Fey's Curse

Twenty-One

Probably what shocked me the most was
that Goodfellow stayed with me the whole time I healed in the pool. At first
the water surrounding me was red with blood, but the longer I swam, the clearer
the surface became. I refused to think about what a strange rollercoaster the
entire day had been. Or, rather, most of my life. Ignoring the tiger that curled up on the bank helped ease
some of the ache inside me.

I
needed to get my act together. Invading Tir Na Nog was the last straw in Ash’s,
Sage’s, and Rowan’s eyes. Ren and Kishan had been ready to go to war since I
returned alone from my other more recent visit to the chutes; anything to help me
free Puck. And then there was the slight fact that I wanted to get this over
with before foolish Titania could betray us again.

For
a final life-or-death battle, I couldn’t be a stupidly moody, brooding teenage girl like I had
been for over half a week.

Still,
I dragged myself from the pool with a heavy heart. On the bank, I sat with my
back to the beast with Puck’s face. No matter who I used to be, I was still
young now, and crazy situations like this just weren’t normal. I figured I had
every right to brood for a while longer.

Heat
brushed my skin as Puck shifted. He wrung his shirt in his hands, all traces of
the injuries I saw earlier gone. I always knew him to be active, yet I had
never seen restlessness like this. “Can you please talk to me, Starr?” he asked
softly.

Thinking
over fighting strategies in my head, I drew my legs to my chest. I hadn't done that in a while, either, considering how much of a habit it had once been. “There’s
nothing to talk about,” I grumbled, not looking at him. I refused.

A
smirk hinted at his voice. Something stabbed my heart. “There’s a universe full
of things to talk about.” His finger ghosted down my spine. I arched against
his touch. “I wanted to ask you about my change, actually.”

“What
about it?” I demanded, stiffening even more.

Goodfellow
gently turned me to face him. I silently cursed myself for not having glamour
to protect me from the wildness I saw in the emerald depths. Even he could be an enemy, with his current lack of memories. “I
can see the hope in your face every time you look at me. You don’t bother
hiding your feelings; I think because a part of you hopes the old me will be
back in the next moment. But you have to know that’s unlikely. Every damn time,
I watch your hope vanish into nothingness, shutting me out.” I stared at him
balefully. “I wanted to know what you miss so badly that you’re willing to turn
against me.” Sorrow darkened the familiar jewel-green irises.

“I’m
not––” I trailed off. That was exactly what I had begun doing. “Do you remember
the curse at all, Puck?” He shook his head. I forgot how to breathe for a
minute. “You saved our best friend’s life once, and in turn, you received the
curse that was meant for him. I’ve broken a couple parts of it already, on Ren
and Kishan. You’re the one suffering the backlash, ’cause you’re the one who
was tied a little too deeply into it.”

The
beast leaned backward onto his hands. “I knew I wasn’t like this before,” he
muttered under his breath.

Why
did this have to be my job? Oh, right. “You and I were really close. I’m sorry if you feel
like I’m casting you out, but it’s hard to see you look so normal and know
th-that I couldn’t save you.” My greatest fear, my deepest regret.

“Oh.”

His
hand slid over the arm guard that hadn’t come off yet, despite my hours in the
cascades’ water. My skin prickled under the ice. “Why did you save me, anyway, Goodfellow? Last impression I got of you, you wanted nothing to do with me.”

“I
ran from you a few days ago because of the different vibes I got every second I
was near you. I was terrified of hurting you.” He lifted his gaze from the arm
guard to meet my eyes. “I heard you when they grabbed you from Ash. I don’t
remember much of what I was before, but I swear I’ve never run that fast in my
entire life. All that made sense to me was that I couldn’t let them touch you,
even if I ended up being the one to hurt you someday.” Before I could say
anything, he swept forward and kissed me.

Longing
and grief warred inside me. I didn’t have the strength to move us either way,
but when I leaned back, he came down with me. Neither one of us was the same.

Digging
my fingers into his shoulder blades, I stopped him from jumping up as soon as
he pulled away. “Either you and I figure out where the hell to go from here, or
you leave and never come back. Not even when you know I’m in trouble.” I traced
the line of his cheekbone with my thumb. “I’m as good as human. My pain
tolerance isn’t like yours and the other fey’s. Humans can die of a broken
heart, and I don’t have the kind of time you do to move on and forget.”

“You’re
not someone I can forget, love.” He pecked the tip of my nose. “But while we’re
making conditions, either you try to see beyond the fact the trickster you know
is gone, or I’ll stay out of your way for the rest of whatever life you have
left.”

I can’t give you up! my mind shrieked.
Puck’s eyes flashed in a way that reminded me of how he dealt with my amnesia,
which seemed like forever ago by now.

Dropping
my hand from his face, I wrapped both arms around his neck. “You’ll heal in
time,” I reassured him. Hypocritical in and of itself, considering I didn’t
believe I was going to get any better. Ever. “I have every intention on seeing this
curse broken, even if it breaks me to free you.” I nudged him sideways, and he
rolled off me easily. Looked like I was going to get my heart shattered a second time.

“So,”
he began, snapping back into general mode. “What’s the next invasion plan?”

Just
like that, the two of us fell into an easygoing military partnership. For only
a second in the grand scheme of things, I forgot about my drained existence,
about the curse that kept Puck locked up. Battle strategy was somewhat relaxing
for me, when talking only in theory. And the beast didn’t have the same
hang-ups about discussing it with me as Puck had.

We
had another invasion planned in a matter of minutes, along with multiple backup
plans. I returned to the manor with him this time.

Only
to find the land deadly quiet. From our safety under the tree line, I could
tell the house was ravaged.

Puck
went still beside me. “Who would do such a thing?” he growled. Two forces
flickered equally in his green eyes, neither gaining ground on the other. “She did
her best not to make enemies with those who knew… and we never showed anyone…”
His fists clenched at his sides.

“The
others aren’t here,” I commented, trying to snap him out of a darkness I did
not like. “Maybe they don’t know about this yet.”

With
a shaking hand, he pointed at tracks not far off from us. “They knew. They
escaped, thankfully.” I couldn’t help the gratitude that roared through me when
I saw the clarity in his emerald gaze. Even the slightest bit, my trickster had returned. “Come on,
little warrior. We should get out of here while we have the chance.”

“Fine
by me, except where do you expect us to go? I don’t have anything to help
protect us, we’re short on any bargaining chips, and we have no idea where the
others sought refuge. Or if maybe we should wait before joining them.”

“Just
follow me, then,” he growled, not wholly himself yet. His fingers entwined with
my own. “We’re going someplace safe before we figure out what else to do.”

As
we headed in the direction of one of the borders, I glanced over my shoulder at
the destroyed manor. It had been the source of so many memories for Ash and
Puck both, my safe house, Kelsey’s and Meghan’s training grounds. Hatred
sparked a fire inside me. It was a dull spark, not the inferno I was used to,
but it was still something. Unsure of where we were going, I kept pace with
Puck. If he could recover in the blink of an eye, hopefully I did, too.

Preferably
not under the same circumstances, though.

Walking
alongside him, I realized how much of a lie that was. He was my trickster,
sure, but he was also the Seelie jester whose pranks had turned deadly –– who
had relished in the pain they brought. Even stuck in his own head, I’d never
been afraid of the mindless beast. Now I wasn’t sure if I was afraid for him,
or of him.

“Goodfellow,”
I murmured as soon as I recognized some of the forest. His eyes shot sideways
at me for the briefest moment. I felt starved of something important. I raised
my voice. “Puck, Arcadia isn’t safe for me.”

That
semi-familiar growl rumbled deep in his chest again. “It is when you stay close
to me,” he snapped.

Cringing
at the harshness of his tone, I wondered, And
if your former king has decided to no longer absolve you for everything? The
lady of the Summer Court suddenly likes you, right? Everyone knew she hated
me… and all of my inner guard.

Not
to mention that other than passing forces to help us fight against our
opponents, the last time I saw Summer fey was when Ash and I ran from the
bounties we suddenly found on our heads. Puck’s hand slid from mine, and I did my best not to
seem as vulnerable as I felt.

Voices
shuddered through the Hedge, but Puck led the way through with perfect confidence. I
recognized what general direction we were going, although I wouldn’t be able to
find my way alone anytime soon. Eventually, we came out to the wooden door I’d
rushed from last time. It looked as undisturbed as the first moment I saw it.

Ignoring
the sounds that seemed to have followed us through the corridors, Puck slipped through the back door into his room. I breathed a sigh of relief when I closed it behind us.
“You don’t have anything to be scared about,” he muttered, searching through
his drawers.

“Don’t
I?” I retorted, frustrated that his compassion was nowhere to be found. And that I'd been in this position once, a sidhe searching through drawers and all, with Ash. “Last
time I was here, I nearly died.”

The
look he gave me was full of disbelief. “The way I heard it, you drained
yourself –– again –– and still got out before They caught up to you. That’s not almost
dying, not unless you faced Them in battle.” He slammed one drawer shut. A
triple braid, made from nine different colored cords, hung from his hand. “I
don’t have a lot of time left, little warrior, and I need to see Oberon before
the day’s out.” His expression asked for permission he might not listen to
anyway.

“First,
don’t say it if you’re only trying to change my mind about something.” The
nickname was the last thing that held any memory of what we once were. “Second,
you’re going to end up visiting Oberon whether or not I know about it. I’d
prefer you didn’t do it behind my back, but at this point I don’t think you
care about my opinion.”

“Third?”

Keeping
my mouth shut, I stared at nothing in particular to the right of him, forcing
myself to be distant. The braid had to have come from the owner of the mansion.
While I hadn’t been all that jealous before, I now envied her for her
connection to Puck. Bond or not, we had split from each other. He would do
whatever, regardless of leaving me alone in a place where people wanted me dead
just as much as they wanted to help me.

The
trickster sighed and closed the distance between us. “I will never stop caring
about your opinion, little warrior.”

“Better,”
I sighed, my instincts betraying me. So much for staying mad.

His
perpetual smirk played at his lips. A chaste kiss, and then he had moved to the
door. “Stay in here while I’m in Court, okay? Not many people can find their
way through my part of the Hedge, so this is the safest place for you.” He
winked before ducking out.

I
would have stayed there even without his warning. There was enough hatred left
on his face that I knew the attack on the manor had damaged him more than he
cared to admit. Although covered in the lights of summer, the Seelie faeries
were equally cutthroat to their Winter counterparts. And technically, I was a
human in their midst, magic or no.

Music
drifted to my ears through the gaps in the briars. I looked toward the
densely-packed thorn walls, straining to hear. A lilting melody wrapped around
me, and I shook my head to clear the fuzziness. Before I could stop myself, my
hand rested on the door handle, ready to open this temporary sanctuary to the
harp’s siren song. I fought the urge to turn the knob and lost.

“Starr?”
I was vaguely aware of Tansy’s voice cutting into the sweet chords that washed
over me.

A
small yet powerful body knocked into me, snapping me out of the music-induced
daze. “What the hell?” I demanded. The song continued as if it hadn’t been
intended to entrance me. Hazel hair and matching eyes gleamed up at me in
challenge. My feet turned toward the source of the music. “Go away, servant,” I
growled, the strongest I’d sounded since I was drained of my magic. As Puck pointed out, again.

The
satire pushed me back once more. “No. Starr, if you go to them, they’ll win.”
She had orders, I realized. Puck wanted an extra layer to make sure I remained
where I was.

“Let
them win, then,” I replied, forcing my way past. Strength that could not have
been my own shoved her away from me, and I continued to follow a trail I had
never been on before. The Hedge parted to let me through, curling and blooming
almost in time with the music. I dove headlong into that trance yet again.

Only
a small part of me realized how unlikely it was that I would have otherwise responded to
faery music. As beautiful as it was, some of my training consisted of maintaining
control of my own will; faery music was like a drug, taking that away.

“Wine?”
a humanoid fey with a golden aura offered. I shook my head. Rules in the faery
realms stressed not accepting any food or drink from them. Her pointed ears
seemed to prick, listening for sounds I couldn’t hear beyond the music within
this clearing. How long had I walked for, to get here? “Come now, child.
There’s nothing wrong with the wine.” Her voice was a melody in itself. I lost
the fight for my control once more, focusing solely on her unearthly eyes. “Trust me, pet, it will wipe your stress
from this world.”

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