Tag: weird theory

There’s something slightly odd about the world of Pokémon. It’s not the hundreds of animals with elemental powers and supernatural abilities. No, that all makes perfect sense when you think about it. It’s the world itself that doesn’t quite make sense.

I’ve poked fun at the nature of Pokémon in the past – the effortless and never-ending happiness of every NPC, the unspoken chivalric code between Pokémon, the disturbing side of Poké Balls – but I only recently put all the mysterious pieces together in one theory. A theory which explains all the oddities in the game series. A theory as airtight as it is entirely unnecessary.

I’m sure that anyone who has played an instalment of the Legend of Zelda series must admire Link, the protagonist of the series. Whilst there are in fact numerous different versions of Link, with slightly altered personalities and art styles, those who have played will understand that every version of the young warrior is brave, noble and prepared to put his life on the line to save the current Kingdom under threat. Those who have followed the franchise will certainly hold the many forms of this hero with high regard. From Koholint Island to Termina to Hyrule, each incarnation of Link is highly respected and often loved…

…but should Link be feared as well? Once the evil is vanquished, the war is won and Link’s job is complete, what would the hero do next? Does he slip quietly back into the simple life he had before his adventure began?

There is no doubt that the God of War series is excellent, most of the time. I wouldn’t try to convince you otherwise. There are, however, a few aspects of each game that don’t add up; details in each episode that don’t quite fit; features of gameplay that don’t belong; strange moments in Kratos’ behaviour…

Individually, these minor issues mean very little, I could brush them aside with comments like “oh, that’s just a small mistake, no harm done”. When brought together and treated collectively, I have gradually begun to realise that these ‘small mistakes’ could be subtle clues to the true story behind the whole series. Clues to the true identity of the main character.

I could keep my ridiculous views to myself, but I’m of the opinion that every theory, no matter how bonkers, should be addressed and discussed. And this theory is truly bonkers. In fact, it’s crazy on more than one level…

THE THEORY:

Short version: ‘Kratos’ is completely insane and he is not the God of War.

Long Version: Kratos is not a Spartan. He is not, and has never been, the God of War. He is not even alive during the time of the Ancient Greeks or Greek Gods. Kratos, whatever his real name is, (probably something similar like ‘Craig’ or ‘Chistopher’) lives somewhere in the modern world, deep within the walls of a psychiatric hospital. The gods, monsters, scenes and violent acts ‘Kratos’ perceives are, in fact, incredibly vivid hallucinations.

At this point you might be thinking: “Red Head, you could argue that every game is imagined, a dream, or make believe.” That’s true, but in the GoW series, that’s the point. My theory is that Kratos’ insanity is a deliberate part of the game’s design, gameplay and story – I believe that the games’ creators have deliberately placed clues throughout every ‘episode’ to the truth behind the illusions. I expect that in the next few instalments of the God of War series, the real world will begin to seep into the game, cracks will begin to appear, as Kratos’ mind begins to come to terms with the fact that his adventures are all in his head.

Warning: This blog contains itty bitty God of War spoilers.

THE PROOF:

1) ‘Kratos’ doesn’t know his own strength.

I wrote a blog last week about double-jumping, in which I make fun of Kratos. I pointed out how he seems to have trouble lifting himself off the ground, despite being strong enough to boot open giant doors and stamp creatures to death. This isn’t the only irregularity concerning Kratos’ physical power.

He can murder monsters a hundred times his size with brute force, but opening chests causes him to struggle and strain. At one point in his adventures, we see Kratos forcefully prise a titan’s finger and thumb apart. But not just any titan… a titan strong enough to hold up the earth. Yet time and time again, we watch the God of War whimper and whine as he wrestles with closed gates, straining painfully to lift a few bars of metal. I used to be worried that he might have a hernia.

This discrepancy could just be an oversight in game design. Just maybe though, we should have already realised that Kratos isn’t really using physical strength. Instead, his troubled mind is making up rules as it goes.

2) The guy is always raging.

What did you do when you were last angry? Shout and swear, pace up and down, grumble to yourself? Maybe you played a violent video game? Whatever you did, at some point you would have begun to chill out. It might have taken you a while, and you may have been quickly annoyed by something else, but for a time you were a little calmer.

​Not Kratos…

No matter who or what he impales, crushes or eviscerates, there isn’t a moment when Kratos shows any sign of calming just a little bit. He actually seems to get progressively angrier. I don’t know about you, but if I literally pulled someone’s head off, there would be a tiny release of some of that built-up rage. I might want to sit down somewhere quiet and think things through… maybe take a walk and reassess…

Kratos doesn’t relax, even for a second, because there is no release. The man behind the scenes is someone most likely sat cross-legged, held fast in a straightjacket, inside a padded room. He can imagine all the terrible things he would do to with beasties, fictional or otherwise, but he’s not actually able to deal with the real problem. Whatever that is…

3) The mythology is all over the place.

Call it what you want: poetic license; a touch of creativity here and there; the writer’s own interpretation of Greek myths. There’s no denying that the GoW series has taken Greek mythology and dropped it in a blender. To me at least, it’s easy to see the events of each game for what they are – visions formed from a mind that has absorbed, enjoyed and even obsessed over Greek myths, but hasn’t fully remembered or understood all of it. The myths are so muddled, so mixed, that it must surely be a deliberate message to the audience.

There is only one Minotaur in Greek mythology, and there’s only one Cerberus, yet Kratos sees them everywhere, all around him, wherever he goes.

The big, flashy Pandora’s Box in God of War 1 that super-sizes Kratos is… well it’s all wrong. In design, origin and purpose. It wasn’t even a box in the myth – it was a jar.

Finally, the mystery ‘patient’ himself has Kratos all wrong. There is an actual Kratos in Greek mythology, and he’s already a God – the God of Strength and Power. The ‘real’ Kratos also had wings… which would sort out that pesky double-jump problem.

4) It’s all a bit convenient.

The only GoW game I haven’t played is Ascension. My main question when I eventually play that game would be: “Is there anyone new left for Kratos to bump into?” Sure, it’s an origin story (sort of), but we always expect to see something new.

By now, the red and grey ball of rage has bounced around every corner of Ancient Greek mythology. Inaccuracies aside, the number of famous people, gods and creatures Kratos has come into contact with is remarkable. I struggle to recall anyone (or anything) that Kratos has not met, murdered or… mounted.

In the first GoW, Kratos was a Spartan leader affiliated with the original war god, Ares. By the end of God of War 2 Kratos is the son of Zeus and is best buds with the Titans. By the end of God or War 3 Kratos has butchered pretty much ever big-league god on Olympus.

​Then there are those moments where you turn the corner to find another random person plucked from Greek mythology, for no apparent reason…

Kratos: “Oh hey, Perseus, what are you doing here?”

Perseus: “I’m a boss battle!”

Kratos: “Oh… weren’t you the demigod who really killed Medusa and pulled her head off.”

Perseus: “……..I’m a boss battle!”

The reason, of course is simple, it is not enough for the ‘modern day Kratos’ to fantasise about taking on Ares, Zeus and the other gods. In his mind, he is at the centre of all Greek mythology. He is the most important man in the room. He will eventually be the only man in the room, the way he’s murdering his way through the cast list.

5) Read between the lines

​ When you begin to see that these games are little more than the imaginings of a tortured mind, you begin to see the signs. The ‘relationship’ he has with Zeus can be attributed to deep-seated father issues. The way every single person in the game seems to betray him or try to kill him: clear signs of abandonment. The chains that bind his arms reveal his feelings towards the asylum that holds him. I’ve played the demo for Ascension, so I know that Kratos begins his story chained up, before breaking his shackles and setting himself free.

Plus, think for amount about the sheer amount of breasts in every game…on almost everything. Freud would have a field day.

All of this, in my mind, paints a very clear image of who the ‘true Kratos’ is.

Your thoughts?

Which is more insane: Kratos, or my theory?

Have you seen anything else in the series of games that confirms or counters my ideas?

Are you upset that I have potentially spoilt the end of the God of War story??

I don’t own a Wii U, and I have only recently become the owner of a 3DS. This means that my knowledge of more recent Super Mario games is limited. Last week, I discovered a startling fact about Super Mario 3D World – this time Bowser does not kidnap Princess Peach.

Now this may not have made waves with you, but I… well I was appalled. How could this happen? How could Bowser do this to Peach? After all they have been through? And after everything that Mario has done for him?