Everything you ever wanted to know about the renowned healer, humanitarian, pretend doctor and greatest living human being ... The great, the wonderful, the magnificent, the Chuck Norris of cancer, the one, the only... NotDoctor LEONARD COLDWELL..

Friday, 23 September 2016

Well there's not been a huge amount to report from Lenny-Land over the
last few weeks.... The usual anti-Muslim, anti-Hillary and anti-Obama crap, plus a lot of "Look how fabulously wealthy and famous I am" nonsense
and not much more but today I came across another great example of
Coldwell not actually reading the webpages he links to...

First we had this...

...and then without pausing for breath this...

Clearly Lenny-The-Liar didn't actually bother to read either of them because what the have to say about his brudda-from-anudda-mudda, Joseph Mercola, is not exactly brimming over with enthusiasm.

Probably the funniest thing about this is the fact that Not-A-Doctor Coldwell is actually linking to Science Blogs a.k.a Respectful Influence which has a couple of posts about him...

Here are a few little quotes from Orac a.k.a REAL doctor David Gorski...

"Not surprisingly, Coldwell is not a real doctor. He’s never, as far as
I’ve been able to tell, earned an MD, although, like Robert O. Young, he
has degrees from diploma mills. Actually, it’s not clear what, if any, degrees he has, although he’s referred to himself as an ND and having four PhDs.

The bottom line is that Leonard Coldwell is a cancer quack of the most
despicable sort. There’s no evidence he can cure cancer. There’s no
evidence that he even knows what he’s talking about with respect to
cancer and lots of evidence that he is utterly clueless about cancer
biology. If there’s one thing I always dread about Breast Cancer
Awareness Month is that it always brings quacks like Coldwell out of the
woodwork."

"The closest I’ve ever come to going “full Orac” was when a patient asked me about Leonard Coldwell, because I view him to be as much a charlatan and con man as Brian Clement. I quickly restrained myself, but could not hide my alarm that my patient was thinking of going to Coldwell."

Wednesday, 7 September 2016

This is going to be one of my longest ever posts
but stick with it as it's very entertaining to watch a supposed
expert on beating stress getting seriously stressed out and losing
the plot entirely...

I've commented before on Lenny's habit of posing
with shiny things which show off his supposed immense wealth and
yesterday he was at it again...

Yeah... Really nice watches Lenny... Not...

Who in the real world would envy such tacky pieces
of horological tatt?.. Who with a shred of taste would waste €290,000
on pimp-bling like that? Even his own fans didn't seem to be very
impressed... Here's a selection of comments as ineptly translated by
Facebook...

"Strut strut, actually I was dr c
nice. I think I just changed my mind."

"This is so
silly"

"What exactly do you think to achieve?"

"Envy!!!! That's me so don't
care"

"You can have a full account, a steady job and
a roof over your head. But it is not good for your heart, all that is
worthless!"

"Dear Leonhard, if it's true,
I find that it is not so great. Sure it is damaging our awareness of
the global scientific medicine system."

"Have you
not noticed how sad this is, to post something like this? Is this the
direction the dr. Coldwell strikes?...."

"I have my family, love,
cohesion....... because I don't need no expensive watches"

"who
cares about a thing like that"

"Those are nice
watches. . I am not jealous. Dr. Coldwell for me is a genius. . A
really great one. . But the post is cheap!!!"

"Got
myself the Rolex, unfortunately, shows your level, your health
products are a long way overpriced. I know that I'm from Dr. Coaching
of heroes as recommended, at this time, no time for this.

"Since I wear a Rolex I know you
will only pay the name for Rolex the quality how real sapphire glass,
etc. There's even watches in under 100 €, the whole comparable
quality around 1000 € of honest asians grossfirmen but without
jewelry."

"Is this selfishness? I respect the
knowledge very from dr c. There was really the ego!"

"With
this kind of action you disappoint me, shame, shame......"

"With
this post your group is disqualified. Who sows the harvest and not
just good.... preach water and drink wine, then we have the like. By
the way, Patek Phillipe are by far the most beautiful and most
expensive watches in the world. In contrast, Rolex looks more like a
pimp, watch out. This has nothing to do with envy, but with style."

"If I had a lot of money, I would
never 3 watches for 290000 Euro Buy I find that out of his head. It
shows that they actually only partially off that's not nice."

"It's
all just material things.... yawn"

"I don't
understand, why so much money spent on a clock. It can be a bite? So
you can create something? I feel here honestly no envy. Just a little
disappointment this a kapitalumverteilng because of vanity and faith
takes place. I have nothing against jewelry and ornaments. But that's
just an optical matter and that's why I can't see the sense that it
is so much money is being spent. For me a sign that humanity still
has not changed."

"Slowly taking the post's here
from Dr. Coldwell strange trains. What's with the watches? It would
be better here is objectively and not as a kindergarten organized as
in the last time. You can also make you lose credibility when posting
such waste."

"Who need it, so has to brag.... it's
pretty poor.... blessed"

"Now you are a really great
one... people who grew up in prosperity, never post anything like
that. They are little man in my eyes. #Dislike #inferiority
complex"

"And always remember: it is only the evil
pharmaceutical industry, the you the money out of my pocket to
draw.The Dr. C is totally humble and makes it out of
philanthropy!!!!"

"He is so unselfish this bernd
Klein. Who actually money to such a con artist brings must be
absolutely inane."

"A Self-expression of
self-love"

"No envy, just not nice, I'm glad it's
pretty watches for less money. Keep calm you at rolex"

Lenny doesn't seem to have grasped the fact that
he can't realistically make himself out to be a great philanthropist
and humanitarian whilst simultaneously boasting of his incredible
imaginary wealth. He must know by now that the truth is well and
truly out there when it comes to his fake qualifications, fake life
story and fake claims to humanitarianism. He can't put the cat back
in the bag so he's reverted to his tired old "I'm immensely rich
and everybody who criticises me is just jealous" schtick.

But
it doesn't work any more...

The idea that anybody would be so envious of
such ludicrously tasteless chronographs as to give themselves an
ulcer is too idiotic for words... Personally speaking I've not worn a
watch since I started carrying a mobile phone two decades ago and
even when I did wear a watch it was a £100 present from my other
half. It told the time well enough and as I didn't need to bolster my
fragile ego with conspicuous consumption it was every bit as good as
a Rolex... Or a fake Rolex...

The above Facebook post was made
yesterday morning UK time... Within minutes of my mocking it on my
Twitter feed... POOF!!! It was gone...

...about an hour or two after deleting
his post he posted this incandescent-with-rage screed.... Supposedly
written by one of his secretaries... The no doubt very lovely
'Catherine'. If you ask me it has Lenny's pudgy little finger-prints
all over it...

...and it goes on... and on... and
on... For over 2000 words.

Here is the complete post in all of its automatically
translated fury with my comments added. I've divided it up
into something like normal paragraphs rather than just one long 2100
word paragraph because Lenny... Sorry.... Catherine doesn't seem to
have bothered

"This is my last post here! I'm sick of
it!"

We should be so lucky...

"Stupid-people-test carried out
successfully."

Oh... It was test was it?
Nothing to do with people taking the piss out of your vulgar watches
and your vulgar display of 'wealth'?

"Catherine Dr Cs
Personal Assistant has carried out a test yesterday to see how
gehirngewaschen and stupid-socially the Germans with a communist
ideas are indoctrinated."

Communist? What
the fuck? What planet is this guy on?

"Test was some of
dr cs watches via photo to post to all hidden envious people and
losers find on our pages. So this is a regular stupid-people
cleaning. On the other hand, dr c has instructed us to test why the
Germans still so poor even though they are the strongest economic
power in the world are (per capita)."

Why does Germany
not lick my arse for being so magnificently wealthy I can post a
picture of three tacky looking watches which I claim are worth
€260,000? The ungrateful fuckers... They should be bowing down before their god!!!

"The answer
for your individual poverty is your brainwashing. The NWO and their
super puppets like merkel, don't want your money, because you could
be otherwise. You could get healthy food and health etc and not be
afraid of diseases."

Why does he assume
people need to be told what a healthy diet is by a short and VERY FAT
old man who is hardly a picture of youthful vigour?

"You
could get a lawyer or more, and to your right."

So
can you Lenny... Put your immense fortune where your immense mouth
is. Get a lawyer and sue me.

"You can tell your children
healthy clothes and shoes so that they are not from China products
are being poisoned or the healthy growth through wrong footwear."

Eh? Poisoned footwear from China? W.T.A.F?

"You
could stop being jealous because you yes in the deepest part all
jealous of successful people and their property, and instead of envy
and self-loathing and the attempt to hinder success, and even earn
money from you that you claim you want or Don't need this luxury
goods or the luxury holidays etc really finally even afford. Envy is
only because you want something that you can't afford it, and thus no
other treats."

Lenny... Seriously... Give over with the “everybody envies my immense wealth” routine... Nobody believes it any more. Your IBMS Deutschland scheme is at the very least your FIFTH attempt at running a get rich quick scheme and like all of your previous attempts (NAPS, “Lenny The Life Coach” GIN and IBMS USA) it will end ignominiously when your pitiful collection of suckers finally realise you're full of shit and have nothing to offer apart from “The Law of Attraction” garbage and a lot of boasting crap.

"Here
but the core of this postes: you have been trained to like animals to
accept it, it is acceptable to be poor. (but it's not, if your
children are driving an expensive car, 10 times they are as safe as
in the cheap boxes) you will be made with a rothschild system from
taxes, interest and rent always kept arm now whether you believe them
or not ...... You will be with the tax office and illegal taxes
(slavery) below and the laws of any legal basis in chess and have
kept quiet. And you're naive enough to think that that is acceptable
and is right."

Taxes are illegal? Really?
I seem to remember your former husband Kevin Trudeau saying that...
You remember him don't you Lenny? You were his “personal physician
in Europe and there are still plenty of videos of you billing and
cooing over each other before he sacked you and then got
jailed.

Presumably YOU don't pay your "illegal" taxes either... Does the
North Carolina office of the IRS know about your magnificent wealth?
Perhaps I'll give them a call and put them in the picture... Does the word 'audit' mean anything to you?

"You're like dogs trained and
conditioned! An example:Danielle will post a photo of dr c before
the new natures tribute poster and an asocial rat post as a comment:
the power but also to all the moneyHere is my comment: this
stupid a... is so important is trained to behave like programmed, if
someone is successful. I wonder, what are you working or this
brain-washed failure with this conditioned envious behavior? For
Money I think."

Sorry... Can't decipher
that at all.

"Money is the only measuring tool
for success and the only way to happiness and freedom! Oh I can hear
your communist thoughts and the trained behavior: money alone is also
not happy. Money can't buy love. (really? ) everything is nothing
without a lot of money a lot of money. Money is freedom, training for
your children, good partnerships (by money worries break most
relationships. ). Only money is freedom or your boss and
duchgeknallte officials or your best friend from social services
which gives you the food stamps, you should be monitoring your life,
just because you have to mark not to starve to death.Money
is the only tool for measuring success and if you're not 100% devoted
to accumulating wealth you will be poor and unhappy... Really?"

No
Lenny it really isn't and I would've thought that somebody who
constantly rails against the greed of BIG FARMER/The Rothschilds/The
Jews and boasts of his unaccredited but very prestigious Doctor of
Humanities degree would know better.

This might come as
something of a surprise to you but most people are content with a
moderate income and moderate tastes with as much time as possible
spent with family and friends doing what they enjoy. OK... Most
people can't afford a wardrobe full of custom made Rolexes... I very
much doubt you can either but you are missing the fact that most people don't WANT a collection of
Rolexes and wouldn't waste €260,000 on them even if they COULD
afford it. Does a 24kt diamond encrusted Rolex tell the time any
better than a £100 Accurist? No... It doesn't. The only reason
anybody would waste money to that extent is a vulgar display of
conspicuous consumption... It might impress morons but everybody else
thinks it make you look a pratt.

"Money and wealth are
the only tool to be healthy and happy. Just so you can do is afford
the regular holidays a charge and keeping healthy. Only with a lot of
money do you have time for your children. Only with a lot of money,
there is less stress and worry!"

My
father was an engineer with a modest income... He had time for us
because he worked a 40 hour week and earned enough to feed and clothe
us and put a modest roof over our head. What's wrong with that?

Even if you were as wealthy as you claim... And I don't believe you are wealthy at all... It doesn't seem to have bought you any happiness. I've seen your multiple Facebook accounts and you seem to live in a perpetual state of anger. You don't like Jews, you don't like black people, you don't like Muslims, you don't like Mexicans, you don't like liberals... In fact you don't actually seem to like anybody except Donald Trump and Adolf Hitler.

All that stress can't be doing you any good Bernd. Particularly when you must have a BMI that would make a hippopotamus wince. In my professional clinical opinion you look a lot like what doctors call "A heart attack waiting to happen".

"There is no good, effective experts
(Doctor, lawyer, consultant, trainer etc) the broke. Because money is
the logical consequence of good results for his patients, readers,
students, etc."

Nonsense... Not
everybody is obsessed with wealth for the sake of it like you... Not that you are actually wealthy of course... Your act is pitifully transparent.

"Why should otherwise 57 million people dr cs books in 9
languages have bought?"

Oh... You've
sold 57 million books now have you? That would put you in the running for
one of the best selling authors of all time and yet your books are
published by a company that runs a vanity press and you have
virtually no presence on Amazon and no presence at all on
Wikipedia.

Last week you were claiming to have 57 million 'readers' which isn't the same thing. If you had really sold 57 million books that would put you somewhere in the Stephen King catagory of authors but NO FUCKER HAS EVER HEARD OF YOU.

Pull the other one Lenny... It's got bells on...

"And why not buy
your book, if you have one. Nothing is essential because you've done
or unusual. Why did dr c 1.6 billion views on his videos? Something
vital because he has to say."

1.6 billion? That's funny because a few months ago you were claiming 1.3
MILLION... Those servers at YouTube must be near melting point with those other 1,598,700,000 views in just a few weeks.

Do you EVER think or reach for a calculator before you pull numbers out of your arse or do you simply not care how ridiculous you make yourself appear with these grandiose claims?

"Why is the the meis booked guest on all radio and tv interviews and
will always be ordered? Because of the best in his field is and
something important has to say, that the entire humanity helps,
healthier and happier."

I've noticed that
when you say 'radio and TV' what you actually mean is 'INTERNET
radio' and 'INTERNET TV'... Not really the same thing Lenny old
sport.

"If a speaker or coach of the best part is that
he will also paid. Money is the natural reflection of the services
and lasting results.Why trained dr c for the largest company in
the world. Because He's the most effective and best in the world is,
at what he does."

Please name these
“largest companies in the world” so I can give them a call.

"If
we do not take the 700 000 euros a year to pay legal bills and could
have the losers and potential murderers from the medicine and
pharmacy long silenced! If we are not the best bodyguards for dr c
could pay, wouldn't it be at the 4 Mordversuchen stayed."

Did you really
spend €700,000 on that lawsuit against Connie, Jason, RW and WHOIS?
I hope you got your money back because that was the most inept
lawsuit I've ever seen. Even the inept lawyers could see through your lies and dumped you... And then there was the case against Jason a few years ago where your lawyer also dumped you and you failed to appear in court.

"How did dr c $ 5.1 million in
his education and training in the last 4 decades pay? Because He's
the best, and often the only one who stay at the highest level
results can produce and therefore also always best has been
paid."

$5,100,000 and yet all you have to
show for it are half a dozen crappy, worthless cards from internet based
'alternative health' organisations, a few amateurish certificates...
Oh... And a badly altered fax that says you went to a dentist's
convention in Berlin in 1994... Even then you have altered the name on the 'certificate' from something to 'Dr Leonard Coldwell... A name you hadn't even thought of at that stage. I'm guessing that even with your
'psychology doctorate' from that defunct diploma mill you'd still
have change from $1000.

Where are these other three
doctorates that you sometimes claim you've got and sometimes seem to
forget about? Where are your four 'doctor degrees' whatever they are?
Where is there any evidence whatsoever that you were qualified to
practice medicine in Germany?.. You were in general practice for 16
years after all weren't you?

"Money a lot of money is
the only yardstick for realizing. If you need a lawyer, do you want
the housing in the basement as loose lives, with holes in the
clothing and unwashed (proof for versagertum) or the lawyer of the 10
partner 50 secretaries and 20 $ 000 Suits like dr c is wearing? Who
do you think you can best protect and defend your right to get. Who
is poor, is also not worth anything to performance measured. Poverty
is a way of life. (means have given up on themselves to
believe."

I've seen your lawyers Lenny...
Culbertson and Associates... They live in what looks like a converted
fire-station (just like the Ghostbusters... Cool eh?) and I've seen
your suits... They look more like $20.00 from a charity shop than
$20,000... For god's sake man... I've seen tramps better dressed than
you and that blue suit you're wearing while you pose next to your new
range of alternative 'supplement' doesn't even cover your ever
expanding gut.

"The only cause of cancer and other
autoimmune disorders, is always stress. Mental and emotional stress.
A life lived in fear, worry, doubt, hopelessness, lack of self-love
and lack of hope! All of this is the result of a lack of resources.
With enough money you can his life challenges with a stick."

Two
words... 'Steve' and 'Jobs'.

"If someone like dr c 9000
plus time on radio and tv interviews was, 3 years in advance is sold
out, 1.4 million thank-you got the confirm that all these people dr c
owe their lives etc then this is the result of it He's the only one
of the best is and money is the natural reflection for success and
results."

Fantasy doesn't become fact
through repetition you know Lenny... Booked three years in advance
for what? You rarely do anything apart from repost bigoted crap on
Facebook... You always find time for that... When you're not banned
that is.

"Those who have no money have themselves to
blame. Poverty is a reflection of what ought to be the man inside
believes that he is worth."

Or perhaps they're not obsessed with money for its own sake... By the way... Extreme wealth and extreme poverty are two ends of a continuum... In the middle there are varying degrees of content with modest means and time to enjoy life.

"Dr C is the most powerful person in
the today's alive"

Hahahahaha...
Really? I wonder which is biggest... The observable universe or
1% of your inflated ego.

"9000 plus emails per day."

Spam is a bugger innit?

"Consultant of most of the most powerful
people in the world."

Name just one.

"The only one who can be proven to cure
cancer."

You have NEVER proven you have
cured even ONE person of anything let alone cancer.

"Millions
of thanks to videos, audios etc. His website is in the top 0.5 % of
all websites in the world."

Top 0.5% puts
you in the top 5,000,000... Yes FIVE FUCKING MILLION... Congratulations... Idiot.

"In
everything he does he is demonstrably the very best."

Says
himself and nobody else... Well... His mother perhaps.

"He has countless true friends since 30, 40 years ago. Who's seen him live and get to know why the friend know the dr c for many decades."

Yeah... My mum
came to see me in a nativity play too... I was third wise man... The
one with the myrrh... It was a vase with tinfoil on it really but
impressive none the less.

"Dr C is mega rich because he
deserved it."

No Lenny... You're
not. Nobody believes you have a private jet, a butler and a fleet of luxury cars.

"Wealth have to be earned. Money reflects the value
of the people who provide for other people, is the reflection of
services for others. Those who have no money is worth nothing, in
relation to his services for others. Poor alternative practitioner as
well as poor lawyers."

What in the name
of holy fuck are you wibbling on about now you buffoon? The nice lady on the supermarket checkout this morning has performed a more valuable service to others than you ever have.

"And
so that you may in Germany all helpless and docile are and will
remain, you're drizzling with social (Communist) to be a good idea
and sit you constantly a new brainwashed by the media. Just so your
arm remains and even defended the right and look at."

The fact that people find your "Money is everything and I'm mega-wealthy, just look at my expensive watches" puerile and egotistical does not make them communists... It makes them human beings...

"Dr C has proved it all, he has 4 Doctor Title
(everything can be viewed on the web)..."

No Lenny...
You have proven nothing. That pitiful collection of crap on your bio
site does not make you a doctor any more than your four fantasy PhDs
do... They just make you look dumb.

"...was approved
doctor until he on 18 January 2016 his approval for business has not
renewed."

You are not a doctor... Not
now... not in the past.. and you never will be. Incidentally you really ought to
put more effort into keeping your story straight because you have
been making the same claim about retiring from treating patients for
years and it's always a different story.

Here's a direct offer from me to you... Post on the internet a single copy of a licence to practice medicine issued to you in any country at any time and I'll take this whole blog down... Completely and permanently.

Deal?

"He's got
millions of fans and the is the person with the most genuine friends
in the world. I wonder why?"

He says...

"He never has to be, that's why
millions of paid for it with his name and reputation being
damaged."

Another 'fact' you've pulled
directly out of your arse... Not one shred of evidence.

"Due
to the fact that all the accusations are only lying to him and never
will be anything negative will be demonstrated. If there is even the
slightest sin, knew would give the whole world now. Believe
me."

Nobody does believe you Lenny and as for "If there is even the
slightest sin, knew would give the whole world now" the truth about your lies, deceit and scamming ARE out there for the whole world... That's what's really worrying you hence your serial attempts at law suits to silence your critics... All of which have FAILED!

"Definierungsversuche such as he is
not a doctor or even has a doctor title already therefore fall flat
because it's been 30 years since the dr c in Germany is never a court
judgment against him. Reason: it's all true what he says. Nothing can
surpass the truth. Dr C would be in prison for a long time, if he
does not tell the truth."

You
are stupid but you're not stupid enough to try to pretend to be a medical
doctor in Germany like you do in the USA because you aren't qualified
and the German authorities would be down on you like a tonne of
bricks. You have said yourself that your 'qualifications' are not
valid in Germany and you do not have the title of doctor there. You
can't have it both ways... Either you were in general practice in
Germany for 16 years, in which case you are a doctor or you aren't a
doctor in which case your story about being in general practice is a
lie. It's blindingly obvious to anybody with a scrap of intelligence
that you tell totally different and contradictory stories to
different audiences.

"Then believe so many stupid people,
that one of the meistbeschäftigsten people of the world his own
facebook pages, etc. How stupid can one be only. Of course, there are
instructions from dr c as the are to operate."

Leonard my dear fat friend... You clearly don't seem to grasp the fact that due to your poor literacy and habit of repeating the same boasts over and over again your writing style is quite distinctive.

You've been telling this "I didn't post that... Amy / Sarah / hackers / Facebook / Catherine / some passing cat did" story every time you realise you've made a tit out of yourself for years. Do you seriously expect people are going to believe there are all of these people with access to your accounts all posting things that make you look like you?

"Because the
envious people and enemy nothing to dr c have to invent can attack
and create fake websites the only fuller lies are and use your own
web site as proof of their lies."

Please supply the URL of these 'fake websites' because I can't find any of them... Or do you mean this blog, Connie's blog, Salty Droid and Rationalwiki none of which are FAKE. They all have contact email addresses on and are all open to being served with another of your ill-advised and fatally doomed libel suits. Once again the email address for this blog is leonardnotwell[at]gmail.com

"If something isn't it would be
the dr c says his 92.3 % Cancer Rate (out of 3 doctors confirmed and
several studies)."

You have never provided a scrap of credible evidence that you have ever cured anybody of anything anywhere in the world. Your 92.3% claim only goes back about five years to the time you invented it. The three 'independent' verifications you claim come from two 'institutes' that don't exist and your friend and fellow quack Thomas Hohn... You remember him don't you? He was at your IBMS meeting last week... I've seen (and saved) the pictures.

Incidentally I can add up and and your
story about being in general practice doesn't add up unless you
started medical school at the age of fifteen. Given you've quite
clearly never been to medical school at all everybody can work out
you are lying through your teeth.

"If he had no doctor title, if he's not the
only successful on his territory, he'd be in a long time been in
court. But instead of having to prove that the envious people and
paid internet trolls, have the right to throw this only with baseless
and false accusations to be the only way."

What do you mean 'if'? You DON'T have a doctor title. Let's look at your utterly laughable 'doctor' qualifications...

1. Doctorate in psychology from Columbia State University c1998 - Worthless crap from a now defunct diploma mill.

2. Honorary Doctor of Humanities from Louisiana Baptist University c2011 - More worthless crap from a diploma mill. Does not entitle you to practice medicine and it's actually very bad form to use an honorary title and downright deceptive to omit the 'h.c.' (honoris causa).

Then moving onto your 'accredation' certificates on your bio website which look like they were created in Microsoft Paint by a colourblind quadriplegic...

4. American Association of Drugless Practitioners 11/11/2002 - Worthless crap. Current cost of certificate $285. Not a medical qualification. Actually the same organisation as at 3 above.

5. National Association of Certified Natural Health Professionals 27/10/2007 - Source not available on Google. Probably now the Trinity School of Natural Health. Certificate charge $1,250. Certainly not a medical qualification.

6. The Institute of the Natural Association of Certified Natural Health Professionals (what a mouthful) c2007 - Source not available on Google. Probably now the Trinity School of
Natural Health as at 5 above. Certificate charge $1,250. Certainly not a medical
qualification.

7. World Organization of Natural Medicine Practitioners 2009 - This is probably the most outstanding certificate on display... Outstanding for its amateurishness. I've seen more professional certificates produced by a five year old chimp with a box of crayons. The WORNMP is based out of what appears to be a mail-drop in Toronto Canada and their website is laughably full of quackery and nonsense. Most certainly NOT a medical qualification.

8. A framed chip from the Berlin wall c2003 - No... I don't know how this counts as accreditation either... Totally bizarre.

9. A copy of a faxed certificate of attendance at a dentist's convention amateurishly edited to change the name to "Dr Leonard Coldwell" from whatever it used to say. 10/03/1994 - No... Me either.

10. A certificate from The Sovereign Medical Order of the Knights Hospitaller. 2009 - Actually I was wrong at 7 above when I said it was the worst certificate. This 'Diploma in Professional Health Counselling (DIP.PHC)' is absolutely clip-art-tastic in its artless execution. The SMOOTKN, a.k.a the Sacred Medical Order Church of Hope, is a completely bogus organisation based in St Kitts Nevis. Certificate charge $1000. Not a medical qualification.

11. The other three PhDs and the four 'Doctor Degrees'... No evidence whatsoever that they have ever existed outside of your own empty head.

So there you have it... All of the board certified this, doctorate in that and diplomas in the other actually add up to precisely the square root of fuck all.

"Because the nothing what the
envious people have their defa mierung skampa can never build, write
in comments that the spelling isn't right. (only stupid focus on
knowledge as grammar and intelligent people focus on the often
lifesaving content). This following: how can someone be so stupid to
believe dr c is doing his own posts on FB. (this is so incredibly
funny)"

Your poor spelling, poor punctuation, abysmal capitalisation, malapropisms and ranting style make it quite obvious that it's you posting Lenny... Unless of course you specially train your imaginary staff to make post containing exactly the same poor spelling, poor punctuation, abysmal capitalisation, malapropisms and ranting style as your own posts... A 'house style' if you will.

"1. Dr C is for 32 years in the United States
and speaks only English. What he on Katie or Danielle to post
forwards is written in English where there are also no big and small
letters, and of his secretaries via Google Translator, translated and
post so. So complain the paid informers and internet trolls on the
spelling and lead this as proof that it spelling mistakes in the
translation is that he's not a doctor or a doctor can be, because the
spelling in German language a us American is not correct. This is the
same as one would say :"at night it's colder than outside""

No BIG or small letters in written English? Not in yours maybe but I have an English language O level (grade C) and I seem to use them quite a bit. What a ridiculous thing to say.

I really can't work out what he's trying to say... Is it that a 'mega-best-selling author', who is a native German speaker and 'mega-rich' is incapable of writing his own posts or employing a secretary who is fluent in German and has instead to rely on Google translate? Really?

22 book best seller in 9 languages,
4.6 million live seminar participants 35 000 from dr c personally
with ibm's cured patients. Million healed through his books and
videos and interview information indirectly healed. The largest
company in the world call dr c the only the immediate permanent and
constantly growing positive results in people can lead.

A best selling author who is barely literate? OK...

As for your fantasy about the 35,000 cancer patients Lenny... Well... I've said it before... I can add up. I can also multiply and divide and on a good day subtract and work out averages and this claim is patently absurd.

Even if we ignore the 16 years you were supposed to have been in general practice the amount of time available to you would mean you diagnosed, treated, 'cured' and followed up each patient in just over 40 minutes... Total.

If you'd claimed it was 3,500 you might... just might... be saying something believable but not you... If you're going to tell a lie you like to make it a whopper. This is why your lies are so pitiful.

44 years of provable successes in
never before geahnter and inimitable form are not enough for the
stupid-people are still not enough because their brain this scope to
success not process or understand. Losers just can't understand how
someone a winner a champion can be. This is exactly why the yes also
remain poor and failure.

44 years of charlatanism, fakery and scamming perhaps.

"Never mind, I just got dr c said
that I am no longer prepared to me with such idiots kinda the are so
stupid that you and say or want to dictate what we post on our pages
or not supposed to. The stupidity of this worthless clowns is easy
for me. Unbelievable. We give this waste life-saving information and
have the audacity to want to tell us how we (Champions with a proven
track record and a lot of money) our work to do."

Has Lenny... sorry 'Catherine'... been living under a rock for the last ten years? He... sorry... she, doesn't seem to have grasped the concept of social media. The whole fucking point of Facebook is that people CAN comment on what you say. If you don't want people to disagree with you then lock down your profile and don't 'friend' people or post to your own website... Otherwise grow a fucking backbone.

"I was the the here for dr c all
health issues has answered. I'm his chiropractors, Naturopathic
Doctor and friend for 31 years and have to tell you, most of you are
not a single syllable to help and information here worth it."

Maybe I'm missing something but what does a man who claims to be the world's leading doctor want with a doctor? I thought all illness was caused by stress and only you can heal yourself.

"Dr c
needs you but not a day will come when you will realize that you need
it and its information training and help. Why do you think we have
with the ibm's ms in just 10 months over 29 000 members? Because we
produce results and not others. It's easy! And we're all financially
independent because we do it in the truest sense of the word
deserve:"

29,000 members but I count only 43 people in the group photo at the weekend's shindig.

I really must drop the North Carolina tax office a line about these 29,000 members. What's the going rate for joining the IMBSMS these days?.. $1000 or so? That would be 29 million dollars to pay tax on... OUCH!

"Now you complaining about my grammar in German and focus
on the lack of punctuation etc instead to understand the dr c just
save your life and wanted to make it better."

When I was at school I was taught that failure to at least make an effort to use correct spelling, punctuation, capitalisation, syntax and grammar shows a lack of respect for your reader. I'm not perfect and make mistakes like everybody else but I do at least TRY.

"LmaaDr Vincent
Alexander from now on, former coaching for ibm's ms in Germany. I
don't waste second more with undankbarem wissern pack and better."

Sorry folks... I can't make any sense of that.

"Schlaumeiern and stupid-people poverty fight, love and success to
vaccinations, Chemtrails, Monsanto poisons etc to die. Loves the
poverty and the envy. You poor, poor and proud of it."

I can't make much out of that but it contains the word 'chemtrail' so it's bound to be bollocks.

So... There you have it...

Lenny makes a fool of himself and then, rather than just discretely deleting the post and forgetting about it, he goes off on an epic rant which makes him look an even bigger fool. He doesn't even have the balls to post under his own name and invents 'Catherine' to do it.

Even by your execrable standards Lenny... That's pathetic.

I'm pleased to say that as of that post Not-A-Doctor 'Catherine' hasn't posted in over 24 hours... Perhaps he's on his private jet being served €1000 lunches by his butler whilst wearing one of his €20,000 suits and a €260,000, 24ct, custom made, diamond encrusted Liberace watch.

Tuesday, 6 September 2016

Towards the end of last week I mentioned the fact that Lenny had gone off on a monumental rant about his critics... by which I'm assuming he was including me... and how he "spat in our faces"...

I was going to do a point by point rebuttal but on further reflection I've decided that parody is more fun...

And so...

Bloke
Down The Pub Medical System®

Welcome
CHAMPIONS®

Having
seen the undoubted success of Lenny The Liar's 'Instinct Based
Medicine System” and taken notice of the fact he managed to attract
upwards of twenty suckers to his German 'events' I have come to
realise that there are still people in this world gullible enough to
believe a 'medicine system' based not on science or evidence but on
complete bullshit... And part with good money to the scamming, lying,
utterly fraudulent inventor of the system no matter how utterly
inane, illogical or flying in the face of 300 years of medical
progress it is. That said I can't help but notice that given the one
hundred new members joining every day that Lenny was claiming some
months ago the turnout wasn't that great... But anyway... Some
suckers is better than no suckers I suppose.

I'm therefore
very happy to announce the launch of my revolutionary new Bloke
Down The Pub Medical System® and the Bloke Down
The Pub Medical System® Master's Society®.

Not-A-Doctor
Leonard Coldwell has led the way with his “medical system” based
on “instinct” whereby the very notion that important or even
life-or-death decisions should be made with the assistance of science
and qualified experts is thrown down the toilet and replaced by
'instinct' or “I dunno... What do you reckon?”.

In that
spirit I have devised the ONLY fully holistic medical system which is
based entirely on asking the opinion of some random bloke down the
pub.

Important breakthroughs are being made on a daily basis.
Only yesterday a bloke in a pub told me that he'd heard you can get
cancer from looking at pictures of Johnny Depp while another bloke in
another pub held that HIV was not a sexually transmitted disease but
was in fact caused by chewing bus tickets. Obviously they must be
right because reasons. Who do YOU want to believe? The CORRUPT
MEDICAL ESTABLISHMENT and BIG FARMER or some pissed bloke I bumped
into down the pub®?

As
a further service of the BDTPMS® I will also be
launching the Bloke Down The Pub Medical System Master's
Society® which will be a private, members only, secret
society “for winners by winners”® where you can learn the
“secrets”® of untold “wealth”®. Quite what
this has to do with medicine is not readily apparent but I'll think
of something sooner or later... It'll probably be something to do
with stress... Trust me... I'm a doctor*.

Included
in your membership of the BDTPMSMS® of only €1000pa
in advance plus €500 joining fee** you will get access to an online
library which I have inexplicably decided is worth €1,200,000 even
though it's the same shit you can get elsewhere for nothing and the
right to attend twice yearly seminars in a 1 star hotel in
Cleethorpes (a fee of €600 will be chargeable plus booking fee,
accommodation fees, car parking charges, flights, transfers, airport
taxes, buffet meal charge, over-priced and watered down hotel drinks
and a range of very reasonably priced prostitutes). I will also send
you THREE of the best selling CDs I can find in the Oxfam shop and a
DVD copy of the remake of “The Producers”, which was
disappointing quite frankly, but to which I've unilaterally ascribed
a value of €50,000.***

BUT WAIT!!!

THERE'S
MORE!!!

Members of the BDTPMSMS® will also
get the exclusive right to purchase (for €950.00 + P&P) my new,
upcoming, soon to be published, when I've written it, bound to be a
mega bestseller, book “The Only Answer To Not Being Fleeced
By Charlatans” (by email and in .pdf format). All proceeds
will got to my Foundation For a Drug and Crime Free Antarctica
of which I am the founder, president, chairman. treasurer, sole
beneficiary and chief penguin.

*
The Bloke Down The Pub Medical System® Master's Society®”
states categorically that it does not offer dangerously bad medical
advice even though it clearly does exactly that. Readers agree that
the medical opinions offered by Bloke Down The Pub Medical
System® Master's Society®” are not genuine medical
advice and are based entirely on opinion, wild speculation, the
non-existent clinical experience of Dr Longdog Coleslaw, the
ill-informed ramblings of a “bloke down the pub”®
and whatever turns a dishonest profit. They are, in short, complete
bullshit and the reader indemnifies Bloke Down The Pub Medical
System® Master's Society®” against all allegations
of “giving advice that could get them killed”® because they
believed some con-man on the internet rather than a real, qualified
doctor.

**
No refunds. All transactions are final. Payment by untraceable
Western Union transfer only. Do NOT seek the advice of a competent
adult before sending payment... Which bit of “SECRET society” are
you having trouble with?

*** Subject to availability. We
reserve the right to substitute a used DVD of similar or lower value
or nothing at all at our total discretion.

BIOGRAPHY OF DR
LONGDOG COLESLAW.

Dr Longdog Coleslaw.

NMD
DNM PhDx7 MDx5 D.HUM CNHP BMDNot a Medical DoctorBored and
Certified Doctor of Not Medicine.Burned and Crucified Alternative
Medical Phondeller.Has appeared on local radio phone-ins
complaining about dog shit on the pavement.Award watching
author.Brave Maverick Doctor.

Has
never been convicted of rape.

Dr
Longdog Coleslaw – De-motivational speaker and help yourself
(shoplifting) education expert. The world's leading authority on
everything including trolley-bus maintenance, dinosaur breeding and
dodo pickling. Dr Coleslaw is a board certified and accredited NMD
(Not a Medical Doctor). His badly written mega-best-selling work is
available in three different languages... English, Gibberish and
Bullshit.

“Dr L” as he is known to his hundreds of fans
has been awarded no less than SEVEN PhDs but unfortunately he seems
to have mislaid the award certificates and forgotten which
universities awarded them, when, and what the subjects of his theses
were so you'll just have to take his word for it.

Dr Coleslaw
was also awarded an honorary Doctor of Humanities degree from the
unaccredited but very prestigious Hull Baptist College of Divinity
and Bricklaying.

Dr Longdog has achieved the unique feat of
being granted five 'doctor degrees' (whatever they are) but the
certificates went missing around the same time as the PhD
certificates so you'll just have to take his word for that too.

He
also has six average grade GCEs and a Heavy Goods Vehicle licence...
That much at least is true.

Dr
Coleslaw began his career as a healer at the age of sixteen months...
Or was it sixteen years?.. When he cured his mother of bubonic
plague, smallpox, scrofula, the two tone Chinese pox and vCJD 42
years before it was discovered. At the time her conventional doctors
had given her 42 minutes to live but she is alive and well 42 years
later. Doctor Coleslaw likes the number 42 a lot... He's probably
read H2G2 way too many times.

“Dr L”, as he is known to
his thousands of fans, has dedicated his life to natural but very
lucrative if completely ineffective 'cures' to stress related
illness which includes whatever the gullible
'patient' happens to have at the time... Or whatever he can
get away with telling them they have.

After
sixteen days Dr Longdog Coleslaw left general practice in Chatham
when the authorities broke down the door to his consulting rooms / cockroach infested bed-sit. This was obviously down to the fact that Big Farmer and
the medical establishment were threatened by his proven 92.3% cure
rate and nothing at all to do with the fact he had no real
qualifications and wasn't licensed to practice medicine... Oh no...
DEFINITELY a conspiracy!! The medical establishment spends
£42,000,000 per year to try to destroy his reputation with the truth
lies. He has been shot 42 times, had his car firebombed 42 times and
receives 42,000 death threats every day.

At
some indeterminate time in the past Dr Longdog Coleslaw sold his
entirely imaginary hospitals to his friend Dr Dave Downthepub of The
Strood Institute For Made-up Medical Statistics who will
'independently' verify his 92.3% success rate if he asks him to. He
then moved to The People's Republic of Hull where he converted his
fake qualifications into other fake qualifications whilst devoting
his life to his applied research into scamming, grifting and posting
crap to Facebook.

Some of Dr Coleslaw's inimitable
imaginary successes and achievements are 1.6 billion video views (up
from a paltry 1.3 million the last time he made this claim last year)
4.6 million seminar attendees, 420,000,000 readers, guest spots on
innumerable TV programs (Crimewatch, The News at Ten, Watchdog, I'm a
pretend doctor get me out of here). He is the pretend doctor that the
imaginary doctors that exist only in his head go to when they or
their families are ill.

Dr Coleslaw is definitely, definitely,
DEFINITELY a real doctor and definitely NOT a short, bald, fat, toxic
little turd with bogus qualifications who posts increasingly racist,
anti-Semitic and just generally bigoted shite to the internet.
Anybody who says he's a nasty little neo-Nazi charlatan will feel the
full wrath of his £42,000,000 £700,000 a year legal team... “I
will start the fight but I will never follow through because I don't
stand a ghost of a chance and I've been lying to my lawyers and
everybody else” has been his motto since birth.

Dr
Longdog Coleslaw is recommended by 'Dr' Betty Martini, 'Dr' Tullio
Simonichi, 'Dr' Stanislaw Brezinski and 'Dr' Rima Laibow, and her
husband General Lurch which should tell you all you need to know.

“Dr
L”, as he's known to his millions of fans,has received many letters
from his Member of Parliament, Diana Johnson MP, who said of him “I've
warned you before about contacting me. If you don't stop writing to
me immediately I will phone the police and get a restraining
order”.

“Dr L”, as he known to his billions of fans,
writes his biography in the third person because it makes it look
like somebody else thinks he's the dog's bollocks instead of him just
being a sad and lonely old oxygen thief who has to say nice things
about himself because nobody else will.

Doctor Coleslaw
retired from medical practice in January 2016 or retired from medical
practice at some indeterminate point in the past or has never
practised medicine at all in Hull depending on which bullshit story
he's telling at the time... Take ya pick.

Based
on in Germany still existing Hitler-laws (through the Hitler the
Jewish doctors of their titles and authorisation has deprived and it
is only in Germany) leads " Dr L ", as he lovingly of his
trillions of fans is called, his title and would not in Germany. He
wants only as a self-healing helpers to be seen! Just as a BDTPMS®
coach!... And of course he's not really a doctor anyway which is the
main reason why his fake credentials don't confer the title of
'Doctor' in Germany... Or indeed anywhere else.

On
18. January 2016, Dr. Coleslaw has decided, from his therapeutic
activity completely back to draw and has his fantasy medical license
in Hull not renewed.

Copyright
2016 all rights reserved! All the names and trademarks are legal
protection. Any unlawful use will be civil and criminal. BDTPMS®
Masters Society LLC, Hull.

Friday, 2 September 2016

Well it's The Freedom Festival in Hull this weekend so I'm taking a few days off to celebrate my adopted home-town's multi-racial, multi-faith, multi-cultural heritage with a lot of beer and a lot of good food.

But before I go...

In England we also have sayings...

"Be sure your sins will find you out" - The bible (I think).

"If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it's probably a duck" - Anon.

Thursday, 1 September 2016

Just a little update to my earlier post about the Dresden Dumpling's impotent rantings...

A quick play with Facebook's 'translate' function popped up these two gems...

First we have Leona (Lenny's 'fem' name) advising himself to have his critics kneecapped because it's cheaper than suing them...

Next we have this...

How many times have we heard Lenny claim his critics' days are numbered?.. Yeah... I lost count too but it's quite a few and all we ever get is idiotic lawsuits that wouldn't last five minutes in court even assuming his lawyers don't throw him under the bus in very short order...

Now... You see... The point is Lenny you can only sue people for libel if what they have said about you is false... That's where your cunning plan comes off the rails... You can hardly complain about people calling you a "Jew-hater" when you post rabidly anti-Semitic links on your public Facebook accounts... Can you fatso?

I have to admit I'm a tad curious as to what exactly "We're doing the
whole frame kampanie now a end Dave for dr c" means... I've deduced that "Verleumdungskampanie" should translate as "smear campaign" or "whispering campaign" but where the fuck does 'Dave' come from?

When read with "The cowards think if they under false names and post photos we find they don't. The wrong" which I think can be safely wrangled into real English as "The cowards think if they post under false names with false photos [of themselves] we won't find them. They are wrong"I'm going to make an intuitive link and assume that is directed at me, this blog and my Twitter feed...If that's true then here's a few little hints from me to Lenny which he can have free, gratis and for nothing (or €5000 for life membership) which will help him track me down so he can set his $70,000 'legal team' on me...

1. My name's not Dave... Hint... Six letters... Begins with 'M'... The same in German.

3. If your lawyers want to get in touch with me for a postal address the email address is on this page... But I know you're lazy so I'll repeat it... leonardnotwell[at]gmail.com

4. As I live in the UK if you want to sue lose to me you'll have to do it under the laws of England and Wales and you will need a British barrister or you can represent yourself. The address for the Queens Bench in London is...

5. One of the defences under English law is "truth" so good luck with that one.

6. According to The Defamation Act 2013"A statement is not defamatory unless its publication has caused or is likely to cause serious harm to the reputation of the claimant". That means I get to enquire into your finances. That should be very revealing... $42,000,000 to your 'foundations'? Butlers? Private jets? €1000 lunches? 'mega best selling author'? It also means you will have to show you actually have a reputation which is capable of being damaged... Good luck with that one too.

Now then... Now that we're clear on the fact that I'm actually double-daring-with-a-cherry-on-top you to sue me here's a little treat for you as I know how much you hate things on the internet which are false... Apart from things you post that is... Here's a real picture of me which you can repost anywhere you like...

I know you won't be able to resist telling lies about it like you've done with Connie, Bernie and Jason but you can have it all the same because I'm not hiding from you and never have been... You have ALWAYS been able to post a comment here... I won't censor you.

You have always been able to comment on my twitter feed too but you've chosen not to do that either and my email address has been on this page for the last six months but you've not used that either.

Hiding Coldwell? No pal... It's you that's hiding from the grubby truth that you are a liar, a fraud, a fake, a bigot, and a con-artist.

It seems this blog is rattling the cage of Never-Has-Been-And-Never-Will-Be-A-Doctor Leonard Coldwell so it's nice to know he reads it (or... judging by his execrable English language skills has it read to him)...

Well... I'm assuming that as Connie, Bernie or SD have been having a well deserved rest and not posted much over the summer it's this blog that has fuelled Lenny's important rage.

"For all the jealous people, stupid people and other losers: Full of pride we spit in your face:"

He then continues with another 1300 words of 'biography', self-aggrandisement, ludicrous, and contradictory, claims, figures pulled directly out of his arsehole and blatant lies...

And more whining about his enemies...

"...the
attacks are always without substance or evidence, based on lies:
'these people' even somewhere on the internet have placed under a
false name and then refer to etc. Never was a jealous people or paid
detractor any of his false accusations against Dr Leonard Coldwell,
prove it. There is not a single proof of the correctness of this
false accusations. The opponents of the natural health, create a
libellous websites full of lies and if the then be sued, simply do
under other false names on. They're all from the pharma or medicine
hired and paid or are just little jealous losers and losers."

To be honest I don't have the time to dissect his idiocy in depth at the moment but I'll try to get it done over the weekend and it's worth waiting for...

Call back soon for the full post or sign up to my Twitter feed. https://twitter.com/Coldwellwatch