This tutorial will clear up some confusion, and offer some guidance about how to eliminate this problem from your writing.

3Why Writers Write Awkwardly

Because while composing the essay, the writer is normally focusing on the content of the sentence, not its structure, he or she may not notice a lack of sentence unity.

During the proofreading stage, the writer may still not catch the problem, because instead of reading the sentence the way it is actually written, the writer may instead hear the thought as separate components, each of which is clear.

4What Makes Sentences Awkward?

Awkward sentences are ungrammatical, unclear, choppy, or just too difficult to follow.

The awkward sentence is where grammar and style collide.

If your sentence does not sound right when you read it aloud, chances are that it has run away from you. You are trying to say too much in one sentence. Simplify the thought and rewrite it. If necessary, use two sentences.

5Problems found in awkward sentences

Unwarranted tense shifts

Shifts in person. For the most part, keep your sentences in the third person (he, she, it, they) avoid using first person (I, me, we) and second person (you, your).

Faulty prediction (is how, is why, is what, is where, is when)

Example Anorexia is where people, believing they are too fat, diet to the point of starvation.

Mixed Constructions

6Problems Mixed Constructions

Many awkward sentences are mixed constructions. Mixed constructions are pieces of good sentences that are badly mixed in one sentence. To fix them, draw a line where the sentence seems to go wrong, keep the best part, delete the other, and finish the idea.

Example For most people who have cataracts/ increase their danger from being blinded by glare from headlights while driving at night.

Solution For most people who have cataracts, driving at night is dangerous because of the glare from headlights.

7The Causes of Awkward Sentences

Not using your own words instead you rely on the phrases and constructions of the author you are discussing. The mixture of your authors style and your own is almost always awkward.

Not revising most writers produce awkward sentences on the first draft.

Sentences become awkward through a combination of structural flaws, wordiness and incorrect usage.

8Structural Flaws

A sentence that combines two or more segments in a confusing or inaccurate manner normally contains structural flaws.

Example He had great runs that year, which was (115) along with strike outs (99).

Problems nonsensical phrasing, improper use of parentheses

Suggested Correction That year, he scored an impressive 115 runs although he struck out 99 times.

9Wordiness

Sentences contain too many unnecessary words.

Example He was the Mets manager during their first world series, Hodges guided them to the Mets first World Series.

Grammatical problem a comma splice separates two clauses which mean essentially the same thing

Suggested Solution As a manager, Hodges guided the Mets to their first World Series.

10Incorrect Usage

Any sentence that does not have sentence unity.

Example He was black so because blacks were not liked very much and as much as Atticus tried to get him accused of being not guilty, he still ended up being accused of the crime.

Suggested Correction Since he was black, and since blacks were usually mistreated, he was still accused of the crime despite Atticus efforts to exonerate him.

11Avoiding Awkward Sentences

Because there are thousands of ways to combine phrases and clauses, there can be no single rule to help writers avoid awkward sentences.

You can probably avoid most examples of them if you proofread the paper and re-write any sentence that seems to get away from you or that you have trouble composing.

Learn to spot problem phrasing in the first place, and think about how you can better express yourself. This takes practice.

12Detecting Awkward Sentences

Read your essay aloud slowly with pen in hand. Mark areas where you slowed, stumbled, or paused, because those areas may need fixing. Your ear may know what your eye has missed.

To really be sure you have not missed an awkward sentence, proofread your essay back to front last sentence to first sentence.

13Awkward sentences do not reflect the writers intended meaning.

Ex. In this quote, it interprets an example of when Tom Robinson was killed.

Correction The quotation calls to mind the killing of Tom Robinson as an example of its meaning.

Ex. Tom Robinson is a poor black man who is discriminated against.

Correction Tom Robinson is a poor black man who faces discrimination.

14Correcting Awkward Sentences Stylistically

Look for the words it, this, by, and there in each sentence. Are these words truly necessary? Could you rewrite the sentence to replace them with more specific words or eliminate them entirely?

Consider each comma in the sentence. Does it belong there?

15Correcting Awkward Sentences Grammatically

Use correct parallel structure

Correct misplaced modifiers

Write clear, concise sentences

16Correct Parallel Structure means

Sentences have the same structures on either side of a conjunction (and, but not, so, yet, for etc.)

Awkward Sentence These advertisements persuade us that the corporation supports environmentalism but not to buy its products.

Suggested Correction These advertisements persuade us that the corporation supports environmentalism but not that we should buy its products.

17Correct Parallel Structure means

Items in a list must be parallel in structure.

Awkward Sentence Gordons career goals include a promotion to Vice President, an annual bonus of 10, and to have many exciting and stimulating projects to choose from.

Suggested Correction Gordons career goals include a promotion to Vice President, an annual bonus of 10, and a choice of many exciting and stimulating projects.

18Correct Parallel Structure means

Sentences have equality between items that are being compared

Awkward Sentence I think dining out is a lot more fun than to go through the hassle of cooking at home.

Suggested Correction I think dining out is a lot more fun than going through the hassle of cooking at home.

19Correct Misplaced Modifiers

When using a phrase or clause to modify or describe something in a sentence, the modifier must refer clearly to what it is describing. Most often, this means it must be placed next to the item to which it is referring. Failing to do so often results in an awkward, though humorous, sentence.

20Correcting Misplaced Modifiers

Awkward Sentence The despondent little girl found her missing doll playing in the backyard under the swing.

Suggested Correction When she was playing in the backyard under the swing, the little girl found her missing doll.

21Writing Clear, Concise Sentences means

Using strong, precise verbs whenever possible avoid passive constructions like it is believed by it was demonstrated that..

Avoiding unnecessarily inflated words and phrases like under circumstances in which instead of when

Eliminating unnecessary prepositional phrases like the opinion of the working group instead of the working groups opinion

22Writing Clear, Concise Sentences means

Avoiding the use of vague, all-purpose nouns

Avoiding strings of nouns like program implementation process evaluation

Avoiding expletive constructions like it is, there is, there are whenever possible

23Examples of Awkward Sentences

Every attempt will be made to delineate the problems of education among underdeveloped nations and how coordinated efforts can address them in economical ways.

The proposal appears to have been written intelligently, carefully, and with the full cooperation of all the involved agencies.

A familiar marketing strategy was reintroduced by a former client that had served the company dependably in the past.

The committee recommends revising the curriculum to reflect trends in local employment and that the division be reorganized to reflect the new curriculum.

To run for a seat in the United States Senate, a candidate must be an adult at least thirty years of age, a citizen of the United States, and is to reside in the state to be represented.

24Examples of Awkward Sentence

An historical study of any profound social change must recognize the economic basis of the change and its political climate and its demographic foundations.

Nineteenth-century nihilists were concerned with neither the origins of philosophical thought nor how societal laws developed.

After practicing for months, auditions went much more smoothly for the young actor.

The great wastes of the southeast quadrant of Saudi Arabia are at once forbiddingly empty, climactically harsh, and the beauty of them is haunting.

Like many politicians, the senators promises sounded good but ultimately led to nothing.

Hodges was a strong player, he had good sportsmanship, he also contributed to the game.

25Examples of Awkward Sentences

This shows that even by Boo being used to staying by himself and not being bothered he went out to save the kids even though they tried to bother and disturb him.

For King Lear, because of the one fault he makes, he pays for it dearly.

Besides that of her parents, it is not until Jane arrives at Lowood that she experiences love.

Cocteau seems to almost ridicule, in the process, the Greek belief in nobility.

She has no reason to grieve in sorrow when she has no one to blame but herself.

Based on the fact that he is pessimistic and feels life is not worth it, he is forgetting about his loved ones whom he said he did not want to hurt.

26Examples of Awkward Sentences

Though he is trying to argue that they do not have the right to say he cannot choose if he wants euthanasia, he does not have the right to tell his family they have suffered enough.

For example, people sometimes get so angry that they would like to take someone elses life and murder them.

After reading this statement, I interpreted that civil rights and the hiring policy should not be taken in the consideration for the hiring of homosexuals.

Well, all the civil rights cases concerning African Americans were based on allowing blacks to become part of the modern lifestyle.

Many men were taught that this was not masculine of them.

27Examples of Awkward Sentences

For example, a person who has many problems, such as financial issues, cant exactly practice euthanasia.

People make choices every day that put their lives in jeopardy where death can occur.

Everyone portrays a unique situation and no religion or law can say what is appropriate for every woman.

To take the side that they did the writers of this article should have given better solutions to these very serious problems.

This statement is not very influential because the author fails to provide any supporting evidence.

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