It’s an odd phrase which describes, I guess, the idea that you’re happy with who you are. Perhaps also happy with the way you look.

And it’s all too easy to think ‘I’d be all right if only I weighed a bit less, or didn’t get so anxious, or didn’t suffer from low moods’.

The thing is, there are some things you can change, but others you can’t.

No matter how hard you might try.

No matter how much you’d like them to change.

It’s over stuff like this that I’m sure it helps to practise acceptance. To take them as they are, and to build from this foundation rather than wishing and praying for change that’s unlikely to happen.

By all means plan, expect and work towards changing those things that you can and probably should re-jig.

But maybe it makes sense to simply accept with good grace those that you can’t?

They say that polite conversation should avoid sex, religion, and politics.

I trust we can include Moodnudges in the polite conversation category.

However, there’s just no getting away from the fact that, depending on when you read this, it’s either only a few hours until the 45th US President will be taking the oath of office, or it will all be over.

To be honest, California isn’t exactly teeming with Donald Trump supporters, part of which is explained by the fact that this part of the US has long been referred to as the Left Coast.

California traditionally votes Democrat.

But in the spirit of polite conversation, all I’d like to say on the matter is that once the election had taken place back in November, the fact that Mr. Trump was going to be in the White House was a done deal.

Some may not like it, but unless you’re a political activist, there’s frankly not a whole lot you can do about it other than accept it.

And isn’t there a parallel in general life with this?

I’m guessing that there may be certain things in your own life, as there are in mine, that aren’t entirely ideal.

There may be matters that you and I might wish were otherwise.

But although we may have the power to change some (and often, we do actually have more influence over more things than we may sometimes believe), there are probably others over which we have little control.

I think this is where practicing acceptance comes in, summed up nicely in what’s known as the Serenity Prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.

Makes you think, doesn’t it?

There’s a new President. Let’s get on, shall we?

By the way, I should recognise that since I’ve now brought up politics and religion, I’d better sign off before I break all three rules.

There’s the distinct possibility that today could be a perfect one for you.

How very lovely that would be.

Perfect days, however, tend to be few and far between. And far be it from me to rain on your parade but let’s face it, isn’t it more likely that this will be an average kind of day? Perhaps even a less-than-average one?

There are those who exhort us to spring out of bed every morning, determined that this will be the best day of our lives.

I’m sure it helps to keep a positive mind-set, if you can.

However I also think it pays to be realistic.

If you’ve had perfect (or almost-perfect) days in the past, you’re pretty certain to have them again in the future.

But not necessarily right here, right now.

So go ahead with your eyes open and make the most of what the day throws at you, remembering that within limits you still have a good deal of control over how you’ll feel at the end of it.

The predictive searching gizmo on Google is a revealing way to learn what other people think, as its suggested searches are based on what they’ve been looking for.

For instance, when I typed in ‘how to be’ just now, it informed me that the top four most common requests are: How to be happy, How to be pretty, How to be funny, and How to be good kisser. (On that last one, the top site returned suggests that it all starts with looking after your lips. Make a note: buy lip balm.)

The thing is, and it’s confirmed by the large number of volumes you’ll find in the Self-Help section of a bookstore or library, it seems we all want to be something we’re not. We’re unhappy so we want to be happy (understandably). We think we’re not pretty, so we want to be more attractive. We’re a bit serious so want to be funny. Or we worry we’re not a great kisser so we want to discover what we’ve been doing wrong.

I guess self-improvement is a natural human drive, but it’s a crying shame when this interferes with being comfortable with yourself.

Your life has made you the individual you are. It has shaped and moulded you, and there’s no-one on the planet who’s exactly like you: surely something to celebrate rather than regret?

Rather than wishing you were somehow different, why not tackle the day being glad that you’re you?

I watched a fascinating talk at Stanford last week, by the CEO of a start-up company called Strivr which is using virtual reality (hence the last two letters of its name) to train football players when they’re not actually on the field.

Players wear VR goggles and are suddenly in the midst of a game.

Apparently the effect is uncannily realistic, and Strivr is certainly doing good business, by all accounts.

One big takeaway for me was the CEO’s remark that in business everything always takes twice as long as you think it will take, and costs twice as much.

Funnily enough, I think something similar is going on with some concreting that’s happening near where I live.

I was told it would take about 10 days, but it’s now looking as if it will be more like three weeks.

And then of course there’s my book.

At the end of January I giddily said I’d have it published by the time February was out.

But of course, here we are – April – and I’m still not quite there.

(It’s getting pretty close now, though. I received the third proof yesterday, and once it’s been thoroughly checked, we should be able to give it the green light any day now.)

It seems to me that this “always taking longer than you thought” thing seems to be pretty pervasive in life.

Perhaps it applies to recovery from low mood, too?

Years of tracking mine have shown me that the way down can sometimes be quick and sudden, but the process of getting back up again often takes more time than you’d like.

I don’t think you can force it, but you can probably gently encourage the transition by building in small “nudges” every day, which is one of the principles behind my book, of course.

Today’s tip then?

Accept that recovery will take its time, but also reassure yourself that change is just about inevitable.