I'm giving myself a nervous breakdown over this stupid scope tests. I cannot force myself to take the prep meds for my test tomorrow. Every instinct i have is screaming not to take this horrible crud. I've had 4 of these and they never find anything wrong or conclusive or even constructive to say except quit smoking or follow up in 6 months.

I starve myself to the point of exhaustion and have been through every poke prod needle xray scan scope humiliation and embarassment they can dream up and I'm still right back where i started. Underweight, sick, depressed, and at the end of my rope with all of this.

I do not like this GI doctor and don't feel comfortable with him. I'm just over it and want to be able to feel normal again.

Idk what i would do without this forum. I hate that others suffer with all of these ailments and it drives me crazy thinking about how most suffer needlessly and without less support than we have.