It’s Not Me!

As I was walking down the boardwalk, I heard a bicycle behind me so I stepped over to my right–waiting for the cyclist to pass. It was weird cause the person was passing by so when he finally came into my line of vision he looked over his shoulder at me and smiled and I smiled back. That smile caused him to stop a ways in front of me and begin an odd conversation:

Him: (brown, beautiful, smile to warm the cockles of your heart dressed in black jogging suit and cap) HiMe: HiHim: Where you from?Me: (points to my shirt), Ghana. I was born in Ghana but live up north. In PghHim: Oh. Getting some cardio?Me: (is he gonna persuade me to join a gym?) No, just walkingHim: OkayMe: What are you doing?Him: Working off some of this fat (lifts shirt to reveal a beautiful abdomen)Me: (suitably impressed) Okay. (looks down at self) Well, we all do what we canHim: (shakes head slightly, smiles) No worries. It’s okayQuietHim: My name is Carlos…from Cuba (extends hand)Me: My name is ******.Him: So you don’t wanna walk on the beach?Me: I did, earlier–I walked down but now I’m coming back. It’s darkHim: (laughs) Are you scared?Me: (laughing) Uhm, well I am a single woman. Gotta be carefulLaughter dies downMe: Uhm, OkayQuietMe: Okay, well, it was nice meeting you. (begins to walk forward) Him: (not moving)Me: (takes bullet in teeth) Uhm, you wanna ride with me?Him: (starts pedaling)Me: (still walking, uncertain)Him: (rides ahead of me, pauses, turns) You don’t wanna go on the beach hunh?Me: I gotta get something to eatHim: (as he rides off) You gotta get your cardio…..

Him: (dark skinned brother, not so cute) Where you from?Me: (who is this?) What?Him: Where you from?Me: Up northHim: Where Boston?Me: No, midwest–PittsburghHim: You here long?Me: NoHim: (zooms away)Me: HUNH???

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Same Day,

3 hours later

Me: (right leg up, left leg down on Popsicle Orange beach towel) *hear sound and open eyes*Him (older white guy with graying hair, glasses, blowy gray shirt and grey military style shorts) : It’s beautiful!!! Me: (hmmm, you talking to me?)Him: It’s beautifulMe: (he is talking to me, be polite!) Yes, it isHim: (stretching out arms to better inhale the beauty of it all) AaaaahMe: Yup, it’s beautifulHim: (kneels down beside me)Me: (shades eyes)Him: In a little bit, it’ll be warm enough to swimMe: Oh, it’s not warm enough now?Him: Noo, not yetMe: (just didn’t realize it would be cold ’cause the sun is out and it’s….dude…Miami!) OhHim: (licks lips) Where you from?Me: (must be the going line here on Miami beach) PghHim: Aaah, da burg. Da burghMe: (slightly surprised) You know Pittsburgh?Him: (licks lips) Yeah, follow the jazz, you knowMe: (intrigued) You in a jazz group?Him: No, just, follow jazz. You know lots of good jazz comes out of PghMe: (Slightly deflated) Oh, YeahHim: (Still kneeling) SilenceHim: Yup, it’s beautifulQuiet while we both contemplate Miami’s beautyHim: Well, I just stopped by to say ‘hi’Me: Thanks!