Couples Counseling

My wife and I do not have a very happy marriage. There is nothing really wrong but I am afraid I no longer feel like I am in love with her and I think that I, and maybe both of us, would probably be happier on our own or with other people. I have not really spoken this out loud to my wife because she would be devastated by the idea of ending our marriage and so until I am sure it is something we should do I should not bring it up. We don’t really fight that much and we get along OK, but there is just very little spark between the two of us anymore.

If it were just the two of us I would just go ahead and do it, but we have 2 small children. I talked to my dad about what I should do and he told me to basically suck it up and that it was not fair to the kids to break up the family while they are still young, especially since there is nothing really dramatically wrong in the marriage. Basically he said I was selfish to put my own need for happiness and excitement in front of the needs of my small children for a dad in the house.

I love my kids and I want to do what is right for them but I also don’t want to waste my life away wishing I were somewhere else. At what age are children more able to handle divorce and a dad who doesn’t live at home anymore?

Linda Richardson Says...

Your situation is not uncommon and there are things that can be done. Please consider couples counseling to address your experience in your marriage. Counseling offers a great deal of potential to improve your situation. Your counselor may also be able to help you with decisions that are in the best interest of your children.