Me: "Hey. Check [this photo] out. It's me and Alex eating grits for the first time."
Elliot: (looks) "Is that white crap grits?"
...
Elliot: "What are the Giants' colors? Orange and black?"
Me: (pause) "Who are you asking?"
Elliot: "I know a lot of people that would be disappointed in us right now..."

I can't believe he asked me about team colors. I'm the last person you'd want to ask.