''Whites'' is a low-key British comedy show set in the kitchen of a country house hotel.

Starring Alan Davies (sporting new facial hair) as an [[NoCelebritiesWereHarmed thinly-veiled parody]] of Marco Pierre White, the show aired in 2010 for one series. It was cancelled by Creator/TheBBC because of its high cost of production.

Now available on [[http://www.hulu.com/whites Hulu]].

----!!This show provides examples of:

* AccidentalPun: When Celia catches Roland spying on Caroline and Robin.-->'''Celia:''' Being a dick?-->'''Roland:''' What?-->'''Celia:''' You! Playing detective.* ArrogantKungFuGuy: PlayedForLaughs with the self-proclaimed kickboxer in Episode 3.* BabiesEverAfter: For Bib.* {{Backstory}}: The last episode provides some insight into Roland's past, explaining (but not excusing) his current outlook and lack of success.* BadBadActing: Roland and Skoose are extremely awkward during their TV appearance in Episode 5.* BeleagueredAssistant: Bib.* BelligerentSexualTension: Caroline mocks the fighting between Bib and Skoose by suggesting that they share this ([[GetARoom "Why don't you two just get naked and wrestle?"]]).* BewareTheNiceOnes: Bib can only take so much abuse from Roland and Skoose...* BilledAboveTheTitle: Alan Davies in the TitleSequence.* BribeBackfire: Roland attempts to bribe a health and safety inspector with a nice bottle of wine.* BrutalHonesty: Bib tells Roland exactly what he thinks of him before he leaves the hotel in the last episode.* CampStraight: To a minor degree, Caroline's boyfriend (and later fiancé), Robin. * {{Catchphrase}}: Roland invents some for his television appearance in Episode 5. Specifically, "bang it in," "don't tell your mum," and (when holding an egg) "eggy eggy eggy."* ChekhovsGun: In the second episode, Bib's comment about the "dead man's fingers" (crab gills). In the fourth episode, the Parkinson's disease charity wristband.* ChildrenInTow: A duck and ducklings crossing the road in Episode 3 lead to sudden braking and some unfortunate spillage.* CoolChair: Roland's smoke break chair looks like a throne, which is fitting given his high opinion of himself.* CorruptBureaucrat: In Episode 4, Roland expects a laid-back health and safety inspection from his regular guy, Colin. It turns out that Colin has been fired for accepting bribes. * CreatorCameo: Matt King, one of the show's writers, has a recurring role as Melvin.* DiggingYourselfDeeper: Roland, while sitting in the dining room with Alison.* DisabledMeansHelpless: Among other faux pas, Roland pre-cuts [[DisabledLoveInterest Alison]]'s steak for her when he learns she only has one arm. She isn't pleased. * {{Dismotivation}}: Roland has long since [[StoppedCaring stopped caring]] about his art and has fallen out of touch with current trends. He recycles old menus and, when harassed by Caroline to come up with a new one, grants Bib the "honour" of doing it for him. Most of his creative energy is instead devoted to fame-seeking.* TheDitz: Kiki.* DoubleMeaning: When the health and safety inspector informs Caroline that "Bob" has Parkinson's disease (see SnowballLie): -->'''Caroline:''' [''to Roland''] Parkinson's. Your brother. Wow, that is really, really, really [[WhatTheHellHero shitty]].* DrowningMySorrows: Caroline in Episode 6, after her fiancé ditches her to go help deliver piglets on his farm.* DrunkWithPower: In Episode 3, when Skoose is temporarily put in charge of the kitchen, he dons an [[NiceHat absurdly tall toque]] and starts hurling insults like Creator/GordonRamsay.* EdibleAmmunition: Celebrity chef Shay Marshall says he is "trying to figure out a way to make actual working bullets out of caramel, and then fire them directly into children's mouths."* EpunymousTitle: "Whites" refers to chefs' uniforms, but also acknowledges the main character's surname (and by extension the name of the restaurant).* HeadbuttOfLove: Bib gives one to Roland following their reconciliation in Episode 6.* HenpeckedHusband: Bib, who always sounds very meek when talking to his [[TheGhost unseen]] wife, Sarah. ** In Episode 5, when he is halfway home from the restaurant on his first vacation day in years, she makes him go back to the hotel to fetch his camera. ** In Episode 6, Bib says that he won't be taking an exciting job in Sydney after all because Sarah doesn't want their babies to have Australian accents. * HeterosexualLifePartners: Roland and Bib. This is made most explicit in the finale -- they even say "I love you" to each other before falling asleep on Roland's couch. * IHaveMyWays: Melvin seems to have some pretty shady methods of sourcing his meat.-->'''Roland:''' Where'd you get [poussin] on such short notice?-->'''Melvin:''' Probably best we don't have that conversation.* IndirectKiss: In Episode 6, Skoose plays Kiki's trumpet and they both point out that their spit is mixed together.* IsThisThingStillOn: The entire staff of the hotel overhears Bib and Roland's conversation (amplified via microphone) in Episode 6. When they realize this, they simply flee the scene.* ItsAllAboutMe: Roland thinks his happiness comes before everyone else's, and expects his subordinates to share this view.* JerkassHasAPoint: A variation -- Roland doesn't agree with Shay's opinion of the restaurant, but is forced to admit that it is technically true.-->'''Shay:''' Wow, look at this place. Right up your street, Roly... old school. [''wink'']-->'''Roland:''' Well, it's an old building.-->'''Caroline:''' And it did use to be a school.-->'''Roland:''' Yeah, it is ''an'' old school, but I wouldn't describe it as---->'''Shay:''' Right, I guess I should get checked in.* LandDownUnder: When it turns out that Bib won't be going to Australia after all, he and Roland agree that it's probably for the best, what with the [[EverythingTryingToKillYou swarms of murderous animals]] and baby-eating dingoes.* LieBackAndThinkOfEngland: Roland says this when Bib frets about giving a sperm sample.* LiteralMinded: Kiki.* LockedInAFreezer: Skoose locks Bib in the walk-in fridge at the end of the first episode.* ManipulativeBastard: Skoose. While not actually all that bright, he knows exactly how to push Bib's buttons when no one else is around, bringing him closer and closer to the breaking point.* MeetCute: Roland and Alison in Episode 3.* MistakenForRacist: While playing with gold leaf, Skoose mistakenly calls [[ClassicalMythology the Midas touch]] "the miner's touch." Bib corrects him and adds that "the miner's touch" doesn't even make sense, as miners would have black fingers, not gold ones. As a South Asian employee walks in, Skoose accuses Bib of thinking that only black people should work in mines.* NeverGotToSayGoodbye: PlayedForLaughs in Episode 6 -- Bib says goodbye to Caroline, but she is too embarrassed to say goodbye back because she has just inhaled a balloon's worth of [[HeliumSpeech helium]].* NoCelebritiesWereHarmed: Shay Marshall is clearly based on [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heston_Blumenthal Heston Blumenthal]], what with his three Michelin stars, modern dishes, and scientific cooking techniques.* NoPeripheralVision: Roland fails to notice a job applicant sitting in his office in Episode 6.* ObstructiveBureaucrat: Heather, the by-the-book health and safety inspector in Episode 4.* OneHeadTaller: Bib to Roland, which causes problems in Episode 5.* OnlySaneEmployee: Caroline. * OnTheNext* PhoneyCall: Roland does this in Episode 6 to make Bib think everything's fine without him. Bib calls him on it, since normally there is no cell phone reception in the basement.* PricelessMingVase: The huge piñata in Episode 6. * ProductDisplacement: The Porsche logo in Episode 3 is blurred out.* RageBreakingPoint: Bib hits it in Episode 5. While Skoose's insubordination and psychological warfare have taken their toll, the final straw ends up being Roland's jealous crushing of Bib's chance at a head chef job in Sydney.* RealMenEatMeat: Roland, in the first episode.* ResetButtonEnding: More or less. In the last episode, Roland realizes how much he needs Bib and apologizes for taking him for granted. As they drunkenly fall asleep in Roland's office, Roland says "You'll do breakfast tomorrow, yeah?" Roll credits.* ReunionRevenge: When an old rival books into the restaurant, Roland prepares [[TheFoodPoisoningIncident a special dish]] just for him. The revenge attempt backfires when Roland learns that his so-called rival [[RevengeBeforeReason actually wanted to help him out]]. He changes his mind after leaving the restaurant in an ambulance.* SenselessPhagia: The kickboxer investigates a [[ADateWithRosiePalms suspicious stain]] in the Porsche by touching it and licking his fingers.* ShirtlessScene: Shay in the second episode, much to Caroline's delight.* ShownTheirWork: The actors apparently spent two weeks working in a restaurant so as to confidently work with the food onscreen.* SmallNameBigEgo: Roland is convinced that he could be a bestselling author, convinced he could be a successful TV chef, and convinced his restaurant is heading for a Michelin Star. Bib knows otherwise.* SnowballLie: Roland's improvised attempt to have the restaurant's health and safety violations dismissed in Episode 4. Noticing the inspector's charity wristband, he makes up a story about his [[InventedIndividual younger brother]] "Bob" having Parkinson's. He uses a picture of himself and Bib to sell the story, but Bib walks in unexpectedly. Roland conveys to Bib that he needs to play along and [[ObfuscatingDisability pretend to have Parkinson's]]. It works, and even softens the inspector further. Then, as the inspector is about to leave, Caroline comes up to the three of them and makes some seemingly insensitive comments about Bib's shaking. When she realizes what's going on, Caroline is outraged but goes along with it, making this a rare case of such a lie ''not'' falling apart spectacularly in the context of a CringeComedy plotline -- the only consequence is that Caroline and Bib are both furious at Roland. * StandardSnippet: In the first episode, Roland hums ''In the Hall of the Mountain King'' (thinking it's ''The Sorcerer's Apprentice'') as a way of playfully indicating to Bib that he has hired an assistant for him.* TheStarScream: Skoose is rather unsubtle about his intentions to oust Bib as sous-chef.* SupremeChef: Shay Marshall, a very young, very successful chef. Bib worships him. * SurpassedTheTeacher: Shay used to be Roland's apprentice but is now much more successful than him. Roland hates him, but not just out of jealousy -- he once sabotaged Roland's shot at a Michelin star.* TakeThisJobAndShoveIt: Bib to Roland in Episode 5. * TellHimImNotSpeakingToHim: Caroline refuses to speak to Roland at the end of Episode 4, so he has to make conversation with Robin. * ThrowTheDogABone: The ending of Episode 5, when the Australian businessman is revealed to still be interested in Bib as a potential head chef.* TitleDrop: Roland tells Bib to get Skoose "a nice new set of whites" in the first episode.* TokenMinority: Axel.* UnresolvedSexualTension: Roland and Caroline.* VisualInnuendo: Roland simulates an erection with a cucumber when Bib brings up his fertility clinic appointment.* VomitIndiscretionShot: Shay (see ReunionRevenge).* WelcomeEpisode: Episode 1, for Scoose.* WillTheyOrWontThey: They don't. Caroline actually tries to initiate sex with Roland in Episode 6, but she's clearly just drunk and vulnerable, so he turns her away. ----