Posted
by
samzenpus
on Tuesday May 11, 2010 @11:01AM
from the lesser-of-two-disasters dept.

An anonymous reader writes "The oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico could be stopped with an underground nuclear blast, a Russian newspaper reports. Komsomoloskaya Pravda, the best-selling Russian daily, reports that in Soviet times such leaks were plugged with controlled nuclear blasts underground. The idea is simple, KP writes: 'The underground explosion moves the rock, presses on it, and, in essence, squeezes the well's channel.' It's so simple, in fact, that the Soviet Union used this method five times to deal with petrocalamities, and it only didn't work once."

Back in the late eighties, when the world was turned upside down by the fall of the iron curtain. my friends and I speculated that the fact that Reagan had survived assassination* had torn a hole in reality, thrusting us into a Bizarro Universe.

Now we have Russians suggesting something that only would make sense in a really bad TV movie or potboiler eco-disaster novel.

Like the man uptopic says, what could possibly go wrong?

We're there, man.

Stefan

* Schoolyard mythology: presidents elected in years ending in 0 always died in office.

Well, I guess Hitler thought that he had classic blunder #1 canceled out by #2. If I remember right, he thought that he had essentially gotten the Russians to go against a Sicilian (not directly, but they were allies) when death was on the line... Too bad Benito was northern Italian...

Now this is the way to go fishing in the south.
Just line up the fish trawlers on one side of the Gulf and start scooping them off of the surface.
Fishing industry gets a bonanza and we seal a leak.
Oh, heck. Just drop a 48 tons of Creole seasoning in before the blast with a few hundred tons of corn and potatoes and we're done. We can just skip all the fisheries and just wait for dinner to come ashore.

But, I'll have to remember this next time we go fishing.
"No, sir mister warden. We weren't fishing with dynamite, we were just trying to plug an oil leak in the bottom of the pond"

That's nothing. If Looney Tunes has taught me anything, plugging the pipe up with golf balls/shredded tires will cause the pipe to bulge... then the entire ground will bulge... then the entire area with explode covering everything with oil for miles around.

Actually, the single entity responsible for the outcome of the war was Archimedes. He used his death ray to take out large numbers of German ships in the harbor at Syracuse, thus singlehandedly reducing the size of the Roman navy below what was necessary to sustain an attack! @ ^*\/.NO CARRIER

You can still buy explosives for agricultural, artistic and even personal uses in most states. I dated someone who used explosives to form sculptures out of scraps of rusty metal and she had a permit and used all of her explosives inside.