Mother’s Day is Not for Everyone

Mother’s Day is hard for many people. They want to do the right thing, and they can’t find a card for their mother that doesn’t aggrandize a childhood that for them was painful and frightening.

Besides the many types of abuse children experience such as neglect, abandonment, physical, sexual, verbal abuse or violence, they may not realize the anger, depression, personality and mood disorders they carry in both their conscious and un-conscious. These effects are carried in their bodies and effect their thinking and behavior. How do they find the “loving” card that is often expected?

Then there are people who cannot send a card due to the passing of their mother, many do not know who their mother is. For me, I kept loving and buying beautiful cards for my mother, with the hope she would know how much I needed her kindness and her love – that she would appreciate how much I longed for her to notice me and hear my voice.

My mother is gone now I never had the experience of being with a loving, and kind mother or to understand why she was not. I remained a wonderful, attentive, nurturing daughter to the very end of her life.

My legacy is that I remain loving, even in the face of wounding and hardship. I approach life, loving. That makes life beautiful, and gratifying.

I’m looking forward to my Mother’s Day cards. My children had a good, loving mother. I think that helped to heal me.

Happy Mothers’ Day to those who tried, and to those who succeeded.

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About Paula Susan

Paula Susan, MSW, LCSW, Masters in Clinical Social Work & Psychology; specialist in Trauma and Relationships since 1982. In 1991, I integrated the powerfully transformative process of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). Research demonstrates that it facilitates life-altering changes more efficiently and effectively than talk therapy alone. I teach skills such as communication and anxiety relief to improve connection with others. Over the decades, I’ve come to respect how much damage even small traumatic experiences inflict on our core beliefs about ourselves and the world around us. I consider it a privilege to help my clients understand and change what has undermined their happiness and their relationships. I do it with warmth, integrity, humor, and profound respect for those who care about the quality of this small piece of time we have on earth.www.paulasusan.com

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