A PLACE FOR ONE

THROUGHOUT HISTORY, PEOPLE WHO LIVED ALONE WERE thought
to be either poor souls who hadn't been lucky enough to find a
mate, or prickly sorts who never could keep one.

Not anymore. Today, more and more Americans of all ages are
choosing to live by themselves â€” without romantic partners,
spouses or roommates â€” and are having a tremendous impact on
the way the rest of us live, shop and even mate. For the first time
in history, there are now more people living alone in single-person
households than there are traditional families of a husband, a wife
and one child. According to the latest U.S. census, as of the year
2000 there were approximately 27.2 million single-person households
versus about 16.6 million three-person family households. And the
percentage of single-person households in the U.S. â€” now at
26 percent â€” has been steadily marching upward for at least
three decades. In other words, the era of the home-alone household
is here to stay.

But more importantly, these singles are not just recent
graduates or widows and divorcees in their golden years. A recent
study conducted by New York City-based marketing and design firm
Harvest Communications revealed that while almost a quarter of
single-person households are made up of young people under the age
of 35 who have never been married, many of them are
â€œfinancially independent singles who are postponing marriage
and focusing on health issues earlier.â€? The rest of the
demographic is made up of older singles in their middle and senior
years, many of whom are still very active. The AARP puts the number
of â€œolder adultsâ€? living alone at 15 million, or more
than half the entire population of Americans who don't share their
living space. As one middle-aged single survey respondent told
Harvest, â€œJust because I'm divorced doesn't mean I'm dead
â€¦ not all of us are mowing the lawn on our John Deere every
Saturday.â€? And, in the words of another older woman, â€œI
wish advertisers made senior life sound empowering and not like a
disease.â€?

In fact, across the board, members of single-person households
tend to defy stereotypes that have become way out of date. Simply
put, the image of the beer swilling, pizza gorging postgrad still
trying to hold on to the remnants of his college glory days on a
beat-up sofa with his former frat brothers, or the little old lady
who enjoys mahjong and sits on a phone-book to see over the
steering wheel as she makes her weekly drive to church are simply
out of date. Indeed, a surprisingly large number of these singles,
no matter their age, have two things in common: financial success
and the willingness to spend to satisfy their desires. As an
example, Yankelovich Monitor surveyed this demographic and found
that across all age groups, members of single-person households are
far more willing to spend money on themselves than others their own
age who are in other living arrangements.

Those who live alone are an attractive market in certain product
and service sectors. According to the 2001 Consumer Expenditure
Survey, single-person households spend 153 percent more per person
on rent than those who live in households of two people or more.
They also spend more on alcohol ($314 per year compared with $181).
And, they shell out more per person for reading materials, health
care, and tobacco products and smoking supplies.

â€œWhat sets singles apart from the rest of the population
is their different focus in terms of responsibilities,â€? says
Carey Earle, CEO of Harvest Communications. â€œWe even see this
difference between single luxury-goods purchasers and other
luxury-goods purchasers. Because even at the very high-end luxury
spend, even if a person is not at the highest earning level, they
can afford more than someone at the same level who has kids. Their
prioritization is different: being single allows them to be a
little selfish.â€? Earle is fond of noting that when Sex and
the City's Carrie Bradshaw buys a $500 pair of shoes, she tells
an amazed friend with two kids, â€œI can spend this kind of
money on my shoes because that's the choice I've made: to be
single.â€?

Of course, not every single woman â€” or man, for that
matter â€” is in the market for a pair of Manolo Blahniks that
cost about the same as the weekly wage of an average American. When
it comes to relaxation and recreation purchases, activities and
attitudes quickly begin to divide, both by age (i.e., under or over
35 years old) and, to a greater extent, gender. Yankelovich found
that young singles were more likely (by 12 percent and 6 percent,
respectively) to still allow themselves expensive treats regardless
of the state of the economy and answer in the affirmative to the
question, â€œif I really want something, price is not an
object.â€? Older male singles, meanwhile, tended to seek out
new experiences, while older single women tended to see volunteer
work â€” both before and after retirement â€” as a
â€œyouthful outlet.â€? And when they asked what people who
live alone do when they are upset about world events, both younger
and older single women were far more likely to listen to music,
turn to friends and family, and meditate or pray than their male
counterparts, who were more inclined to pour a drink and get as
much news as possible.

But there is a flip side to this apparent selfishness that cuts
across age and gender lines: the desire for some sort of community
to replace the traditional family structure that fewer and fewer
Americans are living in each year. As a result, â€œpeople are
defining â€˜familyâ€™ much differently now,â€? notes
Cynthia Evans, senior partner in the marketing and media group of
Mediaedge:cia. â€œWhat is interesting today is that with
single-person households, there has become a new definition of
â€˜family.â€™ Today â€˜familyâ€™ might mean a
person with their pets, or they might consider their aerobics class
or their yoga class members of their family.â€? Adds Earle,
â€œtime-starved singles today have developed their own sort of
quick fix communication connectivity. They're out there instant
messaging each other and meeting each other and creating
community.â€?

This desire for connection â€” even if it is not in the
context of a traditional family â€” is rapidly becoming
apparent to savvy companies that are using a variety of campaigns
to get their customers to not just feel like consumers, but members
of a community. Earle points out that hardware giant Lowe's has
lately been holding events for women, teaching them how to use
tools and make home repairs. These are often single females who
live alone and can't rely on the stereotypical â€œman around
the houseâ€? for those services, if he ever could be relied on
before, considering that the chain estimates that 80 percent of
home improvement projects are initiated by women. What Lowe's is
doing, according to Earle, is selling this community experience in
the same way that everyone from Starbucks to companies that sell
boutique adventure travel packages do. â€œThis is going to be
the big trend for the next 25 years, and it's going to be singles
driving it. When hard times hit, families cut out these luxuries,
whereas singles won't,â€? says Earle.

Another facet of what might be termed the commodification of
warm and fuzzy feelings is the growing use of what Earle calls
â€œyoga copywritingâ€? to sell everything from credit cards
to online dating services which, largely thanks to the power of
young singles, have lost virtually all their stigma as the last
refuge of the desperate and dateless. â€œThis is the sort of
thing that appeals to people before they become elite and affluent:
when Citibank uses slogans like, â€˜don't let your checkbook
balance you,â€™ they are tapping in to this belief among young
singles that says, â€˜I can be successful but can also be
holistic and balanced about who I am.â€™â€?

Almost unbelievably, however, the targeting of singles has only
just begun to emerge in the food marketplace. While the George
Foreman grill is a great example of a product targeted at people
who live alone and value convenience, Earle says her focus groups
routinely complain about the dearth of single-serving products.

The growing power of single-person households is affecting not
only mating rituals but also marketing campaigns, which are just
starting to show more positive portrayals of singles using products
such as toilet cleansers that were once considered â€” by
Madison Avenue at least â€” the sole domain of housewives, with
large households to run. Given their penchant for spending whatever
it takes to create the sort of feelings of community and
connectedness they might not otherwise get in their homes or
apartments, members of this demographic are beginning to show that
they have the potential to remake the streetscapes of much of
America as well.

â€œIf people are living in a single-person household, they
don't normally want to be alone,â€? says John McIlwain, senior
resident fellow at the Urban Land Institute in Washington, D.C.
According to McIlwain, when, for reasons of cost, career or
personal preference these singles move to the suburbs, they are
looking for a far different experience than traditional families
with kids. â€œThe defining quality they are looking for is
â€˜walkabilityâ€™ â€” they want a place where they
don't have to get into a car to do everything.â€? After all,
says McIlwain, â€œit's in walking that they build community:
they go to the same dry cleaner, and get to know the people there.
Same thing with their grocery store and their liquor store and all
the places they visit regularly. And along the way, you pass
people, and even if you don't know them personally, you develop a
sense of community.â€?

As of the most recent census, nearly the same number of
nonfamily households were made up of only one member in urban,
suburban and rural settings. And as the number of singles in the
suburbs continues to grow, McIlwain says that urban planners will
have to accommodate these new residents who crave settings like the
new suburban towns sprouting outside of his own hometown of
Washington, D.C. â€” neighborhoods in Maryland, and communities
springing up in northern Virginia in areas like Ballston and around
the Arlington Courthouse.

â€œRight now, builders are selling communityâ€? to this
market, says McIlwain, relating a story that illustrates just how
this need for belonging trumps just about every other concern for
potential renters and buyers. â€œI was working on a very
unusual master plan community in the Southwest that was designed to
be very ecologically sound,â€? he recalls. â€œWe did a
survey of the people who were visiting from out of town, and we
thought that everyone would say they were interested because it was
a very green community, when in fact they all said that they loved
the sense of community.â€? From a builder's point of view,
there are simple things that can be done to achieve this: real
sidewalks, a streetscape where the storefronts vary enough so that
pedestrians see something new every five to 10 seconds, and dense
housing and office space above ground level.

Meanwhile, those singles who are more affluent, and want to live
in a big city, are making their own marks on real estate trends.
â€œThere are many more young people who are buying homes now
for just themselves because they are waiting until later in life to
start families,â€? says Royce Pinkwater. According to
Pinkwater, who is a senior vice president for Sotheby's
International Realty, and who largely works with consumers in the
higher echelons of the market, which tends to, but is not
necessarily, a more middle-aged demographic, single homebuyers are
often women, and very keen to get the sort of house or apartment
that suits their current lifestyle. â€œFamilies want a layout
designed for the family â€” a room for a nanny, a laundry room,
a big kitchen â€” whereas a single person has a lot more
choices. They can go for a fabulous loft, or something less
conservative or traditionalâ€? than they might otherwise
purchase if they were buying for more than just themselves.

If the prevailing ethic of 50 years ago prized settling down,
starting and raising a family, today's America puts individualism
on a pedestal in a way it never has before. In that sense, those
people who choose to live alone are making what can be considered a
very American decision to live life on their own terms, creating
their own communities without regrets or claims made on their lives
that they don't consent to. Of course, who will be around to enjoy
the fruits of all this cultural creation if these singles don't
eventually pair up and reproduce is another question.