9 comments:

Carmie, I am so sorry to read that you are feeling badly, and I can really say that I know how you feel. My sister's would be 50th birthday is coming up on Saturday. She passed from a massive heart attack at 37. That was 12 years ago, and lately it has felt so fresh. I am a far cry from where I was 12 years ago, but I still cry when I think of her. Be gentle with yourself, it is still so new and while things will get better, there will always be questions. Grief, I think comes in waves. And the saying "time heals all wounds," It's crap :-) It feels more like a wound that scabs over and every now and then is yanked off and stings like heck. So we go about loving ourselves better. I don't know exactly how things work "on the other side," but I believe our loved ones never completely leave us. They are a part of us forever and when they are physically gone, we are challenged to listen more closely. Bless you my dear, this week, and always...Janet btw (you're doing much better on the posting than me...and I look for you every day :-)

Oh poppet, I'm so sorry your having a difficult time of it. It's always a difficult time when you approach the anniversary of a loved one's passing, but this to passes. It's been 10 years since my father died, and although I still miss him like crazy, I was a proper daddies girl, it no longer hurts as much as it did. I still get mad at him for going and missing things like his grandsons being born, but these occur less often and aren't always so painful.

What I'm trying to say in a very slapdash way, is don't be so hard on yourself, you need time to heal, we don't suddenly revert back to normal once the funeral is over, in a way our roll in their passing only begins then. Be easy on yourself, there's many stages to grief, I'm still learning them, it get's easier, gradually you'll sleep better, they won't be on your mind so much, you will stop ringing their phone just to hear their voice, you'll be able to hear a song without bursting into tears the second it comes on, you'll stop getting the pity looks, things move on, you won't forget but it does it 'easier'.

Carmie, it is incredible that it has been a year since the passing of yoru brother. I remember you writing about it like it was yesterday. While I have never been through an experience like that, I can only offer one piece of advise: take one day at a time. I do think the anger will eventually subside a bit but the questions will always be there. I am praying for you and your family, especially your sweet dad, sis-in-law and your nieces. This must be a horrible time for them. Hang in there girlie.

I am so sorry you are going through this, Carmie, I know it is a difficult time but you are never alone. I have had 7 close family members pass in the last 10 years. It never gets easy and nights are the hardest. I will be thinking of you.

You touched my heart with your sadness. I think God blesses his tortured children with special mercy, because they need it so much more. I think he blesses their loved ones with peace when they are still and know he is taking care of our loved ones especially. Its ok. If he gives us tomorrow he has a plan. He loves us. You are loved.

Hello my friend. I can't imagine what you are going through and I am so sorry that you have to go through it. The only advice I can give you is surround yourself with positivity and the people that truly love you as best you can, you don't need any negativity right now. Take one step at a time and do things when you are ready. I pray that each step gets a bit easier as you make your way through this first anniversary. You are in my heart and my thoughts my friend.