What To Tell Your Angry Aunt When She Asks Why You Don’t Want Kids

Thanksgiving is a couple of months away, which means you’ll soon be having all of your favorite annual conversations with all of your favorite distant relatives. Exciting! Surely, you can’t wait to speak in length about all the stuff you’ve avoided addressing since last November. How is work? Did you get that promotion? Are you dating? Marriage? Kids?! Let’s stop right there. If you, like oh so many other millennials living in the U.S. today, are not as thrilled with the idea of having kids as was the preceding generation, here are just a few quick responses you can give to your aunt this holiday season after having thrown back a few stiff glasses of punch.

1. Kids Are VERY Expensive:

According to the Wall Street Journal, the average cost of raising a child from birth to 18 is over 245,000 dollars! Do you have that money? Are you that secure that you know you will have enough income and resources to buy three meals a day, not just for you, but for your helpless baby for the next two decades? Not to mention school, clothes, and insurance. Add to that the fact that it’s more culturally acceptable than ever in the States for kids to stay at home long past 18. Sometimes they stick around deep into their 20s.

2. Kids are VERY Bad For The Environment:

The carbon footprint of a single human is gargantuan. Humans, by merely existing, are producing an alarming amount of carbon. On top of that, humans buy a lot of stuff. In fact, they inherently have to buy stuff, because buying stuff is what keeps economies flowing. The only problem is that a lot of the stuff we buy produces more greenhouse gases. You could buy yourself a fleet of Hummers and go on gas guzzling joy rides for the rest of your life, and you would be doing less damage to the environment than if you were to have a kid.

3. We Already Have A VERY Large Number Of People In The World:

Resources are diminishing before our eyes. Vital resources. Like water. Just because the US isn’t as overpopulated as India or China doesn’t mean that you should add to the problem. More people are being born than dying and at a certain point, we are going to reach the limits of what this earth can provide for us.

4. Kids Will Rob You Of Your Independence:

You can promptly forget about whatever dreams you may have once had of seeing the world and exploring exciting foreign cultures. You’re also pretty much contractually bound to your partner, at least until the kid is old enough to take care of him/herself. Unless of course you want to be an absent parent, which brings forth a whole other slew of implications.

So the next time your angry aunt wants to call you out on not having kids, start off by simply saying you’ve made a decision and you’re comfortable with that decision. But if she wants to push the subject and refuses to let it go, now you know what to say. Ready to get that vasectomy? Say no more. Call Dr. Harry Fisch at 212-879-0800 for the best vasectomy doctor NYC services.