Reflections from Parishioners

Parishioners have been asked to contribute their recollections and memories of Father Rugel in their own words. Many have responded quickly and their contributions are presented in this section. As a memorial to our beloved Founding Pastor, we plan to display these insightful observations for an extended period.

We continue to accept memorable contributions of this sort from parishioners and others who were acquainted with Father Rugel. Please direct your submittals by E-MAIL to the following mailbox:feedback@olvwayne.org

We will also accept a limited number of hard copy (paper) submittals at the Parish Office at this address:

He was here when this property was a cornfield, but he saw a Church, and he transformed that vision into a reality.

The architect had his picture of the church, but Fr. Rugel always focused on God’s vision of a Church- a family of believers, who want to come together to know, love and serve Him and each other.

Over the thirty-two years that he was our pastor, he guided us through many changes that few, if any of us would have imagined before Vatican II. He agonized over just how and when to make these changes. Is this too fast? To slow? Too much? Too little? Too far? Not far enough? Like the Good Shepherd, he didn’t want to lose even one of us along the way. Each person was important.

Fr. Rugel allowed us to grow. He encouraged us to grow.

With all the changes, the fundamental truths were never forgotten, nor were they ever glossed over. Quite the opposite! The truths expressed in Scripture, the Creed, in Church teaching, the importance of Mass, of Prayer, and of the Sacraments- are the foundation of this Church we call Our Lady of the Valley. And Father Rugel saw to that!

Even though our church is more than bricks and mortar, doors and hinges, or plumbing and wiring, we do need a place to come together to worship, to learn, to socialize, to exchange ideas, and to educate our children.

Ideas and dreams may be limitless, but financial resources are not. A good pastor must be a good administrator, a good steward.

Father Rugel listened a lot. He saw a lot. He dreamed some dreams himself, but the responsibility to sort it all out was his. How best to serve the mission of our parish with the resources available. He never thought he had all the answers. He sought advice and information, and more advice, and more information, if necessary.

Many a hard decision had to be made and he made them. And Father Rugel did well.

His attention to everyday expenses was legendary! We laughed. We teased. Yes, sometimes we even grumbled, but we always loved him for it.

We at Our Lady of the Valley have always had everything we needed and much more without "going into the red", and without undue hardship. This was due to his wise and disciplined stewardship, and for that we were and are truly grateful.

Father Rugel’s role as teacher was always very important to him. He truly wanted us to know and understand the Bible, the Mass, the Sacraments, the Creed, Church teaching. Not just the bare-boned facts, but the why and the how. Why is that true? How did this come about? And how does all this translate into how we live our lives!

There wasn’t an approach to teaching these lessons that he hadn’t tried. He tried to reach each person "where they were at", Six years old or sixty. Eager to learn or not particularly eager at all. Quite knowledgeable, or hearing some of this for the very first time.

CCD, our school, homilies, brief talks right after Mass, classes, one on one, outside speakers, group discussions, videos, books, leaflets. He used them all. It was consistently obvious over the entire thirty-two years that he wanted each and every one of us to know and understand more. Because the more we knew and understood, the more we would be able to love and serve God and each other. And that was what it was all about!

The Christmas Eve Mass, a 6:30 AM Mass on a weekday morning, or a 9 AM Sunday Mass, each Mass was said as if it were the only Mass that ever would be said - with reverence and devotion. He encouraged us to experience the same reverence and devotion ourselves, to appreciate the very unique opportunity we have to come together to worship God as a family at Mass.

He always gave the sacraments to people, to individuals, to persons and his love of God would always shine through. For him, the sacraments were another opportunity to serve God and His people.

He shared our joys and our good times. He helped us through the not so good times, the sorrows, the fears, and the pain. We all felt his compassion and concern. And we shall never forget!

He was always God’s good and faithful, humble servant. He knew no other way.

He was our shepherd, always caring for us while showing us the way to God.

We are forever grateful for the gift of Father James J. Rugel. We were truly blessed in knowing him and he shall always live on in our hearts and in our prayers.

Revised from a tribute by Pat Van Steyn to Father James J. Rugel for the parishioners of Our Lady of the Valley, on Sunday, January 10, 1993.

You asked for something brief. I cannot express it any better or shorter, than simply stating, "Father Rugel was a Priest's Priest".

Father was a very humble man who loved OLV with a passion. I can still vividly remember the day 32 years ago, when he rang our door bell for the first time, with his warm smile, to welcome Mary and I to the neighborhood and the OLV parish community. That visit by Father made us feel so welcome, and set the stage for our family's involvement and commitment to OLV over the years. He will remain in our hearts forever.

Ben & Mary De Luca

Over 33 years our founding pastor, Reverend Monsignor James J. Rugel, oversaw the growth of OLV from a cornfield to the vast complex of today. We remember that he never judged anyone. He was a humble, holy, hard working, and completely altruistic servant of our parish who will be greatly missed by the many whose lives he touched with his paternal devotion and wisdom.

Eileen and Frank Heary

My first recollection of Father Rugel is sitting across the kitchen table having a cup of coffee when he stopped by our house to welcome us to Wayne and invite us to join Our Lady of the Valley Parish. The very first thing he did was to bless us and our home.

Father Rugel was a very good man and an extra fine priest. Not only was he a man of hospitality he was a man of invitation and calling. By that I mean that he was always inviting people to become involved in parish life. He also could see beyond people’s weaknesses to call them to leadership and challenge them to be more.

I think that he was a man who was ahead of his time, in terms of his vision and realization of what our church’s need would be for the future. He was a priest who truly welcomed "all" to the table of the Lord. He accepted people where they were at and took them in regardless of how they might be "classified" by the universal church. He was also ahead of his time in how he opened up and participated in dialogue with our Jewish brothers and sisters. He was also ahead of his time in how he accepted women into pivotal roles in parish life.

I doubt if there was ever a time that when anyone of "his flock" was sick or in a hospital that he wasn’t there to offer kindness, compassion and prayers of blessing. He was always reaching to "touch" people in one way or another.

We had neighborhood meetings, had Masses in backyards, in homes and on porches. Our loss is Heaven’s gain.

Sharon Crenshaw Fr. Rugel was a humble man who walked with Jesus and invited us to go with him.

Carol & Ray Tinney

Here are 2 short stories, the first is from my wife, Dianne, and the second is mine.

The first time I ever met Father Rugel was shortly after we moved into our home in Wayne. I was still unpacking when the doorbell rang and there was Father Rugel at the door to welcome us to the Parish. I explained to Father Rugel that I was not Catholic but my husband and two children were. I invited him to sit down and we had a nice talk. But before he left he asked permission to bless our house. Thereafter any time we met, Father Rugel always had a big hello for me; he never forgot who I was, even though I didn’t attend church.

When I think of Father Rugel I always remember Boy Scout Troop 108 giving him a fly fishing outfit for his retirement. Then whenever or wherever we met, he told me how much he treasured it and enjoyed using it.

Bill & Diane Rickard

From our first meeting when my family registered at O.L.V. in 1972, until a recent encounter with him at lunch, I have always admired & respected Fr. Rugel. He was a man dedicated to his church & his parishioners & he always demonstrated a deep spirituality. In times of personal & family need he was always present & helpful. While Fr. Rugel had a rule about not accepting dinner invitations at parishioners' homes, you could count on his arrival at your home five minutes after the moving van pulled away, to bless the house.

He was a great priest and a good friend.

George Hundt

Fond memories of Father Rugel. There are so many of them. He was the quintessential Parish Priest. He always projected the dignity of his office, even without saying a word. He loved to fish, but not as much as he loved his parishioners. He blessed every home. He said countless Masses in unusual venues for a family’s special occasion. He never had to be asked twice to visit a sick parishioner.

While he embraced tradition and was far from a revolutionary, he was also most receptive to the enrichment of change. Women were given very responsible positions in his parish staff. He welcomed the breath of fresh air from Vatican II and enthusiastically presented these new ideas to his parishioners. He strongly supported dialogue with people of other religious persuasions, including an extensive sequence of sessions with our Jewish neighbors in Wayne which touched many people deeply.

While he did much to be proud of…he never seemed tempted by the sin of Pride. He never used his title "Monsignor" which he richly deserved. So we are both saddened by the loss of this wonderful man but also pleased that he has moved on to receive his richly deserved reward. Hopefully, when it is our turn to approach Heaven, he will be there to lead us to an even more splendid parish he will have founded there.

Austin & Maureen Maher Gratitude and love to a wonderful man who, each year, was always a big part of Sacred Heart's Agape Retreat.

His wisdom, insight, and knowledge of his faith, along with his comforting demeanor and gentleness, defined what these retreat weekends are all about. He will truly be missed.

Lisa A. Tramontano Agape Retreat Team Sacred Heart Parish, Dover Our memories of Father Rugel go back to the beginning of Our Lady of the Valley Parish. He was truly the Father of our Parish family.

In the Galcher / Radzik family, he performed our wedding in 1968, gave first Communion to our son Christopher in 1979 and Baptism to our son John in 1982. Our four sons all attended Our Lady of the Valley School with Father Rugel influencing the development of their faith throughout.

We will always remember him as a kind, soft spoken father who loved his parish family. He was an example of strength and serenity in a very hectic world. We thank God for giving us the gift of Father Rugel to guide us on our faith journey.

The Radzik Family

Joe, Valerie, Joe, Mark, Chris & John Some reflections:

In the early days of the parish, the 6:30 AM (actually started at 6:25 in order to get some of the men off to work) daily Mass was celebrated in the livingroom-chapel in the rectory living room of 608. Near the end of the Mass, one of the altar boys, yes even at the early Masses, would go off into the kitchen and plug in Father Rugel's coffee pot. Shortly thereafter, the perking and aroma were noticed in the chapel. At the end of Mass, Father had a fresh pot of coffee ready for his breakfast...

Our daughter Donna made her First Communion at a home Mass celebrated by Father Rugel....but we were involved in a snow storm. Although Father was able to return to the rectory, our guests including families from New York and Pennsylvania had to remain. We then had to provide beds and bedding for about 20 people....

Mike & Barbara Renaldo Father Rugel guided our three sons and one daughter through OLV School, Altar boyhood, etc. One of our sons got it right when he said "What we have here is another Curè of Ars." The Curè is now a Saint with the title “Patron Saint of Parisian Parish Priests.“

Maureen & Austin Maher

"The Son of Man has not come to be served, but to serve."

When I hear these words, I think of Father Rugel, God’s faithful Servant Leader. Father found joy in a life and leadership devoted to humbly caring for and serving everyone. He guided us as a community and as individuals to grow in our love for God, and to identify and use our gifts to serve God.

I thank God for his gift to us of Father Rugel.

Rose Trivigno

We renewed our wedding vows with Fr. Rugel on our 25th and 50th anniversaries and were with Fr. Rugel on our 60th. Great man!

George and Anne Snyder When Mass was in the High School, Fr. Rugel ran out of hosts. I got in the car and went to St. Paul’s, my former parish. Fr. Stanley said "They don’t know how to do it?"

Geo. Snyder from Virginia He will be missed by all here at [St. Joseph’s] Hospital. He came here faithfully every Tuesday and more often if we needed him. He was even here this past Tuesday. He was a great source of comfort to anyone he went to visit. People asked for him whenever they were patients here and in St. Joseph’s Wayne Hospital.

Rev. Martin D. Rooney Director, Mission Services

Father Rugel was a very close friend of ours. We moved to Pennsylvania a year ago but until that time, we resided in Jefferson Township, only 5 minutes down the road from Father Rugel. He came over quite frequently and we shared many, many wonderful conversations. He was supposed to come here last month to visit us in our new home. We were going down to pick him up and bring him here, but the icy roads made us postpone it. He was supposed to come in May, but I guess that was not to be.

Father Rugel was family to us, as I am sure he was to many. I think that it’s important that people realize although he lived alone, he was never alone. He was a part of a very loving family, especially close to his brother Matt and his wife Rita. Their home was his home. They made an apartment for him in their home. Father Rugel lived in a quaint small home owned by his parents in Cozy Lake. He called it the old homestead.

But, whenever he felt the least bit lonely, he would pack up and go to Matt and Rita’s place, his second home. Over the years, he had some health issues and he would stay with Matt and Rita. They would take wonderful care of him. He once said to me “some people think that I live a very lonely life, never having a family to call my own, or children of my own. But Matt and Rita shared their children with me. So in a sense, I did have my own children. I had theirs. I never felt alone. I have been very blessed.”

His ministry was so important to him. His brother Matt told me that he worked at St. Joe’s this past Thursday. He was staying at Matt and Rita’s house until last week. He wanted to go home.

About 8 years ago, Ralph and I started a new retreat program and asked Fr. Rugel to be a part of it. He has been doing retreats yearly since then. He heard confessions in his home and never said no to anyone who asked for help in any way.

He loved to travel. He was super organized. Never went anywhere without his date book.

I served on the Pastoral Council for 5 years with Bishop Rodimer. Father Rugel was so proud of me for serving and would make it a point to come over and discuss the latest happenings in the diocese with me. He had a way of making you feel that no matter where you were in your life, you were there for a purpose and good would come of it.

He loved his Church and his fellow priests, who he talked about quite a bit.

I will miss him dearly. I have lost a dear friend but I am happy for him that he now knows the peace and the rewards of his dedicated, unselfish life.

Gloria & Ralph Weichand We’ve know Fr. Rugel since 1958, part of our association was with the CFM groups he organized. The six couples in our group got together socially every July 4th for a family picnic. Fr. Rugel was always invited but in 1960 we knew he was on a trip to Rome and would not attend.

That afternoon Fr. Rugel showed but with a roll of paper under his arm. He was like a little boy in a candy store – his eyes sparkled, his grin was as wide as possible, he almost twitched with excitement. He related “I got a telegram a few days ago and came home immediately. Just three words ‘Congratulations, Preakness, Bill’ (Bill was Msgr. Louis). I’ve been given the chance to start the new mission in Wayne.”

With that he unrolled a survey map which showed the 9 ½ acre plot that was to be the new site of Our Lady of the Valley. He stayed a while but was too excited to sit long; he was already organizing his mental list of every thing he had to do.

Four years later we moved into the parish. The Church and school already existed. Fr. Rugel was still without help in running the Parish; it would be another year before he got his first Curate, as they were called in those days. Initially, the Sunday Bulletin came out in purple from a Hectograph machine but soon changed to black when Father acquired a used Mimeograph machine. For years he typed the stencils and ran the copies himself in the basement of the Rectory.

Fr. Rugel had no limits when it came to Our Lady of the Valley; he was dedicated to serving the people of his Church. If it meant a little extra effort on his part that was OK as long as God’s work was being done.

Barry and Marcia Collins Patrick Daly was his name. He lived essentially his whole life in Brooklyn and rose to the rank of Captain in the NYC Police Force. He had retired and now his body was being attacked by Parkinson’s Disease and his mobility had become severely restricted. He was no longer able to attend Mass at a church. Always a very prayerful man, this restriction must have been very bothersome to him.

It was 1976 and he was visiting his daughter Maureen’s home in Wayne on the occasion of his grandson’s First Communion. Since he could not travel to Church, their remarkable Pastor, Fr. Rugel, had readily agreed to say the First Communion Mass at home. The kindly priest came, said the Mass as reverently as if it were the only Mass ever to be said (as Pat Van Steyn correctly noted earlier was his style), gave Communion to everyone in the family including Brendan, the eight year old First Communicant, chatted amiably with everyone present, then left to continue his busy schedule. And it was a busy schedule for this was Christmas Eve and Fr. Rugel’s schedule had been adjusted to accommodate the needs of a man from Brooklyn whom he barely knew, but whom he treated as his parishioner. We trust that both of these fine men have met again as they reap the rewards of their lives of selfless service.

Maureen & Austin Maher

I have many memories of Father Rugel. One of the most memorable occurred when receiving First Communion could be held in the home and this is what our son, Keith, chose. We gathered our family and asked Ed's brother, his wife (non-church goers) and Ed's Aunt (President of the Rosary Society) to attend.

Young Eddie lost track of time and arrived a couple of minutes after Father had begun Mass. For whatever reason, he decided that it was important that he have other shoes on rather than sneakers. Father continued and thank God for Aunt Vera, since she had all the responses down pat, because Ed and I were completely distracted.

Father had given me the recipe to make the Host for Communion. The first batch was great so I did not hesitate to make it again. When it came time for Communion I had the bread on the table, we gathered around while Father blessed the bread and proceeded to break it. It wouldn't break. After many attempts, he gave it a Karate chop and was then able to distribute Communion. Sitting in the Living room everyone was chewing loudly, and finally, swallowing. Father finished Mass and I wonder if he rethought having First Communion in the home. Daughter Suzanne's comment was "I'm making my First Communion with the group!"