“Love my friends. We’re all walking down our own paths, but to still be there for one another no matter the distance, time difference, etc…” posted on voila.its.viola on 8/2/18

This hit me at a time where I felt like I had just gotten it all together and now it was falling apart and all I could do was smile. I had been in a constant communication with two friends (Domo and Drea) who I basically share almost everything with. I’d been a little in my feelings about other friends that are never around or answer when I need them, but I’m always there for them.

My friend Mario called me via Facebook at bootycall hours. At first I wasn’t going to answer, but after just waking up from a horrible dream and reading a bible verse I picked up. Something told me to talk to him. Plus, I’ve come to learn that when folks call at that hour it’s usually bad news. At first I joked with him “hey man, what I tell you about calling me during these hour?” Lol. He apologized and shared with me the loss of his mother. Continue reading →

Yesterday my fitness challenge has ended and I am disappointed. Eh, maybe not disappointed, but I feel a ways about it. Not with the program. Not with the journey. And believe it or not not with myself. My own personal fitness goals were to start eating better, drop some pounds (at least 10), and more importantly loose body fat. I’m still not sure exactly what besides not meeting the goal the gym set for me. Loose 6 percent body fat. My BMI was high y’all. I feel something like a failure.

I knew it would be challenging as I am not as young or active as I used to be. However, I was pushing myself to stick to it and give my all for the results, not just temporarily but for life. In the beginning I wasn’t seeing results, but during weigh in the results were there and a bit unbelievable to me. Then halfway into to it, it seemed to flip. I was losing pounds and body fat and BOMB, all of a sudden body fat increases. It hit me hard.

I’m back! Again. After about one month of blog silence, I’m back. I didn’t have brain freeze, nor was it due to lack of content, but homeslessness. Yes, you read that right. I’ve been struggling with accepting it and sharing it with others other than those involved and my mother. It was tough, but now I’m ready and able to share.

In the last 3 months I’ve moved at total of four times. Yes, you read right, four. Not really by choice if you will, but more so for a purpose. In my hiatus, I stressed about not being employed for a spell, not being about to contribute to household bills let alone clear my credit cards and more. And in the same breath I began working on myself inside and out. I completed a gratitude challenge with 21ninety, I kicked out cash (my last at the time that was gifted to me for a new camera) that I really didn’t have for a 6-week gym challenge and membership. Aside from caring for myself, I would also be caring for my six-year-old niece part-time. It didn’t seem like a lot. The bigger picture was always in mind.

I’m learning to embrace all aspects of my journey. Before, I honestly despised reflecting on the negative things that have occurred in my life. I guess that was my (unhealthy) way of coping. I’ve grown and matured in a way that allows me to reflect and not dwell on the past hurts. I’m learning to reflect, feel, acknowledge and continue forward. Always forward.

Near the completion of my second college career I decided that I’d get more into reading self-help books, tending to my mental help and providing myself with continuous self-love (hey, that ought to be a post on it’s on ;)). During this journey, that I plan to make a permanent part of my lifestyle, I came across a 21 Day Gratitude Challenge.