When not responding to the dictate:" Will the Defendant Please Rise.." CEO and Creator of OHN;Slaus, is a comic illustrator and Social Media whore who spends his free time building legos, playing video games, drawing fantasy characters and being abused by his wife, two sons and cat.

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Hmm… wasn’t really trying to think about this since it’s been about 3 years since it happened but here it goes…

I was dating a chick I worked with. She wasn’t happy about me not being able to spend as much time with her as she wants. Also, I should mention, I was staying with my parents at the time and had the only reliable car. My dad had just gotten back from working in Afghanistan and had taken ill so I was spending more time with him.
I could tell she was growing distant. The next thing I know, she’s giving me some bullsh*t story about being in some possible legal trouble for unknowingly running guns and then I see her all hugged up with the bi*ch in the cubicle next to mine. Took everything in me not to smack both of them… or at least hire another chick to do it for me.

Odd twist is that I didn’t even know him at the time. We lived in the same apt complex on opposite ends. I opened the envelope from the back and realized it has his letter. Stuck it in his box and forgot about it. Fast forward a year later and one of his out of town grimy friends dry snitched by saying that’s now got his car down payment, by taking tests for other men in various cities.

I was supposed to stay in since I was going to his granmemaw’s early funeral the next morning. I changed my mind and headed out for a drink. When I pulled up, I saw this couple doing some heavy-azz necking, but I just shrugged, thought, “Get yours, then!”, and parked my car. It wasn’t until I was greeting friends at the door that I saw that the dude was my bf and the chick was who he told me was a “childhood friend” AKA “high school sweetheart”.

I walked up to them, tapped him on the shoulder, greeted them, and wished them a great night. Butter wouldn’t have melted on my tongue. When he turned and saw me he turned GRAY. Then they left all his family in the place and got the hell out. I was so nice that night he was looking over his shoulder for weeks.

I’ll tell you the story from 8th grade. I only have two, that’s why I remember this.

So, I was dating this guy in HS (no smart ass comments, please! lol) and everything was cool. I had this GOOD girlfriend…let’s call her Monique (because that’s her damn name) that I was mad cool with. Been to my house and everything. She knew I dated who we would call Chris (because that’s his gatdamn name too). Everything was cool. One day I was at my locker in the morning getting ready for school and my friend Fati came up to me and said “Twink…Iont know if you know but I was at Rec last night and I saw Chris in the bushes with Monique with his pants down”. Now, Rec was some nighttime activities thingie that kids went to in order to keep them out of trouble at night. I wasn’t in the Rec activity program thing because I lived too far and I had ballet and gymnastics to do. Anyway. I heard what Fati said and kept it moving like “not my man”. That was until like 4 other people came up to me all before 7:30 and told me the same thing. Once is an incident, twice is a coincidence and three times is a pattern. Monique and I had homeroom and like 3 other morning classes together. SHE MISSED ALL OF THEM. I didn’t see her until the afternoon in the hallway. I was standing by the door and she passed by. LET ME TELL YOU HOW I FLEW OUT THAT GATDAMN DOOR. I only got a few connections in because Fati and my teacher ran after me and grabbed me. I know you’re not supposed to fight the other chick but she caught it because she was my friend and she was supposed to know better. Judge me LOL.

1. because i love ya and full of peace in this new year i will leave the 8th grade dating a high school guy thing alone….for now..maybe…possibly
2. she knew….therefore i understand. i just don’t get why people go after the person who knew nothing about them.
3. the comments after their names made me laugh

was messing with this dude back in the day. he called me one night asking was I going out at the time I wasn’t planning to so I told him no. My homegirl called me soon after that and said she wanted to go out so I went. We go to the local watering hole around these parts and we are chillin’. In walks dude with some chick. Of course I decided to act a fool cause that’s what I do when i’m drinking 151 (hence why I don’t drink anymore lol). I walked up to them words were exchanged. Homegirl tried to put her hands on me but she was in my town in my hood. Friends in there were like hold up you will not touch Beth. We go outside she talkin’ smack. I politely told her every time you kiss him you are tasting my p***y. They left…yea I felt good about that LOL

First year of college I fell madly in love with this guy. I let this guy meet my family who was visiting and everything. One weekend I asked him if he was going home or staying on campus and he said staying on campus. I lived off campus so here it is Friday my day to hit the food-store. Walking thru the aisles picking up necessities … like lots of canned stuff. And I hear this familiar voice telling this girl how he can’t wait to go to her house and do it. My cousin decided to look … please keep in mind that I have one explosive temper! I walked to the front of the store and stared checking out, I was calm. He suddenly pops out the aisle like fire is on him and dashes to the register right in front of me. Meanwhile me … I am still cashing out. When my last can was paid for I was still standing there looking at the back of his head and ole girl standing next to him looks scared, I honestly do not know why. So I called his name and that idiot turned around and SOMEHOW he got hit square in the face with a can!! Funny thing a month later he asked to start dating again and he kept asking up till I transferred to Miami!