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May 4, 2015

April was a blur it seems. Only two posts here on SS Jess, and now all of a sudden it's May. And it's 80 degrees outside, and the first round of summer clothing has made a bold takeover in my retail job.

I was so stressed out last month. I had a handful of big emotional breakdowns. You know, in high school when you're dating, if you and your boyfriend break up it's like the end of the world. Having your heart broken for the first time is one of the absolute worst feelings, and it's so much worse if it happens in high school because you're immature and terrible at getting a grip on your emotions. Last month though, I experienced negative emotions that were so much worse than my high school break ups. Even though my break up sadness made me feel paralyzed and alone, I still always knew that I would eventually get over it at some point. But last month, I wasn't sure if I would ever get out of the awful black hole I had fallen into. In high school I felt alone, but last month I felt helpless. And I've decided that helpless is so much worse than alone.