Tag: Do-do

Researchers in Belgrade have been spending their days throwing faeces out of drones. In a recent release, the team has revealed their preliminary findings pertaining to one’s diet and the aerodynamics of poo.

Says Yuri Asmorov, “You’d be surprised the amount of defecation that is released from flying vehicles every year. Some of the more solid masses can reach a high velocity and may even cause destruction. Others, the more loosely held stools that is, are dispersed readily, which we fear may contribute to the spread of faeces-borne diseases.”

He goes on to cite the recent outbreak of dysentery caused by a particular strain of protozoa that was shown to be only available inside the gut of humans.

“The only way that strain could have covered such a large area is if it (the faeces carrying the protozoa) was blown into a kind of aerosol. Looking at the flight pattern of the aircraft, we can see that it’s very close to the official path of many jetliners.”

The team is now divided into groups, each eating a particular diet known to affect the style, substance and consistency of faeces. Each member’s sample is collected and sent up in a drone to various heights, and the final speed, scattering, area-coverage and ‘splat’ is recorded by high-speed cameras.

“The vertical drop test is already showing promise. We need to step it up and try various combinations of speed, wind, humidity and the like. We are considering using a wind-tunnel to facilitate this, but so far we have not been able to convince an operator to let us use one.”

Yuri and his crew will continue the tests and present their full findings next year.

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