Sam Biddle

"Laughing at people talking about the internet decades ago" is one of our favorite video subgenres here at Gizmodo, and this specimen doesn't disappoint: a fatherly AT&T narrator explains the dangers of hackers. Look out! Your modem is under attack!

The video, entitled "Computer Security: You Make the Difference," hits all the same points that plague hacked companies today. Passwords can always be cracked, files can always be copied.

But you must appreciate the 90s depiction of the hacker, when the stereotype was a cunning scofflaw with a Marlboro hanging from his lips, rather than a 13-year-old asshole cursing at you via Xbox Live as he downloads Anonymous software. There's nothing glamorous about this hacker of the 90s. He's a solitary man—his dojo, the bare white walls of some gloomy basement. His eyes burn from the CRT. But look at his bone structure, and his manicured hair—he's no nasally loser, he's a criminal. Just skip to 2:25 to see the horror in his victim's face.