I've been feeling a bit down these past few days... I've been sick (nothing major), a bit frustrated and, also, a bit sad. Bits of everything, huh? Haha. Does it ever happen to you? You get these weird feelings that make you nauseous and you just want to stop feeling, make everything stop, feel numbed, calm, at ease... It's not about feeling happy or being bright and shiny, I've never been like that to begin with, but I wish I could take a pill that would just make me stop caring about certain things.

I'm well liked, I think... I rarely have any trouble or conflict with others, and when that happens it's mostly due to misunderstandings. I don't know if I'm too nice or too approachable, I've been thinking lately that I might be, and people feel like there's nothing exciting to see anymore and leave. I've built up a front that might be interesting for some, that creates an alluring aura but, for some reason, when I let them see beyond that, I lose face, I lose appeal and, whether I like it or not, it affects me, it makes me feel empty.

I'm sure there must be something I can do about this, I just need to figure it out. Human nature works like that sometimes, you see something shiny and you want to reach it but when you're too close, it loses some of its sparkle, you get bored and move on to the next captivating thing. So, unless I find a happy little pill that numbs me, I have to think long and hard about how can I stop this from happening or, even better, how can I let it not affect me. Any suggestions?