Raise Your Hand If You've Done This

Occasionally, when I am waiting in line to pay for groceries, I start ogling the cleavage of the cover models on magazines such as Vogue and Cosmo, and often I forget that these are not real three-dimensional women, and crane my neck to try to see further down their skimpy blouses . . . only to realize that I am looking at a two-dimensional representation and that no matter how I tilt my head, I'm not going to see a nipple.