Friday, September 15, 2006

Why a Duck?

Get it? You will soon. In the meantime, if you haven't seen all the Marx Brothers movies, go rent them. If you can, start with "A Night at the Opera," and wait patiently for the stateroom scene. Then watch the other movies and find out which one the Why a Duck joke is in; I can't remember just now.

So. Back to the duck I intended to talk about. We recently returned from a great vacation in Wellfleet, our favorite village in Cape Cod. I was going through our receipts and found one from my favorite fun stuff and fun kitsch shop. (I am a kitsch ho. But most of it isn't displayed because it makes my friends nervous.) One receipt, unlike any others, had been handwritten. The items I bought are already displayed at home. But when I read the list, I was shocked to find: "Wooden duck hook."

Here is the "wooden duck hook":

Yeah, it's a duck, all right. The cashiers live and work in Wellfleet, a FISHING VILLAGE on CAPE COD. And they must get strafed by ducks and duck doo and ducks dropping clams and crabs on rocks and duck cries along the beach. Well, guess what, girls? I was born in Long Beach, CA and grew up near Huntington Beach, CA and even despite all the years I spent on the beach with my head baking in the sun, I managed to learn the difference between this kind of bird and ducks.

Here's the receipt, just for proof (see item #3, for $7.00):

And, yeah, I also got two excellent early-print etchings of whales and sea turtles. But at least those were listed by the appropriate name of the artist. Glad the cashier didn't try to identify the animals depicted.