Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Joanna's #firsttimetaching

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Hey, I know this took me ages and I apologise for
that.I just wanted it to reflect the
EXACT feelings I had all those years ago (which let me tell you took me a while
to remember!)and not just write some
generic crap which sounds good, you know?Anyway, please let me know what you think and more importantly if I got
the gist of what you wanted this to be about.

Thanks again Theodora.J

I remember feeling extremely nervous and
afraid as I walked into my first adult class 20 years ago.I remember thinking that I was nuts to think
I was prepared for this.I had no clue
what I was walking into because I had no formal training.Actually, I had NO training whatsoever,
formal or basic. So, I think my feelings
of trepidation were well justified.

My employer told me that it was a piece of
cake.I had the books and the entire
school’s library at my disposal.There
was one problem though; I had to KNOW what I was doing.I was walking into a classroom filled with
adults who were expecting me to guide them towards their goal. Feeling a great
deal of pressure would be an understatement.

As I look back, it was also the misguided
assumption I had of how I was “supposed” to project myself. I remember thinking
that I wanted to be a “cool” teacher like Michelle Pfeiffer in Dangerous Minds.I mean who wouldn’t want to be like Michelle
Pfeiffer?

However, it takes more than throwing candy
bars at your students, and talking about everything under the sun to create a
feeling of unity/ progress in the classroom.These students were adults who were paying a hefty fee to learn English
because each and every one of them was there for a serious reason and not to be
best buddies with their teacher.My
mistake.

That said, I wasn’t completely in the dark,
I got familiar with the books and knew what my goal was for the year so I tried
to prepare as best I could, yet I still felt that I was missing the main piece
of the puzzle.I felt that whatever I
did just didn’t quite meet my class’s expectations.My lack of formal training always made me
feel that I had to work harder to prove myself.That’s the way I saw it.I know that it’s only natural to feel nervous
when you first start out, but my feelings were magnified because of it.And let me tell you, feelings of inadequacy
don’t do much to boost your confidence.

That has been rectified.I did not continue teaching for a couple of
years, but took courses in teaching to prepare myself and be better qualified
the next time I walked into a classroom.I guess what I’m trying to say is that having the books and going by the
books wasn’t enough to make me a good teacher.For me, it was mandatory to have some type of basic / formal knowledge in
teaching.Just because I’m a native
speaker didn’t mean I was qualified to teach.

In retrospect my first classroom experience
wasn’t the catastrophe I’m making it out to be, but I know that if I had had
some type of training, I would have felt much more confident about my
abilities.