Wednesday, January 20, 2010

What are you willing to do for a title? I don’t mean a title in the sense of a status symbol the title I am talking about is one you are born with. “Brother” or “sister,” “mom” or “dad” how much are you willing to put up with, help out or even forgive someone because of their title in your life? I was speaking with a very good friend of mine yesterday who I have a lot in common with and we were talking about family issues and she made the comment “I would not do that just because she is my sister, she is an adult and can make her own decisions and live with the consequences.” This is a valid point.

I am the oldest of four and my three younger brothers are some of my very favorite people and my best friends. Each in their own right is a truelove of mine and before I had children they were the most adorable things in my life. Now we are all grown and those of us who are going to get married have done that. Even though we are older now there is still not a lot I would not do for any one of them. Maybe this is not “normal” but the first time I even recognized another way of thinking was on the phone yesterday. And I cannot argue with my friend either. She is right, our siblings (all 28 years old and up) are responsible for their own lives so we do not owe each other anything just for a title. And while there are times when a brother will aggravate me to the point that I have to just walk away from him because I do not agree with decisions he is making I would still not ever refuse him help. To take it even one step further I still wish that my brothers have every joy and pleasure in life and it would be enough for me if they did even if I did not. I love them sometimes because I like them and sometimes not.

Any one of my brothers could call and ask for anything and I would give everything I could. I feel the need to add the caveat that unless of course he is a threat to one of my children but my brothers are saints to their nieces. There was never a better uncle. I would not ever put my little girls out for them but I will always be there for them to lean on. I guess that I am lucky that my brothers are my soul mates because that makes it easier but for a title I would do most anything.