Don't Judge a Dick by Its Foreskin

The Last Prophet

The Last Temptation of Max Gold

MAX GOLD is the author of Don’t Judge a Dick by Its Foreskin and two novellas, The Last Prophet and The Last Temptation of Max Gold. His third novella, The Last Call, is due for publication later this year.

Sometime during the spring of 1980, Levi Gold was under the false impression he was in Barbara Gold’s ass, reveling in what was a good time following a booze stayed fundraiser at a local community center. Much to their joy, in the winter of 1981 a child was born.

His name was Max Gold.

By the age of twelve, Max confided to close friends and family members that he liked women. By twenty he founded a nationally-distributed comedy magazine, The Grandstand; a work which opened the door to contribute for Maxim Magazine and Swindle Quarterly.

He’s received ridiculous sums of money for “acting” in national television commercials and can be seen in one of the worst Chappelle Show sketches ever written, “Nelson Mandela’s Boot Camp,” – featured in the bonus section of Season 2.

Max currently owns Bill Hicks Bar in Toronto, Canada, and resides next door to Margaret Atwood.

Trying to convince teenagers, kids in college, people starting a career or those in their dirty-thirty's to read a book is a tough sell. It's almost as tough as trying to ask a new girlfriend to spit on her finger and gingerly massage it up your ass during a blowjob, without coming off as really kind of gay. The difference in this instance, naturally, is that by reading these books you'll actually have a good time and one of your hands won't smell like shit when you're done.

For years i've been prodded by people asking one simple and reasonable question: What are the books about? All i can say is that no one falls in love, travels to find who they are, drinks blood, evades assassins, surreptitiously leaks cables, or solves an anagram.

The books consist of a philosophical manifesto and two interwoven novellas... A trip of thoughts and ideas. Some people will love these books. Some people will not read them and hate them.

Putting close to 15 years into something, awaiting its release... Is a lot like being pregnant... In constant wait... Hoping the end product doesn't come out like a disaster you'll have to cringe at for the rest of your life. If you made it this far, i don't have to hope you'll enjoy.

Love,

Max Gold

Donate

Chicks with dicks and earning $15 an hour to push a broom is not progress. Transhumanism and Artificial Intelligence are the kinds of ideas people should be progressing towards.

If you own crypto, the odds are you didn’t casually invest the equivalent GDP of a Third World village into a technology without being able to support the creative promotion, adoption, and usage of it.

If you like the books – please donate.

If you’d like to see them (and future titles) translated into other languages – please donate.

If you’d like to see them read by people who aren’t allowed to read certain things – please donate.