Note: This is a seattlepi.com reader blog. It is not written or edited by the P-I. The authors are solely responsible for content. E-mail us at newmedia@seattlepi.com if you consider a post inappropriate..

Fringe: According to Newton

Over There, Head Imposternerd instructs his nerd herd to complete a Faraday Cage around their Bowflex of Doom, seeing as it’s a giant universe-destroying somethingorother, and who knows what kind of discharge it’s going to put off. Indeed. When Walternate arrives, Head Imposternerd shoos the Nerd Herd away, and informs Walternate that they were able to strip away Fauxlivia’s chromosomes from Pacey Jr.’s blood sample. They only have half of Pacey’s genetic profile to work with, but hey! That could be enough to turn this tin can on, right? Walternate quotes him some Oppenheimer: “Now, I am become death, the Destroyer of Worlds,” (obvs.) and then the two of them high five and get on with their plan to bust some universe.

Over Here, some shepherds notice that the sheep are acting crazylike, and a swarm of locusts go flying by and the shepherds are all HMMM, until a bright blue light in the sky vaporizes them and the poor sheep like mosquitos in a bug zapper. BZZZT.

At Dagobah Lanes, Sam notices that the bowling balls are behaving weirdly, one ball tapping the one next to it for no good reason. Sam heads into a back office where he pulls out one of those momentum ball desk toys that you give your dad on Father’s Day after you realize OH MY GOD FATHER’S DAY IS TOMORROW, MAYBE BROOKSTONE IS STILL OPEN. Fun Fact: These are called “Newton’s Cradles.” And now you know that. Anyway, the balls start tapping each other without any encouragement. Sam is all, “Concerned, I am concerned. Yes, hmmm.”

Olivia wakes up in Pacey’s room, and slips downstairs only to be confronted by a naked Bishop because MAD SCIENTIST! When she heads back up to Pacey’s room to snuggle some more, both of their phones start ringing furiously.

The Fringies meet in Accord, NY, where the giant bug zapper in the sky singed the ground and zapped the shepherds and their sheep and everyone’s like, “Yep. Something weird happened here, at roughly 6:05 in the a.m.” Bishop immediately conjectures that a vortex must have appeared over the field, which, yeah, OK, fair enough, it did, but then again, Bishop is always conjecturing that vortices have caused one thing or another, so he eventually had to get lucky at some point, right?

At the Bowflex of Doom hanger, Mrs. Roboto is having a serious with her team of nerds. It seems the Bowflex of Doom just went and turned itself on, and no one knows why, and everyone is having a good ol’ freakout about it. Mrs. Roboto calls Col. Abaddon on her Sprint ™ phone with FaceTime or the Sprint ™ equivalent to FaceTime, so eat it, Apple nerdz, you’re not the only game in town, you know, and appraises him of the situation and the fact that the Bowflex of Doom turned itself on at exactly 6:02 in the a.m. because it’s an early riser. And then we need Bishop to explain to us that the Bowflex of Doom is what bug zapped the field and the shepherds because we’re idiots.

Pacey is frustrated because he’d been operating under the assumption that he was super-special and the only one who could turn the Bowflex of Doom on and BOO. Bishop says “quantum entanglement!” which basically means that Walternate somehow turned the Bowflex of Doom on from Over There and everyone kinda shrugs because it makes as much sense as anything. And then AsteriskAstrid alerts everyone to the fact that there have been a few more events including one in Newton (wink) where all organic matter was just wiped out. A la The Blight. Time to invest in coffee beans, kids.

Over There, Fauxlivia and her nanny? I guess? it’s unclear? take Pacey Jr. out for a walk, only to have it interrupted by a call from work because of course. Soon enough, Fauxlivia is in the back of a SWAT van on the way to what Jeremy Darling describes as a “Class Ten” event, which is apparently alarming, especially since it’s coming from Liberty Island. But before the team can go wave their little electroboxes around on the island, or whatever, Jeremy Darling receives a call from Walternate assuring them that there’s no need! Nothing to see here! OK goodbye! Fauxlivia, certainly irritated that her day off was interrupted FOR A BIG PILE OF NOTHING has a HMMM…

Meanwhile, in Walternate’s lair of evil on Liberty Island, Walternate and Head Imposternerd are wringing their hands that their little plot to blow up the other universe hasn’t really improved matters Over There, because it was supposed to? I didn’t realize it was a zero-sum game that they were playing, but fine. Fauxlivia arrives and straight-up asks Walternate if he used the piece of tech she brought back from Over Here to fire up the Bowflex of Doom, and if that’s what caused this Class Ten event, and Walternate is all, Uh, maybe? Fauxlivia wonders what will happen to the folks Over Here, LIKE HIS SON? And Walternate is all, So what? Who cares? I’m saving Pacey, Jr, and that’s all that’s important, Nosy.

Over Here, the Fringies aren’t exactly sure what to do next. They can’t strip the Bowflex of Doom for parts (and perhaps shouldn’t have put it together in the first place, but you know, hindsight and the whole 20/20 thing) because thanks to its quantum entanglement with the other one Over There, the sheer amount of energy that would be released could be on this side of catastrophic. Olivia confirms from Mrs. Roboto that “they” picked up an electromagnetic spike in upstate New York around 5:45 or so. NOW WAIT. 1. Who picked up an electromagnetic spike in upstate New York? Massive Dynamics? The government? NOAA? NASA? Who? 2. Why were “they” monitoring anything, much less the upstate New York area for electromagnetic spikes? 3. No, really, who are “they?” OH BUT LET’S JUST GLOSS OVER THIS, SHALL WE? Because the point is, Olivia remembers from the boon gained from her journey into the unknown her time Over There that Fringe Division would monitor for electromagnetic and radiation spikes and strange thermal patterns as a means of predicting where a vortex event would occur so they could amberize it before it happened. And while they do not have enough amber Over Here to do the same, at least they can try to give people in the effected areas a heads up? Maybe? Well, that’s the plan for now, and Olivia heads to Massive Dynamics to help Mrs. Roboto work out the particulars. Once Olivia leaves, Pacey is all, Know what? How ’bout I just go turn the Bowflex of Doom off? And Bishop is all, Huh! Yeah, maybe! The Observer did tell me to give you the keys and save the girl. Maybe that’s what he meant?

AND OH MY WORD, ARE THEY ACTUALLY SHOWING OLIVIA DRIVING TO NEW YORK?!?!!!?!

Once at Massive Dynamics, Olivia and Mrs. Roboto work through the early detection logistics which involve satellites and cell phone towers and enough amber to stop 8 to 10 events. Which is woefully inadequate. Mrs. Roboto is all, YEAH, WELL, I THOUGHT YOU AND PACEY GETTING IT ON WAS GOING TO SOLVE THIS LITTLE PROBLEM, SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD LOOK IN THE MIRROR, LADY. Olivia is like, What the what? And Mrs. Roboto explains that a friend of Bell’s who happens to know a lot about the Bowflex of Doom told her some stuff and then told her to keep it super secret or he’d disappear. Olivia is like, Wait, what the what? And Mrs. Roboto goes on to further explain that this friend, it was Sam the Jedi Bowler. And Olivia is all, WHAT THE WHAT?! Mrs. Roboto shows her the different translations of The First People and how she figured out the anagram for the authros’ names was always Sam Weiss. But! Now he’s missing. And Olivia is all, No worries! I shall find him! Instead of being like, Wait, go back to the part where Pacey and I being in a relationship is supposed to avert our entire universe from being blown up at the seams? Can we discuss that some more, please? Because I’m pretty sure you just implied that the FATE of the UNIVERSE is contingent on Pacey and me DOING IT.

Speaking of doing it, a young couple in Saratoga Springs is about to get to just that when another bug zapper flares up in the sky. Bzzt. Nearby, Sam watches the bug zapper through an old television screen and jots down a few fancy math problems. “To my calculations according, good this is not. Hmmmmmm.”

Over There, Fauxlivia sings a lullaby to Pacey Jr. and puts him to bed. And apparently, Fauxlivia called Jeremy Darling over to babysit while she hops universes to go fetch Pacey so he can talk Walternate out of being a homicidal universe killer. Formula’s in the fridge, pat his back if he gets fussy, and be sure to tell him I love him if I NEVER RETURN FROM ANOTHER UNIVERSE. K bai!

Fauxlivia marches into Head Imposternerd’s lab on Liberty Island, waving a gun around and demanding that Head Imposternerd take her to the technology that sent Walternate Over Here to retrieve Pacey the first time around. He hands over two blinky cylinder things, but in lieu of instructions on how to use them, Head Imposternerd suggests that she not return Over There because Walternate will be very, very disappointed in her. Fauxlivia smacks him in the head, and runs off, only to be trailed by some soldiers. Cornered, she tries to activate one of the blinky cylinders, but HAHA, nope. And then she’s caught by the soldiers, because she’s a sucker.

Over Here, Olivia swings by Sam’s apartment. But he’s not there. End scene.

Pacey puts on a wetsuit in preparation for getting on the Bowflex of Doom while Col. Abaddon and Bishop discuss how dangerous this might be. Answer: Very dangerous. But what else can they do, you know? Time to strap in, Pacey! Everyone says their goodbyes and tries to not get all sappy about it, and tries to smear Pacey’s hands with electro-conductive gel for some reason. Pacey marches right up to the Bowflex of Doom, places his hands on it, and ZZZZTTTT! is shot backwards off the machine, bleeding from the face. Well, super. Now what?

Rushing through the hospital, rushing through the hospital, rushing through the hospital, and Olivia meets up with everyone to learn that this is serious business.

Bishop heads to the hospital chapel where he has a one-on-one with God, because, why not? It worked once before with the white tulip and everything. Bishop notes that he changed: he was willing to let his son die, and that should count for something. And because what Bishop did was unforgivable, God should punish him and spare the world, because, after all, what did the world do wrong, you know? (I mean aside from being constantly terrible all the time.)

In the waiting room, Olivia notices a strange light coming through the window and heads out to investigate. Sure enough, the sky is all weird and OH HEY, there’s Sam. “To the machine take me. Yes, hmmm.” Olivia is all, WHAT IS GOING ON? But Sam is all “Olivia, to trust me now, you have, please. Much time we have not. Yeesssssss,” before running off.

Over There, Walternate has locked Fauxlivia up in the Olivia Cell, where he explains to her that she should understand what he’s willing to sacrifice. After all, she was willing to leave her infant son behind to serve the greater good. Fauxlivia is unsure how killing 6 billion people is “the greater good,” but Walternate calls her naive, and explains that she’ll stay here until it’s all said and done, turns the lights off in the cell and walks away. OK goodbye.

We’ve only got two episodes left for this season, folks, and the producers have made it pretty clear that the remaining episodes, beginning with this one, are all of a piece. As such, the episode is mostly moving parts, ushering us towards the big finale.

That said, there are some allusions here, most notably the issue of sacrifice. Both Walternate and Bishop choose to sacrifice their son, Pacey in an attempt to save their own worlds. Interestingly, both acts of sacrifice appear to be for naught, at least for now. The story of monotheism, the Israeli people’s covenant with God, begins with a similar story of filial sacrifice (or at least willingness therein) with the Binding of Isaac. When he was 75 years old, Abraham (at the time, merely named Abram) is notified by God that he will be the father of a great nation, and Abram is all, well that’s cool! But then 10 years pass, and Abram is all, Hey, God, I’m not getting any younger here, don’t you think I should have a kid by now? And God is like, no, seriously, you’ll have a son one of these days. For real. And after an interlude with a handmaiden, a son and a very jealous wife, God finally decides it’s time for Abram (who He has decided to rename Abraham) and Sarai (who He decides is now named Sarah) to have a son of their own. Sarah eventually does, indeed, become pregnant and has a son, Isaac when Abraham is 100. And then! A few years later! God is like, Yeah, guess what? I need you to sacrifice your son, Isaac. Cool? Cool. So Abraham marched Isaac up Mount Moriah, making the kid carry the wood upon which he was going to be sacrificed, I guess on account of Abraham being like 170 years old or whatever. And just as he was about to bring the knife down, an angel calls out, WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA. Just kidding! Why don’t you just go sacrifice that ram in the bushes over there, and we’ll call it even. Cool? Cool. And then God pipes in and is all, Yeah, since you were willing to kill your son because I asked you to, your descendants will be blessed.

This isn’t the only story in the Bible about a father willing to sacrifice his son for the greater good, of course. The crucifixion of Jesus is, for Christians, the ultimate story of a father willing to give up his child for the salvation of the world. And not to equate Pacey with Christ or Bishop (or Walternate for that matter) with God, but the allusions are there. Like Abraham, Bishop has to be willing to give up the child he fought so hard for. And like God, Bishop and Walternate understand that their son’s death, the blood of their child (and grandchild) might save their respective worlds. Interesting that this episode aired on Good Friday.

Finally, just a couple quick notes: the city to first be affected by The Blight is Newton, Massachusetts. Named, obviously, for Newton, one of the greatest (if not arguably the greatest) scientific minds in history. And what was his first name? ISAAC. But this made me wonder about the other geographic locations mentioned in the episode. Saratoga Springs isn’t particularly interesting, but Accord, New York is.

ac·cord (
v. ac·cord·ed, ac·cord·ing, ac·cords
v.tr.
1. To cause to conform or agree; bring into harmony.
2. To grant, especially as being due or appropriate: accorded the President the proper deference.
3. To bestow upon: I accord you my blessing.
v.intr.
To be in agreement, unity, or harmony.
n.
1. Agreement; harmony: act in accord with university policies.
2. A settlement or compromise of conflicting opinions.
3. A settlement of points at issue between nations.
4. Spontaneous or voluntary desire to take a certain action: The children returned on their own accord. He confessed of his own accord.

It might have just been a coincidence that the writers chose this small town for this particular episode to introduce the end of the world, but I can’t help but think about the tension between the two universes, the lack of balance between them, and their struggle to gain power over each other. And that perhaps, in some way, what Walternate has inadvertently done is not necessarily start a war between the two universes, but to start the process of finding an agreement, a peace between them. They have long suggested in the series that destruction of one universe over the other doesn’t necessarily have to be the end result of using the Bowfelx of Doom but that there instead might be a way to strike a balance between the two universes, to find a comprmise, an accord. Perhaps by bringing the fight to us, Walternate has exerted enough pressure on others, including Fauxlivia and Olivia, to find and create this third way.

Note: This is a seattlepi.com reader blog. It is not written or edited by the P-I. The authors are solely responsible for content. E-mail us at newmedia@seattlepi.com if you consider a post inappropriate..