The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923, May 03, 1901, Image 8

Image and text provided by University of Nebraska-Lincoln Libraries, Lincoln, NE

yS5!?B!IS KfJJWW 'IV8"J.,'!'Whether Common or Not.The Annual Trouble.I shudder when my work Js dona . .And I approach my cottago door,For fear tho yearly rout's begun . . ,And I am in for it onco more.Around tho corner near my homoI slyly poop in doubt and fearThat to my eyes a sight will comoTo banish hope and light and cheer.For Dorothy tho last few days. ,Has looked about with well-known gaze.Tho symptoms fill my soul with dreadAnd fear my very boing racks;For as I sleepless toss in boiI think of rags and nails and tacks.And at tho morn I know full wellTho blow must soon or lator fall;That' naught can break the gloomy spellWhich settles o'er us like a pall.Afi'd"!'tls no longor wise to hopeTo miss tho scont of paint and soap.Washrags and piles of woll-worn clothes;A scrubbing brush and cans of lye;A broomstick tacked on bit of hose,Stopladdor standing idly by.Tho clothesline stretched from house to shed,And mops and brooms in open sightThat's why I como with fear and dreadHomo from tho office ev'ry night.I feel that soon tho awful blowWill fall and fill mo full of woo. vAnd when at laBt T see the signThat I am up against it hard . , ,Tho carpets hanging on the lino, -Tho furniture strewn 'round tho yard ,I'll know tho yearly week of dread . . .JHas como, and that my loving spouse, r ,With dust cap set upon her headHas gono to work at cleaning house.And then tho carpets I must beat " ,'Arid'DW&oittent with scraps to eat ' -4". nottiriodernlzcd Provcrts. ..' rTho world loves a cheerful loser.Love never laughs at goldsmiths. 'A beer in the brewery is worth two in the hide.Congressmen who vote franchises must not bomuzzled.A stitch in time may cure appendicitis.War has its congressional grafts no. lessprofitable than peace.Never look a slot machine in the face.Behold what a great smell a little cigarettefcindleth.flodcra Business Methods.Irato Customer "I thought you said theseTvero fast colors!"Smooth Clerk "Do not become excited mydear madam. Let us understand each other perfectly. If I say a horse is fast, do you understandthat I mean the horse will not run?"Irate Customer "Why, no; I guess youmean "Smooth Clerk "Exactly, madam. You misunderstood me when I said those were fast colors. Iused tho word 'fast' as you would. In speaking of aspeedy horse."Irate Customer "But "Smooth Clerk "At the book counter you willfind a late and thoroughly revised edition of 'English as She is Spoke.' Step that way, "madam.Call again, please."Uncle Eben."I have noticed, remarked Uncle Eben, as hereplaced the lid of tho pickle barrel, "that th' manwho is alius quotln' scriptur' is a mighty goodman t watch in a hoss trade."An' another thing I hev noticed," continuedThe Commoner.Undo Ebon, "it ain't safe f figure thot a man.anfhis wife Hvo happy jus' because they alius call each .other pot names when company comes.";She'll be There.A blooming young miss of Eau Clairo,With lips like red roses a pairo,Said, "Sure I will geauTo tho Buffalo sheau . , -Ifpapa the money can spaire."Life's Shooting Gallery.Somo men are sure to miss the goal at which theyaim,But marksman, not the bow, is most to blame.NNSure Return.He who will always trouble borrowMust-usury pay in shape of sorrow., All Alike.."I see Carnegie wants to die poor.""Well, he won't have any more than the restof us after ho is dead."fiAAn Ancient Pigmy."How big was Alexander, pa,That people call him great?Was he like some' giant steeple tall,His spear an hundredweight."Then papa opened up his mouthAnd this truth did relate:"He wasn't half as big as someWho run our ship of state.V5 He wasn't big enough to form' , I-; A. scheme within his pateiv-. And -financier it till he had--... ,v., -,, A-monster syndicate." . -'Mi C sOf Course. ,"How did you like the new minister's sermon.""Much better than I did that stuck-up Mrs.Peachely's new spring bonnet.''Cheer. -Iwon't need flowers about'my headWhen I am lying cold and dead.But they will fill my soul with mirthWhile I'm alive and still on earth.With flowers the living's pathway pave'Tis better than bouquets on the grave.W. M. M.Nature's Phenomenon."They tell me that Mrs. Whitney's hair turned'gray in one night.""Well, you see, a burglar frightened he in thonight so that she was too nervous to put on herblonde wig in the morning." Denver News.Fishing Time.I only wish and wish and wish. That I could fish and fish and fish; . .I'd like to sit the live long day,Upon a bale of prairie hay,Down where the river sadly wails,And fish for suckers and for whales.'Tis shameful that on this free soil,. A man must toil and toil and toil;And grunt and swear and strive and"groan.And burst his martingale and moan:Grow old and bald, before his time,In following the -festive dime.Ah, life would be a pjeasant dream,If. one could sit beside a stream,WUli rod in hand, at early dawn,No comrade but his demijohn(The latter filled with lemonade)To-sit there in the drowsy shade -.What higher bliss could mortals wish!Ah, let us go and fish and fish.Exchange.An Example Inviting Caution.The European country which is said to resemble tho United States more nearly than anyother in industrial character and s;irit is Germany. And it is certainly true that both countries adhere to the high tariff policy, both havobeen given over to the syndicating of productionabove other countries, and in botn do we find an.unequaled dash and enterprise in speculation andindustry.But at the moment industrial conditions inthese two countries contrast strangely. ' Of the situation in the United States we i-eed not speak. Tho'tide of prosperity seems to be still rising, thocombination and inflation of industrial and railway investments proceed on a scale not beforeapproached during four years of amazing expansion, and the Wall street speculation passes allpreviously known bounds. Confidence in the futureis unclouded, labor is fully employed, and all goesexceedingly well in the amassing of mighty fortunes.The current dispatches from Germany reveaLa very different situation there. The (speculativebreakdown and industrial reaction, which beganthere about a year ago, continue, with deepeningadverse consequences to the people. The BerlinerTageblatt of a day or two ago describes conditionsas so bad that charitable efforts are powerless tocope with the situation. Cases of reduced production and dismissals of working people are so numerous as no longer to attract notice. It is safe tosL.-. says an Associated press dispatch of yesterday from Berlin, that 25 per cent of the workingpeople are either idje or insufficiently employed;prices in many industries are so depressed thatthere is difficulty in meeting the bare costs of operation; "many factories have closed, and inothers the hours of labor hae been reduced, whilpworkers crowd to the gates of Ue factories seekingemployment."Another dispatch from the same point saysthL. the great Krupp iron and steel works havqalready dismissed 4,000 employes, and are aboutto discharge 5,000 more, and it is added: "The industrial depression continues. Accoroing to a recent estimate, one-fourth of the workers in Berlinare very insufficiently employed or totally idle.The distress of many is acute. There is no prospect of improvement.", And this is the country of which it was reported barely two years ago that "every chimney issmoking and every wheel turning," and of whichConsul General Mason at Berlin reported to thoAmerican state department: "The 200 trusts andsyndicates which were in existence in Germany atthe beginning of 1899 are increasing in numberday by day until there is scarcely a single important product of manufacture of which the output, price and conditions of sale are not governed by a combination or understanding betweenproducers." And this is the country where thobelief obtained wide acceptance, as in our owncountry, that the trusts and syndicates were establishing a stability and evenness of Industrial conditions which would prevent a recurrence of periods of overproduction, panic and depression. Inthe trusts, it was thought, as a Berlin correspondent of a New York commercial organ recentlystated, the country had found a panacea for Indus-trial depressions.This far-off situation may or may not be considered as of domestic concern or bearing, as youplease. The common notion, supported by experience, Is that the commercial natio-.s are so closely interrelated that no one of them can hope tohold Itself unaffected by the influences and conditions affecting any of the others. The word ofcaution is clearly in order at just this time in the.United States, if it is ever in order where speculation appears to bo in danger of going mad.Springfield (Mass.) Republican.w4BMii'iMrirAiBf'iiitM1(iilMfcjJ:vJi.lIWW