Hopeless despair that your views aren’t properly represented in government

Ongoing confirmation that hell is older white Christian men making decisions about your body on your behalf

Lack of Vitamin D from staying indoors all day reading pre-revolution Russian literature

Dry eye from wistful glances back to a time when participatory democracy really meant something, ya know?

Anxiety from sipping too much black coffee while pondering yet again if Bernie Sanders could have won

A crushed soul as you realize all historical civilizations have ended in tyrannical religiosity

The gnawing feeling that, I mean, nothing matters anyway, we’re all going to die sooner or later

Cancer

The Higgs Weldon is a humor website with funny stories, articles, cartoons, and one liners. It was started by the Los Angeles stand-up comedy community, but takes submissions from everybody. Please read and enjoy our jokes!