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Monthly Archives: June 2013

One of the most fascinating things in life is the process of gaining experience. It’s such a simple concept. We are constantly experiencing something through our senses. And no matter what we are doing we really can’t mess it up. Experiences just cannot be wrong or incorrect. We just do them.

Gaining meaningful experiences isn’t all that different. To gain meaningful experiences one has to apply a little more effort. If we are seeking meaningful experiences, we cannot become lazy and enjoy the comforts of complacency. It takes a certain amount of energy to leave the house, to learn new things, to say yes to those around us offering events, dates, or random outings.

The easiest way we can invest in ourselves is to seek out new experiences. Nobody can take it away from us. It will be very unique to us and when we parlay it with other experiences it becomes even more unique. And once we build enough experience, then imagine how this unique set of skills and beliefs can turn into something special. Something that others might pay you for.

At last when we focus our experiences like a magnifying glass on a certain subject over a long period of time, well that’s when we become professionals. Combined with other experiences a focused specialty will always be unique. Think of the lawyer turned into a Hollywood writer.

Stress comes directly from our flight or fight response mechanism deep in our brain. It’s not a bad thing because it’s there to protect us from imminent danger. The interesting part is when our brain uses the flight or fight response to situations where we are not necessarily in imminent danger.

So what can we do to control stress?

There are two ways to respond when trying to control stress. The first is to learn to embrace it. Many people enjoy the challenge and so when they feel that flight or fight response coming on they smile and think bring it on.

Second, we can dismiss it. It takes a strong will, but it’s possible. The idea is that in the modern day many of those stress inducing moments are not life threatening. There is no immediate danger to us, and so the goal is to remind ourselves of this. If work or school is overwhelming us, we can take a step away from the project and just think about life and how this isn’t our impending doom.

Stress can be healthy, but either way we can mellow out the effects. Don’t fall victim to over thinking those situations developing ulcers worrying so much. Cowering is never going to be an option so either fight the fight or learn to dismiss it.

Task lists are tedious, boring, horrible things that only annoy us when all we want to do is to enjoy life and do whatever we want. The longer the list is, the worse off we are. We draw lines and mark checks and convince ourselves we are doing great things, but deep down inside we know all this sucks and we rather be traveling or lounging beach side.

Do not worry though because there is a mental hack to overcome this dread. The key to any to-do list, or in other words, the key to any task is to ask ourselves why is it that we want to do any of these things. To what purpose does this list serve?

Obviously we have some reason want to do the things we list out, but it doesn’t help when our reasons are so buried in our brains. Therefore it is extremely helpful to write out “the why” of your tasks. Again, what is the purpose of doing these things? Here are the details.

Take your list and organize it so they are all for something larger. Usually we have task lists for projects, goals, or some ideal we want to uphold like our cleanliness or fitness. Now that your tasks are all aimed at a certain goal, again ask yourself why do you want to achieve this goal. It could be to create stability for your family, to look and feel healthier, to gain significance, etc.

Whatever your reasons are, don’t stop at just listing them. Take your vision and make them impressive and desirable. Create strong mental pictures and make them brighter and larger so that you can taste, feel, touch, all that you imagine.

Once you do this, then now your task list has some meaning. You have some fire deep in your belly and it will be your pleasure to tackle it. Each task that you complete takes you one step closer to that vision. Task list is hacked. So long tedious, boring, horrible list!

Taking time to think about life and all its glory is essential to our mental health, but don’t do it when you are hungry or cold. It seems obvious, but sometimes we can bare coldness or hunger for long periods of time and during this time most likely our eyebrows are furrowed and we look pained. If we can imagine any decision made at this point will not be a positive one.

Research today suggests that most of our decisions about life are made in the deepest recesses of our brain. Our consciousness does not reside here nor does our faculty for language. If you can imagine then, decisions are processed in a murky, dark place where our consciousness has very little impact. When we do eventually come to think about this decision in our conscious mind, we are merely justifying the choice we have already made.

It is in this deeper area of our brain where our basest emotions originate; emotions, such as love, fear, hunger, and lust. Now imagine when we are cold or hungry. Our brain knows we are uncomfortable and that something needs to be done. Unpleasant feelings are stirred deep down in our brain to get us off our butt.

Sometimes our consciousness can become preoccupied, and most of the time it’s during some sort of introspection. If this is the case then our rational mind will take these feelings and intertwine it with our conscious introspection. Our internal dialogue will unfortunately revolve around our unpleasant feelings laying blame everywhere! It can’t be pleasant.

“Why am I feeling like crap? I really hate work /school / life! I have to do something about it!”

Sometimes you just need to eat or put on a sweater on and you will feel better, and work / school / life will not feel so bad. It sounds silly, but it is guaranteed that someone out there has fallen prey to this before. So remember, eat or stay warm during introspection or we will incorrectly correlate our frustrations with some aspect of our life and then we will think it true.

Actions define who we are. Think about the smallest unit of time and think about the smallest unit that can be used to measure actions. Moment by moment, we take singular actions. In its entirety, the group of actions directed at one vision will create something larger than life.

Next, align the things we value with the actions we make, take, or choose. To be true to ourselves and consistent in our actions. In other words, “walking the talk.”

Now think about these momentary sets of actions and how they define who we are. Now imagine becoming selfless in all our actions and doing things innocently or for others over the long run.

Here are the small momentary selfless actions, that when focused over a long period of time, will lead to great things.

Introspection

Selfless thoughts will lead you to success.

Your day-by-day introspection should come in peaceful walks, little distractions, during prayer or meditation. Practice aligning your hopes, dreams and value with your actions. Place yourself outside the center of the universe. Don’t be pushy and over exert it.

If you are hard on yourself or over exert then you are of the mindset that you have 100% control. Believing that you have 100% control will set you up for emotional pain and douchebagery. The goal is to let go of this feeling.

Have faith and certainty because…

If you are doing it right then you will find peace in all the chatter. You will notice that success will not get to your head. Failures will not be debilitating. Others’ opinions will have little effect on you. You will find an ease of mind that can be a generally state of happiness everyone seeks.

Relations

Selfless listening will lead to success.

Your day-by-day example is to truly listen with intent. Hear beyond words: listen to emotion and actions. Listen to understand and leave it there. Don’t be pushy and over exert it.

If you are pushy and over exert, people will wall up. It is selfish to push your knowledge and experiences on others when they are not ready or if they have simply not asked.

Have faith and certainty because…

If you are doing it right, you will know when the time comes provide assistance for the things you discovered.

Fitness

Selfless consumption equals success.

Your day-by-day is to be conscious of what you put in your body. Find 3-5 hours a week to exert some energy by either lifting something heavy or moving around quickly. Don’t be pushy and over exert it.

If you are pushy and over exert then you will exhaust your will, your muscles, or other aspects of your life. You will never feel happy with how your body looks.

Have faith and certainty because…

If you are doing it right your body and you energy levels will change. You will feel exponentially better about yourself.

Business

Selfless creation equals success.

Your day-by-day: Learn something new; learn unique combinations of things. Tell other people about the things you know. Find ways to be better at learning or creating or combining or nurturing some hobby. Don’t be pushy and over exert it.

If you are pushy and over exert than you become the sleazy used car salesmen.

Have faith and certainty because…

If you are doing it right. People will be naturally interested in what you have to offer. They will pay you for your tools or services. In other words creating value for others until they are happy to pay you =)

BetterMe has been inching up the “Top New Free” apps list under the category productivity. We are currently at number 66. We have moved up 60 spots since the last update! Thanks for your support. Keep telling everyone about it!

BetterMe started off as an alarm clock and now it’s turned into a productivity app using public humiliation as a motivator to get us places on time and to help achieve our goals.

So you may be wondering what next. First we would like to expand our social media options. We will be integrating Twitter and Google+. Along with this, we would like to allow the user to create a group based on their contact list, and then to use SMS to alert those contacts in the group.

We have been thinking about the use of public humiliation as a means for motivation and we feel that we are missing the exact opposite which could be considered to be a bit more effective. We want to create automatic messages for successful outcomes. That’s right; we want to use positive reinforcement too. I message posted to cheer you on after consecutive achievements in goals, non-snoozes, or appointments.

When we have the tools to track usage per user, this will also mean we can provide graphical reports too. We feel productivity junkies are obsessed with metrics and so wouldn’t it be great to track wake up times, successive days gone without being late, goals met versus missed? We think so.

Some new features we have in mind include habit building with daily, weekly, monthly, yearly reminders. We also want to help users create mission statements. This can be done by parsing roles, and asking the user “how” and “what” they will do to achieve their ideal vision for each role.

We have all heard these sayings in our youth “Never say never”, “No such thing as can’t”, or “There is nothing you cannot achieve as long as you put your mind to it,” and we understood their meanings just fine. Yet we were we riddled with limiting beliefs. The notion that we can’t have certain things, that we don’t deserve certain things; that we are not beautiful enough, smart enough, tall enough, strong enough, etc.

We are told we have right or left brains, and we buy into this. We are told that people are born with genius or natural talent. We believe certain people are lucky. They have had certain advantages that we never had.

Are these not the excuses for those who do not want to work for what they want?

How much of our lives can we control? Can we control the things that annoy us or frustrate us? Can we break bad habits and learn new ones? If we are slobs can we turn into highly organized people? If we are night owls can we switch our lifestyle to become a morning person?

The answer is yes, and the only way you will know this is to prove it to yourself. The next question is how bad do you want it? If you ask us there are unlimited creative solutions to any problem. Have you overcome a limiting belief?