• (1) Ms. Ashton Barton, 33, charged with shoplifting a vibrating sex toy from a CVS pharmacy in Largo, Florida, in February, tried for police sympathy by explaining that she was in a troubled marriage. "My husband doesn't want to touch me anymore," and "I would rather do this than be unfaithful."

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(2) Neighbors of a loudly frisky couple in a Stockholm, Sweden, apartment building were so frustrated by the noise that they reached out to the country's health minister, Gabriel Wikstrom -- who took the side of the randy couple (according to a translation by Stockholm's The Local): "Sounds nice for them, I think. Good for their wellbeing and thus public health as well." [The Smoking Gun, 2-29-2016] [The Local, 3-11-2016]