Do not worry, I am not too cocky or overconfident. She lives very close. the reason we want custody, is because she(the ex wife) has tried to keep the kids( a 9 year old girl also)away from my wife and myself.

my son is tired of the way she makes them live in her house. she will not let them be here except on my weekends or when it is good for her to have them here.we know it will be a fight, but without custody, we are at her whim, and she will not compromise at all. my son is tired of the life she gives him. I wish there was a win -win situation….. but there’s not.

I would love to have my daughter also, but she is not old enough to ask the court to come here. any more ideas?

Why are we ‘close minded people’ for pointing out the fact that you are going to take child from his father to live with another man you have made a child with. Ask the man you are to marry if he would like to be taken away from the child he has made with you. If, ‘creating a stable and loving environment for them,’ is your only goal, and to ‘do what is my eyes best for him,’ are that important then why move away from his dad. You also state in this message that you have another 3 year old that is from yet another father, so do you not see a trend here, that you are not only taking one child from a father but two?

I just hope after all of this procreating you have done that you sit down and really think about what is in the interest of the children and stop having kids.

You don’t say how far your wife lives from you. If she is relatively nearby, why go thru the expense and trauma of a custody hearing if your wife will let you be more involved in your son’s life. He doesn’t need a custody battle – he just wants to be with you more.

You say the home inspection will render this a no contest. Guess again.

This forum and the newspapers are full of reports of children living in absolute filth and still being returned to the parents. Your son needs to be able to articulate, in a manner appropriate to a 12 yo, why he feels it is better for him to be with the father than with the mother. You can’t coach him – the judge has seen it all – it has to come from the kids heart.

And remember, mom isn’t likely to give her son up without a fight. If she promises to improve living conditions, the judge may rule against you.

There are no certainties in life but death and taxes. Have you considered an alternative win-win solution for all concerned? I don’t mean to burst your bubble but don’t get too cocky.