Main menu

Tag Archives: relationships

For me and my family, yesterday was a day filled with melancholy, gloom and silence. One of our uncles, my father’s best friend and a gifted man passed away due to a sudden heart attack. As the night lurked inside the house, my thoughts started jumping from one end to another. Stories, emotions, people and roles, everything prowled inside my mind. How an able, humble, intelligent, social and a perfectly functioning man was reduced to a frozen dead body? What is it that actually makes your life peaceful till the time you perish?

Today, I’ll sum up some of these thoughts (gathered from my favorite authors & psychologists) my ideas to live a wholly contented life before the time runs out (though I myself don’t follow all of them, but that just means I need to try harder) 😀

Should I go for it?

The first thing that I consider as the biggest problem of life is ‘dilly-dallying’. You keep on vacillating between two decisions, two opportunities, two issues and two choices. A lot of time this irresolution gives you either regrets or takes a good chunk of opportunities away from you. So, when the time comes just believe in your thoughts, calculations & instincts.

What meaning do we derive from life? Do we see it as a course of attaining our desires? Or is it a path to perfection?

I see hundreds of people in the world running around to get what they want…let it be happiness or material things; they’re all concerned about getting their wishes fulfilled. But many a times this urge crosses the line between wanting and lusting. Yes, Lust for happiness, hunger for money, the craving for power….

I know that ‘lust’ is usually used in a pervert meaning but I use it here to define a Want with a Negative Connotation. That’s where many of us cross the line between ‘wanting something’ and ‘obsessing about something’.

This ‘Lust’ is evident, presenting itself in different disguises ubiquitously. Display of this hunger can be observed if we just look at the camouflage of others and ourselves for that matter…

I saw it in the brothers fighting for inheritance.

Noticed the how cautiously the children divided jewelry of their ‘Late Mother’. Everything was right except the hunger, corroborated in their gestures!

Isn’t it discernible in the pejorative comments of a politician about a party which he joins a few days later? Sadly these ministers don’t even bother to hide their yearnings!

Love is the weapon used commonly for this concealment….It was there masked as love, when a mother tried to avoid the marriage of his son with the fear of losing him.

Marriage for the sake of beauty, money or sheer attractiveness…it’s the marriage of desire not of emotions.

The presence of envy in the gaze of a sister! The jealousy secretly sneaks out from the corner of her eyes when she adores her gorgeous sister.

I saw it when a priest said he was devoid of the worldly desires while grabbing the meaty delights presented to him.

Its everywhere, in me, in you and in all of us though the quantities may differ.

I don’t say that ‘Wanting’ or ‘Desiring’ is a sin in itself. But perhaps the moment you start concealing your hidden motives from the world, you’re crossing the line between ‘hunger’ and ‘aspiration’!

We all have mothers who say “ Mera Bacha Mere Jigar ka Tukra”. I always interpret this as ‘for a mother, a child will always be a part of their soul and body’. They feel innately connected to their children! So that when the child is in pain, the mother suffers. When he is in joy, the mother is in bliss. What a creature a mother is! A creature who loves us unconditionally and bears with our inanities without even complaining.

But what happens when we betray this loving creature? We know that we are connected to her forever so when we try to betray her, what happens?

Imagine a part of your body…let it be your hands or your feet, they try to betray you. When they perform the act of betrayal….what happens to your body? The body tears apart! The betrayer breaks away your body and tears it into pieces. Splashes of blood and pain everywhere…the betrayer becomes numb and soul-less after the betrayal. But the body, it keeps on feeling the pain of that brutal act. The pain keeps on lingering forever…till the body perishes.

Analogous to the betrayal of the body, is the infidelity of relationships. When two souls are connected like that of a mother and a child, betrayal leads to a eternal pain which lingers on forever. Just as we know what our body is doing, the connected soul knows that the other is on the path of treachery.

But they remain silent, may be they are too weak to face the truth or perhaps they have faith that their loved ones won’t go wrong.

These misconceptions and blind trust leads most of us to the suffering, which never diminishes. Yet, the love in the universe goes on….mothers keep on loving their children & children keep on breaking their trust….Yet the cycle never breaks….

The only way to break this cycle of infidelity is to strengthen the betrayed. Strengthen them to face the truth before it leaves an imprint of pain. And to remind the betrayers that they can deceive their loved ones, but their deeds will get back to them when it will hurt them the most!