I am probably an example of the last person on earth you would like to be hearing from right now. I am a gay dad with a same-sex partner, who is raising two sons, adopted as young infants from foster care. I fight for the dignity of families like mine, and protection of the children in them, for their legal and ethical rights.

I realize that your mission is to “nullify” families like mine out of existence, or at the very least, to disappear from view, stripped of protections or recognition.

The purpose of this letter is not to tell you that we do exist, and we will not go away, but rather, to give you feedback on your recent state of self-starvation.

In your blog you state, “This has nothing to do with hatred of a group of people. I have friends and relatives who practice a homosexual lifestyle and I treat them with the same respect and kindness that I would anyone.”

The Massachusetts Supreme Court stated that whom one marries signifies one of the greatest acts of self-definition an individual can make in life. I would love to believe your sentiments as you state them, but your actions say differently.

Starving yourself to prevent your fellow citizens from marrying is not respectful. Leaving our children without social or legal standing is not kind. Your reference to specific relatives as “practicing a homosexual lifestyle” is dismissive, superficial and, quite frankly, rude.

With your recent intent to starve, you did exactly what both of my sons have attempted at times. They each have tossed away their dinners when they were not going to get their way over something. It is not OK for them to do that, and it is not OK for you to have attempted it either.

The fact is, you are not going to get what you want. Equality is an important value, and it is the key ideal for which our country stands. Your religious freedom is another important value, but in order for you to have it, your LGBT neighbors must be equally free to practice their own religious convictions, otherwise it is not freedom at all, it would be the imposition of tyranny.

You currently appear to be ordering pizza based on recent twitter posts, but should the next court decision start marriages up again, it is unclear if you will re-instate your fast. I am hoping you don’t.

What you are doing in this fasting activity, in a rather bizarre way, in your adult tantrum, is to take a human being hostage and threatened harm.

The fact that you are both the hostage taker and hostage in this situation is almost beside the point. You cannot be allowed to succeed due to your behavior, not because your ideas are wrong (as obviously, I think they are), but because your action of harm is wrong in itself, and we as a society, cannot reward it with fruition.

As another thinking, breathing, loving human on the planet, I care about you. I do not want you harmed and would like to see you healthy to argue your, albeit misguided, ideas yet another day. I sincerely think you need to be in protective custody.

If you take this much further, I can only hope people around you make those kind of arrangements.

I sincerely wish the best for you, but without you harming yourself or your LGBT neighbors. I hope you reconsider your actions and make a healthier choices through out this process.

Ideally, rather than starving yourself, I would rather you not only eat pizza, but go out for a pizza with my family, or a family like mine. Get to know those whom you seek to “nullify.” I would like you to see the love, respect and joy that we share. I would like you to see that real family is bigger than the Constitution, bigger than Utah and not worth fasting over to prevent.

It may be time to grow up and broaden your horizons. Better to do that on a full tummy.