There's a chill that goes through your spine around October of every year … the first time you hear some ambient bit of Christmas music playing in the distance. It's usually something innocuous … maybe even something lovely. But in your heart, you know what's coming. You know the onslaught is about to begin. Soon, you will be surrounded by holiday music. The good songs will be overplayed to the point that they will be robbed of any beauty or meaning. A song that's really just a mild trifle — like, say, “Christmas Wrapping,” by the Waitresses — will induce a blinding rage that's totally disproportionate to the actual quality of the song. And the songs that are actively bad? You know, from the season's first innocent carol, played over the speakers at the grocery store, that they are coming. And they will rule.

Now that the holiday season is wrapping up, let's take a look at the worst Christmas songs of all … the ones which, hopefully, we won't have to put up with for another year.

•“Dominick the Donkey,” by Lou Monte: In an informal poll on Facebook and Twitter of the worst Christmas songs ever, this was by far the overwhelming winner. Oddly, I was completely unfamiliar, and at first thought people were putting me on. I did not believe that there was a song about “an Italian Christmas donkey,” with bizarre hee-haw noises as the chorus. I was wrong, and having now heard it … I can never unhear it. This song makes me feel vaguely embarrassed on behalf of all of my Italian ancestors.

•“I'm Gonna Spend My Christmas With a Dalek,” by the Go-Go's: Regular readers of Pop Culture Notebook on Telegram.com will know I'm a rather large fan of the British sci-fi TV show, “Doctor Who.” But this 1965 novelty song featuring the Doctor's terrifying nemeses, The Daleks, is beyond the pale, replacing their menacing, robotic battle cry of “EXTERMINATE!” with “I … LOVE … YOU!” … in the same creepy voice. No. Just … no. The Daleks are not the Chipmunks. Not even at Christmas.

•“Marshmallow World,” by Bing Crosby: Yes, we're criticizing a song popularized by Bing, Dean, Frank and just about everybody else who was in The Rat Pack. But really, there's only so much holiday sugar one can tolerate before one's teeth ache, and the line “It's a yum-yummy world made for sweethearts” may well be that threshold. We look forward to your letters.

•“The Christmas Shoes,” by NewSong: Sentimental is fine at the holidays. Really. If there is a time for sentiment, this is it. But “The Christmas Shoes” — another clear winner in the “worst song” poll — is more manipulative than just about anything. Basically, it's a punched up tale of a boy in line at the store on Christmas Eve, trying to buy shoes for his dying mother, and it claws cynically for the heartstrings with overwrought melodrama.

•“Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time,” by Paul McCartney: Listening to this again, one's forced to wonder what happened to McCartney's voice and any sense of depth or contrast it had when he was with the Beatles. Certainly, he's had a lot of good moments since the Fab Four broke up, but this is flat and monotonous in ways that defy description, save perhaps pointing to a patch of asphalt by way of comparison.

•“What Do You Get A Wookie For Christmas (“When He Already Owns A Comb?)” from “Christmas in the Stars: Star Wars Christmas Album”: If anyone had suspicions that the “Star Wars” franchise might have a run in with the dark side of The Force in its future, this crass bit of holiday commercialism, which manages to tarnish both the films and the holiday in one fell swoop, was all the confirmation they needed. “He'll never wear galoshes … or a hat upon his furry dome.” Sigh.

•“Do They Know It's Christmas Time At All,” by Band Aid and “We Are the World,” by USA for Africa: Which road is it that's paved with good intentions? These songs constitute part of a valiant effort to raise awareness in the West about famine in Africa, and in that, it probably succeeded. But many years later, it's hard not to listen to lines such as “And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas time/ The greatest gift they'll get this year is life/ Where nothing ever grows, no rain or rivers flow/ Do they know it's Christmas time at all?” and not suspect we were being just a little patronizing.

•“Santa's Evil Twin,” by Rich “A.D.” Leufstedt: To tell the truth, I actually rather like Rich Leufstedt's tale of Santa's evil doppelganger, but when we were doing the Facebook poll for inspiration, the local musician and ukulele aficionado lobbied hard for its inclusion. And if he wants to put himself on the musical naughty list, who are we to argue? In any case, the song's worth a chuckle and has some great vocals by local songstress Helen Sheldon Beaumont. Give the song a listen and make your own decision!

•“Last Christmas,” by Wham: Oh, Wham. I was almost reluctant to throw this on the list, because it's hard not to suspect that George Michael knows how over the top he's being here. After all, this is the man who brought us “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.” Still, with lyrics such as “Last Christmas/ I gave you my heart/ But the very next day you gave it away/ This year/ To save me from tears/ I'll give it to someone special,” one suspects Michael may want to consider refraining from grand romantic gestures at the holidays. I'm just saying.

•“I Think You Might Like It,” by Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta: As we've pounded on this song recently, we don't have too much more to say, save that the only thing that could possibly be worse than this song is the inevitable rendition that will appear on “Glee.”

•“Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer,” by Elmo and Patsy Trigg Shropshire: This holiday tale of a family's joy at the Christmas miracle of Grandma's sudden reindeer-related demise tops many lists of the worst Christmas song ever recorded, and deservedly so. But you know what? As bad as it is — and it is bad — it's still better than a great deal of the schlocky, manipulative Christmas offerings that dominate the airwaves. So maybe it deserves something of a reprieve. After all, the holidays are a time for forgiveness, aren't they? Let the Grinch-itude end here!

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