I’m still buzzing from my book signing earlier this month. Eight years in the making, it was an occasion worthy of celebrating. It was a birth - the birth of a book and the birth of its author. A grand transition from inner to outer worlds. (See my book page to order)

A twinge in my throatIn my presentation, I shared how the story began as a twinge in my throat. When I got still enough, I could feel it. When I got quiet enough, I could hear it. It was the nudge of my inner voice wanting to speak. The voice of my story wanting to be told. Through the encouragement of a trusted supporter, I took pen to page and started writing.

In seed formMy story is about a lost pregnancy. As I wrote, I began to see that while the physical part of pregnancy was lost for me, there was an energy that remained: an energy held in trust, like a seed. A seed filled with love, hope, and potential. A seed that didn’t sprout in the garden I thought it would, but a seed nonetheless. Seeds are full of possibility. Seeds are a creative force. And we get to choose where we plant them. I eventually came to realize the seed held the wish, desire, and dream to create. As I looked at the fallout from my loss, a declaration I made as a nine-year old was still there, burning in my ears:

When I grow up, I want to be a writer. I want to write stories about my life.

A potent positionLoss put that declaration in a whole new perspective. This is when I discovered a side benefit of having my heart cracked open: courage. I began to ask myself, what do I have to lose?

That’s a potent position to be in, as it turns out. There’s a special determination that arises when all appears to be lost. If we don’t give in to the temptation of victimhood, we can use this energy as medicine. We can bottle it up by creating something, by taking action – no matter how small – to make meaning out of that pain.

Have you seen the movie Birdman? It’s a fascinating portrayal of the relationship between and artist and his inner critic. The main character, a former movie superhero, takes a big risk by trying his hand at live theatre on the biggest stage – Broadway. Naturally, this state of vulnerability escalates his self-doubt.

It’s no wonder the move resonated (it won the Oscar for Best Picture). Creativity brings up our vulnerabilities. The inner critic is a voice we all contend with, whether we are starting a new business, sharing a piece of writing, trying a new class, or promoting our next workshop or gallery show.

I'm experiencing this now, as I prepare for my book release event in 5 days. My default tendencies to stay invisible are leading me to daydream about hiding in the bathroom for the duration of the event. "Who do you think you are?" rings in my ear. My stomach hurts.

As a creativity coach, I help people move through their fears by taking small steps. Why small steps? It has been proven that lowering pressure opens the mind to increased creativity, productivity, and joy in the present moment. What would happen if I took small steps in my own situation?

In a workshop I recently led entitled “Calling out the Critic,” we followed a powerful process to show our critic the door. Here are three small steps we can use to step out of our fear and into our power.

EXPRESS. What does your critic have to say? What (or who) does it look like? Give it a few minutes to express its urgent message. There are several ways to do this. Cut and paste images and words from magazines. Write a letter in your journal from the perspective of your critic. Read it out loud. Sing it. There’s no need to get hung up on the way you do this. The key is to simply BECOME AWARE of the messages, get them out of your head, and on to the page.

DETACH. Take a deep breath. Realize the messages of the inner critic are not the truth. They are not you. These messages are fear-based. And it’s totally NORMAL to have them. They come from our ego, whose main job is to protect us from saber-toothed tigers. Really. These messages are generated from the amygdala, the part of the brain that is wired for survival. The strange thing about the amygdala is this: it doesn’t realize we are no longer cave people. It’s an evolutionary holdover. Bring yourself to present time and disengage from the panic button.

SUMMONyourInner Ally. Tap into your strength and determination. Deep down, you know it’s there. Remember that time you survived speaking in public? Remember the last crisis you came through? Traveled alone? Walked through the house alone in the dark when the power was out? Your Inner Ally helped you do these things. Draw a shield on a piece of paper. Use the Grace Card image I posted with this blog for inspiration. Write a "comeback" from your Ally to your Critic, such as:

“Why not me?”

or

“Through fear I find courage.”

Take your shield and place it over the messages of your critic. Choose to believe your ally 5% more. Remember, there is power in choice.

With practice, you’ll find the amount of time between these steps decreases. And that’s where freedom and power come in. As we step away from our critic, we step into our power.

What are some messages your critic says to you? What might work for you as a “comeback” response? Give it a try. Please share your comments below. Step back into your creative power. Your ally has your back.

Kim Evans,Author and Branding Consultant​​I am passionate about helping women write their truth and share their message. I offer personalized coaching programs designed to help soulful entrepreneurs tap their inner wisdom, write the stories they need to tell, and build a business they love.