My motivation to write an article on the dichotomous relationship between love and pain lies heavily on the most common complaint I hear from couples I coach outside of the BDSM world. The most common complaint I hear is that most of my clients experience an inability to connect with friends, family, or lovers – sometimes even pets. It presents as an inability to connect, to be vulnerable, and to experience empathy. I’m not talking about superficial connection that revolves around pleasantries, and I’m not talking about not being able to do activities with others. What I’m talking about is the connection that is often called “intimacy,” the connection that makes us feel safe, can make us feel comfortable sharing our bodies with others, and the connection that is a result of feeling seen, heard, and respected in our experiences. Continue reading THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN PAIN AND LOVE→

Hey guys! Just a post to let you know that your Denver BDSM coach is having a birthday in June! You all know how much I love to be active, and so this year I’m asking for donations for a new bike! Of course, you can always check my wishlist for other gifts I desire.

So, here’s the beauty I want. I don’t need any accessories. Email me to inquire about how to send donations! Please do not purchase the bike because chances are, I’ll end up with more than one.

Today I am going to write about sex and desire and how it pertains to relationships, control, and self-esteem. Let me start by clarifying my definition of sex. To me, sex is: Continue reading SEX & DESIRE – PART I→

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Submission is a gift. Submission is not something that Dommes are entitled to, and it is not something to be taken with force (unless of course there has been negotiation in regards to a role-play beforehand).

Since I have recently added distance domination to my list of kinks and services that I offer, I wanted to show you all what distance domination via email looks like. This person is paying me $100 for 4-5 emails of any type, to be kept to a limit of two paragraphs each coming from him.

I have a client, we’ll call him Ron, who I’ve known for a few years now. Ron and I have developed a loose friendship outside of our professional relationship -a friendship that consists of Continue reading IT’S OK TO PAY→