Since it's so much fun, I'm going to start my own little thang. Nothing complicated or in-depth, just some random thoughts which run through my head while watching each week. So...

Bongo's RAW Bits 9/2/02

- Has every RAW in that last month started with a Bischoff promo?- With two or three guys chasing the champ at all times, hasn't the Undisputed title ALWAYS been rather disputed?- Is Trip supposed to be a face or a heel? These crowds lately, man...- There's something weird about two world titles in one promotion. Does this devalue Brock Lesnar's position or strengthen RAW's?- Christ, at least have a match before you give the title away. Lame.- A title tourney would've been so cool, too. Lame x2.- Another intergender tag for Molly? How many of these have we seen now?- Speaking of Molly, I guess the Women's title is the only floater left. If they're trying to seperate the two brands even more, I wonder if they'll kill it or create a second.- Do Bubba's glasses even have lenses?- Is it just me, or is Trip's face starting to look like Vince's?- Trish has the absolute worst music in the WWE.- Okay, Mr. Nowinski, we get it. YOU DON'T NEED TO EXPLAIN YOUR OWN JOKE.- Ugh, someone shut up King. Please.- Trish and Bubba sure seem... comfortable together... hehehe...- Lance does make some pretty valid points. But the flag burning thing has been done.- I love Bischoff's way of totally overblowing matches which will likely suck.- Terri looks old and wrinkly.- King. Shut up.- I hope they either turn Jericho or have him lead the UnAmericans. They're not getting his character anywhere this way.- Monkey Ball! I need a freakin' Gamecube.- How long does it take to walk down a damned ramp?- Rosie and Jamal should attack Big Show every week.- Family member, hmm...- I love the UnAmerican's music for some reason.- Why does Show need to earn his title shot, when Trip was AWARDED the title without so much as a match? Oh well, the quirky logic is acceptable if it'll keep Show as far away from the main event scene as possible.- Note to King: Handicap rules mean double teams ARE allowed, despite the odd "one on tag" style.- Bradshaw? Who cares? Oh, he's a HOSS! Nevermind then.- Even Show's rap theme from the ill-fated Aggression album would be better than his old current music.- Show has ZERO heat. I swear I heard someone cough back there.- Dreamer is awesome.- Do all those steroids make Trip's nipples that hard all the time, or is it just really cold in there?- Does Jeff bathe?- Is this Heat? What is Crash doing out here?- Oh. Heh. Funny. Even the rats try to get off when the ship is sinking, I suppose.- How much crack would have to be consumed to come up with Five Alive commercials?- I hate Stacy's music.- Of course there's a convienently placed metal alarm clock. Suuuure.- Tar and feathers! I NEVER thought I would actually see that.- Speaking of bad music, RVD could really use a better remix.- Odd timing for a Rocky Sucks chant.- Wow, the Lionsault actually connected for once.

Caped Boy: Excuse me, ladies. You may remember me as the guy who came to dinner a few weeks ago with underwear on my head. My name is Keith Stat from Milbourne, New Jersey. State bird, the mosquito. And as you may have heard I am recently a crowned class B dungeon-master. So if any of you would like to play D&D today, please speak now or forever hold your peace. [He chuckles, and there is an awkward silence at the table.] Caped Boy: Anyone? Alexa! [Alexa gives him a withering glare.] Caped Boy: Maybe you would like to join in? We do need a druid, and you have definitely cast a level 5 charm spell on me. Alexa: In your dreams, douche-bag! Caped Boy: Douche-bags are hygienic products, I take that as a compliment. Thank you. [Keith walks off] Alexa: Ewww!

Well, see, they're trying to put this over as if there are TWO seperate promotions, so it's not THAT hard to believe that each promotion would be a World Champ. The REAL trouble is that there isn't enough booked on TV to get away with each promotion having a PPV each month, so they keep falling back on using each other instead of breaking off...

---=---:---=---[Look up a line]Wow, that belt looks like crap... I'll take it and carry it around for years and see if people can take it away from me... What? What was that? You mean even THIS belt doesn't matter! What? I'm insulted! Get away from me you... you... defiler!

All this is just off the top of my head, I generally don't bother with too much editing unless I see something which jumps off the page and screams at me for a little fixin'. Care to point out any suggestions?

I could've sworn that was a Rocky Sucks chant. I wish I taped it to double check.

Wow - WWEEEEEEEEEE sure is doing a swell job with its booking. First they buy WCW, then they devote all their energy for the better part of 2001 to unifying the rosters and all the titles. Afterwards, what do they do? Pretend the shows are "run separately" and have an extra World title! Jenkies~! What a bunch of motherfucking geniuses we have on hand, eh? Good thing for Weekend Lucha...

Bottom Line is on at about 3pm on Saturday afternoon here. I caught a bit of it and was wondering to myself who the crappy host was during a voice over of some type. Then he came on camera and I recognized him.