The Queen of Disks, painted by Lady Frieda Harris for the Thoth-Crowley Tarot.

With gratitude and appreciation to Linda at LiteBeing for the invitation to participate in this 2014 end-of-year ritual.

As part of this blog ritual, Linda invited us to reflect on our experiences during and the gifts of this past year using these five questions (why not join in and journal them yourself?), and then share our responses via the blog-o-sphere.

So here goes …

Linda: Which lessons did you learn?

Jamie: Two biggies include additional clarity about certain long-ago-conditioned patterns and the ability, in seeing them, to begin a sort of disentangling and non-cooperation with them.

That big pattern-reveal really started in the few years leading up to, and then through, an extended Chiron Return (thank you, retrogrades!).

Another lesson taken to new depths in the last year was around a greater and healthier degree of what I’ll call ‘self containment’. The ancients called this sovereignty or virgin, to be whole unto one’s self.

The Priestess, by Lady Frieda Harris for the Crowley-Thoth Tarot.

One element, maybe the element, is learning to be much more discerning about where my energy and focus goes, what I share with others (and with whom I share certain things) and what I keep close and incubate.

With attention goes energy, so part of this is becoming aware of those ingrained energy siphons and leaks that we’ve been conditioned to see as ‘normal’, and making more conscious choices about gathering my energy back or intentionally giving it to what has heart, joy, and meaning.

This isn’t something I’ve mastered, by far, but progress made this last year? Yes. And I’ll be practicing on this one in the coming year and beyond. It’s an ongoing project!

Linda: How did you serve others?

Jamie: Often, it seems to me, in very simple, humble, quiet ways — those random acts of kindness, listening (often to perfect strangers), cleaning up (the proverbial sweeping of the hearth and washing many, many rice bowls), more freely letting inspiration pour through me into my writings and client work, tending my beloved felines and a neighborhood feral as well, becoming more devoted to the practice and super-power-magic of blessing and being a Believing Mirror rather than the opposite.

Those kind of Virgo-Vesta Mysteries of everyday acts of services that often go unnoticed but are important; they add up and can have an alchemical, if not necessarily recognized, positive or healing effect. There’s something just … satisfying about those little yet not-so-little things. Hearth-tending, like the Vestal Priestesses of old, and our ancestor-women.

The Empress, painted by Lady Frieda Harris for the Crowley-Thoth Tarot.

But also there was an Earth-serving component,not just in doing the ‘reuse, repurpose, recycle’ and that sort of thing, but in learning much more about the wild plant allies and doing spontaneous blessings for the spirits of place, this place where I dwell. This is very much a deepening of the Wise Woman Way.

That was so amazingly awe-inspiring! For the first time since I was a wee girl, when I just knew these things, I really had a sense of the wild abundance we’re surrounded by — gifts from Mother Earth — and I was in awe … and it was really fun.

Linda: What blessings did you receive?

Jamie: The things I’ve just mentioned are blessings, to be sure. Plus, the friendship of my anam cara is such a blessing — our ongoing conversations and believing mirror practice. I can say that’s been a lesson, too, about believing mirrors and diminishing mirrors and taking much more care about which I wanted to be, because I know just how deflating and disheartening it can be to be surrounded by diminishing mirrors who seem to find glee in … well … diminishing others!

Plus, ongoing conversations with friends at a distance, thanks to technology (and occasional, telepathy!). Inspiration from fellow bloggers and walkers of The Way. The blessings from the wild plant allies. Much more time with my niece and god-daughter. There are so many, really; despite some stiff challenges, blessings were plentiful, too.

Linda: Was there something you lost that turned out to be a blessing in disguise?

Jamie: Well, honestly, 2012-2013 completed 7 and 9 year cycle, and a larger Jupiter cycle as well. A lot of deconstruction (aka Pluto as ring leader) in that cycle, peppered with loss. That relentless ‘on your knees and picked clean to the bone’ kind of Inanna-Persephone Initiation cycle.

It was also really rich, with treasure too, but very much the via negativa path — an ’emptying’ cycle whose aim is to uncover what’s true and authentic, because it sure does get covered up and paved over!

A real blessing this past 15 months or so is that that degree and velocity of loss calmed itself over this past year and a half, allowing the dust to settle a bit.

So this past year-plus, in that field of smoldering wreckage that had been ‘life as I’d known it’, I noticed fresh, green shoots emerging from the ashes and compost — a new greening, as I’ve called it before. Very phoenix, right? From late 2013 and through 2014, I noticed a sense of actual progress building. That’s pretty woo-hoo-hoot-worthy.

There is also a new receptivity that can come when we’ve been emptied out of all that clinging and striving, but oof! I wouldn’t wish that level of deconstruction on anyone!

Also, getting scrubbed clean of some seriously unhealthy conditioning — those things we come to believe early on are normal but they’re a toxic normal, including in family dynamics. Having those particular rose-colored-glasses shattered can feel brutal, but what starts growing out of it is a sort of clarity and liberation. Very Uranian-Pluto!

The Priestess of Bacchus (1889), by John Collier.

Linda: Did you receive any “gifts” in terms of powers or skills?

Hmmm. I guess I’d say the answer to this is in the above, but they all add up to a very Saturnine gravitas and resilience that come out of persistent initiation experiences, and that really does feel like a gift, albeit a costly one. Saturn is surely a Master Magi teacher and gatekeeper for Wisdom, Sophia.

It’s very much like the counsel of a medicine elder, who said, “The false foundations erode again and again, until the abyss itself becomes your foundation.”

Or as Hafiz wrote, “Love turns you upside down and shakes the nonsense out of you!”

I can’t say that I’m there yet, but I’ve felt an incoming tide of that gravitas … a hint or sense of real foundation that isn’t rooted on externals which can, and often do, shift in a moment’s notice. That’ll be continued learning and practice, too.

Many thanks for the invitation to share these blessings and lessons and gifts from this past year, Linda at LiteBeing!

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Sophia's Children

Jamie is an inspiration partner and lantern-holding guide for her fellow transformation leaders, change catalysts, and creative nonconformists who are living, inspiring, and leading the change in these chaotic times.
She's also a long-time servant of the Muse and writer, as well as an intrepid walker, feline-tender, and has great appreciation for dark chocolate and cooking other nourishing, delicious meals to share with her peeps.
Thanks for visiting! Wishing you well.
Learn More: http://sophias-children.com

31 thoughts on “Reflecting on 2014 – A Year-End Blog Challenge”

Thank you Jamie for a splendid offering and joining my tribe this year. Seems like we may be about the same chronos age, hehe, guessing from some similar astro cycles. We also share a major Saturn emphasis. You described the energies with insight and flair. I also would not wish the challenges of my year on anyone ( the losses especially), but understand that all is necessary by virtue of its appearance in our lives.

I really enjoy your creativity and wisdom as well as the kinship of another Gem moon sibling! WP seems to be brimming with our kind and for that I am grateful.

Thank you, Linda, and you’re most welcome. It was fun to participate, so thank you again for the invitation. Yes, it was a real change to be out of the crosshairs of the Uranus-Pluto square, particularly once they nudged out of the first decan (first 10 degrees), so this last year really did feel so much more calm (which felt weird after the cycle of hub-bub). First decan Chiron Pisces have had the Chiron Returns now, second decans are in the Return zone, and third decans are likely feeling the initial breeze of it approaching. But yeah … Sun-Saturn here, with Cap south node and mercury, so Saturn’s a presence. Saturn in mid-Scorp lit up a t-square, so there was that. 🙂 I’m sorry you experienced the deconstruction and losses as well, though yes, it’s a particular sort of initiation. Here’s to the gemini moon sisterhood! Love, Jamie

My Ascendant Uranus and Scorpio planets ( kindasorta TSquare) got trampled by Saturn. As you know, when an involved configuration gets activated, it is much more intense than Saturn conjunct , squaring or opposing a personal planet( which can be plenty in itself) I have both Saturn and Jupiter in Cap( almost conjunct) Saturn sextiles all my Scorp stuff ( Neptune Sun Merc ) and opposes Mars in Cancer.It also trines Pluto and occupies my 11th house. It is the ancient ruler of my Chart as I have Aquarius rising. Sometimes I like to pretend it does not rule my chart. I prefer modern ruler Uranus!

Anyway I also lived through my Chiron return and it was tough too. I have Chiron in the first so it is prominent. Chiron makes us strong healers and teachers, yea! Saturn gives us substance and teaches us whatever we have glossed over eventually 🙂

love talking astrology with you and happy you were one of the blessings for me for 2014.

Oh, fun. 🙂 Really, some lovely aspects there. Plus, there’s more to Saturn than meets the eye — he was also the magnanimous (aka ‘healthy yang/Masculine’) leader of the golden age, in some tellings! — and that’s not often reflected in traditional astro. Even the old gods and archetypes want to be redeemed and/or evolve! Ha! Yes, having the dual rulers of Aquarius can be entertaining, or annoying, depending on the day, eh? Chiron through the 1st in the natal chart (looking at the solar houses can be interesting sometimes too)? Saturn through Scorp would have squared the Leo and Aqua stuff, and oppo’d the Taurus stuff (for anyone out there who’s felt the Saturn weight-and-pinch and didn’t realize it!). Here’s to making good use of all of those Saturn pearls, since there are lots of people having epic shifts and deconstructions now who are looking for lights (and handy ‘fyi’ notes) along the way. 🙂 Thanks for sharing! xoxo Love, Jamie

A lovely reading of your year Jamie… Lots of releasing of old ties, especially ancestral is what resonates with me now too… Emptying ourselves for OURSELF… I hope we can both enjoy each other’s journey into the unknown.. Barbara x

Thank you, Barbara. Yes, with Pluto in Cap (and whatever other things), releasing some ancestral legacies (and discovering ancestral gifts and strengths, too!) is a big theme for sure. Yes! Definitely, as we release some we create room for unexpected gifts. Here’s to Divine guidance and good will as we continue stepping into the unknown. xoxo Jamie

Thank you, Lisa. I’m glad you enjoyed the musings. I enjoyed your post and the questions you share, as well. These weeks are perfect for these reflections! Holy Day and New Year blessings to you! Jamie

beautiful and vulnerable sharing..thank you for expressing your journey so openly and with such grace. i was reading through some of the comments and saw you mentioning capricorn south node…and i have capricorn north node…another counterpart reflection. i also loved that you shared about your anam cara….an expression not many use, but is dear to me, and actually tattooed on my arm in connection to mine that is beyond the earth plane now. much love to you!

Thank you, Tania Marie. How beautiful that you’ve tattoed the Anam Cara ~ I think of the late Dr. Emoto and the power of the written word in the energy field. It’s really such a rich and fortunate thing, the Anam Cara, as so much of that (now being reclaimed) ancestral ‘true wealth’ and wisdom is! Happy 2015 to you! Love, Jamie

yes, you hit the nail on the head…it is dr. emoto’s work that supported and influenced the work i do as a sacred tattoo designer…that what we wear on our skin/bodies will have a vibrational effect/shift on the water body we mostly are made of. ❤ and hugs!

Sounds like another Saturn Sibling’s (or Saturn student!) comment. 🙂 And yes, it’s something I’ve been reflecting on for a couple of years now … that it seems that Saturn is the gatekeeper, the master teacher, for Wisdom, Sophia. To get to Sophia, you go through Saturn. Still musing on it, though, but it makes sense from my own experience. How about yours?

I need some time 🙂 *sigh* I guess that’s my expression of Saturn. Mercury sextile Saturn. I’ll be back with more to bring to my reply. I am a sibling, no doubt. Time to click “follow” 🙂 Looking forward to the unfoldment… for this is my temporary response. Another one is already formulating. Nice to connect ❤

I understand that one completely! Take all the time you need; there’s space for it. 🙂 (We just had a sharing about ‘time’ on Linda’s LiteBeing blog … complete with ‘what day is it?’ musings. 🙂 ). You’ll find that one here: http://litebeing.com/2015/01/07/waiting-on-the-world-to-change/. Really lovely to connect; just followed your blog as well. xoxo J