No Longer Frum

After my journey of uncertainty, undecidedness, and self dilemma of either staying in my community or moving out... I decided that I should most definitely NOT stay Frum. The eradication and repudiation of all that I was taught to be holy, has allowed me to be on the road toward happiness and productivity.
The secular world isn’t as evil as frum people make to be and is certainly less evil then the frum world itself.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

I'm visit my parent house, I see a card on the floor, so I bend down to pick it up. It's not a card it's a small picture of the Rebbe. I automatically draw the to my mouth to kiss is before I put away.....

I jerk back in amused thoughtfulness when I realized what I was about to do. I smile and think to myself, "I guess my friend was right".

Monday, April 12, 2010

In a moment of clarity I realized that because I gave it all in the frum world I am so afraid to really go all the way for anything ells. The effort for college is closer to half ass attempt. I am totally burned out.

I assume that this is felt more by ppl who “frayed out” a little later in life.

Ok I need therapy- but I wanted to share it with you chevreh first....

Thursday, March 25, 2010

So these girls at school were quoting the bible about Pesach how if you eat Chometz you get kures. Now I'm conflicted to perhaps keep Pesach (and kick off a diet), or take this opportunity to get "cut off".

Monday, March 22, 2010

Oy usually I am very supportive of people no matter what general direction they decide to go.

This morning while talking to some Jewish kid in college, I gave such a "vish up" about this whole bull shit concept of freedom on Pesach, and how real freedom is doing and eating whatever the hell you want on Pesach. He got so insulted. I didn't realize that he was frum (he was wearing a huddy).

I think I said sorry to him, but I now have to tshuvah between me and the aibishter.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

I decided to finally put my past behind me and only look to the future. It's the best decision anyone can make. I literally imagined turning around in a long tunnel away from the past and in towards the future.