I’ve always loved the song “Games Without Frontiers” by Peter Gabriel. For me, the song has an incredible mix of depression and hope. There’s power and powerlessness in the face of “the game” at the same time. I never get a feeling that one person is going to “win out” over the next person. I never get the feeling that the situation will ever stabilize. To me, it’s a representation of ‘the game’ and how each person comes to the table with their own set of abilities and shortcomings and the chips fall where they may…….

Mercs

I woke up this morning thinking about this song, because for me, it exemplifies the mercenary nature of dating in New York City.

We’re all ‘Mercs’. We have to be, because people throw pretty heavy ‘game’ at us, and if you’re not a shark yourself, you’ll get eaten by the sharks. It’s just plainly not as simple as people lay it out in these fairy tale relationship stories where some guy in the sticks marries his high school sweetheart or the girl he met when he went to the General Store to buy cereal and gasoline at the same location.

The ‘problem’ is that we all want something, and we’re willing to play hardball to get it. It’s honestly like a war-time scenario. I’m not proud of that or happy about it, but that’s how it is. You just have to know that when you step to a chick and introduce yourself, you’re about to get whatever she wants to give you that will further her own agenda. It’s not “the truth”. It’s not “who she really is”. It’s what she’s willing to present to you in order to get you to do what she wants you to do.

Women have to be that way, because men are that way towards them. Obviously, guys are going to say or do whatever they need to in order to get laid, which is the bottom line. All this jockeying for position is a constant quest for CONTROL of the other person, usually for two different reasons…

It’s very tough for me to write this morning (Saturday, March 07, 2009). I have a couple of topics, but they’re only partial thoughts. Normally, when I post, I can see all the way to the end before I even start writing.

I had a really *QUALITY* time last night, and it’s blocking my ability to think. Thank You. 😉

Thoughts keep starting and stopping. Strangely enough, it’s like my (current) sidebar widget that spins my tag words around in a “cat-ball” that you can click on to see posts tagged with that word. Concepts enter, and I think they’re going somewhere, and then they just fade away and disappear… eventually to be replaced by another fleeting thought.

A reader asked me if I had mistakenly used the term “diluted” instead of “deluded” the other day when I was talking about people. I said something like “people dilute themselves”, and they thought I might have meant “people delude themselves”. What I didn’t express well enough by using a term that I made up myself and then not explaining it (another great sentence by me! 😀 )

Ostensibly unedited, spontaneous live or recorded performances, as in film, music, and dramatic and comic monologues, intended to recreate the raw experience of the person portrayed or the performer.

Mostly, what I write is what I’m thinking at the time, which is why it’s essentially the same “show” when people talk to me as it is when people read my dating blog posts. Because of this, there are times where I don’t fully explain something, because it makes perfect sense to me. Like I wouldn’t explain how to greenscreen (bluescreen) myself, I’d just do it:

So anyway, what I didn’t properly explain was that by being inauthentic with people, you’re diluting their experience of you. All these games that you play… All these hoops you want people to jump through… All these times that you’re requesting for them to demonstrate to you WHY they should START being who they really CAN be for you, it’s really putting you in a bad light. Continue reading “Dilution of Experience”