The One App You Need to Be Blissfully Lazy and Happy

Hi, my name is Chloe Metzger, I'm a tech-loving millennial, and I hate phone calls. OK, fine, I know how this makes me sound—like every other text-obsessed kid my grandmother hates—but hey, the Internet is awesome. What's not awesome: when I can't find what hours the tiny nail salon down the street is open, or when I want to make a hair appointment but I can't book online and I'm forced to dial, wait on hold, and interact with a stranger, and I possibly need to jot down info with a pen, can't find a pen, cry a bit, and throw my phone against a wall, etc. Life is tough. So when I heard about GetClose, a brand-new app that lets you message any business anywhere in the country and get a fast response to your question without uttering a sound, I was 1 billion percent on board.

As soon as you download the free app to your iPhone (sorry, Android users—your salvation is yet to come) and make an account, you're ready to roll. Like Yelp, you can search for a specific type of business near you (i.e., "salon" or "restaurant"), or search the place by its name. Then just message the business your question and wait for a response. To test it out, I messaged four nail salons and three hair salons, asking a bunch of mundane pricing questions. Within nine minutes, all seven businesses had responded with clear, concise answers. I tried it again, this time with a restaurant, asking for happy hour specials and making a reservation through the app. In about seven minutes, my plans were solidified, and I barely had to glance at my phone to do it.

But wait! It gets lazier better! Before you start thinking this app is only cool for the small percentage of businesses that use it, let me repeat this: You can message any business your brain can think of, anywhere in the country, regardless of whether or not they're on the app, and you will get a prompt response. Even if it's a mom-and-pop pizza parlor in Bettendorf, Iowa, or a hippie bike shop in Santa Clarita, California (seriously, I tried them both), the magical team at GetClose will contact the business and find out the answer for you. Or if the business is already signed up, you'll get to chat directly with someone on staff.

Yes, this app is for the highly devolved lazy person. Yes, this app makes communicating with other humans nearly obsolete. And yes, I will be keeping it on my phone forever, until society burns down and robots take over the world.