Wedding Registries Informative - This may solve some of the problems

TROY, MICHIGAN -- Last week I received a wedding invitation. Along with the usual listing of Bridal Registries was a business card from TC Federal Credit Union. The card reads:

"Matri Money
The way to give wedding cash.
Marriage is a beginning, and we've opened a MatriMoney account at T&C Federal Credit Union to get us started. We'll use some money for important things we need right now, but we'll also use this account to save for the future.

Any gift you choose is special because you're special to us.

Should you wish to make a deposit into our MatriMoney account, see the reverse side of this card."

On the reverse are ten locations listed.

With all the complaints we see about trying to return/exchange gifts bought from a Bridal Registry (mostly Target), this may be the best solution to the problem.

Let the newlyweds do their own shopping. In that way they can be sure of no duplicates. However I can see a problem with this particular wedding. On both the Wal*Mart registry and the Bed Bath & Beyond registry, they chose the same vacuum cleaner, along with other items on each.

I think my gift to the couple will be using the MatriMoney account they've set up. Saves the hassle of shopping, too.

But doesn't general etiquette frown on this sort of suggestion from the couple?
It makes sense, I agree, but some folks may find it tacky.

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

I think it's a bit tacky too. It's just slightly less tacky than sending a married couple the following invitation to a wedding. The invitation reads "Admit One"..."Additional Invitations for your Guests are available in advance for $50, or $75 at the door."
What's next...billing the invitees instead of inviting them.

Posted by GothicSmurf on 2008-04-07:

To have that listed in the invitation is beyond tacky. But a brilliant idea.

Posted by heaven17 on 2008-04-07:

Oh, and speaking of etiquette, some of you may or may not be familiar with the website ETIQUETTE HELL.
Check it out sometime. Hours of fun and disbelief to be had.

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

Thanks heaven!!! I'm on my way there now...I can use a good laugh.

Posted by Ponie on 2008-04-07:

I thought about the tackiness and poor etiquette aspect when I read the card, too. But I believe there was a time when Bridal Registries were first offered people looked down on them too.

Ghost, I guess I'm safe. Since I'm a single, the invitation was addressed '& Guest' so I won't have to pay to bring someone along with me. :)

Gothic, I don't know if I understood your comment clearly. This info wasn't printed on the invitation. They were all business cards in the envelope, along with the RSVP card. I think there's a website called Weddings.com (or something like that) where you enter the name of either the bride or the groom and it displays all the stores where the couple is registered.

Thanks for your responses.

Posted by yoke on 2008-04-07:

It is not any more tacky then having a dollar dance at the wedding.

Posted by *Brenda* on 2008-04-07:

It is tacky. I didn't even include those registry cards they gave us in my invitations. If someone asked I told them where we were registered, if not then we get what they wanted to give us.

Posted by GothicSmurf on 2008-04-07:

Pony-

Yeah, still recovering from my mini vacation over the weekend. My mistake. I meant I thought it was tacky to include that information (in any capacity) with the invitation itself.

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

Just got in from etiquettehell. Too funny for words.
"When hosting a formal dinner, always have a garbage can at each end of the table, so guests don't have to throw their olive and peach pits under the table."
"If you have a glass eye, don't sit at the table and scratch it with your fork."
"Is chicken correctly eaten with the fingers? No, chicken is correctly eaten with the mouth. One may use their fingers to stuff it into one's mouth."
"What kind of wine goes with Spam?"

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

Those are great!!!

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

More social faux pas...

What is the correct social response to the following?
"You boor! How DARE you F-RT before my wife!"

A gentleman always responds with:
"I'm sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."

Posted by Anonymous on 2008-04-07:

LOLOLOLOL!! I did actually laugh out loud at that one. Now, I must explain myself at work.

Posted by Nohandle on 2008-04-07:

Ponie, good informative review. No offense to your friends but sometimes only one or two invitations arrive like yours and others assume that is the norm for this day and age. Perhaps your friends received one like that or it was suggested to them by someone who had. I find it in poor taste to say the least.

Registeries have been around as far back as I can remember. My mom relied on them. She picked up the phone, called the store, selected a gift, had the item gift wrapped and delivered. Guess what I do? Difficult to change habits sometimes.

I've never received an invitation like yours but did receive once for an out of town wedding, in a separate mailing, a listing of patterns chosen and local stores where they were registered and the "colors of choice" should someone want to send linens or that sort of thing. It didn't offend me in the least because it was a suggestion, nicely done and saved me a bit of trouble.

I've been known also to mail a Wedding Card and enclose a check. That to me would be the same as mailing one to the TC Federal Credit Union in the account set up by the bride and groom. Let them use the money on items they later find they need.

I personally like the idea of the MatriMoney account. I think a lot of etiquette no longer applies anymore as it used to. People have 2nd and 3rd baby showers, have lavish 2nd and even 3rd weddings, etc.

Posted by CrystalSword on 2008-04-10:

I kind of liked the idea of the Credit Union account...a friend had a box set up at her reception for gifts of cash and checks and someone walked off with the whole box, at least with the account you KNOW where the money is!