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August 15, 2010

One Hit Wonders of the 90s (Part 27)

Hello, dear reader. I have a favour to ask you. The original post begins after all of the asterisks, if you want to skip this.

Now that the One Hit Wonders of the 90s series is over, I'm not going to be doing my weekly revisiting of all these posts (I had to do that to add the new post to the bottom). Thus, I won't be able to catch any broken picture links or deleted videos any more. Yet I want these posts to be as good as possible.

Please, if you happen upon one of these posts, or if you take a walk through a whole bunch of them, let me know if you find anything that doesn't work. You can leave a comment, or you can send me a message using that handy "Contact Me" page linked above.

Also, feel free to let me know what you think of the post or any of the videos!

Thank you.

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It's Sunday! And you know what that means. No, it's not time to retire this really lame joke that I've used way too many times before. Though I really should, you know. Give it a retirement party and everything.

I know! I'll call all of its friends, making sure I include those joke emails that have been sent around again and again and again until everybody in the world except somebody living in remote Indonesia has seen them. But I'm not going to call the knock-knock jokes. We have standards, and I don't care whether this joke wants them there. I'm just not going to do it. It can call them itself if it really wants them there.

But there will be cake.

Where was I?

Oh yeah! It's time for this week's edition of the weekly One-Hit Wonders of the 90s! That mainstay of your Sunday morning (or afternoon, considering the only fans of this one who read it on the day it's posted are out East). That bedrock in your life. More dependable than your loving husband or wife! (But it doesn't do windows or gutters). The show that has lasted longer than some TV series, faithfully showing up week after week like a druggie that needs his hit.

Is this where I tell you I'm going to miss a week in September? Well.....maybe not. We'll see.

(this picture has been posted by the Society of "GET TO THE F-ING POINT!")

So sit back and enjoy the last of 1996. We're getting into the home stretch now! Hold on to your hats, because it's gonna be a doozy! (Disclaimer: Said doozy may or may not happen, as the creator of this blog has not actually listened ahead, and thus no guarantee of a "doozy" is actually implied or inferred (or whatever the hell word you use) and thus, the blogger reserves the right to be a loser (not that this is anything different than usual, and why am I using so many parentheses?) and be wrong)

There, now that we've got the legalese out of the way, you can find the list here. And I'm not even going to bother threatening you if you go look ahead. It's not like you listen anyway...

Here we go!
1) Dishwalla: "Counting Blue Cars" (#15)

"Tell me all your thoughts on God?" Well, I'll bet He doesn't drive a blue car! He has more taste than that (not to mention that old "omnipotent" thing, which means He not only doesn't need to own a car, but He probably wouldn't sink so low as to own one.

Oh, and of course they then throw that "God is a Woman!" thing. Ok, whatever.

I remember kind of liking this song back in 1996. It's nothing special, and it's not one I would sing in the car if it came on the radio, but I don't dislike it or anything.

I save that for the *really* bad things, like Satan.

Or Erectile Dysfunction commercials.

2) Donna Lewis: "I Love You Always Forever" (#2)

I had no idea Lewis was Welsh! Now that I know, I can kind of hear the accent.

And I'm immensely turned on.

Ahem, sorry.

Anyway, this was a huge hit in 1996, and I think it's still relatively popular today. I think for the video they decided to spend all of their money on camera angles instead of actual, you know, sets and stuff. They didn't even need to buy clothes! "Ah, just wear what you slept in, Donna," I'm sure the director said.

That being said, the look just adds to her sexiness...

Ahem!!!! Sorry again.

Anyway, I do like this song. It's kind of a pick-me-up, isn't it? Between her voice, her looks, and just the general nature of the song, it's really hard to resist, isn't it? Thankfully, she didn't have any stiff competition at that point of the year.

Wow, this is the longest song title I've seen since The Journeymen of Russia put out their #1 hit, "I've Got the Borscht Blues Because My Wife Left Me and Now I Just Have This Guitar to Remember Her By" (It was a major success...in Derbent, Russia).

This song hit #2, less than a month after Donna Lewis did, and I have no memories of this song whatsoever. This is so weird. Of course, this is the month I "met" my wife online, so maybe I was distracted.

The comments section on this video talks about how awesome this song is, making it sound so profound and everything. Me? I kind of like the beat and music, but the song itself really doesn't do anything for me.

I guess this means I'll have to burn my blue "Overrated Philosophers of Music" membership card, but I don't care! I stand by my principles.

Though I will miss the cheese dip at the weekly meetings.

4) Garbage: "Stupid Girl" (#24)

Oh, I've been waiting for this one since I saw it on the list.

I had never heard of Garbage until meeting my wife, who loved the band. She introduced me to the music, and now I love almost every song of theirs that I hear. While this was their only "mainstream" hit, they were on the Rock Alternative charts a *lot*, as well as being successful overseas.

I also remember them getting a lot of video channel (MuchMusic) airplay, though I don't know if that extended to the United States or not.

Anyway, no jokes here, because I love this band. I can think of a few of you who will not share that assessment, though.

To that, I say "oh well!"

As a bonus, here's my favourite song of theirs. "Queer" There's just something surreal and awesome about both the song and the video.

Don't forget to take your Dramamine before you watch!

5) Ghost Town DJs: "My Boo" (#31)

Am I the only one who flashes back to Baldur's Gate ("Don't hurt Boo!!!!!") when I see this title? Um, ok, probably.

Oh, cool! Sexy women washing a car and getting into a water fight! How cliched...yet still so hot.

Anyway, this is kind of a fun song. Nothing special, but nothing horrific, either. And it's got a nice beat.

6) Do or Die: "Po Pimp" (#22)

Ok, we couldn't get through a week without one rap song, though at least it's a bit more musical than they usually are. Though I see they follow the trend of naming themselves in the words of the song.

How original.

Anyway, it's the usual thing, so let's move on!

7) Sublime: "What I Got" (#29)

I'm listening to this song, and my main reaction is "eh."

No, that's not the Canadian "eh," as in "Hey, this is great, eh?" More like the "Wow, this song sucks, eh?"

No, not even that. It's more rabid indifference. This song literally does nothing for me.

It doesn't even move me to hit the "next" button.

So I guess that's something, right?

And now, you would think this week's entry would be over, wouldn't you? All the other entries for 1996 have been 7 songs, so this one should be too.

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! You would be wrong!

See somebody can't do math, and somehow divided 5 into 39 and instead of getting a bunch of entries with 8 songs and then one with 7, he got a bunch of entries with 7 songs. I have 4 extra.

So, instead of doing a really massively short entry, I'm going to give you those extras today! This special is good for today only, so if you don't listen today, you have to stop now and listen to the next 4 songs some other day. That's your punishment for not being punctual.

Are they gone? Ok, now to the good stuff. And when I say "good," I mean that I have no idea what's coming next.

8) eels: "Novocaine for the Soul" (#39)

I know I'm getting a bit seasick watching this video.

I think this song and video would make a good piece of Novocaine for the soul. I know it's deadening me right about now. They could probably do major surgery on me right now and I wouldn't notice.

Hey! Where you going with my spleen! Come back!!!!!!!!!

9) Merril Bainbridge: "Mouth" (#4)

I had no idea what this song was when I typed the title, but now I remember it! This song is a lot of fun, and I really like it.

"Would it be my fault if I could turn you on?" Ummmm, yes? You hot thing, you.

Ahem (sorry, don't know what's coming over me today). I want to get the job of generic male molesting the female singer while she's trying to sing in the car.

Where do I go to get that job? And will there be plastic surgery involved? Are you taking applications?

10) Cake: "The Distance" (#35)

Ok, what the heck is with the animal walking into the office? Or the animals on the guy's running route?

Oh no! Santa!!! What did he do with your head?????

This video is just strange. The song is strange, though not in the same way the video is.

I'm just overwhelmed with strangeness right now. In fact, my cat is looking at me funny.

This is a pretty cool song to end the year on, actually. Again, it's not awesome or anything, but it's very listenable (Yay! I make up words!). The video isn't too odd either, which is nice after the last one. Though does anybody get the feeling that the guy with the box was *not* supposed to be in the video and just interrupted them while they were filming?

It's just me?

Ah, well, that's not unusual.

Finally!!!! We've reached the end of 1996, and I hope you've enjoyed this extended version of the one-hit wonders of the 90s. You're just sick with bonus material today, aren't you? Don't feel bad next week when we're back to normal, though. I don't want you to cry or anything.

Now I'm off to make something of the day! It's bright and sunny, so I should probably be productive or something, right?

7
comments:

Interesting week. Better then last week. I actually like some of these. I never heard of any of them. Number 2 was good. She was pretty & had a good voice.Didn't like Stupid girl or the 2nd one & I bet you were talking about me when you made that last comment. You know me too well. Number 5 had a good beat & of course the girls were sexy. Number 9 was sexy to. But it had a good beat.Number 11 had a good beat to. Guess you did better this week. Keep up the good work

I remember everything except for #10...lame!#4 - love this song# 7 - I <3 Sublime, such a shame with Bradley's death#9 - Why was I singing along to this as a kid? lol#11 - DC Talk was awesome! Well I say "was" because they're all in their solo careers now. But just like the Jars of Clay song, didn't know this song made it to the mainstream either.

You liked the Garbage song when it came out? Cool! I had never heard of them before.

As kids, we always sing along with songs that we like, often not really knowing what the words mean. And then we're embarrassed later on in life when we hear it again, remember singing along to it, and have the exact same reaction you did. :)

Any song that had "make love" in it, back before I knew what that term meant, is one example.