For well over a month, the video of Ray Rice punching his then-girlfriend Janay, and knocking her out cold, has been played and replayed, analyzed, demonized, and used as a rallying cry. Now that his Appeal is imminent, it is time to ask what—if any-- other story-lines might be linked to this incident, or does the clip say all that needs to be said? For many, Rice’s violence toward his partner was unforgivable, and public outcry over his 2-game suspension created a media firestorm that resulted in a richly deserved indefinite suspension / severance from the Ravens. While Rice’s revised formal punishment was, ostensibly, in response to the domestic violence in the video, outrage has lingered because the knock-out punch to his then-fiancé was not the most disturbing aspect of his behavior. Rather, it was his utter lack of remorse that galvanized public opinion. Rice snapped, and lost control. But when he saw the effect of his reactiveness, he did not crumple to her side, cradle her, try to revive her, or seem upset to have hit her so hard as to knock her out. It is his glaring lack of human relating, of immediate contrition and assistance, that so stunned the public. A repentant Ray, an ashamed, appalled, contrite Ray, would not have called out the cultural censure that an indifferent Ray, dragging Janay’s limp body off the elevator like a sack of potatoes, then placing a call on his cell-phone, brought down upon his head. Ray Rice has become the NFL fall-guy, the official scapegoat for the “tough new stance” on domestic violence. The incident did not simply blow over (as it had for Greg Hardy of the Panthers and Ray MacDonald of the 49’ers). Fallout from the video continues to ripple, and as Rice remains, for the main part, silent (excepting one press-conference, which did not go far enough) his window of opportunity has all-but-closed.

Without timely repentant overtures, culture has been unwilling to offer Rice the possibility of forgiveness. His career has been forfeit, his HS trophies and plaques stripped from places of honor, his official NFL jersey bought back / traded in by the League. He has been banished, and—for now at least-- given no possibility of redemption. And, his continued relative unresponsiveness is sealing this fate. Without actively campaigning for forgiveness, Rice has seemingly lost the possibility to atone, leaving a single, disconcerting question: what extremes might this man—or any (wo)man who has lost everything, suffered unrelenting public shame, and been given no way to redeem him or herself—be driven to? The question is not simply should he be barred from the NFL (was his punishment legal?) but should he be socially branded for his transgression, barred from getting past his public disgrace--unable to atone, be forgiven, and reintegrated into social and professional communities?

We all act badly at times, and need to be able to made amends. Why hasn’t Rice gone all-out in an attempt to do so? In the face of even rudimentary pro-active damage-control, it would seem reasonable to hand Rice costly professional and social penalties, but honor his overtures, thereby providing him a road-map for redemption. Make him the poster-boy for the emotional support that players, who are rewarded by violence at game-time, need in their personal lives. The NFL’s youngest fans need to know that it is possible to survive disgrace, but that one must atone for bad behavior, and allow one’s punishment to pave the road to re-admission to society—even if it is on vastly different terms. Hope itself cannot be forfeit These young fans, as well as women carefully monitoring this case, need to know that when violence is enacted off the field, the penalties will be steep, and forgiveness will need to be earned. When such efforts are lacking (even if on the seemingly bad advice of counsel), the community has little choice but to cast out these members, who are threats to the integrity of the whole.