The Bachelor

Like the mighty Phoenix rising from the ashes… Monday night heralded the rebirth of Television in 2010. And it all starts with…The Bachelor.

Taglined “on the wings of love” (I’ll give you a second with that one…) Jake has returned as the hunky moral compass from last season, trying to find his true love… and it may be harder than it seems.

it would appear a simple task… a charming, buff (does he get paid per shirtless scene?) successful pilot (the theme of the entire season by the way…) watches a “buffet of beauties” walk out of a limo…all vying for his affections. (Almost sounds like the basis of muslim heaven…doesnt it? Except that involves virgins…never mind) But the hardest part will be finding a “match” in the bunch—with the overwhelming selection of blatant beauty- over -brains the producers have given him as potentials.

In this the premiere episode, there was alot of familiar territory for Bachelor fans… 25 girl bios, 25 “he’s perfect for me” speeches, 25 awkward first impression moments and verging on over 25 shirtless sequences.

Here’s a wrap up of what we all really tune in for—

Cringe-worthy Bachelor Moments:

2 trips over dresses and high heels

A girl wears a fake wedding ring….and gives it to Jake. (insert major eye roll…)

A girl gives the first kiss of the season…and gets the first impression rose…(shocker!)

Jillian and Ed show up…to prove the show’s legitimacy (…)

In the end…10 girls go home. Which ones? I cant remember…nor will I miss any of them in particular. A bunch of blondes, a handful of Brunettes…and one of the two Canadians (who leaves with one last “co-pilot” cliche…)

Who stayed? Here goes…:

The Tennessee Mom

Sick Girl Ali

Blonde Christine

NYC Gia

Model Rozelyn

Flight Attendant

Another Blonde…Cory

“Homemaker” Alicia

Tripper Ashleigh

(Another) Blonde Catherine

“feel my heart” girl

Tenley (first impression)

Oakville Jessie

Dark-haired model Elizabeth

Whack-Job

An interesting bunch…I dont know whether there is enough depth (ability to string enough words together to form a complete conversation), but there is certainly enough… to look at.