you are the only person with this opinion and its honestly the reason i asked the question in the first place. because i know it is completely morally correct to tell him but as his ex girlfriend i know he will just blow it off as false information. i realize he should make his own mistakes but it is very hard to just let someone you love get herpes, especially when people you barely know are approaching you and telling you this after you only told one person a name and then it blows up in your face.

im not saying i don't agree with you. i fully agree with you.... just repeating what i was told. plus this whole bashing OP because people gossip to her is not the point of this thread. the point was to get advice on how to phrase telling someone that the person they are seeing has herpes.

I guess maybe a better question is how do I tell him? I fell like this is a super delicate situation because he will either 1. think I'm trying to sabotage the relationships or 2. not care because he's last words to me where "i don't care I'm done with this shit"

edit: and I've already ruled out telling his best friend because i think there is a chance his best friend wouldn't reciprocate the information

I know we are not speaking but I was approached with a situation that I cannot ignore. I was not asking for this information it was given to me and to be honest I wish I was never told this. Multiple men in (lets say bob)'s fraternity have approached me to tell me that the girl you are seeing has confirmed genital herpes. You don't have to believe me or ever talk to me again but I cannot keep this on my conscious and play STD god. I had to tell you for your health and for your security clearance into the (military detail). I'm sorry this had to come from me I'm sorry I even had to get involved. I honestly really hope that the 4 men who slept with her and told me this were wrong but ____'s best friend told us he found a prescribed herpes medication with her name on it while they were on a cruise together so that's why he and I decided we were obliged to tell you.

honestly...to incur judgement... just the rough estimate he told me. and actually quote he told me was that his roommate asked how many people she had slept with and she started counting to 9 on her fingers and said "well thats the hockey team"

see i was going to tell him exactly how i knew so that he would take it more seriously, because i don't even know this girl, he's only known her for a week and a mutual friend of both he and I told me who she was while she was blacked out drunk.