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There is only one true test of Hammock Manhood in the Hammock World: The Texas Butt Bake.

This winter we were shown pictures and video of bearded men swathed in many layers of down and fleece, hunched over fires and entombed in hammocks engulfed by top and underquilts of fearsome dimensions. We watched as they spoke to us from within them as condensaton rose from thier ashen faces, frost bibs secured around their necks, trumpeting their acheivement in defying sub zero temperatures merely by the clever use of fabric.

It is time that we, Men Of The South, Men Of TEXAS! show them true adventure! We shall show them that the greater feat is in surviving temperatures that can be defied only by enduring them! We cannot take off enough clothing or sleep gear to protect us from vicissitudes of weather that WE face!

Imagine pictures and video of hardy men, sweat glistening off of thier bodies, cheerily hoisting flagons of iced tea with nothing but a pair of Ray Bans and cargo shorts to protect themselves from the sunlight! Imagine the awe with which they will view us and the glory that will be ours!!