The phone buzzed annoyingly at my work desk. I suggested to my colleague seated next to me that she pick it up because the likelihood of it being for me was slim.

To my surprise, five seconds into her telephone conversation she handed me the receiver, “There’s a Max wishing to speak to you.”

Max is quite the distinctive name. There are not that many famous people with the moniker, unless you consider the American Max Factor of the cosmetics company. My head quickly reeled through the people I know and the only one who I could safely assume was on the other end was fellow wine industry person, wine writer and mandolin virtuoso, Max Allen.

Two weeks ago I returned home from work and stuck my hand in the typically empty mailbox. Today was unlike every other day as there in the cold steel box lay the latest copy of Australia’s Wine Business Magazine (WBM). I threw it onto the dining table, made myself a cup of tea and began to flick through its pages.

A couple of months prior, WBM had put a little spiel by an unnamed wine blogger in their weekly e-newsletter called The Week That Was (TWTW). At the end of the piece they suggested to any other wine bloggers out there that they too should send in their story. A few days later I submitted a little piece about the La Donna del Vino blog to the magazine. The editor, Anthony Madigan, was in touch a couple of weeks later to request some photos as he may print it in the upcoming TWTW or the WBM. I was not holding my breath and the subsequent e-newsletters and magazine released immediately after did not contain the piece. As you can then imagine with this following issue, I was not expecting to be flicking through and stumble across this little tidbit on page 52 in the all-important Social Media section. I didn’t exactly squeal, but I did choke back a little gasp.

Why ruin a good glass of fizz with orange juice? Just serve half a glass on its own, and leave the OJ to those who really need the taste. Same goes for Midori and bubbly. Eeek!

2. Having ice with white wine

Not even on the hottest of days is this allowed – unless the wine is under $5. It ruins the taste and looks stupid. Sink your feet into an ice bucket if it’s that hot, and sink your palate into the real flavours of the wine. Spritzers excepted.

3. Sparkling v champagne

Champagne is the bubbly that comes from the region of Champagne only, in France. That $12 bottle of Jacobs Creek is not.

4. Red wine with lemonade/coke/water

The only people allowed to do this are Italians – usually with their own home brew because it was made in 1986 and there’s still heaps of flagons in the shed.

5. Pouring a bottle straight away

Wine is full of rich, complex intense flavours. You need to let it breathe/decant before it’s at its optimum. I don’t need to explain the concept of foreplay here, but it’s the same thing essentially.

6. Hibiscus flowers and strawberries

Sure it looks fancy mixed with bubbly at those B-list parties but, c’mon… They go to waste and then we’re left to dispose of them on the floor when no one’s looking.

7. Small wine glasses

We’ve come a long way in recent times in realising that wine evolves better and quicker in bigger glasses (see point five). But some restaurateurs still insist on serving top-notch wine in those archaic, shapeless 200ml things. Open up!

8. Drinking wine too cold

The colder your white wine, the less flavour it will impart on your palate. Most whites are drunk way too cold. The more expensive whites should be taken out of the fridge and drunk about 15 minutes later. Try it – you’ll find the flavours are more robust. The same rule can apply for heavily-flavoured, Belgian-style beers.

9. Cheap New Zealand sauvignon blanc

There’s such an over-supply of this NZ grape, particularly from the Marlborough region, that people are confusing good value with good wine. If you really want to try a cracking sauvignon blanc from NZ, give the Cloudy Bay Te Koko a ride. Then try going back to drink that $15 crap.

10. Being scared

It might seem unnatural, but swirling and sniffing your wine (in a big glass) will make the experience of drinking it doubly enjoyable. Get into it, don’t worry about looking like a wine snob. Or of spilling some on your clothes. Embrace what’s in your glass and let it fly open to your senses.

Friends

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