Aw, the only word I can think of for this fic is sweet. It's very well written, but the only thing I think wrong with it is that you haven't quite developed Raven's personality enough, or your other OC, Moira. Is he shy, or sophisticated or both? And Moira, erm, I get the sarcasm, but I think you could've worked it better into the way she describes things around her. I know you've already finished this fic, but I think your characters should have a few bigger faults.

And Hojo? He's creepy. You did him well. Aww, I hope Jamie comes back- he's really cute too. If you want to discuss any of the points I've made feel free to mail me.

Wow, this story is amazing so far! I think it's really sweet, but I think you need to work on your character a bit more- your character sounds a lot younger than twenty. I'll try and finish reading this when I have more time. Anyway, check out my oneshot fic Fireflies sometime!

“Moira,” said a familiar voice in my head. “Let me do battle with this beast instead.”

-This line reminded me of Celestial Legend: Ceres (I think that's the anime" There's a woman who heard a vioce

in her head before she went on a power spree. It said, "Release me. I am the real you."

Just a thought, but shouldn't Egdar have kept some speck of magic that his ancestor had after the War of Magi?...No wait...magic all but disappeared after the Goddess Statues went bye bye.

“Oh, my name is Terra Katana.

-why am I not surprised...she's been reincarnated from the Life Stream, right?

Anyway, blame my fallies on my sleep driven mind that wants more sleep. Besides that, I love the chapter as you see. I put in some things I thought kicked major ass so that's also like free advertising.

1. I love the fact you're finally getting the main characters in there. Cid was a good one. I love how you handled him. Almost thought you had a Tifa, but I corrected myself. However, I would have been disappointed if Vincent had not been in the mansion. Oh Baby, he's got cool points.

"Mog was the name of a moogle that helped save the world thousands of years ago, kupo"

-Heh...I was going to get onto you about that reference but how the world's don't belong together when I realized that this was a crossover. Maybe I'm just out of it today.

Aww that was such a cute chapter! I liked Rumple and Holly's little background story. As for Edgar well all Figaro's are flirty i guess. Wonder how long it'll take him to decide where to go with the castle. Well done battle scene. Keep up the good work, kupo!

Damn, Moira, that's wicked! Now you can continue things and umm...keep writing all that cool stuff that you do. I'm rather curious if the esper and the human sides will ever agree, being two at once. It might be interesting. Good luck!