Monday, April 30, 2012

I had drafted this post a while ago, but somehow I delayed
it as I felt I still had some fine points to add to it. And by some strange
co-incidence, I saw the first episode of the show ‘Satyamev Jayate’ before
publishing this. So it made it easier for me to add the points which I had left
earlier in writing this piece.

While reading the latest anthropological data of India (for
my upcoming exams), I wasn’t at all surprised to find the child sex ratio dip
further to a mere 914. Ok, the gender of a baby is based on a 50-50
probability. But such a vast gender difference cannot be attributed to
probability alone. And as we all know, female feticide is the main reason for this
appalling sex ratio.

Thinking of it, I wondered why do people even consider such
a crime for the want of a male child. And after going through my observations
of people and some absolutely ridiculous mindsets throughout my life, I could
list the following reasons for the prevalence of female feticide in India.

The
want of a male child to continue the so called ‘vansh’.

A
male child would ensure more earning hands in a family with low economic
background.

A
male child would ensure that the parents are cared for in their old age.

A
female child would require saving money all life for her wedding. That
includes the dowry to be given along with.

Even
before the marriage of a female child and forever after that, her parents
and family would have to live a life of humbleness and humility in
relation to her husband and his family.

Ladies
under the influence of some unsaid comparative competition between
themselves take pride in their daughter-in-laws having a male child.

Women
themselves want a male child under some delusion of it being a sort of
redemption in the eyes of their husband and in-laws.

Here is what I feel about each of the above points I
mentioned.

Pedigree.
Do people actually know about their ancestors four or five generations ago
? If they don’t even know whose family tree they are so keen to expand,
what’s this big issue about the family lineage ?

Yes,
that does hold true for some (if not most) underprivileged families. But
I’ve seen it usually backfiring. I can recount at least half a dozen cases
which have two or more male children (who were obviously expected to help
in the family’s earnings), but still, they are the ones who do nothing
while the girl children of the family are burdened with the family’s
earnings. If that’s the case, then shouldn’t it be the other way round ?
Having more girl children to increase the family’s earnings. But either
way, it’s simply ridiculous.

Does
a son always ensure taking care of his old parents when they get old ?
Don’t we find sons at war to grab the parents’ property instead of taking
care of them ? Not that it is a generalization, but how can it be a surety
and a reason to want a male son too ?

That
is one of the main reasons for female feticide in most of India. As
soon as a girl is born, her parents start worrying about saving money for
her wedding. And if she is the second or third girl child, then the very
aim of the parents’ life becomes that to marry off their daughters. And
the dowry included actually seems to be the price they have to pay to marry
off their daughters. That’s why I’ve always felt that the very concept of
a wedding should be discarded. A wedding is the ultimate ghastly event
(for a girl’s parents/family) for which the girl suffers all her life
before and then all her life after.

Something
utterly preposterous I’ve seen and experienced is that how the girl’s
parents and family treat her husband and in-laws with folded hands and
bowed heads as if they were something divine just because they are their
daughter’s in-laws. I’ve seen fathers of girls who were getting married
tolerate absolute rogue-ness from the groom’s family before, during and
after the wedding. What advantage exactly does being a groom or his family
have over that of the bride ? Why should only the girl’s family bear all
the expenses of the wedding and not divide it equally between the two
families ? Why does a girl’s family feel helpless even after the girl
being subjected to torture after her marriage ? What exactly is this
outrageous mindset so strongly built in Indian families ?

A
girl’s family is always tensed about their family’s ‘honor’ that is
idiotically related to their girl and her life. In India, a
family’s so called honor and respect is ascertained by how their daughter
lives her life. What she does. How she dresses. Whom she befriends. Where
she goes. But the same family wouldn’t have a care in the world if they
have a son. No matter what he does in his life, it never concerns the
honor of the family.

It
is not just the males of the society, but even the highly educated females
who go berserk for want of a male child in their family. A lady would want
the extreme love and respect from her son, but would never allow him to do
the same with his wife. Recently, in my very close acquaintance, I came to
know of a case where a reputed lady doctor forced her son to torture his
newly wed wife to unbelievable extent so that she wouldn’t be able to
pursue her higher education. I guess such females want a son so that in
future they are in a position to torture another helpless female through
their sadist fantasies.

This
one, though sounding absolutely ghastly, is actually true in most cases
where young women yearn for a male child in order to get into the good
books of their husband and in-laws. Being a female themselves, they don’t
even think about the fact that they are ridiculing their own self. Women
who disown their daughters just because they wanted a son should not have
the right to motherhood. One can’t abuse motherhood once and enjoy it
another time.

And I wouldn’t forget the role of doctors in carrying out
such a ghastly crime as female feticide. Considering that most gynaecologists
in India
are females, it is absolutely shocking how females can themselves be so
heartless while murdering unborn females. Being from the Med field myself, I
hope that such criminals be brought to justice soon.

We all are so worked up against corruption in India recently.
But is monetary corruption all that we can care for ? Is anyone concerned about
this act of corruption at the level of one’s soul that has been happening since
long and still carrying on freely ? Would we come forward together in a war
against female feticide just as people did in the war against corruption ?