I love the Internet (pt. 6)

– Tel Aviv scientists say that within three years “medical submarines” capable of being inserted into the human body in order to kill diseased cells may be available; apparently Martin Short has already volunteered for the procedure.
– 1991 Miss USA Kelli McCarty is moving on from acting in soap operas to acting in porn, because she “enjoy(s) acting, and really enjoy(s) sex.” Nice.
– I happened upon this article in The Onion from 2001 about Dubya’s upcoming presidency. Thought it was hilarious then. Not so funny now.
– “Damnit, how the hell am I going to learn English quickly? Of course; I’ll rape someone!” My favorite part of all this? Doctors deciding this guy isn’t mentally ill. Apparently rampant stupidity isn’t considered a form of insanity these days.
– My kind of beach.
– A couple of comments here: first, when the hell did they start showing nude scenes in trailers? Second, is that the girlfriend from Pineapple Express?
– Anyone who knows me will tell you I’m a fan of the DIY scene, especially if it’s related to electronics. So this how-to that shows a way to easily add wi-fi to your Xbox 360 naturally appealed to me. Now if I could just afford a 360…
– A history of the supercomputer, from Konrad Zuse’s machines to theoretical super-powerful cloud computers.
– With the Super Bowl a week or so away, here’s a tribute to hot girls in football jerseys. Enjoy.
– Urologists report that nearly half of all men suffer from “small-penis syndrome”. The punchline? Small-penis syndrome is apparently what you get when 85% of women are satisfied with their partner’s size, but 47% of men wish their junk was bigger. Seems like good news right? Well…
– …here’s ANOTHER report proving that women are “more likely to gain sexual pleasure from a partner who is wealthy.” Finally, proof!
– This week in “Stupid government assholes with nothing better to do”, Sen. Robert Ford (D-SC) is pushing an anti-profanity bill that could give someone up to 5 years in jail and $5,000 in fines. Really? All the problems in the country, and this is what you focus on? Man, fuck that guy.
– Ever since I was 12, I’ve wanted to go to Japan. Back then, I wanted to go because of things like Dragonball Z and Gundam Wing. Now that I’m older? I want to go because of women like Hitomi Aizawa.
– Interesting: as schools reassess the importance of certain lessons in the face of time/financial constraints and burgeoning technology, cursive gets tossed to the side.
– “Only four positions were found possible without ‘mechanical assistance’. The other six needed a special elastic belt and inflatable tunnel, like an open-ended sleeping bag.” Sex in space: it’s that weird.
– Really, the title “How to blow 80 million in 6 seconds” explains it all.
– I don’t know what the hell rhythmic gymnastics is, or why it’s an Olympic sport. All I know, is this girl can work the hell out of some balls: