STATCOUNTER

October 2017

There you sit, next to a trash can filled with your self-rejected headlines. You thought none were quite good enough, but as your deadline creeps closer, some of them are looking better than ever.

Don’t despair. Today I am going to give you the answer to all your present and future headline problems: introducing the fill-in the blanks headline!

Now, there is a downside. The solution is so simple, you may decide to rely on it forever. Perhaps more important, it is a cheap trick that has yet to produce a truly good idea. But when you face the prospect of either writing an ad, or running “compliments of a friend” in its place, it does take on some (minor) value.

So with no further ado, here’s your very own fill-in headline generator

Introducing a (blank) that’s as (blank) as you are.

OK, you need more assistance? Well, here are some appalling examples of how it works.

Introducing a smartphone that’s as smart as you are.

Introducing a mattress that’s as soft and caring as you are.

Introducing a fireplace that’s as revolutionary as you are.

Introducing a banana that’s as radical as you are.

Got the idea? Good. Though of course, if you do use this technique, I will have to bar you from ever reading my blog again—Hey, what do you mean, that that’s a small price to pay?

“I would be lying if I said I never enters my mind,“ she said, “but at the end of the day, no one can be me.”

“It’s good to have great chairs. But at the end of the day, nobody comes back to sit in a great chair.”

The two quotes above are from two different publications. But at the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter where they came from. I am certain that I could easily have found many more. Because, at the end of the day, it is easy to spot clichés being born. And like most clichés, they have the ability to weaken otherwise interesting ideas.

Yes, the thought that no one else can be me is a good one. Putting it in a marketing context, it is saying, “Hey, what I sell may be considered a commodity. But it is what I personally bring to the party that makes my product stand out from the competition.”

And so too is the thought that yes, attention to detail is vital, but it is not the reason customers return. A great chair can make a visit to a restaurant more comfortable, but it is what is put on the plate that makes the sale. Good thoughts indeed, but diluted by introducing them with a hackneyed phrase.

Yes, I know, to be fair, I should point out the benefits of predictable phrases—immediate communication, instant comprehension, comforting familiarity. But, this may be more valid in copy for news journals and editorials than for advertising. And, at the end of the day, it is indeed my blog, and I feel no need to spend a lot of time on opposing viewpoints. At the end of the day, there is no doubt that fresh language is preferable.

So there are the two stores. Side by side. One has a large sign that says, “PIZZA.” Next door, the other sign also says, “PIZZA.” But it adds, “Keys Made. Sushi. Alterations.”

My question is, if you wanted a slice of pizza, which establishment would you go to? I have to believe it’s the one that offers just the one thing you want: pizza. Somehow, there is a feeling of confidence, a belief that by concentrating on one thing, their product has to be superior than anything offered by a competitor who presents it as just one of many items for sale.

Which brings us, as is so often the case, to you. There is, hopefully, one thing you do exceedingly well. One thing you are known for. And the question becomes, how far do you want to extend your brand before it snaps under the weight of too many options? There is much to be gained by line extensions—but there is much to be lost if you stray too far for what your core is perceived to be. Expertise and reputation carry over, of course, but rarely to unrelated efforts. Gillette can do fine with grooming products, razors, shampoos, and so forth. But a Gillette gluten free line of pastries will do nothing but damage the brand.

I think the Lego storage drawer idea shown above works well. It just feels right—colorful, friendly, recognizable, unexpected but not far-fetched. And I am sure you can think of many other Lego possibilities that’ll enhance rather than dilute the brand.

Yes, the temptation is to stick your brand’s label on everything you can, the rationale being that it gives you more opportunities to make a sale. But unless those incremental dollars solidify your brand’s authenticity, sooner rather than later your over extended story will turn around and bite you on your image.

Many people (OMG. Who does that sound like!), think that a good idea is the same as a big idea. They believe that unless an idea rocks the world or goes viral it is not really a good idea.

Well, I am here to say, months in advance, “Humbug.”

It is not the size of the idea that matters; an idea is either good or it is not. And the interesting thing about smaller good ideas is that they often have a longer life span than the immediately more impactful large economy size.

Let me present three “small” good ideas. Though none are marketing based, they each make the point exceedingly well.

First, let us lift our cups to whoever thought of putting a pause option on our coffee makers. I am not a fan of coffee pods, and use what I guess is considered an old-fashioned glass carafe coffeemaker. And just as we all have stood in front of our microwaves irrationally wishing they were even faster, when you are brewing four cups of coffee and just want one quickly for yourself, the pause and pour is the finest thing about moving mornings forward. Sure, it’s just a small plastic doohickey, but miraculous indeed.

Second, there is a movie coming out, starring Benedict Cumberbatch, called The Current War. It is about the battle between Thomas Edison and George Westinghouse as to who would provide electricity to America, and whether it would be direct current or alternating.

I just finished the novel that I think the film is based on—though I could not find any “based on” credit—The Last Days of Night, and among other things realized anew how dangerous electricity can be. So how come we do not get a dangerous shock when we flip a light switch? I don’t know, but whoever thought of how to solve the potential problem had a good idea we use dozens of times a day, without even realizing how good an idea it is.

And finally, though I am not certain what they did before, whoever thought of simply putting holes in a belt to adjust the size will never get credit for a really good idea, though considering my waist size, it can’t really be called a small idea. Certainly an advance from tying a rope around your waist.

So there you have it. Three “small” ideas that are three good ideas.

(And whoever comes up with the solution to having to unplug your router or TV to reset it, rather than simply having an off/on switch, will be featured in next year’s small idea blog.)