Allan and Barbara Pease made a list of the most common top 5 “new relationship” mistakes in their book “Why Men Want Sex, and Women Need Love” which I can relate to because at some time of my life, I have made these mistakes when starting a new relationship. So out of theory and out of experience, I would like to tell you about these mistakes. You’d better detect them and deal with them.

Here is the list:

1. Denial of problems:
You often recognize a lot of serious problems that put a risk into your relationship. But, unfortunately, you choose to ignore them. Each person has a positive and a negative side, but sometimes the negatives are a fatal factor. When choosing your partner look at both sides, and always act smart to make a considerate choice regarding him.

2. Making hormonal choices:
When meeting someone and you feel a charm giving you a magnetic feeling, I advise you to take a cold shower and read this. Never commit to someone because you feel you’re madly in love or because you are in a drug like state. Never. Watch out before you make any decision based on a temporary unstable feeling because your hormones are talking to you. Put your hormones on hold and think out of them.

3. Choosing needy people:
Always look for someone who wants to be with you rather than just having a need to be with you. A needy partner gets you tired, and the soonest possible, you’ll find a way to run away.

4. Picking a partner who you think you can change:
Whenever I hear “you think you can change him” I laugh at myself. Seriously. I can relate to this all the time. So here, I will tell you, out of experience and out of theory, it will never happen. And yes even the magical power of love will fail to change him. He is who he is…today, tomorrow, and always!

5. Being compliant:
You make a real big effort not to indulge in any conflict or disagreement with your partner. You become a yes person who is ready to compromise so that you won’t upset him. No. this is not the case. No man wants a passive compliant woman. Be yourself, and be strong enough to handle any argument. Keep in mind, arguments and conflicts are the basic elements of a strong bond. They shape your relationship.

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