About this blog...

Here you will find information, musings, and pictures about life, the natural world and writing.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Judging the American Cuddle Dog: Clarifications

Dear Readers of This Blog: The following came to my attention recently and should be of interest to many of you. A. Littlewood

Dear ACD Judges,

The ACD board is hearing way too many complaints about
judging at the American Cuddle Dog trials. If we are ever to get the same respect as the agility and herding
events, we absolutely have to have consistency in our judging. I know you all
do your best to be fair and impartial, but it’s time we upped our game.

The American Cuddle Dog is judged on performance. [This cannot be repeated too often.] Here are the
standards with my comments (the ACD board’s
comments) in brackets. Read them carefully
and follow them to the letter!

1. The show ring is prepared with one sofa per contestant. Dogs
enter with their handlers and stand by their assigned sofa. Handlers sit down
and wait for the judge’s command “Lap your dog”. [This part is working fine—no
problems.]

2. The Cuddle Dog is to wait quietly for the handler’s signal.
Eagerness is desirable, but jumping before the command, pawing the sofa, and
loud whining are penalized. When the handler signals by voice or hand, the ACD
should immediately jump up. [If the ACD needs handler help to get on the sofa,
this is permitted, but the handler can’t just haul the ACD up there—the dog has
to be trying. Most of you judges understand
this.]

On the lap, the Cuddle Dog is judged as follows:

3. The dog’s speed
in assuming the “boneless” posture is crucial. The Cuddle Dog may be on its
belly or its back—relaxation is the primary criterion. Circling and pawing to
improve the lap are penalized.
[Judges, this is a performance
competition. One of you recently disqualified a St. Bernard on grounds “he was
just too damn big” and another disqualified a greyhound (“all bones and
joints”). This is not a conformation class! Any dog can enter!]

4. The
Cuddle Dog is judged by its degree of immobility, although gentle nudging of
the handler to elicit stroking is permitted.

5. Thermal transfer is
evaluated by thermometer inserted at the handler’s thigh. Thermally neutral
dogs are disqualified. Warmth is essential to Cuddle Dog performance. [Judges,
wait four minutes before the thermometer test.]

6. Flatulence
(by the ACD) is cause for immediate disqualification. [Handlers often try to
hide this defect. Watch closely for grimacing, blowing, or breathing to the
side.]

7. The Cuddle Dog’s coat should be tactically pleasing. [Judges
are allowed leeway in this necessarily subjective evaluation, but do not abuse
this. An older Golden Retriever, otherwise very well qualified, was rejected
for “shedding like Aunt Maggie’s raccoon jacket.” The ACD board will consider
whether to declare excessive shedding as a defect, but it is not one now so don’t use it!]

8. Steadiness in the face of distractions is tested by waving
ordinary dog kibble 12” from the dog’s nose. The Cuddle Dog should respond by
no more than one briefly opened eye. [Judges, You may not use dried liver bits, venison jerky, or decaying chicken
bones for this test. There is only so much you can expect of any dog, even a
Champion ACD.]

I’m sure we can avoid future brouhahas by consistent
judging. Owners of ACD’s are by nature sedentary, peaceful people. As long as
they think their dogs are being evaluated fairly, we should see no more
acrimonious charges that “only King Charles Spaniels and miniature poodles have
a chance,” and so on.