Creepy Pastor Bans Women From Wearing Underwear In Church So They Can Be 'Closer To God'

In News Which Could Almost Certainly Be A Plot In True Detective, a reverend in Nairobi, Kenya has forbidden all female members of his congregation from wearing underwear during services. Reverend Njohi of the Lord’s Propeller Redemption Church states that women need to be undergarment-free so they can be “closer to God.” NOPE, NOTHING WEIRD ABOUT THAT. The Metro UK writes:

Njohi reportedly said worshippers needed to feel free in their ‘mind and body’ when attending, but strangely did not say men needed to leave their pants at home as well.

The pastor added there would be grave consequences if his female members did not adhere to the new rule, which was reportedly adhered to as most women are said to have attended the next service with no underwear.

Of course, men don’t have to leave themselves exposed to be sexually violated by the holy spirit because they’re already totally down with His Holy Majesty. The Kenyan Post, which originally broke this story, also says that mothers are advised to check their daughters to make sure they’re not wearing underwear so, they too, can “receive Christ” and this story officially just got legit messed up. I hate to say this, but when your church is asking you to leave your daughter’s private parts exposed to Jesus, maybe Xenu isn’t looking so bad. “Scientology: You Can Totally Keep Your Underwear On!”