Todd: Wow. We, umm...we sure don't like Justin Timberlake all of a sudden.

Clip of Super Bowl LII Halftime Show

Justin Timberlake: Let's goooooo!

Todd (VO): I mean, it's not sudden I guess. But to me, it feels like we went to some people not liking him to [shots of negative articles about Justin Timberlake] pretty much everyone not liking him overnight. I started writing this episode right after the Super Bowl performance, which...you know the reviews on that were pretty mixed. Some people thought it was just meh, but others thought it was reallymediocre.

Todd: And then in between, there's everyone who thought it was OK.

Todd (VO): I mean I mostly liked it personally. Like, yeah it was a little safe, but I enjoyed it. But even I'll concede...

Todd: ...it wasn't nearly good enough to drown out all the negative buzz. For one thing...

Todd (VO): ...he started the night off with his new single.

Justin: Put your filthy hands all over me

Todd: That was not a good sign.

Video for "Filthy"

Justin: Hey!

If you know what's good (If you know what's good)

Todd (VO): I feel kind of defensive for Justin, who's made so much music I like, but...[chuckles] I don't know what to tell you here. What am I gonna say? That this is a good song? It's not.

Todd (VO): In 2013, Justin Timberlake stopped making shitty movies long enough to drop a [cover for The 20/20 Experience] big long album with lots of fanfare. And four months after that, he released a [cover for The 20/20 Experience - 2 of 2] second big album that was even longer. [clip of "TKO"] And it's not like those albums did badly exactly, but for that much hype, it underperformed. There just wasn't enough good songs on them. Also, all of them went on too goddamn long.

Video for "Supplies"

Todd (VO): But now, after another long break, JT's finally releasing a new album. Another comeback. A comeback from the comeback almost. And the big hot first single off of it was called...

Todd: ..."Filthy."

Clip of "Filthy"

Justin: If you know what's good (If you know what's good)

Todd (VO): Now, to be honest, I don't really like this kind of single in general. I mean the video for it where he plays like a Steve Jobs type introducing his hot new robot; th-that's perfect. It makes perfect sense.

Todd: 'Cause it's the kind of song that's not even really a song. It's a product launch.

Justin: Haters gon' say it's fake

I guess I got my swagger back

Todd (VO): It's a trailer, it's a promo for the album.

Todd: It's the same trick he pulled with "SexyBack."

Video for "SexyBack"

Justin: I'm bringin' sexy back

Todd (VO): And I realize I'm sitting at a lonely table for one on this one, but...

Todd: ...I hated "SexyBack." But I completely understood why it was so big.

Todd (VO): It was less a single and more of a campaign theme. A single that says, "You're listening to me because I'm the biggest thing on the planet. It doesn't even matter if you like me or not." Timberlake 2020. Justin Christ Superstar.

Todd: Something to blast out of your tanks as you invade a country.

"SexyBack" plays over clips of Apocalypse Now

Timbaland: Come here girl

Justin: Go 'head be gone with it

Timbaland: Come to the back

Justin: Go 'head be gone with it

Lt. Col. Kilgore (Robert Duvall): [dubbed over with Todd's voice] I love the smell of sexy in the morning!

Todd: So that's the idea at least.

Clip of "Filthy"

Justin: If you know what's good

Todd (VO): [sighs] I don't think it's working for "Filthy" though. He released it a few weeks ago, and ever since he dropped that single, that single has [Close-up shot of current Billboard Hot 100 with "Filthy" at #51] dropped. Like a brick in the ocean. By the time I get this video out, it might have gone [image of...] negative platinum.

Todd: Or who knows? It might turn around, but I don't see it happening.

Todd (VO): Taylor Swift pulled this same move with her latest disaster. But even though the sales numbers were a little underwhelming, she did get some mileage out of it because Taylor Swift still holds a death grip on the public's imagination.

Todd: Justin Timberlake [clip of "Can't Stop the Feeling!"] has become a boring man who makes songs for kids' movies. But let's break it down piece by piece. Start it off.

Video for "Filthy" starts again

Justin: Hey!

If you know what's good (If you know what's good)

Todd pretends to be amazed by Justin then does a jerkoff motion

Justin: Haters gon' say it's fake

I guess I got my swagger back

Todd (VO): Look, Justin has been [clip of "Rock Your Body"] hot shit for a long time. But let's be real; Justin was [pictures of Justin from his Mickey Mouse Club and NSYNC days] lame for at least as long as he was cool. There was a window of time where he could use hip-hop slang and not sound like a trying-to-be-cool youth pastor, but we're past that.

Todd: "Got my swagger back." Pffft.

Justin: Your friends, my friends

And they ain't leavin' till six in the morning

Todd: I think even my dad knows the song those come from.

Live performance of Jay Z - "All I Need"

Jay Z: Guess I got my swagger back [17-year-old song]

Video for Snoop Dogg - "Gin and Juice"

Snoop: They ain't leavin' til six in the morning [24-year-old song]

Todd (VO): They're not like a Bruno Mars-style throwback. It's just him puking up clichés. I'm surprised he didn't add...

Todd: ..."We're gonna get jiggy with it, y'all!"

Justin: Haters gon' say it's fake

So real

Todd (VO): So, anyway...this song has to, um...

Todd: ...start at some point, right?

Justin: Haters gon' say it's...fake

Todd (VO): Come on.

Justin: Put your filthy hands all over me

No, this ain't the cleeeeeean version

What you gonna do with all that meat

Cookin' up a meeeeaaan servin'

Todd: [Beat; Todd inhales and buries hands in his face] There is way too much to unpack here.

Justin: Put your filthy hands all over me

Todd (VO): Hold on, I think I'm gonna have to, like, write an [screenshot of song lyrics] outline just to understand [brief glimpse of annotations] everything that's going on in these four lines.

Todd: Oooh! OK. Let's start with the title!

Image of "Filthy" single cover

Todd (VO): Filthy. Filthy. What do you even mean by that? Look at...[notices words above and below "Filthy By Justin Timberlake"] Wait...

Todd: ...hold on, hold on. I'm just reading the album art here. [closeup of bottom words] "...Should be played very loud." Oh, is that the problem? [shrugs] OK. Crank that shit!

Clip of "Filthy" with volume cranked up

Justin: So real

Haters gon' say it's...fake

Todd: [throwing up devil horns and banging his head] YEAHHHH!

Justin: Say it's fake

I guess I got my swagger back

Todd: YEAH! YEAH! [throws piano stool against the wall]

Justin: Your friends, my friends

And they ain't leavin'...

Todd: [jumps around a little bit before calming down] OK, volume is not really enhancing the experience here.

Dr.Frankenstein (Gene Wilder): If you're blue and you don't know where to go to

Why don't you go where fashion sits

Monster: [screams] Puttin' on the Ritz!

Back to "Filthy" video

Justin: And what you gonna do with all that beast

Todd (VO): Good God, this song is going back in time to erase...

Todd: ...every spec of cool he ever had.

Image of corny disco dude with Justin's face pasted over disco dude's head

Justin: Long as I got my suit and tie

Clip of "Filthy"

Justin: If you know what's good (If you know what's good)

Todd (VO): You know, I referenced "My Humps" earlier, but the song that it actually reminds me most of is [clip of...] "Boom Boom Pow." Just a bunch of half-baked song fragments and random sound effects that sound vaguely like hype.

Todd: It-it's just obnoxious. I really think this is a career-ender for JT.

Todd (VO): That's not like a concrete prediction or anything, but it wouldn't surprise me. 'Cause it's, uhh...

Justin: So baby, don't you...mind if I do

Exactly what you...like times two

Todd (VO): Oh, goddamnit!

Todd: Sorry, my computer's loaded down viruses or something [gets up and leaves].

Justin: Baby, don't you...mind if I do

Todd: [offscreen; sighs] Sometimes the audio feedback starts stuttering and grinding like this. I need to do, like, a full system restore or, like, buy some new equipment. I just...

Justin: Six in the morning (Six in the morning)

Todd (VO): What program is slowing everything down? Or what do I have to close? Come on!