I’m sorry but Sarah Palin is H-O-T even clad in a simple grey T-shirt and cargo pants. And, who is that stalking her, ever so close behind? Oh, it’s Greta Van Sustran lurking behind as Sarah smiles at the cholera patient in the Bermuda shorts, reclining in a nice little tent hospital.

Isn’t Greta a lesbian? My instincts say that “yes, Great VanSustran is a lesbian.” However, my instincts . . . perhaps I should go to a reliable media source. “Greta Van Sustran is not a lesbian according to her long time spouse John P. Coale. Thanks ChaCha.”

Anyway, if she were a lesbian and she were stuck with Sarah Palin in some hot, sticky country like Haiti and if she had never had breasts implants (see prior story on celesbian killer boobs), Greta might want to consider putting her best lines on Sarah. “Sarah, what did you think of Meghan McCain’s book ‘Dirty Sexy Politics'”? What about her boobs, do you think they are intimidating or cute, perky and non-threatening”? “I know that you can see Russia from your window, but you could see the stars from my bed.” “Sarah, here in Haiti, you remind me of one of those ladies in the Van Halen videos. Why don’t you who take off your glasses, shake out your hair . . . and I just happen to have brought a pair of high heels and a bikini. Sarah, I’m talkin’ bout some major DRILLING in Alaska. Do you follow?”

Oh, well – first Oprah’s not a lesbian and now Cha Cha says that Greta’s husband claims that Greta is not a lesbian . . .

Guess I’ll have to save my best lesbo mo-jo Sarah Palin pickup lines to use myself . . . next time I’m stuck in Haiti with Sarah Palin.

The McCain / Palin campaign is now on the 3rd version of Palin’s visit to “Iraq.” Yesterday, the McCain campaign released a second official version of Palin’s ONLY trip outside of North America. The second version claimed that Sarah Palin’s visit to Iraq in 2007 consisted of a brief stop at a border crossing between Iraq and Kuwait.

Strangely enough, the singer Pink seems to have predicted this one. Note in the story below that Pink wants Palin to point out Iraq on a map . . . and looks like Palin might have a hard time doing that since she and the McCain campaign can’t figure out if Plain was there or . . . maybe not.

Sarah Palin at Ft Wainwright, Alaska

When she was first selected as McCain’s VP running mate, it was claimed that Palin has traveled to Ireland, Germany, Kuwait, and Iraq to meet with members of the Alaska National Guard. They also specifically claimed that during the trip, Plain visited a “military outpost” inside Iraq.

The McCain campaign has continued to the claim that Palin was in an Iraq battle zone . . .

until the third version was released just today . . .

SARAH PALIN WAS NEVER IN IRAQ. She never ventured beyond Kuwait border.

The sick joke continues.

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