Dick Clark Is Human After All; Life Expectancy Drops to 204 Years

Preternaturally youthful, septagenarian megaproducer/sock-hop host Dick Clark has been diagnosed with type-2 diabetes, according to the Associated Press. Clark's known about his disease since 1994, but has kept it a secret until now.

No word on whether the portrait in Clark's attic is suddenly looking like it's been to a Botox party.

Dick Clark: I Have Diabetes [AP via CNN.com]

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