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STEVE THE PRODUCER

STP's BLOG 07/09/12 "How To Stay Young"

by STP,posted Jul 9 2012 7:41AM

Sad news to report…actor Earnest Borgnine passed away at the age of 95. For many of you younger folk, you probably don’t know who he is…but he was the voice in SpongeBob SquarePants. Ok, he was in more notable stuff, hell he even won an Oscar…back in 1955! BJ listed off a bunch of movies & TV shows he was in (From Here to Eternity, McHale’s Navy, The Dirty Dozen, Airwolf, etc)…but I haven’t seen a single one of them. However…I do remember this interview he did, where Earnest probided the best advice on how to stay young!

Howie Mandel called the cops early yesterday morning because a man and a woman were having SEX in his bathroom. Howie threw a 4th of July party on Wednesday, and it must have been a good one, because it was still going on at 1:00 A.M. Thursday morning. That's when Howie heard sounds of lust coming from the bathroom. Hmmm... “Squeal or No Squeal”? Waka Waka! Apparently, Howie thought there might have been a sexual assault in progress, so he called 911. The cops came and found a man and a woman, both 21 years old, in the bathroom. Turns out it was consensual. This is crazy…first off… 21? Howie if 56! Getting down with the younger kids huh Howie? Plus…isn’t Howie a germaphobe? This must drive him nuts!

So Howie Mandel caught 2 people having sex in his bathroom…based on this…when have you caught someone in the middle of the “act”? Where were you? Here are some of the texts we got:

On the bank of mineral lake while fishin.

In the Mosh pit during Hole. Took everything I had to keep them from bumping in to me

In a car outside of a party by a son of a cop who was in the process of becoming a cop with a girl that he was in love withyou (my girlfriend) . He did the "cop knock" with a police issue flashlight.

Working at a movie theater. I've caught many people having sex. Once in the bathroom, 4 times in the theater and too many times in our parking lot.

At a friend house. . . My bestfriend/fwb for very long time. Long time as in we were like family kind long time. At my friend house we were just chillin drinkin and that night was me and her day but she went behind my back and fooled around with other friend

I caught my best friend and my brother-in-law getting it on in a bar parking lot in someone else's car......

I was so effing hammered that when i finally came to............I caught MYSELF banging my ex-girlfriend in my car!!! What the eff!!

I got busted saturday night having kinky zombie sex on the ferry after the zombie walk in fremont. Guy just looked disturbed!

So I work for a school district I found two teachers finf in a classroom

Speaking of sex… Yahoo recently figured out approximate calorie counts for the various sex acts.

-Making Out, 30 minutes: 230 calories for men and women
-Foreplay, 20 minutes: 87 calories for women, 107 calories for men
-Strip Tease: 60 Calories for either that is doing the tease
-Oral “negotiations”: 100 calories for women
-Missionary Position, 10 minutes: 250 calories for men
-Woman on Top, 10 minutes: 300 calories for women, 130 calories for men.
-Sex Standing Up: Up to 600 calories for both people.
-“Alone time”: Up to 150 calories per session.
-Big “O”: From 60-100 calories

A new survey asked people to name the one trip they've dreamed of their entire life . . . here are the top five.

1. A cruise around the world.
2. Visiting all seven continents, including Antarctica.
3. Sailing the Mediterranean on a private yacht.
4. Visiting all Seven New Wonders of the World. (Taj Mahal in India, Chichen Itza in Mexico, the Christ the Redeemer statue in Brazil, the Colosseum in Rome, the Great Wall of China, Machu Picchu in Peru, and Petra in Jordan.)
5. Going on an African safari and photographing the "big five" . . . the lion, leopard, rhino, elephant, and African buffalo.

The survey also found Australia is the number one dream destination . . . Hawaii is the top dream family getaway . . . and Paris is the top romantic city.

What about you? What is your lifelong dream vacation? Here are the texts we got:

Round the world cruse on the queen Mary 2. It's designed like a classic ocean liner, plus it goes to hot and cold places so there is something for everybody.

Funny thing is, Id like to take a trip through Steves imagination...what a tripped out, twisted, screwed up place thatd be. Perfect Vaca for this cublical driver.

Eastern Europe. Having seen most of the world in the Navy and college, I have yet to see the east block. Czech beer is supposed to be amazing.

Calgary, preferably during the Stanley cup finals with the flames playing.... And winning... Love Chadd

All inclusive week at The Bunny Ranch.

Dream vacation- a month on a deserted island with a sailboat a beautiful lady, pound of high grade weed & a 50 gallon barrel of pirate rum and a fishing pole. ;{

The best trip for me would be flying down to Peru to meet up with like minded people and a shaman to take a DMT trip with auyasca. Apparently it's a healing and soul searching experience while being able to explore the country and maybe try some of those coca leaves everyone is always jacked up on!! The total cost for room & board, 5 nights, flight and sight seeing would cost 1900.

A playoff game at Lambeau Field. Im a diehard Packers fan. Jimmy the Produce Guy

An American road trip. From washington state to new York, down to Florida, over to California, back up to Washington. MURICA!

Today's video blog features a couple guests that came in from Utah, and they brought gifts!