Tuesday, May 29, 2012

It is
inevitable that you are going to encounter some uncomfortable situations in
your life, everybody does. Our untrained egos are very sensitive and can easily
feel threatened, causing emotions of insecurity, worry and fear to develop in
the center of our hearts. These emotions can quickly spiral out of control as
our negative thoughts multiply in a chain reaction and tighten their grasp
around the pit of our stomach.

I used to
think that the trick to getting rid of such negative emotions was to simply stop
thinking about whatever it is that’s bothering you, to just change the subject
and block it out. Your thoughts have direct control over your emotions, so if
you just start thinking about something happy and positive then your emotions
will follow your lead. If only it was that easy! Sometimes it’s impossible to
get such uncomfortable subjects and situations out of your head, not matter how
hard you try.

But alas,
the trick is not to rid yourself of these thoughts and just avoid thinking
about the situation that is causing you pain. Instead you need to change what
this situation means to you. Step out of your current position that’s
creating these negative emotions and see things from a different angle. Don’t
try to push your thoughts away altogether and sweep the dirt under the rug, for
you will be missing a prime opportunity to grow! Allow yourself to reflect on
whatever it is that is causing that discomfort at the bottom of your heart and
ask yourself some important questions. How can I learn from this? What lesson
is this situation trying to teach me? What virtues do I need to practice in the
face of this discomfort?

It is true
that our thoughts control our emotions, but instead of entirely changing WHAT
you’re thinking in order to alter your feelings you can instead change HOW
you’re thinking. And in having control over HOW you’re thinking you will exercise
your power over your ego and become a stronger person within.

So the next
time you encounter a difficult situation or thought pattern that you don’t want
to face, rather than pushing it aside, look at it dead-on, change what it means
to you, find the hidden lesson to be learned and give yourself a pat on the
back for taking advantage of the opportunity to grow.

Monday, May 21, 2012

I’ve noticed an unsettling bad habit that far
too many people have acquired: neglecting gratitude. Rather than being thankful
for what we do have, it seems that our natural default state is to focus on what
we don’t have. We don’t have enough money. We don’t have a nice car. We don’t
have a perfect relationship, or a perfect job, or perfect teeth. It’s like we
live in a dark cloud of scarcity that prevents us from ever being truly happy.

All of that stuff that we wish we had but we
don’t, or we wish was perfect but isn’t, is ALWAYS going to be there. That will
never change. And the sooner we realize that the better, because if we spend
our time and energy worrying about what we DON’T have rather than appreciating
what we DO have it is literally impossible for us to be happy! I know this is a very simple concept
that we’ve been taught since we were children but it seems to me like many of
us have forgotten the basics and need a little reminder.

If you focus on what’s missing in your life then you put
yourself in a negative state that’s fueled by fear, doubt and worry. You cut
yourself off from the empowering feelings that we need to be successful and
happy. On the other hand, if you start exercising your gratitude muscle and
spending time each day to give sincere appreciation for all the greatness in
your life, you will not only begin to experience a much happier state of being,
but you will also begin to attract even more things into your life to be
thankful for.

So we have two choices: complain about what we
don’t have or be grateful for what we do. It’s really that simple. Sometimes you
may have to stretch a little bit to find those things to be grateful for but
once you make that switch I guarantee you won’t go back.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Not everyone
is born equal. Some people start their life with more money, better health,
more opportunities and more love. But the one thing that absolutely everybody
has the same amount of is time. There are 24 hours in a day, no matter what.

So where
does all of that time go for you? Let’s say you sleep for 8 hours a day and
work for 8 hours a day, that adds up to 16 and you have 8 left. Showering,
eating and driving probably takes up about 2 more. Maybe you go to the gym,
there’s another hour. You might have a husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend,
maybe even kids too so there’s the rest of your night. And if you’re single you
probably have some sort of hobby that keeps you busy like playing an instrument
or a sport. Happy hour after work with friends can easily eat up the rest of
that time and send you straight to bed when you’re done.

As you can
see, that 24 hours can disappear pretty quickly. . . and then we wake up and do
it all over again! But an extremely important part of living a balanced and
healthy life is taking time for ourselves, to focus on our own growth
and education. In order tomake
progress in our lives it is vital that we invest some time and energy into
looking at everything: identifying what’s going well and not going well, coming
up with solutions to our “problems” (both internally and externally), setting
goals, making gameplans/strategies and continuously learning new things. When
we begin to set that process in motion we embark on an upward spiral of
personal development that can be extremly rewarding and exciting.

At the end
of the day, many people feel like they’re stuck in the “rat race”. And most
people think of that in just financial terms, of getting by from paycheck to
paycheck. But this also applies within, and all too often. If you’re not taking
the time out of your day to focus on your growth then you’re going through your
own internal rat race that leaves you right where you were the day before and
with an endless feeling of being “stuck”.

So if you’re
spinning the wheel in either of those races, ecomically or personally, realize
that the only way to break free from that cycle is to start taking time for
yourself. Grab a journal, grab a friend, grab a mouse and a keyboard, whatever
it is you need to grab, grab it now and stop waiting for some special day when
your life is going to magically change itself. Cause it’s not! You are going to
change it and only you. And it’s going to start with finding those few extra
minutes everyday to spend with yourself and have a sincere, honest and loving
conversation. Good luck :)