I think Rapaire has been too long in thrall to the Sign of the Catfish. Mayhap some good spirit will come and free him from his walking dream, that he may learn of the many kinds of fish in the world, and their habitations in it.

Nope, wrong in one. Proper science consists of blowing it up, setting it on fire (same thing, only slower), or creating a really massive stink.

I know catfish water when I see it, and that's catfish water. Probably some nice channel cats, maybe even some blues. And if folks don't think that there have ever been catfish in Scotland I'll betcha there's some real whoppers in there 'cause it's never been fished for cat. Probably even a new national record for catfish in Scotland. I'd try a trotline, myself.

Well, Bunn, consider the math: one trillionth of a second is obviously too fast to even think. Yet here we are debating about a millionth, with no qualms. That qualifies, I would say. 'Course, ti depends on what you mean by "proper".

It has trout, some Arctic char, maybe salmon, but not catfish, I wouldn't think. The only catfish found in Britian is the european catfish, which was introduced in the 19th Century, and is mainly found in southern England.

By existing for one millionth of a second it counts as proper chemistry ?!?

I'd sure hate to have to pay for THAT brake job! Do they do it by pumping the brakes like you're supposed to or by just standing on the pedal?

Bunn, that looks like prime water for catfish. I'll bet there's some big one in there. Stinkbait works great, especially on a trotline or if you're jugging. If you don't have any, try cottonseed cake or raw liver. And there ain't nothin' like fried catfish and hushpuppies to help build a strong baby. Just make sure you take lots of lard and cornmeal with you.

You'll have to excuse me from looking after mom over the weekend, we're galavanting off to Here Unfortunatly, we don't have the time, or the group to get up into the really interesting bits of the Cairngorms, but it could snap into proper winter up on the tops at any time, and our most experinced mountain leader is 6 months preganant...

The Athena collaboration, an experimental group working at the CERN lab in Geneva, has measured chemical reactions involving antiprotonic hydrogen, a bound object consisting of a negatively charged antiproton paired with a positively charged proton. This composite object, which can also be called protonium, eventually annihilates itself, creating an even number of telltale charged pions. Normally the annihilation comes about in a trillionth of a second, but in the Athena apparatus (and its very thorough vacuum conditions) the duration is a whopping millionth of a second. The protonium comes about in the following way. First, antiprotons are created in CERN‚s proton synchrotron by smashing protons into a thin target. The resultant antiprotons then undergo the deceleration, from 97% down to 10% the speed of light. Several more stages of cooling, including immersion in a bath of slow electrons, brings the antiprotons to a point where they can be caught in Athena‚s electrostatic trap. This allows the researchers to study then, for the first time, a chemical reaction between the simplest antimatter ion---the antiproton---and the simplest matter molecular ion, namely H2+ (two H atoms with one electron missing). Joining these two ions results in the protonium plus a neutral hydrogen atom (see figure at http://www.aip.org/png/2006/269.htm ). This represents the first antimatter-matter chemistry, if you don‚t count the interaction of positrons (anti-electrons) with ordinary matter. (Previously antiprotons have been inserted into helium atoms but this did not really constitute „chemistry‰ since the antiprotons merely replaced an electron in the helium atom.) According to Nicola Zurlo of the Universita‚ di Brescia (zurlo@bs.infn.it) and her colleagues, the experimental output from the eventual protonium annihilation (see depiction at www.aip.org/png) allowed the Athena scientists to deduce that the principal quantum number (denoted by the letter n) of the protonium had an average value of 70 rather than the expected value of 30. Furthermore, the angular momentum of the protonium was typically much lower than expected---perhaps because of the low relative velocity at which the matter and antimatter ions approached each other before reaction.

My wife Pat, who is currently in DC, thanks everyone for the birthday wishes. Being a dutiful spouse I copy 'n' pasted all of them and emailed 'em to her.

And she was appreciative. Really. I'm not making this up. My nickname when I was growing up was "Truthful James." I won the gold star every year I was in grade school for honesty. I would never, ever, tell a lie.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PAT!!!

But, Rapaire is always signing himself off as "Mom's favorite"!! Why wouldn't she talk to him? Has he run away again? Stayed out all night in a cheap hootch house? Been run out of town for gambling debts? Shotgun wedding? What????

Mom asks everyone to take a moment to sing "Happy Birthday" to Pat. She promises not to wince if anyone is off-key (but she might gently thwack them upside the head with her rolled up morning newspaper if they're standing too close to her when they do it).

Well, the Legion is a little short of cash right now, what with the Oktoberfest, the Septemberfest, the Julyfest, and all those things every month. And while they could afford to send me to Scotland I flatly refused to be nailed into the crate, even with their offer of a clean bucket and a fourteen course dinner (to them that means a package of weiners and a six-pack). Besides, knowing them they'd probably mark it wrong-end-up.

That there is jest a brilliant solution. I have a real long-standing offense with W Bush, and I think I will arrange a similar substitution an' let him and Richard "The Dick" Cheney stand in for against each other until they do each other in for good.

Three of them are sober as I type this, and, acting as my Seconds, send this message (I include the spellings they dictate):

You, the guy known as Bunnahabhain er somethin like that there unpronounsible word, have done gone and insultid the Idaho Legion by callin the members thereov "theiving" even though ain't none of us ever took nothin that didn't belong to us or somebody we knew wouldn't mind us borroing it. This here insult kin only be washed away by an objekt apolojee from you on your knees an in publik er by yer blood flowen frum yer death wond. Since we are the agrieved parties akordioning to the "Code Duelo" we git the choice of weepons and we chose Rapaire here to be our champeen and to advenge the Honor of the Idaho Legion with swords and/or pistols and he gits to use Rattlesnake Stan's Colt's .45 revolver fer his pistol and he kin furnish his own sword he says.

We want to meat on nutrill ground and since yer really far away we appoint the guy known as Leadfingers as our proxy and Rapaire's proxy in this here duel to the death. You guys work it out and let us know how it comes out.

Oh, fie that such a paltry visitor should take Fayre Mothere's mantle, and passing like a jackdaw, snatch it off to his own nest's lining. For shame, Leadfingers, that thou shouldst so light-fingered act. Give us back that number, I pray you.

Sir, the achievement of DOMhood is not something to be taken lightly. Some are born to it, some acquire it naturally, and yet others strive for it all their lives and never achieve anything more than a slap or a jail sentence.

The true DOM is not focused exclusively on one part of the body, but enjoys the gestalt, taking in modern terms a holistic appreciation. A DOM is not to be denigrated or derided as a simple "pervert" with "only one thing" on his mind.

A DOM does not wear ribbons or something like the gowns worn in the groves of Academe, it is not necessary (and sometimes it could even be dangeroous) for a true DOM has no need to magnify the light he shines before men.

Indeed, in the entire world there is only one thing that a true DOM fears, and that is meeting up with a DOW.

" What fond delights can steal upon me, When Johnnie kneels and kises me."

I was watching the original movie "MASH" for about the fourth time before I realized that Margaret O'Houghlihans voice kept coming over the PA going "kiss my hot lips", but she was having no trouble speaking. I probably was the only guy around so dense that it took me that long to catch on.

That's him. But he didn't enjoy it. No, not one little bit. He was very keen on nobody having any fun. In fact when he'd managed to get banned almost everything fun, the birth rate exploded, as he'd not managed to find a way to ban that, and the had very else left to do.......