To those who were sure Pauly D's blowout was simply too perfect to be the product of humankind: It seems you were onto something. The man with a plan and a project has confessed to being an other-worldly, spaceship-operating EXTRATERRESTRIAL, and all it took to extract the secret was a single blast from an obnoxious vuvuzela. Seriously, they should consider ordering those things in bulk at Guantanamo...

We've got exclusive coverage of men in black suits interrogating the "Jersey Shore" star as harshly as the law will allow in an MTV News special report below, and while Pauly's able to keep his cool through intense interview and twisted mind games, he cracks after the sound of a plastic novelty horn bellows through the room. "OK, I'm an alien--you got me!" he finally admits after deflecting questions about tanning in other galaxies and Deena's alleged ties to the planet Koo-Kah. Season 6 should certainly be interesting...