Danica's Fast Start

Danica Patrick's secret weapon is the competitive training she received as a kid. It's just one way a father can give his child a push

May 12, 2009

Danica Patrick was in danger, and it was all her father's fault. She was 10 years old, and he'd just plunked her into her debut race at a makeshift track around the parking lot of his Illinois glass company. He'd bought some go-karts and encouraged his girls to have at it. But he forgot to insert a pin into Danica's brake, and so, five laps in, with the speedometer at 25 miles per hour, her kart was nearly out of control.

All her father, T.J., could do was watch.

"I should've kept turning," Danica says to him now, as they sit together at a picnic table in the California desert.

"You could've," he answers. "But you didn't know that yet. You were 10 years old!"

She crashed. But instead of slamming into the back end of a parked tractor-trailer -- a decision that might have resulted in a decapitation -- she intentionally veered into her father's building and walked away unscathed and unfazed. That was when T.J. Patrick knew his daughter could develop into a fearless competitor.

What matters most, though, is what T.J. and his wife, Bev, did next: They encouraged their child to focus her talent and toughness on a goal. Standard parenting stuff, right? Now try giving your kids the freedom to pursue those goals, regardless of where their decisions take them and what risks may be involved. That can be frightening.

But the Patricks did it. When 16-year-old Danica was dominating the national karting scene, they sent her to England -- alone -- to compete on a professional karting circuit. She spent 3 years there learning to rely on her wits and instincts, and focusing on a goal as ambitious as she was: shattering racing's sex barrier and becoming known as a great driver, not simply as a great female driver. She'll continue that worthy quest at the Indianapolis 500 on May 24.

Here, T.J. and Danica show how you can enable your children to blaze their own paths.

Foster a fighter
It didn't matter if Danica was competing in a girl's or boy's world (and she did both), because T.J. taught her how to win no matter the circumstances: Focus, fight fair, and learn your opponent's weakness. And she did. "Say you're a teenage boy playing football," Danica says. "Then some girl takes you down? There goes your ego."

Strategize, don't criticize
"I never want to hear criticism," says Danica, "but I am open to input." So as your child tries to improve at something, remind him or her that you're both in this together. Then help strategize ways to improve, without harping on past failures. That'll foster your kid's independence at the same time as they're learning from you.

Focus on their interests first
When you recognize your children's potential, voice your support and back it up with your wallet. They need new challenges in order to thrive -- and that means you're buying a new guitar, signing them up for classes or a new gym, or driving them to games. As Danica did, children will push themselves hard if given the opportunity.

Let them loose
Danica is busy and highly independent, but that doesn't mean she's drifted from her parents. T.J. just needed to figure out ways to stay active in her hectic life -- so he oversees her Web site and drives her bus. To her, that's a huge support. "There's no better person to drive our bus," Danica says. "He does blow out a lot of tires, though."

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