60 Shades of Grey: Why Women are Going Grey Gracefully

Most women over 60 will at some point find themselves dealing with grey hair. While this is a natural part of the aging process, some women still find it hard to let go of their “original” hair color, and resort to dyes, highlights or other methods to avoid going grey.

On the other hand, there are also plenty of women who seem to be embracing the change in their hair color and are going grey gracefully!

There are many reasons for this, and the trend of going grey naturally is an encouraging sign in many ways. It is a reflection of how women over 60 can change their self-image for the better and accept themselves for who they are and how they look.

Are You Going Grey Gracefully?

This is a surprisingly emotional topic, with strong opinions on both sites of the “grey hair debate.” If you decide to grow out your grey hair, you may get pushback from some women in your life. We recently posed a question to our community: “Are you ready to stop dyeing your hair?” Nearly half of the women who responded were very firm in saying, “I am never going to go grey.” The other half were passionately supportive of grey hair.

Personally, while I still dye my own hair, I have to admit that my grey-haired sisters make some excellent points in support of going grey naturally. Here are a few of them…

Grey Hair Can Actually Make You Look More Vibrant

If you do decide to go grey, you don’t have to feel self-conscious about it – the standards of fashion are changing. We don’t have to feel limited by outdated stereotypes that “grey hair = old.”

The way you think and act is what makes you look old (or not), not the color of your hair. In the same way that balding men often look better and “younger” after fully shaving their heads than they did with thinning hair, many women who go grey paradoxically look “younger” than they did before – because they look more like their truest selves without any artificial enhancements.

Going Grey Saves Money

The average woman who colors her hair spends $330 per year on hair dyes and accessories – and most women spend approximately $50,000 on their hair during their lifetimes. If you do decide to go grey, be sure to get a great cut and use grey hair conditioners for shine.

Going Grey Expresses Your Individuality

Many women are going grey as a statement of independence and confidence. They are telling the world, “this is who I am, and I’m not afraid.” Many women who have gone grey say that they get more compliments from men, because their grey hair shows greater confidence.

Whatever you decide to do with your hair – whether you keep coloring it or decide to go grey naturally – don’t worry about being trendy – just be you.

Are you going grey gracefully? Or, do you still dye your hair? What motivates your feelings on this question?

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Margaret Manning is the founder of Sixty and Me. She is an entrepreneur, author and speaker. Margaret is passionate about building dynamic and engaged communities that improve lives and change perceptions. Margaret can be contacted at margaret@sixtyandme.com

Good question! I was letting my colour grow out but grew tired of the blonde/grey mix so yesterday I bleached out the old colour then dyed it steely grey to match my own grey. I love it!! Now to change my make- up to compliment it.

I would love to not worry about the upkeep and the expense of covering and hiding the grey. However, I am still in the business world, and ageism is real. I do not believe going grey would be welcomed in my professional world. Some day when I leave the working world behind!

I would love to go grey just to eliminate the constant upkeep of the coloring! Every 2 weeks I see roots peeking out. I color my hair myself which means a light brown at least evey 3-4 weeks. Heavy blonde highlights a few times a year. A constant project. Just not ready to go grey though. I am thinking about the idea of it so the seed has been planted. Who knows. I love a really short textured grey haircut so HUMMMMM??

I grew out my hair for the past 6 months and it has grey in it but I just don’t look good with it. It ages me. It detracts from my appearance. Makes me feel older and depresses me some. Easier to care for when I don’t color. I have started back into coloring again. The color isn’t right yet, but I probably feel better and look better. Coloring is a pain and is expensive. At some point I will stop coloring but right now will try coloring to enhance how I feel about my appearance. There are plenty of people who would say that I don’t look good whether I color or not but I am doing it for me because I feel better with color.

Since I had my daughter late in life and I was early to grey, I have been dying it since I was in my thirties. I didn’t want to look “older” than the other moms in her elementary school. Now, kids grown and gone, I am seriously thinking of letting it be natural, which now is white. Then I want some purple highlights put in! I think it will look smashing!

Grey is in fashion this year and if one puts in a few highlights it looks quite trendy, I get lots of compliments with my lavender highlights. A good haircut and good conditioner is also important, I use to colour it most of my life and now I really like it naturally silver.

I just talked to my stylist this morning about growing in my grey. She is going to slowly. Do lowlights and highlights until it grows out. I will then see how I like it. I’m certainly not ashamed of it and with a great haircut I think grey hair can look awesome.

I’ve done it a couple of times, my husband loves my grey. Grey hair on women with blue eyes always looks great and they look younger. Brown eyes to me, and I am, I feel it makes me look old. Haven’t colored in quite awhile, and am also letting my hair grow out, , not sure if I’m going to color or not . I wish it would go all silver, I’d love that!!!

My long straight thin hair is graying at its own pace, just as it has been since I first had any at about three years old. I am almost 68 & intend to keep it natural, untreated by harsh chemicals or hot water. If it ever thins away completely I will return to my baby Buddha baldness & trade my sun visor for a sun hat if I am outdoors in my tropical home.

I will be 67 on the 24th of this month. I stopped coloring about 13 years ago. I traveled a lot for my job then. Didn’t have the time to color and perm, as we do to straighten curly hair. So I had to decide to do one or the other. I permed, let the roots grow, then cut it short, silver and curly. I later stoped allowing it curl naturally, blew it straight and have been wearing it silver and spiked for more than 10 years. Get loads of compliments, especially from men. ;-)

I’m staying with the grey. I still have lots of light brown color and my grey is actually pure shiny white. It’s now giving me a streaky look. Young teen girls have told me the color is perfect and they are the experts! Lol.

love my white hair kept it long till couple mths ago,so,icut it myself,coulored the fringe bit red,the coulor wasnt what was on the box,so i did it purple because my hair is white the coulor is very vivid,but as its washing out its perfect.next im going mauve,i flick it back like a longer short back and sides. i love it. by the way im 73 so no young chick.lol.i have to use a triwalker wheni go out but,im not getting old yet.lol

I used to colour my hair, but didn’t particularly like the fact it had to be done over again. So now even though I am 68 I have grey streaks, an inheritance from family who don’t go grey all over but I am hopeing to have the beautiful snow white hair my Mum finally ended up with. Age gracefully and deny the cosmetic industry its exhorbitant profit. Spend it on yourself for a treat

I love my silver hair and get lots of compliments about it! And many younger people who say that they hope that their hair goes the same colour as mine when they stop dying it!
Stop dying your hair it costs a fortune and very often is far too dark for skin which is now lighter too !!

Just let it go gray 6 weeks ago. Sick of dying it. I haven’t seen my own hair for over 40 years. I am having to reassess my wardrobe, because earth tones and white/gray hair don’t really work. I feel very liberated!

I stopped coloring my hair two years ago when I retired at 60. I honestly didn’t know what color it would be, there are very light silvery areas but the best word to describe it would be a light champagne color. I love it!!!

I am 63 and decided to quit completely coloring my hair a long time ago. I hated messing with getting the roots touched up. Now it is a dove grey on top and sides. Still brown with red highlights (natural) in back halfway down. Ever once in a while I put some small highlights of platinum blond with one big streak of purple! Hey everyone knows I have grey hair so why not go wild once and a while

Mine was pure white in front with some gray in back, but it’s changing. I had spinal fusion in May, and it had started having a blondish color lately. Meds? Vitamins? I don’t know. But I do know that my father’s hair started growing black again after he had radiation. I’ll wait and see what happens.

Grey! I will be 60 next month. I decided it was time about 9 months ago and have never regretted it. I have 5 granddaughters and I want to set a good example of being proud of who you are. The 16 year old told me recently that she loved it – that it made me look more powerful, strong and self-assured. I rest my case.

Because we have better things to do with our lives and time than playing with hair color. Once you start doing it, you always have to fight that root problem, and it often looks so unnatural when women with aging in their face try to keep their youthful hair color.

I’m 65 and still have my natural brown hair with a few strands of gray and looking forward to when my hair is all gray. I feel a bit cheated that I don’t have a lot of gray. It must be all that black tea I’ve been drinking since I was 6 years old.

Have been told mine is Salt & Pepper. I had it all cut off to grow it natural , I got fed up with having to colour every 5-6 weeks, I got so much earache from friend and family saying the grey makes me look old that I started to colour again. I really regret it, it’s now longer that it was before I had it cut, half way down my back :-( . By the way I’m 62.

i stopped years ago, im 62, and lucky i had my fathers coloring, light brown,blondish highlights it turned silvery around my face framing it, and thru my hair, ive had women ask me where i have my hair done, i tell them its natural now.

Yes that is what I am wondering at the moment. If I dye my hair it will look artificial. I have been having streaks in my hair for years but now you can’t tell if I have them or not. So maybe going grey gracefully is what I should do.

I will probably color as long as I can afford it and am able to get to the salon. I can’t imagine myself gray, although there are many women who do look good gray. I don’t think it would do much for me.

I’d love to embrace the “platinium”, however society does treat those who have contributed verily to life, flirted with danger and dance merrily as they ease on down the yellow brick with a nasty ignorance instead of valued members on life-long journeys. Light Ash Brown for me, again.

I will be 60 next month. I always had dirty blonde hair and died it most of my life since I was about 15. I got so very tired of the upkeep and the cost and decided I would turn 60 with my natural color. I am fortunate that it is a beautiful silvery color. I get so many compliments on it. And I feel that it show my five granddaughters that it is ok to be who you are naturally – it is ok to be 60! Only downfall I have found is that the dye gave it a great deal more volume. But I don’t think I will ever go back to the dye!!!

I have a very light silver blonde put through my hair as my natural colour isn’t even. It’s patches of grey and silver, reminds me of a dalmatian dog lol. I have been lightening my hair since I was 13yr.

I let my hair grown in naturally for years and looked horrible because my white grew in spots instead of all over. I looked really old at the age of 50. Now I am 60 and have been dying my hair for about 4 years now and feel vibrant and look younger. I will continue to dye my hair until I see my roots all white everywhere and then I will think about it. ;)

One of my classmates showed up at our reunion full on salt and pepper, I honestly didn’t think she was with our group. I’m not ready yet , only 48. My moms is the most beautiful white , if I’m lucky when 74 I can have the same

I tried going grey , my friends paid me out and I realised why when I saw photos of myself. So I have gone back to a blondish colour , after being dark for most of my life. I think the trick is to wait until your hair is a ‘nice’ grey and then consider it again.

Noooo! I’ve been going grey since I was 18 and at 64 colour it, I have no intention of growing old gracefully. Min Sandria Pate Coombs I like you have used everything for my eye brows, Doll Cosmetics off QVC is good but I have just discovered Eeyko eyebrow gel off QVC and it’s great, not sure I’ve spelt it correctly, hope it helps you x

great comments…I was a blonde for years, but became very sensitive to hair color. I have been dye free for 5 years now and I love my silver hair. It was quite an adjustment and not always easy going through the transition. Gray hair isn’t for everyone and neither is dyed hair….how nice to have a choice!

Yes! I stopped about 6 weeks ago. Instead of waiting for it to grow in, I had the brown bleached out and am working on bringing in whatever colour is it. So far, its white & silver with darker hair in the back. I was so sick of dying it. I hadn’t seen my own hair for over 40 years! I have the brown eyes and dark eyebrows (with gray growing into them, I dye them. I love the dark eyebrows/white hair combo). I have red in my skin too as I have rosacea. I simply cover the red places and it is just fine. I love that I can go “natural” and ditch the dye. I will be 69 next month. Every person I meet seems to like it. My hubby does and my daughter asked me what took me so long! Whats really important that I love it!

I haven’t coloured my hair for over ten years and my hair is better for it. My natural grey is a lovely colour and my hairdresser said she would like to sell it! I get asked where I get the colour done and I get strange looks when I say it is natural grey.

I’ve got plenty of time to be GREY in the nursing home. Still looking for my single *Prince Charming* Yes, I said it. Single men over the age of 60yrs old are looking for someone that doesn’t have GREY hair.

Only time I ever colored my hair was when my husband got this big idea I should have deep purple “wings” instead of white ones, but the results came out as flame red–and it scared him and the boys so bad he raced immediately for a very dark brown to cover the results. They wanted me to stay with the brown, but I’d grown comfortable with the white wings so I just let it grow back then. My mother never colored her hair, and she still had a lot of pepper in her hair when she died at 97.5.

I will colour it until I pass this mortal coil. Gracefully be blowed. Never did anything gracefully in my life and don’t intend to start now. When I can’t do it myself, I will pay for it to be coloured. Purple if the fancy takes me.

Ever since I stopped colouring my hair I have had so many compliments. My husband loves it and lots of people have said it makes me look younger. I have fair skin & freckles and my hair is very short so that’s probably why. I love not using any more chemicals than I have to either and a big plus is saving money.

I love my silver streaks and threads! Only add a streak of pink or purple once in a while that completely washes out. Talk about freedom. Now all my hair color $ is spent on great styling products and excellent facials. Because it’s good skincare that really matters.

I’m 63 with below the shoulder length hair, and have been letting my blonde highlights grow out for eleven months now. Turns out I have platinum-colored gray in front and on the sides, much the color of the highlights I was getting before. The remainder, darker gray, blends in with my medium blonde natural color, so the transition has been relatively easy for me. I love the freedom going gray has given me, and the confidence to “own” my age. I am sure to get a good cut, though, as it is important, as well as conditioning. Must take care to avoid the “witchy” look! Lol

Mine is not about vanity as much as after an abusive 34 yr marriage where I was not allowed to think for myself I am now experiencing life….and that includes coloring my hair to suit my new freedom (I’ve been grey since 35 almost white hair since 40!!!)…now I am a reddish, saucy Auburn!! And I LOVE it as do all my friends!!!

Grey hair is NOT aging for me at 62. It requires a weekly “purple shampoo ” to stay silver. It must be well styled because of the texture and you must update your makeup for your hair color. Best of all, it feels great. I live in Manhattan on the Upper East Side and get many compliments on my silvery salt and pepper hair! I love my hair and am proud of it. It is part of loving yourself.

Your hair naturally matches your skin colour, so going grey ‘matches’ the fact that your skin colour is getting paler too – if you keep dying your hair it eventually looks very odd and Fake against your skin..Oh – and Obvious! – Gave up dying my hair two years ago and never regret it… can’t wait until it’s totally white! I’m a brunette and I will – *at last* have hair that’s akin to ‘Blond’ LOL :D

I stopped some time in my late 50s. . I streaked it until it became mostly blond, then at some point I just stopped. I wish it were white, but at least it isn’t the mousey grey. When I wash it, it’s a good very light color grey. I have thought of having brownish streaks…but it is too costly. I do not think anyone looks younger and I never did it to look younger. That’s in the person’s mind, and that is important too. What makes a person look younger is if you have a lot of energy and spirit. Then people don’t even think of you as an old man or woman, even if they know you are. My mom was blond until she died at 84. She hated my gray hair.

I have a Mail Pouch sign on a barn in the area that I live in and when I pass by I use it for a gauge. If it looks better than me, I know it’s time for some new paint on me….lol…but really my hair is white on top and sides and dark in back,so the blonde highlights it. Sixty-two and loving life !

Being naturally blonde it’s easier to keep the grey at bay. I do dye it but only every 3 months or so and in the Summer it goes very light anyway and the grey blends in. Don’t know if I have the courage to let nature quite take it’s own course yet.

lol…. Good for you Linda, I am now a wonderful salt and pepper, but at least it is honest…. and as I now have these lovely healthy grey curls falling onto my face it makes me look younger… lol…. lighter and brighter…

Mine has been white since I was 42. People always compliment me on it. One day I was in the supermarket and the lady in line behind me told me how beautiful my hair was, and then she asked me if it was my natural color. And I was thinking “huh?” Of yeah, I died it white 26 yrs ago – lol.

Last week I had all the colour cut out of my hair and went with a short pixie cut. I am whitish at the sides and salt and pepper on top. Friends and family have asked if I am ill and people in shops are treating me like an old lady. I admit defeat, I cannot stay like this; call it vanity or something else but there will definitely be streaks or full head colour shortly

My mum is 81 and has never dyed her hair and no Grey! Unlike me, plenty of Grey to dye but not 50/50 yet. It’s much harder for those of us with dark hair to switch to Grey, silver or white because it’s such a drastic change, whereas for some blondes it’s just a few shades different

I used Fancifull (remember that stuff) to cover my gray which was great! Once I decided to stop I didn’t have any high lights left except my own. I love my hair the way it is and I even got the guts to wear it long again.

I have not ever colored my hair. It is as natural as it will become; even with more lovely gray. The older years are the highlights of our lives as well as the highlights of our hair. Smiling is the greatest gift a Woman of Naturalness can give herself.

I stopped dyeing mine years ago when a friend paid a fortune to have the ‘salt and pepper’ look that mine was! What is wrong with getting older, hopefully it happens to everyone. Respect for those who do so gracefully.

I decided early this year to go eau natural, an easy thing as I’ve always been blonde. As the grey seemed to be blending with the blonde I thought I’d follow through. It’s taken time to get used to and to match all over but I’m pleased with the end result. My hairdresser’s been very helpful & supportive too. Can wear different colours now….added bonus !

Mary Dolson Vance, 1 way is to color the front a Very Light Sun Blonde. You can do this yourself. Most ppl go gray in front 1st. Just allow that to grow.
Maybe in a month or 2, use the same color, with your hair down & dry, use the color bottle tip to make streaks from root toward the ends. Use a very large tooth comb & comb that thru. It will look more blended & make it look natural as it grows.
There are Silver Shampoos out at Walgreens, that help keep it shinny while going thru this process.
If your hair is black or extremely dark, use a light brown for a while 1st. Then a light brown few months later. Move to a medium blonde then the last, step on to the suggestions I began with.
It’s about the best, most natural way if you don’t want a shock or don’t want to cut it.
Hope this helps. Take your time.

It’s tough to do when you are about 50% gray. I’ve quit doing a base color and am just doing highlights and occasional lowlights every other month. Seems to be working but it’s going to be a longer journey than I’d like. You also need to have a stylist willing to be on the journey with you. Love mine, Kelly M Burgess of Roswell, Georgia!

When I was younger I always said I would go grey gracefully, but then that time arrived and … well, here I am colouring and yes, it costs a fortune. I would love to embrace my grey but don’t have the courage to go through the growing out stage because I still work and it will look awful. I don’t get much help from the hairdressers, but then again they are not going to encourage it because they will lose a customer! I don’t want to cut it; it is very thick and more manageable longer – I have it shoulder length. Can anyone suggest a colour that will get me through this period?

I feel too drab and dowdy when I don’t dye my hair, especially in the winter. I’ve been dying it since I was 14 years old. I love the elegance of silver grey hair or white hair, but mine is neither. It’s really dark at the back and grey at the front and frizzy at the temples. I’ve embraced my vanity.

I tried it for a couple of years but I went back to my brown and feel a lot better. It will always be there for me if I want to go gray again. Probably will go gray when I can no longer color my hair by myself. Not going to pay someone to do that! ;)

I started to grey in my 20s, and wasn’t bothered by it. I suspect that was influenced by the fact that my mother and her mother both greed early and neither colored their hair.

Just after I turned 50, with encouragement from friends, I started coloring my hair and went back to my original brunette. I loved it, and noticed that others seemed to notice me more than when my hair was salt and pepper (mostly salt).

Then about 3 years ago, I stopped coloring my hair. It took close to 2 years to grow the color out. Now that I am back to grey, I love the results. And I still get noticed, and frequently get compliments.

There’s really only two type of people that wear grey hair well: Middle-aged Executives and women with few wrinkles, and beautiful faces. Anyone else looks “older and exhausted.” It’s the truth. WHY look haggard when you don’t have to?

Help I’m a young looking 61 year old I have olive skin and very dark brown eye. I am fed up of dyeing my hair is it possible to let my hair go grey and have the odd high/ low lights that could work. Any info would be appreciated xxx

I don’t like coloring my hair and I did leave it for over a year. I too got compliments but they were from other women which is nice but I colored it a few months back and It took years off. Grey is fantastic if you have a young looking face but if you don’t well let’s not g there. The lady on the front looks lovely but she looks her years.

I started going grey in my early 30’s. I have been coloring my hair since then. I’m 62 now and I think I will continue through my 60’s……but once I hit 70 I will probably go grey…..I didn’t know how I would do that transition gracefully but recently discovered one can go to a hairdresser and get grey highlights!!! So there won’t be any awkward growth line!

I don’t know. I’ve tried grey wigs which I love, but all my family laugh and say it makes me look older. I’ve ended up dark blonde with highlights as a step towards it…..but still not quite ready at 59 and a half!

My hair has never been a part of the many, many ways I’ve wasted time and life being unhappy with myself. I have never coloured it. I was happy when it was jet black, stick straight and shiny and I’ve been happy with all the various shades along the way. I get tons of compliments.

Theres grey and then there is grey. The lady in the photo has a gorgeous even sprinkling of grey mixed in with her original colour and this is lovely. If I was like this I would keep my hair natural. I have white in certain places and then a grey sprinkling and then my original colour. So not a good look. Hence I colour

I love my gray hair! But it’s a little strange because I haven’t gone completely gray because some of my hair is still the same color as it was before it turned gray! Some people think I actually frost it!

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