Never Kissed, 36 Years Old

It is quite possible for a path to lead directly to nothing, to never having done what you want, or experienced what you need, so do what you can, within reason and your own integrity, to counter this tendency to loneliness - it is all too easy.

I've never been in a relationship, never kissed a girl (I'm 36 so now I guess it's woman), am a virgin but don't really care about that. I am on meds for anxiety and depression so they dull some of my emotions and responses, though I was already that way to a great extent, but while I don't think about it consciously, it is always "there", knowing I've never had anyone to really confide in, to be intimate with, to share myself on all levels, to have a former stranger say "I love you". It hurts, even with the medication, it hurts so much.

I get you, I'm 29 and in the exact same situation, I don't want to care about it but I do, and when it comes to going "out there". I'm blocked somehow, like the fact of my situation saps any and all confidence I could have. I am a nice guy and most people I know like me (or at least it seems so). And yet, I won't change this. <br />What we need to know is not what we should do about it, we know it's all about going "out there"<br />we know it get's easier with practice<br />we know and accept that we'll get hurt in the process.<br /><br />I just don't know HOW to do it. A weird question, most take it for granted like breathing in a way, but I never learned it. <br />I don't know about you but this is how it is for me. And if it is the same for you then I think the only thing to do is simply, put on a blindfold and jump and don't look down before you do. That's what decided I was gonna do next time I meet someone interesting, no toughts, no intentions, no expectation, no hope. And if I crash, then good, I'll still go to bed damn proud of myself nonetheless.<br /><br />And don't fear pain, welcome it has the teacher it is.

Uh, no. A call girl is irrelevant, it isn't about sex, it is an intimacy that, to me, transcends that - it is being able to to open up to someone and share myself and they do the same, to have someone to confide in and talk to and to be the same for someone else. That is something you can't get or experience from such transitory options as suggested, those are surface concerns, this is deeper than that.

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