I was a kid in Redwater, Alberta, which is 2 hours west from where I live now. The town boasted 1000 residents, though my dad always said when some one died they had to change the sign. They didn't, of course. In Redwater, Halloween was an event the kids looked forward to. Small, like very small children under three who could not toddle out on their own with an older brother or sister did not go out. They went to bed. Everyone participated, though we did not go everywhere. Basically we went up and down our street, but not to the end, and then as we got a little older, we ventured a few more streets away, but never across the tracks. That was just too far. Halloween trick or treating ended when I was about 11. Teen agers were considered too old to participate and were discouraged from going out or being out. There was little trouble and although I don't know for sure what the adults did, it seems that most stayed home and gave out candy, then went to bed.

Tonight I was in St. Paul, one of the local towns here. There were not that many houses near the hospital and schools with their lights on or with jack'o lanterns lit up. That is one of the things we did, carve a pumpkin. When my own kids were of that age, I split a pumpkin in half and used half for pie or muffins, rather than waste the entire thing. The back was then wrapped with tin foil and there was a small tea light candle inside. It gave the same effect as the whole pumpkin, but we did not have a lot of money and I was frugal. We also made our own costumes, yes, the kids, not the parents. I did make some of my kids costumes, and cannot recall purchasing one ever. Today's kids wear store bought costumes. They are missing half of the fun creating their own identities by not making their own costumes. When the kids were quite small, I made them pyjamas with polka dots on them, which they wore as clown costumes with my lipstick and eye liner marking their faces. Afterwards, they had a whole year's wear out of the pyjamas.

It is rather amazing that Halloween has become such a big event in a Christian world. The decorations for Halloween have evolved to wreaths, trees, air filled gigantic statues, plastic creatures that make weird sounds and so on. It is truly amazing what people will buy. The decorations are out with the Christmas items at the beginning of October.

What happened to the real celebration? Samhain and Beltane were ancient celebrations of the waning daylight, the loss of the growing season and the pining to release the darkness and bring back green. It is believed the veil between the unseen world and the seen world is the thinnest on Halloween night. Witches, or suspected witches were burned for so much as using a herbal tea to sooth a sore throat. At a time when doctors were not quite practiced and recognized, the old crones with knowledge of herbs and cures could have been of great value to the people, yet they were disdained in the name of Christianity.

So, St. Paul is likely not much different than many places these days. Kids don't make costumes and pumpkins are plastic. Everyone gets too much candy made with gmo ingredients that keeps the population sick and the adults drink too much alcohol. I am not sure how this all happened, but I would welcome the real Samhain celebration if I knew where to find one, over the commercial circus Halloween has become.

I have been out of school only five years. That is not a long time really, and I am thinking, yes, with technology, things certainly would change quite rapidly, however; if I compare my own schooling to the expectations of students today, well, it cannot be compared.

We were good kids truly. The kids today are good kids too. They want what we all want - to be liked for whom we are and not disliked for limitations that are beyond our control. There were kids who had trouble with the times tables when we had to learn them. I remember well, Mrs. Klufas, grade 3, saying to us that here is a the times table, and to learn it for next week. Our every moment was consumed with the times tables. We drilled each other endlessly. Out in the playground at recess, we still drilled each other. The times tables were so sunk into our heads by the time the test came, that no one, not even the kids who had trouble, actually failed and failure was less than 80%.

Why did we force this learning upon ourselves to diligently and willingly? Mrs. Klufas was the principal's wife. She was strict and stern and we were scared to death of her. She used the strap. Early in the year, likely to just show us exactly what we could expect if we failed to live up to her demands, she strapped every single one of us in the class. It snowed, the first snow of the year and we were told to go out for recess and not to get wet. The snow was wet. We made snowballs, snow angels, and splashed in the slush and when we came in, we were soaked. She made us remove all our clothing except the underwear and hang items up around the room and she gave each of us a strap on the hand. So when she said, "learn these times tables for next Monday", we did. No questions or excuses.

Today, in all three math classes, the kids did not know the times tables. Their work would have been so much easier if they did. I asked if they were taught them and if they had to memorize them. They were taught them, but did not have to memorize them because there are calculators these day. I think that is a terrible disservice. Yes, we have calculators and I use them, but Mrs. Klufas, thank you for enforcing the learning of the times tables. Of all the things I learned in school, reading and simple math are obviously the most valuable.

I wish the kids of today had some motivation to learn the times tables. I would not wish Mrs. Klufas on them, though some slightly gentler motivation would be most appropriate. Back in the day, we did not dare neglect our learning and today, learning is approached with such casualness that it does not seem to be taken seriously. How sad. I guess I am really, really, old. Back in the day...hmmmm. Are you old too? Did you learn your times tables?

In the summer, to cut down on wasted hay and to make the cleaning of the pens in the spring easier with less to clean, I spent a lot of money on hay nets. The nets are working to save hay, sort of. The sheep and goats do not eat like horses. Horses, the animals the nets were actually designed for, are happy to munch slowly and not jump on top of the bale. Goats, on the other hand, want to jump, climb, and terrorize the mound and they do, with the sheep right behind them. What happens as the hay is eaten is that because the animals are on top of the hay, the manure and urine goes into the hay that they are standing on and then they only eat what is still more or less standing.

But clean up of the filthy net is something I absolutely hate. I am not strong enough to lift the wet manured hay net off the ground, so I must get the skid steer and pick it up with the forks. Then I can find the end and loosen the ties and get the spoiled hay out of the net. I have to get the animals out of the way first though, so they need to be sent to another pen. That is easy now, since the other pens are empty, however, they will shortly be occupied with breeding pairs. Then I will have to take my chances that the critters will know enough to get out of the way. If I bring a new bale of hay or feed them in the feeder that should keep their interest long enough for me to deal with the hay. I still will have to open and close one gate that will have some animals in it that should not intermingle with the animals in the pen. Now, rethinking that plan, if I leave the sheep rams in the pen who are not breeding and put breeding goats in the first pen, if the goats do get in with the sheep, I won't have major problems.

So, tomorrow when I get home from work, the task at hand will be to pick up the filthy crapped on net and empty, refill it will a clean bale, remove the twines and then bring it in for the rams. It is also time for me to split them up into breeding groups, but I will need some assistance with that task. Hooves will need trimming and checks for worming need doing. I am trying to keep sheep that manage their worm loads on their own. The ones I do not keep are the ones that are always needing to be treated, like the Blue Faces Leicesters.

I have plenty of hay for the winter, based on previous year's usage, though in those years without the nets, I would venture to say that up to 50% was wasted by the sheep and goats. This year that might be cut right down to 10% and that alone is worth the consternation and trouble associated with the changeover of the nets. With hay costing $150 per bale this year, the reduction in waste will make this hobby farming manageable, I think.

So, tomorrow, the grungy, gross task awaits me when I get home from work. Sigh. I am trying to think of the positive aspects, the hay saved, the money saved, the happy sheep and so on to muster the determination to do a job which I do not relish in the least. Got any suggestions?

In this photo, the only part of the bale the animals are interested in is the clean part still standing. That which they have trodden on is soiled and wasted. But, when compared to the amount they would waste with conventional feeding using the feeder, it will be monetarily worth the trouble to change the net, plus in the spring, the clean up will be greatly reduced.

freshly unmolded soap. The other side has cacao batter in it. When it is cut, some of the chocolate will transfer to the white.

What? You mean washing with soap? or soap for washing?

No! Washing soap is what I mean.

When soap is made and then cut, there are tiny fragments and colour bleeds on the cut surfaces. There are also rough edges and sharp edges. Some soap makers bevel the edges with a potato peeler of a special soap beveler. I know a smooth edge is softer and more pleasurable in the hand, and the experience of using hand made soap can be wonderful, so I do understand the concept. But, most of my soap is rustic and plain unscented, the way I believe soap was meant to be. I am not one for all the fancy swirls and colours, things embedded in the soap, glitters and glitz, and stinky smells. None of those things are healthy, most be derived from chemicals which are not necessary.

Soap was meant to be a cleanser, however; it can also be moisturizing and treat the skin to some wonderful qualities from the unique properties of the oils used, and the herbal and botanical ingredients can contribute as well. There is no hard and true research indicating just how much is unaffected by the lye, but most of the ingredients are not saponifiable, meaning are not used to make the soap in the chemical reaction between the lye and the fats, so they are left behind to be part of an exquisite bar of soap.

But, back to the washing. Rather than bevel the edges and then spritz each soap with alcohol to polish it, I just wash each bar. The timing is crucial. The soap cannot be too hard, nor too soft. If it is too hard, the edges do not soften enough and if it is too soft, washing it washes the soap away. For cleaning two colours from one another, washing is ideal though. The soap I just made is a pumpkin seed oil goat's milk bar. Pumpkin seed oil is fantastic for sensitive and mature skin, so soothing and moisturizing. This soap also has the benefit of alphahydroxy acid from the milk, which naturally exfoliates on a minuscule level without harsh grit to irritate the skin. The skin is left supple and smooth with an imperceptible coating of the oils as a moisturizing quality, but not enough to feel greasy.

Soap and water also create a synergistic relationship. The first time soap goes to water, magic happens. The soap glistens and smoothes and readily lathers. That first lather is rinsed off and then the soap sits and dries and cures for weeks to months to years, depending on the type it is. This soap will cure for approximately 6 weeks, until the moisture content remains constant. Then it is at its optimum for longevity and usage.

So, yes, I wash the soap. It saves bevelling and smoothing, and polishing with alcohol and leaves the soap pristine and lovely. Which bar would you like to try?

The chocolate bits and cut bits are on the newly cut soap bars

After washing, the soap is nice and smooth and there are no chocolate bits or rough edges on the nice bars.

Now that I am a substitute, I know that the district is too small to offer daily work. Bonnyville is only a half hour away plus there is Kehewin First Nations, ten minutes away. Kehewin is looking for a substitute teacher, so that is a good option and I have already sent a note to the education head to learn how to apply.

There are several other irons in the fire as well. For several years, I have been studying aromatherapy. My university degree of years ago involved massage. I learned every aspect of the anatomy and care and prevention of injuries, including massage. Gosh, I even won a little award for my touch! So, combining the two, there is spiritual massage, a combination of healing touch and essential oils to help people feel better. The province of Alberta prohibits anyone offering therapeutic massage without an extensive course in their schools, and they do not recognize my training at all. I asked. The only shingle I can hang in this avenue is to go through Reiki or something similar. So I will.

Then there is wholesale soap supply. I have had two people ask if I would/could make soap exclusively for their business. One is a local greenhouse. She is very busy and would like a line of simple soap for gardeners. Easy peasy, but whether it is lucrative enough to produce in small batches, I don't know. If I could put my name on the bars, and offer them to her at a discount so we each make a couple of bucks, that would be better. We are talking. The other, well, we are just starting to talk.

And of course, I could rent the bed and breakfast house. There is a single mom who has three kids, nice mom and kids, who might be looking in the near future. Or just rent the upstairs, which is more likely, so that I have the basement to continue to sort and liquidate things. I managed to sell some rolls of fabric today, yahoo. Every hundred dollars in the pocket is a space open in the house. That is a win win situation.

But everything takes time. Nothing happens overnight, unfortunately, and no matter how I want things to be the way they were, they are not going to go back either. As long as we have this recession in the oil patch, business here is difficult. Everyone I speak with is feeling a pinch, even people I would not suspect, like the baker. She said their business is way down and they don't know what to do. Of course. With 5000 or more people gone from the Lakeland district, that is going to impact everyone.

I am fortunate and grateful to be able to keep going. The man who rented the pasture is supposedly coming this weekend to fix the fence and pay me. Then I can pay the hay man and the grain man and all is good. Other than my car, which is acting up badly with slow starts and might cost a lot of money to rectify, there are no major expenses coming up. All is well at the Fat Ewe Farm and the irons are in the fire for now. Stay tuned.

this lovely fabric was purchased to make slip covers for the seats in the motorhome, but the motorhome is sold. Now, so is the fabric.

Now that I am a substitute teacher, I see that hoping for 10 days a month might be more than is available here. But, I need to work 10 days a month to have enough income so I do not struggle. The system is such that when a job is posted, even requesting a particular substitute, any sub can apply for it and grab it. The only way to ensure the sub wanted gets the job is to phone him/her and work together at the same time on the computers so no one else can grab the work. This has already happened, where I was requested and the next instant the job was taken by some one else. Not understanding the system, I inquired as to why that happened and it was explained that a request does not mean a certainty. Too bad for me. So, I phoned the school that had requested me and told them why I could not fulfill the position they requested me for. They had no idea that another could grab the position either. We both learned something today.

I have only been out one day. Today I was not called out and there were zero jobs on the boards. I am registered at 7 schools and there were no jobs. This is so different than in the Surrey School district where there are tons of jobs and a sub can pick and choose, however, Surrey is the largest school district in Canada, so that is par for the course.

The hard part for me, is I go to bed late and sleep late. Not knowing ahead of time if I will work or not, since the board can call at 6 am or as late as 7 am for work, and I have chores to fit in there too, is hard. I have tried to go to bed earlier so I am up early and am not tired. If there is no call, then I guess I should get up anyhow and get used to getting up for work, though if I only get one call a week or so, what is the point? I may have to look for another part time job or make enough soap to sell wholesale. I may have one client interested in carrying the soap in her business, but then I am working hard for less money again. Argh!

I am not sure what to do now. I was thinking that I would have at least 10 -15 days a month subbing, but it might be as little as 5 -10. 10 I could survive with. 5 I cannot and be comfortable. The good thing is that there is feed for the animals for the winter and there should be no more major expenses coming up. On my teacher's pension I cannot save any money and fall short every month a little. This is not quite what I thought it should be like and was hoping the substitute teaching would solve my dilemma. Now what?

The merry little garden in White Rock where my mother is in a nursing facility. This garden is kept by the people who are living there too, but who are able to still do things. The bleeding heart flowers are pretty and echo my plight at the moment.

At the Fat Ewe Farm, there are a lot of hunks, the farm boys. The sheep and goats, plus Wilbur the potbelly boar and some ganders, drakes and roosters make up the male population around here. Oh, and of course, Barclay, the Riggit Galloway bull would have to be included and the boy dogs and one cat.

I visit the boys every day. There is usually one of them in trouble some how. Yesterday it was the Shetland ram with his horns stuck in the net, though usually it is Stevie, the wonder goat.He gets himself stuck in all sorts of predicaments. The rams and the three goat bucks are together now, and have been most of the summer. They all get along and as time progressed, I added a ram lamb or two when they began to show interest in breeding the little girls in their pen. This year I have kept all the lambs so far. There were no accidents and everyone was bred on purpose for a purpose, the wool mostly.

The problem I am facing is where to put the groups to keep them safe and allow them to be together for breeding. I have been busy building shelters and penning areas off,but am still short two pens. That is the trouble with keeping so many different sheep and goats. There are three bucks, one Angora, one Kiko (meat) and one Nigerian Dwarf each to be with the respective females. The Nubians will be bred to the Nigerian Dwarf next year because he is way too small to do that job this year. They will have to be bred to the Kiko.

Then there are so many different sheep breeds and all those rams to sort out. First everyone needs to be dewormed where they are, so the worms are shed there. Then they can leave and I will only have that one or two pens to clean up. The female sheep and the female goats are in one pen and the rams and bucks in a different one.They cannot see each other, or some one would be trying to bust out already. The Kiko goat is peeing on himself to make his smell irresistible for the ladies, and although I think he stinks, they actually love that and come up to him and rub against him.Go figure.

It will be fun getting them dewormed and hooves trimmed in preparation for breeding. That has to be done next week. It would be great to get it done in a day, and I could get some help though I will see. I wish all the rams were as friendly as Friar and Jackson, the Babydolls.Quinn is fairly calm around me too, but the others have to be chased down into a pen. Robbie will help with that. What do you think of the Fat Ewe Farm Boys?

Dragon's blood, now doesn't that conjure up some interesting images? And Mongolian bells? Are those the sort that the monks ring in meditation or what?

Dragon's blood is a resin, called a tear, that appears when the bark of a species of coton tree is cut. It is deep red in colour and is full of compounds that the Amazon peoples have used since time to heal many conditions. It is also a powerful tool in the cleansing of the spirit. At one time it was very precious and difficult to obtain, therefor guarded. Those who had some were careful to expose the fact to strangers, just in case the stranger realized the value of the resin. It is also used in incense and although it does not have much of a scent, it is attractive to have burning.

Now, what does that have to do with Mongolian bells? The bells were hung around the camel's necks traditionally, and were to announce the approach of the caravan. They were also to alert anyone in the desert to the presence of a caravan, because for days on end ,the caravan could travel without seeing anyone at all. There is some thought that the bells had a spiritual purpose, though that is not widely accepted. Not much is known about the Mongolian caravans really.

Dragon's blood is no longer a terribly expensive commodity, with the advent of world travel and trade. The coton tree that it comes from is rather remarkable, with a slim trunk and then an umbrella of intertwined branches with a canopy of leaves on the top. There are more than one variety of the coton tree and the resin can be collected from any of them. I bought some from an online source to use in soap actually, but have since discovered it does not dye the soap for long because it interacts with the lye and becomes neutral, losing the rich, deep red colour. So, I will burn it for incense instead.

The Mongolian bells are for the goats! Since I do not have a caravan of camels, the goats will have to wear them. The sound of the bells is soft, not at all harsh and it acts as a slight deterrent to predators, plus helps me find them when they are in the bush. They have not gone in the bush for a month or longer now and I am not quite sure why. Possibly it is because they have eaten all the leaves they like and are stuck with the grass now. The bells will be a pleasant sound. I have three different sizes, so even the little goats will get to wear one. I bought three big ones for the cows too, though I have no idea how I am going to get them on the cows. It is not like I can say, "Here cow" and they come running and stand still. I can pet Kylie and maybe Barclay, but Shona is still not going to let me come that close. But I have a bell for her.

​So, the enticing title is not so exciting after all. I had you going for a bit though, didn't I?

This is the resin that was going to go into the soap. It is with alcohol and oil to dissolve it. That deep red colour doesn't come through much.

this is October 24 of my first winter in Alberta. That is 5 years ago tomorrow and the weather outside is lovely at the moment.

The first year I left the coast, it snowed in October, and the next year it did too. Last year and this year, we have no snow and very mild temperatures and it is almost November. Speaking with the locals, they say that Halloween was the ear mark for snow when they were kids. Some years they wore snowsuits under costumes and other years they hardly needed coats, but right after Halloween, there was going to be snow.

Right now the weather is very warm, even t shirt warm. I have been working outside with a very light jacket and have felt more comfortable with it off than on. This is always a good thing, since the fall is such a scramble to get everything picked up and the ground clean for winter snow removal. Bones and sticks immediately seize snow blowers, so they must be removed prior to the snow. Any loose cords running along the ground need to be elevated too. The first year I forgot I had a heat lamp plugged in the chicken coop and ran the cord over with the snow blower ruining it. It is a good thing I also did not electrocute myself!

The weather predicted this winter is supposed to be amongst the mildest of all winters with temperatures well above the average. The second year I was here, the average seemed about 40 below the entire winter and it was quite cold for much of last winter too. I did some research on the warm winter predicted and the polar wind is broken. For as long as man knew about the polar wind it had a tight vortex around the pole, but now with global warming and ice melting, the circle is broken, sometimes allowing arctic air into Alberta, like last year, and sometimes keeping the warm air here, like this year is supposed to be. The broken arctic wind pattern will only mean elevated global warming. Already my home town, White Rock, felt a hot dry summer this year. I remember 1969, when we are something like 42 days of straight rain in White Rock. But look at California, a once rainy warm land, now desert. We need to change the way we plant and harvest water now to prevent that from happening on the Canadian west coast.

For now, I am thankful for the break in the weather. The extra days are much appreciated to finish the winter tasks, especially now that I am back in the work force. I am looking forward to a mild winter here. What do you think?

It is definitely fall and there is not much green to be seen around, but the stream is not frozen and the ground is very soft this fall so far.

Tomorrow marks a new beginning, an end and a start, a continuation and a cessation. It is the start of a new job in a new land,but a job I am well familiar with, teaching school.

I started teaching in 1977 and ended my career in 2010. There were years off in between for child rearing and exploring new careers and many part time years when the children were young or when I was occupied in a new business venture. But teaching was my bread and butter occupation and my fall back career, the one that provided a pension, health benefits and insurance for the family. This was paramount as a single mother. The children were always my first priority.

Then the time came when I could retire. After living with my parents and caring for them for 10 years, well, my father for 5 and my mother for the entire ten years, I was very much in need of a change and a chance to divorce myself from consumerism and the dictates of fashion. So,I left my home in paradise, White Rock, where I had lived for most of the previous 50 years, and came to the frozen north.

Things were moving forward very well, with the bed and breakfast winning rave reviews from the patrons and the farm bringing me joy and camaraderie. Then the bottom fell out of the oil industry and the economy took a dark downturn. It was necessary to close the bed and breakfast, however, the income was and is sadly missed. At first, the plan was to rent my little house,but I was depressed living in the other home and the prospect of renting my little house sent me on a downspin. So, I made the decision to go back to work and to move home to my beloved little house.

It took Alberta a long time to process the application and finally I am in. There was never an interview, which I think is rather unprofessional. The most shocking fact that I have learned is that teaching is Alberta is very lucrative compared to British Columbia. According to the scale, I would earn over twenty thousand dollars a year more here doing the same job as in BC. If the right position presents itself, I will accept it and work full time. Then for the next few years, I will have the opportunity to rebuild my fortune, subdivide my land and become comfortable once more with a better ability to help my children, now young adults, have a healthy financial start to their lives too.

I am grateful for the opportunity to go back to work. At my age (61) and with the huge number of unemployed in this area, having a job is a really good thing. The pay for a substitute teacher is not on par with BC though. I suppose they pay their regular teachers so well, that the substitute teachers take what is allotted for them and hope for a job. This opening will allow me to meet new people and possibly make some friends. I hope to be able to offer them some of the products I make for sale and possibly sell eggs as well. And tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life. Wish me well!

The beautiful sea side town of White Rock, my home for most of my life. With every new beginning, there is apprehension and some remorse.I loved White Rock, though needed this change. Tomorrow will bring a new juncture in life for me.