How come my ex hates me?

Ok, i dont get it????? How come my ex hates me now? He broke up with me, i was heartbroken and i had a real hard time dealing with the loss of our relationship.

In brief

We split up mid feb, i cried, begged pleaded etc and did all the wrong things, then backed off a bit. For a while he kept calling me (drunk) and crying, sayin he missed me blah blah blah and in the morning it was always sorry i'm not in love with you and shouldnt have called. During this time he was seeing someone else and lying about it, so when i found this out I changed my number. i just couldnt stand the pain of the emotional drunk calls which gave me a glimmer of hope, whilst knowing for sure he was with someone else.

Turns out he was lying to this new girl too saying that i wont leave him alone and cant get over him etc when he was the one to make contact!!! He's still with her i think, but now i hear he's bad mouthing me all over town when he goes out, saying how much he dislikes me and that i'm a stalker etc. I havent even spoken to him since he last called me crying, drunk as usual 4 wks ago. I was the one pleading for him to go NC so i could get over him!!

Why does he suddenly hate me? I've done nothing to him. I'm just staying away and hoping i'll get over it soon. I hate the thought that he genuinely hates me. Whats with this??? Why would he suddenly hate me??? Why would he say these nasty things when i treated him so well and he was my world, i would have done anything for him and he knows it!!!

Sorry about this rant but i just dont get it???? Argh!!!! I'm just trying to get over it, thats hard enough without the hate and bad mouthing!!!! Is it to get me to contact him about these rumours, or could he really hate my guts??

I don't know but sounds like you are well rid of him, you have to let this go and move on. Like you say, you did nothing wrong. If he is spreading lies about you that says a lot about him, at least your true friends won't believe him.

Sounds like he's hurting and your NC has really gotten to him so his pride is hurt and this is the only way he knows how to deal. Not very mature, but you can't change how people cope with things.

I understand what you're going through though. My ex is still insisting to anyone that will listen that I stalk him and won't stop bothering him, won't leave him alone, etc. even when I haven't talked to him in weeks AND threatened an RO if HE didn't leave me alone. LOL.

Its really silly tho, he found out i had a couple of dates with a guy (didnt work out for me, too soon) now wont let me have our dog when he goes on our damn holiday that we booked together, cancelled my (joint) gym membership and now hates my guts!!!!

Well thats just peachy!!!!! He wanted out, i was heartbroken NOT him!!! He doesnt love me anymore SO WHATS HIS PROBLEM??????

Ha, sorry, have exhausted all of my friends by taling about him and crying and ranting over the last few months so just need to get it off my chest here!!

God..what a PATHETIC human being he is and that YOU are rid of.
These types of posts just make my skin crawl with disgust. He is OBVIOUSLY
upset that you are not GROVELING for him to come back to him after his PATHETIC attempts to feed you crumbs of hope. Good GOD it's SO transparent. Sweetie, you have done NOTHING to provoke this moronic
'revenge rampage"..this guy CLEARLY has an ego the size of New YOrk
to keep this up....just laugh at his pathetic attempts..and keep up the good work on ERASING this LOSER from your life!!!!!!!!

You may be wasting alot of energy on someone that seems to be conducting themselves in such an unhealthy manner. He may just be seeking the drama that he seems to need in his life. If you do not react to it, it can cause you no harm.

On another thread, ScornandTorn wrote, ""shameless people will do what ever they need, no matter how irrational it is, in order to survive emotionally."

He really doesnt love me, he's told me often enough, well that he's not 'in' love with me. Its been awful for me and he knows it! For a long time i thought we would always be together, and that he was the love of my life. I'm just starting to get over it really since i've been in total NC.

Sweet Venus

Thanks for your reply, i think you're right and i guess i really didnt know how horrible he really could be until now.