PURPOSE: Eulogy Values in Action, I Believe

Dave Berndt

Age 43, Fort Collins, CO

The meaning of life as I have understood and experienced it has two parts – the destination and the road that leads to the destination. The road feels to me more like a battle, or a war, and it can be a difficult one that brings to mind the ‘Black Dog’.

What makes sense to me, as you discuss in your book and many religious traditions claim, is that I (as with any human) have a core sin and am made of ‘broken timber’. The attempt to overcome that broken nature, to summon the strength to fight and prevent it from owning me, is my inherent experience of traveling the road to my destination.

The road feels to me more like a battle, or a war, and it can be a difficult one that brings to mind the ‘Black Dog’.

My destination appeared far off in my distant vision first in my early 30’s, and it’s become closer and more clear every day in my early 40’s. I’m not confident in understanding every one of its details, but I know it involves initiating, cultivating, and maintaining emotional connections with other human beings. The Eulogy values in action, I believe.

The Eulogy values in action, I believe.

That destination came into focus only through a long and intertwined web of influences including the help of trusted friends and family, various books of wisdom, thoughtful editorialists such as David Brooks, and deliberate self reflection and acceptance. I am fortunate and grateful to be able to nourish and promote this developing skill on a daily basis in my work as a physician, but such opportunities also abound in my personal life and with my family. And while there certainly appears to be a spectrum of need, ability, and belief regarding this concept in our world, my humble experience suggests it brings some element of meaning to us all. Participating in this forum is part of this process, too, so thank you for!