Tag Archives: papa john

THE BEASMAN more indictments
HEY LARRY, DID ANY OF YOUR U OF SMELL CARDINAL BUDDIES GIT INDICTED TODAY? (laffs) THE DAY AIN’T OVER YET! (laffs) WHY DON’T YOU JUST KILL YOURSELF, LARRY? YOUR CARDINAL PROGRUM IS IN ASHES. THE U OF SMELL DUMPSTER FIRE AIN’T NEVER GONNA GO OUT CUZ THE NC2A IS A-COMIN WITH THE DEATH PENALTY! DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAATH PENALTY! (laffs) I LOVE IT!

I SEEN THEY INDICTED CHUCK PERSON FOR ALL THAT SHOE PIMP MONEY BRIBERY STUFF. AND THEY GOT THAT FANCY SUIT MAN, TOO. YOU AND ALL YOUR CARDINAL BUDDIES IS HOPIN THAT THE SUIT MAN IS GONNA TURN ON HIS CLIENTS CONNECTED TO U UH KAY LIKE THE HARRISON TWINS, TONY ORLANDO ANTIGUA DAWN, AND WORLDWIDE WES.

Andrew and Aaron Harrison with Rashan Michel

LARRY, AIN’T NONE OF THEM PEOPLE CONNECTED TO NO SHOE PIMP MONEY. ONLY U OF SMELL RUM DUMMIES IS STOOPID ENOUGH TO SET IN A HO-TEL ROOM AND SQUAWK ABOUT SECRET PAYMENTS WITH A FBI AGENT SETTIN THEIR RECORDIN IT THROUGH HIS LAPEL DAISY. BUT THE U OF SMELL GUY JORDAN FAIR WAS SINGIN LIKE A BIRD ABOUT GITTIN MONEY FOR HIS CARDINAL REE-CRUITS. BUSTED!

YOU’RE FIRED AND SO IS SLICK RICK BUTEENO, A NO COUNT TRAITIOR TURNCOAT, I-TALIAN FRAUD. AND EVEN TOMMY TURTLENECK GOT CAUGHT IN THE BEARTRAP CUZ PAPA JOHN IS CALLIN THE SHOTS AT U OF SMELL AND HE DON’T LIKE NO SLICK RICK OR TURTLENECK SO THEY IS DEAD AND GONE!

PAPA JOHN IS THE NEW U UH KAY HERO SO AS SOON AS RUMP ARENER CAN TEAR UP THAT CONTRACT WITH THE GAS STATION PIZZA COMPANY, WE GONNA PUT PAPA JOHN BACK IN RUMP ARENER.

HIM AND COACH CAL IS GOOD BUDDIES SO PAPA JOHN IS THINKIN ABOUT GITTIN RID OF BOBBY PETRINKO NEXT. HE DONE GOT RID THE LACROSSE LADY CUZ SHE EATS AT PIZZER HUT. COACH CAL – HE GOES TO MASS EVER DAY – HE SAYS HE HOPES U OF SMELL GITS BACK ON TRACK BUT YOU KNOW HE DON’T REALLY MEAN THAT. (laffs) HE WAKES UP LAFFING EVER DAY THINKIN ABOUT HOW U OF SMELL GOT A BOY COACH AND A BUNCH OF WARSHED UP RUM DUMMY ASSISTANTS.

OH LARRY…Y’ALL BEAT BELLARMINE! WOW! THAT’S A BIG ACCOMPLISHMENT! AND THAT DING DONG DELL DUNK WAS #1 ON THE EXPN TOP TEN! WOW! HE JUMPED ALMOST HALF AS HIGH AS DONNERVAN MITCHELL (WHO WAS SMART ENOUGH TO RUN AWAY FROM U OF HELL). YOU GO, DING DONG DELL!

THAT’S SOME BIGTIME STUFF CONSIDERIN THE ONLY OTHER SPART ON LAST NIGHT WAS HARSESHOES AND PING PONG.

Y’ALL AIN’T ALL GLOOM AND DOOM LARRY…WELL, UNLESS THE FBI SHOWS UP ON SLICK RICK’S PARCH TONIGHT WITH ANOTHER INDICTMENT! (laffs) IS WE SAD THAT U UH KAY LOST THAT FOOTBAW GAME? NOPE! IT’S STILL FUN THINKIN ABOUT U OF SMELL’S MELTDOWN.

BASKETBAW GOIN OUT OF BIDNIZ. YOUR HEISHMAN TROPHY WINNER RACKS UP A THOUSAND YARDS EVER GAME BUT YOU STILL LOSE BY 30 POINTS! WHO DOES THAT? (laffs) EVER DAY IS ZIPITY DO DAH HAP, HAP, HAPPY TIMES IN WILDCAT COUNTRY! WE GOIN TO BOWL GAME AND U OF SMELL GOIN TO NC2A PRISON. (knock knock sound on your microphone) OH LARRY! IS SOMEBODY AT THE DOOR? I BETCHA THAT’S THE FBI BRINGIN YOU A INDICTMENT FOR BEIN A FRAUD RADIO GUNOUNCER, TWO-BIT, TRAITOR TURNCOAT, BOOTLICKIN SLICK RICK APOLOGIST. (laffs)

LARRY, DON’T LET EM TAKE YOU ALIVE! GO DUNK YOUR HEAD IN THE KITCHEN SINK AND JUST KEEP YOUR HEAD UNDERWATER TIL YOU STOP WIGGLIN. THAT’S THE ONLY HONORABLE THING TO DO…AND THEN FINALLY WE CAN GIT MATT JONES TO BE THE AFTERNOON SUPERSTAR ON WH&S WHERE HE TAWKS ABOUT WILDCAT GREATNESS INSTEAD OF U OF SMELL CRIMES. COME ON, DEATH PENALTY! GIT HERE! THIS WILL BE THE GREATEST CHRISTMAS EVER…THEY GONNA YANK DOWN THAT FAKE NEWS CHAMPERCHIP BANNER AND PUT IN A SHREDDER SO WE CAN ALL MAKE CHRISTMAS TREE TINSEL OUT OF IT! HO, HO, HO! I AIN’T HO HO HO’ING ABOUT CHRISTMAS…I WAS JUST SAYIN HI TO ALL THEM SKANKY U OF SMELL STRIPPERS! HAVE A HOLLY JOLLY CHRISTMAS IN PRISON, CARDINALS! AWWWWWW C-A-T-S CATS! CATS! CATS! GO BIG BLUE! GO CATS! FARDY & OH! FARDY & OH! FARDY & OH!