Batman/Superman combo tops the "w**k-bank"

Teenage boys throughout the known world have been fervently tearing down posters of buxom Katy Perry, to make way for images of the forthcoming film devoted to the "Man of Steel" & "The Caped Crusader".

The surprise announcement made by Zack Snyder, speaking at San Diego's comic convention, was greeted by groans of desire from the gathered geeks. "We asked ourselves, what would our target demographic want to see?" explained one Warner Bros executive. "Initial thoughts were a re-boot of Ibsen's 'Hedda Gabler' or maybe 'Waiting for Godot', but in the end we plumped for another mind-numbing, comic-book 'w**k-fest'."

There have been wider concerns that this movie will feed the growing rise of online superhero porn. PM David Cameron has said Google needed to do more to block results from "depraved and disgusting" search terms, such as "two superheroes, one cup". "We are creating a generation of young men who have no grip on reality and little incentive to get a girlfriend," said a No.10 spokeswoman. "A franchise like this can generate billions of dollars for movie studies but there is a hidden cost to the consumer in both vaseline, kleenex and hairy palms."