Oct 19, 2012

I have advice to offer
And I hope it’s not too late
For anyone who finds himself
Involved in a debate

These are not the tactics
Used by those who twist and spin
But put them into practice
It’s a decent bet you’ll win

Skills I learned in High School
And see how far they’ve brought me
Built upon the lessons
That old Fr. Gerry taught me

LISTEN to the question
And answer it directly
Plain talk keeps you way ahead
Of speaking circumspectly

Wrap your words around the truth
At least try staying near it
Everybody knows a fabrication
When they hear it

Don’t let your simple statements
Metastasize like cancers
You’ll win some people over
By just giving one word answers

When your opponent mocks your plan
Here’s how you can get through it
When he says it can’t be done
You say, “Just watch me do it”

When he pooh poohs the price of gas
You say, “This much is sure
Until we all get hybrids
It’s a tax right on the poor.

When he keeps touting health care
Make this your parting shot
Massachusetts wanted it
America did not
Just be the man you know you are
That’s how a bully’s schooled
Despite how we might like to be
Not everyone is fooled.

Mar 23, 2012

As Richard Nixon said one night
You win the party on the right
And then he said, with no dissenter
You win the nation at the center

So strategists, for decade stretches
Inscribed that on their Etch-a-Sketches
And Nixon’s dictum was respected
When all the data was collected
Through all the slogans, sung or shouted
His strategy was never doubted

How can I say, without attack words
This year I think it’s all basackwards
The leader, if you get my gist
Is happy as a centrist
The challengers I’m certain seem
Just a little more extreme

But to succeed election night
You can’t just be Obama light
The nominee must pivot right

The pendulum has started swinging
And when Brunhilda’s finished singing
The country which seemed so divided
Will show which side with which they’ve sided

Mar 16, 2012

I’ve railed at least a dozen times
And written more than several rhymes
Assailing them as frauds and fools
Those bureaucrats and all their rules

Who think they can improve the nation
By writing one more regulation
Limiting our right to choose
The kind of light bulb we can use
The colors we can paint our cars
The wood we use in our guitars

I’ve watched them work and hoped that each
Would show, at last, their overreach
The moment we could all anoint
That took us past the tipping point
Beyond the self-appointed czars
And subsidized electric cars

The flaw that made the mirror crack
The last straw on the camel’s back

Despite the way their flacks have spun it
I think at last they’ve gone and done it
For thanks to some new regulation
On farms across our noble nation
Because of what the Feds have done
A father cannot teach his son

Or else he’s subject to the powers
That set the rules for wage and hours

Now, this would have been quite a blow
To Ben and Hoss and Little Joe
I’m sure they would have shown defiance
By demonstrating non-compliance

So this must be our battle cry
A motto voiced by You and I
A star to set our conscience by…
We will not comply !

Feb 17, 2012

When ere I write my poetry
I try to have a theme
But with this one
I think I’ll row
My conscious down the stream

There’s so much to provoke me
That I assure you, verily
No matter where I row my boat
I won’t have done it merrily

The payroll tax agreement
I wish they had rejected it
Because they never cut the tax
They just won’t have collected it
And when the money they didn’t get
IS all doled out and spent
Everyone will wonder where the lock box went

The president has stated
And repeated sans seccession
Th’economy’s the worst it’s been
Since the Great Depression
Perhaps when he was speaking
He wasn’t listening, …cuz
Now he says he didn’t know
How bad it really was

Our government inspectors
Those clever little foxes
They snuck a regulaton in
Accessing our lunch boxes
Now, I am law-aiding
And by no means a meanie
But no one from the government’s
Gonna look at my pannini

Oh what a week this last week was
If ere there was a week
I fear we’ve all been rowing
Down the drain or up the creek