apology

i try but i'm so screwed up now that what i start to type as support becomes much darker and i cannot inflict that on anyone here when they are asking for help - i just delete it and hate myself for not being able to help

i've pulled back from just about everyone here because i can't seem to control my thoughts enough and i won't potentially inflict harm on anybody

You don't have to apologize. :hug: I agree. Caring is equally important. Sometimes, I have trouble offering help because I realize what I've typed isn't helpful and may be too dark to post. You're not alone there.