so we have entered the longest day and from here, although it is hard to believe, the days will slowly shorten and the nights, the darkness increase.

this solstice day in the new forest is lovely~blue sky with a little light, whispy cloud~the baby sparrows are being particularly rowdy in the garden and i can hear the jackdaw families chattering in the big evergreen behind our little house.

yesterday we finished packing up 'pretty pagan' for our week away~my old~older than i am~wool blankets are packed~three of them, i never go away without them and they have multi-purpose uses, i have some clothes in a bag~my two skirts, vest tops, jeans and pyjamas and now, more importantly i have to make my book selection...

this is difficult~i have many books on the go already and i just know that while away i will have the urge to read something from another book.

my 'book bag'is one i bought a few years ago and is very much like a carpet bag but made of a soft plaid blanket and it can hold many books~who needs lots of clothes when you can have more books?!

i was up at 3.15 this morning in the hopes of seeing the green comet or the Comet McNaught 2009 R1 that is gracing our skies at this time but was unlucky.

image michael jager

i will try again tonight and tomorrow night and tuesday when it is reported to be at its brightest

if you want to see where it will be go here and scroll down~it shows a good layout of where to look in relation to the plough.

~*~*~*

thank you all for your kind comments regarding my swampy.he has been poorly for well over a year now and getting worse, although he has been plodding on, trying to keep a normal life as possible while having all kinds of different blood tests, investigations and changes in medication etc.

it was only because his consultant took notice of re-occurring abnormal liver functions and a leison on his liver (that previous doctors had chosen to ignore~i know, dont ask!) that he finally had his diagnosis.at the moment they do not know whether his severe back pain and IBS are part of the AIH or separate problems, but i imagine once he starts treatment we shall eventually find out.we are off to see the consultant the week after next in order to find out what is going to happen next.

*~*~*~

its funny how much i took our health for granted until it all started to go downhill.i remember never being unwell, with the exception of regular migraines, but since i have been living with m.e and then diabetes, and slowly having swampy unwell...our world now revolves around trying to lead normal lives while juggling~remembering to take assorted medications at different times, regular doctor and hospital appointments...to say nothing of our individual problems~my dreadful memory (my short term memory is atrocious and a cause for some laughter), swampy can walk only very short distances before having to stop for a few minutes because of the pain.

i am thinking we need to carry this...

...with us when we are out!

*~*~*~

we both have what my old doctor called 'invisible illness'~this is how he explained why i would have negative reactions from people in relation to my m.e.~i have had many people just look at me and say 'oh but you look fine'~well yes i look fine', i think while biting my tongue, but come and live for a day in my body and have all my aches, pains, poor memory, extreme tiredness and then come and tell me i look fine!we do not look obviously ill when people immediately meet either of us~although we both know the signs when each of us are really bad and i think we unconsciously make allowances for each other at these times and it doesn't always make for easy living.

while there is a lot we can no longer do and wish we could~oh we both miss snowboarding so much!~we do try to do somethings, such as our camping.with a camper things are much easier, although there are some people who do not count a campervan as camping! our camping does not include hiking, rock climbing etc,we find somewhere, park, unpack the kettle and cups and tea bags, set up chairs and get out books and relax and enjoy mother nature and giving ourselves gentle walks while throwing a ball for flynt (he is still growing like a weed and enjoys catch with his ball each and every walk!).

then of course there is our small garden~we have had to accept we cannot manage even a half allotment plot between us and so grow what we can in our small garden~this year pea shoots, tomato's, cut and come again salad which i have planted in a large wooden vegetable crate and at the base of my blueberry bush, chillies and cucumbers which are planted among the plants as well as lots of different herbs. if this goes well we shall venture into potato's, peas and other things next year.we hope to find a small corner to place a slimline water butt as well as incorporating a smallish compost bin.i am also hoping that i can utilise a part of my mums huge garden~it is really a big wildlife garden with very old fruit tree's, pond and three lawns and a pet graveyard~with vegetables and flowers in pots. if there is no room for a compost bin here i am hoping to have one or two here at mums where there is much more room~it would be no problem in cycling my pre-compost state bits the five minutes down the road every few days.

*~*~*~

well now, that turned into a post and a half didn't it?the clouds are clearing now and it is time to have a little walk around the garden~when i opened the back door for flynt the smell of tomato's drifted in~it was wonderful

the last one was too light~too fluffy for me, but i didn't want to go too dark~this is the perfect one.

i am not by nature a light, fluffy kind of soul.

don't get me wrong i enjoy fun and laughing, but there is the more shadowy, solitary, introspective me that lives side by side with the light.

~*~*~*

unfortunately keiths meeting didn't go as well as hoped for and so its back to the drawing board, this time we have the help of a very good local group who can support keith.

and my migraine is still lingering~not as bad as it has been but its there, like a whisper in my head, always threatening to come back.

*~*~*~

i am having problems adjusting to my new found freedom~something i did not think would be possible, but it is!every now and then the thought that i should be reading a scholarly book, making notes or planning an essay creeps into my mind and i still get that odd feeling~a kind of heart clenching feeling that i have forgot to do something important~then i remember that no, i have nothing of consequence to do, no deadlines to meet, no exams on the horizon.last year the end of one course and the beginning of the other overlapped so i had no break.

today i have a a few films selected on the tv to watch 'rooster cogburn'~i adore katherine hepburn and 'my big fat greek wedding' plus a mini film about a city dweller who goes to man an isolated lighthouse.

however the day is proving to be nice and sunny and so i expect i will record them and watch them at night. especially as i had planned on checking the camper to make sure everything we need is in there for our trip away next week.although we are only going five miles from home once we are there its a pain to pack things away just to go out to replace anything we have left behind.

my mum is popping round with our weekly egg delivery today~they come from one of the local lad's who i grew up with and they are the most gorgeous eggs~all diffent sizes and colors, coming to us covered in dirt and the odd feather or piece of straw~and you should taste them! this batch i shall be packing carefully and storing in 'pretty pagan' to make omelettes while we are away.

*~*~*~

this thing about cooking in a camper is that it has to be simple~some proper motorhomes come with a full size cooker with four gas rings, grill and even an oven. pretty pagan has a simple two ring burner and grill so i always try to keep it simple, using only one or two pots and/or the grill. so if any of you have ideas for quick, simple one pot wonders i would love to hear from you!

~a sneeky peek~

here is pretty pagan being made ready for the night on our recent trip to avebury~the bench seats and table at the back converts to a large bed~room enough for two people and a puppy.

i have been flooded under a fog of a migraine since sunday~to make matters worse i had my Classical Studies exam yesterday and had done almost no revision since sunday.

what a time to have one that lasted longer than a day.

well i muddled through my exam, just knowing as i wrote that i was missing out important things like referencing sources~but you know, i just couldn't remember anything except the bare bones. my mind was a total blank.

i felt so relieved when it was over and went to bed full of the joys of summer for i now have eight months where my studies are not dominating my life.

that joy ended when i woke at 6am with the migraine back with a vengeance. its still there in the background.

i think i am stressed for keith has an important meeting regarding his health~the health problems that have been dogging him for over a year now has finally been diagnosed as auto-immune hepatitis.this meeting can go either way so of course we are hoping for a good outcome and we can both stop feeling so stressed.

*~*~*~

some fun is on the horizon however for we are off to a friends solstice camp on monday~the camp is only five miles from our home but on the coast over looking the isle of wight.we only decided to go yesterday as a celebration for finishing my course and as either celebration or commiseration on the outcome of tomorrow.

and after leaving a new box at the checkout yesterday,i was lucky enough to find two bags of Dr.Stuarts Tranquillity tea~a relaxing mix of hawthorn berries, lime flowers, scullcap, yarrow and fennel~hiding in a cupboard...

right now i obviously need something stronger, much stronger. so not only do i need to go to sweet joe pye for something to stop me being a crazed evil entity each month and shampoo and conditioner, but i also need some kalms sleep.

***

i have been awake since goodness knows what time~swampy came to bed very late at which time flynt decided to get up and eat his supper and then wanted to go into the garden~this obviously woke me up a bit too much and i lay for a while, staring up at the dark ceiling, then i put my ipod on~usually a bit of music sends me off to sleep.

not today for as i lay there i noticed the sky slowly becoming lighter and when it was light enough to actually see the lichen on our neighbours roof i gave up all pretense of getting back to sleep.

i made my way into the kitchen~the clock said 4am~and made myself a mug of lemon tea and some breakfast, then opened the windows to hear the bird song~and here i still sit.

...for those lovlies out there with a fondness for birkenstocks~you know who you are...

ohhh i love these

my other birkenstocks are 'cold, damp, wet day' ones~these are for hot sunny days when extra air is needed around the foot region.

~~~

its a showery day here in this ancient forest but still very warm and so we are expecting thunder at some point today.we popped into lymington for a few bits and bobs but my skirt kept me cool and my boots my feet dry

so many of you lovely souls out there are of my own heart, so thought you might like to see my new, long and swishy skirt that arrived today

ohh its lovely~comfortable and easy to wear. its also of thick enough cotton that it can be worn with funky tights and boots in the winter~so all year use means its well worth the money~£21 thats all!i love it so much i contacted the lady selling it asking about the blue one she had~its going to be mine!

******

while sitting in the garden i took a few shots of my most favorite areas~

while i was out in the garden with my revision, and before it became too hot to stay out there~we do not lose the sun until about 3pm when we get a slice of shade at the house end of our garden~

one of my many hag stones~this one was on a piece of purbeck stone in my bird bath~little flynt discovered it and so i hung it on silver wire and hung this on a birch and willow frame i made and this hangs outside my back door

swampy hard at work and the old wooden school stool which i painted a jolly sea blue~on it sits an ancient, broken roof tile from our old cottage in dorset, on this sits a candle holder, incense holder and a pot of ivy~and when it is back in its rightful position with my chair next to it~there sits my glass or mug. the little dish is holding my crystals which were having a day in the sun.

looking through the arch to my beloved rowan~when i bought it two years ago it was a small stick with some roots. for about a year it lived in a pot and last year we planted it in the earth and i never thought it would have grown so tall and beautiful in only about four months. next to it is some thyme planted up in an old barbecue

herb patch...well one of them, i have herbs scattered throughout our garden

i have been looking around lately and seeing a distinct lack of color and joy around me~in me, my home, my blog...note i have added a new background...and my spirit.

our trip to Avebury seemed to wake something deep inside me, making me need some color and change in my life.

following the very hot weekend spent at Avebury and seeing our little pixie friend sujee in a wonderful long skirt complete with black boots i started to think wistfully of my days spent living in long, cool, swishy skirts~warmed up for winter with funky tights.

well only a day or two later there was a knock at our door and opening it i found a bag hanging on the door~our lovely neighbour had left a dress she no longer wore wanting a good home~its beautiful~its colorful paisley and its long~and it looked great with my green boots, vintage waistcoat and a long scarf...

had a bit of a fight with the breeze to get this shot!

well this has set me off re-evaluating my wardrobe and i have even bought a long indian wraparound skirt in a lovely burnt orange which i hope will arrive today...if it turns into one of those 'i never want to take it off' items i will be buying a second in shades of blue!

then on the same day i wore this outfit the wonderful soul that is miss.r 'facebooked' about her outfit~long skirt and DM boots...

are there any more of you lovely souls out there finding love in long skirts and boots?

we went into burley the other day and i bought myself a new bag~i have a thing about bags i have to admit but when i saw this one last week it played on my mind, almost calling me back to buy it~its roomy enough for all the things i tend to carry around, including a book or my moleskine if i think i am going to be hanging around, soft corduroy with embroidered areas and 'hippie'~there is no other word for it and i adore it...

hippie bag and birkenstocks!

*~*~*~

my heart has been feeling lighter too. for a few days last week i was horrid~it was my moontime so i was feeling somewhat evil anyway, but it took my swampy to tell me what an utterly grumpy old bag i was.oh those hormones, my moontime has passed and with it the veil of the hag i had become~i need to pay a visit to sweet joe pye i think and get me some herbs!

~*~*~*

~the sun has been shining for a few days now and this has helped raise my mood and i feel like a bubbling stream right now~i spent time in the garden yesterday and just soaked up the earths energies spiralling up~