Hosting them at his place, worse, subjecting his wife (she sounds very sweet, maybe too sweet for her own good) and daughters to them, while you had warned him, was not the best judgement.

And his choice of entertainment for his "guests from hell"? He knew they had problems with alcohol - so, hey, why not take them to a winetasting place, and a hot air balloon ride afterwards? Sounds like a good plan to me - what could possibly go wrong??

I think he's developed better sense. I hope I have developed better sense.

I can report that he stuck to his word about never speaking to them again. And, he's done a lot of personal growth sense then, and his temper, I'm happy to report, seems to have calmed down (well, as much as one can tell over the phone, that is.) However, he's making a lot of the same decisions in other areas of his life and career, so some things have stayed the same.

His wife - my dear Sister-in-Law - yes, she is way too sweet for her own good. I cannot figure out how she's survived this long. I haven't figured out if she is extremely strong or extremely foolish, but she loves my brother. And absolutely, the judgment in subjecting the kids to that - after they were warned - yes, that's a frustrating lack of judgment. I'm happy to report that they seem fine, though. The older one, "Betsy" is in university, studying music theory with a minor in business, and the younger one, "Arlene," is graduating high school this year with honors and plans a career in biochemistry. I don't know how they got like that, with heads screwed on straight. It can't have come from my brother's side.

And taking them wine tasting, and then on a balloon ride....completely bone-headed. I feel sorry for the other passengers and cannot, for the life of me, believe BIL didn't get charged for their ruined fares. I guess that's another part that upset me at the time - cap obv wondered why I cared so much since I wasn't there...well, yeah, I DO care...and I was also freaking offended, since, HEY, I told you what happened...and you still thought it was a good idea to take them to a place that exclusively serves alcohol and then on a dangerous activity that under ideal conditions can still be very dangerous?? Gee...he must REALLY think I'm dishonest and would deliberately mislead him; that I'm so insecure that I would try to slander someone....I may be lots of things, and have my own terribly long list of imperfections, but seriously....specifically NOT slandering people is what I earned my professional degree in; Hence, the insult. Plus, the very avoidable drama.

I don't think it to be that odd. I can remember a lot of things that happened years ago as though they were yesterday because they did have an impact on me in one way or another. My long term memory is far better than my short term memory.

Logged

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Sorry, this occurred in 2006, it is now 2013 and you can remember the conversations word for word? I think it's time you put it behind you and moved on. Oh and avoid BIL.

It's a story that we asked for her to post. There's no need to be hostile about it. It sounds like she has done exactly that (avoiding BIL) since the incident at her house.

Thanks for posting the story, mrkitty!

I think that it is odd that she can recall a conversation that was relayed to her word for word and even include the gestures made, 6 years later.

My husband recounts stories with a similar degree of detail about people who died many years ago, because they are so infamous they get brought up whenever the family gathers in one place. Plus he has an incredible memory.

Well, I would suspect at the very least artistic license. It took 8 posts to tell a story about something she did not witness one minute of in person. So yes, I also think it's odd that she can remember hand gestures and exact language about something that she was not there for 6 years ago. I'm glad you're not really associating with BIL anymore Mr. Kitty.

Sorry, this occurred in 2006, it is now 2013 and you can remember the conversations word for word? I think it's time you put it behind you and moved on. Oh and avoid BIL.

It's a story that we asked for her to post. There's no need to be hostile about it. It sounds like she has done exactly that (avoiding BIL) since the incident at her house.

Thanks for posting the story, mrkitty!

I think that it is odd that she can recall a conversation that was relayed to her word for word and even include the gestures made, 6 years later.

My husband recounts stories with a similar degree of detail about people who died many years ago, because they are so infamous they get brought up whenever the family gathers in one place. Plus he has an incredible memory.

It could also be attributed to artistic license with the details.I sounds a bit like you're accusing Mrkitty of telling fibs.

I think that is much ruder than anything Captain Obvious posted. I'm sorry, I'm not saying the OP is telling fibs as you say, but it is rather unbelievable - especially where she was able to recall it all when she wasn't even there/so much time has passed. They say truth is stranger than fiction but a bit of healthy skepticism never hurt either.

Well, I would suspect at the very least artistic license. It took 8 posts to tell a story about something she did not witness one minute of in person. So yes, I also think it's odd that she can remember hand gestures and exact language about something that she was not there for 6 years ago. I'm glad you're not really associating with BIL anymore Mr. Kitty.

Not just focusing on you, but there have been a few posters suggesting that mrkitty shouldn't have posted/is hanging on too long etc..

It is worth mentioning that this story was referenced in another thread where mrkitty made mention of the story (and said that it was long and unpleasant and she wasn't actually present, but that she had heard the story from both sides) and numerous posters begged her to post.

So this story is "Here by Popular Demand!".

I thought I should mention that, because I agree that, as an isolated story it would be a bit odd to post, but it was specifically and repeatedly requested and related to the previous incident.

I think that is much ruder than anything Captain Obvious posted. I'm sorry, I'm not saying the OP is telling fibs as you say, but it is rather unbelievable - especially where she was able to recall it all when she wasn't even there/so much time has passed. They say truth is stranger than fiction but a bit of healthy skepticism never hurt either.

And now for Amava's stupid question of the day: "Why?"

Why is it important to know whether every detail in a story is the exact truth that happened? Skepticism is something best in place for things that actually matter. For example, if someone tries to sell you insurance, or if someone sollicits your donations. In other words, when someone is telling you something that really has an impact on your life.

What impact does a story we read on the internet have on our lives? Some people might say "to not waste emotion or sympathy on something that isn't true", well, certainly, that can be the case if someone tells a story that is published as being currently going on. If this story would be happening now, and some posters would start getting distressed about getting the daughters out of danger, yes, then it would be important whether everything was true.

But we don't /have/ anything that could distress us here, as readers. We don't have to worry about the daughters or the sweet SiL, because it has already been stated that the BiL no longer is in a position to harm them, or have any impact on their lives whatsoever.

So think about it. Does it matter whether every hand gesture, every crass action, as described in the story, really happened that way? Or does it just make for a good entertaining read?

As for remembering a story vividly, and describing every conversation and hand gesture: I could tell stories like this that happened before I was born, with protagonists who were /dead/ before I was born. Why? How? Because in some families, stories tend to be told and retold, over and over again. They start living a life of their own, and I have heard them so often (and probably filled in some blanks in my own head about them) that I tell them as if I were there. Funny stories, tragic stories, appalling stories and amusing stories.

Just a few days ago, I caught myself actually demonstrating physically how a certain child in my family had behaved in a certain situation, while I was relaying the story to my husband. What child, you ask? A child who was 60 years old when I was born!

I think that is much ruder than anything Captain Obvious posted. I'm sorry, I'm not saying the OP is telling fibs as you say, but it is rather unbelievable - especially where she was able to recall it all when she wasn't even there/so much time has passed. They say truth is stranger than fiction but a bit of healthy skepticism never hurt either.

I don't see much difference between 'you're lying' and 'your story is rather unbelievable'. In this particular thread I don't think it matters all that much either. As Amava said, there is no current etiquette issue. Plus the story was posted in an off topic forum, at the request of several other posters.

Honestly, if you feel mrkitty was trolling or embellishing beyond an acceptable level, could you (general you) please report it to a mod instead of derailing the discussion?