http://www.jewishworldreview.com --
IN A BIG PRODUCTION, requiring a police escort for the full 55-mile trip, Elian Gonzalez
spent last Saturday night at a dinner party at the home of major Democratic fund-raisers in
Georgetown. Must have been a barrel of laughs for a 6-year-old. But this was an important
engagement: Time is running short on acclimating Elian to life under a communist dictator, and
a Georgetown dinner party was just the place to start.

There are still a few lies about that raid to be cleared up -- particularly in honor of the
"Million Mom March" this Sunday, in which the harridans will stop scolding us about our rights
under the 21st Amendment long enough to scold us about our rights under the Second Amendment
instead.

Relying on the media's complete, abject ignorance of firearms, the administration and its
lackeys have insisted on calling the MP-5 submachine guns carried by the Delta Force Gang
"automatic rifles." That sounds so much more compassionate than "machine gun" -- which is what
an "automatic rifle" is. (For the record, an "assault weapon" is a mere semiautomatic rifle,
significantly less impressive than the gun pointed at Elian.)

More absurd is the administration's repeated demand that we applaud the SWAT team thug's
forbearance for not having his finger on the trigger. As all gun owners know, the only time
your finger goes on the trigger is when you are going to shoot. Consequently, the crucial datum
about the trigger finger's location tells us nothing more than that the SWAT team member didn't
actually shoot Elian.

Good for him!

And just by the way, why were federal agents conducting the raid in ski masks? Why did the
van have no license plates? Is there some unfathomable law enforcement objective for such
clandestine behavior, or is this just play-acting for the fascist regime Reno and her thugs
aspire to? It's been two weeks, and we still don't have answers to these questions.

The federal appeals court will hear arguments on one crucial aspect of Elian's asylum
petition this week. The court will consider whether a 6-year-old (or an uncle on his behalf) is
even eligible to apply for asylum in the first place.

The law states that "any alien ... irrespective of such alien's status, may apply for
asylum." Elian has submitted an asylum application. But the Clinton administration rejected
Elian's application out of hand by reading into the law an additional, unstated criterion that
does not exist -- that "any alien" excludes 6-year-olds. The court of appeals seems poised to
reject the administration's logic on this point.

As the court noted in its most recent ruling on this matter: "Plaintiff appears to come
within the meaning of 'any alien.' And the statute plainly says that such an alien 'may apply
for asylum.' ... The INS has not pointed to (nor have we found) statutory, regulatory or
guideline provisions which place an age-based restriction on an alien's ability to apply for
asylum. And we have found no pre-existing requirement that a minor, in submitting an asylum
application, must act through the representative selected by the INS."

Since the administration seems likely to lose on the law, it had to assert control over the
primary witness. Indeed, the only conceivable reason Janet Reno could have had for extricating
Elian from his Miami relatives and placing him in seclusion with a bunch of government doctors,
Cuban nationals and his biological father on a mission for Castro is to sway the single most
important witness on Elian's asylum application: Elian himself.

Normally, crooks bribe witnesses. The attorney general takes them by force in pre-dawn
military raids and places them in re-education camps. (Already the re-education camp's doctors
say that Elian has expressed a desire to go back to Cuba, and it has to be said, at least he'll
be safe from Janet Reno there.)

Once the appellate court rules that -- as seems probable -- 6-year-olds may be eligible to
apply for asylum, Elian will withdraw his petition and be whisked back to Cuba, where he will
be the property of the state.

Elian's only paths to freedom at this point are few and bleak. It would require the
appellate court to recognize that Elian's father is Castro's stooge, something the court has
avoided so far. Then the court could either order a guardian ad litem for Elian, or direct the
INS to consider the uncle's petition for asylum on Elian's behalf.

Elian's best hope for freedom may be that the 11th Circuit will take so long to rule that
Elian and his father and the whole communist delegation will apply for asylum -- both from
Castro and from any more of those Democratic fund-raisers in
Georgetown.

05/10/00: The truth is out there, even for the clueless 05/08/00: Barbie is a liberal Democrat 05/02/00: Moving the goalpost 04/28/00: The bastardization of justice 04/25/00: How Monica Lewinsky saved the constitution 04/24/00: It's sunny today, so we need gun control 04/19/00: No shadow of a doubt -- liberal women are worthless 04/14/00:
It takes a Communist dictator to raise a child 04/11/00: The verdict is in on Hillary 04/07/00: Vast Concoctions III 04/04/00: 'Horrifying' free speech in New York 03/31/00: Campaign finance reform brings out worst in senators 03/28/00: All the news that fits -- we print! 03/24/00: Net losses all around 03/20/00: To protect, serve --- and be spat on 03/16/00: Thank Heaven for the consigliere 03/13/00: Vast concoctions II 03/09/00: The bluebloods voted against you 03/07/00: The Tower of Babble 03/03/00: Vast concoction 03/02/00: Hillary's sartorial lies 02/28/00: You have to break a few eggs to make a joke 02/22/00: I've seen enough killing to support abortion02/18/00: A liberal lynching 02/15/00: McCain and the flag 02/11/00: The Shakedown Express02/08/00: To mock a mockingbird 02/05/00: Summing up Campaign 2000: 'Oh, puh-leeze!'02/01/00: A Confederacy of Dunces01/28/00: Dollar Bill's racist smear 01/24/00: How high is your freedom quotient? 01/21/00: Numismadness 01/18/00: How dare you attack my wife! 01/14/00: The Gore Buggernaut 01/10/00: The paradox of discrimination law