Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Be here Now by: Julia Goda

Six years ago, Loreley Cooper thought she had it all. Head over heels in love with her boyfriend Jason and ready to take on the future after college, she landed the internship of her dreams. But things came crashing down during a fight, when she believed she found out he’d done something she knew she could never forgive. Completely heartbroken she walked away and hasn’t talked to him since.
Now, six years later, Loreley is recovering from a painful tragedy that almost killed her. Finally finding her way back to herself, now famous rock star Jason Sanders storms back into her life and seems determined to win her back. Why he would seek her out after all this time, Loreley has no idea. She has sworn to never talk to him again after what he did.
Jason Sanders is determined to not let the love of his life walk away from him again and is willing to do anything and everything to make her give them another chance.
Misunderstandings are uncovered and secrets are revealed that lead to pain and heartbreak yet again. Will they have what it takes to forgive each other and themselves and fight for their happily-ever-after or is it too late?
“Chris, what the hell is going on?” I asked, resisting the pull of his hand on my elbow and stopping about ten feet from the stage, planting myself in front of him.
No, I was not going up there tonight. No way.
But Chris didn’t answer.
What he did instead was lift his chin to someone I couldn’t see behind me then he grabbed my upper arms and turned me so that my body was facing the stage and he was standing behind me. He didn’t let go of my arms.
What the hell?
I felt someone crowding me on my left and looked to see that Cal was standing close. He looked at me with warmth in his eyes. To my surprise, there was no worry there, but I could see the same determination and anticipation I had seen on Chris’ face. Then I heard a “Fucking finally,” grumbled on my other side and saw that Nathan had joined us. His arms were crossed on his chest and his grin was big and proud.
I opened my mouth to again ask what the hell was going on when I heard a guitar being strummed on the stage. Surprised, I whipped my head around and stilled when I saw who was sitting on the stool in front of the microphone.
It was Jason.
Chris’ grip on me tightened and Cal moved in closer, but none of that registered with me. All I could do was stare at the man on stage, too overwhelmed and confused by what I was feeling to move. People all around me started cheering and shouting Jason’s name as I stood there, frozen.
Then he started speaking into the microphone.
“All right everyone. Calm down for a second, so I can talk.” Almost immediately, people started to calm down and waited for him to go on.
Which he did.
And what he said made my breath catch in my throat.
“I know this stage is supposed to be christened tomorrow, but there is something I need to say to someone that’s important to me, something that couldn’t wait another second.” His eyes drifted over his audience while his fingers lazily strummed his guitar. Then his eyes found me and he zeroed in, holding me captive with his gaze as he kept speaking.
“You see, I’ve been in love with a very special girl for a very long time. I’m a man and men can be stupid, so you can probably guess that I fucked it up and made her leave me.” Men were chuckling all around me in agreement. “Since then, everything I have done I did thinking about her, missing her, wanting, no, needing her to come back to me. Of course, she didn’t. She was too hurt by what happened and I never heard from her again. It’s been six years since I held her, six years since I touched her, kissed her, made her laugh, and pissed her off. Six very long and very lonely years.” He stopped and kept strumming his guitar almost lovingly as he held my gaze with captivating intensity. “And when I finally got my head out of my ass and went after what I wanted, what I needed to feel whole again, I promised myself that this time, I wouldn’t give up, that this time I would fight, even if the thing I had to fight was her, until she was mine again and then I would never let her go. But life’s a bitch most of the time and things didn’t turn out the way I had imagined. See, she had a secret, a secret she didn’t think I deserved to know, a secret that, upon finding out, nearly destroyed me.” His voice broke a little on those last words and I could feel tears well up in my eyes yet again. “Her words almost destroyed me and still, I couldn’t leave. Even after everything that’s happened, after we both said and did things to hurt each other, she is everything I want, everything I need. I realized during the past few days that no matter what, I will never be able to let her go.” Goosebumps were covering my whole body at hearing his words and I shivered. Then he stopped talking to the crowd and addressed only me. “So I’m here to fight, baby. I’m here to fight and I won’t give up until you take me back.”
Then he played and sang the most beautiful song I had ever heard. He sang about love, about pain, about strength, and about forgiveness. He sang about the agony of losing the one person that makes you feel whole, about the ache in your chest when you know you lost the other half of your soul. And he sang about not giving up, about doing whatever it took, giving everything to deserve that love again.
And during the whole length of the song, not once did Jason’s eyes move from mine.

I have been writing stories in my head since I can remember. Much to my teachers’ dismay, given the task of writing a short essay I would always come back with way too long and detailed stories. Many discussions (I have always been somewhat of a smart-aleck) and bad grades were the result, so that for most of my life I thought I couldn’t write worth a damn and pursued other careers. But the dream of being an author wouldn’t be ignored and kept lingering. With a little help from my fantastic husband, who gave me the necessary kick in the behind, I was finally brave enough to start writing my first novel and finished it only a few short weeks later—well, the first draft, that is. The seal was broken.
My novels jump genres and touch on all kinds of different topics, but the things I try to focus on no matter what are romance, strong women, and a good sense of humor.
Now, when I’m not in my writing cave, spinning the tales that have been hounding me or editing (yes, I am also a professional editor, guess that degree in Literature and Linguistics turned out to be useful after all!), I enjoy reading, drinking coffee, eating good food, and listening to rock music.

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