Goldman Sachs Would Like To Remind Noted Thespian/Former Client Of A Few Things, And Vice Versa

Earlier today actor Alan Cummings told New York magazine that he'd taken his money out of Goldman Sachs because he was disgusted with how they conducted themselves before during and after the crisis. Cummings knew writing to Lloyd Blankfein and telling the CEO how disappointed he was would accomplish nothing, and that the only way to send a message that would actually penetrate senior management was to speak their language. The language of cash-money. Cummings just knew that the way to get a rise out of LB and Co was to shake a stack of hundos in their direct line of vision and then take said hundos away from them. And Cummings was right.

Almost immediately after the news that he'd pulled his bills from GS went out, the thespian received a note from on high suggesting that a) he'd forgotten something very important b) that he ought to put a sock in it and c) that even though he'd made a silly mistake, as actors are wont to do, that Goldman is willing to take his business again, in the event he's still interested in watching Lloyd make it rain. Apparently, Cummings most certainly is not, but he is absolutely tickled by how easily the monkeys took the bait.

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A couple of hours after the NY mag piece went online I received an email from Goldman Sachs saying they had read the piece and reminding me of the amount of cash I had made whilst my money was with them, despite the financial crash. This of course just reminds me of why I moved my money in the first place. It was not so much the fact that I lost a lot of money when the financial crash happened. I did, so did a lot of people. And of course, before then and since, I made money with Goldman Sachs. But the reason I moved my money was that I felt it was the only way I could demonstrate to them that I did not approve of them, that I felt they were out of touch and indeed today they just proved that again.

Back in March, a young man named Greg Smith published an Op-Ed in the Times called "Why I Am Leaving Goldman Sachs." Greg wrote that despite joining a firm that, in the beginning, cared about "teamwork, integrity, a spirit of humility, and always doing right by clients" and not "just about making money," he'd ultimately come to be sickened by a place that, twelve years later, he couldn't even recognize. A place that, on Lloyd Blankfein and Gary Cohn's watch, had lost its way. A place that, he'd come to see, was devoid of any sort of morals, whatsoever. A place that needed to take a long hard look at what it had become. A place that, he predicted, was not long for this earth. Because unlike Smith, whose proudest moments in life-- "being selected as a Rhodes Scholar national finalist and winning a bronze medal for table tennis at the Maccabiah Games in Israel, known as the Jewish Olympics," respectively-- involved hard work and no short cuts, "Goldman Sachs today," Smith wrote, is all "about the shortcuts and not enough about achievements." Goldman Sachs 2.o, one might say, hasn't worked an honest day in its life and that didn't feel right to Smith anymore. The piece, which was said to come as shock to Goldman, did not please many people on the inside, nor did the $1.5 million deal Smith scored shortly thereafter to write Why I Left Goldman Sachs: A Wall Street Story, out October 22. Here's how Greg's publisher describes WILGS: From the shenanigans of his summer internship during the technology bubble to Las Vegas hot tubs and the excesses of the real estate boom; from the career lifeline he received from an NFL Hall of Famer during the bear market to the day Warren Buffett came to save Goldman Sachs from extinction-Smith will take the reader on his personal journey through the firm, and bring us inside the world's most powerful bank. And while higher-ups at GS may have been initially worried about the potentially damaging revelations that would appear in the book, apparently time, a slap in the face and an order to 'get it together you pustulant milquetoasts' by the ghost of Lucas van Praag has resulted in this delightfully bitchy, exceptionally underminery comment from 200 West: “Every day, some young professional, after a decade in a post-collegiate job, reassesses his or her career and decides to move on and do something else,” David Wells, a Goldman Sachs spokesman said Dealbook in an e-mailed statement. “Others can better judge whether Mr. Smith’s particular career transition is of unique interest.” Regardless of whether or not Goldman is correct in its assessment that Greg's sounds like the story dozens of analyst finishing their first year would tell of the "epic" stuff they witnessed during their 12 months of banking (+previous summer internship, during which things got pretty crazy) or if his particular career transition is indeed of unique interest, Dealbreaker will be hosting an evening of dramatic readings of select chapters, with yet-to-be secured GS alum/raconteur/boulevardier Lucas van Praag standing in for the part of Mr. Smith. Venue and ticket pricing to follow. Former Banker Promises A Peek At Goldman Sachs [Dealbook] Earlier: Resignation Letter Reveals Goldman Sachs Is In The Business Of Making Money, Hires People Who Don’t Know How To Tie Their Shoes; Jewish Ping-Pong Tournament Participant / Sixth-Year Goldman Sachs Vice President Is Looking For His Next Challenge; Goldman Sachs Accuser Greg Smith (Might Have) Lied About That Which He Holds Most Sacred