Self-Destructive RIM Says No PlayBook Email or BBM Until Next Year

You buy a BlackBerry for BBM and/or email. RIM's PlayBook lacks both. Nobody wants to buy RIM's PlayBooks. So here's a jazzy idea from the Canadian HQ: they're not going to add integrated email or BBM support until February. Eureka.

At this point, is working at RIM so unbearable that they just want to implode and spend more time with their families? Is there an office pool for how quickly they can make everyone hate their products? Has it really taken almost a year to bring some of the most fundamental features possible to a tablet that not long ago pulled up its skirt and bragged about being able to play Quake 3? Email is a feature that requires a 2.0 operating system update? Email? Surely this nonsensical shit must have some sort of right minded explanation, right David J. Smith, Senior Vice President at RIM?

"First off, we have decided to defer the inclusion of the BBM™ application to a subsequent BlackBerry PlayBook OS release. We are committed to developing a seamless BBM solution that fully delivers on the powerful, push based messaging capabilities recognized today by BlackBerry® users around the world and we're still working on it."

Deferral! Perfect. Just like people who might have considered buying your mediocre tablet will probably defer and get something else instead. As to an explanation of why RIM has the tech and business acumen of a lemming? Uh, we're still working on it. [RIM]