lard-ass n. A person who is not only useless, but also weighs a rediculous amount. Lard-asses usually eat Taco Bell three times a day with a Burger King snack in between, and food is always purchased with someone else's money. Other characteristics of a lard-ass include, but are not limited to: greasy skin, dull personality, lack of motivation, self-centered, and posess the ability to suck the life and finances out of those around him/her.

Cheryl is such a worthless lard-ass that when her ex-husband was being arrested, all she could think about was getting food from Del Taco.