I laughed in a black humor sort of way. I completely recognize this style of talking, both in myself and from other women in meetings. I was told once that my manner of speaking was really aggressive and that people would be more receptive if I toned it down. I started peppering my talk with “it just seems like to me”, and “I’m a little confused, can you explain this?” and people were, indeed, more receptive.

But while people listen to me more, I worry a lot that it makes me seem less confident, like I’m less leadership material. I almost never hear executive men speak like this. And I wouldn’t know if executive women speak like this, because I work in software and I very rarely encounter executive women.