After asking a question on SO, an answerer and I got into a verbal tussle.

Basically, I at first misunderstood a part of the answer, but then felt that the answer wasn't clear enough to me. I felt that the argument was not clear to me, a beginner; the answerer, an expert, felt I was purposely misunderstanding him. An invitation to chat was rejected.

Eventually, a moderator seems to have stepped in and deleted all the comments.

However, I still don't understand that part of the answer, but I'm pretty sure that leaving another comment would result in another unconstructive argument. I'd really just like to understand the answer better.

@BillyONeal - Why is this a problem? 'Pissing matches' don't need to be preserved. One summary post from each (usually the first) will be sufficient to express both points of view.
–
Kevin VermeerNov 16 '11 at 0:04

@KevinVermeer I can see where he is coming from, because as it stands, those of us reading this post have no forensic evidence of what started the tangle in the conversation. Without that it's hard to give anything but broad advice. The other side of the coin is that one user summarizing the argument both puts him/her into a position of calling out the dissenter and creates a bias.
–
jonscaNov 16 '11 at 0:15

3

That's a good point, I definitely don't want this to be an "I'm right, he's wrong, tell me I'm great" discussion. It's more of an "I'm probably wrong, he's probably right, but it's not constructive, how do we make it useful?" kind of question.
–
Matt FenwickNov 16 '11 at 1:16

1

@KevinVermeer: Because if the answer is wrong, the only record that the answer was wrong is now gone. Of course if there's a summary post that's fine, but if all the comments got nuked that's bad.
–
Billy ONealNov 16 '11 at 2:06

@Matt - One whose side was the invitation to chat rejected? Chat is very helpful in sorting out comment arguments that are going nowhere.
–
xiaohouzi79Nov 16 '11 at 3:15

2 Answers
2

Just chill. Play some Solitaire, go get a beer, whatever. By the time you're done, you'll probably have calmed down and realized that fights on the internet are not worth taking personally. :)

Realize also, people don't have the same degree of communication skills. What some expert wrote is probably perfectly understandable to him as a Level 57 Java Master or whatever, but some people have trouble bringing it down to a newbie's level without condescending (or going too far and writing a whole book on how variables work). Asking them to clarify isn't asking too much, IMO, but some people just aren't able to deliver. In which case i just wouldn't upvote it. Wait til an answer comes along that answers the question at your level of understanding.

If the answer is utterly incomprehensible to you, you might downvote it. The arrow says, "This answer is unclear or not useful". Which seems to be your problem with the post. But refrain from "pissing matches"; they really don't help anyone, and as you've noticed, if they get too heated, a mod will step in and obliterate all the comments with extreme prejudice.

You should only ask practical, answerable questions based on actual problems that you face. Chatty, open-ended questions diminish the usefulness of our site and push other questions off the front page.

Your questions should be reasonably scoped. If you can imagine an entire book that answers your question, you’re asking too much.

Your question is open-ended in the extreme. It'd be good for a blog post, or maybe an entire series of blog posts, but not for a Q&A site such as SO. There's no way a single response could possible answer it completely.