I've said it before and I'll say it again, as cool as the Fake Chuck Norris that the internet invented is, the guy whose tears could cure cancer if only he'd cry, the real Chuck Norris is that much of a slimy dicklicker.

I've said it
Here's the transcript:
"As my wife Jean and I watched the GOP debate and went to the website, we were trying to decide which of the candidates would be best to do head-to-head combat with President Obama," says Norris in the call.

The gap between actual Chuck Norris and the fake Chuck Norris of the internet has always been a pretty wide one, and almost every news story about him is the equivalent of seeing a honey badger in real life and it turns out to be a koala wearing panties.