Saturday, November 24, 2012

Walk the talk

Here's another
episode from Adi's diary about her husband...

Aditi hates
exercising, while her husband is a health freak. One day Agneya Reddy asked her
to join him for a leisurely walk. She eagerly did. No sooner they reached the nearby
park than he started jogging and forced her to follow suit.

She protested, cribbed,
and took at least 10 breaks and at last squatted down.

The rest is in her
own words...

*************************

The following
morning, after he left for work as I sat browsing the net and sipping coffee, I
heard the door bell ring.

Two deliverymen
with a huge parcel were requesting permission to walk in. “Sir asked to install
it in the TV room.”

I called up Agy.
His secretary Sharon answered the call. “Mr Agneya Reddy’s phone.”

“Can I speak to
him, please.”

“He’s in a meeting.
May I take a message.”

“Can you ask him to
call me back. It’s urgent. Aditi here.”

“O! Hello ma’am. He’s gone for a briefing
session, so he left his mobile with me. Hang on a sec, I’ll get him online.”

Within a minute, Agy
was online “Yes, Adi.”

“Some guys are here
with a …”

“Yeah, that’s for
you, my love.” And then I heard him say, “ Informed? Ok. I’m just there.”

“Hello..”

“Ah Adi, let them
install it in the TV room. I'll call you in 30 minutes. Love you.”

The deliveryman, I
discovered was given detailed instructions. He knew where exactly to install it
and what to be moved. He rearranged the entire room so that the treadmill was
facing the home theater system.

Half-an-hour later,
Agy called. “Treadmill installed?”

“They are at it.”

“Good. Now my girl
will exercise every day.”

“Did I ask you for
this.”

“You will never.
And getting you to jog outside is a herculean task. So I came up with the best
solution.”

“Very smart.”

“Thank you. I know
you are not happy. And it’s absolutely fine by me. Beginning today, my smart
girl will exercise for an hour. You will have no excuse because you can do it
at your convenience, watching your favourite programmes.”

“And if I don’t.” I
was pissed off by his persistence.

“No dinner.”

“And it’s absolutely
fine by me.” I mocked attempting to get his tone.

His laugh, even
over the phone can do wonders on me. “Well, my dear, it’s important you exercise.
And the least you can do is walk an hour.”

“I’ll do after you
come.”

“No. I’m having the
spare guest room upstairs transformed into an in-house gym. We’ll replace the
balcony wall with glass and that’ll give it a fantastic look, too. So once
that’s ready, we can work out together. Until then you will walk an hour every
day alone.” He said the last sentence slowly and deliberately.

“Hello…”

“What do you want.”
I snapped and I heard him chuckle again.

“Be ready by 7pm.
We’ll go out for dinner.”

“Bye.”

“Love you. Please
smile.”

“No. Bye.”

I was irritated by his
audacity. What the heck, whatever he thinks has to be done. No way. At
least today, he’s not having his way.

I decided to
prepare an elaborate dinner.

**************

By 6pm vegetarian
spring rolls; hot and sour soup; sesame chicken strips with sweet & sour
dip; mixed fried rice and noodles were ready. As I was setting the table, in
walked a beaming Agy.

“Not ready? Let's
go.”

“I’ve cooked an
elaborate spread. Freshen up and come fast.”

“As you say.”

A little later, he
was standing examining the table. “Wow! this is, indeed, elaborate Adi. I can’t
wait. Where do I start?”

“Soup first. Oops,
I’ll fetch the sauces,” I said and went into the kitchen as he picked up the
soup bowls. But when I returned he was not there.

“Where are you?”

“Gimme me a minute,
dear.” He shouted from the bedroom.

“Adi, come with
me,” he said taking me by the wrist after a while.

“Where? The soup
will cold, Agy.”

“That can be
reheated.”

Shit! He was leading
me to the TV room.

“First walk for an
hour and then dinner.” He said leaving me beside the treadmill and lowering
himself into the sofa. “I’ll keep you company.”

“I walked.”

“You did not.” He
said with a don’t-fool-me smirk and shaking his head.

“I did,” I gave him
a stern look.

“Well,” he crossed
his legs over and folded his hands, and continued, “if you don’t walk, we both
are going without dinner tonight. And I don’t want to do that because I’m eager
to taste my Adi’s dishes. I’m famished.”

“Let me play some
music for you. What would you like to hear.”

“I have no likes.
It’s always your likes and wants, right. Play whatever,” I snapped with a
sullen face.

He got up with a
what-will-I-do-with-you smile, lifted me onto the treadmill, timed it for
60minutes and kissed me. “Yep, here you go,” and pressed the start button. He returned
to the sofa and sat watching me.

An hour later,
dabbed in perspiration, I slumped on the sofa. He sat up to wipe my face and I
shrugged him off.

I ate in silence,
while he was his chirpy best.

************************

Back in the
bedroom, the anger in me crept up, seeing him lying on the bed reading a book.
“How did you know about my walking.”

“I know it all,” he
said flashing his naughty smile.

It should be her.
I walked out quietly and knocked at our maid's door. The moment she opened the
door, I snapped, “From when did you start reporting my matters to Agy.” She
gave me a perplexed look. “I don’t like this.” I spat and returned to the
bedroom.

“Feeling better after taking it out on that
poor woman," he asked as I climbed over.

How does he know it
always! "I'd gone to take
my lens," I muttered.

I saw him smirk and
pick up his mobile. He dialled a number and put it on speaker between us. I
heard Savitri’s voice on the second ring. “Yes, Sir.”

“Savitri, Adi is
feeling bad about her behaviour just now. She wants to apologise…”

“…No sir, no, no.
No problem. She’s a small girl, sir. No problem.”

“Thanks Savitri.
Good night.”

I was fuming. “What
the heck? I’m a small girl, eh. Small girl!”

“Well, you behave
like one.” He said calm and composed.

“My foot I’ll
apologise. You ask her to spy on me, so cheap.”

Clearly amused by
my outburst, “You are such a kid, Adi. How closely have you observed this home,
umm”.

He sat back looking
at me, enjoying himself, as I was fuming with a mixed bag of emotions.

“Our home is webbed.”
With that same soft look, he continued, “Each room has a camera…”

I was all alert. How did I not notice it all this while!

“…Before you came,
I hardly spent time in here. So for security reasons, I had them installed.”

He paused. Then
with a cheeky smile, added, “It came in handy only today, though...”