Perhaps you’re actually a character in the most boring tabletop role-playing game in the universe. Certainly the existence of a sadistic gamemaster would at least explain some of the events of your life. Well, that and a few unlucky saving rolls.

Too bad: it’s all real, as this comic from Fowl Language’s Brian Gordon explains. You’re a third-level character in a campaign module designed for seventh-level characters. You have a performance review later today and you’ve depleted most of your hit points.

Take heart. Carolyn Hiler put it very well three months ago: we’re all pretending to be functional adults.