Episode 167: Nichole

NicholeAge: 25Location: Calgary, CanadaAddiction: Alcohol (beer)What’s memorable: The shaking, seizing, slurring, blackouts, and prostituting herself for beer are disturbing, as is the way she and her mother blame her sister for Nichole’s drinking. I mean what her sister and her boyfriend did was super shitty (Nichole’s boyfriend of 5 years left her for her sister and now they’re engaged) but to say that’s the whole reason she’s an alcoholic is just absurd. I know people need a scapegoat for stuff like this, I get it, but it’s all pretty unfair to pin it all on the sister.

Discussion

48 Responses to “Episode 167: Nichole”

Agreed, thank you. I don’t publish last names unless that person has passed away and/or it’s publicly available without Internet stalkage (news stories and such in which the person has willingly revealed their last name).

I just saw this episode a day ago, she was in rough shape in this episode. I hope she’s still doing OK. That entire family has some serious issues. I hope they know that 99.99% of the people watching aren’t watching to make fun of them or laugh, it’s serious business and millions of people are pulling for them to get better.

Intervention is graphic but people need to see what substance abuse does to people and entire families. Hopefully people see this and head it off before it becomes a life-consuming problem in their own lives.

Hi, I just watched this episode. I don’t know if the guests on this show ever read these comments. But I found this episode hard to watch seeing Nicole shaking so badly. I don’t always cry to shows, but this one made me cry a lot and I hoped in the end of it that Nicole has found recovery in the programe she participated in and keeps up with the recovery even after.

If Nicole sees this message, I want you to know that I felt so happy to see you agree to the help. It is the best thing in your life you will ever have done. Keep up with it and be strong. You are a beautiful woman and should be very very VERY proud of yourself for accomplishing as much as you have and I know much more in the future you can accomplish also. Thank you for inspiring me to keep up with my own recoveries in life. Big BIG Hugs to you. 🙂

What a *for lack of a more appropriate word* crappy sister. That is not an excuse, I agree, but jeez man! Have some loyalty and a little class! I felt how hurt she was, this episode made me bawl 🙁 I really felt for Nichole. I was so proud of her for being strong and overcoming this devastation in her life. I hope she’s still doing well and being the better person. The best revenge is being happy.

So agreed!!! I was just watching a rerun of this episode and was SUPER sHitt that the interventionist never (at least in the episode) ever even addressed that what her sister did to her (and the dbag boyfriwnd) was HORRIBLE! And her mom had a right to be pissed and Nichole DEFINATELY did!!! I understand that it is no excuse for her alcoholism but sometimes things are a catalyst and if that was my sister doing that to me I would probably cut that deceiving, negative person out of my life COMPLETELY! ESPECIALLY while trying to stay clean! She has got to be a TOTAL trigger for her to drink! Also no one mentions that her sister was drinking right along with her in all the early pics until she DID HER SISTERS BOYFRIEND OF 5 YEARS and then yeah….probably pushed Nichole off the edge a bit!

She had already been an alcoholic for 4 years before the boyfriend and sister got together. They’re not the reason she drank and even said so herself at the end of the episode. Her mom was a huge part of the problem as well.

Most relatable intervention I’ve ever seen. The shakes and the state of oblivion brought me back. Curious to know to know how she is. Sponsorship, and working the 12 steps as outlined in the book has kept me from that state for a while and hope for the same. To drink is to die.

While it was crappy what happened with her ex-boyfriend and sister, and the sister clearly was jealous of Nichole (maybe why she didn’t feel much guilt about the situation), they are not completely at fault for her alcoholism. She was an alcoholic before any of that happened. It bugged me how the mother was pitting them against each other. I would be upset if my daughter did that to her sister, but I wouldn’t take it that far. The mother was a huge part of the problem, and I don’t think she even realized how badly she was enabling Nichole. It was so hard to watch her shaking, very sad. Glad to hear she went back to treatment after her relapse, hope she’s still doing well!

When did it say that Nichole was an alcoholic before that happened? I don’t remember that, I remember the ep saying she was a social drinker before that but didn’t have a drinking problem. Just curious.

Anyway I would also totally spiral out of control if that happened to me, or at least begin to… you can’t help what triggers you or the initial reaction, it’s what you do after that. But I have no idea where I would head…

Agreed! I was so aggravated that the interventionist never mentioned the sister /boyfriend BS, I was reall thinking the sister should’ve been put in her place, the sister – Sam- had no right to even be at the intervention, wtf! Obviously Sam doesn’t care about her sister…

but still I think about how gross it is to date your sisters ex! I mean seeing him touch and kiss your sister for a couple of year and then to go out with him and sleep with the same guy who slept with your sister, it freaks me out to watch this

Someone mentioned they think her sister’s betrayal is just an excuse, you have no idea. I have been in a similar situation but it was my best friend (ex now) and it plagues your mind for years. You can hardly trust anyone and feel ugly and useless.

So true. it was a best friend of mine as well, not a sister and i turned to alcohol to cope with the feeling of utter betrayal and worthlessness i felt. the alcoholism went on for FIVE YEARS before i moved away and started a new life basically but i still struggle with trust issues. i was 20 when it happened so i think it hits younger people harder when things like that happen with a long term relationship.

Same here, my ex best friend not only did the same to me but also put everyone against me by lying and inventing rumors about me to cover her ass. I was pretty messed up before that but it just made everything worse. Just one more wound to the back.

I completely agree. I couldn’t finish watching this episode; I had to skip around.

My sister and I are a few years apart. Even as a dumb teenager, my response to one of her ex-boyfriends hitting on me was “oh, gross.” Not that he was a particularly bad guy, but you just don’t do that. You just do not start dating your close sister’s boyfriend. Talk about lacking class.

Nichole, what happened is not, and never will be rewritten as your fault. The best thing you can do is live well – get sober, get educated, and leave those losers in the dust. If you can find it in you to reconcile with the girl with the same parents as you (she’s no sister), you’re a better person than I would be. Go live!

The betrayal would have been much less of an issue if it weren’t for Brenda, the Mom from Hell. Both sisters would have let it go and patched things up if it weren’t for Brenda constantly bringing it up in order to satisfy her control issues and her desire to feel “needed.”

As far as the mom, I don’t agree that you have disowned sam because of Matt. You’re a mother. You shouldn’t judge. its called unconditional love. You don’t have to accept or approve of it, but you should still ALWAYS be there for your daughter. She is not the reason for where Nicole is. it may not have helped, but she was going to end up an alcoholic regardless. She is also able to make her own decisions and made her own choices to pick up the beer. You’re looking for someone to blame, and instead of doing what you should be doing, and just being there to help, you’re blaming Sam. You’re pushing her away and soon, she won’t be in your life anymore. Imagine your mom “hating” you or choosing sides like you’re doing. What if something happens to Sam and you never get the chance to make it right. She will have died thinking her mother hates her because she fell in love. Everyone knows you can’t help who you fall in love with. Yes, Sam should have NEVER started with matt in the first place, but she did and she fell in love. Its been years now, so let it go. Matt and Sam should have never gotten in a relationship. I think it was a HORRIBLE choice for both of them, especially Sam to do that to her own sister. Imagine if now, after all these years, Matt broke up with you and went back to Nicole. How would you feel? I can totally understand Nicole hurting bad. It hurts bad enough when a guy breaks up with you. You feel like you aren’t good enough. But to have it be over your own sister, wow. If that happened to me, I’d probably never talk to my sister again. But its no excuse for the alcohol, and Mom, you should NOT dismiss Sam over this. Make it right before its too late. Its been years. Let it go and start loving your daughter the way you should, unconditionally.

What her sister did was horrible!! I think it absolutely could be a catalyst into addiction. Of course there were probably other issues that she pushed down for years but I think such a traumatizing event could absolutely push her over the edge into a full blown addiction. That is such a betrayal.

I just finished watching this episode and I’m hoping by the grace of God that Nichcole is still sober!!! You are a beautiful person!!!! Some how some way I wish/hope that someone could let me know!!!!!!!!!

I just finished this episode and nothing has ever go to me on the entire filming of intervention like season 12 episode 1 of nicole like another. I was so into this episode i couldn’t stop watching and felt so bad for the things this girl went through. This showed me that no matter what u go through in life u can over come anything like nicole did i would love some how to keep up with her and follow how she is doing, like i said i have never been so ivisited in a show in whole life like i was with this one please if anyone knows how she is doing or if u r reading this please email or something thank u and i know this might not mean a lot i am so so proud of u

Nichole may have been the addict, but her mother was by far the sickest person shown in the episode. Nichole may eventually need to cut all ties with her mum in order to maintain her sobriety and psychological well being.

I felt so much for Nichole in this episode. I could really sympathize with her feelings of hurt and betrayal because of her sister dating her ex boyfriend. I am in a somewhat similar situation with my child’s father dating my brother’s ex girlfriend. I have used and abused alcohol to cope with those feelings as well as many different aspects of my life and my self that I struggle with. I am now in an outpatient treatment program and doing well. Your story gave me inspiration to seek help. Thank you so much for that. I still struggle with feelings of hurt and betrayal surrounding my child’s father and brothers ex girlfriend dating, but I have deffinately come to realize that happiness is truly the best revenge.

I think what pisses me off the most about the entire situation is how arrogantly and heartlessly both the sister and the boyfriend justified their behavior. Yeah, okay, everyone makes mistakes, but they’re both too busy trying to defend what they did to even understand Nicole’s side of it. The boyfriend especially seemed so quick to jump into why he was so innocent (“It just happened!”) that it never occurred to him to take responsibility for hurting another human being that cared about him. Even in the episode, when Nicole asked, “If you’re sorry, why are you still with him?” it seems to still hold some weight. Now there’s kids involved? Inexcuseable.

It must be nice to be about to skirt around the consequences of your actions so easily.

This is so drama mama family with genetic alcohol and deep emotional issues. I think the sis is a crazy chick. All will pass in time. Enjoy the good life and get rid of bad peep and habits in your life. Have Fun and enjoy. find the good.

I would NEVER speak to my sister again if she did this to me. I don’t understand why the situation with the sister and boyfriend wasn’t addressed during the episode because it clearly played a major factor in Nichole’s situation. Yes, I know, that her drinking was her choice but what her sister did was a HUGE trigger. We all know there’s a girl code that you never mess around with a friends ex boyfriend let alone your own sisters boyfriend. He left Nichole to be with the sister.. so obviously he cheated on her with her sister. How selfish can you be? As far as the mother, I don’t understand why people wanted to blame her for the struggles between the sisters. Yes a mother loves unconditionally but what’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong. Her daughter chose to be with him over her own sister. I don’t blame the mother for reacting that way.

But what is the point? Say they had jumped on the sister and the boyfriend and gave them grief. Say even that they apologized or broke up or whatever. Nicholle would still be an alcoholic.

I don’t believe in the girl code or the guy code or whatever. I just believe in being a good person. I don’t necessarily think that those two getting together was a good or right thing to do but I don’t think that they caused Nicholle’s alcoholism. She had a crisis in her life and her coping strategy was to drink. Say the precipitating event had been that she was fired from a job – would you say that it was her boss’s fault that she started drinking or that he was a trigger so he should be blamed during her intervention? That’s the problem and that’s what needs fixing. There’s work that the family needed to do too – but around their enabling – not around punishing the sister.

Life is short. Those two people fell in love. Are they supposed to be miserable and apart to make everybody else happy? Did Everyone miss the part that they were freaking 15 when they got together? The huge problem is that the mother let him move in when they were only seventeen. So they were children allowed to play house like they were adults, yet they weren’t. The sister’s alcoholism would have happened regardless of the Matt situation.

Hi. I just saw this episode and my heart went out to Nichole. I hope she’s doing ok. My maternal grandfather was an alcoholic. During my mother’s childhood he would drink and get abusive. He killed himself when my mom was in her early teens.

Alcholism is a huge problem. I don’t drink. But I have a lot of issues in my life every day. I hope you’re well and better.

What always struck me about this episode was how her parents allowed her boyfriend to move in while they were in high school. I would LOVE to have seen the response my parents would give if my sister asked that while in high school. On top of it, they were shocked the boyfriend went from one girl to the other.

Seriously, this show makes me even more glad that I’m never having children.

I hope Nichole is doing well today. I never watched Intervention before – but as a dad to two girls; this one just broke my heart. Friends and family are always influences – her best bet was moving away from that toxic environment.