Saturday, May 11, 2013

I feel on certain days that I go through the day-to-day motions of motherhood.

I get up, help get the children ready in the morning, grab a quick shower, go to work, check in with P three or four times a day, then rush home, make dinner, hang out with the kids, baths, reading, bed. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Today, my son got his first haircut and went from Davey Jones form up above, to looking like a bona fide little boy. And it just hits me like a ton of bricks that these babies grow up and will be little children who will be teenagers who will then be adults. It happens just as quickly as all the mothers before me have said (and probably will until the end of time).

For this Mother's Day, I wish time to stand still, to reflect on my journey to this place, to remember the way all my children first felt in my arms---starting with my precious Ronan. It is really such a powerful thing when a doctor hands you a baby that has been inside of you, rolling around, making you feel powerful and fragile all at the same time. May my children always know that I loved them the second I learned of them, and that I worried 24/7 the entire time they were in me, talking that silent language that crossed mom's brain to the placenta. Please come home to me---please be safe in there. Please know how many people want to meet you and see your smile.

Ronan made me a mother 5 years ago. My other children have the mother he molded me into. That is his legacy for his siblings. And for him and them, I am grateful that I am a mother....