The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she knows.

— Audrey Hepburn

I like that. I believe in that. But let’s also get real.

In a culture preoccupied with youth and beauty, why has there been such an increase and acceptance in cosmetic procedures? We all want to look great as we age. And we all know that woman: She's on point from head to toe and carries herself like she means it, defying age with every step. So what's she doing?

Most of us strive to take care our skin, hair, and body, no matter how many birthday candles are on our cake. And yes, we want to have a beautiful soul, too. We especially want to have passion, and zest for life. Many of us want it all. The complete package.

I am not a fan of the term anti-aging. It is feels negative, regretful, chasing something that just doesn't exist. On the other hand, it’s never an easy decision to embrace aging whole heartedly. I’ve tried.

When I first realized I was “getting older” at 40 years of age, I had a moment. I was just getting into the groove of being “not old” and then that seemed to change overnight. I still felt really young in my mind, active and energetic with my young children, so what defined me as 40?

After a while, I realized I’d have to embrace the changes if I was to cope with older age. As we get older, we discover interesting, sometimes previously hidden, parts of ourselves. And because we no longer have the hang-ups of youth – school, college, new relationships, new careers – there is little to prevent us exploring these. It is easier, to seek out new adventures, and along the way, make new friends.

Most adults face predictable and challenging situations in later life. These situations usually involve change. Some life changes may be planned or expected (retirement) and some may come by surprise, and may be out of our control (separation and divorce, death of a loved one, disability).

When we embrace aging, we get to a stage where we throw unrealistic expectations out the window and look for situations that are suitable to our life. This doesn’t mean we drop the bar, though. I used to be a bit of a perfectionist, but I don’t want to spend an enormous amount of my energy on getting everything perfect. Instead, I want to enjoy my life with less striving to be perfect, and more focusing on the sometimes smaller gifts it brings.

As we get older, we tend to think more positively. We realize we’re not getting any younger, and want to live the best life we can in the time we have. We tend to recall positive memories and conveniently ditch the negative ones. There is no point in recounting the bad things in our past. We can’t do anything about them. Of course, this is easier said than done. But as we age, there are so many more memories to choose from, so we can choose to focus on the positive ones.

We also really get how important our work and social networks are. I’ve hit a tipping point with my networks and been lucky to enjoy all sorts of support from the relationships I’ve nurtured. I wouldn’t enjoy my work – both emotionally or financially – anywhere near as much if I hadn’t consciously developed my work and industry relationships over the years.

Age is just a number.

We can choose to embrace aging with an understanding that we have probably spent the first 40+ years in a hurry with no time, wisdom or awareness about what it all meant. My outlook now is to focus on the many positives associated with moving into a new, and very rich, phase of my life. Focusing on the people who surround me, who have supported me, the ones I love and care deeply for.

Growing older gracefully is an attitude, a mindfulness, with some simple attention to our body, our mind and our spirit. No one is going to do it for us, this is an inside job.

Here is to longevity.

LORI MITCHELL, DIGITAL PUBLISHER

Originally Published: April 9, 2018

Lori Mitchell, Digital Publisher of Healthy Living Now

+ Read Bio

Lori currently works for the Hastings and Prince Edward District School Board as Community Use of Schools Liaison.

She loves to keep busy and embark on side projects that keep her engaged with the local health and wellness community. Lori is the Digital Publisher of healthylivingnow.ca, and Producer of the annual Healthy Living EXPO.

Previously, Lori held the position of Publisher for Kingston Life Magazine and prior to that, she held the position of Director of Sales for Watershed Magazine.

Before moving back to the area, Lori held two positions in broadcasting, first as Print Producer for Alliance Atlantis and later as Agency Production Manager for CanWest Media. Directly responsible for the production of print, online and radio for as many as 21 specialty channels and Global TV, Lori oversaw in house campaigns from concept to completion for each property. Prior to transitioning into broadcasting, Lori was the Director of Marketing for Fuel Advertising, with a client portfolio including The Bay.

Lori also has nearly a decade of experience client side as a former Director of Marketing for Dylex (Fairweather), and the same position she later held at Comark (cleo). Working with senior management and advertising agencies, Lori developed, planned and implemented strategies for both brands to ensure marketing elements were synergistic to overall business objectives.

Lori now lives in Old East Hill in Belleville, where she loves being a mom to two great kids, and one beautiful Sheltie, Bella.