"humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time He may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you." 1 peter 5:6

we talk a lot about the in-between here. transitions rule our 20somethings, and we wrestle between the tension of what we thought would be and what actually is. the teenage versions of ourselves had high expectations, and most of us woke up this morning with some longing yet unmet. marriage. kids. a world-changing career that actually covers the bills. that degree you never finished. a home of your own.

the longing wouldn't be so bad if we could see the other side, but deep down, we're afraid that what we're waiting for may never come. it's not just the passing of time that scares us. it's the whisper we hear late at night, when all else is quiet.

what if i never meet someone? what if i'm stuck in this job forever? what if i never get pregnant?

the doubts walk hand in hand with worry, and pretty soon, anxiety steals any hope of sleep.

sometimes, well-intentioned people try to meet us in the uncertainty. they give us coffee mugs and journals and little plaques with jeremiah 29:11 plastered across the front, and for a moment, we feel a little stronger. God has a plan. God has a plan. God has a plan. we repeat the verse and hope it sticks, never admitting that inside, doubt rages on. the what-ifs never quit.

maybe it's because, no matter how hard we try to make it one, God's word is not a band-aid. we can't just pick a line, slap it over a gaping wound and call it good. His word is true and powerful, but it was not given to us as a quick fix or some spiritual version of webmd, a place we only look when we feel sick and need a specific cure. it is the story of the living God, loving and redeeming His fallen people, told to us so we may draw nearer to Him.

and so i see it in 1 peter 5, when He shows us the answer to anxiety isn't only in plans and purposes but in our humility beneath the same mighty hand that led the israelites out of slavery and into the promised land. the truth is this: our worry won't bow down so long as our death grip on control continues, no matter how many bumper sticker scriptures we read. it won't bow to our timelines or manipulations or solutions. it won't bow to late nights spent analyzing every unspoken word or the same thoughts wearing the same path through our tired minds.

worry bows only to One, and we have to bow to Him first.

peace comes in our humility, when the white flag waves and we cry from bended knee not my will but Yours. it comes when realize we cannot fix, mend, solve, or protect a single thing on our own and finally run toward the God who not only can, but does.