Most people who have a dog love their dog. Unfortunately, sometimes that love falls short of actual empathy. For example, many of the "problem dog behaviors" that people complain about aren't really your dog's fault. If someone you know keeps getting "bad dogs," chances are that the dogs aren't the source of the problem. By showing your pupper a bit of empathy by viewing recurring issues from their perspective - both physically and mentally - you will develop a deeper appreciation and love for your furry companion. And that translates into a happier dog ... and a happier you!

Dogs are so much more than most people know. Like humans, dogs produce oxytocin, which allows both species to experience love and affection. Canines also have highly evolved limbic systems - more advanced than the majority of other species and comparable to humans - which enables them to experience a range of higher emotions, including an appreciation for beauty and something akin to religious ecstacy. If you've ever caught your dog gazing at a sunset or drinking in the beauty of nature, such meditative moments are caused by flares of limbic activity.

The most important point about dogs is that they are pack members. This is one of those facts that everyone knows but hardly anyone ever considers when trying to understand canine behavior. Imagine how confusing it is for animals with a genetic predispostion towards a pack mentality when you - the de facto leader of the pack - don't exhibit pack behavior!

Your dog's socialization instincts are very strong. Pack hierarchy was established millions of years before domestication (search for "Tomarctus," "Miacid" and "Cynodictis" for more details about the ancient progenitors of modern dogs). Humans and dogs began living together starting around 30,000 BC, so there's a long history behind the "man's best friend" descriptor. Because you provide food, shelter, affection and fun, you are the de facto leader of the pack. That's why it's so vital for you to understand how this should inform your interactions with your pup! To get you started on this journey of understanding, here are three examples that frequently crop up for pet parents.

He Stares at Me Every Time I Eat!

From pitiful, longing looks to grumpy growl grumbling, dogs all over the world appear to be begging to eat the food on your plate, much to our annoyance. While he may find the smell of your food super appealing, that's not the primary take-away from this behavior. So, what is he trying to communicate? Let's put on our "pack mentality glasses." As social creatures, dogs view mealtime as a social event. As top dog, you are responsible for fairness at mealtime. But when you - and other human family members - partake, your dog feels left out. Punished even. So, in a sense, they are begging ... only they're begging for inclusion. If at mealtime, you provide them food or a healthy treat, then suddenly your dog not only feels included, they also no longer feel ostracized. Try it for yourself and see if everyone isn't happier!

She's Just Scared of Everything!

Again, dogs are sensitive social animals. Recent MRI studies show that dogs are capable of complex emotions and reading the emotional state of their caregivers. When people express anger or annoyance - whether it's at the news, a bad day at work or problems with a spouse or partner - dogs are highly attuned to that. And, if on top of all of that, you're also frustrated with your pup's skittishness or anxiety, well obviously that will likely only exacerbate these very same issues and problem behaviors you wish would go away. Whether you realize it or not, as alpha, you're setting the tone for everyone else in your pack (family, same difference). If you're quick to snap, your dogs will be anxious. If you are tolerant, patient and calm, your dogs will be less anxious. See? Dog logic is not so difficult. For the wellbeing of your entire family, be careful about the emotions you project.

He Keeps Chewing Up My Shoes!

This one is so common, it's hard to find someone who hasn't experienced the heartbreak of losing a favorite pair of shoes. Sadly, many feel their dog was being vindictive and dole out a harsh punishment. And that's not good for the pack. First of all, canine memory works differently than ours. Shaking a slobbery, mangled shoe at your pupper is really going to baffle them, especially if it's been more than 20 minutes since it was destroyed. So, what are dogs trying to tell you when they chew up your shoes? This question is answered best with another question: what is the last thing you do before you leave the house for an extended period of time? You put on your shoes, right! Your dog believes - with evidence gathered literally every day - that destroying your shoes will prevent you from leaving the house (i.e., the pack). She's really not being a jerk, she's just trying to keep you where you belong ... with her! To avoid this happening, simply protect your footwear with a dog gate. Or better yet, take your dog with you when you leave!

There you have it. Three simple examples of "problem behavior" that can be understood in a completely new way that's more charitable to your dog. Just remember that you're the leader here and your dog looks to you (often lovingly) for reassurance, consideration and safety.

We're very interested to know if this article leads you to reconsider some aspect of your dog's behavior, so please let us know your thoughts in the comment section below!

Darlene Schierland

7/29/2018 9:31:22 AM |

Can you post an article of why a pup may pee in their cage while you are at work? I know someone who has a great dane pup who they feel is anxious and does this. I posted your last article on FB & would like to share an article about this behavior . They are not into alot of reading or watching any videos on how to help this issue, but maybe a short article that I can post on Facebook would get them thinking in the right direction. Thank You.

Norma Clack

7/29/2018 3:42:06 PM |

Oh my - these totally describe my 3-month old puppy! I think what you covered here - especially being more aware of the pack mentality and how to view things that way will be very helpful for us. Thank you!

Debbie Damesworth

7/30/2018 8:26:37 AM |

Great info I had not thought about. What about cats and their behavior?

Deb Schondel

7/30/2018 10:38:49 AM |

We picked up our Schnauzer puppies at 12 weeks old, they were litter box trained, when we go home, they began playing the litter box and putting their toys in there, we reduced the size but that didn't help, we then tried a pee pad in a frame, now they are shredding the pee pads. I'm very frustrated as I have to be gone 9-10 hours a day for work. Any suggestions?

Kathie Hodgkinson

8/13/2018 6:18:04 PM |

Our Maltese dog who will be three October second barks at people any where she is house,walking , car etc. What can be done to help her become better with this bad habit??? We are at our wits end. Never was able to socialize her when we got her it was a cold winter and just didn't get out. Thank you. We are wondering if a course is available for traing her to stop this barking. Kathie

DMattox

8/16/2018 9:55:36 AM |

That does sound challenging. We have two suggestions. One, when you take her for walks, bring along a long-handled kitchen spoon with the end covered in a coating of peanut butter (but, obviously not if your dog has a nut allergy, but that's highly unlikely). Whenever her attention strays from you, but before she starts acting out, hold the spoon near her muzzle. Retraining her focus on you and not elements in the environment. Second, call your local dog training center. Explain the problem and they'll be able to advise you based on numerous factors. Socialization classes go into a good bit of detail about exercises you can do to make her more social.Best of luck to you!

Becky Buckman

10/2/2018 9:35:57 PM |

Someone just asked me today about walking their dog and it being distracted. I love the long handle spoon reply. I am forwarding this blog. Thanks