Top 5 Side-Scrolling Beat-'em-ups on iPhone

Best ways to take on the thugs on iPhone

Wine clubs, gym memberships, and frequent moisturising might make you think you're civilised, sure. Let's face it, though: everyone yearns for a bit of a scuffle every now and then.

For those of us who have no desire to vent these primal urges on a drunken night out, an alternative outlet is recommended. And while side-scrolling beat-'em-ups aren't as popular as they were in the '90s, they're still the purest and funnest way to open a can of whoop-ass on a bunch of thugs.

So, let's consider the Top 5 side-scrolling beat-'em-ups on iPhone, and prepare to kick some digital botty.

*Downing ten cans of poor-quality lager prior to playing is entirely optional.

If Punch Quest were a street fighter, it'd be one that points over your shoulder then knees you in the kidney. RocketCat's game is ostensibly one of those trendy and inoffensive endless-runners. Dig a little deeper, mind, and you'll find an intense and finely layered scrolling beat-'em-up underneath. Sneaky.

Here's another side-scrolling beat-'em-up whose creator dares to reshape the genre for the touchscreen age. Rather than go to town on them there enemies via a clumsy virtual control setup, you initiate attacks here through various swipes and prods of the screen. It works surprisingly well.

Mika Mobile's OMG Pirates! looks like a Saturday morning cartoon, but it's every inch the beat-'em-up badass. Though the dev relies on those aforementioned virtual controls here, the game's simple and intuitive two-button setup and focus on timing make those 20-hit combos readily achievable.

Yes, this Mega Drive conversion is a little compromised 'thanks' to a less-than-optimal virtual control setup, but Streets of Rage 2 remains relevant because it's still one of the best side-scrolling beat-'em-ups ever made.

You wouldn't necessarily expect The Simpsons franchise to form the basis for an intense side-scrolling brawler experience, but The Simpsons Arcade is a surprisingly playable - and occasionally humorous - example of this. And who doesn't want to take control of a rampaging Homer? Exactly.