CNN decides to go all in against Trump and has their front page lead with nothing but "analysis" and opinion. They start their slide into oblivion by starting a 72 hour marathon discussion about whether Trump allegedly used the phrase "Teepee in my bunghole" and how it is proof he hates Native Americans.

#Metoo goes all in and takes down Bill Maher, Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart and Chris Rock all for having said or done offensive things to women. Additionally someone finally remembers Jimmy Kimmel actually hosted a patently offensive show called "The Man Show" for 14 years where he did nothing but make sexist jokes and objectify women. ABC has him fired for this "revelation" and he is replaced by Conan O'brien who is also immediately fired for having growled and leered at every woman who ever came on his show. Conan is replaced by a turnip which is fired for still being a bit too phallic.

Trump announces that over a trillion dollars in overseas profits will be repatriated to the United States for investment, profit sharing, bonuses, hiring and so on but intentionally misspells repatriated so that the news media can spend two weeks discussing his mental fitness and probable dementia.

High Tax Blue states make it illegal to advertise or engage in the business migration services that help low tax neighboring states to poach their highest income residents as the new Trump tax plan takes effect. State border checkpoints are also beefed up in an attempt to limit outward migration to other states as they begin inspecting and forcing all moving trucks and vans to turn around. They deputize all state employees to report anyone attempting to migrate out of their states.

Blue states politicians fight a losing war to keep a straight face as they discuss the legality of sanctuary state status and voluntary mandatory charitable contributions to their state treasuries.

Trump follows his doctor's advice and loses 20lbs. He even publicly steps on a scale and it shows him weighing 219lbs. MSNBC and CNN begin a three week investigation into the department of weights and measures while accusing Trump of body and fat shaming millions of Americans.

While praying for a 72 year old Trump to pass away in year 2, 76 year old Joe Biden and 77 year old Bernie Sanders actually do pass away leading to yet another level of opioid abuse and addiction in blue states.

CNN decides to go all in against Trump and has their front page lead with nothing but "analysis" and opinion. They start their slide into oblivion by starting a 72 hour marathon discussion about whether Trump allegedly used the phrase "Teepee in my bunghole" and how it is proof he hates Native Americans.

#Metoo goes all in and takes down Bill Maher, Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart and Chris Rock all for having said or done offensive things to women. Additionally someone finally remembers Jimmy Kimmel actually hosted a patently offensive show called "The Man Show" for 14 years where he did nothing but make sexist jokes and objectify women. ABC has him fired for this "revelation" and he is replaced by Conan O'brien who is also immediately fired for having growled and leered at every woman who ever came on his show. Conan is replaced by a turnip which is fired for still being a bit too phallic.

Trump announces that over a trillion dollars in overseas profits will be repatriated to the United States for investment, profit sharing, bonuses, hiring and so on but intentionally misspells repatriated so that the news media can spend two weeks discussing his mental fitness and probable dementia.

High Tax Blue states make it illegal to advertise or engage in the business migration services that help low tax neighboring states to poach their highest income residents as the new Trump tax plan takes effect. State border checkpoints are also beefed up in an attempt to limit outward migration to other states as they begin inspecting and forcing all moving trucks and vans to turn around. They deputize all state employees to report anyone attempting to migrate out of their states.

Blue states politicians fight a losing war to keep a straight face as they discuss the legality of sanctuary state status and voluntary mandatory charitable contributions to their state treasuries.

Trump follows his doctor's advice and loses 20lbs. He even publicly steps on a scale and it shows him weighing 219lbs. MSNBC and CNN begin a three week investigation into the department of weights and measures while accusing Trump of body and fat shaming millions of Americans.

While praying for a 72 year old Trump to pass away in year 2, 76 year old Joe Biden and 77 year old Bernie Sanders actually do pass away leading to yet another level of opioid abuse and addiction in blue states.

Wow! How many tissues were sacrificed in the effort to create that fantasy?