Doug Barry

This would actually be an ingenious marketing scheme — that is, it would be ingenious if horses were people. It takes an exceptionally gentle horsie to not crack those delicate iPad screens with its hooves, and more cracked screens equals more cash money for Apple because, as well know, horses can't talk and so would never be able to take advantage of their generous warranties. Don't think about it too much — this is business, after all. Rumor has it that Apple may already be hard at work on a special edition version of the horsepad, but all they're saying about it is that the case is made entirely of diamonds and the screen is a gelatinous sheet composed of the congealed tears of manatees, so my best guess is that this strange new device is for unicorns.