"Sorry for being me, I don't know how to be anyone else" - Spike Milligan

Sunday, 4 June 2017

A tragic decline

I'm fascinated by those celebrities who seem set for a glittering career and then fall into a steady decline, eaten away by addictions, self-doubt, destructive friends and spouses, and the relentless pressures of fame.

I was reading about the new documentary on Whitney Houston, and the recollections of her bodyguard, David Roberts, who thinks she could have survived if those around her had been less intent on exploiting her fame and more concerned with her personal health and well-being.

As soon as he met her new boyfriend, the rapper Bobby Brown, on her 26th birthday, he suspected Brown would be a bad influence on her. He soon discovered he was verbally and physically abusive, jealous of her success, an attention-seeker, a trouble-maker, a heavy drug-user, and a womaniser.

He couldn't understand why she always indulged him and overlooked his immature behaviour, why she crushed her own personality to make him feel comfortable, why she was besotted with someone who was obviously no good for her.

In particular, he's disgusted with all the people in her entourage who were more interested in her profitability than protecting her health and keeping her from self-destruction.

"She became a commodity, a possession, a tool for making money" he says. When he wrote to her lawyers outlining his concerns, he was sacked, and never spoke to her again.

Her story has many similarities with the life of Amy Winehouse, whose promising career was also undermined by an equally unsuitable boyfriend, Blake Fielder-Civil, a growing drugs habit, the stresses of fame, and a money-obsessed entourage.

On February 11, 2012, at the age of 48, Whitney Houston was found dead, the result of drowning, heart disease and cocaine use. "So many people could have done so much to avoid that" says David Roberts. "They didn't. They abdicated responsibility in favour of greed."

20 comments:

One of life's great mysteries is people living in abusive relationships and not getting out of them. The net is full of cases and advice on how to get out of such relationships, but quite why they stay in them is a puzzle that puzzles the best psychologists.

Ramana: Actually I think therapists and/or feminists are well aware of why women in abusive relationships stay put rather than leaving. There are all sorts of reasons, in particular the woman's confidence having been so undermined that the very thought of taking such an initiative is terrifying. There's also the fear of stalking and retaliation by the rejected partner, the lack of money, and Stockholm Syndrome.

Marilyn Monroe was ruthlessly exposed and exploited by Arthur Miller, but that was OK, because Miller was a well known playwright and intellectual. Joe Dimaggio, a more straightforward abuser, just beat her up. Did she deserve this?

Hattie: Marilyn Monroe is another person who went off the rails because she couldn't cope with the pressures of fame. She had mental and physical health problems, she suffered from gallstones and endometriosis, and she was a drug addict. I don't know much about her relationships with Arthur Miller and Joe DiMaggio.

iread once about jean harlow's life too. she was also used as a commodity by her own family. she kept them all afloat in style. she should have abandoned them all.and she died even younger than all mentioned here. i think it was 26 years old. what a sad waste of a promising life.

Tammy: There's a common pattern of celebs being seen as a meal ticket by others. But in that case, why not look after their health so they stay alive and keep making money? If they die prematurely, that's the meal ticket gone. Unless their fame increases after their death of course, which often happens.

That is one of the potential risks of fame and fortune, unfortunately. Then when addictive substances are introduced the risk becomes even greater that exploitation may occur -- substances whether illegal or legal types including prescriptions. Takes character, courage to speak truth to power but that's what's needed. I was saddened when the talented Amy Winehouse succumbed and so many more.

Joared: A lot of celebs seem to take an amazing cocktail of drugs - uppers, downers, sleeping pills, painkillers, you name it. It's hardly surprising that sooner or later they take a fatal combination.

Amy Winehouse's death was utterly tragic. I think "Frank" is one of the best albums ever. Her remarkable talent just went to waste.

As someone wisely said "men are afraid of women laughing at them, women are afraid of men killing them."My life has been threatened for leaving abuse. I'm very much not alone. Add addiction to cope....And femicide is on the rise every year.Always tragic, some do it to themselves. Marilyn was so abused by powerful men.Women as meat and prey. /Rant

www: It's appalling that domestic violence is so common. And the British government is withdrawing funding from many women's refuges and rape crisis centres. As you say, women are often deterred from leaving because men make all kinds of threats. Acid attacks are the most horrifying.

And the other tragic element and I knew 2 such women where their fathers murdered their mothers in front of them. Not as uncommon as we'd like to pretend. Horrific PTSD. One suicided. I think of Whitney Houston's daughter....her father abused her mother dreadfully...XOWWW

I think it must be awful being a celeb - something I always hated the idea of even when I was a teenager. I cant think of anything worse than being surrounded by people who are just out to grab a bit of reflected glory!

Jenny: Me too. And it gets worse and worse. Nowadays there's endless celeb commentary on social media as well, much of it pretty vicious. As you say, so many people just wanting a vicarious brush with fame.

About Me

I've known my partner Jenny for over 36 years. Currently working for a voluntary organisation, I was previously a journalist, bookseller and charity worker. I enjoy the company of my partner and friends but I'm not a wild socialiser. I love walking in the country and just quietly reflecting on life. Disillusioned with living in London, Jenny and I moved to Belfast in 2000. We're still in Belfast and we think it's a fabulous city.