Tips for Writing Your Own Wedding Vows

Posted: 09/18/17

Personally, I am a huge fan of couples writing their own vows. Even for those with writing backgrounds, coming up with your own wedding vows is intimidating. You want to articulately express how you feel without sounding cliché. Check out these tips to help you through the writing process!

Consult Your Officiant

For many couples, the officiant of their wedding is someone they are close with. Having married countless couples in the past, they may have quality advice to share with you on what to include and leave out of your vows. Also, depening on your faith background, some officiants require that you include all or part of the traditional vows.

Read Wedding Vows for Inspirations

Whether these inspirational vows come from a friend's wedding, a movie, or a Google search, they can be great jumping-off points. Feel free to borrow from poetry or books, especially if it holds a special place in your loved one's heart. Write down words or phrases that strike a chord and capture how you really feel.

Reflect on Your Relationship

If you keep a journal, flip through to read how you fell in love with your fiancé. If not, take some time to reflect on your relationship. Here are a few questions to think about to get you started:

At what moment did you realize this person was the one?

What makes your relationship special?

What was it like when you first met him/her?

What do you love most about your fiancé?

What do you miss most about them when you are apart?

What difficult time have you gone through together?

What kind of future do you want to have with them?

How has your life changed for the better since meeting him/her?

What do you hope to achieve together?

How does your fiancé inspire you?

Make Promises

Vows are essentially a list of promises you publicaly make to your fiancé. These promises are the most important part of your vows, so make sure you spend extra time planning them out. Talk with your fiancé beforehand about what you expect and hope for out of marriage. It is best to include a few promises that are broad in scope and a few that are specific to your relationship.

Time it Out

It is best to keep your vows short and to the point. In your first draft, include everything because you can always edit out things later. Your final draft should aim to be around one to two minutes. Read it out loud because then you will be able to tell what parts sound awkward or would be best to include in a letter to your fiancé on the morning of your wedding.

Practice Make Perfect

You want your vows to feel conversational and effortless. Edit out tongue twisters and run-on sentences. In this momvent, you want to focus solely on your fiancé, not trying to pronounce difficult words correctly. Recite your vows in front of a mirror or to a close friend so that on your big day it flows out naturally.

If you're in need of a little inspiration make sure to check out the video below! These were some of the best wedding vows we've ever heard!