Just as I was beginning to think I was
alone in the universe, a single dad who takes care of
his child 24 hours a day, seven days a week, I find out
I'm not.

Statistics Canada's newest census report
states, "between 2001 and 2006, lone-father families
rose 14.6 per cent, more than twice the pace of 6.3 per
cent for lone-mother families." This is good news.

I say "good news" not out of any
disrespect to single moms, but rather as an affirmation
of Canadian family democracy in action. According to the
same report, sole custody of the kids was given to the
mom less than half the time (47.7 per cent).

Want some perspective? In 1980, the mom
received sole custody 78.2 per cent of the time.

Let's consider the big picture: Canadian
families, children and democracy.

It's impossible for a solid dad to hear
the term "sole custody" and not get freaked out
emotionally – not a great way to set the stage for a
lifetime of dialogue and co-parenting with your ex.

If the child is doing well, looks
forward to spending time with dad, talks about him with
enthusiasm and laughter, it's not important that he
broke up with you, was a jerk about it or even that he
cheated on you or took up with a younger woman. What is
important is how the child benefits from his
contribution.

Why have single dads so embraced this
new spirit of parenting? Society has changed because it
needed to change.

With single moms taking their rightful
place in the workforce and handing off parenting duties
to men, it didn't take long us to realize that, "Hey, I
love this fathering thing."

If the old "man badge" was the 60-hour
work week, the new one is defined by the hours spent
showing we love our children by doing things with them.

All men have a feminine side and being
single dads allows us the best outlet for it. It makes
us feel whole and offers us a new and evolved way to
express ourselves emotionally.

These new feelings seem so right to us,
because they are right, and so we are propelled to want
to take up the greatest role possible in the
single-parent household.

Cynics will say that men battle for
access so they won't have to make monthly support
payments, but I can't believe that's what's driving the
numbers associated with increased "dad participation" in
the single-family household.

Instead I believe that what's happening
is a manifestation of all that is good and natural –
fathers need to be involved big time.

Don't believe me? Ask or watch your
child. They are the walking truth.