Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, did not respond.

The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.

Again, there was no response.

Pissed at the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said gruffly, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader or I will open fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't want to do that! I really think that will make him mad."

"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon and opened fire.

There was a huge explosion.

A massive fireball roared towards him and blew the younger alien off his feet and threw him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 metres away in a cactus patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you never screw with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear".

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Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader."

The gas pump, of course, did not respond.

The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.

Again, there was no response.

Pissed at the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said gruffly, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader or I will open fire!"

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't want to do that! I really think that will make him mad."

"Rubbish," replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon and opened fire.

There was a huge explosion.

A massive fireball roared towards him and blew the younger alien off his feet and threw him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 metres away in a cactus patch.

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you never screw with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear".

OH SNAP!!!!

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After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!! Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

Can't Stop This Thing We Started one tree hill dvdThe first four seasons of the show focus on the main characters' high school years. With the beginning of the fifth season, Schwahn decided to skip the timeline four years ahead, showing their lives after college. how i met your mother dvdI'm sure there were those who watched tonight's episode "Hopeless" that were left feeling much like Barney did while fishing. Sons of anarchy dvdSuffice to say in the Season 3 premiere of Sons of Anarchy, there was a lot of reaction to the Season 2 closer. The Office DVD The Office was adapted for American audiences by executive producer Greg Daniels, a veteran writer for Saturday Night Live, King of the Hill, and The Simpsons. Supernatural DVD Supernatural is an American supernatural and horror television series created by Eric Kripke, which debuted on September 13, 2005 on The WB, and is now part of The CW's lineup.

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Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often students, for heaven's sake. - Terry Pratchett