Monster of the Day #1278

This year B-Fest itself basically went down very smooth. There was only one great film (an old friend), but barring just a few movies, pretty much everything was solid and there was good variety.

This was the second of Lou Ferrigno’s two Hercules movies, and pretty light on monsters. Basically, the producers had the chutzpuh to insert (a couple of times) a rotoscoped copy of the Id Monster from Forbidden Planet and here, even more obviously, just rotoscoped over the T-Rex fight from the original King Kong. Because no one’s ever seen that movie.

Glad to hear everything went well at B-Fest, one of these days, I have to go (sigh)…

I’ve seen one of these movies, I think this one. As I remember Ferrigno came down to Earth to beat monsters to death (the screen flashing red when he punched something) and then they’d vanish giving up a magical item he’d retrieve.

Reminds me of a computer role-playing game, beat on the snake until it vanishes giving you a suit of chain mail. What a snake would do with a suit of chain mail (wear it?) and where it kept it (it has a backpack???) always bothered me.

Eric Hinkle

I remember seeing this one! It was so goofy I wondered if it was some sort of a parody.

Beckoning Chasm

I kind of prefer the first Hercules movie, where he throws a bear into space. Luigi Cozzi doesn’t really seem to have any filmmaking abilities.

I was going to say I’d seen at least one of these films, but doing a little research I’m reminded that Ferrigno did Sindbad of the Seven Seas, and it’s in a time period where my family rented a lot of movies. (If it had a HOT sticker on the box, my Mom picked it up. Every time. We saw A LOT of bad movies that way.)

Man. Luigi Cozzi. Seems like his movie making skills dropped dramatically after Star Crash You’d have thought that impossible, but that’s the “genius” of the man. He managed to do it, and keep right on doing it.

You know, you probably could teach a class about how to make good movies by watching nothing but bad films…

Flangepart

YES!
“Class, today we will have a study on how NOT to make a movie. You will be free to riff on the target of today, Lou Ferrigno’s HERCULES. But remember, you will be graded on the quality of your riffs, for if Joel and the Bots have taught us anything, it’s that swearing is way too easy, but clever is hard!”

If I ever *intentionally* make the trip by car again, we could carpool. I passed not too far north of you on I-81 during the great Post-Blizzard Adventure of 2016 on the way back to Richmond.

The Rev.

I saw this a couple of years ago (still haven’t seen the first one). It was fun at times, although it did drag at points. This, however, made my jaw literally drop, even harder than the Id Monster had.

Rock Baker

Yeah, as I noted in my own review, I was never sure if this was supposed to be a tribute or a bald steal. Should I respond to it warmly, or is my gut reaction of hatred the correct response?

I do believe both films would make a good review subject for Ken, though.

Beckoning Chasm

I found Star Crash to be really, really dull, honestly. Alien Contamination had some potential but it also left me yawning.

Sinbad of the Seven Seas, on the other hand, is a gloriously goofy movie. Everyone I’ve shown it to has ended up a fan. And yeah, Luigi worked on that one (added some sparkly effects) but its fun comes from Enzo Castili (sp?) and a marvelously, gloriously goofy script. “No one, not even Sinbad, the man who I hate more than hate itself, can stand between me and my heart’s desire!!! (long pause) HA!!

The Rev.

I thought Starcrash was a hoot. I also loved that they kept managing to dress *sigh* Caroline Munro in a series of sexy outfits, each one hotter than the last. (That last one with the mesh across the cleavage…GOOD SWEET LORD.)Alien Contamination…I’m gonna be lazy and repost what I put on the B-Masters site about it. Warning: a bit long.

“Overall I enjoyed it. I can’t say I loved it, but I was more entertained than not. There were a couple of stretches around the middle that were dull going, and Stella’s transformation to useless damsel in distress was infuriating; those were my biggest problems. I could have done without every single exploding person/animal scene being shot in slo-mo, especially since they were more splattery and enthusiastic than realistic, and not helped by getting a good long look at them. The exploding rat was fairly boffo, though. Speaking of, Lyz will be happy to know I worried about what they did to the real rat to get it to suddenly start struggling when they “injected” it. Sure, the animal appeared to end up no worse for wear, but it felt like they either actually injected it with something or the actor started squeezing it.
On the plus side, the opening scenes were good, the warehouse scene had a couple of nice moments, there was some good interplay between the characters, and the last scenes pick up steam again, including that one really good twist (I didn’t think things would play out that way until, well, they actually did). The explosion effect isn’t particularly convincing, as I said, but it happens so often and is so silly that I found it got funnier each time it happened. I found it interesting that the pods cooed (snored?) when they were ripe. My favorite part of the movie was easily the alien. The screenshot Lyz had of it was pretty nice, but isn’t a good substitute for seeing it in action. I really liked it; it had some nice details (like the two slobbering, quivering mouths) and I found it to be an effective presence. It reminded me of the alien from Demonwarp, in that both were rubbery, mostly-immobile aliens that show up at the very end of their respective movies. Of course, this one was a lot better-looking and more proactive in getting its daily requirement of human flesh, so it’s hands-down the winner of that particular comparison.
It’s a fun way to spend some time, I’d say. I won’t be rewatching it as often as, say, Zombi 2, but I’m sure I’ll watch it again.”

Gamera977

Yeah, if you guys are ever crazy enough to do it again lemme know! I really just need to pony up for a plane ticket.

I really enjoyed Star Crash when I finally watched it a couple of years back. Sindbad I remember as being very disappointing for some reason; it might be worth my time to look up. But the grand champion has to be Il gatto nero, aka Demons 6, aka Seriously, What the Hell Did I Just Watch? It’s just a random series of horror movie clichés strapped together. It sullies the names of Edgar Allen Poe, Thomas De Quincy, and Dairo Argento, And maybe even Mario Bava’s. I’ve seen worse movies and worse directors, but Cozzi… man…

Honestly, it was only about 12 hours driving with breaks. And with gas at $1.50 a gallon, I’d be willing to do it again if it wouldn’t mean taking an extra day off work for the drive out. Once I actually have some PTO at the new job I might consider it.

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