Tuesday, May 23, 2006

The best rock crit rubbernecking opportunities recently have been Q&As with Ghostface Killah, who has decided to become the worst interview subject ever. There's a certain schadenfreud-style thrill that I get in seeing another journalist having their weakest interview questions backhanded into their faces by a guy who wears a robe in public on the regular. Also nice is Ghostface getting a little meta on the interview process:Lately you and many other East Coast artists have been criticizing Southern hip-hop, in particular songs such as “Laffy Taffy.”Ghostface Killah: Man, that’s all y’all be talking about lately.

Is he commenting on the media's overexamination of artists' gestures, or critiquing the laziness of the pop culture press? Or is he just mad?"Right now, I say fuck New York. Yeah, I’m from New York, but fuck New York. Because niggas is pussy. They is so quick to jump on the next man’s dick and can’t even deal with what they got in front of they face."One day I will learn how to hate as hard as Ghostface Killah, and I will become totally powerful. On that day I will buy a robe and a cranberry Snapple and get to hating full-time. It will be the best day of my life.

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Hopper: 1800 people come to my blog suddenly now thinking I think they are racists because they are into pavement, not cam'ron.Me: hahahaHopper: whatever, they are.Hopper: Maybe I should go on a crazy tear and say that "crooked rain crooked rain" is a symbol of the holocaust?Me: stephen malkmus explicitly endorses the tuskegee syphilis experimentsHopper: I AM GOING TO PEE I AM LAUGHING SO HARDHopper: Gary, the first drummer actually quit once he found out that Malkamus takes shit on known indian grave yards.Hopper: yelling "fuck you injuns" and stuff.Me: malkmus will have sex with jewish chicks, but only in the buttHopper: I think you should cut and paste it and make a blog post of it.Hopper: of this, not Steve Malkamus' HASID HATER ANALJAM VOL 3

Friday, May 05, 2006

"We are not supposed to rub food over our naked bodies."Thank you, art. I was confused on this point."Marshmallow Fluff helps create the union between the natural and the inert by its dense, gelatinous consistency metamorphisizing and overwhelming the human and object into one."Wait, you're just making this up.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Propers to our boy Kanye for taking the hipster neckerchief to its furthest, flossiest end, Louis Vuitton-style:I wanna seem him get on some nouveau hippie shit next, with like a Jakob dreamcatcher pendant. That would be fly.