Researchers found that men with smaller testes were more likely to take charge of children’s bath-time, visits to the doctor, night-time comforting, and other parenting jobs than others who have larger testicles.

That’s right: If you want a partner who helps with the daily kid care, Jon Hamm may not be your man. At least, depending on how you read this strange study.

Apparently, anthropologists at Emory University wondered why some fathers put more energy into parenting than others, and somehow wound up measuring testicles as they relate to diaper changing. I dunno. The explanation is at eScience Commons.

But big-balled boys shouldn’t worry. One of the study’s researchers said, “It could also be that when men become more involved as caregivers, their testes shrink. Environmental influences can change biology. We know, for instance, that testosterone levels go down when men become involved fathers.”

Oh sweet justice. It’s been long lamented by mothers that breastfeeding can shrink your boobs and make them look like deflating balloons. Now it appears that fatherhood may shrink testicles. Proof that God is a woman? You decide.

Luckily, the study’s researchers have pointed out that a man’s fatherhood aptitude is predicated on many more things besides what’s in his undies. In other words, whether or not your man will be a good dad shouldn’t be determined by the results of a study of 70 men who got paid to have their balls measured.

3 responses to “Small Balls, Better Dads”

This study could be good news for both men and women.
I know thousands of men could do with the confidence boost. I mean how many rude and embarrassing jokes have been told about smaller sized balls.
What man would admit he had small balls.
Putting the penis aside the size of men’s testicles should have nothing to do with sexual preferences.
If this information was common place, I wonder how many men would rush out to buy those tight hugging jeans they thought they could never fit into.

That study and the resulting news coverage pissed me off. I mean, it’s bad enough that men still face bias that implies that caring for kids is a woman’s job. Now we need to do studies and write headlines that practically scream that being a good dad is emasculating?!?