The People’s Cube: WMDs Aren’t WMDs Except When They’re WMDs

Comrade Secretary of State John “Swift Boat” Kerry today pointed out that, just because the chemical WMDs lately used in Syria are the same ones Saddam shipped there back when Bush lied and people died because they didn’t exist then, that doesn’t mean that they didn’t somehow become real during the interim. Because, Bush.

While the uninitiated – i.e. teabaggers, conservatives, and Republicans – may have difficulty understanding the logic of such a statement, we on the Progressive Left are, of course, fully and gloriously aware of how the Current Truth functions.

This elite awareness also comes in handy as we contemplate why it was so wrong for former president George W. >Spit< Bush to attack an innocent country after no discernible provocation and with no actual threat to the United Soviet States of America, and yet not only logical but imperative that Comrade President B. Husseinovich Obama take immediate shocking and awing action against the criminal regime in Syria.

In fact, it’s been pointed out that it’s likely that President Obama will be awarded another Nobel Peace Prize for the courageous actions he is sure to take over the next few days in ridding the world of yet another scourge and threat to American peace and safety.