Posts Tagged ‘Cera’

In the latest issue of Procycling Magazine, Italian Riccardo Ricco said he’s still haunted by flashbacks of being thrown out of the 2008 Tour de France after testing positive for CERA.

“At first you can barely look people in the eye.” said Ricco. “You gradually inch back towards normal life, but it’s horrible at first.”

But being kicked out the Tour and tossed in a French jail was nothing compared to the horrible punishment he was later forced to endure. A punishment that brought him to the brink, rock bottom. Ricco was forced to teach spinning classes at a local gym.

Picture that if you will: the bold and brash Ricco, the self-styled “Cobra,” leading a spin class. Could there be any more demeaning punishment? The man who destroyed the best climbers in the world on the Col d’Aspin reduced to helping chubby Italian housewives lose weight pedaling stationary bikes. Now that’s punishment.

Shouldn’t president Pat McQuaid of the UCI be looking into that kind of punishment and other creative deterrents? Ricco admitted the spin class experience taught him a lesson. “It really shocks you. And humiliates you,” said the Cobra. You bet it does. Especially when 25 ladies yell at you to slow down and question your musical selections for the class.

Twisted Spoke thinks this opens up a whole new level of punishments. You want to send a no doping message to riders with huge egos? Make them do menial tasks. Spin class is just the beginning. What about forcing them to teach needlepoint to seniors? Scrap-booking seminars for the blind?

The two year ban and a meaty fine is all well and good but the fear of teaching spin class again is what will keep Riccardo clean.

Hum along with us, will ya? “Euskaltel-Euskadi, out of the tour, so carelessly.”

News that Mikel Astarloza’s B sample tested positive for EPO was expected. What wasn’t expected was the reaction from the beleaguered Basque squad. Instead of a statement condemning the rider’s illegal doping, the team reiterated its full support and belief in Astarloza’s innocence. Not a wise idea.

They announced on their web site that they have “trust in the riders innocence. We have placed this affair in the hands of our lawyers to prove he is innocent.” That was the sound of next year’s Tour de France invite being torn up.

The Tour de France is famously protective of its image and prestige. Even Alberto Contador was not allowed to defend his first title, a victim of Alexander Vinokourov’s blood doping the previous tour. If the French think you’re dirty, they don’t require a note from the UCI or WADA. And they certainly don’t need to wait six months for the Court of Arbitration in Sport to render a decision. As far as tour officials are concerned, Astarloza, the supposed winner of stage 16 in Bourg Saint-Maurice, has insulted the honor of the tour.

Euskatel’s only hope of keeping their invite was to condemn Astar-Losers’ doping offense. Their statement should have read “we have ripped his heart out and chopped off his head, which we’re delivering to you in a diamond crusted box. We hope that’s enough, we’re really really sorry.” Harsh but a start in the right direction.

Instead, we have Director Sportif Gorka Gerrikagoitia standing firmly behind his rider’s syringe. (Now why did I write syringe when I meant story?) You have to appreciate the loyalty but question the intelligence. Hard medical science, a positive A & B sample versus “gosh, he said he’s innocent so we believe him.” An extra tough sell considering that in July one of their other riders, Inago Landaluze, admitted to using CERA EPO.

So how exactly does Euskatel plan on proving Asatrloza’s innocence since they won’t be using any facts? The rider himself admitted it won’t be easy: “Unfortunately, I can’t prove it, and I can’t explain what happened,” said the Basque rider. In other words, don’t look for those bright orange jerseys in the Tour de France next year. Euskaltel-Euskadi blew that opportunity big time.

I'll sign this autograph if you come up with a good conspiracy theory.

Lies, denials and attempts to discredit labs and testing methodologies are one thing. But far too often accused riders who’ve failed drug tests stretch the limits of credibility by blaming their positive tests on a conspiracy.

Names are never named, theories are never explained, facts uncovered or witnesses produced. There is never any legal or logical plausibility to these conspiracies. They just exist in an ether that is almost supernatural or science fiction.

Today, Danilo di Luca, he of the failed A and B sample taken on two Giro stages, turned desperate with the “conspiracy” theory. Said Di Luca, “I just can’t explain the two positive tests at the Giro. I’m not ruling out a conspiracy but before I can confirm it I have to be sure.” Good luck with that.

There is a long line of such laughable behavior. Alexandre Vinokourov blamed a vague conspiracy to “tarnish our image” and derail his tour de France preparations.

Floyd Landis insisted there was a “conspiracy” at the Chatenay-Malabry lab to discredit him and strip him of his fairly earned Tour de France victory. He spent two million dollars on his defense but very few people believe that yarn.

Following his suspension for doping, Iban Mayo, the Basque super climber, ranted that there was a conspiracy at the UCI. The Saunier Duval rider believed they were out to discredit him for reasons he never made clear, supported or proved.

Marco Pantani, a man filled with delusions of grandeur and the habit of referring to himself in the third person, felt he too was persecuted. The rider once referred to as Mr. 60% for his sky high hematocrit level, alleged he was, you guessed it, “a victim of a conspiracy.”

Lithuania rider Raimondas Rumsas, third in the 2003 Tour de France, reacted to his doping suspension with an extra twist: the conspiracy was perpetrated by his own team. He followed that outlandish claim with this gem: “It could be that (Lampre) wants to get rid of me…” He had no explanation for the large quantity of doping products the French police found in his wife’s car.

Richard Virenque, the rider at the center of the infamous Festina doping scandal, denied his guilt for years even when three of his team-mates admitted to a whole host of illegal drugs. Before eventually confessing, the winner of seven Polka Dot jerseys went on tv in tears to proclaim his innocence and that yes, he was a victim of a conspiracy.

One thing seems clear: the bigger the ego, the more likely the conspiracy excuse. This far-fetched explanation requires the kind of out-of-control ego that’s lost all concept of truth. The kind of person who believes they operate in a separate universe where all rules and regulations are theirs to twist with no regard for meaning.

Conspiracy theories work well for presidential assassinations, Wall Street financial scandals and Hollywood back stabbing. But it strains credibility in the world of professional cycling. Danilo di Luca is like the kid who claims Nazi frogmen stole his homework.

Next up, Alejandro Valverde. After being banned for two years in Italy, the Spanish rider will most likely have that extended to the rest of the cycling world. Expect a conspiracy explanation from Alejandro very soon. But don’t expect any facts to go with it.

Di Luca finished second overall in the Giro to Russian Denis Menchov of Rabobank.

“These adverse findings were a result of a targeted test programme using information from Di Luca’s biological passport, ” the UCI press release stated. “The system works, we are eradicating cake in the peloton,” said UCI president Pat McQuaid.

Could this mean a possible lifetime ban for the rider they call “the Killer?”

Often confused with CERA, the EPO derivative, SARAH –especially the Double Chocolate Layer Cake — is often used as a intense sugar boost right before a mountain stage. While not illegal for the average person with a sweet tooth, SARAH is on the UCI list of banned substances.

It’s an open secret that cake usage is rife in the peloton, with the coconut, coffee and classic Sarah Lee pound cake the most popular choices.

On Friday, the Carabinieri anti-drug unit raided Di Luca’s house near Pescara and the nearby residence of Dr Paulo Baruccione, the grocer accused of supplying the cake. They turned up nothing except a fork crusted with icing. The fork was taken away for further analysis.

While awaiting his B-sample, Di Luca maintained his innocence: “why would I eat cake? It’s fattening.”

Rebellin, Schumacher, Kohl – why have three high powered lawyers and the needless legal expenses? I think these guys should get a group rate: one lawyer, one cost, maybe even make them one person to simpify the process. “Your honor, my disgraced cycling client Davide Stefan Bernard.” Sounds smart to me.

And while we’re making new combinations, let’s agree to never refer to the old team Gerolsteiner team name again. From now on, it’s Cera-steiner, in honor of their EPO of choice. When you reach the critical mass of three riders on the same team, you have to figure there’s more rats under the carpet.

There’s a certain Three Stooges quality to all this. Kohl admits, Schumacher denies and Rebellin prays his Olympic B sample somehow comes back clean. Until then, Rebellin will maintain the usual shocked, amazed, there-must-be-some-mistake stance all dopers use. There’s probably an Idoits Guide to Denying Doping book somewhere for riders that gives them all the keys phases.

Next up, Mr Valverde. I can just feel it coming. And nobody does denial better than Valverde.

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Gumby is back. Yes, he breaks but he always comes back strong. Veteran American rider Chris Horner showed everybody in the Tour of Sardinia he’s feeling few effects from his five major crashes last year. The bald headed rider from Bend, Oregon put on an impressive display in the queen stage, finishing 2nd to Roman Kreuziger […]

In our second installment of Dutch treats to celebrate the fast approaching Belgian racing season, we tackle the tantalizing subject of Belgian frites, the beloved Dutch snack. Bike racing and Belgian frites are so deeply intertwined in the culture that it’s fair to ask if one could survive without the other. There is no tour […]