Sunday, November 8, 2015

There's
been a lot on my mind lately, enough so that my mental processes have not been
able to make much progress on my second book. It's been like that for several
months, in truth and I'm disappointed to say that it doesn't look like I'll be
able to refocus until sometime in 2016.

Hopefully
sooner, rather than later, once I get all the plot tangles unsnarled for the
second half of Book 2. I'm quite grateful to have a critique group who can help
me with that, once I get everything organized( mentally and on paper )to show
and work through any problems that crop up.

Some
of my friends are participating in NaNoWriMo( National Novel Writing Month )
which started yesterday and runs for the entire month of November. The idea, in
case you aren't familiar with it, is to write - along with tens of thousands of
writers all over the world - to produce a minimum of 50,000 words in the month
of November. This gives many writers the support and the encouragement they
need not only to start but to finish
such a massive undertaking.

It's
not to say that I'll stop writing altogether, as has been the case when I hit a few speed bumps earlier this year and last. My current plan consists of getting
through the rest of 2015 while setting up my business and putting work into
individual chapters as I can, week to week.

2016
should see me return to regular writing, as I juggle the time budget between my
business, writing the remainder of Book 2 and eventually revising Book 1 into a
fourth draft that I will then send out sample chapters of two agents, seeking representation
for publication.

Looking
at things that way, it seems like the next year's going to be a busy and
productive one for me. Toss in a personal life and a day job and even the time
I set aside every week to write this blog will become precious.

A
company in Québec has launched a kick starter for a glowing foam-based LARP lightsaber,
one that can take a lot of abuse… unlike every other light-up lightsaber currently
on the market, which are either fragile or two solid to use in anything but the
gentlest manner when mock-fighting foes.

As
you can see from the image, the light saber looks pretty impressive, glowing
from the inside while still allowing itself to be smacked pretty hard without
any loss of function or breakage. It's really impressive to see and all the
more so because it's not wired up to anything but instead is powered by 2 'C'
batteries in the hilt: everything is custom-made by the Canadian-based
Calimacil. Just ignore that wire sticking out of the bottom of the hilt...

As expected, there's a few drawbacks, the first being the cost: at $500.00 for the
top-drawer lightsaber version, they're not cheap. However, it has to be said
that paying that much gets you a plethora of features, including Bluetooth
connectivity, customizable saber color, custom sound effects that react with
motion( including hit / humming / crackle-on-hold ) and upgradability to the
software as time goes on. You can check out their current Kickstarter here - there's a ton pf backers, so chances are you might just get to see one of these in the wild fairly soon, if you're at a convention in the next couple of years.

I
don't belong to any LARP groups, Star Wars costuming clubs or the like, so
while the little kid in me is reaching for my wallet, the adult in me realizes
that this would only be a novelty item that I'd use a few times a year and as
such can't be justified for the price.

I'll
just console myself by watching the planetary walk-throughs for Star Wars:
Battlefront in this link – if you’re a Star Wars fan in any way, you owe it to
yourself to click through the various worlds depicted. The visuals are
incredible and highlight what a wonderful job that EA has done in capturing the
feel of the films in their game: I'd pay good money just to be able to do a VR
walk-around and forget about the combat aspect altogether, the visuals are that immersive.

Who
knows what will be possible in five year’s time? Well... THIS, maybe:

Nov 4 – Decisions

I
made a few major life decisions today, which was quite liberating.

In
part, some of them were coming to honest and final conclusions about what direction
I want my life to take in the next 5 to 10 years. Writing will be a large part
of that, of course, as will sound financial decisions that will put me firmly
on a better path while leaving the past in the past. Despite my efforts and
much devotion of my mental resources, I've come to the inevitable conclusion
that the only person capable of helping me reach my near-term priority goals is…
myself.

It
was immensely freeing and I felt my mind settle immediately today.

Enough
so that much of the apartment clutter and small tasks that had been hanging
around my neck all year long became trivial things once again in my eyes.
Spurred by the fact that I had managed to clear out over a dozen cubic feet of
space in my room, thanks to my recent eBay sales of my Amiga collection, I
spent my entire evening finishing the organization said sales had started.

By the
time I was done, my living space was transformed in a subtle but meaningful
way.

Everything
was in its place, with nothing left in a ‘to do later / whenever’ pile that visually
and mentally impinged on my ability to maintain a daily focus on more important
tasks in my life. It was truly enlightening to realize how keeping such minor
things around me on a daily basis were negatively reminding me that I wasn't
achieving my main goals along with all these smaller tasks that remained
undone.

Now
that I have cleared a workspace in my room, I can retreat to there, to write when
noise or circumstance force me to do so. It's a small but important victory in
stabilizing my priorities, to have order in a part of my life that I've
unconsciously ignored for some time now.

It's
one more step towards fulfilling my dreams, physical order manifested from
mental decisions made today that focus on my own well-being first before
anything, which has been a long time coming.

Nov 5 – Aging Angst?

I
think about a lot of things, all of the time. Some of them short-term, others
long-term; you have to keep the balance between the two. Much like always
looking at your feet were always looking ahead, neither is good to do all the
time: you'll either walk off a cliff for trip over your own feet, neither of
which is good for you.

One
of the things that has always been on the back burner of my mind is getting
older. We've all been there, wondering what the next 20 or 40 or even( hopefully )60 years will bring to us.
What will we do with our time, and who will be there in our lives at those points?

Until
recently, I didn't know if there was anyone out there that I have the
possibility of truly connecting with on all the levels of matter. I'm
unutterably grateful that I've been able to find someone - my girlfriend - who
I am humbled to say is as deep a person in as many ways as I am.

I'm a lucky, lucky guy.

Still,
the question remains: what will the future bring, and who will be in it? The
last part of that sentence is the most important: who. When it comes to family,
friends and coworkers, we get to choose the last two groups but not the first,
who are often the most important, though in my life many of my friends are
family and those connections are extremely precious to me to maintain.

For
most of my life, I wondered about my later years, about being alone( either by choice or circumstance )and
how I would deal with that. As I now know that I am quite comfortable with my
own company, I have come to see my later years as being less dreadful to
contemplate, of a time when I would be beyond productive work of most kinds and
simply seeking to keep my mind active while perhaps still looking to contribute
to the world in some way.

For
the senior show in the video above, their contribution is a simple one: that of
kindness to one another, of knowing that another human being wants them in the
world - and in their lives - on a regular basis.

That's
all you really need to know.

Nov 6 – Discussions

I
spent the entire morning waiting around for UPS to pick up my outgoing Amiga
games lot, being sent to a fellow in Edmonton, AB who hopefully will have much
more time to enjoy it that I have these last three years. I was pleasantly
surprised by how economical the cost was to ship to him, as when I listed the
auction I had under valued the weight of the ship by some 30 pounds – oops. A
lot of empty boxes and diskettes still weight quite a lot and I fretted for a
few days, trying to find a method that wouldn't cost much more than my estimate
had been on the auction page.

Fortunately,
I discovered that UPS had a decent price point that could further be reduced by
signing up as a small business - how convenient! After all was said and done,
the shipment only cost me $25.00 more than my initial estimate, which I was
willing to eat as a lesson to myself to be more thorough in my estimations in
the future. That's very important if I'm going to be doing business with my Glowforge
through the mail with people throughout the province of BC in 2016.

I
also made a few more inquiries today regarding my finances, thanks to my
newfound resolution from this week's decisions about my future. I'm tired of
being burdened by the past, of being the hold into other people’s lack of
interest in my financial goals and I am determined to make my own way in
things, wherever that takes me. I am hopeful that the discussions I had today
will the fruitful, in that I can move forward towards things like car or home
ownership in the future. I've been very careful about protecting my credit
rating despite all that is happened to me over the last decade and that fact
alone I think will stand me in good stead in my decisions to come.

As
for my business, I am hard at work looking at all the aspects of what I need to
do in the next three months before my Glowforge arrives. Website design,
business cards, local connections for parcel pickup and delivery, plus many
other things all have to be hammered out by yours truly. I ready have a
business name registered, along with a website address, local business license,
business accounts with various companies and of course interested beta-testers.

Getting
everything all together in time will be a challenge, one that will likely push
my writing down significantly as a priority, but this business opportunity is
vital to make my dream of future financial independence a reality. Not being
dependent on my day job but instead growing a business that will take me along
the path of my own choosing is immensely appealing to me.

What’s
a little more hard work, anyway?

Nov 7 – Kindness

My
girlfriend's been under the weather all this week.

While
it's the typical seasonal cold that she's caught, nevertheless it's taken a lot
out of her. As it's the weekend and she's still sick, it would normally be
difficult to do much together given her little energy levels and general
snuffles.

So
instead of going out, I just spent the day with her.

When
I was ill this past August, she was kind enough to spend the afternoon making
me chicken soup. It was the best thing I have ever tasted and just having her
there while I was feeling so low was immensely comforting to me. Over the
years, I have tried to be there for my friends whenever they need me, for
whatever reason, helping when I could however I could. With my girlfriend, it
was subtly different, in that she's most important thing in my life now, so the
thought of her spending the day alone and feeling crummy while I did other
things was one I couldn't stand.

We
had breakfast together and spent a good amount of time today just resting while
enjoying some quality downtime together. We did get out for a bit for some
fresh air in the afternoon, but her energy levels were soon flagging, so she
rested for a little while before watching a few episodes of Babylon 5 for a
low-key evening.

I
could see the difference that today made in how she was feeling. Having been
sick myself, I know that people tend to distance themselves from you, in simple
self-preservation to prevent said sickness from happily finding a second host.
I am unfortunately prone to catching colds and the like, but today she needed
me more than I needed to worry about such things.

Being
there for someone else, when they need you, is always the most important thing.

Nov 8 – Government Games

Honesty
and openness in government? We could be seeing the start of a new, positive trend.

The
new Trudeau government was installed in federal office this week, marking a sea
change in how the Canadian government will be run for the next four years… at
least, we all hope it will.

Though
I didn't vote for the Liberals, I am pleased with what I'm seeing come out of
their offices so far. Transparency, accountability and a positive outlook towards
creating a Canada for ALL Canadians are things that have been missing from the
previous administration, sadly.

We made a commitment to invest in growing our economy,
strengthening our middle class, and helping those working hard to join it. We
committed to fighting climate change and protecting our environment. We made a
commitment to provide more direct help to those who need it by giving less to
those who do not. We committed to public investment as the best way to spur
growth, job creation, and economic prosperity. And we committed to a
responsible, transparent fiscal plan for challenging economic times. We expect
you to hold the government accountable for delivering these commitments.

Our country faces many real and immediate challenges – from a
struggling middle class to the threat of climate change. If we are to overcome
these obstacles, Canadians need to have faith in their government’s honesty and
willingness to listen. That is why we committed to set a higher bar for
openness and transparency in Ottawa. Government and its information must be
open by default. Simply put, it is time to shine more light on government to
make sure it remains focused on the people it was created to serve – you.

But in order for you to trust your government, you need a
government that will trust you. When we make a mistake – as all governments do
– it is important that we acknowledge that mistake and learn from it. We know
that you do not expect us to be perfect – but you expect us to work tirelessly,
and to be honest, open, and sincere in our efforts to serve the public
interest.

This
is the sort of government that the rest of the world thinks Canada has, though
it's been far from the actual truth for far too long. I'm optimistic about what
we as a country can accomplish with a progressive and open government in place,
taking us far from the exact opposite of the oppressive reality that has just
been voted out of office.

Here's
hoping.My evening was spent with my lady and two friends playing Super Dungeon Explore, a chibi-style( cute Japanese characters )boardgame where( you guessed it! )we explored a dungeon. With a clever mix of dice, cards and miniatures, it was a fun three hours learning the game and having fun. My character didn't do so well though, as the dice weren't kind to him:

Guess which one is me?

My pet dragon is there on the right, doing better than my character, at this late stage in the game. When all was said and done, none of the characters died - though some came close - and we defeated all the monsters handily while gaining a fair bit of loot and a sense of satisfaction for a Job Well Done.A good way to end the weekend, I'd say!

I don't know what it is about
the fall, but it seems to be the time of year when things change the most for
me. Big decisions, busy times and cloudy weather all combined to make these
months fly by, just as they used to when I was in school. It's an odd feeling
of familiarity and freshness both, one that I don't think I've noticed for far
too many years and is most welcome back in my life again.