Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

Many of these fine traits actually describe my family...And I suspect some of the participants of this great experiment in journalism we know as the Dave Barry Blog.

Fight constantly -- and play a deadly game of chicken called "claw lock"?
Flirt with each other -- by urinating in each other's faces?
Dance during courtship -- and make love in the missionary position?

Q: What's the best way to kill a lobster?
A: Before putting lobsters in the pot, I kill them quickly so they won't suffer in the boiling water. I use a technique taught to me by a professional chef. It may seem a bit gruesome but it's effective and more humane than boiling them alive. Place the lobster upside down on a cutting board, and position the tip of the largest, heaviest kitchen knife you can find between the legs, about halfway down the body, edge of knife facing the animal's head. In two swift motions, first plunge the knife into the body and then pivot the knife edge down sharply to split the animal's head in half. The lobster's nervous system has no brain but rather a string of connected ganglia. The ganglia that control the rear legs and tail won't necessarily be completely severed by this process, and there may still be some reflexive movement, but the animal is no longer alive.

What the f#*k? After read this if I was a lobster, I want to be boiled. Thanks.