70. ‘Money is My True Desire’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a relationship with money itself as my ultimate desire, love and wish in my reality wherein I have linked the word ‘Money’ to all that which I can Buy, consume and own in order to create a positive experience within me, which I have called ‘empowerment’ linked to a state of ‘happiness’/ success/ fulfillment and joy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to learn that life is all about getting to this ultimate happiness and success within the society, which is tacitly implying having a lot of money in order to buy a lot of things that can denote that ‘I have money, I am powerful, I am happy, I am fulfilled, I can have everything I want’ – without realizing that I was trained to think this way when linking money as an added-value onto who I am as a human being that is Life in itself already – not realizing that Life is the one and only True-Value in existence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my value/wealth as money to others’ wealth/money, and constantly see ‘where I stand’ in relation to other’s money/ wealth, which implies that I can only consider myself as being ‘successful’ if I see myself having More things, owning, continually being able to buy everything that I want as a means to create a positive experience within me, as a sense of empowerment and success over others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make decisions in life in relation to my studies, my career, my relationships in accordance to ‘who I want to be’ as the amount of money I want to have, which means that I am only existing For Money, for that Success and elusive Happiness that, due to how I have been brainwashed to think that happiness = consuming/ buying/ owning/ possessing all I want, need and desire, I require a Lot of Money to achieve that, which is how I have placed myself to do everything I can in order to get that much money to fulfill my desire, without realizing that in this logical assumption that I have missed the entire point of Myself as Life of Equality and Oneness as the one and only real value in this world – but instead have diminished ‘living’ and ‘my life’ to only Living-For-Money, to create and fulfill my desires and positive experiences.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define Money as a positive word due to all the images I have linked to it as owning, buying, consuming everything that I can in order to have a ‘great life experience,’ within this accepting that my ‘beingness’ is defined according to the amount of money I have/ own, as a determinant factor of who I am, what I do, who I am toward others and how I compare myself to others in society, because this is what I have learned to be and become: a person that is fighting and striving to ‘make it’ in this like, with ‘making it’ signifying getting a lot of money in order to have All that ‘I’ Want – without ever questioning if this attainment is even possible for those that have nothing to eat and are deliberately secluded from this ‘choice’ in life by our own acceptance and allowance of money as separation from who we are as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define Money as a negative thing whenever I Don’t have any money, which is when I start questioning WHY I can’t have money given to me unconditionally, why is money not given to all beings in order to have a dignified living – within this realizing that: as long as I have money = I only care to augment my own capital/ money/ wealth and attain more and more and more until I am saturated with the most money I can make in my every day living – and when I have No Money, I feel miserable, I feel ostracized, rejected, doomed, see everything dismal and with anger because I cannot have what Others have, wherein the example of the rich/ wealthy stand as that ultimate desire that is simply denied to me by the world-system, without realizing that we have all collectively agreed to make of this money system a grace and a disgrace for humanity according to the access each one has to Money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that whenever I see myself worrying about money, thinking about money, wanting and desiring money, I am in fact accepting the premise of money not being a tool given to all to live, but has become the very reason and purpose of my every day living as a motivation to live, wherein I have absolutely forgotten Who and What I am as Life/ Living of oneness and equality, because money has become our very separation from that absolute wholeness that we could in fact live in/as if we all collectively agreed that Money can be a Tool to provide, give and share to one another that which is here of the Earth in order to LIVE a wholeness of life as Equals.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take Life for Granted whenever I am only existing as this desire and constant search for Money as that experience of fulfillment, happiness, bliss, completion without realizing that it is all based on a consumerist society wherein even if I have enough to eat, to live well and comfortably, I am seeking MORE as that is what I have defined as ‘Success’ and ‘Happiness’ – wherein I go day by day comparing myself to the lives of other human beings in order to see ‘who I am’ according to the money that I have and the money that I see others have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior to others if I see that they have a lot of money which I have then defined as them being happy, fulfilled, satisfied with themselves as a synonym of ‘wholeness’ without realizing that the only wholeness that can exist is as the totality of this world, as LIFE itself that we have controlled, diminished and made an object of desire when equated to money within a monetary system that does not grant equal-access to Life by virtue of Living – this implies that who I am in relation to others exists as the separation that I have accepted and allowed as my self-definition according to the money that I have and that I compare myself to others according to the amount of money they own and I have.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define me as either poor/ middle-class/ rich as ‘Who I Am’ because of having accepted myself to be defined to one single point in my reality as Money which determines my survival, my desires of wanting More and seeking to be ‘fulfilled’ through and as money, wherein all that I seek is to constantly being able to Buy myself Experiences that I have linked to joy, happiness, success, completion, fulfillment, satisfaction as the ability to buy, own and consume everything that I can with the power I have given away when separating myself from Life into and as the acceptance of the current monetary system as Capitalism.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to visually associate Money with everything in my reality, even my physical body, as I have come to accept the fact that organs of the physical body have a price as well as hair, selling pregnancy hosting, the image of my physical body, blood, semen, fetuses and other bodily parts and functions that can be sold, including sexual services that a body can provide which are also due-to and part of the same necessity that we’ve made ourselves dependent on as Money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that within accepting money as my ultimate desire, I am neglecting the fact that all I am consuming is Myself in the name of a positive experience that I have linked to a single Idea, belief and concept of happiness, satisfaction and completion according to that which I have been taught and learned throughout my life wherein all that I know is that ‘I need money to live’ and in that single acceptance, directing my entire life, my choices, my drive to live for and as the desire of money, forgetting about who I am as Life in its totality.

I realize, see and understand that in order to stop defining myself as this ‘desire for money,’ I have to walk a process wherein I stop placing value in separation of myself as the things I buy, consume and own as a positive experience and an ‘accumulation of worth’ as ‘who I am,’ which is realizing that all the power I have embedded to money itself is a fake-value system, a make-believe system of ‘worth’ in separation of Life which is what and who I am as all as one and equal – which means that my desire for money is currently ‘real’ as long as we continue accepting and allowing the same capitalist monetary system where a ‘Successful Living’ is only linked to Money.

I realize, see and understand that this idea of money as a ‘moreness’ of myself, as this positive experience is in fact a product of the brainwashing that I have lived in as this current system wherein Life can only ‘thrive’ if having money, without having ever questioned why such money was not readily-given as a birth right, which implies that money in itself is a system of desires as the separation from ourselves as Life into a system of control/ power that promotes greed for its own continuation and survival, without ever questioning how the abuse in this world as the inability to have access to money/ poverty/ starvation and all the abusive jobs that are ‘the last resort’ to get money for the majority of the world, are in fact the abusive means that are used in order to create/ manifest the ideal of wealth and ‘fulfillment’ as a real inequality that is visible in our society – I see and realize now that money is a make-believe system that only benefited a minority while having a majority with no access or in a constant survival-mode wherein one is pushed and forced to do ‘anything for money’ which includes activities and actions that clearly denigrate our own physical body, life itself into an absolute depletion of life, due to our accepted and allowed sectarian elitist monetary system that is only at the service of a few as those with money in the world.

I commit myself to stop my constant need, desire and yearning for ‘all the money in the world’ wherein the acceptance of a ‘millionaire’ is no longer part of my daydreaming desires as an image and picture of myself as being ‘eternally happy and satisfied with myself’ as I realize that in doing so, I am tacitly agreeing and accepting the abuse, the poverty, starvation and all forms of life degradation in the name of my dream, my desire, my positive experience, which is how and why I have to now take Responsibility for what I have done, what I have become

I commit myself to within stopping myself within this constant desire to buy, consume, own and Experience life through and as what I can buy into as happiness/ success/ fulfillment – I take responsibility for walking my own process to realize the absurdity of having separated ourselves from who we are as Life of Oneness and Equality and in that, commit myself to be part of the people in the world that create a New World System based on the recognition and realization of who we are as Life as One and Equal – which means that a New Monetary System must be in place, which is the Equal Money System, wherein we stop being bound to the One System that Rules us All as a belief-system of abuse, and turn money into a tool to give and receive life as equals, as we all realize that we all want to have a comfortable life, the best possible education, food, housing, the most suitable transportation, entertainment that is in support of who we are as Life, and that can only exist if I first Stop my participation within the current monetary system of abuse – in all its inner workings – and transform myself to stand as the necessary change in the meaning of who I am not as a ‘person that desires money to live’ but a person that stands as the worth/value of life itself, which is the only value I really am and exist as – within the realization that we had trapped ourselves in a make-believe system of separation of who we are as life into a form of control, discrimination and ‘power over life’ that was never real in itself, but was ‘made real’ according to how we complied and obeyed to it as the only way to ‘continue living,’ which is unacceptable and must be obviously changed in the name of Life as who we are as Equals.

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About Marlen

I'm a human being that has decided to live by the principle of Life in Equality and place myself as a point of support for everyone that's willing to birth themselves as Life in this world.
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