In case you didn’t notice last week, I was kind of recovering from a Cracken Bender. Like, most of the time, I kind of enjoy making fun of Lindsay Lohan just because A) she deserves it because she’s the least sympathetic person ever (aside from actual war criminals) and B) in her crack-addled mind, she KNOWS she’s incredibly awesome, so what does it even matter? So… I needed a little break, and CB covered LL’s appearance on Glee- which, from what I gather, was barely two minutes of cracked-out timing and dumb jokes. So, considering that LL’s “comeback” is in full swing and that Lifetime “Liz & Dick” monstrosity is due to begin filming in two weeks or so, how is Lindsay spending her time? Why, she’s sitting at home, soberly reading her Bible. Just kidding, she’s partying until 7 am with Paris Hilton, and the party only ends when the cops come.

They both have long-standing reputations as Hollywood wild ones. And Paris Hilton, 31, and Lindsay Lohan, 25, didn’t do themselves any favours after attending a raucous party at a LA home until the early hours of Saturday morning.

Police were called to the Hollywood Hills residence after neighbours filed a noise complaint, according to onlookers. Paris was spotted leaving the property wearing dark sunglasses and a cap along with her friend, oil heir Brandon Davis.

Lindsay is understood to have made an undercover exit, hiding under a towel in the back seat of a friend’s car.

Lindsay and Paris are clearly on good terms again after a spectacular feud dating back to 2006, when the hotel heiress and Brandon crudely nicknamed her Firecrocth. The Mean Girls actress has been attempting to resuscitate her flagging career and recently made a guest appearance on Glee. But she reported to be a ‘total nightmare’ on the set of the hit show – which stars Lea Michele, Corey Monteith and Matthew Morrison – because she turned up late and did not know her lines.

Meanwhile Paris, who is dating DJ Afrojack, has been inspired to try a career change by her new beau. She will debut her DJ set in Sao Paulo, Brazil on June 23 in front 30,000 people. She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez.

Wait, what? “She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez.” As in, Jennifer Lopez and Kelly Clarkson are opening for… Paris Hilton? That can’t be right. As for the partying and such… of course. Why do Paris and Lindsay keep circling each other like the last crackies eyeing up the last crack rock? I get that they have “similar interests” and probably the same number of brain cells. But for God’s sake… I feel like this is 2006 all over again.

By the way, remember photographer Tyler Shields, the dude who took all of those crazy photos of The Cracken playing with a gun? Well, he did a new photo shoot with Lindsay for Vault Magazine – the photos haven’t been released yet, but part of Tyler’s interview has been excerpted. Isn’t that funny? Lindsay isn’t interviewed – Tyler Shields is. Oh, and Shields is a douche. He tells Vault, “People said she (Lindsay) was unstable, so I decided to show them what they were already believing, what they already chose to see.” He also says, “I’m not a label. I’m not a fashion. I’m not a celebrity…I’ll buy a Ferrari and blow it up. I come across so many people who are afraid to live. I want to give them a window to another world. I don’t believe in fear.” For goodness sake. You know who was a truly fearless photographer? The late Tim Hetherington. Tyler Shields is just a hack regurgitating pop culture clichés, and he thinks that’s somehow groundbreaking. It’s not.

Well, teorically I can…but I don’t even try anymore because the internet connection here (specifically in the neighbourhood where I live) is really shitty so whenever I want to watch something online via streaming (like South Park, for instance) it keeps showing that “buffering” sign.

P.S.: South Park is available in TWO channels here (Comedy Central and VH1) but BOTH channels show the dubbed version — which I hate to no end. And I can’t even choose which version I want to watch, like I do with The Simpsons.

Hi Rita! I’m pretty sure the Bible is above her reading level. Unless it’s one of those kindergarten ones, with lots of pictures that tell the stories. (Which, by the way, I think it would be hilarious listening to her explanation of what was going on in said pix.)

The dress is horrible but the face is worse!! She is a rough looking 25 year old. She looks like a 50 year old has been hooker and needs to go away…Please, both her and Paris need to call it day and just go away. It’s so over for both of them. But, in the looks department Lilo is just gone. And, if she looks like this at 25 imagine what she will look like in another 5-10 years..that is if she makes it. :/ I don’t know if I feel sorry for her or not.

Lindsey was probably just at the party trying to get everyone to stop drinking and drugging. She was so sincere in wanting to rid the room of booze and drugs she drank every last beverage and snorted every last line so she could help everyone stay off the bad shit. What a saint!!!!

I don’t understand her at all. But this is the face of substance abuse. People that are addicts are not able to really function. They can hold it together for a bit but they always slip back. She is getting some good opportunities and her behavior is endangering her from getting more. If she messes up on that Liz movie, I think a lot of doors will be closed for her.

Sorry, but your comment that addicts always slip back is not true. Yes, it is VERY difficult for an addict not to slip, but it can be done! But…YOU HAVE TO WORK AT IT AND YOU HAVE TO WANT IT!!! If Lindsey truly wanted sobriety she wouldn’t be going to parties and clubs. I’m working on two and half years of sobriety, and it took changing my attitude and my lifestyle…not saying I may never slip again…its one day at a time…but Lindsey doesn’t even try!

Lucy, happy 2.5 years! I hope many more are to come.
I am coming up on 7 years clean. I am just about to finish my Masters in Archeology. It takes diligence and finding something else to focus your time and energy. I still get cravings sometimes but I think about how far I’ve come and work past it. You’ve made it this far, I hope you keep going.

Yes! And let’s have Kim Kartrashian go with them. So hard to believe how and why these nitwits are relevant. I guess it’s like my mama used to say “no one’s totally worthless…some people make excellent ‘bad examples’ that you don’t want to follow!”

Because that’s all she has to do each day. She claims to be so hard working and a “businesswoman” but her work seems to consist of traveling all over the world smiling, talking in the baby voice, and partying. It’s probably not too tiring when you can sleep all you want and “work” means hitting the play button on a computer as a DJ.

2 flakes that continue to prove to me money cannot buy happiness, common sense, or apparently time w/ their hair stylists (yuck those awful roots and fake looking extensions)… And apparently favors do not pay the dentist either in Lohans case, those teeth just seem too big for her mouth.

I was watching the end of Christopher Guest’s movie For Your Consideration the other night on tv.

At the end of the movie Catherine O’Hara’s character goes overboard when she’s nominated for an award and goes all Hollywood with plastic surgery. Blond extensions, cheek fillers, plumped up lips and fake boobs. I was amazed she looked so much like LL does now and that movie was made back in 2006.

I love that movie, but Catherine O’Hara’s character is really tragic. I guess the difference between her and Lindsay is the the CO character worked really hard and it amounted to nothing, while LL doesn’t work at all, and yet people continue to do cartwheels to support and celebrate her.

So Lilo, Paris AND Greasy Bear have all had cocaine related arrests. They’re up ’til 7 am partying? Hmmm… Oh, Memorial Day is coming up. Doesn’t one of them usually get a DUI or go to rehab this time of year?

Every time I read stories of her partying, I flash back to her telling Matt Lauer what a homebody she is, with a straight face. One, I can’t believe she thinks people buy that, and two, Matt Lauer sucks as an interviewer – he didn’t even press her on it.

I was surprised to see an article this morning in my local Sunday newspaper (actual print addition)(I live in Pa.)about how everyone close to Liz and her fans are against Lilo playing her. Apparently the producers has been bombed with nasty emails from ppl all over telling him she shouldnt be the one to play her, some even calling him an idiot..lol
He said there were a few supportive ones, not many tho, so Im assuming they were all from Dina and Ali. His cover-up response about their similarities is laughable. he should just come right out say its a publicity stunt and that they need the rating otherwise they would use someone with actual talent or at the very least a similar appearance.

its like shes searching for some kind of “feeling” which is why she keeps reverting back to the partying. she cant seem to figure out. in that regard i feel a little sorry for her, seems like an unfulfilling and sad existence. i also notice that she complains about the all the negative attention that she gets yet she keeps doing these silly photo shoots , inviting the papparazzi into her life, going to “star magazine” events and doing TMZ interviews. I really get the sense from watching her that she’s really messed up its almost like she gets off on the humiliation…..

When the court ordered her into UCLA inpatient psych treatment a few years ago, they let her go way early…which suggests that she either snowed them, they’re incompetent, or she is not ill enough to require long-term or intensive treatment. It boggles the mind…but so did the judge saying she was suspending her drug testing because she didn’t believe Lindsay was an addict. What the what?

I don’t get it either. She is obviously mentally ill. One only has to look at her to see that something is wrong with her. Drugs have really messed her up. I guess California just doesn’t want to deal with it. But, the woman needs help. At this point I think she has done permanent damage to her brain and it shows.

What the hell is wrong with Lohan’s forehead? It’s a completely different color. Botox? Cover up for something else? I also noticed two strips on the sides of her upper nose. Nose job?
She looks ghastly.

OMG this post just made me take a second look at her nose. How odd..This poor girl just looks so bad. She was a cute kid but now should be shown to people to show them why they shouldn’t do drugs. She is totally fried inside and out. Looking at her is actually freaking me out. Girl needs help really badly.

Yes lucy2 and we work hard for our little money and this twit presses play and rakes in thousands,not fair,; I thought the people in brazil had better musical taste; surely they don’t regard Paris as an “artist”; is paris that big of a draw in the club scene? Sorry to say but that’s embarassing, not into that kind of music. BTW, I’m reminded of Tom Petty’s comment about computers and music wherein he stated that if this is the way music is going, just give the awards to the computers.

Anytime I hear about these two being BFF’s again, I always immediately suspect Hilton is up to something… She sees Lohan’s career experiencing a little momentum now, plus Lohan’s attempt to clean up her act (at least on the surface) and suddenly Paris is her party pal again. I can totally see her being jealous, seeing as her own “career” is in the shitter… and Hilton taking pleasure in dragging Lohan back into the gutter as a way to sabotage what little credibility Lohan has scraped together as of late.

They are both washed up and looking really fug at this point. In the one pick with Paris looking head on that double chin is AWFUL. Shes not a pretty girl anyway and never was.
Regarding whats wrong with them…..as some of you have puzzled…yes, LL is bi-polar, a very serious mental illness. There is no cure. However if she took her medication and accepted intensive therapy she could improve….but its a never ending uphill struggle with lots of “falling off the wagon.”
As to whats paris’s problem…..whatever is wrong with her aunt I think is whats wrong with her….which is low IQ and some sort of generic addiction problem mixed in with a ridiculous streak of being stupidly overly confident for no reason what so ever. Paris failed out of high school. She doesnt even have a high school diploma. I once heard her admit that she is not that smart. I felt sorry for her at the time. Now, at this point i dont anymore because she has done nothing with her life. Nothing constructive. She has lots of opportunity. You dont need to be a brainiac to start up a charity or a great business. She is basically a stupid rich young woman that just wants to do blow, get paid and party. Shes not going to age well. Look at her aunt to see her future. pretty sad. What a pair these two make.

I have to say, I’m so glad we’re past the Paris stage…all we saw was Paris pushed in our faces, and now we are having to go through and somehow endure the horrible Kardashian period…Lohan looks a bit wasted in these pics. She doesn’t seem to be doing that well in coming to terms with a functional program. Does this mean she will always be living on the brink of excess and inability to control herself? If you’re doing crack for years on end, isn’t your nose eventually ruined?

Why is Liho wearing a “bobbie” pin in her hair at this function? That dress is awful! Paris looks like a grinning fool. I agree that “Liz and Dick” is using cracken for publicity and will find a way to drop her after the outrage dies down.

Well, well, well..the dynamic duo is back! Firecrotch and Ms. Immaho, partying till 7 a.m………hmmmmmm, now what could they POSSIBLY have been doing to stay awake THAT long?! You don’t reckon they were hittin’ the old pipe, do ya? Damn, Blohan looks worse every time I see her….why is she not in jail? I know good and well she couldn’t pass a pee test, I just don’t get it. And Paris is just too damn old to be carrying on like she’s 21……except she’s too frikkin’ stupid to do anything else. Both these self-absorbed idiots are a waste of space and oxygen. And, I hope Lifetime totally loses it’s ass………………