Ladies who lunch? Hardly.

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Let the president have his basketball games and workout routines; the congresswomen prefer meat and potatoes. (Art by Wuerker)
Illustration by Matt Wuerker

These personal connections matter, say the congresswomen, because women still remain a minority in politics — even after Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin played central roles in last year’s election. In 2008, women gained one seat in the Senate, bringing the total to 17 out of 100, and three seats in the House, moving up from 71 to 74. Women now make up 17 percent of all House members; 16 percent of all senators; 16 percent of all governors; and 24 percent of all state legislators.

“Men play golf together, work out together at the gym. And the problem is, as women, we’re not just busy being legislators, we’re trying to run our families, too,” says Rep. Diana DeGette (D-Colo.). “I never had time to learn to play golf.”

DeGette, Tauscher, McCarthy and former Rep. Darlene Hooley (D-Ore.) first started meeting for dinner soon after they all came to Congress in 1997. A few years ago, they decided to invite some of their Republican colleagues to join them. McCarthy reached out to Emerson, whom she knew from their work together on the NATO Parliamentary Assembly. The group quickly became regulars at Monocle.

Of course, business occasionally does come up. The women tend to stick to fairly noncontroversial issues, such as a breast cancer awareness bill or pieces of the health care reform that they agree should be included in the legislation moving through the House this summer.

But mostly the conversations center on the lifestyle issues that are unique to the job.

DeGette, who won her seat when her daughters were just 2 and 6, now acts as an informal adviser to other women on how to balance congressional obligations with the needs of young children.

One tip she gives is to buy dinners at meal preparation stores. For several months, DeGette went to a prepared food store in the suburbs — where she wasn’t likely to be recognized — and would buy two weeks’ worth of dinners. When she was in Washington, her husband and children could reheat the frozen meals. The system worked, she says, until her family started complaining that all the food tasted the same.

“That’s a unique issue to women like us, because we’re just not home during the week,” she said.

The dinners are also a rare chance for the congresswomen to socialize with friends. When they are home, political events, family obligations and district business quickly eat up most of their time. But in Washington, the women can sometimes grab an hour or two for some female bonding.

“Most of us are here during the week, and our families aren’t, so it’s the perfect opportunity to get to know each other personally,” said DeGette. “Then, discussions about legislation can grow out it.”