How To Put On A Brave Face When Running Into Your Ex

Running into your ex doesn't always have to be super unpleasant and awkward. Here's how to handle that unexpected encounter!

By
Thalia Ortiz

Aug 06, 2013

Tamara Schlesinger

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Let's face it, nearly 100 percent of the time running into your ex after a messy breakup isn't fun. I absolutely hate that nervous-butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling I would get after seeing an ex post splitsville. It didn't take long until I would call up one of my chicas and dish on something embarrassing I did or said. After a while though, I started to realize that there is a way to run into your ex without wanting you crawl under a rock after. It all comes down to putting on a brave face no matter what the situation is.

En La Tienda De Cafe

Hate to break it to you, but it's not always possible to go unnoticed in a coffee shop or restaurant when your ex is around. Instead, the best thing is just to get it over with and be the first one to say hi. By doing this, you're showing that you're not a coward and that seeing him is no biggie. Inevitably the question that always comes up during these encounters is "how have you been?" This is the perfect opportunity to show him how much you've moved on since the breakup and that it's the last thing on your mind. I would talk about any exciting life changes, like career updates or something as small as a new hobby. It's so easy to break the ice this way and it reminds you that you don't need your ex anymore when you have so many things to invest your energy into.

En La Fiesta

Usually, you can save face and be able to make it through the night without seeing each other at a party. There are so many people around that it's not really considered offensive if you don't go out of your way to approach him. If it's a girl's night out with your amigas, don't let his presence rattle you up and make you into a drunken mess! Just keep dancing and having fun. Also, don't do something you'll regret like make out with some random guy for the sake of making him jealous. It will make you look immature and it shows your ex that you care way too much about what he thinks. In the event that you guys do make eye contact, don't pretend like you didn't notice him. Again, go up to him and say hello really quick. If you're with one of your friends, introduce them instead of awkwardly having them stand there. Even a wave is better than nothing if you're really not up for chatting.

En La Calle

This one is probably the most unexpected way to run into your ex. Remember that episode of Sex and The City where Miranda saw Steve on the street post-breakup and she ran for the hills? Yeah, don't do that. Even though seeing him caught you off guard during your morning commute, just stop and say hello for a minute. It doesn't have to be a long conversation and you can both go about your business after. It will be more awkward if he sees you crossing the street to avoid him, so just take a deep breath and say something friendly like "hey, long time no see!" If you two really ended on bad terms, he might be angry, insult you or start causing a scene. Just stay calm, let him get everything off his chest, apologize if necessary and keep it moving. You can offer to meet up to talk about it more some other time, but it's best to keep these encounters brief and try to leave asap instead of adding more fuel to the fire.