To flirt or not to flirt that is the ? - Gay Guys! <3

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Ok so... I went out with some friends to eat... Had an amazing time ... Good conversation.. food was great!!! Love italian omnoms...even had the classic hot waiter ... All my friends were flirting with him x-cept me :0 ... Shocked??? So were my friends (not that I all out flirt Im usually too busy blushing to say anything ,but i partake in banter from time to time over the subject).. well I guess its only fair for me to say ... That i met this guy and nothing would make me happier than to call him mine ... He has my heart and doesn't fully realize it yet ..... So I mentioned this to my friends and they said there was nothing wrong with flirting ... And I told them there was flirting then there was sexual harassment which is what they were doing ... They called me lovesick and laughed it off... So im laying down in bed right now thinking...am I being too uptight over this.... I just don't want to do anything that will give the guy I like the wrong impression of me before he has the chance to get to know me further.( you know someone always knows someone that saw you doing something) ..... Let me explain a bit further... Yes there is more Srry &gt.

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Nick_Morgan

Nick_Morgan

7 posts

Posted April 17, 2012

It's hard to tell without actually being there... but personally, I actually think it's somewhat refreshing to see someone who actually realises the value of knowing when to stop when it comes to flirting. Personally, I dislike flirting though like you I accept it - I realise it's normal so I don't get angry or anything when people do it. I just try to be politely unresponsive in as friendly a manner as possible. Among gay guys, however, this often seems to transform you into some kind of man-hating spinster figure and people often just don't take the hint and keep going and going. It's quite annoying. If I were a woman, as you say, it would be considered sexual harassment. So in my opinion, I think caution in flirting with people generally is nothing to be ashamed of.

With regard to whether you should flirt with this guy you like, however, your friends are right - there's no harm in expressing an interest, so to speak. And if you don't, your mind then has the ability to take the idea for random walks, which can be very painful.

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Well first id like to thank you for taking the time to respond Nick I appreciate it.... And yeah flirting in the gay community can get out of hand on the first 30 seconds, because some guys out there dont know the difference between flirting and being disrespectful....and well yeah I know what you mean... The guy I like knows I'm intrested in him... Just doesn't know how... Hard I've fallen for him... And hes expressed intrest in me...I'm just taking things slow with him.....because I don't want to rush him into something so fast.... That will scare him off... Don't get me wrong either... Ill know when to pack up and move on... Im just taking a moment to hopefully add a partner to my journey ... P.S smile always

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

I don't think there is any thing wrong with how you handled the situation Luis. If you are pursuing someone that you want in your life, then flirting with other men seems wrong to me.

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Ty, for your words Tony... I just wanted to know what you all thought over this ... Seeing as the person that's fallen for another can't see what's going on or how their behavior changes... Just trying to stay myself and lvld

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Tommy_Storey

Tommy_Storey

2,086 posts

Posted April 17, 2012

I think that having a bit of Banter,is some times
good for the Soul, and i think that. that as long
you do not let it get out of hand,and your Partner
does not mind,then i don`t think,it does not any
Harm what so ever, xxxxxx

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Tommy...I agree if you are in a mature relationship (i.e. someone you've been with for quite a while). It's fun and flattering if someone flirts with you or your BF...to a point. But, in Luis's case he is just at the start of what will hopefully become a relationship. If think if someone was telling me they had a serious interest in me and then I saw them flirting with someone else, I wouldn't take them very seriously. That's just my opinion however.

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Yeah kind of what I was thinking Tony ... I think I would feel the same way .

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Tommy_Storey

Tommy_Storey

2,086 posts

Posted April 17, 2012

Yes i can see whare you are both comming from.
when you put it that way, xxxxx

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Tommy_Storey

Tommy_Storey

2,086 posts

Posted April 17, 2012

But when there is a stong Bond in between two peaple,
then i think that is then the right time to do a bit of flirting
as long as there is no objection`s from either party.

As you was saying Tony,it is nice to be Flattered some
times, and i can also be a bit of fun some time too flatter
some one too. I think that it put`s a bit of spice into life
as well, some time`s as well xxxxx

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Deleted-User

Deleted-User

Posted April 17, 2012

Well I totally get where you're coming from tommy ... I'm sure there won't be much trouble in an established relationship .... When and if there is a mutual understanding and respect between both parties

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nice to see some self respect Luis,its refreshing
I personally dont like flirting as its easily misunderstood and can get out of hand,seen it happen and it was ugly.But there is nothing wrong with a bit of banter.U stick to your guns and gd luck with the guy
Nice comments everyone gd to see again x