As November is coming to a close, his e-book could not have come at a more perfect time for me to kickoff December with an experiment taken from his e-book. For the sake of giving it a more catchy name, I have decided to call it The $1 Negativity Experiment.

To paraphrase Ramit’s description of the experiment, here’s an outline of the experiment:

Goal: Improve the quality of life for myself and the people around me by eliminating negative comments (about myself or anyone else) from my daily conversation.

Procedure:

#1. I will go to the bank tomorrow and take out $50 in single dollar bills.

#2. Every time I make a negative comment, I have to give a dollar to the person I’m speaking to. If I am speaking to the person over the phone or online, then I will ask that person who they would like me to give it to (whether it’s a stranger or whomever).

#3. If I run out of single dollar bills, I will go to the bank and withdraw another $50 in single dollar bills.

#4. At the end of the month, I will record how much money I have remaining.

#5. I will continue this experiment until my monetary ratio of money withdrawn to money given out is 1% or less.

This may sound crazy to many of you, but I’m with Ramit on this one when I think that this will have a dramatic impact on my life if I’m successful. So here’s to the first of many crazy experiments to not only breaking the norm, but living a fuller and richer life.

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80’s arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb.

He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.

He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, “And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?”

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, “She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.”

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, “That is the kind of love I want in my life.”

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything they have.

‘Life isn’t about
how to survive the storm,
But how to dance in the rain.’

I hope that you’ve found this post to be as inspirational as I did when I first read it. And if you did, please pass this along to anyone else who you think would benefit from this post’s message. Till next week.

It was regular weekday night when I was perusing through Netflix and happened to see this documentary show-up. Documentary? On sushi? Yes please! (Did I mention I was getting ready to eat dinner?)

For those who haven’t watched this, it was a phenomenal insight into the workings and thoughts of a man and restaurant that I will probably never have a chance to visit or experience. And even though there are some people out there who think documentaries are boring. Well, that’s the thing about documentaries, they let you see a perspective of the world that you would never have seen otherwise.

Aside from the fact that it was a documentary about sushi and made my mouth water for the delectable sushi on the screen, it was quite an inspiration for me as an individual who is also looking to devote my time and energy to the right things in life. Throughout the documentary, the touch upon this term, shokunin, but never quite explained it fully.

Shokunin is translated to essentially be “artisan” or “craftsman.” While seemingly ordinary, the documentary portrayed the term to be more of an honorary title that is simply not given to any random person who happens to be an artisan or craftsman. Instead, it is more of a demonstration of extreme dedication to an art that has allowed you to transcend the ordinary and begin to step into the world of masters.

This whole notion of becoming a shokunin really struck me. After all, how many of us can say that we’ve committed even 10% of our energy and devotion to mastering a craft. Don’t get me wrong. I recognize that most of us know what it’s like to work hard. It’s just I can only really think of a few moments in my life where I may have pursued something the way that Jiro pursues his craft of making the best sushi in the world.

After watching Jiro Dreams of Sushi, I have decided to find aspects of my life that I would aspire to become a “shokunin” as much as I possibly can. As of right now, I have decided that I will focus on: user experience, go, and cultivation.

If you were to be a shokunin, what area of expertise would you choose?

Here on BreakingNorms, my number one goal is to provide an alternative opinion, a different perspective, a slightly new spin on something that we think we know so well. Today’s post is on something we all know how to define: poverty. The mindset of those who are poor however, is something completely different entirely.

I normally ask those who have time to go visit the blog post, but this time I implore you to visit his post.

These twelve (in no particular order) were perhaps the most eye-opening ones for me:

“Being poor is hoping your kids don’t have a growth spurt.”

“Being poor is thinking $8 an hour is a really good deal.”

“Being poor is relying on people who don’t give a damn about you.”

“Being poor is making lunch for your kid when a cockroach skitters over the bread, and you looking over to see if your kid saw.”

“Being poor is needing that 35-cent raise.”

“Being poor is six dollars short on the utility bill and no way to close the gap.”

“Being poor is crying when you drop the mac and cheese on the floor.”

“Being poor is going to the restroom before you get in the school lunch line so your friends will be ahead of you and won’t hear you say “I get free lunch” when you get to the cashier.”

“Being poor is picking the 10 cent ramen instead of the 12 cent ramen because that’s two extra packages for every dollar.”

“Being poor is a box of crayons and a $1 coloring book from a community center Santa.”

“Being poor is checking the coin return slot of every soda machine you go by.”

“Being poor is a $200 paycheck advance from a company that takes $250 when the paycheck comes in.”

I think we all forget how luxurious the word choice is. To be able to choose to do something different is a luxury that some simply do not have. It is not up to us to scorn them or judge them for the position they are in. To think that we are better because of a lucky break or being born in nurturing environment is a travesty and is a thought we should all do well to eliminate from our minds.

I hope that you’ll take a moment to really let this sink into your mind and carry it with you the rest of your life. We may not all have grown up with hardship, but we all should do well to treasure and appreciate everything we have because it would be a shame if we waited until it was too late to do so.

Finally, I leave you with his final statements, which in my opinion, stand alone as if it were a poem.

“Being poor is people who have never been poor wondering why you choose to be so.

Being poor is knowing how hard it is to stop being poor.

Being poor is seeing how few options you have.

Being poor is running in place.

Being poor is people wondering why you didn’t leave.”

What were some of the most eye-opening statements for you?

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/24/being-poor-whatever/feed/4hongb1It’s Time to Step Things Uphttps://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/17/its-time-to-step-things-up/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/17/its-time-to-step-things-up/#commentsMon, 17 Sep 2012 13:00:29 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=538]]>In conjunction with last week’s post on the illusion of busyness, I thought it only be appropriate that we talk about “stepping up our game.”

For those of you who do not have the time to read the post in its entirety, it is essentially a journal entry about how Runyon was sitting in a coffee shop working on his new Macbook Air when the the guy who invented the computer (Russel Kirsch) decides to bestow his time and wisdom to Runyon.

HOW COOL IS THAT?!

In their ensuing conversation, the following statements will forever stick out in my mind:

1. “I guess, I’ve always believed that nothing is withheld from us what we have conceived to do. Most people think the opposite – that all things are withheld from them which they have conceived to do and they end up doingnothing.”

In other words, as Runyon paraphrases quite nicely, “If you’ve conceived something in your mind, decide to do it, and are willing to put in the work – nothing can stop you.” Now there are clearly many exceptions to this statement, but why let personal or environmental obstacles serve to determine your reality? I’m not proposing that people be delusional, but stop with the excuses and get out there!

2. “Do things that have never been done before.”

I know that naysayers and Debbie-downers will always try to interject about things can’t be done, but isn’t what makes life so interesting the fact that we often have the opportunity to turn ideas only thought to exist in dreams into reality? Just as people do with the whole notion of busyness, we find that most often people’s usage of the verb “can’t” really should just be replaced with “won’t.” Because in reality, most things aren’t about capability, they are about the willingness to move forward regardless of the challenges that we are faced with.

So here’s to the improbable, and not the impossible!

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/17/its-time-to-step-things-up/feed/2stepuphongb1Think You’re “So Busy?” Think Again.https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/10/think-youre-so-busy-think-again/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/10/think-youre-so-busy-think-again/#commentsMon, 10 Sep 2012 13:00:21 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=540]]>“I’m so busy… I never have any time for myself… Relax? What is that?”

Sound familiar? I’m sure it does, because at some point we all have probably thought something along those lines.

In the article “The Busy Trap” by Tim Kreider, Kreider brings up some great points regarding the whole notion of “business” within our society.

#1. “The present hysteria is not a necessary or inevitable condition of life; it’s something we’ve chosen, if only by our acquiescence to it. “

Isn’t this quite the interesting notion? Most people would probably argue that society has “forced” us to be so busy. Yet, Kreider is completely on target with the fact that the only person to blame is ourselves, not society. Society have provide certain environmental guidelines, but history has shown us again and again that it is up to the individual to abide by the conditions around them.

#2. “Busyness serves as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness; obviously your life cannot possibly be silly or trivial or meaningless if you are so busy, completely booked, in demand every hour of the day.”

In The Shawshank Redemption, the famous quote from Tim Robbin’s character Andy Dufresne is: “Get busy living. Or get busy dying.” With our topic being about the whole notion of being “busy,” it’s kind of ironic that “busy” is the primary verb of the popular quote. Yet if we think about Kreider statement, it becomes apparent that many people do not realize that there are different types of busyness.

The type of busyness that Kreider focuses is on is the one that most people choose to occupy themselves with. It is generally full of noise and action, but very often there is nothing to show at the end of the day.

The type of busyness that Andy Dufresne talks about is one that is full of purpose where each action has an overarching goal behind it. This is the type of busyness that we should be occupying our time with, not the normal busyness we so often find ourselves spending time on.

#3. “The space and quiet that idleness provides is a necessary condition for standing back from life and seeing it whole, for making unexpected connections and waiting for the wild summer lightning strikes of inspiration — it is, paradoxically, necessary to getting any work done.”

Case and point. Sleep.

Even the most brilliant minds of our time require space and time away from their work. In fact, just as Euclid leapt out of his bathtub and went running naked down the streets when he discovered a new physical law, these times of peace and quietness are often where a good deal of our inspiration and innovation comes from.

In the end, do you want to recall your life as one gigantic blur of actions? Does it not strike you as odd that we work so hard for a “successful” career in hopes that we can “one day” actually “live” our life? I think the Dalai Lama summed it up the best when asked what surprised him most about humanity:

“Man. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.”

The word “life” is akin to the word “live.” So why not live your life with a purpose that transcends the whole notion of being “so busy.”

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/09/10/think-youre-so-busy-think-again/feed/6Anxietyhongb1The Best Solutions in Lifehttps://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/31/the-best-solutions-in-life/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/31/the-best-solutions-in-life/#commentsFri, 31 Aug 2012 15:37:14 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=510]]>In anticipation of Labor Day Weekend, I’ve decided to release the post early since I’m sure everyone will be off having fun on Monday. So, to kick everything off, I hope you’ll take five minutes to watch the following speech from Kenneth Cole – “The Birth of a Shoe Company.” This lecture is different from the typical TED Talks in that it is only a few minutes long and is an anecdote about how Kenneth Cole created a successful company amidst a recession.

If I were to select the single most memorable moment in the entire lecture, it is the following statement:

“Invariably, we remind ourselves that the best solutions are not the most expensive but are the most creative.” – Kenneth Cole

Although it seem incredibly obvious, it still blew my mind as to how simple and true his statement was. Yet, when I looked at myself and the others around me, I couldn’t help but wonder why so many of us seem to purposely avoid the creative solutions.

Let’s take the following example:

In the pursuit of the idea of entrepreneurship, I thought that it might be a good idea for me to get an understanding of marketing. After all, how can I make a successful business without an understanding of marketing? So with that in mind, I immediately hit Amazon to find all the best books in marketing I could find. Before I knew it, I had about $100 in books that I was ready to order. Then, on top of that, some of the books mentioned some brilliant marketers who were selling courses online. Next thing I know, I’m waist deep in online course material from people who’ve “made it big” and created “viral online products” that “generated thousands of dollars in passive income.”

If we take a step back, I’m sure it doesn’t take a scientist to notice that my immediate approach at the solution was to spend money. Perhaps it is because that in my mind I equate spending money on something with obtaining something of value. To some extent, it’s not completely invalid. For instance, by purchasing a credible and informative book on marketing, I will have obtained the value of marketing knowledge in the form of a book.

Here’s where the problem occurs:

A. Most people who buy the book feel satisfied in simply buying the book, and the next thing they know the book is collecting dust on the bookshelf.

B. The 10% of people who actually read what they buy will then decide they need more knowledge and go purchase more books or even enroll in a some seminar or class.

C. The cycle repeats itself and no one gets to where they originally intended: obtaining the skill of marketing.

While there are some people who go through Situation B and actually obtain something of worth, let’s be realistic with ourselves in knowing we are not that 0.01%.

So the question is how we avoid these types of common pitfalls.

#1. When approached with a problem or goal, your first solution should NEVER be to spend money.

#2. Once you’ve suppressed the impulse to spend money, do your research online. Let’s not forget everyone, the chances are extremely high that someone else has already encountered your problem and posted about it online. So why don’t we just take a minute or so to see what the vast internet has for us?

#3. If it seems that you need to purchase something, make sure you’re well aware of what you already have and see if you can re-purpose anything you have instead of spending more money.

#4. Roll your sleeves up and dive right into the problem. Don’t make excuses for why something can’t done. Just take action and by doing so you will progress forward.

At first it may be a little difficult to be creative with what you have and make clever use of your time and energy, but the great thing about starting this process is that it will get easier and easier over time. And before you know it, you’ll be coming up with things that seem common-sense to you; but brilliant in the eyes of those around you.

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/31/the-best-solutions-in-life/feed/2hongb1Happiness: Elusive or Illusive?https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/06/happiness-elusive-or-illusive/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/06/happiness-elusive-or-illusive/#commentsMon, 06 Aug 2012 13:00:07 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=515]]>Happiness. It is a simple concept that every person would say they are familiar with and could explain to another person. Yet, in actuality, how many of us truly understand what the meaning of happiness really is? After all, is being happy simply a chemical reaction of feeling elated? If so, would one readily agree that putting everyone in a drug induced state be the equivalent of making everyone happy?

In “Don’t Indulge. Be Happy.,” Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton approach the whole notion of happiness from the idea that happiness is connected with money. They even bring up an interesting notion regarding how $75,000 is considered to be a comfortable salary. In many regards, I’m sure most of you would agree with that sentiment. After all, it’s difficult for most people to envision a “happy life” where they did not have the means to support themselves or buy the things they wanted.

Yet in reality, money ends up being a short term goal that society has informed us to chase like dogs on a racetrack. We are told that we should focus on getting “high paying jobs” so we can “afford” things that we want. In addition, we are told that we “need” to make a certain salary to survive in this world. After all, isn’t that why we all went to school? For the opportunity of making more money?

Although it can be a fantastic distraction that can serve as a motivator for some, the sole pursuit of the acquisition of money always ends in an empty life. And unless you have any evidence to the contrary, my research and experience in life has taught me that there is no lasting happiness to be found in money.

So we know that drug-induced highs and money isn’t what happiness is, but where does that leave us? Family? Friends? Career? Power? Politics? Self-actualization? Love?

After a great deal of thought and soul searching, I’ve been thinking that maybe there is no such thing as happiness.

Think about it. Happiness is entirely relative is it not? Let’s take the following example:

You and your team have just finished a big project for your company that you are really proud of. The next day, your boss comes into your office and congratulates you on a job well done and hands you a $50,000 check for doing such a great job.

I’m pretty sure most people would describe their current feeling as “happy” no? After all, there are some people who’s annual salary is that much!

Now ten minutes later, your fellow teammate comes in to inform you that the boss stopped by his office as well and gave him a $60,000 bonus check.

Wait a minute… that so called “happiness” probably faltered for a moment there didn’t it? In fact, if you are like most people, you may even have felt the completely reverse emotion. I mean after all, what did your teammate do that made him earn $10,000 more than you? Aren’t you worth it?

Within that short time frame, the thing so many call “happiness” becomes “jealousy” and even “anger” or “hatred.”

Curious no?

In that case, perhaps it’s just that society’s portrayal of happiness is an entirely empty notion. And with that in mind, the conclusion I’ve managed to draw from my own experiences is the following:

True happiness is the ability to appreciate the present moment regardless of the conditions around us.

I know that this may seem downright crazy, but this is one concept that many people fail to grasp their entire lives. They spend all this time and energy trying to pursue this notion of happiness that society has defined to only end up never really getting to truly enjoy their lives. Think about it: perspective is everything. What seems amazing in one respect can be completely awful from a different perspective. Being able to grasp this can make all the difference in your life.

Orson Welles once said, “If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story.” Remember that no matter what tragic event has befallen you, it is not the end of your story. There is no telling when your story will end, but you would be selling yourself short if you were to choose your story to live out as a tragedy.

The time you have now is the best opportunity of all. There is no guarantee of tomorrow, and there is no way to change the past. The present is the only time you have complete control over, so stop letting that time pass you by any longer. After all, the grass isn’t greener on the other side. It’s greener where you water it.

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/08/06/happiness-elusive-or-illusive/feed/8hongb1Why You Will Fail to Have a Great Career – TED Talkhttps://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/07/16/why-you-will-fail-to-have-a-great-career-ted-talk/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/07/16/why-you-will-fail-to-have-a-great-career-ted-talk/#respondMon, 16 Jul 2012 13:00:11 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=432]]>TED Talk Series is now making its comeback to my regular monthly schedule! For those who have yet to realize the amazing knowledge and perspective that can be gained from this amazing series, keep an open mind and prepared to enrich your mind!

As we return to the whole concept of the job hunt, it’s really important to wonder whether or not the beliefs passed onto you by the educational institution are really worth anything. After all, we are told that we will go on to have great careers; but what does that really mean?

Today’s TED Talk is given by Larry Smith on “Why You Will Fail to Have a Great Career.” If you are even remotely thinking that you want to have a great career, trust me when I say this is worth your time.

For those who still seem to need some convincing, here are some highlights. I won’t elaborate, because I really do want you guys to watch it to get the full effect; but here are some of my favorite moments.

Attempting to reassure yourself by telling the world that you are “competent” is nothing more than damning yourself into oblivion.

There is a fine line between crazy and genius.

Some people believe, “If I work hard, I’ll have a good career. Therefore, if I work really really hard, then I should have a great career.” Don’t worry. The world will give you plenty of opportunities to work really really hard, but who gave you the crazy notion that equaled a great career?

Passion and interest are two very different things. After all, who says, “Marry me darling! You’re interesting!!” I assure you it won’t happen and you’ll die alone.

“If only I had…” is the last phrase you want echoing through your head once your life has passed you by.

I hope that these five points were interesting enough that it has peaked your interest to watch the TED Talk. And in case you’re thinking that my highlights are good enough, there is an anecdote he posits at the end of the lecture that stopped me dead in my tracks. It certainly helped spur me forward with my life, and I have a feeling it will help motivate you too.

So again, please check it out and let me know what you thought of it below!

]]>https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/07/16/why-you-will-fail-to-have-a-great-career-ted-talk/feed/0hongb1The Foundation for Any Promotionhttps://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/07/09/the-foundation-for-any-promotion/
https://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/2012/07/09/the-foundation-for-any-promotion/#commentsMon, 09 Jul 2012 08:00:45 +0000http://breakingnorms.wordpress.com/?p=491]]>Today’s post is inspired by @Passenger00 for her suggestion to discuss a critical aspect to people who have jobs: Promotions.

Let’s face it, I don’t think there’s a single in this universe employed person who wouldn’t be psyched at the idea of getting a raise. I know I know… didn’t I just say that we’d be talking about promotions? Well, for the majority of people, they are only interested in promotions because it comes with the notion of being paid more. The types of people who acquiring more responsibility for their own personal fulfillment tend to do so on their own, so we won’t talk about that group for today.

Before we jump into understanding the foundation for getting any promotion, it’s important to keep the following caveats in mind:

Organization’s Financial Standing – Let’s face it. Even though you are the best of the best in the organization, if their profit margins can’t support the salary you’re looking for, you better not hold your breath in anticipation.

Career Earning Potential – On the flip side of the coin, if the career path you’re getting into has known salary range of $30k to $70k, I wouldn’t sit idly in my ivory tower waiting for my charming supervisor to come rushing over with a grandiose salary of $100+k.

Your Organization’s Earning Potential – Sandwiched in-between caveats 1 and 2 is the fact that the salary of the people you work with would be a VERY good indicator of what you could potentially stand to make. It doesn’t matter that your career has an average starting salary of $80k a year. Because if the organization you chose to work for only pays entry level people $50k and your supervisor only makes $80k, fat chance getting that six figure salary.

Disclaimer: As with just about anything in life, there is an exception to every rule. These caveats are no exception to that. Read on to find out the single exception to these caveats.

That being said, the #1 thing that you have to understand when it comes to getting a promotion is that it is all based on one single factor: the value you provide to the organization.

Now many of you will retort that with other aspects that come into play, such as trust, reliability, and so forth; but I would argue that a person who truly provides a solid value to the company that is recognized by his/her peers and supervisors inevitably has all those other traits. After all, I would say that it would be difficult for you to be valuable to the company if they had a hard time trusting you to get your work done on time or doing you work well.

So the question ends up being: How do I provide value to my company that will increase my chances of getting a promotion?

1. Bring in new business

That’s right. Sales… revenue… profit… donations… endowments… in the end, it all boils down to new money.

Let’s remind ourselves what the ultimate purpose of 99.999% of every organization is: avoiding going in the red(i.e. avoid debt). (I know most you probably thought I was going to say something along the lines of “make money,” but I’ve already thought of the non-profit rebuttal and thus you lose your chance to be a smarty pants. Muahaha.)

For those of you smarty pants, you probably also suspected that this is the ONE exception to the caveats I posed above. After all, if you can bring in new business and increase your organization’s profitability, you can be damn sure they are going to pay you well. And here’s the thing, if they don’t, someone else DEFINITELY will. If you can bring in new clients, customers, donations, you will not only be one of the most valued people in your organization, but chances are you will also be one of the most well paid as well.

But in all honesty, so sales is something that doesn’t jive well with most of us. And let’s face it, if that was one of our stronger suits, we’d already be in sales. So since #1 won’t work for most of us, let’s start with the next best thing you can do to get a promotion.

2. Be present in your organization.

This sounds REALLY simple, but I assure you that MOST people fail to do this. Because ultimately, being present in your organization is far more than just showing up to work and getting your work done on time. This is about being engaged with the people and culture that constitute your organization.

Remember the following, unless your organization is completely backwards and likes Mr./Ms. Outside Hire for higher level positions (in which case I’d suggest you leave as soon as you can because you’re never going anywhere), the people who will end up recommending you for your promotion will ALWAYS come from within.

Invest time in your co-workers, supervisor, clients, and just about anyone else you encounter at work. Each genuine and well-executed decision will serve as another building block to your recognition and eventual promotion/raise. After all, it takes nothing more than an ecstatic customer who sends a letter of gratitude to your supervisor for you to be put on the radar for that next position.

So go out to happy hour, eat out with your co-workers when you can, and enjoy your work environment as much as you can. After all, we spend 40+ hours a week there, so why not invest some time and money in making it a place that’s enjoyable?

Also, while these are all great things to do while at your job, these are things I would recommend avoiding:

Working from home for a majority of the time – Yes. I know. Working at home can be awesome and relaxing, but I assure you, just as quickly as you forget about the office and stop worrying about people looking over your shoulder as you fire up the TV as you sit on your laptop, the people at the office will also forget about your existence as well. I don’t think it takes a genius to see how this might be disadvantageous to you if a promotion/raise is something you’re gunning for.

Being a kiss ass – While some people enjoy having someone kiss their ass, this is a high-risk approach that will most likely leave a nasty impression on the people around you. Being kind and genuine is one thing, but the moment people start noticing that you’re fake and insincere, you are going to have one hell of a time digging yourself out of it. And a great work environment is about trust and mutual respect, not about selfish people out for their own benefit.

Remember that every relationship you invest in will only serve to benefit you in the future. This could range from letters of recommendations, networks into future employment, possible entrepreneurial ventures, and so forth. So don’t forget that being genuine and honest will not only serve you well in your career growth, but many other aspects of your life as well.

3. Be crazy productive at your job.

In all honesty, I wanted to leave this one off the list. Unfortunately, I cannot deny the fact that a lot people do get promoted based on this very fact. So here we go…

To start, let me clarify that being good at what you do and being crazy productive are two different things. Being good at your job is the prerequisite to any kind of promotion, but just being crazy productive at your job is one of the worst ways to get a promotion. Before you go off, disagreeing with me though. Hear me out.

The logic for this fundamental is as follows: Produce a lot for the company, therefore you are valuable to the company.

From a simpleton’s perspective, it makes perfect sense. If you consider the complexities of well, life in general, it actually exposes you to a huge threat. What is that threat? It is the threat that you will work tirelessly to be the most productive employee in your organization and only end up with a plaque at the end of the year that says “Employee of the Year.” I don’t know about you; but to me, that kind of recognition is another way of saying, “We thought about paying you more, but we’ve decided that all we can afford is this plaque and some cheese/veggie/cookie trays. Good job kiddo!”

I’m not trying to discredit the fact that it is important to be recognized and that being “Employee of the Year” wouldn’t be an achievement. It is a big deal and is something to be celebrated; but let’s not lose our focus here, you want a promotion/raise. I know that some people will argue that it is a step forward in being recognized and an eventual promotion, but I think that people in modern society are trying to live their lives more efficiently.

That may sound weird to you at first, but think about it. Who in their right mind would want to wait five years for a promotion? Even if you were to say you’d get one in three years, let me remind you would have spent those three years toiling away at your desk and not living it at all. If this recent recession and job scare has taught you anything, it should be that layoffs don’t discriminate between anyone. After all, why pay one person a lot of money when you can just lay him off and make lower paid workers simply do more or just outsource? With the exception of sales, whether you like it or not, you can be replaced. And in a time like now, your “productivity” can be replaced for a much lower price tag.

We’re part of a new generation that is realizing that ideals such as “work-life balance” are things that are actually achievable if we give it the effort it deserves. So why follow an old model of career promotions? I can tell you for certain that I will not be waiting around for someone to hand me a promotion because I’ve been super obedient and give up the one resource I can never get back.

In the end, if you are still going to insist on using this route, then let me ask that you revise your approach to the following:

4. Be one of the best in your field.

I know that sounds really ambitious and can be very vague for a lot of people, but believe me when I say that this is a far better path than being “crazy productive.”

The reason for this is because it is precisely this kind of drive and ambition that open doors of opportunity for people. When you aim to be one of the best in your field, you are talking about one of the most prized traits that people try to systematically create but can’t: innovation.

I hate to leave this approach with such a short description; but that’s the thing about innovation and drive, there are no formulas that will guarantee your success. I will say that based on a person’s personality, circumstances, and skills, I could craft a guideline for him/her. But as far as generic advice goes, I can only recommend that you read more about the concepts of creativity and innovation. And if you need role models to remind you of the great things you can do, I recommend reading more books about entrepreneurs and the amazing things that they are doing.

In summary, most of you will be utilizing a combination of the approaches above. If I were to recommend a single approach to work on however, it would definitely be #2. The thing you have to realize is that ultimately, promotion or not, people want to live their life as fully as they possibly can. After all, there is no guarantee that any of these methods will result in a promotion. If I were to promise you anything though, it’s that growing your social skills, ability to be genuine, and being engaged in your life will be an inspiration and joy for the people around you to see. And if I’ve learned anything from my own experiences and the people I know, it’s that the people around you are what really make your life worth living.