Picky Readers

Ahh, time for the holidays…and vast amounts of traditional foods. Everyone in my family always looks forward to the staples of casseroles, soups and meats this time of year. Everyone that is…except for me! I’m a picky eater. I’ve always been a picky eater.

My mom tried all the tricks on me when I was growing up. She tried the close your eyes, here comes the plane trick. My mouth closed faster than the speed of light. She tried hiding vegetables in meals. My x-ray vision would find them before my fork became contaminated. She even tried the ‘ol you’ll never leave the dinner table trick. My little sister grew bored playing all by herself and finished my plate so we could play. If Jen didn’t do that, I’d probably still be there!

My eating habits have improved since I got married. My husband no longer has to hide the ingredients in the trash before he serves dinner. Although, he would still prefer that I take a spoonful of everything passed on Thanksgiving and actually clean my plate. We both know that it’s never going to happen!

If you have a picky eater at home, you’ll enjoy these stories to share. Or, if you’re like me and want to relive your picky eating experiences, you’ll laugh out loud throughout these stories:

These characters go against nature when they don’t eat what they should. How can Gregory not eat garbage?! It’s the staple of every goat’s diet in Gregory, the Terrible Eater (JP SHA). Did you know that peas are supposed to eat candy to taste so good? Neither did I! But Little Pea (JP ROS) can’t have spinach for dessert until she finishes her candy for dinner. And, did you know Rabbit’s secret food enemy is…yep, you guessed it! Carrots! How can Rabbit not like carrots (Rabbit Food (JP GRE))?

I Will Never Not Ever Eat a Tomato (JP CHI) Lola won’t eat anything until Charlie convinces her that mashed potatoes are clouds puffs and carrots are “twiglets” from Jupiter. My mom tried these tricks. I saw right through them! I didn’t care if the New Kids on the Block ate vegetables. Jordan Knight could have come into my kitchen and prepared my veggies for me. There was still no way I was going to eat them!

Now I Will Never Leave the Dinner Table (JP MAR) Patty Jane is forced to stay at the dinner table until she has swallowed a piece of spinach. She imagines herself a “woman with children of her own” still sitting at the dinner table trying to choke down a mouthful of spinach. (My battle was with lettuce, not spinach.) She didn’t have a little sister like mine to help her with the war.

Eat Your Peas (JP GRA) Daisy’s mom tries bribery to make her eat her peas. Even my mom tried this one. She didn’t offer me a chocolate factory like Daisy’s mom, but she did offer me limitless amounts of dessert. But I was as stubborn as Daisy and wouldn’t fold. I didn’t taste chocolate ice cream throughout my seventh year of existence. I also wasn’t as clever as Daisy, though. She finds her mom’s weakness and offers her the same bribe to eat her arch enemy…Brussels sprouts!

What food will you avoid throughout this holiday season?

Lisa Shaia is the children’s librarian who will be eating macaroni and cheese for Thanksgiving…and Christmas…and New Year’s Eve…

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2 thoughts on “Picky Readers”

JERRY: Hold it, Newman, you wouldn’t eat broccoli if it was deep fried in chocolate sauce.
NEWMAN: I love broccoli, its good for you.
JERRY: Really? Then maybe you’d like to have a piece?
(Jerry opens container. Newman takes a piece)
NEWMAN: Gladly.
(Newman spits it out)
NEWMAN: Vile weed!