Search

When I look at the people around me, not just in my life but others that I see, I think “They’ve got it made”. There are those who are married, have successful jobs or careers and children. There are those who I look at an admire or am envious about. There are those who are hardworking and appear to get nowhere and yet there are those who appear to have “celebrity” dropped into their laps for just being who they are.

There are those who I can rely on, look to support and can talk to for hours on end without feeling guilty, having a laugh or just being me. There are those who I keep at a distance and then there are people that I like to spend time with and don’t mind seeing once in a while, every few weeks or months on end.

Then there are those who I only catch a glimpse of once in a while and I see or hear a chink in the cracks of their lives:

The neglected housewife seeking adventure and new romance, the woman who had mad, passionate love affairs in her youth but finds it difficult to find a suitable playmate or soulmate in her retirement years, the gay man who seeks cheap thrills, one night stands and more but deeply wants a monogamous relationship, the elderly and disabled woman who years to be reconciled with her grown up children and grandchildren, the promiscuous gay man who leads a double life with a “Sugar Daddy”, the gay couple who have escaped the hedonism and drug scene of London and have retreated to the tranquillity of Torquay to repair a broken relationship, drug induced hostility and mental health issues, the husband and wife who have remained together for 26 years with five children despite bouts of domestic violence, a husband and wife who divorced because he felt guilty when his mother passed away. There have been others who have almost been torn apart with allegations of child abuse, or those who have converted to a religion who wish to remain faithful to their doctrine and appear to cut me out of their lives, there is one man who appears to have date after date to find his Miss Right after his original Miss Right dumped him within weeks of announcing their engagement and planning their wedding. Then there is the woman who places her addiction to gambling a priority over her domestic chores, her duties as a mother and her friendships that supported her through her times of loneliness and isolation. Another woman who needs a man in her life but when he wants a secure family unit, she rebukes him for treating her son as his own.

Then there are those who are superficial and everything in their lives appears to be “hunky dory”, glamorous and positively rosy…

And then I look at my own life and my relationship of 21 years and I think, you know what? despite all our ups and downs, trials and tribulations, foibles, flaws and his slightly fractious nature, I am grateful and safe in the knowledge that at least my relationship provides nurturing, growth and development to grow as a couple and even though we sometimes have our varying differences of opinion, hobbies and personalities, we are as One.