NASA will study the feasibility of human reproduction in space, it announced on Monday.
We know what you’re thinking. And no, it doesn’t involve astronauts having cosmic-nookie in zero-g conditions. NASA doesn’t appear to have an official policy about getting it on in the heavens; it’s not strictly forbidden, but there have …

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LOHAN

Re: LOHAN

LOHAN was overseen by long-term El Reg staffer Lester Haines.

As far as I understand/can recall: the device used a rocket motor that couldn't be legally launched in Europe, so it had to go to the United States for firing. It required a permit from the US aviation watchdog, the FAA, however officials couldn't decide how to classify it - whether it was a drone or a rocket.

They were busy rewriting the rules for drones at the time, and seemed hesitant to make a decision before the new regulations were approved, which had all sorts of politics attached to it. So LOHAN was somewhat lost in federal government's bureaucracy.

In 2016, Lester died, dealing us all a blow in more ways than one. The project has been in stasis since, although not forgotten. We've got our hands on the kit again. There may be movement soon.

Sue: Unless Cally is a virgin, of course. And we all know that’s bollocks. And if they are really that desperate to watch people having sex, why didn’t they get their army of bald accountants to put on an orgy for them? It doesn’t make sense.

Tarrant: How’s that, darling? More comfortable?

Dayna: Oh yes. Much better. Thank you, darling.

Sue: But if you ever put it there again, I’ll kill you.

Dayna removes a small object from her mouth.

Sue: She’s picking Tarrant’s pubic hair out of her teeth.

It turns out that Dayna really has been hiding explosive devices in her cavities after all…

There's a movie in this story...

So, the sperm live in the space station for a bit, a gamma ray burst from the sun hits the station. The sperm get sent back to earth and start growing. When they hit semi-truck size, they break free of their lab and start destroying everything on earth while looking for that one woman with whom to breed.... Yeah.. Mars Needs Women updated... B-movie!!! It''ll be uuuuggggeeee. Just need to find the right leading lady.

Hang on there's been a knock at the door and two gentlemen are delivering me a white coat with extra long sleeves.

> but there have been no confirmed cases low-Earth ejaculation so far.

Now, I am not a doctor or a professional in any other biological science, however, my understanding from vaguely remembered biology classes is that, for a healthy male with normal sexual functionality, it would be literally impossible to go without ejaculating for any significant length of time (I vaguely recall it being ~2 weeks, but let's just say a couple months).

Unless the male has a medical problem, or undergone some sort of medical procedure, sperm (and semen in general, not just the actual sperm) is being constantly created in the body. At some point the reservoirs fill up and have to be drained to some extent. This typically happens, if someone hasn't had sex or masturbated within the relevant window, during a sleep cycle (often accompanied by sexual dreams).

Therefore, unless NASA is only sending males with reproductive medical issues, or requiring medical procedures to inhibit such, into space, then it would be impossible that there has not been ejaculation in LEO given there have been many male astronauts who have spent at least a couple months, and more, in LEO on the ISS and Skylab before it.

Re: confirmation classes

Re: confirmation classes

... those dirty sheets were sent back to disperse in the Earth's atmosphere. Basically you, me and 7bn other people have been inhaling incinerated astronaut jism for the last 30 years. No wonder the world has got so screwed up.