The Secret Life of a Background Character

Hi everyone, finally decided to give a fan fic a try. The idea for this one will be to have 3 characters alternating talking, like three stories connected into one. Some parts will be kind of short. I'll try to post more at least once a week. Please give some feedback on it. And as writing for existing characters isn't one of my strengths, please tell me if any of my writing is out of character.

The Secret Life of a Background Character​

Written by Hubert​

Chapter 1.1​

​

Rowlf, Rowlf the Dog here. (Well, not really here, but...) During the Muppet Show days, I used to think the background characters had it great. You know, the ones with minor speaking roles who just showed up to fill up empty screen space and give obsessed Muppet fans something to talk about. (Really, try to stay away from those fans. They’ll record every appearance you make on a thing called a wiki.) While all the big time Muppets performed and did important stuff, the background characters could just relax, and have fun. No nervousness about going out on stage, no scripts or songs to practice, it seemed like it’d be the best.​

I thought that for years, until I became one. They say, “The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence,” and I guess that’s true in performing, too. But actually, I have a feeling once you’ve jumped back and forth between yards a few times, you’ll be content with where you are. Don’t know yet, still waiting to find out.​

My longtime friend, Baskerville, had these kind of roles. He always seemed pretty content with them. As long as I can remember working with the Muppets, Baskerville’s been there. We started out doing some commercials for Purina Dog Chow, but after that, Baskerville kind of went to just doing background stuff. Occasionally he’d do something with me, like sing “Dog Eat Dog” or “May You Always,” but except for the occasional Veterinarian’s Hospital sketch, he didn’t really need to do much. I think he may have been on Sesame Street once. I can remember when we had auditions at the theater, he auditioned to be a new comedian, which, because of Fozzie, didn’t end well.​

Now I can kind of see why he auditioned. And really, I have nothing against Fozzie, but I wish it could have led to some bigger role. I hope he gets that chance someday to do something. I hear about a second new Muppet movie in the works. Anyone have James Bobin’s phone number?​

--------------------
Good beginning. Curious to see where you're headed. Will this be Rowlf's tale, or Baskerville's, or both? Here's to obscure characters! Yayy!

--------------

Click to expand...

Baskerville won't be featured too heavily in the story. I'm going to have two other characters sharing their background character tales as well, all three alternating, though as of now Rowlf's sections will be the most crucial to the whole fanfic. Really, in the past few days I keep changing things in the coming parts, the whole story keeps getting better and better. But you know, now that you ask about if Baskerville will heavily featured, I kinda think I have to make some changes and more heavily feature him. I think a new, larger part for him could enhance the story further.

Sorry for double posting, but I'm going to post some more. I'm going to post the next two parts, since one is super short. Please continue to leave input.

The Secret Life of a Background Character​

Written by Hubert​

Chapter 1.2: Link Hogthrob​

Uh, this little schedule I was given that tells me what to talk about in each part in order to keep the stories close together says I should give an introduction of my story. I don’t really have an introduction, so I’ll start by saying ‘Hi Mom and Dad!’ Typing up my story as I say it is Annie Sue Pig, oh, what’s that? Annie Sue also says hi to her mom and dad. By the way, since you can’t really see me through text, I’ll tell you that I’m looking quite handsome today. There were supposed to be some little smilies of me at the top of this part, but I insisted that they be taken off. They didn’t properly depict my chin.​

So, for an introduction: My name is Link Hogthrob, and I am a wonderful, handsome, and charming actor. I was the star of Pigs in Space for many years, and also played other roles on the Muppet Show, which I was hired for before the second season. I was the captain in Pigs in Space, beside Julius Strangepork and First Mate Piggy. In Bear on Patrol, I was the police chief. Even though Fozzie was the star of this sketch, I still believe I was the best dressed.​

I didn’t think anything could happen to my career, and I still don’t think it can. Because I am a wonderful actor. But even wonderful actors have occasional career scares. Mine wasn’t that bad, though. I still came through it fairly easily. Here is my story (well, a bit later on).​

Chapter 1.3: Scooter​

​

I spent my time with the Muppets more behind the scenes. I was the go-fer. I could go fer coffee or go fer iced tea. (That doesn’t mean I’ll get you iced tea, That Announcer.) I enjoyed my backstage duties, and even though I wasn’t a major performer, I still had a large role around the theater, doing countless other things to keep the show in order.​

The Muppet Show’s background characters were just always there, and were always taken for granted. They just were there to fill up empty space, sing in a chorus in some songs, stuff like that. Sometimes background characters not needed would even sit in the audience to watch the show. You never really noticed them. They were important, and you knew they were there as a whole, but you really didn’t have too many daily conversations with them. You’d talk to them about little things, like about a certain act, or say hi occasionally, but the main characters didn’t really converse with them all that much. We knew them, of course, just they weren’t our main priority on the show.​

Since I never really noticed them, I never knew what it was like to be a background character, and I never really thought about it. And of course, I had never been one. After all, my uncle owned the theater, and I could use that to stay to stay go-fering (and it was good for getting an occasional raise). Since my early days with the Muppets, I had always been toward the forefront, up there with Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, the Electric Mayhem, the Swedish Chef, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew, Beaker, and Rowlf. From the early days of the Muppet Show I’d been there, and I wasn’t leaving anytime soon. Or so I thought.​

You don’t really realize what people are going through until you actually go through it. If you did, there’d be no such thing as world hunger. And I didn’t realize anything about the secret life of a background character.​

I'll post more of the story now. I think I'm going to post more of the story every Sunday and every Wednesdayish (It'll probably take me until Thursday sometimes to get around to posting). So stay tuned for more on Wednesday or Thursday. But until then, here is Chapter 2.1:

Chapter 2.1: Rowlf the Dog (by Hubert with some dialogue written by Jerry Juhl and Jack Burns)​

​

“Evenin’. Rowlf, Rowlf the dog. Sit yourself down,” I said as the little green guy approached me.
“Kermit, Kermit the frog,” he said.
“Pleased to meet you.” I played a few notes on my piano. “I’m no Heifetz, but I get by.”
“That was very nice.” I could tell right there this Kermit was a pretty good guy. I could sense there was something wrong.
“Broken heart, right?” I asked.
“Does it show?”
“Listen, when you’ve been ticklin’ the ivories as long as I have you’ve seen a star for every drop of rain, a shattered dream for every falling star.”
“Exactly. She just walked out on me,” he said.
“Typical. That’s why I live alone.”
“You do, huh?”
“You bet. I finish work, I go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk and go to bed.”
“Nice and simple,” he responded. I could tell in the slightest way he kind of admired me.
“Stay away from women. That’s my motto,” I told him.
“But I can’t,” he said.
“Neither can I. That’s my trouble.”

And it was in that way that I first met Kermit the Frog. Sort of. (Dictaphones weren’t invented yet, but you get the idea) That was my life at that point as I had described it to Kermit. I’d finish my work, go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk and go to bed. Simple life. However, I tagged along with Kermit and company anyhow. I’m sure glad I did.

The first thing I did with the Muppets was co-star in some commercials with Purina Dog Chow, with another dog named Baskerville. That was in the early 60s. That was fun, but my big break came with something much less Muppety: The Jimmy Dean Show. Which speaking of, I should probably start making breakfast. But anyway, I appeared on The Jimmy Dean Show in the 60s, becoming a regular cast member. Me and Jimmy did some sort of sketch every episode. It was a lot of fun. It was the first time ever I really got to have a big role on something.

In 1976, the Muppets finally got a big TV show, The Muppet Show. Since I had the most piano-playing experience on the show, I was given the job of pianist. I did a lot in that job, between coming up with songs for my own sketches and playing in the orchestra every episode. On top of all that, I had a role in a recurring sketch, Veterinarian’s Hospital, where Miss Piggy, Janice, and I, in a hospital setting, made all kinds of jokes and puns. As I mentioned in my introduction, I had a big and busy role on the show, unlike the background characters. I figured that, after my simple life, they probably had a simple life, and sometimes wished I did again. However, I loved my job, and wasn’t going to give it up.

I was prominently featured in the movies we made, I played the role of myself in The Muppet Movie, where we tried to recreate how the Muppets came together, somewhat successfully. 1981’s The Great Muppet Caper came a smaller, yet still important role for me. I played a resident of the Happiness Hotel, then played an important part in stopping Nicky Holliday, even though I didn’t have a blowtorch. I played countless other roles in the 80s, narrating Dog City, playing a magician, and singing with John Denver included. Since the 60s my stardom had never faded away, but it would. Soon. Very Soon.​

Wow, this is terrific so far! I've always liked Rowlf, but lately I've grown to love him even more. Scooter has always been one of my favorites! Link I never cared for too much, but 2 out of 3 ain't bad!
I love Rowlf's line about needing to make breakfast. I love that kind of brief call back to the present from reminiscences!

I must apologize for neglecting this fic for a while. I'll try to keep posting regularly. I know it's small, but here's the next part:

Chapter 2.2: Link Hogthrob

I was hired after the first season of the Muppet Show, all because I happened to walk in during the firing of Wayne and Wanda. (You can read more about this in LinkiePie<3’s fanfic, It Was Me.) I was hired to be the wonderful, smart, and brave captain of Pigs In Space. It was an extremely fun role to play, and it gave me by big break in acting.

However, my role on the Muppet Show was not limited to just Pigs In Space. I did many other things on the show. I talked to trees, rhymed, did a song with Lesley Ann Warren, rode a motorcycle, and played a viking. Starting in the third season I also played the police chief in Bear on Patrol, co-starring with Fozzie.

Other than the Muppet Show, I did some other things with the Muppets. Though I didn’t have a major role in The Muppet Movie, if you can find me in the big finale, I do look quite stunning. In the Muppets Go to the Movies, I played Gummo, one of the 3 musketeers, along with Scooter and Gonzo. In my career, I also played a member of Congress, remembered the Alamo, and attended a wedding. (I was voted best dressed at the reception.) I also went to Fozzie’s mother’s house, and told her about how I co-starred in a sketch with her son.

Soon after this, I had a minor career scare, which I well discuss a bit later on. Do remember though, I did recover from it. They don’t publish stories with unhappy endings, do they?​

Sorry for the long delay, here's the next part. Sorry it's kinda short and boring, next chapter things will begin heating up.

Chapter 2.3: Scooter

There are two stories going around about how I got started with the Muppets. One is that I was the road manager for the Electric Mayhem, and when they met Kermit, so did I. The other is that I just sort of popped in to get a job, because my uncle said I could, and after all, he owned theater. I’m not going to debunk either rumor, as that would really do a damper on our publicity.

But regardless of how it happened, I ended up as the go-fer on the Muppet Show. I had a lot of fun doing this job. I’d go fer coffee, or go fer sandwiches, or go fer anything you need. But in addition to this, I did a lot of other things on the show. I did do some performing in sketches, and even do larger things, such as playing a large role in our production of Robin Hood. I sometimes had to do much more than my job required, such as host on occasion when Kermit was for some reason missing. I also did some other off-duty jobs in my free time on the set, such as running a superhero correspondence course and being hired by Miss Piggy on multiple occasions.

After the Muppet Show ended, I still had a variety of roles, playing myself in the Muppet Movie, a resident of the Happiness Hotel, one of the three musketeers, and even a scarecrow. I had a lot of fun with all of the new experiences in these roles, and if I didn’t get a role, my uncle would have something to say about it. But soon, even my uncle was not able to redeem me from the secret life of a background character.