7 ways new MLB commissioner Rob Manfred can improve baseball

On Thursday, MLB owners elected Rob Manfred to succeed retiring Bud Selig as the sport’s new commissioner, according to a report from USA TODAY Sports’ Bob Nightengale. In his first days on the job, Manfred will inevitably hear suggestions from every corner for how to improve the game. This is one corner, and here are seven suggestions:

1. Move it along!

OK, this one’s for real, and real simple: Enforce the rule that says pitchers can only hold onto the ball for 12 seconds between pitches when no one’s on base. Long baseball games are fine if they’re filled with actual baseball action, but there’s just not a lot of upside to letting pitchers futz around on the mound like goons when they should be pitching. Same for batters needlessly stepping out of the box. Seriously, just… move it along already.

2. Introduce a new logo

You want to make the sport appeal to kids? Try a swift rebranding. Instead of the boring batter logo that’s now 45 years old, freshen things up with the enduring face of baseball, Bartolo Colon. This is going to sell some T-shirts, I promise:

(COMPOSITE: Major League Baseball/USA TODAY Sports Images)

3. Distribute actual oppo tacos

A taco. (PHOTO: TacoBell.com)

I made this suggestion for the Home Run Derby but apparently it fell on deaf ears: When players hit opposite-field home runs — “oppo tacos,” as they’re sometimes known — they should be rewarded with actual tacos to celebrate. Ideally, the third-base coach keeps a few tacos stashed in his back pocket and hands one off as the player is rounding the base. Then when he reaches home plate, he needs to stand there and eat the entire taco and Brian McCann just has to deal with it.

4. Unlimited pine tar

(William Perlma/THE STAR-LEDGER via USA TODAY Sports)

Yankees pitcher Michael Pineda found himself in a sticky mess in April when he flouted the league’s oft-ignored rule against the use of pine tar, a substance perhaps most famous for costing George Brett a home run in 1983. Want to end those controversies? Unlimited pine tar for everyone. If a guy wants to slather himself with it from head to toe, hey, that’s his business — and his subsequent acne issues, probably. Even with all the tobacco chewing and dirt kicking, baseball could be way grimier. Plus, defenders would never make errors if the ball just stuck to them like they had Velcro uniforms. (Note: Velcro uniforms also worth considering.)

5. Live bands for closers

James Hetfield of Metallica. (Jason O. Watson/Getty Images)

In an ideal world, the largely overrated role of the one-inning closer would be eliminated entirely. But since in-game strategy seems beyond the scope of the new commissioner, he might as well go with it. Let one pitcher per team hire a live band to perform his entrance music in his home park. I’m talking fog machines, laser light show, pyrotechnics — an entire concert experience to herald his every appearance. Any band he and his team can afford, playing any style of music he chooses. TIP: A string quartet might be pretty cool.

6. Juice some balls

(USA TODAY Sports Images)

Offensive numbers in the game keep declining with no obvious end in sight. The solution? Juiced balls. But not every ball — that’d be stupid. Just one juiced ball per team per game, issued by the umpire at the start of a predetermined but undisclosed inning, and used until it is hit out of the park or out of play. Foul back your one juiced ball? Bad luck, bro. That’s baseball. You need to make the most of your chances in this game.

7. Make every guy Mike Trout

(USA TODAY Sports Images)

One of the biggest problems facing baseball in 2014 is that Mike Trout only exists in one human form. Time to end that: Begin the process of cloning an army of Mike Trouts so that every guy can be Mike Trout and we can all watch baseball the way it was meant to be played. Clayton Kershaws can play too, peppering in some Yasiel Puigs to keep things exciting. Also, naturally, Bartolos Colon. Dude’s on the logo, after all.

MLB’s new steward will hear tons of suggestions for improving the game. Here are some of them.

I found this on FTW and wanted to share:
%link%
For more great sports stories ...
*visit For The Win: https://www.ftw.usatoday.com
*follow @ForTheWin: https://www.twitter.com/forthewin
*like FTW on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/usatodayftw