THIS IS MY BLOG. AS A RULE YOU WILL SEE MANY JOKES AND PICTURES POSTED. I EXPRESS MY THOUGHTS. I HAVE THAT RIGHT STILL YET IN THIS NATION.
NEW RULES STARTING NOW ON THIS BLOG YOU MAY ATTACK ME. LEAVE ANY COMMENT YOU WANT DIRECTED AT ME. YOUR FREE TO EXPRESS YOURSELF. I WILL NOT DELETE IT.
HOWEVER IF YOU CROSS THE LINE AND ATTACK MY FAMILY IN A COMMENT I WILL DELETE THAT COMMENT. I HOPE THIS IS NOW UNDERSTOOD.
(Please accompany your Children while here this is still an adult humor blog)

Friday, May 26, 2006

Odds and Ends.

This is the odd in my odds and ends today. I found this at Blog explosion from a gentleman "SOme you you may have come across the person, or if she is in fact, a troll, and may have recieved a rude comment. Apparently she is "cleaning" the internet from bad grammar and rude blogs"This is the Gentlemans site.http://www.bronxbloggers.blogspot.comthat was quite upset about some comments she/he/it had left at his site.Having my snes of humor I had to see what the fuss was about. What I found was

Trollmeister"You're probably here cos you saw one of my comments. If it was on your site and didn't include the F word, consider your blog a success. If you don't have a trollmeister comment on your site yet, I probably haven't visited. "TrollmeisterVisit if you dare.

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+A listener called the disc jockey on the air at our radio station toaskabout the upcoming lunar eclipse. "The eclipse can be seen at 1:30 inthe morning," the DJ told her. "That late?" she snapped. "Why can'ttheyschedule these things earlier so kids can enjoy them too?"

~~#~~#~~#~~#~~~#~~~#

A Somewhat Improved Glossary of Your PC's Messages

By Kevin Pease

It says: "Press Any Key"It means: "Press any key you like but I'm not moving."

It says: "Cannot read from drive D:...."It means: "... However, if you put the CD in right side up..."

It says: "Please Wait...."It means: "... Indefinitely."

It says: "Directory does not exist...."It means: ".... any more. Whoops."

It says: "The application caused an error. Choose Ignore or Close." Itmeans: "....Makes no difference to me, you're still not getting yourwork back."+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+Our national parks have millions of visitors a year, soyou can imagine that rangers get some rather bizarreinquiries and comments. Here's a sampling:"Where do you keep the animals at night?""Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid buildingtrails that go uphill.""A deer came into my camp and stole my bag of pickles.Is there a way I can get reimbursed?""The place where trails do not exist are not well marked." "There aretoo many rocks in the mountains."

~~#~~#~~#~~#~~~#~~~#A pair of chickens walk into a public library, find the librarian andsay, 'Buk Buk BUK.' The librarian decides that the chickens want threebooks, and promptly gives them some. Without further ado, the chickenswalk out.

Around midday, the two chickens are back and looking quite annoyed. Oneleans over to the librarian and says,' Buk Buk BuKKOOK!' The librariandecides that the chickens want another three books and promptly givesthem some more. The chickens leave as before.

About an hour later the two birds march in, approach the librarian,looking very angry now and nearly shouting, 'Buk Buk Buk BukBukkooook!'

The librarian is now starting to get worried about where all her stockis going. She decides to give them more books but also to follow themand find out what's happening.

She followed them out of the library, out of town, and into to a park.At this point, she hid behind a tree, not wanting to be seen.

She saw the two chickens throwing the books at a frog in a pond, towhich the frog was kept repeating, "Rrredit Rrredit Rrredit..."

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+In a hurry to make an appointment on time, a businessman parked hiscar in a no parking zone, and left the following note under thewindshield wiper:

"I've circled the block for 15 minutes without finding a parkingspot. If I don't park here, I'll lose my job. Remember the bible,'Forgive us our trespasses.'"

Returning later to his car, he found parking ticket and this noteunder the windshield wiper:

"I've been circling this block for 15 years. If I don't give you aticket, I'll lose my job. Remember the bible, 'Lead us not intotemptation.'"

~~#~~#~~#~~#~~~#~~~#There is the story of a person who got up one Sunday andannounced to his congregation:I have good news and bad news.The good news is, we have enough money to pay for ournew building program.The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets.

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas justbefore a long holiday weekend.The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead ofhim in front of the service station. Finally, the attendant motionedhim toward a vacant pump."Reverend," said the young man, sorry about the delay.It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get readyfor a long trip.The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the samein my business."