Why all the F-uss over David Ortiz at Fenway Park?

Boston Red Sox's David Ortiz pumps his fist in front of an American flag and a line of Boston Marathon volunteers, background, after addressing the crowd before the Red Sox-Royals game on April 20.Associated Press photo

More than once, I have been asked how I'm doing on my new year's resolution

The answer was a matter of interpretation long before David Ortiz, of the Boston Red Sox, made foul words a fair topic.

If a parent cannot sit down with a child and explain how extraordinary circumstances can justify otherwise unacceptable reactions - in other words, it's still not OK to blurt this word out at recess, the said parent has not done a very job of developing communication with the child.

A lot of these parents are expecting the Ortizes of the world to do their job of instilling values in their kids. I don't have a lot of regard for this way of thinking.

That said, it was because of my 11-year-old daughter's distaste for bad words that I was prompted to give up cursing altogether. And, I've got to tell you, as my English teacher once said, it ain't easy.

For one thing, most of my expletive usage was in humor, not rage. Some great punch lines have been squandered since Jan. 1.

For another, there are times when the off-color word not only satisfies an emotional need, but fits the context of the message just perfectly.

The Oxford English Dictionary lists 171,476 words in current use, not counting 47,156 obsolete words and a host of commonly used abbreviations, dialects and slang.

I am not proud to say this, but there are times when none seems as suitable as one well-chosen word describing a body part or physical act.

But, for me, a promise is a promise. Soon after making this resolution, I amended it to excuse myself in cases of muttering.

I mean, a guy's only human. One day in March, one such muffled comment was overheard by my daughter.

"That's one," she said rather coldly.

"I'm not counting it," I said. "You were eavesdropping on a mutter. You should be ashamed of yourself."

Noticeably unashamed, she has since sharpened her listening skills to where nothing louder than telepathy will escape her ears.

Understand that I am not doing this to prove I am a better person than the raw, cursing and totally honest folks I encounter. I'm doing it mostly because I've always been complimented on my vocabulary, and 171,476 clean words should be enough to get a guy through any day.

If not, the solution is probably less talking, not specifically dirty talking.

It is obvious that David Ortiz did not make this new year's resolution. His remark at Fenway nonetheless provided my toughest test yet of avoiding totally audible curse words.

In the eighth inning that day, a media colleague asked me what Ortiz had said to prompt all the commotion. Rather than call a hasty meeting of the one-person ruling committee that consists of myself, I told him it was the "F-word" and hoped that was sufficient.

I also indicated that of approximately 36,000 people in the house at the ball park, he was probably the only one who didn't know. As he walked away, I swear I heard a mutter-swear come from his direction.

As far as I'm concerned, the resolution lives. I make no promise that it will last the full year, let alone forever, which is the overall goal.