topiary cats

Friday, May 20, 2005

Very unfortunately, and to my great dismay, I have zero urge to paint these days. I do wish it weren't so, but I actually have a borderline physical reaction even thinking about it. I'm now in my 10th week of pregnancy. and I'm praying that all this weirdness passes very, very soon. i'm so out of whack and have no creative energy...oh well I guess I do but it's being directed somewhere else...

I'm not even getting artistically excited over the things that generally put a fire under me to run to the easel. I've long since given up on getting that wedding portrait done for next month; I only have 2 glaze layers done...but I know my friend will understand.

Honestly, this is the first time in my life that I can remember "reaching" for my inner artistic wellspring and that energy isn't there. It's really a very strange (and a bit unpleasant) feeling. A few months ago I was talking to my husband about how I almost...rely...on that wellspring and ability to be there...like a constant part of myself that I can always count on. So I am feeling very odd and eagerly awaiting its return. It's ironic, because I always thought this time would be a creative high.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

i've been on a Soup Quest lately. The soup place across from my office has some fantastic soup. especially their asparagus crab bisque, but they are so fiendishly expensive!!! So I have been exploring other options.

The empanada place claimed to have black bean soup with no meat in it. That sounded promising. Except that it solely consisted of a cup of black beans- with maybe an inch of liquid on top. Nothing else- no celery, no potatoes...hey, I've had bean soup before, and this was just a cup of beans. I couldn't eat it.

So then, because I was really hungry, I went down to the Seaport to get whatever looked edible. I was thinking about a nice calzone, but then I remembered the Japanese place there, which has really yummy shrimp udon.

I think the place changed ownership, because that certainly wasn't the shrimp udon I know and love.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Well it seems that I can, in fact, post here at work despite the all-blocking firewall.

This weekend was so crazy busy...Saturday was janae's wedding party, which she did a fabulous job with. Then on Sunday Deon and I were in the AIDS walk, which was pleasant, though tiring. No power-naps for us, though...we had to head into Brooklyn for a birthday/moving to Miami party for Mark. I'm really going to miss them.

This morning we had an interview with the owner of the apartment we're trying to get. I can't take the Bronx anymore, especially being pregnant. Even Deon can't stand it, which is really saying something since he's happy just about anywhere. I'm tired of calling in noise complaints at 12:30. I'm sick of the neighbor's late night parties. I'm sick of the filth in the building- people peeing in the elevator, that cigarette smell from thepeople below us that makes me throw up, crude graffiti......our apartment is so awesome, but the neighborhood and building are such crap. there is a reason we are paying ridiculously low rent for the apartment we have.

Revently in my pregnancy I have developed what I call Sanitation Radar.

Friday, May 13, 2005

So despite my ex-mentality to never journal online, here I am. Since I got pregnant, I have been shamelessly voyeuristic- reading other womens' pregnancy journals. I figured I might as well lay myself out there too.