Last night at the 85th annual Academy Awards, for the most part, the look on the red carpet was classic Hollywood glamour. Like rare birds during mating season, A-listers tried to outshine each other, and some of the bright plumage and peacockery on display was truly stunning. Alas, there were a few sartorial missteps — and at least one scorching hot mess.

Okay, on to what you really care about: The gowns. Black was a big color last night. Kristin Chenoweth's crystal-encrusted Giorgio Armani gown is just a teeny tiny bit pageanty.

Plunging cleavage and a magnificent jewel for Samantha Barks. (The official description of the necklace: "House of Waris for Forevermark Light Emanating from the Heart pendant in 18k yellow gold with Oval Forevermark diamond.")

Body-hugging black for Jenna Dewan and Salma Hayek.

Classic, unfussy black for singers Adele and Dame Shirley Bassey.

Shimmery, curve-skimming black looks fabulous on Nicole Kidman, even if that ripped out midsection looks like she just gave birth to an alien and hasn't been stitched up yet.

Moving on to some colorful gowns: Jennifer Hudson sparkles in sapphire.

Also in sapphire: Adorable Quvenzhané Wallis and her adorable puppy purse.

Subdued navy for Helen Hunt and Emmanuelle Riva.
Hunt's dress is from H&M, believe it or not.

Deep color and hemline drama: Gloria Ruben, Jackie Weaver.

Amethyst ruffles (by Gucci) are beautiful on Jennifer Garner. Did you see the back?

Now we have some brighter colors! Maria Menounos and Fan Bingbing are both resplendent in hot pink, but Fan's earrings and epic bun make her the winner here. The first dress is Romona Keveza; the latter is Marchesa.

Kerry Washington's jewel-encrusted coral Miu Miu gown looked better on TV than it does in pictures.

Sally Field schools fools: This Valentino gown is Academy Award-level drama. Check out the massive rocks hanging from her ears.

Sixty-six years old and killing it.

More red: Jennifer Aniston, who usually does narrow, body-hugging column dresses, switches things up with a timeless Valentino ball gown.

Kristen Stewart's hair looks dirty and her dress would be great on someone else. She looks better in red or black.

Whisper-soft colors are spectacular on Amanda Seyfried and Octavia Spencer.

Oh dear, Anne Hathaway. This stiff Prada dress has darts on the bust, which caused everyone to start talking about her breasts — and now her nipples have a faux Twitter account. Disaster. Ignoring the darts, the dress is fine, but not really as elegant, dramatic or show-stopping as you'd expect. But with the darts? Yikes. Mess.

The back details? Pretty. Just not enough to save the trainwreck front.

If ever there was a time to wear a frothy silvery gray Oscar de le Renta ball gown, this is it. Kudos to Amy Adams. I wish it wasn't so colorless — imagine green, blue or blush pink?

That said, it's a truly gorgeous garment.

But the winner — of the Oscar and for best dressed — is Jennifer Lawrence in Dior Haute Couture. Even though this ball gown is huge and caused her to trip and fall, with the light pink undertones and backward-hanging necklace, it's a simple, classic, beautiful modern A-list look. Divine.