Tag Archives: responsibility

Reward & Punishment Techniques for the Mind

I realized I did this (Mind bets) all the time, but I wasn’t aware of the succinct term until recently, due to listening to an interview with Ray Romano (of ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’ fame). Apparently, Ray constantly challenges himself with these bets; as quote in a New York Times article:

he referred to as “mind bets,” a reward and punishment technique he developed to replace his own wagering habit. “I set a personal goal, like, ‘If I don’t break a 90 at golf, then I can’t watch TV for a week,’ and I get as pumped up as if I had $1,000 on a bet,” he said.New York Times, 2009

In comparison, I do these mind bets in order to really test my Will power at the end of the day. To challenge what I can actually go through and manage – maybe I am testing myself for one day becoming tortured for information by Guerillas in a desolate jungle and resisting the interrogation methods of my captors (Yes, I’m extreme). But in more probable terms I believe that I conduct these mind bets in an attempt to keep the mind in a state of readiness; to not be so complacent – the future is unpredictable and I may have to go through something that will take a lit of units of Will power to get through. And with anything, practice is a necessity for success.

If you have any Mind bets that you’d like to share, please share in the comments.

Is Chivalry Dead?

So you were able to persuade the girl of your dreams in going on a date with you, perfect. Things are going well, you give her your magic charm, she is smiling & laughing (hopefully not at you), the food is good, and you end up paying, and you take her home. Good Stuff. But the cycle of you paying for the meal after the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and to the 10th date, starts to leave you wondering, “When is she going to pay for the date?”. And this is the question that is the fuel for debate, and equally the source of arguments as some women, regardless of how long they have been dating their Man, refuse to pay for dates. Chivalry is not dead, is it? Yes, Men should do certain things, but we also live in an age of equality – with the rise of Feminism, women desire & want to be treated as equal, as they should be. But in some facets of life, they still want the Man to ‘take care’ of certain things such as dates – even if they are in a long-term committed relationship or even married.

A lot has been said also on whom initiates the date – meaning that if the Man asks the Woman out, then the Man should pay – I can understand that. But after awhile, once a mutual understanding is established, and once both parties are interested in each other, then that is when things such as dates should start being shared, right? This video illustrates the differing views between males & females on whom should pay for date – hilarity ensues as most women will stick to their guns that women should NEVER pay for dates, and where Men are always trying to walk that fine line of ‘wishing/hoping’ that women eventually start sharing or paying their ‘fair share’.

Poor Tiger

This story keeps unfolding and getting worse for Tiger Woods, but with most public tragedies come some creative humor – at the expense of some. The ‘mashup’ is the new trend, so the following are some funny mashup videos as people have likened Tiger to famous/infamous cheaters such as Shaq, Kobe, Chris Brown, Mike Tyson, Bill Clinton … and the list goes on.

Reaction vs. Responding

Spectrum of reasoning

I was listening to some talk show podcast, and they were debating the pros and cons of reacting vs. responding; at first I thought that they were pretty much the same in definition; a course of action after an event, but upon further research, the conceps are evolved. A reaction can be likened upon an impulsive action focused on a narrow part of the overall situation, usually to the exclusion of larger goals and objectives. Whereas a response can be defined as a wiser course of action that considers the complexities of people and circumstances; responses aims to accomplish goals based on a more through understanding of the whole situation.

Thus, it is safe to say that responding should be the ideal course of response for us mortals, however I believe, and I am sure that many of you probably agree, that we tend to react more than we respond. We fly off the handle, don’t take time to carefully think about the gravity of situations, and our reactions cause tension, animosity, and hate – from others. To give a medical analogy, consider a patient; the patient goes in to their Doctor for a follow-up visit – let’s say that the patient has improved since the last visit, the Doctor will say that your body is ‘responding’ to the treatment/drug. Whereas, if the patient visits the Doctor, and the patient is sick, the Doctor will say that their body is ‘reacting’ to some virus. Thus, this concept of reacting vs. responding can be compared to a negative vs. positive contrast or even further, it can be compared to degrees of reasoning. Many people in your lives who are hot-headed, easily tempered, it would be safe to say react to situations; while those who take time to deliberate the pros and cons, look at the glass both half-full and half-empty, are probably ones to respond to situations.

The classic and most modern example of reaction vs. respond is when President Obama ‘sonned’ a White House reporter in March 2009 when Obama was asked why he didn’t react sooner regarding the AIG fiasco; Obama replied “I like to know what I am talking about before I give a response”.

Life 101

Taxes, Leasing, and Not pissing off the man

There are many things that we learn in high school that we probably will never utilize in our adult lives; like Geography, History, Chemistry, Biology – unless you plan to to practice in one of those disciplines, chances are, the information will be useless to you. However, there are some things that I thought about that we all need to learn no matter if you are just going to start working after high school or are planning post secondary education.

Taxes:

This whole Western System is essentially designed for people to support the government. We go to school to equip us with the skills to work, and as we work, we pay taxes to the government, which in turn the government uses to provide social services. So, if taxes are going to be something that we are going to have to do until the end of our lives, why don’t we provide a mandatory tax preparation course so that we all can get a better idea to fill-out those retarded difficult forms.

Leasing:
So many young adults get pulled into the idea that Leasing is so easy; I know many who lease everything from their cars, apartment, electronic equipment, et cetera. Leasing fulfills the appetite of those people that ‘must have'; they must have the latest car, technology, fashion, and the like. But most don’t understand compound and principal interest that are key elements of leasing agreements. If people learned about what ‘leasing’ really comprises if, then we can probably reduce the amount of young adults who go into debt or have their items repossessed because of debt.

How to NOT piss off the Man:

If you are black or Latino, listen up here. This should definitely be taught like every year of High School; especially for males. The ‘Man’ in this term is for the law enforcement officers, and the golden rule is ‘respect’. When you are pulled over, whether you feel it was warranted or not, just answer the officer’s question with common courtesy and respect. Using vulgarity and having a rude attitude will get you nowhere.

I am sure there are other Life 101 skills that need to be a mandatory component of high schools, if you have any ideas, share your thoughts.

The Financial Times of RappersVirtues: financial responsibility, planning, guidance

Let’s see how the ‘Greatest Rapper Alive’ handles his money:

Here’s a snippet from The Smoking Gun:According to a lawsuit filed last month by businessman LeMarck deAndre, Lil Wayne (real name: Dwayne Carter) agreed to pay at least $120,000 for the repair and refurbishment of a 1999 Bentley, which is pictured below. However, after the 25-year-old rapper belatedly paid $78,000 for work on his ride, deAndre contends, Carter refused any further payments. deAndre’s December 18 Alameda Superior Court complaint, which you’ll find here, charges that Carter owes nearly $80,000 in fees for the storage of the burgundy Bentley, which apparently was going to be shipped from northern California to Louisiana, home to Carter and Cash Money Records, the label Carter headed until last year.

So what’s Wayne’s reason for not paying? deAndre says he never gave him one and people in Cash Money stopped answering his calls. But interestingly enough, Wayne was negotiating a publishing deal for several hundred thousand dollars around the same time he had this $120k+ worth of work done to this car. So, in typical Lil Wayne behavior, he was spending money he didn’t have yet. And it backfired. Peep the 7 page complaint for damages here. Interestingly enough, I’m also told that the Bentley was originally a gift from his “Daddy” Baby and was signed over in Dwayne Carter’s name. Why Baby gave Wayne a Bentley he had to pay the bills on himself is beyond me…but not surprising. Meanwhile, Lil Wayne is threatening to blame this whole incident on his managers, but his managers say Wayne frequently ignored their advice and/or just didn’t tell them about his purchases.

——d.b says:
Well, if this claim is true, it will just be another example of how the young, rich, and powerful are not financially astute. It could also say that these artists’ have a circle around them that are not looking out for their best interests. Or, it could be that these artists’ are just stupid and even though they are presented with the education and skills to manage their money, they are mentally unequipped to handle such a capacity.

The ‘Best Rapper Alive’ may need the best ‘Debt Consolidation’ Agent alive.

Jart is a graphic designer. He thinks that he is very trendy and hip. Jart has a funky style; his clothes are a bit different in the cut, design, and the colors. Jart’s musical tastes are very trendy as he stays away from ‘mainstream’ music; Jart’s not into the current hip-hop/rock, but more into classic/underground hip-hop, trance, house, and other rare music. Jart’s differences makes him unique; and Jart uses such differences to set him a part from others, because not only dp his differences in his personality deviate him from the norm, but his skills/abilities are also in a ‘class of their own’ – or so that is what Jart believes. You see, the combination of good skills/abilities with his unique distinction from the norm makes Jart a ‘gassed’ individual, Jart thinks he knows much more than you, Jart believes that he is superior to you – and most times, hey, Jart could be right (that’s sarcasm for you). You see, over the years Jart has been told how much his work is ‘hot’ and ‘nice’ and other accolades; thus Jart does not know how to handle adversity well; you see, Jart believes that any static with a client is not because Jart is doing something wrong, but because the client does not understand Jart’s greatness.

I knew a Jart, he was definitely a Jart; to the ‘T’, from the tight pants, neon pink shoes w/ matching hat, MacBook Pro, and backpack. This Jart was commissioned to design an interface for my company, he was going to be well compensated for his work (he was), but this Jart was a Bitch – couldn’t handle criticism, when we pointed out flaws in his work, he couldn’t accept that he did anything wrong, but blamed the problem on us. Jart ducked meetings, lied about things, didn’t write down our notes (even though we asked him too), and Jart avoided certain members of my group (including me) because we were too critical of his work. What killed me is that this Jart Bitch was being paid handsomely for work (Jart got paid consistently and on time), and yet he treated us like … well, you know (Check the title of this piece). One of my associated blasted Jart in an introspective essay, a blast so hard that I felt sorry for Jart, and Jart is a bitch; in the fact that he treated us with dis-respect, and took us for fools.

In retrospect, I’ve learned some things about Jart; his behavior, movements, and other nuances. Jart’s experience with us was not pleasant, but I don’t know if Jart realized the error in his ways in his tight-ass pants and pink attire, but I do know that Jart will think twice again before he treats people like silly monkeys.

Christmas is that time of the year to give thanks, spend time with your loved ones, and to reflect on the past and the future. We give thanks to faith, family, and friends that help us map our course through life. But I want to give thanks to a class of people that serves a useful purpose for society – the haters. I was trying to find a definition of the word ‘hater’ at urbandictonary.com, but some of the entries were a bit out there, so I will not define it in a statement, but in the following dialogue:

Give thanks to haters for …
– without them, we wouldn’t second-guess ourselves and question our judgment
– for doubting our abilities and reducing our confidence in ourselves
– for distracting us from the ‘eye on the prize’ with their ‘hataration’
– making fun of Britney (though may be warranted), but for also trivializing public breakdowns such as the fate of Amy Winehouse
– for taking hip-hop culture to another level as deliberate acts of a ‘beatdown’ of a rap artist was put on YouTube
– above all, wasting our time procrastinating, thinking; helping us to avoid our fears, goals, and challenges because of the ‘seed’ that you have put in our mind – the seed of doubt, that grows with each passing of a thought such as ‘maybe I can’t do it’, or ‘maybe I shouldn’t, because’.

Haters don’t do much damage as we do to ourselves, but let’s give thanks to them because without them, we wouldn’t realize that our full potential is greater than what they could ever imagine and/or hate on.

Its sort of wicked what happened to Michal Vick, but he is a victim of his own ignorance.

Michael Vick was on top of the world, he was an all-star Quarterback with the NFL’s Atlanta Falcons, with the right team chemistry, Vick could have gone on to win several NFL championships as he is a unique quarterback that can throw, run, and get out of the ‘pocket’ (football term).

However, it is unfortunate that Vick felt the need to engage in Dog fights which resulted in a 23-month jail sentence conviction. As details emerged about Vick’s dog fighting events that happened in his estate, it became apparent that Vick would do some jail time for his crimes, but I never thought he would have gotten so much time – 2 years is a lot for dog fighting. Dog fighting is inhumane, violent, and barbaric – I get that, but in the case of Michael Vick, does the ‘punishment fit the crime’? Would someone without his status receive the same sentence? Probably not, and what is even more disturbing is that there have been sport celebrities that have committed more violent crimes against humanity that have received lesser & lenient sentences. For example, NHL hockey player Dany Heatley received 3 years probation for vehicular homicide after a drunk driving incident. In comparison, a drunk driving incident that results in death deserves 3 years probation (no jail time), but a victimless human crime results in 2 years in solitary confinement? Something doesn’t seem right about that.

Now, I’m not excusing Vick’s behavior because dog fighting is against the law, and he should be punished for his actions, but what is probably the most disturbing aspect of this story that is not receiving any light, is the fact that many sport athletes and celebrities foolishly spend their money and engage in activities that are problematic. I guess its the fact that many of these athlete’s come from marginalized backgrounds, and when they are doused with a whole bunch of money; they simply act-out irresponsibly. It happened to Mike Tyson, which is really sad, because he had millions of dollars, but spent his money on foolish items and lavish luxuries; with no regard for ‘saving for a rainy day’. And with Vick, he was making millions of dollars a year, and yet he felt the need to earn extra money with dog fighting; which was only pulling in thousands of dollars a year.

Its sad, because Vick had so much potential, but threw it all away because he simply didn’t ‘grow up'; which is the problem with most celebrities (i.e. Britney, and so on), and know the system is showing him that just as much as they can bring you up, they can bring you down.