Colonel Parker Schenecker was deployed with the Army in Qatar when he got the unthinkable news: his children – Calyx, 16, and Beau, 13 – had been shot to death, allegedly at the hands of their mother, Julie.

Since the shootings, Schenecker has struggled to move forward from the tragedy.

He also has not given any interviews about the crime, but agreed to talk with PEOPLE as a way to honor his children and to set the record straight. Sitting in the living room of his home, just a few feet from where his children were found, Parker Schenecker, 48, explains how Julie's depression led to the unthinkable crime.

"We were a typical American family," he says, "but we had a sick member."

Since the shooting deaths of his teens, Calyx and Beau, Parker Schenecker has focused on celebrating their lives.

Now, he has taken the next step of confronting his wife, Julie, who is accused of killing their son and daughter in their Florida home.

"Today I met with my wife Julie for the first time since I returned from my duty overseas," Parker Schenecker, 48, said in a statement Friday. "The meeting was both emotional and productive. We discussed numerous topics but focused mostly on how so many people continue to honor and remember the lives of Calyx and Beau.