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Funny satire stories about John Sergeant

The BBC is engaged in a search for the next loveable twit to take part in the 2011 Strictly Come Dancing.
The Inspector General of the Beeb announced there was only one other main criterion, besides being a loveable twit and that was that they cou...

In a heartbreaking tragic miscarriage of justice, John Sergeant has been BANNED from dancing in Europe for 25 years, for dance floor related crimes against humanity.
Under the circumstances a mainland UK ban was inevitable, but the full European...

Arlene Phillips, the Strictly Come Dancing judgess, is at the centre of a new controversy tonight, after it was revealed she has been suspended from the show whilst an investigation into her ugliness has been carried out.
Arlene, a Manchester Quee...

The ousted BBC Strictly Come Dancing contestant, John Sergeant, made his farewell appearance on the show tonight, and in a shock development, stunned viewers when he issued his dance partner, Kristina Rihanoff with a Proposal of Marriage.
Sergeant...

John Seargeant has left the BBC show 'Strictly Cum Dancing' despite being the 'people's champion' and kept in the show by the votes of the proletariat.
Broken Promises
Following a visit from the Mitchell brothers, who pointed out to John the di...

John Sergeant has quit the hit show Strictly Dancing. He told BBC bosses that he felt he was preventing people who could dance from winning.
After finishing bottom in every show, only to be saved by the viewers votes each time, the ungainly hippop...

John Sergeant, the Strictly Come Dancing contestant who sensationally bowed out of the show - or was kicked out, depending on who you believe - had some good news to spread this evening, when it was announced he is to front his very own BBC dance sho...

Portly Jo Brand looky-likey, John Sergeant, has stunned TV Execs by sensationally quitting top rated show Dr Who. The portly Jo Brand looky-likey has fled the country and is believed to be in hiding at a small villa on the Costa Del Sol on Portugal's...

Jonathan Ross, the disgraced lurid phone call fanatic has stepped in to save the BBC from a looming "Bloody Battle" between the judges and the British public on the now infamous Strictly Come Dancing TV programme.
Said a distraught Ross "I feel i...

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Holiday tips from Santa!

When interviewed, Santa clause was quoted saying "Remember, if you're going to jingle then please jingle all the way". So remember folks, Santa doesn't like a half-assed jingler.

Trump Names Sarah Palin as Chief of Staff of...

...the Upstairs Maid Crew for the White House!

Fidel Castro's Death Leads to 9 Days of Mourning

Trump's election is 22 days of mourning and counting.

Irish Priest Barred by Vatican

Controversial Irish Catholic theologian, Fr. Finnbar O'Murphy has been excommunicated by Pope Francis for declaring that "Jesus Christ did not want to suffer... for humanity or anything else."

Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

He thinks "The Deputy President," or even "President, Jr." would be acceptable though.

Mike Pence Doesn't Want to Be Called Vice-President Because He is Against Vice

The Deputy President, or even President, Jr. or would be okay though.

New Category in This Years Oscars

The new category is "The Dumbest Lyrics in a Musical".Fav is The Bodyguard where... Whitney Houston sings to Kevin Costner..."We both know I'm not what you... you neeeed..." What he needed was specs.

George W. Bush and Barack Obama Are Secretly Glad Trump Was Elected

They know that when Trump's term is over, no one will ever call THEM "Worst President Ever" again.

Thanksgiving Pardon

Today President Obama pardoned all the turkeys who voted for Donald Trump.

They will live out their lives standing in unemployment lines, waiting for Mr. Trump to Make America Great Again.

Trump Says He Forgot His Secret Plan to Defeat ISIS

"It's so secret I was afraid to write it down. But it'll come to me, I'm sure" said Trump.

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