Last week I was making my merry way up the A31 towards Farnham when my world was completely turned on its axis as I was overtaken by what appeared to be Satan himself belching a thunderstorm, chewing on rocks and gargling an earthquake.

As the massive behemoth vanished into the distance I briefly caught a glimpse of the words “Mercedes” and the mysterious code “G63 AMG”. Once I composed myself, mopped up the dribbles and stopped drooling, I decided that perhaps I might quite like one of these.