Monday, May 25, 2009

Sunshine Cleaning came out two months ago and we finally made it to the theatre on Saturday. The cast is fantastic - Amy Adams, Emily Blunt, Mary Lynn Raskjub, Alan Arkin, and this wonderful little guy whose name I missed. The writing could've been a little tighter but overall, very good movie with a nice mix of fun and heart.

So want to know how to make the experience border on a panic attack for me?

It's an out of the way independent theatre and there were less than ten people in the audience. Yet just as the film began, a woman stumbled in and sat right in front of us.

But not just any woman. No, this woman was my ex-therapist.

Yes, the theatre is literally next door to her offices. Yes, she told me she often catches a movie there after finishing up with her patients on Saturday afternoons. But what were the chances that she would pick that particular showing of a movie that had been out more than two months?

I spent the entire film thinking about anxiety issues, my dissatisfaction with the therapist, the upcoming family vacation. As soon as the credits rolled, I darted out of the theatre and into the bathroom. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but then I was afraid to exit the stall.

Eventually, we made our way to the car and continued on our day. I'm not sure why she caused such a reaction in me. Honestly, I've been teetering on the edge of panic for the last few days (Friday morning I had a full-blown attack before work - wish I'd spaz at a time I felt comfortable trying out one of those xanax!).

Anyways, the movie is worth seeing.. Just not with your uninvited therapist if you want to have a good time.

P.S. Yes, I spell it theatre as opposed to theater. It's because I think I'm BritishI'm totally better than you old habits are hard to break.

17 comments:

you ARE totally better than everyone, so you should just change the spelling for whatever words you desire.

that is why i hate going out in public also.

i think that when you don't want to see particular people, the universe gives you a good ol' f*ck you and it's a guarantee that you will keep running into them.

stupid universe.

andy

p.s. split the pills? more than likely you'll just be a bit drowsy. not sure about xanax, haven't tried it. i use ativan...has a chemical in it that is like one in our body that causes us to reeeeelax. try the pill, dude. i had mine for two months before i was brave enough. now i carry them everywhere just in case. don't always need them, but it's nice to have the option. they take away the awful physical/psychological feelings that come with anxiety.

One solution to never* running into anyone from your past that you never want to see again? Move to the other end of the world. Has worked for me so far. And, it is [mostly] better here anyways, so win - win.

And, I totally agree with Andy on the pills as well. I too use ativan (& carry them with me everywhere), and I haven't tried xanax, but just try it. They might help make your life so much easier. Ativan sure has for me.

*Of course there is always a chance that, as Andy put it, the universe wants to give you a good ol' f*ck you, and send someone halfway around the globe on vaycay for a chance meet, so let's not jinx ourselves.

I have never been to a therapist but I do talk to God everyday and I hope to run into Him in Heaven...lolI would have been uncomfortable too having someone sitting in front of me who I never wanted to see again....how awful. I will tell you xanax is good for immediate relief of anxiety. If you have to keep busy like if you are at work as long as you keep busy and don't sit down and relax you will not get drowsy with it. But if you are sitting you will nod off....also take a very low dose to start off with.

Andy - Hmm, I'm gonna start spelling "awesome" a new way then - "Cate". Yeah, that's it. And I'm totally gonna try the xanax still before we go away. I still have 11 days, 22 hours, 57 minutes...

Wife O Riley - I'll have to see if we have a drive-in theatre around here. Though I tend to fall asleep during night movies.

Snarky - This is why we moved so far from home as well. But we've been here long enough to have acquired new undesirables. Life on the run's tough when you crave routine and familiarity.

Blognut - At least I was with Joe and he knows I went to see her. I just didn't find her very professional and I can imagine running into her with a coworker/family member and her just running off at the mouth. "Oh, is this that mother we spent so much time talking about.

Lisa - Good to know about staying on the move with the xanax.

Yaya - I need to get back to the meditating. I mostly did it to fall asleep. Right now, my meditation area doesn't inspire peace.

Juliet - It stinks because I love this little theatre. It's old but independent and they have awesome cookies and wine! She needs to find a new place to go!

She - Glad I'm not alone in reacting that way to a therapist sighting. Some people, you just don't want to see out in the wild. They need to stay in their professional environment and quit having a life that might intersect with mine!

You do not ever need to feel anxious about seeing an ex therapist. It is your right as a patient to change whenever you need or want to. You don't need to make excuses to anyone.My SIL is an R.N. . She sometimes has to take a Xanax while at work. I don't know if there are different strengths but she does fine.My husband has to take adivan while we are just talking about him leaving the house. He has to take 6 of them to get out the door.

It's totally MYOB, but I hope that you are engaging in some practices (or seeing a NON ex therapist!) to help out these anxiety/panic attack issues! I know they are super hard for you and in your life. Hugs.

About Me

It's a blog. I'll probably write stuff in it.
Me, I'm married, no kids, two cats, one boring job. My life isn't that exciting so I like to complicate things with overthinking, health issues, and anxiety attacks. I also enjoy reading, writing, travel (if I could control the anxiety attacks), wine, hockey, and music. And long walks on the beach. And a sugar daddy.