Tag: postabortive

I had the privilege of being interviewed on the radio about my new ministry, MybodyMyworship. When the audio recording becomes available, I’ll share it with you, but in the meantime, here is the transcript.

Katharine: I’m Katharine Wang and you’re listening Radio Fairfax in Fairfax, VA. This is Keys to Spiritual Growth. Today we’re going to answer listener questions live on the radio.

But first a reminder that you’re listening to Radio Fairfax, Fairfax, VA. Cablecast on Cox and Verizon FIOS Channel 37 and Comcast channel 27 in Reston, VA. Webcast worldwide on the internet at www.radiofairfax.org.

We’re live once a month answering questions about God and the Bible. I like to think of it as the type of question you’d like to ask God if you could pull up and chair and maybe grab a cup of tea and ask him something. We take questions in advance and also live right now. The call in number is 703-560-TALK. That’s 703-560-8255. Or on Facebook at facebook.com/mbministries.

Katharine: I’m here with my friend Lorelei, who’s going to tell us what questions we’ve received from listeners this past month. Lorelei, you couldn’t be with us last month. It’s good to have you back.

Lorelei: It’s good to be back.

Katharine: Before you tell us the first question from listeners, did I tell you we have two special guests on the show?

Lorelei: You did. I’m excited about meeting them.

Katharine: Yes, Cheryl Krichbaum is here with Michele Bair. Cheryl is the founder of a new ministry called My body My worship, which I’m excited to hear about. Michele is going to be part of this ministry, too.

Lorelei: Welcome to Keys to Spiritual Growth with Katharine Wang. We’re excited to have you on the show today.

Cheryl: We’re excited to be here.

Katharine: So Cheryl, you grew up in Minnesota going to church with your family, but it was more of a tradition that you did and you didn’t really believe Christianity or have its power.

Cheryl: Yeah, I didn’t understand what Christ’s sacrifice was about. I knew all the Bible stories, but I didn’t understand what they meant for me. When life got difficult, I turned my back on church and on God then made some pretty big mistakes. I became even more bitter against God. But then I met a man who wasn’t scared away by my life. In retrospect, I can see that he was showing me what the love of Christ was like. To make a long story short, he prayed for me, I accepted Christ, and then we got married.

Katharine: Let’s fast forward. Tell us about your trip to Africa.

Cheryl: I was in Uganda just over a year ago on a short-term mission trip. I had taught your Bible studies to children and had met a 5-year-old boy with Down Syndrome. That night I was asking one of the pastors about special needs children in Uganda and Africa which led to a discussion about abortion. The pastor said that he preaches on how our words often send women to have abortions. And that’s when I knew I needed to change the conversation about abortion.

Katharine: So you realized that the way the church talks about abortion can be damaging to women? How should the conversation change?

Cheryl: The pro-life movement usually talks about babies, trying to convince the abortion-minded that killing babies is wrong–and it is wrong. But the pro-choice movement is talking about women and women’s rights, not babies. Women choose abortion because they think it’s best for themselves. We are ego-centric people and Millenials even more so. We need to have conversations about women and the psychological damage that results from abortion. If they are Christians, then we also need to talk about the spiritual darkness they plunge themselves into when they have abortions. We need to have loving conversations that draw women into life–physically and spiritually.

Katharine: So women-centered, eternally-focused conversations about abortion. I like that. This topic has a personal interest to you, doesn’t it?

Cheryl: Yes, when life got difficult and I left the church and God, I went looking for love elsewhere. I spent more time with my boyfriend than in my parents’ home because life was difficult at home but pleasant with my boyfriend. Not surprisingly, I got pregnant. Because I didn’t want the shame of pregnancy in high school and because I wanted to stay on track with my education, I had an abortion. And then I made more bad choices, like living with my boyfriend, buying a house with him, and eventually marrying him even though I knew deep inside that I shouldn’t have. That marriage ended in divorce. And, by the way, I still had the shame of pregnancy in high school, and my education was not completed on schedule.

Katharine: What a powerful personal story. And now you’re founding a ministry called My Body My Worship. How is your work different from what other pro-life groups do?

Cheryl: We battle abortion in a way different than all other pro-life ministries–through true worship and teaching the nations all that Jesus commanded (Romans 12:1, Matthew 28:20). We do this through women’s conferences and social media posts.

Our mission is to inspire spiritual acts of worship by teaching biblically sound science of sexual integrity and psychological effects of abortion–based on Romans 12:1-2 and 1 Corinthians 6:12-20.

Katharine: Michele, that’s where you come in. You’ve been a worshipper and a worship leader at your church for more than 20 years.

Michele: Yes, one thing I’ve learned in over 20 years of leading worship is that our bodies, souls, and spirits are intertwined. When we worship, it washes out our spirits and souls. It’s like taking a spiritual shower. All the filth and grime of the day washes off, and we’re filled with God’s presence.

Katharine: And you’ve named the ministry My body my worship? Why?

Cheryl: The pro-choice movement says, “My body. My choice.” We say that it’s our choice to worship with our bodies. As Michele says, our worship and our bodies are intertwined. There are many ways to worship–with hymns, on our knees, with lifted hands, even dancing. But the New Testament believer should also worship with their whole bodies in a Levitical sense, meaning that they should be pure before the Lord.

We get this from Romans 12:1, which says: Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

Michele: We are also using worship as King Jehoshaphat in the Bible did to defeat his enemies. In 2 Chronicles 20, we see that the kingdom of Judah was about to be attacked by many enemies. King Jehoshaphat immediately went to the Lord. He called the country to pray and fast. Then he sent out a worship team ahead of the army. And GOD defeated their enemies.

Cheryl: We too are at war–spiritual war. Women (and men, but most obviously women) are under attack–even from other women. Women are fooled into thinking that abortion is no big deal. We are fooled into believing that we can have safe sex outside of marriage. We abort in order to avoid the shame of being caught pregnant out of wedlock, and then we hide our abortions because we are ashamed.

Katharine: A lot of people think of abortion as a political issue. But you don’t. Explain.

Cheryl: We don’t think God sees abortion as a political issue. When you embrace Daniel chapter 4, you can’t help but realize that God is in control of who is in office. I do believe that God is unhappy with His Christian nation legalizing abortion, so yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood and reverse Roe v Wade.

But God is unhappy with our hearts and is waiting for us, for Christians, to act like Christ. The real victory in this spiritual war is saving eternal lives of abortion-minded women and men here in the United States and around the world. The Church is bigger than our country and so is spiritual war.

So, we’re going to battle by worshipping through music, lifted hands, etc. and by teaching what both the Bible and science say about abortion and about sex.

Katharine: That’s intriguing. Both the Bible and science.

Cheryl: Yes, both the Bible and science because scientific research supports all the biblical laws about sex–Which is no surprise, right? since God created science.

Katharine: Can you tell me just one thing scientific research has found that supports what the Bible says about sex and abortion?

Cheryl: The hormones that are activated in us when we have sex bond us with our partner. So when people have heterosexual or homosexual sex, they feel bonded to that person. The Bible says, the two shall become one, which is reiterated in 1 Corinthians 6:12-20. When women break that bond, their emotions are affected and often they become depressed or develop anxiety. When men break that bond, they often become jealous ex-boyfriends.

Katharine: Wow. So our bodies were physically designed to operate best when we make a marriage connection to just one person. Alright, shifting gears a little, I’d love to hear what you would say to a woman who has an unplanned pregnancy right now who is thinking about an abortion?

Cheryl: When I had my abortion, I plunged myself into darkness. Even before there was a TV show called “The Walking Dead,” I described myself as the walking dead. I looked alive. I acted happy. But I wasn’t. I was dead inside. When you choose death for what is growing inside of you, you also choose death for yourself and Satan wins. God loves you so much that He doesn’t want the pain of abortion for you.

Katharine: What would you say to a young woman thinking about having sex before getting married?

Michele: As young women, we were told it’s OK to have sex as long as you use birth control. Today they called it “safer” sex. But the Bible doesn’t say that it’s okay to have sex if we use birth control. God says the only way to fully experience the beauty that He made sex to be is to have it with just the one person of the opposite sex to whom you are married. In fact, sex outside marriage is so dangerous–both physically and spiritually–it can scar our bodies, emotions, and spirits forever. Until we ask Jesus to heal those wounds.

Cheryl: The biggest advantage of sexual purity, of course, is obeying God–this is your spiritual act of worship (Romans 12:1) and your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19). When our spirits are pure, we can hear more clearly from the Lord and become like spiritual superheroes. Nothing is impossible for us spiritually. When we live with sin, it’s like Superman meets kryptonite. Sin drains our spiritual power. Sex outside of marriage makes us weaklings spiritually. We can’t hear God, and we can be easily defeated. Sexual purity gives us spiritual super-strength. It keeps our emotions free of deep wounds.

But it also keeps our physical bodies free of so many diseases. For example, HPV is so prevalent now that we have a vaccine for it. Women are biologically more susceptible to HPV than men and get it even if the condom works perfectly.

We need to change the conversation about abortion. We need to talk about abortion and sex more in church than in politics. We need to teach our generation and the generations after us. This is not a young person’s issue. This is a heart issue of all the generations. All the generations need healing. And in a 2 Chronicles 7:14 way, all generations need to repent and seek God’s face if we want revival–and we believe our conferences will spark revival.

Katharine: What about a woman who has already had an abortion, like yourself, Cheryl? What would you say to someone like you?

Cheryl: Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life (John 14:6). If we want life, if we want to stop being the walking dead, then we have to accept Jesus’ love for us. I chose Christ and then later admitted to Him that I was wrong to have an abortion. And He immediately washed away my sins, and I felt clean and alive. You can have that freedom, too. Start with Psalm 51 and then contact your local pregnancy center for a post-abortion healing class. You can also seek a healing ministry or attend one of our conferences.

Katharine: I’ve never had an abortion, but I lost two children in utero, so I understand the guilt and feelings of loss that we feel anytime we lose a pregnancy. And I can also tell you that our children are with God. I believe I will spend eternity with them. And they always have a place in our hearts. Their short lives served a purpose here even if they were never born.

Cheryl: Yes. And our babies love us and forgive us. They are in heaven waiting for their moms. And those babies whose moms do not know Christ are crying. We Christians have got to share the Gospel with post-abortive women so that those babies are consoled and reconciled some day with their mothers in heaven.

Katharine: Amazing work you’re both doing Cheryl and Michele. If someone wanted to find out more about your work, how could they do it?

Cheryl: Our website is MybodyMyworship.org. We’re also on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. We also do MybodyMyworship conferences at churches. You can find out information about how to get involved or how to bring a conference to your church on our website. We honestly believe that worshipping the Lord in this way will spark revival.

I am Cheryl Krichbaum, a wife, a mom, a former web-based training project manager, a prayer warrior, and the founder of MyBodyMyWorship, which you can find on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

I am an outspoken Christian, just telling it like it is. And I have a mission.

My mission is to change the conversation about abortion. Perhaps as a result, Christians will think and talk differently about abortion and then accomplish the Great Commission one hurting woman—and man—at a time.

I firmly believe that the pro-life movement is a Great Commission opportunity:

Why CherylKrichbaum.com?

Naming my website with my name rather than a created name for my ministry provides me the opportunity to write about whatever the Lord places on my heart, even if that’s something other than abortion and purity. For the foreseeable future, though, my posts will address those issues.

Naming my website CherylKrichbaum.com may seem arrogant to you, but for me it’s recognition that “Cheryl Krichbaum” is my Christian name, a name taken in humbleness and gratitude to my Father above.

Cheryl Krichbaum is my married name, the name I took when I married Russ. Just five months before we got married, I chose to have a personal relationship with Christ. That is, I changed from being a Christian by birth to a Christian by choice. I changed from being a hearer of The Word to a doer of The Word. I changed from being a Christian by title to a disciple of Christ.

Russ is my second husband. When I was married the first time (before I became a Christian), I did not change my name. So, until I married Russ (after I became a Christian), I had always had my birth name.

When Russ and I got engaged, I did not want to change my name. I remember that we argued about it. Russ felt emasculated, but I was offended, too. For me, it wasn’t about Russ. It was about wanting to feel valued for me.

Somewhere in those four months that we were engaged, the Lord softened my heart and made me realize that Hewas giving me a new name. So Cheryl Krichbaum not only is my married name, not only the name that I chose, but the name that reflects both Russ’ love for me and God’s love for me.

My Story Exchanged for His Story

Someday you’ll be able to read many more details in my memoir, which I am editing and preparing for publication right now.

I Believe

I believe that we need to change the focus from babies who have no voice to women who are in charge of their own bodies. The pro-choice movement is all about the women, so we need to address their issues head on (know thy audience!). That’s what a true Aristotelian rhetorician would do. That’s what the Apostle Paul, a classical rhetorician, would do. That’s what we need to do, too.

We need to:

focus on saving eternal lives, not just mortal lives.

talk about abortion and sexual integrity more in church than in politics. Why? Because abortion is illegal in most countries throughout the world, yet the abortion rate in those countries is still very high. Yes, we need to de-fund Planned Parenthood. Yes, we need to reverse Roe v Wade. But we also need to understand that the law won’t change hearts. Only Christ can do that.

teach men, women, and children to be obedient to God’s rules about sex. Just think about how many fewer abortions would be “needed” if there were fewer crisis pregnancies.

repent over our own sexual sins and our own silence about abortion and sexual immorality.

help men and women heal from abortion so that they do not abort again and heal from sexual immorality so that they have sex only within marriage.

Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood Director turned pro-life advocate, sent an email about billboards like this one in Cleveland, OH:

It’s disgusting.

I can’t afford billboards, but I can afford social media, which has the potential to reach far more people. So, I’m countering these billboards with social media “billboards.”

But unlike the pro-choice movement, I am making mine personal. Mine don’t say “abortion causes.” Mine focus on the women who have abortions–because abortion does not just affect the baby; it affects the woman. And if you want women to stop aborting, then you need to make the message about them.

If you are on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram, please like and share my billboards @MyBodyMyWorship. Or send the images below via email.

The story of Jesus’ birth actually begins with the story of John the Baptist’s birth.

John’s mother, Elizabeth, was a relative of Mary’s, so John and Jesus were cousins—not first cousins because Elizabeth and Mary were not sisters, but cousins in their larger, extended family.

Elizabeth plays an important role in Mary’s life. She was Mary’s mentor.

But before we talk about Elizabeth mentoring Mary, let’s try to see the story from Elizabeth’s perspective.

Introducing Zacharias and Elizabeth

In the days of Herod, king of Judea, there was a priest named Zacharias, of the division of Abijah; and he had a wife from the daughters of Aaron, and her name was Elizabeth.
Luke 1:5

So what Luke is telling us is that both Zacharias and Elizabeth were of the tribe of Levi. The Levites were the Jewish priests.

Elizabeth is Both Righteous and Barren

They were both righteous in the sight of God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and requirements of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren, and they were both advanced in years.
Luke 1:6-7

So, Elizabeth’s clock had been ticking for some time. She wasn’t beyond childbearing years, that is, she had not yet entered menopause, but she was getting close.

Yet, she had no children.

In the Jewish culture of the time, big families were the norm. To not have children was rare. And as you may recall from my blog post titled, “Abortion & the Bible,” Old Testament Jews valued children.

It could have been that others shamed Elizabeth for not having children, yet she walked blamelessly.

Barrenness

Let me ask you this: Is an inability to have children a curse from God?

I hope you said no!

The answer is in Luke 1:6-7 (quoted above). Both Zacharias and Elizabeth were righteous in the Lord, yet they did not have children.

If Elizabeth’s story is like your story, know that your challenge to conceive or to carry a child to term is not about how good you are.

It’s about furthering God’s kingdom.

God’s Perspective

We all have our stories. We tell our stories from our own perspectives.

“We can’t have kids” is Zacharias and Elizabeth’s story.

“When I will receive greater glory, Zacharias and Elizabeth will have a child” is God’s story.

We can look at every story in the Bible from the perspective of those who were there and from the perspective of God.

Now, our insights won’t be perfect because the culture of the time isn’t like ours today (especially that of the United States) and because it’s challenging to imagine God’s thoughts since He is so much greater than we are; however, taking time to consider other perspectives will help us to understand God.

We can also look at our own stories from our own perspective, from the perspective of others, and from the perspective of God.

It’s a whole new twist on He said/she said.

He Said / She Said

Have you ever told a story from childhood only to hear your parents or your siblings tell the story in a completely different way?

To encourage my older boy to write, we teamed up to write some he said/she said stories. We took the same event and each told the story. It was a great way for him to learn perspective!

Our favorite he said/she said story was about a trip from Minneapolis to Atlanta through Detroit, where we had a 5-hour delay. He absolutely loved that trip because he got to watch videos, explore the airport, ride the tram and the moving sidewalk, and go on a big airplane (777).

He was 7 at the time of this story. My other boy was a potty training toddler. The 7 pm flight ended up being a 12 midnight flight. Can you guess what the trip was like for me?

I carried my bag, my purse, a diaper bag, and a toddler.

I took all of us to the bathroom for diaper changes.

I walked boys in the moving sidewalk and took them on the tram over and over again.

When we finally got on the airplane, the boys wouldn’t go to sleep because they were so excited that they had their very own TV.

When we got to the Atlanta airport, the 2-story escalator going down to the tram was out-of-order. Thankfully it was going down, not up, but it was 3 am, and I was carrying several bags and a toddler!

What my son thought was fun, I thought was exhausting!

My Abortion Story from My Perspective or God’s Perspective

When I think of my own abortion story, I can think about it from my perspective (read “Faces of Abortions“)
OR
from my boyfriend’s perspective
OR
from my parents’ perspective
OR
from God’s perspective.

How does the story change?

She Said

When I had the abortion, I was relieved because I thought the crisis was over.

How else did I feel? Good question. I think that mostly I was angry that I got pregnant. It didn’t seem fair to me that men could have sex without consequences, but women were shamed for being pregnant out of wedlock.

I’m not saying that I was right. Feelings are not right or wrong. They just are.

The United States’ Abortion History from Women’s Rights Perspective or God’s Perspective

When I think of crisis pregnancies and abortion throughout the history of the United States and the world, I can look at it from from the perspectives of women who are worried about bringing a child into this world
OR
from a women’s rights perspective
OR
from God’s perspective.

How does the story change?

She Said

Women’s reasons for aborting are varied. Here are just a few:

I can’t afford to raise a child. My parents will be so disappointed with me. The baby daddy will be so mad. Children put up for adoption feel abandoned and might be abused by their adoptive parents. I have the right to choose.

Again, I am not saying that these are right. They are feelings, mostly feelings of fear.

He Said

God cries for every woman who aborts. God welcomes every aborted baby into heaven.

I am also convinced that God is saddened by women not feeling valued by men even though we are all one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:28).

As for our nation—as for all the nations that have legalized abortion—I’m sure God is angry. He founded the United States based on His commandments, yet as a nation we have decided that murder is okay in some cases and not others.

We need to be the love of Christ to women in their messiness. We are responsible for the Great Commission, and we should think of these women as potential disciples.

Who I am Today

Because most of you don’t know me, let me paint a picture of who I am today. I am married to an evangelical Christian man, Russ, who helps support the airlines so their planes stay in the air and not on the ground—which I know you all appreciate.

I have 2 boys school-age boys—one with Aspergers and one with ADHD. They were in public school until recently, and now I homeschool them both.

I have a bachelors degree in technical communication, and I nearly finished my master’s degree in instructional technology. Before I decided to stay home to raise boys, I was a project manager leading teams to create web-based training for big corporations like Target, Northwest Airlines, and 3M.

A couple years ago, I went back into the workforce at our church until this year when I chose to stay home to homeschool my high schooler.

I am on the prayer team, I am in bible study class Sunday mornings, and I am in a special needs moms’ small group—although I have to admit that my kids’ special needs are so much easier than all my girlfriends’ kids.

But what I love about that group is that they understand that life is hard.

Because, you see, my home while in high school was not easy.

Well, it started easy. I am the spoiled youngest of three. My sister and brother are a bit older than me, so when I was done with 5th grade, they were both off at college, and I was the spoiled only child.

Living in a Home Tormented with Schizophrenia

But in the middle of 10th grade, my sister and her 6-month-old baby boy came home for Christmas and never left. Her husband had left her because she had a mental illness that he couldn’t handle.

Suddenly, I was the neglected middle child.

This situation led to a lot of arguing in my house. As some of you know, having three generations living in the same house is challenging because parents and grandparents don’t always agree on how to raise the child, so you have that natural tension.

Now add a mother who is not doing basic things for her child because she can’t think straight, because she is hearing voices that aren’t there.

It took two years for the doctors to diagnose my sister. She has paranoid schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia is different than multiple personalities disorder. With schizophrenia, you hear voices and have hallucinations. For my sister, she had a “friend” that she talked to in gibberish while pacing. Evidently her “friend” was funny because she would talk and talk and talk, listen, and then laugh.

The priority in my parents’ house was my nephew. And rightly so.

But I didn’t get the attention that I needed as a teenage girl.

My parents missed a musical that I was in because of my sister. They made the best out of a difficult situation, but I was hurt, and my defenses went up.

My parents didn’t ask me about my day or what I was doing at school, so I stopped telling them.

My parents didn’t ask me why I was upset about friendships, so I didn’t share anything with them.

And then I met a guy.

Spending time with him was so much more peaceful than listening to my toddler nephew whine at the dinner table, my mom correct him, and my sister get upset about my mom “interfering” with her parenting—you know, the parenting that she wasn’t doing.

I was home for dinner, but only because my parents required it. I hated being at the dinner table.

But as soon as dinner was over, I took my homework to my boyfriend’s place.

Now, are any of you surprised that I got pregnant?

It was the end of my junior year in high school. Having lived with my nephew for a couple years and all the fighting that happened around parenting him, I had NO interest in raising a child.

I was busy with extracurriculars at school:

I was first chair alto saxophone player in the band.

I was editor of the high school newspaper.

I was a straight-A student.

I did not want the burden of a pregnancy and most especially did not want to see the disapproving looks or hear the disapproving comments of my classmates or my teachers. So I decided to have an abortion.

My mom was so stressed out about my sister and my nephew that my decision to have an abortion seemed like a relief to her.

My dad was distraught, but he never said anything to me until after the abortion. Then he realized that he needed counseling more than I did. I was fine.

My dad was the church choir director. He still is today. He just turned 80, and I’m certain that he will be the choir director until the day he dies.

My mom was a former church organist. She’s a preacher’s kid. She volunteered for everything at church, including leading the children’s choir and teaching Sunday school. Today, she plays handbells at her church.

I had been a leader in the church youth group. I could’ve been the president of the youth group the following year, but Mom and I convinced Dad to leave the church.

This was shortly before I got pregnant. We were so stressed out at home, and our pastor made our church work even more stressful. No one was helping us deal with my sister’s schizophrenia—or at least I didn’t think they were.

Church was a burden. So we left.

In the dozen years that followed, I—

lived with my boyfriend,

bought a house with him, and

married him–in that order. The wrong order.

It was a one-sided marriage in that I loved him, but he didn’t love me—but I didn’t believe in divorce.

I didn’t think that he believed in divorce, either, but after 13 years together, 9 of which we were married, he decided he wanted a divorce.

About a year and a half later, I found the love of Christ. My husband, Russ, is the hero in my salvation story.

We don’t have enough time for me to tell you all those details, but in short, when we met—

I was politically liberal,

pro-choice,

very skeptical of evangelicals, and

I was sure that my politically conservative, evangelical boyfriend would be scared away by my abortion.

He wasn’t. He loved me anyway. He showed me the love of Christ.

And it was because Russ showed me the love of Christ through his acceptance and love of me that I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior.

Faces of Abortion

Now, I want you to stop and think about how you picture the faces of women who have had abortions. Did you picture me?

The angry women that you see in the pro-choice movement are probably faces of abortion. They are faces of pain. They are faces of messy lives.

This last winter, I went on a mission trip through church to Uganda where I had a life-changing conversation with one of the pastors about abortion in Africa and in the United States.

Since returning, the Lord has made it clear that I am to change the conversation about abortion.

Knowing that I was going to go public with my abortion online, I began telling my family and friends so that they would hear about my abortion from me and not by reading it online.

In the process, I have found out that some of my friends have had abortions, too. Turns out that their lives have not been so perfect, either.

You don’t know how many of the faces you see every day belong to women who have had abortions. Have they experienced the love of Christ through you?

Or have they heard judgment as you comment on all the pro-choice mantra that comes from “liberal media” or the Women’s March?

What the Great Commission Means

We seem to forget that the Great Commission (Matt 28:19-20) was told to us disciples, that we are responsible for the Great Commission. When we hear the Great Commission, we hear “go to all nations”…

…but we forget that “nations” means ethnic groups. We forget that Jesus, a Jew Himself, made the Great Commission while in Israel, talking to Jews. He was telling them to make disciples of all the Gentiles—us.

The U.S. is the melting pot of nations, of ethnic groups. The Great Commission is meant for us—as well as all other nations.

Yes, some people are called to go on mission trips. I am. You might not be. But all of us are called to think of every trip

Missionary to McDonald’s

For example, my Sunday morning routine includes going through the McDonald’s drive thru. Now, before you judge our eating habits, know that this quick breakfast allows me to do my prayer walk, take the dog for a run, and get everyone out the door for church without fighting.

There are two women who are usually working in the drive thru–Susan and Gloria. Susan is from India. Gloria is Hispanic. My goal every Sunday morning is to make them smile because I’m sure that they get many grumpy customers. Besides, they got up at 5 am to make breakfast so that I don’t have to.

One day, I hope to have a relationship that allows me to share the gospel. That’s my prayer.

Call me a missionary to McDonald’s!

Share the Love of Christ

So I urge you to share the love of Christ wherever you go. You have no idea what is going on behind those faces.

Your job is to make Christ appealing to them so that others want to accept Christ as their Lord and Savior—even if those others are pro-choice.

Please do not think that I am writing to you from a “holier-than-thou” pedestal. The last thing I want to do is tell the world that I had an abortion.

But I am telling you anyway because I do not want the emotional pain of abortion for you—or for anyone.

What I did was wrong. But I know that the Lord has forgiven me. If you need forgiveness and can’t wait for my blog on that, then go to Psalm 51 and read it as if you wrote it, as if you are saying it to God yourself.

Not only has God forgiven me, but He has also called me to cry loudly, to not to hold back, and to raise my voice like a trumpet (Isaiah 58:1a).

You see, I used to be you. I was raised in the church and yet I had an abortion anyway. I volunteered for Planned Parenthood Action Fund. I counter-protested the Christians who picketed outside an abortion clinic. I voted solely on whether a candidate was pro-choice.

If I had understood the scriptures, I’m sure that I would not have had an abortion. Knowing what I know now about how darkness fell over my life, I do not want that pain for anyone—not you, not your friends, not even my enemies. You are my sisters in Christ!

Ever since the Lord first showed His love for me in very practical ways, I have studied the Bible. He has taught me how to understand the Bible. He has taught me how to pray.

Lord, bless the readers of this blog post in ways that they feel, without doubt, that those blessings came from You. Open their minds to understanding the scriptures (Luke 24:45). Let us remember that You are love (1 John 4:8). You love the world, the whole world (John 3:16). You do not love only the men but also the women. Lord, if any readers do not believe Your love for them, let them read “Part 2: Abortion & the Church,” to see how Your Son, Jesus, lovingly treated the woman at the well and the woman caught in adultery. I ask these things in the name of Jesus. Amen!

Choosing Light Not Darkness

When I had an abortion at age 17, darkness fell over my life. Before “The Walking Dead” became a TV show, I referred to myself as the walking dead because I looked alive. I pretended to be happy. But I had no joy.

I realize this now that I have been called out of darkness and into His marvelous light (1 Peter 2:9) and have received mercy (1 Peter 2:10). I have turned from darkness to light and have received forgiveness (Acts 26:18). Now I have the joy of the Lord (Nehemiah 8:10) and peace that passes all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

You see, when we choose to follow Jesus, we walk in the light (John 8:12). I like it much better here! I invite you to join me so that you, too, can feel the joy of the Lord.

The Word Abortion Is Not in the Bible

You may be thinking, “Well, that’s fine for you, but I know that the Bible doesn’t say anything about abortion.” Since the Bible does not have the word abortion in it, I can see your point. But I ask you to spend some time with me today exploring why pro-life Christians still believe that abortion is wrong in the eyes of the Lord.

For Christianity “is not a blind leap in the dark; faith is a reasoned response to God’s Self revelation” (Dr. Bill Creasy).

You are right that the word abortion is not in the Bible. You can find a lot about sex, money, and repentance in the Bible but not any stories of abortion. Why is that?

Old Testament Jews Valued Children

Let’s remember that the Old Testament was written for Jews, which was a culture that valued children. Because the Jews valued children, there was no reason to instruct them to not end their pregnancies. How do we know they valued children?

We know that they valued children because of King David and Bathsheba’s story. Do you know this story? You may remember that Solomon, who becomes king after David, is Bathsheba’s son, but do you remember that Solomon had an older brother who was born as a result of adultery?

David and Bathsheba’s Story

There are many cool things about David’s story. Everyone knows the gist of the David and Goliath story. Many know that he was anointed king over Israel by Samuel, but many miss that it was another 13 or so years before he actually became king.

Everything about David’s story is interesting. There’s plenty of drama in David’s life to keep you riveted for years. But here we’re going to focus on how David and Bathsheba got together.

At this point in his story, David is king over all of Israel. David stayed home when he should’ve been at the battlefield. He sent all his men to battle while he stayed home (2 Sam 11:1), including Bathsheba’s husband Uriah (2 Sam 11:3, 1 Chron 11:26, 41).

While hanging out on his own rooftop, David saw Uriah’s wife Bathsheba bathing (evidently Uriah’s home was nearby), he summoned her, and he had sex with her. She got pregnant (2 Sam 11:2-5).

What we don’t know is whether David and Bathsheba “had eyes for each other” before this story or whether she had sex with him because he was the king and reasoned that she couldn’t say “no.” My personal opinion, based on how Bathsheba interacts with David throughout their lifetimes, is that they had eyes for each other. But that’s my opinion, not fact.

Today in the United States, you might expect a rich man to offer his mistress money for an abortion or even pressure her into having an abortion. But that’s not what David does.

Why not? Because that’s not what God’s chosen people did.

Instead, David tries to trick Uriah into having sex with his own wife so that he would think that the very large baby born prematurely was his (2 Sam 11:6-8). Uriah doesn’t fall for the trick (2 Sam 11:9-13), so David has him killed in battle (2 Sam 11:14-21).

After Bathsheba mourned the death of Uriah, David married her and she had a son. “But the thing that David had done was evil in the sight of the Lord” (2 Sam 11:27).

The Lord sent Nathan to David to rebuke him for what he had done (2 Sam 12:1). Basically, through Nathan, God says, I gave you everything. “Why have you despised the word of the Lord by doing evil in His sight?” (2 Sam 12:8-9)

In summary, David decided that it was better to kill one of his own mighty men of the armies (1 Chron 11:26, 41) than to kill the pre-born baby boy.

Why? Because the Jews valued children.

And because the Jews valued children, there was no reason to instruct them to not end their pregnancies.

What God Said About the Jew Who Did Not Value Children

Were there Jews who killed their children?

Yes, King Ahaz burned his sons in fire as sacrifices to a foreign god “according to the abominations of the nations whom the Lord had driven out before the sons of Israel” (2 Kings 16:3; 2 Chron 28:3). The nations whom the Lord had driven out were the ethnic groups that lived in the Promised Land while the Jews spent 40 years wandering in the wilderness.

How did God feel about what Ahaz did? The Bible says that Ahaz “did not do right in the sight of the Lord” (2 Kings 16:2; 2 Chron 28:1).

Over 100 years later, the Lord sends Jeremiah to the same location as Ahaz’s blood sacrifices, the “blood of the innocent” (Jeremiah 19:4), and referred to the blood sacrifices as “a thing which I never commanded or spoke of, nor did it ever enter My mind” (Jeremiah 19:5).

If blood sacrifices of children never entered God’s mind, why would abortion?

What are our gods of wood and stone?
Paper money and diamonds, perhaps?
How many times do we women abort babies because of how costly it will be to go through with the pregnancy?

“For when you offer your gifts and make your sons pass through the fire, you defile yourselves with all your idols, even to this day. So shall I be inquired of by you, O house of Israel? As I live,” says the Lord God, “I will not be inquired of by you. What you have in your mind shall never be, when you say, ‘We will be like the Gentiles, like the families in other countries, serving wood and stone.’”
Ezekiel 20:31-32 NKJV

How is it that we expect God to be inquired of by us—that is, why do we expect God to listen to us—when we are bowing to wood and stone gods rather than Him?

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.”
Matthew 6:24 NASB

Bible Shows That Pre-Born Are Children

Now you might be thinking of the argument that the pre-born are not babies or are not human until they are born.

First
Let me ask you this: If I would not have had an abortion, what would have happened? I would have given birth to a baby, a human. Not a dog, not a monkey, but a human baby who would have grown up and today would be 29 years old.

SecondSurely someone before me has quoted to you all sorts of verses that show that God knew people before they were born. Here is the list for you to read on your own:

ThirdThe Law in the Bible (Exodus 21:22-25) says that if two men struggle and strike a pregnant woman in the process, causing harm to the pre-born, then the penalty is a life for a life, that is, his life for the baby’s life.

Fourth
But here’s the best proof that I have heard to date. I learned this from Pastor Lon Solomon of McLean Bible Church. The New Testament was written in Greek, and Pastor Lon points out that the same Greek word brephos is used to refer to:

John the Baptist when he was still in Elizabeth’s womb (Luke 1:41, 44)
AND

babies when the disciples were bringing their children to Jesus so that He could touch them (Luke 18:15-17).

Not sure if you believe me? Read for yourself on the Blue Letter Bible website. Be sure to scroll down for all the uses of brephos.

By Him all things were created both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible (Colossians 3:16a).

The body is not for immorality but for the Lord and the Lord is for the body (1 Corintians 6:13b).

Choose God’s Light & Teach Other Christians To Do the Same

Dear Christian Sister, do not despise the word of the Lord. Do not do evil in His sight. Believe that the Bible demonstrates that God values the lives of children and pre-born babies. As a follower of Christ, He wants you to value the lives of children and pre-born babies, too.

Choose life for yourself.
Teach your daughters and sons to choose life.
Teach all those at your church to choose life.
Choose the Light.

Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not be partakers with them. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord.

Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord.

And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them. For it is shameful even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret.

But all things that are exposed are made manifest by the light, for whatever makes manifest is light. Therefore He says:

“Awake, you who sleep,
Arise from the dead,
And Christ will give you light.”Ephesians 5:6-14 NKJV

We Christians have got to get this right. The Lord cannot use us in the world when we are living like the world (see Romans 12:2; James 4:4).

We Christians have got to stay out of abortion clinics—for where our treasures are, there our hearts are also (Matt 6:21).

If you are conflicted, if you are unsure, if you are considering an abortion, please contact me privately. There’s no judgment here. Let me pray for you. Let me help you find help near you.

I wonder how often our words unintentionally tell young women to abort.

While on a short-term mission trip to Uganda over New Year’s, I met a man who is studying to be a pastor. He sat at the dinner table with our team as we discussed abortion in Uganda and in the U.S.

One of our pastors pointed out that when we tell our daughters not to come home pregnant, we are essentially telling them to go have abortions.

The Ugandan man realized that he had said that very thing to his daughters, so he went home to change the conversation.

A parent’s words are powerful.

That got me thinking. We need to have these same discussions in the U.S. as well as in Uganda about abortion and what we’re saying to women. The mission field is not just outside of the U.S. (See part 1 of this blog series, “Abortion & the Great Commission.”)

Changing the Way We Talk

As followers of Christ, we need to change the way that we talk and to encourage others to do the same because we are unintentionally telling women to have abortions.

When we pro-lifers talk about abortion, we typically talk about the babies who are dying. U.S. politics are so polarized on the abortion issue that pro-choicers hear everything we have to say as yelling.

When has yelling convinced anyone to accept Christ’s gift of eternal salvation?

From their perspective, all we seem to care about are saving babies, but what about the women?
Are we caring for them through the pregnancy?
Are we supporting them as single moms?
Are we walking alongside them through open adoption?

After all, who is making the decision to abort?

The women, of course!

So, let’s consider how we might be telling women to have abortions.

How We Unintentionally Tell Teens to Have Abortions

My best friend in high school got pregnant about the same time that I did. I was at the top of my high school class. My best friend who is smarter than me and graduated ahead of me chose life. I didn’t.

For her, standing up for her daughter was her ticket out of her parents’ house. She wasn’t going to let her daughter grow up in an abusive home. So, she moved out and into an apartment and finished high school by doing all her classes as dual enrollment at the local university. She advocated for herself and for her daughter.

Her high school counselor told her she had to go to the district’s alternative school—top of the class and they wanted to send her away. Let me ask you—How is that different than saying “If you want to stay here, you have to have an abortion”?

“We teach our students about the beauty of marriage and that sex inside of marriage is one of the things that is beautiful about marriage,” he said.

But while the school reaffirmed its decision, antiabortion groups have rallied to support Runkles. They argue that by singling out a pregnant student, the school is making it more likely that young women will choose abortion rather than suffer embarrassment and punishment.

Yes, exactly that.

And then there’s the inequality:

“It’s because I’m pregnant and you can see the results of my mistake,” Runkles said in a telephone interview Wednesday.

“There have been kids who have broken the student code and they could have hurt people or even gone to jail and they only received an in-school suspension and they’re allowed to walk this year.

As for me and my story, I was hard hearted. It was my decision. No one pressured me to have an abortion, but no one told me not to, either.

Accidental Words

So, let me ask you. What have you said to your children about abortion? You may not have children of your own, but you may have children by volunteering in the children’s ministry or with youth or young adults at your church—because your church is a family, right?

Maybe we are so rigid about “no sex before marriage” that our kids are afraid to tell us that they are pregnant.

Maybe we say, “Don’t ruin your life” by having children when you’re young as if being a mom or putting a child up for adoption is the end of your education and career—because it’s not! God’s strength in us is bigger!

How do we need to change the conversation in our homes and in our churches?

In order to change the conversation, we need to talk about our messy lives, shed light on them—get them out of the darkness and into the light. Take away the power of Satan.

Telling Our Stories to Our Children

Last spring on Good Friday, my husband and I sat down with our boys, ages 13 and 9, and told them our stories of choosing Jesus, including what our lives were like before and how we have changed. **And let me be clear: Abortion is my story, not my husband’s. My husband is the Christian hero in my story!**

Until that night, our boys only knew us as we are now and what we value today. Before we told them, they did not know that we were not always moral people.

It was hard. It was embarrassing. But they were very understanding and forgiving.

I told them that I felt like I had been keeping secrets from them and that I didn’t like that feeling. They both hugged me!

Now that it’s all out in the open, there’s no shame. We took our sins out of the darkness and brought them into the light where Satan no longer has power.

And guess what? Now our boys ask us more questions. We have frank conversations through our bible studies (because the Bible has a lot to say about sex!). Through our discussions of tough questions, we guide them into being the men whom God wants them to be.