Category: Hymn

I’ve been looking for this “joke” for a while now and finally found it at this website.

Old Farmer Joe went to the big city one weekend and attended the big city church. He came home and his wife asked him how it was.

“Well,” said the farmer. “It was good. They did something different, though. The sang praise choruses instead of hymns.”

“Praise choruses,” she said. “What are those?”

“Oh, they’re OK,” said the farmer. “They’re sort of like hymns,” he said, “only different.”

“What’s the difference?” said his wife.

“Well,” said the farmer, “If I said, ‘the cows are in the corn,’ that would be a hymn. But if I were to say to you,

‘Martha Martha MARTHA,
O Martha MARTHA MARTHA,
The cows, the big cows, the brown cows, the black cows,
The black and white cows,
The COWS COWS COWS,
Are in the corn, are in the corn, are in the corn,
CORN, CORN, CORN,’

….then if I were to repeat the whole thing four or five times, then that would be a praise chorus.”

The next weekend his nephew, a young Christian from the big city, came to visit his Uncle Joe and Aunt Martha. He attended their local church in the small town. When he went home his mother asked him how it was.

“Well,” he said, “it was good. They did something different, however. They sang hymns instead of praise choruses.”

“Hymns,” asked his mother. “What are those?”

The young man said, “Well, it’s like this.” If Uncle Joe were to say to Aunt Martha, ‘the cows are in the corn,’ then that would be a praise chorus. But if he were to say:

Yea those cows in glad bovine, rebellious delight,
Have broke free from their shackles, their warm pens eschewed,
Then goaded by minions of darkness and night,
They all my mild Chilliwak sweet corn have eschewed.’

Then if he were to do only verses one, three and four and do a key change in the last verse, that would be a hymn.”

This is a hymn I wrote a few years ago. The suggested tune to sing it to is “Zlobie Lezy,” which is also used for the hymn “Christ Is Risen.”

God our Father, great Creator,
rules in splendor over all.
You have made this world a wonder;
of your glory, we’re in awe
Crashing seas, their waves are pounding.
Trees and flowers are resounding.
Towering mountains raise a glad song,
as creation sings along

Christ our Savior and Redeemer
lived and died to set us free.
From our sins and death delivered,
we now serve and worship thee.
We’re so thankful for the gift, Lord,of new life that’s ours to have.So we give our hearts to you nowas before you, Christ, we bow

Holy Spirit, our Sustainer,
and our Comforter each day,
Fill our souls with your sweet presence;
Keep us on the narrow way
Help us serve God and to love God.
Strengthen us in mind and soul.
Till we always look to you and
seek your pow’r to keep us whole.

God our Father, Christ our Savior,
Holy Spirit, three in one;
You have made us. You have saved us,
and You keep us in your love.
We your people praise your glory,
and your story we will share.
Until all are praising your name,
and you’re worshiped everywhere.

While it may not be something that everyone likes, I like this version of the Christmas classic by Jars of Clay. You can download this and other free Christmas MP3s at Amazon.com on this page. Click the link below to listen.

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Yours Truly Through the Years

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The Prodigal Son

And Jesus said, A certain man had two sons: And the younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living. And not many days after the younger son gathered all together, and took his journey into a far country, and there wasted his substance with riotous living.

And when he had spent all, there arose a mighty famine in that land; and he began to be in want. And he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country; and he sent him into his fields to feed swine. And he would fain have filled his belly with the husks that the swine did eat: and no man gave unto him. And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father’s have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger! I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants.

And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him. And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son. But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry: For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.