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It's week 6. I have a viral infection that refuses to go away; it's cold outside; my garden has turned to mud. What do you think? Nope, I've not been out into the garden at all this week. I'm guessing I should be planting seeds, tomatoes and such, but quite frankly I can't be bothered with all that. The basic problem being with this growing thing being that, well, I've no real interest in plants. Bit of an issue that one.

I did pop into a few garden centres for motivation. Is it me, or are they all the same these days? I went into about 6 different ones, and they all follow the same, essentially none plant based theme. Massive ambience free cafe selling Costa coffee; discount waterproof clothing; some basic gardening tools; books for people that don't like to read; DVD's of tv series from the 1970's; lots and lots of weedkiller - as in several isles worth; a few straggly looking plants at inflated prices.

I'd say that garden centres are essentially for people that don't like gardening, yet who still need a retail hit now and then. They were all slightly depressing places. I'm guessing their demographic to be people in their late 60's, early 70's? Not spritely retirees; the ones who dress solely in biege and who would have bought Rover cars back in the day. They probably drive Peugeots or hybrid Toyotas now. Is this what we have to look forward to in life?

Needless to say, even though I went in with the intention of buying some plants, given I had no need for books on 1001 places to see before you die, 12 DVD's on the Dambusters, or products that kill roots, or dying plants at full price, well, I bought nothing. The one centre where I fancied a coffee, one on the A25 coming out of Dorking on the left, the Knights, well the cafe was right next to the exit door, so a tad cold. Worse they were having drain problems outside, so it stank. And this place, a Knights, was the most expensive for dying plants I found. They also had a small play area outside with a sign asking children to keep off. Joyless place.

So, if you are interested in plants, sorry, so far I have no idea where you get them. Garden centres it seems not. I'm wondering if mail order is the way to go? Do people buy their stuff from those advertising supplements that fall out of the weekend newspapers?

Actually I did do a bit of work in the garden. Started to cut at the bamboo roots with an axe, as this seems to be the only way to get through them. I've also put some wood chip* - not wood bark - around my £2 gooseberries. You remember those? £40 for four from a garden centre, or £8 for four from Poundstretcher? I don't know if the £10 each ones would have done any better, but so far one cheapo has definitely died. Two seem fine and happy, with a third somewhere between dead, dying and OK - really can't tell. With my viral infection, ten minutes on bamboo roots was enough.

*I did try and buy some, yet for the life of me I've no idea where from around Reigate. The stuff I found was left over from the 2012/13 winter storms.

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