Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The First Years BPA Free 3Pk Breastflow Bottle inclues the Breastflows patented nipple. They require both suction and compression, helping to extent breastfeeding. The Breastflow system is ideal for nursing moms who would like to introduce a bottle, are returning to work, or need to supplement.

This was the only bottle my breast-fed daughter would take because it was most like breast feeding. So many other brands claim to be, but it's not the same. The double nipple really made her work for it, just like at the breast.I had one complaint with the manufacturing, but they have fixed that (after many washes, the base would start to thin and would then leak) and if they could be found easier, I would give them 5 stars. I had to hoard them when my milk started drying up - I was so afraid I'd lose my ability to nurse not have enough bottles!

Daddy Fuss and I are reading "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. The basic premise is a biblical one - that women need love and men need respect to feel fulfilled. I know this to be true from my limited observations of marriages. The book talks about the concepts of "unconditional love" and unconditional respect" which most people are un familiar with. But if you look at it as the way that men feel "loved" is to feel repected.

Anyway, we are in the part written to women right now. The chapter we're to be talking about tonight is "hierarchy" where it talks about how men need to feel respected that they can provide and protect their family.

OMG, I never even considered that some of the things I have said might come off as disrespectful to my husband. I have commentedso many times over the years about "not having enough money" or "being used to having more money" without even considering that it might come across as saying "you don't make enough" or "your job isn't enough."

I feel awful. I truly do think that my husband is an amazing provider and protector. He goes day after day to a job he doesn't like, he is dedicated to doing a good job there, regardless. He makes a pretty good amount of money, too and any financial issues we have are more about making poor choices in the past than about not making enough now. To be perfectly honest, when we got pregnant, we were in a pickle financially and he made us buckle down and pay off our debt and make a emergency fund, etc. This past February we paid off all our credit card debt and medical bills. We both have student loans and we have our mortgage still, of course, but our debt reduction has been very significant. And it's all him. He has been so amazing in the efforts to get everything paid off, despite the resistance that I sometimes put up when I would much rather do something fun than do something responsible. (Ie. I love to eat out. Love it. Would do it 3-5 times per week if I were allowed. This would make me both fat and broke, so I totally get why I can't.)

My husband is amazing. He is such a great father to The Fuss (I often think he's a better parent than me, which is weird since I was the one who desperately wanted to be a parent as soon as possible).

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

I had a rough week last week. I guess you could tell from that post, but seriously, I was in a bad way. But Saturday things were better and by Monday I was in a really good place.

This morning, when The Fuss woke up from her morning nap she wanted to snuggle while she drank (more like chugged - 0-empty in - well, a very fast time - I didn't time it) and her milk and she just gazed at me with her beautiful blue-gray eyes and I stroked her soft skin and felt her warmth and all was right with the world. It was this amazing moment that only a mother would understand because it sounds kinda weird, but well - you either get it or you don't, right? And I felt like maybe I could do this mothering thing after all.

I talked to my college roommate this afternoon for the first time in a couple years. Periodically, we exchange emails, but I had a military-related question to ask that was time sensitive (more later) and she was the best source I could think of to ask. Her husband is a Marine recruiter. It was great to chat for a few minutes and catch up. It's interesting to see how different we are now, even though we're both married and have kids.

++++

We're trying to buy a mini van. I've wanted one for awhile, but we're just now getting to the point where it's becoming more of a reality to get one. But we have limited funds and will not take a bank loan to get one, so we're taking our time in searching. I found a listing on craigslist yesterday that sounded so perfect. Daddy Fuss traded emails with the owner a bit, and then we were told he was in the military and was being deployed in 2 weeks and was in a far away state and if we went though ebay's buyer protection plan, would we be interested in trying it, etc.?

We considered it - it sounded like exactly what we were looking for, the guy gave us the VIN number, etc. But I wanted to confirm that the guy was in fact in the military, so I called my old roommate to see if that was possible. She warned me that they had been notified that a bunch of scammers were using craigslist, claiming to be military personnel, etc. She also told me that if someone being deployed wanted to sell their car, it would be easy to do since there were always people coming back who were in the market, and if they couldn't that the military would store their vehicle for free, etc. I was like, "you know that makes sense."Daddy Fuss and I are typically very trusting individuals. When we got engaged, we fell for a scam involving high-end pots and pans and now every time I hear a "too good to be true" deal I ask him if that's what this is - "is this more pots and pans?" I think we did okay this time trying to do the research to figure it out before we went crazy with putting money into it, etc.

++++

I'm actually almost caught up with laundry for the first time in months. I have 1 more load to do, but I'm out of detergent. Isn't that always what happens?

Friday, April 17, 2009

Sometimes I feel like the World's Worst Mom.I get frustrated with the baby and I'm stressed out and then I yell at her. Or I'm really impatient with her and later, I feel awful, but in the moment, sometimes it's like I can't stop it.

I wonder, sometimes, if it was a mistake to become a mother. I love her, but sometimes I feel like such a failure - like I'm not doing enough, like I don't know how to interact with her properly, like I'm not teaching her enough or right or whatever.

And I feel even more guilty when I think of those women who are struggling to become mothers, or even worse, those who have lost their child. They would do this so much better.

And then things like last night happen to add to my "Worst Mom" status. At work last night just as I was getting ready to close the store, Daddy Fuss (who had come to bring us dinner) turns around and sees the baby about to drink cleaning solution. Long story short, we called Poison control (why is that number so hard to find? It took me forever) and the solution was 98% water and she was fine. She might have not gotten much, or any, but I was still freaking out.

SSBB

About Me

I love baby names and I love studying pop culture - specifically how popular literature, movies and TV effect our view of the world. So why not take a look at how pop culture effects the popularity of baby naming?