Tuesday, May 13, 2014

"Connections"

By Christina Moore

_____

“Ladies, how’s it going?”

Ensigns Felicity Bowman and Fidelma Kyla
turned at the deep voice of Sanctuary’s Tactical Defense Officer, the former
trying vainly to hide a blush.

“Commanders,” Kyla greeted the two men with a
nod, for Lt. Commander Jordan Kelley was accompanied by Lt. Commander Rogan
Enek, his constant companion these days. “It’s going… Well, sir, its going
about as well as it usually does.”

Kelley glanced at the Bajoran man beside him
and rolled his eyes knowingly, then turned back to face the two young women.
“Still haven’t found out why the environmental controls in this section can’t
be adjusted?”

“N-no sir,” Bowman stammered. “It-it’s like
everything else—we think we get it fixed, a-and then it breaks down again.”

The station’s second officer sighed
resignedly. “Well, I guess all I can tell you is to keep trying. We need to get
these systems purged of malfunctions and working properly before the admiral
arrives in another few weeks.”

“Yeah—all we need is for something to go
wrong with a Roylan admiral on scene,” Rogan quipped mildly, referring to
Vice-Admiral Tattok, who was overseeing all Starfleet
operations in the former Cardassian Union. “Talk about silent fury…”

Kelley grinned and with a small wave, he and
Rogan moved on down the corridor.

After a few moments of watching her work
partner and roommate stare longingly after the two men, Kyla nudged Bowman with
her elbow. “Forget it, Felicity.”

Bowman started, turning to the other ensign
with an even deeper blush than the one she’d gotten earlier. “Forget what?” the
young Englishwoman said, switching her sonic screwdriver back on and poking her
hands back into the open panel they were working at.

Kyla raised an eyebrow and looked at her pointedly
as she crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. “I’m a telempath—I pick up
thoughts and emotions, remember? And
while most Deltans and Betazoids make it a practice not to read a person
without their consent, it’s kind of hard not to when your emotions and thoughts
are screaming at me. Besides that, I can sense a definite increase in your
pheromone levels. You’ve got the hots for one of them, and since I have unfortunately heard your thoughts—quite
often, I might add—without meaning to, I know which one you like.”

She reached over and placed a hand on
Bowman’s arm in sympathy. “I get it, trust me—both of them are attractive, but
you’re wasting your time. Chalk it up to a crush and move on.”

Bowman’s fuchsia cheeks deepened to crimson,
even though she was trying to ignore Kyla’s warning. Then suddenly she stopped,
pulled her hands out of the paneling and, after switching her sonic screwdriver
off again, fisted her hands on her hips. “Why should I forget it? Why should I
move on? Jordan’s not dating anyone.”

“Oh, Jordan, is it?” Kyla pushed. “Since when
are you on a first-name basis with Commander Kelley, hmm?”

“Oh, hush up, Fidelma,” Bowman said snarkily.

“Sorry, sister, not gonna work,” the
Deltan-Betazoid said, shaking her head slowly. “Not this time. Look, Commander
Kelley is too old for you anyway. He’s like, almost forty.”

“Thirty-seven. That’s only sixteen years,”
Felicity mumbled, looking down at the deck.

“Sure, but even if he were straight, I doubt
he’d see it that way. He likes you, but he sees himself as a father-figure, not
a potential boyfriend,” Kyla pointed out.

The Human girl looked back up sharply. “What
the bloody hell do you mean, ‘even if he were straight’? Of course he is!”

Ensign Kyla sighed, knowing that the truth
was going to hit her friend hard. But she had to be told or she’d never get
over this unrequited crush of hers. “Sweetie, I’m afraid he’s not. Commander
Kelley isn’t attracted to women. At all.”

Bowman’s eyes began to sting with indignant
tears. “The hell you say. How the devil do you know that? How could you possibly know that?!”

“Honey, haven’t you noticed how much time
he’s been spending with the Trident’s
XO? Believe me, it isn’t just because the guy’s good with weapons.” Kyla sighed
again. “Let me put it to you this way: Because your species is almost entirely
psi-negative, because hardly any Human is adept at controlling their thoughts,
you’re all natural thought broadcasters. You can’t help yourselves. And even
though I can shield myself from the thoughts of non-‘paths, it’s like I said
before—you’re kind of hard to ignore when your thoughts are as loud as a shout.
It happens when you get excited or angry or upset.”

“And I suppose you’re telling me that
Jordan’s thoughts get all shouty whenever he’s around that sodding Bajoran?”

“I wouldn’t necessarily say shouty, but
they’re plenty loud,” Kyla said quietly. “He really likes him, Felicity, and
yet he hasn’t the faintest clue that Rogan likes him, too—same with Rogan, as a
matter of fact. Men are clueless no matter whether they’re attracted to women
or other men.”

“Oh, but that’s just not fair!” Felicity
Bowman wailed softly, tears falling as she fell back against the wall and slid
down it. She wrapped her arms around her knees and began to sob.

Kyla knelt next to her friend and wrapped her
arm around the other girl’s shoulders. “I’m sorry you had to find out this way,
Fabs, but at least now you know. Now you know that he’s not right for you and
you can move on.”

“I don’t want to move on,” Bowman’s muffled
voice told her. “He’s so handsome and so smart, and he’s funny… Why did he have
to like men instead of women? It’s not fair.”

“No, it’s not. Sucks big time when all the
hot guys like each other instead of us girls.”

*****

Rogan Enek glanced behind him as he and
Kelley walked away from the two young ensigns, and he was not remiss to the
longing look the girl with the English accent favored on Jordan. He knew that
look well…

…because he saw it in the mirror every time
he looked into one and Jordan was on his mind.

But Jordan… He was a hard guy to read. Oh,
sure, it was easy to tell when he was annoyed or in a good mood—those emotions
were easy to read on anyone. But the Bajoran had no clue what his Human friend
preferred in the way of personal companionship. Two weeks he’d been here on
Sanctuary already, working side-by-side with the guy, sharing meal breaks with
him, and he hadn’t the faintest clue.

Of course, it wasn’t as if he was being Mr. Open Book himself, either. He’d never been the sort to discuss his feelings
with others, and who you were attracted to was your own business, not anyone
else’s. He was private and reserved by nature, preferring to keep to himself
for the most part, to keep his head down and his nose clean. It was how he’d
survived his childhood in a refugee camp.

Yet here he was, as smitten as that ensign,
with a guy he knew next to nothing about. Rogan was at a loss for how to broach
the subject, until he suddenly heard himself say,

“You know she likes you, don’t you?”

Kelley glanced over. “What do you mean?”

“Come on man, you’d have to be blind not to
see it,” Rogan said as they stepped into a lift. “That little English girl—she
likes you.”

“Oh, that,” Kelley replied, then ordered the
lift to take them to the Promenade. “Felicity’s a sweet girl.”

“Dude, she’s already encouraged,” the Bajoran
countered. “Not that your personal life is any of my business—hell, if you like
her, go for it. But if you’re not into girls who are hardly more than half your
age, you might want to find a way to let her down gently.”

His companion was silent until the lift came
to a stop, at which time he turned and pinned Rogan with a hard stare from his
light green eyes. “You’re right, my personal life is none of your business,” he
said, then turned and began to stalk away.

Kelley stopped and turned back with a sigh
after just a few steps. “I’m sorry, Rogan. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”

He tried to shrug it off, tried not to show
that Kelley’s words had stung. “No, you’re right to be annoyed. I’m butting in
where I’m not wanted. Forget I said anything.”

Rogan moved to step past Kelley, but was
stopped short when the other man took his arm. “No, I was out of line,” the
older man said, quickly letting go of Rogan’s arm when the other looked down at
his hand. “I know you’re just trying to help. And you’re probably right—I
noticed a few weeks ago that she’d taken a liking to me, but I didn’t want to
say anything to her because I didn’t want to encourage her. I’ve actually tried
to avoid doing anything that could be
misconstrued as encouragement.”

Kelley had apologized to him, so Rogan
commanded himself to let the hurt go. “You know how it is with women, man.
Sometimes just being nice to them is all the encouragement they need.”

Jordan chuckled as he turned and started off
again. “Actually, I wouldn’t know. I’ve never really connected with women on
any level other than a platonic one. At least when it comes to women I’m not
related to.”

Rogan schooled his expression as he fell into
step beside him. He fiercely tamped down the surge of emotion he’d felt at
Kelley’s words, for they could have meant something as simple as his having a
hard time sharing his feelings.

“I, uh, I have sort of the same problem,” he
said. “Kinda hard to connect on an emotional level when you find yourself
having to admit that although women are attractive, you’re just not attracted to them.”

There. He’d just opened up perhaps the most
closely guarded part of himself, hoping like hell that even if there wasn’t the
remotest chance Jordan Kelley would reciprocate his feelings, he wasn’t about
to get his ass fried by a man he already considered a friend.

He was surprised when Kelley clapped him on the shoulder. “Now that is a feeling I know all too well.”

2 comments:

We don't have to be in Starfleet to explore. We don't have to go into battle to be brave. Just working up the courage to open up to someone, to avoid the lifelong regret of never having taken the chance with someone. That's why I love these stories as much as the one that meet new life, new civilisations.

Thank you so much! I've long said I'm more of a character writer than anything. I love to create and explore relationships between characters - Rogan Enek was created by another writer, so it was especially challenging, in a way, to create a connection between him and Jordan Kelley.