This is what Men’s Rights activists would be doing, if they were goats

Last night, a helpful Twitterer pointed me to a news story from a couple of years back about a rather obstreperous goat who climbed onto a roof and wouldn’t get down — a bit like those Fathers 4 Justice protesters who like to dress up like superheroes and climb up buildings and bridges and even, last November, Buckingham Palace.

The goat’s aspirations were a tad more modest; he just climbed atop a one-story house. As the Mirror reported:

A routine patrol took an unexpected turn for police in Gresham, Oregon, when they spotted a goat stuck on a roof.

With the officers experienced in dealing with cut-throat criminals on a daily basis, they would have been expected to make light work of dealing with the runaway animal.

However, they were warned not to get any closer to the goat with anger issues as they attempted a rooftop rescue.

‘The goat will charge you,’ one neighbour told the officers during the incident last week.

Yep. Sounds a lot like an MRA.

Another told the perplexed Gresham police team that the ‘goat only respects one man’ and warned them to stay away.

Comments

Goats are infinitely better than MRAs and MGTOWs. They’re a lot more agreeable (under most circumstances, can’t say that one on the roof was particularly agreeable towards anyone but the respected owner-person.) just make sure to avoid wearing clothes with buttons.

Goats have a tendency to eat buttons. And anything else they happen upon that looks kinda edible or like it *might* be food. Or shiny.

The best kind are the ones that ‘faint’*.

*They don’t technically faint, it’s a genetic neuromuscular disorder in goats who are myotonic, causing their muscles to freeze up for 10-20 seconds when they experience feelings of panic. This ‘freezing up’ makes the goats fall over with all four legs extended out stiffly until the muscles relax and the goat can get up and go on its goat-way.

I wish I was a goat, then I could run wild in endless rolling hills, bleat to my hearts content, and never have the misfortune of making conversation with a MRA. *sigh* Maybe next year Santa will make my wish come true.

I’ve always been impressed by goats’ capacity for play. And for their ability to climb things that no human foot to get a purchase on. Sometimes I’m even impressed by their capacity to eat just about anything, short of actual rocks.

But MRAs, migtoes, and other manospheric morons? Well, the only thing about them that impresses me is their endless capacity for sexism. And teh stooooooopid. And not nearly in as pleasant a way as goats.

Gooooooats.

ETA: Heh, someone else posted another version of the same video. Fistbump!

When I read the roof-goat article, there was linked at the bottom a story about a man who spent five years trying to get a penis drawing recognized as his signature. This seems like something that MRAs and suchlike might be redirected into that would be more productive than their current activities.

I’m having quite a laugh at “I wouldn’t go on to private property with him” line. Looks like Roosh is still a fan of that “rape on private property” thing. So much for satire, huh?

I don’t understand what it is with straight dudes and thinking every gay man wants their butt, especially the super homophobic ones. Don’t fuckin’ flatter yourselves. Gay peeps want nothing to do with you, let alone get close enough to you to have sex with you.

Yes, Milo’s a self-hating gay man, but I would dare say that he has standards. Standards that include not sticking his giblets anywhere near your unwiped and unwashed butthole. (Sorry for the imagery, but I’m dying of laughter over here.)

I’m having quite a laugh at “I wouldn’t go on to private property with him” line. Looks like Roosh is still a fan of that “rape on private property” thing. So much for satire, huh?

Heh. Good ol’ Roosh…proving, once again, the axiom that homophobia is nothing more than straight men fearing that gay men will treat them the way they themselves treat women. Does Milo have to say “no homo, bro” before hugging him, I wonder?

When I read the roof-goat article, there was linked at the bottom a story about a man who spent five years trying to get a penis drawing recognized as his signature. This seems like something that MRAs and suchlike might be redirected into that would be more productive than their current activities.

Looks like my ex found a new hobby. Good for him.

@PI
I’m still too angry over the #JeSuisMilo thing to even word properly. FFS.

(Autocorrect changed that to #Jesus Milo. Add a comma in there and I wholeheartedly agree.)

I don’t understand what it is with straight dudes and thinking every gay man wants their butt, especially the super homophobic ones. Don’t fuckin’ flatter yourselves. Gay peeps want nothing to do with you, let alone get close enough to you to have sex with you.

Oh god yes, this. I think it’s because they look at women rapily, and so imagine that gay men are equally rapey towards men. I suspect that a significant chunk of homophobia exists because of that.

*Would totally run after goats trying to scare them so they ‘faint’….*

*Have actually done this. More than once.*

I go to seasonal petting zoos and sometimes the ones at county fairs here in SoCal, with ALL the quarters to empty the feed machines and for a few minutes I am “Queen of the herd”…then the food runs out and they all start trying to eat my clothing. I should call my mom and tell her I’m going to quit being a lawyer so I can move out to the country and raise a herd of goats instead. Last time I told her I was going to be an underwater welder, before that I was going to join the circus. Until she puts my dad on the phone it’s all in good fun. 😉

Elam may have had some antifeminist solidarity towards Roosh but it’s all gone by now. Very understandable, because

1) Roosh has been constantly ramping up his assholery, especially his racism and homophobia.

2) Roosh is now more famous than Elam, and never gave him respect back.

3) The MRM as a movement has been overshadowed by pick-up assholery, largely thanks to Roosh, while the mainstream media, predictably failing to make any fine distinctions, now uses the term MRA for any misogynist asshole.

It’s kind of an insult to goats to compare them to MRAs, dontcha think? The goat is however a good symbol of male ridiculousness and a symbol of virility, which led to the image of Baphomet, a goat-headed man with female breasts who became a symbol of ancient Caanan-based fertility cults.

Donate to the Mammoth!

We Hunted the Mammoth is an ad-free, reader-supported publication written and published by longtime journalist David Futrelle, who has been tracking, dissecting, and mocking the growing misogynistic backlash since 2010, exposing the hateful ideologies of Men’s Rights Activists, incels, alt-rightists and many others.

We depend on support from people like you. Please consider a donation or a monthly pledge by clicking below! there's no need for a PayPal account.

Send comments, questions, and tips for stories to me at dfutrelle@gmail.com, or by clicking here