Entries in New York City
(15)

A pigeon flew into my head this morning. I haven't told anyone yet. It was like someone dropped a small stack of newspapers onto my head from above. It made a thud. I looked up and a pigeon flew away. No one else saw it. I don't mean that it flew into my head, like it's still in there. This isn't magic realism. This is something that happened, and I didn't want the day to go by without mentioning it to someone. Is it good luck? Bad luck? Or do we live in a morally neutral universe where objects occasionally bump into each other at random, like a cosmic pinball machine with no score being kept and possibly not even a player? Anyway, I didn't want to get into all that. I just wanted to note that a pigeon flew into my head this morning.

Just want to congratulate everyone for the record rainfall in New York City yesterday. Awesome job letting the rain fall on us, guys! Sure, we complained, but did anyone try to stop the rain? No! That's what makes this city so great - we know how to receive historic precipitation and go about our lives as New Yorkers. Special shout-out to the folks selling cheap umbrellas on the street. Sure, they are worthless pieces of crap. But you guys inspired us all to accumulate more water from the sky on a particular date, which we can all be proud of. Over 2" on 1/18/15. In New York City, baby!

Oh, change machine at the laundromat – you rejected 7 out of 8 dollar bills in my wallet. Could it be that your standards are a little too high? It’s like you don’t really want to give out change. Are you afraid to give? Afraid of change? It’s time to step up and “be the change machine you want to see in the world.” Or else focus on what you really like to do – inspecting and rejecting currency – but no one wants a machine to do that. If you wanna stay up there on the wall, you better “take a look at yourself and make that change!” I’m glad we had this talk, change machine. I believe you can be an agent of change! As the song says, “Turn and face the strange…”

As part of the 3rd Annual NY Funny Song Fest, produced by the amazing Jessica Delfino, I'll be co-hosting and performing in Hooklyn: Funny Songs from & about Brooklyn on Sat, May 31, 8:30 pm at People's Republic of Brooklyn (247 Smith St). GET TIX ($10)!($12 at the door)

I'll also be on the bill at 50 Funny Songs on Fri, May 30, 7 pm at Botanic Lab (86 Orchard St, NYC) -- an exciting and sure to be sold-out night of the fest. GET TIX ($10)!($12 at the door)