THE NEW YORKER strate impartial justice. "Hit her back, Mickey!" she cried. Ruth joined in. "Hit her, Mickey! Go on, darling, hit her!" Mickey stood up, looked uncertainly at his mother, at Alice's mother, and at the aggressor, Alice, who had backed off and was standing with arms raised. After a strange moment, during which his thoughts were quite apparent, he be- gan to bawl. "Don't cry! Swat her!" we pleaded hopefully. All four of us were shouting at him, "Hit her! \\Tith your hands! Hit her, Mickey!" Alice's parents were, indeed, even more earnest than our- selves in their exhortations Joe actually got down on his knees and held Alice, encouraging Mickey to sock her: "Give it to her! Go on! That's the boy!" But Mickey only stood there, and Alice too be gan to cry. They both howled grievously and the double-family decision was to separate the kids for the evening. I T took quite a while to make Mickey understand that the bans were off. j\.t breakfast, at playtime, and during the evening romp, constant encouraging . shouts of "Hit her! ," "Sock her! ," "Hit her back! " were aimed at him. But the little gentleman had learned his lesson almost too well. He would not strike the lady. One morning, however, he trotted into the breakfast room all smiles. His psyche seemed to have been healed in his sleep. He walked right over to Alice, who had placed a cup on the floor and was absorbedly covering it with a nap- kin. Mickey smacked her. At first a universal cry of joy arose from our throats. Did you see that? Mickey hit Alice! All by himself, too! \Vithout anyone telling him! He's O. K. again! He hit her! '-' It was only after Alice had lost the fight and resorted to ladylike wails that her parents began to be doubtful. Mar- garet pointed out that Mickey had hit Alice first, whereas the idea had been to teach him only to hit back. Joe pointed out that Mickey had marched right up and swatted the girl without any provo- cation whatsoever. Still, we were all pretty much re- lieved that Mickey's aggressive impulses had not been permanently impaired. -MEYER LEVIN . AR.E THEY SOFTENING THE SER.VICE? A Sumn ary of Some Recent Dispatches Which Would Seem to I ndicate a Tendency to Relax the Traditional Iron Fibre of Our Army THE LOCALE THE DISPATCH Reveille is sounded each morning by a recumbent bugler who, upon awakening, blows the martial strains softly into a bedside microphone. Captain C. H. Herman of the Quartermaster Corps announced that the Army had developed a chocolate-candy bar that won't melt in soldiers' pockets. Orders ,vent out that milk served to men in training must be Grade A. The Quartermaster Depot prepared to order more than a mil- lion pairs of ne\v, dressy, tan blucher oxfords so that every man in the service V\Tould have shoes suitable for off-duty \vear on the dance floor and in the dra\ving room. Preparations for \var games were delayed because the Army couldn't find enough of its favorite-size safety pins. Electric refrigerators were installed to make sure the boys got plenty of ice-cold lemonade with their meals. A Regular Army sergeant at Fort Jay, after spending several years making rag rugs in his spare time, turned to needlework and completed a large tapestry of a Rousseau scene. The War Department decided that henceforth insignia on uni- forms must display nothing "implying animosity." Soldiers engaged in desert maneuvers went in so heavily for ice cream and soda pop, brought up behind the lines by venders with trucks, that they were unable to eat their regular Army rations. Camp Bowie, Texas Chicago Camp Edwards, 1\1 assachusetts B os ton Camp RobInson, Arkansas Fort Dix, New Jersey Governors Island Washington First Cavalry Division Head- quarters, New Mexico Fort Devens, 1\1 assachusetts Officials prohibited the use of profanity to emphasize military commands after several draftees had \vritten home complaining to their parents of bad language used by their officers. -\-V. E. FARESTEIN 85 ,:-, :,.. j.'.. . .. '1M. . *::'-: .&ID n . - . . . . " tfi " 9f4tf}.......... . . flk ' K 6{ . '.. - . ". '. . ".'..<....'.,."...::.,:..:: :,:.' : .:,... ', r-f A -f,amöU$.:.Frenêli"fòrmuló: :::t-hd'! f qnse$ .tbe:;, êêth ',! fn.?:rø-O'9 h ty "o,l,1d::: leave.s tbe mO(itb . d: an, cog' ,,/"":'1' ;;"'.ì.. ,. . and.fresh.. 'fi'j c:;7:\ "__- > -- , ;C:Q -' H ' -0- .A Îi ", LS " . <,?,'.r. Tube, 35c 'i-I;. 3 T b 1 00 --,!; . :.v e$., . ';'. ".. .. "! "'.. 1/:1::",-... , :t{; r,.. ,- I' ";i 0 * 4- ( lf- . Exdusive with Qll Elizabeth Arden.. Distributors , : i!" '" .." t ,'. i ," [ ,- .. f ji' , , . 691 ..flfT"H::.AVfN:UE:. ....NEW YORK .:::: The CandId Satirisf ::} , ,, A ti ,, ; :=:-::. .' J % $ , . t ':-':'::::. $: .w;:/ :" ..y:: i:;l:r . kLh$ ;!:A4, .:. ." .......-:.:-'":' ",,;,' ,... ;....'I : ;: ) I :'ff4G. JOHN H OYSRADT :, <<<...,.. . , -"-":::=:'. AFTER THE THEATRE in the Cafe Lounge and Snack Bar ,*, HOWARD LALLY and his Orchestra THE COCKTAIL HOUR DANCING Daily and Sunday and After the Theatre SNACK BAR Luncheon & Dinner Daily & Sunday ii::: ;:; ..::: ': -: .,..... '!; t .... .:'., ::.':= <:::"' 1 '" -':: :.,';:':. ":,}1 yfþ SAVOY=PLAZA FIFTH AVENUE 58th to 59th 5T5. "^"..:4 w...ßj