HELP FOR PARENTS WITH STRONG-WILLED, OUT-OF-CONTROL CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS

Education and Counseling for Individuals Affected by Oppositional Defiant Disorder and ADHD

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Thank you for your e-mail and encouragement...

Hello Mark,

Thank you for your e-mail and encouragement.

I am going through all the weekly sessions very carefully, reading everything, watching everything and implementing it as guided. We are now in week 2 and I would like only to say how I am getting on with the situations with the help of the programme.

Literally, I would say that I feel like learning how to play a piano. I have the notes in front of me, I have my teacher and now it is just up to me how I am going to perform. What I have figured out for myself is that:

-I need to know my notes very well, read again and again and try to get to the very inside of the 'music';

-I need to shape myself in a way which is going to help me to touch the keyboard with the right intensity-not too strong, not too quick, but just right, allowing me to live with the music and to feel it....

If I miss something, music sounds false. That is what happened one day when I forgot to praise my child for his good behaviour at school, but I did not forget to put restrictions on him because he did not obey and took a pound from my purse in front of me when I told him that I was not going to give him pocket money for that day for another reason. After school that day we had supper together (that happened rarely before) and he helped me cook and prepare table, but immediately afterwards decided to try his old tricks again. As I was sitting on the sofa he made a stick of a cardboard and started tapping it on my head saying 'Why are you like that? Stop listening to that people that telling you to behave in this way. I want you to get back to what you were...I do not want any changes...'I felt really upset but I did not show it. I calmly said that what he was doing was unacceptable and that we needed to sit and talk more about that. He continued for a while and then eventually we sat and talked again. I realise that my son was scared of the measures that I implemented. I explained that everything I did was to help him.

On the following day he got up and said to me 'I am normal again... 'but did not get any pocket money that morning because of his behaviour and did accept my decision without any problems. Then later on that day when I read and watched everything in the program again, I realised that I did not react to my son's good behaviour at school at all and I remembered how proud he was to show me his school report...

That day I got a phone call from my son's school to tell me how good had his behaviour been lately...I did not have anything else to do but I bought his favourite tart for dessert and we had a good evening including that he also helped with cooking and tidied his wardrobe. I did not forget to tell him that I loved him...

From the office of Mark Hutten, M.A. Online Parent Support, LLC Author of My Out-of-Control Teen The problem is that...

Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD)

Many families of defiant children live in a home that has become a battleground. In the beginning, the daily struggles can be expected. After all, we knew that problems would occur. Initially, stress can be so subtle that we lose sight of a war, which others do not realize is occurring. We honestly believe that we can work through the problems.

Outbursts, rages, and strife become a way of life (an emotionally unhealthy way of life). We set aside our own needs and focus on the needs of our children. But what does it cost us?Click here for the full article...

Parenting Rebellious Teens

One day you wake up and find that life has changed forever. Instead of greeting you with a hug, your little boy rolls his eyes when you say "good morning" and shouts, "You're ruining my life!" You may think you've stepped into the Twilight Zone, but you've actually been thrust into your son's teen years.

During adolescence, teens start to break away from parents and become "their own person." Some talk back, ignore rules and slack off at school. Others may sneak out or break curfew. Still others experiment with alcohol, tobacco or drugs. So how can you tell the difference between normal teen rebellion versus dangerous behavior? And what's the best way for a parent to respond?

The Strong-Willed Out-of-Control Teen

The standard disciplinary techniques that are recommended for “typical” teenagers do not take into account the many issues facing teens with serious behavioral problems. Disrespect, anger, violent rages, self-injury, running away from home, school failure, hanging-out with the wrong crowd, drug abuse, theft, and legal problems are just some of the behaviors that parents of defiant teens will have to learn to control.