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Androgynous Names

We love the name Quinn for our little girl. For a middle name, we both agree that we love Adair, an old surname in our genealogy. We are concerned, however, that Quinn Adair is too androgynous and not feminine enough. Should we go with something like Adele or Eloise in the middle instead? Does Quinn Adair sound like a boy?

–Have a Q about QA

It's not clear from your question if you will be using the two names together as a first name (like Mary Rose or Anna Lee). If not, then the practical issue of sounding "too androgynous" really only matters if someone is looking at a document which lists your child's full name, but not her sex. In that case they might use the middle name to try to figure out whether the person is male or female.

Olympic swimmer and multiple medalist Amanda Beard welcomed her second child with husband Sacha Brown last week. Already parents to a threeyear old son, Blaise, the couple now have a new daughter. The model mom posted the news on her official website that "Doone Isla Brown was born happy and healthy June 19th at 3:34 p.m."

Congratulations are in order for baseball’s Nick Swisher and actress wife Joanna Garcia Swisher who welcomed a daughter last week. The couple shared their news with US Weekly . The new baby, Emerson Jay Swisher, will go by nickname Emme.

Oscar Nunez, who plays Oscar Martinez on NBC’s The Office confirmed to USWeekly that he and his wife, actress Ursula Whittaker had a daughter earlier this month, August Luce Nunez. Baby August is the first child for both parents.

Inspired by Taylor Swift's new song "We Are Never, Ever Getting Back Together" in the background and her adventures with her latest paramour, young Conor Kennedy, a son of Robert F. Kennedy, Jr, a name came to mind. And not the one you think.

The name was leaked, it turns out correctly, over a month ago by In Touch and seemed plausible given that Maxwell is both unusual, since it's traditionally a boys name, and meaningful -- Maxwell is Eric's middle name.

Lately, we’ve been talking a lot about girls with boys' names. It’s hardly a revolutionary practice, but it’s the creativity that makes the most current examples noteworthy. These days, Maxwell is pretty much as masculine as a name can be, but that didn’t stop Lindsay Sloan from picking it for her daughter. Soon after, Marla Sokoloff named her new baby girl Elliotte (feminine in spelling but not so much in usage).

The general consensus seems to be that it’s cool and modern – or at least, acceptable -- for a girl to have boy name or a boyish nickname, but it’s unfortunate for a boy to be “stuck” with a name that is associated mainly with girls. After all, it’s nearly impossible to think of a name that made a transition from feminine associations to masculine ones. Generally, once a name gets too girly, it doesn't come back.

Names like Taylor, Peyton, and Morgan are in the middle of a gender shift, but still fairly androgynous. It depends entirely on your personal experience with the name. Other historically masculine names like Ashley, Courtney, or Shannon are rarely used for boys anymore. But why not? Trends change, of course, but is it really necessary to write off these names from boys just because they’re also used for girls?

Lindsay Sloane is the latest celebrity parent to embrace what has been thought of as a "boy name" for her new daughter.

The actress — who is best known for her roles in TV's Sabrina, the Teenage Witch and Weeds as well as movies including Bring It On and Horrible Bosses — welcomed her first child with her husband, talent agent Dar Rollins, on Jan. 19. Maxwell Lue Rollins is the new addition who the couple call their “sweet little girl.”

But that’s not the end of the proud papa’s part in this story. Ron and Cheryl Howard famously took an unusual route in naming their four children -- one that, for the kids, is more than a little squirm-inducing.

We're expecting a girl and are considering giving her the middle name Bennett, which is my grandfather's middle name, which in turn was his mother's maiden name. I want to honor the name by passing it down - especially because my grandfather's health is failing, and I think he would be proud to see the tradition continue.

I know the latest fad for many parents is to name daughters with traditionally male names, or surnames, or family names. But I'm from a pretty traditional family and in a pretty traditional area. I worry that using Bennett for our daughter's middle name will simply raise a lot of eyebrows and that the poor girl will only be embarrassed for years to come when she has to tell her friends what her middle name is.

So my question is this: in spite of all the chatter about how popular it is to name girls with boys' names, how common is it really? Am I being swayed by reading too many blogs and books about baby names, and being blinded to the reality that... well, doing this to a daughter is still simply selfish?

- Seeking Confirmation

Dear Seeking,

You're asking about one naming divide, male vs. female. But you're looking past another divide, first vs. middle. And in your case, that makes all the difference.

First though, the question you asked. Yes, the chatter is true: many parents today are choosing traditionally male names for their daughters. Any boy's name with a shred of connection to the feminine can be a target for crossover. A vowel sound ending, like Micah or Emory, does the trick. Same for a name root that can yield a girlish nickname, like Emerson called Emmy, or Elliot called Ellie.

But Bennett doesn't fill the bill so easily. Bennett has a classically masculine sound and it crops to Ben, a name that remains squarely in the boys' column.