Baby sleeps …after sex?

Rob Ford didn’t admit to anything else yesterday. The Iron Sheik however did challenge him to a wrestling match and promised to f-ck him up. So, there’s that. It wasn’t totally a bust for Canadian pride on Wednesday though. When Rob Ford doesn’t deliver, Justin Bieber will.

A video has surfaced on YouTube. It appears to have been filmed by a girl who has presumably just had sex with him. While JB seems exhausted by all the sex, she can’t contain her excitement. After all, we’re supposed to believe that she had Bieber inside of her. And how could anyone fall asleep after that?

This apparently happened in Brazil. According to some reports, her name is Tati Neves. She may or may not be a prostitute and she may or may not be transgender. You can see more photos of her here. Tati seems really proud of herself. Well, that’s where the expression “star f-cker” came from, right? You know me. I’m the first to blame this kind of sh-t on generation. But if cameras were more accessible, and smaller, back in the day, like when the Rolling Stones were lifting off, we would have seen constant post-coital photographic evidence of Mick Jagger etc too. The internet and social media did not invent boasting. Boasting is a very natural human compulsion. Technology has just made it easier.

Justin Bieber is a superstar. His life right now is sex, drugs, and rocknroll. He’s not the first and he won’t be the last. I recently heard a story about a very minor musician who was sucked off in the backseat of an SUV while his bodyguard was serviced by another girl in the front seat. They want it in as many different ways as they can get it. When you’re that famous, and it’s so available, they have to keep pushing the excitement. Ask George Clooney.

So I guess that’s why JB is trying it in so many combinations and positions. One night it might be a family double shot. One night it might be with a sex worker. He gets off on it because he can. I didn’t understand it last week but I realise now that it has everything to do with power. Justin Bieber doesn’t have to pay for it. He pays for it because it’s another way of exercising control. He pays for it to feel like he can own it. Her. Them. Everyone. And that’s what gets him hard. It makes sense that a scrawny punk who has to keep convincing himself he’s the Man King would need to buy that kind of superiority, right?

What’s great about this video then is that the little f-cker couldn’t keep up. On the one hand he’s fronting like he’s the player making it rain with all his money and influence. And on the other he’s like a toddler who just can’t stay awake anymore and passes out on the rug. How intimidating is a sleeping baby?