Greetings, everyone. This is your pilot Rubia Ryu the Royal speaking, and I graciously welcome you all to join me on a fantastic flight into the world of fan fiction.

Those who come by this part of the forums may recognize me as one of the more active members of the resident Sporking Theater, but I've come to write up a few short stories of my own in recent months. I've been searching through my works for what it means to be a fiction writer, and I figure it's a good idea to start where I'm comfortable; in this community.

Do note that I am very uncomfortable with writing about shipping, so I won't have any fanfics of the sort. That said, I am not against shipping in general and all canon pairings apply.

Now, I'm sure you're impatient to start this trip, so sit back and enjoy. I will be updating the featured presentations from time to time, so please keep checking back! For now, have some quick appetizers before I reveal my latest main course. These three below were entirely experimental one-shots, so please use discretion in your judgment.

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"Bittersweet Scents"Timeline: None in particular, probably within DD'sSpoilers: NoneA/N: This one was inspired by events within the Phoenix Wright dream thread, but those who haven't been checking it that often can enjoy it all the same.

Spoiler:

The fragrance of black coffee stirs a multitude of sentiments in those who try its deep, dark waters. Some seek comfort in its bitterness; others admire the intensity of its vigor; and even others simply need a little warmth to treat their otherwise cold and dreary lives.

Three men of very different backgrounds have gathered here at a certain café. One was a former prosecutor who took to a life of crime and was only recently released. Another is a prosecutor who was wrongly convicted and only recently released. The third was a former criminal… who just happened to be wrongly arrested and managed to outwit the law to escape any further arrests. Out of the three, one could say he is a genius at his trade.

And yet, this curly-haired man seems to be the most distressed. Business has been difficult; granted, it wasn’t exactly the most legitimate of businesses in the first place, but that’s beside the point. As great a thief he has been, this particular game has been a challenging trial of its own.

The white-haired man with a visor upon his face takes another sip of his cup, and then tosses a card face-down onto the table, where a small pile has been collected.

“One ten.”

The black-haired man whose hair is bundled up peers up from his hand and fires a fierce glare in his opponent’s direction. “I call your bluff.”

“Oh? And just what has convinced you that I am?”

He sneers. “I’ve faced quite a few lawyers in my days, Godot-dono, and I can tell by a hunter’s instinct when my prey has been cornered.”

Godot scoffs back, “Too bad you haven’t ever faced a lawyer like me.” He flips over the card, revealing a Ten of Spades. As his opponent cringes from his mistake, he smiles and replies as smoothly as ever, “Those seven years may have awakened you to a far different world, but in the end, a cup of coffee is still a cup of coffee wherever you go.”

“Grh!” Simon then snatches up the entire pile without another utterance.

Finally, their third player leaves his final pair of cards on the table. “T-two Jacks.” He’s shaking like a leaf in the wind.

Godot and Simon pass each other unamused glances. He may be an honest thief, but bluffing games were never his forte.

Just then, a commotion stirs outside their window. It seems a minor traffic accident has taken place, and two distinguished men are arguing with each other.

“This is exactly why you don’t carry pets on your head while you’re cycling, Wright!”

“Your dog blocked my view, Edgeworth! And I needed both hands to steer! Where else was I supposed to put her!?”

“Why don’t you have some sort of basket or case attached? How do you even go grocery shopping!?”

“I can carry those bags with one arm, thank you!”

“You just said you need both hands to steer, you dolt!”

“Yeah, ’cause I had a dog on my head!”

And throughout their heated argument, an adorable Pomeranian lounging upon Wright’s head looks back and forth between them with a happy pant. What a wild ride, indeed.

The three men inside the café return to their game, no questions asked. Even if one of those men is Simon’s superior and the other is basically the hero to them all, there’s no point questioning moments like this one. It is a fact of life that cute things can hurt.

And while everyone was distracted, Ron finally asks, “Since you two didn’t exactly call me out in time… does that mean I win?”

Simon and Godot stare at him in disbelief, but return to their cups in silent compliance.

It is a fact of life that cute things can hurt, after all.

"Journey to the East?"Timeline: AU, ties with the real world :pSpoilers: NoneA/N: I first published the following expanded as a multi-chapter story on my FF.net page, but I never got around to finishing it. To be honest, I initially meant for it to be a one-shot, short like this, and be done with it. Instead, I simply kept it in my drafts while I ran in circles trying to figure how to expand on something that didn't need to be expanded. Now, I finally get to share it as it was meant to be.

Spoiler:

This is the story of a young chief prosecutor who must travel eastward on a mission to retrieve the latest installment in a video game series and return to headquarters to distribute it to the West.

Though it was against his interests to leave office in the middle of his work schedule, his superiors have spoken. Thus, he boarded a plane intended for Japan. However, he runs into a few problems along the way.

First, the pilot of said plane was none other than his good-for-nothing childhood friend who did not have a flying license or any experience with a plane whatsoever.

Second, the plane followed a course that was not a direct flight to Japan, going west, but instead traveling there by heading the opposite direction.

And third, along their trip, they run into three strange caricatures: a monkey in a blue suit, a pig in purple robes, and a river ogre in a green coat.

The monkey was trapped under a small mountain on an island off the coast of Chile. The prosecutor took little notice of him, however, and decided it best to ignore him. Naturally, the monkey became upset and objected in his loudest voice, causing the mountain to shake and crumble before his might. The monkey then became frightened by his own power and ran off. The prosecutor somehow managed to drag him back and threw him aboard the plane.

The pig was found dining in an all-you-can-eat buffet in France and almost would have caused the place to go bankrupt had the prosecutor not stepped in to stop her. Of course, she was pretty stubborn about not leaving until she’s had her fill, so they had to get the monkey to drag her along.

The river ogre was found adrift by the shores of Madagascar. How in the world he ended up there, even he didn’t know. How in the world they managed to find him there was attributed to pure coincidence. At least it was simple to recruit him, since he was so eager to climb aboard.

And so, after a very, very long detour, our intrepid heroes finally arrived in Japan, home of the Turnabout Trials. The prosecutor stopped by the HQ in Tokyo, picked up a copy of the game, and returned aboard the plane. And by some miracle, the plane was set to fly directly home.

And that, my friends, was how The Great Ace Attorney had reached our shores.

"Chasing the Legends"Timeline: None in particular for the intro, DGS case 3 for the latterSpoilers: DGS1-3, but only minor details on the crime sceneA/N: This third one was simply created one day out of the blue as a sort of impromptu test. I had this headcanon for a while since I finished the third case of Dai Gyakuten Saiban, and I rolled with it.

Spoiler:

“What would make a good name for our boy?”

“Hmm… Well, my family’s gone through a long line of ‘Ryu’s over the years…”

“Oh, that sounds wonderful. I was thinking maybe Ryuichi would do?”

“Actually, I was thinking about changing it up a bit.”

“Oh… then to what?”

“How about Phoenix? Hey, it’s complementary, right?”

“That’s… not what I had in mind, but alright. Phoenix it is.”

And so it was that the boy named Phoenix Wright came into existence. However, not many people are actually aware of what really happened back then…

~ 100+ years in the past, Great London Court ~

A trial of great magnitude is currently in session. The defendant is a wealthy individual and owner of a popular amusement park. However, over the course of this trial, his reputation dove rather drastically, and according to the prosecution, it was well deserved.

However, the young defense attorney at the time – or rather, he wasn’t officially instated as one yet – was just beginning to test the waters of this world of law. He hadn’t a clue what his client’s nature was or if it was as bad as the prosecution had put it. All he could do at the time was believe in him all the same.

The discussion arrived upon the point of the crime scene in question, aboard an Omnibus built for a maximum capacity of 8 passengers. However, as this young lawyer hesitated to step aboard, he took a few steps around the carriage instead, and came upon a certain sign on its back.

“Phoenix Wright Omnibus”, it said.

Well, it certainly was a strange name to post on the back of a bus. It may have had nothing to do with the case on hand, but he was drawn to it by sheer curiosity.

“Susato-san, look.”

“Hm? It says, ‘Phoenix Wright Omnibus’. My, what a curious name.”

“It’s the kind that really sticks out to you, huh? I wonder who this ‘Phoenix Wright’ person is, and why anyone would want to name their kid that.”

“Well, I wouldn’t put it like that. I think it’s a nice name.”

“…Yeah, it’s not bad, but certainly not what you’d expect.”

And thus they continued their investigations around the scene, completely forgetting that name ever existed.

That is, until the next day when a certain incident with that bus resulted in its complete incineration. It would be a case that would not be solved until several months later.

In the meantime, the memory of that bus would forever be implanted in the young lawyer’s mind… along with that sign on the back.

And so it would be that a boy down along his ancestral lineage would be named after a bus.

~ End ~

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Final Note: I have indeed published a couple chapters in a separate story, which entailed an alternate reality side-story to the original game. I had initially planned for it to become a series, where I essentially retold the first game in a much darker and edgier style, but it was probably a project that was never meant to be. I've finished my spinoff case, and that will be all; I'm not going to continue it.

As of 8/16/2015:I've added another silly fic inspired by the dream thread. My only regret is not being able to include everything I had meant for it in the original design.

As of 10/30/2015:Said DGS fanfic will go on hold until I get my bearings back onto DGS. That said, another short crackfic maybe coming up some time next month. I'll keep the details to myself, though.

As of 10/1/2016:Whoops. I kept forgetting to update this initial post and now it's been a whole year. Added "Journey of A Hundred Steps", "I Want My Dog Back (By Miles Edgeworth)", and the first two chapters of "Turnabout Applebees". More of that one incoming. Also, one of these days, I hope to bring something to the scrapped concept of a Mafia-based AA game...

As of 10/25/2016:I've done it. I finally brought myself to publish a more serious work, and it's the one inspired by Yamazaki and Fuse's Underground Court. So far I only have the prologue finished, but I'll see how far I take it.

As of 3/15/2017:Well, I guess that AA6 Mafia AU fic will have to wait a bit longer while I figure out how to really make it work. I've at least updated the prologue so it sounds more relevant to AA. And I've shared the start of a new fanfic, one I've long been withholding because it's just so embarrassing for more reasons than one, but I've finally decided it shall be shared. Thanks to the dream thread as usual.

Thank you for stopping by, everyone! This has been Rubia Ryu the Royal, signing off.

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

Title: G*Dammit, Wright!Timeline: Some time around DDSpoilers: NoneA/N: I wrote this after midnight and let my mind wander. This is the result. It's not my best work *coughduhcough* but I enjoyed writing it all the same.

Spoiler:

There are two things in this world that Miles Edgeworth hates above all else. The first is crime; the act of violating the law for the sake of personal benefit at the expense of others. The second is pinning blame on the innocent for, again, personal benefit. It isn’t simply about bringing justice or following a moral obligation; nor is it about enforcing the law for the security of the public masses. It’s actually about something much more simple…

Getting back at Phoenix Wright, the one and only troublemaker that always escapes punishment for his sins, no matter how serious or petty.

No, he doesn’t actually hate the man with a personal vengeance (although sometimes, he does feel like he should). It’s just that one way or another, that man seems to get away with anything he so wishes, all because the Gods of Fate keep smiling upon him. And thus he continues his foolish song and dance to entertain them… at the expense of common sense.

Well, he’s had about enough with this hooligan. And so, once again, he does what he does to “fix” this problem… by confronting it, with plenty of rebuttals in his possession.

He finds Wright sitting on the floor by his plant… snoring and drooling against its leaves.

Well, whatever; nothing this man does surprises Edgeworth anymore. He steps right up to him and smacks him on the head with an objection bubble. It’s obviously the only thing that works.

“Ubbluh-buh?” Wright startles awake, glancing over his shoulder to meet his unexpected visitor. “Oh, Edgeworth. What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to confront you on important matters. Stand up already, so we can do this confrontation thing.”

“Aw, why do we have to? I was just having this amazing dream…”

“Don’t make me kick you.”

“Alright, alright.” So Wright finally stands up, stretching his arms and yawning, and rubs his head drowsily. “So, uh, how do we do this?”

“First, I’ll be the one asking the questions here. Second, you need to explain yourself.”

“About what?”

“You know what you did, Wright! Don’t feign ignorance!”

“I honestly have no idea what you’re saying right now… and it’s probably not because of what I was doing just earlier.”

“Well, I’ll need you to recall even further back to last night when I caught you on security camera at my house!”

“…What? You have security cameras in your own home?”

“It’s outside the door, I’ll have you know.”

“Ah, that explains it.”

“In any case, I still have the footage in there and can present it as evidence in trial if it comes to that. Before then, I’d like to listen to your explanation… if you even have one.”

“Now that’s just silly. Why would I have to break into your house when I could just call you?”

“As I said, I’m the one asking the questions, so answer mine first before giving yours!”

“Okay, fine. Let me just clear one thing up for you, Edgeworth… I don’t remember going to your house last night.”

And some lights flash or something and some background music comes up from somewhere. There’s even a green word in the top left corner of the screen that says “ARGUMENT”, and someone hits the next butt-

“Just shut up, narrator. We’ll take it from here.”

…And they both shut me up together. *sniff* I can never have fun with this…

Wright shakes his head and proceeds: “Look, I wouldn’t have a reason to raid your house. I’m no petty thief after your valuable tea sets, alright? And I have enough on my plate as it is. I have a daughter, two employees, two spirit mediums, even though they’re not actually under my supervision, and a plant to take care of. Well, Charley is easy enough, especially at night… er, ahem. The point is, your dog and I don’t get along. Don’t you remember from that one fanfic where you crashed into my bicycle?”

“First of all, Wright, that accident was YOUR fault! And second, leave Pess out of this! She wasn’t one of the victims in this case!”

“Victims? Of what?”

“Theft, of course. There were a number of items that went missing when I returned home that night… I’m sure you remember them, don’t you?”

“Nope.”

“Well then, allow me to spell it out for your dysfunctional brain. There was a kitchen knife, a box of kool-aid, my BED SHEETS, and finally, a bottle of pain reliever… which I received from Blackquill the day before. I know I kept it in the medicine cabinet because I put it there that night!”

“What the hell is with that list of unrelated items and why do you think I did it?”

“I just told you! I have camera footage of you breaking into my house!”

“Just because I may have ended up at your house somehow doesn’t mean I took any of it!”

“Oh? So, you’re taking that route, are you? Well then, allow me to present my rebuttal to your argument.” He wags his finger and points it in Wright’s face. “Your fingerprints were found scattered on my bed and on my kitchen counter, as well as in my medicinal cabinet in the bathroom!”

“W-what!? How did you find them there!?”

“I always keep a fingerprinting kit on me, so I don’t need the entire forensics department in my house. You’re fortunate I haven’t filed a lawsuit against you yet, you shameless scamp!”

“Who are you calling a ‘scamp’, old man!?”

“Old!? I’m the same age as you, you twit!”

“That doesn’t mean anything! I’m still young on the inside!”

“…Then I would have all the more reason to call you a scamp, wouldn’t I!?”

“…Oh, yeah.”

“Anyway, stop circumventing the issue and answer me! What were you doing with those things?”

“Okay, okay! You got me…” Wright sighs. “Trucy told me one of her knives broke during practice for a stunt involving balancing an elephant on one, so she told me to get another one for her.”

“What? So you took one of mine!?”

“I didn’t want to use one of ours. You know how much they cost us? Ten grand.”

“For kitchen knives!?”

“We got them as a set from an antique seller on eBay.”

“That’s such a rip-off it’s practically illegal.”

“Tell me about it! I later sued their butts and got the full refund, plus the set.”

“…So in the end you still got them for free!”

“Yeah, that day was great…”

“Ugh… Alright, fine. I’ll let the knife slide this time. But what was with the kool-aid?”

“Athena’s idea. She wanted to make something for Juniper that would remind her of Apollo, and apparently kool-aid was the first thing to pop in mind. I wouldn’t know, though. He never came off to me as being that sweet.” He slumps over, sighing. “It was also a while since I had any and I was thirsty, so I helped myself to a cup too.”

“…And?”

“And it was a little too sweet, so I reached for some salt to see if I could pull out any hint of savoriness to it.”

“W… Whyyy?”

“Maya did that once to me back then. I guess it kinda stuck.”

“Okay, I’m not asking any more about that. But I doubt you have some excuse to pull out from your rear about my bed sheets!”

“That was for Pearls, actually.”

“W-what? Pearl?”

“Maya sent her over just the other day to ask me if I could buy her a new set of bed sheets. I didn’t want to, but I didn’t want to send Pearl back empty-handed…”

“So you raided my house for them?” Edgeworth scowls, “What about your own? Surely, you didn’t get them from a ridiculous price off of someone on eBay!?”

“Nah, I wouldn’t pull that one on you again. But I didn’t want to use my or Trucy’s bed sheets! We’re still using them!”

“I was still using mine, Wright!”

“But you have another, don’t you?”

“Forget that! Don’t you!?”

“…Forgot to clean up laundry that weekend.”

“Grr…” But as much as Edgeworth wanted to punch him in the face, he held back. “…Just as a final check, what were you doing with those pain relievers?”

“They were for Apollo.”

“…Any context to it?”

“Nope.”

Edgeworth plants a hand on his face. He can’t take any more of this embarrassment of a testimony. While it’d be business as usual in the court or investigating on the scene, he’s here in Wright’s office, hearing this embarrassment from the man himself. And then in a brief moment of clarity, he spots a certain inconsistency out of it all.

“Objection!”

“…What now? You aren’t objecting for the sake of objecting again, are you?”

“Nice try, Wright, but I’ve seen through your cleverly woven tale of lies. There are two crucial contradictions in your testimony just now!”

“Huh? Two of them!?”

“When you brought up Maya’s request for new bed sheets, you said it was ‘just the other day’. Certainly, you didn’t mean yesterday, or you would have said so. And then, you said you couldn’t send Pearl back ‘empty-handed’.”

“Yeah…?”

“Therefore, you must have given her something suitable as a replacement then, most likely another bed sheet. However, you had broken into my house just last night! How did you manage to give her anything to carry back if you hadn’t even acquired my bed sheets in the first place!?”

“Argh!”

“Not to mention… the more obvious point that the Feys don’t sleep on beds in the first place! They have no use for bed sheets!”

“Double Argh!”

“Well, Wright? How do you explain THAT one!?”

“…Okay, Edgeworth. You win. I’ll come clean. The truth is…” And suddenly, Wright makes this wide grin on his face. “I was lying about all the stuff you mentioned! I have no idea why or how those things of yours went missing!”

“W-what!? You mean you were just wasting my time all along!?”

“Yep. I can’t believe I kept it going that far, actually! Wow, Edgeworth, you really believed me that much!?”

“…GOD. DAMMIT. WRIGHT!”

Edgeworth could hold it in no longer. He throws a fist in Wright’s face, only for the other lawyer to dodge it in the nick of time. His fist instead contacts Charley, who takes the blow rather well and simply bends back to fling the attack back from whence it came. Edgeworth stumbles backward from the backlash, but could still hold himself up.

But then… he happens to step on a conveniently placed bottle of pills lying on the floor. He slips and falls over, but is caught in time in Wright’s arms. The latter is grinning as he holds him for that brief moment. Edgeworth blushes, but it’s with awkward embarrassment.

Just then, someone snaps up a photo of the moment and squeals in delight. Then, Wright drops Edgeworth to the floor like a hot potato, even clapping his hands free of any “dust”. A young lady who was hiding somewhere here now hops out and throws out a V-for-victory sign.

“K… Kay!?”

“Thanks so much, ‘Mr. Wright’! This was the perfect opportunity for a shot!”

Suddenly, Wright grabs at his neck and yanks off his face… which turns out to be mask. Edgeworth gasps audibly at who it really is standing before him.

“L… LARRYYYYY!!”

Larry sticks a tongue out, rubbing his head playfully. “Hey, Edgey! What did you think of my acting skills? Pretty on-the-spot, huh?”

“YOOOOUUUU…” Edgeworth stands back up making a threatening look in his direction. “I swear to my father in heaven that I will beat your arse so hard you will be begging for a new life!”

“W-wait, Edgey! Let me explain! I only played along with this because Kay told me to!”

“I don’t care for your reasons! How in the world did you get a complete disguise of Wright!?”

“It wasn’t too hard. Kay knows this special effects artist, see…”

“And as for you, Kay…” Edgeworth turns to her with another glare. “What’s the big idea!? Why did you set up something so elaborate just to get some stupid and embarrassing photo of me!?”

“Anything is worth doing for you, Mr. Edgeworth!”

“And I’d do anything for my sweet li’l Kay!”

“Argh! Why am I stuck with people like you…? Where IS Wright right now?”

“Come on, Edgey! What would I be doing with YOUR bed sheets? Or your pain reliever?”

“B-but… then who!?”

“Well… I wasn’t exactly alone when I went in,” Kay adds.

“What?”

“Maya had to keep watch outside, but it seems she was caught by Mr. Wright. Then, he found me inside.”

“…So, in the end, Maya was the one who swiped my bed sheets and pain reliever? But what about Wright’s prints I found?”

“Well… he was trying to put stuff back, but then he said he was going to check with the pharmacy later to see if he could buy the same pain reliever, and so we all just left with stuff.”

“…Kay, you do realize what you and Maya have done is a crime punishable by law?”

“Relax, Mr. Edgeworth! It was all just a prank! You know I would never actually take things from you… well, aside from the kool-aid, but hey, I was thirsty. And I didn’t think you were actually interested in kool-aid!”

“That was a gift from from Franziska’s younger cousin. I didn’t want it, but I didn’t want to turn him down.”

“…Aw, that’s surprisingly sweet of you.”

“Yeah, Edgey. Even I’m getting a little touched.”

“…Speaking of which, Larry, you will be feeling a little ‘touched’ in the head by the time I’m through with you!”

“W-what? Dude! Assault is illegal! You should know!”

“It’s not if it isn’t reported! Come here!”

And so, Miles Edgeworth chases Larry and Kay out of the office in a rage that would last for the rest of that week. Whoever can know what will ensue from the chaos this time…?

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

I don't do self-sporkings. I'll be glad to recommend that last one to the Sporking Theater, though. It's so bad that I'm surprised I actually published it. In fact, I think that first one I published for the dream thread is suitable for a sporking as well.

Then again, I've seen so many badfics over these past two years that my level of "bad" may actually be among the "better"...

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

I write fanfiction only when the mood strikes me, so I can't say for sure when the next one is coming out. I assure you I'm not done with fanfics in general. Also, if I'm sporking something in the meantime, I won't be in the mood to write fanfics. It's too much crackiness to take at once.

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

I swear, it's come around to the point that I'm basically writing stuff because of the dream thread. To be fair, I've been waiting to do one on GS6 after the release of recent news.

Title: Journey of a Hundred StepsTimeline: GS6Spoilers: None, 'cause we haven't gotten much info to work withA/N: This is a very quick one-shot that I drafted up in a matter of minutes. Not much planning went into it, but I think it's good enough for its purposes. Thanks again to some random dream thought up by Bramimond for a little extra inspiration.

Spoiler:

Phoenix, wake up.

(What a soothing voice. It sounds really familiar…)

Wake up.

(Mia…? That sounds like her. It’s like she’s right beside me…)

It isn’t your time yet.

(It isn’t… what time yet? Wait, what happened to me?)

Be strong, Phoenix.

(I… It’s cold here. My body feels numb. I-is this…?)

Don’t give in.

(I’m trying… I’m trying to remember…)

“…Mr. Wright! Wake up!”

Phoenix starts awake, having felt repeated slaps to his face. His cheeks sure are sore.

Well, he was right about one thing. It’s freezing out here; a land bound by the white of snow. He finds himself lying on the icy ground, and the snow has sunk underneath his weight. As a matter of fact, he might just have gotten his coat wet. He gets up, grasping his aching head.

A young monk with his hair tied in a knot and a green magatama about his neck is standing by his side.

“Mr. Wright! Are you okay!?”

“Ugh… what… what happened? Bokuto?”

The boy helps him to his feet. Phoenix still feels a bit shaken, but at least his sight is returning to him. There’s even a crowd of onlookers gathered nearby.

“Yes, I’m here! Are you alright? You fainted all of a sudden.”

“I… fainted? From what?”

“I’m not sure… I was just introducing you to our town’s central temple. I guess I must have gotten too excited to pay attention to you. I’m truly sorry!” He takes a bow.

“I-it’s alright. I guess I’m just not used to the atmosphere of this place…”

“It could be… though you seemed to be fine just a moment ago.”

“Really? How long was I fainted?”

“Just a few minutes, thankfully. It’s not good to sleep here.”

“R-right. Well, I think I’m okay now. Where were we going before I passed out?”

“Ah, we were heading to the temple, Mr. Wright. See? It’s all the way up there!”

Phoenix follows where he points, and that was when it finally hit him. Sure, the temple itself looks quite impressive in its own regard, but when it comes to the route to there… there must be hundreds of steps to take. In fact, the stairs alone tower so high up, he can’t believe anyone could possibly get up there.

(I… I think I feel faint… again.)

At least this time, the boy and a few onlookers rush to catch him as he tips over once more.

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

Title: I Want My Dog BackTimeline: GS6-ishSpoilers: NopeA/N: Just a quick write-up to revive this thread. I literally came up with this parody of a well-known children's story on the fly just moments ago. This one may or may not be a sequel to Bittersweet Scents. I'll leave that judgment to you.

Spoiler:

I Want My Dog BackBy Chief Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth

My dog is gone.I want her back.

“Have you seen my dog?” he asks a short-haired girl in a kimono.“No, Mr. Edgeworth, I haven’t seen your dog,” she replies.“Okay. Thank you anyway.” And he walks away.

“Have you seen my dog?” he asks a young man in a red suit.“No, Chief Prosecutor, I haven’t seen any dogs around here,” he replies.“Okay. Thank you anyway.” And he walks away.

“Have you seen my dog?” he asks a man in blue trying to pull a little growling Pomeranian off his face.“No, why are you asking me? I haven’t seen a dog. I haven’t seen anything with this mutt on my face! I don’t want it on me. Edgeworth, help! Get it off!” he musters.“Okay. Thank you anyway.” And he walks away.

“Have you seen my dog?” he asks a young man sitting beneath a tree.“I’m sorry, but I have not seen any dogs pass by. I have been meditating beneath this tree all day,” he replies serenely.“Aren’t you the international prosecutor who appears in a game that’s yet to be released? What are you doing here already?”“Sorry, but that is confidential… On that thought, I would like to ask you why you seem to be pictured on the promotional poster for this game.”“…Sorry, but that’s confidential. Thank you anyway.” And he walks away.

“Have you seen my dog?” he asks the Chief of Detectives at the precinct.“No, Chief Prosecutor, sir! Should I be on the lookout for any dogs that pass by the precinct?” he asks.“Yes, that would be helpful… but I’d hope you’d be looking beyond your computer.”“Er, well… You see, sir, I have an important meeting to attend in this online conference…”“I know what a forum site looks like, Chief Detective, and this one seems to be on Korean operas.”“…Oops. S-sorry, sir! I’ll get a search for that dog stat!”“That’s more like it. Oh, and look forward to your salary assessment next month.” And he walks away.

He returns to his office, sipping solemnly from a cup of tea.“No one has seen Pess. What if I never see her again? My poor Pess… I miss her so much.”A certain detective who frequents this office appears.“Mr. Edgeworth, sir! I’ve got the papers for the latest case and… uh, is something wrong, sir?”“It’s my dog. She’s gone missing.”“Oh, no… What does she look like, sir? I’ll get on a search right away!”“That won’t be necessary, Detective. I’ve already requested a search… But if you happen to see her, she’s a Pomeranian, about a foot tall, pointed ears, quite fluffy…”In a burst of inspiration, he recalls something recent.“No, it couldn’t be…”“Huh? What is it, sir?”“I HAVE SEEN MY DOG! SHE WAS RIGHT THERE!”“Uh, where, sir?”And he runs out.

He drives straight to a certain law firm and barges in, pointing with a threatening finger.“WRIGHT! What are you doing with my dog!?”He finds the young man in red pulling on the dog still hanging on for dear life onto the man in blue.“Hang on, boss! I’m here!”A young lady in yellow rushes over with a broom and swings it at the man’s head. The dog avoids it in the nick of time, but the man doesn’t. He topples to the floor, out cold. The dog then bounds over to her dear owner, and he drops down to pick her up.“Goodness, Pess. Don’t go running off on your own.”He gives her a few gentle strokes, and she curls up in his arms.“I’m sorry I’ve left you alone at home. The maid called in sick, it seems…”“Sorry about that, Chief Prosecutor,” says the young man in red, “Mr. Wright just came in with her stuck on him and asked us to help.”“Well, I got her off at least!” says the young lady in yellow.“Yeah… and you knocked him out too.”“I-it was an accident! …I’ll apologize later when he wakes up.”“I should apologize as well for causing this trouble. Send Wright my thanks for keeping her company… Come along, Pess.”And he walks away with his dear doggie, who gives one last bright-eyed smile at the man in blue out cold on the floor.

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“Have you seen my dog?” he asks a man in blue trying to pull a little growling Pomeranian off his face.“No, why are you asking me? I haven’t seen a dog. I haven’t seen anything with this mutt on my face! I don’t want it on me. Edgeworth, help! Get it off!” he musters.“Okay. Thank you anyway.” And he walks away.

This. This makes the entire story. Edgey just leaving Wright to deal with a pissed off dog mauling his face. Brilliant

I've heard rumors… Bramimond, one of the eight legends, devoted himself entirely to the dark. All emotion, all memory… dissolved in a river of dark. That is how he received the power to best dragons

Title: Turnabout ApplebeesTimeline: post-SoJ?Spoilers: Only for AJ, but ya'll'd knowA/N: I seem to be on a role with crackfics these days. Thanks to D.A. McCoy @C-R for the idea and “plot thread” behind GS7.

Spoiler: Chapter 1

Some day at the WAA…

“Hey, Apollo! You wanna be my assistant again for my next show?”

“No thanks. Get Athena to do it.”

“She ran away before I could. Now you’re the only one left.”

“What about Mr. Wright?”

“He ran away too.”

“…This is HIS office.”

“Yeah, but he said he had business to attend to…”

“What business? If he was on a case, he would have just told us.”

“I dunno. He just said ‘business’.”

(…I hope he isn’t in the bathroom. I just cleaned it this morning.)

“Anyway! What’s wrong with helping a li’l girl with her troubles from time to time?”

“Unless those ‘troubles’ involve legal procedure, I don’t usually volunteer for community work…”

“But it does involve legal procedure!”

“Like what?”

“Like… signing contracts to rent the Penrose Theater for a few more months.”

“More? How long do you need to use it?”

“As long as possible, Apollo! The show must go on!”

“There should be some end to it so the audience can relax, though…”

“Aw, come on! Just come with me! We’re gonna be late for rehearsal at this rate!” Yoink.

“H-hey! I can walk on my own!”

The two rush to the theater as fast as public transport can take them and Trucy throws him right into the fray… as in, literally into a fray between bickering pigeons.

“WHY PIGEONS!?”

“We ran out of doves. The animal handler said we should cycle between different coops from show to show, but the latest recruits haven’t arrived yet for some reason. We’re still talking things out.”

“Okay, but why did you throw me into a cannon and launch me into a pigeon coop?”

“Silly Apollo. It’s the warm-up.”

“I didn’t ask for thiiiis!! …And I think I’m stuck now. Help.”

“Oops. Maybe the cannon was a bit too strong.”

“YA THINK!?”

~

Elsewhere at an Applebees, a man in blue is seated with a woman in a translucent cloak… and there’s a mariachi band playing in the back because mariachi is cool.

“Mr. Wright, you really didn’t have to invite me to dinner like this…”

“Don’t worry about it. I would have offered anyway.”

“Very well… but if I may ask…”

“Yes?”

“Why have we come to Applebees?”

“…It’s just something a little different.”

“Oh, I see.”

(Probably shouldn’t bring up those coupons they keep mailing me… Thinking about it, I didn’t sign up for their membership…) “Um, is something wrong with it?”

“Hmm… not in particular, but I have heard of some less than desirable rumors about this restaurant chain.”

“Overpriced bad food?”

“According to Yelp, yes, for the most part.”

“Nah, don’t worry about it. Compared to the amount I’m used to, this place is cheap… er, less expensive. Not necessarily cheap, per se…”

She chuckles. “Oh, it’s fine, Mr. Wright. I know what you mean.”

(…Mainly thanks to the coupon. If I didn’t have it, I probably would never come here.)

The two continue their very platonic conversation and make their orders. However, as the less-than-enthusiastic waiter – who clearly is busier on his phone than taking orders – waddles off back to the kitchen… tragedy strikes.

Or rather, a sudden desire to flee to the bathroom strikes. Phoenix hastily excuses himself and runs to the restrooms, now fully regretting he didn’t use the office one.

Incidentally, before he can use any of the stalls, he finds a drunken guy on the floor, clutching a bottle of wine in one hand.

“…Edgeworth? What are you doing here?”

The man in the magenta suit gurgles something incoherently, but Phoenix can barely make out something like “fangirls…”

Phoenix decides it’s best not to delve any further into it and does his business in the privacy of a stall. He has to step over his buddy as he reaches for the sink, and after washing his hands… he decides to splash some water on the guy’s face.

What ensues is Phoenix getting chased out the door and around the restaurant by an enraged prosecutor with an empty wine bottle. Miraculously, no one pays any attention.

It’s nearly half an hour before he finally loses the angry red bull and finds his way back to the table. However, when he arrives, he notices that Thalassa has not touched her plate.

“Are you alright? You aren’t eating.”

“Oh, it’s not like that. This is just the wrong order.”

“Wrong order?”

“I’ve told several waiters about it, actually, but it seems each time, they come with something different from what I ordered.”

“Wow. That’s awful.”

“I’d rather not admit it, but it’s true. The service of this restaurant needs much improvement.”

(Normally, I’d be upset too, but hey, at least I had coupons.)

Eventually, the right order comes along, and the (different) waiter apologizes for the delay. It seems they had some “chaos in the kitchen” ever since they started a breakfast menu.

“I see. Thank you.”

The waiter goes away and they’re back to doing dinner.

(…Maybe I could get them to bring me another serving. This one got cold.)

“Mr. Wright?”

“Yes?”

“Sorry to bother you, but where had you gone for the past half hour?”

“…I was trying to lose sight of a red bull.”

“A red bull? Oh, dear. Is there a ranch nearby?”

“No, no. It was a person. Bad day, I guess.”

“Oh… I hope it wasn’t too bad.”

“Probably not. He’ll get over it by tomorrow, I’m sure.”

Eventually, after Phoenix gets his hot plate and they’ve eaten their fill, he gladly offers to pay for the bill. But, when the bill arrives, he notices the price is higher than he expected it to be. He goes to the cashier to complain and ask if they applied the coupon.

Sadly, the coupon turned out to be expired just yesterday.

And so, without another word, Phoenix pays the full amount, and he and Thalassa take their leave peacefully. Once she’s gone, though, he heads back to the office.

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Title: Turnabout ApplebeesTimeline: post-SoJ?Spoilers: Only for AJ, but we haven't gotten there yet

Spoiler: Chapter 2

The next day in court (Let’s just say Phoenix managed to bribe the judge to come with his pretty-much-expired coupons and a bagel sandwich)…

“The court is now in session for the trial of Mr. Dubin Beets of Applebees.”

“The plaintiff’s defense is ready, Your Honor.”

“The defendant’s defense is ready, Your Honor.”

Phoenix gasps. The one who ended up taking the restaurant’s defense is none other than Apollo. How he didn’t notice that before he walked into court, he blames the cameraman. That ol’ prankster never gets the close-up right, crikey.

“Apollo!?”

“Yes, Mr. Wright?”

“What are you doing there? Do you even know what you’re getting yourself into!?”

“Um… I’m defending a place that asked me to defend them, aka my job?”

“No, Apollo, I don’t think you understand the implications of this case…”

“Being?”

“This is Applebees.”

“…No, this is court.”

“Apollo! If you even dare to win this one against me… you can say goodbye to your next month’s salary.”

“…Mr. Wright, no offense, but by law, you’re supposed to compensate your employees regardless of whether you win or lose a trial.”

“Apollo, no offense, but that law isn’t the subject of this trial. Besides, I have a certain client of mine who has something to say to the defendant.”

The judge nods, munching on his bagel sandwich. “If that’s to mean the plaintiff wishes to testify first, then please proceed.”

Apollo stares. “Why is the judge eating?”

“The judge is always eating. Don’t mind him.”

“Trucy!? When did you get in here!?”

“What? You think you can avoid your responsibilities by running away and taking a case? Nice try!”

Phoenix frowns. “…Apollo, did you really take this case because of that?”

“No!”

Trucy corrects him: “Yes.”

“…Maybe.”

Phoenix shakes his head. “Okay, I may have been joking earlier about your salary, but if you try to pull the wool over Trucy again, I’m going to take that salary evaluation seriously.”

They gasp together when they see the client step forth from the double doors. It’s the pretty songstress in a translucent cloak they met once before.

“Yippee! It’s Lamiroir! I love her songs!”

“Yeah, me too. I wonder if we’ll get to hear one… Wait.” He starts sweating. “Are you kidding me?”

“What?”

“SHE’S the plaintiff!? And here I thought Mr. Wright was just throwing a fuss about a bad meal!”

“It WAS a bad meal,” the other man replies. “One worthy of a lawsuit, in my opinion.”

“What kind of bad are we talking about…?”

“The worst.”

“You mean… did someone nearly get poisoned or something?”

“…You could say that.”

(How about saying it yourself!? You were there!)

The judge ignores everyone and continues: “Plaintiff, I’ve heard you have something to testify?”

“Yes, Your Honor. With Mr. Wright’s help yesterday, we filed a complaint to the restaurant owner, but it seems we didn’t get a response. I left it to him to decide if we should take this to court.”

“I see. Could you please tell us about your experience that day?”

“Certainly.”

*insert whooshing text*

“Mr. Wright and I stopped by the restaurant for a dinner last night. We were promptly escorted to our seats as we came in, but then we were greeted by an unenthusiastic waiter who seemed to have been listening to his phone. I’m not sure if he heard us clearly when he took our orders, but he looked as if he did. While we waited for our orders, Mr. Wright had to excuse himself. I continued waiting there patiently, and then another waiter arrived with a dish. However, it was not one either one of us ordered. This happened a total of three times, each with a different waiter. Eventually, after Mr. Wright returned, one of them arrived with the right items and apologized for the delay. We then helped ourselves and paid for the meal.”

The judge has finished his sandwich and wiping his mouth with a handkerchief. He then nods. “Hm, I see. That is a troubling experience.”

“Wait, Your Honor.”

“Yes, Mr. Justice?”

“I can understand how annoying it is to keep getting the wrong order, but in the end, someone apologized and you still paid for the meal, right? What’s the problem?”

Phoenix retorts, “The problem, Mr. Justice, is that despite the terrible service, the meal was charged the full price.”

“Ah, yes.” Thalassa adds, “I recall that Mr. Wright’s coupon was…”

He slams the desk, cutting her off. “The plaintiff’s defense asserts that we deserve compensation for this disservice to their customers! At least 10.38!”

“T-ten point thirty-eight million!?”

“No, Your Honor. Ten dollars and thirty-eight cents.”

“…That’s a surprisingly low amount of compensation.”

“We don’t ask for much, Your Honor.”

Apollo frowns. “…What the heck is that amount? It sounds like a discount from a coupon.”

Trucy shrugs. “Maybe. I noticed he snatched up some paper before he left yesterday.”

“…It expired, didn’t it?”

“That’s what I was thinking.”

(And now he’s asking for the money he paid because of his own carelessness…)

“In any case, Mr. Justice, you may proceed with your cross-examination.”

*more text whooshing*

“Ms. Lamiroir… you said that the last waiter who served you the right dishes also apologized for the delay, yes?”

“Yes, certainly.”

“Did he say why there was a delay?”

“Yes… He mentioned there was some sort of trouble in the kitchen. It seems they recently installed a breakfast menu and they were still working out a few issues.”

He makes a confident smile. “Well, there we have it! The restaurant gave a good reason why they were a bit slow on delivery!”

“I can understand if a restaurant is a bit slow to get used to a new policy, but it doesn’t explain something else…”

“That being…?”

“If you must know, I was away from my seat for about half an hour. During that time frame, my client received several different items, and when I returned, she was still waiting on them to return the latest one.”

“…Half an hour?” Apollo winces. “Where did you go that’d take so long?”

“I-it wasn’t like that! I just met with someone in there and became preoccupied!”

He blinks. “What? What happened in there?”

“Uh… It was a man lying on the floor. Looked very drunk. I tried to help him wake up, but he got angry and chased me out the door.”

“You mean out the restaurant?”

“No, Your Honor. We stayed in the restaurant.”

“He chased you in the restaurant?”

Apollo rolls his eyes. “Your Honor, I’m pretty sure he means he was only chased out of the bathroom.”

“…” Phoenix looks away, not saying anymore.

The judge sighs. “Oh, I see. That makes sense…”

(Why are you disappointed!?)

Trucy giggles. “Either way, that sounds like fun!”

(I wouldn’t say getting chased out by an angry drunk would be ‘fun’…)

“Anyway!” Phoenix returns to the matter, “In that half hour I was away, my client asked for someone to take the wrong dish away, and yet she was still kept waiting by the end! Slow delivery is one thing, but slow response is a different problem altogether!”

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“But I’d have to wonder why she’d even pull this into court at all. She’s such a nice and gentle lady who doesn’t seem to get bothered easily. If anything, this whole trial just feels like a publicity stunt, but she doesn’t seem like the type. I’d even pick Mr. Wright above her as the schemer…”

“Hmm…”

“What?”

“Oh, nothing. I just thought of some funny idea.”

“…Like?”

“Like… what if Daddy pulled this trial off so we’d meet with some unrevealed truth about Lamiroir that the world had yet to know!?”

“…That’s stupid. And this is a case about Applebees’ terrible service, for crying out loud.”

“…Yeah, I thought it didn’t seem likely either. Especially with this case.”

Before they realize it, their five minutes are up, and the bailiff’s announcement comes like clockwork.

“It’s time. Everyone, please return to your places.”

And so they do.

~

“Ahem. Court is back in session. Now where did we leave off?”

Phoenix offers: “Your Honor, I was explaining how my client was kept waiting-”

“I can’t help it! I have my old man needs!”

“Uh, Your Honor…”

“When you reach my age, you’ll understand. It’s quite vexing.”

“Well, that’s fine and all, Your Honor, but…”

“Oh, it’s most certainly not fine! How many appointments I had to cancel just because I needed to go and couldn’t make it in time…”

(How long does he even need in there to miss more than one appointment!?)

“Your Honor!”

“Yes, Mr. Wright?”

“I was talking about our case at the restaurant.”

“Which restaurant?”

“Applebees.”

Now the judge nods, recalling things. “Oh. Ah, yes, of course… For some reason, I had this lingering impression that this trial wasn’t a real case.”

(Same here.)

“It is a very real case, Your Honor! Please keep that in mind!”

“Very well, but if you really want those ten dollars, we could always ask Mr. Justice to pay up.”

“No, Your Honor. That’s beside the point. Would I bring this case to court just over some silly coupons?”

(Possibly…)

“What? Did you really have a plan behind this whole thing? I thought I was just in it for the deli!”

The entire court goes into a bewildered silence.

“Er, t-that is… I meant to say the ‘deli-beration’ of this very important civil suit!”

The silence continues, but there is one uncomfortable cough.

(…Your Honor, please just stop. That pun made things even worse.)

“…M-Mr. Wright, as you were.”

“Thank you, Your Honor. We should return to the issue at hand.”

“Oh, um… what was the issue?”

“My client was kept waiting, not only for the dish she ordered, but even for the dish she didn’t order to be taken away. Either way you look at it, it’s sloppy service and highly disconcerting.”

The judge nods. “Ah, yes. It seems quite straightforward to me.”

“Hold on, Your Honor.”

“Yes, Mr. Justice?”

“I agree that it’s sloppy service and highly disconcerting, but you also have to consider that situations like this are bound to happen in a busy restaurant setting. It can happen even to the best of restaurants, especially when business is booming.”

“It wasn’t all that booming at the time, though,” Phoenix adds. “There were plenty of empty seats, and it was still within the prime time period for dinner.”

“E-either way, the fact remains that it was a different waiter who served her each time, and while it is poor communication among them, it’s not something so out of the ordinary.”

“Because you don’t see every unsatisfied customer at Applebees starting up suits just because they had a bad time there. After all, if bad service like this happened that much, word would get around pretty quickly and they’d be out of business in no time. But you still see it hanging around anyway. Doesn’t that suggest they still do a pretty good job most of the time?”

“Yes, you do raise a good point…”

“See? I knew I was right!”

“But Mr. Justice, let’s also consider the probability for three different waiters to bring the wrong dish to the same person. It’s not very likely at all, is it?”

“Of course not. But what does that have to do with anything?”

“It has everything to do with this, actually. Why would it be that my client so happened to get this sort of treatment when there were no other reported incidents like this one on that day?”

“Maybe because they just weren’t reported?” Trucy wonders.

“Let’s not go there, Trucy. Mr. Wright is starting to make sense again, and I don’t want to ruin it yet.”

Phoenix continues, “Not to mention, while we could always toss it up to ‘bad communication’, there’s still one other possibility we haven’t taken account for.”

“What!?” Apollo rebuts, “Why would they have any intention to do that? Ms. Lamiroir doesn’t even go there often, does she?”

“No. I’ve confirmed with her on this as well. That visit of ours was the first time.”

“Then, why would they bear any grudge against her?”

“I wouldn’t call it a ‘grudge’.”

“Huh?”

“Instead, they could have been doing so for a different reason.”

Apollo stares, then shakes his head. “…You’ve just lost me.”

“Me too. Where are you going with this, Mr. Wright?”

“I have to admit I’m just going on a whim here myself, but… what if they were trying to catch her attention?”

“Catch her…”

“…attention?”

“Exactly. After all, Lamiroir is a pretty famous name around the world. Suppose there were big fans of her working there. How would they react if they saw ‘The Landscape Painter in Sound’ enter their restaurant?”

“Um… pretty flustered, I guess.”

“That’s right. And people can make some silly, almost novice mistakes when they’re flustered.”

“…Okay, but if you’re saying they wanted to catch her attention, wouldn’t they do better to, well, leave a better impression on her?”

“Obviously, but sometimes, not everything goes to plan when you want to impress someone, right?”

“Right…”

“So, I believe it’s very likely that this example of bad service wasn’t intended to be bad. It just turned out that way due to some basic human error.”

“…Yeah, that’s what I was thinking too.”

“Perhaps some fan of hers wanted to get her dish delivered as quickly as possible, but something happened in the kitchen – let’s say, some amount of spillage for example – and as a result, they ran into some delays.”

The defendant and restaurant owner’s eyes grow wide. It’s as if Phoenix hit the nail on the head.

“Then, in a desperate attempt to cover their mistake, they tried to get something to her instead. Unfortunately, they didn’t have the right thing ready, so they resorted to some others and as a result, Ms. Lamiroir met with some unexpectedly sloppy service… Am I wrong, Mr. Beets?”

The quiet man stares at him in awe, as if he witnessed something amazing happen. “N-no, sir. It’s all as you say.”

“And what about you… Mr. Justice?”

“Huh? Me? Well… it sounds about right.”

He gives a confident smirk. “Then, there we have it.”

The judge pauses to take it all in, but then raises a good question: “Well, that’s quite the truth you’ve revealed, Mr. Wright… but now I’m wondering just whose side you’re on.”

“What do you mean, Your Honor?”

“Well, I would think the one to give this argument is the defendant’s defense, namely Mr. Justice. It’s an argument that would work for their side, after all.”

(…Oh, yeah. Now that I think about it…)

“Oh, I know, Your Honor,” Phoenix answers, “But even if the reasons behind this incident are mainly benign… it doesn’t exactly change the fact that it still happened.”

Apollo blinks. “Huh?”

The judge nods in approval. “Hmm… you’re right as usual, Mr. Wright. Good intention doesn’t cover for careless negligence, after all.”

And now, Apollo is getting flustered. “W-wait. What just happened? I thought Mr. Wright was coming around to our side…”

“Um, Apollo? I think… you just got dunked on.”

“What?”

“Think about it. Daddy knew what arguments you could pull, and he used them before you could, so you can’t use them anymore against him!”

“W… whaaaaaat!?”

Phoenix gives a light chuckle. “Come on, Apollo. You think I’d be so stupid as to sabotage my own case?”

(Argh! I can’t believe I fell for that… His bad acting at the start of the trial totally threw me off!)

“That’s Daddy for ya! Always one step ahead of Apollo!”

(Haha, very funny… It’s not like you caught on that quickly.)

“Actually, I had a feeling.”

“Yeah, well… be quiet.”

“…Well, Your Honor, it seems Mr. Justice has been fully compromised. Shall we proceed with the verdict?”

“Hmm… Well, Mr. Justice?”

“…I’m so done.”

The judge shakes his head. “Well, it seems both sides have reached a consensus on the matter. While the restaurant staff had no ill intentions behind it, they are still responsible for their poor execution of service. Thus, the plaintiff is entitled to the full amount of given compensation… being, ahem, $10.38.”

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Temp Title: Spectral ShadowsTimeline: AU parallel to SoJSpoilers: None for SoJ for now, but we'll seeA/N: Here it is, my rendition of a Mafia-themed AA story set in the time of SoJ, as if to say "what if Ace Attorney went darker and edgier than ever before?" Inspired by the Underground Court theme suggested in the last GS6 interview.

Spoiler: Prologue

It was said that the law fell into a dark age, where public opinion of the courts fell to an all-time low. Though there had long been instances of corrupt prosecutors and defense attorneys throughout the history of the legal world, there were two cornerstone incidents that shocked and frightened even the most loyal of fans.

The first was that of the forging attorney, Phoenix Wright, who was famous for his miraculous turnabouts for the sake of the innocent.

The second was that of the merciless prosecutor, Simon Blackquill, who was renowned for his masterful practices of psychology in law.

Both cases were the result of misunderstandings that erupted out of control. Wright had been framed for a forgery he didn’t commit, and Blackquill had been forsaken as a scapegoat for a murder he didn’t commit.

It wasn’t until seven years after the respective cases that the truth would be brought back into the light, and the need to reform the aging judicial system became most apparent.

Though total system reforms will need more time, there are things the noble-minded among authorities can do in the meantime. Thus, the new chief prosecutor got to work, cleaning house in the Prosecutor’s Office as well as in the local precinct of the corrupt, the unmotivated, and the utterly incompetent of officers and officials. However, it’s obvious to any bystander that this mass purge has left both departments in a bad case of understaffing.

Unfortunately, the crime waves continue to pile on. While the precinct is still busily chugging along as usual, they’ve noticed a few strange circumstances have come about recently.

For one, the old mob families around town seem to have gotten more aggressive. Where they were once hesitant to challenge the perimeters guarded by the force, perhaps due to a decrease in available officers, more and more gangsters have been seen in public. Even certain influential underground powers have expanded their territories. Rivalries between gangs have also shot up, and gang violence has only become more frequent.

For another, there’s been an increase in missing person cases, many of which are suspect to be murders as well. However, all these cases may have a connection: many of the victims have once been involved in law enforcement some way or another. Police officers, legal representatives, and even some government officials have been targeted. And yet, no one at the precinct seems to know who’s responsible or why these people specifically.

But there is consensus among investigators that between the rise of mobs and the rise of missing people, there’s probably some connection. Now, if only they could figure out the how and the why…

And to think all this is happening in the aftermath of the “Dark Age of Law”. It’s almost comically ironic, but it likewise brings ill omens of worse to come.

As this is the first time I'm writing a fanfic that's not based on crack or general silliness, I'd like some feedback for this one. It may start slow for now, but I promise it'll get up to speed soon enough. This time is just a taste of what's to come. Let me know if I have anything I can improve for future chapters!

3/15/17 Edit: I've rewritten the prologue, so it's basically like a completely different story. I should have at least made it sound like it's following after DD. I hope this works.

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

Is this the most shameless fanfiction I've ever written? Possibly. Will it be the last? Probably not.

Title: Rubia in JapaniforniaTimeline: Back and forth between "present" (SoJ) and "past" (trilogy)Spoilers: Possibly for SoJ, but by now, most of us know what's happened.Description: Rubia (the person) one day finds herself living a completely different life than she had been, as the daughter of two prestigious lawyers, no less. And so in an attempt to recover her sanity, she tries to piece together everything that has happened in this strange alternate universe.A/N: The result of a long-standing series of dreams I've had about Ace Attorney that have evolved into a sort of sitcom by this point. I might as well write about it and make it official. I'm bound to toss in a few running gags from the dream thread, so keep an eye out for them.

Spoiler: Prologue

I never asked for this.

One day, I wake up on bed in the middle of the day. I couldn’t remember when I had fallen asleep, but the sunlight is now pouring in through the open shutters. I figured I must have overslept again; I often do on the weekends. It feels like a weekend anyway.

Just outside my door, I hear the sounds of the TV playing. My parents usually get up early, and almost always, they’d turn on the TV to catch up with the usual programs. It’s why I figured it’s a weekend. They’d be at work otherwise.

I drowsily climb out of bed and feel too lazy to change out of my pajamas. Well, chances are that I’d just hop onto my computer or phone and browse away online, and not exactly for what most people would consider “work”. Not that it’d matter; it’s a weekend.

But I might as well head out and get myself ready to start the day. I first go straight to the bathroom to brush my teeth and hair, and wash my face – yada yada, the usual – and then go out to the kitchen for that cup of milk.

Then, I freeze in my tracks.

See, the living room and the kitchen are connected, so it’s easy to see who’s seated on the couch before the TV. And there, I see them.

Not my parents; that wouldn’t have been interesting in the least. Not anybody else’s parents that I knew either. This is my house, after all. I didn’t sleep over at a friend’s this time.

There they are: Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth idling lazily on the couch, watching TV. In my house.

I feel like screaming, but I’m frozen stiff with a sort of perturbed fear. I try to run, but my legs won’t follow.

Phoenix glances over to me and gives a smile. It’s his usual gentle smile; nothing creepy or scary here. But I’m so frightened at the possibility that…

“What’s wrong, dear?”

“I knew it!” I finally find my voice and yell out loud. “For the last time, guys, stop following me! This is my house!!”

They exchange odd looks and turn back to me. “And we’re your parents, so this is our house too.”

I point a threatening finger at them. “I never agreed to be your daughter, you persistent bastards!”

Miles frowns. “Language, Rubia.”

“You don’t control me! Get out of my heaaad!” And I dash back for my room.

I dive straight into the covers of my bed and tuck in snugly. I swear it’s all just a dream and when I’d finally awake, everything would be back to normal.

One. Two. Three. Four…

I start counting in my head, hoping I would fall asleep sooner.

Eight. Nine. Ten. Eleven. Twelve…

Eventually, I exhaust myself from tensing up so much. I relax my limbs and poke my head out from my blanket. It’s still the same ol’ bedroom I’ve seen for a long time. I sigh, lying awake in bed.

It must have been a dream, after all. There’s no way those guys would have shown up in my house otherwise.

Just then, the door opens. And Phoenix steps in.

I slip back underneath the covers once more, like a prairie dog slipping back into its tunnel with a hawk on the lookout.

“Rubia, are you alright? You’re acting a bit strange.”

I don’t answer. I don’t want to answer. This isn’t happening. It can’t be happening.

“…Rubia, get out from under there.”

The next moment, he flips open the blanket. I didn’t grasp it in time and it slips from my fingers. And I’m now crouched on bed in the cool air without the warmth of my precious blanket.

“What’s going on? You wanna talk?”

Finally, I turn to him with a scowl. “For months, I’ve been having dreams about you guys, but I didn’t mind. They were just dreams, after all. No worry that they’d ever cross into reality… and yet, here you guys are.”

“Yeah, here we are, and so are you.”

“What the hell! Why am I in this situation!? Is the world even real anymore!?”

“Calm down, Rubia. The world is still around.”

“It sure doesn’t seem like it.” This time, I tuck my head under the cover of my pillow.

…Wait a second. Pillow? I’m used to having two because they’re so old and flattened. And I usually sleep on a bunk bed, but this is clearly not one. I pull out and look around. I must have been half-asleep when I woke up earlier, since this room doesn’t look like mine as it seemed a moment ago.

The bookshelf with books, the sliding-door closet, and the desk by the window are still around, but the desk is a different color and shape. And I don’t have my usual clothes wardrobe. I realize I even have a lot more video games stacked on the shelves too. And beside the shelves, I have a petite-sized drawer, probably filled with pages and notes of my derivative works.

Wait. Why do I know that? I thought that in my head as if it’s routine. It’s almost as if I’ve become the very image of myself as a fanfiction writer… and have somehow ended up in the world of Ace Attorney. Not just that; I’m living with both Phoenix and Miles, and apparently they’re a married couple.

This is so not right. It doesn’t fit the canon at all. Why else would they be called “Ace Attorneys”, dang it!?

“…You finished collecting yourself?” he asks.

I stare at him for a moment, and then ask back, “Are you and Edgeworth actually married?”

Click here for the Gyakuten Saiban vs Ace Attorney Translation Project Blog!Various official AA stuff translations currently in the works.

Also, click here for the current archive of fanfiction or here for the backup archive. Click here for the blog that updates it.Includes translations of misc. fan works related or not to AA.Also, a very popular fanfic ask meme.

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