Public Enemy #1

In an apparent attempt to try and look cool and compensate for what is no doubt his incredulously small Johnson, Columbian soccer player Luis Moreno punted –yes, punted- an owl who wandered on to the field. The owl later died.

The owl was the mascot of the opposing team. The only saving grace is that everyone else in the venue seemed to recognize this son of a bitch’s dementia and was instantly outraged, chanting “Killer, Killer, Killer” and could face up to 3 months in jail, and a $50,000 peso, or a $26 fine.This is easily the most sickening display of barbarism since Michael Vick, especially since it was done in front of thousands of people. Moreno, through an apology perhaps only motivated by public outrage, said that he was trying to help the bird by waking it up. The bird had been hit a few minutes before by a ball and was disoriented and had a broken wing, and wandered on to the field.

Moreno had to be escorted from the stadium by police. Here’s hoping that Columbian prisons are less humane than his own exhibition.