‘Eat Pray Love” author Elizabeth Gilbert’s soul search took her to Italy, India and Bali. And it was fabulous. The lucrative book deal! The glossy guru! Bonus: She met a hot Brazilian and got married!

And for the right price, you can have it all, too.

Reminiscent of the “Sex and the City” marketing might, there are more than 400 product tie-ins to the film. There’s an “Eat Pray Love” fragrance trio ($32 each at fresh.com), Dogeared brand jewelry ($152 prayer beads) and hundreds of Italy-, India- and Bali-inspired junk on hsn.com, which has partnered with the film. The goods are hard to escape — as the marketers all hope to sell women on the idea that some mediocre merchandise will jump-start the rest of their lives.

Because, you know, the road to spirituality and enlightenment can be bought on the phone for three installments of $29.95.

And if you’re planning a total life overhaul, you’ll definitely need a new $600 hand-embroidered satchel “inspired by the film” to tote your self-help books. Or the officially licensed tea (blood orange and cinnamon flavor, $11.50 at republicoftea.com) to sip pre-meditation. Right.

When I interviewed Gilbert in December at her store in Frenchtown, NJ, and asked her about the women who read the book, she said: “The women who read ‘Eat Pray Love’ are not anybody that anyone needs to be afraid of. They’re the nicest, gentlest — most kind of lonely, divorced . . . like people who have been through disappointment and are really nice and polite.” And probably a little desperate, if they believe that hanging an elephant god amulet around their necks ($200 at hsn.com) will help save their marriage. It won’t.

The last time I checked, spiritual growth wasn’t achieved through retail therapy. In the same way that buying Manolo Blahniks and a “Carrie” necklace didn’t turn you in to Ms. Bradshaw, mimicking Gilbert’s journey — travel agency STA’s “official” package for “EPL” boasts five days in Italy, eight days in India and three days in Bali — won’t end your loneliness or land you on a best-seller list.

Need to shake things up? Go the old-fashioned route — talk to your girlfriends, buy a pair of badass motorcycle boots, or simply watch “Jersey Shore” and thank the universe you’re not Snooki. Just don’t get the “official” apparel, because then you’re nothing but a sucker . . . with the T-shirt ($40 on hsn.com) to prove it.