First phase of fishing season: Arrival of monster catalogs

Charles Walsh

Updated 11:27 pm, Saturday, March 30, 2013

They started arriving about a month, maybe two months back. At first, it was just a trickle; one a week. Then gradually the pace picked up; two per week, then three, then four. Before long, it was a regular cascade.

In the beginning, I didn't think much about it. But as the weeks passed, I realized that I was under attack.

If I was talking about a mountain stream, it would be posted with a big sign reading "BEWARE: STRONG CURRENT. YOU COULD BE SWEPT AWAY." But it is not white water I'm talking about, it's catalogs, specifically fishing catalogs.

I suppose because of the business I am in -- column-izing -- I am a target for more of these slick paper, full-color merchandise compilations than someone who's not in the business, but it's getting ridiculous. There were days when the mailman couldn't get the top of the mailbox shut for the glut of fishing catalogs. He'd just stuff them inside the storm door.

Don't get me wrong, perusing these vast arrays of fishing stuff that arrive in the waning days of winter is something I enjoy doing when it's too cold or snowy to get past the end of the driveway. After all, it may just be what I really need.

(Here I randomly open Bass Pro Shop's 2013 Premium Fishing Tackle Master Catalog and pick the first item my eyes fall on, a pair of this year's coolest Fish Fighting shoes in bright yellow with Velcro fasteners by Zeko, $79.99 and endorsed by the Strike King lure company to boot. Okay, is it me or do fish really care what shoes you wear, much less what color they are?)

Last year Cabela's sent me a hardbound "Master Catalog" that looked like something you'd display on the living room coffee table. The letter accompanying the book implied it was intended only for really big-time customers (who actually wore yellow fish fighting shoes?). I could not help but feel slightly privileged, like a casino gambler who gets tabbed as a "high roller" and has free drinks while blowing the rent money. The book was pretty much like all the other catalogs except it had complicated foldout pages that made trying to find a specific item like searching for a swivel in a pile of rusty fishhooks. I threw it out.

Right now, I'm gazing at the stack of 2013 catalogs as high as my right ear. They are from companies that include Bass Pro Shops, Cabela's, LL Bean, Orvis, Offshore Angler, Netcraft, Okuma, Terminal Tackle (at my age, I don't open that one), Mepps, Angler Outpost and J Crew (no tackle, just cool duds). But wait, that is not all that many companies. How could the stack be that high?

A quick browse through the pile answers that question. The marketing geniuses at the major companies (Bass Pro, Cabela's and LL Bean) have spun off a blizzard of smaller catalogs that have the same stuff as the master catalogs, but are aimed at specific angler groups. In the pile are catalogs specifically targeted at freshwater fishermen, bass fisherman, fly fishermen, surf fishermen, saltwater fishermen, deep sea fishermen and unclassified fishermen. Some companies send separate clothing-only catalogs.

One of my favorite things to do is check out the fabulous new names for lure colors. They get more creative every year. This year, for example, Bomber has a color called "electric chicken/flash," or there's the slightly scary "toxic mullet" (purple with green spots). Mirr-O-Lure has a line imprinted with fish skeleton patterns that may be intended for Halloween fish. My personal favorite is the Luhr-Jensen trolling plane in a color named Wonder Bread, with the classic red, yellow and blue balloons. Who knows, it might even build strong bodies 12 ways.