Wisdom of the Ages

The Little Things Are Often The Big Things

One of the biggest joys in my life is conducting or officiating at weddings. Last year 45 couples honored me by having me perform their wedding ceremonies. One of the things I tell them is that a good marriage must be created and the little things are often the big things, such as…….

I then tell them it is not only marrying the right partner but being the right partner. I think these ideas are appropriate for existing marriages or actlually for any relationship or even friendship with some of it being paraphrased a bit. See what you think:

Never being too old to hold hands.

Remembering to say “I love you” at least once a day - even on days where there have been differences between you.

Never going to sleep angry.

Having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.

Standing together facing the world, in good times and in times of challenges.

Speaking words of appreciation to each other and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

Having the capacity to forgive, and then forgetting what you forgave.

Giving each other an atmosphere in which to grow.

Listening to each other, to hear not only words, but also the language of tone, mood and expression as you reveal to each other your dreams,aspirations and inner feelings.

Never both be angry at once.

Never yell at each other unless the house is on fire.

Yield to the wishes of the other as an exercise in self-discipline if you can’t think of a better reason.

If you have a choice between making yourself or your partner look good - choose your partner.

If you feel you must criticize, do so lovingly - and criticize the action, not the person.

Never bring up a mistake of the past.

Neglect the whole world (including kids) rather than each other.

Never meet without an affectionate welcome.

When you’ve made a mistake, talk it out and ask for forgiveness.

Remember, it takes two to make an argument. The one who is wrong is the one who will be doing most of the talking.