It’s a very easy thing to forget, because it’s so unpleasant to consider. The idea of becoming seriously ill or even dying while your children are young, is every parent’s worst fear. But putting off having an estate plan with a will or trust that prepares for this possibility is so important. Doing it will provide peace of mind, and a road forward for those who survive you, if your worst fears were to come true.

Start with a will. In a will, you’ll name a guardian, the person who would be in charge of rearing your children and have physical custody of them. Don’t assume that your parents will take over, or that your husband’s parents will. What if both sets of parents want to be the custodians? The last thing you want is for your in-laws and parents to end up in a court battle over custody of your children.

Another important document: a trust. You should have life insurance that will be the source for paying for the children’s education, including college, summer camps, after-school activities and their overall cost of living. In addition, proceeds from a life insurance policy cannot be given to a minor.

However, what if your son or daughter turned 18 and were suddenly awarded $500,000? At that age, would they know how to handle such a large sum of money? Many adults don’t. A trust allows you to give clear directions regarding how old the child must be, before receiving a set amount of money. You can also stipulate that the child must complete college before receiving funds or reach certain milestones.

An estate plan with young children in mind, must have a Power of Attorney for financial decisions and one for medical decisions. That allows a named person to make important financial and medical decisions on behalf of the child. You may not want to have their legal guardian in charge of their finances; by dividing up the responsibilities, a checks and balances system is set into place.

However, for medical decisions, it is best to have one primary person named. In that way, any care decisions in an emergency can be made swiftly.

While you are creating an estate plan with your children in mind, make sure that your estate plan has the same documents for you and your spouse: Power of Attorney, medical Power of Attorney, a HIPAA release form and a living will.

An estate planning attorney can advise you in creating an estate plan that fits your unique circumstances, especially when it includes young children.

01/17/2019

It might not be the easiest conversation you have ever had. However, it is a good idea to have a talk with your loved ones about what steps to take as you go through the aging process, according to The Des Moines Register in “In 2019, resolve to have a difficult conversation.”

The person who is contemplating needing help, may want to start the conversation but the person who may be called on to help may find it too difficult to consider. Who wants to think about their parents getting frail and needing help going to the bathroom? No one.

The person who is starting to feel the impact of aging may already be aware of some limitations. However, talking with their children or potential caregivers, may change the conversation from “someday” to “soon.” The loss of independence is one of the big milestones, just as gaining independence is a milestone earlier in life. That’s a hard thing to accept for both sides.

Those who have lived through this process of needing to become caregivers, say that it would have been easier, if they would have known what their loved ones wanted. So, would have been knowing what kind of help their loved ones could afford. It’s better to have time to research available resources in advance, rather than operating in crisis mode.

Seven out of 10 people over age 65 will need help from others at some point. Most will need it for at least three years, so it might be wise to have the conversation before a difficult situation arises.

11/07/2018

End-of-life circumstances are not always known in advance, so it is important to prepare for emergency solutions and what life-saving measures are acceptable. Are family members prepared to make those decisions, or would you prefer to plan for those in advance? All of these questions are best answered in advance, according to The Herald-Mail titled “It’s never too early to prepare for the end of life.”

Spare your loved ones from the agony of making decisions, based on what they think you might have wanted by planning in advance for what is, without question, unpleasant to consider. Nevertheless, in today’s era of medical technologies, such scenarios are quite possible. Let’s start with the advance directive.

Advance directives are legal documents that include both a living will and medical power of attorney. The living will allows you to document your specific preferences for medical care at the end of life. These range from aggressive intervention that saves your life, to palliative comfort care that gives medication to alleviate pain and suffering. There is a wide range between the two, so it is imperative that your healthcare agent knows what you want.

A medical power of attorney lets you designate a trusted person—spouse, friend or adult child—to make decisions for medical care, if you cannot do so. This is also known as a health care surrogate or proxy.

Here’s what happens when no advance planning has occurred. A critical medical situation arises, and family members are contacted. Without having had a discussion about the person’s wishes, typically an aging parent, siblings don’t know what to do. If they do know what to do, but there is no legal document attesting to their parent’s wishes or if the legal document is not physically present, the medical provider is bound by their own determination of the situation and their professional code of ethics.

That action may not be what you would have wanted. However, your family or trusted friends do not have the right to make decisions, if legal documents are not in place. The solution is relatively simple: plan in advance.

First, give serious thought to what you would want to occur. Make a list of questions to discuss with your primary health care physician.

Second, have a conversation with family members and friends about your wishes, and discuss with them their role in such situations. Are they willing to carry out your wishes and to take on this responsibility?

01/22/2016

A recent article in Hometown Life article, titled "Plan ahead to assure secure future for aging parents," stressed the importance of planning ahead for elderly parents are or may become physically or mentally unable to care for themselves. This process should include two important documents: a power of attorney—which can give an adult child legal authority to act on behalf of elderly parents with financial matters—and a medical power of attorney—to help them in medical matters. By starting early, children and their parents can work together to create these documents. The article also answers questions on a few other topics:

What about putting your name on your parents' bank accounts?

Children should not be joint owners, because you’ll be subjecting your parents' assets to all of your liabilities, causing issues for future benefits. The government is more likely to scrutinize a joint account if the parent applies for Medicaid when transitioning to a skilled nursing facility. Instead, a signed financial power of attorney allows an adult child to pay bills, sign checks, and help the parent with other financial matters—without the need for joint bank accounts.

Who pays when an elderly parent, on Medicare, needs rehab in a skilled nursing center?

Medicare may pay 100 percent of the first 20 days. After that, Medicare may pay 80 percent, and supplemental insurance may pay the other 20 percent of the bill. There is a 100-day Medicare benefit, but not everyone qualifies. You also need to have a 30-day wellness period outside the hospital or a skilled nursing center for that benefit to reset. For example, if the parent leaves the facility on Day 20—but returns the next week—they start where they left off at Day 21 because they didn't have a 30-day wellness period.

Should I give any money away if considering entering a skilled nursing home (with Medicaid)?

No, Medicaid will examine the past five years of your finances when you apply for coverage. If you have given money away, you could be severely penalized with long periods of ineligibility and you may not get Medicaid even if you have zero dollars.

11/25/2015

An estate plan for people who have been married can be easier than it is for singles because most married people want the bulk of their estates to go to their spouses or descendants.

Similarly, most married people will grant a spouse or child the authority to act as a medical power of attorney and a general durable power of attorney. However, as the New York Times points out in “Estate Planning for the Never-Married” these decisions are not as obvious for people who have never been married and who have never had children, especially if they live far away from their closest relatives.

Deciding who gets what property after a single person passes away is a matter of understanding the laws of intestacy. If a single person passes away without an estate plan, then those laws dictate that the closest surviving relatives will inherit.

Normally, that means parents and siblings will receive the estate, but if none of them is still alive then the law can get complicated. For this reason single people will want to have estate plans so they can choose who gets what after they pass away.

Granting someone power of attorney in the event of incapacity can be more difficult. Most people would prefer to appoint family members. However, if no family lives nearby, then often a trusted friend or partner might need to be appointed.

As our friends and partners often change over time single people usually need to change their choices every few years. An estate planning attorney can help meet those challenges.