As of this year, I have plenty of new little scars zigzagging just below my right index finger nail. Why ? well, many a time when I break an ampoule, I don’t use any instrument, but try my luck with my fingers. I escape 99. 7 % of the time. The other .3 % accounts for the 6 – 7 small remnants.

2. What does your phone look like?

Nokia 6233. Its champagne brown and very very sleek ( by Nokia standard only ). It’s still in its first month with me so its my pride.. u know how it is – filling the 1gb memory card with everything and anything, changing the themes every 2 hrs, changing the wallpapers every 1 hour… taking ppl's pic so they'll say "hey, new mob" and I'll go.. "oh, u noticed"3. What is on the walls of your bedroom?

Cobwebs… I live in a hostel room and sleep 4 hours a day.. u think the walls are a priority ?

4. What is your current desktop picture?

Since I don’t have a personal laptop , I’ll suffice by saying that my present mobile wallpaper is a gorgeous picture of Tabu. Sigh !! such a natural beauty.

5. Do you believe in gay marriage?

I believe in love. Gender, age, religion, caste : those are secondary. If you love someone, you’re halfway to heaven. So yes, I believe in gay marriage. ( Gays of the world, don’t rejoice too much though , I also believe that my old Ambassador car was a TRANSFORMER in disguise.. so maybe my support ain't worth a lot. )

6. What do you want more than anything right now?

A break from this pretentious life – to be back home or in Mangalore, in CCD, with the old gang, just relaxing and being ourselves... bitching about each other in front of each other.

7. What time were you born?

26 january, 1981… 10.50 pm Dubai time.

8. Are your parents still together?

Yes.

9. Last person who made you cry?

I don’t cry over real life events a lot. If you wanna make me cry, take me to a tear jerker movie.. I remember getting wet eyed while watching old episodes of Wonder years, MASH ( the last episode breaks my heart every time without fail..), heck, I got goose bumps when Rachel replies “ I got off the plane” in the last episode of FRIENDS. What can I say ? Reel life over real life anyday.

10. What is your favorite perfume/cologne?

Presently, I’m on Jacques Bogarts Eau Fresh.. it’s a very ummm.. uhhh.. FRESH smell. To quote them - " Eau Fresh De Jacques Bogart Is A Spicy, Sweet Aroma For Men. Crisp And Refreshing Blend Of Rosemary, Vetiver, Lemon And Mandarin." I like it. In college, it was Amitabh Bachchan for men.Coming up next - I have my eye on a few sprays from Chris Adams. Though, Im open to any suggestions from anyone on good sprays.. guys - any good ladykiller sprays to make me " the complete hunk ?"

11. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex?

Hmmm.. Black, brown , blonde, red head, blue heads.. did I miss any ?

12. What are you listening to?

Once more, the dual personality in me comes out. In my sensitive moments, I succumb to Awaarapan’s “Tera Mera Rishta”.. it hurts me and thus I listen to it again and again. Go figure. On the other hand, my caller tune presently in “Soni De Nakre” from Partner.. extremes, huh ? Before i die, i promise u, I will dance like Govinda and Salman did in that song.. sal MAA KASAM !!

13. Do you get scared of the dark?

Never. I've walked in between the riots late in midnight, slept in the beach till 2am and walked around the house in complete darkness since i was a kid ( boy, was i cheap )

14. Do you like pain killers?

Naaaa… use it on patients, but never on myself..

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Yes. In all these years, I’ve never been able to actually go ask someone out. Weird. Maybe I should try it. What do I have to lose, huh ? You’re never too old to learn to flirt !!!

16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?

A big greasy chicken Sizzler at Liquid Lounge with a side order of Chicken nuggets. Drinks ? We’ll discuss that when I get there.

17. Who was the last person you made mad?

Many many people here drive me up the wall. Its who leaves me sane that counts… cant think of any in that list presently. I used to be famous for being docile but these days my threshold has fallen aplenty.. infact, I've just probably banned myself from the nearest net centre less than an hour ago while typing this post - the current went 5 minutes after I logged in and he demanded I pay the full amount since it was a "login first system"

18. Is anyone in love with you?

I can honestly say after nearly a decade of fake ego boosting, the answer now is finally NO. And it sucks. Its like being kicked out of the big leagues and back into a school playground. Sometimes, it’s only when you lose everything, that you realize how much you had, isn’t it ? And before you say “ your parents love you “, well , that’s what I thought too till I overheard them striking a deal with a retail store to exchange me for a Chihuahua and 2 bottles of orange marmalade jam. Damn you, Big Baaz..stard, retail store, damn you to hell.

The tag is open for anyone. Please do post a comment telling me you’re taking up the tag though, just so I can read the comments.I’ll be off the blog for 2 weeks.. exams beckon. So be good and fight the good fight and dont let the aliens take over the planet till i come back.

It is a little known fact but I was actually an advice guru for a brief spell in a leading website. "Brief" is perhaps an exaggeration since I was abruptly relieved from my post on my very first day for reasons that have yet to be revealed to me despite numerous complaints to the CEO of that damned site. Personally I suspect that they were just too cheap to pay me, especially once they realised my insane talent and saw how other companies would give me better offers once my scholarly talents were discovered. The fact that I had demanded Swiss chocolates and a Rolls Royce , in addition to my first paycheck, probably had nothing to do with the termination.

Ya, I know what you're thinking, you smug ass. "He's bluffing AGAIN !! " Hah !! Well, the jokes on you, smarty pants. As proof that I did work with them, I have a mastercopy of my advice rendered( stolen via sophisticated new age technology - I call it Project Ctrl - C. )I present to you the humble beginnings of this soon-to-be-famous advice guru in

"Ask Uncle rOSHO."

Broken Heart 87 : Dear rOSHO, I'm in love with a guy since 2 years. But he doesn't even know I exist even though we stay in the same colony. How do I get him to notice me ?rOSHO : Hi, Broken Heart 87. A lot of people have the same problem. It's nothing to be worried about. I have the perfect solution. Just follow these easy steps. First, find out who his best friends are.Broken Heart 87 : I get it. Get them to introduce me , right ?rOSHO : No, no. That's old fashioned. Step 2 is to make out with all of them. In no time, the guy will be queueing up for his turn. Trust me, it worked with all my ( ex ) best friend's girl friends.Broken Heart 87 has logged off.

Young@heart : Dear rOSHO, does love at first site exist ?rOSHO : Depends on what you part of her you're looking at.Young@heart has logged off.

Bewitched : Dear rOSHO, I've been going out with a guy for a couple of dates now. He's the perfect gentleman with me. But my friends tell me that inside all men lies a sex offender. How do I know that my man is the genuine hing and is not just fooling me ?rOSHO : Bewitched, what mobile phone does your guy have ?Bewitched : Umm.. a Nokia N73.rOSHO : Good. Well, the next time you meet him, find an excuse to play arund with his mobile while he's not looking. Then hunt for sex videos in that mobile.Bewitched : I see. So if he has sex videos, he's a pervert ?rOSHO : Don't be silly. Every guy with a video enabled mobile has sex videos. His morality depends on how openly he prefers to keep it. If it's right out in the first folder, then he's a "what you see is what you get" kinda guy. If it's hidden deep down in a folder titled "Stock Market News".. then he's a guy who's got a lot to hide, Dear.Bewitched : But what if he's got no sex videos ?rOSHO : Then he's probably after your brother.Bewitched has logged off.

Lonely Angel : I'm disillusioned in life. Everything I touch fails me. My girlfriend left me for my friend. I'm one step away from hanging myself, rOSHO. I need to hear some uplifting words. Tell me there is hope of a better world. What is the meaning of life ?rOSHO : I'll tell you what isn't the meaning of life, you ignoramus. It is NOT turning on the internet at 11 am in the afternoon and asking someone you don't even know what the meaning of life is !!! How bored in life are you , you cry baby loser !! Get a job, get a life, get a girl. Sheesh. You're one of those big time losers, ain't ya.. rOSHO : Hello ?rOSHO : Hello.. yoohoo ?rOSHO : Guess he logged off..

Armageddon 2000 : Is the END OF THE WORLD approaching ?rOSHO : No, dipshit. It's going farther away.In fact, you're part of God's special Easter bonus program who'll live forever and ever and yet age gracefully. Moron.Armageddon 2000 has logged off.

Confused guy : Hi. I have an embarrassing problem. I'ma 15 year old in love with my Chemistry tuition teacher. She's so sweet and gorgeous. I don't know what to do. I'm thinking of getting her a red rose to show my feelings. What do you think ?rOSHO : Seriously. What age are you living in ? Red roses are passe. Now, here's what I suggest you do. First of all, is she married ?Confused guy : No. She stays alone in a one bedroom flat.rOSHO : Perfect. Now, I suggest you get a 1 litre cola bottle the next time you go to her. But first, buy a 180 ml Smirnoff bottle too. Pour it into the cola bottle for attaining the desired effect. Getting her to drink the whole bottle is gonna be the tricky part. But, of course, before that, you have to be "safe." I suggest you go to the nearest pharmaceutical store and get yourself a packet of ..