To see a band that has meant absolutely everything to you for the past 15 years is enough to make you cry. To hear them play songs that truly helped you through the hardest part of your life, well, that’s almost too much to handle.

I remember staying up late on the weekends to watch All Things Rock (a show hosted by Benji and Joel Madden where they would play music videos from alternative bands). I would tape them (yes, on a VHS tape) and watch them over and over again. I remember buying every single magazine on the shelf at the drugstore up the street and then cutting out every picture and mention of Good Charlotte I found just to staple them into the walls of my bedroom. I obsessed over the members of the band and their music. They felt more like friends than superstars even though I had never met them.

I grew up and immersed myself in a world of music. I’ve fallen in and out love with bands for the past fifteen years but Good Charlotte has always been a constant. I’ve become great friends with some super great musicians over the years in real life but something about Good Charlotte still makes me feel like I know them. Like we have been friends forever, we just don’t talk much. I know that sounds crazy, but what’s crazier (at least to me) are the people that don’t feel a connection to music and the musicians that play it.

Good Charlotte played mostly old songs last night. They played the songs that were on repeat through my teenage years. The songs that my friends and I would blare in our parents’ cars when they would take us to concerts. The songs that I would cry to when I was having a bad day and the songs that kept me living when I truly wanted to take my own life. Hearing and seeing those songs live last night meant absolutely everything to me.

The second they took the stage, I started screaming. There I was, just feet away from guys that can be credited with saving my life. There I was waiting for that music to hit me and for me to feel what I witnessed kids feeling at the Yellowcard show the night before. With that first note, I felt it. I felt everything. I felt the wave of emotions hit me right in the gut and I wanted to fall over.

I think I went numb for the rest of the show. Maybe numb isn’t the right word but my heart and head were so overloaded that I truly lost myself. I was too busy screaming every single word to every single song to notice that there was sweat dripping down my back. I had forgotten to put my earplugs in but didn’t realize that until I left the show and couldn’t hear in my left ear. I completely forgot about the fact that I was going on no more than 3 hours of sleep and I was beyond exhausted. I was truly lost in the moment and I didn’t care.

Good Charlotte played damn near every song I wanted them to play but it just wasn’t enough. They left the stage after playing “Lifestyles of the Rich & the Famous” and I felt one leftover tear rolling down my cheek. It was done. My time of feeling completely lost was over. I reluctantly walked towards the door to leave. As I stepped outside, my life turned back into exhaustion, stress about rent, stress about where I’m at in my life and everything else.

I saw Good Charlotte last night. I saw the band that saved my life. You can’t put that feeling into words. You just can’t.