Top Funny Seamen Quotes

Favorite Funny Seamen Quotes

1. "Why would they have gone to the trouble to hire the best comedy writers in the business to write funny material for us to play straight, if the children in our audience were the only audience."Author: Burt Ward

2. "I have a funny accent in every language."Author: Carmen Busquets

3. "Madam Dorothea shot him a dark look. "If you were half as funny as you thought you were, my boy, you'd be twice as funny as you are."Author: Cassandra Clare

4. "So...I'm the funny one? I'm the funny sidekick?...That's no way to talk about anyone! To say they're just hangers-on to someone more important."Author: China Miéville

7. "You already made your point," I say with a mouthful of fruit. "Did I?""Oh, for the love of dick, yes. Now leave me alone." "Never. If you want, I'll fuck you now." The gall. I wouldn't fuck him now if my clit was on fire and needed to be doused with nub-saving cum. I roll my eyes at him. "No thanks, we have a lifetime of fucking ahead of us," I say mockingly. He shrugs and starts to walk away as if it makes no difference to him one way or the other. He's such a jackass sometimes. Before I can stop myself I throw my half-eaten banana at him and it hits him on the back of his neck. He spins around, wipes his neck and looks down at the banana on the floor. "Did you really just fruitally assault me?"He thinks he's so damned funny with his wordplay."Author: Ella Dominguez

8. "Fine's a funny word, don't you think? I don't think there's another like it in the English language that says so much while actually saying so little."Author: Emma Chase

9. "After that came her biggie: a triple murder--her dealer, the dealer's sister, and the dealer's sister's boyfriend.Reading that made me feel a little funny that we'd fucked and I'd loved her."Author: George Saunders

10. "It's a funny thing because you look at the careers of other filmmakers, and you see them sort of slow down, and you realize, maybe this becomes harder to do as you get older. That's sort of a cautionary thing. I hope it doesn't happen to me."Author: Joel Coen

11. "MyrtleHow funny your name would beif you could follow it back to wherethe first person thought of saying it,naming himself that, or maybesome other persons thought of itand named that person. It wouldbe like following a river to its source,which would be impossible. Rivers have no source.They just automatically appear at a placewhere they get wider, and soon a realriver comes along, with fish and debris,regal as you please, and someonehas already given it a name: St. Benno(saints are popular for this purpose) or, orsome other name, the name of hislong-lost girlfriend, who comesat long last to impersonate that river,on a stage, her voice clankinglike its bed, her clothing of sandand pasted paper, a piece of real technology,while all along she is thinking, I cando what I want to do. But I want to stay here."Author: John Ashbery

12. "And here's a story you can hardly believe, but it's true, and it's funny and it's beautiful. There was a family of twelve and they were forced off the land. They had no car. They built a trailer out of junk and loaded it with their possessions. They pulled it to the side of 66 and waited. And pretty soon a sedan picked them up. Five of them rode in the sedan and seven on the trailer, and a dog on the trailer. They got to California in two jumps. The man who pulled them fed them. And that's true. But how can such courage be, and such faith in their own species? Very few things would teach such faith.The people in flight from the terror behind - strange things happen to them, some bitterly cruel and some so beautiful that the faith is refired forever."Author: John Steinbeck

13. "In all my years as an actor, I had never been me - I had always hidden behind my glasses, mustaches and funny voices."Author: Jon Pertwee

14. "But this show reminds me that there are other aspects to me besides the fact that I'm a funny chick."Author: Kristen Johnston

15. "The world is in trouble because of a few funny sympathetic philosophers"Author: M.F. Moonzajer

16. "Not dead-dying. Funny how two things could be so similar and yet so far apart"Author: Maggie Stiefvater

17. "The funny thing is that my husband couldn't be sweeter. He looks like this bad boy. He's got tattoos and earrings and a mohawk, but when you talk to him and he's around you, he's such a gentleman. He holds doors for ladies. He pulls out chairs. He cooks. He cleans."Author: Malin Akerman

18. "Obviously we know Bill Hader is funny and charming, but my question is, can he do raw humanity and naturalism? I think so."Author: Mark Duplass

19. "I'm going away anyway. I am. Do you hear me? I may be ugly and clumsy, but one thing I am not, I'm not retarded. I may be ugly and clumsy, but one thing I am not, I'm not retarded. There's nothing wrong with my brain. Do you know what the Teacher Ghosts say about me? They tell me I'm smart, and I can win scholarships. I can get into colleges. I've already applied. I'm smart. I can do all sorts of things. I know how to get A's, and they say I could be a scientist or a mathematician if I want. I can make a living and take care of myself. So you don't have to find me a keeper who's too dumb to know a bad bargain. I'm so smart, if they say write ten pages, I can write fifteen. I can do ghost things even better than ghosts can. Not everyone thinks I'm nothing. I am not going to be a slave or a wife. Even if I am stupid and talk funny amd get sick, I won't let you turn me into a slave or a wife. I'm getting out of here. I can't stand living here anyore. It's your fault I talk weird."Author: Maxine Hong Kingston

20. "She leans over an says things that make him throw his head back an laugh like he never heard nuthin so funny in his life. It's sick-makin. Or it would be, if I cared. Which I don't. Liar, whispers the voice inside my head. Liar, liar, liar."Author: Moira Young

21. "When I left Merle was wearing a bungalow apron and rolling pie crust. She came to the door wiping her hands on the apron and kissed me on the mouth and began to cry and ran back into the house, leaving the doorway empty [...] I had a funny feeling as I saw the house disappear, as though I had written a poem and it was very good and I had lost it and would never remember it again. (p. 262)"Author: Raymond Chandler

22. "Orpheus never liked words. He had his music. He would get a funny look on his face and I would say what are you thinking about and he would always be thinking about music."Author: Sarah Ruhl

23. "I have to step out for a second. Don't do anything funny while I'm gone."Author: Stephenie Meyer

25. "Veil, you see, if I vas to say something portentous like "zer dark eyes of zer mind" back home in Uberwald, zer would be a sudden crash of thunder,' said Otto. 'And if I vas to point at a castle on a towering crag and say "Yonder is . . . zer castle" a volf would be bound to howl mournfully.' He sighed. 'In zer old country, zer scenery is psychotropic and knows vot is expected of it. Here, alas, people just look at you in a funny vay."Author: Terry Pratchett