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March 4,1980
photo by Wim Cassard
Duffy Alberti is a British-cultured
American citizen. He speaks with a heavy
English accent and enjoys a spicy London
vocabulary. He usually converses sar­castically
and with confidence.
Duffy, or Daniel Franchesco Alberti,
was born in San Francisco on November
27, 1959 (Pond People, take note). He
has lived in San Francisco, Greece,
Mexico, the Dominican Republic, Bot­swana
(Africa), and also (boy, this one
really makes you envious!) Alexandria,
Va. He now resides in Georgetown.
Duffy’s father is in the ambassadorial
field and thus travels quite a bit. From
1976 to 1979, he was charge d’affaires
to the tiny nation of Botswana, a coun­try
of black rule economically reliant
on South Africa. He is currently acting
as political advisor to the Joint Chiefs
of Staff.
Duffy graduated from Trent College
in England. A “ college” in England is
any educational institution, high school
or otherwise, which offers advanced
level courses. Duffy, a hopeful future
ambassador, took “ A-level” courses in
English, Politics, and Economics.
Aside from diplomatic training, Duffy
came to St. Mary’s because “ It is small,
on the water, and it has a good male-female
ratio!”
England is his favorite country. He
says, “All my best friends are over
there. They definitely have the best pubs
in the world, what the hell!” But ser­iously,
Duffy, what about the people?
“The people are very proud, very pa­triotic.
The older ones still live in the
age of the empire. I think the younger
ones are more aware that the empire
that was is now gone.”
Of the countries he has travelled to,
he dislikes Mexico the most: “The
country is sleazy, a place where cor­ruption
and bribery are less the ex­ceptions
than the rule.”
He likes to listen to music on fine
stereos, preferably punk rock, rock and
roll, jazz, blues, or “ anything except
country music and opera.” He sails
quite a bit, and he likes to play tennis
and rugby occasionally.
On his American side, he basically
“ gets o f f ’ whenever he finds the time.
Sometimes he has to “call Ralph long
distance,” if he gets off too much.
“Ralph” is the sound made by reverse
peristalsis, the body’s defense against
bad Scotch.
Blimey! An English, punk-rocking am­bassador
with American hedonistic ten­dencies
and talents in the social sciences
and English? Reality never ceases to
astound!
-Rafe Shannon-
A n d y E a s t e r
He comes from central Texas where
the horned toads lurk and the rattle­snakes
reign. Since then he’s gone
through South Carolina, Portugal, Vir­ginia
Beach, California, and a half
dozen other worldly places. From each
experience he scrapes a bit of grit to
grind into his crusty self. Thus Charles
Andre Easter, known to the masses as
Crazy Andy, erstwhile poet, chef su­preme,
and official campus radical-at-large,
is mantled oyster-like in layers
of improbable contrast.
Andy is to Empath as beans are to
chili. He keeps vigil against reactionism
and other dangers. Technically, that
means he maintains the Paper Tiger
and Position/Opposition columns, along
with features and editorials of astringent
perception.
I f the boring must be stated, Andy
will confess that he’s a junior history
major, and spent time as an industrial
worker, commercial fisherman, and in the
Navy. He’d rather offer you a mug of
hot sake and a Tan trie massage, however,
and he’d be serious. Consider the dif­ficulty
of conducting an interview under
these conditions, if you will, and pardon
the sake spills.
The Navy days gave Andy insights
into both himself and the rest of humani­ty.
The greatest personal' discovery was
that he couldn’t stand the Navy, but
the other conclusion is more positive.
In the three years Andy has monitored
St. Mary’s, he’s seen it fall from a unique
place of learning to a diploma factory.
Of course this is true - the Me Genera­tion
has finally invaded Southern Mary­land.
He’d counter such folk by re­structuring
American society into a form
based on cooperation instead of competi­tion,
along the way “ seducing countless
women and causing great destruction
to the capitalist system.” First to go
would be preppies in alligator shirts
and freshmen who arrive at college
plump and self-basting out of high
school.
Put away your John Birch hotline,
though, as he admits a latent desire to
someday join the bourgeoisie. As a
contemporary biographer puts it, “He’s
a walking contradiction: partly truth
and partly fiction.”
-Martha Miller-
W i l l i a m C l a m u r r o
William Clamurro, a short, witty man
with a big smile, is very popular with
the students at St. Mary’s because he
makes learning a foreign language enjoy­able.
According to Dr. Clamurro, “Learn­ing
another language is not only fun but
also important” and that “ studying a
language in class is comparable to the
training an athlete gets before a game.”
This is so because a language is not really
learned until it is lived.
Clamurro expressed the importance of
foreign languages in the fields of medicine
‘Pafoeri Hiqen,
Dear Paper Tiger:
What are you, some first-class geek?
You should be the one to talk of man­ners.
You showed the manners of a pig
and the mentality of a match. You were
so concerned with your chauvinistic,
stereo-typical bullshit that your reply
came off as an irrelevant display of
ignorance. The actual problem has
nothing to do with cows, rather it deals
with phones. Your little bit of history
was trivial and had no coherency to the
problem. There once was a phone on
PG second right but after misuse, it was
removed. That was at least five years
ago. Now the new residents of that hall
must pay for the immaturities of those
who graduated by now.
One phone just isn’t enough for 60
girls. True some girls do stay on for
extended periods of time but that is
understandable. Sometimes you can’t say
everything in ten minutes. Most are not
local calls to chat, but rather usually
important calls from home. I ’m not
going to define important because each
person holds different values. Another
thing with long distance calls is the rates.
Most calls come after 6:00 p.m. when
the rates go down. As a result the phone
is in constant use. I will agree that there
is some amount of misuse as you men­tioned.
I know for a fact that there
have been times when people, not just
residents of the floor, but guys from
upstairs want to use the phone or are
expecting a call. When a call comes in
automatically the person requested is
not home and nine times out of ten,
in these instances, messages are not
gotten. This is unfair to us, but it is
because there are sixty girls all wanting
to use the same phone. I agree with
Georgianne that it would be fair to
give 2nd right a trial with their own
phone. I believe that it would alleviate
most of the problems with busy signals
and messages, and also clear the air of
the rivalry created between wings over
the one phone.
Give it some thought, Geek.
A PG second lefter
Dear PG second lefter:
So, I ’m a Paper Geek. Oh well, I have
been called a lot worse than that lately
over this stance that I have taken. Look
closely, do you see any concern in my
right eye? Well my left one doesn’t give
a damn either.
I f I would have said that the reason
that the girls of PG need an extra phone
on your floor is because women talk
more than men, you would have then
and there declared me a sexist pig and
then you would have sworn up and down
that it isn’t true. So I took the question
of why you need another telephone up
to your very floor and guess what your
hall mates told me? “We need two phones
because we talk more than men do.”
Almost every one whom I asked told
me the very same thing. I ask you, “ Is
this fair?” I personally do not believe
that there is any biological reason for
this theory. Indeed, because your very
friends subscribe to it, I am a bit wary
of repeating it. Right from the horse’s
mouth so to speak. You say that sixty
girls having to share one phone causes
undue hardships and rivalry between
the wings. Consider that there are at
least a dozen more residents on the third
floor than the second floor and they,
too, must share one phone. I lived on
that third floor, at the very end of the
and social services. He says, “Exposure
to any foreign language expands one’s
language competence in the broadest
sense; getting to know another language
not only improves English grammar,
but also helps one to learn about other
cultures, literature, and history.” Last,
Clamurro stressed his belief that foreign
language study is easily within one’s
grasp and is a valuable asset in our world.
Therefore, language study should ideally
be an important part of any good college
education.
Clamurro was born in San Antonio,
Texas, but he grew up in New Jersey.
After high school he attended Amherst
College in New England where he ma­jored
in English. After graduation from
Amherst, Dr. Clamurro travelled to the
West Coast and enrolled at the University
of Washington in Seattle to begin his
graduate studies. The pursuit of his
master’s degree was briefly interrupted
in 1969 when he was drafted and sent to
Viet Nam. He gained valuable experience
as a medical corpsman in Nam which he
likes to pass on to his students. In 1971,
after his honorable discharge, Clamurro
returned to the University of Washington
to complete his graduate studies.
Clamurro taught in Mexico for two
years after graduation, then returned to
the East where he taught Spanish at
Montclair State College in New Jersey.
He stayed at Mont Clair State until the
fall of 1978 when he came to St. Mary’s
College.
Professor Clamurro teaches English as
well as Spanish and also instructs students
on the oboe which he has been playing
since the age of twelve. His other in­terests
are translating Latin phrases and
keeping up on current events.
Besides teaching, Clamurro also enjoys
writing and translating Spanish works
into English. He’s now working on a
study of the short plays of the classic
Don_Quixote^by Cervantes
Dr. Clamurro likes teaching at St.
Mary’s College. He sees his enthusiasm
for foreign language, study rubbing off
on the students who have almost doubled
the enrollment of Spanish classes since he
began teaching here.
-Tim Graney-
--------------------------- page 7
right wing as a matter of fact, and I
can’t recall any undue hardships or rivalry
that the situation caused. Tell me Miss
Anonymous, why is it that the floor with
fewer people needs more phones than
the floor with more people? Why should
your floor be special and more privileged
than the one above you? I repeat, i f I
would have said that it was because of
gender, then you would have said I was
being sexist, but when your own people
on your floor tell me that it is because
you all talk more than men, then that
is alright, isn’t it? Damn the double
standard and full speed ahead.
I do realize however that an apology
is in order for those of you that are
respectful of other peoples’ needs and do
not usually hog (or should I' say sow)
the phone. This means that the silent
majority of you young ladies of second
floor PG can rest assured that my cutting
pen was not directed at you, but at
those chattering harpies that you find
babbling away constantly. My regrets
to most of you.
That being settled, let me ask you a
question, Miss Anonymous. I ’ve always
noticed that those who are the most
guilty scream murder the loudest. How
many hours each week do YOU log on
that phone my dear? Chances are that
the main culprit is you, yourself.
Paper “Geek” Tiger

March 4,1980
photo by Wim Cassard
Duffy Alberti is a British-cultured
American citizen. He speaks with a heavy
English accent and enjoys a spicy London
vocabulary. He usually converses sar­castically
and with confidence.
Duffy, or Daniel Franchesco Alberti,
was born in San Francisco on November
27, 1959 (Pond People, take note). He
has lived in San Francisco, Greece,
Mexico, the Dominican Republic, Bot­swana
(Africa), and also (boy, this one
really makes you envious!) Alexandria,
Va. He now resides in Georgetown.
Duffy’s father is in the ambassadorial
field and thus travels quite a bit. From
1976 to 1979, he was charge d’affaires
to the tiny nation of Botswana, a coun­try
of black rule economically reliant
on South Africa. He is currently acting
as political advisor to the Joint Chiefs
of Staff.
Duffy graduated from Trent College
in England. A “ college” in England is
any educational institution, high school
or otherwise, which offers advanced
level courses. Duffy, a hopeful future
ambassador, took “ A-level” courses in
English, Politics, and Economics.
Aside from diplomatic training, Duffy
came to St. Mary’s because “ It is small,
on the water, and it has a good male-female
ratio!”
England is his favorite country. He
says, “All my best friends are over
there. They definitely have the best pubs
in the world, what the hell!” But ser­iously,
Duffy, what about the people?
“The people are very proud, very pa­triotic.
The older ones still live in the
age of the empire. I think the younger
ones are more aware that the empire
that was is now gone.”
Of the countries he has travelled to,
he dislikes Mexico the most: “The
country is sleazy, a place where cor­ruption
and bribery are less the ex­ceptions
than the rule.”
He likes to listen to music on fine
stereos, preferably punk rock, rock and
roll, jazz, blues, or “ anything except
country music and opera.” He sails
quite a bit, and he likes to play tennis
and rugby occasionally.
On his American side, he basically
“ gets o f f ’ whenever he finds the time.
Sometimes he has to “call Ralph long
distance,” if he gets off too much.
“Ralph” is the sound made by reverse
peristalsis, the body’s defense against
bad Scotch.
Blimey! An English, punk-rocking am­bassador
with American hedonistic ten­dencies
and talents in the social sciences
and English? Reality never ceases to
astound!
-Rafe Shannon-
A n d y E a s t e r
He comes from central Texas where
the horned toads lurk and the rattle­snakes
reign. Since then he’s gone
through South Carolina, Portugal, Vir­ginia
Beach, California, and a half
dozen other worldly places. From each
experience he scrapes a bit of grit to
grind into his crusty self. Thus Charles
Andre Easter, known to the masses as
Crazy Andy, erstwhile poet, chef su­preme,
and official campus radical-at-large,
is mantled oyster-like in layers
of improbable contrast.
Andy is to Empath as beans are to
chili. He keeps vigil against reactionism
and other dangers. Technically, that
means he maintains the Paper Tiger
and Position/Opposition columns, along
with features and editorials of astringent
perception.
I f the boring must be stated, Andy
will confess that he’s a junior history
major, and spent time as an industrial
worker, commercial fisherman, and in the
Navy. He’d rather offer you a mug of
hot sake and a Tan trie massage, however,
and he’d be serious. Consider the dif­ficulty
of conducting an interview under
these conditions, if you will, and pardon
the sake spills.
The Navy days gave Andy insights
into both himself and the rest of humani­ty.
The greatest personal' discovery was
that he couldn’t stand the Navy, but
the other conclusion is more positive.
In the three years Andy has monitored
St. Mary’s, he’s seen it fall from a unique
place of learning to a diploma factory.
Of course this is true - the Me Genera­tion
has finally invaded Southern Mary­land.
He’d counter such folk by re­structuring
American society into a form
based on cooperation instead of competi­tion,
along the way “ seducing countless
women and causing great destruction
to the capitalist system.” First to go
would be preppies in alligator shirts
and freshmen who arrive at college
plump and self-basting out of high
school.
Put away your John Birch hotline,
though, as he admits a latent desire to
someday join the bourgeoisie. As a
contemporary biographer puts it, “He’s
a walking contradiction: partly truth
and partly fiction.”
-Martha Miller-
W i l l i a m C l a m u r r o
William Clamurro, a short, witty man
with a big smile, is very popular with
the students at St. Mary’s because he
makes learning a foreign language enjoy­able.
According to Dr. Clamurro, “Learn­ing
another language is not only fun but
also important” and that “ studying a
language in class is comparable to the
training an athlete gets before a game.”
This is so because a language is not really
learned until it is lived.
Clamurro expressed the importance of
foreign languages in the fields of medicine
‘Pafoeri Hiqen,
Dear Paper Tiger:
What are you, some first-class geek?
You should be the one to talk of man­ners.
You showed the manners of a pig
and the mentality of a match. You were
so concerned with your chauvinistic,
stereo-typical bullshit that your reply
came off as an irrelevant display of
ignorance. The actual problem has
nothing to do with cows, rather it deals
with phones. Your little bit of history
was trivial and had no coherency to the
problem. There once was a phone on
PG second right but after misuse, it was
removed. That was at least five years
ago. Now the new residents of that hall
must pay for the immaturities of those
who graduated by now.
One phone just isn’t enough for 60
girls. True some girls do stay on for
extended periods of time but that is
understandable. Sometimes you can’t say
everything in ten minutes. Most are not
local calls to chat, but rather usually
important calls from home. I ’m not
going to define important because each
person holds different values. Another
thing with long distance calls is the rates.
Most calls come after 6:00 p.m. when
the rates go down. As a result the phone
is in constant use. I will agree that there
is some amount of misuse as you men­tioned.
I know for a fact that there
have been times when people, not just
residents of the floor, but guys from
upstairs want to use the phone or are
expecting a call. When a call comes in
automatically the person requested is
not home and nine times out of ten,
in these instances, messages are not
gotten. This is unfair to us, but it is
because there are sixty girls all wanting
to use the same phone. I agree with
Georgianne that it would be fair to
give 2nd right a trial with their own
phone. I believe that it would alleviate
most of the problems with busy signals
and messages, and also clear the air of
the rivalry created between wings over
the one phone.
Give it some thought, Geek.
A PG second lefter
Dear PG second lefter:
So, I ’m a Paper Geek. Oh well, I have
been called a lot worse than that lately
over this stance that I have taken. Look
closely, do you see any concern in my
right eye? Well my left one doesn’t give
a damn either.
I f I would have said that the reason
that the girls of PG need an extra phone
on your floor is because women talk
more than men, you would have then
and there declared me a sexist pig and
then you would have sworn up and down
that it isn’t true. So I took the question
of why you need another telephone up
to your very floor and guess what your
hall mates told me? “We need two phones
because we talk more than men do.”
Almost every one whom I asked told
me the very same thing. I ask you, “ Is
this fair?” I personally do not believe
that there is any biological reason for
this theory. Indeed, because your very
friends subscribe to it, I am a bit wary
of repeating it. Right from the horse’s
mouth so to speak. You say that sixty
girls having to share one phone causes
undue hardships and rivalry between
the wings. Consider that there are at
least a dozen more residents on the third
floor than the second floor and they,
too, must share one phone. I lived on
that third floor, at the very end of the
and social services. He says, “Exposure
to any foreign language expands one’s
language competence in the broadest
sense; getting to know another language
not only improves English grammar,
but also helps one to learn about other
cultures, literature, and history.” Last,
Clamurro stressed his belief that foreign
language study is easily within one’s
grasp and is a valuable asset in our world.
Therefore, language study should ideally
be an important part of any good college
education.
Clamurro was born in San Antonio,
Texas, but he grew up in New Jersey.
After high school he attended Amherst
College in New England where he ma­jored
in English. After graduation from
Amherst, Dr. Clamurro travelled to the
West Coast and enrolled at the University
of Washington in Seattle to begin his
graduate studies. The pursuit of his
master’s degree was briefly interrupted
in 1969 when he was drafted and sent to
Viet Nam. He gained valuable experience
as a medical corpsman in Nam which he
likes to pass on to his students. In 1971,
after his honorable discharge, Clamurro
returned to the University of Washington
to complete his graduate studies.
Clamurro taught in Mexico for two
years after graduation, then returned to
the East where he taught Spanish at
Montclair State College in New Jersey.
He stayed at Mont Clair State until the
fall of 1978 when he came to St. Mary’s
College.
Professor Clamurro teaches English as
well as Spanish and also instructs students
on the oboe which he has been playing
since the age of twelve. His other in­terests
are translating Latin phrases and
keeping up on current events.
Besides teaching, Clamurro also enjoys
writing and translating Spanish works
into English. He’s now working on a
study of the short plays of the classic
Don_Quixote^by Cervantes
Dr. Clamurro likes teaching at St.
Mary’s College. He sees his enthusiasm
for foreign language, study rubbing off
on the students who have almost doubled
the enrollment of Spanish classes since he
began teaching here.
-Tim Graney-
--------------------------- page 7
right wing as a matter of fact, and I
can’t recall any undue hardships or rivalry
that the situation caused. Tell me Miss
Anonymous, why is it that the floor with
fewer people needs more phones than
the floor with more people? Why should
your floor be special and more privileged
than the one above you? I repeat, i f I
would have said that it was because of
gender, then you would have said I was
being sexist, but when your own people
on your floor tell me that it is because
you all talk more than men, then that
is alright, isn’t it? Damn the double
standard and full speed ahead.
I do realize however that an apology
is in order for those of you that are
respectful of other peoples’ needs and do
not usually hog (or should I' say sow)
the phone. This means that the silent
majority of you young ladies of second
floor PG can rest assured that my cutting
pen was not directed at you, but at
those chattering harpies that you find
babbling away constantly. My regrets
to most of you.
That being settled, let me ask you a
question, Miss Anonymous. I ’ve always
noticed that those who are the most
guilty scream murder the loudest. How
many hours each week do YOU log on
that phone my dear? Chances are that
the main culprit is you, yourself.
Paper “Geek” Tiger