Sunday, October 6, 2013

changing seasons

The weather is cooling off and the leaves are changing. I love the change of seasons and I've always loved fall, especially in New England. I always think of the brilliant colored leaves, baking with apples and pumpkin and pulling on a sweater or scarf. It's a comforting season to me.

This year the change comes with a personal season of change. My maternity leave is coming to an end. While we've already transitioned to parenthood, I am about to embark on the world of being a working mother. It will be bittersweet I'm sure.

Leaving Maggie while I go to work each day will be hard. It might be the hardest thing I've had to do, at least in my career.

But I have treasured these last 12 weeks at home with her. I don't regret one single minute. I took photos almost daily. I stood by her crib and just watched her sleep (yes, I know that sounds weird).

We stayed in our jammies until noon (or longer) and watched morning TV shows. Some days we both napped. We visited friends and took lots of walks.

It has also been hard. I've felt lonely, even isolated at times. There were days I did not talk to another adult for an entire day while my husband is at work and had an evening class. There were days I tried to get out the door to run errands and it just didn't happen. Instead of beating myself up, I decided we need to go at our own pace.

Maggie has stolen my heart in a way I didn't know was possible. Motherhood is a beautiful adventure and as hard as this change of seasons may be, I am ready for it. I am pretty sure skipping naps will be an adjustment, but we will survive. We will find new rhythms. As I anticipate the beauty of a new season, just as I look forward to the changing leaves in New England each autumn.

Have you experienced the transition of going back to working outside the house? If you have any tips, please feel free to leave them in the comments section below!

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