LETTER: The Acting President?

February 26, 2013

The relationship between the concept of dignity and our political class has become increasingly awkward of late, but the divorce was just about finalized Sunday night with Michelle Obama's surprise appearance on the Academy Awards show. The American people deserve closure, so let's not stop now.

I propose that we broadcast next year's Oscars live from the White House, hosted by none other than Barack and Michelle themselves. Michelle could wow the audience by debuting a new hairdo and performing an emotional rendition of Sally Fields' unforgettable "You like me, you really like me!" speech. Barack could come out in a top hat and carrying a golf club to deliver a monologue in a moving homage to the beloved Bob Hope.

Perhaps we could even convince Joe "I've got a million of 'em Biden to do some slapstsick in a hilarious tribute to Danny Kaye. Lifetime Achievement Awards will be delivered directly from Oslo and presented to the grateful but humble first couple at the conclusion of the broadcast. It will indeed be a night to remember.