Today, my apartment complex added $250 to the $1,000 my roomate and I already owe because of an unauthorized pet and complaints from neighbors that our dog barks all night long. We don't have a dog, we don't even have a pet. FML

Record a dog barking, load it up to a CD, buy earmuffs, load said CD into your computer, turn volume all the way up, let CD play on "loop" for the entire night as you sleep like a baby with your brand new earmuffs.