Change It!

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Transcript of Change It!

Change It! A Simple Process for Personal Change Looking Inward Can help you become more effective in Life Home Work Family Friendships Hobbies Communities Simple! What would you change? Learn A New Hobby If it was... The 5 A's 1. Awareness 2. Acceptance 3. Assessment 4. Attainment & Action Plans 5. ACTION! Psychiatrists Beauty is in the eye of the beholder What InterferesWith Success? Fears Lack of Resources Lack of Skills Awareness Activity Pick the most persistent "Pain in the butt" Roadblock. How frequently do you think about or notice this particular challenge? How do you feel about yourself when you realize you are not living your life the way you want? IT IS WHAT IT IS Until you can accept that there is a problem, you cannot accept that there is a need to change. When you accept the problem, you can stop living in the past and start living in your current reality Accept your Past Life Imperfections Inactions Actions Results Failures Successes Losses Wins Loves Pains Strengths Weaknesses Health Illness Friends Enemies Accept Your Future Accept your Current Life Acceptance Activity Right Now I Accept My Challenge I accept that I cannot change the past. It Was What It Was I accept that the future hasn't happened yet.It may not be the way I envision it. It Will Be What It Will Be I accept that even today I am making the best decisions I can with the skills, and resources I have. It Is What It Is I accept that for me to make changes in my life, I will have to face fears, create new resources & learn new skills. I accept the Challenge. It Is What I Make It It Was What It Was It Will Be What It Will Be It Is What It Is It Is What I Make It! Successes Strengths Enemies Friends Losses Pains Weaknesses Inactions Illness Wins Results Failures Imperfections Health Loves Greatness Challenges Assessment Activity Where might this challenge have come from? What triggers this behaviour? What are some better actions I can take when the triggers arise? What blocks me from taking these actions? How can I remove these blocks? What skills or resources would help me make this change? What steps can I take to obtain these skills & resources Willpower - The Ultimate Skill...Or is it? http://www.simpleology.com/classes/101/lesson/12 Your Attainment plan will help you attain mastery over your challenge. Knowledge Skills Resources Ask An Expert Read a Book Google It Wikipaedia Take a class Visit the library Meet with other learners Meditate on it Journalling List Pros and Cons Phone Email Practice Take a class Try it now Watch a pro Ask someone to show you Shadow an expert Listen to affirmations Practice Practice Practice Try something similar Teach it to someone else Try it different ways People Friends Family Co-workers Experts Money Tools Affirmations Videos Teachers Time Space Books Courses Energy Challenge: Chocolate Addiction Sample Attainment Plan Knowledge Phone a Nutritionist Get my glucose & bloodsugar tested Learn about dark vs. milk chocolate Journal whenever I am tempted by chocolate Notice my body when I crave chocolate Read a book on food addictions Ask other ex-chocolate addicts how they quit Read labels on chocolate bars Resources Nutritionist Health food store staff Friends & family Scale Healthy Snacks in home & fridge at work Retouched picture of me thin in a hot swimsuit An MP3 affirmation "I like healthy food" to listen to each morning Books Skills Learn to check blood glucose levels myself Make quick healthy *and yummy* veggie snacks Practice looking at and smelling chocolate without eating it Practice going only to "safe" areas of the grocery/department stores Eat snacks at pre-determined times Photo family member who is relying on me to be healthy Visit a diabetic Money What if I need to deal with a craving or desire NOW ! ? ! ? Awareness Acceptance Action Plan Action Plan Triggers Feelings Thoughts Actions Results Afterthoughts Afterfeelings Attainment Plan Activity Brainstorm 15 Actions you can take to improve your skills, resources, and change triggers so you can successfully surmount your challenge. Brainstorm actions that you could choose when faced with a trigger. Separate your brainstormed actions into the following categories. Write a few for each category. Remove or Change TriggersNew Skills and ResourcesNew Thoughts and FeelingsNew Actions Quick Planning Process Items which are very scary/difficult for you put an "X" Beside them. Now look at the remainder. Decide which ones you can do in the near future, and make it happen! (for more on how to make the "X"'s less challenging check page *** of your notebook) Evaluation Process Evaluation Process Evaluation Process Comfort Rate each item according to the following:

1. I can do this, and I really interested in doing it.2. It is challenging, but I can do it.3. It is SO Challenging that I am unlikely to complete it. Value Rate Each item according to the following:A. Amazingly valueable! This will make a huge difference.B. Basic value- it will help somewhat.C. Crappy value - It's not likely to help at all. Put it together When doing your action planning process focus on the A1's primarily.If the A1's aren't enought to get the job done, then include some A2, B1, B2 in your plan.If those aren't enough to get you through your challenge, then look at your A3's. Go through the whole Awareness, Acceptance, Assessment, Attainment planning process to figure out how to make make one of those work for you. Anything with an A is worth the work!Anything with a C you can scratch out. Unless you intuitively feel drawn to keep it, then, go ahead and do it. Perhaps it will lead to a surprise solution to the challenge! Deep Evaluation Process Rate Each item according to the following:A. Amazingly valueable! This will make a huge difference.B. Basic value- it will help somewhat.C. Crappy value - It's not likely to help at all. Value Resources Rate each item according to the following scale. 0. I have all the resources I need available at this second. ($20 cash, pen, paper, english language skills)1. I have the resources but they are not handy.($500 cash from bank, skateboard in my basement)2. I don't have the resources, I can easily and comfortably obtain them through friends, family, a handy contact or a quick trip to the store. ($2000 cash, Brother can help with drywalling, A Grapefruit from the store)3 I could find the resources, but I'd need to stretch a bit to get them. (Phone a new lawyer for the first time, read some books, travel to another town to make a purchase)4. The resources I need are probably possible to obtain, but I really don't know how I would get them. (A Fruit bat, Laboratory Centrifuge, excrement from a tapeworm)5. The resources I need are impossible to obtain. (Private singing lessons from Elvis Presley, Antigravity shoes, Invisible time machine) Skills Rate each item according to the following scale. Rate each item according to the following scale. Fears 0. I have the skills right now. (Putting a band-aid on. I know english. I know how to use a pen.)1. I can do it, it is slightly challenging (wrapping a sprained ankle in a tensor bandage. writing the words to the national Anthem)2. I don't know how to do it. I could stumble through it, but I don't know if it would go well. (Making a splint for a hikers broken leg. Singing the national anthem in front of an audience)3. This is going to require a lot of practice, lessons, reading. If I tried it right now, probably woudn't know where to start. (Performing a tracheotomy on someone. Singing 2 different countries national anthems for a for a major sporting event)4. I know there are people capable of doing this, but it's so daunting a task that I don't really know where to start. (becoming a doctor or international singing legend)5. I don't think this is possible. (Creating a living Frankenstein monster. Using only my singing skills to survive a nuclear explosion from ground zero.) 0. No Fear. (writing the numbers 1-10 on a piece of paper)1. I can do it. Not frightening, but maybe not interesting either. (writing 1-500 on a piece of paper)2. This could be a bit tough (writing a letter asking forgiveness from someone I wronged in the past)3. I am uncomfortable with this. I will probably avoid the task, or not tell anyone about it. (actually mailling the forgiveness letter. Doing a firewalk.)4. This is scary. I could get hurt physically, emotionally or socially. (jumping off a 4 story building. Standing on scaffolding at the top of a high rise construction site. Coming out of the closet during your wedding ceremony.)5. Even thinking about other people doing it puts me in a cold sweat. Writing it down makes me shake. When someone else mentions doing this I have an uncontrollable urge to yell "Don't do it...it's suicide!!!" (Driving blindfolded, wrong way, on a major highway, at midnight, with the headlights off. Getting drunk then doing gymnastics on scaffolding at the top of a highrise construction site.) Bring It All Together First cut out anything where the value is C - crappy. Unless you intuitively are drawn to complete it anyway, it probably is a waste.Eliminate all the 5's. and B-4's. 5's are impossible, and a B won't excite you enough to overcome the challenge's of obtaining the resources, skills, or comfort to complete it. Having these on your list just creates stress.Any A3 or A4 or B3, find a way to make it easier. Probably through or adding some intermediate goals to get you closer to having the skills, resources or comfort to complete it.When all your possible goals are A's or B's and all the numbers are 3 or under, then you are ready to put them together into a plan. Backward Planning http://www.simpleology.com/login Begin at the end. As though you have acheived your goal Then add in the next step prior to acheiving that goal Add the steps in such a way that one step makes the next one easier. Buy vegetables Practice saying no Exercise Throw out chocolate Backward planning activity Write each of the items you've written down on a separate piece of paper. Arrange the pieces of paper in a logical order (Doing A makes B easier...so do A first) Write the list of tasks in order in your book Put dates beside each of the tasks. Ensure that the tasks are achievable by those dates. Sign the bottom confirming that you intend to complete these tasks in the alotted time. A-Team Thank You Partner Awareness & Acceptance Partner A has 3 minutes to share their challenge, some of the solutions they have devised. Partner B says "Thank You" (No comments at this time) Switch roles and repeat Partner Assessment & Action Plan In your own words, let your partner know you understand them by telling them what you understood their core challenge to be. Also share with them if you think there is something they might have missed. If you have some more ideas for attainment or action plans...go ahead and share that with them too. When your partner shares their thoughts with you, you respond with "Thank You". It's refreshing to have someone be honest with you. Just accept them as their truth. Avoid viewing their comments as pleasant or painful. Also avoid starting a conversation about the comments...just accept them and move forward. If your partner suggests an idea for your action or attainment plan, it's always your choice whether to use it or not. Action Activity Pick 1 task from your list that will take 10 mins or less, and you have all the resources and skills you need. DO IT NOW! Discussion Get together with your partner and share how the action activity went. Again use the format of one person shares, the other says "Thank You" Now Lets Assess the Action Deeper ...So why is it so hard for you? Success seems simple for others... Pick 1 challenging area from Maslows Heirarchy of Needs. Think about some situations that have made you aware of the roadblock. Do you ever worry that 'your problem' is causing, or will cause a problem in someone elses life? Roadblocks - List some ways that you acted, or failed to act, that caused your needs not to be met. Thank goodness your problems aren't splashed on the news every day! Assessment Action Trigger Cycle Afterfeelings Feelings Actions Thoughts Afterthoughts Results Triggers Congratulations! You just chipped a piece off that roadblock you thought was there for eternity. Don't let another of your roads be blocked by your own stopsigns. Change IT! It's your life so go ahead and . . . Your May be your key to success Change IT! Toolkit E-Mail Website A-Team Family Follow up emails will be sent in 4-6 weeks Contact me at Jason@mrjasonsteele.com Exchange Emails with your A-Teams too Or through groupwise Or By Phone: 403-506-4664 http://www.mrjasonsteele.com View the presentation again. Offer suggestions for improvement or for future presentations. Set up regular contact with your A-Team. Nominate a Team captain to co-ordinate meetings and send updates Share your wins & challenges with your team. Share the Online presentation with them. Or ask me about presenting it live. Judgement & Bias The first impression that killsgood communication Be Your Own Environmentalist Turn your parasitic dumping grounds into paradise orchards Stepping Fully Into YOUR Life! Why the world needs YOU! AwarenessAcceptanceAssessmentAction PlanningAccountable Actions RespectCompassionHonestyCommunication IntegrityHonestyRespect AccountabilityIntegrityRespectCommunicationConnection Under Construction Under Construction Under Construction Under Construction? You! Perfect as you are! Share the presentation with others. Meet in personConference callE-mail updates, Offer your teammates your skills and resources to help them move past their roadblocks. What areas of your life aren't working for you?What do you want to improve?