This week, theaterland has everything we could want: great gossip, gaggles of gays and a gorgeous guy guest appearing at Wicked.

THE INVESTOR VANISHES?

The vultures are slowing circling Rebecca, the new musical whose road to Broadway has had more twists and turns than a Victorian murder mystery: First an investor contributing a whopping $4.5 million mysteriously died. Then, this week, the New York Timessuggested the backer, one Paul Abrams, never existed.

The elusive money man gave up the ghost right when he was supposed to pony up the cash, yet there is no obituary, death notice or other verification of his death. Or his life, for that matter: No one—not even lead Rebecca producer Ben Sprecher—had ever met Abrams in person.

And the representative for Abrams’ estate—who goes by the single name Wexler—never speaks by phone and uses an email address that was just created last month.

Even more bizarrely (or, hilariously), Abrams supposedly died in England of malaria! (What, would leprosy sound too fishy?)

After postponing because of Abrams “death,” Sprecher finally announced yesterday rehearsals would start on Monday—even though it’s not clear if the $4.5 million has been found. The show must go on!

Or will it?

THE GREAT GAY HOPE

We homosexuals rallied behind President Obama in the 2008 presidential campaign like we’d only done for Garland before. Opening October 19 at the Abingdon Theatre Arts Complex, the new play The Austerity of Hope (left) centers on a group of queer friends as they juggle romance, work and money against the last election.

“I worked on the play during the historic election of Obama, so it felt natural to use this momentous event as a backdrop to the story,” playwright Dan Fingerman says. “That election awakened in my generation, especially for gays, a deep sense of responsibility and passion.” [The Austerity of Hope]

EVERYTHING’S COMING UP MERMAN!

A new musical about Broadway’s ultimate diva, Ethel Merman?

Oh, hells to the yes!

Set in 1970, Merman’s Apprentice tells the tale of fictional 12-year-old Muriel Plakenstein, who runs off to be a Broadway star and meets Merman, who takes the girl to a rehearsal for Hello, Dolly!, where Muriel sings for that abominable producer David Merrick. After hearing her voice, though, Merrick decides to mount an all-child version of Dolly.

An industry reading of this musical fable is set for next week, with Klea Blackhurst tackling the role of the formidable first lady of Broadway. Apprentice‘s music is by David Evans with book and lyrics by Stephen Cole, who was friends with Merman herself. But can an original score possibly compare to Merman classics like “Everything’s Coming Up Roses” and “There’s No Business Like Show Business”? [Playbill]

DEFYING BULLYING

What queen could refuse hunky straight jocks, gay-rights advocacy and Broadway showtunes? If you’re in New York, cgeck out the October 11 performance of Wicked, when proceeds will benefit both Dan Savage‘s It Gets Better project and ex-rugby stud Ben Cohen‘s StandUp Foundation.

Of course, Wicked, a young green witch taunted by classmates, is really the perfect show to host an event benefiting anti-bullying campaigns. (Cast members even recorded their own It Gets Better video below)

But don’t delay: Tickets, which include a post-show forum with Cohen, Savage and Wicked cast members, are only available through September 31. [Eventbrite]

That,s so sweet!!! And it does get better after you leave High School. You move to a Gay community or major city and you are so happy to be free. Free to love, free to enjoy all the benefits of the vicious back biting queens and queers that can be ten times more cruel than anyone from your childhood. Did I mention that it helps if your really hot. We queers have standards you know. Only lesbians can be fat and unattractive and still get laid. Make sure that you wear the right clothes, say the right things, and hang out with all the right people, that is very important. There are many sub-groups within the Gay world so I am certain that you will have no trouble fitting in. IT GETS BETTER !!!

Dumdum, it’s so cute how you totally live up to your name. Maybe one day you’ll stop hanging around in bars and you’ll learn that non-drunk gay people are actually great, but I’m thinking you’re probably too narcissistic and shallow for that. Oh well!

Sep 27, 2012 at 6:29 pm · @Reply ·

balehead

People are just making money from this…nothing’s really changing…how typical…

Sep 27, 2012 at 7:02 pm · @Reply ·

Dumdum

@RomanHans: I don,t hang out in bars anymore. I was in theater in San Francisco. I came out in 1975 and have lived in the Gay subculture for 37 years. I have been around the block at least twice. There are nice people everywhere but as a whole Gay men are vain superficial and have their little clicks just like High School. And aside from the pretty lipstick lesbians.you need to check out The woman,s music Festival in Guernville California. Don,t try to walk among them though, since you are male you might get your but kicked. There are exceptions to every rule of course. Have you ever been on a Gay cruise ship? Hey I love my people, but it is what it is.

Sep 27, 2012 at 8:04 pm · @Reply ·

Dumdum

@RomanHans: Post Script. I don’t drink or do drugs. Maybe did too much antacid in the 70s. How very presumptuous. And I was of course being sarcastic. Not all Gays are superficial, only about 72.3 percent.

Sep 27, 2012 at 8:15 pm · @Reply ·

PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID

@Dumdum: Are you sure you don’t do drugs? Your sentences. Are like telegrams. From. Raymond Chandler. On. Speed. STOP