The last few years have been a whirlwind for me, I have lost my grandfather who I loved dearly, My grandmother moved in with us, My little brother was born, I found Christ, I moved to a new town. Among so many other things. I don’t think there has been an era of my life with so much change. And with change comes responsibility. So much pressure has been put on me lately because 1) I’m the oldest child and 2) because i’m a teenager now that suddenly makes me able to do things I couldn’t before. These ideas scare me out of my mind. In a few days I’ll be going into my last year of middle school, and then after that i’ll be going to high school. And as of right now I have no idea where i’m going to go. I have to take care of my little brother because he has speech problems and I have to work with him once in a while. My mother is teaching me how to cook, and I have to care for my grandmother whose asthma is getting worse by the day, and what I really don’t like is that everyone in my school feels like it’s perfectly normal to talk about sex like it’s nothing. I’m scared about what the future will bring and really I just want everything to stay the same. I just want to stay the girl who likes Victorian history, sewing, pretty things, books and especially god. I don’t want any of my new responsibilities getting me blind sighted of what I really am. How can I stay true to myself even with all this new stuff swirling around my life? And especially how can I stay pure when my environment at school is so bad?

“And especially how can I stay pure when my environment at school is so bad?” Do. You have a purity ring? I don’t but I want to gwt one. So every time you look at your hand you are Reminded to stay pure. Love.

First off, I’m sorry you have some of the responsibilities that you have. You should not have to be taking care of your brother or grandmother to the extent that you do, however, I know that sometimes early responsibility is unavoidable. But what I want to say overall is that yes, it can be scary growing up, and growing up comes with more and more responsibility along with different responsibilities throughout your life, it is also so wonderful. You get to live and experience so many different things that you wouldn’t otherwise if you didn’t grow up. And that really is the beauty of it all. Things get rough, and you grow and learn and even when things get hard, you lean on God and your relationship with Him becomes more and more beautiful, same with the relationships within your life. So don’t hate growing up. It’s hard but also great. And as far as school goes. I don’t want to sound harsh, but you just need to get used to that kind of stuff now. We live in a world that does not follow Christ

Wow, it sounds like you’re going through a really stressful time. But I hope that I can help a little. There’s a show I love called Parks and Recreation, and there are two quotes about growing up in it that always seem to make me feel a lot better: “No one knows what they’re doing. They’re just faking it until they figure it out.” I’m eighteen, and there’s still so much I need to learn to do. But that’s okay. Just tell yourself this: everybody goes through this. Everybody needs to learn how to take care of themselves as they grow older. You’re still really young. Don’t feel like it’s all going to happen at once. You will learn how to handle these responsibilites gradually. Don’t be afraid to ask for guidance if you need it. You never have to face it alone.

“I don’t want to buy all this stupid boring adult stuff and become boring adults.” “Hey, listen to me. Yes, we’re gonna get a dish rack and shower curtains and a cutting board, but if you think for one second that I’m not also going to get that marshmallow shooter so I can shoot you in the face with marshmallows while you sleep, then you’re the dumbest woman I know.”

Point is, even as you grow older… you’ll still be you. You’ll have more responsibilites, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. It doesn’t mean you’ll stop being yourself. If you want to still be the girl you are now, then there is absolutely nothing stopping you from it. Yes, learn to handle your responsibilites, but don’t feel like you can’t chase your passions as well. Balance is key.