Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is coming soon. I am looking for that very special person to share this loving couple’s day. We’ll have a romantic dinner, cocktails and dancing until dawn in a classy downtown night club. If you are interested please let me know. I’ll expect a four page, double spaced paper with 1″ margins using APA format no later than Feb 10, 2016. At least three references must be used.

Another favorite:

My son made a t-shirt that says: Vonnegut laid tonight? He said he is still waiting for that one special girl to come up to him in a bar and get it. (The Vonnegut part; not the getting laid reference).

And some valentine’s are just like this:

ATC: “Airline 123, are you listening to me?”
Pilot: “Yes ma’am, we hear you.”
ATC: (Sarcastically) I called you 3-4 times and you didn’t respond. Listen up!“
Pilot: “I’m sorry ma’am, you sounded so much like my wife I was just naturally ignoring you.”
After a 15 second pause, a male controller comes on and says “Roger Airline 123, I understand.”

For me it was all good.

I bought my husband the mushy card with very minimal bitching. (We all know how much I hate spending $5.00 on a stupid mushy Valentine’s Day card; I mean that would buy a Starbucks, for heavens sake!) And I cleaned the oven as a gift for my husband because we have been married almost 30 years and I know exactly what he wanted. I got some turtle candy in a cardboard heart box and then started watching all the Nurse Jackie shows on Netflix. Alone. What a great Valentine’s Day. I love my husband.