6 Signs Your Marriage Will Last a Lifetime

When asked "What keeps your marriage strong?", these women had some unconventional answers. But hey, if it works, it works!

1. When something weird happens, my guy is always the first one I want to text.  Erin W., Highlands Ranch, CO Seeing your guy as your person  the one you want to share gossip or funny observations with  is essential, say Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz, psychotherapists and authors of Building a Love That Lasts. Good couples tend to view their partner as their best friend, says Charles. Having inside jokes and stories is part of what builds that bond. Thats why its key to share funny anecdotes about your day, even if theyre as minor as your coworker freaking out because someone stole her Diet Coke from the communal fridge.

2. He and I may not split chores 50/50 all the time, but we know were on the same team.  Amanda K., Federal Way, WASurprisingly, you dont need to divide everything down the middle to be an amazing couple, says Charles J. Orlando, relationship expert and author of The Problem with Women Is Men. Keeping a score card makes everyone resentful. Yes, you both need to pull your weight around the house, but that doesnt mean its necessary to count changed diapers or scrubbed pans. Having a relationship in which both of you can speak honestly if youre feeling overwhelmed, and not just lash out because someone forgot to take out the recycling one night, leads to a much stronger romance.

3. He still surprises me. At a party, he suddenly jumped up and started singing 'Ring of Fire.' I never even knew he had a voice! Aurea B., Calabasas, CA Obviously, major secrets are not okay in a long-term relationship, but keeping little things to yourself  like taking step-dance classes leading up to your cousins wedding or stocking up on vacation ideas  can boost your bond, says Shauna Springer, Ph.D., author of Marriage, for Equals. Overfamiliarity is the enemy of romance, so continuing to engage in some measure of independent growth is critical.

4. Hes probably the person who can infuriate me the most  even more than my mom  but I wouldnt have it any other way. Becka N, Toronto, ONHealthy couples know how to push each others buttons, and being able to hash it out is ultimately a lot better than holding everything in. Not only that, but couples who experience a steady level of conflict over the years  as opposed to never fighting at first, then constantly being down each others throats five years in  are stronger, according to a 2011 study. The trick is not to let resentments fester, says Gilda Carle, Ph.D., relationship expert and author of Dont Bet on the Prince. Anger is a perfectly healthy emotion. Its fine to get into it, as long as you both know how to apologize and move on, fast."

5. He and I have had our lowest moments together, but have come out on the other side. Amina P., Summit, NJ It says right in the wedding vows that everything wont be a walk in the park, but thats easy to overlook in the tulle-and-cake-induced fugue of your big day. In the ensuing years, surviving the tough stuff together is a huge sign you have what it takes to get through anything. A 2011 study found that couples who believe marriage will last forever, no matter what, survive longer than those who dont fully believe in the concept of till death do us part. Yes, the going will get tough, but knowing youre both 110% committed to staying the course is essential.

6. When Im with him, Im never bored  even on a Saturday spent mulching the backyard. Krissy J., Secaucus, NJResearch shows that couples who do new or different things together  even if it's as simple as a fresh mulching technique  are happier than those who fall into a same-old routines. In the beginning of a relationship, youre going to new places, you both have some insecurity about how the other person feels, and all of that contributes to the butterflies you feel, says psychiatrist Scott Haltzman, M.D., author of Surviving Infidelity. But over time, you relax around each other and can get complacent. You dont need to go bungee jumping, but keeping things fun, like singing songs in the car or playing Just Dance as cardio, can help keep apathy from creeping into your relationship.

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