This Is Not a Drill: Hot Pockets Yanked From Shelves for Containing ‘Diseased and Unsound Animals’

We don't know what an unsound animal is, but we're pretty sure we don't want to eat one

If you were planning to eat a Hot Pocket today, you might want to reconsider that decision. Several varieties have been recalled after it came to light that some of the products’ meat had not undergone proper inspection, CBS Baltimore reports.

More specifically (and more vomit-inducingly), some of the meat — if affiliated with the California-based Rancho Feeding Corporation — could have come from “diseased and unsound animals,” according to a news release from the USDA. The Giant supermarket chain has pulled the Philly Steak & Cheese and Croissant Crust Philly Steak & Cheese varieties, according to CBS Baltimore.

Oh man. Let’s hope Jim Gaffigan hears about this and works it into his next comedy special: