Finally, my autobiography in print again!

My personal journey over the last five years and the significance of the times in which we find ourselves now, inspired me to bring my book up to date. From the beginning when I first published my story, over twelve years ago, I knew this was a book for many of those on a spiritual path looking for meaning and purpose in these evolving times. I frequently speak of “Star Beings,” those “old souls” who often feel alone and out of place, who may find themselves particularly challenged in this chaotic world. We seek higher truths and purpose as we navigate these waters and may often feel like giving up. You are not alone!
I believe my story is ultimately our story as we have traversed through eons of time into the here and now. Of course, my unique adventure through my earlier film career in Adult Films as Kay Parker in the late 1970’s into the mid 1980’s, into my role as a spiritual mentor for the last 30 years, created an interesting and ongoing dichotomy for me. Sexuality and spirituality, it turns out, may be an even bigger issue today than ever before.

Kay

It’s a miracle!

The amazing gift of Ho’oponopono!

So often after I discover a new modality of healing and balancing, I simultaneously hear about it from many others. Since I was first introduced to Ho’oponopono about two years ago, this truly powerful, ancient Hawaiian prayer seems to have found its way into many of the collective healing networks far and wide.

It seems to me that much like “The Celestine Prophecy,” “The Secret” and other works or mentoring modalities, there comes a call from the collective unconsciousness for a way to fast forward in spiritual growth. In other words the critical mass calls for a means to reach deeper inside individually with certain fundamentals of spiritual responsibility – forgiveness, compassion, relinquishment and, of course, the purest form of love. The results of this kind of pure intention can be and, from my own personal experience, pretty much always are miraculous.

We need it now more than ever before – we can impact the world at large with Ho’oponopono!

Ho’oponopono is basically four steps – well, statements actually:

I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

It is so simple! And, with pure intention it can clear the playing field thus allowing amazing things to transpire.

You can apply this to a person, an event or situation, a relationship, just about anything.

My first introduction to Ho’oponopono was when a friend was badly bitten by a dog. The dog was a sweet boy but had been injured in the spot where my friend had petted him and his reaction clearly indicated his pain. His fangs went deep into her flesh on her hand, tearing at her skin. My friend, a brilliant shaman healer, chose not to go to the hospital (as the dog’s owner wished,) instead she cleaned the wound and applied homeopathic ointments and began to Ho’oponopono. She did it all night long – through the throbbing and discomfort. In the morning it was completely healed!

Since that time, I have suggested Ho’oponopono to several friends who were struggling with life situations and the results have been amazing. Money and resources miraculously appeared from out of the blue and, best of all, where there had been no hope, trust showed up and changed the energy completely.

I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.

Ho’oponopono is not about accepting blame or begging for forgiveness, or any any other way we may have responded through our ego selves in the past to difficult or disappointing situations or relationships . It states simply in a most heartfelt way, “I’m willing to let this go so it can transform. That being said, if there is anything or anyone, myself included, needing forgiveness, let it be so.” Then we thank the situation for all the lessons learned, all the opportunities we couldn’t see then by trusting in the Universe’s innate wisdom. Finally we send our love to the entire situation as a final blessing and benediction if you will.

I love talking people through a Ho’oponopono prayer because, guess what, I reap amazing benefits myself. There is no need to dig into the past and who did what to whom, or to continue with our self contemptuous behavior, or guilt and self-judgment. We have the choice to clear it, to truly surrender the past and glide gracefully towards our dreams.

If you are ready to let go and would like to schedule a special session using Ho’opnopono I am offering a very special one-hour Skype session for $125. Just send me an email to this website and we’ll set it up.

I can’t say enough about the wisdom of this gift from Hawaii. I visualize a large group of people doing it for the planet right now. Of course, each one of us can impact the world enormously by our singular intention. Let’s do it!

Newsflash:I’m just days away from the re-printing of my updated Autobiography “Taboo: Sacred:Don’t Touch.”

I’ll keep you posted on that!

Sincerest blessings,

Kay

Past life exploration can be very effective in identifying issues in many relationships whether between individuals or situations. I have always stressed the fact that I don’t do Past Life sessions strictly for novelty rather, when it seems to be an avenue of greater awareness and therefore an opportunity for growth, it can serve it beautiful ways.

When working with a client I usually look at the two or three past lives relevant to their current experiences. This can clear up confusion in relationships, eliminate stress and offer a brand new perspective on their life’s journey and mission. I have seen clients take in a deep breath and finally relax after looking into a previous set of experiences with someone in their life, knowing that the burden(s) they’ve been carrying may be released.

My own past life discovery has been rich beyond words and has answered so many questions I had growing up and into adulthood. Feelings that were deep and often disturbing were identified (what I call “past life bleed-through”) and I was able to find resolution and strength from knowing their origin.

If you feel inclined to experience a Past Life Overview via Skype, I will offer a 10% discount now through August. Check on “Services” for more information.

One of my most significant (platonic) relationships was a room-mate in the 1980s, a female who came into my life during my film career and with whom I lived for ten years. I’ve written a piece about our amazing friendship which I joyfully share with you: Johnine story abrgd. 2016

The Dark Night of the Soul – the disconnect!

Even people who have studied on a spiritual path, or any path designed to lead them to self-realization or enlightenment, find themselves at times struggling with these and other questions. If things are not going as we may want, despite having enrolled in countless workshops or empowerment seminars, and despite all the years we’ve been on our paths, we cry out, “But I’m meditating, I’m chanting, I’m tapping, and I’m doing all those things I’ve come to know that are implicit within the rules of creative manifestation and the laws of attraction as taught in all those workshops and seminars. Why I am still struggling?”

And because the answer is not apparent to us, we loose faith, we spiral downward and enter into the abyss that is commonly known as the Dark Night of the Soul. Strangely though, at that point we may have disconnected from our Soul Selves.

Our Souls are still our Souls and ever will be, whole and complete. But because we are not getting our way, because our Universe is not delivering to us what we want – now, we, the ego self, enters into despair and futility and forgets the primary tenets of our spiritual journey. We forget Gratitude for what we do have, we forget to really look at our creations and appreciate what is there as opposed to what hasn’t shown up yet. We forget that there is a time for everything and that our Universe is in fact lining things up – for the highest good, or if not, that is for the highest good. We judge and undermine ourselves and feel disgusted and worry about what others may think and how we going to participate in our world. And we question everything – but not in a good way!

At that point we have moved out of our hearts and our sweet desires, and our minds are racing us through a myriad of linear thoughts whose intention is to push against the grain – trying to force something to happen. It doesn’t work and may create more confusion and anger.

Time to De-frag the brain!

Let go of your mind and drop down into your heart – literally! Place a hand over your heart and listen. Then, go through a process of releasing and deleting all your brain fog. Here are some suggestions:

2. With intention, call forward your guides and ask them to help you to release any and all programming you may still be subscribing to which no longer serves you. Thank it for its service in the past and bless it on its way.

3. Release toxic relationships with love and gratitude for the lessons provided.

4. Ask that any ancestral baggage you may have been lugging along be deleted if you no longer have use for it. Do this with love and gratitude.

5. Ask that anything bleeding through from a past lifetime – guilt, shame, self-blame, contracts, promises etc. be deleted if it no longer serves you. Do this with love and gratitude.

Finally make a statement to yourself that you will endeavor to stay rooted in your heart, in kindness and compassion. Agree to stay in trust that the Universe really is working for you.

Then watch the miracles appear!

I hope this has been of service to you – further assistance and grace is available through a private session either at my home at beautiful Bushwillows or on Skype. Check my website under “SERVICES.”

May kindness and love surround you.

Blessings,

kay

Every single thought we have ever had is recorded inside…

We draw constantly on the good thoughts – those memories that bring a smile to our face and lift our spirits. They remind us of what is possible as they flood our system with feel-good endorphins. Conversely, the so-called bad thoughts have been filed away selectively, perhaps never to be dealt with again. These thoughts, born out of deeply painful experiences, are more cleverly hidden or buried, holding the specific parts of our bodies where they landed in low resonance, thus leaving us vulnerable to illness and disconnection from our soul selves.

The human instrument is capable of manufacturing neuro-peptides which are infinitely stronger than morphine (if memory serves correctly, it’s something like 90 times stronger,) thus our ability to numb our pain is profound and sad beyond words. It’s no wonder we live in a time when addiction of all kinds is off the charts.

My own journey has been and remains one of recognizing any and all ways in which I may have buried my pain and resolving it through gentle examination, looking at the reasons for the experience, accepting the lessons and moving into compassion and gratitude.

And so it is always gratifying, though amazing to me, when I discover a personal hidden “pain” which has been buried. This means I can restore integrity to my body and my consciousness and become more clear.

Several nights ago while I was tracking a current physical issue, I suddenly returned to an intimate moment with an lover over 30 years ago. In his moment of orgasm this person would always utter something that deeply disturbed me and, quite frankly, ruined my personal experience. I NEVER CONFRONTED OR DISCUSSED IT WITH HIM! As the memory surfaced, my buried emotions and tears welled up and I felt profoundly sad that I had carried the pain for so long. I moved into my process of forgiving myself for having buried the emotions and focused on breathing energy into the body parts afflicted to lift the resonance of the cells there. I still have some more “work” to do but there has already been a 50% improvement. I’m so grateful that I have the tools to do this, tools which I have to share.

Now here’s a synchronicity :

Yesterday I saw the movie “Spotlight.” This is a story based on the true facts surrounding the scandal within the Catholic Church of the suppression of rampant sexual abuse of children by priests (worldwide) and how the truth was brought to light by a group of journalists at the Boston Globe. (I strongly recommend the movie by the way.) I believe that this event marked a collective agreement to address sexual shame more deeply and to understand how the deception of those religious leaders caused a deep and lasting soul-wounding. The healing continues today – two decades later – as those individuals who were victims, their extended families and their offspring struggle to find their spiritual roots and learn to trust again.

Truth sets us free.

If any part of this message hits a nerve, may I suggest that it’s possible you have a hidden or buried issue worthy of being addressed. Truth sets us free and by discovering the source of your discomfort you will inevitably gain quality and more joy in your life.

We frequently carry forward sexual issues from our family tree or from past lives. If this is true for you as is has been for me, you truly don’t need to carry these burdens any longer. You are worthy of being free of these burdens.

It’s my joy to assist you and to help you release what’s been holding you back from a fuller life experience.

To schedule a session – see “Services.”

Blessings and love,

Kay

There is a document which I frequently read before I go to sleep which essentially asks that…anything that still remains to be balanced by us to any person, place, condition or thing we may have wronged at any time, in any way for any reason, be balanced. It also asks that whatever positive energy we may have released throughout our Earthly adventures be multiplied a thousand times and used as a Gift of Love to help balance every debt owed by life everywhere…

I visualize those words flying out into the Earth’s atmosphere like whisps of energy – circling the Earth and depositing the love wherever it’s needed the most. I do this because it feels good. I do this because I KNOW the power of thought, the power of loving, of intention, and of true commitment. There are times when I wish I could do more – to which my inner voice would say – “that’s enough, that’s the best thing you can do.”

We may never know how we have impacted humanity – how could we know except if we deeply acknowledge that our love IS the greatest gift?

And what if our singular thought tips the balance and creates a miracle somewhere, somehow? So let’s imagine that!

In times when there is discord and separation happening in our world, when we sense that we’re on the brink of doom and gloom – we have the tendancy to judge ourselves (more) for not doing enough or being enough. We may feel irritation and anger, and get down on ourselves and feel futile. This causes separation inside. But the truth is that there are those who are meant to be out in the world making a difference and others who work behind the scenes quietly and selflessly, allowing their love flow unconditionally in a beautiful way.

In deep meditation we can generate the peace we desire in the world, we can generate the love we wish to experience, we can become the shining beacons of possibility and resolution.

In Barbara’s Walters’ interview the other night with Bernie Sanders on the “10 Most Interesting People” show, she asked him what he’d like to be remembered for. He thought for a long moment and said, “Compassion.”

What a great answer! I am by no means making a political statement yet his response to me indicated a very wise man!

I’ve spoken about COMPASSION many times, but let me reiterate at this time when we need more of it than ever. Peace cannot be attained in any volatile situation without it. Again I break up the word for redefinition – Com-passion – with passion. And passion, as ever in my mind, can only be attained when the heart is involved, and beyond the heart, the soul!

Compassion says, I understand why or how this situation came about.

Compassion says, I feel the pain and while I may also feel anger and frustration, only a higher understanding and wisdom can offer solution.

Compassion says, matching anger and rage with more anger, rage and waging war (in any situation) is futile and ridiculous.

Compassion says, using love as my motivator, I will look for a way to resolve the situation in a co-operative fashion, calling on the wisdom and understanding of all parties to unite and do what is right “for the highest good of all concerned.”

Merry Christmas Everyone, and may you find compassion this Holiday Season where you may have not found it before!

Look to someone you may have judged in the past and move into compassion using my guidelines. It feels good and takes a burden off both you and the other person.

Some years ago I imagined creating a bumper sticker bearing the title of this blog…..

Instead it became my newsletter banner for a while and it feels right to use it again today.

In times of stress and turmoil, when the world seems mad, the inclination for many is to point fingers and blame, name-call and rise up violently in retaliation, and for many, feelings of futility and uselessness may come up, causing us to shut down inside. In this way, we end up suffering in the worst way.

All of these emotions are natural and not to be ignored. My suggestion is to find a way to safely express these feelings without harm to anyone. There are simple techniques such as pounding on a pillow to release anger and frustration. For many men, going to the gym to kick box and punching a boxing bag is a way. For women (and some men,) drive somewhere remote and private and wail – let those deeply primitive, gutteral sounds come out of the solar plexus and allow the tears to come up – embrace them – the tears that cry for the loss of life and the unnecessary violence. Make sound! Do not suppress! Personally, I choose to roll on the floor to let my own sounds emerge and I’m often surprised at what comes out of me. I often use musical notes: I sing the scale and find a note that feels good to hang on and run it through my body. It helps tremendously.

Above all else – know that the Light prevails – Love prevails. Each of us matters and our love matters in ways we can’t even imagine.

And, as we join together in love and wisdom, the healing begins and we re-emerge victorious.

But what is COMPASSION? From my way of thinking, it can be described in many ways, yet it is essentially wisdom. It says unequivocably, “I understand.” It also says, “I feel your pain and I’m sorry for your pain.” It is unfaltering in its intention and commitment to truth, a deep, often ages-old truth, as to why separation has occurred causing judgment, pain, separation, upheaval and war-ing. Beyond that, compassion is resigned to non judgment, discernment maybe, but not judgment. That means no name-calling! Wow, that’s a tall order for most of us isn’t it?! We are steeped in a world where name-calling and put-down is so common-place it’s become socially accepted and encouraged.

But, let’s be clear, when we name-call or put anyone down (including ourselves,) we are separating from our soul essence. Bullying falls into this category: young or old, bullies have learned bullying because they have not been taught to love and appreciate themselves and their fellow humans.

I am an entymologist and, at the risk of giving you the impression that I am any kind of intellectual, I’m simply fascinated with the origin of words and frequently find an enlightening redefinition from my searching. Many years ago, in researching the word COMPASSION – it seemed that, if one broke up the word it implied WITH – PASSION. That threw a whole new light on its meaning for me! So, what is PASSION? * In researching passion, I had to go to the spiritual implication of its meaning and I discovered that Passion occurs when, and only when, we get out of the way and allow our hearts and senses to take over. (Many may argue that anger is passion – and that’s a different discussion.)

So Beloveds, to reiterate, we name-call because we are unwilling to discover and accept our own inner beauty. We point fingers because we are unwilling to go inside and find out where we are stuck and out of harmony with our soul-selves, and then to do the work to restore our inner unity. So, at this time when we may be looking for political heros, simply there are none – unless- a miracle occurs and one shows up who is unwilling to finger-point, and who has compassion for those who do!

This is a rocky time – the cosmos is bearing down on us to restore our integrity like never before. Each of us has a mission to participate on this Road to Ascension- this Quantum Shift. Have you noticed the glut of dark and violent programming in movies and TV? It’s the resistance to the change manifesting in the media because that’s where it can sink its hooks into our collective consciousness. It’s a clear signal that we need to amp up our loving and get inside of ourselves to know who we are and why we are here.

Any questions? I mean truly, do you have any questions about your mission and purpose or why you can’t seem to get clear? I can help. Invest in yourself! Schedule a Skype session with me – together we can give you the boost you need to move into COMPASSION.

Blessings and grace,

Kay

*In my autobiography, “Taboo: Sacred, Don’t Touch” chapter 7, “Orgasm” (available in text and audio on this website,) I speak to this issue through a personal experience during my film career.

When I decided to accept a role in the movie “Taboo” in 1980, a controversial part at that, I unwittingly become a mother figure to many men across the World. Long before the Internet became a part of our daily lives, my decision pigeonholed me as an object of desire for these gentlemen of all ages, and from all walks of life who still crave their mother’s love– that pure, primal warmth that has no equal (don’t we all, deep down, crave that) – even as some of them judged and berated my decision.

The role focused on a relationship between a Mother and her son and a forbidden attraction. Rather ironically, the writer of the screenplay was a woman, a fact which strangely startled me, given the genre. I had declined the part at first but then, when I realized the film would be made, with or without me, I felt that I could at least play it more sensitively – I could infuse love and compassion into the character’s weaknesses. And, judging by the popularity of the film over all these years, I believe I did that. The camera doesn’t lie and, even within the context of a certain story line, there is an underlying energy emitted by the actors and it is this energy that the soul perceives and receives. *

It is rather ironic that I haven’t been a biological mother in this lifetime. I often joke that the opportunity to play the role I undertook those many years ago, was a set-up by Spirit, to create a platform which has continued to offer me challenges and opportunities to more deeply study and understand the dynamics of love, sexuality and the SOUL. Through my scrutiny of those subjects as I’ve worked with hundreds of individuals as a counselor and spiritual mentor, I’ve been able to more deeply weigh my own relationship to each, for are we not all one?!

Our Mothers are our first imprinters – as the key nurturers they begin to program us with their beliefs about how children should behave from day one, of how to be “good,” a profoundly vague state of being that often confuses and causes a child to shut down. I pray that the current generations experiencing motherhood realize this and are wise to how this dynamic can set up the child for a lifetime of limitation. However, I believe that the very role of Motherhood and all of its demands causes even the most conscious of women to fall short of the intended goal of teaching their children to achieve the highest standards of life, and under pressure recapitulating their own Mother’s patterning, thus their kids still receive imprinting which is far from empowering and holistic. Noble though they maybe, honorable by certain (antiquated) standards maybe, they still cause division between the soul and the human being. And, to be very clear, we are souls having a human experience – not the reverse.

My own beloved Mum – a dear, sweet lady who didn’t have a mean bone in her body, fulfilled her role as Matriarch admirably, yet she was born into poverty and her years of mothering occurred during a time of extreme rationing in post WWII England. The messages I received therefore were of not asking for anything, of certainly not wanting more than I had, sharing what little I did have and, above all else, not to upset my Father (God)…OR ELSE!

So, this person, this first authority figure (the feminine aspect of God – the creative force with us,) was a forbidding, finger wagging, fear infusing, threatening entity who denied me the joy of life – unconsciously. And in doing that, was she not unwittingly teaching me separation from my soul essence?

What of the Mothers across the World who birthed the sons who are waging war and separation, the killers, the oppressors of women – what were they imprinted with as they entered their lives? I have to ask this question, not in any way to lay blame but to offer a reality that is so rarely spoken of. It is the answer to this question that propelled me to write this piece.

As a Mother figure, I have a responsibility to educate and inform and to offer healing and unity consciousness to the many who still seek me out. This is my soul’s mission, this is what I came to do and so I use the platform of my Mother image to do just that – hopefully in larger and larger numbers.

The emergence of the Feminine Principle – that’s what some call it – this global movement towards enlightenment. Ascension! It is actually a dimensional shift from this dense third dimensional, ego dominated reality, into fourth (and fifth) dimensional frequency. In order for this to happen we need a critical mass of individuals who are willing to change – to evolve – to relinquish their programming that causes separation, judgment and fear and to raise their frequency – to literally vibrate at a higher rate of energy. Compassion takes us there. Love takes us there.

Much of this programming of the lower consciousness energies unfortunately was inflicted by the beloved unsuspecting Mothers and later, the Fathers of the world, carried through from their ancestral lineage. This is one of the ways that the dark shadow of the patriarchal overlay has used us and continues to use us. And so, if there are any vestiges of the ancient suppression laden, martyr and victim consciousness in our consciousness, it is our responsibility to do whatever is necessary to process it out.

The resistance we see globally – of the uprisings, of group consciousness of hatred and separation, of blame and shame, of events and situations which leave us stunned and feeling hopeless, of the continuation of the suppression and enslavement of women (and some men) – all are a direct result of this eons old patriarchal matrix!

There’s a story I like to recall, of a teacher of mine who many years ago took a group of individuals to Berlin at a time when the Wall of separation between East and West still stood. They meditated at the Wall and imagined worms of pure Light eating away the concrete, dissolving the past and all reasons for which the Wall was built. It was only a short time subsequent to their loving gesture that the wall came down and history was rewritten.

Likewise I imagine Light beings dismantling the matrix surrounding the planet which continues to infuse human consciousness with the shadow side – the antiquated masculine, domination consciousness. One may visualize it any way they may – suffice it to say that it is an energy force of great magnitude. Daily I ask the angels and guides in the unseen realms to work with us in whatever way they may, given the Planet’s destiny and what is allowed (karmically speaking,) to join together in preparing the Planet for the dimensional shift.

I believe that not only did each of us choose to be here now at this most auspicious time in history, but that of the myriad souls who wanted to be here, who wanted to incarnate to play their parts, we were chosen. We are the ones who can create the critical mass and we are doing that – in obscure ways.

Dr. David Hawkins’ Map of Consciousness (from the book Power vs. Force,) based on a 20 year study of collective consciousness (with over 250,000 Kinesiologic energy calibrations,) shows that, for us to attain that higher vibratory level to make the Shift, to “graduate,” we must, above all else, be willing and deeply intentional about our personal evolution, we must be non-judgmental and ultimately we must stop seeing ourselves as victims.

I have often demonstrated, also with Applied Kinesiology (Muscle Testing) that within any space where there are multiple people, one negative thought (judgment of course is the favorite) can impact every single person present and lower the overall frequency. Conversely, a single positive thought can lift the entire group.

We must be willing to see the greater purpose to everything, every event, every situation –even if our collective heart cries out in futility and despair. We have to look deeper and with intention to find the purpose and to know what our role is in that situation, if only to hold our hearts open and to send love and blessings.

The Great Mother Goddess asks that of us – men and women alike. But since up until now, I reach more men than women, I lovingly implore men to acknowledge the Goddess within – the Feminine Principle – which knows only love and compassion. I urge them to connect with and deeply feel that love they so desperately desire inside – and to recognize that each of us is innately that love.

It takes a real man to do this. We need a few more real men!

From my heart,

Kay

*Chapter 7 in my autobiography “Sacred: Don’t Touch” available in text and audio on this site!