June, 2012

Of course 10th Planet Jiu Jitsu founder and instructor Eddie Bravo couldn’t do an old-fashioned belt ceremony when he awarded his long-time friend and student Joe Rogan his black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu earlier this week. As you’ll see in the video above, Bravo plays all coy before making a surprise announcement that our favorite stand-up comic, UFC commentator, and donkey semen drinking cheerleader has been promoted to black belt after class on Tuesday night.

Rogan — rocking a rash-guard and grappling tights because he’s that serious — is moved to tears by the promotion. Rogan has done more for promoting Jiu Jitsu and mixed martial arts than he is usually given credit for, and Bravo speaks to this. But the teacher also says that he waited so long to give him a black belt (Rogan had been a brown belt for eight years) because he wanted to make sure Joe was legit and had gotten his mat time in. Besides, Joe already had another black belt to hold his pants up.

The video is sweet and heartwarming, for those into that kind of thing, but it turns straight poetic and slow-clap-worthy once Rogan is given the floor and addresses his teammates. “This is seriously one of the proudest moments of my life,” Rogan said.

“Out of all the shit I’ve done in my life…becoming really good at jiu jitsu is probably one of the most difficult things a person can do and I think it helps me with everything I do. I think the more I train and the more I meet people who are in jiu jitsu…people who are in jiu jitsu and train on a regular basis, they’re healthier people. Their egos are healthier. Especially men. They’re easier to talk to. They’re easier to hang out with. Because they’re facing reality on a regular basis.

Basically, the “ad” is nothing more than the “Oregon Gangster” riffing on prison politics and how awesome he is for just under a minute. He not once mentions the product at hand, or even how it works, but that kind of frivolous information is best left for the puny-brained weaklings who think that a few push-ups a day will transform them into the next Ultimate Fighter. So goes the reasoning of Chael P. Sonnen.

Following up our presentation of Anderson Silva vs. Chael Sonnen 1, here’s the other UFC fight where Anderson Silva looked less-than-invincible, at least momentarily. This was Silva’s third middleweight title defense, back at UFC 82 in March 2008, and Dan Henderson dominated the opening round, taking Silva down about two minutes into the fight and grinding down on him with punches for the rest of the frame. Henderson also puts a good deal of effort into covering Silva’s mouth and nose with his hand, a cheap breathing-obstruction trick that occasionally bleeds into gouging/fish-hooking territory. (Side note: Skip to the 14:07 mark, and you’ll see the rough draft of the front kick that Silva used to dummy up Vitor Belfort.)

Silva got even in the second round, brawling a bit with Hendo before letting his precision striking take over. At the 21:16 mark, Silva nails Henderson with a knee, kick, and punches that the challenger is never able to recover from. Silva gets on top of Henderson and works his jiu-jitsu until he sinks a particularly nasty rear-naked choke. After the fight, Silva takes a moment to explain that Henderson was good, but he’s no Rich Franklin. A real…class act? Anyway, the Ohio fans loved it.

After the jump: Silva’s UFC 134 title defense against Yushin Okami, which also ended violently in the second round.

We’re going to come right out and say it: By no means should you watch this entire video. We know that your time is precious, Potato Nation, as you are all, like us, the head honchos of your respective trades. But on the off chance that any of you have had a shit day and are in need of a pick-me-up, maybe, just maybe, you’ll get some enjoyment out of seeing a little street justice. This video, shot by one of the many onlookers, captures Devin Crime (or as the crowd referred to him “white boy”), a BJJ purple belt and Judo brown belt, coming to the aid of a woman who was apparently being struck by the Floyd Mayweather fan doing battle with Devin in said video. And by doing battle, we mean being choked until he taps like a little bitch on two separate occasions.

The video begins after this first takedown has already been landed, and even though Devin displays some Zen-like tranquility when dealing with the a-hole in question, he gets sucker punched for his troubles (:48). Devin responds with a hailstorm of GnP that would make Tito Ortiz turn green with envy, bloodying up his foe before possibly kissing him on the cheek (?) at the 1:13 mark. After some lay and pray, he patiently locks in the fight-ending choke with just over two minutes remaining in the first round.

Unfortunately, his foe is a firm believer in the Chael Sonnen system of submission fighting, and is under the impression that tapping out only ends the round, not the fight. After he is let to his feet to gather his things, he makes sure his hat is on at a good 45 degree angle before sucker punching Crime again (4:02). Crime proceeds to drag the assailant into the nearby bushes (4:06), and at this point it appears as if we are watching either a rape in progress or a snuff film or both. From there, it’s a smooth pass to mount and a rear-naked choke finish (5:00). When the thug is let back to his feet yet again, the singer of P.O.D appears out of nowhere to give him a final reason to get to stepping via his fist.

We have no idea if anyone was arrested for the alleged incident that sparked this brawl, but our hat goes off to Crime for his act of bravery. Nick Ring would be proud.

As it turns out, JoshTheGod is actually Mir Islam, and he was hauled in yesterday along with over two dozen other individuals spread across thirteen countries as part of a sting stemming from a two-year undercover operation known as Operation Card Shop. According to our inside sources, the capture of these individuals was led by an officer named Axel Foley, who had been assigned to, as he put it, “a multi-jurisdictional federal taskforce on organized crime” some twenty five years ago (Ed note: Now THAT’s preparation). After leading police on a chase across greater Detroit while still undercover, a chase that resulted in the deaths of 8 people and the destruction of 16 police vehicles, 7 fire hydrants, a magazine kiosk, and a stolen cement truck, Foley was able to apprehend each and every one of the suspects that he had not already gunned down in the chase.

Federal officials said Operation Card Shop, as the sting is being called, was unusually broad and represented a significant step in combating credit card fraud, which has grown notably more sophisticated recently.

The online forum, one law enforcement official said, was “like a restricted eBay,” open only to people who had a reputation and who had been vouched for by someone on the site. Besides the financial data, hacking tips, malware, spyware and access to stolen goods, like iPads and iPhones, were also possible on the site, the official said.

Many of the 11 individuals arrested in the United States offered specialized skills and products on the sting site. One, who used the screen name xVisceral, offered remote access tools known as RATS that would spy on computers and Web cameras; the programs sold for $50 a copy.

Another, Mir Islam, known as JoshTheGod, sold stolen credit card information and had data on 50,000 credit card accounts, according to the United States attorney for the Southern District. He was arrested after buying cards from an undercover agent and trying to use one at an A.T.M. on Eighth Avenue in Midtown Manhattan.

(Oh, Victoria. You’re *never* going to finish the choke from that angle. / Full gallery is after the jump.)

On July 7th, Tito Ortiz will be inducted into the UFC Hall of Fame, fight his last three rounds in the Octagon, then retire. In honor of this impending bit of MMA history, we’ve rounded up 20 of our all-time favorite photos of the Huntington Beach Bad Boy — some classic, and some you may not have seen before. Check ‘em out in the gallery below, and if we’ve left out your favorite, shoot us a link in the comments section. Enjoy…

Pictured: The closest Fernandes has come to landing a punch in the UFC.

After an astonishing 0-0 run in the UFC, it looks like Bibiano Fernandes already has a new home.

It’s being reported by MMAFighting.com that the former DREAM bantamweight champion has inked a deal with ONE FC and is set to make his promotional debut at an August 31 show in Manila, Philippines. An opponent has not been specified at this time.

Let’s get one thing straight, Kevin James has not exactly had the kind of career that would inspire a lot of confidence in his abilities as an actor. Sure, The King of Queens had it moments (not to mention all that Leah Remini goodness), but there is almost nothing that James can do to repair the mental anguish and self-inflicted bodily harm that Paul Blart: Mall Cop and Zookeeper were responsible for across the globe. We knew he was a big MMA fan, and seems like a pretty cool guy when he’s not squeezing out such 90 minute abortions as Grown Ups, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, and…*checks IMDB*…GROWN UPS 2?!!

(Oh, the horror…)

So you can understand our trepidation when we awoke this morning to find the first trailer for James’ upcoming MMA film, Here Comes the Boom, waiting for us to absorb and dissect. Because, if we’re being completely honest, there haven’t been many great (or even good) MMA films to be released since the “boom” of the sport. The fact that the latest one was staring an overweight sitcom star who is basically box office cancer didn’t exactly inspire much hope either.

And honestly, now that we’ve actually seen the trailer, we’re kind of relieved. Kind of.

Check it out for yourselves after the jump and let us know what you think.

“VADA anti-doping has offered to sponsor our upcoming fight. I’ve accepted and invite you to help me clean up the sport. VADA results will be released after the fight to ensure that the fight happens. Lets get started asap!!”