On November 29, actress and activist Maria Bello penned a "Modern Love" column for the New York Times. It was a frank and moving piece about her family and her love life. In it, she revealed that she is currently in a relationship with a woman, whom she also calls her best friend. The headlines that followed? "Maria Bello Comes Out as Gay" and variations on that theme.

Headlines are reductive. They boil down a story to its essence in a way that lures a reader in. I would know. I'm guilty of writing a leading headline (or two or 20). But was "Maria Bello Gay" or "Maria Bello Bi" the essence of Bello's complicated and thoughtful piece? Of course not. So kudos to Bello, for taking to the Times again on Friday, to push back against those headlines she calls "disheartening."

"In reducing my story to those terms, they're missing the point," Bello writes. Her point, is that for her life (and really for most anyone's) labels—gay, straight, bi, partner, family—don't quite fit. And that's ok. And next time I write a headline, I'll try to summon Bello's thoughtfulness.