Then I worked in the woods as a Lumberjack, But just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe
After that, I tried being a Tailor, But wasn't suited for it
Next, I tried working in a Muffler Factory, but that was too exhausting
Then, tried being a Chef - figured it would add a little spice to my life, but just didn't have the thyme
Next, I attempted being a Deli Worker, But any way I sliced it, Couldn't cut the mustard
My best job was a Musician, But eventually found I wasn't noteworthy
Next, was a job in a Shoe Factory? Tried hard but just didn't fit in
Managed to get a good job working for a Pool Maintenance Company, But the work was just too draining
So then I got a job in a Workout Centre, But they said I wasn't fit for the job
After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a Historian - until I realized there was no future in it
SO, I TRIED RETIREMENT AND I FOUND I'M PERFECT FOR THE JOB!