tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826Fri, 09 Dec 2016 15:45:16 +0000Jokes By Jimhttp://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)Blogger2146125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-218148716257186935Fri, 09 Dec 2016 15:45:00 +00002016-12-09T10:45:16.235-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Paris has made all public transportation free to cut back on
pollution from traffic. Although it isn’t known what is more dangerous,
breathing in the toxic smog or being stuck on a train full of Parisians who
haven’t bathed in the past six months.
Sheryl Sandberg says she doesn’t think fake news stories on
Facebook swayed the election. Although a bigger concern is that people who get
their http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_9.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-2853351323797701664Thu, 08 Dec 2016 15:39:00 +00002016-12-08T10:39:54.066-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Donald Trump has been named Time Magazine’s “Person of the
Year.” The reaction of most people across the country was to wonder if even
Time could be the victim of fake news.
Donald Trump has been named Time Magazine’s “Person of the
Year.” To which Trump immediately sent out a tweet asking why it hasn’t
happened every year since 1974?
Pope Francis I has warned the media over the “sin” of
http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_8.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-106816663915702661Wed, 07 Dec 2016 15:30:00 +00002016-12-07T10:30:09.366-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
The GOP says it is getting ready to cut the government
workforce under Donald Trump. All except the department that will be working
double overtime shifts dealing with the crisis backlash from all of Trumps
posts on Twitter.
Donald Trump has criticized Boeing for being “out of
control” on costs of building new Air Force One jets. With his anger over the
expense, and dislike of traveling with http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_7.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-7733299222713473723Tue, 06 Dec 2016 15:09:00 +00002016-12-06T10:09:44.568-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A website that was labeled as “fake news’ is suing the
Washington Post. The worst part is that the Post got the tip about the story
from Janet Cooke.
A study says eating nuts every day can make for a longer
life. Although that is something to question the next time you see a squirrel
flattened out on the roadway.
A woman delivered a baby on a Southwest flight to Orlando.
The problem when http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_6.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-8907245267388186773Sun, 04 Dec 2016 18:33:00 +00002016-12-04T13:33:37.546-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
MIT researchers have developed a computer that can predict
the immediate future by examining a photograph. Mostly by looking at a selfie
taking by someone while driving and prognosticating the car will soon be
colliding head on with a tree.
The Saudi national bank system was reportedly damaged by
malware from Iran. Although the software was not very sophisticated as anyone
trying to access anhttp://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_4.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-8057071248973921793Fri, 02 Dec 2016 15:59:00 +00002016-12-02T10:59:29.058-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Amazon took in 31% of the online spending over the Cyber
Weekend. The other 69% went to telemarketers, international lottery scams and
Nigerian princes.
Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim says Americans should be more
worried than Mexicans about Donald
Trump. Which is pretty stern coming from a billionaire who because of the
devaluation of the peso made his statements from behind the wheel of http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_2.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-8362916849256207093Thu, 01 Dec 2016 15:34:00 +00002016-12-01T10:34:56.670-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Scientists in Denmark say that eating insects, blood and
animal brains is the way to make the future food supply sustainable. Which is
no big deal in Denmark as insects, blood and brains are still more appetizing
than a plate full of lutefisk.
ESPN has reportedly lost 1 Million subscribers in the past
two months. Apparently even men have finally given up paying a cable bill of
$150 a month http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/12/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-5324684116626969181Wed, 30 Nov 2016 15:31:00 +00002016-11-30T10:31:50.396-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A Texas man has been jailed for using Twitter to harass
others. That kind of behavior could get him sentenced to four years as
President of the United States.
Scientists say religion has the same impact on the brain as
sex, drugs and music. Which is interesting as most people going to church hear
the same sermon each week warning them about the dangers of sex, drugs and rock
and roll.
The http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_30.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-6976776108582161392Tue, 29 Nov 2016 15:20:00 +00002016-11-29T10:20:13.811-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Microsoft admits its Chinese language chatbot filters out
certain government censored topics. Mostly politics, and religion and anything
other than how great it is to live in China.
Microsoft admits its Chinese language chatbot filters out
certain government censored topics. To which Donald Trump is saying “Can we do
that with Twitter?”
Fears are mounting there could be multiple bank http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_29.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-4924552227315354621Sun, 27 Nov 2016 15:18:00 +00002016-11-27T10:18:37.506-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Former Cuban dictator Fidel Castro has died at age 90.
Donald Trump immediately took credit, saying that was one of his campaign
promises.
Former Cuban dictator Fidel Castro has died at age 90. He
will be given a military funeral and be buried at sea. Meaning his body will be
tossed from an oil drum and Styrofoam raft.
Former Cuban dictator Fidel Castro has died at age 90. He
took control http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_27.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-6591027317201952125Wed, 23 Nov 2016 15:25:00 +00002016-11-23T23:18:30.375-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
North Korean leader Kim Jong-un has written a nine page
letter to Donald Trump, demanding an end to “hostile nuclear threats.” On the
positive side, he also offered to sit down and exchange ideas on hair
conditioning, moisturizing and coloring.
A report says almost half the world will be online by the
end of this year. The other half will just have to find a way to go through
life without http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_23.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-1817261487762093562Tue, 22 Nov 2016 15:11:00 +00002016-11-22T10:11:49.683-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A poll says a record 77% of voters perceive the nation as
being divided. The other 23% say the others are completely wrong.
A poll says a record 77% of voters perceive the nation as
being divided. The other 23% can still remember the days of George W. Bush,
Bill Clinton, Ronald Reagan Jimmy Carter…
A poll says a record 77% of voters perceive the nation as
being divided. Apparently after http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_22.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-8274078830671787941Sun, 20 Nov 2016 15:44:00 +00002016-11-20T10:44:54.678-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A study says cursing is linked to higher intelligence. Just
ask anyone who has gone to the Beverly Hills Mensa chapter meetings and seen
them attended by Alec Baldwin, Mel Gibson and Ozzy Osbourne.
China is pressing tech firms to police the Internet.
Apparently they are worried about the content that could be making it past
censors into the five government approved websites the Chinese peoplehttp://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_20.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-4724066191433716538Fri, 18 Nov 2016 15:09:00 +00002016-11-18T10:09:58.885-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A study says pessimism is bad for people’s hearts. To which
people who have heart disease are saying “I knew this would happen to me.”
A study says smart people need more time by themselves.
Which is easy to do anymore, especially for the ones who are looking to hang
out with other smart people.
A study says smart people need more time by themselves.
Which is sad when the local Mensa http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_18.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3772867937070628786Thu, 17 Nov 2016 15:19:00 +00002016-11-17T10:19:36.774-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
The DHS is warning the holiday season could be a target for
terrorists. Which people would still rather deal with than having to be around
their relatives for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner.
The DHS is warning the holiday season could be a target for
terrorists. Which is exactly the same thing the DHS has been telling us about
every day on the calendar since 2001.
A report says the http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_17.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3153134527107415800Wed, 16 Nov 2016 15:40:00 +00002016-11-16T11:40:28.014-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A poll says 70% of voters don’t feel the media is honest.
The other 30% are demanding a recount because they don’t trust who put the
survey together.
A poll says 70% of voters don’t feel the media is honest.
The sad part is that they feel that way because they are instead believing the
politicians who are telling them so.
A life sentence has been handed down to a Kansas woman who
fed her http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_16.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3710811899710195838Tue, 15 Nov 2016 15:38:00 +00002016-11-15T10:38:36.333-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
This week’s “supermoon” is being blamed for many reports of
people with insomnia and extreme emotions. Which would be easier to believe if
it wasn’t so close to last week’s election.
Turkey is warning its people that the U.S. may be unsafe for
tourists. They are advising anyone who travels to the U.S. that the best way to
avoid problems is to wear a sticker saying “I didn’t vote.”
Turkey http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_15.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3058304468438274851Sun, 13 Nov 2016 15:46:00 +00002016-11-13T10:46:33.414-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Anti-Trump demonstrators were called hypocrites by
supporters on Twitter for not accepting defeat in a democratic process. Now
where would any of them gotten the idea the election may have been rigged?
Facebook falsely pronounced some of its users dead with
memorial status on their pages. Although fortunately, their Facebook friends
know that no one is really dead until there are pictures http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_13.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-7286121223733066147Fri, 11 Nov 2016 15:15:00 +00002016-11-11T10:15:59.365-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
The FAA has implemented a no-fly zone over Trump Tower in
Manhattan. That is bad news for pilots flying out of JFK and LaGuardia airports
who use the route so they can use Donald Trump’s hair as a wind vane.
A report says anxiety after the election is so high in New
York City that people are booking emergency therapy sessions with
psychiatrists. Although many others are finding the election http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_11.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3695061599610599137Thu, 10 Nov 2016 15:25:00 +00002016-11-10T13:22:55.957-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
California voters turned down a ballot initiative to require
porn stars to wear condoms while filming. Democrats across the state were in
favor of the condom measure, saying we wouldn’t be in the mess we are in if
only Donald Trump’s father had bothered to wear one.
California voters turned down a ballot initiative to require
porn stars to wear condoms while filming. The downside was that http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_10.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-8436830990612140178Wed, 09 Nov 2016 15:20:00 +00002016-11-09T10:20:08.340-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
Donald Trump is the next President of the United States.
When George W. Bush heard the news he said “This is finally my chance to move
up one place!”
Donald Trump is the next President of the United States.
Even George W. Bush was saying “Those people will elect anyone.”
Donald Trump is the next President of the United States. The
good news is that Hillary Clinton will get a full refund http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_9.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-4489979238568367451Tue, 08 Nov 2016 15:12:00 +00002016-11-08T10:12:27.345-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A report says the Trump Hotel in Washington, D.C. was
defaced. Apparently someone sneaked in and put up a large sign saying “Trump.”
Some CEOs are blaming the presidential campaign on poor
results. That, and the fact that people aren’t buying their products because
those same CEOs laid them all off from their jobs back in 2007.
China has passed a “draconian” cyber security law.
Apparently http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_8.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-3193160923243710163Sun, 06 Nov 2016 15:30:00 +00002016-11-06T10:30:31.380-05:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
A hospital in New York has banned political debates between
patients for health reasons. What’s worse is having to deal with the loss in
business from all the patients who will be moving out of the country once they
see the election results.
The Mayor of Turin, Italy is planning to make it the first
all-vegetarian city in the country. In the U.S, we have a term for vegetarian
cities. Ghost http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_6.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-2357395065847706523Fri, 04 Nov 2016 14:24:00 +00002016-11-04T22:23:39.950-04:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
The World Series Game 7 between the Cubs and Indians had 40
Million viewers, the most since 1991. Mostly just so people could watch
something that didn’t have anything to do with the upcoming election.
The World Series Game 7 between the Cubs and Indians had 40
Million viewers, the most since 1991. In fact, it also beat the viewership of
every World Series game in 1994 by at least 40 Million.http://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_4.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6180826.post-7092824537778810939Thu, 03 Nov 2016 14:39:00 +00002016-11-03T10:39:19.771-04:00Greetings, Oh Faithful Readers! From the most prolific joke writer on the planet...!
The Chicago Cubs won the World Series, taking game 7 in
extra innings that included a rain delay. When you have waited 108 years to be
a winner, who needs to rush things?
An Indiana priest says requests for exorcisms are at an
all-time high. Mostly people who are worried about the consequences of what
will happen to them after they cast their vote next week.
An Indiana priest says requestshttp://jokesbyjim.blogspot.com/2016/11/greetings-oh-faithful-readers-from-most_3.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Jim Barach)1