Brazil 1 - 0 Croatia

Kaka 44

Mike Adamson

Tuesday June 13, 2006

It's not just the Brazilian footballers that are the best in the world...

Preamble
Hello everyone. Its not been the best day of football, but forget the Sunday league kickabout that went on in Frankfurt this afternoon and the bore draw in Stuttgart earlier this evening, because tonight in Berlin the World Cup starts for real as the favourites kick off their campaign. As you can see from the photo in the top right-hand corner of this page, everyones getting into the spirit of things. None more so than Croatia defender Stjepan Tomas, who was pictured having a cheeky pint less than 48 hours before this game.

Croatia can get a point from this game (no, really)
Ok, so its highly unlikely, but consider this. Their team has a nice blend of youth (eg Dario Srna, 23) and experience (eg Igor Tudor, 84); they mix a strong defence (six clean sheets in 10 qualifying matches) with a fluid midfield and attack; last year they drew with Brazil in Split; and the Brazilians, burdened by the kind of expectations that Charles Dickens liked to write about, usual betray their nerves in the opening game. But if pushed, Id still have to go for a 2-1 victory to the world champions.

Brazil boss Carlos Alberto Parreira names the side he said he would a month ago  its bursting to the seams with attacking talent, but it does leave me wondering one thing: why is winger Ze Roberto preferred to Gilberto Silva and Juninho as a holding midfielder? Despite Fifa saying players can now take drinks during the game, Tomas misses out for Croatia, his place going to Simic. Their team is built for Niko Kranjcar to excel in the hole behind the two strikers, a player who is not only the son of the coach Zlatko but has also been dubbed, rather predictably, the Croatian Zidane.

An answer of sorts
"I have no idea why the Croatian player supports West Brom, but I do know that right now Google pulls up 25,600 results for 'Crouchinho'," says Julia Kite.

A quote bringing back unhappy memories from my English degree
"'Take nothing on its looks; take everything on evidence. There's no better rule,'" taps in Jeffrey Garrett, echoing Dickens in Great Expectations. Now how would we interpret that for tonight's game?

Spooky
"Gary Lineker's just told the nation that (BBC presenter who is in the stadium) Adrian Chile's mother is Croatian," observes Mark Lloyd. "Clearly it's going to be a special night for Baggies fans." Adrian Chile is a West Brom fan, you see. And they're called the Baggies - just in case anyone was struggling.

A plea that shall be ignored
"The Brazilian fantasia photo is wonderful, but couldnt you go with something more benign like, say, a photo of a toilet," requests David Smith. "My co-workers will think Im not only a slacker, but also a pervert, if I have that picture on my screen for the next two hours."

Watch out for the ref
He's Mexican, like the useless self-obsessed twerp who officiated over England's game. Let's hope Senor Tellez is less keen on making a name for himself.

1 min
And we're off. There's a real buzz around the stadium, a stadium where Brazil might be returning in a month's time for the final.

2 mins
The first shot of the game is a highly ambitious attempt from Roberto Carlos with his right foot. Yes, his right foot. Not surprisingly, it's high, wide and ugly.

4 mins
The first flowing move from Brazil raises the crowd to an almost orgasmic frenzy, but in the end nobody can reach Ze Roberto's cut-back. We're in for a good night.

6 mins
"The only problem with the picture is that it's too small," says Wesley Lagerwey, whose name has Stjepan Tomas's ears pricking up. "The crowd demands more!"

8 mins
Croatia win a corner with their first attack of note, Prso playing the ball off Lucio...

9 mins
Dida claims the corner well, then sets off a rapid counter-attack which sees five Brazilians racing forward. Within 10 seconds Kaka is shooting, but the execution is poor.

11 mins
"Go Croatia!" says Brook Davis, who is about to embark on a rant methinks. "I'm sick of seeing so many football pundits become Brazil groupies whenever the 'Magical Quartet' is mentioned. Aren't they upset by the obvious arrogance of this nation of divers and aesthetes? You can be sure that Brazilian pundits wouldn't be worshipping England like this if their respective World Cup wins were reversed."

13 mins
Croatia will be pleased with their start - their keeper Pletikosa has barely touched the ball so far.

14 mins
"I believe that photo was taken from the movie Blame it on Rio," says Peter Donley. Sounds like the Sun's future reaction to England's elimination from this tournament. "Starring a very young Demi Moore. If Im not mistaken, wouldnt that be Michael Caine in the lower right-hand corner?"

15 mins
Like London buses, you wait for a Pletikosa save for 15 minutes, then two come along at once. First he tips over Carlos's long-range drive, then he dives down to his left to palm away Ronaldinho's curler.

16 mins
"For reasons you don't necessarily need to know about, the Croatia Subbuteo team is sitting here next to me, inside a shopping bag from The Container Store," says Paul Carek, who really does need to get out more. "Do you think this means Brazil will 'contain' Croatia this evening? I reckon it does. Of course, if I were to remove said team from the bag, all bets are off."

18 mins
Cafu is playing his 139th game for Brazil tonight. I ask you, is that funny? No? No, I don't think so either. So why did Beeb commentator John Motson insist on chuckling after mentioning the fact? Corner for Croatia...

19 mins
The Brazilians are looking surprisingly organised at the back, evidenced by Juan's clearance of the set-piece.

20 mins
"Who should I be rooting for, given the fact that my wife is Croatian and she has a braz..." that'll do thanks, Marc Currid. We won't go there.

22 mins
Excellent tackle from Juan as Nico Kovac was charging down the right. A dangerous situation was arising.

23 mins
"That Brazilian pundits wouldn't be lining up to worship England because England is not even close to as talented as Brazil," says Miriti Murungi, who has a point. "Although Crouchaldinho would surely give all the Ronnies and Adriano a run for their money for the starting line-up if he were Brazilian, and if the starting line-up was for a totem pole look-a-like contest."

24 mins
Niko Kranjcar enters the fray for the first time, picking the ball up in midfield before sauntering forward and, as the Brazilians back off, firing a couple of feet wide. Given the way Dida played for Milan in the Champions League this season, Croatia should try shooting from anywhere.

27 mins
Kranjcar has a pop from distance again, and wins Croatia another corner as it deflects off one of those bright yellow shirts. But he needn't have bothered trotting over to the corner because was on hand to head it clear yet again.

28 mins
"25,600 hits for Crouchinho?" scoffs Andrew Goudie. "Pah! His Liverpool team-mate Caradonna gets a cool 215,000 pages. (But Ithink most of them have nothing to do with football)."

30 mins
As Niko Kovac decides to rest on the floor for a moment pretending he's been fouled by Adriano, the two teams sprint over to the touchline for a quick drink. Now I know I've already made this joke (twice), but if only Stjepan Tomas etc and so on.

32 mins
Kaka and Ronaldo play a little one-two on the edge of the area, but the Milan midfielder fails to make the return after being tugged back by Kovac. Kovac is booked for his protests - which are ludicrous - and now Ronaldinho is eyeing up the free-kick...

33 mins
But his attempt is more disappointing than the movie The Da Vinci Code, blocked by the wall as it is.

35 mins
"Surely the best part of that admittedly brilliant photo is the guy in the yellow shirt whose excitement has reached the stage that he has had to bring out the full-fledged exhalation with puffed out cheeks. Something which, I'm almost positive, was followed by a comment beginning with the words, 'Check out the... and ended with, 'On that.'" So says the astute Stuart Youngs.

36 mins
Croatia are briefly down to 10 men as Kovac is helped off the pitch. He's just been on the receiving end of two tough tackles, both of which did more than just tickle his ribs.

38 mins
Now then, Croatia have a free-kick just outside the left edge of the penalty area. Srna, the "Croatian David Beckham" of course, is over it...

39 mins
His delivery is worthy of Becks, the Brazilians are left standing by the penalty spot, but Igor Tudor is unable to reach the ball by the smallest of margins. Otherwise it would have been a certain goal.

40 mins
Cafu tries a shot from the corner of the box, but it's comfortable for Petikosa.

41 mins
Sub for Croatia: captain Niko Kovac is forced out of the game; he's replaced by Jerko Leko.

42 mins
"Actually, I think the guy in the top-right of the photo has dropped his bus-ticket and is wondering how to get it back," says Glenn.

43 mins
It's been a very niggly performance from Emerson in the first half, and finally he is booked after his fourth or fifth foul. Brazil are struggling here.

GOAL! Brazil 1 - 0 Croatia (Kaka 44)
They're not struggling anymore! What a goal from Kaka! Receiving the ball from Cafu about 25 yards out, he swung his left foot at it, looked up, and saw it arc around Pletikosa's flailing right hand into the top corner.

Half time
Ronaldinho, Adriano and Ronaldo have barely had a kick between them, but the fourth member of their treasured quartet, Kaka, has ensured that Brazil go in a goal up. Croatia can feel aggrieved by the half-time scoreline, but you sense it will be difficult for them to change their approach in the second half if they have to start chasing the game.

Over to you
"On evidence of that picture, remind me next time Brazil are playing Ireland in a friendly to get a ticket amongst the Brazil fans rather than fellow Paddys," says Ross Carroll. "We are one hell of a sorry looking bunch in comparison."

"The most puzzling aspect of the photo is the clapping, bearded man directly to the left and just behind the Brazilian belle," writes Andre Ghione. "His eyes are fixed decidedly away from the action - all that could possibly be in his sightline are the meaty paws of the two men supporting the Samba Queen."

"Honestly," sighs Howard Davies. "It's amazing how a little Photoshop can fool people. Obviously that's a photograph of the Guardian Unlimited minute-by-minute staff with Georgina Turner in the centre, Paul Doyle on the lower right, I suspect that's Barry Glendenning over her right shoulder and probably Mike Adamson on the lower left?" I'm saying nothing.

"All this crap about Brazil being so talented  the absolute only reason that they have such a good record is that the tournament is always held in the summer, when its too hot for us," says Martin Steinson. "If it was staged in December in England we would win it every time."

46 mins
Here we go again then. Will Brazil improve in the second half? Will Ronaldo shed an ounce or two? "If you try to search for Beckhaminho, Google asks if you really meant 'Beckhaming'," says Julia. "I didnt know there was a verb form, 'to Beckham'. What could it mean?"

48 mins
Croatia set up camp in the Brazil half for the first three minutes, but are unable to get close enough to goal to have a shot.

49 mins
"Photoshop or not, with that picture of Georgina nowseared into my memory, you might as well start callingme Paul Willow," says Tyler Barnett. "Or Paolo, if she likes theMediterranean type."

50 mins
This is really encouraging for Croatia. Prso showed great control, strength and shooting prowess as he took in Simic's long pass, shrugged off Lucio and brought about a decent save from Dida at his near post.

52 mins
Another tester for Dida as Klasnic fired off a rasper from 20 yards. If that had been a yard either side of the keeper he'd have stood no chance.

54 mins
"Dennis Bergkamp's decision to retire from international football now looks entirely understandable judging by that photo," giggles Lee. "The lad deserves to let his hair down I reckon."

56 mins
He may not be able to run these days, but he sure can still strike a ball. Collecting Kaka's short pass, Ronaldo opened up and smacked the ball with great force just over the crossbar.

57 mins
Sub for Croatia: Klasnic off, Olic on.

58 mins
Kaka, who continues to lead the Brazil attack, wins a free-kick to the left of the penalty area. Ronaldinho and Robert Carlos are both rather excited...

59 mins
Ronaldinho curls it in but a Croatian defender jumps higher than anyone else to keep his team in the game.

60 mins
"www.rooninho.co.uk is still available," says Ian King. "This could be a bargain if he were to score against Brazil. Not that we'll get that far, of course."

61 mins
I may not be Prso's biggest fan, but I have to admit that he's probably been the most influential of the four strikers on show this evening. It takes three Brazilian defenders to end his latest powerful bundle towards the penalty area.

63 mins
Right-back Cafu, in his more accustomed right-wing position, floats a brilliant cross to Ronaldinho at the far post, but the great man's header is fisted away by Pletikosa.

64 mins
"To Beckham (apologies to the OED)," says lexicologist Chris. "1) to make a mute signal that one wants a slice of pork; 2) to wag one's finger derisively at an overtheatrical lout."

66 mins
Robert Kovac is the latest name to be taken by the referee for a trip on Ze Roberto on the halfway line. "Klasnicoff?" says Jeff wittily, if somewhat belatedly. "Are Croatia bringing out the big guns?"

67 mins
A great chance for Croatia! Olic ran free down the left, elected not to square for Srna for an easy tap-in, but still could have scored himself - sadly his shot was misshit and Dida saved with his feet.

69 mins
Sub for Brazil: Ronaldo off to howls of derision from the crowd; Robinho on. It will be very interesting to see if Ronaldo keeps his place for the Australia game on Sunday. He's done next-to-nothing to merit it.

70 mins
Dida has been like a magnet to the ball tonight, and it's just as well for Brazil. Again their defence parted like a certain coloured sea, but Babic's shot went straight at the fortunate keeper.

72 mins
Kaka almost repeats his first-half heroics, but with his right foot this time. Pletikosa was relieved to see that shot go wide.

74 mins
Robinho tries an ambitious shot which bounces across goal, leaving the net at Adriano's mercy, but somehow the striker sidefoots wide. Croatia are still in this.

75 mins
"If you type Beckham in to wiktionary.org, it tells you that the word Beckham has an 18.3% relevancy to the phrase 'sex on legs'," says Marc Callcutt. "But perhaps of more interest is that Rooney has a 7.5% relevancy to the word 'vegetarian'. Any explanations?"

77 mins
The Croats seem to be tiring as Brazil keep possession. The main reason that Brazil always have a good defensive record is not because they have good defenders, but because the opposition rarely gets enough of the ball to trouble them.

79 mins
Ronaldinho is lining up a free-kick in a similar position to that from which he scored against England in the last World Cup...

80 mins
But it's Roberto Carlos who takes it, so obviously the Croatian goal ends up in no danger.

82 mins
Referring to the email in 75 mins, Tom writes helpfully, "Thats probably from a quote by American curmudgeon Andy Rooney - 'vegetarian ... thats an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter'."

84 mins
It's very scrappy at the moment. Croatia look spent, while Brazil are happy to settle for a one-goal win. As many of you are asking, will the British journalists be as scathing about Brazil's performance as they were about England's? I doubt it.

86 mins
Why can we never have an old-fashioned contested bounced-ball these days? After a stoppage due to a streaker - a rubbish one who was wearing a Croatia shirt - the Brazilians stood off expecting Croatia to give the ball back, but they paused because they didn't know if they should. Eventually they just booted it out of play. Farcical.

88 mins
On the edge of the box, Prso swivels and dinks a cross into the box. Untracked by Brazil's midfield, Kranjcar times his run onto the ball perfectly, but then makes a Horlicks of his header at goal.

89 mins
There's flares going off among the Croatia fans. They're much happier than their Brazilian counterparts. Even if they are going to lose, they've shown enough to encourage the belief they might beat Japan and Australia to second place.

90 mins
Igor Tudor is booked for a bodycheck on Robinho. There will be two minutes of injury time.

90 mins + 1
Ronaldinho concedes a needless foul on Srna, giving Croatia one last chance to load the box. Srna himself will take the free-kick...

90 mins + 2
But as he has done so many times tonight, Juan heads the ball away and that will surely be that.

Full time
And it is. Both teams will go away satisfied with their night's work: despite an indifferent performance, Brazil will be happy to have three points on the board, while Croatia will be confident they can still make the second round if they can repeat that showing. Thanks for your emails, Mike.