January 10, 2008

Meredith, fashion queen here. OK, not really, but I'd like to say a few more words about that subculture out there wearing those ungodly pants.

Today I was walking behind a group of young people. Please, will someone explain the baggy pants? They're not simply baggy, they really aren't pants at all as they don't even cover the underpants. One of the young men kept his pants from falling around his ankles with an extremely wide-based gait as the waistband was situated at his mid-thigh. It looks stupid, unless you're Bert the chimney sweep doing a dance with animated penguins in the movie Mary Poppins.

The style, apparently, is associated with gang toughness. If they aren't wielding the guns we all assume they carry, it wouldn't be hard to escape their gangster clutches - just pull the pants down to their ankles, push them over, and run away.

Tough guys, take my word for it. Girls like the bad boys and have since the beginning of time. The thing is, you gotta look good. Wrapping yourself up in what looks like old burlap bags isn’t sexy. Walking like a penguin isn't sexy either. Come on boys, show us your real weapon. Girls want to see the whole package.

Here are some eye-catching bad-boy pants:

The Dancer

The Biker

The Cowboy

The Hoodlum

My personal favorite, The Rock Star

Yum, huh? Show us what you’ve got, boys, unless you’re actually out for a jolly holiday with Mary.