November Adventures By Scarlet Rose

Scarlet is taking over the blog to bring you a wonderful insight into her adventurous November…

Last week I found myself going here, there and everywhere to perform, learn and do things entirely unrelated to burlesque. In order to keep myself sane, (and because I’m clearly still experiencing Fringe withdrawal), I wrote up my daily adventures using the same format as when myself and Trixie Blue were in Edinburgh this August. Hopefully they will pass some time for you while you procrastinate with the hot beverage of your choice.

Tuesday 17th November

Shows performed in/Tasks completed

Today I accompanied The Present Lord Rose* to an operation for which he was both anaesthetised and sedated and disappointingly lucid afterwards. I then became unusually nice as I fussed around plumping cushions and making hot water bottles, then breathed a sigh of relief as he went for a nap and I could do my own work. I have a terrible bedside manner.

Best of the banter

As I ventured out to buy soft and mushy supplies I was very ably assisted by a security guard in Tesco Express who proceeded to scan, pack and ask me about my purchases. And then gave relationship advice. He wanted to make sure that TPLR wasn’t just taking and would look after me. And was rather emphatic on this point.

Quote of the day

“And if he ever is too much, you just leave him straight away!” Guess who?

Cocktail catch ups

Well didn’t I have a treat getting on the train up to Newcastle and after knocking a few people with my excessive suitcase (sorry again), pulled into some seats directly in front of one Seamstress Sugar! Normally I’m a grumpy bugger on public transport and don’t want to talk to anyone, but we had a right good natter and I was disappointed she had to get off before me! This is unheard of, I think some sort of award is required.

Coffees consumed

Just the 1, but out of necessity it was a Starbucks, and was possibly more syrup than espresso. Which was possibly for the best.

Wednesday 18th November

Tasks completed

After romanticising the Lit & Phil in Newcastle for the first time I finally braved it for work and dear God it’s beautiful. There was a piano playing as I left. A piano! Now all I need to do is move above it for optimal commuting.

Cocktail catch ups

This was a particularly exciting meet: myself and TPLR ventured outdoors for one purpose and one purpose only… Kitten evaluation! Where we met beautiful little Lyra. I’m a bit in love. If only she was actually going to be my cat.

Coffees consumed

One again! This isn’t nearly as detrimental as I feared.

Thursday 19th November

Shows performed in/tasks completed

Today was The Spare Rib day! And not only that, it was their first birthday too! Off I headed to Liverpool, having to power through the mild awkwardness I felt doing my make-up on a table seat surrounded by people (and resist the urge to yell, “Haven’t you HEARD of stage make-up?!”).

When I eventually conquered delayed trains and wrong turns, I had a right good catch-up with all the lovely performers, performed to a fabulous audience who really ticked all the boxes and finished the night listening to the music of the excellent Chasing Infinity, do check them out.

Best of the banter

Trying to figure out the etymology of the phrase ‘booby traps’ with little success and discovering that Crystal Nightshade is the burlesque artist to go to for consumer rights advice. And that she is very nice about me constantly asking her, “but what other tips do you have? Are there any really unusual things you’ve been asked?!”

Qotd

“There’s probably a dead rat in there”- Minxie Coquette

Cocktail catch ups

So many gorgeous individuals, it was lovely getting to see Minxie Coquette and Tilly Mint again, Crystal Nightshade was the most informative fun (#theoryhunters) and I also got to meet the delightful Poppy Liqueur, the enigmatic M and the musically talented (I’m desperately envious) members of Chasing Infinity.

Coffees consumed

2- Ok, a minor increase. Though I was still tired by 11:30pm, which doesn’t bode well for Saturday.

Friday 20th November

Shows performed in/tasks completed

Sadly, today’s task was leaving Liverpool on the first train back to uni for a class at 10. Of course I’d had a cup of tea and a chat with Tilly Mint and M when we got back to Tilly’s so I’d had, in total 2 and a half hours sleep before my alarm went off. And no-where near enough caffeine. The fact I did all this for the class to start 50 minutes late and last 25 minutes is neither here nor there (that’s a heinous lie, I could have been sleeping!!) Ah well, I thought, now I have to whole afternoon to work. Nope! Upon returning to Newcastle I promptly fell asleep only to wake-up in my usual weird What World Event Have I Missed state, discovered no Domino’s delivered near me (you thought I was mad about the lecture!) and huffily treated myself to a bath and a milkshake. Safe to say, the most sedate, but nonetheless drowsy day of this run.

The drowsy view from TPLR’s flat.

Cocktail catch-ups

Myself- probably the only person that would put up with me at the minute haha!

Coffees consumed

A paltry 1- no-where near enough!

21st November 2015

Shows performed in/tasks completed

Well today I was gleefully reunited with Trixie Blue and boy did we have a mammoth task ahead of us! Drive to Glasgow from Newcastle, participate in 3 workshops delivered by Beau Rocks, Gypsy Charms & Missy Malone, watch the fabulous Saturday Night Showcase and then Trixie performed in the Rock’n’Roll Rendezvous! And then we needed to make our way home! Awake for a total of 23 hours straight. And it was bloody marvellous!

Best of the banter

There were many glorious moments that I can’t quite describe, but while we were looking for some cheap sweets to keep us going for the evening, Trixie suddenly exclaimed, “ooh, runts!” Because that word just amuses me anyway and what it sounds like shocked me, I ended up crouched over a bucket of “Santa’s beards” laughing so hard I had to try not to be sick on it. Classy until the bitter end.

Qotd

“Ooh, runts!”

Cocktail catch ups

Well got to catch up with a bevy of fabulous performers including Tom Harlow, Kim Khaos, Ana Kiss, Tootsie Annie, Roxy Stardust and many others that we were either catching up with or just meeting. It was delightful all round.

The fabulous Kim Khaos & Tom Harlow

Coffees consumed

Today was a coffee at any opportunity sort of a day. 3 coffees plus a hideous sweet I use to eat called a Brainlicker. Does anyone else remember them? They’re like liquid acidic sugar that you suck from a rollerball (many a joke was made). I’m pretty sure my heart hates me now.

Sunday 22nd November

Shows performed in/tasks completed

The most energetic thing I completed today was buying some new boots. And they are boot-iful. (Sorry, puns are all I can manage today).

Best of the banter

Yelling at novelty chocolate martini glasses in Fenwick’s. Seriously, what is the point?!

Cocktail catch ups

The parents Rose, who did buy my tapas for lunch. Good parents.

Coffees consumed

None! A relapse clearly.

Monday 23rd November

Shows performed in/tasks completed

Attended my first 4 hour long lecture today which of course started at 9:00am! Much as I love my marketing, I was flagging 2/3 in. Which was when a very interesting DVD about the diamond industry was played! Fun fact for the day, the expression ‘diamonds are forever’ was created by marketers in 1947! If you ever see me out and about, feel free to chat to me about it as it’s bloody interesting! After my lecture, I took my frazzled brain to see my oldest friend, her new baby and her lovely fluffy cat Kerry! Look how fluffy!

Qotd

After I revealed a second packet of white chocolate fingers for us to work through Vez took one look at me and said:

“You are the obesity crisis”

Cocktail catch ups

The friend, the baby and of course, the cat. But you’ve heard about them already!

Coffees consumed

Just one from a campus machine. Back on it slow and steady. I don’t know what I expected for 65p, but it certainly missed my expectations.

Well, that’s the end of my week of adventures, and a bit like the Fringe, now that’s finished I’m desperate to do it all again! Let the cycle begin…

*Rather pleasingly this reference managed to evade recognition and is in fact how Sir Terry Wogan refers to his wife of over 50 years (The Present Lady Wogan). It’s always amused me.