He ain't got laid in a month of sundaysCaught him once and he was sniffin' my undiesHe ain't too sharp, but he gets things doneAnd he drinks his beer like it's oxygenHe's my baby, don't mean maybeNever gonna let him go.

In spite of ourselves,We'll end up sittin' on a rainbowAgainst all odds, honey, we're the big door prizeAnd we're gonna spite our noses right off of our facesThere wont be nothin' but big ole heartsDancin' in our eyes.

She thinks all my jokes are cornyConvict movies make her hornyShe likes ketchup on her scrambled eggsSwears like a sailor when she's shavin' her legsTakes a lickin', keeps on a-tickin'Never gonna let her go.

He's got more balls than a big brass monkeyHe's a whacked out weirdo and a lovebug junkieHe's sly as a fox, and crazy as a loonWhen payday comes, and he's a-howlin' at the moonHe's my baby, sure don't mean a-maybeNever gonna let him go.