OtomePeach

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Posts : 23317Join date : 2011-03-09

He coughed, smiling.

"Sorry. Homosexual, not gay. What would I do without you, Mars-Bar? Ah, look, this is the house!" Practically quivering with excitement, Priestly skipped up the paved walkway to the door. "There's enough supernatural energy here to make a girlscout's head spin--literally." He giggled.

Axton

Posts : 23660Join date : 2011-03-09Age : 24

Mars stared at the candy bar, wondering why in the hell he put up with that man, before he shrugged it off and decided to eat it, anyway. He was normally more strict with his diet, but he could just make up for it by adding some exercise to his schedule.

OtomePeach

After an awkward few minutes of waiting, a small woman answered the door.

"H-hello?"

Priestly bobbed his head, beaming.

"My name is Priestly, and this is my partner, Mars--would you like to hear the word of God today?"

She paused for a moment, looking unsure; Priestly spoke again.

"There's never a wrong time for salvation."

Reluctantly, she opened the door.

"...Yes, I suppose I have time...please come inside." Before she had finished speaking, the fake missionary had gently pushed past her and into the house.

"Nice place you have here, miss. And don't worry, I know what you're thinking--though he looks very effeminate, Mars and I are not that type of partner. Because we're missionaries, and we're religious, and God says that's wrong."

OtomePeach

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Posts : 23317Join date : 2011-03-09

He laughed.

"Oh, Mars, don't hit on those we're trying to convert." Inconspicuously patting Mars on the butt, he sat down on the living room couch.

"So, ma'am, before we can begin spreading our message, we'd like to ask a few question of you...namely, has anything odd happened to you lately? Please answer honestly, anything you tell us can help us decide how best to rid your life of the devil and fill it with God's protection.

The woman gulped nervously, sitting in an armchair.

"Are you sure I can't get you boys some tea, or--"

"Please answer my question, ma'am." He looked more intimidating that normal; the very posture he struck while sitting conveyed potential violence. "Mars, explain why knowing if the devil is present is so important to our process." He watched Mars with pleasure, wondering if he'd be lost at the sudden prompt.

Axton

Posts : 23660Join date : 2011-03-09Age : 24

Mars simple shrugged.

"Well, ma'am, it would be quite detrimental to all of your health if you were hiding something. You see, the Lord's protection is delicate, and so to fully protect you, we have to be sure to expel all the bad things first, in order to protect the good." He smiled warmly at her. "So, please...Don't hold anything back. We are men of the Lord; your secrets are safe with us."

OtomePeach

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Posts : 23317Join date : 2011-03-09

The poor woman broke down into tears.

"I'd tell you...but you wouldn't believe me!"

Priestly chuckled, placing his hand on Mars's thigh.

"Trust me, Mars here has seen a lot--he's had a particularly sinful and sensual past, filled with many pleasures of the flesh and filthy low points that no god-fearing man should ever experience. I'm sure he won't be surprised by anything you say."

Axton

OtomePeach

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Posts : 23317Join date : 2011-03-09

Mouthing, "I'm not joking," Priestly leaned back in his seat. The woman wiped away her tears.

"Okay...I'll try.

"I...I moved to this house a few years ago, when my aunt died and left it to me...I've never had any problems, until about a year ago. Just...strange little noises, at first...furniture would move to different parts of the room when I left...and then...then it got worse." She paused, sniffling; Priestly nudged Mars, motioning that he should comfort her.

OtomePeach

Admin

Posts : 23317Join date : 2011-03-09

Priestly nodded.

"Please don't let my partner put you off, ma'am--we're here to help."

She sniffled, taking a deep breath.

"...Accidents started happening. We had three fires in a month, all from candles I hadn't left burning; the chandelier in the dining room almost crushed me; a tree fell through the window of my bedroom when I went to the bathroom during the night; my husband fell down the stairs and got injured. He's still in the hospital."