Saturday, December 27, 2014

Welcome

If you have found this site, you most likely have lost a baby or are losing one. I'm so very sorry. I hate that anyone would need the information on this site, but I pray that it is helpful to you.

I'm aware that quite a number of non-Orthodox people have accessed this site and found it helpful and that's good. It was never my intention to be exclusive about who is welcome here! Even if you don't share my faith, please do avail yourself of the rest of the site. The pages that are most specific to Orthodoxy are Prayers and Liturgics and the Touchstone article. The Actual Process is entirely medical in nature and the Photographs page is just that. In addition, while many of the stories are about Orthodox families, not all of them are. All of this is simply to say that you should be able to find what you need comfortably without feeling like I'm forcing my faith upon you.

This site is always going to be a work in progress as more parents add their stories and photographs. In addition I will add any relevant news items here on the main page under this post. If there is anything you think should be added here or any corrections you would like to make, again, feel free to email me.

May the most Holy Lady Theotokos, the Mother of God, comfort you in your grief, as she has comforted me in mine.

17 comments:

Thank you for creating such a sensitive, honest, and sane website about pregnancy loss. I have lost three pregnancies in the last 14 months, and your stories and photos have brought me a lot of comfort.

Other than losing a pregnancy we might not share much in common, but your kindness is transcendent and unifying.

Oh my heart aches terribly for you! I am so sorry to read about your loss! Wow. Words cannot express the comfort I wish I could give. I wish there was something I could do. You are so strong and I know the knowledge you have will be a comfort to you. You will be in my prayers.

I am a man and I stumbled across a miscarriage video on youtube and I felt a great compassion for the young woman who expressed her experience. I was unable to be at peace after seeing the video so I searched the internet to understand more and read other stories. I've heard of miscarriages many times before but only at surface value. Now that I am more aware of the physical, and emotional pain that women experience, I will be in prayer for all you brave women who endure such a loss. I will continue to be supportive and sensitive. Thank you for sharing this blog and opening up my eyes and my heart.

Anonymous, I am so touched that you (1) even watched a video about miscarriage and (2) searched around and found this site. Thank you for letting me know. This has not been an easy site to work on and it helps keep me going when I read comments like yours.

I am in the process of miscarrying... I found out day before yesterday that my baby died 4 weeks ago. I haven't started spotting. I am not really cramping, either. I have opted for a natural miscarriage and have taken some Cohosh to help the process along since Teeny passed 4 weeks ago at 10 weeks. I am really horribly sad. My husband left for a special school yesterday morning, so I am all alone right now. If you have any thoughts or advice on how to get through this, that would be incredible. Thanks a bunch.

Thank you for your website, thank you for helping me cope. I am miscarrying now, I am 11 weeks, but I found out yesterday he stopped growing at 7 weeks. No heartbeat. I am thankful for the stories and most of all for the photos. God is good in ALL things, I find comfort in the book of Job- God gives and takes away, but still I will praise Him. My heart goes out to each family that goes through this loss. Again, thank you.

I lost my baby girl on October 25th 1986. On October 25th 2003 my first grandchild was born. I wept as I had every year since my baby Laura left me, but there was a tiny four pound little boy in my arms that God had given us. I cried again.

I just lost my baby today, at 5 weeks. I too am confused, and your questions to God intrigue me to ask them of Him myself. Yet, I do not because it is not for us to understand, only to lean on Him and trust Him. The gown and blanket you made were exquisite, showing great love in their stitches. Maybe I will borrow the idea of the ornaments...that way, the world may know that although I didn't have a physical baby on the outside, I was in fact 100% pregnant with a precious baby that we've waited five long years for. God bless you and than you for sharing your personal journey. So glad God led me to your page <3

This blog gave me immense comfort when I needed it the most. Every single one of these stories from all of these brave women and families showed me that I'm not alone in my pain and grief. The photos gave me an amazing reference for what to look for when my own miscarriage occurred, which led to my being able to say goodbye in the way I felt best for me.I always felt welcome despite creed or lifestyle differences. Thank you for your open hearts and minds. Your faith is lovely. My blog about my pregnancy loss, however there is strong language some might not find suitable or be comfortable with reading.

Thank you for visiting. If you have a comment or question you are not comfortable leaving in a comment box, then feel free to e-mail me directly. We appreciate the opinions of others, but would remind you to present them with Christian charity.

The Lament of Rachel

Thus says the LORD: “A voice is heard in Ramah, lamentation and bitter weeping. Rachel is weeping for her children; she refuses to be comforted for her children, because they are no more.” -Jeremiah 31:15

The title?

In 2011 my son, my sixth child, died at just under 13 weeks gestation and was born about three weeks later. We found out he had died on the Feast of St. Innocent (March 31). He had been due about the date of the second feast of St. Innocent (October 6). As it turned out, we buried him on the first old calendar feast of St. Innocent (April 13). It should be no wonder that we named him Innocent. And really, all of our lost babies are little innocents. Previously I had never had any problems in pregnancy so with his death I also experienced a loss of innocence. Since then, we have lost three more babies: another son at 13 weeks, a third baby at 11 weeks and a fourth at 6 weeks. "It can't happen to me" became "It happened to me".

Purpose of this blog

When I was facing a miscarriage last year, I realized quickly that the information available online was incomplete. Sending out a plea via my blog, I gratefully received a tremendous amount of practical information and encouragement. I decided I wanted to make that information available to others in a safe format. In addition, by providing it I wanted to encourage women to deliver their babies as naturally as possible. I am an Orthodox Christian matushka so this site will be from an Orthodox perspective although all are welcome. If you have questions, comments or ideas to improve this site, you may contact me at lostinnocentsorthodox@gmail.com.

Important medical disclaimer:

This should not constitute medical advice. My background is 13 years of nursing including gynecology, but I am NOT a doctor. Be sensible and if you find yourself in a situation that worries you please call your doctor or midwife. If you have a life-threatening situation or one that will become life-threatening, please call 911. However badly you may feel, your life is important and you should not deny yourself care.