Now readers we swear we are not making any of this up! We ventured over to that noodley appendage called the Tentacle. We check it from time to time because we like to keep our readers informed on Kirby’s propaganda. Well, instead we were treated to a little essay from a gentleman named Galahad Sweetbottom, who refers to himself as the “Commodore of the Mountains”. Now your Yokel Ladies have to figure this mystery out. So far we found one other Tentacle piece on him and have discovered his Twitter feed. There’s no way this guy can be real, right? So let’s speculate wildly on the real identity of Commodore Sweetbottom!