Dec 31, 2012

Sick, sexually!

The heinous act by the six shameless rapists has stuck the country alarmingly in the later part of the December this year. In a moving bus, beating up a man, dragging his female friend to the back seat of the bus, amidst the country capital, sexually and physically assaulting her in such a way that cannot be written so easily here, is all done by the citizens of this country, our very own.

Enough has been written in national news papers and telecasted on national television channels since fortnight on this incident. Hence I take no time in jumping to the later part of this post.

Is it for the first time that we are witnessing the tsunami of grief, thrashing anger, candle light vigils, fearless protests and back-firing Indian youth in the centre of the national capital? Actually no, but yes in terms of the way all this has happened and the intensity that has been shown this time round across the nation and globe! People have been connected not by the leaders but by the leading social-networking sites. Government having no clue about the upcoming protests has handled the situation less convincingly but the protestants themselves have been convincing enough that sooner it has become contagious across the country’s main cities. Leading ladies from various Indian cities have come out on to roads and lead the rallies, whereas some others have spoken for every victim so far on the TV channels. Men, have taken their part too and some men especially have become so expressive and emotional that they have been sorry for being men! Well, man, no need to be sorry that you are a man. Just be the man a woman wants tohave than the one whom she has to have. That itself is more than respecting a woman.

One in around six hundred rape cases of the year (only the ones which could enter the count) has finally come under the surveillance and seen the treatment. I would appreciate every effort that the guys have put in starting from air flowing the victim to Singapore, getting back the dead woman in a charted flight, receiving the dead body early in the airport after half an hour’s wait, cremating her body without notice to the masses, and now finally offering her family a job in state government along with up to rupees thirty five lakhs in cash. That’s enough effort but fell just short from saving the girl’s life. Not that all that is done in this case is incorrect or insufficient but the question is if such similar treatment will be shown in all such cases or if some harsh treatment will be given to the culprits, who are sick mentally and sexually. I think the government is working hard to frame it out well, at least for now to get the masses back to work from holding the placards and pushing away the slogans. Hope some stricter laws get enforced henceforth.

Law can change the way the victim feels about the incident but it can hardly gives her chance to recover back to the normalcy, which probably she can never do in her life time. One rape victim spoke on a TV channels who said, when in the morning you are confident in handling out the people around you, at night you have to be alone in the darkness where you feel like having sixteen foreign hands scrolling around you, you alone have to pass the time then. That one statement has spoken volumes to me that the normalcy is gone too along with the rest that goes in vain after one such incident.

He who commits the accident is punished and he who is met with the accident is free from law. But in this special accident case, who commits this might undergo the punishment as per the sections of the law books, does not matter after how long or for how long, but the one who is the victim of this type of accident is put into punishment cell from the next moment and for all of her life, perhaps. Irony or destiny! But she has to undergo this.

And, why?

All because of the way we, the society, see the incident. You can legally ditch the person whom you have married but you cannot escape the weird looks when a stranger, although only for those moments, checks you through. Getting raped is a big crime? And raping someone, an unknown one, an innocent one, is not such a crime that the youth and women welfare associations have to come on roads to ensure the punishment such people deserve! There is no wrong that one has done when she is raped. At least, it’s not a greater misfortune than having raped someone. Women have to carry their own fighting spirit along with them all the time. One may not escape it completely but combating is important too. Today I read that henceforth woman has every right to kill the person who is attacking her. I thought, if women have been waiting for this rule to pass that they can kill him. Had it been possible everyone would have.

This time round, many big people have shouted on punishing the culprits. Would they have done the same had the culprits been from rich, politician or celebrity families? Years back when in Andhra Pradesh, one movie actress got brutally gang raped and murdered by a ‘big’ family’s son and his friends, no one spoke for the lady. Why now? Is it just because this time round the culprits are unknown vibrant from the capital, and that the ‘big’ ones have no impact on their careers by doing so? May be or may not be, but one thing is for sure. Not every time a rape occurs the reaction is same or even comparable. Some acquire the attentions through the none other than ‘media’. I appreciate media’s work in this regard. But some other victims cry in dark, stay in mood swings all over their lives thinking about the same moments.

Good that the girl’s identity this time round has been kept secret. People have called her “Nirbhaya’ or ‘Damini’, symbolizing her traits that she showed after the incident. Brave girl has fought for her life throughout her tenure in her last days. Her answers to the questions of police in writing are said to be the crucial ones. When the whole nation can speak for her, her last written words are still the major companions of her to see the end of the culprits.

Capital punishment is of course not the option I’m looking for, as far as I’m concerned, seriously. One has to target the long term changes in the way the society thinks. If guys cannot take the short frocks girls wear and if for now they have to be avoided or have to be conscious, a girls has to be. I’m not denying the fact that every girl has her own rights about her own body but in the present scenario being in everyone’s own limits shall be the best option to choose. There is an argument that sarees, the part and parcel of Indian culture, too can cause the inevitably evil. But somehow I too feel conservative on this topic. The Indian culture is mixed up with every other culture of the world now. There is a huge transition that’s going on and there is no loss in being careful, little more careful, in the way one make herself appear.

If the fear of death punishment can alone set the things straight, there should not have been any murderers. But they are there. If long term push into jail can stop a man from being bad to a woman, there should not have been any cases found in other countries of the world where rape is taken as a serious crime. All that matters is the way a man’s mind thinks, the way it wants or the way it gets probed to do the worst at times. Lack of education on sex, respecting woman, brought up and friends’ circle come out to be the main ones behind a man’s such cruelty. I feel, one generation has to suffer and that we are in suffering mode now. If we really want our next generations to be safe from all such disheartening incidents, children of this generation shall be targeted for the best possible brought up. In schools, sex education must be the part of syllabus. Respecting girls and woman shall be incepted into them by the women at home, it could the mother or it could be the sister. Boys shall be observed closely in the regards of their actions towards the other gender. Education itself is not in good reach in India for the millions of people and proper sex education might appear very far away in this scenario. But we neither have option, nor the government too. Punishment could be helpful at this stage but to achieve the long term goal ‘education to everyone’ must be revolutionized and along with that the other but important ‘human values’ too.

We can also think of having special police personal to solve the women cases similar to the special courts and the fast tract schemes. Like the way NSGs are created a special security force can be created and I hope I’m not asking for too much. In a way, somewhere in corner of my mind, asking for this makes me feel weak as if women are really weak. May be, we are, for now.

Chemical castration is being talked about too. But, just in case, if this particular thing reverse swings and a man changes from having less sexual activity to have physiological disorders, that might prove further worst to the country and society. In all the countries wherever it’s in practice as on date, those countries are small ones and are with controllable population. But in India, if such thing comes into practice, there could be many people who can fool out the rules by all means. But nothing concrete can be said now, at the moment. Let’s hope for the best, a better India, for women.

1 comment:

You have rightly pointed out that apart from strict laws, speedy disposal of cases and specially trained force to handle these cases, it is imperative that mindset of men is changed for better. And that is possible only when gender discrimination is rooted out. That is possible to a great extent when women themselves take this task and do not discriminate between son and daughter. It is unfortunate that elder women who may have resented such bias in their younger days become part of society favouring male child. That mindset of women needs to change first.

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