Another glorious morning here on the coast. I walked to work along the front and marvelled again at the detritus left by tourism. I have a lovely walk to the station, bordered for most of the way by the ocean, but I want more. I want to join the throng of people on Ryde pier waiting for the fast cat. Weekly commuting is not a long term proposition though, I need to change from well travelled to rarely travels. Fast cat commutes are just a step on the way to my pub watch out I’m coming to a community near you soon!

I have had some eclectic conversations with a friend lately that seem to have summed up the world of relationshits (that is not a spelling mistake). Once again the conclusion is that there are as many unhappy single women as there are men. This leads me to reconsider the options available to distinguish these groups. Perhaps we could generate lists and key people in each area could exchange them? Or how about a keyring with a symbol that makes it clear you’re available but only to real people. Actually scrub the keyring idea it is far to reminiscent of 1960’s swinger’s parties. A hat, a scarf, a tie? How about a T-shirt that says “I sleep alone but not through choice”. The trouble with all of these is that they attract the wrong sort of attention, I think I will write to Alan Sugar this is clearly a challenge worthy of the apprentice!

Because these are my conversations we have also debated the appropriate clothing for smurf hunting. Last night I was semi-convinced that a group of girls dressed as burgers were going to raid the local Ann Summers due to smurf shortage. Yes you read it correctly and for foreign/young readers a smurf is a blue creature with a white hat.

In other news I am trialling the cling film method of healing tattoos. In fairness to the method I should note that I used kitchen roll last night so may not have started well. First report is that the sensation of sweat leaking and dribbling down your leg is odd to say the least. Lefty seems to have forgiven me for tattooing but righty is still sulking painfully today.