This time last week I received a phone call from the Daily Telegraph telling me a photographer was on their way to my house to shoot me for an article they were running on sleep the following day.

Then this morning, I was interviewed by a National news network on the radio discussing the same article.

I have also just sent off final negotiations to host an INCREDIBLE wellness event as their MC for two days in October.

Opportunity after opportunity after opportunity has been knocking at my door, and it is crazy to think that 8 days ago, NONE of these things were on my radar – not even thoughts in the back of my mind.

Now, I’m not sharing this to brag. I’m also not sharing this in the hopes of anyone else feeling inadequate.

But I think it is incredibly important to shed light on this amazing domino effect in my life recently that, yes, I have created. And worked bloody hard at.

Too often, as an outsider, we can view other people’s successes as ‘luck’. You all know the ‘overnight success stories’ that take, on average, 7years of behind the scenes work to achieve.

There is NOTHING lucky about what has happened for me over the last 7 days. All of it has been created BY me, and I want to share this with you all because you can do it too. You truly can. There is nothing that makes me any more worthy of success – be it in my career, my business life, my financial status, my relationships – ANYTHING. But you have to see that, recognise it and own it.

OWN YOUR WORTH. IT IS ONLY THEN THAT YOU WILL TRULY SUCCEED.

And don’t get me wrong, I don’t have this all figured out. FAR from it. In fact, these shifts have only recently taken place after MONTHS and months of investing in my own personal development. You guys don’t really see what takes place behind the scenes when it comes to how hard I work on myself and my business. For me, it never ever stops. But it is VITAL if you truly want to reap life’s rewards. You cannot sit back and wait for luck to land in your lap. It doesn’t happen that way. There is no quick fix or button to push. Which is why it is easier to just give up and become a spectator in your own life, living for holidays or weekends or the ‘gaps’ between actually living. But you are different. You know there is another way. I know you know this, because you have read this far.

So, how did I make these shifts, and how can you follow suit?

Journalling

A daily non-negotiable of mine, and the second part of my morning ritual after meditating. My journalling practice is a non-negotiable. What started as a way for me to clear my head at the beginning of the day has transformed into connecting with my inner most desires and the workings of my soul. Writing things down really clarifies what is fear based and fuelled by ego, and then what is more love and soul. When you can determine what motivator is running the show (love or fear) – then you can make some incredibly powerful changes.

My journalling has told me when to slow down, when to pull my finger out and do the work, and when to stop with the excuses. The lessons aren’t always flowy and loving – there are some harsh truths in there. But as Elizabeth Gilbert says, she has never seen a powerful transformation in a person that hasn’t started with the person in question getting sick of their own bullshit.

That is what journalling does for me. Calls out my fear and slaps me right across the face with what to do next. It is so much more than just a pretty book with nice words.

Channelling

I have some incredibly connected and inspiring friends, and I will spend time on Voxer channeling my feelings with them. Voxer is a wonderful app, as it allows you to communicate with someone without the interruption of talking over one another. I use this as a tool with two of my best friends almost every day – sometimes we can speak for up to 15 minute recordings at a time, because when you allow your mind to flow and the words to spill out, you can really get on a roll and answer questions you didn’t realise you always had within you.

I love to channel while walking in nature. I will stick my headphones in and just talk about how I am feeling. What came up in my journalling that morning? Where am I feeling stuck? What old stories do I want to change about myself? There have been times where we will end up in tears, but just as often in awe of what answers we always had inside us. It is the magic of allowing the space for the knowledge to come. Just being and trusting that you truly KNOW what it is you need to do in any given moment. Because you do. I see it with my clients all the time.

Alongside channeling Voxers, we also share our gratitudes for the day, and also where we need to hold each other to account. Just talking things out with someone on the same page as you can see incredible transformational shifts (hell, it’s why coaching works so well!)

We always have the answers in us – it is creating the space for these magic realisations that matters.

Energy Work

I regularly see my Body Talk practitioner (and friend Ava) to recalibrate my energy, emotions and physical symptoms, to shift outdated modes of thinking and realign, ground and centre my energy. Body Talk is very similar to kinesiology and has helped me immensely from physical ailments like acne and gut health, to deep-seated emotional challenges and blocks.

I usually see Ava every three weeks or so, however in August my soul was craving more, and I was seeing her weekly for about 5 weeks. Yes, this costs me money, and yes, it can be incredibly challenging to sit and stare at the truth behind some of my blockages, but I care far more about my own personal growth and development than I do anything else. If you can’t invest money in your own health and wellbeing, what the hell is the point of anything, really? Because, #truthbomb, without your health, you have nothing. Simple as that.

The shifts that have been made in my recent sessions have lead me to the point I am at now, where opportunities are knocking at my door, strangers are recognising me in shopping centres (legit a thing now, and so incredibly cool) and people and brands are practically throwing money to work with me. (SO GRATEFUL!)

It hasn’t always been this way and I have had to work SERIOUSLY hard on releasing so many blockages and beliefs around abundance, money, wealth, self worth, shining my full light, being ‘enough’, self sabotage, not wanting to show up. SO MUCH FEAR. It rears its head for me every damn day. But in shifting the energy with a healer, you are able to move through the discomfort, take on the lessons and grow from there.

It is NO coincidence that the themes of my most recent sessions have been to step out and be seen, allow myself to be successful and to stop hiding in the shadows of others.

Follow Your Bliss

This one is simple. Do the stuff that makes you happy and brings you joy. Laugh as often as you can. Follow the high-vibrational energy feels and guess what? That is what you will experience in your life. Pursue opportunities and watch them pursue you. Get out of your comfort zone, and watch people applaud you. Follow your heart rather than your head and watch life unfold perfectly, like a scripted movie. Even BETTER than a movie, because you are actually living it.

This absolutely works in reverse too. If you are working long hours in a job you hate, I bet you aren’t feeling too crash hot, are you? Your health may be suffering, and maybe your relationship? This domino effect can work either way – like attracts like, remember – and everything we think, say and do is energy. This is science. And it is so bloody simple, yet I see time and time again people falling trap into their own low vibrational mindset, wondering why stuff isn’t working out for them.

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting a different result.

Stop doing stuff that makes you feel like crap. Just stop. Follow your heart – even when it scares you, especially when the resistance is there. Watch the magic unfold for you when you do.

Creating Space

If you are the type of person who jumps from outing to outing, event to work to brunch to night out to second job to other thing – without a space in between for yourself – then sorry to break it to you, but you are really acting as your own worst enemy. You are repelling opportunity by filling your life with ‘stuff’.

In running from free time, rest, relaxation and ‘me time’ – you are also running from the natural flow and surrender that is needed for life to happen FOR you.

By creating conscious space in your daily life (this isn’t only about a free Sunday every few weeks, but about rest and space every single day) – then you are allowing yourself to receive. Because you have given yourself the energetic space to receive! It is as simple as that.

I didn’t have to force or strive or push for ANY of the three major opportunities that landed in my lap this week. THEY CAME TO ME. And I truly believe it was a result of the collective things I did above.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Do you believe in luck? Or are you creating your own reality? Share with me in the comments.

Do you smile to yourself? Call yourself beautiful? Or quickly glance away in disgust?

If the latter is more your jam, you are not alone. I have spoken with hundreds of women who do the same. When it comes to facing themselves in the mirror, it is unbearable. The thought of speaking kindly about themselves and their body isn’t even on the radar.

I get it. I’ve been there.

But I have also come out of the other end – a much happier, healthier, calmer and kinder person for it, too.

And I KNOW you want to get there. You wouldn’t have read this far otherwise. But it all seems too hard doesn’t it? When we have grown up in a society conditioning us to de-value our worth, or better yet, market that we are ‘worth it’ – the ‘it’ being makeup, or clothing, or those stupid waist trainers and leggings that “make you appear 3 sizes smaller!”

Get fucked.

The real question here is WHY. As in, why do we WANT to look three sizes smaller? Why do we WANT to train our waist to contort into a shape that isn’t natural for our given body? Why do we WANT to lose those 10 kilos?

What are we trying to prove here?

Now don’t get me wrong, I am ALL for exercise and eating well and living a healthy life because of how it FEELS. Health feels great. Living an energised, vibrant and healthy life is the ultimate goal right? We want to wake up feeling good, going about our day without illness, or panic or any level of mental or physical illness.

The real issue I am seeing though, is the ‘health’ industry pushing not so healthy ways of living. Weighing your food before you eat it is not healthy for your mind. Training every day without rest is not healthy for your body. Weighing yourself once, twice, or more a day (or week) is not healthy for your soul.

And yet we think that if we change the shape of our body, if we lose those last 5 kilos, if we LOOK a different way, then we will FEEL a different way.

Here’s a truth bomb for you my loves – the way we LOOK and the way we FEEL are not one and the same. They are TWO ENTIRELY DIFFERENT THINGS.

Take it from the girl who has had the abs, the thigh gap, lost the weight, had ALL the compliments in the world about how amazing my body was looking, and was left feeling depleted, fatigued, anxious and a total wreck.

Now I have to reiterate – for some people, strict regimented dieting, and training, does not have the same effect on them as it did on me. But this blog IS about me, and it would be wrong of me to not share it.

This week is Love Your Body Week in Australia. In light of this, I wanted to share with you my three top tips to starting to love what you see when you look in the mirror starting NOW – and not when things physically change. (Hot tip: when you start practicing self love, you will find you body relaxes and changes ANYWAY. But you aren’t left with the mental, physical and emotional exhaustion. It’s a freaking win-win!)

Say goodbye to your scales

I don’t weigh myself because I know what that number does to my mind. For some of you, maybe weighing yourself is fine and you aren’t ever attached to the number that shows up, in which case, amazing. But I know for me, I used to place a whole lot of importance on that number. I could have had the #cleanest, #fittest week of my life, but if that little number came back even a FRACTION bigger than the last time I saw it (most likely the day before) then it would send me into overdrive – I wasn’t doing enough, all my hard work was for nothing, I must have looked bigger, blah blah blah.

When I realised the scales were not helping me in any way, I decided I would never weigh myself again. And other than a few doctors visits (where I have told them not to tell me the number) I haven’t. Because I KNOW even after all the work I have done, hearing that number will never do my self worth any favours. I know my mind. And you know yours. Do what is best for it.

(You will KNOW if you are at a healthy weight range by how your clothes fit, how your body FEELS and how often you are exercising/eating well. Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to know the pull of your body’s gravitational force to be able to tell if you are healthy or not.)

Start catching your inner dialogue when you look at yourself in the mirror

Next time you look at yourself in the mirror, catch out where your mind goes. What are the stories you are telling yourself about your physical appearance?

Here’s one for you – I used to HATE my legs. I thought they should have been longer, and didn’t like how muscly they were. I would look in the mirror and pinch at my thighs wishing they were smaller. Now, I know that this belief had NOTHING to do with how my legs looked (totally love them now by the way). The story I was telling myself – that my legs were too big – was actually a DEEPER issue about my self worth.

I believed I wasn’t good enough. I wasn’t as skinny as some of my friends, so that meant I wasn’t attractive enough. I thought my difference made me unloveable, unlikeable – that boys wouldn’t find me attractive, that in some way the circumference of my legs was a direct correlation to my ability to succeed in life.

Notice what you say when you look in the mirror and then unpick the dialogue. Chances are it is about so much more than your physical appearance. What are your underlying stories, and are they actually true?

Acknowledge the FEELING you are seeking – and then go out and find it NOW!

Close your eyes and imagine you are physically looking however you want to right now. Perhaps you weigh your ‘goal weight’ or just look the way you have always wanted to… Now really imagine how that FEELS. What would you do differently in your life if you looked that way?

Maybe you feel more confident? Sexy? Worthy?

Whatever feelings you are seeking, realise you can feel ANY of these things RIGHT NOW. You don’t have to wait for the perfect body, or to change your looks to feel these things. These feelings come down to practices of self love and personal development – which have nothing to do with our physicality, other than nurturing and honouring and loving the bodies we are given.

When I was training my hardest, weighed my goal weight, had the abs and thigh gap, I was seeking freedom and passion and inspiration. I was sick of working a job that no longer lit me up, but rather than change that, I thought changing my body would make all the difference. It only made things worse. I was sicker and unhappier than ever before.

Really acknowledge WHY you think changing your body will change your life. Chances are there is an underlying issue you are struggling to cope with, and you are using your body as an excuse. Own up to it, and get to work angel.

I would love to hear what practices have helped you fall in love with your body? Please share them with me in the comments below, and let’s start a body-love thread of inspiration!

Now, recognising this in itself is an amazing feat. As someone who has struggled with anxiety since I was six, it has taken me upward of 20 years to learn how to read these warning signs in my body alerting me to an impending ‘danger’ created by my mind, and my mind alone.

That doesn’t make an anxious onset any simpler to manage though. Once it arrives, the only thing you can really do is ride it. Lucky I have a tool kit of ways to manage an anxious spiral – and part of that is acknowledging it for what it is.

Yep, I still get anxious from time to time. But moments that used to leave me in a panicked state, hyperventilating and gasping for air, rushed to emergency in the most extreme moments (three times to be exact) because I was convinced my throat was closing up, or I was dying, are now few and far between.

My last panic attack was February 2016. 18 months ago.

For those of you who have experienced anxiety (or universe forbid, a panic disorder) you know how exciting a feeling it is when the gaps between your last episode get longer and longer.

Now don’t get me wrong, this has been years and years in the works. My rock bottom in 2015 saw me having panic attacks weekly, if not daily. This whole way of living without panic is relatively new for me in the scheme of things, and something I continue to work on.

So today, when that familiar feeling rose in my chest, sinking my stomach, blurring my vision and making me want to run scared – here is what I did instead…

Sat with it

I really noticed it rising as I was driving – I guess because your mind can really settle here. I noticed the chest breathing, the sick tummy feeling, my mind with a million tabs open, and almost laughed to myself “hello anxiety”. One of the easiest ways to diffuse feelings of anxiety is to NOT resist it. Because a lot of the time feeling anxious can make us feel MORE anxious – why is this happening, what if I stop breathing, what if this becomes a panic attack, should I pull over, but I have been doing so well, why now?

You guys know what I mean. Instead, I acknowledged it for what it was. My body perceived I was in danger because of the way I had been behaving over the last week or maybe even month. Fight or flight response is our bodies way of PROTECTING us. So I thanked my body for doing this, but also reminded it – aloud – that all was okay.

I repeated the following affirmation until I really FELT it: I am safe. I am relaxed. I let life flow effortlessly.

Focused on my breathing

Then, I directed my attention straight to my breathing. The only way to get our bodies instantly out of fight or flight mode, is to elongate our exhale breath. DON’T UNDERESTIMATE THIS STEP.

Here’s why it works:

Back when we were cavemen, fight or flight mode would switch on when we needed to get ourselves out of danger and to safety – you have all heard the sabre-tooth tiger analogy yeah?

A few physical changes need to take place to get our bodies to safety – and quickly!

One of the first things that happens, is our breathing shallows to our chest.

Why?

Because when we are running from danger, we don’t have the time to take deep inhale belly breaths do we?

This is why, when we feel anxious or nervous, you might find yourself yawning or sighing or finding it hard to catch your breath. It is because our bodies think they are doing the right thing by us.

The thing is, today we are engaging fight or flight like never before – and this can have detrimental effects including sore chests, feeling like you are going to pass out, hyperventilation and even false sense of heart attacks.

Makes sense right? Because we aren’t often in a life or death situation when anxiety sets on.

Which is why, the easiest way to remind our body it is safe, is to breathe deeply into your belly, and exhale for as long as you possibly can. Do this until the shallow breathing subsides – you have told your body it is safe. You can’t run from danger and belly breathe at the same time. (Another reason to make meditation and/or yoga a daily practice!)

Acknowledged WHY I was feeling this way

I started to curiously question where my anxious onset stemmed from. But this is important – it wasn’t in a worried or judgemental way. More like a curiosity – hmmm, I wonder why my body thinks it is in danger?

This was easy for me to pinpoint – with Lola going into surgery on Tuesday, I knew my adrenaline levels were peaking, and truth be told probably hadn’t done enough to level them out again once her surgery was over. So my adrenals were fired up and ready to POP because I was pushing through the last few days, not taking too much solid rest time for myself.

In acknowledging the WHY, I was able to reiterate to myself there was actually nothing to be worried about, that everything was okay (as it always is) and that there was nothing my body needed to protect me from.

Spoke to someone (a few people actually) about it

I am lucky to be surrounded by amazing friends and family who ‘get’ what anxiety is like, and how it can flare up out of nowhere. The worst thing we can do as anxious folk is keep it all to ourselves. Sometimes – scrap that, all the time – the best thing is to just admit how we are feeling, and talk it out with someone.

I spoke to my Dad (who has had his own battle with anxiety and is a wealth of knowledge and understanding), one of my besties and my partner.

It’s nice to have people who hold space for you – who let you speak, and know not to say ‘Just don’t worry’ (never tell an anxious person not to worry). Find your key people and have them on speed dial the next time an anxious flare up arises (because it most likely will).

Actually – on that. If you have anxiety, it is highly likely that no matter WHAT you try, you will feel more anxious than usual at times. That is not to say you will always have panic attacks. But it is also just a simple reminder that too often we set ourselves up for failure in thinking this will go away forever.

Rather than thinking in this way, start to learn how best to manage your anxiety so that your moments between episodes get longer and longer. That way, the next time an anxious spiral does arise, you are prepared rather than shocked.

Took the afternoon off to rest

I got home from my full day, with a bunch of items on my to do list (including writing this which is meant to be sent tomorrow morning) and ignored them all.

I put on my trackies, took off my bra, cancelled my evening appointment, and dived under the covers and slept for 2 hours. Fight or flight is super taxing on our bodies and we must do all we can to recalibrate when we notice we are operating from an anxious state. It tells our adrenals not to worry.

Once I finish writing this, it will be bath time with my lavender oil, and some trashy TV (although is the Bachelor REALLY trashy? #amIright?)

Cried

Fuck I love a good cry. All of that pent up energy and anxiety has to be released guys – in holding onto it, we set ourselves up for a lovely panic attack – which I know we don’t want. Just let it out, there doesn’t need to be a reason why. I cried for a good couple of minutes, and that was all I needed. I know the me tomorrow will thank me for it, when I wake up feeling more energised and less anxious.

Wrote this

There is a real power in putting words to the page. Never underestimate writing as therapy – it is why us wellness folk swear by our journaling. When we write, we are literally pouring the words and thoughts and worries from our minds, out onto the pages – leaving behind a much clearer mental state than before. Then, we can work on filling our mind back up with beliefs and thoughts that truly serve us – this is where gratitudes and affirmations come to play. You cannot be anxious and grateful at the same time. Empty out those worried minds and replace your thoughts with positivity.

It isn’t a secret how obsessed I am with sleep. When I hit rock bottom in 2015, sleep was the bane of my existence. I was walking around like a zombie, in the crux of a horrible adrenal fatigue, and even though I could feel the tiredness seeping into my limbs (preventing me from training – even yoga or walking was too hard for me) – I just couldn’t get enough sleep.

I would lie awake in bed feeling physically EXHAUSTED counting down the hours it would take me to drift off. And when I finally WAS asleep, it was one of those awful half-awake ones where it felt like I was back awake every hour. I could be lying in bed for 10 hours and get only a couple of hours of real sleep. No wonder I felt like I’d been hit my a bus on waking every day.

During that phase of my life, I weighed everything I ate, avoided gluten and dairy and sugar like the bloody plague, and exercised multiple times a day. I thought I was the epitome of health and yet my health came crashing down from underneath me. Oh the irony.

A big factor in this crumbling of my wellbeing?

Lack of sufficient sleep.

Which is why today I preach more about getting sufficient sleep than I do about exercise and eating well.

Because here’s the thing – we KNOW how to exercise. We also know how to eat healthily. But do we really know how to get sufficient sleep?

My time in practice, coaching hundreds of women in learning how to live their happiest and healthiest lives, tells me we have a LONG way to go when it comes to managing our sleep the same way we manage our health by other means.

And yet phrases like “I’ll sleep when I’m dead” perpetuate the notion that sleep is for the weak. Actually, it is the opposite – you cannot be strong, physically, mentally or emotionally, without sufficient sleep.

I harp on all about the key facts of sleep here, if you are interested. Like how, we should be aiming for between 7-9 hours of UNINTERRUPTED sleep per night. It should take us 15 minutes to fall asleep at night.

If, like mine were, your eyes are popping out of your head in the realisation your sleep is not at all ‘healthy’ – don’t worry. Below are my top tips for managing your healthiest, best sleep ever. Stick to these tips for the next 30 nights and I guarantee you, you will be sleeping like a boss in no time (take it from the girl who has 9 hours uninterrupted a night – unless there’s a full moon, obviously!)

MAKE FRIENDS WITH MELATONIN

Melatonin is our sleep hormone. In cave man times, when the sun went down, our melatonin levels would rise, telling our bodies it was time for sleep. We would wake with the sun, which would decrease our melatonin levels.

Melatonin MATTERS when it comes to sleep, and is totally determined by LIGHT.

This is why it is so important to be in dim lighting at least an hour before bed time. We forget this, and spend time in bright lights, with back lit devices all the way up to shut eye, and wonder why we can’t switch off and drift to sleep. Because our poor melatonin levels are confused – they think it’s still day time!

Make the effort to transition to dim lighting an hour before bed – be it light dimmers, lamps or candles, and notice the impact this makes as you physically wind down before bed.

Additionally, in the morning, switch on ALL the lights and get yourself in brightness as much as possible! Bye-bye melatonin, hello morning burst of energy!

(Sleep-pro tip: Those people going for walks in the dark before bed? Not actually crazy – they are getting their melatonin hit right before sleep!)

MAGNESIUM OIL – THE GAME CHANGER

As much as I know all about sleep, there are times when I need an extra push. Enter, magnesium oil. When I was in the holds of my fatigue, I took magnesium supplements to aid my sleep, which really helped me at the time. What I didn’t know, is you can actually use a body OIL that has the exact same effect! SO easy and damn effective!

Introducing SALT LAB. These guys have been a huge game changer for me recently, especially as my heightened adrenaline levels lately have lead to longer time than desired falling asleep.

What I didn’t know is our bodies only absorb 20-50% of oral supplements, and the additional stress this puts on our digestive system and organs is unnecessary when there is a body OIL available that works even more effectively! Our bodies are able to self regulate and absorb what is needed when using an oil, putting no additional stress on our organs and digestive system. PLUS, because the oil is is absorbed through our skin, it travels straight into our blood cells – talk about a quick hit!

After only 3 days of using this spray, my sleep was back to normal. Now I don’t go a night without it. Just spray on your belly – it is literally that simple! (If it tingles it means you may be deficient in magnesium, and can add it to a carrier oil like coconut oil.) You can read all about the effects of magnesium and sleep here: but just know, it has totally worked for me (and Trent too!)

(For your chance to win one of two SALT LAB sprays, jump on my Instagram page stat and check out the most recent post!)

TEMPERATURE MATTERS

There is a reason I am such a fan of baths before bed! Not only are they bloody relaxing, helping you to wind down and get into a relaxed state before dozing off, but the drop in body temperature when you hop out of a hot bath (or shower) signals to your body that it is sleep time.

This is also why some of us like sleeping with the fan on in summer, but a doona over our bodies. We KNOW intrinsically what the right body temperature is for sleep – too hot or too cold and it just won’t cut it. Aim for around 18 degrees.

SO LONG SCROLLING

I hate to be the bearer of bad news guys, but for a good night’s sleep you really need to get rid of your phones. And laptops. Even your Kindles. Back lit devices totally mess with our melatonin and also, we aren’t allowing our minds to really wind down. If you do everything else, but still scroll, and you have trouble with your sleep – it is time for the phone to go.

Try what I do – stick your phone on flight mode an hour before bed time and dim the lighting right down. That way even if you are tempted to check your phone, you won’t be distracted by anything! Switch up your phone for reading (using a warm lamp by your bedside), or writing down everything you are grateful for that day. We are all after more time in our day – so use this hour for YOU and make it pampering and productive.

LAVENDER OIL ON EVERYTHING

Yes Hollie, I hear you think, we know you love essential oils. Well it’s true, I do. And one of my favourites is Lavender because of its calming properties – not just for anxiety and stress, but for sleep too. We diffuse lavender every night before bed (and while we sleep) as well as two drops on our pillow cases. We travel with it. My partner is the most masculine guy you will come across and whinges like crazy when we run out of lavender oil.

My bestie who was a bit cynical about this whole oils ‘thing’ started using lavender oil when I found out she never dreamed. This told me she most likely wasn’t getting the deep REM stage of sleep needed for full body rest and restoration. Her first night diffusing lavender and guess what? She had a dream. And sleep hasn’t been an issue of her’s since.

Want to know where to get the best quality lavender oil for your sleep? Send me a message and I will send you a sample!

Truth be told, I do a whole lot more in setting myself up for epic sleep – these just scrape the top of the barrel. If you are keen to learn more, I HIGHLY recommend reading Arianna Huffington’s SLEEP REVOLUTION (#girlcrush) – or just watch this space, as I plan my next ebook on all things SLEEP!

Well hello there! Fancy seeing me posting on a Tuesday!
I hope you don’t mind me showing up unexpectedly, but I am FULL of the excitement today!
Why?Because IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!
Yep, I am still unashamedly excited every time another year ticks by on the calendar – I just LOVE birthdays. Not just mine – my partner’s, my family members, my friends. Birthdays are a time to practice gratitude for gracing the earth for another beautiful year of memories, and reflect on the growth that has occurred. Ageing to me is EXCITING! Another year of growth, and wisdom and memories? BRING IT!
So today, to celebrate my birthday with all of you, I wanted to share 28 little lessons I have learned in the past 28 years of my life.

I ALSO want to offer all of you a special birthday prezzy from me at the end of the blog post – because you guys deserve to celebrate too right?!28 LITTLE LIFE LESSONS IN 28 YEARS

Life is short – don’t waste it working a job you hate

Find what makes your heart sing and what you would gladly do for free – THAT is your passion and true calling

If you don’t like the gym, quit it. Stop wasting money on a membership and find exercise you truly enjoy

Naturopathy will change your health for the better in every way – find a good one. Heck, see MY naturopath

Going to events that interest you on your own doesn’t make you a loser – it makes you the coolest person in the room (and also allows you to attract likeminded cool people!)

Your friendship circle will change over time – but your soul sisters will stay forever

It is better to have a small circle of intimate friendships than spreading yourself thin over multiple draining friendships

LOVE is the answer. Always. Make it your intention every single day

Random acts of kindness are totally underrated and the easiest way to make you feel better about yourself

Gratitude prevents anxiety. Commit to it daily

Vulnerability is powerful. People don’t want to hear that everything is always sunshine and rainbows – they want to RELATE to you, and sometimes that means not having your shit together – and that is okay

Make space in your week for nothingness. This is where the magic happens

Oracle cards, meditation, affirmation work and feeling connected to a ‘source’ – be it God, the Universe or whatever else you believe in – is KEY to optimal wellbeing

Nothing beats travel. Stop saving for a mortgage and book a flight to a place you’ve never been before

There is more to life than settling down with a house – unless that is your ultimate goal. But if you are just doing it because everyone else is, think twice

Writing is the best therapy you can gift yourself – and it’s free!

I would love to hear your little life lessons – what have you learned over the span of your life?MY GIFT FOR YOU

Because birthdays are ALL about generosity, I would love to gift you all, for the next 24 HOURS ONLY, 28% off your next (full price) session booked with me.So that means $42 OFF! I have never done this before but birthdays are to be celebrated for all of us right?

Truth be told, I’m not much of a rule breaker. In school, I never got a detention. Not one. The most rebellious thing I ever did was creep out to the graveyard at Year 12 camp, and even then I felt guilty for days after. My nickname in primary school was goody-goody. I played it safe, and still tend to a lot of the time.

That being said, you could call me a bit of a ‘rule-breaker’ when it comes to the way I live my life holistically.

When I first stepped onto my wellness path, more than 5 years ago now, I did EVERYTHING by the book – I bought a cold pressed juicer, I got the Thermomix and started making raw cakes (#sugarfree), I took up yoga, downloaded all of the latest meditation apps, and read all of the ‘right’ books. I was a wellness cliche. But I did it all because I was so enticed by this ‘world’ of living my healthiest and happiest life. So naturally, I wanted to do it all ‘by the book’.

What were the people I looked up to doing? And I’m not talking generally, as a guide. I mean, exactly what were they doing so I could copy them? And if one of them says their gratitudes at night, and one writes them first thing in the morning, what the hell does that mean for me? Should I do it both times?

It has taken me until now to feel comfortable in bending these wellness ‘rules’ so that they suit my lifestyle. Because here’s the thing – I don’t ever want living my best, healthiest life to feel like a chore. If things are getting stale, and don’t feel right for ME – guess what? I am going to change it up. Just because it works for some, doesn’t mean it works for all.

Just because I am frothing on oracle cards and essential oils right now, doesn’t mean you have to! If you feel the pull, then amazing! But if you look at it and find it all a bit boring – that is also okay! Part of us being so amazingly intricate and different is that wellness is going to look DIFFERENT to us all. AND THAT IS OKAY.

These ‘rules’ we idealise when we set out on our wellness journeys are not necessarily doing us any favours – and can lead to feelings of guilt, comparisonitis and not feeling good enough, if we don’t keep them in check.

Here are a few of my old favourites…

To live a holistically healthy and well life, you DON’T have to:

Meditate every single day

Heck, there are going to be days you HATE the thought of meditating. And there will also be days you miss it. Or you might not even meditate at all because, CBF. When I started diving deeper into my wellness journey, I thought I needed to spend thousands on transcendental meditation classes, that I needed to sit with my mantra twice a day, and that Heaven forbid if I missed a day my hard work would all be for nothing.

Truth be told, meditation IS wonderful. But the way you meditate is going to be different to the way your bestie does, or the person you look up to. And that is okay. Play with it. Find what works for you – and know it will change over time. Right now, meditation for me is a guided 10 minutes as soon as I wake up. On Saturdays I skip it and always feel bad afterwards, but don’t beat myself up over it. And isn’t that the point? To embrace the stillness with ease and grace rather than guilt and shame?

Abstain from alcohol

This is a biggie, and one I am still coming to realise. Just because I am all about that well-life doesn’t mean a glass of wine with my love, or a mojito on a night out makes me any less spiritual or healthy. This comes down to the intention when you do choose to drink – if it is to have fun with friends, enjoy yourself or unwind after a full week, I say go for it. If there are deeper issues, like a dependency on alcohol to have fun, or a history of addiction – then that is a different story entirely. But just because you enjoy an espresso martini and a dance in a club doesn’t make you any less worthy of living a holistic and healthy life. Remember the FEELINGS around these things, like feeling GUILTY for drinking because you know there are people who don’t – is doing you less service than the alcohol itself. Remind yourself of your intention and you will know every time when you are drinking out of love, or out of fear. LOVE is the aim of the game kids.

Go gluten free

Don’t just go gluten free because everyone else is doing it. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER. Know WHY the healthy people in your world are choosing to opt out of eating gluten (myself included). Gluten is seriously detrimental not only to our gut health but our mental health too. The ingestion of gluten triggers a response known as ‘zonulin’ in our intestines, which leads not only to leaky gut (been there, done that, twice) but also a myriad of autoimmune conditions. Not a fun time. So no, it isn’t enough to just go gluten free ‘because everyone in the wellness world is doing it’. Educate yourself as to WHY and make your decision from there. Sometimes, I will have a bit of gluten – I never restrict myself – but when I do, I am always left feeling worse for wear.

Swap your fucks for fricks

If you watch my Insta-stories you know I love a good swear word. I use effs and shits like punctuation some days – and some days I don’t – but I rarely censor myself. If you have been a guest at one of my talks or workshops, you would know the same.

The way I see it is words are a form of self-expression. I do not use them offensively – I use swear words to make a point. For emphasis or to really express how I am feeling about certain topics I am particularly passionate about.

I think a lot of the time we have this idea that once we become ‘enlightened’ or on this spiritual path, not only do we need to clean up our diet, but we need to clean out our swear words. If that genuinely feels authentic and good for you, AMAZING. By all means, swap those fucks for fricks. But if you are doing it to try and emulate someone you’re actually not – well, there’s nothing authentic about that. And in holding on to your suppressed expression, you are actually doing yourself more harm than good.

Be well-read

Don’t get me wrong, the personal development section in Dymocks is my most favourite, and I have bookshelves FULL of self help cult classics that I am yet to read – and others that are dog-eared and totally loved.

But I also haven’t read Power of Now. I have tried to read it about 5 times and can’t get through it. I also didn’t enjoy The Universe Has Your Back – I couldn’t finish it.

Does this make me spiritually inept? Or is there something wrong with me when other wellness influencers are referencing books I didn’t actually enjoy?

Hell no! In fact, I find it kind of inauthentic when people claim they have read ALL of the self help books and enjoyed EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. How is that even possible? You aren’t going to like every single flavour of ice-cream (hmmm bad analogy, maybe you are) – and it’s the same thing here. Some authors will resonate with you more than others. Just because people are ALL about Power of Now doesn’t mean it has to be your cup of tea too.

Personally I am more of a Conversations with God kinda gal 😉

Cut people out of your life who aren’t on the same path

Don’t do this. It isn’t nice. And I see it a lot when people step out on their wellness journeys. There are people in their life that aren’t at the same ‘conscious level’ as them, and so they have a chat and let them know it’s time to no longer associate. Ummm – that’s not nice. And it’s also judgemental.

Here’s the thing – no, not everyone is going to be on your life path with you. And that is okay. Especially when it comes to family. You cannot force ANYONE, in fact you shouldn’t WANT to force anyone, to join you on your path to wellbeing. All you can do is be the example.

And if that doesn’t seem to work, and friendships or relationships naturally fall apart, then that is okay. There needn’t be drama or conflict or “this happened because you aren’t on the same path as me”. Watch the friendships that are meant to stay naturally flourish, and the ones that have served their purpose fall away. It doesn’t need to be any more complex than that.

Turn vegan

Power to you if you are. Or if you are paleo. Or pescetarian. WHATEVER you eat, I actually don’t care so long as you are doing the best you can with what you have. Try not to compare yourself to others and how they eat, and eat for HEALTH and what feels good for you.

It may surprise some of you to learn I have been vegetarian for 13 years now. I don’t proclaim it or shout it from the rooftops, because I just do it for me. It is MY choice. I have even received Instagram messages asking me if I would consider going vegetarian. When I reply and say I have been for over a decade now, I get asked why I don’t talk about it more.

Because what I eat shouldn’t matter to anyone really. I eat what makes my body thrive and feel good. If you thrive off organic, grass fed meat, then who am I to judge you? Just like I don’t expect to be judged when I eat a cheese plate.

Remember we are always doing the best we can with what we have. THAT is enough.

Like yoga

If you are taking up yoga to do the cool contortion tricks with your body to post on Instagram, then you are in it for ALL the wrong reasons. Yoga is such a wellness ‘thing’ because it is more than just the physical practice – it encompasses mind, body and soul wellbeing. I rarely post any yoga pics because that isn’t what yoga is for me. Again, it is a personal practice.

You might try yoga out and HATE it and wonder what the fuss is all about. If that is the case, no there is nothing wrong with you. You can still be into health and wellbeing and hate yoga, contrary to popular belief. Maybe the gym is more your thing, or swimming. WHATEVER your form of exercise is, there is none more ‘superior’ than the other – so embrace what you enjoy fully and don’t beat yourself up if downward dog makes you want to hurl.

Follow all of the wellness influencers, even when they make you feel shit

There was a time when I was following THOUSANDS of wellness influencers on my Inst – heck, anyone with the word ‘wellness’ in their bio got a big old tick from me. Recently I have scaled it right back, and will continue to do so, depending on what posts I resonate with.

For instance, once I was following ALL of the wellness nutritionists and cooks and was bombarded with recipes I knew I was never going to make. But I was following them because everyone else in the industry was. Once I let that idea go, I created more space for content that really appeals to me – and I know overtime that is going to evolve.

Follow the pages that truly light you up – they might be different to other people and that is okay. YOU have a direct say in the content you engage in – so if it makes you feel shit, even when the page’s intentions are good (I am referring to lots of fitspo accounts here) then unfollow.

By all means my loves, look up to influencers in the wellness space, get inspired, and take action. But also don’t force anything. Find what works for YOU and know it is totally okay however that looks. So long as your mind, body and soul are healthy, thriving and happy, it doesn’t matter so much how you get there.

The first week in July felt uncomfortable to me. Don’t get me wrong, each day was beautiful and filled with the usual gratitudes and positivity – but there was a real unease in the energy, and I was totally aware of why too.

Flipping through my journal pages from the first couple of days sums it up nicely:

1 July 2017

July for me feels like slowing down, really going within. Almost like preparing for BIG things. Doing the ground work – and the groundING work!

4 July 2017

May and June were such full months – I am fully embracing the space in July. For me, July is all about practicing patience, slowing down and TRUSTING everything is unfolding as it should – it always does.

5 July 2017

I am learning lots more these days to release control, embrace space and relax with flow. It makes me uncomfortable, but I know it is a big lesson for me.

6 July 2017

Gosh the theme of July is so blatantly SPACE. And PATIENCE. Each day has been full of tests, forcing me to slow down and just ‘be’. Truth be told, I have been resistant to it. There is this part of me that is rushed and forced. That pushes. I am being urged to embrace the feminine – to surrender. I need to fall into it. It won’t be easy, but it is necessary for my growth. To disconnect, to go within and allow for space. For NOTHING. My soul is craving it right now and the best thing I can do is listen to it.

7 July 2017

I feel really content and relaxed after a very easy, slow week. It really has taken me to this point to get comfortable slowing down – but I am now. When we take our time with things, we show the Universe that we have surrendered fully, and that we trust it. I don’t NEED to rush through life – no good comes of it. It is actually NICE to fully surrender – to go about my day doing whatever I please, allowing life to happen FOR me. That is a gift in itself.

12 July 2017

I LOVE JULY! I love moving through my days with ease and not forcing anything – I am being gifted multiple things a day by allowing for the space to receive. PLUS my soul is speaking loud and clear. I am so grateful – I couldn’t stop smiling yesterday because life is so beautiful.

Talk about a significant change in a short period of time! And it really did take up until now to completely, happily surrender with this month’s ‘theme’ of slowing down. And I am not the only one feeling this big shift in energy. To me, the second half of 2017 is about resting and restoring for a huge 2018. My first half of 2017 was epic and full and non-stop. Truth be told, I had NO time for myself, let alone my fiancé or my family or friends. Yes, that is the nature of owning a business – when the work is there, you take it. You work a month straight because you love what you do, and you have a huge vision.

But then, when the Universe gifts you with space – you must take that space too. Don’t resist it. Realise it has been gifted to you for a REASON! Will my business fall over if I take a bath at midday today because that’s what I want to do? Or if I get no client bookings on a Saturday, is it going to do me HARM to actually embrace the gift of a weekend off, rather than stress about where to fill my client space?

Too often we rush through our lives as if it were a race or a competition. Then when we reach a certain point – the point we would consider to be the ‘finish line’ – we move the markers. The point is an illusion – we never stop.

And it is to our own detriment. We burn ourselves out, start snapping at loved ones, our health suffers and we can’t remember the last time we did something for the FUN of it.

When life gifts you space – take it. Embrace it. And most importantly, resist the urge to FILL it. It has been gifted to you for a reason – get journalling and uncover why.

I’ll leave you with a little reflection I shared with my clients for the month of July – perhaps it will help you too:

PATIENCE

My darlings, July has presented a really strong theme to me, and a few other ‘connected’ women I know – and I wanted to share it here with you all too.

The second half of 2017 feels like a time to go within: to slow down, to ‘hibernate’ and take stock of how far you have come.

It is NOT a time to push, to rush or to race to a certain point. There can be discomfort in this – resisting the urge to get from point A to point B as quickly as possible (don’t I know it) – but we are really being guided to slow down. I keep getting: slow and steady wins the race.

So if you have been feeling out of breath lately, like you aren’t doing enough and that there aren’t enough hours in the day: know that there IS and you ARE. You are enough by simply just being. And that the biggest growth will happen for you when you sit in silence, practice presence and fully accept where you are RIGHT NOW.