30.05.2017.

May 2017

You were full and fully capable
You were self sufficient and needless
Your house was fully decorated in that sense
You were taken with me to a point
A case of careful what you wish for
But what you knew was enough to begin
And so you called and courted fiercely
So you reached out, entirely fearless
And yet you knew of reservation and how it serves
And I salute you for your courage
And I applaud your perseverance
And I embrace you for your faith in the face of adversarial forces
That I represent
So you were in but not entirely
You were up for this but not totally
You knew how arms length-ing can maintain doubt
And so you fell and you're intact
So you dove in and you're still breathing
So you jumped and you're still flying if not shocked
And I support you in your trusting
And I commend you for your wisdom
And I'm amazed by your surrender in the face of threatening forces
That I represent
You found creative ways to distance
You hid away from much through humor
Your choice of armor was your intellect
And so you felt and you're still here
And so you died and you're still standing
And so you softened and you're still safely in command
Self protection was in times of true danger
Your best defense to mistrust and be wary
Surrendering a feat of unequaled measure
And I'm thrilled to let you in
Overjoyed to be let in in kind
Written by Alanis Morissette

30.05.2017.

Deep Inside You

Deep inside you
I may have left a trace of light
in the night between the walls
even all the good people
and all of those that you know
and the getaway from loneliness
in which you hide
when desperation brakes out
are barely enough
in front of the cruel power
final and ultimate
deep inside you
passions are braking
what remained
and what doesn’t exist
longing for death
desire for survival
craving for freedom
and will to bow to destiny
like on a palm
deep inside you
thousands of drummers
fanfares from distance
half-mast flags
who are you crying for my love
black omens on your darling’s face
downcast in words
for once in a lifetime
I will let a man of cold grasp and steel look
capture me

07.05.2017.

May 7 2017

Last year on this day I have moved from my birth city Sarajevo to Arizona. Time flies when you are having fun, or it just flies faster with aging.
However, since last year May 7 I have shared so many exciting places mostly with one of my best friends, someone without whose support nothing would be the same, my partner in crime Mat Dry. Certainly one of a kind creature and a person that has a heart size of the galaxy, someone who is so easy to love with a full heart.
<3
I have squeezed in this year trips to California, Huntington Beach, Disneyland, Utah and Bryce & Zion Canyons, exploring food of the rustic small town Panguitch, experiencing force of the space at Meteor Crater, three times visiting one of the worlds wonders Grand Canyon and sharing it with my dear brother and my amazing redhair hero Sandra Sladakovic.
Hiking to the weirdest forest of Arizona- Petrified Forest, have been trying Caribbean food at Albuquerque, looked for aliens at Roswell, New Mexico. Hiking inside of the amazing Carlsbad Caverns, and having a first row tickets for the millions bat sunset dance at the entrance of the caverns. Checking out what has inspired creators of the Martian movie at the Biosphere 2 in southern part of Arizona. Rafting almighty Colorado and sharing a life changing experience with a 2016-17 Humphrey Fellows, exploring history of Arizona at Prescott, finding the oldest restaurant in AZ. I got to hang out with a local animals in Florida, alligators' are just about everywhere, especially in amazing Everglades. Comparing western and eastern coasts of Florida, merging to the art lifestyle of Miami. Being hosted and embraced by Mat's BF Rola and his gorgeous wife Galit Freedman.Getting finally to meet one of the best writers that live in the New York City, Jessamyn Hope, and seeing Big Apple from authentic perspective of the locals. Doing National Monuments marathon with Fellows, conquering Canyon De Chelly, Monument Valley and Grand Canyon in only 48 hours.
And testifying to the magnificent flexibility of the human body by being exposed to the colors, music and dance moves of the Cirque du Soleil in Las Vegas...
A lot to put in one year? I would still say that a way more is in front of me and us. I am grateful that I also got to became a part of the ASU, and got to experience perspective on HHH program from the other angle, working and making things become real together with Claire and Dr. Bill.
And certainly I am so grateful to have amazing friends Brian, Christy, Seidi, Jennifer, Jen, Hayden, Dan, Sam, Anne, Ashley, Lily, Casidy and many others here too that have embraced me with completely open hearts and arms.
And I found also a second family- Dry family made me feel as an important part of it. And it is such a huge privilege.
I do miss my mom a lot. I miss to have a morning coffee with her,I miss to see her laughing and being happy, I miss my cousin and her gorgeous daughters. I miss seeing them growing up and discovering world. And I miss a lot my Bosnian friends, from that perspective year seems as a too long time not to see them. Tnx to the Social Media I am everyday involved in their lives, celebrating their happiness and being frustrated with their life obstacles.
I just yesterday missed weeding of one of my bets friends Tomislava and she certainly have found an amazing guy who understands how unique and special create she is, and just seeing them shine even thought the Viber or FB makes my heart bigger.
I miss having our famous “kafa utorkom” in Izlog or to go to the theater shows and enjoy magic crated by of one the best actors and very special friend my dear Mario.
But I guess it is impossible to have it all and to be everywhere at the same time. I know that future holds a lots of travels shared with my Bosnian and USA fiends. My USA friends certainly need to explore and discover beauty of Sarajevo and Balkans, and my Bosnian friends should come here and let me be their guide now that I have discovered soo many places to visit and explore.
Love you all and thank you all for being a very part in my life journey!