Rob Hutchings is a chiropractor who conducts his business at Body Brilliant Chermside, in Brisbane. He is a member of the Chiropractors’ Association of Australia. Hutchings is a self-confessed anti-vaccinationist who first came to our attention, in 2010, for making anti-vaccine comments on the Facebook page of the disreputable Australian Vaccination Network. Hutchings has appeared in this blog several times; most recently for claiming that his Facebook profile had been hacked whenever his Facebook profile had made anti-vaccine comments on the internet. The following are Hutchings’ treatment and cure claims made this year in the Facebook group, Chiropractic Success Stories.

– I have a new patient who is a former DRUG COMPANY REP!!!! The shit PATIENT has told me PATIENT used to do is seriously crazy!! I’m aware of the unethical and often (usually) illegal stuff they get up to to market drugs, but it still boggles my mind when I hear it

– PATIENT has been on every medication – from antidepressants to pain killers, from thyroid meds to antibiotics (taken for preventative reasons), and this PATIENT was a MESS

– NOW – PATIENT has had 13 adjustments. No more headaches, no more depression, no more recurring cough, a lot more energy, has started eating well, PATIENT thyroid test PATIENT had last week shows it to be normal

– PATIENT resigned from being a drug rep soon after hearing my talk at a local community centre and now has a job as a community estate planner

– I’d write out the stuff PATIENT was forced to do as a drug rep, but it would take to long, and besides, I just saw this, and it is summed up better than I ever could here. Take the 17 minutes. It is WORTH IT!!! Hilarious yet frighteningly accurate….

February 14 – Kidney stones cured. Forced treatment on mother.

– When mum was 21 (8 years before I was born), she suffered kidney stones. Every 2 years or so until 2001 she was in hospital having kidney stones removed. I recall this happening throughout my childhood, never really understanding what was going on

– It got that bad for her that in 2001, she had a kidney removed. By this time, I was about 18 months away from graduating chiropractic college. I begged her not to do it and see a chiropractor first, but I was unsuccessful. She had her left kidney removed and measurements found that her right kidney was at 40% function and “full of rocks.”

– To this day, mum was my most difficult new patient. She was probably THE most difficult patient ANYONE has ever had. EVER

– It took 2 hours, and during that time of butting heads mum initially refused to let me to do so much as a postural evaluation. I eventually got it all done and it was time to adjust her on my portable table that I had

– All hell broke loose and I’m pretty sure World War 3 was seconds away from starting

– I’ve never encountered such resistance to anyone getting adjusted. Like everyone else, I’ve had my share of people say no, but never with such ferocity

– Despite considering myself a peaceful, non violent guy, I did something I would never do again. I wrestled my mum onto the table and adjusted her lumbar spine. She stood up and said, “Oh! That feels much better! Why didn’t you do that earlier?”

– Summoning all my will power that years of triathlons had given me, I silently repeated the mantra, “Never hit your mother, never hit your mother….”

– She then let me adjust the rest of her spine. She began regular chiropractic care from that time and it continues to this day

– We had a few battles over vaccination – that was a tough nut to crack – but she eventually agreed to research it

– Remember every 2 years or so, she’d have to get kidney stones removed from both kidneys, her remaining kidney was “full of rocks” and at 40% function according to the tests.

– Her most recent round of testing around the middle of last year revealed no kidney stones and 95% function of her right kidney. She has not had to go to hospital to have kidney stones removed since that first adjustment. (A hard won but worthwhile battle….. though to any students or new grads reading this, I do not recommend wrestling any patient onto the table. It might be frowned upon….)

February 20 – Dyslexia cured. Webinars plugged.

– Same young PATIENTS I posted about last time – the two that want to become chiropractors now – I gave the first adjustment to the oldest last night after PATIENT’s report of findings

– This young PATIENT has had 2 BIG stacks where PATIENT hit head badly – a fall down a flight of stairs and a fall off a trampoline. Despite being only XX years old, there are signs of degeneration at C3/4 – disc damage and bone spurring. (But we shouldn’t check kids, right Australian media??)

– PATIENT was a little tense when I went to adjust PATIENT’s neck so I whispered to PATIENT, “Think about pink elephants”, PATIENT quickly relaxed and I adjusted PATIENT

– PATIENT went up to the front desk afterwards and asked Karyn (my superhero CA), “How did he know to tell me to think about pink elephants? My favourite animals are elephants and my favourite color is pink!! He can read my mind!!!”

– First time in history (and likely the last) that it’s been suggested that I can read a lady’s mind…. : )

– Anyway, this young PATIENT suffers dyslexia. Just read an email from them, received last night after I left the office:

– When they got home and mum and dad started reading the bed time story, PATIENT suddenly said, “None of the words are jumbled anymore!! All the words make sense now!!”

– Perhaps I’ll ignore the Australian media and keep checking kids….

– If anyone is interested in my upcoming webinars, the first of which is on March 3rd, please send me a private message and I will send you the link to register. But I’m at a seminar all weekend starting in about an hour, so I may not get a chance to reply until early next week.

– So we checked PATIENT little spine and found PATIENT was severely subluxated at C1,2, T5, T11, L1 and S1. PATIENT had a pelvic tilt and a kyphotic neck

– The family is seperated and PATIENT’s FAMILY MEMBER decided to kick up a fuss just because it was one of those times FAMILY MEMBER could

– With a lot of patience over about a 2 week period, we coaxed PATIENT’s FAMILY MEMBER into coming to see me to view the x-rays. When it finally happened, I won’t say it was a pleasant experience. If I were a judgemental person, I’d label FAMILY MEMBER an arrogant prick who was putting FAMILY MEMBER’s own ego and desire to cause FAMILY MEMBER’s OTHER-FAMILY MEMBER trouble above FAMILY MEMBER’s PATIENT’s health. FAMILY MEMBER began to storm out of the office, saying absolutely NOT to FAMILY MEMBER’s PATIENT having chiropractic care

– But there were several people waiting in the adjusting area as FAMILY MEMBER came out of the report room. One of the little boys was telling Karyn he no longer suffered ear infections as a result of chiro and his mum was saying her digestion problems were history as well

– FAMILY MEMBER paused. FAMILY MEMBER then stood in the corner and watched some adjustments. After I finished adjusting about 15 people, many of whom said things like they were sleeping better, had no more pain, no more asthma, etc., FAMILY MEMBER came back up to me and asked me what that was all about

– I patiently explained the story to FAMILY MEMBER again. I could see FAMILY MEMBER was conflicted between FAMILY MEMBER’s ego and FAMILY MEMBER’s PATIENT’s health, but FAMILY MEMBER took a deep breath and said, “yes, fine. Do your thing.” And FAMILY MEMBER left

– Now, several weeks later little PATIENT has no more sinus or ear infections, no more digestion problems and PATIENT’s FAMILY MEMBER was seen as a new patient last week and had FAMILY MEMBER’s first adjustment today!!

– My first webinar is happening on Tuesday next week. If you are interested, please private message me and I’ll send you the link to register

Publicly captured image courtesy Facebook 2011.

Thanks to Super Shooper for halo addition.

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Note:

All of Hutchings’ stories come from a closed Facebook group called Chiropractic Success Stories. I am reproducing these abridged stories under Fair Dealing, and in the public interest, for the following reasons: Hutchings admits to treating coma patients in a hospital and admits that he knows that this is a breach of the Code of Conduct for Chiropractors; Hutchings is demonstrably using anti-vaccination misinformation in treating patients; Hutchings is demonstrably claiming to treat or cure conditions outside of his scope of practise; Hutchings admits to using anecdotal stories in his private practice. Patients are also drawn from public screenings; and Hutchings admits that these stories are used as word of mouth testimonials in schools and kindergartens, thereby accruing more patients.

Although listed as a “closed group”, the Facebook group Chiropractic Success Stories cannot realistically claim to be a private group for the use of chiropractors only: it has over 3500 members; non-practitioners are regularly permitted to join; Hutchings knows that the group is not private, referring to “trolls” in the group on several occasions; and group administrators and Hutchings are aware that stories from the group have been shared on Facebook and elsewhere on numerous occasions.

I have edited Hutchings’ comments into point form so as to retain the content of his claims without boring the reader into a subluxation-induced coma, brought on due to his overuse of words employed in the act of fictional self-aggrandisement. Hutchings’ original spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors are retained.

I have replaced pronouns, ages, and genders of individuals – where possible – with “PATIENT”, “PATIENT1”, “PARENT1”, “FAMILY MEMBER”, and “XX”.

Basically, the text is Hutchings’. I’ve replaced words for the purposes of anonymising the stories, and the people used in them.

7 Responses to The Chiropractic Messiah Monologues 2

Well, this fellow most certainly is special!
If there is one thing a wzrd recognizes, it is magic and this fellow is a magical dynamo!
I eagerly await how adjustments next cure drought and flooding. Indeed, with enough adjustments of mythical maladies, global climate change would be halted and reversed within minutes!
Then, he can adjust the economy.
Bloody hell, this wzrd will be out of work!