I really have no idea what my sexual proclivities has to do with my hair.

Other than hair is a sexy thing.

If I want to look sexy, what does it matter if I am dressing up for my male partner or for the group of people (trans/bi/gay/lesbian/straight) that I wish to appeal to.

Sexual orientation has nothing at all to do with how sexy one wants to appear.

It seems to me there are a lot of people here that talk about church and mention their religious ties. Perhaps fear is one of the big reasons people don't talk about being in an alternative group. Or maybe the reason is that sexual preference is really no ones business and really has nothing to do with their hair, and talking about their sexual preferences is really off topic for the most part, on a board that is about hair.

What is interesting however, is that you think that the act of wanting to appear more sexually attractive is only a feminine thing. Have you any idea how much the metrosexual types preen themselves? They work out for hours, cleanse, toner, mousse, gel... you name it just like us girls. The wealthy ones spend thousands on clothes, shoes, watches, cars and whatever, just to appear sexy enough for the women they want. It's ALL ABSURD. But it's normal and we all do it.

So if you're worried about being too feminine, don't.

Originally Posted by SusieSuze

Thanks for your input, but that's actually not what I meant at all. I realize I wasn't very clear, but what I meant was that for a lot of people, femininity is very much tied in with their hair and the general principle of how much work and time they put into their appearance. Not always, not for everyone, but for a lot of people. I was wondering if anyone wanted to chime in and express something about their hair and experience of gender that they might not feel comfortable expressing elsewhere on the boards for reasons you've outlined pretty well.

What I meant about my own femininity was just that it's not typical for me to feel that way, and the fact that this is where that side of me comes out is another interesting piece to incorporate into my personal identity matrix. I'm certainly not uncomfortable with it, and DEFINITELY not passing judgment on anyone of any gender who chooses to fuss over their hair a lot. It's just a thing I've noticed.