Nothing is Real

If you are currently contemplating the events of the past year, lamenting the tragedies, wars and disasters which have befallen people all over the globe – don’t. None of them really happened. They were all staged by ‘them’. That’s right, everything you see in the media is faked, manufactured by those mysterious ‘powers that be’ in pursuit of their sinister and secretive agenda. At least, that’s what those crackpot conspiracy theorists I highlighted in an earlier editorial would have us all believe. According to them, 2014 wasn’t characterised by a growing conflict in Ukraine, disappearing airliners and ISIS beheadings in Syria and Iraq. All of them were faked. Which means, presumably, that nothing at all happened in 2014 – and probably nothing will happen again in 2015. Or will it? Because that’s the other side of these crackpots’ gibberings – that, in part, all these deceptions are designed to deflect attention from what’s really happening.

But let’s go back a couple of steps and look at these things which apparently never happened. Most recently, that business in Glasgow, where an out-of-control refuse lorry crashed into a group of Christmas shoppers, killing five of them, didn’t happen. What’s that I hear you protest? You’ve seen the news coverage, read the statements of grieving relatives and heard the words of condolence from the Mayor of Glasgow and Scotland’s First Minister. Damn it all – it was on the BBC, so it must be true. Ah, you poor deluded souls! One of our crackpots has thoroughly ‘analysed’ all the available data and concluded that it clearly didn’t happen, those people who died didn’t and, in fact, never existed in the first place. All of which is more than slightly offensive to those who died and their relatives. But as, obviously, none of them existed, this isn’t a consideration for the crackpot conspiracy theorists. Now, the interesting thing here is that this so-called ‘analysis’ is based, not upon first hand knowledge of the incident, or access to primary sources, but rather upon the photos published in the newspapers and the video footage which has appeared on the TV news. In other words, their judgement is based entirely upon incomplete secondary sources. Oh, that and the fact that one of victims’ relatives responded on Twitter far too fast – in this age of instant connectivity there’s no way that people can hear about events even before they are reported by the news media, you see.

These expert crackpots have applied the same level of detailed ‘analysis’ to those ISIS beheading videos to ‘prove’ that they are all faked as well. That’s why the authorities in the UK don’t want you seeing them, obviously. But it isn’t just stuffthat happened in 2014 that isn’t real. Oh no, the murder of that soldier in Woolwich the other year, for instance, that was faked. All those witnesses, the people who intervened: actors. The victim: never existed. How do the crackpots know he didn’t exist? Well, they can’t find any photos online of him with his army mates – that proves it, doesn’t it? Now, in the case of the Woolwich murder and the beheading videos, the cranks have a relatively coherent explanation for these alleged deceptions. Namely that they are attempts by the government – which is secretly in thrall to the global Jewish conspiracy – to stir up anti-Muslim felling in the UK. As I say, relatively coherent, but still utterly nonsensical. But when it comes to the Glasgow lorry crash, I’m afraid that I still don’t understand what ‘agenda’ faking such a thing could possibly advance. To be fair, perhaps the specific crackpot involved has offered an explanation, but I’m afraid that I simply don’t havethe stamina to read through all of his gibberings. But the fact remains that I can’t think of any good reason why anyone would fake such a thing, employing, as they would have to, hundreds of actors to pretend to be witnesses, relatives and so on.

To follow the crackpots’ ‘logic’ to its obvious conclusion, we have to ask whether those perpetrating these stories are actually real? How do we know they actually exist? Anybody can set up a website and start spouting this stuff, after all. The photos they use on their sites and social media: actors. Ultimately, we have to ask ourselves, who would benefit most from undermining the public’s faith in news media by spreading rumours that major news stories are faked? The establishment, obviously. If they can persuade the public that nothing they see or read in the news media is true, then they can easily deflect any criticism of themselves as being completely untrue. And when I say ‘the establishment’, I obviously mean that unholy coalition of multi national corporate and financial interests controlled by that 1% who own 90% of the world’s wealth. These supposed anti-establishment conspiracy theorists, their just corporate stooges trying to deflect our attention from what’s really going on by telling us that everything is faked!

But maybe it is all faked. Perhaps we’re all hardwired – Matrix-style – into some super computer created collective ‘reality’. Maybe nothing we think has happened to us actually has. Think on that as you see in the New Year, looking back on all those great things that happened in the last twelve months – none of it was real. And all those things you are looking forward to in the New Year – they won’t happen. Even you think they do happen, they didn’t. Or maybe the whole world is a film set and we’re unwitting actors in some soap opera being produced for the amusement of advanced extra-terrestials. That said, speaking personally, I think it all did happen – except in the warped minds of the crackpot conspiracy theorists, who are so deluded that they can’t see that they are doing the bidding of the very ‘establishment’ they claim to oppose. Beware these false prophets! In the coming year, whilst we really should question everything we’re told by the establishment, we also need to stay rooted in reality and not be diverted by the crackpots. Keep it sleazy!

Doc Sleaze

Related

About The Author

Publisher, Executive Editor and Chief Writer of The Sleaze, the Doc is in the forefront of the campaign to preserve historic 1970s moustaches, and is currently the owner of a fine 1970 Alain Delon, which he wears with pride every Thursday. Before founding The Sleaze, the Doc had the singular honour of being dismissed from the Ministry of Defence's Defence Intelligence Staff following his involvement with the original 'dodgy dossier', which sparked the civil war in the former Yugoslavia. Nevertheless, he stands by his controversial assessment that there is satellite imagery clearly showing Serbian leader Slobodan Milosevic enjoying a three-in-a-bed romp with Princess Margaret and Richard Branson. Following his dismissal, the Doc crossed the Atlantic to enter the film industry, where he quickly became Tawny Kitaen's pubic hair stylist. The proud possessor of the world's largest collection of pornography discovered in hedgerows, the Doc is considered one of Britain's leading experts on smut, and acted as an advisor to the BBC 4 series A Pornographic History of Britain. Now in his early middle years, Doc Sleaze lives quietly in Southern England where he is sometimes allowed to teach Government and Politics to local A-level students. He can be reached through the site's main e-mail address - just don't expect a reply.