Day 5

Well today could have went a lot better. Ironically, today's dare is also on our anniversary. The other irony is I completed the dare and didn't say a word. I've spent weeks planning for today. Planned dinner out, childcare, etc.. because it's been quite a long time since my wife and I have been out and enjoyed each other. Needless to say, it didn't play out that way.

I called my college instructor and got the night off and went home early from work and cleaned the house and other odds and ends that she's been needing done. Well the kids come in the door and they said mom is taking our other son to get a haircut. She didn't even come inside. I called her just to try to explain what I had planned because I knew I had a very small window of time. She blew me off stating that it was just another day. When she got home, I tried to speak to her. Again, not angry. I was definitely hurt but I kept reciting Colossians 3 and praying for patience, humbleness and words.

After she was done speaking, I asked if she would be willing to at least do Bible study and prayer with me. She rejected. Which is probably the hardest thing. I've only recently began actively reading my Bible and studying in prayer and I've never invited her to do so with me. So, it's definitely something that she is not used to from me. I began to have an overwhelming shame. She has always been the prayer warrior in our family and willing to share Christ with anyone. Now she rejected to share study time with me. I'm worried and ashamed that my pride and selfishness have been such a burden on her that I've lead her faith astray.

I just keep praying for patience, forgiveness, kindness and humility to be shown toward her and that God places His hand on her heart and helps us fight our demons together.

Be careful of trying to do more than a dare for the day. any more often is us getting in the space they need or us trying to push them to where we want them to be. Was today's dare about asking what 3 things.....? or do I have the dares wrong? I am not sure how you did the dare without saying anything.

She has to say no to all of these things right now, to justify her behavior. She can not give in in her mind.