"Madame, bear in mind That princes govern all things--save the wind." -Victor Hugo, The Infanta's Rose

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Rumblings in the Vast Wasteland

Remember that big dusty box in the living room you used to sit and stare at for hours back in the good old days of 2007? I think it's called a "television set", and it's slowly coming back to life after months of reruns and reality shows. First to return with new material since the Hollywood writers strike was settled last week will be The CW's sitcom Aliens in America, which kicks off with eight original episodes beginning March 2. By April, most programs that are coming back this season will be on the air. Since sitcoms are produced with a shorter lead time, they'll initially make up the bulk of returning shows; dramas will begin showing up in late March.

Here's a list of announced returns, courtesy of The Miami Herald:

March 2: Aliens in America (The CW).

March 3: Everybody Hates Chris (The CW).

March 17: How I Met Your Mother (CBS); The Big Bang Theory (CBS); Two and a Half Men (CBS).

March 23: The Game (The CW)

March 24: CSI: Miami (CBS)

March 30: Cold Case (CBS)

April 2: Criminal Minds (CBS); CSI: New York (CBS)

April 3: My Name Is Earl (NBC); CSI (CBS); Without a Trace (CBS)

April 4: Ghost Whisperer (CBS); Numb3rs (CBS)

April 8: NCIS (CBS)

April 10: The Office (NBC); 30 Rock (NBC); Scrubs (NBC)

April 11: Moonlight (CBS)

April 14: One Tree Hill (The CW); Rules of Engagement (CBS)

April 15: Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (NBC)

April 21: Gossip Girl (The CW)

April 22: Reaper (The CW); Law & Order (NBC)

April 24: Supernatural (The CW)

Fox and ABC still haven't issued comprehensive lists of post-strike programming, although ABC will present new episodes of Desperate Housewives and Lost this spring. Some shows won't be back; for example, the CW has canceled entertainment-news program CW Now and sitcom Girlfriends. And the network hasn't ordered new episodes of family-on-safari drama Life Is Wild, an ominous sign. On the other hand, NBC has announced that its first-year dramas Chuck and Life won't be back this spring but have been renewed for the fall. Same goes for Fox's 24.

As for me, I can't say the writer's strike affected my viewing habits at all -- which mainly consist of The Daily Show, (endless!) reruns of Law and Order, and DVD movie rentals. Still, I'm glad the strike is over and scribes can go back to work earning their measly $50,000 per episode. It ain't easy, you know. To quote the late Hunter S. Thompson, "The TV business is uglier than most things. It is normally perceived as some kind of cruel and shallow money trench through the heart of the journalism industry, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free and good men die like dogs, for no good reason. There's also a negative side."

Yes, it's a shameful, paltry sum (plus not to mention they get residuals too). No wonder they went on strike.

I've actually watched Pushing Daisies myself, and I have to admit it's a clever concept for a show. But I can't imagine being with someone you love so much and not being able to touch them. I wish we had a "Pie Hole" in our crummy little town. Have you seen their menu? Yummmm.

"Even though the writer's strike is finally over, we will be getting no new PD episodes until October, which is when Season 2 is likely to start. Most shows go back into production immediately to finish their seasons, but serialized shows like PD won't go back into production until June, when the start making episodes for Season 2. So hang in there PD fans. At least we know the wait will be worth it."

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Who Writes This Stuff?

Name:Mr. Toast

Location:Texas, United States

Sarcastic, occasionally witty ex-radio DJ/engineer and sardonic observer of life. Though mostly a practical realist, I sometimes see myself as a sensitive romantic dreamer. Other traits: easily amused; fond of tinkering with electronic objects, good food and small furry animals (not necessarily in that order); unable to leap tall buildings, in a single bound or otherwise; always a traveler, never a tourist; housebent, but not broken.