November 15, 2011

It's OK to Ask Hard Questions

I have a young man speaking for me tomorrow night instead ofmy weekly Bible study. I hesitate to give it up, but I feel compelled to givethis fellow a shot. He feels as if God is calling him to ministry and needs anopportunity to expand his audience outside of just youth Bible study groups inhis home. I still remember the opportunity afforded me by my pastor.Thankfully, my path as a Bible teacher and pastor has gone reasonably wellgiven that rocky start. It was not pleasant for me and I’m sure it wasdownright painful to my audience. Still they encouraged me to continue and I’mglad they did. They knew I was struggling to make my faith my own. Somethingmany of them had never done. Let me explain.

After the split of my parents at age nine, I began toquestion everything I had been taught. I began to ask the same kind ofquestions many kids do later in life when they go off to college. They are nolonger always surrounded by their parent’s culture of faith. They areintroduced to new ways of believing, or in some cases of not believing. Whensuddenly confronted with the need to defend their belief before people who donot share their faith, they often respond in one of two ways. They go on anoffensive assault to deliver a rousing judgmental sermon toward the hell bound unbelievers.This is usually more smoke than substance but defended as righteous indignation:a good Biblical excuse for losing your cool. The other response may be tofreeze in a defensive crouch and fail to respond at all. They realize that thefaith they have been carrying is not their faith at all. It was the faith oftheir parents and pastors and Sunday school teachers. These kids either getquickly swept up in the culture of the university or leave and go back homewhere their fragile faith will no longer be under an assault.

So as a kid of nine, without constant church or parentalinfluence, I started to question the validity of what I had been taught inchurch. I found much of it to be shallow and emotional. I was sorelydisappointed because I really wanted to believe in God. When I began to choosemy friends, who were all outside of my faith, I could not defend what I hadbeen taught. So I left my faith in my preteens. I became what has recently beentermed as a “leaver.” Leavers often ask their parents to explain why they believeand are met with shock and dismay, “Why can’t you just have faith, like we do.Where did we fail?”

Here’s a fact that comes from a former “leaver.” Most of these kids want to believe. Many of them return to church after wandering in the wilderness for a while. So many come to a happening church, with a popular youth group, and look for answers. When they arrive they find a bunch of kids who have not addressed the hard questions of faith, but instead have opted to numb themselves with activities to take their mind off their questions. Instead of addressing teens’ questions, most church youth groups focus on fun and food. The goal seems to be to create emotional attachment using loud music, silly skits, slapstick games -- and pizza. Thoseare all good and fun, but they are only ways of attracting a crowd. The force of sheer emotional experience will not equip teens to address the ideas they will encounter when they leave home and face the world on their own. Hard questions have to be addressed.

Here is what I found. While I tried the youth group thing, I never really was satisfied with playing pool and roasting hot dogs. I began to seek real answers to hard questions. I looked forpeople who were willing to try to give me a response instead of just turning me away. I had to go through a lot of “go ask the pastor” before I found some who would attempt an answer for themselves. Here in lies the solution to the problem of leavers. The reason why so many leave and never return is because they find too few of us who are “prepared to give an answer to everyone whoasks” (1 Pet. 3:15). They have to know it is ok to ask hard questions. Paul instructs us to “Test everything, hold on to the good” (1 Thess. 5:21). I am not nearly as discouraged by the number of teens who are leaving the faith, as I am the number of us adults who cannot challenge when they return. And they will return, I found life without faith in God to be a “dry and barren land.”So pray for the young man who is teaching for me tomorrow. He is making his faith his own. He will stumble. We all do. I don’t expect he will wow the crowd, but I am blessed to help him on his journey of faith.

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Comments

The reasons you cite for teens leaving and not having much interest in returning is exactly right. It is backed up by statistical research as well, as in Ken Ham (Answers in Genesis) and Todd Beamer's book "Already Gone" which discusses just this topic and results of a survey of 1000 18-25 year old young people who have left the church. The results are right in line with your own experience. They see through the superficial, and see no reason for putting on a face if it's not real. They want to be given answers, and as you have said, we should be ready to provide them. Meat more likely than milk.... Thanks for your insight Pastor Ken!