Play MASH With Characters From ‘M*A*S*H’

Hey kids, what’s the best way to find out your future? Why, the classic game MASH of course. Will you end up with a bunch of little kids, or childless? Will you achieve your dream job, or a soulless dead-end position? Will you settle down in a mansion, an apartment, a shack, or a house? Most importantly: will you end up with a hunk like Hawkeye, or a weirdo like Klinger?

Yes, with the long-running sitcom M*A*S*H hitting Netflix this month, wouldn’t it make sense to play the classic fortune-telling game with our favorite military medical staff members who were up to a variety of shenanigans in the Korean War? I know, I know: it’s nerve-wracking to trust your fifth-grade luck when it comes to your romantic future (especially when you have the chance to end up with B. J. Hunnicutt, swooon). But much like suicide, MASH is painless.

If you’ve forgotten the rules, simply grab a pencil and draw a few circular swirls. After doing that, draw a line through the circle and count how many times the line intersects with your scribbling. Use that number to count through the items on the handy M*A*S*H MASH board below (designed by Decider’s own Jaclyn Kessel, with help from our local M*A*S*H fanatic Conrad Doucette), marking off every item you land on until there’s only one left in each category. And voila: you have your future, which is totally going to come true and is in no way a big dumb joke.