Did you know that only EIGHT percent of New Year's resolutions actually get achieved? Crazy right? Remember that time I made an epic New Year's resolution to post a blog every week? Well.... I'm definitely not part of that 8%.

So where have I been you ask? Suffering the miserable life of an undergraduate college student taking two too many classes, working one too many jobs and having the joy of commuting between two equally as dysfunctional households on different sides of one giant lake. Woe is me, lol. But it's over with. Finally!!! Somehow, I even managed to do well in school (after announcing that "everybody has a bad semester, and I'm okay that this one is mine") and even won an award for it! Oh, I went to a freezing cold New York, bleached my entire scalp, and drunk texted Molly Yeh about cheese fries in Texas in this period, too.

Rest assured, I'm not leaving again. I've missed all of my lovely internet friends way too much and will spending the next few days cooped up in bed post-wisdom teeth surgery being paranoid about dry sockets and making the rounds visiting all of your pretty blogs. :) Let's celebrate with some dessert!

A few days ago, French Market Coffee sent me a giant box of coffee and challenged me to create a killer New Orleans-themed recipe. I obviously obliged, because coffee is the sole reason why I got through this semester from hell and coffee plus dessert is the greatest combination like.... ever.

Now I know what you're thinking, Vietnamese iced coffee .... New Orleans??? Did you know that New Orleans has thriving Vietnamese population and a killer Viet restaurant scene? Did you know that my diet pretty much consists of nothing but banh mi and spring rolls? Did you know that Vietnamese is the fourth most spoken language in the entire state of Louisiana? Did you know that I just looked that up on Wikipedia? Bam.

Because Vietnamese iced coffee is the delicious marriage of chicory coffee and condensed milk, I figured I would deconstruct it and turn it into something even more delicious than the drink itself.

The result: granita sundaes. Granitas are generally served alone or with a bit of whipped cream, but I truly believe in calorie-loading so I covered mine in layers upon layers of ice cream. Condensed milk ice cream, to be exact. On top of all of that, I covered the whole deal in even more condensed milk, because why not?

I know this all sounds potentially stressful, but this dessert is super easy! The granita is literally just coffee and sugar, mixed, frozen, and sloshed around with a fork a few times. The ice cream is a no-churn situation, with only three ingredients and a quick freeze. You can even lie and act like you broke out that fancy Cuisinart ice cream maker that you've never used, I won't tell! Promise!

Brb, I'll be eating the leftover granita for the rest of my summer.

Chicory Coffee Granita

make:

In a medium-sized bowl, dissolve the sugar in the hot coffee. Once dissolved, stir in vanilla. Transfer the mixture into an 8-inch metal baking pan. Freeze the mixture, making sure to stir the mixture vigorously with a fork every 30 minutes until slushy, about 2 hours.

Condensed Milk Ice Cream

1 cup cold heavy whipping cream

1 tsp. vanilla bean paste or extract

1 (14 oz.) can sweetened condensed milk, plus extra for drizzling

make:

Using a hand mixer or stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, whip the cold heavy cream and vanilla on high until soft peaks form. Gradually add the condensed milk and continue whipping until high peaks form. Transfer the mixture into a bowl or loaf pan and freeze until set, at least four hours or overnight.

When ready to serve, layer the granita and ice cream in a bowl or coffee mug. Drizzle with extra condensed milk!

This post is sponsored by French Market Coffee. All opinions are my own and this sundae is literally amazing so don't be fooled.