What Not To Say To The Big-Busted Ladies In Your Life

I’ve got a rack on me. I know this. I not only know this because I have a mirror, but because I haven’t been able to comfortably sleep on my stomach since 1989. I’ve been rocking these things for awhile now, and they’ve been a D cup for far too long.

As I’ve written before, I have a serious love/hate relationship with my boobs. Some days I think they’re so great! They look amazing in the right bra, I can properly fill out a dress, and they provide a pillow on which to rest my hand when I’m staring at the TV. I don’t know why, but my hand always falls there.

But then there are days, like today, where they piss me off. I shouldn’t have to wear a bra while I’m inside in my underwear working, but I know that if I don’t, my back will ache tomorrow. It’s not fun. Bad big boobs.

Huffington Post did a piece today on what not to say to small-busted women. As usual, I was annoyed that this article didn’t relate to me in someway. Did the world not get the memo that I need everything to relate to me, or I get confused? Or maybe I have yet to send that memo; I’ll double check with my imaginary assistant Rebecca to see.

However, what is most important is that we cover what not to say to the big-busted ladies in our life. Just because we have huge knockers doesn’t mean that we don’t require some level of sympathy. It’s hard having big boobs sometimes. It really is! I really don’t want to have to wear this fucking bra anymore today! Someone coddle us large-chested women of the world and hand over the painkillers and wine!

As a small-busted girl, that article on the Huffington Post was kind of stupid. A couple of those would be offensive if actually phrased that way, but I’ve never met anyone who actually would. Because I do not hang around with catty bitches who offer backhanded compliments about my boob size.

D is dainty. Probably the worst thing you can say to a large-bosomed person is, “Wow, you must have, like, double-Ds!”

Behold the vicious cycle:

1) Nobody knows how diverse bra sizes should be.

2) Bra manufacturers make a tiny range of sizes because it’s cheaper and there’s no demand for anything else.

3) Anyone with a narrow waist or non-small boobs squashes themselves into tiny cups and/or suffers a bra band so loose it rides up.

4) Everyone assumes they’re AA-DD, with a band size no lower than 32.

5) Repeat.

I was part of the cycle for years. I wore a band six inches looser than the measurement around my ribs (UNDER the boobs; people; ignore Victoria’s Secret’s online size guide). That was the only way I could find a D cup large enough to contain most of my tit (bra fact: a 38D uses much more fabric in the cup than a 28D. It’s all proportional).

So, yeah, one of the worst things we can do for busty women is perpetuate the idea that B/C is average and anything above DD is fake. It’s time to use the rest of the alphabet.

Amanda Chatel

Woe… then my D cup might be off, because my boobs are twice that… or more. Easily. OMG. I may have been walking around with the double boob all this time and never knew.

MeghanM

I was wearing D forever… Then got measured and I’m a G. Nordstrom. Excellent selection. Worth the $.

Breezy

Yes, sames. It can be super awkward to have a stranger with a tape measure positioning you in the proper fit, but its absolutely worth it. Having the right fit makes me way less resentful of my huge tits.

Hermet

not the same weight as when you were 18? Don’t worry about it. None of us are.

Kristina Scala

Victoria’s Secret’s crazy size ladies kept telling me I was a 42DDD. NOPE. Went to an actual bra-fitting appointment and, lo and behold, 38G/GG. Those fucking horrendous gouges in my shoulders from the bra straps are going away! And my boobs aren’t squished up together in a desperation huddle for support! AND NO MORE DOUBLE BOOB.

Any big-boobed ladies in NYC who need a bra fitting and want to see what happy, happy boobs and back feel like, I highly suggest Linda’s. (I think the site is lindasonline.com, and you can make an appointment there.) Their bras are around the same price as Victoria’s Secret bras and like a million times more well-crafted and beautiful.

http://twitter.com/Tobi_Is_Fab Nerdy Lucy

Me too. I wear 38D and I am way bigger than that. Also, a lot of bra articles lately have been making me think I am wearing a band size too big for me. =

http://twitter.com/Tobi_Is_Fab Nerdy Lucy

Or maybe I should say that I THINK I wear a 38D. Probably not.

skjdfksdjfs

Head on over to reddit.com/r/abrathatfits and bustyresources.wikia.com to get guidance on how to find your right bra size. You’re not alone in being in the wrong size bra, and 80-95% of the bra-wearing population is, indeed, in the wrong size. From your picture, there is no way on Earth your band is a 38. I have a friend that weighs much more than you and she’s only in a 34 band.

Tusconian

Two explanations:

1- You’re wearing the wrong size. There is a stigma, at least in the US, against sizes over D, which is considered an outlier in and of itself (despite the fact that according the the most recent surveys I’ve seen, D is average). Even employees at many bra shops refuse to believe it, and are using a system of measurement about 80 years out of date. Can’t believe a “large-chested” woman has suggested VS, because not only do they have a tiny range of sizes, I have met a grand total of ONE VS employee who did not tell me I was not only an A cup, but had such a small rib cage that I couldn’t find the bra I was looking for (in practice, I wear a 32DD in their brand, which they did recently start carrying). When I was a teen and still growing, my mother refused to buy me C cup bras because she didn’t FEEL LIKE my bras could be too small or the wrong size, and there’s no way a girl “my size” could possibly be more than a 32B. And the majority of bra-fitters and size charts online are absolute garbage.

2- You’re actually a D cup, but simply a different size than the picture posted. A 40D and a 32D are drastically different sizes, but people also shy away from acknowledging band sizes aside from 34 and 36 exist. If you wear a 32 or lower, you’re “OMG so skinny, must be anorexic” and if you’re a 38 or higher you’re “OMG so fat,” when in reality there as quite a few band sizes that are “average,” and it doesn’t have that much to do with how fat or thin you are. A woman with a 40D cup and an otherwise small frame might appear to have huge boobs compared to a girl with a thicker frame but a small ribcage wearing a 32DDD.

mwakholi

Truth. When a bra brand claims to be for bigger boobs, and boast it goes ‘all the way up to an E’ cup, sometimes I laugh until I cry.

And if you have any questions, you can post read or here: reddit.com/r/abrathatfits

And also: bratabase.com

“A C cup” means nothing in the world of bras. A 36C holds a large volume than a 28C, and a 42A is much bigger than a 32C. A C simply means the person’s ribcage is 3 inches smaller than their bust. And, as an example, all of these girl are D/DD cups, and they ain’t large: http://t.co/CntyrwHf

I’ve never been to anywhere but the shoe section in a Nordstrom, so this is good to know. (Although I’m totally hitting up La Perla here in Paris before I head home… you know, as a souvenir.)

Laura

H cup here. I wish I could buy bras at stores like Victoria’s Secret.

insanelady

Some people seem to think that asking if they are real is some form of compliment. It really really isn’t. Also it lets me know that they’ve been staring closely at my tits, which makes me rather uncomfortable.

Hermet

If it makes you uncomfortable, then do something with them other than increasing the size, shape and curves. It is very easy to wear something with a neckline at the neck, not the middle of the abdomen, and not so tight you can see every bumpy pore in the skin.

CMJ

If you want to spend a little more money, Agent Provocateur makes bras up to 36E.

Amanda

They should have added more to the Huffington Post article. I do not have the body of a 12 year old boy. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard, “real women have curves” or “meat is for the man, only dogs like bones” I would be stinkin’ rich.

Hersmet

But who really wants the big floppy things dangling and swaying? I can’t believe they’d be very comfy. Plus, soft tissue s t r e t c h e s over the years, accentuating the downward pull of gravity.

Cheryl

Sounds like it’s much easier to buy bras in large sizes here in England. The website I shop on goes up to size L. Though thankfully I’m not as big as that! I do agree that the lady who wrote the article must be wearing the wrong size!

Elizabeth, Ontario

Your cup size only makes sense when you know which band size you have. A 30D woman’s boobs are FOUR cup sizes smaller than a woman with 38D boobs. This article and company changed my bra life! http://blog.butterflycollection.ca/2012/05/bra-school-not-all-d-cups-are-same-size.html I was wearing a giant 40DD Playtex bra and it turned out I needed a 32GG (virtually the same cup volume but a much shorter band). The smaller band got rid of my headaches and made my breasts look smaller because they didn’t hang so low down my body.