Then, the night before his results were due back, Carter "went out and just went nuts," he tells People. "I drank so much and I did a bunch of blow. I felt like I was trying to kill myself – because I didn't want to get the results."

The diagnosis? Cardiomyopathy, a weakening of the heart that led to the death of singer Andy Gibb, 30, and actor Chris Penn, 40.

"I don't want to die," Carter tells People. "I don't want to be that person people read about and think, 'That's sad that he couldn't stop it and killed himself.'"