And so begin the Haiku of St. Lou
Tuesday afternoon Arrival ......66 Plymouth
Furious Convertible
.....Erics old lady
Eric Darby brought the love of his life to the party. Shown here departing rather than arriving because he refused to pose for photos. The Fury containing Morris Stegasaurus was the first thing that hit me when I arrived at the hotel.

(A "wardrobe malfunction" that would have made Janet Jackson proud. This photo of the Providence Team on the Opening Stage is "pre-malfunction". There were rumors of police involvement on Day 1 at Nationals, but these were untrue. This after the open cermonies sets were falling off the stage onto bystanders. ...

Look again...The Cantab's very own resident ambulance EMT, Simone -"I love my job becuase I get to write poetry when we aren't saving lives" - Beaubien, was there to protect the audience and hold up the set (which were painted doors) during the showcase as shown hard at work here. When push comes to shove, Simone went all the way to St. Louis to save save innocent bystanders from needless lawsuits.)

Team Fishes
Wednesday Night 1No advertising
means no audience for slam
Also no judges
(this sums up one of the largest issues at the Nationals this year...)
Wednesday Night 2 Whos standing outside
Cant compete as expected
Underage poets
(yet more debacle, this was just really crummy, and speaks to the poor venue choices which included several dance clubs only for persons of legal drinking age...

Wednesday Night 3
Casino venue
Impossible to locate
So no one shows up
(more of the same.)
(Although, the few of us who did find it heard the Worceter Team Kick Butt... this is Morris Stegosaurus's Nationals' debut as "the director" of Godzilla. )

(Simone and I did a GREAT rendition of her poem "Myopia" which received a standing ovation, but what do you expect from a slam audience full of self selected nerds, at leat 3/4 of whom are wearing glasses??? I messed up one line but only Eric among the audience knew. For those of you who haven't heard it a dozen times the Haiku first and last lines are the same as "Myopia" This is look at the Nerd Slam co-host and another contestant Paulie from Denver. )

<b>Thursday, Nerd Slam 2</b>

Mario Brothers

Is like life, no going back

Why don’t nerds know Pi

(One of the guys [Ken Arkind] from Denver did this kick butt poem, I hope to get a copy of it. There was a contest to see who would actually perform so people had to answer nerdy trivia, but much to Simone's chagrin no one seemed to know additional digits of Pi.)

Thursday night 1 (no photos of this here)
Neophyte slammaster
Barn disco, chicken coop stage
No lights. Mikes suck. F**k.
(I don't usually swear in my poetry, but this called for it. We had a venue with no lighting, mikes that didn't work well, and a slammaster who didn't have a clue. Yes, it really looked like a barn, complete with the chicken wire on the stage. It was ridiculous, but not as bad as some other venues...read on...)
Thursday night 2
Dance music drowns us
demented venue owners
Violate contracts
(As I mentioned several of the venues were at dance clubs that were fully expecting to do business as usual after the slams finished... Well, since we didn't have audiences or judges for a while our events ran over time...The situation described above where the DJs just shut off the poets mikes when their dance patrons were starting to get rowdy while waiting outside, resulted in the poets having the mikes turned off before the bout was finished and they had to replay them the next day. Cops walk around with their billy clubs out in this section of town, those dancers can get REALLY rowdy apparently... )
Friday afternoon 1, Rookie Slam (photo is of rookie slam venue)
Ansel Appleton
Jimmy, Tupac, Janis, John
Rookie of the year
(This was certainly a highlight of the week, Ansel got the highest score in the Rookie Slam!! So we proclaim him Rookie of the Year!! He practiced his "Heaven as a Record Label" a few times in the hotel room for us and finally chose 4 names to repeat during one particular line, I'm not sure those are the 4, but he did great!! yay Ansel!!! Here he is in Vermont...***, Ansel, I have to find those pics for ya, hang on...)

Repeating myself (Again, I dont' usually swear in my poems, but this is just reporting the facts. The outdoor mainstage was inopportunely located next to, yes, folks, ***a day care center***. (see the little tikes on the awnings? ) And a lot of poets DO swear in their poetry and either had not been warned early enough to change their pieces or were ignoring the requests to tone it down for a family audience. The situation was ridiculous!!! It was ridiculous... until it became -->ABSURD. When the following occurred.... )

Friday Afternoon 3, Mainstage Tanka
Police, firemen, news
Helicopters sirens
Outdoor venue siege
Hydrochlroide spill
No publicity for us
(yes, the cavalry arrived! sirens... which made it hard to hear the poets... news crews... why are they there??? try to pay attention to the poets. we still weren't sure, then they blocked off the whole street, but this was a big benefit to us since the only place to watch the mainstage was from a thin strip of sidewalk, when they blocked off the street we could then watch from the street. I was getting into it and then............... the helicopters show up.....)

Friday Night 1, Haiku Demonstration Slam
Red and not red balls
Precise serious and bald
Haiku slammaster
(this entire piece is dedicated to Dan Ferri, (as seen in the center) becuase the Haiku demo slam was probably the most fun I had at NPS)
Little did he know he would be the father of
Sam R I. (see "gigs") or the Head to Head Haiku gallery for more http://samanthajane.smugmug.com/gallery/756327

(I didn't learn about this until I was on the subway to the airport, but apparently someone was on the Indy's stage by mistake with only one qualifying poem, not two. The only photo I took of a poet that night was of the woman who ultimately won! The Individual Finals was one of the highlights of the week except for the smoke, which was the main reason I didn't bother taking more photos as you can see.)

I did take a photo of this French guy Pilotlehot who talked a lot at the meeting about his international poetry thingy, I regret I don't remember his name. He was really nice to me and let me borrow his email account. He took a lot of pictures too. Anyone seen them??

(I put the wrong spelling in to get an additional syllable and to demonstrate how no one outside of New England knows how to pronounce "Woostah". Corinna Bain, did an incredible job with her moon poem at the Casino bout and she was invited to be the calibration poet at the finals. She ROCKED! Keep an eye on her, she is a rising star. And a moon.)

Saturday Night, Team Finals 1

Two black men hold up

Audience with microphones

film at eleven

(Hollywood wins again and blows the audience away with this one. ba-dump-bump.)