A poem written by a poetess of an online poetry workshop I’m registered in. It was #6 in the top 100 Humorous category last year. I just loved it and asked the permission of my friend Connie Minshew aka shakysphere to publish it on my blog. I know you will like it, enjoy:

The Day before School Starts

to parents of many children

‘Twas the day before school starts, when all through the houseThe children were quarreling over the mouse!“It’s not FAIR!”, yelled Ben, “Bea has played for an hour!”“I’m in the middle of a GAME!”, whined she, with a glower.

My wife and I bristled, and I hopped out of bed,While all thoughts of intimacy popped out of our heads.For my wife in her teddy, and I in my chapsHad just settled down for a mid-afternoon “nap”.

Then out on the lawn, there arose such a clatter,I threw on my robe to see what was the matter.Away to the window, I flew like a flash,Raised up the mini-blinds, and threw up the sash.

Our children played baseball, and our youngest batterHad hit a “homer”; The neighbor’s pane shattered!Then, what to my worried eyes should appear,But my neighbor, and an officer bringing up the rear.

“You MUST supervise those children, and payFor Mr. Smith’s window with a check…today!”More rapid than greyhounds, and chattering like birds,They blamed the damage on each other, with echoing words.

“It was Bea!” “It was Russ!” “It was Daryl and Ken,And Janet, and David, and Beverly, and Ben!”“To your rooms, Everyone! To your rooms, and be quiet!Now, dash away! Get upstairs, and don’t riot!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,So into the house, up the stairs they all flew,Yelling, “It wasn’t ME! Why punish me, too?”

Later, back in my bedroom, I heard on the wallThe bumping and bouncing of a large basketball.“Now, stop that!”, I yelled, “We MUST have a ‘nap’!”I took off my robe, and stood proud in my chaps.

“We’re finally alone.”, I whispered. “It’s you I adore.”My wife stirred slightly, and exhaled a soft snore.I awakened her gently, rolled her onto her back,And, play-acting a vampire, made ready to “attack”!

Her eyes-how they twinkled! Her dimples how merry!Her cheeks were like roses, her lips like a cherry!Her little white teddy was drawn up in a bow,And, oh my gosh…how I wanted her so!

Just then, from downstairs came a crash!(David and Ben had been taking out trash.)I put on my robe; My wife turned, with a sigh.Surely, she KNEW I’d be back, by-and-by.

“Okay, WHO’S the culprit? What happened?”, said I.“It was HIS fault!”, said David. “He had to tryTo fling all the garbage from the porch to the can!”(It busted, and now, it’s all over the van

Which I had just washed, then parked in the drive.)“If you disturb us once more…you kids won’t survive!”And, shaking my fist at them, for good measure.I started upstairs, to get back to my “treasure”.

I tried the door, but it was now locked.Seems my sweet wife’s tender desires were blocked.But I heard her exclaim, jumping back into bed,“Go downstairs! Watch TV! Or…DROP DEAD!”

by shakysphere

Author’s Comments:“I think having several children is God’s way of assuring that families don’t get TOO large…sort of a “built-in birth-control”! Lol! (MY SINCEREST APOLOGIES TO CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE, author of “The Night Before Christmas!) God bless all who read!”

I did not want to talk about the illusive victory that most Arab and Islamic countries are assuming for Hizbullah, but one does not have any choice with this public who is so desperate for victory while thousands of Lebanese are homeless and humiliated, begging other nations for help.Talking about dignity? Is this the dignity we want for our beloved Lebanon?Surfing the Net and especially in some Israeli sites, I see a different note all together. Most are not happy with this war, declaring their defeat and scrutinizing their Prime Minister and all the responsible parties for this grave loss. They’re constantly analyzing all the ins and outs of this war (or should I say the first phase of it) for a more victorious reencounter, although their loss was not even a fraction to our loss. Why is that? Does this really give an indication of who won the jackpot?It would be naive to think so; the difference between us and them is that they have something called self criticism that unfortunately we Arabs lack. If we had half of what they have we wouldn’t have been in this pathetic situation today.Nasrullah can assume victory; the war calculations of victory and defeat are proportional to the goal achieved. And it is obvious that Nasrullah achieved this goal in the first round for Iran who is the main player in this war against USA. But for the public to cheer the victory! This is the real puzzle.I said Iran is the main player and I meant it; Iran’s war against the west ideology is no secret and it is decades long since Alkhumaini revolution. Iran’s continuous struggle for power verses that of US democratization of the region is the main cause of this chaos we are in. The war in Lebanon was just the first round; the whole region is on the brink of the big war, and thanks to Iran for preparing the embers of sectarianism in the Middle East. Who will win this war in the end is the question that we need to ponder on; The Islamization of all our region, or democracy?The way I see it, Islamization is winning when the public is so hungry to win against the west on fake slogans against a common enemy. The enemy is right within, while we look far away. May be we need the bang on the head just like those thousand Iranians who are stranded away from their land and the ones living on rations in their own country while their rulers send millions of dollars to other nations for the sake of spreading it’s power.

I’ve been tagged by NewMe , and I think now I have the responsibility to respond. But before doing that I wanted to mention something first. When I read her post and knew about a blogger friend who left the blog-o-sphere for sometime and had returned, unconsciously; my hand clicked on the address of this blogger; Aba Alhakam Ibn Hisham but unfortunately it was not the blogger she was referring to. But I hope as she was reunited with her friend, someday Aba Elhakam will be back to give blog-o-sphere the liveliness it used to have, at least to me.Anyhow; let’s start the show (I tried to translate as much as I could):

1- Are you happy with your blog layout as well as posts?

So far I am, although I’m not very happy with blogspot for not having the option to categorize, I would have preferred to have more organization in my blog. Nevertheless; blogspot has promised this option in its Beta version so I’m waiting and anticipating.

2- Does your immediate family know about your blog? Yes they do, some also pass by at times and leave a comment, but not regularly.

3- Do you find it embarrassing to tell a friend about your blog?

Not at all, actually I encouraged many friends to start their own, some of them started but did not continue and others are now dedicated bloggers.

4- Do you consider blogging a private matter? Once the writing is made public, then it’s not a private matter anymore. Nevertheless; what I write at times is a private matter and I have the choice to elaborate on it or keep it vague.

5- Did blogging positively affect your thoughts?

Oh yes in many ways, it took me away from the shell I had engulfed myself in, away from society for a long period of time when I realized that there were others who shared my thought and that I was not alone.

6- Do you visit the ones who usually visit you? Or do you open yourself to a bigger sphere in the Net? At the beginning; there were only a handful of Kuwaiti bloggers, and one visit to Kuwaiti blog aggregator was enough to visit almost all Kuwaiti blogs, and through Kuwaiti blogs I was introduced to other bloggers from the Gulf area. But with time the number got bigger and I hardly have time to visit all, so I started my own links and these are the people who I usually visit, but when I have time, I still click on Kuwaiti blog aggregator to find out what’s new. All this besides the others who visit my blog, I do usually peak on the new comers, only to find out what type of mentality they have, and when I like what I read, I put them on my favorite list, then add a link to them when I have time.

7- Is the number of visitors important to you? Or you care more for your commentators?

The number of visitors is not important unless this visitor is a constant guest even if he/she does not leave a comment, because for some reason or another, this visitor shies out to do so, but his/her constant visit always leave a big smile on my face. But off course I appreciate my commentators more (not the spammers though).

8- Did you try to imagine your commentator’s physical appearance?

Actually; my mind did shape the bloggers with what they wrote. And I saw them all beautiful in my mind’s eye. But when I met some during the orange movement, I realized that they were much more beautiful than the picture my mind made of them, and there was no need to do much talking since they were already familiar to my mind, we just acted as best friends do, and that was really a nice experience. And another thing; I also noticed that the picture each blogger uses for his/her profile has a big similarity to the physical look.

9- Did you find a real benefit from blogging?

Oh yes, the biggest benefit was the orange movement that I wouldn’t have participated in without blogging. It also helped me to see my shortcoming especially in poetry which was the main reason that started me in this sphere. It’s not what the commentators said about my poems that gave me this indication, it’s what they did not say.

10- Do you feel that the blog-o-sphere is an isolated entity from the actions in the world around you?

In the contrary; I feel communicating with others through blogging zoomed the actions around me and made me more aware of the world and different human inputs towards these actions. We bloggers may have similar opinions to certain issues and different opinions on other issues, yet respect and cyber friendship is what unite us.

11- Does a commentator’s criticism bother you, or do you think that criticism is a healthy debate?

Actually, it all depends on the type of criticism. Constructive criticism never bothers me, on the contrary; it might make a shift in my original thoughts. Yet; criticizing for the sake of criticism does.

12- Do you have paranoia toward some political blogs and do you try to avoid them? Were you shocked that some bloggers were arrested?

No, I have no fear of politics or political blogs, as a matter of fact as much as I try to avoid politics, not because of fear, but because of the headache it contains, I find myself immersed in politics, and some of my posts clearly show that. As for the second part of the question; yes, I have heard of some who were arrested, but not in Kuwait. Nevertheless those incidents left me numb and ill at ease because I believe that every one has the right to speak his mind.13- Have you ever thought about your blog’s fate after your death?

Yes, many times. And I’m glad I started it, because people die, but the written word never dies.

14- What is the song that you’d like to have it linked to your blog?

My mood changes all the time, and that’s why I do not link my blog to any song. But for now, I mean the mood I’m in right now, the song posted below is the one. Enjoy.

Ok, now I have to tag five bloggers, and since this post is mostly about experiences in blogging, I chose five oldies, not in age but in blogging, and here it goes: