Trust

They were perfect together. He understood her and she understood him. They were like two people moulded in a single masterpiece. Although society perceived them as perfect, they were flawed in one single way. And that was the crack in their perfect personas. He only asked for one thing. Just one. For her to trust him. Oh, she loved him alright. And he loved her too. But somehow, she could never trust him. He did everything in his might to make her feel that he was trustworthy. But he never realized that the fault was never his, but hers. Her past made her scared of believing. Of trusting the one person she loved in the entire world. More than anyone else. After so many years, when that crack finally tore them apart, he asked her the only question she never answered, “Why didn’t you trust me?”

Trust. Memories flash when scenes, people, dates and times can be seen like a motion picture in our mind. And trust is something that one needs to be able to exist in this world. Maybe like love. But people always think that love conquers all and comes before trust. But the harsh reality is that unless there is no trust, people are sans love. We start trusting people at the time when we can’t even speak, hoping that when our mother says she will surely give us that toy, she will. A child trusts his friend, when he tells him a secret and says, “I trust you not to tell Mr. Sharma that I was the one who broke his window!” We trust our business partners, and believe that they will not break our trust in money matters and ideas. Sometimes we trust total strangers, because maybe they are the only people we can trust in our lives.

But sometimes trusting someone scars us for life. It leaves these little cracks in our reflection. And these cracks are what then finally break us. Its like there is always a certain amount of trust before betrayals. And then you get sucked in this vacuum of self – detriment and sadness that you don’t have a way out. You try to find a path towards the light, towards happiness but your eyes are so blinded by the darkness that engulfs you. You try to blame the person for the scars but then thoughts of you being wrong and letting that person hurt you creeps in. You blame yourself. But one final fiasco is the fact that maybe that person will mend his ways. You construe your own false reality of everything being all right again. That you will accept the person back into your life. Because you are unable to fill in the emptiness.

But is that reality believable?

Believing someone and trusting someone are interchangeably used by most of the people around us. But they make a lot of difference in our lives. Believing something is very temporary. You are not really sure about that person but you tend to believe her at that point of time. Hoping for something better. Trusting someone is rather long term. You tend to know the person very well and know that they will be with you know matter what. Maybe that is why trusting hurts a lot more than believing.

So what makes the world go around? Love, trust, hope or belief? I guess it’s the way you perceive life. But one thing I know is that breaking someone’s trust by words and thoughts and actions hurts far more than physical pain. Ruining someone’s life is just sad. It’s not making you gain brownie points. And if you have had your trust broken in some way, get relief from the fact that you are a part of a whole lot of people. And finally hope for a better reality.
That’s the harsh truth of life, readers.

Kartiki Bhatnagar is a 18 year old currently pursuing her undergrad in University of Waterloo under Psychology. She is obsessed with penning down her thoughts and when she is bored, she would love to interest you in being a Drama Queen.