Friday, November 1, 2013

Jolly Rancher

The day after Halloween. Parents, has your kid's sugar rush ended yet? Singles, did you have a good time dressing up to go out?Marrieds, no kids - did you come home to an empty bowl on your front porch that was once loaded with candy and a sign that said "Please take ONE" (yeah, right)?

Halloween is kind of a weird holiday once you age beyond the "Trick or Treat" phase. 'Course, that expiration age seems to have gotten quite a bit older in recent years. One of the zombies that came to our door this year had a very realistic cut on his face...presumably from his razor. Let's just be brutally honest here, when you reach a certain age it's time to stop dressing up on Halloween** and going door to door to beg for candy.

On the candy subject, make sure you are giving out sweets that are NOT CRAP. Anything chocolate is good: Snickers, Milky Way, 3 Musketeers, Butterfinger, Heath bars, hell even Almond Joy or Mounds. People that say they don't like coconut are lying, they don't dislike the taste, just the consistency (NSFW). Twizzlers, Laffy Taffy, and various suckers are all OK.Peppermints, while good after a meal, suck as Halloween candy.Individually-wrapped Life Savers is just a cheap way to give out a lot. Quality > Quantity.Candy Corn is awful.Dubble Bubble you can get away with. It might be cheap, but at least it's gum.Or you can always go with a time-tested standby. The Jolly Rancher.

Now that you're too old to dress up**, let's look at the booze version of same.JOLLY RANCHER

1.5 oz Melon Liqueur.5 oz Blueberry Schnapps

2 oz Sweet & SourSplash Grenadine

Shake melon liqueur and blueberry schnapps over ice

Strain in to a rocks glass 1/2 filled with ice

Top with sweet & sour

Add a splash of grenadine

Stir

**OK, so I'm a hypocrite. And before you ask, yes, it was cold outside in that tank top...