Googly Eyed Tomatoes Exposes Entitled Brats

by admin on August 30, 2011

Ooooh, you all are going to LOVE reading this story.

Adult children’s ‘bad mothering’ lawsuit dismissed

Raised in a $1.5 million Barrington Hills, Ill., home by their attorney father, two grown children have spent the last two years pursuing a unique lawsuit against their mom for “bad mothering” that alleges damages caused when she failed to buy toys for one and sent another a birthday card he didn’t like.

The alleged offenses include failing to take her daughter to a car show, telling her then 7-year-old son to buckle his seat belt or she would contact police, “haggling” over the amount to spend on party dresses and calling her daughter at midnight to ask that she return home from celebrating homecoming.

Last week, at which point the court record stood about a foot tall, an Illinois appeals court dismissed the case, finding that none of the mother’s conduct was “extreme or outrageous.” To rule in favor of her children, the court found, “could potentially open the floodgates to subject family childrearing to … excessive judicial scrutiny and interference.”

In 2009, the children, represented by three attorneys including their father, Steven A. Miner, sued their mother, Kimberly Garrity. Steven II, now 23, and his sister Kathryn, now 20, sought more than $50,000 for “emotional distress.”

Miner and Garrity were married for a decade before she filed for divorce in 1995, records show.

The remaining part of this news article describes the “inappropriate” birthday card as being American Greetings card that had a picture of tomatoes spread across a table that were indistinguishable except for one in the middle with craft-store googly eyes attached. The inside printed sentiment was, “Son I got you this Birthday card because it’s just like you … different from all the rest!” Mom had the audacity to write, “Have a great day! Love & Hugs, Mom xoxoxo.”

Cruel, sadistic mother! Her nefariousness is compounded even further when she failed to put any money in the card. Folks, we are witnesses to the greatest evil ever inflicted upon poor, innocent children. Googly eyes. Got that? Googly eyes plus no money is a deprivation tantamount to emotional abuse. You all watch out because if I ever put a picture of a googly eyed vegetable in my responses here, you will know that I intended the highest form of ugly commentary on you I could think of.

Spoiled rotten brat, um, ahem (cough, cough), I mean Kathryn Miner, aged 20, claims being told by her mother to come home at midnight from a homecoming party and having a budget restriction for a dress were all deprivations so profound that years later she is irreparably damaged.

As someone in the article’s comments noted, the internet can be forever and deep stupidity such as this will live on in infamy for DECADES (cue the horror violins). What employer or future spouse would ever hire or date either Kathryn Miner, age 20, or Steven Miner II, age 23? If either adult child turns out to be a ne-er-do-well, can we say we were surprised?

I am disappointed that the judge in this case, Kathy Flanagan, declined to assess sanctions against the children’s lawyer, who just happened to be their father, Steven A. Miner. Remember that name all you Chicago area readers…do you really want to hire this kind of idiot attorney? Flanagan should have slapped Miner with paying Garrity’s legal fees for bringing a frivolous, ridiculous, and obviously vengeful lawsuit on behalf of his kids.