Howie made his grand return to the airwaves on Friday. From now on, the live ping will be done week to week. Those on the ping list will be pinged for (most) columns, as well as Monday through Friday for his shows, though perhaps not on holidays and/or times when he'll be off (this week for example, he won't be on Thanksgiving or the following day)

Carr on drivers
From Kerik to Menino, political wheelmen often roll to the top
By Howie Carr | Sunday, November 18, 2007 | http://www.bostonherald.com | Columnists

Who will drive the candidates car?

This is a very big question for the average politician. Because if you come up with the wrong person, it can lead to trouble, far down the road.

Just ask Rudy Giuliani. He did what most pols do - he picked a cop, a fast-talking street guy by the name of Bernie Kerik. Hows that working out for you, Rudy?

First Bernie gets indicted, now his ex-girlfriend, Judith Regan, is suing Rupert Murdochs News Corp. [NWS] This lunachick, as Regan is now called, claims she was fired as a book publisher because Rudys driver had given her enough dirt to hurt Ruperts guy Rudy. I guess you could call it pillow talk.

But then, in Boston we have our own examples of politicians hiring the wrong drivers. Most make the same decision Rudy did - a cop. Usually an aspiring pol has two types of drivers to choose from: a cop or a true believer, usually an ambitious, unemployed young man who dreams of someday becoming the person hes driving, and in the meantime wants to share his insights with the candidate in the back seat.

From which category would you pick - semistalker or cop?

Always get a cop, one now-retired statewide officeholder used to say. Theyre used to doing nothing and getting paid for it.

The late Sonny McDonough, once a governors councilor, had a different take on it. He didnt trust cops, not as drivers, and certainly not in the role into which drivers sometimes evolve: bagmen.

The corollary of which was, I always hate it when a cop hands me $300 from somebody, because I never know if he stole $200 or $700.

But look on the bright side of having a cop driver. You never come out of a meeting and discover that the car is gone. Again, the paramilitary background. You neednt worry about inane chatter. On the job, cops seldom speak unless spoken to.

Most important, with a cop you dont have to worry about traffic problems. Parking in front of a fire plug? So what. Ditto speeding tickets or driving in the breakdown lane. You dont get pulled, period. Its professional courtesy.

So the pol wins the election, and your cop driver quite naturally expects to be rewarded. Alas, sometimes things dont work out. Paul Cellucci got state trooper/driver Tony Dichio the U.S. marshals job. Tony left after his work habits made the front page. Bill Welds driver, a state cop named Joe Lawless, became director of security at Massport. Nobody cared, until Sept. 11.

Mayor Ray Flynn needed a driver more than most - and Boston cop John Swerve Swirbalus was his trusted aide. Alas, Swerve was convicted in 1995 of attempting to obstruct justice to quash a road-rage incident. Poor Swerve, hes not a bad guy.

Not every pol goes for a cop, though. The problem is, the civilian driver needs that hack job much more desperately than a cop does. Chub Peabody, when he was running for governor, had a young wheelman named Dapper ONeil. Chub won and the Dap was his patronage secretary for about two days. Then Dapper got shipped out to the Boston Licensing Board, where he was soon defending Combat Zone dives.

Then there was Jailbird Joe Timilty, thrice-unsuccessful candidate for mayor of Boston. I wonder how he feels about his old driver, Mumbles Menino, who went to the Parkman House while his mentor was packed off to Club Fed.

Around here, the biggest payoffs to drivers have come from the Bush family. In 1980, George H.W. Bush used Massachusetts state reps during the New Hampshire primary. Andy Card became a cabinet secretary for 41 and then 43s White House chief of staff. Ex-rep Andrew Natsios has had a string of good federal jobs at good wages. Another of 41s drivers, Mass state cop James Roche, became marshal for Boston, then top marshal for the United States, and now a court clerk.

The pols come and they go. Cellucci liked to ride in the front seat, Mitt had a convoy (the Mob would call them crash cars). As for Deval, unlike Mitt, he doesnt like anyone with him in the back seat. He travels solo, staring out the Caddys tinted windows. But they all need drivers, and the drivers all want a quo for the quid.

Theres one way around the problem, of course. You could do what Mike Dukakis did - take the Green Line. I dont see another another Dukakis on the horizon, do you?

Today’s Pols and Politics feature in the Boston Herald mentions Herald scribe Tony Massarotti’s appearance
on Finneran’s Forum, in which Tony says he has no respect for “courtroom liars” like
Barry Bonds. There was an embarassing silence.

“Discussing Barry Bonds federal perjury rap on his radio show Friday, ex-House Speaker Tom Finneran opened up somewhat of a Pandoras box when he asked Herald baseball guru Tony Massarotti for his feelings on the case.

“Massarotti proceeded to rail against Bonds for allegedly lying under oath, saying he had no respect for courtroom liars.

“Finneran, who pleaded guilty to federal obstruction of justice charges for misleading a grand jury, was painfully silent. You could almost hear the flummoxed felon squirming in his chair. After Massarottis colorful analysis ended, Finneran abruptly thanked him for coming on the show and went to a commercial.”

1st Hour TV maven and conservative babe Ann Coulter joins us to talk about her new book If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans.

2nd Hour Bruce Freidrich from PETA will join us for our annual "Why eating turkeys is bad" hour....want to go vegetarian? (You can also call 1-888-VEG FOOD (note, it is not 1-800)).

3rd Hour CHUMP LINE! Call 617-779-3469 and leave Howie, Sandy or Happy a message about today\'s stories or anything else buzzing around your bonnet and we may play it back on the air! Max Robins our TV Guru will be with us to answer all of those nagging questions about your favorite show on the boob tube...

I remember Howie's story about intercepting a cellphone or radio call trying to decide if Dukakis should arrive by car or on foot to some event in Boston. The aides decided to drop the gov off a block or two away so he could appear to have walked from his office.

I generally hated the Green Line, but only because they scheduled it to arrive at BU five minutes before evening classes got out, and making connections to the Orange Line was pain, since that was the time those cars went out of service, and rather than wait for another train, I'd hoof the tunnel to the Orange line, usually missing that train by 5-15 seconds. I think it was about 20 minutes to the next one.

I generally hated the Green Line, but only because they scheduled it to arrive at BU five minutes before evening classes got out

Off topic, but I was in grad school at BU when Dukakis was in and everyone (well, the Globe) was praising his humble simplicity in taking the Green Line. I'd stand in Copley Station 20 minutes waiting for a Commonwealth Ave car I could get on, and just count the nearly empty Riverside (Dukakis' line) cars streaming by.

I do recall reading a story about Dukakis and the T: He apparently had some "important" out of state guests and wanted to show off the T by taking them on it when they went to lunch -- only no one told the T. So the trains were running on their usual non-rush hour schedule, and they had to wait something like half an hour. I gather Dukakis was livid at being embarrassed like that! I always thought during those years that I wouldn't mind taking the T either -- if they'd only run it according to my schedule!

Northeastern cars go Huntington Ave (they're the only ones that don't go through Kenmore). Boston College/Commonwealth cars go Comm Ave. Beacon Street cars go, well, Beacon street -- they come out of the tunnel after Kenmore at Beacon and St. Mary's Street. Riverside cars don't actually go on a street -- I think their first stop after the tunnel (and after Kenmore) is Fenway, near Emanuel and Simmons colleges. Most of the route is actually kind of woodsy.

Howie’s famous story about the Duke—when 2 union leaders
came over to visit and he offered them a beer. And they
think, hey, this is...not a bad guy. The Duke emerges
with a bottle of beer...and two glasses. hey big spender!

I forgot that the Kennedys and McCarthy were friends. WFB has a story about the guy that JFK was running against for the US Senate. An aide calls up McCarthy, and asks him to come to Boston to campaign, and McCarthy says "Sure. Just have [the blue blood candidate] give me a call, and we'll set something up".

WFB said that McCarthy knew JFK's opponent was too rigid to personally call, so he deftly side-stepped not supporting the pubbie candidate over JFK.

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