For veterans, respect is more than just symbolic

Tim McClain, Special to The Courier-Journal;
1:04 a.m. EDT June 14, 2014

Tim McClain

A few months ago, I was one of thousands attending a public event at a golf course. The Marine Color Guard appeared in their dress blue uniforms, bearing flags and rifles.

Each of these young Marines looked fit and focused. I stood at attention, shoulders back and right hand over my heart. As a boy in the 1950s, that's what I learned to do when the colors are presented by members of the U.S. military. While some joined me, I couldn't help but notice that many attendees stood with their arms folded. Some had caps on their heads, others poked at their phones and a few chatted.

And it made me mad.

I know this may seem like a small incident. These displays of indifference don't necessarily signify a lack of respect for our flag or country. However, I felt bad for the men and women in uniform that day presenting this symbol of the nation they've signed up to defend. What did they think as they looked at the crowd?

For me, that day's events serve as a reminder of a larger conversation that needs to happen in America. With the drawdown of U.S. forces overseas, it's important for civilians and veterans to consider how we communicate and, more to the point, what we owe one another today.

I graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy in 1970 and served 20 years before transitioning to civilian life. To understand what's happening now, I asked a few recently discharged veterans to tell me about their experiences interacting with civilians. Their responses were enlightening. One veteran said many people assume military service means combat and subsequent post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). "I have the utmost respect for anyone who's faced those challenges," this veteran said, "but when I was in the military, I worked in HR."

According to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, about 34 percent of the nation's 21 million living veterans have served in combat. About 7 percent have been diagnosed with PTSD, and yes, we must give them every resource and honor for their ongoing sacrifice.

However, it's important to understand that the majority of veterans served in non-combat roles.

By the same token, veterans are sometimes asked, "Did you win any medals?" First, military medals are earned, not won. Second, the implication here is that, if a veteran served in a support role rather than in combat, their service is less valuable or doesn't count. Taking nothing away from soldiers who bravely serve in combat zones, it's worth noting that none of them would have a reasonable chance at survival, let alone victory, without adequate support, training and management from military personnel of every rank and duty in the armed forces.

Some veterans don't always know how to respond to the statement, "Thank you for your service." I like this saying. I think it represents our society coming a long way from the disrespectful treatment many soldiers of my generation received upon returning from the Vietnam War.

However, as with any community, our members have differing opinions. According to a recent poll conducted by the Washington Post and Kaiser Family Foundation, 52 percent of Iraq and Afghanistan veterans said they like "talking about [their] service with casual acquaintances or strangers" while 41 percent don't. Some veterans told me they don't mind the saying while one said, "It always makes me feel a bit awkward because it serves as a reminder of those who didn't return to hear this show of support."

Some veterans report that their conversations stall after a civilian thanks them for serving. This may happen due to military culture often emphasizing the group, cause and mission over the individual. If you find yourself in that situation, it's worth asking the veteran where he or she served, what kind of work they did in the military or what they are looking to do now. I believe a deliberate show of appreciation is warranted, but it's more important to treat veterans as they want to be treated — as we all do — like fellow citizens worthy of simple respect.

Next time you attend a flag ceremony, I ask that you look at the young men and women presenting our nation's colors a few feet away from you. Know that whatever their role in America's military, they've taken an oath to defend this country, knowing that it could cost them their lives.

Please face them and the flag and stand at attention (shoulders straight, chest out). Place your right hand over your heart. If you're a man and you're wearing a hat, please take it off and hold it in your right hand.

The gesture is symbolic, of course, but symbols have power. That's why we have a flag.

Tim McClain is president of Humana Government Business, a wholly owned subsidiary of Humana Inc. After graduating from the U.S. Naval Academy in 1970, he served 20 years in the Navy and later served as general counsel for the U.S Department of Veterans Affairs from 2001-06.