Getting my daughter to sleep during day and night is turning into a battle

Maria - posted on 06/17/2010
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Just latley over the last 2 weeks putting Kaelyn down for a sleep during the day is turning into a major mission, she is 20months old now and I think she still needs her day sleeps, as she is a major mess if she doesn't, by 4pm she has a break down, but it can take anywhere between an hour or 2 to get her to fall asleep, in and out of bed, running around her bed, she just don't want to sleep, I mean I always win but it takes so long, any ideas? Any one else have this problem?? Not only that but at night it always seems to be a huge battle just getting her to go to sleep and then she wakes at 5am I just can't work it out please any comments welcome =)

This is going to sound harsh but... My partner and I had the exact same problem with my daughter. This is what we did, hard at first but got easier. Obviously start the routine up, do this at the same time every day for the day naps and for night time sleeps. We put Lily in bed and said "night-night darling, have a good sleep." Gave her a quick kiss, give her her favorite toy/s (iggle piggle and upsy daisy lol) and a bottle of milk. Leave the room. If she cries, let her cry. If she is still crying after 5 minutes we go in and say firmly, but not in a "your in trouble voice" Night-Night Lily, its time for you to have a sleep now hunny. And leave the room. If she got out of bed, I put her back in bed without saying a word to her and left the room (tucked her in still though so she was comfortable) Each time you have to go back in the room make your voice a bit firmer. At the third time going into the room I sat next to the bed and told her "If you keep having a tantrum then Im going to take away Igglepiggle, now night-night Lily" Give her a kiss and leave Keeps crying, take away igglepiggle. Keeps crying, tell her I will take away upsy daisy. Keeps crying, take away upsy daisy. Keeps crying... well I havent reached that yet, normally she goes to sleep after I take igglepiggle. I also found that turning her on her side so she was facing the wall helped and having a bit of light in the room (she was a lot worse at night so we tried having the hall light on and she slept through the light so we think she was scared of the dark)I hope that helped!

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Sophie - posted on 07/03/2010

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I think you need to do the Supernanny routine as the lady said before :) When my little girl was born i put her to bed every night without rocking or a bottle. So now at 20months she goes to bed on time every night. I say, bedtime...and she runs to the stairgate reasy to go up. Walks into the bathroom ready for teeth and she goes to bed with eyes wide awake and doesnt make a sound. She gets a goodnight kiss and kind words of course.And hugs all day long :) Soon i will start reading to her before bed, but trying potty training first. Good luck and be firm. At first its hard but once they know your not giving in it will settle down :)

I'm afraid many of you may not agree with me but here's my 2 cents: everybody agrees each child is different. But why are we so adamant about following the same routine?

My husband and I struggled very, very hard when my daughter was that age, trying to get her sleep by 8pm. She never did. Every night it took us at least one or one and half hours to get her to sleep. She just wouldn't stop crying. We followed the similar strategy over and over and over and finally we left her crying hysterically for 40 minutes until she eventually was too exhausted to stay awake. Day after day we did this, week after week. At the end I willingly let go. I believe sleep early does good to her development but giving out tough-love that way hurt her too. We then adjusted the routine to fall more into her body clock and the battle wasn't there anymore. She still slept enough hours though, just down a bit late and up a bit late.

My son, who's 20 month old, is the total opposite. He's always right on the schedule, even sometimes goes to sleep before 8!

So I believe every child is different. They do need routine but it has to be custom-made, not just from what a book or a nurse says. Only the parents know their own unique little angels so be gentle and understanding with them. Find a balance between what they're supposed to do and what they're capable of doing.

After all they're only gonna be babies for a short time you'd rather have sweet memories of them giggling and cuddling with you more than crying and being shut out by you.

Wow I thought I was the only one with this problem! My son has a routine, but as soon as he knows I start with the routine he starts crying because he knows is time for bed. I think this is part of this stage development and I certainly will also follow some of the advises, thank you moms!

I agree with Tessa. I started putting my 20 mth baby boy in his bed and kiss him good night. At first it started off very well. He would lay down on his stomach and play with his toys until he falls asleep. He is now going through these tantrums and I do the same thing, i go and check on him, kiss him again and tell him to give mummy a hug and that it is time that he go to sleep. He cries for a while but he would then lay down on his stomach and go off to sleep. I'm still having the problem with him getting up during the night, but i'm dealing with that.