This is Not Baby Tiger.

A DNA test proves Tiger Woods is NOT the father of the young boy above whose face first appeared on Kikster.com because his mother’s a filthy porn star who loves money. TMZ reports:

A source handling the situation tells TMZ the DNA test was performed in 2002, as part of “an ongoing child support battle.”
We’re told although the DNA test excludes Tiger, it establishes to a reasonable certainty who fathered the boy — a guy from Florida.

For the record, the boy is the son of Devon James (Link leads to NSFW photos.) who most Tiger purists still don’t consider a mistress in the official canon. Sort of like when producers tried to briefly replace Bo and Duke with Coy and Vance on The Dukes of Hazzard which further proves my theory the General Lee was a metaphor for butt sex. See? Nobody listens to me.

If the kid was proven not to be his in 2002 why are they still talking about this? I’d say it’s a long gone and buried debate. Of course, this way this bitch can get 15 more minutes just by telling the media some obscure shit and hoping no one does their research.

What about the emotional distress of having your false accusation blow up in your face? She doesn’t get anything for that? Do you know how difficult that is on a woman or anyone for that matter…I think tiger should step up on the humane part of it.

If she doesn’t summons Gloria Allred on this one, she better line up that kid for the Goonies sequel. Mama cant be a working girl forever ya know!