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it was true ,when it was taking heating it was dificult to say, it is a long position, or why not exit if it goes bad, then i spend some time on thinking on that ,that is not the idea
and today i was made my first trade on s5 , i am planning to hold a short on this supposed top, the main idea is be risk seeking in a winner position, because the natura tendency is to take profit to relief the fear of dissapointment

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

while i was holding the zn ,working bad
but the es what happen was, i let on the table +1000 because comes all the way up, and the risk to a possible b/o to new highs is high%, then i close it for a little win, and i staret making daytrades with es cash, out of plan
really i want to go live, i was calm and comfortable, i trade like in sim, could think and decide very cold, that was good
i was hearing and reading FT71 on S5 , i think the lessons of MP could be usefull for any market(i do not), he only speaks for ES
now i am testing the holding in zn, i would like to hold a short on es well in the money, but maybe it made new highs, and it is better to hold long
why i want to hold long term?, because i think is the only way to not lose the big move, but in the other hand, i do not want to come back agains me, maybe it is imposible
ANd i want to compare the two options, daytrade and hold more time, the problem is the risky entry, if i am entry with low risk, it is dificult to hold the long move,
maybe a combination?long position and hedge for short term?
I have started to trade on S5 live, i i was feeling fantastic, i started with the idea to hold a short position n es to not lose the change in case to go down, but finally i made some trades..i am repeating this..
I am testing 2 strategy, in TS and SC , both sim and try to extract conclusions, alos i have found the A star setup (i need to validate and review again the videos to check it)
and compare the different targets, so and aiao, it looks if i go only for 3 tick could be better, but miss the moves...again
i continue recording all the days, and analizing the videos FastF to learn how can i do this
the MP lesson from ft71 are pending yet, also the book of MP...
the videos from bsdt to review the same
i am finishing the think fast think slow, i thinh help me a lot
and my next book will be swan black or something like that ,i am hearing about it for a lot of places

well now are the 1500 and the news are very good, finally appear a spike big big never seen before and now i am holding a winner... i will be risk seeking now, for a big winner

i continue doing very well in stage 5 live
really i do not undersand how is possible
but it is
maybe i need to wait for the statistic to work

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

I was thinking how start the process, and i think i am not sure was in this way:
1)my plan was not trade on friday, i take time for my kids, for study,
2)in the s5 account i was up 1500 in 2 days
3)i saw the market zn go up crazy and i say, i can t lose this
4)i was thinking , now i have the knowledge to do it, look what i have done with es,zn in s5 live
5)i started to trade ,and win
6)i think what if i increase my risk? 5l , 10 l (i know is crazy increase the risk, but i said, i was having nice winers...i know with more risk ,more psych problem can appear, but i was greed to earn more, and earn quick, and think, i can do it, i forget all th times i have daone similar things, but now i was thinking, o now is diferent, i can reqad the market, i can hold the winner, i can close the loser))
7)i trade 5 lot and win
8i build a position way up adding in up to 6 lots
9) i am watching the top action and then i short 10lot
10)win again, but i was scaed now and i am take 5 lot out quick (i am up +2000 on a day)
11)when i think this is strong up and can reverse in any moment.. and close 5&reverse5
12 continue down
13 i am not close it knowing i have to do it
14 wait
15 i see Sup and add to the loser 5 more
16 continue down
17 i hold the loser
18 down ,up, it give 3 chances to scracht, but in the moment when i can do it, i think, now go up, iand i lose the chance to get this 10 lot up, .....all down again,
19 several times , now i am realizing that i am risking too much & i am holding a loser, but i can not take it the lose
20 i lost all day with this bs...i only focus on this, and
i am down now -3500 (the 1500 of 2 days and the 2000 of today)
i could not think in other thing
i was not available to trade the ES down -42, because i am working /worried in this bs
i was blocking
i was thinking the real possibility to blown the account again
i was thinking how fast the things can change
when i was watching MFE-200, i think ,oh, the expec, now is going to the she..
but with all that things, i am thinking ,unless i am with the trend up, in any moment can have a push up
go 125, if go down i need to close it, bounce, up, not scarcth again, down again, 125, oh now double bottom, bounce
21 i have money only for 5 lot , then i need to close yes or yes 5 lot before the close
22 i went to the doctor, call my daugher 2 times to ask the price....
23 stared again and semiu -paralyzed
24 i go to pick my kid and again waiting,
25 all times without hard stop, i set a target this time to exit but when i out of screen the risk of blown up is real
26 bounce a little bit and i exit 5 lot for loss aprox -1700
27 continue holding 5 lot and i let it open (av.125.10.0, close 125.07.5),
28 i am holding the swing on ts, long, then i now i am holding too much because 2 acount long
29 the possibility for a blown continue because is without stop, according to some charts it looks break tl up, but it looks also bouncing on the upper TL, and if this happens, we can point down...
30 i saw the p/l and i see maybe i can stay in the starting 10000 of 3 days ago...then the damage is not hard, but thinking that i have 13500 and if it i hold the short 10l from 14.5 to 125.00 represente another 4500. i get impressed with that possibility (i want to recover...all my losses/tuition, asap)
but with this levels of risk , it has 0 value , because i can back everything a second

what i have learn?
the risk of myself at work.

the huge different sim test-live

i can read and trade well the first 2 days, but when overconfidence take over , and the decision process get emotional....kill myself

over risk accelerate the process

but all this stuff i know before...

in the first 2 days with s5, why i trade well? the difference i see is the dom only show price, and i can not see the p/l and results, maybe, that way let me trade without thinking in p/l

yesterday i only think p/L with high risk

when i think in the TST combine rules, imaging, if i went from 10000 to 11500, i can not have a draw down from there, and less from 13500...i lost completely the head

Original Plan

i remember the original plan, while i was learniong and practicing, i put an short position in es
-1841
but for the reasons i explain the day 2...finaly i not holding , start to daytrade, i hold long1818, reach 1827, i pull the target, and all way down i stop out, i i lost the sight because the zn problem)

more suffer from this -3500!!

well what was wrong?
1)increse to 5 and to 10
2)not exit quick
3)hold the loser
4)average down
5)hold the loser
6)not stop with +2000
7)trade when i say i will not trade
8)pull the target
9)not to close and become loser
10)not hold the short as i saying

and for what i am doing all the test in sims?and the bloody rules if i act so different live?
when i compare the result of that 2 days in s5 cash, i realize that are more better than the sim plans...but i do not repeat yesterday behaviors.

but the rules i would need to build based on the live beahvior...or not?
what a scramble

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

well, i have heavy bag on, i continue carryieng the losing position with 5long zn, yesterday was near ,and close it to exit with -400, but i let it again all way back down, evidently i lost a lot of opportunities while i am ficghting with this losing position, when go up, i think, yes now it will continue higher...also it is extremely opposited related today to es, es pop up, again go down, es go down, now pop up.
it looks a nice bullflag, but continue down meanwhile.
the swing got down again, in this case i set stop to b/e, bue anyway , to lose 1000 is to lose 1000
and also the lost of opportuniti to trade fresh ideas

whit this baggage, i made trades again in s5, and surprisely ,again, was ok, i am re discovering the es, because i remember was a kbadiller for me, but, i reading well the trend, the pullbacks and the reversal, also i took too much risk in the last trade.(i using only 5min naked chart, 2000 ticks as welly92, nor jigsaw for es, because i have set up for zn)

i am in trouble, and this night i set up a stop in the +5lots, yesterday i did not want to close it at 125000 and this morning it is trading 124.21.0,

when i see the balance acountt to the starting account ,i think, i close now , and i restarted as if nothing happen, but....then i think, what s a pitty, if i can exit at b/e , i can be up nicely this days....

or better, if spikre to 126... ohh, very good,

but all those things are imaginations...not trade

if i want to trade i need to avaoid thats

i promise to me, i close this and this is the last...
tomorrow, i trade different
all this risk it does not make sense

if i got stop out, bad
ig spike up, bad, because next time i see it happen

i think if i exit, i clear the mind and i continue trading

but if better with a less loss as possible

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

i an reviewing my journal and i see i am writing about live trades but this was what happens

i was testing a strategy in SC,last trade 27 ene i write the performance on the journal
and was testing live other more long term in TS, since 27/12
also i do not want to lose the opportunity the bearish appearence in ES and took a short 1841 on s5 acccount on 23 january, and that day started the live test trading again,(i found that i feel the same than in SIM, maybe because on s5 i could not see the P/L, and i can read well the market, and execute without hesistation, surprise myself and decide to continue, live) not only i have started to daytrade ZN, I have re-started to trade ES,? (at first was a test, but I see more and more usefull the overall analisys that ft71 do every day, and how this market works correlated with zn.
Then i officially start a test cash , inmediatly i fall down again with my main issue with the biglosses, live, and i want to overcome this, then continue live to learn to avoid this.(because the main issue appear in live)
I found that ES is more dinamic, and easy to overtrade, I apply to ES the same concepts that zn, fade ranges, pullback, bo, in ES i try to ride adding, i give a punctuation to each trade, according the execution errors( noplan, become a loser, quick close,big lose, let open, and in what context (ct, tt,main trend, last trend, i did, i have an equivalent of 100k and i have set the limits to the downside as a TST 100k combine test,maxDD 3000, daily loss 2000, focus on risk, not big loses, and risk seeking in winners, and let see what happen
i write the performance cash on the journal, on the first week, i made 2 /3 big mistakes big losses and i paid for that, i need to manage that mainly.
i receive a nice feedback on my calls on s5chat , but i destroyed overall with 1/2 big losses. (specially, when i try to stay on the trade more than 1 day, more risk)

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

after the bad week, with the big losses and the bad managed trades, i started the day under the water ,
i was thinking beteween not trade today and cool down , but i think ,maybe today is a big sell off...
this morning instead of study and analisys the videos i started to got chopped with es, instead of stop i continue to trying to recoup.
i need several hits to stop and wait the open.
really too much time on screen is not good.
i need time to practice, studying and reviewing

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

the incidence of the big losses is terrible, i try to reduce to 1 per week /4 per month in february
BL>16 es & >6 ZN, but really tghe killers were -132, -65 zn ,and ,-60-40-23 in ES
the second think is not allow to become in a loser, zn 12 in-9, an 50 in -6 in ES
Equity 100563.47 Max DD now is 2063 Win Days%55.6 net exp$12.36

Did you ever finish that Brett Steenbarger book? Maybe not? You seem to be far too impatient. Stick with 1 or 2 contracts until you are winning for at least a month - not load up as soon as one or two trades are got! and best not to jump around from market to market until you are really good at one of them.

And allow for the randomness of all this. Even a great trade can be a random event, so do not put too much emphasis on any trade. Consistency is king.

I hope this journal is helping you. Certainly helps to document your experience.
Wishing you well.

i continue trading cash, and the things looks good, i can trade similar to sim, i am very focus, and i journaling with a lot of details and scoring the trades according differents parameters, and give an evaluation, i am counting, if they re LL,LW,BL,BW (little or big loss orwin), and the main task is avoid the big loss,
yesterday i was temted to move the stop o the first 2 es trades but i accept the 8 tick loss, breathing and selfcontroling, (better because the y were long...)
i ma running a test combi, with similar parameters of combine 100k, to provide me a hard frame, it looks like the things are better in zn, tha es(i encounter it too electric, and crazy)
i am find fresh air when i realized that i can do it, but i know it is an illusion, because 1 big loss and boom!
also i am jornaling the differents setups to later i got the results, if the are difference beteween them, the same with the aiao, so, si.
i was thinking in my bearish position thta i started in s5 short1841, and it is very difficult to compete with that 1lot, daytrading, or the 200 ticks range from yesteraday
i close the 31jan, -1773, and that s all i need to get the 40points...
daytrading ,maybe2 lot shorts and 1 let all the time run, and the other out and in in all the way down....but online, i was short, then i say, now turn...not 4 push...and continue...and continue..
the losers yesterday were the counter trade, ...
how you can get and ride that down trend?
maybe that is not the question.
how can continue extracting 800 everyday?maybe it is

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself

i trade well in 2 trades, another up day
managing them, i continue short bias, and then a position-2 44, i hold with target 33,20, large mae 53 , i am thinking a way to catch the move down, this morning i see bouncing 37 ad grinding up, and i do not close or take profit, i say, it will go down, later with some smack down, but, what if this is the start to a bounce to 1900?, i am doing relatively well little bit to little bit, but i want more, then i take more risk, and the possibility to big loss appear, it look more probable to continue down, but it is not better to take the profit?, this morning i think, i so 1 lot, and then reenter, continue down, adn so on, but this is only possible if we go down.
it is very dificult to do the 2 things, swing and daytrade togueter, if i change my mind
the original pos is on, can i improve if i touch it?the real examples show me that not, in the other hand, building the account as i am doing, is compatible with this?

La lucha es de igual a igual contra uno mismo
The fight is fair against oneself