If anyone knows what movie that's from without googling it I'll actually be impressed.

Anyway, I need serious advice. I've already asked in other forums, asked my friends, and this is the last stop for me to get some input if anything at all. Basically, I met a girl online that I sort of like. We get along very well and have been talking for a few months. Soon after I had met her, I told her that I was just interested in being friends because I wasn't really super into her. But the more I got to know her, the more I liked her. Early on I had said I wouldn't mind hanging out sometime in the future.

So fast forward a month or two, lots of messaging back and forth. We definitely have chemistry. I'm shy and dorky so I'll never bring up actually hanging out or asking her. In one of my messages I said, "blah blah I'll tell you this joke whenever we hang out." Next message, she said, "Speaking of which, would you maybe want to hang out next weekend?"

I almost had trouble breathing. DEFCON 1 shit for me. I said yes obviously, and so this Saturday we're getting coffee. Pretty simple. Was wondering if you guys had any tips. I mean, this is basically a date. I'm not really good at this kind of thing so if you have any serious advice or suggestions, I'm open to them.

Is it true that men are usually expected to pay on the first date? That's a load of bullocks if it's true. What happened to gender equality? What the fuck is this shit if men are still expected to pay? I don't mind doing it at all, but just the idea that this is an expectation kills me.

That's an interesting way of looking at it, I never really considered her thoughts/perspective before.

Well, she's kind of shy and introverted like me. So she's probably nervous too. I messaged her and told her not to be nervous, and that we'll have fun tomorrow. I'm not sure what she wants to get out of it honestly, I don't know her well enough to be able to read her mind yet.

I've talked to all my friends and lots of people have given me input. I think I'm ready to be a man. You guys will either hear from me Saturday night or you'll see me on the news. Wish me luck!

Thanks for the help for everyone who replied. I had a good time. She was a lot cuter in person. I was 10 minutes late because I showed up at the wrong Starbucks.

We had coffee, talked for 2 hours, walked around and checked out this bookstore for another hour, then she went back to her dorm and I went home. I was really unsure what to say at the conclusion of our date. I said, "Hey, I really enjoyed meeting you. You're even more lovely in person, and I want to see you again." Then I hugged her.

She wants to meet up again too, but next time I want to like...make it clear I'm interested in her and ask her how she feels about that. I like this girl, if I get 'friend-zoned' I'm probably going to kill myself metaphorically.

I'm going to give you the most important piece of advice any moron who likes a girl can get. Because whether you are new to this old to this or whatever most people make the same mistake. And it might not seem like a big deal to you but it is.

Yeah you've talked to the cunt for a while online and you both enjoyed your time and you're into her. Kewl but you're am idiot of you tell. The biggest bitch boy thing you could do is say you're interested in her and ask what you thinks like you said.

I know you want to mark your territory in case there's other guys in her life however you'd be looking like a bitch boy of you asked. DONT ASK that and DONT say you like her. You'll make that obvious through your actions. Just don't say it. I'm telling you it's the biggest bitch boy mistake that bitch boys make.

Um, did someone edit Nard's post or is that really how he decided to phrase it? o.0

Also she's not a cunt dude, she's an art major.

And I'm not sure I agree with what you said. I've done this before with a girl, not made my intentions clear, and then I realized that she had a boyfriend and the whole time she was just being really friendly. That's why I want to be more direct this time. I don't want to put pressure on her, we'll hang out again and I'll read the situation and make a move based on how I feel.

I don't want to like kiss her on the cheek suddenly and have her pull away im afraid I might start crying if something like that happened

You met her for the first time and you want to tell her you really like her. First impressions in relationships are meaningless. Most people are amazing on the first date. Especially when you're a bitch boy like you. Any girl will give you a chubby.

There's no need to say I like you and I'm interested on the second date bitch boy. You can show her through actions. I hate myself for saying this but this is where you use your "game." It might be hard because you want her to know and guys generally fall for girls faster but you have to keep your composure. You have to balance it out. Act interested and at the same time act indifferent.

Nobody likes things that are easy. Especially women. Once she knows that you're really into Nd she can have you immediately she's going to get bored really fast. You have to make her want you. And by NOT telling her you're really into her is how you do this. Make her wonder.

And bitch boy. The next time you plan to hang out don't sAy yes to the day she asks for. Pretend you have some sort of life outside of these boards and smelling like a rotten spices.

And don't worry about her having a boyfriend. There's probNly other guys in her life. But she met you online and agreed to go out. So there's some interest there. Use it to your advantage bitch boy.

And if you have to tell her wait until she says something of that nature or at least wait til several dates later. For fuck sake don't tell her on the second date.

Tldr you're gonna look like a bitch boy when I get to do the ratboysitoldyousoact if you don't listen.

You know, despite the fact that it was really distracting and hard to take your post seriously since you kept calling me a 'bitch boy,' I think I get what you're saying. On second thought, I won't say anything like that when we hang out again. I'll just try to make sure she has a good time and stuff.

I read on this forum about something called 'negging.' Basically you say sort of mean things about the girl and try to get her to feel bad about herself, and then you be supportive so she likes you. That's not really the type of thing I'd do but maybe I'll consider saying something like "you shouldn't wear lipstick."

I'm still confused about who pays. Like when we hung out we just had coffee which I covered. She said I didn't have to and was taking out her wallet, but I said it was fine.

Now if we get lunch next time or whatever, who pays? How does it work?? What do I say?

@Mac, I dunno. I wouldn't marry a nation of prostitutes, I have standards dude.

Well man.. it's sad that you're looking to these clown's for advice, but there are some valid points in here.

For one, wine coolers went out in the 90's along with bright colored clothes, pogs and pokemon cards. Unless you're both into it, don't take Gunners advice or else your trophy cabinet will be as barren as the Gunners.

Second. Don't be emotional.. chicks see that shit and think "Aww.. this is the guy I can tell all my girly secrets with and have sleep overs with and he can paint my nails and we can share tampons with"

Third. Don't be clingy. This ties in with number two. Yeah, text and chat with her but don't be the guy that text her every day wanting to know what she's doing this and that. There is a definite difference between chatting and wanting to know every detail of her day. Moment you start being clingy you start harboring self doubt, thinking she's with another guy like Stam or something then you're gonna hate yourself and ruin everything you're working for.

Fourth. Be yourself. Nothing turns a girl off more then when she goes along something like "So you like (Insert topic)" and you don't know shit about it. No lies, none of that shit. Be yourself and you won't have any problems. If she doesn't like you for being you then she isn't for you.

Now as far as the whole 'who pays's' thing, just.. let it flow. Don't be a fucking bum and have her pay for everything. Bare minimum you pay for your own shit. If you can float it, be nice every now and then and pick up her end. Don't let her think that the wallet is gonna pop out everytime she get's eyes for something nice, or likes a movie or something. Be nice, but don't go over board. This is about you and her.. not her and your wallet.

I appreciate the tips dude, they're all pretty sound. I'm definitely not going to be clingy, she actually messaged me later that day so that's a good sign. I'll be busy next weekend, but the one after that I'm definitely going to try to hang out with her again.

Hah, I'm not worried about being a bum...I'm more worried about paying for everything. I'm a few years older than she is, but I only work a little part-time so I'm not exactly loaded. Like I said, I paid for coffee because it's just coffee but I don't want to set like the precedence that I'll always pay. But I'm not sure how to handle that gracefully in future get-togethers.

Would it be okay to just not say anything? Like we both go on line and order food separately? I have no issue treating her once in a while just to reiterate. But there are some guys I've talked to who said that men should always pay for dates. That sounds like a bad deal to me, like you said, it's not about her and my wallet.

Also, >don't take Gunners advice or else your trophy cabinet will be as barren as the Gunners.