Just as pressing a question: If it took, what, a road flare taped to a freon tank to neutralize Sharknado 2, what could possibly tame an entire string of sharknadoes crawling a coastline?! We’re gonna need a gross of M-80s and some chewing gum, my inner MacGyver tells me.

Sharknado 2: The Second One this past July sucked 3.9 million total viewers into its vortex — making it Syfy’s most watched original movie ever — with 1.6 mil landing in the 18-49 demo, up 180 percent versus the original telepic.