Saturday, June 30, 2018

If Donald Trump makes it to the end of his term, as of
today, 934 days of his presidency remain. If he is re-elected… No, I can’t
bring myself to go there.

So far, he has been president 526 days. That means
that roughly 526 times I have watched the news at the end of the day,
overwhelmed by a combination of disbelief and despair. It's not a good way to go to bed at night. I know I’m not alone.
There are many of us who wonder how we will survive 934 more days of this.

Let me say that a part of what makes this difficult
for me, personally, is the fact that I serve a congregation where we don’t all
agree about our current president. And there are people I honestly love and care
for who support him. I continue to love them, even though I strongly disagree
with them. This is the Jesus Way. We continue to love one another despite our
differences. This means that I will not shut them out of my life. But that
doesn’t change the responsibility I have to speak God’s truth. It’s my job, as
their pastor, to love them and to speak God’s truth to them. And damn, that’s
hard these days.

As I read the Scriptures, I see that God
is all about mercy and justice. And by justice, I don’t mean that in a
law-and-order kind of way. God’s justice can’t be separated from God’s mercy
and compassion. God’s justice is about leveling the playing field. Lifting the
lowly and toppling the mighty ones from their thrones. So, God’s justice has a
bias—a bias for those on the bottom. Jesus embodied that bias in his life, from
the manger to the cross. Following the Jesus Way means standing on the side of
the poor and marginalized.

For the past 40 years, I have been proclaiming the truth of the gospel
no matter who our president happened to be. But preaching the gospel is
difficult these days because when I do, people think I’m criticizing our
president. I don’t even mention his name, but their minds go there. This makes
some people cheer while others are angry with me. Can
you see why my stomach is in knots these days?

Now, my friends who are Trump supporters tell me that
this is how they felt when Obama was president. But I don’t think so. I would
compare the way they felt when Obama was president with the way I felt when
Reagan was president. It was disturbing, and I was hanging on, waiting for the
pendulum to swing, but that can’t compare to the way I’m feeling now.

If you talk to any therapist, they will tell you that the
current political climate in America is good for their business. The despair
has created a mental health crisis for many people. Some days I feel like I’m
hanging on by a thread, but I’m muddling through it.

There are things I’m finding I must do right now, so
that I can continue to function in the world where God has planted me. I have
to limit my time on social media as well as CNN and MSNBC. (You might be amused
to know that my cable package doesn’t include FOX News. It took me over a year
to discover this.) I’ve decided that somewhere between burying my head in the
sand and wallowing in 24-hour misery, I can find a place that’s healthy for me.

Instead of watching the same train wreck 100 times, I am
re-watching West Wing on Netflix. At
the end of every day I see what’s going on in the world for about 20 minutes,
and then I escape into a fantasy world where Jed Bartlet is our president.

The weird thing is that this is the third time I’ve
watched the entire season and I have never reacted to it as I am now. I have a
box of Kleenex beside me because, at the end of every episode, the tears flow.
I remember being this way with sappy shows like The Waltons and Little House
on the Prairie. In the last five minutes they manipulated my emotions. I
knew they were doing it, and I cried anyway. But never before has West Wing had this effect on me. I keep
putting myself through the tears because it’s a good cry for me. There is an
idealism about the show and a patriotism that gives me hope. It’s helping me
hold on.

I wonder how many more times I will go through an
entire season of West Wing in the
next 934 days.

About Me

Nancy is an ordained pastor of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. She serves at Ascension Lutheran Church in Towson, Maryland. Nancy grew up in Hamilton, Ohio, and then served time at Bowling Green State University, before moving on to Trinity Seminary in Columbus. Starting out in North Dakota, she then returned to Ohio and served churches there before landing in North Carolina, where she served at two different congregations in Charlotte. She was also on the bishop's staff and earned a PhD from Pitt during her spare time in the area of religion and education. She considers herself an educator who happens to be a pastor and it makes a difference in how she does ministry. She is a divorce survivor, and the mother of two artsy-fartsy children who abandoned her when they became adults. Now she shares a home with Father Guido Sarducci, her tuxedo cat.