Do the Emmy voters even watch television?

Tim Goodman

Published
4:00 am PDT, Friday, August 25, 2006

24: The clock has already started ticking for the thrilling and unpredictable fifth season of 24. "Day 5" will start with a four-hour, two-night season premiere on Sunday, Jan. 15 and Monday, Jan. 16 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer. ��2005 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Isabella Vosmikova/FOX.� Ran on: 01-13-2006
Kiefer Sutherland returns as Jack Bauer in the fifth season of Fox's &quo;24.&quo; less

24: The clock has already started ticking for the thrilling and unpredictable fifth season of 24. "Day 5" will start with a four-hour, two-night season premiere on Sunday, Jan. 15 and Monday, Jan. 16 ... more

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24: The clock has already started ticking for the thrilling and unpredictable fifth season of 24. "Day 5" will start with a four-hour, two-night season premiere on Sunday, Jan. 15 and Monday, Jan. 16 (8:00-10:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer. ��2005 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Isabella Vosmikova/FOX.� Ran on: 01-13-2006
Kiefer Sutherland returns as Jack Bauer in the fifth season of Fox's &quo;24.&quo; less

24: The clock has already started ticking for the thrilling and unpredictable fifth season of 24. "Day 5" will start with a four-hour, two-night season premiere on Sunday, Jan. 15 and Monday, Jan. 16 ... more

Photo: Ho

Do the Emmy voters even watch television?

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There's a very real possibility that the Emmys are a scam created by the television industry to make sure you're watching. Think about it. Year after year, a catalog of undeserving stars is nominated -- or worse, deserving stars are not nominated -- and people who actually watch television get outraged. It's an age-old public relations trick. And though it hasn't actually increased viewers or made the Emmy telecast a real can't-miss event, it certainly keeps the awards show in the news.

How else to explain the new nadir of the 2006 Primetime Emmy Awards, airing at 8 p.m. Sunday on NBC? A so-called blue-ribbon panel was supposedly created so the usual rubber-stamping of old shows, familiar names and past-their-sell-by-date series wouldn't happen yet again. This was the year we were to get fresher blood. But what happened? Well, 2002 happened. Or near to it. It's as if nobody even watched last season.

And if that snafu wasn't enough, there's the Ellen Burstyn incident. She's nominated as best supporting actress in a miniseries or TV movie for "Mrs. Harris." It's a kind gesture -- no, check that, an egregious gesture -- given that she was in the movie for what has been variously described as between 11 and 15 seconds. Yes, seconds.

That's pretty much your doping scandal of the Emmys, because it proves beyond a reasonable doubt what everyone with critical faculties has known for years: A lot of voters in the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences don't watch what they vote on. They see a familiar name, or the title of some series that's been the beneficiary of huge ads in Daily Variety, and they vote by persuasion, otherwise known as guessing.

So yes, the Emmys (and probably most other awards shows) are absolutely as horribly contrived as we've all suspected. But ultimately that changes nothing. Brilliance abounds on the small screen -- should you seek it out -- from acting to writing to directing. Much of the storytelling is great, much of the humor spot-on. Underneath the relentless procession of dreck and stupidity and low-bar expectations, you can almost see it shining. But you have to look, which apparently is too much effort for Emmy voters.

In the end, who really cares? So what if quality goes unrewarded? Hell, so what if it's even validated for all to see? It's just an awards show. Love the shows you do, let the statues scatter where they may. Let's just hope that host Conan O'Brien is funny and that Burstyn not only wins but also shows up to accept.

In the meantime, here's our annual list of should win/will win picks in the major categories. And this year, given the gratuitous failure of the Emmy system yet again, we offer up a "who's missing" section that corrects the many oversights, transgressions and embarrassments at hand. In short, until your friendly neighborhood critic gets to nominate and then pick the winners, you're stuck with the Emmys as they are.

Outstanding drama series: Nominees: "Grey's Anatomy," "24," "House," "The West Wing," "The Sopranos." Who will win: "24." Who should win: "The Sopranos." Who's missing: "Rescue Me," "Rome," "Lost," "Big Love," "The Shield." ("Deadwood" was not eligible for any Emmys this year.) There's certainly a chance that fluffy but enjoyable "Grey's Anatomy" will snooker Emmy voters, but "24" had a big year and has mounted a huge advertising campaign inside the industry. Still, there's absolutely no buying into the notion on this end that "The Sopranos" had a down year. Against the nominees in this category, the grandeur, nuance, storytelling and acting in "The Sopranos" is on another level.

Outstanding lead actor in a drama series: Nominees: Christopher Meloni ("Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"), Denis Leary ("Rescue Me"), Peter Krause ("Six Feet Under"), Kiefer Sutherland ("24"), Martin Sheen ("The West Wing"). Who will win: Sutherland. Who should win: Leary. Who's missing: James Gandolfini ("The Sopranos"), Michael Chiklis ("The Shield"), Hugh Laurie ("House"), Matthew Fox ("Lost"). Sutherland does a fine job with what he's asked to do, which is be in a perpetual state of stress and anger. But it's time Leary got recognized for the fact that he's not just a prickly comedian, he's a superb actor. And yet this whole topic is pointless. Gandolfini's work this past season was broadly illustrious, which is saying something, given what he's already proved he's capable of.

Outstanding lead actress in a drama series: Nominees: Geena Davis ("Commander-in-Chief"), Mariska Hargitay ("Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"), Frances Conroy ("Six Feet Under"), Allison Janney ("The West Wing"), Kyra Sedgwick ("The Closer"). Who will win: Hargitay. Who should win: Sedgwick. Who's missing: Edie Falco ("The Sopranos"), CCH Pounder ("The Shield"), Polly Walker ("Rome"), Jeanne Triplehorn ("Big Love"), Kristen Bell ("Veronica Mars"), Felicity Huffman ("Desperate Housewives"). Of the nominees, Sedgwick is the best of the bunch. But this category was a real travesty of overlooked actresses. Again, however, there's no real contest here. Falco is the poster actress this season for the biggest Emmy abuse. She won it outright in the first three episodes and solidified it later with emotional shading. Her exclusion here is beyond unacceptable.

Outstanding supporting actor in a drama series: Nominees: Oliver Platt ("Huff"), Michael Imperioli ("The Sopranos"), Gregory Itzin ("24"), Alan Alda ("The West Wing"), William Shatner ("Boston Legal"). Who will win: Platt. Who should win: Platt. Who's missing: Forest Whitaker ("The Shield"), Kevin McKidd ("Rome"), Ray Stevenson ("Rome"), Ciaran Hinds ("Rome"), Harry Dean Stanton ("Big Love"). Whitaker should be holding the trophy, and there should be very little argument about that. Imperioli is always exceptional, but it wasn't his finest year. Platt, one of the great character actors alive, was essentially told to chew scenery with his dysfunctional "Huff" character, and he didn't disappoint in that regard.

Outstanding comedy series: Nominees: "Arrested Development," "Curb Your Enthusiasm," "The Office," "Scrubs," "Two and a Half Men." Who will win: "The Office." Who should win: "Arrested Development." Who's missing: "My Name Is Earl," "Entourage," "Weeds," "Extras." First off, "The Office" is great. A win here would be lovely and justified. But "Arrested Development," a past winner, overcame its biggest obstacle -- Fox, its own network -- and wrapped up a canceled series as well as any in history. Still, the story here is "Earl" missing in action. How can this be possible (leaving aside the easy answer: It's the Emmys)? "Earl" could have won here easily. "Entourage," where art thou? And though "Weeds" might be a better fit in the drama category, it certainly should get some recognition somewhere.

Outstanding lead actor in a comedy series: Nominees: Larry David ("Curb Your Enthusiasm"), Kevin James ("The King of Queens"), Tony Shalhoub ("Monk"), Steve Carell ("The Office"), Charlie Sheen ("Two and a Half Men"). Who will win: Carell. Who should win: Carell. Who's missing: Jason Bateman ("Arrested Development"), Jason Lee ("My Name Is Earl"), Ricky Gervais ("Extras"), Zach Braff ("Scrubs"). This is definitely a what-could-have-been category. A lot of talent overlooked. Bateman should already have a couple of Emmys for his work, and an argument could be made that Lee would have won this year had he even been nominated. A shame, really, but Carell will do this category some justice.

Outstanding lead actress in a comedy series: Nominees: Lisa Kudrow ("The Comeback"), Jane Kaczmarek ("Malcolm in the Middle"), Julia Louis-Dreyfus ("The New Adventures of Old Christine"), Stockard Channing ("Out of Practice"), Debra Messing ("Will & Grace"). Who will win: Louis-Dreyfus. Who should win: Kaczmarek. Who's missing: Jessica Walter ("Arrested Development"), Mary-Louise Parker ("Weeds"), Lauren Graham ("Gilmore Girls"). As long as it's not Channing or a wet goodbye kiss to Messing, all anger will abate. But still, those are three major oversights on the missing.

Outstanding supporting actor in a comedy series: Nominees: Will Arnett ("Arrested Development"), Jeremy Piven ("Entourage"), Bryan Cranston ("Malcolm in the Middle"), Jon Cryer ("Two and a Half Men"), Sean Hayes ("Will & Grace"). Who will win: Piven. Who should win: Piven. Who's missing: Terry Crews ("Everybody Hates Chris"), Kevin Dillon ("Entourage"), Jerry Ferrara ("Entourage"), Rex Lee ("Entourage"), John C. McGinley ("Scrubs"), David Cross ("Arrested Development"), Jeffrey Tambor ("Arrested Development"). As much as it would be great to see Arnett get his due as one of the most underappreciated comic actors going, Piven has never flagged in his ability to make "Entourage" hum.

Outstanding supporting actress in a comedy series: Nominees: Cheryl Hines ("Curb Your Enthusiasm"), Alfre Woodard ("Desperate Housewives"), Jaime Pressly ("My Name Is Earl"), Elizabeth Perkins ("Weeds"), Megan Mullally ("Will & Grace"). Who will win: Mullally. Who should win: Pressly. Who's missing: Portia de Rossi ("Arrested Development"), pretty much anyone from "The Office," Ashley Jensen ("Extras"), Tichina Arnold ("Everybody Hates Chris)," Sarah Chalke ("Scrubs)." A constantly overlooked category which may in part point to the need for better and bigger comedic roles for women. But a win for Pressly would be wholly deserved because absolutely no one thought she could do that job.