Baconsale Episode 64: Tournament of Disney Villains (Final Round)

We think it’s time to say goodbye to Prince Abubu…er, our Tournament of Disney villains as we wrap up our bracket of bad guys. Joel and Kent have brought their best (and most desperate) arguments for who they think should advance in each round. We use our wits, we use our logic and we don’t underestimate the importance of body language. In this episode, you’ll hear us debate fights such as Gaston vs. Captain Hook, Maleficent vs. Governor Ratcliffe and Ursula vs. Chernabog.

The discussion gets pretty heated at times, and you may call us a codfish because of some of our decisions, but we hope you enjoy this finale of our tournament of animated antagonists.

Suggestions for future brackets: Duo Bracket (teams of 2 fight it out, like Edward and Bella vs the supernatural bros.. I just want to hear how the supernatural guys would completely annihilate Twilight), Team Bracket (Think the A-Team vs. Captain Planet and the Planeteers, or The Lost Boys from Peter Pan vs. the Ewoks hahaha), Monster Bracket, a bracket hopper might win but shouldn’t.. just a few ideas.

Monster bracket could also be horror movie antagonist bracket. But that may be hard to make a family friendly fight between something like Freddy vs Jason or Samara vs the Grudge girl or something. It would be fun to have Dracula v Frankenstein or The creature from the Black Lagoon v Nosferatu. You know, kind of a classic movie monsters bracket. Or a mashup of the two and some random ones like Godzilla or Jaws.

BOOOOOO to that final. BOOOOOO. hahahaha I’m pretty angry at that verdict. why am I so mad about a Disney bracket final? I shouldn’t be this fiery over this. I almost tied for a chance to win a t-shirt hahaha

I am still trying to figure out how an immortal being loses. Especially when Hades is one of the more competent villains. Oh well it is all about the fun anyway. I mean look at how far Hopper made it. No bearing on reality. If reality included animated mythical beings.

I’m sorry, but to say that Ursula can just run and hide under water is a stupid way to win. With that argument, Maleficent can run and hide inland somewhere where Ursula can’t reach her. If Ursula comes on land, she has to turn into a human, in her octupus form she dies on land.

Seriously, let’s go through the bad judgment calls:
Hopper (a grasshopper) taking out Prince John (a lion) – completely unbelievable. Even the weakest lion can take out the strongest grasshopper.
Dr. Facilier beating the Evil Queen – The “murderous” EQ totally wins against the “tricky” Dr. F.
Cruella beating Gothel – Again, no freaking way. A precancerous anorexic fashion designer cannot beat a woman who took out the Stabbington Bros with a tree branch.
Even though I liked the Hook v Ursula battle, there is no way Hook beats Gaston. Why does the battle take place on the ocean or near Hook’s ship. It could easily take place on land where Hook doesn’t have his ship. And to say Hook’s hook is a formidable weapon is to disregard how utterly useless the design is. Have you seen the way the hook is designed. The point is almost back at the base, there is no way you can stab anyone in the temple with that.
Then picking the precancerous anorexic fashion designer over a cunning, quick, invisible giant six legged evil salamander was so dumb. She is inept and incapable of fighting at all.
Ratigan beating the stabbingtons would never happen. He’s a rat. Sure he’s a smart rat, but because he is smart and civilized, he would not have the hanta virus or the black plague. The Stabbingtons have swords and daggers, and they’re huge. Ratigan would come with a very poorly made robot that could only fool other rodents, and the Stabbingtons would kick it over. Any crossbow fired by a rat would not have the strength to pierce the leather clothing worn by the Stabbingtons.
And while I said I didn’t care about the final battle, I was amazed (even though I shouldn’t be given the above history of poor decisions) that the battle went to Ursula. Ursula, a sea witch who can just turn people into polyps and turn herself into a larger version of herself. Even with the trident of power, she was killed by the prow of a ship. She totally loses to Maleficent.