Silent Children are Up to No Good and 30 Other Parenting Truths

Silent children are up to no good, almost always making a giant mess somewhere.

Other people probably don’t find your children and their shenanigans quite as cute as you do.

You are the parent; act like it! Raise a kid that other people want to be around. (from Jacqueline)

Children never nap long enough. Or children nap too long and then stay up half the night.

You will pick up the same toys over and over, every day, and every time, you will think, “Why can’t they put their toys away when they’re finished with them!?” and vow to put them in toy jail next time.

You could clean the space in which your children play five times a day, and it will look like you haven’t cleaned for days as soon as you turn your back.

You will have to call Poison Control and/or an ambulance before your kids grow up.

Toddlers make messes by breathing.

You are going to forget something every single time you leave the house. Hopefully, it’s not one of your children.

Some children stuff things up their noses and into their ears. Yours is probably one of them.

Even good mothers bribe their children with goodies when they’re out in public.

Running water does not mean hands are being washed (or teeth being brushed).

There is no quiet in a restaurant like children enchanted by an iPad.

The things your children can do for themselves, they will want you to do for them. The things they do badly for themselves, they will insist on doing for themselves.

You will clean pee and/or poop from your carpet before your kids are potty trained.

You’re not a bad mom if you occasionally turn on the television when your children are fighting, overtired, or just need to be busy and out of trouble for ten minutes.

Many days will pass, and you may forget the last time you showered.

You will always worry about whether or not you have what it takes to be the mom they need. (from Brooke)

Your kids will wear whatever they want. It’s more important for them to feel confident and like themselves than it is for them to match or for you to not be embarrassed. (from Connie)

Sleep is more important than anything. Do whatever it takes for the people in your house to get as much sleep as possible. (from Amanda)

I disagree with only one, if I hear a big crash upstairs (with or without crying)I’m going up there! You never know if they have pulled something down on themselves and maybe they can’t cry! Always check on your kids when their safety is at risk!