When asked in an interview for AskMen.com whether he’d watch the show with his kids (his first child with wife Heidi Montag is due in October), the 33-year-old responded straightforwardly, “Hell no! They’d just lose brain cells. I’m trying to have really smart kids.”

Adds the former reality star, “With all due respect to Heidi and I, we cannot afford any less brain cells than they’re already starting with at the gateway.”

Regardless of what his son watches, though, the reality television path is one Pratt insists he won’t take, career-wise. “Definitely no on the reality TV route. That’s a no go. Not enough money in it!” he says.

The dad-to-be admits that while he doesn’t have a specific talent path in mind for his first child, he is keen on passing his love for Jiu-Jitsu on and “trying to make a superstar” out of his son.

“I’m definitely gonna try and see what they’re best at — I’ll try out everything from dance to chess to squash to fencing to hacking,” he says. “That’s one thing that I feel like I didn’t do — try more things.”

“I played soccer and baseball, and that’s all,” he continues. “But what if I had been the best at like, ballet? And I didn’t even know. I could have been a famous ballet dancer, like the Black Swan!”

He’s also a “Nervous Nelly” about what could happen, mentioning Jimmy Kimmel‘s son’s health scare and noting he just wants a healthy baby — regardless of baby’s sex.

“Who cares about gender? I just want my baby to be healthy and have a strong heart,” he says. “I was born blue and I probably lost a lot of brain cells that I definitely needed in the past few years of my life, so definitely just want a nice, chill birth for Heidi, no drama. No umbilical cord wrapped around its neck or anything.”

He continues, “Girl or boy, it would be off the hook. If it was a girl, we would have created a Ronda Rousey 2.0 but it’s a boy, so he’ll be the next Chris Pratt.”

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The star says he’ll probably take on a lot of the nighttime baby duties since he stays up late often and will “already be up,” joking that his responsibilities won’t include diapers.

And while the couple has “a lot of names in mind,” they haven’t decided on one for their son quite yet. In fact, they’ll be looking outward for inspiration.

“I plan on crowd sourcing on social media and maybe doing like an iPhone giveaway for whoever comes up with the name,” Pratt explains. “I’m gonna give them an iPhone 8 or something because I need a banger name. Heidi has her favorite, but I don’t think we can commit this early in the game.”

It’s probably safe to assume they’ll settle on a pretty unique choice, though. “I definitely want to be stunting on Gwyneth Paltrow — flashy, flashy name that isn’t even in a Google search,” he says.