#reverb 10: Day 8

Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.

This prompt is making my brain hurt.I just don’t know what to say.I don’t think that I am different.I don’t think that I ever wanted to be different.I think I have probably spent my life trying to make sure I am not different.I have spent my life trying to blend in.Because that isn’t as scary as standing out, being an individual.I don’t want people to notice me.I like to be quiet and alone.There is less chance of making a fool of myself that way.Of being stupid, offending someone, making myself feel small and frightened.

But, thinking about it I am different today than I was a year ago, two years ago, five years ago.I am less selfish.I am more understanding.I am more patient.I think of others before myself.I have better empathy.I have developed a conscience. I have learned what it means to compromise.I am braver.I am stronger.I believe in myself more.I think I am worthy.

So perhaps what makes me beautiful is not what makes me different from other people, but the differences between the person I was then and the person I am now. I know I am a nicer person. I know I am a better person. That spirit is what makes me beautiful, at least to myself.

I found this prompt really hard to write about so I just started and let it come. It has turned out quite different from what I expected but I think I like it.