Mike Petke survives a "volcnado"

"It wasn't you, baby it was meMaybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seemsMaybe that's what happens when a tornado meets a volcano"

Eminem (feat. Rihanna) - "Love the way you lie"

Games between New York Red Bulls and D.C. United can be fraught affairs at the best of times, but this is not the best of times for either team. D.C. are anchored to the bottom of the East, their season hinging on next month's US Open Cup final against Shield leaders RSL. New York meanwhile, have had a wretched month, that reached its nadir in last week's defeat on the road to Chivas USA. But a game that produced three goals, a red card and a saved penalty certainly had its moments, though arguably the biggest moment occurred before a ball had been kicked. As the teams prepared to walk out onto the field, Thierry Henry slowly walked out of the tunnel ahead of them and round to the New York bench. His erstwhile strike partner Fabian Espindola had had a torrid time in front of goal in LA the previous week and there'd been little surprise when he'd been replaced by Bradley Wright-Phillips in the starting line up. But despite a couple of shanked shots of his own the previous week, the thought that Henry might not start a game against the Red Bulls' main rivals had seemed unthinkable even earlier in the week.

But there was the team sheet to confirm it, and of course there was instant intrigue. In a fraught week since the Chivas game, Petke and Henry had had a heated altercation during Thursday's training session and had to be separated. After the game Petke was playfully evasive with the press as to whether we should read any connection to that incident into his decision, noting that he and Henry are like "a volcano" and "a tornado" (hence the Eminem reference, and perhaps also explaining Petke's hair during his playing days), while claiming that after the incident he and the player had spoken for two hours and cleared the air.

The air was pretty sulphorous again by the end of the game against D.C. — Petke and his D.C. counterpart Ben Olsen had started the game with smiles and hugs and ended it cursing at each other from their respective technical boxes, as a typically intense rivalry game boiled over. New York won 2-1, partly thanks to a breakout performance and goal from Lloyd Sam on the wing, and a goal from the captain (in the absence of Henry) Tim Cahill, who afterwards confessed to not sleeping the night before due to the fact his 10 year old son Kyah was singing the pre-game anthem. They also had Luis Robles to thank — the goalkeeper saved De Rosario's penalty after Sekagya had given one up for the second successive week (earning a red card in the process).

Amid all this incident though, the eventual introduction of Henry still attracted the most attention. When Cahill came off with an ankle injury that will keep him out of the forthcoming international week, his replacement swiftly had a chance to make a point to his coach — cantering into space on the left and cutting inside, only to fire his shot just past the post. Another even better chance for Henry went begging late on, by which time he'd been booked — his main contribution to the stat sheet on the night. By the end of the match and a tough week of post-Chivas introspection, the first year coach had just about made his point to what will soon be the last year veteran. Had it backfired (and the coach must have watched the DeRo penalty through his fingers) the coach's authority over what would have become a team in crisis might have come under real duress. As it is, he got out of the game with the winless streak over and with his side joint top of the East. GP

Real Salt Lake, Portland's love affair continues

For the league's 17 other teams, the rhetoric around Real Salt Lake and Portland should be a little off-putting. Between U.S. Open Cup and MLS play, those two have met three times in the past 25 days, each time using the run-up to embolden a type of mutual admiration society. I loved watching RSL play when I was at Akron, Caleb Porter might say, while Jason Kreis might counter by calling the Timbers the team that plays most like his – praise so effusive you couldn't help see the implication: We play beautifully; others don't; it's so nice facing an opponent that does it right.

That attitude may have come back to bite Porter on Friday night, though, with the Timbers boss employing a bit of a gambit in response to absences that left him without two key midfielders to protect fourth and fifth choice center backs. Instead of going conservative, using whatever means necessary to protect the four-man line he'd patch together, Porter played six in the middle and three at the back, essentially scrawling "WHY NOT" across the whiteboard before walking out on the field.

Against the league's best attack, Porter's gambit snapped in eight minutes. Real Salt Lake paused for a moment, made an adjustment, then (in the ninth minute) put Luis Gil on goal. Taking advantage of space vacated by left-center back Michael Harrington, Gil beat Rodney Wallace to go in alone for the opener, a lead that was doubled six minutes later by Joao Plata.

Portland did cut the league in half through Darlington Nagbe shortly after, but a straight red to Ben Zemanski just before halftime seemed to seal their fate. If there was any doubt, though, Javier Morales's second half acrobatics addressed it:

A late exchange of goals left it 4-2, a result that leaves RSL on a league-leading 48 points. Their 52 goals, already a franchise record, are nine more than the league's second-best attack. Right now, there's little question who is the league's best team.

As for the aesthetics, the game truly was more entertaining than your usual fare – a repeat of the team's two previous meetings. Though there is something unsettling about the teams' glad-handing, to a certain extent it's true. Amid the stylistic homogeneity MLS has had for most of its history, RSL and Portland represent something different. Just ask them. RF

Schmid returns to Columbus with an embarrassment of riches

At one time Sigi Schmid was the coach at Columbus Crew. His team played in the first dedicated soccer stadium in MLS, and with the aid of Guillermo Barros Schelotto he won the Supporters Shield and then the MLS Cup in 2008. After he left for Seattle, things were never quite the same again for either party. Despite heading the side whose crowds energized the league at the end of the last decade, Schmid has famously failed to get his new side beyond the conference final in the playoffs, while Columbus inexorably lost traction in the East — a couple of Conference semi-finals in the wake of Schmid's departure were followed by a Wild Card elimination in 2011, and last season, despite a Higuain and Arrieta inspired late season surge, they missed out on the playoffs entirely. The recent Anthony Precourt acquisition of the club has come at a time when the original stadium has begun to look a little shabby — in some ways reflecting the indifferent onfield fortunes of one of the MLS originals. Precourt believes the Ohio sports market is ripe for the club to thrive and has vowed improvements, but Saturday's 1-0 loss to a ten man Seattle and every team above them in the East picking up at least a point, means that Columbus may be joining the also-rans of Toronto and DC United sooner rather than later this season, and any improvements may be deferred until at least the off-season.

Schmid on the other hand finds himself helming a side who have finally started their charge up the Western table in earnest. They're eight points behind Supporters Shield leaders Real Salt Lake, but two wins and two draws from their four games in hand would draw them level — hardly daunting. They came to Columbus fresh off 67,000 watching them beat Portland last week, and with their fans having earned an endorsement from US Soccer to help organize and rally the US support for the vital qualifier against Mexico...taking place in Columbus. Add in Schmid's trio of designated players in Rosales, Martins and of course Dempsey and when we talk about him returning to Columbus, we're also talking about him arriving with an embarrassment of riches.

Yet there was also some embarrassment from those riches when Eddie Johnson, the former Fulham man who is conspicuously not a designated player, scored the only goal of the game. Johnson, who has watched the recent expensive arrivals at the club with interest, while continuing to be the Sounders main threat in front of goal, jogged to the touchline camera miming rubbing a billfold and mouthing "Pay me" repeatedly. Johnson wants a new contract and has noted that Seattle are prepared to splash the cash for the right man.

Seattle of course are famously maxed out on DPs — Shalrie Joseph's contract had to be re-negotiated in order to land Dempsey and while Rosales looks to be the most vulnerable given a slight drop off in productivity this year, he's still capable of the type of dead balls to Johnson that brought the winners against Portland and now Columbus. If Johnson keeps scoring and keeps demanding though, it's a potential headache for Schmid and majority owner Joe Roth. Columbus fans watching their teams fall to a fifth defeat in seven games, and with their own DP weapon Higuain sidelined through suspension, will have little sympathy. To them their former coach's looming dilemma looks like what it is — a luxury problem.

Once again, Landon Donovan opts to stay home

It says a lot about a player's stature when a teammate's double can't steal his thunder, though to Robbie Keane's credit, he came close. The Galaxy captain's two goals and an assist in Saturday's 3-0 win over San Jose was preeminent in the post match reports, but when looking back on the week that was in Southern California soccer, it will still be Landon Donovan's week.

To his credit, Donovan did contribute on the field, a nicely finished opener on a breakaway served by Keane, but the major news came away from the pitch. On Wednesday, Donovan extended his contract with LA, a multi-year deal that ended mounting (if muted) speculation he'd take another crack overseas. On Thursday, Donovan's big week was capped by a recall to the U.S. Men's National Team, with the player set to return to World Cup Qualifying action for the first time since June 2012.

After a brilliant Gold Cup, the recall was expected. And to a certain extent, the contract extension was, too, though given the mercurial nature of Donovan's 2013, a move away from MLS wasn't completely out of the question. Recent statements that he was more open to other offers fueled talk he might leave. Perhaps that was a bluff, an increasingly puckish Donovan allowing a more mischievous thought to spin people's minds. To him, a return to Los Angeles may have always been the most likely scenario, so much so that he didn't mind teasing alternatives in public.

Donovan's new contract is already being touted as a coup for the league, coupling with Clint Dempsey's arrival as a statement of MLS's new strength. But as with anything Landon Donovan, things become misleading the more you read into them. Just as Donovan's returns to MLS from Germany weren't entirely him sacrificing European stardom for the good of the league, Wednesday's announcement didn't reflect MLS's ability to go toe-to-toe with foreign suitors and retain one of their prized assets. Perhaps MLS can now do that, but Donovan's situation isn't a good example.

Instead, Donovan's is a very special, isolated case. He's always stayed closer to MLS because unlike Dempsey, Michael Bradley, or Jozy Altidore, his personal reasons make him more predisposed to do so. And with Wednesday's announcement, Donovan's made the personal decision to finish his career where he's happiest: with LA. RF

The move to Chivas USA was billed as a chance for him to lead an attack, but nobody was in any doubt that this was a step backwards for the one-time wunderkind as the Red Bulls traded for Heath Pearce — and despite some honest if frustrating endeavor at a struggling team, the sense was that Agudelo was maybe going to be another one that got away.

He still could be — the jury is still out on Brek Shea, so there's a blueprint that tells us that Agudelo's impending move to Stoke represents an opportunity rather than a coronation. But the turnaround in fortunes for Agudelo is testimony both to his own persistence, even when in exile at a Chivas team living in perpetual crisis, and perhaps most pertinently since his arrival among Jay Heaps' crop of confident youngsters at New England.

Heaps has had to affect a turnaround of his own of course — New England had had a drift of their own in the later Steve Nicol years, and Heaps' painstaking attempt to put some defensive steel in what had become a perenially flaky team, initially looked to be taking two steps back for every step forward. But a defensive platform has slowly become established that has allowed the likes of Nguyen, Rowe, Fagundez, and yes, the recent addition of Agudelo, to express themselves going forward.

Not every game is the type of breakout hammering they dished out to Philadelphia last week, but the confidence of the team is on a definite upwards trajectory and they remain in and around the playoff places — with a special credit going to Agudelo's six goals in seven appearances. And while it turns out Agudelo is just passing through New England, he's done enough that the Revs have considered it worth holding on to him until the end of the season, when they could have had at least the split of a fee had the player gone to Stoke in this window (Chivas and New York would also have benefited, which may have swayed the Revs' decision).

In an ill-tempered game against Toronto on Friday night, Agudelo was right in the fray — picking up a nasty head cut in a clash with Doneil Henry and continuing to battle with the Toronto defense for most of the night. In doing so he did a lot of unglamorous hold up play, and took a fair share of knocks before being replaced by Saer Sene with ten minutes to go. When people look back on Agudelo's cameo with the Revs this season they'll maybe think of moments like his audacious backheel goal against Chicago a couple of weeks ago, and file it alongside those flashes of skill from two or three years ago in his highlight reel, but when they think about what his future might be, the less spectacular but more significant indicator of an upward trajectory has come with his increasing willingness to work for his team. GP