'GQ' magazine calls for the digital burning of the Bible

The editors of GQ magazine want you to know they are important. And, next time you’re tweezing your eyebrows before an avocado facial and a shopping spree at the mall, you should read a book! But not any book. And certainly not Mark Twain, Thomas Pynchon, Jonathan Franzen, Ernest Hemingway or J.D. Salinger.

Don’t read Catch 22 or Dracula or Lord of the Rings or --- unbelievably --- Lonesome Dove, one of the most poignant, inspiring depictions of life in the Wild American West. Although the editors at GQ consider it part of “the cowboy mythos, with its rigid masculine emotional landscape, glorification of guns and destruction, and misogynistic gender roles is a major factor in the degradation of America.”

All of these masterpieces are part of GQ’s recent listicle, “21 Books You Don’t Have to Read.” It’s not an editorial. It’s not by a freelancer. It’s a listicle by the editors of the magazine. A list of books that should be “digitally burned.”

Number 12 is the Holy Bible. Here are the editors’ (extremely self-celebrating) words on the subject:

The Holy Bible is rated very highly by all the people who supposedly live by it but who in actuality have not read it. Those who have read it know there are some good parts, but overall it is certainly not the finest thing that man has ever produced. It is repetitive, self-contradictory, sententious, foolish, and even at times ill-intentioned. If the thing you heard was good about the Bible was the nasty bits, then I propose Agota Kristof's The Notebook, a marvelous tale of two brothers who have to get along when things get rough. The subtlety and cruelty of this story is like that famous sword stroke (from below the boat) that plunged upward through the bowels, the lungs, and the throat and into the brain of the rower.

Instead, they argue, you should read The Notebook by Agota Kristof. Ah, yes, The Notebook, a novel about a group of actors who travel Europe after the completion of their most recent play. The part where the novel’s main characters, two twin boys, are forced to move in with their grandmother, that part certainly has the cultural gravity and historical importance of the crucifixion of Christ or the birth of existence or the creation of language or the formation of life.

It’s hard to imagine what any Western Literature would look like without the Bible.

If anything, the list serves as a verification of the best writing available. Mark Twain’s Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Two of Hemingway’s best works: Old Man and the Sea and A Farewell to Arms. Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy, one of the greatest novels of our time, a terrifying Western and historical document, which also happens to base much of its content on the Bible.

In fact, it’s hard to imagine what any Western literature would look like without the Bible. It’s hard to imagine what life itself would look like without the Bible. What a strange contrarian world progressives have created. Hopefully, they don’t gut our culture and humanity before they realize the damage they’ve done.

Is this what inclusivity and tolerance look like? Fox News host Tomi Lahren was at a weekend brunch with her mom in Minnesota when other patrons started yelling obscenities and harassing her. After a confrontation, someone threw a drink at her, the moment captured on video for social media.

President Donald Trump has done a remarkable job of keeping his campaign promises so far. From pulling the US from the Iran Deal and Paris Climate Accord to moving the US Embassy to Jerusalem, the president has followed through on his campaign trail vows.

“It's quite remarkable. I don't know if anybody remembers, but I was the guy who was saying he's not gonna do any of those things," joked Glenn on “The News and Why it Matters," adding, “He has taken massive steps, massive movement or completed each of those promises … I am blown away."

“I am so sorry," she apologized when Lamar pointed out that she needed to “bleep" that word. “I'm used to singing it like you wrote it." She was booed at by the crowd of people, many screaming “f*** you" after her mistake.

On Tuesday's show, Pat and Jeffy watched the clip and talked about some of the Twitter reactions.

“This is ridiculous," Pat said. “The situation with this word has become so ludicrous."

As Pat pointed out while sitting in for Glenn on today's show, Tur tried to “badger" Paxton into vowing that he would push for a magical fix that will make schools “100 percent safe." She found it “just wild" that the Texas attorney general couldn't promise that schools will ever be completely, totally safe.