1/18/2010

Last year I did a lot of cleansing of relationships, people, and myself. I had to work on it, I had to work on it hard and let go.

This year, I wanted to make an all around healthier me…I wanted to last year, but the energy was not there.

Now..It’s just flowing, I can only assume because what my soul is carrying around is lighter.

The word "No" is fluent in my vocabulary..and it is easy for once.

No, I do not have the finances right now, No I do not need that peice of cake, No you cannot cross this line. No No No. I dont feel an internal guilt struggle. I just dont... wow.

The word "Yes" has found it's place as well.

Yes I will take a break and have a cup of zen tea, Yes I will go to bed early because I am tired, yes I will leave the laundry in the dryer... and again..no guilt..zip..zero..nada..none.

I read a lot before bedtime now, and I bought some new body lotion and a candle that I love..I cleaned out my truck and switched out some cd's in it. I also cleaned my office space..well..just because...thats what I wanted to do...not because I had to do it.

Im not sure if it really is a new vibe, or a brain tumor, because I actually enjoy going to the gym now instead of loathing it... hmm.

There is still alot to work on..I will always have things to work on, I never want to stop growing and evolving into the person that I am meant to be.

1/06/2010

This is a story I read..im so happy I did, I have another new blog to read! *YaY* I love to read, and this story..is really magical to me...almost like something out of the movies. It's kind of my new muse. It is also tied together the last lines on the poem below about the grandmother.

What an uber cool way to bring in 2010.New Years eve night I had the most vivid beautiful dream.

I was in Colorado, visiting my grandmother, then I decide to travel to this familiar place. I had seen it in many dreams before over the years. It was mountain that was flat at the top. I would hike there, then rest.

This time the dream continued on.I was winding through the mountain roads.

The road I was on was actually cut through the mountain so on my left and right were towers of beautiful rock. It was spring, and life was..just..everywhere.

To my right were these huge white flowers the size of magnolia blossoms..tons of them winding up and down. I stopped and drank from the stream and the water was cool and so pure.

Then I was inside the mountian and there were etchings all allong the wall.Ancient carvings..beautiful art.Then I remember standing in front of the most magnificant one.The etching was over 5 feet tall. It was of just a lions head, mane flowing.The expression was relaxed, but confident, it's eyes were intuitive and peaceful.

I reached across and touched the stone, I almost did not want to..it was ..like ..holy ground...

The Almighty Heidi

Starbucks junkie,vanilla latte' holic. Obsessive pen chewing,compulsive hair color-er, and chap stick addict. My older brother Mark is my superhero, so I called him Captain Markle, and I became his side kick, the "Almighty Heidi". (Thus the name) This is where let it all out...whatever "it" is.