Saturday, December 19, 2015

A Sense of God's Timing

O
God, grant us a sense of your timing. In this season of short days and long
nights, of grey and white and cold, teach us the lessons of beginnings; that
such waitings and endings may be the starting place, a planting of seeds which
bring to birth what is ready to be born something right and just and different,
a new song, a deeper relationship, a fuller love in the fullness of your time.

-from Ted Loder,Guerillas of Grace

Grant us a sense of your timing…

Yes. Please.

Because my timing is almost always not God’s timing. My
timing right now would add about 3 hours to each day and 3 weeks to Advent so I
could get everything done I think I need to get done before Christmas Eve. My
to-do list includes shopping for family and friends, attending concerts and
holiday events, cleaning the ever-messy home to host gatherings, organizing
said gatherings, and preparing exquisite Christmas meals, among the dozens of
items.

And that doesn’t even include the church to-do list for
worship, including a Christmas pageant on Christmas Eve that will be both
adorable and theologically engaging while requiring little to no rehearsals.

Oh, and wait. It’s Advent, so I try to pray Evening Prayer
each night, sitting quietly and reflectively by my Advent wreath as I remember to
slow down, reflect, and be present to the season.

I think I failed Advent.

Because it’s now almost Christmas, and few things are done
and many are left undone. I feel anxious, a bit hurried, and a lot tired.

The sense of God’s timing is not one which waits for us to
be perfectly prepared, well organized, and ready. God’s timing reminds us we
will never be ready to receive the amazing gift of Love. God’s timing simply
asks us to hold out our hands and hearts and receive the Love that is being
born into our lives, whenever those moments arrive.

I light a candle on my Advent wreath, then remember to light
the other two. I breathe and marvel at the love of God who welcomes me,
anxiety, hurriedness, and all. For the first time in days, I release a deep
breath which carries with it the things I think I need to get done.

I remember God is with us, in marvelous and quiet ways. God
with us in our hurriedness. God is with us in our quietness. God is with us,
and all I have to do, really, is to open my heart and receive.

For that, I give thanks.

But I’m still looking for that Christmas Pageant.

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1 comment:

Thanks for this. I woke up this morning overwhelmed with the week to come, and knowing my husband is feeling it even more. "failing Advent" seems to be a regular thing here at the Rectory. My prayer for all in God's service today is that this week will be one of joyful anticipation, and that the long list of things to do will not get in the way of truly celebrating and being present in the moment. Christ must shake His head at how we celebrate His birthday!