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In God’s Timing

Sometimes I wonder if God gives us glimpses of our future. I painted this image back in 2005 before we had kids. I didn’t have anywhere to put it but I knew this painting was meaningful. I always felt God telling me that I will have a little girl one day. After having my two sons, I started to doubt that a baby girl would ever be in my future. I prayed and prayed…and prayed for a third kid, hoping for a girl. However, addiction was taking a toll on our marriage and I didn’t think my dreams of having a daughter would ever happen. I was heartbroken. I changed my prayers to ask God to take away any desire I have for another child and to be thankful for the two little healthy boys he already gifted John and me. Before long, my desire to have more kids was gone. This was July 2013.
Fast forward to August 2013, one month later. I was washing my hands and the strangest this happened. I heard a voice. It was a soft male voice. It whispered “Sarah, you are going to have your third child and it will be a baby girl. Just trust me. Trust me. Trust me. It will be the birth of this little girl that will bring John a spiritual awakening and free him from his past. Just trust me, trust me, trust me.” It was such a peaceful yet crazy experience. I didn’t think much of it when it happened and went on with my day. I have never heard a voice again.
In September 2013, John’s addiction became active and he left for rehab. Crushed doesn’t even come close to describe how I was feeling. I was so tired of addiction attacking our young family. One week into John’s treatment, I took a pregnancy test (because I was late…sorry guys, I know you don’t want to hear that.). Sure enough, I was PREGNANT. Seriously?!? We weren’t even trying to get pregnant. In fact, we were on our way to divorce. Why in the world would God do this to us? I was angry at God. Yet, I was super excited at the same time. Let’s just say I was one confused human. When the boys and I went to visit John at treatment, I brought the pregnancy test. Awkward. How did this become my life? Never did I invision handing my husband a positive pregnant test at a rehab facility.
Shortly after finding out I was pregnant, I remembered that male voice I heard the previous month. I chose to put my trust in the revelation I received and I still do. Life since that revelation has not been free of relapses and pain, but I am going to continue to trust God and that his plans are good.
This morning I pulled this painting out of our attic. It just happens to be PERFECT for Sawyer’s new room. Not only do the colors match perfectly with the color scheme (purple, black, gray, and white) but it kind of looks like Sawyer and our newest rescue dog, Corduroy overlooking my favorite beach (located in SAWYER, Mi). The thing I LOVE most about this painting is that it serves as a reminder that,
“God has perfect timing. Never early. Never late. It takes a little patience and faith, but it’s worth the wait.”
One day at a time.