According to Google, today is the 79th anniversary of the Drive-In Theater. I have very fond memories of summer nights spent at the drive-in; nights that span most of my 47 years. Most drive-in theaters are kaput, and have been for quite some time. However, I am lucky enough to have a fully operational, good old-fashioned drive-in theater in the next town over.

But more on that later. First, let’s go back in time…

My first drive-in experiences were at The Hackensack Drive-in in Little Ferry, NJ, a short drive down Rt. 46 from my hometown. It was located right next to a bridge, and even if we weren’t going to the movies, it was always cool to watch what was playing on the big screen as we drove by. My parents took us to this theater often, but not to see the latest Disney offering.

They would cover the back of the station wagon with blankets and pillows, and take us to see the movies they wanted to see. We were just thrilled to get out of the house and play in the rusty playground right under the screen. Once we were tired, and filled with popcorn and soda, we’d crash in the rear of the wagon, and mom and dad had the night to themselves.

Some of the movies we were dragged to were priceless – movies that no kid would have the slightest interest in seeing – movies like “A Man Called Horse,” “Walkabout” and “Bang the Drum Slowly.” I don’t mean to infer that these are bad movies, but to a 7 year old? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

When I got older, I’d go to this very same theater with my friends John & Joe. We saw “Moonraker” in the pouring rain, and a plethora of bad horror films like “Don’t Look in the Basement” and “Last House on the Left.” Sadly, the Hackensack Drive-in was torn down in the 80’s and replaced by apartment buildings. Boo. However, there was another theater to take it’s place.

Enter the Paramus Drive-in.

My lord did I have fun at that place. It had always been there, but with the Hackensack theater so close to us, we never went to the Paramus Drive-in. But once John and I discovered that place, we were there most weekends in the summer. One of the pluses to this theater was that the sound came in over the radio. No more scratchy window speakers that let out the AC and let in the mosquitoes.

At first they charged admission by the person. That’s when we’d park outside the entrance and put 3 or 4 people in the trunk of my Pontiac Catalina. The driver and shotgun passenger would pay for themselves and once in and parked (far from the ticket taker and snack stand) we’d open the trunk and let out our fellow movie goers. I think we got caught once and had to pay for our stow-aways, but we got away with it most of the time. Then they changed their admission to one price per carload, which while a bit more convenient, took some of the fun out of the evening.

Paramus had quite a few movie theaters – it was sort of the place to go if you wanted to see the latest blockbuster. Therefore, the drive-in, not being able to compete with the big mega-plexes, showed movies that were off the radar. And those kinds of movies were right up our alley. My best friend John and I loved bizarre, crusty movies, and they would play 2 or 3 of these in a row. From dusk to 1 am we would bust on some of the worst movies to ever come out of Hollywood, and usually drink lots of beer – another good feature of the drive-in.

Uff Da!

I can remember there being a Russ Meyer weekend, and John and I sat through “Super Vixens” and “Beneath the Valley of the Ultra Vixens.” What a pair, and I’m not just talking about the movies! Boobs, boobs and more boobs! What was the plot? I don’t remember!

Saturday nights at the Paramus Drive-in also introduced me to gems like “The Warriors,” “Piranha,” (were talking the original 1978 version), and “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” Seeing Leatherface stalk that group of unsuspecting teens in a drive in was scary enough, but the cut our theater got was really rough, and it made the movie seem like a snuff film. It was super creepy.

The Paramus Drive-In followed in the path of many drive-ins and closed in the late 80’s. I had gone years and years with only memories of my drive in experiences until we moved to Virginia. After setting up residence in our Lake Community, I saw a flyer at a gas station promoting the upcoming movie schedule at the Fork Union Drive in.

What? A drive-in? Really? A few weeks later, we drove in to see Clockstoppers & Ice Age. My youngest daughter was just an infant at the time, but my oldest was 7 and adored it. I have to confess, we don’t go that often – usually because my youngest was always such a handful as a child it was easier to just avoid the movies all together other than renting DVDs.

The Fork Union Drive-In: Small, Cheesy and Utterly Wonderful

But last year my oldest wanted to go to meet a bunch of kids from school, and we all went, and it was really fun. My kids got to run around with friends while my husband and I spent the entire first movie trying to figure out how to keep our hatchback open without the dome light coming on. After that I fell asleep.

Wait, didn’t I do that as a child too?

I’m just glad that we have one of these cinematic gems nearby. Thanks to our lousy HOA, my kids don’t get to live the thrill of chasing the ice cream truck – but dammit, they know the joy of watching a bad double feature under the stars.

Remember the weekend when the Paramus Drive In ran movies that all had “Don’t” in the title? There was:

“Don’t Look In The Basement” – that was first time we saw that psyco hospital flick uncut & we all decided we liked the TV version better

“Don’t Open The Window” – a silly but fun very badly dubbed zombie flick that we all enjoyed mocking. I remember that all of the women’s voices seemd to be dubbed by the same woman. This flick has been released under several titles & I know this because I caught it at a drive-in in Syracuse & it was called “Let Sleeping Corpses Lie” & realized after 5 minutes that I’d already seen it. It popped up on late night cable in the 1980s as “Night of the Rising Dead”

“Don’t Go In The House” – a real sicko mamas boy sets his dates on fire with a flame thrower…we drew the line at that one as it was unpleasant & boring so we left & never got to see the 4th feature “Don’t Go In The Woods…Alone!”

I think Artie Jones made the pun that the first feature should have been “Don’t See These Movies”!

You are so right on about “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre”. You just had no idea of how far that movie would go because it really did look like either a documentary or a snuff film. When you saw a movie like “Carrie” or “Rosemary’s Baby” or even “The Exorcist” you knew there was a line that the film makers would not cross but the origional “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” was the first time I remember thinking “holy crap, the people who made this have no limits”!

I’ve seen this film several times since & its still scary but here’s the funny thing–there is no gore. None. Everything is implied but never shown. The only time you see actual blood being shed is

**SPOLIER ALERT**

when the crazy hitchiker (who ends up being part of Leatherface’s family) cuts his hand on purpose in the van

**END SPOILER ALERT****

That really shows what a great horror film it is!Also remember that the drive in was in back of the mall, in the woods, which added to the atmosphere

…and I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that great double feature of “The Warriors” & “Up In Smoke”. Two movies you’d never independently put together but man was it a GREAT double bill!

Whoever programmed that drive in had an amazing sense of humor & showmanship! Along with the night of the “Don’t” movies they did that Russ Meyer-athon you mentioned, ran 3 John Waters films one night (“Polyester”, “Pink Flamingoes” & “Female Trouble”) & I think they ran the original “Piranha” on a bill with “Rock & Roll High School”.

See, you should write my blog! Your memory is better than mine. I mentioned “The Warriors” “Piranha” but had zero clue as to what the other movie was! And thankfully I missed the John Waters weekend. Maybe you went with Judy to that one.