V-8 Tata Nano

Most Fun for Under $20,000

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There are great ideas, and then there are seemingly great ideas forged in the depths of an alternate, alcohol-fueled reality where putting large engines in anything with wheels is the best idea, ever. This is how V-8–powered bar stools happen.

Marxists rejoiced at the unveiling of the Tata Nano. It is a rear-engined, rear-wheel-drive, five-passenger vehicle that will be sold for $2500. Anything with rear-wheel drive, with the exception of perhaps a Chevrolet Chevette, makes gearheads think impure thoughts.

Being American, our machinations start and end with a big, nasty V-8. Of course there exists no greater temptation than the LS7, that enchanted aluminum and titanium dynamo spiriting forth the Corvette Z06. But let us, instead, lead you in building a viable V-8 Nano death, er, fun trap using the more ubiquitous LS4.

First, buy a $2500 Nano and have it shipped from India in a container shared with incense and remarkably low-quality open-end wrenches. Next, purchase a rear-ended 2005–08 Chevrolet Impala SS, Monte Carlo SS, or Pontiac Grand Prix GXP. You can also buy a 5.3-liter LS4 V-8 engine, transmission, wiring harness, and subframe separately; we found a complete powertrain with only 17,000 miles on eBay for $3750.

Order pizza and Chinese takeout, and pick up a pony keg. Drink half the pony keg, then drop the Nano’s powertrain and save it for your next Darwin Award entry (a Nano-powered skateboard?). Use a Sawzall to create an LS4-sized hole in the rear floorpan. Finish the pony keg, and fabricate a 10-point NHRA-legal roll cage with integral pickup points for the LS4’s subframe. Refer as necessary to the scale model you built with chopsticks and pizza boxes. The powertrain should bolt right in. Hold on to the empty pony keg—that’ll be reused as the gas tank.

Fire it up, barking like Tim Allen above the din of open headers. Sober up, and do a large burnout. Install a nitrous-oxide kit; the V-8 is now producing roughly 13 times the horsepower of a stock Nano. Do a bigger burnout. Use the remaining $9000 or so to purchase a life insurance policy, and enjoy your $20,000 worth of fun.