This comment was posted to reddit on May 11, 2017 at 12:40 am and was deleted within 13 hour(s) and 17 minutes.

How are you with authority and discipline?

I know the value of rules and laws, and we're good when it makes sense. When it doesnt make sense, then i tend to ignore them.

It's never a good idea to go against society head on unless the outcome is a net benefit to you. I prefer to be discrete when it comes to dismissing rules that dont make sense. But it's hard to hide it because we're action oriented people. And sometimes we do act impulsively, but not usually irrationally.

consistently late

That's not rebelling. It's just how i am. I am terrible with being on time. It's been that way since i was little. I have a fond memory of being late to school and my mum with my siblings reversing the car out of the driveway and me chasing after them because i was late and making them late for school. It happened all the tjme. When travelling on my own, i've caught flights 1 minute before the gates closed and i've also missed a flight by 30 seconds. (The later case was because the taxi driver took me the long way around in a city i didnt know, the first time i travelled solo, and we were stuck in 30 minutes of traffic about 1km away from the airport). Anyway all of these makes me a very, very good runner and someone who can stay calm under this kind of pressure.

I guess with anything it's within my control to change if i put in the effort. I changed it once as an experiment by volunteering that lunch/dinner was on me whenever i was late. It worked. But i lost a lot of money :( and then after awhile i didnt see the need to continue being on time after i stopped putting my money on the table. But i know i should change it, some day. It's starting to frustrate me as much as it frustrates other people.

The back talk thing though isnt really me. Lol there was no such thing as back talking to my parents. I dont feel the need to back talk since growing up. It doesnt make sense to irritate other people.

how has this translated into your life

Well i was a quiet and good kid so i didnt have much trouble with the rules. I just did my thing and it happened to be within the rules of acceptable, until one day it wasn't. I just did not understand what i was doing that was 'wrong'. And societies way of handling it by punishing me and enforcing rules was the wrong approach. Firstly, i grew up in an authoritarian dictatorship and i hated it, which makes it rather ineffective on me. Secondly, since ISTPs dont usually utilise support systems, they had no idea what i was going through to understand my behaviour or what they were trying to correct. This was a huge grief period for me. Words cannot describe this adequately enough. So long story short, you either conform to societies expectations or you go your own way. Both of which have consequences.

how have you worked to change your habits

This bit will be rather brief in substance because i've only just drawn my attention to it. I am very stubborn even if i know what i should rationally be doing. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is foolish though. A lot of people say that but dont really understand what it means; As in have the openness and willingness to know and try something different.

There's this book called 'The 7 habits of highly successful people', or other such books. First off, you need new info to learn from and this seems like a good starting point.

Another thing for me is recognising my emotions and actions for what they are and knowing what i should be doing but am not doing because i am being stubborn. And then asking myself what good that does and what's changed, and what will change if i continue on this path, and if i am willing to become a better version of myself. I've literally had to experience and learn it first hand what being stubborn is like. Nothing changes, you're still in a whole world of pain and everything remains the same, so dont do that.

The only thing i can say about this bit so far is you already know what you need to do. Just do it.

There's probably a bit more that goes into that, but i am not sure i can explain it well. For me, i wrote down the list of things i need to pay attention to so that i know what to focus on, otherwise it would just be a momentary thought that goes nowhere. Then i have listed the reasons why these things are a good idea so that i can see the value in it. I know if you want something enough, then it would make sense to just go for it, but somehow i need reasons for some things. It's not very smooth otherwise, because a lot of things are intertwined and dependent on each other. That creates some order for me, so it helps.