Forum » Topic: Love the tramp story today.http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705
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newsbiscuit editorial team on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69947
Sat, 28 May 2011 16:54:54 +0000newsbiscuit editorial team69947@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Well done waylandsmithy on another excellent sub and worthy FP - and it raises an interesting point (at least before Britain's Got Talent starts) about the headline. One man's meat is another's pet chihuahua and all that, but for this particular office chimp, the headline simply didn't sell the funny contents well enough. Headlines need to draw the reader in, in much the same way as personal ad - and we have a lot of experience of those. "Excellent lover who can shag until 4am then unload the dishwasher on the way out" is more likely to get a look than "Pulse and bathes occasionally". A twist within the copy can work very well, but the twist should not be between the headline and the copy itself - ultimately we are a news parody and none of us would continue to read the Daily Sport if the headline was "Something happened in the world today - guess what". Because of course, incisive world commentary is the main reason for reading the Daily Sport.</p>
<p>The standard of subs has been excellent of late and please do all keep 'em coming. And not just when you're 'reading' the Sport...
</p>Anonymous on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69922
Sat, 28 May 2011 12:19:57 +0000Anonymous69922@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Hmm, I think I might be coming at the subs in the wrong way. I like puns, but normally have to think them up after writing the idea down. I normally start by thinking of a 'twist', rather than a joke. Do others work the same way? Do you have to make it funny afterwards??
</p>rickwestwell on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69919
Sat, 28 May 2011 12:09:36 +0000rickwestwell69919@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>And it's a shame when you know the headline is the whole thing, and the rest of the story has to be just padding. That happens a bit here because we don't give as much prominence to great one-liners as the Mash or the Onion. So on the Mash, the "Blackberries in burqas" story was just a headline with good picture, but here it had to be a full 300-worder, or not get a pic.</p>
<p>I think you always have to find two great gags at least, for the headline and the last line. And they shouldn't be the same.</p>
<p>Maybe the left alerts are the way forward.</p>
<p>Mind you, what do I know? Bugger all, that's what.
</p>Golgo13 on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69916
Sat, 28 May 2011 12:02:14 +0000Golgo1369916@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>...
</p>Golgo13 on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69915
Sat, 28 May 2011 11:58:53 +0000Golgo1369915@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>I hate putting my best joke (or the punchline) in the headline...</p>
<p>...but it's often the way to go. I expect a lot of movie directors hate putting good bits in trailers too.
</p>Anonymous on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69900
Sat, 28 May 2011 10:40:37 +0000Anonymous69900@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Cheers Rick, I shall definitely take that on board! I think I've been trying to condense the whole story into the headline, must stick to a relevant gag instead.
</p>rickwestwell on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69896
Sat, 28 May 2011 10:26:27 +0000rickwestwell69896@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Great FP. Loved the sub, not a weak line in it.</p>
<p>Headlines are buggers, though. I usually cock them up trying to be too clever or subtle, and quite rightly no-one bothers to read them. And they should be funny, even to the extent of revealing the main gag of the piece, so "British tramps under threat: special report" didn't quite cut it.</p>
<p>Good stuff, anyway.
</p>Anonymous on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69893
Sat, 28 May 2011 10:08:56 +0000Anonymous69893@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Hi Ron, </p>
<p>Yep, my original headline was lousy.</p>
<p>I really must work on my headlines, they never seem to work. My 'wildlife' sub was roundly ignored yesterday, but I'm convinced it's my best sub, I spent ages on it! </p>
<p>It's weird. I thought my arctic roll sub was pretty weak, but it made it as a NiB. But a couple of other subs that I was really pleased with sank without a trace.</p>
<p>Perhaps I just have a crap sense of humour.
</p>ronseal on "Love the tramp story today."http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=25705#post-69875
Sat, 28 May 2011 06:53:39 +0000ronseal69875@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Lots of good stuff there.</p>
<p>I imagine Julie Hartley Brewer would love to rip this one off.</p>
<p>thing is, I didn't notice it before</p>
<p>Has the headline changed?
</p>