“No, not that one…hmmm that one’s OK…” It has to be different, I have to be different – but do I want to change me? Or others perception of me? Well that’s the easiest question I’ve asked so far! Dreaming of a genie, 3 wishes, teeth that don’t need brushed, weight that stays off, hair that stays on… So why the obsession with different? Is it because I always tried so hard to fit in, without realising I never would? I remember simple pleasures, walking alone. I remember the pressures of walking home from school with others. Enjoying attention, never seeking it, always desiring it. Unsure of my confidence, unwilling to make a fool of myself (THAT’S why I don’t …

Which is more important to you – your body or your mind? If you had the choice, how which would you sacrifice? Would you sacrifice your imagination, intelligence, sense of logic for the ability to walk down the street, to run along a beach, to climb the highest peak and admire the view? Bye bye Mind. So you can walk, run, climb, swim, and more. You climb that mountain, and stand astride the top, and survey the world beneath you. You swim in the bluest oceans, diving to the coral reefs below to be with the exotic fishes, in the warm currents under the water. But what kind experience would it be if the mind was gone, no emotion to …

A myriad of disjoined thoughts, flittering about, lighting on reason and logic for the briefest of moments. Related illusions, bare facts, optimism, despair, hope, laughter. Life is odd at the moment, contradicting circumstances are beginning to reflect on each other, the negative affecting the positive. All the time my thoughts refuse to stay hidden, and leap into the forefront of my mind. Not a bad thing, but a distraction nevertheless. The focus shifts again, maybe if… what if… searching for answers, knowing that none will present themselves. Focus shift – the future, gleaming, bright, shiny, new. Obtainable? Easy way out, difficult choices. Salvation as distractions return, day-dream, focus shift. Magpie outside commands the attention – freedom, no choices only instinct. …

BAN FOXHUNTING!…but what about the dogs? We were watching Crufts on TV the other night <insert sarcastic comment here – I can’t be bothered thinking of one>, and they did a report on the impact a foxhunting ban would have on the hounds. It was very interesting, and made me stop and think, which is always a good thing. My view on foxhunting is pretty simple, it should be banned, it’s barbaric and no longer required as there are many more humane methods of keeping the fox population down. The main focus of the report was the impact an immediate ban would have on the packs of fox hounds that are kept and bred specifically for foxhunts. Figures varied but …

It’s annoying sometimes, isn’t it – the way you want to do so much, but seem incapable of doing any of it. I annoy myself constantly, and catch myself frequently promising things I can’t deliver. Regular updates to this site for one! (but hey, I never promised that…did I?) It relates back to plans and promises, and seems an endless circle. Each time I promise anything I get two, sometimes three, steps into it, and stop. I’ll spend less time on the PC – two weeks later I’m back to the usual 1 a.m. stints. I’ll go the gym…tomorrow…I’ll get better organised..well actually that ones not going too badly. The main thing I have to learn, I think, is to …

The internet is a wonderful thing, it has removed boundaries, and connected the world. Three cheers for Tim Berners Lee!! Or perhaps not… I was looking through some of my rants on here, and was quite shocked to find how quickly I had forgotten the incidents and issues I was so vehemently spouting about. Well, forgotten isn’t really the right word, but the issues had certainly slipped to the back of my mind (which I must clear out soon). So what is this an indication of? My lack of integrity and true morals? Probably. But I think, or maybe want to believe, that there is another answer. How many emails do you READ a day? How many news sites do …