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The Psychology of Frustration

It’s just one of those days.

I’ve been sitting here at this table, for almost 2 days straight, trying to study for a exam that I’ve gotten worse and worse results on every time I try.

That, my friends, is frustrating.

I’m currently taking a psychology class that discusses the ways of evil, and a portion of which links to the emotion of hate. Interestingly, my professor has drilled into our minds that hate is not an emotion, rather, it is a motive to decrease one’s wellbeing. I like that definition, makes hating seem a lot less…guilty, and a lot more unavoidable.

“oh well, they did this, therefore, it fuelled my motivation to decrease their well being…not my fault.”

That being put aside, another aspect of that course that got me thinking is the concept of frustration. It is defined as anger towards a situation. Has anyone thought about how…well ironically, frustrating that is? The fact that, we cannot change our emotions because it is not within anyone’s hands to change. Unless someone was to completely erase the situation (and even then, it’ll linger in your mind), we have to sit there and deal with it.

Was there a point to this whole rampage of hate, anger and overall negativity? No.

I do, however, feel that it is necessary for people to realize that they cannot change certain feelings, emotions and situations in which these emotions are based on. You have to suck it up, get over it, and move on. You know those celebrities on TV that will constantly tell you “oh, it’ll get better, I promise”. They’re lying. Not because they mean to (because they genuinely believe it), and not because it won’t eventually happen, but because it’s not getting better for the reasons that they believe in; it’s not because the situation has disappeared (especially from your memories) but because you’re going to learn to live with it, deal with it on your own terms, and let go.

So, my advice?

Be frustrated, be angry, but be ready to understand when enough is enough.