Lollapalooza 2011 Lineup Makes Me Rethink Music Festivals

For a multitude of reasons, I've never been tempted to try to attend a music festival. There's the travel, the expense, the hours of sitting through bands that suck in order to hear the ones that don't, and the people—my god, the PEOPLE. Massive crowds of sweaty unwashed people enjoying a variety of mind-altering substances known for removing one's ability to respect personal space.

(Yes, I realize I sound 87 years old. Shut up.)

Lollapalooza's 2011 lineup just may have changed my mind, though. I still hate the idea of crowds and lines for unspeakably filthy Porta-Potties and being exposed to neo-hippies with professionally-styled dreadlocks and weird festival names that sound like Australian slang for illegal sexual positions ("Coachella"? "Bonnaroo"?), but Lollapalooza's 20th anniversary event sounds absolutely amazing.

Ready for a road trip to Chi-Town? Here's what's playing on August 5-7 in Chicago’s Grant Park: