Weekly Hamptons Revenge Recap – Season 3, Episode 8: “Secrecy”

Welcome to this week’s Revenge recap, folks. Warning: There was a massive development at the end of this week’s episode that is spoiled below, so if you want to see it for yourself, go watch and come back. You’ve been forewarned.

And now, Season 3, Episode 8, “Secrecy”…

We flashback to 2010, as Daniel and Sara roll around on the sand, in a scene ripped directly from the opening moments of Grease — literally. “What if your mother hates me?” Sara asks Daniel cutely. “She won’t! But if she does, I’ll protect you!” he replies. Alas, the daydream ends. Looking good getting out of the shower, Daniel is surprised to find Emily waiting for him. He’s being distant and ignoring her advances. She reminds him that their bridal shower is tomorrow. Daniel echoes the sentiments of the viewer: “I don’t get why it has to be co-ed.” Emily shrugs; she’s happy. “I’m happy you’ll be there to protect me from her.” Heh heh. Not going to end well.

Victoria is on the phone with a mystery person, speaking very slowly and carefully. “I’m so happy you’re coming,” she exclaims and then hangs up. Charlotte, who has been hanging out at Grayson Manor more, sits down with Victoria and asks her to help with her bridal shower speech — she lost her phone, where the speech was written (Honey, that’s what iCloud is for). Charlotte then gives Victoria some intel on Operation Sara, which appears to be working…

Jack asks Nolan to help him make sure Margaux doesn’t get in deep with Conrad, but Nolan’s got other things to worry about — he’s getting a new roommate. Jack’s livid when Nolan tells him Aiden is moving in and Aiden and Emily are leaving town together after the wedding. Then Emily walks in. Awkward turtle. Jack is hurt that Emily is leaving with the man who strong-armed him. “You don’t get to pass judgment,” she snipes, noting he gave her an ultimatum to leave by the end of the summer.

At a Montauk farmer’s market on a wet parking lot, Daniel meets Sara, who’s buying strawberries. She feels guilty about their secret meetings (they haven’t done anything though). Sara doesn’t want to hurt Emily. Daniel tells Sara he can’t get her out of his head and leaves for work. Just when Sara thinks the farmer’s market has become “their place,” she turns to find Emily.

Emily does her best cry and plays hurt that Sara and Daniel are running around. “You’re the kind of girl a mother loves,” she weeps to a totally convinced Sara, adding ruefully, “That’s why I feel so threatened by you.” Sara promises she’s not a home wrecker and apologizes to Emily.

Conrad heads to Voulez and tells Margaux he got a better offer for his memoir. “Don’t forget to preorder,” he snarks after she accuses him of turning her offer into a bidding war. Conrad then goes to Daniel, who’s happy his dad turned Margaux down. Conrad notices the (organic!) strawberries and intimates that he knows about Daniel’s feelings for Sara. Conrad tells Daniel it’s time for a Grayson rite of passage…

Margaux tells Jack she’s digging into the history of Grayson Global. Jack tries to downplay the situation. She leaves and Charlotte tells him she’s glad he’s happy (and mentions her missing phone, which is becoming increasingly suspect). When Jack asks her what she knows about Aiden, Charlotte says that he’s trouble, but gets distracted by a strange email and texts Aiden (on her suddenly NOT missing phone?). Meanwhile, Aiden is being read the house rules by Nolan.

Sara meets with Victoria, who’s super polite. Sara tells her she’s not going to help break up Emily and Daniel, Victoria tells her Emily only cares about money and status and she can prove it. Speaking of clandestine meetings, Conrad brings Daniel to a swanky secret love condo that has been in the Grayson family for generations. He gives Danny Boy some advice: marry Emily and “go to the farmer’s market” with Sara. Daniel looks slightly ill as Conrad waxes poetic about his many conquests, including dear Lydia, may she rest in peace…

Emily shows Nolan a necklace she found and assumes Daniel bought for her, which is a good sign he’s back on track. Nolan’s not buying it and convinces her to buy her betrothed a special gift of her own: a watch with tracking capabilities?!

Keep reading to see who has returned to terminate the Grayson clan? Graphic: Oliver Peterson / ABC

Aiden goes to the Stowaway, it seems, to argue with Jack. Jack stands up to him, but Aiden says he and Emily only had puppy love. Threats are exchanged. Charlotte looks on and then meets Aiden outside. She reveals she met a photographer in Europe who took some dirty photos and now her phone is missing and she’s being blackmailed. Aiden agrees to help her, on the house.

It’s time for the most passive aggressive bridal shower ever! Victoria hired Sara to cater the entire affair, Charlotte gives a speech in which she threatens Emily not to hurt Daniel, Daniel accuses Sara of working with Victoria, Margaux presses a lips-sealed Nolan about Grayson Global secrets and Charlotte heads to Montauk for an emergency meeting.

Outside the Stowaway, Aiden confronts the junky-looking dude who has Charlotte’s phone. After Aiden brutalizes the guy, Jack breaks them up and Aiden returns Charlotte’s phone.

Following that boring interlude, we return to the bridal shower. It’s time for a game of “This Is Your Life,” where bride and groom get blindfolded and have to guess each mystery guest. Daniel’s up first and has some innocent fun, but Victoria has a “surprise” for Emily. “It’s so heartbreaking that Emily has so few family or friends,” she begins before introducing Emily’s “first husband,” Rojan, to the party! Everyone is stunned, but Emily wins: she married Rojan so he could get his green card and be with his male lover, who is also at the party. Foiled again, Victoria! Sara realizes Victoria is truly sick and leaves.

Turns out Rojan is a Takeda (Revenge School) alum. Nolan enjoys getting to know the Revenger, who reveals he really was married to Emily for his green card. He reveals that he’s a ruby miner and Emily asks him to set the watch for her. “This is going to be one hell of a wedding,” Nolan sighs.

Sara arrives at the love condo to end things with Daniel, who does not want to marry Emily because she and Victoria are the same. In a shocking (not really) twist, the necklace was for Sara — Daniel gave it to her in 2010 and wants her to have it back. He places it around her neck and they kiss, but she pulls away. Daniel promises he’ll break up with Emily.

Victoria tells Emily about the love condo. Apparently knowledge of that condo has been in the Grayson wives’ club for generations, as well. Emily calls the condo, her fears confirmed. Victoria’s satisfied.

Jack meets with Emily to talk about Aiden brutally attacking the guy outside the bar and asks her how well she really knows her boyfriend. Next door, Aiden reveals to Nolan that he is using Charlotte’s computer and phone to get to the Graysons, but Nolan thinks it’s a bad idea. Aiden then tells Nolan there’s something important he needs to tell him but Emily can’t know…

Conrad shows Victoria a draft of his memoir The Choices We Make. Victoria is confident that Daniel’s going to call off the wedding. Conrad reminds Victoria that she was once the other woman and tells her he got rid of his “bachelor pad” years ago. She rolls her eyes.

Daniel and Emily agree they need to talk, but Ems doesn’t let Daniel talk. Emily confesses to Daniel that she followed him to the farmers’ market and confronted Sara. She explains that she was uncharacteristically emotional, so she went to the doctor. Daniel asks if she’s okay, and she exclaims that she’s great and drops this whammy: They’re pregnant!

As if that wasn’t enough of a cliffhanger, Jack calls Margaux, who is meeting with someone in the city who claims to have massive intel on the Graysons. Jack wonders who they are and tells Margaux to be careful before hanging up. Margaux turns around to meet her mystery contact…

Wait for it…wait for it…BOOM! LYDIA DAVIS.

Closing Thoughts: “Secrecy” sure did live up to its name! Everyone’s keeping secrets, and they’re all dangerous. But for the record, I had no idea that Lydia would be returning when I named her in last week’s Revenge Top 5 about characters who should return. Now we just need William Devane to return for the wedding! Exactly how many of my predictions have been accurate this season?

Takedown of the week: Lots of mini-explosions.Best Moment: That ending.Worst Moment: Charlotte.Question of the Week: Who started to develop a fatal attraction to Charlotte last season (the story was mercifully dropped)?

Unfortunately, Revenge won’t have a new episode for three weeks. We’ll be back then to find out what’s next for our favorite evil Hamptonites! In the meantime, look for some supplementary Revenge posts to hold you over.