Shaking Off a Shy Reputation at Work

How office introverts can get ahead while staying true to themselves

Quiet and shy by nature, Thomas Lynch is a MBA-mechanical engineer who was pigeonholed by his bosses at SAP as lacking in ambition. Mr. Lynch and his career coach Julie Cohen describe how he learned to take more risks. Photo: Scott Lewis for The Wall Street Journal.

It's easy for someone who's not a big talker in meetings to be pigeonholed at work as lacking ambition or drive. Conference calls can fly right by and he's still reflecting on what to say.

Thomas G. Lynch, a self-described introvert, shook off his old image among managers as quiet and took on new leadership roles at work—without becoming a backslapping extrovert. Here's how he did it.

The Problem

Mr. Lynch was a sales-support executive with a good track record who was passed over for leadership roles because of his quiet personality.

He was promoted several times at SAP America in Newtown Square, Pa., most recently to senior principal in 2011. He enjoys solving customers' problems and working one-on-one or in small groups with his clients, including top officials at government agencies. After 10 years at the maker of business-applications software, the 44-year-old engineer, who also has an M.B.A., wanted to move up into management.

When he started exploring the idea in 2012, however, he heard from bosses that he lacked drive and ambition. "The feedback I got was, 'Tom, you're a smart guy. You're well-respected. But you need more edge,' " he says. He assumed that meant he had to become an extrovert, or more assertive and dominant.

Mr. Lynch has scored major successes with clients, helping drive at least $20 million to $30 million in sales each year, often earning above-average or "top performer" ratings. "You'd never think I'm an introvert if you saw me in front of a customer, because I'm asking questions and trying to solve problems," he says. Introverts tend to thrive when able to think deeply about solutions.

He was often overshadowed at the office by outspoken colleagues, however. "I'm not the type of person who has to say something at every single meeting," he says.

The Solution

Mr. Lynch focused on making his strengths clearer to others.

He asked Julie Cohen, a Philadelphia career and leadership coach and his former colleague at a previous employer, Ernst & Young, to help him become more extroverted. They agreed on six months of coaching sessions every other week.

Ms. Cohen had Mr. Lynch ask 20 colleagues and friends for three adjectives that described him. He was pleased that not everyone saw him as "this quiet person," he says. Colleagues described him as innovative, thorough, empathic, trustworthy and "highly influential." He also attended an SAP employee-training program on developing a "personal brand," or positive image.

Mr. Lynch made a list of his strengths: his focus on the customer, technical skill and being a team player. He enjoys making presentations when he can prepare in advance. Ms. Cohen also had him list his values, to understand what motivates him. To his surprise, it wasn't status or money, Mr. Lynch says. "For me, it's about helping people. Once I reassessed what was important to me, I came to realize that I am more successful than I thought."

He and Ms. Cohen concluded, based on the exercises, that becoming an extrovert "was the wrong goal," Ms. Cohen says. Some of Mr. Lynch's best qualities were tied to his reflective style.

They refocused on helping Mr. Lynch present himself differently, as an innovator and an expert on public-sector clients. "I realized I needed to stop flying under the radar and take more risks," Mr. Lynch says.

Ms. Cohen urged him to speak up more often in meetings. "Sometimes you need to react in the moment, with something that is not 100% fleshed out" to be seen as a full participant, Ms. Cohen told him. She also suggested he talk more with managers about specific contributions he wanted to make.

The Implementation

At Ms. Cohen's urging, Mr. Lynch called a boss, Michael Nixon, who he knew saw him as lacking in ambition. He described what he saw as his strengths, and asked Mr. Nixon how he could gain more responsibility.

"I was a little surprised" by the call, says Mr. Nixon, who is vice president, financial services, for SAP America. He told Mr. Lynch, "This can't be an easy call for you to make." Mr. Lynch had a reputation as a "solid, very professional, very disciplined" employee, but Mr. Nixon says he hadn't seen him show the entrepreneurial skills that help managers advance at SAP.

Mr. Nixon says he urged Mr. Lynch to promote himself and his skills, rather than assuming "people would see his ability and tap him on the shoulder." Self-promotion, he added, "isn't a selfish thing."

Mr. Lynch also called a manager who was organizing an annual sales meeting last January, and asked to participate. When she said, "I've got it handled," he pressed the point. "Even if there's a small part, I'd love to do it." She agreed to let him plan a 30-minute presentation to 100 colleagues in Las Vegas, which broadened his network.

The same manager remembered him a few months later when she became his boss.

He has started building relationships two or more levels up. He recently asked a senior executive for leadership opportunities and won an assignment to a new team studying ways to improve his unit's performance. He also has signed up for professional-development services SAP offers employees, including more coaching and an online tool for help finding an internal mentor.

The Outcome

On a recent team project, the change in Mr. Lynch's confidence and leadership was so marked that "I barely recognized him," Mr. Nixon says. "I would label him a difference-maker." The project brought in three times the expected revenue, or several million dollars, Mr. Nixon says.

Mr. Lynch was delighted recently when his manager asked him to lead a 90-minute breakout session for about 100 colleagues at this year's annual sales meeting next week in Las Vegas.

Being an introvert, Mr. Lynch has decided, can be a plus. While he would welcome a promotion or a new title, he is focusing less on that now, and more on the intrinsic rewards of his work.

The changes have rippled through family life with his wife, Robin, his daughters Tyler, 13, and Ryan, 10, and his 5-year-old son, Tommy. Mr. Lynch used to keep to himself at activities with his kids. At a cookout last fall for Ryan's soccer team, he realized that having a father who knows other parents and coaches might help his daughter have more fun and success on the team.

Knowing he was extending himself for his daughter, he said, "I had a purpose. And the more I have a purpose, the easier it is."

—Have you escaped being pigeonholed on the job and reached a new level? Send your stories to sue.shellenbarger@wsj.com.

While being an extrovert may help one's career, it isn't the most crucial component to success. A great philosopher once said, "The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made." Curiously, politicians who are disciples of another, less eloquent, Marx are the best at putting that advice to effective practice.

I agree Patrick, "Quiet' is a good read that deals with US culture and how we idealize extroverts and have a tendency to undervalue introverts. Perfect example is the Steve Jobs/Wozniak partnership. Woz did most of the heavy lifting but Jobs gets the lion share of the credit for the creation Apple.

If you are an introvert, definitely agree to staying true to yourself. I applaud this individual for taking the steps to make himself successful; at the same time more employers need to realize that the "introverted" employee often has the best ideas and the best work ethic, and that the people who "talk big" in meetings rarely are the ones actually implementing or coming up with ideas. Employers need to realize that introverts are often their most valuable employees, and that the biggest talkers are just that. All talk.

Often bosses promote people who have similar styles as they do. They believe that what made them successful is what is required to be successful.

I disagree with the article's contention that introverts refrain from making presentations or speaking in front of people. It is simply an expenditure of the energy built up during time alone (perhaps in preparation).

Those of us who are introverted are often leaders, but are rarely found chatting up people at the water fountains or break rooms. For an extrovert, break time means interacting with others, while for introverts, it means quiet alone time.

Introversion is not a form of mental illness, and does not require treatment.

There is a difference between being quiet and being introverted. Some extroverted people are quiet.

People who are introverted are not necessarily quiet, but will reflect on issues instead of making instantaneous conclusions. Extroverted people, on the other hand, will pretend to know the answer to a problem, and always try be the first to present a solution in the meeting. Whether it's right or wrong, it doesn't matter, as long as everyone in the room is looking at them.

But that's not to say introverted people are quiet. I'm introverted and I love to talk. It's a little rude, IMO, to never say anything. I just won't be the one pretending to know the answer to something unless I've evaluated the issue first.

> He and Ms. Cohen concluded, based on the exercises, that becoming an extrovert

> "was the wrong goal," Ms. Cohen says. Some of Mr. Lynch's best qualities were

> tied to his reflective style.

I was ready to torch this article until I found this paragraph. Thank you, thank you, thank you. You cannot change a tiger's stripes, nor should you. Asking Mr. Lynch to be what he is not would only make him an unhappy and/or stressed person.

Everyone should take a Myers-Briggs test and/or a StrengthFinders test. They tell you a lot about what makes you unique, and how best to exploit your special skills.

Along that line of thinking... Imagine me, a flaming extroverted geek, working amongst a bunch of quiet math/science nerds who usually don't have English as a first language. What a trip, and I absolutely love it. But there are days when I need evening to come so I can get my creative work done. The brain... just... cannot... stop... networking until the blinders are on. But I forgive myself for that.

"I had a purpose. And the more I have a purpose, the easier it is." Well said, good luck. Everyone is different, but everyone who applies his or herself has a shot at success. Good luck Mr Lynch in your career and life!

America is an extroverted culture and that is what is valued and promoted in the corporate world (for the most part); Having lived in Japan for several years I enjoyed being part of a society where introverts are the majority and are highly valued and promoted.

While I know first hand the struggles articulated in the article and see the value in the techniques employed to raise one's visibility in the workplace, it's also important to have a clear understanding of all of the things that you truly value in yourself, like those introverted qualities, that define who you are as a human being.

I often find that if an extrovert had used their ears instead of ther mouth, there would be no need for them to talk.

Extroverts have often said to me, "If you're not talking how do we know you are thinking?" My answer, "#1 If I'm not talking I'm thinking. #2 When I start talking, I've observed and listened to everything, thought it all out and done all the thinking necessary."

How odd that a manager would promote a loudmouth over someone who is more reserved. In my organization, we promote on performance...not on how outspoken some wannabee is during a meeting. I've found that the talkative ones aren't necessarily the ones who can do the job. They spend too much time bragging and too little time working.

A lot of employers are not smart enough to see who does the work, and who does the talk. Especially when the boss does the talking and threatens the underlings if they talk too much. Introverts should simply leave these dysfunctional organizations when they can.

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