So help me, it wasn’t always like this. Once, you could watch without having to endure an IQ test to determine if you’re an idiot.

During Friday’s Game 6 of the ALCS, Houston catcher and ex-Yankee Brian McCann, demoted to ninth in the order, was at bat. There was one out, two on, no score, bottom of the fifth. FOX’s Joe Buck performed his due diligence: “McCann is 0 for his last 20.”

Then, on a 2-2 pitch — the sixth thrown during that at-bat — McCann lined an RBI double to right.

Apparently, FOX felt we should recognize this as the conclusion to an elaborate setup, as John Smoltz narrated a recorded “Pitch-By-Pitch” package concluding with McCann’s double as if copied from a plan. Forgive my cynicism, but it looked more as if that double was produced by McCann’s determined effort, on his 21st try, not to make an out.

In the next half-inning, the Yanks, down 3-0, had two on and two out when Gary Sanchez, on a 3-0 count, did the insufferably impossible: He grounded out on a checked swing.

Smoltz gave that the soft sell, noting that it wasn’t exactly the kind of commitment to swinging or not swinging such a moment demanded, but he first challenged our intellects with, “Sanchez did a good job by not expanding the zone.” Translation: he worked a 3-0 count by not swinging at bad pitches.

The next night, when Sanchez grounded an opposite-field single on a 96-mph pitch, Smoltz made the dubious claim that Sanchez hit it exactly where he tried to hit it.

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Sanchez was lucky. Tim McCarver, ex-catcher, is no longer FOX’s lead analyst. In his Barney Fife, Memphis twang, McCarver several times would have piped, “What in the world is he thinking?”

Sanchez seemed to have been on an all-season audition to become a DH. As a catcher, he had it backwards, trying to catch pitches he should have blocked, blocking throws to home he should have caught.

Three times in the ALCS, runners from second scored after Sanchez failed to make a catchable catch on a play at home — all while inexplicably still wearing his mask to limit his view.

On the other hand, in the fifth inning of Game 7, the Astros, up 1-0, nailed a runner from third at the plate because McCann ripped off his mask and made a sensational catch and tag. Such inescapable differences either escaped Smoltz or he ignored them.

More than Sanchez, Smoltz tested the nerves. His assessment that Aaron Judge’s HR-saving catch Saturday was among the “greatest Game 7 catches” — it was a very good catch of a ball Judge reasonably should have caught or at least kept in play — was heard as transparent hype.

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Smoltz also attached “great” to second baseman Jose Altuve’s throw-out of Chase Headley at first, likely because Altuve fielded the grounder in short right, as per the shift. How great? It might’ve been scored an error had first baseman Yuli Gurriel not scooped Altuve’s low throw.

Saturday, Astros up, 4-0, Houston starter Charlie Morton was pulled after five innings of two-hit, five-strikeout, 54-pitch domination. That once would have been written and read as a lie. Buck said Morton had been “Outstanding!”

Then why was he pulled? Why was manager A.J. Hinch, again, so eager to toss a winning hand? Did Buck and Smoltz not think that crazy?

For bonus stupidity, FOX, two innings after Judge’s catch, posted word that his “Route Efficiency [was] 94.3%.” Who knew? Given that he caught the ball we figured his route efficiency was 100 percent.

So help me, it wasn’t always like this.

No relish for Brooklyn hot dog

The end of Friday’s Magic-Nets on YES was rough on the senses.

First there was the return of the endless ending, the final 1:58 took nearly 11 minutes to complete.

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Then there was the Nets’ self-anointed 21-year-old star, D’Angelo Russell, scoring in the final moments of a close game while being fouled. Russell then paraded around pointing to an imaginary watch on his wrist to indicate this is “My time!”

Unfortunately, a replay and announcers Ian Eagle and Sarah Kustok unconvincingly pandered to Russell’s conspicuous, all-about-me immodesty when both more likely felt Russell looked like a jerk — especially after missing the free throw.

Finally, with 13 seconds left, Orlando had the ball, down three, when Eagle and Kustok alertly noted that it might soon be time for the Nets to give a foul, rather than allow the Magic to tie with a 3. But Eagle said that’s not coach Kenny Atkinson’s “philosophy.”

It’s not a philosophy, it’s a smart strategy. In the end, the Nets got away with allowing the Magic an open 3 to tie, the kind made roughly 33 percent of the time, rather than force them to make the first free throw, miss the second, rebound then score — witnessed, at most, once in a lifetime.

A football Spiel’ worth listening to

FOX’s Chris Spielman smartly and immediately recognized a common, significant deficiency among new-age ballplayers on Sunday: Failure to recognize circumstances. On third-and-19, the Jets’ Matt Forte ran for 20 yards, fully enabled by Miami DT Jordan Phillips’ missed “tackle” designed to strip Forte of the ball rather than tackle him. Instead of punting, the Jets scored on that possession to lead, 14-7.

Football experts continue to lean heavily on stats that can’t support their weight. Saturday, Purdue crushed Rutgers in the “biggies” — 25-8 in first downs, 474-217 in yardage, 32:06-27:54 in time of possession. RU won, 14-12.

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I did dirt here to WFAN’s Steve Somers, Friday, writing that he mocked CC Sabathia’s alcoholism by twinning CC with AA. What Somers quipped was that in Game 3 of the ALCS CC had his AA game. I was dead wrong; I apologize.

The family of John Andariese, who passed in March, will receive Fordham’s Johnny Bach Award at the school’s Tip-Off Dinner, Oct. 30, at the Water Club. Marv Albert and Adam Silver are expected to speak. Bach coached “Johnny Hoops” at Fordham, 1956-60.

With TV’s relentless, brainless aid, our sports remain doomed: Although there were five TDs and one huge turnover in the first half of Miami-Jets, all of FOX’s chosen “highlights” at the half’s close and just before the third quarter’s start — highlights that might’ve been used to explain the game to that point — were of post-play acts of self-affection.

No comprende: Game 7 graphic on FOX provided info on how to watch FOX’s Spanish-language version. The graphic was in English.