If you follow me on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram, you’ll see right away that I’m something of a Mad Men fan/aficionado/freak. So when MensFitness.com tapped me to do a piece for the Season 7 premiere, I started writing the story in my head even before I said yes.

The result of my obsessive episode-watching? “What Would Don Draper Say?” — a collection of Draper’s best comebacks that conveniently apply to every part of your life. Try ‘em in the mirror with a Don Draper growl.