Posts Tagged ‘Protective Mother Heroes’

This is for all Hero Protective Mothers but especially those with empty arms and hurting hearts who are missing their children every second of every day. We understand that you are deeply hurting this weekend- Mother’s Day weekend. Know that no matter what, you ARE your children’s mother. No one -and certainly no court- can take away this God-given role in your children’s lives. Please know this in your heart. PMA INTL. celebrates you, Protective Mom, and deeply understands the unconditional love and heroic sacrifices you have made to protect your children from abuse and harm. You are modern day heroes, and PMA INTL strongly believes that you will go down in history as such. PMA INTL loves and supports you and your precious children now and forever. You are always in our hearts. Happy Mother’s Day!

Happy Mother’s Day To all Hero Protective Moms and supporters. You have our love and support.

Six Tips to Cope with Grief During the Holidays“What we have once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” – Helen Keller
The holidays can be an especially difficult time for parents who have lost their children. So many holiday routines and activities revolve around the gathering of family and friends. Yet, bereaved parents may not feel up for celebrating as usual or embracing holiday traditions that they have in the past. Instead of feeling a sense of loss over what the holidays were supposed to be, we can take this as an opportunity to recreate what they will be for our families from now on. The following are tips for enjoying your holidays in the face of grief:SimplifyMake Room for Your FeelingsCreate New TraditionsBe Generous with Others
◦ Do things that help you feel connected. Spend time with the people you love. Nurture those relationships.
◦ Give of your time, talents, and skills. Sharing can lift spirits and ease burdens.
Be Generous with Yourself
◦ Expect that you will feel sad sometimes. Or angry. Or alone. These are all appropriate feelings. Don’t think of them as being counter-productive. What they really are is an acknowledgement of the intense love you hold for your child.Read Morehttp://handtohold.org/resources/helpful-articles/six-tips-to-cope-with-grief-during-the-holidays/

This article is written by a Gloria Horsley /Psychotherapist, Grief Expert

Let Their Light Shine: Three Tips for Getting Through the Holidays After Loss

Holiday Grief Tips

Remember Grief is Physical and Emotional – When responding to the news of a loss stress hormones are released which put our body in a state of heightened awareness. Reminders and memories of the deceased can trigger these stressed neurological pathways for years. Activities such as yoga, Ti Chi, and meditation have been shown through research to calm the mind. Walking, laughing, hugging and expressing gratitude can also calm the mind and release hormones that relax the body. These activities have been shown to be as effective if not more than anti depressants.

Stress, depression and the holidays: Tips for coping
• Acknowledge your feelings. If someone close to you has recently died or you can’t be with loved ones, realize that it’s normal to feel sadness and grief. It’s OK to take time to cry or express your feelings. You can’t force yourself to be happy just because it’s the holiday season.
• Reach out. If you feel lonely or isolated, seek out community, religious or other social events. They can offer support and companionship. Volunteering your time to help others also is a good way to lift your spirits and broaden your friendships.
Be realistic. The holidays don’t have to be perfect or just like last year. As families change and grow, traditions and rituals often change as well. Choose a few to hold on to, and be open to creating new ones. For example, if your adult children can’t come to your house, find new ways to celebrate together, such as sharing pictures, emails or videos.

• Try these alternatives:
◦ Donate to a charity in someone’s name.
◦ Give homemade gifts.
◦ Start a family gift exchange.
• Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, baking, visiting friends and other activities. Plan your menus and then make your shopping list. That’ll help prevent last-minute scrambling to buy forgotten ingredients. And make sure to line up help for party prep and cleanup.
• Learn to say no. Saying yes when you should say no can leave you feeling resentful and overwhelmed. Friends and colleagues will understand if you can’t participate in every project or activity. If it’s not possible to say no when your boss asks you to work overtime, try to remove something else from your agenda to make up for the lost time.
• Don’t abandon healthy habits. Don’t let the holidays become a free-for-all. Overindulgence only adds to your stress and guilt. Try these suggestions:
◦ Have a healthy snack before holiday parties so that you don’t go overboard on sweets, cheese or drinks.
◦ Get plenty of sleep.
◦ Incorporate regular physical activity into each day.
• Take a breather. Make some time for yourself. Spending just 15 minutes alone, without distractions, may refresh you enough to handle everything you need to do. Find something that reduces stress by clearing your mind, slowing your breathing and restoring inner calm. Some options may include:
◦ Taking a walk at night and stargazing.
◦ Listening to soothing music.
◦ Getting a massage.
◦ Reading a book.
Seek professional help if you need it. Despite your best efforts, you may find yourself feeling persistently sad or anxious, plagued by physical complaints, unable to sleep, irritable and hopeless, and unable to face routine chores. If these feelings last for a while, talk to your doctor or a mental health professional.

So here it is – 64 pro-tips for coping with grief at the holidays. Why 64 things? Eh, why not 64 things? Take some. Leave some. Love some. Hate Some. Then tell us what has worked for you in holidays past, or how you plan to cope with the holidays this year. Because the holidays are tough for all of us, the least we can do are share our tips and tricks with one another to make the season just a smidge more tolerable.
• Acknowledge that the holidays will be different and they will be tough.
• Decide which traditions you want to keep.
• Decide which traditions you want to change.
• Create a new tradition in memory of your loved one.
• Decide where you want to spend the holidays – you may want to switch up the location, or it may be of comfort to keep it the same. Either way, make a conscious decision about location.
• Plan ahead and communicate with the people you will spend the holiday with in advance, to make sure everyone is in agreement about traditions and plans.
• Remember that not everyone will be grieving the same way you are grieving.
• Remember that the way others will want to spend the holiday may not match how you want to spend the holiday.
• Put out a ‘memory stocking’, ‘memory box’, or other special place where you and others can write down memories you treasure. Pick a time to read them together.
• Light a candle in your home in memory of the person you’ve lost.
• Include one of your loved one’s favorite dishes in your holiday meal.
• Be honest. Tell people what you DO want to do for the holidays and what you DON’T want to do.
• Make a donation to a charity that was important to your loved one in their name.
• Buy a gift you would have given to your loved one and donate it to a local charity.
• If you are feeling really ambitious, adopt a family in memory of your loved one. This can often be done through a church, salvation army, or good will.
• See a counselor. Maybe you’ve been putting it off. The holidays are especially tough, so this may be the time to talk to someone.

• Send a holiday card to friends of your loved one who you may regret having lost touch with.

• Journal when you are having an especially bad day.
• Skip holiday events if you are in holiday overload.
• Don’t feel guilty about skipping events if you are in holiday overload!
Don’t get trapped. When you go to holiday events, drive yourself so you can leave if it gets to be too much.

We hope some of these suggestions help you through this difficult Holiday, especially for those Hero Protective Moms without their children. Please know you are not alone. We walk beside you and are connected to you through our hearts.

Protective Moms- never forget you are Heroes.
Merry Christmas, Here’s to a better New Year.

“My ex filed contempt against me for any silly thing he could think of. The judge held me in contempt for taking 28 hours instead of the court ordered 24 hours to return an email And finally The Judge held me in contempt and sentenced me to 2 days in jail for adding 17 minutes to my ex’s commute time.”

A young adult “Hear Us Now” member’s love letter to her Protective Mom. Thank you Jennifer for your sweet contribution. Please follow the link to submit your contribution. We value your participation. We love and support you and your precious children..always. The PMA International Team

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Protective Mothers Alliance International (PMA International) is a international protective mother-driven organization that includes a global network of like-minded organizations working as a team for positive change.Protective Mothers Alliance International (PMA) is co founded by Lundy Bancroft and Janice Levinson, with Janice Levinson as Executive Director. The PMA INTL family consists of protective mother-driven advocates working together as a tight team for change.PMA INTL is working toward bringing about dramatic reform in family court for protective mothers and their children. PMA INTL. supports the efforts of protective mothers in keeping themselves and their children safe from the abuse of a former partner, and in empowering these mothers to become advocates for themselves and others. PMA INTL. has several networks/groups including but not limited to: Man Up for Moms (M.U.M), Hear us NOW!! ( H.U.N) Healing and Prayer, STOP DV by Proxy.PMA INTL's very successful blog talk radio shows had over 6 thousand listeners . PMA INTL's blog entitled: "The Guardian of Truth" continues to be an effective vehicle for education about family court abuse/ corruption. Protective Mothers Alliance INTL. has launched a gold ribbon campaign in an effort to reunite protective mothers and their children who have been separated by the family court.We invite all advocates and their allies around the globe to wear gold ribbons and to tie gold ribbons around trees, to symbolize the effort that protective mothers and their allies are making to reunite children with their moms.
Please join us in supporting this campaign. " The beautiful memories that we have of our beloved children are golden and can NEVER be erased from our hearts and minds."

A STORY OF HOPE: THE LETTER THAT SURVIVED 9/11/ BY YUKA YONEDA / INHABITAT This story was originally published on September 11, 2014 “Remarkably it survived when so much else did not,” said businessman Raviv Shtaingos about a red envelope he decided to pick up on September 11, 2001 as he fled from Lower […]