Smaller list than last year. I tried not to give myself unrealistic expectations. I will also do better about writing down the journey in this blog. I’m really concentrated this year on BDSM and the dogs getting their titles. My job also is in that too. I want to learn how to do more so I don’t feel like a complete idiot. Here’s to 2017 and my new goal list. Im guessing I hope you guys will be my accountability partners LOL. Help keep me on track.

Ok, so I wrote about all the bad things in 2016. At the end I am thankful for a lot:

* My wonderful Husband/Sir

* My boxer dogs.

* My job

* My in-law family

* My small family

* The ability to not want for anything.

* My new kink family in my local community and online community

* The 132 followers I have on wordpress. Wow! It humbles me and moves me to tears that so many people like mt blog. I hope it helps.

OK so 2016 was an awful year me and Sir almost got a divorce (three times), I was hospitalized twice and countless Emergency Room visits. A lot of people I knew died this year. When I think of 2016 I wanna light that bitch on fire and forget it ever happened. The only thing to do now is to look forward to 2017 and what it will bring. I will not dwell on 2016.

Christmas was probably the beginning of the light at the end of the tunnel. Sir got me aa pink Under Armour hoodie. If you guys didn’t know I could be a spokesperson for Under Armour. I love their products, especially in the winter when I’m training my dogs outside. He noticed I didn’t have a pink one and pink is my favorite color so he got me one. He also got me an Under Armour Jacksonville Jaguar t-shirt as well. I got him a Nike Fleece outfit, hoodie and sweatpants. All he wears most of the time are sweatpants so I knew he would like it. He wore it on Christmas to his mom’s house and my grandmas house.

Well Christmas makes me feel happy. Its a time where I get to see my wonderful in-law family and catch up with their lives. I look forward to it. I also secretly look forward to the gifts as well, lol. I love giving as well as receiving (in more ways then one *evil grin*). I love the look on my nieces faces when they open their presents. It makes me want to be a kid again. This Christmas is extra special, Sir and I have reconciled and I am lucky and happy to be back with him. That is gift enough for me. But he got me my favorite brand of hoodie Under Armour (I could be a spokes person), however I don’t own one in my favorite color…pink. So he got me that and a Under Armour T-shirt with our favorite teams logo the Jacksonville Jaguars. So I wore it earlier when we went over to my in-laws house for breakfast. And I will be wearing it this evening when we go over my grandmas house for dinner.

Breakfast was really nice this morning. Its always great listening to my nieces tell me what their parents got them for Christmas. They do Christmas at their house then come over to my mother-in-laws house as well. We decided since Sir’s father was just in the hospital that we would postpone our present giving until next weekend. So we just had a nice big family breakfast.

Christmas time to me is about family and being with the ones you love. Now family does not have to be a blood relative. People choose who are in their family. Well that’s my opinion on that.

I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to everyone! I hope your day is filled with love and joy! I am working on posts, so don’t worry I will be back soon. Of course I have to write about my 2017 goals soon as well. Well I’m off again Merry Christmas everyone!!!!

Because I’ve been in the hospital and my physical therapy wants me to hold off going back until I see my rehab doctor 6 weeks from now, I’ve been forced to resign from Feeder’s Supply. I have mixed feelings about this. I knew it probably wouldn’t last in the back of my mind but I tried so hard. I really appreciated the discount and it helped a lot financially. But on the other hand it makes me feel like I failed. I can’t help that I am sick. The manager seemed like he didn’t want to do it that HR was telling him he had to. But I also understand that my absence puts them in a bind as well with having to fill those hours. He has to think about whats best for the store and I understand that. I sent Sir a text about it but he hasn’t responded yet. I feel so bad right now…..

Yay! I’m going home tomorrow and I am so excited. I’ve been in the hospital for two weeks. While I would like to thank the wonderful doctors, nurses, and aides that took care of me, I’d definitely rather be home. I miss my puppies and I’m anxious to start over with Sir. I have so much to do when I get home but Saturday is reserved to spending time with the puppies and resting. Out of all the hospitalizations I’ve had in the past because of my Lupus this one I missed my dogs so much more. Maybe because the rehab facility had a therapy dog that I saw everyday. But I can’t wait to have them jumping all over me and giving me their sloppy boxer kisses.

Sunday I definitely have to get my hair done, its looks a hot mess. Sir says the house looks the same as I left it, which means it will need cleaning. I also need to take Mr. Presco to rally run thrus if we are going to show in January. Which I plan to the first and second full weekends. The first weekend I will be travelling with Mr.Capone so he can finish his Beginner Novice title. The second weekend I will be showing Mr. Presco in Rally Advanced. No travelling though. Also the mid-season finale of The Walking Dead is happening Sunday night too. So I will have a pretty busy Sunday.

I also have picked up a second job at a pet food store. I get a free 15lb bag of dog food a month and 15% discount on dog food, 30% discount on everything else in the store,which is awesome and will help out with us financially. I only work two or three nights a week. I don’t have to go back to that job until Wednesday night.

I still need to do a lot of things though, main thing is finish Christmas shopping. I also need to plan for 2017, dog shows, vacations, BDSM events. I’ve still been active in our local BDSM community. I have really made some great friends through that. Our community is so awesome. I still attend play parties, and monthly sub lunches. I still advocate that everyone try to become involved with their local community. I have a sub mom now, lol thats what I call her. She has been in the lifestyle with her Master/Husband for 15 years and she is mentoring me. Her Master isn’t mentoring Sir because he has just been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease but he said he will be around for any questions that Sir might have for him. I think having them will help us find our dynamic again. We implemented our first rule, I have to text him t 740 am every morning with a good morning text. We are starting out simple and slow. We will talk more about rules and new expectations when I get home. I have a feeling it probably won’t happen until after the holidays because we will be so busy. Sirs father is also in the hospital but he’s expected to be released the 22nd so he will be home for Christmas.

So…finally here’s the story. Me and Sir hit a very rough patch. I won’t get into the details but D/s and even our marriage almost ended. Its been a rough seven months. But we have decided to not give up on our marriage and D/s. 2017 will be the year we save our marriage. We are starting completely over with D/s, we both realized some major mistakes we made. I had unrealistic expectations for him and he wasn’t completely honest about how he was feeling about the whole thing. So we have decided to start completely over from scratch and go A LOT slower.

I wanted to come back to the blog to also document that things aren’t always rosy in the world of D/s we had a 7 month hiatus. So we start now, fresh and slower. So expect more posts from me documenting our journey.

As I write this I am in the hospital again. I had a Lupus flare up that left my legs so weak that I could not walk. I’ve been in the hospital for almost two weeks. I am starting to get strong again. Today I walked unassisted a small distance. I don’t think I’m ready to go home quite yet. Sir has been up here everyday. My doctors will make a decision on how much longer I will be here today.