Thursday, December 13, 2012

MURFREESBORO--For
generations, people have been told that discussing sex is taboo — that nice
people, especially women, don’t talk about it, even with their husbands.

In the 21st century, open, frank discussion about sex
increasingly is seen as necessary for the establishment and maintenance of
healthy adult relationships.

That’s why Dr. Jessica Kratzer, assistant professor in the
MTSU Department of Speech and Theatre, calls the new “Sex and Communication”
class her “dream course.”

Kratzer designed the first half of her course to track
sexual communication through the life course, beginning with parent-child relationships
and progressing through dating relationships, married and long-term couples and
sex among the elderly.

Her students watched “Still Doing It,” a documentary in
which nine senior citizens talk openly and frankly about their sex lives.

“They had these mixed emotions, like, you know, ‘I can’t
believe people in their 80s still have sex,’” Kratzer said of her students’
reactions. “But, at the same time, if that was them they hope that they’re
still able to do that when they get older.”

One of the students’ assignments was to interview two people
about their sexual experiences, willing subjects who the students most likely
would have known before signing up for the class. Kratzer says pseudonyms are
used for the participants in the papers.

“I think a lot of people feel embarrassed about their sexual
pasts or unsure about how their partners will feel about their sexual pasts,
even if they feel OK with it,” Kratzer said.

Other people just don’t want to risk hurting their partners’
feelings, the professor added.

But one theory about communications breakdowns Kratzer won’t
accept is the “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” mentality.

“That book I find to be ridiculous and based on complete
stereotypes,” Kratzer said of the best-seller by relationship counselor John
Gray.

Kratzer says nothing about relationships between men and
women or the differences between masculinity and femininity is that simplistic.

“One isn’t better than the other,” she said. “It’s nice when
they can complement each other and work well off each other.”

Discussions about sexual communication take on new
dimensions when talking about the new technology. Kratzer said, for example,
there’s not that much research on “sexting” available because it’s relatively
new.But she said people tend to have
more courage in talking about sex when they can hide behind technology.

“It’s so much easier to say things via a text message or an
e-mail because you don’t have to face that person,” Kratzer observed. “You
don’t have to look them in their eyes.”

She also has reservations about posting one’s entire sexual
history on Facebook. However, she doesn’t necessarily find speed dating to be
problematic.

“I don’t see anything wrong with it as long as people are
going in with the mindset that they may not find their perfect match,” Kratzer
said.

By exploring various perspectives in class, Kratzer hopes
her students will find that there’s more to sex than just sex.

“I’m hoping that my students really understand the broad
spectrum of communication and sex and, when we talk about sex, it doesn’t have
to be the act itself,” she said.

The Sex and Communications course (COMM 4800) is a special
topics class that debuted in fall 2012 and can be offered again periodically at
the discretion of the department.

To hear an interview with Kratzer as it aired on WMOT-FM’s
“MTSU On the Record,” go to www.mtsunews.com. Cursor down to
“audio clips” and look for “Sex and Communication” to gain access to the
podcast.

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