Selena Gomez Says Therapy Has Put Her in a 'Really, Really Healthy Place'

For Selena Gomez, mental health is of the utmost importance. That's why she canceled her Revival tour last year and checked into a treatment facility for 90 days, and why, ever since, she's been refreshingly honest about that stay and her continued reliance on regular therapy sessions.

In her cover story for the September 2017 issue of InStyle, Selena continues her crusade to destigmatize asking for help and going to therapy by opening up about her three months at the Tennessee center where she was treated for depression and anxiety. "It was the best thing that I ever could've done," she told InStyle editor Laura Brown. "I had no phone, nothing, and I was scared. But it was amazing, and I learned a lot."

Selena, 25, said her 90-day stay changed her entire perspective on life. "Everything I cared about, I stopped caring about. I came out, and it felt like, 'OK, I can only go forward,'" she said. "And there are still days. I go to therapy. I believe in that and talking about where you are. But I'm in a really, really healthy place." The "Fetish" singer also described what it was like to transition from her idyllic routine at the center back to her hectic life in the spotlight. "I was in the countryside and never did my hair; I took part in equine therapy, which is so beautiful. And it was hard, obviously. But I knew what my heart was saying, and I thought, 'OK, I think this has helped me become stronger for other people,'" she said. "When I came out, I was asked to go to the American Music Awards, and everyone around me was like, 'Do whatever makes you comfortable.' I didn't want my fans to have a negative view of taking care of yourself, so I just went in head-on, and I'll tell you, the first time stepping on that carpet was so overwhelming. I felt like my back was sweating."

At the 2016 AMAs, while accepting the award for "Best Female Artist," Selena gave a powerful speech about learning to prioritize her own mental wellness. "I had to stop because I had everything and I was absolutely broken inside. I kept it all together enough to where I would never let you down, but I kept it too much together to where I let myself down," she said. "I don't want to see your bodies on Instagram. I want to see what's in here [pointing to heart]. I'm not trying to get validation, nor do I need it anymore." She added, "If you are broken, you don't have to stay broken."

The 13 Reasons Why producer told InStyle that the intense pressure to put on a happy face and hold it all together in public is responsible for her most crippling insecurities and is what she works through in therapy "the most." "Because of social media, because of all the pressure that girls have, it's so difficult. It's good to be connected, to see things, and to get a sense of what your friends are up to. But it also allows people to think they need to look or be a certain way," she said. "Now it feels more zoomed-in — you have ugly people trying to get negative things from you, and the energy makes you feel bad about yourself. You can't help it. It's very hard to find out who you are during all that mess and pressure."

Selena has previously spoken about how, since her time at the Tennessee treatment center, she has learned to place much less stock in what she sees on social media. "It felt like I was seeing things I didn't want to see [on Instagram], like it was putting things in my head that I didn't want to care about," she said in the April 2017 issue of Vogue. "I always end up feeling like sh-t when I look at Instagram. Which is why I'm kind of under the radar, ghosting it a bit."