confused and alone

Hey everyone, so I have something big I need help on. My boyfriend of a year and a half broke up wit me a week ago, saying that he met someone new bt hours later begs me to take him back, that he was being stupid and it was a mistake. He said he made up the whole liking someone else and still loves me. I want to believe him bt it hurts a lot, I just don't know how u make something up like that and hurt someone you love. I've asked his brother and he told me he is suffering and he realizes wat a mistake he's made and to believe him. I do love him but I don't know what to do. I want him back but I don't want to seem like I've forgivin him so easily. Can experienced people please give me feedback or past experiences to help me out?

Is this at all typical of the way he acts? Has he does other sort of erratic things, just on other subjects or is this totally out of his norm?

It sounds false to me. Sorry, but I'd bet the other person shot him down so he tucked tail and ran back to you. Honestly, if nothing yet had happened and he broke up with you to take a shot at someone else, that's actually rather admirable in an odd way. Most guys would go after the next woman first and then dump you if it succeeds. The problem is that I don't think you are being given the truth to make a decision to base your actions on.

If you have had an otherwise good relationship with few bumps, I don't know if I'd throw in the towel just yet. At least I'd buy some time and see if there's any way you can ask around and get more of the story. If nothing really happened, and this was not in any way a pattern of his normal actions, it would be hard to tell you to stay broken up with him without knowing more. Ya know?

This was our first breakup in the realtionship and I don't know who else he couldve told or knows about this besides his parents and the girl,a friend of ours. But if I ask the girl I don't know if she'll act as though she doesn't know what I'm talking about.

Well, I hate to say this but I would -- assuming I still loved him -- give him a second chance if he was another wise dependable, good guy. But, having said that, I might be a bad person to listen too. I gave someone way too many chances in my life. So I've learned there needs to be boundaries. So if you do decide to take him back, set the ground rules and be ready to stand by them. After this, he can't make a second mistake of this level and get away with it or he knows he has you.

On the other hand, if you instincts are telling you to let it go, trust them. That's where I messed up. I knew I should have gone much sooner. So if that inner voice is talking to you, please listen.

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ja3min (09-09-2012)