How would you like people to be authenticated? Like have someone check copies of ID cards whether they say "BrowserUK" before admitting someone? Run soundex or "graphex" on user names before allowing them? Not admitting users unless they can prove ownership of a like-named account on another forum with at least $n posts?

Can't be "authenticating" as in "checking that the user is actually the owner of the account she's trying to use" as there's nothing wrong with how that's implemented as far as I can see.