It turns out your crazy, right-wing uncle has a genetic reason why he shrieks
like Chicken Little. Two new studies
find specific differences in the brains of liberals and conservatives. The
most notable conclusion is that conservative brains are wired toward simple,
emotional decision-making. This may explain why so many conservatives can only
see two answers for any question, good or bad.

Good and bad are not facts and they are not the solution to all problems.
They are value judgments, emotional in nature, different for everyone, and
limited in usefulness.

But, this sort of simplistic lizard-logic is what allows
conservatives employed in government to complain about the very taxes that paid
their salary. It is why both Christian fundamentalists and Muslim
fundamentalists can lay claim to God’s backing. And it is why river folks—who
will soon line up to collect federal flood relief—will still believe that the
federal government is useless.

Liberals have a more nuanced understanding. And this important distinction
has far-reaching consequences. Think of our current relationship with Pakistan.
On the one hand, we know that at least some Pakistani officials were complicit
in hiding Osama bin Laden. On the other hand, we need Pakistan to provide truck
routes into Afghanistan. Our troops can’t fight—or even eat—without this
critical supply line. The conservative brain responds emotionally to the “bad”
Pakistanis, and calls for cutting aid. You’ve seen it on the evening news. If we
do that, our soldiers go without food, water and bullets. The war in Afghanistan
gets vastly more expensive. Good or bad simply doesn’t provide an answer for all
questions.

An
Italian study offers even more evidence. People who held conservative views
consistently found a mythical smaller group to be inferior to a similarly
imaginary larger one. This was true even when the smaller group was described
more positively. The researchers called this “illusory correlation.” They
suggested that false memories about minorities tend to accumulate, leading to
false reasoning about minority groups. This study may help to explain the silly
idea that superiority can be determined by skin color. White supremacists are
simply dummies with self-serving memories.

Other common beliefs born from the lizard-brain are:

Hiding a gun under your shirt is a sign of bravery, rather than an act of
cowardice.

The only way one can be moral is to be instructed by some guy who
claims he speaks for God.

The poor are ruining the country because, somehow, they control public
policy.

Every attempt to perfect equal rights is a slippery slope that leads
directly to sex with animals.

Prosperity trickles down.

Cooperation for the common good is “Socialism.”

And my favorite—uneducated people have better ideas than educated
people.

These logical fallacies derive from a toggle-switch brain that can only fall
in one of two directions. If it scares me, it is bad. Otherwise, it is good.
Unfortunately, like a snarling raccoon backed into a corner, our conservative
friends aren’t even capable of understanding their real enemy is fear.
They call it “common sense.” And, of course, the problem with common sense is
that every fool believes he has it.

So the guy who is afraid to go out without a gun ironically reframes his
fearfulness as bravery or patriotism. He “trembles before God”—imagining a
petty deity who will punish anyone who fails to suck up in specific ways. But he
also relies on God to protect him and prays “God, protect us…” before every
meal. His entire belief system revolves around fear.

This permanent state of fear might well explain the entire catalogue of
faulty logic on the right. To move forward, we have to find solutions to address
these crazy, illogical fears. Start by asking your conservative friends a few
simple questions:

How can we help you be less afraid of change?

What can we do to help you believe that you won’t be left behind when
change happens?

How can we make you feel like other Americans have got your back?

Other than never changing anything, how can we make you feel safe about
your future?

Chances are they have no answers. But it’s time to start asking the right
questions anyway.

Jimmy Zuma splits his time between Washington, D.C. and Tucson. He writes the online opinion journal, Smart v. Stupid. He spent 5 years in Tucson in the early ‘80s, when life was a little slower, swamp coolers were a little more plentiful, Tucson’s legendary music scene was in full bloom, and the prevailing work ethic was “don’t - unless you have to.”

More by Jimmy Zuma

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