Monthly Instalments

Driving home late one night, a man spotted a car on fire. He rushed over to help and saw that a beautiful woman was trapped inside, bleeding to death. He dragged her to safety from the flames, wrapped her in a blanket and drove her to the nearest hospital. Over the next six months, he regularly donated blood to keep her alive. It was touch and go whether she pulled through, but eventually she did recover and later that year they got married.

For two years they lived happily together, but then she grew restless and decided to leave him. As she came down the stairs one morning, carrying two large suitcases and a set of car keys, he challenged her: “Where are you going?”

“I’m leaving you,” she said coldly.

“What are you doing with the car keys?”

“I’m leaving in the Mercedes.”

“No, you’re not. It’s my car. I paid for that. You’re not having it.”

“Fine,” she said, and threw the keys at him.

“And what’s in those bulging suitcases?” he demanded.

“My clothes,” she said.

“You mean the clothes I’ve paid for? They’re not going anywhere!”

“Fine,” she said, tipping out the cases before stripping off completely and hurling her clothes at him.

“And,” he continued, warming to the theme, “what about the blood in your body? I sat with you for six months in the hospital. You know half of the blood is mine. You’re not going anywhere.”

With that, she whipped out her tampon and said: “I’ll pay you back in monthly instalments!”