Thing vs. Thing: Foursomes 4eva

girlfriday: So there’s this strange phenomenon in dramaland, whereby everything good comes in groups of four. Why is this? Who determined that four should be the magic number?

javabeans: I think, as with so many things, we can trace the root of the problem to Boys Before Flowers.

girlfriday: It’s a great mystery of the universe why that show spawned as many things as it did.

javabeans: Great mystery, or simple answer? (Lee Min-ho. ‘s all you need. I mean, SERIOUSLY. He can kick off any and all trends, no matter how nonsensical. Pink trousers. Corkscrew curls. Cropped-too-short pants. Bare feet and boat shoes.)

girlfriday: Um… he still has all those things, minus the curls.

javabeans: And yet, still so hot.

girlfriday: There are almost too many groupings of 4 to pick just two. Who do we have?

javabeans: F4, obviously.

girlfriday: And F44, the ajusshi version.

javabeans: Sungkyunkwan’s Joseon F4’s gotta be in the mix.

girlfriday: And then there’s the OTHER Joseon F4, with the Rooftop ducklings.

javabeans: Damn, are we tapped out already? But there are still so many 4’s left! There’s ANJELL 4, and Ramyun 4, and Triple 4.

girlfriday: Triple didn’t have three?

javabeans: Oh. I guess that makes more sense.

girlfriday: No one ever said math was our strong suit.

javabeans: But still! More 4’s! Sol Pharmacy Brothers 4, Ojakkyo 4… I do wonder, though: Why are all the ladygroups trios, then? I Need Romance, The Woman Who Still Wants To Marry, My Sweet Seoul… THE NUMBERS DON’T MATCH UP. If this were the real world, that would be a sad, sad story. Always a lonely seventh wheel.

girlfriday: It would be bad for meetings.

javabeans: Except at date-meetings, there’s always that bitch who hogs two boys, so maybe it works out after all.

girlfriday: They pre-screened the group to get rid of her?

javabeans: If only that could happen in real life.

girlfriday: You can only be my friend if you fill out this waiver for the FBI to do a background check?

javabeans: Ha, I just realized that. Although I guess you could argue that Daemul is the leader of one of those. Or we can swap out ducklings with ANJELLs, if we want to go with iconic foursomes.

girlfriday: Both can play.

javabeans: Are we doing FIVE fours? The math is going to be the end of me.

girlfriday: We can do it! It’ll work. I think.

javabeans: That’s what she said?

girlfriday: STOP THAT.

javabeans: It’s like an earworm. You just can’t get rid of the annoyingly catchy song at will, or without first infecting others.

girlfriday: But you could keep it to yourself.

javabeans: Why spare others when I could share? I’m not a noble idiot here.

girlfriday: Well you’re certainly not noble. (Snaaaaap!) Okay, so leaders… well they’re all pretty diva-esque.

javabeans: I’d argue that Daemul is the “best” leader in that (s)he inspires the others to follow, whereas Hwang Tae-kyung and Gu Jun-pyo are sorta ruling with an iron fist.

girlfriday: Though Yi Gak kinda wins in that he’s a royal, so his posse literally bows at his feet.

javabeans: He gets the easiest pass as leader given his bloodline, but the flipside of that is that he doesn’t earn it, no?

girlfriday: Yeah, he gets backlash when his minions realize that in the 21st century, they get to be on equal footing.

javabeans: And they’ll always have their minor rebellions against him, whether it’s by withholding their beer or crunching food symbolically. On the plus side, at least one of those ducklings is prepared (and trained) to give up his life for him, which I’m not sure anyone else can boast.

girlfriday: I think Daemul’s got a pretty solid bodyguard in Guhro.

javabeans: I buy that he’d risk his safety to save her. I’m not convinced he’d give up his life entirely, though. But Guhro totally wins in the broodiest sidekick category.

girlfriday: Probably. But who’s his competition?

javabeans: Um… rapping gangster chaebol boy?

girlfriday: Or Jung Yong-hwa? I think Kim Min-jong is headed that way.

javabeans: No, not Kim Min-jong! *Sadface*

girlfriday: I know! I have so much involuntary love for any character he plays. It’s such a holdover from the 90s. There’s gotta be a clinical term for that. 90s Idol Hangover?

javabeans: Drama Association Beer Goggles?

girlfriday: The Transitive Property of Drama Hero-dom?

javabeans: As things stand now, though, Guhro’s probably the most thwarted in love, stepping aside so his leader can have the girl instead. Although he didn’t sing her a tearful song, Jeremy-style. I guess Shi-woo hyung might count, but to be honest, I’m not sure he could emote anything, so I put Jeremy ahead of him on the pain scale.

girlfriday: I luff Jeremy. So squishable.

javabeans: He really did give that character added oomph. And yes, *squish.* Guhro did get a bromance out of the deal, though, so you can’t feel too sorry for him.

girlfriday: And not just a consolation bromance, but an epic bromance to end all bromances.

javabeans: Which bromance was more epic, though—that one, or the fanfic slash three-way between the ANJELL boys?

javabeans: True, Sungkyunkwan’s real-life slashfic way outnumbers ANJELL’s fictional slashfic. The math wins in this one. I wonder if Yi Gak had the best posse, in that none of his boys challenged him for the girl, but were busy little Cupids instead. I suppose F3 were supportive, too, but you can’t really beat matching tracksuits or couple (quartet) tees, can you?

girlfriday: F4 had a quartet of sports cars? Yeah, I dunno.

javabeans: Maybe that’s the rich people version of male bonding. Driving, skiing, shooting, and kayaking together. This is how we support our leader, by having matching cars and boats and helicopters. OH WAIT, JI-HOO. He totally challenged Jun-pyo for the girl. It was a whole thing!

girlfriday: OH. I forgot all about him!

javabeans: I was like, I know there’s a fourth guy, but who was he?

girlfriday: So maybe he wins for most broody unrequited whatchamacallit.

javabeans: He did have pancakes of sadness and other tragic foodstuffs.

girlfriday: And sad hair. Or… was that just regular hair?

javabeans: You can never tell with idols. He had a violin, though. Those are sad, right?

girlfriday: They are when you play them in the snow.

javabeans: And they cut your fingers, mirroring the cutting of your heart.

girlfriday: Pffft. Well then I’m back on Team Guhro, ‘cause he got cut with SWORDS.

javabeans: That was never any contest. Guhro could cut you with his stare.

girlfriday: Rawr.

javabeans: Although if we go back to the whole hair thing… Guhro, mebbe not so much. Does Jun-pyo win for rocking a hairstyle that has no business being rocked, or does Hwang Tae-kyung win for the sheer crazy?

girlfriday: Hair Award goes to Hwang Tae-kyung, hands down.

javabeans: Also, the guyliner award.

girlfriday: Very important. He probably also wins the skinny jeans award, though Yi Gak pulls in quite a showing.

javabeans: Who put up with the most humiliation for the girl, you think? Jan-di sure put Jun-pyo through the wringer, but Yi Gak had Troll hair and acid washed jeans. Still, I’m not sure you can top vomit in mouth.

girlfriday: Yup. Winner. Or… Loser. Each foursome always has a playboy, right? Er, more of a playboy than the others?

javabeans: Lessee, there’s Kim Bum with the saxophone of all cringiness. And Yeo-rim the fashion designer, though he seemed way more cuddly with his bro than with any ladies.

girlfriday: There’s the eunuch playboy Chi-san. Still don’t get.

javabeans: Yeah me neither.

girlfriday: There’s Lee Jong-hyuk, the married playboy. He wins for Biggest Cad.

javabeans: When marriage enters the equation, you stop being a playboy and just turn into an ass. And on the flipside of that, it makes eunuch boy the most harmless playboy.

girlfriday: What about on the friendship scale? F44’s gotta win ‘cause they’ve been friends for twenty-two years. Though… with the time-travelers, have they been friends for three hundred years?

javabeans: I think you have to be conscious for that time to count, so F44 wins. Hwang Tae-kyung seems to have a distant relationship with his ANJELL boys, so he’s on the bottom end of the friendship meter.

girlfriday: I’m trying to figure out what F4 has in common except being filthy rich.

javabeans: F4 have been friends for the greatest percentage of their lives, though, meaning they have shaped each other more than F44, who met as adults, right?

girlfriday: More or less. They met at 18.

javabeans: Whereas F4 have been together since kindergarten and spent their formative years together. Although… I’m not sure that’s a good thing, actually. Can’t you imagine them all being so fixed in their roles that they go to college and are the new jjangs, and then fearfully look over their shoulders half-expecting Jun-pyo to be there with his tyrant’s orders? Compared to, say, the Sungkyunkwan 4, who meet young enough to grow into their ideals together, but have distinct roles outside the group. You know, like avenging and fashion designing.

girlfriday: Ha. I do agree that Joseon 4 has the best grouping of distinct personalities. They have the best new friendship, and F44 has the best old friendship.

javabeans: Do you not love how in this very small sampling of an entirely unrelated topic, we have TWO cross-dressing heroines in disguise cohabitating with their future boyfriends?

girlfriday: Hahaha. So then we have to throw that into the competition too! Which foursome has the best non-boy?

javabeans: Both heroines are doing it to help out their family, so nobility scale is even. On the idiot half, however… One’s a smarty-smart scholar, and the other one glues her fingers together. What adult woman does that?

girlfriday: The kind that vomits in other people’s mouths?

javabeans: Ha. But Mi-nyeo (I just can’t call her Mi-nam, when she’s not a nam and not her brother!) helps her man deal with a crippling condition. Sun-joon needs no such help.

girlfriday: But Tae-kyung finds out right away that Mi-nyeo is a girl, whereas Sun-joon actually accepts the fact that he loves Yoon-hee even if that means he’s gay. Winner!

javabeans: Tae-kyung never really got the chance to test that, so I can’t hold it against him. If Sun-joon were faster on the uptake, he wouldn’t have HAD to face that question.

girlfriday: That’s true. He is quite dim in that respect.

javabeans: Tae-kyung wins for thoughtful gifts. He made her a Pig-Rabbit! And spent a hundred bucks on a plastic hairclip! He wins 100 points out of 10!

girlfriday: Haha, I forgot about his crazy scale and point system. Yes, he does win for best gifty, though it’s his own damn fault for spending that much.

javabeans: Maybe he thought it was 100 bucks out of 10.

girlfriday: He does math like us.

javabeans: Wait, if we’re no longer just restricting the conversation to ladies in drag, do we have to include Jun-pyo’s outlandish gifts into this equation? He bought Jan-di clothes and jewels and a one-of-a-kind necklace and a freaking private plane ride to New Caledonia and I think also Macau… If he’d had his way he would’ve bought her the world, or as much of it as he could afford. Stupid and misguided, but kind of incredibly sweet too.

girlfriday: Urg, rich boys. Then I guess Yi Gak and his black card, rooftop-room-remodeling self is some fierce competition too.

javabeans: Ohhh, right. He bought her a penthouse and a juice store too. C’mon Sun-joon, what’s with your lack of gifting? Or in this scenario, does that actually speak well of him?

girlfriday: Did he not get her anything? That can’t be true.

javabeans: Maybe… a pile of books or something?

girlfriday: Oh, he wrote her those adorable love notes tucked in books. Just what a brainy girl would want.

javabeans: Who wins, star-moon necklace, or star-moon metaphor? One got lost a lot, and the other got beat into our heads a lot.

girlfriday: They cancel each other out.

javabeans: I’ll give it to the ajusshis for being the snazziest dressers. Those sharp suits!

girlfriday: Right? So. Much. Eye. Candy. The only other foursome with decent clothes is Sungkyunkwan, just ‘cause period costumes keep them from veering into fashion WTFery.

javabeans: Yeo-rim did have his flowery fans and luxury silk hanboks, but at least they were still beautiful clothes. A far cry from ripped Flashdance sweaters, saggy-crotched pants of doom, recycling-bin castoffs, or ascots and brocade waistcoats on a 19-year-old. There are just some things that get better with age.

girlfriday: So… which foursome wins the cagematch?

javabeans: The only way to find out is to lock them all in the cage and make them fight it out. Maybe in Jell-o.

June 5, 2012 at 8:30 PM

F4 started it all but its only Minho that I really like out of the four. The other characters were forgettable.

The best for me is Sungkyunkwan Scandal, the Joseon 4. You will love each character and they all matter in the story.

Next one for me is Rooftop Prince. Yoo Chun is soooo adorably sexy there with his skinny jeans and the smiles. The other three were so cute!!!

I am beginning to love F44. Its Jang Dong Gun, I think no explanation is needed. Plus you have Min Jong, Suro and Jong Hyuk. C'mon they are HOT! Except for Suro I guess since I will always remember his antics in Family Outing that I can't take him seriously.

June 6, 2012 at 11:43 AM

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Actually, can someone explain to me why Jang Dong Gun is supposed to be so cool? This is the first show I have seen him in, and I am just not getting it (and it isn't an age thing, I am still a decade older than him). As far as I can see, he is just an egotistical jerk with bad hair and more wrinkles than I have. Is it just because his character is so detestable? Does he actually play someone nice or someone cool, at some point? All he does here is yank this one poor woman's chain while shacking up with another woman. Is he a nice person off-screen, or something?

June 4, 2012 at 3:32 PM

June 4, 2012 at 5:39 AM

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Ahahah!! OMG! I love you guys. This made me laugh so hard. I think if I have to pick a favourite foursome out of the equation... If I REALLY must... Sungkyunkwan wins... Sorry, nothing beats sidekicks with sword and a cheerful one xD

June 4, 2012 at 3:50 PM

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I'd go with the Joseon Power Rangers (er, Ducklings) if I were to pick out of the kdrama lot. But if I have to choose the F4 of F4s that started it for me, then I am with you on the Japanese F4. Hahahaha.

June 4, 2012 at 2:55 PM

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Good point! IMHO, I think the F4 in Coffee Prince would have to include Eun Chan but not Han Kyul. And they are the most adorable F4, to me. I love their friendship and conern for each other, and the bickering is so cute!

June 4, 2012 at 5:53 AM

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Fav from all the 4s? Jeremy, Guhro, with the leaders taken out of the equation. The leaders have so much build-up its not fair to include them, but Guhro and Jeremy really were there for their girl. Oh and so cute *squish*

June 4, 2012 at 6:33 AM

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It's probably not fair for me to judge, since I've only seen half of these series (SKKS and You're Beautiful), but if I had to choose, then it would definitely be our Joseon scholars from SKK. I was always under the impression that this group didn't really have a leader and they all four kind of brought their group together in their own way. Of course, I guess Yoon-hee DID play a pretty big role in actually BRINGING them all together initially. But none of them actually ruled over any of the other three (if that makes any sense.) They kind of all did their own thing and fell in step with each other all too naturally.

June 4, 2012 at 7:21 AM

June 4, 2012 at 7:12 AM

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Hahahaha, how timely that I've been wondering lately if the F4 is to be recast with our current crop of youthful hotties! Actually, scrap the entire BOF cast entirely and start all over again. And you decide to post this article about the flower quartet, what a coincidence...

Since I'm at it, lemme ask you guys if we got the chance to cast them all over again, who would be your ideal ep-ppeu-po (F4)?^^

June 4, 2012 at 7:24 AM

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so I just realized I've watched all of the dramas above, which means I probably have a thing for quartets...lol...
such a great thing vs. thing post and I'm impressed at your ability to remember so much details from each of the dramas. :)

June 4, 2012 at 5:17 PM

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What Sun Joon gave her was the push to do something good with her smarts and to make her stop feeling as if her social status prevented her from achieving anything. He could have had her arrested for assisting in cheating in the beginning, but he saw something in her and steered her towards the school. He could have let her quit the archery tournament when she wanted to quit, but he kept telling her she could do it and gave her that "miracle" to believe in. I think those were bigger gifts than anything tangible.

June 4, 2012 at 8:14 AM

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Definitely SKKS's Joseon 4. That drama put me on to the power that is Yoo Ah In.
Meanwhile, it's ripple effect on my life has been un-measurably damaging. Two words, "king" and "fashion."
I give you permission to put them together in whatever order you want to, because I can no longer be bothered to care about those miserable months of 2012.
I'm piecing my drama life back together slowly but I'll never be the same. Let this be a lesson to you all. One GOOD drama can lead to ruin down the line.

June 4, 2012 at 7:17 PM

June 4, 2012 at 8:16 AM

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While I love my SKKS boys, there can only be one true winner for me and that's my BoF guys. I mean you truly had different dudes for different moods. You had the rich and spoiled, rich and playboy, rich and sweetheart, and rich and ride a die. I mean hey as long as everyone is rich plus good-looking hehe ^.^

I love the fact that Mickey Yoochun has been in two foursomes( hehe, my mind went elsewhere for a second) and there has been two Lee Min Hos as well.

June 4, 2012 at 12:55 PM

June 4, 2012 at 8:23 AM

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This is really hard for me.. I fall for LMH becoz of Gu Jun Pyo ..then came along JGS in the eccentricity of Hwang Tae Kyung, first fangirlism for PYC for his smarty nerdy Lee Sun Joon, made worse for Royal Highness YiGak...
Gah, what a timeline of trendies!!!!
Still, got to give first award to Chunnie... Adorable Chunnie..
If I had to make a bucket list, meeting Chunnie in person wud be the first in the list....

June 4, 2012 at 8:25 AM

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WOW WOW - this post is AWESOME and so hilarious. Me thinks that the F44 is just so slick and smooth and on matured and more realistic relationships in the 21st century which me likes very much. Way better, in my opinion than F4 BOF, which to be honest is more for the "younger generation"! (boy i am going to get some fleck for this!).

I loved the SKKS quartet a lot too - i agree that there is no real leader in this group but a coming together of four individuals with very specific ideas of what life is and how to, if possible, change that life i.e. make it better for all, both men and women.

June 4, 2012 at 1:08 PM

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Let's face it secret girl has the alpha and beta males from her foursome in love with her, so really that only leaves one truly free guy for the team of girls.

On the other hand, the Team Girl usually has a sexually forward female in the mix so she has probably dated the guys on the team already anyway. Let's assume she's super cool, nonchalant and just along for the laughs.

On the third hand (yes, I have 3 hands, I dunno about you guys) the beta male is gonna be a super attractive pile of putty out for a rebound so he will be perfect for the sexually prudish 3rd female on the team. That equation is gonna equal out perfectly. three couples and a sexy/cool single female (seventh wheel).

June 4, 2012 at 8:35 AM

June 4, 2012 at 8:37 AM

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HAHAHA! Javabeans and GirlFriday = Priceless!

The two of you are better and more than 4, 44, 84 or any combination thereof.

Great, great article! Thanks

Actually, I thought of a future '4' drama, where the F84's in a modern day senior care facility time-travel back to Joseon and become F24's. They like being young, but they also miss the conveniences of modern day. So, they keep popping back to the present and bringing 'stuff' back to the past.

With this drama, we'll get 2 sets of 4's. One set of 24 and one of 84. (That makes 8, right????)