Saturday, May 12, 2012

While waiting in line to buy flowers for Mother's Day (I know, cliche, isn't it?), boyfriend mentioned, "Flowers used to be free, then somebody commercialized them."

Then, I tried thinking of something that hasn't been packaged and sold. Water? Dirt? Heck, somebody even thought to package and sell rocks, one at a time, in the form of a pet rock. "The guy made a million dollars!"

Honestly, if I set my mind to it, I can make a pretty damn good looking bouquet from flowers growing the the park. I've done it before. You just have to be willing to use those so-called weeds.

By the way, why are dandelions weeds? Not only are they a gorgeous color, but you can eat them. Why are we trying to kill them all the time? If anything, they're prettier than the grass we try so hard to make look perfect.

Also, what's up with Homeowner's Associations? You know, speaking of lawns and all that. But yeah, I honestly don't understand them half of the time - it seems like you're paying fees, for what? For people to send out letters telling you your lawn looks terrible (because there's been a drought, duh!). I know, I know, they keep property values up, or something, or they keep your neighborhood from looking like the projects. Or something. Is it obvious I'm not a homeowner?

Also, in case I haven't said it: Happy Mother's Day, everybody! Especially to mothers. Thanks for giving birth to the rest of the world!

Friday, May 11, 2012

Tonight, I had to go back and scour my Twitter (and by that, I mean scroll down a little bit) for a tweet about summitting a mountain.

You see, I was hiking up a mountain yesterday, and on the way down, this lady looks at me and says, "You must be KT."

I immediately went into a small panic, because I was suddenly thinking that I had an insanely thorough stalker. Or at least, a stalker who scoured my Reddit account for information on me. Which, if you're really thorough, could probably get you quite a lot of information.

Of course, not wanting to immediately give away my super secret author identity, I laughed it off with a half-hearted, "What are you talking about?" kind of answer.

(At this point, I'm aware that this story is likely to sound completely made up. Seriously, though, this is 100% true...which is why it's so god damn weird.)

"Somebody wrote, 'I heart KT' in the snow back there."

(DISCLAIMER: I did not write my own "initials" in the snow. That's a silly and ineffective form of advertising.)

"Oh, okay," I said.

The lady and her male counterpart hiked in the opposite direction, while boyfriend and I continued to walk down the mountain for a ways, until I looked at him. He knew what I was thinking, and he teased me on the origin of the initials of my pseudonym. Of course, my thoughts at the time were along the lines of, "What in the world did I post on Twitter?"

The two of us continued to walk, heading down the mountain, when suddenly, we came upon it. We came upon the (now infamous) "I heart KT."

Again, I would like to point out that I did not write this, and according to my boyfriend, neither did he.

However, whoever was on Barr Trail near Colorado Springs and wrote this for whatever reason, I think you ought to know that you damn near gave me a heart attack.