Sad Glenn Beck Sheds Tears Yearning for the Way Things Used to be

Ha! One of the great things about not working at a place I used to work is not having to watch Glenn Beck’s daily clown show on Fox News. Shit drove me downright crazy, as it would most people who aren’t already crazy. But occasionally I will sneak a peak at clips of his show on YouTube mainly for laffs and to remind myself just why I fled the Republican party like a naked Republican congressman flees a gay bathhouse during a police raid.

So I was digging around YouTube this morning and discovered that Beck served up one helluva doozy of a clip on his show last night. Remember the 50s, 60s and 70s, that time when there was no conflict in the world, racial strife didn’t exist and women and people with dark skin knew their place and didn’t huff and puff about being equal to white folk with cocks? Glenn Becks does, and he so desperately wants those days to return!

So here’s Beck playing that Coca-Cola commercial with the kid and Mean Joe Greene along with a Kodak commercial flashing images of happy white families from a bygone era, which causes him to break down into tears, and he then goes on to metaphorically explain how America sucks right now because we messed up and jumped in a car and went to a party with a black guy and now we’re drunk and high on weed and will probably be raped before the end of the night, you know, the usual stuff that happens when you associate with black people. And then Beck breaks down again because Obama has turned America into a communist ghetto. The end.

Ah the good ole days! Why can’t you people just have a Coke and a smile and shut the fuck up?!?!