Governor Cuomo Just Tried to Claim That the Subways Are Improving and We're Not Having It

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Have you ever noticed how some people are so funny? We're talking making jokes that leave our sides splitting and tummy's sore hours after.

Governor Andrew Cuomo made a good joke the other day about the current state of the NYC subway system. Wanna hear it?

On Tuesday, Cuomo stated, "I would venture to say if you were looking very carefully, you would see improvement already."

Oh, is that so? Improvements you say? See that's funny, because I looked real long and hard on Sunday while waiting for a C train that never came. Then I looked again after walking 20 minutes to the J. I also took up to some reflecting as I was sitting on that J, moving approximately an inch per hour.

What precisely is it we're supposed to be seeing here, Mr. Coo Coo for Cuomo Puffs?

Needless to say, the internet nearly broke (but not as bad as the subway) when we heard this good ole' knee slapper. People are up in armpits (literally, you have to jam yourself into these trains to get to work now) about the constant stream of maintenance and delays plaguing every subway line across the metro area.

This week was exceptionally horrible, with a rail cover breaking on the 1, 2, and 3 during rush hour Thursday and a power outage on Sunday, causing shutdowns and delays between Brooklyn.

Not to mention the lack of clear communication when s**t does it the fan.

MTA: "Due to *GARBLE GARBLE* train...get off at the *CRACKLE CRACKLE* then go to the *MUFFLE MUFFLE*..."

Also me: *plugs headphones back in and accepts fate that we're not getting anywhere in a hurry today*

MTA chairman Joe Lhota's $800 million plan to make a positive change to our lives released in July, with a few items currently being implemented. But the fact remains that things are taking a violent turn for the worst this year underground.

It would be one thing if one line was the source of our woes. But that's not the case. Recent MTA data reveals that only the L train has been running on-time more than 75% of the time.

75%?!

That's a solid C in our grade book. And that's the best of them. We've become accustomed to preparing a plan B, C, D, F, G, H..., all the way to Z plan for when our subways stop running, causing us to improvise just to get from point A to point B. Man, that's a lot of letters in that paragraph.

mtanyctransit Today, we reopened the reimagined 53 Street R Station in Sunset Park, Brooklyn. This is the first of 33 stations to undergo extensive renovations as part of Governor Cuomo’s initiative to create new and improved design standards for subway stations. In addition to enhanced lighting, countdown clocks, WiFi connectivity, and USB charging ports, new tile mosaics from artist Mickalene Thomas accent the station. @mtaartsdesign (Photos: M. Hermann / MTA NYCT.)

But keep looking, really. According to Gov. C-Money, there are some visible improvements to find in all this transportation hell. Hey, maybe if you squint your eyes for long enough you can see yourself getting to work on time for once! Isn't that nice?!