Stomachs may have turned when the video of Alicia Silverstone feeding her son directly from her mouth first hit the interwebs, but the actress says she doesn't give a frickity fuck what y'all think. "I wasn't saying this was anything somebody should do," she said. "I wasn't trying to be independent or cause such a ruckus. I'm very glad that I did it." Explaining that premastication is no big deal and that "people have been feeding their kids that way for thousands of years" she says her son Bear is kind of obsessed with it and is prepared to rip that food from her mouth with his bare hands if she doesn't come up with the goods. "He attacks my mouth and I think it's adorable," she added. "He also knows how to use his hands and he also eats regular food, so when babies are weaning, he still breast-feeds. Some people think that's disgusting, too, which is insane." Her son is clearly very lucky — she's an all-you-can-eat human buffet! [Daily Mail]

If there was ever a day to feel warmly towards Kim Kardashian it's today, after she delivered a pretty awesome comeback during a court hearing. Somehow getting tangled in the suit after a rival beauty company said she had incorrectly praised hair removal company TRIA, Kim delivered the line we should all now think of whenever we see her picture: "Being Armenian and hairy, I thought [it] was the perfect product." [TMZ]
This should really be her overbearing mom's concern, but Khloe Kardashian is worried that Kim's new thing with Kanye West is going to hurt her in the divorce. [Radar]
Much like discussion of their ill-fated marriage, the relentless talk about the wedding gifts Kim and Kris Humphries received refuses to die. [Page Six]
By the by: Kim will not file a formal police report agains charges against the woman who assaulted her with flour. [Radar]

That's it, it's time for us all to quit our jobs and huddle ever closer to the home computer because Betty White decided to join Twitter. Amassing just under 100,000 followers at the time of going to press, she's already cranking out the goods with a little slutty flirting sent Ryan Seacrest's way: "Hey @RyanSeacrest - my new show airs tomorrow and I hear we're in the same time slot. I've always dreamed of sharing a night with you..." [NYDN]

Once again proving herself to be the relatable, down-to-earth gal we've come to know and love, Jennifer Lopez decided to rent an entire LA beach so she could swim with her kids – blocking locals and non-specials from taking a dip. Apparently it only costs $925 to rent out Long Beach's Marine Beach, so you all know what that means? Beach party blowout! [TMX]

Settle in with some popcorn because the Melissa Etheridge/Tammy Lynn divorce battle is gearing up to be epic. First Tammy said she wasn't receiving enough spousal support and now Melissa is hitting back by saying that Tammy burned one of their kids with a cigarette. "Furthermore, the children have allergies and I am concerned about their exposure to second-hand smoke," she added in her court statement. Smoking kills… happy families. [E!]

She may have questionable taste when it comes to men, but Rihanna's vocalized a crush we can all co-sign, saying she could barely keep it in her pants while working alongside her Battleship co-star, Alexander Skarsgard. "Alexander Skarsgard is so hot," she said. "I had to keep my game face. I could stare at him all day long. I was just watching him on set." [Page Six]

Here is Bobbi Kristina doing a bong hit. The upsetting part is not that she's smoking pot, it's that she's hanging out with creeps who record her smoking and sell the video to tabloids. [Radar]

Amanda Bynes continues her tour of bad PR by hitting the bars, but not drinking, in the days following her DUI arrest. [Page Six]

The audience of Dancing With The Stars must have reeked of vanilla (fourth story down, y'all) the other day, because Jennifer Love Hewitt was making her move on he-hulk Maksim Chmerkovskiy. "[She was] trying to get Maksim's attention. She was wearing a skintight dress, sitting front-row and smiling at him all night," said some breathless observer, who added that she told host Tom Bergeron she was rooting "for Maks." Let's hope it paid off and she lost that "for" soon after. [Page Six]

Less amusing Dancing With The Stars news: Melissa Gilbert suffered a concussion and whiplash after hitting her head on the ballroom floor. [Access Hollywood]

In a frankly bizarre casting move, Alex Rodriguez is being courted to play a drag queen in upcoming Salvador Dali film, The Surrealist. [Page Six]

Nicki Minaj says that, aside from a wig collection that would put most drag queens to shame, she shares few similarities Lady Gaga. [Page Six]

Explaining that Meryl Streep inspired her to become an actress, Penelope Cruz goes on to say that she's basically a stalker and can't resist pouncing on her whenever the chance arises. [NYDN]

Brace yourselves for a celebrity chef shit-fight because Anthony Bourdain just called Paula Deen "greedy" among other things. [NYDN]

We're going to be hearing a lot about this in coming weeks: The jury have been selected for the murder trial of William Balfour, aka the man accused of killing Jennifer Hudson's mother, brother and nephew. [E!]

Proving once again to be pretty irritating despite their cause, PETA have a bitch about Jennifer Lawrence after she joked about skinning squirrels. [E!]

James Franco is lip-synching his way further into our hearts – though that sensation could be a rare parasite – with Rihanna's "You Da One." [E!]

Shannen Doherty may regret hurting her parents during her "bad girl" days but surely they understood how entertaining it was for the rest of us. [People]

She was criticized for looking skinny and now Miley Cyrus is copping shit for revealing she's on a gluten-free diet. [Us]

Admit it, you have been longing to see vintage video of Thomas Jane dressed as a woman and humping the air. Today's your day. [TMZ]

Just pipping Jessica Simpson at the post timing-wise, her ex, Tony Romo, had a baby last night – well, with the help of his wife, Candice Crawford. [Ministry Of Gossip]

Party like it's 1992: The Red Hot Chili Peppers will be headlining Lollapalooza. [AP]

It's official: Gary Ross will not direct Catching Fire, the Hunger Games sequel. There are no hard feelings between Ross and the studio; after all, the first flick has made over $300 million — Ross explains: "As a writer and a director, I simply don't have the time I need to write and prep the movie I would have wanted to make because of the fixed and tight production schedule." Who will tackle Panem next? [LA Times]