I can still remember the day we met. She swam by and glanced at me, with a look that was so shy… Well, not shy, really, it was more — what’s the word? — demure. No, bashful… actually, more like coquettish… Flirtatious? Sly? Sneaky-lookish? Hang on, it’ll come to me…

(Oh, man, this scam works like a dream. I just put on the shark suit, hum that “dun-dun-dun-dun” theme music, and this bozo drops the kibble and runs out of the house screaming! And the best part is, I have it all to myself… Wait, what’s that music coming from behind me?)