Would Kindness Kill Us?

Would Kindness Kill Us?

The online comment box has ignited a new breed of boldness; one completely unique to our generation. It’s an ugly evolution, really, that often seems bereft of all compassion. As a rule, I don’t read online comments, but sometimes — when there are many comments — I’ll take a quick peek out of sick curiosity like, how can someone make THIS topic controversial and negative? And I always cringe within a minute. Always. There is almost always self-righteous, unbelievably judgmental, often mean comments taken out of context – no matter the topic. Most times commenters are arguing with each other. How does a cupcake post turn into a nasty entanglement of cheap-shots and obscenities? Beats me, but mostly it saddens me.

The common expression Kill Them With Kindness now really means flashing a fake smile at someone’s negativity – or don’t let anyone see that someone is getting to you, which probably isn’t the original purpose of the phrase. I’m beginning to think we are unable to dissuade negativity with authentic kindness. There’s no need when we can toss our cruel grenades anonymously online often fueled by our own insecurities then log off smugly without a care of consequences left by the grenade.

If we can’t genuinely kill with kindness, would it kill us to be a just little more kind? To consider the target first – what they might be going through, have been through?

Anger typically injures the angry, especially in the long run, but immediately the receiver of the barbs most likely feels a depth of shame and hurt that might never be known. The whole thing is a shame, one lacking courage, self respect, and mainly, humanity.

To illustrate this to a small extent, fitness blogger and personal trainer Cassey Ho made a short video where she photoshops herself based on actual comments left for her. The short video is poignant and choked me up a bit. It reminded me that if I never hear the passive aggressive spurs “just saying” or “in my humble opinion” or “no offense” again, it will be too soon. Mainly, it reminds me that it most certainly won’t kill me to be more kind and thoughtful and compassionate to everyone else trying to make it – everyone trying to get fitter, eat better, be better parents, spouses, workers; better people in general – and stumbling at all of the above, too.