Sunday, January 04, 2009

The 2008 LPOS™ Award

You didn't think I'd allow 2008 to pass without hosting the Third Annual LPOS Award, did you?

Yes, it's that time of year once again for the Annual LPOS Award and 2008 marks the third year of the mrssatan blog hosting this prestigious event. Who will win the coveted LPOS Award this year? First, a brief recap.

LPOS is my acronym for Liberal Piece Of Shit. These are not your standard, Central or Moderate Democrats. No, to be considered a LPOS, one must always be expanding the edges of the outer fringe of Extreme, Insane Liberalism. One must hold the belief that the Nanny State knows no bounds, promoting government - especially the United States Federal Government - into a larger, more bureaucratic monopoly that not only controls and restricts the Free Market but also creates more demand for individual dependency on the government.

Each of the 2008 nominees has shown themselves to be extremely hypocritical, applying a set of standards and judgements to others that they do not apply or hold to themselves or other Extreme Hardcore Insane Lefty Liberals.

They are a myopically selfish group of individuals who subjectively and selectively judge those that do not fully agree with their own philosophies and ideologies.

Their mission of anything politic is motivated by only one thing: Furthering The Liberal Agenda.

Each of these LPOS demonstrates an unequalled and egregious knack for their prejudiced and intolerant political partisanship far exceeding the level of your Average Run-Of-The-Mill Liberal.

Each of these LPOS sets a new standard, possessing an amazing ability to deny both truth and facts, blazing a new trail in setting the bar higher for Liberals who follow them, making it harder and harder to define the Edge of Extreme Liberalism.

Eleven are nominated, but only one wins the world's most prestigious award in unmitigated Liberalism, The oh-so-coveted MrsSatan LPOS Award.

The winner must have accomplished tasks in setting a new standard for, and redefining the edge of, The Extreme Insane Liberal Clown Posse (ILCP, for short) and the Liberal Agenda.

The eleven nominees and contenders - and ultimate winner of the Coveted LPOS Award for 2008 - are presented below:

11: The Reverend Jesse Jackson

You know that a new, redefining point within fringe Liberalism is established when a black man who holds the title "Reverend" is speaking about his fellow black man whom he says is, "Talkin' down to black people,"caught on television via microphone telling another black man that he'd like to, "cut [his] nuts off." The "his" the good, spiritual and loving Reverend was referring to was Barack Hussein Pbama, Junior.

Oh, that Wacky Reverend Jackson, he's done so much for race relations, yes? It sounds as if The Rev needs several remedial lessons on how to fit into our diverse Rainbow of a nation. Tsk Tsk, Rev. Jackson, who knew you harbored such anger and such a violent demeanor.

10: Joy "Big Hips" Behar (one of the two images is, in fact, her - I just don't know which one).

Behar makes her first appearance ever as a LPOS nominee. The 2008 year was full and rich of Behar events that easily qualified her for her inclusion in this most honorable list. Behar's blind political allegiance as a cackling Hen, promoting the distributing Liberal Talking Point Memos was on display on "The View." Her automatic and inherent revulsion of people like Republican guests, such as both John and Cindy McCain was obvious while guests such as both Barack Hussein and Michelle "Pickles" Pbama (the Dangerous Washerwoman) are welcomed by Behar who fawned over them, never contesting, disagreeing or questioning anything they said.

But what really put Behar in the running as a LPOS nominee was her statement in March, during the sex scandal involving disgraced Democrat Eliot Spitzer, who, caught in a prostitution ring, was forced to resign as New York's governor.

For 20 or more years women's rights groups have been telling us that prostitution is not a victimless crime, that it degrades women, leads to wrecked lives, psychological and physical abuse and a litany of other negative side effects.

Behar, (presumably a woman), negated what we've been told by women's rights' groups. No women's rights' groups that I recall condemned Behar's words or issued any type of response registering their disagreement.Remember her words, prostitution is a victimless crime.

It is spFrank's flaming Drama Queen performance on The Bill O'Reilly show that swept him in as a nominee for the 2008 LPOS Award. When confronted with facts, spFrank did the Drama Queen routine, continually talking without stopping, talking over O'Reilly because it was the only defense he could muster. He couldn't answer or respond to O'Reilly, because doing so spBarney would have had to acknowledge the fact that his policies and those of his party sparked the fuse of the economic meltdown.

8: Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg

The next possible U.S. Senator from New York? Unqualified in every way. Never elected to any public office. Never has held any public office. Never been a Mayor, never served so much as the local dog-catcher, oops - Animal Control is the politically correct term.

And The Left made a big deal over Sarah Palin, claiming that she didn't have sufficient qualifications to be Vice President, but somehow, Caroline SCHLOSSBERG, who has ZERO experience somehow IS QUALIFIED to be a U.S. Senator because her Uncle Fat Ted Tumor Head left a woman to drown? This qualifies her to serve in the U.S. Senate, I guess, is how the Libs operate.

In her experience in charitable causes, we find that CAROLINE KennedySCHLOSSBERG puts in an arduous, yeoman-like, exhaustive two-hour work week. From Buffalo News.com:

Federal tax filings show her working about two hours a week for [the] board of the Fund for Public Schools, a private/public partnership that raises awareness and cash for the school system.

Dennis "UFO Man" Kookcinich, an irritating and omnipresent pest - like flies at a picnic or gnats swarming around your head on the golf course - who never allows his political angst to go unnoticed. Did you know that, except for one short stint, the Gnome has never held a real job? His entire career - minus his years of being unemployed, homeless and living with Shirley MacLaine - consists of feeding at the government trough.

He earns his spot this year for his never-ending histrionics typical of those exhibited by someone suffering from a Napoleonic Complex (aka "Short Man Syndrome)" especially with his repeated rants and ravings of, "Hey, pay attention to me, I'm drawing up articles to impeach Bush and Cheney. Again." Nobody cared, Dennis. You couldn't even muster interest from your own fellow Democrat politicians in your articles. There was no real effort to impeach anyone. It was an issue that was to be used and abused and kept alive for Dog and Pony Show purposes and a wedge issue for The Gnome to exploit. There was never any serious consideration given to impeaching Bush or Cheney - it was all for show and hate. The Gnome wasted the precious time and money of the taxpayer with what amounted to nothing more than his own freakish sideshow in seeking attention and personal validation. He achieved - big surprise, not - neither.

6: Hillary "MrsSatan" Clinton

For everything she is, has been and will be; but this year especially for her eagerness and her shameless display of political opportunism at leaving her role as New York's Carpetbagging U.S. Senator to serve as the Secretary of State.

"Whatever is best for the Clintons," is Hillary and Bubba's Mantra, and don't you ever forget it.

Sir Harry doesn't want to smell the stench of the people who employ him. Does the word "Elitist" pop into mind?

4: Keith Olberwiener

2008 marks Olberweiner's third appearance as a nominee. In 2006 he ranked in at the number 10 LPOS Slot. In 2007 he ranked at the number 6 slot. It appears Olberwiener is slowly working his way up the chart and may soon win the coveted LPOS Award in a year or two.

He is included this year for the same reasons he's been nominated in the past; rarely being factually accurate, leaping to conspiracy conclusions, rank hypocrisy, applying much harsher standards to non-like-minded individuals than he does with anyone Left of Center, holding Liberals to far less scrutiny than anyone else and for being the hyperbolic, outrage-feigning piece of shit that he is.

What makes Olberwiener special this year are two things, and no, his lack of bedroom prowess isn't one of them - heck, it's expected Liberals can't perform in the bedroom, they can't do the heavy lifting required outside of the bedroom, why would anyone expect they can get the job done there?

The reasons for Olberwiener's meteoric rise as a three-time nominee for a coveted LPOS Award are as follows:

I'll be honest and to the point: She's a bitch. A bitch, who in 2008, at two different campaign stops, said that she, "has never been proud of her country," until her husband became a presidential candidate. Mammy O' is an Angry Bitch and if writing this angers you, it only means I've hit one of those good ole' "Truth Nerves" that makes you Pbama Cultists scream the loudest.

2: John "Madman" Murtha

Murtha is the winner of the coveted 2007 LPOS Award. This year, he ranks in the Number Two (Number Two as in feces) slot.

Mostly, this Lifetime Achievement Award is bestowed up the LameStream Media for rolling out a fresh red carpet and Nurf-ball textured kid-glove treatment of Barack Hussein Pbama, Junior the Kenyan born Communist who stole the 2008 presidential election with help from ACORN. Never before has the world seen the likes of such a uniformed and blind consensus within the MSM and their collective agenda in selecting someone of whom I proudly proclaim, "He's NOT my prednint."

The reasons for Pbama winning the coveted 2008 LPOS Award are many. But it is the following reasons why I selected him as this year's clear and unprecedented winner:

* He's a cigarette smoker. A cigarette smoker! Remember, for 20-plus years The Left, especially the politically correct and Militant Non-Smoking Nazis, have preached from their pulpit (built with a massive money redistribution from the tobacco lawsuits) that cigarette smoking and cigarette smokers engage in the most disgusting, unhealthy, polluting habit imaginable; a habit they say is worse than a heroin addict writhing in the gutter.

The Insane Liberal Clown Posse and Pbama Cultists have elected a cigarette smoker. How hypocritically self-righteous of them.

* He will be an illegitimate president because he is not a Naturally born citizen of the United States. He is not Constitutionally qualified to hold the office that he stole. He was born in either Kenya or Indonesia, not Hawaii. His Certificate of Live Birth is a forgery. At age 7 or 8 he was a citizen of Indonesia, and Indonesia does not allow dual-citizenship, thus, Pbama would have had to renounce his American citizenship status which means even if he was born in Hawaii he would not Constitutionally qualify for the White House.

* His circle of friends and associates is full of convicted felons, crooks, thugs, criminals and those who are under investigation. No Republican or Conservative could escape the "guilt by association" charges that would be lobbed against them by Liberals if they had friends and associates such as:

Other qualifiers for Pbama as winner of the coveted 2008 LPOS Award include, but are not limited to:

* His reversal on accepting public financing. Oh, how The Left howled and screamed at the ability of George W. Bush to fundraise for his two presidential campaigns. But oh, how The Left remained dutifully silent, demonstrating their unparalleled hypocrisy, when Pbama broke every fundraising record ever set by any political candidate. The most money raised ever, much of it - millions - from questionable sources, terrorist organizations and suspicious "bundlers" - and The Left said nothing. That Free Pass issued by The Left must really be a precious and priceless item to possess, eh?

* Pbama Fake Faintergate. What a pile of orchestrated, phony, rehearsed bullcrap, all concocted by Team Pbama to garner coverage.

In all cases during an Pbama speech a woman would faint. She was always near the front and center of the stage where Pbama was standing. Pbama repeated, verbatim, the same trite platitudes in every instance of these fake fainters:

"Giver her some space. Make way. Can we get an EMT?" And then - right on cue - he hands someone a bottle of water which is passed from one crowd member to another until it reaches the alleged "fainter."

What.A.Pile.Of.Staged.And.Manufactured.Bullshit. And The Pbama Cultists lapped it up like a hungry feral dog lapping up roadkill.

* Pbama's own words of, as Commander In Chief, invading a sovereign country - in his case Pakistan, which - the invading of a sovereign country - is one of the most frequent feigned outrages from The Left regarding George W. Bush and Iraq. See, it's okay with Liberals when a Liberal invades a sovereign country.

We all know - and several studies show - that Liberals are the cheapest people on earth when it comes to charitable giving. Remember Albert Gore, Junior's 1997 tax records showing a total of $353 donated to charity? Recall Democrat Senator entrenched D.C.-insider and soon-to-be VP Joe Biden's atrociously cheap charitable donations. The previous link also includes the story of when Pbama got caught trying to pass off $13,000 dollars to the Congressional Black Caucus as a CHARITABLE DONATION!

Both Pbama and Biden are lying when they claim they support the Second Amendment, the Right to bear arms and when they claim they support the Supreme Court decisions that affirmed Heller and concluded that the language of the Second Amendment does indeed apply to the "individual" to bear arms.

* Then there is Pbama's Hitler Youth. This chorus from Pbama's Children of The Corn is creepily reminiscent of the involuntary indoctrination of children into Communism and eerily Orwellian, inserting children into divisive political propaganda no different from terrorists who teach their young children to hate America and Americans as well as Jews and Israel.

Among the litany of other offenses and lies spoken and committed by the Man Born in Kenya, there were two cinching accomplishments for Pbama winning the 2008 LPOS Award. Believe it or not, neither reason had anything to do with his being born in Kenya or Indonesia and his phony birth certificate that claims to be authenticate and indicating he was born in Hawaii - he wasn't.

The second was his hissy fit reaction to the press of "enough is enough!" Poor Pbama got tired of the press - what did he expect? Awww. Poor Baby! It sounds to me as if - to quote "South Park's" Eric Cartman - Pbama has "sand in his vagina."

The first - and by far, the item with the greatest proportional value - is Pbama's Braceletgate, his moment of, "Hey, look at me, I wear a Military bracelet too," during a presidential debate with John McCain who had mentioned his Military bracelet.Braceletgate was followed by the family of the deceased Soldier, whose name is on Pbama's bracelet, saying that they had asked Pbama not to use their son's name in his poltical campaign, but Pbama is too egotistical and selfish to respect their wishes. Pbama, an Arab and a stealth Muslim, born in Kenya or Indonesia, wearing a Military bracelet pretending he gives a shit about the death of an American Soldier. And The Left belittled Ronald Reagan as "just being an actor,"?

Be proud Barry, and keep that birth certificate hidden. You don't want anyone to find out you've never been a naturally-born U.S. Citizen, that if you were you renounced it and that your entire candidacy is a sham. Remember, since he's not a naturally-born U.S. Citizen as defined in the Constitution, no act, law or treaty he signs will be valid. Everything he does will be illegitimate, just like he is.

Due to the length of the 2008 LPOS Award post I eliminated a list of Honorable Mentions, but feel free to add a comment of who your favorite LPOS nominee was for 2008. And yes, Al Franken would have been in the Honorable Mention department.

Finally, proofreading this piece was a bitch and I'm sure I will find spelling errors and typos when I review it. I triple-checked the links within the post and they all worked and opened into new windows. Please let me know if a link you run into is disabled, bad or otherwise unavailable. Thank you.

I found a mistake, though. You mistakenly placed a photograph of Senator John F'n Kerry circa 1975 where you meant to place Caroline Schlossberg's. Thought that you would want to know that. Shit, he was ugly even then.

Wow. What a post to start with. The LPOS! With so many worthy candidates, this is going to be a tough one on the judges. I will have to spend more time to read through and consider all that you have outlined. There is just too much to process. I don't even know where to begin and the Leftard cannibalistic feeding frenzy has only just begun. It's gonna get good. Real good. Also, let me say...Go Blago! Keep shoving it far up the asses of your fellow Leftardocrats you glorious back stabbing LPOS. Shove it real good.

Thanks. Happy New Year, man, I hope it's a good one for everyone...but then I remember who stole the election ;-)

As I replied to Two Dogs, likely I will be away from updating on a daily basis more than I will be with it. Things beyond the blogosphere, some of which I have no control, are taking up my time.

You are spot on about how corrupt the DemocRAT party is with Blago. And now TODAY BILL RICHARDS WITHDREW HIS SERVICES FROM THE OBAMA WHITE HOUSE DUE TO AN INVESTIGATION IN WHICH HE IS PART OF!

Ahhhh, the perfect Culture of Corruption of CommieCrats Continues. Suprised? Naaaah! Sure was good thing none of this about Richardson or Blago came out BEFORE the election, huh? What timing on the part of the MSM. What a coincidence.

Maybe the first thing Pbama will do on Jan. 20th is provide for all Americans free, mandatory attendence lessons on how to speak and understand Arabic?

Oh, boo-hoo-hoo! Obama won and now America won't be run by incompetent, corrupt fascists and loons any more!! And we were so close - after eight years, we were just months away from finally destroying America's economy and civil society, you betcha, and then we could have really made those fake Americans pay for refusing to believe our fantasies and lies!!! Waaaaa!!!!

Sounds like you swallowed the sweet pill of Liberal Denial. What a way to go through life; you must be proud of yourself.

So who are you, really? Only cowards comments anonymously. You're writing reminds me Fester - is that you Fester? Perhaps Cliffy the dipshit? What sad pathetic losers you all are.

Hey, I bet you were one of those deficit hawks who pissed and moaned about how Bush is deficit spending. Now that your messiah plans on doing the same thing, pushing our economy further into debt and deficit, you're just fine with it because Pbama is doing the spending, right? DIAF.

Will you respond to this comment? No, because you're a cowardly pussy.

Well, you have a point TD, but you have to remember when dealing with comments like the Anony above, it's like speaking to a puppy during the potty training process or like speaking to someone with severe brain damage. One must speak s-l-o-w-l-y and LOUDLY and allow for the fact that they still won't understand what they're hearing. They're too busy, still steeped in Bush Derangement Syndrome.

But after they swallow the pill of Liberal Denial there's little hope left for them.

The country will indeed be run by inexperienced incompetents and fascists under Team Pbama.