Tuesday, September 02, 2008

SIR strikes again

She was one of the sweetest customers I'd encountered in the store, a diminutive lady, probably in her 70s, and from what I could tell, completely sightless. She wanted to buy some headphones, so I gave her my elbow to grasp and steered her over to the display of earbuds and lightweight sound devices. I didn't have to be told that she didn't want anything that would fuck up her hair - my mom and her bouf had already instilled that lesson in me.

When she'd ask to "see" a particular product, I'd take it out of the package and put it into her hands for closer inspection. She chose a pair of behind-the-head 'phones, and once again I gave her my elbow and we started toward the counter. On the way there, a friend of hers recognized her and came over to chat. They talked for a minute or two about churchy things, things obviously beyond my comprehension, then her friend asked if she was having any luck with her shopping.

You want us to think you're all badass and shit, but you're really just a big ol' soft-hearted guy... with tits. Or is it a soft-titted girl... with heart?? Either way, that was a damn nice thing for you to do.

This one made me laugh, Bucky. An old lady used to live next door to us and she could barely see. She thought my husband and I were lesbians. You'd laugh your ass off if you could see my gorilla. Er... I mean my husband.