15 Types of People You Find in Every Gym

Often an older guy (although not exclusively) who never actually seems to leave the locker room. The nudist spends an inordinate amount of time in a state of complete undress, seemingly doing their best to always stand in a position that exposes them fully (usually one foot up on a bench).

2.The Sweater

Usually found – the cross-trainer

The kind of person who need only look at a treadmill to break into a sweat yet always seems to wear grey and never brings a towel. Be careful following them round the gym as they rarely wipe down any equipment, usually providing you with a cold shower if you get anywhere near them.

3.The Screamer

Usually found – the free weights section

There’s always that one person who wants everyone in the gym to know that they’re lifting weights. The screamer seems to revel in drawing attention by making as much noise as possible during a lift before dropping the weight and letting out a scream. Beware of the whooping when multiple screamers train together.

4.The Beauty Queen
Usually found – the exercise bike

The kind of girl who turns up to the gym in brand new sports gear, hair perfectly styled and a spade full of makeup on before managing to leave the gym in exactly the same perfectly quaffed state. Seems to spend more time gossiping and reading magazines than actually doing any exercise.

5.The Mayor

Usually found – around the PT’s

There’s always that one guy who seems to know everybody in the gym. His warm-up usually involves chats and high-fives with all the other bros meaning no exercise is done for the first half-hour in there. The mayor may not be the biggest or the strongest guy in the gym but he still walks around like he owns the place.

6.The ‘Expert’

Usually found – hanging around the free weights

The ‘expert’ is that person who never seems to actually do any exercise, yet is constantly offering advice to others on how they can ‘improve’ their technique. The ‘expert’ seems to revel in disrupting people’s sets and generally causing a nuisance around the gym.

7.The Cougar

Usually found – anywhere there’s fresh meat

Often a divorcee, the cougar is usually a middle aged woman on the hunt for some new young meat. The cougar works hard in the gym to try and keep in great shape but always has one eye on any potential prey, especially in the free weights section.

8.The Selfie
Usually found – anywhere there’s a mirror

The selfie is the kind of gym-goer who doesn’t seem capable of going up to the gym without their mobile phone. If they’re not checking in on Facebook then they’re usually taking a selfie which they can put on Instagram later. Should you ever be able to tempt them away from their phones you’ll struggle to draw their attention from the mirrors.

9.The Dude

Usually found – the weights room

The dude is often an older guy who tends to keep himself to himself. Most people will completely fail to notice him when at the gym, but to those who pay enough attention they will realise this guy knows his stuff. He has perfect form on every rep and despite not looking like anything special he warms up with your one rep max.

10.The Protein Monster

Usually found – in the locker room

The protein monster is often just about the skinniest bloke in the gym, yet chugs down whey protein like there’s no tomorrow. Unfortunately what he fails to realise is that you actually need to lift some weights to bulk up.

11.The Monopoliser
Usually found – the corner of the gym

The monopoliser is possibly the single most annoying person in the gym. They seem to try to gather as many weights and machines as possible before proceeding to lay claim to all of them throughout the duration of their workout. There is no point approaching them however as they will simply tell you the machine/weight is in use despite not having touched it yet.

12.The Window Shoppers

Usually found – anywhere there’s a potential partner

The window shopper seems to see the gym as an opportunity to meet a new partner. Much like the beauty queen they come fully decked out in new gear, spending most of their time eyeing up potential mates and will take any opportunity to try to strike up a conversation.

13.The Newbie

Usually found – amongst the weights machines

You can’t fault the gym newbie for enthusiasm, they throw themselves into every machine they possible can and often find new, totally ‘unique’ ways to use them. The problem is the newbie usually has terrible form and no plan so ends up going round in circles until someone points them in the right direction.

14.The Couch Potato

Usually found – sitting bike

The couch potato probably gets more exercise walking from their car to the locker room than they do in the gym itself. They can usually be found sitting around on the bikes pedaling at a rate that can barely constitute movement whilst reading a novel heavier than any weight they will ever lift.

15.The Super Woman

Usually found – free weights section

There’s always at least one girl in the gym who seems capable of lifting more than any of the blokes in there. She always looks in fantastic shape but doesn’t feel the need to flaunt it like the beauty queen. The Super Woman can usually be found warming up with a weight heavier than your PB.

16. The Yoga Guy – BONUS

Usually found – any class that contains at least an 80% female attendance

The guy who you always see around but never actually in the gym. Spend long enough looking though and you’ll find him attending any class with a primarily female audience. Always looks a bit too keen to partake in partner based activities, especially ones that involve contact.

COMMENT: Who do you always see that you think we missed off? Comment below!

About James Bradford

The Reverse Bungalow, I see these guys a lot and they come under many names, you know the type…really well built on the arms/chest/back but wear long shorts to hide the fact leg day is non existent…all up top with nothing below…

The deodorant guy – this guy reeks, I mean just stinks to high heaven of b.o. This guy is usually found doing overhead presses or some type of dumbell raises. How people can smell this bad and not notice is beyond me.

Very comprehensive list. Good job. Id add a few more annoying ones like the unsupervised minor or the i work here so my workout is more important than yours guy. Also aquantaince i barely know but am forced into daily prolonged interaction because we go to same gym person

I tell you what made me laugh in summer I was looking skinny and just come in gym with baggies on so heads upstairs on there’s two lads using seated leg curl with ridiculous weight for them not even doing a quarter rep and I asked them how long they be and they ignored me so I am stood talking to one of lads about injurys and bad form,you know when your bugging someone. Any how they came of and he said you want plates on I said no jumped on and warmed up for 15 with that weight and then later down stairs they saw me stripped of you just know what they thought early on the skinny guy in the gym how wrong they where,funny as hell,not been seen at gym since. It takes all sorts,had some great times when I worked in gyms and managed the biggest private one in bradford till it closed. Your not going to belive this one but other people who visited that gym where not of this earth,ghostly one I had just cleaned toilets and cashed up and reception ready for morning and clear as day I heard a door open and footsteps like on a metal gantry. Story goes the mill was a old dye works and somebody had died falling in. You never seen a 19 stone bodybuilder run out of the building so quick. Any one else now of any haunted gyms it’s one of my other interest.

You missed the guy who actually wants to get fit, but every time he walks into the gym seems to get stares from all the muscle freaks over the weight section wondering why someone who wants to get fit is coming to a gym. Gym are obviously for people who are already fit and not at all for people who want to get fit….