My father once took me to the Grand Ole Opry. There, I saw Mel Tillis perform “Coca-Cola Cowboy” and I can still remember it.

September 24, 2017

Hendersonville, Tennessee—I'm on stage playing music within spitting distance from Nashville.

Nashville.

Before today, I’ve only been here once in my entire life. I was a redheaded seven-year-old at the time. My father worked a few years in Spring Hill, welding column splices that would one day become a General Motors plant.

I visited the GM plant today. A non-descript iron continent. My father called it his greatest achievement.

My father once took me to the Grand Ole Opry. There, I saw Mel Tillis perform “Coca-Cola Cowboy” and I can still remember it.

The stage lights, the barn-themed set, men with white hair and cowboy hats, playing two-step rhythms.

Afterward, we bought ice cream. We sat on a bench looking at neon lights.

My father said, “All my life, I've only heard the Opry on a radio. I think I like it better on a radio.”

I hardly remember the rest of that night. But I do remember fiddles, pedal steels, corny jokes. And I remember feeling happy.

So, I'm here. I'm thinking about life, and how short it is. For Joe Six-Pack

like me, this is as close to heaven as I’ll ever get.

My father died when I was twelve. I hung drywall and laid tile at seventeen. I cut lawns, threw sod, and planted shrubs at eighteen.

At twenty, I played guitar in a small Baptist church. At twenty-one: I played in beer joints and all-you-can-eat catfish buffets.

I guess what I’m trying to say is: I’m happy. I mean really happy.

Today, I’m on a stage with my friends, playing guitar not far from my father’s greatest monument.

In the audience, I see a little redheaded girl with pigtails.

She looks so happy.

I'm singing with my friends. The same friends I’ve played music with for many years. They’ve seen me grow up. They’ve helped me become me.

The old woman’s purse starts ringing. She digs through it. Soon, she is talking on a flip phone. She’s using a voice that’s sweet enough to spread on toast.

September 22, 2017

Cracker Barrel—I’m eating bacon and eggs. In the background: Ernest Tubb is singing about waltzing across Texas. I've been on an interstate all morning.

There is an old woman at a table near ours. She was here before my wife and I arrived. Her white hair is fixed up. She is wiry, wearing a nice zebra-striped Sunday blouse.

She smiles at me.

She is alone, sipping coffee. It doesn't take long to strike up chit-chat.

She has lines on her face, and a husky voice. She is from the old world. She calls me “sweetheart” twice in the same sentence.

And even though I don’t know her, I know her type. I'll bet she prepares chicken and dumplings that would make clergymen use the Lord’s name in vain.

She tells me that for most of her life, she’s been a mother and a wife.

Her husband died many years ago. She has two kids. A son, a daughter. She hardly sees either.

“My daughter and I are supposed to be having lunch today,” she tells me, looking at her watch.

“My grandbabies should be here any second. I can't WAIT to kiss them all.”

Those lucky grandbabies.

From what I learn, the aforementioned daughter and grandchildren lead busy lives. The grandkids stay occupied with soccer, baseball, ballet, mission trips, and various special activities that require special T-shirts.

The old girl tries to get together with them as often as she can. But schedules get in the way.

Last week, she decided to drive a few hours to attend her grandson’s soccer game. She packed her folding chair, her snacks, and arrived early.

She waited for one hour on the sidelines of an empty field. A maintenance man told her the game had been cancelled.

Nobody had told Granny.

The old woman’s purse starts ringing. She digs through it. Soon, she is talking on a flip phone. She’s using a voice…

And look at all these birds, perched on fence posts, flying in the air. I wish you were here with me. You might see these birds and think like I'm thinking

September 21, 2017

DEAR SEAN:

I'm pretty sure my mom is dying and we don’t know if she’s going to make it long. A doctor told us she will probably not and she wants us to start talking about funerals. I’m so afraid of life right now, please write something for me.

THIRTEEN AND I DON’T WANT TO LOSE MY MOM

DEAR THIRTEEN:

The sun is coming up over the green hills of Crenshaw County right now. Rutledge, Alabama, isn’t far away from me.

Have you ever been to Crenshaw County? It’s nothing but hayfields, chickenweed, and cattle.

This sun is spectacular. No. It’s breath-stealing. Especially with all this hay around.

There is something about the way hay smells in the morning. It makes me feel a pleasant, heavy feeling in my chest. It makes me feel—how do I put this—very, very small.

See, while I write this, I'm looking at seventeen trillion acres of hay bales. I’m on a two-lane highway, I have the windows rolled down.

If that doesn't make you feel small.

And look at all these birds, perched on fence posts, flying in the air. I wish you

were here with me. You might see these birds and think like I'm thinking.

Did you ever wonder how many meals a bird eats? Or: who feeds them? Or: how many meals YOU'VE eaten since you were born?

During my time on earth—and this is only a rough estimate—I’ve eaten fifty or sixty THOUSAND meals.

That’s not even counting boiled peanuts or ice cream.

You heard me right. No matter how sad things get, nor how bad life seems, I am like a bird who manages to find food. Somehow.

Anyway, the sun is getting higher now. It glows orange on the world.

I see a horse. She’s gray, and she's galloping with a colt who's keeping pace behind. You ought to see them, they're poetry.

My father once wanted to be Navy pilot. He failed the physical exam into flight school. He was deaf on his left side. He’d spent a childhood wanting to see the world from the top, but he had to settle for posters.

September 19, 2017

Hank Williams music is playing on an old radio, sitting on a workbench. I’m nine. Hank’s voice bounces off the garage.

The room smells like gasoline and dirt. The walls are covered—and I mean covered—in posters of jet planes.

My father once wanted to be Navy pilot. He failed the physical exam into flight school. He was deaf on his left side. He’d spent a childhood wanting to see the world from the top, but he had to settle for posters.

“Toss me that wrench,” says Daddy.

He slides from beneath the Ford. There is a longneck bottle in his hand. Daddy sings along with the radio. He sounds like a dog with a chest infection.

“Daddy, will you ever fly a plane?”

“Nah, too deaf and stupid. Pilots ain’t deaf or stupid.”

“YOU’RE stupid?”

“Compared to a pilot. They got big IQ’s, they can practically move inanimate objects with their minds.”

“What’s inanimate?”

“It means UN-animate-like.”

My father walks to a white Philco refrigerator. He removes a bottle. He pops the cap with a box-wrench.

“You know,” he says. “I didn’t WANNA be a steelworker. I was kinda

backed into it. Always WANTED to be a pilot. Wanted to see the world from up top.”

I look at him. He's bone skinny. He has grease on his face and hands. There are scrapes on his veiny forearms. My father always had cuts and scrapes. It was the price of blue-collar workaholism.

“But Daddy,” I suggest. “You can STILL be a pilot. Billy’s daddy knows a man who gives flying lessons.”

My father takes a pull on the bottle. He smiles. He is all stubble and crow’s feet.

“Gotta be rich to take flying lessons,” he says.

“We could save up.”

“Take a lotta saving.”

“I’ll save ALL my money.”

He rubs his chin. It makes a sandpaper sound. “Guess I could take up flying during retirement,” he says.

Sean of the South In Your Inbox

Subscribe to Sean of the South and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Email

Sean Dietrich

Sean Dietrich is a columnist, and novelist, known for his commentary on life in the American South. His work has appeared in Southern Living, The Tallahassee Democrat, Good Grit, South Magazine, Alabama Living, the Birmingham News, Thom Magazine, The Mobile Press Register, and he has authored seven books.