BnB’s Wish List: Teleporters like in Portal

This has been on my wish list ever since my father sat me down and taught me how to play DOOM. And now, as a man, I believe, with a genuine childish optimism, that I will live to teleport in this reality (unless it turns out that a sort of parallel reality is required).

The term, teleporting, has been around since Charles Fort coined the term in his 1931 book, Lo!, but I have to believe that the idea of teleporting has been around a lot longer in the minds of the wonderers, dreamers, and lazy lazy fat people.

In 1993 it was discovered that quantum teleportation is totally possible so long as the original object being teleported doesn’t mind being completely destroyed, which implies that what comes out the other side is a replica, like how a fax machine works, which weirds me out. And since then some goobers have successfully teleported a photon(1 meter) and a laser beam (0.5 meters).

There’s plenty of babble that leans towards the idea that the laws of physics might make human teleporting impossible, but I can already tell you that it is because I know that I won’t die until I’ve teleported. Thinking of this I often wonder how a teleporter would be designed. Would their be a platform (DOOM style), or magic spells (Harry Potter style), or will it simply be something you can do with some high gravity training (Dragon Ball Z style). I prefer the Portal style, but I don’t like that you have to set your entrance and exit to somewhere within your line of sight. I don’t want to walk until I can see the grocery store before I can shoot my exit over there, I’d just get a grappling hook or some sort of spider man set up if that’s what I wanted.

I think you should be able to set your own entrance and punch in a code for an exit you want, similar to how a phone works, but instead of voice, it’s human :). Plus you could just have a community fridge space where people could just teleport to their cloud storage fridge and not have to have that damned ugly box in their flat (sorry, I just think all fridges are ugly. I’ve never thought “that’s a sexy fridge”).