Wednesday, 27 May 2009

It all began one day when I started getting a severe headache in spite of using my spectacles the whole day at work. In addition, the constant staring at the computer monitor was not helping much. Eventually I stopped wearing them for a couple of days and then concluded that either my visibility has increased or decreased. This conclusion needed to be checked out by having an eye test.

Walking in town during my lunch break, my eyes fell upon a sign that said 'Free Eye Tests'. Nothing like 'Free' right? I rushed to the shop and booked an appointment. An ‘Optical Wear’ shop provided free eye tests. The catch was 'You had to buy your spectacles from them as they did not give you your test results'. I fell hook, line and sinker since I came to know of this only after I had completed the eye test.

The 'Eye Test’ itself was routine. In India, I had my eye doctor who funnily enough went by the name 'Andhare' which means 'darkness' in Marathi. I used to look forward to the eye tests, as he was quite jovial and used to wear fantastic colognes/perfumes. It was definitely worth it after sitting for 30 minutes with an itchy and burning solution in your eyes, which helped dilate your pupils.

I was reminiscing about the eye tests in India when I met up with the doctor here. The same routine of reading the lit up board with alphabets whose size goes on decreasing from top to bottom. The same itchy solution and at that point I sorely missed the joviality and cologne of Dr. Andhare.

After boring my eyes with piercing light and pressing my eyeballs the doctor declared that, my eyes are healthy and there is nothing to worry about only for a slight change in the power of my glasses.

Now I had two options. To forget this eye test ever happened or make a new pair of glasses. I chose the second option and lo behold! I made my first mistake. I was so excited by the prospect of changing my look with new glasses that, I enthusiastically was hooked into the trap of the shops selling strategy. They had a scheme- three designer glasses for the cost of one. I thought Wow! What a deal! I exuberantly tried glasses on to chose the three pairs. Caught up in the moment I threw caution to the wind.

After I had chosen the three pairs, I asked for the bill and my eyes popped out after I saw figure. Too embarrassed to walk out and excited at the prospect of wearing 'J K London', I caved in and bought them all.

The impulsive purchase for glasses gave me sleepless nights 2 days in a row. I eventually accepted my decision and am using them now. Family and friends complementing on my look has finally put my mind at peace.

Has it ever happened to you? You bought something and then cursed yourself for buying it. You dreamed of all the money you spent on an impulsive purchase that can be used for paying bills or buying something useful. Do share with me your embarrassing shopping sprees and what you wish you should not have ever bought.

Wednesday, 20 May 2009

In spite of the title sounding so ominous most of you must have guessed. I am talking about marriage and that too specifically arranged marriages. Recently, a few of my friends have decided to venture on this well trodden path and the experiences that they shared with me prompted me into putting this post.

Even though the trend is more towards love marriages now a days, there are many who go by the age old routine of getting hooked the traditional way. Parents of the prospective brides and grooms have become quite lenient with the 'Ladki/Ladka dekhna routine'. Gone are the days when, if the grooms family come to meet the family of prospective bride, the bride is not inspected as a piece of furniture or like a cattle whose qualities and virtues have to be spelled out in bold.

Now, the girl and the boy are both given an opportunity to chat, go out and talk to each other at length to find out if their attitudes match and whether they like each other or not. Since the advent of Internet, Matrimonial sites are doing brisk business. The task of matchmaking which was earlier performed by relatives and friends has been replaced. Its refreshing to parents changing their stance and gradually changing with the times.A new trend is also becoming very common, love-cum arranged marriages. Here the boy and the girl decide to get married and the families are also giving their support whole hearted. This seems like a win-win situation.

Personally, I am all for this love-cum arranged marriages. I have never been a fan of arranged marriage in spite of my parents having been married that way.It is such a tough task to choose your life partner in just two or three meetings. That too when both are at their best behaviour and trying hard to impress each other. You have to make adjustments in every marriage be it love or arranged but in a love marriage you are ready for compromises.

I know that everyone cannot have a love marriage and they choose to have their parents find the right match. It must be a tough task to choose someone without knowing him/her well and to decide to spend your entire life with them. Thankfully I never had to go through that experience. How do you decide?? What criteria to look for? Which people to avoid?? Are you taking the right decision?? Is that the right family for me?? the list is endless.

The age old question remains When do you know you have found the right person as your life partner??

I have a sincere admiration for the people who have the courage to embark on such a difficult journey. And for people who want to have a glimpse of what I am saying, please go and see the movie 'Just Married'.

Tommorow is 'Mothers Day' and I wanted to dedicate this post to my mother and many other wonderful mothers I know.

My mother is a wonderful person. She is a chatter box and from her I got the quality of being a talkative person. She cooks amazing food and is a very good singer. She is a great mom and quite emotional even though she vehemently denies that accusation.

I know that if she would have got a chance to follow her dreams, she would have been a very successful singer or a Master Chef. The choices were made for her and she like dutiful daughter and wife played by the rules. Even though she is emotional and soft when it comes to her daughters, at the core she is a strong person who has been with my father every step of the way for over 40 years.

She has an immense reservoir of patience. I do wonder sometimes that did my mother get exasperated when I learnt to walk and eat? When I spilled something on my clothes or when I must have puked on her clothes. The endless hours of going without sleep and feeding, diaper changing and pacifying my cries. I am sure it must be difficult and she must have definitely wanted to scream with exasperation.

I remember that she was always there for me and is still there when I need a word of advice or just to cry because I am exhausted and confused with the ups and downs of life. Even now after having my own family and being far away from her I still turn towards her for support and eternal wisdom.

This 'Mothers Day', I would like to thank her for all the sleepless nights she spent worried about me. Her loving and wise words. Her patience and love. Her selfless devotion. Her encouraging and supportive nature and for never getting angry at me even when I was behaving like a Incorrigible child.

Thank You 'Aai ' .

The following poem says it all even things I was unable to express:

Without You

Mom, without you, there would be no me.Your love, your attention, your guidance,have made me who I am.Without you, I would be lost,wandering aimlessly,without direction or purpose.You showed me the wayto serve, to accomplish, to persevere.Without you, there would be an empty spaceI could never fill, no matter how I tried.Instead, because of you,I have joy, contentment, satisfaction and peace.Thank you, mom.I have always loved youand I always will.