In the War Between Texas and Maryland, My Money’s on Maryland

So Texas Governor Rick Perry pretty much just declared war. In an attempt to coerce both businesses and average citizens to move to the Lone Star State, Perry has created a radio ad that is just one long string of insults against Maryland. “When you grow tired of Maryland taxes squeezing every dime out of your business, think Texas,” Perry says in the spot, according to the Baltimore Sun. It also insults Governor Martin O’Malley for turning Maryland into ” the Tax and Fee State, where businesses and families are paying some of the highest taxes in America.” Well, Perry, you have no idea what you’ve gotten yourself into. Here are a few simple reasons you’re a fool to mess with Maryland:

5) There is, unsurprisingly, a website called TexasSucks.com. MarylandSucks.com? Doesn’t exist. If it comes down to it, Maryland will win this war by sheer numbers alone — just because we’ll be able to recruit all those Texas-haters out there.

6) Another great benefit of Texas’ regulation-lite, business-friendly atmosphere? The worst pollution record in the entire country.