catpenis27Also, did anyone else notice the price of this shit? You could LEASE a shitass mid 90's Pontiac for about the same price you could lease a Mercedes 15-20 years later. Also, you know what Pontiac stands for...

SodomiteRent-to-own furcoats and a black doll named Kenya? Fucking goldmine.

Mother_PuncherI just watched some crappy movie with him in it. It was about trains so it was targeted to autistics but it had a lot of special effects so it was like Micheal Bay made a movie for the Xena: Warrior Princess fanbase.

pressed peanut sweepingsWhen I first saw that commercial, I was a little kid without any money, so i figured hitting yourself in the head really hard with a dead squirrel was a bit easier than obtaining a Game Gear.

kingofthenothingYou could advertise damn near anything in those days. It was magical. "Gold Bond - rub it on your nuts after you take a shower and it's like little fairies are there humming on your balls. Might cause testicular cancer later but it sure feels good now." No, wait, they didn't actually say that.

freedoomNot Howlie Long, Richard Burgi. He was TV's The Sentinel on UPN.

cognitivedissonanceThe only Game Gear I ever played was owned by an obnoxious Kosher-keeping Pentecostal, so I knew it was obviously not my thing.