a short story by Natasha M A long-long time ago there lived a Little Monster... Oh, sorry this was a different story... A long-long time ago, perhaps it was year 1989, I went to a huge book shop in the centre of Moscow on Tverskoj Boulevard as I usually did after work at Uni. My attention was attracted to a beautifully designed book in English called “The Little Monster Book”. I took it in my hands and the book did not want to leave them. I HAD to buy it. This beauty was written by Michael Salmon, Australian (and exotic for us, northen-landers) kids’ books author and sensational illustrator. It was November (and this is important).

I brought the book home and started reading it to Misha and Masha, our kids who were two and four at that time and could not speak much English (not like now). I was struggling myself especially with such words as "mumps" as I never met them in my life nor my mum ever cooked them for me. So how would I know? The dictionary was there though but you would not look every second word in the dictionary especially if you wanted to impress your kids with your reading skills: “What mumps? Oh, they are just bumps”. Bit by bit we worked out our way through the book guessing half of the meaning of the poems and making up stories according to the pictures inside the book. Misha and Masha's dad, Andrei was observing us for some time then he said: "Stuff you, you are not telling the correct stories and confusing kids, so I am translating these poems into English. I like them, so it will be easy". Andrei was a master of the house - he said it - he did it. Misha and Masha were even happier with the book after it was translated in Russian, thy were happier than before, well, they found the truth about the Monsters. Now the hidden meaning of the beautiful pictures got revealed. This story would end there but there was the first "but" to it...

Andrei thought a little then he decided: why not to send his perfect translations to the publishers - right down under. As a consequence - in exactly one month and just for Christmas - we got a parcel from Australia (what???) have to look it up on the map!. Who from? - you will ask? And you would be absolutely correct - it was Michael! We opened the parcel up and we were stunned speechless - there were Michael’s other even more beautiful books - who could count them? - there was a whole big pile of colorful, fantastic, amazing books! There was a letter inside that parcel that said: “Hi, my name is Michael and this a present for your kids from me. Thank you for your translation - the publishers told me you did it, so enjoy my present!"

This is how Michael was named: "a kind gnome from Australia who knew when the Christmas was". This story would end there but there was the second "but" to it...

Some years later it happened that we moved to Melbourne, Australia, in 1993. We settled up in our first house in Hawthorn next to a suburb called Kooyong. May be three months passed after our messy arrival. and Andrei said: "Let's have a look at the White Pages, you know, may be our gnome is living in Melbourne too". It happened that there was a man with the name "Michael Salmon" listed in WP who lived right across the road. We could not know if it was our kind gnome so we took were risking to be beaten up for intruding into the other "Michael Salmon's" house…

The same evening we went for a walk (thanks god, we did not have a car at that time). We took our courage and something sweet to eat with us (as you might know if you go with a visit to see a kind gnome you can not go there bare handed). We crossed the road. We knocked at the door or was it a crystal door bell hanging from a tree trunk? We were asked (as it was in the best fairy tales they always ask you): "Who is there?" Andrei answered bravely: "We came from Moscow to see you here. There are four of us by the way" (Misha and Masha were laughing out loud of course). If I was Michael I would never opened the door to us. It was a late evening already BTW. But the door magically opened up, immediately with no hesitation, and we saw HIM: he was exactly like in our dreams and visions – kind chicks, happy hair, and smiling, curious and sharp eyes - a bit chubby, our gnome Michael.

What was there? I do not remember - it was a get together of the century indeed. We were exactly those people on Earth that Michael did NOT expect!. I only remember that in about a minute we appeared in his working cabinet that was completely covered in paints of all rainbow colors. There was a table where all his fairy tales were born and Michael was like a surgeon showing us his next creation to come. We had some tea and Michael was showing us Andrei's poetry that he hanged on the wall right above his desk. We could not believe that we saw and that we actually met the right person, Michael could not believe it either. But Misha and Masha were pretty much relaxed already playing with a huge penguin-balloon. That was the story.

We met several times after that. Michael and his wife showed us Lygon Street Carlton where we had some nice pizza. It was a place where they through pizza in the air and make it round and flat. Michael invited us over and he even visited us to have our strange Russian borsch. Recently one of Michael's characters became a famous Disney star and the rights to own him were bought out for cartoons creations. This is Michael's website. Please be aware - there are lots of monsters living there. With Michael's generous permission I will place a couple of poems from Michael's book "The Little Monster Book" as a tribute to Andrei. The book is here - in front of me. I remember every page of it by heart. I will be reading it to my grand children - both English and Russian versions. We will look at the pictures and we will recall this amazing story that happened to us once... Thank you for reading it! You were the first ones to know.

website: http://www.michaelsalmon.com.au/

There are some fragments from Michael's book "The Little Monster Book" or "The Little Monster Rhyme Book" (latest version) we publish here with Michael's kind permission:

***Mrs Roberts teaches cooking.And stirs the cake-mix with out looking.Half the mixture spills down her dress,By the end of the class, there is one big mess!

***William is sick. He has the mumps,But the doctor can't tell the lumps from his bumps,He has given poor William an enormous, great pill,If that does not cure him, then nothing else will.

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