Everything else

LONG BLOG

As an artistic-sensible kind of guy I tend to think about a big picture in my head that satisfies a sense of closure of themes. That is, whatever themes the game is built on - in my case these themes I could perhaps call "surreal exploration". Let's just go with that. The big pictures gives the story a nice closure and hopefully intrinsic meaning layered through the mechanics which I build piecemeal, maximizing meaning all along. With the big picture fully in place - well the player doesn't feel like he was wasting his time playing a weird flashing screen with their keyboard. That's the closure I was talking about.

Kickstarters have no context to the situation or story. If you're lucky, they know how games are designed. All they get are the first 3 levels and those levels themselves are built for a reason that cannot be closed. It's all left open. I'm wide open. That's why I take hits in every rink on the planet. Nobody gets me. Nobody knows what the 1000 line of dialog I will write - they're only vapor inside my body I can't create them for any one person at any one time. I can only create them in the context of my own code writing sessions and I can control them but I'm not in complete control.

So what? So I should have done it all for free up front right? Then they would be in love with my game. Instead of giving the tip, give em a polished stone, a long stone with their context. And do EVERYTHING right. Make 3 or 4 draft videos and get the images to look nice and just make everything REAL nice and the game is big, bigger, and theres more enemies available right off the bat for free and more interesting enemies and the players are like "oh that was a fun one minute loop! just there" It's janky, but they know it, and they're on board!

Fuck that.

Fuck you for free. For you? Fuck no. These are the same people that drove Phil Fish to quit LOOKING in their DIRECTION. If they want in on the fun they can buy their ticket just like I did. Game didn't make it's damn self. Shit was hard. Real hard. Took years. IT TOOK YEARS. It didn't NOT take years, it took YEARS.

And what? Am I just in the wrong? No. My game is fun. If you disagree, your fingers are wrong. Besides. I know exactly how many people played the demo. Four people. (Not that there's anything wrong with that) If you didn't play the demo you don't have shit to say to me. If you did play the demo you STILL don't have shit to say to me. HOWEVER if you played the game and you have something to say about it, I'd love to hear it! :D

The only thing that is wrong is my connection with your brain. When it comes to my game the science is out. It's all faith and guts. No facts and figures. That's a perfect reason to not purchase it but no reason to complain. I could complain for a centuries time but I will just go ahead and do that.

So yeah, that's just my pattern you know? I think of an idea, I create the big pic, and I close it. And I've went ahead and done that several times now. When I get that complete I do my favorite part. Well no. But hey, I certainly do it. I just tosh that shit up on reddit anywhere I think it makes sense. Plop it on facebook. Couple other portals and bam.

pERF eggshampull: I created a simple Android game that has it all. You know? No one has the right to pain about it because it's... It's just a different feel alltogether. To them the poop is just a little less stinky. It's not really popular but no one complains. I could probably pimp that dumb game for years and unless people noticed my spamming they would just be like "oh whatever, scroll"

SO yeah! Back to the KS deal. Toss that shit on reddit for sure! I'm like "Hey here's my game lol" (Actually, I just say it's a kickstarter game for their consideration) cross my fingers for luck. I might be lucky I might luck out. I did my homework and I'm ready for game time but afaik the game just won't work out for me. I ain't bitter really but I just know it's a long shot. Oof. Oh well. I can do some other crap I gueesssssssssssss. :/

And then I want to you know, make that little experience I created, the little demo - I want it to have MINICLOSURE so I gotta basically create an epic scene of the death of a character. So wait, what? Why am I doing this again? Oh. for free. Great. Maybe I'll make one more reddit post, ya know? I mean I either win or lose so no harm in trying to win!

Oh god. I mean I make Android games, there just isn't that much time between one release and another release. Check out my history and it's fucking spamalot. AFAIK that's completely breaking the rules of reddit, I'm way over accepted % limit ya know? So now I'm being punished for making the game. I mean obviously that's a LIE I coulda played my cards differently, made a few more reddit text comments, and a few less self posts. maybe share a few youtube videos? I dunno. But hey, that's now how I did it you know? Just wasn't thinking in that context and it becomes ammunition for opposition.

Oh can I take a break? All this reminds me of that time Chad got kicked through a table because he did Let's Plays. How weird is that?

So now what do ya do you know? You got your game with no context and hey, it's fun. You can't take that away from me. My fingers don't lie. I never told anyone it was worth something but I was kinda hoping we'd all agree it's worth something someday for sure! I mean if you don't wanna go down that road I understand but, what do I do next ya know? Megaman game? And that's for free too? Or is it ad based? Do I get a sure thing? Guess not. I think the point is, the thing I can learn is to be persistant.

But what do you do when you're playing a broken video game? What do you do when your goal is to "TELL EVERYONE" and telling everyone is punishable. You know I don't think I'm dumb. I'm smart. But maybe I'm simple. That could be a blessing and a curse. My contribution too then must be a blessing and a curse? Is anything real? Is rock and roll really there? Can you feel it too?

C

Note: got in a huge fight with a commenter on reddit and ended up giving him 3 points.