Sight Unseen

I put in a new pair of contacts this morning. To those of you lens wearers, you know that contact lenses come in varying lengths of wearability. Some are monthly, some are weekly, some are daily. I’m more of a “wear them until you can no longer identify solid objects” kind of a girl. Since I just throw them in the case without any rinsing, you can imagine how fuzzy things get. Once in a while, I’ll lose a lens, and that will speed up the process of replacing them. Obviously, my optometrist loves me.

When I went to put my contacts in this morning, however, I noticed that the lid to the right lens compartment was open slightly. I looked inside only to find that there was no lens there. Then I checked the left compartment. Empty. My heart started racing. This has happened before, but of course, only after a night of overindulging on wine. After a moment’s reflection, I was sure this didn’t happen, as I had been in bed by 8:30 reading the night before. I looked all over the bathroom counter for signs of runaway contact lenses. There were no remnants. I checked Justin’s case. Could he have mistaken my case for his? Nope.

And then, as a three-year-old screaming blob ran by the bathroom door, I had a sudden revelation. Harrison has been spending an awful lot of time in the bathroom now that he’s potty trained. At least seven times a day, I have to clean up some new experiment in there. (I’ve long since given up constant supervision in the bathroom, because inevitably Ella will need to be in there with us and there’s just not enough space. Also, watching your kid pee gets old after about the 300th time.) So, I decided to investigate:

Me: Harrison, did you open Mommy’s contact lens case?

H: Yes I did.

Me: (out of pure curiosity) Why did you do that?

H: Because I thought it might be a little bit dirty. So I cleaned it.

Me: Honey, you don’t need to do that for Mommy. Where are the contact lenses?

H: <blank stare>

Me: You know, the little things that Mommy puts in her eyes so she can see?

H: I washed them too.

It is unclear to me where exactly those lenses ended up, but I’m assuming they took a trip down the drain. I do, however, think that my eye doctor will be impressed with Harrison’s concern for my eyewear’s cleanliness.