The official blog for missing Utah mom Susan Cox Powell.

Florida Service in Susan’s Name

A sweet and kind Florida woman—someone who never met Susan but has proven a true friend to her these past months since she’s disappeared—has done many kind acts during her life, most recently in Susan’s name, despite going through personal tragedy of her own during this time.

In Linda’s words:

March 24: Donation made today in the name of the Susan Cox Powell Foundation for 50+ beanie babies. Donation given to the traffic division of Lauderhill, FL police department. This is our 2nd donation. The first was to the Coral Springs, FL police department. They were very gracious:

Linda suggests that people everywhere can donate beanie babies to their police departments. She says, “We have been doing this for years… Before beanie babies we made hug-a-bears….this might be a good project for the teenagers so they can get their community service hours for college applications.”

Thank you, Linda, for your kind and thoughtful service in Susan’s name! And huge thanks to the Lauderhill, Florida Police Department for their service to those in need.

One Response

Josh stays home from Church again. His attendance had waned ever since their financial troubles a few years ago. He was obsessed with control and cooked up a dehumanizing idea to drug his wife with some sort of “date-rape” concoction. Things have gone cold in the bedroom and he sees this as an option to satisfy his carnal desires. She would never participate in the things he spent hours viewing in private. His addiction to pornography had warped his mind. Only he knew how dark he had become. It was easier than he thought to mix a few household ingredients together to create a sedative he could give her. He had found several recipes on the internet and even a video with instructions to make GHB. He made the poison and hid it in the kitchen.

After his boys and Susan got home he had already started preparing a simple dinner of pancakes and eggs. He wasn’t the guy that normally made a family dinner, but Susan would see this as a kind gesture. This wasn’t an act of kindness as Susan viewed it. Instead, this was a meal that would deliver his key to complete control over her body. Almost sabotaging the plan, Susan invited a neighbor over to help with crocheting and to keep the household conversation even keeled. She knew that when it was just her and Josh conversations easily boiled into arguments stemming from their frigid love life. Not even their smiles and normalcy could break the skin of his lurid plan to chemically take advantage of Susan. The monster in side him was in control now.

His conscience had been paralyzed. He fed the children in the kitchen, but Susan was in the living room with her friend. He had to check on her periodically to make sure his plan was working. As the conversation waned, the otherwise cheerful and vibrant Susan began to get nauseous. She was experiencing an ache in her head as her body was violently rejecting Josh’s homemade drug. Soon after Susan goes to lay down, the friend leaves, and Josh tells them he is going to leave the house with the boys to go sledding. He wants to return to wife that is in a deep sleep, put the boys in bed, and then act out his fantasies on her. Instead, Josh returns after about an hour and sees something else. She is on the floor in a pool of vomit having a severe reaction to his potion. He sees her laying on the floor and panics. Josh quickly turns her over and lifts her onto the bed. He puts the kids in their bedroom with some toys, and rushes to clean up the vomit with towels and a bucket of water. He says her name several times and knows she is unconscious. Aside from the vomit his plan was still on working. He didn’t plan on her getting sick. Maybe he gave her too much. Josh get’s the two fans out of the garage storage and aims them at the wet carpet in the bedroom. He leaves her on the bed, turns out the lights, then goes into the boys room to put them in bed. Soon later he reenters his bedroom and sees that Susan has not moved. He feels that her skin is getting cold. Josh didn’t know what to do. Should he panic? Would she just sleep it off?Should he get her help? He had only read about this. He checks her pulse and sees her breathing is faint. She is getting worse.

His human instincts were to call 911. He wants to get help, but how would he explain that he drugged her for carnal gratification? He would certainly be arrested. How would he explain it to her? She would leave him he just like she had threatened before. A total loss of his control. He sits there holding his phone, wondering if he should call for help.

He couldn’t do it. He wraps her vomit covered body up in the comforter. It was getting close to midnight. He dressed himself in warm clothes and carried her lifeless body out to the van in the driveway. He laid her down on the floor, slid the van door shut, looked around the quiet neighborhood to see if anyone was looking. Josh went back into the house to prepare to leave the city. He would have to figure out what he’d tell people later. For now he had to focus on hiding his secret.

Josh turned the lights off in the house, then carried the two sleeping children into their van seats. The boys were the only ones that loved him no matter what. He locked the door of the house, checked it by shaking the handle, then walked down the cold dark walkway to the van. Where will he go? Where can he run to? As he drives out of his neighborhood he stops at the intersection. he wonders if he should head east and take her to get medical attention or should he head west to a lonely tundra where his secret would be safe? He changes the direction on his blinker and heads west towards a location “south” of here. He’s looking at his boys sleeping in the back seats and wondering how to fix the situation. It’s at this point he knows that everything good he ever had is gone. His mind drifted as he no longer saw Susan as a stranger in his own home, but as the woman who has taken care of him. He has to get focused on what he was going to do. It’s now well after midnight and he’s wondering if he should flee out-of-State with the boys, turn around and try and get her help, or try and just hide the body. He can see the moonlit mountains in the distance and decides that he’ll hide the body in a remote area near an old camping spot. Maybe he’ll change his mind, but for now he needs to get her out of the car so that he can think. He heads to the remote area and stops the car, he leaves the car running with the boys and Susan’s body. He wanders around trying to find a place to hide her amongst the rocks. After a few minutes he comes back, checks on the sleeping boys, removes her wrapped body, and carries her to the hiding spot.

The walk from the van to the place he would hide her was the difficult for Josh. Carrying her was strenuous to his weak back, but even more strenuous was the guilt he had been carrying for years. The lies, deception, verbal abuse, and control. He had abused her and now he could never apologize. He left her there in the cold, face up. The ground was too frozen and he didn’t have anything to bury her with. He placed her next to a rock and covered her with brush. He would come and bury her later after he figured out an alibi. It was frigid outside. Josh could hear the hum of the van motor in the the distance and walked back to check on his boys. He couldn’t look back. He had to lie to himself about what he had just done.

The car was warm and the boys were still asleep. They would never know that they were there when this monster left their mother alone in the cold. His fuel talk was getting low and he headed to the nearest town. It was getting close to dawn and he knew the kids would want to eat. Work would be calling? What would he say? He was tired and delirious. All he could think of was camping. He had nothing else he could say. Why was he in the desert? He feeds the kids and contemplates what his next move will be. He turns off his phone and then heads back to the area where he left Susan and waits, thinking about his next move. He decides that if he doesn’t head home the neighbors will start looking for him. He gets the kids out of the car and lets them play there in the desert. Should he run or should he return? He calls his neighbor who was there the night before to get a sense for what is going on at home. She tells him the police were at the house and everyone is worried that you were all dead. Josh assures her that he is fine and that he took the boys camping. He has no other choice now than to go home. After he arrives he and finds neighbors and police have already been there and entered the home he had carefully locked earlier. They tell him why they broke in and he knows they don’t know. But where is Susan? He never had a chance to create an alibi. He only had time to explain where he was.