Latest Journal Entry

my life shattered when my mother died. my mother was not the only one that i lost. my grandma is the only one i have left. if she goes, i have no one not even my bf. my life is to cold, dark and empty for emptiness. i don't need a heart. i need something that i never have before,... but don't know what it is. cause i never had itr before. i'm not the person who like to be alone. use to, not anymore. i'm just to old for loneliness and darkness. i need something filled. something to earse the hurt, loneiness and pain. i even lost a unborn child that i didn't know i had until i went to the doctor. life is so hurtful. its hell. its for the not the weak hearts. i don't belong here. not now...