Conservatives to stick to being posh white blokes

The Conservative Party are to stick to being led by posh white blokes with just the merest smattering of upper middle class totty for a bit of window dressing and of course to make the tea, as part of new moves announced today.

Speaking on this morning’s Andrew Marr show prime Minister David Cameron explained “When Baroness Warsi slung her hook we thought, who have we been trying to kid? It’s all very well pretending we like women, racial diversity and people from different backgrounds, but now it’s high time we went back to basics, and that means lots of posh white blokes, most of whom went to Eton running the country.

“The whole thing was in danger of turning into some sort of johnny foreigner ladies bazaar if you ask me. You might want to be governed by a cosmopolitan ladies’ excuse-me but we certainly don’t”

However Mayor of London and aspiring Prime Minister Boris Johnson said that discrimination based on colour, class, wealth or religion will serve no place in his vision for a new Britain. “It doesn’t matter whether you’re black or white, muslim or christian, posh or common,or male or female, everybody has the right to be governed by me and my public school educated white male friends. We’ll treat you all with equal contempt.” he promised.