Wednesday, September 10, 2008

No Substance

Yeah, so I haven’t been posting with the same frequency.So what.Bite me.Just the women.Harder.

Thanks.

I’m kidding.The truth is that I’ve been slaving for two weeks hunched over my keyboard and wallowing in my filth trying my hardest to come up with something worth your time.I have pages and pages and pages (two) of words I’ve found unfit to post.Every time I write something and it’s not posted, an angel’s wings get clipped.Now you understand the enormous weight on my shoulders.Why would God do this to me!Why, God!Why!

You know what?This blog looks really bland.I mean, it’s white and there’s a glass.What the hell?Invisible powdered water?What was I thinking?Oh wait, hah!I’m so brilliant.I wish there were more color here.

There, now I’m happy.If you can help me add more color, leave me a comment.I expect no comments.

Mission Statement

I write because I like making people laugh. Some of my blog entries do so, most fail miserably.

No, wait. I write because I need validation. Those of my blog entries I consider failures are those lacking in comments. Validate me with comments whether they be constructive, or contain links to pictures of ghost towns. I do love them so.

Also, perhaps a tertiary objective completely unrelated to this blog, I love playing with wax and will one day fill a pool with molten wax and throw ice cubes into it. Wouldn't that be grand?