I could forgive you, even your cruelty, if it were not for your calm.”
― G.K. Chesterton, The Man Who Was Thursday

“You overrate my capacity of love. I don't possess half the warmth of nature you believe me to have. An unprotected childhood in a cold world has beaten gentleness out of me.”
― Thomas Hardy, Far from the Madding Crowd

I said to her, “Even though you knew you were getting a divorce, that it was over, wasnʼt there love left in your heart for him?” She said, “No. None at all.” I said, “ After 25 years of marriage? Two and a half decades of sharing a bed, a home, a life, two children? There was no love in your heart for him at all?” She said, “None. I was done with him. I felt nothing. It was over. That is all.”

Seems as though women have a switch in their hearts, and when it switches off, thereʼs nothing that can be done. What was once warm becomes cold, what was once tender become callous. The switch does not time travel backwards or forwards and cannot be undone. Time has no effect on it. The enormity of the change in temperature is bewildering at first, hard to believe. After initial confusion, amazement bubbles up. Awe. Then the inevitable despair, sorrow and surrender to the new reality. Where once was love: spiders and dust. Where once was connection: ice and chill. This is what happens When a Woman Goes Cold.

She didn’t get mad, she didn’t even cry
She lit a cigarette and said goodbye
I must a’ missed a sign, I missed a turn somewhere
I looked in her eyes, I saw a stranger there

It’s the way she’s made it’s a natural fact
Once she’s really gone, she can’t come back
Ain’t no wedding dress ain’t no band of gold
Gonna keep her there, when a woman goes cold

You’re no longer her concern
Scorched earth cannot burn
It’s out of your control when a woman goes cold
She won’t give an inch she won’t be convinced
Ain’t no mercy in her soul when a woman goes cold

I wish she’d scream and shout, I wish she’d slam a door
I wish she’d curse my name like she’s done before
But she looks through me like I’m not there
And I’m dying here, and she just don’t care

You’re no longer her concern
Scorched earth cannot burn
It’s out of your control when a woman goes cold
She won’t give an inch she won’t be convinced
Ain’t no mercy in her soul when a woman goes cold
When a woman goes cold, when a woman goes cold
When a woman goes cold when a woman goes cold

My mama used to say “Your father has me so confused that I don’t know my ass from my elbow." When I was a kid, I didn’t know what she was trying to tell me. Today, it makes perfect sense.

Intense emotion piled on top of intense emotion over time… leads to utter confusion. My parent’s marriage was a roller coaster ride that ended in divorce after 20 turbulent years, and the turmoil involved in its slow demise ended up leaving us all discombobulated. Clarity came, but it took years.The battles of human love going bad -- the fog of war-- layers of shifting emotional sands, leave the mind in disarray. We end up upside down, spinning round, reaching for what was just there and is now nowhere to be found.What’s real now? What’s not? Who am I? Who are you? What were we? What are we now? In the thick of it, these are unanswerable questions. 'Till the roller coaster stops and till the dust clears, you just can’t tell False From True.

LYRICS: FALSE FROM TRUE

Jagged edges broken parts
Where you end and where I start
Got so tangled up in you
I can’t tell false from true
You woke up inside a cage
I woke up consumed with rage
A million miles from our first kiss
How does love turn into this?

A stranger showed up in your eyes
Hard as steel, cold as ice
I tried and tried but I could not break through
There’s two of you and one don’t feel
And I don’t know which one is real
Loving you has left me black and blue
I can’t tell false from true

Where’d you go where are you now?
Can you feel my heart somehow?
Still so full of love you
But it can’t tell false from true

A stranger showed up in your eyes
Hard as steel, cold as ice
I tried and tried but I could not break through
There’s two of you and one don’t feel
And I don’t know which one is real
Loving you has left me black and blue
I can’t tell false from true
I can’t tell false from true

http://youtu.be/5_vzGnX60eY
Some things go together naturally. There is inevitability in their coupling. Things like beans and rice, peanut butter and jelly, salt and pepper, wine and cheese, bread and butter. Cake and icing, syrup and pancakes, peaches and cream, sugar and spice. Bacon and eggs, spaghetti and meatballs, salt and pepper, fish and chips, corned beef and cabbage, macaroni and cheese. Chips and salsa, cereal and milk. Thunder and lightening, fire and rain. Ebony and ivory, fork and knife, nuts and bolts. Lock and key, brush and comb, silver and gold. Spring and rain. Rock and roll, fire and brimstone. Moon and stars. And for all the obvious reasons...

http://youtu.be/ioRWWfd_Q4w
Did Robert Johnson, King of the Delta Blues Singers who died at age 27, really sell his soul to the devil at the Crossroads? And did Satin come to collect his debt? What does it mean to sell your soul? Can you actually, literally, sell your soul? Robert Johnson played street corners and juke joints. He was ever roaming and ever lonely. He wrote songs that romanticized the traveling life and became a musical hero to musicians who followed in his footsteps. With unprecedented intensity, he transformed his life’s hardships into poetic heights- and mined deep emotional depths. He made beauty out of pain. Johnson took the intense loneliness, terrors and tortuous circumstances that came with being an African-American in the South in the Depression, and transformed his personal experience into music of universal relevance. If anyone would understand the sorrow of selling one’s soul, it would be Robert Johnson. So a visit to his grave, searching for redemption, in solidarity and prayer, in hopes of connecting with the spirit of a fellow traveller during a hard time, a time of deep questioning, well, it just makes sense…

This song is a co-write with my very talented singer/songwriter friend, Ben Glover.

http://youtu.be/jhXeMPzTdjkI’ve always been drawn to the metaphor of the Phoenix rising, because it brings with it a blessed grace, a new kindness, a new sense of purpose, and a passionate self worth. The new bird is on a mission. From the ashes of a perfect defeat comes a new life. Fire, death, renewal, rebirth and the beginning of a new life-- ashes into flame. But how does a Phoenix rising from the ashes find its wings? What is the process by which deep and mighty blows deepen us, open us, make us better people? How does calamity and deep pain create deep empathy? These are big questions, and I am not the one to answer them here. It is a mystery, this sacred conversion of one form of life energy into another. But I know this-- a fundamental change in character, transformation, can happen after annihilation of life as we knew it. On the other side of wretched: Worthy.

http://youtu.be/-clukLFabq8
When the first shadows start to fall at the end of the day, when the early stars begin to twinkle, in that tiny window between daylight and dark when the cicadas and crickets start to sing, my heart can get a little heavy. Something deep inside my chest sinks, but then, a moment later, something else rises. I’ve never really been able to nail down the exact words but sorrow/hope comes close. As I let go of the day and lean into the night, there’s shift that moves from sadness to a certain kind of faith, an embracing of the night, trusting in the hand that guides what’s next. If I stay still and listen, these thoughts and feelings can lead to a conscious realization of my mortality, and an awareness of those souls who have passed on. We are here for only a short while, and what if our journey in this life is about learning to give and receive love?

What if our struggle with love is the way, the only way… we learn to love better? If you believe that your soul is traveling through this world but bound for elsewhere, if you believe that maybe we are called to be more than strangers fighting for our own survival, if you believe that just as others have mattered to you, you might in turn matter to others no matter the struggles you’ve had, then maybe you’ll agree that we are all just Walking Each Other Home.

Walking Each Other Home, was written with my good friend Gretchen Peters, and is one of three collaborations with Gretchen on this album.

One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,
but by making the darkness conscious. - Carl Jung

After years of being taught that the way to deal with painful emotions is to get rid of them, it can take a lot of re-schooling to learn to sit with them instead. But learning how to live alone, sitting with difficult feelings is like panning for gold. Those who have slept in the wilderness know things that those who sleep in comfortable houses may never know. This song is about learning how to sleep in the wilderness.

I wrote this with my friend Gretchen Peters, and it contains a long list of firsts. It was our first co-write, it was Buddy Miller’s first placement as Music Supervisor for the ABC TV Hit Show Nashville, it was the first song of Nashville’s Season 2, and it was my first time to work in the studio with the Legendary Master of Twang, Duane Eddy. All in all, it’s been a magical little song. We wrote it in a very short period of time, I’d say less than 2 hours. It came fast, and I am not sure how we did it. This is always how it goes with songs like this, I forget writing them. It almost like it happened in a dream. I remember Gretchen sitting at her little red piano working on a melody. I remember her saying maybe we should do a list, “First you fall, then you”…. and so on, and the rest is a blur. Lines came to me, lines came to her, and we rode the flow. We emerged with this song in short period of time, did a rough demo, and the rest is history.

LYRICS: HOW YOU LEARN TO LIVE ALONE

First you fall then you fly
And you believe that you belong up in the sky
Flap your arms as you run, every revolution
Brings you closer to the sun
You fall asleep in motion in uncharted hemispheres
And wake up with the stars falling down around your ears
When they hit the ground they’re nothing but stones
That’s how you learn to live alone
That’s how you learn to live alone

Bit by bit, you slip away
You loose yourself in pieces in the things that you don’t say
You’re not here, but you’re still there
The sun goes up, the sun goes down
And you’re not sure you care
You live inside the false, till you don’t recognize the true
People send you pictures, and you can’t believe it’s you
It’s been years since your house has felt like home
That’s how you learn to live alone
That’s how you learn to live alone

It don’t feel right, but it’s not wrong
It’s just hard to start again this far along
Brick by brick, the letting go
As you walk away from everything you know
You release resistance, lean into the wind
Till the roof begins to crumble and the rain comes pouring in
And you sit there in the rubble, till the rubble feels like home
That’s how you learn to live alone
That’s how you learn to live alone
That’s how you learn to live alone

Another Train, the final song on Trouble and Love, is co-written by Ben Glover. It is a song of hope, of faith, of affirmation of life’s renewals and rebirths. On the other side of betrayal, on the other side of hurt, on the other side of sorrow, sits the train station. And headed for the station, is another train. May we all find our way there somehow, and catch that next train.

And so it is. Another record of songs I’ve written in an attempt to make sense of a few of life’s mysteries, an attempt to capture lightening in a bottle. This time, though, it was a “we” project from the very first song written. This record was the most collaborative of my career, every single song a co-write: each track recorded live-to-tape by my collaborator and friend the brilliant engineer/producer Patrick Granado, who selected the band and the songs and brought the best players in Nashville to the recording studio to cut them. The musicians played and sang their beautiful hearts out.

This record has my name on it, and I will be given the credit or blame for its contents…but truly, it’s the work of a collective, a group of highly talented and creative people that I deeply respect, all friends, all masters of their art, all at the height of their powers. It was a thrill to work with each and every one of them, and I encourage listeners to search out these names on the credits of this CD.

Mary Gauthier’s new album, Trouble & Love, is a brilliant collection of truthful and personal songs that reflect a total human experience: Love, loss, and a life transformed. Anyone who has loved and lost can’t fail to be moved by this devastatingly beautiful record.

I played The Grand Ole Opry. Yes indeed, I sure did. It was a thrill, and honour, and an amazing emotional ride into the stratosphere. I started with "Mercy Now," and the amazing Opry House Band played and sang with me. Then we kicked into "Another Train" from my new record, with Radney Foster, Kathy Mattea and Marty Stuart joining me on stage. We all hit a lick, became one in song, the genie came out of the bottle, and magic happened. The audience felt it, and when the song ended, they stood up out of their seats and went a little nuts. I looked up and out at the standing ovation and all I could do was shake my head, hug my friends, and thank the heavens that I managed to live long enough to see this happen. On a lot of levels, it was dreamlike.Thanks goodness there’s pictures, 'cause it actually feels like a dream.
A HUGE thank you to Marty Stuart, whose generosity and kindness made this opportunity possible. Sometimes, life is just a whole lot of fun!

Mary Gauthier joins forces with Sam Baker for a limited edition 7-inch Vinyl release. On one side is Mary's new "When A Woman Goes Cold," and on the other is Sam's "Ditch." Collectors take note: Only 1000 were made, and there are not many left.

Hello Everyone!
I’ve officially kicked off the preview tour for my new release on Proper Records UK, and am in Europe right now doing interviews, shows, and teaching a songwriting workshop in Glasgow.

I started off in London, Camden and am now in Scotland where I got to perform in Paisley Abby—what a place to sing! It’s 850 years old, and has somehow survived that many years of human turmoil. I could not stop thinking about the thousands of WWI and WWII widows and children on their knees in that ancient Kirk. And those that came before them. 850 years of spook on top of spook on top of spook. I felt them in the resonance of the echoes at the end of each song. Thanks, Glasgow, for having me and to Paul Brady for letting me share the stage.

Pre-Order The New CD

My new record is called Trouble and Love, and will be in stores June 10. I’m offering signed pre-orders HERE, and they will be mailed in early June, before the record hits the streets. I co-produced this one myself with the brilliant engineer Patrick Granado, and I am very proud of this collection of songs. It's the best work I have done so far, I think.

I’m working with smart folks all over the world to make this record a success, and we’re having fun in the process. I will be posting a Lyric video of each of the 8 songs every Monday, so look for an email with a link each week starting April 21!

The Letter Series

CD Baby asked me to write the first letter for their “Letter Series,” which is based on Rainer Maria Rilke’s brilliant Letters To A Young Poet. I was honored to do so. Here’s what I came up with: Mary Gauthier’s Letter To A Young Songwriter.

April 19 is Record Store Day

I have teamed up with my friend Sam Baker for record store day, and we are splitting a 7-inch single, with very limited pressing. Sam’s song is on one side, mine on the other. My song is called “When A Woman Goes Cold,” and it’s the first cut off my new record.

You can pick one up at your local record store, or at CD Baby.com on April 19.. But you need a real record player to play it! Visit the Record Store Day website to find a store near you.

Big Shows in L.A. & Zip Code Update

I’ll be performing at The Grammy Museum in Los Angeles on April 21. Hurry up and get tickets on these if you want to go, because it will sell out.

Songwriting Workshop Update

My first Nashville Performing Songwriter Creative Workshop took place in February.

A huge thank you to the 20 students who came and shared themselves and their songs in my inaugural workshop. We had a jam-packed weekend as Lydia Hutchinson and I tried to balance showing off some of the people and places that make Nashville great, with deep intense song work. We kicked off the workshop with a pre Mardi Gras gathering to break the ice on Thursday Night. I made some Jambalaya and Jalapeno Cornbread, Lydia brought a Kings Cake and Mardi Gras beads, and we all spent a little time together before the workshop got started the following morning.

We started the first daybright and early working on students’ songs. The brilliant Don Henry helped me out in the afternoon, and then we ended the night at The Bluebird watching the great Don Schlitz weave his magic. Day two was spent working on songs and Gretchen Peters joined us as a guest speaker that afternoon before we all headed to dinner at Monell’s, one of my favorite Nashville family-style restaurants.

Sunday we worked even harder on songs and I tried to give the class as many tools for their writing tool kit as I had time to offer. We wrapped it up right before an ice storm with thunder sleet made the roads impassable—so some of our group ended up staying extra days and using it as a writing retreat.

My partnership with Performing Songwriter’s event guru Lydia Hutchinson will continue with another workshop in a couple of weeks. It’s sold out, but be sure to SIGN UP HERE if you want to be the first to know about any new upcoming events.