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March 18, 2014

10 harsh truths that will make you a better blogger

Last month we took a look at 30 tips that will help you succeed as a new blogger, and today I'd like to delve into a related topic. It’s one that might be seen as the less glamorous side of blogging, but which most bloggers, especially those whose sites develop even a moderate degree of success are likely to encounter, or need to be aware of, as their life on the blogging front advances.

These points have been swirling around in my head for quite some time, and there have been moments when I've almost written a post devotedly solely to each, but haven’t as of yet, ultimately because the gist of each can be covered in an a small number of paragraphs.

I'm not delving into these topics today to scare anyone away from blogging or to create undo stress, quite the opposite actually. By being aware that you might run into these kinds of scenarios, you'll likely find yourself in a better position to tackle them if they do arise. Not all of the following are wholly negative, but they're not necessarily what I'd consider to be the most gloriously enjoyable elements of blogging either. They’re real life, plain and simple.

1.Just because you created a blog, it doesn't mean you've pulled an audience out of thin air: We discussed this topic in last month's post, but it's worth chatting about a little further here, because it's really something that I receive a lot of comments about from both new and longstanding blogs alike. Unless you're bringing an audience with you from elsewhere, have some degree of notoriety online or off, are doing something absolutely groundbreaking, or just happen to luck out bigger than if you found that elusive pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, chances are you're not going to amass an audience, let alone a big one, over night.

Growing your audience and creating a devoted group of return readers, takes work and time. Lots of time, and you have to be willing to put in the legwork required to, at the very least, get the ball rolling there. Three of the best ways to do that are to be an active blogging community member and commenter (on other peoples' sites), post quality content on a regular basis, and guest blogging on another (established) site. For various reasons, I've never done much in the way of that last one personally, but I've seen it work wonders for many folks who were just starting out or who were looking to expand their readership.

2.Chances are, you are your own harshest critic: And you already know it, even if you haven't admitted as much to yourself. Stop trying to constantly compare yourself to other bloggers and their sites, especially ones who have been around for years already. Take inspiration from them, sure, but don't feel like you're a failure because you're not emulating them and their success entirely. Chances are, at least part of the reason why they're successful is because they blazed their own path, and so should you.

Instead of criticizing and beating yourself up. Write a post, write two posts, heck, you're on a roll, write five posts today. Work hard, be dedicated, and create the kind of quality, engaging, informative, helpful, interesting, awesome and/or beautiful content that you'd be happy to read on someone else's site and chances are people will quickly start coming to your blog to do just that themselves.

3.You will get negative comments. And spam, and perhaps even hate mail. Yep, all of these stand to crop up sometimes amongst the bevy of (hopefully!) thoroughly positive, kind, friendly comments that you receive. Don't take it personally. Quite often there's an anonymous online troll behind them who's aim is simply to get you riled up. Don't give them the satisfaction. If a negative comment comes in by way of a legitimate blog reader, it's up to you if you want to approve and/or reply to it, but whatever the case may be, again, don't let it get into your head.

Not everyone is going to agree with everything that you write, your views on certain topics, the way in which you live your life, like you or your site, and so on. That's okay. It's their problem, not yours.

Occasionally harsh comments can even help us discover something about ourselves or our blog, or otherwise change our mindset in a positive way. This doesn't happen all the time, but it can, and it's a good example of hunting down a silver lining in the midst of a negative experience.

4.There will be times when the last thing on the face of the planet that you feel like doing is blogging. It doesn't matter how much you're wild about blogging, pretty much no one brings their A-game all the time or feels like they could write a killer post every second of every day. Life is so much more than what we do online (or at least, it should be), and sometimes there are reasons stemming from the offline (or the online, too) world that have lead us to a moment (or a week, etc) where we just aren't in the blogging zone. If your blogging mojo is a funk, you may find the seven tips in this post from 2012 to be helpful.

Don't force it. In all likelihood, the desire and drive to write again will be back before you know it. Get out, enjoy your day, go inspiration hunting, throw a dinner party, take your best friend thrift store shopping, whatever you're heart desires. Unless you're working on some kind of time sensitive deadline, chances are, you don't truly have to write that day, so why force what doesn't want to come?

5.You will frequently, if not, on a daily basis have people emailing you asking you to promote their brand/company/product/site/band/indie film/photography exposition/startup/etc for free. I'm all for helping people out, I really am, but just because someone asks you to promote something for you, doesn't mean that you have to, especially if they're not happily offering to compensate you in some respect (money, free products, promoting your site in turn, etc) up front from the get go.

As your blog grows in popularity, you will likely encounter more and more of these kinds of requests, many of which are complete and utter boilerplate that the company (or what have you) is sending out to hundreds, if not not thousands of bloggers, in the hopes that they'll get at least a few who will give them completely free publicity.

One surefire way to recognize this kind of message is when it arrives and doesn't address you by your first name, or it addresses you by the name of your blog, though certainly boilerplate can include your real name, too. If it starts out with generic statements like, "Hey, I really like your site and think you've written some great posts there!", chances are, the sender is attempting to flatter you with insincere compliments in the hopes that you'll feel more favourably about them and their request.

Bloggers are professional people in their own right, not free billboards, and though, especially when you're just starting out, it can be tempting to say yes to every such request that comes your way, please remember to keep your time and integrity in mind and to only do pro bono work on behalf of total strangers when you really and truly want to, not simply because you were asked.

If you're thinking about working on behalf of someone else in this capacity, don't be shy to ask outright for some form of compensation that you'd be satisfied with. You wouldn't expect a doctor, lawyer, teacher, engineer, wedding planner, computer programmer, or any other professional to work for free, just because they were sent an email request to do so. Why should successful bloggers be viewed or treated any differently?

6.Sometimes you really, really need to step back and take a breather. I don't mean a break from blogging (aka, a blogcation) per se, no, in this instance, I'm talking about those times when someone does and/or says something that instant gets your blood boiling, hurts your feelings, insults or otherwise upsets you. Even if you're the most easy going person in the world, you loath "getting into it" with people, and you try to keep a calm temper and level head as much as possible, there will be times when it takes every last drop of willpower you have in you not to launch a strongly worded, to put it mildly, reply off in the face of the heightened emotions that you're experiencing.

There may be instances when doing so is more than warranted and worth going ahead with, but other times, it's best to stop, pause, regroup your thoughts, possibly discuss the situation with an impartial third party, and wait a little while before you reply, if you opt to at all.

Every once in a blue moon when I find myself in this kind of spot, I'll write my reply (say, in a private Word doc) and never send it. Just getting my side of how I truly feel about the situation down on virtual paper can often be all it takes to ensure that level heads prevail and that whatever the issue is, it doesn't risk growing out of proportion needlessly. ("Sleeping on" your reply, aka, waiting a day or two to respond, can also often help tremendously in this regard.)

7.People will rip your work off: Blogging may not be the same thing as designing a product, painting a masterpiece, writing a song, or pioneering a new idea, but that doesn't mean that strangers, fellow bloggers, and sometimes even friends, won't blatantly copy your idea for a post. Sometimes, this can be a great thing, especially if they start out by giving credit (and linking) to you and your blog, and explaining that their post was inspired by your work.

Other times however, it will sting and unless someone has actually lifted your writing (instead of just your post idea), which falls into copyright infringement territory, chances are, there will be nothing (positive) that you can do about it. As much as it can feel like a slap in the face when you see this happen, just take a deep breath and remind yourself that sometimes imitation is, as the old saying goes, the greatest form of flattery.

8.It's really, really, really hard to earn a livable wage from blogging: Now granted, you may have zero desire or plans to do so, but if you are, you need to be painfully realistic with yourself and to approach the way in which you blog from a very professional mindset. Are there people makes a living, even a great living, just from blogging? You bet, but for every Darren Rowse out there, there are thousands, if not millions, who are earning little to nothing from their blogging efforts.

If you choose to use your blog to help grow, or be your whole, income, don't go into things blindly or with the belief that everything will just magically fall into place, that money will rain down on your lovely little blog from the heavens, and that you'll soon be off traveling the world and blogging from posh hotel rooms. I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but that's the kind of financial success exceedingly few bloggers ever get anywhere near achieving, and which (again) many have zero desire to aim for.

Whether you blog as a way of generating income or not, building an excellent site that engages readers, consistantly sees a bigger audience, and which people are apt to talk about, takes - as we've discussed above - a really substantial amount of time, effort, and love for what you're doing. Start down the path with those three things in check and chances are you'll be able to find ways - such as paid blog sponsors, affiliate programs, text link ads, and Amazon Associates - to monetize your blog and reward yourself financially for the diligent effort that you're putting into your site day in and day out.

9.You will make mistakes and regret certain things: From hideous templates to having music blaring on your sidebar to posting about things that, ultimately, you may wish you hadn't, along the way you'll make some mistakes. It's not the end of the world, and no one is expecting you to be perfect. Take stock of what you wish you could have done differently, and then either make those changes or try not repeat your mistakes a second time.

When I look back over nearly five years of Chronically Vintage's life, something that teeters on being a regrettable mistake for me was a year long project that I launched in 2011 called Vintage 365, which consisted of me putting up a brand new post everyday. This side of things, though not the easiest walk in the park, isn't what I regret. The mistake that I made was to undertake this twelve month project at a time when my health was, at best, allowing me to be on the computer for perhaps a combined total or an hour most days. Because that hour went to writing the next day's post, I wasn't able to stay as active in the blogging community nor to comment on other peoples' sites very often, and as a result, few of all those posts throughout the year received the kind of reaction from my readers that I'd grown accustomed to in the two years of vintage blogging I'd enjoyed before it.

If I could back in time to January 1, 2011, would I launch this project again? No, not if my health was in the same spot, not by a long shot. I tried something new, I wrote a lot of posts (many of which I loved creating at the time), I challenged myself and I saw that project through the end. It might not have gone as ideally as possible, but it wasn't a complete train wreck either, and I learned a lot of valuable lessons about blogging (including how fleeting large audiences can be) that have served me wonderfully ever since (so in that respect, maybe it was worthwhile after all).

10.Sometimes you need to step outside of your comfort zone: I don't mean that you need to pose naked on camera, take up skydiving, or start breeding poisonous snakes - though you're more than welcome to, if you so feel inclined. No, what I mean is that sometimes if it can be easy, all too easy, to fall into a rut of posting the same old, same old kind of comfy, cozy posts. They may be great, but even the best dessert becomes a bit boring if you eat it everyday.

If you know what kinds of posts work well for you, that's awesome - you're honestly a big step ahead of some of your fellow blogging peers - but don't let a successful formula risk being your undoing. Every now and then, post about something new, unique or just plain silly, even if doing so feels a bit strange or tricky, and get people talking! (Some of my more off-the-wall posts over the years have been devoted to topics as diverse as 5 items I would never wear, Jane Austen's Fight Club, and Bigfoot).

{Just like buildings muscles, successful blogging requires knowledge, time, effort, and dedication. It isn't always a bed of roses and sometimes one faces less-than-ideal situations and harsh truths, but chances are you'll be able to tackle these challenges head on and ultimately flourish because of, not in spite of, them. Image source.}

♥ ♥ ♥

I love blogging. Not a little, not moderately, but rather entirely. I flat out love it from the very depth of my soul. Blogging, especially if you're a highly active blogger, can be akin to, if not your actual, full time job and just as with any career choice or interest that you devote yourself to extensively, there are going to be bumps in the road, people who upset or annoy you, sticky situations, and stressful moments here and there. This is normal. Very normal. Blogging, like life, is not all sunshine and lollipops and companies wanting to give you free products to review 24/7. Nor should it be.

A little adversity, problem solving, and working on how best to handle those kinds of people who really get under your skin builds character and makes you not only a better person, but a better blogger. I'm not suggesting you go out of your way to incite problems for yourself, goodness, no! Instead, that when issues does arise, try to keep in mind that in every negative, there is a takeaway lessen to a learn which can help you handle the same kind of scenario in an even more positive, knowledgeable and confident manner the next time around (because, and here's another honest truth, for you, chances are there will be a next time).

Ideally, you want blogging to be a fun, rewarding, happy, and at times, enjoyably challenging, experience and process. You've heard me say it many times before, but I'll say it again: If you frequently find that you don't like/are highly stressed out by/no longer enjoy blogging, it's time to do a bit of soul searching and perhaps a 180 on your site. Not every blog is destined to succeed, flourish, or last forever, plain and simple.

There may be circumstances in your life which need to take prescience over blogging or which consume so much of your time that you're not able to devote yourself to your site as much as you'd like to. That's okay. Really, it is. You tried, you likely had a good time for a while, you probably learned a number of interesting and valuable things, and you've got some terrific memories to look back on (plus, there's nothing to stop you from blogging again in the future; remember, the moment does equate to eternity).

Even if your blog contributes to some, or all, of your livelihood, it shouldn't feel painful, overly monotonous, tedious or like something you've come to dread. There's no way you're going to give yourself, or your readers, your best writing if it does. Revamp your site, shake things up, get creative, enlist the help of friends, be honest with yourself and your readers, and start making the changes you need so that the joy and sense of wonder that blogging can impart find their way back into your life.

Not everyone who blogs will run into all of these scenarios, but again, if your blog is starting to become well know, highly trafficked, and/or publicized, chances are that you'll face at least a few of them (plus others that we didn't even touch on here). Try not to worry about them. At the end of the day, you want to ensure that you're blogging for yourself first and foremost, that you're happy, and that you're having a blast.

Be true to yourself, stand your ground when truly needed, make peace with the fact that not everyone will "get", like, or necessarily even be nice to you, and don't be afraid to just roll with the punches. As the old axiom says, you can't please all of the people all of the time, so don't even try.

To thine own self - and thine own blog - be true and you will most likely find that you have what it takes to handle and overcome those inevitable rough patches you’ll find yourself staring into the eyes of every now and then.

70 comments:

A truly brilliant and useful post Jessica, it means a lot that such a successful blogger as yourself is willing to share advice that has got you to wear you are today! I also liked that you touched on a subject that most bloggers who do posts like this don't mention - all of the spam emails that go around - I thought it was just me getting emails about promoting strange and dodgy stuff :P

Thank you deeply, sweet Harlow. It's my pleasure to share my wisdom - including those things that I've learned not to do - with my readers and dear online friends. What is the point of hoarding knowledge? I've never seen it and love sharing and helping others however I can based on what I know and can teach, especially when it comes to topics (like vintage and blogging) that are such integral parts of my own daily life.

Wisdom borne from experience. Every one of this points is sound. Like you, I'm immersed in blogging, so I've learned the same lessons over the course of years. Your explanation of them, in a single post like this, is invaluable. I wish I'd read it years ago.

Thank you very much, Ally. That is precisely what I'm hoping this post will do - help aid those who are new to blogging or looking to up their blogging game further, as well as everyone, veteran bloggers like ourselves, included know that there are certain things that can really make a powerful difference in their online experiences.

Great job with this post--there are certainly harsh truths involved in blogging, but if you love blogging, it's worth it! The negative comments can be extremely surprising when you first start out--I was mostly shocked because I don't tend to be a very offensive type of person, so I was surprised! But they become a little less shocking as time goes on. And I feel like I always get my best blog post ideas the minute I take a couple days away from the computer. Also, I love throwing a wacky or otherwise "curveball" type post out to my readers once in a while, it's fun!

Thank you very much, dear Rachel. So true! Now granted, knock wood, I don't get a lot of negative comments or emails, but I don't consider myself to be an offensive person to most peoples' sensibilities in the slightest, so when mean/rude/hurtful/etc comments do pop up, they're almost always from true online "trolls", not fellow bloggers or readers. Very true. One does build up a thick skin quickly, especially when you stop and realize, they're just words from strangers. They have no real sway or power over your life and your mood, and if you give them such, then the troll (or other hurtful type of person) has really and truly accomplished what they most likely set out to do in the first place.

I enjoyed reading this post. It is very helpful. I love blogging and someday, when my home life is not so busy, I hope to have a blog like yours, something special, inspiring, and unique. I realize it takes a lot of dedication and time, both of which I don't have right now. In the meantime, I look to blogs such as this to learn how real blogging is done.

Five years is a long time. I love to see you grow in readers and hope for your continued success.

You're very welcome, dear Gina, I'm happy to know that this post struck a chord with you (point #5 very much included - it's one I've been itching to write about for a long, long time now). If you ever have any blogging related questions not covered in this post, last month's, or others on the topic I've written here, please don't hesitate to ask. I'm always happy to help however possible on that front.

Well put! And for all that you called them harsh truths, I think that these were very simply and nicely stated. I hope you haven't gotten much hatemail! It's distressing how many people just love to rain on a lovely parade.

Looking forward to seeing more spring-like outfits! (How's the weather where you are? In Boston, we just got another weekend/week of highs in the 20s. Booo!)

Hi Tegan, thank you very much for your great comment. It truly a shame when people feel the need to rain on someone's parad, be rude just to elicit a response, or say something cruel out of spite or jealousy. Thankfully one doesn't encounter a great deal of that online in our vintage loving circle, but being a member of said community is not a shield unto itself and such can still happen, whether from inside or outside of it. Thankfully, for every negative comment (and person!), there are countless friendly, kind, lovely people who would never intentionally say anything that seemed cruel and/or blatantly rude.

Up until a few days, it was winter, winter and, oh look, more winter, here, but thankfully we've been getting a bit of sun and rain as of late, so hopefully it won't be too much longer now before I can dust off the ol' spring/summer threads (I've got some pieces that I purchased on trip to Calgary last September that I've been yearning to sport on camera ever since and will be highlighting in outfit posts this year).

I can recall how absolutely OVER THE MOON I was when I had finally reached 7 blog followers! Luckily, the negative comments have been few and far between. And those so outrageously rude I tend to strike from the record. Work, my goodness YES! Through picture stealing I became a Pintrest sensation! imagine my awe when i found that someone had pinned a picture of my Pyrex collection from my blog, and it had in turn been re-pinned 180 times...Wow. The first year I started I tried having posts every day. (Ha Ha) eventually i fell into a pattern of three times a weeks (and some times on Saturdays) which even now is fortunate if I meet my three post quota a week. I have often wondered if my post were becoming stale, comments would drop off, but the views would still be high. So every once in a while I do a post asking my readers what they would like to see more or less of. (The reader feedback really helps!) I have come to adore our blogging friends, people whom I provably would never have encountered or met other wise. It's nice to come home and see what everyone is up to, while also being able to go out and have adventures of my own. I am so very glad that people actually stop in and come to visit "Mick's" and really have an interest in what we do at our beloved Casablanca! As long as people keep viewing and commenting I will keep writing, not only for them but for myself!

That's awesome, Mick, and truly the number one reason, IMO, to blog in the first place. It's not selfish, quite the opposite actually. When you write what makes you happy or that you want to tell the world (of course the two can be one in the same), you stand the best chance of creating content that resonates deeply with your audience and keeps them coming back for me. I always enjoy your posts immensely and am sure that many, many others do as well. They're fun, witty, engaging, bursting with fab photos, and chalked full of plenty of vintage awesomeness. What's not to adore?

Wow, so much truth in all of your points! I have been blogging for over four years now and I still don't have as large of a readership as some of the blogs that have popped up within the last year. I don't really mind though because the part I love is shopping/picking out outfits and journaling them for future reference. I'm not so great at the networking side of things, which I feel is the most difficult part. Thank you for sharing your knowledge and experience, it is appreciated!

Hello Jessica, how are you? Nice to meet you'm Cris Cris Mix blog. Retro State of Parana - Brazil. Sorry my english is not very good. But you can understand, I think ... I want to thank you for the excellent post, will help me a lot because my blog is new. I do not have many visits, I want my blog to become more known. I'm 35 I'm starting in vintage style, your tips are very useful. Come visit my blog, if you follow me I will be grateful. Accepted tips and reviews. Kisses, Cris.

i really enjoyed that post so much, because it is so honest and realistic, i mean i don´t pretend to dream of living from blogging but it was really a lot of work and patience needed for me to get an actual audience who is interested in what i´m blogging ;) and sometimes you really just don´t feel like blogging, i found that out this month as i challenged myself for doing daily posts and even if it only consists in outfit posts it´s nothing you do just in 5 minutes, and then sometimes you get negative or rude comments which is not motivating at but on the other side blogging is so much fun for me and like i´m a girl from a small town it´s so great to get to know to people who are as obsessed with fashion as i ;)wish you a great week ahead!love and kisses,mary

Blogging...the Dark Side *wheeze, puff* (OK, so the *wheeze, puff* was my sad attempt at "typing" what Darth Vader would have sounded like there - never said I was good at this! *lol*)

All very good points to guide us newbies entering the fray - or thinking about it. I never kid myself, though, I figure that my own blog is just my personal ramblings (peppered with promises of pics, ahem...) that may or may not interest people. Either way, I'm just in it for the fun and the arrogance of sharing my thoughts with the multitudes who always agree with me. *winks* And a more private venue (did I just call a blog "private"? *LOL*) to share stuff with various relatives and friends than something like facebook. Personally speaking, that is.

Thank you bunches for this educational post! And enjoy some of that Spring for me, eh? ;)

That's awesome! If you're blogging for the fun of it and because it makes you happy, I sincerely believe that you're in it for two of the best possible reasons. Not every blog in the world needs to be hugely popular or a household name (and I'm not claiming that mine is - don't get me wrong there). What it "needs" to be, is whatever works best for your lives, dreams and long term goal for your site (the latter of which, in particular, may change as time goes on and the other two take you in various directions). If you're got that covered, you're a successful blogger, plain and simple (success is not, by any stretch of the imagination, only defined by the number of comments you receive on your posts).

Great post, Jess.Pity to anyone who passes your blog by because they think its just another vintage fashion blog. For it is so much more!You're so very good at writing and interacting with others and adding just the right photos to your posts.Eternal thanks for this post. I gleaned many gems of knowledge and ideas from it.I know its quite inadequate but, keep up the good work :)

P.S. Thank you so much for reading and commenting on my blog, i always love to hear what you have to say, it means a lot!\

Thank you very much, sweet Abigail, that is high praise indeed. It's funny in a way, you know, this blog was founded in April 2009 and between then and early spring 2012, wardrobe posts were not common here at all (for a variety of reasons), so while I certainly wrote about fashion related topics, it wasn't as big of a focus as it became when outfit posts started appearing here frequently. I love fashion and plan to always cover it, but it certainly isn't the sole purpose of this blog by any means. I'm too massively eclectic to focus just on one topic all the time! :)

You're very welcome for the visits and comments. Many heartfelt thanks in turn for yours.

I get a few of those 'oh I LOVE reading your blog so much promote my product' type emails and 99.9% of the time it's for a product or offer that is U.S based only. Sometimes I get urked and reply along the lines of though you say you love reading my blog so much, you have somehow managed to completely miss the fact I LIVE IN THE U.K!! Muppets. I did get suckered into doing a guest post early on. It was meant to be about image being important when you have cancer so I thought yes I'll go with this. It was a really rather badly written rambling post but I put it up anyway only to have the woman email me a couple of weeks later to ask had I had time to put up her post? Clearly she hadn't even bothered to check. Lesson learned there.

It's so generous of you to post these 'blogger tips' list. Especially since starting my own sewing blog, I've realised how much work goes into creating a truly professional looking blog with great content and photographs (none of which I can claim for mine - as you know I blog just for fun and to chat to other sewers and online friends). One day maybe I will polish mine - or one day I might stop, as you say, who knows? But in the meantime I will bear in mind these points. Some of them are very timely so thank you x

Thank you very much, dear Philippa. It's my sincere and very heartfelt pleasure. I am huge on sharing knowledge and helping others succeed at their job, craft, or any other positive area of their life and since blogging is such a huge part of mine, it only seems natural to me to cover that very topic here every now and then in the hopes that doing so will prove useful for others.

I greatly enjoy your blog and the topics you cover. So long as it's open for business, so to speak, I'll be a loyal reader and fan!

This was great. I've been blogging for years and my blog has gone through one identity crisis after another but I feel like I've found my voice, finally, and it's okay that it took time to get there. This was so wise and gave me some great advice, thanks so much.

This is wonderful, Jessica! Really fabulous reminders and insight. It IS hard work to blog, I'm finding out, and it has been a tough/rewarding process of learning and growth. I'm currently in the stage of wanting to revamp my blog, but I don't have enough time to do it right now, so I'm holding off until around June when I think life will leave me more free time to dedicate to a blog (and Etsy shop!) overhaul. I think it will do wonders for my creativity and rededication to blogging, which I really do love, but it's becoming more difficult for me to think of new ideas. I can't wait to revamp, improve my post content, and get things rolling!By the way, you and your blog has really been a great inspiration to me. You've helped me see what "blog etiquette" is about (because I wasn't very involved in the blogosphere before I started my own, so I wasn't sure about these things), shown me that it's best to be real and honest about myself and at times my struggles, how to have engaging post content, and keeping things fresh and thoughtful. Probably unknowingly, you've been one of my best blogging mentors! :)

Another killer post!! Number one hit home for me. I wanted so many readers in my first few years of blogging, but it has taken me 6 to get over 200. I've since let that go. I am happy with the fabulous people that visit my blog and don't worry about that followers number. That's actually the last reason I blog - to gain a following. I blog to share my passion for vintage and post about goings on in my life. And when I let go of that followers number, what do you know - people started to follow. lol!

Thank you Dear Jessica, I so appreciate the time you took to share your knowledge. This is a very informative post and so may of your points hit home for me. Thank you for sharing your wisdom. You are as always an inspiration. Gentle hugs my dear friend, Beverly

Thank you for this post, Jessica. I especially appreciated your advice about sponsored posts and free publicity for companies. I haven't yet done anything like that, though I have had offers from some very strange places. I am not opposed to doing this if the right situation comes along, but at first I was unsure about what to do because it seemed so flattering to have any offer at all! I'm glad I've held out, though. I am not in this to make money, necessarily, but it would be a nice benefit if it happened someday. I also appreciate your advice about criticism and negative comments. I have only had a few, and they stung at the time, but you're absolutely right about how to deal with them. Thanks again for your helpful tips.

A very informative post! There are a lot of points that you made that I have pondering lately. I would like to do this professionally at some point, though I have a long way to go until then, ha! I am not however looking to make a ton of money. For me it is more about doing something I love that is flexible enough for me to earn a little while staying on my children's schedule. My number one goal since before I can remember was to be a mother, and for me that is my first priority. I do not however want it to be my entire life. I want to exist outside of my children. I want to live for myself as well. I just want to do it in such a way that if they are sick I can stay home with them, or if school is a half day, I am available to them... Blogging and Etsy and the online world offer that potential. Will I make it? I don't know. I might and I might not. That is OK with me, because for now I am having fun and I am there for my family even if I am not making any money. Right now that is OK. Tomorrow is another day and I will worry about it then. Thank you for sharing so much truth with us. These are the types of things that no one really talks about, but they really matter.

Thank you for such an informative post Jessica. I struggle constantly with blogging, feeling most of the time that I don't have anything to offer, but I enjoy doing it anyway so keep going. I don't ever expect my readers to reach dizzying heights, I seem to have been where I am now forever!xxx

It is my sincere pleasure, sweet Melanie, thank you very much in turn for your lovely comment. I think that your blog is an absolute delight! I love your music themed/related posts, your outfits, your pets, everything and have never felt your topics were lacking in terms of what they amply offered readers. Keep up the marvelous work!

This is the "ugly" truth every first-time blogger needs to read.Why?Because a rude awakening from a pinky dream of a perfect blogoshpere is a "must" if one is planning to make a contribution to this lovely online world of ours.With no intention to sound like a Grudge, I'm the first one to claim: the blog should be one's venting place. That is the place for you to vent your imagination, your fashion moments, your dreams. The greater the need to vent, the greater the blog.Good thing about vintage blogging is this amazing community that is out there, they are supportive, and they are understanding; they know what it's like to be permanently "stuck in the past".Sure, I get down, and tired, overflown with my day job..But, blogging is fun. That is why we do it.

Thank you so tremendously much, dear Shauna. That means a great deal to me. I adore (!) your marvelous blog as well. It is teaming with style, elegance, engaging images and lovely writing. My eyes always light up when I see a new post from you appear in my feeds.

Oh I am so thankful to be reading this post today and also reading all of the comments. What a tremendous help and inspiration you. For the months I removed myself from blogging to grieve the loss of my father I didnt feel "up to" putting in the work required to do even one post, let alone a bunch of them. And even now there are still days that my heart is not in it. My actual income making job has become very stressful of late and throwing that on top of the loss of my father has really taken a toll on me. So it is so nice to hear that its ok not to force it, to be who I am, and enjoy what I write. Thank you, truly. You have touched on the very topic that I needed to hear. <3 <3

Sweet Denise, knowing how much this post resonated for you right now makes me a million times happier than I wrote it. It was worth it (so very much!) for that alone. There is perhaps no emotion as life changing than grief and I too am sure I would be struggling on the blogging front it if I was mourning the loss of a treasured loved one. I admire your strength and ability to know that stepping back (by and large) from blogging on a regular basis was what you needed during this truly challenging time in your life. My heart and understanding are with you completely.

Denise, I'm so sorry you're going thru this rough time. My heart goes out to you and your family.

For me writing is something that just flows from me when it's ready. I can't force it. When I must write out of the zone I don't think the result is anywhere near the quality of my "flowing" work. Grieving is a process. Let yourself feel bad if that's where you are right now with your father's passing. When your heart is back into blogging you'll do it.

Another great post from you! I love reading posts like this because regardless of how long you've been blogging, there's always something you can take away from them. #7 resonates with me. When I was younger, I used to get so unbelievably mad when I thought someone had stolen my idea for a post or a contest or whatever! I've come to realize, though, that you're just making yourself unhappy by constantly patrolling and worrying about such things. It's going to happen no matter what, and like you said, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!

Tell us the hard facts Jessica:) We can take it from you because we know you'll give us a sweetie after:) A wonderful reality check post. I admire those bloggers who can see their blogs as a source of income because it isn't easy to keep things up and interesting. I like to look at my blog as a personal journey so if I can't blog regularly, it's a-okay and it's great to blog about what interests me. The best part about blogging is being with like minded folks like you:) You have a wealth of information to share with us:)

That's an awesomely nice way to look at my approach to such "harsh" topics, thank you very much, dear Joanna. It's true, I'll never be truly harsh or brutal. That's not who I am or how I like to treat people. These tips and points are just some of the more serious ones that didn't get covered, or covered in much depth, in last month's blogging related post and which I felt it was high time I discussed publicly (some have been touched on in emails I've received over the years from fellow bloggers who wanted to chat about such matters).

You are an unending wealth of information as well! I've never read one of your posts and not taking something new and wonderful away from it. I admire you and your site immensely and always look forward (very eagerly) to each new post you share with the world. Keep up the absolutely stellar work!

Thank you for sharing these, Jessica! I've been a long-time reader/lurker of your blog, and appreciate your honesty and good advice. (And all of your vintage inspiration, of course!) I'm preparing to start my first real blog, and it's all a little exciting and scary; this post came at just the right time.

Also, my apologies if this comment has posted repeatedly - I'm having trouble commenting in Blogger.

It's my sincere pleasure, Counterfeit Writer (great online handle, BTW). I very much appreciate that this post prompted you to un-lurk and share your first comment with me. It's always a special treat, and honour, when somebody does as much here (it's always fascinating to me to see which post compels someone to do as much).

Certainly feel free to share your new site's link with me once you've got it up and running. I've really like to check it out.

I am so happy that I was able to read this post today. I haven't been able to read my favorite blogs lately and was feeling stressed about so many things. I was certainly feeling some of the pressures you've mentioned and reading this post makes me feel so much more okay about it all. Thank you so much for your inspirational words!!

This is another great post, dear Jessica. It's so nice of you to put together all these tips, your very own learning experience and sincere thoughts. This will help a great deal so many people out there! It's wonderful to finally sit down and read your posts after such a hard week. I enjoy this so much and my heart and brain really appreciates it. Thank you so much :-)

Same here! I honestly doubt I could remember everything I've been offered over the years, but turned down because it was a million miles away from being suitable for my blog (and/or for other reasons, such as that I didn't feel the company was a reputable one). Everything from (modern) sneakers to online poker website memberships to (I kid you not) a tub of paint balls!

This is a great post, as usual, and very informative. I wish I was more dedicated to my blog, but so many other things in my life just don't give me the time I would love to have build up my blog. I don't expect mine to be as big as yours and I don't think I could handle it being that big. I honestly don't know how you do it.

I like my blog small and cozy, sort of how I like my homes. It is a nice little place to stay on the world wide web and it suits me. But I have made PLENTY of mistakes getting started and I have finally found my niche. {Being a mix of books, writing, vintage, and history love.} It's me and I just love that I've finally found it.

Thank you very much, dear Sean. It's great that you raise the point further regarding the amount of time that a blog can take up, especially if one is perusing it in a money making capacity. It's a time commitment that is simply not realistic for many and that's a-okay! If a person is happy with their blog (and what they get from the blogging experience) and can allot some time to it on a fairly routine basis, I think you're already doing great. I adore your site and the blend of topics that you cover. It's engaging, relevant to my interests, beautiful and always a true delight to visit and learn from. Keep up the marvelous work!

What a fabulous post! I truly enjoyed reading it from start to end, and as always you are so absolutely right. I thought about a few things (and of course had my own humble blog in my mind, when reading your words):1. I'm not very active on the internet, which I think is why I don't have that many readers. I'm way to busy living my "real life". I read blogs, like I read a magazine. Relaxing with a cup of tea. I write comments because I like what I read, not to gain more readers on my own blog. I LOVE your blog - suppose I've told you before. ;)4. I bulk blog. I gather inspiration in about a month and then blog about a months ahead. I make myself a pot of tea and sit most of a Sunday and blog (and translate too, just to double up the work). I love the planning function. This works really great for me.6. Silence is your best weapon. Dust it off your shoulders and forget it. Your Word doc method sounds great, I will remember that. :)7. No, there is "nothing positive you can do about it", than take it as a compliment, it must be damn good since it is worth steeling. Because steeling is what it is, only small people do that.

I'm a little behind with your blog, but will catch up during the weekend. Have a lovely weekend, dear. :)

Excellent comment and points, dear Sanne, thank you so very much for sharing. I often "bulk blog" (love that term!) myself, too. I've never written a month's worth of posts in a single day (I don't think that would even be possible logistically given the number of posts I share here in an average month and the size of each), but I do usually map out and plan many of the posts I want/plan to write a few weeks in advance and frequently have "writing days", where I'll pen two, three, or even four (if they're not too huge/labour intensive) posts in one day. I especially like to do this if if I know that I won't likely be able to do much writing during an upcoming period, that way I don't feel like I'm scrambling to stay on top of my writing (I loath scrambling to do just about anything - I work so much better when I'm well prepared!). I agree with you sooo much about silence! I've always worked better, no matter what I was doing, if I had silence. I don't listen to music, watch TV or movies, or have conversations while I write my posts. They'd suffer big time if I did. My favourite time to write posts is the middle of the night actually, when Tony and the pets are asleep and all the world is a silence haven for my creative spirit to run free.

My blog is only a shadow of yours, dear. I only post a photo of Marilyn on Mondays and a real post on Thursdays, and often these are very short-texted. Your lovely essays are the "King" and mine is only a "mouse". :) That's why I can blog four weeks ahead. I blogged yesterday and tried a new way of writing, I'm excited to hear what you think - next Thursday. Wishing you a lovely day. :)

That is awesomely kind of you, my dear, thank you! Fortunately (knock wood!) they are few and far between and those that have come my way, have never been truly horribly vicious or scary, just internet troll-ish usually, which are the easiest kind, I find, to brush right off and keep on going like nothing happened.

You are so generous with your expertise and knowledge, and I so admire the time and thought you put into your work. It has always been obvious to me that you seem to care deeply for your readers and their perceptions of your blog, and yet you continue to offer up whatever guidance might support others in their efforts. That is awesome! Happy Spring!

A round of applause to you for this amazingly insightful post. I wish this had been around when I began blogging, because there are a fair few things I could have learned. As it is, even with four years of blogging experience under my belt, I'm still learning and growing. Blogging is a very changeable medium, and there will always be more to learn. Thank you so much for sharing this advice.

Thank you deeply, dear Vanessa. I agree with you that blogging is a very changeable medium. I strongly feel like it (the blogging universe) has been going through a shift in the last couple of years in particular. I don't think blogging is dying out - far from it, but many blogs have shut down, been abandoned, or changed and fewer people that I know are still blogging or blogging with the same intensity they once did. I see a major shift towards sites like Instagram, FB, and Pinterest as forms, unto themselves, of micro blogging and thing that the blog landscape is gradually becoming quite a different thing than what it was 4-8 years ago in particular. As such, those of us who are continuing to blog often and with great passion need to be flexible and open to the change that our chose platform is undergoing and will continue to face as the years roll on.

Dear Jessica, I have just re-read this wonderful post again, and everything you write about here is so informative and helpful. It's sometimes difficult to know how often one should blog, and then as a result of sometimes not blogging frequently, feeling guilty about it. I also err on the side of caution when it comes to taking about my personal life on my blog, and I sometimes wonder if I should 'open up' to my readership a bit more. Thank you so much for all your heartfelt advice, as ever I look forward to your next post! Jenny xx

Sweet Jenny, thank you very much for your lovely comment and for revisting this post. I fully understand where you're coming from. I was, generally speaking, quite reserved with what I would share online when I first started blogging, but as time has gone on, I've learned to open up more here and such as been both cathartic and self-esteem building for me in the process. Of course there are some elements of my life (past and present alike) that I really can't fathom ever sharing on CV, but in general, I like to let people get to know me even better through some of the more intimate things that I post here and find that doing so has, to date, only helped strength my blog. I hope that same rings true for you as well, if you opt to "open up", as you said, more on your own wonderful site.

I'm Jessica, a lifelong lover of all things antique and vintage, especially those from the 1930s, 40s and 50s.

This blog is my visual scrapbook in which I record and share my thoughts on the multitude of sources, people and products that inspire and feed a modern gal's addiction to the past. I also post about the vintage clothes, hairstyles and make-up looks that I adore wearing.

Stay a spell and have a blast as we explore the incomparably fantastic world of vintage history and fashion together.

All images used on this site are credited to their original posters/creators/sources,
however if at any time you would prefer not to see one of your images here, please email me and I'll take it down right away.

PS...I just wanted to say thank you very much for visiting and to tell you that you're equal parts awesome and beautiful.