Wednesday, May 25, 2005

So, on Saturday, I watched my tape of Friday night's Eurovision semi final, and out of the 25 performances, I liked FOUR. And they were these:

MOLDOVA[do you SEE the granny with the drum? The song is ABOUT her and how she bangs a drum. Genius.]

NORWAY[look, he’s attached an orange scarf to his mic stand and he’s waving it around. POLITICAL.]

SWITZERLAND[I cannot get this song out of my head. "Cool vibes, why don't you kill me" indeed. DEEP.]

ICELAND[this one was just really really good. I wasn't laughing or enjoying it 'ironically'. It was just a great thing.]

Of those four, only three made it through to the final, so can I just take this opportunity to belatedly say, ICELAND. ROBBED.

I only caught the closing stages of the final on Sunday night, and I am highly incensed that none of my remaining three won. TRAVESTY. Also, I think I need to repeat: ICELAND. ROBBED.

Anyways, congratulations to the Australian Voting Public. Angela is gone. Thank you for that. I disliked her intensely. She was one of those latch on/lash out people. Incredibly irritating. And seemingly without any sense of what a ghastly loser no friends she is. So I’m glad she’s out of our lives forever. What? She isn’t? Ah yes, could people please refrain from asking her opinion on things. It makes her think we value it. Angela, we don’t. Please go away. You are exhaustingly annoying.

So, Australian Voting Public, next week you are going to get rid of Hotdogs, aren’t you? Because, as the mostly excellent Geneva says, “HE’S TEDIOUS.” Quite right, Geneva. And if I might just add, he is also a major TOOL. So, you know what to do.

Anyway, now it’s time to yell CUNT CUNT CUNT in the direction of Warren Entsch;

"If we start folding here, then suddenly we'll find there'll be literally thousands - hundreds and hundreds - of kids ending up in a similar situation because their parents see it as a way out," he said.

God, I hate A LOT, don't I? But, you know, troubling times in the world and all that. So many foul people. However, luckily, the Radar release date has passed, so only the small matter of air freight is now separating me from this darling thing: