I came in 2nd in the poetry slam last night, due in part to the poem below. The prize money ($75) almost exactly covers my recent sushi bill. Coincidence? I think not...

Each dayevery 24 hour cycleeach complete rotation of this little blue-green rockroughly 155,000 people die.That's a little less than 6500 every hourand about 108 per minute.Now, I'm not going to say that this poem is going to kill 324 people,but statiscally speaking, that's how it looks.But you good people, you needn't worrybecause you are not among that 324it's not your time-wait your fucking turn.Because those 324 have waited their turnSome of those 324 are grandmotherswho are pretty sure they know where they are going,and some are infants, who don't even know where they are,but they have all stood in lineand reached that precipice-and then they fall inor they were pushedor, worse yet, they jump.

Some people are certainthat if you are standing in the right linethe other side is the greatest amusement park ride everyou hand your ticket to St. Peter and then over the edge and straight down,pull up doing 7 Gsthen up over the top, weightlessinto a triple corkscrewand it's cool, 'cuz you don't lose your lunch...But if you are standing in the wrong lineit's just straight down-for eternity.

Personally, I plan to stay in line for as long as possible-hell, I'm letting people cut in front of me!But I don't think it really matters what line you're in.If you're in the line for heaven, or the one for hellor the one that lights incense and meditatesor the one that pours milk on Ganeshor the one with the special underwear-even if you think you get to stand in line over and over-what matters is what you do while you're waiting.Did you make use of the time, or were you just waiting for the ride to start?Were you one of those fuckers who pushed people?Or were you a coward who jumped?

And if you are one of those who believesthat rules are rulesthat a single try is enough that you only get to stand in line once,just let me leave you with this old saying,this classic aphorism;"If at first you don't succeed,skydiving isn't for you."