Monday, January 01, 2018

Before I get into the best things to look forward to in the next twelve months, let me highlight a few things not on my list. First off, there is the World Cup which will not be featuring the United States of America on account they failed to qualify this year. Then there is Marvel’s New Warriors that was supposed to debut on Freeform this year except they passed on the show. We may still get to see the show this year as Marvel is still shopping it around. Um, now that Disney who own Marvel and pretty much owns Hulu, after purchasing Fox’s shares, totaling sixty percent, seems like a good spot to me. They already have Marvel’s Runaway. Really, I just want to see the AT&T Girl and Squirrel Girl sooner than later.

Another possible event this year I have zero interest in is the potential reboot of the XFL. Recently Vince McMahon sold off a bunch of WWE stock and is reportedly going to use that money to get his failed football league up and running again. Hard pass. I, like much of America, watched the first game, laughed, and stopped after that. Why someone would think it could work a decade and a half later has to be senile. Sure some people have lost interest in the NFL, and I am one of them but my disinterest is in not wanting to watch people get brain damage anymore, a presumably more violent XFL is not going to help that.

10. Wako (January 22 on the Paramount Channel) – Poor Tim Riggins, he was pegged to be the breakout star from Friday Night Lights but followed the show up with being the lead in two historic bombs (and that does not include X-Men Origins: Wolverine where he was not asked back to be Gambit in future films). This will be his first major lead role since. Notorious Nineties nostalgia was big last year with OJ, the Menendez Brothers and Tonya Harding getting stories on the big and small screens, and now Riggins is playing cult leader David Koresh. Then there is also Michael Shannon as one of the Feds and Melissa Benoist as one of the cultist (yes Zod and Supergirl on the same show). Now I am sure your first question is, what the fork is the Paramount Channel? Now it is not a new streaming service, it is not really even a new cable channel, it was Spike, and before that Spike TV, and before that The New TNN, and before that The National Network, and before that The Nashville Network, which I believe was the last time I watched the cannel back when it aired Dukes of Hazard reruns.

9. Game Night (February 23) – Really any cast that boasts Rachel McAdams, George Bluth, and a Friday Night Lights reunion of Coach Taylor and Landry Clarke is must see in my book. But the trailer makes the movie look forking hilarious. From the trailer, it looks like an action comedy where a group of couples are brought together to solve a murder mystery, except the host gets captured for real (maybe), but everyone still thinks it is part of the game. Awesome.

8. Ruins - First Aid Kit (January 19) – Folk rock may be my favorite genre of the decade and First Aid Kit has had a few songs that have made my year end lists, but It’s a Shame released last year is by far my favorite from the band so far. Hopefully the album lives up to the single.

7. Titans (TBD) – Okay, we need a new streaming service like we need a hole in the head, but it seems like every content maker is going to have their own standalone service rather than selling it elsewhere. It started last year with CBS All Access. Next DC is starting their own. And Disney has one slated for 2018. But the DC streaming service will at least get me to do a free trial just to check out Titans whom are apparently not going to be teenagers (at least not most of them). But most importantly, Lyla Garrity was cast in a supporting role with potential for her own spin off. No word on when this will air or when the DC streaming service even starts, but the only other show announced, a Young Justice reboot, does have a vague release date of "Fall 2018".

6. Golden Hour - Kacey Musgraves (TBD) / Untitled Vampire Weekend Album – Kacey Musgraves released one of my favorite debut albums of the decade and my favorite country album in over a decade. There was a sophomore slump for the follow up but I am still looking forward to it. In other Musgraves news, lead singer Ezra Koenig said the next Vampire Weekend album is inspired by the country singer which made me that much more interested in a new album by the alt-rock band.

5. Women’s Royal Rumble (January 28) – I watched wrestling as a kid and then again in college, but again fell off slightly after that. Do not ask me why, but I started listening to the Grantland wrestling podcast, probably because I listened to them all. And when David Shoemaker bolted with Bill Simmons to the Ringer, I ended listening to two wrestling podcast. I did start tangentially following sports entertainment because of it. Then last year Alexa Bliss and I became instantly interested in the Women’s Division as she quickly became the second best bad guy ever (after the late great Rowdy Roddy Piper).

Growing up, women were just arm candy for the men. They started wrestling again in the nineties, but it was not much better as they just hired fitness models and actual models; Trish Status actually was the head of a team called T and A. WWE tried to legitimate them with the Women’s Revaluation, even retiring the Diva’s Title in 2015, but it was just the same three factions of three wrestling the same matches over and over again. But with the brand split, the two main shows need more bodies and Bliss was one of the call up.

After Survivor Series, the WWE called up five more women (along with the returning Paige) and now we are getting an all-female Royal Rumble, which was always my favorite match since WWE started it back in 1988. It is vague on the rules. The men’s is a thirty men over the top rope competition where a new competitor comes down to the ring ever two(ish) minutes with the winner getting a title match at Wrestlemania. The title match is the only stipulation. Currently right now, there are only eleven women on both Raw and Smackdown (but that is including Lana who has not wrestled in months and Nikki Bella who has not been seen since Wrestlemania). And wo of them are currently champions who are typically in the Royal Rumble. But there are ten women currently in NXT which brings you to 29 non champions’ women employed by the WWE. Of course the Royal Rumble is known for its surprise returns, you have to imagine, there are plenty of retired wrestlers who would like to be in a Rumble, and a few shocking debuts (Ronda Rosey has been teasing her involvement in the WWE for years). I may actually have to take the WWE up on their free trial to watch history.

4. More Marvel Movies (Various dates) – We are getting our fair share of Marvel movies this year but what makes things more interesting is Disney recently announced they are buying 20th Century Fox movie studios which means Disney now owns all things Marvel including X-Men and Fantastic Four (well Sony still technically owns the rights to Spider-Man but he has shown up in a couple Marvel movies after the last film reboot failed). Could those universes collide this year? Doubtful they will be included in the already bloated Infinity War, but maybe they add something to the end credit scene to tease their inclusion in Phase Four (which comes after the next Avengers movie next year). Here is the rundown of all eight (!) movies based on Marvel properties: Black Panther (February, 16), The New Mutants (April 13), Avengers: Infinity War (May 4), Deadpool 2 (July 1), Ant-Man and the Wasp (July 6), Venom (October 5), X-Men: Dark Phoenix (November 2), Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (December 14; note this is an animated movie that does not seemed to be tied to any live action universe). Oh yeah, they also have new television show Cloak and Dagger coming to Freeform sometime this year too while Runaways has its season finale next week and, again, there is a chance New Warriors finds a home this year.

3. Rise (March 12 on NBC) – They had me at from the producer of Friday Night Lights and Parenthood, but throw in a producer of Hamilton, a live action Moana, and, welcome back Marley Shelton. It seemed like she was the next big thing at the turn of the century but other than Sin City, it is hard to think of anything she has done since Sugar and Spice. I think there was a one and done Lifetime show.

2. The XXIII Olympic Winter Games (February 9) – It is the end of an era as for the first time since 1988, an Olympic Games will not be hosted in prime time by Bob Costas (unless you count when he came down with pink eye at the last winter event). Instead Mike Tirico will oversee the proceedings after being ESPN’s/ABC’s lead host. Ironically also absent these games will be the last Winter host Russia who was ban after state sponsored doping scandal (Russians not tested positive can participate under an independent flag). Also not taking the trip to South Korea will be NHL players who will not participate for the first time since 1998. But hey, it will be the only time in four years we get to watch curling on television and Costas may be gone but I am sure Mary Carillo, who only seems to pop up during Olympics, will have a special interest story or two.

1. Black Manta (in Aquaman, December 21) – I audibly laughed when I heard DC was making a live action Aquaman movie. Aquaman is lame and always has been (with the lone exception of the over the top version from Batman: The Brave and the Bold). The green and orange color palette is hard to look at. But then I got actually kind of excited because that meant we might get a Black Manta, my personal favorite supervillain, sighting. As some who grew up with a heavy dose of the Super Friends, I gravitated to the villain in the Legion of Doom who would beat the crap out of Aquaman. The problem is that Ocean Master was first announced as the film’s antagonist. But it was later announced Black Manta would also be in the film.

Of course Black Manta could play a bigger role moving forward… if there is a DC movie universe. Aquaman could be a make or break point. All the movies sans Wonder Woman have been received as mediocre at best while Justice League bombed at the box office. Then nothing after Aquaman has even started filming (yes, there are eight Marvel movies this year but only one DC movie) even though thirteen other films have been formally announced, If Aquaman under performs, that could be the end of the DC Movie Universe (for now at least). But if they do move forward, my sources tell me that Justice League teased the Legion of Doom while a Flashpoint movie is also on the DC docket and Black Manta is featured in the comic version of that. Plus Flashpoint could serve as a hard reboot to get rid of everything that has not worked (Batfleck, sullen Superman, Leto's Joker). But again, if Aquaman fails, we may just get Wonder Woman throughout history films for the next decade until DC can figure things out.

Since tonight marks the return of television (seriously, too soon networks, can we have more than a week and a half break?), here is what I will be watching while trying to avoid going outside in the cold. Seriously, I saw a few negative lows this week.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

The first domestic trailer did very good job to get excited for the sequel; the group doing the Cups song from the original, Anna Kendrick making fart noises. The Super Bowl spot gave up an a capella version of Before He Cheats and the Green Bay Packers covering Bootylicious. The latest trailer brings the funny (...because of World War II... boom). We got some new musical performances: Wrecking Ball.. yawn. But the Germans pick things up with an eerie snippet of Muse and a funny take on Bell Biv DeVoe. Then something that is giving me pause about the second movie happened: Rebel Wilson giving her take on the A Tribe Called Quest / Leaders of the New School classic collaboration. Hopefully that turns out better than the trailer would have me believe. I would be much more confident if Anna Kendrick had taken lead on that one after she crushed No Diggity in the first film. Maybe they are saving her for the epic Busta Rhymes part which is so great you have to spend money to see it, they just will not give away something that good during a free trailer.

Aloha - May 29

News broke last year that Cameron Crowe was filming a new movie in Hawaii with Emma Stone, Bill Murray, Rachel McAdams, and Danny McBride. Just the casting and with Crowe writing and directing I was almost ready to call it the greatest movie in the history of cinema. I probably would have if they cast Ryan Gosling instead of Bradly Cooper. Last week we finally a title (Aloha) and a trailer. It was not as great as I was hoping (though I cannot confirm nor deny I have already watched it over twenty-five) most it falling on me being disappointed that it stars Cooper instead of Gosling and Stone as an Air Force liaison (with that said if she were cast in a female reboot of Top Gun, I would start camping out at my local multiplex tomorrow). But of course there are some good times in the trailer: "You're gonna wear this like Flavor Flav wears a clock," the dude from The Office saying "a lot," the best Cold War Kids song in their catalogue, the scene with Emma covering her face with her hands (if I was a fourteen year old girl with a Tumblr I would gif the crap out of that, granted if I were a fourteen year old girl, I would probably be giffing Cooper rolling his eyes at Emma playing guitar instead; wait Emma Stone plays guitar in this movie? Why is this not out yet?); and most importantly the triumphant return of Rachael McAdams who has not been in a watchable movie since maybe Morning Glory five years ago.

Trainwreck - July 17

After popularizing the beta male bro comedy genre ten years ago, Judd Apatow seems to be trying to get the female version of the genre off the ground. He produced Bridesmaid and now the first film he has ever directed but not write looks to continue that beta female route with Trainwreck. The movie was instead written by star Amy Schumer. I am a little iffy about the trailer because I am one of the few Clevelanders still hates LeBron James. But hey, there is Brie Larson (if Amy is Seth Rogan, does that make Briw Paul Rudd?) And it seems clear LeBron is playing himself, does that mean John Cena does too? Either way I do not think I could lookm at him the same way ever again.

Hot Pursuit - May 8

When I heard Reese Witherspoon and Sofia Vergarra were in a trailer together for a female buddy comedy I though it was a fake one for Funny or Die. After seeing it and learning it is a real movie, I am still suspicious that it may really end up being fake. Maybe Reese was right to stop making comedies and should have continued to take serious roles.