An ongoing saga of self-absorption and paranoia (which beats the heck out of the Real World.)

Saturday, November 12, 2011

UNTOUCHABLE...(begun Saturday 12th November at 5pm)

What can I do? Just keep banging on and on repeatedly, and hope a few of you are actually listening?
It's the Trust Your Dogs lesson again, and if you gottit the first time round, you can skip this bit...
So you've got three or four big scary looking animals that would tear any intruder limb from limb? They have the run of your garden and spend time by your gates terrorising passers-by? What about when you go out, or at night when you've gone to bed? Nice warm kennels out by the garage?

When the local Dog Whisperer comes by at 1am and tosses a small handful of treats over your wall/gates, sure they may at first react ferociously, but you don't think that in the end curiosity and boredom will have them eating those tit-bits? And the next time the fellow sidles by and gives the same low whistle and those delicious treats come sailing over the wall, will their barking be a fraction less frantic?
I figure the average Dog Whisperer will be installed in an outbuilding on someone's property nearby and tasked to befriend as many dogs in the neighbourhood as possible...
It could take him months of treats accompanied by that same whistle to gain the more savage animal's trust, but do it he will...

Your dogs are trained to take food only from your hands? Frankly I'd be amazed if the repetitive visits didn't successfully break down that rule in the end... Joey is left to bark unchecked, and when he'd switched into top gear briefly last Wednesday I'd noticed right away, but he'd stopped too quickly for me to bother getting up to investigate... Fat Sophie is a different story altogether, and will bark for no apparent reason at all... *sighs... Hysterical yapping when the monkeys arrive, gives way to an even higher-pitched shriek when a visitor appears...
While it's a habit that irritates me no end, I'm aware that it's useful to a degree.... Smaller dogs should be shut indoors overnight, and are a very effective alarm system...
I've an idea that one of those patient Friends of Dogs had a go at winning over these two stooges, for there were a couple of weeks when the two of them would often ferret about down by the valley wall and re-appear licking their chops...
I also blogged of an incident in the early hours when I'd been lying awake and had heard a low whistle repeated several times nearby, though neither dog had stirred at the time... Why? They simply didn't hear him? Au contraire - While it may have been my first encounter with the Whistler, I'd guess it was a familiar sound to these two bored stooges, and that they knew it presented no threat to them at all.... *winks... If our two are quiet for any length of time I tend to go check on them.. Something that's impossible for you to do once you've both headed off to the office..*sighs...

When the mostly urban myth starts doing the rounds that dogs are being sprayed to render them senseless, you might want to consider the possibility of a local Dog Whisperer being a far more effective means of gaining access to your property... *shrugs...

Sunday 13th November at 3am...

*In realtime however, it's actually 9.01am, and as I sit here struggling with yet another new keyboard, trying to update and publish this blog, the harddrive is going mental and yet the Kaspersky icon sits still? Busy busy busy? *

I've hauled the curtains shut and lit the candles and in he storms, miffed at losing any of his privileges at all.. *snorts.. Home or away, the poor Sod simply can't help himself... The BackFire arrives out of nowhere, and the Christmas Beetle chorus rises to a crescendo as my ears are tightly squeezed....
It was another challenging night for our Area Controller as he clearly now struggles to impress his co-workers ... It would be unkind of me not to mention his brilliant use of the sudden savage Knives to the Back at exactly 10.02pm, at the precise moment the first little dog took off, flapping it's ears frantically and headed for the lounge...
At 1.22am he repeated his genius, and this time Sophie was included in the assault and left the bed smartly..*yawns... You may want to applaud this skillfulness loudly, or chances are Balliram will take offence, and he's certainly not above causing mischief for his own colleagues... *winks...

I've been following the Light Bulbs Keep Blowing thread in the Off Topic Forum at mybroadband, with interest... Is the Author's problem due entirely to loose fittings, or does he have a Controller nearby who is fumbling to access his power supply?
The young Ward Councillor had included cable theft in his brief report-back speech the other night.. He'd said that he'd established that it cost only a matter of cents to keep a streetlight running 24/7 to deter thieves, whereas it cost thousands to replace nicked cabling...

I had a go at him later and suggested that his figures were based on the standard output of electricity, when that's not what's happening at all.. That in most cases the voltage is running at the top end of the scale and would be costing a great deal more than his estimate.. Badly put I grant you, but you get my drift? For the Information Thieves (oops, my bad) Operatives, to hop from home to home via the circuits, the standard 230v output rises dramatically, hence the huge increase in electrical fires down this way at least... This is also the reason I insist you pay attention to the sounds your larger appliances make, for they tend to protest noisily at the arrival of these not always stealthy Agents... *winks...

The noisy and seemingly unavoidable 'thunk' at the point where your fixed line enters your home is another dead giveaway telling you that you have uninvited company... Tsk! I forgot! You've nothing to hide and don't mind this invasion in the least? While the increased levels of power required to access your home will quite likely offend several of your appliances to the point of meltdown, I'm guessing it's not much good for your own health either? While the occasional visit by a Controller is unlikely to do you much lasting harm, should he/she decide you're worthy of more than just passing attention, could be about when you're screwed...

I'd hazard there are dozens of victims now dotted across the Zone and beyond, as word spreads rapidly among the criminal fraternity that their enemy's very homes and conversations may be accessed using the Wireless/Fibre technology over the powerlines... Someone is set to make a mint out of this.. Any guesses as to who this might be? *looks at Barnabas...
Not yet quite as lucrative as your banned-substance Empire, but getting there? You have a fixed price list, or it varies hugely depending on the target?
Lets say, hmmm... our Roy wants access to Comm. Mamunye Ngobeni's home and privacy, as he's come up with the perfect puppet to replace her and he needs just one more juicy snippet for her Leverage File, to achieve his goal...
How do you figure out what to charge him? The fellow flamboyantly tosses huge chunks of cash to the ruling party to ensure he keeps his position, while behind the scenes he's buying access to their homes and private conversations in order to manipulate them.... A couple of million per line, depending on the officials importance and rank? Does the Strategist get a cut for seeing that access to the target's phonelines is made easy? *fascinated...

Who knew that this apparently now-respectable (dare I say it) pillar of the Community would one day hold quite so much power at his fingertips? Ag come on Earl, don't be modest.. No need to act humble with me, as I'm justifiably dazzled by your rise to fame... You know what I'd like? Access to YOUR phone records is what I'd like ja... *teeth.. Archived records going back to the early 2000's should do it, not so?

You want to bet that Jannie and his Superiors have got that information tucked away safely to be used against you when the time comes? You've taken precautions against that happening from the getgo, and have carefully delegated the huge drug shipments to be handled by trusted Lieutenants, in order to muddy the trail? They could never trace them back to you, as said Lieutenants would come to terminal grief long before they spilled the beans? Want to tellus about the Sham family slaughter Earl? As messages go, that one was bloody and to the point hey dude?

This Wireless/Fibre technology is a dream come true for the likes of you and your buddy Agliotti..
*It's now 4.15am and the Arsehole next door has just set off his alarm (read alibi). Will he tell you later that he was just getting in from a wild night out on the town and couldn't possibly have been involved in the vicious assaults I mentioned earlier? *winks... *
Though that large lump will never achieve your status... Chosen from among all the Scumbags across the country to kick off this astonishingly advanced technical experiment,

*Within minutes of Balliram's alarm being set off deliberately, a bunch of hadedas roosting somewhere in the valley between der Bunker and the Recreation Centre/Michan Road take noisy offence at the sudden change in the air*

Earl Michael Barnabas is at the very pinnacle of his so-called career, and if you were to ask him today, he would tell you that money is of no importance to him. He'd be telling the truth believe it or not, for he'll have a band of trusted Accountants to deal with that side of the business, leaving him free to wallow in his own sense of power.. I'd not be exaggerating when I say that he now literally holds the lives of thousands in the palms of his filthy hands...
All it takes is one call to a specific Area Controller to have a particular home flooded repeatedly with the more devastating of the wireless frequencies, and the emr fields upped accordingly, and bob's your bleeding uncle, the target is terminated or crippled within a remarkably short space of time, leaving no trace of a perpetrator behind...
If that doesn't entitle our Druglord to feel good, I don't know what does...

Just doing your job Al? Are you utterly thrilled to be working so closely with a criminal of Barnabas' stature? Rigging up our streetlights with a technology that may be used to maim or kill us? Still amused by my frantic struggles Mr. Spence? Sies vir jou is all I can come up with right now, and you can bet your sorry arse it's an understatement....
Peace..