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The Dilemma: You two broke up. Maybe it was his idea, maybe it was yours, maybe it was mutual, but you’re donezo. Caput. Finished. Perhaps he’s now dating your best friend, or got back together with his ex, who you hate because OMG wut a b1tcH, or maybe he’s just loving the single life and wheeling a different broad every night at the bar. Whether you want him to know you’re angry or just want him to want you back, there’s a right way to go about it. There’s also a very, very wrong way, which seems to be popular among the lady-folk.

WRONG: Spend all of your time on social media sites posting passive aggressive tweets and statuses about some “unnamed” asshole. Have your friends like and retweet these updates so he knows your girls have got your back. That’ll show him. This is great too because you won’t look bitter at all. Instead, you’ll look like a strong independent woman who don’t take no shit from no man! No one will ever be able to tell you’re secretly sobbing into a pint of low-cal lemon sorbet every night.

Some other status ideas: “luv bein single!!!!!!!” or the lyrics to Independent Women. Wait, no, Survivor. Fuck it, any Destiny’s Child song will do.

Don’t forget to cry, drunk text him, makeout with his best friend and then make a Facebook album called “Summer of Singlehood!”

RIGHT: Grow up. Get off the computer. Get a life, and for fuck’s sake STOP drunk texting him.