tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67450855210492833922018-05-05T17:52:29.278-07:00Gina DetweilerGinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.comBlogger699125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-58312076110765460692016-04-15T16:09:00.000-07:002016-04-15T16:09:00.346-07:00Half Pint Farm Weekly Garden Update - April 15th<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SazgnTX9tuw/Vw7M_FmkIPI/AAAAAAAAI-E/GYoVQbR4Ik4lmQNdZIPMh1bqhm7D2-aDACLcB/s1600/DSC_0203.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-SazgnTX9tuw/Vw7M_FmkIPI/AAAAAAAAI-E/GYoVQbR4Ik4lmQNdZIPMh1bqhm7D2-aDACLcB/s640/DSC_0203.jpg" width="634" /></a></div><br />Things are growing right along. And the chickens have adjusted to being penned up in the run. They also keep the grass nice and trimmed for us ;)<br /><br />Not too much to report this week, here in Central Oregon it's a total hurry up and wait thing with our gardens. So boo to that. The good news is that the beets are up-they're tiny but they're up. Planting seeds is such an act of faith. We put these tiny things in the dirt and pray and wait and hope, trusting that God will do what he does to make things grow. And outside of creating a healthy environment, there's nothing I can do to make a seed grow. It's a miracle really.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-yrbnY-qhCz4/Vw7NIPF2TNI/AAAAAAAAI-Q/DSurGgwvBUEt2zhK_U-N9C1SKrcCJTXdwCLcB/s1600/DSC_0208.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-yrbnY-qhCz4/Vw7NIPF2TNI/AAAAAAAAI-Q/DSurGgwvBUEt2zhK_U-N9C1SKrcCJTXdwCLcB/s640/DSC_0208.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><br />The blueberries are coming on strong, it's our second year with fruit-so this year we're hoping for a little bigger yield, we'd be happy with a handful of berries. I think we only got maybe 5 last season.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4NsyxnNfzlk/Vw7NFFDWF_I/AAAAAAAAI-I/OqLSAo5OGVAD3xrefutvCfeQoG5RH5HhwCLcB/s1600/DSC_0213.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4NsyxnNfzlk/Vw7NFFDWF_I/AAAAAAAAI-I/OqLSAo5OGVAD3xrefutvCfeQoG5RH5HhwCLcB/s640/DSC_0213.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br />And despite our neglect of these raspberries last year, they're back up this year. We lost 2 of the 3 plants we had over the winter. Because we failed to care for them. But. This year we'll do better.<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gnh9ct6YgoM/Vw7NL0U6X5I/AAAAAAAAI-Y/M6UW7mH9WkA6n5R5HBqmqghYwpWePda6gCLcB/s1600/DSC_0216.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-gnh9ct6YgoM/Vw7NL0U6X5I/AAAAAAAAI-Y/M6UW7mH9WkA6n5R5HBqmqghYwpWePda6gCLcB/s640/DSC_0216.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">And here is the glamorous set up we have just outside our bedroom. This was a great solution for us last year, and once it's warm enough outside at night we'll move this out with the green house cover it came with to continue growing the tomatoes before they get planted in the dirt. We follow the old timer advice around here, don't plant tomatoes until June 1 or whenever the snow is off Black Butte. Whichever comes later. Did I mention that gardening is an act of patience around here? Because it is. However, we've done it this way all along and end up with decent tomato yields, despite our short growing season.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XQbVTuLHzZU/Vw7NLf0b_DI/AAAAAAAAI-U/QEIQr_gPcvcmqJc8plSuk6PFcyU5VkbAQCLcB/s1600/DSC_0218.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-XQbVTuLHzZU/Vw7NLf0b_DI/AAAAAAAAI-U/QEIQr_gPcvcmqJc8plSuk6PFcyU5VkbAQCLcB/s640/DSC_0218.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br />And the kale and tomatoes are doing just fine in the sunny window.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b189TpRXQNU/Vw7NMOM0sEI/AAAAAAAAI-c/2yeBbEjMC_YqTRrdvKeZ6A7ZV-kM0v9aACLcB/s1600/DSC_0219.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b189TpRXQNU/Vw7NMOM0sEI/AAAAAAAAI-c/2yeBbEjMC_YqTRrdvKeZ6A7ZV-kM0v9aACLcB/s640/DSC_0219.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-p0dc7PFYeFE/Vw7NN9PO7TI/AAAAAAAAI-g/YT6AwV7byxI5ZRtc1xIXH7hbL_aZ5iQBACLcB/s1600/DSC_0220.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-p0dc7PFYeFE/Vw7NN9PO7TI/AAAAAAAAI-g/YT6AwV7byxI5ZRtc1xIXH7hbL_aZ5iQBACLcB/s640/DSC_0220.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br />And here's a few Central Oregon garden tips:<br /><br />Now is a great time to trim deciduous trees and shrubs.<br /><br />And by mid month (that's now!) it should be safe to plant seed potatoes, peas, radishes, turnips and spinach. Use a soil thermometer to be on the safe side, soil temps should be around 45-50 degrees for optimal germination. We'll get ours out early next week.<br /><br />Also, we keep row covers handy and keep an eye on the forecast for freezing overnight temps, so we can cover things in a hurry if we need to. Check Craig's List or Swap groups on Facebook for old sheets and blankets if you want to do this on the cheap. Even old buckets turned upside over tender plants does the trick.<br /><br />So along with general clean up of the lawn, and planting all the pretty flowers, the garden is getting ready to keep us pretty busy. Just the way we like it. :)<br /><br />Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-79538560811578271472016-04-13T15:43:00.001-07:002016-04-13T15:48:28.849-07:00On Pinterest and Mommy GuiltThere are times when I feel like all is right with the world.<br /><div><br /></div><div>Like when my kids are being nice to each other and peacefully working out who sits where in the van. Sibling love? That makes me feel like mom of the year.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gh50XAfk-CI/Vw7LeD5mRgI/AAAAAAAAI94/Z9RPE_6AWVoh1PGNlquLSP06VdmDeaP-gCLcB/s1600/DSC_0205.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="409" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gh50XAfk-CI/Vw7LeD5mRgI/AAAAAAAAI94/Z9RPE_6AWVoh1PGNlquLSP06VdmDeaP-gCLcB/s640/DSC_0205.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>But then, I hop on Pinterest. And all of those good feelings disappear faster than a clean house invaded by teenage boys.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>Pinterest, I feel like I need to drop you like a bad habit.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>Actually, it's not you Pinterest, it's the pins that barrage my feed. I don't know why they show up, but they have eye catching little graphics and headlines that say things like, <i>50 Things You Have to do With your Daughters, Why we Deleted the Internet at Home, 5</i>&nbsp;<i>Habits Every Mom Should Avoid&nbsp;and Why It Matters,&nbsp;1001 Prayers to Pray Over Your Kids Every Day.&nbsp;</i></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div>These aren't the actual titles of posts I've ever seen, but you know what I'm getting at. They are meant to be helpful. Unfortunately, sometimes they create more shame and guilt than their writers ever intended. At least for me.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>Here's why I'm sort of quitting Pinterest. (You have to know I'll still come back for recipes and home decor and silly pictures of pets doing silly things. And we're redoing two bathrooms this year. Have mercy. I need all the Pinterest inspiration I can get on cute bathrooms for cheap.)&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><h4>Pinterest opens the door to the comparison trap.</h4><div>A friend of mine lamented to me recently that she easily gets caught in the comparison trap. I can certainly relate, I look at some posts on Pinterest and feel like I will never measure up to be the right kind of godly mom because I don't pray those 1001 prayers over my kids every day. And then I feel defeated and I wonder why I'm doing it all wrong and why all those other moms are doing it so right.</div><h4>Pinterest won't ever replace real face to face relationships with others who encourage me to grow closer to Christ.&nbsp;</h4><div>We've been privileged to call a house church network our church home for the last three years. One thing that we love about it is that the way we're doing church right now leaves lots of room for life giving relationships. It leaves space and time to meet regularly with each other for accountability and to help each other grow closer to Christ. We ask each other hard questions and we expect honest answers. Those relationships are the ones I want to go to when I need advice, mostly because these close friends are usually quick to say they don't have the answers but they will pray for me, and often right then. That's so much more valuable than a blog post called&nbsp;<i>50 Tips to Being an Awesome Mom</i>.&nbsp;</div><h4>Pinterest places undue guilt on me over the choices I make as a parent.</h4><div>I know the majority of blog writers have no intention of creating guilt in the hearts of their readers. But it happens. Here's why-the enemy likes to create division among Christ followers. And if guilt trips will do that then he'll send us packing however he can. Even through well meaning advice articles.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>Advice on parenting and marriage is best found in community, in person to person relationships where you give each other the freedom to share honestly, and offer help when needed. Without a close relationship where you really know each other, a lot of advice comes across as a checklist. And unchecked check lists are really good at creating a deep sense of guilt and shame.</div><h4>Take it to the throne before you take it to the phone.</h4><div>My sister shared this idea with me a long time ago. It was from a book she read where the author talked about taking our problems to God first, instead of picking up the phone to call a friend, our mom, or whoever else. This was written long before we all started carrying tiny computers in our purses. This advice is more spot on now than ever. How often do I take my problems to Pinterest or a Google search or a text to a friend, before I take them to God? That should be my first move.</div><div><br /></div><div>So here's what I'm doing to help me avoid the comparison trap and bring my problems to God first:</div><div><ul><li>I've cleaned up my Instagram feed and my Pinterest feed. I no longer follow some topics or people because I've noticed that they produce a lot of guilt and shame in me.&nbsp;</li><li>I've prayerfully sought God about the difference between guilt and conviction. Guilt is a tool of the enemy, used to make me feel generally bad about something vague that I can't even identify. Conviction is the Holy Spirit revealing a specific thing that needs to change. If I can identify why a certain post or piece of advice makes me feel uncomfortable, then most likely it's because the Holy Spirit is poking at me to change something. If not, it's guilt and I'm not taking it.</li><li>And finally, I've taken time to foster life giving relationships where I can seek advice, and even more importantly, seek prayer when I need it.&nbsp;</li></ul>So Pinterest, I think you're awesome. I really do. I just want to use you mindfully and prayerfully, like any other piece of technology.&nbsp;</div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-39475462384431698712016-04-08T16:54:00.001-07:002016-04-08T16:54:30.361-07:00Half Pint Farms Weekly Garden Update - April 7<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-kM3164EDI7I/Vwg3zAB9-3I/AAAAAAAAI9Q/bs3jaIEADRoxn_mnE0CG-bVYzy6orOI2w/s1600/DSC_0203.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-kM3164EDI7I/Vwg3zAB9-3I/AAAAAAAAI9Q/bs3jaIEADRoxn_mnE0CG-bVYzy6orOI2w/s640/DSC_0203.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Spring has hit hard around here. And we can't hardly restrain our selves from planting all of the things.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">However, our short growing season and cold nights have forced us to practice much self control when it comes to planting.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Last year we tackled a garden expansion, adding a 10 by 20 plot to the four raised beds we already had. We were on a mission to grow lots and lots of food. It was challenging but it was also successful. So much so that I managed to put up over 55 pints of pickles and salsa, and 10 quarts of fermented sauerkraut and pickles. We also ended up with a freezer full of other goodies that we're slowly working through.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">It felt like such an operation that we affectionally dubbed ourselves Half Pint Farms. We are loving the results of our efforts at suburban gardening. We've got 1/7 of an acre, just a normal city lot. But we're on a mission to grow what we can where we are.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">So naturally-we're going to do it all over again.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Here's where we are this week:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">We finally put the chickens away. We let all 12 of the hens have run of the yard all winter, but now that we're ready to get the garden going they've been moved back to their run. But they kept our weeds down, and so this spring we've hard virtually zero weeds to pull. We did however, have a fairly large amount of chicken poo to deal with. So that's a bummer.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">The garden is tilled up where it was needed (the chickens did that work for us as well) and soil amendments have been added. We typically use our own compost, but it's just not ready this time. Our local garbage place has some great soil builder that we add and turn in to the raised beds and the garden plots.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Beets, lettuce, and carrots have all been seeded outside.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I use garden stakes with twine and a yardstick to make sure the seeds are spaced evenly. And in a straight row. Zac goes in behind me and makes sure the drips are set up in the right places.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bKbIdapGkso/Vwg3s7OnBII/AAAAAAAAI9E/rN_kZQyi8L07aUhYUBa3k1gZtfJJpW7NA/s1600/DSC_0199.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="425" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bKbIdapGkso/Vwg3s7OnBII/AAAAAAAAI9E/rN_kZQyi8L07aUhYUBa3k1gZtfJJpW7NA/s640/DSC_0199.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">&nbsp;The herbs are planted and growing well, along with some zinnias we started from seed.&nbsp;</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ET930Kba_wY/Vwg3tamPL_I/AAAAAAAAI9M/88nRCeSw6l80ETq64NAzKqzvMA72lTHWQ/s1600/DSC_0201.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ET930Kba_wY/Vwg3tamPL_I/AAAAAAAAI9M/88nRCeSw6l80ETq64NAzKqzvMA72lTHWQ/s640/DSC_0201.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Things are growing, but it's still pretty bare. We can't wait to watch those spots fill up!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-44sJMbRbGmg/Vwg36Si7t3I/AAAAAAAAI9g/PbbrIu3aRwYNtkoR0qJB9tSn24fbYV39Q/s1600/DSC_0206.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-44sJMbRbGmg/Vwg36Si7t3I/AAAAAAAAI9g/PbbrIu3aRwYNtkoR0qJB9tSn24fbYV39Q/s640/DSC_0206.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;">And inside, we've started tomatoes, kale and broccoli. They're all growing well and loving the sunny window sill. It's still too early to put them outside, but we're on the way!</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RGn74Od_gJo/Vwg35zmQO8I/AAAAAAAAI9c/m6b0sN6rjPM1ZXDKliV-hKNgkbaE2rgXg/s1600/DSC_0207.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RGn74Od_gJo/Vwg35zmQO8I/AAAAAAAAI9c/m6b0sN6rjPM1ZXDKliV-hKNgkbaE2rgXg/s640/DSC_0207.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">I'll be back every week, sharing what's growing and also sharing tips and tricks we're learning along the way. High Desert Gardening can be tricky, but it's not impossible! And I'd be thrilled to answer any questions you have as well :)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Happy Gardening this week!</div><br />Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-21214377278345856072016-03-29T12:22:00.000-07:002016-03-29T12:22:02.702-07:00Fight Clutter by Putting your House to Bed <div style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We recently did a&nbsp;kitchen appliance update, leaving me with a very strong desire to keep the&nbsp;kitchen clean at all times. Admittedly, this is difficult as we tend&nbsp;</span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">toward messy and no matter how many dinners I cook, the kids still need more food.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0NG-oHOt5ns/VvrVk7uopcI/AAAAAAAAIy0/ERm9o5H6CY8eEo0LAS_erlomecSPh6Bqg/s1600/IMG_6727.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-0NG-oHOt5ns/VvrVk7uopcI/AAAAAAAAIy0/ERm9o5H6CY8eEo0LAS_erlomecSPh6Bqg/s400/IMG_6727.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When we got the new appliances, the dishwasher arrived with a broken part. Thankfully, Kitchenaid is awesome and set us up with a service guy to&nbsp;fix it, unfortunately we had to wait almost 2 weeks for the new part. That meant two weeks of hand&nbsp;washing every&nbsp;</span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">single dish. It caused me to be a bit slack in my bedtime routine. Normally we're diligent and&nbsp;make sure everything is put away before we head to bed. But with hand washing we had a constant pile of dishes out on the&nbsp;counter. Interestingly enough, that pile caused more piles. Seeing disorder in one part of the house made me feel like allowing disorder in other parts of the house was okay. It's not. And I noticed that it created a&nbsp;higher level of stress for me than when the house is tidy at the end of the day.</span></span><br /><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The&nbsp;dishwasher is fixed now, and so we've gotten back on track with our household bedtime routine.</span></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Here’s how we simply maintain and fight clutter, every day:</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">General House:</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sometime between dinner and before the kids go up to get themselves ready for bed we spend a few moments putting things away. Shoes, backpacks, homework, books, and whatever else came out during the day all gets put in their proper places.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Kitchen:</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The kids take turns doing the dinner dishes so most nights the kitchen is pretty tidy by the time they go to bed. While they’re getting pj’s on and brushing teeth I usually take about five minutes to put the kitchen to bed. Here’s a quick run down of what I do:</span></div><ul style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Load up any dirty dishes and start the dishwasher.&nbsp;</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Rinse the sink and wipe it down with vinegar solution, then dry it until it shines.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Spray the counters and wipe down.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Prep any breakfast things that need prepping.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sweep if needed. (It usually does, I usually decide it’s clean enough to skip it.)</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Wipe down and oil the kitchen table. We have a butcher block top for our table, so it usually needs a rub down with mineral oil. This typically takes all of one minute and leaves me with a clean surface for breakfast.</span></li></ul><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I do all of this while I make a cup of tea. By the time the tea is ready, the kitchen is in order.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Living Room:</span></div><ul style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Put all books/magazines/papers away, to their home or the recycle bin.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Straighten the couches. The joy of wood floors is that we can easily move things wherever we want. The bummer is that things often move without our wanting them too.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Fluff the toss pillows. I don’t know why, but when the pillows are straight and fluffy I feel like the whole room is clean.</span></li><li><span style="font-family: inherit;">Turn down lights.</span></li></ul><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Along the way I ask myself if I want to look at this mess the next day. My answer is usually no, and that motivates me to take a few minutes to deal with the clutter that builds up.</span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Your routine might look different, but we can all benefit from the fresh start that comes when we put everything in order the night before. A bedtime routine for your home will bring peace and order in the mornings, which are usually the most frantic times of the day.</span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><a data-mce-href="http://www.followingsimplicity.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/bedtime-routine.jpg" href="http://www.followingsimplicity.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/bedtime-routine.jpg"><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></a></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Do you have a bedtime routine for your house? Share in the comments.</span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-24575388334252366782016-03-01T12:01:00.000-08:002016-03-29T12:11:13.132-07:00what being an adult really looks like<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5TSXLepLgh8/VtX0fhIY2zI/AAAAAAAAIqA/t4QG2s0OLqc/s1600/IMG_6623.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-5TSXLepLgh8/VtX0fhIY2zI/AAAAAAAAIqA/t4QG2s0OLqc/s320/IMG_6623.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Recently</span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;I’ve had these feelings come over me. I’m sure you know the ones. Overwhelmed. Over stitmulated. Just over. Over it all.&nbsp;</span></span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">Everything was too much. The kids were loud. The chores were piled up. Dinner was exploding on the kitchen counters. And someone had tracked chicken poo in the house. Again. It was in that moment, with sauces simmering, the oven groaning under the load of a heavy dutch oven, a child&nbsp;</span>practicing<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;her <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007ION166?psc=1&amp;redirect=true&amp;ref_=oh_aui_detailpage_o03_s00" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e06666;">wazoogle</span></a>, and another child complaining that she won’t like dinner, that I decided to go on strike. If I made a protest sign and paced the sidewalks in front of the house, surely they would get the picture and give this tired mom a break. Right?&nbsp;</span></span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">But most likely not.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">Moments like this, especially when they stretch longer than just momets, make me think that I need more breaks. I need time off. And it’s true, everyone needs a break. But I can’t really take my mothering hat off and cease being a mom. I can’t take grown up hat off and not be an adult either.</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">And that there is the whole problem.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">I’ve seen it on cute pictures when I scroll Facebook. I’ve seen it on t-shirts. Heck, I’ve even seen it on coffee mugs. Don’t make me adult today. I can’t adult. It creates this thing in me when I see this message pop up. It’s making me think I deserve some time for when I don’t have to be the responsible one, the grown up, the adult.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">This whole adulting thing is tricking us. At least it is me. It’s causing me to feel like I deserve to not adult. I deserve a break. I deserve time off from the hard life of being a grown up. But the truth is that I don’t. Not really. I signed up for this life when I decided to marry at 21 and start popping babies out at 24. I choose this when I signed my mortgage papers and then willingly took on all the bills that homeownership implies. I agreed to this when I choose the life of motherhood and grown up-ness.</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">I spent the last few weeks begging Zac for some time off. I kept thinking that if I just had an afternoon, an evening, a week (kidding about that, well-sort of) off I would be so much better at this whole grown up gig. And because Zac loves me, he tried his hardest to make it happen. But life threw us curveball after curveball, making it very hard to grab that time. I found myself praying about it, and not the righteous prayer of a fervent saint. It was more like the desperate, selfish prayer of an over-scheduled and burnt out mom. It went something along the lines of, <i>give me this time off! I deserve it! I just can’t adult!</i></span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><i></i></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">Admittedly, that wasn’t my finest moment. But just like God always does, he met me there in my selfish pity party. He reminded me if I was grown up about my schedule and how I planned my days I wouldn’t be in this desperate place to begin with. Because if I was mature and grown up and adult like about how I spent my time, I would have allowed time for breaks and time for margin. If I had that time, I wouldn’t be feeling so over everything and ready to hide under a blanket with a box of cookies.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">I needed to learn to be selflessly selfish.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">Allow me to explain. Demanding time off from adulting just because I deserve a break is selfish. But proactivly planning for margin allows space so that the requiremtns of being an adult don’t do me in. I was feeling like I needed a break exactly because I hadn’t been allowing myself a break. I had packed my life so full with plans and obligations and things, that I had no margin for rest and recovery. I had no room for things that fill me up and give me the fortitude to carry on doing this adutling thing.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.0px;">So naturally, I’ve been feeling like I can’t adult because I was worn out. I need to allow room for rest. It’s not selfish to plan my schedule so there’s time to do the things that fill me up. It is selfish to wear myself out to the point of burn out and then demand that my family adjust their entire weekend so I can have a day off.&nbsp;</span></div><div style="line-height: normal; min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><div style="line-height: normal;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">I don’t want to not adult. Because I am an adult. And I’m really happy about that.&nbsp;</span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-87552441806632287752016-02-16T10:38:00.003-08:002016-02-16T10:38:51.969-08:00that book I never finished writing <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zolwR-FWKLg/VsNrNXzUIwI/AAAAAAAAInU/_dm9pEVsEAI/s1600/DSC_0641.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-zolwR-FWKLg/VsNrNXzUIwI/AAAAAAAAInU/_dm9pEVsEAI/s640/DSC_0641.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><br /><br />Here's the bummer thing about diligence. It'll call to you to finish things you didn't really intend to finish. Or maybe, it's not that you didn't want to finish them, you just never got around to it. Like scheduling that annual lady parts exam. You know you need to do it, you just find yourself putting it off.<br /><br />It hasn't been that I haven't wanted to finish that book. It was that it felt like having uncomfortable medical exams done more than anything else. I didn't really find myself excited to be working on something that felt like so much drudgery, and I reasoned that creating anything out of that obligation would result in a product that was dull and lifeless.<br /><br />And then I set off to be diligent about things. I knew that this goal would eventually have me facing an impartial manuscript and I was okay with that. I was slowly getting prepared for that, even before the whole word about diligence came floating into my life. But it still felt like calling my OBGYN so I waited.<br /><br />And then one morning it hit me, a surge of inspiration like I hadn't had in over a year. Unfortunately I was in the bathroom at the time, which led to a bit of scrambling to move and get somewhere where I could start recording the words as God dumped them at me from up above. But I got there and pounded out over 1000 like it was nothing and I knew that God had called me back.<br /><br />So now I write. And yes, it's not always fun. I don't really know what he wants to do with this book, and I'm okay with that. I know that I have to just be diligent to finish step one and when it's right, God will lead me to step two.<br /><br />It's kind of like Abraham. Poor ol' Abe, who God told to go, but didn't to tell him where he was going. But Abraham was trusting and he believed God. So he set off, trusting God to lead to the right place. <span style="color: #e06666;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Genesis+12" target="_blank">(See <span style="color: #e06666;">Genesis 12</span> for the whole story)</a>&nbsp;</span><br /><br />Sometimes the destination isn't as important as the lessons that God wants to teach us on the way.<br /><br />So whether you're staring at a big unknown today, or you know you need to take a step of faith-let's just be like Abraham, okay? Let's just go. Following God is be a grand adventure. Sometimes adventures are scary. And so it is. But still we go. And always he meets us.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">__________________________________________________________</div><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">Interested in what that book is about? Read more <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/search/label/End%20of%20the%20Line" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e06666;">here</span></a>.&nbsp;</div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-59784455548620178192016-02-09T11:58:00.001-08:002016-02-09T12:01:01.149-08:00Slow Down Girl, Just Slow Down<blockquote style="border-color: rgb(59, 59, 59); border-style: solid; border-width: 0px 0px 0px 1px; color: #3b3b3b; margin: 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 1em;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><i style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times new roman&quot; , serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times&quot; , serif; font-size: 16px;">“Our cultural impatience runs so rampant that we dress it up in terms like “productivity” and “efficiency.” But what’s really happening is we are conditioning ourselves to get what we want&nbsp;</span><i style="color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px;">now</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times&quot; , serif; font-size: 16px;">, all the time.&nbsp;Such a mindset robs us of the lessons waiting can teach us, causing us to miss out on the slow but important stuff of life.” Jeff Goins</span><br /><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times&quot; , serif; font-size: 16px;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times&quot; , serif; font-size: 16px;">“We can do the work of God at a pace that destroys the work of God in us.” Mark Batterson</span></span></i></div></blockquote><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-S7TWwvYKHnI/VrpEyTZwYwI/AAAAAAAAIm8/FKxlbSZU_WI/s1600/DSC_0053.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-S7TWwvYKHnI/VrpEyTZwYwI/AAAAAAAAIm8/FKxlbSZU_WI/s640/DSC_0053.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br /><br />It happens to the best of us. And last week it happened to me. I typically pride myself on not being busy. And I think I've done a pretty good job over the last several years of ditching obligations that aren't needed and making my life a little slower and more intentional. I've shared it here, <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/search/label/intention" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e06666;">my efforts to be intentional</span></a> and <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/search/label/pursuing%20slow" style="color: #e06666;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e06666;">pursue slow</span></a><span style="color: #444444;">. Most</span> days this is easy.<br /><br />But then there are other days, when I run out of room on my daily calendar to jot down all that needs to be done. Last week I had a string of those days, and while I try really hard to balance busy days with down days, I failed in a grand way last week. It wasn't pretty. It wasn't fun.<br /><br />The irony of it was that I just received the book <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Busy-Peace-Purpose-World/dp/0310342228/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1455044757&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=breaking+busy" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e06666;">Breaking Busy.</span></a> I picked it up, not because I thought I needed help in this area. I picked it up because I was hoping it would provide continued encouragement to stay off the hamster wheel.<br /><br />We so easily take up obligations and jobs and duties that we just don't need to take on. I get it that sometimes life throws us things that just have to be done, like teacher meetings or work projects that stretch on and on. And there's even the fun things like coffee dates with friends. But all together they add up to busy, busy, busy.<br /><br />I know the truth that we can be so busy saying yes to all the things, that we end up having to say no to the most important things.<br /><br />So busy we don't have extra time to chat with a friend we run into at the grocery store. So busy we can't rest when are bodies are screaming for a nap. So busy that we fail to connect with loved ones.<br /><br />I'm grateful that last week wasn't my normal. But I'm also grateful that last week was a painful reminder that I have only so much capacity for busy. Just like my phone that regularly bugs me when the memory is nearly full, or needs to be charged; my body will tell me when I'm full. For me, out of control emotions and an uncomfortable sensation in my ears signals me that I'm close to breakdown. <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/04/every-life-has-it-limits-and-each-of-us.html" target="_blank">(I have&nbsp;<span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times&quot; , serif; font-size: 16px;">Meniere’s</span>&nbsp;disease </a>and stress and busy tend to bring out attacks of symptoms.) Your signals might be different. It's important to listen to them though, or we risk burn out.<br /><br />By Saturday I knew that I was beyond myself. It showed up in the way I talked to my husband and in the way I responded to my kids. So today, I'm taking a quiet day to quit busy and embrace quiet. Maybe you need permission to do the same? Let me encourage you in this my friends, take time to rest and recharge. You need it. And the people around you need you to take this time. It's just going to make you a better you. And a better you is more effective, kinder, more gracious. I like that version of me best.Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-60708638233617983322016-01-19T10:02:00.001-08:002016-01-19T10:02:51.011-08:00Lessons on Diligence<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VJ94vs-jDME/Vp54oqL0VFI/AAAAAAAAImc/JQi7O8YAPaM/s1600/DSC_0009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-VJ94vs-jDME/Vp54oqL0VFI/AAAAAAAAImc/JQi7O8YAPaM/s640/DSC_0009.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><h4><blockquote style="border-color: rgb(59, 59, 59); border-style: solid; border-width: 0px 0px 0px 1px; color: #3b3b3b; margin: 0px; padding: 0px 0px 0px 1em;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><i style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: &quot;georgia&quot; , &quot;times new roman&quot; , serif;">“The disciplined person rises courageously, even heroically, to meet life and conquer it. He resolutely faces his duty. He is governed by a sense of responsibility. He has inward resources and personal reserves which are the wonder of weaker souls. He brings adversity under tribute and compels it to serve him.&nbsp;&nbsp;”</span></i></div></blockquote></h4><br /><br /><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-family: proxima-nova; font-size: 16px; text-align: right;">— Richard Shelley Taylor</figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-family: proxima-nova; font-size: 16px; text-align: right;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-family: proxima-nova; font-size: 16px; text-align: right;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-family: proxima-nova; font-size: 16px; text-align: right;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;">Confession time: when God whispered the word "diligent" in my ear for 2016, I kind of thought I'd have it easy. I figured that I was mostly diligent, that I did a great job of sticking to things, that I was good with follow through. I had myself fooled. Big time.&nbsp;</figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;">Over the past few weeks it's come like a little nagging (though not in a bad way nagging) whisper. <i>Diligence. </i>As I pass by my kids' rooms and notice that they've cleaned up in hope of me making their beds. (A deal we worked out to motivate them to clean.) Normally I would keep walking, but <i>diligence</i>&nbsp;calls me to do the job now and do it right. When the workout has only 10 minutes to go, and I am tempted to call it quits. (Which I have done so often in the past.)&nbsp;<i>Diligence </i>tells me to finish strong. When a task is difficult and I'd rather ignore it, <i>diligence </i>tells me to do it now and do it to the best of my ability.&nbsp;</figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;">This diligence thing isn't for the faint of heart. Maybe that's because it doesn't look much different than discipline. Oh, we know it's an unpleasant word, but it's a necessary one if we're ever going grow. I'd rather grow, wouldn't you?&nbsp;</figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><br /></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;">The writer of Hebrews reminds me of this truth.&nbsp;</figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><i style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><br /></b></span></i></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><i style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:11</b></span></i></figcaption><figcaption class="source" style="color: #3b3b3b; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;"><i style="background-color: #fdfeff; color: #001320; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b><br /></b></span></i></figcaption><span style="font-weight: normal;">It's about the training. I'm&nbsp;learning that being diligent is about the follow through, that consistent steady effort that gets the work done with a joyful heart. I'm more apt to call it quits part way through. My default is to put certain things off until later. Or if not, then I'll do the work with a grumpy heart. None of that speaks to the diligent follow through that I know God is asking of me during this season. It's been an ugly revelation that in the past I'd rather choose&nbsp;anything other than diligence. Thankfully, God is graciously calling me to something better.&nbsp;</span><br /><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">I'm painting barns these days. And because I'm still new at this, I'm making lots of mistakes. But diligence tells me to keep trying, even when it feels like all I'm doing is wasting time. I've been challenged to paint the same barn over and over until I work out&nbsp;some of those mistakes. I'm&nbsp;learning that those mistakes aren't setbacks, they're simply showing me what I need to work on. Diligence calls me to come back and try&nbsp;again,&nbsp;learning from those mistakes.&nbsp;</span><br /><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">Because the result of diligence and&nbsp;discipline is a harvest of not only&nbsp;righteousness, but peace. I'm noticing that there's tremendous peace when I don't leave things undone. There's the fruit of rest&nbsp;because I'm not thinking about all the half-assing I'm&nbsp;prone to. Honestly, it's a lot easier to half ass things. But diligence calls me to something better, and to something with a better reward: peace and&nbsp;righteousness. I like the sound of that.&nbsp;</span><br /><span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span><span style="font-weight: normal;">God might not be asking you to be diligent in all&nbsp;the things like he is me, but I would&nbsp;challenge you to choose one area where you may have been lacking diligence in the past. What would&nbsp;change if you were to approach that area with consistent steady effort?&nbsp;</span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-58352792986082608812016-01-05T11:53:00.001-08:002016-01-05T11:53:26.756-08:002016-the diligent year<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div>&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8-lMooVSGOA/VoweEps7onI/AAAAAAAAImE/fcr5r3_mrIQ/s1600/DSC_0012.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8-lMooVSGOA/VoweEps7onI/AAAAAAAAImE/fcr5r3_mrIQ/s640/DSC_0012.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><div><br /></div>Wowzers. It's been awhile. My last post was in October 2014. Clearly, I must have needed a blogging break. But I've missed this place. I've missed sharing my heart. I've missed the connections I've made with readers. (Are any of you still out there? Does anybody even read blogs anymore?)<div><br /></div><div>As I reflected on 2015 I realized that for all I like to talk about intention, I really wasn't intentional in every area of my life. I think that's okay, but I was also feeling that uncomfortable God nudge that a few things need to be different this year. So I began seeking out what and praying for God's ideas on this brand new 2016.</div><div><br /></div><div>A few days after Christmas I was reading in Ezekiel when these words captured my attention:&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>"Mark well, see with your eyes and hear with your ears all that I say to you concerning the statutes of the house of the Lord and concerning all its laws...." (Ezekiel 44:5)</div><div><br /></div><div>God was speaking to Ezekiel about his physical house on earth, the tabernacle that was to be rebuilt. But those words "mark well" caught me. I found myself repeating them over and over. What does it mean to "mark well"? As I prayed about it I realized that God was referring to intention and diligence in how Ezekiel was to apply these words. The original language renders it something like this: "put, set, mark on your heart, in your understanding, in your inner man all that I say concerning these words." At least that's my interpretation, based on the original language.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>I began to pray about marking well in this new year. And God led me right to the word diligence. To be diligent is to be characterized by steady, earnest and energetic effort. That means I give my all to everything I do, from washing dishes to studying God's word and everything in between.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>The more I prayed the more I knew. I am supposed to be diligent this year. But since a year is an awfully big chunk, I've purposed to take it one month at a time. Because it's easier that way.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>January will find me being diligent in three specific areas: prayer and Bible study (specifically journaling), working on my art (watercolors and barns, oh I dream of barns and open fields), and with my kids, taking date time at least once with each.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div>I'm excited for what God has in store. I know he rewards those who earnestly seek him and that he is pleased with those who make the most of the resources they've been given. (You've read the parable of the talents, right? <a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=matt+25%3A14-30&amp;version=AMP" target="_blank">Read Matthew 25:14-30 here</a> if you need a refresher.)</div><div><br /></div><div>And to get the year off to the right start, I picked up a new Moleskine and made a snappy little cover for it. Because it's cute and makes journaling so much easier that way.&nbsp;</div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PraUL0Os0A0/VoweDk025RI/AAAAAAAAIl8/BQyBx8jA_No/s1600/DSC_0010.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="425" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-PraUL0Os0A0/VoweDk025RI/AAAAAAAAIl8/BQyBx8jA_No/s640/DSC_0010.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XlGPXssY408/VowemZk9VTI/AAAAAAAAImM/g-2mOMKXwU0/s1600/IMG_6506.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-XlGPXssY408/VowemZk9VTI/AAAAAAAAImM/g-2mOMKXwU0/s640/IMG_6506.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>So friends, what about you this year? What does God have in store for you in 2016?</div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-31464941892827205272014-10-30T10:38:00.002-07:002014-10-30T10:38:43.443-07:00how rest brings freedom<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uyGN1phCtaU/VFJ3ilmFB8I/AAAAAAAAHy0/9VovS2mQ_LA/s1600/rest.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uyGN1phCtaU/VFJ3ilmFB8I/AAAAAAAAHy0/9VovS2mQ_LA/s1600/rest.jpg" height="640" width="426" /></a></div><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It seems contradictory, backwards even. But resting really does lead us to victory.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The Israelites were fleeing from the Egyptians when they heard the admonition from Moses. When terror was at its height and escape seemed to be eluding them, Moses gave an unlikely charge: “The Lord will fight for you, you need only to hold your peace.” (Ex 14:14 KJV) Other versions render the word peace as “be still”. The whole idea was that God would fight the battle on behalf of his people, and he did.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">God has unconventional battle strategies for his people. He determines that we should fight, and he equips us with songs and words. He exhorts us to be strong and then asks us to be still and wait. There is great peace in the resting as we fight our battles and press on towards victory.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Rest does not equal surrender. Rest equals knowing from whom the victory comes. Because at the core we must realize that we do not fight our battles on our own,&nbsp; (the battle is the Lord’s) and when we do we usually go down quickly in defeat.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Also, rest does not equal a stop in our physical activity. When the Israelites were instructed to hold their peace they still had to move forward, away from the advancing enemy.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And so for us rest happens in our minds. The enemy knows that the primary battles we fight will be waged in our minds, over patterns of thinking and ways of thought that are contrary to God’s best for us. He determines to fill our minds with worry and anxiety, and all sorts of other things to busy up our thoughts. But the restful mind does not dwell in fear. Rest and peace cannot be found in anxiety. The key to entering into God’s rest as we fight our battles is to keep our minds free from worry and confusion.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Joyce Meyer reminds us that the secret isn’t really such a secret after all, the enemy is fully aware of the power of a restful mind. “Satan, of course, knows this fact, so he attacks your mind, waging war against you on the battlefield of your mind. He wants to overload and overwork your mind by filling it with every kind of wrong thought so it cannot be free and available to the Holy Spirit working through your own human spirit.” (Battlefield of the Mind, 84)</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">God offers us the irresistible opportunity of freedom, it comes looking like rest. It arrives at the mention of God’s word. And it settles down and dwells in the middle of our praise.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We can be free. We don’t have to be tied up with the need to control and be in charge. I pray that you’ve seen glimpses of that this month, and I pray that you have been able to see the light of freedom begin to dawn in your lives.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">He offers us so much, sometimes we just need to fight for it and claim the freedom that Christ holds out.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Friends, I pray we continue to do this. Let’s walk this freedom trail together.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">_____________________________</span></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This is the final post in a month long series about finding freedom from our need to control. Find the rest of the series <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a> or by clicking the button below.</div><div><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-INr62yVJv1A/VFJwKs4GmuI/AAAAAAAAHyk/leSJD6Dumt8/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-41767653357738804772014-10-28T11:14:00.004-07:002014-10-28T11:15:12.826-07:00how praise brings freedom<div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px; letter-spacing: 0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="min-height: 16px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DzvXSEoULwc/VE_bdotf5lI/AAAAAAAAHyI/m2ASY17v8H8/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bfind%2Bfreedom.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-DzvXSEoULwc/VE_bdotf5lI/AAAAAAAAHyI/m2ASY17v8H8/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bfind%2Bfreedom.jpg" height="426" width="640" /></a></div><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Last week we talked about memorizing God’s word in our journey to freedom from control. I had every intention off continuing this series sooner, but honestly, I’ve been stuck in the middle of the battle for control with a whole new angle. And the Nester reminds us all that<a href="http://www.thenester.com/2014/10/you-dont-need-my-obligation.html" target="_blank"> <span style="color: #ea9999;">the world doesn’t need our obligation</span></a>. We don’t put out lovely and inspirational thoughts just for the sake of lovely and inspirational thoughts. We do it because our heart is behind what we’re saying. This last week my heart was busy doing other things.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’ve been battling with my thoughts. There’s been some parenting issues that have caused my mommy heart to race and then my worrying mind to wander. It’s hard not to as parents. We see what’s going on in the world around us, or in our kids’ lives, and we worry.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’ve realized that lately I’ve been allowing worry to consume my thoughts. Worry causes me to try even harder to be in control, it tempts me to hold on too tight. Worry and trust don’t dwell together; <b>when my mind is worrying then my heart is not trusting.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I wonder how different the trajectory of my thoughts would be if I choose to praise God instead of focusing on the things that worry me. I wonder at how much more at peace I’d be.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That is the reason we praise when we are fighting our battles. Because <b>worry at it’s worst exposes my incessant need to control things. It causes me to focus on my own solutions and places too much pressure on myself to make things right</b> with my kids, especially in the particular situation we are walking through.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When I worry I try to control things. But when I choose to praise God in the middle of what I can’t understand then I begin to walk in victory. My praise reminds me of who is control, who is all sufficient to take care of my needs and meet me when I am at weakest. Praise shifts my perspective.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Before we can understand the value of praise in our fights, we need to have a right understanding of the nature of praise. Praise is giving God the worth he is due. It is normally done through song, but it can be spoken or written as well. The Dictionary of Biblical Imagery defines praise as “a response to the worthiness of someone or something. The psalms of praise celebrate and revere the worthiness of God.”&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Praise is simply declaring how amazing God is and how worthy he is of all honor and power and glory. Praise pulls our attention to who God is and what he has done on our behalf. It is a literal lifting of our eyes away from our situation up to God.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It is fitting that praise is such a mighty weapon for fighting our battles. The words of praise, coming from our mouths into space and open air, shift things in the spiritual realm. There is a reason that the demons reacted so strongly to Jesus while he was here on earth, they felt things when he was around. The Psalms tell us that God inhabits the praises of his people (Psalm 22:3) <b>Where people are praising, God is dwelling. Our praise literally makes a home for God. </b>Is it any wonder that praise gets the job done when it comes winning our spiritual battles?</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IqtwtZwvepQ/VE_c3nVyZ6I/AAAAAAAAHyU/SmXh8AHAM7A/s1600/choose%2Bpraise.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-IqtwtZwvepQ/VE_c3nVyZ6I/AAAAAAAAHyU/SmXh8AHAM7A/s1600/choose%2Bpraise.jpg" height="270" width="400" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;">______________________________</div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="text-align: center;">the</span><span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="text-align: center;">and putting</span><span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><div><span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Kn1E7KtB1t4/VE_XL0uKhRI/AAAAAAAAHx8/n-XActB45W0/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-4850183270792221992014-10-22T21:47:00.004-07:002014-10-22T21:49:06.939-07:00how to memorize Bible verses<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vKHdfBYNA_A/VEiIFDojHXI/AAAAAAAAHxs/QbGdvPmPSV8/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bmemorize%2Bscripture.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vKHdfBYNA_A/VEiIFDojHXI/AAAAAAAAHxs/QbGdvPmPSV8/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bmemorize%2Bscripture.jpg" height="400" width="266" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Don’t feel like you have it in you to memorize Scripture? You do. Memorizing anything is simply a matter of practice. Here are some tips to get you started.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Start small. Choose one verse that speaks to your need to control, or any other issue you’re facing. No need to commit to an entire chapter just yet, take it one small bite at a time.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Then begin by handwriting the verse, even multiple times. I pick up 4 x 6 cards to clip together with a ring clip, just to keep with me and rehearse the truth of God’s words.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Keep the verse displayed where you will see it often, and when you see it say the verse out loud. Something about this trick though; I find that after a week of having the verse up in a prominent location I just can’t see it anymore. It blends in with the scenery. It’s a good idea to move it around. Write it out again and display it somewhere else where you can’t help but see it daily. The bathroom mirror, the kitchen sink, the steering wheel, or even the lock screen on your phone are all great places to start.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Enlist a buddy. Everything is better with a friend. Having someone to repeat verses with and encourage one another along the way, may give you just the boost you need for success.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sometimes it helps to make a little song or rhyme. One trick I use with my kids is to say the verse one word at a time. For example, if we’re memorizing Isaiah 26:3 we begin like this: I say, “you” and the kids repeat it. Then I say, “you will” and the kids repeat that. We go on until we have repeated the entire verse like that, having said each word multiple times really helps with the process.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And finally, don’t get discouraged if you’re having a hard time getting it word for word. <b>If you’re working on it then you’re meditating on God’s truth, and that is valuable.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><b>God's word is our best defense against the lies that the enemy wants to keep us trapped by. We know that it is active and useful, so me mu</b></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><b>st actually use it.</b>&nbsp;</span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">A sword is good only if the warrior has the ability to use it properly. When David fought his giant he knew the king's sword was too big for him, and that he couldn't be effective with someone else’s weapon. There is a lesson for us there. We have to own the Scriptures, and make them a part of us in order for them to be effective in our own battles. The Bibles we own must be used. Memorizing Scripture is the best way to use the weapon of the Word.</span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;</span><br /><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">____________________________________</span></span></div><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div><div><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;">the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;">and putting</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><div><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-gBierzaG9kA/VEKMFiVzZNI/AAAAAAAAHxI/6xMClVNlNNM/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><div><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px; text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;</span></span></div><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><br /></span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-44996273732424948562014-10-20T00:00:00.000-07:002014-10-20T00:00:12.468-07:00why we should memorize the Bible<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Igjx86G5xwE/VESYiwZ22rI/AAAAAAAAHxY/calzbvcOjxI/s1600/memorizing%2Bthe%2BBible.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Igjx86G5xwE/VESYiwZ22rI/AAAAAAAAHxY/calzbvcOjxI/s1600/memorizing%2Bthe%2BBible.jpg" height="426" width="640" /></a></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">So, you’ve realized by now that you are indeed a control freak. That’s okay, you're not alone. Welcome to the club.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And what’s even better, you don’t have to live this way. God has extended his offer of freedom to all of us controllers; to those who hold too tight, micromanage, nag our husbands, hound our children, and insist that the vacuuming is done in perfectly parallel lines.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But it’s often not as simple as just accepting it. The battle for control is a spiritual one; one where the enemy makes every effort to get us to think that we need to run the show, we know better, and we can <i>help</i> God get things done.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Since this is a spiritual battle, we must fight with spiritual weapons. God’s Word, found in the truth of the Bible, is one of the most powerful weapons we have.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>The quickest and most surefire way to use the word as a weapon is to memorize it.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">There is freedom available to us, freedom from the strongholds that bind us, freedom from the chains that keep us stagnant, freedom from everything that holds us back.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">God's word is our key to freedom. It&nbsp;</span></span>unlocks<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;the lies, destroys the plans of the enemy, and leads us on towards liberty. It is life and protection to us, a sword and a shield.&nbsp;Here now is your reminder that you have the tools you need to not only fight the battle, but win it.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I have a hard time&nbsp;</span></span>remembering this truth.<br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">Daily I struggle, I fight on my own, or I let the lies of the enemy defeat me. I forget that I have a sure and steady weapon accessible to me. Most of the time I leave it in it’s sheath and I loose another fight. I’m awfully tired of that. God’s word is sure, God’s word is powerful, God’s word is my best protection, and God’s word is my best defense.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What does this look like on a practical level?</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When I find myself struggling with a particular aspect of control, I search the Bible for truth that counters the lie I’ve been believing.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">One verse that became my gateway to freedom was Isaiah 26:3. “You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.”</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">For me, <b>fear was something that propelled me to control my circumstances.</b> <b>Behind the fear was a lack of trust in God and his ability to protect me. </b>So when I feel fear and panic creeping in, I say this verse out loud.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When I first started doing this fear had locked me so tight that I was only able to whisper it. But as time went on, freedom allowed me to declare the verse-loudly and with authority. It is a declaration to the enemy that I have no reason to fear, and that God had assured me perfect peace if I keep my thoughts squarely focused on him and his truth. The longer I repeat this truth, and replace it for my fearful and controlling thoughts, the more freedom I am able to walk in.</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">/////</span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Want to memorize Bible verses, but don't know where to start? Here are just a few for you to chew on:</span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=deut+8%3A3&amp;version=NIV" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Deuteronomy 8:3</span> </a>for when we are tempted to do things our own way.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=deut+11%3A18-21&amp;version=NIV" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Deuteronomy 11:18-21</span></a> for when we see our kids struggling like we do.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=proverbs+30%3A5&amp;version=NIV" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Proverbs 30:5</span></a>&nbsp;</span>for when the battle seems never-ending.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+119%3A45&amp;version=NIV" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Psalm 119:45</span></a> for when freedom seems illusive.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+91&amp;version=NIV" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Psalm 91</span></a> for when we are afraid, feeling defeated and in need of protection.</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;">Come back Wednesday and I'll share some tips to Bible memorization.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">_________________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">and putting</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Y-PfrWkjL1A/VEKKJv7ni0I/AAAAAAAAHw8/w0tn0ZGh2KE/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" title="freedom from control" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-70166797874737599872014-10-17T09:17:00.000-07:002014-10-17T09:17:06.005-07:00how wrong thinking holds us captive<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-APwjeXmLyWQ/VEFALjHXdkI/AAAAAAAAHws/cM3RzAsuuLQ/s1600/renewing%2Byour%2Bmind.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-APwjeXmLyWQ/VEFALjHXdkI/AAAAAAAAHws/cM3RzAsuuLQ/s1600/renewing%2Byour%2Bmind.jpg" height="426" width="640" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I can remember the dark edges of <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/7-signs-that-you-might-be-control-freak.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">fear filled days</span></a>; the way my heart plummeted whenever someone got sick, and the room began to spin as fear descended down around me. It was a miserable place to be. At some point I remember thinking that my response was not a normal one, I was envious of my friends who didn’t seem bothered like I did. Mostly, I began to grow hungry for freedom.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I knew what the Bible said, that we are truly free and we don’t have to be slaves to sin. But I started to wonder if God had really saved me, why do I struggle so much?</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Why did it take years of me walking in bondage, in fear and control, before I realized that I already had victory assured to me?&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I had failed to understand that the biggest battle was happening in my mind. And as long as the enemy had me thinking I was defeated, I was.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>My problem was wrong thinking.</b> I was fearful and fear caused me to control everything. I didn’t realize the active role my mind was taking in my issues. And I didn’t fully understand the things God had done for me through Christ, so that I could be free from my wrong ways of thinking.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In Christ, I have righteous given me. It’s given to you as well. That righteousness is a rightness that comes not by anything we have done, but through Christ sacrificing his life. His death and resurrection purchased rightness before God for us.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If we are to find freedom, we must really believe this is true. Because the enemy would like us to think that we are a lost cause, and if we continue in that mindset we surely will be. But we are the righteousness of Christ.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">“God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of Christ.” (2 Corinthians 5:21).</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That is a truth that we must claim and declare to the enemy. <b>We don’t have to be held captive to his lies. We don’t have buy into the thought that we can never change. We don’t have to live as controllers.</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">God made us for more. He crowned us with dignity. It’s not just a hat we throw on when the weather is wet, it is a crown, fitting for royalty. Because that is what we are. We are a royal priesthood. We are sanctified children of God.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Too often we choose to remove the crown of dignity given to us by our Lord and Savior and replace the thorns of control and fear. We were made for so much more. And just as we choose to take off our thorny crowns and exchange them for a a crown, we get to transfer our skewed knowledge about ourselves for the truth of who we are in Christ.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Our own mind says we need to have order and be in control. But Christ says in losing our lives we find them. In letting go we find freedom.</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QlvX4hxuTdI/VEE3Zy9BbbI/AAAAAAAAHwc/Xa0FnY2pxUQ/s1600/replacing%2Blies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-QlvX4hxuTdI/VEE3Zy9BbbI/AAAAAAAAHwc/Xa0FnY2pxUQ/s1600/replacing%2Blies.jpg" height="270" width="400" /></a></div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">______________________________________________</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: 0px; line-height: 24px; orphans: auto; text-align: left; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;"></span></span></div><div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 24px; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">and putting</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 24px; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8rkwG4x_ziY/VEE1cFUM3FI/AAAAAAAAHwQ/fazmRqUL89c/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 24px; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-32519382448090236502014-10-15T15:12:00.002-07:002014-10-15T15:12:55.552-07:00truth for when you feel invisible<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-YPHlVYNrAkk/VD7wucXs3II/AAAAAAAAHwA/vz0vOcukJ_8/s1600/you%2Bare%2Bseen.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-YPHlVYNrAkk/VD7wucXs3II/AAAAAAAAHwA/vz0vOcukJ_8/s1600/you%2Bare%2Bseen.jpg" height="424" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Let’s keep it real. I have had such a hard time working through this series. It’s been a struggle; I don’t want to put up new posts, I don’t want to post period. It’s not because I don’t have the content. I have loads of it, most of it is coming from a manuscript that I’ve been working on.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And it’s not because I don’t think what I have to say is valuable, I believe it is.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It has been hard to blog because I have been feeling like no one is listening. Walking through these posts this month has forced me to really evaluate why I blog, and why I share. And I’ve realized one thing: <b>the enemy is a jerk and thief and he will do anything to get us to shut up and not share our stories.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The enemy is smart enough to know that there is tremendous power in the stories of how God has met us and saved us. If he can silence me from sharing what God has taught me, then the redemptive power of God’s story in me won’t make a difference to you.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I have toyed with the idea of not even finishing the series all together.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But then the emails slowly began to trickle in. They say things like: thank you. I needed to hear this. I’m struggling with these same things.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I have been reminded that my story matters whether I impact one person or ten thousand persons.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s hard to share these things on control and finding freedom because daily I am reminded that I have so far to go. While I’ve experienced freedom in many ways, there are many more ways where I continue to hold on so tight my palms have finger nail marks on them. It’s been a hard and long journey.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />But I believe in the power of God to give us freedom, just as much as I believe in the power of God to use my story to impact another person’s life. I don’t understand how he works, and that isn’t even what he asks of me. <b>He asks me to be faithful and diligent with the things he gives me, and let him use them to bring him glory. It’s not about glory to us. It’s about glory to God.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>So when you feel small and insignificant and like no one notices, remember that is just a lie from the enemy. God has a different idea.</b> If I write inspiring words that impact thousands, that’s great. But it’s no less important if those same inspiring words only impact three. That’s a truth that applies to you as well.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If you’re at home wiping bums and noses all day, if you’re stuck in a cubicle, if you’re running the cash register, if your husband doesn’t seem to notice you; you need to know this truth: God sees and takes note of you right where you are. <b>All he asks is that you are diligent to live your life the way he is directing, and then share his good news as much as you can.</b>&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">You are seen. And your story matters. Don’t ever think it doesn’t.</span></span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-47681999707954691772014-10-14T00:00:00.000-07:002014-10-14T00:00:08.712-07:007 signs that you might be a control freak<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We’ve come far enough in this series to see two things. First, <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/why-shouldnt-i-be-control-freak.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">it’s just not good to be a control freak</span></a>. And second, <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/freedom-for-control-freak-quitting.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">control is something that gets passed down through our family lines.</span></a></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rsfzmjL-OaA/VDwYUmM8lSI/AAAAAAAAHvw/EEco0OVSMxg/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bknow%2Bif%2Byou're%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rsfzmjL-OaA/VDwYUmM8lSI/AAAAAAAAHvw/EEco0OVSMxg/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bknow%2Bif%2Byou're%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" height="265" width="400" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Control is like a spirit that hangs around, bugging us and nagging at us. Eventually we accept our controlling tendencies without really seeing them, or without seeing how much of a big deal they are.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That’s where I was. I wasn’t the nagging wife you hear about, I didn't mind (too much) with messes at home. I wasn’t a helicopter parent. But I still hung on too tight to my need to be in control.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I also used to be strapped by fear. It wasn’t just an uneasy feeling, it looked more like panic attacks. Unfortunately, it was panic attacks over illness in the house. I know, it’s not very exciting or glamourous. But I used to be terrified at the thought of a stomach bug invading our home.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It took a couple of bouts of illness in the house for me to begin to see how fear was invading my life. At its root, that fear was just a symptom of a bigger thing. I wanted to be in control. When someone got sick, I lost that control. I was extremely fearful of that happening. I was also extremely fearful of a small child not making it to the bathroom in time, which only fueled my anxiety over things.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Realizing all of this was a turning point. But if I had been paying attention, I would have noticed other indications that I had issues with control.</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If you’ve ever wondered if you might have an issue with control, here some good questions to ask yourself:</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FgL_OEc1hpI/VDwVeixQ-UI/AAAAAAAAHvc/vSRhg6ALJ3w/s1600/how%2Bto%2Btell%2Bif%2Byou're%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FgL_OEc1hpI/VDwVeixQ-UI/AAAAAAAAHvc/vSRhg6ALJ3w/s1600/how%2Bto%2Btell%2Bif%2Byou're%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" height="432" width="640" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">If you answered yes to these questions, you’re in good company. Even better, the freedom bell is ringing loud. Do you hear it?</span></div><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’ll leave you with this picture: There’s an old Indian tale about two wolves. The story goes that a grandfather is telling his grandson about the two wolves that live inside of him. One wolf is good and righteous, but the other is selfish and evil. The elder explains that those two wolves are always fighting to get out and be in charge. At this point the young boy wonders who will win, the good wolf or the bad wolf. The grandfather’s response is simple, he tells his young grandson that the one he feeds is the one that will win.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><b><span style="font-family: inherit;">If we feed that spirit of control in our lives, control will grow. But we can starve that spirit, and allow the righteousness of Christ to take over.&nbsp;</span></b></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span class="Apple-tab-span" style="white-space: pre;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The process of ending controlling tendencies starts by simply identifying them. Ask God to help you identify how you’ve been controlling. But that’s only the first step. Once we’ve recognized that we have a stronghold of control in our lives, we have a choice. We can live with that wolf growing larger, or we can stop feeding it. We stop feeding it by practicing spiritual warfare. The rest of this month we’ll dive into that topic.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Thank you for sticking with me this far, freedom is calling, can you hear it?</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">/////</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">and putting</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-tYf0pn5XC9I/VDwVng5yImI/AAAAAAAAHvk/uzFUGOGrVQw/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-15710261602486729152014-10-10T00:00:00.000-07:002014-10-10T08:36:22.525-07:00parenting out of trust-not the need to control<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-v2f4Zyiylug/VDbVNSEzJjI/AAAAAAAAHvA/zcGfZIi-E1E/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bbe%2Ba%2Btrusting%2Bparent.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-v2f4Zyiylug/VDbVNSEzJjI/AAAAAAAAHvA/zcGfZIi-E1E/s1600/how%2Bto%2Bbe%2Ba%2Btrusting%2Bparent.jpg" height="424" width="640" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">As I’ve become more of a grown up, I’ve been startled by the number of grown up responsibilities that consume my life. The greatest of theses is parenting my children. It is hard, a sacred and holy work.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I never really realized how controlling I was until the kids started showing up. And I’ve learned along that way that a lot of my parenting has been based in fear of the unknown, unplanned, or unwanted.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We talked about that <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/one-question-every-control-freak-needs.html" style="color: #ea9999;" target="_blank">one all important question that every control freak needs to ask themselves</a>. Once we ask that, we need to figure to out what to do with the answer.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What does fear based parenting look like?&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It looks like not allowing time with friends for fear of what the friends might expose your kids too.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It looks like not granting the freedom for independence when they are ready for it.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It looks like not trusting them to make the right choices.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It looks like sheltering them, secluding them, running after them, and giving them no space to have their own time, their own ideas, their own lives.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Of course, wisdom is important in parenting. We have a responsibility to properly care for our kids. I’m not advocating a laissez-faire approach to parenting. I am striving for trust based parenting. As a Christ follower I know that God has the best of everything for my kids and he will give me the best of wisdom as I raise them. If that really is true the I better take God at his word and let him do the safe keeping.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Parenting out of trust means we pray that God will give our children wisdom beyond their years. </b>And we ask God to give us wisdom to discern what’s really going in our kids lives.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s releasing them to make mistakes, because you know they still have the safety net of home to fall back on. And then graciously loving them towards God’s truth when they make those mistakes. Parenting out of trust teaches kids how to get back up when they fall.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Parenting out of trust looks like allowing them to make age appropriate decisions because we know the truth of God’s word when it says he really does hold all things together.</b> Parenting out of trust believes that to be true and releases control to God. He knows better anyway. Because the last time I checked the Bible, God never really told his kids to shut up out of anger. But I have.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Being in control is a good thing, to a point. But being a control freak, especially when it comes to our kids, is very dangerous. It demonstrates that we don’t trust them. And it smothers them.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I love what Dallas Willard says about this. “We are always to respect other people as spiritual beings who are responsible before God alone for the course they chose to take of their own free will…We are not to harass them into rightness and goodness with our condemnings.” Of course, we’re not talking about two year olds here, we’re talking about teenagers and pre-teen agers who need to learn how to be adults.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The choice is clear, to parent based in fear or to parent based on trust? One leads to controlling and one leads to freedom.</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yo3BHUGgY2o/VDbYDenIpMI/AAAAAAAAHvM/BrpeWE21TOk/s1600/trust%2Bbased%2Bparenting.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Yo3BHUGgY2o/VDbYDenIpMI/AAAAAAAAHvM/BrpeWE21TOk/s1600/trust%2Bbased%2Bparenting.jpg" height="270" width="400" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;">/////</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">the</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">and putting</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #444444; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts&nbsp;<span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" style="color: #444444; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>,&nbsp;</span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-FTzKuNUm-lM/VDbSrOv_2eI/AAAAAAAAHu0/yrKVaUhheF4/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><br /><div style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 11px; min-height: 13px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-25518865248467755302014-10-08T21:39:00.000-07:002014-10-08T21:39:27.162-07:00one question every control freak needs to ask<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-8WE19d0cQBI/VDYROmtm7wI/AAAAAAAAHuk/Ge5FLZgz8q8/s1600/a%2Bquestion%2Bfor%2Bevery%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-8WE19d0cQBI/VDYROmtm7wI/AAAAAAAAHuk/Ge5FLZgz8q8/s1600/a%2Bquestion%2Bfor%2Bevery%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" height="640" width="424" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This post might be more appropriately titled: How not be a control freak when you think building a strong tall tower, moving out to the middle of nowhere, or raising your kids on a deserted island, all seem like good ideas.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">A wonderful thing happens in life. We grow up, and then we find a special someone. We say I do with the big puffy white dress on. And then we do the thing that creates children often enough that we actually create children. At least this the way children came to me. They may have shown up in a different way at your house, or in a different order. How they got here isn’t really the point.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The point is <i>help, I’m a parent and I just want to smother them for their own good</i>.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I fully admit here and now, for the thousandth time, that I am a recovering control freak. I like to do things my way, and prefer for everyone else to do things my way. I get strangely irritated when my plans get changed, or when the house isn’t clean enough. I tend towards nagging for no other reason than I want it done my way.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s not really fun to live with me.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Nowhere have my tendencies towards control freakishness come out more than in the parenting of my children.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I went through seasons where we practically drank hand sanitizer, because germs are icky and we just couldn’t get sick.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And my kids? They have the nerve to keep on growing up and leaving me to deal with pre teens and adolescence and all the confusing things that happen then. I strictly forbid them to get older, but they are naughty, naughty people and continue to do so.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They’re growing up, and it has caused a resurgence of my control freak ways. I get fearful. And I worry. I feel all the things until I can’t hardly pull my shoulders out of my ears because I’m all jacked up on stress and tension.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Parenting with your shoulders up to your ears is just not fun.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I’m realizing that parenting out of fear only propels me to control my kids even more. But parenting out of trust gives us all freedom.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Behind my need to control is a fear of what might happen to my kids. Its root is a lack in trust in God.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Do I trust the God that gave me the children I have to protect them when I’m not there? Because bubble wrap and tall towers are not practical, and they only teach our kids that the world is scary, or that mommy is delusional.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Do I choose to walk in trust? Or do I choose to allow my fear to cause me to control them even more?&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Next time we’ll talk about what fear based parenting looks like and compare that with trust based parenting. Remember the goal? We are chasing after God’s freedom in our lives, and learning how to let go to let him control things.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;">____________________________________________</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;">This is part of a month long series, End of the Line, quitting the legacy of control. We're after freedom here, not just for us, but for our kids as well.&nbsp;</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Miss a post? Catch up <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>, or by clicking the button below.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tRivc4gPksU/VDFhOtZgS8I/AAAAAAAAHt0/zK4AV36uf0c/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><br /></span></div><div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><br /></span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-90302348032513802992014-10-06T00:00:00.000-07:002014-10-06T00:00:05.231-07:00why shouldn't I be a control freak?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-H73tvcZgww0/VDIKEnkZHZI/AAAAAAAAHuE/5NAAr_-aPcw/s1600/is%2Bit%2Bbad%2Bto%2Bbe%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="when the need to be in control goes too far" border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-H73tvcZgww0/VDIKEnkZHZI/AAAAAAAAHuE/5NAAr_-aPcw/s1600/is%2Bit%2Bbad%2Bto%2Bbe%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" height="640" title="being a control freak isn't that bad, is it?" width="424" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">You might have noticed that I’ve already fallen off the wagon with this whole blog for 31 days thing. You're right. I have much to say about control, and about what God’s teaching me. Except I spent most of this weekend being a control freak and trying to micromanage my kids and my husband, leaving me little time to put this post together. It wasn’t a fun way to spend a weekend.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But it makes me think, is it really that bad to be a control freak?</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We know that <span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/control-is-not-boss-of-you.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">the need to control likes to boss us around</span></a>.</span> And we’ve seen that <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/freedom-for-control-freak-quitting.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">we often can pass that on to our kids</span></a>, and spread it down the family line.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Why is that so bad?</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Control isn’t actually a bad thing. It’s something that we need. From the time we’re born, we spend our entire existence ganging control. We grow, and as we do we learn to control our bodies in every way. That is good.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The good side of control is that we learn to operate in self control; however, control has an ugly side.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">When God created man he gave him the right to rule and reign. He gave man a job to do. It’s God’s design and you can hardly blame us for doing what comes naturally. Except the way we control isn’t at all what God intended.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">He does give us authority, but it wasn’t meant to be absolute. The problem lies not in control itself, but in our twisted perception of it. We were made to reign. However, we treat this God given privilege as a right and a dictatorship. That is never what God intended. We are co-heirs with Christ; that means we do have a job to do, but we don’t do it alone. We reign with Christ. Too often we try to reign over Christ and over everyone else.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The enemy has twisted my thinking. His sly way was to introduce us humans to the idea that we could be all powerful, all knowing, all in charge. That is not what God intended. He is the ultimate authority, but the enemy uses our desire for control to trick us into pulling authority from God right into our own laps. It causes us to say “we have this, thank you very much.”</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 16px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If you identify as a control freak, the enemy has twisted your thinking too.</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This whole control thing messes with our faith. As we try to control all the wrong things (people’s perceptions of us, our husbands, the chores, the PTO) we pull ourselves out of the hierarchy that God established. Control wants to place us over God. The issue of control is stronghold, a place where the enemy influences our thoughts and actions.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It’s also a matter of trust. We’ll get to that tomorrow.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CLHdGfzUX_Q/VDIah_feqeI/AAAAAAAAHuU/fp4vHKwHcss/s1600/controlling%2Bthe%2Bright%2Bthings.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-CLHdGfzUX_Q/VDIah_feqeI/AAAAAAAAHuU/fp4vHKwHcss/s1600/controlling%2Bthe%2Bright%2Bthings.jpg" height="270" width="400" /></a></div><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">____________________________________</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">This is part of a month long series on Quitting&nbsp;</span></span>the<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;Legacy of Control,&nbsp;</span></span>and putting<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;an end to our control freak ways. Catch up on the rest of the posts <span style="color: #ea9999;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>, </span>or by clicking the button below.</span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tRivc4gPksU/VDFhOtZgS8I/AAAAAAAAHt0/zK4AV36uf0c/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="200" width="200" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span></div><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><br /><div style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: 11px; min-height: 13px;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-55735897164686992042014-10-03T10:18:00.001-07:002014-10-05T08:24:55.432-07:00freedom for the control freak: quitting the legacy<span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It happens to each of us. It’s inevitable. At one point or another we will all end up being our mothers.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2aIxeWBAh3w/VC2caUkd1VI/AAAAAAAAHsI/N8-wnic3lws/s1600/legacy%2Bof%2Bcontrol.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-2aIxeWBAh3w/VC2caUkd1VI/AAAAAAAAHsI/N8-wnic3lws/s1600/legacy%2Bof%2Bcontrol.jpg" height="400" width="265" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Maybe you can remember the moment, or moments, when the words flew out of your mouth and you got a glimpse. It hits you with sudden, terrifying clarity. I am turning into my mom. It’s not all bad. My own mom is amazing; funny, creative, and a good mother in all the best ways.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But there isn’t a mother out there who doesn’t wish they would have done things differently. And there isn’t one of us who hasn’t cringed at the realization that the same tendencies we see in our parents have begun to show up in us.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It gets even worse when the mirror gets flipped, and we begin to see us in our daughters. That is the most terrifying moment of all. When they say things that sound a little too much like you. When the tone of voice and the position of the hip are enough to make you want a redo as a mom, only because it seems that all she’s picked up are your bad habits.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We pray that all the good things get handed down, and by the grace of God, they mostly do. But we also pray that the mistakes won’t get repeated, that our bad habits won’t be magnified in them.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That is where I find myself as a mom. Wanting all the best of me to get passed on, glossing over all the icky worst. Don’t we all want that?&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Unfortunately, there are things that get passed down that we’d rather have die on the family tree. In my own family, control is one of those things. It has become <i>the </i>thing for me, as I’ve struggled to gain freedom and prayed desperately that my somewhat bossy daughter doesn’t end up worse than me.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That is why we need an end to this line. The family line that goes down the tracks we’d rather avoid. Can we find freedom there? Is there freedom in the those places where we struggle; where we hold onto to tight, where we demurely joke that we’re just control freaks, and hope our daughters don’t take notice and copy our ways?</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We can end it. The family tree will inevitably grow, but we have tremendous power over the shape it takes. We have an opportunity to prune, by first allowing God to prune us-not just for our benefit, but for our daughters, and their daughters as well.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There’s this thing of legacy that we all fall into. Most of the time it’s good. But there are deeper things, darker things of legacy. This is where we break free. This is where we say enough is enough.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Freedom is calling. Will you answer?</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-rAl7XReBTHA/VC2Wh9byIPI/AAAAAAAAHr4/h5kLBo5AYJA/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" title="Finding Freedom from Control" width="320" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">If I could give you homework, all I would ask is this one thing: watch yourself this weekend. And then watch your kids. Look for those scary similarities. Do they remind you of anyone else in your life? Do you see traits from your parents&nbsp;</span></span>showing up in your kids?<br /><br />If so, don't be discouraged. Some of those traits are good, they are a generational blessing. But there may be some negative things as well. Freedom is available. Next week we'll unpack some practical tools to gain that freedom.<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;">_____________________________________</div><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Join me this month as we explore this issue of control and freedom. If not for you-why not do it for her?</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Miss a post? Catch up <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>.</span></span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-24568820889487721292014-10-02T10:19:00.002-07:002014-10-02T12:10:47.161-07:00control is not the boss of you<div style="min-height: 15px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hgbR0YDTCDo/VC2eSY_tBwI/AAAAAAAAHsU/CSsi1l907K0/s1600/stop%2Bbeing%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-hgbR0YDTCDo/VC2eSY_tBwI/AAAAAAAAHsU/CSsi1l907K0/s1600/stop%2Bbeing%2Ba%2Bcontrol%2Bfreak.jpg" height="640" title="stop being a control freak" width="382" /></a></div><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">Maybe it looks a little bit like being a perfectionist. Perhaps it's a little bit bossy. Or, maybe you simply want to control things, and you can't even figure out why.&nbsp;</span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I think we've all got a little inner control freak.&nbsp;</span></span>Unfortunately<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;for some of us, those little controlling urges are a lot louder than we'd prefer.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">Control shows up in so many ways. This month we're going to explore a few of those and begin to learn how God can bring us to his freedom.</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I saw it once in our daughter's friend. She ran just on the near side of bossy, and her ideas were always the loudest of the group. I overheard the conversation one day as the kids were&nbsp;</span></span>playing<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;and began to realize that control likes to grab hold of us while we're young.</span></span><br /><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">“Those bows go in the front. Both of them, they need to be tied in the front.” She insisted on it over and over. Our daughter’s friend was about to have a fit over the bows on my daughter’s dress. It was the fancy Easter kind, with a big bow in the back and a smaller bow in the front.</span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;</span></div><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My daughter joyfully wore the dress daily, as it was fancy and perfect for climbing trees. The trouble came along when one of the bows became untied and our neighbor wanted to help. Unfortunately her idea of helping was bossing my daughter about the placement of the bows. My daughter insisted repeatedly that the bow should be tied in the back, but her friend wouldn’t hear it.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This is what control does. This sweet friend thought she knew what was best, and she wasn’t able to hear anything different from anyone else.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>The nature of control is that it drives us to focus on what <i>we</i> think is best. It causes us to force our opinions onto others. And it drives wedges into otherwise healthy relationships.&nbsp;</b></span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This tendency to be in control, be a control freak, and boss others (or yourself around) isn’t limited to childhood friends. I see it daily when I check my lipstick in the mirror. It’s something I have chosen to wear for most of my life. And it’s something I have begun to notice my that my daughter is wearing as well.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">I know that it is an area that the enemy uses to pull me from God. I also know that it is an area that God wants me to experience freedom in. <b>Here's the thing about control: it&nbsp;</b></span></span><b>doesn't<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;">&nbsp;have to be the boss of us anymore.</span></span></b><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><br /></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The goal is freedom, and it is attainable. But it’s not something we do on our own, under our own efforts. Freedom is only gained by walking in step with the Sprit of God who leads us in our journey.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 15px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Will you join me on this journey?</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><img alt="freedom from control" border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-KAxyuXecGVc/VC2Br3YYzLI/AAAAAAAAHrQ/sUHnNcKCbPc/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" title="stop being a control freak" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This is part of a month long series-catch up <a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/09/end-of-line.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">here</span></a>.&nbsp;</div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-85224558391785795042014-09-30T14:39:00.000-07:002014-10-30T10:40:00.467-07:00End of the Line<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J20X84v0rnY/VCsV7AUS_pI/AAAAAAAAHqw/x01V3JY3c6c/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="we don't have to be the boss anymore" border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-J20X84v0rnY/VCsV7AUS_pI/AAAAAAAAHqw/x01V3JY3c6c/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="400" title="how to find freedom from being a control freak" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">It certainly happens to the best of us. One day we realize that we are indeed turning into our mothers. It gets even more frightening when we realize that our daughters are turning into us.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Though this is often good, as we usually aspire to be just like mom, sometimes it's just plain scary. For me it is scary when I see the same controlling tendencies that I hate about myself showing up in my young girls.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">We all pass down a legacy. Usually the things we pass to our children are positive and wonderful. But sometimes, those things are not so pretty.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Control is one of those things. We live it out, our daughters watch, and the cycle gets repeated.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">It's time to put an end to this generational curse. We can walk in freedom, and not just for us but for our daughters.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This month I will be joining with <a href="http://write31days.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">The Nester's Write for 31 Days</span></a> series to talk about this touchy and deeply personal topic.&nbsp;</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Would you join me? If not for you, why not for your children?</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">___________________________________________</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Catch up on all the posts here:</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/control-is-not-boss-of-you.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Control is Not the Boss of You</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/freedom-for-control-freak-quitting.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Quitting the Legacy&nbsp;</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/why-shouldnt-i-be-control-freak.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Why You Shouldn't be a Control Freak</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/one-question-every-control-freak-needs.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">One Question Every Control Freak Should Ask</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/as-ive-become-more-of-grown-up-ive-been.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Parenting out of the Need to Control or Parenting out of Trust?</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/7-signs-that-you-might-be-control-freak.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">7 Signs that You Might be a Control Freak</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/truth-for-when-you-feel-invisible.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Truth for When You Feel Invisible</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/how-wrong-thinking-holds-us-captive.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">How Wrong Thinking Holds Us Captive</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/why-we-should-memorize-bible.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Memorizing God's Word Brings Freedom</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/how-to-memorize-bible-verses.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">How to Memorize Scripture</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/how-praise-brings-freedom.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">How Praise Brings Freedom</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #ea9999;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.ginadetweiler.com/2014/10/how-rest-brings-freedom.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">How Rest Brings Freedom</span></a></div><br />Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-89925935863880623292014-09-30T10:15:00.000-07:002014-09-30T10:55:38.206-07:00heritage made new-saying goodbye to control<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6KV3qAcWrEc/VCrkxvc-uqI/AAAAAAAAHqQ/PdYge5bJ3Kw/s1600/freedom%2Bfrom%2Bcontrol.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6KV3qAcWrEc/VCrkxvc-uqI/AAAAAAAAHqQ/PdYge5bJ3Kw/s1600/freedom%2Bfrom%2Bcontrol.jpg" height="395" width="640" /></a></div><br /><br />Control is an interesting thing. I've battled with it for most of my life. I'm not talking about the good kind of control, like self control. I'm talking about it's ugly step sister. She proudly wears the hat labeled "control freak". And she really likes to run the show.<br /><br />Maybe you know all too well what I'm talking about. You know that unexplainable urge to insert your opinion, or to insist that things are done your way. You've felt that need to create order and maintain it all costs.<br /><br />Control is one of those things that grabs me tight, and it often keeps from trusting in God. In fact, it usually causes me to operate in fear.<br /><br />It's something that God wants his daughters to walk in freedom from.<br /><br />Today I have the privilege of sharing about the heritage of control over at <a href="http://www.echoesofmyheart.com/tww-blog/open-hearts-a-new-heritage" style="color: #ea9999;" target="_blank">Echoes of My Heart</a>.<span style="color: red;">&nbsp;</span>I met Katie at She Speaks and it was clearly one of those God moments, where you know he put you both in the same place at the same time for a specific reason. We have the same struggle and are both hungry to find freedom.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.echoesofmyheart.com/tww-blog/open-hearts-a-new-heritage" target="_blank"><span style="color: #ea9999;">Hop on over to continue reading about how our<strong style="font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;">&nbsp;heritage as servants of the Lord is not one of controlling tendencies, it is one of safety and security.&nbsp;</strong></span></a><br /><br />And then come back tomorrow for the kick off a month long series all about control. If this is something that strikes a chord with you I pray my story and God's truth will bring you freedom. Because this whole control thing, it's not just about us. It's about our children too.<br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GjaZamfPZb0/VCruizzUAqI/AAAAAAAAHqg/AbwtmtJUx-E/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-GjaZamfPZb0/VCruizzUAqI/AAAAAAAAHqg/AbwtmtJUx-E/s1600/end%2Bof%2Bthe%2Bline%2Bbutton.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-13953841205526468002014-09-23T10:16:00.000-07:002014-09-23T10:16:43.070-07:00for when you feel like a failure<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-z_XbNax08Qo/VCGp3gWnZdI/AAAAAAAAHpY/zZdJ85KSo3g/s1600/when%2Byou%2Bfeel%2Blike%2Ba%2Bfailure.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-z_XbNax08Qo/VCGp3gWnZdI/AAAAAAAAHpY/zZdJ85KSo3g/s1600/when%2Byou%2Bfeel%2Blike%2Ba%2Bfailure.jpg" height="640" width="424" /></a></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">When the world feels like it’s turning sideways, I am learning to take solace in God's word.</span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We have been hit hard with parenting issues these days, the kinds that make your heart wrench. The kinds of issues that make you feel like you can’t parent right and you have no business trying. The issues that stump you and leave you wracking your brain and your heart for any kind of resource. They are the things that make you want to run away, never to return.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I don’t have answers for anything. I don’t even have profound words for anything. What I know is this truth, found in Romans 8.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><blockquote class="tr_bq"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: inherit;">There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his son, but gave him up for us all-how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus who died-more than that, who was raised to life-is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.</span></span></blockquote><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">For when you feel like failure, like you can’t measure up, like you are unfit to do anything in this life-there is a truth of greater worth than gold. There is a truth that cuts the heart of our issues, slays our insecurities, and gives us the deep breath of freedom.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Parenting is tough. But so are so many other things; like marriage, careers, and managing life and everything else. And we have this enemy who wants to us to feel like we are inadequate, not enough, insufficient. In one small way, he is right. We don’t have what it takes, at least not on our own.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But with Christ? We have every resource we will ever need. We are not condemned. We are made free. We are made whole. He does graciously give us all things. He has chosen us.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">He chose me to be the parent my kids need, he chose you to be the spouse your partner needs, he chose you to be just right where you are. And he wants to use you there.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">Today, let’s not allow condemnation to drag us down. Today, let’s make a choice to embrace the truth found in Romans 8. Today let’s lean on the great interceder, who is always praying for us. He’s rooting for you. He’s rooting for me. Friends, we do have what it takes because God made it so.&nbsp;</span></div>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6745085521049283392.post-8361272731801108682014-09-19T10:13:00.001-07:002014-09-22T12:39:11.281-07:00intentional living: start small<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qI4jB2x-aNc/VBxjxJ3U7AI/AAAAAAAAHpI/vGCZSJ-6r5Y/s1600/IMG_3987.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qI4jB2x-aNc/VBxjxJ3U7AI/AAAAAAAAHpI/vGCZSJ-6r5Y/s1600/IMG_3987.jpg" height="348" width="400" /></a></div><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: inherit; letter-spacing: 0px;">The irony of my life is that I talk a good game about intentional living, but right now in this season, most days I have no idea whether I’m coming or going. I want to be purposeful in the choices I make, but I can hardly make it through the day without wanting to run away forever. My plans keep changing, my intentions are derailed, and it seems impossible to even get to the store for the few essentials I need.</span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">School started and we started homeschooling our sixth grader. Well, homeschooling is a bit misleading. We are more coach than teacher, as he is doing an online program that our school district offers. A few days a week he can go to the tech center housed at the high school and do his lessons there with the help of actual teacher who really know how to do long division.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Because the reality of this thing is that I spent an entire day Tuesday trying to teach him long division, all while re-learning it myself. Maddening is the only word that I can use to accurately describe our situation.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This transition from summer to school has been the hardest on me. I am reminded of my selfish tendencies on a daily basis, how I want to do things my way and I don’t like to get off my routine. This doesn’t go well with a student who needs help learning a whole new system and has a brain full of summer cobwebs to sweep out.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">What I need is a savior and his hefty doses of grace.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">And I also need the reminder that intentional living is not all or nothing. Starting in one area is still starting.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There is so much said about simplifying, or minimalism, that it’s easy to get a bit glossed over. It’s easy to get confused and equate someone else’s choices to live simply as a mandate for your own life.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">My intentional life will look all kinds of different from yours, and that’s how it should be.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">For me, the purpose of an intentional life is to live well, making the most of time and resources. I evaluate the things I do, and am quick to ditch what doesn’t work in my life.</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If thinking about creating an intentional life feels like it creates more burdens, then we’re doing it wrong. Pick one area where you can give more intention, maybe it’s diet and exercise? Maybe it’s something as simple as an earlier bedtime, if that benefits you.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><div style="min-height: 13px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"></span><br /></span></div><span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I can get so worked up about things that it becomes all or nothing. I figure that if I can’t be intentional and purposeful in every area, then I won’t bother being intentional in any area.&nbsp;</span></span><br /><br /><span style="letter-spacing: 0px;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Today my intentional life looks like making a simple list of what I’d like to accomplish and what I need to accomplish. It looks like lowering my expectations of what I want to do, putting selfish wants aside and serving my family. It’s simple, but it allows me to be fully present. And that’s the point of an intentional life.&nbsp;</span></span>Ginahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15231197848904182078noreply@blogger.com0