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A blessing in disguise

Hey all,

Been a long time since I've posted here. Hope everyone's been doing good! Just wanted to pass along some of my recent events in the hopes that it'll help some people down the road.

A couple weeks ago, I broke NC - yes you heard me, I broke NC. It was THE best decision I've made next to deciding to go full on NC and not because of what you are probably thinking. We didn't get back together but I'm much better off for it. As cliche at the saying goes, time does indeed heal all wounds.

It's quite a long story so I'll spare you all the dirty details and give you the Coles Notes version If you have any questions and/or want more details, feel free to ask and I'll share them with you.

- I broke NC, yes that's right I broke NC. But I was completely confident that I was ready for any, and I mean ANY, reply she came back with. I have never felt this happy and confident in my life. Truly feel like I'm over her finally.

- At first she seemed glad to hear from me and wanted to know how I was doing so we exchanged a couple emails (with a couple days waiting between replies).

- All of a sudden, when I told her what I've been up to lately, what my big summer plans were (because she asked) and that I was doing really well, her replies started going cold and short. The tone went a complete 180 from the first couple of upbeat replies. I found it pretty odd considering I kept my replies upbeat and friendly - just like I do w/ all my other exchanges w/ anyone else.

- Her last reply was pretty much a one-liner after I told her I booked a vacation to Australia and thanked for giving me a couple tips because she went in Feb. I wished her a great weekend in the email before and didn't get one in return, nice huh?

Now if this was even 2 months ago, I'd be wracking my brains over this whole exchange and it would've set me back like crazy. Today? I can honestly say I'm leaving her out of my life and could not be more glad to do so. Why? Easy, the rose colored glasses have come off and my ex proved to me that:

1. She reminded me of all the times she went hot and cold at the snap of a finger during our relationship. This frustrated me to no end...

2. She definitely is a completely different person than the one I fell in love with.

3. She doesn't seem to have changed one bit since we split.

4. I'm better off without her, even as an acquaintance.

5. I deserve better than to be brushed aside like that... SOOOOO deserve better than what she has to offer.

One thing I haven't mentioned yet is that there are a couple wonderful ladies that I met in my volleyball league that I really want to get to know more When I think of these ladies, I can't help but feel happy and giddy. When I think of my ex, all I feel is indifference (a bit of regret because it's a shame how she's reacting towards me right now).

Knowing what I know now, I can honestly and confidently say that our breakup was a blessing in disguise. I have no ill will towards my ex, i really hope she finds happiness because it does feel as if she's not completely happy w/ life right now. I'll always take all the good things I experienced from our relationship and combine them w/ all the things I've learned from the breakup moving forward to ensure that my next relationship is as successful and as happy as possible

This is amazing, zedtech! See NC really does make you strong after all. I love NC. I truly think it's the only way to allow people to heal and allow people time to get their heads straight and begin to accept... ofcourse as long as the person has the right perspectives in their mind about the situation and they want to better themselves for them! Sounds like you have truly succeeded in that and you should be very proud of yourself for coming all this way.