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November 10, 2003

making my way

I've gone through a lot of stages in my life.

I lived at home for 18 years and depended on my mama and daddy to take care of me. That fact was a given. Then, I got a wild hair and moved out on my own. Man, what a surprise that was! If I didn't do my own laundry, it DIDN'T GET DONE! If I didn't cook my own supper, I HAD NOTHING TO EAT! Bejus! Life became serious all of a sudden.

Well, it wasn't THAT serious.

I had two room-mates at the time and we were more interested in partying 24-7 than doing laundry or eating supper. Rent was $33 per month, per person. We had plenty of dope to smoke and wimmen to hang out with. I played guitar on weekends and made more money doing that than I did flipping hamburgers the rest of the week. I learned that I could get laid by playing guitar and NOW, I had a place to take the wimmen to lay them. Life was good. I received a college degree.

I went on to the University of Georgia, to graduate school, where I lived a lot like I did back in Savannah. I never needed much money to have a good time. Hell, I don't need a lot of money to have a good time today. But I came out of there with a woman in tow, moved back to Savannah and tried to be an advertising copywriter while I wrote my first novel.

That woman and I fell out after a while. She left me to go home to mama. I was starving to death writing ad copy, so I picked up the guitar again. I was off to the rodeo for the next five years.

I lived in a one-bedroom duplex apartment and I don't believe that I've ever been happier in my life. I didn't care if the sun came up in the morning. I made enough money to cover my bills and had more pussy than most men ever dream about. I was a bar-house entertainer, and that's a life that will get in your blood if you do it long enough.

Then, I met Samantha'a mom. She started living with me, and she got pregnant.

I married her, knowing that I was making a mistake.

I ditched the bar life and took a straight job. My "career" took off, but my first wife spent that money as quickly as I could earn it. I actually played a few times on the side to earn some extra cash back then, but if Debbie came with me, her goddam bar tab was usually more than what I made that night. She always said, "I'm worth it."

No, she was not.

I finally got out of there and found myself sleeping on a bare mattress in a sleeping bag on the floor of a rooming house. I had an alarm clock, my guitars, some clothes and my truck. I actually enjoyed living there, because it reminded me of my college days. It was a six-bedroom house and everybody had a separate room. I made a deal with two of the wimmen that I would cook a big pot of something (beef stew, chili, spagetti, or something like that ) and feed everybody once every week if they would do my laundry. They agreed. They liked my cooking.

Life really wasn't bad there. I struck up an intimate relationship with one of the wimmen (I AM a charming rascal!) and after a while, we left there with another couple to find better living arrangements elsewhere. We moved to a nice three-bedroom house with a Jen-Aire range in the kitchen. Hot Damn! We were civilized! We were in high cotton.

Then, along came the Bloodless Cunt. She set me up, fluffed her attractive tail feathers and handed me her phone number on a small piece of paper at work one day. I didn't call her that night, so she called ME the next day to complain.

"Do you know what I gave you yesterday?" she asked.

"Yeah, I know what it is."

"If you're not going to DO ANYTHING with it, then give it back. I don't hand that out to just anybody!"

"I'll call you."

I called her that night and set up a date, fully intending to run her ass off by being my obnoxious self. But my plan didn't work the way I intended. Jennifer is SO GOOD at charming anyone she wants to charm. I
didn't know that at the time, so she worked her wiles on me with no problem. I ended up in her bed that night, and I was smitten.

All of a sudden, I had a problem. I was living with Dora and sharing HER bed, while Jennifer occupied all my thoughts. The weird part of the story is that JENNIFER KNEW about Dora, but Dora didn't know about Jennifer. I thought that I had to make a choice.

I did. I made the wrong one, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

That bloodless cunt set out like a shark to get what she wanted, and she got it. She ran through nine years of my life feeding on me, and when she was done, she dropped me like a hot rock. I never meant to hurt Dora when we broke up, but there was no way to help it. I tried to make the end as easy as possible and I still think about how badly I treated her today.

The BC didn't care. I know WHY now. She went out of her way to hurt ME when SHE ended our marriage. Scorched earth. That's all the cunt knows. And she never even thinks about what she does to people. In fact, I believe that she ENJOYS inflicting pain on people who trust her. She's just that bent.

I did not share a child with Dora. I was not IN LOVE with Dora. But I was in love with Jennifer and I gave her a child. I wish that I had not done that. If I could take it back, I would. I love Quinton with all my heart, but I wish I that had never sired him, not with THAT woman.

I can't miss what I never had. And I miss Quinton right now. Dora would never have treated me that way. Dora was a lady.

Jennifer is NOT, not matter how good she is at playing one for an audience.

Don't know the laws where you are, and while you may just be "speaking your mind" I hope she isn't taking copies of it to her lawyer. My ex tried to harass me via the courts over "strongly worded e-mail" I had sent to him. Get over it and move on. You're wasting precious energy and time with the kid hating her. I'm sure others do too, and everything that goes around eventually comes around, ya know?

You can call me and I promise I'm not a bloodless cunt but I do agree with Radtec, don't give her anything to use against you. Just open yourself up to falling in love again and sue her for custody and give Quinton and yourself the happiness you deserve. Just my 6th sense rumbling!

My mama's example was always sandspurs. She went over it about a thousand times, even giving annoying demonstrations out in the backyard. (Aren't my marigolds pretty? I planted marigold seeds and now I got marigolds. If I'd have planted sandspur seeds, I'd have sandspurs right there.) Geez! I thought it was so dumb - nobody would plant sandspurs, they're awful and they hurt like hell when you step on them barefoot. Nothing like being stuck in a patch of them with nobody to carry you out.