How to flirt successfully

Like many things, flirting is a skill that takes practice to master. Below, certified sexuality educator Amy Levine of sexedsolutions.com shares four tips for letting him know you’re interested.

Tip 1: Don’t Come On Too Strong

Flirting is all about subtlety, and being too aggressive when pursuing someone can turn him off. Levine agrees: “Women are more likely to strike out when they try too hard, act too available, or take the mystery out by making the outcome obvious,” she notes. Likewise, it’s not smart to play too hard to get either. Although most men enjoy some degree of a challenge, if you continue to discourage or reject them, they will give up.

Tip 2: It Takes Confidence

Although you may be secretly quaking in your boots anytime he even looks at you, it’s important to project a confident attitude. If you are a naturally shy person, this may be easier said than done, but Levine recommends wearing a new outfit or something that makes you feel good about yourself. “Sexy shoes can make you feel especially powerful!” she adds.

Tip 3: Drop Physical Clues

If the object of your affection is at a distance, making eye contact and smiling are sure-fire ways to grab his attention. Within closer distances, try gently touching him on the arm or chest while he’s talking, but be careful not to linger too long and create an awkward moment.

“If time is flying by, you’re both having fun, and neither of you is wasted, he’ll likely ask you out and follow through. If not, and you want to see him again, tell him in a flirty way. If he’s doesn’t ask for your number at that point, leave it be-you’re saving yourself a headache later on. And, most importantly don’t take it personally.”

Tip 4: Don’t Forget to Be Yourself

Lastly, “to have a relationship that’s real and lasting, the bottom line is to be yourself,” says Levine. “To get to that point, it’s trial and error. What doesn’t work with one guy will work on another. Your heart is on the line, and until you make your move, you won’t know the benefits or the ramifications.”