A FUnnie look at the loony residents of the Democratic Underground aka DUmmies in particular and the Leftwing Blogosphere in general.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Escape Wisconsin: Senators flee, teachers flu

I've spent a lot of time in Wisconsin. Growing up in Chicago, we always thought of Wisconsin as Chicago's summer resort, which it is. And even though I now live in St. Louis, my family still goes up to Door County, Wisconsin, for an annual week of vacation. The land of cheese, bratwurst, beer, and natural air conditioning is so popular as a vacation spot, Illinois' neighbor to the north even has a tourism bumper-sticker campaign with the slogan, "Escape to Wisconsin."

Well, some Wisconsin state senators have changed that slogan to "Escape Wisconsin"! Fourteen Democrat senators have fled south to Illinois in order to avoid voting--kinda what they were elected to do, as I recall. They packed their toiletries, baked their bratwurst buns in haste, and made their exodus so as not to have to vote on a bill they didn't like and to keep the Rethugs from having a quorum.

You see, Rethug Governor Scott Walker (aka Walker, Taxes Stranger) is trying to do the taxpayers a favor by cutting the budget. To do that, he expects well-paid public employee union members to feel a little of the pinch that the rest of us are feeling.

WELL, this is ANATHEMA to the libs! When you combine Big Government with Big Labor, you're going to get a Big Stink! So LOTS of protesters this past week! Teachers are calling in "sick" to join the Million Marxist Marathon in Madison. Some sympatico doctors are even writing excuse notes for them!

And the DUmmies are there in spirit, if not out of their basements. This is a big "Solidarity" cause DU jour for the DUmmies. Romantic notions of Joe Hill and the Wobblies dance through their nostalgic noggins.

Dozens of Wisconsin-themed threads to choose from these last days. We'll go with this THREAD, "Democratic Senators Walk Out As Protests Begin," and this THREAD, "Group of doctors here signing notes for absent teachers- this is what solidarity looks like," as well as a few posts from other threads besides.

So let us now "Escape to Wisconsin," where the DUmmie remarx are in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, wondering if a Wisconsin Badger could beat a Li'l Beaver, is in the [brackets]:

Democratic Senators Walk Out As Protests Begin

[The Walker Walkout.]

Would that prevent a quorum from forming?

[Would that prevent a forum from quarreling?]

suppose Willy Nelson will send these guys T-shirts,bandannas, and a case of whiskey like he did the Texas dems?

[Whiskey-onsin Dems can get all weed-weed up.]

it doesn't do anything as far as results go. It does show solidarity, though.

[It does show stupidity, though.]

I called congressmen Hoyer's, congressman Weiner's offices and e-mailed the president and asked why are they not supporting the unions. I told the president he should be on a plane to Wis and support the unions.

["Bill Daley, get Air Force One ready on the tarmac NOW! DUmmie southernyankeebelle just sent me an e-mail, and I've got to get to Wisconsin PRONTO!"]

This is the line in the sand.

[This is some loons in the snow.]

Time to get hungry for a general strike

[Bring down The MAN! Speak truth to POWER!! Workers of the World, UNITE!!!]

I've heard Walker has language in the bill to do away with BadgerCare

[If he gets rid of BeaverCare, even DUmmie FUnnies will hit the streets!]

A source tells NBC15 News that all 14 members of the State Senate are meeting at an out-of-state location to avoid the Senate reaching quorum. The reason they have left the state is because the Senate has the power to issue a Call of The House, which would send the Wisconsin State Patrol to bring absent Senators in.

[Escape to Illinois!]

I have this incredible urge to go to Rockford. I wanna hang out with the cool kids.

[The Rockford-philes.]

Makes my patriotic little liberal heart proud.

[To see people not doing their job.]

This is only the begining...ending all entitlements is their end game, as well as reducing government by getting rid of the Dept's of Education and Energy.

[Sweet!]

Want to make a stand. Stop buying anything for 1 day.

[Not One D*mn Bratwurst!]

The Flee-a-buster must continue

[The Flee Circus.]

Scott Walker Limerick:

Scott Walker cannot any longer a recall resistAnd the governorship can no longer be possessedTho once a good fellowAlready he is the devilNow his head is spinning as we call the exorcist

And another:

Scott Walker started a feeding frenzywhen he let the rich raid the state treasury"Take all you pleaseit's like government cheeseGod blesses you as we starve the beastly"

[This limerick-writing repeaterIs such a poetical cheater:He won't take the timeTo make his lines rhymeAnd disregards rhythm and meter!]

Defiant Wisconsin Democrats Say Running Away Is Democracy, Too.

[AWOL LOL!]

Walker should be recalled or horse whipped.

[Well, make up your mind!]

My allegience is to political power, not process. The important thing is to smash one's enemy and to effectively wield political power, not uphold some ludicrous notion of "fairness."

[Thank you, Marxiavelli.]

Wisconsin senators living day-to-day south of border

[I'm picturing these fourteen state senators on the run, hiding out in barns in northern Illinois, sneaking pies off a farm wife's window ledge.]

Some senators left Wisconsin with little more than the clothes on their backs. Others came to Illinois equipped with an Urban Essentials pack. . . .

the 14 Wisconsin Democrats have gone into survival mode in Illinois, doing small loads of laundry and eating "whatever we can get our hands on."

[But think of poor Mrs. Schmidlap, with no cherry pie for her family!]

Doing their own LAUNDRY? They must truly be suffering! How dreadful.

[These valiant souls have to rub snow on the streaks in their underwear and then beat them on the rocks. Such are the hardships of these Heroes of Democracy. Although I understand there's now an "Underwear Railroad," secretly shipping boxes of Tide to an undisclosed location outside DeKalb.]

Group of doctors here signing notes for absent teachers- this is what solidarity looks like

[This is what DUplicity looks like.]

Please excuse _____ ______ from school today, he/she has a severe case of Walker Syndrome.

[Dr. Note.]

I am bursting with cheesy pride that the world is seeing what I have been lucky to know my whole life.

[Doctors and teachers with no compunctions about lying! Ain't it grand?]

Solidarity looks like two professionals getting together to perpetrate a lie? Who knew?

21 Comments:

Anonymous said...

These losers just reminded me why I write a check for $8,500 every year to the Montessori Academy. If that is what I need to pay to keep liars and fraudsters (and increasingly, child molesters) away from my child, so be it. Plus I don't want my son to be taught by the bottom 10% of college graduates. School of Ed grads...not the sharpest knives in the drawer.

"Scott Walker (aka Walker, Taxes Stranger) is trying to do the taxpayers a favor by cutting the budget." PJinc

Taxes Stranger?...whatever.

Has it dawned on any of you that you might be on the wrong side of this issue?

Nope.

Maybe one of you, or two, could look into the tax cuts Walker made within days after taking office. I know you can do it. Note the amount of state revenue that disappeared. While you're at it, also take note of the fact that Wisconsin was operating a surplus until DAYS after Walker took over.

The money given up to Wisconsin's wealthy apparently must be paid back by Wisconsin's teachers, firemen, police, janitors, maintenance workers, landscapers, etc. The filthy rich public employees can afford the sacrifice. And while we're at it, let's bust their union too...and sell state assets (power plants, land) at no-bid rock-bottom prices in the spirit of privatization.

This is what the people in Wisconsin are unhappy about. Wouldn't you be?

One noticeable glaring difference with these fed union protests...there is absolutely no public support for them. No honking of motorists passing by or joining in. All of us living and working in the real world of unsubsidized entrepreneurship don't give a flying fuck about fed unions. You're on your own. And that's how you'll die.

Private sector unions, genius. In simple terms, I don't pay Beck's salary, health care, or pension. There is a reason FDR opposed government unions, in case you were curious.

Oh, by the way smart guy, I did look into the tax cuts that Walker promised...they don't take effect until July. Your funny math style is no match for my superior reading style. In fact, didn't Politifact bust Maddow for making the same claim? Wait for it, wait for it...

So what is it you do, watch MSNBC all night, then go repeat what you heard to anyone with an internet connection? Isn't that what you say about FNC viewers? There was no surplus, the previous DEMOCRAT governor raided a patient compensation fund (nice)to the tune of $200 million and Wisconsin has been court ordered to pay it back. Your boy Maddow failed to read the memo (s)he was attempting to use as evidence, the fine print, if you will. The memo outlined at least $258 million in unpaid bills that are due this year. Unlike DC, Wisconsin can't print money to pay the bills.

To paraphrase you, Troglaman: "Has it dawned on you that you might be on the wrong side of this issue?"

Even some DUmmies are starting to catch on. It's hard to be empathetic to a bunch of government workers with cushy medical plans and pensions who are demanding the little people who have none of those things, fork out more tax dollars so Gov employees won't have to be "burdened" by contributing to their own benefits.

We're all eating top ramen and trying to hang onto our homes while these oppressed members of the public unions are complaining because they might have to contribute more towards their own pension plans and health insurance. You know where my pension plan went?? Down the drain in my 401K, but hey, maybe if I give up toilet paper I can afford the higher taxes it's going to take for you to keep that fancy pension plan you feel entitled to not have to contribute to?

Cheer up, people! Look what happened in Texas since their Dems tried fleeing to New Mexico to avoid doing their elected duties: Republicans have gained seats in Texas every election since then, now having a supermajority in both houses of the state legislature. This tactic pretty much signed the Commucrat Party's death warrant in Texas. Buwahahahaha!

2:27 AM"Troggy, in case you are too stupid to have noticed the many replies shooting down your idiotic point, here it is again:They all belong to a PRIVATE union, not financed by our tax dollars! The teachers in Wisconsin throwing temper tantrums, in contrast, belong to PUBLIC unions that ARE financed by our tax dollars! Hence, there's a difference."This is what the people in Wisconsin are unhappy about."No, the people in Wisconsin are unhappy because their children are being deprived of an education because the lazy, selfish slugs in the teachers' unions whose salaries their taxes pay are more interested in throwing their temper tantrums to get even more taxpayer money thrown at them than they are in doing their civic duty and teaching the students that were entrusted to them.

::: watching as Troglaman The Guttersnipe goes on another hate-fueled blind howling mad dog rage over reality grinding away at his fantasy universe and repeatedly and angrily power-slams his head squarely and viciously up his ass :::

It's interesting to watch people on this blog try to speak logic to Guttersnipe who is mentally incapable of understanding it and too morally corrupt to deal with if he could understand it.

Are you calling Wal-Mart and demanding their employees take a cut in pay? You're paying their wages. Are you calling your bank and demanding a cut in their bonuses? You're paying billions for them. Are you calling the Department of Defense and asking just exactly what's happening with the majority of your tax money? A trillion a year (that doesn't include the wars).

No, you hypocritical gasbag, you're bitching about the enormous economic black-hole created by the greedy, fat and diabolically well oiled public employees of Wisconsin.

Here's a little homework for you dumbshit...compare the economic drain of Wisconsin's public employees with the just two of America's subsidized industries, oil and tobacco. Carefully examine the profits of the Wisconsin employees compared to the profits of oil and tobacco.

"No, you hypocritical gasbag, you're bitching about the enormous economic black-hole created by the greedy, fat and diabolically well oiled public employees of Wisconsin." - - - Troglaman the Guttersnipe

That's the only part of your hate-filled rant you got right, Guttersnipe. And those greedy public employee unions have to be stripped of their ability to screw their employers - the taxpayers - blind. And they WILL lose. The voters put in people to put a stop to the robbery and that will happen. It will also happen in Ohio and elsewhere. If it doesn't, you'll see economic chaos that will make the Great Depression look like a walk in the park.

You're far too stupid to comprehend all that, Guttersnipe; the latest emission from your latest round of power-slamming your head repeatedly up your ass proves it. I'm looking forward to see what the terror of reality does to you when the public sector unions get put in their place. I'm betting your head will explode if you don't power-slam it up your ass fast enough.

"That makes your stupid "They're paid with our taxes" argument irrelevant because EVERYTHING is paid with your dollars."Again, the Private sector unions such as the one Rush belongs to aren't paid for with our tax dollars, hence the difference and hence why your attempted comparison falls flat."Then you undoubtedly think Wisconsin's public employees present the larger economic drain and economic threat (I know how you stupid fuckers think)."I never said anything of the sort, and you know it. You love deliberately avoiding or twisting my arguments because you know you can't refute them.The point I was making regarding the fact that our tax dollars pay them is that this fact means they are obligated to do their jobs for us. See, when someone pays someone else to do a job, the payer in question expects the worker to do that job and thus earn the money. Our tax dollars pay those union teachers to do their jobs and teach our children, and American parents thus expect them to do that job. These Wisconsin union teachers are deliberately abdicating that responsibility to us and our children so they can throw their temper tantrums, thus depriving many of Wisconsin's children of an education, at least temporarily, and thus making good people all over Wisconsin pissed at them.

"Again, the Private sector unions such as the one Rush belongs to aren't paid for with our tax dollars". adam

Then where do their funds come from? Advertising? Where does advertising get it's money? Corporations and businesses that sell products? Who do they sell their products too? That'd be you and me, dumbass. Our dollars are paying for Rush's bullshit and his union.

"Then where do their funds come from?"Mainly from private donations. As for your convoluted comment about how we're paying the political pundits' salaries by purchasing products that are advertised on their shows, you are conveniently enough forgetting one very important fact: We do not HAVE TO buy those products, we do so of our own free will (And btw, many of those are products that people already buy anyway and the fact that it is done simply through purchasing products by companies which pay advertising fees to pundits whom many of the products' consumers don't even watch or listen to means that it is only VERY indirectly that we fund them, so the fact that some of it goes to fund political pundits and their private unions is a moot point). In contrast, the teachers' salaries and their unions are directly funded by our tax dollars, which we DO have to pay and have no say in the matter. In other words, we are not required by law to fund the private broadcaster's unions, but we ARE required by law to fund public sector unions such as the teacher's unions through our tax dollars.

"This isn't true, and the christian guy mentions the lie. How frickin typical."Oh, so you think that Wisconsin parents are HAPPY that their kids are being deprived of an education because the union teachers whose salaries the parents pay through taxes are too lazy and greedy to do their jobs?Furthermore, Corona and Anon both note in this very thread that public support for the unions on this issue is VERY low.So, YOU shut the heck up, for once in your life, if such a thing is even possible.

"Oh, so you think that Wisconsin parents are HAPPY that their kids are being deprived of an education because the union teachers whose salaries the parents pay through taxes are too lazy and greedy to do their jobs?" adam

What the fuck are you talking about? You're saying Wisconsin kids are being denied an education. That's what you're saying. You're wrong. There is no fucking way you're going to tell us all Wisconsin kids are being denied an education. It is such a vast untruth that it begs a DSM diagnosis because it's so simply untrue. You're lying again, adam. This is an unfortunate thing for a Methodist to do. Or did you say you were a Unitarian?

"There is no fucking way you're going to tell us all Wisconsin kids are being denied an education."No, not ALL (You'll notice I never said "All Wisconsin kids") just the ones with union teachers. It is a fact that as a result of the teachers' union throwing their temper tantrums, many Wisconsin schools are currently closed. Hence, the kids are indeed at least temporarily being deprived of an education because of how selfish the union teachers are.btw, I am indeed a Methodist, what I said is clearly not a lie, and in either case, a Christophobic bigot like you has no business lecturing me on how to be a good Christian.

Links to this post:

About Me

I am a 30,000 year old reincarnated being who materializes once every 5000 years in a Las Vegas hotel suite. My greatest goal in my eternal life is to spend 6 months on a small tropical island with Mary Matalin doing nothing but pitching a DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert) deal with her. If you happen to be Mary Matalin, please contact me at:
pjcomix@gmail.com. If you are anybody else, you can contact me there too. Remember, if you are a book publisher, please feel free to embarrass me with an extravagant book advance.