As someone who has gone through this same situation I offer my sincere condolences. It makes no sense at all and never fully will. My aunt was murdered by her husband of 30+ years and left behind two children ages 11-13 at the time. My heart goes out to you and your family.

"There's a fine line between hunting and sittting there looking stupid"- Unknown

"If vegetarians love animals so much why do they keep eating all their food"- Unknown