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some one posted something about its great to be alive My questions has anyone been near death if so what changes occured after that experience with values,your life, attitude, what became more important to you and what became less important to you. I say this for a few reason. Back in 97 my colon ruptured, no reason just happened,The doctor told Suzy another 30 minutes I would have been gone.The next morning I wak up in the hospitol and aksed suzy what the fuck happened ot me as I felt like a turck had hit me. I went from 210 pounds to 150 pounds in 10 days. With that in mind,what happened next in our lives and mine was nothing short of phenomenal. My values changed drastically.No longer was work in the top position. what became aparent to me that Suzy was number 1, thehn our children, then our true friends, fun and free time,take time to stop and just enjoy the samll things around us as simple as walking the ebach hand in hand. Watching the sun set while having a fire burning.Cracking open a cold one enjoying friends and thier lives. . Nothing became so serious that it could not be worked out, there is absolutely nothing that can't be fixed.Since these sparkling revalations we have enjoyed life to the extreme, if we want somethign we get it , if we wish to go somewhere we go.If I want to say fuck you to anyone I say fuck you.No longer any grey area What have you experienced?

This is exactly what I was looking for.Each persons life experience is and will be totally different. Actions and reactions are similar but totaly different. what kind of attitude changes, what has become more important to you, How the little things become interesting and fun.Stopping while walking picking a flower presenting it to Suzy with a smile thinking isn't this a great life we have made. It no longer becomes monetary subjects that bring the thrill of living and gasping for a breath of fresh air. We immediately sold our business made a comittment to staying right where we are. Quit working 14 hours or more a day.Its the excitement to wake each day and say hello world are you ready for us today. I think the biggest outcome happened between Suzy and myself. We now take time out for ourselves. We date each other at the min. 1 time during the week maybe 2.Every friday and saturday night we go out. No kids, no worries, no clocks to say you must be here at such and such a time.Time restricts everyone so much.The problem there is so little time to really enjoy whats out there for each of us. The difference from what the majority have felt, I had no prior knowledge of what was going other then pain for a few hours. I had no idea what was going on, how bad it was. The only thing I knew was after the fact. There is no fear of death,, never has been any.What I fear more then death would be the feelings of my immediate family. How would Suzy , our 3 kids deal with the rest of their lives.The fear of not seeing my childrens chidlren.Whether our kids are strong enough to deal. Whether there is a God or not is no longer of importance. What is important is what you believe in.If its people, your loved ones or yourself its all good.You can look at a very bad situation and see the good in it .How it will make you grow,how you can turn it around to your benefit.

Sarasota FL

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It's allready changin my life, I'm not the same person I was a few weeks ago. Priorities have changed, I'm more focused on the journey and less on the destination. I'm more inclined to walk lifes path and sight see as I go, than to run so fast that I miss it. I coud say more, but it's someone elses turn. Smiles

Mike

Bedford PA

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I have to agree wholeheartedly (no pun intended) with the last 2 posts about attitude changes after a near-death experience. Mine was a heart attack that also came without any warning whatsoever.

Paula and I also never part without saying "I love you." We hug & cuddle a LOT more than we did before the heart attack. It also made a big difference in my attitude toward work. It is very clear to me now that work is a way of supporting my life, it is NOT my life. I stop to smell the roses and appreciate their beauty.

I've slowed down. I'm not in a rush. In the words of Harry Chapin in his song Greyhound, "It's got to be the GOING, not the GETTING THERE, that's good!"

Jim

South Riding VA

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I was in a very serious car accident only one month after getting married. I was driving a toyota camry driving about 20mph through the intersection , when out of nowhere a ford expedition anticipating the light change on his side, didn't even slow down and hit my front passenger side door, going about 45mph, the impact from him was so hard that it immediately pushed me into the other side where there was a car stopped at the light hitting their car and mine on the drivers side door, it then spun my car and i hit the electric pole on the sidewalk head on. I remember one min listening to the radio and the next what seemed like coming out of a dream.. Everything was kinda fuzzy, music was still playing, lol... and i remember thinking why am i covered in glass. Then my next thought was, oh my god , I'm not breathing. I tried, but nothing. then I passed out again. I don't remember anything else from the accident. But the paramedics told me, that at the scene , my heart had stopped and i had stopped breathing. I do remember when I was only conscious for a min, when i couldn't breathe.. that i didn't want to die, i kept thinking about what it would do to my hubby. I knew how this would affect him. Well they had to use the "jaws of life" to get me out, still have a burn scar on my left thigh, from the metal on my door heating up from the thing, lol... I was transported to the hospital and taken to trauma, where i stopped breathing again. To make a long story short. I should have died twice. And yes I look at life alot differently now. For one I never let my husband leave the house without me telling him I love him, I never hang up the phone, without saying "I love you". we never go to sleep angry, or leave eachother with the last words being mean, or from an argument. We enjoy eachother and life as if it were our last day on this earth. We don't take one min for granted. I was in the hospital for 2 months and his love for me helped me get through all the pain and physical therapy. He stayed the night with me EVERY night. for 2 months!!!!! Only went home to shower and change for work. I have learned that life is precious and unpredictable. I was only 25 yrs old the time of my accident. And I can honestly tell you , before it happened.. Thought I had many years to live, I was young... ect... So in answer to the post. Yes my life and my husbands changed dramatically after my near death experience!! Yes it is great to be alive!!!!!!

Missy

Pittsburgh PA

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(continued...)

In the aftermath of this, as well as other crises - loss of job, necessity of accepting a position that practically removed me from my family for 14 months - I questioned the unquestionable. Was there really a God? If there was, was He really like the one I read about in the Bible? What about other faiths? Is it possible they were true, rather than the one I knew so well? What if none of them were? What if all of them (to some degree) were?

I also began to ask more natural questions... How would I live if the Christian faith was true or not? What is the bottom line? Since all (or most) religions seem to state some version of the "golden rule", what would life be like without all the other religious trappings?

I realized that life had so much more to offer than what I had accepted while I was busy narrowing it down further and further in biblical Do's and Dont's. I realized there was nothing really wrong (i.e. violating the golden rule) when _consenting_ adults enjoyed sexual pleasures together. I realized the only REAL problem was guilt. And although religion would make you believe that guilt is inherent, I began more and more to suspect it was applied externally - in other words, you have to be conditioned to believe something like "sex with consenting adults outside of marriage" is wrong.

Since having this "epiphany", I have been slowly researching issues surrounding the credibility of Christianity and coming up with some interesting findings. Nothing conclusive, but certainly interesting. It's a bit of a touchy subject with my wife as she does not seem to be as willing to question the unquestionable. I am also careful when dealing with the religion question with my children.

But what began as a crisis has turned out to be a liberation. I'm glad I'm alive, and I'm glad life has its pleasures. I no longer think its wise to deny them. Be wise, of course, but don't deny them.

This last Xmas, we watched the movie "Scrooge" and I found the song sung by the Ghost of Christmas Present apropo...

I like life, life likes me Life and I fairly fully agree Life is fine, life is good 'specially mine, which is just as it should be

I like pouring the wine, and why not? Life's a pleasure that I deny not!

I like life, life likes me I make life a perpetual spree Eating food, drinking wine Thinking "who'd like the privilege to dine me?"

Baltimore MD

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Nice topic. I have a different twist, but perhaps one that you all may value...

Often when people go through a crisis, religion becomes important to them - as they face the uncertainties of death and the "afterlife." (Hey CuriousNew - does that period belong in the quotes? LOL!) Although I did not face a life-threatening crisis, I did face a life-changing one and the outcome was actually in the opposite direction.

We had been very religious and on an ever-narrowing path as we sought to perfect our spiritual journey. I studied the Bible toward the end that I could not only defend the validity of my faith with "unbelievers", but also to validate it against the many other versions of Christianity that is out there. Even though I never intended to use my knowledge as a weapon to put down other faiths, it became increasingly just that. I found I was drawn to Christian publications that effectively used sarcasm as a tool of communication. I admired those who had the confidence and boldness to slice through the oponent's arguement with decisiveness and sardonic flair. Though I always sought to be gentle in personal communications with others in discussions of the faith, internally I was growing intellectual "fangs".

Then it happened. One of the most important persons of my life - my oldest son - rejected the faith I worked so achingly hard to instill in him. Not only did I wrench over this for some 2 years, but I came to grips with the sad fact that what may have mattered more to me than his loss of faith was the loss of my reputation as a "godly father". I had failed in the most fundamental of tasks - that of raising a child to carry on the legacy of the faith.

(continued...)

Baltimore MD

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some one posted something about its great to be alive My questions has anyone been near death if so what changes occured after that experience with values,your life, attitude, what became more important to you and what became less important to you. I say this for a few reason. Back in 97 my colon ruptured, no reason just happened,The doctor told Suzy another 30 minutes I would have been gone.The next morning I wak up in the hospitol and aksed suzy what the fuck happened ot me as I felt like a turck had hit me. I went from 210 pounds to 150 pounds in 10 days. With that in mind,what happened next in our lives and mine was nothing short of phenomenal. My values changed drastically.No longer was work in the top position. what became aparent to me that Suzy was number 1, thehn our children, then our true friends, fun and free time,take time to stop and just enjoy the samll things around us as simple as walking the ebach hand in hand. Watching the sun set while having a fire burning.Cracking open a cold one enjoying friends and thier lives. . Nothing became so serious that it could not be worked out, there is absolutely nothing that can't be fixed.Since these sparkling revalations we have enjoyed life to the extreme, if we want somethign we get it , if we wish to go somewhere we go.If I want to say fuck you to anyone I say fuck you.No longer any grey area What have you experienced?