HD I love that saying it's so true. I am going to have to dig deep inside myself to let go of this. It's not hurting him, it's hurting me. He said he feels like I am in labor and he knows I am in pain but can't do anything to help me. I guess that's partly true.

I really just want to run away for a month but I couldn't do that to my babies. They are the only joy I have right now. For some reason the cheating has really taken hold this last couple weeks and I hate it. I am depressed and all I want to do is sleep.

Ironically my head knows that is was all physical. He hired prostitutes. There were no emotional affairs. He was starting one but I had the pleasure of meeting her and she was a train wreck. She actually helped his case in showing me how sick he really was. MY HEAD knows my HEART is broken. That sums it up and when he does make mistakes I guess I am just sick of it. We've been together for 14 years and he has taken my kindness as a weakness. Unfortunately there is no benefit of the doubt left for him.

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