Monday, December 21, 2009

We are having a son. His name is Joshua Robert, and for the most part, we don't ever call him the baby anymore--we refer to him as Joshua. We had originally discussed whether or not to find out the gender, but in the end, decided we wanted to. For me, at least, it's easier to bond with a baby that I can call by name.

I have no idea about little boys, and I have no idea how to raise one to be a man.

But what I want, baby Joshua, is for you to grow up strong, and brave, and compassionate. I want courage, and sacrifice, and honor, and loyalty, and duty to be far more than just words to you; I want them to be concepts that define you. I want you to help little old ladies get safely across the street. I want you to never start a fight, but to know that some things are worth fighting for. For those things, for those fights, I don't want you to start them, but I always want you to step in and finish them. I want you to know when to be tough, and I want you to know when you to be gentle. And I want you to know that real men are loving, kind, and do not feel that they need to belittle or harm others in order to be strong. And you should also know that, as your mother, I will never tolerate you hurting someone else. I want you to know that there are still heroes in this world, there are still those who serve others selflessly. I want you to grow up to be a hero.

I want you to be someone who runs in when the whole world is running out. I want you to be someone who is kind when it is easier to be mean.I want you to be someone who is compassionate and loving towards those who don't deserve it.I want you to work hard, even when you are tired, and it is cold and uncomfortable.I want you to always finish what you start, and always be truthful, and do what you say you will do.

You are fortunate. Not all little boys have what you have. You have a strong, brave, loving and gentle father to look up too. You have a daddy who does not just speak of courage, and honor, and selflessness, but lives them every day. And more than anything else, little Joshua, your mommy and your daddy already love you so very much.

I am a wife, a mom, and a part-time paramedic living in upstate New York right in the fingerlaks region. Life as a paramedic-mom sometimes leaves me joyous, sometimes breathless, and sometimes very paranoid. You're welcome to follow me on this journey as I navigate through finding balance in all things and celebrate the beautiful family God has given me.