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Tyler Perry Creates Two New Shows For The Oprah Winfrey Network

Either you’re blissfully unaware of Tyler Perry, or you know exactly who he is and avoid him at all costs. Granted, if none of those options describe you, you’re a lover of a director who continually insults the intelligence of his audience and/or movies in which a man dresses up as a woman and is obnoxious about it.

And whilst you can find Tyler Perry, Hollywood’s highest-paid actor/director/whatever, currently bringing nothing to the latest Alex Cross adaptation, Alex Cross, he’s just signed a deal with The Oprah Winfrey Network to bring two new shows to the air next year. Because, yes, it’d be highly unlike Tyler Perry to create just one show at a time!

The first, complete with obligatory “Tyler Perry” tag (something I only thought John Carpenter could get away with), is called Tyler Perry’s Love Thy Neighbor, and is set in “Love’s Diner, where every day the menu serves up good food, great laughs, valuable life lessons, and a whole lot of [Tyler Perry’s] love for its zany neighbors.” Zany neighbors, of course, refers to characters you’ll dislike instantly because of their highly detestable personalities and annoying quirks, all of which Tyler Perry thinks are charming.

The second show happens to be a drama titled Tyler Perry’sThe Haves And The Have Nots and will apparently examine the “obstacles and secrets” shared by two families, the rich and pompous Cryers and the much poorer relations of their housekeeper, a character who Perry will presumably ask us to relate to, as both clans are brought together to learn about what is right and what is wrong, and how rich and poor doesn’t necessarily mean you have to act like a jerk. The results, we expect, will be as ham-fisted as the title of the show.

Both shows are set to air sometime in mid-2013, although hopefully this news has spurred you into moving to Alaska and starting life anew. Hurry, whilst you still have time.