The adventures of a single woman who combines ministry with parenting a special needs young adult.

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Teaching Self Control

Daughter struggles with self-control. For a month I've been giving her the money for her activities at program instead of having staff hold it for her. She spent too much at the second-hand store one week, but the rest of the weeks she's managed not to spend it all. I give her a little extra, in the hopes she'll learn to save money to buy something bigger. She wants a new computer, so I told her that if she saved $100, I'd help her buy one. She has saved $17 from program, and this weekend she counted all her change (which she doesn't consider to be "real" money), and discovered she has another $10. It will be interesting to see if she can manage to save $100. I'm pleased with the way the experiment is working thus far.
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Today we started a second experiment in self-control. I bought some reduced fat cheese sticks at the warehouse store and some beef sticks. I gave her 4 of each to put in the unlocked refrigerator downstairs. I also got out some of my half cup containers and put a larger frozen strawberry in each, and then put sugar free strawberry banana jello in with the strawberry. I gave her 3 of those to put in her refrigerator, and we have another 4 in the refrigerator up here. I explained that she could decide when to eat those things, and when they ran out, I'd give her more, provided she was being responsible about her eating.

She was pleased, and as far as I know, hasn't eaten anything yet. If she can learn self-control, it will open so many options for her. She continues to struggle with rapid cycling. She desperately wants to go out and do things, yet when we get home from an outing she has a huge meltdown. I hope we get the medication figured out quickly!

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About Me

I'm a pastor and a mother. I was ordained in October of 1985, and began serving this suburban congregation in October of 2010. In March of 1990 I was asked to take an almost 3 year old "for the weekend." Five years into the weekend I adopted her. Daughter carries a number of diagnoses: Reactive Attachment Disorder, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Central Auditory Processing Disorder, Bipolar, seizure disorder, and type 1 diabetes. She moved into a group home in November of 2011. She attends a sheltered workshop and sings in the church choir.

Followers

Important People and Places

Daughter became my foster child in 1990, shortly before she turned 3, and I adopted her when she was 8.

Capital is a state capital in the midwest. In October of 2010 I became pastor of a church on the edge of town.

Administrative Assistant is my keeper. She runs the office at the church, and at heart is an artist. She helps turn my crazy ideas into reality.

Program is where Daughter spends most of her days. She does some piece work and participates in some classes and activities. She'd like to get community employment, but still has some work to do to make that possible.

Sister Best Friend and I met in seminary. We vacationed together for a number of years, and then she got married. We still do some cooperative worship planning. She seves a church less than an hour away.

Far Away Sister is 4.5 years young than me. She lives across the country. She was an electrical engineer until she stayed home to raise Tall Niece and Nephew. Now that they are graduating, she is planning to become a high school math teacher.

Sister is 10 years young than me. She is divorced and the mother of Short Niece. She lives in the same state as Capital. She is a teacher.

Brother is 11 1/2 years younger than I am. He finally got married in February of 2009. He lives near Sister. They are the parents of Baby Nephew.