Monday, August 11, 2008

I tried to keep my excitement to a minimum, but I probably grinned way too big as I waved Big D off to second grade this morning. It helps that he was so ready to go back; hanging around the house with your little sister and brother is only so entertaining.

Do you see that backpack? It was stuffed with folders, crayons, and scissors. But that wasn't all. Big D also had to carry a separate bag filled with Other School Supplies that Annoy Kelly. OSSAK, as we will refer to them, include hand sanitizer, facial tissues, Post-its, baby wipes, and Ziploc bags.

Let's review. I pay taxes. People who don't even have children pay taxes. I pay $100 for "book rental." And on top of that, I have to send in freaking Kleenex.

Okay, fine. Kids are messy. I'm sure baby wipes come in handy at times. Come flu and cold season, I'll be grateful they're passing around the Purell. But Post-its? I was asked to send three packages of Post-its. Let's say there are 25 kids in Big D's class. That's 75 packages of Post-its. And there are usually three to four pads in a package. So that's...AN INORDINATE AMOUNT OF POST-ITS. While I try my best never to sound like a bitter old woman, I went to school for thirteen years and not only managed, but thrived without Post-its.

I'll hush, be glad I can afford it, and send in the OSSAK. But if I don't see some terrific project made entirely out of yellow sticky sheets of paper by the time this school year is over, I'm raising all sorts of hell.