I geht up 2 hours before I leave I hate having to stress in the morning

I need to hit the ground running, or else anxiety takes over and I talk myself out of doing what needs to be done.

Supposed to be having drinks/catching up with a friend tonight. Starting half an hour ago. Still waiting.

__________________Ella: 3 year old female ferretNacho: ~8 year old male ferretApollo: 5 year old male ferretSummer: 5 year old female ferretGoodbye, Rosey. You were the best girl I could have asked for. 10/15/96-03/08/13

I have tried to contact the local AKC kennel club for three years. THREE YEARS. I've sent emails and made phone calls. I cannot get a hold of ANYBODY. All I want to do is get Logan signed up for handling classes, which start Tuesday. If they're full, that's fine, but PLEASE TELL ME THAT. Ugh. THREE YEARS!!! And it's not like I can just go elsewhere for handling classes, because nobody else offers AKC handling classes, just UKC, and the UKC ones are geared towards GSDs.

My dad just called me to tell me that my grandma who is in hospice care right now might not make it past this weekend. This woman helped raise me and is such a huge part of my life and I'm just miserable at the idea of her being gone forever. She hasn't really been able to talk much for about a year now... Advanced stages of alzheimers... But ya... The worst part is when she is gone I won't be able to even go to her funeral because she is all the way out in California.

My hose is running O.o but the tap is off. I went to let Rose out and heard it, so I checked and sure enough there is water coming out (how, I don't know, should be frozen) so I went to check the tap and it's off.

__________________Ella: 3 year old female ferretNacho: ~8 year old male ferretApollo: 5 year old male ferretSummer: 5 year old female ferretGoodbye, Rosey. You were the best girl I could have asked for. 10/15/96-03/08/13

Someone shoot me. Please just shoot me.
What I thought was a sinus infection that started Thursday morning is not a sinus infection, or it could be but if it is then this is the worse one in history.
Sore, swollen, burning sensation in my throat. Runny nose. Terrible pressure on my nose. My eyes are burning. Headaches so bad they'll put the worse migraine to shame. My neck hurts. Upset stomach. Can't breath or sleep or taste anything but tomato juice and apple juice. And my hand/eye/feet coordination is so bad that I've dropped my phone 4 times while typing this. No medicine is helping. Not nyquil, sudafed, Advil sinus and cold congestion relief, hell not even a shot of whiskey with honey in it helped.
Its after 6am. I've been up for 4 hrs after only sleeping for 3.5 hrs.
I think Emilio is gonna have to take me to the doctor tomorrow (well today) and that saddens me cause we were suppose to have dinner at my favorite habichi restaurant.

Dog people infuriate me! I just want to do agility with somebody who pretends to care or, at the very least, is NICE. I would like to make friends and more dog connections, but it's not mandatory.

Just finished 6 week class at a place sounded ok. The people in the class were pet people, not serious about dogs or agility, which is fine, it was an intro class. But the high and mighty instructions are just annoying. And all they care about is making money to pay the building rent so they're able to train their own dogs. Which is fine, but if I'm paying you an absurd amount of money for a 6 week class, I do expect some sort of interaction and TRAINING.

I contacted another less local club where I know the instructor and some of the people who train with her and had high hopes. A couple weeks go by without an email response (which is their preferred way of contact) so I called today and got a really rude response. Instead of being nice and asking the obstacles and things my dog has had experience with, they assumed we aren't ready. Which we probably aren't where we need to be for a novice handling class --- but there's no need to be rude and condescending or assuming. Or tell me which class I should be signing up for!

I'm home alone tonight and all night. I hate being home along. It gives me anxiety and I can't sleep. SO is at his parents and I don't want to make him come home... A friend was supposed to stay her for tonight, so he was going to visit his parents. This is the first time in a long time I've spent a night alone. On nights like this Id like my one room apartment back. I didn't have any anxiety there because I could see everywhere. Now... our apartment is big.

__________________

You are the whisper in the wind, and the silence in dark.
You are the autumn rain, and the spring flowers.
You are the joy when I laugh, and the sorrow when I cry.
You are the earth beneath my feet, and the air in the skyBut most of all, you are my heart. Run free, Beautiful Girl.