Outlaw Way 130109 (The Toothpaste Conundrum)

Every one in commercials brushes their teeth so daintily, it almost looks like they’re just rubbing the toothbrush on their teeth with no foam at all. Are they even using toothpaste? For all of my life I’ve been brushing my teeth the same way, you put the toothpaste on, run it under some water, and attack your teeth like they don’t belong. The result, mouth foam, like “Old Yeller” style mouth foam, rabid animal, running down your hand foam. Recently I’ve become incredibly salient to the fact that when I brush my teeth I do not look like anyone in any movie, or commercial, ever. You’d think along the way someone would accurately depict what it looks like to brush ones teeth. Which further begs the question, am I just doing it wrong? Is there a better way that keeps me from looking like a rabid animal when I go to clean my bicuspids? Obviously I have no answer to this, I ask you my gentle readers, how foamy does your mouth get?

After reading carb backloading and finding yet another source that says coffee and MCT oil is the nectar of gods and drinking it will elevate you to superhero status I’ve begun adding it to my daily routine. The basics of it are that the caffeine and medium chain triglyceride combo keep the morning ketogenic state intact longer and more potently than fasting alone in addition to providing excellent amounts of energy. I’ve noticed the latter profoundly – perhaps placebo affect or simply the larger amount of coffee I’m now consuming. I shall continue this until I deem it unnecessary or damaging, but given the amount of research stating the opposite, invest in coconut oil ASAP.

I started reading “Olympic Weightlifting: The Complete Guide for Coaches and Athletes” by Greg Everett this morning, already in the first 10 pages entitled foundations or something like that I’ve learned a lot, I’m actually embarrassed by how much I’ve learnt because it means I’ve just been that ignorant for this long. There is a lot I did not necessarily need to know, like why catching snatches with toes forward or feet excessively bad will eventually ruin your knees. I knew it was bad, that’s all I really needed to know, but now I know exactly why. I suppose these are good. It’s a long book and very dense, I don’t expect to get through it quickly, but by the end I expect to be a god damn expert.

I dislike push jerks very strongly. The re-dip just does not feel like a stable position for me, my shoulders hurt, my ankles feel week, its just bad. I suppose it’s good that we’ve been working on it so much but at the same time I’d feel much more comfortable cleaning 20# more and split jerking it. The first 4 minutes or so went pretty smoothly, the last 3 reps or so was where it really got challenging, especially that hang squat clean. Ugh. The strength work I really do enjoy as I’ve said previously, I like the slower pace, it reminds me of my frat workout days, benching and curling. My focus on the snatch pulls was to achieve the same torso angle at the bottom as is required at the top, I’m getting closer but not quite there yet. The rows were inconsequential. The split presses I also enjoy but started a bit heavy, my elbows I think were still revolting from the push press yesterday and then the push jerks today, so the 135# I started with had to drop to 115# after 2 sets. The conditioning work was interesting, you’d think, “Oh 150m repeats, how bad could this be, and the first one or two you fly through in 24s, 25s, having some good rest time, but then the hamstrings tighten, that acceleration is slower, and they really start wearing you down. That last one was not only slow, but very labored.

Today is the first day of my Progenex experiment. It’s the most expensive protein product I’ve ever put in a shaker, or my mouth. It’s far too early to say if it’s worth it, but given all I’ve read, I’d be remiss if I didn’t at least give it it’s day. At 30 servings, working out 5 days a week, I figure that’s 6 weeks to assess, which should be more than plenty. First impressions, I expected it to taste a little better, the hydrolyzed whey still retains a surprising amount of its bitterness which is not fully masked by the natural Cocoa flavor. Also, the “More Muscle” bag would not reseal for me…perhaps I’m just a big dumb caveman or maybe it’s really that hard, no clue.

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4 Comments

Hey Dan, I’ve been on the coffee + coconut oil bandwagon for a bit and I’ve got to say I love it. Talk about some energy and if I’m correct, MCFAs (such as coconut oil) are able to cross the blood-brain barrier with little to no insulin.

Sprinkle just a little sea salt on your coconut oil … I think it tastes much better that way. Good post!

1- I make a pretty mean fumanchu when I brush my teeth…its fantastic.
2- I just ordered that olympic lifting book. Thanks for convincing me to spend $34 lol
3- I couldn’t close it either…the locky teeth thingies just wont match up 🙁

I knew there was a reason we’re friends, awesome – I’m not alone! No problem, if you’re going to compete, the time has come to suck it up and be good at weightlifting. Thank you! I got mine closed this morning but it took a Vulcan death pinch, seriously my fingers hurt. I need more coffee

About Me

I'm Dan - holy balls that's a scary looking mug! I'm a equal parts goofy and intense, it's a ying-yang thing. I do CrossFit 7 days a week, eat mostly paleo, love my workout jams and won't apologize for any of it. My goal is to give back to these communities as much if not more than I've taken from them. Come in and stay awhile - I'm happy to have you.