Best Bouncer

Big Dan Telle

Good bouncers never live up to their unfortunate occupational title. The key to good bouncing, then, is never having to bounce, save for when the occasional drunken reveler pulls his pants down and proceeds to light his pubic hair on fire. Okay, kick that guy out. Maybe. Fortunately, Big Dan Telle rarely has to consider such strong-arm tactics, owing in no small part to the fact that Big Dan lives up to his nickname. Granted, Off Broadway's off-the-beaten-path location and deep-fried live-music lineup doesn't attract the sort of hellions who like to start stuff, but equal credit is due the mustachioed Telle, whose easygoing demeanor provides a cue as to how patrons are expected to act upon entry. Such is the mark of a superior bouncer: If Off Broadway served something other than chips and nuts, Telle could just as well go by maitre d'.