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Wednesday’s Zing!

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Now we know why Big Al was in that picture with Willie Meggs. Free publicity never hurts.

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During a hastily called news conference at the airport, Al Lawson announced Tuesday that he was heading to the North Pole, where he intended to apply for the job of Santa Claus 2014.

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All I want for Christmas … is to see my Zing! published and to never hear or see anything else about any Kardashians or Miley Cyrus. Merry Christmas!

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In every family holiday gathering there is one weird relative. If you’re unaware of who it is, it’s likely you.

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Soon Florida will have as many holiday displays at the Capitol as we have specialty license plates.

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Phil Robertson obviously does not care if he does the show or not. Who did A&E think watched country folks killing ducks?

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By Ira’s logic, sustained contribution, AJ McCarron should have won the Heisman Trophy.

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A huge holiday thank you to the gentleman who chased us down for three blocks to return the $200 we accidentally left in the ATM! We paid it forward tenfold to Christmas Connection.

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Wow. I wonder if Joseph Smith and Brigham Young just did a 180.

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Wrong, Bob, the framers would have never used the phrase “separation of state and religion.”

Zing! thinks somebody needs to read Thomas Jefferson’s Letter to the Danbury Baptists. Email zing@tallahassee.com or write P.O. Box 990, Tallahassee, FL 32302. And be sure to check out the Zing! blog at Tallahassee.com or on Twitter at @zinginbox.