Montag, 30. April 2012

Today was a rather nice day. In the morning I had a counseling interview and although it was quite disappointing it took me to the next level. Why I am going to write some people emails. I hope it won't take too long to get a proper answer though.

Afterwards I ride the bicycle for an hour and went home to read some stuff for the University on the Internet and well, like usual I read through some blogs and found these freaking gorgeous photos!

Her name is Vita Sidorkina and yeah, she is a model. One of the most beautiful models I've ever seen. I love her long her, the expression of her face, the innocent gaze.

The second photo which really liked was this one from Emily Didonato. You may know her from fashion magazines and some advertisements on television. I wonder what these girls do for everyday to take her body in shape. . .

Tomorrow I have a day off and I am going to take a long walk / go out to run and have as little food as possible to get rid off all the fat on my hips, leg, arms, everywhere!

Samstag, 28. April 2012

It has been a long while since my last entry on this side and well, I am not happy about it. Unfortunately things turned horrible. As I may told you my mother was on her holidays and I spend most of the time at my grannies. She is such a nice person, she really is. The only thing that bothers me is that she spends most of the time in the kitchen cooking. Not that her food isn't delicious, it's just it's too delicious. While I was there, I bet my stomach got huge and I lost the feeling of not being hungry.

I gained weight.

At that time I did not want to believe in it too much, I kept telling myself that it won't take too long to get rid of all the kilos again. But now? I am embarrassed to look at myself on the mirror. It makes me cry because I was used to be way more skinnier when I came back from Japan . . . but now? It just cannot be possible that I am on 58 kg again. No, I don't want to believe it. From today on, I will write a real personal diary in here. Only honest thoughts and honest actions.

Every night, around 8pm I will post a detailed food diary followed by a detailed exercise report. I will try to at every calorie, in every fucking meal.