Monday, July 9, 2012

Not physically, not anything outward. I’m not really sure. I think my brain is empty. I think someone has robbed me. I think I’ve robbed myself. I’ve ripped out all of my memories and shoved them into a camera and I have none in my brain anymore. They’re there of course, because I have the photographs; I’ll always have the photographs.

Sometimes I cry because I can’t remember a moment. Maybe that’s why I take pictures. To keep a moment that I don’t even remember - I have it in photograph form just so I know it existed at some point. To know that all of this isn’t fake, that I’m not some sort of figment of my imagination.

Maybe that’s why I photograph myself; to prove to myself that I’m actually real. I want to know that I’m there. But I don’t see my outer body, it’s like someone has turned me inside out. My mind is on the outside, but it’s falling apart.

Maybe I take photographs to keep my mind from falling right out of my head.

Bio

"Amber Ortolano is an Italian-American photographer, known for her self-portraiture work. Born in Honolulu, Hawaii in 1996, Amber has been photographing since the age of 11. She has traveled across the United States throughout most of her life - from Hawaii to Kentucky to Michigan to New York. Blessed by the current technology driven world, Amber's access to the internet has allowed her to connect with magazines, blogs, and other artists."