“This girl is Kosher. That means I have to put my meat in one hole, and my milk in the other.” Rafi was on the season finale of The League last night, and before he converted to Judaism so he could have sex with Lizzy Caplan, he cut the tip of his penis off with a paper cutter. Why aren’t you watching this show? (Uproxx)

I used to make it a point to read all the National Book Award winners for fiction every year, and then I had kids. Now I read grocery labels to ferret out food with high fructose corn syrup, but those of you who still have a life — and by that, I mean, you spend it reading — should check out this year’s “predictable” winners. (Vulture)

POINT: Here’s why Glenn and Maggie have the best relationship on TV. (OMG)

COUNTERPOINT: That title actually belongs to Burt and Virginia on Raising Hope — Me

I read in a comment somewhere on the site in a Catching Fire premiere post that Jennifer Lawrence should take more fashion tips from Elizabeth Banks. Uh, not so fast. (GFY)

“I’m making him sound like a rapist,” is probably not a line in a story about Harrison Ford that you’d expect to read. (Celebitchy)

Some guy from some boy band that people in their late 20s were probably obsessed with at some point is filing for bankruptcy because those people in their late 20s are no longer teenagers. I guess. Honestly, I have no idea who this guy is, not because I’m cool, but because I listened to a lot of Toad the Wet Sprocket. (And still do!) (Dlisted)

In high school, as a prank, I told my best friend at the time that I’d broken up with my girlfriend, not expecting that his reaction would be to clap, celebrate, and cheer, which my then girlfriend saw and cried about for days. Pretty bad, huh? Well, it’s not as bad as pranking your girlfriend by telling her on your anniversary that you cheated on her, only to elicit from her a confession that she cheated. The prankster gets pranked! (Videogum)