I just got back to London with a flue after a month and a half absence in the South of France. Actually, that is where I come from. It has been working for an art exhibition, family, book presentations. And some real holidays.

And now where to April? To London for another year!

With desires, fears and wishes on the bags, I brought with me.

An update of my last adventures? It might help me to set new goals for the ” rentrée”, or getting back to school.

The first year in London worked quite well, and I got to publish my first book, in France in the meanwhile.

I am up to for another year in London, should I look for a regular job or finish my last book or both?

will I drag my body to the gym today? Outside it is raining, and I am in front of an office with a bar of chocolate. Is my will strong enough?

I still have a few hours before the place closes down. Ok, yesterday it was a holiday, this morning I had to go grocery shopping… and then start working on my book…

When there is a will there is a way, a wise person has said… but is there? I have enrolled to the gym already, Brian gave me a ‘tour guide’ and I admired the facilities and the place… I also bought myself a fitness suit.

So?

Well, I also have other objectives for the day, for example to walk about 12000 steps a day. Not to mention reading, writing and research funding, …

you are leaving us in a couple of days and I have to admit I have left a lot of things pending in my work. Projects I have promised to fulfill, artistic work, my book, etc. Emails I haven’t answered. I wouldn’t come out as dependable these days in the artistic event organization.

Am I responsible for this? Yes, partly. It was I who wanted to go against the current, I who daydreamed as a form of escape when the wannabe boss was giving me a hard time.

When things become hard, the hard get going? Do we need to fight or fly?

I did both. I fought, as much as possible. The wannabe boss threw me out of the Platform. But the Platform was not a form of Paradise.

I also fled. In my imagination. I disappeared! I took a spring break. I worked alone. On my project A that is not, as usual, bringing me money right away.

I didn’t bother to email people who complained, and instead, I wrote blog-posts.

So, I found a way to keep me happy, for most of the time, and made some other people unhappy, but for unimportant questions. My email wasn’t the center of their existence, after all.

Has this behavior affected my image as a professional? A little bit. But I can wash myself clear if I take action now.

The thing is, it is important to feel empowered. To feel again that my action can change the direction things will take.

And for a while, I wasn’t sure about this.

Now that I am ready to act again, independently of the presence of a wannabe boss, I realize how precious it is to find a group of like-minded and like-hearted, creative people.

One can be great, but an encouraging environment can transform us to something even better!

And after all, talents are important only when they are developed and used for the common good 🙂

you know this is my first blog anniversary don’t you? A year ago, I decided to transform myself in order to find true love and a paid job that I love. The wannabe boss, a sort of aggressive figure in my world environment inspired me to put my thoughts down and watch how things go.

And now what?

Have I fulfilled all I was looking for a while ago? Have I transformed some of my wishes? Myself? Neither? All of them?

There is a form of transformation happening, taking different forms.

Has my everyday life changed?

Well, I still don’t have some sort of financial stability.

The wannabee boss kicked me out of the Platform of artistic events, and I didn’t succeed in my funding efforts or job applications during this period. I haven’t moved my stuff out yet, and I am looking for a new working place.

But, I might have a possibility to associate myself with new partners I have just met, mmm I don’t know if I can trust them yet.

I am happy to have advanced with my work, and there is a publication project in France for something I have written a while ago, a small publishing house is interested in it.

The love of my life? I have flirted, kissed one or two people, daydreamed with B at the café. I have listened to the almost love confession of H, my ex, currently in the middle of another relationship. No, I am not interested.

There is also a four-year old little boy who has invited me to go on holidays “just the two of us”. I might need to wait fourteen years and see if his offer is still valid.

So, romantically speaking there is progress, but still scope for improvement.

Hmm, I am the love of my life for now, with the possibility to extend this love to another person, the rest of humanity, animal/physical and non physical entities, ….

As to blogging, it has been such a great experience!

So much fun and it gave me the possibility not only to express thoughts and feelings, to keep track of them, but particularly to interact with wonderful and creative co-bloggers!

Somehow, I don’t feel desperate if my X or Y application doesn’t work. In the past, I was really sad, thinking, am I not good enough for them? Should I give up? As if this was my unique chance.

Now I feel more confident. Somehow, I will make it. I can apply to x and y, learn where I want to go and not just throw applications for positions which don’t mean much to me. And feel that I have a bigger project and these small steps are intermediate goals, part of a larger picture, not the main purpose.

Happy Birthday April4June6, and thank you for this beautiful adventure!

thanks for this beautiful weekend in Paris, we didn’t have so mild autumn days the last years, so we were out and about the city: in cafés, parks, shopping centers, bookstores, or simply, in the streets.

I was having a friend visiting, someone I haven’t seen for three years; it was good to catch up, and somehow, this visit was very uplifting for me! And on Saturday night there was an even bigger gathering with other friends at a tiny restaurant, we were about a dozen, so great to be together!

Old and new friends together, is realizing where we came from and where we are now. It makes us reflect on where we want to be in the future.

Seeing old friends makes us go back to the time we were hanging around together, and get out of a time capsule. We realize what has happened in between: how we have changed and how we haven’t, what things have been accomplished and other not, …

A few years ago, I was having an idea about writing a novel, but hadn’t finished yet. I meant to organize artistic events, but the idea had not materialized yet. Right now, a novel is here and I am talking to publishing houses; there is also a translation that started. Considering the artistic event organization, I have made progress with initiatives that have met success, like the one in the one this summer, in the South of France.

The next step is to find partners and people who can complement me to achieve more and better 😉

Anyway, the bonus with positive friends old and new, is that we can focus on our accomplishments, even if they are small and decide to accelerate! This is what happened to me.

I wrote down a number of things I would like to see done and started … action

Having friends is like having mirrors, but at the same time, it can be a way to become perfect: our qualities together, make us a hell of a group!

Goodmorning October,
in the last few days before you go, I would like to review the most important moments of this blog for me, and see how it can continue in the last three months of 2014 🙂
So, here is my very first blog-post on March 31rst 2014: the starting point!