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Friday, July 1, 2011

the mother in law BLOW OFF

In case you guys missed this email that began circulating the internet yesterday, you have to stop what you're doing it and read it right now.

This was addressed to Heidi from her soon to be mother in law, pictured above.

from: Carolyn Bourne to: heidi withers subject: your lack of manners

Here are a few examples of your lack of manners:

When you are a guest in another's house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat - unless you are positively allergic to something.

You do not remark that you do not have enough food.

You do not start before everyone else.

You do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your host.

When a guest in another's house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early - you fall in line with house norms.

You should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughter.

You regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself why. No one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity style behaviour.

I understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters' marriages.)

If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes.

One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddie.

Yikes! Although, I'm sorry--- anyone that helps themselves to seconds without asking had this coming. Who the hell does Heidi Withers think she is? Bitch.

I know, how funny would it be if Heidi Withers is actually the world's worst daughter in law. I really want to know what the insult in the pub was all about. I bet the poor girl laid in bed late, because she was avoiding the annoying family. I think my fave line is "you fall in line with house norms" LOL. What if house norms include rape and torture?

about the blow off

We've all been blown off, we've all blown someone off. Share your story: the blow off texts, emails, voice mail messages you've either sent or received to mark the end of a relationship. And if the blow off consisted of a disappearing act, post a missing person's report. Or just read stories about break ups in general.