Read some thoughts, poems, song lyrics, quotes and other meaningful things from a lady who thinks too much, lives each day sitting in a wheelchair, feels deeply, and enjoys life, especially orange coloured objects, music, tea, laughing, and hanging out with the cool folk.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

How She Move...

Last night I went to a women's movie night. Before arriving, my head pounded from lack of caffeine. I ordered a Tim Hortons coffee with a shot of gingerbread that hit the spot. A sweet man with a Scottish accent opened the door for me. When I arrived, my nose was runny, but so were other noses. We watched a film called How She Move. It was filmed locally and focused on a youth struggling to be successful in an at risk neighbourhood. How She Move won at the Sundance Film Festival. I thought it was OK.I went to the ladies' room, so I missed some of the movie, but I wasn't really too upset. The attendant who helped me was sweet. I think I did a poor job of directing her on how to transfer me. She didn't complain.The highlight of the night for me was the conversation over dinner and after the film. When a bunch of women are in a room, there is bound to be lots of talking. I sat beside Jillian, an acquaintance from school. She's chatty. There is a bright girl who always attends movie nights named Laura. Though she can't talk, Laura communicates well. It's obvious that Laura is very bright. I wish I had more time to talk to her. Since the night was geared for women with disabilities, the focus turned to how our movement differs from the majority of women. We agreed that everyone needs to move, even a little. Each of us may move differently, but it's a human need to crave motion.

Once home, I got a vanilla ribos tea from Starbucks. It's the first time I've gone into Starbucks and had tea. Surprisingly, I loved it. There was lots of talking in Starbucks. Friday nights are always busy. Sitting right next to the door, I kept catching a draft. A little coldness didn't spoil my tea. Today I feel too big. I ate pita and hummus with salad last night. Tonight I have another big meal. I'm looking forward to seeing my friend, even if it will involve dinner. I'm struggling to accept gaining weight. Every day I feel so fat. Will someone ever tell me if I get too big? Personally, I feel as though I reached that point long ago. Why can't I stop obsessing over food? Last night I said movement represents living. Though I feel too big, I'm keeping busy, which is good. Being busy has nothing to do with my size. Actually, very few matters of significance in life relate to size. Maybe size ought not matter to me so much....- OCG