My Missing Cat

Three nights ago I let one of my three pet cats out for the night. Molly has not come back since then. I live near a canyon and two nights ago I heard howling that one of my neighbors later assured me were coyotes. Some howls were low and resonant while one was like a high-pitched scream.

I have owned cats for more than 20 years, and I’ve always let them out whenever they wanted. This caused my cat Maya to become pregnant a year ago. One of her kittens was Molly, who has not come back.

Molly was a sweet and trusting cat, and that may have been part of her problem. I have seen her be social with the skunks and raccoons in the canyon. Her mother is more streetwise. I once saw her run from dogs, and she did it in a way that made me think she could take care of herself.

I was once turned away from a local shelter, where I was trying to adopt a cat, when I honestly answered the question of whether my cat would be an indoor-outdoor cat. The shelter seemed to believe the humane thing to do was to deny cats any home, where they might be put in danger of going outdoors.

I differ with this view of humane treatment of animals. To me a cat is only allowed to be a cat when it can go outside, hide in the shadows and hunt mice and rats. Our cat, Maya, was born on a farm in Kansas where the cats were not allowed indoors. This would come as a shock, I’m sure, to that animal shelter I visited.

The disappearance of Molly gives me second thoughts about my cat care, even though I cannot be sure she was killed by another animal. I feel downcast when I think about that middle-of-the-night baying of the coyotes.

My 11-year-old son still walks to the back door in hopes of seeing Molly reappear, and he still calls out to her. We put lost-cat flyers up around the neighborhood with our address and phone number on them.

My wife and I have told our children that Molly probably found a new home and had just gone to live with a new family. I don’t believe that, but it could be true. As for our other two cats, they will continue to be indoor-outdoor. Death is a risk when you venture into the world, but as long as my cats still want to go out-of-doors, I’ll let them.

And when the time is right, I may ask my son if we can have a little funeral for Molly to put her memory to rest. Again… I’m not saying she was killed, but just in case.