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Ok. Stop the presses here. I just finished listening to this entire video, and I have to say, that if this testimony is true (and I see no reason to doubt it) there is a lot that we can all learn from this young girl.

I’m going to offer a brief synopsis of the most important points, and then provide my interpretation of this important testimony.

To make a long story short, the Lord God decided to make this girl dead for a while, in order to bring her on a fairly comprehensive tour of both heaven and hell. The Lord God himself served as tour guide. She found him to be very handsome. According to her testimony, however, he was not a very happy God, as evidenced by the fact that he spent a whole lot of time crying during her visit. But I’ll get to that later. The whole purpose of this tour was to give this kid the message to go back to earth to beseech the living to do the stuff that is important to the Lord God.

Apparently, there is a whole lot of misinformation here on earth about the stuff that the Lord God wants us to do. This testimony was really jam-packed with info, but let me give you some of the highlights.

After a brief intro, the handsome Lord God took her against her will to hell, to witness the suffering going on down there. And let me tell you, it is really bad. Worse than anything you can imagine. The demons are very very busy, creating individualized torture for the thousands of fallen human souls down there. And these demons have DARTS with your name on them. They also do things like set folks on fire, and then create something that looks like rain, and all the wretched souls run towards the rain, only to find that it is come chemical that makes the burning fire sting even more. So it is psychological and physical torture. Can you imagine?

The kid saw her great grandmother there, begging the Lord to forgive her. But He just cried, and said it was too late. Apparently, during her life, great grandma had some trouble with forgiveness. So in spite of the fact that it made Him weep, the Lord just couldn’t forgive her once she was dead.

There were a lot of other folks in hell too. Pope John Paul II was there. When the kid asked why, pointing out that he offered masses and prayed to the Lord, God pulled down a magical screen, and showed the kid that he took a lot of money from his masses, and also that he fornicated with nuns. I have to admit, I did not know this.

Michael Jackson was there too. He, apparently, had made pacts with demons in exchange for fame.

More importantly for this Ecuadorian girl’s Latin American audience, was the fact that Selena was there. Now if you weren’t hanging out with young Latin Americans in 1995, when the young up and coming singer was murdered, you might not understand the significance of this. But I’ve got to tell you, this woman was loved. Almost worshipped. The Lord God did not say explicitly what she had done to merit eternal damnation, but I’m guessing it had something to do with scanty clothes and suggestive lyrics. Selena took the time to talk to our young protagonist, and tell her that Selena suffers EVEN MORE every time someone on earth listens to one of her songs, and Selena herself begged that no one ever listen to her music again.

Now if you don’t want to cause poor dead Selena any additional pain in hell, don’t watch this video. But it has gotten almost 9 million hits already, so if you want to take a little peek, I mean, you won’t be the only sinner out there.

The poor kid’s tour of hell continued, and she was dismayed to see a little 8 year old boy suffering there. “But why Lord?” she beseeched. The Lord explained that this kid played video games and watched Pokemon (who apparently are demon-inspired), and was subsequently disrespectful to his parents. His parents didn’t use the rod. Apparently the Lord really wants parents to use the rod on disobedient kids. And this kid has to suffer for all of eternity, since his parents didn’t hit him enough. Who knew? The Lord wept some more. He spent a lot of time crying.

Upon completion of the hell-leg of the tour, the pair ascended into heaven, where you will be pleased to know that everyone is very youthful. Like 15 year olds. Who wouldn’t want to be 15 for all of eternity?

They ran into lots of the Lord’s favorite historical characters during this leg of the tour. Even though they were all 15 year olds, she knew who they all were. They ran into Solomon and Mary Magdalene and Sarah. They also ran into Mary, the mother of God. The Lord was very clear that Mary doesn’t know anything about stuff going on here on earth, and that those who worship her are wasting their time. You have to worship Him, not her.

Here are some more random things this kid learned on the heaven-leg of the tour:

• The Lord will lovingly refer to you and his followers as His Servants in heaven• There angels in heaven engage in construction projects – there is manual labor in the afterlife• God wants us to pass out leaflets about Him• The Lord still has scars on his hands, and they won’t go away until everyone loves Him.

Then the Lord said it was time to send her back to her family. She protested, (which didn’t anger the Lord a bit!) and said that she wanted to stay with Him. He said that she had to return to her family. Having spent so much time in the afterlife, the kid had forgotten all about the existence of her family. But the Lord showed her her body on earth, and he family members, and then she remembered.

He took her to a crystalline river of living water, and told her to submerge herself, and she was even happier than she had been before. After a bit of a dispute about the fact that He wanted her to return to earth and she didn’t want to go, He showed her babies disappearing from the wombs of women, and screaming and pre-rapture stuff that I admit I really didn’t understand, with people running around and getting into accidents. The Lord started crying again, and explained that all of these poor souls were going to be left behind when He returns to earth, unless this kid does a really good job of promoting her story on youtube.

At the end of the video, we see the young girl has grown into a young woman, and is now filling up stadiums telling people her story. The Lord still talks to her, and asks her to tell folks that He is coming RIGHT AWAY for His holy people. She has, it appears, been influenced by all of the crying that the Lord did in heaven, and has trouble telling His story without weeping herself.

I think maybe we should take this testimony seriously. Hell looks really bad, and even though some of us will be servants and manual laborers in the celestial afterlife, it sure beats the alternative.

And what possible motive could this girl have to make this up? It is too specific to be a fantasy or illness induced illusion. And she just seems really credible.