Long Day Stress Rant.

So, have you ever had one of those days where everything starts out well, and you're all nice and happy, and then before you even realize anything has happened, the world falls to bits? well, if you haven't, you are very blessed. And if you have, I hope you don't have any more.

Today was designated as "paint Emily's room" day, by my mother. My room was supposed to be painted four months ago. It shouldn't surprise some of you that my room is a very cautiously organized system of things and odd placements. No one else in the world understands my placement of things, but, it works for me. Immediately, my mother rips my organization to shreds. My blood pressure has shot through the roof, since everytime she finds a piece of my writing she starts to read it aloud in a very baby-ish tone of voice, which leads to me ripping the paper out of her hands and getting very, very defensive.

The thing about my organizational system is that it's been in place for many years. (i.e. during all of the "ethan" years) So, you can imagine what came up. First to show itself, was the Ethan box. Where I put all my my Ethan-related stuff in. Second, was a love letter. And, as I read over it, I nearly cried. Third, was a stuffed animal he bought me a LONG time ago. When he bought it (err, well, when we got home and actually took a moment to breathe ) he told me to put it somewhere up high and could see everything, to remind me that someone was always watching over me. Corny, I know, but at the time, it was sweet.

And the last thing to show itself was a scrapbook. My 11th birthday party, horrible hair (a red affro. no joke. my hairstylist was a dumbass.), but it really got me thinking about Ethan. I mean, there had to have been at least eight pictures of the boy on the page. It did that weird thing where I actually missed him, for some stupid reason.

Now. I sit here, well aware that I succuumbed (sp?) to the temptation and texted Ethan, showing him the photograph. I am an idiot.