Write an Awesome Romantic Love Letter: The Simple “5R” Approach

Few activities offer the immediate and meaningful impact of writing a romantic love letter to your spouse.

It makes your spouse feel special, and it expresses your emotions in a format that creates a very personal keepsake. And for you couples working toward financial freedom, it’s totally free!

If you are like me, the idea of writing a romantic letter to a loved one brings back memories of my high school days.

I wrote a lot of late night love letters (as my Mom teasingly called them) during my teenage years, and I actually got pretty good at it. At least that’s what my girlfriend (and fortunately now my wife) tells me.

Sounds Great, So Where’s My Letter?

So, why don’t we write more romantic letters after we get married? We know they’ll be appreciated and score us major points. It doesn’t take long to do, it’s free and it’s a simple way to add some fun and romance to your marriage.

As I thought about why I don’t write to my wife as much as I should, I realized that the thought seems just overwhelming enough to continually put it off. And this is coming from a guy who routinely writes in-depth posts here at Engaged Marriage.

[Note: If you’re interested in crafting the perfect love letter and making it super easy, be sure to check out our announcement at the end of this post.]

I decided I needed to write a post about “How to Write a Romantic Letter.” After I jotted down some thoughts, I was stoked to discover that my simple approach to creating an awesome love letter fits into a series of five “R” tips. Here you go!

The Simple “5R” Approach to Romantic Letter Writing

1. Relax

When it comes to writing a love letter, there is no pressure and no need to be verbose or intellectual. A simple and heartfelt approach is the way to go. Think about those high school notes, and try to be that pure and straightforward with your writing style.

2. Reflect

Here’s some great news. The toughest part of writing a great letter is finding a few quiet minutes to sit and think about your spouse. And you know that will be a good time. Perhaps you can both do some individual thinking during your 15 minutes one evening.

It’s nice to have a simple theme to provide a framework for your letter. If it’s an occasion like a birthday, think of the fantastic memories you’ve shared over the past year. On an anniversary, compare your crazy first year of marriage to the current, even closer state of your relationship.

Of course, the best results are likely to come from a letter written “just because”, and I think this is a sweet opportunity to tell the story of your first date or engagement from your perspective (think emotions, expectations and excitement). Tell your spouse why you fell in love with them and why they’re even better today.

Affirm your spouse and you’ll create real joy.

3. Rough it Out

If you haven’t written much in a while, or even if you have, it’s really helpful to jot down your raw thoughts. When you are thinking through your theme (first date, her smile, his masculinity), just quickly write down the phrases that come to mind. This will allow yourcreativity to flow more than you’d expect, and it will help you get your thoughts straight.[quote]

All you have to do is arrange these phrases, throw in a few words to connect them, and you will have the workings of an awesome romantic letter.

4. Write…with Your Hand!

In today’s electronic world, it is tough to imagine writing a letter by hand. The thought actually makes my hand cramp a bit. But trust me, a handwritten romantic letter will be super impressive!

The medium you choose to write on is really not important aside from helping to set the mood you’re trying to create. It could be construction paper, a yellow pad or some fancy foil-embossed paper. Seriously, anything can work.

Now, if your handwriting is truly illegible, you may be forced to type out your thoughts (unless you can read your own writing and follow tip #5 as suggested). In that case, you should go for some nice paper and a cool font to add a personal touch.

5. Recite

Here’s where your romantic letter goes to the next level. Read it aloud to your spouse.

My wife and I wrote several letters to one another as part of a recent marriage retreat, and that was cool. However, the real magic came in the delivery when we read our thoughts to each other. You won’t believe how much better your feelings come through in this way.

If this just isn’t feasible in your situation, do something creative with the delivery to form a lasting memory. Mail the letter (I did this as precursor to the night I proposed to Bethany). Hide it someplace where it will be found at an unexpected time. Have it delivered to your spouse’s work along with a single rose or a cool picture of you together having fun.

It is time. Take the motivation you feel right now and start to jot down your thoughts. Follow through with a heartfelt romantic letter and deliver in an awesome way. Your spouse, and you, will be so glad that you did.

How would you like to have the perfect letter written FOR YOU?

If you love the idea of writing a love letter to your spouse, but you’d like some help, I have good news for you.

We recently released our new Romance the Write Way program, and it’s been very popular with both men and women. In a nutshell, it makes it really easy for you to craft the ideal message.

In fact, as a special bonus, we even give you proven fill-in-the-blank love letter templates that literally do the heavy lifting for you! If you can play Mad Libs, you can create a personalized letter that touches your spouse’s heart.

About the Author

Dustin Riechmann created Engaged Marriage to help other married couples live a life they love (especially) when they feel too busy to make it happen. He has many passions, including sharing ways to enjoy an awesome marriage in 15 minutes a day, but his heart belongs with his wife Bethany and their three young kids.