Far more than the vast majority of people that see this tweet will shake their heads in disbelief. Honestly, I don't blame them. It's completely disingenuous to publicly take pride in the accomplishments of your conference foes when all your team did was drag down their strength of schedule. I can definitely see why people would find it strange that a school that was easily the worst amongst their peers would celebrate those largely mediocre peers when they defied the entirety of their average seasons by somehow dominating college basketball's biggest stage. There is, however, one thing that can also be said about all those people that thought this was a tone deaf act of social media outreach...

They now remember that Rutgers is in the Big Ten. It an egregious example of self worth by association, but at least it came when that association was at it's apex. It may be thee most immoral of moral victories. That said, the entire ACC only had one more actual tournament win than Rutgers throughout Saturday and Sunday, and that's the type of close loss that the Scarlet Knights have no problem hanging their hat on!

And here I was thinking that Rutgers was going to circumcise their coaching search by cutting it down to only qualified candidates with decorated histories in the ranks of college football from the tip. I'm almost ashamed of myself for letting an entire decade of dissapointment make me pessimistic about the direction they are heading in. They didn't hesitate to turnover nearly every ball this past season so why would I expect them not to turn over every stone in hopes that next best offensive mind in collegiate athletics would be waiting patiently unemployed underneath? How silly of me to believe they wouldn't explore all options instead of limiting themselves to highly accomplished individuals who have proven capable through years upon years of service to programs that are probably far more storied than the one that's looking for help on their website. Sure, on the surface it seems like seeking out established targets with impressive resumes would be the ideal way of adding to your staff. However, if someone thinks they are too good to apply online with hundreds of other unequipped jackasses who had enough time on their hands to fill out a "Sign up for a credit card and get this poorly made t-shirt free!"-esque application for a job they stand next to know chance of getting do you really want to hire them? That's what I thought.

We already went the young, promising mind with a decent resume route with Drew Mehringer, and that returned easily the worst offense in the history of football at any level. Granted, he wasn't given much to work with, but I have reason to believe that any old jamoke with WiFi and a decent player rating on XBox Live! could have orchestrated an offense that put up more than ZERO points in a third of their games so it couldn't hurt to give them a fair shake.

P.S. It's a good thing my faith in Chris Ash to turn Rutgers into a competitor in the Big Ten is everlasting (because he's literally the final hope for respectability), or the state of Rutgers football - and their....uhh...."all inclusive" search for an offensive coordinator - would really concern me.

DailyTargum- The Rutgers University Police Department is looking for a vandal who has been spray painting penises on several buildings and sidewalks across the Livingston and Cook/Douglass campus.

Depictions of a popular meme known as "Dick Butt" began appearing on Douglass campus near Hickman Hall, on Livingston campus near Tillet Hall, the Livingston Student Center and the Livingston Plaza bus stop and on Cook campus near the Newell Apartments.

University spokesperson Greg Trevor said Rutgers police are searching for the vandal. University Facilities and Capital Planning have been notified to remove the graffiti.

Shivani Patel, a School of Arts and Sciences first-year student, said when she first saw the drawings about three weeks ago, she was reminded of the immaturity of some college students.

"Incidents like these take me back to high school," Patel said. "Rutgers has such a huge name and the University needs to stay up to its name."

​I tried to tell everyone the move to the Big Ten wasn't just about football. Sure, getting our dicks kicked into our butts during a nationally televised primetime game was the primary motivation for realigning conferences. However, the money that getting slaughtered by - conservatively speaking - 832 points the last two weeks provides was undoubtedly going to improve the university academically as well.

Well, ladies and gentleman, vindication has never made me chuckle so shamelessly! If a meme that manages to incorporate multiple no-no places isn't proof positive that the student body is progressing in the classroom than I don't know what is. The learning has never been higher! The minds of the undergrads never so saturated with brilliantly phallic innovations!

Just take a look at it. It's a dick.....AND a butt! The best of both worlds! What more could you for?! Thank God the police won't rest until they find the "vandal" (Also See: Arteest). It would be the damnedest of shames if he didn't get the credit he deserved. I bet the illustrator didn't even realize he was going to transport Shivani Patel back to her high school glory days when he started rounding off the asscheeks on an erect penis. So many unforeseen benefits to the popularization of 'Dick Butt'. Almost makes me wish I was a 20 year old with an everlasting buzz so I could take in the beauty of these veiny, triumphant sons-of-bitches in person...

I knew it. I just knew it. If I looked long and hard enough there was a surely a positive to be found after watching my alma mater's football team get smacked around their own yard like their father didn't deem their lawn cutting sufficient. I thought that positive came when I heard that none of the committed recruits walked directly into Chris Ash's office, pulled down their pants, took a fat shit in a paper bag, and proceeded to light it on fire, but it looks like I couldn't have been more wrong!

Turns out the bright side to watching your team lose by ELEVEN touchdowns at home during primetime is that you might just make a high end steakhouse retract their promotional promise and potentially throw the culinary landscape of an entire city out of whack. Rutgers got flat out owned by Michigan, but by Thursday night they might be able to own the business space that the Ann Arbor Ruth's Chris currently occupies. Enjoy that final filet Wolverines fans, because it's about to be 'Outback' for the foreseeable future after Ruth's Chris spends the entirety of their rent money paying for celebratory steaks.

Out-gained 600-39? Gave up well over 400 rushing yards? Nine rushing touchdowns? Only managed to gain two first downs of their own on FIVE total passing yards? That outright athletic molestation is a small price to pay to make sure that the discount meat that they are getting as a prize is the last slab they have for a long, LONG time. A 78 point shoutout is certainly a number to be proud of, but they'll be wishing they started taking knees at 25-0 when Applebee's has another Ann Arbor location. In this case, revenge is a dish last served medium rare.

Uproxx- Hours after a website released a video that shows him drinking a beer at a student tailgate, Rutgers Athletics Director Pat Hobbs apologized for his actions and told NJ Advance Media he was trying to restore order to what was turning out to be an unruly atmosphere.

"My first concern is always for the safety and well-being of our students,'' Hobbs said. "Anyone who was at the (student tailgate) Saturday knows that I was acting to ensure that.''

On Aug. 31, Rutgers announced that it would sponsor a student tailgate at football home games this season. Dubbed "the Alley,'' the tailgate was located in a gravel lot across from the Werblin Recreation Center on the Busch Campus, approximately 400 yards from High Point Solutions Stadium.

On Tuesday, the university athletics department announced that it would be shutting down the student tailgate at home games for the remainder of the season, issuing a statement that read: "Regrettably, due to safety concerns, The Alley is no longer available for student tailgating.''

Wait, so Rutgers shut down their school sponsored tailgate student tailgate because a grown man - that was trying to make himself relatable to a bunch of kids - took a couple sips of beer? Is that what happened here, or was Rutgers scared that it looked like their brand new Athletic Director was endorsing the use of alcohol and felt they needed to take action? Either way, what I just watched was about the most harmless thing I have ever seen. Assuming, of course, that it's common knowledge that college kids are going to get blind drunk prior to football games. I mean, am I in the minority here? I get that nothing good comes out of an authority figure standing on a truck and begrudgingly having a drink with thousands of students that were undoubtedly filming him, but it's not like he was funneling beers with teenagers like 'Frank The Tank'. He wasn't slurring his words or going streaking. He wasn't dumping drinks down co-eds throats while chanting "SHOTS! SHOTS SHOTS!" like he was in a Lil' Jon video. He simply acquiesced to a group of kids to get them to calm down a little bit. It probably didn't work because - well - it was a goddamn tailgate, but I'm going to stop short of saying he incited whatever shitshow ensued.

Plus, I know it's a small sample size but the video in question didn't exactly scream "safety concerns" to me. Actually seemed pretty tame considering the circumstances. At the very least I would venture to guess that any alternative in which they weren't being looked over by school officials would be infinitely more dangerous. I'm not saying that it was a good idea for Rutgers to involve itself with a game day activity that is nothing more than binge drinking for sport, but if they were going to do so then they should have been prepared for there to be beer present. Seems like a panic move to put a stop to it because your AD publicly acknowledged the existence of alcohol when attendance at the event you put together is predicated - almost solely - on the existence of alcohol.

And here I was thinking that there is nothing more obnoxious than someone boasting about how much money they make. Boy, did my alma mater really make me look stupid for thinking that someone publicizing their own financial security on social media is the most surefire sign of insecurity. I mean, that doesn't even remotely compare to the complex inferiority that a State University has to have about it's basketball team to gloat about the cumulative money made by players that went to other universities and were at one time coached by people who were at one time employed by said university. I wouldn't blame you if you turned back now, because I almost got lost in the maze of that ridiculous pattern of thinking like 3 different times while I was typing that sentence. That not-so-humble brag nearly defied the concept of '6 degrees of separation', and - since I don't expect people to know too much about Rutgers basketball - it was the perfect representation of a program that has been an undeniable atrocity.

I really need to have a talk with the intern that was asked to run these numbers. Surely there are more productive ways for him to earn credits than by trying to make Rutgers men's basketball look like it's worth more than the pot they piss in. I'm impressed that someone in the the athletic department had the creativity to think of a way to VERY loosely connect the Scarlet Knights hoops team with a 10 figure monetary value, but I am certainly not impressed by the man hours it UNDOUBTEDLY took to get there. Some poor bastard was probably sitting on Google for a motherfucking week looking at the resumes of every graduate assistant that spent more than 5 minutes employed by Rutgers. He could have written a fucking thesis on the destitute state of his school's basketball team in the time it took him to do the intricate research and math necessary to craft one tweet that was supposed to make them look prosperous but instead made them look laughable. Christ Almighty Rutgers, act like conference play just started and DO LESS.

P.S. I almost want this to be intentional just to get a rise out of people, but we are talking about the same program that hired Eddie Jordan as an "alumni" and then found out he never actually graduated 5 minutes after he signed on the dotted line. I won't put any amount of stupidity past them.

Ahh, I am going to miss having a personable, relatable President that can easily adapt to his surroundings. Now obviously he was coached up on what to make sure he "knew" about Rutgers University. I highly doubt he's drunkenly devoured a fat sandwich before, and something tells me the secret service didn't get away with sneaking him into Olde Queens for a pre-speech cocktail. That said, it was pretty damn impressive hearing him go on and on about Rutgers traditions without sounding like they were completely foreign to them. Maybe it's because I have gotten used to listening to his potential successors fail to go more than 5 minutes on the campaign trail without a "wait...what?!?" moment, but every single time Barack Obama speaks nowadays he sounds more and more like a rational human being. A little bit of sports knowledge. A little bit of history. Some self deprecating humor about his wife. I feel like everyone, including the President of the United States, should have had a beer in their hand for that opening monologue, because there was something inherently inclusive and reminiscent about. Barack Obama may not know the State University of New Jersey from that football-less disgrace for a college in South Orange, but he sounded like he did in delivering a commencement speech that - for once - didn't have people on the verge of yawns. He gave a proper send off to the class of 2016, and reminded us all that by the time 2017 rolls around this whole country is fucked.

CentralJersey- On the same day Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh is scheduled to host a satellite football camp at Paramus Catholic High School, Ohio State coach Urban Meyer and Temple coach Matt Rhule will join Rutgers coach Chris Ash for a satellite camp of their own on Fairleigh Dickinson University’s Florham Park campus. Both camps are slated for June 8, the day before Harbaugh is scheduled to deliver a commencement speech at Paramus Catholic.

“I think Coach Ash has made it abundantly clear that he wants to ‘Fence the Garden,’ which is one of his mantras, and certainly when someone comes into our state and tries to run a satellite camp, you want to make that type of situation available to our own athletes,” MyCentralJersey.com football analyst Marcus Borden, an NJSIAA and NJFCA Hall of Fame mentor said.

“I think it’s a very creative move by Coach Ash and his staff. What a great countermove by Rutgers.”

Michigan has emerged as the leading out-of-state option for New Jersey high school football recruits, a pipeline that was built under Ash’s predecessor Kyle Flood and one that the current Rutgers coach would like to shut down.

Bringing in Ohio State is a logical step given the Ohio State-Michigan rivalry and Ash's close friendship with Meyer. Ash spent the past two seasons as Ohio State's defensive coordinator and has adopted several Meyer-started ideas at Rutgers.

The best thing I can say about Chris Ash's decision to team up with Urban Meyer and hold an in-state satellite camp 30 miles away on the same day as Jim Harbaugh is that it doesn't feel like real life. Six months ago the sky way falling all over the Rutgers football program. Players were getting arrested by the half dozen. It's "Head Coach" was getting suspended for academic dishonesty. The actual product on the field was as embarrassing as we've seen since the days prior to the arrival of Greg Schiano. The team felt like it had maxed out on it's potential and was bound to end up a Big Ten bottom feeder for the foreseeable future. Walking out of that stadium after blowing a 20+ point lead to a crappy Maryland team in the last game of a non-bowl eligible season was as hopeless a feeling as I have had as a sports fan. This might be quite the statement considering Rutgers less-than-rich history, but it felt like a sharp decline to the rockiest of bottoms was all but imminent.

Well, they haven't played a single meaningful snap since that dreary, rainy afternoon, and Chris Ash already has Rutgers teaming up with one of the most prestigious programs in the nation in hopes of counterpunching a recruitment effort by another one of the most prestigious programs in the nation. I can't guarantee that Chris Ash ends up being a great Head Coach, but I feel comfortable saying he's done everything in his power - and more - to right a ship that seemed to be navigating it's way straight into an iceberg. You can ignore the new wave of high profile in-state recruits, the complete overhaul of the facilities, and the new look jerseys. Rutgers has pulled off such feats (to varying degrees) before. What Rutgers undoubtedly has not done, throughout their entire history, is have their name mentioned in accord with championship track records.

Rutgers football is working in conjunction with Urban Meyer. They are proactively challenging the popularity of Jim Harbaugh. Fishing from the same pool of players as programs with some of the richest traditions in college football. Read the beginning of this paragraph out loud. Shit doesn't even sound remotely logical given the state of Rutgers football this past December. Chris Ash hasn't coached a single game so it remains to be seen what he is capable of on the sidelines, but he's completely flipped the trajectory of the program and that's far more than I expected him to accomplish in such a short amount of time. Ohio State doesn't have room for all the talent, and having the vote of confidence from one of the best coaches in the country can only pay dividends. Especially when it sends a message to the competition that Chris Ash's sights are set on his own state and his expectations are set so far beyond anything Rutgers fans could have even dreamed of at the end of last season.
​

I'll be the first person to admit that I am biased. Chris Ash could have trotted out a bunch of players in red pinnies with taped on numbers and I would have been on both knees bowing in awe of his originality. That's just where I am as a Rutgers supporter. Kyle Flood broke me down as a fan. He brought me to the lowest of lows. Chris Ash has scooped me up out of my own self pity and carried me to towards the light. I really have no choice but to admire every decision that he makes with the Rutgers football program since we are in the wake of his footprints in the sand. I am just along for the ride, and - despite not seeing a snap of meaningful football - it's been a fairly encouraging one so far.

These new uniforms - that bring a traditional feel with a modern look - are just another step in the right direction. I won't lie and say and I didn't enjoy Rutgers few seasons as the poor man's Oregon of the East. It was cool having a new color combination to look forward to almost every week. The fact that you could barely make out the silver numbers certainly took it's toll on the waning eyesight of the older generations of Rutgers fans, but they were still a welcomed change when they were first introduced. I won't say that change wore out it's welcome, but the incorporation of the throwback uniforms last last year certainly opened my eyes to how the Scarlet Knights were - well - no longer wearing scarlet. Considering how much work had to be done with this team I was certainly surprised that jerseys made their way on to the agenda, but now that I have seen the final product I am glad they did. The shoulder stripes, armored sleeves, and sharp numbers add a new twist to an old look that embraces the bold simplicity that once took the field in Piscataway - and more importantly - has staying power.

​A funny thing happened as I sat in the stands of Highpoint Solutions Stadium on Saturday night. I was relatively sober (in comparison to my usual state when I step in the building). Just looking to take in some meaningless football, enjoy the environment, and see a couple players stand out from the rest. Wasn't about to get emotional over a play or two in a glorified scrimmage. That's what my intentions were anyway.

Then it happened; Chris Laviano threw a screen pass about 5 yards over the head of an unexpecting wide receiver. Now it goes against every fiber of my being to do this, but I will give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe the wide receiver screwed up the route - which was essentially to jog 3 feet to his right and stand still. Maybe - JUST MAYBE - it wasn't the quarterback's fault at all. That's what my brain was thinking but - as is usually the case - my mouth beat me to it. I let out a "You gotta be fucking kidding me! This guy is going to fucking kill me!" without hesitation. I am not going to sit here and tell you I know what it's like for a military veteran to recover from the traumatic experience of going to war, but I can confidently say that that exact moment was the closest thing I have felt to PTSD. It brought me right back to last season. The 6 dreadful hours I spent sitting in the rain at Penn State and Wisconsin combined. The 3.5 dreadful hours I spent sitting in the rain in Piscataway as Kyle Flood let a 20+ point lead slip away against Maryland in what turned out to be his final farewell to the fan base. The comical stat line of the Rutgers starting quarterback in those games.

Judging by the reaction from within a three row radius (hearty laughter), I can only imagine that many others felt just the way I did. I don't think Chris Laviano is as bad a quarterback as he showed last year. I don't think any one player on the team is as bad as they were last year. That said, I'm not sure I have it in my heart to give the man that caused me so much anguish (mostly as a result of his braindead Head Coach's undying faith in him) another chance. He overthrew a touchdown pass by about 5 yards on Saturday and I almost started to get excited that he actually recached the receiver. Then I realized what I was celebrating and it only made me more mad. With every incomplete pass I felt my blood start to boil. The visions of his Instagram post where he told the Rutgers faithful that he didn't give a fuck about them dancing through my head. I think I even caught a vision of a soaking wet Kyle Flood clapping in his visor on the far sideline. I don't think I can survive another season of it. Not when there is a quarterback with 10x talent waiting in the wings. Now, Hayden Rettig wasn't exactly Joe Montana at the Spring Game, but he did flash the ability that had so many Rutgers fans desperately tweeting #FreeRettig last year. If Chris Ash starts Chris Laviano I will support his decision, but when heart palpitations force me to keel over and die by halftime of Week 1 he will have my blood on his hands and be out a season ticket holder. Be forewarned.

And there is the difference - the Chris Ash difference. It's not that we haven't seen these cutesy, team building, "boys being boys" videos from Rutgers football before. It's just that it used to be the ONLY thing we used to see. We would see the team being cohesive off the field, not the team doing the grunt work to become cohesive on the field. I obviously don't know the inner working of a Kyle Flood run spring practice just as I don't know the inner workings of a Chris Ash run spring practice. I do know that I have seen far more videos of these guys being molded into tough, aggressive football players than I have of them letting loose and enjoying the fruit of their labors. Never in a million years could I imagine Kyle Flood running a 'Ring Of Honor' drill that did such a good job of testing the pure will of the players. Let's just say no one was fighting tooth and nail over a truck tire in the wee hours of the morning the last few years. If there's one thing that's been shockingly obvious throughout this regime's short tenure it is a drastic uptick in intensity. Now, it's important to keep things light every once and a while - and Chris Ash obviously understands that - but the difference is that now it's clear that they are being forced to earn every one of those opportunities. Boy did they look like they enjoyed every second of this opportunity.

NJ.com- Chris Ash game-planned for Rutgers in each of the past three seasons as an opposing defensive coordinator. And each time Ash put on Rutgers' game film, he had the same complaint that has been echoed by fans since the program introduced a new uniform style in 2012: He couldn't read the numbers.​"It was terrible," Ash said in an interview with NJ Advance Media on Tuesday. "The times I coached against Rutgers, that was like the No. 1 thing: When you're trying to identify personnel coming in the game and you can't see the damn numbers."

"I just look at: Does Ohio State have 15 uniforms? No. Does Alabama? No. Does Michigan? No. Does USC? No," Ash said. "You look at some of the traditional best football programs around the country and they have an identifiable, clean, first-class look and that's what I want us to have."

"I think there were some conversations already in the works about some new uniforms," Ash said.

"When I got here I was fortunate to get in on the front end of it and make changes with uniforms and helmets. I'm a traditionalist. I'm not a guy that likes 15 different uniforms and 15 different helmets. I want a look that's classy, that's identifiable, that people really think looks sharp. We're going to hopefully have that type of look."

I know, I know Rutgers fans. I fell quickly in love with the (relatively) new jerseys the Scarlet Knights have been wearing. I thought the 45 different color combinations were something that fit in perfectly with the landscape of college football. However, what I didn't realize was that it was costing us football games. It's cool to think about becoming the Oregon of the East until you remember that the Oregon of the West has come up short of winning a National Championship time and time again. I have no choice but to believe their failures have nothing to do with running a cutesy spread offense that falters against the nation's best defenses, and everything to do with their obsession with how they look. If Chris Ash has taught me anything since his arrival it's that you can't create a traditionalist culture without concerning yourself with the cosmetic. The phrase "Look Good. Feel Good. Play Good" doesn't make one single mention of being great, and that's what this new era of Rutgers football is geared towards. If that means we have to get back to wearing jerseys that are clean, bold, recognizable, and well - actually scarlet then so be it. I wholehearted support Chris Ash's decision. Not only because I will wholeheartedly support every goddamn decision he makes until it costs us a victory, but because I didn't realize how much I missed the old jerseys until they made a couple guest appearances last season. Plus, it can't do anything but help wash the stink off from the Kyle Flood era. The program might not fully be cleansed of it until after some football is played, but a renovated look will provide quite the Mexican shower.

Now I know that this isn't exactly '1+1=2' situation, but the last Rutgers offseason video I watched was of them having a dance battle before running off to an ice cream truck. Obviously the circumstances surrounding each video are vastly different, but I can't help but think this team is going to play with more of an edge when they are nearly fighting to the death in early March. Not saying I could go out there and survive a Kyle Flood training camp or anything, but I am saying I would last a whole lot longer than I would in a Chris Ash training camp. This team has lacked fundamentals for years and at least some of that was due to their preparation, or lack thereof. Well, nothing speaks to them getting back to basics like engaging in forms of competition that were generally reserved for cavemen. You want to prove that you have what it takes to make this team a winner? Good, use brute strength and determination to wrestle this fucking tire out of the arms of your teammate at 5:30 in the morning. Use every ounce of energy you have to drag your teammate across the mat using a heavy rope. No one ever questioned this team's closeness, they questioned their heart, and by the looks of things, Chris Ash has been blending those together nicely. ​

NJ.com- "Kyle is a great guy," Ash said. "I don't know him, but I've met him on the recruiting trails and shaken his hands in schools and things like that. I had nice conversations with him.

"I didn't really feel like there was a need to have a conversation about what's happened here and why. I'm not really concerned about what's happened in the past. I'm coming to do business the way I think it needs to be done.

"If there are things that have been done here that I like, I'll keep it," he said. "If things are not what I like, then I'm blowing it up and moving on. That's just the way we're doing it."

"That's what I'm here to do," he said. "I'm here to change the way business has been done and get it on more of a championship level or a Big Ten East level, and hopefully change the results in the process."

Chris Ash you sly dog you. I knew this guy was a multifaceted talent, but I didn't know he was this adept at churning out fake pleasantries. This was like high school chicks complimenting each other at the lunch table "nice". This was like Kobe Bryant retirement tour "nice". This was hold the door open for someone only to find out they aren't even attempting to get to it in a timely manner "nice". It was slow down and let a person cut you off in traffic "nice". If everyone was honest with themselves then their reactions would be drastically different than they usually are in those situations. Chris Ash just took a laughable question, and gave one of the most genuinely considerate answers I have ever heard, and it made me think more highly of him as a person.

​You know what he should have said? He should have said "I didn't contact Kyle Flood because I don't need to know what not to do". He should have said "I didn't contact Kyle Flood because a real military captain wouldn't contact Tom Hanks when trying to learn how to best do his job". He should have said "why would I contact the former ringleader of a three ring circus to find out how to run a a successfully Big Ten college football program?". He should have said "I don't take tips from people that wear visors when they know it is going to rain".

​Make no mistake, Kyle Flood and Chris Ash have technically held the same job title, but the latter is the only one with a plan of living up to the description. There's literally not one single thing that Kyle Flood could say to Chris Ash that could potentially benefit Rutgers football going forward. Not his utterly baffling endorsement of Chris Laviano as a starting quarterback. Not his signature cliches for postgame press conferences. Not even his not-so-subtle process of going about getting a student athlete's grade changed so that he's eligible to play football. I'm praying that Chris Ash won't need to elicit the help of Kyle Flood's uncanny ability to look like he's sailing peacefully along as the entire ship is sinking beneath his feet. Let's hope he doesn't need instructions on how to casually sip his morning coffee as a dumpster fire closes in around him. When Chris Ash is preaching about the togetherness of his team I would like to think he won't be doing it as half the roster sits in a prison cell, and therefore every lesson Kyle Flood could possibly teach is from an outdated curriculum. This program is unquestionably better off setting every one of Elmer Flood's lesson plans aflame. No reason to keep the bath water when you've finally gotten rid of the baby...

NJ.com- Now, it is all streamlined and neat, and without question, more impressive. The gray paint on the walls, Ash said, made the place "feel like a prison," so that has all been replaced with a plain white.

"A lot of the stuff in here is old. It's old, and it needs to change, and we're working on it now."

"Everybody thinks that the facility here is outstanding. I'll tell you: It's not," Ash said during a wide-ranging interview as the sun rose last Thursday. "Just look around. This is not on par with what Ohio State, Michigan, Michigan State and Penn State have.

"Is it on par with Boston College, Temple, Syracuse and UConn? Yeah, but we don't play those teams any more."

Some of this is even less noticeable to the unobservant eye. Ash looks out his office window every day and sees that the light poles outside the practice facility are tilted. "You've got old lights that look like, when you turn them on, they're going to smoke," he said. "It's not a good presentation in recruiting."

This is the priority for Ash. He already has brought in new equipment to get the team started for its offseason workout program, but the plan is to "completely wipe it out when the semester is over." Ash will change the floor, the weight racks, the equipment and, most of all, the presentation.

"We can't do what's been done in the past and expect our results to change in the future," Ash said during a wide-ranging hour-long interview in his office. "It's not going to happen. We can't keep doing business the same way."

So Ash already has changed how Rutgers players will eat. He has made it so players can get healthy foods 24 hours a day, which is allowable under NCAA rules but never offered before in Piscataway.

Now, in the coming months, he wants to change where they live. Ash said the dorms where the football players are housed, which were built in 1974, are "not on par with what other student athletes in top programs live in" and keep coming up as a negative on the recruiting trail.

"I just know when I look at it, and I look at what could happen in those dorms, it's just not good," he said. "All I can envision is just stuff that's not good."

"You've got to have full alignment by the staff and the support staff. Those are things we're trying to do," he said. "It's no secret: This place was not aligned right, with the football and the support staff and the athletic department."

​Boy, don't I feel stupid. All season I was clamoring for Kyle Flood to get fired because his stupidity cost him a three game suspension, and his lack of intuitional control over his team had his entire defensive backfield sitting behind bars. Turns out those were the least of Rutgers worries. I didn't even know that the coaches were basically working in a penitentiary. No one told me that the players were living in squaller and being fed like they were in a 1960's orphanage. Almost not even their fault that half of them got arrested last year. Their decision to loot and pillage drugs from off campus houses and physically assault anyone that questioned their motives was a direct result of their environment. Who knew that the place where student athletes can best relieve their stress - the gym - was basically a glorified Retro Fitness. Facilities on par with UConn and Syracuse?! Jesus Christ, this team has been living like homeless people, no wonder their actions on and off the field have been nothing short of criminal.

I gotta be honest, I almost felt insulted for a second. You know, until I realized the person disparaging every single aspect of Rutgers football has committed himself to the program for the foreseeable future. These criticisms are like the criticisms that your significant other starts giving you after you pledge your life to one another in marriage. Sure, they might seem a little mean, but they are made out of love, and more importantly they are rooted in truth.

Does Chris Ash seem a little bit over the top? Absolutely. Can't say I would have noticed an off kilter light post or a little bit of rust on an ice machine, but that's what makes Chris Ash the man trusted to rebuild Rutgers football and me the person that sarcastically writes about him. He's basically the football version of that bitch from 'Devil Wears Prada'. He's meticulous, unwavering, and detail oriented. A real stickler for things that the average person would pay no mind. Probably makes him a real son-of-a bitch to have as a father, but it's something that could very well make him a hell of a Head Coach. What you call fussy I call conscientious, and that's the type of attitude that it takes to run a successful business. Big Ten football is serious business, and I can't say there is a man I would rather have in charge of getting Rutgers a promotion than Chris Ash.

What? You think I am going to apologize on behalf of my alma mater's basketball team? You think I am going to clown them for looking like they hit the pipe too hard and feel asleep at the wheel mid game? Hell no. Rutgers isn't winning any Big Ten championships in hoops anytime soon. The only 'Big Dance' they are partaking in resides in the basement of some off campus apartment. National Invitation Tournament? Thanks, but no thanks. Definitely won't be receiving any 'Save The Date', but even if they did the Scarlet Knights probably wouldn't even RSVP out of apathy. They aren't worried about silly little things like winning college basketball games. That's not in Eddie Jordan's job description. He is preparing his players for the next level. Sure, there is only a microscopic chance that even one of them every even gets close to sniffing a D-League team, but you can bet your ass they will be properly groomed if they do. Won't have any idiots jumping in to grab rebounds after the first of two foul shots. I hope potential recruits (that will undoubtedly choose to play elsewhere) were watching, because all that video showed me was that Rutgers Basketball has it's players best interests at heart. No, you don't show up to the banks expecting to win any basketball games, but you'll learn the most basic rule difference that exists between college and the pros. The whole idea of the 1 and 1 is stupid anyway. It takes a real next level head coach to teach his players not to abide by it, and that's exactly what happened here. How do I know, you ask? Come on, what seems more likely, strategically turning the ball over or all five players on the court failing to realize that it was live in the first place?

P.S. If Michigan had any integrity they would have insisted that Rutgers be able to take the ball out. Penalizing them for negligence is like disciplining a deaf kid for a false start at the Special Olympics. A well coached deaf kid, that is...

Full disclosure? I am concerned. No, it's not because Drew Mehringer is only 28 years old. By all accounts he is one of the most promising young minds in the sport. No, I'm not even concerned because he hasn't coached in a conference as prestigious as the Big Ten. His resume, which is littered with some the most efficient offenses in college football, speaks for itself. What concerns me is that I don't know if I am ready to embrace the spread offense just yet. Don't get me wrong , it sounds super exciting. An emphasis on being multi-faceted? A style that is predicated upon scoring early and often? Who wouldn't love that? It's just that I am a little resistant to change. It's not my fault. Years upon years of a repetitive, pro-style offense will do that to a man.

You know how their are still devout Catholics that believe that premarital sex is sinful? Every other single person is out there enjoying life and fucking anything that walks, but those religious nuts still believe, for reasons unknown, that sexual gratification before taking yourself off the market forever is wrong. When it comes to college football, I am those Catholics. Every other school is out there slanging the ball all around the yard and putting up numbers reminiscent of their basketball team, and I am just sitting convinced that running the football up the middle 65 times a game is the key to success. Chris Ash is running an Obama-esque campaign. It's time for change, and I think I am going to need some some time to get used to having a black presi....I mean, a spread offense.

Seriously though, I am a little worried, and it's not because I have any issue with the completely new direction the program is headed in. I am worried because said program finally seems to be making all the right decisions. A young, hungry Head Coach that prides himself on having an attacking defense, and an upstart coordinator that turned Houston, a school not known for it's football, into an offensive juggernaut. I couldn't be more excited for next season to start, and the Rutgers fan in me knows that's when I am at my most vulnerable. I truly believe that Rutgers just drastically changed the future trajectory of their football program in the most positive of ways, and this feeling of optimism isn't just foreign, it' downright frightening. ​

I promise this is the last post in which I will mention the man's name, but I actually feel bad for Kyle Flood. He was the only person to take a loss during the introductory press conference of Rutgers new Head Coach Chris Ash, and he wasn't even there. I have never been more enamored with a coach than I was yesterday listening to Chris Ash seamlessly maneuver through a variety of questions. I don't know if that is a product of listening to the same regurgitated bullshit week after week, but one thing is for certain. Kyle Flood makes Chris Ash look a Presidential candidate, and Chris Ash makes Kyle Flood look like a monkey throwing it's own feces. Throughout his tenure, Kyle Flood basically morphed into one of those toys whose stomach you hit that repeats a variety of pre-programmed sayings. That was all well and good when Rutgers somehow found themselves 8-5 during their first season in the Big Ten. However, much like those toys, it got old pretty fast when Rutgers was losing, and people started to realize that those saying were becoming more and more repetitive.

Chris Ash made a huge impression yesterday, because unlike his predecessor, he spoke to the Rutgers community and not at them. He sounded like a human being, and not some robot that was sent from football hell to make the lives of Rutgers fans just that. I listened to Chris Ash talk for about 30 minutes, and I already have more confidence in him than I ever had in the person he is replacing. The biggest problem with Kyle Flood was that from day one he was in over his head, and that becomes very evident when you hear Chris Ash speak. He was candid, he was sincere, he was funny, he was stern. Not only was he everything you want out of your Head Coach, but he actually sounded like a Head Coach. Obviously the real test begins when he starts to put his plan into action on the field, but he passed the preliminaries with flying colors. For the first time in a long time, I feel comfortable that the Rutgers football program is in capable hands. Capable hands that have already been instrumental in forging successful football teams. If their is a Rutgers fan out there that doesn't feel relieved hearing Chris Ash speak then I genuinely urge them to follow another University, because if your glass isn't half full now, then it may never be.

Obviously, the most important question he answered was whether or not he would coach Ohio State in their upcoming bowl game, and I, for one, am happy that he will. With college coaches constantly leaving their players in the dust to do what's best for them, it's a relief to see someone that still values loyalty. A loyalty that has been the staple of Rutgers football since the days Greg Schiano walked through the door. I have no doubts that Chris Ash will give Rutgers his all, and the reason why I want him finishing out his tenure at Ohio State is completely selfish. It's because if he were in that position here, I would want him to do the same for us. After all, a week or two of Chris Ash at 50% is basically a full year of Kyle Flood at 100%. So step off the edge and take a deep breath Rutgers fans, let the man pull double duty for a few weeks, because when bowl season ends the real fun begins, and I finally have faith that disappointment isn't looming.

I'm going to be honest. At one point, early in the process, I was hoping that Greg Schiano would be the man to take the Rutgers Head Coaching position and potentially finish what he started. Call it nostalgia. Call it an undying need to see a competent defense. Whatever it was, I felt like it made too much sense not to happen. Over the course of the last few days I realized something, the only reason I really wanted Greg Schiano back was because he was the safe choice. We knew what we would be getting with him. Great recruiting, great program builder, subpar game day coach, etc, etc. All things that sounded exponentially better than watching a half-wit feverishly scribble down with memoirs on the sidelines as it rained on his head through the hole in his visor. While there are worse things in life than playing it safe, to achieve true greatness a certain amount of risk is required.

Hiring a young, hungry, ACCOMPLISHED defensive coordinator from last year's National Champions is exactly that. A risk. A calculated risk, but a risk nonetheless. No, he has never been a Head Coach at the college level, but neither had the man I originally wanted to take the job when he took the Rutgers job so many years prior. That didn't turn out too bad, did it? I'll tell you what Chris Ash has done. He played a significant part in taking Wisconsin, a team that historically has bad quarterback play, to three straight Rose Bowls. He coached the defense of a team that managed to shock the world in going undefeated and winning a National Championship. The brilliant minds in coaching have to start somewhere, so why not have that somewhere be Piscataway, New Jersey?

Do I know if Chris Ash is a great coach? No, I don't. I know he has obviously been a successful coach. Do I know if he is a great recruiter? No, I don't. I know he has singlehandedly recruited some of the best young players in the sport to play at The Ohio State University. The man deserves his chance to shine, and Rutgers deserves a coach that can grow with this team. A coach that can institute a sense of discipline with this team. A coach that can change a culture that has proven to be flawed. A coach that won't accept the mere mediocrity his predecessor embraced. It's not a coincidence that Chris Ash had multiple offers, and it's not a coincidence he choose the one that he did. By all accounts he is an extremely driven individual that will settle for nothing less than success, and his resume speaks to exactly that. Hopefully he and Rutgers are a match made in heaven, and while it's far from the certainty, all signs seem to be pointing in the right direction.

....Plus, he was a finalist for the Syracuse job, and it ALWAYS feels nice to backdoor the Orange.

NJ.com- NJ Advance Media: Do you trust Rutgers to make the right hire?

Kautz: I had no trust for Rutgers athletics prior to Barchi's recent decisions. His decision to buy out the contract of Flood makes me trust him. Also I think Hobbs is the right man to assist in making the hire. At this point I fully trust them.

NJ Advance Media: Did you have any recruiting violations during your highly decorated NCAA Football video game career?

Kautz: In NCAA football I was never punished for recruiting violations. Take that as you may.

Kautz: I believe that my offense combines the fast pace of Chip's offense with a dominant power run system. I believe this is an offense that no one has seen before, and I believe it will excel at the highest level.

NJ Advance Media: Why are you the best candidate, especially over much more accomplished real football coaches?

Kautz: I am the best candidate for a few reasons: First off, I have never been fired from a head coaching job before. Secondly, I think my age will allow me to build a very long dynasty at Rutgers, and I will be able to relate to the players and recruits better than the other candidates. Third, look at my past coaching experience, I rarely lose. Finally, all the other coaches demand a high salary, I simply want free tuition for my last two years, and a small salary while on the job—however I am certainly open to being paid $5 million per year.

There are a lot of rumors swirling around as to who may be the next selection as Rutgers football's next Head Coach. Personally, I don't really have a preference. I just don't know enough about the candidates, other than Greg Schiano, to say that my opinion holds any water. I would say that if I had one requirement for the position it would be that the person that takes it either doesn't know Kyle Flood, or vehemently hates his guts. Give me a guy that has literally never heard the name of Kyle Flood, or a guy that spends all day and night throwing darts at a cardboard cutout of his face. Does Flood have a daughter? Has anyone ever cheated on her? I want you to hire that guy. Flood definitely got his ass kicked as a child. I want Rutgers to hire that bully. Someone dig into the past of Mrs. Flood. We need to hire her most serious ex-boyfriend. It might be a stretch, but I would even settle for a person that has committed credit card fraud against Kyle Flood. ANYONE that has done ANYTHING to cause that man even a fraction of the amount of pain that he has caused me.

If this extroverted little Jew, Ben Kautz, fits that bill then I will give him at least one half on the job before I call for his head. Can't get any worse, right? Even someone whose only experience is 'Madden' would know to put in Hayden Rettig when Chris Laviano hasn't thrown a touchdown pass in a FUCKING MONTH. Even a 19 year old college student would realize that you shouldn't be arguing with 'Dance Appreciation' professors just to make sure a player that was constantly in trouble with the law stays eligible. It doesn't take a Rhodes Scholar to figure out that you shouldn't defiantly speak on behalf of your job security after a 4-8 season in which you served a three game suspension and the entirety of your starting secondary got arrested. So yeah, relatively speaking, I do trust Ben Kautz to do a better job than Kyle Flood. I wouldn't say he's my preferred candidate, but if he doesn't start his first press conference by saying "we're just trying to go 1-0" then he's already gone a long way to gain my trust. Basically all I'm saying is that while Kyle Flood may be a nice guy, he's a goddamned idiot, and anyone that has recently been accepted by my alma mater can't possibly be as dumb he has proven to be. If that means Ben Kautz is the next Head Coach at Rutgers University then so be it. At least I have faith that he will wear a bucket hat when it rains, like a sensible grown man, instead of a visor, like a 5 year old that needs help dressing himself for the appropriate game day climate.