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The Key To Effective Communicating

Category Archives: life

As horrific and unimaginable as this is, it is not uncommon in too many places globally… different methods in some cases but still the same outcome. It’s only shocking to those that are not aware that it happens. This hit a little closer to home for some and I believe that we’ll see more attacks like this in the future.

Why? Belief systems. Unfortunately, the answer to the worlds problems lie within those unable to see them…us.

I’ve heard a number of psychologists diagnose Ms. Arias with borderline personality and a few other clinical conditions. After seeing this letter, I came up with my own diagnosis.

First, pay attention to unnaturally neat this letter is – a sign of neurosis and calculation.

Next the letters lean left and right – a sign of teetering between Physical and Emotional behavior.

The writing size is small but her loops are large – this indicates Emotional Sexuality/ Physical Suggestibility.

The y’s are loop-less and dip down into the line below them – Emotional Sexual and confusion about her sexual behavior.

The large margin on the left and small margin to the right – indicate an individual who makes space for themselves and gives little room to others (self centered).

The overall writing size seems to be small – another Emotional indicator.

The letters in each word are all close together – indicating that she keeps her true feelings close to herself.

*note – Physical = Extrovert/Emotional = Introvert

I didn’t see any lines on the paper but if there are that makes the neatness standout even more so. Compare the first sample with the second. In the first one you can see a little of her emotions and disorganization. This would be closer to who she really is than the second one which seems to be carefully thought out and written. Her writing actually looks like she does literally, unemotional and unaffected. She appears to be intelligent, she seems to really calculate what she says well before she says it… this is a planner. I didn’t spend much time focusing on the content of the letter because it really doesn’t matter. All that a person thinks shows up in unconscious ways.

Now that we’ve identified our writer as an extreme Emotional Sexual/Physical Suggestible, what the heck does that mean? That means you’re dealing with a person that will take things the wrong way mostly, internalize how they feel about and will over-react to what they’ve taken wrong. The Emotional aspect of the behavior will cause an individual to constantly internalize their feelings only to completely explode later. It really doesn’t matter the label that we give this behavior, it’s more important to be able to identify it before it’s too late.

I’m constantly debated on the idea that you can’t put people into two categories and I’m here to tell you that you can. There are differing levels of these two behaviors in us all, however we tend to lean to one side more than the other. When a person’ s levels are about the same on each side (without knowing how to keep up this balance) it’s called the “borderline behavior” syndrome

In the end, everyone of us has the capacity to do the unthinkable; our better judgment simply helps to keep us out of most trouble. The message here is to learn yourself, learn your behavior and how you respond to stress, because stress is the financier of every news organization worldwide.

after leaving the hospital and getting settled back at home, the discussion of Postpartum depression came up. She noticed that she was over reacting to minor things and this wasn’t her usual behavior… so she says.

I began to try to make sense of this phenomena by first doing a little more research. Here’s one definition of the condition:

Postpartum depression (PPD), also called postnatal depression, is a type of clinical depression which can affect women, and less frequently men, typically after childbirth. Studies report prevalence rates among women from 5% to 25%, but methodological differences among the studies make the actual prevalence rate unclear. Among men, in particular new fathers, the incidence of postpartum depression has been estimated to be between 1% and 25.5%.[1] Postpartum depression occurs in women after they have carried a child. Symptoms include sadness, fatigue, changes in sleeping and eating patterns, reduced libido, crying episodes, anxiety, and irritability. Although a number of risk factors have been identified, the causes of PPD are not well understood. Many women recover with a treatment consisting of a support group or counseling.[2][3]

When I saw that the ‘cure’ for this condition was mostly counseling it all started to make a little more sense to me. After a woman has a child all of her senses become more heightened or intensified. This is an instinctual occurrence. If you believe that once upon a time there were no houses, roads bridges, iPads, internet, then the picture becomes more plain. The mother’s senses are heightened for protection of her infant, she sees, hears, feels, smells and even tastes more keenly. Well, that sounds a lot more promising to me than telling someone that they’re clinically depressed, especially when it’s true. Whatever we continually think on creates feelings and those feelings create more thoughts. So, to Keep It Simple Stupid, changing your thoughts changes your feelings.

Unfortunately, due to the lack of understanding of emotions and how they work, this blessing, in fact became labeled as depression. The depression aspect only shows up when someone can’t explain the feelings or the condition they find themselves in, just had a baby or not. I call it a blessing because once they’re understood, these heightened emotions can be put to positive use, for things like going to a botanical garden and seeing what all sorts of flowers truly smell like. Go to a new restaurant and taste new foods that you’ve never tried. Don’t feel like moving? Fine, use your heightened sense of emotion to write a song for your baby. I know all of this may sound corny but it sure beats being called depressed and drugged out of your mind on pills.

I believe that with understanding comes peace. If more women understood where these feelings were coming from and how to deal with them, we’d have less people diagnosed as being depressed. That is not to say that depression is not real and that people should just get over it. Depression is very real, but it can be avoided with proper education and re-labeling of some of these negative diagnostics.

So many issues and problems in our lives can be avoided by simply understanding how the mind and body works, most importantly, our own.

T. Scott

– Dehypnotize

[Disclaimer: This post in no way disputes or contradicts the instructions given by your Doctor or Therapist. Please continue to get counseling or therapy until you feel that you’ve overcome your unwanted state of mind.]

My postings about handwriting are not to turn anyone into an overnight graphologist…rather they are to bring attention to the amount of control our subconscious minds have over our everyday lives. Your handwriting will change over time and sometimes by the day, it’s all based on our current state. It’s important to understand how the subconscious mind operates, to proactively live your life as opposed to reacting to it. Too often we find ourselves in the midst of a situation asking,”How did I get here?” and “How do I get out of this one?”

Our subconscious minds run, arguably, around 90% of our daily operations. For example, have you ever been driving to a routine destination and once you get there you don’t remember the trip, or pass an exit while deep in thought about an issue? You were on auto-pilot, your subconscious was driving while you were off in wonderland. So how do we train our subconscious to aid in making our lives better? The same way we trained it to make our lives what they are now…repitition. Where we operate in our lives now is a direct result of what we’ve trained our minds to accept as ‘normal’. So, we are actually succesful in what we’ve conditioned and trained ourselves to be. So, if you’ve ever tried changing something about yourself but found that it just didn’t work, consider that 10% of your mind is fighting with the 90%…who do you think is going to win?

What does all of this have to do with handwriting? Our handwriting is merely a manifestation of our feelings on paper. It ultimately doesn’t matter what is written, you can tell how a person really feels by how they write. Because our handwriting is controlled by our subconscious we can consciously change our handwriting to affect changes in our behavior…I swear by this! No, it doesn’t happen overnight…it has to be exercised repeatedly. Each time you consciously remind yourself of why you’re writing differently it’s suggesting to your subconscious that it has to change… until it becomes automatic!

Here are some tips for change: (By the way Physical in my writings means extrovert and Emotional means introvert)

I would like to be more out going and extroverted (Want to be more of a Physical) : If your writing is small and leans to the left or straight up and down, write larger and lean your words more to the right. If your writing already fits this pattern, exaggerate it even more always keeping in mind why you’re doing it.

I would like to be less dramatic and take the time to think before I speak (Want to become more of an Emotional): Your writing is probably huge! Make a point to write smaller and sign your name smaller as well. Keeping in mind why you’re doing it each time.

I would like to feel more optimistic: When you write, slant all of your sentences upward…keeping in mind each time, why you’re doing it.

I am horrible with time management: Make sure that your margins on each side of the page are equally spaced…keeping in mind why you’re doing it each time.

I know there will be detractors to this concept as there were the last time, but I encourage you to try this if for no other reason…you’ve been trying everything else, why not try something different to get different results!

So, let me say that of course, of course, of course…this doesn’t solve all of your life’s problems, it may not even work for some people. Again my point here is to bring awareness to how we are reactive to life as opposed to proactive and this is what causes many of our life’s issues. You will encounter a lot less stress in your life approaching from this angle. It’s not that issues will not come to you…I promise they will but, isn’t driving a lot easier …now that you know how to drive?