Pity for the Shameless One

torn between
just wanting a hug
and wishing everything
could just go back
to the way it was
I know it can’t / won’t
the cat is out
and all the ships are sinking
be my life raft
I’m terrible
at swimming / navigating
in these
unfamiliar waters
life is unfair, and I’m
the unfairest of them all
since I’m the one
who rowed us out here
and pulled the plug