We Still Exist

Hey, everybody. Not to be a Debbie Downer here, but remember us? That place that had its capital city demolished by a devastating earthquake three and a half years ago? Remember how everyone was like, “Haiti, we won’t forget about you in your time of need!”

Remember how well everyone came together in the earthquake’s immediate aftermath? All those musicians came together to remake that “We Are The World” song, and everyone got so inspired! There was Jamie Foxx, Justin Bieber, T-Pain, and even Barbara fucking Streisand! How awesome was that! And you guys got all revved up and were like, “this time, we’re going to stick together forever and help bring Haiti back from this disaster!” Remember how good that made everyone feel? We sure felt great knowing that someone was looking out for us.

Surprise! You forgot about us. Way to fucking go, you hypocritical bastards.

You dropped the ball. Yeah you, guys who helped organize donations to the Red Cross for about a month, and you, girl who spent all that time making those posters to raise awareness. All of a sudden, you all just decided that “ehh, Haiti’s got this under control now.” But we don’t! At all! We still have no infrastructure, no system of public health, so we’re still sitting here, sleeping in our feces, trying to escape this squalor we’ve been living in for the last three godforsaken years. So give yourselves a pat on the back; way to fucking go.

We’re actually not asking for very much. We don’t expect to be on your mind every waking moment. But seriously, the water here is undrinkable, there’s no food, and 54 percent of us live on less than one dollar a day. Hey news organizations, instead of commenting on things like how Lebron’s mom is dating a rapper, maybe you could write an article or two about the cholera outbreak that has been ravaging our nation since 2010. Just an idea.

You know what’s the worst of it, though? When everyone promises that they’ve got your back, and that they’re not going to stop until you’re back on your feet. Then a stupid volcano in Iceland called Eyjafjallajökull explodes, and bam, it’s like you don’t even exist. Eyjafjallajökull? Seriously? All it took was one funny Scandinavian word that no one can pronounce, and immediately we take on the importance of dog shit. You should be ashamed.