The First Lord’s Song

Something for the weekend. The First Lord’s Song from Gilbert& Sullivan’s HMS Pinafore, a satirical look at how political hacks filled important positions they were completely unsuited for. With around 40% of Congresscritters members of the legal profession, and I believe some eight cabinet level officers, the song remains topical.

When I was a lad I served a termAs office boy to an attorney’s firmI cleaned the windows and I swept the floorAnd I polished up the handle of the big front doorHe polished up the handle of the big front doorI polished up that handle so carefullyThat now I am the Ruler of the Queen’s NavyHe polished up that handle so carefullyThat now he is the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy

As office boy I made such a markThat they gave me the post of a junior clerkI served the writs with a smile so blandAnd I copied all the letters in a big round handHe copied all the letters in a big round handI copied all the letters in a hand so freeThat now I am the Ruler of the Queen’s NavyHe copied all the letters in a hand so freeThat now he is the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy

In serving writs I made such a nameThat an articled clerk I soon becameI wore clean collars and a brand-new suitFor the Pass Examination at the InstituteFor the Pass Examination at the InstituteAnd that Pass Examination did so well for meThat now I am the Ruler of the Queen’s NavyThat Pass Examination did so well for heThat now he is the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy

Of legal knowledge I acquired such a gripThat they took me into the partnershipAnd that junior partnership I weenWas the only ship that I ever had seenWas the only ship that he ever had seenBut that kind of ship so suited meThat now I am the Ruler of the Queen’s NavyBut that kind of ship so suited heThat now he is the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy

I grew so rich that I was sentBy a pocket borough into ParliamentI always voted at my party’s callAnd I never thought of thinking for myself at allNo, he never thought of thinking for himself at allI thought so little, they rewarded meBy making me the Ruler of the Queen’s NavyHe thought so little, they rewarded heBy making him the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy

Now, landsmen all, whoever you may beIf you want to rise to the top of the treeIf your soul isn’t fettered to an office stoolBe careful to be guided by this golden ruleBe careful to be guided by this golden ruleStick close to your desks and never go to seaAnd you all may be Rulers of the Queen’s NavyStick close to your desks and never go to seaAnd you all may be Rulers of the Queen’s Navy

Perhaps the world would be better if attorneys would simply stick to their own profession, although often that is not very edifying either:

Several family car trips were made MUCH better by my mom having a compilation tape for these folks, and being deaf enough to really blast it.
(Also: Ride of the Valkyries is outstanding cruising music; hopefully we upgrade the minivan before our next really long drive, so I can use my “Massive Classics” CD.)

Really love G & S and the Savoy Operas – all had a comment to make on the society of that day, but as you say, still very relevant today.
“Stick close to your desk and never go to sea……..” speaks volumes of the burgeoning bureaucracies in governments today – often instigated by socialist style govts – people who have been seat -polishers all their lives but making crucial life decisions that impact negatively on society at large.

In my days at Sacred Heart in the 50’s there was an annual production of one of the Gilbert & Sullivan operas. When I was a boy soprano I acted in “Pirates of Penzance” and “The Mikado”.
I missed “HMS Pinafore” and “The Gondoliers” when my voice broke and took me a year or more for my tenor voice to develop.
Great selection Don.

Thank you Don. When you consider that these were light operas for the masses in the 19th century, the wit and the sharp observations on society contained within them are amazing. Apparently in those days entertainers did not assume that they had to appeal to the lowest common denominator to draw an audience.

“Stick close to your desks and never go to sea” is one thing for some one who is appointed First Sea Lord or Secretary of the Navy. But when I see headlines of ship’s captains getting fired in the NAVY TIMES I wonder how many Naval Line Officers follow that advice.

I know we had a certain problem with Army Officers who hated troop duty and felt the way to get ahead was to avoid itl They usually got there come uppance before they got a star but not always.