You know sometimes I feel like my brain is bried. It's almost as if I am somehow sedated or on something that keeps me stifled and under control. It's like that stuff the give the kids with ADD. I just feel like I am consistently unable to start something and see it though to completion. It's everything I do just about. I get started, got at it for a while, and walk away from it. It's almost as if I am yet to find something I am passionate enough about ot pursue wholeheartedly.

I want to tell a story. My story. Yet I don't know how. I don't know wher to begin or what to write about. I guess the main purpose would be an effort to learn about myself. I need to figure some things out and figure out a way to get the thoughts in my head out in such a way that people will understand. My mind often gets hung up on the assumption that people don't understand me.

Very cool... I did a similar exercise back in August 2010 and it pushed me to make a choice and start a journey of self-development / self-actualization that I'm on now .. when I get home later tonight I will dig around for my old journal and take a picture of what I wrote.

Keep at it, you'll learn much about yourself through this form of reflective writing. Especially when you revisit it down the road.

That's really what I am hoping to accomplish with this project. I want to have something that I can do on a regular basis that I can hold on to and look back at in the future to keep track of my progress and potentially provide some inspiration for future projects.

I am hoping to use this time spent writing to learn some things about myself and also get back into the flow of being creative constantly. I will be going back to art school pretty soon so I need to really get the juices flowing somehow. I just haven't felt motivated when it comes to going to school for a year now.

Are you asking if I still write consistently? lol I wish I could tell you yes, but unfortunately I am very sporadic when I actually get around to it. It's almost as if I am compelled to write when I have an overwhelming amount on my mind that needs to be externalized so I don't sit there and ruminate.

I don't write on pen and paper so much as I use Evernote for keeping track of thoughts and ideas. That and I have a massive whiteboard wall in my house that I use to capture my thoughts as quickly and expressively as possible. I like being able scribble on the wall and just stare at it and let it crystallize for a few days while I finalize my mental impressions.

I know that feeling of being stifled that's talked about. Generally happens to me when I have obligations that I utterly dislike (hint: formal education systems), and I just don't feel like doing anything since I won't be able to finish it. It is kind of hard to explain, but I think it's the same thing.

I think you should just try things to find something you like.

P.S. - I don't think it's any use acting like it's a journal you found, since you've already told us it's you. We're still going to see your opinions on this entry individually because you're trying to make sense of things.

I too know that feeling. It is very familiar. I hate it so much but it is so hard to get rid of sometimes. On occasion though i am in the middle of such and event when suddenly i literally feel it drain out of my head. It is rare but it does happen.

I would say I am pretty open to trying things. I have tried a whole bunch of things over the last couple years that I have really enjoyed. The issue that I run in to is that I don't continue to like anything for long enough to truly master it. I become somewhat proficient in everything I try and move on to something else before truly mastering it. I feel the need to be a master of something besides rolling joints for friends and roommates.

What sort of things do you like? Personally, I think programming is great. It's good great scope to learn and grow, so it keeps you interested, and it let's you do tons of cool things that you can really be proud of. Just a suggestion if you're interested in any way

I feel this way often, but whenever I journal I hate the way I sound. There's so much negativity. On of my hugest pet peeves is complaining, sio I tend not to write. Feels like there's something awesome in me, but I'm in the dark without a flashlight or a match.

I've also had a lot of trouble following through with projects. Like you, I tend to start something big, work on it for a while and then lose interest. I have probably about a dozen half written novels and half-coded computer games.

However, I've also managed to stick through a lot of higher education including 2 masters degrees, and I'm currently on a PhD. I find that I keep myself going in several ways:

1: Have small, time limited goals that get you towards your wider goal. Stick to them.

2: Always focus on the immediate goals. Don't worry about the big picture until you've sorted out the little pictures.

3: Don't have a plan B. A plan B will become your default as soon as you hit problems with plan A. Having no back up plan forces you to focus, work hard and innovate.