Items Mentioned in this Episode include:

Books, Courses and Training from Yad

[Angel Donovan]: Hey there, this is Angel Donovan with another episode of Dating Skills Podcast. Today we have Yad, who works in the London scene and has been around working with many companies, and in particular Daygame.com. And we just reviewed recently Daygame Blueprint from Daygame.com and we thought it was outstanding. It's now actually a top-ranked product on the program. So we're really glad to be talking with Yad a bit about his daygame exploits and the Daygame Blueprint. How are you doing, Yad?

[Yad]: Hey mate, thank you for hosting me all the way from London.

[Angel Donovan]: It's fantastic. Yeah, we're a bit far away from each other today. There's a lot of live footage in Daygame Blueprint. So one of the questions we have is like how important do you think it is for guys to watch someone doing a pickup to learn these sorts of skills themselves? Is it really an essential part and that's why you have so much infield footage? What are your ideas on this?

[Yad]: Yeah. I think show and prove, basically, and seeing is believing. You know, these are sayings that have sort of been handed down generation to generation for a reason. And seeing is believing. I think that you could read a lot, you could… And these things are things to do with the way our mind works in terms of evolution. So, I mean, reading is relatively new, like giving someone information in terms of evolution has less impact on your brain, on the part of the brain that spurs you into action than perhaps the visual aspects of life. So when you see something, like there's no question about it. You don’t doubt it, you're immediately galvanized by it, especially when it's something as inspirational as seeing a guy just walking around on his watch during the day and there's an amazing girl walking past him… And not one guy in this world hasn’t been in that situation, and sure we all look back and have a gander at what’s going on, but it's seeing that guy who makes that move and makes that connection, and you can clearly the girl’s bowled over.

And one amazingly refreshing thing about daygame, you know, the way we do it certainly in London, is it's very easygoing. Like there's no slimy tricks or anything. It's upfront, it's just in her face in a really refreshing manner. And the girl just takes it like Dr. Water, because they know what’s going on. They know the idea. It's funny how girls are always ready in terms of receiving men, in terms of knowing that they're being picked up and stuff like that.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So yeah, once I think a guy sees that visually, you know, that whole adage about a picture is a thousand words, all that stuff is very relevant to this question, I think.

[Angel Donovan]: Right, and I guess you do a lot of coaching in London as well, don’t you?

[Yad]: Yeah, yeah, I do, and all over the world, actually.

[Angel Donovan]: Okay. Okay. So one of the things I was thinking is like when guys are being coached, do you do a lot of demonstrations? Do you tend to do a lot of demonstrations? What kind of ratio do you normally do in your coaching sessions?

[Yad]: Hundred percent. I think what I tend to go for is 50-50 because, and at first, certainly at first, I take the guys in with me, because I've been teaching for almost four years now…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …and I've found nothing to be more impactful than having a guy stand next to me and me spewing out what I spew out normally in front of him with a girl there. And it doesn’t even matter how it goes. It doesn’t matter what the end result is. It's the vibe. It's the fact that it's washing over him. Here's a guy who’s been doing this on the streets of London and all over the world for seven years. And it's similar to any other activity. If I wanted to learn tennis, I’d want to go and play with a guy who’s been around the world and just watching him and just living with him and taking over… It's like, I really believe in this process called osmosis…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …you know, when you just naturally sort of feed off each other.

[Angel Donovan]: Right. Right, right.

[Yad]: Yeah. And my teaching is so much more effective when I cut down my words and I am just in there in the thick of it, with him there beside…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …me and he feels how easy it is, because a lot of them just can't believe how easy it is. So when they get the sense that, “Oh yeah, he just goes up to her and has a bit of banter, and all of a sudden she wants to talk and she opens up and she's joking around and she's coming out of her shell, because you're out of your shell,” and I genuinely believe your vibe as a man controls the vibe. So I think once the guy feels that, how strong and beautiful this thing can be, I think he's forever changed. I don’t have to say anymore after that, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm. Yeah, so you're breaking basically his frames of reality or what is possible.

[Yad]: Exactly, and which you can't do with explanations and words and, “Oh no, you should have done this, you should have done that.” To him it makes no sense. He's never done it before.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So when I give them that point of reference to begin with, and then the latter stages of the teaching become easier, you know, because they believe it now, so they’ll carry that in the set with them, that mentality.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah, I guess what I was thinking about also is that when the guys, if they're approaching themselves, they're so nervous that they're not paying attention to what’s going on. So in a way, watching you takes that pressure off and they can actually see what’s going on in a lot more detail maybe.

[Yad]: Yeah, and it's almost subconscious as well, you know. They see and feel everything, and it just goes in. It goes into your head somehow, and I think that's what makes the vital difference, you know.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm. So, I mean, London’s a big town. For guys who maybe live in smaller cities or towns where there isn't a huge amount of women they can practice on, how would you recommend they approach daygame if they are going to see a lot of the same women all the time and become known as that guy who is always trying to pick up women on the street?

[Yad]: Yeah, I suppose, you know, in London it's almost too much.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: London’s very unique. We're like the New York of Europe, I suppose. I think that's a good analogy because we have all of these people from all over Europe that want to go to London and live there and study and make a future for themselves.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: And what happens is it becomes a little bit too much sometimes, like especially where I started, where I cut my teeth, where and then subsequently all the other guys, all the other daygamers here in London now cut their teeth, is this part of London where it's so crazy. And a lot of the girls now, I mean, I was teaching yesterday, and I approached a model who was, I would think, especially my early days, perhaps unapproachable because I’d be too bowled over.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah, yeah.

[Yad]: It was this Dutch model, she'd just arrived like a few days ago and she was doing a few castings here in London, and I thought, “Well, that's a safe target for me because I don't think that the people who are out there practicing would approach here.” You know, they'd normally go for the girls who perhaps they consider to be available.

[Angel Donovan]: Right, right.

[Yad]: And it took me by such a surprise, she goes, “What is this? Is this a British thing?” She had this strong American accent. So she goes, “Is this a British thing? I've had this like five times in like 10 minutes.”

[Angel Donovan]: Wow. That's crazy. Where was it? Was it Covent Garden?

[Yad]: It was around… not far, like five minutes from Covent Garden, towards Tottenham Court Road area.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah. I have to admit, last summer I was in Covent Garden. I was just watching them, and there were these guys all over the place, and I thought it was a bit too much.

[Yad]: So, to give you an example, I've been to, say, Munich, which is about 3 million, I think, 3 million people in Germany.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: By the way, the girls are amazing in Munich. Any students listening or anyone listening to this podcast now, you've got to check out Munich. It's one of the most amazing cities. I don't know, but most guys, I mean… I love German girls, especially from Munich. It's like the Paris of Germany. They're very well-dressed and they look very good.

And now there I found to be the perfect balance, like a 2-million, 3-million city where things aren't very hectic, life is still a little bit nice and easy, but there's this spark to the city. So somewhere like that my results just shoot up because, firstly, it's not as crazy as London where everyone’s in a rush, everyone’s falling headlong into their work or whatever it is, the meeting they have to go to, and there are pickup artists everywhere. So somewhere like I would say… Yeah, so going back to your question, I think most countries would have a place like that, you know, 2 million, 3 million people where that is perfect, I would say, in terms of daygame.

[Angel Donovan]: Alright, alright. I mean, I guess if they have this situation, then maybe they want to be a bit more careful. I mean, if they're living in a really small town, say, a few hundred thousand, maybe they want to spread themselves around a bit to towns nearby and…

[Yad]: I wouldn't do it there.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: Like I grew up in a corner of London called Tottenham, and that’s, if we take it, because London’s so huge, we could say, “Okay, that's my little town in North London.” I would never do it there because, firstly, like you said, you're going to bump into certain people and stuff like that. Now, when I say I would never do it there, I mean practice. I would never practice there.

[Angel Donovan]: Right, right.

[Yad]: So I would recommend you go to a city that you have no sort of attachments to, you can just roam around, practice, have a bit of a laugh with everyone there, and safe in the knowledge that you can go back to your hometown and, you know…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: If you come from such a small town, I think it's best not to, you know… And you can't be too experimental, you know, because you're always thinking, “I'm going to see these people again.”

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: So, yeah, it kind of stymies your learning, I suppose. So yeah, I would highly recommend that they immigrate to, just for practice, for the whole day, you know, take a train out to that town for the whole day, and just start from there, really.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah. It'll be a lot easier on them as well because they won't be so nervous, because they're going to be really nervous if they think it's going to have a big social impact.

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: So a topic that wasn’t really touched on in Daygame Blueprint is fashion. Is it even important during the daytime? Do you find that guys do better when they dress up or do you think this makes the girls more guarded because it looks as if the guy’s going out with the intention of trying to pick up or something? What are your thoughts on that?

[Yad]: Yeah, I think you can't look too dapper. Now, if you're a French bloke in Paris…

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: …maybe you can get away with looking dapper, but certainly if you're in America, firstly, no diss, but the guys in America, you know, they're not exactly, like everyone I'm talking about…

[Angel Donovan]: [Laughs]

[Yad]: …they're not very, apart from some quarters of New York perhaps, they're not ultra, ultra into their fashion, let's say.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: But you get guys who I think they go too far the other way where they're dressed a little bit too rough perhaps, and certainly in my early days I used to walk around with glaringly Nike trainers just because it was comfortable and I was walking around for 10, 11, 12 hours sometimes, you know, roaming around London. And so that perhaps helped, but I think I was always conscious that things matched and just I think looking decent. I think that's the word, looking decent. Just showing a few bits here and there that you care is important. But at the same time, as I said, you don’t want to look too dapper to the point where she clearly can tell you've come out to do this.

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: And funnily enough, some of my best sets have been when I go jogging around, I don't know if you know Hyde Park Regent’s Park area…

[Angel Donovan]: Totally, totally.

[Yad]: So I go jogging around these parks and, you know, there's a hot girl there most of the time who's just a tourist checking out London, and I just go up to her and in my slacks, but obviously it's in the context of, oh, I tell her I've just been jogging, I live around the corner, I'm going to… You know, it obviously comes up in the conversation. But that has always gone well, funnily enough.

[Angel Donovan]: I've got ideas about that because whenever I come out of the gym and I'm sweaty…

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: …I'm nasty, and, you know, guaranteed I’ll be walking alone and some girls will start noticing me and I’ll walk up, and it's just kind of that special moment. I think it's something to do with the testosterone boost around like exercise or something like that as well…

[Yad]: Yes, yes…

[Angel Donovan]: …because they don't know about the clothes at all or the fact you're all sweaty and nasty.

[Yad]: No. Like you said, you're high on that feeling as well.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: At the same time, you're feeling like great and stuff inside, and like you said, it really doesn’t matter like then what… Girls aren't very visual about the thing. They're just not very visual beings. They are visual to a certain extent, but just not like us. And what happens is a lot of men who lack perhaps empathy skills, what they do is they project their views on life on women…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …and they sort of go the way of, “Oh well, I'm not good-looking enough,” or stuff like that, and if anyone’s a testament to not being good-looking enough and getting away with girls who are perhaps well out of my league, it's me, here in London. I mean, certainly because I've developed this feeling that, like you said, it's that post-gym feeling of euphoria, and it's constantly there with daygame. Daygame is kind of like a social gym because you're going out there, your tongue’s wagging, your brain’s like on full power, you're talking to people, and say by the end of like two, three hours, if you're constantly doing that, then you're feeling high. You're feeling great, especially if you've had a few days at work where you're on your laptop and you've not had a chance to communicate with people.

And what’s great about daygame, ultimately, perhaps when you first warm up, it doesn’t have to be exactly people you want to talk about, but ultimately it's people who you choose. And now, like when I go out to London, I literally don’t speak to… or when I go out onto the streets anyway, I'm in such an amazing place where I choose the sort of people I have in my life, you know.

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: And all that, it's such a rush, and it just snowballs and snowballs and snowballs. So I have a good week, and then obviously that snowballs to the next week and, you know, things just snowball, vibe just snowballs, and yeah, like you said, it's that same exhilaration. And I think, going back to the question of how to dress and stuff, yeah, as I just said, as long as you appropriately dress, whether you're going to the gym or you're going out to have a little wander, but you're nicely dressed, you pay a bit of attention…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …and you don’t stink to high heavens, then I think you're well in with a shot, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: That's great, that's great. Good roundup there. Well, because you're meeting a woman when she is alone and none of her friends can see her, do you think this lets most girls be more sexually adventurous as there are fewer social consequences? Like Alex Love talks about this in a program a bit. He says a girl’s number one priority is protecting her social value. Is she likely to feel there is less risk of judgment during the day as no one will find out, and do you find this is magnified even more when you or the girl are on holidays and there's no chance you'll see each other again?

[Yad]: Yeah, that's definitely… I mean, you live in Thailand, so like you're surrounded by that vibe, aren't you?

[Angel Donovan]: Totally, and yeah, you see it every day.

[Yad]: Yeah, and it's completely, you know, that high of going away and having this anonymity, especially if someone’s grown up around an area where most people know them and stuff, yeah. But at the same time, we've got to remember that these girls are also thinking of their social group in the long-term. So when we're going up to a girl and when we're giving an account of ourselves, she's thinking, “Can I introduce this guy to my peer group?”

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: You see, there's that thought as well. So, you know, when those thoughts are… Sure, if you get her on a day and she might go further than usual…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: But at the same time I think there's always the judgment of… because she wants to go home and tell her girlfriends about you.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: And the times that it's gone well, I can tell that a girl would introduce me to a social group. It's never gone well and she doesn’t want to introduce me to a social group. The fact that she likes me, she's excited about all these adventures we're going to have together, including the ones that we might have with her friends. So perhaps yeah, maybe on the first or second date that might help in terms of having a little bit like, “I’ll go, and then let's go and do this,” or she might want to go further than she usually does.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: But I think ultimately she is thinking about, “Can I introduce this guy to my friends?” you know?

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah, yeah. You used the word adventure a couple of times, and when I got into this 10 years ago, the only reason I really got into it was because I read about some guy in Japan and he was having some adventures because he was going around during the day and was meeting people, and he would have these fantastic stories. And I just thought, “Wow, this is something exciting, adventurous,” and at the time I needed some more of that in my life. So, you know, I don't know if you want to recount a couple of stories or something, but during the daygame, I think it can be a lot more adventurous and interesting and exciting for the women as well, because often it's not something that's happened to them, especially when you insta-date them, right? And so one second she's going somewhere in the street, the next second you're both going off somewhere else, and the rest of the day is all completely something that she would have never thought would happen, right? So you just grab her out of reality. So is adventure something that you'd be really interested in about this? Would you think that's something that the girls really enjoy about the daygame aspect versus meeting some guy in a club?

[Yad]: Oh yeah, hundred percent. Like that word is so crucial. I mean crucial all throughout literally from north point north north to the end of your relationship.

[Angel Donovan]: [Laughs]

[Yad]: That word is so adventurous, and spontaneous perhaps.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: These are key, key words. Key, key words. If you don’t have this about your vibe, and I know it sounds a bit vague and stuff to say that, but I'm talking… We all know kind of what we mean, this sense of like, “I want to try something different.” Or, say, if you've never had sushi before, the day you just go, “Oh, sod it, I’ll just go and try sushi. I’ll just eat a bit of raw fish for the first time. Who cares?” is that kind of day where you just feel like you just want to do something new, dip your toe in a new thing. And you know, those are the days where all my interactions go really well, funnily enough.

[Angel Donovan]: Right. I guess you've found like… I’ll give you an example here, is like when you're traveling, right?

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: There's this adventurous vibe you have yourself, you're like you're on an adventure, you don't know where you are, don't know much about it. I always found that that always went much better for me. How about you?

[Yad]: Yeah, hundred percent, because we're immediately in that vibe I suppose. I mean, it's much harder to come out of the office and immediately get into that vibe. That's why you’ve got to find your own path sometimes into good daygame.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So for some people, they’ve got to hit the gym. I've got a mate who just can't do daygame without hitting the gym first.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: But that works for him.

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: And who am I to say that that’s—that's an amazing option to have to hit the gym for an hour, feel all these amazing testosterone and endorphins running through your body, and that gives you a sense of adventure in itself, and it just gets you ready to hit the streets. So that kind of thing, if you can just find whatever works for you, it might be playing a computer game, it might be listening to your favorite album, whatever it is, get yourself in that mood.

But you know, the best thing I've found is going up and just making people’s day. So when you go up to a girl or when you go up to even like a couple or whatever it is, to give an extreme example…

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: Just say, “Hey guys, I just noticed that you guys make an amazing couple. Have an amazing date!” Go up to a couple of old women, just say, “Guys, I just love your style! I had to say that. You guys remind me of like Sex in the City characters. This is great!”

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: Stuff like that, it just gets you… And you leave. There doesn’t have to be any attachment to it. And doing stuff like that, certainly, you won't believe the change from going to perhaps coming out of the office and feeling a little bit down in the mouth to taking it to another level where you're completely being social and high on life. And that can happen within an hour or two. It's a remarkable change that can happen.

And you know, those things we were talking about, being adventurous and spontaneous, is what gets girls going. The opposites of that, predictability, you know, perhaps just monotony, all these things, girls just like shrivel up at. And I've gotten away with insane things just wrapping around adventure. And even my conversations when I'm in… there's always a tinge of adventurous and spontaneousness to it.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So I’ll be like, the questions I’d ask at first, in the first half an hour and stuff, would never be staid and monotonous perhaps. It would always be like, “Oh, so what’s your favorite food?” “Where have you traveled?” Those sorts of questions, for example. Talk about spontaneous stuff, and that kind of leads it to a spontaneous atmosphere between you. And yeah, so those things are so crucial, man.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah, yeah, I totally agree with you. And you've given a lot of good examples there, so I think everyone on the podcast should have a very good idea of what you're talking about there. So this one’s a bit more personal. You've often talked about how when you first got started with this you were overweight and you had bad acne and so on.

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: How much of a difference did you notice in a girl’s initial reaction to you when you got yourself in better shape and improved your appearance? How much of that do you think is simply because you looked better versus you now feeling better about yourself and giving off a more positive energy?

[Yad]: Okay, well, firstly, when I first started out, there was no such thing as daygame in London. So I was like this kid who just graduated from university and, you know, I don't know if it's the same in the rest of the world, but in England, when you graduate from university, you kind of lose all the people that you've hung out with for three years. Everyone’s kind of going their own direction now. Everyone’s looking for jobs. A lot of them move back to their home counties and they're living with their parents for a while till they can get onto their own feet and use their education. So I was in that moment where I was a bit depressed. I’d lost all my social life, and it was a year of just being a little bit like, “Ugh, what am I doing?” My grades weren't that good. I didn't want to do what I studied and that kind of thing. So I was really depressed actually. And it was beautiful when the game came along. It gave my life a bit of a purpose, you know.

I’d never had acne, funnily enough, but the reason I got acne was, in the first year or two, it was so stressful. I found out it was all stress-related. And it was so stressful doing it because, as I said, now there's so much on daygame out there, but I'm talking about late 2005, 2006, that kind of era when daygame wasn’t really a thing, you know, as it is now. And I was so like just fumbling around for ways to sort of come up with techniques and stuff and not getting anywhere most days, and it was so stressful to the point where I developed really bad acne.

But what I remember… and I was overweight, and obviously I’d eat as well because I was depressed, so I was very much overweight. And I just didn't have a cool lifestyle like I do now. I was living with my parents. I just graduated. I didn't have much life experience. Now, I'm a much wiser man, shall we say.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: But so when I was going around the streets of London, I was feeling a little bit like this and that. Sure there were days where I would just have, like I said, you that high I was talking about…

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: …two, three hours going out, and I’d get this high, this shot of like endorphins in my brain, and funnily enough, I can't say much has changed, right? In terms of how I feel inside.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So there might be a minute 1% in terms of how I looked then. Because I always kind of dressed okay.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: I always paid a bit of attention. I do pay attention a lot more now, but what I'm saying is essentially, I still remember, there was one day when I had such a bad, horrible spot like on my lower jaw that I grew a beard…

[Angel Donovan]: [Laughs]

[Yad]: …to sort of disguise it. Because I just couldn't wait to go out. I couldn't wait for the spot blemish to go away. And it was really big, and there were a few of them. I think I was so stressed out. I was just like doing my body a lot of damage. But hopefully, apparently, coming out in spots is not a big deal. It's just your way of getting rid of a lot of… your body’s way of getting rid of rubbish, basically.

And so I looked absolutely terrible, but I’d not been out for a week. I kept waiting for these… So I had all this energy and I had all this like wanting-to-be-social energy, and I still remember, I had one of my best days, even till now, you know, because I went out and I was completely like uncaring. I was just happy to be social, funnily enough.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: I wasn’t expecting anything. I was looking the worst I've ever looked, I've got to say, you know, and it was just me, glasses, big beard, big hair, spots the rest of the bits of skin you can see, but it was just like, I was just on cloud nine because I’d not been out for a week and I'd been reading a little bit about pickup and visualizing. So I was visualizing what could happen and stuff. Because I was in the midst of it. I was so addicted to it.

And you know, now, if I have a similar day but look the same, perhaps yeah, a few more girls might stop than they did or they’d give me an easier time perhaps, but I can't even imagine that because, as I said, I just feel girls on that visual because they get lost in your energy. When your energy’s that strong, they just get lost in it. So I just, you know… And now, sometimes, I look, compared to that guy, just based on aesthetics, I look so much better, but I have off days where not a single girl stops in an hour. So I could approach 10 girls and not one of them would want to stop and talk to me. Guess what? I'm not in the right mindset.

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: I'm thinking about something else, I'm a bit stressed out, and I'm doing it for a bit of value gaming.

[Angel Donovan]: What’s value gaming?

[Yad]: It's kind of like, “Okay, I need a good response from a girl to make me feel better,” right?

[Angel Donovan]: I see. Right.

[Yad]: Yeah. It comes from that place. It doesn’t come from a place of, “Wow, I feel so great today and I just want to like go out and have fun.” So I'm looking to gain value from that girl.

[Angel Donovan]: Right, right.

[Yad]: I'm not giving that girl any value back.

[Angel Donovan]: Right. And we've talked about earlier about a few ways that you can get into the right mindset, you know, the things you've brought… like going to the gym, one of your buddies, or where you yourself, you just go out and give people compliments and so on to get yourself in the right state, right?

[Yad]: Yeah. Yeah. I think most places in the world would now have a mall, right?

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: They hire these girls that work in malls, for example, because they're very bright and chatty, the salesgirls with the perfumes and stuff. And you just go up to them and just like ask them about Britney Spears’ love life or whatever. It doesn’t matter.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: What I'm saying is it's like, if you're going into a gym, you don’t go for the 50k weight straight away unless you're some sort of Schwarzenegger.

[Angel Donovan]: Okay. [Laughs]

[Yad]: But you start off with the lighter stuff and you work your way up. And it's that kind of mentality you should have when you go out and do daygame. You just go, “Right, my brain just needs to kick into gear, so I'm just going to do a better this, do a better that, have a bit of fun here,” and it's always fun conversations, you know? You could do opinion openers with shop girls. You could do going up to girls just giving them a compliment. And if you're crippled with anxiety, ask for directions. You have to start off somewhere.

[Angel Donovan]: Totally.

[Yad]: You know?

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah. You can make it easier for yourself, you know, and you don’t have to make it so hard. You can start in little steps, as you said. Just ask for directions and it gets your…

[Yad]: Exactly. Exactly. And there's no set way. There's no, “Oh, I should be at this level. I should be doing this.” There's none of that, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: Right, right. Because, I mean, it's basically guys doing this to themselves. It's like their ego, their pride, especially if they’ve been doing this for a while…

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: …a year or whatever, and they feel that maybe their buddies are better than them or that they should be better by now, or they’ve been reading on the forums everyone’s so good and they can start to feel bad about themselves. So I think this is pressure that they put on themselves and, you know…

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: …it's something bad that is holding them back.

[Yad]: Yes, you're so right, man. And that's what keeps a lot of normal guys from exploring this amazing thing, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: Like a lot of normal guys would just perhaps dismiss something like daygame because they’ll be like, “Well, no, I don’t need to go up to a girl on the street and try and chat her up.”

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: Oh really, mate? Well, you just go home and have a wank on the laptop. Is that better?

[Yad]: So I think just the fact… You've got to pat yourself on the back for setting your ego aside to the point where you're now doing this. And I think the hardest bit is when people do it for a year or two, then they get a little bit like the ego shoots up from all the highs they get, and you've always got to be careful of the ego, I think. Always.

[Angel Donovan]: Totally. Especially, I mean, I think one of the worst situations is where you got into it, you got relatively good, then you got a girlfriend, and then the girlfriend broke up with you for whatever reason…

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: And now you're kind of starting from a point where you've lost some of the experience, some of the vibe you have, but you've got your ego, which is saying that you're better than this and you should be able to do this, and then you can get yourself in a bit of a hole.

[Yad]: Yeah, exactly, because it can come out of nowhere and just hinder you, I think. So you've always got to watch out for… I mean, even now, someone like me who’s gone from this kid who just runs around the streets to a guy who’s now celebrated in London as the best in stuff, and I just can't let stuff like that get into my ego, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: A lot of the girls you date are ridiculously hot Eastern European girls…

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: …to the point that other guys who see you together probably assume you're filthy rich or have a powerful job or some other externally-based reason for being with these women.

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: What is it really though that you think these women are most attracted to? Do you think you would have had the same success with quality girls if you were only approaching them in bars and clubs where there is more competition and they can be more defensive?

[Yad]: Well, firstly, going back to my point, I find that usually what happens is hot girls are much more receptive to daygame. That is such an amazing thing to, firstly, discover, and secondly, to know and to tell guys about it, because it's so illogical. Just like there's this thing called the Yad Stop, a lot of stuff that I've discovered in game is quite illogical, certainly compared to what we've been told what we should do, i.e. get drunk, go out to a nightclub, and stuff like that. But in terms of like the Yad Stop, I don't know if guys know about this, but it's just jumping right in front of the girl and just saying hello, and it's the most effective way of doing daygame now.

[Angel Donovan]: [Laughs]

[Yad]: Everyone’s doing it in London. But it's so illogical. You see a guy, if I told you what I do is, right, I go up to… I go out onto the streets and I basically jump in front of girls and then take them for a coffee, and then you know, perhaps that day or another day I take them back to my bedroom, they're like, “Are you nuts? You just jump in front of them?” But that’s the way it works.

And if I tell them, right, the hotter the girl, the easier. They’ll be so incredulous. Because, firstly, the reason hot girls are easier is because they're not firstly used to a guy speaking to them in a nice, normal, happy-go-lucky way. They're just not used to that a lot. Secondly, they're much more well-adapted socially.

So if a hot girl’s walking around and she sees all these pictures in magazines and billboards and stuff that says, “Wow, you're hot, you have amazing value in society and you're a powerful being, people are going to appreciate you,” and stuff like that, “You're aesthetically pleasing,” and obviously she has a bit of social life for that reason, a lot of people treat her much nicer, i.e. she has a nicer outlook on life because she's more social and blah, blah, blah, blah. And I mean that's not the case like a hundred percent, but certainly I would say upwards of 90%, that's the case.

And you know, I think these girls just find it so refreshing when you're just going up to them and talking to them like a mate. And, yeah, like, I mean don’t… I should point out I don’t exclusively date Eastern European girls. They just happen to be some of the hottest girls in London. And I was staying… I mean, a lot of your people might know a guy called Gambler. I was staying with Gambler in Moscow and in some of the… He invited me out to these countries in Eastern Europe. And when I went there, yeah, sure, the average girl does look hotter and stuff like that. But you know, as I said, one of my favorite cities is Munich, and the mentality is very different there. They're not so… It's a different range of girls, but what strikes me is girls are girls.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: Like whether it's a poor Russian girl who does perhaps like money more than the German girl as the German girl owns… her dad owns an estate in Munich, say, they still have all the qualities and they still want all those qualities in a man, which are so universal, you know, the idea of a guy who is an alpha but yet sensitive, but yet adventurous, yet a little bit grounded. Do you see what I mean?

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah.

[Yad]: All those things… Yeah, they all look for it. And yeah, so it doesn’t… Like when I walk into these places, sure, with like a stunning Russian girl, obviously, every other guy is thinking, I look a bit Italian, so probably like, “A rich Italian or so and so.” So yeah, I can tell. I can tell that that's what they're thinking. But that's their reality. You can't pay attention to that.

But what’s great about daygame is it cuts through all these social boundaries, you know. Normally, to me, the sort of… I met this Czech girl who’s a model recently, and to me, just as an example, and we went on an instant date and we had the most amazing time. She had the best eyes I've ever looked into, like these big, amazing like deep blue. They went on for eternity. You could just stare into them. And I just enjoyed that instant date so much, and I was just thinking, “This is crazy.” Like to meet her normally, I would have to be… Like she goes to Milan to do fashion shows and stuff, and unless you're some sort of Ferrari-owning millionaire, you're not going to even come into contact with her, you know?

So society has set up all these rules for us, obviously, and normal guys then think, “Oh, well, I need that Ferrari to get into contact with that girl to hopefully have a shot with her.” But when they do get the Ferrari and blah, blah, they find out they really don’t have the social skills to get her, and all she cares about is a guy who gives her adventure. She's still a girl. Like material things are important, but they're just not instinctively important, you know? They're logically important. Instinctively, she'll go off with the poor guy who gives her an adventure and bang his brains out, and then go off with the rich guy perhaps logically in the future when she needs to settle down.

[Angel Donovan]: Yeah, totally. I was going to say that, you know, when it comes to serious relationships, do you think the same dynamic takes place or do the social elements… Because, I mean, for instance, you know, I'm in Asia, so in some instances, especially in Japan for instance, a Japanese girl is not going to settle down with a foreigner unless she's pretty open and outgoing, just because they’ve got very socially strict rules in that country and this is not what’s done, right? So do you think, you know, based on your experience, that for relationships, certain stages of relationships, it starts to matter or from the beginning or does it take place at all?

[Yad]: Well, I really don't think in the beginning, especially in terms of daygame. This is why I love it so much.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: I trust daygame so much because it's so raw, right? I feel when the girl loves me and likes me for who I am.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: When I'm being a beautiful man right in front of her and I'm being this adventurous guy with like lots of witty things to say and just has a fun vibe about him, I can feel that… And when she comes for a coffee with me, I feel she's there not because of anything else but because of me. I genuinely feel that.

Now, sure, later on it would be so nice to reveal things like, “Oh, I could just take you to Miami for two weeks and we could just have a bit of a laugh there,” sure, things like that are amazing, but I know that's not why she's with me. And I can't imagine a better thing that daygame because even the clubs in London, a lot of the guys that go into them, they have to buy a table. So it's that thing of getting access to these girls. And if a girl likes me because I'm in a certain club and a certain table, I'm never really going to be that satisfied, to be honest. It's not gratifying. But what’s really gratifying is knowing she just loves you for who you are, and everything else is a bonus. And sure, those bonuses do matter in the long run, I would say.

[Angel Donovan]: You know, I've never thought about it that way. Thanks a lot, man, because that is a really, really interesting perspective and really valuable, you know? It's totally right. When it's in daygame or when you're just meeting her, how do you say, by serendipity?

[Yad]: Yeah.

[Angel Donovan]: She's really just looking at you. She's not looking at all the other social constructs around her or anything else.

[Yad]: No. That's why I love it so… It's just so naked and raw, daygame.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: And it's harsh as well as beautiful in terms of the fact that the decision is made within a minute or two on her part. And like you said, it's based purely on your energy as a man, you know.

[Angel Donovan]: So your approach as you demonstrate in Daygame Blueprint, it's pretty understated in that you often just kind of tell the girl that she looks nice and you wanted to meet her or something like that. Have you found this works better than like saying she's cute, sexy, beautiful, or is it just simply more your style?

[Yad]: Yeah. No, I think those words really become a little bit irrelevant. They're not as important as people… the amount of importance people attach to them, because I think, like we said, like when a girl sees you—this is what I believe. This is how I visualize it, I think, all throughout my doing daygame…

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: …is she sees this… Her emotions make up a hologram of you, right?

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So when you enter her vibe, when you jump in front of her and say, “Hey, can I just tell you something?” And I think the words just become like, “Da da da da, da da da da…”

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: And now she basically just sees a hologram of your energy. A hologram is like being developed of your beautiful emotions and how much you just are in the moment and how much you're just loving life right now, and she just gets sucked into that hologram. She just can't… Like she's, “Wow, okay, I don’t care what you're saying, but this is great,” you know?

And the reason I say a very simple sentence is because I know it's not based around the sentence. I know she's not listening to what I'm saying. So that's why I just go over and say, “Hey, I just saw you and I had to come over and say, I just thought you look really nice.” And “really nice” just provides a very easygoing sort of base, you know? And from there you can develop it. From there, you could go, “I love your style, I like this, I like that.”

But it's all about how you say it, man. It's all about your delivery, it's all about how you feel inside, much more than these little words here and there, you know?

[Angel Donovan]: Totally, totally. Thanks for all of this. Now, the last question I'm going to give you is what we give everyone, which is basically, what are the top three things you would tell someone who’s just starting today? He hasn’t studied anything or done anything yet. What are the top three things you would tell him to do to get started and to get good at this quickly?

[Yad]: Okay, stop basically sitting at home and making these excuses about “one more book or one more chapter or one more YouTube video and it'll make me a better man.” Nothing makes you a better man than experience.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: All about life experience. So just go out there and experience things, even if it is just something new and unexpected you want to do. So say you want to go to a scriptwriting class or just like take up tennis, just do something that is related to life experience. These things all add to your life. And in terms of daygame, certainly, like, as I mentioned before, just going up, and even if you're crippled with anxiety, you can at least ask for directions.

So yeah, I think a lot of guys have got this syndrome where they just sit at home and they just think, “Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, just I'm not ready yet. I need another six months and this'll happen.” And it won't. You've just got to go out there and do it. Nothing beats experience. So that's the first thing, I think.

And secondly, I think it's maybe like going back to that point, like don’t judge yourself too harshly.

[Angel Donovan]: Mm-hmm.

[Yad]: So I would say the first hundred approaches, I wouldn't even judge myself. I wouldn't even think about how I did. So I'm talking the first day, you go out, you do 10, you don’t even think about it. And then the next day, you go out, you do 20, you don’t even think about it. Because changes happen. Changes happen, but incrementally. Very incrementally. And if you let it, if you just enjoy it and appreciate what it is, after a hundred approaches, you can then sit back and go, “Right, okay. Now I've got a sense of things.” That's when your judgments and judging yourself will actually make a bit of sense.

And thirdly—I think it's so underrated—you have to enjoy it. You have to have fun.

[Angel Donovan]: Right.

[Yad]: You know? If you're not having fun, if you're not genuinely enjoying, don’t do it out of necessity or out of having to get the girl’s number and stuff like that. That's never beautiful, and it will just give you a bad idea of interacting with girls, where it's just, if you could just keep in mind, “Am I having fun? Is this fun for the girl? Are we having fun?” then you'll go a long way.

[Angel Donovan]: Some great points there and a great way to finish the podcast, man. Thanks for being on the show today. It's been great having you, and I hope to catch up with you soon sometime.

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DSR Podcast is a weekly podcast where Angel Donovan seeks out and interviews the best experts he can find from bestselling authors, to the most experienced people with extreme dating lifestyles. The interviews were created by Angel Donovan to help you improve yourself as men - by mastering dating, sex and relationships skills and get the dating life you aspire to.

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