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Hello, all. Terribly sorry that I haven’t posted the winner of the quote contest! I’ve been extremely busy – new baby sister, grandfather passed away, high school and college courses, and a generally crazy life! But! Enough with the excuses!

I’ve decided that it’s high time I have a quote contest, complete with a prize. (Yes, a prize!)

The Setup – I have fifty quotes below, totaling 175 total points – one point per character you guess correctly, and one point for the movie title. (I also have three TV show quotes. As a bonus, if you give me the title of the particular episode that this quote comes from, I’ll give you an extra point. There’s also a musical quote in there somewhere… because I love musicals….) There are a few repeats, too – these are not all from different movies.

Rules – There’s only one rule: No looking up the answers on Google, IMDb, or any other quote sites. (Or else… I’ll track you down. I’ve hunted lions and tigers in Africa, so it will be easy to track you down. No funny business.)

Bonus Points – If you’d like to get bonus points (because there are no freebies… [aka obvious like “Sink me!”] Well, some of them should be obvious….), you can post about this contest on your blog and leave a comment below with the link, and I’ll add five bonus points to your total score.

Prize – Because it’s insanely long (I meant it to be that way because I wanted to test your fortitude… muahahaha…), I’ve included a prize. Besides the fact that you’ll have bragging rights for life, you get your very own cutout of Rapunzel and Flynn, made by my sister Arwen!

Take your pick – flowers or Tangled Purple? (The tower is a little disproportionate…. Whatev.)

I will mail the cutout of your choice to you. (If you don’t want to give me your address, we’ll figure something else out. A chapter of my novel, maybe?)

Contest Ending – The contest will end on next Wednesday night, March 13th (unless I tell you otherwise). I’ll post the winner as soon as possible after that.

Leave a comment below with your answers. (Be sure to include each character’s name and the movie it comes from. If you can’t remember something, put a question mark or a blank.)

(Terribly sorry the numbering won’t work!! I’ve messed with it and tweaked it for about fifteen or twenty minutes and I can’t get it to work. If you could number them on your own, that would be great!)

Have fun!!!

Character 1: It’s a piece of cake.

Character 2: You mean it ain’t gold?

Character 1: There’s a guard.

Character 2: I’ll go snap his neck.

Character: Beauty knows no pain, girls!

Character: The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don’t know what they’re doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino.

Character: I’m an astronomer, not a doctor! I mean, I am a doctor, but I’m not that kind of doctor. I have a doctorate, it’s not the same thing. You can’t help people with a doctorate. You just sit there and you’re useless!

Character: Sir, please dismount the banister.

Character 1: I can’t do this, [Character 2]. Character 2: I know. It’s all wrong. By rights we shouldn’t even be here. But we are. It’s like in the great stories, [Character 1]. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn’t want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, [Character 1], I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something. Character 1: What are we holding onto, [Character 2]? Character 2: That there’s some good in this world, [Character 1]… and it’s worth fighting for!

Character: Our evil plan is working.

Character: You may kill me, but you’ll never destroy the ideals of Camelot!

Character: What is that? What’re you doing? What is that? What’re you doing? That caviar is a garnish.

Character 1: Do you not know that in the service… one must always choose the lesser of two weevils?

Character 2: He who would pun would pick a pocket.

Character 1: You know, I honestly wish there was something between us…

Character 2: What?

Character 1: A continent.

Character 1: All right. Here’s the plan. In the dead of night, you and I grab some provisions, hijack one of those… one of those longboats… and then, we… row back to Spain like there’s no mañana! Character 2: [pauses] Back to Spain, yeah? Character 1: Yeah. Character 2: [uncertainly] In… a rowboat. Character 1: Yeah! Character 2: [sarcastically] Great. Sensational. That’s your plan, is it? Character 1: That’s… pretty much it, yeah. Character 2: [delighted] Well, I like it! So, how do we get on deck? Character 1: [pauses, deep breath] In the dead of night, you and I grab some provisions, hijack one of those… longboats…

Character: He died?! And this is supposed to be a kids’ movie!

Character: Bonjour, mesdames et monsiuers. Yesterday we have learned the correct way how to boil water. Today we will learn the correct way how to crack an egg. Voilà! An egg. Now, an egg is not a stone; it is not made of wood, it is a livingthing. It has a heart. So when we crack it, we must not torment it. We must be merciful and execute it quickly, like with the guillotine.

Character: Before the Civil War, the states were all separate. People used to say “United States are.” Wasn’t until the war ended, people started saying “The United States is.” Under Lincoln, we became one nation.

Character 1: I want always to be a boy, and have fun. Character 2: You say so, but I think it is your biggest pretend.

Character: I’d imagine the whole world was one big machine. Machines never come with any extra parts, you know. They always come with the exact amount they need. So I figured, if the entire world was one big machine, I couldn’t be an extra part. I had to be here for some reason. And that means you have to be here for some reason, too.

Character: She makes coffee nervous.

Character: It hasn’t happened yet, you fool, and don’t you dare tell anyone!

Character 1: I hate Pa – pa – Pastahazootie, or whatever the name of this town is. Character 2: Quaddy. Character 1: Yeah. I don’t want to cure anybody here. They all deserve to have whatever they have.

Character 1: She is to tell us stories! She is-….Character 2: Dead. Character 3: Tragic. Character 4: Awful. Good shot, though.

Character: No matter how loud you shout, you will not drown out the voice of the people!

Character: There’s only one God, ma’am.

Character: What would you have me do? Seek for the patronage of some great man and like a creeping vine on a tall tree, crawl upward where I cannot stand alone? No, thank you! Be a buffoon in the vile hope of teasing out a smile on some cold face? No, thank you! Eat a toad for breakfast each morning? Make my knees callous? Cultivate a supple spine? Wear out my belly groveling in the dust? No, thank you! With my left hand, scratch the back of any swine that roots up gold for me, while my right, too proud to know his partner’s business, takes in the fee? No, thank you! Shall I use the fire God gave me to burn incense all day long? No, thank you! Struggle to insinuate my name into the columns of the Gazette? Calculate, scheme, be afraid? Love more to make a visit than a poem? Seek introductions, favors, influences? No, thank you! No, I thank you and again, I thank you!

Character 1: [Character 2]? Yeah, he was here, but he put an egg in his shoe and beat it.

Character 1: You will marry Gabriella by the next full moon or I will strike at you in any way I can.

Character 2: What’s it to be, Father – hot oil or the rack?

Character 1: (flustered) I will simply deny you the crown and…live forever!

Character 1: Let me make this as… monosyllabic as possible. I… don’t much care for this crew you hired. They’re… how did I describe them, [Character 2]? I said something rather good this morning before coffee. Character 2: ‘A ludicrous parcel of driveling galoots,’ ma’am. Character 1: There you go. Poetry.

Character: Twisted every way, what answer can I give?

Character: Would you have me challenge the countess to a duel?

Character: A diversion!

Character: Have this man courtmarshalled and sent to the Russian front. And believe me – I can do that.

Character 1: The man out of time!Character 2: I’m not the one that’s out of time.

Character: I can’t believe it. I’m losing to a rug.

Character: That… is a very good… tree.

Character1: Do you really think there is only one perfect mate? Character 2: As a matter of fact, I do. Character 1: Well then how can you be certain to find them? And if you do find them, are they really the one for you or do you only think they are? And what happens if the person you’re supposed to be with never appears, or, or she does, but you’re too distracted to notice? Character 2: You learn to pay attention. Character 1: Then let’s say God puts two people on Earth and they are lucky enough to find one another. But one of them gets hit by lightning. Well then what? Is that it? Or, perchance, you meet someone new and marry all over again. Is that the lady you’re supposed to be with or was it the first? And if so, when the two of them were walking side by side were they both the one for you and you just happened to meet the first one first or, was the second one supposed to be first? And is everything just chance or are some things meant to be?

Character: My head is starting to get fuzzy…. Why did you come, again? I forget.

Character: Do you still tell the time, clock friend? I can’t tell by the expression on your face….

Character: Is the Popemobile Catholic?

Character: The salted pork is especially good.

Character: May a dead man say a few words to you, general, for your enlightenment? You will never rule the world… because you are doomed. All of you who demoralized and corrupted a nation are doomed. Tonight you will take the first step along a dark road from which there is no turning back. You will have to go on and on, from one madness to another, leaving behind you a wilderness of misery and hatred. And still, you will have to go on… because you will find no horizon… see no dawn… until at last you are lost and destroyed. You are doomed, captain of murderers. And one day, sooner or later, you will remember my words…