Though talk show host Ellen DeGeneres admitted in a recent program that she typically refrains from reading about herself in the news or tabloids, she was bothered enough by one pastor’s op-ed that accused her of being a part of Hollywood’s gay agenda that she addressed it on air.

Quoting from Romans, Chapter 1, Tomczak established the context in which the Bible views homosexuality — that is as “immoral,” “unnatural,” “shameful,” “indecent,” and a “perversion.”

Then, after listing several modern television series with homosexual characters, he mentioned DeGeneres directly:

‘Ellen DeGeneres’ celebrates her lesbianism and ‘marriage’ in between appearances of guests like Taylor Swift to attract young girls.

Tomczak goes onto suggest alternative programming for families looking for more “wholesome” programming, including Leave It To Beaver, Little House on the Prairie, Gunsmoke, and I Love Lucy — all of which can be purchased on DVD or streamed.

DeGeneres, having been alerted to the article, addressed Tomczak on her talk show. She defended her marriage to Portia de Rossi, denied any gay agenda whatsoever, and sprinkled her monologue with a little humor, culminating in a final faux hypnotizing of her audience, in which she claimed her only “agenda” is teaching the youth of the world to “be more compassionate.”

“First of all, let’s break this down,” DeGeneres began. “I’m not ‘married,’ I’m married, that’s all, just married,” she said, to the delight of her audience.

Continuing, she said, “Larry, I don’t even know what it means to celebrate my lesbianism, I mean, I guess I do, it’s like that… [pops a ‘party popper’] I’m gay!”

Poking fun at the pastor, DeGeneres listed some of the shows mentioned in the article, like Glee and Modern Family, and quipped, “If you ask me, Larry’s watching a lot of gay TV.”

The hostess continued to joke that I Love Lucy may not be good for kids because of all the chocolate Lucy shoves in her mouth in that classic episode. DeGeneres then questioned the platonic relationship between main characters, Lucy and Ethel, implying perhaps there was “something going on.”

“I don’t have an agenda,” DeGeneres proclaimed. “I’m not here to brainwash anyone, but… [grabs a hypnotizing prop and begins to spin it] Listen to the sound of my voice. Attention youth of the world: I want you to live your lives being exactly who you are. Be true to yourself. The most important thing is to be true to yourself. The second most important thing is that you wear Ellen Underwear, and only Ellen Underwear…”