedding.Â There is no get-together.Â No cake. I feel I at least deserve a piece of cake in exchange for a gift card, right? ;)

I hate the idea, and I really don't want to partake.Â However, I am fairly certain that the bride-to-be has no idea this is happening, and it is her only shower.Â I would have gladly gone to her shower and given her a gift.Â I am really at an impasse as of what to do.Â We are close friends with the groom, in fact my husband is standing as his best man.

What would you do?Â Send a gift, a gift card, or nothing on principal?

I recieved an invitation (using this term loosely) to a Gift Card Bridal Shower.Â I was wondering if anyone had ever heard of this before.Â I think it is the ultimate in rudeness, and I had never heard of such a thing until I got the invitation.

Basically, there is no get together.Â The invitation states (in a cutesy way) to mail the bride-to-be a gift card to honor her and her upcoming wedding.Â There is no get-together.Â No cake. I feel I at least deserve a piece of cake in exchange for a gift card, right? ;)

I hate the idea, and I really don't want to partake.Â However, I am fairly certain that the bride-to-be has no idea this is happening, and it is her only shower.Â I would have gladly gone to her shower and given her a gift.Â I am really at an impasse as of what to do.Â We are close friends with the groom, in fact my husband is standing as his best man.

What would you do?Â Send a gift, a gift card, or nothing on principal?

You said that you don't think the bride knows this is happening, but surely she must know because if this is her "shower" she would be aware that there is no actual shower. Â I don't know, the whole thing seems very odd to me.

If you are close to the people and want to get them a gift I would say get them what you had in mind to get them and maybe ask them out to dinner or something. Â Then just ignore the "shower."

You said that you don't think the bride knows this is happening, but surely she must know because if this is her "shower" she would be aware that there is no actual shower. Â I don't know, the whole thing seems very odd to me.

If you are close to the people and want to get them a gift I would say get them what you had in mind to get them and maybe ask them out to dinner or something. Â Then just ignore the "shower."

The bride didn't send this, correct? I certainly would not punish the bride because her maid of honor is a twit who doesn't know proper ettiquette. I'd probably still just buy the gift that I was going to buy anyway and while you're out, stop by the bakery and get a cupcake for yourself. Its not the ideal situation, but its her day, and to bring drama into it that she didn't start, would be immature and selfish. I do, however, agree that it is the epitome of tacky.

The bride didn't send this, correct? I certainly would not punish the bride because her maid of honor is a twit who doesn't know proper ettiquette. I'd probably still just buy the gift that I was going to buy anyway and while you're out, stop by the bakery and get a cupcake for yourself. Its not the ideal situation, but its her day, and to bring drama into it that she didn't start, would be immature and selfish. I do, however, agree that it is the epitome of tacky.

That is really a tacky idea. We had an invite to a coed shower a few yrs back that had some "clever" rhyme about giving the couple cash. We declined.

I say have your DH talk to the groom and feel him out. It's hard to imagine the bride would be totally in the dark. She may have the impression that she's saving people time by not having a traditional shower. I would decline the gift card tackiness and just bring a gift on the day of the wedding.

That is really a tacky idea. We had an invite to a coed shower a few yrs back that had some "clever" rhyme about giving the couple cash. We declined.

I say have your DH talk to the groom and feel him out. It's hard to imagine the bride would be totally in the dark. She may have the impression that she's saving people time by not having a traditional shower. I would decline the gift card tackiness and just bring a gift on the day of the wedding.

Some people (me, for example) hate any kind of "shower" that doesn't involve soap and water. It is possible that she made it very clear that there was to be no shower. So twit of honor took it upon herself to come up with a (very tacky) alternative. I'd not automatically blame the bride.

Some people (me, for example) hate any kind of "shower" that doesn't involve soap and water. It is possible that she made it very clear that there was to be no shower. So twit of honor took it upon herself to come up with a (very tacky) alternative. I'd not automatically blame the bride.

You said the girl asked you not to mention it to the bride? I wonder if you'll get another inviation soon for a real shower, then you'll have to get 2 gifts. That's the only thing I can think of.I don't know why she wouldn't want the bride to know there is no shower...

You said the girl asked you not to mention it to the bride? I wonder if you'll get another inviation soon for a real shower, then you'll have to get 2 gifts. That's the only thing I can think of.I don't know why she wouldn't want the bride to know there is no shower...

How can the bride have no idea that this is happening if this is her only shower? Unless the person sending these invites is doing it totally on their own as a "surprise" to the bride, otherwise what an awkward conversation for later...."Hey Maid of Honor, so, uh, when is this shower supposed to be exactly? Just wondering when to plan, what to wear,....""Oh, you're not getting a PARTY, you big silly! I'm just going to come over one night after work and hand you a manila envelope with some Applebees & Home Depot gift cards in it from random friends and family....you know, the kind you can pick up in the checkout line at the grocery store. Congratulations and best wishes for your new life together!"

How can the bride have no idea that this is happening if this is her only shower? Unless the person sending these invites is doing it totally on their own as a "surprise" to the bride, otherwise what an awkward conversation for later...."Hey Maid of Honor, so, uh, when is this shower supposed to be exactly? Just wondering when to plan, what to wear,....""Oh, you're not getting a PARTY, you big silly! I'm just going to come over one night after work and hand you a manila envelope with some Applebees & Home Depot gift cards in it from random friends and family....you know, the kind you can pick up in the checkout line at the grocery store. Congratulations and best wishes for your new life together!"

Good point. Makes me think a little deeper on this. However, I still don't believe the bride knows about it for the reason that I posted above.

However, the invitation is not from the Maid of Honor, though she is very close to the bride and groom. The bride is only having one person stand with her, and I have no idea who she is. The girl who sent the invitations is from my hometown. So, I suppose I could see that the sender was instructed to throw a shower for the people from the groom's "side" or is just doing it on her own accord? Does that make sense?

I hope that is the case, and the bride does get to experience a real bridal shower!

Good point. Makes me think a little deeper on this. However, I still don't believe the bride knows about it for the reason that I posted above.

However, the invitation is not from the Maid of Honor, though she is very close to the bride and groom. The bride is only having one person stand with her, and I have no idea who she is. The girl who sent the invitations is from my hometown. So, I suppose I could see that the sender was instructed to throw a shower for the people from the groom's "side" or is just doing it on her own accord? Does that make sense?

I hope that is the case, and the bride does get to experience a real bridal shower!

Sorry, I just re read this and realized the Maid of Honor is not the one throwing the non-shower, which makes it even more odd and confusing. If I were you, I would call the person that sent you the gift card invitation and flat out ask her if the bride is having a shower.

Sorry, I just re read this and realized the Maid of Honor is not the one throwing the non-shower, which makes it even more odd and confusing. If I were you, I would call the person that sent you the gift card invitation and flat out ask her if the bride is having a shower.

Odd and confusing is right! It took me re-reading the invitation three times before I even understood what it was really asking. And now with you ladies bringing up good points it just keeps getting curiouser and curiouser...

Odd and confusing is right! It took me re-reading the invitation three times before I even understood what it was really asking. And now with you ladies bringing up good points it just keeps getting curiouser and curiouser...

Are you currently living far from your hometown? It almost sounds like a really tacky version of a "virtual shower"....those are gaining popularity now for people that have friends/family scattered to the four corners. It could be a way to get the groom's people to participate in a shower without the obligation of traveling to him/her.

Still pretty tasteless though. Especially if this is the ONLY shower....it cuts out the fun of all the local attendees.

Are you currently living far from your hometown? It almost sounds like a really tacky version of a "virtual shower"....those are gaining popularity now for people that have friends/family scattered to the four corners. It could be a way to get the groom's people to participate in a shower without the obligation of traveling to him/her.

Still pretty tasteless though. Especially if this is the ONLY shower....it cuts out the fun of all the local attendees.

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