Self Forgiveness Is Essential For Healing

Until
we bring forgiveness to ourselves, we THINK we are cut off from The
Divine, Source, God (Insert the name you know It by.).
This false belief of being separate from our Creator is at the core of
all suffering and dis-ease.

The only way to heal this false belief of
being unlovable is to first bring enough love and forgiveness to
ourselves that we can then open to the Divine and feel the wellbeing
that is always available to us when we align ourselves with it.

Withholding Forgiveness From Ourselves Is Actually Motivated By Love

Many of us feel we’ve done things that make us unforgivable. When we
look deeply enough inside we see that keepings ourselves “unforgiven” is
actually motivated by love. We hold ourselves as unforgivable in hopes
that we never do that thing again because we don’t want to hurt anyone
else or ourselves. This is usually unconscious.

Although at the core this is a loving act, unfortunately,
withholding self love and self forgiveness causes us to feel separate
from Source.

Consequently we feel cut off from love, which causes us to
do things that are off balance, which generally have off-balance results
for ourselves as well as our Brothers and Sisters. In other words, we
end up acting in the very ways that we held ourselves unforgivable in
the first place.

This is not because we are “bad” and shouldn’t be forgiven. It is
because we carry the energy of “I BELIEVE I am bad” in our energy
field. By the Law of Attraction, we draw to us circumstances that reflect our assessment of ourselves.

You’ve Done Nothing Wrong

To begin this self forgiveness process, I invite you to look back on any
experience in your past where you are carrying guilt or shame. Look at
what your true intention was when you did what you did. If you look deep
enough you will discover that your truest intention was to take care of
yourself in the best way you knew at the time.

You may have had a
limited awareness of options and perhaps made choices that brought
yourself and others undesirable results, but you did the best you could
at the time. You need to see the truth of this for yourself – that all
of your actions came from a basic human survival instinct, which in
essence is loving yourself.

Source loves you just as you are, just as you ever were before, and just as you’ll ever be. And, since your Creator loves you unconditionally, you have full permission to love yourself unconditionally too.

From this perspective you can see into your heart and become aware of
the reasons why you’ve done what you’ve done. Do you see the purity of
your heart? In our growth process we can all look back and see how,
given what we know now, we could have done things differently in the
past. However, it is important to see WHY you did what you did and to
apply self forgiveness. It is time to let go of the burden of the past,
to stop beating yourself up. Once you do this, the power of forgiveness
will transform your energy field to a higher vibration and you will
attract much more loving circumstances and wellbeing into your life.

Even Extreme Acts AreMotivated By An Attempt At Self-Love

What I’m about to say may be shocking to hear, but I invite you to
keep an open mind and stay with me for a moment: Even when someone
commits as extreme an act as murder, if they are able to look back and
see deeply into their motives at the time, they will see that at the
time the act was committed, they honestly believed it would make their
situation better. It was an attempt to take care of (love) themselves
the only way that they could see at the time. This is true for all of
us, for all of our actions. Really check this out for yourself.

I’m not encouraging or condoning any act that causes suffering
for another being or ourselves. I’m just bringing awareness to the fact
that anything that we’ve done is forgivable when we truly look deeply
and honestly into our hearts, and see that at our core our actions are
innately motivated by the desire to love ourselves as best we can.

Forgiveness Isn’t Even An Issue From The Perspective Of Our Creator

Until you learn how to forgive yourself, it can feel like God hasn’t
forgiven you. However, this feeling of separation is actually an
illusion. The division only occurs in our own mind. We unconsciously
separate ourselves from Source because WE think we are unlovable, not
because It has pronounced us so.

To experience self forgiveness, I invite you to see yourself
through the unconditionally loving eyes of your Creator. There is
nothing you can do that would keep you out of God’s heart. In fact, from
the perspective of Source, forgiveness isn’t even an issue because
you’ve done nothing wrong. We are all learning and growing and we act in
accordance with whatever stage of growth we are on at the time.

The only reason we even have the concept of forgiveness is
because WE think we’ve done something wrong. Therefore it is only US
that needs to forgive ourselves.

Source is like a sun, shining on all. We need to see ourselves
and love ourselves as our Creator sees us and loves us: unconditionally.
See the thing that you did, see your motivations at the time, find the
place at the core where you were acting from what you thought was best
at the time, given your awareness at the time. See that, love yourself,
and forgive yourself.

The Door To The Divine Opens Once We Open The Door To Ourselves

Once we use self forgiveness, our inner door to love opens. It’s really
quite magical. We are now able to feel the Universal love and wellbeing
that has been waiting beyond the door that we had kept closed within
ourselves for so long. In truth, we’ve always had access to this healing
love, but holding ourselves hostage by our self judgment kept us from
FEELING it. It is quite a delicious relief to feel the warmth washing in
as we open to our own compassion and self forgiveness.

Start Where You Feel Shame Or Guilt

In learning how to forgive yourself, first work on the obvious areas in
your life, experiences that you’ve had in your past which bring up
feelings of shame or guilt. As you work on those, you’ll become aware of
other, more subtle ways that you withhold love from yourself, judge
yourself, and keep yourself separate from God.

As children, many of us were judged
when we rocked the boat of our caregivers. Their own self-judgments
were projected onto us. This is very common. However, these judgments
had nothing to do with who we are.

We tend to form ideas about ourselves from the way that other
people respond to us. This is true whether their response actually had
anything to do with us or not. As young children we were too young to
question the validity of these assumptions we made about ourselves based
on the responses of those around us. Eventually we began to feel that
we were “bad,” wrong, or somehow messed up at the core. This is the core
wound.

Now that you’re aware of this dynamic, watch for the signs of it
in your daily life. Become aware of times when something happens that
triggers you into feeling “bad,” wrong, not good enough, not smart
enough, powerless, etc. Watch the things you tell yourself about
yourself.

Our work is to bring awareness, love, and self forgiveness to
all of these places inside ourselves. We need to travel to the place of
the original wounding in our feeling memory and see that the negative
ideas we adopted about ourselves are simply not true. We are unique,
wonderful, and entirely loveable just as we are now and just as we were
then.

More Subtle Layers Will Continue To Reveal Themselves For Self Forgiveness

As these judgments and negative beliefs about yourself
come up, check into your heart and see the truth– the
purity of your heart and your core intention to bring love to yourself.
Apply self understanding and self forgiveness for:

All the things you were judged for as a child and still judge yourself for now.

Having so-called “negative” feelings such as fear, anger, hurt.
All “negative” feelings are the direct result of things that
happened to you. You are not “bad” or wrong for having them. Feelings
are the natural, healthy response to events. What ISN’T healthy is
suppressing and judging them and yourself for having them.

Not fitting someone else’s idea of how you should be.

Being exactly as you are – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually – in your wonderfully unique way.

Punishment and other traumas you experienced.
Receiving punishment and experiencing other challenging events does not mean you made a “mistake” or that you are “bad.”

Making “mistakes” as you learn, increase in awareness and
evolve. There are no “mistakes” from the viewpoint of your Creator.
There are only “learning events.”

Self Forgiveness Opens The Door To Abundance

As we open the door to receive forgiveness from ourselves, we open the door to all forms of abundance
and wellbeing. It all comes through the same “doorway.” This includes
not only a love for ourselves, but loving connections and appreciation
from other people, fulfilling experiences, avenues of expression for
your unique gifts, money, etc.

Self forgiveness completely changes your energy field. As you
begin practicing it, you align yourself with a higher, more loving
Source of energy. Then, by the Law of Attraction,
as you are more loving toward yourself, you draw in circumstances and
people who are ALSO more loving toward you. The outer reflects the
inner.

The Only Person We Really Ever Forgive Is Ourselves

We can’t give what we don’t have. If we withhold love from others, it
is because we are withholding it from ourselves. If we are withholding
it from ourselves, it is because we haven’t fully forgiven ourselves
yet. This step is absolutely essential before we can truly forgive and
love anyone else.

“You are not guilty of any sin, my brother. But you believe that you are. And while you believe this, you will need forgiveness. It is the only way out of your self-imposed illusion.”

~ Paul Ferrini, Love Without Conditions

Self forgiveness completely changes your “outer” reality.
Whatever is in our internal reality gets projected into our “outer”
life. Whenever I have a conflict with someone, that conflict is really
only with me. The other person is playing the role of a voice in my
head.

When you notice that you are withholding love from someone else,
notice why. Then see how you withhold love from yourself for the very
same reason. Whenever I judge someone, I’m only judging the part of me
that they are reflecting.

Usually what I’m judging is a part of myself
that was shamed when I was a child. For instance, if you showed
self-expression or power as a child and it was threatening to your
parents, then chances are you got shamed for it and have issues about
self-empowerment as an adult. Consequently, when you’re around people
who stand fully in their power in a healthy way and/or use their power
in an “unhealed” way to coerce others, there is a good chance you will
judge them because you were shamed for having ANY power.

See how this works?

So, when you bring love and self forgiveness to the place in you
that was shamed as a child for being powerful, your dynamic with other
people in power changes. You will feel much less threatened by them and
therefore less inclined to judge them. Forgiving them comes as a natural
result of forgiving yourself.

Choosing The Power Of Forgiveness Is An Ongoing Practice

Self love and self forgiveness doesn’t just happen once and then we are
healed finally and permanently. We have to choose it again and again in
our lives as new layers of our being become unveiled for our healing. We
have to keep doing our part. Each time we choose love, we open our
inner door to our Creator and feel our alignment with the vast,
unlimited energy field of light, love, compassion, forgiveness, healing
and wellbeing that is always here and available to us, and in fact, IS
us!

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