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Thursday, October 10, 2013

Ducks and More

Today we have a guest post from the amazing Amy L. Peterson! It's about ducks...

not the Will Herondale type of duck but the actual legitimate duck. Glory. Glory. Glory.

If you're interested already, follow her Twitter here or visit her website here.

Now, without further ado, here we are:

Something
Furry Underfoot
is my humorous, touching memoir about raising a whole bunch of pets my husband
kept bringing home and how ended up caring for and falling for all of them. It
includes 50 tips, some of which are about pets, some of which are about the
spouses that love pets. For example,
consider Tip #4 8: Even fish can be
stressful. In my book, you’ll read how we went from one aquarium to three
aquariums just because our discus fish didn’t all get along.

Something
Furry Underfoot
is available as a paperback and an e-book on Amazon.com, and as an e-book in numerous
e-formats at Smashwords.com. If you just make your way to Amylpeterson.com/MyBooks, you’ll find all of my books,
plus photos of most of the pets in Something
Furry Underfoot. Some proceeds of
all of my animal books will benefit animal rescue organizations.

Below is an excerpt from Something Furry Underfoot, from Chapter
7, Bumpkin. You’ll benefit in knowing that Nicole was a student where I worked
at the state of Michigan; she’d informed me she’d found a domestic duckling
wandering around a yard in East Lansing.
I’d agreed to provide the duckling a home.

On April 17, 2007, at around
3:00 p.m., Nicole approached me at work with a large shoebox, the contents of
which was peeping. Word had gotten out that I was taking possession of a
duckling, so with my new charge in hand and a half dozen co-workers gathered
`round, I lifted one corner of the lid. Before I could see inside, the creature
pushed upward on the lid of the box, and within seconds, we were face to face
with a bright yellow duckling with orange feet and an orange bill. I heard
several people say, “Oh, how cute.” One person asked, “What are you going to do
with it?” but all I could do is wonder, “What
kind of duck is this?” My next thought was that the little duckling would
jump out of the box, so I had no choice but to replace the lid and carry my
peeping charge out of the building and to my car.

Because the height of the box was
only half the height of the duckling, I couldn’t bear to keep the duckling
inside the box if I didn’t have to. Once I was seated inside my car and the
door closed, I lifted the lid, took the duckling in my left hand and held it
against my chest. It blinked, looked around, but made no attempt to wiggle or
get away. So, using one hand to hold my duckling and the other to drive, we
made our way the 10 miles home. The duckling never did wiggle; it was as if
sitting on my chest was his or her preferred method of travel.

As we drove through the streets
of Lansing, East Lansing and into Haslett, I was amazed by the heat coming off
its little feet. Duck feet look rubbery, so I wasn’t expecting them to warm my
chest. And when we took the turn into my neighborhood and I held the duckling
close to my face, I wasn’t expecting its beak to be warm, too.

Once safely home, I carried the
duckling inside where we were greeted by two curious dogs and one meowing
kitten. The duckling blinked and peeped once in response. I told the three
curious fuzzies that this was our new pal, and they would have to get used to
it being around.

I carried the duckling down to
the bathroom and placed her in a cardboard box I had retrieved from the local
grocery store the day before. The box was lined with newspapers and soft
towels, the former to throw out each day, the latter because a nest would
likely have been soft and fuzzy, or at least not hard, I was thinking, and,
well, okay, it was totally irrational to put towels in there, but I did anyway.

Above the box was a trouble
light, which provided the primary source of warmth for the little duckling. The
proper height of the light was very important—if it was too close to the bottom
of the box, the duckling would bake; too far away and it wouldn’t be able to
stay warm enough. What constituted too far and too close was completely beyond
me and I had to trust that Mark would adjust it based on the fact that he had
not baked any of his baby turkeys.

Everything looked to be in
order, less the matter of food, and I was contemplating my next move when Mark
appeared. Looking at the duckling he remarked, “Oh my, what a cutie. Do you
know what kind?”

“I haven’t a clue.”

We stood
there and stared at the duckling, who stared back at us, blinking every now and
again. Finally, it peeped. Mark began talking to it, introducing himself and
telling the duckling it had fallen into good hands. He picked it up and the
duckling stopped peeping. As he was babbling on to the happy little duckling I
asked, “So, uh, what do baby ducks eat?”

“Duck starter,” he said, and he
turned as if snapping out a trance. “They’ll have it at Soldan’s.”

Since Mark had immediately
assumed the role of the alpha male duck, I assumed the role of the alpha female
duck, meaning, while he took up vigilance of the duckling, I found myself
driving the fifteen minutes or so to a pet store in search of something I
didn’t know existed. As I drove, I had plenty of time to ponder why anyone had
named the substance I was looking for “duck starter.” The word “food” worked
for just about every other species of animal, and the duckling I was going to
feed had already started out in life without the substance I was looking for,
so what I really needed was “duck keep growing.” On the other hand, I pondered,
why isn’t human baby food called “kid starter”?

After wondering if anyone else
has these types of issues, I asked the Soldan’s staff if they had duck starter.
I was directed to the back corner of the store where, sure enough, there were
five and ten pound bags of this pulverized pale tan-looking stuff labeled so
that even I could determine what it was. The store also had turkey starter,
which is probably how Mark’s turkeys had started out and why Mark knew duck
starter existed.

After I
found the duck starter, I wondered what other things I might find in the store
for ducks, so I wandered up and down the aisles looking for duck grower, duck
finisher, duck preening supplies, duck bathing gels, something else for ducks.
I found row after row of stuffed toys and bones and food and kitty litter and
even horse supplies, but nothing for ducks. To be sure I hadn’t missed
something, I asked the clerk at the desk. She was a long-haired brunette with a
narrow, horse-like face, a neck like a Rottweiler and a rear end like a hippo.

“Do we have what?”

“Anything for ducks besides duck
starter?”

“Like—?” she asked, turning her
mane sideways and snorting like a piglet.

“Like, you
have all these squeaky toys and beds and bones and everything for dogs, so,
what do you have for ducks?”

“Ducks only need food and water
and to be kept safe and warm,” she said, waving a fat panda-like claw.

“And ducks are different than
dogs, then, in what way?”

“Dogs are
fuzzy and loyal; ducks are feathery and messy?” she asked, her face wrinkled like
a perplexed monkey.

“And that explains why you don’t have anything else for them
besides duck starter?”

“I guess.”

As I drove home with my little
bag of food, I couldn’t help but count the number of stuffed toys we’d given to
my childhood dogs, Candy and Ashley—God rest their souls—the plush beds they
didn’t use because they’d slept with me, and the rawhide bones that once
littered our house. How ridiculously spoiled our beagle and cocker spaniel had
been, since all they needed was food and water, safety and warmth. And of
course, we’d taken spoiling to a new level with Dusty and Little Dipper.

But rather than pondering the
hundreds of dollars wasted on dogs, as I pulled into the driveway with my first
of what would be many bags of duck starter, I came to appreciate ducks for
their simple needs.

“Have any problems?” Mark asked.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor while the duckling was running about,
pecking at the newspaper.

“Walked right to it,” I smiled.

After
tucking the duckling in the box, Mark took the bag and sprinkled some of the
powdery stuff on top of the water bowl. This created a circular pattern of
spinning tan speckles.

“That’s fascinating,” I said. I
turned my attention to the duckling, who was also watching the water spin
around.

“See, ducks are attracted to
things that move,” Mark explained. “In the real world, it’s stuff like bugs and
worms. But here, when powdery food is placed on water, it creates movement. The
duckling will peck at it, realize its edible, and in no time, start eating the
Purina duck starter.”

I raised a skeptical eyebrow and
waited for Mark to stop adding duck starter to the water, for the water to
almost stop moving. I was about to sneer when the duckling stepped up to the
bowl, dipped his head in the bowl, mucked up his beak and began to eat. And
while it ate, it peeped. It was the cutest thing to hear a duck happily peeping
away while eating. At times, it peeped with its head in the food-water mixture
and made bubbles.

Convinced that the little
duckling would survive we named her Bumpkin.

Read more about Bumpkin in Something Furry Underfoot and also Bumpkin Gets Big, a rhyming photo e-book about Bumpkin for
kids. Just go to Amylpeterson.com/MyBooks.