How to Improve Your Social Life

People differ greatly with respect to the level of their social skills and abilities, and their abilities to make people like and want to be around them. For some, relating to others is so easy they barely have to think about it. They, throughout their lives, have no problem having lots of friends and plenty of opportunities for romance.

For others, the social “game,” so to speak, is incredibly difficult and unnatural to them. They might have very few friends or opportunities for romance – if not none at all.

For these latter people, they might look around at how everyone else in the world gets along and wonder if there is something wrong with them. They might wonder “do people like me?” or, even worse, “do people hate me?”

Unfortunately, in many cases, the answer might be, on the whole, no and yes, respectively. Having to deal with insecurities that you are not well liked or even hated can be incredibly demoralizing, and can certainly impact the rest of your life.

If you’re having thoughts of “do people hate me?” and fear that the answer might be yes, it is incredibly important to try and figure out why, and try to see what you can do about it.

Keep in mind that whatever problems you have, socially, are not your fault. You did not choose your genetics – if they are in any way deficient – you did not choose your parents, and you did not choose the other influences that you had growing up that shaped your development as a social being. If you are unpopular, lonely, or afraid that people hate you, it is not because there is something wrong with you, and you do not deserve such a situation.

With this in mind, you can move on to try and improve your situation.

The first thing you should do is try and evaluate your standards for people, both for friends and for potential romantic partners. Are they too high? Are they unreasonable? In many cases the reason you might be driving people away is that you find it hard to “settle” for being around people that might not totally understand you and might not be as smart or interesting as you want them to be. Sometimes, just learning to accept more people – and different people – can be an unexpected way to start making new friends.

Finally, if you’re worried that people don’t like you, you should try and figure out what it might be about you that is unattractive to people. Is it simply your looks? In that case, try and dress better and take care of any glaring features in your appearance, if you can. Is it that you’re an asshole? Learn to be nicer to people. Are you simply a strange person? Try to meet others who are as strange as you or, at least, will understand and accept you. In all cases, be constantly looking for ways you can help yourself, and make it more likely for you to be more satisfied with your social life than you are now.