This was a week of disappointments. As with most things in my life, it all began with a book. One of my joys is to come home from my
day job (at the bookstore) to find a parcel with a free book sitting on my stoop. This time the package contained something extra
special: Cantata-140 from Gollancz, a Philip K. Dick I had never heard of! I immediately hit the reference books. There are easily
a half dozen titles on my shelves that would have the information about how I could have missed this title. The best book on Philip K. Dick is
Lawrence Sutin's amazing literary biography Divine Invasions. Well written and well researched, Sutin ties the events in Dick's
life with his writings. With Sutin's comprehensive chronological survey and guide to Dick's works, Divine Invasions is a must have
for every Dickhead.

Turns out Cantata-140 is just a reprint of The Crack In Space. I've read all of Dick's books, and this is one of the
worst. Interestingly, it was written between Clans of The Alphane Moon and The Three Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch, two of
Philip K. Dick's strangest and most original books. Within ten minutes I went from elation to annoyance.

I really can't slight Gollancz for attempting to cash in on his popularity, although I do hold them responsible for deceiving their
customers. If I had seen Cantata-140 in the store, I certainly would have bought it. Nowhere on the book does it mention that it
is a reprint or that it originally had a different title. (To be fair, when the novel was first published in the pages
of Fantasy & Science Fiction, it was called Cantata-140.)

Deception of readers is an age-old publishers trick. How many of us have brought home what we thought was a new book by a favorite
author, only to find out that it is a simple repackaging with a new title? There ought to be an international law that requires
publishers to alert the reader when a book has been re-titled.

This trick applies to other media as well. The South Korean giant gorilla film A*P*E* has been renamed and redistributed
several times under titles such as A*P*E*: Attacking Primate Monster, Attack of the Giant Horny Gorilla, King
Kongui daeyeokseub (South Korea release), The New King Kong, Super Kong, and Hideous Mutant (in 3-D!). Doesn't
really matter how you dress it up, the movie is a stinker. Inept script, not-so-special effects
featuring a guy in a bad gorilla suit, and atrocious acting make this film laughable. The horrible giant ape versus giant shark scene
is still one of the worst monster fights ever shot. Pour perfume on shit and you get shit-smelling perfume.

The other source of disappointment came at work. Half Price Books buys more than books from the public. Records, CDs, videos,
audio cassettes, laser discs, and DVDs can all be sold there. This week, someone brought in the two DVD set of Armageddon. That
there was enough material from this crappy movie to make two discs is shocking enough. When I noticed the manufacturer though, my
heart sank. Criterion is a producer of "important" DVDs -- films that deserve special treatment. Classics such as Seven Samurai,
The Lady Vanishes, Jean Cocteau's Beauty & the Beast, John Woo's The Killer, The Seventh Seal, This Is Spinal Tap,
Shock Corridor, M, Skjoldbjaerg's Insomnia are among the approximately 150 Criterion discs to date.

It's not that Criterion has never produced crap before. They did Michael Bay's The Rock, which is yet another awful film. But
at least it had some enjoyable bits, unlike Armageddon, one of the stinkiest movies of the 90s. It is literally
unwatchable. Believe me, I tried. It was on cable 24/7 for awhile. Each time I sat down and started to watch, I was flipping channels
within moments. Infomercials were more fun, and a hell of a lot more realistic. I would rather watch A*P*E*. At least that one
is bad enough to be fun with its goofy effects. By contrast, Armageddon is very slickly done with great special effects... and
no soul. I bet if you held the DVD up to a mirror, there'd be no reflection.

The argument could be made that Criterion really should not have allowed The Blob (original), Robocop, and
Carnival of Souls to bear the company logo. These three films have historical and/or artistic merits within their genres. At
least The Blob featured a very young Steve McQueen in his first starring role. Armageddon, and to a lesser extent
The Rock have neither.

The week wasn't a total waste. I did manage to pick up two more Harry Whittington books. Whittington was the best selling paperback
writer of the 50s. He wrote primarily mysteries and westerns, but
dabbled in other arenas such as romance and historical fiction. In 20
years, he sold 150 titles. Ironically, his best selling novel all but ended his career. Whittington penned the
second Man From U.N.C.L.E novel (Doomsday Affair) for $1500. That was it, NO royalties. It was his last book
for Ace. Ace had previously bought thirty books from him and had always paid him royalties. After Doomsday Affair spent a
year on the Chicago Tribune paperback bestseller list, Whittington decided that he'd had enough and retired. He did
sell three books in the next seven years, because according to Whittington: "I felt guilty when I wasn't at my typewriter." In
1975, he started ghosting (as Ashley Carter) the Falconhurst novels about the Mandigo slaves, which were originally written by Kyle
Onstott and Lance Horner. (Whittington's agent for that deal was Anita Diamant, who today is better known as the best selling author
of The Red Tent.) Sadly, Whittington died in 1990 at 75, mostly forgotten, and with only a handful of books in print. Several
of his westerns are available in large print as part of the Linford Western Library. The three omnibus volumes of The Dimes of
Harry Whittington (with two crime novels each) from Disc Us Books, Inc, and one of my favorites, You'll Die Next, from
Carroll & Graf are the only others available.

I was first introduced to Harry Whittington's novels in the late 90s by Joe R. Lansdale and Bill Crider. Crider is a Whittington
pusher. He believes, and rightfully so, that everyone should experience Whittington's works. Crider has written several essays about
him, and will gladly discuss Whittington whenever the opportunity arises. In the past ten years or so, I've read about a dozen Whittington
novels, all of them westerns or mysteries, and I've enjoyed all but one. While he is
no Chandler, Whittington's prose is seamless and effective. At no
point does the prose distract from the plot. And plot is what his work is all about. Whittington continually keeps the reader on edge
as the action unfolds and plot twists in ways unimagined.

Even though he sold hundreds of thousands of paperbacks, Whittington's books are difficult to find, so you can imagine my joy at
acquiring two books that I didn't own. The original mass market Black Lizard reprints of Fires That Destroy and
Forgive Me, Killer now sit proudly on my bookcase. I approach collecting Whittington like I did Philip K. Dick. When I started to buy Dick
titles in the mid-80s, they were almost all out of print, so I had to hunt for them. It took me ten years, but I finally got all of
his novels and short story collections. (Of course, by then the vast majority of his books had been reprinted.) Whittington is a bit
more of a challenge. His titles may not be as sought after, but people are less likely to give them up. They are more likely to
destroy them. You see, in his heyday, Whittington was more widely read than Dick, hence bought by more casual readers. Casual readers
tend to view a book as disposable when read, so don't always keep it in good shape. I bet many Whittington books were just read over
and over again until they fell apart. I will go out of my way to buy Whittington titles, but just like with Philip K. Dick I won't pay a lot. It
is the thrill of the hunt -- finding my prey at an affordable price.

All weeks are full of ups and downs. Makes me wonder what next week will hold. Hopefully more Whittington, less deception,
and no Armageddon.

Not content with just being a regular columnist for SF Site, Rick Klaw decided to collect his
columns, essays, reviews, and other things Klaw in Geek Confidential: Echoes From the 21st Century (available September
2003 from Monkey Brains, Inc). As a freelance editor, former book buyer, managing editor,
and bookstore manager, Rick has experience with most aspects of the book business.
This column is the beginning of Rick's third year writing "Geeks With Books." Don't feel sorry for him. Instead, buy his book when it comes out.