Monday, 4 November 2013

Whispers of Spring....Chapter 10

Chapter
10

Raj reached across and caught the
first tear before it could trickle down. “Hey!
This is precious. Don’t shed it for me. I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

Naina
stared at him for a moment and then abruptly got up and walked toward the
window, looking out at the mountains bathed in silvery moonlight. She felt him
get up and slowly walk toward her and stand behind her. “Naina?”

She
shook her head and let out a deep sigh, “It’s not fair Raj. Why is it that what
happens in a parent’s life should negatively affect their child so much? It’s
just not fair.”

Raj
held her by the shoulders and turned her around, “Who says life is fair? We
just have to make the best of what it deals to us, and protect our children in
the best manner possible. Don’t worry about Tanu. Fortunately, she was too
young to understand what was happening. She is fine.”

“But
she lost her mother.”

“And
gained the love of three wonderful women. She is happy here Naina. It’s better
this way…for all concerned. Shilpa never wanted Tanu…She was pressurized into
having a baby by her family just as she was pressurized into marrying me. It was
a marriage of convenience. I thought we might make a success of it if we had a
child, but that was an illusion, as I know now. She lacks the maternal
instincts that I see so naturally in you. She just needed an excuse to get out
of the marriage and motherhood…and I gave her the perfect opportunity when I
was bedridden. Believe me, Tanu is richer in love today. Plus she has an older
brother too now.” He grinned.

Naina
groaned and closed her eyes, “Gosh, I hope you didn’t mind that. Adi has a
tendency to go overboard with perfection. I had no clue he was planning a
ritual.”

“C’mon
Naina. That was the most articulately endearing pipping ceremony I have ever
been part of.”

Naina
raised her brow, tilting her head to look at him, “Pipping ceremony? What’s
that?”

“It’s
a ceremony in army wherein when someone is promoted, the pips on his uniform
are changed as per the new rank. Adi has been promoted to the rank of big bro
now, and Tanu knotted his pips to his wrist.”

“Promotion…eh!!
Adi will be thrilled with that bit of information.” She walked toward the door,
“He is such a little Mr Perfect. So regimental. So unlike me….I sometimes
wonder how he got those traits?”

“Most
likely from his father,” Raj quipped without thinking and banged into Naina’s
back as she suddenly stopped. He felt her go still, as her hand on the door
knob froze. He gripped her arms to steady himself and sensed the tension. He
whispered to her back, “Naina, that was uncalled for. I am sorry.”

She
spoke in a low tone, “Never say that again…never. You hear me. Adi is nothing
like him…them.” Before he could react, she jerked the door open and walked
out…head bowed with aimless quick strides…toward the garden.

Raj
recoiled with horror at the naked agony reflecting in her eyes, “Naina, don’t
do this to yourself. Talk to me. I am your friend. Don’t avoid your past…Face
it. You need to deal with whatever happened.”

“Deal
with it? Face it?” She turned to him in rage…shaking, “You think I am avoiding
my past? Raj, I live my past every single day…I fight it every single minute.
You know nothing.….NO! Stay back…Don’t come closer.” She stared at him, her
hand raised…a deafening silence surrounding them. Raj hitched his breath and
didn’t say anything. She wrapped her arms around herself and whispered in a
tone that chilled him, “Do you know what it is to wait for the inevitable? I
do. I wait for it. It will catch me soon…and tag me…and take me.” She was
mumbling now, “I cannot outrun it. I…can’t…I….” She swayed like a tree in a
storm and clutched her stomach and then her neck. She made a choking sound and
looked at him with fear, “Raj……” He caught her before she hit the ground.

“NAINA!!”
He ran inside with her in his arms and kicked the library door open. Laying her
gently on the sofa, he first called the doctor and then beeji. Naina was
soaking wet with perspiration. By the time he came back from getting the water
jug from a side table, beeji and nanisa burst in. “What happened?”

“She
fainted.” He sprinkled a few water drops on her and sat down rubbing her hands,
“It’s all my fault. Oh God! I am a damn fool. Naina, honey, open your
eyes….please. I am so sorry.”

He
felt his grandmother’s hand on his shoulder and looked up with anguish,
“Nanisa!”

“Calm
down Raj. Let me get the doctor.”

“I
called him already.”

“Good.
Now tell us what happened.”

The
doctor entered as soon as he finished telling them. Raj repeated what happened
to Dr Chauhan, a man in his sixties, who was also their family doctor. He was
in his car and driving through the next lane when Raj called, so he could come promptly.
He listened to Raj attentively and then turned to beeji, “Has she had these
attacks earlier?”

Beeji
was quiet for a moment, and then she looked up, “Sort of…once…I had completely
forgotten about it.”

“When
beeji?” It was Raj. He was still crouched near Naina, holding her hand.

“The
night she met you and Tanu for the first time.”

The
doctor nodded and attended to Naina. Her vital signs had normalized. He gave
her an injection which he mentioned will calm her and make her feel drowsy and
help her to sleep. She stirred once and opened her eyes to look at everyone before
going off to sleep.

The
doctor motioned for everyone to move to the other corner of the library. He
looked grave and asked beeji, “Please explain to me exactly what happened when
she had the attack at your house.

“Well,
she came back home late and wasn’t hungry, so I took a glass of milk to her
room. I found her shaking and sweating holding a picture frame. She was
breathing rapidly and looked at me with eyes filled with fear and anxiety. I
took the picture from her hand and dragged her to the balcony. The cool breeze
calmed her, and she went to bed saying she was very tired and that she had to
get up early.”

“Whose
picture was she holding?”

“A
picture of her parents and sister. It’s the only one she has of them.”

“Where
are they?”

“They
died about eight years ago. She was eighteen then.”

“How
old was her sister?”

“Almost
as old as Tanu is now. Four, I think.”

“Does
she talk about them?”

“No.
Not much…just a mention here and there. But she does reply to Adi if he
questions about them.”

“Anything
else that might remind her of events of her past?” he asked beeji.

“Naina
has nightmares….if that counts”

The
doctor tapped his chin, “Hmm!! That explains it.”

Raj
was beside himself by now, “What are you saying Doc? Is it serious?”

The
old man looked at him gravely, “I hope not. Naina has had what we call panic
attacks. Sometimes memories that have been suppressed act as triggers for such
attacks. Obviously Tanu reminds her of her own sister. She may not have blocked
her past completely but she deliberately avoids talking about it. She avoids
the real memories and has numbed her emotions in a manner that does not hinder
her present living. On the two occasions she let her guard down and was forced
to recall in depth, she had these attacks.” He looked at beeji for
confirmation. She nodded.

The
doctor paused and then continued, “Sometimes changes like new people, sudden
appearances or mention of old names, and experiencing old emotions that refer
to the past break down the safety walls, directly triggering such attacks.” He
looked at Raj, “I have a feeling there’s more…something must have happened for
her to lash out at you like that…something she is keeping to herself. The way
she lost her cool today is not naturally Naina….which means she is harboring
some heavy burden that is gnawing at her. Her emotional distress manifested as
a physical one today.”

Beeji
was clearly worried when she said, “But my Naina is such a brave girl. She
never lets her past get in the way of our present. She is so vibrant and full
of life.”

“I
am sure she is leading a normal, happy life. She has to be a strong woman to
have endured so much and not have a breakdown. I am not even going to ask about
her married life. That seems to be the crux of her problems though.” He raised
his finger to stress his point and took a deep breath. He then looked at the
two ladies, “Look, I have only given you my opinion based on whatever I heard
about Naina. My experience says that Naina has not really dealt with whatever
emotional and physical trauma she has suffered, so she is most likely suffering
from a condition called posttraumatic stress disorder.” He got up to go and
looked at beeji, “Please call me tomorrow and I’ll give you the details of a
good psychiatrist I know. She resides in Shimla, but visits Palampur Medical
College twice a month. You can have a talk with her. My advice is: Do not
disregard this. Naina needs to talk to someone and get it all out. If she is
not taking her friends and family into confidence, then it has to be a
professional. For now, she will be fine. Let her sleep it out.”

************************************

“Here
nanisa, tea for you and coffee for beeji.” Raj handed the cups and sat down in
the opposite sofa in the family room. It was much after 10 pm. Naina was
sleeping in the guest room where Raj had settled her with beeji’s help. The
kids lay asleep in the other guest room where a maid kept an eye till she would
be relieved.

Raj
took a sip from his coffee and turned to beeji, “I have already delayed this. I
want to know all beeji…How is Naina related to you? What happened to her? She
clearly fears someone. Who?”

Beeji
kept her cup and held his gaze, “I promised Naina I will never say anything to
anyone. So, before I break my word to her, I have to know why is this so
important to you. Why can’t you let her be?”

Raj
looked at her and then at his grandmother who just raised her brow and waited.
He sighed, “Beeji, Naina has become a good friend. I value her welfare.”

“Is
that all Raj?”

“Of
course.”

“Is
there something you are not telling us?” Beeji looked at her friend and a tacit
communication passed between them.

“For
heaven’s sake beeji, you know me. I want to know because I want to help Naina.
Ever since I came here, she has done everything to settle us and helped us in
whatever manner she could. It’s only appropriate that I help her when she needs
it. I don’t like to see the fear I see in her eyes when she refers to her past.
It was worse that day in Kangra.”

Beeji’s
eyes widened, “What happened in Kangra?”

Raj
narrated about the reporter incident and beeji gasped, even as Ranima
straightened. She spoke first, “Again Raj…What was the name with which he
called her?”

“A
Mrs something Dhariwal.” He looked at beeji and understanding dawned, “He was
right. Wasn’t he? She was recognized. That’s why she was so scared. And that’s
what’s eating her up. I suspected as much.” He looked at both of them, “She is
not a Bhatia, is she?” They shook their heads.

He
raked his fingers through his hair, “Well…say something beeji.”

Beeji
looked at Ranima who reached across and patted her hand and nodded, “Tel him
Karuna. Raj might be able to help where we could not. I’ll leave you both now.
I have had a long day.” Ranima wished them goodnight and left.

Beeji
watched her close the door and then proceeded to speak, “Naina is not related
to me at all Raj. In fact I met her for the first time about seven years back in
Balrampur in Uttar Pradesh where I had gone to attend the marriage of my
sister-in-law’s son.” Raj remembered nanisa telling him once about beeji. She
had had a love marriage. She had married her best friend’s brother. Unfortunately,
she became a widow only a year after her marriage. Her in-laws had never
accepted her.

Beeji
settled back in the sofa and entwined her fingers on her lap, “I was staying in
a hotel. Altaf mian had accompanied me. Meenakshiji had refused to let me
travel alone.”

“You
mean our Altaf chacha?” Raj confirmed.

“Yes.
The wedding was in a suburban village. We rented a car, which Altaf mian drove to
go to the marriage venue, but enroute we had a flat tire. While he changed
tires, I stepped out to take a breather. We were on a road with forests on both
sides. I was just staring aimlessly when I noticed a red-colored cloth near a
tree. Curious…I stepped behind the tree. That’s when I saw her.”

“Naina?”
Raj whispered and bent forward to hold beeji’s hands.

Beeji
nodded, “She was barely alive. She had a head wound and scratches and cuts all over
the body; her wrists and ankles were bleeding. Clearly she was kept tied
somewhere. But the worst….” Her voice quivered to a stop before she continued, “…the
worst was the bullet wound on her shoulder.”

“She
was shot?” Raj was incredulous.

“Yes…and
she had lost a lot of blood. A little pouch lay beside her, which had her
family’s picture and some money. I called Altaf mian…and then both of us heard sounds
of a dog bark and a shot coming from farther back into the forest.”

“She
was being tracked.” Raj was horrified as the truth unveiled. Nothing in his
wildest dreams had prepared him for such a disclosure of what Naina had
endured. By this time he understood that she was running away from people who
were killers. Yet she had not given up. No, she wouldn’t. His Naina was a
fighter…he knew that about her. He felt a sudden surge of pride rush through
him

“Yes
Raj. Just then, for few seconds she opened her eyes and whispered, “Help me please.” There was no way we
could leave her. We realized we had to act fast. Her pursuants were not far
off. There are many Buddhist monasteries in Balrampur. We carried Naina to the
car and from there we went to the nearest monastery. I went and spoke with the
monks, requesting for an immediate medical help and also their silence if someone
came asking for her. One look at her and they understood. The monastery physician
gave Naina first-aid, but told us to go to a hospital as soon as possible, as
the bullet was still lodged in her shoulder. It was Altaf mian who suggested we go
not to Balrampur but to the next town, Sravasti, so as to evade whosoever
was after her. They were sure to enquire in Balrampur hospitals for a girl with
bullet wounds. In the meantime, I called Meenakshiji who arranged for Naina to
get medical help without any legal interference. She then arranged for a
chopper and we evacuated Naina to Lucknow the same night after the doctor had
taken out the bullet.”

Raj
closed her eyes or a few seconds and then said, “That was quick thinking between
the three of you. When did you change her name?”

“In
the hospital. There were two names in a message in the back of that picture,
which said, “On the terrace of our palace
with our princesses Nayantara and Mrinali.” I didn’t know which one was her
name, but somehow Nayantara fitted her so I changed it to Sunaina and gave her
my father’s surname, Bhatia. It was much later that she told me that her
parents indeed called her Naina.”

“Then
you got her here.” Raj said.

“Yes.
After a week. She didn’t speak much in those early days…just stared blankly…as
if emotions had died inside her. Doctors said she had undergone a major trauma
and so needed time to normalize. Her eyes would follow me, and I knew I could
not let her go. For some reason, God had sent me when she needed help, and she
had quickly become very dear to me. In her I saw the daughter I would have
wished to have with my husband.” Beeji paused, and Raj got up to get water for her.

“What
about her parents and sister, beeji? How did they die?”

“Naina
lived in Nainital with her family. They died in a car accident. Naina was in
college that time. A runaway truck pushed them down the side of a hill. Her
father’s body was found a little away from the car where he was thrown off. Her
mother and sister were inside the car still tied to the seat with seatbelt. The
seatbelt had jammed. They had died of their injuries.”

“Oh
God! That’s why she doesn’t put on a seatbelt.”

“After
the accident, her uncle, her father’s brother came and took her away to
Balrampur where he lived with his wife. After a few months they got her married
off.”

“And???”
Raj looked up when she stopped.

Beeji
shook her head, “That’s it. Naina never told me what happened to her in her
married life. How long she was there? How did her in-laws treat her? How was
her husband? Nothing.”

“But
Adi.”

“We
were here in Palampur for about two weeks when she fainted in the lawn. We
found she was pregnant. When I asked her about her husband, she gave me an
empty look and said, “He is dead.” To
this day I haven’t had the heart to probe her about her story, especially who was
she was running from. Who wanted her dead? And when I saw her embrace life and
become happy at the news of a child inside of her, I let the matter be.
Presence of Adi in her life infused life back into hers. When Adi was born, my
Naina didn’t look back. She told me once, “Beeji,
I know you have questions. Please trust me when I say that it’s best if I let
that time of my life stay where it is. I don’t want to look back anymore. I will not have my past dictate our future, especially Adi’s”…And
that’s how it has been. I respect her wishes. We never spoke about why and how
of that part of her life again. But now?” Beeji stared at Raj with worried
eyes.

“Now
the past seems to have sniffed her out. It’s OK thus far. I have ensured that
reporter’s departure. So
Naina is safe for now.” Raj stood, pulling beeji up. “Thanks beeji. This
helps me understand Naina better. You go and sleep now. We’ll decide tomorrow
how to get her to tell us about the missing months of her life.”

Raj walked beeji to
the guest room and then took a peek in Naina’s room. She was asleep but her
brows were drawn in a frown. He went and smoothened the crease and then couldn’t
help stroking her cheek with the back of her knuckles. “You aren’t alone
anymore Naina,” he whispered, “I am with you. We’ll see this through together.
You will have to trust me a little and let me in.” He bent and kissed her
forehead and left.

****************************************

“Where
are you sneaking off to?”

“Sheesh!
You scared me Raj. Why are you up so early? It’s 5:30.”

“I
could ask the same to you.”

“You
could.”

“And?”

“What?

“Naina!”

“Raj!”

“Did
you just roll your eyes at me?”

“Maybe.”

“Naina,
you are not well. You can’t scoot off alone somewhere in the wee hours of the
morning after you fainted.”

“You
are not my guardian Raj. And if you are short-sighted, let me tell you, I am an
adult and am capable of taking my decisions.”

“Right.
What should I tell Adi and beeji when they wake up?”

“Nothing.
I left a note for beeji telling her that I am going to Asha Deep.”

“For
what.”

“I
am meeting someone.”

“Who?”

“Oh
for heaven’s sake Raj. I have to meet Baldevji on an urgent matter.”

35 comments:

That was a terrifying part of Naina's past that she has to fear all the time. Who could have treated her so cruelly and what might have happened in her married life? very very curious to know further...please continue soon - scorpiodreams

Hey pal...This has been a really busy week workwise . I haven't been able to attend to the blog at all. Thanks a bunch...Need those words and those hugs all the time.

Naina is suppressing her past...good as well as evil. She doesn't even want to talk about her parents/sister cause talking about them would lead to recalling their deaths and then the aftermath. So she finds safety in turning her back. She has resolved to lead a normal happy life with Adi and beeeji and that's what she is doing. But then that journalist came and raked the memories.

Aww sorry to hear about your hectic week Love! but I'm happy to know that I was indirectly able to ease it a little with my words and HUGS :-) xox...Hope u have a great weekender!

Exactly for her to be able to heal Naina will have to share her painful past with someone and give one good cry letting out all her pinned up emotions it will be hard but she'll have to do it in order to defend herself and Adi when her past catches up with her...I know that Raj will be there for her come what may :-)

Gosh Indu this was such an emotional part. Naina faints in Raj's presence and that makes him try to uncover as much about her past as he can find and once he hears her story from Beeji he is sure that he doesn't want her to have to face it ever again. Love this soft, caring side of Raj and his determination to prevent any harm from coming her way. Aww Naina tries to sneak away but is caught in the act by Raj. Fab job as always and can't wait to see what is in store next.

What a traumatic past! Feel so proud of her ability to still embrace life and continue happily for Adi!!! Raj doesn't say his feelings to the two ladies.....but am glad he will be there for her!!Fantastic update Indu!!!

Thanks Bharthi. You said the right words for Naina. When she was totally broken, God sent her first beeji and then Adi. She never looked back after that...until now. She has been a fighter..otherwise she wouldn't have been able to escape from whatever hell-hole she was in. And looks like, she is fighting back again, this time preempting the threat.

Just came her to see ur response on my last comment, but nothing seems to appear :( But it's okay i know ur busy, at least I saw the new update. :)

Nwei, I feel like am becoming talkative lately, so i just make it a short one (sorry).It was such a heart breaking moment.. I feel sad to know about Naina's past. Very horrible, so scary!Am glad Beeji revealed Naina's secret to Raj, although it's not the whole thing.But it will surely help him to protect Naina. Looks like Beeji and Ranima are expecting something more from Raj. Yeah, they knew it's beyond friendship.Will Naina go to Asha Deep with Raj or not?

Ah sweetie, please continue talking any amount....Your words are candy to me. I look forward to the responses and cannot thank enough all my friends who take time out without fail to write a few words. That alone keeps me motivated to continue.

Ranima and beeji have seen the world and have experience on their sides. One look and they know that what they wished for is happening. Raj and Niana have clicked thus far. However, the question is will Naina allow their relationship to go beyond friendship?

Great and emotional update Omg...Naina had a such terrific past..Loved Raj taking care nainaLast part interesting...Naina tries to sneak but caught by rajOnce again superb update diContinue soonEagerly waiting for next part Thanks for pm

Oh my goodness, that was a terrifying one. This part of Naina's life was so heartbreaking. :( She didn't want the past to affect them thus buried it deep down inside her. That person she met awaken her fears once again. She needs to share her bitter past which is eating her from the inside. :(

Brilliantly written chapter Indu. Waiting to read more as naina's past unfolds.

Thanks Abie. Yes...absolutely right about Naina. When she realized she was carrying Adi, she had made a decision...that the past will stay where it is, and that she will never allow it to come in the way of a happy life with her son and beeji. But this threat from the past has jolted her out of her complacency.

If Raj's story was bad, Naina's was positively terrifying. And we know only the half of it. But atleast now she has Raj, he will be her knight in shinning armour.Love their bickering in the end. So cute.

A visually satisfying, expertly, executed, plot which offers an exhilarating and psychological unfolding of Naina's traumatic past; yet to be explored even further. Once Raj gets the primordial urge to delve deeper, she'll eventually open her mouth and let it all fall out. By expressing his tender affection and unconditional love to Naina, what a considerate guy he is! Heart-wrenching and spine-chilling, I'm beginning to wonder if Naina has ever been sexually, verbally or physically abused.

Heartbreaking past of Naina. What is yet to come out from Naina must be more cruel and painful. Love, patience and trust from Raj can melt the walls to open up. Will be eager to know how Raj will help Naina since he has got to know a leaf of her past.

Naina has walled everyone out from the goriest phase of her life. She had to do it in order to survive. So far she was all alone in dealing with it, but now she has this man who keeps saying he is there for her.

Love this update so much we found out a bit of Naina's past, those horrible people who treated her like and animal, beeji is such a gem of a person, Raj concern for Naina is so much more than a friend love is growing there.So sorry for the late response FriendHope you and your family had a happy DiwaliSharlene/ sb1410

thats an awesome update indu di.........i dont know what to say .........how to feel i cant imagine what naina went through though itis clearly indicating that she had been abused....but why the hell they want to kill her is the question even after going a lot through thisstill she embraced her lifewith so much of positivity and never ever let her past fears affect adi.......she is such a great soul di i love her ...........

and raj now he gonna help her protect her ..........befriend her so that she will share her greatest fears with him..........i m sensing something change in rajs perception of naina......may be he started to care her morethan he ever cared anyone and deep inside he felt peace with her presence and her smile means a lot to him ..........but her fear troubles him makes him restless.........

hope raj will soon go through the depth of her past and let her move on from there .......without any fear

Thanks Rosey.. I love how you review the update and then pen your interpretations. Raj has strong feelings for Naina, but he won't express them till Naina has this fear in her life. So he offers her the assurance of his friendship and protection instead.

I read all the chapters in one go..I already in love with this story. It's so nice. I love Raj and Naina's character and how they help each other in their insecurities and fear..I'm sorry I'm not a good commentor but all I can say is I loe this story so much and waits for it each day!Kate

Thank you for welcoming me Indu. Though it's not Yash and Aarthi it's about Raj and Naina.I watched some parts of left right left in you tube and I started to like that couple. when I started reading this I imagined them and soon as your story is soo beautiful I got glued to it. Thanks a lot for sharing this wonderful story with us and thanks for giving us the link through the forum dear!

Hi Kate...You know when I began this story, someone mentioned that TV serial. Frankly, I have not seen it, so couldn't comment on it. I come from a very fauji family, so wanted to make my protagonist have an army background.

Thanks again for such sweet compliments. I really appreciate it. Lots of hugs.

ch 10 a tear for raj pain Somewhere the misery she had faced for the little angel she is in love with and for adi who is a rising sun And, Raj is always there stands besides her to give his wisdom and strengthwell absolutely divine pipping ceremony i will saysomehow unintentional raj touched on the scary painful chordsAnd then it is actually a nightmare yet enlightening for raj to know about Naina past n relay all tensed up while reading and holding hands to keep myself calm di you know i am kind a scared you really freaking awesome di i still wonder its just beginning then what more is there hidden by naina herself and bearing all her lil heart can Everybody needs saviour angel and i hope raj and tanu will be there and forever now on....regards..riya