Off Base Since 2005!
Mets commentary from the counter-intuitive to the unintuitive and all the intuitives in between.
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"Through the use of humor and gross inaccuracy...a certain truth can be gained." Rob Perri
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(pester me at:itsmetsforme@gmail.com or follow me @itsmetsforme on twitter)

Jeffy Jr. (who cannot be fired) made it clear that they had closed door meetings last night in the bowels of Ted Turner's Torture Chamber only to talk baseball, not to, you know, threaten anyone's employment status, while the media and blogeratti circled outside the door waiting for blood, twittering and tweeting and snarking. Of course these are the bossmen who continue to prolong the career of Gary Mediocre Joker so what kind of decisions do we expect? What frightens me is the reports I saw that they "talked baseball." What does Jeffy Jr. know about that? If that's the case, wouldn't it have made more sense to call a meeting with Vin Scully or Terry Cashman?

Fanboys will be excited to hear that the team is going to send Jjennryy Meija to the minors to train to be a starter, but perhaps less excited when the poor young thing is recalled in a month with the Mets still in last place and running a knuckle-baller, a juggler and a pitching mime out on the mound after Johan and Tongue. Yes, there are such things as pitching mimes. Fanboys can't decide whether managers/lineup orders don't matter at all, or whether they are the single most important thing, but they do know that the media is useless and RBIs and wins should not even be recorded because they are so stupid. And they do know they hate Jerry as much as they loved Fire Joe Morgan. Unfortunately Jerry's departure isn't going to make Carlos Beltran's knees walk through that door, nor will it hire on a few additional top drawer starters for the summer, wriggle out of those contracts with Oliver Perez and Francisco Rodriguez, or lift the general malaise hanging over this cursed club since Endy Chavez leaped over that wall.

If you think about it from the Wontpon's perspective, what's the use in firing Jerry? So they can continue to pay several managers to have this team consistently under-perform its supposed talent level/wither like fragile flowers/struggle against its GM's incompetence? The Wilpons probably realize 2010 is a washout and are scheming to put some fannies in those empty empty Citi seats, maybe with a big splash. Let's face it, it is unlikely the Mets will get out of the NL East basement (since every other team is better than them) much less catch the Phillies or qualify for wildcardness. Maybe they'll swing a trade for the mad jogger of Florida, who'd fit right in with this sad sack franchise.

In all seriousness, this game really showed me something...There are two types of baseball players when it comes down to crunch time: those who say, "I will" and those who say, "I hope I don't". People like Jeter, Pujols, Utley- they say "I WILL drive in this run and go home a winner.". People like David Wright say "I hope I don't strike out." And this is why those 3 have world series rings, and why Davey boy has to live with the fact that he shits himself and plays dead when the going gets tough. And this of course is not even counting people like Jason Bay, Jose Reyes, and Frankie Rodriguez who are about as soft as they come at ALL times...Delgado is the only legitimate ball player this team has seen since Piazza...I f*cking hate them...

This blog is meant completely and entirely in jest, unless you count the angst, and is not meant to offend anyone, unless you are a Br*ves fan. It's not affiliated with Sterling, the Mets, common sense, good taste, or anything really.