Search This Blog

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Ever think about how much you influence other people? I know I didn't either....until something happened the other day and I had to consider the influence we really have on each other.

It is the butterfly thing, you've heard of it right?

Sorry Einstein, "The Butterfly Effect"

Here is the explanation....The Butterfly effect is a term used in chaos theory to describe how initial conditions can affect large, complex systems. The term comes from the suggestion that the flapping of a butterfly's wings in South America could affect the weather in Texas, meaning that the tiniest influence on one part of a system can have a huge effect on another part.

Wow, I feel like the scarecrow (thank you Chelle) right after he got a brain...spouting all kinds of smart, intellectual stuff -

The reality is our lives truly reflect the butterfly effect...the tiniest influence in our lives can have a huge effect on other parts of our lives....

For instance...My uncle called the night before my mother's funeral. He couldn't attend and I was giving the eulogy...he wanted to give me support knowing I was going to be scared and useless. This is how it came out...."Donna! You can do this...you remember you are made of better stuff." That's it, one conversation, not only did I get through the eulogoy, but I have heard that voice for the past 12 years. When I get in a position where I need extra confidence, I just remember that fine Texas voice..."Donna! You are made of better stuff." And I remember I am.

My speech teacher in high school....a woman I already thought was made of gold, telling me simply...."You are good....you are really good." That one statement moved me through college. When I fell short, when criticism was intense.....and when I couldn't hear my better angels, her words would come to me..."You are good.."

The parent of one of my seminary students called one night to talk about her daughter. There had been some serious problems and I was one of many trying to help. She said this amazing thing to me...."you probably don't think about us very often, but we think about you every day." I was without words. She didn't mean it to be flattering....what she was saying and what I understood so plainly was....we need help and you are helping us and we are so grateful.

Recently a dear friend saved us in a way no one was else was able to. The butterfly effect...I whispered in his ear....."There will never be a night that passes that we don't pray for you and for your family, we are grateful forever." What he did for us was a sacrifice for him...but he followed an impression and it helped us so much.

Jan Graham sending the Mormon Missionaries to my home...one phone call changed my life forever. I learned how to share what means the most to me.

Pat Scott bringing a cooked ham to my home after a miscarriage...I learned how to bring in meals.

Betsey Holley coming to my house with a car full of food after a particularly difficult episode in my life....we cooked and laughed all afternoon! I learned how to serve my friends.

My grandmother teaching me how to set a table...and to never save your good things for a day that might not come. I learned how to share the best of what I have with others.

My daughter telling me her teacher only liked the "cool kids". I learned how important it is to treat people with love and respect...no matter how young they are.

My mother-in-law telling me how happy she was I married her son. I learned to accept people even if their culture and religion was different.

Beth Miller insisting I move back to Las Vegas from Houston....one month later I met my husband and began building the family I love so much. I learned to listen to wise people!

Molly Hyer who loved me when I was mess...never gave up on me and now cries each time she sees me....I learned to love people even when they don't really seem to want it, and are a little hard to love.

There have been endless times I have been the recipient of a small act that influenced my life in a big way.

The Butterfly effect works the other way too....negative flapping of butterfly wings...and I have let those demons shout my better angels down....but it's not much fun. So I continue to work hard to hear my angels....and to look hard to see what the smallest fluttering of butterfly wings will bring to my life.

Remember, remember, remember......we influence people every day.....mostly when we aren't looking.

We cannot escape the influence our lives have on the lives of others...President Thomas S. Monson.