Friday, October 23, 2009

Ups and Downs

I got a spanking a couple of nights ago because I just couldn't keep my mouth shut. Bo was really angry, but because our daughter was still up, he was forced to wait a while. Usually, that curbs most of his anger. He'll still spank, but we talk it out and everything is good again. This time, he was still really angry, and this was one of the hardest spankings he's done. Now. that's not the problem. I fully admit that I was being a real witch that night. If he hadn't spanked, I would have worried that he was ready to give up DD altogether. But, there was a problem...we didn't reconnect that night. For the first time, I felt alone and sad after a spanking. His anger was not gone either. There was no "I forgive you." It wasn't the first time I had wondered if DD was really going to work for us.

And then a new day dawned. And a new me and a new Bo. No, we didn't immediately talk things out. Things were still uneasy between us all night. But, in the morning, we were ready to talk, to listen, to forgive. Real domestic discipline isn't like a story. Sometimes, it's ugly, and difficult and scary. But, we have a real marriage now. We do take care of issues, get them out of the way, talk more and love each other for who we are. Finally, DD seems like a very real part of our lives.

3 comments:

I like what you say about DD sometimes being difficult and scary. It can come as a shock to newbies that DD isn't like the fantasy or like a story. You described perfectly what real DD can be like - not perfect, not all neat and pretty but real and gritty. Thanks for sharing this. It helps to know that we all face these things and can overcome them. Meow