Is There a Downside to Being Happy?

I sure can’t think of one. So, why not want more of it? My husband and I recently watched a documentary on Netflix called Happy, which explores human happiness through interviews with people from all walks of life in 14 different countries. I highly recommend this movie for a number of reasons, but mostly because it discusses the science behind happiness and gives a perspective of what happiness is and means in different cultures around the world. The takeaway message was simple: we all can do things to increase our levels of happiness, and what we think might make us happy is often actually not the case at all. Here is a little preview:

Two days ago I came across a conversation between Erin, Beth, and Amy about a happiness challenge called 100 Happy Days. I was intrigued and inspired. I decided to commit to the challenge and document each day a thing or things that bring me happiness. I found this challenge to be quite interesting because of what I know about the science behind happiness.

Something I have always been interested in is the positive side of human behavior and thinking. At Oregon State University, I actually developed and taught an advanced level course on Positive Psychology, where the primary focus was on the good and positive in our lives. Much of the field of Psychology is centered around cognition, emotion, and behavior in it’s negative form, and while it is important to understand where these negative processes come from, it is just as important to recognize and understand the good and positive side of being as well. Thus, the field of Positive Psychology was born.

One of the first things I had my Positive Psychology students do in the classroom was to identify their character strengths. I highly recommend you do this too – go to http://www.authentichappiness.org and complete the VIA Survey of Character Strengths – it takes some time, but is well worth it. Character strengths are universal natural strengths that require no effort, make us feel energized, and are connected to six core virtues. The more we use our strengths, the more they can lead to fulfillment, growth, self-acceptance, positive affect, stronger relations with others, and greater well-being. These strengths are classified under the six core virtues:

The students then had to complete a project where they used their top three character strengths in unique ways over the term, and to observe and evaluate how it affected them and those around them. It was fascinating to read and listen to their stories, and the overwhelmingly positive response that I received from integrating day-to-day life into the course through this assignment. My top three strengths are zest/energy, social intelligence, and hope/optimism/future mindedness.

Another thing we discussed throughout the term were the ways in which we can control and increase our own levels of happiness. According to researchers who study happiness, 50 percent of our happiness is instilled in our genetics, 10 percent is due to uncontrollable circumstances, and about 40 percent of our happiness is under our own control.

Therefore, 40 percent of our happiness depends on what we do, how we live, and day to day thoughts that play out in our interactions and behaviors. Of course researchers have jumped all over the concept of what we can control and how we can all go about being happier. Scientific attempts to boost happiness have shown that there are several things we can do, and little changes we can make on a daily basis to become happier. Some, but not all, of these things include:

1) Expressing gratitude – Writing a letter, saying thank you, keeping a gratitude journal, or just being more appreciative of what we have are all ways that we can be more grateful of what we have. Many of us may feel grateful, but outwardly showing and expressing gratitude has a much greater impact.

2) Performing acts of kindness – Volunteering or doing a good deed for another without any expectations in return has immediate effects on happiness and serves to better both parties involved.

3) Counting blessings – Write down three (or more) good things every day before going to bed. When we acknowledge and think about the good in our day, especially before we fall asleep, we are more likely to sleep soundly and wake up in a more positive mood.

4) Engaging in activities that produce FLOW – I mentioned the idea of flow in a previous post, but it is the idea that we need to take time to do the things that make us feel exhilarated and produce optimal experiences where we can perform at our best. Here is one way to think of how flow is produced – the right amount of challenge given a certain level of skill.

5) Physical activity and exercise – No surprise here. There is a plethora of research that reveals the more we integrate movement into our lives, the healthier and more energetic we will feel. Not to mention, exercise is also a buffer against mental illness and can alleviate symptoms of mild depression and anxiety.

6) Savoring and mindfulness – Often times we get ahead of ourselves and are thinking about the next task or thing we need to do before finishing the task at hand. By being mindful of the moment and/or savoring something that often is devalued, we can live more in the present and slow down. When we think too much about the past or future, anxiety is likely to occur.

One of the tasks I had my students do was to take a moment and truly savor something that would commonly be overlooked or devalued. Their choices ranged from preparing a meal and eating, to walking from one class to another on campus and enjoying the people and scenery around them, to making their bed and cleaning up their room. It was interesting to see how much more thought and appreciation they had for these everyday tasks.

7) Meditate – Taking some quiet time each day to clear our thoughts and relax our body can not only reduce stress, but induce feelings of calm and contentment.

8) Prioritizing our close relationships – Building close relations with others is one of the most rewarding and powerful things we can do with our time. Humans have a strong need to belong and find acceptance from those around them, and in doing so, can find much joy in these relations. However, not all relationships are created equal. Connecting with those who build us up, not bring us down, is the key to generating positive outcomes.

9) Sleep – When we don’t get enough sleep, particularly over long periods of time, our mood can take a substantial hit and we live in a very fatigued state of mind. Our bodies not only need sleep for physical reasons, but for mental and emotional reasons as well. Try going a week with only a few hours of sleep a night and then ask those around you how fun you are to be around. 🙂

10) Using our character strengths – Whether at work, in school, at home, or while engaged in a hobby, when we start integrating our strengths in new and novel ways, it can lead to greater success and more pleasing outcomes.

11) Be happy – Sounds cliché, but the more we make an effort to act happy, smile, and be more optimistic, the more that going through the motions can lead to positive emotions. Plus, happiness can be contagious. Your smile might cause someone else to smile, and so on. Likewise, when we are having a bad day, sometimes just one positive interaction can lift a spirit.

Each week during the term, I had my students complete one of these tasks that coincided with the topics and material that was presented during the week. I was amazed by the subtle changes I saw in my students and the connections that were made within a classroom of 25. People opened up, showed support for one another, and it seemingly made the learning environment more natural and comfortable for all. Even those who had been quiet and indifferent in other classes of mine were able to open up and break out of their shell.

Although I have been unable to teach this course on campus given my new position with the Ecampus program, I still enjoy sharing my knowledge and trying to live in a way that represents many of these ideals. The 100 Happy Days project reminded me of yet another way in which we can take control of our emotions and live in a way that acknowledges and appreciates the good that we have in our lives.
Who wouldn’t want to be happy?

If you took the strengths test, what were your top three strengths? Which of these techniques do you use or could you use more to increase happiness? Do you do anything that isn’t mentioned here? What are your secrets to happiness?

Comments

Very interesting! I love reading about psychology and human behavior, so cool what you do for a living. I’m kind of jealous in fact!

To keep me happy I need sleep, swim-bike-run, and some social time with husband and with some friends. Nothing too crazy.Courtney @The TriGirl Chronicles recently posted…To Infinity And Be- Wait, No, Wrong Movie!

Interesting with your class! I think the science behind this is fascinating. I might have to watch that documentary. I’ll definitely take the quiz too, but maybe later this weekend — at the moment it’s almost time for bed, and I can’t take up too much of my sleeping time! 🙂 I really like the idea behind that 100 days happiness project. I’m not always on top of a photo a day though, seems kind of similar to a gratitude journal.Kristen L recently posted…Crazy

I know how busy you are with the move and how little sleep you are probably getting. When you get a chance to settle, you should definitely check out the quiz. I agree with you about the photo – it will be interesting to see if I can follow through with 100 days!

Can I take your class?! Sounds fascinating! I know a bit about the science behind happiness and gratitude, but I’d love to learn more. I am so excited you’re doing the #100happydays challenge, too! I’m an eternally optimistic and normally super upbeat person, but lately I’ve just been dooooown. Maybe it’s this endless winter or my lack of sleep, but my mood needs to turn around asap, so I thought this would be perfect 🙂 Taking the character strengths quiz this weekend and am finally going to watch Happy (it’s been in the queue forever!). Have a wonderful weekend, dear! 🙂erin recently posted…on getting better.

I wish I could still teach the course online! 🙁 It was a favorite. The weather and loooong winter can definitely affect mood. Explains why I get so absurdly happy when we get a 55* sunny day! I am SO ready for summer. Trying to stay positive until then. You totally seem like an optimist – love your attitude toward life.

This is really interesting. I don’t think there is a downside to being happy. My mom is one of the happiest people I know. She always has a smile on her face! I think there is something to be happy about every day. For one, just being alive! It takes those little moments to just think about it to make you happy and kind of turn your day around!Heather @fitncookies recently posted…Our Final Day in New York City

My mom is also like that. The research shows that we actually do get happier as we age, because we start looking at life differently and become more focused on bettering others. I agree that there IS something to be grateful and happy about each and every day.

this is a great post with a lot of fascinating material. i haven’t heard of positive psychology but definitely ascribe to the principles for creating happiness in our lives. as a current relational psych (marriage and family therapy) major in grad school, this gives me a lot of good insights. thanks!

Shawna, I love hearing from others who are studying psychology. Marriage and family therapy is such an important field, especially in the times that we live in with a 1 out of 2 divorce rate. I think that all couples, even those that are happy in their relationships, should go to therapy every once in a while. As I tell my students, it can act like a vitamin and boost the relationship.

Such a fascinating post! I’m doing the 100 Happy Days project and have been for the last month now. I’ve found that I’m smiling more and taking pleasure in the “little things in life”. It’s almost like stopping to smell the roses. I’m going to take the strengths test, thank you for sharing that! For a while I was doing what I called a List of Positives – at the end of every day I’d write down a few positive things that happened that day. It could be anything, from something a simple as catching all the green lights on my way into work to being paid a compliment etc. I found it really helped me be a bit more grateful for things.Phaedra @ Blisters and Black Toenails recently posted…Thinking Out Loud #8

I would love to hear how your month of 100 Happy Days has been going. Are your photos all random or do you see a theme when looking at what makes you happy? I can’t wait to look back at mine and see if there are any themes. I like the idea of list of positives – very similar to the gratitude list.

I loved reading this!! I’m all about positive psychology! I actually majored in psychology back in the day 🙂 It’s a very fascinating topic, the idea that our minds can really work a number on our lives! LIke you said, if you act happy, you’ll be happy. Powerful things happen when you are optimistic about life! Think about Michael J Fox!Sarah @ Sweet Miles recently posted…Sprigs Banjees Review & Giveaway

You did? I had no idea! Psychology is a fascinating field and so relevant to everything we do. Michael J. Fox is an excellent example of overcoming adversity and staying optimistic and happy. It’s interesting how even people who win the lottery or suffer a terrible disability from an accident eventually find their way back to their baseline level of happiness that they were at before.

Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge!! I am DEFINITELY going to watch “Happy”…you are the second person who has recommended this. Is your class offered online? I would LOVE to take it!! I took the test you recommended. My top 3 strengths are…1) Hope, optimism and future-mindedness, 2) Judgement, critical thinking and open-mindedness and 3) Honesty, authenticity and genuineness. I didn’t know anything about the 100 days of happiness challenge, but it is something I should definitely do!! I do keep a gratitude journal…every evening I write down what I am thankful for and one of those things must be taking a negative aspect from the day and finding something positive about it. It helps me change my perspective 🙂Kecia recently posted…Shedding Layers

I wish I could teach this particular course online. I teach a relationships and motivation course online, but not this one. Probably one of the reasons why I integrate these topics into my blog. 🙂 So glad to hear you took the test. It is interesting that all three of your tops strengths fall under different virtues (hope = transcendence, judgement = wisdom and knowledge, and honesty = courage), meaning that you are very well rounded in these different areas. I’d be curious how you use these strengths throughout your day.

Being a teacher of 8th grade students, I feel that I use all of these strengths on any given day. I can definitely see where/how I incorporate them into my training and racing as an athlete as well. Thanks for sharing and if this course is ever available online, I would LOVE to know and take it 🙂Kecia recently posted…LIEBSTER AWARD – Sharing the Blog Love

Even though 8th graders might not take interest in these types of questionnaires, it would sure be neat for them to discover their strengths and capitalize on them as they venture through their adolescent years. I’ve always been curious about how teenagers would respond.

I thought it was a great idea too. It’s also interesting to see what makes people happy, because everyone is different in that regard. Another interesting notion about happiness is that for every negative thought or thing that happens, we need three positive thoughts or things to counteract it. Our brains are programed to quickly notice the negative for survival and defense purposes, thus it is actually easier to focus on the negative. Thank goodness we can control what we think about, to an extent!

I definitely need to watch the movie. I am generally in a good mood and happy. But I hate my job and my boss. I rarely have a good day at work and I need to get a new job. I try to be positive and upbeat but it usually doesn’t work when I am at work!! 🙁 I think that it helps that I train a lot because that can usually change my mood real quick! 🙂

Oh, no! I am so sorry to hear you are unhappy with your job and boss. Work is such a big part of our lives and it’s hard to be unhappy in a place where you invest so much time and energy, I’m glad you have training to help balance you out, but I really think you deserve better than that for yourself. I hope you are able to find a new job soon – and one that is fulfilling.

I’ve been very tempted to try the 100 happy days thingy ever since watching Happy. I definitely think that I’ve become happier the older I’ve gotten but I also think that I’ve begun to realise over the last few years that happiness isn’t something you can “get” with a job or a house or an achievement it’s something you become by enjoying all of the little things that you have in life. I think for me I became a lot hoppier when I stopped caring about what other people had/did/wanted etc.

Your class sounds really interesting and thanks for sharing the quiz, I have in open in a separate tab now!Martina @ snapshotsandwhatnots recently posted…From home to home

I hope you learn something new and interesting about yourself, Martina. And I agree with you that once we stop putting so much emphasis on what others think about us or want, and drop the comparisons, it allows us to feel happier.

I love this idea! I personally, am working on being positive every day, including being positive about my body image and self worth. I think that if I am happy about myself in my own skin, that this will radiate to others. I am generally a happy person who loves to smile, but like everyone, I get down on myself! I would love to try this challenge!Kristin @SweatCourage recently posted…I hate rest day.

I can relate, Kristin. Being comfortable in my body and confident in myself are probably two of the areas that I need to work on the most. I definitely have good days and bad, but recently have been striving to focus on the good. I hope you join the challenge!

We ARE on the same page! I loved reading your post. I had never seen that Sam Berns TedTalk – very inspirational! I am on day nine of #100happydays and have already noticed small changes in my thinking and appreciation. Glad you joined the challenge! 🙂

Another method of self-healing is to handle a positive mindset in the direction of life. Many people are susceptible to pessimistic thinking, which is the reason they fail to realize the possibility of a solution to the problem. Handling a constructive and favorable mindset will offer an individual the strength to deal with the troubles of life and look for a solution to the same.
Mrs. Betters

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Hi, I’m Kristen. Thank you for stopping by. Follow me along my journey of becoming a faster runner, endurance triathlete, and world traveler. I’ll also mix in a few random musings, open up about life, and share my adventures around my hometown of Bend, Oregon.

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