Yesterday was my birthday, and I was so exited my boyfriend was coming. I was happy, so I got all dressed up just to see him. But we were fighting all day yesterday! He was calling me names all day and hanging up on me all day. Last night he told me if we break up hes gonna come to my house and tell my mom the truth, the fact that I slept with someone else,THE BIGGEST MISTAKE, I DONíT KNOW WHAT TO DO I donít want my mom to know what I did. He also says that hes very sorry for being this way with me, but its my fault hes like that with me. I know it is, but im always in pain now. And I donít want to let him go cuz I truly love him. Yesterday he told me hes gonna pick up all his things and I just told him go ahead, I will move on. I hung up on him about 4 times, but he called back trying to say that he doesnít want it to be over. But I just feel I cant take this pain anymore. But if we break up heíll tell my parents what I did. What would you do if you were me. Oh yeah, what a happy birthday I had huh! I mean i would at least want some love on my birthday from him, but he just treats me sooo bad... but we love eachother. dO I REALLY DESERVE THIS MUCH? i understand i made a big mistake and im paying for it! but do i really deserve THIS MUCH PAIN?
Posted by Heather (Member # 3) on 04-23-200403:09 PM:

Come ON, honey.

People who love and care for you? Don't blackmail you, verbally abuse you, and blame it on YOU -- on your birthday no less -- for crying out loud. He sure IS sorry.

This reads like a bad country/western song, and lemme tell you, I've been listening to them all day, so the uncanny resemblance is quite striking.

No one deserves this kind of crap: but hey, if you stick around and put up with it? That's nobody's doing but YOURS.

Giove yourself a good birthday present: how about a little self-respect?

If he tells your parents, you'll deal with it, and whatever happens with that will likely pass in short order, though it sure sounds like a hollow threat to me, and he's the one who's going to look the worst if he does, not you.

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson

Posted by Heather (Member # 3) on 04-23-200403:10 PM:

(And hey: happy birthday. Here's to starting the year with a smart decision so it's the best one ever.)
Posted by SweetTemptation69 (Member # 17139) on 04-23-200403:23 PM:

THANKYOU for being a friend. THATS WHAT I NEEDED. i just wasnt sure if i deserved this treatment after what i did or not. I was just confused becasue he tells me i deserve it after what i did to him. I guess i deserved some pain, but everything he calls me like a b_____ and a h__... i cant take it. It really hurts especially on my day, im being put down by the guy i really love.but thank you, i dont have anyone else to go to but this website.
Posted by Heather (Member # 3) on 04-23-200403:38 PM:

You're welcome. Now get out of that relationship. Don't wait, and don't backpedal. Do it for yourself: after all, if you're unwilling to care for yourself, you're not geing to be able to reconize when someone else isn't doing it, either.

And next time? Love someone who loves you back, sugar -- that means TREATING you lovingly -- and who is worthy of what you're giving and feeling.

(Heck -- even when you end this, it'd be worth looking at what exactly you loved here in the first place, or if you were mistaking feelings of dependence or need for love.)

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.