Anger Management

Your heart pounds faster. Fists clench and you feel sweaty palms. Breathing quickens. Impulses threaten to take over and you have a choice to explode in anger or implement self-control. Even though you recognize these signs of anger, the choice to manage responses well doesn’t always come easy.

These same physical reactions and the accompanying choices occur in children. But they are less likely to understand why they feel the way they do and don’t have a clue how to return themselves to normalcy.

Being misunderstood, not getting to do things they want, and feeling disrespected by peers are several points of frustration young children face daily. Yet they rarely have been equipped with proper anger management techniques to prompt a correct response.

Because anger, and its close relative frustration, appear so frequently in young children, it may be helpful to provide them with coping strategies to try the next time the steam begins to rise. Steps towards anger management might include:

Recognizing anger triggers –Not only can we prep them on what events to expect during a day, but we can also walk through potential problem areas to be on guard against.

Identify anger – Once children have a label and words to describe the physical and emotional feelings of anger, understanding when to manage their feelings may come easier.

Stop – If possible, children can keep anger from getting out of control by leaving the stressful situation or separating from the person who the conflict is with.

Calm Down – Returning physically to a normal state will allow children to respond in a mature way. This could include deep breaths, drinking a glass of water, playing alone for a while, or distracting themselves through another activity.

Think about actions – After calm has returned, children might want to take actions like talking to an adult or finding another way to become understood. It’s important to understand aggression will not produce a desired outcome.

Implement constructive solution – This step of resolution might come in the form of an apology or agreeing to a compromise.

Empowering young children with these steps for managing anger gives them an outlet for emotions they may not know how to handle. And of course these methods aren’t just for kids. Seeing appropriate responses to anger from role models in their lives could be the most effective tool in the box.