A couple weeks ago, I convinced my guy to partake in a sex challenge: We would do the deed every day for a week. There was no real agenda here—it was just to see if we could and what the effect, if any, getting busy daily would have on our relationship.

We made it two nights. Night three, we were both like, eh, do we really have to?

Now, not to brag, but my guy and I have pretty amazing sex. Like, simultaneous-orgasms -on-the-reg, sex. (I've been around the block enough times to realize that this is pretty rare.) So, I know that not wanting to do it for a week straight didn't have anything to do with the quality of our sex life. We just, simply, weren't that into it.

In fact, at the risk of totally oversharing, we usually only get busy two-to-three times a week, which might seem weird given how much we enjoy having sex with each other. But, look, we've been together for nearly four years, we're old (me, 29, he 31), we work a lot, and by the time we get into bed at night we sometimes would rather just snuggle up with our respective Kindles.

In any case, we're both happy with our sex life and our relationship. However, today, I read about a new book claiming that the "happiest couples" have sex three-to-four times a week.

I find proclamations like these problematic—perhaps because, in this case, my guy and I don't quite hit that optimal sex frequency. But what I learned from my failed seven-day sexperiment is that forcing sex, whether through a challenge like the one I posed or some sort of quota, kinda defeats the whole purpose. Sex should fun, relaxing, enjoyable, pleasurable: It's not something you should feel like you have to do for any reason. As long as you're happy with it, your sex frequency is totally normal.

So, while I love relationship-related research as much as the next gal, I think I'm going to stick with what's working for me and my guy. Because I'm pretty sure that the truly happiest couples are the ones who are satisfied and comfortable with their sex lives—whether they meet some arbitrary quota or not.