What you're watching, should you be able to get through all 35 seconds without blacking out and waking up in the perfume section of a Dillard's, is MLB (or approximately MLB) stars Albert Pujols, David Ortiz, Jose Bautista, Bryce Harper, career.

A few weeks back, before the Cardinals pulled off the greatest two-game winning streak in my lifetime, I noted one of the provocative storylines centered around the impending free agency gold rush the offseason would present.

Alternate title: e'ouch
Before you can even type "Albert Pujols out 4-6 weeks following wrist injury", the Internet has turned itself inside out reacting to Kansas City Royal Wilson Betemit's Flash-on-Anti-Monitor run into Albert's glove, showing us that the world's most powerful living entity can feel pain, and that when he feels it, he does a weird little hop to show it.