Affidavit of Truth

Hello! I would suspect that My first document to Your office, the ‘Certificate of Life’, 1 probably does not contain all the information necessary to satisfy the legal requirements of a proper title or deed to My real estate – that’s okay. I’m not really interested in entertaining any legal fictions, I really just want You to know that I am live and well. I’m not standing on the land (though I have done many times in the past), I am sitting in a chair in front of a computer, typing You this letter. Just to be clear, I’m also not lost at sea, I’m in a bedroom of a house with a foundation firmly on the ground. Yes, yes, I know that I am supposed to tell You who My mother and father are, when they were born, where they were born, the time I was born, and probably an extensive list of other rather boring details. I’m not going to do any of this because You already have all these details carefully recorded in ‘Canada Vital Statistics’ on the ‘Record of Live Birth’ that was registered by My parents and I don’t want to be too repetitive. Frankly, I’m not entirely convinced that all of the information is true and correct anyway; I was obviously there for the event or I wouldn’t be Writing You now but I really don’t remember much about it, it’s really just hearsay (and potentially also heresy) aside from the names. The most important thing is that You know I am live and well.

For the common man wishing to inherit the Kingdom of God, the whole thing can be rather intimidating. My aim is to keep things simple so that there are no misunderstandings. I should point out that I am Writing You in English. Once again, this would seem painfully obvious as You have already read a good portion of this Affidavit which would be impossible if You were not familiar with the language. However, the distinction needs to be made to avoid any confusion. Apparently there is a language called ‘Legalese’ that is commonly used in the legal community that uses exactly the same Words I’m using here though they have entirely different meanings! I know… Crazy, right? (Rhetorical, I’m not really expecting You to answer that and even if You did, I can’t hear You so the point would be mute – literally). But it’s true! It’s very clever and highly deceptive. It actually made Me rather angry when I first discovered this fact but I want You to know I’m over it now.

I mentioned that I’m not entirely sure all the details on the ‘Record of Live Birth’ are true and accurate because I don’t remember that day very well. In fact, I don’t remember it at all! Strangely enough, I do remember choosing to come to this world but the earliest memory I have after that was roughly five years and nine months later, give or take. I talk about this in My Book2 (which is also an Affidavit of Truth) in much greater detail and something I felt You should have on record should there be any remaining concerns with regards to My intentions. The ‘Record of Live Birth’ claims I was born on the fifth of June, nineteen seventy-three, A.D. The problem here is that A.D., is an acronym for Anno Domini, or ‘year of dominion/domination’. I don’t judge people for their sexual preferences but I’m not into the whole pseudo-masochist thing and I really don’t like to be dominated, I just want to be free. It also seems likely that the world is considerably older than what the Gregorian calendar claims it to be. Some think this ‘A.D.’ calendar represents how many years have passed since the death of Christ and that’s a whole other thing altogether – I have no way of knowing if Christ even existed, let alone when he died! This letter is to dispel (dis-‘spell’, undo the Black Magic of the Bible and Black’s Law) any magical time frame I may have unknowingly been cast into by way of My ignorance.

The ‘Certificate of Life’ is a proper title deed to My Kingdom because I say it is. I am the Law in My Kingdom (My Mind, Body and Soul). The purpose of these letters is a matter of courtesy to set the record straight. It would be ludicrous to presume that I must compose a ‘Declaration of Life’ in any particular way to inherit the right to My Kingdom, or that I would ever surrender the right to exclusive authority over My Kingdom under any circumstance, much less for the sake of benefiting some foreign entity (corporate title, nation, corporation etc.) and any claims to the contrary are absolutely against My Will, unconscionable, fraudulent, self-destructive, seditious, trespass, insane or void prima facie for lack of full disclosure.

You will receive another notice from Me shorty outlining the laws of My Kingdom and how I will generate coin of the realm so I may lawfully engage in commerce to promote prosperous, harmonious relations between Our great nation states. Thank You for Your time, have a blessed day,