New foster cat issues - mostly a sleep issue!

I'm looking for advice on this because I don't want to always bother the welfare officer with these issues, she's got enough on her plate.

I have had a new foster cat for about a week. She was with her previous family from kitten age and she's now about seven, so of course she's nervous about this change. In most ways she's as good as gold, but I'm finding night time a struggle.

During the day she is happy to be upstairs by herself and doze, but once it's the evening she stays close to me constantly and doesn't want to be alone. I tend to keep foster cats downstairs at night because I'm a terrible sleeper, I also have a special pillow because of a neck injury. I was told she doesn't like to sleep alone and was willing to try it, but when I say she likes to stay close to me, it's to the extent that she tries to share my pillow! And she's a little mardy arse if I try to even move her back a bit, so she takes over half the pillow and I have a stiff neck and headache in the morning.

I kept her downstairs last night, for the second time, and both times found her wedged in a little hiding place, terrified. I feel bad because she makes it clear she sleeps in my bed, to the point of prompting me with meows around 11pm!

If I make her sleep downstairs is she likely to get over her fear, or will I be making her miserable?

I've been trained by a long succession of Siamese. (Who have absolute bed rights - in fact, they regard being excluded from bed as an actual punishment.) I'd be real chary about making her sleep downstairs. I think she might end up a wreck from the sound of it.

Do you know her breeding? And have you actually allowed her inside the bed eg downaways from the pillow? That might be better for you.

She's not a traditionally highly strung breed now, she's a tabby - with symmetrical black markings on her back that make her look like a walking inkblot test.

I hadn't thought of letting her inside the covers no. I know that she doesn't think a roomy handpicked spot next to my legs is any good, she insists on being literally right next to my head. But if she doesn't go for the pillow plan, I'll try that. I won't leave her on her own again. Anyway, she's such a sweetie, I can't imagine I'll have her for very long, so if she's determined that we must be pillow buddies I'll just keep reminding myself of that!

She actually sounds as if she just might have some Siamese or Oriental in her even if she's officially a DSH. (And given the male Siamese I've run across, if one of those got out, they'd at least be attempting to fraternise with half the cats in the UK!)

I think I'd try to let her go inside the bed and under the covers - your poor neck!

She's going to make someone a very fond companion when your foster is over though.

Sorry. I should have made clear that a 'failed foster' (in Litter Tray terms, anyway) is when you take a cat for fostering and bond wth it so strongly that it becomes your very cat and you can't give it back.

Personally, it's a job I couldn't really do - I think I'd likely become too emotional about my charges.

Not laughing in the least. Although any Siamese worth their salt would take one look at a cuddly toy and say/make it clear that they were thinking ' Very nice - and now budge over so that I can cuddle in!'

I saw a beatiful Siamese yesterday at our cat rescue centre, stunning. We went to look at a boy that had been on their website for 24 hours & when we arrived he had been reserved already, subject to checks.

My DD cried alllllll the way home, he was the first one in 6 months that was suitable to live with under 5s.

Hes called Max & I cant help thinkibg they named him after Eastender actor Max Branning, as they are both ginger

Oh, I'm afraid my finances are a bit wobbly at the moment, so fostering gives me feline company without any costs or long term responsibility. Failed fosters are not an option!

But a second pillow on the bed worked perfectly last night. She did still reverse her bum till it touched my head but it only took up an inch or two of my own pillow so I was happy with that, and no headache this morning