​Southern Decadence is one of the largest LGBT events in New Orleans. Every Labor Day weekend thousands of visitors descend on the city to party and have a good time. The annual Southern Decadence parade is a much-anticipated event; which features the official Grand Marshals.

New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. is the entity that raises money for the parade and various charities in New Orleans. Locals in the LGBT community and businesses give thousands of dollars to support Southern Decadence, not to mention each Grand Marshal host several events to help raise money.

New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc., state that they are a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization on their sponsorship application Which means they can raise money as a tax-exempt organization defined by the Internal Revenue Service tax codes. Having a 501(c)(3) tax-exemption allows money collected, to possibility be tax-deductible on personal and business federal tax returns. To decide if New Orleans Southern Decadence is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization research was conducted by looking under the Exempt Organizations Select Tool of the I.R.S. and no listing was found, therefore, I called the Internal Revenue Service and spoke with a Mr. Reece (100057****), a complete search was conducted using the name(s), addresses, cities, and zip code(s) as listed in the database of the Louisiana Secretary of State, at the time this article was posted the I.R.S. could not verify New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. had or currently is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization, nor was an application submitted. As a matter of fact, according to Ambush Magazine in their Nov. 22 – Dec. 5, 2016 edition, New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. paid $15.00 to the Louisiana Secretary of State to file their annual report; however according to the state’s database they are not in good standing for failure to file an annual report. So, what did they file?

​I find it strange that New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc., does not list anywhere on their website the EIN number that would have been given when their application was approved. When you give cash you never receive a receipt, which all 501(c)(3) organizations are required to give when requested. New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. has never posted or made available their annual reports. Unless you count the information they post in Ambush; which cannot be confirmed.

This raises concerns about the people overseeing the company. Do they know that they are cheating the public out of money? By stating a falsehood. According to a source at the United States Justice Department, “it’s considered fraud to state that you are a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization if you do not have proper documentation of the fact”. The Justice Dept. takes all accusations of fraud seriously, and there is a possibility that state statutes might have been violated. All 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organizations must abide by certain rules; such as, when holding a fundraising event where money is raised, funds should go directly to the charity. New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. may deduct certain expenses directly related to the event, but nothing outside the described event. So, where does that leave the parade? Can money be raised under a 501(c)(3) and spent on a parade (including insurance, permits, police details, costumes, and sanitation/cleanup, etc.)? Does the parade directly benefit any charity?

So, what happens to Southern Decadence? An event founded on the principle of having fun and being decadent. Is Southern Decadence as we know it coming to an end? It is a shame in my opinion when a company deceives the public and local businesses by asking for money under a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt status when in fact they are not and never were! I remember a saying that someone once told me, "never fool around with the I.R.S., sooner or later they will come knocking and wanting answers" when that day comes Southern Decadence might return to its original purpose. Until then we wait!

UPDATE: It appears that New Orleans Southern Decadence, Inc. has filed their annual report with the State of Louisiana. However, that doesn't mean they are compliant with the Federal tax codes regarding 501(c)(3). At the time of this posting (8/3/2017 3:15 AM CST) New Orleans Southern Decadence Inc. sponsorship form still, states their a 501(c)(3) corporation.

We welcome you to Southern Decadence; one of the largest LGBT events in New Orleans. Held during Labor Day weekend this event draws thousands of visitor's to the city of New Orleans each year. To ensure that you're safe we have put together a few tips and suggestions. For frequently asked questions visit: southerndecadence.net . For a list of events visit: events

WELCOME TO SOUTHERN DECADENCE

It is important to know that during Southern Decadence some street in and around the French Quarter are closed and do not allow parking on the streets. Remember to wear comfortable shoes since you will be doing a lot of walking. If your car is impounded you will have to contact the city (504) 565-7236 to find the location of your car and the cost could exceed more than $150.00.

Finding a clean bathroom will be almost impossible. Unless you are a paying customer most businesses will not allow you to use their restrooms. If you are planning on eating before make sure you use the restaurants bathroom. Remember urinating on the streets or on someone’s doorstep is against the law. You can be arrested and spending your time in central lockup isn't fun and will cost you more than $200.00 in fines.

Don't be surprised to see nudity and maybe some public sex. DON'T be tempted to indulge. Louisiana still has laws against obscenity and public nudity and sex, this includes inside any establishment. If you're going partake use extreme caution.

You are allowed to consume alcohol on the streets; however, glass and cans are not allowed. If you want to take your drinks onto the streets just ask the bartender for a "to go" cup (plastic). New Orleans is one of the only cities in the south where bars are open 24 hours, 7 days a week.

Remember to eat when drinking. The average temperature in Louisiana during August is 91 degrees and with the heat index 101 degrees. It is really easy to forget to eat. New Orleans is home to some of the world’s best restaurants.

Never bring your wallet when walking the streets, just carry cash, a credit/debit card, room key and your I.D. Southern Decadence will attract people who can pick-pocket you and you'll never know until it's too late. Don't bother wearing expensive jewelry, electric items, or anything that can't be easily replaced. Another simple rule to remember, never carry large amounts of money, once removed from your pocket you'll be a target.

If you feel you have had too much to drink, don't try to walk back to your hotel/lodgings alone. New Orleans neighborhoods can change without you even noticing it, and you can get lost. Always try to walk with others, and never alone.

Don't fall victim to the con artists, panhandlers, or beggars most will just want to scam you out of your money. Don't engage or encourage them, sad to say just simply ignore and walk away.

Never ever talk back or be disrespectful to law enforcement officers during Southern Decadence; you will come across members of the New Orleans Police, State Troopers and Sheriff's department. While these agencies have made incredible advances in LGBT awareness being disrespectfully or rude can get you into trouble. Remember they are there to protect you!

Never accept a drink if you don't know where it has come from or if you didn't see a bartender fix it. It is easy to get drugged, and assaulted. If this happens contact law enforcement a.s.a.p.

​Believe it or not, there was a time that if you wanted to meet someone you had to actually go to a bar and start a conversation. Long before social app sites like Grindr, Adam4Adam, Scruff, the interaction between two gay men could be told by the hanky code or “flagging”. This was more prevalent during the 60’s and 70’s in the leather and BDSM to covertly signal their sexual interests; this was at a time when being gay could get you arrested, beaten up or fired (one can still be fired for being gay).

In the past 10 years this method has somewhat fallen by the wayside; however, in the leather community, you can still find men that will flag their back pockets. I never understood the hanky code until I became more involved in the leather community, and trust me I asked questions. I found it fascinating that what originated in the 60’s and 70’s was still around. However, you can understand why it still exists; for some, it might be the tradition of the past, and for some, it might be the mystery of using one. Either way, it is a fading practice.

This history of the handkerchiefs is very interesting and while it is believed to have originated in New York City, in fact, it is based on a San Francisco tradition that date backs to the mid-1800. They were commonly used in the American West by cowboys, miners and rail engineers. When gold was discovered in 1848 the style was carried on by prospectors that flocked to California. In 1846 San Francisco’s population was about 200, however, after the Mexican-American War, the population would explode to roughly 36,000. But the percentage of the population were mostly men; therefore, men were forced to dance together at social, with some men wearing a blue bandanna to show that they were assuming the male leading part in the dance while others wore red bandannas to show they were taking the female following role in the dance.

It is a tradition that has seen many changes, but the basic colors and meaning will never change. Especially within the leather community. J. Franklin

​The modern use by gay men appears to date back to the early 1970’s when a journalist for the Village Voice joked that instead of using keys on the left or right pocket to indicate top or bottom in the bedroom – the prevailing custom of the time – instead, men should use colorful handkerchiefs that could be used to signal more specific interest.

​​Since then there are have been several variations with regards to the color of handkerchiefs for example; white = racists, gray = boring, baby blue = mother issues, pink = ingrained homophobia, and mustard = you drink too much. So it appears that like anything in life the hanky code is changing to meet the different terms of the gay community as it expands to include more within the community. Regardless of how you feel, the past meets the present and move forward to the future. It is these traditions that define our culture and allows us to express ourselves in different and unique ways.Sources:​GLBT Historical Society Archives & Museum. Archives & Research Center. San Francisco, CA. Online. 19 July, 2017.The Village Voice. Archives. New York City, NY. Online. 19 July, 2017.Images: istockphoto.com. Purchased for commercial use.

​As we all know falling in love is the easiest part of a relationship or any relationship for that matter. The hardest part of any relationship is commitment and keeping the relationship going. Experts claim that passionate love only last 2 to 4 years, which can create problems for any relationship, and that mutual respect and compatibility then become increasingly important. However, if you are gay (homosexual) you understand that keeping a relationship health is hard work.

Most gay relationships today never last past 5 years according to Psychologist Jess Bering. He states “that for most gay relationship it is at this point that either one or both partners will “fall out of love” or “disinterested”. It is important to understand that in the animal kingdom the primary goal of most male species is to reproduce. Humans are no different, but for some couples a legal marriage prevents most from going outside of their relationship (we know this is not always the case), and only because there are legal consequences.

​"Heartbreak is every bit as much a psychological adaptation as is the compulsion to have sex with those other than our partners, and it throws a monster of a monkey wrench into the evolutionists' otherwise practical polyamory." Psychologist Jesse Bering

​Mutual respect and compatibly then becomes increasingly important as the relationship progresses. Here are a few tips that might help gay couples to remain committed to your partner.

Communicate - This is key for a long lasting relationship. Never allow small frictions in your relationship to be blown out of proportion. Be open and honest with your partner about what you are thinking and feeling, big or small. If you are bothered by something then speak up and discuss the issue together and remember once resolved it is over. Don't go back and rehash or live a problem. Spend quality time together - the demands of life and work will always affect your relationship. It is equally important to establish time together or "Us" time. Together you should both block our time on your calendar and schedule other commitments around that date.Experiment with sex - No matter what you do avoid at all cost "gay/lesbian bed death." Sexual passion and activity diminished in long term homosexual relationships, it's going happen. It does take some effort to spice up your sex life. Both of you should consider exploring activities you've never done before. Don't ever exceed your partner's boundaries, there should be a frank, open and honest discussion about each other limits, and there should always be respect. For example, try doing some role play, this will allow each other to explore another side of sex without feeling pressure.Keeping a relationship fresh - This can be some work, but in the long run it is well worth it. Try introducing elements of surprise or anything fresh in your relationship; this will help you remain committed to your partner. Sending flowers without an occasion or an extraordinary active will help keep a relationship vibrant and interesting.Avoid Jealousy - Unfortunately jealousy in all too common in the gay community. Without a doubt it will destroy any relationship. Jealousy mostly occurs when either one or both don't trust each other. We you have to start checking email, social media, call or texting all of the time, knowing where each other is at all times; there is no trust, and without trust there is no relationship (healthy at least). If you feel controlled by your partner you should confront and have a discussion, express how your feeling and resolve any issues. Compromise - It is easy to always feel that you're right. To have a good relationship you need to always keep an open mind about any situation. This involves keeping your relationship on a even ground and establishes balance.

Just always know what you get out of any relationship is what you put into it. This is two people working together for a common goal, to be happy, healthy, understanding each other, accepting their faults, never expecting them to live up to you expectations, and above all trust.

Yesterday evening members of Roundup held a fundraising event at the World War II Museum. The event was to raise money for addiction recovery benefiting the LGBTQ community in New Orleans.​Various works of art were up for auction, representing assorted cultural paintings, and assorted items. Last night current reigning Southern Decadence Grand Marshal Princess Stephaney entertained the audience with her humor, wit, and selected performances.

This year New Orleans Roundup with be held at the Double Tree Hotel August 11 - 13, 2017, and will host several speakers and workshops. Participates this year will include Alcoholic Anonymous, Al-Anon, Crystal Meth Anonymous, and Adult Children of Alcoholics. If you are interested in attending visit or registration: nolaroundup.com

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