Tag: friends

So in my attempt to get out more I have a few events planned. I have a networking event for other black bloggers scheduled for 2/17 and I also bought tickets to see the screening of School Daze on 2/19 at the Fox Theatre. Yeah Spike Lee is a role model to me (and my play dad in my head since we also look remarkably alike) and I’ve seen everything he’s done. I hope he will be at the screening but I’m going nonetheless.

Then there’s Black Panther. I’m going to see it three times! yes, you read that correctly. Three times! I’m going opening night Thursday, then back on Saturday and again on Sunday in 3D!. why am I seeing it 3 times? Well first, to Support the movie. the second reason is because the first time I’m going to see it with ‘my people’ and I already know it’s gonna be loud and crazy and I won’t hear a damn thing. So Thursday is just for show and numbers. The second time I see it Saturday with be in a ‘less urban’ area out in the suburbs where I live. This time I can actually focus on the movie and what is going on. The third is because, well 3D!

So this week is going to be busy! Oh, yeah. I also start my new job tomorrow… Hopefully, I’ll be able to write a quick review about the movie. If not trust me, it was awesome!!

Share Is Caring, Tell a friend to tell a friend:

Rejuvenation Sunday is almost over. Time for me, and us, to focus on the upcoming week. Got some big things popping and I’m gonna need all my praying for grandmothers out there to send a word up for me. I need my situation rectified. I want to tell y’all because y’all are my peoples and all but I can’t let the cat out of the bag just in case it falls through. Y’all not gonna be looking at me crazy like, remember that time to you told us such and such? Nah, not on my watch.

So, my first event of the year was supposed to be last Saturday but I wasn’t able to make it. I know I know. But there will be another event on February 24th or something like that. This time I will be in the building. I really wanted to go to this last event. It would have been a great way to network and learn but alas. Life. Sigh.

I plan to interact more and that starts with writing more. So like I said before, to keep updated you gotta subscribe. Basically, dassit. I’m done for today. Pretty simple easy relaxing and rejuvenating day. Just what the doctor ordered.

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So. Y’all remember that one of my goals for this 2018 was to read more and do social media less, right? Well two of the books on my list to read are here! The School of Greatness by Lewis Howes and Tribe of Mentors by Tim Ferriss. I chose these two because I listen to their podcasts and their whole thing is about getting you to be the best you that you can be. I need more of that in my life. I have a tribe and we push each other to be better but some outside help can’t hurt.

Oh yeah, I know I’ve said this a bunch but find.your.tribe! Whether online or in person. Having a group of people that have your back is immeasurable. I mean you push them, they push you. When you’re down they can encourage you and vice versa. You need people in your life that will tell you the truth even if it hurts your little feelings.

Okay so back to my reading list. These books were supposed to be the first books of the year but Fire and Fury by Michael Wolff was delivered first so I dove into that. I can’t wait to dive into these chapters and discover a better version of myself.

Since the beginning of the year I have been slowly weaning back on my social media consumption. I just feel like I waste so much time just scrolling through my feeds replying, liking, posting and reposting stuff. That time could be better spent working on myself. I hav a few projects that I want to start and get going this year and wasting time is not one of them. Mind you, all the time I spend on social media is not a waste. I do use it to learn and research and stuff but I also use it as a procrastination tool when I should be doing more productive things. So I won’t be having a total social media blackout but definitely a cutback of sorts. Since I’ve cut down I have been more productive. I’ve already started working on my new clothing line, Icons & Dons (iconsanddons.com). I’ll be specializing in fine premium men’s accoutrements. Accoutrements? yeah, just a fancy french word for accessories. Did I tell y’all I’m learning and studying french? No? Well, I’m learning and studying french.

That’s it. Back to my books. Bye

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Yep, you read that right. Today is my birthday. I’m a year older, wiser and all that jazz. We made it y’all! I don’t really feel any different today than I did yesterday. Maybe it will get me tomorrow. Of course, since it’s a new year it’s time to reflect on the good and bad of last year. I don’t like to dwell on bad stuff so I’ll just stick with the good and what I learned. Knowing me and the way my mind works I’m sure I’ll find something bad to slip in. Every loss is a lesson though, right? No bad juju/vibes over this way. Let’s just hop right into it. Keep in mind that these are in no particular order. Well kinda. Just writing them as they come back to my memory.

1. I beat cancer. Fuck you, cancer! Yep, I beat that motherfucker’s ass! Sorry for the language but that’s kind of a big deal.

2. I got a promotion (sorta) at my job. I moved into a different and more challenging role that fits my character and demeanor better. The crazy thing is, I didn’t even have to apply for it. My former supervisor heard about the position, thought I would be a great fit for it and talked to my current manager about me before the position even posted internally. See, when you do good for people they will in turn do good things for you. I looked out for her when I didn’t have to and she looked out for me when she didn’t have to.

3. I started writing. Again. I got back into getting my feelings, thoughts and emotions out from within my brain on to a pen and pad. I actually physically write these blogs before I type them up for the innanetz. I write here and over on my main spot mysincerethought.com.

4. I started a podcast. I mean it’s on hiatus right now but I did start one dammit. It’s called “Sincere Chats” and I talk to people that I find inspiring and interesting. I do plan to pick it back up in 2018. I stopped because I couldn’t find my true direction. First it was all about interviews then I switched to tidbits of news segments to get you caught up on the week. Then I switched to recaps of TV shows and movies. I just couldn’t find my niche. I’m taking it back to my original idea and I’m gonna kill it. Just watch. I have some other things in the works as far as podcasting as well but I don’t want to count my chickens before they hatch. I think that’s how you say it.

5. I’m seeing a therapist. I’ve done this before in the past but I was never able to find someone that looks, acts and thinks like me. Very refreshing. Anytime you can get some help and talk to someone that truly understands and gets you is a plus. If you’re on the fence about seeking professional counseling or help, just do it! You’re welcome. I’m also working on some type of program where we can either work with therapists to help offset some of the costs or find a way to make it affordable in some other capacity. I know that is a major reason why people don’t seem help. Money is a major issue. Thankfully I have insurance and the extra income to support it because umm… Shit ain’t cheap. We gotta bring awareness and let other black people know that it’s okay to seek counseling. Depression and mental illness is not just a white or rich thing and we can’t just pray everything away. Faith without works is dead.

6. I got to see Jay-Z live. This was one of the highlights of the year and I almost forgot about to mention it! Jay is one of my favorite rappers/businessmen. I listen to at least one Jay-Z album everyday! I try and slip in some of his lyrics in every conversation I have just to see if people notice. If you follow my other account on Instagram, I do this thing called hip hop quote of the day. I basically take a line or two from song and rephrase it. I think 95-98% are Jay-Z quotes. To see him live was phenomenal and I loved every minute of the concert. I even wrote about it here. I don’t go out to many concerts much due to ya know, being an introvert and all but I had to go to this one! I’m so glad I did.

I’m really trying to think of what else happened this year. I’m legit boring so not much happens in my life. I go to work and come home pretty much. Well, now it’s work, home, gym and back home.
I feel like those were the big things that happened this year. If I think of more I may do a part 2 or something. Anyway, enjoy the rest of your day and make 2018 greater than 2017!

Peace!

Share Is Caring, Tell a friend to tell a friend:

I think I’m a good guy. I mean I treat people fairly. I try and live by the golden rule, ya know the one about treating everyone the same way that you’d want to be treated. That one. So when I invite people into my inner sanctum and they violate that trust it hurts. I mean it cuts me deeply. As fellow introverts, or if you’re not an introvert, you know how hard it is to open up to people and truly trust them to the point that you allow them into your inner circle. Sure, I have associates or counterparts but very few friends. If I consider you a friend or, even higher on the totem pole, framily then you have a duty and responsibility to take care and nurture this friendship. We must protect this house!

Last week I realized that I had an infiltrator hidden among the crew. A Judas if you will. No, I’m not saying I’m Jesus. I’m just using that as an example that I had someone that was close to me that betrayed me by bringing some unwarranted and unnecessary foolishness to my peaceful world. I was already having issues controlling my emotions and temper already so this kind of made things worse.

I don’t like to argue. At all. Especially if it is an opinion of something or someone. I feel like I will state my case, you state yours and at the end of the day we will more than likely agree to disagree and move on. You will understand why I feel a certain way and if you presented your points correctly, I will understand why you feel the way you do. We shake hands and go get some tea or something. The point is that we move on.

I had someone disrupt this by bringing a private conversation to the forefront. I don’t like to argue in a public forum. A wise man name Shawn Corey Carter once said, and I’m sure a wise man told this to him, “Don’t argue with fools. Cause people from a distance can’t tell who is who”. He also said “Don’t bark up that tree, that tree will fall on you. I don’t know why your advisers ain’t forewarn you. Please not Jay, he’s not for play”. So, yeah. I don’t argue with people in public forums but if I have to please know your shit. I love to research. I read and google is my friend.

Anyway, this person decided to do just that. Once they realized that they could not win and knew that I wouldn’t debate them in the open, because well like I said before I’m not here for the back and forth, they felt like it was a good idea to bring the discussion to not only one but two different digital platforms. Yeah, they tried it. Thankfully I have friends and framily that know me and know how I roll and stepped in and set this person straight. I thank and love you guys for that.

This thing really hurt me y’all. I thought I could trust this person and that they were truly my friend. When someone betrays me it cuts me. Cuts me deep. I am not afraid to say it. I have emotions, we all do. Some just suppress them while others don’t. I had to step away from social media and really reflect and reevaluate who I consider to be a friend and why. Like I said, my circle is very small and I only allow certain people in. To have to go through and literally reexamine almost each and every one of my friends was and is disheartening. I shouldn’t have to do that. I shouldn’t be going through this, especially not right now. I’m too old to be out here making new friends all willy nilly so my circle will continue to decrease.

Now, during my hiatus of sorts. It was only a few days but it was long enough for me to reflect and realize that I’m better than this. I need to step out of my shell and stick up for myself. I am not an arguer. I was taught the fine art of debate. ya know point, counterpoint. Statement then rebuttal. I already know going into the conversation that I am not going to change your mind, my goal is to help you understand why you are wrong and I am right. That’s it. I will never disrespect you, your like minded friends or your beliefs. That’s just not how I was raised. I was raised to respect other people’s beliefs and opinions even if they differ from mine. I was taught to try and understand why they feel or believe what they believe and use my words to articulate to them why it is that I feel and believe what it is that I hold true. Words mean things. Yes, words matter. While how you say things weighs heavily, what you say is important as well. I’d say 60/40 how and what.

As an introvert, I often times shy away from confrontation. I do this for a few reasons;

1. I often find it pointless to yell and scream about an opinion. My mom told me a long long long time ago that opinions are like noses. Everyone has one some are just bigger than others. My opinion or thoughts are no more valid than yours and yours are no more valid than mine.

2. I give you facts. Facts are indisputable. So there is no need to argue. If there are 5 red balloons and I tell such as a fact than your argument of there being 3 and not five is invalid so therefore we have nothing else to discuss. it is a fact that there are 5 so any other argument is senseless. I don’t have time for senseless things or senseless people. Like I said earlier, Google is my homie. We tight.

3. I don’t like undue or due attention on myself. I don’t like other people involved in my business that have no reason to be in my business. If you want that type of attention or heat on you than go right ahead and argue with yourself because I’m not here for the shenanigans.

Damn, I feel like I’ve said enough. Bottom line, You never know who your true friends are until politics and/or race gets involved. I believe it was the great poet O’Shea Jackson, Sr that said “Check yo self before you wreck yo self cause I’m bad for your health”.