Friday, July 29, 2011

Relationships, Relationships, Relationships...

Most of the time when people hear the word relationship...they automatically think about intimate relationships with others. Often, I would think the same way. As I continue growing, I look at all of my relationships...my friends, relatives, children, spouses, clients, even new relationships in development.

One relationship that has been sticking out lately is the" babymama/babydaddy" relationship. I pretty much was on my own raising my daughter the first 8 years of her life. My mother and grandmother helped and I am very thankful. However, there was no "father figure" around. As a young mother, I ended up bitter because I felt not only did her father abandon her but abandoned me as well. It has taken me a while to realize that he did what he felt due to past experiences with the mother(s) of his other children. It was up to me to show by my actions that I am not the past but the present, understanding what level of love there was between us and keep it moving. We are now in a place where there is much respect and love between the two of us. There are no expectations...if you gonna do, do, if not, keep it moving...but there will always be LOVE! Fast forward to present I find myself on "the other side of the game". Now, I'm seeing the experience through the eyes of a babydaddy...my husband. With the birth of our son, I find myself having some sort of flashback out of body experience...seeing myself in our son's mother (babymama). A woman that is so use to disappointment and negativity that she even creates it herself because that is what she is accustomed to...even if what is in front of you is love & truth...all she needs to do is open her eyes and see.

I've even had to realize in my business relationships, it's amazing what is revealed to you when you make yourself vulnerable, willing to be of service. I've dodged a "business bullet" to salvage a friendship, new friendships have developed with new business ventures and even a deeper relationship with current clients.

Why do we make it so hard to reveal ourselves....our true selves to each other? Why are we so afraid to be vulnerable and put our true feelings and emotions out there? This is something I had to ask myself and blossom into who I truly am at this moment. I have learned that you cannot push anyone to do what you think or want them to do, in YOUR world...it's OUR world...a unity not a separation. I heard something once that said, "Separation kills, unity is the survival of all humanity." It works much better if you just go with the flow...ride the wave...enjoy the rollercoaster...whichever figurative speech you choose to use. Once you begin, you will see the truth revealing itself in every moment of your life. Even the true attitudes of some reveal themselves to you in a way I honestly cannot explain, but is something to experience indeed. It's like I told my husband..."I think disclosure is happening as we speak, just in a manner we never expected..." We feel if something is to be revealed it has to be this huge production like in the movies...lol Bottom line: RELAX! Stop allowing illusions to hide the real you. You may be surprised who or what will show up in your life and/or who will leave your life so that your blessings can continue to flow as they should once you see the real you and not the illusion. If you are going through a "rough patch" at this moment, see that there is some truth being revealed to you. All you have to do is open your eyes and see. Once you see, you'll know what to do...trust your intuition! We are our toughest critic, it's true. If your relationship with you isn't working well, how do you think it's going to work with others (within any parameter)? Jerry Maguire almost had it, yet was a loving gesture (he got the girl...so cliche'), "YOU complete ME"...recognizing how complete you are as a human being, the way you are (perfectly imperfect)...you will realize that it's more "WE compliment each other", "WE are a team", "WE are family!" And to me, that's true unity!