About me

I want to live!Maria was talking gently, with a nice moldavian accent from Barlad.Always with God on her lips and Virgin Mary in her heart. She is talking with hope for something better and with the regret that she has for over 15 years, of not being able to help her children better. It was 3 years old Oana and 7 her brother, when the tiny woman remained their only parent. "Misunderstandings" she calls the reason of her break-up and she adds quietly, to be forgiven of any possible sin: "It is on God's judgement everything is done, i don't have to presume that much".She keeps quiet. She remembers the achivements of her children and she starts talking about their grades over 9,20, about the desire Oana had to study medicine (had* because she is now studying foreign languages), about the right, but heavy road that her sun took: the monasticism. "It's difficult without him, he was another pair of helping hands, but it is a big sin to try to move somebody away of this road. He wanted that very much. He started to go to the monastery he lives in now, when he was 15. He lives there for 4 years now. I only told him to think well because the road is hard and exhausting, even though beautiful if you take it for feeling so." the woman said. Now she mets him only when she goes to the monastery for confession and for Communion. She is happy to see him and also to know him closer to God. She returns home knowing that he is healthy, and sometimes he even gives her some sanctified oil from the candels of saints relics to anoint the scars she got from surgery 2 years ago. Then 12 lymph nodes, from which 8 in metastases, were removed from her right breast and armpit. " I had noticed some swelling. I made some analysis in Barlad, but the doctors told me that it should better go to Iasi. My daughter searched for a doctor and I saw the photo of one of them. So bright and kind seemed to me that I told myself that he must be my doctor and God took care of me as if the doctor said that his hands are holded by God's. After the surgery the doctors for her other problems and for how evolved was the cancer, gave her only a few months of life, but she still survives without chemoterapy or another treatment like that, by puting r life in the hands ofGod. She has to eat healthy, but she doesn't because the only money they have, 515 rons, aren't enough not even for her, but from those money she has to pay for her daughter food and accommodation. The fight is hard for the 57 years old woman in Barlad (Romania).