Ugh, so sorry! This must be so difficult! I hope the spotting stops soon. If it helps, I got pregnant this time right after an ectopic pregnancy. I have been a nervous wreck, but I'm at 30 weeks now and everything is going well, despite me being just positive that something was going to go horribly wrong. I hope you feel better soon, and that you have a long, healthy pregnancy :-)

Wife to Jordan.
Mommy to Everett Callan, born 2010 and Callie Sage Eilonwy, born 2013
and 2 fur babies: a male standard poodle named Shasta, and a female Australian shepherd named Scout.

If you have any questions about PCOS, infertility, ectopic pregnancy, or Cystic Fibrosis testing, please feel free to message me

Never been pregnant my self but if it's any encouragement my mom miscarried her second pregnancy but then went on to have my two brothers, three years apart after that! She then also miscarried her fifth pregnancy but then had my little sister less than 2 years later! She was nervous and had alot of dr's appointments with my sis but everything turned out fine! so although she miscarried twice she still has 4 healthy children now! hope your pregnancy goes well from this point forward too!

Whit32: it does help to hear about healthy, successful pregnancies after a loss so thank you for sharing your story. I'm so sorry you had to go thru an ectopic - one of my best friends had one as well and it was a nightmare. She had to get a chemotherapy drug injected a couple of times to force the pregnancy to end? She was really sick for a little while and it was terrible. Luckily, she also got pregnant again, maybe about a year later, and had a beautiful, healthy baby girl! It's just so annoying to have no control over anything. When you're younger, you think being pregnant is so easy and effortless - that's how tv and movies make it seem! Not to mention the fact that they make it seem like if you even think about sex you'll be pregnant. Ha! I really had no idea how hard it can be. I'm so envious or all the women who get preggo immediately and then sail thru their 10 months and pop out baby after baby! I'm super happy for you that you've made it to week 30 and I wish you nothing but smooth sailing the rest of the way. We aren't letting ourselves even think about names at this point, I can't wait to be as far as you are and really be able to think about the baby!
Averelladavina: thanks for sharing your mom's story, I always appreciate a happy ending! I know it's really scary but I think the number is something like 1 in 4 women will miscarry, up to 50% of pregnancies (when you include the ones who were so early, the women probably didn't even know they were preggo yet). It seems so strange to me that there's still so little we can do to prevent it! But I know, that's life and life isn't always fair. Oh well. Thanks again

I had to have the chemo shot also (called methotrexate). It was awful. I was sick and in quite a bit of pain for a week or so. Then I bled for about 3 weeks. Though, it was good that we found out about the ectopic early enough that I didn't have to have surgery. It does make me laugh when tv and movies make pregnancy look so easy. I saw a documentary one time where a woman talked about how much she loves how she feels when she's pregnant. She was on her fourth pregnancy and said sometimes she wanted to have another baby partly because of how wonderful pregnancy is. I wanted to throw something at her ;-) My pregnancies have both been miserable, and difficult to attain. I'm so envious of the fun pregnancy people out there.
As far as your question about why we can't prevent miscarriages, if you look at them completely scientifically, they make sense. Most of them happen because there is something wrong with the embryo. Something so wrong that the baby wouldn't be able to survive. If the pregnancy was allowed (or forced) to continue, the baby would likely be stillborn. The physical and emotional effects on the mother would be much worse than an early miscarriage. It's something of an evolutionary protection for the mother. Something that was especially important before the advent of medical intervention. This doesn't make miscarriage easier, but perhaps more understandable for me. Science tends to be my coping mechanism for a lot of things though :-) For me, it helps things make sense. For others, it probably seems rather cold. Just food for thought. Still praying everything is ok for you!

Wife to Jordan.
Mommy to Everett Callan, born 2010 and Callie Sage Eilonwy, born 2013
and 2 fur babies: a male standard poodle named Shasta, and a female Australian shepherd named Scout.

If you have any questions about PCOS, infertility, ectopic pregnancy, or Cystic Fibrosis testing, please feel free to message me

Hope you're doing okay?? Sending you good thoughts. Just to let you know, I was terrified everyday of my 1st trimester. It's what people don't tell you when you get pregnant. Even if you don't experience spotting, you're afraid of every twinge or cramp that you feel. Being pregnant in the very early weeks is NOT fun, and I don't know whoever started that rumor. I know you're just waiting it out, but know that you aren't alone, and even if women don't talk about it openly, pregnancy is really stressful in the beginning. For some women seeing that first U/S with a heartbeat is the milestone they need to hit before they relax. For others, it's clearing the 1st trimester hurdle. For me, it was the 20 week anatomy scan, but I didn't really relax until about now at week 30! It's a glorious experience to grow a baby, but the risks and the fears make it one of the most stressful life experiences, too. I never knew it until I did it because we don't talk about it with other women very often.