Because people love a good freak show, a Central Asian Tortoise born with two heads, six legs, two hearts, and one intestine and butthole recently went on display at the National Museum of Natural History in Kiev, Ukraine. Now I know what you're thinking: "Enough with the Ninja Turtle jokes, GW -- it's a tortoise, not a turtle!" And that, dear reader, is why you and I can never be friends. "Because you don't like being corrected?" I've killed people for less. "Please -- you couldn't hurt a fly!" I...try to shoo them out the window with a newspaper. :/

Hit the jump for a video of Raphatello trying to walk in two directions at once.