The 'Celebrity Perv Apology Generator' mocks the hollow public statements of men in power

We’re living in a cultural moment that finally takes accusations of sexual harassment and abuse seriously, and as such, we’ve been reading a lot of public apologies lately.

Accused celebrities from Kevin Spacey to Louis C.K. to Jeffrey Tambor (among many others) have issued statements that run the gamut from lukewarm to inappropriately personal, but in general, they all read just about the same way. In fact, these apologies generally follow a format so simple to recreate that even a computer could write one.