So currently lying here in a consulting room with a bunch of gauze and gel up my bum.

Had a mishap on my ride this morning and tore my ring hole. Waiting to hear back from the surgeon as to whether I have damaged the rectum muscle as well. If so I will be going in for surgery, if not they will just stitch me up.

however, you are WRONG about hospitals being boring. have a look around you - there is always entertainment - people in backless hospital gowns checking themselves out to find some smokes, drug addicts who keep asking if the doctor is ready to see them every 45 seconds..

I was sitting up as it snapped, seat came off and I went straight down the post and landed on the tyre. Bike was moving and I wedgied myself with the wheel. Pretty much left butt check on one side, tyre running along the butt groove, the right butt cheek the other side

Obviously the spinning wheel on my butt hole ripped it open. Wife collected me, I was just going to have shower and clean it up but when I git home there was a lot of blood and things didn't feel right down there.

I am going in for surgery now too. Is a 3cm tear and then they want to make sure there is no internal damage. Need to have me under a general to do that.

Worse case is damaged rectum and scfincta which could mean a colostumy bag till the internal damage has healed. Best case (fingers crossed) is just stitches and a sore arse for a few weeks.

This brings back memories from a few decades ago when I was riding my BMX and my seat stem broke and I fell onto my rear wheel and the "nether regions" were jammed between the wheel and the brakes as the bike came to a screeching halt on the gravel.Thankfully no damage to myself (those Faberge jeans must have done their job)...but perhaps this explain why my Wife and I had twins all those years later ?!?

I was sitting up as it snapped, seat came off and I went straight down the post and landed on the tyre. Bike was moving and I wedgied myself with the wheel. Pretty much left butt check on one side, tyre running along the butt groove, the right butt cheek the other side

Obviously the spinning wheel on my butt hole ripped it open. Wife collected me, I was just going to have shower and clean it up but when I git home there was a lot of blood and things didn't feel right down there.

I am going in for surgery now too. Is a 3cm tear and then they want to make sure there is no internal damage. Need to have me under a general to do that.

Worse case is damaged rectum and scfincta which could mean a colostumy bag till the internal damage has healed. Best case (fingers crossed) is just stitches and a sore arse for a few weeks.

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Could have been worse, but only just....That's right up there for painful and unfortunate injuries!!I think the indignity of checking yourself in to A&E would have been terrible too....