[ open on sign: “Karaoke Tonight” ]
[ dissolve to Timone singing Bryan Adams’ “Everything I Do (I Do It For You)” onstage ]

Timone: That was for you, Anna Nicole Smith — we miss you, baby! [ he pounds his chest ]
[ Peter Popps, the emcee, steps up on stage ]

Peter Pops: Let’s give it up for Timone! so much emotion in that young man every single week! Alright — if you’ve just arrived, I’m your host, Peter Pops. Welcome to Karaoke — and I hope you can carry… a tune. Okie?

Voice: You used that joke last week!

Peter Pops: [ he chuckles ] It’s Random Draw Night, which means it’s not first-come, first-sing. So, next up — and I hope that you are ready — [ he reaches into the fishbowl and pulls out a slip of paper ] And… okay. There’s gum on this. Who did this?

Peter Pops: No. Alright, now listen to me: there is no band, the music is played from C… Ds.

Male A-Hole: CDs, huh? Like CDs nuts? [ he laughs smugly ]

Peter Pops: Okay. Okay. You need to give me the name of your song, or we’re gonna have to move on to somebody else.

Male A-Hole: [ turns to Female A-Hole ] You ready, babe? [ she looks at him but doesn’t respond ] Ready to do some karry-okes? [ silence as she chews with her mouth open ] You ready to roke it, babe? Get our roke on? [ she continues chewing silently ] Babe? Roke?