I wouldn't be surprised to learn that Karl Lagerfeld discovered an elixir which brings dead designers back to life, and there's a basement somewhere in Paris where zombie versions Christian Dior, Yves Saint Laurent, Gianni Versace, and Coco Chanel are feeding on interns while working day and night to design the eight-and-a-half million projects the designer has in the works at any one time. There's no way one single human man could do all of it, but we'll leave speculation for some other day, because today we have to talk about another Karl Lagerfeld launch. (See how he does it? So long as we never have a chance to catch our breath and question, Karl can keep this scheme up forever. Because even if he dies, one of his interns will feed him the elixir and ta-da!)

Tonight, the Kaiser will be revealing his Olympics capsule collection at Selfridges in London. Items will range from £95 and £325, and be tight and uncomfortable enough to restrict any kind of athletic activity. Leave the movement to the pros, got it? Certain pieces are splattered with gold paint, putting an Olympics twist on the rave pant.