to all ye mammies who've done this before how was it going from 1 child to 2? was going from o to 1 harder or easier? Please be honest I really want to prepare myself. DD will be 4 when baby arrives so I'm hoping this will be of benefit to us.

I'm worrying over whether no. 2 will be a sleeper but sure I can't do anything about that. That was the one thing I learned the hard way with DD, she was what she was and it was totally her personality not to sleep great. I'm quite an anxious person (not to the rest of the world but at home with DH I'm very anxious) so I want to learn to chill out more and not get caught up with looking after everything 100%. The kids have to be my main priority so having clean tidy house and fancy dinners on table every night can't be an issue (these are expectations I put on myself BTW no one else LOL ). I think my GP will be getting a few visits from me post birth. I just have to remember how flippin' blessed we are to be having 2 kids after 20 years together.

Hey chacha , to be honest I found it grand. My wee Ds was such a chilled baby that he didn't impact too much on family life so DD (then 22 months) wasn't too put out. It did effect her sleep which was crap as she had only just started to sleep properly and she totally regressed to calling out constantly( nightmare)Now is when I find it harder as he is wrecking all her games and driving her bananas, I'm a contant referee!! Now from 2 to 3.... that scares me... must plant my valium tree in the garden !

Hi, Just my twopence worth - I think it will really help that your daughter is 4 - she'll have her own little life going on. I also think how hard you find it depends very much on your expectations and the personality of your new baby. Personally I found going from 1 to 2 very very hard - but my first fella was a textbook baby and great sleeper, my 2nd fella was anythng but- it was very frustrating and a real shock the system, I eventually realised he wasn't going to sleep as much as his brother did and chilled out a bit. Plus my older boy was 2.5 - both mine were definitely hardest work between 2.5 and 3.5 - months of potty training, constant bickering, no more daytime naps yet exhausted by 5pm and almost posessed! Thats why I've waited a bit longer for no. 3 - couldn't even contemplate the thought a year ago - DS2 will be 4 and so much more independant now. If you can arrange it so your 4 yr old has a few things going on - playschool or playdates, or some camps over the summer - I think it'll make it much easier.

i have to say i didnt find it hard with the children going from 1-2,, tho i think my personal confidence did take a hit.. dealing with the kids was a piece of piss.. dealing with my self well i didnt have time... i really think its down to the childrens personalitys..hopefully 2-3 will be the same but without my body hang ups..(eg after baby no 2 i managed to lose 3.5stone and started feeling normal again.. and now no 3 is on the way im adament im not gouing to put so much weigh on during preganancy)

Hey Chacha, frm ur posts ova last few mths... U v upbeat person so am guessin ur wee girl is a great wee girl. U both wil be great wit new baby. I do remember bein very worried myself about no2 arrival. Eldest was 2yr 8mths. He did revert a wee bit like askin for bottle etc & we just humoured him... Only lasted few wks. I made a play outta askin him wot I sud do when baby cried (tried not to laff in his face wit sum of his wee suggestions!) & normally nudged himin rite direction. Mayb cos like u we feared the unknown... But we were pleasantly suprised. X

I haven't read the other posts on your thread so sorry if i am repeating some (just don't get the time). Honestly everyone's experience is different, I found it harder with 2, you have very little time for yourself & your constantly on the go. Some people say its easier with the 2nd and in many respects it is as your much more experienced. I was great with the 1st I could just up & go where ever i wanted but i find now it takes a lot more planning. I have 2 boys, ds 1 was 2years & 3 months when ds2 arrived a nice age gap as my eldest was becoming more independent.

I cope very well with 2 getting out & about is no problem now, Im due no 3 & there ages will be 3 years 15 months & new baby-ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh i wonder how i'll cope, will i ever get out again

You will find your feet & your DD will be a lot of help to you best of luck :)

My dd was 18 motnhs when my ds arrived in 2010. I can honestly say that for me it was the hardest year of my life. Not that I want to scare you but to share my experience, which of course can be different depending on each child.

My dd as exgremely jealous for the first 7 months. We tried to get her involved but it took her time to accept her new brother. For 7 motnhs she blanked him. i bfed him and no sooner I get him latched, she would demand, cry, wanted everything under the sun. he suffered from reflux so he cried a lot , I mean a lot like 12 hours a day. After that she started to hurt him so we hed another 9 hellish months. I was exhausted, betweennewborn waking every 2 hours and her started to wake up at night too, but at different times, I was like a walking zombie. I did managed to get some routine going, but it was almost impssible to synchronize their naps so most of the day I spent either, feeding or getting one or the other to get to sleep.

She is 3 now and he just turned 2 and finally and the last 6 months I started to feel relief, thing are now lovely, she loves him, hugs him and looks after him. He adores her. Ofcourse they have scraps, but it is lovely for them being so close.

One word of advice- if you get chance, get help and a lot of it. My mum literally lived with me for the first 7 months. I know I had difficult baby with the reflux ( 6 months of crying) but you will need help anyhow. Forget about being house proud, you will not be able to do it so let go of your expectations so that yo do not get stressed over it. You need to get super organized, take advantage of every minute. ( I rememember cleaning bath when having shower etc)

You will find what works for you, and yes the transition from 1 child to 2 is huge, but sooooo soooo worth it. They will be close and you will love watching them. Just get over the first year and things get easier.

DD has really gotten on board with the baby and is talking non stop in a positive way and I know she'll be of great help - she already is I have her picking up stuff off the floor now that I can't bend

I guess it's the sleeping part that is worrying me. DD did not sleep at all and only this year gone has got into a routine. She didn't even nap properly until 11 mths (3 15mins naps a day) so I was worn out. I know I'll be fine to be honest and it's go go go here anyway with her. I think because I have less of the pregnancy to go than I've been pregnant I'm starting to panic a wee bit. Up until the 20 wk scan I honestly didn't relax (miscarriages take so much away from you it's just horrible) so now I'm thinking of routines etc.

I would love another one already Magzero LOL but I'm 40 and my 2 miracles are such a blessing so I'm going to try and relax and enjoy the rest of the pregnancy

great point there from Magzero involve her & let her make decisions, mine i used to let them choose what babygrow or outfit they would wear, ask them to go & get me nappy, let them put on a bit of sudocrem or sprinkle the powder, let her hold the new baby or hold the bottle if youre not b'feeding, (they get pretty bored after a few mins) that kind of thing. The help was lovely & you'll be fine cause you've only 1 DD It was the arguing that got to me "its myturn" "no its not its my turn!!" then they'd both leg it to the bathroom & they'd be holy war about who physically picked up the fecking nappy & brought it OMG drove me silly & it was DD2 that always caused the fight!!!

Ive never found newborns "hardwork" even with colic & sleepless nights.1 to 2 i found much easier than 0-1 honestly cause with my 1st i hadnt a clue. Even 2 to 3 i found easy but i found 3-4 wasnt as easy but simply because DD2 (4yrs at the time aswell) is very hard work! with 2 DD's both old enough to want to be involved with EVERYTHING the fighting & arguing over who got to do what really got me down especially like i say DD2 as she is soooo headstrong & stubborn!