6. First Time

Calm down, Jacob. Just calm down. This is all fine, it’s perfectly normal… and you’re in no way a pedophile, so just calm down already. Yelling won’t help anyone, dumbass. Oh god, she’s looking at me. Oh, that’s just because you’re staring at her… Avert your eyes!!

As interesting as my monologue was, I had to tear myself away from it when Ness extended her hand in my direction, a warm smile splayed across her face.

“Hello, Mr. Black. It’s nice to meet you,” she said. I was reluctant to take her hand for reluctance to let it go once I took it, but I did. And she used this ‘gift’ of hers to explain it all away. This was Bella’s daughter. Somehow, I’d known that before she’d said it, but it was nice to know I wasn’t making it up all the same.

I nodded in response, finally managing to break my gaze and look at Issy. “Go get Ephraim,” I ordered firmly. I glanced back at Ness, releasing her hand. Was it just me, or was she glowing?

“Mom said to…” Issy immediately began to protest.

“I said go get Ephraim. He needs to be here for this,” I said in a strictly parental tone, underlying alpha timbre included.

Issy squeaked a mild “Yes, sir,” before running off to get her brother. Just as she left, her other brother, Manasseh, entered the kitchen behind me, sitting down at the bar and looking sheepish from when I had snapped at him.

“Hullo, Sawyer,” Manasseh said, bringing the Clearwater boy to my attention. I glared at him. I could tell he was after Ness. And that wasn’t going to be happening any time soon, believe me.

“Go home, Sawyer,” I said flatly. No funny business.

“I’ve gotta take Ness ho…”

I cut him off. “I’ll take care of it. Just go home.”

Sawyer didn’t bother arguing this time, but just ran off like the puppy he was, figurative tail between his legs. I sighed and leaned against the counter, rubbing my temples. What to do, what to do. Why was it that every time my life was just about figured out, something like this happened? Besides, imprinting wasn’t supposed to happen to me. If not with Bells, then with no one. But was this really so much different? The answer of course, yes. This was totally different than imprinting on Bella. For Christ’s sake, I’d gone and imprinted on her daughter.

I broke out of my thoughts. “No. I want to explain to my family first.”

Ness looked puzzled. “They don’t know?”

“Don’t know what?” I asked helplessly. “That I randomly transform into a wolf from time to time? That the ability is hereditary? That I could have imprinted all these years with no warning but still recklessly started this family anyway? No. They have no idea.”

I ignored him and rubbed my temple again, just beginning to make some sense of the situation again when Issy made an appearance again with my oldest son. Ephraim was looking sicker than when Manasseh and I had gone cliff diving earlier, when we had experienced a little accident. After a clumsy moment, I had tripped off one of the low cliffs and gashed open my stomach. Manasseh thought I was dead. But then he saw my skin knit itself back together before his eyes, a startling experience, I was sure, seeing as none of my family was aware of my being a wolf, much less the abilities that came with it.

When I came back to the present, Manasseh still looked mightily confused, and Ephraim like he was fighting the urge to hurl. Not on the carpet, please. Issy was watching Ephraim warily, obviously concerned for him. Those were my kids. This was my family. I kept my eyes trained on the kids a moment longer, but quickly felt almost as sick as Ephraim was. Suddenly I was wishing I had paid attention to Sam all those years ago and never gotten married to Lizzie. I wished so much right then, but wishing is pretty useless when it comes down to it. I found myself returning to the present for the second time.

“Do you all remember the Quileute stories I used to tell you when you were babies?” I asked my three kids at large.

“Yeah,” said Manasseh, speaking for the three of them, though he still looked completely lost.

Issy wasn’t following either. “What’s this got to do with anything, dad?”

I winced a little. Why was this so hard? “It has everything to do with this, I promise, Issy.”

Ness tapped my shoulder. “Maybe I should explain it, Jacob? Like I did for you?”

I ignored the fact that everything Ness had said went completely over my now inquiring children’s heads. “Yeah. Go ahead.”

Ness nodded and reached across the counter, laying her hand over Manasseh’s cheek where he said at the bar. Understanding flashed over his face, followed by more confusion. Ness touched Ephraim’s cheek and Issy’s hand simultaneously, her face sullen as she looked at Issy sympathetically.

“I’m so sorry, Issy,” she said quietly, sitting down at the table beside my daughter, beside her friend. Issy sat perfectly still, breathing questionable by her stillness. Manasseh was still too, and Ephraim more than likely asleep with his head down on the table.

The silence continued until Manasseh spoke up. “So you’re a wolf like the stories,” he said, the question becoming a statement. I nodded, and Issy provided the follow up questioning.

Her face looked hurt. “If you’re a wolf, and you knew you could imprint, why did you marry mom when you knew she wasn’t the one meant for you? Didn’t you realize this had to happen eventually?”

I didn’t have an answer for her. Tears started to bleed from her eyes, but I stayed silent.

“What have you done?” she accused in a deadly tone, getting up from her seat, then helping Ephraim from his. That concerned me immediately.

I was on the other side of the counter immediately. “What are you doing with your brother? He’s sick.’

Issy glared at me. “I know that. I’m taking him back to his room where I should have left him to begin with.”

I wasn’t listening, though. I was seeing other things besides Issy’s immediate anger at me. Things like Ephraim lifting his head and looking at his sister, then at me. Ephraim quivered. My stomach dropped out from under me, horrified. There was no way this was happening.

“Issy, let go of your brother,” I said in the best tone I could manage. I didn’t want him any angrier.

Issy looked scandalized. “No! What part of sick don’t you comprehend?”

Ness was seeing what I was seeing, though. “He’s right, Issy,” said Ness softly. “Let him go.”

Issy let go of him, but I think it was only a technicality due to her whirling around to face Ness, absolutely livid. “Shut up, Ness. Just shut the foot up.”

If Issy had said that at any other time, I probably would have laughed. My attention was focused on Ephraim, though, as he supported his weight against the counter.

“She smells awful…” he muttered before ripping his clothes to shreds as he phased.