absolutely perfect i tell you

a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we only had
one stool in the house of the proper height.

i told the girl friend i'd pick up another on the way home from work...
so she measured it and told me ...24 inches.

when i got to the store *all* the stools there were 24 inches tall except
one...
which was 29 inches tall.

the 24 inchers looked so short...that i figured she must have measured
wrong...
so of course i purchased the 29 incher.

it was too tall of course
(the whole world already figured that out)

but the good news was...she was not home when i came in with it...
so i *carefully* measured it and took it down into my workshop
and with a fine bladed saw cut it down to 24 inches.

now anyone who's even read one of my posts here knows that i'm a complete
and 100% idiot who is totally incapable of doing anything correctly...
so you knew before i told you that no two legs were exactly the same length
(though i came pretty close)

as the subject says though , "absolutely perfect" !

our house is nearly 110 years old and the floor is not straight...
so when the stool was placed on it...it was perfect.
it was quite even and did not wobble in the least.

i did such a great job...that as soon as she got home i told her
all about it!

as i said, that was a few months ago...
and she seems to have finally stopped laughing

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On Or About Sun, 25 Feb 2007 13:53:48 -0600, Without Any Hesitation
Or Thinking Twice, philo Stumbled Over To The Keyboard And wrote The
Following:
> a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
> it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we only had
> one stool in the house of the proper height.
> as i said, that was a few months ago...
> and she seems to have finally stopped laughing

Thanks for the Sunday Funnies. Happens to the best of those who can
do everything. <g>
--
Just West Of Nowhere
Enjoy Life And Live It To Its Fullesthttp://.www.NuBoy-Industries.Com
2/25/2007 2:42:39 PM CST

On 2007-02-25, in 24hoursupport.helpdesk, philo waxed eloquently:
snip
>
> as i said, that was a few months ago...
> and she seems to have finally stopped laughing
>
> I've cut it off three times, and it's still too short.

--
The Old Sourdough
theoldsourdough at theoldsourdough dot com
If at first you don't succeed, the Hell with it

"philo" <> wrote in message
news:...
>a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
> it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we
> only had one stool in the house of the proper height.
>
> i told the girl friend i'd pick up another on the way home from
> work...
> so she measured it and told me ...24 inches.
>
> when i got to the store *all* the stools there were 24 inches tall
> except one...
> which was 29 inches tall.
>
> the 24 inchers looked so short...that i figured she must have measured
> wrong...
> so of course i purchased the 29 incher.
>
> it was too tall of course
> (the whole world already figured that out)
>
> but the good news was...she was not home when i came in with it...
> so i *carefully* measured it and took it down into my workshop
> and with a fine bladed saw cut it down to 24 inches.
>
> now anyone who's even read one of my posts here knows that i'm a
> complete
> and 100% idiot who is totally incapable of doing anything correctly...
> so you knew before i told you that no two legs were exactly the same
> length
> (though i came pretty close)
>
> as the subject says though , "absolutely perfect" !
>
> our house is nearly 110 years old and the floor is not straight...
> so when the stool was placed on it...it was perfect.
> it was quite even and did not wobble in the least.
>
> i did such a great job...that as soon as she got home i told her
> all about it!
>
> as i said, that was a few months ago...
> and she seems to have finally stopped laughing

How many want to venture a guess that philo decided to cut the legs at a
perpendicular to the rod rather than bevel the cuts (so they would be
flat on the floor)? The result is that only the inside edge of the legs
touch the floor (with the incumbent high pressure point). You do know
why tripods have tapered legs, right? Of course, since philo says the
floor is uneven and because the stool's legs don't telescope
independently, then the stool is stable in only one place on the uneven
old floor - unless it is a 3-leg stool instead of a 4-leg stool. With
the wrong cut angle on the leg ends and only 3 legs instead of 4, I'm
waiting for philo's longevity report when he starts asking why the legs
starting splitting at the bottom or they got loose in their joints or,
even more spectacular, is when it completely fails and he reports his
girlfriend is comatose in the hospital when she smashed her head against
the counter edge when the stool broke.

I also have to wonder in which world philo lives. Guess he hasn't a
clue that desks, tables, and other tabletops are typically around 30
inches high. So a 29-inch stool at a 30-inch countertop wouldn't have
him think about just how long are his arms when he then mounts atop that
tall stool? Maybe he was thinking of his girlfriend's cat who would sit
on the tall stool while eating out of the can on the countertop.

I can see it now. A segue on the Red Green show to the philo segment.
I'm waiting for the episode where philo notes that toothpaste can be
used to plug holes in sheetrock, and later while having tea some
toothpaste drops into their cups from the ceiling where he supposedly
plugged the holes.

"philo" <> wrote in message
news:...
> a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
> it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we only
had
> one stool in the house of the proper height.
>
> i told the girl friend i'd pick up another on the way home from work...
> so she measured it and told me ...24 inches.
>
> when i got to the store *all* the stools there were 24 inches tall except
> one...
> which was 29 inches tall.
>
> the 24 inchers looked so short...that i figured she must have measured
> wrong...
> so of course i purchased the 29 incher.
>

Thanks for all the comments folks...

BTW: there's a happy ending.

A few weeks later I picked up a great set of chairs at a 2nd hand shop
that fit at the counter perfectly. The price was too low to pass up...
and they are way better than the stools.

The stools are now in my basement workshop and will be used for unwanted
guests down there

On Or About Sun, 25 Feb 2007 16:55:18 -0600, Without Any Hesitation
Or Thinking Twice, philo Stumbled Over To The Keyboard And wrote The
Following:
> "philo" <> wrote in message
> news:...
>> a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
>> it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we only
> had
>> one stool in the house of the proper height.
>>
>> i told the girl friend i'd pick up another on the way home from work...
>> so she measured it and told me ...24 inches.
>>
>> when i got to the store *all* the stools there were 24 inches tall except
>> one...
>> which was 29 inches tall.
>>
>> the 24 inchers looked so short...that i figured she must have measured
>> wrong...
>> so of course i purchased the 29 incher.
>>
>
> Thanks for all the comments folks...
>
> BTW: there's a happy ending.
>
> A few weeks later I picked up a great set of chairs at a 2nd hand shop
> that fit at the counter perfectly. The price was too low to pass up...
> and they are way better than the stools.
>
> The stools are now in my basement workshop and will be used for unwanted
> guests down there

I thought you were going to say the stools were to short for the
counter in the basement so you glued the cut off portions of the legs
back on.
--
Just West Of Nowhere
Enjoy Life And Live It To Its Fullesthttp://.www.NuBoy-Industries.Com
2/25/2007 7:49:46 PM CST

On Or About Mon, 26 Feb 2007 14:53:17 -0600, Without Any Hesitation
Or Thinking Twice, philo Stumbled Over To The Keyboard And wrote The
Following:
>>
>> I thought you were going to say the stools were to short for the
>> counter in the basement so you glued the cut off portions of the legs
>> back on.
>
> Hey...
> maybe i'll make my workbench higher so i can glue the pieces back on the
> stool...
> don;t want to waste them you know

Guest

On Sun, 25 Feb 2007 16:55:18 -0600, "philo" <> wrote:
>
>"philo" <> wrote in message
>news:...
>> a few months ago, we got a new counter in the kitchen.
>> it was quite a bit higher than the table that it replaced...and we only
>had
>> one stool in the house of the proper height.
>>
>> i told the girl friend i'd pick up another on the way home from work...
>> so she measured it and told me ...24 inches.
>>
>> when i got to the store *all* the stools there were 24 inches tall except
>> one...
>> which was 29 inches tall.
>>
>> the 24 inchers looked so short...that i figured she must have measured
>> wrong...
>> so of course i purchased the 29 incher.
>>
>
>
>
>Thanks for all the comments folks...
>
>BTW: there's a happy ending.
>
>A few weeks later I picked up a great set of chairs at a 2nd hand shop
>that fit at the counter perfectly. The price was too low to pass up...
>and they are way better than the stools.
>
>The stools are now in my basement workshop and will be used for unwanted
>guests down there
>

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