Wednesday, September 5, 2012

So living life as an unmarried mother is really taking its toll on my head, and my heart. currently battling my ex for child support and dealing with his threats of physical harm at the same time him wanting my children that i put my entire soul into. I have had absolutely no ambition lately to keep up my home, or my current relationships. The man that is in my life, cant even begin to understand how the stress of the current events is effecting me. today my best friend, who knows how often i daydream of a wedding and marriage, asked me today if i really think that we will get married. we were at the park currently in an argument with my boyfriend over complete nonsense. He was on the playground playing with the kids while she and i sat at a table and talked. so what to do now? apologize for the stupidity of our argument today.... nope, instead i find myself wishing he would text me from work and make things right... but he will not. He will stew at work and think about all of our flaws while I am at home awake all night feeling sorry for myself, having shameful conversations with a friend.....