A few years ago my husband was asked to speak at a Pastor’s/Wives weekend. One evening, when all of the wives were gathered together, I had a chance to talk with them about how they felt about their “calling”. Did they view being a Pastor’s wife as a burden or a blessing, or perhaps a mixture of both? Did they see the leadership that God had given them as an opportunity or as a poorly chosen gift, like those ugly Christmas socks Grandma gave them when they were kids? The conversation was riddled with comments that revealed either an uneasiness with the idea that their role is any different from any other family or a settled bitterness at what ministry had taken from them over the years. We talked about the challenges of living lives that seem to attract so much “feedback”. We talked about being a skillful shepherd when the sheep are insisting on wallowing in the mud. Whether they liked it or not, God had placed them in a unique spot. A place where people looked to them to see a picture of Jesus. They needed to decide whether they would seek to be a reflection of Him to all those who were looking. They needed to decide whether to fight the calling – or embrace it.

Since that time, I’ve taken every opportunity to help women in ministry (including pastor’s wives) to embrace their callings. To see the people that come to their doors, literally, as opportunities to speak words of life and to be Jesus’ hands to those that are hurting. They may come to their doors because of a position they’ve been given or their husband has been given. But it really doesn’t matter why they come. They are there, hoping to see what Jesus is like, from someone who knows Him.

Maybe you can identify with the woman who told me she just wanted to sneak out the back door of church and never come back. Maybe this life of ministry has been hard. If you have been in it for any time at all, I can almost guarantee that you have your share of war wounds. But those wounds don’t have to become scars. Jesus is in the process of healing. And Jesus wants “to bind up the wounded” and help you to see this life He has called you to with fresh eyes, with His eyes.

Maybe you are new to this gig. You are wondering what it looks like to lead from the heart, with authenticity and wisdom (yes, they can co-exist). You long to see Jesus use your life – and make it count. But it gets so complicated. And walking alongside hurting people….well, it hurts.

This is a place to find refreshment for your soul and tools for your hands. It’s a place that will, I hope by God’s grace, help you to embrace the calling that God has put on your life and help you to lead from a place that is being continually filled by your relationship with Your Savior, to help you lead from the heart.

About Coletta Smith

I’m so glad you are here! I hope you’ll find our time together refreshing and invigorating. My name is Coletta Smith. I’ve been a Pastor’s wife for 23 years now – and I love it. I haven’t loved every moment of it – and that’s some of what has motivated me to create this blog – there are a lot of struggles that are unique to ministry and pastor’s families.