So this is why we don’t see Johnny Depp on stage very often (ever?) at awards shows. Last night at the Hollywood Film Awards, Depp introduced the documentary ‘Supermensch,’ about legendary talent manager Shep Gordon, and immediately made it pretty clear that he was not sober-minded. “That’s the weirdest microphone I’ve ever seen in my life,” he slurs—except, you know, it’s just a regular microphone.

The awards were hosted on CBS, and Depp’s speech introducing the documentary directed by fellow actor Mike Myers (yes, as in ‘Austin Powers’) had to be censored several times as he continued to slur out profanities. It’s difficult to understand why Depp was behaving this way—maybe he’s method acting for the next ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’? Maybe he was nervous and had a little too much champagne?

“It’s just one of those nights,” Depp said. Ah, that explains it. We’ve all had one of those nights when you get hammered and have to honor one of your dearest friends at an awards show on live television—a dear friend who happens to be featured in a new documentary touting his legendary status in Hollywood. Who hasn’t been there?

Later, Myers referred to Depp's “performance” as “very rock ‘n’ roll.” It was very something. At least he didn’t wear a dumb hat!