14 Truths About Being an Introvert (That Mainly Introverts Will Understand)

The holiday season presents so many challenges to introverts. From the idea that one never feels more alone than in a highly connected crowd that doesn’t resonate … to the fact that each of us has at least a tiny introverted part that can feel overwhelmed or excluded by all the holiday parties and obligations … we will find more peace when we make peace with ourselves. This article has been making the rounds online, but I thought I’d post here, because I know so many clients and blog readers are self described introverts.

In her book “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking“, Susan Cain illustrates how today’s world has created an Extrovert culture; the ideal is to be sociable, loud, bold, and it is so because it resonates with how most of our interactions are nowadays. We are bold and loud all day on our social media; the corporate environment favors the “golden boy/girl”, who wins over investments with daring ideas and a charming personality.

But what about the other side of the spectrum? What about introverts? The people who choose a quiet evening at home instead of a large social gathering can obviously be equally capable, strong and successful. So, what does it mean to be an introvert? It’s not the stereotypical notion of the shut-in, that is for sure.

Below are 14 things about being an introvert that can help you understand what it means to be one (or you can experience a moment of recognition if you are, like the writer of this article, an introvert herself):

1. An introverted person can function better when working alone, than when working in a team. It’s not about being a “team player”, it’s about what can help them produce the best possible result. And working in a team, well…it’s distracting.

2. Being quiet does not mean “having nothing to say”. It means that one simply enjoys being quiet. As an introvert, I find some of my most satisfying moments when I am in a gathering and observe people talk, without saying something myself. Why don’t you speak? Because I am perfectly content absorbing the stimuli of my surroundings without producing any of my own.

3. Going out in a coffee shop with your book, work, or music, and enjoying that perfect little state between sociability, but without interaction, is very, very satisfying.

4. Introverts choose who they connect with very carefully. And when that connection has been made, it runs deep. Some people can be all depth, instead of breadth. And that is perfectly okay.

5. Rainy days at home are blessings. Period.

6. A trip alone to a foreign country or another city is not scary. It’s an adventure, and not having anyone meddling with your planning is pretty liberating. The lone wolf does survive (if you got my reference, you are awesome).

7. You can never comprehend how some people can spend the entirety of their day together, even fresh lovers in their honeymoon phase. Space is healthy. Silence is necessary.

8. Time alone means time for introspection. While many people avoid looking at their problems, letting them fester and become toxic for them, an introvert can take the time to listen to themselves and perhaps find solutions.

9. Being the observer in a group can actually be very beneficial. It gives one more chances of operating in a behind-the-scenes way.

10. Similarly, the observation of people can lead to better understanding them, which can make an introvert a very likeable person. Everyone wants an understanding confident who lets them speak out for a change, in a world where everyone has an opinion that can, unfortunately, be pushed on to you.

11. Spending less time socializing means coming up with so many more things to occupy your time! There is always a book to read, or a movie to watch, or a language to learn, or some volunteer work you can do, and so on. An introvert can see adventure in the most ordinary settings.

12. That moment when you finally come home after a large party is like the first breath of air in a long time, and a great relief.

13. It can be funny, interesting, and a little bit sad when people get surprised that you have so many interests and hobbies. “Oh my god, I had no idea you did so much!” I mean, it’s not like I sit and stare at my ceiling when I am not with people. But your surprise entertains me.

14. Socializing can be draining, but an introvert can love spending time with an extrovert. Opposites do attract, and one fulfills the other. There are things an introvert cannot do without an extrovert, and vice versa.

To sum up, being an introvert is a great thing. Being an extrovert is also a great thing. The greatness lies within the fact that we hopefully live in a world where people can just be themselves. Being clever and successful is not about learning to separate the more capable (read: sociable) ones from the less capable ones. It’s about fully utilizing every resource, and more often than not, an introvert might just be the ace up society’s sleeve.

Embrace introverts, whether it is the one hiding inside you or someone in your social circle. You won’t miss out.

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9 responses to this post.

Reblogged this on A Musing Word and commented:
I am an introvert who on occasion feels extroverted, and joyful. Getting tipsy makes me introverted but I don’t like the alcohol effects in my system these days.

Reblogged this on Tania Marie's Blog and commented:
For all you introverts out there like myself, perhaps you might find some or all of these truths to ring in for you, as I do.

As Laura, shares, if you find peace with yourself, introvert or extrovert, you’ll find peace in your life in any situation.

I no longer find it a challenge to be an introvert because I’ve embraced it fully and unconditionally, without apologizing for knowing myself and loving who that is. In fact a lot of people don’t believe I am an introvert, which I think happens when we own our truth and our power within that truth. That creates a presence people will recognize and feel, despite your being an introvert or extrovert.

As Eckhart Tolle shares, “You find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the deepest level.”

This INFJ (in the Meyers-Briggs interest inventory) totally gets it, and weirdly enough works in a field that is probably better for extraverts. In fact, I routinely tell my clients that our go-go-go, rah-rah-rah, I’ll sleep when I’m dead society is experiencing massive amounts of widespread depression because, in part, we refuse to allow or acknowledge the night cycle, the rest period, the dry spell, the need for sleep, etc etc etc.

Of course our societal depression probably also has roots in the dawning realization that we’re controlled by criminal psychopaths and they’re running the show… and will continue to do so until more of us WTFU.

This is perfect Laura!! Especially #3. I also feel drained around crowds. When I get home from work I need to meditate or just rest for 20 to 30 min. Then I’m great. I thought it was from energy vampires. Now I know I’m not the only person in the world that feels this. 🌞

Yes, from what I’ve heard and read, introvert extravert has more to do with how you recharge — alone or with a crowd. Not all introverts are antisocial, as some people assume. We just need our quiet time alone. I love going out for tea with a good book or eating in a restaurant alone. Those are some of my favorite things to do! 🙂

Of course, most people who connect with the Fae in any way are, by Nature, quite introverted. It helps with the connection process, which usually requires quiet, or at least quietude.