Proof Your Breakup Is Making You A Better Person

Breakups, am I right? Just the absolute worst. The sudden tanking of self-confidence, the questioning of your entire relationship, and the wonderful, constantly nagging “what if” floating through your mind at the most inconvenient of times. Add to all this the fact that many young people today eschew the “traditional” relationship route and you’re stuck with a reality that’s basically “Yeah, Mike and I aren’t…together anymore? Well, not that we were ever ‘together,’ but, you know. It’s cool, it just hurts and sucks and who knows what might have happened. But, oh well, whatever.” Sorry, girl. You and Mike sounded totally cute.

But now you can push those “what ifs” out of your mind forever thanks to Dr. Gary Lewandowski, who recently did a TED talk about how the end of a relationship doesn’t mean it’s the end of life as you know it. In fact, it may be, like, the best thing ever.

As Lewandowski states, most good relationships are actually, you know,good relationships. One partner doesn’t hold the other back. And if you were in a relationship that failed, you probably were being held back in some compromising way to try and appease your man friend, or vice versa. True story time, kids: My friend Caroline once dated this guy who decided to pierce his own ear. Like, on his own. Full on “Parent Trap” style with a sewing needle. So anyway, she was seeing him and didn’t want the sex to stop so ,of course, she told him how great of an idea it was and how it “totally gave him a Captain Jack Sparrow vibe.” Now, once they stopped seeing each other she was forced to admit that he was, in fact and quite obviously, an idiot. She really couldn’t use words with more than three syllables while she was talking to him.

So breaking up with that IQ cesspool, while sad for Caroline in some way, was actually the best thing that could have happened to her. She got to rediscover her love for conversing with individuals who had a cumulative GPA of over 1.5. So the lesson here is: don’t mourn a relationship that doesn’t deserve it. If you weren’t actually being fulfilled by your man friend, then breaking it off was the best possible outcome.

My God, imagine having to wake up to that earring for the rest of your life. I can’t stop shuddering.