Nigel Farage today welcomed the news that only English MPs can vote on laws that affect England. After an intense debate in the House of Commons the proposal went through with a count of 312 to 270. Farage who wasn't there commented "If I had been there I would have voted for it as well, so really it is 313 to 270 isn't it" as though his opinion even fucking mattered.

When informed that since he lost his seat his vote doesn't count anymore, Farage countered "I see your point, but the fact is that I have the monopoly on saying English things for the English. England first is my motto. While I was still clinging onto my meagre political power I had to cost up to those Jocks, Taffs and Paddies, but now I have literally no influence whatsoever, I can say what I really think, and that is that I hate them all just as much as I hate the blacks and Polish"

Image Credit: telegraph.co.uk

When pressed on what point he was actually trying to make, Farage continued to babble incoherently "Listen, I'm no racist, I just don't like people who are different in any way, shape or form. Especially the blacks."

Britain First were approached for a comment but their secretary, Elizabeth Whites-Awnly told us they were organising another march about mosques or making memes about animal cruelty probably.