As a blue belt in Kuk Sool Won™, I nearly gave up. I had been training for a few months and wasn’t enjoying it as much as when I first started. I was gently encouraged to keep going for a little bit longer and I am glad that I did. By red belt I had turned a corner and never looked back. I have though, had to persevere through injuries, the stress of work and life commitments, all of which have, at times, made my training more challenging. Despite the challenges I have faced, I am now testing for second degree black belt and can’t imagine my life without martial arts. Perseverance is paying off for me.

Many students give up within the first few months of starting a martial art. They may get frustrated with themselves because they don’t feel that they are good enough or progressing as quickly as they would like. They may get injured and have difficulty accepting the need to adapt their training to allow for their injuries and physical limitations. Many students get busy and struggle to commit the time needed to train. They miss a few classes and instead of sticking with their training, they find it easier to give up. Other students get to black belt, a commitment requiring several years of training, only to quit within a few months, having reached their goal.

Martial arts training is difficult. Reaching black belt and beyond requires an on going commitment and determination to years of regular training. It is often easier to give up than to continue training. However, if we stick with it through all of the difficulties we will face, martial arts training provides a fantastic opportunity to learn about and develop perseverance and determination in the face of obstacles. This will help us not only with our martial art, but also the many difficulties and challenges life throws at us.

Next time you think about quitting your martial arts training, reflect on the many benefits you will gain if you persevere. Giving up might be easier, but persevering may well provide you with many more longer term benefits that extend well beyond your training.

During my childhood I played the piano. It was my passion and I put in thousands of hours of practice until I was about 20 years old. Needless to say I got pretty good at it. Even after a 20 year break from music, I could still play the piano well. The key was not only lots of time spent practising, but also making sure that the practice I did was of good quality.

Martial arts is no different to learning a musical instrument. To become good at it you need to practice a lot. As a general rule of thumb, you need to put in about 10,000 hours of practice to master a skill. For most of us who do martial arts recreationally, we will never achieve this level of practice. Even if we train for 5 hours a week for 50 weeks of the year, it will take 40 years to reach 10,000 hours.

While mastery may not be achievable for most of us, any practice will make us better. However, in my experience many people who train in martial arts either do not practice at all, other than during class time, or do not know how to practice well. It is not simply a case of repeating something over and over again, mindlessly. Practice must be deliberate, mindful, and structured to be effective. Here are some of the practice traps people fall into.

1. Unstructured practice: Most people practice without a plan. They just go through their material in sequence, practicing everything once or twice. While any practice is probably better than no practice at all, the benefits of this type of practice are limited. The time that most of us can devote to practising is relatively short, so we must plan for how we are going to use that time most effectively, to ensure everything is practised properly.2. Only practising what you are good at: It is common to focus on the things we are good at as this makes practising more enjoyable. However, we will improve more by practising those elements that are the hardest. This means we must break down our practice into components to ensure we devote practice time to the hard stuff, even though this might be difficult or less fun to do.3. Always starting at the beginning: Most people practice by starting at the beginning. For example, when practising forms in Kuk Sool Won™ (patterns in Taekwondo or kata in Karate), most people will practice the entire form from start to finish. This approach makes you good at the material at the beginning and the easier components of the form. A better approach is to break the form down into segments and practice those. This ensures you practice and get better at all elements, including the harder parts.4. Not being mindful: Many people just go through the motions when they are practising without thought or awareness. Practice must be deliberate and mindful to be effective. This means we need to really think about what we are doing. By being aware while we are practising, we can pick up and correct any mistakes we are making, refine our skills, and develop a deeper connection with and understanding of the material we are learning.

There is a saying that practice makes perfect. It doesn’t. Practice makes us better. It increases our physical skills, as well as our knowledge and understanding. Effective practice is not something that simply happens. We need to consciously develop good habits. This requires effort, thought and self-discipline. However, the rewards from disciplined practice are significant. You will get better, more quickly, and develop a deeper understanding of your martial art.

In my next blog I will focus on the third of the three P's; perseverance and martial arts.

As a white belt, I was often frustrated with all of the things I couldn’t do well. My balance was terrible, I couldn’t remember the moves, and I was constantly annoyed by the physical limitations of my 45 year old body. However, no one at my school expected me to have great kicks, or to remember everything easily, or to have great balance. In fact, they would have been surprised if I had. But I put huge pressure on myself and would easily become despondent. Martial arts brought me face to face with my nemesis, patience, and I didn’t like it.

As a black belt, instructor and school owner, I now find myself helping students with similar challenges with patience. Everyone’s challenge is different, but here are four of the common ones.1. Unrealistic expectations: Martial arts training is neither easy nor is not meant to be. In many ways, white belt is the hardest level of training in martial arts. You have never done it before so why would you be good at it? It would be like expecting to be good at playing the piano within a few weeks or months. We know it takes years of patient practice to become good at playing a musical instrument, so why would martial arts training be any different? Managing our expectations to ensure they are realistic is a key part of developing patience.2. Physical limitations: A fortunate few are blessed with athletic prowess. For most of us though, we have physical limitations which affect our ability as martial artists. I have two herniated discs in my neck and I am not very flexible. I am also middle-aged. All of these limit my martial arts training in some way. It is easy to become frustrated with physical limitations and either push your body too hard (risking injury) or give up. The patient option is to accept your physical limitations, minimise their impact, and work to your strengths. For example, I don’t do falling techniques as they hurt my neck. I also accept that I can’t kick very high, but I do gently work to improve my flexibility. By being patient with our bodies, we can gain many benefits from martial arts training without hurting ourselves or becoming despondent.3. Challenges with memory: Many people struggle with their memories. This can be particularly challenging in a martial art like ours (Kuk Sool Won™), where there is a lot of material to learn and remember. It can feel very daunting in the early stages of learning a martial art, particularly as you are also trying to remember new ways of moving and using your body. Developing your memory is like any other skill. You need to work at it. At first, your memory won’t be great, but over time it will improve. If you get stressed and frustrated though, it will make your memory worse. By being patient with your memory, you will enjoy the process of learning a great deal more and by being more relaxed, your memory is likely to improve. Even if it doesn’t, you will still benefit from your training.4. Competitive nature: I am a competitive person by nature. I want to be good at what I do and I am always looking to push myself to be better. It is common for our students to be competitive with themselves. This provides a high degree of motivation to train and to improve, which can be a good thing. However, it can also lead to frustration and injury. As well, it is easy to miss the joy of training and learning. Patience involves being in the moment and enjoying the process of training for its own sake, rather than as a process to enable the achievement of a goal.

Patience is something that must be practiced and developed. It comes naturally to very few of us. By becoming more patient, we learn to accept our limitations and show ourselves more kindness. This is an important part of martial arts training, which will have flow on benefits to many other aspects of your life.

In my next blog I will talk about the second of the three Ps, practice, and how this is relevant to martial arts training.

Martial arts teaches us many things. A lot of what we learn are physical skills, such as kicking and striking, self-defence techniques, and how to use martial arts weapons. Less tangible are the character building skills that come with martial arts training. In this category are what are often referred to as the three Ps: patience, practice and perseverance. At various times during our martial arts careers we will all struggle with one or more of the these. I certainly have and continue to do so.

Patience is often an issue for new students (and particularly adults) who can become easily frustrated by how long it is taking them to get to grips with the new skills they are learning. Practice is an on-going challenge for most of us. Our busy lives mean that we can struggle to find the time and motivation to train outside of structured class times. It is also a particular issue for children, who have a tendency to leave what they have learnt at the door at the end of their class. Training also requires a high degree of determination and perseverance. It is hard to continue training over the many years required to reach black belt (and beyond) and in our experience, a lot of people drop out of martial arts within the first year.

Over the next three blogs I will discuss my views on patience, practice and perseverance within a martial arts context and the challenges each of these bring. If they can be overcome, they provide fantastic opportunities to learn and develop both as a martial artist and as a person.

Most people probably consider that some level of black belt is the hardest rank to achieve in martial arts. While first degree black belt and beyond are difficult to gain, in my opinion they are not the hardest ranks. For most people, the hardest is white belt. It takes many of us years and even decades, as well as a great deal of motivation and courage, to make the commitment to start martial arts training and gain our white belt. For me, it took nearly 45 years. For some it takes even longer. For one woman in our school for example, it took her 72 years!

So why did it take me so long to earn my white belt? I had been interested in martial arts for many years. I tried two different styles before finally committing to Kuk Sool Won™. In my early 20s I tried a popular style of martial arts. I recall finding a place amongst the large number of students and doing my best to copy. No one from the school talked to me or helped me and I didn’t have any one-on-one instruction. It was a rather intimidating and demoralising experience. After two classes I decided not to join the club. In my early 30s I tried a different martial art. It was a small club but I had a similar experience. These experiences really put me off martial arts.

It was not until I was in my forties that I stumbled across a martial arts school that was very welcoming towards new students and where I felt comfortable and safe as a beginner. It took me over four decades of life experience to finally earn my white belt. By comparison, the four years or so it takes to get to black belt is relatively quick and easy.

With so many martial arts schools out there, it can be daunting trying to find a good one that will suit you or your children. If you get it right, you can look forward to years of great training experiences ahead of you. If you get it wrong, it will not only cost you money, but it may also put you off martial arts for life. Here are our top ten tips to finding a good school.1. What type of training are you looking for? Different styles of martial arts focus on different types of training, so it is a good idea to think about your training goals and aspirations. For example, are you looking for a hard physical workout which emphasizes competitive fighting or sparring or are you more focused on learning self-defence and the personal journey of developing your body and mind? Do some internet research on the types of martial arts offered in your area to narrow down your options.2. Do they get back to you? A good school owner will get back to your initial inquiry quickly. If they don’t, then they probably don’t have the best communication and people skills.3. Do they make you feel welcome? A good martial arts school should be a welcoming and friendly place. Does the instructor introduce him or herself when you walk in the door, Are you made to feel welcome, and are the students friendly?4. Are they upfront about all of the costs? Many martial arts schools will sell you on a low monthly fee, only to hit you later with extra costs for gradings, belts and uniforms. These can be very expensive. A good school will be upfront about all of the costs of training so you can make an informed decision.5. Do you get to try before you buy? It is important to try some classes before you make a commitment, to ensure it is the right martial art for you or your kids. At our schools (Kuk Sool Won™ of Pukekohe and Onewhero), we offer two free classes, with the first involving a one-on-one session with an instructor to learn the basics. This gives you a good opportunity to see if you like the martial art, the instructors, and the school environment.6. Is it a respectful environment? A good martial art is built on a platform of respect, irrespective of rank or position in the school. Importantly, a good instructor will treat all students respectfully. There is no place for bullying behavior in a good martial arts school.7. Is it a safe place? The school and its activities must be safe. Are there well maintained and clean mats? Is the training hall clean? If the students are sparring, are they required to wear safety gear? Are the activities well supervised and controlled by the instructor to ensure no one is getting hurt or becoming aggressive?8. Is the school part of a regulated international association? Anyone can set up a martial arts school with little training or regulation. When a school is part of a recognized and regulated international association, you have a degree of assurance that the instructor is properly trained and teaching quality is controlled. For example, all Kuk Sool Won™ schools are licensed by the World Kuk Sool Association, which is governed by one Grandmaster. All schools are required to teach to a set curriculum and the Grandmaster oversees black belt testings around the world. This maintains quality and oversight of schools and instructor teaching standards.9. Have you checked out other schools? We recommend that you check out more than one school before you make a commitment, so that you can make an informed decision on the school that is best for you.10. What is your gut telling you? Your gut instinct is fundamentally the most important factor in finding a good school. If it doesn’t feel right, you don’t feel welcome, or it doesn’t feel safe, trust that gut instinct and go somewhere else. If though, it feels like a safe, welcoming place, with friendly people who are happy to answer all of your questions, then it is probably the right place for you.