In Dire Straits

Ever since Alana assisted Deidra with her condition, she had been getting much better! In fact, she was starting to emerge from her isolation to again explore Nardir, familiarizing herself with everything she had missed in her absence. The plague was still a threat suspended over her head, but she was no longer crippled with fear over her inevitable infection and death. She had taken to wandering the land around the lake, which was often teeming with wildlife. Today, she saw a group of young swans moving in tandem.

For whatever reason, Deidra was endeared by their fluffy patheticness and felt compelled to feed them, even if she was just fattening them up for the next opportunistic predator that bumbled past. She was in a magnanimous effing mood, okay, and she felt like appreciating nature today. She retrieved an apple which was laying in the grass. Deidra didn't have access to bread, but the curious swans nevertheless deemed the fruit an acceptable substitute. She dissected the apple into convenient little chunks and tossed them to the flock. A few of the younger swans waddled over to investigate, poking at the apple crumbs with their beaks. Success!

That was when she realized that she hadn't only attracted the attentions of baby swans. Deidra jumped in place, startled by a loud squawk coming from behind her, and whirled around to come face-to-face with a swan that was certainly bigger than herself. It squawked again and advanced, enhancing its imposing presence by extending its wings. Deidra took a step back to try and separate them before she realized that the flock of juvenile swans had finished their meal, and they were converging on her. Deidra was quickly trapped between the swans that were now clamoring eagerly for sustenance - sustenance they were more than willing to take from Deidra's flesh, were she not able to provide more delectable fruit.

"Shoo," Deidra hissed, trying to deter them. She was the big bad predator here, and she wasn't about to let herself get pushed around by some birds! A chorus of squawking rose from the throng, and one swan made a grab for the apple core, jabbing its beak into her leg like a wasp's stinger.

"Yeek!" yelped Deidra. Without thinking, she threw the apple core and hoped it would be enough to provide an opening. Fortunately, it distracted some of the juveniles, but the adult was transfixed and determined to ANNIHILATE. She could see the hatred in its beady eyes. And the harder she looked, she realized -- its beak was lined with teeth.

HOLY crap, ABORT. Deidra lunged through the broken circle of swans, the adult swan's beak swiping through the air like the tip of a spear. It followed in hot pursuit, and as it nipped at the tip of Deidra's tail, she realized the damn thing could move awfully fast for a fat hobbling bird. Deidra yowled again, evidently too paralyzed by the novelty of her predicament to react as a predator would.

Anyone that felt like tracing the commotion would happen upon a hell of a sight.

It was very easy for someone like him to become isolated and forgotten. It wasn't due to neglect from others, it was simply how he was. For the most part, he enjoyed his time alone; silently wandering the outskirts of Nardir. He did not bother anyone, and no one bothered him (he knew how to stay away and out of sight).

His people probably needed him, but he found it hard to find the motivation to actively help.

A scream nearby was the abrupt kick in the ass his motivation needed.

He was moving before he even realised, his chest tight and his pupils pinpricks, focused solely on reaching the source of the incident. His mind immediately grasped the worst conclusion; someone was likely being murdered, they were dying and he needed to get there as quickly as he could. What would he do when he did reach the dying woman? He wasn't quite sure.

He didn't get the opportunity to reflect on how stupid that conclusion was, for when he reached the troubled woman, she barrelled into him with enough force that it knocked his front legs out from beneath him, and he collapsed face first into the dirt. Everything had happened so fast that he didn't realise he was squashing the woman who was now trapped underneath him (he wasn't exactly a lightweight, especially for a dainty little thing like her).

Lets not even get started on the swan.

It had already landed a few hits on him in the chaos that was the 'Deidra Tackle', tufts of golden fur ripped from random parts of his body and blown away in the breeze.

Enough was enough.

Regaining his balance and slamming his paws on the ground, he lifted himself up and snapped his jaws at the large bird in a ferocious display. He hoped it was enough to scare the stupid thing off, if he actually had to try and chase it away he'd probably end up stepping all over the lady he was trying to help (A PRINCE DOES NOT STEP ALL OVER HIS SUBJECTS!!)

Thankfully, it did, the swan waddling away with victory honks, leaving the pair alone to reflect on what on earth had just happened.

It didn't occur to him that he should move away to let Deidra stand up, so he just peered between his front legs at her in silence for a moment.

ooc: permission to kick Zaniah in the balls was given by frost and i quote: "just kick him in the balls effing do it"

so uh?? cw for v frank descriptions of that happening

Fate would dictate that eventually, Deidra's unstoppable force would collide with its immovable object, and in this case, the immovable object happened to be poor, hapless Zaniah, brave Zaniah who heard her distress call and answered it like the knight in shining armor he aspired to be. Though to Deidra, Zaniah was nothing more than an indistinguishable golden blur, something she didn't realize she had been careening towards until the moment she barreled right into him.

He collapsed on top of her like she was a wrecking ball that had smashed the foundations of a house, and suddenly Deidra had two problems to contend with: the squawking legions of swans that were still ravenously pursuing her, and the weight that prevented her from getting as far away from them as possible. "OOOOUUUUUFFFFFF," went Deidra as Zaniah crushed her ribs and squished her lungs, and have fun imagining what that must have sounded like.

Panicked and disoriented, Deidra had no idea who or what was on top of her-- she just heard more of that infernal squawking, some snarling, and those trumpeting noises growing quieter and quieter. She flailed about underneath Zaniah, twisting and kicking her legs about in a desperate effort to push him off of her, not so much because she was threatened but because she was blinded by adrenaline and the need to free herself, and-- in the midst of her thrashing, with one bone-shattering blow, one paw smashed squarely between Zaniah's hind legs.

(Think of a boot pressing down on an anthill.)

In Deidra's defense, she wasn't aiming, nor was she really looking to hurt Zaniah. She had felt Zaniah's weight on her and panicked! She had lashed out without thinking, and just happened to make contact with his, uh, funny zone. And that just happened to make Deidra realize that the swans were gone, and she had kicked her savior in the nuts.

Zaniah never really thought about how others show their gratitude - he certainly never asked for it, as it wasn't something that someone of his stature should do. It was also unbecoming for someone of his stature to scream in a lady's face.

Unfortunately, that was what he did when Deidra kicked him; his deep voice twisting unnaturally into a higher pitched wail.

"AAAAAAH! OH! MY! GOD!! I'M SO SORRY!"

He had already collapsed away from her, laying on his side with his back arched. "AAAAAAAHH??" In his mind, he was trying to piece together the puzzle pieces that had led to this situation (WHY WOULD SHE KICK HIM THERE?) - anything to take his mind off of the sharp pain that had literally taken the Prince off his feet.

Nardir's secret weapon: Deidra the ball smasher.

Wait, no, Zaniah, this isnt Princely. You have to be strong for your people.

Whether Deidra was hovering over him or not, he would suddenly rise to his feet, taking in a deep breath and closing his eyes. "I'm okay." He stated, more to reassure himself than anything else (but he couldn't hide that little shake in his voice). He wasn't socially adept, so the only way to move on from this 'accident' was to pretend it never happened at all.

"You are safe now, ma'am." Nope, still had that slightly shaky voice. "I'm glad I got here in time." Silence. Dead silence. He actually had no idea how to continue this conversation. And so he blinked down at her, trying to think of a conversation starter. That thought process was unsuccessful.

He had done his duty as a Prince, he had protected this damsel in distress. Mother and Father would be proud. And now that she was safe, he was no longer needed.