The most horrible, painful experience of my life.

OK. Before I begin, there are two things you should know. First, unlike a lot of stories here, this one is all too true (unfortunately; keep reading). Second, it’s not about my first time, since I am still a virgin (again, keep reading).

So here it goes. I was in my senior year of college, and still a virgin. (I was very shy, very gawky, and not very popular with girls.) This one girl in some of my classes, very pretty, seemed to take a shine to me. Why, I don’t know. (I’m obviously leaving out a lot of details here for space, you get the idea.) So to make a long story short(-er), she ended up coming on to me in my dorm room one night. First thing I thought was, “what the hell!”– I mean, this girl was gorgeous, and I wondered what the hell would interest her in me. Second thing was that I was incredibly nervous. I had had a girlfriend before, but we’d never gone all the way.

OK, so again to cut to the chase, we ended up both naked in my room– she basically seduced me into getting my clothes off (she took hers off first). So there we are, basically fooling around, kissing, etc.; at that point I realized that this girl wanted to have sex. I didn’t have any condoms at that point (I hadn’t expected this, by any way, shape, or means– believe me!)– to be truthful I doubt anyway that I would have been thinking straight at that point to consider using protection.

Anyhow. So we’re getting hot and heavy in bed, and at this point she basically wants me to have sex with her. Now here’s the kicker. As I said, I was a virgin, and painfully naive. So it got to the point where basically I didn’t quite know what to do next– i.e., how to actually do it. (Yes, I’d read the textbooks, but there’s obviously a big difference between the textbooks and the real thing.) Now at that point, I was so nervous I lost my erection. She saw what happened, and– to my utter horror– started laughing. I couldn’t believe it. I almost started to cry. At that point she got off of me, continued to laugh, put her clothes back on, and left the room. I didn’t know quite what to do. So I put my clothes on, sat in my room, and cried. Then I tried to put myself together in some kind of shape and got some of my friends (male) to talk to about it, who thank god were very sympathetic.

Again, to make a long story short– I found out much later, she had no real interest in me other than to screw around with my head (you can imagine how I had to deal with people’s gossiping about this, when they found out about it, after it happened– made things horribly worse). Since that experience, almost 10 years ago, I haven’t actually had “real” intercourse with a woman– I’ve been too emotionally scarred to get close enough with a woman to get to that point. (I’ve done practically everything else that you can do with a woman though, other than “real” intercourse.)

So why do I tell this story. There are four points I want everybody to know, consider them as the “morals” of my story:

1) If you are a woman reading this. Consider that, regardless of age, the guy that you are with may be a virgin, and may need you to guide him along (gently). If you don’t have the compassion and sensitivity to understand this, you don’t deserve to be with him in the first place. I am basically now permanently scarred due to my experience with this one stupid woman.

2) If you are a man reading this. Your virginity should be just as precious to you as a woman’s is to her. I am eternally grateful that I didn’t give mine away to that miserable piece of sht. When the right woman comes along, she will really deserve what I have to give her.

3) Both men and women reading this. There’s a lot more to sex than “true” intercourse. I still haven’t had “true” intercourse, yet I do feel I’ve known women better than some men who have had sex.

4) To any teenagers reading this: WAIT!!! Had I lost my virginity as a teenager, I might not have realized how precious it is. Also, don’t pay attention to society’s “rules” saying that there’s something wrong with you if you don’t have sex (or if you aren’t with someone, or aren’t married, etc.)… there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you, just the way you are.