Essentially, One Must Be a Gemini to Work Corporate

Two-facedness is an essential quality of working corporate. While at work, you must act as a husk of yourself–never letting on that you are an entirely different person in your outside life. Surely your boss and co-workers couldn’t possibly understand that out of the confines of the cube, you have other aspirations–“hopes and dreams,” as the cliche goes.

But to express this with your real and true personality is unthinkable. At work, you, like everyone else, must remain in 2-D. You must choose between keeping your head down in order to cope or joining the cult and plastering on a smile about how much you love your job. The latter approach is what requires the zodiac sensibility of a Gemini, a sign that undoubtedly comprises a large portion of corporate Midtown.