Even after whatever the fuck last season was, I stuck around for the first episode of the sixth season of Game of Thrones.

I was even planning on keeping HBO even if I stopped watching Game of Thrones completely. After all, John Oliver.

After seeing the Dornish story line in the first episode, I’ve decided I can not give HBO another cent of my money.

I have no illusion that my cancellation means a damn thing. I’m not that self-important. The customer service rep at Direct TV joked with me when I canceled that I must not watch Game of Thrones. She was a bit taken aback upon finding out that I am a huge ASOIAF nerd and Game of Thrones was the only reason I had HBO in the first place. I am just one against the flood of people coming back to HBO with the start of the new season. I gave her the 30 second run down on why I was done with the show, which got the amusing reply of “well I guess a five dollar discount isn’t going to keep you then, is it.”

Come on people, they pissed in your glass and you keep praising the vintage. The AV Club gave that train wreck a B fucking plus.

I would pay so much for five off the record minutes with George R. R. Martin, a writer who is notoriously hostile to fan fiction, to hear his uncensored thoughts on what D&D have done to his characters.

*deep breath*

That’s it. Not turning this into a 1000 word rant. I’ve said what I logged on to say.

And we’re running through and we come to a river and Sansa is just too scared basically to get into the river. So I get in. Don’t believe the press shots! It looks like she’s trying to get me out of the river, when I’m actually trying to be the strong one and get her in the river.

*reads the interview calmly* *re-reads the above line* *face palms* *slams head off desk several times* *longs for the halcyon days of season three when I thought Game of Thrones was the best possible adaptation A Song of Ice and Fire could ever get.* *cancels HBO*

If there are any English majors around, may I ask a question? While I am aware that nothing (excepting an example of visual irony I believe) in Alanis Morissette’s hit song “Ironic” is actual ironic, how’s this for an example?

George R. R. Martin, an author who is an outspoken critic of fan fiction, signs off on a adaptation of his masterpiece, the epic series A Song of Ice and Fire, to be adapted for the small screen by David Benioff and D.B. Weiss for HBO, only to see it change from a fairly faithful adaptation to pure, “chaos is a ladder” fan fiction that ignores more of his themes and characterizations than it acknowledges?

Is that ironic?

*sigh* And yet I am sure it will set viewing records for HBO this season as well.

(And just to cut off an argument I get much too often, no, they are not going their own way apart from the books because they ran out of material. They spent 2 seasons (3 and 4) adapting the third book in the series, A Storm of Swords. Then, instead of adapting the next two huge novels in the series, they instead changed every single plot line significantly for no reason other than they wanted to. I wonder what the reaction would have been if halfway through the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Peter Jackson killed off Legolas, had Gimli start molesting hobbits, made Aragorn rape Éowyn, and changed the ending to have Frodo kill Smeagol after Gollum kills Sam, and then throw the ring into Mount Doom himself in order to make him look more heroic to the viewers?)

About the Author

Described as "intelligent but self-destructive," Foster Disbelief spent his twenties furiously attempting to waste his potential in a haze of religion and heroin. Science and atheism allowed him to escape his twin addictions and he now spends his days attempting to make the most of his three remaining brain cells.