"A slow fastball-wielding pitcher wearing a Red Sox cap subjected fans to a months-long reign of terror at Fenway. Despite a Hall of Fame career, the fiend sidled onto the mound, threw crap for 5 innings, and was a total disaster. He calmly made off with millions of dollars and was last seen talking to Dave Duncan in the St Louis Cardinals bullpen. He'll start for them on Saturday."

"You see a Manny Ramirez, you see an A-Rod, you see Jeter ... Guys that I played against and with, these guys you’re talking about cannot compare.We didn’t have the baggy uniforms. We didn’t have the dreadlocks. It was a clean game, and now they’re setting a bad example for the young guys."

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Forget the hair comments -- the game was clean in the late 70s and early 80s??!?!?!?!??!?!??!?!??