First off, you have a very interesting plot here! I can definitely see that it is based off of the story Rapunzel. I really enjoy stories based off of fairy tales! :)

I really like how you included parts of the Daily Prophet articles. It shows what a big deal Nymphadora's kidnapping was. I also liked Ron and Hermione's characterization. They were both realistic and I liked how Ron was joking about her not dating anyone until fifty. :P That seems so Ron-ish!

Okay, critique time! :) I noticed that after dialogue you're capitalizing pro-nouns. Like in this sentence:
"I'm never going to let anything bad happen to you." She murmured to her.
^The 'She' should not have a capital 's.' Check in any HP book and you'll see that there aren't any capitalized pro-nouns.

Overall, a very interesting start! I like the originality of this. I don't, however, think this actually happened to Ron and Hermione, but I think that's kind of the point of the story. It's not realistic but at the same time an enjoyable story on its own. Good job! :)

~Rosie

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Yeah I know this is totally not-canon but I thought that it would make an interesting story anyways so I wrote it! :P Yeah I see what you mean about the pronouns, and although I probably won't change these first two chapters for now, I'll make sure they don't show up again in the following chapters. Once again, thank you!