How To Simplify Baby’s First Year By Using Babywise

As a mother to four children I know how chaotic life with an infant can be. If you have more than one child then things may seem overwhelming at times. Of all the different ways I have tried and advice I have taken to get baby on a routine, Babywise has by far been the best method to achieve that.

Now, there are people who can get by just fine managing life with a baby who eats and sleeps at random times throughout the day. If you’re reading this though, then you are probably not one of those people. It is difficult to be productive or plan your day when there is a newborn who seems to be eating every hour or sleeping all day and awake all night. For those of us who have more than one child and a household to run and possibly a job outside of the home, it can be very beneficial to have a routine in place that allows you to know a general time frame that baby will be eating or napping.

I made use of Babywise with my last two children and it has be a complete blessing. So I am going to share with you the basics of Babywise, how I helped my children into the routine, and the schedules I have used.

There are some general things to consider when deciding if Babywise is right for you and your family. First, I want to say that this is not just for breastfed babies, formula fed babies benefit just as much from Babywise. Second, any method you choose as a parent is completely fine. You know your child best and while I have found Babywise to be best for my family, I know that is not the case for every family. Now here are some general things to keep in mind when putting this method into practice with your family.

Clock Feeding – Sticks to a specified time to feed baby, even if baby shows signs of hunger. This method alone does not take into account growth spurts, milestone markers, or any other outside influence on your child into consideration. Thus, a baby who is in fact hungry after one hour of a previous feeding is not given the bottle or breast until his next scheduled feed even though he is going through a growth spurt and in fact hungry and in need of the extra calories.

Child-led Feeding – Feeding based of baby showing hunger cues, without considering outside factors or consequences. Child-led feeding alone can be extremely exhausting and time consuming. If you are a mother to more than one child then using this method alone can be almost impossible. Child-led feeding allows baby to show any hunger cue (crying, suckling, smacking lips) and be given the bottle or breast, instead of trying to determine if baby may just be tired or need a diaper change. This can lead to snacking (smaller, more frequent feeding) rather than full feedings. The baby will seem to be eating most of the day, but not actually getting any more than he would be if he ate several hours apart for each feeding. So instead of being able to get things done or spend time with other family members, the parent is spending a majority of the day feeding the baby. A huge downside to using this method alone is that when baby is sick he may not wake to nurse and begin to lose weight or become dehydrated.

Parent Directed Feeding is a mixture of both. Here is how PDF is applied and why it is more beneficial for mom and baby than the other two methods used singly. In Parent Directed Feeding if a hunger cue is not shown within a specific time frame then parents can then use the clock to know it is around the time baby should be eating. So, if baby is sick and too lethargic to alert mom to hunger, mom knows to feed baby anyway so dehydration or weight loss does not occur. The other benefit to PDF is parents are more likely to know what baby is crying for based on the routine they have. Instead of wearing themselves out trying to feed, change, or rock baby to sleep with each cry they can look at the clock and assess when baby ate or slept last and know where they are within specified timelines. It makes determining the cause of baby’s crying so much easier, taking stress out of the equation.

Here is an example: If a six-week-old baby eats at 7 AM the parent knows that baby will eat again around 2.5 to 3 hours later. So, when baby wakes at 915 AM and appears hungry, the parent knows that baby is indeed ready to eat. Baby shows hunger cues (as in child-led feeding) and parent has a general time frame for when baby should be hungry again (as in clock feeding) so the parent is now able to better determine that baby is likely ready to eat again.

Another example: Baby eats at 7 AM, has wake time and goes down for nap then wakes at 830 AM begins acting as if he wants to nurse. Well, the parents see the hunger cue and think okay I will feed him (child-led feeding), but then they notice he ate only 1.5 hours ago (clock feeding) so now the parent is able to determine that baby is likely not hungry, but may just need help getting back to sleep.

Instead of just applying one method to determine what could be wrong with baby, both methods are applied. When parents know what baby needs it takes stress away from baby and from the parents. Without a screaming baby or a parent who is unavailable because of constant feedings, there is more time for the entire family to enjoy together.

Babywise uses Cycles as a basis for the routine. Each cycle has the same step-by-step process of eat, wake, sleep. The reason this cycle process works so well is because baby is not relying on eating to fall asleep, thus he is getting a full feed each time because he is alert and wide awake. This full feed will lead to a better nap time which helps aid in nighttime sleep in the long run. And if you’ve ever had an overtired baby then you know how exhausting and frustrating that can be for everyone.

If there is a change in the time of a feeding just adjust the daily schedule accordingly. Just make sure you start the first feed at the same time each morning.

Make sure that there Is adequate wake time so that baby gets a good nap, without good naps there will not be full feedings and this could transition into a wake-feed-sleep schedule which is what you do not want. Waketime includes start of feeding, changing, and all other activity until nap time.

For 0-3 weeks that is typically 30 minutes total and then baby naps for 1.5 hours.

About 3 weeks they start extending the waketime to close to an hour and nap 1.5-2 hours.

At around 6 weeks waketimes begin extending to between 60-80 minutes followed by 1.5-2-hour nap.

Around 12 weeks waketime will extend to around 90 minutes followed by 1.5-2-hour nap.

Waketime activities should include time with family and independent play

Family time Activities:

Feeding

Singing

Reading

Bath time

Playing: smiles, cooing, laughing, and cuddles.

Walks in the sling or stroller

Independent Play:

Bouncer

Tummy time (30 minutes per day is recommended)

Swing

Exersaucer

Bumbo Seat

Sleeping –

Newborn 17-19 hours per day

3-4 Weeks 16-18 hours per day

5-7 Weeks 15-18 Hours per day

8-12 Weeks 14-17 Hours per day

13-16 Weeks 13-17 Hours per day

17-24 Weeks 13-16 Hours per day

25-38 Weeks 13-15 Hours per day

30-52 Weeks 12-15 Hours per day

Merges are another thing you will need to keep in mind when using Babywise. A merge is the changing needs from one stage of growth to the next. There are seven in the first year.

Some things to remember when determining if baby is ready for the next merge are:

If baby is physically capable of handling longer times between feeds and naps.

Babywise is a general guideline, each baby will ultimately determine the length of time between each feed as they age.

First and Last feeding principle, try to keep first feed of the time consistent everyday within a 20-minute time range. When baby begins sleeping eight hours at night all cycles will fall between the first and last feed of the day.

Merges do not happen at the exact same time for all children. Each merge will occur and they typically occur in a generalized age range, but while one baby may begin sleeping through the night at eight weeks another baby may not start until ten weeks.

Two steps forward and one step back principle, each merge may take a few days to a week to become established as a new normal, just follow your child’s lead and keep first feeding consistent each day. Your child will let you know what they can handle and the cycles can be arranged accordingly.

Okay so now let’s get to the fun part and talk about how I personally used this method and made it work for my family. I am going to use my youngest son as any examples throughout this post. Remember every baby is different and will hit each merge at a different age. For ex.: Alex hit merge one at 6 weeks, not 3-5 weeks.

Now, the key to getting your baby on a routine is to start with part of the routine until baby has that down and then start on another thing. I started with feedings because that is the first thing the baby will do during each cycle. After we had full feedings in a general time frame I worked on nap times because that is the other main part of the cycle when the baby is still young and not having lengthy wake times.

Newborn:

Eat – 2 hours apart, Sleep – 17-19 hours per day

During the first three weeks of baby’s life you do not need to be worried about a strict schedule or getting baby into a routine. The focus right now should be helping baby learn day from night. To do this wake baby to eat two hours after his last feeding during the day. Night time feedings baby will likely wake around the 2.5-3-hour mark at this age, do not let baby sleep longer than four hours at this point. Start timing at the start of feeding, not at the end. Ex: you feed baby at 7 AM, you need to feed baby again at 9 AM.

When baby is awake and eating throughout the day keep the area bright and lit up.At night make sure it is dark and quiet. Doing this will help him see that when it is light out that is when he should be eating, awake and interacting with people, but when it is dark he should be eating and going right back to sleep.

Here is what the schedule will look like for a newborn:

630 A.M. – Get dressed, diaper change, feeding

7 A.M. – Down for nap

830 A.M. – Diaper change, feeding

9 A.M. – Down for nap

1030 A.M. – Diaper change, feeding

11 A.M. – Down for nap

1230 P.M. – Diaper change, feeding

1 P.M. – Down for a nap

230 P.M. – Diaper change, feeding

3 P.M. – Down for a nap

430 P.M. – Diaper change, feeding

5 P.M. – Down for a nap

630 P.M. – Diaper change, feeding

7 P.M. – Down for a nap

830 P.M. – Bath & PJ’s, feeding

9 P.M. – Down for the night

Middle of the night feeds were usually around 12 AM and 330 AM

Merge One (3-5 Weeks)Combine MOTN Feed to One Feed

Eat – 2.5 hours apart, Sleep – 15-18 hours per day

Again, you should still be working on getting baby to eat most of his calories during the day. So, continue waking baby to eat throughout the day, if baby is gaining well then you can increase the feeding interval to 2.5 hours. At this merge baby will begin to combine the two middle of the night feeds into one. This will happen easily if the late evening feed is 10-11 PM. Baby will more than likely not sleep longer than four hours at night so if you feed at 10 PM then baby should likely wake around 2 AM and 6 AM.

The other thing to begin working on is getting baby to sleep during each cycle. Once baby hits four weeks, a growth spurt and mental leap occurs and nap times are harder to achieve because baby is growing more alert. During growth spurts and mental leaps feed on demand and do a lot of comforting because baby needs you during these rough times.

Also, around this age most babies begin having “fussy periods” in the evening. These “fussy periods” are rough I won’t even try to sugar coat it. I remember having to hold Alex from 3 PM until 830 PM some evenings, which was hard since I have two kids get home from school at 3 PM and we have homework, snack, dinner, baths and bedtime all between 3-8 PM. This brief period only lasted for about two weeks though with Alex, it lasted for a month with Tom. Try to remember that as frustrating as is it for you, baby is going through A LOT mentally and physically so it is much worse for him.

I personally do not like letting my children “cry it out” at this age because I feel you should be establishing trust in the relationship with baby. I found that carrying baby in my wrap or just sitting down with him and comforting him (even if it was hours’ worth of comforting lol) really helped and he quickly passed through that phase. Sometimes Alex did not nap at all in between feeds during this phase, but even a five minute nap in your arms is better than no nap at all. Baby will not get a full feeding if he is not well rested.

If holding baby or putting him in a swing is the only way to get baby to sleep, then do so because baby needs to be well rested. Without adequate sleep, there will not be full feedings which in turn creates poor sleep. It is a vicious cycle so just make sure to do whatever is necessary to get baby to sleep, even for five minutes, during each cycle. Bad sleeping habits will not form at this age so do not be worried about that.

Here is what his schedule looked like starting around 3 weeks:

630 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

730 A.M. Nap

9 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

10 A.M. Nap

1130 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

1230 P.M. Nap

2 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

3 P.M. Nap (Usually in my arms or the wrap)

430 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

530 P.M. Nap (Usually in my arms or the wrap)

645 P.M. Bath & PJ’sop

7 P.M. Feeding, down for nap (He would usually fall asleep about 730-830 in his bassinet)

930 P.M. Diaper change, feeding and down for the night

MOTN Feeding around 1 and 430

At six weeks Alex reached Merge One. I think what helped him reach this merge was putting him in his own room, starting a bed time routine and being vigilant about his late evening feeding being at 10 PM. Prior to moving him into his own room he was waking every thirty minutes from 3 AM until 5 AM. I read that baby and mom sleep much better when they are not in the same room so I decided to try it. Not only did he start taking better naps, but nighttime sleep improved drastically.

Making the transition from parent’s room to baby’s room is made easier if you start with nap times in his room and hanging out during the day in there. Baby will get used to the room and feel comfortable enough to sleep in there for the longer sleep stretch at night.

Now is also an appropriate time to begin a simple bed time routine. For Alex that meant he gets his bath, puts on pg.’s, gets swaddled, he nurses, we read a story and then he gets put in bed. He quickly took to this routine and has no problem falling asleep within minutes of me laying him down at night.

Here is what his schedule looked like after merge one:

630 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

8 A.M. Nap

9 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

10 A.M. Nap

1130 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

1 P.M. Nap

2 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

3 P.M. Nap

430 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

6 P.M. Nap (This nap usually lasted about thirty minutes or less.)

7 P.M. Bath, swaddle, feeding, story and down for the night by 730

10 P.M. Feeding, down for the night

230 MOTN Feeding and diaper change

Merge Two (7-10 Weeks) Drop MOTN Feeding

Eat – 2.5-3 hours apart, Sleep – 14-17 hours per day

The focus now should be on sleep, rather than feeding. To aid in reaching Merge Two, if you are comfortable with it, start teaching baby to self soothe. As I said earlier, I do not like letting my children cry until sleep happens because that isn’t really soothing them it seems to just wear them out and they pass out. What I do is let Alex fuss for about five minutes if he is struggling to sleep and then I go in to calm him and we repeat the process. It does not take long for him to fall asleep and instead of screaming himself to exhaustion, he is calm after I leave and falls asleep naturally. This has worked very well for me and my babies, but everyone is different so do whatever you are comfortable with.

Naps may become a struggle at this point, but just keep making sure baby is sleeping during each cycle. If baby wakes early from a nap try to get him back to sleep before trying anything else. If baby is not going back to sleep then go ahead and try to feed him if it is within a reasonable timeframe to the next feeding. Since baby may be waking early from naps, try to avoid letting him stay up too long without eating because then you will get into a wake, eat, sleep schedule and that is not what you want. When baby is eating and then falling asleep it quickly becomes a sleep prop. Soon when baby wakes he will need to be fed to fall back to sleep so instead of full feedings, he will be snacking all day. That can be exhausting for Mom and it makes it difficult to spend time with other children or your husband.

Alex reached Merge Two late because of me. I was worried that I would have a lot of sleepless nights if I tried to give him his pacifier instead of the breast when he woke. I would strongly suggest facing that fear if you are thinking the same. Plan and prepare for a few sleepless nights so that you can begin moving towards a full nights sleep. If you are noticing your baby waking at close to the same time each night then he likely is not actually hungry, but waking because his internal clock is set to wake at that time. For Alex that was 230 A.M. At 14 weeks I decided it was time to just suck it up and get through a few rough nights to help Alex reach this merge. Surprisingly, he woke at 230 A.M. the first night, took his pacifier and didn’t wake again until I woke him at 645 A.M. to eat. The second night he woke at 315 A.M. and put himself back to sleep within minutes. He hasn’t woken since the second night and he is now sleeping from 730 P.M. until 645 A.M. with a dream feed at 10 P.M. I will do this for a week and then work on dropping the dream feed since he should be reaching that merge now.

Here is what his schedule looks like at Merge Two:

630 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

8 A.M. Nap

9 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

10 A.M. Nap

1130 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

1 P.M. Nap

2 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

315 P.M. Nap

430 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

6 P.M. Nap

7 P.M. Bath, swaddle, feeding, story and down for the night by 730

10 P.M. Dream feed

Merge Three (12-15 Weeks) Drop the Late Night Feed (or for me it is the Dream Feed)

Eats – 2.5-3 hours apart, Sleep – 13-17 hours per day

Continue working on getting baby to self soothe and get himself to sleep. Naps may still be an issue, so continue working with baby to get good naps in so he is getting full feedings and this helps with a full night of sleep. Establishing a bedtime routine if you haven’t already done so would be very effective at this point. It teaches baby that it is bedtime, not just nap time because he learns that once this routine happens he won’t see you until morning rather than in a couple of hours.

Alex reached this merge pretty late, at 20 weeks. On the nights that I would skip his 10 P.M. feeding he would wake so much after 2 A.M. because he was hungry. I noticed when he was about 18 weeks he began nursing for less time at that late night feeding. By the time he hit the 20 week mark he was only nursing for about five minutes on one side, so one night I decided to try to feed him at 7 P.M. and put him to bed. He has not had the late night feeding since.

I want to point out that he reached this merge pretty late, but I have noticed he is reaching all of the merges past the general time frame and that is okay with me. Each baby is different and all four of mine have reached these stages at different points. So, if your baby appears to be struggling to reach these milestones then do not be alarmed or try to force it. Every human is completely unique and one day you will miss these special nighttime moments!

This merge creates one feed between the early morning and lunch feeding. You will begin extending the amount of time between each cycle and baby will also begin taking a catnap in the evening rather than a full nap.

Alex reached this merge right around the same time at merge three, at 21 weeks. I did change part of his routine and began giving him a bath after his evening feeding rather than at bedtime. Having a bed time routine with bath included may be something you love doing and you should continue that. For me though it works better to bathe my kids before dinner, so after we come in from outside in the evening they all shower and bathe while I cook dinner. I like to be able to relax after I eat so giving baths before dinner has always worked better for me. I always intended to move his bathtime to the same time as my other kids and Alex is doing so well with bedtime that I can do that now. We are also tying to transition from being swaddled to having his arms out, that has proven to be quite a struggle because he moves so much. It is getting easier though and I honestly can’t believe he is already five months old!

The schedule after Merge Four took place looks like this:

645 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

830 A.M. Nap

10 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

1130 A.M. Nap

1 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

3 P.M. Nap

4-430 P.M. Diaper change, feeding, bath

6 P.M. *Cat nap

7 P.M. Feeding, story, then down for bed by 730

Merge Five (24-37 Weeks) Longer wake times, drops full afternoon nap for a catnap usually around dinnertime.

Eats – 3.5-4.5 hours apart, Sleeps – 13-15 hours per day

If solids haven’t been introduced yet, then they likely will begin being introduced at six months. Wake times are further apart and the afternoon nap has been reduced to a catnap. Catnaps are typically 30 minutes to 1 hour in length. While Merge Four schedule had a possible catnap in the evening, Merge Five is completely removing the afternoon nap and baby will likely need a catnap now due to this.

Alex reached this merge at 32 weeks. The cat nap he took was very short, maybe thirty minutes total and he did not stay on this routine for very long.

After this merge baby’s schedule will look like this:

630 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

830 A.M. Nap

10 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

12 P.M. Nap

2 P.M. Diaper change, feeding (milk & solids introduction)

430 P.M. Catnap

5 P.M. Diaper change, feeding

630 P.M. Bath, swaddle, liquid feeding, story and down for the night by 7

Merge Six (28-40 Weeks) Drop the catnap at end of day

Eats – 3.5-4.5 hours apart, Sleep – 13-15 hours per day

The main difference between merge five and six is that the evening catnap is dropped. Baby is likely eating solids now and that should be incorporated into baby’s schedule. I include solids twice a day at this point because I am still nursing for the other feedings. Whatever you feel comfortable doing and what is best for your baby is what you should do.

Alex reached this merge at 36 weeks. The kids were home for summer vacation and we typically play outside every afternoon so with all that excitement he just gave up the catnap. I did start him on table foods at nine months. He began eating the same dinner with us and did really well with that. I have fed baby food to my other three children until about fifteen to eighteen months, but they are very picky eaters. I read a lot about baby led weaning and starting table foods early and how it prevents picky eating so I decided to give it a go. So far, he is doing really well and likes most of what I have given him.

Here is what baby’s schedule will look like after Merge Six takes place:

630 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding

830 A.M. Nap

1030 A.M. Diaper change, feeding

12 P.M. Nap

230 P.M. Diaper change, feeding (solids only)

530 P.M. Diaper Change, finger foods with the family while we eat

7 P.M. Bath, swaddle, liquid feeding, story and down for the night by 730

Merge Seven (46-52 Weeks) No more liquid feed before bed

Well your baby has almost reached his first birthday and you have certainly come a long way together. Way to go Mama! You have helped create a sense of security and predictability for baby during the past year and while he cannot say how much he appreciates it, I am sure baby does!

Alex reached this merge early at 44 weeks. I began feeding table food for breakfast at 38 weeks. I then introduced lunches and snacks at 40 weeks, so he was down to nursing twice a day. He just slowly stopped wanting to nurse, which was okay with me because I was hoping to have him weaned by 15 months. So, he was only nursing at breakfast and before bed at this point. We dropped the breakfast feeding not soon after he reached this merge and his birthday was the last time he nursed before bed. It was bittersweet, but he just was no longer interested. It is hard to believe where this journey began and how far we have come. It’d be nice to rewind and relive certain moments, but I am excited to see what this next year has in store for my sweet boy.

Here is what baby’s schedule looks like after Merge Seven:

7 A.M. Diaper change, get dressed, feeding (milk & solids)

9 A.M. Nap

1130 A.M. Diaper change, feeding (solids only)

130 P.M. Nap

4 P.M. Diaper change, feeding (finger food snack)

530 P.M. Dinner time with family (milk & solids)

7 P.M. Bath, swaddle, story and down for the night by 730

So that’s it! I hope that Babywise helps you family out as much as it did mine. Setting a routine in place for your children is such a positive way to impact them. They do not yet realize that our internal clocks work on a routine-type system so easing them into a routine helps them thrive physically, mentally, and emotionally. If you have any questions leave them in the comments below! Good luck with your new little one!

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Hi! Thank you so much for sharing this! Your schedule is very close in timing/feedings with mine. I have twin girls and they are 33 weeks so we will be approaching merge six soon. Did you have a hard time dropping a bottle feed and replacing with only solids? Right now we do 6oz bottles at 6, 10, 2, then solids/finger foods around 5-5:30 then another 6oz bottle at bedtime. I have been mixing formula/breastmilk with their oatmeal/baby food because I feel like they don’t take in as much milk as other babies do. I know all babies are different and my girls are smaller (16 lbs at 7 months) so I don’t know if I should be concerned to drop a bottle feeding with the next merge or not? I hope that makes sense! Thanks for your time!

Thank you so SO much!! I used Babywise with my first child and now that we are expecting our second I am keen to give it another go. I don’t feel like I fully got my head around it the first time though, and I have had terrible foggy brain this pregnancy. I have been re-reading the book but have just felt like I’m just not getting it. Was not looking forward to sitting down and summarizing it and writing up sample schedules again. Thank you for your hard work writing this article and for the sample schedules- this takes off a load! God bless you 🙂

Congratulations on your second baby! Yes, I actually wrote the post because I was rereading the book and trying to summarize it all and figure it out again before my last baby was born. There is just so much information lol it is difficult when you have pregnancy brain to take it all in and remember any of it the next day. Good luck with your newest love and I am so glad that I was able to help you out some!