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Monday, November 1, 2010

Monday, November 1, 2010

The following are paid political advertisements by the candidates for East Paulsbo Bakery Oversight Commissioner, and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Cake Wrecks or its affiliates.

Friends, when you go to vote tomorrow, consider this: do you want someone loyal, trustworthy, and true overseeing your county bakeries?

"These glasses show I'm smart AND intelligent."

Someone with a firm grip on his patriotism?

"They call me...Blue Steele."

OR....do you want Gretchen Schankhausen?

[Pyscho music]

Ernie Snerdbergler: "I'm Ernie Snerdbergler, and I speak for you, the American people. I stand against plastic flotsam and terrorism. Unlike my opponent, Gretchen Shankhoosier, who I hear speaks French.

Just look at this video clip of Ernie Snerdbergler playing catch with children on a playground, surrounded by more children, who clearly adore him, and also kittens. Lots and lots of kittens. Clearly, he is the only *safe* choice for your county bakery commissioner.

And the end of campaigning cannot come soon enough, as I'm pretty sure that watching or reading political ads actually makes me dumber with each new claim. Thanks for a great post! I especially like the creepy baby cupcakes around the pregnant belly. Nothing like an allusion to cannibalism to celebrate a new life!

Wow. I've been reading this for a while and this has to be the funniest one yet. You take the cake (pun, ah, intended) for getting the satire exactly right but so over the top (and completely filled with humorous asides. And cake, of course) it's bearable. Because nobody likes an actual political ad.

Reading, laughing, smiling, and then RECOILING IN HORROR at those baby cupcakes! Augh! What kind of person with eyeballs that work would pick up one of those things and happily bite into it?Ernie Snerdbergler, that's who.

Firm. Grip. On His. Patriotism!! I nearly died laughing there. And then I saw the last cake... How do you say "I want a baby cupcake!" without feeling weird? You're eating the whole baby. So many levels of wrong... Love it!

"Gretchen Schankhausen is a life-long baker, community activist, and volunteer frog neuterer...."

That's when I lost it! Glad I wasn't drinking anything at the time or I'd be wiping down my computer screen.

Love it!

But seriously, let's get out and vote tomorrow. We need leadership better than the mentality of these wreckerators. God help us, I hope there's still some smart and sane people still left in the world!

We have a sound clip where Gretchen Schankhausen says of the poor: "Let them eat cake." Now whether that's a snide remark against the poor or a rockin' awesome campaign promise is up to America to decide.

I live in Iowa...so while all of you might get a break from campaigning for awhile it will start up again for us in about 6 weeks for the 2012 elections (1st in the nation caucuses and all). Enjoy your break. *sigh* Thank you for the post though - LOL worthy!

The baby cupcakes -- Oy! Could we not have used picks? That way, the babies aren't consumed and no risk is run that some of them will look like frogs. This may be a first: a case where flotsam *should* have been used.

I will be soooo glad when this campaign is over. I can stop the calls asking me if "So and So" can count on my vote. In Oregon we vote by mail, so I voted well over a week ago. I am still getting calls, even though my ballot is turned in, and I couldn't change my vote if I wanted.

Anyway, I love these political commercials, maybe by nest election season we will see real "cake" commercials

Ontario's municipal elections were over last week, so thankfully this is no longer our reality. Except for when we watch US television channels... we get the ads and so yell at our TVs, but don't get to vote! Minor technicality of being a foreign country ;)

Love this post-- you got the opponent bashing with no useful platform information down perfectly! (it's getting harder and harder to be an informed voter ).

Firm grip on patriotism took a second glance to truly "get" the point. But oh, was it worth it!! All that was missing was the white stars above it (fireworks, of course LOL)

And that pregnant lady/baby cake... shudder. I don't know what about it was so horrible, but I think that's one of the worst you've posted (the meat baby from the other day being blotted from my mind). And, of course... babies too young to turn themselves over should be BACK TO SLEEP, to prevent SIDS, never placed face-down for a nap. Tummy time when awake is fine (There's your public health message of the day. Guess where I work?).

My 7 year old said, "I wouldn't want to eat their butts!" about the baby cake. I wholeheartedly agree! Also, my 4 year old saw the "angel" and asekd "What is that supposed to be?" I told her an angel. "That doesn't look like an angel." So true!

I made the baby eating comment yesterday morning (October 31) on the NPR Monkey See blog. Except it was Glenn Beck instead of Ernie S. I made the comment in response to a guy who kept making ridiculous statements & following them with 'It's a fact.' It was my attempt to show him that saying something is a fact, doesn't make it so.

Awesome post today! You always make me laugh. I vote for truth, justice, and kittens! The only way those horrific baby cakes could be worse would be if they followed the "back to sleep" advice. EPBOC ;-)

Wow... the bell has two clappers and 24 stars - I'd given it a pass if it'd had one and 25 respectfully (But if it's a CCC, please don't get mad at me - these guys at least have the stripes in the right colors for once).

If only the ads on the tv were this funny I wouldn't curse and change the channel lol. That last cake is scary beyond belief. And the um patriotism cake lmao... can't not laugh when my dirty mind takes over.

*12* babies??? Fun fact- with each male child a woman has, the odds of that son being gay increase by 33%, from a baseline of about 3% odds of being gay for the first son. It's called the older brother syndrome. No, I am not hating on the bald cake-man with the mesh top with boobie cutouts. You can wear what you want at a rave.

I'm way late on this post but it's hilarious! I love Jen. I love the stuff she writes. That's most of the reason this stuff is funny! *sigh* I don't vote for cannibals. Especially cannibals who eat babies! I want to be sneezed on by an angel in disguise! I vote for Van Hoosen!

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