Hand holding pls, 26 weeks, friend in labour now

That's it really, I'm far away, feeing useless, terrified for friend and her baby and would really appreciate some hand holding, positive thoughts, and any personal experiences, ideas how I can be a good friend and support my friend, ideas of anything she might need.

Sorry to hear this you must be very worried. My dd nearly came at 26 weeks so looked into what could happen. It will be difficult, but baby has a chance so stay positive for her. Text her to let her know you are thinking of them. Have a look at the bliss website too.

Sorry to hear about your news. I agree with Plenty about the texting. You could also send a gift box. I gave birth at 29 Wks so had no essential items. A friend brought a box of much needed everyday gifts which were a god send (breast pads, sanitary towels, chocolate, underwear, socks, nail file, nipple cream) xx

Hi. My DD was born at 25+1 and in all honesty, your friend will have a very hard few months. However, NICU care is amazing, so her baby has every chance (if it helps to know, my DD is now 21mo and is a walking, talking bundle of happiness). In terms of what you can do - it was really important to me to have the birth acknowledged, so sending a card would probably be really appreciated, as would letting her know that you're thinking about her regularly over the next few months while her baby is in hospital.As a pp has said, support is available through Bliss (they can offer some counselling, for example).Wishing your friend and her baby every scrap of luck. Am holding your hand tight. xx

It shows how we all differ. I had a little boy at 24+6 and I didn't want to open cards/gifts for him until I knew he would live - prob until he was 6-8 weeks old as he was so poorly. I really appreciated stuff for me - people sent me nice hand cream (its a bummer washing your hands a gazillion times a day) left food on our doorstep, nice snacks to take into hospital, offer to do washing/clean the house/run errands/just some nice special treats. One friend bought me a new pair of PJs which I really loved at the time.

Is there any news on how she or the little one are doing? Definitely point her in the direction of bliss and this group x

Hope all is well with your friend and her baby. When we were in NICU a friend left a care package with snacks and drinks at the nurse's station. Since you are far, maybe you can have a gift basket with snacks delivered to the NICU. It is very warm inside the NICU and you can easily become dehydrated. Something to drink will be very welcome. You can also offer to be her spokesperson if you have a lot of friends in common. Answering the same questions over and over is exhausting. It is not always good news and you often don't have the emotional energy to repeat the horrible details. If the baby is a bit more stable you can send prem nappies. It is very expensive and you run out quickly and don't always have time to go out and buy more. Find out first if it is supplied by the hospital or by the parents.

My hands were destroyed by hand washing in NNU. Send Neutrogena! Another vote for snacks and drinks, too - we were there for 15days and I lost so much weight that I was smaller than before I was pregnant (I now weigh more than I did the day before he was born -oops!). I kept running out of knickers, nappies, cotton wool and sanitary towels.