The Cats – Gypsy, Gracie, Pippin, Ms Pretty, Boogie, Trevor and River. Take notes, there’ll be a quiz on this later.

The Gigolo – Our neighbor who’s not really a gigolo, but he drives a Corvette, wears lots of gold chains and (my eyes!) never wears a shirt in the summer.

The Almost Creepy but Not Quite Creepy Neighbor – Another neighbor who lives two houses down, but the yards are really tiny, so it’s almost like he’s right next door. He is incapable of reading social cues, like the fact that I’m wearing sunglasses, reading a book, have my back to him, with music playing means that I’m not interested in conversing with him. Especially while I’m in a bikini.

I come from a huge family, as the youngest of six, so I’m sure my kinfolk will be mentioned at some point, I’m sure, but I’m not quite sure how they’d feel about being mentioned by names, so I’ll try to keep them somewhat anonymous.