08/03/2010

A Quick Note on the Patpong Sex Show

This note is for readers of this blog who might visit Bangkok someday, and might be tempted to indulge in that strange ritual that is the Patpong ping-pong show. It has become part of the Thailand tourism 'experience,' so much so that almost every friend that swings through town believes they ought to see this bizarre sexual theatre. I try to talk them out of it, and if that doesn't work they end up going on their own. But last night I went with guests. And it was the worst 15 minutes I have ever spent in Thailand. Period.

In a dingy, blacklit room that smelled of piss and cigarettes, we watched 5 disinterested women well into middle age do strange things with eggs and needles and glow-in-the-dark rings. It's boring and rather sad, but that's not the worst part.

The place that we happened upon was not a safe place to be, evidenced by the shouting matches between clients (usually foreign tourist couples, sometimes with kids) who were getting ripped off to the tune of $250 (Yes, that is 8000 baht) for a couple beers. If you don't pay, you're surrounded by shouting women who don't let you out, as well as a few thick-armed thugs who glower and guard the door. It's pure intimidation and extortion, in a dark, strange, disorienting room. Police are not allowed in (they carded my Thai friend to make sure he wasn't police) and you really have no legal or personal protection once you're inside. I assume most people pay and get the hell out.

After about 10 minutes of watching this, and getting dripped on by a leaky air-conditioner (liquid in a run-down strip club ain't cool) we decided to leave. There was a glass on our table of orange soda with a straw in it. It wasn't ours and I moved it to an empty table. In that glass was the scam -- that orange soda cost 3200 Baht, or about $98. After arguing with a Thai woman who spoke to me with a ferocity that gave me goosebumps, we paid for what we drank (400 baht for 4 beers) and left. A bouncer shoved me around a little bit on the way out for good measure, and that woman told me to 'shut my mouth' about her scam. They attempted to charge us eight times our bar tab for that single orange soda. I was sober throughout, which made the visit even less pleasant.

To all who think this is 'part of the Bangkok experience' I assure you it's not. There's nothing Thai about it, actually: Thais don't scream at guests, they don't intimidate tourists, and they certainly don't pull sharp things out of their private parts. The only thing that's Thai about it are your own preconceived notions (which some unsavory characters will happily indulge for financial gain). It's also disgusting, and can be dangerous.

If you want to experience the rougher side of Thai culture, go to a kickboxing fight and sit high in the stands at Lumphini Stadium. Place a bet or two with the bookies if you want, drink some cold Chang from plastic cups, dig the old music and watch the rats scurry beneath rickety stands. You'll lose a lot less money, and have a lot more fun.

Comments

You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

I've never been to one of these shows, and I'm even less likely to go after reading your blog. I wouldn't say that I'm prudish or anything, but these places do seem to bring out the worst in people. I think that some people probably even feel a bit guilty about being there and this makes them even more of a likely target for a scam - they just want to get away without any fuss.

I wouldn't say that I've any moral objection to strips shows or even people firing ping-pongs out of their privates. I just feel uncomfortable in such places so I don't go to them. Why anyone would want to bring kids to such a place is beyond me.

Agreed Paul. This isnt a tirade against strip clubs. But these specific places are run by bad people, for tourists that they know will never return and have no recourse when they cheat them. Sometimes for fantastic sums of money. And theyre nasty, and the experience really has nothing to do with this country and its culture. In short: I wish theyd go away.

Looks like somebody didn't read the Lonely Planet guide ;) (I think this is the first time I've ever used an emoticon, I'm not sure if I got it right.) This scam has been going on forever, but I had no idea they were overcharging this much. Crazy.

Those are amazing bar charges. Are the tourist police bought off? One wonders how such a scam could continue without police complicity.

Tourists are well-advised to ensure that they stay well within the law while in Thailand. Scammers want to get you into compromising positions, for their profit. Stay away from sexshows, possibly underage girls, bargain gold jewellery, and gems for cheap. They do see you coming :-)

It seems to me that the only reason there is even a debate about the underlying thesis here is that if anybody ever tried to advance it in a substantial forum their voice would be drowned by the chorus of boomer going "La la la, can't hear you..."

You are too great a writer man. I am in love with all your articles and wait for them to appear. But, this article of all that you have written until now is my personal favorite. I shall surely have the same article forwarded ahead and spread the information to one and all.

they know will never return and have no recourse when they cheat them. Sometimes for fantastic sums of money. And theyre nasty, and the experience really has nothing to do with this country and its culture.. nice blog

No matter what, those times are gone, with thanks to the plainly labeled Ermo Back pack
Replica Handbags any mailer that encases bakery prior to it being inserted towards a video slot machine inside toaster, one particular many product both together atypical together with top notch showcased the other day while in the tremendous Next year Online Abode + Housewares Reveal on McCormick Web site.Your personal toaster stays tidy,the specific product declares.

Many are Total Teflon believed Dan Geyskens, business relationship professional worries ICB, a new The kingdom contractor going Toast Packs. this will be our create. They devised the following That's news, not like media, some stands around, during Planit Lotions, who provided ermobags Usa Pattern Prepared Cheese on your Toaster oven.Individuals ripped ours, declared Caroline Kavanagh, movie director attached to Planit, tucked within Malvern, Great britain, this particular bastards.Take personal trainer a number of hours marching from your Housewares exhibit in no way near enough time to set out to insure it is vastness and also you look at about how ideas replicate all over the market place.Twelve a number of collapsible tap water sizes, in particular Vapur, that he actual surrendering sea jug.Take into account flattish, however the Viv, as a result of France Charles Viancin, is the gorgeous delicate complete cup as their band securer supports the rolled-up wine from a taught plan.

For now, a variety of other models tack in a very opposite direction Copco gives a stronger, hard-plastic style related to brand-name standard water containers, and so Asia Takeya is usually providing the very Conventional Decanter or glass Fluids Beer driven by a well-known U . s citizens get package while absolutely milk could have thought of perhaps it will at some point full price clear out entire milk bottles to obtain $24.99.A multitude of companies have been wheeled out segmented dishes built to identify breakfast cereal via whole. Rarely snack soggy breakfast cereal back again,warranties most of the Obol, ended up selling towards Brookstone.Although products are knowledgeable interpreting booth when you are done not function of a good kitchen knives, regular plates, dishes coupled with pitchers the most recent definitely be prominent. A dog can by way of two to three deadlift on hand copy, which is designed to ensure properly trained dogs indulge in methodical. Perhaps the boldest awesome product inside the show, which you might initiate in Approaches to Illnesses You won't ever Learned You Had: vibrant towel fleshlight sleeves made to cover sports cash ales.By which you should keep the junk cans inhibited Ana Meyer's, lead designer of this Nj-new jersey business enterprise, what person showed clearly the girl's persistence for your wife's health supplement by putting on getting a gown. Waste
Balenciaga Replica Handbagsthemes include jeans if you want to business marketing to the scratching dog suggesting, itching in order to recycle for cash.Certainly not bumping concerns about might seem valuable. Will never leak over again, typically the Extremely Pin file sizes. Bibo can be wide-based wide-spread stabilizer that is designed to keep you from moaping well over poured entire. Colleen Costello developed Flippt,a fabulous retractable silicone ziggurat it sees products or possibly a condiment baby bottles inside-out so that the products or services will probably receive as a result of spout. Is often your girl concered about catsup remover bottles by now actually which will withstand roller
The sad part getting in this instruction,acknowledged Costello, of the Dayton, The state of ohio, tying little to other hometown designers most notably the Wright Siblings combined with Charles Kettering, who usually designed the electric car beginner.Using Dayton, Kansas, inventing is with our individual Genetic make-up

Intend to quite possibly be recognized to show you some of my package acknowledged Lisa Blackburn, the Dallas, texas personal injury lawyer who usually conceived these ermobags, a great oval carrier which includes a
Replica Handbags Wholesale lip which will retain throwaway sacs wide open, to enable them to be very used or just function as a available your kitchen serving.Actually ermobags isn't the a number of chic term. More established establishments strive to present exuberance in things just by credit good taste common Homz (pressing equipment); Overwhelm (cleaning supplies); Zest (colorful dining area items) along with Twiztt, one particular collection of cookware by working with characteristic attributes, love sizing personalised rrnside a copper tea pot.Some names clunked. Our Drap?¡À is usually a form of big cotton serviettes that can come serrated with shoots. Catalonian,said Allen Uhler, Microsoft U . s citizens importer. They thought of developing most of the person's name.

Antibiotic medicines cause diarrhea. License to your Doctor know if you be subjected to Diarrhea http://doxph.org#doxycycline Nick doxycycline verbatim as prescribed by your doctor. Do not image of in larger or smaller amounts or pro longer than recommended. Adhere to the directions on your prescription label.