Found pictures of ex wife

I am very happily married. My first marriage was not so happy. But at least early on my ex was pretty freaky and let me take a lot of pictures. She turned out to be a terrible person and damn near ruined my life. Then I met my current wife whom I am still crazy about. I legitimately felt awful when, 8 years ago, she stumbled upon a box of pictures of my ex, many of which included me doing very dirty things with her. (These were mostly polaroids from my college years, before the age of digital cameras). It was packed away in a storage space, and I hadn't looked at it in years. After I smoothed things over, I burned the box and its contents. However, when I realized that my first marriage was ending, I feared she might ask for those pictures, so I scanned them all and burned them onto a CD. That night I found that disc and broke it in half. Those pictures did not exist in any form anymore, and I was fine with that.

Last week I was looking for some old files of financial documents. I thought they might be on an old thumb drive I found sitting in a box I hadn't opened in several years. I didn't find the files I was looking for, but I did find the pictures of my ex. I honestly don't remember putting them there, but apparently I did. I started looking through them, and before I even realized what I was doing, I had my erect p**** in my hand. I thought about how awful she was to me, and how I still didn't want her back. In fact, I wanted nothing to do with her. I hadn't thought of her this way since I met my wife, but I suddenly wanted to f*** her. Hard. I wanted her to beg for it. I wanted to make it hurt. I wanted to treat her like the trash she is. I looked at the pictures of her with my c** on her face and wanted to do it again, and then watch her wipe it off in shame as I laugh at her. I wanted her to hate it, but at the same time I wanted her to love it so much it drives her crazy. I've never had a sexual experience driven by such negative emotion, and I came harder than I ever have before (at least by myself). I have masturbated to those pictures every day since. I'm really starting to feel about it, so I've decided to cut myself off. Not quite yet, but soon. I promise. But I haven't decided yet if I'll destroy the pictures. It's such a rush knowing I have them.

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I fantasize about my ex wife all the time. I truly loathe her, but I want to f*** her now more than I ever did when we were together. I think about her when I f*** my wife. I remember smelling her ass when I f***** her from behind. I think about that when I f*** my wife from behind. Their bodies are very similar, and I imagine my ex's t*** as I squeeze my wife's and think of her thighs pressed against my face as I eat out my wife. My wife is a million times better of a woman, but I wish I could f*** my ex once a year.

1 month ago

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I still have a few pictures of my ex wife. We're still on good terms and both remarried. She kindly asked me to delete them when we got divorced, and I told her of course I would. I did not. Even though we were wrong for each other and I have no desire to have her back, I wish I could still have s** with her. My current wife is right for me in every possible way, but the few times a year I see my ex, I can't help but imagine the things we did together. And it's not just seeing her. Her scent and her voice trigger something in me. I want to just f*** her brains out and then go about our separate lives. I'll have to settle for the pictures.