Living in a Bipolar World
with Mark Vorzimmer and you and you and...
By Mark Vorzimmer
web posted October 28, 2002
You're bipolar and you probably don't even know it. That's
right...I'm bipolar and so are you. I'd watched the TV ad so
many times that I finally decided to go online at
http://www.bipolarawareness.com/ to take the web quiz and
learn my condition. I was shocked to learn that I was
bipolar...that is...until I learned that my immediate family was
bipolar, my relatives were bipolar, people that reminded me of
my relatives were bipolar, and so are you.
Take the "Mood Disorder Questionnaire" and verify for yourself:
1. Has there ever been a period of time when you were not your
usual self and ...
...you felt so good or so hyper that other people thought you
were not your normal self or you were so hyper that you got into
trouble?
...you were so irritable that you shouted at people or started
fights or arguments?
...you felt much more self-confident than usual?
...you got much less sleep than usual and found you didn't really
miss it?
...you were much more talkative or spoke much faster than
usual?
...thoughts raced through your head or you couldn't slow your
mind down?
...you were so easily distracted by things around you that you
had trouble concentrating or staying on track?
...you had much more energy than usual?
...you were much more active or did many more things than
usual?
...you were much more social or outgoing than usual, for
example, you telephoned friends in the middle of the night?
...you were much more interested in sex than usual?
...you did things that were unusual for you or that other people
might have thought were excessive, foolish, or risky?
...spending money got you or your family into trouble?
2. If you checked YES to more than one of the above...
Guess what...you're a bipolar just like I said!
Don't get me wrong, I was glad to know that I was in good
company, until it occurred to me that the two DC-area snipers
are also probably bipolar (Oops...I just spilled the defense
strategy!). John Hinkley Jr., Mark David Chapman, Jeffry
Dahmer, and Travis Bickle were all also bipolars. ...I was so
hoping it would be an exclusive affliction like anorexia where I
would be beautiful and spoiled and get to go to the bathroom all
the time.
Now what do I have to look forward to...exclusive clinics? No;
everyone's there...or not, as the case may be. Special parking
privileges? No! Federal assistance. No again. A special
medical bracelet? You should have seen the look on the
pharmacy girl's face! No, I get to keep a "mood diary"...so say's
my "webMD." I think I'll start looking for something else. Wait
a minute...here's something interesting "How to become a
Muslim."
I'll be someone important someday, or maybe I'm just talkin' out
my other side.
Mark Vorzimmer is an occasional contributor to Enter Stage
Right.
Enter Stage Right - http://www.enterstageright.com