My family is my ministry and this life is my calling. I'm trying to turn this ordinary responsibility into an extraordinary opportunity!

It's not quite a quiver full, but it's a start!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Mouths of Fire

I cannot express the sheer priviledge it is to be able to walk through life with such a strong group of women around me. The ways that they contribute to my life are beyond words. Well, technically it's not truly beyond words since with every post I am sharing a bit of wisdom that has been imparted to me at some point, but to be able to explain to the full extent how these women have changed my life and how they push me forward just can't be done. I have recently had the pleasure of meeting a woman who has a true gift for Scripture. She knows the perfect reference for anything you are searching for. I just love her for that. She has challenged me so much to study scripture and to pass it on to my children. She may think it's not a true "gift", but it has truly touched and changed me. This morning once again she used scriptures to change my mindset, to refocus my attention, and to begin my own personal journey of searching the Scriptures when it comes to the tongue.

I have shared openly of my struggle with my own tongue. I have challenged others, like I have challenged myself, to gentleness. I strive to remember that a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh words stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1). How often do we allow ourselves to give in when our flesh is bowed up with pride, when our face is red with anger, when we feel that we just have to defend ourselves against something?We so easily give in to the harsh words that are seering into our tongue completely forgetting that we are to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry (James 1:19).

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The tongue is like a match. Once lit it has the ability to completely destroy its surroundings (James 3:5), but it also has the ability to bring light. It is up to us what we do with our words becausewith our words we can bring life or we can bring death (Prov. 18:21). God created the world with His words while Satan used his words to tear it down (Gen 1-4). Whose example are we following?

Every relationship is built with words and the power of our words should never be underestimated. With our words relationships grow and flourish or with our words relationships can end. The greatest of our relationships we have here on Earth is that with our family. We should be guarding this relationship with everything we have to ensure this bond remains strong and united, but so often it is with those we should be guarding the closest that we feel the urge to let our tongue go.

I am the victim of amygdala hijack. As I shared in my gentleness challenge, I feel as if I turn into the beast from "Beauty and the Beast" almost like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. How funny then that science would actually explain these feelings of anger that rise up in me almost without warning? The amygdala is the emotional center of our brain. When we are faced with a "fight or flight" situation (any situation that our brain perceives as a threat), the brain literally bypasses the cortex or the "thinking" center and goes directly to the amygdala.The hormones and adrenaline then coursing through your body make thinking of a solution impossible. Logical thinking and judgement are thrown completely out of the window.

Now that we are all coming to the realization that we all are victims of this dreadful Mr. Hyde take-over, now we can truly examine why God instructed us to be slow to speak and slow to become angry. Wouldn't it stand to reason that the Creator of the human body would understand the way that our brain is wired? Would you believe that all it takes for you to overcome amygdala is for you to literally, be slow to speak and slow to become angry? All it takes to overcome amygdala hijack is to take a deep breath and allow your brain a few seconds to send the information back to the cortex for you to actually rationalize the situation.

I love when science and Scripture align (which they do quite often if you pay attention). So the next time someone pushes our buttons or we are faced with a particularly stressful situation how are we going to choose to handle it? When someone lights a match with their words are we going to use our words to pour gasoline on the fire, or are we going to choose to snuff it out? We can stir up even more anger with our reaction or we can force that anger away.

"And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself" James 3:6. As my wise friend shared this morning, we need to be having fire drills with our family. We need to prepare ourselves and our children for how we are going to react when there is a fire in our house. It is not a matter of "if" these fires are going to come, but of "when". In fact, I foresee a lot of fires raging in my household as my children grow, become opinionated, and their hormones take over. I think we will all be wise to learn, and to teach our children, "Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent." Proverbs 17:28.

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Love never fails!!!

Proverbs 31:10-12, 25-31

Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. Strength and honor are her clothing;she shall rejoice in time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.

He will bless the fruit of thy womb...

Deut. 7:13

Titus 2:1-8

Speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine. That the older men be sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience; the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things -- that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands that the word of God may not be blasphemed. Likewise, exort young men to be sober-minded in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility, sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you.

Ezekiel 36:26-27

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.

Psalm 127:3

What did you do today?

Today I was an explorer. I went on adventures to see the wonderful secrets of God's creation. I watched as the birds flew across the sky, listened as the wind blew through the trees, and felt the warmth of the sun upon my face. Today I was a chef preparing gourmet four-course meals the likes of which the finest restaurants have never seen. Today I was a teacher conducting experiments, revealing hidden truths, and watching the amazement of these lessons being learned for the first time. Today I was a student, a doctor, a friend, a performer. Today I was a MOM. And tomorrow I get to do it all over again!

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May I decrease as HE increases!

My Hope For You

My hope for you, my fellow mommies, is that you will go throughout your day encouraged by successes, challenged by failures, and thankful for your experiences. That you will learn to thank God in the bad as well as the good, that you will use the powers of the Holy Spirit to become the best you can be, and that you will live your life according to the purpose you were given when you were created in the image of God Himself. May you find encouragement here so you can face the hardships of being a mom, a wife, and an imperfect person trying to live purposefully in an imperfect world, with grace.