(This post is suppose to be about cricket. But it’s not. I don’t know what it is.) (Also the analogies get pretty weird. You’ve been warned.)

You know how there’s always that one dude in a group of people that’s psychotic and bat-shit crazy but you love the shit out of him.

Well that person is Shahid Khan Afridi in the Pakistani Cricket team.

The man is a mad-man. There’s no logic in what he does and in some cases common sense eludes him, but what he does end up doing he does it with such beauty that he leaves you erotic for a couple of hours. That’s how awesome Afridi is.

If your wife was to run away with someone it wouldn’t be Afridi. In-fact Afridi would track the person who she did run away with and beat the shit out of him just for fun.

He might not even be that good a cricketer but when he’s in the “F*ck it” mood there’s no stopping the man. He eats white cricket balls to fulfill his calcium needs. (I’m not making this up. Seriously )

Afridi is the equivalent of masturbating. Hard, ferocious, short lived, rigorous, fast and explosive you enjoy every friggin moment of it. But when it’s all done you say to yourself

“Meh I shouldn’t have really gone through with this.”

or

“Why can’t I last longer?”

These are the same things I ask myself because after you see Afridi play once. You just keep coming back for more. You become like an abused boyfriend who’s girlfriend beats the crap out of him for fun but he keeps on coming back for more because she’s hot.

This is why I want us all to Save Afridi, no not because of my abusive hot girlfriend. (She is imaginary btw.) But because a World Cup without Afridi as captain, is like taking a shower without using shampoo or soap. (This makes no sense.)

If we don’t save Afridi. We’ll have Misbah as Captain. Seriously Misbah? Yes the man has a great ass and stuff but he just isn’t our Captain. I rest my case.