Dove Thinks You’re More Beautiful Than You Think You Are

Last month, Mbird mentioned in passing the “Dove Real Beauty Sketches” ad, but now that the video has become the most watched ad ever, with over 114 million views, perhaps we should take a closer look at the implications of the ad’s overwhelming popularity. (Apparently Dove superseded the Evian Roller Babies for the number one spot, which is a step in a good direction.) If you haven’t seen the ad yet it’s definitely worth watching. The take away is summed up in a line of text at the end: “You are more beautiful than you think.”

The clip is moving, and it’s no wonder that it went viral and elicited such a strongly emotional response online, as it shows what most of us have probably hoped was true—that we are our own harshest judges. This realization is incredibly relieving, and many of the women, moved to tears, resolve to better appreciate themselves physically.

The message strikes an emotional chord, and encouraging women to feel beautiful is a great thing. However, I was glad to read an excellent post by blogger Jazz Brice, who describes why the ad left her feeling not beautiful and empowered, but uneasy and even angry. Brice describes how the ad furthers a very narrow definition of beauty, a definition that excludes aging, blemishes, and any body type or face shape that cannot be described as “thin.” She writes, “So you’re beautiful… if you’re thin, don’t have noticeable wrinkles or scars, and have blue eyes. If you’re fat or old… uh, maybe other people don’t think you look as fat and old as you do yourself? Great?”

Criticism along these lines, while valid, needs to be taken with a grain of salt. Dove is a cosmetics company after all—outward beauty is their line of work. While a Dove commercial promoting inner beauty or soul power would be great, it probably wouldn’t help them sell wrinkle cream. But Brice takes her criticism a step more meta (and a step more betta?…that was bad, I’m sorry…), by asking, “Why are so many females I know having such a strong reaction to the sketches video, being moved to the point of tears? Because the message that we constantly receive is that girls are not valuable without beauty. ”

Brice continues:

And my primary problem with this Dove ad is that it’s not really challenging the message like it makes us feel like it is. It doesn’t really tell us that the definition of beauty is broader than we have been trained to think it is, and it doesn’t really tell us that fitting inside that definition isn’t the most important thing. It doesn’t really push back against the constant objectification of women. All it’s really saying is that you’re actually not quite as far off from the narrow definition as you might think that you are (if you look like the featured women, I guess).

The participants’ own takeaways at the end of the video testify to this more than anything. Brice quotes one of the women, who tells the camera that her perception of her own beauty affects her choices, the friends she makes, the jobs she applies for, and even the lives of her children. “It impacts everything. It couldn’t be more critical to your happiness,” she says. Isn’t that a little scary? And the scarier part is that she’s probably more right than we’d like to admit. (It probably goes without saying, but this problem is not unique to women. Men struggle in real ways with body image too. That said, to see a hilarious gender-reversed parody of the Dove ad- watch this!)

A different quote, however, stuck out to me. After seeing her sketches, a teary-eyed woman confesses, “I’ve come a long way in how I see myself, but I think I still have some way to go.” Many of the women feel that it is up to them to progress farther along the path of self-image, in an effort to reach some ideal of perfect self-perception. The compliments of others (in this case the other women’s more flattering descriptions) then become a tool for us to improve how we see ourselves. Not only are we obviously physical imperfect, but we are also imperfect in the way that we perceive ourselves as imperfect. I imagine that many of these women engage in the kind of self-talk that we all use to try and make ourselves feel better, something along the lines of, “Wow, I look so tired and old today. And I really have the worst jaw-line. No, wait, stop! I’ve gotta stop thinking like that!” This law of perfect self-perception can be an even bigger headache than the plain old self-directed physical criticism.

What might come as a deeper relief to the Dove ladies (and all of us) would be a message that allows for the freedom not only to stop looking at ourselves so critically, but also to stop thinking about how we look at ourselves. At its brightest, the Christian message doesn’t ask that we try harder to ignore ourselves, but rather it gives us permission to forget ourselves. All of us who feel stuck between inner voices of relentless criticism and positive self-talk can take real comfort because it’s not all about us and what we can achieve—physically, mentally, or even spiritually. Whether or not we believe it when we look in the mirror, our worth lies far past any measurements of beauty, and because of that, we have the freedom to look at Christ with gratitude and, who knows, maybe even start looking at others, without giving them a drawing of what we see that they can analyze.

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5 comments

It seems to me that “self-forgetfulness” should not lead to disregarding the goodness and beauty of creation. I know you’re not asking us to “ignore” ourselves, but I have to believe that the Gospel is not making our self-perception irrelevant but is rather redeeming the way we look at ourselves .Just because our self-perception isn’t ultimate that doesn’t make it meaningless or something that should be forgotten. Christ’s body was destroyed to one day redeem ours. God made us bodied and when the Gospel transforms us we can begin believing that “our worth lies far past any measurements of beauty” but for the rest of our lives (and then again at the resurrection) we are still going to live in our bodies. It seems to me that forgetting our bodies was never God’s intention but rather restoring a proper (neither self-righteous or self-forgetful) self-perception.

Thanks, Jason. I’m a little fuzzy on the word “redeem.” To buy back? I’ve only ever seen the word in the NT with its subject as the whole human being, and as referring to our condemnation under the law (the exception being Titus, “from every lawless deed”.

But if we’re talking about restoration – i.e. making us look at ourselves the way we were meant to all along – I keep thinking that self-consciousness is the first result of the Fall (in the Genesis account) and thus the ultimate biblical symbol of incurvatus in se.

For Aquinas, Dante, Calvin, Augustine, etc, it’s only self-forgetfulness (to use a modern term) in being absorbed by the beauty of God’s glory that makes us glorified. The only self-consciousness in a state of restoration in the Bible in that I can find is need – Adam’s need for a companion, the martyrs under the altar’s need for the consummation of creation (Rev – see too Rm 8:19) – but it’s always outward-directed and, if not entirely self-oblivious, certainly yearning to be by taking enjoyment in something outside of and beyond the self (e.g. God’s glory). But those are just biblical hints – the question of how we’ll perceive ourselves after the eschaton is beyond me. But I sure know I could use a bit more self-forgetfulness…

Johnson, where I was using the word “redeem” from was Romans 8 (which you pointed me to as well) where we see that creation, even specifically, our bodies groan for redemption (of which Paul claims we already have the first fruits already). This work of bodily redemption has begun (although is largely yet to be) and I just can’t imagine that if God intended our bodies as good gifts which he will redeem then he would also have us disregard them somehow. Why wouldn’t that redemption include our perceptions of our bodies as well? Why wouldn’t we rejoice in that work of God?

I like the way you emphasize that the restored state will be outward-directed (which I totally see in scripture) but I don’t believe that it will be really self-oblivious too much at all. The psalms glorify God by remarking that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. That is outward directed but it must also be self-conscious. If the wonders of creation are intended to turn our hearts outward in praise then we must have the capacity to observe, study, and celebrate creation. I think a Biblical self-conscienceness delights outwardly in the work of God in both creation and redemption and our bodies are one of humans primary experiences of those works.

I think we read too much into the text to say that self-consciousness is a result of the fall – you already pointed out a great example of self-awareness prior to the fall. I think it is reading too much into the text to say that the kind of “body shame” this article is talking about as well, but I think that shame is a more direct result of the fall than self-consciousness is. I just see in the story of the Bible of a God who created a psychical world, and who remains utterly committed to it – going out of his way to not that we will be bodied forever.

I think why this important is because we have no other experience of life besides a bodily one. Our bodies are vital to worship (would you rather look at photos of the Grand Canyon or be there in person?) and the only way we will have eternal outward focus is through a right relationship to our bodies. This is clearly by God’s design. However, our bodies are one area of huge frustration for humankind (and, as this article points out, especially for women). I think it is so important to affirm our human experience and to validate women’s painful struggles. As true as it may be to say: “eh, beauty isn’t ultimate so it is good for us to rejoice that the Gospel frees us to forget ourselves” I think that has a terrible potential to be read as glib and be misunderstood to mean that their struggles with body image are petty and God simply intends to do away with them. I think we need to say that body image isn’t ultimate, but the reason why it is such a painful struggle is because our bodies and our self-perceptions were intended to be glorious and without shame. I think it is a powerful human experience because God intends to redeem it so that it will properly last forever – not just so it will come out in the wash and be forgotten. It hurts, not because we are making something inconsequential more important than it should be but because it was meant to be glorious and it’s not fully redeemed yet.

Yes, of course being absorbed by the beauty of God’s glory is how we will be glorified, but that absorption will never look like the destruction of self. When I first became a Christian I thought that everything that was “me” had to go away in order to be this new creation and I suppressed all of the random particularities of my personality and tastes always worried that I would be making too much of me and not enough of God. I forced myself to be quite at parties and not draw attention to myself because I knew that I was there on mission to make God look great, not me. Eventually I learned that in doing so I was actually concealing God’s glory and considering God’s gifts to me to as something to hide. I think I was hurt by being told to die to self in a way which is unbiblical. Regeneration doesn’t rid us of our humanity or our “self” or our bodies and I don’t believe that worship should either. We don’t stand in a field of flowers and force ourselves to delight in God’s glory in a way that makes the flowers grow dim – we delight in God’s glory in a way that makes each individual flower glow with a beauty we hadn’t noticed before. If someone is sinning by making the flowers ultimate instead of God then problem isn’t the flowers – when that person learns to worship God properly then a proper appreciation of the flowers will follow – not a disregard for the flower.

Yes, the self is not ultimate but I believe that the self is means by which God designed us to outwardly glorifying him. As much as you might want to forget yourself you actually don’t have a choice but to worship God from within yourself. You might imagine that it might be easier to worship God if your “self” wasn’t getting in the way but God created your self and fully intends to keep you around, bodily, forever. The Good News isn’t that our self-perception issues don’t matter, but that God will make them right!

I am sorry this rambled on so long – clearly I am working through some of these issues myself. I have been hurt by teachings that your comments reminded me of and I was reacting to that hurt even maybe more so than your comment. Thank you for your thoughtful response – I think we agree about far more than we disagree about – we will have some manner of self-perception in the eschaton and it will be ultimately be outward focused.

This is one of the most insightful posts I’ve read lately. I’ve also “abreacted” with this ad, and I devoted some time to thinking about it Mbird style too. Perhaps it was my gender, but I completely missed the very serious “law” undertones of this ad. Geez oh man! Great catch, Emily!

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