AS USUAL WI’ A’ LOONS
THEY A’ GIT UP TAE SOME KINNA DIVILMENT, THIS TRUE STORY IS NAE
DIFFIRENT BUT THE CONSEQUENCES IF THEY HAD SUCCEDED DISNA BEAR THINKIN’
ABOOT. IT STARTED OFF FIN SOME LOONS BROKE INTAE A STORE AT THE QUARRY
AT THE BACK O’ THE SCHOOL, FAR DEAN TERRACE IS BUILT ON NOO. THEY
MANAGED TAE BREK THE LOCKS AND FIN THEY GOT INSIDE THEY DISCOVERED IT
WIS FULL OF DYNAMITE , GELIGNITE AND GUNPOODER. ALSO AVAILABLE WERE A
LARGE QUANTITY O’ DETONATORS. THEY HAD ALL BEEN USED FOR BLASTIN’ IN THE
QUARRY, BUT IT HAD BEEN CLOSED DOON FOR MONY YEARS AND OBVIOUSLY A’ THIS
BLASTIN’ GEAR HAD BEEN FORGOTTEN ABOOT. A DISCUSSION SEEN GOT UP ABOOT
FIT THEY WID DEE WITH IT A’ . IT DIDNA TAK LONG AFORE THEY AGREED THAT
THE BEST THING THEY QUID DEE WIS BLOW UP THE SCHOOL! FIT HEAVEN THEY
THOCHT NAE MAIR SCHOOL, THE SCHOOLBOYS ULTIMATE DREAM! THEY A’ AGREED
THAT IT WID TAK SOME PLANNIN’ AND WID NEED TAE BE DEEN FIN ABODY WIS OOT
O’ THE ROAD SO THEY WIDNA BE DISTURBED IN THEIR PURSUIT FOR THE ULTIMATE
FREEDOM. IN THE MEANTIME THEY WID KEEP QUIET ABOOT IT , SO THEY SHUT THE
DOOR AS BEST THEY QUID AND MADE THEIR WYE HAME. BEIN’ LOONS SOME O’ THEM
QUIDNA RESIST THE TEMPTATION AND HELPED THEMSELVES TAE SOME DETONATORS.

SKIRLIE WIS SITTIN AT THE FIRESIDE O’ PAULA’S NEW COONCIL, HOOSE THEY
HAD JIST MOVED IN THE WEEK AFORE AND HE HAD GONE UP TAE SEE FIT LIKE IT
WAS. A ROARIN FIRE WIS GAUN IN THE FIREPLACE AND HE WIS QUITE CONTENT
SITTIN’ AND SMOKIN’ HIS PIPE O’ BOGEY ROLL.HIS TWA FEET WIDNA HAVE
TOUCHED THE GRUN NOOADAYS WI A’ THIS ANTI SMOKIN’ IN PUBLIC PLACES AND
HOOSES. ONYWYE THE DOOR OPENED AND IN CAM HIS GRANDSON IAN OR BETTER
KENT TAE HIS PALS AS KINKO, AYE, AYE GRANDA HOO YE DOOIN’, FINE HE
REPLIED GIEN ANITHER SOOK AT HIS PIPE AND REMARKIN’ HOO GRAN’ A
FIREPLACE IT WIS A’ THE BONNIE TILES ROON ABOOT IT. HE DIDNA SEE KINKO
PITTIN’ HIS HAUN INTAE HIS POOCHES AND TAKIN’ A DETONATOR OOT HE THREW
IT INTAE THE FIRE AND TOOK TAE HIS HEELS. IT DIDNA TAK LONG AFORE THERE
WIS AN ALMICHTY BANG AND THE NEW GRATE LANDED IN THE MIDDLE O’ THE FLOOR
IN BITS. SKIRLIE’S PIPE DROPPIT OOT O’ HIS MOO IN ASTONISHMENT AND HE
QUID HARDLY SPEAK FIN CONNIE, PAULA’S WIFE CAM RUNNIN’ IN FAE THE
KITCHEN FIT HAVE YE DEEN SHE CRIED OOT FIN SHE SAW THE MESS AND THE
GRATE LYIN ON THE FLOOR I HIVNA DEEN NITHIN’ AND HE EXPLAINED TAE HER
ABOOT THE BANG, ON HEARIN’ THIS SHE QUICKLY CAM TAE THE CONCLUSION THAT
IT WIS THE COALMANS FAULT FOR GEEIN’ HER A BAD LOAD O’ COAL. MEANTIME
KINKO KEPT WEEL OOT O’ THE WYE INCASE O’ ONY REPERCUSSIONS IF THE TRUTH
CAM OOT.

NEXT DAY THE LOONS A’ GOT THE GITHER, HAULIN’ OOT THE DYNAMITE AND
GUNPOODER THEY MADE THEIR WYE UP TAE THE SCHOOL AND PROCEEDED TAE FILL
A’ THE VENTILATORS AND ONY NOOKS AND CRANNIES THEY QUID FIND. AN EXTRA
SPECIAL LOAD WIS PUT INTAE BROONS THE SCIENCE TEACHERS CLASS BECAUSE
NABODY LIKIT HIM. THEY HIDNA ONY IDEA HOO TAE SET IT OFF APERT FAE FIT
THEY HAD SEEN IN COMICS AND PICTURES O’ GUY FAWKES AND HIS CRONIES TRYIN’
TAE BLOW UP THE HOOSES O’ PARLIAMENT. EFTER FILLIN THE VENTS THEY LAID
OOT TRAILS O’ GUNPOODER LEADIN’ UP TAE THE DYNAMITE AND FIN THEY WERE
READY THEY TRIED TAE LICHT IT WI’ MATCHES, BUT EFTER LYIN’ SO LONG IT
WIS DAMP AND WIDNA LICHT, WHICH WIS A GOOD JOB FOR THEM AND HALF O’ THE
TOON AS WEEL AS THEY HAD USED THAT MUCH IT WID HAVE BLOWN UP THEM AND
ATHING ROON ABOOT AS WEEL.HOO IT WIS FOUND OOT ABOOT I DINNA KEN BUT
THERE IS NAE DOOT ABOOT IT THEY WID HAVE BEEN IVERY SCHOOLBOYS HERO IF
THEY HAD SUCCEEDED.

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