My journey as a single adoptive mom to two teenage boys who spent years in foster care and a toy dachshund puppy, a westie mix, and a shepherd mix. Some might consider our home a combination of homeless shelter, fraternity house, and humane society. I call it home.

Younger Boy got out of the car and never looked back. No wave...nothing.

Older Boy started talking about Captain America.

My heart was breaking. I had been bracing myself for a sad goodbye. I wanted them to care. I knew that it might be a goodbye void of emotion, but I wasn't prepared for just how emotionless it really was. It makes my heart break for all of them all over again. For their inability to create bonds. For all of the goodbyes they have had to say and for all the times they have had to walk away and not look back....couldn't look back.

I am grieving for them. Grieving for the lives they might have had and the things they might have done. For a life free of all the heartache and pain they have had to face in their young lives....pain like most of us will NEVER experience.

Bear with me the next few days as I work through this. The roller coaster probably isn't going to stop any time soon.