Kimmy K has been dissing Paris H and we’re gonna tell teacher if she doesn’t stop it soon. Apparently Kim was in a club being all voluptuous and gorgeous when Paris walked in and asked the DJ to put her one and only hit Stars Are Blind on, because she’s modest like that.

But it all went a bit publicly arse upwards when she got jeered out of the joint (yep, we are a middle aged gangster, didn’t you know?): “Kim and her posse burst out laughing,” snitched a big gobshite. “Then Kim took the mic back and said, ‘Now let’s hear some real music.’ The crowd whooped and cheered but Paris stormed out, looking furious and close to tears.”

The reason Kim acted like the playground bully was because Paris once described her arse as “cottage cheese inside of a good trash bag”. We’re not laughing, we’ve got sonething stuck in our throat.