Luncheon honors wives’ sacrifices

Adrienn Loughmiller, president of the Cheyenne Mountain Chapter of Gold Star Wives, tells Col. Michael T. Tarsa, acting senior commander, 4th Infantry Division and Fort Carson, about her husband, Staff Sgt. Clint Loughmiller, pictured on the wall in the Fallen Heroes Family Center, who died May 7, 2011. (Photo by Andrea Stone)

By Andrea Stone

Mountaineer staff

The Soldiers waited. The tables were prepared, the roses were ready, and the food was heating for the special guests — more than a dozen Gold Star Wives.

The women were honored at a luncheon March 13, 2014, at the Fallen Heroes Family Center, and the Soldiers were there to see to their needs, refill their glasses and present each a rose.

“I like doing this, coming here,” said Spc. Justin Larkin, 2nd Battalion, 12th Field Artillery Regiment, 1st Stryker Brigade Combat Team, 4th Infantry Division. “I lost one of my buddies in Kuwait last year. It feels good to be here and experience it with everybody else.”

“I would like other Soldiers to do the same thing (for my Family) if I wasn’t here,” said Spc. Vernon Desdune, 2nd Bn., 12th FA Reg., 1st SBCT, 4th Inf. Div.

The event, part of Gold Star Wives Day, April 5, was almost a month early because of a scheduling conflict.

The lunch was an opportunity for widows from the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq to interact with widows from earlier generations.

Paula Sarlls’ husband was a Vietnam veteran who died in 2009 from exposure to Agent Orange.

“I (thought), I’m not a Gold Star wife because he didn’t die in the war,” she said. When she met another wife from Gold Star Wives of America, however, she discovered that she qualified for benefits she didn’t know about.

“She said, ‘You’re entitled to this benefit and that benefit, and I was able to keep my house because of the benefits. Otherwise, I would’ve had to move,” she said. “Just because your husband died, if it’s service-related … you’re a Gold Star wife.”

In his address to the women, Tarsa commented on the strength he saw displayed.

“I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in the way you care for one another, and the solidarity that comes with such difficult circumstances. The other thing that’s striking is just the poise and the grace with which you ladies have persevered,” he said.

In addition, Tarsa read a statement from the commanding general, who’s currently deployed to Afghanistan.

“Formal recognition of Gold Star Wives (Day) began by the Senate proclamation of 2010, but Fort Carson’s commitment to the Families of our fallen existed long before then,” the statement read. “Events like today’s luncheon ensure we fulfill our duty to support those left behind, giving them the opportunity to join with others who lost their Soldier, to know they are not alone, to know that they always have a home at Fort Carson, to know that they are honored members of the 4th Infantry Division.”

While Gold Star Wives Day has only been formally recognized since 2010, the group has been in existence since 1945. Eleanor Roosevelt signed the original incorporation papers.

“She worked with survivors and spouses and children and realized that there needed to be some type of connected network support group for spouses,” said Nannette Byrne-Haupt, Family support coordinator at Survivor Outreach Services.

The Cheyenne Mountain Chapter of Gold Star Wives was inaugurated in March 2013.