As weak as this is going to make me, Nessie im sorry. For everything. For lying for messing everything up for letting you believe you were talking to me when you really wernt. I didnt tell you because i thought i was protecting you and it turns out i probably would have hurt you alot less just by telling you the truth. I understand you probably want nothing to do with me but im crying my eyes out right now because the thought of you leaving my life kills me. I love you more then anything, more then i have ever loved anything and if i could go back in time and change the mistake i made i would. I would go through all that time in the terrifing detention center just to save your feelings. Your the best thing that has ever happened to me, i screwed things up worse then i ever have before and it's tearing my heart out. Your the owner of my heart and if you never want to talk to me i will leave for good. Anything i can do to make you happy i'll do it. Your the best girl ever and any guy would be lucky just to have you in their life, your cute, your nice, your sweet, your funny, you have a amazing personality, a amazing spirit and just the best girl ever to walk the earth no matter what anybody says about you your always going to be the best person ever. We did fight before but i missed you like crazy and i want you to know the whole time i was in the detention center i was dreaming and thinking about you. I never want to hurt you or get you upset in anyway so if you dont want me near you anymore i will leave.. say the word and i'll go... I love you.. please forgive me.. please... :(

cuts were what nate did, max never listened to the "specail" voicemails. Kiley, puppy exc were still with me. Nessie i thought it would be better if i didnt tell you.. i made a huge mistake and im so, so sorry..

okay, before i went into the courthouse i told max, kelsey and nate what i wanted them to do because i knew i was going to end up in the detention center so you have acually talked to nate and kels and nate does love you. i dont like that he does but i cant change that. the ring and everything else including special days were from me cause i would call him the night before to tell him what i wanted to say. Both rings are from me. The letter i wrote is from me and the drawings are mine so thats not fake, you've talked to kelse on the phone. Im not really sure what else i can tell you.. im still trying to think right now.

oh thank god.. nessie im soo sorry. i know your probably really mad and probably dont even want to talk to me but i had no choice i was in detention and i wanted to to have someone to talk to and.. im sorry :(