As yet another Perl monger meeting unfolded, I saw her sitting alone in the corner. I strolled over.

"Hi, are you here for the meeting?," I said.
"Yes, my name's Ruby," she replied, looking up at me with bright eyes.
"Haskell."
"So, how long have you been programming Perl?"
"As long as I can remember. I use nothing else." I smiled and sat down.
"Um, I am having trouble installing this PPM," she said, glancing down at her laptop.
"What's a PPM?"
"PPM files are Perl libraries."
"You mean, modules? I get those from CPAN."
"What's CPAN?" she asked.
"CPAN is this cool site created by Randy Kobes in Japan. It has all the Perl stuff you will ever need."
"Well, I get everything from ActiveState, the creators of Perl."
"You mean, O'Reilly. They're the ones in charge. Have you seen, Perl.com? It's the official homepage."
"Well. I never knew that."
"Perl's a big language. There's always something new to learn. Right now, I trying to figure out whether I should use Module::Build instead of make."
"You mean nmake."
"Same thing."
"Oh. I got nmake off of Microsoft's ftp site. It's nice to see Microsoft helping us out. But I never have a need for it, with PPM and everything. What's Module::Build?"
"It's a module for building and installing Perl modules, but I still like using MakeMaker. It seems that most people are using both these days."
"Neat. It's good to see the Perl community agreeing on another issue."
"Anyway, I remember hearing that the ActiveState repository is limited and often out-of-date. Have you ever used another repository like the one on PerlMonks run by PodMaster?"
"PodMaster?"
"Yeah, he's this nice guy, very helpful."
"PodMaster reminds me of the BeastMaster, this corny movie that the Turner channel always played on Sunday afternoons."
"Do you think Ted Turner has anything to do with Perl?"
"Who knows? But he also calls himself 'crazyinsomniac'."
"Who? Ted Turner?"
"No, PodMaster! And he has an account on Java Junkies. Speaking of Java, did you know that Java powers the Mars rover?"
"Those idiots! When will they see that using Perl is so much simpler!!"