Hong Kong, the socially conservative southern Chinese metropolis, has a problem — none of its citizens seem especially eager to have sex, which is the result, say sexperts, of living in a crowded, expensive city where tiny, shared living spaces present all kinds of hurdles to uninhibited fucking.

According to World Bank statistics, the career-driven, fiance-obsessed mentalities of young Hong Kong residents have led to a fertility rate among the lowest in the world, at 1.04 births per woman. Emil Ng, associate director at the Family Institute of the University of Hong Kong, has noticed a trend of low sexual activity among the city's younger residents, a phenomenon he attributes to a lack of sexual knowledge and a lack of available space. Says Ng, "People say Hong Kongers have the least amount of sexual knowledge in the world. One of the reasons is they have no place to have sex."

Ng also points out that, because living Hong Kong can be so prohibitively expensive for young workers, many people are postponing dating and marriage in order to save money by living with their parents well into their 20s and 30s, a choice that obviously makes having sex just that much more bed-creakingly treacherous. Moreover, according to a 2008 study conducted by British condom-maker Durex, Hong Kong ranked third-lowest in the world in sexual confidence. Though Ng cautions that Durex may not be employing the most scientific research methods, he says that the informal surveys still say a lot about sexual activity in Hong Kong. In a similar survey released last year, 39 percent of respondents claimed total sexual inactivity, a 15-percentage point increase from 2006.

Particularly hard-pressed for sex, though, are Hong Kong's women, who outnumber men in the city by more than 12 to 1. Due to cultural issues tied to wealth, class, and the social expectations of a patriarchal society, heterosexual women lead the most sexually unfulfilled lives in Hong Kong, at least according to sexologist Dr. Petula Ho. "Straight women in Hong Kong," says Ho, "are in poverty in terms of sex. They have few sexual possibilities and options. Even if you're a male truck driver, you can find a woman in rural China."

Of course, the obvious solution to all this abstinence is for everyone in Hong Kong to engage in one giant, barrier-breaking orgy. Then, cramped living arrangements won't be a problem because the city will be one seething pile of sex. Problem solved, Hong Kong. You're welcome.