I certainly can relate to where your at emotionally. Once of the side effects of being molested is to feel what your feeling. I like the analogy of getting sprayed by the passing bus. The good thing is that as you feel what you feel and recognize where the shit is coming from, you can wash it off so that is on you no longer.

Your in a process, a multi-staged process and you are working your way through it. You have come along ways to be where you are. The good thing to recognize is that feeling dirty says you still have a ways to go. There is a big gap between where you are and where you want to be.

Knowing that there still is a ways to go will give you the motivation to keep going. Once you work your way thru days like today, you get the payoff of knowing your clean, as clean and worthy as anyone else.

That is the process, the promise and the reality of keeping at it. You will make it. You know what you don't want and now you know even more clearly what you do want. That is a good thing.

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