The One Thing All Women Should Strive For

The One Thing All Women Should Strive For2017-06-292017-08-05https://oliviarink.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/logo-olivia-rink.pngWelcome to Olivia Rinkhttp://oliviarink.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/img_3370-1.jpg200px200px

I’ve always been intrigued by independent women. Maybe it’s because I was always such a ‘relationship girl’ or that I hadn’t completely come out of my shell yet, but I admired bold women who did things their own way. To me, it’s not your hair, your makeup, or your body type that define your beauty. The most attractive quality you can possess is a confident and independent attitude. I’ve always admired women like that because it’s exactly what I wanted to be. A girl who’s self sufficient and takes her happiness and success into her own hands.

Becoming an independent female is a process, not something that happens overnight. The most self reliant women are the one’s who have worked through fear, rejection, doubt, and other hard situations to get there. Most likely, they’ve been through things that knocked them down and brought them to the realization that the only person you can ever completely rely on is yourself.

I’m writing this because I’ve been that girl, the one who allows someone else to control their feelings. I’ve played the comparison game that digs you into the hole of ‘will I ever be good enough’ and I never want to be in that situation again. I’ve experienced a few reality checks that made me realize things don’t happen for you unless you make them happen. I still have a lot to work on, but this year I’m focusing on being more independent. It’s something all women should strive for – whether they’re single, dating, or married. It’s empowering, rewarding, makes you a better friend, partner, and role model to others.

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18 admirable qualities of bold, confident, independent women…

1. If they want something done, they do it themselves.

2. They are teachable, open-minded, and understanding.

3. They maintain their own lives even while in a relationship.

4. They’re able to support and applaud other women without letting jealousy get in the way.

5. They avoid petty arguments and conflict.

6. They are assertive and have the ability to say no.

7. They thrive in the chaos of a busy schedule.

8. They ask for what they want.

9. They’re competitive and ambitious.

10. Their self worth is not dependent on anyone else’s opinion of them.

11. They don’t idolize other women. You can have role models but don’t be a fan girl.

12. They have an opinion and voice it when necessary.

13. They do things without the approval of others.

14. They take risks and aren’t afraid of failure.

15. They wear the bright pink lipstick just bc they like it.

16. They’re scrappy and creative when it comes to problem solving.

17. Every *why* is followed with a *why not*? (my bracelet I wear every day has the words ‘why not?‘ engraved on the inside. Sometimes you need a reminder of what you’re capable of.)

18. They never play the ‘poor me’ card. I don’t have a lot of pet peeves, but this is one of them. Instead of dwelling on your problems and making excuses, find a way to make it happen.

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and in the wise words of Destiny’s Child..

All the women, who are independent
Throw your hands up at me

In what areas can you become more self sufficient, confident, and independent? Who’s your female role model and why? Comment below! xo liv

Hi Olivia!
I am just coming upon you, and I have to say I am in love with what you write, and how you wear it!

I am 23 years old, working full time, and finishing up college. I am such an over thinker. When I picture my future, I worry I am not fulfilling it enough. I am afraid when school is finished, I won’t amount to anything but the same routine I have been doing everyday. Work , school, work, school… I don’t want to just be average. I want to go above, but I am just afraid I don’t know how.

Hi Maegan! Thank you! Oh girl, believe me I’m a total over-thinker too. But that’s not really a bad thing. If you don’t want to be ‘average’ then all you have to do is decide what you want your future to look like – then put the work in to make it happen. It sounds cliche but honestly if you REALLY want to create a certain job/lifestyle you’re proud of, you have the power and the resources to do it. But it’s never easy. You got this girl!

This quality is something that I’ve always wanted to be, and most people think I even am. But, I would say I’m not many of those characteristics. I tend to compare myself to other people, and the good things that happen to them instead of me, among other things. Such a great reminder, thank you for sharing!

Olivia, this post is awesome & so relatable. I’ve definitely been working on being more independent myself and it’s so rewarding to step out of your comfort zone and do things solely based on your own opinion without worrying about the the approval of others. You are definitely someone I look up to for inspiration 😊

Hey Olivia! I’ve loved following your successful journey from cheerleader to blogger! I can tell you are definitely practicing what you preach 🙌🏻 I was really happy for you when you hit 100k because you deserve it! I am learning to be more independent as a new mother and honestly just trying to get by most days 😂Motherhood is so rewarding though.
Thanks for always being classy, and having content that’s interesting to read. It’s refreshing.

Hi Keri!! Ahh that makes me happy that you’ve been following along since the good old days, haha. And you’re right – it really doesn’t matter what your current situation is – whether you’re a new mom or living the single life, we can all challenge ourselves to be a little more independent. Thank you so much for taking time to leave such a nice comment, that really means so much to me!

I have to say you are super inspiring Olivia! I love following your story and it’s so refreshing to see someone else that has such a positive outlook on life! The world needs more of that 🙂 You are such a boss babe! Keep up the hard work, I can’t wait to see what else you accomplish! XO

Hi there! I just came across your lovely blog through Instagram. I’m so happy to have found not only a petite blogger but also a fellow Chicagoan.

This was such an inspirational and empowering post. Thank you for writing it! I’m a single working professional in her late twenties and it’s always nice to get read something so uplifting and positive.

I think the toughest thing I have struggles with is to be assertive, having that ability to say no. It’s so tough when you want to please everyone but it’s impossible to do so and I need to remind myself that it’s ok to put yourself first sometimes.

What a great idea to wear a bracelet engraved with ‘why not?’ inside it! Awesome way to remind yourself what you’re capable of. I may just steal that idea 😉

I admire Angelina Jolie because she’s beautiful both inside and out, for being a globe-trotting humanitarian and for her big heart.

Michelle Obama for being fierce and independent in her own right, but also in a wonderful marriage with a man who isn’t afraid to be with a strong woman.

I recently came across your blog via Brighton and I just love you both so much. This post is so refreshing and honest… and honestly not just this post, but your whole blog… you just gained a new loyal follower!

Thanks Olivia! Keeping this list of qualities in my phone notes to remind myself about it every day. Some little failures get on the way that I tend to forget the power of being a women. Love your idea of engraving! Have a happy Holiday weekend!

These are my favorite posts of yours. Anything life related I find myself re reading those posts a few times a week. The way you relate to life, relationships, family etc..is litteraly the same as me! I have never felt so drawn to someones blog. I have always been an emotional person but also look for a deeper meaning in things, and feel life is more than just living. But always seem to find myself being stepped on for being “to nice” and always saying yes to things instead of like you said above “saying no when you dont want to”. I would love if you did a follow up blog on something just like this. Maybe like a ways to get there, or how to change your thinking to follow these statements you posted etc. I love you liv and have been following you since your first blog!

Love this! I completely agree with you Liv and always love how honest you are with your readers! Being independent can only add to a woman’s life. I think it takes most women well into their thirties to get to this point and you are already ahead of the curve 🙂

OliviaRink.com is a place for me to write about the things I love while sharing bits and pieces of my every day life along the way. I aim to inspire others through my personal stories, daily outfits, decor and design, and to be a positive role model for girls and young women everywhere.