Story Part 14

Usually that’s where the memory ends; the next memory is him getting a clean bill from the institute. After that his anger issues were better (not good but enough to keep him out of jail) and the gaps in memory are nowhere near as large. His life built from there to the mediocre life he had up until those two men came into his place. He realized he didn’t even know for sure when that was, he has no idea how long they kept him unconscious or how far they had traveled. He also realized he wasn’t waking up at the end of the memory or switching to the one of him getting out. He was actually…remembering more. This was new, yes it was a memory so technically old but it was one he was just remembering for the first time since it happened. “You don’t want me to get angry, but you want me to talk about anger. How can I talk about anger without remembering the things that made me angry and getting angry in turn…” that was clearly his voice but he had no memory of the words.

“Hmmm, so you cannot look at the anger without experiencing it yet… Well you are a bit young yet maybe that ability will come with age” though the doctors tone clearly indicated his lack of faith in that possibility. “Okay, get angry if you must, but should your anger make you decide to resist the treatment then you shall be sedated again understand?” He started to nod, or try to, but then remembered his head was quite firmly in place. “Okay the anger, it’s like, empowering. I fell stronger, faster, more sure of myself. The main downside is that I also feel like I cannot control it. It is completely based on whim, and considering it is still anger it tends to be rather pointed and destructive. Hence how I ended up in here. I have tried….FUCK WHAT WAS THAT FOR!” last little be coinciding with a shock.

“I don’t need to know, nor do I care how you have tried to self-treat your anger issues. Since you do not know the source I am fairly certain none of them came to much fruition. Just saving both of us the time of your explanation” The doctor leaned in close, definitely a smile on his face. It didn’t touch his eyes though; his eyes were cold as was the humor in it. He suddenly realized that if the doctor were to vivisect him he would probably have the same look on his face and in those eyes. He was so close if only he could reach this man…then give him a taste of the pain he had inflicted….wait…. his right arm…the restraint on it felt a little loose during the last shock….maybe he might be able to. Lashing and turning throwing everything he had into the effort he felt the restraint give grabbing the doctor. The doctor felt…almost oily he had him but it was like he was somehow…slipping out of the grip. He could hear the doors open as something dropped against his other hand….it was the control for the electric shocks! Not sure how he figured out such an action so quickly he pushed the doctor’s head against the metal arm of the chair he was in and grabbed and hit the button. The electricity raced through his body and, he could tell by seeing the reaction in the man’s face, into the doctor’s head then to ground through the chair.

Only lasted for a few moments until he lost grip of both the control and the doctor, but the doctor was still screaming like he was being shocked. In fact…before he lost consciousness it almost looked as if smoke was coming off of the man in increasing amounts. Guess that explains why there were no memories of that doctor in his discharge hearing. Troubling thing is that, if that memory was real, he never should have been discharged in the first place. He seriously harmed that doctor, and only felt satisfaction at the doctor’s screams. What kind of monster was he? Not that he felt bad, quite obviously that doctor was a monstrous person himself, but still the fact that it brought him joy bothered him deeply.