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What Made You Care About Money?

This is a guest post from Robert Brokamp of The Motley Fool. Robert is a Certified Financial Planner and the advisor for The Motley Fool’s Rule Your Retirement service. He contributes one new article to Get Rich Slowly every two weeks.

I’ve discovered the secret to becoming financially responsible: Go into serious debt. Or get married, divorced, or pregnant. And reading a good book helps.

At least, that’s what you told me. A few weeks ago, I asked you — the intergalactic Get Rich Slowly audience — for the stories behind your desire to get your financial acts together. We aren’t born wanting to be frugal, I argued, so for most people, something has to happen to inspire monetary responsibility.

There were approximately 80 responses, and I have summarized the results in the table below in a very non-scientific, arbitrary way. (What do you expect from someone who grew up in Florida?) You non-Floridians will notice that the percentages add up to more than 100% because some responses cited more than one reason for financial rectitude.

So here they are, ranked according to most common responses — the reasons you gave for your money maturity:

Debt forced me to get better with money

22.5%

I got engaged, married, and/or I reproduced

15.0%

I got divorced, dumped, or widowed

12.5%

I read a great book

12.5%

I craved financial independence or a better life

11.3%

I was making more money but had nothing to show for it

11.3%

Someone taught me well

8.8%

Calculators/spreadsheets showed me the benefits of saving

7.5%

I saw my parents or others struggle

7.5%

I had a healthcare-related awakening

7.5%

I suddenly had more money and wanted to be smart with it

5.0%

I realized I was on my own

3.8%

I wanted a tattoo

1.3%

Clearly, there are many roads to financial responsibility — including, it seems, financial irresponsibility, since getting into overwhelming debt was the number one reason. I suppose it’s the proverbial hitting the bottom of the barrel, the wake-up call many of us need to really take money seriously.

But while there were many different kinds of “aha!” moments, the next steps were very similar — and likely familiar to you longtime readers. Stuff like:

spend less

eliminate debt

save for retirement

downsize if necessary

become educated

seek out support

For that last one, if you need encouragement, read the comments following my original article. You’ll read plenty of inspiring stories about people digging themselves out of some very deep financial holes.

As a financial writer, I was heartened to read that books and websites played a prominent part in people’s money motivation. Two books that were mentioned a few times were The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey and Your Money and Your Life by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez. I, too, think these are very helpful, eye-opening books.

I particularly find Dominguez’s story interesting. He retired in 1969 at the age of 31 on $100,000. He invested his money in Treasuries and lived on the interest. By the time he died in 1997, he was living on $7,000 to $13,000 a year (depending on what article you read). To manage, he reportedly lived in a group home with 30 people and did a lot of recycling, at least according to one source. From what I could tell, he was perfectly happy with this lifestyle.

I bring this up because there are lots of reasons to get your financial act together. In this article, we’ve discussed what’s happened in the past. But there’s also the question of what will keep you going. Some people, like Dominguez, can live very simply on very little money. He gave up a lot of consumerism in order to spend most of his life not working. Others have other plans — travel, RVs, vacation homes, eating out, whatever. It seems to me that having those goals always in mind is key to keeping your financial plan on track.

And to having enough money for a tattoo.

J.D.’s note: One of my key tenets is that the road to wealth is paved with goals. It’s difficult to get your financial house in order until you know why you’re doing so. I’m not convinced about the tattoo, though!

For me, after I graduated from college I took a personal finance class through the local adult ed which was the first time I started caring about and managing my money.

#2 after I graduated from professional school and bought my first house. This is when I started tracking my spending, living off a spending plan, and investing for retirement and other goals.

#3 after I got married to Mr. Sam and we combined finances, that is when I read Total Money Makeover, we paid off $55,500 in debt (most of which ‘belonged’ to Mr. Sam), stopped using credit cards, created a family spending plan and decided that I/we wanted to live a debt free life.

So for me, paying close attention to my finances seems to come hand in hand with other major life events. But presently we are still 2 1/2 years after #3 very focused on our finances, our savings goals (short and long term) and sticking to our spending plan.

What we need to do to get people to care about money is to get people to care about how having money can change their lives. All personal finance planning should be thought of as Life Goal Pursuit Planning.

Those who care about money handle their money well. Most do not care. But all can be made to care. The key is making a different pitch to each person. What works for each person is to show how handling money well can help that particular person achieve his or her most important Life Goals.

For me, I definitely fall into the category of “suddenly getting more money”. I grew up in a household that didn’t have much money, so after landing a successful career, I suddenly was making more money than my parents combined. I was faced with a choice – whether to continue to work 40+ hours a week and live a life where I buy whatever I want, possibly having to work until I’m 70, or being smarter with my money and getting out of the rat race early. Now I’m 28 years old and carrying my first child, and looking at the possibility of taking 6 months leave, and working only part time beyond that. Being smart with my money has allowed me to focus more on the things that are important in life.

It’s weird that you find Domiguez’s story interesting, because it scares the hell out of me!

“He retired in 1969 at the age of 31 on $100,000. He invested his money in Treasuries and lived on the interest. By the time he died in 1997, he was living on $7,000 to $13,000 a year (depending on what article you read). To manage, he reportedly lived in a group home with 30 people and did a lot of recycling, at least according to one source.”

It is very sad that he never lived to see his 60′s, but in a way it was a good thing becuase his money would never have lasted, and he would have toiled away at recycling for the rest of his years. I would say he only semi-retired, since he obviously had to start recycling to supplement what was clearly NOT enough income to retire on. I never read his book – was this the retirement he had dreamed about? Digging through trash for cans and living in a group home with 30 other people who couldn’t afford any better? I would not be surprised if his lifestyle hastened his early demise.

I agree with Rob Bennett, that money is merely a means to live the lifestyle you dream about. The trick is figuring out how much of those paper green things you need to achieve it properly.

Since I missed the post where you asked people to give their stories, I guess I’ll throw in my two cents here.

For me, getting my financial act together wasn’t really due to any of the reasons cited in today’s post. I had to start caring a lot about money in the past 4 years or so because of a number of reasons: poor career choice, dwindling jobs, plummeting wages. This meant I suddenly made a lot LESS money, and had to learn real fast how to live on around $12,000-$15,000 a year. When you have such a small window of ‘wealth’ to work with, every cent counts in a big way, and there is less room for error (or dumb choices), so I’ve been trying to absorb all the financial wisdom I can get.

So far, it’s helped. I’ve managed to stay out of debt, which is a very good thing, and to live a very frugal lifestyle. Now if I can just get that “increase my earning power” thing down.

Baker, I thought the tattoo thing was funny, too. You can find Caryn’s story in comment #57 on Brokamp’s original post. She really was motivated by getting an expensive tattoo. I think that’s great. But it is funny when stated like that.

I realized that I had no idea how many weeks of allowance it would cost to get a pet turtle.

For me, it was the “More of the Monkees” album. I counted how many Mallo Cups I would have to give up to be able to listen to “I’m a Believer” whenever I wanted and not just when the people at the radio station felt like playing it.

Better to be motivated to improve your finances by a future goal (tattoo) than by what you’ve already done (debt). At least it seems less painful (I am one of those motivated by debt people).
The tattoo comment surprised me, but then I realized, this person did what we should all be doing: ordering and using our finances to support and do that which we value in life.
I want to see a pic of this ‘life changing’ tattoo!

It all started at the age of 10 as well when I noticed that an expensive toy has different prices in different parts of town. So I kept riding my bike from one shop to another, in a voyage of discovery.

Frequently desires dissapeared with the introduction of new toys. Or wait.. , I can ask that for my birthday which is in a month and I can keep the pocketmoney for something else ! It’s enough to teach you self-discipline without realizing it.

Interesting post. I think the tattoo part falls in the category of being able to buy something that you really want (might be expensive) but not having to worry about the cost of it. It kind of falls in the materialism section; that’s why the percentage was so low.

The other categories seem to be deeper “must” reasons to why people want more money – I’m on my own, saw parents struggle, debt, etc. I also think the tattoo part was to add a little humor to the post too. Thanks for sharing this.

I made myself care about money because of what my mother had gone through to raise us up (me and my brother) without helps from my father, and because my mother had taught me well about how to live with little money in our hands.

I remembered we were very poor. My mother was a nurse and her salary was very small. My mother used her’s tiny stipend to pay for our school, clothes and rice. We grew water spinach and some other vegetables in the garden, raised chickens, ducks, rabbits and pigs for eggs and meat. Sometimes when we were lucky, we could sell some of our chickens or pigs for a little extra money. Many times all chickens and ducks got ill and all had died in just 2 or 3 days – we couldn’t do anything but burying them. Living like that made us think about how slow and hard it was to make money, and how fast money would go.

Later when our life was better, we had a little bit saving and we didn’t have to raise any chicken or grow any vegetables, my mother had taught me how to spend money. Every morning she gave me the same small amount of money enough for buying food for my family in one day (we didn’t really have electricity or a fridge at that time). My “duty” was to go to the local market and buy food so that we could eat in 3 healthy meals with some vegies and some meat, and didn’t have to eat the same thing every meal in a day. That was not easy at all.. sometimes my family had to eat clams soup for 3 days in a row because I couldn’t think of anything else to buy. However I had learn a lot about living well/healthy with small amount of money.

For now, my husband and I care about money for raising our children, helping our parents when needed, paying for our houses, once in a while traveling to foreign countries or to my origin country (I am from SE Asia). Those are some of our big items in the money-needed list. Our list of small items will need ages to fill in

I took a Personal Finance class as part of my MBA-Finance curriculum. I was suddenly making more money and didn’t know what to do with it. So I went for my MBA. Believe it or not, I was thousands of dollars in debt and it didn’t even occur to me that what I should do with the extra money was to pay off the debt. It didn’t occur to me until I fully understood compound interest. That class turned my life around.

Really? I remember my very first diary entry at age 6 started with ‘I have $22.98 saved.’ My father likes to say that I’ve always been able to make the buffalo burp. (i.e. squeeze a buffalo nickel so hard…)

What drives me to being financially responsible is always reminding myself of my goals and dreams. I realize that in order be able to attain those things I want I must, systematically, do x,y and z… just as so many before me have done.

It’s not money people care about it’s the ability and freedom to do the things they want and realize their lifetime dreams. Money is simply an enabler, its a medium which allows people to do the things they enjoy. For me its always cost/benefit analysis, if I don’t do x I can save this which allows me later to do y… and I would much rather do y than x. I think the key is primarily thinking long term, but at the same time if you do something great, reward yourself.

FinanceAnswers well said. You took the words straight out of my mouth.
What drives me financially is where I want to be in 5 to 10 years and what kind of life I want then.
I know that if I am not responsible now, I will not have the life I have always dreamed of. FREEDOM.

I’ve always been inspired by money’s powers because I grew up in many third world countries overseas due to my parents occupation. The dichotomy between the rich and poor in countries such as Malaysia and The Philippines is so egregious that I knew growing up I had to find a way out, even though I was never trapped to begin with.

It’s the brevity of life, and the people who disappear over time that provides every a-ha moment in my life. I don’t plan on messing it up!

After I finished university, I had a whole whack of debt – some of it for student loans, and some stupid consumer debt also. I moved out of my parents’ house really fast after I landed a job pretty quickly, and all my furniture went on a credit card. The job I got straight out of school just wasn’t for me… it was very crappy pay for work that did not suit my degree at all (it was being an executive assistant to a furniture company’s VP and doing a lot of high level customer service). I just wasn’t happy, but I continued to spend.

I was miserable and after a few months I managed to land a good job that paid better and actually related to my degree. I am still at that job. I had my real “awakening” (or whatever you want to call it) last October around the time I was hired. I realized that I am making good money, and I have nothing to show for it. At the time I was living with my boyfriend (we don’t live together anymore), and we fought about petty stuff like paying for groceries (yeah, he’s in debt too, but that’s another story). We could never travel anywhere. We couldn’t even afford to go out for dinner. Effectively, any money spent on wants would be going straight to debt… that’s the debt trap.

First, I tackled my $7,000 student loan (for my last year of studies) and managed to pay it off in 5 months. I’m working on my credit card debt and should have that paid off by March.

Ever since I realized that I wasn’t fooling anyone (including myself) and I was miserable with the weight of consumer debt on my back, I made an effort to cut spending, and really come up with a timeline to pay off debt. Instead of arbitrarily making credit card payments, and wondering why I was still in debt after always paying more than the minimum, I looked at my financial situation and lifestyle, and truly analyzed. I’m more determined than ever to get out of debt, and I got a part-time job to ensure it happens quickly. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

It took me a while for the extent of my debt to really sink in… I mean it’s nothing that with determination and a fairly decent salary I couldn’t/can’t pay off in a year or so, but it is scary having a NEGATIVE net worth. It’s depressing having to put most of a paycheck to debt. I’m just glad I realized that I’m heading nowhere before I got married, had kids, got a house, etc. It’s exciting to really control your finances. I want to eventually start my own company and the first order of business is to get my personal finances in order. How can I run something if I can’t even figure out my own life? I can’t wait to be debt free and start to save, save, save

For me, it was both seeing my parent’s “struggle” (I put in quotes because it was more the # of arguments they had about money than really struggling, as my dad is a chemist) as well as a craving for financial independence.

I am a senior in college so I have only been in the real world a few years, and many would say I haven’t yet stepped in the real world. I have become extremely concerned about money the past two years. I realized that money (really, purchasing power in a literal form) would give me more choices as to how I spend my time. I want to be able to do the things I want to do, and I realize that it takes money to have the option of doing that.

So I guess I have lots of things I want to do in the future, and I am not oblivous to the reality that I need money to do those things. So right now goal number one is to accumulate that money.

That is why I think personal finance blogs are great! Everyone who writes/comments on them seem to have the same mindset of concern about wealth. It can really stimulate ideas and keep me focused.

Specifically, many of the motivations are life changing events. I would guess that these aren’t the triggers for focusing on savings. They are simply the stained glass through which thoughts of savings are seen through. After months, years, decades of going from paycheck to paycheck, using credit, and the stress of thinking of money all the time, some people will discover a better way. When this happens, you naturally connect it with what is happening in your life. If you get a new dog, then finding money for it’s food/vet bills are what you will be thinking about when you think about having a financial buffer.

But what really causes it? It has something to do with maturity, and something to do with increased awareness. It’s similar to deciding to keep your kitchen clean, or quitting binge drinking, or driving safely. You might connect each of these changes with life changing events (such as child bearing) but they are just connected by proximity.

That’s my guess. I’d like to see more psychology of savings articles (maybe some coverage of peer reviewed scientific work?)

I disagree with the “no one is born frugal”. Some people pretty much are. It’s like those disgusting girls who are born to be thin and eat dessert in front of the rest of us until we all gang up and kick her butt.

I like money. Sure I learned skills and watched others struggle and it made an impression, but even if I didn’t I bet I would still be frugal because I like and respect money. People who abuse their money by tossing it away frustrate me. I don’t mean I’m greedly. I love other people’s money, too. I mean I love walking people through how to budget and save. My friends know I love talking about it and I’ll walk them through the variables of a mortgage or car loan because I enjoy throwing the numbers around.

I committed at 7 to save $50, had $1k by 14 and bought my first mutual fund which I sold out of at 18 for $3k, and I still have that money and am still adding every month (now that I work it’s a lot easier).

the reasons that made me care about money is that i was brought up by struggling parents and around financially struggling people. then i read a book that made me realize that i could choose the life that i wanted and it all depended on how i handled the little money(cannot emphasize the infinitesimal quantities involved) to build great wealth. ever since i have made it my goal to be free and this means having wealth surpassing the wealth of all the people that i know….put together!!! oh and i want a lamborghini

For me, it was since my childhood where my parents emphasized the importance of money. We werent deprived but did not spend lavishly on anything. We were allowed to indulge, eat out but not at the expense of debt. My parents would emphasize the importance of education for which they saved, depriving themselves of many things. I received numerous awards in Undergraduate and I majorly studied on scholarships. Even got into a Grad school with full funding.

I saved up atleast 10,000$ while in Grad school, bought a used car with a downpayment too. I got married and later on found out the enormous debt that my husband had (10,000$) which was revealed in May.
It was very difficult early on to accept this. But, both of us took this as a learning experience and we stumbled across GRS (while I googled how to eliminate debt). It was a complete makeover for us. Now, we have a budget, have a saving a/c, have an IRA and have paid down 7000$ of debt. Transfered the $3000 to a 0% balance and will pay that off within the next month.

I have always be conscientious of money, since we never had much while growing up. Its a different story with my husband. He never had any tough time in life hence he did not value money until that 10,000$ debt hit him hard. I am glad he learnt a lesson, albeit in a wrong way!

Duh! Just found this rather funny…. I’m hoping to go and get my next tattoo today! (They’re not cheap… Or, well, not something you want to skimp on for sure.) Totally something I would say, but I didn’t, sadly. I want so many tattoos that I can’t afford at all, and some that I want to do things to earn them and then get them since it’d be weird otherwise.

@31 — For me, it’s Ferrari all the way. It’s why I have my “Saving for my Ferrari” Sharebuilder account. Maybe I should screenshot that to show I’m not lying…

(1) So thrilled to see YOUR MONEY OR YOUR LIFE & THE TOTAL MONEY MAKEOVER impacted so many people. I recommend those two books constantly.

(2) Think you nailed it with your last statement: “It seems to me that having those goals always in mind is key to keeping your financial plan on track.” As someone who speaks often to women about personal finance I find this to be particularly true – having that clear vision of what your life will be like when you are living in financial nirvana…. really helps when life inevitably rears its head and forces you to make tough trade-offs.

Personally, my motivation for caring about money stemmed during my youth. I saw how rich people lived their life, handled their business. I had always been inspired by these people. I thought I could learn a thing or two about how they managed to accumulate wealth and even more about how they spend it wisely. I thought there must be some secret as to how they did it. If they could do it, why can’t I. My Well Of wealth

It started with me because I had to. Had to get out of debt that is. Then, I kind of tread water financially for a few years. Then I realized that I could take it to further and further levels, and I have just kept going.

I think it also stems from the desire to live a better life with less money. Meaning, not to be so stressed to the gills about climbing the corporate ladder to make more money. If I can get more out of what I do make, to me, that is a raise in and of itself.

I became serious about money after I realized that I was not doing great because I was ignorant and that there were ways to correct my ignorance. I started reading books, including Joe Dominguez’ “Your Money or Your Life” I have also read some Dave Ramsey and many others. Joe gave great advise, which I used. I retired 10 years later at 55.

For me, the money maturity came when I became pregnant with my son. We wanted to go from two people living on two salaries to three people on one. We made good money but our net worth was disastrously in the negatives. I remember the night when we finally sat down and created a spreadsheet of our monthly spending… we knew something had to change.

From paying off debt and returning to a frugal lifestyle, we’ve managed to free up $1200/mo. Now when people ask me when I’m going back to work, I can say, “I’m not.” I get to be home with my son & that means more to me than anything.

I started saving compulsively when I’d just moved to another country and was a bit broke (eating lentils and rice and nothing much else) because I found out I wasn’t getting paid as soon as I thought. And I started getting panic attacks.

My awakening hit me like a ton of bricks. I married into the active duty military lifestyle. After being a native Floridian for my entire life, we departed at the end of 2007 for the west coast. We have since moved one other time, still on the west coast. We had a home in FL, which like everything else had it’s value fall through the floor. We were unable to sell it. Meanwhile, the remote area we were moved to, I was unemployeed with a PhD in chemistry, $160k in student loans between myself and my PhD husband, and a home in FL worth only 60% of what we owed. WE did everything we could think of, I even worked fast food 40 hours a week to help pay the bills, but they caught up to us. We had no choice but to file for BK to get rid of the home since we had a first and second (both fixed). Meanwhile, the county we lived in raised property taxes considerably, and our payment went up $500 a month to help the county with shortfalls. It was an APEX of disaster, no job, big house with big payments, and within 18 months of leaving the place I lived my entire life, there was nothing left. This was completely and totally demoralizing. That was our dream home, on a few acres, we owned horses there. We didn’t necessarily live on a budget while in FL, but we did track our spending. We did have a savings acocunt when we left (which was totally liquidated to try and keep our house payments current while we sold it). The banks REFUSED an offer just 25k below what we owed a few months after leaving, then 12 months later got the house in foreclosure proceedings. Guess they should have taken that 25k hit when they could have because now they are about 100k in the hole without the costs associated with selling. LOL. It was at that moment, when I pleading with a stranger in India to let me sell my own house that I realized I had totally 100% lost control of my life. That I am crying on the phone to save my skin to a stranger who doesn’t even speak english as their first language, doesn’t even know where my county is on a map, or even give a dang that we were forced to move during the worst economic downturn since the great depression because Uncle Sam felt my husband was needed 3300 miles away. I hung up the phone that day, with a new renewed sense of purpose. After getting out of this mess, whatever means that was, I was never going to do this to myself again. After our bankruptcy was over, the foreclosure finalized, we turned things around. We paid off the car we had left within a few months. We still have a considerable student loan debt, but we are chipping away at it. We rent a decent home, live within a budget, and have a 5 year plan to get rid of student loan debt. We are scheduled to move every 2 years, so our budget includes monthly set asides for those expenses. Hopefully our next duty station I can start using my considerable degree experiene in pharmaceutical research and increase my earning power to really get those student loans gone. Then after that, we will continue to park money into income producing assets. Once our student loans are paid off, we hope to retire 10 years after that date, live off our asset’s interest, and travel on the cheap for a few years. After that we will settle down and buy a home (for cash), and start the next adventure in our life (whatever that may be). I will never again beg a total stranger on the phone to help me with my financial problems. (because realistically that is what they were). That was my rock bottom, and I will never ever go there again.

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