I had heard something about authors writing stories for DC a la mode of Lovecraft. Jubilee kinda fits that description, but it's a bit early. Like practice, maybe?
Anyway, strong story, and especially topical what with the BP-created kill-zone in the Gulf. Norm had it right in his comments about imagining such a thing in the atmosphere, a cloud of suffocation.

And who's is this blood on my shoe? Aghhh!
I have met Cthulu, and he is me!
Yeeks.

Verily, what is more terrifying than our inner darkness?

Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am

Finally getting to this one on my expanding list of podcasts. Just passed the drabble. I loved the sound effects; at first I thought the hammer was too soft, but then it kept going... and kept going... by the fourth time, even I winced as it hit.

Overall I liked Podcastle's story better myself - more just from a mood perspective than anything, I guess. Podcastle's story ended on a note of hope and beauty, whereas this story, while ultimately kind of optimistic, was pretty darn creepy. :p

Poor little misunderstood fish warrior things. I wonder if his dreams and the thing on his hand suggest he's actually going to turn into one of them. (that would make the ending more sinister than optimistic).

I loved the drabble. It was just amazing. The main story was also good, but I found it really painful to listen to the main character trying to work through his grief. Maybe he would be happier if he turned into one of the fish warriors.

tbaker2500 wrote:Oh hell yea, that was an awesome drabble! Going to play that one for the peeps at work.

One of my favorites in a long time.

I think that I'm going to steer clear of the Drabble section of the forums from now on. Even the ones that don't make the cut are pretty impressive, but Norm's reading of this one was far superior to the one in my head and I sort of spoiled the ending for myself.

"Sometimes I believe in as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
"That is an excellent practice. But right now I'd suggest you concentrate on the Jabberwocky."

I overheard my wife tell her friend the other day that I often say things that only I can understand.

I'm willing to grant the possibility that what she said was true, but I still wonder how it is possible to know such a thing.

Either my English Degree has not apparently helped me in the one area you would expect: the ability to communicate ideas. Or the ideas themselves are ineffable. Did she not just confess what men usually lamely complain to their mistresses? -My wife doesn't understand me. I think I could get that notarized.

But that, St. Tom, is our shared condition. We may be disappointed that we are not understood. We may feel like voices crying in the wilderness. We may even experience a certain shaming from people who like their white bread straight, with mayo. And since they are stuck with us, would we please keep our weirdness in the toy box when we're finished playing, otherwise how can they explain us to their friends?

But this issue goes also to the heart of the Drabblecast, its product, and its prospects.

I love it here for the same reason that naturalists love their nudist colonies. I don't want to keep my weirdness in the toy box. I want to wear it proud, like Cyrano's nose. I'm disappointed that your peeps didn't connect, because it proves the point that DC isn't for everyone, although I believe the world would be a better place if it were.

Maybe we need something like a Strange Pride Day to let people know that we're here, we're queer (*uh* taken*) and we're not going to take it any more. No more of this 'Don't Ask; Don't Tell'. If you don't understand, go ahead and ask, dammit. And we'll tell you. Maybe Bo could design a bumper sticker for us that says:

The Drabblecast - Not all queers are gay

Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am

One co-worker thought that the hammer was to place a rivet or a snap in place. Others just waited for a punchline. The truth is, their mental framework didn't expect that style of weirdness. Now, that being said, later in the day while I was playing my iPod thru speakers, I got a request to play "Fetus in the Kitchen", by one who didn't get the drabble. So I wonder if there is a adjustment period, where, given exposure to oddity, normal minds can adapt.

What you're saying is that we may not be the next advance in human evolution that we thought we were?
O darn. That's disappointing. I always liked the Superman fantasy. But ROU says it doesn't turn out well anyway. Apparently, you can't get away with life as an RPG (outside of Cons).

But you may be onto something. Perhaps we can infect normal minds with the Xenophile Virus.

Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am

The problem is that this reminds me of another story I really liked- was it even in Drabblecast or was it Podcastle? -about a guy going after a mystical all knowing catfish after his brother died? The problem is I liked that story and the ending better. The themes are so similar this seems like a b-movie imitation.

You can't keep a soul in a box. You gotta wear it proud. It's gotta be yours, not someone else's. -Sing

I liked it. I thought the portrayal of grief was genuine and moving. I take it that those who thought it was meh do so because either this area fell flat for them or there just wasn't as much action as they are used to in a DC story?

I agree with veganvamire that some of the inner narrative from the MC's brain/working out process could be edited out to make the story a little less cumbersome. Norm really hit on the head in the outro all the things that the story said well to me. Does anyone think the story could have been effective sanz fish-creature, or sanz jubilee? I'm just wondering. We here at Drabblecast as all used to chipping off stories to the essential 100 words, wondering how much of the fantastic was necessary in this story to get across what it did.

It may not be Annabelle's Alphabet, but Pratt throws some excellent and beautiful scenes here, I'd have to go back to quote them. And the music was creepy and perfect, Norm's reading was very powerful.

And yes, this Drabble has my vote for next year's People Choice Award already.

moonowl wrote:Is it against the rules to not be thrilled over a Tim story?

The problem is that this reminds me of another story I really liked- was it even in Drabblecast or was it Podcastle? -about a guy going after a mystical all knowing catfish after his brother died? The problem is I liked that story and the ending better. The themes are so similar this seems like a b-movie imitation.

Like everyone else, I LOVED the drabble. I liked the story itself a lot, too. The grief in it felt very real. The punchline was nothing particularly unusual, but the horror of the protagonist's loss was unusually stark and vivid. I would not have been surprised to hear it on Psueudopod.

I'm glad everyone is enjoying the drabble. I knew when it took shape that I had one with wide appeal on my hands.

This was a key-phrase one. That is, the opening line/refrain popped into my head and I wrote it down, and from there it was just a matter of extending "In the factory that makes teddy bears..." out to a logical conclusion and the traditional twist.

---

I've found that drabbles tend to have a few different genesis points, at least for me. There are the striking-image stories, which are usually just a matter of setting the frame just right to catch the image in the 100-word limit without being confusing. There are key-phrase stories, that have some sort of poetic or chant-like rhythm to them. The striking images are usually hard to trim down, while the key phrases tend to take work building up.

Then there are the twist endings, setting up a familiar trope in order to subvert it, and the recombinations, where familiar tropes are blended together or mashed up in a hopefully enjoyable way. Those are both pretty easy and tend not to need much trimming/editing. The last kind, and the rarest for me personally, are the punchline/pun-based stories; those tend to just be a matter of comedic timing, and I find the 100-word limit to be particularly difficult to address in that situation.