Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Mystery stil surrounds the enigma of how Alaska's Senator Ted Stevens became the Corrupt Bastards Club official Godfather despite a rash of news coverage in the US this week focusing on "an embittered psychopath w...

CONSTITUTION, SC - Otherwise known as "Cigarette City" by its locals because of the city's ban on non-smokers in its restaurants and bars, Constitution, SC has become a haven for free-thinkers and constitutionalists from across the coun...

(MUSICMAN PRESS) Pop icon and celebrity Paris Whitney Hilton 20, was released from prison yesterday on the grounds that she had an unmentioned medical complication that prohibited her from serving the remainder of her sentence, of forty-five days. Hi...

Judges have been given the go ahead to give defendents receiving more than 100 hours of community service the option of being shipped to Iraq to complete their sentence. Other charges and fines may also be dropped or greatly reduced.

Based on a new National Audubon Society study, twenty of the most common North American birds, such as the field sparrow, snow bunting, meadowlark, Northern bobwhite, and whippoorwill, are drastically dead.

With various organisations and nations setting goals for reducing their carbon footprint over a period of years or even decades, Google is getting stuck in with a plan to achieve carbon neutrality in six months...

Ericsson and Indian cellular network operator, Idea Cellular, have built four cellular base stations powered by generators running off 'biodiesel', fuel locally produced from old cooking oil from chip shops.

Apple would be well justified in anticipating a successful iPhone launch based on new survey. According to Seattle-based mobiles market analyst firm M:Metrics, as many as 19 Americans would be interested in owning an iPhone.

It was announced today by the "insanely successful"(c) American based software company, Conngianulated Software(tm) or as it's more popularly known ConnSoft(tm) had finally decided on a name for it's next version of its "non monopolistic and open source" (tm) operating system...

Today, it was announced that deputy PM and happy shopper lard spokesman John Prescott was named "World's Fattest Northerner", beating Cyril Smith, Chubby Brown and a capsized blue whale found near Barnsley.

Miami - (Rioters): The Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino room where ill-fated Playboy centerfold Anna Nicole Smith met her untimely death in February this year may have been hexed by a shaman according to new evidence.

Rome - (Rotters): Tomb of Jesus documentary maker James Cameron has been commissioned to film excavations for the Holy Grail - the wine goblet allegedly used by Jesus at the Last Supper - which an Italian archaeologist claims is buried under the 6th...

San Francisco - In a mixed decision a Federal court decided yesterday that a person can have the same rights as a corporation, setting up likely conflicts for years to come. The ruling "attempts to right the imbalance of power c...

(Crappers) New federal law now sign by the president makes attempted purchases with declined cards a felony. Now, shopping at any store and pay with worthless plastic cards, or rubber checks will bring out the store security. Arrests will be made and...

A research team at Purdue University has developed a 3D simulation of the September 11 attacks on the World Trade Center. Their research is a culmination of a 2 1/2 year study into the attacks with the hope of aiding engineers in the design of safer...

Santosh-nagar (Bum-Bay): After years of research and much hard work, the Indian AIDS (Acquired Intestinal Disorder Syndrome) Ass-ociation (IAA) has approved a much widely used "medicine" as the cure for AIDS.

(New York) - The major 24-hour cable TV news networks have bowed to public pressure to stop reporting unimportant, non-national news stories. According to viewers, just because there is a picture or a video of an event, or a reporter nearby, doesn...

The Sacramento Kings have been in existence in Sacramento for only 23 seasons. Reggie Theus was announced today as their 21st head coach. Considering that one coach led the team for eight seasons, longevity is not sure thing for this club.

Herman Munster is the latest victim of identity theft. His social security number, mastercard number, and birthdate were all used by an overseas company to illegally purchase computer and entertainment supplies. Then, all of their bank accounts wer...

Adam "Pacman" Jones of the Tennessee Titans football team of the NFL is in trouble (again). Jones is accused of biting a bar bouncer on the ankle during a fight and shooting in February. He faces two felony counts for the incident.