By Eleanor Bloxham

Maybe you’ve seen the 1963 film Bye Bye Birdie The musical opened on Broadway in 1960. And one ofthe show’s most unforgettable songs begins,“Kids! I don’t know what’s wrong with thesekids today!”At backyard barbecues and holiday gath-erings, the subject of generational differencesis as popular now as it was when the hippieswere rebelling in the 1960s. In fact, in busi-nesses across the U.S., the typecasting of gen-erations has exploded into a pseudo-science.

It’s hard to find a self-respecting marketer
or human resources manager who hasn’t
dived into these waters. And most would be
chagrined to be caught flat-footed without
their own well-articulated views on how the
patterns of behavior of the so-called GI generation, the silents, the boomers, the X’ers and
the millennials must be managed differently,
whether it’s in sales to consumers or keeping
employees engaged.

Of course, identifying patterns in others
in order to simplify human interactions isn’t
new. Historically, in war, countries typecast
each other’s people to make the fighting more
palatable. A book by John Gray, Men are from
Mars, Women are from Venus, is still embraced
today, although at its heart, the book uses
stereotypes to plow its message of how to get
along with another gender.

These simplifications create more harmthan good. Title VII of the Civil Rights Actof 1964 disallowed discrimination in jobadvertising based on gender, as well as othercategories like race, religion and nationalorigin. But even with a legal prohibition inplace, the notion of suitable jobs did not dieeasily. According to LEARN NC, a programof the University of North Carolina Schoolof Education, the December 1, 1968, RaleighNews and Observer broke job ads down by gen-der into “Male Help Wanted,” “Female HelpWanted,” and “Male-Female Help Wanted.”Within those categories, the ads themselvesdiscriminated further: “Wanted, settled whitelady to work nights in rest home,” “Whitewaitress needed,” and “Ladies over 35 withcar.”Today, many people find this overt discrim-ination appalling. Even so, in some quarters,the continuing gender pay gap is not signfor concern. And sizable segments of thepopulation still cling to the gender divisionsin self-help books and consumer messages.

In August, Target came under fire from some
customers when the retailer announced it
would remove gender-biased signs in its toy
and bedding departments.

The blunt instrument of generations, like
gender, remains, for some, a socially acceptable way to identify patterns of behavior. But
new research is showing the old assumptions
about generational differences just don’t hold
water. In her book, Retiring the Generation Gap:
How Employees Young and Old Can Find Common Ground, Jennifer Deal draws on surveys
of 3,200 employees to reach the conclusion
that “Fundamentally people want the same
things, no matter what generation they are
from,” and “All generations have similar values.” She writes that “the so-called generation
gap is, in large part, the result of miscom-munication and misunderstanding, fueled by
common insecurities and the desire for clout.”
Other research supports her conclusions.

Nevertheless, the false views have been hardto shake.

To be sure, all humans share common
traits. At the same time, humans are pattern
makers. So how can we be smarter about our
use of shortcuts? One way we can combat our
inclinations is to choose carefully which ones
we use and how we use them. A technology
evolution, properly managed, could facilitate
our move past crude approximations to handle finer details. Technology is facilitating this
in the delivery of individualized health care,
for example. But fundamentally the answer
lies in choice. We can elect to look at each
other as both humans with similar needs —
and as individuals who change from moment
to moment. Ideally, in navigating human
relationships, professional negotiator Jim
Camp recommends blank-slating, in which
one eliminates expectations and assumptions
in order to really listen and hear the other person. If we do that, we will be more successful
marketers and better managers, without the
need to create false beliefs based on age, race,
gender or any other category we may dream
up to help us cope.

Life is complex. But wrongly simplifying it
makes it both less interesting and less inspiring.

Eleanor Bloxham is the founder and CEO of The Value
Alliance and Corporate Governance Alliance, a board and
executive education, information and advisory firm she founded
in 1999. Eleanor was admitted to Phi Kappa Phi at Louisiana
State University, where she graduated with a B.A. in English. She
also holds an MBA from NYU’s Stern School of Business. Eleanor
is a regular contributor to Fortune and the author of two books,
Value-led Organizations and Economic Value Management:
Applications and Techniques. She may be reached at ebloxham@
thevaluealliance.com.