Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Confidence...it works!

I've had a pretty introspective set of revelations recently. All due to my confidence.

Let me explain.

Within a month I talked to two girls whom I've been friends with for years. These girls live in Ilinois and back when I did as well there was a time where I felt like I wanted a relationship with them however I was so under confident that I couldn't muster the courage to go beyond friendship. So, when I talked to both of them they both were really surprised that I had felt that way and just thought I was either not interested in them or a private person. Amazingly revealing! They both were interested in me at the time as well!

So it turns out a lot of people saw the side of me that I was blind to: my private side. I used my privacy to mask my under-confidence, and I did it well. Damn. Wow.

Who knows who else this was the same with. I can think of a few but I won't ever see them again probably. All I know now is my confidence has increased ten fold.

The question is. What sparked it? I can think of a few things. One thing is the job i'm at I've had to learn confidence in order to be productive with customers and training agents. I think what I was forced to learn on the job just leaked out into my outside life.

Another thing, more controversially, may have been this time I took a tablet of E. I was alone and I was thinking about my life and why I wasn't achieving certain goals and it dawned on me how much confidence plays a role in our lives in order to get what we want. In fact I began to see how much someone looks more intelligent when they have confidence. It was an Earth shattering point in my life.

Whatever it was i'm glad it happened. I can't imagine going back to the self I was.