Went up to Lincoln Center today out of sheer confusion, plus, I guess, prurient interest. Far as I know, the history of "Crossover Partnerships" between these two fields consists of, A) Eddie Van Halen's recent work scoring a single porn film, B) the Tommy Lee/Pam Anderson sex tape, C) the much loved third act of Boogie Nights, a fictional film, and D) Snoop Dog, sorta - he appears in certain films but, according to those present this afternoon, never takes part (which led, somewhat sadly, to Evan Seinfeld asking quote, "what kind of message does that send?" unquote, and then proceeding to insinuate that Snoop is a homosexual, an inference that seems to me to be considerably more than just a stretch).

I will offer no further background on any of these characters - way too afraid to Google them, for one thing - except to say that this had to be, objectively, one of the more star-powered panels of the whole Marathon. Tera Patrick, by all accounts, is one of the top female actresses in the biz, with more name recognition across America than rival CMJ panelists Chuck D, George Clinton, and Janeane Garofalo combined. Taylor Wane, from England, is up there as well (according to her, she's in the AVN hall of fame); she also confessed, early on at the panel, to having had sex with former Guns N' Roses guitarist Slash during the band's Use Your Illusion era. Evan Seinfeld, newly married (in a classic Vegas ceremony, apparently) to Ms. Patrick, was once a mid-level rock star in the now-defunct metal act Biohazard. Finally, Midori, who didn't show, is eighties pop-star Jodi Whatley's sister-- her decision to use porn as a stepping stone to mainstream popularity and a singing career was once characterized in a 1998 David Foster Wallace essay as "grievously ill-advised," a prophecy which as far as I can tell has come completely, unambiguously true. Klein is a Penthouse corporate suit who looked bored, and Capps, who knows.

Few points of interest:

- The place wasn't nearly as full as you'd expect, given the reception porn stars tend to get when they're out in public. Best guess is that college music and pornography are in fact so not crossed-over that the trenchcoat-types simply didn't know the panel was happening.

- Wane, in particular, looks to have mainstream prospects (she's working on an album) due to being, although not pop-star beautiful (physically, she's an exact porn cliche: fake breasts, platinum blond hair, bizarre wardrobe, etc.), both hilarious and more intelligent than anyone else present: she had a spot-on riff on the hypocritical United States Marine Corps, which (according to her, anyway) simultaneously trains its marines to be brutally effective killers while forbidding them access to pornography, and another hilarious one about the low quality of the music in current adult cinema. So keep your eyes peeled.

- The panel took place in the exact same place as, I believe, where the symphony performs. We were ushered to our seats by elderly gentlemen in tuxedos; they looked considerably more dapper than Tera Patrick, who showed up in all black, including a fairly mangy fur coat that was difficult to even look at.

No one will be surprised to hear that overall, the thing wasn't very edifying. However, some of my skepticism of the whole thing eroded in the lobby outside the talk, which was crowded with girls in sexy outfits handing out piles of music-related swag for CMJ. Turns out I had attended a marketing seminar, which in retrospect I guess should've been obvious.