Monday, March 26, 2007

WEIGHT (mis)MANAGEMENT

I've always been on the chubby side all my life. Masa kecik, it was baby fat, comel ah gitu. In my early teens, I was 'badan sedap-sedap' which simply means I wasn't skinny. Masuk sekolah menengah, I already had the right curves, which only made me more introvert because the boys used to stare and tease me especially when I tried to play sports. In my early 20s I became 'montok'. But now in my 30s... now... urrghhhhhh....!!!!!

Anyone who's never had to struggle so much with weight issues, probably can't fully understand how hurtful remarks about being overweight can be. Look, who ever wakes up in the morning and say "today I wanna get fat"? On the other hand, a thin person may feel hurt if you call him 'scrawny' or 'telephone pole'. It comes down to the fact that nobody likes to be criticized for a situation that is not really within his control to change immediately.

Actually, I've never been too disturbed about it because I've come to accept that I'll never be thin. This is good for my mental health :-) Unfortunately, lately I've been too careless and care-free, that I've put on quite quite a lot of weight. Sure I can blame it on comfort-eating to beat depression during the early days of the D. But it's been some time now, I think that excuse is not plausible anymore hehehe :-)

Anyway, my sudden concern is more towards health rather than looks. It seems that for the past one year, my blood pressure has been steadily increasing and never gone down since. Oh, I drop by my GP's clinic every month just to monitor my BP. The good doctor has warned me that if the situation persists for the next 3 months, he'll put me on medication. Ya ampunn.... nggak mau!

So now I have made a resolution to try to lose weight by eating a better diet and start exercising. I have to start with something mild like walking first, because I don't think my knees can take me jogging just yet :-P It's getting quite expensive buying new clothes, as the old ones don't fit me anymore!