Manchester United Close To Relegation

Van Gaal’s Manchester United team suffered their first ever home loss on the first day of the Premier League season, leaving them teetering on the cliff edge of relegation with just thirty-seven more games to play.

Garry ‘Genius’ Monk’s visitors pushed and pulled the United formation about, passing and moving fluidly across the pitch, and scoring a goal either side of a spectacular Rooney bicycle kick from three and a half yards, to seal three points for the team.

Fantasy football managers who bought Gylfi Sigurðsson for the first week of the premier league will now be gladly relishing the 13 points and the early price increase of the Icelandic midfielder as others begin to shift the dead weight of the United midfield. Potentially a wise decision, as Van Gaal suggested his players were ‘smashed’, prompting wide spread speculation that cocktails at half time were not the maverick ideas everyone expected from the Dutch Master.

Siggy (6.0m) isn’t the only inexpensive player to bring back the bacon in this first decisive week. Chester (4.5m) in the Hull defence and Eric Dier in Tottenham’s defence (5.0m) have each scored more goals than QPR, Stoke and West Ham combined, and managed to keep a clean sheet in the process, whilst the Baggies’ Berahino (5.5m) is the leading goal scorer after netting twice in the draw against Sunderland.

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