Tuesday, August 8

Three newly-wedded couples

Three couples had married on the same day, and now were staying at the same hotel for their honeymoons. The first man had married a nurse. The bellboy shook his head in envy: What a lucky guy. Nurses are known to be hot to trot. The second man had married a telephone operator. As he showed them to their room, the bellboy thought to himself: Wow, he is a lucky one. Telephone operators have sexy voices, and once you pop that top button ... The third man had married a school teacher, and the bellboy showed this newly wedded couple to their room almost in pity: Poor guy, she is pretty, but teachers are just too frigid.

Came the next morning. The bellboy's shift started at 5 am. He expected the teacher's husband to call for breakfast within an hour, while the other two would call in room service much later in the day. But when the telephone rings at 6 am, it is the nurse's husband who wants breakfast. And when the bellboy delivers it, he gets a shock: the man's pyjamas are still neatly pressed and his hair nicely combed. Awkwardly (but curious!) he asks what had happened. "After all, sir, you married a nurse."

"Son," says the man in the voice of experience, "don't ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night was her nagging voice saying 'you're not sanitary, you're not sanitary'."

So the bellboy goes back down to the main desk to wait for the next call. At 6:30 am, the telephone operator's husband calls for breakfast. And the bellboy delivers it promptly, but again he gets a shock: this husband too, although in his pyjamas, is immaculately groomed. Once again he asks what happened: "After all, sir, you married a telephone operator."

"Son," says the second man in the voice of experience, "don't ever marry a telephone operator. All I heard last night was her nasal voice saying 'your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up'."

So the bellboy goes back down to the main desk to wait, just knowing the teacher's husband will be calling any minute for breakfast ... but that call doesn't come until nearly the end of his shift, at 4:30 pm. Though surprised, the bellboy quickly brings it to the couple's room. And there he receives a shock of a different sort: for the husband was an absolute mess. He wore only his boxers, and there were scratch marks on his chest, arms, and legs. "What happened, sir?" asks the bellboy, fearing the worst. "Did you have a fight?"

The man smiles: "No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry a school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying 'We are going to do this over and over, until we get it right'."