Saturday, my Spanish teacher and I decided to take a break from the gay district of Torremolinos and instead attend a birthday party of a gay couple in Fuengirola. It was J. and G.´s birthday party. They have been living together for years now and was officially married a year ago or so. Although they are still very much in love with each other, they like to sleep and play with other men together, or separately. Yes, they have a healthy OPEN relationship.

Antonio finds an open relationship atrocious. He says he is, and always be monogamous and expects his partner to be such as well. For me, I am definitely in support of this more liberal accord but of course, with strong grounds and limitations. Rule 1: we have been partners (or married) for more than 3 years ( Psychologists say that love lasts for 3 years. After that, it goes to another level..companionship, friendship etc. Don't ask me for any proof coz I just read it somewhere) and Rule number 2: we do it separately and we don´t need to know. It sounds tricky, I know it is. In a relationship dictated by norms of the society, we are bound to stay faithful with one another, to be honest and to be a property (to an extent) of each one. However, with the advent of modern media and constant changing society, these traditional values are slowly changing. Not disappearing but evolving into a different stratosphere.

More and more people are experimenting different ways to fulfill their desires and needs. To some, it may sound like a complete perversion but for others, it´s an important way of liberating themselves from hidden fervor which only they would know how to satisfy. You may frown with the idea of cyber-relationship (and sex), threesomes, leather, etc. but to those who practice these, it is what their minds and bodies are longing...wanting...hence, they can do nothing but be obliged to do so.

Man's obsession to find perfection is infinite. We always try to find the absolute and defect-less of everything---things, people, relationship---and because of this obsession, most of the time, we only see flaws and defects which we hope we could get in another form, shape or size. A lot of times we say ¨oh, I wish my boyfriend/ girlfriend is like this...or like that¨and at the end of the day, we could only dream. However, there are those who are brave enough to go out of their way to achieve such desires without hurting somebody else´s feelings. Mutual consent is the key factor. One should only do if the other has no problem with it.

It is not the first the time that I have met a gay couple in an open relationship. In the very Catholic country where I came from, it is not unusual. Here in Spain, popular culture is more liberal with these kinds of liaisons. In the comedy film, "Al OtroLadode la Cama" (The Other Side of the Bed) and it´s sequel, Los 2 Ladosde la Cama (Two Sides of the Bed), the characters discover their newfound joy of swapping partners.Ignorant of what´s going on in the first place, they took it as treason between friends. In the end, they all came in terms of the situation and eventually made an effort to be together not as a separate couple but a different kind of relationship between four people.

Flamenco/soul singer BUIKA has been vocal about her threesome relationship in the past. She used to live in together with a man and another woman. The three of them were lovers. Today, she has her own child, and a full-fledge lesbian.

The party was indeed a blast except that their giant dog was forever sniffing crotch areas of the guests. When he turned to me , he would not let me go. He was trying to mount me all night long!

Antonio had learned from one of the guests that almost all parties held in that house ended up in orgies and we were waiting for that the whole night. :). I remember the first private party I attended in Manila. I was 20 years old back then. It was a party held by my ex-boyfriend´s friend. I knew what was happening after all the alcohol, cheese, and nuts were consumed...everyone was in the living room and everybody´s gone quiet except for some moans from undecipherable pain or pleasure. I wanted eagerly to join them but unfortunately, my boyfriend locked me in the room all alone while he was doing the dishes (looking back..I think, was he really doing the dishes?).

As the night regressed, the guests left one by one and the infamous orgy was nowhere in sight. However, I caught G. stealing some carnal touches with some guests. I knew his boyfriend saw it too but he didn't mind at all. After all, the more the merrier, isn't it?

I sensed that the people in the party were all bed buddies of the birthday celebrators.

Beyonce sings in Castellano...yes, she does! She is set to tour Spain this year and as a warming up exercise, she recently recorded ¨Irreplaceable¨ and ¨AmorGitano¨ (Gypsy love) with Mexican singer Alejandro Fernandez. She also had a duet with Shakira, which I am sure you have seen by now.

I am addicted to tonica. NOT the Schweppes type but the one you use after cleaning your face to close the pores and relax the skin. You see, years of smoking and going out until the wee hours of the mornings made my skin looked unhappy and lacklustre. Fortunately, I am Asian so I am blessed with a fine, smooth skin.

Last Saturday, I went to the SUPER perfumeria in Torremolinos to see if they get any L'Oreal for men toner since I use this brand for facial wash and moisturizer. Unfortunately, there was none and the only one I saw was a Clinique Men´s Facial Toner for more or less 20 euros . Whew! I'll save that one until I am 35 ( dermatologists say that anti-aging products take effect only for those 35 years old and up). So, I went to the women´s merry-go-round of narcissistic products and found Nivea Toner. They come in two colors Blue and Pink so obviously I opted for the blue one thinking it´s more masculine (yeah, right). They have a special offer of 5 euros and comes with a make up remover. Toner

Make Up Remover/ Cleanser

Foolish me, I didn't really read the package and when I got home, I found out it's for mature skin (PielMadura)! Huff! My mother would love it I am sure but not my smooth 28 year old Asian skin.

So today, I went back and found this better one by PONDS. It´s got Aloe Vera extract and helps closes the pores (what I really wanted in the first place).

PONDS Toner

PONDS as we all know is a trusted name in skin care. I remember using my mom´s facial cream at the age of 10, so I don´t think I will go wrong with this one.I just hope it works for men too.

I think I like this entry. I am thinking of doing a separate blog for male grooming. I think I should.

I have an Indianofficemate and I hate her. Not because she is Indian but because she talks non- stop. She is the human version of a wrecked CD played over and over again. She gets me into eating cookies and fruit juice---the perfect ingredients to death of my oh so very strict ATKINS diet. She tells me Indian philosophies and the secrets of life like---a man should not live to work but rather work to live---and other shits. I try to ignore her everyday, smile and pretend to absorb whatever she was saying though the reality is that I could'nt even understand her accent. I despised her.

But things went into a 180 degrees backflip when one day, she gave me this:

This is an authentic fur bufanda (scarf) made from butchered and dried baby FOX complete with head, toes, tails and fingernails. hahahaha. Beat that!She originally wanted my manager to have it but my manager was repulsed by the idea of having to have a dead animal hanging on her shoulders. You should have seen her face when she saw it. She was actually scared! hahahaha!. My manager said, ¨oh, just give it to Jeno, I am sure she would love it¨. And I did.

I know, it is cruelty to animals and all..but you see, the curry woman paid loads of money to have it so instead of it going to the bin, I saved it. I actually saved the world from another garbage! hahahaha.I love it really, I tell you. Too bad, the weather's not that cold anymore for this furry treasure to be seen embracing my neck on the streets, but who cares about weather anyway. I really am just waiting for the right occasion to wear this baby and voila! I´m gonna be the jungle bitch of the coast.

I gave the Indian woman ( and new found friend) a big smile and said, ¨Girl, this is better than any tandoori¨.