Welcome to Let's Play Corruption of Champions: The Definitive Walkthrough Guide. I'm Rio and I'll show you everything there is to know about this game as far as I understand it. I will go on the record and state a lot of what I'll be saying, especially story wise, is speculative as I rarely read any of this games 3123 million words. As such, all my commentary will be written as a stream of conciousness. If I remember something I'll add it as I'm writing, I won't be going back. Hopefully you'll get to understand the nebulous understanding I have of this game's world and characters.

So first we need a name. A good name. A mighty name.

Excellent.

Next we have the option to choose our gender. This is where the choices we make for our character will begin to matter. In Corruption of Champions, just like IRL, men have numerous advantages over women. Statistically (-4 strength lol) men have the better setups in terms of starting stats, as men are mostly physical and women are more sexual, which is useless. Women must also put up with several random events that punish you for being that gender, whether it be fairies sexually molesting you or a quest line of a furry raping you, women have it off a lot worse. Technically, women gain access to the highest single damage weapon in the game, but requires you to do things that are Bad (big shocker, I know). So, if you ever wonder why I exclusively play men, those are my reasons.

Now comes the meat and potatoes of our character. Build will determine our starting stats, as well as superfluous information I believe such as "thickness" (weight) as well as our starting height. Each build gives you a jumble of stats, usually ranging from 10 at the lowest and 20 at the highest. We'll be picking thick, which gives us high starting physical stats, but low agility. Don't worry though, I have a plan.

Next we choose two meaningless choices. Complexion is skin color and hair color speaks for itself. We're going light and black because who cares?

Now comes out gift. The game is a little misleading about this if I recall, when you select any of the primary stats is claims you'll begin the game with an extra +5 and that's true. What the game doesn't tell you is that you also gain a bonus to raising that stat permanently. Pretty nifty. We'll be picking speed. By choosing speed we get what I've found to be the best starting chassis in the game. Thick with the speed bonus gives you 20 in every stat that matters and brings your starting speed to 15. We'll want to get the speed to 20, but I'll explain more about that and stats in general when we get into the game proper.As an aside, I do not know how big Big Cock makes your cock.

Now we have our previous career. Let me just say I have no fucking clue what most of these do. The one we want is fighting, because it gives a flat percentage bonus to all damage which is good to me. Religion is also a good choice if you want to go for a truly pure warrior, but because Fenexo is a coward bitch, we'd ascribe to some kind of eastern religion of peace and harmony and not a religion that worships God (and I mean the Christian God) so we'll opt for the increase to fire power.I just noticed for the first time (and no, I'm not kidding, as I was writing this I actually noticed this and I've been playing this game for years now) there's a choice for Slutting and Whoring. Uhh, okay then. Sick.

Okay, now we're into the game. Lots of gay ass words no one in their right mind should give a fuck about. We got punted into the portal and ended up in Teth'ala or wherever and some demons chat us up or something I think. I think we get ambushed the second we pop out or something. Gee, thanks chief, I'm glad no one thought to make sure we'd be safe. I guess we are the yearly snackrifice but geez, they could try to fake it a little.

Okay, when we hit next our stats change. Specifically we accrue some lust and gain 2 onto our corruption track. I'll discuss both of those and our stats next, but I just wanted to point out that every time our stats change it'll be marked by a green up arrow or a red down arrow. It doesn't tell you how much you gained, however, which is annoying.

So, anyway the story so far is that we ended up in the portal and some dude chats us up and then we smack him around or something and he fucks off, leaving us with a heaping helping of Lust and some corruption and we're loitering right outside the portal. By the way, the flavor text here is pointless. It'll change over the course of the game as we become more powerful, but nothing it mentions will ever be relevant, even if we "fortify and construct traps". Also we have no idea what we're expected to do. Gee, thanks shit heads. I guess that's part of being a sacrifice but whatever.I think the world we were kicked into is called uhhh, Melandre? Melender? Something with an M. Basically it's a world existing in a pocket dimension I think and not actually hell. It's kind of confusing that there's a giant spooky ass portal next to our podunk little down that just leads to the next dimension, and I don't know why they send sacrifices through it. Oh yeah, I think the place is called Mareth by the way, which is named for the patron god here, who we'll be running into eventually. So anyway, Mareth kind of sucks ass as we will see and is dying because the demons are ripping it apart. Why we of all people are its savior, I have no idea and the games story (as much as I can understand it) makes no sense and No I Will Not Read The Intro so fuck off.

Okay, so here's the game's basic UI. Some options on the bottom are gone due to our lack of current resources and knowledge of the area. I'll talk more about our choices later, but first I figure I should attempt to explain everything on the sidebar before we move on.

Okay, on the left we have our core stats. As the button on the top of the UI would hint at, there are secondary stats, which I will talk about later, but for now don't worry about them. The first four stats are what I call "combat stats" and the only important stats our character has.First up we have strength, arguably the most important stat in the game. Strength determines your damage and unlocks certain damage related traits. I don't know exactly how damage is calculated, but basically your strength and the power of your weapon determine your damage and the more strength the better. Strength also seems linked to your ability to escape certain debilitation enemies place on you. Strength is hard to train up but there's a way to pump the stat up, making it quite easy to raise.Toughness is the third most important stat and very easy to increase. Toughness increases your HP, with 1 point equal to 1 point of HP. It also unlocks several useful traits, mostly linked around negating damage and increasing your HP. As I mentioned previously, toughness is really easy to increase and I'll demonstrate why later. While HP is important, the easy at which it takes to get more makes this a relatively less important stat the strength or speed. Speaking of which...Speed. Speed speed speed. Speed is a very good stat, second most important and the hardest to train in the game. Speed does a hell of a lot-it determines your chance to hit, your chance to dodge, your ability to evade or escape certain attacks and also determines your chance to escape from combat entirely. A whole lot revolves around speed and that's why we chose it as out gift. If we hadn't, we'd have started with 10 and that's just abysmal. Other chassis' give higher starting speed, but at the expense of lower strength. We'll need the 20 strength now, because we can get our speed up a lot faster in the early game.Next with have intelligence. Intelligence is the last "combat" stat in the game and by far the least important. Intelligence unlocks some useful perks, but beyond that it only has two "in game" purposes. The first is it'll increase the amount of damage we'll do with magic. Yes, this game has magic and most of it is markedly terrible. Second, it effects exactly one conversation tree in the entire game. No I'm not joking. ANd when you see which conversation it effects it's even stupider. You raise is by exploring and by the time we're done grinding we'll already be a Megamind Starring Jim Carey (wasn't he the star of that movie? That blue dude looked like him).The next two stats are Libido and Sensitivity. I do not know what these do. These are "sex" stats. Libido seems to passively make you gain Lust which is bad and uhhhh...It gives sex perks I guess?Sensitivity is linked to how sensitive your genitals are. It goes down by jerking off (as you can see in the bottom right that's an actual game mechanic) and I think it has, uh. Ahem. I don't know what it does, there I've said it.Next we have Corruption. Corruption is your alignment, basically. Sometimes it's a representation of your alignment and sometimes it's a physical matter that exists in the world. Corruption is rarely consistent. Sometimes you gain Corruption for having consensual sex with a bad person, but you don't gain any for sexually assaulting someone else. Sometimes you get it for an act (such as removing a monsters futa dick) and other times...you don't! Rule of thumb is that you should never eat anything that's not obviously clean and don't touch or do anything unless it's killing.Finally we have HP and Lust. HP is exactly what you'd expect. Lust, however, is sort of interesting. It's a second life bar and it's a measure of our current horny levels. If it reaches 100 outside of combat we cannot control our horny levels and must jack off or have sex. If we reach 100 in combat, we're toast. There are ways to gain lust resistance but we will always have 100. I find this to be a slightly interesting mechanic as a retard with lots of HP can still be knocked out if they're a fuck machine. We don't have to worry about this though.

Finally Day measure how long we've been at it, time is the current time of day. We must cease all actives by 21:00 because reasons. We can still whack our bag but we can't explore or do anything else past 21:00. Other then that, those times are meaningless.Next update I'll explain the different commands we have and we'll begin the process to get the best weapon in the game. Feel free to ask any questions. Troll will be killed.