I’ve known this girl now for the best part of 10 years, but roughly four years ago I started developing feelings for her.

After a while, I decided to confess and was shot down in the spot, but we continued to hang out as friends and started to become closer and closer.

About two years ago we had a big fight because all our friends were seeing us always together and were pestering us to start dating. We stopped talking for a whole month her sister told me she got herself locked in her room crying for hours.

We started to go get along again, but it was not the same. At the beginning of 2017, I decided I wanted to spend more time with her. She didn’t want that much. But little by little we started hanging out more frequently, and I asked our friends to stop harassing us. They respected that and stopped.

Not much happened for the rest of that year, but in 2018 we became close, and at the beginning of summer I have had a massive depression from my work. When I was talking to her letting my feelings out, she said she didn’t let us advance or try anything because she’s afraid of ruining our friendship.

Since then she’s been treating me completely different from our other friends. Like when I do stuff, she always gets mad at me. She has a higher standard for me, and we started having arguments more frequently to the point it looks like a couple’s fight.

Recently a familiar friend we had told me when he asked her if she didn’t like me she said she didn’t know. When he pressured her to say yes or no she said no but avoided the conversation.

Here I am I like her I’m having a wonderful time with her. We go on walks, help a dog shelter, dinner. I buy her stuff, she buys me stuff, and I don’t know if I should continue perusing her romantically or give up.

Since yesterday I’ve stopped responding to her until I can get my head straight.

Vi, You mention a ” massive depression” any kind of heavy energy is bound to impact, significantly, upon other areas of your life, so do whatever you can to alleviate your feeling this way i.,e. yoga, long walks in nature, taking natural, alternative, safe (nonmainstream) antidepressants such as – Bachs flower essences, i.e., rescue remedy.. ..Rhodiola, etc

” When he pressured her to say yes or no she said no but avoided the conversation ” ..and I asked our friends to stop harassing us…”..our friends were seeing us always together and were pestering us to start dating…”

So what’s with all your friend’s input?

Unless you ask their advice they’ve got no business interfering in your relationship, they are, obviously, also, placing additional pressure on you as a couple.

“Since then she’s been treating me completely different from our other friends. Like when I do stuff, she always gets mad at me. She has a higher standard for me, and we started having arguments.”

Well, that says it all!

Seems to me best thing to do, at this stage, is back off with the heavy “Romance ” and remain, light-hearted companions, part of the general, bubbly, crowd.

Far better to be united friends than uptight, antagonized lovers. Once the pressure is off you both, things should fall, far easier, into place.