Why Leaving is Hard

If you’re not experiencing abuse, it can be hard to know why it is hard to leave an abusive relationship.

Because domestic violence affects every aspect of a person’s life, deciding to end a relationship and escape abuse can be more difficult than one would think. In any abusive relationship, anxiety and exhaustion deplete a victim’s energy to resist, and victims often begin to believe that they deserve the poor treatment they receive from loved ones.

Aside from fearing repercussions that could put their health and safety at risk, victims may struggle to leave their partners because of the following factors.

Fear of

What will happen

How their partner or loved one will react

What friends or family will think

Being alone or parenting alone

Being blamed for the abuse

Being incomplete or incapable without this person

Being outed as LGBTQ

Bringing shame to the community due to cultural or religious tradition

The possibility that this person will commit suicide

Jeopardizing immigration status

Feelings of

Pity for this person

Love for this person, who can be charming in calm periods

Obligation to uphold vows

Guilt for the abuse

Denial about the abuse

Physical, emotional, or financial dependence

Helplessness due to limited:

English-speaking ability

Money and resources

Access to shelter

Physical or mental capacity

Self-esteem

Outside forces also play a role in a victim’s inability to escape abuse. Instead of being seen as a public health issue, domestic violence is often considered a private affair within couples. Society tells victims that they must focus on saving the relationships rather than escaping the violence. For this reason, HAWC has partnered with local courthouses, hospitals, police departments, and religious organizations to ensure that victims of abuse receive extensive support.

Leaving an abusive relationship means gradually recognizing that you are in control of your life, no matter what. The first step in this process is acknowledging a need for help. Whether you want to discuss this issue and make a plan, or you seek an immediate emergency shelter, HAWC is ready to help. Call our hotline at 800-547-1649 today.