Saturday, 4 September 2010

I've set a new personal record. I've been to the cinema seven times this week. Once a day for seven days. I've seen seven films. Here are brief reviews of those films. The first one reviewed in 10 words, the second in 20, and so on (because reviewing films in 1-7 words just wasn't going to work).

Tuesday 31 August:3. The ExpendablesWhen the bullets and knives are flying, it's one of the most loudly entertaining films of the year. When they aren't, it's as formulaic as an episode of The A-Team.

Wednesday 01 September:4. Piranha 3DSome films are so bad they're good. Piranha goes further, and comes back to awful again. It's trying too hard to be a parody of the genre, and the money's gone on getting big names to phone in their performances.

Thursday 02 September:5. Avatar - Special Edition, 3DI was initially unimpressed with this in January, as it wasn’t the first time I’d seen the RealD, and I found Sam Worthington to be completely un-engaging. While I connected more this time round, it was already longer than it needed to be, so an extra nine minutes doesn’t help.

Friday 03 September:6. The Last ExorcismA slow start, a terrifically tense mid-section, and an abrupt, open-ended and frankly anticlimactic conclusion. I’d sat down thinking “yeah, but possessed people aren’t really that scary, are they?”. They’re not. She looks into the camera in a way that non-documentary filmmaking doesn’t allow. The tension doesn’t come from Nell being possessed, it comes from her being a fucking psycho.

Saturday 04 September:7. Dinner for SchmucksAs a Jay Roach directed comedy with Paul Rudd and Steve Carell, you pretty much know what you’re going to get. And you do get what you’d expect, but there’s also a lot of heart in this movie. Rudd and Carell are consistently funny, hapless and sincere in equal measure, with a great supporting cast (even Walliams). It may not be groundbreaking, but most good movies don’t need to be.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, I'm lucky enough to live close to a Cineworld, who operate the Unlimited system. £13.50 a month means I can go as much as I like. That's less than the price of two movie tickets, so it'd be daft for a movie-geek not to.

DISCLAIMERS:• ^^^ That's dry, British humour, and most likely sarcasm or facetiousness.

• This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own thoughts (at the time of writing) and not those of the people, institutions or organizations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.