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Monday, February 13, 2012

Tips for Kissing

For kissing characters, that is.

Hope everyone really enjoyed their weekend. I predominately spent mine blowing my nose, napping, and watching Backyardigans with my 4 year old, who was also sick and sacked out on the couch. Fortunately, we're all feeling a lot better.

We'll continue our conversation about writing books that are worthy of our shelves later this week. Today I had promised a writer that I would answer her question, "I have come across a scene where my main character and her (boy)friend have to kiss. Do you have any tips on writing kissing scenes?"

An excellent day-before-Valentine's Day topic!

I certainly have tips for how to not write kissing scenes. I specifically remember a scene I wrote in 8th grade (well before my first kiss) that involved two characters kissing. Leading up to their kiss, I described the "magnetic forces" between them, which led to no end of ridicule from my boyfriend (whom I apparently let read the scene ... very un-Stephanie behavior...) So. Step 1: Avoid the magnetic forces.

I'm assuming we're talking about some sort of Big Kiss (like a first kiss or something), not just a swift peck goodbye before her boyfriend heads to class. For a Big Kiss here are a couple things you should consider:

The age of your characters

How long they have known each other

What this kiss means to them as individuals

I probably don't need to spend much time explaining why you should consider the age of your characters. And how long they've known each other is likely obvious as well. If these are two people who have only met a few months ago (or less), their kiss will be different than two people who have known each other since elementary school.

But once you've considered these two factors, it's important to think about the emotional impact of the kiss. What kind of emotional state is the girl in before the kiss? What does she think of herself? What does she think of him? Same goes for the fella - what does he think about himself? Everybody brings their own unique baggage into emotional situations. If your character was once told she was ugly, she might have different feelings going into a kiss than a girl who has always been chased by boys.

Here are a few additional tips:

Leading up to a Big Kiss (particularly a first kiss) consider having a few almost-kisses. Like a few times where she thinks he's going to kiss her, or whatever. Not only will it help build tension, it'll create more satisfaction when the kiss finally happens.

Don't worry about the kiss happening someplace great or at the"perfect" time. It depends on the book of course, but more than likely you're not going for that "fairy tale, life is absolutely perfect" effect.

Don't linger too long. Seriously - a little goes a long way. The couple should either be interrupted or the scene should end shortly after the liplock. That's not a hard and fast rule, of course, just something I've observed works well.

As with the art of kissing itself, writing a good kiss scene requires some trial and error. Don't expect to write it perfectly the first time. I tend to write any emotional scenes too fast, and during the editing process I have to slow the pacing.

Also, if you write historicals, you'll need to consider what was appropriate conduct for men and women during that time period.

Lastly, every genre is different. If you write fantasy, you'll likely handle kissing differently than if you write romantic suspense. Romantic scenes in a YA novel will possibly be different than romantic scenes in an adult novel. I suggest reading books in your genre and seeing how other authors have handled it.

Alright, let's get in the Valentine's spirit - favorite romantic movie or book? Of course any of Jane Austen's are hard to beat, but I'm particularly fond of The Princess Bride, both the book and the movie.

I read the Princess Bride book as well! HYSTERICAL! :D The movie is amazing of course. If anybody dislikes the movie... well that's just inconceivable.

I think my favorite Valentines movie would be a Jane Austen/ BBC type of movie (the new ones). I also like Pillow Talk starring Doris Day and the hotsome Rock Hudson. Or Sleepless in Seattle. Or The Shop Around the Corner. And You've Got Mail. ...okay I better stop before I get on a roll.

I don't usually write kissing scenes, but I did recently! :D It was real quick, unexpected and then the guy's gone and the girl was like, "...oh bye...wait WHAT?! DID HE JUST??" :O but she can't dwell on it because she has to go burn her house down xD (really confusing for everyone who hasn't read it)

Have a wonderful Valentines day everyone!!!

I was going to try and find a wonderful romantic movie quote but they're all so good! So... I guess all that's left to says is- "We'll always have Paris!"

This made me think of a new novel, THE COLONEL'S LADY by Laura Frantz. Best not-a-kiss scene in the history of the world. The actual first-kiss scene was great too, but primarily because of that earlier scene that was so taut with tension, but did NOT result in a kiss. So well done!!

I just finished a scene where I'd debated including a kiss or not. Opted to put it in, largely to illustrate the changes that the hero has undergone since the first kiss scene in, actually, the first scene, LOL.

I love the Princess Bride too.I also really enjoyed the romance story line in Charles Dickens's Great Expectations. I know this isn't really a romance book, but the story betwen Pip and Estella is excellent. A bit tragic perhaps, but wonderful nonetheless.

So glad you are feeling better, Stephanie! My three-almost-four-niece LOVES backyardigans. She now has deemed herself as Uniqua, or however you spell her name, and I'm supposed to be the little penguin...ah, the joys of a toddler's imagination. ;)

In my YA novel, I am trying to get my "big kiss" scene, down, so this was good for me to read. I think I've written about 5 times, and I still feel like it's not quite right. :P The whole "almost kiss" is a great idea though...I might have to try that one. :)

As far as kids' shows go, I think Backyardigans is about the least annoying out there. The music is decent, at least. I mean, I'm not rushing out to buy the Backyardigans CD or anything, but... And McKenna loves Tasha so her and your niece would get along great!

Every time I watch You've Got Mail, I want to open a bookstore... Kathleen Kelly rocks.

This post made me laugh. :D Thanks a lot, I usually have trouble with kissing scenes. Sometimes I go by other books I have read and movies I've seen (sinceI'veneverbeenkissedsorryTMI).

I heartily concur with your point that a little goes a long way. In a draft of my friend's book that I was editing, she has her characters kiss and it was sweet, so I went "Awwwww". After that, however, she went on to write that "The making out lasted about half an hour" which promptly ended my "Awwww" and gave way to a "Ew." Little moments like hands touching or a dashing rescue are more romantic than kisses, I think. In books.

My favorite romance is 2005 Pride and Prejudice HANDS DOWN. The light is gorgeous and they are gorgeous and the man I marry has to have a coat exactly like Mr. Darcy's when he comes striding over the dewy field.

A close second favorite to that couple are Molly Gibson and Roger from Wives and Daughters, also Robin Hood and Maid Marian from BBC (timeless).Anyway, happy Valentine's day :)

Ellyn, Kaye Dacus (http://kayedacus.com/) writes wonderful romance novels and says in her bio that she "isn't ashamed to say she's never been kissed," so don't sweat it!

And yes - I completely agree that nobody needs to know the making out lasted about half an hour. Speaking of hands touching, etc. being more romantic, that's done supremely well in the latest P&P when Mr. Darcy helps Elizabeth into the carriage that first time.

Hahaha . . . First, about the kiss. One of the funniest scenes in my WIP (or so I've been told), is when my MC, his step brother and sister, and another guy, are trying to evade the bad guys. They hide in a mall, and separate, with my MC giving instructions on what to do, because he's trained and they're not. Anyway, the bad guys are about to find out Jaxen and Liana, the step sister and second guy. Jaxen is hesitant, but Ryan, the MC, sees no other way out, so he tells him to do it, and Jaxen kisses Liana, without her knowing it. Oh, and Jaxen and Liana drive each other crazy. He likes her, but he annoys her.

My favorite romance? Well, recently, my mom got Made of Honor out of the library, and I must say it's pretty much the funniest romance I've ever seen. :D

Casablanca's my favorite. You just can't beat the black-and-white! As for writing emotional scenes... my characters are in all different ages, so I've had to pick up rules like this pretty fast to make my story satisfactory. And one of the very first things I learned was the very first rule here: Age matters! A pair of awkward teenagers who are sharing their first kiss will do so in a significantly different way than will an elderly couple who have been together for years, so age is one of the first things I consider when writing scenes like this.

The most romantic movie ever, hands down, is The Quiet Man with John Wayne and Maureen O'Hara. Their kissing scene is enough to give you heart palpitations because of all the romantic tension that leads up to it. You just know if those two headstrong people ever get together, there will be an earthquake!

When it comes to writing kissing scenes, I try to focus more on the emotions and feelings, the consequences, sensations and doubts that plague the hero and heroine more than the mechanics.

Thanks for the tips Stephanie :) Love that mvoie :) I really like the romance Sarah Dessen writes, Julie Klassen's too. But a favorite book...maybe The Princess Of The Midnight Ball...well to many to choose from :) SierraKeep Growing Beautiful♥ (Cause You Are!)

It's impossible for me to choose just one, so I'll do what I love and make a list :)Movies-Pride and Prejudice (Keira Knightley)-Sense and Sensibility (Emma Thompson)-Much Ado About Nothing -Leap Year-27 Dresses-13 going on 30Books-Pride and Prejudice-Persuasion-Sense and Sensibility-Love Comes Softly

Why, thank you, Sarah! It's a little more feminine than I'd like (I try to keep things somewhat gender neutral out of sensitivity to the fellas who hang out here) but it matched the banner the best. :)

You handled this topic extremely well, Stephanie! Did you have any idea that the Writers Ally was doing the same topic? Ya'll supported each other well. :) Had to laugh when I saw both of those emails in my inbox. :)

I'm going to see The Vow this weekend and I hope that is just as much a romantic home-run as the previews promise. Otherwise, my vote goes to Karen Witemeyer. I recently finished Head in the Clouds, which I looooooved, partly because the heroine is feminine, feisty, short, and clumsy (like me) and partly because it is sooooo funny. I'm reading Tailor-Made Bride right now and it's looking just as good!

The Scarlet Pimpernel and Pride and Prejudice are my all-time favorite love stories, I think - book and movie for both of them. They are just beyond epic.

Interestingly, in both The Scarlet Pimpernel and Love Comes Softly (which I also adore, especially the book), the romance takes place between two people who are already married. Kind of gives it a twist. Very well done in both, though.

Okay, this was actually really helpful. :-) Thank you! Oh gosh, my favorite romantic movie or book? I don't read many romantic books, but probably the Last Song would be my favorite romantic book. (Not the movie. I didn't like the movie. Just the book. haha) And favorite romantic movie? Well, it isn't a 'romance' movie, but the Lord of the Rings has fantastic romantic content. It was great. :-) Happy late Valentine's day! Or, in my case, Happy late single and proud day. ;-)

Haha, sorry I'm late commenting here! I just started following your blog, Stephanie, and the other day I spent an hour or two just browsing through your posts. I'm currently revising my WIP, and so I bookmarked a ton of posts and compiled a whole bunch of notes from your blog to keep in mind as I rewrite it. Things like, "Don't let characters say what they mean all the time," and "R.U.E." and "Let her throw up!" Your tips and information have been really helpful, thank you so much! This post is very good as well, and I'll have to keep it in mind so any kissing scenes in the WIP aren't too corny, haha. ;)

As for favorite romantic movie, I have to say that mine is Titanic, hands-down. I can't tell you how much I adore that movie!! It's pretty tragic, of course, but still absolutely amazing. I'm planning to rewatch it soon, and cannot wait. :)

Taylor, I'm so glad you've found Go Teen Writers! And I'm about due for a Titanic viewing. It came out when I was a freshman in high school, and I saw it four times in the theaters. (This so dates me, but movie tickets were only $3.25 to $5 at that time...)