New Magazine to Ruin Reality TV-Loving Lifestyle

No More Lazy-Ass Lifestyle

In May, the solution to the bulging American waistline will arrive in the form of a new magazine called, "Healthy Family Magazine." OK, so it's only a magazine and not some new fangled diet that will, like all the others, guarantee weight loss with the vigor of penis enhancement products. All the same, Founder and Publisher Richard Bulman think he has identified a sweet spot, an untapped niche, not yet covered by a magazine - the health concerns of the family unit.

Bulman assures us it won't be filled with "Ten Days to a Slimmer Waistline" type headlines but take a more serious tone cutting through the inconsistencies of most dieting fads. The magazine will launch initially with 220,000 circulation which Bulman is confident will grow to 300,000 very soon after launch. He's got some big name advertisers signed up too. Kraft, Ford, Disney, Dove and Dannon are booked into the premiere issue. In all, Bulman says he has 25 national advertisers lined up.

I suppose this is all well and good but now we there's just one more nagging voice screaming at our reality tv-addled brains to get up off the couch and actually do something with our lives. Bummer. And I was looking forward to enjoying "The Apprentice 2" with a bag of Doritos and Cheese Wiz dip.