Look at this cover of this DVD. Just look at it. Crazy grizzly eating stupid teenagers. And the name! GRIZZLY RAGE. How could this movie not be 86 minutes of bad special effects and fake grizzlies disembowling people with Karo syrup flying everywhere.

Well it wasn’t. It was one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. We’re talking on par with Lake DeadThe Water Nun or Juiced!.

At least the movie gets into it quickly. Withint he first ten minutes the trigger is pulled. Four stupid Canadians (1 girl, three guys) hit a bear cub with their SUV. Mommy grizzly isn’t far behind and 19 minutes into the film the first casualty occurs. It’s just to bad you don’t see it. You just see a fake grizzly paw, then a guy fly across the screen into a heap on the forest floor with fake blood smeared on his face. He tries to crawl away, but then the grizzly grabs him, one paw by each leg, excutes a giant swing and then mauls him. You never actually see any violence though. You just see a Batman-esque POW, ZAP! or Ka-blooie! appear on the screen except it’s streaks of cgi blood. Awful beyond words.

The next death isn’t for 40 minutes later. It’s just talking until the hour mark. People crying and fighting and apologizing and gaonizing over how to get away from the grizzly. Finally one goes for help, and is slaughtered, but you don’t see him die either. It’s just “RARRRRRGH!” and blood. I can’t tell you how badly I was hoping to see on-screen bear induced eviseraction, but nope. Canada, stop making bad horror movies. You and England.

Finally we’re down to the last two humans who finally get their car to work except the bear pulls a The Great Outdoors, climbs up the SUV and then jumps up and down on it until it crushes the vehicle. The two survivors flee into a cabin, and the girl tricks the bear to going into the cabin, but then runs out and locks the door. HURRAH! THE BEAR IS TRAPPED IN THE CABIN, and the two wounded survivors crawl bloody and wounded towards freedom complete with happy ending music.

Then the bear kicks the door down rushes them both and slaughters both humans quickly. Shot of the bear growling with the words GRIZZLY RAGE shown on the screen. The end.

Yes, that’s really how it ends. Awful movie. I’d give it a 1/10 but it gets half a point since the bear kills everyone dead, which is quite rare in a horror movie.

WordPress database error: [Table './db97824_wp/wp_comments' is marked as crashed and last (automatic?) repair failed]SELECT * FROM wp_comments WHERE comment_post_ID = '1202' AND comment_approved = '1' ORDER BY comment_date

WordPress database error: [Table './db97824_wp/wp_comments' is marked as crashed and last (automatic?) repair failed]SELECT * FROM wp_comments WHERE comment_post_ID = '1202' AND comment_approved = '1' ORDER BY comment_date