Mayim Bialik: My 4-Year-Old Is Officially Weaned

The Big Bang Theory actress Mayim Bialik, who also holds a PhD in neuroscience, announces that her 4-year-old son Fred has officially weaned from extended breastfeeding. The Blossom alum blogs about the experience on kveller.

“Well, nay-sayers, prepare to be proven wrong,” Mayim writes. “All of you snarky mamas who glared at me nursing my 3 1/2-year-old on the NYC subway, prepare to be amazed. And to all of my family and friends who wanted to chastise me about nursing a walking, talking, thinking, laughing little man named Fred, thanks for holding your tongues.”

She continues to talk about the weaning process.

“Because we did it,” she adds. “Fred isn’t going to nurse on his way down the wedding aisle or at his high school graduation. I didn’t need to break him of a “habit” and teach him “who’s in charge.” I didn’t need to set boundaries you thought I should have set when I didn’t want to set them.”

She adds: “Because we did it: Fred weaned.”

“Fred weaned this past Thanksgiving, exactly a year from his night-weaning Thanksgiving of 2011, which I initiated reluctantly–and as gently as I could, and days before I released the public statement that I was getting divorced,” she says.

“From the time that Fred night-weaned a year ago, he was nursing about once a day, but not always once a day,” Mayim continues. “Sometimes he’d go a few days without nursing. After night-weaning, he could nurse anywhere but in the bed, since it invariably made him think of nursing all night, which he did like a real champ for his entire happy milky life until he was 3. And I didn’t want to go back to that!”

“So just to sum up: I nursed Fred four to six times a night for three years,” she writes. “I pumped at work for Fred from the time I got the job on The Big Bang Theory when he was 18 months old until he was 3. I used La Leche League’s books How Weaning Happens and Mothering Your Nursing Toddler to gently test his growth and maturity and set reasonable boundaries for him. I didn’t nurse him literally anywhere, anytime, but I made sure to meet his needs and have mine satisfied as well.”

That is a beautiful piece. I clicked on the link and read the whole thing. If anyone else reading this has a few minutes they should read it all too. I don’t think she is crazy, I think she was just doing something that felt right to her. I think she knows it doesn’t feel right to everyone and that’s ok too. It’s a sweet story that I know her son will appreciate reading when he is grown up as well. Very touching.

SMH

There is still nothing that makes me believe a child over 2 needs to be breastfed esp not through the night. But to each their own. I will never do it but try not to judge. However l dont think anyone should be shocked to hear comments or even give glares if you are doing it publicly.

Anonymous

I couldn’t disagree more. I would be absolutely shocked to hear comments or see glares if someone was breastfeeding publicly. Mind your business.

SMH

A baby of corse not. A four year old? I def think so! And l always mind my business but l also am human and glare at things l see as odd.

Anonymous

You GLARE at things you see as odd? How bizarre.

Anonymous

People on the subway need to mind their own business. Breasts have been made into sexual objects when their purpose like any mammal is feed their young. If people have a hangup about it and continue to stare, that’s their problem.

society is to blame

if breasts aren’t sexual objects, how come mine turn me on!

arabella

There no need for a child over the age of 2 to be breastfeed.

Anonymous

Says Dr. arabella, of internet med school?

Anne from the Netherlands.

No, there is no NEED for a child over the age of 2 to be breastfeed. But it isn’t bad either. There is no reason why you can’t breastfeed your child at that age. I think it is sweet, we are just not used to see it anymore. I have fed my oldest child 1,5 years, and I had to quit because my son didn’t want to have it anymore. Every child is diffrent, every mother is diffrent. We should just respect each other.

NYCMommy

Anne- I totally agree with your comment.. However, when I first read I thought you breastfeed your oldest child until they did not want at AGE 15…. made me do a double take. 15 is a bit old. HA HA HA

Anon

Well sorry your husband still won’t take you back mayim.

hopper

What a good Mom!

Rose

She seems really defensive, and way too focused on what other people think of her. And I attempted to read her book, but I couldn’t make it through the whole thing because there was such a judgemental tone to it towards other people’s parenting choices. It’s ironic considering how upset she seems to be for being judged by others.

coco

ALREADY weaned at 4????

(sarcasm)

Louise

You have *NOTHING* better than that to be humouristic…?

coco

I think it’s better spending 30 seconds being humouristic and having a laugh about it, rather than spending days discussing dumb things..

Trish

Way to go Mayim! Always do what is best for your child. I was ridiculed and chastised endlessly and therefore weaned my daughter shortly after her third birthday. You sound like a great mom!

Gloria

Well any doctor will tell you that breast feeding a child after 2 is not needed… any nutrition they need at that point can be received from regular food… This extended breast feeding is a mother thing NOT a child thing… Spare me the “it’s there decision” … The child only knows what it is use to not what is best for them …
It is sad but I think her marriage did suffer from her attachment parenting….
Cause she had the babies in the bed with her and the constant breast feeding when are you alone with your husband ?
The thing is most mothers become insane over their children and tend to baby them … There was NO reason she needed medically to continue nursing her child … She did it for her own self reason ….

Melonie McCoy

That is a beautiful, wonderful story that made me laugh and cry…human mammals wean at an appropriate average of four years old…and yes, comfort and bonding is medically and emotionally necessary, so Gloria’s comment is naive.

Gloria

I could care less if you think it sounds naive … it can be an issue …. If the husband is not on board.. and often times the mother makes that decision… it use to be an old saying ” When a woman is dragging her kids into the bed… she does not want to be intimate ” that bedroom is a hubby and wife’s special place … not just for sex but other bonding and alone time … of course she will never admit that the parenting style she chose was an issue… but she did say in her book and the hubby and 1 child sleep in one bed and she and the other sleep in another …so they are not even sleeping in the same bed …
again kids are becoming to soft these days …. They need to learn how to be dependent …
You do not have to let a child “cry it out” but when a child is crying for no other reason then they refuse to go to bed.. you giving is a problem
UGGG this kind of parenting and many other modern forms is the reason most people hate having children and babies on planes and in restaurants

Denise

Well, to say that her marriage failed because of attachement parenting seems a bit far fetched.
We do practice attachement parenting to some degree. Our younger daughter was nursing until she was almost 3. Both of our children have always slept in bed with us, every single night until they were 6 and 4 years old. This was our choice as parents and even though it makes me cringe that people let their babies cry-it-out, i would never judge them for it. It is not something that was ever an option in our family, but it’s ok if it works for others.
We have been married 13 years and our kids are now 10 and 8 years old. Our marriage never suffered because of attachement parenting. We found time to be together without it having to be alon in our bed. You just make room for it in other ways.

SMH

If that was an agreement between you and your husband then it could work. Maybe Mayims husband never was fully for it and she did as she wished. Not saying this is the reason for a marriae fail bc she stated it wasnt but l def can see how it could be if both parents are not on the same page.

I dont know l love my bed and my sleep and love not having feet in my face or in my gut. For me personally the bedroom is for sex and sleeping none of which w
involve my children lol.

Anonymous

I breast fed my daughter till she 3 and a half and well I ended up getting a visit from Child Protective Services due to the breast feeding and I told them I was just about to start weaning my daughter from breastfeeding but I think it’s stupid for someone too actually call Child Protective Services on someone who is breastfeeding and it turned out that is my my parents who called them on me cause they confessed to making the report.

Devyn

Big whoop.

Anonymous

Big Whoop!!! WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM RUG MUNCHER? How would you feel if you was breastfeeding your child who was 3, 4 or 5 yrs old and you got a visit from Child Protective Survices because you was breastfeeding? Yeah believe me they will come around and reports to CPS would be made by people if you was breastfeeding your child that was over 2 yrs old!