Is Facebook Lying to Me?

Here I am, a blogger, telling I-don’t-know-who about my life. Entrusting you, dear readers, with a glimpse into my home, my psyche, sliming you with my drivel.

Really, I am a shy person and it is only the semi-closeted, confessional set up of the blog that allows me to share so freely with so many. If you were all here in my living room I’d be much more twitchy and uncomfortable trying to interact with you.

Shy = diffident, uneasy in company.

In person it’s difficult to feel comfortable on the “me” train. I am loathe to force myself on people. I’d rather listen, soak up the personalities around me, learn something about the people in the room.

Being in a group brings out the comedian in me. I’ll say funny things every now and then to break the intensity of feeling the vibes of multiple souls in close proximity.

I’m worried about Facebook because I think it lies. When I get those messages that tell me ____ wants to be my friend I doubt that Facebook is being real. Did ___ actually make this request? Do they really, really want to be my friend? I’ve barely heard of them.

I think Facebook has a friend generator that keeps track of who comments on who’s status and if the two aren’t friends they automatically try to hook you up. This seems like a good idea to increase comraderie but it makes me feel embarassed.

Does ____ have any idea that Facebook is offering this frendship on his/her behalf? What if ____ has no desire to be my friend and I, unknowingly, click the bar that “friends” us and it shows up on ____’s page and they think WTF? Who the hell is CDillon?

It might be that I fear rejection but it’s really that I hate to get in somebody’s face. I’m fine if I know you well but, dude, that is the hard part. That’s why I need friends with some Aquarius in their charts.

Frank Miller (my husband not the bad guy in High Noon) has Aquarius Rising. Aquarians are the type to slap an arm around the shoulder of a perfect stranger and say, “Hey buddy, how you doing? Let’s hang out.” In fact when I think about the history of my social life there was always an Aquarius there doing the hard stuff and I just fell in with their friends. There were lots of them – my absent, hoodlum father, Alice Marquez, George Cox, Patti Ramelli, Steve Durkee, Michael Bishop, Chad Allen ( a Pisces w Aquarius). Bless them.

I do my work and I dream, that eventually, I will know people through an organic process, like a vine weaving it’s tendrils out among those who are in the neighborhood of my creative work.

Meanwhile, the Aquarians around me, with their non-judgemental inclusiveness, sweep new souls into the friendship net. Does that mean Facebook has Aquarius in it’s chart?