The Jesus Cow: A Novel

Summary

New York Times bestselling humorist Michael Perry makes his fiction debut with this hilarious and big-hearted tale, a comic yet sincere exploration of faith and the foibles of modern life that blends the barbed charm of Garrison Keillor, the irreverent humor of Christopher Moore, and the audacious insight of Chuck Klosterman.

Life is suddenly full of drama for low-key Harley Jackson: A woman in a big red pickup has stolen his bachelor's heart, a Hummer-driving predatory developer is threatening to pave the last vestiges of his family farm, and inside his barn is a calf bearing the image of Jesus Christ. His best friend, Billy, a giant of a man who shares his trailer house with a herd of cats and tries to pass off country music lyrics as philosophy, urges him to avoid the woman, fight the developer, and get rich off the calf. But Harley takes the opposite tack, hoping to avoid what his devout, dearly departed mother would have called "a scene."

Then the secret gets out-right through the barn door, and Harley's "miracle" goes viral. Within hours pilgrims, grifters, and the media have descended on his quiet patch of Swivel, Wisconsin, looking for a glimpse (and a percentage) of the calf. Does Harley hide the famous, possibly holy calf and risk a riot, or give the people what they want-and raise enough money to keep his land-and, just possibly, win the woman and her big red pickup truck?

Harley goes all in, cutting a deal with a major Hollywood agent that transforms his little farm into an international spiritual theme park-think Lourdes, only with cheese curds and t-shirts. Soon, Harley has lots of money . . . and more trouble than he ever dreamed.

Reviews

The four-lane road bypasses small town Swivel, Wisconsin, relegating it to exist in the shadow of urban development. Only occasional drivers exit the interstate, usually to fill up at the Kwik Pump, and the town’s population is dwindling. Swivel is not exactly a destination spot.But all that is about to change; Harley Jackson’s Christmas Eve-born bull calf came into the world bearing an image of Jesus Christ on his flank. And the news of the amazing calf is about to go viral.This quirky, lough-out-loud tale of small towns with their political drama, environmental issues, and scandal, amid farming and tales of love will leave readers chuckling over the rural philosophies and the undeniable charm of small town America. And once the laughter subsides, readers will find that the author, in the midst of the tale, offers an insightful commentary on life.Recommended.

Book on CD read by the author.Adapted from the book jacket: Life is suddenly full of drama for Harley Jackson: A woman in a big red pickup has stolen his bachelor’s heart; a Hummer-driving developer hooked on self-improvement audiobooks is threatening to pave [over] his family farm; and inside his barn lies a calf bearing the image of Jesus Christ. Harley’s best friend, Billy, who tries to pass of country music lyrics as philosophy, urges him to sidestep the woman, fight the developer, and get rich off the calf. But Harley takes the opposite tack, hoping to avoid what his devout, dearly departed mother would have called “a scene.”My ReactionsI love Michael Perry. His nonfiction musings on life in small-town Wisconsin are poignant, funny, philosophical, and relatable. Now he turns to fiction, with a tale of one man’s struggle to make sense of his life and rekindle his faith. Perry has a gift for describing people and situations; he makes the ridiculous totally believable. I am reminded of Carl Hiaasen, but with more heart. There are a few scenarios that really stretch credulity here, but on the whole even the outlandish seems like it could actually happen: crowds of pilgrims inspired by social media, in-fighting among the residents over who gets a piece of the pie, one man’s efforts to stay above the fray, another’s desire to profit. My only real complaint is that the ending scenario was just too farfetched; it seemed that he lost his way and took the first exit. Still, I enjoyed the novel and we all need a little light entertainment now and again (not to mention a belly laugh or two). Perry read the audio version himself. He has a great delivery. I can’t imagine anyone else doing a better job.

Wow! This was a strange book, but not in a bad way. The book was funny and very different.We’ve all seen or heard about the piece of toast with the image of Jesus, right? Well, Harley Jackson’s cow, who he named Tina Turner, delivers a calf who has a birthmark that looks like Jesus. You can only imagine the uproar that causes for not only for Harley but the whole town. Swivel, Wisconsin. is overrun by the media and everyone within hearing distance of the calf and the birthmark.The characters were a mix of…well, characters. Some are a bit strange and those were the ones I loved the most. There is a lot happening in this book, and it had a steady flow. I really liked Harley, Caroline and Billy, but also some of the people who came and went throughout the book. The ending wasn’t what I expected, but it worked.This was my first Perry book, but I do plan to read more. It was a quick, fun read that takes place in a small town, a well written story that is very original.

“Well, said Harley, “that's trouble.”This book got off to a great start, with a cow (actually a bull calf) born in a manager (well, really a barn) on Christmas eve. The calf had the unfortunate birthmark of a hide with the face of Christ, right there in black and white.The characters were quirky and odd and altogether interesting, and I really enjoyed the first third or so of the book. And there were some wryly funny bits, too. Then it went downhill for me.I didn't like the cavalier attitude towards the animals sold at stockyard auctions, but I can deal with that. And “...by calling the vet was able to intervene in time to keep the animal on track for the abattoir, ultimately a zero-sum proposition for the steer.” I hated, hated, hated what happened to The Jesus Cow and Tina Turner towards the end of the book.There was a little sweet romance, and some good ol' Scandinavian/WI farmers and a greedy real estate developer. So much potential.But after I great start, I was just vaguely bored. Some parts (thinking especially of the environmentalist Carolyn) were predictable, even if I didn't predict the complete details.All in all, not a bad book but not especially memorable, either.

I have loved all of Perry's nonfiction work, so I came along to this book, his first novel. It was very funny, but not completely satisfying. Yet, this was one very funny book and could make a great movie with all of its highly visual scenes.

discovered Michael Perry quite a few years ago now when his wonderful memoir Population 485 came out and captivated me with its quiet paean to life in small town rural Wisconsin. Since then I've read just about everything he's written, enjoying my return trips into Perry's life, community, and acquaintances. With The Jesus Cow, Perry makes his first foray into fiction and he brings the same simple, intelligent, and homespun narration to this novel that he has employed to such good use in his non-fiction. His characters could just as easily be his neighbors as his fictional creations and that is half the charm of this book. Harley Jackson is a quiet man. He works at a factory and continues to run beef cattle on the small portion of the family farm still left to him. When his dairy cow, Tina Turner, gives birth to a calf on Christmas Eve, he is startled and dismayed to see a clear picture of Jesus on the calf's side. Some people would consider this a miracle and trumpet it to all and sundry. Harley, on the other hand, is completely dismayed and tries to decide how to camouflage the inconvenient marking, from confining the calf to the barn to rubbing shoe polish over Jesus' face to try and make it less visible at least and invisible at best. It doesn't even occur to him to try and capitalize on the image, even though his best friend Billy suggests that cashing in would solve many of Harley's financial troubles, one of which is that local real estate developer, Klute Sorenson, has it out for him, wanting to get his hands on remaining 15 acres of Harley's farm and already owning the rest of the original is using the town's generally unenforced statutes to try and force Harley out. Preferring to avoid confrontation, Harley can and does put his head in the sand about the likely outcome of Klute's bullying and about the cow's miraculous mark until he has no choice but to face both situations. When Harley falls head over heels for a woman new to town, inviting her into his life, and then the calf escapes the barn and is spotted by the devout mail carrier, who promptly uploads a photo of the Jesus on its hide to the internet, life as Harley and the rest of the small town knows it explodes wide open. On the surface, Perry has written an entertaining and folksy tale about the three ring circus media storm that results when Hollywood and rural Wisconsin collide but on a deeper level, he has penned an examination of the challenges facing small farming communities--development versus conservation, poverty, lack of funding for vital services, outsiders versus locals, and what success looks like among other issues. Harley is a lovely character, plain spoken and honest, not given to anything showy or unconsidered. The large cast of unusual secondary characters around him, best friend Billy who lives in a trailer on Harley's land, local junk yard owner Maggie, disgraced former academic and stubborn environmentalist Carolyn, developer and avid listener to cliched self-help business books Klute, his welder-artist girlfriend Mindy, and slick Hollywood agent Sloan are all fantastic and well developed and all are vital to the story in their own ways. As in his memoirs, Perry draws an appealing picture of place and the connections that people feel to it. His questions about faith, which weave through the whole of the story, are respectful and balanced as he shows both the sensational and vocal faith of many of the pilgrims clamoring to see the calf as well as the quiet, modest, and unpretentious faith of people in the community. And his very Midwestern sense of dry humor shines through in both small moments and the over the top ridiculous ones as well. The novel is well-paced, off-beat, and happily engrossing and those who have enjoyed his memoirs will appreciate the straightforward and entertaining way in which he has tackled his first work of fiction as well.

ON WISCONSIN! I&#039;m finding it difficult to write a review for this book. I have put it off for a while to straighten it out it my mind. Just how do I express the level of enjoyment it gave me? I just don&#039;t have the ability to put it into writing. So I&#039;ll just have to say.....home run! I won&#039;t go into detail on the plot to avoid ruining it for you, but the basic synopsis is that a small town farmer is blessed(cursed) with a newborn calf that has the face of Jesus on it&#039;s side. The ensuing story is hilarious and somewhat shocking. The ending is touching. Michael Perry has managed to portray the Central Wisconsin life exactly as it is. I am from there myself, and despite being removed from God&#039;s country for the past 30 years, it brought me home like it was yesterday. I have read some of the other reviews people have posted, where they wonder if the characters are too stereotypical or are supposed to be a social commentary. My opinion is that the characters portrayals are somewhat a commentary on today&#039;s world, but also that they accurately represent small town Wisconsin. After a career that allowed me to work in 17 different states, I have seen all types of regional differences in people&#039;s personalities, and that this is how people actually are in Wisconsin. For the most part, they are genuine, somewhat reserved, and very caring. Perry catches all of this exceptionally well. One of my favorite parts was when one of the characters is trying to figure out why a person prays: &quot;So how do you tell?&quot; &quot;How do I tell what?&quot; &quot;When you get the answer to your prayer? You hear a voice? You get a feeling? Holy text message?&quot; &quot;Oh, I don&#039;t know. I&#039;m not sure you do get an answer. The Lord has more important things to do than advise me on land deals.&quot; &quot;And yet you pray.&quot; &quot;It helps to settle my mind. To sort my mind&quot;. Isn&#039;t that it? It helps to settle our minds. To sort things out. To me, it really hit home. Perry is an unassuming man, a humorist, a philosopher, an outstanding observer of people, and a great writer. This is his first venture into adult fiction (he has a YA novel under his belt). His other works have been non-fiction, auto-biographical, and fantastic character studies. I encourage you to try &quot;Coop, A Year Of Poultry, Pigs, and Parenting&quot;, and challenge you to come away without having some tears of joy and feeling good about yourself. If you want to get an idea of Perry&#039;s humor, there is a Utube video of his entitled &quot;Michael Perry on Wisconsin 101&quot;. It gives you an idea of what his writing will be like. (And for his humor, watch &quot;Farmer Snort&quot;).I cannot recommend this book enough. Perry is one of my favorite living authors. You will not be sorry!