Wednesday, January 11, 2012

REALLY!

I find myself saying REALLY, not sure to whom, I’m sure no one around me knows either. I am a wife – REALLY; I am a mom to 6 kid’s – REALLY; I graduated from high school when I was 9 months old – REALLY; and yes, I was born in the 60’s when strobe lights, Jimi Hendix and Janis Joplin were my parents favorite music, so therefore I am a real classic rocker –REALLY.

REALLY, I remember when it became a popular one word sentence a few years ago I hated it. Didn’t make much sense to me then, but it sure does now!

I am now the mom of 2 young adults 21 & 20, 2 teenagers 17 & 18 – all boys, a beautiful Princess 9 and an angel who got his wings 10 years ago. REALLY.

I have been married for 23yrs and REALLY he is not a figment of my imagination like my relatives think. He does exist. We assumed when we married that we would not have children, I could not have any and he did not want any.

After a few years we knew our initial decision was not a wise one. So, we opted to do foster care. An amazing challenge that I realized early on I had a gift for. REALLY.

We had some beautiful children, most were newborns and toddlers. I had the knack for being able to tolerate a baby with many issues and working with the families. I would like to feel like I made an impact on their lives like they did mine. 99% of them were prenatally exposed to AOD – a term that has taken on a life of its own – Alcohol and Other Drugs.

Methamphetamine seemed to be the drug of choice, with Marijuana and tobacco. But, also reported alcohol as a substance of choice – but is not testable. In getting to know most of the parents I worked with most were dual addicts.

Very few had much support and also have mental health issues. Through our choice to be foster parents we also adopted our six. REALLY. Not really a big number for most who adopt, I know many who have adopted ten, twelve. REALLY.

I decided to start sharing our journey because so many people have said I should write a book or do reality tv, REALLY.

I decided on this format simply because I have ADHD – can’t sit long, really comes in handy with my children and I don’t spend a lot of time at home. REALLY.

I work part-time and volunteer in our community. You may have guessed, my children have disabilities. This is something we have chosen not dwell on because it is only a part of who they are.

They have amazing insight about things most people don’t take the time notice but can spend hours on – some call it perseveration, they feel things and smell things most don’t – some call it Sensory Integration Disorder, they can be fine one minute and screaming at the top of their lungs the next – some see that as a meltdown I see it all as language. REALLY.

My children have speech, just not always capable of communicating. Because of their disabilities I find myself saying “REALLY!” when they do something for the bazillionth time and I know they will do it a bazillion times more. REALLY. Some call it life in the FASD LANE, I just call it life. REALLY.