2010

The profundity of the statement, “Fear is just a feeling,” may have already struck the rest of you, but the awareness came for me the day before yesterday. You see, I had this idea that I’d be able to stockpile my unemployment insurance, that I would be able to earn unemployment while I’m getting severance [...]

A friend of mine jokingly said once, “Oh I forgot, you’re like a shaman – you’re into signs and messages from the Universe.” Yep. That’s pretty true. But just because I receive signs doesn’t mean I always accept or believe them. Sometimes I can be very resistant and willful.By now you know I started a [...]

My mind is abuzz. This has been one of the most trying weeks of my life. On top of all the other things I’ve been dealing with, I’m also experiencing emotional upheaval as well as shock and loss because I found out today someone I went to high school with committed suicide.. . .All day [...]

“First things sucks and then they’re awesome,” could be the theme for me this week. I was in Chicago for my annual work conference and things just did. not. start. well. I checked into my hotel – kind of a dump compared to where they put us up last year – and looked around the [...]

Right now my mom and my sister are in the kitchen preparing our Thanksgiving feast while I’m lying flat on my back in the bedroom keeping my foot propped up. You see my gimp status means I cannot help because I still can’t stand for long periods of time. The best I can do is [...]

In Sanskrit there is a saying, “Hitaesanápresito’pavargah,” which translates as, “The requital of action is guided by the divine wish of welfare.” More simply it means everything that happens to us, whether we perceive it to be good or bad is ultimately for our own well-being. And also everything that happens to us is ultimately [...]

Today I’ve been thinking about giving in, not giving up, but giving in. My ankle? Still sprained. I’m still housebound, still unable to do simple things like grocery shopping, or clean my apartment or put my laundry away. The rabble-rouser in me is defiant and likes to pretend I can do those things anyway. Just [...]

I sprained my ankle pretty badly last week. (It’s kind of a tragic story involving falling down the stairs, taxi cabs who wouldn’t stop for me, and walking a mile on an injury.) So I’m sitting at home and I’m feeling bored and restless and cranky. The most exciting part of my day is when [...]

“The battle is over and I lost.” All day I’ve been thinking about what I want to write. There are so many things that occurred to me but in the kitchen just now I realized all I can do is be honest. While this blog is all about how I see a new world developing, [...]

I know this is kind of gross, so don’t say I didn’t warn you, but my body’s response to pretty much everything is to throw up. Too tired? Throw up! Fearful? Throw up! Anxious? Throw up! Overstimulated? Throw up! You get the picture. (Some of you have even been witness to this phenomenon.) Why am [...]