Sesame Street To Introduce A New Character In Honor Of Mitt Romney — 'Big Oil'

Wednesday night at the first presidential debate, Republican nominee Mitt Romney promised to end public financing of America’s largest classroom — PBS. “I’m going to stop the subsidy to PBS. I’m going to stop other things,” the ex-governor said. “I like PBS, I love Big Bird.”

Critics immediately seized on Romney’s comments, pointing out that the former CEO of Bain Capital was already thinking about the imaginary characters he would fire as president. Some suggested that Romney should merely outsource Big Bird to China, where using Bain’s market expertise, he could find child laborers to emulate Big Bird at a fraction of current costs.

PBS — an organization familiar with Republicans calling for its defunding — seized the opportunity to defend its efforts. “The federal investment in public broadcasting equals about one one-hundredth of one percent of the federal budget,” the organization said in a statement. “Elimination of funding would have virtually no impact on the nation’s debt. Yet the loss to the American public would be devastating.”

The statement went on to explain that PBS understands Mr. Romney’s concerns and wishes to appeal to all Americans with its programming.

“This is why we are proud to announce the newest member of the Sesame Street family — ‘Big Oil’.”