Try not to feel overwhelmed

Many women feel thoroughly overwhelmed in the beginning and surprised at how this tiny baby can completely consume all their time.

Don’t lose perspective. You may feel like this will go on forever but in fact it actually lasts for a very short period and once you get used to being with children all the time you’ll probably find it’s hard when your baby goes off to nursery, and you no longer have someone to take to the shops with you.

Those baby and toddler years are undoubtedly much easier for women who have supportive relatives or grandparents living nearby who will occasionally mind the baby for them.

Let the housework slide

While a routine is good, don't try to force a routine on your baby and don’t even attempt to live your life as it was before she arrived.

If you get upset by an untidy, disorganised house it will be harder for you to accept the fact that with a baby around, cleaning is now pretty low down on your list of priorities.

Your main priority is to keep your baby fed, clean and happy. However, if you're only happy living in an organised home with a proper cooked meal on the table every evening, you will have to reach some kind of compromise with your partner.

Even before your baby arrives it is probably best to talk to your partner about what you both expect, or want, eachother to do, and then always be open with one another about problems as they arise. Try to keep your expectations reasonable.

Try to enjoy the changes

It’s important to remember that life with a baby will be continually changing because your child develops and changes so very much in the first twelve months of life.

This may mean that just when you have got used to the fact that she has two naps a day she will suddenly need only one nap and that may be at an inconvenient time.

And just when you have rescheduled your life around that new pattern, your baby suddenly decides to go almost a full day without a nap at all, but continually falls asleep in the early evening so she won’t sleep at all when you put her down for the night!

Try not to get stressed about it and remember this is just a phase and it won’t last for long.

Getting used to being at home

Another great change for many women is the difference between working and staying at home, even if you are on maternity leave and plan to return to work eventually.

When you are in full time work you spend very little time in your own home and therefore may not know many people in the area.

When you are home with your baby every day of the week there is no structure and virtually no routine. Suddenly the times that your partner leaves for work and comes back to the house is the only thing putting some kind of framework around an otherwise formless day.

Get out of the house

Getting out of the house and seeing other people can be very important to your morale and self-esteem. It sometimes happens that being based at home looking after small children can make women feel less confident about their abilities in situations and circumstances which they might not have given a second thought to when they were in full time employment.

We should not minimise or undervalue the challenges involved in becoming a parent for the first time and it helps to remind yourself how many new skills you are learning at this stage in your life - from child care to family psychology.

The information on this website is for general information and it is not intended as, nor should it be considered as a substitute for seeing your own GP, midwife or healthcare professional. You are advised to seek professional medical advice if you have any concerns or suspect you have a medical problem.