When young female celebrities become adults, the seedier side of society takes note. The case of the Olsen twins is just the latest sad example.

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"You're jailbait and I just can't wait. Jailbait baby come on."

-- Motorhead.

It was a private milestone for two young women, and a disturbing rite of passage for a nation of creepy men.

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen's 18th birthday last week was accompanied by no less than seven Web sites dedicated to counting down the minutes until the twins officially reached adulthood. Even with the competition of Ronald Reagan's funeral and that dog that can fetch objects by name, everyone from wacky morning DJs to big city news-gathering organizations were falling over themselves to spread the news.

"Lock up the boyfriend," a New York Post article announced on the twins' June 13 birthday. "The Olsen twins are legal - and they're loaded."

The coming of age of a female celebrity has always been a strange loophole in society's sexual mores. We live in a nation where schools send girls home for showing too much skin and a 38-year-old singer's jack-in-the- box boob becomes a federal case. But adult males get a flier to revel in the prospect of deflowering a Kournikova, Olsen or actress Lindsay Lohan (she's 18 in eight days!) - knowing it would have resulted in a statutory rape charge just a few hours earlier.

"Gentlemen, start your engines and get out your best booze," the Web site www.brokennewz.com explained below its now-expired OlsenMeter clock. " The Olsen twins are waiting for you!"

Most older readers who find this behavior reprehensible no doubt stopped reading several paragraphs ago. For those who stuck around, here's some more bad news: This isn't a new phenomenon. And your generation started it.

Since the days when Shirley Temple steered the Good Ship Lollipop through puberty, fans have been meticulously dissecting the first kisses, first signs of breasts and first romantic encounters of our nation's most popular female child actors. Was any straight male free of impure thoughts when Elizabeth Taylor (turned 18 on Feb. 27, 1950) officially became a woman? Wasn't it the baby boomers who counted down the seconds to the 18th birthday of Annette Funicello (Oct. 22, 1960), obsessing over her bosom all the way?

And try this fact on for size: Between 1982 and 1985, no less than three major label artists - including Rock and Roll Hall of Fame members Aerosmith and Eric Clapton - recorded or released different songs titled "Jailbait."

While countdown clocks have been running for years, the Olsen twins were clearly special news - sort of a Perfect Storm in the annals of caterpillar-to- butterfly lechery. The pair had been on television or in movies for all except the first few months of their lives, with every move dissected in the public eye (including this week's reports that Mary-Kate entered a treatment facility for an eating disorder). And, to be blunt, there are two of them. Hundreds of famous girls more attractive than the Olsen twins have turned 18, but the threesome factor boosts the gleeful perversion to unprecedented levels.

Some media organizations tried to mask the Olsens' coming of age in seemingly legitimate news stories about their business enterprises, but the hidden message was the same: When the clock struck midnight, it was no longer a felony to get busy with the stars of such movies as "To Grandmother's House We Go" and "You're Invited to Mary-Kate & Ashley's Mall of America Party."

"America's Favorite Fantasy" was the cover headline for last year's Olsen twins issue of Rolling Stone, which featured the twins in windblown, we're-not- kids-any-more poses.

The unauthorized Web sites have been even less subtle. On the mostly unprintable-in-a-family-newspaper www.twintracker9.com, there's still an outdated state-by-state rundown of the age of consent.

"One year, maybe two before the twins are legal here," the site says when you click on Alabama. "But can the cops count that high?"

There is, of course, huge irony in all of this. The demographics that are most obsessed with the coming of age of hot young actresses - basement- dwelling Internet geeks and middle-aged sports talk personalities - have the smallest chance to score with the fantastically wealthy Olsens.

One can only guess what the girls were thinking about when they turned 18. (OhmyGod Mary-Kate, does this mean, like, we get to vote? What kind of skanky lower back tattoo are you going to get, Ashley?) Whatever their plans were on the celebrated day, a menage a trois with Tom Arnold probably wasn't on the list.

Luckily for the twins, the attention span for this kind of obsession is short. More than a week past the Olsens' birthdays, most of the sites have shut down.

But the circle of life continues. "Mean Girls" star Lohan turns 18 in just over a week (July 2) - a fact that has been documented on the Internet with almost as much anticipation and fervor as the Olsens' special day. The Web has also sprouted countdown clocks for Hilary Duff (Sept. 28, 2005), golf prodigy Michelle Wie (Oct. 11, 2007) and multiple sites for Emma Watson, the 14-year-old who plays Hermione in the "Harry Potter" movies (April 15, 2008).

If there was any question whether we live in a society of tasteless and inappropriate thinkers, the headline on the "Official Countdown Site to Hermione's 18th Birthday" pretty much seals it.