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How to Hold the Space for Things To Change

If we want things to change, we have to create space for it. We have to believe that this change is possible. We have to believe we deserve it. We have to change ourselves to make room for that change.

How do you see the problem?

Do you see the problem as a lack or an opportunity? I’m 83 and my body is changing. I can look at that as a lack – something that is simply going to happen, or I can see it as an opportunity to change things in my life, take more responsibility, add more movement and stretching to my day. See the difference?

If I see it as a lack, I give up, it feels hopeless. There’s no point in trying. If I see it as an opportunity, I add a few yoga moves to my day, or take my Qi Gong practice longer or make certain I get that second meditation session in.

I can ask positive questions. What do I already know how to do that’s working that I could do more of?

Begin to hold the space for the new vision to emerge

You know you want to change. You have a vague sense of the direction you want to go. The catch is we can only vision what we can think up. So we have to let go of our minds and move with our heart – our feelings and our urges. We have to quiet our mind, still our expectations and simply hold the space for things to change.

Engage in deep listening

The answers to your problem lie within you. You know what you need to do. You know what you’re willing to do. You know what urges and ideas show up. When you look for them, you’ll see signs and signals that guide you. You have to quiet your mind and listen and feel and respond.

Use your feelings to uncover your path

The most accurate barometer we have are our feelings. We KNOW when something feels aligned. We KNOW when our heart sings at an idea. As you hold the space for change to happen, notice the ideas that come up, the circumstances that present themselves; even notice the passing comment that catches your attention.

When you notice a new possibility, gently try it on for size. Does it match your values? Is it aligned with the direction you expect to go, or does it open up a whole new realm of possibilities?

Begin to articulate your vision

Go exploring. What would happen if….? What would it feel like if…? What do I already have that can be repurposed to move in this new direction? What do I need to let go? Whom do I need to let go? What kind of fellow travelers do I need to find?
Do I do this alone? Try different scenarios. Explore different combinations. Release. Add. Tweak. Use your feelings to help you choose.

Change yourself

What must you become in order to manifest the vision that you are beginning to articulate? If I’m going to change my body, I have to become more determined to add specific periods of movement to my life. I have to be willing to push my body a bit each time I exercise. I have to become more aware of exactly what my body needs in the form of food or stretching or sleep.

Willingness is a major component

You have to be willing to make room for the changes by releasing circumstances that slow you down or stand in your way. Let go. Accept. Shift. Do whatever it takes to change yourself so that you are willing to hold the space open for change.

Know your over-arching purpose

I want to sing a deeper song and help others sing their deeper song. Everything I do, say, write, publish, record has to further that purpose. My over-arching purpose becomes my measuring stick. If the project or idea does not support that over-arching purpose, than it’s not useful.

It helps me to know that I see my work in three major categories – self awareness, spiritual expansion and impactful service. As ideas appear, it helps me to see where they fit, or don’t, into this broad outline.

Hold the space for things to change

Sit in receptive stillness.
Expect and trust guidance to come.
Observe what shows up.
Identify what you are willing to do.
Notice how you feel about your options.
Articulate what that means to you.
Choose.
Take action.