I've convinced myself that I am in love, but what has that accomplished?

It has accomplished a great deal, that's what. Knowing that how I am thinking and how I feel is excused by the definition of "falling in love", a normal human emotion, keeps me sane. It's ordinary to have a liking of someone in your life, right? Even if it's for a long time? Even if it's about someone you barely talk to? Even if it makes you feel like crying more often than rejoicing about it every single day of your life? Even if everything you do reminds you of that one person? Even if it's impossible to go through one day without wondering if they're thinking of you? Even if you know, somewhere, deep down inside, that you really don't love him at all and it's just an obsession? Even if you try your hardest to destroy that thought and persuade your heart that he's the only one out for you? Even if you know that the feeling will fade someday? Even if you believe you have a future with him? Even if you believe that's impossible, and that could never happen? …Even if you believe in miracles?

I ignored myself and continued my way to fifth period. I wanted to get there as quickly as I could, so I didn't have to be the last to walk inside the class room. People always automatically focus their attention on the new kid that enters the room. If it's someone they know, they say hello. If it's someone they don't know, like me, they look at you for a second longer, awkwardly, then go back to whatever they were doing, not sure why they took that extra second to comprehend whether if they knew the new comer or not. Of course they don't know me. I don't know them. Why should they know me?

Keeping my eyes glued to the floor, I swiftly made my way into the class room. Already, I felt my classmate's eyes burning on my face.

How does he do that? He has eyes on him all the time, and he never cringes. Never. Am I just not used to it, yet? He is older than me, and I'm only a freshman. Was he like this when he was my age…?

I passed the row of science tables and sat down in my seat, in the middle of the room. Luckily for me, my science partner, who sits next to me, is the most social person in my entire graduating class. Sarcasm, of course. I do not see him as proof as luck. He's the soul of positive attention, and a good natured kid all around, however. The only thing that I don't like about him is that he always has at least five or six people surrounding him, talking about sports, or music. Sometimes they just joke around. I kind of wish I knew his name- I've known him since fourth grade. Yet, every time I learn it, I forget again.

Is it possible that he was a socialite, like this kid? I know he's really big on classic rock music- but was he into sports too? Probably not. He'd be against it, I think. Oh of course, he must. Definitely.

I'm against sports now. Why spend time training and training for something as silly as a game? There's no gain from it besides getting all sweaty and bruised. What's the point and purpose? It's an idiotic routine, and doesn't show any form intelligence or creativity.

Wait… His best friend plays soccer. Would he be that harsh?

I don't enjoy sports much. I wouldn't take my own time training, it's kind of silly. But, it does bring some positive energy from fans, and it is fun, generally. I wouldn't go out myself, getting sweaty and bruised, but I'd be happy to support my friends if they are into it.

Of course! Our minds think alike. Why wouldn't we get along?

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