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Monday, April 09, 2012

Revisiting the gap between intention, action and the results in relationships

"Action is based on Intention." Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), Hadith An-Nawawi, Number 1

Herein questions are many, including:
One Wants To Say ‘Love’ When in actually Means ‘Sex’? Or
One simply means to say I have a friend who is not a friend-indeed!!!
Is feminism, in the West (e.g., the US), same-as, feminism in the east (e.g., India)?
Socio-psychologically speaking, is dating considered the same, in the East (India for instance) as against the West (America for instance)?

In short, is it all about intentions, actions and the resultants? Are these role models imported, more so, from Bollywood (a.k.a. West) and Hollywood (a.k.a. East), just to compare and see the meeting or diverting trends!!! Or is it an extended social nexus, which is more cultural, spiritual and historical? What do you say???

I cannot think of another area of our lives in which there is so great a gap between what we do and what our culture says we do. But may be things are beginning to change. Younger people, having grown up with the gay-rights movement and in many cases gone to colleges with co-ed dormitories, are open to a wider range of emotional possibility.

Friendship between the sexes may no longer be a political issue, but it is an issue of liberation: the freedom to love whom you want, in the way that you want. Maybe it’s time that we all took it out of the closet. Continue reading

Love and sex in India: Why some Indian men can't take a hint, Courting or harassment: What happens when Western women mix with the locals? by Hanna Ingber, GlobalPost

Australian journalist Virginia Moncrieff, who has worked across Asia, Africa and the Middle East, remembers being in India and having a long chat with a university student. She gave him her phone number, and he proceeded to call and text countless times a day.

“I still can't figure out why, when I was so obviously displeased and bothered by the endless, endless calls that my new ‘friend’ just could not, and would not, stop contacting me,” she wrote in an email.

According to cross-culture and gender specialists, this behavior in "new India" is a result of shifting social norms, a low level of interaction between opposite sexes, influences of pop culture and differing interpretations of power dynamics between men and women.

As Mumbai changes and modernizes, there is confusion over what type of behavior is acceptable in personal as well as work environments, says Jerry Pinto, author of "Surviving Women," a manual of gender politics in India. Continue reading

Real life couples don't sizzle onscreen ...
In more than a few instances in the past, Bollywood stars who have become increasingly public about their love life have disheartened viewers (and directors) with their lack of comfort and uneasiness when it comes to portraying love scenes onscreen...

Though Hindi films are no longer shy of intimacy, many Bollywood actors, especially those who are real-life couples, continue to look uncomfortable with such scenes. continue reading