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Sorry to Say, But Money Can Buy You Happiness…

Yeah I said it! And I ain’t taking it back either! So… Close your mouths, I am just getting started.

I am truly convinced that rich people made up this stupid phrase, “Money can’t buy you Happiness”. Where oh where did they get this bullshit from? Because as far as I can see, if this sentence were true then us common folk must be extremely joyously happy, what with all the poverty and economic unrest. We struggle just to try and pay the bills which in turn puts stress on the household, marriages, relationships and friendships. Not to mention all the robberies, burglaries, and all the other illegal shit that people do just to hustle to get some paper in their pockets. Oh yeah sure, we must be the happiest euphorically grin stricken idiots on the planet. Didn’t you know that when they hold you up at gun point to get your possessions its actually their way of showing you just how happy they are? They are frolicking through a field of happiness. Even the movie “The Pursuit of Happiness” which was based on a true story, should really have been called, “Acquiring Money for the Pursuit of Happiness”. But that somehow doesn’t have a pretty ring to it. Let’s be honest people, he was in the pursuit of money, which in turn bought him his house, put food on the table for his kid, was able to take warm showers, buy clothes and therefore because of all this he finally became happy and content with life.

In retaliation us common folk sit there struggling, worrying (which makes us look older BTW! ) and do you know what we end up saying to ourselves? ‘Well money doesn’t buy you happiness’. Yes we too say the same thing just to mask the pain and worry that we are actually feeling helpless. So to make us feel better we say the same damn phrase. It’s funny because I found myself saying it a while back. “Nah, I feel sorry for those rich people. They must be lonely without a sense of reality, because there’s no way that money can buy happiness”. I was an idiot. Now I sit here and think, hell, I can do lonely if I were rich. I mean I do lonely already. I’m an only child living in a country with no family, who also happens to be single and a hermit. Shit, I do lonely just fine and I am good at it. Now, show me the money! (Jerry McGuire style of course). But joking aside, money makes you feel secure, empowered, happy, and worry-free. Yes, money most certainly can make you smile.

The most important things that money can do is that it can be your champion when it comes to getting the best doctors in town. It can be your trainer when it comes to getting the best fitness instructor and gym memberships. It can be your beautician that helps you find your fountain of youth. It can be your saviour when consulting with the best lawyer. It can be your dietician when you are in need of expensive exotic organic food. It can be your professor when it comes to a 5 star education. It can be your warrior soldier that protects your home with the top notch security system, it can be your shrink when you have one too many voices in your head and so on and so on.

What would the life of a person be who had all this money? Well, it would a glorious one. These people will be beautiful, fit, great smile, beautiful eyes, great careers, and youthful looking throughout their whole lives. They would have had the best opportunities throughout life. The best schools, the best pick of partners (lucky them even more money) the best doctors (those boobs and botox don’t come cheap) and lots of people trying to better your life in every way possible. Did you know that studies were done which concluded that society responds better to pretty people. To the well groomed people. If you are beautiful chances are that you will be better received. More people will want to be your friend and more opportunities will be handed to you. Now, let’s flip it around. What if these same “beautiful” wealthy people didn’t have money, how would they have grown up? Well, they might not be that fit because they can’t afford the best food or gym membership. They will not have the best smile because they couldn’t afford braces. Their beautiful eyes will be covered up by glasses. They wouldn’t have had their pick of the best schools because the top schools are looking for one needle out of a thousand haystacks. They will appear stressed, worried because they are struggling to paying off their debts. And forget about boob jobs, and botox. It will be a different life to say the least.

I am by no means saying that you need to be rich to accomplish great things in life. Absolutely not. I have seen so many of my friends become something fantastic because they worked hard to create their own little empire. And I admire that. But the general Joe working 9-5 in a shitty job will not be striving for greatness the hard way. The average Joe will be struggling to get by and greatness to him will be paying the bills on time and putting food on the table.

The sad depressing fact is what us common idiots think of first. We think of what materialistic shit we are going to buy once we get some big money. And the reason for these thoughts are because we are in a world where celebrities are admired flaunting their expensive shit that we would never be able to afford in our lifetime. We are like the greyhound who never actually gets the bone. I of course am no better. I have gotten sucked in to buying shit I don’t need because it’s what makes you fit in. This is the illusive lifestyle that we strive for. This is what our wonderful modern day society looks like. A big superficial whorebag. Where young women would do practically anything for Louboutin shoes, spas, jewellery and a great house and where young men realise quite quickly that money can get you lots of hot women even if their own gene pool had not been that of pedigree. And if you have money then the world is your playground.

I would like to imagine that society could get rid of poverty but we are a greedy bunch of assholes. People will always want more. And as nice as it would be to live in an equal and utopian society I’m just not that naïve of a person.