[write five things • people's names, places, emotions, film titles, song titles, bands... anything that sums up your day • do this each day on listography • copy and paste this so others know what this list is about]

08/31 Fri → "#ArethaHomegoing;" the concept of a "homegoing" seems so reverent • ACEN HUNGER GAMES, I was a nervous wreck at the keyboard, but scored a Hyatt room! • it's hard fathoming the possibility people actually *like me* and that I can be their *friend* but I have to properly wrap my mind around it in order to maintain friendships • it's hard to read at home, I have to play chill/low-fi music in the background • mowed the front lawn pre-drizzle and the back lawn mid-drizzle, and by the time I finished, it was a thunderous downpour

08/30 Thu → Ma brought tamales but they were too spicy (for me, that is) • overheard from a woman in the bathroom: "that's a Spike Lee film for ya, he puts it in your face" • after minutes of silence over the coffee shop music speakers, they played Lorde's "Ribs" followed by the rest of Pure Heroine on shuffle, and I had absolutely no problem with that ღ • researching fact versus fiction from BlacKkKlansman • the ground beef I cooked wasn't seasoned well enough, yet I still overate at dinner

08/29 Wed → anxious and avoidant, yet during in-person conversation, I'm absolutely happy, like nothing's the matter at all • a really good hair day! I hardly ever feel confident about my hair • 10/10 my biggest turn-off among men is a quick tempter • Bro: "I gotta get through bread first" me: get through bread? that sounds like a problem?? Bro: "of course it is, someone has to eat it" • while prepping rice for dinner, I looked out the kitchen window and noticed the evening sky was a gorgeous pink hue

08/28 Tue → the pumpkin spice latte is back at The 'Bucks; enticing, except it's 90 degrees outside • caught up on Bachelor in Paradise • "if you were a type of cheese, what type of cheese would you be?" after consulting my local deli man, I think I'd be mozzarella • summer rain storm this afternoon, Ma made a poncho for a woman out of a garbage bag • didn't finish the summer event in FGO, trying not to sulk about it, but here I ammmm

08/27 Mon → "having thick thighs means you can fit more puppies on your lap" ※ • dad says the coffee is better here than it is in the Loop; thus, I genuinely believe the coffee wells around here are better than the wells in the Loop • the Catholic fb group asked for favorite titles when invoking the Blessed Mother in prayer, and no one replied "Mama Lupe" • sweltering heat • thoughts about eighth grade (as well as Eighth Grade, the movie)

08/25 Sat → eden invitation • "why don't you eat out tonight so your Bro and I can order (spicy) Aurelios pizza" lol okay Ma • the "win a trip to London" promo at Blick featured corgis and my heart melted • speaking of heat, there was a lot of humidity in the air this afternoon • 67 months together ღ (played FGO and baked succulent-shaped sugar cookies)

08/24 Fri → the nurse told Ma that I was "nice" and would totally hire me as an RN after I finished nursing school • "you don't live in the moment much, do you?" oh boy you should've seen me yesterday • the barista said "have a nice day" and I replied "thanks, you too!" then she said "ohhh I'll try!" and I'm still thinking about her odd reply • kill a half hour DJ: "I've never seen the Washington Monument!" tfw I've seen a non-Chicago landmark somebody hasn't seen • received Jesse's PoGO gift from Portillo's *before* picking up Portillo's for dinner? is he an esper??

08/22 Wed → school's back in session, which means more avoiding awkward interaction with the crossing guard (my grammar school classmate's mom) and haphazardly crossing the street at a non-crosswalk • the library was closed for a staff meeting(??) lo and behold, I went to The 'Bucks instead • grabbed a cup of Whole Foods lobster soup and a roll of pretzel bread and snuck my dinner into the theater • Alice sat beside me at the theater! and I didn't even know until Eric came in and greeted her! was it coincidence or chance (or fate)? • ok see, what's the point of loving you when you can't even love yourself?

08/21 Tue → stayed up until 3am, organizing youtube playlists no one cares about (lowkey, *I* care about those playlists) • listened to a lot of Aimer during my walk this afternoon, thinking about how I heard her perform *live* last month • me: seize the day, get dat $6 carwash; Bro: "yeah! gotta clean them tires" • Deedee's last day volunteering, she's going downstate for college! Portillo's catering at the front desk~ • melancholy sets in this evening, like a cloud covering up the last bit of the visible, night sky

08/20 Mon → anxiety, because I should've replied to him sooner • was able to fit in some handlettering practice into the day • stumbled upon the Catholic side of youtube (hey there! long time no see) • could've watched Bachelor in Paradise, but instead caught a Shuckle (shuckles > drama) (or as bro phrased it, (shuckles = drama) • Bro made chicken caesar salad for dinner

08/19 Sun → waking up at 4am, jumping on an opportunity and joining in a friend's box split • there was a female protester yelling about the scandals to exiting parishioners after Mass; Catholicism is on the defense • frozen lemon bars!! • lighthearted conversations with Ma on our way to/from shopping at Burlington • watched Family Feud at the dinner table, skipping BB20, and mourning in advance of fallen hamster Scottie

08/18 Sat → things! worked! out! I got anxious over nothing because she tagged the wrong name hhaha • Ma granted me familial dispensation to attend Bayleef Community Day instead of Grandma's Memorial Mass/Afterparty (which she, herself, isn't even attending) • by the time I finished my latte, it was 4 in the afternoon • Ma bought a religious pendant at the mall, saying how she bought another one before for $5 and not for $10; the merchant made a few calls, saying it was supposed to be sold for $10, but gave it to her for $5 • meticulously organized my lists, listened to Death Cab for Cutie, feeling good

08/17 Fri → felt inclined to stay indoors, organizing notes and lists, nervous without a cause • after years and years of saying "I'd go," I finally saw the planes at the (rehearsal of the) Chicago Air & Water Show! bringing an umbrella was a good idea • finally got my long-anticipated root beer float • we are "two people," and to best challenge each other, I'm glad we are so different • stumbled upon the season finale of The Great British Bake Off

08/16 Thu → anddd this is exactly why I'm fearful of aspiring to have well-developed friendships • walked outside and into the humidity, reminding myself how I should find indoor activities today • *looks up at 9-foot sunflower* how am I supposed to admire you from down here • I think I've finally found peace with my voice; it's good enough for singing in the pews at church, and in the best way, that's all that really matters • cut myself in the ankle while shaving, and it took my breath away all evening

08/15 Wed → "I don't know" is just a phrase to keep my guard up • Feast of the Assumption, visited Old St. Pat's for the first time in seven years • once again, it's do-or-die, but I just don't feel the pressure • Eric couldn't remember the name of one of the LL! boys ("was it Michelle? Michael?") so we're just gonna call him Mishykle • genuinely in a happy mood at the dinner table

08/14 Tue → started off the day earlier, with food, and meds • values of the Dominican order: laudare, benedictere, pradicare • I rained on Bro's parade, telling him that it's gonna rain tomorrow (and thus, he probably shouldn't get his car washed) • genuinely inspired to come to terms with my problematic, lust-filled past • felt hungry (uncomfortable?) all evening, even after eating food • ran away from my responsibility for six months, and in short, I'm now terrified and overwhelmed

08/13 Mon → David Archuleta's "Crush" came out 10 years ago today, lol I'm not feeling any younger • there was a spider in my bedroom and the most disturbing part of all this was how I was completely unfazed • completely broke down upon realizing I broke my FGO JP streak, but somehow Eric talked me out of it • caved in, rewriting this month's "seven word memoirs" into "six word memoirs" welp, if you can't beat them, join them • I love the feeling of having Dad in my corner

08/12 Sun → "I gave you guys homework last week, did you remember to do it?" I take notes every week... this is unsettlingly easy • I ate a huge soft pretzel all by myself at the zoo, no shame • shout out to the guy on the bus who gave me my Eevee community day pin after I unknowingly dropped it • "the world is just one big In-N-Out" and other thoughts while sipping royal bubble tea • "those sunflowers... they're atomic" hhaha thanks, Ms. Carmen

08/11 Sat → driving practice, featuring breakfast at iHop! • imo I lived my best life today, divvying up my time between PoGO and non-PoGO activities • the Belmont/Addison stations on the blue line underwent construction, but despite that, I caught my respective busses and trains! • wrote a poem (google keep note) about social anxiety, mid-episodic breakdown • I feel so at-ease around the LL! boys, why is it that I feel less tension in face-to-face scenarios when I readily rely on written words to express my being

08/10 Fri → stayed in, playing mobile games, instead of reading • a stationary morning/afternoon • walked around the neighborhood in the early evening, got some steps in and overturned a gym • spent the $2 from T-Mobile Tuesday at Dunkin Donuts (before it expired at 11pm today) • What Would You Do episode, featuring a guy wearing a "MAGA" hat and later an "Impeach 45" shirt

08/09 Thu → high at-home tension, still • I just couldn't concentrate and do what I wanted to do for the first two hours • genuinely going to miss the peace and quiet (and so few people!) in the university library • checked out a new bakery in Chinatown, with Christian and Marcos • she apologized to me, but I don't need a material gift, as apologies aren't a token economy (but I do appreciate the token!)

08/08 Wed → thinking about Grampa, he would've been 90 years old • the highlight of my day was Bro taking me on a tour of the local PoGO gyms • caught up on episodes of BB20 and Bachelor in Paradise • what is luck? I said I didn't believe in luck, but am I luck-y? fortunate? suddenly realizing how ordinary good health might be more than ordinary • I wish Ma could be less of a mother and more of a person

08/07 Tue → downloaded Granblue Fantasy in anticipation of the Love Live! collab • instead of my usual, easy-to-pick-up spot, I waited underneath an awning for my ride-share driver because of the pouring rain • Ma got upset with me because I asked her why she doesn't write ("you just have to make time for it;") I realized that it's rather odd to journal, to allow words to flow from yourself to describe yourself • definitely viewing Jesse as a brother-like figure; our surface-level similarities are rather uncanny • finally felt inclined to overlook my photos from last month's California adventure

08/06 Mon → a cloudy morning, and a bit of rain • had a severe case of the hiccups, and in that moment, I wasn't living my best life • "you're not anti-social, you're asocial" ah good good, you know the difference, my dude • my instagram likes are the finest collection of friends' selfies, sunflowers, and corgis • Becca from The Bachelorette chose the emotional guy (Garrett) instead of the guy who shared similarities as her (Blake), I'm so relieved

08/05 Sun → driving with Ma (during a drizzle), and I'm only driving well when I'm eyeing the speedometer... sweats • how does one make smalltalk with a priest?? today I Tried • "you want a hot latte?" yes, I'll be inside all day • picked up Butler's Gender Trouble, but I wonder if Undoing Gender is better suited for my interests • I get way too invested in The $100,000 Pyramid every Sunday evening

08/04 Sat → 8am slipped into 11:30am, slight panic ensues • dare I become one of those people who can't start their day without coffee? • did I stay in my bedroom all day? • today's nutritional fuel: yesterday's leftovers • livestreamed Lollapalooza (Carly Rae Jepsen, Logic and Vampire Weekend were my favs)

08/03 Fri → CHVRCHES dropped a song featuring Wednesday Campanella?? cough, I liked Wednesday Campanella before they were cool, cough • read "Good Country People" and darn, that was messed up • decided to take myself on a date to a far northside coffee shop • the second I stepped into the car, I felt drained, and genuinely unhappy • "you have a smile on your face now" guess I just really needed food

08/02 Thu → I woke up at 11am, but Eric's "'positive attitude' balloon, 'minor setback' dart" cartoon got me on track for the day • I was still sad today, but went outside, and took photos of the first sunflower in bloom • started listography again! it's been 6ish months • Ma bought an aloe vera plant • Rachel was so blindsided on BB20, and this is truly an episode to go down in BB history

08/01 Wed → that "mistakenly writing '07' instead of '08' while journaling" feeling • overhearing dad, getting frustrated with a People's Gas employee over the phone • searching through my purse, and Eric putting his hand on my shoulder, chuckling for startling me • right right, I forgot feminist theory, religion, and Japanese mobile games are a rather odd combination of interests, no? • "what keeps you believing in faith" where I'm basically like a balloon, and Eric keeps me from blowing away in my own thoughts