Living with Mental Health Issues, Stigma and Advocacy.

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I BROKE DOWN AGAIN

I didn’t handle my appointment with a new Primary Care Doctor well. In fact I left before it was over. Before she even came in I had my weight taken and height measured. I was also given a Depression and Anxiety Test. My weight is down and surprisingly so is my height! I am now under 5’6″. I used to be 5’7″. This kind of shocked me. My blood pressure was very low also.

When the Doctor came in she asked what I was there for. I told her I was looking for a new Primary Care Doctor. She asked why and for every reason I gave she responded that I “should talk to my Psychiatrist about that”. How would he know about my Gallbladder or my Kidneys? She didn’t understand why I had a Hematologist so I told her and she still didn’t understand. At this point I was getting frustrated and of course it was causing my speech to be off. I was having trouble talking. She again said that this would be an area that my Psychiatrist would cover. I told her about the swelling in my brain that no one followed up on but it didn’t matter.

She made excuses for the Emergency Room Staff that couldn’t find my Gallbladder. She said it wasn’t that they couldn’t “find it” it was that it wasn’t “visible to them” and I left before they could do a CT scan. I told her that I waited another 6 hours for someone to come and get me for the CT scan but no one did and that’s why I left. A nurse even commented on the fact that it wasn’t right to leave me there in pain and throwing up without doing anything for a total of 10 hours on a night that wasn’t even busy. No IV, no water, not an aspirin, nothing. But somehow I’m now being asked when I get my stents changed “When did you have your Gallbladder removed?”. I DIDN’T!! It’s something that Hospital put into my chart electronically that now follows me. Thanks for nothing.

Now I don’t want to go to any Doctors. I don’t want the stents keeping my Kidney functioning, I don’t want to take anymore medications, I don’t want anything to do with the Medical Community. Just leave me here to rot from the inside and slowly go insane until I know nothing and feel nothing.

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2 responses to “I BROKE DOWN AGAIN”

That sounds beyond frustrating!! I feel the same way about not wanting to have anything to do with the medical community. I spent last week getting jacked around by my current GP’s office, and today I’ve been obsessively reading reviews of local psychiatrists trying to decide where to make an appointment so I won’t have to drive two hours for appointments. But honestly, driving two hours feels easier in many ways because finding a decent doctor is downright impossible these days. I’m sorry you’re having a hard time. It’s exasperating for sure…

I find I actually do better when my Primary Care Doctor isn’t involved. I research and find my own specialists who don’t require a referral. Most of them don’t anymore. So I think I’m going to try not having a Primary Care Doctor. The one yesterday set me back quite a bit by saying I needed to talk to my Psychiatrist after almost every one of my concerns. They had some of my records and I wonder how many of their first time patients they give a Psychiatric test to right off the bat. No urine test, no bloodwork, but a Psyche test. lol