Hondo was a dismal 1-3 in the title games but would have been 2-2 if the Colts and refs hadn’t been such sticklers for the rules. After Tom Brady’s balls were reinflated at halftime, Bill Belichick went from Air Pats to Ground Blount, which effectively killed Mr. Aitch’s play on the over.

Nevertheless, Hondo is confident he will make amends in the Supe, a game in which he has cashed in 6-of-the-last-7, so you might want to think twice before contradicting him on Sunday.

All together now, “Take Me Out To The Balls Game … ”

Patriots-Seahawks: It’s BeastMode against CheatMode — an à la mode matchup made in Super Bowl heaven. Had the Patriots not been caught wreaking havoc on the rule book. Mr. Aitch might advise you to put your balls in their court. However, with all eyes on the Bel’ of the Balls, it’s going to be tough to engage in any nefarious Patriot acts.

Meanwhile, one team’s Deflategate has become the other team’s Elategate. As the nation focuses its venomous eyes to the Patriots, the scandalous Seahawks, who are the league leaders in PED suspensions since 2010, have escaped all scrutiny. Leave it to The Hoodie to turn Pete Carroll, who skulked away from USC, and the Seahawks into the game’s good guys.

Larry Linemaker sees this as a super tight tussle but is neglecting an important factor. After the Seahags improbable comeback against the Packers, Russell Wilson, who was so bad the devoted 12th Man made an early run for the parking lot, explained how he went from bum to stud in the final minutes: “That’s God setting it up, to make it so dramatic, so rewarding” — and so devastating for Green Bay. Evidently the Packers had a falling out with The Big Guy after their five titles in the ’60s. But Hondo digresses; the point is, according to Wilson, God is now a fan of the crotch-grabbing group performance enhancers.

It remains to be seen what effect full inflation of their balls will have on the Pats. Hondo is predicting they will lose the iron grip they have had on the football in recent years and Brady will unleash some errant throws, both of which will be game-changers against the Legionnaires. Seattle’s suffocating red-zone defense will keep Stephen Gostkowski busy, which means there will be some deflated Patriot legacies by 10 p.m. Sunday. Seahawks 26-19

The way Hondo sees it, whomever is responsible for the Patriots’ deflationary tactics — Bill Belichick, Tom Brady, or maybe mysterious team operative Ernie Adams? — not only violated a league rule but also one of the cardinal rules of manhood: Never get caught messing around with your balls.

Professor Belichick’s most salacious comments from his press conference Saturday: “We prepare our balls over time;” “I’ve handled dozens of balls over the past week;” “The texture of the balls is very easy to identify;” and “The balls reached an equilibrium without the rubbing process.” If he’s going to carry on like that, he should hold his press conferences late at night.

Gisele Bundchen has submitted several prayer petitions on behalf of her husband for Sunday. Among them: Because Tommy can’t deflate the balls and throw the balls and catch the balls, pray for Tommy’s balls to be just right; Pray for Tommy’s sniffles to go away; and pray for mean people to stop hurting Tommy’s feelings. Amen!

HondoNation notable picks

Mrs. Aitch: Seahawks 21-15;Hondo’s First Heir: Patriots 38-24;Hondo’s Second-But-Equal Heir: Seahawks 31-21;BarkingMut: Patriots 27-23 (and you can take that to the snow bank, he says);Emauler Ed Buckmir: Patriots 26-20;Mick Buckmir (the P.I. who came in from the cold): Patriots 27 (psi 13.5 x 2), Seahawks 25 (Psi 12.5 x 2);Siciliano (aka The Bronx Bomber): Patriots 43-9;
The great golf pro Bill Maloney (the only one in this paragraph who picked the Seahawks to win outright last year): Seahawks 28-21;DonnyMac: Patriots 31-27;William DiMarco 24-13;K-Dog of Md.: Deflatriots 34-21.

Celebrity picks

BILL DE BLASIO: Patriots — the Seahawks have no red in their uniform.THE ACADEMY OF MOTION PICTURE ARTS AND SCIENCES: Whichever team is wearing white.THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE: Run for your lives! The worst dust storm in the history of deserts will blow through Phoenix starting at 6:30 p.m.BRUCE JENNER (aka Bruce Gender): Nobody knows more about the effects of deflating balls than I do. Patriots.MICHAEL MOORE: Surely not the Patriots. Pass me that plate of nachos, will ya?

In other areas pertinent to HondoNation …

With NBC’s Savannah Guthrie having landed the pre-Super Bowl interview with President Obama, it should be fun to watch some softball before football.

Steve Kroft, meanwhile, who allegedly said he was Obama’s go-to interviewer, intends to sit back and enjoy the big game with some wings and a couple of glasses of his favorite BSC — butt-strained champagne.

Emailer Robert Buckwater predicts Kroft, having watched the Allison Williams butt-cleansing episode, will leave “60 Minutes” and try out for a role on “Girls.”

Leave it to P.I. Mick Buckmir to explain how someone could deflate 11 of 12 balls to the perfect psi in a bathroom in 90 seconds: That’s plenty of time to empty a bladder, flush, and pull the old switch-a-roo with a bag of replacement balls that were stashed in there.

Two from BarkingMut of SoBe, the HondoNation Southern Bureau Chief: Given the Deflategate-mania that is sweeping the nation, sources say a new TV series is in the works about forensic detectives who investigate air pressure in footballs in the Boston area, which will be titled, “PSI: New England.”… The Patriots’ offense can now be referred to as Ground and Minus-2 Pounds.

Virginia Roberts, one of predator Jeffrey Epstein’s underage prostitutes, said she didn’t see Epstein pal Bill Clinton having sex with any of the girls. It would be remarkable if he didn’t, considering he reportedly was on a “sex plane” to “Orgy Island” with several of Epstein’s girls. … Then again, perhaps he was teaching them how to enjoy a good cigar without lighting up.

Irish Health Cabinet Minister Leo Varadkar emerged from his closet recently. Apparently, Leo felt the need to inform the world where he likes to park his shillelagh.

Rumor has it Hillary Clinton may not run after all because she doesn’t want to run the risk of being “dead broke” again when she leaves the White House … Mick Buckmir, elder half of the Brothers Buckmir, predicts Pantsuit psi will be a hot topic for HondoNation in the coming months.

Ed Buckmir notes blowhard Michael Moore took some shots at “American Sniper” and laments it wasn’t the other way around.

So New York and New Jersey panicked and overreached by shutting down subways, trains, bridges and roads for what amounted to a 6-inch snowstorm. Clearly, Mother Nature outfoxed Mother Nation. … What do Al Roker’s weather forecast and his underwear have in common? They’re both full of crap.