Portable Battery Operated Shower

If you're anything like me you don't shower because your natural pheromones attract the ladies like rare earth magnets. But if you prefer to smell like soap, then this Coleman product allows you to cleanse yourself anywhere you want. It's a battery operated shower that runs off four D batteries (and costs $27). The tank holds around 5 gallons and you will look really dumb using it like the guy in the picture who is hopefully about to get hit by a car. Or if you don't want to buy this thing you can do what I do, which is steal the elderly neighbor's garden hose. And electricity. And car sometimes.