The history and future of a utopian marriage of Third Reich idealism and the wonderously vast tapestry of the animal kingdom.

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Unsere Ehre Heisst Beppin

The more I go through the nominations for this years Beppin Cross, the more I remember former Beppians who are no longer a part of our nation. It pains me to think that they are not here to witness the development of Beppin, but their work in the earlier stages of this great land are undoubtably invaluable.

One of the earliest adoptees of Beppin as their homeland was Reichsführer Octavian K. Octopus. I've so many wonderful memories of time spent in Herr Octavian's company, he was instrumental in setting the groundwork for Beppin and for his development of the Beppin SS. Octavian and I spent countless hours formulating ideas and plans for the betterment of our country, and the need for a militant enforcer for Beppin's values became a necessity.

Some of the most powerful divisions of Herr Hitler's forces was the SS. A secret police of sorts, designed to deal with the more pressing issues of the day in a more, lets say, "visceral" capacity. The fear and respect the SS embued was second to none, and Herr Hitler's original model served as a basic model for my own Beppin SS, with some fundamental differences.

Myself and Reichsführer Octavian developed a plan by which we could deal with dissidents and enemies of the state through the development of the SS Überraschung Begraben und Netz policy. Conspirators against Beppin were always a concern to me. I'm a firm believer that individuals who do not fit within our society's structures should be dealt with quickly and efficiently. Beppin is a utopian model of perfection that has been proven.

If someone doesn't want to be a part of Beppin, for any reason, it is in their best interests to move to another place rather than incur the wrath of the Beppin SS. Dissidents come in all shapes and sizes, and sometimes are where you least suspect them. I've seen new residents come to Beppin and settle in beautifully as active and passionate Beppians, only to change overnight into instigators of Anti-Beppin behaviours that they have attempted to use on other residents.

In these situations it dosen't take long for a Beppin SS member to get to find the starting point of these problems and through the Überraschung Begraben und Netzpolicy can deliver punishment quickly and decisively. Of course this policy needs to be controlled by head SS officers and it is not tolerated if an SS member acts without sufficient proof and evidence, lest they be punished themselves.

Outsiders have seen the Beppin SS as being a law unto themselves but this couldn't be further from the truth. Strict policies on acceptable public behaviour ensure that SS members are kind, courteous and respectful of all Beppin's residents and it is firmly embedded in their minds that Beppin's residents are what make it great. Beppin would be nothing without its residents who's values are shared and united.

Unsere Ehre heisst Beppin has always been the SS's motto and it's become a common value for Beppin's residents far and wide. The success of the Beppin SS is something I take great pride in, and when I walk the cobbled streets of Beppin at night on these summer evenings, its brings to mind the friendship and dilligence of Reichsführer Octavian K. Octopus and the tireless work he has done in bringing a new age of prosperity to our nation. I hope to one day see my friend Octavian again, although his work is a constant reminder to me, I long for the day I can visit him again in his moon and space themed house and catch up on old times.

Indeed, visitors to Beppin are carefully screened and interviewed via external means that dosen't put our security at risk. Visitors must be personally entered by myself into the Vorlagenbesucher-Liste which is held at Beppin's gates by Brigadeführer Copper K. Dog.

In the event of an unsavoury visitor passing through this screening process unnoticed, they will be subject to Beppin's Dringlichkeitanfangsschlüssel policy. Upon evidence of behaviours deemed untolerable the offender/s will be unceremoniously ejected from Beppin immediately, and their name will be erased from the Vorlagenbesucher-Liste permanently.

In an case, there are plans for such contingencies, thankfully theres yet to be a case where such exrteme responses have been demanded. All visitors to Beppin thus far have been of exemplary behaviour and have always been a pleasure to host and have had all had their Beppin visa's renewed for future visits.