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Sunday, October 14, 2007

on becoming a television junkie

Y'all, I am procrastinating. I realized today how bad it has gotten when I thought to myself, "Okay, it's Sunday. What's on TV tonight?". Having existed for quite some time with just rabbit ears, I find myself intrigued with the clear picture my friends' Direct TV service gives them. And truthfully, not only am I intrigued with their reception, I am intrigued with OTHER PEOPLE'S FAKE LIVES!!! Oh heavens.I guess it's because I'm comfortable. I've done a lot of hard work where my marriage and Jackson are concerned, and I've learned a lot about God and about myself. I am passionate about God. I am passionate about others' relationships with God. And I'm fairly comfortable with my spiritual life.Comfortable is scary. Things are going well for me in comparison to the previous 12 months. But I know God is calling me to more. I look at my Bible, and quite frankly, I am afraid. That said, I desire to know what God is wanting to teach me. And I know it's good to take breaks for renewal...and I feel I've done that. But now it's time to dive back in. And I just don't feel like it.

Proverbs 24:12 says Don't try to avoid responsibility by saying you didn't know about it. For God knows your hearts, and he sees you. He keeps watch over your soul, and he knows you knew! And he will judge all people according to what they have done.

I know I have a responsibility to fervently seek what God is doing and how he plans to use me. Truly, my desire is to be obedient. Because I know that to be obedient is to be blessed. Plus, I love God.

Psalm 119:45 says I will walk in freedom, for I have devoted myself to your commandments.

So in my pursuit of freedom accessed only through Christ, I will have to lay the clicker down. And it's not that it's the television that I'm so drawn to, it's the brainlessness of it. It takes zero energy to watch tv. Sadly, I have found pleasure in laziness. And we all know, folks, that being lazy is sinful.

I'll give you all a marriage update this week. Please continue to pray for our hearts and that God's voice would be the loudest of all. Also, please specifically pray that I am a faithful steward of time and money, that my work schedule and blessings would really start to work themselves out this week, and that the Enemy will BACK OFF!