Men under pressure

SHARE | Tuesday, 09 February 2016 | By Ontametse Sugar

WHAT TO BUY FOR HER; A silky red dress, pump heels,perfume and a lip stick for women

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and as usual more men than women are under pressure to impress. “Women should stop thinking that it is their right to receive gifts from men. They talk equality every day and how they want to be an equal half to their partners, then why can’t they just do the same and pamper their men. Some women are just too self-absorbed,” one male said. “I don’t think women are being selfish but I think is the way gender issues and culture have always affected us on that aspect. We have always been made to believe that men are the givers and providers, that is why we expect a lot from them sometimes,” one female said.

Psychologist Kerekolotswe Ben blamed the selfishness of women on the media, because it is the one that has always portrayed it in such a way that only women gifts are available. She made reference of how all the television adverts will be focusing more on what you can get for ‘her’ and what you can do for ‘her’ than what you can get for ‘him’. “This then makes men to be under so much pressure in order to try and satisfy their other halves,” Ben said. Devoted youth leader from Assemblies of God church Mogakolodi Mmolotsi said that to him Valentine is a day that men should show love to their loved ones.

He said it is not that they have not loved each other, but to appreciate the woman even more, as the bible talks about a man loving a woman. He said men should even go an extra mile to appreciate their women. “In the bible men and women have never been treated to be equals, in Ephesians 5 verse 25 going down do verse 33, it talks about husbands loving their wives, and how they ought to love them the way they love their bodies, so this alone makes it right for men to pamper their women at any given time, Valentine or no Valentine,” Mmolotsi said. He added that since it will be Sunday on this year’s Valentine, going to church would be a great way for most lovers to start their day.

He said there are those that might use the day as an excuse to demand gifts from men, but some men also want to be pampered on the day. He said it is important in everyday lives for couples to pamper each other despite any special occasion. He said it is also easy to make it a two way thing because in the beginning relationships have always been about two parties and they will always be.