I don’t think I would be doing nearly as well had I not been working on a more body positive mindset.

Five years ago, if this happened, I think I would have been nearly paralyzed with fear about what would happen to my bodyweight. Today, yes; I am still somewhat scared about that. I know I’m not “supposed” to be, but I’m also not here to lie to you ;). However, today, that fear is not driving my decisions and actions.

Some people have told me they are impressed with how I am quickly looking to find alternative ways to move. And the reason I feel this drive to do so, is because I’m highly invested in keeping my body feeling like a nice place to live. I know that continuing to move will help with that. I also know that if I don’t take a break from heavy lifting now, I may be forced to take a break later, with a lot more pain and/or loss of function (and that will mean that my body will definitely NOT feel like a nice place to live).

I also know from experience that I tend to hate being outside in the heat, and I tend to move less in the summer. So, getting into the pool more will probably help with that.

I do notice some old thoughts creeping in. For example, I had some mental resistance to trying lunges and other alternative strengthening exercises to barbells. Yoga too. These exercises remind me of the days when I was working out to change how my body looked. I’m acknowledging that resistance….and I know that if I want to keep myself feeling well, I may have to get over that association and try them again now.

Bottom line is – I am very grateful to have been working towards loving my body more. That doesn’t mean I always love the way it looks, although I am having more days like that than I used to. More importantly, it means I love myself enough to give myself what I need to feel well TODAY, even when things aren’t going my way. I love myself enough to give my body the break it needs, rather than operating out of fear about what will happen if I take that break.

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