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April 10, 2013 12:25AM (UTC)

Today, former "Teen Mom" star Farrah Abraham took to Twitter to deny allegations that she had "concocted" a sex tape plot -- and to call porn star James Deen a [sic] "lier." In case you've missed the kerfuffle, a recap: Word surfaced yesterday that a sex tape featuring 20-year-old Abraham was being shopped around. Then a photograph circulated of her holding hands with porn star James Deen. Meanwhile, Abraham denied the existence of such a video and then vaguely threatened legal action. She told TMZ, "If I had my own personal stuff, that's my own personal thing." Ohhkidoki.

But then Deen claimed that he had actually been hired by an unnamed porn company to film a video with Abraham. Hetold TMZ, "I think what happened is that they were going to pass it off as a 'sex tape,'" he said. But then "somebody saw us coming out of a building together ... and people asked me what's going on ... and I have this problem where I can't really lie, so I was like, 'We're making a porno!'"

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The implication, of course, is that Abraham schemed to film a professionally made scene with Deen, the most famous male porn star in the world, in order to then pass it off as a leaked homemade sex tape. But today, Abraham responded on Twitter, "You know what I've learned James Dean is a disrespectful women hater, hopefully he gets more famous like he wanted, #Pathetic #Lier." Later she added, "I'm going to ignore all the lies, all the hate, all the disrespectful people who want 2 take advantage of me, have fun making money off me" -- which sounds a whole lot like confirmation that the tape does exist.

Assuming that's true, here are the possibilities as I see them: 1) Abraham filmed a private sex tape with Deen and now it's being shopped around without her permission, 2) Abraham's sex tape scheme was exposed but she's still trying to play it off, or 3) This very public game of he-said, she-said is all part of the plan. Who knows the truth! I will say, though, that one of the involved parties stands to gain much more from such a tape -- and that's the party that doesn't film pornos all the damn time. Deen is the most prolific male porn star of our time; with no disrespect meant to his work, another video of him having sex is like another clip of a fat cat jumping into boxes -- the Internet is already chock-full of it.

This certainly isn't the first time that a semi-starlet has been rumored to be behind her own sex tape leak. Regardless of who was responsible in the cases of Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian, scandal did wonders for their careers. It seems there's an unspoken rule in our culture: As long as you're an unwitting -- or "unwitting" -- porn star (i.e., you appear embarrassed and ashamed of your sex tape), you're allowed to be more than just a porn star. You can sell your own perfume line at Walgreens and Wal-Mart. You can make $10,000 a tweet and broadcast your wedding on E! and star in Super Bowl commercials. It becomes a comeback tale. But if you make the intentional, unabashed choice to expose yourself to the world for profit, you are forever defined by it.

Over at the Cut, Maureen O'Connor uses the Abraham "scandal" as evidence that the celebrity sex tape is dead. "Celebrity smut is polarized: There are smutty selfies, and there is professionally produced porn. The middle ground — the two-person amateur at-home video — is passé." That makes it the perfect trope for porn to adopt next! Why wait for a legitimate leak when you can have a hand in poorly scripting the whole thing?