petokey:You know u aint telling urself the truth. How wil you know if a guy is not a virgin? Please i should not be misunderstood, aside sentiment, when u look at life generally, u wil know that life has not been to the female gender. I hav no choice than to say am proud to be a male and lucky as well. So ladies protect ur pride and we will give u ur respect.

And you think it's just an African thing? I repeat, these are the consolations or maybe your points aren't clear enough. How is a lady dis-virgined? You said it doesn't mean she's promiscuous and whotnot. How do we have something larger than a candle stick penetrate a lady? Self servicing? Intimacy? I don't know what can justify your claims of been moral and not promiscuous. Don't tell me about hymen tear because that's an infinitesimal measure.

Has it ever occurred to you that this "non-virgin" may have been molested or r&aped against her own will? Has it ever occurred to you that she may have done it for the first time, naive as she was only to realize she made a mistake and never indulged in such an act again, only to be castigated by her society because she's not a virgin? Should she go and hide her face because she's not holy?

To all theNigerian ladies outthere, the factthat he's notrich and hasnothing doing to show for his hardwork doesnot make himany less of aman withoutany iota ofdiligencewhatsoever, ibelieve so manynigerian ladiesor particularlythe african oneplaces too muchemphasis onwhether aman is rich or not.There are someself-proclaimedrich men andsometimes youhave to wonderif this "richman" has been smokingthe biggest bluntof them all,because hisactions andmanner of approach speakotherwise, andthen there aresome menwho aren'trich and youhave to wonderwhether he'slying to savemoney or justashamed of his wealth.Nigerian ladiesand womenwhat i'm tryingto say is peoplechange, as thesaying goes theonly thingconstant in thislife is change.People change allthe time, justbecause he'shad not sopleasant financial statusdoesn'tnecessarilymean he can'tbe a good husbandand can't beresponsible likemost ladies wantin their men,in a scenariowhere you meeta man, end upliking him andhe confidentlytells you hehas no moneyjudgement uponthis manstarts almostimmediately,"he's a poor man" "ican't marry apoor/trying man" as if you yourselves all came from rich family ibeg, As if being arich man will buy true love or keep themarriage sacredand holy, ladies so try andbe nice, i love allpeople rich men ortrying men, weare all peoplewith a humansoul! Thanks

To all theNigerian ladies outthere, the factthat he's notrich and hasnothing doing to show for his hardwork doesnot make himany less of aman withoutany iota ofdiligencewhatsoever, ibelieve so manynigerian ladiesor particularlythe african oneplaces too muchemphasis onwhether aman is rich or not.There are someself-proclaimedrich men andsometimes youhave to wonderif this "richman" has been smokingthe biggest bluntof them all,because hisactions andmanner of approach speakotherwise, andthen there aresome menwho aren'trich and youhave to wonderwhether he'slying to savemoney or justashamed of his wealth.Nigerian ladiesand womenwhat i'm tryingto say is peoplechange, as thesaying goes theonly thingconstant in thislife is change.People change allthe time, justbecause he'shad not sopleasant financial statusdoesn'tnecessarilymean he can'tbe a good husbandand can't beresponsible likemost ladies wantin their men,in a scenariowhere you meeta man, end upliking him andhe confidentlytells you hehas no moneyjudgement uponthis manstarts almostimmediately,"he's a poor man" "ican't marry apoor/trying man" as if you yourselves all came from rich family ibeg, As if being arich man will buy true love or keep themarriage sacredand holy, ladies so try andbe nice, i love allpeople rich men ortrying men, weare all peoplewith a humansoul! Thanks

To all theNigerian ladies outthere, the factthat he's notrich and hasnothing doing to show for his hardwork doesnot make himany less of aman withoutany iota ofdiligencewhatsoever, ibelieve so manynigerian ladiesor particularlythe african oneplaces too muchemphasis onwhether aman is rich or not.There are someself-proclaimedrich men andsometimes youhave to wonderif this "richman" has been smokingthe biggest bluntof them all,because hisactions andmanner of approach speakotherwise, andthen there aresome menwho aren'trich and youhave to wonderwhether he'slying to savemoney or justashamed of his wealth.Nigerian ladiesand womenwhat i'm tryingto say is peoplechange, as thesaying goes theonly thingconstant in thislife is change.People change allthe time, justbecause he'shad not sopleasant financial statusdoesn'tnecessarilymean he can'tbe a good husbandand can't beresponsible likemost ladies wantin their men,in a scenariowhere you meeta man, end upliking him andhe confidentlytells you hehas no moneyjudgement uponthis manstarts almostimmediately,"he's a poor man" "ican't marry apoor/trying man" as if you yourselves all came from rich family ibeg, As if being arich man will buy true love or keep themarriage sacredand holy, ladies so try andbe nice, i love allpeople rich men ortrying men, weare all peoplewith a humansoul! Thanks

Has it ever occurred to you that this "non-virgin" may have been molested or r&aped against her own will? Has it ever occurred to you that she may have done it for the first time, naive as she was only to realize she made a mistake and never indulged in such an act again, only to be castigated by her society because she's not a virgin? Should she go and hide her face because she's not holy?

Now we're on the same page. Since you agreed that she has done it somehow, then that means at one point of her life, she played it dirty. Now that's lack of morals and self-worth but if you include räpe to the list then that joins hymen tear on the infinitesimal measure.

Now we're on the same page. Since you agreed that she has done it somehow, then that means at one point of her life, she played it dirty. Now that's lack of morals and self-worth but if you include räpe to the list then that joins hymen tear on the infinitesimal measure.

Whichever way you put it the fact still remains that non of us are perfect, virgin or no virgin. Like i said in my post people change, no one should be castigated because of our past, no matter how small or big!

To all theNigerian ladies outthere, the factthat he's notrich and hasnothing doing to show for his hardwork doesnot make himany less of aman withoutany iota ofdiligencewhatsoever, ibelieve so manynigerian ladiesor particularlythe african oneplaces too muchemphasis onwhether aman is rich or not.There are someself-proclaimedrich men andsometimes youhave to wonderif this "richman" has been smokingthe biggest bluntof them all,because hisactions andmanner of approach speakotherwise, andthen there aresome menwho aren'trich and youhave to wonderwhether he'slying to savemoney or justashamed of his wealth.Nigerian ladiesand womenwhat i'm tryingto say is peoplechange, as thesaying goes theonly thingconstant in thislife is change.People change allthe time, justbecause he'shad not sopleasant financial statusdoesn'tnecessarilymean he can'tbe a good husbandand can't beresponsible likemost ladies wantin their men,in a scenariowhere you meeta man, end upliking him andhe confidentlytells you hehas no moneyjudgement uponthis manstarts almostimmediately,"he's a poor man" "ican't marry apoor/trying man" as if you yourselves all came from rich family ibeg, As if being arich man will buy true love or keep themarriage sacredand holy, ladies so try andbe nice, i love allpeople rich men ortrying men, weare all peoplewith a humansoul! Thanks

Whichever way you put it the fact still remains that non of us are perfect, virgin or no virgin. Like i said in my post people change, no one should be castigated because of our past, no matter how small or big!

That's right, people change and we shouldn't be castigated because of our past. Also know that, the enormous cases of once a virgin now dis-virgined can majorly be ascribed to divers sexüal rumble. Now that's lack of morals and self-worth.

That's right, people change and we shouldn't be castigated because of our past. Also know that, the enormous cases of once a virgin now dis-virgined can majorly be ascribed to divers sexüal rumble. Now that's lack of morals and self-worth.

"Can majorly be ascribed to diverse sexual rumble" No documents or statistics to back this statement up or you're just jumping to conclusions to prove a point?

No dear, the quoted is indeed perceptible. Nothing has majorly torn a hymen than a diçk.

No one is arguing against that, if you read and comprehended the topic at hand you would have realised i said this does not equate to the fact that she has no morals or self-worth. Just because she indulged in the act does not make her loose any value whatsoever!

Men will (most of the time)prefer to marry virgins for various obvious reasons which I don't have the time list out.

But In this sexually active society, being a truevirgin is a meaningless condition, becausemen love sex. AIDs and dying has notslowed people down one second.Marriage is an obsolete arrangementbecause women are more self-sufficentnow, so who cares if she is a virgin.Unfortunately in the Black community,Black girls have sex so early that they areconsidered virgins if they have less thantwo children.

No one is arguing against that, if you read and comprehended the topic at hand you would have realised i said this does not equate to the fact that she has no morals or self-worth. Just because she indulged in the act does not make her loose any value whatsoever!

Oh well she lost the pride of being a virgin. That's value young woman, that's self-worth! Stop defending what's unethical. You can't tell if a lady had sëx just once and be aware that once open can always be open because it comes with a desire. Limit your defense to räpe and hymen tear then i got no point against you.

Oh well she lost the pride of being a virgin. That's value young woman, that's self-worth! Stop defending what's unethical. You can't tell if a lady had sëx just once and be aware that once open can always be open because it comes with a desire. Limit your defense to räpe and hymen tear then i got no point against you.

Pride in being a virgin? When certain women are even stigmatized for being virgins! The world in which we live in doesn't value anything moral anymore including virgins, even the men who want to marry so called virgins would be the first dis-virgin her without any form of commitment whatsoever if given the chance.

401kk: Men will (most of the time)prefer to marry virgins for various obvious reasons which I don't have the time list out.

But In this sexually active society, being a truevirgin is a meaningless condition, becausemen love sex. AIDs and dying has notslowed people down one second.Marriage is an obsolete arrangementbecause women are more self-sufficentnow, so who cares if she is a virgin.Unfortunately in the Black community,Black girls have sex so early that they areconsidered virgins if they have less thantwo children.

@ OP:Soceity is always judgemental, whether we lke it or not, we shall always be judged according to the moral codes and norms of the culture we belong - sometimes unfairly as often in the case of female virginity.Just like a person who looses an arm or leg would become less attractive, so would a woman (to some extent) who has lost her virginity become less attractive for marriage - whether its her/their fault or not. So if you've lost yours and are regretting it, just learn to live with it because its like crying over spilled milk - no doubt ppl would continue to judge & value you according to how they've be programmed by the values of their culture. In short, life is sometimes cruel - men too have been given their own cross to carry.

Pride in being a virgin? When certain women are even stigmatized for being virgins! The world in which we live in doesn't value anything moral anymore including virgins, even the men who want to marry so called virgins would be the first dis-virgin her without any form of commitment whatsoever if given the chance.

That's why i said your thread is a consolation to non-virgins. You wrote it based on the decadence in the society. In as much as i'm not all out in search of virgins, the few around got massive pride and to be adored by logical minds.

KateSpade: if you aren't a virgin, you are a loose woman. its a fact. no man wants to marry a trollop.

a woman's virginity is her special gift. it holds together all her morals and dignity.

a lady's virginity still remain a thing of pride and dignity in any society and we remain so regardless of time and civilization. Those who are not will definitely get at ladies like them who still remain virgins since the know it's value and it shouldn't be surprising that they get pent up to hear of any lady being a virgin. Someone who once had an enviable treasure and loses it will not be comfortable with the knowledge that there still exist around him someone who still possesses it.

That's why i said your thread is a consolation to non-virgins. You wrote it based on the decadence in the society. In as much as i'm not all out in search of virgins, the few around got massive pride and to be adored by logical minds.

And i respect your view, virgins are a pride to any society they find themselves in, they exhibit self-control and a strong mind and should be applauded. No qualms!