While ABC unloads a whopping 12 new shows from its shopping cart, CBS has opened its upfronts season with just two major buys so far: Person of Interest, a thriller exec-produced by J.J. Abrams (Lost/Fringe) and penned by Jonathan Nolan (The Dark Knight), and Broke Girls, a multi-camera sitcom from Michael Patrick King (Sex and the City) and comedienne Whitney Cummings.

Person of Interest is a crime drama centered on an ex-CIA agent played by James Caviezel (The Prisoner). Presumed dead, he teams up with a mysterious billionaire (Lost‘s Michael Emerson) to prevent violent crimes in New York City. Taraji P. Henson (Boston Legal) and Kevin Chapman (Mystic River) also star.

I want to know why a JJ Abrams show is on CBS. Did Abrams somehow produce a tedious procedural? Starring Michael Emerson?? That would quite possibly be the weirdest Abrams show ever. LOL. But seriously, is this show a procedural? Because that would make me very sad for Michael Emerson.