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The violence of the last week has made me heartsick. The loss of life is completely unnecessary, and the polarization of our society depresses me and makes me sad. I'm also distressed because there are so many white apologists in my feed. So I'm going to try and express how I feel, with a little help from some writers I admire.

I’ve also seen some views that Black Lives Matter is the wrong phrase to
use, or it is divisive or non-inclusive. Usually, this sentiment comes
from white people, who seem to have a knee jerk reaction to BLM. But
here’s the thing: as white people, we don’t get to dictate to an oppressed minority how they go about achieving their liberation.
For too long, we have been the one’s standing in their way, the ones
telling them what they can or cannot do. So for us to stand up now and
say, “hey, we get what you are doing, but can you just say it a little
nicer?” is the epitome of racial arrogance and lack of self awareness....Just as white people didn’t need to be emancipated, we don’t need to
assert that our lives matter. We were never enslaved, and we were never
the victims of terrorism and hatred supported by the state based on the
color of our skin.

Here's the thing about why white apologists distress me so. No one in their right mind is suggesting that
killing the innocent (either by police or by private citizens) is an
appropriate response to these situations. NO ONE. So when white people proclaim that "all lives matter" in response to the BLM movement, whether they mean to or not, they're suggesting that black people do not have a unique experience in this country. Whether they mean to or not, they're suggesting that the black community has not endured generations of institutional racism, so if they were just higher quality people, they'd be able to "get their community squared away." Whether they mean to or not, they're suggesting that innocents killed by police officers somehow did something to deserve it other than "driving while black." Whether they mean to or not, they're suggesting that there isn't REALLY a problem with the police disproportionally killing black people, since, you know, ALL LIVES MATTER. In other words, the phrase "all lives matter" is racially charged language, like calling a full grown black man a "boy."

All of these unspoken interpretations lead to an us versus them mentality - a completely unnecessary one. People with the mental sophistication to be able to read and write can also understand that you can simultaneously deplore innocent black men being killed by white police and also deplore a gunman killing innocent police who are performing their duties. These are not mutually exclusive ideas, and much of the rhetoric I'm seeing implies that they are. THEY'RE NOT. "Picking sides" makes things infinitely worse, not better.

We do not live in a colorblind society. Each community has their own challenges and concerns, and it behooves us all to try and see things from the other person's point of view. Watch this clip, and if you're white, ask yourself the pertinent question and provide an honest response, at least to yourself:

Alternatively, if you don't come from a law enforcement family* or have personal experience with law enforcement, go on a ride-along and learn what it's like.

I don't criticize the BLM movement as an institutional effort not only because I think they have a legitimate complaint, but because their experience is not my experience. When
my son gets pulled over by the police and has done nothing more than
drive with a busted tail-light, my expectation is that he'll get a
citation, not a bullet to the chest. So it's not up to me to tell the
black community how to react to these events, as I lack both personal
and historical context to do so intelligently and with respect.

These issues are complicated. Really complicated, and emotionally charged, too. But there are solutions! Solutions that (ironically) the Dallas Police Department actually implemented and so reduced their excessive force complaints from 147 in 2009 to 13 in 2015. I wish all of us would spend just a little more time applying the reasonable person test, and admitting that these issues cannot be reduced to a single meme or soundbite.

About Me

I am a Hot Chick living in Castle Rock, CO with my fabulous family. We have a rescue dog named "Jackson," and she's a Basenji/Shepherd mix. She's something of a head case, but we love her. I'm a U.S. Navy vet, and I currently work as an Enterprise Solutions Architect, specializing in VoIP and multimedia contact center design. I'm a Trustee for my local library, because LIBRARIES. I care about science, the U.S. Constitution and the military. I'm a tax and spend liberal in a largely red county, but I try not to be stabby about it. I like to color, I aspire to run faster than I do, and I donate knitted cold weather gear to various charities. Stupidity, cupidity and wanton assholery piss me off, and I'm more than a little soft when it comes to dogs and those who serve others. I blog about whatever I feel like. I use foul language, so if that sort of thing offends you, feel free to fuck off now - if I'm unwilling to clean up my language for my fabulous Great Auntie Margie, I'm unlikely to do so for you. Newcomers are welcome here, especially those who disagree with me, but trolling and spamming will be met with the Shovel of Doom™.