A "mostly" humorous look at real events - short stories, satire, and the vagaries of life. Join me on the couch. The doctor is wacked, but in.
"A merry heart doeth good like a medicine..." Proverbs 17:22a

Friday, September 6, 2013

Child
number two down with fever and big time cough. He's had a nagging
cough for two weeks but was handling it and getting better until
yesterday when he tanked after lots of school, late nights, and early
mornings. Schlepped him to the doc earlier today only to find out that
our beloved doctor quit and is now a work-at-home
mom (sad for us but happy for you, Dr. C!). Sooooo, naturally, my
patiently-putting-up-with-me friends, we had to get a NEW doctor within
the practice. And BOYYYYY was she new. Like
just-bought-a-stethoscope-on-her-way-to-work
new. Young, no wedding ring, so probably no children but she knew ALL
the theories and all the answers, even to the questions I was apparently
too mentally challenged to ask.

I was informed that I had
neglected my 18-year-old son. He would not have been so sick if I had
been treating his Reactive Airway Disease (seriously? When did he get
that? EVERYTHING is a disease these days including getting a secondary
infection when you've had a cough.) Had I only had him on his inhalers
that had been prescribed for him in March (mind you, that was for the
PNEUMONIA he had which cleared completely and he never coughed ONCE
after it did), he would not be sick today. And when asked if he was
running a fever and I said, "Yes, but only around 100," I was informed
this is NOT a fever. It is not a fever until it is 100.4. I think his
was only 100.3. And no, I could NOT get cough medicine with codeine to
help him sleep even though it works like a miracle. Older doctors write
for that but those of the brand-new-stethoscopes don't anymore. It's
bad for them (though they take it only 3 or 4 nights a couple of times a
year). But they should live on daily meds and inhalers for diseases
they may (or more likely do NOT) have. Boy, the THINGS I'm LEARNING!
And she wrote a prescription for antibiotics but it would not cure his
airway disease, she informed us, because I was apparently wearing an
expression on my face that looked as if I thought antibiotics cured
everything, including incredulity. I expected CPS to be called in any
minute. Except, being 18 and all, it's hard to find the right foster
home so, maybe we'll be a low priority.

But I think we can ALL
agree that I AM neglectful and just don't amply treat my children or
seek appropriate medical care, as is evidenced by my adult daughter who has been to four doctors now and had 2,874,389 tests run in the two months she has been sick with her mystery illness. Not to mention holistic approaches like healthy organic food, massage, stress management, and even travel to a healthier climate.

Time to get my son established with this adult daughter's doctor. We've been in the
same pediatric practice for 23 years and we've had wonderful ones and
you-can't-be-serious-and-you-did-NOT-just-say-that-to-me
ones; watched 'em come and watched 'em go. THIS one may go but if not,
she's in for a rude awakening. I may have been sitting before her and nodding like a demented bobble head (seriously, NOT worth the battle),
but there WILL be others after me (I'm almost done with pediatrics) who
will school this dear girl so full of knowledge and devoid of wisdom.
You cannot accuse and dismiss experienced moms VERY often without your
life becoming terribly unpleasant. Thank you, Dr. Who
(must-not-be-named). I AM writing a book about these
migraine-making-medical-mishaps
and you just gave me yet another chapter. But hey, UNIVERSE, now hear
this: I'm REALLY okay now. I have enough material in so many areas of
my life and it's time for you to share with someone else. Seriously.
Next in line, please! I have to go now. I have children to neglect, for
Pete's sake.

Sass, I bet we down-the-road moms will be fairly gentle with her because we know what we know. The new moms may be impressed with her because she's trying desperately to establish authority and show what she knows. But the moms in the middle will be the ones to school her. They know enough but also have a long way to go. They won't respect her unless she draws breath and finds out what THEY know and who they are. Right now, SHE doesn't know what she doesn't know. I hope she figures it out sooner rather than later. I think she wants to be helpful in her own way but she forgets she's only half of the equation. And thanks for knowing how hard that was for me to shut up!

Jackie, it won't be me because I'm gettin' outta there! Shakin' the dust from my sandals and not looking back. I'd like to be a fly with you, though, when the parents who are going to cut loose! :) Love to you, too.

Well, look who is in the waiting room! Robynn, I've missed you and your wonderful humor. Although I wasn't aware that you are a neglectful mom. Made me laugh but hope it's going to get better in your home soon. Are doctors getting dumber or is it just me? :-)

Oh you are in rare Robynn form! Its ironic to me in a way that in today's world, we have to assess our doctors as much as they walk into a room and assess us! We have to sort of find that we can work "together" as a team, or it just doesn't work at all. You're beyond wise in knowing how others will "school" her. This is definitely the "book" that needs to be written!!

Reminds me of the Urgent Care Doctor who missed my daughter's leg with the aerosoled "freezing spray" (instead she got my arm across the table-TWICE) and proceeded to scapel my daughter's leg without any anesthetic. Yeouch!

Same Dr. for my next child didn't know what was wrong with her knee, but went to her office to GOOGLE. She brought me back two printouts of what it might be and oh-by-the-way, let's put her on mega-steroids that will have her throwing up. But, don't worry, we have meds for the throwing up too. Daughter was 9 years old. No, thanks! Called my son-in-law's Father (physical therapist) who gave me some exercises and homemade therapies and she was as good as new in two days. Crazy!

Moms should ALWAYS go with their guts. Sometimes that means see someone else!

outOh, it is so good to have you back! And thanks for your comments on my blog.....such a joy to see your name and your words again.

However, re your current kvetches I fear I cannot be of much help except to sympathize. I am hugely lucky to have been able to gather a stable of doctors who are brilliant and sympathetic with competent, caring staffs. I wish I could share them with you. Are you perchance in southern California?As for your reluctance to try to fill the chasm that Kitty Baby left in your heart.....I can only encourage you to do it. It is true that when you love you always risk pain, but you gotta take that chance. Think of it this way.....there is some poor waif out thee who needs YOU and the rewards of saving a needy critter are boundless. I hope you will take the leap. I think you will be glad you did.

So glad you are back! And...YES, I have met some of those new doctors who have lots of opinions and not so much wisdom! My favorite pediatrician when my kids were growing up was the unpopular one in the practice - but he would actually give me credit for having some sense and ask ME what I thought occasionally!V

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I am a deadbeat blogger who has been absent for almost three years after posting over 300 blog posts. Now, I have the audacity to think anyone is still out there. But if you are, I'll try to start posting again at least once every three years. And I'm committed to that.