New to the site

Hi, I'm new to the site; I found it because I was looking for answers. People always say it's hormones for thinking you're different from others, and they have their "vampire" stages, but I don't think I'm that, and I know it's not my hormones...

I always have the weirdest deja vu moments, I recognize random people whom I've never met, I will freeze and become unresponsive for ten minutes without knowing it (My friends would say I died) amd during that time, I would see darkness, my vision yellowed, running through something. I have really random weird thoughts that I'd wonder where on Earth they came from (nothing really bad) And I have really odd dreams... I often see weird figures in shadows, and ALWAYS feel something with me at all times; paranormal I guess you could say. There's always an animal, but I feel a sucking darkness sometimes... It's really hard to express how these things feel, but there's something so different.... I was with my church group and they'd said something about Nephilims, and I almost fell. I didn't even know what it was yet, and I had to hide my reaction... I didn't know why, and still really don't.. But they'd talked about what it was briefly, and something just felt REALLY weird, like something was trying to explode in me...

There is A LOT more, but now that I've put myself on the spot, I can't really remember everything.. But am I in the right place?

I should also point out, that I looked into it a bit, and in a way, somehow it feels... I feel something with it, but I don't make others fall down.

I've tried figuring out what was so different from me, and I even wondered if I was meant to be the Messiah, but I knew I couldn't be. Especially because I'm a female.

But I'm one of those people you RARELY ever ever find. Ever. I'm loyal, fun, chaste, etc. I'm not bragging, but it's what I hear a lot. I grew up being super super boyish, so I'm still getting used to the compliments, but this feels so weird.

The Bible said the Nephilims were pretty much bullies, and it was violent, but the daughters were fair, etc.. I'm wondering if I was a daughter... I just hope I don't sound insane...

Hi TheLostOne, I couldn't quite find how your topic related to _el's so if you don't mind I made your posts into this one in the Introduction section.

Keep following your feelings and write down everything. If you're going through a period when you're feeling lots of different things everyday... well I think that's pretty normal. Just make a record of everything that you're thinking or feeling and don't worry too much for now about what it all means.

Welcome to the forum, TheLostOne! My name is Fibreya and I share this body with a whole host of other types of beings but I'm probably the one who you'll see pretty often.

Ocht, I wouldn't really use the Bible as a credible source of anything really. I'm Celtic but we have a Christian member in our system and her ideas and philosphies on things are odd. The idea that you thought of yourself as the Messiah seems off to me. I say, use it as a light reference, but use your own knowledge as well as other people's. I'm a Nephilim because my father was an angel but he wasn't fallen when he met my mother. Result was me!

Ousa was right to mention about petit mal seizures. We sometimes have them and they're not very nice. Best to get yourself checked out.