The Clock is Ticking…

As a single Christian woman in the ladder part of her thirties, my family and closest friends are consistently making comments and innuendos about my unmarried and childless status. Now please understand that it’s not that I don’t desire to settle down, get married and possibly have children; but I refuse to settle for less or attempt to help God out with this one. You see, I don’t just want a husband and a marriage; I want the right husband and a happy marriage. During my life, I have learned the hard way what happens when I decide that God needs my help and I act on it. For some reason, each time I have stepped up to help Him out – it has never worked in my favor. So with this one – I’ve decided to let go and let God handle it.

Now, according to Proverbs 18:22 (NIV), “the man who finds a wife finds a treasure and receives favor from the Lord.” You see I interpret that as it is not my job to find him but that he finds/searches for me. Essentially, it is not only his job to find me, but he gets a double benefit when he does – um, think on that one! Later in Proverbs 19:14 (AMP), I read the words, “houses and riches are the inheritance from fathers, but a wise, understanding, and prudent (discreet) wife is from the Lord.” Now this scripture reference tells me, that when the Lord directs/guides the man to his wife (me and you) that she possess certain qualities. So in my brilliance, I decided that while I wait for Mr. Right, maybe it would be in my best interest to ensure that I align myself with the characteristics of this wise, understanding and prudent woman. Now the best reference and description of this “ideal woman” can be found in Proverbs 31, also known as “the virtuous woman”.

As I began to explore the characteristics and qualities of this woman, I discovered the following virtues and said to myself – let the transformation begin. So, if you find yourself in a similar position as me – I encourage grasping hold of these virtues, and also starting the transformation process. Together we can agree that God will send Mr. Right, after all He is a good God and I believe that He will honor our patience and faithfulness.

Trustworthy

Trustworthy – worthy of trust or confidence, dependable, honest

“The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil.” Proverbs 31:11

Supportive

Supportive – giving support or help, comfort, encourage

“She comforts, encourages, and does him (her husband) only good as long as there is life within her.” Proverbs 31:12

Skillful/Creative and Diligent

Skillful/Creative – possessing expert knowledge or a developed aptitude or ability; showing imaginations or originality

Diligent – characterized by care and perseverance in carrying out tasks

“She seeks out wool and flax and works with willing hands [to develop it]. She is like the merchant ships loaded with foodstuffs; she brings her household’s food from a far [country].” Proverbs 31:13-14

“She considers a [new] field before she buys or accepts it [expanding prudently and not courting neglect of her present duties by assuming other duties]; with her savings [of time and strength] she plants fruitful vines in her vineyard.” Proverbs 31:16

“She lays her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.” Proverbs 31:19

“She makes fine linen garments and leads others to buy them; she delivers to the merchants girdles [or sashes that free one up for service]. Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]! She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness [giving counsel and instruction]. She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat.” Proverbs 31:24-27

Organized and Prepared

Organized – having a formal organization to coordinate and carry out activities

Prepared – to make ready or equipped

“She rises while it is yet night and gets [spiritual] food for her household and assigns her maids their tasks.” Proverbs 31:15

“She fears not the snow for her family, for all her household are doubly clothed in scarlet. She makes for herself coverlets, cushions, and rugs of tapestry. Her clothing is of linen, pure and fine, and of purple [such as that of which the clothing of the priests and the hallowed cloths of the temple were made].” Proverbs 31:21-22

“Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]!” Proverbs 31:25

“She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat.” Proverbs 31:27

Healthy

Healthy – having good physical and mental well-being, free of sickness and disease

“She girds herself with strength [spiritual, mental, and physical fitness for her God-given task] and makes her arms strong and firm. She tastes and sees that her gain from work [with and for God] is good; her lamp goes not out, but it burns on continually through the night [of trouble, privation, or sorrow, warning away fear, doubt, and distrust].” Proverbs 31:17-18

“Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]!” Proverbs 31:25

Compassionate

Compassionate – caring; inclined to pity or mercy for the suffering of others

“She opens her hand to the poor, yes, she reaches out her filled hands to the needy [whether in body, mind, or spirit].” Proverbs 31:20

Beautiful and Stylish

Beautiful – having a pleasing combination of qualities in a person or object; having a particular grace or excellence

Stylish – conforming to current style; fashionable

“She makes for herself coverlets, cushions, and rugs of tapestry. Her clothing is of linen, pure and fine, and of purple [such as that of which the clothing of the priests and the hallowed cloths of the temple were made].” Proverbs 31:22

“A capable, intelligent, and virtuous woman–who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls.” Proverbs 31:10

Powerful and Secure

Powerful – having much power to affect others and produce effects

Secure – without care or anxiety, confident in expectation, assured

“Her husband is known in the [city's] gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.” Proverbs 31:23

“Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]!” Proverbs 31:25

“Many daughters have done virtuously, nobly, and well [with the strength of character that is steadfast in goodness], but you excel them all.” Proverbs 31:29

“A virtuous and worthy wife [earnest and strong in character] is a crowning joy to her husband, but she who makes him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.” Proverbs 12:4

Wise and Nurturing

Wise – having knowledge; able to use knowledge well, judging rightly, discreet, dictated by wisdom

Nurturing – care for and encourage the growth or development of

“She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness [giving counsel and instruction]. She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat. Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied.” Proverbs 31:26-28

Deserving of Praise

Praise – to be spoken highly of; glorified

“Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied); and her husband boasts of and praises her, [saying], many daughters have done virtuously, nobly, and well [with the strength of character that is steadfast in goodness], but you excel them all. Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain [because it is not lasting], but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised! Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates [of the city]!” Proverbs 28-31

Source: Holy Bible (AMP) and Merriam Websters’ Dictionary.

About the Author

Anita "AC" Clinton, author, speaker and coach, is the COO/Editor-in-Chief of wakeUPgirl Magazine. Anita’s passion is helping others bridge the gap to achieving their dreams and purpose in life. She believes that we were all created for greatness and the world is waiting for the manifestation. For more information, visit her website at www.acclinton.com.