So, as expected Deepika you have blamed the director of ‘My Choice’ video for the controversial words in the video that had so far earned more flak than any accolades. Yeah, men are always there to put every blame on and probably men like Homi deserved it, who knows?

You claimed in the above report that you didn’t agree to a few lines in the script but also didn’t want to interfere with Homi’s creativity.

Creativity? Really!! Are women’s rights or social issues creative issues or you are saying there need to be new inequalities discovered in order to create new craze for equality, without really meaning anything? That is my dear little and immature brains- is creating a gender war in purest form.

Also, if Homi has actually forced his creativity on you, I wonder when did men start telling women what to demand their empowerment. Isn’t it clearly a chauvinistic idea that Homi has forced on you? Moreover, why did you have to accept HIS choice as yours?

I am also wondering, from when did actors and especially superstars like you started agreeing to everything that a director or the scriptwriter says. It is a known fact in the industry that stars change scripts when they feel like and many directors get no CHOICE but to agree to those changes. In case of ‘My Choice,’ it is highly unlikely that a superstar like you would have just followed a lesser known director’s choices.

Homi, you have also come out in the open bashing the audience who criticized the video and referred to them (I am one of those who has written against it) as narrow minded and averse to women equality, as you clarified that the 2.5 minute ‘My Choice’ video can’t take care of a complex issue like equality. Really Homi? If it can’t then why was it needed to be published under #VogueEmpower? If it was not aimed at addressing the issue of Women empowerment then why did you have to talk about women’s sexual choices alone? Why didn’t you talk about cooking or taking care of a family as their choice? If sex outside marriage or giving birth to fatherless babies are women’s choices then they can have much better choices respecting men as well. No?. Nah..These are too old-fashioned ideas, right?

Now Deepika and Homi, as a staunch critic of feminism and your video, too; I probably fall in your category of regressively sexist, but I fail to understand why Deepika has said that she wanted to address a global issue of women empowerment when Homi, you said, words or actions spoken in the video were merely a list of women’s choices. Oh really, if it had nothing to do with women empowerment then why did Deepika, you had to say this in another interview?

What do you really mean by addressing women empowerment and not really advocating that people to follow what you have said? Also, the need of accepting the consequences for all choices one makes comes now in your defense but why was your video silent about that?

By speaking out, you have made it clear to everyone that when the video bounced badly on social media immediately it became a casual video without any real message. Oh, wait! But Deepika said she wanted to address a global equality issue right?

We see the same thing portrayed in Deepika’s latest movie Piku as well. Have sex when needed to show independent empowered woman. These are the women who call men as rapists or ask for child support or maintenance as per their convenience. Favorable consequences for any woman right? Or it was probably another conspiracy of the Male director and scriptwriter (or cameraman or liftman, or security guard of the studio) of Piku?

And Homi, if you are so bothered about women’s choices, will you send your wife to other men for enjoying her sexual choice? Probably you wouldn’t, right?

Even if you do, (I hardly have any faith in your moral values at this moment) a regressively sexist person like me will not. Because for me first thing valued in a relation is trust and when that breaks there remains nothing.

So dear Bollywood players, keep your crooked ideas of equality to yourselves. You do not have to force them on common Indians, they are happy with the choices they have or probably they don’t. Because, India has worse issues like hunger, unemployment or homelessness rather than sexual oppression. Your promotion of such crooked ideas will only aggravate our real problems, break our families and will create bastard children rather than empowering anyone. The moment we all start talking about our selfish individual choices, the social fabric will break. Probably your little brains will not understand this. But it will be better if you stick to what you do best – acting, rather than what you don’t know or care nothing about.

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29 comments

Before reading your passionate article – I never knew the beautiful Deepika existed.

Having said that…Deepika seems to be little more than a pretty puppet, who will say and do whatever her puppet-master commands. She’s just a trained circus pony who jumps through the Ring Master’s hoops, in order to appease the audience and get a carrot. I am not sure she knows any more than the average person, but it is clear that somewhere along the line she lost her sense of shame.

The world would be wise to remember that a beautiful face is the perfect camouflage for an evil mind and lecherous spirit – little wonder this beautiful woman is being used to carry such an ugly message.

Most educated people are brainwashed idiots. They worship the celebrities and hence accept all the values that they enforce. Not, realizing that they are mere puppets. I too belonged to the crowd and probably still do. But now I am questioning things and becoming more aware.

Just so you know, I looked at Deepika a little more closely, and found her to be quite lovely. It is my opinion that she should be regarded as one of the world’s most beautiful women.

Unfortunately for Deepika, beauty is only skin-deep, whereas ugly is to the bone.

It is truly a sorry state of affairs when people make value judgments (regarding the worth of an individual) based solely on the configuration of one’s epidermal layer. If Deepika’s epidermal layer and bone structure were adjusted (ever-so slightly) – we would not be having this conversation now. It never ceases to amaze me how shallow humans can be.

If someone asked me to define the message behind Homi and Deepika’s short video on female empowerment, I would have to tell them it is a promotional advertisement for moral relativism, marital infidelity, narcissism, lechery, licentiousness, risky behaviors, social irresponsibility, abject selfishness and a call for sexual promiscuity.

Holy Scripture is very clear that when a man and woman marry and subsequently consummate their marriage – they become ONE flesh before God. There is no “my body…my baby…my decision…my choice”!!! When a man and woman marry…it should be “our body…our baby…our decision…our choice”!!!

Holy Scripture also stipulates, “Let no man put asunder what God has brought together,” yet this is precisely what Homi and Deepika are trying to do. Like all social engineers and Pied Pipers before them – they are trying to segregate the bride from her groom, which kills the marital bond between a husband and his wife.

Moreover, I wonder if Deepika and Homi are willing to support all these empowered women financially, after their husbands divorce them on the grounds of infidelity, breach of marital contract and alienation of affection? It’s one thing for a woman to proudly boast that everything that she says and does is her “choice”, but what happens when those choices hurt other people, break-up homes and split-apart families? What happens when she lacks good judgment and things go horribly wrong? Who pays the dire consequences? If a woman gets to make decisions independent of her husband’s counsel – he should not have to financially support those decisions or bail her out of trouble when things go wrong.

On one hand, Deepika and Homi advocate that women should come to their own conclusions and make their own decisions – without their husband’s consent or without his knowledge, but they say nothing in their film like, “My decision…my choice…my problem…my nightmare.” Why don’t they advocate personal responsibility?

Perhaps, in the future, Homi and Deepika will make videos that are more fair and balanced. One idea may be to incorporate male actors saying, “My paycheck…my choice”, “My inheritance…my choice”, “My children…my choice”, “My pecker…my choice”, “My backhand…my choice”, “My lighter-fluid…my choice”. I dare say, that if we were all able to make irresponsible choices without fear of retribution, then this world would be a bastion for anarchy. There must be law and order, and that requires compliance from EVERYONE…not just men.

It seems to me that Homi and Deepika are preaching the virtues of autonomous freedom, without first laying down the frame-work of civic responsibility and personal accountability. In addition, they say nothing to women about shouldering the consequences of their actions alone, nor do they make any kind of societal “impact” statement, that would alert the good people of India, as to the possible “fallout” this social experiment may have across the land.

Deepika’s video really disturbed me, in fact, I felt violated watching it. Truth is, after hearing her message and seeing her parade around in this video, I no longer find her attractive. To me, she’s just another twisted sister who sports a pretty mask.

In any event, I just cannot understand how a woman, in her right mind, would think that it is wise, moral, decent, fair, just or right, to stay out until 4:00 a.m., without telling her husband where she is and seeking his approval beforehand, yet this was Deepika’s message. And, this is supposed to be good for women and somehow empower them?

What do they think women are…retarded children?

This social experiment is meant to destroy existing marriages and to prevent future marriages from occurring – by making women impossible to live with. No man in his right mind would agree to be with a woman who acts the way Deepika advocates. The only men who think this message is “hip”, are men who can’t wait to take advantage of these women.

This comment of mine is not related to this post of yours. However after reading a piece of news in TOI, Mumbai edition, pg.3 ; I was so agitated that I had to raise my voice here. This was a case of ‘Forced marriage of Men’.

A 32 year old hardware engineer from Vartak nagar, Thane, Mumbai was forced to marry a 25 year old woman. The two had relationship for five years in which they had got physical. However he ended his relationship and his marriage was fixed on 30th May to another girl. After learning this the evil woman threatened to file a ‘rape under pretext of marriage’ complaint against him due to which he had to cancel his marriage and marry her.

We mras should strongly condemn this stupid ‘rape under the pretext of marriage’ provision in law demand it to be repealed. This is based on a rubbish belief that when a man and woman have sex, a man gains something while a woman loses something. In fact both gain pleasure from this activity.

Just a oral promise of marriage should not be counted under law, just as oral promise of anything else is not counted. It causes forced marriage of men. Also it provides a weapon to women to exort money fro men.

Would be glad if you write a post on this issue of ‘Forced marriage of Men’ and stupid ‘rape under the pretext of marriage’ provision in law.

There is nothing like rape under the pretext of marriage.There is only sex and sexual pleasure before marriage.While it is upto a person himself/herself to indulge in it, crying rape when relationship breaks is nothing but laughable to say the least.If I say , I will marry you, let us indulge in some sort of sexual activity before marriage to some woman, will that woman readily agree to sex.Rather I would be branded a molester /harasser /stalker by the entire media and the next day I would end up in jail while the people will be demanding my castration.So it is only because some woman likes a ‘particular’ man of her choice and is ‘sexually’ attracted to him that she commits/indulges.If she holds marriage so important and sacred to her that she would not want to have sex except with the one who she wants to marry/or have married why doesn’t she withhold herself till marriage? .And by the way who is putting a shot gun to her head and asking her not to do so.Rather she is somebody who gave in to her inner cravings and decided to seek.This is nothing but treating women like brainless bimbos who would offer sex just because some one says “I will marry you”.An analogy.If I say to some woman “go jump off the cliff ” or “beat somebody” I shall marry you , would she do the same?.Then why only she is “partcipating(not offering )” in sex in case somebody is promising marriage and not doing anything else (like jumping off the cliff ).And already “The Supreme Court Of India” itself has declared that such a happening is not Rape but only “Criminal Breach Of Trust” which in itself is debatable (Not to hold the court in contempt) .Yes, if a promise has been made on some promisory note or a legally binding contract then it is breach.In case a woman breaks her relationship and then plans to marry somebody would that also be considered Rape under promise of marriage ?.These gendered definitions are nothing but a way of trapping men in the cage of marriage. (:).

After years of observation, studying the history of his people, and reading all the classics – a wise man came to a startling conclusion: “There is always a price to pay for pussy.”

Please understand that the “Pussy Principle” is an undeniable law of nature and a force to be reckoned with, but if a man is not willing to pay the price of admission – then he should keep his rocket in his pocket and go in peace.

There was a time, not too long ago, when I was regarded as a “hot commodity” within female circles. In fact, it was not uncommon for me to be propositioned for sex – especially by single mothers, who seem to have lost their subtlety along with their self respect.

Be that as it may…I never accepted any of their offers nor did I make any promises that I was not willing to keep. I even dated a virgin who offered me her body in exchange for a promise of marriage. As soon as she found out I was an honorable man and my word was as “good as gold”, she sought to entrap me with sex.

This manipulative tactic did not have the desired effect she was looking for, because I ended my relationship with her shortly thereafter. What she failed to realize is that I am a man of principles, who is looking for a woman of virtue and a heart that’s true – not a sexual conquest.

Unfortunately, most men have no honor, therefore their word holds little value. These are the same men who think a woman is nothing more than a life-support system that houses, nourishes, and sustains…a vagina. These men also believe that the gift of sex can be practiced by married couples and immoral reprobates alike. When things go wrong for these men…I feel no pity. To me, they are no better than rabid dogs, who deserve to be shot at sunrise and put out of their misery.

If men held females to a higher standard and expected them to be virtuous, chaste, and decent – we wouldn’t be having this problem today. Over the years, America’s fathers lowered the standards of conduct and demanded less from our mothers, and now we all suffer because our mothers, brides, daughters and sisters have, not only met those lower expectations, but have exceeded them.

It seems the women of today are long on licentiousness and short on virtue. In fact, it wasn’t long ago that American women were forced to be more discerning and had to use greater sexual discretion, because they often had to marry whomever they “slept” with and would be required, in many cases, to stay with the disreputable man for the long haul. Nowadays, all the negative stigmas associated with divorce have vanished, while new incentives have emerged. Women are now free to “sleep” with whomever they want, whenever they want, because there are virtually no consequences for her moral lapses or poor judgment, hence she really has nothing to lose and everything to gain.

My goal is to reflect godly principles – not traditional or conservative mores.

“We need to be liberal” – Roshan

No, my friend, what we need to be is moral and decent, so we can show females the way.

Now, if you want to be “liberal”, then you can go your way and I’ll go mine. Just remember that liberal men deserve the company of liberal women – women who wrap themselves in the cloak of liberalism and drink from the tainted waters of feminism.

“There is nothing wrong in pre-marital sex” – Roshan

Is this a personal opinion, skewed observation, vain hope, wayward belief or just wishful thinking?

I have to agree with you on so many points.But if incase if indeed it is wrong to have sex before marriage, then it is wrong for both.Then why only men are being punished for having sex before marriage?.Just because he promised to marry and did not marry?.Women are not too naive these days to lay down with somebody because they “orally promised” to marry her.Yes , such men are completely sordid but calling them criminals ??????.The point is , when someone ( a woman) knows something is wrong (pre marital sex ), then the law is believing them to be so stupid or naive that it is Ok for them to indulge , but it is the man that has to hit the prison for not marrying after sex.Would a woman meet the same fate in case she breaks her promise after having sexual intercourse.These are the days where woman are conspiring to snatch men’s rights in the disguise of feminism.Such nonsense laws have to be done away with. (:).

The most important principle of morality is not to impose your morals on others. Whatever morals you have should be applied to your own life not to other’s lives.

The law of ‘rape under pretext of marriage’ imposes traditional and conservative morals on men and that is why it is wrong. Just because a person believes in some different morals than yours, doesn’t mean you can label him criminal.

Further more you cannot confine a person in any relationship under the threat of jail sentence. If some man is forced to stay in relationship or marry a woman UNDER THREAT OF JAIL SENTENCE, then that relationship or marriage has NO MEANING. Therefore this law of ‘rape under pretext of marriage’ must be scrapped immediately.

I would like to use your own words against you in order to make a point:

“The most important principle of morality is not to impose your morals on others. Whatever morals you have should be applied to your own life not to other’s lives.” – Roshan 5/25/15

I find this quote interesting, because (just yesterday) you had judged and decreed that I am “too traditional and conservative” and “need” to change my personal constitution from traditional conservatism to liberalism. Your exact words were:

“You are too traditional and conservative in your outlook. Being mra doesn’t mean that you need to be conservative. We need to be liberal.”

Roshan, I have never met a “liberal” who did not want to impose his/her will on others, thus forcing everyone to come into compliance with his/her world-view. In fact, I have never met a liberal who wasn’t willing to break or twist all laws, rules, regulations, principles or moral codes in order to shape the world into her likeness. Be careful, my friend, that you are not guilty of the same.

I maintain that if a man’s actions do not lead to a viable solution…then he may be part of the problem.

Thank you for your kind words and I am glad we are on the “same page”.

Indeed…any time one partakes in sexual relations outside the confines of marriage – one is guilty of fornication and has therefore offended our Heavenly Father, who gave sexual intimacy to a groom and his bride…as a marital gift.

To engage in sexual relations, outside the marital union, is to steal from God and incur His wrath – by taking a pure and precious gift and desecrating it before His holy eyes.

This treachery also robs a girl of her virtue, value, and self-respect, while ensuring that her future groom will never know the deep satisfaction, delight, pride, and pleasure of having a virtuous, pure, chaste and decent bride as his wife – whose faithfulness is beyond question.

It is sad to say, but all-too-often a groom receives a bride who has been conquered by another – a bride who has suffered a shameful indignity from which she will never fully recover. As a result, what the unsuspecting groom often receives, as a result of his bride’s promiscuity, are “tainted goods” – a woman with a checkered past, sordid secrets, and a host of unresolved issues, which will inevitably rear their ugly heads throughout the course of his marriage.

If the groom is lucky, he will escape from any sexually transmitted diseases that she may have contracted earlier, but he certainly will not escape from her bitterness, remorse, guilt, and shame…which she will transfer onto him, as her soul strikes out in anguish.

Ridwaanahmed, of course you are right to think that moral codes and laws should be enforced equally between the sexes. As we say in America, “What’s good for the goose, is good for the gander.”

Please believe me when I say that I am trying my best to understand your liberal viewpoints, but when you make contradictory statements such as, “I am not imposing my liberal morals on you. I just advised you to be liberal” – it confuses me all the more.

“By the way there are two types of sex outside marriage. One is when you aren’t married to anyone. And there is nothing wrong in this. Other is when you are married. This is wrong.” – Roshan

Roshan, studies have shown that people who sleep around prior to marriage are far more likely to have extra-marital affairs during their marriage, so “premarital relations” is a self-defeating concept. Please understand that a lecherous spirit and a cheating heart do not abate simply because one signs their name on a wedding certificate and places a ring on their finger. I will even go as far as to say that those who partake in sexual relations prior to marriage, have already cheated on their spouse.

In fact, the foundation of the behavioral sciences is the understanding that, “The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior.” This is to say that a building is only as good as its foundation. If the foundation is faulty, the building cannot withstand much pressure before cracking at the seams and falling to the ground. Now consider that 60% of men and women cheat on their spouses and you can see my point. To say that there is nothing wrong with premarital sex is to close one’s eyes to the truth.

“I felt really sad that you don’t feel the pain of men who are booked under ‘rape under pretext of marriage’ and forced to marry that evil woman.” – Roshan

Guilty as charged! I do not feel sympathy for men who enjoy casual sex outside of marriage or make spurious promises to women in order to get “laid”. With your right hand you rail against the irresponsible and moronic movement of feminism, but with your left hand you seem to advocate moronic and irresponsible behaviors of men. I may be wrong, but it seems you are advocating double standards. Please advise.

Deat CJ,
I think the point Roshan Durve is driving home seems to be regarding coercing men into marriage because they orally gave an oath to women.While we may make or break promises, the fact of the matter is such vague promises in the air have no legal validity unless they are made on a contract . While I may say as a man of age and wisdom you are right in condemning this out of marriage antics of men and women, but I suppose you are well aware of the prevailing promiscuity. From your viewpoint it is indeed reprehensible to entice a woman into bed for sexual pleasure promising to marry.This is not being debated.But what is being discussed is what can or cannot be legislated as a penal offense.In the language of the law promises exchanged between couples when in relationship hold no legal sanctity unless they are made on some piece of paper which has legal value.But CJ don’t you think such woman who gets cosy with men based on verbal promises are adding to the problem of breakdown of the ‘Godly institution’ of marriage.Aren’t these woman putting aside honourable men who who are upholding the ties of kinship through marriage by not giving promises of marriage in exchange for sexual favours.So don’t you think women should own responsibility for the choices they make with their body?.Shouldn’t they made equally responsible for the mess they are creating getting carried away with their juvenile innocent passions?.Who is imposing upon the woman to BELIEVE the lying schemer?.Their faith should be in the marriage and the person who married them.Not the one who is yet ought to marry her.There are many men who sacrificed a major part of their life to pursue one woman hoping they would marry her but became dejected when they came to know the ‘angelic and sinless’ woman was engaged in another affair parallely or has already planned to marry some other man only for money or has dumped the man for no good reason all the while creating vain hopes in the man of a future with him.This has nothing to do with my personal experience but I have witnessed a few such instances.So don’t you think such woman are to be held responsible for their promises they make just like men.And by the way love is the binding factor of any relation especially marriage.Do you think such a forced marriage (under the threat of prison) will be successful and enduring.Don’t you think it is against the norms and rites of marriage where one is supposed to wholeheartedly accept and utter the words of acceptance [ words spoken by either spouse where each speaks of honest will (without compulsion) to marry the other] during the marital ceremony.As Prakash Padukune’s daughter (Deepika Padukune) puts in the video above “My Body :My Choice” let us MRA’s loudly say “Ohh yeah;YOUR body:YOUR choice: ………YOUR “RESPONSIBILITY” tooooo.”.Peace.

I appreciate your reasoned response and will try to dissect your articulate essay…one point at a time. The next few paragraphs I cut and pasted from a comment I posted on “Debate…How Men Should Divorce” (about one month ago). I hope it adds clarity.

Samuel Comyn published “The Law of Contracts and Promises Upon Various Subjects…” in 1826. This is important to know, because it effected England, Canada, America as well as India. This lengthy book was comprised of major legal theorists regarding various subjects pertinent to American and British law.

Please read the following judgment from a court magistrate (1824) who was confronted with a lawsuit filed by a man, hoping to seek compensation from his fiance for breaking their pre-marital contract, when she upped and married another man, breaking their written agreement, and leaving without granting him just compensation as provided by law. A law that had been successfully utilized by women.

The Judge ruled:

“For the law doth not intend that the man is advanced by marriage; and therefore such a promise of marriage to him is of no consideration in law, and by consequences, no action can be founded thereon. But it is otherwise where a man promiseth to marry a woman, because in the eye of the law, marriage is an advancement to the woman.”

So, in the eyes of the British aristocracy and through their misguided code of chivalry, marriage is intended to help advance a woman throughout her life, whereas it is not intended by law, intent, or purpose – to be of any benefit to man. In fact, men are of no consideration at all. Perhaps this will help to explain the horrific sex biases and gender inequalities that we see in the western world and India today.

Ridwaanahmed, my friend, you then ask:

“CJ don’t you think such woman who gets cosy with men based on verbal promises are adding to the problem of breakdown of the ‘Godly institution’ of marriage. Aren’t these woman putting aside honourable men who who are upholding the ties of kinship through marriage by not giving promises of marriage in exchange for sexual favours. So don’t you think women should own responsibility for the choices they make with their body?.Shouldn’t they made equally responsible for the mess they are creating getting carried away with their juvenile innocent passions?”

Of course, the manner in which you skillfully worded these questions – I have no choice but to agree with you. Indeed, women should be responsible for their decisions, choices, and actions. Of this, there can be no doubt. But, having said that, let me go on record by saying that I will render no sympathy to a man who defrauds a woman with empty promises, in order to dishonor her sexually.

In the same likeness, I do not pity a woman for being defrauded by such a man, when her actions were equally despicable. When a woman agrees to trade-in her very essence for the promise of a dishonorable man – she has already dishonored herself and has no one to blame but herself. Because she is the one who sold her precious gift on a vain hope and dream, she should live out her days (alone and in shame), while he should be shot at dawn.

As you can see, I place the larger burden on the man, because I do not believe the average woman has been given an equal degree of discernment and reason (by her Creator), which hampers her ability to render judicious decisions or come to wise conclusions.

You then go on to say:

“There are many men who sacrificed a major part of their life to pursue one woman hoping they would marry her but became dejected when they came to know the ‘angelic and sinless’ woman was engaged in another affair parallely or has already planned to marry some other man only for money or has dumped the man for no good reason all the while creating vain hopes in the man of a future with him.”

Perhaps I should tell you that this very thing happened to me (ironically, by an Indian woman)…so you are preaching to the choir. She led me on, made me promises, then up and married a wealthy Indian – all-the-while feeding me with a consistent diet of false hope. She had me so confused, I didn’t know if I was coming or going. The hardest thing I have ever had to do…was to walk away from her. Oh, how I loved her!!!

In closing, part of the challenge that Indians face is that India considers marital discord and matrimonial matters as criminal offenses – instead of civil issues. Perhaps, in the future, India’s courts will become less hyper-vigilant and more fair-minded…as they try to administer justice.

CJ,
it’s no use explaining him.It’s men like you and me who understand it. It’s us and should be us who manipulate the bigger public into playing to our tunes. You know the old church stlye? Harsh and brutal but solid and long impacting. Churches did wrong in past but they upheld a very strong society.

One thing, don’t waste time retorting to these guys. These guys are manipulable idiots. Put up a vagina before him and he will do what you say to fuck it up. Slaves of Vagina.