The worst\best answer I've ever got to the question: "What languages do you program in?"
"English"
It turned out he couldn't even name a language. Not one.
I've given up on hiring. It just is not worth the aggravation and anyway, the amount of time spent hiring, I could do the entire job twice myself.
Now, if somebody becomes available, it's like an auction. Basically. I no longer hire people I've not heard of or who does not have a direct reference from someone I know who is a programmer themselves.

I find it difficult to believe, but the reports keep pouring in via Twitter and email: many candidates who show up for programming job interviews can't program. At all. Consider this recent email from Mike Lin: The article Why Can't Programmers... Program? changed the way I did interviews. I ...