Thursday, September 03, 2009

Ready, willing and label

Is there any limit to the number of products with a spurious connection to Australia Australian labels to make the Australian consumer proud? There's Made in Australia, Australian Made, and Product of Australia, for starters, and aren't they wonderful. I, for one, relish the opportunity to buy an expensive, shoddily-made product which may or may not have been made in Australia in order to keep Australian manufacturers in their jobs. After all, if Australians didn't do the job, the Chinese would, and nobody wants that*. And apparently they're planning to introduce another label: Grown in Australia. Because, strangely enough, products that are 'Made in Australia' might not actually be grown in Australia, and things that are Grown in Australia might not really be a product of Australia.

I'd like to suggest a new label of my own:

For too long, the wonderful contributions of the Australian labelling industry to foods, drinks, and other goods bought and sold in Australia have gone unappreciated. Who but the steadfast and courageous labellers of Australia would be able to take a chunk of cheese wrapped in a plastic packet, placed in a box, covered over with more plastic, and then - put a label on top of that? No-one, that's who. Furthermore, this label delivers a clear and unambiguous message to consumers and customers all over this wide, brown land: this product has had a little coloured thing stuck on it by your brave, Australian labellers. Isn't it time we got behind their efforts? Why, in the next year alone, we could increase the number of labels our store products currently have from three, to five, to ten, to twenty! Come on, Australians! We can do it - starting with this!