I am a Mommy. That fact has absorbed me for the past two years, since the birth of my son, Dominici (Dom). Reaching this point has hounded my thoughts for more than a decade. My husband and I battled infertility for eight years before we were blessed with our first miracle, Rivelino (Rivi). Unfortunately, he was born too early to live, and now he watches over us from Heaven. His little brother fills our lives with joy (and our heads with gray hair). This blog is the story of my Mommyhood.

All Together Mommies

One of these days, I will magically morph into one of those Mommies who have it all together. You know the ones - they balance soccer, ballet and grocery shopping and schedule each dentist appointment exactly six months after the last. They whip out their Blackberries in the carpool line and cross items from their to-do lists while they sing along with Baby Einstein CDs.

None of that is me. Well, I do have lists...a lot of them. I just can never find them when I need them. And by the time I do find a missing list, it is so outdated that I guiltily bury it in the trashcan while promising to do better next time. But I never do. I just don't have time to stay organized. I know that makes absolutely no sense, but it is the truth.

A few days ago, we were stranded with no diapers. I had somehow used both of the diapers from my purse, and the spare diaper we keep in the car was missing...I vaguely remember something about a playground on a hot July day with Dom yelling that the seat was burning his butt as he was changed. I guess I never replaced the emergency diaper.

And that is the story of my life. I am the Mommy who shows up at the playground without a snack and digs in her purse for gum while the other Mommies dole out animal crackers and juice. I cruise into McD's for nuggets when lunchtime rolls around on busy days because I forgot the sandwiches on the kitchen counter. I dig under carseats for toll money and am thrilled when my kid finds old raisins in the backseat because it means one less stop to get him a snack.

So, in short, I will never be one of those all-together Mommies. If I got a Blackberry, I would lose it within a week. It would fare no better than my paper lists. I do want to get more organized, though. I am obsessively DVRing and watching every episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8 that I can...if they can juggle eight kids, surely I can handle one. Right? Right.