Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Katie Holmes' Baby Daddy is Who?

I just got this email forwarded to me and have no idea if it's true or not. However, it does sound resonable...I mean, Tom does seem to fancy penis so this makes some sense. Enjoy:

Guess what I heard:

You guys are not going to believe this... I finally found out why KatieHolmes agreed to this charade with Tom Cruise. Here's the story:

It all started when Katie was engaged to Chris Klein. Apparently, he isthe father (just wait, listen to the evidence). So, Chris Klein brokeoff the engagement and has been pretty cold ever since. Katie was eitheralready pregnant or became pregnant during their break-up and get back togetherphase (it's unclear). Katie was basically heart broken and pregnant witha baby whose father wanted nothing to do with them.

In comes Tom Cruise. It was the perfect situation: Tom is gay and needs tobe married to cover his image and Katie was in need (and Tom paid Katieto enter into this contract).

Katie and Tom began their whirlwind romance right after Katie's engagement was called off. They had to make it intense right off the bat because she didn't have a big window to "get pregnant".

Hence the couch jumping and other ridiculous acts that were done to makethe public believe that they were so in love that they just wanted tohave a baby right away.

Fast forward. Remember how quickly Katie got big and how big she was forso long??? She actually delivered the baby well before they announcedthe delivery, AND that's why they've kept the baby in hiding for 4months.

It's easy to tell that a 2 month old could not possibly be 3 weeks old, butthere's not a huge difference between a 4 month old and a 5 month old.

Got it. It's crazy and you heard it here first (Edited to add: You can really sense how worked up this chick gets with every word she types. She LOVES this shit.)

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