"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality, nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit." ~ Christopher McCandlessBecause it's the month of LOVE, let's take a moment to see how much and how well you are loving yourself.

So let me ask you: what do you really, really want for your life?

Make a list of everything you want to have/do/be in the near or distant future--whether it's better health, a new job, better pay, a new marriage, more confidence, more peace, more love, a new home, or a trip to a new state.

Now, how close are you right now, today, to what you really, really want? Is the gap between the two lists extreme, or are you closer to your dream life than you think?

The gap between present-day and your future is where you are being challenged to change, to grow, and to risk your unhappy or "safe" situation, and go for what you really want.

Let's say you're already on an exercise program and you'll soon be fitting into your summer clothes, something you've been wanting for a long time. The difference between where you are today and where you hope to be by summer is attainable without much more effort.

But remember, the start of your goal may have looked daunting. The desire to lose weight by summer may have challenged you to change some habits and confront some limiting thinking, and despite those challenges, you persevered, and you made it!

But what if you're in an unhealthy marriage with a partner who has no desire to work on the relationship, and you really, really want an emotionally healthy and mutually fulfilling marriage?

The difference between what you have today and where you want to be in the future is huge. That difference is where you are being called upon to begin taking steps toward your new future.

Will it be uncomfortable to confront your complacency, or scary to have a serious discussion with your mate to get what you really, really want in your marriage?

You can count on it.

But how uncomfortable, sad, or unsatisfying will it be for you to stay in a situation that feels "safe," settling for much less than you want, then missing the chance to get something so much better?

Loving yourself means taking risks on your own behalf; it means stepping into the person you are destined to be instead of the person you pretend to be; and it means allowing yourself to receive what you really, really want.

Loving yourself IS the gap between your two lists.

Are you ready to start changing something today so that your life begins to resemble your future dream life?

Author

After being raised in the mid-west, I migrated south for high school (with a year in Brazil) and college, and ventured west for a long marriage (and later, divorce)...and eventually landed in the northwest--my real home. Sigh.