Keeping up with the Kardashians

Oh Kendall Kardashian Jenner! Please stop following in your older sisters’ footsteps. Just do your modeling thing, and stop using Twitter as a vehicle to flaunt yourself. Oh well. I guess you do come by it naturally. And speaking of naturally, Kendall recently posted a picture of herself on Twitter wearing a string bikini with the caption “all natural.” I’m assuming she’s referring to plastic surgery or photoshop. One would hope she hasn’t had any plastic surgery, given she’s only sixteen. However, if I’ve learned anything, it’s don’t put anything past those Kardashians Jenners! The aspiring model recently told E!, “I want to be the next Gisele Bündchen. Everything she does, who she is, what she’s done, she’s just amazing.” Good gracious.

Of course, Kendall’s big sister Kim Kardsahian is known for her fashion highs and lows (and really lows). Always dressed for a runway show (although it sometimes looks like a Project Runway rejects show), she is complimented and criticized for her wardrobe choices at every turn. New York Magazine recently did an entire photo shoot and spread on Kimmie and why she will never be the person that high fashion and couture designers want wearing their clothes. Something tells me she’s going to wear them anyway. Ouch. It’s shocking to me that Anna Wintour would think that someone whose career was jump started by a toilet themed sex tape wasn’t worthy of being a fashion icon.

Ahhh… Kardashians! It must suck when every person of importance or A List magnitude hates you. Oh, well – they can just soldier on pimping their wares and products that I suppose someone, somewhere maybe buys. I mean someone is buying this right?

Anyway, exciting times in K-Kountry! Kourtney Kardashian recently took to her website to announce that the Kardashian Kollection is making its international debut. That’s right they’re taking their polyester, bedazzled, besquined, leopard print harem pants and schmattas to the UK. God save well – everyone! Does the Queen know about this great injustice?

Oh Kardashians. Y’all are so funny. Poor Bruce Jenner is trying to regain relevance by reminding us that he’s not just married to pimp master Kris, he’s also a former Olympian. It’s almost too late for that reminder, but I guess he has the Olympic fanfare to help his cause. Bless his heart.

The former decathlete has been covering the games, and he recently spoke with Access Hollywood about his time in Olympic Village back in the day. Bruce brags, “I was a stud! Let me tell you, I was doing it! Just kicking butt all day long, taking no prisoners.” So basically the exact opposite of how he is now.

Oh the curse of the Kardumphries. Ever since Kim Kardsahian said “I do” to basketballer Kris Humphries in a million dollar E! sponsored wedding, the same property has seen a lull in wedding wannabees. Are you surprised?

Who would line up to wed at a place where the most famous wedding that took place there ended after less than three months? Maybe I would…if the venue paid me to do so, but I’m desperate. Duh.

Well, we all knew it was only a matter of time before the newest Kardashian was pimped out to the masses. And Penelope Scotland Disick has arrived! Kourtney Kardashian introduced her newest spawn via the cover of Us Weekly where the Keeping Up With The Kardashians star talked her family’s newest addition and how Mason is treating the roll of big brother.

“Nothing could prepare me for how hard I fell in love with her,” Kourtney shared. The bigger question is whether or not dad, Scott Disick has gotten his act together yet. And the answer is no – Kourtney tells the mag he hasn’t changed a diaper yet because he’s afraid. Uh… seriously?

While his sisters continue to branch out in reality television, it seems that Rob Kardashian has bigger dreams than just doing unscripted (cough cough) television for the rest of his days. Rob is following in his father’s footsteps and starts law school this fall!

The sock entrepreneur and former DWTS contestant shared with his Twitter followers: “Going to Law School very soon and so excited and can’t wait! School just never ends for me! #UniversityofSouthernCal #Trojans #FightOn.”

Mama Kardashian, aka Kris Jenner must’ve had one too many margaritas at dinner with Nicole Richie and Khloe Kardashian, as she got a little..um..spicy? She took to Twitter to share the above photo, captioned with ‘Twitter or Titter??’.

Give us your best shot at captioning Kris’ saucy photo, as we’re rendered speechless over this one.

Kim Kardsahian of former sex tape fame is always claiming she’s so embarrassed by the tape while simultaneously admitting it’s made her famous. Well now that the Keeping Up With The Kardashians star is in a very public – and very paparazzi-ized -relationship with Kanye West, rumors are the couple wants to share everything – and I mean EVERYTHING with the media!

According to Star Magazine (via their print edition), Kanye is very proud of his girlfriend’s infamous ass-sets and is always looking to get them featured.

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Kanye “always tells Kim that she should showcase her amazing body whenever possible,” a friend of the couple’s reveals. So much so that HE is interested in capturing their sexytimes for all the world to see by making a sex tape! He “swears that their filmed fornication will be art, not porn.” I guess he is sort of a narcissist!

Kim is reportedly “horrified” by the idea and insists she’s “still trying to live down” her first on-film indiscretion! Gossip Cop is refuting the story, claiming a source close to the couple calls the rumor “stupid.” I wouldn’t be surprised if they staged a series of nude photos in the name of art, though!