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3/28/2013

I've got a lovely little record player. I bought it at a fantastic antique store over spring break. It's a tiny blue suitcase made from some sort of pasteboard material. I smiled so hard the first time I played my record of big band hits from the thirties. It's one of those things that just does make you smile . . . Bing Crosby, Peter Paul and Mary, the little record player itself, the square record covers, and the crackly-whispery sound it makes when you set the needle down . . . It takes music to a new level of happy.

3/19/2013

A huge, scrumptious stack of library books
English breakfast tea for . . . breakfast
Chocolate cream cheese swirl cookies
Parents celebrating the day she's been married to him for half of her life
The smells and sounds of spring beginning
Piper's grin when she knows I'm proud of her
The colorful dresses in my closet, waiting for warm weather
The thought of going barefoot soon
Jason's insane giggle when all four of us watch movies together
Seeing a tiny version of Piper while we were walking . . . baby german shepherd!
The memory of Piper's huge puppy ears and crazy long tail
Small blue record player (Waiting to get a new needle in the mail)
Plans for summer break
Collecting vintage magazines for my wall collage
Big, colorful earrings
Conversations with you. Your comments make me smile.05 Benedictus Simon & Garfunkel Wednesday Morning, 3 AM [Expanded] Rock 64kbps by Simon & Garfunkel on Grooveshark

3/18/2013

I am not a germ freak. I forget to wash my hands at the appropriate times. Public restroomsdon't faze me (although there are definitely exceptions) and I would totally eat a skittle that's been under a couch cushion for three months. Especially a green one.

I am not gushy. I know how to say "Ooh, that's lovely!" or "That's awesome, I love it!" But when everyone starts in with the "AWWWW. <333333 LOVELOVELOVE" I start looking for a place to hide. Gushiness is awkward for me. Might be the fact that I was born into a male-dominated family . . . three brothers, eight uncles, no sisters or girl cousins . . . yep, that could do it.

I am not self-disciplined. I don't finish projects. I procrastinate. I take "little" breaks when I should be hard at work. I'm not very stern with myself. It's something I have to work on. And I have to work on working on it. And work on working on working . . . you get the idea. It's a little depressing.

I am not insecure. I don't usually believe that I'm beautiful and amazing, but I don't usually believe that I'm not beautiful and amazing either. Does that make any sense at all? I have quite a lot of insecure moments, but they don't last long. Deep down, I'm pretty well grounded in knowing who I am and being okay with who I am. That's something I like about myself.

I am not a fangirl. I feel weird about confessing this, because I'm such a minority. I have my favorite movies and shows but I don't really give a crap about celebrities. Fandoms bewilder me and so do celebrity crushes. In short, I fail miserably at being a teenaged girl.

I am not a highschooler. This also leaves me in a tiny minority (for my age group, of course). I graduated several years early and I'm in college now. It's just . . . extremely awkward in real life. I dread the question "What grade are you in?"

I am not someone who sees life in black-and-white. I see life in bright colors. Dogmatism makes me furious. I like questions better than definite statements. My brain is quick to think, "Yes, but what if . . .?"

I am not good at taking beautiful self-portraits. Just stating the obvious.

3/07/2013

This is the week before spring break. I've finished all three of my midterms. I just have to write a speech. Boo. It's going to be about banned books, and it will be fun. But my enthusiasm waned slightly when I was told that I had to follow a specific type of outline. Phooey. I feel quite capable of making my own outline. Also, we have to cite sources. Five of them. In seven minutes. Ewww.

The . . . ahem . . . photograph of sorts that you see above is my midterm for Computer Art. It's a cross between Peter Pan, Mary Poppins, and my own imagination. I wish that all four of us could really fly away and have an adventure over spring break. We would make good book characters, I think. After all, there are four of us. Four seems to be the perfect number of siblings for an adventure. Think Pevensies.

Drawing class has been a bit depressing. I've never drawn before, so I'm not good at it. Do you know how hard it is to not be good at something you ought to be good at? It leaves me feeling very un-artistic. Which is a huge bummer, because I generally think of myself as a creative/artistic person. I'm glad to be in Computer Art and Web Page Design, because I am good at those classes and it helps me prop my ego up again. I always view things that boost my ego as good things. I don't think it's because I'm prideful or sensitive. I just had a very small, crushable ego during my childhood and early teens, so I've tried to be very nice to it as I grow older. I think that being nice to yourself is an excellent practice, as long as you don't take it too far.

Tomorrow is Ben's eleventh birthday, and I am going to make him a fabulous chocolate layer cake. Perhaps I shall blog a little during spring break, and perhaps I won't. I just thought that I would pop in and ramble a bit about school and classes.