Just curious, since my little guy is only 7 weeks, but why is it so bad to let them wean themselves at this point? Or what about giving expressed milk in a cup? I don't understand why the delivery system is so important? As long as they get Mommy's Milk, is it that important how they get it?

Well, once a baby hits the 2-4 month mark, your milk production changes from hormone-driven to supply/demand. So, if you choose to wean and exclusively pump, you may have some supply issues. Plus, exclusively pumping moms have to work hard for that milk--its a lot easier just to nurse, if at all possible. (I always admire moms who exclusively pump--they work so hard!!)

Last, breastfeeding is more than just the milk itself--its comfort and protection and so many things that I don't have words to describe. Did you know that if your toddler gets sick, that by his suckling, he's putting his germs right into your body--long before he shows symptoms--and then while he's sick, and nursing, he's getting all those antibodies! Its really amazing how our bodies stay so in tune with our nurslings.

I nurse in the dark in the bedroom topless. (Lovely picture I know) Oh, and I don't offer eye contact when nursing in bed. If I look at her she wants to play. My DD is 7 mos though.
She doesn't like to wait for a let down, sometimes she cries. It does make the milk letdown faster. I think of it as she wants mommy milk...it's just not fast enough.

Any more advice?? I guess you can't always make these stubborn little people do what you want them to! If it comes down to it, I suppose I could pump and give my milk to her in a cup. So far she won't drink breastmilk in a cup, only water or juice.

Grrrrrrr! Why won't she do what's best for her!!

Thanks for listening!!
Elizabeth

I think it's great you've nursed your DD as long as you have. But maybe she does know what's best for her? I know that's probably not what you want to hear, and I totally get not wanting to have a sick, whiny kid on your hands that won't be easily comforted with nursing. Maybe it's just time.

(Is there any possibility you're pregnant? I've heard kids very often self-wean when mom gets pg again because it changes the taste of the milk.)

I just wanted to say that Ladonna hit the nail on the head about WHY it matters whree the milk comes from. I can't HARDLY pump, I'm lucky if I get FOUR ounces after she sleeps all night. I wish I could for other times but I can't get a letdown. There are many reasons that I love nursing its a special time and I get to relax with one of God's most precious gifts!! If I couldn't get her to nurse I KNOW that my supply would dry up quick. I've tried fungreek and everything else to up it when she's gone on strikes and nothing works better than her nursing! You'll see! lOL

i've done this both ways...exclusively pumping (for a year) for a babe that couldn't latch on and bfing my nearly 6 month old. i would be hysterical if my 14 mo dd seemed to be weaning. lots of moms love bfing and work very hard to get it going and want to keep at it for as long as possible, and certainly 2 years which is the biological minimum for most babes. it is so much more than a delivery system. it is love, and comfort and cuddle, and intimacy and so so so much more.

I feel your pain.

HAve you read Mothering your Nursing Toddler? I haven't but it is apparently good. Post on iso maybe?

do you cosleep? or co-nap? you might try that....

i don't have any experienc enurinsg a toddler but i just wanted to say

OMG I SWEAR I could have written this same story!! It sucks. Do hang in there though. Kaytlynn is now 17 months and things have gotten much better. She too went through a stage when she didn't want to nurse before naps or going to bed. A couple of days she wouldn't nurse but one or two times at the most. She wouldn't even nurse in the mornings. She is also one that HATES to wait for my let down, she gets very frustrated.
Since about 12 months is when she started getting this way and by about 14 months thats exactly how she was. I just kept trying to get her to nurse. Obviously you can't FORCE Them to nurse but I did offer over and over again. I alos get in the shower with her and she'll nurse there. She is finally to the point where i know that she'll nurse only about 2-3 times a day and once before going to bed. Usually it's only 3 times including that one. I try not to stress about it and TRY to think positive that at least I'm getting those two times for sure. I STILL haven't given milk for the same reason as you. She's VERY small only 19 lbs at 17 months and my doc. told me to start giving her milk. I've decided I'm not ready and just give her more cheese and yougort. Like I said just hang in there. Maybe together we can make it to two years!! Good luck!

I'm not glad that I'm not the only one--because it sucks that you're having this problem too. Still, it's kind of nice not to be alone!

I do remember that as my son got older, we didn't nurse very often during the day. It was fine that way for me, and I believe the antibodies in your milk become more concentrated (more per unit of milk) to compensate for the decrease in volume. So if we can do a 2-3 times a day consistently, perhaps that will be fine. Maybe getting over this first stage will allow nursing to get into a habit that they'll sustain until they're two-ish.

I nurse in the dark in the bedroom topless. (Lovely picture I know) Oh, and I don't offer eye contact when nursing in bed. If I look at her she wants to play. My DD is 7 mos though.
She doesn't like to wait for a let down, sometimes she cries. It does make the milk letdown faster. I think of it as she wants mommy milk...it's just not fast enough.

I've got two styles of nursing. When DD is sleepy or sleeping, I keep my eyes totally closed. During the day, even when I'm trying to get her to nap, I play the "where's mommy's nose, eyes, etc." game. She doesn't cry for a faster letdown, she just squirms out of my lap and goes off to explore something else! I've got to be quick to compete with all the fascinating stuff in the world!

Karen, yeah, my husband thinks maybe she's weaning herself because she's ready. Am I trying to keep her nursing for me or for her? It does seem that, ideally, breastmilk would be a major component of their diet until they are at least two. I think she does want to nurse, but she's rather impatient! She most wants to nurse at times when she is most uncomfortable (tired, hungry) and least patient! It's as if she really wants something from me (comfort, relief, security) and it just plain annoys her when it doesn't come through fast enough!

I do really, really want her to keep nursing. I hope it's not unfair that it's obviously somewhat for me as well.

Sienna, I'm totally impressed that you exclusively pumped for a year! My DS was premature, so I had to pump for him while he was learning to nurse. Man, that's a *ton* of work! It's probably more than double the work of just nursing! (and I hate washing all the stuff all the time!) I'm so glad nursing is working out for you now. Enjoy it! You deserve it! (thanks for the book suggestion too. I'll see if I can get it from the library.)

Is there any chance she's teething? My dd (12 months) will semi-nursing strike for a week or so when she's teething, or has an ear infection.
Also have you changed your routine at all?
If your dd is a picky nurser, she may go on nursing strike for say, sending her to daycare for a couple hours while you work out, or something like that.
Pretty much any change in our routine tends to make my daughter mad at me, and she shows it by refusing to nurse.
Just keep offering (heck, maybe even go topless at home during the day to "entice" her) and know that you've done a great job!
Hugs!