Terraria

Most patch notes are boring. Fixed a bug that stopped a menu from opening properly. D.Va's Defense Matrix doesn't last as long. Wukong's attack speed is 10 percent slower. That's the usual stuff, chronicling important but dull balance changes across years of a game's life. And then there are patch notes like this: "Added cat butchery." "Made all undead respectful of one another." "Tigerman does not have ears."

That's the good stuff.

Those are the kinds of wonderfully crazy patch notes Dwarf Fortress has given us over the years. Determined to top the absurdity of Dwarf Fortress's bizarre changelogs, I put on my deerstalker, grabbed my magnifying glass, and set out to find the strangest patch notes in the history of PC gaming. These absurdities are the result.

Rimworld

Alpha 12

Colonists will visit graves of dead colonists for a joy activity.

Alpha 16

New alert: Unhappy nudity

Alpha 17

Raiders will no longer compulsively attack doors.

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Conan Exiles

Patch 15.2.2017

Rhinos should no longer try to walk through players

Patch 15.2.2017

Emus now give less XP

Patch 23.02.2017

Players can no longer use chairs to travel great distances

Update 24

Imps, ostriches and other non-humanoids no longer go bonkers if you hit them with a truncheon

Update 25

Seeing dead people can now lead to great rewards

Update 28

Fixed a small issue where a player in some instances could walk underwater.

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Rust

Update 149

Bucket no longer hostile to peacekeepers

Update 152

Pumpkins only have 1 season (instead of 7)

August 28, 2014

Bald inmate digging grows hair bug fixed

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Terraria

1.2.0.2

The game will no longer look for the square root of zero.

1.2.1

Mice can no longer spawn in hell

1.2.3

Red Stucco no longer spreads corruption.

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The Sims 4

02/04/2016

Sims carving pumpkins or working at a woodworking table will no longer ignore Sims who die near them.

02/04/2016

Babies will no longer send text messages congratulating your Sims on their marriage, engagement, or pregnancy.

01/12/2017

Confident children will no longer get a whim to practice pick-up lines.

05/25/2017

Babies will no longer change skin tone when they are picked up.

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Don't Starve

January 29th 2013

Darts and poop won't magically accumulate at the world origin.

October 1st 2013

You can no longer trade with sleeping pigs.

November 19th 2013

You can properly deploy or murder captured butterflies

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Ark: Survival Evolved

254.9

Beers can no longer be eaten by Dinos

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The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion

1.2

Taking items from dead owned creatures is no longer a crime

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World of Warcraft

1.3.0

The quest NPC Khan Jehn no longer becomes confused and unresponsive

1.4.0

Roast Raptor now has an more appropriate inventory sound

2.1.0

Fixed an error where some characters appeared to be drinking while standing up

2.4.0

Zapetta will no longer become confused about whether the zeppelin in Orgrimmar is arriving or leaving

3.1.0

Yaaarrrr! now has a detailed tooltip

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Uplink

1.314

Fixed : Dead or jailed people don't answer their phones

1.35

Fixed : LAN Spoof progress graphic overflow

Fixed : Time freezing and unclickable buttons on computers running for several weeks

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Everquest

July 10, 2001

Reevaluated the values of the various fish fillets

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August 15, 2001

The Giant Tree Flayer is now Large instead of Tiny

December 6, 2001

Fixed a bug that was preventing characters from being bald

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Two Worlds 2

1.4

Horse behaviour - improved

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Battlefield 1942

1.2

Bots do not jump in and out of vehicles anymore

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Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

1.02

Dead party members will no longer show up later in the game. What with thembeing dead and all

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Black and White

1.1

The word "Death" no longer said when villagers die of old age

Creature doesn't become constipated if you punish him for pooing

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No One Lives Forever 2

1.3

Fixed problems with camera rotation after slipping on a banana

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Hitman: Codename 47

The Terraria 1.3.5 update, with support for 4K graphics, interface scale and zoom sliders, new language localizations, and a good number of bug fixes, is now live. Developer Re-Logic said the update isn't content-heavy, but "will provide a solid foundation from which we can execute our other secret Terraria update plans—and we are pretty sure you will find those exciting!"

"This update represents one part of the team's vision for what we have called 1.3.5 to this point, and is focused on polishing and fixing up some issues that have needed addressing as well as bringing some long-requested features to the game," the studio wrote. "Admittedly, it is a bit light on "more content", however, we wanted to go ahead and get these ready-to-go features out to players now rather than making everyone wait until all of the other stuff is completed."

There are some new pieces of furniture in the update and a couple of armor sets, but the big hook is the 4K support and the ability to adjust the scale of the interface and zoom in and out on the gameworld. For non-English-speaking players, the "professional localizations" are probably pretty nice too: The game now supports Russian, Simplified Chinese, Brazilian Portuguese, and Polish, along with German, Italian, French, and Spanish.

"The other part of this update will be focused on a list of things that the team feels needs a fresh look (rebalancing/tweaking/polishing) as well as some areas that we feel were overlooked or forgotten when we were working on the past several updates," Re-Logic wrote. "For now, enjoy these handful of goodies (especially our non-English speaking fans), look forward to a second round to come... and towards even bigger things down the road."

Hello Terrarians!​The dev team has been hard at work! We are excited to introduce new and improved language support/translations, 4K support, UI scale and zoom options, new furniture, a couple of armor sets, and more! This update represents one part of the team's vision for what we have called 1.3.5 to this point, and is focused on polishing and fixing up some issues that have needed addressing as well as bringing some long-requested features to the game. Admittedly, it is a bit light on "more content", however, we wanted to go ahead and get these ready-to-go features out to players now rather than making everyone wait until all of the other stuff is completed.

The other part of this update will be focused on a list of things that the team feels needs a fresh look (rebalancing/tweaking/polishing) as well as some areas that we feel were overlooked or forgotten when we were working on the past several updates. This will provide a solid foundation from which we can execute our other secret Terraria update plans - and we are pretty sure you will find those exciting!

For now, enjoy these handful of goodies (especially our non-English speaking fans), look forward to a second round to come... and towards even bigger things down the road.

Hello Terrarians!​The dev team has been hard at work! We are excited to introduce new and improved language support/translations, 4K support, UI scale and zoom options, new furniture, a couple of armor sets, and more! This update represents one part of the team's vision for what we have called 1.3.5 to this point, and is focused on polishing and fixing up some issues that have needed addressing as well as bringing some long-requested features to the game. Admittedly, it is a bit light on "more content", however, we wanted to go ahead and get these ready-to-go features out to players now rather than making everyone wait until all of the other stuff is completed.

The other part of this update will be focused on a list of things that the team feels needs a fresh look (rebalancing/tweaking/polishing) as well as some areas that we feel were overlooked or forgotten when we were working on the past several updates. This will provide a solid foundation from which we can execute our other secret Terraria update plans - and we are pretty sure you will find those exciting!

For now, enjoy these handful of goodies (especially our non-English speaking fans), look forward to a second round to come... and towards even bigger things down the road.

If you don't mind doing a lot of mining, Terraria is a expansive, absorbing open world sandbox game, and one of the best games to come out of the Minecraft craze. While '2D Minecraft' is an easy way to capture the game's essentials, under the surface it's actually a really cool sandbox RPG with exciting weapons and armour, and huge apocalyptic bosses.

It's also great in multiplayer, and there's a busy modding scene. It's a lot of game for £4.19 / $5.99.

Terraria: Otherworld [official site], the Terraria spin-off due to add “role-playing and strategy elements” to the from crafty-o-fighty sandbox, has switched developers. Terraria creators Re-Logic were unhappy with Otherworld’s pace and direction of development, so they’ve taken it off Engine Software and given it to Pipeworks Studios. Engine made most of the original Terraria’s console releases, while Pipeworks are the gang working on mobile and Switch versions. Otherworld is obviously delayed further by this, but Re-Logic say that’s better than releasing a shoddy game. … [visit site to read more]

It's been a couple of years since the announcement of Terraria: Otherworld, the followup that is not a sequel to the 2011 crafting-and-survival game Terraria. Developer Re-Logic hasn't had much to say about it since, but today it took to its forums to share some "important news." The good news is that the game is still in the works; the bad news is that co-developer Engine Software has been dropped from the project for reasons unknown, and that means it may take a little (or maybe a lot) longer than expected to get things done.

"Our team had a clear vision for this game—one that we shared with all of you with much shared excitement—and, as much as we hate to say it (and in spite of all of the reforms we tried last year) the current state of the game is still equal parts far from that vision and well behind schedule," Re-Logic wrote.

"As a result, we have made the decision to move on from having Engine Software continue development of Terraria: Otherworld. Re-Logic has possession of the game (code, art, sounds, etc.) as it exists today, and we have been examining the array of options available to us to get TOW to a place to where we can confidently deliver on the vision and expectations we all have for this game. After taking a good hard look at everything, we feel that a new and fresh start/direction is the only way Otherworld will ever reach its full potential at this point."

Pipeworks, which has been working since last year on the console and mobile version of Terraria, has now been brought on as the "development partner" on Otherworld. The two studios will "examine the entire game, from top to bottom, to see how it fits with our high expectations and core vision for this project," and while Re-Logic didn't commit to updated release timing, it did warn that the "quiet period" will likely go on for awhile longer while Pipeworks gets brought up to speed. It also promised that "a full refresh of all of the Otherworld public-facing locations" is on the way—even the Terraria: Otherworld logo is changing.

"Come whatever may, quality is simply not something we are willing to compromise on to make a quick buck. It may be painful in the short term, but our sincere hope is that it will pay off for everyone in the long term," the studio said. "Clearly, had we known this would be the scenario way back then, we would have held off on announcing the game until a later time—but such is game development. That said, we are really happy and confident with the new team and new plan—and cannot wait to get back on track."

Re-Logic said it would share more "very soon," but added that it "will not delve into some areas out of either respect or confidence or the unknown."

If Minecraft were on the Super NES, it might look something like Terraria, Re-Logic's lovely crafting sandbox RPG that launched around six years ago on PC. While the popularity of most games dwindles over the years, Terraria's fanbase has only grown in size, so it comes as little surprise to hear that it's sold over 20 million copies since its release.

Interestingly, 8.5 million of the 20.5 million copies sold have been in the last 18 months, since version 1.3 was unleashed on PC. That update is coming to consoles and mobile platforms shortly, the announcement post reveals, so if you're not playing it on PC you'll soon be able to tinker with Terraria's latest evolution, which has been gestating on desktops and laptops for a year-and-a-half now.

In the years since its release, Terraria's NPC, enemy, boss and biome counts have ballooned massively, while extra modes, events and other bits have been added to the ever-expanding sandbox too. If you're one of its 20+ million players, you might want to take a look at our Terraria mod roundup.