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It Happened to Me: I Was Trapped in a Rush Horde and Initiated Into a Sorority

On a balmy Sunday, I was supposed to be walking home to meet my visiting sister, Violet, who had flown all the way from Sacramento, California to meet with me. Instead, I was trapped in a rush horde heading into the Alpha Xi Delta house on Euclid Avenue. I’ve been here ever since.

After insisting to all my (new) sisters that I needed to leave to go home to meet my real sister for lunch, I was offered a bid. For some reason, my refusal to take it and continued insistence that I really needed to leave were interpreted as funny running gags. I’ve now been deemed “the joker” of AZD. Every time I insist I need to get home to let my sister into my apartment, they respond with things like “You’re already home!” or “We are your sisters now.” What was once a funny and annoying misunderstanding has blossomed into something more: a full-blown nightmare.

I’m writing this article to remind everyone that this could happen to anyone. The only way to stay safe is to avoid rush hordes and be constantly vigilant. Next rush weekend, stay inside, lock your doors, and keep your shades closed. I haven’t give up hope yet. I’ve been collecting sorority themed shirts and shirts from fraternity events and have been secretly making a rope ladder with which to propel myself to freedom. I’ll make my escape on the next full moon, when all my sisters are performing our monthly sacrificial blood ritual.

Despite my nightmare, I’ve still made friends, which I will hold dear to me for a lifetime. Although I will miss these friends, I really need to get home. My sister is still waiting for me.