Things kids say

So David (11) and James (9) wear clothes to bed (T-shirt and sweats) rather than jammies.

So in the other room, I hear Sarah (15) say to Anna (6), "Go ask Papa." And Anna appears at my side asking, "Can I wear clothes during the night and the day, like the boys?"

"Did Sarah tell you to ask me?" I asked.

"Yes."

"And who am I going to tell you to ask?"

"Mama?"

"Mama. Mama is in charge of the ladies' clothes."

Anna made a sound of frustration on her way out the door. Her parting shot:

"If I were a boy, you could say yes."

Then, in response to the hearty laughter with which I greeted this observation, she grew excited and added, "Write it on your blog!!!" and began strutting around with pride at having uttered a remark that would live on for posterity ... here at Arts & Faith.

SDG, I don't know if this counts as a "things kids say" kind of item, but last night, as I was getting my daughter ready for bed, she began pointing at the letters on my Decent Films Guide T-shirt and asking me what each of them were -- and I was able to associate almost each and every letter with a member of the family ("D" for "Daddy", "E" for Elizabeth, etc., etc.).

The only cases where we "stretched" to connect a name to a person were with the letters "I" and "F", both of which somehow got associated with Elizabeth's grandmothers. By this point, we had already found letters for Daddy, Mommy, Uncle Larry and all three of the kids. So when Elizabeth pointed to "I" and I said which letter it was, she suddenly said "Grammi!" (i.e. my wife's mother), and I figured that might make some sense since Grammi does spell her name with an "I" at the end. But then Elizabeth pointed to "F", and I said which letter it was, and then Elizabeth said "Oma!" (i.e. my mom), which made no sense at all. But since there is no "O" in "Decent Films Guide" to begin with, I figured I might as well run with it. (When we got to "G", I gave that one to "Grandpa", i.e. my dad, since Grammi was already taken care of.)

Three-year-old Nathan has frequently been scolded (and occasionally spanked) for throwing hard things, and we have tried to impress on him that this is high on the list of unacceptable behavior.

So when six-year-old Anna reported, "Papa, Nathan is on the top bunk throwing boots!" and I called warningly from the next room, "Nathan, you aren't throwing hard things, are you?" he realized his error ... and did some fast thinking.

Not really anything Dominic (4) said, but more about what he did. Yesterday, he refused to leave the house and for the channel to be changed. On TV, "In Harm's Way", the 1965 John Wayne Pacific War effort. His first John Wayne and his first B&W. He watched from start to finish. Then played battleships with the christmas boxes. What a kid.

Four-year-old Elise, lone sister of four brothers in a family at our church, is sitting on the potty. Looking between her legs, she announces with satisfaction: "Well, I think my penis is coming along nicely."

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On a related note, six-year-old Anna, watching me sit three-year-old Nathan on the potty, asks the obvious question: "Why do boys have penises and girls don't?"

"God made girls' bodies and boys' bodies different from each other," I start to answer, whereupon she interrupts, "And why did God make boys' bodies with so much extra spit?"

Here's The Wrong Nathan. (Nathan is also 3.) Bear in mind, Nathan has never before come up with anything even close to this.

Suz to Nathan (scolding him for roughhousing with his baby sister): "Nathan, you must be gentle with your baby sister, you must protect her and not be too rough with her!"Nathan (exasperated, with hectoring-questioning tone, as if pointing out the obvious fallacy in Mama's thinking): "Mama, you bought the wrong Nathan...? I belong in a different world."

Suz: "Oh, really? Where do you belong, then?"

Nathan (in same tone): "Back at the store...?"

Suz: "But wouldn't you be lonely without the brothers?"

Nathan (considering): "David could come with me."

James (anxious not to be overlooked): "What about me?!"

Nathan: "James can come too."

Suz: "What if people bought you at the store and they were mean to you?"

We have a toy pengiun that my 7 month old son plays with. It's a little over a foot tall and it is basically a big Weeble - of the "Weebles wobble but they don't fall down" fame. It makes happy noises (laughing and the like) when it gets bumped, pushed, hit, etc... My 5 year old son Ethan was playing with it one day to entertain his little brother when he said,

"Mommy, when you hit this penguin it laughs. But when you hit a real penguin it says 'ouch.'"

We have a toy pengiun that my 7 month old son plays with. It's a little over a foot tall and it is basically a big Weeble - of the "Weebles wobble but they don't fall down" fame. It makes happy noises (laughing and the like) when it gets bumped, pushed, hit, etc... My 5 year old son Ethan was playing with it one day to entertain his little brother when he said,

"Mommy, when you hit this penguin it laughs. But when you hit a real penguin it says 'ouch.'"

That's great. The kid's empathy level exceeds the level encouraged by the toy. Sounds like he's a good big brother, too.