February 6, 2010

I had a strange dream last night:

I was walking through a semi-dingy area of a building, filled with people dressed in rags. There were a great many people there, all gathered and excited to see Barack Obama. He arrived on the scene and everybody went into a frenzy of applause and cheers for some reason. Everything went black.

When i could see again, i was walking with Obama, drinking a giant 7-11 slurpee. We went into the bathroom to take a whiz and i finished first because i am an over-achiever. A crazed looking man burst forth from the stall with a knife in hand and lunged for the President. I jumped in his way, grabbing his knife but also crashing into Barack, knocking him to the floor while he was peeing. Awkward. The man was arrested (though not by the police, he instead just disappeared) and i was awarded a high honor for protecting the President. He invited me to the White House later that day.

When i arrived, i was rushed to the Oval Office and told to wait for the President. I stood in front of the desk, wondering if there were the hidden parts on it that i saw in “National Treasure 2”. Obama showed up behind me and said i would be given a special tour today, one that nobody has ever been on. At first it weirded me out, but he explained, saying that we were going to the underground section of the White House–the part that was built in the late 1700’s.

We arrived in a stone chamber that served as a library. It was filled with ancient looking books and some of the expensive books i have on my bookshelf. I got excited and told Obama that i had some of the same books and he just chuckled. Paying more attention to this room, it looked like it had been looted over the last century–a lot of books were missing but that didn’t stop me from running from one shelf to another. There were books that had been written during the times of ancient Rome, books on medicine from the 1500’s and all kinds of antique manuscripts.

I asked if i could read one and the President said i could take one home with me. My head almost exploded. I found a 3 volume set about Julius Caesar that i really wanted but i was told i could only have one. I became furious and scolded the President. I warned him about Rome’s history and how it so closely paralleled our own country’s-including the era that immediately preceded its downfall

He told me it was time to leave; i didn’t take a book since i could not have that 3 volume set. We walked through a dank network of tunnel systems, torch in hand and arrived in another room that looked worn-out. The original national flag (the one sewn by Betsy Ross according to American tradition) was hung on a wall in front of me. The president pointed to it and told me to go up to it. As i approached, i felt the ground beneath me start to quake. Woke up.

July 10, 2009

I had a strange dream last night:

Touring the Apple store and the lights kept flickering. After a few minutes i left. Walking to my car, i looked to my left and my friend Angie was walking to her car as well. I called out to her and she came over. My car turned into a bed and both of us sat on it. After talking for maybe 10 minutes we started to wrestle and flirt. Things became a bit more serious and we started touching, biting, etc. As fun as it was, she had a boyfriend so i stopped things there. Everything went black.

When i could see again, i noticed that i was in a house set in a wooded area. George W. Bush arrived and went right to the bathroom, which stuck out a bit from the main wall. I could hear the noise of some sort of political event going on in the backyard. Bush looked up at the ceiling and, chuckling, took a hammer and repeatedly slammed it into the ceiling, breaking it open. Although i knew the ceiling was weak to begin with, i was pissed off at him for breaking it open and said to him, “Looks like we should go for another stimulus bill to get that fixed.” He became very serious and took offense to my smart-ass comment and walked out of the bathroom. I followed him and told him that it was just a joke but he did not change his attitude. He went into another room and stayed in there while i waited outside.

His father and Bill Clinton appeared down the hallway and walked into the room to get him out. We all went outside where Obama and his wife were giving a speech. I called him out but he ignored me. Instead, everyone listening to him turned on me, telling me to shut up. I became angry at that and over the crowd’s stupidity as they hung on his every word. “Fuck them” i thought, “they will find out on their own that he is full of shit”.

I left the backyard and went out front to hang out by myself and then to the side, along a row of trees. I watched the events in the backyard from there, still irritated at those stupid people who seemed to foam at the mouth every time Obama spoke. I looked back to the front yard and there was a stranger sitting in a lawn chair, staring at me. Kinda creepy. I went out back again. I woke up.