Madonna night at TIFF

She looked f-cking amazing. It’s a Tom Ford dress. She’s compact, little, tight, healthy. The makeup, the hair, even the face... in person it was really, really good. So good that she’s Sasha’s look of the day today on etalk. Sasha also pointed out though that she only posed with her hands at her sides. Am too foggy today to analyse why that might be. Help?

So this is Madonna at the TIFF gala premiere of W.E. last night. Now here’s the deal with the face - I remember seeing her last year at a party during Oscar week and writing that when you look at it live, it’s actually not as scary as it seems in photographs. Click here for that article. Everyone who saw her said the same thing last night. They all called her “beautiful”. I mean, yeah, she’s had work done, and she’s Botoxed all she can out of what she can get to but there are still lines and when right in front of you moving around and sh-t, it’s really not so jacked. Laura was on the carpet producing our live show last night and was with her for several minutes. If you’ve been reading my blog long enough, you know my friend Laura, um, doesn’t hold back with the bitch. And even Laura, who was eyeballing it up close, said that it’s really, really quite good.

We were talking about this as I was getting my makeup done this morning. And that was the question - if it’s not bad in person, why is it so f-cked up when it’s shot? Jade, the make-up artist, said that that’s what happens in two dimension. With all that filler and all those injections, it ends up just flattening everything out, which is why it ends up looking so weird, even if it looks totally fine with the natural eye.

So that’s the choice you make then. You let it age on its own and the wrinkles gradually happen, your face sagging slowly, death approaching, or you fight it with all the cosmetic procedures available and risk looking like you’re walking around with a stun gun up in your forehead all the time.

Anyway, Madonna was all game on the carpet. Totally on. Backstage though earlier in the day at her presser, it was apparently a different story. The Globe & Mail is reporting that she made 8 volunteers turn their backs and face the wall when she was walking down the hall. You don’t actually expect her to move around the Lightbox like a normal person, do you?

I wish though that we could probe a little more into the article, specifically who actually made the request for those volunteers to turn around. Was it an eager beaver handler taking it upon herself/himself to please Madonna? Or did the order actually come from Madonna’s people? Sometimes the people who work for celebrities are bigger dicks than the celebrities themselves although, still, if you’re working with dicks, that’s obviously a problem that will ultimately always reflect back on to you.