5 Household Chemicals You Can Vape in a Pinch (And Probably Not Die)

Bro – is your vape pen empty, bro? Did you forget to go to the vape shop and stock up on E-juice? Did you let your vape sub expire thinking you had enough time to check out the new stocks down at Vape Rock every Friday night on the way home from work only you totally forgot to do that and now you’re staring down an evening without dry herb or waxes?

Fear not, brotato-chip, because we’ve got your back. Check out these 5 household chemicals you can vape in a pinch (and probably not die)

1. Glade Plug-Ins

Pull that Glade Natural Orange Mist dispenser out of the wall, stab it open with a fork, and drip that juice into your pen for a quick and easy way out of actually getting off of your ass and buying E-juice like a normal person. Is there really any difference between that air freshener shit spraying every 10 minutes and you mainlining it into your lungs? Probably not, but don’t ask us, man – we’re not doctors.

2. Sierra Mist

Hey look, this has ‘mist’ in the name too, so obviously it’s totally cool to vape. Plus there’s caffeinated Sierra Mist too, right? Who fucking cares?! You’ve got a 12-pack of carbonated bad ideas to see you through the night.

3. White-Out

If you survived sniffing it in 5th grade, then you definitelyprobably maybe won’t suffer any permanent brain damage vaping it as an adult.

4. Potpourri

Technically not a liquid, but you did get that juicer for Christmas, and now is as good of a time as any to break it out of the box and see what happens when you place a non-food item in it, hit the button, and then inhale it directly into your body #nothingbad.

5. Grape-Scented Magic Markers

Most likely safer than White-Out, certainly tastier than a cherry-scented marker, but not easy to explain to your daughter why her book-bag was dumped out on the floor of the kitchen beside your unconscious, purple-lipped body the next morning.