Sunday, March 3, 2013

I’ve never considered myself to be a social person. Until the age of 11, I
couldn’t order from the cashier at McDonald’s because I was so afraid. As time
went on I could talk to adults, but I was never able to easily communicate with
my peers. It made me uncomfortable and anxious. The words always came out
wrong. I wasn’t afraid of embarrassing myself, or that people would judge me,
it was just that I couldn’t talk.

You’d think I’d be past this at 17 years of age, but I’m not. I went back to
counseling this Spring. I go every other week because I have Social Anxiety.
Being in crowds can give me panic attacks or make me sick if I feel
uncomfortable enough. But I don’t want to be that way, so I choose not to be.

Joining Theta was something I hadn’t anticipated – ever. Sororities “weren’t
my scene”. Heaven forbid I would have to…speak to people. I didn’t go through formal
recruitment. But when I saw how happy my roommate was in her sorority, I
questioned why it would be so awful for me to join. I mentioned my regrets to a
girl on the hall, and she asked me if I wanted to try for KAT. I hadn’t heard
too much talk about it before, but I had an instant gut feeling. This was my challenge.
This was something good. I went through the interview, and now I’m here.

For most people, joining a sorority isn’t such a challenge. But for me to
speak to girls I’ve never met on a constant basis is hard. When my mom found out I had
gotten in she was so excited because she knew that it took a lot of effort on
my part. And it did. I am so proud and happy that I took that step for myself.
But now the real challenge begins: making friends out of my sisters.

I’ve been to Coffee with KAT four times now and I am also in the Sisterhood
Committee. There are days where I stay silent and just listen, and there are days when
I speak up as much as possible. The first day I went to coffee I just sat there
because I was so afraid. Someone asked me my name and all eyes turned towards
me. I didn’t want to go back. But my counselor and I talked about going again.
She told me to sit up straight, act confident, and speak loudly. I tried going
again and it worked! I’m making friends and doing so much better.

The reason that I’m quiet sometimes is certainly not because I don’t like
any other Thetas. I love my sisters to death. It’s just that it’s hard some
days. Tonight we learned about being a leader during New Member Meeting. And so
I just ask that all of you leaders out there talk to a sister who isn’t
speaking up. Ask her what she thinks, because she’s thinking a lot. She’ll
appreciate that you are pushing her to be better, as well as inviting her to be
your friend. Remember that it’s the little things that can make a huge difference
in someone’s life.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Being the First

As the
oldest child in my family, “being the first” came with each new activity I
participated in. Growing up I was never excited to “be the first”—the first to
go to school, the first to get braces, the first to take the SAT. I was always
a bit envious of my younger siblings who would figure out the best way to do
things based on my actions, triumphs, and mistakes. I wanted just one time for someone
to make those mistakes before me, so that I, too, could learn from them—what the
best classes were to take, clubs to join, which colleges to visit, when to take
the SATs, and how to maneuver through the college application process.

Now, however,
for the first time, I am truly happy to “be the first”, to be a charter member
of Kappa Alpha Theta at Wake Forest University. Perhaps it is because I am not
in this venture alone, but I am walking alongside 150+ wonderful women, all of
whom I am extremely proud not only to call my friends and classmates, but also
my sisters. It is truly a unique opportunity that we have to establish
something at Wake Forest University that will far outlast our short time spent
wandering the Quad, studying in the library, or laughing with friends at the
Pit.

Under the
guidance and leadership of our two wonderful, caring, and enthusiastic ELCs, I
am excited to see what the first group of Kappa Alpha Thetas will accomplish
over the course of the semester. What name will we create for ourselves? What
traditions will we establish? Who will we be able to help through our service
and philanthropic events? By holding true to the values of Bettie Locke
Hamilton, we can create an organization that continues to be supportive of the
leadership, academic, and social pursuits of all members, while providing a
family away from home. I hope that over the course of the semester, we will be
able to continue to lay the foundation of a strong sisterhood, one that is
built by genuine concern and support of others.

We are the first! Wow, that is a
big responsibility and can seem overwhelming at times, but we must think back
to our founders. The four original Thetas--Betty Locke Hamilton, Alice Allen
Brant, Bettie Tipton Lindsey, and Hannah Fitch Shaw--all of whom helped to
create the first Greek letter fraternity for women. They fought to create a
group in which they could find support within a male dominated campus and
world. They were the first and their challenge was far greater than ours.

I challenge
each and every one of you, sisters, to find courage and confidence in the
actions of those four women, for they created an organization that has far
outlasted any of their wildest dreams and has inducted women who have made a
difference not only on their college campuses, but in the world at large. I
wish good luck to each of you! And please remember, you are never in this
alone. You will never have to take the first step without knowing that 150+ of
your sisters step alongside you! So, perhaps “being the first” isn’t so bad
after all!