WASHINGTON DC- Listing the merits of the proposed pipeline plan in front of congress Saturday, house republicans touted the bill’s unparalleled ability to bring globs to the people of America.… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

Silver City- Vowing to avenge his slaughtered parents to his quickly impending last breath, local 10 year old Timmy Baker found he was experiencing some “pretty crazy changes” after falling… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

Family Dog Hailed As Hero After Waking Family During Fire, Calling 911, Following Up With Insurance Claims For Damages Judge Allows It, But You Better Be Going Somewhere With This… Read more HEADLINES →

AUSTIN, TX- Area woman Maria Billings is in critical condition after being struck Sunday by a 2013 Maserati GranTurismo PRT S-Class equipped not only with state of the art 4-wheel… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

New York, NY- Onlookers today at Manhattan’s iconic Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade were stunned as they witnessed a rogue Guy Fieri speed out of an alleyway and join the procession in… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

CAMBRIDGE, MA- After months of intensive study into blueprints, creations, and journals by turn of the century innovator Thomas Edison, Historians today announced the inventor was in fact the nation’s… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

Anthropomorphized Dog Still Wants To Hump Your Leg Tour Guide Won’t Shut Up About City’s Historical Significance And Tell You Where The Drugs Are Already Local Medium Admits She Can… Read more HEADLINES →

A CARTOON ISLAND- Sources confirmed earlier this week that despite one leprechaun’s constant paranoia, animated children were not in fact ‘after his Lucky Charms’. “Red balloons, shooting stars, four leaf… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →

DENVER- Immediately after touching down for a layover this afternoon, sources confirmed area sales representative Jeremy Lansing, 34, switched his phone out of airplane mode unleashing a deluge of texts,… Read more NEWS IN BRIEF →