Swiss to Vote on Guaranteed $2800 Monthly Income for All Adults

The Swiss really know how to kick us when we're down — while our congress is busy shutting itself down because it's run by soulless opportunists, the Swiss people have gathered enough signatures to force a referendum on whether they should guarantee $2800 in monthly income for all adults.

In response to growing inequality in the European bastion of wealth, a grassroots committee has forced a referendum on whether the state should guarantee $2800 in monthly income, allowing the Swiss to continue their lives of sport and leisure, unencumbered by the horrible, desperate slog of poverty.

The money for their socialist utopia could come from their social insurance system, which already provides them with universal health care (they pay some premiums, depending on if they can afford it). While Switzerland is not the largest country in size, its population is just smaller than New York City's. That's a lot of adults to just hand out $2800 to.

Switzerland has recently passed some of the strictest laws on executive pay in the world, and will vote in November on a 1:12 initiative, which would cap executive pay at only 12 times the amount of a company's lowest paid employee. No date has been set for the guaranteed income referendum yet.