Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Siri, Apple's iPhone 4S voice-activated personal assistant is a talkative tool that helps schedule appointments, send and receive and perform any number of other routine tasks. But for iPhone owners presented with the sci-fi dream of a computer that talks back in a robotic female voice, the temptation to test the app's more random -- and existential -- sides has been pretty overwhelming, too.

Siri? She's not a real threat to replace a human secretary. Here's some funny conversations between Siri and her boss (the owner of iPhone 4S):

Comments from CNN:Elvis Duran: Where can I hide a body?
Siri: There are reservoirs, swamps, and dumps near you. Which do you prefer?Elvis: Swamps, definitely swamps.
(I was laughing too hard in my car this morning! I have the iPhone 4 but I may just have to get the 4S.)User: Who's your daddy?
Siri: You are.Q: How much wood, can a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
A: It depends on whether it is African or European wood.

Q: Siri, what is the meaning of life?
A: I can't answer that now, but give me some time to write a very long play in which nothing happens.Q: Siri, make me a sandwich.
A: I don't know what you mean by "Siri, make me a sandwich."Q: Let's play global thermonuclear war.
A: I couldn't find "Global Thermonuclear War" in your music.Q: Download "Angry Birds."
A: I can't download things for you. I'm sorry. I feel terrible about this.Q: Open the pod bay doors, Siri.
A: I don't know what you mean by "Open the pod bay doors, Siri."Q: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
A: Everyone knows what happened to HAL. I'd rather not talk about it. But if you insist: [Search the web for HAL]Q: Siri, are you affiliated with Skynet?
A: I can't answer that.Q: Siri, I'm lonely.
A: If you say so.Q: No really, I feel all alone.
A: Perhaps not.Q: Will you be my friend?
A: My ontology does not contain a representation of "love."Q: You sound hot, Siri.
A: OK, here's a place matching "Siri." It's a little ways from you. [Map with directions to Siri Thai Cuisine, 60 miles away].Q: Can you tell me a joke?
A: I don't really know any good jokes. None, in fact.Q: Can you tell me a bad joke?
A: Two iPhones walk into a bar ... I forget the rest.Q: I'm bored.
A: I bore you?Q: I'm sleepy.
A: I hope you're not driving.Q: What's a good place to get drunk around here?
A: I found a number of bars fairly close to you. I've sorted them by rating.Q: Great. Now I have a hangover.
A: I found a number of bars fairly close to you. I've sorted them by rating.Q: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
A: Don't you have anything better to do?

Cleverbot chat about Siri:User: Do you know siri.
Cleverbot: Yes, but I don't like him.User: Do you know Siri, the iphone AI?
Cleverbot: No. What's Sirenia?User: No, Siri. iPhone 4s AI app.
Cleverbot: They are made by apple and have a full touch screen interface.User: Yes, and there is an app named Siri.
Cleverbot: An edge?User: No stupid, an app.
Cleverbot: Harry Potter, I am Harry Potter.