I would like to call to order this meeting of the fellow Mean Mothers of America (MMoA). Our first order of business will be to erect a statue (chocolate, of course) to Mark Zuckerberg, Founder of the social networking site, Facebook.

I am not "the outdoor type." I made clear early on that Mr. Wonderful, an avid athlete and outdoorsman, had made a poor choice in mates. He did not marry anyone even remotely "self-sufficient" or "outdoorsy."

The graduate. She has deep blue eyes, a gorgeous smile, and her senior class superlative is “prettiest hair.” That makes sense. She does have the prettiest hair. It’s a gorgeous shade of deep, natural red. This was true even when she was mostly bald and later, briefly, when it all sort of fluffed around her head like a vibrant dandelion puff.