More Great Excuses for Calling in Sick

By Rosemary Haefner

It's 6 a.m. and you are about to throw the alarm clock out the
window. It's too cold out, you're tired, you had one glass of
wine too many last night, you've really got to clean your
house, and, most importantly, you haven't had some real bonding
time with your couch lately.

It's 6 a.m. and you are about to throw the
alarm clock out the window. It's too cold out, you're tired,
you had one glass of wine too many last night, you've really
got to clean your house, and, most importantly, you haven't had
some real bonding time with your couch lately.

"Just call in," you tell yourself. "They can get by one day
without me."

So, in your best sick voice, you leave a near-death sounding
message for your boss and throw in a cough just to make it
believable. Ferris Bueller has nothing on you!

The art of playing hooky
CareerBuilder.com recently took a look at employees who call
in sick with bogus excuses. Forty-three percent of workers said
they called in sick when they felt well at least once during
the last year.

The most popular motivator for missing work: good,
old-fashioned rest. Almost 23 percent of workers said they just
wanted to relax and catch up on sleep. Seventeen percent said
they just didn't feel like going in, 16 percent attributed it
to a doctor's appointment, and 9 percent said they had to catch
up on housework and run personal errands.

Three-day weekend or mid-week break?
Thirty-eight percent of workers said they viewed sick days as
equivalent to vacation days. The most popular day for calling
in sick when feeling well was Wednesday, with 27 percent of
workers getting over the mid-week hump by fabricating an
excuse. While extended weekend absences were also popular, with
26 percent of workers calling in sick on Monday and 14 percent
on Friday, those partaking may have put themselves at more risk
of scrutiny.

Your boss is no fool.
Sixty-three percent of hiring managers said they are more
suspicious of employees calling in sick on a Monday or Friday.
The survey also revealed that some hiring managers were less
tolerant of workers playing hooky, with almost one-fourth
stating they fired an employee for missing work without a
legitimate reason. While the definition of a sick day has
evolved, with more employers including mental health and
special circumstances in the description, workers should be
mindful of company policies and their responsibilities as an
employee.

"I was abducted by aliens..."
When asked to share the most unusual excuses workers gave for
missing work, hiring managers shared some of their favorite
examples:

"I'm too drunk to drive to work."

"I accidentally flushed my keys down the toilet."

"I had to help deliver a baby on my way to work." (Employee
was not in the medical profession.)

"I accidentally drove through the automatic garage door
before it opened."

"My boyfriend's snake got loose and I'm afraid to leave the
bedroom until he gets home."

"I'm too fat to get into my work pants."

"God didn't wake me." (Employee didn't believe in alarm
clocks and thought a higher power would wake her when she
was ready.)

"I cut my fingernails too short, they're bleeding and I
have to go to the doctor."

"The ghosts in my house kept me up all night."

"I forgot I was getting married today."

"My cow bit me."

"My son accidentally fell asleep next to wet cement in our
backyard. His foot fell in and we can't get it out."

"I was watching a guy fixing a septic pump, fell in the
hole and hurt myself."

"I was walking my dog and slipped on a toad in my driveway
and hurt my back."

"My house lock jammed, and I'm locked in."

Rosemary Haefner is the Vice President of Human
Resources for CareerBuilder.com. She is an expert in
recruitment trends and tactics, job seeker behavior,
workplace issues, employee attitudes and HR initiatives