Tag Archives: bathroom

Me:(walking into the bathroom where I see both Gary and the Iko looking into the toilet) WAIT, I need to get a camera.

What, you thought I was going to stick my hand in the toilet to get that bone? Yeh, right! Yes, that is what that was, a bone. I have had people guess it was a sock and a condom. Seriously? A condom in my house? With my sans uterus, way past childbearing old arse?

Gary:She needs to get that out of the toilet. Go ahead Iko, you dropped it in there, now you get it out.

Iko: Gives the universal Lab look of ‘are you f’in kidding me’, turns around and walks out of the bathroom.

Me: Guess that leaves you, my sweet. Don’t worry, I just cleaned that toilet… um, when was that again.

He is hard pressed to believe I did not put the dog up to this… perhaps that will make him think next time he leaves the seat up ; )

An early morning walker and lover of garbage day, I take notice of what people throw away. It seems toilets are all the rage in the ‘hood.

First I came across this one at the curb, which BTW has been there since January 10th. It has that lovely retro Harvest Gold look to it. They tried to cleverly camouflage it as regular garbage by stuffing some boxes in it and leaving it at the curb.

The garbage men are not buying it.

This second one is sort of leaning causally at the back of the house just chillin’ with the old screens and stuff. You know, sort of making a permanent home for itself as a lawn ornament of sorts. No, I do not walk into people’s backyards to take pictures. What? You think I am a stalker or something? This yard butts up against an open area on my walk. I love that Regency Blue styling.

How do I know so much about vintage toilet colors? You know, it’s sort of a hobby. No seriously, I found them here which led me to here.

Like this:

Another great shot from my friend Sue. The same one who brought you Social Media Explained from a bathroom stall. I am convinced she hangs in the most interesting buildings in NY. Hey Sue, were these in the same building?

So, let’s think about this sign. What are the dangers of rapping in the elevator?

1. Perhaps you would make someone angry enough to cause a fight.

2. You could become so engrossed in the act of rapping that you would press all the wrong buttons causing the elevator to malfunction. (unlikely)

3. Or maybe the building hipsters just thought this was funny.

Now even a mundane elevator ride or a visit to the bathroom can be amusing. Nothing bad about that.

Like this:

We came home the other night from a weekend away to find this sign on the bathroom. It was obvious that Jana had some friends over while we were away.

What I love about my kids’ friends is not only do they totally get my sense of humor, they spontaneously leave me notes in the oddest places. Thank you, Kate, for reminding us what we need to do and where to do it.

Like this:

At pivotal times in the lives of our offspring we feel compelled to impart some wisdom. We can’t help ourselves. As parents we are convinced that no matter how competent our children have become, they still need that last bit of advice from us as they jet off to exciting new destinations.

Tonight Jana left for semester abroad in Sevilla Spain. We were driving back from lunch when I told her that I wanted to give her some words of wisdom. All I could think of was:

¿dónde está el baño? , which I thought meant ‘where is the bathroom’ but in fact it means ‘where is the bath’. Great! So now not only am I being a total pain in the ass, I am giving her the wrong information. I also told her to ask ¿tienes mantequilla? , which may or may not mean ‘do you have butter’ in case they gave her dry toast. This was only because mantequilla rhymes with Sevilla and I thought that was entertaining.

As you can imagine there was quite a bit of eye rolling in the car.

So that’s it for now on the semester abroad updates (since some dentist that will go nameless seems to think I am acting like too much of a mom blogger and would like more MFTA stuff).

Over the next few days you will hear all the reasons why I love the W Hotel in Miami. This first reason is a biggie. How can I, the Magnet for the Absurd, ever resist a coaster in the bathroom under glass that asks me:

This was sent to me by Riki (of the lost ring in the car fame). It brought up all sorts of questions for us. Like, do they really think that after taking a leak on a promo message you are more inclined to buy that product? “Honey, I just peed on an ad for Kentucky Fried Chicken, let’s go get some”.

Now think about this one. Who does the installation of these? Or better yet, who changes them!

For those who are in the healthcare field, note the joke in the photo. For those who are not, Flomax is a medication for male urinary symptoms.

What really boggles my mind, is who thought of this and then better yet, was able to sell it in to a boss or investor? “Ok, so I have this great idea to brand urinal screens. That’s right, we are going out to sell the idea to brand managers that having people piss on their logo is a great way to get them to buy their products. What? No of course that does not have a negative connotation. This is brand loyalty at it’s finest. Get the consumer when he is most vulnerable, with this pecker in his hand. This is a gold mine I tell you!”

Now that is one great salesperson!

I particularly like the splash graphic. I certainly don’t want that illustrator using MY bathroom.

And finally, let’s look at the suggested markets.

Trade shows – as if you don’t see enough crap there, oh right this is about pee, not crap. Maybe we need to think about toilet liners.

Radio stations – um…why? don’t get this.

Pharmaceuticals – viagra, anyone?

PSA’s (public service announcement for those not in the biz) – “urine, the anti-drug?” or maybe this is a good place to warn about drug testing. or is it just that PSA sounds like… never mind that was a cheap shot.

Beverage/Spirits – this one is obvious. you drink, you pee.

Pranks – ummmmm…duh!

Sports Rivalries – piss on your rivals!

I believe it is safe to say this is THE most ridiculous ad specialty I have seen yet (and I have seen many). But hey, what do I know? I thought botox cosmetics was a bad idea.