We lost our little one

Ladies--my husband and I lost our third child around 2:30 Wednesday morning. †I had been diagnosed with a SCH about three weeks earlier, but my doctor was so reassuring. †The baby was growing beautifully. †The heartbeat was strong. †I was on pelvic rest, taking it easy. †I did absolutely everything right. †I am so angry, heartbroken, lost . . . †I woke up around 2:15 am, feeling fine but thirsty. †I got a glass of milk, returned to bed, and immediately an intense cramp/contraction set in. †Then I felt a small gush. †I rushed to the bathroom, bleeding, and within minutes I delivered our perfect little baby at just 14 weeks, 5 days. †The baby was absolutely perfect in every way--just far too small. †† I was rushed to the hospital via ambulance (I had delivered the baby but not the placenta) with my sweet child lying next to my leg. †I hemorrhaged terribly, requiring two blood transfusions. †They had to give me pitocin to deliver the placenta. †It had to come out to stop the bleeding, but I was not stable enough to undergo any sort of anesthesia for a D&C. †To make matters worse, my six year old daughter heard absolutely everything, saw me rushed from the house by paramedics, and knows that we lost the baby brother or sister she was so looking forward to having. †I don't know how to help her when I am barely coping myself. †Our entire family is grieving. †

Comments (5)

My heart is breaking just reading this right now. ¬†That was an incredibly traumatic experience you went through and I am sorry for the loss of your child. ¬†I am sorry you have to be in the that small percentage who don't have the good outcome. ¬†It's a terrible thing to endure but we are all here for you and I promise it gets better but it takes time. ¬†Today was my due date and visiting my son's grave was painful but nothing like it was five months ago. ¬†Please post any and everything you want and know that someone here has felt it and gone through it. ¬†Lots of hugs being sent your way today. ¬†Take good care of yourself please.

I'm so, so sorry for your loss. Your story is very similar to mine and I feel for you so much right now. I, too, woke up in labor in the middle of the night, and before I could do anything, I was involuntarily pushing and our son was born. It was very fast, confusing, and traumatic. My uterus clamped down after that and the bleeding stopped (luckily). I knew it was over so I got to spend some time alone with him before I did anything else and I really cherish that time. I did have to call the ambulance later though when my placenta came as, like you, there was a lot of bleeding. My husband was out of town so my children had to ride in the ambulance with me as we didn't have anyone near to help. They saw everything and they asked a lot of difficult questions. It was hard on them. This was three years ago and we are all doing a lot better now, but it was a long road. I am so sorry you're here. It's a terrible place.

So awful.¬† I am so sorry you are enduring this.¬† On top of losing your sweet baby, you are having to deal with all the trauma, too.¬† Mine was similar to yours, only I was already at the hospital when my water broke during an ultrasound.¬† So, we watched the baby slip from my uterus and then I had to deliver in the E.R.¬†You took good care of your baby.¬† These SCH's just really are awful.¬† ¬†

What you are feeling is completely understandable and normal.¬† It will take time to work through this all.¬†¬†Be¬†easy on yourself, and let the crying and grieving out.¬†

Take care, take it easy, and rest as you can.¬† Your body has just been through a lot, and all the hormones will be doing a crazy bit of work for a number of weeks.¬† Let us know if you have questions, just want to vent, or are wanting some understanding or support.¬†