Tuesday, February 1, 2011

3 Recent Grievances

I remember the first time I saw a billboard for the Bagel BELT. It was at Dundas and Sorauren. Bacon, egg, lettuce and tomato. BELT. Cute. And delicious for breakfast.

So how come now, when I go to Tim Hortons and order one, they ask, “Do you want bacon, ham or sausage?” when I've clearly ordered a BELT?

Oh great, you have choices to replace the B! The B is for bacon. You can’t just pretend acronyms stand for other things. If I wanted ham or sausage, I would have ordered a HELT or SELT respectively. Your marketing guys are stupid.

AIR MILES REWARD REDEMPTION

I recently found my Air Miles card and discovered I had 507 points on it. Wow, 507! I probably couldn’t get a canoe trip across the Don River for that much, even if I brought my own paddle and my own canoe.

I opted to get a couple movie ticket packages and they said it would take three weeks to ship to me. Three weeks? Don’t movie theaters let you print your tickets at home now? Why wouldn’t it be like pay, bam! - Print your tickets right there, see a movie that night?

Then the confirmation e-mail said it would take up to three business days to process the request and three to FOUR weeks to ship.

How fucking lazy are the people at Air Miles? I could print this shit at home in two minutes. Hell, I could walk to their head office and pick up a pair of movie tickets in less time than it takes for them to get off their ass and process the request.

They must take shitloads of coffee breaks.

WOMAN ON THE STREETCAR WHO PRESSED NEITHER THE GREEN 'ACCEPT CALL' BUTTON NOR THE RED 'DECLINE CALL' BUTTON ON HER IPHONE, BUT INSTEAD STARED AT THE SCREEN UNTIL IT STOPPED RINGING

I saw what you did. You’re not only a shitty friend, but an inept iPhone user. You know you can press the volume down button and it will decline the call without sending it right to voicemail? Dumbass.

3 comments:

Completely agree with the BELT piece. Airmiles though is bigger than you and I combined. (have you seen Up in the Air?)

From experience though, you're better off staying away from the packages and just getting the 2 for 1. They're handy if you bring a friend, or even for a cheap date, hey hey!

and finally, yes, I've seen people stare at their phone.

I was in a restaurant having a beer or five with my dad and his cell went off. People usually forgive one ring. He's staring at it. At 2 full rings, a few people turn to look at him. At 3, he's still looking at it, I'm like "answer or mute it!"

#3. Thank you! This happened on the bus the other day. Gal had an obsessive bf she was meeting (she explained to bus driver). Her phone had what I admit was a fairly fun dance tune. Thank goodness for that because the bf called around 20 times during a 7 minute bus ride. And each time the dumb gal was like "OMG." and let the phone ring until it went to voicemail.