I've got a 5-year-old and a 1-year-old. I've actually been impressed at how well 5yo DS plays with 1yo DD. However, she does all the toddler stuff, like crashing over his toys, trying to eat them, etc. Everyone says "he'll just have to play in his room," but he has always been right by me, which is, of course, where she wants to be too! (Not to mention the way I want it too!) Anyone have advice about how to help them play together?

I don't see why he'd have to play in his room. We actually prefer to keep toys out of the kids' rooms. Makes it easier to get 2 or 3 beds and the needed dressers in there. So all the toys are in a playroom. You just take the time to teach the older one that a young one isn't trying to be mean when they knock things down. Perhaps have a special place to put the toys that would be dangerous for a baby. The legos are kept in the bigger boys' room here just for that reason. But mostly we just encourage the older kids to play with the little ones and remind them that they aren't trying to mean by knocking something over. It's just babyzilla time and now you have to build a better train track, building, whatever. Most of the time we don't have a major issue but I realize each family is going to have to decide what works best for them so perhaps a different strategy will work for your kids.

My kids are 5 years old DD and a 7m old DS.. she is a GREAT help with him, but as far as playing together.. she will play peek a boo and things like that but with Gage starting to crawl.. he's invading her space lol.. she is a child who enjoys playing by herself. in her room. so i guess im not too much help when it comes to them playing together..

but my brother and sister were 4 years apart as well and my mom said ( as advice to me with my two ) that things where they get " free roam" are great things to do .. like the park, painting. things that dont really have rules or age limits.. HTH.. but i'll be in your same boat her in the next couple months lol

Cool! That's what I was hoping--I am working with my 5yo in the hopes that having a toddler around will just broaden his horizons--you know, teaching him to deal with "difficult people." "Babyzilla" is right! A lot of the time he does have a good attitude about it. I'd hope that having a sibling helps teach some important lessons like this, but I wasn't sure how well a 5you would get it. He does really freak out when she wails--car rides can be difficult...

Elizabeth...get him some ear protectors!! (you know those ear muff ones?) I got those for my 4 yo ds when i had dd in the summer b/c ds has very sensitive ears and he too hated listening to her scream in the car.

Hey, ear protectors! Can you get those at the electronic-stuff stores? Like best buy and such? I think that would help the car issue.

I actually had a woman in the grocery store ask how far apart they were and then tell me that her two were spaced exactly 2.5 years apart because that's what Dr. Spock reccommended. She seemed disapproving of the spacing of my kids! I decided not to tell her the graphic miscarriage story!

2 of my girls are 4 yrs apart. They are now 8 and 4 and they play very well together. barbies and babies and dancing and dress up... When dd3 was a baby they practically smothered her, then she bothered them, but now they all play together!