Don’t Hate The Player, Hate The Beard: Bearded Men Are More Likely To Cheat

Why Is This Important?

Long Story Short

A survey has found that bearded men are more likely to fight, cheat and steal than those who are clean-shaven. (But at least they look on-trend while they’re doing it.)

Long Story

Karl Marx? Kleptomaniac. Father Christmas? Fights with elves all the time. Hagrid from Harry Potter? The man’s got side chicks galore.

OK, so those aren’t exactly facts, but hear us out. A recent survey has revealed some damning stats about men with beards:

Bearded men are 27% more likely to cheat, with almost half (47%) admitting to have cheated in the past, compared to just 20% of clean-shaven men.

Men with beards are 16% more likely to get a kick out of a fight, with 45% of them saying that they’d enjoy it.

And 40% of men with facial hair have admitted to stealing things in the past, compared to 17% of smooth-faced men.

And if you’re sitting there stroking your whiskers and shaking your head in disappointment, the survey revealed even more facts that will kick you while you’re down: women don’t like beards either. 65% of them said that it wasn’t a good look for a modern man, half of them would never date a man with a full-beard, and 39% are worried that they might find food in it (legit concern).

Basically the research, commissioned by video social network eva, seems to say that men with beards are generally terrible human beings. Which we’re sure is not an accusation that either Rick Ross or Jesus is going to take lying down.

Own The Conversation

Ask The Big Question: Is there really a difference between bearded and non-bearded human beings?

Disrupt Your Feed: I can't help that women find my face-fuzz irresistible, that having overtly masculine tendencies means I love a good punch-up, and that my beard is generally really useful for hiding stolen goods.