Thursday, October 29, 2009

...Phrases that Annoy me but Shouldn't because they are so Commonly Used so why Would Anyone Actually Care? Volume I: "Vast Majority." Majority is vast. That is the meaning of the word majority. It means most. Basically you are saying the majority of the majority. Its redundant. I urge everyone to cease. My fragile psyche thanks you.

...Really? The pilots overshot an airport by 150 miles because they were using a laptop? I mean, come on, if you can't multitask while looking at porn, you need to seriously re-evaluate your life.

...Is there a more hit or miss band than the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Their songs are either incredibly good or unbearably bad. There is no in between.

...Shouldn't the NFL change how they set the Monday Night Football schedule? There is no excuse for ever showing a game that involves the Redskins. You're telling me they wouldn't be better off setting the Monday night game a week, or even two weeks in advance? Name one person who would rather watch Redskins vs. Eagles instead of Vikings vs. Steelers. You can't do it. Having adjustable schedules can't be that hard for television.

...Would you rather attend a Nickelback concert or stick a fork in an electrical outlet? I think the answer is pretty obvious.

...I have beef with College Humor's Cute College Girl of the day. There is a difference between "cute" and "hot" - as every guy knows. The problem with Cute College Girl is sometimes they have girls that are "cute" and sometimes they have girls that are "hot." (And sometimes neither.) I feel like College Humor should do a better job of distinguishing this. If the girl is actually "cute" then, fine, call her the Cute College Girl. If she is hot then she should be Hot College Girl of the day. If, however, the girl isn't up to standards then it should say "Mildly Attractive College Girl" and I'll know to skip those days.

...What do we have here? A movie this year that may actually be good? That can't be can it? No. Or can it? I'm so bemused...

...What is the appropriate distance when deciding if you should hold the door for someone who is walking behind you? Whenever I'm in that in between stage of should I hold the door for this person or not, and I choose not to, I wonder whether they are thinking "why didn't this ass hole hold the door for me?" And, if you are wondering, I absolutely think that about people who don't do so for me. If I am just a couple steps behind you, and you let to door shut on me, I will immediately judge you as an ass hole. And just remember first impressions tend to stick. I'm not asking for a full on open the door and let me walk in first, but at least give me the extra hard door shove so it stays open for me as I walk through. It's common courtesy.

...I hate when people add letters to words that aren't supposed to be there. It's espresso, not expresso, especially not exspecially, and don't even get me started on supposedly vs. supposebly. The prime example of this was when Dunbar from "Real World: Australia" went on some giant rant about an espresso machine – except he pronounced it "expresso." He probably said "expresso" twenty times in five minutes. This happened like two years ago and it still drives me crazy.

...How can this possibly end well? And how can the Cardinals possibly think it is a good idea to bring more steroid scrutiny upon Albert Pujols? He's the only hope for a clean home run champion right now. You really want to bring in the former king of steroids to teach him? That's a good idea? You might as well just get him a BALCO membership and call it good.

...Why is that every TV station decides they need to pimp a terrible show during the playoffs? First it was Frank TV, then it was Lopez Tonight, now it is the Wanda Sykes Show. Frank TV was mercifully cancelled, and Lopez Tonight and the Wanda Sykes show are inevitably headed for the same fate. Please stop pimping shows nobody wants to watch.

...Halloween is great because as you get older you have all the Halloween parties and girls in slutty costumes. And yet, the best part of Halloween will always remain the fact that everybody gets to dress up and return to their childhood innocence for one night. Ok. That's not true. The best part of Halloween is the slutty costumes.

...This is my last post of the week because of Halloween. I will be spending the weekend dressed as Crash Davis and drinking beer. Happy Halloween to all, and remember don't eat anything with a razor blade in it.

2 comments:

However, I must disagree with your discussion of vast majority. Majority merely means 1 over half. If you have 100 people, 51 would be a majority. Vast means large, so you would have substantially more than 51 to meet that definition. I think that vast majority is a legitimate phrase.

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I started this site as a a place to write mostly about sports. However, as a self proclaimed expert on pretty much everything, I will attempt to create something beyond just sports. Yes, it will be sportscentric, especially Minnesota sports, but I will delve into other topics, as well. Because, let's be honest, there really is more to life than just sports.
As for my my personal background, I was born and raised in Minnesota; so yes, I have a funny Northern accent. My lifelong crusade includes taking part in a joyful dog pile and champagne shower. Preferably this will occur for celebrattory reasons but I'm not too picky about specifics. It just looks like fun. I mean, who doesn't want to take part in a champagne soaked man pile?