Monday, January 21, 2013

The Turn Around

Jason asked me last night, "What are you going to type now? The rest of our story is relatively boring."

Ha. Ha. Ha.

It was when I read Jason's personality profile from the Myer and Briggs book Please Understand Me that I realized I really really was in trouble. Jason flippantly answered the questions thinking there was no way these stupid questions would be able to see into his soul and help explain and understand him in a way that people never had before. Ha. Ha. Ha.

I don't want to bore you with a lame personality test. But here are a few excerpts:

Not only impulsive, Crafters are fearless in their play, risking themselves again and again, despite frequent injury. Of all the types, this personality is most likely to pit themselves, or their technique, against chance odds There can be no end to the ways they seek thrills in their recreation, daring disaster for the fun of it. They thrive on excitement, especially the form of fast motion—racing, sky diving, or water-skiing, for instance.

As if the handing writing wasn't on the wall enough... the very last thing they say about this personality is:

These Crafters need their freedom to seek adventure, flying their plane, sailing their boat, racing their motorcycle, and mates who wish to keep them happy are wise to give them a long leash.

I find it almost ironic that the Daily Herald did this article about Jason and published it the day before our first conversation.

Anyway, I take my personality tests pretty seriously... so after discovering Jason's personality I realized that I had to decide. Either I was going to love him for who he was.... BASE jumping, dirt biking, sky diving, rock climbing, surfing, snow boarding, wake boarding and all... or I would have to walk away. So I spent the rest of the summer behind the camera watching stuff like this:

I'll tell the truth the first time Jason jumped off a cliff, I was a nervous wreck. Craig was a good sport and came with me. But after a while I wasn't scared at all. People all around me thought I was insane. I wouldn't be surprised if some people were even planning an intervention. But I knew if I love Jason, I have to love all of him.

What happened next I wasn't expecting or hoping for in any way but it is one of my favorite moments of our relationship. We had just gone and done a session at the San Diego Temple in October. After Jason decided to take me down to some cliffs in La Jolla area that I had never been before. We climbed down this steep trail and walked along the beach. We were talking about life and his friend that had just died in an accident. Some of the details were pretty gruesome and I was telling Jason I might not be able to handle it.

As the sun was setting with the ocean breeze swaying the palm trees (In Mitt Romney's backyard no less) Jason told me that he never wanted me to get that phone call. He told me he loved me too much and it wasn't worth it. What he suggested next I was so shocked I almost didn't know how to react. He suggested he sell his personalized constructed parachute and equipment that he had recently had made, that he had waited months to finally get.... to buy a ring.

There is a part of me that feels guilty. Every time I watch him watch a youtube video of a newly discovered jump or a recently put together highlight video of his friends. I know he loves it. I know he misses it. But more important, I know he wants a lifetime with me.