Okay,
pretend I am a 6 year old child and my mommy went to jail and she's never coming back.
I need to learn how to make food for myself.
I'm looking for REALLY EASY TO MAKE FOOD. I'm looking for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack ideas.
What would you tell me?

Meat:
1. as a precocious 6-year-old(!), you can google pot roast recipes, in which case you get tasty meat AND veggies in one pot! Great for winter.
2. Place griddle on stove, turn burner to medium. Slather some bacon grease on the pan (just a film, not 1/2"). Place raw ground beef, pork, or lamb on pan once it's hot; flip once the bottom is done. At the same time, put a bunch of sliced onions in the pan and cook alongside the meat. Pour all the juices from the pan over some steamed cauliflower that you cook in an adjacent pan...add butter and/or olive oil.
3. Get a rotisserie chicken from the store; make a big salad of greens and peppers, avocados, and carrots, and put a bunch of the chicken on it. Make sure you use a good dressing...plain olive oil with balsamic vinegar always works, and Mark's new book has a ton of good dressings and sauces if you want to spend a little more time.

Make scrambles! Sautée together some onions, bell peppers, bacon, sausage, ham, or whatever else you like, and drop fried or poached eggs on top. Coconut oil makes the most perfect fried eggs!

My favorite go-to, super easy food is slow cooked pork. Cook it in your slow cooker for 8-10 hours, shred it up, and salt it. It makes amazing left overs too, so you can make a lot of it and take some for different meals.

The Shakshuka recipe Mark posted a little while back is amazing and goes really well with shredded chicken (slow cook chicken tenderloins, breasts, or thighs and add it to the sauce). I'd also recommend the shredded pork to go with this sauce.

Make marinara sauce using tomato paste (or real tomatoes if you're up for the task) and keep it on hand for quick, easy meals. Cook up some chicken breasts and put the sauce over that, or use some sausage or ground beef in the sauce and eat it over your favorite vegetables.

Take a bunch of good food, chop it up and scramble it. Eat it - you'll figure out over time how to vary the cooking times, but largely, it just won't matter. You'll end up with a great meal, full of flavours.

Scrambles and hashes.

Also, crock pot meals. Basically, bung everything into a counter-top crock pot cooker and let it go for a few hours. Done.

Start with easy stuff - for the purpose of this post, I'll assume you are clueless.

Chicken. To roast a chicken, buy a whole or cut up chicken. If you bought it frozen, let it defrost in the fridge overnight. Set your oven to 350F. Line a baking dish with aluminum foil. Clean your chicken inside and out with water and if there are giblets inside of it, take them out. If the giblets are in a bag, take them out of the bag and rinse them. Put the chicken in the lined baking dish. Put the giblets in the pan also. Salt and pepper to taste. Put in oven. Depending on the size of your chicken, it will take between 45 and 90 minutes to cook. To check, cut into the thigh joint where it meets the body - the juices should run clear. If the juices are pink, you need to cook it longer. Some people put butter under the skin of the breast portion to keep the breast meat moister, but breast meat is a bit dry, so don't feel bad if yours is. Some people also roast a chicken breast side down to keep the breast moist, but this will keep the skin from crisping.

Ground beef. Can be used almost endlessly. Break it up and brown it in a pan. Add chopped onions and peppers. In a pot, boil a cubed potato; water should be salted. When the potato is easily penetrated with a fork, drain it in a collander. Add your oil/fat of choice to the pan with the meat and veggies in it. Put the potato in and stir it around until the potato is nice an brown. If that doesn't look like enough food, crack a couple of eggs over it, lower the heat, cover the pan, and eat once whites set.

Ground beef. Form the ground beef into a patty. S&P to taste. In a hot pan or on a grill, put the patty. DO NOT press on the patty or it will become dry. When burger is brown/crisp, flip it over. You can press once if it's starting to curl or ball up. When cooked, top with just about anything you like. If you like your burgers pink inside, put the patties in the fridge after you've formed them and cook on high heat. If you like them cooked through, just put the patties straight from your hands into the pan or on the grill. You can cover them, but they might not get as charred as you like.

Almost any meat (including the maybe dry breast of that chicken). Chop the meat into bite-sized pieces. Chop up some veggies that you like: brocolli, onions, cauliflower, brussel sprouts, water chestnuts, carrots, squash, etc. In a pan, heat your oil/fat of choice. Put in the meat and brown it on all sides. Toss in the veggies and stir fry it all. If you like your veggies crunchy, this can be done on high heat and quickly. If you like your veggies softer, lower the heat and cover until veggies are to your liking. If you eat rice, follow the directions on the package, and put the meat and veggies over the rice. Note: if you use shrimp instead of meat, cook the veggies first as shrimp only needs a couple of minutes to cook.

Google: "how to boil an egg," "fritatta recipes," "perfect scrambled eggs." With those skills, you can feed yourself for a long time.

A whole salmon (head off and gutted). Line a large pan with foil (I use the bottom of my broiler pan). Put in about an inch of water. Put the salmon in belly down. Put some sliced lemon and salt on the salmon. Wrap the whole pan in foil. The more enclosed the pan, the moister will be your result. Put the whole thing in a 350F oven for 10 minutes per pound of fish. Take it out of the oven and let it sit covered for about 10-15 minutes.

Okay, that's beef, eggs, chicken, and fish. It's a start.

Have fun with it. Cooking is merely applying heat and spices to food because most of us don't find raw meat as tasty.

"Right is right, even if no one is doing it; wrong is wrong, even if everyone is doing it." - St. Augustine

Cooking isn't hard darling, you can make yourself some yummy food every day. First you just need to buy some real food like eggs, meat, vegetables, fruit, nuts and butter or cream.

For breakfast, just cut up some berries and put them in a bowl. Put some greek yoghurt on top. Sprinkle some flaked almonds and cinnamon on top of that and eat it all up with a spoon. Very good.

Making lunch will take a little bit longer because you probably want more than three ingredients.
Find a nice big bowl or a plate and put some salad greens on it. Then put a little bit of lots of different tasty things on top. You can use tomato, cucumber, carrot, cheese, nuts and olives. You will need to cut them into little pieces or grate them.
Your salad needs to have some meat on it too. You could use ham or tuna or cooked chicken from the deli.

It should also have a dressing. The easiest one is made from just olive oil and lemon juice, salt and pepper. You can drizzle these straight onto your salad or shake the ingredients together in a wee cup or jar first. If you want to take this salad to school, make it in a plastic container and put the dressing in another tiny container with a lid that will not leak. At lunch time, you can shake it up and pour it on your salad right before you eat it.

Great, you have made your first salad. You can do this every day, when you get bored just change some of the ingredients, there are many different ones to choose from. For example you could use sundried tomatoes instead of fresh, or feta instead of cheddar cheese. There could be herbs like basil and parsley in with the greens or in your dressing. See, cooking is easy and fun.

Now after school you might need a snack. You are going to learn to cook something delicious, it is called chocolate mug cake and I promise it is easy to make. You need a big mug that your stick blender will fit into.

Cut a banana in half, and cut it into chunks. Crack an egg and add that to your mug as well. Now add one tablespoon full of cocoa powder and 1 teaspoon of vanilla essence. Blend it all together until it is smooth. Now microwave for 30 seconds. Give it a little stir and microwave again for 30seconds. give it one more stir and one more burst in the microwave. It should be ready now, not gooey any more. You can eat it straight out of the cup, or tip it into a bowl, add some berries and cream and you have a really filling snack that you can eat at breakfast or suppertime as well.

Maybe you would rather have icecream in the summer time. That is easy too, if you are brave enough to use the food processor.
Peel your banana and put it in the bowl, add some frozen berries and some cream. Now turn on the processor and mix everything together until it is smooth like soft serve icecream. Scoop it into a bowl and eat it straight away before it melts.

You can make different flavours by using different fruit such as an orange instead of the berries. If you do this the banana should be frozen or it will just be mush, not icecream. You could even make the mush and pour it into moulds, add an iceblock stick and put them all the freezer, then you can have one every day.

Well done sweetheart, that is a lot of cooking for one day but you still have one more meal to make. I know you can do it.
All you need is veges, meat and a roasting dish.
You need to peel your veges and cut them into big chunks. You can choose onions, carrots, pumpkin, sweet potato. Maybe choose something different each day so that your meals are always different. Put them in the roasting dish in a layer. If you have more time you can add more interesting veges such as garlic, courgette, capsicum (peppers) as well.
Put your meat on top. You could use lamb chops, or pork chops, or chicken drumsticks.
Now something to make it tasty - salt, pepper, herbs like mint, rosemary, basil, coriander etc.
Then something to stop it drying out when you cook. Easiest is a tin of pineapple chunks or chopped tomatoes. Or you could use chicken stock.
Now put a cover on your roasting dish and put it in the oven. Cook at 150C for about an hour. Carefully lift the lid, if everything is cooked and yummy you have made your first dinner. If it's all too runny, cook it a bit longer with the lid off. The liquid will evaporate and the meat will go nice and brown.

Then you can eat it up. If there's some left over, that's great, you can eat it tomorrow. Sleep tight little one.