Today I am a God. Tomorrow just a fat guy again.

My workload exploded today. Most my part-time employees returned and I was moving in nine different directions most the day. I had them doing paperwork, landscaping, picking up vehicles, left, right, north, and south. I came home on lunch and cut my grass and showered (I hate cutting my grass which is laughable considering what my job is). Tonight I have to cook, do homework with the kid, baths, and dishes since I’m a single parent tonight. Crazy. But I know I operate better than busier I am. Oh sure it makes me stressed, get shooting pains in my left arm and chest, and I tear someone’s head off once in a while at work/home, but I am happier the busier I am. Oh and I’ve been told that my the Director wants to sit down and go over a new project that I have no idea how I’m going to pay for or find the staff for.

There are some nights you just suck a big donkey dick. We had an experimental second raid group this Saturday night. (For you non-WoW players, you can only get “saved” to one raid instance a week per character). I won’t go into details (Secret: I don’t bitch about my guildies. If I have something to say to them I say it to them.) but I myself sucked when it came to raid leading. I can’t play other people’s character for them, but I should have put more effort into fixing what was wrong. My fuck up.

My muti rogue was kicking mucho ass though. God bless fights I can stand still for two rotations. My leet rotation is as follows…

Stab, Stab, Stab, Stab, Stab, Stab, Stabbity, Stab. I jump while doing it, cus I’m pro. I tried getting our Brazilian Shammy to jump while DPSing so his DPS could be leet, but he wouldn’t. Some people are just fail. (FYI he kicked my ass on the meters, but I looked better while DPSing). He had MUCH better gear. Yes my ego was bruised enough to mention that.

I DPS with an attitude. Oh don’t get me wrong, I’m the nicest guy I know (for a prick). I don’t flash damage recounts, I don’t talk shit, I interrupt, and try and help the raid out instead of myself. But I can’t help it. I play with a chip on my shoulder. Someone above me on the meters. Oh hell no, I’m gunning for you. I try and magically cram more global cool downs into my rotations, I stay focused and on target, and pound my keyboard like a jack hammer. I *know* that my Envenom crits when I press harder.

If the tank starts dancing around with a mob, I stick on it like glue. Let the Huntards and Mages stand way back there and go easy mode. Some of us have to work for our dinner. I stick my daggers in the mobs back and hold on for dear life. I am a rogue. I am a working man. Slice and Dice about to fall off and no energy? I will some into existence. Bang Rogue Viagra. When my Omen warning goes off it’s the sound of War Drums and that means to DPS harder!

Well. Not really. I’m pretty scrubby. But hey it’s a video game in a pretend world, why can’t I pretend to be a badass?

It’s weird. I don’t tank with that attitude. I’m very calm when I tank. Very confident. I do my job, get my raid through a boss, and move on to the next boss. But when I’m DPS is likes this whacko takes over and I’m all…

“Yeah baby yeah! I’m the Evil Midnight Bomber who bombs at Midnight!” (The Tick Cartoon in case you wondered)