This blog is my place to vent and share resources with other parents of children of trauma. I try to be open and honest about my feelings in order to help others know they are not alone. Therapeutic parenting of adopted teenagers with RAD and other severe mental illnesses and issues (plus "neurotypical" teens) , is not easy, and there are time when I say what I feel... at the moment. We're all human!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

We win?

Kitty got home from the hospital Monday evening. The hospital increased her Ser*quel (which I’ve been told in higher doses is a mood stabilizer in addition to being an antipsychotic and sleep aide) from 100mg to 200mg (increased by her psychiatrist on Wednesday to 250mg). They kept the mood stabilizer, Tril*ptal at 1800mg and the Wellb*trin at 150mg. All but the Trileptal are VERY low doses. At the hospital Kitty was her usual “fine” self so the hospital declined to put her back on the mood stabilizer Lam*ctal (her regular pdoc doesn’t prescribe it).

She came down with a cold/allergies on Tuesday morning, but made it through most of the school day until her IEP meeting at 2:45pm anyway. One of her teachers let me I thought she was upset when she had her head down for most of it, but found out afterward that it was because she didn’t feel good.

This Annual IEP meeting was frustrating. The school adamantly maintained they would not place Kitty in an alternative education environment and denied the recommendation for homebound from the psychiatrist, even though the pdoc submitted their completed recommendation form as requested. They insisted that what they were doing was working, despite the fact that she was only in school one day before leaving to go back to the hospital this time, and only 2 days in school before being hospitalized last time. She went from being an A/B student to failing all but Teen Leadership.

We discussed the Crisis Plan trying to get everyone to agree on how to best help Kitty deal with her anxiety, and I brought in the rough draft of the level system with concrete examples, since Kitty’s definition of a 6 on a scale of 1 to 10, sounds more like an 8 or 9 to me.

The school was just telling us we’d run out of time and were going to have to continue the ARD on January 9th (which wasn't going to work, considering we hadn’t even decided what electives she’d be taking for the classes that end at the end of the semester…) when someone came back into the room after receiving a text stating that we’d filed Due Process so everything came to a screeching halt.

Filing Due Process means that everything has to stop and that all we’d discussed for the last 1 ½ hours didn’t count, but in reality it didn’t matter because nothing useful had been addressed anyway. Stinks for Kitty because it meant nothing would change on being able to call home when she was stressed (which the school hasn’t allowed since the last IEP meeting).

They did determine that the Anxiety Levels weren't technically related to the IEP so Kitty could work on them with her case manager, using my chart as a jumping off point.

The next day I got a call from our professional advocate. After many CYA threats and accusations of the advocate’s bad behavior (unfounded), the school district informed the advocate they’d approved the special school for Kitty. The school district’s attorney said if we hadn’t filed due process on the day of the ARD, we would have found out that they’d approved the special school… ummmm, NO THEY DIDN’T! Apparently the school district’s attorney didn’t realize we’d held the ARD.

So we’ll have an IEP Meeting sometime next week, and Kitty will go to the special school starting next semester. She made it through school all week (except Wednesday. I kept her home and took her to psychiatrist and doctor) although she had a tough time. The pdoc didn’t seem to care that they didn’t accept her recommendation for homebound. She thinks Kitty should be in RTC so it doesn’t really matter what’s going on in school.

Next week is finals week and we still have no idea how the school is going to handle that. To say she’s unprepared is an understatement. She hasn’t been to class consistently in months.

About Me

I'm the admin for a large, international support group on Face Book called Parenting Attachment Challenged Children. I have a Masters degree in Social Work, a bachelors in Psychology with a focus on child abuse and neglect, and over 30 years of experience working with children and families, in particular those with special needs
Hubby and I adopted special needs teenage siblings in 2008 - a son, (Bear, age 24) and daughter, (Kitty, age 22). Both are diagnosed with RAD, Bipolar Disorder, ADHD, Borderline Personality Disorder, C-PTSD, brain injuries... and many other diagnoses. We also have two younger bio children, a daughter, (Bob - see the post "What about Bob" if you're dying to know how she got her nickname -age 20) and a son, (Ponito, 18).
I love to help, and I hope my blog provides resources and support for parents struggling with children with attachment and trauma challenges.

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Books, Methods, and Resources Review

BOOKS, METHODS, AND RESOURCES REVIEW

This is a "living anecdotal document" reviewing books and methods specific to the many issues in parenting children of trauma that I have come across over the years. I share it with you, because I wish I'd been able to find resources when we started this process. Please let me know if you have any suggestions, comments, or additions!**********************************INTRODUCTION - Books, Methods, and Resources Review