Category Archives: Advice

I was in a car crash 3 days ago and am very thankful to be alive. My car is a write off but I escaped without a scratch; with only some pain in the neck and shoulders. During the accident, I remembered thinking that my time is up and was so relieved when I realised it wasn’t. I’m still in shock but trying my best to learn from this incident. Trying to remind myself what is important and to priotise that.

A large truck hit my car and it spun across 3 lanes of highway and finally stopped when it hit the middle, dividing concrete barrier. I’m glad the car was well-built as it protected me but it was badly damaged and can’t be repaired. I’m very fortunate to be alive because it was rush hour and I could have hit other vehicles as the car was spinning. In fact when the car stopped spinning, I was facing oncoming traffic and a lorry who managed to stop one foot away from smashing into me.

Since then, I’ve tried to resume my normal routine as if nothing had happened. But the thoughts of that moment is often present. I have no visible injuries but desperately want to speak to someone about it. Everyone who heard about the accident thinks I’m fine because I have no injuries. H doesn’t know how to deal with it so pretends that all is fine. His advice to me is, focus on being grateful that I’m alive. I want to shout back at him, ‘but I could have died!’ Instead I withdraw and become silent.

I don’t blame him at all. I don’t expect him to understand what I’m going through and this is something I have to deal with. I want this incident to mean something and be the catalyst for a better life.

This is my wish for you, that you’re living the life you want and you’re at peace with yourself and with your family. Life is not guaranteed so every day is a chance to be fulfilled.

“I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.”-Mother Teresa

“What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life – to strengthen each other in all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent, unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting.”

-George Elliot

“Common courtesy plays a big role in happy marriages. People who are permanently married are polite to one another. They don’t want to hurt one another’s feelings, and they don’t try to make the other one feel humiliated. People who are married for life are extremely kind to one another.”

If you’re buying off-plan, go and check out other schemes that the developer has built, and talk to the residents there.

Before buying a brand new place, consider longevity. If there’s not a lot of storage and you’re about to get married and start a family, perhaps think about buying a second-hand property you can do up and extend.

Check that your home will come with a building warranty (usually for 10 years).

Bear in mind that the show home will look bigger than it really is: tricks of the trade include putting smaller beds in the bedroom, and removing doors from hinges.

On a new development, buy early for the best position. The corner flat on the top floor will have the most light, and as you’re above everyone else, it’s unlikely to be noisy.

Check the local authority planning department website for future development plans in the area. A big, new building next door will spoil your river view.

Get as many extra freebies as you can: carpets, kitchen and bathroom appliances, garden landscaping.

Even better, get the developers to pay your stamp duty, or solicitors’ fees, or put down half your deposit. Some will give you cashback when you buy.

Buy a place and rent it back to the developer. They can use it as a show flat or offices. You’ll need a place to stay in the meantime, though.

Haggle over the price of your home, and the specifications. You can always be cheeky and try to get your kitchen, bathrooms and some appliances upgraded. It’s always worth asking, to see what you can get.

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”― Marilyn Monroe

“I never loved another person the way I loved myself.”― Mae West

“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life, but define yourself.”― Harvey Fierstein

“The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself.”― Michel de Montaigne, The Complete Essays

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”― Siddhārtha Gautama

“Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it. ”― M. Scott Peck

“When you’re different, sometimes you don’t see the millions of people who accept you for what you are. All you notice is the person who doesn’t.”― Jodi Picoult, Change of Heart

“As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are – what others say is irrelevant.”― Nic Sheff

“The worst loneliness is to not be comfortable with yourself.”― Mark Twain

“Why should we worry about what others think of us, do we have more confidence in their opinions than we do our own?”― Brigham Young

“I care for myself. The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.”― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

“I don’t entirely approve of some of the things I have done, or am, or have been. But I’m me. God knows, I’m me.”― Elizabeth Taylor

“That’s what real love amounts to – letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending – performing. You get to love your pretence. It’s true, we’re locked in an image, an act – and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image, they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And if you try to remind them, they hate you for it, they feel like you’re trying to steal their most precious possession.”― Jim Morrison

“I used to be self conscious about my height, but then I thought, f*** that, I’m Harry Potter.”― Daniel Radcliffe

“There is no magic cure, no making it all go away forever. There are only small steps upward; an easier day, an unexpected laugh, a mirror that doesn’t matter anymore.”― Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls

“Don’t try to fix me, I’m not broken…”― Evanescence

“The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone.”― Ayn Rand, The Virtue of Selfishness

“You’re always with yourself, so you might as well enjoy the company.”― Diane Von Furstenberg

“I believe with all my heart that the cliches are true, that we are our own best friends and best company, and that if you’re not right for yourself, it’s impossible to be right for anyone.”― Rachel Machacek, The Science of Single: One Woman’s Grand Experiment in Modern Dating, Creating Chemistry, and Finding Love

“Everything that happens to you is a reflection of what you believe about yourself. We cannot outperform our level of self-esteem. We cannot draw to ourselves more than we think we are worth.”― Iyanla Vanzant

“Don’t belittle yourself. Be BIG yourself.”― Corita Kent

“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.”― Norman Vincent Peale

“Dare to love yourself as if you were a rainbow with gold at both ends.” ― Aberjhani, The River of Winged Dreams

“How would your life be different if…You stopped allowing other people to dilute or poison your day with their words or opinions? Let today be the day…You stand strong in the truth of your beauty and journey through your day without attachment to the validation of others”― Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free