Hi. I'm new to this board, but I fell across it when I was doing a search for OCD. I've always just joked with people about my "quirks" but they are no longer quirks. They are now consuming my life. My husband thinks that if I know I'm doing these things, I should just be able to stop them. He says that if I know that it's not normal, why can't I just push them aside. I don't know, but I almost wrecked my car yesterday, trying to get the numbers on the license plate in front of me to add up to 24. I know that sounds ridiculous, and I just shook my head as I even wrote it, but that's just the tip of the iceberg.

Over the past few years I've developed this aversion to metal items...watches, money, jewelry...Not my own, just everyone else's. It's like the smell of it and the idea that it is probably covered in germs is just too much for me. Yesterday, something else reared it's ugly head, too. I wanted to eat a salad, and the idea of putting a metal fork in my mouth gagged me and I had to throw my food away. I never mentioned this to my husband. Instead, I suggested we get sandwiches and chips for dinner (no utensils needed...) Last night, I stood at my kitchen sink for an hour and a half washing it, then spraying it with bleach, then drying it, and then when I'd run water I'd have to dry it again and make sure it didn't smell. It's stainless steel, and I have never freaked out about it before.

What in the world is wrong with me??? How do I approach someone for help. Am I just creating this in my mind? Before you answer, keep in mind I haven't even touched on the hair, the skin, the picking and the hand sanitizer yet...

Firstly, Welcome to HW. There are many understanding and knowledgable people here. I personally do not have OCD related issues, but there are definately a few members on the boards who do. I am sure they will be by to help you out.--Michelle

"...I dont want the world to see me 'cause I dont think that they'd understandWhen everythings made to be broken I just want you to know who I am..."--Goo Goo Dolls

SLstotts .......Welcome I am definitely OCD and have been all my life that I can remember Everything has to be balanced I mean everything .......I have a glass coffee table that I have nic nacs on now I have 2 nic nacs of all the ones I have and believe me I have tons ......all nic nacs are set on tables exactly in same spot but on different table ......My freezer even has wicker baskets balanced and kitchen table same thing ...........All my pics in frames and those I have bought are all placed appropriately apart and balanced.........LOL My brothers came in once and it took me a whole 10 minutes to find 17 things they had just slightly turned moved or traded spots ...........I have always been like this I can take meds but I dont for this as I find that I feel less stressed when house is spotless....I take ativan or diazapam for anxiety if needed Same as my dresser and bathroom toiletries actually everything is balanced Another thing I cannot, will not go to bed with a dirty dish or utensil in sink and like you I clean it and dry both sinks out totally I wash my floor every morning I am up at 4 and do my routineI wash the floor minimum 5 times a day everytime I go out the door Cait (daughter waits in car) while I wash it lolI also sweep and wash it before bed and then all over again in the morning....I keep Pine Sol and Bleach in BULKMy bed is made as soon as my feet hit the floor and it is changed at least 2 times weekly (whether I sleep in it or not ) and sometimes 3I have some very wild quirks but the only one I have with utensils is it has to be a light metal and the small fork and knife .......I too count things all kinds of things and it is sometimes really weird what I count lol.........There is medication for OCD and I am wondering if you have seen a doc or therapist about this as it is a real disorder and can be treatedMy doc says I do this and have this routine in my home as I am not able to have the world the way I would like it to be without pain ,hurting peeps suffering and going without things

l have to agree with him on alot of what he says I have tried not washing floor or leaving a few dishes in the sink and I will get up to do them or wash floor ( bugs me til I do it ) It is a disorder and has to be treted as such ..........My info is under name if you want to talk about this in greater lengthFeel free to email me your hubby needs to help you out and support you with this it is hard to live like this I know believe me I am seeing some traits already in my daughter that I have and I have gotten them from my motherHopefully now you realize you are not alone and there are more members here with OCD in many forms,I am sure they will post I am really glad you found us here this is the greatest place for support empathy and understanding The peeps are great in their honest caring and total support Post often and no worries you are not crazy Lyn.....use my AOL addy please if you email me

recovered former longtime anxiety and panic attack sufferer and helper of other sufferers but no training or qualifications in medicine or psychology, any remarks that may be taken as advice must be confirmed with doctor or other health professional

slstoots, welcome to hw, i used to have ocd alot worse than i do now, the cleaning became annoying to everyone lol. I got a lil better about it when i went to school and work. I didnt have time, i would be exhausted and finally after months, decided it was OK for it to not be clean 24/7. It still bothers me at times, but it took alot to get past it....lyn always has wonderful advice, and i hope you stay with us here at hw, there are some great ppl and support. Good luck and take care. shell" Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now, in this instant of time. From this moment onward you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed."Eileen Caddy

Lyn and shell would have a hissy fit if they lived with me while i was depressed I become like the total opposite of OCD. Hope you find the help you are looking for. *takes up stock in clorox and pine-sol* lol--Michelle

"...I dont want the world to see me 'cause I dont think that they'd understandWhen everythings made to be broken I just want you to know who I am..."--Goo Goo Dolls