Other Stuff

1. NICKNAMES:If Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle go out for lunch, they willcall each other Emma, Suzanne, Debra and Michelle.

But if Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack go out for a pint, they willaffectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,Peanut-Head and Useless.

2. EATING OUT:When the bill arrives, Mike, Phil, Rob and Jack will each throw in$20, even though the bill is only for $22.50. None of them willhave anything smaller, and no one will actually admit they want changeback. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

3. MONEY:A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he really wants.A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't really want.

4. BATHROOMS:A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn.The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items,and would be afraid to REALLY know what they are for.

5. ARGUMENTS:A woman has the last word in any argument.Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

6. FUTURE:A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

7. SUCCESS:A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

8. MARRIAGE:A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.9. DRESSING UP:A woman will dress up to: go shopping, water the plants, emptythe garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail.A man will dress up for weddings, funerals.

10. HAPPINESS:To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and lovehim a little.To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try tounderstand her at all.

11. LONG LIFE:Married men live longer than single men, but married men are alot more willing to die.

12. MISTAKES:Any married man should forget his mistakes.There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.13. NATURAL:Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.Women somehow deteriorate during the night.14. OFFSPRING:Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knowsabout dentist appointments and romances, best friends, andfavourite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguelyaware of some short people living in the house.15. UNDERSTANDING:There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman,before marriage and after marriage.