The Retort

Imummimmoimoomr retort
Volume 37, Number 11 Tuesday, Nov.16, 1982
the student newspaper of
Eastern Montana College
BEN STEELS RETURNS TO
TEACHING AT EMC
Ben Steele, a nationally
recognized painter and
Professor of Art Emeritus, will
be returning to the EMC
classrooms winter quarter.
Steele, who retired from the
Eastern faculty last spring after
teaching for 23 years, is back by
"popular demand."
"The Art department is
pleased to have one of the most
popular faculty members ever
joining us for winter quarter,"
said Art department chairman
Alan Newberg.
Steele is known nation-wide
for his drawings depicting
his experiences during the
Bataan death march. He is also
known locally for his realistic
watercoloss and pen and ink
sketches.
Newberg added, "During
his many years of service at
EMC, Ben has established a
reputation as one of the finest
art teachers to be found
anywhere. This has been
recognized in many events --
such as Ben Steele Day on
November 17 (his birthday)."
Steele remains a great
favorite with his students,
which may explain his return.
For further information
concerning Steele's classes,
consult the 1982-83 class
schedule or call the Art
department at 657-2324.
Ben Steele, chairman of the Art Dept. for more
than twenty years, has returned after two
quarters retirement. One of Ben's favorite
classes is Portrait Painting, an example of
which is behind him. Photo by Alicia Pryor
► 40**•**••• •mP•••••****••**•••e4N•im••
YELLOWJACKETS & DRAMA
PREMIERE THIS WEEKEND,
BE THERE OR MISS OUT!
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
EMC'S CENTER
FOR
HANDICAPPED
KIDS MARKS
35th YEAR
70 PARKING SPOTS GO TO OFF-CAMPUS
CARS
0.*.M*3"*.,.AV W-a, rWIRIVAGE4Atet-h atid ' •••• •••••••••••:%.:.....>•••••.,
Rob Woodford
Many programs at EMC
have suffered funding cuts and
have even been eliminated
altogether in the past. One,
however, has managed to
survive and expand through
the worst of times.
For 35 years the Montana
Center for Handicapped
Children has been providing
free therapeutical assistance to
families from both Montana
and Northern Wyoming.
The center, which is located
in the Special Education
Building, educates both
parents and children by
peforming four basic services.
It is a comprehensive
diagnostic testing center, an
educational institute for the
handicapped, and a training
sight for EMC Special
Education students. The
facility also provides an
outreach program for people
outside the Billings area.
More than 300 handicapped
children are tested each year in
the program, while 30 are
currently enrolled in the
school.
The center was first housed
in the McMullen Hall
basement and served only
children with cerebral palsy.
The program was later
extended to all handicapped
persons in 1955 and moved out
of McMullen in 1972, after a
25-year stay.
Before 1955, EMC had total
control of the operations.
When it was changed to an all-handicapped
center, the school
district took control of the
educational responsibilities.
The program's opening in 1947
was undertaken by EMC, with
sponsorship from the State
Board of Health, Montana
Society for Crippled Children,
and Kiwanis Club. It was one
of the first special education
institutions in the state.
In addition to the regular
programs, the center is
currently expanding its
horizons into other areas. One
is the EAGLE Project, which
provides both parent education
and direct services for families
of the handicapped. A program
is also being initiated to
educate children with the use of
computers.
There are 35 people currently
on the center's staff and three
foster grandparents have also
been helping out. Those
involved at the center hope to
continue providing free
services for the handicapped
for another 35 years.
Brad Chase
70 cars owned by off-campus
businesses have
EMC reserved parking
stickers. Charles Lechner,
head of EMC's Security
department, explained that the
lots were surveyed and 50 to
100 spaces were usually left
vacant, south of Apsaruke
Hall. Lechner hypothesized
•
permits hasn't changed in
years." He also stated that it's
hard to determine from year to
year or even from quarter to
quarter how much parking
space will be needed. The
nature of EMC's commuter
campus is what Lechner sites as
the main reason for this
uncertainty.
that students don't like to park
in lots so distant from their
classes. The permits were sold
for $60 per year, on the
condition that there will be
excess space winter and spring
quarters. Students pay $18 per
year for reserved stickers and
$9 per year for unreserved.
Lechner said "the price of
Zentat.WkWilMt
PAGE 3: Catalog review by students
PAGE 4: The Week in Review
PAGE 5: Soap Opera Watch
PAGE 6: EMC & RMC Plays
PAGE 7: "Pirates of Penzance"
business manager
Tracy Keck
I
I
Cindy Favero
day care...
opinions/editorials The RETORT--page 2-
W FIAT 144PPN 6=1:) OUT HOZ-.
WHERz;is 11-1E TAE
FACES _,1 "o eeAxt\AE.'s HELL
ARE WE PAYING FOR
EMPTY SEATS?
0-1
METRA
Here we go again with another questionable
spending of college funds. Only this time its state
rather than student money.
Most people are probably aware that all EMC
home basketball games have been moved to Metra.
This might work well with tournaments and larger
schools, but what about the smaller schools which had
trouble bringing anyone to the EMC gym?
Since renting the Metra obviously exceeds any
cost of holding games in EMC's gym, one might
question the reasoning of the Athletic Department in
this area. Renting a facility with 11,000 seats to
accommodate approximately 2,000 people seems like a
foolish waste of money.
Perhaps the Athletic Department has trouble
finding better uses for their money.
If so, I'd be happy to suggest some.
►ETRA
C
Dear Editor,
It is unfortunate, but
probably inevitable, that the
Retort must so heavily reflect
the point of view of the younger
"traditional" student, when one
of EMC's distinguishing
characteristics and strengths as
a college is its high proportion
of older non-traditional
students. For many of these
older students. college life is an
exhausting juggling act of
photography directors
Bob Pace
Deb Coville
I
I
I
I
I
reporters
Tracie Blakeslee
Nick Campbell
Bradley Chase
Larry Croft
Shawn Elpel
Carol Ferguson
Harold Luce
Dave Perkins
Cheri Smith
Denes Smith
Rob Woodford
pw.
classes, jobs, study, and family.
Many of the non-traditional
students are heads of single-parent
families, and working
toward a college degree is a
serious effort to enable them to
provide a decent living for their
families. They do not have time
to draw nasty little editorial
cartoons for the Retort, but
"whine" is not part of their
vocabularies.
ASEMC has spent a lot
for money for activities that the
.anit r 41111M • • 1.1.• • I I •41M4 4 1 • 1 •IMM4 41i=14• • 411111k 4
editor
Cindy Favero
art director
Rod Nielson
layout
Sue Bogunovich
Mike Bertram
I
I
non-traditional student lack
time for or interest in. The
Triangle Day Care Center is,
for the ASEMC, a surprisingly
sophisticated use of funds, as it
actually fills a serious need for
many students. It can hardly be
described as "competing" (Gary
Barber's description) with local
businesses when every quality
day care center in Billings has a
waiting list.
If the Retort staff does not
understand the difference
between quality day care and
babysitting, they are not
informed enough to deal with
the issue constructively, and
should stick to their Ralphie
Roving high shcool humor.
Virginia Waples
Library Assistant
EMC Library
A lonely man...
Dear Editor,
I am a lonely man in
prison who wishes to make
friends with people on the
outside. More often than not,
most social stereotypes believe
that all convicts are stones in
the road to tranquility.
However, if you have cursed
this stone because in your
blindness you have stumbled
upon it, then you would curse a
star should your head
encounter it in the sky. But the
day will come when you will
gather stones & stars as a child
plucks valley lillies & then you
will know that these things also
are living & fragrant. For those
of you who can and will
interpret loneliness, please
write to: Maurice Henderson,
No. 143-862, P.O. Box 69,
London, Ohio, 43140-0069.
Dear Editor,
Consider the Tylenol scare.
It wouldn't be surprising to find
out that the government is
behind it. After all, who's
benefiting, most from it? The
government is. And the
government probably has
access to inspecting and
shipping the drugs. Govern-ment
members could have
poisoned the drugs before they
even got to the shelves. But
why? To stir up more govern-ment
support from the people.
"Let's scare 'em up a little
since there's an election coming
up," the government probably
thought, "Let's put a little fear
in their hearts, make them
distrust their neighbors so they
know how much they really
need us (government) to
protect them from 'demented
internal enemies of the state.'
And while we're at it, let's
poison and razor-blade the
children's halloween treats. It
will really stir up the populace
if we strike at their most
valuable possession, their
children. plus, this will even
help to get those lazy,
democrat, let-government-do-it,
liberals out to vote, the ones
who want and need govern-ment
most. We can't let those
conservative republicans take
over the land. They'll put
government back to where the
founding fathers intended it
through radical government
cutbacks. So what if we have to
scarifice a few people, they're
nothing compared to the men
we've sacrificed in war. We
can't give up our power, we've
only just begun."
It's history now. If the voting
turnout wasn't a record, at least
the democrats held the
republicans in check.
Irregardless of who the
poisoners were; government,
terrorists, or demented copy
cats, the government is the big
winner in the Tylenol scare. No
one's been arrested and held.
Government has two new
duties for upholding the
internal security of the country;
to create new regulations for
tamper-proof, over-the-counter
drugs and to ensure
that all drug manufacturers
comply. This means more
bureaucracy, more paperwork,
and more taxes to support
insatiable, unproductive
government appetite.
This is all absolutely absurd.
Drug manufacturers are forced
to comply, regardless of the
regulations, if they want to be
comptetitive and to stay in
business. This is the age of the
informed consumer. Drug
manufacturers know they have
to do something to restore
consumer faith in their
products, and they started
doing it before the regulations
were put into force. They don't
need government to tell them
what to do, the consumers tell
them through their purchasing
power, and the media tells them
through their reporting power.
Consumers will buy from those
they trust. If they don't trust
their drug manufacturers, they
will turn to other alternatives
such as natural herbs and home
remedies. We do not need their
wasteful regulation. And, what
about the candy manufacturers?
Linda Guckeen
Grabbing for more power...
■ ' • • iMM. • • iiiMM4 4MEW I • ■■■ ■mor s a features editor
Gary Anderson
photographers
Jim Green
Annette Soria
Jeff Wetch
Casey Osksa
copy editor
Tracie Blakeslee
proofreading
Roger McComas
circulation
Tom Puckett
Mr. B's 6th Grade Class
advisors
A.L. Jones
Peter Warren
Jim Healey
typographer
Kathy Cardona
The ASEMC RETORT is written and edited by students of
Eastern Montana College. Opinions expressed in the paper do
not necessarily reflect those of the editors, the college, or the
campus community.
Letters to the editor and information about campus and
community events are welcomed. All are subject to editing to
conform to the editorial policies and space requirements of the
newspaper.
The RETORT office is Iccated on the 2ndfloor of the SUB. The
phone number is 657-2194.
■MMI. INIIIIIII■ "IMM■ • .11•11... • st COM ■•••■ MEW • 101... ••■■• 41•10 ONNID ■ 411110.
CAP. MoIZTENON)
THAT --a3 KY50t. lSNiT Go ro6
To WON OUT IN 'PRE5i-RAAA)
ZE'CRO fT(N6 .
Dr.
Activities Calendar
November 16 - November 22
Wed., Nov. 17: Free Seminar:
Cross-Country Skiing for
Novice Skier
Sat., Nov 20: Backpack-camping,
Judith Mtns.
Mon., Nov. 22: Thanksgiving
Social, 11:30 - 1:00, pumpkin
bars and hot apple cider.
None of the Above: Improv
Comedy, 8 p.m., Petro
Theatre
Budweiser KING OF BEERS E
Ofeeti• R.O. •S,
neWS The RETORT —page 3
ROTC: WHAT IS IT?
Tracie Blakeslee
Most people have a distorted
view of ROTC. Throughout
high school, we branded with
the biased view that ROTC
cadets were all special
rejects—crew cut greasy hair,
thick-framed glasses, acne, and
the girls all were nicknamed
"thunder thighs." For the most
part, these stereotypes are
wrong. ROTCers are average
students who just happen to be
taking advantage of a worthy
and beneficial organization.
ROTC stands for Reserve
Officers Training Corps. The
difference between it and
joining the army is simple: the
army just asks that the person
joining be a high school
graduate. ROTC works with
the students in college to
prepare them to be officers.
Armed Forces officers are
required to be college
graduates and ROTC trains
and supports them throughout
college.
The ROTC program on
campus is sponsored by the US
Army, and captains John
Kussard and William
Mortensen are in charge. The
program is relatively new on
campus and is starting its
second year. It seems to be
having a pretty good response,
as 56 students are involved.
The students take classes in
such things as organization,
background, and history of the
army, map reading, commun-ication
techniques, counselling
and professional ethics. When
they graduate, these students
will be commissioned as
officers. The students have no
commitments to the Army until
they start theirjun iyoearr.. At
that time they are contracted-they
have a definite
commitment to the Army and
start receiving a $100 tax-free
allowance each month.
ROTC is the largest source
of military officers and is a
good investment of one's time.
Upon graduation, the student
is guaranteed a job, which in
this day and age is nothing to be
sneezed at.
whether or not they feel the
current catalog tells them what
they need to know. Woosley is
open to any suggestions for
bettering the upcoming
from students concerning catalog.
Sat. & Sun. appts. available
*
Photo by Bob Pace
SKI CLUB
I.D.'S
This is it, skiers! This is
the week to be at the EMC Ski
Club meeting! Red lodge
Mountain received another
foot of snow last week and is
planning to open around
Thanksgiving.
Ski Club members will get
their I.D. pictures taken on
Thursday, November 18, at
7:30 p.m. in the SUB ballroom,
when they show their receipt.
If dues haven't been paid
yet, see Becky Miller in the
recreation office anytime until
Thursday afternoon.
ATTENTION STUDENTS:
For those interested in
having a say in the content of
the new college catalog, there
will be a meeting to review it
November 17th at 3:00 pm in
the Memorial Conference
*
* *
* *
* *
* *
**
** * **
* *
• Complete vision and
* * eye health
* examinations.
* * • Children's vision
** • Glaucoma testing
*• • Fashion &
** eyewear
* * High Quality,
• Competitively Priced
• Conveniently Located
**
*
*
* *
**
**
**
**
**
**
Ask us about: **
our SOFT **
* * CONTACT LENS * * TRIAL PERIOD *
• Soft lenses for *
astigmatism
• gas permeable; *
semi-soft - * *
• extended wear lenses :*
* *
** *
**
Room, 2nd floor, SUB.
The new catalog will be
coming out next spring. Ken
Woosley, News Media
Director, would like feedback
STUDENT REVIEW OF THE NEW
COLLEGE CATALOG NOV.17
Billings Vision &
Contact Lens Clinic
Dennis P. Swanz Dr. Duane M. Swanz
Family Eye Care &
Contact Lenses
For information or
appointments call
652-4141
* **********************************************************
RODEO CLUB, ALIVE
AND KICKING
Are you a cowboy at heart?
One of the least known
organizations on campus is the
EMC Rodeo Club. The biggest
misconceptions about the club
is that all members must be
active in the college rodeo
circuit. Well, it's time to let the
truth be known! Everyone,
even city slickers, is welcome to
join. There are no dues, and
you don't even have to own a
horse. All that is needed is
moral support and an
appreciation of "America's
number 1 sport."
Rodeo Club is involved with
weekly meetings (times will be
posted), Miller-sponsored
activities, and the EMC Rodeo
in the spring. So, even if you're
from the heart of New York
City and the closest you've been
to cowboy life is watching
"Bonanza" on TV, feel free to
become a member of Rodeo
Club.
Friday, November 19, the
club will meet at Lucky's to
welcome new members. Bring a
friend and join the EMC
Rodeo Club.
in the Rimrock
* * Mini-Mall
80-A38
_---<..- - ___::::_ ,-2,•../------ ____.----
---!---.-:„--.----.-.--- ---._ _,------ _------ _--- ,-.-.------: ---
-----
-2.=---------- --- _-:„/"-. A •,.•.•.,01
00 oil. • ow, -r,-i-i-o. 11,
0 fit el, son ii.
-
The RETORT--page 4
DAVE HOPE Kl;"1- RICH PHIL ROBBY JOHN ELEFA TE
LIFOREN WILLIAMS EHART STEINHARDT
Harold Luce
Kansas is sounding off once
again with their latest L.P.
release, "Vinyl Confessions."
Along with their new album
is a new member of the fold.
Steve Walsh, keyboardist and
lead vocalist, has been replaced
by newcomer John Elefante.
Like Walsh, Elefante sings
all the lead vocal lines, along
with playing keyboards. It
would be fair to say that his
voice sounds very much like
Walsh's. That could be the
possible reason why he got the
job playing with the group.
Songs included in "Vinyl
Confessions" are: "Play the
Game Tonight," often heard on
the FM stations, along with
"Right Away." "Fair Ex-change,"
"Chasing Shadows,"
"Diamonds and Pearls," "Face
It," "Windows," "Borderline,"
"Play On," and "Crossfire."
A lot of Kansas's conven-tional
style is heard in "Play the
Game Tonight," "Chasing
Shadows," "Crossfire," "Right
Away," and also in the
introduction of "Face It."
"Right Away" has some fancy
lead guitar riffs at the end of the
song. That definitely is Kerry
Livgren's work. Some of the
lead guitar riffs on the album
are shared by Kerry Livgren
and Rich Williams, the other
guitarist.
In the tunes "Right Away,"
"Diamonds and Pearls," and
"Face It,"horns can be heard,
which are arranged in a very
intricate fashion. To my
knowledge, that is possibly
Kansas' first album containing
horn arrangements.
Members of the Kansas band
include Dave Hope on bass and
Kerry Livgren on keyboards
and guitars, Rich Williams is
the other guitarist playing
along with Phil Ehart on
drums, Robby Steinhardt on
violins and vocals, and of
course, John Elefante on
keyboards and vocals.
"Vinyl Confessions" is
produced by Kansas and Ken
Scott on Kirshner Records. It is
sold now at any record store in
town.
sports shorts:
If you had to pick Montana's
state animal, what would it be,
the grizzly or elk? 50,000 school
kids selected the Griz to
represent us. Smart bunch-they
know power when they see it.
There could be some good
elections coming up in ten years
or so from this generation.
Everybody give a great big
AAAAHHHH for tennis
player and weekend swellhead
Ivan Lendl. He was flying high
last summer. winning almost
every tournment. All because
of one man. Bjorn Borg. Father
Borg was taking a break, but
now he's back and last week he
creamed Lendl in the final of a
tournament. This week Lendl
bowed out of an exhibition
match in Seattle. His
opponent? (Ahem) That's
okay, Borg likes playing
Connors anyway.
NASA,
LEONID,
GRIZZLIES,
TENNIS, &
THE TUBE
Gary Anderson
NASA officials actually
believe they are going to turn a
profit within five years. The
program that has always spent,
spent and spent is going to start
carrying some paying cargo on
their space shuttle. Shuttle
Columbia's latest mission
carried a Canadian satellite
22,000 miles up and earned 18
million dollars for doing so.
Although that sum of money
only covered about seven
percent of the mission's total
cost. NA SAis optimistic about
big bucks in the future. What
are they going to do? As soon as
they run out of satellites to
launch, the Columbia will have
to find new ways to earn its
keep. I say their next big
project should be to use grocery
products up there and flash
their name on the screen. How
do you think Tang got to where
it's at? Remember the giant
selling space bars? What's next?
Can you see Pampers in space?
Or how about this slogan: "If
my teeth can stay in place up
here, then Polydent must be
good stuff."
This has not been what they
call in the business as a "slow
news week." Oh sure, the leader
of Russia died, and almost 100
soldiers lost their lives in one
blast in Israel. But I'm talking
big news here. Stuff like Steve
Garvey leaving the Dodgers.
Boy. might as well read the
local bowling scores in the
paper instead of baseball box
scores. Or how about this one.
Actor Richard Dreyfuss got
stuck in some snow. And I
don't mean Montana snow.
This was Hollywood snow,
cocaine. Maximum penalty-three
years pounding rocks in
prison. "Who's life is it
anyway," Richard? What did
you choose to watch Sunday
night? "The Blue and the Gray,"
"Superman," and "The Blue
Lagoon," all began at 7 pm on
different channels. My choice?
French 101.
That better be all for this week.
I'll see ya next week on THE
WEEK unless someone tries to
fill my eye sockets with Lendl
autographed tennis balls.
sponsored by the A.S.E.M.C. RETORT
THE SUB
Wed. & Thurs., Nov. 17 & 18 --
11 a.m. to 1 p.m.
and let your taste decide!
"PEPSI" AND PEPSI-COLA" ARE REGISTERED TRADEMARKS OF PEPSICO, INC., PURCHASE. N.Y
I
The only way
to make it.
The Coors way.
Brewed slowly and naturally, aged longer with no preservatives or additives.
Coors after Coors, it's always first beer fresh. Made for the way you really like it.
features The RETORT--page 5
The Young and the Restless-
Ashley told her father she's
working for his company, and
now she is more or less taking
over Julia's contract from Jack.
Meanwhile, Jack is interested
in Gina, who Tracy thinks is
Danny's girlfriend. Robert and
Leslie's affair was discovered
by Angela, who still doesn't
know anything about the
divorce. Mary is in the hospital
waiting for surgery and both
Patty and Paul went to see her.
Now she knows that Paul really
loves her even though he didn't
tell her what he is doing. But
Paul got Tony off his back by
telling him the same story that
has Tony mad at Pam now.
All My Children- Angie's
father forbade her to see Jessie
after she lied to him and went to
New York with the gang. Opal
got Erica to drop the lawsuit
after she found her in Kent's
apartment in New York. Nina
and Steve spent a very "hot"
evening together after they got
stuck in Palmer's house, while
Palmer was at Daisy's. Ray's
bandages were removed and he
claims he can't see, although he
can. He is currently working on
a revenge plan for the Martins
once again. The big shock of
the week was the death of Estell
after a car accident. In a
tearjerker of a scene, Benny
told her she couldn't die, to
which she replied, "I'll always
be with you."
One Life to Live- Steve is
going to find Karen, but Larry
is getting suspicious of him.
Mimi and Asa are now back
together again, but only after
Asa "agreed" to a list of
conditions, one being to never
see Delila again. Hardly, Mimi.
The gala event of the year is
Vickie and Clint'sweddingand
everyone is showing up,
including Dorian, of all people.
But one of Steve's partners put
by Larry Croft
a bomb on Clint's car since he
was getting too close to the
movie pirates. Will the
newlyweds be blown to bits?
Stay tuned...
General Hospital- Rose and
Dr. Dante spent a weekend
together in bed. Sweet Rose?
Yep, but they aren't exactly
heading towards the altar yet.
The hospital voted to indict
Luke and Scorpio, but Joe and
Jackie found Harper. He
confessed that the lying to Luke
about oil being on the land,
which will clear Luke from
suspicion. But knowing
Ramsey, he'll find another
charge to drop on Luke.
Claudia and Brian want to get
married, even though her
parents won't consent to it.
Alan informed Susan he's
going to fight for custody of
Jason even if Monica doesn't
want to. Luke and Holly spent
a few glorious hours in his hotel
room since Basil and Percy had
an errand to run. He told her he
was going to get her and her
father out of there in the very
near future. Blackie and Laura
were discovered on "The Star"
by the police, bu t were cleared
by Tiffany from the embarrass-ing
situation.
Recently, while a friend and I
were watching these "torrid"
soaps, we started to realize all
the ridiculous names that were
used. G.H. has a few floozies
like Basel, Percy, Blackie, and
Tiffany, to name a few. All My
Children has Opal, Palmer,
Daisy, and Estell, although I
won't pick on her name
anymore. Have you ever
noticed all the strange names
on One Life to Live? Seriously,
folks. Asa? Mimi? Dorian?
Delila? Maybe. But Euphemia?
and Lucinda? Sounds like
something out of an old Walt
Disney cartoon. What ever
happened to Tom, Jane, Tim,
Dick, Sally, and other
"common" names? Oh well, at
least the strange ones are a little
easier to remember. And
anymore, it's almost strange to
have a common name. (No
offense, Tom, Jane, Tim, Dick,
Sally,...)
Must have athletics pass
to get in for $1.00 and to
also receive free T-shirt!!!
Tip-Off Tourney
Pre-Game Beehives at Red Door
5-6:30 p.m. November 19 & 20
teocti4
c 1982 Adolph Coors Company Golden.Colorado 80401 • Brewer of Foe Quality Beers Since 1973
JABBERWOCKY
Sharon George is the winner of our
drawing for coffee and rolls for two at
the Grand Marketplace, and an hour
of pool at the Bunkhouse.
Congratulations, Sharon!
• •
in our jar.
Don't forget
to sign up for:
"Name that
Concession
Stand" 440 4. BUNKHOUSE
The last time to sign
up is at the movie, S. "Song of the .4.• -
Wed. 11/ 17 is popcorn
night -- seconds for
only 15e.
Don't forget to watch
for daily specials in
conjunction with the
Jabberwocky.
NEW HOURS
Mon. -Thurs. 10:30-9:00
Fri. -Sat. 10:30-8:00
Sun. 12:00-6:00
•
S
* 6 * .S..•
•
.0 .°
.. • *
CONCESSIONS
• STAND
Nov. 17-22 we are having a
drawing for an 8-10 pound
smoked turkey. Sign up!
Our drawings do not
exclude faculty, so come on
down and drop your name
X X.
SADIE HAWKLNS
DANCE
to be held at the Ramada Inn on Sunday, November 21,
1982 from 8:00 p.m. to 1:30 a.m.
Door prizes, best costumed couple, jitterbug contest
Tickets available from 10-2 in the SUB Thursday and Friday, November 18
and 19 and at the door.
for your dancing plea.u.re Rock Creek
Admission is $5.00 per couple and the
FIRST KEG IS FREE
The RETORT--page 6 - —
Grandmoter Whitta er's t ree • aug ters prepare • inner in t e new a s ow
at EMC, "Close Ties" . From left to right: Sue Ensley, Maureen Manning, and
Loralee Pust. Photo by Cheri Smith
"CLOSE TIES" PREMIERES THIS
WEEKEND: THURS, FRI, & SAT
Gary Anderson Close Ties this week. The new
EMC'S Drama Department play, by Elizabeth Diggs, has
opens the 1982-83 season with three performances,Novem-ber
18, 19, and 20 at 8:00 pm.
Directed by Dr. Victoria
Tait Coffman, Close Ties is the
story of a handsome and
assertive 84-year-old woman
who often fades in and out with
memory lapses. At a family
gathering in the old summer
house, everyone begins to
notice.
The cast includes six EMC
students and two actresses
from the community. Sue
Moss, a nurse at St. Vincent's
Hospital, portrays Josephine
Whitaker, the aging grand-mother.
Other cast members
are: Sally Hannah as
Josephine's daughter, Bess;
Gary Anderson as Watson,
Bess's husband; (their children)
Maureen Manning as Anna;
Sue Ensley as Evelyn; Loralee
Pust as Connie; and Tim
Giesler as young Thayer.
Wayde Cullinan rounds out the
cast list as Ira, Evelyn's
boyfriend.
Assistant to Dr. Coffman is
EMC student Rick Moss. The
set designer is also a student,
Bess Rogers.
This is an especially exciting
show for the Communication
Arts Department because
Close Ties is entered in the
Rocky Mountain Theatre
Festival. This is only the second
time EMC has entered a
production in the festival. The
play will be adjudicated and a
judge will gather with the
production crew and cast and
give a critique of the show. It all
comes down to a possible trip
to Washington D.C. at the
Kennedy Center for the
Performing Arts.
Tickets are $1.50 for students
and $3 for adults. They can be
obtained at the door, or at the
Communication Arts office on
the sixth floor of the LA
Building, or by calling 657-
2178.
RMC's "A FABLE" TI-11LATILIE
"singing the outrageous songs..."
Nick Campbell
And then...there was "A
Fable" presented by Rocky
Mountain College Drama,
November 3, 4, 5 and 6 at the
Billings Studio Theatre.
A Fable, by Jean Claude van
Itallie, is no Mother Goose tale.
It is a totally unique play with a
strong moral message. That
message is different in each
person's mind, appealing solely
to one's own ideals.
Directed by Neil O'Leary,
this production moves
smoothly through a series of
adventures for Kerri Bustell,
the journeyor. The journeyor is
trying to save her village, the
village of people who live by the
lake. The lake is slowly drying
up, thus the source of
employment (fishing) for the
town is dying.
Bustell has few lines, but
most of the play centers on her
prancing about. She does a
tolerable job of whatever her
character is supposed to do.
The eight-member cast does
a commendable job of singing
the outrageous songs. One
song is comprised of two
words, repeated over and over:
"and then." This play is
somewhat somewhat hard to
follow and requires after-thought
by audience members
to attempt to put each action in
perspective.
Sonda Baker moves with
jerky, crippling movements,
while portraying an afflicted
lady the journeyor meets.
Baker stares crazily, seeing and
retelling her past as the 406
year-old grandmother in
another scene.
Each cast member must
master several different
characters and reiterate all the
actions of the play in only three
minutes at the end of the play.
A wide-eyed king greets
Bustell with a challenge she
must fulfill to save her home.
William A. Taylor does an
exceptional job as the tryrant
who moodily demands Bustell
kill the beast or be killed
herself.
The beast is everything evil in
men. It is the depression which
afflicts the land and the
diseases which kill the people.
The journeyor meets a
person under a stone who is
hiding from the beast.
Bustell pleads convincingly,
but the head of Carl Hansen
doesn't comply. It only twists
around trying to overlook the
problem.
Mel G. Moser develops the
character of the hermit
laudably. Moser's crippled
walk and aged speech really
brings his character to life.
Emotion hits the audience
while Moser relates how he left
his beautiful wife and children
for a lonely life in the woods.
Andy Lamdm, Shanna
Sullivan, and Craig Trushenski
are commendable in their
portrayals of a hanging person,
a ghost, and a fugitive,
respectively. The journeyor
confronts each and they utterly
confuse her in her quest to
destroy all that is evil.
An exceptional ensemble
and production staff make this
entertaining and soul-searching.
2 ,
UJ
P
T-SHIRTS
OVER 1000 TRANSFERS TO CHOOSE FROM
TRANSERS "FREE" WITH A PURCHASE
OF A T—SHIRT
MANY STYLES of T's for Om ENTIRE FAMILY
Silk Screening on Caps & Shirts for Business it Team Sports
SATIN Sr WINTER TEAM SPORTS COATS
2714 3rd Ave N. Downtown Billings Mt 259-1152
—X
2nd AVE N
SHERATON
3rd AVE N
1st AVE N
EVEN STRAIGHT A'S CAN'T
HELP IF YOU FLUNK TUITION.
Today, the toughest thing about going
to college is finding the money to pay for it.
But Army ROTC can help — two
ways!
First, you can apply for an Army
ROTC scholarship. It covers tuition,
books, and supplies, and pays you
up to $1,000 each school year it's
in effect.
But even if you're not a
scholarship recipient, ,v))
ROTC can still aelp
with financial assis-tance—
up to $1,000
a year for your
last two years in
the program.
For more
information,
contact your
Professor of
Military Science.
ARMY ROTC.
BE ALLYOU CAN BE
••••
The RETORT--page 7 11--1E-AT ..•.•.•...
"THE PIRATES OF
PENZANCE" IN REVIEW
Nick Campbell
Avast there maties, Der
Schwartzwald is harboring
Gilbert and Sullivan's musical
comedy, Pirates of Penzance.
This delightful operetta,
satire of opera, guarantees a
superb time for all ages. The
cast and production staff have
given this play just the right
amount of pizazz to make it a
hit.
Skip Lundby does a smart
job of clipping this production
down, making it quick and easy
to follow. Directing is no
simple job, but Lundby has
proven his expertise in previous
plays and especially in Pirates.
Lundby has a well-chosen
cast to work with and so cannot
grab all the glory. Russ
Creaser, master of vocals, has
developed each cast member's
voice to fit their parts like a
glove. The songs are complex
and difficult to sing, but
Creaser eases each cast member
through with the proficiency he
is well known for.
The orchestra is, at times,
guilty of drowning out the
singers. A quieter musical
background in certain parts
will allow the softer voices to
emerge.
Christene Meyers touches
the ivory keys a little too hard,
at times, and thus drowns out
the other instruments. She
shows her musical knowledge
during intermission by playing
numerous songs from memory.
Pirates of Penzance is nearly
one hundred years old. It was
designed to poke fun at opera.
The plot follows a twenty-one
year old pirate apprentice, held
to pirate duties because of his
indenture as a slave. Frederick,
played dutifully by Steve
Skaalure, decides to leave the
sea-faring life of the pirates
when his indenture runs out.
Pat Schindele, who captured
the audience as Lancelot in last
year's BST's "Camelot", is the
handsome Pirate King.
Schindele has that charisma on
stage which draws all attention
towards him.
He is supported by his crew
Dave Kinnard, Ken Pierce,
John Kuehn, and Rick Cowen.
These fellows really look and
sound like pirates except for
one thing. They're suckers for
any victim, exclaiming that he
or she is an orphan. Needless to
say, their success in robbing
and pillaging is zero because
every victim uses the orphan
excuse.
Julie Pierce is Ruth, the aged
pirate maiden. She is sent with
Frederick, who is naive and
believes Ruth when she
explains that she is the most
beautiful gal in the land.
When Frederick sees how
beautiful Lisa Lombardy,
Kathy Cherne, Patricia Wilder,
Carrie Brinkman, and Sarah
McNamara are carousing on
the beach, he dumps old
Ruthie.
These girls are the daughters
of Major-General Stanley.
Frederick tries his affections on
them and is successful in
capturing Mabel, portrayed by
Lombardy. Mabel sweeps
Frederick off his feet.
Lombardy's singing shakes the
chandeliers.
Major-General Stanley is
profoundly created by Bruce
Meyers. Meyers masters "I Am
the Very Model of a Modern
Major-General," a difficult
tongue-twisting song. He does
a convincing English accent.
Meyers is a professional and his
ability is clearly shown as the
lead in this production.
When Frederick decides to
capture the pirate friends, she
employs the police. Vint
Lavinder plays the Sergeant of
Police. Lavinder is, at times,
hard to hear. This might stem
from him being in the audience
for one song. His rolling of r's is
a classic touch. Pat Suppola,
Brad Denning, and Rick
Cowen are his cowardly
cohorts. Their rendition of
"When a Felon's Not Engaged
in His Employment," is comical
and their movements on stage
are well-rehearsed and
enjoyable.
The set is creatively painted
by Andy Schoneberg.
Costumes by Darlene Gibbons
are reminiscent of the time
period, especially on the
pirates. Bravo!
Hurry and make reserva-tions
because gossip of being
sold out has been heard. The
play runs weekends until
December 19
• ..........
sports The RETORT -- page 8
YELLOWJACKETS
START SEASON
FRIDAY AT METRA
Shawn Elpel
On November 19 and 20, the
Eastern Montana Yellow-jackets
officially open their
1982-83 basketball season, with
the annual Tip-Off Tourney.
All games will be played at the
Yellowstone Metra. The
Jackets play the second game
Friday night at 9 pm against the
Northern Montana College
Lights. The first game will
match St. Mary's College
(Minnesota) against Western
Montana College at 7 pm.
The Yellowjackets are
favored to win the tournament.
but EMC Coach Pat Douglass,
feels that the first game of the
season is always tough and it
will take a real team effort to
win.
"1 expect this tournament to
be a stiff challenge for the
Yellowjackets due to the fact
we have so many new players
on the roster," said Douglass.
Probable starters for the
Jackets are 5'9 senior Ron
Osborne and 6'3 junior
Dameron Peyton as guards; 6'5
senior Mark Monteith at
center; with 6'4 sophomore
Duane Gatson and 6'4 junior
Barry Green as forwards. The
Northern Lights, the Jackets'
Friday night opponents are
heading into the season hoping
to improve their 14-13 record
of a year ago. The Lights,
coached by Greg Franz, are
members of the Frontier
Conference, and consist of
three seniors, three juniors,
three sophomores, and four
freshmen.
Northern's success relies
partly on the play of senior
Craig Mckinney. Mckinney,
who redshirted last year
because of a pre-season injury,
hopes to be in top form.
The darkhorse of the
tournament will be the Redmen
of St. Mary's College, members
of the Minnesota Inter-collegiate
Athletic Conference
of the NA1A. The Redmen
look for new coach George
Drouches to establish a
winning tradition, after their
devastating 9-17 season a year
ago.
Guard Matt Phillips and
forward Terry Brehn, both
seniors, will lead the attack for
the Redmen. Both averaged
about ten points a game last
year.
The fourth team in the
tournament is the Western
Montana College Bulldogs,
also of the Frontier
Conference. Coached by Casey
Keltz, the Bulldogs return with
five lettermen. Unlike the other
three teams, Western will have
already played three games
before Friday night's action, an
element that could enhance
their chances of winning.
Trying to bolster their 12-13
record from last year, the
Bulldogs will be headed by the
backcourt duo of senior Jim
Stott and senior Hugh Foster.
For students needing
transportation to the Metra, a
bus will be at the Cisel Hall
parking lot at 6:15, 6:30, and
6:45 on both the 19th and 20th.
In order to ride the bus,
students must present student
IDs to the driver.
Athletic Director Woody
Hahn is confident that the bus
service will encourage more
students to attend the
tournament.
"I hope the students get
behind the team for this first
weekend of the season and
show their great support for the
Yellowjackets," stated Hahn.
Halftime entertainment
Friday night will be provided
by the Billings Senior
Majorettes and Pep band.
Saturday night will feature the
Billings West Majorettes and
Pep band.
"I also think it's important
for the community of Billings
and it's high schools to give
their support as well as the
student body," remarked
Hahn.
After the Tip—Off Tourna-ment,
Eastern's next game will
be Tuesday, November 23,
against arch rival Rocky
Mountain College at Rocky.
Game time is set for 7:30.
We're shedding light
on special phone needs.
For someone with a hearing difficulty, this phone
can shed some light on the problem. Because when it
rings, the light starts flashing. And on the inside of
the handset, there could be a volume control to
amplify the caller's voice. So even though someone
might not hear as well as other people, that person
can use the phone just as well as anyone.
And that's the whole idea behind the Mountain
Bell Telecommunications Center for Disabled Custo-mers.
Helping people with phones like this one so a
disablity won't be a barrier to phone conversation.
At the Center, we have phones and equipment
that can help with a hearing or vision disability.
Impaired speech. And limited mobility. And if we
don't already have an answer to a specific phone
need, we'll work to find one.
If you, or someone you know, could use our
special phones and services, we'd like to hear from
you. Call us, toll-free, at our Telecommunications
Center for Disabled Customers any weekday from
8:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. (The numbers are listed
below.) Or call at your convenience and leave a
recorded message. We'll get back to you the next
business day. So you'll have a phone you can use
when you want to use the phone.
Telecommunications Center for Disabled Customers
1401 Champa Street, Denver, Colorado 80202
1-800-525-3156—Voice 1-800-525-6028—TTY
\\\ For the way you live.
Mountain Bell
One of the Missing Links running for glory
in what turned out to be a unsuccessful
offense against the Headhunters. Photo by
Robby Kallina
•
Coed team winners of the 1982 Turkey Trot (a
1-1.5 mile team race) are: from left to right, Jill
Nesset, Randy Holbrook, Annette (Nikon)
Soria, and Kirk Sloulin photo by Bob Pace
' • •.•
•
... . . ...
Mr. Boston Schnapps.
Look for Mr. Boston's two new cookbooks, the Cordial Cooking Guide and the Spirited Dessert Guide.
Available at bookstores or through Warner Books:
75 Rockefeller Plaza. Special Sales, Dept. B, New York, New York 10019
Mr. Boston Schnapps, 54. 60, and 100 proof. Produced by Mr. Boston Distiller. Owensboro. KY. Albany, GA c 1982
TUES. NOV.23
9pm-1:30am
Coors Beer
500 a Glass
$1.00 Cover Charge
Must be 19 yrs. of age
The RETORT--page 9
FLAG FOOTBALL: HEADHUNTERS
BEHEAD
MISSING LINKS
Shawn Elpel
Last Thursday, despite sub-freezing
temperatures, the
Headhunters played the
Missing Links for the Men's
Flag Football Championship..
21-6
In a defensive struggle
through most of the first half,
the Missing Links broke the ice
with 6:17 to go in the half.
When quarterback John
Grosburry hit receiver Keith
Soondso for a 40-yard
touchdown strike. The
conversion attempt failed. The
half ended with the Missing
Links holding a 6-0 advantage.
On the first play of the
second half, the Headhunters
broke back when running back
Soondso ran to the left and
romped 60 yards for a
touchdown. The two-point
conversion was successful and
the score became 8-6, in favor
of the Headhunters.
Midway through the second
half, with the Missing Links in
possession of the ball,
Headhunter Terry Tipton
intercepted and returned the
ball 50 yards for a touchdown.
One point was gained on the
conversion attempt and the
Headhunters led 15-8.
After that, the Headhunter
defense took over and strifled
any threats made by the
Missing Links.
In the waning moments of
the game, the Headhunters
scored once more to make the
final tally 21-6.
The Headhunters were
ecstatic with the victory, and
captain Randy Glover was
overjoyed.
"Our whole team played
great! They're all a great bunch
of guys and I'm looking
forward to winning it next year
with this same team," Gover
boasted.
COORS SALUTES
the Intramural Team
of the Month
HEADHUNTERS
Front Row: Greg Fawcett, Mitch Leslie, Brandy Burns, John Link,
Scott Johnson, Dave Monroy Back Row: Neil Allen, Dale Taylos,
Bill Scott, Eric Furstenberg, Terry Tipton, Randy Glover,
Les Giamona, Bart Bauer, Coby Theade, Ron Kangas
yivr4;;;;01
1%4110•Cl'OnAtke6.0*.4"-*" '
*4'4,
Made
the way the
Headhunters
really like it.
Distributed By
Coors Country
c 1982 Adolph Coors Company, Golden, Colorado 80401 • Brewer of Fine Quality Beers Since 1873
Tip-Off Tourney
Pre-Game Beehives at
Red Door, 5-6:30 p.m.
November 19 and 20
Must have athletics
pass to get in for $1.00
and to receive free t-shirt!
The RETORT--page 10—
classified
I
''')••"•)'''' )"')••••P " 1"""")•""
It -
I
I
I
I
I
\ I , ,s, e C)
O 0 \) ..4b
..., ,
,--. .
.<
10
al it e ;It <c‹<,, <:. fi," z .
z
0 .., n . ._., cdG J 4 -1) ›. z I-. 0
TYPING TYPING TYPING TYPING TYPING
TYPING TYPING TYPING TYPING TYPING
C2D -1
c
I--
4% #
' 0Z
0 "\''\ -1
2 4)*
a>-.- Clot4 ''k• 41i
I--
FOR SALE
'71 Mercury Comet - S750. Excellent gas mileage.
Rebuilt engine. new battery, new front tires. Runs
good. Call 657-2309. ask for Betty.
You can buy film for 1 cents a roll! Don't believe
me? RUSH 1.00 and a SASE. It's Guratd. Send to
FILM, 369 E. 900 So.. SLC, UT 84111
'74 Pinto, 4 cylinder, 4 speedm 3 door. AM FM
with cassette and nice speakers. 2 snow tires. Great
run-around car and only $1050 or best offer. Call
656-1728, ask for Larry.
1111.11111MMOMIONEMEN
Zenith ZT-1 Terminals with
Modems, $595.00 in Stock at 4G
COMPUTERS, 1515 Wyoming,
Missoula, 728-5454. Please call or
write for immediate information.
II MI NI El III =MIN MI MI IN
Julie - Next time you play the magician, make sure
nobody else already knows the trick. Franco.
Hey Puzzle Freak! I think you've lost your
anonymity! You blew it with your last flood of clues.
Now that I think I know who you are, would you like
to lose something else? Doc.
Sarge - Upperchin sweetheart! Look up Life! Grab
a gal and dance the night away! Is the roomie offer
still open? Watch out if so! AGD
John Lennon - Let's not "keep playing these mind
games" ... Tell me who you are. Sister C.
Fraze - Next time opportunity strikes - you must
take it! I missed you in Dakota -and there's a certain
"auctioneer" there - who will never be the same! Bull
Lucky Jack - How long can the alias Lone Ranger
live on? ... I'd think that loaded 357 mg. under your
pillow would be out of silver bullets many times
over. Clammity Jane.
Fawn - Yes. I am still kickin - tho my body's going
thru severe withdrawals. No brew for one week and
4 days!! No, I'm not proud, just dry! Fraze
Thumper - Congrats on the Cody Bull Bar win.
Your clue: Do you remember when and would you
like to do it again? Bubblegummer SS2
Bart Baby - Do you do drugs? No really, I'm serious,
do you? Really?
Owners of new stove and frig - Yahoo!!! Does this
mean there will be more cookies for me or a big hole
in the pocket for you? Probably the latter. Middle
one.
Doc Dearest - I've heard you're "den of iniquity" is a
great place to monkey around. Does the red light
mean that it is available? Will it be tonight? Puzzle
freak
Brad - I hear you're pistons have been acting up
lately - maybe you need a tube job. Nice U-jOints.
A. J. Foyt
Kathy - Are you still alive? Did you transfer to
UCLA? Do your professors know where you are?
Did you become an Artesian? I miss my Little
Buddy!! Love. Lot 238
BJC - You are the only person that took last week's
classified the wrong way. Get your mind out of the .
gutter and be nice. or I'll set you up with Big Betty!
DK P
Marquito - Hey dude, psst...lf I told you you have a
good bod would you hold it against me? Okay, so I
lied, but what the hey, your mother loves you. right?
Anyone seen my water balloon? Trix
"Campaign" - I think it's about time we had it out -
on the basketball court! I could easily smoke you in
a game of "round-the -world!" Girl with SMALL
feet.
Heil, Heit - When do you want to get wild-n-crazy
and go over to Jim and Sue's again? I'm waiting with
baited breath for your reply. Frogger
etc. The RETORT--page 11
HELP WANTED
AMBITIOUS COUPLE
needing more income?
Unusual opportunity for
good earnings. Work
together. Part-time at
EMC! Send resume to:
ADEA
Attention: Ed
1024 S. Avenue West
Missoula, MT 59801
PERSONALS
DJ - I'm really glad you can make it to Montana.
Now you can see what a super place it is and what a
great college EMC is. I hope you enjoy the weekend
and I'll see ya soon! Love ya lots, Frogger-Doo
Hi Dee - That's all, just "hi". nothing more. I just
wanted to brighten your day with a ray of sunshine.
(I know, I know, it's getting a little deep in here.
someone grab a shovel). Have a good day and
SMILE. Trac
D.F. & Fraze - Silver bullits give me indigestion.
Why don't you give up? I always prefer a tall .
blonde! Wino
Girl with 4 days until C.H. - What a guy C.H. must
be! I mean, sending a picture of the prison and all!
You sure have a knack for picking winners. Mind if I
say, "Oh, hi. Were you gone?" Friend of the Gluteus
Maximus person.
Major Beans: If you think that was thoughtful,
think again! Cow chips
Fonna - Thanks so much, for the thanks - for the
thanks! you are such a thankful thanker that I must
thankyou for your thankfulness!! (Whew!) Bull
WB - Sure hope you forgave me for Friday nite. I
know I'm a nice oinker a lot of the time, but I'm a fun
person if it's fun you're seeking! Do you feel better
now?
Jim - I want you to know you are still my buddy and
if you ever need someone to talk to, laugh at, or
rondo with, I'm here. Love, Ugly shoes. P.S. Will
you still demagnetize me someday?
Has anyone ever noticed that Janie Frickie sounds
just like Jeannie Pruett? Just when you thought it
was safe to listen to country music.
Fraze - I think if Waylon and Willie were 20 years
younger and lived in Montana, they would have
found us a long time ago and be in love with us.
Fonna.
Lisa - Next time you want to play sink it drink it
make sure you don't have to work at 8:30 p.m. Your
concerned roommate.
Mom & Dad - Thanks for the support this year. Are
you sure you're ready for me to be home for awhile?
Call soon, it's cheaper for you, than for me. Write
soon and remember I'm always in need for a few
essentials!! Love ya, Frogger-Doo
Take the RETORT challenge! Coming this week!
Doc - Burgers under the arches this weekend? No. 47
Chairperson - how the heck are ya! Haven't seen ya
in quite a while. If you see your twin, tell 'ern hello!
Doc
Fraze - My tooth ache is all gone now - but my love
for those w-patches still lingers. (No more do I
wonder why my Dad has false teeth!) Bull
Snuff Queen - I admire you, you should've hit that lil
tart at the Door. you've got real control. chick!
1
I said it last year and I'll say it again. All of you
people who write classified ads are just big-headed
egotistical jerks who want to see their names in print.
Signed. Donna (that's d-o-n-n-a)
attention Rodeo Club - Fire up for the wild party: on
Friday! Newcomers welcome! It will be a beer-drinkin',
hat-stealin', snot-flingin', gutter-crawlin'
drunk! Not to mention afun time! Bull, Fraze, &
Fonna
Franco - Don't ever smash popcorn into my face
again. First stew on my foot, now this. Where is it
going to end ? Barker
Wanted - Any eligible man for desperate roommate.
Contact C at 2509. Roommate says over 100 served!'
Spaceman - How's the b.h. factor?
Guy with before Nautilis body - Good luck, but I
don't see any difference. Or is your definition of
exercise "lifting those mugs of beer to your mouth?"
Think about it. Girl with A- on crummy paintings.
Mick - Your obsession isn't that bad. The Skin
Jera - Watch out the next time you decide to do way
with Garfield's nine lives! It won't only be Schultzy's
and Lion's. but maybe you. Beware!!! You'd better
sleep with one eye open. Yourobscene roomie!
Bull - Peace, love, sex, drugs, rock-n-roll. No. 47
Lot 238 - Have you asked Shagman yet? Please fill
me in on all the gory details. Stewtosser.
Fonna - You think you are different, to this
' disagree. For it's born in your heart to be just like
me! Your love for the land and my kind of life - will
someday make you a RANCHER'S WIFE! Bull
What is the RETORT challenge? See last page this
issue for details!
Money! Wanted- men-size and shape irrelevant,
ages and habits irrelelvant. Helpful requirements:
only heir to infinite wealth; 20-98 years old; and 6'-7'
tall, 2'-3' wide.
To one who has an admirable regard for life and
people in general - I sure hope our paths will cross
again. Take care. I miss you. Young friend
Sloan - LOOKING GOOD!!! WBA
Good luck, Yellowjackets, in the Tip-Off Tourney!!!
Knock 'em dead!!! RETORT staff.
Bull - Thanx for comin' over, the c.c. cookies are
good! Hope you didn't Q. in class, you asso!
Fraze and Fonna - If you two son't start attending
Espanol, the class is going to think you're passed out
by 7:00. Franco
RETORT CHALLENGE! NOW!!!
Bull - You and Fraze are so lucky to be real
cowhands. I only pretend and dream alot. But
thanks for not caring that I do. You guys can play
city-slicker sometime. except I'm afraid I can't even
show you how to do that very well. I just don't know
where I belong sometimes, but I hope you
understand anyway. The Urban Cowgirl
Fraze - Please refrain from yelling "chipew, chipew"
and shooting the Spanish teacher during class.
You're really starting to go off the deep end. Yer
Sidekick
Noah - How much longer until we see the night life
again? Maybe at X-mas, who knows when you'll be
here again. Franc
Due to a larger-than-expected crowd, THE L
"GROW MARIJUANA ON THE CAMPSU
LAWN ACTION COMMITTEE" has decided to
relocate to the Metra for this one time only. Don't
let anyone irresponsible in on the secret. Charlie and
Alejandro.
If you see Robby Rec, say HI! He is a good guy,
after all. "HI, ROBBY!'
Jerry W. is a gorgeous hunk of masculinity and
could eat crackers in our bed anytime. Signed, Four
girls who wouldn't kick him out.
Dear Doc - Long time no write! Were you still sick
from that airplane glue? Oh, well. Looking forward
to out next bottle of Cella and game of
backgammon. Same rules, ok. Love ya, C.
Chimney sweep -just wanted to say thanks and keep
up the great job you are doing! But take some time
off to eat, sleep, and etc.! Concerned elder.
MISCELLANEOUS
Will type term papers - experienced. You make it
legible and I'll type it. Call Renee 248-4296/ 652-
5757.
Christmas Shopping?
We have over 1000 ideas for
everyone on your Yuletide list.
Send $5.00 for your Christmas idea
list to: JH VANCE
369 E 900 So
SLC, UT 84111
11111310 by -cc
RAMPIIGE
Bier by
a01t 1110 GOO Melted
Doer
Tues. Nov.23 9pm-1:30am
Dollar at the door TURKEY
STOM
AYE SENOR
HAVE YOU HEARD
MAKE YaRaNN
TACOS RAZ CtAX
$Z -
TI.EYAI,.30 NAVE
SPECIAL- PRICES
ON M EX leiltP4
CER-VAZA. FRErry
Goof) PEAL.. E
,SENOR
(--SOUNDS LIKE A Ga20 LLaC 7e)
El/b-AZY Wa:WESPAY NW-AYE
56-A/7 ,9/2. c .Z26147—
Pet'52WZZA gE5 TA Ve4A/T}'
. N. 2.5 4.441> MONTANA AVE.
VOLUNTEERS NEEDED
GIRLS' STATE HIGH SCHOOL
BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT
DECEMBER 2-4, 1982
APPLY AT REC. ACTIVITIES OFFICE
SUB 245 657-2881
I
I
I
I
I
1

Click tabs to swap between content that is broken into logical sections.

These materials are primarly for scholarly and personal research. Their production is governed by the fair use clause of the copyright act. Prior to any commerical use written permission must be obtained from the MSU Billings Special Collections.

Imummimmoimoomr retort
Volume 37, Number 11 Tuesday, Nov.16, 1982
the student newspaper of
Eastern Montana College
BEN STEELS RETURNS TO
TEACHING AT EMC
Ben Steele, a nationally
recognized painter and
Professor of Art Emeritus, will
be returning to the EMC
classrooms winter quarter.
Steele, who retired from the
Eastern faculty last spring after
teaching for 23 years, is back by
"popular demand."
"The Art department is
pleased to have one of the most
popular faculty members ever
joining us for winter quarter"
said Art department chairman
Alan Newberg.
Steele is known nation-wide
for his drawings depicting
his experiences during the
Bataan death march. He is also
known locally for his realistic
watercoloss and pen and ink
sketches.
Newberg added, "During
his many years of service at
EMC, Ben has established a
reputation as one of the finest
art teachers to be found
anywhere. This has been
recognized in many events --
such as Ben Steele Day on
November 17 (his birthday)."
Steele remains a great
favorite with his students,
which may explain his return.
For further information
concerning Steele's classes,
consult the 1982-83 class
schedule or call the Art
department at 657-2324.
Ben Steele, chairman of the Art Dept. for more
than twenty years, has returned after two
quarters retirement. One of Ben's favorite
classes is Portrait Painting, an example of
which is behind him. Photo by Alicia Pryor
► 40**•**••• •mP•••••****••**•••e4N•im••
YELLOWJACKETS & DRAMA
PREMIERE THIS WEEKEND,
BE THERE OR MISS OUT!
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
EMC'S CENTER
FOR
HANDICAPPED
KIDS MARKS
35th YEAR
70 PARKING SPOTS GO TO OFF-CAMPUS
CARS
0.*.M*3"*.,.AV W-a, rWIRIVAGE4Atet-h atid ' •••• •••••••••••:%.:.....>•••••.,
Rob Woodford
Many programs at EMC
have suffered funding cuts and
have even been eliminated
altogether in the past. One,
however, has managed to
survive and expand through
the worst of times.
For 35 years the Montana
Center for Handicapped
Children has been providing
free therapeutical assistance to
families from both Montana
and Northern Wyoming.
The center, which is located
in the Special Education
Building, educates both
parents and children by
peforming four basic services.
It is a comprehensive
diagnostic testing center, an
educational institute for the
handicapped, and a training
sight for EMC Special
Education students. The
facility also provides an
outreach program for people
outside the Billings area.
More than 300 handicapped
children are tested each year in
the program, while 30 are
currently enrolled in the
school.
The center was first housed
in the McMullen Hall
basement and served only
children with cerebral palsy.
The program was later
extended to all handicapped
persons in 1955 and moved out
of McMullen in 1972, after a
25-year stay.
Before 1955, EMC had total
control of the operations.
When it was changed to an all-handicapped
center, the school
district took control of the
educational responsibilities.
The program's opening in 1947
was undertaken by EMC, with
sponsorship from the State
Board of Health, Montana
Society for Crippled Children,
and Kiwanis Club. It was one
of the first special education
institutions in the state.
In addition to the regular
programs, the center is
currently expanding its
horizons into other areas. One
is the EAGLE Project, which
provides both parent education
and direct services for families
of the handicapped. A program
is also being initiated to
educate children with the use of
computers.
There are 35 people currently
on the center's staff and three
foster grandparents have also
been helping out. Those
involved at the center hope to
continue providing free
services for the handicapped
for another 35 years.
Brad Chase
70 cars owned by off-campus
businesses have
EMC reserved parking
stickers. Charles Lechner,
head of EMC's Security
department, explained that the
lots were surveyed and 50 to
100 spaces were usually left
vacant, south of Apsaruke
Hall. Lechner hypothesized
•
permits hasn't changed in
years." He also stated that it's
hard to determine from year to
year or even from quarter to
quarter how much parking
space will be needed. The
nature of EMC's commuter
campus is what Lechner sites as
the main reason for this
uncertainty.
that students don't like to park
in lots so distant from their
classes. The permits were sold
for $60 per year, on the
condition that there will be
excess space winter and spring
quarters. Students pay $18 per
year for reserved stickers and
$9 per year for unreserved.
Lechner said "the price of
Zentat.WkWilMt
PAGE 3: Catalog review by students
PAGE 4: The Week in Review
PAGE 5: Soap Opera Watch
PAGE 6: EMC & RMC Plays
PAGE 7: "Pirates of Penzance"
business manager
Tracy Keck
I
I
Cindy Favero
day care...
opinions/editorials The RETORT--page 2-
W FIAT 144PPN 6=1:) OUT HOZ-.
WHERz;is 11-1E TAE
FACES _,1 "o eeAxt\AE.'s HELL
ARE WE PAYING FOR
EMPTY SEATS?
0-1
METRA
Here we go again with another questionable
spending of college funds. Only this time its state
rather than student money.
Most people are probably aware that all EMC
home basketball games have been moved to Metra.
This might work well with tournaments and larger
schools, but what about the smaller schools which had
trouble bringing anyone to the EMC gym?
Since renting the Metra obviously exceeds any
cost of holding games in EMC's gym, one might
question the reasoning of the Athletic Department in
this area. Renting a facility with 11,000 seats to
accommodate approximately 2,000 people seems like a
foolish waste of money.
Perhaps the Athletic Department has trouble
finding better uses for their money.
If so, I'd be happy to suggest some.
►ETRA
C
Dear Editor,
It is unfortunate, but
probably inevitable, that the
Retort must so heavily reflect
the point of view of the younger
"traditional" student, when one
of EMC's distinguishing
characteristics and strengths as
a college is its high proportion
of older non-traditional
students. For many of these
older students. college life is an
exhausting juggling act of
photography directors
Bob Pace
Deb Coville
I
I
I
I
I
reporters
Tracie Blakeslee
Nick Campbell
Bradley Chase
Larry Croft
Shawn Elpel
Carol Ferguson
Harold Luce
Dave Perkins
Cheri Smith
Denes Smith
Rob Woodford
pw.
classes, jobs, study, and family.
Many of the non-traditional
students are heads of single-parent
families, and working
toward a college degree is a
serious effort to enable them to
provide a decent living for their
families. They do not have time
to draw nasty little editorial
cartoons for the Retort, but
"whine" is not part of their
vocabularies.
ASEMC has spent a lot
for money for activities that the
.anit r 41111M • • 1.1.• • I I •41M4 4 1 • 1 •IMM4 41i=14• • 411111k 4
editor
Cindy Favero
art director
Rod Nielson
layout
Sue Bogunovich
Mike Bertram
I
I
non-traditional student lack
time for or interest in. The
Triangle Day Care Center is,
for the ASEMC, a surprisingly
sophisticated use of funds, as it
actually fills a serious need for
many students. It can hardly be
described as "competing" (Gary
Barber's description) with local
businesses when every quality
day care center in Billings has a
waiting list.
If the Retort staff does not
understand the difference
between quality day care and
babysitting, they are not
informed enough to deal with
the issue constructively, and
should stick to their Ralphie
Roving high shcool humor.
Virginia Waples
Library Assistant
EMC Library
A lonely man...
Dear Editor,
I am a lonely man in
prison who wishes to make
friends with people on the
outside. More often than not,
most social stereotypes believe
that all convicts are stones in
the road to tranquility.
However, if you have cursed
this stone because in your
blindness you have stumbled
upon it, then you would curse a
star should your head
encounter it in the sky. But the
day will come when you will
gather stones & stars as a child
plucks valley lillies & then you
will know that these things also
are living & fragrant. For those
of you who can and will
interpret loneliness, please
write to: Maurice Henderson,
No. 143-862, P.O. Box 69,
London, Ohio, 43140-0069.
Dear Editor,
Consider the Tylenol scare.
It wouldn't be surprising to find
out that the government is
behind it. After all, who's
benefiting, most from it? The
government is. And the
government probably has
access to inspecting and
shipping the drugs. Govern-ment
members could have
poisoned the drugs before they
even got to the shelves. But
why? To stir up more govern-ment
support from the people.
"Let's scare 'em up a little
since there's an election coming
up" the government probably
thought, "Let's put a little fear
in their hearts, make them
distrust their neighbors so they
know how much they really
need us (government) to
protect them from 'demented
internal enemies of the state.'
And while we're at it, let's
poison and razor-blade the
children's halloween treats. It
will really stir up the populace
if we strike at their most
valuable possession, their
children. plus, this will even
help to get those lazy,
democrat, let-government-do-it,
liberals out to vote, the ones
who want and need govern-ment
most. We can't let those
conservative republicans take
over the land. They'll put
government back to where the
founding fathers intended it
through radical government
cutbacks. So what if we have to
scarifice a few people, they're
nothing compared to the men
we've sacrificed in war. We
can't give up our power, we've
only just begun."
It's history now. If the voting
turnout wasn't a record, at least
the democrats held the
republicans in check.
Irregardless of who the
poisoners were; government,
terrorists, or demented copy
cats, the government is the big
winner in the Tylenol scare. No
one's been arrested and held.
Government has two new
duties for upholding the
internal security of the country;
to create new regulations for
tamper-proof, over-the-counter
drugs and to ensure
that all drug manufacturers
comply. This means more
bureaucracy, more paperwork,
and more taxes to support
insatiable, unproductive
government appetite.
This is all absolutely absurd.
Drug manufacturers are forced
to comply, regardless of the
regulations, if they want to be
comptetitive and to stay in
business. This is the age of the
informed consumer. Drug
manufacturers know they have
to do something to restore
consumer faith in their
products, and they started
doing it before the regulations
were put into force. They don't
need government to tell them
what to do, the consumers tell
them through their purchasing
power, and the media tells them
through their reporting power.
Consumers will buy from those
they trust. If they don't trust
their drug manufacturers, they
will turn to other alternatives
such as natural herbs and home
remedies. We do not need their
wasteful regulation. And, what
about the candy manufacturers?
Linda Guckeen
Grabbing for more power...
■ ' • • iMM. • • iiiMM4 4MEW I • ■■■ ■mor s a features editor
Gary Anderson
photographers
Jim Green
Annette Soria
Jeff Wetch
Casey Osksa
copy editor
Tracie Blakeslee
proofreading
Roger McComas
circulation
Tom Puckett
Mr. B's 6th Grade Class
advisors
A.L. Jones
Peter Warren
Jim Healey
typographer
Kathy Cardona
The ASEMC RETORT is written and edited by students of
Eastern Montana College. Opinions expressed in the paper do
not necessarily reflect those of the editors, the college, or the
campus community.
Letters to the editor and information about campus and
community events are welcomed. All are subject to editing to
conform to the editorial policies and space requirements of the
newspaper.
The RETORT office is Iccated on the 2ndfloor of the SUB. The
phone number is 657-2194.
■MMI. INIIIIIII■ "IMM■ • .11•11... • st COM ■•••■ MEW • 101... ••■■• 41•10 ONNID ■ 411110.
CAP. MoIZTENON)
THAT --a3 KY50t. lSNiT Go ro6
To WON OUT IN 'PRE5i-RAAA)
ZE'CRO fT(N6 .
Dr.
Activities Calendar
November 16 - November 22
Wed., Nov. 17: Free Seminar:
Cross-Country Skiing for
Novice Skier
Sat., Nov 20: Backpack-camping,
Judith Mtns.
Mon., Nov. 22: Thanksgiving
Social, 11:30 - 1:00, pumpkin
bars and hot apple cider.
None of the Above: Improv
Comedy, 8 p.m., Petro
Theatre
Budweiser KING OF BEERS E
Ofeeti• R.O. •S,
neWS The RETORT —page 3
ROTC: WHAT IS IT?
Tracie Blakeslee
Most people have a distorted
view of ROTC. Throughout
high school, we branded with
the biased view that ROTC
cadets were all special
rejects—crew cut greasy hair,
thick-framed glasses, acne, and
the girls all were nicknamed
"thunder thighs." For the most
part, these stereotypes are
wrong. ROTCers are average
students who just happen to be
taking advantage of a worthy
and beneficial organization.
ROTC stands for Reserve
Officers Training Corps. The
difference between it and
joining the army is simple: the
army just asks that the person
joining be a high school
graduate. ROTC works with
the students in college to
prepare them to be officers.
Armed Forces officers are
required to be college
graduates and ROTC trains
and supports them throughout
college.
The ROTC program on
campus is sponsored by the US
Army, and captains John
Kussard and William
Mortensen are in charge. The
program is relatively new on
campus and is starting its
second year. It seems to be
having a pretty good response,
as 56 students are involved.
The students take classes in
such things as organization,
background, and history of the
army, map reading, commun-ication
techniques, counselling
and professional ethics. When
they graduate, these students
will be commissioned as
officers. The students have no
commitments to the Army until
they start theirjun iyoearr.. At
that time they are contracted-they
have a definite
commitment to the Army and
start receiving a $100 tax-free
allowance each month.
ROTC is the largest source
of military officers and is a
good investment of one's time.
Upon graduation, the student
is guaranteed a job, which in
this day and age is nothing to be
sneezed at.
whether or not they feel the
current catalog tells them what
they need to know. Woosley is
open to any suggestions for
bettering the upcoming
from students concerning catalog.
Sat. & Sun. appts. available
*
Photo by Bob Pace
SKI CLUB
I.D.'S
This is it, skiers! This is
the week to be at the EMC Ski
Club meeting! Red lodge
Mountain received another
foot of snow last week and is
planning to open around
Thanksgiving.
Ski Club members will get
their I.D. pictures taken on
Thursday, November 18, at
7:30 p.m. in the SUB ballroom,
when they show their receipt.
If dues haven't been paid
yet, see Becky Miller in the
recreation office anytime until
Thursday afternoon.
ATTENTION STUDENTS:
For those interested in
having a say in the content of
the new college catalog, there
will be a meeting to review it
November 17th at 3:00 pm in
the Memorial Conference
*
* *
* *
* *
* *
**
** * **
* *
• Complete vision and
* * eye health
* examinations.
* * • Children's vision
** • Glaucoma testing
*• • Fashion &
** eyewear
* * High Quality,
• Competitively Priced
• Conveniently Located
**
*
*
* *
**
**
**
**
**
**
Ask us about: **
our SOFT **
* * CONTACT LENS * * TRIAL PERIOD *
• Soft lenses for *
astigmatism
• gas permeable; *
semi-soft - * *
• extended wear lenses :*
* *
** *
**
Room, 2nd floor, SUB.
The new catalog will be
coming out next spring. Ken
Woosley, News Media
Director, would like feedback
STUDENT REVIEW OF THE NEW
COLLEGE CATALOG NOV.17
Billings Vision &
Contact Lens Clinic
Dennis P. Swanz Dr. Duane M. Swanz
Family Eye Care &
Contact Lenses
For information or
appointments call
652-4141
* **********************************************************
RODEO CLUB, ALIVE
AND KICKING
Are you a cowboy at heart?
One of the least known
organizations on campus is the
EMC Rodeo Club. The biggest
misconceptions about the club
is that all members must be
active in the college rodeo
circuit. Well, it's time to let the
truth be known! Everyone,
even city slickers, is welcome to
join. There are no dues, and
you don't even have to own a
horse. All that is needed is
moral support and an
appreciation of "America's
number 1 sport."
Rodeo Club is involved with
weekly meetings (times will be
posted), Miller-sponsored
activities, and the EMC Rodeo
in the spring. So, even if you're
from the heart of New York
City and the closest you've been
to cowboy life is watching
"Bonanza" on TV, feel free to
become a member of Rodeo
Club.
Friday, November 19, the
club will meet at Lucky's to
welcome new members. Bring a
friend and join the EMC
Rodeo Club.
in the Rimrock
* * Mini-Mall
80-A38
_----.- Clot4 ''k• 41i
I--
FOR SALE
'71 Mercury Comet - S750. Excellent gas mileage.
Rebuilt engine. new battery, new front tires. Runs
good. Call 657-2309. ask for Betty.
You can buy film for 1 cents a roll! Don't believe
me? RUSH 1.00 and a SASE. It's Guratd. Send to
FILM, 369 E. 900 So.. SLC, UT 84111
'74 Pinto, 4 cylinder, 4 speedm 3 door. AM FM
with cassette and nice speakers. 2 snow tires. Great
run-around car and only $1050 or best offer. Call
656-1728, ask for Larry.
1111.11111MMOMIONEMEN
Zenith ZT-1 Terminals with
Modems, $595.00 in Stock at 4G
COMPUTERS, 1515 Wyoming,
Missoula, 728-5454. Please call or
write for immediate information.
II MI NI El III =MIN MI MI IN
Julie - Next time you play the magician, make sure
nobody else already knows the trick. Franco.
Hey Puzzle Freak! I think you've lost your
anonymity! You blew it with your last flood of clues.
Now that I think I know who you are, would you like
to lose something else? Doc.
Sarge - Upperchin sweetheart! Look up Life! Grab
a gal and dance the night away! Is the roomie offer
still open? Watch out if so! AGD
John Lennon - Let's not "keep playing these mind
games" ... Tell me who you are. Sister C.
Fraze - Next time opportunity strikes - you must
take it! I missed you in Dakota -and there's a certain
"auctioneer" there - who will never be the same! Bull
Lucky Jack - How long can the alias Lone Ranger
live on? ... I'd think that loaded 357 mg. under your
pillow would be out of silver bullets many times
over. Clammity Jane.
Fawn - Yes. I am still kickin - tho my body's going
thru severe withdrawals. No brew for one week and
4 days!! No, I'm not proud, just dry! Fraze
Thumper - Congrats on the Cody Bull Bar win.
Your clue: Do you remember when and would you
like to do it again? Bubblegummer SS2
Bart Baby - Do you do drugs? No really, I'm serious,
do you? Really?
Owners of new stove and frig - Yahoo!!! Does this
mean there will be more cookies for me or a big hole
in the pocket for you? Probably the latter. Middle
one.
Doc Dearest - I've heard you're "den of iniquity" is a
great place to monkey around. Does the red light
mean that it is available? Will it be tonight? Puzzle
freak
Brad - I hear you're pistons have been acting up
lately - maybe you need a tube job. Nice U-jOints.
A. J. Foyt
Kathy - Are you still alive? Did you transfer to
UCLA? Do your professors know where you are?
Did you become an Artesian? I miss my Little
Buddy!! Love. Lot 238
BJC - You are the only person that took last week's
classified the wrong way. Get your mind out of the .
gutter and be nice. or I'll set you up with Big Betty!
DK P
Marquito - Hey dude, psst...lf I told you you have a
good bod would you hold it against me? Okay, so I
lied, but what the hey, your mother loves you. right?
Anyone seen my water balloon? Trix
"Campaign" - I think it's about time we had it out -
on the basketball court! I could easily smoke you in
a game of "round-the -world!" Girl with SMALL
feet.
Heil, Heit - When do you want to get wild-n-crazy
and go over to Jim and Sue's again? I'm waiting with
baited breath for your reply. Frogger
etc. The RETORT--page 11
HELP WANTED
AMBITIOUS COUPLE
needing more income?
Unusual opportunity for
good earnings. Work
together. Part-time at
EMC! Send resume to:
ADEA
Attention: Ed
1024 S. Avenue West
Missoula, MT 59801
PERSONALS
DJ - I'm really glad you can make it to Montana.
Now you can see what a super place it is and what a
great college EMC is. I hope you enjoy the weekend
and I'll see ya soon! Love ya lots, Frogger-Doo
Hi Dee - That's all, just "hi". nothing more. I just
wanted to brighten your day with a ray of sunshine.
(I know, I know, it's getting a little deep in here.
someone grab a shovel). Have a good day and
SMILE. Trac
D.F. & Fraze - Silver bullits give me indigestion.
Why don't you give up? I always prefer a tall .
blonde! Wino
Girl with 4 days until C.H. - What a guy C.H. must
be! I mean, sending a picture of the prison and all!
You sure have a knack for picking winners. Mind if I
say, "Oh, hi. Were you gone?" Friend of the Gluteus
Maximus person.
Major Beans: If you think that was thoughtful,
think again! Cow chips
Fonna - Thanks so much, for the thanks - for the
thanks! you are such a thankful thanker that I must
thankyou for your thankfulness!! (Whew!) Bull
WB - Sure hope you forgave me for Friday nite. I
know I'm a nice oinker a lot of the time, but I'm a fun
person if it's fun you're seeking! Do you feel better
now?
Jim - I want you to know you are still my buddy and
if you ever need someone to talk to, laugh at, or
rondo with, I'm here. Love, Ugly shoes. P.S. Will
you still demagnetize me someday?
Has anyone ever noticed that Janie Frickie sounds
just like Jeannie Pruett? Just when you thought it
was safe to listen to country music.
Fraze - I think if Waylon and Willie were 20 years
younger and lived in Montana, they would have
found us a long time ago and be in love with us.
Fonna.
Lisa - Next time you want to play sink it drink it
make sure you don't have to work at 8:30 p.m. Your
concerned roommate.
Mom & Dad - Thanks for the support this year. Are
you sure you're ready for me to be home for awhile?
Call soon, it's cheaper for you, than for me. Write
soon and remember I'm always in need for a few
essentials!! Love ya, Frogger-Doo
Take the RETORT challenge! Coming this week!
Doc - Burgers under the arches this weekend? No. 47
Chairperson - how the heck are ya! Haven't seen ya
in quite a while. If you see your twin, tell 'ern hello!
Doc
Fraze - My tooth ache is all gone now - but my love
for those w-patches still lingers. (No more do I
wonder why my Dad has false teeth!) Bull
Snuff Queen - I admire you, you should've hit that lil
tart at the Door. you've got real control. chick!
1
I said it last year and I'll say it again. All of you
people who write classified ads are just big-headed
egotistical jerks who want to see their names in print.
Signed. Donna (that's d-o-n-n-a)
attention Rodeo Club - Fire up for the wild party: on
Friday! Newcomers welcome! It will be a beer-drinkin',
hat-stealin', snot-flingin', gutter-crawlin'
drunk! Not to mention afun time! Bull, Fraze, &
Fonna
Franco - Don't ever smash popcorn into my face
again. First stew on my foot, now this. Where is it
going to end ? Barker
Wanted - Any eligible man for desperate roommate.
Contact C at 2509. Roommate says over 100 served!'
Spaceman - How's the b.h. factor?
Guy with before Nautilis body - Good luck, but I
don't see any difference. Or is your definition of
exercise "lifting those mugs of beer to your mouth?"
Think about it. Girl with A- on crummy paintings.
Mick - Your obsession isn't that bad. The Skin
Jera - Watch out the next time you decide to do way
with Garfield's nine lives! It won't only be Schultzy's
and Lion's. but maybe you. Beware!!! You'd better
sleep with one eye open. Yourobscene roomie!
Bull - Peace, love, sex, drugs, rock-n-roll. No. 47
Lot 238 - Have you asked Shagman yet? Please fill
me in on all the gory details. Stewtosser.
Fonna - You think you are different, to this
' disagree. For it's born in your heart to be just like
me! Your love for the land and my kind of life - will
someday make you a RANCHER'S WIFE! Bull
What is the RETORT challenge? See last page this
issue for details!
Money! Wanted- men-size and shape irrelevant,
ages and habits irrelelvant. Helpful requirements:
only heir to infinite wealth; 20-98 years old; and 6'-7'
tall, 2'-3' wide.
To one who has an admirable regard for life and
people in general - I sure hope our paths will cross
again. Take care. I miss you. Young friend
Sloan - LOOKING GOOD!!! WBA
Good luck, Yellowjackets, in the Tip-Off Tourney!!!
Knock 'em dead!!! RETORT staff.
Bull - Thanx for comin' over, the c.c. cookies are
good! Hope you didn't Q. in class, you asso!
Fraze and Fonna - If you two son't start attending
Espanol, the class is going to think you're passed out
by 7:00. Franco
RETORT CHALLENGE! NOW!!!
Bull - You and Fraze are so lucky to be real
cowhands. I only pretend and dream alot. But
thanks for not caring that I do. You guys can play
city-slicker sometime. except I'm afraid I can't even
show you how to do that very well. I just don't know
where I belong sometimes, but I hope you
understand anyway. The Urban Cowgirl
Fraze - Please refrain from yelling "chipew, chipew"
and shooting the Spanish teacher during class.
You're really starting to go off the deep end. Yer
Sidekick
Noah - How much longer until we see the night life
again? Maybe at X-mas, who knows when you'll be
here again. Franc
Due to a larger-than-expected crowd, THE L
"GROW MARIJUANA ON THE CAMPSU
LAWN ACTION COMMITTEE" has decided to
relocate to the Metra for this one time only. Don't
let anyone irresponsible in on the secret. Charlie and
Alejandro.
If you see Robby Rec, say HI! He is a good guy,
after all. "HI, ROBBY!'
Jerry W. is a gorgeous hunk of masculinity and
could eat crackers in our bed anytime. Signed, Four
girls who wouldn't kick him out.
Dear Doc - Long time no write! Were you still sick
from that airplane glue? Oh, well. Looking forward
to out next bottle of Cella and game of
backgammon. Same rules, ok. Love ya, C.
Chimney sweep -just wanted to say thanks and keep
up the great job you are doing! But take some time
off to eat, sleep, and etc.! Concerned elder.
MISCELLANEOUS
Will type term papers - experienced. You make it
legible and I'll type it. Call Renee 248-4296/ 652-
5757.
Christmas Shopping?
We have over 1000 ideas for
everyone on your Yuletide list.
Send $5.00 for your Christmas idea
list to: JH VANCE
369 E 900 So
SLC, UT 84111
11111310 by -cc
RAMPIIGE
Bier by
a01t 1110 GOO Melted
Doer
Tues. Nov.23 9pm-1:30am
Dollar at the door TURKEY
STOM
AYE SENOR
HAVE YOU HEARD
MAKE YaRaNN
TACOS RAZ CtAX
$Z -
TI.EYAI,.30 NAVE
SPECIAL- PRICES
ON M EX leiltP4
CER-VAZA. FRErry
Goof) PEAL.. E
,SENOR
(--SOUNDS LIKE A Ga20 LLaC 7e)
El/b-AZY Wa:WESPAY NW-AYE
56-A/7 ,9/2. c .Z26147—
Pet'52WZZA gE5 TA Ve4A/T}'
. N. 2.5 4.441> MONTANA AVE.
VOLUNTEERS NEEDED
GIRLS' STATE HIGH SCHOOL
BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT
DECEMBER 2-4, 1982
APPLY AT REC. ACTIVITIES OFFICE
SUB 245 657-2881
I
I
I
I
I
1