We Watched A Bisexual Movie And Our Eyes Did Not Melt And Fall Out Of Our Head

Speaking of Johnny Hazzard, we saw him in the most unlikely place: "Shifting Gears: A Bisexual Transmission." Yes, it was full of ladies and their parts, but, know what, we were kinda into it!

Chi Chi LaRue's "controversial" movie is full of gay male pornstars—like Wolf Hudson, Cameron Marshall, Blake Riley, Lee Stephens, Ryan Alexander, and first timer Cody Springs—hitting the pussy for a change. Of course, Mr. Hazzard doesn't have to walk on that side of the street and just gets a scene along with Marshall.

There's something refreshingly old school about the movie—there's lots of plot and dialogue, a full set, a cheesey theme—but also something incredibly revolutionary. After car repair shop owner Wolf Hudson fucks Lola on his desk and Marshall fucks Hazzard in the break room, the movie turns into polyamorous orgy with all six guys taking turns on each other, Britney Amber, Shy Love, and Krystal Kali. This is what some people hope the future would look like: a place where there are no sexual orientations, just people going at each other to spread the pleasure around. Things get intense as Riley is fucking Amber and getting fucked by Alexander at the same time, or when Springs is getting fucked by Marshall while chowing down on Kali's grade-A box.

We're not used to having all those clits in our porn, but in this context, not only didn't we mind them, we were glad they were there. At least it was something different. For a minute, while watching a hot guy stick his huge dick in a moist pussy we thought, "Hmm, that looks fun. Maybe we should try it." Then we thought, "Oh no, what if we're straight!" And we went into this sort of panic that real straight guys must feel when they realize that Tom Brady is one really handsome man.

But, no, we still would take Blake Riley over anyone else in the movie, but if Lola wants to come along for the ride, we'd be into that.