Otherwise known as my constant attempts to enter the coveted Land of the Fertile, and stay there.

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

What do stims and Jabba the Hut have in common? Take a guess...

I am on what is now day number 4 of stims.I feel like a fat whale. I did put on jeans yesterday when I went for my pre-admission bloodwork, but they felt a little uncomfortable. I did step on the scale and saw that I didn't gain any weight, but I feel like I'm about 800 pounds, and that I have two tennis balls inside my abdomen. The Follistim (Folli-sting?) stings a bit when it goes in, and for a few minutes afterward. Sunday morning's injection I must have hit a blood vessel, because it bled like a motherfucker and now I have a little bruise there. That kinda sucks.

Oh, yeah, I also have a zit the size of Rhode Island on the side of my nose. Shit.

I went to a different lab location yesterday morning-I like to see different locations, you know, change it up a bit so I don't get bored, and they were so nice-plus, there was nobody in there! Techhie A who drew my blood was great-I didn't even feel it, even though she took four vials, and I didn't bruise-yes! Point for me and my veins! Maybe I'll go there tomorrow morning instead-as long as I get there first thing, I should be on time for my other appointments. I go tomorrow morning for more bloodwork, and another dildocam, to see if there are any follicles growing in there. I definitely feel like there's something cooking in there.

Let's see.....what else is going on? Well, I sang for the whole Triduum-Thursday night, Friday (for 2 services), Saturday Vigil and Sunday morning. I had to bring my shots with me for the entire weekend, which was interesting, to say the least. My friend A (who is also the music minister) gave me his office keys so I could have somewhere private to go, which was nice. The hardest part of it was trying to get everything done quickly, so I could go back upstairs into the church to sing.....it was kinda funny, in a way. The best part was trying to get through the layers that I was wearing to give myself the shots--we wear choir robes that are similar to an altar server-a black cassock with a white cotta over the top, and your street clothes underneath all that. Trying to get through all those clothes was a lot like peeling an onion, but I had it down to a science and was done in about five minutes-point for me!We went to the mother-in-laws for Easter dinner. She had 14 people there, which wasn't as bad as I thought it would be-her house is the size of mine, which is basically a postage stamp. The only thing that kind of pissed me off was the fact that she obviously told everyone that I was doing IVF and was on injectibles-I say obvious because, when we got there, his uncle said, as he was giving me a hug, "So, I hear you're on drugs". Of course he meant it as a joke, I know that, but inside I was saying "Arrrrgh! FUCK!". Then his aunts were asking me all these questions.....hey, don't get me wrong, they were really nice about it and were concerned. It's my own fault-I should have told mother-in-law to zip her lip, but I didn't think she'd tell anyone. We only told our parents, my grandmother, a few really close friends and our siblings what was going on-we purposely didn't tell extended family because we didn't know how they would react-some of them are verrrry Catholic and I didn't want to go into the whole Donum Vitae argument with anyone. I didn't want a lot of people to know, in case it this doesn't work the first time-I don't want to have to explain it to anyone, and then see any pitying looks....totally not what I need right now. But, I do know that she wasn't being a jerk or anything, so I'm trying to keep my hormonal ragings in check.

2 comments:

look out for MONSTER EWCM! Follistim gave me serious EWCM - I almost took a picture of it - it's like walking around with a slip and slide in your pants! :) have fun with that darlin. Sorry aobut the relatives - we're all just so darn gossipy, it's uman nature... ::Hugs::

xoxo,S

PS - I totally got the folistim bruises, too. It would take a few days for them to show up- my thighs looked like I kept bumping into sharp objects... or stucco. :)

Who I Am

This is my story, about a woman in her thirties who's tubally infertile, been through multiple IVF's, too many FET cycles to count and some miscarriages, and trying to deal with the mess of it all. Now, with new and improved Donor IVF! Strap yourself in for the ride though-it's definitely going to be a bumpy one!