How were you recruited? Tell us all the details.
I was met with the MK opportunity at a vulnerable time in my life as a newly wed who’s husband was gone in the NAVY. A good friend’s mom who I trusted called me and presented the opportunity to me. I was so excited knowing that this was the change in my life I had been praying for. I signed up after talking to my husband, and then got the inventory call.
I’m also a college student, so I was reluctant to even pay the starter kit, website, propay money, but I did to prove I was a serious consultant who really wanted to work my business. My director set the bar at $1200 for me, and I had a hard time accepting the manipulating things she was saying, because I kept thinking of all the red flags when she was telling me to use a credit card. I don’t believe in credit cards, plus I’m already in school debt, so it wasn’t an option. She made me feel guilty by telling me her sob story of when she starting MK as a bankrupt preggers who wrote a bad check to pay for her starter kit, so she wouldn’t accept excuses from me.

She pulled the God card saying I was living in fear and God didn’t call me to be fearful, blah blah blah blah blah! I gave in and borrowed the money from my mom, and luckily was able to pay it back with tax returns! Oh, and I didn’t a $1800 instead of a $1200…

I started going to adoptee meetings excited about my new “career,” but I felt uneasy, because I truly didn’t like the Mary Kay enthusiasm or all the consultants/red jackets young and old who hadn’t a CLUE HOW TO WEAR MAKEUP pretending they were makeup artists. I ignored that, though. I got caught up in the hype, and became close to my director.
Because I’m my director’s daughter’s friend, she got emotionally attached to me saying I was like her daughter, and so on, and I trusted her, because she has made so many great “milestones” w/ the company and has been in for 20 yrs. She started using our bonding experiences to manipulate me when I wasn’t doing everything she asked. I wasn’t allowed to make any orders without her, and I felt like I was micro-managed even though I opened my own business!

Do you have a memorable experience from your time in Mary Kay? If so, please tell us about it.
I went to leadership and seminar, and got swept up in the hype. My director showed me off to everyone (even though I wasn’t a star) saying how I was going to be the next big thing. Because of my age, personality, and because I wasn’t ugly everyone thought I was going to do huge things when I got home. I didn’t want to let them or myself down, so I got to work. I put on my MK uniform before and after work and hit salons trying to do baskets with them. I made phone calls. I became overwhelmed instantly in the first week! I became a workaholic, and I hadn’t even started! I felt completely wimpy, because I barely even did anything, and I was already out of energy!

A few months later I started expressing dislike in what I was doing to my director. She called me pigheaded and childish. She said the conversation was really pissing her off, and that I was jerking her around, because one minute I wanted to become a director and the next minute I just wanted to do part-time. She was very hard on me, because of our close relationship, which probably made it worse for me. I got off the phone crying and really upset in myself about being a failure or as she said “a quitter, because I didn’t even try.”

At this point, I knew nothing would change. I hated pretending that I liked what I was doing. I was so bogged down by the lifestyle, and I couldn’t get back up. I spent more money than I should’ve on gas to get to my adoptee meeting (an hour away!), printer ink, business clothes, business products, baskets & basket products for giveaways, conference costs, inventory, etc. etc.
I started finding things out about my director’s personal life like her marriage falling apart, her manipulative tactics with her daughter/family members, etc. and started to feel a little more empowered. No longer did I take all the blame for everything! I started to fish around these sites, and I knew I had to get out! Why did I feel like I was in a cult??!

I had a business phone call w/ my director to tell her I simply couldn’t do this anymore, because I didn’t have the time and money to continue part-time. As soon as the words were spoken, she freaked out! She felt personally attacked by me even though all I’d mentioned were myself and MY BUSINESS not her! She practically said I was bi-polar, started yelling at me, didn’t let me get a word in to explain anything, she even swore, and started doing this stupid role-playing. She said if I had a son who started whining because he couldn’t make the team, what would I tell him? I said, “I don’t know, I don’t have kids. Try again next year?” I knew what she was getting at, and I was so pissed off at this point.

She said she has consultants do part-time that work two jobs and have children. My question was DO THEY MAKE ANY MONEY? That’s all I’m concerned with right now. Then, she started the angle that I wasn’t teachable and I refused to learn anything in life. I’d be stuck in my present circumstances for the rest of my life and pass it onto my children. There’s really nothing so bad about my life, but whatever.
Again, I left the conversation crying. She later put up a FB post related to me. Real mature. I sent her a lengthy Email afterwards. I just really can’t believe I ignored all the warning signs. I trusted this family friend and she turned out to be a manipulative lunatic. I know she’ll be gossiping about me to all those people who had high hopes for me at seminar, but what can I do? I feel so used! Ugh!
This happened two nights ago, by the way…

What are you doing now?
Trying to get out. Trying to vent on this site, because no one except someone who’s been in MK can understand the craziness.
Feel free to include any additional comments here:Ten Things I hate about Mary Kay:
1. Panty hose and business skirts…really? This is 2011. I spent way too much on my consultant clothes when I had so many nice business pants
2. How they use God to manipulate you into doing something, but won’t allow you to say, “God is leading me in another direction.”
3. I HATE the horribly unfashionable director’s uniform. Apart from the black one from 2010 (I think), they’re all so ugly and unflattering.
4. Most Mary Kay ladies can’t do their own makeup let alone others! For weddings, I was told to give the makeup samples to the bridesmaids and let them do their own. Why are they paying me, then? I never felt comfortable with that, so I ALWAYS did what they paid me to do at weddings.
5. Being a STAR consultant…I never understood why that was the “highest honor in MK.” I still don’t.
6. Any objection you have to anything is overcome and used against in other conversations.
7. Although I like the product, MK makeup (more so the colors) are not like pro brands like MAC. I hate that everyone in MK thinks they are when you can barely can do a clean smokey eye with the black.
8. EVERYONE IS A CLONE! This bothered me the most as a young person. I hate that I couldn’t have an identity apart from everyone else. To me, makeup is an art, but this business is all sales and NO art, therefore everyone looks cheap unless you’re gorgeous enough to pull of a cheap look. Some definitely can.
9. The directors all act like they’re living large. Unless they have a rich husband, I KNOW most of them are either in debt or just scraping by with their sales. Almost EVERYTHING goes into their business.
10. Because I was more “family oriented” and a “people pleaser” my personality was definitely working against me in this business. My director was extremely dominant making her the best candidate in the world, and I (not even joking) had to be like her to be successful. I never want to feel like my personality or my strengths are a weakness. Good Lord!

Comments

So sorry this happened to you Puking Pink. May I ask what state you live in? Fortunately I’ve been lucky enough to have a director that doesn’t put any pressure on me. I’ve only worked MK part time for extra money. I never get hassled for it. Good luck!!!

The reason MK directors pressure some consultants and not others is, in my observation, purely financial. If they know you will or can get money for inventory, they will be on you constantly. If not, they will let you continue on your merry part-time, donesn’t-sell-a-bunch way.

It’s deplorable what you’ve been through. I’m so sorry for you! I am with you on this trip as well! Thanks for sharing your story, because it’s learning this (better late than never) that will help so many other people. I wish I had found this site before starting MK.

I’ve been buying Mary Kay off and on for about 15 years. With the same consultant. She was a director, had a car, had a great thing going. She was really sick for 4 years, and Mary Kay sales still kept happening; just with repeat orders. She has asked me several times over the years about being a consultant. I’ve never felt pressured by her. I love that. It is the people who make a difference.
Unfortunately, not every consultant/director is going to be awesome. If she wasn’t my consultant, I wouldn’t even be considering it.

I am so sorry this happened to you.. My director has been around for 20 years and is in and out of cadillac and in the next car but she NEVER pressures people. As a matter of fact 1/3 of her unit has been with her 10 years or MORE. Its better to have a strong foundation than a house of cards. I hope you find someone who treats you like a human if you stay in.

Sorry to hear about your experience with Mary Kay. It’s unfortunate that there are directors who have that attitude. Luckily for me, both my Director and Adoptee Director never pressured me into doing anything I didn’t want. I have had my business since August. I didnt get inventory because I didnt to want to because of the same reason as you, I was already in debt and didnt want to use my credit card which my Director understood and never pressured.
I revolve everything around my family and have another full time job and don’t get to do my Mk business on a daily basis as I would like. With all that said, a little FYI, Did you know that you can become inactive and then become active again under a differently unit?

Hi, i feel eactly the way you do. I just started with this business. ANd i feel like ive made the wrong choise. I invested 1800 well like almost 2000 with taxes. I have NEVER asked my husband for a large quantity of money. I was excited the first weeks, but right after i bought my inventory it seems like my “director” doesnt put any attention. Unless it’s to have new consulatnts. They actually gave me a call right now and they invited me for a meeting with the lady that recruited me. And she said i can HAVE breakfast on monday with my director if i have 3 new consultants by monday, its saturday!!!! WHAT?! i said NO i dont think i will. but they told me they call ME cause they know that I Can. I feel like ive been manipulated into something that benifits them. I feel very guilty i owe my husband 2,000 and THATS the only reason why i don’t wanna stop. Thing is i did it at heat of the moment. Everyone hugged me and congurtaled me when i jioned and they told me i was beautiful and GOD put me on the right path. And my director is looking for new young beautiful girls. I was fooled. I bought 1800. i mean i can try to sell and work my butt off but my husband is a business owener we make lot of money, take a lot of vacations. I just did it because i wanted to feel like i can do it on my own. I CAN, but not when people are pushing me and do this and do that. and they use GOD to tell you he put me on this direction. and why in the world do i have to go tell other girls the same thing?! I am beautiful, this i know and i don’t need MARY KAY to make me feel this way. i HOPE i have the guts to return the inventory and call this a quit. BEst of luck for me//…

Hi, I am so sorry to hear about your experience with MK. I’m not a consultant but work for a chamber of commerce so I see a lot of independent distributors. My MK consultant is great, loves the product, and really she does her “own thing” and stays true to herself. I don’t know what she tells her unit or director, but she really does run her own business and everyone loves her! I met her when she first started 2 years ago and it took a while but she continues to grow her business and has begun a downline. If you really want to sell the products and help women look their best and build confidence, make your business your own. See if you can get a new director, because there are some great ones out there!

I’ve been with Mary Kay for four months now. I have started slow, even after buying my inventory, because of some personal emotional trauma. My Team Leader, Director and my National have been nothing but supportive and encouraging. Coming out of a very difficult job and ending a long career, this has been an absolute God-send. They encourage and support me every step of the way, as does every other member of the two teams I am associated with (Director and National) As with any group of hundreds of thousands of people, as with Mary Kay, some are going to be less effective….perhaps even less capable is a better term…than others. And I have to agree that not everyone I meet or saw at conference could claim to be a makeup artist. On the other hand, if they customers to whom they are selling are happy with their advice then who am I to say they don’t know what they are doing? The first and most important instructions I was given were to be sincere and to always be a blessing to other women whether I sold a single product or not. If any of you have had a bad experience with a Team Leader, a Director or even a National Sales Director, I encourage you to contact Corporate and share your concerns. I am beginning to make a little money and I am learning every day how to meet more women and attend more events with the primary goal of blessing someone. Our National and my Director both teach that if we keep that as our primary goal, the sales will take care of themselves. I have to say so far, that has proven to be exactly right. I helped a woman achieve a look that she never thought she could some weeks ago. If she had not bought a single thing, I would have been just as blessed with the result. As it was, she did buy and I am working with her to pay some each week until she pays for the entire order (I would only do this with someone I know well!) If Mary Kay did not work for you, that’s ok. But please don’t treat your experience as an opportunity to denigrate thousands of women who choose to believe they can achieve, and they do exactly that. If you are not comfortable with sales, then just don’t do it. If you get an unsatisfactory Director, call Corporate. But please don’t badmouth the whole company because you had a personally unhappy experience.

Donna, I appreciate your comments, but since you’ve only been with MK for four months, you’re less than objective and still affected greatly by the brain washing and the emotion of it all.

You say that you had a great experience helping a woman achieve a look she never thought she could and those sorts of things are emotionally rewarding indeed, but the name of the game is sales, and sales is about making money. Mary Kay Corp. has NO problem whatsoever making money. This isn’t a mission, although many women think it is and Mary Kay Ash and the company are happy to have that impression stick, hence all the God talk. Lots of recruiting is done via church and many think they are somehow drawn to MK because of some God who wants them to do it.

No one is badmouthing a company, and if you took the time to read the content here, you would realize we are trying to get women, and the men, to open their eyes.

Wow! Most directors ar not so obvious. It is awful that so many trap women who are at their most vulnerable. My husband had just died and I was trying to start over with my life without him. I was already struggling with the debts he left behind. Thank God (the real one not the one MK “worships”) I did not get in too deep. My eyes were opened by websites like this one before that happened.
Glad you are well out of that abusive situation Puking Pink. For others beware of the “nice” ones (directrors) they can be even worse than the obviously manipulative ones.

Sorry to hear of your bad experience. I have a wonderful director who listened to my concerns about inventory. We held my debut and used the sales to put towards the first part of my store. I cannot and will not use a credit card for any inventory. We are starting my business off right. I love the support I get from my Director (who has been in MK for over 26 years and has earned numerous cars), my recruiter and the other lovely ladies in my unit. I get inspired by the women that I see who overcome personal roadblocks and life situations to thrive in this company. MK is not an open the box and boom you are rich miracle. You have to work it and yes, work hard sometimes. You can’t go to a job and be expected to earn your paycheck for sitting in a chair and watching the clock – you have to do your job and running your own business is no different. I wish that you would go out and research a Director and a unit that fits you and your personality – I know once you do you will thrive 🙂

I’m sorry for all of the trouble you’ve been put through. I really do hope you can get out and do what makes you happy. I also feel it is just your director and the people around you. Ladies in my area can wear what we want and our directors have let us make every decision and been completely supportive with whatever we want to do. If I didn’t have the director I have now, I wouldn’t have gotten into MK. It’s been nothing but a positive experience and I have actually been making money, and no one recruited me or pressured me into anything. I think you just got stuck with the wrong people. Best of luck!

Hey! I am having the same issues and I even asked why we had to wear the stupid black panty hose and black skirt and white shirt. I never understood it when Mary Kay herself doesn’t wear any of that crap. I was frustrated and I still am frustrated. I am so glad I didn’t allow them to talk to me like that. I am still in it because my stuff is half off until May. I didn’t like the way Mary Kay Ash looked. To me personally she looks like a drag queen…

I’m sorry to hear what you’ve been through. It sounds like you were put under a lot of unnecessary pressure and had terrible leadership.

I love having my own business. I do it at my own pace. My uplines never pressure me, either. I also study makeup artistry, so I can completely understand what you mean when you mentioned the MK Independent Beauty Consultants “who hadn’t a CLUE HOW TO WEAR MAKEUP pretending they were makeup artists.” I completely agree with you about that. I decided that if I’m going to learn this business, I”m going to learn the basics of good skin care and the basics of how to properly wear makeup. By my knowledge alone, I have kept a small, steady clientel base. When your clients respect you, which mine respect that I’m knowledgeable and not a pressure saleswomen, they are more likely to buy from you.

I’d love to speak with you one on one sometime when you have free time and hear your story. I’m not a director or anything like that, but I have made Star Consultant in my first quarter and I can tell you what I’ve experienced.

Nicole Martin ,Mary Kay is deceased, and she wanted her representatives to look business like. Some directors give out really cheap crud. I joined on my own. but my director wasn’t friendly to me, she said you will be in this persons group because she just made director. How nice was that. I got kicked to the curb by my own director. My next director was a religious fanatic, and I had to remind her I was not of her religion. She pushed us all to sell sell sell. She said we are doing women a favor. lol I really liked Mary Kay, the women, but her directors were not like her.

I hope your doing better now. I am blessed to have a director that cares and have met woman that care in my unit and in others. I know they can give you some what of an nudge but I know that is to help you see, you can if you try. I have had to leave Mary Kay and restart because of personal matters but I have had only support from my director and unit. I thank God for my Mary Kay business because it has help me stay focused on positive things when I needed the support. Hoping you the best.

What a horrible experience. Were you able to get out?
I was duped by someone I thought cared about me as well. She lied to me countless times. And she stole sales from me. I am trying so hard to let it go, and forgive her but it’s very hard. I am very happy to be out of the cult, but am disgusted that I lost $2500.
I am so grateful to have found pink lighthouse. I am looking for a loophole in this company. My goal is to find a way to stop them from using innocent people, who can’t afford this product.

Let me tell you, my neighbor is a Mary Kay director and she is also a hoarder. I have a complaint with the board of health for her to clean up her mess. She’s like a tick, she sees someone new in my driveway and rushes right out to meet them and asks if she can do her makeup and would they like to have a party. She’s a parasite. She and her husband (no kids, ever) have plenty of money but they live like slobs. I wish I could post the pictures here. She collects trash and then fondles it like it’s solid gold. Yikes! She’s very strange.

A lot of what you wrote resonated with me and brought back memories — I started using MK in, I think, 1980 and became a consultant – primarily because I wanted my product at cost — but also, I was young and they were sooo good at convincing you that you could make a career, a real career, out of Mary Kay. And you CAN, obviously — but I didn’t feel like I really had the interest or, let’s face it, gumption to become one of ‘them’. Don’t get me wrong, the people I worked with were perfectly nice and professional, and we may have parted ways less than cleanly (I’m sure my director pressured me the same as you, sans the yelling and personal attacks) – but the thing is – I KNEW I wasn’t like their ‘mold’. Hell, I was a rock n’ roll gal – into going to Sabbath concerts and a tad of semi-wild partying – that didn’t mean I couldn’t look good doing it! And I did — and I still do — I still use Mary Kay and I definitely get shocked looks to this day when I tell people my age – because it DOES work if you use it (particularly your basic cleansing routines).
I never bought or wore (or would’ve worn) a ‘uniform’ or special jacket – I didn’t have the money to invest in anything except stock and gas. I have a few amazingly funny stories about the various vehicles I had to use during this time. Holy crap, I could write a book.
But I have to agree that the ‘gung-ho, Super-Christian, Rah Rah’ mentality really turned me off. It was cool in the beginning but at some point I was like “ok, seriously, chill out – I’m feeling like I’m in the Moonies church or something” – its very cult-like. But that’s the idea — they SELL you, and they teach you to SELL to others. That’s what SELLING is — its a form of subtle (or not so subtle) brainwashing – every time you go out there. Being a MK consultant made me hate selling. Marketing. I still have a resentment to it and fight being ‘marketed’ to in any aspect of my life, which is not a plus in my current career… lol.
Anyway, the way I ended up here is I googled to see if anyone else hated the new Mary Kay line of products… I’m really disappointed in them (Time-Wise etc) and my face is so dry.. and I noticed lines and creases within a couple weeks of using them — and I supposedly can’t get the old regular Basics anymore – I may actually have to find new products from a new company now after 30+ years!
Anyway, I digress…