Are You Ready For a New Dog After the Loss of a Pet?

Ready For a New Dog?

Guest Writer: Eliza Jessee

The loss of a dog can be devastating. We spend so much time caring for our furry friends that when they leave us, we feel lost and confused. It may seem as though there is no other canine out there to compare with the one you lost. On the other hand, you might feel the urge to immediately start the search for a new pet, but are you ready for a new dog?

How long after the death of a beloved friend is it appropriate to “replace” them? How do you know if you are emotionally ready to bring a new pet into your life? These are questions that I have asked myself, along with many other grieving pet owners.

Have you allowed yourself time to grieve? When my first dog died, I had a very difficult time. She had been my childhood best friend, and I didn’t know how to sleep in my room without her comforting presence. My parents, in an effort to help me move on, rushed to replace her. Soon I had a new dog sleeping in my bed, which in some ways, amplified my pain.

I hadn’t had time to grieve. The memories of my old dog were still fresh, and I wasn’t ready for a new dog. This new dog, he didn’t have the same mannerisms. He didn’t have the same eyes. Looking at him only broke my heart. I wasn’t prepared for a change.

If you get a new dog before you’ve had time to grieve, the look and feel of the new dog will only remind you of your loss. You’ll be frustrated that your new dog doesn’t respond to your commands the same way. You must allow yourself time to grieve the loss of your old friend.

Try this exercise: think about one of your favorite mannerisms in your dog who has passed, such as the way that they greeted you when you came home, or a silly grin they had when they knew they were in trouble. What kinds of feelings does this memory incite?

If they are feelings of loss, sorrow, and heartbreak, allow yourself some more time. You are still grieving your friend and miss them tremendously. If they are feelings of love, joy, and fondness, you may be ready to bring a new dog into your life.

Are you replacing your dog? If your goal is to find a replacement for your dog who passed away, you will fail. You need to be ready to welcome a new and different friend into your life. You have to be able to love your new dog for it’s own quirks, as opposed to being frustrated because they aren’t the same quirks you used to love in your old dog.

If you feel ready for a new dog companion in your life, make sure that you’ve had time to grieve the loss of your old one. Remember that you could never replace them, but that you can build something new and valuable with a new dog. Only you can really know if and when you are ready to welcome a new dog into your life.

3 thoughts on “Are You Ready For a New Dog After the Loss of a Pet?”

I think of it as the new pet ‘replaces’ the gone pet in the space left open in my house, not the space in my heart.

I don’t wait. I’m one who wants a new love in order to once again give love to one who badly needs it while remembering all who have gone before. It in no way is a lack of respect but of love. We all have our own time table on this.

I understand what the article is saying, BUT I feel your never replacing a pet. You can’t replace a living sentient creature, but when you lose a pet it leaves a painful hollow void behind. Yes, you the individual need to be recovered somewhat and ready to fill the void. But you will not be replacing your pet.

I got my first kitten, Tachie, in 1974, her companion, Sneakers, in 1977. Tachie never fully accepted Sneakers, our first cats figured cats didn’t snuggle together, just how they were.

When Tachie died of liver failure, rather we put her out of her misery, it was so painful. I cried heart broken for months. But then I thought Sneakers would want companionship of another kitty even though they hadn’t played and cuddled knew they bonded. So we brought a kitten home. Freckles was a tiny kitten from a rescue. She was sickly in and out of the vet, Sneakers accepted her instantly that we brought her home, his first act was to pin her down and clean her ears! We had to put her to sleep after a year, she had feline leukemia, probably the entire time we had her, tho other tests were negative. Sneakers tested negative and was healthy and vet recommended it tho they were buddies as it was infectious.

Subsequent kittens brought in were all taken under Sneakers wing. We went up to three kittens, as well as fostering one for a while.

All were cried over and mourned as they passed. When my last cat was put to sleep shortly before her 19th birthday, I truly think she knew Sophie was waiting in the wings waiting to become my service dog. She passed mid December but with the holidays we decided to wait as we were going out of town. I wanted to bring her home before New Years Day, but it was difficult to arrange with the rescue I volunteered with.

This January will be Sophie’s 5th gotcha day, she’s going on 6 years old.

I agree with you, Cheryl. Pets cannot be replaced. I’m sure our guest writer didn’t really mean it that way. I’ve lost many pets, too, that I’ll always miss. It hurts when they go. My oldest cat is 20 now, and I’ve had her since she was 6 weeks old. I hate the thought of losing her. We lost 3 senior dogs in the past three years too. All 12 to 14 years old. I love that you call it Sophie’s 5th “gotcha day.” That’s sweet. Thanks for visiting us today, and I appreciate your comment too.

Jeanne Melanson is just an ordinary gal from Nova Scotia, now living in Michigan.

Her animal family has included 13 Alpine Goats, 40 Chickens, 20 Turkeys, 3 Vietnamese Pot Bellied Pigs, a number of Turtles, 2 Raccoons, 1 Opossum , her share of Cats and Dogs, and a Bearded Dragon named Shirley.