Hollywood director John Turteltaub once spent $1,200 (£800) on a Las Vegas stripper without getting a lap dance. Turteltaub directs Michael Douglas, Robert De Niro and Morgan Freeman in buddy comedy Last Vegas but insists his own memories of life in Sin City are not pleasant.
The director enjoyed a civilised conversation with a dancer and even gave her a foot massage, but he was too scared of the venue's security officers to argue when he was presented with a huge bill.
He tells Variety, "I spent $1,200. Instead of getting a lap dance from a stripper, I rubbed her feet and talked about where she wants to go to college... I didn't want a lap dance. She sat down. I rubbed her feet. When I was done, they gave me a bill. What am I supposed to do? There are big scary men there."

CBS
When you watch a show, there's a good chance you'll see at least one woman who is there solely to be rescued by a man. Person of Interest takes that idea and stomps on it. This past week's episode had not one, not two but three women, heck, even four if you count one of the villains, who could dismantle a man even before he knew what was happening.
First,we have Joss Carter, a police detective who was busted down to patrolwoman due to a inside crime ring within the police department having a grudge against her getting too close to solving what is going on. She's a tough, no-nonsense woman who is a single mother to a child. Taraji P. Henson imbues her with a fierceness but also a soft side underneath that and is capable of being 'girly' if she has to be.
Then there is Zoe Morgan. She plays a 'fixer' of sorts. If someone or a company is in trouble, she comes in and does what she needs to do. Originally she was one of the people that the Machine designated as someone Reese and Finch needed to save, but she proved more than capable of handling herself and has come in on several of their other cases. She and Reese seem to have a no-strings attached sexual relationship. There's definitely chemistry between the actress, Paige Turco, and Jim Caviezel, who plays Reese. It's not like she sits around and waits for him to call, though.
Rounding off the 'good guys' is Samantha Shaw, who is the least feminine out of them (despite being played by the charming Sarah Shahi). She's a former paramilitary officer who tracked down terrorists before she was recruited by Finch and Reese. She's the wild card out of the bunch - an admitted sociopath who can kill people without compunction. In one of the more recent episodes, she had to be coached by Carter and Morgan about expressing her femininity. I believe the phrase, "Smile!" was used more than once.
In the bad guy camp, Amy Acker has been playing an enigmatic hacker who goes by the name Root. She's been a particular thorn in Finch's side since the end of the first season and it looks like she just escaped her confinement again. She always has things under control and even wound up shooting a veteran assassin at the end a recent episode. There was a tinge of regret in her voice when she found out she had to spare the assassin. It's going to be interesting to see Shaw find Root again since the two had a very unique first introduction where Root tortured Shaw (who actually seemed to be enjoying it).
So.. remember the saying, "You wouldn't want to meet him in a dark alley"? Well, we can say the same for these women.
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Showtime
Warning: The following article contains spoilers to that terrible, terrible Dexter finale.
If you thought Dexter the friendly serial killer would receive some comeuppance for the eight seasons that he strolled around Miami Dade County, dealing out his own brand of vigilante justice, you thought wrong. Faithful Dexter fans were greeted to a series finale that saw our favorite bloodspatter expert sailing out into a hurricane, only to find new life as a grisly mountain man in a cabin. Many were disappointed with the rather toothless way the Dexter writers decided to end the character's story, but the producer is now throwing blame at the network.
In a recent interview with Vulture, Dexter producer John Goldwyn said that Showtime had prohibited them from killing Dexter in the final episode. Goldwyn said, "They won't let us kill him… Showtime was very clear about that. When we told them the arc for the last season, they just said, 'Just to be clear, he's going to live.' There were a lot of endings discussed because it was a very interesting problem to solve, to bring it to a close. People have a relationship with Dexter, even if it doesn't have the size and the ferocity of the fan base for Breaking Bad. But it has a very core loyal following."
While of course the Dexter writers should have been given complete creative freedom with regards to how to handle the ending of the show and the fate of its its titular character, there must have been a better way to end the series while keeping Dexter alive than giving him a beard and throwing him into a forest. I mean, seriously. He's a lumberjack, and that's not okay.
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Michael Jackson's former backing singer Judith Hill has signed up to join Josh Groban on tour. The new Sony artist will open the show and also join Groban during his set for two songs, The Prayer and Remember When It Rains, after teaming up with the operatic star in the studio.
Hill, who has also backed Stevie Wonder and Sir Elton John, was working with the King of Pop on his This Is It dates when he died in 2009.
Since then, she has performed on U.S. reality TV show The Voice and appeared in director Morgan Neville's acclaimed 20 Feet From Stardom documentary, which shines the spotlight on the untold true story of the back-up singers behind some of music's biggest names.
Her North American dates with Groban begin on Wednesday (02Oct13) in Boise, Idaho.

ABC
Look on the television: it’s a bird! It’s a plane! No, it’s just another superero TV show. While the track record of superhero TV is spotty (for every one Smallville there are twoBirds of Prey), networks keep piling on to make new shows about earth’s mightest heroes.
The box office success of superhero films might have a thing or two to do with this small screen revolution. Still, if superheroes are your thing you’ll soon have plenty of viewing options during the week. (Unless your thing is female superheroes, and then you’re still screwed.)
The Current Shows:
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.Coming on the heels of the box office-busting The Avengers, this drama by Joss and Jed Whedon has already resulted in huge ratings for ABC. Coulson lives!
ArrowThis CW drama about the Green Arrow filled the Smallville-sized hole in the network’s superhero programming. It was also one of the best dramas of last season and introduced us all to Stephen Amell.
The Upcoming Shows:
Gotham: The TV ShowBefore Batman came on the scene the only one fighting crime in Gotham city was police commissioner Gordon. This upcoming show on FOX will take a look at Gordon’s early years, pre-Bat, and introduce some of the most famous villains in Batman mythology.
The Flash: The ShowSince Arrow is doing so well, it only makes sense that the CW network would want to capture a little more of that lighting in a bottle. Enter (speedily) The Flash. Based on the superhero with more than Olympic speed, the show will be helmed by the same showrunners who already found superhero success with Arrow.
ConstantinePerhaps a less-known property, John Constantine is still a long-running DC universe character. Now NBC is looking to develop a show around the Hellblazer character with Dark Knight scribe David Goyer at the helm. Will Constantine have enough name reconigition to give NBC the hit they so deperately need?
What do you think? Which show are you looking forward to the most? Share in the comments!
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Steven Soderbergh's Liberace biopic Behind The Candelabra was the big winner at the 65th annual Emmy Awards, picking up major honours for the director, his leading man Michael Douglas, and landing the night's Outstanding Miniseries or Movie prize. The TV film was also honoured by Sir Elton John during the ceremony - he dedicated his new song Home Again to Liberace as part of a tribute to the flamboyant pianist.
He said, "This year a television film about a musician scored 50 Emmy nominations... That musician was Liberace and this guy played a mean piano. His programme aired in England and I was keenly aware of his enormous talent and his impact on the musical world and my dress sense, of course."
Douglas played the gay entertainer in the film and Matt Damon his lover, Scott Thorson. Both stars were nominated for Outstanding Lead Actor In A Miniseries Or A Movie, and Douglas heaped praise on his co-star as he accepted the honour.
He said, "This was a two-hander and Matt, you're only as good as your other hand... You were magnificent and the only reason I'm standing here is because of you, so you really deserve half of this, so do you want the bottom or the top?"
Otherwise, the 2013 Emmys were full of surprises - Merritt Wever and Tony Hale beat a host of favourites to claim the Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series and Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series trophies for Nurse Jackie and Veep, respectively, at the start of the ceremony, and Claire Danes and Bonny Cannavale were shock winners in the Outstanding Lead Actress In A Drama Series (Homeland) and Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series (Boardwalk Empire) categories.
Double winners on the night included The Big Bang Theory, Veep, Homeland and Breaking Bad, which was named the Best Drama Series. The big snubs included Mad Men, Game of Thrones and Downton Abbey, which failed to pick up a single award.
Highlights included Carrie Underwood's Beatles tribute to 1963 and the impact the news from that year had on America, host Neil Patrick Harris' mid-show song-and-dance number with actor Nathan Fillion and comedienne Sarah Silverman and Will Ferrell's comic climax - he ambled onto the stage at the Nokia Theatre in shorts, sandals and a T-shirt with three kids to present the night's Outstanding Drama Series and Outstanding Comedy Series awards and joked, "Unfortunately Helen Mirren and Maggie Smith dropped out at the last second and they (Emmy producers) called me, literally, 45 minutes ago, and I couldn't find childcare.
"We had a soccer game, there was a neighbour's birthday party, a nut allergy, I didn't have time to do my hair."
Ferrell kept a straight face as he bickered with the three kids about their use of electronics and the need to use the restroom while onstage.
The winners list is:
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Merritt Wever - Nurse Jackie
Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series
Tina Fey & Tracey Wigfield - 30 Rock
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Tony Hale - Veep
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Julia Louis-Dreyfus - Veep
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series
Melissa Leo - Louie
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Comedy Series
Bob Newhart - The Big Bang Theory
Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series
Gail Mancuso - Modern Family
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Jim Parsons - The Big Bang Theory
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Miniseries Or A Movie
Laura Linney - The Big C: Hereafter
Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series
Henry Bromell - Homeland
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Anna Gunn - Breaking Bad
Outstanding Reality - Competition Program
The Voice
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Bobby Cannavale - Boardwalk Empire
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Jeff Daniels - The Newsroom
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Claire Danes - Homeland
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Drama Series
Carrie Preston - The Good Wife
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Drama Series
Dan Bucatinsky - Scandal
Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series
David Fincher - House of Cards
Outstanding Writing for a Variety Series
The Colbert Report
Outstanding Directing for a Variety Series
Don Roy King - Saturday Night Live
Outstanding Choreography
Dancing With The Stars - Derek Hough
Outstanding Host For A Reality or Reality-Competition Program
Heidi Klum & Tim Gunn - Project Runway
Outstanding Variety Series
The Colbert Report
Outstanding Writing for a Miniseries, Movie or a Dramatic Special
Abi Morgan - The Hour
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Miniseries Or A Movie
James Cromwell - American Horror Story: Asylum
Outstanding Directing For A Miniseries, Movie or a Dramatic Special
Steven Soderbergh - Behind the Candelabra
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Miniseries or a Movie
Ellen Burstyn - Political Animals
Outstanding Lead Actor In A Miniseries or a Movie
Michael Douglas - Behind the Candelabra
Outstanding Miniseries or Movie
Behind the Candelabra
Outstanding Drama Series
Breaking Bad
Outstanding Comedy Series
Modern Family.

John Lamparski/WireImage
Seth Meyers announced his new Weekend Update co-host this week, and we're feeling pretty good about this choice. Cecily Strong joined the Saturday Night Live cast just last year, and this high-profile gig surely came her way because of the huge impact she's made in her short tenure on the show. She excels at creating memorable characters; the common element in most of the successful recurring sketches that were established in the '12-'13 season was Cecily. She's already visited the Update desk as several characters; and no matter who she's playing, she and Seth have great comic chemistry.
Let's look back at Cecily's greatest hits from Season 38 and know that our fake news fate is in good hands.
The Girlfriends Talk Show
Cecily taps into our childhood insecurities with this one. She plays peppy Kyra, who hosts a teen talk show with her less-cool best friend Morgan (Aidy Bryant). She and her new, "awesome" girlfriend (Jennifer Lawrence and Anne Hathaway, so far) continually undermine poor Morgan until she's practically seething. Remember high school? That was fun.
"We're not porn stars anymore!"
The former-porn-stars-do-a-commercial sketch never fails, mostly because Strong and Vanessa Bayer have perfectly the ladies' signature garbled delivery ("Aff-lence. lux-ry. Mo-ey Chamben.") and blank-eyed stares. It's also an opportunity for the writers to trot out their best one-liners ("One time I did a weird shoot in Mexico. Two of the girls died, but I'm alive. Thanks, champagne!") and for hosts like Justin Timberlake and Ben Affleck to put on some short-shorts and tap into their Boogie Nights fantasies.
Dana and Niff
Dana (Strong) and Niff (Bobby Moynihan) are sure that they're getting fired (from McDonald's or Barnes and Noble, depending on the episode), so they take that opportunity to air their personal greivances with all their co-workers. ("I know you copied those Mad Libs, Beverly. Ain't nobody that funny.") It kills, because the two deliver every insult with panache and committment and because we all, especially on our worst days, daydream about doing the same.
The Girl You Wish You Hadn't Started a Conversation With at a Party
The one and only downside to having Cecily as a Weekend Update co-host is that we will likely say goodbye to her most popular character, who cares too much about humankind's greatest problems to even find out what they are. Who will remind Seth to "learn a book" or ask the tough questions like, "What are we even doing? And like, don't"? Our world will be a much poorer, less socially-conscious place, but it's the price we'll have to pay.
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HBO might have sentenced vampire drama True Blood to the true death after next season, the show’s seventh, but we’ll always have the memories. True Blood helped redefine supernatural shows, making it acceptable to mix standard drama elements with high camp.
John P Johnson
So let’s see the fangers out in style by remembering some of the show’s greatest and weirdest moments:
Sookie and Bill Kiss For The First TimeThis is where it all started, when telepathic waitress Sookie Stackhouse met southern gentleman vampire Bill Compton. Their chemistry was hard to deny, even for actors Stephen Moyer and Anna Paquin, who ended up a real-life couple.
Eric Goes Up In FlamesEric may be hot but he’s never been this hot before. As last season of True Blood drew to a close we saw a very, very naked Eric sunbathing. But we could only enjoy the view for a moment, as suddenly our favorite Viking vampire caught flame.
Godric Meets The SunEric’s vampire maker Godric was a centuries old vampire ready to die. The scene where he decided to meet the sun, with Sookie standing by watching, was one of the show’s most emotional and spectacular.
Franklin Can Text Really FastSookie’s best friend Tara has had some of the worst luck on the show, and that’s really saying something for a cast of characters this disaster-prone. When unhinged vampire Franklin falls for Tara, he takes her hostage and tries to impress her by showing off his superior texting skills.
Russell Edgington Makes NewsOne of the greatest True Blood characters was definitely drama queen vampire Russell Edgington, played with great flare by Denis O’Hare. After Eric kills his lover Talbot, Russell makes a splashy entrance on live TV by eviscerating a news anchor. “Now time for the weather. Tiffany!”
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Actor Michael Douglas was the toast of the GQ Awards in London on Tuesday night (03Sep13) as he was crowned Legend of the Year. A week after his separation from wife Catherine Zeta-Jones was announced, a solo Douglas was beaming as he picked up the accolade at the publication's annual Men of the Year ceremony, held at the Royal Opera House in the British capital.
Douglas, who flew in from the Venice Film Festival in Italy, was handed the prize by Samuel L. Jackson, while Sir Elton John was given the Genius award by terminally-ill rocker Wilko Johnson, and Doctor Who actor Matt Smith handed Noel Gallagher the Icon trophy.
Downton Abbey's Dan Stevens picked up Most Stylish Man, Pharrell Williams got lucky landing Performer of the Year, rockers Arctic Monkeys nabbed Band of the Year and Lou Reed was hailed the Inspiration of the Year.
Accepting her trophy for Woman of the Year, former Harry Potter actress Emma Watson joked, "Given the perilousness in the journey from child star to adult, any award with woman in the title is frankly a relief!"
Watson's My Week with Marilyn co-star Eddie Redmayne was also feted, taking home the Breakthrough Award, while Simon Pegg and Nick Frost were crowned the Comedians of the Year, and newsman Piers Morgan nabbed TV Personality of the Year.

Hugh Jackman is set to be honoured with the Golden Icon Award at the 2013 Zurich Film Festival and the Donostia Award at the San Sebastian Film Festival next month (Sep13). The X-Men star will receive the Global Icon Award at a ceremony on 28 September (13) and will also present his new film Prisoners in the Gala Premieres section of the Swiss festival.
A statement from Zurich Film Festival Director Karl Spoerri reads, "Hugh Jackman is in a class by himself as a multi-talented entertainer with a global following. There is nothing he can't do and he proves this time and time again with every project he's involved in. We're honoured to recognise his brilliant career at the Zurich Film Festival."
Past honourees include Sean Penn, Michael Douglas and Morgan Freeman.
Jackman will also be feted with the Basque festival's Donostia Award for lifetime achievement on 27 September (13), along with Spanish actress Carmen Maura, at the San Sebastian Film Festival.
Past recipients include Oliver Stone, Ewan McGregor, Tommy Lee Jones, John Travolta and Dustin Hoffman.