the eleventh hour… in the fourth month.

There was probably three or four times this week when I thought “I should blog about this…” and now that I’ve finally found a minute (that I really shouldn’t have because I should be asleep), I cannot remember what those things were that I should tell the world. Oh, well. Guess I will just say this:
We (meaning Nigel) have been applying for countless internships for this summer. Nigel has had around 10 interviews for different companies at this point and is still waiting to hear back from someone with a job offer. It is a frustrating, patience-testing time for both of us. We would just like to know where we will be in the next month! Will we be here? Will we be somewhere else? Will we be homeless or working at Wal Mart to try to pay the bills? Who knows.
On Sundays after the kids go to bed we’ve made it a habit to read the next week’s RS/EQ lesson together and have our own little discussion. This next Sunday is a fifth Sunday, so we chose a talk from conference to listen to again, instead. Nigel chose Elder Holland’s talk “The Laborers in the Vineyard.” Sometimes it is amazing to me how the Lord can speak directly to your heart when you didn’t even expect it. I remember listening to the talk during conference and feeling like it had some good points, but it didn’t get me that excited. But on Sunday it was just what I needed as it gave me hope that we are the laborers in the 11th hour. If we keep our heads up and continue to do what we need to do, the Lord will provide for us. He always has. I keep my faith in Him, but the hope tends to fall short on occasion. This was just the boost I needed to get me back on track.
Another boost this week: Where most people get winter blues, I have found that I tend to get April/May blues. I recall last year not wanting to go outside for the whole month of May because I was having depression issues. This year has proved to be the same. I have had a difficult few weeks and the stresses from church and school and Shey’s school and my family have been, on top of everything else, weighing me down a bit. It was amazing last week as I was wallowing in self-pity when I suddenly started thinking about another sister in need and my attitude changed immediately. I know they say that happens, but it was such a 180 in such a small amount of time. It was amazing to me. It was another tender mercy I’ve seen this last week and am so grateful for.
All I’m saying is… the gospel is true. It is really the “good news” that brings us true happiness in times of doubt or confusion. The Lord is being patient with me as I grow, and I am so grateful for these moments in our lives where we can feel those little nudges that remind us that He is there, cheering us on, moving us forward… we just have to choose to pick up our feet.