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3 Tips to Enjoying Pregnancy for First-Time Moms Over 40

by Word of Mom Blogger on January 28, 2013

Word of Mom Blogger

About the Author

The best parenting bloggers share their thoughts on the wild and crazy journey of raising kids.

About the Blog

WhatToExpect.com supports Word of Mom as a place to share stories and highlight the many perspectives and experiences of pregnancy and parenting. However, the opinions expressed in this section are those of individual writers and do not reflect the views of Heidi Murkoff of the What to Expect brand.

Cynthia Wilson James, a 40+ first-time mom, writer, and former childbirth educator, is founder of InSeason Mom and http://inseasonmomreflections.blogspot.com, which provides support to first-time moms over 35 and 40.InSeason Mom has been recognized by CBS NY and MSNBC. Cynthia enjoys reading, watching suspense television shows, jumping rope, and eating chocolate-covered raisins.

Having married for the first time at age 40 and gave birth at age 42 and 44 to two healthy babies, who were conceived the old-fashioned way, I know it's not always an easy feat to enjoy your pregnancy. You are more vulnerable to the doom and gloom information about 35+ pregnancy lurking everywhere from the magazine in your OB/GYN office to the special TV report to your Aunt Emma's tales of what happened to her cousin's mother's friend who had a baby in her 40s. Take a moment, breathe, and relax. Or as we say in the South, "Girl, take a minute to get hold of yourself."

Here are three tips to help you gain a healthier outlook on your pregnancy:

1. Realize you are not alone.

Although reports vary when citing the number of women giving birth for the first time in their 40s, most agree that the number of mothers in this category has doubled in the last several years. An April 2012 study by the National Center for Health Statistics found that an "increasing proportion of women who have their first baby at age 35 or older aren't stopping with one child." The Center says among all women whose first birth occurred between age 35 and 44, nearly 40 percent had at least two children in 2006-2010.

Take comfort, my sister, while you may be the only expectant mom over 40 in your circle of friends or small community, you are far from being alone.

2. Realize "they" are not "you."

Whether it's your Aunt Emma or an insensitive health care professional who quotes so many unfavorable statistics about older pregnant women that they nearly scare you into labor, try to remain calm and focus. Focus by remembering that the studies are based on the results of midlife pregnant women as a group and are not based on your individual medical history. Ask your health care provider if he or she has concerns about your pregnancy. Listen carefully to make sure the concerns are medically based rather than opinion-based. It's important to select an obstetrician or midwife who respects your right to have your pregnancy viewed individually.

3. Realize your pregnancy is a divine gift.

If your pregnancy includes the normal symptoms of being nauseous and vomiting to feeling fatigue, it may be hard to think of your pregnancy as a divine gift. Nevertheless, it is. The God of the Universe has chosen you to carry a new life. He has chosen you to introduce a precious life into this world; a life that may make a difference to only one person or to one million people.

Remembering these three tips will help you keep a positive perspective during your pregnancy!