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Topic: Shadowstalker - Chapter One (Read 2372 times)

About a year ago, I brought you a photonovel series called The Sith Revelations. Budget, real life, and a variety of other things interfered, however, and I quietly axed the project the weekend after Thanksgiving after the latest novel had been posted. One week later, I found a Utapau Shadow Trooper at Target. I had an idea for a Photonovel ever since I saw the prototype pics for the Trooper, but decided to hold off for a while. Now, I have decided to pick up the project and bring it to you. Here's a preview...

The Clone Wars are raging across the Galaxy. Jedi and their Clones fight Battle Droids on various planets. Luckily, I am not with them.

I am a specially trained Clone Trooper - like ARC Troopers, only a few of my kind exist. However, I am different than any other Clone. My work begins at sundown.

Interesting things happen at night. Greedy politicians make deals with underworld gangsters, threatening what little peace and stability is left in the galaxy. They sit in the shadows of their offices, thinking they're alone.

But they don't know that I'm there with them. Listening to every word they say. They're about to die. All because of me.

definetley looks great man! seems like it'll have a very interesting plot, i always enjoy stories from the soldiers point of view. that add at the end was my favorite part, that was actually like a movie trailer, very cool!

Logged

=jEdIsTyLe=---------------------------------------------------------" The first soap was made from the ashes of hero's, with out pain, with out sacrifice, we would have nothing."

Thanks everyone! I'm hoping not to disappoint. I've decided to "borrow" SA Longhorn's format of posting each new PN in the same thread, I hope that makes it easier for everyone.

I had a lot of free time this weekend, and was able to finish the relatively simple Chapter One: Introduction. Hopefully this will tide you guys over until July, as I'll be leaving for vacation next week. Enjoy!

DATELINE: PLANET RODIA. It all started here, one month ago with the Rodian Primary Elections. Former Rodian senator Beevo Norhnol lost the election to Onaconda Farr. Norhnol brought lots of peace and prosperity to Rodia, and was said to have felt betrayed by his planet. He disappeared soon after.

And late last week, Senator Meena Tills of Mon Calamari, shown here in this file photo, also mysteriously vanished after a visit to Naboo.

There have been multiple rumors that an anti-human terrorist group known as the "Alien's Voice" are behind these kidnappings. Recently, the Alien's Voice has been releasing grainy videos over the Holonet, the most notable one showing a Jedi being decapatated with his own lightsaber. They have been rumored to be planning an attack, and perhaps the kidnappings of two important political figures is the beginning.

The only clue left behind was a photo that surfaced on the Holonet just before news of Senator Tills' kidnapping broke out. It shows Norhnol in front of a doorway, appearing to be begging for something. The poor quality of the photo reinforces beliefs that this is all the work of the Alien's Voice.

Many questions are left to be answered. Where is Norhnol? Where is Senator Tills? Does the Alien's Voice have anything to do with the disappearances? Is it all a scheme by the Confederacy? Hopefully there are enough troopers, and Jedi, to find out.

On Coruscant, Chancellor Palpatine meets with Jedi Masters Mace Windu and Yoda...Palpatine: Thank you for being able to see me on such short notice, Master Windu and Master Yoda. It's been a long week, especially with the kidnapping of Senator Tills.Windu: Indeed. However, I sense that Tills is still on Naboo. Either myself or Master Yoda can lead a group of clones and rescue him.Palpatine: That won't be necessary, Master Windu.

Palpatine: You see, the reason I've asked you here today is to show you my new toy, so to speak. It arrived last night, direct from Kamino.Yoda: Hmm, a new clone trooper you have to show us, Chancellor?

Palpatine: Correct, Master Yoda. He's a special ops clone, who works in the shadows. His codename is "Shadowstalker".Windu: So he's like a recon clone then. Scouts the area and gives the okay for the assault?Palpatine: Well, yes and no.

Palpatine: You see, the Shadow Trooper is specially trained to infiltrate places where a large attack is unnecessary. For example, he can steal data from the enemy, or silently eliminate or capture someone who works close to Count Dooku. His helmet includes special night vision and thermal goggles, which help him in his missions.Windu: So what you're saying is...Yoda: ...Stealth, his objective is.

Palpatine: Yes, right as always Master Yoda. Now, behind this door is the most advanced soldier in the Republic army. Kamino is training more, although a very small number of them will exist. "Mickey" was the first one to complete his training. Would you like to meet him?

Palpatine opens the door. Steam is released, and out of the steam emerges a pitch black trooper with grey markings and a red visor.Palpatine: Mickey, these are Jedi Masters Mace Windu and Yoda.Mickey: Hello.Windu: Pleasure to meet you.Yoda: Agreed, a pleasure it is.

Palpatine: Now, there is one problem, Mickey requires a "boss" so to speak... someone to stay connected to him on his missions, inform him of his position, give him details from satellite imagery, all that fancy stuff. I myself am no technological mastermind, but I believe the two of you are.Yoda: Busy I am, teaching younglings. But Master Windu, Jedi Council meetings, are his only priority.Windu: I'm not so sure about this...

Mickey: Master Windu, I am trained to do whatever it takes to preserve peace and stability in the Republic. With the Clone Wars going on, my job is to stop anyone else from creating a diversion, so the Republic can fully concentrate on the war. I'm an elite intelligence-gathering force - I'm invisible and razor sharp, like a sliver of grass. If I'm captured or killed, the Republic denies my existance. Even if anything happens, no harm or blame will come to you. There's nothing to worry about.

Palpatine: Please, Master Windu? I beg you. And you'll be a part of a team, I have two other select members who will be standing by with you and communicating to Mickey as well. Please?Windu: Well, I'll give it a shot. But for the first run only. After that, I'll decide if I want to join in on this "team".Palpatine: Thank you for accepting, Master Windu! It means a lot to me. The Republic thanks you.

Palpatine: Now, my pilot will take you to the HQ, located near my office. There you will be further briefed, and we can work out Mickey's first mission. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to make a transmission. Good luck.Windu turns to Yoda after Palpatine walks off.Windu: I have a bad feeling about this.Yoda: Clouded, is the future of this project. But sense I do, that the first mission will be successful. Senator Tills, I feel we will find.

Mickey: Master Windu, I've heard of you before. You have quite the reputation as a Jedi not to mess with. I know you aren't open to Project Shadow, but I will say it will be a pleasure to work with you, even if it is for one mission.Windu: The pleasure is all mine.The Gunship flies off as the new partners shake hands.

Sorry about that one pic, I'm not sure why it keeps shrinking? Ah well. Hope you all enjoy!

Man, you are well on your way to kicking some serious butt in the PN section!

The only small suggestion I'd make: Make Palpatine a bit more authoratative. Insead of "please, Master Windu, take this mission", I'd think Palpatine would say "We've all been asked to make sacrifices for this war, Master Windu. Surely you would not put yourself above making one of your own." And I'd make Windu a bit more gruff. Instead of saying the pleasure is his own, I'd rather he respond on more of a Sam Jackson way... something like:

Mickey: "It will be a pleasure to work with you, Master Windu"Windu: "I am sure it will, trooper"

Diddly it's good to see this new PN series starting with you. I liked most of it, but there were a few things I thought you might want to reconsider.

Mickey - That's a pretty odd name for a Clone, and also as a Star Wars character. It just seems too wussy like, and like a Disney character...

Palpatine - I'd make him be a little more authorative like In Rem said. But I do kind of like him "begging" Windu a bit, if makes Palpatine even more two faced.

Also, I'd maybe try and create more of a background if you can, even some boxes/crates or somethign would look cool.

There was good stuff too, I mostly enjoyed the backstory/plot. Very cool seeing the mystery be told about the Rodian... I kind of wish you were sending a fan-fic Jedi of your own with the clone however, as then we wouldn't know what that Jedi's fate would be.