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[Phalla] Game Over! Way to go killer p.50 The Unfortunate Voyage of the Harbinger

Based on the level of signupsDay 1 will start at Monday, March 26 at 12:01 AM

Day 1 will end on Monday, March 26 at 10:00 PM Central
Special Powers must be PM'd by 9:00 PM Central

I'll try and put up some lore bits Saturday and Sunday to keep you occupied.

And remember: I have designed the game to allow for extras in five bit chunks. So if we get 11 reserves, I'll add 10 people to the game and have 1 reserve. This only applies to before the start of the game, obviously.

Munkus Beaver on March 2012

WiiU: munkusbeaver and Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
Steam name: munkus_beaver
Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
Twitter which gives health updates and the like: https://twitter.com/MunkusBeaver
Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.

Years before, at the start of the mission, you received the following message.

Welcome to the Harbinger!

I am the mainframe, Daedalus, constructed by the joint venture of the Dycon Corporation, the United Federation, and the Tri-System Commonwealth to make your journey a safe and pleasant one.

Our mission will last 3 Years and will take us to many scouted planets that have not yet been researched. We will be determining viability for colonization as well as conducting medical, biological, gravitational, and applied computer science research which will bring mankind to a new age of prosperity!

As with all Dycon research missions, we will carry a cadre of United Federation munitions and Marines in case of Xenobiological encounters of either the feral or sentient kind.

Munkus Beaver on March 2012

WiiU: munkusbeaver and Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
Steam name: munkus_beaver
Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
Twitter which gives health updates and the like: https://twitter.com/MunkusBeaver
Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.

Dear mafia: this space-cop is almost certainly just one more voyage from retirement or some such, please have some compassion and let me live!

Attention passengers! Right before we arrive at our destination, we will have a party celebrating all the wonderful years of service that peter rogers (gaslight) has given us! Come salute one of our special members up in the 10forward lounge at his special retirement party/funeral!

You could at least have scheduled that for when I was off duty so I could drink at my own party.

OK seriously guys, I am probably not going to be able to do a lot of RP in this phalla. Been years since I did any kind of forum RP even if I had the time. Not sure how much is expected based on the abortive first attempt at this game, but I just want to say that up front in case most people are RPing a lot and I'm not and someone decides to read something into that either way.

Gaslight, as the other cop/guard on the ship we have only two ways we can RP this.

Good Cop - Bad Cop

OR

Riggs - Murtaugh

You choose.

edit: or anything else, really. I just really like the idea of one of us yelling and being mean all the time and the other trying to soften everyone up. Also, Riggs and Murtaugh would be pretty hilarious.

Look guys, I know that we had that whole screw fiasco on our last trip, and I don't really want to relive that experience, what with the marines confiscating my supplies, the xenobiologists still refusing to talk to me over the Xenobites campaign, and our former chef, @Kime still AWOL, so I just wanted to make sure the Command Staff was aware that my stocks are 100% in compliance with standard Dycon Corporation regulations.

With that said, I'll remind you that as Quartermaster, I can "manufacture" scarcity issues, should we need to raise revenue. Just saying.

Thanks,

Assuran

PS: There is absolutely no truth to the rumors that I sold items explicitly banned from the voyage (recreational substances, unlicensed handguns, and black market electronics) for a 100% markup. None. At all. Really.

Assuran, do you really want our rifles to NOT have armor piercing capability? I mean yes, there is always the risk of us puncturing the ship's hull and causing a decompression, but we'll be perfectly safe in our power armor. We just need that extra kick to help squash any xenos that rear their ugly heads. So us confiscating those supplies is for your benefit! Just... don't be in the same compartment as us when we start shooting without a suit on.

Assuran, do you really want our rifles to NOT have armor piercing capability? I mean yes, there is always the risk of us puncturing the ship's hull and causing a decompression

How big a risk, exactly? I'm sure our passengers would just love to consider the thought that this crate is thin-skinned enough to suffer a hull breach from mere small arms fire any time you cowboys feel rambunctious. Would any of the Dycon representatives care to comment?

There has been an outbreak of undesirable diseases. Though I am no physician, it has fallen to me to track down the source. If you exhibit any symptoms of crotch rot, penile pustules, anal fissures, or the dreaded char trues plague please report to my laboratory. The sampling process has been designed to be as painless as possible, with minimal intrusion into your privacy.

There has been an outbreak of undesirable diseases. Though I am no physician, it has fallen to me to track down the source. If you exhibit any symptoms of crotch rot, penile pustules, anal fissures, or the dreaded char trues plague please report to my laboratory. The sampling process has been designed to be as painless as possible, with minimal intrusion into your privacy.

Thank you,
"Dr." Jeff

I would like to dispel the rumours that the source is Akimbo's Love Shack ™. There is mostly no evidence suggesting that this is the case, so you can enjoy your hedonistic pleasures without a care in the world.

Spoiler:

Akimbo's Love Shack ™ assumes no responsibility for any necrosis of the genitals or other related STIs you may contract while in Room 17-D

Small arms fire? Haha, we're equipped with a bit more than those second pea-shooters you guys get.

Look, hotshot, you don't impress me, I was a turret gunner on a Naga gunship in the last colony dustup - as far as I'm concerned, if one man on foot can carry it, it's a small arm.

Now on an unrelated note, everyone please stop bothering ship's security with your complaints about Akimbo's...establishment. That is a matter for the ship's Health, Medical, and Sanitation Services department.

Also, for those who learn how far down the rabbit hole goes in Akimbo's Love Shack and would like to dispel the eldrich horrors of kink from thier minds; Dr Bedlam's Psych office will now be offering complimentry "Forget me now" medications with every filling of a regular perscription.