Friday, 26 March 2010

The Act of Forgiveness: A Key to Healthy Relationship and Happy Marriage

"He is not the man/woman I used to know", are you confronted with this statement lately? A lot of relationships specifically married couples going through a difficult time of their marriage lives would definitely resort to coming up with this kind of account as the bond begins to damage itself mainly due to an unforgiving heart.The act of forgiving is something that most husbands and wives fail to endow with each other as pride and egoistic outlook stand in the way for absolute forgiveness. As the aphorism goes, "It is with a courageous heart for a person to ask for forgiveness yet, the one who provides pardon is considered noblest". It is easy to ask for forgiveness if you know you are the party who is at fault but it is even harder to ask for mercy if you do not commit any wrongdoing. These two have opposing circumstances yet, all roots to one thing and that is to ask and offer forgiveness.The concept of divorce now becomes a sensation in the world as some of couples’ way out from marital differences and issues are legal separation. Added to that, the marital connubial problem comes from both parties’ unwillingness to forgive and forget. To steer clear of fallacies and mistaken beliefs in forgiving a partner, here are the following lists of things married couples should do to let off marital issues, shun the idea of divorce, save the relationship and start anew:

When you forgive, you forget. The idea is indeed disheartening; you cannot easily forget a cheating husband/wife. This is a fact however, if your partner ask for another chance to prove his/her intentions, who are you not to give such pardon? Thus, when you say, "I forgive you", this line should be verbalized without a pain in the heart. What you speak of should mirror what your heart feels.When you forgive, you build trust once more. Again, the idea of trusting a person who makes a fool out of you is hard, so difficult that it breaks your heart by just thinking about the deed your partner has committed. However, you cannot go on with this forever and you need to settle matters to rest to avoid divorce and give your partner the trust that has vanished the day he/she allows the offense to happen.When you forgive, you give the relationship a fresh start. Forgiving means a whole new life for the both of you. It would not be easy to start life all over again yet; it will all be possible if both parties are seriously after in saving the marriage. You cannot wake up to a brand new day if your life is filled with cloudy and hazy outlook. Thus, a forgiving heart will be the only key to come to life and start all over again.A healthy relationship makes no room for remorse and hardhearted bearing. A heart who loves is a heart who knows how to say the words, "I forgive you; let’s start this one more time".