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This Guy’s Story About A Female Coworker Sexually Harassing A Male Sparks A Debate On Double Standards

Sexual harassment at work is a serious problem, especially when the United States’ Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) estimates that about 80% of the victims don’t report it. Usually, because of fear of retaliation, as well as not being sure what the what behavior constitutes as sexual harassment and what does not. With so many cases kept private, it is hard to see the full picture of this issue, however, it should be taken seriously regardless of the gender of the victim or the perpetrator.

With the recent rise of sexual allegations, one user shared his own encounter with the sexual harassment his coworker experienced at work. While many people supported the coworker and his story, a lot of commenters were against his expressed sentiment that sexual harassment against males is taken less seriously. We reached out to the original poster for further comment. Scroll down to read the full story and tells us where you stand in the comment section.

One user shared a sexual harassment story he witnessed at work

Many supported him and the victim

But others couldn’t agree with his statement that “sexual harassment against men isn’t as big as a concern”

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No she isn’t. People who take sexual harassment seriously aren’t going to suddenly change their mind because of one story of a woman behaving badly. She is the excuse that sexist people and / or people who don’t care at all hide behind.

Every time another story like this shows up in the news, it does make it easier to discount other stories of abuse and harassment, even if you know it's a problem and you want the system to change and create a safer workplace for everyone.

I'm sorry but that's absurd. For any sensible being when they keep hearing stories A of a certain bad thing happening BUT at the same time keep hearing stories(and this is not the first time I hear of a woman harassing a man and getting off lightly or using a fake "sexual harassment" report to get "even" with a man) that show some stories A being a lie - they will start doubting the next story A they hear, because that's how logic works. It's the same with other things like, say, fake allergies - the more people fake allergies just to avoid things they don't like, the more suspiciously/less seriously actual allergic people will be taken. The more people scream "wolf" without an actual wolf being in the vicinity, the less likely other people are to help someone who actually gets attacked by a real wolf, you know. Sucks people do this, it just makes everything worse for everyone. IMO a fake report like this should be a punishable crime.

Bottom line, sexual harassment/assault is horrible and needs to be taken very seriously. That being said, there should be proof. I can not find a more serious way to take something than to support it with evidence.

Magdalena, you are incorrect and I’ll explain why so you can twist out of it and deny being wrong anyway. Also the framework of what you consider logic is off. Here’s why: You don’t “keep” hearing stories like this. You have heard stories like this. By your own line of thinking anyway, there’s actually literal millions more stories of women reporting sexual harassment. So using your own mental framework, you’d care more about sexual harassment. But you don’t, and you should ask yourself why. Yes, false accusations are wrong. That has exactly nothing to do with my comment. My comment was just correcting the original post that claimed that liars make it hard for truth tellers. They do not. People who care about this issue will care whether or not there are some isolated incidents of liars.

Taxi Cabs, is there something that requires you to behave like gross trash towards people you don’t know, or is that just a personal choice? What kind of trash just throws around insults like that out of nowhere? I’m sure you don’t do that in real life. Why’d you give yourself a pass to do it online? Also, you made every single line of that up in your head. Quote where I said that. You can’t. Think about that.

To the people saying there is no double standard: the punishment for the male was being fired without any evidence, the punishment for the female was a mild scolding. It doesn't matter what your personal anecdote is, THAT boss DID have a sexist double standard.

It also doesn't mean that there isn't that same double standard. You can't prove a negative. This case only applies to this case, and in this case there was a definite double standard.
Gender aside, this sort of thing is far too common in our culture, and needs to stop, period. Respect each other as human beings, for *insert deity of choice or lack thereof*'s sake.

@Peter Bear True. You're right. I just hate generalizations in some comments and I wish there were reliable statistics.The anecdotes from other workplaces are interesting too. It seems some take all sexual harassment allegations seriously, some try to avoid dealing with any, and some have double standards.

In the workplaces I've been (in my country), female bosses tend to me more assertive of their hierarchy with men. I've seen guys being told "You don't have any reasons not to come working overtime (not paid!) because you don't have a wife and children", or even "I could be your mother" because she's a dozen years older. Women can be as sexist as men, believe me!

No she isn’t. People who take sexual harassment seriously aren’t going to suddenly change their mind because of one story of a woman behaving badly. She is the excuse that sexist people and / or people who don’t care at all hide behind.

Every time another story like this shows up in the news, it does make it easier to discount other stories of abuse and harassment, even if you know it's a problem and you want the system to change and create a safer workplace for everyone.

I'm sorry but that's absurd. For any sensible being when they keep hearing stories A of a certain bad thing happening BUT at the same time keep hearing stories(and this is not the first time I hear of a woman harassing a man and getting off lightly or using a fake "sexual harassment" report to get "even" with a man) that show some stories A being a lie - they will start doubting the next story A they hear, because that's how logic works. It's the same with other things like, say, fake allergies - the more people fake allergies just to avoid things they don't like, the more suspiciously/less seriously actual allergic people will be taken. The more people scream "wolf" without an actual wolf being in the vicinity, the less likely other people are to help someone who actually gets attacked by a real wolf, you know. Sucks people do this, it just makes everything worse for everyone. IMO a fake report like this should be a punishable crime.

Bottom line, sexual harassment/assault is horrible and needs to be taken very seriously. That being said, there should be proof. I can not find a more serious way to take something than to support it with evidence.

Magdalena, you are incorrect and I’ll explain why so you can twist out of it and deny being wrong anyway. Also the framework of what you consider logic is off. Here’s why: You don’t “keep” hearing stories like this. You have heard stories like this. By your own line of thinking anyway, there’s actually literal millions more stories of women reporting sexual harassment. So using your own mental framework, you’d care more about sexual harassment. But you don’t, and you should ask yourself why. Yes, false accusations are wrong. That has exactly nothing to do with my comment. My comment was just correcting the original post that claimed that liars make it hard for truth tellers. They do not. People who care about this issue will care whether or not there are some isolated incidents of liars.

Taxi Cabs, is there something that requires you to behave like gross trash towards people you don’t know, or is that just a personal choice? What kind of trash just throws around insults like that out of nowhere? I’m sure you don’t do that in real life. Why’d you give yourself a pass to do it online? Also, you made every single line of that up in your head. Quote where I said that. You can’t. Think about that.

To the people saying there is no double standard: the punishment for the male was being fired without any evidence, the punishment for the female was a mild scolding. It doesn't matter what your personal anecdote is, THAT boss DID have a sexist double standard.

It also doesn't mean that there isn't that same double standard. You can't prove a negative. This case only applies to this case, and in this case there was a definite double standard.
Gender aside, this sort of thing is far too common in our culture, and needs to stop, period. Respect each other as human beings, for *insert deity of choice or lack thereof*'s sake.

@Peter Bear True. You're right. I just hate generalizations in some comments and I wish there were reliable statistics.The anecdotes from other workplaces are interesting too. It seems some take all sexual harassment allegations seriously, some try to avoid dealing with any, and some have double standards.

In the workplaces I've been (in my country), female bosses tend to me more assertive of their hierarchy with men. I've seen guys being told "You don't have any reasons not to come working overtime (not paid!) because you don't have a wife and children", or even "I could be your mother" because she's a dozen years older. Women can be as sexist as men, believe me!