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New to blogging.. I am a stepmom and need help..

I am 32 years old. I have 3 kids and 4 stepkids. From the begining of me and my husbands relationship we have had issues. It was always my kids this and my kids that. I took my kids side and he took his kids side. It was pure hell. Well we went to a marriage retreat and it really opened my eyes to how marriage is really suppose to be. The marriage first then the kids. Ever since that day I have followed that. He works out of town and I get his kids on his weekends and keep them. I have a close bond with them. Even through the attitudes and disrespect I try to treat all 7 kids equally. But everytime he comes home and his kids are here he treats me horrible. Saying I try and ruin his weekend because the kids are here. He makes me out to be the enemy. When Im the one taking care of them spending time with them and doing all I can. He talks crap about me to them. He puts them against me. Yet I still make sure my kids listen and respect him and I never talk bad about him. If I get onto his kids Im picking on them. He watches my older boys like a hawk to see what he can get onto them about their shoes being on the floor in their rooms to how long they take showers. His kids can yell at him have attitude tell him no and he hugs them and loves on them. My kids if they have a bit of an attitude he treats them like shit. I dont get it. Im to my breaking point. He compares everything yet he is the one not equal at all. I feel like im beatin down and so alone. I love my husband but Im not sure if I can take being treated like an enemy and not a wife anymore. Someone please give me some good advice I cant talk to my family because I dont want anyone to think bad of him. I dont work anymore and so I really have no friends to talk to anymore.

Yes he went too. He has never put me before the kids. I tell him and he gets mad. The second he takes them home he tells me he is sorry for treating me that way. Its the exact same story everytime. Im getting so depressed and I dread him being home. My kids dad doesnt pick them up on his weekends like he is supposed to so when he doesnt he gets mad at my kids for having to stay here. It breaks my heart because its not their fault. My husband works out of town and I pick up his kids on his weekends and he isnt even here. Im just so lost right now. I feel like I am in a prison.

I would never say this lightly- bit I would leave his sorry a!!- if what you are saying is to the letter true- that's AWFUL!! I might try counseling but I would put a stop to that nonsense or be out the door- the long term effects of this on your children could be devastating - its really bordering emotional abuse!

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