The V.P. Debate: Joe Biden and Paul Ryan Tie - Martha Raddatz Wins!

Biden said that George Clooney, Eva Longoria, and Brett Favre all texted him and told him he won the debate.

DANVILLE, Kentucky - In one of the liveliest Vice-Presidential Debates in the history of Vice-Presidential Debates there was really no clear cut victor between Vice-President Joe Biden and non-vice-president Paul Ryan.

The national political publication The Political Drive Thru Window did report that the debate moderator Martha Raddatz did come out on top.

Mistletoe Bulova, with PDTW, who sat next to Jill Biden, stated that although the vice-president had tons and tons of facts which he incorporated and Paul Ryan rattled off facts and figures from the top of his head, neither candidate was declared the winner.

Biden did capture the smirking category as he was caught smirking a total of 47 times during the 90 minute debate.

Ryan won the hair combing department, as he was observed combing his hair a total of 31 times.

President Obama was asked who he felt won the debate. He grinned and replied, "My boy Joey did some serious butt-kicking tonight and I am so proud of the fella that I am giving him a 20 percent raise retroactive back to Easter."

Meanwhile Governor Mitt Romney stated, "My GOP ticket partner, Little Bunny Foo Foo really showed the American people that he is ready for the big leagues."

Surprisingly neither of the candidates was asked about the late breaking story that Arizona's presidential election votes will not be allowed and are in fact being totally disqualified.

The reason why is still being investigated by the FBI, the CIA, the Secret Service, and PETA.

After the debate the Biden family and the Ryan family all went to dinner together at a local Captain Cluckity Cluck Clucks Chicken Shack.

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