At the Last Debate, The Worst Ties We've Seen Yet

Well, at least they all decided to wear suits. The same suit, maybe? A rare act of solidarity. And with no sweater vests in sight, we've come to the end of the debate season. We've watched over it fervently, as one by one, the candidates have expressed themselves with style choices that showed us, essentially, that politicians own very few ties that are neither we-love-America Red or I'm-a-Republican-gosh-nabbit blue — unless you count those strange aberrations, like the time Jon Huntsman thought Ronald McDonald yellow might be appropriate or, from a non-candidate, John Boehner's strange obsession with green.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

And now, it seems, the four candidates still in the race have neither the inclination nor energy to seek out a tie that might actually set the record straight as to whether these are the four worst-dressed characters on television right now. Both Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum look like they bought their solid ties at Wal-Mart or Target, as if they spilled non-alcoholic punch on their rented neckwear and really wanted to match their date at prom. Ron Paul's cherry-red, printed distaster seems to go perfectly with his posture. Which is to say: Grandpa. And, as much as we can stand behind Mitt Romney's light blue-and-gold repp stipe moment, which looks more expensive (of course) than all of the other clothes on this stage, the truth is it's a bit too light for the white shirt that grounds it. Especially against the obnoxiously blazing backgrounds that have become CNN's halmark over the past few months.

More From Esquire

There's a reason that we, as Americans, have the term "power tie" — because the properly chosen one can connote the kind of authority and gravitas that we all should want in our leaders, whether we're talking CEOs, or presidents, or even fathers. These four men have failed that style challenge on all counts — time after time, in fact, at every televised event — and this last debate just underscores that. So, let's move on from the debates, roll up our sleeves, and get to the actual nomination. At least, when it comes to the act of rolling up one's sleeves — Romney has got the clear advantage.