The Misadventures

BITS & PIECES: TALES FROM A 3RD TIME DELIVERY

The nurse is tall and thin and beautiful and funny. My husband knows her. I snap this picture after suggesting to him that the nut eating and the Red Sox watching and the hot girl nurse knowing is DRIVING ME INSANE.

MONDAY 12PM: “Kristin, it’s a full moon tonight, the Labor & Delivery floor is getting crowded, and you aren’t techincally in labor yet. They might try to send you home. Scream loudly. They won’t send you home if they know you are in pain. My shift is over, do what I say. Our secret. Good luck.”

The hot girl nurse is now my best friend for life.

MONDAY 1PM: “You brought Sriracha. From home.”

MONDAY 9PM “I can’t get it to stop, bear with me.”

I hear chuckling and happy voices and remarks about his size. I pick my head up and see the Midwife’s face concerned. I lay my head back in exhaustion and hold him for the first time. Our souls match.

MONDAY 10:30PM “This room is a lot smaller than last time”

It was a long day and a longer night. It’s done I breathe a sigh of relief and settle into the crisp white pillow and sheets. It wasn’t done.

11:30pm “Call the Midwife. We need her approval before we can start the line.”

They’ve have seen this before. They start to move as a unified front. He is ushered aside and ignored the way men are in a Maternity Ward by women who are used to the pain and the blood and the urgency.

MONDAY 11:45PM “Give it to her, now, it’s almost too late.”

It’s too late.

MONDAY 11:50PM “I’m sorry, you are not going to like this. But you’ve hemorrhaged and we have to get the clots out.”

I look to the left and grab his hand. I mouth WHAT THE FUCK and he agrees. The medicine that was supposed to make this less awful kicks in 5 minutes too late and the room goes dark.

TUESDAY 7:30AM Soft Cooing

It’s Tuesday April 11th at 7:30AM and I’m enjoying the sounds of my nut-eating-Red-Sox-watching-Sriracha-packing-hot-nurse-knowing man that I couldn’t have done this without.

JUNE, 2017

You were worth it. The pain and the blood and the scary urgency. I would do it over and over and over again if it meant I get you and your siblings in the end.