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As much as I love my husband’s penis, there are just some things that he cannot provide to me from a sexual stimulation standpoint on his on (to no fault of his own for what it’s worth). Those gaps in sexual pleasure are more than adequately filled through the use of sex toys. Sure, I use sex toys all the time to get off when I’m alone and in need of some sexual release, but what you probably were not thinking was that I use sex toys even while I’m having sex with Seth. Here is how we do it.

Although there are a wide range of sex toys that make up the sex industry, I personally have only ever focused on the use of vibrators. In fact, I found this really great article from Blissful Cherry detailing all variety of vibrator types that exist and that you can ultimately get. Using that list alone, I have been able to build up quite a nice collection of vibrators for a variety of situations. Luckily for this article, vibrators are the sex toy of choice for women, so despite my propensity for only using vibrators, my story should be relatable to most women who use (or are planning to start using) sex toys.

What I love most about vibrators is their ability to vibrate! Shocker I know. But when you think about it, that’s the one major thing that sets itself apart from any real man’s penis. However, there are also some subtle advantages to using various vibrators as well – Rabbit vibrators stimulate your vagina internally as well as your clitoris, G-Spot vibrators allow easy access to your G-Spot, and there are even vibrators intended to go into your butt for anal vibrations (I personally haven’t bought one of those… yet). As you can see, (and each one being quite different from the next), so why wouldn’t you incorporate that into your sex life?

Now, you might be saying to yourself – “Well May, how much can you really incorporate both a vibrator and a penis during sex when you only have one vagina?”

And the answer to that is this: quite a lot actually, if you get creative with your positions. First off, you always have your butthole that is perfect for double penetration (with the vibrator going into either hole, depending on your preference). Or if you aren’t a girl who does “butt stuff”, you can still use a vibrator just on your clit while you are being penetrated vaginally by a man as well. And don’t forget about your mouth and how strongly that plays into sex as well – you can be giving your partner oral sex while also stimulating your vagina with a vibrator at the same time. Heck, you can even just use a vibrator on your nipples as well, while your partner works on your vagina (either eating you out or just plain old vaginal intercourse). The possibilities are nearly endless (depending on what sort of vibrators you have on hand) – the key here is to be creative with your sex positions.

In fact, now that I think about it, having that creativity and involving all sorts of unique and kinky ways to use your man’s penis along with a sex toy at the same time is a big part of the fun and the overall appeal as well in my opinion. You aren’t just limited to your basic sex positions any more once you get some sex toys into the mix, which makes for the perfect way to spice up your sex life.

One key to making this all work though is having a partner who truly understands where you are coming from in your quest for the ultimate sexual satisfaction. I know plenty of ex-boyfriends who would have gotten so offended if I ever suggested using a vibrator during sex, as if his penis wasn’t good enough. But to be honest, in a lot of cases – a man’s penis alone truly isn’t good enough. At least not from a purely sexual standpoint. There’s a reason most women don’t orgasm during sex! Sometimes, women need a little extra help to achieve maximum sexual pleasure and sex toys are an obvious way of doing that. Your lover shouldn’t be offended by that fact, but rather be aroused by the fact that you want to try something as kinky as incorporating sex toys into the bedroom with him!

Luckily for me, Seth knew exactly where I was coming from when I brought this all up to him the very first time about a year into dating, and that’s one of the reasons I fell in love with him honestly. And obviously sex toys during sex isn’t an every night sort of thing – just when I need the extra spark. For us personally we probably only have sex with sex toys about once a week. This is the perfect frequency for me personally, giving me a nice uplift in sexual pleasure to look forward to every week, but it really all depends on what you and your partner agree on doing.

Hopefully after reading my story, you no longer just think that sex toys are for self-pleasure only. With just a little bit of creativity, a regular sex session can become out of this world through incorporating some of your favorite sex toys. The choice is ultimately up to you (and your partner) to decide if having sex in this manner is right for you. But for Seth and I personally, all we can say is that sex with sex toys doesn’t get much better than that!