Friday, October 3, 2014

How did he get in? The same way every other illegal alien gets here: he just showed up at the door with his pathogens. No questions asked. Come on in!

Illegal aliens saying “thanks for the hospitality” in Esperanto – the universal language

And why, you ask yourself, do people still believe what they are told by “officials” who always seem to have one or more ulterior motives in play? Give up? Me too. And I don’t know what more I can do; I’ve tried to instill as much cynicism as possible in order to ensure the survival of the human race and still, to quote Lilly, “I can’t keep up.” People in the general population are just hell-bent on remaining optimists even if that means avoiding and ignoring all evidence indicating we’re marching towards the end of civilization as we know it.

In other news, I believe it was the Russians who first turned Jen Psaki into a verb, i.e. “psaking” (pronounced, “piss-sacking”) – defined as saying something so stupid it deserved it’s own term.

Demonstrating admirably why she deserved this honor, one simply must watch Megyn Kelly’s interview with Jen last night. As you do, remind yourself: this is the State Department’s head spokesmouth; and Harfie is only our #2 spoks.

How bad was it? This bad…

No matter what Kelly asked, poor Jen was reduced to responding with her deer in the headlight look followed quickly by rapid robotic blinking and random repetitive hand motions while simultaneously issuing heartfelt denials and talking points.

Never once wiping that blank slate Spoks-smile off her face:

A Fox with the Spoks

That’s quite a feat - psaking herself. Talk about a JV.

So, let’s sum up all the news you’re allowed to know this week:

Ebola; not a threat. Do not panic.

ISIS; not a threat. Do not panic.

Beheading in Oaklahoma; not a threat. Do not panic.

Your bank accounts hacked; not a threat. Do not panic. (h/t JPMorgan-Chase)

Oh yes, we are in the very best of hands.

So I think perhaps I should host a Motus Twilight Nocturne Lounge night this evening. Due to a previous commitment neither Little Mo or I will be able to stay around very long after we officially open the virtual bar for virtual happy hour. So if you promise to behave I promise to provide some smooth jazz, all the virtual cocktails you can handle and a salon to discuss this week’s heavy incoming artillery.

The shutters will be opened promptly at 5:00 PM EDT and announced with a new post and thread, and remain open until the street sweeper comes through in the morning. If I’m not there right away, go ahead without me.