Date: Sun, 25 Sep 2005 21:28:15 -0400
From: dragonknight2222@aol.com
Subject: Tutoring the Football Jock Pt.9
All the same disclaimers apply, there isn't any sex in this one. Like I
said the story is becoming more romantic and serious than I anticipated,
but maybe that's for the best. As always enjoy.
The day dragged on. It was a pretty normal school day, except for
the fact that the flowers perked up as I walked past them, my faced was
chiseled into a smile, and light emanated from every pore of my body. I
had never felt more alive in my entire life. As a left second period a
strained my neck over the kids I passed looking for the giant frame of
Keith. I felt lost in the crowd, shorter than everyone else, with him so
tall and proud, walking straight backed, eyes shining, muscles bulging,
towering above the crowd. He was like a king in a parade, and then his
eyes spotted me, they crinkled in a smile, and for a fleeting instant it
was just the two of us on Earth. Angelic trumpets blew out over the noise
of the hallways and a choir sang out.
Marcus ruined it.
"Steven!!!"
I turned away from my godly lover as my best friend shouted my
name. I looked at him an instant, not really seeing him and turned back,
but my big, strong Keith was already far away. I couldn't even see his
tight ass through the throngs of people.
"Steven!" Marcus placed his hand on my shoulder and pushed me
gently.
"Dude, snap out of it!"
"What?" I asked, finally coming to. I looked over at him and
smiled with a quarter of the exuberance I had showed when I looked at
Keith. Marcus was handsome. He had this dark, Hispanic skin tone, black
hair gelled forward and a little spiky. He was short like me, but unlike
me still good at most sports. He couldn't play on teams because of an
injury, but could still beat me hands down anytime, any game. My favorite
part about him was his silver necklace and bracelet. They accented his
dark skin just perfectly.
"HijolÚ, c˙al es tu problema?"
"Speak English, Marcus. And I don't have any problems, why are you
on my case?" We continued walking to class.
"You've been acting kinda strange lately, man. I haven't seen you
all week, and you walked right past me two minutes ago and didn't even see
me. Your all ditzy today."
I didn't say anything for a second. "I'm sorry, Marcus, I've been
kind of stressed lately." We turned into our biology class and sat at the
corner table.
"Something wrong?"
"No, I just have a geometry test that I've been studying for all
night, its kinda fried my brain." I wanted to tell him the truth. That
the reason I hadn't heard him was because my head was dancing along up in
the clouds, but I couldn't. I hadn't told anyone I was gay, not even
Marcus, confessing now, two minutes before biology and one class before a
test seemed like a bad time.
"Guys, pass up your homework," my teacher yelled over the chatter.
I started pulling out last week's assignment, while Marcus
continued to vent. "I called your house two nights ago, your mom said you
were with Keith Firman."
"SHIIT!" I slammed the three-ring binder closed right on my thumb.
Just his name nearly made me crap my pants.
Marcus gave me the strangest look ever, imploring, guilt-striking,
and almost betrayed. He knew I was holding back, but now wasn't the time.
I blew him off, "yeah, I was just helping him with his math, we're both in
geometry. I really need to start asking for money for that stuff."
I couldn't tell if Marcus believed me or just went along with me
for my sake. "Yeah, especially when they're just dumb jocks like Keith."
I forced a laugh. My insides suddenly turned cold. Keith may not
have been the most well-spoken, well-read, or well bred guy in the world,
but he was the world to me. Was I really laughing at him? I suddenly felt
like shit, torn between my friend and my boyfriend. I wanted Keith, I
wanted him to hold me and tell me everything was alright, I wanted to tell
him I was sorry, I wanted to punch Marcus in the face, I wanted to tell him
the truth. I just turned away from him towards the teacher, and forced
myself not to cry, I had to be strong, like Keith.
Class dragged on, unbearably slow. I didn't notice however, as ten
minutes into class, I was dreaming of Keith and zoning out of the world. I
was woken up by the bell. Dazed I started putting my books away and
leaving class, Marcus was right behind me.
"Hey, do you want to come over and play Halo tonight?"
"Um, sure, I can come over, but I gotta be back home at seven."
He gave me a what's that about look, but then dropped it, "okay,
I'll see you after class, meet at the usual place?"
I nodded as he turned down the hall away from me. The thought
suddenly hit me that it was time for third period. I raced down the stairs
in search of my geometry class and my big huge hunk of a lover. I stepped
in class with the biggest smile and looked for him, but he wasn't there
yet. I fell straight from heaven and smattered against the linoleum floor
of the class. I dragged myself to my seat and pulled out my pencil looking
up expectantly for him.
I waited, other kids coming in, still no Keith. The bell rang. My
mind raced with a thousand possibilities, was he hurt, was he sick, was he
scared of seeing me...
My teacher started passing out the tests. I stared at the first
problem unable to think of any answer to it other than Keith Firman. Then
I heard it, heavy footsteps echoing against the floor in the hallway, the
sound of a jumbling backpack. He entered breathing heavily, flushed, and
slightly sweaty. "Sorry Mr. Fuchs, my locker got stuck."
I stared at his sexy body, muscles bulging from beneath his
clothes. Mr. Fuchs gave him an annoyed look and handed him his exam. He
turned to take his seat and our eyes met. I saw a look of fear for the
first time, he really did want to ace this test. I began to worry about
whether I had prepared him enough as he took his seat. Guilt about our
sexual exploits rattled me, we could have been studying during that time;
what if he failed and got kicked off the team; he'd hate me...
I looked over at him, straining to see him, he started rummaging
through his backpack for a pencil. Our eyes met and he gave me a smile.
It wasn't his light-up-the-world one, or his shit-eating grin, or even his
blissful one, just a little one saying good luck and we'll get through this
together. It was all I could've asked for.
I turned in the test thirty minutes later, fully expecting an A. I
sat back down and began reading. The bell rang and Keith was still
working, he didn't get up, I had to go all the way to the other building so
I had to leave right away, I sighed, wanting to talk to him, as I walked by
his desk my hand bushed his arm, as I walked out the door I turned back to
see a smile and two bright green eyes looking at me longingly.
I floated through the rest of the day, half-awake and halfway in my
dream of holding onto Keith tonight. I wondered what kind of movies he
liked. Would he hold me in the scary parts? What if someone saw us? Will
he kiss me at the end?
The final bell rang to end class and I walked towards the park
bench behind the gym. This was the spot where me and Marcus usually met
after school to walk home together. He lived about five minutes closer to
the school than me. I sat down waiting for him and immediately dove into
another dream. I couldn't keep focused on anything but Keith, I wondered
if the feeling would fade. Did I want it to fade? No, never, and yet, it
would be nice to be clear headed again.
The locker room door swung open and a couple of football players
started jogging to the field. Neither was as big as Keith. I had
forgotten there was a door right here to the locker room, mainly because it
was always locked. Another group of three burst out followed by Keith. He
was just putting on his helmet as he walked out. He spotted me out of the
corner of his eye and stopped.
His large shambled towards me, helmet in his hand now. Our eyes
met and he gave me a big smile, but not as big a smile as I'd hoped for, a
kind of sad smile. "Hey, what are you doing here all alone?"
"I'm waiting for Marcus, we're gonna walk home together."
"Mm," he nodded, then looked down at the ground rubbing his neck.
An awkward silence dragged out between us. The silence was unusual, he was
always so in control, now he was fumbling and uncoordinated.
"Keith, is something wrong?"
He sighed and then dropped down onto the bench next to me. His
weight made the bench groan. "Steven, um, something happened today. I...I
still want to be with you...I don't know what happened...I didn't
think...I'm sorry Steven...look, I screwed up...but I ..."
"Hey!" Marcus walked up, just then. I saw him, but the world
seemed to be spinning, what was Keith trying to say.
I waved at Marcus as he walked up, "Keith, I don't understand."
He looked to see Marcus just a few feet behind him, "I'll tell you
later, when I figure out how, tonight," he whispered quickly, then he was
getting up, just like that, all the answers were leaving and I was left the
only living person on a stranded desert island named FearInTheHeart.
"Don't worry about it," he told me, seeing the fear in my eyes, "it'll all
be okay," he put on his helmet. Marcus was now standing between us looking
confused between the two of us. "See ya later man," he said, turning to
walk away, he took three steps and turned around again, "seriously, don't
worry," he called.
"Worry about what?" Marcus asked.
"I wish I knew," I replied, standing up.
I know your wondering what's going on, it'll all be explained soon, I
promise. Any feedback is welcome at dragonknight2222@aol.com. Thanks so
much to all my readers, you're the reason I write.