When we adopt something new into our lives, like a hobby or a new skill, everything seems fresh and fascinating. We enthuse over it. We believe that it is something that we want to keep doing, and something we want to master. We get overly excited to pursue it at the beginning, but as the positive emotions start to cool down, we stumble on a rockier path with mixed emotions that block our passage—often leading to a dead end.

When we are facing difficulties, our emotions try to take control of us. Some might say that they’re benign emotions in that they advise us not to do something lest something bad would happen to us, but… they certainly aren’t helping us with success. You see, they only try to scoop us out of the immediate situation that’s causing anguish. They can’t rationalize the possibility of long-term merits. In other words, these protective emotions don’t care about the future. They only react to the problems at one particular moment, which is their primitive job.

Your emotions: Be not discouraged by these petty shortcomings. We’re just warming up. The path can get rocky at times, but together we will overcome these feelings of frustration. We now command you to persevere and press on. The fruits of your labor are just around the corner. You can do it!

You: You guys are right. I can do this!

The Missing Ingredient

Think about it for a minute. In the end, what does it really come down to? Honestly.

Let’s assume that you are learning how to earn enough money from online marketing to quit your day job. What do you need to accomplish that? Let’s bring out the essential ingredients.

Application. You have to apply the principles you’ve learned. Obviously.

Right? These two ingredients should get you to your goal. There is just one missing ingredient that will ensure that you reach your destination.

Perseverance.

If you are able to persevere and continue your efforts, you will almost certainly arrive at the desired result. Some people get things done faster than others. You can do it too if you’re able to work on it consistently and without giving up. Everything you’ve worked on so hard will be lost the moment you choose to give up. And it’s your decision. Only you have control over that decision. No one else can offer the last ingredient to you. So it’s your responsibility to finish what you’ve started.

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7 Comments

Jenny

Sunday, January 22, 201210:22 am

Thanks so much. These two weeks I’ve been devastated after almost failing a language exam. I nearly gave up. This article has helped me see through the fog of my emotions. I knew the emotions were clouding my sound judgement. Thanks again. I’ve worked so hard to get to this stage, and I’m glad i didn’t give up.
Thanks for showing me, to look beyond the veil of my emotions.

So we give up because… what is missing is perseverance… well, what a discovery.

So, how to get perseverance… well, we get perseverance when we are honest with ourselves, when we REALLY DO what is important to us… then, you never give up.

So yes, emotions are there. But instead of annihilating them by reason, use your reason (mindfulness) to look at them ” in the eyes”… you are frustrated, fed-up, angry? This is GOOOD, this is telling you something… what is telling you? Not to give up, not that it may not be for you (well, may be, but if you reach this conclusion immedialtey this is indeed giving up!)… frustrated because you did not get your exam, or success, or nice answer from the boss… well, write it down. what is exactly this frustration? You feel stupid? you blame yourself? you will never make it? The parent is beating the child (transactional analysis).. you feel ashamed? well, FEEL AND LET GO.. but feel. If you deny it, it will come back next time, piling up.. sort this out immediately. If you cross the stream once, the next cross will be easier and the day you face a river you will not be afraid.

You’re right, Ceinweena. You have to face the problems directly and not let them bottle up.

When the emotions crop up, it’s often good to take some time off the project and let your mind decompress. It’s better to forget about it for a couple of days than to keep stressing over it.

As it tends to be with most things in life, breaks can do wonders to enthusiasm, interest, and overall productivity. Just don’t let the breaks evolve into inaction. Remember to resume when your batteries have been recharged.

You’re right Eric. That’s what i’m doing wrong – I’m very happy with the new hobby and I end up stressing me, discouraging me and giving up. I’m gonna tell you my story: I’m 16 years old, i’m from Portugal and i play the piano and sing. In the beggining i loved to play piano (with 11 years old). I was always in front of the piano keys… When i started to learn most difficult things, i almost gave up on my instrument. But at the end of all, i did it, i conquered my first big goal – keep playing the piano. With the singing happened the same. I gave up, “i took a interval” and then, i worked hard and i did it again. Now, i have to keep conquering my goals but now i have a big deal to do – i want to lose some weight, get some muscles and so, i have to do some workout. When i have a difficult thing to do, i tend to give up early. This morning, i wake up and thought to start the day doing push ups and working out my abs. I gave up. I went to the Google and i searched: “Why do i give up so easily?”. I found your site and i instantly entered it. What i have to say is: Thank you so much Eric! For a person like me, so perfectionist, so hard worker, even in my summer holidays, what i really think that my problem is, is lack of inspiration and motivation. I usually go to YouTube several times, searching for some motivational videos. What is that mean, really? Why do i need motivation? If i want so bad to be a pop singer, to go to the USA and to have a enormous artist career, why do i need motivation? And what is the best way to keep me motivated?
Sorry for the english mistakes. Thank you for such a great blog! Maria Dias Silva

It’s important to face both good and negative emotions while persevering towards a new goal. It took more than two decades to understand and finally accept that not everyone in my family was accepting of me moving towards positive goals; in fact, they were the primary obstacles in my path towards success because they were jealously angry of my available skills to find opportunities that benefited me. I found these negative people were often critical of me and my success and fed into my insecurities. Once I made a conscious effort not to be around them and surround myself around positive winners, then I found myself really moving towards my goals.

Thanks, this was a great article. I needed to hear this because I just started a fitness program to not only look better but feel better and have more confidence. I’m not overweight, but I’d love to be free of certain insecurities I have with my body that I most certainly can control. I was so positive in the beginning and worked 7 days a week for 2 hours each day (I know that’s a bit much to start with, but I was excited and determined), but as the days go by, I skipped on day because my sister(who is my fitness buddy) because she was sick. I wanted to wait for her so I did. It went from 1 day to 2, to 3. Then as soon as she got better to went to a friends and im left here thinking, great I have to do it alone, and it shouldn’t have been that bad, but I was used to not excersicing and I lost the drive to, so I ate ice cream and watched Netflix instead. I felt guilty but I started feeling that maybe I don’t need to do this and I don’t need it, or I can do it later, excuse after excuse. This article reminded me to stay focused and keep looking long term.