Overheard at the Gathering of the Juggalos

During the Gathering of the Juggalos, Cave-In Rock, Illinois becomes a sonic disaster zone. Even if you're a rap lover, it's hard to keep your mind sharp with all of the noise. But within the cacophony of sounds, a few incredible Juggalo statements were somehow overheard by our numbed ears. The things these people said may not make a ton of sense, but when you are surrounded by a constant thundering bass drum, the maniacal shouting of "whoop, whoop," and the occasional dynamite explosion in the distance ... you probably wouldn't make a whole lot of sense, either.

"Oh shit, Metallica!" [starts headbanging]

- One way to be sure that you're at the Gathering is that the Black Album by Metallica is always playing. And no one seems disappointed.

Nate "Igor" Smith

A juggalo with a "drug bridge" T-Shirt at the Gathering.

"Its synthetic acid. It's from Canada. I won't sell you more than two hits."

Upcoming Events

- Three sketchy kids wearing gym shorts were sitting outside of a tent with a sign that read, "$10 TRIP YOUR FACE OFF" and said this to us. They claimed to be selling a hallucinogen called 2CB. After hearing reports the next day of multiple overdoses on a drug called 25i (also called N-Bomb, a derivative of 2CB), this encampment mysteriously disappeared. They also offered us a money back guarantee.

- Three people praying near the "From Juggalo to Christian" tent by the entrance

"There's only nine hot girls in this whole thing."

"You smell that shit? You almost throw up. That coke--its almost like molly."

- Two quotes from a group of guys we tried to trade a tallboy of Budweiser to after a short-lived attempt to see what we could barter up to from a beer. We quickly found out that no one had anything worth trading.

"Fuck your camera--this is for us, not you."

- Yelled from a tent to a photographer

"This is a synthetic drug. It should act like a normal drug--then people started reacting poorly."

- Random Juggalo

"Oh shit, it leaked down my leg."

- Random Juggalo

[chanting] "Pan-ty sniff-ers! Pan-ty sniff-ers! Tell you what, he said he'll put on the thong and let you smell it."

- Yelled through a megaphone by a large man wearing a sleeveless black work shirt

"I landed on my belly and just started slidin'. Then the four wheeler hit me in the back."

- A sunburned man in his forties to a sunburned man in his twenties

"Have you seen how they clean these things? They just open a door and blast a hose."