1 - Fedor signed to the UFC, after the collapse of M-1 Global (they pissed Putin and got sent to Chechnya)

2 - Gomi thrashes KenFlo and we get to see Florian cry in a Joe Steveson moment

3 - Big Nog cuts the Velasquez hype on the 2nd round by KO; Mir cuts Brock to size and then fights Big Bog in a total war...Big Nog proves the Pride product is the best and chokes out Mir. Fedor is in the arena and smiles and eats icecream...a pretty japanese woman announcer cries in anticipation for the future beatdown

4 - Shogun survives a 4th round Haddoken by Machida and counters with a TigerKnee, ending the feud in 2D.

5 - Three times is the charm and BJ Penn finally chokes out GSP, after three rounds of beatdown...he runs out of the octagon, never to be seen again. He's now the stuff of mma legends.

I like all of yours except number 5, which is less likely to happen then the 2012 doomsday. Even if BJ did choke him out he wouldn't dissapear, he'd stick around reminding everyone that he choked out GSP, despite a his cornerman sensually applying liberal amounts of vaseline to his neck.

I've also decided that I want BJ to beat a contender or two at welterweight, be GSP's last fight before moving up to middleweight permanently, and BJ RNCs him in the 4th or 5th to retire the first man to actively hold UFC titles in two weightclasses with his White Whale mounted securely on the wall of his den.