Archive for April 7th, 2005

- The dogs get me up around 6:55. I let ‘em out, take a leak, then climb back into bed.

- I awake, again, at 9:30, to the sound of wife and child puttering about the room. Wife’s trying to convince child that going to school today would be in her best interest. Child’s stalling. I sit up and wish the taller of the two a Happy Birthday. Wife takes child to get dressed for school, and I take morning shit.

- With child off, wife and I sit around and play catch-up from last night. We then decide how we’re gonna celebrate her 34th Birthday. We cuddle for awhile, and then talk about where to eat breakfast. Like every pampered Hollywood wife, Jen opts for Quizno’s. Ever the love-slave, I head off to hunt and gather. Like a good caveman, I bring the dogs with me.

- On the way to Quizno’s, I go a few miles out of my way to Moe’s on Melrose to get Schwalbach 34 multi-colored roses, as well as some gardenias to float in bowls of water around the room (she loves that) and some flowers for her Mom (without whom there is no birthday girl). I then head to Quizno’s, and stop at Wendy’s for burgers for the Muttlies.

- On the way home, I call Jenno and tell her I’m in, but I think she’s crazy for thinking I could pull this off, when this town’s lousy with real actors. She tells me I’ll be meeting with the director on Monday.

- I get home, dump the booty on the respective booty-getters, and settle in in front of the TiVo to eat my low-carb Steakhouse Beef Dip wrap and dig into a little low-carb ice cream. We opt for “Dirty War”, an HBO movie on DVD about a dirty bomb going off in London that I picked up the other day.

- Before we know it, it’s three, and Harley’s home. Jen and Harley bomb around for awhile, and I try to get through the now-300 emails that’re sitting in my in-box.

- Suddenly, Harley decides it’s present time. We head to the kitchen, where Byron, Gail, and Harley’s gifts are all spread out. Jen unwraps and coos, and Quinnster and I fight about who gets to keep the boxes (I like to wind the kid up sometimes). Following that, dinner is served: lasagna for the Birthday Girl and family, bun-less cheeseburgers for me. Harley makes us go around the table, stating our name, age, and a memory of our favorite birthday. It’s moments like this, I realize, that I’m really gonna miss in twenty years.

- Post dinner, the candles are lit, and the Birthday Girl has at it. While the other four dig into what looks like just the flat-out best Duncan Hines cake ever made, I putter, trying not to think about all that sugar I’m missing out on. Quinnster and I adjourn to the living room to play some Tetris until it’s time for her to go to bed.

- I rendezvous with Schwalbach in our bedroom, and we go over the three scenes I’ll be reading with Susanah on Monday. Immediately, I feel like a total fraud, but Jen seems into my horrible little performance. We go through the scenes for an hour, until I retire to the bed, where I fight with the room’s wifi for a decent connection. Around 10:20, mid-TiVo’ed “Law & Order”, I fall asleep. Jen wakes me up and hour later to say g’night and climb into bed beside me. It wasn’t the best birthday in the world, but considering we did exactly what she wanted, it wasn’t the worst either.