‘Star Wars’ seeking beautiful and thin people for next film

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Disney is behind the next “Star Wars” film, and alleged cast descriptions have begun to leak that are predictably Hollywood.

The as-yet unnamed characters range from “late-teen female, independent, good sense of humour, fit” to “a late twentysomething male, fit, handsome and confident” to “a second young female, also late teens, tough, smart and fit,” according to Bleeding Cool.

It’s possible that Jabba the Hutt has a clause in his contract that he will have no obese competition, but the script does have a spot for a “seventy-something male, with strong opinions and tough demeanour… doesn’t need to be particularly fit.”

The Onion’s A.V. Club says is best : “As in galaxies near and far, NO FAT CHICKS.”