That’s right, Single Speed Stage Race World Championships. To be honest, we sort of designated ourselves. But that’s OK. It’s not like the UCI has been spending a lot of time preserving the soul of our sport (reference: 4X, dual slalom, disc brakes in ‘cross, UCI approval stickers for frames/components, video rights debacle, et MF cetera). Custom SS frame and pastel-hued SSSRWC jersey to the victors.

Kind of a poke at the UCI and kind of a poke at the increasing polarization found among die-hard advocates of rigid, suspension, 29′ers, single speeds, 1×10, 650b, vintage townies, replica townies and fixies. Too many people claiming their choice is THE choice. Too much category proliferation. Too many awkward acronyms (See? Irony!) Bottom line? They’re all bikes. But the winner of SSSRWC 2012 (which will be decided by 6 racing stages and one drinking stage) will receive a “manscape” (aka “boyzilian”) and the loser will be obligated to have the scraps glued to his face for the evening in some semblance of a fake beard. Or something equally hilarious (to everyone but the loser).