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It’s almost time for the 2013 WitOut Awards for Philadelphia Comedy! As we get closer to the show, we’ll be rolling out a series of posts to help you get more acquainted with this year’s nominees. Read all about ’em, and then be sure to get your tickets for the big event on January 13th at World Cafe Live!

It’s almost time for the 2013 WitOut Awards for Philadelphia Comedy! As we get closer to the show, we’ll be rolling out a series of posts to help you get more acquainted with this year’s nominees. Read all about ’em, and then be sure to get your tickets for the big event on January 13th at World Cafe Live!

Doogie Horner on James Hesky:“James Grammond is hilarious. I can’t think of a funnier James in Philadelphia! Just kidding.

One time James Hesky and I went to the driving range. Fifty percent of my drives sliced right so hard that they landed in the creek next to the range, but James didn’t laugh at me once, not even later that night when I was on stage telling jokes.”

Aaron Hertzog on Chip Chantry:
“When I started doing stand-up in Philly a little over six years ago Chip Chantry was one of the comedians I most wanted to impress. When I heard him laugh at my jokes from the back of the room at an open mic, or he said something nice to me about one of my jokes it really meant a lot because I looked up to him so much. Years later my respect and admiration for Chip have only grown as I’ve learned more about what goes into doing comedy. Chip is constantly writing and creating new, great material. His work ethic is something every comic should try to emulate. He’s been one of the top comics in Philly for years, and plays clubs and venues all over the country and is not content to rest on his laurels. Chip can also play any type of room. He’s got material that will kill in a room full of young, city hipsters and he can wow a crowd of older suburban ‘normal people’. No matter what type of show you are putting on, you can be safe booking Chip and know he will do a fantastic job. He can write topical jokes, material about his personal life, crazy off-the-wall stuff, tell a fantastic story, and can write the heck out of a sketch. Any time I need help with a writing project I know I can count on Chip, because not only is he a great comedian and writer, he’s also a great friend.”

Darryl Charles on Doogie Horner:“Doogie is awesome, and funny. He can effortlessly switch from short one-liners to long and interweaving stories while keeping his trademark wit and mannerisms intact. That’s good, and hard to do. I like him a bunch, and I’m a fan of his writing too. If anyone was going to win this but me, I’d want it to be Doogie. Sadly, it won’t be. But I’m happy he was nominated.”

Chip Chantry on Darryl Charles:
“Most comedians are like vodka—they’ll get you drunk, sometimes they’re hard to swallow, and you can see right through them. But you pretty much know what you’re getting.

Darryl Charles, on the other hand, is like Pinnacle Vodka—there are many different varieties of Darryl. It’s no secret that Darryl is perhaps the most versatile performer in Philadelphia. Because from night to night (and many times set to set) Darryl plays a variety of hilarious roles in the Philadelphia comedy scene. Whether he’s doing stand-up, performing improv with ComedySportz or Hatespeech Committee, doing the Cheapodcast and The Monthly Hour with James Hesky, or making videos with those jerks at Bird Text, the only consistent thing about Darryl Charles is that he’s always funny.

And he’s also sweet.

And he loves Butterscotch Vodka.”

James Hesky on Aaron Hertzog:
“Aaron Hertzog used to be quite overweight, then he lost 200 pounds. But you know what he didn’t lose? His sense of humor. And also whatever sadness is buried deep within his soul that makes him have to perform stand-up comedy. That’s definitely still there.

Aside from stand-up, Aaron is also part of Hey Rube, Hate Speech Committee and the Holding Court Podcast. Or at least he was until he left Philadelphia to live in L.A. so he could pursue his dream of never having to be more than 40 feet away from Luke Giordano.”

As the year winds down, WitOut collects lists from comedy performers and fans of their favorite moments, comedians, groups, shows, etc. from the last year in Philly comedy. Top 5 of 2012 lists will run throughout December–if you’d like to write one, pitch us your list at contact@witout.net!

The Musical Brilliance of Doogie Horner – Anyone who has seen Doogie Horner perform stand-up before has probably seen him emulating R&B backup singers or singing depressing Irish folk music. In 2012, I had the pleasure of seeing Doogie both freestyle rap and jam out with a celebrity. In January at the Raven Lounge, on an evening where there was a sketch group dressed like Rabbis (or Rabbanim if you will) who rapped about being Jewish for 10 minutes and got zero laughs, Doogie had finished his set and as host Tom Cassidy walked up, Doogie decided to freestyle rap about Tom Cassidy’s zipper on his sweatshirt. You’d think this would be just as strange as Rabbis rapping about being Jewish, but Doogie had the entire room laughing. Nine months later, after doing a week with Doogie at Helium, Craig Robinson (The Office, Hot Tub Time Machine) who was in the area doing a gig set up his keyboard in the bar area after the club closed and jammed out. While singing “Papa was a Rolling Stone” Doogie stepped in and sang some impromptu lyrics, and had Craig, his band, and the entire room laughing their asses off.

Keith Purnell and the Nudists – By far one of the weirdest gigs I did all year was emceeing a show at a Nudist camp. There were about 80 nudists, who were all senior citizens, sitting on folding chairs facing the stage (spread-eagle I might add). I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t weird, and it visibly threw me off my game a little bit. Keith Purnell was the headliner, and he handled it like a pro. It was an outdoor gig but the stage was covered by a tarp, and it started to rain VERY hard. The nudists didn’t flinch, because they didn’t have any clothes on they were worried about getting wet. Keith performed for an hour including doing an ENCORE set, which included completely nude soaking wet men joining him on stage every five to ten minutes to try and get rain water out of the tarp covering the stage. At one point one of these men started to pretend to hump Keith from behind in an attempt to get a laugh, to which Keith responded “Do I look like a heroin addict? Then get that needle dick off stage.”

Becca Trabin on the Risk Podcast “Live from Philly” – I have only seen Becca perform stand-up twice and they were both at open mics at Helium. The first was over a year ago, and the second was last month, where she had noticeably improved and has obviously become a hell of a performer. However I received a recommendation from someone to check out the “Live from Philly” episode of the Risk podcast, which is not a comedy podcast but a podcast where people tell true stories, and Becca was featured. I won’t ruin it for anyone who hasn’t listened to it, but even listening to it in podcast form and not seeing it live, it is one of the most impressive performances of any kind I’ve ever heard. As someone who considers them self to be a pretty emotionless robot, it knocked me square on my ass. You’re doing yourself a disservice by not checking it out.

Kevin Ryan gives a math lecture in Delco – If you haven’t gotten a gig in Delco where you try and tell jokes to drunken Delconians in the type of bar where the average number of teeth per mouth is seven, well you’re missing out on a unique comedy experience. Some of those shows end up being fantastic, however an equal number of those shows end up being a nightmare. One particular nightmare featured an early act from a cross-dressing 250 pound hairy man doing slam poetry about being a lesbian and how much he/she enjoyed oral sex with women. If anyone is wondering what the absolute best way to turn off a comedy show audience would be…it’s that. Kevin Ryan however completely flipped the audience back into comedy mode and took a bullet for every comedian that went up after him. After five minutes of stage time where the bar was simply not listening, Kevin started berating the audience for not listening and threatened to spend the rest of his time on stage giving a math lecture since “no one in the audience had obviously finished grade school.” It was hilarious to everyone, including the very people he was insulting, and it was also the night I learned some audiences love abuse.

Greg Lynn in Roxborough – This one is going to sound counterintuitive to everything you may think a comedian SHOULD do on stage, but Greg Lynn walked half of a 12 person audience…and it was the funniest thing I saw all year. I should point out this was a show that was supposed to be headlined by someone who cancelled his appearance, started an hour late, and the half audience that Greg walked didn’t particularly want to be there and frankly I’m not sure why they were. After a few comics bombed, Greg brought energy to the stage that was seriously lacking all show, and had every comedian and the half of the crowd who stayed pissing in their pants. You may think the comedians who went after him were mad half the audience left, but I was one of those comedians, and it completely changed the energy of the show in a positive way. Somehow Greg Lynn walking half the audience with his demented comedy from hell saved the show.

Twice a month, WitOut digs through its virtual piles of old columns to repost something great you may have missed.

This post was contributed by comedian, author and graphic designer Doogie Horner. On April 26th, 2011, Doogie hosted the Helium Comedy Club open mic night, and did sketches of all of the comedians performing on the show.

This Wednesday Tight Six expands from their weekly open mic to present Not Jazz at Chris’ Jazz Cafe (1421 Sansom St.) a show featuring “a mix of stand-up, music (not jazz), fun, not jazz, games, and other spontaneous insanity.” The show will feature comedy from Doogie Horner, Juliet Hope Wayne, Alex Grubard, Jim Ginty, Sidney Gantt, and Robert X.

Comedian and storyteller Juliet Hope Wayne has been nominated for the 2012 Philebrity Award for General Fabulousness. The Philebrity awards are determined by online poll that will be open until Wednesday, December 19 at noon.