Levi Johnson Definitely Doesn’t Shoot Blanks

The UK’s dailymail.uk.co is predictably appalled by Levi Johnson’s plan to name his latest illegitimate offspring Breeze Beretta when she’s born. Of all things…a gun. You remember Levi. He’s the hockey player who impregnated Sarah Palin’s daughter, then turned around and allowed himself to be used by various media outlets to attack the Palin family. Now he’s managed to knock up another chick to whom he isn’t married, Sunny somebody. Turns out he’s an avid hunter. The two of them went on a four-day expedition and forgot to pack birth control. Oops. No word as to whether he managed to bag anything – other than Sunny – on the trip. Someday the kid will count herself darned lucky that dear old dad wasn’t an Anschutz fan.

I’ll bet the folks in Alaska are just overjoyed that ol’ Levi has made another single mother that will probably need food stamps and welfare checks to raise his kid. I was very carefull to NOT make a herd of babies when I was out and single. And that was decades ago! Why can’t this guy practice safe sex. As to what he names his kid, I don’t care as long as I don’t have to contribute to feeding it, schooling it, sheltering it, or clothing it.

If the American taxpayer is not going to pay for my health insurance then I do not want my money stolen by government to support single parent welfare. When a society rewards bad or irresponsible behavior then it will get more of it.

While no criteria is thus far known to have been formally established for Mousering Glocking, Barretting or Mossberging, the commonly held notion is such that only two successful hunts are necessary to qualify as a Bushmaster.

As an impertinent aside, rumor has it that the Queen, with the expressed approval of distinguished members of Parliament has only moments ago issued the following edict:
‘the brandishing of any weapon capable of accidentally causing a person is hereby strictly prohibited by law.’

All this hate for one guy. How about the female types that slept w/ this guy? And you think Levi is alone? The majority of children, yes the majority, born to women in their 20’s are not born into marriages (at least in America). Does anyone think the stats for moms under 20 are any better? Whores and man-whores . . . they are everywhere. It is a brave, strange and decadent new world.

I’d be more outraged that he plans to name her Breeze. There’s a girl destined to be a porn star from the get go. It could be worse though. He could change his mind and name her Breeze Bushmaster Johnson.

From my previous post, please strike the word Mousering and replace with Mausering, add one comma directly after the word Mausering, or disregard the previous post and/or this one entirely.
Thank you.
( While he could have named her Remington, Winchester, or Springfield, at least he didn’t name her Smoothbore, Pepperbox or Blunderbuss.)