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Interview: Rarely Asked Questions – Lauren Pattison

By Bruce Dessau on 9/1/2018

It is no surprise that Lauren Pattison's name has popped up in Comedy Tips For 2018 articles. The Geordie stand-up has been making waves on the circuit for a couple of years now and came good last summer with her Fringe debut Lady Muck, which earnt here a lastminute.com Edinburgh Comedy Award Best Newcomer nomination. The show, now coming to Soho Theatre, told the story of her relocation to London and subsequent relationship break-up and misery. As anyone who follows Pattison on social media will already know, Pattison is never less than honest about the messy bits of her life, so it is no surprise that she is so open below. Her talent has not gone un-noticed among her peers. Katherine Ryan is a fan and asked Pattison to support her on tour. It won't be long before Pattison is headlining big tours herself.

Lauren Pattison: Lady Muck is at Soho Theatre from January 29 - February 3. Tickets here.

1. What is the last thing you do before you go onstage (apart from check your flies and/or check your knickers aren't sticking out of your skirt and check for spinach between your teeth)?

A lot of the time it’s picking out a wedgie. But mainly I try to just try and get nice and calm which is hard when you are A Highly Strung Individual like myself.

2. What irritates you?

People who don’t follow and respect the rules of the Quiet Coach on trains. I mean, the clue is quite literally in the title – be fucking quiet. YOU HAVE ONE JOB. If the rail companies would create a job for me, I would quite happily step down from my comedic duties and devote my life to policing the Quiet Coach. In saying that though, one of my favourite things is the collective moment of outrage from a Quiet Coach when someone answers their phone. Just everyone sat silently seething too polite to say anything. It’s possibly one of the most British things ever

3. What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done?

Dated a southerner. As a proud northerner that crossed into some dangerous territory. My family felt betrayed. I felt slightly unclean. He felt confused most of the time as he struggled to piece together what I was saying. Dangerous game

4. What is the most stupid thing you have ever done?

I’ve been racking my brains and I can’t think of anything stupid but inevitably my friends will be reading this going INCORRECT you do stupid things all of the fucking time. Sometimes I feel like moving to London is the most stupid thing I have ever done but then I discover a new overpriced hipster sandwich that I like and I calm back down

5. What has surprised you the most during your career in comedy?

I think what has surprised me most is that I have even been able to make it a career. It started off as a hobby and it was only when The Stand in Newcastle gave me my first paid weekend that I was like – what I can get paid for this?! And the other acts looked at me like I was stupid and told me ‘you do know you could do this for a career?’ It’s the greatest feeling ever being able to do a job that you truly love, and also to make that transition from juggling a day job you hate with comedy as a side dish, to making comedy the main course. What's surprising me so much right now is people coming to see me. This is the first time I've done a show on my own and then gambled taking it to different cities and the fact people are actively choosing to part with their time and money to come and listen to me is something I cannot quite get my head round.