P.G. Wodehouse and Us

“Remember the scene at the beginnning of The Dog Who Knew Too Much?” Admin says. “Where Bernie addresses the Great Western Private Eye Association?”

“I do, as it happens,” says Spence.

“When you wrote that, did you have in mind Gussie Fink-Nottle’s speech at the Market Snodsbury Grammar School awards day ceremony from Right Ho, Jeeves?”

“Depends what you mean by have in mind. I don’t think you can write that sort of scene without being aware of the Wodehouse version. But there are many differences, starting with the point of view, of course.”

“How about a bit of Bernie, from the opening of The Dog Who Knew Too Much? Maybe as he’s wrapping up:”

Bernie shuffled through the papers. “And I guess that more or less … brings us to the end of the prepared remarks.” What was the word for when humans talk but you can’t understand a thing? Muttering? Yeah. Bernie was muttering now. “Happy to take any questions,” he went on, or something like that.

There were no questions.

“Well, then, it’s time to, uh … thanks. Yeah. Thanks. You’ve been a great, um.” Bernie raised his hand in a funny sort of wave, a page or two flying free, and started walking off the stage. Then came the applause. I heard it for sure, but my sense of hearing’s probably better than yours, no offense.

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Quinn!…Wodehouse!…Abrahams!…Rosenfelt!…Alexander McCall Smith!..wheeze!…There is not enough time in my day to read even some of the great authors…grump!…Although, the Scottish guy is going to be here in October signing all my books…snort!

Wolfie!…Nope!…snort!…Plus, to make her even madder than a hatter they did not return her phone call which she made around 6:30 last night telling them she would be “turning on the sprinkler system this weekend” come hell or high water…grump!…She pretty much was fuming all night long. With no ball playing, no walking, because she didn’t want to miss them, no baseball to watch, it was a pretty grumpy evening…grumble!

Rio, That is extremely rude of the renters. They could have at least called.

Did anyone see the crazy tanning woman on t v, who was accused of taking her child to a tanning salon? That woman is strange. Does she think she looks attractive? Not to mention the skin cancer and premature aging issues.

Poor Bernie! His speech was not exactly the success he had planned.
Public speaking ranks up top with things folks are most fearful of doing.
Wolfie: Sounds like a fun 10 day your mom and friend have planned. It will do her worlds of good to get away, relax and enjoy.

Rose & Barb: Folks are getting crazier and crazier. We can’t stand to read most news stories these days.

Public speaking!
I become a very fast talker when speaking publicly, hoping the torture will end sooner.
Staff: I can now read (most of) the captions when I click on the Friends of Chet to enlarge them. Check it out.
Rio: I am going to sell an Alexander McCall Smith book at the MMS, that is, if I can get Staff to take a picture of it for me. I wonder if you will be able to get a peek under his kilt! WhoooHooo! Oh…sorry. Inappropriate!

Wowzer! The blog is working at the speed of light! It is a pleasure to post. M.Baker has done some of his best work to date.
Rio: Those renters are just plain rude…not showing up after saying they would “like to have a chat”…leaving your friend to wait and wonder.
Dawson: Going to check out the captions.

Maskers!…I think it is the wondering what they wanted to chat about that pissed her off the most…heh!…Now she doesn’t give a rip about what they want to talk about because it obviously isn’t that important…grunt!

Dawson!…Smith is coming all the way from Scotland to sign my books, it makes me wonder why The Charming Mr. Abrahams cannot make it here from MA to sign all my other books…gruffle!

Thank goodness for cawfee breaks, or Mama would never know what was happening on the blog.
Another dreary day outside, but the Mud Room is bright and cheerful with good music and lots of fun stuff to do.
We like the English humor that we have been exposed to; Wodehouse, the old English comedies that are shown on PBS. “The Vicar of Dibley” is great for silly laughs, and “As Time Goes By” with Judy Densch is sweet and funny. Gee – funny shows that don’t depend on smart mouth kids, clueless parents or constant sexual innuendo – who would have thought?

I got an email this a.m. from facebookie saying someone had logged into my account from a computer that wasn’t the one I usually use, which is not often anyway. They locked my account so I needed to go to my account to unlock it and change my password. Well – the location for that other computer was in India.

Here’s the possible problem, AND I KNOW BETTER, is that they have my email address and my password that I use a lot. Now I need to check all my accounts that might use that password and change it.

Melanie, Ran out to the Magic Garden and planted a few Kentucky Wonder pole beans before work. We are supposed to get hit really hard with rain later on, so ground may be too wet for the next few days.

They have actually done the party. They surprised FOTAS by meeting her somewhere for lunch. She wore a ribbon that said Bachelorette, and then they went up and down streets shopping and window shopping. The restaurant was somewhere on a river and the town is a cool one. I just can’t remember the name of it right now.

Hello everyone. The picture of sleeping with your doggie is so realistic…just as it should work. Mom is laughing. The second picture could be funny except that no Sibe is going to chase no stinking ball…real or imagined. None, except The Hot One but even she will only chase it 3 times. After that, you’re on your own.
Mom used to be afraid of public speaking but she got over it. Pop, however,is terrified of speaking in public.

MollysMom: Scary facebookie experience! Seems we all are at the mercy of cyber-criminals. Extra caution required when clicking on links.
Lots of gluten free products these days, but usually more expensive.

When it gets really cold we have Little House on the Prarie nights where we wear our winter hats to bed. We also have three dogs nights as well. Once we had a five dog night; we were warm, but couldn’t move.

AJ is still on the road. He and Tenzing took the ferry out of Juneau yesterday. The crew gave Tenzing hot dogs. Life is good for Tenzing even if they didn’t let him drive the boat. Cell coverage is spotty at best on much of AJ’s journey so I hadn’t been in contact with him for a few days. He was driving in a snow storm. I told him about the BlogPaws conference, a day pass for the conference, the topic that SQPA is presenting and he said to go for it! Yeep! As his cell coverage strarted to break up I thought I hear him say something like, “…the…doors!” Now, exactly what I’m supposed to do with the doors is anyone’s guess. Belle Starr thinks he wants me to bedazzel the door, Luna’s thinks he wants me to lock the doors. He called about 45 minutes later when he had cell phone coverage again to say, “Lock the door!” in case I missed it on our last call.

Professor Stover likes Sweedish fish. Does it get any better than this? You tell me.

T&G: The title of the Alexander McCall Smith book is La’s Orchestra Saves the World. It “is an enchanting story celebrating friendship and the healing power of music, told with the lyrical warmth and charm we’ve come to love from this epic storyteller.” Or so it says on the back cover.My copy of the first book of #1 Ladies Detective Agency is safe at home in Canada. Heh, heh.

Oh no! We have to get a passport so we can go to Canada and rescue a wayward book. It seems to us that as Royal Corgis, we should be British subjects, and therefore should be able to pass into Canada unquestioned. But nooooooooooooooooooo….

And for the purposes of the current survey – I, Tupper am far too dignified to chase anything, round, flat or fluffy. Herding is NOT chasing – herding is an honorable profession. Chasing is for Kats with mice, or puppies with toys.

Gilly here – I will chase a cookie from here to eternity! Balls – not so much.

mmmmm, I have Celiac Disease which is a gene problem that will not process gluten. It is inherited. (Reason why YSAS has it also) There are also people who are just allergic to wheat. That’s not my problem.

When a celiac person takes gluten out of their diet, they show more distress when they eat some by accident.

YSAS is not as intolerant as I am. Two things for me . . . could be the HCV OR the fact that when Dan was still cooking he started adding wheat because a little wouldn’t be bad if I just didn’t know about it. That went on for three months. It was like being poisoned.

YSAS describes part of the “distress” as having steel wool cleaning out your insides. That’s a good description. There are also other parts to it I won’t go in to.

Celiac people can actually kill parts of the GI system so nutrients can not be taken in. I have some of that but not a lot.

Melanie, We have a relative that has celiac disease. If she is going to eat something with gluten she takes a pill first. I know last time we were all together, she couldn’t eat pizza, but she did eat regular pasta and just took a pill before eating. Maybe she doesn’t follow the rules like she is supposed to.

I’m amazed at B’s restraint. You can’t eat just one Sweedish fish, that’s for sure, but how can you just stop at five or six? Who’s with me?

Mine is the first signature on the Free the Fish from their Gluten Prison petition so Melanie could taste the Sweedish delight.

Rose: Belle Starr will deny it if she ever finds out that I shared this with you, but when she was younger she had the same problem. She would get so excited that, well…you know. If I so much said her name in the house I did so with the certainty that I would be cleaning up a misdeed. I stopped calling her by name; it’s amazing she answers to Belle Starr at all.

Justgottago! It sounds like the name of a summer camp. I think you’re right. I need to look at flights and then register for the day pass. Someone here who shall remain nameless, but I’ll give you a hint—her name starts with a M and ends with an elanie—entered a contest to win me a free pass. She didn’t win, but it looks like she was awarded a discount. Yeep! Now I just have to arrange for a large number of kats to attend for SQPA to herd.

Just looked up celiac disease. Our family member must have a mild form, because her symptoms are mainly fatigue and anaemia if she doesn’t keep to her diet and sometimes intestinal discomfort. She will complain about low energy if she doesn’t follow a gluten free diet for awhile. It sounds like your problems are more severe.

B: It is usually said, that the truth hurts, but in this case the truth is humorous and quite delicious.

Rose: Two signatures. It’s a start.

More to Rose: If you make it to Utah for the conference, I won’t make you dress like a cat unless, of course, you really want to do so. I’ve been considering other options for a gathering of Plunderers:

*Iditarod—goes with out saying
*One of the basketball games of KirbyT’s pop
*A quilt-a-thon where we’re likely to meet up with the likes of Wookie’s mom, Staff and now Jasper’s mom
*One of Stinky Mama’s shows where we can drum up business for her especially if it is a snooty show like last year
*A cast iron skillet tossing contest to cheer for our very own Dawson

Wolfie, A comment on your deductible not being returned. Generally, if the claim is not disputed or litigated your ded. will be returned quickly. If you company paid for you repair on your policy and then went to the other company for pay-back, you don’t get your ded. till they do. If they settle and end up only getting 50% of the physical damage costs, then you get 50% of you deductible returned. If your company paid from your policy, and you were at fault, then you would never get your ded. back. If you had handled everything thru the adverse driver’s company, then they could have paid for the repair, and you wouldn’t have had the ded. issue at all. Does that make sense?

Speaking of books, I have the most of the MacKayla Lane series in paperback up for the taking. The same friend that referred the Sookie series to me, also recommended this series. I found the first book in the series at the airport when I was on my way to the lower 48 this winter and read the entire series by the time I returned home. These books have some strong language in them. Let me know if you’re interested.

Rose, Mom thinks almost everything but quality dog food and treats are bad for dogs. I just thought I’d be nice and put them on her list so she could see if she liked them. I’m sure she will.
I have discovered that I love mangoes so I get a bite of one every time mom eats one.

My day is winding down, and I’ m getting ready for bed, as I have an early appointment with some lightning bolts. Just want to let you guys know I always read the previous day’s blog early in the morning to see what I’ve missed. These past few weeks, the Thursday blog has been very important to me because it is what I take to the hospital with me, and it’s all youse guys I think about as the anesthesia puts me gently to sleep. I swear I can feel youse guys there watching over me, making sure that all goes well, and the Smoochers gently tucking the quilt around me, keeping me safe.

Sold to kat with blue eyes for the price of a meow! Bluecat, this series was referred to me by the same person that introduced me to DG, and while there is no red heided Scot clad in a quilt, I hope you find them enjoyable.

Rose: Two of Team Smoochers are packing the sparkly, pink backpact. Masquers, is it safe to assume you will join them. ETB (estimated time for blur) is the crack of dawn Rose’s time.

Talkshow!…I just noticed that On Demand is showing The Graham Norton Show…sniff!…He is an Englishman who can be funny (sometimes). Haven’t seen him in years and years. This is for Stover, Gerard Butler is on show #10.06 (I think)….heh!…Plus Uggy the Oscar winning dog is on that show also…snort!….He is making fun of that really really fat dog that we all saw a photo of way back when…hmmmphf!…Gerard could definitely play the part of Bernie!…Wooooo!

Hey, y’all! Mom and Dad have been getting up early for brutal walks in the morning, so Mom has been konking out early and forgetting to turn the computer on for me. This time she grabbed a katnap while Dad was making supper, so she was awake long enough for me to nag her into letting me on the blog.

Rebecca: Everyone could come here for one of Dad’s basketball games, but since his games are usually over in the first quarter, I’m not sure it would be much of a gathering! (I hope Dad doesn’t read this — I’ll have to distract him!) What I really want to do is win the lottery, so I can take everyone up to Alaska for the Iditarod — first class all the way!!!

Rio: I hate to ask, but I have to, and it’s all Mom’s fault. She saved all the deadline information for this go-round of the MM, but now she can’t find it anywhere! I’m working on my project, but I need to know when I have to have it finished. (P.S. Don’t yell at me, it’s ALL MOM’S FAULT!!!)

Barb&Magpie: Rio is correct. We mentioned Touch this morning. Nana says she is unable to get into the show, even after watching 3 or 4 episodes.
Kirby: We would love to see one of your dad’s games. Maybe the enthusiastic Plunderer cheering section would change the outcome.

Kirby!…((((sigh))))….The store will be opening on May 26th. So you need to get photos first to Melanie for sizing and fixing. She will email them back to you…wheeze!…Then as quick as a bunny you need to email the photos and descriptions to Rebecca at least a week ahead of opening day..sniff!…Which is a few weeks from this Saturday, I do believe…grunt!

Well, that’s easy to remember. May 26th is Mom and Dad’s anniversary! Only this year they won’t be spending it together. Mom and a friend are going to another friend’s son’s wedding out of town, and they’re staying overnight there. Did you get all that? It’s kind of convoluted!

Kirby!…You were lucky that I was just thinking it was time to remind all you crafty online bookclub members about the deadline and how quickly it is approaching….wheeze!sneeze!…My friend will be scrambling this weekend thats for sure…heh!…Oh and she surprised all of us and said she is taking tomorrow off from the damned-busy-place…woooooo!

MollyPop’s Mom: You mentioned security breaches on facebookie this morning. We ran into a problem with Chase this afternoon. Couldn’t get online with the normal User ID and password…then the site closed down.

Rio: Gerald Butler has my vote to play Bernie.
Tell your Friend to have a good day away from the busy place

Before we go, Gerald Butler would be good as Bernie The other day we saw another actor that we thougth would also be a Bernie type, but now we forgot his name. He has sort of a stocky build, has dark blond hair and is in his 40s. Not one of the Baldwin boys, but looks a little them. This will now drive Barb crazy till she thinks of it!

Hi everyone – Melanie said to say goodnight – she was just plumb tuckered out and Patsy grabbed her by the pant leg and dragged her off to bed.
Did anyone see Letterman last night with the stupid pet tricks? There was a bulldog that would set up his own wooden rocking horse, get on it and rock. It was not only a riot, but we thought that if a bulldog could do it, bet a Pug could do it even better. Whaddya say Rio – are you up for a challenge?
(and keep your hot wing paw prints off our book!)

Good night Rose – sweet dreams both tonight and tomorrow – we will be with you.

OOOER!…We are watching another Hawkins shows…heh!yeeeep!…This one is really good n’ scary but we think we should go to bed soon….sniff!…Someone here has to load bags of dirt, rocks and other heavy gardening stuff tomorrow from one of those big stores in the morning into a car and out of a car and down where it should be…wheeze!… Her mother is itching to beautify some areas of the 500 acres of land we call home….sniff!sneeze!…Goodnight!

I just wanted to chime in on your dialogue and include my two cents. About the only software which I really don’t like is everything from IS3. That includes Stopzilla and the Shield deluxe. Neither of those software products are worthwhile plus they at times appear to be fake anti-virus. This might be off-topic but merely desired to throw it in anyway. Cheers.

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