Freaky Fake Pussies

What it is: Perhaps the most anatomically incorrect sex toy ever created. A molded female foot in a high-heeled sandal, with a pussy on the sole of the shoe.

What it does: You've heard of guys jacking off inside a woman's shoe? This lets you jack off inside a
woman's foot...well, into her heel and ankle, as her toes gently crush your
testicles...

Who uses it: Shoe salesmen, foot fetishists, podiatrists.

Other uses: Pedicure model.

Sara Jane Hamilton Squirting Vagina

What it is: A fake pussy that squirts whatever
you put into it...Water? Eau de cologne? WD-40? We're not sure if the liquid
comes out of the vagina or pee-hole, so it's probably up to your interpretation
whether it's a peeing pussy or ejaculating pussy, but sometimes it's hard to tell in real life too.

What it does: Sprays you (or your unsuspecting
victim) with "pussy juice".

Who uses it: Guys who want a golden shower but
can't get their girlfriend to piss on them; or guys who want their
girlfriend to
ejaculate but can't get her off.

Other uses: Plant mister, squirt gun, use it
to dispense cream into your coffee.

Silicone Love Doll

What it is: A life-sized sex doll with "three super realistic entries, a skeleton articulated with stainless steel bones and specially designed stainless steel joints. The unique silicone blend will stretch up to 5 times it's normal state, and all stress areas are reinforced by KEVLAR! That's the same stuff used to make bulletproof vests for the police and military!"
It's industrial-strength, bullet-proof robo-pussy.

At $5890, this is the most expensive
fake pussy you
can get. Also comes with a douche bulb for "internal cleansing after use" and a
repair kit in case she busts a nail. Oh, also, she comes with a choice of heads.

*Real woman not included.

What it does: Lays there and stares blankly at
the ceiling while you fuck her, sort of like your ex-girlfriend.

Who uses it: Filthy rich necrophiliacs or
mannequin lovers. For $6,000 you could probably buy a real date....

Other uses: Put her in the passenger seat of
your car and you can use the carpool lane on the freeway.