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February 19, 2013

Big

I was looking through my 2012 year and then I saw these. They were hidden in a little dark file called 'Big'. I laughed really hard. Truly, the biggest time in my life and the most wonderful little blessing on the inside. My family took these for me when I graduated. I was on the verge of due, quite literally.

Looking back I can hear the honour song playing as the opening ceremonies began and my little Winston was just kicking away. I cried. A long and fun journey of education. I love to learn and I know I will always be a learner. Particularly, when it comes to this life. I am learning everyday to be a mom. I am not good at it. But this week I made a goal to simply enjoy it. Especially to not feel bad for all things I can't do or want to do, with the little amount of time it feels like I have. I am realizing everyday that as much as I want to do every thing possible sometimes, I just need to sit back and stare at the loads of clean laundry staring right back at me.

This is my happiness. I am ok that tomorrow {or maybe even the next day} the laundry will be folded. I am incredibly happy that I have a husbuddy who comes homes 10:00 in the night from working so hard for us. Because I have moments of sweet moments of joy seeing him walk through that door that it brings a little tear of joy. I miss him even though we may spend our lunches together. He is my best friend and I miss him all the time. I love my little winston on my back helping me do the laundry and his little hands grabbing at my bun and tugging on my hair. All this love and peace {thanks to yoga and much needed reflection of my testimony} has increased my energy ten-fold. I love my baby. I very much love my husbuddy. I am so grateful that they love me.