Do I really need to ask for more?

I became obsessed with negotiating after a friend helped me negotiate a significant increase in my compensation package. Prior to learning this step by step process, I had never asked for more than the offer price. Learning how to negotiate not only significantly changed my financial trajectory by tens of thousands of dollars, it changed my relationship to employment.

So I started reading every book I could find about negotiation (“Ask For It” is my favorite). I came across study after study that illustrated that women simply do not ask for more.

In one study, researchers asked kids in first through 10th grade, to perform a small task and pay themselves what they thought deserved in the form of Hershey’s kisses. Across all age groups, girls consistently undervalued themselves — between 30 and 78 percent less than the boys!

I decided to test it out.

I found this pretty shocking, and decided to do an experiment where I asked kids to do a short task and then pay themselves what they felt they deserved in chocolate kisses. The results supported the study, and while my experiment was in no way statistically significant, it certainly drives the point home. This is UNSCRIPTED!

So today, I’m questioning everything. I’m calling my landlord and asking for $50 to be knocked off my rent (because the apartment next door is going for that price). I’m asking my office to throw in a free intercom system (because we’re considering other offices).