Take a Look, It’s in a Book: Everything You Wanted to Know About Sex and Were Afraid to Ask

There’s only so much information you can get without having first hand experience. When you’re a kid, you ask your friends, who typically don’t know any more than you do, and fill you in with some ridiculous idea of what they think sex, oral, or French kissing is. Unfortunately, the same usually holds true, even when you’re old enough to find out through other means. We tend to ask our friends for advice, rather than consulting any sort of real authority, and end up with a sometimes hilariously distorted idea of what constitutes good foreplay, or how to perform fellatio.

On the Lookout

However, in this regard, I find women tend to be more interested in searching out information, and women’s magazines and websites are constantly dishing up advice on new positions, sex and relationship tips, and romance advice. Women eat this kind of thing up. We’re all about improving, and for us, it’s not that we lack a technique, rather than we’d like to know how to better wow our man.

Men, on the other hand, seem to feel that it somehow reflects badly on themselves to be seen looking for information on foreplay, female orgasm, or any other sexually related technique. It’s almost as though, in this macho culture, a man is supposed to be born knowing how to bring a female to orgasm, every time, and leave a string of broken hearts behind him. In my experience, this is seldom, if ever, the case.

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Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Directions

Everybody needs to start somewhere, and it’s better to get correct information that actually works, rather than some dumb tip from a friend. There are really the most incredible “helpful” tips out there—a Coke douche to prevent pregnancy, using teeth during fellatio, using your nose during cunnilingus…etc. etc. With so many books available on everything from bedroom skills to erotic massage to keeping the flame alive, it’s mind-blowing that we continue to trust our friends at all!

Blast from the Past

The original sex guide is the Kama Sutra, a compendium of lovemaking skills differentiated by type. It details the different types of kisses, bites, and touches, even before going into positions! It’s a great way to jump-start your sexual prowess, as by learning a few of these styles, you’ll develop an arsenal that’s sure to please. It provides explicit guidelines on when to use each move, essentially, sex for dummies. A great bathroom read, as it has over one thousand different tidbits to investigate.

As far as the ever-elusive female orgasm, and oral technique, a book that has enjoyed great renown in both hetero-and-homosexual couples is She Comes First. It talks about the mechanisms at work behind female orgasm and gives a truly holistic view of the entire process. A quick read, and a good one if you’re in a committed relationship and you’re looking to bring it to the next level, plus it will benefit you in all your relationships to come. Cunnilingus skills never go to waste.

Talk to Me, Baby

An oldie but goodie for communication and relationships is Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus. While it definitely perpetrates continued gender dualities, it does give a very insightful look at the difference between male and female communications, and can give a man a much better idea of what a woman wants, and why she’s acting the way she does, plus vice versa for a woman.

These are just a few starters for you sexual students out there. There are many more options to choose from, one for every interest. (TRY: Orgasm Dysfunction Help Books) There’s no shame in teaching yourself how to do things, and the results are truly worthwhile. Plus, you’ll have the option of telling your partner anything you want, when she asks where you learned all your tricks. Make it interesting!

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