Monday, January 28, 2008

Every day is bringing me something new. I have surrounded myself with people that have similar interests and are familiar with many curve balls that can come your way in life. Through this process I am finding so much of me that has either been lost for some time or parts I didn't know even existed. There are obviously parts of me that I am very familiar with, both the kinds I am greatly proud of and yes even those that I could certainly do without. But in the midst of this time, I am learning so much more then I ever thought possible. I begin each day with such great relief ~ relief because of an enlightenment that becomes more and more clear each day. You know the metaphorical "light bulb" - well it clicks on at certain points for me throughout the day.

Today I attended another group that is hugely supportive to me. I sat in a room with about 50 men and women and listened to their stories and their thoughts. The discussion surrounded an excerpt from a book about healing; it talked of dreams lost, opportunities taken away, survival. As I watched the heads nodding and each individual responding to what they were hearing in different fashion, I noticed I felt perfectly comfortable in what others would say was a room of strangers. I understood - they understood. They have given me great gut to move in a direction that will only improve and empower my life and focus.

This has been the most difficult process in my life - but just as surely as the days I delivered the most incredible gifts in my life, I am singing the Lord's praises in it. I know that there is reason and movement and I know that I am not alone. There are little miracles and blessings every day and I will raise a thank you each morning for all that will take place in that day and will cast the same thank you to the heaven's as my head hits the pillow.