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Fianna Fail in boyant mood

At a press conference last night, Fianna Fail stated that they were delighted with the latest poll results which give them a resounding support of 13%.

Brian Lenihan stated that they were delighted with the results of the poll, as the figures are higher than expected.

“We are making difficult desisions and are taking the pain before moving forward” he stated. “Polls have a margin for error of three percent, so when you add that in, we are way ahead of Fine Gael who are languishing at 32%”

Asked about Brian Cowen’s support which is at an all time low of 8%, he said that Mr Cowen was in boyant mood, and was currently attending a meeting of the Fianna Fail inner circle in the back room of Lonergan’s Bar.

“Fianna Fail have never taken much notice of polls,” Mr Lenihan went on. “They never take account of our core support in the graveyards of Ireland. The dead have always voted for us and will continue to do so in these difficult times. The real poll will come in the next election. We must move forward.”

“The country is on a definite road to recovery,” Mr Lenihan continued.

“Tax take is up on last year by €423, after the Revenue Comissioners discovered that Pat Hanrahan of Castleisland was claiming a tax rebate for minding his dead mother. We will not tolerate tax evasion” he said.

“The green shoots are showing. We have taken the difficult forwards and the time is right to move decisions. We are moving in the right direction.”

The €423 rebate is about as significant as the big splash on the news about the tax defaulters – what was the total owed by seventy-odd people – about €1 million? What about the billions made to disappear by Seanie, Fingers and co?

For Willie. Just been to the Paki store to get me a bottle of Cutty to get me thro the evening. They were out of it, so money being tight and Jameson being $25 I got myself a bottle of Mac Albert Scotch 80 proof for $14.99. Blended and distilled in the Dominican Republic. Strangest thing. Half way thro it and it isn’t half bad.