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Monday, December 28, 2015

She's Always Disturbing me for Marriage!

Good morning aunty Amara, my name is K ,29 years old and about to round up my masters programme. There is this girl that has been close to me over a year now, she is 25 years old and she is a tailor.
Each time we meet, she will always be raising issues concerning marriage. Though I don't have a job yet and have also told her that am not ready for marriage now. But she will be calling and telling me that she has been rejecting other suitors for my sake and that its me she wanted to be with.
Ma I don't know what to do now. The age bracket I think is close and most importantly no job. Please advice me.

You sound like this lady approached you for a relationship, toasted you and you then accepted to be with her out of pity. You don't sound like you are in the relationship nor do you sound like you are in love with her as an individual. She calls you, disturbs you, her age is close and you don't have money or job. Please let me ask, hope she doesn't give you sex too? Well that's left for you to answer. But since she's a liability to you, kindly bid her goodbye and allow her to date a man who is emotionally and mentally mature for a relationship and not a man who seems not to know where he's heading to because if you are comfortable with her personality you would know that you have an asset because she's working and making some money and she's honest to let you know that she cannot be with you and still be dating another man. Since you are afraid of committing yourself to her, kindly stop wasting her time and emotions, that's truly what she deserves from you,total liberation from every form of time wasters and no ambition partners. When you are prepared for a relationship, I'm certain that you will find a lady whose age will be farther from yours and won't disturb you about marriage.

6 comments:

So many people seem not to believe this story...But i must let you all know that there is every possibility that things happened this way...I'm not typing based on assumptions..I am a living witness..Many ladies have formed this habit of forcing themselves onto guys who have not said anything or made promises to them..It is so common these days as some guys here could bear me witness...A lady gets close to you and before you know it, she starts making very sensitive statements as if you had a blood convenant with her..The moment you decide to call her to attention to let her know that nothing ever existed between both of you, she becomes so frustrated...she suddenly hates you more than satan for no reason...some could even seek to tarnish your image or look for ways to hurt you...This might sound unbelievable but it's the new form of madness in town....Bros...Don't let her lure you into what you know nothing about...Forget all her antics to attract pity and make you feel guilty...I'll advice you to declare your stand and possibly cut her off..Such ladies are extremists and could be so dangerous..Use your head

You are on track, Mr Joseph.. but veered off at some point... A lot of guys(not all) are guilty of accepting emotional 'gifts' from ladies but aren't interested in the full package. You take her time, efforts, emotional attachment, sometimes resources, most times sex..etc. (all these she offers, which you accept as much as you want) and when the beat of the music changes, you begin to look for excuses.... My motto is "if you can't or won't deliver as needed, don't accept at all.. it's all a package"... Lets learn to always define our relationships from the very beginning.. it goes a long way in curbing 'assumptions'.. remember, purpose undefined, abuse inevitable!

@auntie Amara on point@AtJoseph,till it happens to your sisteror your daughter,a boy will later be man.Dont even start what you cant finish,even if she is the one that approached him first,to that extreme,he can say no,he will not even accept and linger the relationship,if its is ok with you,ok,remember its vice versa,it can turn the other way round to be you that wants a girl that way and she will do you thus to know how far.If you dont want a thing stop,dont waste people's time or play with their emotions.God is watching,it can be you....so is it all abt sex?