The only political persuasion left for free thinking people in the United States. The only viable political party left for libertarians who have brains enough to see that the Republican party has been taken over by greed-mongoring, war-mongering, closet-bigotted, crony-paying, corporatist assholes who are all too eager to cut your verteran father's healthcare, send your brother into battle without armor, strip your sick grandmother out of her medicaid coverage, and move your job overseas if can save them and their mega-rich buddies a few dollars.

Democrat is the designation of a political party that has sucked for a long time, but the only one left for anyone who thinks government doesn't belong snooping in your bedroom or in your church group.

Democrat is the only political label for anyone who gets laid on a regular basis. Because we all know that these stuffy no-dick asswipe Republicans aren't getting any. If you vote for bigger trucks and bigger bombs you must be compensating for something! And if you are a woman and vote Republican, you must have dried up a long time ago.

Democrat is the only way left to keep souless dry-balled pricks like Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld from fucking it up for everyone but their mega-wealthy buddies - using their talking monkey George Bush and their token Afro-American woman Condi Rice to make it all sound nice to those who aren't paying attention.

Democrat - if you care about your job, your family, and our country - is the only label with hope anymore.

See that guy over there? He's sexy, a survivor. He can kick some ass if he needs to but doesn't need to be a blow-hard bully to prove himself. He actually gets along with people of different colors and ways of life. He doesn't stuff his religion down your throat either. He doesn't think that screwing other people out of what they want and need is always the right way to get ahead, even if it is the easiest. He's probably read a few books without being forced to by a teacher. He must be a Democrat!

Apparently, people who aren't allowed to back up their point of view with evidence.

Republican: It's obvious the Bush tax cuts helped the poor more than the rich.
Democrat: Actually, statistically, the rich recieved almost-
Republican: Your numbers mean nothing.
Democrat: This entire issue is about numbers!
Republican: No, this is about the people! This is about Joe Everyman!
Democrat: What the hell are you talking about?
Republican: I'm talking about how you radicals use numbers to mislead everyone into thinking the Bush tax cuts were bad, and that we have massive debt.
Democrat: ...We DO have massive debt, and the average person got around $300 back, whereas the rich got-
Republican: Are you telling these people America is BAD? Are you saying that America isn't the best damn country ever?
Democrat: No, I just-wait, what? This isn't about me! This is about the issues!
Republican: Not responding to my questions. Typical.
Democrat: ...
Republican: See, clearly I have silenced you with my powerful, factual argument.
Democrat: I had sex with your wife, Bill.
Republican: What?!?
Democrat: She said she wanted a man who didn't tell her she belonged in the kitchen.
Republican: ...

2. Tend to believe that government should come to the aid the most disadvantaged in society (see Unemployment Insurance, Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security). We don't bring it up much, but it's what Jesus taught.

3. Belive in the separation of church and state, on the off-chance that not everyone in America is a Southern Baptist.

4. Doesn't believe that industries have the unfettered right to dump carcinogens into our water supplies. Also believe in protecting public health and worker safety.

5. Believe in strengthening public education, rather than gutting it with vouchers.

6. Belive in civil liberties and equal rights for all people, regardless of gender, race, or sexual orientation; a Democratic President pushed through the Civil Rights Act even though it meant losing half of his party. That half, comprising mostly of racist whites, now overwhelmingly votes Republican.

7. Most have actually read the 9th amendment. Can also spell "amendment."

2. Tend to believe that government should come to the aid the most disadvantaged in society (see Unemployment Insurance, Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security). We don't bring it up much, but it's what Jesus taught.

3. Belive in the separation of church and state, on the off-chance that not everyone in America is a Southern Baptist.

4. Doesn't believe that industries have the unfettered right to dump carcinogens into our water supplies. Also believe in protecting public health and worker safety.

5. Believe in strengthening public education, rather than gutting it with vouchers.

6. Belive in civil liberties and equal rights for all people, regardless of gender, race, or sexual orientation; a Democratic President pushed through the Civil Rights Act even though it meant losing half of his party. That half, comprising mostly of racist whites, now overwhelmingly votes Republican.

7. Most have actually read the 9th amendment. Can also spell "amendment."

The (relatively) left-wing party of the united states of America. Home of politicians who are usually not that bright. Voters show a preference for stupidity over evil, while their republican counter-parts tend to favour evil over idiocy