How to Wind Down Mindfully and Relax Before Bed

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Hey There Angel,

Today I want to jam on how to wind down your day with ease. If you’re like me, it’s easy to get into the habit of cramming in as much as possible to your already-crazy schedule. When I take off my work hat and step back into my role as wife to my guy and mom to my dogs (and caretaker of my garden!), I find a whole other (gigantic) to-do list waiting for me. Sometimes I push so hard that I’m dead to the world the second I hit the pillow. On those nights, I don’t sleep so well and you better believe I guzzle coffee the next day, then follow it up with sugary stuff to fight my fatigue.

But on nights when I wind down mindfully, I have the most restful sleeps, and productive days follow. So what does that look like—a calming, mindful evening? Let’s find out!

Here are my 5 favorite nighttime wind down practices:

1. Start earlier: Yes, there’s laundry to do, stuff to organize and piles that won’t put themselves away. But the more amped up we get before we go to bed, the harder it is to settle in and drift off. If I don’t get eight hours of sleep on a consistent basis, my everything suffers—especially my health. So here’s the tip: Ween yourself off the late night putter and those racking and stacking Netflix marathons! Your body, brains and beauty will be so grateful to you.

2. Take a hot shower or bath: Nothing soothes your nervous system like warm water. It washes the day and stress away. Apparently, the water raises our body temperature by one to two degrees, and so the immediate cool down period we experience clicks us into relaxation mode. Aaahhh. Here’s a great bathtub soaking recipe: Add 2 cups epsom salt, 1/2 cup raw apple cider vinegar, 1/4 cup baking soda and a few dashes of lavender to warm water. Try it next time you lounge in the tub. Light a candle. Let it all go. And while a hot shower or bath will definitely soothe your bones, you don’t want to sleep in a hot room. Keep it cool, baby. Ideally, you’ll want your bedroom temp to be between 67 and 70 degrees.

3. Be careful with the stimulants: Coffee past noon and too much alcohol at night mess with our natural sleep rhythms, as does nicotine, which raises your heart rate and brain activity. While I love a good glass of wine every once in awhile, more than one makes me wicked drowsy and then pops me awake a few hours later. Yuck. Dread. And once I’m up, I often have a hard time snoozing again. Another stimulant to keep in check is that super-engaging iPad screen! Typically, your body uses the hormone melatonin to help make you sleepy, but here’s the thing: Melatonin won’t release properly if you’re exposed to too much light. So for the sake of your health, leave the electronics out of your room. Oh, and one more tip: If you have trouble balancing your blood sugar, eat a teaspoon or two of almond butter before bed or if you wake up with insomnia. This really helps!

4. Prep the night before: Lay your clothes out. Pack your bags. Do whatever you have to do to ensure you’re not rushing around in the morning. I can’t believe I’m going to tell you this, but one morning last year I was late for the airport, and I literally walked out the door without my pants. Full disclosure: I had underwear and shorts on, but totally forgot my trousers. You know how it goes: you’re curling your hair, trying to put on makeup without blinding yourself, cramming stuff into your suitcase and bam! No pants. LOL.

Another way to prep is to get your juice and smoothie stuff ready to go so it’s waiting for you in the AM. Figure out what you’re going to make, wash it, prep it, put it in Debbie Meyer green bags (they extend the life of your produce) and then whip up your goodness first thing. Trust me, this one tip saves oodles of time. For yummy recipes, you can order my book Crazy Sexy Juice. I promise to blow your taste buds away. 😉

5. Do the 3 wins exercise (OMG, I love this one and I’m so excited to share it with you. Please try it!): I learned this exercise from a friend of mine and I do it with my husband and friends all the time.

Download my 3 Wins Worksheet to doze off peacefully tonight:

Here’s an example of 3 of my wins from this summer:

1. I went camping and rafting for the first time and it was epically fun—and I pooped in the wilderness. Never done that before. I used to think camping was opening the windows! I’ve definitely made progress.

2. Buddy (my disabled dog) got really confident using his wheelie cart to motor around. It took a while, but with a lot of encouragement and work, he’s zooming like a champ.

3. I fell madly in love with my garden and I’m so grateful to have that creative space to learn and grow, grow, grow.

So there you have it, my love—a few ideas for how you can wind down mindfully.Your turn: Either share how you like to wind down or share one of your recent wins! I’d love to hear.

Loved this advice! Especially the 3 Wins. I sometimes will write out “to dos” which gets the wheels turning – not as effective for relaxing :). Wins puts a nice close on the day, much more peaceful. Will share.

Thanks for these tips! I want to get better about turning off my computer earlier in the night before I’m heading to bed.

Another thing that I find really helpful is doing a short meditation before bed. This helps me clear my head and find a calm state so that I can fall asleep more quickly, without having to sort through my rambling stream of thoughts that I otherwise tend to get caught up in as I’m laying in bed.

I actually laughed out loud at the “no pants” part! Great tips Kris, thank you! Lately it seems like if I work out in the evening as opposed to the morning, I sleep better, which is opposite of what I thought. Or, maybe it’s that I take a warm shower at night and don’t drink wine if I workout at night! LOL

I have a question about the wine, coffee and sugary things you mentioned- I haven’t had any of those in just over two years since like four days after my diagnosis (Surprise! You’ve got cancer, stage IV.) when I devoured your books in between crying in the bathtub. I’m in grad school with zero alcohol and zero coffee. Zero chocolate of the non-cacao nib type. And people are like, just have ooone glass, it’s not going to make your cancer come back, and I’m like dude, I don’t know that, I don’t want to feed any life-stealing cells that may be floating around. I want to have done everything I could.

I like these tips. Also, I make sure the clock is dim because when I do wake up in the middle of the night, I find that not knowing what time it is helps me fall back to sleep easily. When I used to look at the clock, I found that my mind would instantly calculate how much time I had left and begin planning the day. 3 wins – love the positive mindset!

I baked my first load of bread yesterday. Okay, my first and second. The first was two inches thick and fifteen pounds, but the second was delicious and my kids ate it for breakfast with homemade peach jam. That’s a win for this guy!

The way to wind down was awesome, my doctor told me a couple of years ago. If I want a good night sleep I needed to stop everything get into bed a couple of hours just to let my body unwind & relax, I would be able to get a good night sleep. And yes it works. So thank you for sharing with us what you learned about falling asleep it was also helpful.

Ive been having a hard time falling asleep lately so when I got this email in my inbox I was like How Perfect! My mind just wont shut off! Thanks so much for the tips. I drink green tea around 2 pm when I need to get my kids from school. Do you think that could be effecting my natural rhythm? Love your blog Kris!

Shirley!! You are rockin’ it!! Your yoga practice is inspiring – and just that, a practice not a perfect. Keeping that in mind will make it easier to continue greeting your falls with laughter and trying over and over again! You will indeed kick those doctors and skip right out of their offices and their lives!! Why do we think it’s okay to amputate parts of ourselves that are just crying out for love and care?? There is such wisdom in our symptoms if we would incline our hearts and ears to hear their message. GO GIRL!!! You inspire!

Love your posts….that was sooo funny, remember my first poop in the wilderness like is was yesterday, and being immensely proud of it! Going free camping in the south of France with no make-up, washing yourself in the river, and sleeping in a bus transformed as a camper van, still greatfull for that experience…not bad for an Amsterdam born and raised city girl…wishing all of you loads of new experiences and wild camping trips!

Oooh, oooh, oooh!!!! Kris, I LOVE the 3 wins (talk about raising one’s frequency, yay!). I also really, really appreciate how “real” and down to earth you are, i.e., admitting that you sometimes guzzle coffee or eat sugary stuff or walk out the door without your pants!!! (something I’d totally do) – we all have what we might label as our “weak” moments — it’s part of the human experience — Thank you for not preaching from on high from some unreachable pedestal. I love you xO

I finished my book on my cancer journey! (You and your book, Crazy, Sexy, cancer Tips, are mentioned and quoted, Kris). I graduated as a health coach and retired as a nurse after 46 years.
I recently read an article about 5 yoga poses to do before going to sleep…..shared on my Facebook pages Wellness Coach Linda

My big win for the summer, was that I got bit by the monarch butterfly, and fell in love with amazing insect. I raised close to 1,300 caterpillars and watched them emerge into beautiful butterflies with the aid of zippered mesh containers called caterpillar castles and about $1000 worth of milkweed from the nursery. I am currently tagging my last batch of over 300, which will migrate to Mexico. Hopefully some of mine will be identified when they arrive. This amazing insect is close to being listed on the endangered species list. If you’re not familiar with the monarch this is the orange and black butterfly that migrates to Mexico for the winter and flies back in the spring to start munching on milkweed and laying it’s eggs. This will start a new generation that typically lives 2 to 6 weeks, each generation will make its way north as far as Canada, and then after about the fourth generation of these short lived versions, the super monarch is born and it is the one wired to fly all the way to Mexico for the winter and lives approximately six months. I started raising monarchs about five years ago when I started with a kit purchased on the Internet and had about 10 caterpillars. Each year my rearing talents improve and this year….kind of got out of control! I enjoy sharing the battle that this insect is currently fighting, by having butterfly releasing parties, where I educating the family and kids in the neighborhood and take them to nursing homes as well. Long live the Monarchs!

I have been following your incredible suggestions for health and vitality for three years. And, yes, I’ve purchased your well-drafted books (actually, a good friend gave me Crazy Sexy Kitchen…amazing!) and, also being a c-word survivor, I live as close to a near perfect healthy life as possible, with a few detours now and then (the business trip where I forego the Amazing Grass mixture for good ole bacon and eggs…hard to resist sometimes).

In my quest for mindfullness, relaxation and spiritual combo plates, I have found something called ruckschau, German for ‘look back’, a successful practice in relieving the mind of all that can hamper sleep and peace. I learned the easy practice by joining in Jin Shin Jyutsu classes, the self-healing mechanism that works well to heal the body.

Ruckschau is simple. Once you lay down in bed, you literally review everything you did from putting your head on the pillow backward. An example: I just laid down, I took off my makeup, I brushed my teeth, I pee’d, I walked up the stairs to my bedroom, I watched Bloodine, I had an apple, I ate blah blah for dinner, had an argument over taxes with Ed…you get the drift. The idea is to revisit all that happened so you can relieve yourself from any bad feelings that may have occurred during the course of the day but also just fall asleep! I’m always out before I hit lunch!

Try it…it’s amazing how you rid yourself of bad feelings and get some well-deserved zzzzzs!

I definitely struggle getting to sleep sometimes. I am a night owl, but unfortunately the word of work and school requires me to be up earlier than I would like. Sticking to a schedule even on the weekends has helped, even though it’s a drag sometimes. Looking forward to adding the 3 wins.

I love these great ideas! The 3 wins excercise made me think about how how to revamp my to-do lists. Instead of calling it a “to-do” list, I’ll call it my “win” list. This will keep me motivated because every completed task is a win! Thanks a million Kris!

A wind-down ritual that I love: every night about 2 hours before bed, I select a calming, relaxing essential oil and let it begin diffusing in the bedroom. Sometimes I use a single oil, and sometimes I blend them. It’s fun to come up with different, delicious smelling blends, and it also helps me to learn more about properties of essential oils. Try ylang-ylang and tangerine. Mmmmm!

KRIS!
This COULD NOT have come at a more perfect time for me. I’ve always been a good sleeper. 8 hours. ALWAYS. Then this year there were a lot of shifts in my life. Nothing terribly dramatic, but enough to shake me a bit, and leave me a little lost on where to start rebuilding. I don’t know why, but some part of me decided that less sleep was the answer.
WRONG.
It’s been about eight months since I’ve had consistent good nights of sleep, and it has taken its tole. Finally, just this week, I said, “I must start sleeping again. I. Must.” And that night I slept for ten hours, haha.
Definitely making adjustments to make sleep a priority again. And I’m excited to use these tips now too!

I have been doing my 3 steps of gratitude every know and then, but tnx for the reminder to start doing them again! It just makes me so happy, and some days there is just so much good happening, that 3 just isn’t enough 😀

I also must say I love Wayne Dyers way of starting the day – before you do anything, do not get up, do not put your feet on the floor, just start the day with one big THANK YOU! You have slept in a bed, with roof over your head, you have a body that keeps you breathing even when you sleeping, there is just so much to be grateful for before you start your day!

Earlier this summer I started taking tai chi and qi gong classes on the advice of my (functional medicine) doctor. Turns out my tests, among other issues, revealed that I have very high cortisol levels especially at night.

Since learning how to do these slow moving, conscious breathing, mind/body centering exercises I’ve noticed a marked difference in the quality of my sleep. Deeper and more restful. I’m dreaming more than I ever remembered doing so. I usually practice in the morning hours. And find that I am much more conscious of relaxing and taking calming breathes while I fall asleep at night.

Funny how my perceptions of what I initially thought would be a bogus airy-fairy remedy has actually benefited me in many ways. A good lesson in reminding me to be open to the possibilities of healing.

I love how you share yourself i.e. why and how these practices work for you. Having an overactive thyroid I identify with trying to sleep “amped up” and popping awake after a few hours sleep although I don’t drink wine. I found that your recommendation to eat raspberries seems to help me sleep better. Thank you! And thank you for sharing your personal stories. I love you.

three wins: 1- took my daughter kayaking several times this summer and on bike trails, no training wheels! i’m hoping to foster a healthy love of the outdoors. 2-empowered my daughter to start doing things herself. 3-my new job since december 2014. it requires me to find something positive with every item i touch. a super win there!

My win this summer was a hosting a woman’s Renew You Retreat. We had it at a local farm house and art barn that is part of a local non-profit organization offering creative exploration and growth to artists of all kinds through artist residencies, community outreach, education, events and a keen eye on where sustainability. We had a yoga class, meditation, reflexology, manis, massage, vision board class, soul journaling, organic foods, bonfire, drum circle. It was such an amazing experience for all!

Love love love all of it! While I must admit that the whole technology beforbed is still an issue (I am writing this at 10:30pm), I like to unwind with the a cup of hot tea before bed to warm me up. Once in bed, I like to spray some calming room spray made with essential oils, slather on some homemade body butter while massaging my legs as I apply. I also wash the day off my face with a gentle face toner and follow with a cooling peppermint spray (all homemade as well). It’s all so relaxing and I fall asleep right away!

I am so thankful for your sharing online. Started following you 7 yrs ago. You seem to instinctively know what I am searching for when I read your blog. Love that you give such tender advice on the simple ways of living a beautiful life. I am writing this on my iPad in bed very early in the morning when I should be sleeping but I promise it will be the last time I do this. Taking your advice on how to calmly end my day for a better nights rest. Thanks for all you do and share.

Thanks for the great tips! I just signed up for classes with IIN so this will come in very handy in my future coaching practice. I like to drink sleepytime tea and read a passage or inspirational quote from Louise Hay or Alan Cohen to put my mind at peace…works every time! 🙂

I like your ideas. I would like to add to be careful with what you eat at night. I light early dinner helps me relax and have a good night sleep. When I eat late or eat a lot, my mind doesn’t want to let go.
Thanks. I already practice some of your recommendations, but I’ll put in practice the other great ones.

Always loving your posts here in the UK Kris!
This is amazing advice and I need to listen to my own advice to others too and switch off the laptop and snuggle into bed earlier.
I use Neal’s Yard products as I’m also a consultant for them as well as my own business, and I often use their Night time Remedies to Roll aromatherapy oil before bed – it’s great to breathe in as I give thanks and prayers for my day.
Thanks for sharing, I love your site hence why you have a link from my own site 🙂

Thank you for sharing what is healing. This is exactly what I need in the time of sickness. I have so many friends and family who are there for me. But your above about good sleep and how I can take care of myself is also very helpful! Thank you Kris. Love from the Netherlands

At the beginning of the year, the beau proposed that we stare into each other’s eyes (aka eye gazing) for 4 minutes each day. Since he goes to bed and gets up earlier than I, we usually do this before he goes to sleep. It helps us feel more connected and clicks me out of my “go go go must finish this thing before bed!” mode. Most of the time I find myself yawning and feeling my sleepiness so I decide to shut things down and get ready for bed. It’s been great for our relationship and sleep!

3 wins – stuck to Crazy, Sexy, Diet for 21 days and changed my way of eating – dropped gluten completely, minimal cheese, no milk, cut way back on that glass of wine, feel fabulous –
Juice every day and enjoying the conncotions
Started my daily yoga again!