You Are Dumb, which is not a blog, posts new columns when it can manage to in these troubled Trumpian times. It is also a Twitter feed, @youaredumb, with content in a similar vein but much shorter. For a take on what a blog by me would be like, check out OLDNERD.

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Ideal Environment

"He actually sounded presidential. You may agree or disagree with what he said, but he sounded like a president… It was a much different kind of presentation.” - Bob Schieffer, on Trump's Saudi Arabia speech.

Look. This trip is about as good as Trump's going to be at presidenting. His schedule is tightly controlled, everything he says is scripted and put up on a teleprompter, probably phonetically, And most importantly, the rules of diplomacy dictate that everyone he meets has to be nice to him and give him presents. Jared probably disabled roaming data on his tweetingphone and you know there's no fucking way Trump can turn it back on. Or connect to the free WiFi at the Riyadh Panera.

And even with that, a day after Shieffer said that, Trump appeared with Netanyahu and quieted down the room to insist he'd never used the word "Israel" with the Russians, something nobody said he did but what an idiot who gets summaries of cable news about him while listening to other cable news would think people said he did.

But every time his handlers up his dosage for a couple days to keep the size of his international incidents manageable, some TV personality thinks maybe they can fucking relax for a bit and get back into their old groove of horse races, false equivalencies, and pretending John McCain is a maverick.

We know it won't last. We know it's already not lasting. And that's without even talking about THE GIANT GLOWING ORB OF DOOM, which is technically not Trump's fault but is still fucking hilarious.

And I get it. We all want to return to a simpler time when we could ignore the President for a day without a vague sense of dread imagining what he could be doing when you're not checking Twitter. But all you're doing when you give in to your baser instincts like this is to ensure your place on the post-impeachment or post-catastrofuck supercut of all the pundits who thought Trump was about to change or pivot or learn anything ever. You don't want to be part of that supercut.