APRIL FOOL: Poo-pa Roach for Sonisphere 2010

Could this be the end of smelly festy-loos?

01 April 2010

Sonisphere Festival will trial a groundbreaking new process that uses live bugs inside festival loos to process the sewage
on-site, removing bacteria and the associated stink

Dirty, smelly toilets have always been considered one of the biggest downsides of live outdoor events (backed up by VF's
own 2009 UK Festival Census). Fortunately, this could soon be a thing of the past.

Scientific researchers at the University
of Cambridge have, we are told, pioneered a biological (rather than chemical) method to treat human effluence within the festival
toilet itself, removing the need to export and process sewage off-site, and eliminating the unsavoury smells in the process.

The
system employs a specially-bred bug from the Triop family (Triops australiensis) of crustaceans (pictured) which will live
happily in the bottom of the portaloo (replacing the traditional blue chemical liquid) chomping away on anything that happens
to be dropped their way. The faecal matter is then filtered within the creature’s digestive system and secreted with
the bacteria almost entirely removed.

The concept has, apparently, been successfully trialled for the past year on
a small scale within the university Halls of Residence and now SonisphereFestival is going
to play host to the next step: a major trial at the event that runs from 29th July until 2nd August.

The hundreds of
portable toilets on site will each have an average of 50 of these critters placed in them to deal with the waste created by
the 60,000 music fans. It is anticipated that as mostly nocturnal creatures they will be most effective overnight, ensuring
a particularly fresh experience the following morning for the festival goer.

Professor Peter Murtagh
of Cambridge University says: “We are absolutely delighted that Sonisphere has given us the opportunity to
push out this major scale trial. It has the potential to completely change how human waste is treated, not just outdoors.
Our hope is that one day, all homes will have Triops ready and waiting in their lavatories.”

Stuart
Galbraith, CEO of Kilimanjaro Live, the promoters of Sonisphere adds: “We get contacted throughout
the year by people and organisations who have an idea that they think might work at Sonisphere. This one was too good to pass
up. If it works as well as Professor Murtagh thinks it will then maybe people who won’t go to festivals because of the
toilets will reconsider.”