Photo Friday – February 10 on 10

A while back, I signed up for a blogging course, and since then I’ve gotten to be good blogging friends with some incredible bloggers from around the world. Each month on the 10th, some of us form a 10 on 10 photography circle. Our circle contracts and expands. We share 10 photos (occasionally more – my bad!) from our life – a day of our life, generally – and one of us link to another. Our visitors have the opportunity to make their way around the circle. Some of you may have made your way here from Cathy at Peregrination Gourmande and if so WELCOME! Others of you will leave me and head on off to visit with Stephanie at Steph’s Joy. I hope you enjoy!

As some of you know, there was no Photo Friday last week. I went out and captured shrimp boats at rest in the Pass Christian Harbor, but I just couldn’t get the editing right. And then these anxiety attacks that have been a routine part of my life as of late hit because I couldn’t make it work.

I don’t know if you have ever suffered with anxiety. The last two months have been my first real experiences with it. In the past, occasionally I’ve been hit with an overwhelming sense of dread – like something terrible was about to happen. Outside of feeling a little worried, my previous experience with anxiety merely unsettled me. It would pass within a few hours, and I would go on with my life.

This has been an entirely different experience for me. This has been…incredibly difficult. It’s kept me awake; it’s made me cry. Anxiety has made it difficult to breathe and at points, made me wonder if I was dying. (I’m not) There were a couple of days when it went on forever – all afternoon and deep into the night, a kind of paralysis in a loop that I couldn’t escape.

I don’t know how to explain what this experience has been like. I have few coping mechanisms to deal with it, and those that I do have didn’t seem to be of much help. Even thinking about it now is difficult. It is ironic that with my students, we are currently wrapping up the Headspace pack on anxiety because many of them suffer from anxiety. Breathing helps. Remembering that it all eventually passes helps in the waxing and waning moments. Getting out and taking photos has helped with a general sense of unease.

The first four photos for this month’s 10 on 10 Photography Circle were taken at sunset for last week’s Photo Friday post. Sunrise two days later provided a gorgeous backdrop for those same shrimp boats. Sunrises and sunsets at this time of the year shine a little more brightly than the Sound than they do on the Back Bay. This month’s 10 on 10 photography circle wasn’t originally intended as a set of companion images, but it worked out nicely.

The light at this time of the year is incredible. We’ve been hazy and foggy, which is our normal pattern for a Gulf Coast winter. The days are short and the light is diffuse, and I think that’s part of my anxiety problem. The lack of sunshine negatively impacts me. Even here on the beach, the days can be gloomy.

I think, though, that the weather actually offers me hope that all of this will soon pass. Dense, opaque confusion blankets us, making us move a little more carefully and a little slower. Each day, the sun breaks through the nebula and reminds us that the light will always shine. The haze never lasts forever.

Last week I took sunset photos and for approximately 15 hours, I forgot that we all move to the same rhythms as the sun. After the slog, I held on to the sunrise, and I rested. Almost 12 hours of sleep felt like the right thing to do. That recharge – and the end of the two graduate courses I’m taking – has made this week fee a lot brighter and lighter. The anxiety hasn’t been consuming. As Andy recommends, I notice it and then move on to the next sensation. With the azaleas, daffodils, and trees beginning to bloom, darkness recedes and ease begins to settle in like the occasional fog.

The winter always knocks me for a loop, but this year it has been particularly bad. I’m redoubling my efforts to look for the light and doing quite a bit more sleeping. I also have a doctor’s appointment. Spring will be here soon, and the greatest part of the triggers for this anxiety will be resolved. Those are the things I’m focusing on in order to manage this new experience.

Now because this is a 10 on 10 photography circle, please make your way to my friend Steph at Steph’s Joy. If you’re here from Peregrination Gourmande, thanks for coming on around the Circle! Leave us some comment love on your trip, please because bloggers love comments. I hope you enjoy!

Photo Friday Link-Up

Welcome to another edition of the Photo Friday link-up! I missed y’all last week. One of the highlights of my week is looking through your wonderful images and catching a glimpse into your world.

For our last link-up (two weeks ago), the most-viewed link came from Kathy at You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out. As always, she shared an amazing photo.

Photo Friday – Most-Viewed – You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out – The Alley

Our final link came from the lovely Pret-a-Vivre who took us to Giverny. If you missed it, go check it out!

I can’t wait to see what you have for us this week! Make sure to stop by and check out at least two of the other participants.

So sorry to hear about your anxiety but I’m confident you’re going to show it who’s boss. As usual, your photos are fabulous, I love how you capture the changing light. Be kind to yourself, ‘kay?! And one last thing, if winter is hard, just remember winter always turns to spring (literally and metaphorically,) it’s the law of the universe!

Thanks Sammie! It’s been a bit better this month but still there are moments. It’s frustrating to not be able to just turn it off when it comes. But the temperatures are rising and the wisteria is beginning to bloom along with the roses. We’ve had temperatures break into the 80s (upper 20s for you 😉 ) so soon we’ll be lounging on the beach after spending our mornings doing yard work. Every day is a new day and it’s always OK in the end…if it’s not OK, then it’s not the end 😉

Jen you are the one from our group who gets those skies!!!! Unbelievable!
About the other thing… I would say that I feel pretty much the same those past month, first I work too much, then those politics things are happening, may is the month for us… I guess the world is not ok and we can see that through our students or patients and it’s just not right and well… it’s kind of worrying!
I feel you! Take care, take some pics, don’t think about the editing, and do what you love. It helps. Really!
xx cathy

Thanks Cathy! You are right that the world just isn’t right. I’m seriously considering a social media and blogging break during Lent – to ground and re-center and clarify the things are important to me and where I want to go, how I want to go forward. It feels like that might be a good idea. This last week off with friends and family was good. Perspective is good.

Anxiety is the pits and I too am suffering (and probably will always) from the dread feeling which come and then stay..I listen to headspace and have been for almost 2 years. My anxiety is tied to my nature but also life..and I think that I thought life would be easier as I retired and left work,..nope anxiety and it’s NOT so lovely friend IBS are with me today and most days. I think the world is affected by the uncertainty in your country and I cannot imagine what it would be like to be a citizen right now. I am glad self care is helping as is acknowledging the anxiety. I have learned that sharing the news of having it actually helps me and others too. Glad to see your lovely pics as always. DenyseDenyse Whelan Blogs recently posted…Surprise Blooms! 2017.23.

I like to say that I have a basically negative nature and work hard on a regular basis to be positive. I guess that these days the negativity is working a bit harder. I think that you are right – our politics here in the US are destabilizing and disorienting. It almost at times feels like I’m stuck on a that carnival ride where you stand against the wall while it spins furiously as the floor drops out…wondering if the thing is going to fly apart before it comes back together. I am sorry that you are a fellow traveler on this path, but I am thankful for your always encouraging and kind words. <3

Sorry to hear about your anxiety, it is a horrible thing! After my daughter was born I suffered from anxiety and it took me by surprise. I hope things improve soon and great to hear you are getting some help and talking about it.

i am so sorry about your anxiety and hope you are doing much better…my daughter sometimes gets panic attacks, not sure if that is the same, but they are scary…beautiful photos, i especially like the sunset shots…have a great weekend 🙂tanya breese recently posted…Willy Nilly Friday 5 No. 118

Thank you Tanya. I think anxiety attacks and panic attacks are very similar. It’s a terrible thing to go through, and I admit – I was not properly sympathetic to others going through it before I experienced it myself.

A lovely collection of photos – the colours are amazing. So sorry to hear about your recent anxiety attacks… I also battle anxiety, and it can be real tough sometimes, make sure you’re making sure to take care of yourself as well as the rest of life’s responsibilities.

Thank you Jade. I’m finding that the more I talk about it, the more people I find who are affected by anxiety. I suppose there is a sense of strength and comfort in numbers, as sad as it is that so many of us experience it.

So sorry to hear about your struggles with anxiety. Your photos are so colorful and peaceful. Isn’t it wonderful you have the outlet of your photography in this trying time. Any of us could experience anxiety in the future, so I appreciate you sharing not only your problems but how you are coping. Hoping you feel better soon with the coming of the spring!Sharon recently posted…Visiting the British Museum

So sorry to hear about how you have been feeling lately. I am sure you will find a way to overcome this. Keep strong and surround yourself with those you love. Wishing you the best from California!Ruth recently posted…Great Market Hall in Budapest

Beautiful photos here Jen, the colours of the sunsets against the boats are just stunning. I think a beautiful sunset can make any hectic day feel calm, and those lovely pink and purples are so pretty to look at. The silhouettes of the boats against the skies make them all the more prettier too. I’m sorry to hear you’ve been struggling this week, I definitely feel you. The colder, darker days always get to me, so I’m like you, holding out for spring now and waiting for the sunshine and the heat to return. I hope you get the chance to have a rest this weekend and recuperate. I’ve been on a mini blogging break this week so I’ll be joining in again next Friday. – TashaNatasha recently posted…Happy Moments: January

Thank you Tasha – you are always so kind and thoughtful. The seasons are starting to turn a corner here – the days are approaching late spring/early summer highs and the blooms have come on. The anxiety is not as all consuming and hopefully will soon be resolved 😉 I’m considering a bit of a blogging break myself 😉

All these photos are incredibly beautiful!Love the views of sky and sunset behind the boats.So sorry to hear about anxiety.Anyway,it is good that you could find some ways to face it.Going out and capturing photos can be one of the best ways to make anyone relax!
Have a Great Day!Amila Wickramarachchi recently posted…Phnom Penh,Kids City Asia and Endless Entertainment for Kids

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I'm a teacher, writer, and photographer capturing the magical moments of life on the Mississippi Gulf Coast - putting my experience as a teacher and educational staff developer to work crafting stories that chronicle an experience well-lived.

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