A Margate granddad has spoken of the heartbreaking and harsh reality of living with dementia

David Woodger won the Inspirational Person Award from charity Age UK Thanet earlier this month (Image: Brian Green)

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The classes are held at Age UK with a doctor and two nurses from Elmstone, Thanet Mental Health Unit visiting them once a month for additional support.

He said: “I sit down and speak to people who look after those with dementia and explain what is going to happen. They are the ones who need to understand the condition the most. It’s a very hard job.”

“I speak to a 93-year-old man and I hold his hand. His wife calls me an angel for the way I treat him. He looks forward to coming in every week. By helping others it’s helping me.”

Fighting it

He added: “I do silly little things but I am fighting it everyday.

“My biggest fear is that one day I may forget my wife’s name and the names of my children and grandchildren.

“I go around to shops and talk to them about dementia. I leave a sign they can put up on their windows. I tell them if people start stuttering, to tell them they understand what it is, which can go a long way to supporting people with dementia.”

His life

David Woodger and his wife Pamela on their wedding day, 25 years ago

Mr Woodger learned he was an adopted child when he was 12, an episode that caused him to “go to pieces” and suffer a nervous breakdown.

After getting to grips with the truth, he joined the Royal Navy later working for a security firm as an area supervisor.

Mr Woodger married his first wife Monica in 1934, but sadly, she died of cancer aged just 41.

It was when he was working night shifts at Safeway a few years later that he met his second wife Pamela, a marriage that has lasted 25 years.

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He said: "It was love at first sight. We never argue. I am 83 and she is only 61 but it worked for us. She’s just the right woman for me. She is kind to me, we agree on things we talk to each other all the time.

"But I do still think of my first wife and still have a tattoo of her on my arm. Cancer is a terrible thing.”

Mr Woodger's pointers for helping people with dementia

Speaking about some ways people can help those with dementia, he said:

1. Take them on walks. “They will recognise the little things – the trees, wildlife and animals. It helps them remember things.

2. Speak to them in person rather than on the phone. People with dementia can get all worked up on the phone. They can hear the person but sometimes can’t understand them. So try and speak slowly and they will understand you better.

3. Talk about the old days, they will recognise things from earlier on in their lives

4. Hold their hand when you speak to them. They can feel the warmth and that helps too.