just another day

Fairly certain anyone i used to know here isn't here or doesn't remember me...a casualty of the rapidly cycling nature of this place I guess. To be fair, I can't believe I'm back here...and I don't know that I want anything from here. I've been around enough to know now that this doesn't get better...you just exist until you can't anymore. then you do something about it. and hard to believe i'm back to where i was 2 years ago when i was lightyears away from where i am now, but in the same position. ready to give up. overwhelmed and without a soul to talk to.

I agree - this doesn't get better. Hanging on doesn't get you anything except hanging on. So why do I do it? Because it's all I know. I have nothing to look forward to and haven't for a very long time. There is no one who cares whether I live or die - despite the silly, plastic sentiments of people who automatically say they "care" without knowing anything about me. I don't try to tell others here what to do or how to feel. All I can do is to tell people who haven't been in this place as long as I have that there are no real exits. I've known many people who tried therapy, but I've never known anyone who was helped by it. So far as I can tell, the best you can hope for from therapy is that it can take your mind off things while you're actually with the therapist. So can watching television. Neither activity is going to heal you. For some people, life simply is no good. That's a fact.