C-Mart Closing but Holding Massive Liquidation Sale

Yup, you read that right: The local outpost of super-duper shopping warehouse C-Mart is closing. But read on for details about a massive liquidation sale.

A news update on the Landover store’s Web site states it as follows:

“This is not a hoax or a gimmick. The rumors you have been hearing our [sic] true. We’re CLOSING our LANDOVER STORE in preparation for our biggest project EVER . . . ONLINE SHOPPING AT CMART.COM Coming 4/28!! (that’s right . . . NEXT MONTH!)

“MAJOR retailers have been closing their doors due to a weak economy or diminishing sales, BUT, our motive is the exact opposite.

“Over the past eight months, C-Mart has undergone substantial upgrades and modernizations under the direction of its new co-owners, Brad and Dan. During the 2007 acquisition, Bondroff and Shuman were relatively vocal of their intent to not only make the C-Mart buying process more efficient and enhance customer service but to undoubtedly expand the reach of the C-Mart brand to a national level. In order to carry out this goal it was obvious that C-Mart WAS GOING TO NEED TO ESTABLISH ITSELF AS AN E-COMMERCE RETAILER!”

Despite the excessive use of capital letters and exclamation points, this seemingly disappointing news actually has an upside: Because it’s closing, C-Mart will hold a massive liquidation sale starting Friday, March 28, at 8 AM. And we have to admit, it’s a pretty great sale: Everything is 50 percent off the lowest ticketed price (which is usually already pretty darn low).

So this may be an occasion to call in sick to work, polish off the credit cards, and get yourself out to C-Mart before it’s gone forever.