Things I Want: iPad Air and Plain Colored Ties

Some people ask, “do you really love the iPad that much?” And of course I always respond the same …if my house was on fire and I had 30-seconds to evacuate, I’d save, in this order, two of my three kids, my iPad, the third kid (time permitting), my wife, then my iPhone. You may think that sounds absurd and I’m obsessed with “things” and have no sense of values and what’s important, but truly …if everything else in the house was destroyed and all I had was the things on the list above, I’m pretty sure I’d be OK.

When the iPad was invented, I thought it was the greatest thing I’d ever seen. I promptly robbed my corner convenience store, mugged a few little old ladies in the parking lot of the grocery store on the corner, and saved (stole) enough money to buy one. I’ve never regretted a single thing – except perhaps not wearing ski mask during my crime spree.

An iPad is the greatest invention ever. It’s like the “future” arrived early and every day when I use it I marvel …who dreamed this up? Why didn’t I dream it up? It’s like a computer, and an eReader, and a phone, and a music collection, and it’s sturdy, doesn’t slow down or crash or get viruses, has a billion time-wasting games, looks beautiful, and can DO EVERYTHING.

It’s perfect. The original iPad was perfect, and if they’d never invented the iPad 2 or Ipad 3 or iPad Mini, I’d still be amazed and happy with the first iPad. Obviously, the newer, faster versions are just gawdy, but how do you improve on “perfect?”

Apple figured it out and made a faster, lighter, and thinner iPad. The iPad Air. I need it. “Need,” you ask? You might say this is a perfect opportunity to explain to my kids the difference between “want” and “need”, and you’re right …I’ve explained very clearly why I “need” the iPad Air. I mean, look at it (video below). It’s thinner than a pencil. Thinner than a pencil!!!

Our society is obsessed with thin, no?

Anyway, I guess this blog entry is nothing more than a lunatic ranting about a thing and has no point. And maybe secretly I’m hoping an Executive at Apple reads it and thinks, “I like this blogger’s moxy and passion. I think a great advertising and public relations move would be to give him a new iPad Air and organically his love for our company will help us sell thousands of these new iPads because he’s an opinion maker.”

Again, I’m a lunatic.

Lastly, before I show you how the iPad Air is thinner than a pencil, I think I’ve missed the boat on plain, solid color ties, but I think I need two or three colors to pair with my patterned shirts. I’ve been seeing that alot lately and I’m ready to jump on that trend and, a year from now, have a closet full of plain single-colored ties I won’t wear. Sort of like when I used to have 3 denim shirts, or royal blue dress shirts in the late 90s.

Let me know if you get the iPad Air so I can be appropriately envious and invite myself over to your house to hang out and use your new iPad.