Chick-fil-A, Media Magic and 68 Days That Didn’t Shake the World

In L’affair
Chick-fil-A, the left’s wannabe Houdinis tried to perform the cultural equivalent
of whisking the tablecloth out from under the place settings. They told America that in
the 68 days between President Obama’s cynical “evolution” announcement on gay
marriage and Chick-fil-A President Dan Cathy’s affirmation of his Christian
views, the traditional understanding of marriage had moved beyond the pale. Whoosh!

Chicken became “Hate Chicken,” not because the guy that made
it had a heavy hand with the spices, but because the opinion he held in July
was, like, soApril.

It takes tremendous hubris to believe you can instantly
delegitimize 5,000 years of the civilization’s custom and understanding with a
cheap parlor trick. But why shouldn’t the left have hubris aplenty? They have
their lovely assistants in the media to take your eye off the trap door or the
sleight of hand. It’s a good act – well-choreographed and very professional.

Case in point: the
relationship between CNN and the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation
(GLAAD). As GLAAD’s name implies, it enforces its own speech codes
regarding what can and can’t be publicly said about gays, lesbians, etc.
(Ironically, GLAAD doesn’t bother much about its own speech. During the
Chick-fil-A episode, it repeated
the slander that some of the traditional conservative organizations the
restaurant has donated to are “hate groups,” including the Family Research Council.
Sadly, we saw actual hate in the shooting at FRC’s office in Washington, D.C.
on Aug. 15. The assailant was politically motivated and reportedly carried a
bag of Chick-fil-A.)

At any rate, CNN is a “news” organization, exactly the kind
of entity that should recoil from speech codes.

Yet CNN’s parent, TimeWarner, is a “Platinum Underwriter” of
the GLAAD Media Awards. In the last two years, GLAAD has nominated CNN
reporting five separate times for its Media Awards, and given anchor Don Lemon,
who is openly gay, an “Outstanding Citizen Award.” (Now that star anchor
Anderson Cooper has shocked the world and come out, they may be developing the
“Really Super-Dooper Outstanding Citizen Award.”) Over the last two years,
GLAAD has appeared in 41 stories on the network, and 43 times on CNN.com.
During the same time, the three broadcast networks combined mentioned GLAAD
just twice.

The International Brotherhood of Magicians has a Code of
Ethics, which first and foremost discourages anyone from revealing how tricks
are done. The Society of Professional Journalists’ has a Code of Ethics, too,
ostensibly to do the opposite and ensure transparency. But these days, it’s
kind of a charming anachronism. Among its antiquated-sounding little
commandments are these: “Avoid conflicts of interest, real or perceived.” “Remain
free of associations and activities that may compromise integrity or damage
credibility.” Very quaint, but certainly nothing an Outstanding Citizen need
bother about.

The funny thing about CNN’s “conflict of interest, real or
perceived” is how unnecessary it is. After all, the media have proved
themselves capable of advancing the gay agenda all by themselves.

Even CNN’s own Piers Morgan did it during the Chick-fil-A
kerfuffle. Morgan, whose signature trick is sawing his viewership in half every
ratings period, managed to put together a show so exquisitely timely it’s
almost a shame nobody saw it. In an interview with gay former Olympic diving
champion Greg Louganis, Morgan turned from Louganis’s struggle with HIV to
liberals’ struggle Chick-fil-A.

Louganis gave a response to warm Morgan’s elitist heart:
“Who eats that stuff? I mean really, who eats that stuff? I mean I kind of like
my arteries, you know, I like my blood flowing.”

Picking up on both the Olympic spirit and the foodie
conceits, MSNBC contributor D.L. Hughley performed the difficult “Liberal
Triple Trope” by linking Obamacare, Chick-fil-A, and Hughley’s desire to see
unhealthy conservatives: “The great thing for me is that I hope conservatives
eat Chick-fil-A every day and they’ll appreciate the ObamaCare program.” Even a
French judge would have to give Hughley a 9.5 for that.

At The Washington Post, which continues to work hard to
learn that vanishing trick so many of its newspaper peers have mastered, food
critic Tim Carman created a poll to see who would join him in a Chick-fil-A
boycott (bad idea). In the lead up to former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee’s
Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day, Carman’s colleague, columnist Dana Milbank,
multiplied the calories of a typical Chick-fil-A meal by the 100,000 RSVP’s
Huckabee’s Appreciation Facebook page had received. He fretted that “the weight
gain associated with Huckabee’s effort could be about 50,000 pounds.”

Milbank should have saved his jab at the Bible-beating
fatties until after the event because the real magic was how many appreciative
customers did show up – the weight gain probably ran into the millions. When
the Chick-fil-A feathers settled, the chain had experienced a “world record” in
sales, by some estimates. TV screens were filled with images of cars backed up
for miles to get to the drive-through, and lines of polite, happy people
stretched around the block.

So yes, it would have been something if the media had pulled
it off. But they forgot a crucial aspect of the magic trick: for it to succeed,
the audience must want to be tricked. They must be prepared to be amazed and
delighted.

Universally recognized gay marriage may or may not be
inevitable, but to radically redefine the most fundamental unit of society is
serious business. Americans understand that, and saw that in the case of
Chick-fil-A, the lefty media tried to pull a fast one. This time, Americans
were anything but willing to be tricked.

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