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Monday, November 7, 2011

Monday Miscellany

I NEVER REALIZED. . . .

Last week on "Colbert," food journalist and perennial killjoy Michael Pollan offered a simple maxim for healthier snacking: "If you're not hungry enough to eat an apple," he said, "you're not hungry."

Apparently, I have NEVER been hungry in my life! Who knew?

***************************************************THE CRANKY KILLER

Wilford Brimley has been hawking diabetes supplies for, like, thirty years and counting. Kinda makes you wonder how fatal the disease really is.

*************************************************AT LEAST NOVEMBER HAS ONLY 30 DAYS

Last November brought us NaNoWriMo, annoying shorthand for "National Novel Writing Month." The idea, propagated by people with way too much time on their hands and way too much faith in the creative capabilities of the online public, was that people should, in one month, write a novel. Didn't have to be good (I think Dan Brown's last book was a NaNoWriMo project), didn't have to be published, didn't even have to make sense (see again, Dan Brown). Success was simply a question of unleashing one's creative spirit.

Apparently, this proved too difficult.

This November brings us the far-filthier sounding NaBloPoMo--National Blog-Posting Month. The idea here is that people commit to writing a blog-post a day, every day this month.

Pardon me while I wax sardonic.

WOW! A blog-post EVERY day! For a whole MONTH! Insanity! How can these faceless NaBloPoMoHos expect ANYONE to generate a whole THOUGHT every day, much less express it in the form of sentences and (shudder) paragraphs! I implore people NOT to try this. A post a day for a whole month--no human mind can be expected to generate such quantities!