So you’ve probably heard all about this crazy woman who calls herself Violent Blue and how she’s going around complaining that she tried to get me to pose for a photo with her and I told her that she was rude. Oh, and Katie snickered and rolled her eyes. You can see Ms. Porno’s version of what happened here on her Web site. If you want to know what really happened, read on.

Yes, she did want to have her photo taken with me. But first of all, come on. You don’t just walk up to me when I’m standing in some public place and just speak to me. Everyone knows that. Moreover, this was Macworld, and I’m standing on the show floor. Does that seem like the kind of situation where I’m looking to interact with people?

Worse yet, this woman touched me. She admits as much, saying she “lightly touched” my arm. In the civilized world this is known as a violation of personal boundaries, and according to our legal team (because yes we’ve had to bring them in on this) the “lightly touched” constitutes a form of assault. In fact Violent Blue is lucky we didn’t have her arrested right there on the spot.

Instead, I let her off easy. I told her, very politely, that she was rude. Then I very politely turned my back to her. Now she’s using this incident to play the victim and have her fifteen seconds of fame. Which, I guarantee you, was the whole plan from the get-go. It’s like Katie always says about the press: You can’t win. They’re out to get you, and whether you talk to them or ignore them they’re going to make you look bad. So you might as well just kick them in the nuts and stomp on their heads and move on.

Naturally good old Scoble got himself involved in the Violent Blue thing, since he was right there on the spot with his camera, filming away. Coincidence? I don’t think so. Supposedly there’s a video here on a site called Qik which I think should have been called Slo. Click play and wait ten minutes and maybe you’ll see the clip.

Meanwhile, we are considering a civil lawsuit against Violent Blue for assault and attempted battery plus defamation. I gave a police report in San Francisco last night and had photographs taken of the incredibly deep black bruise on my arm. More info as this develops.