Wronging Others For the Sake of Justice

I know that for some people, my sharing the story
of how I almost left Islam and of how I reached such a dark place that I nearly
took my own life is a cause for mockery and condescension toward me. They say
this in order to dismiss the work I’m doing and to cast doubt on the spiritual
lessons I’m sharing. They say that it is
my trauma that guides my work more than Islamic sincerity and right guidance. And
I don’t blame them.

Why? Because I know on a deeply personal level how it feels to be drowning so much in the waves of emotional pain and spiritual darkness that you feel compelled to wear the garments of religiosity in front of the people—even at the price of your own healing, self-honesty, and soul-care.

In this state, when we hear someone share their
vulnerability for the purpose of deriving a spiritual lesson—particularly if the
lesson compels us to examine our own souls and repent—our unhealed wounds force
us to reject it. Then we genuinely imagine this rejection is a sign of religious
strength and “remaining firm upon the haqq.”

What is happening in this moment is that we are
processing our religious garment as the faith itself. This is where we imagine
that the public spiritual role we are fulfilling is a genuine representation of
the sincerity and dedication to Islamic truth within our hearts. However, the
truth leak comes when we are called to the guidance of Allah—particularly from
someone we view as religiously inferior—and it threatens the comfortable
religious garment we are wearing. Thus, we react with mockery, condescension,
and seeking to expose the person’s faults or shameful aspects of their personal
lives.

In this, our hope is that no one will see our
broken soul if they are laughing at someone’s broken life.

Trials
of the Soul

We have all been in a space that threatens our
spiritual self-image and incites unhealthy pride, and we will continue to. It
is one of many spiritual trials that Allah sends while we are on this earth.
These trials are both warnings and mercies to us. The warning is in how they
expose to us the very depths of our hearts as we are called to fear Allah. The
mercy is in how this gives us the opportunity to reconnect with the spiritual
life we were seeking before we got off course. And how we respond to this trial
reveals to us whether or not our current claims of sincerity and belief in Allah
are true.

May
Allah help us respond with humility, repentance, and self-correction each time
we are face this spiritual trial.

It is because I know on a deeply personal level how
easy it is to fail this spiritual trial that I strive daily to do all I can to
protect my nafs from the evil within itself. SubhaanAllah, by
Allah, I know how easy it is to fall victim to pride and self-deception. When
we fall victim to this kibr and ghuroor, we imagine that what we
claim on our tongues about our public spiritual role is an accurate representation
of Islamic sincerity in our hearts.

And this terrifies me. And I ask Allah daily to
protect me from failing this test, as I fear meeting Him with claims of emaan
on my tongue but none in my heart.

This fear is one of the very reasons that I share
so much about my own personal struggles and spiritual trauma. While this
personal sharing doesn’t guarantee my protection from pride and self-deception,
it certainly helps.

But here’s another benefit I find in sharing my own
faulty healing journey, even as some aspects are humiliating and embarrassing at
times: There really are so many spiritual lessons and personal benefits we can
draw from them.

I remember how when I was in the throes of my own emotional
trauma and spiritual wounding, I searched so hard for stories of other Muslims
who had faced what I was facing. But I found none. I felt so lonely and
distraught that I swore that if Allah brought me through this difficult trial,
I would be at least one voice of vulnerability and self-honesty for other hurting
believers to turn to when they had nowhere else to go.

So after Allah bestowed His mercy upon me and
allowed me to hold on to my emaan and nourish my emotional and spiritual
health, I began to share my own story of navigating trauma, in hopes of being a
source of compassion and empathy to my struggling sisters and brothers in
faith.

I pray Allah accepts it from me.

But more important than my personal journey itself
is this truth that even mental health professionals and sincere spiritual
teachers have uncovered: Vulnerability and self-honesty are much more effective
in rectifying both spiritual and societal problems than wearing the public
garment of being a savior or sorts. This is where we imagine ourselves to be
“speaking out firmly against injustice” and rectifying community problems, while
almost never realizing that we ourselves can be a source of dhulm
(wrongdoing and oppression) on earth.

Understanding
the Dhulm You Prefer

What system of dhulm (wrongdoing and oppression)
are you supporting in your life?

This might sound like an odd question because
usually when we think of dhulm, we think of standing up against it to
confront someone else. But how often do we confront our own souls? And here,
I’m not simply speaking about the dhulm we do by falling into sin and
wrongdoing and then repenting immediately thereafter. I’m speaking about the
sin and wrongdoing we do to ourselves—and others—by being open supporters of dhulm
when it benefits us in some way, or at the very least when it doesn’t disrupt
our comfortable lives.

Today, our hearts are hurting so much because dhulm
has become so widespread that we witness the most horrific crimes against
humanity as a matter of course, and it’s hard to fathom how anyone could do
this to others, and repeatedly. I too am feeling that level of shock and helplessness.
What is going on with this world? It is unimaginable.

But we aren’t as helpless—or innocent—as we think.

Dhulm cannot get to this level unless it is first
supported on smaller levels.

We, this modern generation, are a people who love
injustice so long as we are the ones inflicting it. Our cries against
wrongdoing are loud and clear when it is our lives touched by harm. But when we
see some worldly benefit for ourselves, we rush to inflict harm on others then
declare that it is our right.

So amongst us are those who stand up to fight
racism then declare their own people are superior in the eyes of God.

And amongst us are men who speak openly about their
rights in the home then prevent their wives from having even minds of their
own.

And amongst us are women who speak openly about
their rights in marriage, yet keep their children from their own fathers in the
case of divorce.

And amongst us are those who fight for the right of
everyone to marry whom they chose, then verbally abuse virgin women who prefer
older men, or any man or woman who chooses polygyny.

And amongst us are parents who speak endlessly
about their God-given rights to obedience and respect, yet they make their
children’s lives hell if they so much as hold an Islamic view or personal
opinion that differs from them.

And the list goes on and on…

And then we sit and genuinely wonder why corruption
and injustice are widespread in the world, while we need only to look honestly
at how we behave in our homes and with our tongues and social media
accounts—when encountering something *we* dislike.

The true measure of fighting injustice is not when
you are suffering harm and you speak up against it, but when you are gaining
worldly benefit when someone else is suffering harm, yet you sacrifice your own
personal opinions, desires, and worldly comforts in the pursuit of what is
right before God.

Dhulm
Feels Good

Dhulm (wrongdoing and oppression) always feels good when
we’re the ones benefiting from it—and imagining it to be a “good cause.”

So today, it feels good to say that a woman who has
had unlawful sex with a married man should be forbidden from marrying him,
ever. It feels good because this new rule is for a “good cause.”

It was also for a “good cause” that some Eastern
cultures arrange marriages for their girls without their consent. In many
cases, this was to preserve the strength and stability of the families and
cultures, and to protect the family lineage and wealth from being “wrecked” by
outsiders.

And to be sure, those cultures still steeped in FGM
(female genital mutilation) claim the “good cause” of preventing sexually
promiscuous women from ruining themselves and the honor of families and homes.

It is chilling that these two good
causes—protecting “wrecking” from outsiders and preventing sexually promiscuous
women from ruining a family’s honor—are the precise reasons that we so
willingly accept this new rule of “a mistress can never be a wife” being put
forth by an American imam (and why we so willingly label sinful women
“dishonorable” even after they repent).

Similar good causes are the very reasons that many
American Muslims so willingly reject the ayaat in Qur’an that permit polygyny.

And similar good causes are the very reasons that
many Muslims of immigrant backgrounds so willingly reject the prophetic Sunnah
permitting intercultural marriage.

And the list goes on.

To be sure, nearly all of these customs and
rejection of divine guidance began with someone’s misguided, perhaps sincere,
efforts to preserve the honor and dignity of families, homes, and cultures.

But Allah tells us what has been translated to
mean, “Whosoever desires honor, power and glory then to Allah belong all
honor, power and glory. To Him ascend (all) the goodly words, and the righteous
deeds exalt it, but those who plot evils, theirs will be severe torment. And
the plotting of such will perish” (Al-Faatir, 35:10).

And let’s be very mindful that plotting evil does
not necessarily mean that we consciously intend to plot evil. We can be
plotting evil and genuinely imagine we’re just putting forth new rules for a “good
cause,” or we’re just responding “firmly” to the destruction of families
happening in our communities. Thus, our “sincerity” makes our hearts unable to
heed the warning when someone tells us to fear Allah. However, in reality, the
greatest losers in the Hereafter are those who imagine they are doing good
deeds but when they are called back to the guidance of Allah, they reject it.
This can happen in the form of the serious sin while we are still Muslims, or
it can reach the level of disbelief.

Allah says, “Say, ‘Shall We tell you of those
who lose most in respect of their deeds? Those whose efforts have been wasted
in this life, while they thought they were acquiring good by their deeds? They
are those who deny the Signs of their Lord and the fact of their meeting with
Him. So their works are in vain, and on the Day of Judgment, We shall not give
them any weight’ ” (Al-Kahf, 18:103-105).

Allah also says, “And when it is said to them,
‘Make not mischief on the earth,’ they say, ‘We are only peacemakers.’ Verily
they are the ones who make mischief, but they perceive not” (Al-Baqarah,
2:11).

Thus, we can imagine ourselves to be trailblazing a
good cause but actually be the source of serious harm (to ourselves and others)
on earth. May Allah protect us.

When Muslims are involved in these misguided “good
causes”—especially when they are spiritual teachers, imams, or scholars— they
almost always have daleel or “proofs” for why they are permitted to
either reject the teachings of Allah on the subject or to put forth new
teachings in rectfiying the issue.

I refer to this is “fiqhi acrobatics” (i.e. when
authentic evidences are used for misguided purposes, even if sincere). I refer
to the misguided ideology itself as “glorified victimhood”
(i.e. when the ostensible purpose is to respond to or remove a dhulm,
but the method involves inflicting dhulm itself).

What makes these fiqhi acrobatics and glorified victimhood
ideologies so prevalent amongst even the sincerest spiritual teachers
and imams is them confusing the Islamic right of a Muslim judge, scholar, or
advisor to give a fatwa or solution in addressing a very specific
personal problem or case, with their own “religious right” to introduce a new
rule or to forbid something that is halaal, with the “good cause”
intention of addressing a general problem that potentially affects the lives of
all believers.

The
Solution is Soul-Focus vs. Problem-Focus

What is so profound and beautiful about Islam is
that inherent within its spiritual system is a formula that rectifies both
internal problems (i.e. within the heart and soul) and external problems (i.e. within
the community and world)—at the same time. In other words, the same spiritual
guidance that gives us a direct prescription for purifying our souls and
ultimately entering Paradise also gives us a direct prescription for purifying
societal ills and ultimately establishing a community rooted in preserving the
honor and integrity of homes and families. This, while at the same time
nourishing each person’s emotional and spiritual health.

This is achieved through the establishment of
spiritual foundations, principles, and guidelines, as well as the requirement
to adhere to the rules of halaal and haraam, as well as to our
personal and religious obligations.

What is so profound in this system is that Allah
already recognizes the very problems that we are trying to fix with our new
rules and “good causes.” In this, He has given us not only guidelines requiring
us to respect certain moral boundaries and to never violate others’ rights, He
has also given us the guidelines for rectifying wrongs and atoning for sins
when—not if—we fail in our personal and spiritual duties.

At the root of this system is Tawheed—the
sincere belief in Allah and our recognition that we will meet Him on the Day of
Judgment to answer for our time on earth—and our nearly limitless access to His
mercy and forgiveness, as well as seeking our own blessings and enjoyments on
earth.

Our challenge is that we as humans continuously
confuse our worldly blessings and personal enjoyments with our spiritual
purpose and religious rights on earth. In this, we become so intoxicated by the
joys of wealth, status, and blessed marriages and families that we actually
begin believe that these joys are our rights. But in the system of Tawheed—which
focuses on the soul’s journey to the Hereafter—these external joys are trials
(i.e. tests of faith), just as our internal suffering and spiritual crises are
internal tests of faith.

When we lose sight of the Hereafter and fixate on
what we feel we deserve in this world, our focus becomes problem-centered
instead of soul-centered. This shift in focus, though often unconscious, then
leads us to address problems by rejecting certain guidelines from Allah (i.e.
intercultural marriage, polygyny in modern times, etc.) and introducing our own
new rules in their place (i.e. forced marriage, mistresses should be forbidden
from marrying their lovers even after repentance, etc.). We then defend our new
rules by pointing to societal ills like broken families, cheating men,
promiscuous women, and so on—not realizing that we are merely fighting one dhulm
by replacing it with another.

However, in our sincerity and dedication to the
“good cause,” we don’t always see what’s happening. In fact, it often takes
generations upon generation to pass before the horrific effects of our
misguided sincerity becomes apparent (i.e. FGM today).

What is deeply profound and healing about Islam is that, by the mercy of Allah, inherent in the spiritual guidelines of the Qur’an and prophetic guidance is the formula for protecting us from our own selves—personally and spiritually, and in the short-term and long-term—even when we do not even perceive the harm Allah is protecting us from.

How? Allah relieves us from the burden of
perception through the obligation of submission.

SubhaanAllah, if we only knew the immeasurable mercy in this.
The very fact that we are not weighed down by the burden of having to perceive
every potential harm in our choices is a mercy in itself. But Allah shows us
over and over again, when we trust in Him, when we believe in His wisdom, even
when it is beyond our perception and understanding (i.e. when we truly and
sincerely believe in the ghayb), He will shower His mercy, forgiveness,
and blessings upon us—in this world and in the Hereafter.

Moreover, even as He requires us to trust in His
wisdom, He gives us full freedom to live out our personal lives as we wish. In
this, we are not burdened with any specific rules of what we must or must not
do, except in our obligation to respect the boundaries He has drawn, whether in
fulfilling our own halaal choices, or in respecting the right of others
to choose their own.

For the believer who is soul-focused instead of a
problem-focused, he or she sees right away that there is limitless mercy and
wisdom in this personal freedom, even beyond what we can perceive. However, for
the one who is problem-focused instead of soul-focused, they can only see how others
are getting blessings and enjoyments they don’t “deserve,” while they
themselves are being denied blessings and enjoyments they do “deserve.”

It is this unhealthy problem-focus that inspires so
many sincere people, including spiritual teachers and imams, to introduce new
laws to prevent this apparent “injustice” from happening.

Herein begins another cycle of dhulm on
earth, which was inspired by a “good cause.”

Soul-Care
and Emotional Healing Are Needed

As I’ve mentioned on many an occasion, I know on a
deeply personal level how it feels to be trapped in a world of unhealed pain
and trauma. In this space, our wounds are in danger of becoming pockets of
spiritual darkness (which inspire us to create systems of dhulm rooted
in guaranteeing blessings that humans can see and measure) instead of beautiful
scars pointing us to spiritual light, which inspire within our lives and hearts
beautiful patience and tawakkul, as we trust that our blessings are
coming, even when we cannot see or measure them—and even when it feels like
others are getting blessings they don’t deserve (i.e. “Why does a mistress get
the blessing of a husband and blessed marriage after sin?”)

However, the journey of internal healing such that we walk in spiritual guidance instead of calling to spiritual darkness (even in sincerity) is not an easy one, and it is not one that can be achieved one day and left alone for the rest of our lives. It is the journey of the soul itself. It is the very essence of jihaadun-nafs, that heart-wrenching battle of the soul against itself.

Allah tells us in the Qur’an, “And in no wise covet those things in which Allah has bestowed His gifts more freely on some of you than on others. To men is allotted what they earn, and to women what they earn. But ask Allah of His bounty. For Allah has full knowledge of all things” (An-Nisaa, 4:32).

In this, Allah is giving us the timeless wisdom of
focusing on our own self-improvement, emotional healing, and soul-care. He is also
letting us know that there is no need to create manmade systems designed to
block the blessings and halaal choices of His servants while ensuring the
blessings and halaal choices from others amongst His servants.

Allah Himself knows what each person, whether male
or female, has earned in their lives, whether public or secret. Moreover, as we
know from the Qur’an, prophetic teachings, and personal experience what often
what appears as a blessing in someone’s life is merely a painful trial as a
result of their sins, and what appears as a painful trial in another person’s
life is really a tremendous blessing as a purification because of Allah’s Love
for them.

Because, as Allah teaches us, everyone will get
what they deserve.

And trust and believe, that beyond what Our Lord—who is Al-Hakeem, Al-Baseer (The All-Wise, The All Seeing)—has specifically prescribed in His Book and through the prophetic teachings, He does not need our help in meting out punishments to sinful people and withholding blessings from “undeserving” people.

Furthermore, if there is something that we sincerely
desire for our own lives, it won’t be achieved by complaining about the
blessings of others, or by seeking to control the lives of others. It will granted
by turning to the very One who granted it to them in the first place—by us humbly
asking Him of His bounty regarding what you desire for yourself.

If we understand this spiritual guidance and lesson from the depths of our souls, we would never seek to create or support systems that seek to do God’s job on His behalf. If we do, we might imagine we’re championing some good cause or stopping dhulm. But in reality, all we would be doing is wronging others in the name of justice, thereby sullying our own souls with dhulm.

Umm Zakiyyah is the internationally acclaimed
author of twenty books, including the If I Should Speak trilogy, Muslim Girl, and His Other Wife. In 2019, she launched UZ Soul Gear, a passion project fueled by her love of both art
and inspirational reflections. UZSoulGear.com offers apparel, wall
décor, and more, aimed at supporting and inspiring the soul-centered lifestyle.