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Would YOU be an alcoholic if only you could make it to the meetings? Do YOU possess the ability to have a really good rant whilst obeying the basic rules of grammar? If the answer to these questions is YES, then feel free to share your deepest, innermost thoughts with your friends here at MyLaowai.com

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Let Us Leap The Bog Once Again

You might not know this, but the Irish are in many ways the spiritual cousins of the Chinese. No, really. Think about these few historical facts for a moment:

Item 1. The general population claims there is a famine caused by foreigners, even though in reality some practical joker merely hid the potatoes under the ground. Decades of hatred and resentment follow.

Item 2. The general population claims there is a famine caused by foreigners, and emigrates to the United States of Awesome. So, they can afford to emigrate but they have no money to go to a restaurant or the local chip shop.

Item 3. The most-famous-man-in-the-history-of-the-nation’s claim to fame is the fact that he rid the Land of all the snakes. There never have been any snakes in the Land, not even in the zoo.

Item 4. An elected Government proves unpopular with the losers (who, by definition, are in the minority). Civil war erupts.

How Chinese is that?

Of course, on the bright side, they brew a passable pint and the food is tasty and nutritious, and there’s nothing Chinese about any of that. Plus, some of the women are not bad looking, either. And on that happy note, let’s celebrate something else the Irish don’t have in common with the Chinese, shall we? Let’s all have a Vote.

Which of these two lovely lasses, in your opinion, pours the best pint?

justrecentlysaid

Aileen looks better, but unprotected sex doesn’t look advisable to me.
You missed an important point, Mylaowai. China and Ireland are both proverbial superpowers. Every second proverb, or slambook saying, or “wisdom” I’ve seen in my life allegedly stems from one of those two countries.

Chinese Netizensaid

Simple…neither are any good. They would not marry me and then succumb to pressures from my parents for them to bear a male heir so that said grandparents could dote on the Emperor 24-7, yet not teach the child any discipline or behavioral control.

Also, their bodies are too shapely with fine, round asses and unmistakable bosoms. They probably don’t squat on kerbs spitting sunflower seeds or chew on raw sugar cane or corncobs.

They would also probably have the undesirable traits of independent thinking, initiative, and would demand I do husbandly duties other than come home at 4am from the KTV/Sauna house reeking of bai jiu (something Ireland has not the technology to produce) with a floppy di di.