How to go from stressed ... To unstressed

"Stress" is our body's normal automatic response to change in our lives. The change may be negative, positive, or imagined. When we feel unable to cope with a new demand, we begin to feel stress. Stress is highly individual - what may be very relaxing to one person may be stressful to another.

Not all stress is bad. We need a certain amount of stress in our lives because it stimulates and energizes us. At low levels, it motivates us to face challenges and achieve, and it adds excitement to our lives. Without stress, we may feel bored or depressed.

There are two main types of stress: eustress, the "good" type of stress, and distress, which is considered "bad" stress. Distress occurs when our stress level becomes too high and unmanageable.

As with body temperature, we can't function well if stress is too low or too high. Each person needs to find an optimal level of stress that is motivating but not overwhelming. Then stress will work for you instead of against you.

It's Important to Manage Stress

Recognizing stress is the first step toward reducing it. Stress can build up gradually and you may not be aware of it until it has reached a critical level. If you are experiencing stress symptoms, you have gone beyond your optimal stress level. This is a signal that you need to reduce the stress in your life and/or improve your ability to manage it. Remember, the goal is not to eliminate all stress. Your aim is to manage it, keep it at a healthy level, and prevent distress.

Key steps in stress management include:

Identify your current stressors (external, relational, internal)

Identify your current coping reactions (helpful, not helpful)

Change stressful situations and/or your reactions

Increase your positive, healthy coping reactions

How Change Can Create Stress

The "stress reaction" originally helped prehistoric humans survive dangerous situations by preparing them for "fight or flight." It consists of three phases:

Alarm - the body is aroused by a stressor and releases hormones to cope with the threat.

Resistance - the body repairs any damage done during the alarm stage and returns to normal.

Exhaustion - may occur if the stressor continues or several stressors are present; the body is chronically aroused, cannot repair itself and adapt, and the person becomes impaired. The stress reaction should typically be short-term and infrequent.

While physical threats are now less common, the fight or flight response can still be activated by any change or threat, real or imagined. If we think a situation is harmful to us, the body will overract as if it were a life or death matter.