All sorts of arm-locking wrongness in this pic causes lemurs to karate-chop a kitten in the nads.

In a strange twist of irony, those lemurs karate-chopped the same kitten I once slapped and bought an ice-cream cone. But that’s a story for another time.

HCwDB of the Week Finalist #3: The Earglasm Every great HCwDB pic features a form of douchal innovation. Thomas Edison-like inspiration of ballcrust.

Earglasm has it all. Ears. Sunglasses. Mandana.

Pouty Minx stoically smoking a cig by the beach.

Hers is a neck I would nuzzle.

His is a spikey-fro I would mock.

A third worthy entry in the Weekly, and with artistic composition to boot.

And by boot, I mean his ass. Not that Das Boot film with the Germans in the submarine.

Although that film did kick ass. As did Das Booty Call, starring Tommy Davidson and Udo Kier.

Last week also featured the meltdowns of poor Colt, whose bravado and arrogance quickly collapsed under a heap of really hilarious grammar. Lets toss that fish back in the sea and let it go get another neck tattoo.

Eagle-eyed ‘bag hunters like Wheezer correctly tagged Don’t Mess with the Poohan as HCwDB of the Week winner from last January Sir Sucks-a-Lot. Sucks.A.L. is campaigning for most amorphous douchebag of 2009, and, with his latest entry, is a strong write-in contender for HCwDB of the Year.