Thoughts Media Sites

Category: Funny

Geocities is no more, but as I was scanning and archiving a really great Wired article (scanning a bunch of images to a PDF file is slick!), I came across a PDF file I made back in 2001, eight whole years ago…it was pulled together from a site, hosted on Geocities, that was one of the most hilarious prank/hoax sites I’ve ever seen. It’s so well done that when I first saw it I thought it was all real. It looks like I’m not the only one wanting to make sure this great site doesn’t fade from memory, but I figure I’ll post this entry anyway just for fun… 😉

If you’ve never played an MMORPG (Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Game), you won’t find this video as funny as I do, but if you have any background in online gaming, you’ll appreciate the clever lyrics. And if you’ve never checked out The Guild, you should – it’s absolutely hilarious!

“Below we present a selection of some of the most bizarre adverts, requests and personals listed on the site – from the elderly woman looking for a lodger to live in her bathroom, to the man selling 1,300 Pope hats. While some were undoubtedly posted as pranks, they still reflect the spirit of a website that proudly keeps itself open to all internet life.”

The past month, I’ve been on the hunt for a new Web host for a few personal domains. I have an account with 1&1, but they have a limitation on how long CNAME entries can be, so I need to look elsewhere. I signed up with BlueHost, only to discover their horribly limited control panel software didn’t do what I needed, so after three days I cancelled my account. Next I tried WestHost, quizzing their pre-sales people on exactly what I needed before signing up. They said they could do what I needed, so I signed up. Again, they had horrible control panel software that didn’t do what I needed it to do – the pre-sales people either didn’t understand my questions, or they weren’t being honest with me. So I cancelled my account with WestHost. It’s frustrating to waste time with this, but I’m thankful that both BlueHost and WestHost have simple cancellation policies and I got a full refund.

So I went on the hunt for other Web hosts, this time for ones that had better control panels. I’m not looking for “cheap” – I’d happily pay $10 to $15 a month for the account – but what I need is something powerful and flexible and based around the concept of multiple domains. I was looking at JustHost.com, and decided to sign up with them because they use Cpanel, which I’ve used on my own server before. I was going through the sign-up process, and on the second phase it asked me about adding upgrades to the account. One of them for for SPAM Assassin. I was a bit confused, because SPAM Assassin is free software that virtually every Web host out there uses. And JustHost wanted to charge me $19.95 for it:

In another browser tab I looked at the list of features, and sure enough, SPAM Assassin was listed:

So which was it? When I was clicking around the JustHost site a chat window popped up, so I thought I might as well ask them about this. Here’s the transcript of that chat:

* * * * * * * *

Connecting to Agent…

You have been connected to Amber

Amber Says:Hey Wait! We would hate to see you go without seeing what’s made us Award Winning Web Hosts. So just this once I can give you a 20% discount on our unlimited hosting. That’s a $24 saving! To take advantage of this one-time offer just CLICK HERE

Amber Says:When you are ready just say “Hi” and we can get started….

You:Hi there, I have a question

Amber Says:Hi my name is Amber thanks for visiting Just Host today!

Amber Says:Is there anything I can help you with? Or if you would like to check out our last minute 20% discount, please CLICK HERE!

You:I’m in the midst of signing up now, and I’m confused about something….

Amber Says:Signing up for hosting with Justhost couldn’t be easier! If you want to sign up now just CLICK HERE and complete our simple 1 page order form!

You:on the Features page, it lists Spam Assassin and there’s a check mark next to it, seeming to indicate that it’s included in the package

Amber Says:Unfortunately we cannot accept checks or money orders. We only accept Visa, MasterCard, American Express, and Paypal

You:Yet as part of my sign up package I’m being offered Spam Assassin for $19.95/year….

Amber Says:You get a free domain for life, free instant setup and you can host unlimited domains, plus, much much more.

Amber Says:Today only I can offer you this special 20% discount so you can sign up for just $3.95 month. Just CLICK HERE to get this today only offer!

You:are you reading what I’m writing? I’m asking you a question

Amber Says:Please repeat your question

You:You don’t have a scroll bar?

Amber Says:Would you like to sign up for our most popular hosting plan for just $3.95 / month?

You:No, I’m asking a question. Let me repeat it…

Amber Says:Ok Great!! To sign up for the $3.95 a month offer CLICK HERE

When I was watching Tin Man (a pretty cool show I might add) I saw a commercial for So You Think You Can Dance Canada, and because I’m a sucker for those types of commercials, I didn’t skip past it. I raised an eyebrow when they said “It’s gonna’ be bucc Canada” – I’ve never heard the word “bucc” in my life. I decided to look at up Urban Dictionary, and got a laugh when I saw the top definition:

When I first looked at that sign, I thought it said “Ecoli”, which is of course a horrible name for a store. I find that this happens to be fairly often – I’ll glance at a sign and before my eyes can finish reading the letters, my brain flashes an interpretation into existence…and it’s often wrong, with comical results. Does this happen to anyone else?