Detective Rose Cheever, meanwhile, thinks part of the problem is getting parents to understand what their kids — only some of their kids, to be sure — are actually doing.

“Kids start off with beer,” she says. “But what is happening now is that an e-mail invitation to a party is being forwarded all over town. Far more kids show up than were actually invited and some of them bring alcohol with them, even if that’s not what was intended.”

And a Swampscott mother who asked not to be identified in print, says she knows as well from painful personal experience.

“How do I know? I’ve seen the statistics of the number of young people who are being taken to the emergency room at Salem Hospital because of alcohol poisoning,” she says. “I grew up here and I think part of the problem is that alcohol has always been a part of life, adult life, here. It becomes part of kids’ lives too.”

But there is a difference, this mom says.

“Kids are drinking not to fit in but to get drunk,” she says. “And it’s not beer they’re drinking. It’s hard liquor — because it tastes good too.”

She says she has been talking privately with lots of local parents, trying to alert them that those who drink aren’t the “bad kids.”

“It’s also the good kids, the intelligent kids who do well in school, who are also drinking to get drunk on the weekend,” she says. “And too often their parents keep thinking, well, it’s not MY kid. But it is your kid.”

This mother thinks she knows where young people learn to drink: from those very same parents.

“Sure,” she says. “Alcohol is part of every adult party, every adult function. That’s where young people learn how to act like adults — they watch.”

Too often, the police officers say, parents finally get a wake-up call. From the police.

“There are things parents can do, even if they’re not home and their child decides to host a party,” Cheever says before addressing the question of when parents should call 911.

“If your kid is attending a party, call the parents where the party will be held and ask what they plan to do if some young people bring alcohol,” she says. “And if the party is at your house, make sure you know who is being invited and how many.”

If parents are away for the evening or weekend, well, Cheever says, there’s help a phone call away.

“Just in case, call the Police Department and ask us to drive by every so often and check. Make sure you set rules in advance and — this may sound strange — make sure you have plenty of non-alcoholic things to drink and plenty to eat so kids won’t have to bring anything of their own.”

The absent parents should also tell neighbors there’s going to be a party and, if necessary, they should call the police if they think something is amiss. Though it’s pretty rare, parents can be held responsible for what happens in their home even when they’re not there, Cheever observes. It’s not unlike the responsibility that liquor stores and bars bear when they sell alcohol to an intoxicated person, she explains.

The statute, for those who wonder, is in Massachusetts General Laws, Chapter 272, Section 53.

“Another example would be allowing your child to drive your car without a license. You can be charged with a crime,” she adds.

If parents are home, they don’t have to be intrusive but they should peek into the room or rooms where the party is going on, Cheever says.

And if they see …

What if parents peek in and see that Budweiser or Jack Daniels have crashed the party after all? What do they do?

Parents can be confused about what to do next, both police officers agree.

“The first thing to do is to call the parents of the kids who are drinking,” Cassidy says. “If your child was drinking at a party, wouldn’t you want to know? A lot of parents would be outraged later if their child is drinking and the other parents DIDN’T tell them. And they should be.”

And they really should call the police as well, right away, Cassidy says. Sometimes, he says, parents stop kids from drinking for a bit and then let them drive themselves home.

Bad idea, he emphasizes. Not only does it endanger the drinker but everyone else on the road. Call the police. Right away.

“I remember last summer when a person saw kids drinking on Phillips Beach one night but they waited a couple of days before calling us,” Cheever says. “That doesn’t help anyone.”

“Believe me, we know what’s going on out there, but for too long people thought we didn’t or wouldn’t do anything. Not so,” Cassidy says. “I’m glad you’re writing about this and people are talking about it because it’s about time. The police and the schools do know. Finally, it seems, people are starting to listen to us.”

Not all, however, he admits.

“We’ve had kids go to court for underage drinking and the very next day — the very next day — I see them driving around town, driving with one hand on the wheel and the other on a cell phone. What are their parents thinking?” Cassidy asks.

And for teenagers, Cheever offers another caution, even beyond fines and the danger to themselves and others.

“I’ve seen kids get hooked on alcohol or other drugs and then seen the snowball effect,” Cheever says. “They lose their sports and then their college scholarships.”

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