The arrival of a new baby, especially a first child, is an extremely significant event in a couple’s life that brings much joy, but also new responsibilities and challenges for parents. Dividing household tasks may help the transition into parenthood and ensuring that household duties are still taken care of in a way that is fair. Secondly, couples often have less time to be intimate, and lack of sleep and fatigue are contributors, so communicating with your partner about this is crucial. Finding time to connect with your partner may be more difficult with less time on your hands, but try to find pockets of time during the course of the days and evenings where this is possible – such as when the baby is sleeping.

As always, develop a plan that works for you – there is no one “right” way to rekindle the spark after the birth of a baby, and each couple needs to be in tune with their own feelings as well as their partner’s feelings in order to find a plan that works.

Here are some tips for working through any form of relationship problem:

Talk it out: Turn your phones off and have a discussion with your partner, without raising your voice. Focus on ways to improve your relationship for the future instead of dwelling on the past.

Stop the blame game: Try not to blame each other for contributing to the problem, and instead, be open to each other’s feelings and concerns. Take joint responsibility and work together.

Take it step by step: Fixing problems in relationships takes hard work. Instead of trying to solve it all in one evening, try to tackle one concern or area of a conflict at a time, and celebrate your accomplishments along the way.

Accept the bad and acknowledge the good: Find the best in your partner, and accept them for who they are. Look for the “upside” in things that they do that may annoy you.

Continue the courtship: Do the things that you used to do when you first started dating, like complimenting each other, showing interest in each other’s day, giving gifts for no reason at all and making special effort to say thank you. Try to have some time each week to do something together. These simple actions show how much you value your relationship.

Call in the professionals: Sometimes, seeking professional help when the problems get too tough is necessary. Getting help from a neutral person can help you work your way through issues.