We celebrate reaching the 10th podcast with a round of (slightly self-mocking) applause, then introduce Deb and Konrad, apologising profusely for playing a track of Konrad’s in a shabby and distorted state on a previous podcast. Podcast #10 is Konrad’s right of reply, but first he has to explain his refusal to pee outside (as requested), which he does by revealing his deep-seated fear of peeing in public.

Jim Boots brings up the peeing antics of Rock Bitch and we segue beautifully into discussing the visual merits of Konrad’s band, the Lenzmen. In what has become a sadly recurring refrain in the Banalities, Konrad advises that he too may be moving to Melbourne, having lost his job as a conservator at the Australian War Memorial.

There is, according to Konrad, a lot of really good art at the Memorial, some of which never sees the light of day. Then Konrad confirms that he is living in a tin shed (not recommended for Canberra’s winter months) but he has a foundling Doberman dog to keep him warm at night. ‘But what’ says Jim Boots, ‘if it’s a two dog night?’

The recording of Konrad’s ‘Magdalene’ pre-dates the formation of the Lenzmen. It features a very ‘taut’ Johnny Jessop on drums. Jim reveals that he and Konrad originally met at a ‘Work for the Dole’ project whereat Konrad was writing up a series of interviews with Johnny and other local music luminaries. We move on to the off-stage antics of the Lenzmen digressing into whether a Baptist baptism resembles a wet t-shirt competition.

Konrad thinks not. Konrad is an atheist and doesn’t believe in Santa. He is afraid of death.
Deb tells us about a former flatmate who used to sluice out her sinuses in the shower with her own urine. Many pee anecdotes follow. And semen anecdotes. Then we play Shawn Sage, an obscure American country singer Johnboy likes because he sings about getting drunk and being miserable.

Deb wishes to promote Conway Savage (Bad Seed) who is playing at Toast on Friday 10th June (supported by Randall Blair from Podcast #8). We play Savage’s version of Nick Cave’s ‘Bring it on’. Then Johnboy does a quick review of the Revenge of the Sith. He likes it better than the other lot. He thinks the political metaphor is blunt but is perhaps appropriate. It’s a lot darker and grizzlier than one and two.

The first episode of the new Doctor Who series was shown the night before the podcast. Jim Boots recalls Kristie Bennett’s version of the Doctor Who theme with an acoustic guitar at a Pot Belly Bar ‘Go Solo’ competition a few years back. The sound guy (Mark Smith) cranked up the reverb and it sounded glorious. Johnboy had a girlfriend who resembled Billie Piper (Dr Who’s sidekick in the new series). He hopes she (the girlfriend) is older and fatter now. Konrad and Johnboy discuss the merits of different Dr Who’s for a while before Jim Boots calls the end of Nerd Time and requests a live song from Konrad who responds with ‘The Illustrated Man’.

Konrad admits to some bad habits, chiefly guitar and maraca abuse, then Johnboy brings up another Thai beauty pageant story, leading to some incomprehensible babble about ping pong balls before we request another song from Konrad and wind it up with the ridiculous post card challenge that no-one will ever answer, and even if they do, we’ll never find out about because Captain Pants won’t go to the post box. The address, in case you’re mad enough to want to send us a post card, is.PO Box 4332, Hawker, ACT, 2614, Australia. If you send us a card, you can, or so we said on a recent episode, ask us to do something on air and we will do it, whatever it isâ€¦

Rockbitch are actually out of the UK. They do live in a commune and they are heavily Wiccan. Ritual ceremonial sex all over the house and only one guy living there (lucky bugger). Yes, their shows were intense, they don’t play anymore though. SBS ran a doco on them and then again due to popular demand, which where I found out about it.