April 19, 2006

NOTE: To read about the most recent "Amercian Idol" results show, click on the "Althouse" banner above and scroll down to the top "results" post.

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I must confess that I adore Ryan Seacrest! He perfectly manages our excitement and makes sure the cruelty is just enough that we feel good about it. Tonight, he creates two groups of three: Elliott, Kellie, and Katharine on one side, and Chris, Paris, and Ace on the other. Then, Taylor -- told he's safe -- is asked to go join the group that he thinks is the bottom three. But first a commercial. TiVo...

Ah, but it is Ace who is leaving... Which is exactly what we expected. He deserves it.

Aw, Ace, you should never have pulled back your lustrous curls!

Oh, and Rod Stewart sang. He kind of sang badly, but I still have a lot of love for Rod. Take me back, carry me back, down to gasoline alley where I started from.

ADDED: Did you have a vague memory of a show a while back where they used the seventh person the way they used Taylor tonight? I did. I dug out the old post from April 2004:

American Idol: The Outrage. What the hell happened? That was the worst thing ever on American Idol. See my post from this morning for how I read the show last night: I thought Jennifer was the best. I thought the three Divas would be the final three. They were the bottom three! How could that happen? Jennifer was my original favorite, from the first audition. I can only think that the strong praise for the Divas caused people to think they didn't need help, and people speed dialed for two hours for favorites they believed were in danger. I must say they really revealed the results dramatically, telling George to join the safe group, causing him to walk over to the Divas (forming a group that was my predicted final four: George and the Divas), then telling him he'd joined the wrong group. Oh, the outrage!

But Jennifer Hudson is now starring in the movie "Dream Girls." So that worked out rather well.

YET MORE: The final 7 results were also done this way in 2005. Here's my post:

The results will be revealed by bringing everyone on stage into one of two groups and then saying which is the bottom group. We saw this last season in the shocking results show where the three black female singers were grouped and, to our amazement, told they were the bottom. (One of them, Fantasia, went on to win the contest.) So I'm expecting that the group that looks safe will be the bottom, but I can't see how that can happen with these contestants, since clearly Bo and Constantine will not be in the bottom group. Vonzell too. Vonzell goes to the left, Anthony to the right. The right must be bad. Anwar joins Anthony. Okay, then there is no question. Right is bad. Constantine joins Vonzell. What scintilla of suspense can there be? Carrie goes to the left. Scott goes to the right. What about Bo? The groups are even. So he's just told he's safe and then he's asked to join the group he thinks is the top. He goes to the middle. He's not playing games. Why should he take orders?

After the break, we're told what we already know. The Scott, Anthony, Anwar group is at risk. And the loser, as I, and many others, predicted, is Anwar.

Taylor was trying to drag out his moment with a fake choice of what was obviously the bottom group (because it had Ace in it). Ryan started to tell him he was wrong and he moved, but I think he was on his (slow) way to the Elliott group all along.

I'm not so sure Taylor was being coy. Kellie was in the "safe group" and she herself admitted "Ah butchered it!" last night. This is Chris's first bottom three and Ace had praise from Simon last night. Taylor really chose wrong, I think and Seacrest directed him to the proper group.

Now the show gets really interesting. All 6 who are left are really good. I expect to lose Paris and Elliott in the next 2 weeks. I think Katharine, Kellie, Taylor, and Chris are a really strong final four. But the only one I'd bet on to make it to the finale is Taylor. They've never had a finale with 2 guys. I don't believe that will happen. I think the final will be Kellie and Taylor. But Katharine is gaining strength. At the auditions stage she was my favorite... But now she bugs me. Paris bugs me too. Oh, hell, they all bug me. Except my dear, sweet Chris...

What can you possinly like about Chris?? I saw him doing "What A Wonderful World" last night and it was an absolutely lame and boring performance of a song that's so great it seems hard to make so lame.

The classic love song theme next week could really help someone like Katharine and maybe Paris as well. I think Taylor and Chris are very strong for the final four and maybe final two. Kellie can not afford a "New Attitude" moment, she got one pass by being honest. Katharine I still think has the most potential.

BTW I wonder what Rod's going to cover in his 70s Rock Classic Album he mentioned

Katharine is the most talented. I like Chris, though not in the way Ann seems to (or with the passion). Elliot's Stevie Wonder things makes me like him. My sister-in-law downloaded Taylor's album of covers and it was painfully boring. He entertains on the show, but the CD was gawdawful. I'm glad Ace went and am sure we will see him hosting MTV News sometime soon -- or perhaps he can replace Tara Reid on E!

"The classic love song theme next week could really help someone like Katharine"

No doubt. I suspect having someone with eyes like hers singing a love song to the camera might be enough to have even someone with my contempt for the show phone in a vote for her. Good God, I'm in danger of getting suckered in to this business...

Professor Althouse believes that Taylor is most likely to make the finale. None of the commentators here seem to like him, and my friends aren’t fans. If he makes it to the end I’ll paraphrase the (apocryphal?) Pauline Kael statement: “I can’t believe Taylor won. No one I know voted for him.”

Taylor has his following; it's misguided. I’m sorry Thecla, I can’t figure it out either, except to say that too many people have a favorite mediocre bar band. Taylor epitomizes the front-man of that band.

I'm sorry I missed this week, sort of. I don't really like any of the contestants, but I root for Katherine because she has a couple of obvious assets. I think Taylor probably has the most interesting sound, and it would've been interesting to hear him do one of my favorite Sam Cooke songs.

But I do know people who vote for him--or at least who would, if they vote, which I'm not sure they do. They're two people in my office, and from what I can tell they don't vote the way I do on most other things, either.

I'm afraid Ann is right and that Paris and Elliot will be the next two to go. They're my two favorites at this point. Among the other four, the best one, in my book, is definitely Chris. I'll be interested to see how long Katherine and Kellie remain in the running though.

Ann, I just want to thank you for posting these updates. I badly mismanaged my schedule this spring from an AI-viewing perspective, with evening obligations on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. So I come here first thing the next morning, and the way you write things up makes me feel like I didn't miss it at all.

Emily, you're welcome. I'm amazed at the traffic I get because of these "results" posts. Google "instalanches" me every Wednesday night. Not that I wouldn't do the "results" post just for the hell of it...

Good grief, they coined a term for it now? LOL. Finding something worthwhile and watchable on AI seems to me like finding a little gem of a floor statement in a statute's legislative history, one which would seem to not only strengthen your case, but make it - yet, even while reading this gem, you know that citing legislative history is the forbidden fruit...

Ann says, "But Jennifer Hudson is now starring in the movie "Dream Girls. So that worked out rather well".

I believe she's "in" "Dream Girls", not starring. Nitpicking, I know.

I heard Carrie's audition, last year, and felt/knew she'd win. I felt the same way, this year, after hearing Katharine's audition. Just a beautiful voice.

If you still have the programs, listen to Katharine sing at the piano with Stevie Wonder and then again with Rod Stewart. Best talent I’ve heard on American Idol. (I didn’t watch the first year of A.I.-my wife “drug me in”, kicking and screaming, the second year).

I understand why women like Chris. He, really, needs a voice teacher, though. His vibrato sounds like a "billy goat operating a jackhammer." (I got that from an "Idol" forum, not my description:) Just hold the note until the end and then add vibrato.

Taylor is a "one-trick pony" and a "bar singer". He'd be good singing, and dancing, in the village square for change.

Kellie's voice is not strong enough and she's not up to the pressure that comes at this phase of AI. That's why she rushed the song she sang, Tuesday night. She wanted to get through it and have it be over.

Elliot is better each week and has the second most singing talent, after Katharine. His only problem is, no "stage presence".

Regarding Taylor - He's not necessarily my favorite (Chris is) but he's the only person I've ever actually voted for. When he tried to kick over the microphone stand last week and missed, I felt so bad I voted twice!

Although recently I did find out he was a pudgester, when young, so that might explain his metrosexual good-looks.

Also, I cannot get Kathy Griffin's Bravo channel show out of my mind...

...when she recounted how his antics at an Awards Show, where he cupped her boobs or tore off her dress, or some such, left her mortified.

What a dweeb.

P.S.: Last Idol show I saw was "She bangs! She bangs!" which I've been told, isn't even the real show, just the prelims. I am thus not one of the 80 million Americans who seems to be engrossed by this show -- although fair play to all who are.

I think everybody undervalues Paris. Her performance of "Those Foolish Things" proved that she has the ability to build and shape a musical phrase in an accomplished way. Of course at her age, she couldn't have had the life experiences that would allow her to connect with the content of what she is singing, but her future should be promising.

Don't understimate Kellie. She clearly has a huge base of guys voting for her. To not even be in the bottom three after that performance: amazing. And like I said yesterday, her audition long ago domonstrated she has a great voice in there somewhere. If she could suddenly harness that, well, she could make a run from the outside on the backstretch. And I do believe she's a natural comedian.

Paulfrommpls: Your Kellie theory reminds me of that episode of "Partridge Family" where Keith [David Cassidy] hired a woman to sing with the band who couldn't sing at all. He was blinded by her beauty and only realized his mistake when the tape was played back to him.

Are you sure Kathy Griffin was talking about Ryan Seacrest cupping breasts on the red carpet? I'm sure that was Isaac Mizrahi checking out Scarlett Johanson and copping a feel, not Sir Seacrest, which is why Ryan got the gig co-hosting E!news. I'm not even sure Ryan would be all that into breasts........

My husband and I have never watched a full season of AI before this year. We caught the end of last season, basically just the hype between Bo and Carrie, but I can't even recall anyone else's name.

At any rate, somehow we have been riveted, and repulsed at the results show each week this season. We have been shocked each week to see Ace survive and see anyone else go. Seriously, how could America decide that Ace should stay and Mandisa should go? And although we couldn't have been happier to see Ace go this week, we couldn't believe that Chris was in the bottom three.

We have enjoyed Taylor's difference, Elliot's crooning, and Chris's performances seem to be something you could imagine outside of AI. Somehow I can't see him winning though. I would imagine it would be better for him if it came down to him and one other. But who would that be? If we were going purely by the singing (which we all know isn't how this thing gets decided or Mandisa would still be there) then I would say Katherine wins.

But Ruth Anne - after her audition, I thought "My God, this woman sings a whole lot better than Carrie Underwood!" (who I never liked that much). Haven't heard it since. It may have been an easy song; don't remember what it was. But it's like the return of King Arthur: I retain faith that it just may happen...

And again, the fact that she has never been in the bottom three despite sucking or nearly sucking week after week: some group is clearly mesmerized by her.

However talented Kellie may or may be she has a certain charm that gives her an advantage. She seems to react to pressure in an appealing way, whereas Ace reacted by being creepy. How do they say it, "she's comfortable in her own skin."

I too thought her audition (like Katharine's) was better than anything since, possibly because it was a capella without the over production of the band, etc. and shorter. Perhaps they were songs they had sung a thousand times not just for a week or two in rehearsal

Are you sure Kathy Griffin was talking about Ryan Seacrest cupping breasts on the red carpet?

Hey! I never mentioned anything about red carpet. ;)

No, I remember catching that D-List show of hers on Bravo, when she said that Ryan Seacrest (who I thought was some quarterback, at the time...!) had humiliated her on the podium during an awards ceremony.

Here is the event, as per anedoctage.com:

Kathy Griffin: Ryan See Breast

During the 2003 American Music Awards, "American Idol" host Ryan Seacrest gave the audience a surprise presaging Janet Jackson's 2004 Super Bowl shocker - by ripping co-presenter Kathy Griffin's blouse open on stage to expose a frilly, black lace bra. Unfortunately, Griffin was equally surprised. "Ryan Seacrest physically assaulted me," she later complained. "Follow me to the precinct, he's going down! Look, maybe I did walk up the freaking stairs like Shania, but Ryan Seacrest took my top off! That would never happen to Shania."

...what made it cool is that Ludacris, or another rapper, I forget, was presenting the next award, and as he passed her on the podium, he genuinely looked stunned, and asked her, "Girl, you okay?".

I'm not even sure Ryan would be all that into breasts........

I think it's pretty much unanimous, with this comment, Corinna.

I don't think one person I have met who has spoken about Ryan, doesn't think he's not effeminate, at least.

And you know, ripping off the blouse of a woman in public seems something a man does who is either (a) a frat boy (b) wants people to think he's really macho.

If only that pagent reject McPhee would go next. She should not stand too close to a radiator, she is so plastic she would melt. BTW, what the hell was the commentator who said if McPhee won it would prove beauty could win smoking in his hookah? She's hotter than Carrie? Or Kellie? Pshaw and balderdash.

Chris is a very good one trick pony who grows boring when he strays from the angst ridden alt-rocker. Call Fuel and line up the gig as Chris Daughtery and Fuel.

Paris is cute but can't decide if she is 16 or 60. Will go shortly.

Elliott is like Jim Nabors. Much easier to enjoy if you don't look at him while he sings.

Kellie has a future as a personality, maybe filling in for Kelly Ripa when she goes on vacation. Hell, you don't even have to change the name of the show.

Taylor I just don't get, but my wife loves him. To me it is like watching someone with Tourettes and a full body tic, you are just waiting for the train to jump the tracks.

I ain`t know y u don`t appreciate Paris talent. She has a powerhouse voice. I neither know y u all say she is cocky. 4 me the only moment she was cocky was when she answered singing in Stevie Wonder`s week.