Friday, December 07, 2007

I generally like the whole Hallmark ornament thing; in fact, I have a sweet X-Wing fighter ornament that plugs right into the light strand so the x-wing's engines light up red (and in my case, blink off and on). By the way, my tree is already up this year, and the x-wing is working great.
But if anyone ever got this ESPN SportsCenter ornament for me, I'd be pissed off, and it would be up on ebay immediately:

Channel his inner sports guy with this very clever TV ornament tuned to ESPN's SportsCenter. When he presses the button, the screen lights up, and he'll hear the sweet strains of the SportsCenter theme song.

I happened to be at a Hallmark Gold Crown store the other day and went in to check this puppy out. For $15, you get a plastic ornament that looks like a flat screen, and then when you push the button on the side, the translucent "screen" is backlit and the SportsCenter theme plays in an obnoxious tinny sound. Not exactly as it is described on the product page, which used words like "clever" and "sweet" rather than "annoying" and "cacophonous."

Somewhere, ESPN's licensing division thinks it is clever and sweet. It is not.