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WEEKLY WANKER #023: JAMES ARTHUR

I have a confession to make. Sometimes I deliberately google image James Arthur. I’m far from a fan, he personifies everything I hate about men tbh. That whiny, ranty whiteboy with a chip on his shoulder and a neverending supply of entitlement shtick – a poor imitation of Professor Green’s poor imitation of Eminem’s poor imitation of actually decent rappers. He’s pathetic. But I find myself horrified and fascinated when I see him in photos or on the telly, because he is so unbelievably, painfully ugly that I can’t help but look. It’s the same kind of morbid fascination you get when you fall into a hole of watching manky videos of spot squeezing on youtube or when you find yourself hanging around for a bit at a police cordon to see what’s going on. But this is not the reason he’s this week’s Wanker in Chief.

LOOK AT HIM! LOOK! AT! HIM!

But naw, the reason James Arthur is Weekly Wanker #023 is because he’s a big fucking homophobe (with tiny tiny eyes). The age old homophobia excuse, which of course he’s come away with, is that it ‘doesn’t mean anything homophobic in the way he says it’. Nobody buys that when school children are calling everything ‘gay’ so we won’t be buying that there was no homophobia intended when James Arthur said in a recently released diss track “you probably want to put your stinky dick in me you fucking queer”. Sorry pal, I know you’ve got tiny eyes and all, but that really doesn’t affect your moral compass. You’re just a fucking wanker.

I’d like to note that there seems to be no big reaction to the racism in the track though? How the fuck is it alright for James Arthur to call Micky Worthless “Talibani”??????????????

^What even is that?

The good news is, this is in fact seriously negatively affecting the sales of his new album. iTunes are even offering refunds (which apparently they never do) to people who don’t want his pish music anymore now that they know he’s a bigoted dicksplash.

Slightly more disappointingly (for us) is how he’s handed over control of his twitter account to his management, who were presumably fearful that he’d dish out some more of his real opinions and lose them even more money. We do enjoy firing up the popcorn, kicking back and watching bigots throw their careers down the pan in spectacularly public fashion, so we’re kind of holding out hope he’ll wrestle back control and go out in a blaze of satisfying disgrace.

JESUS WEPT

He’s made it pretty clear what he really thinks of gay people, not just with his “stinky dick queer” slur (/fantasy?) but with his pathetic “I have a gay friend (and he’s positively flaming)” get out. There were also his text messages to X Factor contemporary Lucy Spraggan where he said that it was outrageous for her to bring up the high rates of suicide amongst LGBT teenagers subjected to homophobic slurs which she only cares about because she’s a “gay rights activist” (wut) and told her “real people don’t care about this”. Because gay people aren’t real people of course.

Sweet sweet straight cis male tears

It’s absolute bollocks that the X Factor are still going to have him promoting his new album on next week’s show – although whether we will be treated to him may hang in the balance since he’s finding it so “exhausting” being a bigoted prick. It’s not surprising that they plan to have him on despite his comments, given the show’s strong history of setting up gay contestants to be the comedy act every year and then having sourfaced Tory bastard Gary Barlow treat them with contempt every week. But it is absolute bollocks. Maybe instead of having another fucking charity single for fucking soldiers the show should supporting what probably makes up a significant proportion of their fanbase by promoting LGBT youth charities. Maybe a wee public James Arthur flogging too, since we’ve got all this popcorn going to waste? At the very least please god make him wear a bag over his head.

6 responses to “WEEKLY WANKER #023: JAMES ARTHUR”

Excellent article. Excoriatingly funny, truthful and honest. I wrote an article on my own thoughts (similar to your own). However, I admire your ability to articulate what I was feeling as a gay man, but couldn’t quite get across in my own article. Brilliant stuff.

I’m not sure what was more painful, listening to Arthur’s diss track, or listening to the Diss track by Micky Worthless, the one that started the whole feud. Mickey’s chorus goes “you suck Simon’s bell, and Louis’ as well (yes you do, you faggot)” Ugh… wtf. It’s bad enough that Arthur made the comment he did in the song, but the whole thing gave people a reason to google that shithead Micky Worthless too, and more ears to hear his hateful dribble,

sorry for my english its not my first language. the difference is he is in public.he rapped on Radio ugly to rita ora after that a rapper tweeted him he was not good. JA just send his sheeps to hatetweeting the rapper.it was really terrible. so the rapper decided to challange him to a battle. he always blame someone and deleate later his tweets and if his target just defense he send the sheeps. they are blind and silly. his sisters and mum are also on twitter. i call them the headsheeps. never seen this so organized. ist so hopeless. if you are his target you cant do nothing. they are to much.