Posts made in December, 2009

The year is about to end and I am thoroughly unprepared. Two thousand nine was spent tripping and grasping and pulling myself around for many months while I clutched at things that I was sure were slipping away. All I know now is that I’ve opened up my hands and given up all the striving but I’m still terribly preoccupied with the perception of it all. It’s why I’m writing so infrequently and why the words I put down here don’t make you want to comment. Sorry about that.

There were a whole lot of disappointments over these past couple of months, most of them having to do with illness preempting our trips to see you and for that I am still grieving. Getting out of the city where I live always gives me perspective and peace. I’m attempting to find both of those without a change in geography. It’s not that easy for someone who prefers to run. Fortunately, there have been even greater surprises of grace lately and they have not only sustained me but solidified my mind all the more. Stuff like quitting my job without knowing if the cash would run out while we were still hungry and waiting without panic or concern for the Lord to provide. He did. He is. He will. And in ways I would not have imagined.

Two thousand nine was the year we added Piper and got to know her sweet sweet self. It is the year Gideon started telling us what he thinks and how he feels. It is the year I nearly lost my mind and the one when I remembered Who had it all under control. It was filled with His goodness, marked by His love.