Moms That Can't Breastfeed

Can't Breastfeed?

I believe that there
are mothers out there, that just can't breastfeed, not because of
any normal breastfeeding problem, but because they are just unable.

These are mothers that have tried everything, they have tried to get help and
have still not been able to breastfeed. There is not enough support out
there for them, and they feel terribly depressed because of this. If this sounds like you, then I hope that
you will find some sort of encouragement from knowing that you are not the
only one.

Here are some stories of other moms with the same problem…

Annie...

"I
searched the web for anybody who has had a similar dilemma as myself
and could not find a single article etc. I had my little boy a year

back,
throughout my pregnancy (first pregnancy) I realised that my breasts
where not swollen, but didn’t fret a great deal about it. What does a
first time mommy know? All I knew was that I couldn’t wait to experience
holding him and breastfeeding him for the first time.

The
doctor and nurses reassured me a day after he was born, that my milk
would start coming in after the third day…so I waited…nothing! And the
worst part was everybody was still expecting me to breastfeed my
child…saying that there was no such thing as a woman who cannot
breastfeed or who doesn’t have milk. I can remember lying on the
hospital bed crying through the night with my baby, he was so hungry and
every time I called a nurse to help they would bring me 40ml of formula
milk. I tried breastfeeding for two whole months…Don stayed hungry
so I had to start feeding him formula with trying to breastfeed him.

I
asked the doctor for help and she put me on tablets, tablets that would
help me produce milk. Later I started using the pump to see how much
milk was in fact coming out, the most milk I could get out in a day was
about 100ml. After about three months of trying I stopped entirely. I
was depressed about this but my husband made me feel better by saying
that it was best if I rather stop worrying about it and just begin
feeding Donovan formula.

I was ridiculed by my own family, told
how unhealthy it was to stop breastfeeding, even though they knew how I
had struggled. Even our paediatrician when he asked if Donovan was still
being breastfed said that most mothers give up too fast! I felt
terrible…I felt like there was something wrong with me.

I really
feel that there should be more info out there for moms, especially first
time moms who feel insecure and who don’t know what to do, how to do
things properly etc. I want to have another child but I can’t bare going
through the same thing again. For me breastfeeding is very important
and I think that it really does help allot for bonding with your child
because I felt very distant towards my baby in the beginning.

I
can’t imagine being able to breastfeed and then deciding not to. It’s
such a precious gift that most people just take for granted."

Kat…

"I had exactly the same issue. No one wanted to
tell me that some women just can't breast feed. To this day I still
wonder why breastfeeding is thought of as a perfect function, why it
seems to be exempt from the complications that any biological function
may suffer. Life is not that simple. There is a reason for wet nurses
and formula beyond a stereotypical excuse like convenience. I believe
that some women just cannot produce breast milk. Whether it be hormonal
or genetic, it is a reality that for whatever reason has been
down-played and ignored by the majority of the medical community. It is
sad really. To make a woman feel like less than a woman or mother
because her breasts simply won't fill with milk is ignorant and abusive.
I wish that someone would dedicate more time, money and research into
this subject."

Amie...

“I don't typically comment related to
anything I find on the internet but I feel this article is very
important. I too experienced trying to feed my son for 6 weeks without
supplementing with formula. I was pumping in between feedings to attempt
to increase my supply and nothing. The most I ever got from both breast
was about 1 ounce. One breast was producing almost nothing. When I
decided to switch to formula and saw my constantly crying baby suck down
bottle after bottle finally getting fed it was a huge relief and I
never looked back.

After my second son was born I never even
considered breastfeeding. The first experience of angst about not being
able to produce was enough for me. Everyone made me feel like it was
about my technique but I spent hours upon hours trying everything I
could think of and working with a lactation consultant for a month. When
the nurses started giving me looks after my second son was born about
my choice to formula feed I made a declaration to all of the hospital
staff treating me and my disapproving family that this was my choice and
if they wanted to choose how to feed a baby they were welcome to have
one. No one asked anymore questions after that. I'm all for education
but I refuse to let someone make me feel guilty about a decision I
believe I am making in the best interest of my child."

By Amanda...

“I had the same problem. I could
only pump about 1-2 tbsp. a day. I pumped and pumped every day for
several weeks. But I finally gave up. I couldn't stand trying to get her
to breastfeed her sucking a little and then screaming. She wasn't
getting anything!! I was SO depressed and mad at myself over it. I
thought what kind of mother can't make milk for her baby. I took herbs
and drank herbal tea that was supposed to help. But I really couldn't
find any information or help on the subject online or from my doctor. He
said formula fed babies can be just as healthy. I don't think he
realized the emotional effect of it all! I just remember my first month
or so with my little girl as a horrible depressed miserable time. I'm
pregnant again now. I hope I can keep from feeling that same way again. I
have a different outlook on it now. My daughter is one of the
healthiest kids I've ever seen. I have no pump this time. And I'm not
going to buy one. I'm just going to try a week or two and if it doesn't
work formula will! I do wish I could find some info on what could've
caused it. But there seems to be no help out there.

Ladan...

After being so depressed to have to feed my
baby formula, i was searching for any support group or forum that would
make me feel a little better and less depressed. Surprisingly there are
many sites that supports breastfeeding and cheer for successful moms,
but absolutely none for moms who REALLY wanted to breastfeed but they
could not.

I had difficulty with both my sons, and I cannot
believe what a terrible feeling it is to fail in breastfeeding. As
someone mentioned here, you would feel exactly a less of a woman.I wish
there was something to calm down new sleep deprived moms whose bodies
are in pain because of latching positions and instead of "15 minutes" at
each breast, they spend hours awake to feed their baby.

My
newborn would drink a whole 2 oz bottle after being at my breasts for
more than 90 minutes. I gave up at month 4 with my first son and at day 7
with my second because I had a 3 year old who also needed my attention
and I could not sit there for long hours with tubes and all other kinds
of BF accessories to help with breastfeeding.

Go girls. I wish
people knew that some moms don’t choose formula because of their own
convenience but just to feed a crying hungry frustrated baby."

Stacey...

"I believe feeding Jason educated me one of my
first lessons of motherhood: no matter how much I want what is best for
my child, I can't always make it happen. And it's so annoying! Coming
into this, I wanted to breastfeed her. I'm not sure why my heart was so
set on that, but it was something that I was extremely determined to do.
After watching her lose so much weight, having a doctor suggest
supplementing with formula, crying over dry diapers, worrying that she
was dehydrated, and having a representative of the local La Leche League
tell me that the main goal was to feed her, rather than clinging so
firmly to my own preferences, I had to face the reality that I won't be
able to do what I wanted. At least not exclusively.

That
was tough, because it made me face the fact that, although I strongly
believe that she would get the most nutritional help from me, I can't
give her that. I'm getting there, with the help of every wet and soiled
diaper, the plump tiny cheeks and double chin, and every content sigh
she makes when I lay her down after giving her a bottle. It's not what I
had planned, but she seems to be blossoming now . . .

I
think most people won't actually understand or care about this problem,
but it has been overwhelming my life for the last couple of months."

June...

“I gave birth 3 months ago and wanted to
breastfeed exclusively. I did not buy a bottle or formula and brought my
baby home. After a week I realized that my baby was not gaining any
weight and that I was only producing about 6 ounces a day. I worked with
lactation consultants to increase my supply and went on drugs to
increase my supply. I felt so guilty when I finally had to give my baby
formula. I’m still using a SNS system to stimulate milk production, but
my body just doesn’t seem to want to produce milk.

I never
got any support and everything online always gives the impression that
if you want to breastfeed, you can…but it doesn’t always work out that
way. I feel like I am the only one with this problem."

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