Jerk-Off Artist? This Guy's Jerk-Off Royalty

Serial whack-off artist collared in Sweden

SÄVSJÖ,
Sweden –
In addition to having crazy, umlaut-rich place names and long, dark winters, Sweden is also
home to at least one serial whack-off artist.

According to The Local, a publication that bills itself as "Sweden's News in English," police in the
southern Swedish town of Sävsjö
responded to a woman's frantic call after she discovered a naked man
masturbating in a stairwell.

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After police arrested the man and placed him in
the back of their patrol car, they were shocked to find that man continued to
have at himself.

The ride back to the stationhouse in the nearby
town of Nässjö
took nearly 40 minutes, according to the Local,
and during that time, the man continued to pleasure himself.

After checking local records for similar cases,
the police discovered that the unidentified man was known to other
law enforcement agencies in the region for utilizing his joystick in area
churches and other public venues.

What we don't quite understand, and what the Local doesn't make clear, is why the
police didn't cuff the man's hands behind his back to restrict his ability to
masturbate.