Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Sorry- just had to reference Stephen Colbert sometime in this blog!
God has been asking me to write lately, but I don't feel like I can express what he wants so here I go anyway. The past few weeks I have been challenged, stretched, and rewarded as a mom. (By the way it still feels weird to call myself a mom and at times I don't feel I have "earned" the title in my 9 weeks of parenting!) I am reading an amazing book with an amazing group of women called The Gifts of Imperfection. In this book Ms. Brown's simple words, "we can't give our children something we don't have" really caught me. A few short months ago I would not have been able to give my (foster) son courage, security, self worth, or even acceptance of self, all of which are things he TRULY needs! I can now see God using me to pour these things into his life. A few weeks ago A attended Royal Family Kids Camp, a week long summer camp for kids in the foster system. On the morning we drove to the church, he begged, pleaded, and even cried to not make him go, to not send him away! Even though we had done lots of prep about camp, he was TERRIFIED! I was able to get him on the bus and when he returned from camp his first words were "thanks for making me be brave and go!" What a success! During our home visits and GAL visits this month we were told that A was doing great, was demonstrating a lot less anxiety, and that we were doing a great job parenting and being patient and realistic in our expectations. I don't say these things to brag on Justin and myself, but to say that if the two of us broken and definitely imperfect parents can do this- so can you! I hear all the time from people "I could never do what you do", "that must be so hard", or "I'm glad there are people like you." I truly cannot accept that it is God's will that there are 143 million orphans in our world right now. So many times I question "Is God not calling enough people?", "are we not listening to God's call to care for these children and their families?" I don't know the answer and I understand that not everyone will choose this life. I share our story because I believe that we would not have chosen this path if others (Brandy and TJ) had not shared their stories and their lives with us.