News from 2100-2500 Wisconsin Ave, NW, DC

Blow struck for God with frat paddle, police say

In the early morning hours of March 31, two strangers got into a religious debate inside The Mason Inn (2408 Wisconsin Ave.), according to a police report. “A heated conversation occurred between them,” the report states: one of the men opposed religious practice, while the other strongly supported it. “This led to them leaving Mason Inn and then getting into a physical altercation” in the vicinity of Davis Place, the report states.

During the fight, the godly combatant hit the atheist with a wooden fraternity paddle, causing lacerations above and below the unbeliever’s right eye. Police were called to the scene, and they seized the paddle as evidence. The report lists the name of the paddler as “unknown.” The incident is under investigation by the Alcoholic Beverage and Regulation Administration.