Captain Slow has cashed in his Range Rover and picked himself up 1.2L petrol- powered Fiat Panda in the interest of saving England from what he feels is the biodiesel scourge. You see, the estimable Mr. May doesn't like the look of British biodiesel's prime ingredient: oilseed rape.

"From 2,500 feet I can see quite vividly just how much of the sceptred isle is being given over to this unutterably crap crop, and believe me it's quite a lot. The only possible benefit I can conceive of is that soon I'll finally be able to find my way back to the airfield, because it will be the only bit of the whole country that's still green."

And as Clarkson's the Little Englander and Hammond's the Modern Englander, it only makes sense that May's Olde Englander would come up with this particular rationale for buying an econobox. – Davey G. Johnson