Peace Corps in no way associated with Meta World Peace

After Lakers forward Meta World Peace was ejected from Sunday’s game against Oklahoma City for elbowing James Harden in the face, the United States Peace Corps released a statement assuring people that the two groups were in no way associated despite name confusion. The incident occurred after Peace was trying to pump up the crowd by viciously throwing elbows around. Coincidentally, James Harden’s face happened to be right next to his elbows.

“I swear that I didn’t know he was there,” Peace said. “Everybody fist pumps after scoring, so I decided to get creative and pump my elbows. It’s unfortunate that James’ face was there. It could have happened to anyone.”

Formally known as Ron Artest, Peace has lead an infamous career full of accidental mishaps. From the time he mistakenly ran into the stands, accidentally knocking three men out cold, to his thousands of accidentally-missed wide open shots, Peace has been building a rough reputation.

Peace used to also battle alcohol addiction, traveling the country with liquor in his water bottles, “spreading the love,” which is why so many people believed Peace to be a part of the Peace Corps. After Sunday, however, the Corps is ready to put all misconceptions to rest.

“Although our names our somewhat similar, we can assure you that we are no way related,” the Peace Corps said. “Kind of like that in-law that you have no blood relation to, but people pin you together anyway.”

When news reached Peace that his name did not qualify him to be in the Corps, he was very distraught. In an act of revenge, Peace vowed to change his name to Meta Red Cross to spite the Corps.

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