Really – I’ve been trying to stay out of my own head today, so randomly typing in my thoughts seemed like a good solution. I don’t know if you’ve seen the story on our local news, but a local woman was murdered by her husband in Colorado.

I know her.

Not as well as some or most, and granted our interactions of late have been her commenting on my facebook photos of the new puppy. But, never the less I know her. We went to jr. high and high school together, and played sports together, had classes together. She was always in the coooool crowd (my impression) but was really grounded, and nice and kind, and always was nice and kind to me – which given HS drama and my drifter status then – I remember those things. She had a fantastic smile, and big heart, and I am really bothered by the whole situation.

I commented at church on Saturday, after I was there for a funeral that 2011 had better not be “The Year of the Funeral, Part Deux” – because I can’t take it. 2007 into 2008 was the year of the funeral. I think I went to 16 in 14 months or something ridiculous. It was totally overwhelming and emotionally draining each time. They ranged from the very young to the very old and everyone in between. We lost 4 people connected to Hapitok, a tiny sweet young baby, and some really amazing people from church.

So now I’ve been to 3 funerals since Dec 30, which I’m rolling into 2011. I’ll be going to a fourth for Melinda. I didn’t know her in the last few years, but I just can’t get it or her 1 year old daughter out of my brain. I feel SO terrible for them, and it just feels overwhelming at times. So much loss to start this year off – mothers, fathers, grandfathers… just too much.

I realize that other people’s funerals are not about me, I get that. Its about those that lost that person about the daughters, sons, grandchildren – connected to those folks, I know that. But when it adds up… it adds up.

I don’t really know how to end this post. I know there are those that read this that have had a recent loss, and I don’t want you to think I’m not grateful that I could go to the funeral of your loved one. I held them in great esteem and valued them alot. I added them to the prayer list at church – but ummm because of my bad printing we’re praying for Jim, Wilmont, Joane, and Kelly, Lynette, Missie and Daria…. as opposed to the correcter spelling you might be familiar with… Jim Willmott, Joan… and Darla – and think about you and how you’re doing often.

I just want to not have to add more people to the list for this year. I’ve hit the funeral quota for 2011.

I heard about Melinda on the news last night. Both Andy and I could not remember her. He got out the high school year book and that photo looked far more familiar. I feel so bad for her daughter. I hope that her parents will get custody of that sweet girl and make sure she knows who her mommy was. So sad.

I agree. There is far too much loss right now. It’s too much. It’s overwelming. I’m in a fog these days. Thank you for keeping our family in your prayers. God knew who you meant. =)