“Cake or Death?” Hopefully many of you have heard the joke and get the reference. What this blog is really about though, is the fact that I feel like more and more people, mostly misled by the government and health institutions, would choose “Death” over “Cake”. Or perhaps worse than death, a life filled with suffering from various diseases. Give me the choice and I will most certainly choose good all fashioned fattening, sugary, empty calorie cake.

It seems to me though that many people now-a-days are so concerned with not being fat or not giving their kids sugar, that they are willing to choose way more harmful options. Our society has taught us that if something does not have calories, it must be okay for you. Give your kids diet cola instead of regular. Apparently corn syrup, which is merely made from corn, is evil, but aspartame, which causes epilepsy and cancer especially in kids, is an acceptable substitute. People praise canola oil because it’s less fattening than butter. What they don’t tell you is it comes from a poisonous plant and has been linked in studies to diseases like Alzheimer’s and dementia. So it seems like the people we trust to guide our dietary paths are basically telling us “O sorry, we’re out of cake. You can have death.”

What if, instead of worrying so much about these calories and things, let your kid have a little piece of cake now and then- then send him OUTSIDE to ride his bike or run around until the sugar runs off! Or if they did well in school that week, maybe they can have some dessert or a soda. It’s more about moderation! If you’re still concerned, pick unrefined sugars or use olive oil, it’s still a little fattening but its a good type of fat! Most importantly, people should just practice self-control.

It has been requested of me to write a post on the homeless people we see all around town, so, being the good natured person that I am, I figured I would oblige this request.

First of all, to anyone who hasn’t been to Tampa, FL, I’m not sure you know how bad the homeless problem is here. Unless maybe you live in another big city, but I digress. If you drive down any street around here, especially one leading to a major interstate or US Highway, you will most likely see people begging on the median for change (and not the kind Obama offered!) I do like that the city makes them wear bright yellow and orange caution vests so I don’t hit them in the road. Sometimes, they offer you something for your change- like a bottle of water or the Sunday paper or some flowers. This is actually respectable, I think. Newsies back in the day were pretty much the same thing: poor, homeless people and orphans. If you’re going to pay money for the paper anyways, you might as well help the guy out and buy it from him, plus you won’t even have to stop anywhere on your way to wherever to get it.

Then there’s the people that you have to wonder if they are really homeless or just lazy scam artists. I remember my high school government teacher telling me how he went to Washington D.C. one time (where they apparently also had a large homeless problem) and saw a guy on crutches begging for money on the side of the road. At the end of the day, he was driving back to his hotel and saw the same guy get up, throw his crutches in the back of his Ferrari, and drive off. Apparently panhandling in D.C. really pays off! Another friend of mine told me how she was downtown waiting for a tow truck after she was in an accident one time. The homeless guy who had been begging at the median came across and asked is she needed any help, after politely declining, she watched him walk into HIS HOUSE! The homeless man had a house! Another friend told me he saw a homeless man begging on one corner of he street, and on the corner across was a Flying J that had a “now hiring” sign. When he pointed this out to the homeless man, he just said “They wouldn’t pay me enough”!

Then there’s also plenty of cases of where they say they are starving, so you offer to buy them a cheeseburger or something and they politely decline saying they already have food. Well, then clearly they are not starving! This is why I won’t give money to any of them, you can’t tell who, if anyone, is legit! It’s sad that people are so lazy. I work a crappy job so I can pay my bills, I’m sure they can find something!

Then there’s also the countless bums walking around places like Ybor and downtown St. Pete. These bums are more scary I think. When you see them, you are generally not protected by your car. Then they tend to follow you around no matter how many times you protest and claim to only have plastic on you. Most of these guys just want beer money. If they were honest about it, I may even be tempted to help them out. But let’s be honest, I need beer money too! There are some homeless people that have a little more pride. They, like the waterboys and newsies, what to give you something in exchange for their money, so they give you whatever random things they collected, like seeds or bags full of condoms. Again, at least they are trying to help you out too.

I guess, when all is said and done, the homeless problem will never be as bad here as many other places. Still, if you want my money you have to work for it. Have a clever sign. Offer me something in exchange for my money. Show you are somehow going to ear my hard earned money. Don’t try to scam me, it insults my intelligence, and that is one thing I will not tolerate being insulted!

The most rediculous thing happened at work tonight. For those of you who don’t know, I work at a fairly popular restaurant chain. Tonight, I had a table of two black ladies, a black guy, and a white lady with a baby. I took all their drink and food orders and brought their food out. I check to see if they need anything a few times, then I have my trainee bring them some to-go boxes. One of the black ladies asks my trainee “why you serve the white girl first?” First, let me state that that is a direct quote. Secondly, I wish I had been closer to answer ” a) She didn’t serve you, I did. Are you trying to say all white girls look the same? Who’s racist now? b) I gave her her food first because it was on the edge of the tray and I’ve already reached my allowance for dropping stuff this week.” But alas, I didn’t get to say either of those. Then, the white lady and the other black lady ask for a cup of juice for the baby. I say sure and proceed to ask the mother what type of juice. The first lady pipes in and says “yeah, get it for the little white baby”. As opposed to all the other invisible babies at the table?! Why do you have to point out the race of the baby when you could just say “the baby” and I’d know exactly who you were talking about?! I am not a racist, I just hate all stupid people, the color of your skin is your own problem. Oh, and guess which half of the table tipped me better? And they wonder why they are stereotyped….

You know the old saying “you are what you eat”? Well what if the reverse were true-“you eat what you are”. I think you can tell a lot about a person by how and what they eat. For example, for breakfast I usually eat either cookies and coffee (I’m Italian) or a bagel with cream cheese (I’m Jew-ish). Sometimes I have orange juice (I have a weak immune system). Sometimes I don’t eat breakfast at all (I’m very busy!) and sometimes I eat it at 3 a.m. (I party as hard as I work). See what you can learn just by observing people?Pay more attention to people, you’d be surprised some of the things you learn just by observing!

Want to make God laugh? Tell him your plans.
My life has become one giant crazy random happenstance.