Nope, I didn't just fall off the turnip truck

While on the elliptical this morning, I happened to glance at the TV (The only place I catch any news, accidentally). I asked myself, “Why is the president speaking about birth control?” Why?

Doesn’t the president have more important things to do? I don’t know, maybe solving the issues that have us on the verge of bankruptcy and wars we can’t afford to create?

Now, it doesn’t matter to me in terms of the “real” why to those questions.

What matters to me is why in a country built on a declaration in 1776 of inalienable rights are we constantly invading the space of others, giving unwarranted opinions and advice, to tell “individuals” how and what they should do in their own private life. Especially when no one on the face of this planet is the paragon of perfection (whatever that is, and by the way, for me, no thank you to trying to be something that makes me miserable, insert smiley face “here”).

Where did it change that not just as a country are we in the business of everyone globally (invited or not)…but that people in this country feel entitled to the right to focus on what their neighbor is doing, when its none of their damn business (as long as they are not causing physical harm or duress to anyone else)? Is it the media who has made “news” out of items, which should remain a private, personal choice? The politicians?

The thing is, none of these questions are really what my point is of this post.

If we look to our leadership for ideas on how to engage with others, what do we see? (I’m actually not going to answer that question, because it would require an entire other post on the subject)

Instead I believe, the president (figurehead) aka government like everyone else needs to allow people their freedom. Just because you don’t agree with the lifestyle of someone else, or the religious choices of others or naturally born differences; it doesn’t give anyone and I mean anyone the right to infringe.

This isn’t about politics (and as an OPINION, both parties are the same—I don’t favor either, I actually favor Lincoln’s party of the 1860s, insert smiley face “here”).

My post is actually about happiness.

We focus on others and not our OWN self. Focus on others distracts us from our “self”. We become consumed by the actions and words of others; what they do, don’t do or say, most of the time. We become passionate about defending our stance when half the time we never looked deep enough inside to know WHY we feel the way we do. We are disconnected from our own truth. We avoid the most important person in our own life, us; meaning: you and me.

I am generalizing, because I know many people don’t fall into the pit of self-despair and ignore it, while they TRY to fix someone else or their view, so they feel better.

If you are not looking within, now would be a great time to focus on who you are,what you want for you (not anyone else), and being KIND TO YOURSELF, then world peace could prevail.

If you focus on making you authenticallyhappy, your days aren’t filled with the desire to control the behavior of others or wanting things to be different; your days are filled with being kind to yourself (which makes you a whole heck of a lot happier to be around too) as you participate in your life. Not venom spit at others. Not power through conquering others, power through self-empowerment.

As long as the focus is outside of you in terms of desiring change, then true peace and happiness will never reign, because outside factors will rule your inner sanctuary.

Leave thy neighbor alone. Let others figure their lives out or not.

No one and I mean no one changes their mind or heart by others for the better, unless its what they truly want. When you exude force it gives the false impression that someone has acquiesced, but in reality they will still think and believe what they want. They will disappoint you and that is their right.

The idea of a perfect world doesn’t exist, because EVEN if the outer world was perfect it will never make you happy.

Only you can have happiness by accepting all that is, taking action that is in alignment with happiness and not the opposite… Battles fought and won are never won for good; it is so much easier to just give up the struggle and live. And when the outside world temporarily cooperates, great! Embrace inner peace; it is not temporary. The struggle ends when you stop getting involved in the lives of others; when they don’t want or ask for you to help or to fix them or for your opinion. Whew! What a relief! I can already breathe easier with that weight lifted!

The more we give up the fight of what we can’t control, it makes self-responsibility an actual option. The individual becomes the collective and it leads to PEACE.

I’m not writing to change your personal beliefs. We all have the right to honor and value our own beliefs… So it makes sense to allow everyone else that same right.

Spending time judging others is painful. It is actually more tragic than that, because whatever bar we use to judge others is turned inward on ourselves…. the inner critic prevails and creates a constant state of battle inside.

The heart and mind will duke it out when the sense of self is so fragile it must have agreement about its beliefs or it fights, it fights for its very life. It lives in pain…and all that is inward is brought outward.

Again we all have the freedom to believe what we want; although it would be a far more peaceful world if we could dump our personal beliefs which make a person feel unhappy, disconnected, unworthy or alone.

It is why I took up coaching; I witness people taking action to counter those beliefs, which keep them stuck rolling in the mud. I watch the tension relax of holding these painful beliefs as true, which in turn allows self-acceptance, self-love and empowerment. And amazingly the more we accept ourselves, the more we accept the rest of the world.

So, it really isn’t a political discussion; it’s really about how to establish world peace, starting with each individual FOCUSING on their OWN beautiful self.

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