Jess crashes a funeral, where she hopes to delete a sexy text message she had sent the deceased. Meanwhile, Schmidt's mom visits and demands he write bar-mitzvah thank-you notes; and Winston tries to become off-duty friends with his police partner.

Jess accompanies Fawn to a charity golf tournament, where the vice principal's attempts to make a good impression prove subpar. Meanwhile, Winston meets an attractive woman but needs to lie about being a cop.