Thanksgiving Vs. Christmas is now one for the history books. Amazing, incredible, fantastic night. It was so much fun, everyone involved was super professional and just nailed all of their parts. Molly wrote a dozen amazing, funny, sweet songs in such a short time, each one perfectly matching the artist who performed it. Josh and Joseph wrote and directed a hilarious script which kept us all in stitches. Then everyone learned their songs and their parts perfectly, in such a short time, with only just a couple of full run-throughs, and then it was time to take it to the stage. And it was just awesome. And I got to hang out with and be in the backing band for Kevin Murphy, someone who I've been a fan of for over 20 years. Kevin is a nice, funny, crazy man who brought the awesome: his number was just bonkers good. The night was perfect, beautiful, and surreal.

I'm especially glad there were two shows. During the second show, because I was more relaxed, I was able to get more swept up in the emotion of it all, and to enjoy and savor it. There were moments I got a little bit choked up, feeling so happy and proud to be a part of such a great group of performers.

Note: Kevin's suit was tailored. By a professional tailor. I am not kidding. (Marian's bro is a tailor, you see)

"It's Thanksgiving Versus Christmas, Hooray!"

Best part is that this is all getting made into an album, which you can pre-order right here! We even made the second show's audience sit through a few re-takes of some little bits just so we could get everything just right. They seemed to really enjoy it (I hope)!

That's our last gig for 2014, gang. See you on our next scheduled trip 'round the sun. Monkey out.

We are at Orycon at the moment, getting ready for a concert tonight. It's been a great con so far! We are being well taken care of and the Filking has been excellent! We (and Sunnie) fully intend to kick some serious ass at tonight's big-ballroom concert. Be there if you can!

I haven't posted since we went to Germany for FilkCONtinental, an awesome German Filk con. Well, that trip was amazing in so many ways...

First of all, we got to spend a day at my new favorite geek obsession, Miniatur Wunderland. I loved analyzing all of the intricate technology that makes the place so interesting. It's more than just a giant train set; they've also got ships navigating actual waterways, fire trucks that respond to emergencies, and a completely functional airport with airplanes that take off and land and taxi to and from the gates. Check out this video and this video and be amazed. We stayed there an entire day until we were dead of exhaustion, and still only saw a fraction of the things to see. If you have the means, I highly recommend making a visit. If you want to know how they did all of that incredible automation, have a look at the Gerrit's Diary videos which detail the construction of the mind-boggling airport section (the videos have English subtitles available).

FilkCONtinental itself was amazing and wonderful, too! Here's a video from it, which ended up being one of the most incredible things we've ever experienced (look toward the end of the song when Kirstin pans the camera around to the audience):

As if that weren't enough, now that we're back, we're getting geared up for something even more amazing, and it's happening in just over a week! Our friend Molly Lewis has teamed up with Josh A. Cagan and Joseph Scrimshaw, and written a brand new all-star musical with all new songs! We will be the "house band" for a significant part of the show, backing up many of the performers as they perform Molly's new songs as part of the show (and backing up ourselves as well). This is going to be an incredible night, the lineup of fantastic performers includes:

Thanks so much to everyone who came out to Wayward to celebrate Sereniversary! This week, we're heading out to Germany for FilkCONtinental and a little R&R. Exciting!

If you haven't heard already, the November 19th event that I was hinting at before has been publicly announced. It's an All-star Triple Door show with Molly! Think of it like one of those great old TV holiday variety specials, but with musicians that you like. ("Hey everybody, look who showed up, it's Marian Call!") And instead of being cooped up in your house staring at the TV, you're out on the town, seeing a show and having fantastic food at a swank dinner theater, the coolest venue around. And there are two shows, too, a 7pm all-ages show and a 10pm 21+ show, for maximum festive! I'm particularly excited to see Kevin Murphy up close, I hear he's got superpowers.

Though the Triple Door's web site seems to have and-the-rest'd us, be assured that Vixy and I and Betsy and Sunnie shall be part of the show, performing backup-band duties for some of the artists in the lineup, and we'll be backing ourselves up at some point, too. Molly and Josh Cagan are writing all the songs and text, and I'm excited to see what they've got in store for us.

I just looked at the calendar, and was amazed at how quickly time keeps on slippin' into the future. The Wayward Sereniversary celebration is this very weekend! So soon? YES, SO SOON! It's this Saturday September 20th! Our beloved Sunnie will be joining us on fiddle, and it's going to be a blast! Come join us!

Then the following weekend we jet off to FilkCONtinental with Betsy and Sunnie! What crazy person scheduled a Germany trip right after a Wayward gig? Oh right, it was me.

But wait! There's more! Before we stick a fork in 2014 and call it done, there's something special coming up after Orycon that we want you all to be a part of. We don't have all the i's crossed and the t's dotted yet, but you're going to want to save the evening of Wednesday, November 19th on your calendar for something we're cooking up with someone we know. Trust me on this one... you really want to save this date. More details to come!

We're playing at the annual Can't Stop The Serenity screening, run by the Seattle Browncoats Charities, with proceeds to benefit Equality Now and MOHAI. This is coming up soon, on Saturday July 19th at 7pm. This will be awesome because it's dinner theater with a full menu, at Central Cinema! Doors open at 6:30 pm, Vixy & Tony (just the two of us) will play a short set, then the movie screening will happen at 8 pm. There will be a costume contest, too, so come as your favorite Firefly character!

Late addition! We're opening for Outdoor Trek on July 26th! Sunnie will be with us, and we're counting on her to bring her namesake along! We will play at 6pm and Trek happens at 7. The show is in a small amphitheater-like spot at the North end of Blanche Lavizzo Park, at 22nd and Yesler. The show is free, but bring some cash to stuff in their donation jars! If they do the same thing as they did last year, the jars are labeled with Trek episodes, and the jar with the most money is the episode they pick the following year.

If you haven't seen Outdoor Trek before, you really should! Whether you come to see us open for them on the 26th, or see them at one of the other times that they're playing during the surrounding weekends (Trek happens 7pm on the Saturdays, and at 2pm on the Sundays, between July 19th and August 3rd this year), you really should go, they're awesome! Each summer, they turn a Trek episode into a wonderfully low-tech stage play with a gender-bent cast. Their prop gags always slay me, like, using Silly String to represent the "love pollen" from This Side of Paradise. This summer the episode will be Mirror, Mirror, and I'm really looking forward to seeing it, considering it's the one I "voted" for last year. Come join us!

Then we will be whisked off to Germany, where we will be the Guests of Honor at FilkCONtinental, the annual German filk convention! This will happen the weeked of October 3-5, in Wernigerode. We'll have both Betsy and Sunnie with us, so this is going to be an amazing trip!

Then finally, we will be the Musical Guests of Honor at Orycon in Portland! This will be the weekend of November 7-9, at the Portland Doubletree. We'll have Sunnie playing fiddle and generally being awesome! We don't know exactly what time/day we'll be playing yet, so if you're coming, remember that con schedules are tricky!

Norwescon is less than a week away! How did that happen? We've been busy changing all our passwords thanks to the Heartbleed exploit, while I'm simultaneously trying to set up a new audio interface, and a new computer which I'll be using for audio recording and also to be used as our songbook tablet.

We have three, count 'em, three, shows to play at Norwescon, all of them with Betsy and Sunnie! First up will be the Vixy & Tony concert, on Friday April 18th at 8:30 in the Evergreen 1 & 2 rooms at Norwescon. We are hoping to debut a brand new song at this concert! That will be followed by our good friend Seanan McGuire's concert shortly thereafter, and we will be her backup band, natch. We're not sure exactly how we'll split the two sets yet, maybe there will be a break between the two sets, or maybe we'll just play straight through, and plug in a new lead singer when appropriate. Then, the following night, we will be doing backup band duties for Molly Lewis, on Saturday, April 19th at 10pm in the same place, Evergreen 1 & 2. See you there!

There will also be other fantastic musical acts to catch while at Norwescon, many of them are our friends and we want you to go see them too, because we think they're awesome! In particular, there will be Hello, the Future! on Friday at 7pm in Evergreen 1 & 2 (right before us), there will be The Doubleclicks on Saturday at 9pm in Evergreen 1 & 2 (right before Molly), and on Friday afternoon, there will be the amazing Heather Dale Band in Grand Ballroom 3 at 3pm, featuring our beloved Betsy Tinney on cello!

Here's the entire Norwescon schedule for all the details of all the great stuff to see at the con. And as always, remember that the schedules of cons can get a bit fibbly-wibbly timey-wimey, so some of the details I've listed above might change as the weekend plays out.

One of the best parts of all these Norwescon concerts is that there will be live streams for most of them! For those who can't make it to the con, you can watch them right here. And if you want to make a donation to help support these live streams, you can donate to the videographer right here. K is our friend and we love him, and needs the support!

Coming up in May, we'll be at Wayward, on the night of May 17th at 8pm, with Betsy and Sunnie. Can't stop the signal!

Conflikt is coming up this weekend! It's going to be fiddle-tastic, with our favorite violinists (Amy and Sunnie) as the GOH and Toastmaster, respectively. Vixy and I will be in the backup band for concerts by Sunnie, Betsy, and Kaede during the weekend, and we'll be participating in circles and generally enjoying the con overall. And we're really excited to see Tim Griffin again, he's one of our faves.

We're still slowly recovering from that amazing concert we did with Betsy recently. Release The Cello, and its corresponding release-concert party, was successfully unleashed upon a ravenous audience, and the energy was just amazing. Ten performers mixed together in a three-set show, and we really pulled it off. Everyone involved in the show was absolutely at the top of their game, everyone was just flawless and amazing. We had such a fantastic time!

Evidence of the fantastic time is hereby presented in the form of a special video from my POV. Fishy, for a long time, has been wanting to use his Google Glass device to record what it's like to be a hyperactive bouncy part-squirrel guitarist on stage. Well, we picked a good night on which to perform that particular experiment: we were really on fire, and there were at least ten people on stage. Warning: you might want to take your Dramamine or Bonine before pressing Play on this video:

Coming up, we're trying to settle on another date at Wayward, and we're going have a concert at Norwescon! The Norwescon show will probably on the Friday afternoon or evening, and also we'll be playing backup band for Seanan and Molly there, but I'm not putting it on our official calendar yet, until we get a solid schedule in our hands. It'll pop up on our calendar shortly once we get solid confirmations. See you there!

This is going to be an amazing show to celebrate the release of our favorite cellist's first solo album, Release The Cello! And while a concert of just Betsy would be awesome, we couldn't just leave her all alone up there, could we? This concert is going to be massive! Sure you'll get plenty of Betsy's solo music, but you're also going to get so much more: Sooj and Alec will be there, so you'll get the Full Pixie, as it were. Throw in some Jeff and Maya (they're flying up here special for this event), some Sunnie fiddling, and of course, a bit of Vixy & Tony, and that makes a pretty full house!

And yes, for certain parts of the show, we're going to try to get everyone on stage at once. Does anyone know what the weight rating is for the stage there at Kenmore? Should we ask for a bowl of M&M's?

Thanks everyone for coming out to Wayward on Saturday! We had an absolute blast!

Got an interesting surprise in my email inbox just now: A fan at Saturday's show bought a CD from us, and when they got it home and stuck it into their CD player, it played the wrong band. This is clearly a manufacturing error of some kind, but we'd like to know if this was a widespread problem. This is the first and only time that I've ever gotten a report like this, so I'm hoping it's just a one-off problem.

I think it would be a safe assumption that anyone who bought our album would let us know right away if something similar had happened to them. But in case you encountered the same issue and just haven't contacted us yet, please let us know right away by clicking here and sending us an email. Thanks!

Wayward show this weekend! It's Wayward's annual Sereniversary Shindig, this coming Saturday, September 28th! Party starts at 6pm, music starts at 7pm. There are also plans for trivia and a costume contest, so dress up! We will be accompanied by the wonderful Betsy and Sunnie, for all your string section needs!

Last weekend was spent in the studio, with a bunch of new recording gear, a rented drum kit, and a willing drummer. We tracked drums for six songs destined for the next Vixy & Tony album. There are still a couple of songs left to get percussion for, but for now, I've got my work cut out for me with comping, mixing, and additional guitar overdubs. I'm so very tired, but it was a great weekend with good friends. Brian was awesome, and this record is going to sound great.

Thank you everyone, who made last weekend's Wayward show awesome and fun! We had a fantastic time!

I (Tony, that is) will be playing guitar for the incredible Molly Lewis, as well as the equally awesome Betsy and Katie Tinney, at Soulfood Books in Redmond, this coming Saturday June 29th at 7:30pm. Vixy will be out of town by then, just having left for an adventure. Come see why everyone loves Molly so much!

Hey folks! We've got a Wayward show coming up soon! We'll be playing Saturday, June 22nd, 2013 at 7pm, accompanied by the amazing talents of our good friends Betsy and Sunnie! No promises until after rehearsal, but we're working on an arrangement of another crazy rock cover tune y'all can headbang and dance to. (Shhh.)

The wayward show is the pre-screening shindig in conjunction with the 2013 Can't Stop The Serenity event, put on by the awesome Seattle Browncoats. Although we're not playing at CSTS itself, and the CSTS screening itself is actually a few weeks later, on July 13th, you should all definitely go to that screening! As always, the screening is always great fun, there are other fun acts that are participating, and proceeds go to benefit Equality Now, Northwest Harvest, and other charities.

And then, we've also already got Sereniversary booked at Wayward, coming up on September 28th, so mark your calendars!

In the meantime, work proceeds apace on our second album. We are doing recording of drums in the very near future, a new song is being written, and life is good!

We're gearing up for ECCC this weekend! Are you all excited? Hey, remember last year when we did that awesome and fun thing with those people? There's a chance we might do it (or some similar subset of it) again this year, too. If we do, there's a chance it might happen on Sunday, so if you want to witness it, you must keep your eyes on each of our various Twitter feeds to see if that's something that's going to happen!

Next weekend, I'll be playing guitar for Marian Call on Saturday and Sunday, March 9th and 10th, check her web site for all the details.

Hey! We're coming back to Wayward! Our show there will be Saturday, March 23rd, 2013 at 7pm. We'll have our beloved Betsy and Sunnie with us! We've also got some other Wayward shows in the works later in the year, too! Come see us, and have tasty vegan treats too!

But first...

Conflikt is coming up in just one week! With our dear friends the incredible Jeff and Maya Bohnhoff as the guests of honor! They're awesome! They don't come to Seattle very often, so you should take advantage of this rare opportunity. You're all coming, right? RIGHT?!?

I had a lot of fun working with Betsy and Sunnie on this one. If you're wondering what our second album is going to sound like, this is a taste of how the songs are sounding in the studio with our string section. Please comment below and let us know what you think of this new version of the song!

A note about how Bandcamp handles downloads: We want the song to be free to download, however, Bandcamp only lets 200 people download a free song per calendar month, after that, it switches to paid. So what we've done is put the song up as a name-your-own-price song, and if you want to be one of those 200 people, put in zero for your price. If you want to let someone else be one of those 200 people, put in something for the price. At least, I think that's how it works. Please let us know if you encounter any problems with Bandcamp.

Our first show coming up is Shiny Happy Holidays, in Santa Monica, on the night of Saturday December 8th, and it's four acts in one evening: Hello, The Future!, Eben BrooksLogan Heftel, and of course, Vixy & Tony! There will also be an auction and other things! This is going to be a great show, but we don't know anyone in LA, so we need your help boosting the signal! Please tweet and blog and facebook about this show so that everyone in LA knows about it!

Our second show this December will be on the afternoon of Sunday, December 16th at 2:30pm, as part of GeekFest! We'll be playing with our beloved Betsy and Sunnie, in a massive theater with tons of space! Other acts for the weekend include the aforementioned Hello, The Future! and Eben Brooks, as well as the hard rocking Kirby Krackle, the comedy of Nerdprov, and other amazing acts! Geekfest runs all weekend, and they'll be putting up their final schedule at their web site soon! Get your tickets now, bring all your friends, and let's fill the place up!

Both of December's shows are put on by Browncoat organizations (CA and Seattle), and both of them benefit their favorite charities. What better way to spend time in December?

In the meantime, I'm closing in on the final mix of our re-record of No Hurry, and it's wonderful, it's full of Betsy and Sunnie goodness, you'll love it! And we're going to release it for free! Very soon now!

Back home safe from OVFF! As we were flying Westward from Chicago, we could see the wall of cloud from the approaching edge of the storm system surrounding hurricane Sandy. I hope that all of our friends on the East coast are safe and dry! Chime in and let us know how you're doing.

Tonight, we're going to be rehearsing with Betsy for our concert at Orycon this weekend, we're really looking forward to it! Who's coming?

But finally! Details about the December 8th Browncoat show in LA! We're calling it Shiny Happy Holidays, and it's a collection of four greatmusicalacts, an auction, and other stuff! It's going to be so much fun! The problem is, we don't know anyone in LA except Hello, The Future, so we need your help getting the word out! Are you in LA or do you have friends in LA? Tell them about this! Blog and tweet about this!

Well, OVFF is being awesome this weekend so far. There was a somewhat difficult travel day to get here, where we arrived at the flight gate to depart and they had closed the airplane door seven minutes prior. But the helpful United agents rebooked us on a flight that got us here just barely before the Pegasus concert started, and everything came off smoothly. Vixy was a bit frazzled around the edges, and had to retire early on Friday night, but things are looking good for the filk circles tonight so far.

In particular, it was nice to meet Hello, The Future! in person and see her perform, there's going to be a lot more of her in our sphere of attention coming up in December, where we'll be doing GeekFest with her on the 15th and an LA show on the 8th (details still pending on that one).

But of course, the big news is the Pegasus Awards, and it was a great banquet and ceremony, with, amazingly, two tie awards:

Best SongCheshire KittenS.J. Tucker

Best Classic SongTiberius RisingAdam English and Rand Bellavia

Best Writer/Composer (tie)Juanita CoulsonDr. Mary Crowell

Best Performer (tie)Betsy TinneyWild Mercy

Best Gaming SongI Put My Low StatDr. Mary Crowell

Best Travel SongNo HurryMichelle Dockrey

I'm deeply proud to call the people on that list (variously) my loved ones, partners, collaborators, fellow performers, and friends.

We're getting packed to head off to OVFF this weekend. And I'm really sad that Betsy and Sunnie can't come. But! I got to work with them in the studio last weekend, and WOW, were they awesome.

They're the kind of players that you can just sit in front of a microphone and magic comes out. They came up with the most delightful parts, laying down something like six tracks total in just a few hours. I don't ever try to write parts for them to play, they are just so wonderful at coming up with beautiful material on their own. That means that when I record them on a song, it will always have their distinctive signatures and creativity baked right in. That just thrills me, because it means that in the end, the song takes on new textures that I didn't even know were there. I feel so honored that they enjoy doing that for our songs. And I love them dearly.

Coming up, Vixy & Tony & Betsy are playing a concert at Orycon very soon, with Katie opening. There's GeekFest in December, and keep an eye on our schedule this weekend for details about the LA show on December 8th!

We're getting ready for Archon this weekend! We've got two concerts planned out, one on Friday evening and one on Saturday afternoon, in two different locations. Panels and Filk circles too! Peek at the convention's programming grid for all the details.

We're going to go to OVFF as regular attendees in a couple of weeks, then after that it's Orycon at the beginning of November.

Then, in December, there will be GeekFest in Seattle, and a Browncoat holiday show in LA on December 8th! (Details about the LA show coming soon!)

Hey everybody! We're back at Wayward! It's Sereniversary this weekend! We'll play some music, Broenwynn will do some Whedon trivia, and there will be a Firefly costume contest with prizes! Are you coming? Who will you be dressing as?

Also: There might (depending on a couple of IF's) be something Jade at the merch table! Crossing our fingers!

In the meantime, in the studio, we're re-recording No Hurry to fix a lyric issue, and simultaneously take advantage of the opportunity to add additional awesome to the song. We'll offer it up for free download once it's done!

Welcome to my running book post for 2015! This will appear at the top of my blog until 2015 is over.

THERE WILL BE SPOILERS. Probably.

1-3. Chaos Choreography, by Seanan McGuire. (InCryptid series #5.) YES I READ IT THREE TIMES. Yes it counts. Such is the life of an editor. Fortunately for me (and also for Seanan), I loved it! Verity is back, plus Dominic, plus mice! Plus some old family members and some new cryptids. And, as usual, some not-so-nice people. And since it's Verity, some dancing. You'll love it! Comes out in spring of 2016. I can't wait!

4. Mr. Churchill's Secretary, by Susan Elia MacNeal. I think I grabbed this on a whim during a book store trip; I'm trying to make a point of reading more books by women, and I love a good period mystery. This did not disappoint! I'm a fan of Laurie R. King's work, and this hit a similar spot for me. It's less a murder mystery and more a spy novel, but it's a great period piece, and it touches on the sexism of the period and also the atmosphere of London during the blitz.

Maggie Hope was born in Britain, raised in America, and has returned to Britain to take care of some family business. As the war starts, she stays to help out her country of citizenship; she has a university degree in mathematics and is far more qualified than any of the men in the cryptography department, but since she's a woman, they'll only hire her as one of the Prime Minister's typists. That doesn't stop her from doing what she can to help the war effort, uncovering a German plot and unraveling a family mystery in the process.

I really enjoyed this. And just now I noticed it's listed as "Maggie Hope series #1" which means YAY there's more of these! BRB going to buy books!

5. Three Bags Full: A Sheep Detective Story, by Leonie Swann. Another book I grabbed on a whim. I adored this! So at first the premise sounds ridiculously cheesy-- a shepherd is found dead, and his flock of sheep try to solve the mystery of who killed him. I half expected it to be an animal-based parody of Agatha Christie, but although there is a sheep called Miss Maple, that's as far as the parody aspect goes.

While the book does stretch reality as far as positing that sheep can talk to each other, and can understand humans talking, it doesn't go the way of most talking-animal narratives, where it's assumed that if animals were sentient, they'd think just like humans do. George's sheep do know a lot more words than the average sheep, because he would read aloud to them every day and explain the meanings of some words, but they're still sheep; they still think like sheep, and look at the world from the point of view of their own experiences and priorities. They don't, for example, instantly grasp metaphors they've never heard before; when someone mentions the "black sheep" being gone, they wonder why the person wants Othello (a four-horned black ram) gone. They don't understand religion or even realize there's any such thing: when the village preacher talks of "lost lambs" they wonder which lambs he means; when they encounter a graveyard they think it's a strange garden; when the preacher calls his church "the house of God" they conclude that since it seems to be his house, "God" must be his name. Everything you witness is from the sheeps' point of view, and sometimes that means it takes a while to parse out what's actually going on and what it means to the human characters.

It's difficult to explain just how absolutely charming this book is. It's also a fascinating thought experiment about animals being sentient and how they'd think if they were. One of the blurbs on the back puts it really well: "It's rather as if Agatha Christie had rewritten The Wind in the Willows". Originally posted at http://vixy.dreamwidth.org/793847.html.

I stopped eating meat about fifteen years ago. It's easiest to say it was for religious reasons, although not from any organized religion, just from the patchwork of Protestant-turned-new-age beliefs that my mother and aunt raised me with. A hodgepodge of books and seminars and Biblical reinterpretations and things "remembered" in meditations that was the core of my life from my single-digits to... well that's another story, never mind. Anyway.

Around fifteen years ago, my mother decided to stop eating meat, because at the time we believed that death was unnatural-- any death, human or animal. Death had been brought to this world by... well let's not go into how it got here, but we believed that all life was originally intended to transform (something to do with emotion and vibrations), taking the body with us rather than leaving it behind. Death was a trauma, and one day my mother decided she didn't want to ingest anything that had <i>experienced</i> that trauma, taking in its negative emotion and energy. (My aunt didn't go fully vegetarian at that time, but did drastically reduce the amount of meat she ate.) She told my sister and me about it, but she said she didn't expect us to do the same. My sister decided not to. But I idolized my mother and aunt. I believed everything they taught me. I decided to do it too.

After nine or ten years, and various life events, I no longer subscribed to the beliefs I'd grown up with. But I kept being vegetarian, because by that point, if I accidentally ate anything made with meat-- even broth-- I'd suffer nasty gastrointestinal reactions. (I'll never forget thinking I was safe ordering macaroni & cheese at a fancy downtown restaurant, only to wake up in pain at 2am and spend the next few hours in the bathroom. I called the restaurant the next day. "Soooo... any chance your mac n cheese contains meat?" "Oh, yeah, it's made with chicken broth, why?" "MAYBE YOU COULD PUT THAT ON YOUR MENU NEXT TIME." (I paraphrase.))

Up to now, going back to meat hasn't seemed worth the bother. It's not actually that inconvenient to be a vegetarian; I eat eggs and cheese, I get enough protein (you don't actually need a ton anyway), and even the most meatful of restaurants is happy to make their pasta dish for you and leave the meat off (especially once you tell them you don't expect them to discount the price for you). Very occasionally someone gives me crap about it, but those times have been few and far between.

So why now? Well, a few reasons:

For the most part I haven't really missed meat, but every once in a while there's something I miss, or wish I could try. For example, Torrey recently made this AMAZING meatloaf that even to my vegetarian nose smelled like <i>absolute heaven.</i> Seriously I would almost have gone back to meat right on the spot if it weren't that beef is probably the worst place to start for this.

Also, I've been assuming all these years that I'd have to go through a really long period of GI distress, weeks even, before I reacclimated my body to digesting meat. I recently realized that I have no reason to assume it'd take that long. It could-- I have no idea-- but there's nothing to indicate either way. I'm not even sure why I leapt to that conclusion; for all I know it might just take a meal or two and be done.

And even though being vegetarian isn't *that* big an inconvenience, it would still make things *somewhat* easier, in terms of restaurants and visiting other people's houses.

And then there's something that I had never quite realized until I was explaining it to Seanan the other day. I'm not sure I even knew what I was going to say before the words came out of my mouth. The original decision to become a vegetarian... <i>I didn't make that decision for myself.</i>

I mean, I was an adult, I did <i>make</i> the decision. But I didn't do it for me. I didn't do it for my own reasons. I did it for my mother, and my aunt, to follow the things they taught me. I did it to be closer to what they wanted me to be. I did it to be <i>good.</i> Why should I continue a practice that was never really mine in the first place?

The more I think about it, the more I want to try going back. I'm still considering how to go about it. I'd probably want to start with something broth rather than solid, and probably chicken rather than beef (don't they always say red meat is harder to digest?) And maybe, like, on a Friday, so I'd have the weekend for staying up late if I have to. Maybe one meal with meat and then a few meals without, or every other meal. I was considering making a boxed instant rice thing we have in the pantry, although I don't know how much difference there is between the "chicken flavor" ingredients in those things vs. something made with broth that came from an actual chicken you cooked yourself.

There are some meat dishes that still gross me out at the thought of eating, so I wouldn't be going back to eating ALL meat. Then again, nobody eats EVERYTHING. Except maybe my husband.

Edit: I realized I left out something big!

I do eat some fish. A few years ago I started missing tuna fish sandwiches, so I cautiously started eating them again and had no problems whatsoever. I read somewhere it's a different protein, or something? Anyway it was never a problem.

Of course, I had always hated pretty much all seafood besides tuna fish before that, so that didn't change much. Shortly after I had my gallbladder out, Torrey happened to make salmon and I tried some and liked it. So sometimes I eat salmon, if it's cooked well. I still haven't liked any other seafood I've tasted, including sushi. So that's pretty much a dead end, there.

1. Steal the idea of Retroactive New Years Resolutions from Brooke.2. Steal some of her resolutions, too.3. Don't start smoking.4. Don't start any fist-fights.5. Don't steal ALL of Brooke's resolutions. That's just rude.6. Go to at least three other countries and have adventures!7. Go to Disneyland several times. 8. Acquire many Disney pins.9. Try some restaurants you've never been to before. Also eat at your favorite restaurant many times. (My parents are super helpful with this one. It's important to ask for help with your resolutions when you need it.)10. Do a lot of editing.11. Continue to work in a steady job for people I like.12. Have many wonderful people in my life whom I adore.13. Oh yes-- and feed a whole lot of crows. :D

I kept them all! I'm awesome! I am sure you're just as awesome, aren't you?

Wow. It's New Year's Eve. 2014 flew by, as the years seem to do for me. There's lots that I meant to write about and never did. I'm gonna use Google calendar to jog my memory...

In January we went to Disneyland for Seanan's birthday! I... don't remember a whole lot of that trip actually. Except PINS, of course. :D Also in January Seanan came to visit us and attended Conflikt! Yaaaaay!

In March we went to Emerald City Comic-Con! It was great and also terrible! They're getting really really big and kind of struggling to keep up with running and managing a media con that big. (It's a con in the trade-show format of San Diego Comic-Con rather than in the SF-con format of Norwescon.) Wes and Seanan both came to town for the con. A good time and many comics purchases were had by all.

In April there was Norwescon! And Seanan! Again! Because she was a GoH this time! Norwescon was its usual huge and awesome self.

Also in April was another Disneyland trip with Seanan, and a big Disney Pin Forum gathering! I met bunches of pin traders in person for the first time whom I'd only met online before, and made lots of great trades, and had a lovely time.

In May, Brooke visited our couch! And said hi to us while she was here!

In June I went to a Disneyana convention called Pacific Northwest Mouse Meet. It was... kinda disappointing, really. There were some good vendors and a teeeeensy bit of pin trading, but mostly you needed to be into the lectures by Imagineers and the trivia, which weren't quite my thing.

In July I played a surprisingly disappointing gig, a surprisingly happy-making gig, and an unsurprisingly happy-making one. I saw Outdoor Trek for the first time and I plan never to miss it again. Also I turned 43.

In August I went to WorldCon in London, which was interesting and hectic and I don't remember a lot. We did a good concert with Seanan. I got to spend time with many wonderful people I don't see nearly enough.

After the con, I spent about a week in Paris with the Crowells and Brooke and Seanan and Amy in an Air-B-n-B apartment (all hail the Brooke booking skills!) that was amazing and weird and wonderful. It had a hot tub and a sauna and a steam room and some bizarre and disturbing art on the walls which fortunately did not come alive and eat us. Also Seanan and Amy and I went to Disneyland Paris! Some of it was just like California and some was very different. Some of it was lovely and some not so much. It was fun to be able to use my French. Also Brooke took us to several really excellent restaurants. Our snarky French waiter was the BEST. On the whole, Paris was heavenly.

At the end of September/beginning of October, Tony and I went to FilkCONtinental as Guests of Honor! Tony made sure that Betsy & Sunnie were able to come too, because it just wouldn't be the same without them. It was AMAZING. The German filkers are some of the nicest filkers I’ve ever met anywhere. And the filk circles were all the kind of circle that makes you remember why you fell in love with filk in the first place. And when we played “We Are Who We Are,” the crowd STOOD UP and held hands in a big circle and sang along with all the choruses. We cried. There aren't words.

Somewhere in October I did a piece for the semi-revived Art Book Circle, a project where a group of artists are passing books between us and each adding a section. All my sections so far are in this Flickr album.

Oh, I keep forgetting stuff! Also in October, I went to the opera for the first time ever! It was Fishy's idea. We saw Don Giovanni. I really enjoyed it.

In late October, Seanan and I went to Disneyland for the Halloween Party. We skipped OVFF to do this, and I was partly sorry to miss it, but… I REALLY needed the Disneyland trip. There was a lot going on with me emotionally and mentally and... I literally burst into tears when we walked into the hotel room, it felt so much like coming home. Seanan’s right, it’s better than therapy.

We got to hang out with Sarah and wear our new Disney fascinators (gifts from Seanan) to the Halloween party and meet villains. Hades pretended to get all huffy at Seanan's Megara hat. And we got to hang out with Anthony and meet his older son who is a CHARMER OMG and take him to see Mickey's Magical Map (which still has three count 'em three princesses of color, YAY) because It's a Small World was closed. And we got to have dinner with Sarah and Amy (the other Amy) and David and Doc and I think Deborah and it was a warm night on the restaurant patio and "When Can I See You Again" from Wreck-It Ralph came on over the PA and we ALL SANG ALONG and it was GLORIOUS. (Actually just writing about this trip is putting me in a better mood than I've been in all month.)

Whenever we go to Disneyland, I like to try to have at least one "first" - usually an attraction I've never ridden before, or something. I got a few this time! David took us to Company D, which was cool! I'd never seen it before. And he bought me a present, a lovely Merida lanyard medallion that is HUGE and GORGEOUS.

And also Deborah & Michael took us to a banked-track roller derby meet at the L.A. Derby Dolls. (The teams we saw were the Sirens vs. the Fight Crew.) It was my first ever roller derby meet and OMG IT WAS SO MUCH FUN! Seanan kind of explained the rules to me and the announcers also gave a good explanation before the meet started, complete with videos on the big screens, so I had no trouble telling what was going on. We had a BLAST and I bought several shiny things from the vendors at half time and I really need to see more roller derby now!

In November Tony and I went to Orycon as filk Guests of Honor. They were so good to us! They barely worked us at all and gave us a gift bag full of chocolates and all kinds of good stuff. Primo guest gig! We had a good time in the filk circles too.

Also in November was Thanksgiving vs. Christmas, the holiday special by Molly Lewis, which took up a whole lot of our lives for most of October and November. We (Vixy & Tony & Sunnie & Betsy) were her house band, which means in addition to learning the song she wrote for me to sing (she wrote lyrics to the Doctor Who theme) we also learned about half the other songs in the show, to back up Molly and the other singers. So there were a LOT of rehearsals, which included last-minute learning of new songs, getting everyone's schedules to mesh, and then gathering the WHOLE FREAKING CREW to rehearse the script, which was still being edited right up to the minutes before the show.

The plot (spoilers ahead!) was that Molly’s favorite holiday is Thanksgiving, and she’s annoyed that Christmas takes everything over so early, and so she invites her friends over to her “house” (the stage) to talk about what they’re thankful for. But every conversation ends up turning to Christmas, and Molly finally gets fed up and sings about why Thanksgiving is Better than Christmas. Only it turns out it’s because Thanksgiving is her birthday, and everyone calls her on it and how she just wants presents, and then Santa Claus (played by Kevin Murphy) comes in and calls her a greedy-pants, but sings a song about how he also is annoyed that Christmas starts getting celebrated so early (“And why am I the closer in the Thanksgiving Parade??”) and everything looks awful until the narrator with the magic book saves the day.

It was LOADS of fun. A bit strange because there were only two shows; with all that rehearsal, it sort of poked the musical-theatre part of my brain—I’d forgotten what it was like to basically eat, sleep, and breathe a show for weeks on end—so then I couldn’t stop thinking about it after it was all over, not just having the songs in my head but also thinking about my lines and how to do a better read on them, because it kept feeling like there should be a run of four weeks of shows or something. It was grand. I hope she does another one. :) (Here's Molly's blog post about it. Here's Tony's. Here's where you can pre-order the live recording of it!)

This month we hosted a Solstice party, with a theme that Fishy had a great idea for: "We are the light". We encouraged people to come as lit up and glowing as they could manage, and turned off most of the lights in the house so that the light was primarily provided by the guests. We also replaced the kitchen light bulbs with blacklights, and Torrey got as much UV reactive food and drink as she could come up with. This turned out to be DELIGHTFUL! I loved seeing what everyone came up with-- battery-powered LED Christmas lights in various places, EL wire, glow in the dark clothing and necklaces, blinky-light jewelry. I put battery LED lights in my hair and around my waist and also I glittered up my tattoos. We bought some of those glow-stick necklace/bracelet things to give out to anyone who didn't have their own, and several other people brought other light-up or glowy things to share. We're totally doing this again!

We also deep-fried a turkey! Where by "we" I mean Fishy & Torrey. We borrowed his parents' deep-fry vessel, and used Fishy's engine hoist, decorated with Christmas lights, to do the actual raising and lowering (style, baby). I'm a vegetarian, but many people said it was the best turkey they'd ever had. And it must have been, because they fell on that thing like pirahnas on a cow. There was nothing but a skeletonized carcass within *minutes*.

For Christmas, Fishy and I drove to his parents' place in Spokane, and had a nice visit. I miss my little Shadow kitty, who lived with them for the last ten or so years before he died of cancer last year. It kinda wasn't the same being there without him.

I made several Disney pin boards for people this year, and one new shadowbox for myself. I'm really proud of my creations! Most of them are in this Flickr album (though not everything there is from 2014). I also experimented with doing a time-lapse of the creation process, though I haven't edited the photos into something viewable yet. I ran a few pin auctions this year and got good results, too.

I did some good things for my health this year. I switched anxiety meds to one that so far seems to be more effective and have fewer annoying side effects. I started using the Zombies, Run! app in an effort to motivate myself to take more walks. And I'm trying out using a treadmill desk at work; it's barely been two weeks of that, so I'm still undecided on whether it's for me. I bought a stand/sit desk rig to attach to my desk and am using Fishy's borrowed treadmill-- his office is being remodeled so right now he can't have his treadmill desk and needed somewhere to store it, and I have plenty of room and thought I'd take the opportunity to try it. My back seems happier, but my feet are like "WHAT ARE YOU DOING WE NORMALLY ONLY FEEL LIKE THIS AT DISNEYLAND."

Oh, and I almost forgot: Fishy and I bought a new car! Well, a used car. New to us. The old Subaru Outback finally croaked (partly due to a terrible mechanic who shall remain nameless) so we bought a 2003 Subaru Outback because we really liked it. It's an automatic and I really miss having a manual, but this is made up by the fact of KEYLESS ENTRY. Yeah I know this has been around for like 20 years or something, but I've never *owned* a car with it, and approaching my car and pushing a button to unlock it still makes me feel like a FREAKING WIZARD. Also approaching the car with a full shopping cart and not having to fuck around with the terrible back lock on the old Subaru is SO GREAT.

Also we bought a new car stereo for it, one with BLUETOOTH which we have also never owned. It politely offers to play our music when we get in (but does NOT autoplay!) When we both got in one time with bluetooth activated, it chose Fishy's phone for music, but switched to mine when I got a phone call. I ANSWERED MY PHONE BY PUSHING A BUTTON ON MY CAR STEREO, Y'ALL. We got the kind with a mic and it WORKED and it was AWESOME. I love living in the future! By which I mean the present!

I saw many delightful movies and read not nearly enough delightful books. I played probably far too much Monster Match and Frozen Free Fall and Maleficent Free Fall and Puzzle Pirates; I evolved monsters and completed levels and won power-ups and trophies. As one does. I finished a song. Just the one, but it seems to be a hit. I played in a lot of gigs, both ours and other people's, and almost always had fun doing it. I worked on our next album, although Tony has been working much much harder on it. I think it'll get finished in 2015. Most likely.

I did many things I'm not going to post about, and many other things that I'm not remembering right now. As one does.

Happy new year, everyone. May the happy memories of 2014 cheer you and the unhappy ones lose their sting, and may 2015 be better in every way.Originally posted at http://vixy.dreamwidth.org/792962.html.

Four years ago, my mother committed suicide. I still struggle coming to terms not only with her death, but with my family's wider history of suicide. My maternal grandfather and great-uncle died by suicide, my sister made an attempt, and I have struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts since puberty.

When I talk about these things, people shy away. It's a frightening subject, but if we want to help people who are suicidal, we need to understand what suicide really means, how it works, and how to respond to people contemplating it. Remember, talking about suicide does not cause someone to be suicidal. If you're worried about someone, it is safe to bring up the topic of suicide.

Suicide is not selfish. Imagine that your thoughts and emotions make up a house. My mother's mental house faded around the edges. Room by room, the space available to her shrank until she was left a hallway, trapped in a narrow place. It's not that she was thinking of herself; it's that she couldn't think of anyone, anything.

It’s nobody’s fault when this medical condition takes hold. As many as one in six people become seriously suicidal at some point in their lives. While it is not directly caused by depression, anxiety, drug use, or other risk factors, about 90% of suicidal people have mental issues that involve or worsen seriously suicidal thoughts. These issues can be treated.

Do try to say something, even if it's "wow, I'm sorry," or "well, crap." You don’t have to instantly become a perfect therapist. A friend of mine reached out to some of her friends, and they reacted with silence. "You could have heard a pin drop," she told me. "Nobody said a thing." It made her feel distanced, alone.

If the person you're talking to mentions a certain means of committing suicide, it's safe to bring up ways to remove or limit that means. "Do you want me to keep your gun for a while? Do you keep ammo in the house?" "When you say you're thinking about swallowing pills, are they pills you have? Can you get someone to dose out a week at a time instead of having the whole bottle around?" "You mentioned slitting your wrists. Is looking at knives or razors hard for you? I can come over and help you get those things out of the house for a while. Want to go shopping for an electric shaver together?" Bringing this up is not harmful and will not give anyone ideas. Don't press for action, just let them know there are options.

Later, check back in. Be ready for things not to suddenly be better. The mental issues surrounding suicidality don't go away quickly. If you can, try to communicate that it's okay to still be struggling.

If you're suicidal, there are people who can help. If you are not, the odds are that somebody in your life will be or has been before, and you can still help by being willing to educate yourself and others, and being willing to say the word "suicide."

Every time you share this post or other information on suicide, you help to fight the stigma, break the taboo, and dispel the myths. Feel free to link back to this. Feel free to comment here with other links and resources and stories. Feel free to talk to me about suicide. Feel free to comment anonymously on this post (trolling and hate speech will be deleted).

Last week, a woman knocked at my office door. (I keep it locked because I'm alone most of the time and we don't do walk-in business; not so much out of fear as that then I can just wave solicitors away without having to talk to them.)

She said, "I see you've been feeding the crows out here..."

Me [bracing self to field another complaint about bird poop on the sidewalk]: "Yes..."

Her: "You feed them dog food and hard boiled eggs."

Me: "Yes..."

Her: "You shouldn't do that. It's bad for them."

Me [o.O]: "Er... no it's not."

Her: "Yes it is! Something something Audubon Society [I didn't quite get all this] and you should really be feeding them bird food."

Me: "Oh no, I'm not their only source of food. Birds eat really often. I'm not even here all day, or every day. I see them out here eating roadkill when it's there, and..."

Her: "(something about the Audubon Society again) and you're LITERALLY KILLING THEM! LOOK at how SCRUFFY they are!"

Me: "They're molting. That's how they look when they molt."

Her: "They're supposed to be eating the grubs out here in the ground! They're not doing their JOBS!"

(In hindsight, this is the point at which I should perhaps have just started smiling and nodding.)

Me: "Er... no, I'm really not their only food source, I promise you."

Her: "You can TELL they're not eating the grubs because they're ALL OVER THE CARS!"

(There's been some speculation in my household as to what this meant. I thought she meant that the grubs were all over the cars, and I was trying to figure out how the grubs had climbed up onto the cars (and why); or if grubs fall out of the trees (I don't know anything about grubs) then how that would tell her anything, because they'd be falling on the cars anyway, whether the crows were eating them off the ground or not. Some of my household think maybe she meant the crows were all over the cars. Although none of us can figure out what that would have to do with the grubs, either.)

Me [at a loss]: "I can only say I'm certain I'm not their only food source. They eat lots of things, they're omnivores."

Her: "Well there are different SPECIES of crows and you're killing SOME OF THEM."

Me: "...I appreciate your concern, but I promise you it's fine. I can double check and read the ingredients of the dog food I'm using..."

Her [walking away with one of those bitter laughs like she's giving up talking to someone completely unreasonable]: "Read the AUDUBON SOCIETY!!!"

(I'm not entirely sure I got it all verbatim or in the right order because she kept skipping from one issue to another and I was having a hard time keeping up.)

Well. It shook me up a little. Partly because strangers unexpectedly getting on your case about something can be a bit unnerving. Partly because it's also a bit unnerving when someone says YOU ARE KILLING THIS THING THAT YOU CARE ABOUT. And partly because I don't think fast enough on my feet, and didn't have the presence of mind to point out to her that my sources on what I feed the crows include John Marzluff, the UW researcher who did the facial recognition studies in crows, Michael J. Westerfield, another crow researcher, and Seanan's uncle who did corvid rescue and rehab. (Some of you will remember the "MICROWAVE!" story.) The fact that I didn't tell the woman these things pokes at my "someone is WRONG on the INTERNET" button.

I went inside and continued my IM conversation with Seanan, telling her what happened. Seanan soothed my metaphorical feathers and reminded me that yes, I really am feeding them the right things. ("What did your uncle feed his ravens?" "Chicken, liver, sometimes hearts, egg yolks, and DOG FOOD.")

(And just to be thorough, we both searched the Audubon Society website, and neither of us could find anything to contradict this. Their food & feeding pages are devoted entirely to feeding seed-eaters; no mention of corvids there at all. I guess they don't think anyone would actually want corvids around. Their few corvid identification pages-- I checked all the species they had that are said to be in the Pacific Northwest-- mostly don't mention what crows eat at all, but the few that do include meat, fish, fruit, insects, and GARBAGE. Really, I think once garbage is on the diet list, dog food and eggs aren't going to be any trouble.)

It's not likely that lady will be back for me to tell her just how WRONG she is. She was around for an hour or two more after she talked to me. I think she was helping the neighboring office with some kind of gardening thing (I saw her moving a bag of potting soil at one point) but she's not the building's regular gardener, who is a very sweet lady that I talk to often. Every time I saw the woman again after that, she was walking along with a different one of my office neighbors and talking earnestly and frownily to them. I don't know if she was still complaining about the crows (I'll be amused if she was; I'm certain my neighbors don't give a shit what I feed them) or if she just had lots of other things to complain about that day. But people so rarely come back and give you the chance to say the things you wish you had thought to say in the moment.

* * * * *

Last week, a man knocked at my office door. Sometimes I wait before answering, to give people a chance to decide that a locked door means we're closed and wander away. (They do this blessedly often.) He didn't go away and he didn't look like he was selling anything, so I opened the door.

Now, it's not like this was a HUGE inconvenience for me or anything. But sometimes I just wonder what's going on in people's minds.

My office door says "EVERGREEN" on it, and has a green evergreen tree logo. About eye-level to this man for the thirty or so seconds that I made him wait before I came to the door.

The State Farm office, at the corner of the building, has:* A big brand new red and white awning that says "STATE FARM" and has the State Farm logo, and the agent's name and phone number and I think also their email address* A red and white feather banner on the corner (I had a time googling for what the hell those are called) that says "STATE FARM" and has the State Farm logo* A red and white sandwich-board style sign in front of the office on the planter that says "STATE FARM" and has the State Farm slogan and the agent's name and phone number* A large square sign mounted on two poles in the ground in front of the office that says "STATE FARM" and has the State Farm logo* Another sign mounted on the wall next to their door that says "STATE FARM" and has the State Farm logo (I think this one might be a drop box for payments; it's kind of raised)* Red and white lettering on the glass of their front windows and doors, which says STATE FARM" and has the State Farm logo (and their hours and phone number and stuff)

In other other news, I'm gonna copy and paste from Tony here, because reasons. Also because I'm still going WAIT HOLY CRAP HOW ARE THESE DATES HERE ALREADY AAAAAAAAA

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I just looked at the calendar, and was amazed at how quickly time keeps on slippin' into the future. The Wayward Sereniversary celebration is this very weekend! So soon? YES, SO SOON! It's this Saturday September 20th! Our beloved Sunnie will be joining us on fiddle, and it's going to be a blast! Come join us!

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Then the following weekend we jet off to FilkCONtinental with Betsy and Sunnie! What crazy person scheduled a Germany trip right after a Wayward gig? Oh right, it was me.

But wait! There's more! Before we stick a fork in 2014 and call it done, there's something special coming up after Orycon that we want you all to be a part of. We don't have all the i's crossed and the t's dotted yet, but you're going to want to save the evening of Wednesday, November 19th on your calendar for so

mething we're cooking up with someone we know. Trust me on this one... More details to come!

In other news: I have totally fallen for a TV show and I have to tell you all about it!

When I first saw the ads for Sleepy Hollow, I laughed out loud. That is going to be fucking ridiculous, I thought. That's an even worse concept than "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter" or whatever it was. Well, maybe I'll watch out of curiosity.

I missed the first two or three episodes when they were broadcast, but a friend online said he'd been watching it and that it was actually pretty good. So I got them on Amazon streaming.

And holy crap, they were GREAT.

I've seen the show referred to as camp, and I can't entirely dispute it. We're not talking camp like Rocky Horror or anything, but it's light SF/horror that is not taking itself too seriously, while at the same time not breaking the fourth wall to go "nudge nudge wink wink". It strikes just the right balance between the two. It's also not necessarily for purists of either Christian mythology or American history. The show plays fast and loose with both. But if that won't make you yell, you can sit back and be gloriously entertained.

The effects are wonderful, the writing is fantastic, and the casting... the casting is the main reason to stick with it. Tom Mison is absolutely perfect as Ichabod Crane; the way he speaks, the way he puts in the most delightful mix of knowledge, bewilderment and snark into his character, it's pure joy. Nichole Beharie is also perfect as Abbie Mills, the police officer paired with Crane to figure out the weird shit going on in the town of Sleepy Hollow. She's funny and snarky and dangerous and utterly believable while constantly barraged by unbelievable circumstances. Orlando Jones as her boss (Captain IRVING HEE HEE HEE) is absolute GOLD. Amandla Stenberg, of Hunger Games fame, is wonderful as his daughter Macey. John Cho is delightfully freaky as another police officer turned evil but struggling with himself. And John Noble gave me FREAKING CHILLS in his performance as a sometime assistant of Crane and Mills. There's also Lyndie Greenwood as Abbie's badass sister Jenny; Nicholas Gonzalez as Detective Morales, Abbie's ex and another officer in the force; Jill Marie Jones as Cynthia Irving, the Captain's ex-wife and Macey's mother; Katia Winter as Katrina Crane, Ichabod's wife.

And see, here's one of the big things that everyone's talking about with regard to this show. One of the two leads, and many of the supporting cast, are people of color. One of the two leads is a woman of color, in fact. And that's already all too rare in media nowadays. Let alone in science fiction media. And on top of that, which other reviewers have pointed out already... the people of color in the story aren't there just to suffer, sidekick, or teach the white folks a lesson. This was something I hadn't thought enough about until I read some other reviews on it, but even when there are leading or major supporting roles for people of color, they're all too often There for a Purpose (tm). They're the Magical Negro, or they have some morality lesson to teach, or they're there to be saved. It's depressingly rare that viewers of color get to just identify with characters in a story, having adventures and doing things and interacting with the other characters. And here, there is more representation than I've seen in any other genre show I can think of, and it is a fabulous cast telling fabulous stories.

The show doesn't put its hands over its eyes and go "la la la I don't see color" either. In the pilot episode, Crane, who's been revived from revolutionary war times, first meets Lt. Mills and says he assumes she's been emancipated from enslavement? Her reaction has about the level of WTF that the comment deserves. Race isn't ignored, but it's also not the focus. The focus is telling this delightfully weird interpretation of (and extensive elaboration on) the story of the Headless Horseman.

The show isn't without problematic aspects. There's been no queer or trans representation at all, so far. There's been one mention of the slur "g*psy" (though at least only in regards to a language being translated; thankfully there were no stereotypical characters brought in). And there was an episode involving a Native American "demon" and shamanic ritual that, while I'm completely unqualified to judge as to whether it was at all sensitively done or gross cultural appropriation, I can't say is likely to be flawless given the liberties the show takes with Christian mythology and history.

While acknowledging its problematic aspects, I'm still really pleased with its overall level of representation, and just plain super enjoying the stories. It sort of pokes a similar spot that Buffy used to, with similar snappy dialogue and unexpected humor in the face of supernatural shit, but without Joss Whedon's weirdness about women. If you miss Buffy's good parts, or if you just love a good science fiction/supernatural story, I really really recommend Sleepy Hollow. One catch: it's not really easy to jump into the middle of. Season 2 premieres on the 22nd, but you can get all of season 1 from Amazon streaming and probably other places, and it's TOTALLY worth it. (The season 1 finale made me go AUGH I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT YOU GUYS.)

(Bonus: Audible released a free download of Tom Mison reading Washington Irving's original "Legend of Sleepy Hollow" aloud. I just listened to it this morning. I didn't get a lot of work done. Damn, that man's voice.)

ETA: I *think* this is the review I refer to above. Not 100% sure because I don't remember reading that super cramped format, so maybe I was reading it quoted elsewhere in large parts.

This is also a good one, and makes some points that I missed, including points about gender-- the female leads display no jealousy, cattiness, etc. regarding each other's interaction with the male lead, and the show doesn't go the obnoxious "a male and female lead MUST have sexual tension" route. Katrina and Mills both stay focused on the apocalypse at hand rather than "who gets the man". Crane and Mills become close and caring friends. It's refreshing.

Since I have less impetus for walks now that my company no longer has a PO Box at the local post office (it used to be my job to go check it every day), I'm trying to make a point of taking walks. I'm woefully out of shape, in the stamina sense-- I get out of breath waaaaaaayyyyyyyy too easily. On Brooke's recommendation, I finally got around to downloading "Zombies, Run!" and giving it a try.

After a couple of problems which turned out to be mainly user error, I've got the thing working, including playing nice with Google Play Music (it says this is an experimental feature and may not work, so I was all happy when it worked for me!) My playlist for the purpose is called "All You Zombies".

I'm enjoying the app so far. I've only done a couple of stories, but the very first story mission knocked my socks off. Like, I was not expecting right away for them to go for the tragic, and the voice acting is exceptionally well done, so it wasn't cheesy like it might have been with bad acting. When we got to (rot13 for spoilers) gur mbzovr punfvat zr jub jnf npghnyyl gur qrnq-naq-mbzovsvrq ybir vagrerfg bs zl pbagnpg ng gur onfr, jvgu fnvq pbagnpg tbvat "bu... bu tbq gurl'er fubbgvat" juvyr gur bgure crefba ng gur onfr jnf yvxr "lbh xabj fur jbhyq unir jnagrq guvf, lbh xabj fur jbhyqa'g unir jnagrq hf gb yrnir ure nf n mbzo" and I was like HOLY CRAP THEY ARE NOT FUCKING AROUND HERE. The story is not fluffy, is what I'm saying. Torrey told me that Elizabeth Bear wrote a chapter for them, and some other authors like her as well. I'm looking forward to the rest.

So far I've been walking along our stretch of the Interurban Trail. This amuses me somewhat, as our stretch of the Interurban borders directly on a verrrrrrry big cemetery. My 30-minute-ish walk is pretty much the length of the cemetery and back home again. So far no actual zombies spotted. (It's got a quite nice old rusty wrought-iron fence, though. Atmospheric!)

I doubt if I'll ever segue to running. Ever since my knee started clicking whenever I go up stairs (putting an end to my career as a stealth assassin), I'm a little leery of anything that high-impact. I dunno, we'll see if I ever get bored with walking. Small steps. So to speak.

Not about the con itself, which should be fine. I have no programming obligations except for Seanan’s concert and the related rehearsal(s), so I’m free to enjoy myself/be Seanan’s PA/sleep in a lot.

I just tend to get a certain brand of anxiety before travel of any kind, and the longer/farther the trip, the worse it is. It’s sort of a combination of “what if I fuck up and forget something” and “what if I don’t know where I’m going/can’t get places/get lost” and a vague, nebulous sort of anxiety that has no grounding in reality. (Oddly it never includes “what if my plane crashes”. I hate airports, but I don’t mind flying. Actually I mostly hate the other people you have to deal with in airports. Maybe I just hate people.)

My biggest worry that is actually grounded in reality is that I’m not sure I’ve saved up enough money. My friends wouldn’t let me actually starve, but I’m already mooching off people to some degree, and I… selfishly want to have enough to buy Disney pins DON’T JUDGE ME. And I really can’t ask people to loan me money for food so that I can keep money in reserve to give to Disney.

Oh yeah, that’s the best part. For a few days in between WorldCon in London and EuroCon in Dublin (which I’m not going to, but which is the weekend after LonCon and where Seanan is guesting), Seanan & I will be nipping over to Paris to go to DISNEYLAND PARIS WOOT! Not that I don’t adore you and all, WorldCon friends, but DISNEYLAND. We’ve never been, and I speak enough French to get us by (last year the employees at the Disney store there thought I was Belgian; make of that what you will) and YAY. We shall not be at the Hugos, because plans were made and tickets bought before Seanan’s nomination email came through, and let me tell you how glad I am not to have to pack a ball gown. SORRY GUYS MORE ROOM FOR DISNEY PINS.

I’m trying to help my anxiety by making lists. The problem with lists is that if I’m not careful and start going into brainstorming mode, I will list things that aren’t actually necessary, make a list so long that I overwhelm myself, and then look at the magnitude of Things To Do and then just shut down completely and go take a nap. Lists aren’t quite the all-purpose tool for me that they are for some people.

My brain has decided that this is the perfect time to remind me of all the stupid/embarrassing things I have ever done. Bad weasels. Sit. Heel.

But, one way or another, soon I’ll be enjoying tea and pastries and SF and DISNEYLAND DID I MENTION and so I’m trying to keep calm and get my shit together. :)

The Star Trek (TOS) episode they're doing is "Mirror, Mirror." I actually have never seen one of their productions, so this is going to be exciting for me! Tony saw them last year and absolutely loved them.

We'll be one crew member short of the usual band, as Betsy will be away with the faeries. :) But we hope to see some of you humanoids there!
Originally posted at http://vixy.dreamwidth.org/791355.html.

It's summer, and it has been ridiculously hot. It was less melty this weekend, at least. My brain's still pretty melty today.

'Tis the season for what I call the teenager stage of the juvenile crows. (I've probably written about this before, but it doesn't stop being funny to me.) They're old enough that the adults no longer dive-bomb people protectively for getting near them, but young enough that they still have the voices that sound like kazoos. And still try to get adults to feed them. This results in the crows coming to my food dish (and everywhere else) consisting of one or two juveniles following an adult around going KWAAAAH! KWAAAAH! KWAAAAAAAH! with beaks constantly open, while the adults gather food for themselves and try their best to ignore the juveniles.

Once in a while the adults get fed up (so to speak) with it enough that they'll suddenly turn and shove some food into the juvenile's mouth. Which results in a sound like KWAHH! KWMMPHWMMMWMMMPH. Which is NEVER NOT HILARIOUS.

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My bosses have decided to cancel their PO Box and have the mail just come to the physical address. I've worked for this company for ten years, and they had the box for I don't know how many years before that. Back when they got it, the idea was to protect the office manager (now me); one or two incidents of an angry claimant threatening or shooting at insurance adjusters made national news, so I'm told, and since everyone else in the company works at home, the office manager is alone in the office most of the time. They got the PO Box so that the company's address on public materials, correspondence and so forth, would not be the physical address where a claimant could find the office manager alone.

Google making it possible to pretty much find the physical location of anyone anywhere, the bosses have decided there's no point making me go to the post office every day. They did check with me first to see if I was okay with the change. I was. So last week I canceled the PO Box. It was much easier and quicker than I was expecting (though probably they skipped a step or two for me, like checking ID, since they know me by sight.) And now I no longer have to make those daily 1.5-mile-round-trip trips. And though that means taking my walks on my own time now, it's a bit of a relief not to have that hanging over me every morning (the mornings with migraines were...unpleasant.) It's kind of a weird change; I haven't yet stopped getting the feeling around 9:30 or 10am of "I've gotta do something I'm supposed to do something I haven't done yet and I'm about to be late for it."

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We had two gigs this past weekend. We had fun but I'm exhausted today. (See also: mornings with migraines.) Can't Stop the Serenity was in a cute new location this year, the Central Cinema. Nice acoustics, nice layout, good feel, pretty good food. (Although some folks seemed to think "dinner theatre" equated with "bar" and thus talked throughout the concert. A little distracting, but not the venue's or the organizers' fault. I chose to think of it as having communed a bit with the spirit of my mother, who played her share of bar gigs where nobody was listening.) It was a good turnout for the event. "Hecklevision" (basically MST3K via tweet) seemed to work well once everyone got the dick jokes out of their systems. I'd enjoy seeing a movie a little better suited to it. We had to duck out early so as to get rested up for Sunday, so we didn't get a chance to say goodbye to the SBC folks. Thanks again for inviting us!

Betsypalooza (not the official name I don't think) aka House Concert Under the Trees (I don't actually know what its official name was) was an absolute BALL from start to finish. I was so happy to see all the wonderful people who came and brought all their positive energy and love. I really needed that. (I know that I hide a lot from the social, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate what you bring.) The tiredness today is TOTALLY worth it. Thank you to everyone who performed and everyone who worked and everyone who came and everyone else who tweeted or otherwise sent their good wishes. Thanks especially to Kaede Tinney for asking us to join the event as their backup band. <3 <3 <3

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Tomorrow's my birthday. I'll be 43. My postal carrier at work (who's been our regular carrier for the entire ten years I've been here, and for the years before that when he knew the previous office manager) remembered my birthday, but didn't remember my age, and refused to believe it. :) That's always flattering. I get the good genes from both sides. I told him I'd show him my ID tomorrow if he wanted. I might greet him at the door with my driver's license just to be funny.

I've been wracking my brains for literally a month trying to figure out what I want to do for my birthday. And I can't really think of anything. I don't have any super-special restaurant I want to go to. I'm thinking about afternoon tea at Queen Mary's, but that's not something the whole household would really enjoy. (Torrey and I might just go by ourselves.) The spa would be nice, but the boys can't go to that. (Torrey and I might go do that too.) I perused the local theatre and ballet offerings, but nothing's on right now that I want to see.

Maybe I'll call in sick to work tomorrow. I'm not sure they'd actually buy it... but that's actually all I can think of right now that I really want to do. Take an extra day off work and just lie around the house. Except then I'd just end up feeling guilty at the end of the day for having "wasted" it. Brains are silly.

What's he up to next? Why, it's a GIANT SPINNING 3D MAZE FOR BOWLING BALLS! Because of course it is.

Yes, really.

Building the maze is going to require the purchase of a LOT of steel. Over a ton, in fact! And to my mother-in-law's eternal perplexity, I'm actually in favor of this plan!

(Don't worry, he's got steel-toed boots.)

To help pay for the steel, he's got a Kickstarter going right here. Please consider donating, or at least spreading the word! Help there be one more piece of awesome kinetic sculpture in the world, and make Tony park in the driveway for a couple of months! Everyone wins! Or something!

12. You wrote the article and pointed out the straight white men live life on the lowest difficulty setting. Okay, fine. What do I/we do next?

Well, that’s up to you, isn’t it? What I’m doing is pointing out a thing. What you do with that thing is your decision.

That said, here’s what I do: recognize it, and work to make it so the more difficult settings in life becomes closer to the one I get to run through life on — by making those less difficult, mind you, not making mine more so.

I’ve spent time on and off ever since then thinking about more specific answers to this question.

I’m thinking about it again in the wake of the UCSB shootings. I watched Elliot Rodger’s final video about the “Day of Retribution”, and I read his entire 140-page manifesto. (I’m not linking them, and if you choose to watch and read them, be aware that the content includes hate speech, misogyny, and graphic descriptions of torture.)

His motivation for killing both women and men was misogyny. He explicitly states that he wants to kill women for not giving him sex, and men for getting to have sex with women when he “deserved it more.” He states this over and over. Yet there are still people trying to claim he’s “just one crazy guy.” It’s “just one isolated incident”. Or that he just hated all humanity.

(There was definitely racism and classism in his motivations as well. But the overwhelming, driving force here was misogyny-- his hatred of women.)

The #YesAllWomen hashtag on Twitter was created in response. The misogynistic violence of Elliot Rodger was not an isolated incident. Another such incident happened in Stockton literally within hours of the UCSB incident. Another happened just a month ago. Do some google searching. Male violence motivated by hatred of women is a regular occurrence.

Not all men menace women. But all women have been menaced by men. It really is that simple.

“So what am I supposed to do about it?”

I’ve seen this question phrased in various ways, from the sarcastic “yeah? so what?” to the genuine “I don’t know how to help.”

Here are my thoughts. I think they apply not only to sexism and misogyny, but to racism, transphobia, homophobia, and ableism. So even if I don’t say so every time, please understand that I’m referring to all oppressed groups here.

1. LISTEN. Listen to people when they’re talking about their own lived experiences. You might feel like you’re being told “just shut up.” What you’re really being told, asked, begged to do is “shut up and listen.”

This means not dismissing a woman’s concerns about her safety as silly or overreacting. It means not dismissing someone’s objection to a racist remark as “too sensitive” or “but it was just that one racist guy.” It means not dismissing, period. Our tendency-- all of us-- is to assume that if we don’t see it, it doesn’t really happen, or it’s really rare. (Just today I had a man on Twitter telling me that because he’s never heard anyone joke about rape, it must not be that common.)

The first time I read women of color talking about white women always wanting to touch their hair, like they’re some exotic pet or something, I was shocked. I was like who the hell even does that. I’d absolutely never heard of it before. And yet, it happens to women of color all the goddamn time. I didn’t go “oh, it was probably just that one weirdo,” even though I’d never heard of it before. Because they know their own experiences better than I do.

Listening also means thinking about what you’re hearing. Think about how many women are saying these things happen to them. Think about what it would be like to have them happen to you daily. Most importantly, think about your own behavior. Which leads me to...

2. Don’t get defensive. So many men interrupt women’s conversations about their own experiences with “but NOT ALL MEN…!” So many white people interrupt POC conversations about their own experiences with “but NOT ALL WHITE PEOPLE…!”

Look, if you have genuinely NEVER done the harmful thing they’re talking about, then you don’t need to get defensive, because it’s not about you. And if you ever have done the thing they’re talking about, then you should stop talking and think about how to make sure you stop doing that thing.

To go back to my example above, I’ve never asked a black woman if I could touch her hair. It’s a gross, rude, othering thing to do. I also did not go “hey hey *I* never did that!” in the mentions of the WOC that were talking about it on Twitter. What would be my point? Why should they care? They still have to deal with white women who do. My “LOOK AT ME I’M A DECENT HUMAN BEING” doesn’t help them. It doesn’t make them feel better. It doesn’t change their experience in any way, except that now I’m making their conversation about me. (And I’m also implicitly asking for praise just for being a decent human being.)

It’s uncomfortable to hear about a harmful behavior and ask yourself, “wait, do I do this? Have I ever done this?” Defensiveness is a common knee-jerk reaction to avoid feeling that discomfort. But that discomfort is important. Stop a minute and let it do its job.

If you are one of the not all men or not all white people or not all cis people or what have you, that is absolutely awesome. I’m not being sarcastic here. If you would never dream of doing the harmful things you see being discussed, I’m really glad. Unfortunately, when people are talking about their experience of the harmful thing, it is not the time to say so.

3. WITHHOLD YOUR APPROVAL OF HARMFUL BEHAVIORS. So the first two things didn’t feel very active, did they? Here’s some ACTION you can take!

Men: if you’re in a group of other men, and one of them makes a sexist remark-- rape joke, sexist joke, catcalling women on the street, the kind of thing that as a good guy you’d never do-- don’t give your approval. This means don’t laugh, don’t smile, and also don’t be silent. Say something. “Hey man, that’s not cool.” “That’s not funny.” Something to explicitly show that it’s not okay.

Sexism, racism and the rest aren’t about hurt feelings. They are about big pictures. Overarching cultural and social systems that are in place to benefit certain groups at the expense of others. There’s a ton of evidence out there. Wage differences for the same jobs for women vs. men, for white people vs. POC, for cis people vs. trans people. Incarceration rates for drug crimes (mostly black) vs. actual rates of drug use (mostly white). Start googling and keep going until you can’t handle it anymore.

But it isn’t like there’s one old white guy out there controlling it all, one board of directors we can fire and be done with it. Huge systems aren’t controlled like that. Huge systems are made up of people. Individuals. How many are we on this planet by now? Seven billion I think?

I don’t know about you, but the best answer I’ve got is that to change the system you have to change the minds of the people it’s comprised of. Sometimes that means one mind at a time. Not all of them, alas, but enough of them to tip the balance, enough of them to have a majority of people saying this is wrong, this is not the way it should be. Enough to take control of the system and change it.

And things like jokes and casual catcalling normalize the attitudes that keep the system in place. They normalize the status quo. They say it’s okay to keep thinking of the group being joked about as other-- or to just keep on not thinking of the group at all. Erasure helps keep the system in place too.

Worse, they tell the people who are racist, or sexist, or violent, that it’s okay. One example: actual surveys have shown that men who admit to forcing women to have sex when they didn’t want to (a surprising number of men will admit to this as long as the word “rape” isn’t used) believe that it’s a normal thing that all men do. They don’t know you’re laughing because it’s “just a joke.” They genuinely believe you’re laughing because you do it too.

Fan pages for Elliot Rodger existed within hours of the news breaking. Go and look at the number of commenters who cheer him on for what he did, if you can stomach it. It’s not just a joke.

Don’t join in. And don’t give your silent approval. Speak up.

4. Use your privilege for good.

Look, women have been speaking out about these things for decades, and the men who need to hear it aren’t listening. Sad but true: men are more likely to listen to other men. White people, cis people, straight people, able-bodied people, the same applies. You have pull here. Talk about these things.

Some people have a certain amount of privilege. I have some, as a white woman. Nobody’s asking me to apologize for being white or for having white privilege. But one of the things I can do with that privilege is this: I can engage with other white people about issues of racism. POC have to deal with racism every goddamn day and I can’t even imagine how exhausting that is. While it’s appalling that a white person might listen more to me than to a woman of color, I can still lend my voice. I can’t speak for POC, nor should I ever try to. But I can say “that’s not okay” when someone makes a racist comment. I can call out cultural appropriation when I see it. I can say “you should listen to this POC/you should read what they have written.”

I can also remind people that saying or doing a racist thing doesn’t make YOU a racist; it makes you a person who made a mistake that needs fixing. Hey, I’ve made mistakes too! From racist assumptions about athletes, to wearing bindi, to being ignorant of words like “g*psy” and “tr*nny”. I wasn’t always good at listening, either. It took me a while. And it took some people in my life who were willing to talk about it and keep talking.

There are lots of other ways to put your privilege to good use. Voting for measures that move us toward equality. Voting for politicians whose policies don’t disproportionately disadvantage oppressed groups. Teaching your children, if you have children or are a teacher, clergyman, or other authority figure-- all children, not just the girls-- about consent, bodily autonomy, and fairness. Teaching open-mindedness and compassion and empathy. (Empathy can be and needs to be taught.) Speaking out to your administrator or PTA against sexist dress codes in your school. Writing to your Congresspeople about reproductive rights, racist sentencing laws, poor ADA compliance. Going to movies and reading books and comics that feature women, POC, queer, disabled, and/or trans people as major characters; using your dollars to let media creators know that diversity can and will sell. You take it from here. Use your imagination.

I confess that my first introduction to Spider-Man was via The Electric Company, but I still feel I’m geek enough that yeah, I’m gonna go there: remember “with great power comes great responsibility?”

Oh yeah, we'll be playing at Wayward this Saturday! I don't know exactly what we're playing yet, but I'll be sure to include the new one that debuted at Norwescon, for those who didn't get to hear it there. :)

I keep meaning to post various things, and then the most I tend to get around to is updating my running book post. Then another month slips by. Oops!

Speaking of that, I'm trying to read more books by women authors. I'm also getting more into comics a bit lately. (Because of storage issues, I only read trades.) Recommendations are welcome. I find I have a sudden interest in Wonder Woman again (Lynda Carter is my Wonder Woman) so I just finished the New 52 Wonder Woman on advice from a friend, and am going to ask my comic shop about getting Gail Simone's run next.

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The crows are nesting (and the baby on the Wellesley college ravencam is getting bigger!) When I walk to or from work (which is a bit less often now that I mostly carpool with Tony) they still follow me for food, but now for much shorter distances before stopping, which I think means they're not willing to stray too far from their nests. I'll get one crow for about a block, then that one will go away, and a different one will show up. (In autumn it's just MOBS of crows (or rather, murders) for blocks and blocks until they get to a bigger delineation of their territory.)

They're hilariously picky lately. They like dry puppy food better than dry dog food (I think because of the smaller chunks, they can hoard more) and even certain of the bits in the mix better than others. Sometimes I'll go out and look in the dish, and there dry food chunks of all one color left in there, the crows having picked out the ones they like best. They'll eat the rest eventually, if I don't give them more. Sometimes I'm a sucker, though. Especially if I've already got a treat ready for them. Today the smaller one that I currently see most often (I think it's one of a pair that usually comes, and I'm not sure if it's a mate or a year-old sibling helper (they do that)) perched on the planter and did the peek-in-are-you-there thing and even made a gentle little inquisitive caw. I'm just such a sucker for cuteness. Plus one of my co-workers brought in a bunch of eggs from his chickens to give away, having more than he and his wife can eat, so I hard boiled them all (you can do this in a microwave, it turns out) and have been handing them out as crow treats. Protein and fat are good for babbies!

The seagulls haven't been around at home lately, and I'm not sure if that means they're off somewhere nesting too, or the crows there have driven them away for good. I never really could bring myself to chase them off. Partly because they look so hilarious (and kind of cute, in a HUGE cartoon sort of way) and partly because, well... everything just wants to live, after all.

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Seanan and I went to Disneyland! A couple weeks ago! Which should really surprise no one. I should get my photos loaded up to Flickr, although having my Google phone (did I mention I love my Google phone? I love it so much that I actually sometimes literally HUG IT) automatically back photos up to Google+ (do you write it like that or do you write Google Plus?) makes me almost want to just start using that for photos instead, because I am LAZY.

Anyway, it was an interesting trip this time around. I went to a BIG pin gathering of folks from the pin trading forum I frequent. So fun to meet all these people for the first time in person! And some I had met before, including one of my Seattle pin-friends. Many trades were had! Also, Big Thunder Mountain was finally reopened after refurbishment! It was... well, now I've had that experience. :) I took Mousie on Radiator Springs Racers, to get him in the photo, but the photo didn't come out that great. Oh and I finally got to ride Tower of Terror, which Seanan will not ride with me at Disneyland (only at Walt Disney World) but Amy was there to go with me YAY! It has a special place in my heart, more so after I found out that its birthday is also my birthday. It's a Small World was closed, alas. But we got to make faces with pixies in Pixie Hollow, as is our wont, and got to meet Fawn played by an actual Latina friend this time! And also got to meet CAPTAIN AMERICA! I had him record a video greeting for Torrey, our own alternate-universe Captain America aka Stephanie Ginger Rogers. :D (Deb and Seanan were patient and kind enough to go through the line with me twice to get that right.)

It was also the last weekend of Spring Break, which we didn't realize, which meant bigger than usual crowds on Saturday and Sunday morning, and then sudden EMPTY DESERTED PARK on Sunday after 8 or 9pm, I guess because everyone went home to get to bed early. So the up side was we made good life choices in sleeping in on Sunday morning, and then we got to ride a bunch of things we'd never been on before just because they're usually too crowded and Fantasyland is really too cramped.

This led to one of the most interesting experiences when someone ahead of us on Pinocchio's Daring Journey had clearly lit up the WORLD'S BIGGEST JOINT. It was, ironically, just after the Pleasure Island scene. It smelled so strong that at first we thought someone must have hopped off the ride car and been sitting in the ride smoking RIGHT NEXT TO US, but nobody was there, and then it smelled that strong for three or four scenes (which are closed off by separate doors you're driven through) before finally beginning to dissipate. It was enough to make us all a bit dizzy. And kind of uncool to do on a ride for kids. Although at least it was after 9pm. We opened our mouths to tell the ride operator when we came out, but she said "I know, I smelled it when they got off. I've called security and we're ventilating the ride. I'm really sorry." She was brusque but mostly cool (we'd been chatting with her before we got on) and let us sit for a moment while Seanan's head cleared so that she wasn't operating a scooter under the influence.

Disneyland: it's a magical place.

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Norwescon was cool. Music things are always a bit conflicting for me these days. I think maybe that'll get a separate post of its own. But anyway it went well. Major kudos to Dara for organizing the Norwescon Music track and to all the sound crew for working their usual magic!

There are some gigs and cons in our future as well... I refer you to the Vixy and Tony website for details. :)

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My mental health's been... well, I'm kind of easily distracted, and easily lose a lot of time to games, and sometimes that's because I need to. My amount of available socialness seems to be a lot less lately than it used to be. So y'know, it doesn't mean I hate anybody. Just that I've only got what I've got. Online is always easier.

Mother's Day is coming up, of course, as is my dad's 75th birthday. This is the time of year when I reply to radio/TV ads with "yeah well, I've got a present that YER mom will love." It's an effective defense mechanism, I find.

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I never did get around to posting travelogues of Fishy and my trip to Europe last summer. I still mean to do that! Even if the trip will be a year old by the time I do it. Y'all don't mind horribly out of date posts, right? :DOriginally posted at http://vixy.dreamwidth.org/790244.html.

I finished a song! It took me about a year. I was waiting to post it until after we debuted it at Norwescon. I think it went over pretty well. :)

Background: this was commissioned by Tony, who wanted a geek anthem. I got partway through writing it and found myself blocked. Thinking of all the things still wrong, and things that were going on at the time both in and out of fandom-- harrassment, backlash over representation, lack of protections still for so many-- I just didn't see how I could write a song about how much it got better.

I confessed this tearfully to Tony, who said, essentially, "write it the way you see it."

Parts of this were inspired by Seanan McGuire, and parts of this were inspired by Dean Trippe. This might have been titled "We Are Who We Are and Screw Anyone Who Doesn't Like It," or possibly "My Geek Pride Will Be Intersectional or It Will Be Bullshit". But for purposes of fitting on a CD case, I went with "We Are Who We Are." (The bits in parentheses are counterpoint.)

Our concert will be Friday (tomorrow ACK) at 8:30pm, followed by a short break, followed by the concert of the fabulous Seanan McGuire!

I'm debuting a brand new song! It's about geek pride and inclusivity and aaaaa it's my new baby and I am nervous. :) I'll post the lyrics here sometime after the concert, but I think it'll be best heard sung, so I hope you can be there.

On Saturday at 10pm, we'll be playing backup band for Molly Lewis. She's got some new stuff too, and it's super fun!

I'm also excited because I get to drum my little fingers off for both Seanan & Molly this year (and maybe a little for myself too) and I've been having a BLAST doing it!

Back to work now for a few more hours, then off home to pack. Hope to see you there!

I've long been a fan of Espionage Cosmetics. They're a local company who make gorgeous, fannish-themed makeup powders and do business mainly at cons. They recently came out with a new product, and I'm super happy to have backed the Kickstarter! These will be available for retail sale eventually, but I think not just yet, and I am totally enamoured with them!

I speak of the Nailed It! nail wraps! (What's a nail wrap? Stickers for your fingernails, basically. Not fake nails, just color to go on your real ones.) Gorgeous nail wraps in fannish themes, from the more obviously themed (I can't wait to wear my MST3K and Jayne Hat ones) to the slightly more abstract ones (the Hulk ones are just green and purple glitter gradients, for instance). I'm currently wearing a mix of the Planets and Glitter Nebulae sets.

Besides the gorgeous themes, what's awesome is how easy they are to put on. It took me a few tries to get the hang of it, but once you do, it's super fast. They have a video to help you out, too. At first I thought I'd need to cut them down (I have very small hands) but I found ones that fit me well, and they provide enough to have a range of sizes, and the ones that are too big for you, you can cut down to size as replacements if need be.

That's another awesome thing about them. I'm super hard on my nails. I'm a secretary for a living, I type a lot at other times, and I'm not necessarily careful when doing things like washing dishes. The extras are good for sizing and also for replacement. They generally last longer for me than for other people I've talked to; they last maybe a week for me (unless I do something like, say, smashing my thumb with a hammer, just to pick an example completely at random) but that's already longer than any nail polish I've EVER used, including professional manicures. (Edit: I should clarify; they don't all ten fail after a week; about a week is when I start to see chipping on two or three of them.) And when I need to replace a chipped or lost one, it's much, much easier and quicker than nail polish would be. Stick one on, coat of clear quick-drying topcoat (that part's optoinal) and *done*.

I gave up wearing nail polish a long time ago mostly because it was too much hassle for color that lasts maybe a day or two, and nails that break. These have reinforced my nails (I broke a nail the other day, but I'd already gone waaaaay longer with long nails than I have since I used to wear acrylic tips) and they look gorgeous. Every time I'm sitting at the computer and catch sight of my sparkly nails it makes me ridiculously happy! (No, not all the sets are glittery, in case I give that impression.) Since we got these, I've been wearing them constantly, and I seriously think I will never wear regular nail polish again.

Edit: I realized this morning I should have linked to their Kickstarter, which is over now, but which still shows pictures of all the sets. :)

So Fishy and I have a date night every so often, and recently we got the idea (I forget which of us this occurred to first) that since there are so many places around town we keep seeing and meaning to try, we'd make our date night be dinner at a restaurant we've never been to before. So I thought I'd start posting about them, because the internet is all about telling people what you had for dinner!

Not exactly as bizarro as it seems to want to be (certainly no backwards-talking superheros arrived while we were there) but full of interesting decor nonetheless. You've heard of a stuff-on-the-wall place? This is more like a stuff-on-the-ceiling place. :)

A bit small and cramped, but comfortable, and the food was good. I had the pumpkin ravioli and it was delicious. Also the wine recommended by the waitress was really good! I wish I could remember what variety it was. (I'm a fan of red wines). I'm easy to please in an Italian place, but I'd definitely recommend this one.

The place is beautiful and the service was good, but the food was kinda meh. I was thrilled when I found out they had Mac n Cheese Monday! Add your own toppings! But it turned out a little disappointing; I ordered broccoli in mine, and nearly every piece of it was burnt. Also the cider I ordered wasn't great (came in a can, because... that's a hipster thing I guess? So Fishy tells me. No more ciders in a can for me. Probably no more Golden Beetle either. I might give them another chance sometime (anyone can have an off night) but we've got lots of other places to try first...

There are two of these, one downtown and one in Greenwood. The Greenwood one is really close to us and kind of hidden away; I really didn't expect it to be so big inside! The decor is great, especially for us-- industrial in a way that appeals to Fishy, but with warm colors and lighting to make it comfortable enough to appeal to me too. (No mean feat.) :)

The pizza was great! I tried an unusual pizza because why not-- grapes and gorgonzola with a balsamic reduction of some kind. It was delicious. I forget what Fishy had. They were smallish pizzas but big enough that we both had leftovers. Also the waitress brought GIANT cans of olives to use as pizza stands for us to allow more room on the table. Hee! And the service was good and friendly. All in all I'd go there again for sure. When it gets nicer we can even walk there.

This wasn't a Fishy date night, it was a Torrey date night! It's a new place on Greenwood; she'd already checked it out (being a teacher) but it was my first time. Great place for happy-hour-and-five-eighths (I'm not kidding) on Friday night. So it's a teacher-themed bar & restaurant, with the decor and menu just enough themed to be cute but not pushed far enough over the top to be creepy. A bit on the small side, but still comfortable, and the service is great.

The menu is adorable, with teacher-themed drinks and foods and sometimes math-problem prices. I had the "crack n cheese" (yeah I'm predictable) and it was delicious, as was the "Spoon!" aka a spoonful of chocolate chip cookie dough for dessert. Torrey was absolutely thrilled with her "student driver", an orange and chocolate cocktail that was a bit too bitter for my taste, and her "lunchables" appetizer (not actual Lunchables) and tacos. We would happily go back there any time. Also it gets bonus points for being only a few minutes' walk from our local comic book store.

Something definitely lodged itself in my chest during Conflikt, and has spread into my sinuses, in a weird reversal of the way colds usually happen to me. I made it through the work week mostly by doing as little as possible, including the Friday all-staff luncheon meeting. Lucky there; the co-worker who was my ride is also sick, and wanted to leave early, and so, eh, what can I do, my ride's leaving, BYE.

Anyway, it's meant a lot of napping and a lot of hiding under blankets and not a lot of communicating with anyone. Sorry to those I owe a response to. Everyone's been sick; buy stock in Kleenex, folks.

This weekend is a medley of do nothing and nap, with the exception of getting Seanan safely to the airport, by way of Espionage Cosmetics, through a maze of twisty passages, all in Tacoma, to pick up Kickstarter bonuses. So excited about the nail wraps! Well, as excited as one can be when unable to breathe fully.

But before nail wraps must come SUPERB OWL MANICURES. Torrey is from Colorado Springs, you see, and I'm from Seattle, and so although I have never in my life watched a Super Bowl game, we decided it would be fun to watch together and sit around pretending to go RAAR RAAR RAAR at each other, since going RAAR RAAR RAAR at the other team's fans is largely the fun of sports. So we gave ourselves the appropriate team color manicures (this was partly the idea of some Colorado co-workers of Torrey's; I believe the losers have to wear the winners' colors for a week) and are getting ready to watch football and eat chips and dip and go YERMOM a lot. I need to re-do my green nail pen; it accidentally mixed with/faded into the grey and also rubbed off some. I don't own any Seahawks clothing, but am wearing grey yoga pants (WITH POCKETS) and a navy blue t-shirt (Disney) which is as close as I can get, really.

Fishy may or may not find his loyalties divided, being from Spokane, as the Seahawks do technically represent Washington state, but Eastern Washington has always held a certain animosity for Western Washington. Or he may just welcome an excuse to make nachos. I think Tony's planning to stay upstairs and snuggle his guitar.

Conflikt was a thing that happened! Much awesome music was delivered, and I got to be a part of a lot of it. It's always a joy to play with/for fabulous musicians. This year we had no concert of our own, but were part of the band for three other concerts (and at the last minute I was part of a fourth). Also managed to set aside more time for actually hanging out and talking with people! Which is something I always feel like there's not enough at cons, so yay! And an old friend showed up unexpectedly, which was a delightful surprise! We have pledged to help each other with motivation to make time for creative things just for pleasure, since we both keep meaning to.

I am SO HAPPY with my drumming lately. Echo the Ashiko was one of the best purchases I ever made! Because it led to my starting to learn how to play it, and that led to us getting Bijou the Djembe (that's her sensible, everyday name) and the stand (Gibraltar is a brand name which has TRUTH IN ADVERTISING let me tell you) and oh WOW, it was SO MUCH FUN this weekend to be someone else's drummer! I like drumming on my own songs, but drumming while singing lead is a particular kind of challenge, and I don't get to be quite as in to either one because it takes more of my brain. Just drumming, I get to let go and just enjoy it. OH WOW THAT IS SO FUN. (This is not going to lead to me getting a drum kit, though, as coordinating all four limbs is a bit much for me. Watch me playing Rock Band sometime. I can do most songs on medium, but once past a certain difficulty level my brain goes FLAIL.)

Also I started a new song. Actually I got the idea when I was walking to work the other day, but I actually started writing it down at Conflikt. So there's that. :)

Down side is that I seem to have brought some mild crud home; I've got a cough that started up sometime last night, and this morning I feel like my lungs have been scoured with sandpaper. (Usually colds hang out in my sinuses for a while before invading my lungs, so at least I seem to have the Cliffs Notes version this time?)

Work continues to be pleasantly boring or boringly pleasant. In that I work for and with nice people, for a company where I'm alone most of the time and everyone else works out of their homes (so for the most part nobody bugs me), and over the course of a long series of different jobs, it's actually the type of work I enjoy most. I've filled up my Administrative Professionals Disney pin lanyard and am now pondering a nice frame/shadowbox for them. The only downside there being that I'm about to do the February 1st payroll today WHERE DID JANUARY GO I'M NOT EVEN USED TO 2014 YET.

Since acquiring a phone that can actually play casual games without crashing, I've been playing them a lot more. Candy Crush Saga and Monster Match are my current obsessions, but I'm always pretty cyclical in that regard, so I'll be back to Pocket Frogs sooner or later. Monster Match especially right now, though. It's basically a Pokemon ripoff + a match more than 3 game, but without the part where you have to play with your monsters and keep them happy. Evolving things is fun! (I'm vixyish on Mobage's game system, should the urge strike you to friend me and/or send me stuff. Actually I don't even know if you can send people stuff.) Also my somewhat obsessive game playing means I drain my batteries a lot faster, so I have phone chargers strategically placed, like, everywhere. Also I never tire of hidden object adventure games on the iPad; I think they sort of hit the Myst-spot in my brain. Big Fish Games, I salute you. :)

The crows are happy to have me back, as always. Lately we've also had a seagull who hangs out on the back porch at home sometimes. I'm trying not to encourage it, because seagulls are HUGE and give no fucks and if I start feeding this seagull on command, I'll have an entire flock of seagulls begging at the back door all the damn time. (And then the big hair and the running away, yes. Torrey and Tony have already beaten you to the jokes, I'm afraid.) So if he's there I don't put out food, but sometimes he shows up anyway when there's crow food. The crows don't fight with him, although they're wary of him, and in fact sometimes they all eat at the same time, but the seagull is like a vacuum cleaner, SCHLOOOOOOOOOOOP and all the food's gone. Then he peers in at us through the windows-- he can clearly see the humans, and has clearly connected that the humans are where the food comes from, as he's done this to both me and Seanan now-- and makes this rather cute sort of clucking/quacking sound. MACK-MACK-MACK. MACK-MACK-MACK. But quietly, for all the world like he's making a polite inquiry. It's really hitting my cute-trained-animal reflex and it's hard not to go "awwww, here you go." But I won't, because of the aforementioned 80s music invasion that would result.

Yelling at two different drivers for being unsafe idiots. One of whom ran a red light as I was crossing. The other of whom honked at a car who had stopped at a stop sign, swerved around said car in order to run the stop sign, turned right and swerved around two "ROAD CLOSED" signs, then detoured into the oncoming lane to get around the heavy machinery and ran the red light to turn right into traffic. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??" did not begin to cover it, but it's what came out of me at the time. What is it about construction zones that turns people into assholes?

Mysterious beeping in my office, which took forever to identify because the odd angle from which it was coming to me made it seem as if it were moving.

Identifying mysterious beeping as a UPS with a "change battery" light flashing.

Shutting down computer, removing dead UPS (heavy!), and figuring out how to make UPS shut the hell up AFTER IT WAS UNPLUGGED.

Rearranging various dusty cables under and behind various dusty places to plug computer, monitor and printer into somewhere else so I could actually start work.

Weird painful paper-cut-like thing on my finger, which I don't know how I even got, since I haven't handled any paperwork yet at this point.

Stupid message from a client, which is too boring to detail, but the situation is aggravatingly stupid.

I really wish I'd taken the day off. But with so much going on this year, I was trying to conserve vacation days, so that there'll be a minimum of time that I need to take off unpaid.

La la la! January is almost over WHERE DID IT GO. Did someone accidentally hit fast-forward?

Conflikt is this weekend and I'm feeling unprepared. Although we have the second of about a billion rehearsals tonight, so by the end of the weekend I should be PREPARED FOR ANYTHING. Or at least anything musical. Or at least these three concerts.(Catch us backing up Sunnie's concert on Friday night, and Betsy's concert and Kaede's concert on Sunday afternoon!)

Earlier this month I had a wonderful trip to Disneyland for Seanan's birthday, from which I have not yet uploaded the photos, because I'm slow like that. Or because of the aforementioned fast-forward.

We also had an absolute ball a couple weeks ago, along with half a dozen other of our favorite musicians, playing at Betsy's CD release concert! If you've not yet heard her CD, Release the Cello, well, you could come to Conflikt this weekend and buy a copy for yourself. (Everybody wants a bit of Betsy!)

And yesterday I bought some boots. My first ever pair of Doc Martens, after hearing so many people rave about them. (Technically I have Docs already, but they are cute purple canvas Mary Janes, not boots.) Also generally my first ever pair of stompy boots. I'm hoping to figure out some good concert outfits with them. And to be using a lot of moleskin while they break in, although they're a softer leather than classic ones. (They're these.)