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Wednesday, January 6, 2016

WHAT DOES SHE WANT???

I think the above question should read 'what does
she NEED? Men, here is your own write-up about what it takes to please your
wives. What does a wife really need from her husband? What is it that
moves a woman? Like really tickles her? Can a woman be truly satisfied by her
husband? Is it ever possible for a mortal man to relate with his wife in a
manner that will truly elicit appreciation from her because she has been
touched in her innermost being? What man hasn't wondered along one or more of
the above lines at some point or the other in their lives before? If we cast our minds back to the very beginning, at
the creation of both man and woman, one thing that stands out clearly is the fact
that the female was delicately put together by God. Check out the details again
in Genesis chapter 2. This explains why the woman is the way she is and why she
acts the way she acts, especially in relation to her husband. You have not
known how to relate with your wife consummately until you understand and
embrace her innate need for affection from you. Love is the language that a
woman understands! She was made to be the recipient of her husband's love. She
lives for it. She craves it, and if it is not forth coming, well then
you've got something else coming!

A woman who feels truly loved by her husband will
go to the ends of the earth and back for him. She will not misbehave. She will
strive to please him and his life will indeed be full of the rewards and
benefits of the love and attention he showers on her. This understanding should
inspire you to seek out practical ways of daily demonstrating your love to your
wife, because come to think of it, love is actually an action word; a verb if
you like! It is not enough to think good about her and wish her well in your
heart, that makes not much sense to her until it leaves the realm of the mind
and becomes a tangible reality that she can savor. No matter how grand
your intentions towards her, only the perceivable, palpable evident
demonstration of your love for her will tug at her heart and make her 'spoil
you silly' with all that your heart desires from her and even so much more!
Lol.

See, loving your wife genuinely makes her feel
secure. Everything a wife will do or not do, how she will do or not do it will
be determined by how secure she feels in her relationship with you. If anything
(or anyone for that matter) threatens her sense of exclusivity and security in
her relationship with you, no matter what else you do, she will have a hard
time relaxing with you and being the best she can be to you. Oh yes the
prevalent notion among the menfolk is that women are only about money and
material things, and that once that is in place you will have them exactly
where you want them as they will be over the moon with joy and acquiesce to
your every bidding! Not so guys; not completely so.

While I concur that a large number of women
consider a man's ability to provide for them a priority, but in the absence of a
proven caring, loving, sacrificial relationship where she feels secure and
valued, a woman's heart is not fully yours and so is her commitment. Think
for a minute about all that you wish your wife could and should be. All the
positive changes you desire in her. All that you have argued and fought over.
All that you have reported her about, insulted and harassed her about. All of
those traits in her that you can't stand. Well, a challenge is going out to you
now to consider a change of strategy!Abraham Lincoln said "Force is all-conquering,
but its victories are short lived."

Love conquers all!

Love wins hands down where all other weapons fail.

Love cannot be defeated, no matter what.

Love will laugh last, always. And that is because
love is the very nature and essence of God. So just like God always wins, love
too will win in the end!

Song of Songs 8:7

7 Many waters cannot quench love,
neither can the floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his
house for love, it would utterly be contemned.

Truth be told, a loved wife will not
misbehave! A controlling, uncooperative, difficult, quarrelsome and hard
-to-get-along-with wife can only be 'tamed' by relating with her patiently and
affectionately, instead of harping on her obvious weaknesses and rubbing
it in that she's no good. You don't want her to live up to that, do
you? So, embark on a mission of finding out how to demonstrate unalloyed,
transparent, consistent love and affection to your wife. If there are
other issues bothering you about your marriage, and I'm sure there are, well
why not start out by being obedient to God first? Do your part and then leave
God to help you sort out the rest, in response to your own gesture and
initiative of love. After all, we Christians (who are the bride of Christ )
respond to our Lord Jesus and serve Him the way we do because He took the
initiative of love."We love Him because He
first loved us." 1 John 4:19. Rather than wait for us to be
'worthy' of His love and care, He took the first step of loving us in spite of
our shortcomings, and then we had no choice but to reciprocate His gesture.
That's exactly the way it is with women!

Wondering how to go about it?

Act lovingly towards her despite how you feel right
now and right away!

Send a text message or an audio message, call to
find out how her day is going, handle that matter she has been complaining
about, do something selfless like offering to help her with some chores or
staying with the children while she takes a nap or fixes her hair, appreciate
her efforts at housekeeping or taking care of the children; whatever! Just pour
goodness into her.