*** I am very sorry for the format of this posting. I cannt seem to fix it ***

Several weeks ago I was searching my mind for a topic to “blog” about. I was just trying to find something going on in my world that I wanted to remember “some day” – I was looking for something to capture that might entertain you at the same time that I was writing in my life’s journal . . . . my blog remained as empty as the thoughts that were passing through my head.

I sent a Tweet out asking folks for something to “blog” about and @Hurricanes4life reminded me that it was always good to write about music / songs …. I agree! I put the mind to work trying to think about songs to write about . . . I thought . . . I listened . . . I thought . . . I listened . . . nothing really hit me –

Couple of days ago I sent a message to an old friend that seems to appreciate music and asked – “Musically speaking, where are you these days”.

Finally, my mind caught up to the music of the moment and I found something to write about that is related to music and to me. Ramble On reminded me that many many many years ago I sort of planned my funeral. Actually, it was listening to Led Zeppling that reminded me of my “plans”.

Now lets get this straight – I am not thinking about death. I am not thinking about being dead. I am not thinking about having a funeral. I am just remembering that at one point in my life I sat down and thought about it and even planned the 3 songs that I wanted to be played there. And now, I feel like remembering those plans from years ago and hopefully entertaining you in the meantime.

Of course there is some symbolism in these songs and in the order that they were to be played. If the symbolism is not clear after you have read my blog , read the lyrics, and listened to the songs, then just know that it IS clear in my mind . . . . and that is the most important thing.

Rusty Ruus introduced me to this song. He said that I would appreciate it more if I sat with my back against the speaker, closed my eyes, and just felt the song . . . I did as he recommended. (We were at the apartment off of Franklin Road . . . . no need to say more) –

I remember well that first encounter with No Quarter – I remember all of the places that my mind rushed off to when I listened to these words: “Walking side by side with death . . . The devil mocks their every step . . . . ” If there were ever a period in my life that death might have been just around the corner it was probably back in those days. Those days were powerful. They were soul and character building days. There were some days mixed in that I hope I never forget and some days that I wished I couldnt remember.

Those days represent the beginning of the “battle” that became my life. There is nothing more special about the “battle” that became (still is) my life then the “battle” that is in your life! We all have things to battle against and for.

Oh the “conflict” that is developing in the first part of this song. It is thick – as thick as the conflicts that exsist in life. . . .

“The Prince of Peace embraced the gloom and walked the night alone” …. no matter how close any of us are with our spouses, our kids, or are family – I bet that we all feel as if we walk the night alone …….

“The apples of the valley hold the seeds of happiness” . . . . How many times have you ….. (I mean, I) found the apple that holds the seeds of happiness . . . . .

“The apples turn to brown and black” . . . . Still want those seeds?

“Oh well, the night is long, the beads of time pass slow ….. Tired eyes on the sunrise, waiting for the eastern glow” . . . . That is exactly right! Oh well! What are you going to do about it? ? ? …. watch the sunrise …. wait for that glow!

“At last the sun is shining, the clouds of blue roll by with flames from the dragon of darkness, the sunlight blinds his eyes” . . . . And that is my point! That is exactly what it is about. At last … the sun will shine! There will be blue clouds! And that bright light will destory the darkness … the bad …. and at last the seeds of happiness ……

This song holds the least amount of symbolism – The fact that California has always been that “magical” place – warm place – fun place – that place were folks go to chace dreams . . . . to find dreams . . . seems like the perfect place to be when being here is over.

I like knowing that California awaits me – I know it does – and for now I will keep “Tellin’ myself it’s not as hard, hard, hard as it seems”

I am not sure that I still have funeral plans. I mean, the death rate is still at 100% so I am going to die some day . . . . but I think I will leave the plans for that up to others. See, this was a NOT SO MORBID POSTING.

2 Responses to A not so morbid posting – but it sure seems that way.

one common exercise in writers groups is to write one’s own obituary. I think it is common that we don’t like to talk about ourselves in plain language (thus we write about ourselves wearing other people’s skin) so it is HARD to write that obit. I don’t think I’ve ever accomplished it. However, if we want people to remember us as we would like to be remembered it might behoove each of us to do so.

Nahhhh – let ’em remember me as THEY remember me. I won’t care one way or another, will I? 🙂