These recommendations are for the weekend: Friday April 5, 2013 thru Sunday April 7, 2013.

As an often antisocial, television loving, Internet exploring, self-excluding individual, I feel the art of being a homebody is an area of my expertise. So, by the powers vested in me, I’d like to officially guide any individuals choosing to remain home this weekend as best as I can. Stock up on two days worth of snacks and drinks, grab your sweatpants, check your Wi-Fi and follow my lead. Let’s form a society or something. We’ll call it HA – Homebody Association. Acronyms are cool, good for us.

Netflix Recommendations (Movie & Television Show)

MOVIE:Evil Dead, being that the remake comes out this weekend, it’s only right that we check out the original. The new version doesn’t look that frightening to me – some girl creepily singing “We’re gonna get you!” doesn’t scare me like, say post Taco Bell bathroom sessions or large spiders.

Also it’s worth noting that if you hate scary movies like me, the classic version on Netflx is from the early 80s, and its special effects and suspense aren’t as capable of inducing long lasting fear. Trust me, I’m as paranoid as they come and it didn’t really affect me. Matter of fact, I know for certain that I saw oatmeal used as guts at one point.

TV:Charmed. I used to watch it every single morning before school and I’d like to rekindle the old flame Piper, Phoebe, Prue and I had. The thing is, I’m recommending a specific episode. It’s season 3, episode #22 and the reason it’s significant is because that’s when Prue dies. I was always annoyed that after everything they endured, she like, died from being thrown through a wall. Lame, but effective because I may or may not have had to wipe tears from my cheeks after heavily weeping on my way to the bus stop the morning I watched.

YouTube Surfing.

My suggestion is a prank in which a dude goes through the drive thru and hides himself within a cleverly crafted seat, so it appears that there’s no driver. See where this video takes you, on a magic YouTube carpet ride.

On Television.

Friday night watch Happy Endings on ABC. PLEASE, do it! It’s a brilliant show that isn’t getting the ratings it’s worthy of – probably because it doesn’t have the laugh track that Big Bang Theory fans require to know when it’s appropriate to be amused.

Music.

This weekend’s music suggestion is to listen to D W N T W N. I dig their music, it reminds me of M83, but at the same time I don’t want to compare because they have their own unique, sound that you probably haven’t heard, but it’s worthy of a listen.

What’s on the menu?!

Buy jars of queso. Whether you select different brands or flavors, just make sure you get three jars and only ONE bag of tortilla chips. The reason being, you won’t be shy when scooping. When it’s even, you have to ration out queso so you don’t run out of it with half a bag of chips. But this? This is like a free for all. Dig in homies, and don’t be bashful.

Website Suggestion.

5 Random Activities To Try If You’re Not Too Lazy

1. Move furniture around – it always livens things up, especially when you spend a significant amount of time in the same place. It is, however, a lot of physical labor which is why you’ll probably pass.2. Go on ebay and bid on something random that you wouldn’t mind owning – or losing a bidding war for. I’m thinking I’ll see if I can find a toy crossbow, because I’m a big fan of Daryl Dixon played by Norman Reedus on The Walking Dead.3. Sign up for a free trial of something – see how it turns out, just don’t forget to cancel. I’m thinking I might try Hulu Plus – as if I don’t already have enough ways to access TV shows.4. Attempt lucid dreaming. If it works for you, please let me know, I’m intrigued by it but I’m too lazy to attempt. Ironic, too lazy to attempt a form of sleeping. Maybe this’ll be the weekend I give it a shot, I want to do things I’ll never do in real life – fly, jump high enough to dunk, have good credit, etc.5. Give the bathroom a detailed cleaning. Scrub the tub, the toilets… Actually who am I kidding, that one isn’t going to happen. Let’s take it slow. If your toilet paper roll is on the counter, put it on the holder – baby steps, y’all.

This is for the women who are first to get naked, howl at the moon and jump into the sea. This is for the women who seek relentless joy; the ones who know how to laugh with their whole souls. The women who speak to strangers because they have no fear in their hearts. This is for the women who drink coffee at midnight and wine in the morning, and dare you to question it. This is for the women who throw down what they love, and don’t waste time following society’s pressures to exist behind a white picket fence. The women who create wildly, unbalanced, ferociously and in a blur at times. This — is for you.

“When Janne has a new poem written, I shut my life down to do nothing but read it, and then when I turn my life back on, everything is better.” — James Altucher

[…] 5. This accurately describes my weekend. Also, this is the FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. That’s a little dramatic, but it is ridiculously hilarious. As in, I sat here on my couch and laughed to myself for a few minutes (aka an hour). […]

https://thoughtcatalog.com/2013/9-reasons-you-dont-want-a-relationship-right-now/ 9 Reasons You Don’t Want A Relationship Right Now | Thought Catalog

[…] to watch and unless the pizza delivery guy or girl plans on asking you out, it’s going to be #PajamasOverPeople until further […]