Breakfast at Vitony's

Holy Schlemoley...the tomato crop, she is'a explodin'!! This follows close on the heels of this year's cornucopious blueberry crop.

See, for the past several weeks, it has been blueberry heaven, so my usual morning bowl of fruit & some cultured milk product has included a healthy helping of blubes (...which are apparently considered a “superfood” by the people who make up stuff like that).

Well, the blubes are starting to ramp down and tail off, but now here comes the 'maters. First we had those delightful little red mini-Roma tomatoes and the yellow mini-pear tomatoes, but now the big ones are coming in. As I recall, they're some kinda meatless, non-dairy, heirloom Beefsteak 'maters, or something.

All I know is that my grandma used to make this explosively flavorful tomato and cucumber salad with stuff she picked fresh from grandpa's huge garden, so I figure someone has to carry on the fambly tradition.

Besides, you know the old saying: "When life hands you lemons, you make 'mater and cuke salad."

Cut up the 'maters (in this case, it only took one medium-large 'mater) and a smallish fresh cucumber (also from the garden)

Add chopped fresh garlic

Add extra virgin olive oil (I guess the extra virgin is so you'll have a spare in case the main virgin breaks down, or something)

I like to accompany it with some kinda bread to sop up the juice at the end...in this case, an onion bagel (untoasted).

DISCLAIMER: As I recall, bread-like carbs are still non-politically correct, but I can't keep up with all the golldang dietary Current Wisdom™. They keep changing it, and all the friggin' "experts" never agree, so to hell with 'em. I don't eat crap food anyway, so the experts can just bite me.

Well, it ain't Breakfast at Tiffany's, but that's a Vitonese breakfast fo' a fine Sattidey mornin'.

Dang, but that looks good Veet! I'll have to try that out. I'm a HUGE fan of 'maters, and the homegrown kind especially.

My late Pap grew some freakin' awesome 'maters back in Wiz-gon-sin. There, we had very acidic soil, and his Beefsteak, Early Girls, Cherry 'maters, and the like were like nirvana. He'd send me home with literally several shopping bags of them every week!

Sadly, where I live, the only things I can grow is moss and weeds. Too many tall firs and poor soil. So I try and frequent the farmers markets in season to get my fix. Yet none of them lives up to the standards of Pap's 'maters!

I clearly remember my late Mom making a salad of Pap's 'maters, fresh sliced Bermuda onions, cottage cheese, and a splash of Ranch Dressing. Top it with fresh ground black pepper and you're good to go!

We make the same sort of thing all summer long. Instead of oregano we use fresh basil and also add a little sweet onion, thinly sliced, and use balsamic vinegar instead of red wine vinegar. Slice a baguette, drizzle olive oil on the slices and toast the slices under the broiler, then rub the toasted slices with a garlic clove. Place em on a plate and pile the mater mix on top. A glass of red wine, life is good

_________________These are horrible times and all sorts of horrible people are prospering, but we must never let this disturb our equanimity or deflect us from our sacred duty to annoy and hinder them at every turn.

Man, the thing I quickly learned about Balsamic is that sure, you can buy a <$10 bottle at any ol' grocery store, and some of those aren't bad at all, but even the decent ones are a very different, lesser thing than real, aged Balsamic vinegar. I'm only into them a few years and not that many dollars. I'm certainly no expert, and my experience is limited. Nevertheless, had someone not given me a gift basket that just so happened to have a 18 year old bottle of Balsamic, I would have continued to be skeptical. You know what? Sometimes, snooty culinary culture isn't just that. There's actually a reason why store bought balsamic is snubbed. One of those things I encourage people to break out their wallets to try. Spend the $30 at a specialty store or ethnic grocery store. If you don't like it on your food, it's so good that you can sip it out of a small glass (I'm not joking). And if you like it, you can probably get a couple summers out of a single 16oz bottle. It seems like a big investment, but over time, it really isn't.

What's the difference? The cheaper stuff is like what you'd expect from vinegar. It's thin. It has an acidic bite. It usually has coloring and other stuff, like sweetener, to make it look like actual balsamic vinegar. The real stuff doesn't really taste like what we expect of vinegar. It's sweet, rich, and barely resembles vinegar at all in any respect. It's also thick like maple syrup, which is why it can go a long way. And you can literally drink it as something you'd enjoy to sip and enjoy.

I'm still trying to find a good red wine vinegar. I've tried a few recommendations, but none have done it for me.