Why Don’t We Stand up for Ourselves?

If you a fan of MTV Shuga like me, I’m sure you’d love this new season MTV Shuga DownSouth. I’m always making sure I have data to watch the next episode every Saturday morning.

One character that gets to me aside all my other favorite characters is Tsholo- the beautiful light skinned girl…

Tsholo is a regular high school student who loves the good things of life- phones, clothes and other material things. She met a a bus driver, Sol, who gave her all she wants and that made him the over possessive boyfriend.

Tsholo is one who is always quick to advise her bestie, Khensani, on easy ways to get out of her mess, but the question is how she never thought to get out of her own mess.

Her relationship with Sol is more like a boss and a subject. Sol controls her and treat her like a puppet, tells her what to do, how to do it and when to do it and he sleeps with her against her will every time.

Yet Tsholo doesn’t find a way to deal with the demon in her life but always focus on Khensani issues and always trying to tell her how to get out of her own mess.

What am I trying to pass across?

We have friends who are always quick in dishing out advise to us on how to get out of mess and challenges. These ones are always the perfect friends we run to in times of problems, and we all see them as free from issues too but they are the ones with the most imperfect life.

They are unhappy, sad, troubled. They used our own lives to create an utopia of how they wish their own lives should be but they fail to apply such in their lives because they are not courageous as they appear to be.

We have people we look up to, fancy, envy and even extremely jealous of but if they really tell us of the demon they fight personally everyday, we’d be more affectionate towards them.

We actually never pay attention to these ones because we feel they got it all figured out but they are the most scared, beaten and terrified.

Look around you, you have such friends, sisters, brothers and mentors. Let’s try to get close to them and pay attention to them. They need us but not courageous enough to speak out. They are scared. They need help and until someone come out for them, they will continue to live with that demon and showing us the exact opposite of who they actually are. You can tell from their actions, some will even hint us but many times we are so consumed with our own worry that we don’t listen to them.

Call them, speak to them soul to soul, don’t accept their ‘I’m fine’, trouble them, make them laugh, take them out, have fun, create memories with them until they are so comfortable to talk to you and help them get out of that situation.

Be a shoulder they can lean on.

Have you ever met someone like this before? How did you help them speak out and get out of that difficult situation? Did it work? Did you feel good afterwards?

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