09/11/2010

Amy and Bella: two girls connected by September 11

Amy doesn't know that her father became Bella's hero for a brief shining time.

The connecting threads of 9-11

Amy Gardner is a high school senior today. So is Bella.

They were both just 9 when two bombs disguised as planes crashed into the World Trade Center towers. Amy's dad Thomas was a firefighter with FDNY, Engine Company 59.

He was one of the ones who ran up the stairs to help when everyone else was running in the opposite direction.

He never came back down.

Sometimes we idealize our heroes, make them perfect and shiny and good. And when we do that, they become more of an icon and less of a living, breathing, human with hopes, loves and fears like the rest of us.

Amy's dad liked to take the family canoeing and hiking. He loved animals and volunteered for a wildlife rescue organization.

He was full of contradictions.

He was studying to be a science teacher, but he also performed comedy on a Long Island radio station and had sold some jokes to Joan Rivers and Phyllis Diller. He played hockey on a local team. And he gave time to the Bronx Zoo, walking excited kids through the exhibits.

Amy's dad was doing what he loved the day he died: helping others.

Who is Bella and how is she connected to Amy?

Amy lost a father on September 11 and Bella gained a hero.

Bella (not her real name) was the little girl I was mentoring when the 9-11 tragedy unfolded.

Some of you have read this story. Some of you have not.

But looking at it through the lens of this particular year has helped me see that these girls are still connected.

Because this is the year both Amy and Bella will graduate from high school. Both have lost fathers, Amy through 9-11 and Bella through divorce.

Here is Bella's story again, nine years after the day that changed forever how we see our world. If you have read Bella's story, please pass it on to someone who hasn't .

Because we must never forget.

A September 11 story

It was the day after the day.

September 12, 2001 was a Wednesday. I know because Wednesday was my mentoring day.

I swung into the parking lot of the elementary school not far from Seattle.

My friend was a smart, but troubled 9-year-old. I'll call her Bella. She was in the gifted class.

Bella loved to read. I brought her my old comics, like Little Lulu. She read them out loud and laughed hysterically at the strong, spunky Lulu. We made bracelets out of plastic jewelry and waved our hands at each other to see who could make the loudest clicking sound.

We played board games. Once she tried to teach me chess but she gave up. I could never figure out what move to make and she got tired of waiting. Sometimes Bella would come into the library, sit down and frown, arms crossed, swinging her legs. On those days, she didn't want to talk to anyone, not even me.

On this particular Wednesday, Bella was quiet. She sat down, took out the set of blocks and started building, her tongue sticking out in concentration.

"What are you making?" I said.

"Towers," she said, keeping her eyes on the blocks.

My heart did a flip. She continued adding blocks until she had two blue buildings, side by side. She gently pulled out blocks on each side, about three-quarters from the top of each tower, so there were perfectly square holes on all sides.

Then she did an astounding thing. She lifted a black crayon, holding it with the thumb and forefinger. She made it climb, turn, then slowly push through the empty space, from one side of the tower right through the other side and onto the library table.

"See?" she said.

"If they just would have made the towers this way, with holes in the sides, the plane could have gone right through. And no one would have been hurt. Why didn't they make them that way?"

She frowned.

I swallowed. I didn't have any words.

Bella punched the buildings with her fist. The blocks fell across the table and crashed onto the floor.

As the weeks went by, in my Wednesdays with Bella, we talked more about the terrorist attacks. She asked why the firefighters had to go in those burning buildings. She wanted to know if any kids died.

I told her the truth. I felt like she needed to know.

She said she never wanted to go on an airplane again. She walked out of the library, down the hall to her classroom.

I stood in the fierce Manhattan sun, in a line that wound down four blocks and around another two. Just as I got to the fence with its mementos and massive butcher paper wall, with thousands of messages of hope and sorrow scrawled every which way, I saw him.

He wore brown overalls, a blue shirt with an embossed fire department insignia and a navy blue baseball cap with red letters: FDNY. His name was JJ, from Engine 299, Queens. His eyes widened as I told him about Bella. I handed the letter and photo to him.

"Wow," he said. "Tell her these are going up at the station." He waved the letter and photo.

"She wants your autograph," I said.

"Are you kidding?"

No, I said, it was the only thing she wanted me to bring back from New York.

He took the paper and wrote,

Dear Bella,

Thank you for being so kind and thoughtful.

Your Friend,

J.J. Kerns

Then he reached behind the fence and pulled out an FDNY hat. "Give this to Bella," he said. "Tell her it's from me."

The next Wednesday, Bella was sitting on a chair in the library waiting for me.

"I brought you something from my trip," I said.

I handed her J.J.'s photo and note, which I had framed. Her eyes got big.

"Cool!" she said, jumping out of her seat as if I had just brought her the biggest, softest teddy bear from FAO Schwartz.

I reached into my bag and pulled out the FDNY cap. Her face sagged. She grabbed the cap and put it on. It made her look goofy, the way it covered her ears and most of her eyes. I helped her adjust the tab in the back.

Bella stood up. "I want to go back to my class now, " she said.

She pushed the bill of the cap down and peered out at me.

I smiled. "Sure."

I watched her skip down the hall, pumping her arm in the air.

One horrific day. And four and a half months and 3,000 miles later, a genuine, heartfelt connection between a nine-year-old girl and her hero.