I want to get married sooner than later. What do I do?

I currently have 0 prospects. My boyfriend and I broke up approximately 4 months ago and he wants no contact. His friends think I'm off limits.

I grew up in a liberal part of the country in a liberal city where getting married young was always looked down upon. I found someone who was very close to the person I want to spend the rest of my life with and now I can't stand just dating.

I never ever thought I would be that girl. I'm 23, but I'd like to be married around 26 I think. I just don't want to date to date anymore. I used to date for fun... and then I met someone who told me he only dated for marriage. I thought tat was insane... but now that I've experienced it, there is nothing better.

Where do I go? What do I do? I'm about to graduate from college and leave the city where I have been for 4 years. I'll be restarting in some city... I don't know how ot make friends outside of college.

I even used to think being a stay at home mom was shameful. Now, I'd love love love a life where I can work one day a week and then be there for my kids and my husband all the time. I even used to HATE cooking because I thought it was only something girls had to do... then when I dated this guy and I cooked for him I found that I really liked it! It was the most confusing experience ever. I found myself wanting to make him cookies so he could take them to his students. I loved setting the table and being all domestic... something I've ALWAYS hated.

This guy changed my world. He made everything I found shameful, cooking, cleaning, being a sty at home mom sound... good? That's so scary. Where else will I find men that actually respect a woman who is willing to admit those things?

What Girls Said 1

Anonymous

First of all, you are only 23 I would not freak out you have plenty of time. From your description above it seems like you really liked the IDEA of this guy, you don't sound like you really love HIM and wanted to marry HIM.

It's fine that you realize what you want in life. I understand that you are at a point in your life where you want to move forward and find a serious relationship. I believe that as you get older you will meet more guys who want that same thing too. Guys don't mature as fast as girls do, usually anyway, so you may want to date a slightly older guy.

But I wouldn't start off on the first date telling the guy you want to get married right away. Go on a date or two and if you see any type of future THEN tell him what you want in the future. Don't freak out. I would love to be 23 again and do it all over again. I'm 28 and no where close to where I want to be in life either.

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Asker

yeah, that's true. I guess it was just hard finding someone so close to "the one" and then finding out he's really not... I didn't want to marry this guy no, but he made me realize a lot of things about myself that I didn't know. That's what I meant by putting him in there. I like what you said about not telling a guy you are only looking for marriage... the last guy I dated said that and I will admit I totally freaked out! Later on, I realized that's what I wanted too