Are you really dating him?

November 19, 2015

There is a huge difference between dating someone and seeing someone.

The word “dating” is being thrown around a lot. It’s a trend to say someone is dating someone even if they are seeing each other without being on a date. People are only hanging out and sleeping together, but tell their friends they are dating.

This is the slippery slope that will get you nowhere except the Danger Zone I talk about in my EGuides.

To avoid deluding yourself, you need to call it what it is. If you’re just having sex with him, say that. If you’re going over to his house to hang out, say that. If all he does is text you, say that. If he took you out once and stopped, say that.

Get the Prize Catch Dictionary so you know your dating terminology and stay realistic about what he is or isn’t doing.

Check your reality here:

1. If you’re seeing a guy, is it on a date he’s planned in advance?

2. When you’re with a guy, who planned it?

3. When you two eat together, who planned it? Where did you eat?

4. When you sleep with a guy, did he make you exclusive first?

5. When you text back and forth, is it about a date he’s discussing with you? An engagement? A marriage proposal?

6. Or is it chitchat that just deprives you of your beauty sleep and strokes his ego?

When you’re just being with a guy, hanging out, or sleeping with him — you are not dating him. Only use the word “date” when he is making plans with you and following through.

Don’t deceive yourself to say you’re dating someone when there is no date to begin with.

And if a guy is dating you forever, never making you exclusive, then no, he is not your boyfriend. He is just a date. He isn’t even a suitor, because a man is a suitor to begin with in order to win your hand in marriage. A man doesn’t become your suitor just to keep you on permanent hold.

Be unflinchingly honest about what is happening. Then and only then will the right guy step up, and you will save valuable time and avoid unnecessary heartache.

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Hi, The One, I met a guy briefly a week ago. He got my number through a friend and contacted me the next day to ask me on a date. I suspect I am one of a few…. Anyway, he messaged me a few times and has now proposed we try to meet up over the weekend. So no specific plans were made and I also did not help with any suggestions. Do I go ahead and accept a request for a weekend date by another guy?

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