It amazes me that so many allegedly "educated" people have fallen so quickly and so hard for a fraudulent fabrication of such laughable proportions. The very idea that a gigantic ball of rock happens to orbit our planet, showing itself in neat, four-week cycles -- with the same side facing us all the time -- is ludicrous. Furthermore, it is an insult to common sense and a damnable affront to intellectual honesty and integrity. That people actually believe it is evidence that the liberals have wrested the last vestiges of control of our public school system from decent, God-fearing Americans (as if any further evidence was needed! Daddy's Roommate? God Almighty!)

Documentaries such as Enemy of the State have accurately portrayed the elaborate, byzantine network of surveillance satellites that the liberals have sent into space to spy on law-abiding Americans. Equipped with technology developed by Handgun Control, Inc., these satellites have the ability to detect firearms from hundreds of kilometers up. That's right, neighbors .. the next time you're out in the backyard exercising your Second Amendment rights, the liberals will see it! These satellites are sensitive enough to tell the difference between a Colt .45 and a .38 Special! And when they detect you with a firearm, their computers cross-reference the address to figure out your name, and then an enormous database housed at Berkeley is updated with information about you.

Of course, this all works fine during the day, but what about at night? Even the liberals can't control the rotation of the Earth to prevent nightfall from setting in (only Joshua was able to ask for that particular favor!) That's where the "moon" comes in. Powered by nuclear reactors, the "moon" is nothing more than an enormous balloon, emitting trillions of candlepower of gun-revealing light. Piloted by key members of the liberal community, the "moon" is strategically moved across the country, pointing out those who dare to make use of their God-given rights at night!

Yes, I know this probably sounds paranoid and preposterous, but consider this. Despite what the revisionist historians tell you, there is no mention of the "moon" anywhere in literature or historical documents -- anywhere -- before 1950. That is when it was initially launched. When President Josef Kennedy, at the State of the Union address, proclaimed "We choose to go to the moon", he may as well have said "We choose to go to the weather balloon." The subsequent faking of a "moon" landing on national TV was the first step in a long history of the erosion of our constitutional rights by leftists in this country. No longer can we hide from our government when the sun goes down.

^ don't see what any of this has to do with looney Al Gore getting filthy rich off of the global warming scam

Haven’t you noticed that people that call global warming a scam are all idiots? Food for thought.

Doesn't matter to me, even if it is real I'm not going to live long enough to suffer much. I'll just be happy knowing all the wacko liberals on the east and west coasts are going to have to move to higher ground.

And he fails at geography...

The left coast is better prepared for flooding than just about anyone.

Just a helpful reminder for everyone that the stuff we pump into the atmosphere has no consequence whatsoever on life or the environment! Now that we’ve agreed on this. May I recommend this handy charcoal briquette bbq!! It’s perfect for every occasion and safe! Powers out??? That’s right! Now only is this bad boy safe but you can light it inside your living room!! Don’t feel like leaving the comfort of your cosy basement because those darn stairs take the wind out of you!!!!! Pop a couple hotdogs on the charcoal bbq while you’re having a marathon internet session from the safety of home and you never have to leave! And the good news it’s, it’s safe!!! *whispers* Those pesky scientists saying using carbon based fuels are bad for life and the environment have no idea what they’re talking about because a couple of scientists working for us say they don’t. Have I mentioned it’s safe!!!!!! Why shoot!!!! You could keep a whole tray of ice in your closed room where your bbq is burning and the ice will actually grow and not Melt!!!!! But Cunnalingus you’re asking, everybody knows that ice melts when temperatures get warmer! As you can see here in this helpful graph this isn’t the case!