Carmen Harra, Ph.D.

10 Steps to Total Transformation

Be it a metamorphosis of the mind, an emotional evolution, or a physical enhancement, we must all learn to change. Change is the number one law of the universe, but personal evolution requires work and often forces us to step out of our comfort zone. Let’s face it, change can be a scary thing! But if we perceive change as a source of empowerment rather than a painful part of life, we can begin to embrace necessary shifts and benefit from their powerful impact on our lives. Take my 10 steps to totally transform your life in wonderful ways:

1. Evaluate what you need to change: This is not to say that one day you'll pack up your things and leave your home and family to start a new life as a pop singer (although that would be fun!). But we each have something we don't like about ourselves - the shape of our eyebrows, the way we criticize others, that we lose patience too easily, etc. When these small problems are corrected, we feel a world of a difference. We just carry ourselves differently and give off more self-confidence. This is why it's so important to sit down and make a list of what you really want to change about yourself. But don't go overboard! Chances are, the Divine made you absolutely perfect, and you only need a tiny bit of tweaking. Hey, you deserve it too! Small personal improvements go a long way in improving our overall state of mind, balancing our emotions, and boosting self-esteem levels.

2. Visualize the new you and write out your steps to get there: You have to have a clear picture in your mind of what you want to achieve and how you plan to achieve it. This holds true for anything in life. If you want to attract a different situation in your life, you need first to imagine it and draw up a step-by-step plan of how to achieve it. Start by writing "Point A" and "Point B," on a blank piece of paper, the former being where you are now and the latter being where you want to be. How far are the two points? Are you closer to your ideal life than you think? What are the logical steps to reach Point B, and what's the first step to start your journey?

3. Acknowledge the patterns of your past: Accept that you may be bound to certain patterns from your past which you are now ready to let go of. Perhaps you have built up a bad habit of avoiding exercise at all costs or snacking before bedtime for years, which has led to being overweight. Acknowledge that certain areas of your lives are moving about in circles, and that it is exactly these areas which need to be targeted for betterment and change.

4. Release the fear: Fear binds us to past experiences and doesn't allow room for change or improvement. When we're afraid, we subconsciously sabotage our possibilities. The fear in our minds acts as a barrier between us and our goals. Place your fears aside and watch your confidence - and potential - grow. Wake up tomorrow unafraid of anything.

5. Reset your mindset: Expand your possibilities by leaving behind what you thought you knew in exchange for what you will learn ahead. Forget about what you've learned until now; your greatest lessons are ahead.

6. Be alert for opportunities: Now that your fear has been diminished, new opportunities may come to you in an instant. Always be on the lookout for a new prospect. We often bypass opportunities because we think "this is too good to be happening to me!" or we think we don't merit them. Opportunities are all around us, if only we open our eyes to them and seize them instead of letting them pass.

7. Do something drastic to get unstuck: Sometimes, it takes an intervention to turn the wheel around. If you're not happy with any aspect of your physical self, look into more serious options. If you're miserable in a relationship, end it. If your job has you fed up, quit. There is no reason for you to remain in a situation which is less than ideal for you. Don't fear the outcome of a drastic move if it's intended with positive effects.

8. Create a new physical reality: Make that change happen! There is nothing wrong with trying on a new appearance, moving into a new home if the situation calls for it, or updating your philosophies. Change doesn't happen because we think, "I should change someday." It happens when we take charge.

9. Engage in a new love: Take up new hobbies, habits, and activities. Even recreations need to be updated once in a while! Discover a hidden talent by trying something completely new and unfamiliar. Even if you're not good at it, you'll benefit from the bonding experience of a salsa class with your best friend or a course in the Japanese language. Engaging in new things will remind you that everything is possible if you're willing to try.

10. Keep up the new you until new habits form: You may have changed your wardrobe, your habits, and your outlook on life, but now what? You have to live up to the new you! Continue to engage in the changes you've made until they become a part of your life. Don't revert back to old habits. In time, new habits will settle in and will become normal, day-to-day experiences.