We write about widowhood as we live it. Together we examine the good, the bad, and the ugly parts of life as a widowed person. The views expressed here are those held by each individual author. We take no credit for their brillance; we just provide them with a forum for expressing their widowed journey in words that are uniquely their own.

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Widowed Friends ......

...... are some of the most amazing friends I've ever had.
Hands down.

And I've had some pretty amazing friends.
For years.
In my "before".
And in my "after".

I'm not saying that widowed people are better friends.
I've had some non-widowed friends that would be pretty hard to beat.
Not that I'm comparing.
Because I'm not.

There's no comparing people ...... which I think is for the best.

It's just that most widowed people that I've met, and friended, are so ...... easy.

No, not "easy" in THAT way! Sheesh.
I know exactly where some of your minds went.
Shame on you.
:)

They're "easy" ...... as in ...... easy to talk to, easy to be around, easy to joke with (especially with that very dark "widowed humor"), easy to laugh with, easy to sit with and say nothing, easy to express my grief to, easy to cry with, easy to vent with, super-easy to hug and ...... easy to love.

I feel so very blessed to count many of you as my friends.
Even if we haven't met I.R.L.*

Some people (almost always non-widowed) find that difficult to understand.
But you don't.

And I love that about you.

I love a lot about you.
And I treasure every friend I've made ...... in my "after".

But you know what I love most about you?
The one thing that tops all of the other dozens of reasons to love you?

It's that you know, in spite of how much I love you (and it's a lot) ...... and totally understand ......

...... that I'd give you all up in a heartbeat, if that would bring Jim back.

But since we all know that's not going to happen ......
I'm so very glad that we're friends.

2 comments:

and NJ peeps!!!!! Love you. And you are so right about it all - the comfort level of a widowed friend is just different, no matter how much our non widowed friends support and try, it's just not the same. And impossible to describe to those who haven't had the "opportunity" to join our club. And yes, would give you up in a heartbeat if I could have my Dave back or you could have Jim back. But like you, I know that is not happening. And as I have said many times in the past, so thankful that God put you in my "after" - I still question so much about "why" - but I know He knew what He was doing when he had our paths cross. xoxo

Janine! Had a blast in NYC! Hope your Mother's Day flight home was ok. You are so right about "the hugs" I think widowed people truly understand why we need those hugs!! You are the best, and like Beth, I second the thought that God must have had our paths cross for a reason....