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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Confession: I only thought I was cut out for Derby.

I thought I would forgo What I Wore Wednesday and give you a little insight on me – you know my favorite topic. I thought it was time to give you some real – not like my other posts aren’t (really I am this happy some days) – real me stuff.

This morning I received an email. Actually, it was stuck in my spam, but when I saw the subject line so many feelings from last year came rushing back – “Tryout Tonight!” It was from the Dallas Derby Devils. All of sudden I felt the embarrassment and paid all over again.

You see…I once thought I was cut out for Roller Derby. I was a fast skater, I hardly ever never fell and I was a tough girl. “I can do that” I thought…I THOUGHT! I had a small stint with the ref team for DDD, but a year later I was ready to actually get in there and be on a team. I had seen the girls skate, I had seen the bouts and knew the game, but that in no way prepared me for what I was going to experience.

I have to admit I was cocky when I walked into Mid-Cities Skateland- the smell brought me back to Junior High when I would spend hours lapping around that exact rink. I had my black with hot pink wheeled skates (shown below in video) ready. I was all set…

Well…can we just say without going to all the details that a year later I am not a part of Derby – oh that sounds bad, like they did something to me and they didn’t – I did it all to myself.

Let’s say – I got my butt kicked. I left with my tail between my legs on the second night and didn’t look back. I had visions of me in my sixties not being able to get out of my chair due to my roller derby injuries. I skate well, but not well enough and I had issues purposely throwing myself on the floor in practice. I left the rink that night in tears I remember calling either Nicole or my mother just crying and saying “I can’t do it – I completely suck at this”. Here I thought I was a good skater, but that meant nothing in this competition – you have to be tough along with being physically and mentally strong – which at the time I was neither.

To make me feel even worse about not making it or following through to make it – this video was posted on the internet.

Meh! Yeap…when you watch it that is me busting my booty in a beautiful split fall 26 seconds into the video. (You can catch me again at 1:37 minutes – those are my snazzy – paid too much for skates and again at 1:48 skating.) I was so embarrassed – until today I have only shared this video with one person. I felt like it was time to get it out there and say…

I only Thought I was Cut out for Derby.

Little tear of embarrassment inserted here.

I am not sure if I would go for it again and actually go all the way through try-out – probably not – I would rather do something a little less painful. I do though suggest it to anyone who is thinking about this sport – GO FOR IT! It is awesome and the women are wonderful. Practice skating, but also practice falling – oh and listen when they say get a good mouth piece because it is so uncomfortable to do everything else and have a sucky mouth piece bugging you.

Anyway – a year later I can say I can count on one hand how many times I have been back on those skates, but they will make the trip to JAG’s house and I will probably keep them always – not to mean anything, but because they are cute and spent too much money on them.