"Very well, sweetie, but be aware the Pole Dancing thing while now socially acceptable does not pay as much."

Next day she's at the bookstore strangling some barely above minimum wage clerk under the poster for "Master Snickup's CLoak part 2"....(My Mom bought Master Snickup's Cloak when I was in grade school and got to the gory parts before realizing it was a sick parody...!)

The "swallowed whole" part is one of the more recent versions. Some far older versions don't mention her being swallowed whole just that grandma (and Red in some versions)were eaten before the hunter/woodsman/woodcutter arrived