11 Unique Ways Dads Can Bond With Baby

Bonding with a baby can be a daunting thought. Many parents worry about whether they’ll be able to bond with their baby or not. For dads, we don’t have the experience of carrying the baby, breastfeeding the baby or giving birth to the baby to help with our bonding. We have to think a little more creatively. But once you’re a dad, bonding needs to be high on your priority list.

In hindsight, from having had Ted, I’m not sure what both the wife and I were worried about, but we were both anxious about the whole issue of bonding. I’m looking back over my time with Ted and concluding that I do have a great bond with him, so whatever I did, it worked. I’ve spent some time thinking about it and come up with 10 simple ways dads can bond with their baby.

Ok, of course I know the physical limitations are a fairly big hurdle, but what I mean is, fully involve yourself in the birth. Pack the bag, ask your questions, rub her back, cut the cord, hold the baby as soon as possible. You’re going through a journey too, and acknowledging and embracing this will help you bond from the word go!

2 Take your top off

Whenever possible, get your top off and have a cuddle with your baby. Skin to skin contact goes a long way to building a closeness with your baby.

This is something all dads should do! I claimed bath time as ‘my’ time with Ted. 20 minutes or so that was just for me and him. I jump in with him and we’ve had that closeness together every evening from when he was born.

4 Go to all appointments

This may not be possible due to work commitments etc, but being part of as much as possible helps you feel connected to your baby. If you know what’s going on first hand you’ll feel closer. Also, when you’re there, make your presence known. There are so many cases of dads being ignored by midwives, health visitors and doctors and this is just wrong! Pull up a seat and be an active presence in the room.

If you’re bottle feeding, you can of course be heavily involved with feeding but if your baby is breastfed it’s a little more tricky. It may be possible for mum to express some breast milk into a bottle so that dad can feed. I’d highly recommend this and it wins brownie points if you adopt the late feed as yours! If expressing isn’t possible, and it can be difficult, there are still a few ways you can be involved in breastfeeding: winding baby, supporting mum, sitting with mum & baby etc

6 Walk

Take the baby for a walk using a baby carrier as often as you can. Early mornings are great, early evenings are good too. The position of the baby, when in a baby carrier is close and intimate. A good time for bonding!

7 Be silly

Playing silly, daft games that involve eye contact, making sounds, talking and touching is a great way of bonding. Toys are essential for this and with the vast range of educational, interactive and creative toys not the market, you’ll definitely find something you can use. My advice is to really be silly and let yourself go. You’ll both have fun! The worst thing that can happen is that your wife films it and sticks it on Facebook…

8 Become a book worm

Reading to your baby is amazing. Not only are you cuddling but also interacting and giving your full attention to your baby; exactly what they want. It’s so important for the baby’s development too.

9 Be confident

The more confident you are the easier it is to bond. The more involved you are, the more confident you’ll be. That’s just the way it is and you can’t do it any other way. You will gain confidence by being involved and you will bond if you’re confident.

10 Have realistic expectations

Think about what you can feasibly do and what your limitations are. It could be work, it could be a lack of confidence or it could be an over-controlling mum. Whatever it is, set realistic expectations and then you won’t beat yourself up. Sometimes I’d find parenting easy and I’d feel really close to Ted and there were other periods where it seemed to be more tricky.

11 Work out together

What? Down the gym! No, but a baby is an excellent weight for bicep curls! Joke!

I love this. Dad’s are forgotten when it comes to bonding time. The majority of posts and articles i read are all bout mother and baby bond time. Dad’s need that strong bond too. My partner has always had bath time as his too and would alternate feeds with me (bottle feeding). It has worked well for us as the three of us are all very close. #BigFatLinky

Number 9 s so important; be confident. Also, be prepared o make mistakes. You’re going to make them. Be confident enough to admit it and roll with the punches.

As for point Number 4, since April 2015 men in the UK have had the legal right to time off work to attend ante-natal appointments. It’s taken a long time to get this right…so use it! Thanks for hosting #BigFatLinky

Really great advice here! Bath time has always been Dad’s time in our house. The baby carrier is also a (welcome from me) dad job which both baby and Dad love. Dad is by far the favourite in our house – the smiles are all reserved for when he comes home! It’s also so important to be silly – Dad’s do this so well :) #bigfatlinky

Feeding my baby has been huge for me so far in these early stages of fatherhood. Since wifey has been pumping her milk, it’s provide the unique bonding opportunity that most breastfed babies don’t get in these first few weeks. Glad I stopped by on the #BigFatLinky

Fantastic post. I often read posts about mums bonding or feeling like they aren’t bonding with their new babies. Great to read about it from a dad’s point of view as I think dads are often overlooked in the beginning. Good, practical advice. Thanks for hosting the #bigfatlinky
Debbie

Having watched my husband and baby grow together and form this amazing bond is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. They spend all day together and from the early days I wasn’t concerned at all with going back to work and leaving ‘the boys’ at home. They have such a special relationship. They have ‘adventures’ each and everyday. The most wonderful part of being a parent is sharing it with one another

Really great tips here. Especially the skin to skin & bath time. That’s really nice that it’s your & Ted’s special time together. Being confident is important too – a new baby is overwhelming for both parents, especially the first one :) #bigfatlinky

Some really lovely ideas here. You forgot nappy changing though — that’s a great opportunity to play games and get to know your baby, especially in the early days when he or she might find it a bit upsetting and might need soothing. #bigfatlinky

Great suggestions for how dads can bond with a baby I think the first one is crucial as some fathers will just think to let mum get on with it all but it is just as much of an experience for them so getting involved in the labour and pregnancy gets you off on the right foot! #bigfatlinky

These are such lovely ideas. My husband always did the winding after I fed baby – it always felt like it was a team effort that way! He also loves bath time and enjoys helping with the bedtime routine now the children are older :) Thanks for co-hosting #bigfatlinky

Spearheaded by Al Ferguson, The Dad Network combines a personal blog with an ever-growing community of dads. Created as a personal outlet for Al Ferguson following a devastating miscarriage on his wedding day, The Dad Network has gone on to provide support to thousands of dads across the world.