She said, she said: Why I sold my wedding dress

Dalia's turn: It's no secret that I've been trying to unload my wedding dress since I tied the knot nearly two years ago. After unsuccessful attempts to sell the gown in a consignment shop and on Craigslist, yesterday someone finally said yes to the dress! A friend of a friend named LaShonda, who is getting married in May, came to my house, tried on the gown, loved it and wrote me a check for my asking price, $250.

Over lunch this week, when I shared news of the transaction with the other Deal Divas, Nicole nearly choked on her salad. "WHY?!" she gasped.

So for Nicole and all the other haters out there, here are seven reasons why I said "I do" to selling my gown.

1. I'll never wear it again. Hubby and I are happily married. Even if we renew our vows one day, there's no way I'll shimmy into the same gown I wore down the aisle at age 25. Why compete with your younger self? (And for those of you who think remarriage may be in your future, you wouldn't really wear the same gown twice, would you?)

2. My daughter won't wear it, either. My mom's dress was hideously out of style by the time I tied the knot. So as beautiful as mine seemed in 2008, I'm sure my 10-year-old step-daughter (or any future daughters I may birth) will consider it an abomination by the time she weds.

3. I'm plenty sentimental. I have video and a gazillion pictures of myself in the dress from every angle, and they're much easier to store and display than the real thing. Then there are the cards, journals, ticket stubs and old e-mails I have documenting our relationship. I even photocopied the check I earned for selling the dress.

4. Why live in the past? The wedding was fun, but it was only one day of our lives. Hubby and I can use the $250 to create new memories. Maybe we'll splurge on a fancy dinner or take a weekend getaway.

5. I was sitting on a goldmine. Okay, so $250 isn't exactly enough for me to give my boss the finger and jet off to San Tropez. But at least it's something. My gown was on sale for $500 at David's Bridal. On top of that I paid about $100 for alterations and another $125 to have it cleaned after my big day. We've talked about how we're unwilling to pay big bucks for jeans, but at least those are versatile. And I know, I know -- you can't put a price on love. But a wedding dress isn't love. It's fabric.

6. I want the space. Anti-clutter guru Peter Walsh says that if something is truly important to you, then you'll give it a place of honor. For nearly two years, my gown has been stuffed into a closet with a vacuum cleaner and Christmas decorations.

7. It has a great new home. I admit, when LaShonda stepped into the gown, I thought, This is actually happening and began to have second thoughts. But then I saw the way she looked at herself in the full-length mirror. "I feel like a princess," she kept saying as I laced up the back. She called her friends to tell them she'd found The One. She called her tailor to ask about getting it hemmed. She was as happy as -- well, a bride -- and I was happy for her. My dress would never have brought anyone that much joy just hanging out in my closet with the vacuum. By this time next year, LaShonda will have her own photo album full of memories in the dress. So if anyone plans on tying the knot in the fall of 2010, I know where you can get a great deal on your gown...

***

Nicole's turn: "Why!?" I exclaimed when she told us the news.

Yes, Deal Diva Dalia is correct when she said I choked on my salad when she told me she sold her wedding dress. For me parting with my wedding dress would be like giving my dog away. Sure, it would make my life easier, but it would be horribly painful.

I'll admit, my situation is a tad different. My seamstress aunt made my wedding dress, as she has for all the young women in my family for their big day. We designed it together, picked out the ivory poire de soir fabric and rhinestone buttons. I stayed up all night with her as she made the pattern. Through the process my aunt gave me morsels of wisdom about marriage and life. So in the end, the dress was more than something I wore on my wedding day, it was symbolic of my rites of passage from a single girl to a wife.

Will my daughter want to wear the dress when she gets older? Perhaps not. I mean she doesn't exist yet, so of course we don't have an answer to such things. But I do want to give her the option. And if she doesn't maybe my niece will or who knows...a future daughter-in-law perhaps?

The point is in this world people don't put a lot of time into much. And ritual and tradition are about as rare as a 5 year celebrity marriage. So, for me, the hassle of storing my dress on a bust in my closet until a worthy cause arises is a small duty.

About the bloggers

Looking for shopping deals in Tampa Bay? The Deal Divas are on the prowl, sniffing out hot fashion finds that won't leave your wallet in ruins. Now you never have to miss a shopping deal! Check in often for the lowdown on local bargains, as well as fashion advice, fun photos and style news. Disclaimer: The content of this blog is produced by the editorial staff of the Times and is not tied to advertising. Email us ideas you'd like us to write about.

Stephanie Hayes, addicted to heels for 15 years, has been experimenting with ballet flats, boots and cute sneakers lately. Her poor, tired feet thank her. She can never get enough animal print, and her eye shadow collection has become a bit of a hoard. While other kids were reciting multiplication tables, she was learning to calculate an extra third off the half-price discount during buy-one-get-one week. She knows a healthy swipe of red lipstick can make any outfit better. She can be reached at (727) 893-8716 or shayes@tampabay.com.

Katie Sanders foolishly spurned pretty dresses and shoes as a child, tossing new clothes over her shoulder at birthday parties with a totally rude "no, thank you." Her drab days of monocolor outfits are over now, and she certainly knows better than to turn down free stuff. Her wardrobe mixes classic with quirk. Think blazers with statement necklaces, and lots of patterned ballet flats. She can be reached at (727) 893-8037 or ksanders@tampabay.com.

A compulsive deal scourer, Michelle Stark is trying to evolve her style philosophy from grab-it-because-it's-cheap-and-worry-if-it-fits later to one that embraces quality staples and more color. When it comes to her closet, it's generally still quantity over quality, but she recently splurged on a treasured pair of Lucky jeans. Progress! Her style leans toward classically cutesy - think Loft, The Limited and Banana Republic, blouses with bows, blazers with polka dots and all the skinny jeans in sight. But she never turns down a trip to a thrift store, or JC Penney. Her greatest sartorial sale achievement was finding her senior prom dress on clearance for $20. She can be reached at (727) 893-8829 or mstark@tampabay.com.

Kathryn Varn spends most of her fashion energy at thrift stores, flea markets and sale racks at the mall. Her style has ranged from "preppy Hollister defender" to "eclectic hippie aunt," but she has since landed on "vintage career woman who wears sun dresses on the weekends." Her proudest secondhand find was a 1950s blue tea length skirt dotted with sunflowers from Brooklyn Flea, but there will always be a special place in her heart for the pair of high-waisted Levis she cut into jorts during college. Her closet is full of fur-fringed coats from her grandmother, and maybe one day, she'll live in a place cold enough to actually wear them. She can be reached at (727) 893-8913 or kvarn@tampabay.com.

Katherine Snow Smith’s closet is filled with colorful patterns from a Lilly halter with pink and yellow giraffes to a maxi dress with oversized flowers and peace signs. She likes many styles — bohemian, preppy, vintage, classic — as long they’re unique and on sale. She’ll splurge at Saks or Anne Fontaine but favorite spots are T.J. Maxx and consignment stores. Her best purchase? A one-sleeve kaleidoscope-print Valentino blouse from the Sloan Kettering hospital resale shop in New York. (Legend has it Jackie O. used to drop her discards there.) When Katherine was 14 she bought a $29 oversized, velvet-covered anthology of Oscar fashion. She can be reached at (727) 409-3642 or kssmith@tampabay.com.

Lisa Gartner grew up wearing her older brother's clothes (hey Dan!) and kind of never stopped: She still has a few of his button-downs hanging in her closet; luckily his No Fear shirts have been lost to time and sense. A reformed tomboy, Lisa likes to mix masculine and feminine pieces. Her work look is, more often than not, Oxfords with pencil skirts. She owns more baggy sweaters than there are days below 70 degrees in Florida. The bags under her eyes are knock-offs. She can be reached at (727) 893-8707 or lgartner@tampabay.com.

Maggie Duffy got her love for fashion from her mama, and her mama's mama. While she's fond of wearing jewelry handmade by artists, you'll often catch her rocking $1.50 bamboo doorknocker earrings. Bamboo is actually a big motif in her style. Her love of color is evidenced by the many iterations of her hair, which she's having a blast with. She thought her sneaker game was on point until a recent trip where she saw just what she's been missing, so she's resigned herself to work that out. Her personal style can be described as street meets sweet. Years of working retail taught her never to buy full price. She can be reached at (727) 893-8572 or mduffy@tampabay.com.