Tuesday, November 20, 2012

As we head into Thanksgiving
celebrations, GetEQUAL and Out4Immigration are highlighting just a few
of the stories of binational same-sex couples and the struggles they
encounter daily in order to be together. This is the first in the
series, and we’re thankful to Charles and
Mauricio for sharing this story…

Dreaming a Dream — Charles and Mauricio

Early in 2011, I was doubting whether I would ever
meet Mr. Right. I was 47 at the time, and decided to simply give up
after years of trying, and just enjoy life as best I could and without
fulfilling my dream of a family of my own.

About a month later, I went out with a few of my best friends for
dinner and dancing. I was minding my own business when I looked up and
saw the most beautiful smile light up across the room as my eyes
accidentally locked with a stranger’s. I assumed he was looking at
someone else, so I just kept dancing with my friends – until they began
insisting that he was looking at me. My friend pushed me toward him, we
introduced ourselves, danced a bit, and exchanged email addresses. I
couldn’t hear a word he said over the music, but I didn’t need to.

Within a few days, we went out on our first date and – even with a
language barrier – we knew from that moment that we would be together
forever. He was in California to hone his skills in journalism and learn
English – and, though he had a six-month tourist visa – he had only
intended to stay for three months. At the end of those three months, he
called up his family, let them know he had fallen in love, and decided
to stay with me for the subsequent three months. It was truly love at
first sight.

As our relationship grew, we began to more fully understand the scope
of our situation – as a binational same-sex couple, we had no way to be
together in the United States and, as a small business owner with aging
parents, it would be hard for me to go to Brazil. He went back to
Brazil for almost three months in order to apply for a student visa –
while we waited to hear word about whether we would ever be able to see
one another again. It was one of the worst days of my life when I took
him to the airport – and had to simply hope that we would see each other
soon.

After much interrogation in Brazil, Mauricio was granted a student
visa. On November 22, 2011, Mauricio came back to the U.S. and we
celebrated Thanksgiving and Christmas at my mother’s house. It was so
wonderful to be together again – though we know that our time together
carries with it an expiration date.

We will celebrate the holidays this year together as a family as we
dare to let ourselves dream of the family we want to become. We have
decided on a date for our marriage ceremony, invited our friends and
family to join us, and know that – one day – we want to adopt a child
together to expand our family and share our love. Even as we dare to
dream those dreams, we know that reality means the government will not
recognize our relationship, leaving the country is not an option, and
our life hangs in the balance each day. We can’t take the real and
concrete steps to make our dreams a reality so long as our life together
is at the mercy of the U.S. government.

Our story is one of true love – we’ll fight for our right to love one
another and build a life together, even while the government fights to
keep us apart. Our days together are numbered, but all we can do is
fight with all we have – we have no other options. Though I was born and
raised in the land of the free and the home of the brave, I now know
what it is like to be considered a second-class citizen. We’re calling
on the United States to strike down the discriminatory Defense of
Marriage Act (DOMA) and to ensure that LGBT families are included in
comprehensive immigration reform so that we can all be equal under the
law and dare to dream our dreams.

Are you a same sex binational couple? Do you have families / friends affected by this issue? Please contact us at http://bit.ly/O4ICountMeIn if you are interested in sharing your story.

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The Out4Immigration Blog

We are a volunteer grassroots organization that addresses the widespread discriminatory impact of U.S. immigration laws on the lives of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and HIV+ people and their families through education, outreach, advocacy and the maintenance of a resource and support network.

NO U.S. citizen should be forced to choosebetween country and partner!