I try to keep things real with my advice here on Sarcastic Parenting so here is a list of 5 realistic ways you can prepare yourself BEFORE you get pregnant!

1) Sleep on your side!Belly and Back sleeping will be a thing of the past. Don't "get it all in now" because you'll have trouble transitioning later. Try to roll onto your side if you wake up sleeping another way. Bonus if you can become accustomed to sleeping on your left side (something about arteries and blood flow)

2) Enjoy your favorite foods now!Especially things on the "no no" lists (rare steak, soft cheese, sushi, etc)! Eat those now and SAVOR EVERY BITE. Take your time drinking that glass of wine or mixed drink. Eat the things you love because your taste buds might change. It's usually joked about in the form of cravings and "ice cream and pickles lolz." You may develop a sudden love of salsa or find that you can't be in the same room as someone eating pizza. ENJOY IT NOW.

3) Make your bathroom a nice place. You'll be there a lot whether it's peeing, puking, or any other of the fun things pregnancy might bring. Stash a comfy pillow under the sink (tile is hard on the knees). Paint it a color you like. Put up some art you won't want to light on fire when it's 2am and you're in there for the 15th time peeing. ​4) Grooming!Are you one that enjoys having smooth legs or other areas? Start getting waxes regularly. There will be a time when you can't reach (or see in some cases) these things. Getting the hair waxed regularly NOW will make it softer and easier to deal with later on.

5) Self CareLook, pregnancy can be awesome. It has sweet and funny moments. It's also full of nausea/vomiting, weird pains, weird swelling, heartburn, etc... Start a routine of taking a few hours each week (a whole day or a little bit each day) where you take care of YOU. Read a book, watch your favorite show with your feet up, fix your nails...whatever you like. If you make it a routine NOW, you won't feel bad about taking the time when you're pregnant. Trust me, your body is going to be working HARD to literally grow another human. It's okay to take time for yourself.