Relationships

6 simple ways to improve your marriage

Relationships

6 simple ways to improve your marriage

Marriage isn't always easy. Walking down the aisle and saying "I do" was one thing; making your union work for the long haul is another. But keeping your partnership thriving can be easier than you think. With a small amount of effort, it's possible to make some major improvements to your marriage.

We turned to Susanne M. Alexander, a marriage coach and author of Pure Gold: Encouraging Character Qualities in Marriage (Marriage Transformations, 2005), to get her insight into some simple but effective ways to make your marriage even better.

1. Lighten up and use humourOne of the easiest and most effective ways to improve your marriage and build a better bond with your spouse is to stop taking each other so seriously. Instead, focus on making one another smile. "Look for ways to light up each other's smile and create happy laughter between you," says Alexander. The more you avoid dwelling on the negative and instead do things that make you happy as a couple, the better off you'll be. "Couples who have fun together are more likely to stay connected," she explains.

2. Engage in thoughtful serviceWe don't always realize how important simple acts of kindness can be when it comes to improving relationships. Saying "please" and "thank you," doing a chore your partner hates and giving an unsolicited back rub can all go a long way toward strengthening your marriage. "Paying attention and acting to make each other's lives smoother and easier reduces friction and tension in your home," Alexander explains. "Doing nice things for one another helps you both feel grateful for each other and what you have."

3. Express loveThis might seem obvious, but once you've been together for several years, you can begin to forget how critical it is to vocalize your feelings. Telling your partner how much you care for him is a small gesture with big impact. "It is vital to know and share the words and actions that regularly let one another know you actively feel love for each other," says Alexander. "Feeling secure in each other's love allows you to have confidence in the health of your marriage." Don't assume your partner knows how you feel; make a point to regularly show him.

Page 1 of 2 -- Discover how simple words of encouragement help strengthen your marriage on page 24. Provide encouragementEveryone needs some words of encouragement, whether they seem like they could use a boost or not. Offering that in your marriage can help bring you and your spouse closer. "Life can easily become too full or very difficult, and confidently expressing support, noticing each other's sincere efforts and celebrating accomplishments are vital for a good marriage connection," Alexander explains. The more you can motivate each other, the happier you're likely to be.5. Savour intimacyOur rushed, over-scheduled lives can often make it hard to find time for intimacy, but it's important to make that part of your marriage a priority. "Touch -- through holding hands, hugging, gentle strokes, kissing and sex -- helps you both relax and feel cared for and appreciated," says Alexander. Make sure this happens by scheduling alone time and by cutting out items on your to-do list that aren't necessities. "Set up a regular time to be together as a couple to nurture your marriage," suggests Alexander.

6. Keep growing individuallyBeing married doesn't mean you no longer have your own life. Yes, you and your spouse are a team and enjoy spending time together, but making time for solo pursuits can benefit your relationship. "Having experiences apart from each other that help you improve individually will help enrich your time together," Alexander says.

Doing things separately means you will have new information and insights to share, and this type of growth can flow into growth as a couple, she explains. "Set goals to improve individually and together to keep your marriage alive."

Every marriage has its ups and downs, but making a few small changes can create a big impact when it comes to improving your relationship. A little bit of effort can go a long way toward minimizing conflict and keeping your partnership on solid ground.

Culture & Entertainment

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

Culture & Entertainment

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

Whether you're on the hunt for a thoughtful gift that's sure to impress or simply a gift that can be delivered, your answer is easy: Go for subscription boxes.

They're trending hard in the gift department. So, what are subscription boxes exactly? Basically, there's a company out there (yes—in Canada, too!) that will bundle up specific things you're interested in and deliver them in a package right to your door. No matter what your thing is—beauty, sweets, wine, more wine—there's a subscription box for you.

Think about the people on your list and narrow down what makes them tick. Beauty buff? Get her a subscription to GLOSSYBOX. Goop-enthusiast? Mama Earth Organics. Coffee Lover? The Roasters Pack. Sweet tooth victim? Bakers Krate.

Treat your mom to Oh Mother's boxes, which will deliver pampering products to ensure she gets a little "me" time. For your daughter, Ellebox will help her get through that gloomy time of month, for the bookworm, Owl Box offers new young adult books and fun extras, and for the relative who's going through a difficult time, Caring Crate will help keep their spirit up.

And there's still plenty more subscription boxes to choose from.

Flip through the slideshow to find out some of the best boxes available to Canadians and learn about what each one has to offer.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the Gwyneth in the group

Perfect for the Gwyneth-type—the one who juggles it all and is devoted to healthy, organic goods—will go crazy for this monthly subscription service. Mama Earth Organics offers healthy foods and fresh produce from local organic farms and will deliver right to her door.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the one who can't come home for the holidays

Ensure your friend who's out-of-the-country doesn't get too homesick this holiday season with Expack's Canada box. It boasts classic Canadian treats—like ketchup chips, Coffee Crisps, and Flakies—that are beloved by everyone north of the border.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the one with the sweet tooth

She'll probably be equally happy and mad at this gift: Bakers Krate delivers locally-sourced freshly baked goods (including cookies, brownies, and cupcakes), made by Canadian artisans, right to her front door.

Winning gift idea: Subscription boxes for everyone on your list

For the beauty buff

Help your beauty-loving bestie stay in-the-know with the classic, latest and greatest beauty finds with GLOSSYBOX. It brings makeup, hair, and skincare products to consumers’ doorsteps around the globe.

Culture & Entertainment

Nelly Furtado helps us be a little greener

Culture & Entertainment

Nelly Furtado helps us be a little greener

The singer-songwriter and philanthropist comes clean on her ten-year job as a housekeeper, why she finds cleaning therapeutic, when she taught her daughter to do laundry and why she has teamed up with Tide purclean to launch its new eco-friendly detergent.

Canadian singer-songwriter Nelly Furtado grew up in the family business—the cleaning business. “I come from a housekeeping background. My mom ran a laundry and cleaning company, and from a young age, I would go along with her to help out on odd jobs,” says Furtado. For the Grammy-award winner, lending a hand with the housekeeping turned into her first decade-long job. “I was a professional housekeeper at a hotel for 10 years in Vancouver,” says Furtado.

So, when Tide approached Furtado to help launch purclean—their first bio-based detergent (65% of the ingredients are made using renewable energy sources, such as plants)—the decision was an easy one. This more eco-friendly option is also hypoallergenic, free of dyes, chlorine and phosphates, and is produced in an environmentally-friendly manufacturing site.

Along with using a more sustainable detergent, Furtado limits the amount of loads she does per week and uses energy-saving cold water. “Every little bit counts: I drive a hybrid car so I only have to fill up on gas once a month. I make my own cleaning products with vinegar and water. When I’m spring cleaning or moving, I donate everything from faucets and cabinets to furniture to Habitat for Humanity so they can reuse them instead of putting them in a landfill,” says Furtado.

Furtado taught her daughter, Nevis, who is now 13-years-old, how to do laundry when she was 10-years-old. “At the time, she was saving up to buy an iPad, so Furtado gave her a list of chores to do, including laundry, to save enough money for the big purchase. “I felt I was teaching her a really valuable skill that she’ll use into adulthood, but she already mastered it at a young age. She’s really good at folding, too,” says Furtado.

Along with raising a teenage daughter and managing a successful music career (she has sold 16 million albums), she is committed to her environmental and humanitarian philanthropic work. This year, she helped host We Day, an event that empowers kids to contribute to positive changes in their communities, as well as acknowledging many who do. She also remains very close to the organization, Free The Children—she has helped raise $1 million dollars for a new all-girls school in Narok in rural Kenya. This Christmas, Nelly will visit the girls at the school.

In March 2018, Furtado will release her seventh album, The Ride. Most of the songs were written outside the studio while doing other things, such as laundry or in a car ride in Kenya during one of her Free The Children missions.

These days, when she’s not travelling, Furtado continues to clean her own house as she finds it puts her in a meditative mood, giving her the opportunity to focus on her music. “It’s part of who I am,” says Furtado.

Beauty

These lip balms will make you forget dry, chapped lips

Beauty

These lip balms will make you forget dry, chapped lips

Cold temperatures and harsh winds can take a toll on your lips—and there is nothing sexy about a chapped mouth. The good news? Our favourite lip balms can help eliminate dry, sore and chapped lips. These affordable picks range from $4 to $32.