The Daily News...

Oh, okay, think the worst,and here’s some more ammunition for you:Everyone’s in a conspiracy against everyone else…(There!Happy?)

It is rumored that, in some parts,people still artificially name their children Mozart,in the hope that they will move often.

It is inevitable, but ture – no, I misspelled that,it should be ‘true’, it is inevitable but true…Well, maybe I should say, "it is inevitable but sad," yes, that’s it.He then continued, now satisfied with himself, and said,“It is inevitable, but sadly true, that, as soon as someonebecomes famous, they want to start talking about themselves.”

One guy’s conception of “how things go”he expressed thusly: “Find an idea you like,then fuck it till it don’t excite you anymore.”

Sunday Science Tip:Holding children high in the air when they are youngcan instill in them a deep love for the ground.

A chap wrote me and said he felt that, in many of my news items,I was specifically making fun of him.I responded, pointing outthat I did not even know him, and he wrote back saying,“Yes, and that makes it all the worse.”