It never fails to amaze me how much self-satisfaction something like this lends to the dim-witted atheist community. It’s apparently perceived as a huge victory for ‘your side’ whenever some crackpot comes up with something like this – apparently not understanding what’s actually in the Bible.

Please allow me to remind you that, at the same time as the media went wild with this ridiculous prediction, Barack Obama’s hand-picked golden-child of the CDC actually released a public warning on how to prepare yourself for a Zombie Apocalypse – after a study whose cost I’m sure topped six figures.

So reflect on this: while persons of varying degrees of intelligence believe in some or all aspects of what’s written in the Bible, only an idiot believes in Zombie Apocalypse, and only an even more profound idiot would put THAT idiot in charge of one of the most important branches of the government.

But only a THUNDERING MORON would VOTE for the idiot who elevated the other idiot, which I am sure that all of the fans of this website plan to do in 2012.

Actually, all you evidently know about what is in the bible is what your pastor, minister, or etc, tells you is in the bible. Anyone who actually reads the bible, understands it for what it truly is, usually becomes a non-believer.

Please remember that many of the kinds of things you’d need to include in an emergency kit for a Zombie Apocalypse would also be useful during an earthquake, or hurricane, or tornado, or flood. Or if you’re left behind after the Rapture, even.

So, tell us. What do you call somebody who died a brutal death, rose bodily from the grave with his gaping wounds still open, and who proceeded to order his thralls to stick their fingers in his sides and fondle his intestines in order to prove his bona fides?

You churchgoers may well sing his praises, but the rest of us are reachin’ for our shotguns and aimin’ for the head.

Well, not really, of course. See, those of us who are “unchurched” are capable of distinguishing fantasy from reality. So, it’s more like, we’re reachin’ for the popcorn and laughing our asses off.

Did you actually read the Zombie Apocalypse post from the CDC? I did. It was hilarious. And, more to the point, completely on-point and informative about emergency preparedness for the non-Zombie Apocalypse situations people are finding themselves in … well … today in Missouri, for example.

I’ll bet the cost of that post ran into the tens of dollars.

I’m not Dr. Coyne, but if you think this type of non-thinking is going to gain traction with the audience of this site, you’re sadly and seriously mistaken.

Come on, this must be a Poe. Please, it must be. Nobody could be so… but then again, Camping’s followers are. Hm.

not understanding what’s actually in the Bible.

What’s actually in the bible is Jesus’ promise that the end of the world would happen within the lifetime of his contemporaries.

I know that some people, like Ebonmuse, argue that Jesus most likely never existed but his life stories were meant as parables, as a novel. But it is embarrassing details like this which do not seems to fit that conclusion and seem to make it more probable to me that he existed, and that he was merely another raving doomsday cultist like so many others throughout history.

The way I understand it, the theory is that he never existed at all, that the gospels were meant to be read a bit like inspirational novels, and that everybody at the time they circulated among the early Christians knew that they were fiction. See this page and the three chapters it links to: http://www.ebonmusings.org/atheism/camel.html.

I am just saying that the gospels seem to contain too many embarrassing things to convince that they are entirely made up; ridiculously obvious contradictions, failed prophecies, temper tantrums of the presumed messiah just after he preached that everybody should be gentle, and then of course how he cursed the fig tree because it did not bear fruit out of season. Would you, if you could create your saviour story out of whole cloth, produce such a terrible mess?

Christianity actually being the syncretism of a Hellenic philosophical movement and a Jewish sect does not preclude the possibility that at the root of the Jewish sect may originally have been some kind of third rate failed doomsday cultist. Obviously his importance will have been vastly exaggerated and his miracle healings invented, but who would invent some of the sillier parts of the story if they could avoid them?

I’d agree that at least some of the stories are based on real events. For example, the one about Jesus in the wilderness just has to be based on something that actually happened – nobody would have made up a story where Jesus wanders around not performing miracles.

That doesn’t necessarily mean that Jesus was real, of course – he could just as easily be a character based on stories that happened to be floating around at the time.

Um…wow…dim-witted as we may be we know plenty of what is in the Bible – most of the time that is exactly what turned us off to it in the first place. I don’t care if you don’t like us laughing and poking fun – you deserve the ridicule.

“We’re in the business of telling people maybe there is someone you can talk to, and that’s God.”

Well, obviously (1) isn’t working – he’s not getting any wisdom from god, or any other source for that matter. That makes (2) somewhat moot – why the hell talk to god when he doesn’t care to act anyway (for example, no wisdom for Camping and no Rapture) – and that’s being extremely generous by assuming that there is a god to talk to, which there clearly isn’t.