Riker (os): What the hell did happen with this goddamn shuttle?
O’Brien: Do you know that story about an Emergency Landing Plan B on the Enterprise-A?
Riker (os): Yes....
O’Brien: It seems your Imzadi is not Hikaru Sulu.

Picard: What do you mean you won't perform fellatio? You have to! It's in your contract.
Crusher: Jean-Luc, just because you're captain doesn't mean you have the authority to outsource our Starfleet commission renewals to the Ferengi Commerce Authority.

Riker: Now my dear, this will make all your desires come true.
LaForge: (whispering urgently) Commander! That's not a vibrator!

Present Picard: So... replace Geordi's visor with ocular implants, arrest Soran at the Armagosa Observatory, the Borg are coming for Earth again, the uniform thing... Anything else?
Future Picard: Don't send Data on the team to puncture the warp core coolant tanks. That should-
*The connection cuts out*
Present Picard: Data, what happened?
Data: It seems the Enterprise-E no longer exists, possibly due to the information we were provided.
Present Picard: I see... well, at least they gave us the specs for those stylish uniforms!

Picard: "Tell José he'll get his chilli peppers when we get there! Tell him they're prime Mexican Reds; I hand-picked them myself! But he won't die if he goes a few more days without them!"

Worf: "Yes. Yes! Twirling it does make me look sinister!"

Picard: "Beverly, I think it's time we made some changes in our routine. After all, most of the crew already think we're sleeping together after dinner every night, and not just playing Parchessi."Crusher: "So, you're suggesting we set up the Parchessi board in Ten Forward instead of here in your quarters from now on?"