My husband and I both work at home, and there are entire days we speak to nobody but each other. After reading the story this morning of the Downes' decision to die together, I told him that, though I love him dearly, he needn’t come with me when I cross into eternity. "Actually," I joked, "I’ll need the quiet."

In truth, I think it would be unusually cruel to our children to lose both parents on the same day. As Kerry points out, death is our
universal prognosis
, but each in our own time. Until then, when we lose a loved one, we are obligated to mourn, keep our dear ones in our hearts and memories, and soldier on. The Downes' son,
Caractacus
, and daughter,
Boudicca
, accompanied the older pair to their Swiss death beds, and though both were named for legendary warriors, presumably the two feel a deep human loss for their parents. I understand the shared devotion of the elderly couple, happily married for 54 years. But no matter how deep our love for one another, allegiance must be to the living.