You’re probably asking yourself, “What the hell is a Neosporin tote?” Apparently (and we wouldn’t know this because we buy generic Neosporin from Walgreens), Neosporin now comes with a small plastic totebag that you can use to remind yourself that you should take the ointment with you in case you carelessly plunge a knife into your tender fleshy parts while you are away from home.

In the wake of the Carmex controversy, we thought we’d offer some helpful lip-healing solutions. No, this isn’t a health blog, but it is about saving money and if we can get you off the chapstick and on the way to healthy lips—well, we’ve done our job. That being said, this may not work for you, and we’re not claiming to have any sort of special knowledge, you know, like doctors have. In fact, this is very probably quackery, and you shouldn’t even try it. Even though it works every single time for us.