Absolute Friends by John le Carré

Who is this Ted Mundy scratching out a living as a tour guide in one of Mad King Ludwig's castles? See how he peppers his spiel with asides about Bush and Blair's imperialist war. He pretends not to notice a face. Oh yes, sir, he is a professional. He waits till the room empties before examining the note. What can Sasha want?

* * *

See young Ted, growing up alone in Pakistan. His father is a drunk; he does not know his mother was an Irish maid. How early the deception starts. Oh yes, sir. He goes to boarding school in England. He feels alone but he is taught a love of Germany that stays with him.

At Oxford, he is again the outsider, but Ilse teaches him of love before rejecting him. "Go to Berlin," she says. "Tell Sasha I sent you."

Here is Ted standing by the Wall. He has joined forces with the intellectuals who have rejected their bourgeois roots. Oh yes, sir.

"Fuck off," says a voice. It is Sasha. Ted and he will soon become firm friends. Sasha is a misformed dwarf, a leader of the student revolution, whom all the women adore. "I have told no one that my father was a Nazi Lutheran minister," he confesses.

Sasha is falling under the blows of the West German riot police, before Ted carries him to safety. "You are a hero of the revolution," Sasha says.

Back in England, Ted marries Kate, who will become one of the modernisers of the Labour party. Suits you, sir. Ted starts working for the British Council, and escorts a theatre group through eastern Europe.

Ted worries that the leading lady is planning to smuggle her Polish lover back to England. What should he do?

"He's a KGB plant," whispers a voice. "The border guards will not find him, they want him to get through." Ted looks round. It is Sasha.

"I'm working for the Stasi," he continues. "It's a mistake - I did it to spite my father but he, too, is a Stasi hero. So I am going to be a double agent. You will be my contact. You must pretend to want to spy for the DDR."

Ted meets Amory, his British control, and the deal is agreed. For years Sasha passes information to the west, while Ted feeds the Stasi next to nothing. Ted's marriage ends, but he is happy in his work. Then the Wall comes down and Ted and Sasha are left rootless.

* * *

"Meet the people who want to set up a counter-university," says Sasha. "An institute free of western dogma." Ted has his reservations. The money comes from Riyadh and nothing is what it seems. Could it be an al-Qaida front?

Amory warns him it could be a CIA covert operation. Ted visits the school and he and Sasha are shot by German and US special forces. The west claims a victory in the war on terror.

The digested read... digested

Two Fast Show cold war double agents come unstuck in Blairtopia

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