The Chund Patrol

Chund in my language means a slap. In other words, to use the Americanized reference “sounds-like-ditch slap”.

Now, why I feel like writing this down.

I was watching people on the road, and realized, that the majority of drivers, whether motorcycle, car or a heavy vehicle, do really really really stupid things. It annoys me how these people on the road think the road is solely their property, and they have the absolute right of way and everyone else has to give way to them.

The idea I got was for a “Chund Patrol”. This would be a specially trained policing group, with similar authority to that of the traffic police, however, instead of giving out traffic violation tickets, they would give out “chunds” (thats the plural of chund). Also, they would take photographs of violators and print them on a web portal for all to see the violation, the chunds being handed out and who the culprits are.

There will be at least a pair of specially uniformed officers, at each intersection and at set intervals on sections without frequent intersections. These officers of the Chund Patrol will have the final say on how many Chunds will be handed out based on general rules that will be set. The severity of the violation — read as stupidity — will dictate the punnishment for the culprit.

I think it is a great idea. Plus the pictures and perhaps video when possible will make sure the system remains impartial, fair and transparent. These officers will also be given bonuses based on chands given to people who consider themselves above the law, like government drivers, and big luxury 4×4 drivers, and expensive car drivers.

The downside of this plan is the nature of our nation. Soon you’ll have “ameer-baap-ki-bigrhi-aulad” (spoilt kids of rich fathers) competing on who gets the most chunds. Now that is a sad state of affairs. When people actualy compete on who’s more stupid.