Da Couch Tomato

An attempt at a new layout, with horrible glitches, and very minimal knowledge of HTML.

Cinema, television, literature, and music–basically anything that can be reviewed. If you're interested in writing reviews, e-mail us at dacouchtomato@gmail.com. We won't pay you for reviews, but you get to practise your writing skills. It's a win-win situation for everyone.

Episode Recap: Game of Thrones Season 6, Episode 5: "The Door"

HBO

"Ugh."

There is only one free Stark left in Westeros. Ned and Catelyn and first-born Robb are dead, Rickon is in the Bolton’s custody, Arya has no name, and Bran is beyond the Wall (if we consider north of the Wall as outside of Westerosi jurisdiction). And that one Stark is Sansa. Jon Snow is of course a biological Stark, but legally a bastard, and cannot exercise any claim over Winterfell. And that one Stark has just stood up to the devious Littlefinger, although she still seems to have trust issues with her half-brother.

Arya’s training doesn’t seem to be going well. She still has a lot of questions; not the mark of good soldier. And clearly she hasn’t completely relinquished her name, because memories of her Stark life still stir up emotions in her. I think we can cut her some slack. Witnessing your father's beheading can be quite traumatic, and anyone who can come out of that unscarred is either an emotionless rock or a White Walker.

Elections in the Iron Isles aren’t all that impressive. Ascension to the Salt Throne isn’t determined by blood. It’s determined by cheering and applause. And the winning candidate is inaugurated by surviving an attempted murder by drowning. No wonder the Greyjoy siblings fled after their uncle Euron was crowned. They’re probably off to another land with a better system of succession of leadership.

HBO

And better crowns.

The drama between Jorah Mormont and Daenerys Targaryen is quite touching. Twice banished, twice returned. I feel for Ser Jorah, of course. His loyalty is unwavering, his love unrequited, and his disease unpleasant.

Who is this new face in Meereen? Another red woman? But her hair’s not red. Another witch of the Lord of Light? Too bad she didn’t show us any magic yet. I’m curious as to whether all Lord of Light magic is as powerful as Melisandre’s. And I am doubly curious as to what the mysterious voice said to Varys when his cock was cut off.

HBO

"I look like Rachel Weisz, but not as pretty. And no relation to DB Weiss."

Things are actually more interesting now north of the Wall. The biggest surprise isn’t really finding out how the first White Walker looked like before he became the Night King, neither was it how he was turned in the first place, nor the fact that the Night King can interact with Bran’s warg state. Second only to the origin of Hodor’s hodor, the biggest surprise here is that Game of Thrones, this television show that millions love, has just added another genre to its multi-genre classification: time travel. And yes, I would like to see more of this please. Make it happen, Messrs. Benioff and Weiss.