Oh hey Calgary. How’s things? It’s just Wanye - your friendly neighbour to the North. Just thought we’d pop in with a few friends to talk about the ice hockey match this evening.

Things aren’t as dire up here in Edmonton as seasons of XXth, 30th, 30th and 29th would suggest. Yeah we know you are better than us on paper. You have an all world goalie capable of winning you any game he decides. We have a worn out old Russian and some 9 foot something or other backing him up.

PROOF MEET PUDDING

We know that you have been to the playoffs X times since 2006 and all we have been getting up here is our collective asses handed to us. We know we aren’t even close to you in the standings.

We know that the cumulative 5 year record of our respective teams is:

We know all sorts of facts.

Having said all of that:

WE WOULD RATHER BE US THAN YOU

That’s right. The Oilers are coming out of an extended dark age and yours are only beginning now. And you know it too – don’t even pretend you can’t see four or five years of basement dwelling on the horizon ahead of you. Look how old you are! And the no trade clauses! Tsk tsk tsk. It boggles the mind!

Had any UFA or RFA of note chosen the Edmonton Oilers in the past 10 years we might be in a similar pickle. But guess what. They didn’t. And the garbage that we were able to sign are almost all off the books. Then you know what happens? That’s when the winning starts.

Now sure that might be tomorrow and not today. We know that you are surging ETC ETC ETC and hope to put a playoff berth firmly in your sights tonight. And we know that this ain’t exactly the best Oilers squadron of the past 3

There are many areas the Oilers can whip the Calgary Flames at and this includes:

SEXIER BRASS

Sutter v Renney? Are we kidding here? Not to mention that the corpse of Tambellini could be left in the sun for a week and be more attractive in a bathing suit than Jay Feaster. No no, this isn't even a contest between the two franchises.

MORE RYANS

Compare the rosters

MORE SQUEEE

Something something

MORE NUGE

Something something

AND SO

In closing here are some more incendiary quotes from OilersNation via twitter:

@bcherri01 This one is for first dibs on tee times #battleofalberta

@JSBMrevolution Time to show the world who the REAL best cousin kissers are #Wait #battleofalberta

@MyqWilson “Who wins BOA? Jay Feaster asks for the question to be rephrased in the form of a cheeseburger*

You are the worst monsters in human history. We look forward to watching you miss the playoffs.

Signed,

A team out of the playoffs for XX consecutive months

PS Even at the end of the article we would STILL rather be us than you.

Blog so hard motherf**ckers try and find me.
Tweet me @wanyegretz provided it is about Jordan Eberle or babes. Find me on instagram for photos of donairs.

Sorry to offend. Haha. The one post was not me in my defense. Just a little ribbing towards the city and team that I hate. Seems to be keeping with the spirit of the thread. Good luck cheering for two out of the three bottom teams in the league!!! You are a veritable rabbits foot.

You're right, I see no trouble trading a 36 year old goalie(at start of next season) with two years left at 5.8 mil.

It might be a tough decision but I'd consider moving him for Columbus' first round pick.

The Flames actually have some good post-Kipper goalie prospects. Irving (one of the Flames draft picks BTW) has been good in all of the games he's played in except that Boston massacre, but Kipper (and the rest of the team) did some sucking that night too. The Oilers will have their chance to test him tonight. Feaster also managed to pick up a very good KHL goalie (Karri Ramo), so there's another likely NHL-ready starter if Irving falls off a cliff. Calgary could trade Kipper and still get quality goal-tending.

Actually, to be fair, Khabibulin and Dubnyk are both performing at nearly the league average save % (0.910 and 0.911 vs 0.914). So you guys aren't getting bad goal-tending really. Just slightly below average at worst.

Small Lebowski, maybe you should take your lame-ass smack act to the Jim Rome show. They appreciate windbag clones like you who like to listen to themselves talk. It's a good thing you live in a city where half the population gets paid to sit on their asses checking their stock portfolios all day long, writing overly long "hilarious" monologues or pondering new ways to embezzle your boss so you can pay for your girlfriend's boob job.

the flames have had almost no chances in this game. they are fortunate to only be down two and all with hall out. iginla and baertchi must have set a record by now with how many times they've had their pockets picked.

1)Flames fans have a SERIOUS inferiority complex comparable to "little man syndrome." Eerily similar to Toronto's "center of the universe" complex.

2)Flames fans have some strange obsession with cousins that have relations with each other.

3)Flames fans use the word "retarded" to describe anything not Calgary related.

4)Calgary is losing this game handily, and is another step closer to missing the playoffs.

5)Oilers fans have seen The Flames movie before. We know how it ends. Trying to hang on, catch 8th place and pray that anything can happen in the playoffs. Been there. Done that. Bought the t-shirt. Mine says "Grier"

1)Flames fans have a SERIOUS inferiority complex comparable to "little man syndrome." Eerily similar to Toronto's "center of the universe" complex.

2)Flames fans have some strange obsession with cousins that have relations with each other.

3)Flames fans use the word "retarded" to describe anything not Calgary related.

4)Calgary is losing this game handily, and is another step closer to missing the playoffs.

5)Oilers fans have seen The Flames movie before. We know how it ends. Trying to hang on, catch 8th place and pray that anything can happen in the playoffs. Been there. Done that. Bought the t-shirt. Mine says "Grier"

So true the oilers used to be in that boat, and you know what? It sunk.

1)Flames fans have a SERIOUS inferiority complex comparable to "little man syndrome." Eerily similar to Toronto's "center of the universe" complex.

2)Flames fans have some strange obsession with cousins that have relations with each other.

3)Flames fans use the word "retarded" to describe anything not Calgary related.

4)Calgary is losing this game handily, and is another step closer to missing the playoffs.

5)Oilers fans have seen The Flames movie before. We know how it ends. Trying to hang on, catch 8th place and pray that anything can happen in the playoffs. Been there. Done that. Bought the t-shirt. Mine says "Grier"

Ebs, Nuge and Dubey, great game boys. Suck it flames. Eat sh!t flamers fans, onto another playoffs miss and a worse draft pick than us. Guaranteed loserboy VF has nothin to say. Flamers 5 years behind us in the rebuild LOL

This article was posted to both sites, ON and FN. So Wayne trolled first!

You Oilers fan have enjoyed watching your team lose 60% of the time and haven't watched meaningful hockey since November.

I'd much rather watch a team that A) played meaningful hockey in the second half of the season and B) had a chance to win more than 1 out of every three games.

So you keep enjoying the fact that tomorrrow, when there is world peace and no world hunger and everyone is sitting around a campfire singing Kumbaya, your Oilers will have a chance to make it to the playoffs.

Until that day, I'll stick with the team that actually wins games.

Oilers fans... EAT SH!T!

I'd rather watch a team that can score a pretty goal once in a while. If I had to watch the Flames on a regular basis I'd become a soccer fan.

The only reason Sven was called up is because we already were playing with 7 of our AHLers and couldn't keep depleting our minor team... and we are still winning! What does that say about our future???!!!

it says you have been playing a lot of mediocre teams lately and the top of Kiprusof's head is flatter than your girlfriend.

The only reason Sven was called up is because we already were playing with 7 of our AHLers and couldn't keep depleting our minor team... and we are still winning! What does that say about our future???!!!

Maybe Sven should have brought some of his teammates with him. The Flames proved Feaster right tonight, without Kiprusoff they really are worse than a 30th place team.

GAME DAY PREDICTION: Flames get two goals each from Iggy and Sven and win 4-2.

OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Us Flames fans will go into a state of depression because this is Sven's last game.

NOT SO OBVIOUS GAME DAY PREDICTION: Jay Feaster in his post-game celebration accidentally trips Lee Stempniak and elbows Lance Bouma's shoulder in order to allow Sven to stay up with the club. When Stempniak is on the ground injured Hemsky walks by and trips over him, causing him to miss the rest of the season.

One could bring up how your mayor wants you to kick the Calgary habit. You know with the airport? Calgary is the hub, businesses know it, so do your own citizens.

Your downtown airport. It retarded the growth of your city. Look in your downtown, there are no new skyscrapers, no new development.

All the power has been transferred to Calgary. Why? We have all the money. We're growing while you're shrinking. You see, people, especially young people, are leaving Edmonton in droves. A lot are coming to Calgary. Why? It's better here, in every way.

Edmonton's getting older, no one is moving there. Soon your tax revenue will shrink so much that the governments funds that make up all your new developments will dry up. It won't be justified to spend tax dollars there. We have money here. The development gap is obvious. Look out the window.

Speaking of tax dollars, your new rink is raping your city up the a$$ (but you guys love it up the a$$). Katz is just preying on your existential fear of losing the Oilers. He puts some up front cash up but threatens your city council. They bend over for him and he sucks all the money in this whole deal. It all goes to Rexall's benefit. Sure some bars will make money but the real cash leaves town just like him. This is the only investment in Edmonton worth anything and he's gonna take all the cash and ship it out to Palm Springs or someplace else with a future. You're all just letting it happen because there's no one else.

You can come down to Calgary. You're all more than welcome. We got lots of people moving here and they can cheer for whoever they want. The educated are coming here, settling here, investing here. We are exponentially growing the gap past you. In many ways you don't matter. You're irrelevant. We don't care if you come here, we're too busy living great lives. We don't hate like you do. We're not envious like you are. We'd love to share the good times here with you. Think of all the people you know who've already made the move. They ain't looking back.

Edmonton has just declined past the point of return. You're climbing up a mountain of sand, you wave your arms but you're just sinking further back.

You know, teams win and lose. No big deal. We just got so much more to look forward to here. Our lives are fuller, richer. Highway 2 North is the road to nowhere.

All I'm doing is pointing at the writing on the wall. Do whatever you want with it. I could care less.

Wow. Just getting back from the game. Excellent game and result. Gotta keep my eye on that Eberle guy, he might be OK.

Hey little fella you had a big day. Spouted off your non-sensical babble. Got schooled on the boards. Made a fool of yourself and watched Flames stink it up.

Time to put on the Little Lebowski Flaming C jammies and head for Ma's basement. Curl into fetal postion and repeat, Today never happened. Today never happened.

Oh.. and by the way there Jeff LeBlowMe... maybe you should go to Etown once in awhile. I don't live there myself (not in the Calgary Cowpie hole either mind you) and even I know downtown Etown has new sky scrapers going up. Seriously.. you must pretty insecure with yourself to make comments about something you know jack-crap about.. clearly it shows...

As stated... back to your fetal position.. we feel for you cheering for a team with no hope or future...

Let me know when you guys *cough, cough*, win a Stanley Cup. Better yet, call me when you make the playoffs. Oh wait a minute, call me when you are a .500 team.

So you have 3 top forwards, it still wasn't enough to carry your team. You don't have a goalie, you don't have any d-men.

Just because Chicago and Pittsburgh won Stanley Cups doesn't mean your team will. Pittsburgh balanced their drafting by taking a goalie(Fleury) and a d-man(Letang). While Chicago may not have top goalie, they still have Keith/Seabrook/Kane/Toews. Again, balance, it can't all be one-sided.

Look at the Islanders, what's that? Yes, the Islanders with all their draft picks. Still can't make the playoffs or reach .500. Why? No goalie and terrible d. Sound familiar?

Let me know when you guys *cough, cough*, win a Stanley Cup. Better yet, call me when you make the playoffs. Oh wait a minute, call me when you are a .500 team.

So you have 3 top forwards, it still wasn't enough to carry your team. You don't have a goalie, you don't have any d-men.

Just because Chicago and Pittsburgh won Stanley Cups doesn't mean your team will. Pittsburgh balanced their drafting by taking a goalie(Fleury) and a d-man(Letang). While Chicago may not have top goalie, they still have Keith/Seabrook/Kane/Toews. Again, balance, it can't all be one-sided.

Look at the Islanders, what's that? Yes, the Islanders with all their draft picks. Still can't make the playoffs or reach .500. Why? No goalie and terrible d. Sound familiar?

Good well thought out argument and I am serious when I say that. Because the organization has not yet adressed those issues. But I am way more comfortable about the direction of the Oilers than the Flames.

I will pose a straightforward question to you which I would like an honest answer to. Which team will have a better overall record over the next three years and will it be close?

Let me know when you guys *cough, cough*, win a Stanley Cup. Better yet, call me when you make the playoffs. Oh wait a minute, call me when you are a .500 team.

So you have 3 top forwards, it still wasn't enough to carry your team. You don't have a goalie, you don't have any d-men.

Just because Chicago and Pittsburgh won Stanley Cups doesn't mean your team will. Pittsburgh balanced their drafting by taking a goalie(Fleury) and a d-man(Letang). While Chicago may not have top goalie, they still have Keith/Seabrook/Kane/Toews. Again, balance, it can't all be one-sided.

Look at the Islanders, what's that? Yes, the Islanders with all their draft picks. Still can't make the playoffs or reach .500. Why? No goalie and terrible d. Sound familiar?

Letang was drafted in the second round or something like that, same with keith. Those two were not drafted high so really the oilers could have dmen just like that in their minor league system right now. Also Petry is developing nicely and did not let Iginla or anybody on calgary get any good chances yesterday. The oilers need a goalie, they need a top dman, and maybe another dman, give the oilers just one or two of those players and they are in really good shape. I cannot say the same about the flames, I am sorry but they are falling off a cliff.

Hey dumbass... Still talking out both sides of your ass I see. Great. This is the giy who claimed skewing when he was in fact the one talkin BS and changing the context of the convo.

For all u tools that think edmonton is dead think again. Actually more n more buisnesses are moving away from calgary. Capital powe closed it's offices as well as a few other major buisnesses, call centers, etc

Your mayor is spouting muslim propaganda as well... How that workin out for you?

You.guys wanna be toronto so bad you had to erect a giant peni$ in the air like a little jealous brother from your surrounding trailer parks.

Also why does your dt smell like horse crap or yeast year round? Suck losers u have to bitch about others to make urself feel better.