How To Use the New App Obsession My Idol (and Actually Get It to Look Like You)

You totally can pole dance...watch!

You might be wondering what is going on on Instagram right now if you've seen the majority of your friends and/or celebrities posting clips of themselves as their cartoon likeness, pole dancing to a slow jam that you've never heard. For example:

Yesterday, an app craze swept the internet. It's called MyIdol and it's a Chinese app that is available on your iPhone that promises to blow Bitmoji out of the water. The latest in narcissistic experimentation means that you get to invent an animated version of yourself and then make it do silly things, like sing karaoke, dance around to "Sexy Back," or work the stripper pole.

The hard part though is getting your avatar to actually look like yourself because the entire app is in Chinese. That's right, it is an elaborate guessing game and before you get to see how you look with a huge head and tiny body (the dream! amirite?), you get a few ego blows. For example, after I managed to take my selfie and uploaded it successfully, the app assumed that I was a man. Cool.

Then, I got a little better at figuring out how to make it look more like myself but the outfits that were at my disposal were a little bit...skanky to say the least. So if I didn't want to look like a dude, I got to be some sketchy dude's teenage dream.

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Don't even get me started on skin tone and hair. I got myself to a brown tint after a lot of concentration and color manipulation but a curly haired option, forget it! So I decided to go with a side part which looks like I am wearing a 64 inch weave (and maybe a bit too much like the girl from The Ring) so I would implore the OS design team to really expand on the ethnic range represented.

Overall though, since I am a genius and taught myself Chinese in about 30 minutes, I ended up with a version of Danielle that looks mostly like the real Danielle! Yesterday, I wore what Justine Harman, our entertainment editor deemed my "Hey,Arnold!" look, which was a pair of destroyed jeans, a cropped white tee, #mycalvins, and a red and green plaid shirt that was tied around my waist. Et Voila! MyIdol Danielle is missing the styling nuances but she's got almost everything else right.