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Sunday, November 8, 2009

The Man With the Golden Torc by Simon R. Green

Synopsis From Dusk Jacket:

All those things you heard about as a kid? The boogeyman under the bed? The creature in the closet? The ghost in the...er...garage? They're for real, people.

Believe me, I know. I'm Eddie Drood. And if it weren't for me and my family, all he things that go bump in the night would be mucking the world up, big-time. For ages, the Droods have been protecting humanity. We're the ones who hold back the nightmares, lock the doors, bar the gates, throw away the keys, and put righteous boot to monster arse on a nightly basis. And you poor sods don't even know we exist.

Usually, I'm proud to be a Drood. right now, though, I'm not so sure.

It seems that one of my nearest and dearest has convinced the rest of the family that I've gone off the deep end, and that humanity needs to be protected from me. So I"m on the run, using every trick in the book, magical and otherwise, hoping I live long enough to prove my innocence. My chances? Not bad, I'd say.

After all, the Droods are determined and deadly sort-and I'm one of them.

I've heard some wonderful things about this author, normally about his Deathstalker and Nightside series, so when I saw this on the bargain table at Barnes & Noble, I had to get it. I am so glad I did.

This book had to be one of the funnest I've read in a long time. The character of Eddie Drood is what James Bond could have been had he been set in a urban fantasy world full of demons, monsters, aliens, and elves. The family even has a Q like character called the Armourer, who comes up with some of the coolest gadgets. Cars that not only have machine guns but can drive through other dimensions, snow globes that can unleash world destroying blizzards, and a stick that can break any bond simply by hitting something with it. Of course that's only the tip of the iceberg.

The whole premise of the book is that Eddie is sort of a black sheep of the family who is suddenly recalled back to the homestead for some unknown reason. The relationships are rather strained and he is more than happy to accept and be on his way. However once he leaves the manor he is attacked by all sorts of bad guys. Elves (who are evil in this series), demons who have taken the shape of cars, UFOs, and the ghosts of cars wrecks are amongst the many villains who try to take him out. He destroys all of them and gets away. Once he realizes he's been set up by the family matriarch (his grandmother) he sets out to find out what's going on.

Along the way of self discovery he meets up with some old friends and enemies including a sex cult bent on world domination, a psychic vampire named Subway Sue, Mr. Stab (think Jack the Ripper who can't die), the Blue Fairy (gay half Elf hooked on drugs), and Molly the Witch of the Wild Woods (the love interest of the book). Most of them have tried to kill him at one time or another but he needs them to discover the truth about his family. Once he discovers the truth all hell breaks loose and nothing is sacred anymore.

I loved this book and I loved the next in the series which I've already read (review forthcoming). I highly recommend it to anyone who likes a lot of humour with their supernatural action.