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What’s It About: A really screwed up family rents out the spare rooms in their house to students who just want to screw, and then killing ensues.

Here are some of my observations as I watched the film

Yvonne DeCarlo is in this. I’ll hold off on The Munsters jokes as long as I can.

Somewhere in the production of this movie, “The” was added to the film’s title, but not in its marketing. A Schoolhouse Rock about the importance of definite articles was lost here.

Looks like we’re seeing the ending during the beginning in slow motion first. Super-duper.

Avery Schreiber is in this too? In a serious role? I always associated him with Doritos commercials and his role in “Scavenger Hunt.”

Hey! Scotty is the chick that seduced Billy Crystal and kidnapped his baby in “Soap.”

The montage of Scotty looking for off-campus housing was clearly the inspiration for the same kind of scene when the Tri-Lambs did it in “Revenge of the Nerds.”

Not only does Mason look like he’s gonna be trouble, he also looks like the bastard son of Gilfoyle from “Silicon Valley.”

When a potential landlord tells you that this used to be his sister’s room, fucking run!

When someone is staring at you through a heating vent, make sure you try and get a few beans kicked back off your rent.

Mason has a Lily Tomlin mullet and I don’t like him.

It’s really weird seeing Yvonne DeCarlo in color.

Holy shit, is this tracking shot going to show us every nook of the interior of the Engles’ house?

The actor who played Peter really needed to pop that zit on his nose prior to filming.

Doris could have been a little more receptive to Peter’s advances. It’s not like there was another guy in the house interested in her.

When Doris calls Peter an “asshole,” she is clearly ADR’d. It looks like she originally said, “jizz-bag.”

Peter passes out drunk on the beach, just like that poor blue-balled bastard from the beginning of “Jaws.”

Someone must have heard my “Jaws” reference, because Peter’s bloodied hand is sticking out of the sand just like Chrissie Watkins’ was.

Cameron Mitchell, who was the commander in “Space Mutiny” plays Avery Schreiber’s partner. That’s for all you MST3K fans out there.

Any tow-truck driver who yells “va-va-voom!” when he shows up for a job does not deserve your business.

When stressed, Mason fondles his “father’s” army uniform. Not good. (the quotes will be explained later.)

Mason’s taste in porn leaves something to be desired.

The set used for the police station was definitely a school at some point.

Jack looks like Jeff Bridges had a kid with one of the douche bags from Cobra Kai. I could make a sweep-the-leg joke here but I wouldn’t want you to think less of me.

The soundtrack has no shame at all when trying to sound like Bernard Hermann whenever there is a stabbing.

Doris not only listens in on Scotty and Jack having sex, but she seems as if she wants to critique their moans.

This movie has the sheer balls to have a killer that is not deformed or disfigured in any way.

I thought that ripped jeans weren’t cool until hair-metal was invented four years later.

Mason’s sister is actually his mother, his father is his grandfather, and his mother is his grandmother. Faye Dunaway summed it up better in “Chinatown.”

There sure are a lot of gunshots happening here without any response by the police.

The killer-sister hidden away in the closet never speaks. Is that the Silent Scream?

It turns out that Victoria was originally portrayed by Susan Backlinie, but was then replaced with Barbara Steele. Susan was Chrissie Watkins, the skinny-dipper who got chewed up in the beginning of Jaws – so the Jaws jokes from before were pretty fucking appropriate weren’t they?

She should be singing, “Benny and The Jets” with those sunglasses.

Is It Actually Scary:There are some moments that give a pretty good scare. The whole beach scene with Peter and Doris builds up to a great payoff.

Dumbest Moment: The useless cutaway to Mason watching a rape on his TV. He didn’t seem to have a VCR, Betamax, or a 8mm camera – so how the fuck did he tape it? Also, the girl getting raped in the video is Susan Backlinie. Just felt like I had to reinforce my Jaws references again is all, even though I grow tired of referencing her at this point.

How Much Gore: Just some blood spatter. However, the gunshot would on Lily (Munsters joke!) is zoomed in on showing a little meat.

Best Line: The terribly dubbed “you’re an asshole” I think should have the accolade here.

Apple’s ear buds were uncomfortable even way back in 1980.

Best Scene:The few minutes we’re lucky enough to see Scotty in a bikini. If you haven’t figured it out yet, the girl’s name is Scotty wise-ass.

Worst Scene: The slow-mo ending during the opening credits could have been avoided completely and placed where it should have been. It really took away from the film’s resolution.

Any Nudity: A little bit when Scotty and Jack finally consummate their “we rent in the same house” relationship.

Overall: A forgotten movie that was plagued with re-shoots and re-writes; Silent Scream is definitely a diamond in the rough at the height of the eighties-slasher boom even though it was filmed in the late seventies. Looking into the film’s history is almost as confusing as why DC can’t make a super-hero movie worth a fuck – but the end result is a good slasher well worth some respect..