Tears

She was taken to the hospital at four a.m. After many long months of
waiting, After many sleepless nights, while she lay in bed and pictured
what her child was going to be, it was finally time. Would it be a girl
with red hair and look like it's mamma or would it be more like it's
daddy, a little boy with brown hair and dark brown eyes. Well, it was
finally time. In just a little while she would have her child in her
arms.

She lay there in that hospital bed for what seemed like an eternity but
finally her child was born. The doctor looked at her and said,
"Congratulations, it's a boy." With a sudden surge of panic she cried
out, is he OK? Why isn't he crying? I thought he was supposed to cry! I
don't hear him!! Is he OK?!!! The nurse took her by the hand and told her
to calm down. She told her that her son was just fine. She said that they
don't always cry. The lady took her son in her arms, hugged him close,
and whispered in his ear, "You're OK Derrik. You're OK."

Derrik grew up like most other boys except for one difference. He never
cried. When he was two weeks old his mom and dad took him back to the
doctor. They told him Derrik never cries. Not once in two weeks. Not when
he is hungry. Not when he needs changing. Not when he wakes up during the
night. Never. The doctor just looked at them and laughed. "I know
hundreds of parents who wish they had a child that never cries. Consider
yourselves lucky.", he said. So they took Derrik home.

They loved Derrik very much and raised him just like any other child only
he still never cried. Not once did he even shed a tear. While he was
teething and his little gums hurt. Not the time when he was learning to
walk and fell on the sidewalk and skinned his knee until it bled. Not
when he was four and got dog bit. No he went the first five years without
a tear.

Well, even the doctors thought that five years without crying was unusual
so the decided to run some test. They checked his tear ducts, glands and
eyes. No problem there. They checked his nerves and nerve endings. Still
nothing. They ran weeks worth of tests, brought in specialists and
finally decided, there was nothing wrong! He just never cried.

He continued through his life every day just like all of the rest. He had
a dog that he had raise from a puppy. He loved it and played with it
every day. One morning before school, Derrik went out to give his dog
some food and water. He found it lying in the dog house dead. Where most
children would have cried, he never did. Al of his emotions just staid
inside.

Derrik continued to grow and in his early twenties he met a young lady
and fell in love. They dated for a couple of years and then one day she
just up and left him. She never told him why. She just left. Even at the
loss of the person he loved and was planning to marry, he never shed one
tear.

A few years later, when Derrik was in his late thirties, his mother
passed away. All through her funeral he just sat with his hurt deep
inside. While others cried and let it out, just as it was when he was
growing up, not a sound of crying was make and not a tear.

The doctors had recommended counseling and he had been going for some
time now. He was told how bad it was to hold your emotions in and he had
been doing exercises to try to help him let go but even now at the death
of his beloved mother, nothing happened. Derrik went back to his small
apartment alone.

More years went by and he lost his dad as well. His grandparents had been
gone for years and now he was totally alone. No brothers, sisters, or
family and even with all of this there was never a tear shed.

Derrik had been going to church for many years but during all that time
he had just gone in, sat on the back row and slipped out as soon as
service was over. The minister had spoken with him many times and the
members had tried to make him feel welcome but he seemed to be such a
loner. so close up and inward that not they or the counselor, not anyone
could reach him, but this Sunday morning was going to be different.

He arrived at church just as it was starting and as always he came in and
slipped quietly into the back row. He sat through the opening prayer and
quior singing. The preacher preached and then the special singers started
playing as the usually did. The pastor gave an alter call and that is
when it happened.

As he sat on that little bench in that small country church where his mom
and dad had raised him and he looked around at all of the people crying
and praying he felt something. He felt something that he had never felt
in the forty three years of his life. He reached up and there running
down his nose was one small tear.

He got up form his seat and started toward the alter. With each step,
more and more tears began to fall. By the time he reached the alter, he
was weeping and crying out loud. The tears now flowing freely down his
face. He cried for the skinned knees and the dog bite. He cried for the
loss of his pet that he had loved and lost so many years ago. He cried
for his mom and dad, his grandparents, and the loss of the woman that he
had once loved. As he knelt there at that alter he really let go. He
cried for every hurt in his life that he had held so deep within his
heart. As the tears came, so did the relief. The hurt just started going
away and right there, he finally let the hurt out of his heart and let
Jesus in. As he stood up and started to go back to his seat, he realized
that for his whole life, while Jesus had tried, He had resisted. He never
would let go. As he stood there in front of the alter, he cried again but
this time he didn't cry out of hurt or pain. This time he cried for joy
and relief. God had given him the tears he'd never had and Jesus had
given him the salvation that he had always needed.