Clutter

by littledodogirl

Dear Lily,

My mind is cluttered. Our home is cluttered. I constantly feel overwhelmed and stressed. And worst of all, I’ve started fantasizing about a fire that will burn all of our stuff except for the computer (where all our pictures are stored) and your box of treasures (where I keep tiny reminders of my days with you). Yes, I am fantasizing about a fire.

That’s when I told my self, “Woman, to dream about evil events that destroy families and communities is no good. Down right gross might I add. You need a friendly fire of sorts. You need to de-clutter your life.”(side note: the wordpress dictionary apparently does not recognize the word de-clutter. BAD sign.)

So now I’m sitting here and thinking: what will my friendly fire spare? Would those things fit in a humanly managable list? My magical fire will by pass:

the Mac in the living room where all our pictures are stored.

the box on the upper shelf where I put in the outfit I brought you home in from the hospital.

the embroidery that my Mom made while pregnant with me.

the tiny Japanese figurine that my Dad got me from Japan when I was 13 (I think…) and survived two wars.

the bit of jewelry that I inherited from my Mom.

That’s it, these are the things that come to mind right now that would break my heart a bit to lose. A few more things I would be sad but not heartbroken about:

the expensive SLR that takes awesome pictures.

the 2 posters from your Dad’s escapades in high school theater.

the pictures drawn by my sisters.

the plants

I cannot believe that of all the stuff that fills our home, your childhood home, five things make my would-be-heartbroken-if-I-lost-them list, and four make the would-be-sad-to-lose-list. How telling!

Dearest Lily, your are only two (almost), and for the next few weeks you will be wondering what over took Mama that she is whirling around throwing things left and right. The de-cluttering spirit, that’s what.