humor: Diet Delights

Last summer, frozen food companies had trouble finding qood-quality
vegetables for processing. because of the dry weather. As a result,
many were culled but few were frozen. Hee, hee, hee.
There are Diets and There are Diets
* A diet is a weigh of life.
* It's something most of us do religiously: We eat what
we want and pray we don't gain weight.
* A diet is what you go on when not only can't you fit
into the store's dresses, you can't fit into the dressing room.
* One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike:
If you're thin, don't eat fast.
If you're fat, don't eat...fast.
* The problem with curbing our appetites is that most of
us do it at the drive in window of McDonalds.
* The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream
sundae is a spoon.
* The biggest drawback to fasting for seven days is that it
makes one weak.
* Above all, dieters are advised to avoid Pepsi, the pause
that refleshes.
* Sweets are the destiny that shapes our ends.
* Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
* The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat.
It's watching what other people eat.
* A diet is when you have to go to some length to change
your width.
* It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on
weight, it's the seconds.
* People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.
* A diet is the modern-day meal in which a family counts
its calories instead of its blessings.