Being independent and living up to being one is an act of great responsibility which everyone yearns for. Some are, apparently, independent as early as in their post teen years and some, in country like ours, are still not, even in their sixties. Does that mean being independent is a frame of mind that depends on our thought processes, the way we perceive things and the extent we are affected by our surroundings?

In our society, it’s still OK when a person, single but of age, to stay with their parents, with their families. But, being in a family and having to do less stuffs, does not make one dependent on others or vice versa. True independence is not just being able to do stuffs by ourselves and having to make a living out of our profession, going to the market, buying vegetables and then eating and tomorrow is an another day! I have seen people, who are in a family, with many authoritative people around, yet having a strong opinion, a sense of decisive choices. They think, they talk and most of the times, live by what they believe in. They have individualistic traits that make them independent. On the contrary, some who have been living alone since tender age still do not quite have their opinion, their free thinking power, their might. What I want to say is, independence is not as much as in our apparent decision to live all by ourselves as in being able to think, reason and live independently. I agree, living by our own means and deciding on several small earthly issues and subsequently, seeing it happen does make us individuals enough to take a decision. But being independent is not just that at the end of the day.

My ability to think for myself and having the power to see the broader view of what we are thinking and what we are not make me strong. The power to decide between the right and the wrong, the power to reason as I believe in and to stand by it whenever situation arises and be responsible for what I do and what I do not, not only makes me independent but also beautiful.

It’s about making one’s own choices and getting less limited to physical restraints. Having said this, no one can be fully independent or dependent for that matter. The base of every society ensures our interdependence – the cohesive force that binds us together. That way ‘true independence’ might sound like an oxymoron. But then, when we wait for our parents’ nod or our spouse’s choice or our kids’ opinion, we are still independent. For all of these manifests our love and integrity to our families. It’s important that we instill this power to think independently, to speak our minds, to have our own reasons, choices and preferences, the sense of righteousness, the power to judge unaffected in the formative years of the children. The children should also learn that freedom comes with responsibilities. The responsibilities that they would grow up to do justice to.

I have been trying to have a terrace view, alienating myself and believing in my understandings and the perceptions. Trust me, nothing is more beautiful than having to determine and resolve the things we believe in, for ourselves. It makes us beautiful and the world too.

(Here I will categorically exclude the children who suffer dishonorably and go through the most mortifying days of their lives. They are in my prayers and will forever be.)

I was watching a few street children playing with mud and smudging each other. I thought, they were the happiest creatures on earth today. Free, uninhibited and spontaneous. But then, that was just an onlooker’s perspective and I had little idea what was going on in their minds! Even kids have their happy and sad times. They too have their share of down moments. They too go through peer pressure, pressures of task load and an incessant torture to do well in exams. And today, they are even a few steps ahead of our times. They have to have the right dress, right gadgets, right food, and sometimes the right hair day! They are losing their childhood so fast! But do they really know what bleak moments of life lead to the do-not-exist-kind of state! They don’t. Then how could they be the happiest?

Do you really think that a kid knows what is it to become happy? Happiness to them is just a paper boat or being able to play in the sun or even sucking the cheapest lollipop. As a kid, how badly I wanted to grow up fast to earn my own money and become a doctor and help others! My friend wanted to become a pilot and fly in the sky!

It would be a matter of mere speculation that children are the happiest. Its only when that they grow up and know what it all takes to live it, that they realize the true meaning of happiness. Its then that they feel that they were better off as kids! Generally speaking and keeping aside all those children who live a degrading life, childhood may be the most secure and safe, but children might not just feel that happiness! We adults are in a position to compare for we have lived it all. A child cannot delineate for he has only seen the brighter side of it. Childhood is bliss and kids are relatively stress free, care free and are uninhibited. True! But how does that make them the happiest? We have to know the both sides of life, both happy and sad times to actually become the happiest. We may be blessed with most blissful childhoods, we may have all happy things on earth but as a child we cannot gauge at the depth of happiness for we have not seen the big bad world.