Sound Bites: October 17, 2014

<p''I think in the olden days they used it as the faculty opium den.'' —Louise, on the school's secret boiler room, on Bob’s Burgers

”You need to calm down. This is a college tour, not Oprah’s Favorite Things.” —Alex (Ariel Winter), to an overenthusiastic Claire (Julie Bowen), on Modern Family

”Just because I don’t like to be around Amy doesn’t mean I don’t care about her.” —Margo (Carrie Coon), to brother Nick (Ben Affleck) after his wife (Rosamund Pike) goes missing, in Gone Girl

”If I carry her through to the top five, it’s an easy sheep to the slaughter later.” —Sean, helping competitor Char not get eliminated, on Project Runway

”According to officials at the CDC, the first case of Ebola in the U.S. has been diagnosed in Texas. And according to WebMD, you already have it.” —Michael Che, during “Weekend Update,” on Saturday Night Live”I look nice, I know, but that’s just my face.”—Bonnie (Liza Weil), when Laurel (Karla Souza) turns to her for advice, on How to Get Away With Murder

”Almost done with fiscal ’09. You get waxed more than the Batmobile.”—Cliff (Glenn Howerton), handling Mindy’s (Mindy Kaling) IRS woes, on The Mindy Project

”All I could hear was the sound of my revenge-free summer being strangled to death by a web of thorns.” —Nolan (Gabriel Mann), when Emily (Emily VanCamp) reveals she’s back to plotting against Victoria (Madeleine Stowe), on Revenge

”Last time you said that, I ended up pregnant.” —Mia (Annabelle Wallis), to her husband (Ward Horton) after he says he wants to give her something, in Annabelle