I like feeling small. I enjoy being reminded that on Earth and in this universe we play such a tiny role; we have such a slim slice of the pie. I seek out places that remind me of this.

I took this photo in Iceland last January. Instead of traveling the typical path after landing, I instead hopped in my sweet Kia Sportage and drove 4 hours north to a town called Sauðárkrókur. I stayed with a sweet family there that I will tell you more about in a later post.

During the 6-7 hours of daylight I had each day, I would hop in and drive. Sure, there were a couple of spots on my list to check out, but I kept my eyes open for what I did not know I wanted to see. I drove for hours each day, and at most, I would pass 10 or 12 cars each day. I felt alone in a frozen Martian landscape that was splayed out for my eyes and future memories to feast on.

I like feeling insignificant in vast landscapes. There’s a strange comfort in it. Most of the time I obsess over my legacy. It causes me to say “should” too much and beat myself up for not climbing my imaginary ladder fast enough. I seek out places that remind me that life is going on and I have literally no control over it – so just breathe and be present.

Meditation, when I remember to do it, helps me go to this feeling when I can’t fly to the middle of nowhere. It’s a step. I am working on slowing down but it’s hard in world that tells you, you will never be fast enough.

I get in my own way a lot. My thoughts discount my ideas. Years of having a low self esteem have caused me to share my stories less with others. Instead I listen, I focus, I make them feel like every bit of what they are telling me matters – because if it matters to them then I can let it matter to me. But why don’t I share more then? If it matters to me, surely they will pay the curiosity and attention in return. Alas, I convince myself otherwise.

I have a weird goal this year. It’s to let others care more about me than I think I deserve. I want to share more because authenticity is a two-way street and the love I pour into others I, too, am allowed to feel.

It’s hard to write when you don’t know what to say. It’s hard to smile when you don’t know if you’re allowed. It’s hard to laugh when you don’t think you deserve to. It’s hard to speak when you question your every word. It’s hard to trust when you lie. It’s hard to be present when all you do is question. It’s hard to be happy when nothing is enough. It’s hard to move on when you caused a mess. It’s hard to help when you’re not the person who is allowed to help anymore. It’s hard to give advice when you’re a hypocrite. It’s hard to be loved when you do not love yourself. It’s hard to reach out to others when you’re lost. It’s hard to change. It’s hard to be loved. It’s hard to be selfish.

It’s easy to stay where you are. It’s easy to blame yourself for everything. It’s easy to stew in guilt. It’s easy to settle. It’s easy to never question. It’s easy to never ask for help. It’s easy to go at it alone. It’s easy to assume. It’s easy to run. It’s easy to tell other people what they should do. It’s easy to think you know what’s right. It’s easy to find fault in others. It’s easy to follow society’s path. It’s easy to fall into and stay in routines. It’s easy to be selfish.

We all have something we are going through. We all question from time to time if we are doing the right thing. Many of us do not want to be seen as selfish while at the same time strive to live a life where we are happy. Internal conflict is going to happen, but just as my buddy Greg once told me, “It does not make it wrong. It just makes it hard.” And you and I can make it through hard, friend.

I was asked in a recent interview, “What advice would you give to educators who want to inspire students?” In short, my answer was: Stop telling other people’s stories and start telling your own.

Soapbox time. One of my BIGGEST speaker pet peeves is when I hear a speaker quote Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Theresa, Nelson Mandela, etc., etc. I think it’s easy, hack, and cliché. Educators, we are better than that. I personally feel it’s not the best use of my words because I am none of those people, and nor will ever I be. If I hear one more time that Michael Jordan got cut from his high school basketball team or that Wayne Gretsky said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take,” I may boil over. Shout out to Steve Jobs, Henry David Thoreau, and Eleanor Roosevelt. Everyone who I have listed is amazing. They are heroes, societal game changers, the best at what they did, the most innovative, stupidly impressive and worthy of all of the respect and admiration they have.

But here is what we have to remember, mentors. Today’s students will become us before they become the world’s future heroes. Trying to inspire someone with one of the individuals above makes as much sense as trying to motivate a small boy who wants to be a lumberjack with Paul Bunyan’s story. It’s an amazing tale but it’s unrealistic. Instead, introduce that boy to the local logger who is climbing the ladder of success. Or maybe stop cutting down trees…but that’s a topic for another day.

Please note: I’m not saying we can’t have our mentees and our audiences dreaming big. I am saying that we need to give them realistic palpable examples and steps of how to chase down those dreams.

Quotes are an efficient and effective way to springboard into a point, but speakers who quote these people and then drop the mic are doing it wrong. It is only after we break down quotes and follow them up with examples relevant to our audience that we can lead an audience member to water and inspire her or him to drink.

We do that by telling our own stories, where we succeeded, where we slipped and what we learned from both. Inspiring students with personal and tangible examples of things like: creating change, following passion, being better leaders, making a difference, and/or being more socially and globally conscious will expose them to more substantial true-to-life approaches with to how to start.

Here is the kicker, my fellow educators; your story is good enough. Sometimes we feel the need to tell other’s stories because we are self-conscious about our own not having enough weight. Believe me, that’s the exact reason I spoke for free for 3-4 years. Spoiler alert friends: your story is plenty powerful and way more accessible and therefore will be way more effective in inspiring others than if you try and tell someone else’s. So, tell me your story.