How Human Handle Impression

“First impressions are the most lasting” is one of popular known idiom. People tend to remember the way you appear when you first meet them. Then you try to look and act your best when you meet someone for the first time. Joana spent two hours picking just the right clothes to wear before she went to her first meeting with production department. Everybody cares about their first impression on something they find valuable.

Impressions itself always direct you to what will you do next to this person. Bob the head of production department who listen Joana’s presentation keep Joana’s impression in his mind and give her the value of impression. When we meet individuals or groups for the first time, we mostly evaluate two metrics: trustworthiness and confidence. These two metrics are trying to answer the question, “Should I talk to this one for the second time?”

The answer for that question scales from negative to positive impression. “I never talk to you and even if you pass me at the market you must be a stranger” or “I’d like to invite you to the coffee shop and talking about anything all day”. This negative or positive feeling has nothing to do with you. You can only accept it.

Then how people keep the value of impression of yours?

The value of impression is a number from -100 to 100. The positive values make people loves talking to you and the opposite doesn’t. Bob’s value of impression of Joana is 30. It means Bob would like to talk to Joana if it’s important.

The first impression is the base value and it always a guessing number. While the time goes by after their business ended, Bob never talk to Joana because they have nothing important to discuss. Joana left the company and move to another city for two years. Bob’s first impression of Joana stopped in 30.

It’s important to know that Joana has her own value of impression. When Joana met Bob for the first time she thinks her value of impression is 50. But Bob gives her 30 because he doesn’t really know her.

And suddenly, they meet each other after two years. Now, Bob has Joana’s second “first impressions”.

Now, Joana’s value of impression can be still 50 or more or less. If she is more confidence, her value of impression rise up and makes Bob say “Hi Joana? How are you?” It means, I think she is changed now and I want to make sure if she has an upgrades or not. Or it means, Bob’s value of impression of Joana is now more than 30.

What have you got from this little story?

You have your own standard of impression (x) created by yourself and people around you has their own standard of impression about you (x’). Their very first (x’) comes from guessing that we know as “first impression”. The more you trustworthy and confidence the more value of (x’) is equal to (x).

Everybody changes. So does impressions. Whenever you are upgraded or lowered your own impression, you create the new (x). So the next (x) will be (x1). In general it will be (xi), while i is the number you changes.

People around you will be updated by your (xi) as (xi‘). Only your close-friends have the complete series of (xi‘) that equal to (xi). The rest can be miss-valued or incomplete. See the example illustration below.

You met your close friend at (x0) and other people at (x1). You can give your updated (xi‘) to other people or they request it from you. If (xi‘) > (xi), it’s good for you. And so on. Let imagine yourself.

That is what I think about handling impression. Who cares the exact value of impression. We are always guessing the number. And the most important is you pretend to fake it. What do you think? Do you agree with me?