January, 2011

Giving up on a difficult chase when you are never getting to the destination is a common trace in most human beings. Anytime I am asked to differentiate between a successful person and a failure, my answer has always been simple; a successful man is the one who believes in perseverance while a failure dwells on giving up.

The above distinction points out the correlation between Perseverance and Success. Without perseverance, Success becomes a conception which is fully attributed to Luck. (more…)

I never thought I would see Bobby Brown release another track in this life time, but this is how the music industry can be, gone today back here tomorrow! The track is ok, nothing spectacular but I guess with the right marketing you never know! Listen to ‘Get Out The Way’ and comment!

The new and improved slim and sassy lookin’ Jennifer Hudson is now working on her next single ‘Where you At” written by R.Kelly. I have to say I do love this one and she is no doubt an amazing vocalist. (more…)

What don’t we know about success yet? We seem to know the ins and outs of success and yet many of us with all our efforts cannot achieve the success we desire in Life. This has lead to a lot of us settling for less or giving up on the concept of achieving success in life.

We know success is relative, success belongs to hard working people who are able to keep a consistent momentum with their struggle, and also we fully have embraced the fact that success is not a destination, but a continuous journey.

With all the above at our finger tips and under thorough implementation, like some huge igneous rock, we remain stagnant in our endeavours. The only part of us that seems to move is our imagination and even that, we are beginning to feel like harebrained individuals and would soon give up on the fantasies of success we deploy in our minds. (more…)

As I’m sure most of my UK comrades will agree the UK musicians just don’t get enough props and I know they can compete with the best of them! Much to my delight and joy when I came across the amazing sounds and works of Cherri V. Prior to very recently I had not seen nor heard of Cherri V and I’m always glad to come across fresh UK talent.

So who is Cherri V?

Cheri V has been described by print media as ‘an awesome blend of unique rock/pop/RnB…a stunning talent of a writer/singer all rolled into one, is the juiciest cherry on the top of any musical cake’. Born in London, Cherri V is the niece of the infamous Soul Legend Mica Paris and has been singing and showcasing her work since the young age of 5.

The first thing I thought when I came across Cherri V was, what’s with the red hair that everyone is sporting nowadays, BUT all that aside her voice is fresh, new and there is no doubt that she is talented and will go places. I checked out two of her videos, The rock influenced track entitled ‘Till The Sun Comes Up’ and her recent track in 2010 ‘The Show”. I much prefer the first track just for it’s nostalgic track by Nirvana ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’. Memories!!!! However in the new track produced by T2 has shown a more slinkier-sassier side!

Cherri has numerous collaborations to be proud of, from the likes of Gnarls Barkley, Wiley, and the Sugar Babes. Her former band days with the RnB trio, Trinity Stone, who formed in 2005, signed to Sony/BMG, were short lived. In 2007 Cherri grabbed an opportunkty for a solo carrer and her first debut album, ‘Fast Cars, Silk Sheets and Favourite Guys’, released in 2009. Cherri V is set to release her

Some say that opposites attract. I’ll have to be honest here and say yes they do. This is the only reason it is even acceptable in romantic comedies and romance novels. There is research, from the psychological to the biological to the social, to bear out the theory. Women are attracted by the smell of men with a different gene pool than theirs. High-strung people want a partner who will act as a calming influence on their tempers and even the bad boy wants a nice girl to take home to mama. Analogies are given with the north and south poles of a magnet and the reason more people are heterosexual. Yeah, opposites do attract but for how long?

You see, differences creates an initial attraction – one person has traits that the other doesn’t or vice versa and for some people, this is exciting; in other words, attractive. So in the right circumstances, these two people will get together. They believe they are in love. During the honeymoon phase of the relationship, they may be able to work around their differences – read, they don’t sweat the small stuff – but what about the long term? Let’s look at some examples; one’s a vegetarian, the other loves beef, one’s introverted and the other an extrovert, one loves football and the other hates all things sports; or an extreme one where one is a frugal control freak and the other an impulsive spend thrift. Just imagine two such people in a marriage with maybe one or two children. I can’t see it, lol.

I know by now, some of you are thinking in your head about those your friends or relatives who have been dating or married for donkey years and who are polar opposites. Hold your horses please. Let us consider this very well. Remember ‘birds of the same feather flock together’, or ‘show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are’? These sayings are referring usually to a person’s beliefs, the substance that makes the personality. And this is the key to any relationship; our values. It doesn’t matter what we see on the outside, differences in looks, activities, likes and dislikes, most people who appear to be opposites actually share a similar way of looking at life. Though they may show this perspective in differing ways, the things they hold dear and what they value are the same.

Like I said earlier, relationships with opposites usually start off quickly and well. This is because they are largely based on sexual attraction or simply lust. However, these feelings are short-lived and in the long run, may not be enough to make a relationship work. The mismatch between opposites is more obvious in the long term because personality and attitude traits often come out later, as a relationship progresses out of the initial stages. The effort necessary to resolve differences means that emotional cracks normal in most relationships deepen more easily. The people who become too involved too quickly before they realize these differences will usually begin to feel unfulfilled and look for a way out.

The fact is that most people will only remain happy and at peace together when their basic life values agree. If the couple don’t want or need the same things, and have different values and beliefs, that relationship may be bound for failure. Some will argue that being opposites can work when differences are given less importance and both people are open-minded, and have the ability to compromise and communicate. But how many of us have this ability and how many will go the long haul? It is very few of us are that are saints or martyrs, so it is not surprising that most times, real differences create conflict and eventually lead to the bitter breakup of opposites in a romantic relationship.

So this is my final answer to our question. Opposites may attract but they rarely stay together in long term relationships. Yes, opposites may attract during times of high sexual tension, like in dating, courtship and the early months of a marriage. However, opposites will certainly clash when it comes to differing personality traits, attitudes and values, especially in the long term.

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Written & Submitted By: Myne Whitman

Myne Whitman is a pen name. She has lived in Nigeria and the UK and now lives with her husband in Bellevue, Washington. Quiet and romantic Myne volunteers as an ESL tutor for a local charity and also writes full-time.

Her first novel, A Heart to Mend, is on AMAZON and in bookstores. She can be found on Facebook (/Myne.Whitman) and Twitter (@Myne_Whitman)

With the influx of celebrities recently debuting shorter hairstyles, it appears that Destiny’s Child’s own Kelly Rowland is the latest celeb to head over to the ‘short’ side. Although Kelly rocked the crop hairstyle well during the earlier days of Destiny’s Child, she flaunted longer locks for her solo career. However, latest paparazzi shots show that she has now reverted back to cropped hair.

Ms. Rowland is just the latest in a long line of celebs that are choosing to cut their locks, in place of shorter styles; Amber Rose is famous for her blonde ‘baldie’ style, and Solange Knowles has also done it.

Cutting your hair can be quite a drastic change, yet a completely personal choice; sometimes, hair makeovers are undergone in order for personal transformation, or just something to do out of boredom. Whatever the reason may be, all new hairstyles must look presentable- whether long, short, fake or real!

As a student on a tight budget, I rarely buy Hair and Lifestyle magazines. However, I just couldn’t resist buying this month’s issue of ‘Pride’ (UK’s biggest Afro-Caribbean women’s magazine) – the magazine’s focus for this month was the subject of Black hair and beauty. Personally, this issue could not have come at a better time for me, as I have recently been contemplating whether to cut my hair or not.

Whilst I am still yet to reach a decision, I discovered a friend of mine had beaten me to it by actually going for the chop- an absolute bald chop; some would say that as very ‘bald’ of her. I think she looks stunning though, a true Masai princess.

I think this is what defines beauty- when you are able to still look beautiful regardless of what you may do to your hair. The truth about beauty lies within; hair is not the definition of beauty (although it is an element of it).

Here are some few tips in case you decide to go under the scissors for the first time.

First rule. Please don’t go for a Nicki Minaj hairstyle just because she is your role model and is inspired by her unique style. Don’t even try Amber Rose either. Find out what type of face shape you have. Ask your stylist, and what sort of hair style will be suitable on u. Here is a link http://www.thehairstyler.com/ when you click on alternative, it will help you browse on short hair, medium hair etc. In the “hairstyle info” you will find out which style you can go for, according to your face shape.

Show the style to your stylist when you have figured out what style you will go for. Book an early appointment.

If it is you first time for a cut and uncertain, but still want to go on with the process, go for a crop, a length that is “weavable” or can be braided in case you regret. Getting a long hair has never been a problem for us women.

Do not go for “the big chop” if you just broke up with your boyfriend/girlfriend. It won’t make you feel new or good. The chances are there.

A New Year is here and I am certainly sure that most of us have surrounded ourselves with rules and plans as part of the New Year’s resolution in order to help us realize our goals and achieve the success we deserve.

It is perfectly right and admirable as human beings to have regular reflection and planning exercises, via which we examine, scrutinize and careful analyse the steps we have taken, the yet to be taken in the light of whether they have helped or would help in achieving the success we desire in life.

As we engage in the above, one thing we should make a prime concern and influence it to the greatest altitude is our desire for success. We all have a desire to achieve a lot, but “Is our desire for success greater than our fear of failure?” (more…)