Rich Tong Finally Cleans Out His Desk At Tumblr

After a year of serving as Tumblr’s Fashion Director, I am excited to announce that I’ll be leaving to pursue other independent opportunities.

The fashion community on Tumblr has grown tremendously in just a year, starting with only a handful of industry leaders and quickly expanding to over 200 of the world’s most creative fashion publications, designers, brands, photographers, models and stylists. Their presence has given way to the most incredible opportunities for this community’s young, emerging talent, and I am ever so thankful for having had the opportunity to work with each and every one of them.

It’s been an extraordinary learning experience working with such a world-class team at Tumblr, and I look forward to all of the amazing developments they have planned for the coming years.

He doesn’t state what these “independent opportunities” are, but since he has barely shown up at the tumblr offices for the last month we assume he’s been busy kissing Nina Garcia’s cheeks hoping for a job at Elle or something.

The main lol in this goodbye post is Rich’s implication that he had any major role in creating good relationships within the fashion industry. He is now famous for pissing off many people by selectively sucking only the teats he deems worthy of his attention. His notorious tumblr Fashion Week stunts have been almost universally panned as publicity fiascos of the lamest order. His blatant pimping and promoting of fashion/style tumblr users who are his personal friends is also no secret.

Tong’s departure is no loss for tumblr or for the fashion community. Perhaps now he will slink back to a web development job where he belongs, and stop trying to be the arbiter of internet fashion. The bigger question is, how will he be able to snag another model girlfriend without the impressive “I can make you famous on tumblr” pick up line?

Perhaps the worst use of “I am excited to announce…” ever. This guy must be a blast at funerals.

Why doesn’t the old guy John Maloney mentor these kids? Sure, it’s fun to laugh at the stupid things Karp says in the NY Times and LA Times, and it was fun to watch Tong faceplant. It was super fun to watch topherchris blog his cock — who didn’t want to see that? And HEY GUYS, don’t even get me started on Poundcake.

The “such a world-class team at Tumblr” line rings particularly hollow. It’s not like Google and Facebook are desperately trying to poach these shitheads.

I read some post on his Tumblr a while back saying that people’s complaints about Tumblr don’t worry him because “at least they’re still talking about it.” Basically, he said that he’s not all that concerned about the company’s missteps or its future because if people are upset enough to talk about it on their blogs, etc. then that shows they’re somewhat invested in the platform which is what really matters. I’m not sure this “any publicity is good publicity” philosophy works as well on the internet, when it’s so easy for another platform to rise up and do everything Tumblr does and then some, and do it competently too.

Aww I sorta feel sorry for him. Must be hard to fail so spectacularly in the public eye. But more importantly, few things creep me out more than camera phone self portraits in a mirror. Please stop doing that, men.

They are the worst. It’s okay though because it weeds out about 50% of Ok Cupid profiles. I love the dudes whose only photos are mirror cell phone self-portraits. You might as well wear a sign that says, “I am both creepy and never leave my house.” UGH.

It also says:
I was taking a dump when I thought of this self-portrait idea.
This is actually part of a series in which I explore my body. in a room with a toilet.
Play your cards right and I’ll show you the full monty pic. Well, who am I kidding, just ask for it.
Posing and snapping a pic at the same time is not something I am good at. Behold my puzzled squinty face as I try to make two objects appear in focus at the same time.

I really hate the goodbye annoucements. Say nothing. Anyone in your entire industry knows whether you left, were laid off, or were fired, so spinning it in such an asshattery way looks immature and ridiculous.

What do these people do during a breakup? Write a novella of fake appreciation?

Oh god, those apartment pics were the grossest things ever! And his now-ex would sit around naked on his bare, sheet-less mattress, probably covered in dog hair. Gross. Just washing his hair would be a start at least.