Search This Blog

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Adjusting

It is going to be an adjusting period, maybe months, maybe years for me to get use to these changes in my life with my mother now after her stroke. I have been trying to process everything in the best way but I simply just brake down and cry in random moments in my day with her always on my mind. I have days of clarity and hope, then I have a day of such helpless overwhelming sadness. I can't imagine how my mother feels day to day as well! This is the hardest for her as she has always been able to care for everyone else in her life. Now everything is different, If I keep the focus on this grace and compassion then my mother in any moment she shares I love on her more but I have to have that same out look for the rest of my family when we get mad at each other or challenge each situation. For this is ALL so new to EVERYONE, we are all learning together. I hope I can heal more then brake down, I hope I can fix more then fight, I hope I figure out what I can help to do. This is adjusting and I hope I can, In fact I will seek out caring a New hope with me when I start to get worried or sad. My mother said she is really glad to be home, she just wants to get back to doing the things like she use to. I advised her that is why she is working so hard in her therapies to get back to that kind of independence again. I need to give myself time to heal, knowing if I am strong she can be too! When I hit up against my father or sister because I am so different from them, because I challenge them even if I wasn't trying to....when my brothers chew me out or go crazy on me I need to step back from the scene I am not helping by being there. Not until we all go through this adjustment, and give each other the respectful space each of us need. I will always love first then ask questions later. When I take things personal I honestly feel like I am going to go crazy, I need to remember this such a big change for everyone not just my mother. I am going to give peace my main focus, I hope to let everyone react the way they will as we adjust with peaceful freedom. If I can figure out how to get such peace inside my own soul, then I won't have this personal battle over the help I want to give! I have lived my life with the idea that hug heals everything and the more open, the more honest and real I am the safer people around me will feel. Perhaps with some people it does work, but it is good for me to learn other ways to live, to adjust.

Follow by Email

Share the Love

Love coming out of you is the only way to be happy!Unconditional love for yourself.You no longer resist life.You no longer reject yourself.You no longer carry the blameor the guilt.You just accept who you are, and everyone else just the way they are.You have the right to love,to smile,to be happyand to share your life!

My Husband's Blog

Grow a Garden

and let there be LIFE!

THE Farm

Lovely Lavender

Heal The wound

The only way to heal is through Forgiveness.To master forgiveness is to let go, holding on to the pain of that person only hurts. Of course the scar will always be there reminding you of what you have learned.But you will know once you have forgiven, when you hear the name or see the person who wronged you without any reaction. Like a wound that has healed when you touch it, there is no pain.Life becomes easy, because forgiveness is the only way to clean the emotional wounds.Forgiveness is the only way to heal them.

Lavender List of plants

Own Yourself

There is no problem at all with being beautiful or ugly, short or tall, thin or heavy.If you walk through a crowd of people and they tell you "Oh, you are Beautiful!"You can reply "Thank you I know." and it makes no difference to you. But if you don't believe it then you ask how is that possible to be Beautiful? You become an easy prey. Remember what is important isn't the opinion of others, but you, of yourself.

Oscar's Job

He is my Best Friend

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, Your Dog.You are his life, his love, his Leader. He will be yours, Faithful and True.To the very last beat of his hearthe understands his job, his time.YOU owe it to him to be worthyof such devotion.

Salt Spring Island in CANADA

It is such a beautiful Lavender Farm

My Thinking Cap

Fabulous Foods

Coffee Conversations

with each new day the cup holds a new taste

Cannon Beach

The place to live happily ever after.

Say YES to Life and Love

Apples to Apples

The Magic of Love

if only there was such a world...

MaryJane's Farm

How to enjoy Lavender

I am just another Dog Whisperer

Everything in this world just wants to be loved...

IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE!

Second Chance by Shinedown

My eyes are open wide And by the way, I made it Through the day I watched the world outside By the way, I'm leaving out Today Well, I just saw Hailey's Comet shooting Said why you always running In place' Even the man in the Moon disappears Somewhere in the Stratosphere [Chorus] Tell my mother, Tell my father I've done the best I can To make them realize This is my life I hope they understand I'm not angry, I'm just saying... Sometimes goodbye Is a Second Chance Please don't cry One tear for me I'm not afraid of What I have to say This is my one and Only voice So listen close, it's Only for today Well, I just saw Hailey's Comet shooting Said why you always running In place' Even the man in the Moon disappears Somewhere in the Stratosphere [Chorus] Tell my mother, Tell my father I've done the best I can To make them realize This is my life I hope they understand I'm not angry, I'm just saying... Sometimes goodbye Is a second chance Heres my chance This is my chance Tell my mother, Tell my father I've done the best I can To make them realize This is my life I hope they understand I'm not angry, I'm just saying... Sometimes goodbye Is a second chance Sometimes goodbye Is a second chance

It's a BEAUTIFUL Life!

The magic begins

The Power of LOVE

In this World we see both good and bad things, we can have both good or bad thoughts. We live in good or bad days with good or bad feelings. In this World we can choose to be good or to be bad. But the sadness that separates us from each other or brings us close together gives us strength to know what Happiness really is, how the world moves us along. How anger can eat away our day and create more pain. How fear can keep us delayed from what our lives should gain. How important is the power of LOVE when it comes to that very simple choice? In this world LOVE connects all things together for the good, for the joy and for the Happiness of Life!

Honor the Power of LOVE.

"The Strength that is in me is stronger then the fear that surrounds me."-my slogan in 2006

Energy of the Mind

Every day we awake with a certain amount of mental. emotional, and physical energy that we spend throughout the day.If we allow our emotions to deplete our energy, we have no strength to change our lives or give to others.Use your imagination to tell a story of Love, of Bliss and of Hope!See how love moves in the trees, coming from the sky, and saving you from fear.