Friday, January 23, 2009

Dante does not show up from school, Mother picked up phone 4 hrs later to file police report, Dante shows up!

Oh what a night after I had oh what a day. Both his mother and dad went to where his dad was to pick up Dante from school, and he did not show. Dan left to go take care of some business, his mother was seized with a mighty anxiety attack as all mothers are prone to, Dan refused to be as fearful, she got mad, so I became the go between talking to them both on the phone as we wondered why in a society with every other kid with a cell phone, Dante just did not call home. It figured he might have been kidnapped, held against his will, police were called and said that in four hours a police report could be filed. Mother and Dad stopped speaking as each did not react as the other thought right. I kept saying, well, call me, if you hear anything. Finally just as his mother was picking up the phone to call the police Dante walked in the door. I told her to tell him I loved him, and to please not scare his mother and grandmother like that. His dad claimed he was not scared as he suspected that Dante being impulsive ran into something he wanted to do and did it. He said he did not want Dante to live in fear, of what punishment, as he is bound to be punished. But in the meantime, his mother and I had a good talk about how to try to keep him from becoming sexually active as she said one of his little friends had a girl pregnant at 13! This certainly alarmed me, and she said she had taken him to an Internet website to show him all the sexually transmitted diseases he could get. She felt that his father was not a good role model for him because he was encouraging him to go with girls, probably because he is dating. I told him what she said in another phone call he made to me in between in answer to one I made to him. She is staying home keeping care of two little kids with her present love, so she has Dante during school, since Dan is working. So she probably feels she has more of Dante than she needs on a night like this.I just tried to be as neutral as I could and not take sides too far one way or the other which is the duty of the mother and the former mother-in-law and grandmother of the child. Doc will probably faint when he hears this story as he already thinks my family is one of the most dysfunctional on earth. He made a date for us to go on the new fast transit to the end of the line tomorrow, so I could get away from it all. So when I tell him Dante was lost for 4 hours I don't know whether HE will be able to stand it without saying something that will make me mad so that I am no longer speaking to HIM. But Dante is a TEENAGER now. Let's see sports got discussed, why hasn't his dad got him into sports so he would not be tempted by girls at his young age. I don't know the answer, but I know that Dante is going to be a teen for quite a few years so we better get prepared for the ride.

7 comments:

Whew! Nerve-wracking isn't it. But thinking on what I did at that age, well...and you're right, time to be prepared for what's bound to happen if Dante is anything like any other teenager. Humans, what can ya do lol? Stay well Gerry.

It is hard being a parent these days. Why do you think I have been dreading the teen years and working hard to disapline and teach what's right to 'em? So they will not turn out anything like my husband and I were.

Children will make mistakes, that is part of learning and growing up (that is what we tell them) but they have to try and they have to have enough respect to let us know who, what, when and where. If my 14yr old son went missing for 4 hours and he had his cell or access to one.. there would be a big freak fesk fest going I am sure and BIG coscenses.

I hope Dante can apreshate the love his parents have for him and why he made them frantic when he didn't at least check in. That is what I would get across to him, not that it was so bad he went off with friends but that he didn't check in and tell some one where and who he was going to be with and drill it in to him how that was not aceptable and there should not be a next time.

Did you ever find out what caused Dante to be so late or is he talking? A phone call works! I hope he knows that. Connor couldn't live without texting and calling. Marina needs to talk to him, she texts now and he will text right back. Is that how text is spelled. Anyway, I know you had an anxious four hours...and anything can happen. Mostly a kid is being a kid, but still...Angelina's impulses are working!She's a great mother.

My son used to do the same implusive thoughtless stuff. In Phoenix though, I'd be more worried about him being jumped into a gang before he ever gets a chance to be intimate with a girl.13 Whew! That is so sad.

He has to start showing consideration for other people's feelings pretty soon if he wants anybody to respect him as a mature young man.