Op/Ed

Here We Go Again: a shooting, a white male
perpetrator, a rejection, victim-blaming

Posted May 24, 2018 10:30 am | Op-Ed

By
Laura Finley

It is infuriating to write what feels like the same
piece multiple times, in way too rapid succession, but
here we go again: a shooting, a white male perpetrator,
a rejection, and victim-blaming.

On May 18, 2018, Dimitrios Pagourtzis shot and killed
10 people and wounded more than a dozen at Santa Fe High
School in Santa Fe, Texas. According to school officials
there were no “red flags.” To the knowledgeable eye
there actually were. We need address what is known about
school shooters and create appropriate prevention
programs.

Almost always, the shooters are white males who have
issues with females, be it rejections or overtly abusive
relationships. The red flag: his persistent and
increasingly angry pursuit of a young lady despite her
lack of interest.

One of Pagourtzis’ targets was Shana Fisher, who,
according to news reports, over four months repeatedly
rejected his advances.

Allegedly, she finally stood up to him in class,
which was an embarrassment. That he targeted a girl in
whom he was interested is sadly and horrifically normal
in the U.S. Virtually all of the school shooters in
modern times have targeted a dating partner or someone
who spurned their advances.

Nickolas Cruz, the Parkland, Florida school shooter,
had abused both his mother and his former girlfriend. In
March, Austin Wyatt Rollins shot a girl he had dated and
another boy in a Baltimore school. In April, Alek
Minassian drove a van into a crowd, murdering 10 people
in Toronto. Minassian claims to be part of the “incel,”
or involuntarily celibate culture, which aims to punish
women for denying men like him sex. He was inspired by
Elliot Rodgers’ May 2014 attack that killed six and
wounded 14. Rodgers had recorded a video on YouTube in
which he explained that he intended to punish women for
rejecting him. These men imagine themselves to be the
victims and media plays along.

As is typical, mainstream media, when it covers this
part of this part of the story, has reinforced the
notion that somehow it was her fault for rejecting him.
“Spurned advances provoke Texas shooting,” read one
ridiculous headline.

Pagourtzis was described as a “sweet, nice boy.”
Trying to explain away these atrocities is problematic,
as it presumes that something must have prompted these
good guys to turn to the dark side.

This “himpathy,” as Kate Manne has called it, is
nowhere more clear than in the six-month prison sentence
of Stanford rapist Brock Turner. His reputation matters
– hers not so much. She should sacrifice. She should
give in. She should protect his precious feelings.

Some sources outside the mainstream media, like
Salon, noted that we live in a culture in which women
are to accept and even appreciate a man’s attention,
even if it is unwanted.

Mary Elizabeth Williams wrote in Salon that this is
about “getting called a bitch when you ignore a harasser
on the street. About being passed over in your industry
because your boss finds you too bangable or not bangable
enough. This is about policing the attire of schoolgirls
because they’re a ‘distraction,’ rather than teaching
boys about maturity and respect in a world that contains
females.”

Despite the clear linkage between hegemonic
masculinity and lethal violence, school officials
continue to disregard this warning sign. They look for
“creepy” behavior, and fail to interpret incessant and
aggressive pursuit of an uninterested girl as such.

Again, I offer this advice. Please, can we include
teaching about healthy and unhealthy relationships as a
mandatory part of our school curricula? Can we please
implore media to research or at least talk to experts on
abuse and assault? And can we, as parents, vow to talk
to our kids, especially our boys, about how to handle
rejection?

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Laura Finley, Ph.D., teaches
in the Barry University Department of Sociology &
Criminology and is syndicated by PeaceVoice.