Where in the World Is Ronald McDonald?

In front of me right now are our first two contestants. Please welcome Reuben Hampton and Mark Thomas.

(APPLAUSE)

REUBEN HAMPTON: Hi, Ophira.

EISENBERG: Hello. Reuben, I have a question for you.

HAMPTON: What might that be?

EISENBERG: What is your favorite thing to order at McDonald's?

HAMPTON: Water.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Good answer, Reuben. I like the way you eat. Mark, what is your favorite thing to order?

MARK THOMAS: Absolutely nothing.

EISENBERG: Really?

THOMAS: Yes.

EISENBERG: All right, well, you're in trouble for this game then.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: No, he'll be fine. This game is called: Where in the World is Ronald McDonald? So, contestants, we're to describe special menu items that you can only find in certain regional McDonald's around the world.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: For example, if we said that Ronald was snacking on a side of a poutine before visiting the Basilica of Notre Dame in Quebec, he would be in Canada, obviously. So, you have to tell us where in the world Ronald would be. And in case you don't know, poutine is gravy, cheese curds and fries, and is the most delicious thing on the planet. Okay.

(LAUGHTER)

THOMAS: That's my favorite thing to order now.

EISENBERG: Mark, I already like you. Ronald is enjoying a McAloo Tikki Burger before visiting the Asiatic society of Mumbai. What country is he in? Enjoying a McAloo Tikki Burger.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Reuben?

HAMPTON: Saudi Arabia.

EISENBERG: Close, but no.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Mark?

THOMAS: United Arab Emirates.

EISENBERG: Interesting. You guys are very specific but incorrect.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It's a 100-percent all sacred cow beef patty. Actually, it's not that at all. I believe it's a vegetarian potato patty.

WILL HINES: That's right, yes.

EISENBERG: Anyone out there know?

(SOUNDBITE OF AUDIENCE YELLING)

EISENBERG: India is the answer. That's okay; they get harder.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Ronald is snacking on Le Croque McDo Ham and Cheese Sandwich, while gazing at the Dome of Sacre-Coeur. What city is he in?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Reuben?

HAMPTON: Paris.

EISENBERG: You are correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Ronald is chowing down on a soy marinated Bulgogi Burger before dancing Gangnam style in front of the Gangnam Finance Center. What city is he in?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Reuben?

HAMPTON: Seoul.

HINES: I feel like the intention was correct.

EISENBERG: I think the intention was correct.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Yeah, we'll take it. Seoul, Seoul. Do both of you know about the YouTube sensation Psy?

THOMAS: Oh yes.

EISENBERG: Yes. Oh, Reuben is even doing a little bit of the dance. Some people don't know of this song.

HINES: If you haven't been on YouTube in the last three months at all, then you wouldn't know what it was.

EISENBERG: You wouldn't know that it's the number one YouTube video ever.

HINES: That's right; you'd be safe.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: And if I said to you, "hey, sexy lady, what would you say?"

THOMAS: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: That is correct, for a bonus point in my mind.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Ronald is relishing the cumin in the McArabia Tagine, while standing in line for the Rabat Archeological Museum. What country is he in?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Reuben?

HAMPTON: Iran.

EISENBERG: No, I'm sorry. The Rabat Archeological Museum, neither of you have been to that? Unbelievable.

(LAUGHTER)

HINES: In our fictional universe, Ronald McDonald is way more cultured than either of you.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: If anyone knows the answer.

(SOUNDBITE OF AUDIENCE YELLING)

EISENBERG: Morocco. Ronald is eating a breakfast of McMolettes, featuring beans, Pico de Gallo and cheese, on a muffin, before hiking around the ruins of Chichen Itza. What country is he in?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Reuben?

HAMPTON: Mexico.

EISENBERG: Correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Ronald is savoring the flavor of breaded shrimp offered by the Ebi Filet-O while shopping in the Ginza District? What city is he in?

THOMAS: If it's not kosher, I can't tell you.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I understand. You would never go for the Ebi Filet-O in the Ginza District.

HINES: Well I'm wishing I had a clue ready.

THOMAS: You and me both.

EISENBERG: How are you guys feeling?

THOMAS: I'll take a rhymes with.

EISENBERG: Let's just say that you didn't get it.

(LAUGHTER)

HINES: That's our hint.

EISENBERG: Let's throw it out one more time.

(SOUNDBITE OF AUDIENCE YELLING)

EISENBERG: Tokyo is the correct answer. Ronald is devouring a Kofte Burger, complete with a parsley-sprinkled bun, before visiting the Hagia Sophia. What country is he in? Just a sigh. No? Do you want to give them a hint?

HINES: Well, you'd be in Istanbul, not Constantinople.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Mark?

THOMAS: Turkey.

EISENBERG: You are correct.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: All right, Will?

HINES: Reuben is the winner of this game.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Reuben, you have the most points. You'll be moving on to our Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show.