SOCCER PLAYER MURDERED BY EX-GIRLFRIEND

Thiago da Silva, a second-divisione Brazilian soccer player, was tortured and murdered by assassins hired by his recently spurned ex-girlfriend and her aunt. Yikes.

Before he passed away, da Silva was able to tell the police that he had fallen into a trap last Thursday evening, shortly after discussing the end of his relationship with his girlfriend, Alyne Padula.

The former Vasco player was overwhelmed by three people (including a member of the military police), all of whom are friends of the girl’s aunt. He was handcuffed, beaten and tortured. When he tried to flee he was hit by three bullets.

This is horrible. Soccer players from South America should only ever be killed by angry fans.

Not to make light of a horrible situation, but I have to ask… So this girl, Alyne? She’s single, Brazilian, and going to prison, right? My God, she’s everything I’ve ever wanted! Well, except for the vindictive murderer part. But let’s face it, I could probably overlook that.