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About Me

is an unapologetic, bleeding-heart liberal who writes about everything from politics to private parts. A TV-writer in a former life, her credits include "Big Spender" for Animal Planet,and "A Child Too Many," "Cradle of Conspiracy" & "Deceived By Trust," for Lifetime

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Anthony Weiner has asked for a leave of absence from Congress so he can enter treatment for “looking for love in all the wrong places.”

Calls for his resignation came fast and furious (pun intended) after information surfaced on Friday that Weiner had also been exchanging tweets with a 17-year-old Delaware girl.At his news conference earlier in the week, Weiner had been asked if he had corresponded with any girls who were underage and replied that while that wasn’t his intent, all he could go by was what they put in their profiles.

Because no one ever lies in those.

The congressman denies that there was anything “explicit or indecent” about his exchanges with the Delaware teen, but then he seems to have a very loose interpretation along those lines.

I sincerely wish him well. Though, as yet, I don’t believe any cure has been found for stupidity.

###

Meanwhile, Weiner’s wife might want to take a page from Elizabeth Edwards’ playbook…

Revenge – It doesn’t get any SUH-WEETER than this...

"Keep smiling, douchebag. Your ass is mine."

It’s been reported that just before she died, Elizabeth recorded a secret videotape detailing everything she knew about John’s affair with Reille Hunter and his illegal attempts to cover it up and… wait for it... upon her death had it delivered to the very prosecutors who have now charged him with multiple violations of campaign finance laws – nailing his cheating ass as he prepares to stand trial on charges that could land him behind bars.

Sarah Burge, aka “Human Barbie,” gave daughter Poppy a $10,000 voucher for breast implants to be redeemed when she’s 16, the legal age for such surgery in Britain.“Poppy begged me for a boob job,” the mother of the year explained.

Poppy herself couldn’t be happier:"I can't wait to be like Mummy with big boobs. They're pretty.”

And really, isn’t that what we all just want for our children?For them to be happy.

The 50-year-old has reportedly spent more than $800,000 on her own plastic surgeries and plans to have her daughter watch her next series of treatments.

Won’t little Poppy have some fun stuff to share during “show and tell” time?

“I get angry when strangers say I'm a bad mother.…”

Now why would anyone say that?

“I'm just supporting her and making her dreams come true."

Of course you are. And I'm sure her shrink will thank you in the coming years for putting his kids through college.

###

This week’s “You Can’t Make This Shit Up Award” goes to the fine state of Kansas…

Blind as the proverbial bat, but still want to exercise your God-given, Second Amendment guaranteed, right-wing-nut-case-preserved right to bear arms?Come on down!

Changes to that state’s concealed-carry law now prevent the state from denying gun permits if applicants "suffer from a physical infirmity which prevents the safe handling of a weapon."Gone is the requirement that those wanting to renew their licenses had to take a test to show they could hit at least 18 of 25 targets from distances of nine to 30 feet.

Kansas Democrat Paul Davis said, “You certainly hope it doesn’t take some kind of tragedy to see that we perhaps have made some mistakes in how we’ve changed this law.”

While his Republican colleague Richard Carlson, said, “Law-abiding citizens should be able to decide for themselves whether they are capable of carrying a concealed weapon.”

People applying for gun permits for the first time are still required to take the close-range proficiency test, but if Carlson has his way, that pesky requirement will be eliminated, as well.

“We tend to look for all the reasons why someone should not be qualified to carry concealed, but actually I think we should look for the reasons why they should be qualified,” he said.

Damn right!I know I feel safer knowing there are blind fuckers out there packing heat.

###

And finally, if only Anthony Weiner had purchased the penis disguise kit, we all might have been saved from the events of the past week…

With Father’s Day right around the corner, this non-traditional gift is sure to delight the entire family.

Anthony Weiner has asked for a leave of absence from Congress so he can enter treatment for “looking for love in all the wrong places.”

Calls for his resignation came fast and furious (pun intended) after information surfaced on Friday that Weiner had also been exchanging tweets with a 17-year-old Delaware girl.At his news conference earlier in the week, Weiner had been asked if he had corresponded with any girls who were underage and replied that while that wasn’t his intent, all he could go by was what they put in their profiles.

Because no one ever lies in those.

The congressman denies that there was anything “explicit or indecent” about his exchanges with the Delaware teen, but then he seems to have a very loose interpretation along those lines.

I sincerely wish him well. Though, as yet, I don’t believe any cure has been found for stupidity.

###

Meanwhile, Weiner’s wife might want to take a page from Elizabeth Edwards’ playbook…

Revenge – It doesn’t get any SUH-WEETER than this...

"Keep smiling, douchebag. Your ass is mine."

It’s been reported that just before she died, Elizabeth recorded a secret videotape detailing everything she knew about John’s affair with Reille Hunter and his illegal attempts to cover it up and… wait for it... upon her death had it delivered to the very prosecutors who have now charged him with multiple violations of campaign finance laws – nailing his cheating ass as he prepares to stand trial on charges that could land him behind bars.

Sarah Burge, aka “Human Barbie,” gave daughter Poppy a $10,000 voucher for breast implants to be redeemed when she’s 16, the legal age for such surgery in Britain.“Poppy begged me for a boob job,” the mother of the year explained.

Poppy herself couldn’t be happier:"I can't wait to be like Mummy with big boobs. They're pretty.”

And really, isn’t that what we all just want for our children?For them to be happy.

The 50-year-old has reportedly spent more than $800,000 on her own plastic surgeries and plans to have her daughter watch her next series of treatments.

Won’t little Poppy have some fun stuff to share during “show and tell” time?

“I get angry when strangers say I'm a bad mother.…”

Now why would anyone say that?

“I'm just supporting her and making her dreams come true."

Of course you are. And I'm sure her shrink will thank you in the coming years for putting his kids through college.

###

This week’s “You Can’t Make This Shit Up Award” goes to the fine state of Kansas…

Blind as the proverbial bat, but still want to exercise your God-given, Second Amendment guaranteed, right-wing-nut-case-preserved right to bear arms?Come on down!

Changes to that state’s concealed-carry law now prevent the state from denying gun permits if applicants "suffer from a physical infirmity which prevents the safe handling of a weapon."Gone is the requirement that those wanting to renew their licenses had to take a test to show they could hit at least 18 of 25 targets from distances of nine to 30 feet.

Kansas Democrat Paul Davis said, “You certainly hope it doesn’t take some kind of tragedy to see that we perhaps have made some mistakes in how we’ve changed this law.”

While his Republican colleague Richard Carlson, said, “Law-abiding citizens should be able to decide for themselves whether they are capable of carrying a concealed weapon.”

People applying for gun permits for the first time are still required to take the close-range proficiency test, but if Carlson has his way, that pesky requirement will be eliminated, as well.

“We tend to look for all the reasons why someone should not be qualified to carry concealed, but actually I think we should look for the reasons why they should be qualified,” he said.

Damn right!I know I feel safer knowing there are blind fuckers out there packing heat.

###

And finally, if only Anthony Weiner had purchased the penis disguise kit, we all might have been saved from the events of the past week…

With Father’s Day right around the corner, this non-traditional gift is sure to delight the entire family.