Mediation is designed to get parties to their own agreement

Mediation can be important in many divorce and family law matters. In some cases, the parties might opt to try mediation voluntarily prior to the filing of a case. In other instances, parties might be court-ordered to attend mediation.

Mediation is different than arbitration in that it is not binding. This means that mediators cannot force parties to settle. Instead, mediators are there to work with the parties to help them make their own agreement.

To some parties, this might be surprising. They might expect that a mediator is there to give the parties recommendations. The mediation is then, as some think, supposed to get the parties onboard their recommendation — or convince them to get onboard.

While some mediators might take this approach, or a variant of it, another view of many is that mediation is that the process is designed to get the parties talking. Through the parties taking, the hope is the parties can get to a place where they can come up with solutions to resolve their dispute. The mediator is then there to help facilitate this discussion.

What a mediator can also do is help rephrase what the other party is saying to make it more understandable to the other. Oftentimes, because of emotions and communication that has broken down, parties hear what they want to hear versus what is actually being said. This can cause litigants to misunderstand the position of the other. Misunderstandings are what can result in lots of parties litigating when perhaps they do not need to do so.

The mediator can also play referee, in essence, in sessions to ensure that communication is fruitful, respectful and that it does not delve into a tone that is counter-productive to the spirit of settlement. For many parties going through a divorce or family law matter, mediation is certainly a good option to consider.