Did This Happen in a Real Tennis Match or 7 Days in Hell?

Lest we forget what Wimbledon is really about—barf, birds, branding, butts, and boinking—HBO has brought us 7 Days in Hell, an impeccably produced mockumentary about a never-ending tennis match. The special stars Andy Samberg and Kit Harington (who is actually really, really convincing as a tennis player) and includes cameos from about 2,000 celebrities. It's streaming now and premiering Saturday, and it is sublime.

7 Days in Hell is ridiculous, but so is real tennis. Can you tell which of the following incidents are from actual tournaments, and which are from Samberg v. Harington?

NBC Accidentally Shows Player Barfing in Slow Motion

Player Puts Cocaine in Water Bottle, Racket, Court Lines

Player Barfs Twice, Wins Match

Player Stops Match, Befriends Little Bird

Queen of England Tells Player, “You’re Embarrassing Your Country”

Players Strip On Court, Frolic About

Stray Serve Kills Ball Boy

Player Stops Match to Pray Over Corpse of Bird Killed by Racket

David Copperfield Apparates Onto Player’s Shoulders

Player Makes Sweet Sweet Love to Two Streakers On Court

Answers:

1.Actually happened. 2. From 7 Days in Hell, but with ample precedent (looking at you, Vitas Gerulaitis). 3. Pete Sampras, 1996. Lots of barf in tennis. 4.Real. Adorable. 5. From 7 Days in Hell, but you know she’s thinking it. 6.Real. It gets hot out there. 7. From 7 Days in Hell, although something definitely died inside this unfortunate ball boy. 8. Real. Stay home, birds of Wimbledon. 9. From 7 Days in Hell, but David Copperfield is a magical, magical man. 10. Only in 7 Days in Hell. Probably.

Update: A vigilant reader just informed us that a linesman was, in fact, killed by a serve from Stefan Edberg in 1983.