“I’ll restore you to a full head of hair of you sign the contract,” I said, trying to put as much force into my words as possible.

Steve glanced down from the illuminated mirror to the contract for a split second, and then back to the mirror. “You’re asking too much,” he says.

“More than your leeching agent and manager? More than the studio, sucking away your skill and making a thousand times off of your effort than you make? They say you’re rich, but you make but a fraction of what you earn for the studio.”

“Still, it’s too much. I don’t know what else is out there.”

“Believe me, not much. Not anything better than what I’m offering you. I’m a liar, I admit, but would I lie to you about this?”

“I don’t know,” he says. This is typical of the Hollywood sort. Actors like to pretend they’re geniuses, like the characters they so often portray, when in reality their intelligence is, on average, lower than the norm. Continue reading →