Thursday, August 7, 2008

Yes or No

I got this from my darling cousin Jacquelyn's blog, under the blogtitle "Simplemente Sí, o No."

I want to footnote the beejebus out of it.

I want to tell you stories.† I want to explain. I want to qualify.

In some cases, I want to defend myself.

But I feel the spirit of the thing is to leave some mystery. Yes or No. No stories.

[SUMMARY: I'm showing a lot of restraint and I intend to get credit for it.]

Taken a picture naked? YesMade money illegally? NoHad a one night stand? NoBeen in a fist fight? YesSlept with your best friend? YesHad sex in a public place? NoDitched work to have sex? NoSlept with a member of the same sex? YesSeen someone die? YesRan from the police? NoWoke up somewhere and not remember how you got there? NoWorn your partner's unmentionables? NoFallen asleep at work? YesUsed toys in the bedroom? YesRan a red light? YesBeen fired? YesBeen in a car accident? YesPole danced or done a striptease? YesLoved someone you shouldn't? YesSang karaoke? YesDone something you told yourself you wouldn't? YesLaughed so hard you peed your pants? NoCaught someone having sex? NoKissed a perfect stranger? YesShaved your partner? NoGiven your private parts a nickname? YesEver gone in public without underwear? YesHad sex on a roof top? NoPlayed chicken? NoMooned/flashed someone? YesDo you sleep naked? YesBlacked out from drinking? NoFelt like killing someone? NoHad sex more than 5 times in one day? YesBeen with someone because they were in a band? NoTaken 10 shots of liquor in a day? YesShot a gun? NoGone outside naked? Yes

*************Parfum Sacre (edp) - Caron

Marin says: Honestly? The first impression was "Robitussin." Very heavy alcohol and deep, black almost cherry scent. After a few seconds, it smells mostly like amber and vanilla, but with a backdrop of black licorice or cocoa.‡

And Aqua Net.

It's highly evocative of Aqua Net, not just for the kinda sweet, kinda alcohol smell of it, but because I can almost taste it, just like when there's hairspray in the air.

Oh, It's definitely too sweet for my taste. In fact, I think it just went sugar cookie about two minutes ago (that's about 45 minutes into the roll-out, for those of you scoring at home.)

Epilogue: I tried like hell to wash this stuff off. Several times. If you liked this scent, it would be an excellent investment, since even soap and water can't erase it.

The Perfumed Court says: The notes are vanilla,$ myrrh, civet, cedarwood, lemon, pepper, mace,$ cardamom, orange blossom, rose, jasmine, and rosewood. This is a comfort scent. While not as rich as the extrait, it is a lovely woody, warm perfume.

†FOOTNOTE (crossed): Of course, I've already told so many of these stories, I feel I pre-cheated the rules. I can't lie, it's a good feeling.

‡FOOTNOTE (double-crossed): Before you laugh, light black licorice isn't too far off light strains of cocoa to my nose. Sure, if they were strong enough to be easily identifiable, I might not think they smelled so much alike. There's something astringent and sweet (but not sugary) about them both.

$FOOTNOTE (on the money): Ha! Got one! And may I say, "Holy shit!" When I was reading about mace on Wikipedia, thinking it may be that alcohol/astringent thing I'm getting, I scroll down to the "essential oils" section of the entry to find it's *used in cough syrup*. Damn, I'm good. Well, mostly kinda smart-ass, but if your ass is as smart as mine, it doesn't really matter if your head and your nose can get together on this stuff.

§FOOTNOTE (swerved): There's that boys and soap thing again. Man, I got no soap at all with this one. Maybe the astringent thing reads "soap" to Hans...