Forum » Topic: Steaming Dog Turd slips eight placeshttp://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758
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Golgo13 on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137821
Wed, 12 Sep 2012 10:58:49 +0000Golgo13137821@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Factoid: Excellent.
</p>dvo4fun on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137817
Wed, 12 Sep 2012 10:19:45 +0000dvo4fun137817@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>For some reason I hear this sub being read by 'Steve Wright in the Afternoon' on Radio2
</p>Yikes on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137811
Wed, 12 Sep 2012 09:44:22 +0000Yikes137811@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Oops ... Riesler got in first with Michael Barrymore suggestion ... I need glasses ...
</p>Midfield Diamond on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137241
Fri, 07 Sep 2012 12:19:28 +0000Midfield Diamond137241@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>I should be ashamed for laughing at such a juvenile sub but the first sentence is succinct and very funny. Stars.
</p>Squudge on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137197
Fri, 07 Sep 2012 05:21:52 +0000Squudge137197@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>your list needs a re-shuffle</p>
<p>Jeremy C Hunt woefully under-estimated in the rankings, and no sign of Baroness Warsi.<br />
I would also drain the pool if I spotted a grinning Milliband.</p>
<p>...stars from me anyway
</p>riesler on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137114
Thu, 06 Sep 2012 08:39:51 +0000riesler137114@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Michael Barrymore?
</p>Gerontius on "Steaming Dog Turd slips eight places"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=47758#post-137109
Thu, 06 Sep 2012 08:17:52 +0000Gerontius137109@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>A recent poll carried out by Ipsos MORI has shown that the common dog turd is no longer the number one ‘most unwelcome thing to find in your swimming pool’ ...losing the top spot to Education Secretary Michael Gove.<br />
In fact MORI say that following the PM’s cabinet reshuffle, the lowly dog turd has slipped several places to eigth position in the MUTTFIYSP league – its lowest ranking for over 25 years.<br />
The dog turd - which held on to the top spot for an unbroken 24 years before being replaced briefly in the mid 80’s by Tory high-flier Norman Lamont – has been under increasing pressure from a number of high profile public figures in recent months and is no longer seen as the nation’s most repulsive party guest.<br />
Although seen as cause for celebration amongst advocates of the freshly shat dog turd, critics say there is still a long way to go before the festering faeces becomes a permanent fixture on the pool-party circuit.<br />
Dog turds were reminded that although they no longer occupy the number one spot in the public consciousness, they were up against very strong Tory opposition, with some particularly loathsome creatures entering the Top 10 for the first time and should not get too carried away with their 8th place ranking.<br />
But there is much to be optimistic about for the common dog turd, with critics agreeing that this may well be a golden age for David Cameron’s Tory party with the likelihood of ever putting together a cabinet with characters as repellent and odious as this lot now seen as virtually impossible.<br />
And with such a loathsome bunch of characters set to be around for another 2 ½ years, it could be some time before the turd regains its number one crown.<br />
But it looks as though Chris Waddles chances of ever reaching the number one spot have finally gone for good. His penalty miss against the Germans in the World Cup semi-finals has kept the woeful Geordie in the Top 10 for over 20 years but with the cabinet reshuffle still fresh in people’s minds, not even the threat of eating a puppy live on air will help make him appear more loathsome in this nation of pet lovers - not while William Hague still has a day job to go to.<br />
Some critics have warned that if the Tories win the next election, the whole ‘swimming-pool guest’ landscape could change forever and we may never see a spiralling dog-turd reach the top of the unwelcome pile ever again.<br />
That list in full<br />
No.01 : Education Secretary Michael Gove<br />
No.02 : Community Secretary Eric Pickles<br />
No.03 : Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt<br />
No.04 : PM David Cameron<br />
No.05 : Chancellor George Osborne<br />
No.06 : Culture Secretary Maria Miller<br />
No.07 : A&amp;R oligarch Simon Cowell<br />
No.08 : Dog turd<br />
No.09: World Cup penalty misser Chris Waddle<br />
No.10 : Space waster Jeremy Clarkson
</p>