I Know You Care

Everything was going perfect in my life. Until I saw him, standing there and looking perfect. Everything would've stayed perfect if I'd never spoken to him, if I had just walked away from him.They say that good things come to those who wait. I'm getting really sick if waiting.

9. Red Hands

"Harry, I can't lie to him anymore. I'm not okay with it. You may not want Emmy to find out but she's my best friend and I'm not okay with lying to her. Whether you like it or now, I'm telling them."

Harry studied me for a couple seconds. He was sitting on the couch across from me, twiddling his thumbs and looking at his shoes most of the time. I've been doing most of the talking for the ten minutes he's been here. He hasn't really said anything, actually.

"I get it, I do, but I'm not ready to tell them," he finally said.

"I don't care. It's better to get it over with to find out what they're going to do. I mean, they'll understand. Niall and I were in a rocky stage, you and Emmy hadn't really been dating for long, and both of us had been drinking."

Harry was starring at his shoes but looked up at me. "I hadn't been drinking anything. I was going to the clubs, not leaving. I was fine."

I was shocked by what he said because the whole time I thought he had been drinking something. "Well, Niall is coming over at 5 and I'm telling him tonight, whether you're here or not. And if you don't tell Emmy, I will."

He knew I wasn't lying when I said that. He sighed and rubbed his hands through his hair. "Fine, you can tell him, but give me two weeks to tell Emmy and if I don't tell her by then, you can tell her."

"Deal. Do you have anything else to say?"

He continued to look down at his feet and bite his lips like he was think of something. "Yeah, I need to say something. What if Niall ends it with you? What if Emmy ends it with me?"

I was taken back by his question because I couldn't understand what he was implying. "I don't know? We move on, why does it matter?"

He paused for a couple of seconds again. "Well, I was thinking, if they don't take us back, maybe we should get together? I mean, why not?"

"Harry, you know exactly why we can't do that."

"No, I don't. If we're both single, then why not?"

"It's wrong. They're our best friends. We can't do that. Maybe later in life IF that happens, but it's wrong."

Harry stood up and walked over to where I was sitting and sat directly beside me. He kept looking at me and studying my face. "I know it's wrong, but if it makes us happy, then why shouldn't we do it? I really like you and that sounds awful because I do have a girlfriend and she's you're best friend, but I like you. I hate that I can't text you because I won't be able to stop. I already think about you enough, I mean, I just can't do it anymore. I want you, I don't want Emmy."

"I'm sorry, Harry. I want Niall. Please leave now." I know that was kind of harsh since he just spilled all that to me, but I couldn't help it. I was engaged to someone I love and I wasn't going to throw that away for someone I have an infatuation with.

Harry didn't say a word. He grabbed my knee and gave it a comforting squeeze, even though I think he was trying to comfort himself more than me, and left. I sat there for what felt like hours because I was torn as to what to do. I could go after Harry, I could runaway with him and lose not only a best friend but my fiancée as well. But I could be happier with Harry. But I could lose more with him.

I liked to tell myself I was 'tipsy' when I met Harry, but in reality, I hadn't had nothing but water that day. I guess it just made me feel better about myself.

My phone started to vibrate again and it was a message from Niall saying he was here. I replied for him to come up but before I could hit send, he had already walked into my home.

"Hey, babe, I figured I'd just let myself in," he said as he took a seat next to me and wrapped his arms around me.

"It's fine, but I have to talk to you," I told him as I scooted away from him. I figured it would be best to just get it over with rather than wait.

"Okay, go on then?"

I took a deep breath as I tried to figure out to say. "Okay, I need you to let me talk and not interrupt me. It's better to just say it and get it over with." Niall didn't say anything. Instead, he nodded his head with a concerned look. "A couple nights ago, we had our plans for our date night and you canceled them. You had been cancelling a lot and I was angry and I was debating breaking up with you because I couldn't take it anymore. It was killing me, I mean, a relationship can't be just texting and phone calls. That's not a relationship. Anyway, I was on my way home from this club that Emmy invited me to and I ran into someone. We talked, like all night. That's why I didn't reply to any messages, I left my phone at home because I didn't want to talk to you. He brought me home at around 7:30 in the morning, we just sat in McDonald's and talked non-stop. I told him I had a boyfriend and I told him all my problems and he listened to me. He said he had a girlfriend but he just recently started to date her. So, when we got to my house, he was fixing to leave and he kissed me. But I kissed him back. I know, what I did is awful and I'm not asking you to forgive me, but just remember how I was feeling with us. I'm so sorry, I didn't want to put you through this ever but I did and I can't take it back but if I could, I would."

I took a deep breath and looked at Niall. The expression on his face wasn't something someone can describe but if I had to, it was a mixture of sadness, anger, hurt, and disappointment.

"Who was this guy?"

"It was Harry. He didn't know I was talking about you, I never said your name."

We sat in silence for about five minutes. Him contemplating on what to say and me contemplating how to answer what he has to ask.

"All you did was kiss?"

"Yes."

And another five minute silence. I didn't know if I should say something or sit and wait for him to say something.

Right as I had built up the courage to say something, Niall stood, kissed my check, said "give me some time, I'll come back later," and left.

The minute the door closed, I broke down and cried for a good three hours. Not moving, not doing anything except crying.