TGI Friday’s Customer Inadvertently Becomes Cannibal

By consumerist.comMay 4, 2006

You know, it’s sort of nice to hear about a lopped off digit found half-cooked in someone’s food that wasn’t a lawsuit scam.

The hunk of pulsating human flesh was served up in a diner’s cheeseburger at a Bloomington, Indiana TGI Friday’s, the gruesome denouement of a kitchen accident that caused a cook to lose half his finger. In the gore soaked panic that followed, the cook was rushed off to the hospital, but one waitress decided that the show must go on and served up the culinary delight the cook was working on at the time. Rermember, guys: you’re just one kitchen accident away from inadvertently developing a craving for human flesh.

The manager of the TGI Friday’s issued this apologetic understatement: “We absolutely acknowledge the seriousness of this incident, and we are very, very sorry that this occurred,” she said.

Can we have a nation wide policy? Once blood starts spurting in the kitchen during food preparation, let’s just call it a day. Give all your waiting customers a gift certificate for one free meal and mop up the gelling pools of Type A off the food preparation counters before you start serving again.