(Part II) The days after April 11 as I lived them

When we came back home we saw on the news many people from the Chavez government were chased and detained by the police in the middle of people screaming "Asesino! Asesino!" (Killer). We heard the "Asesino" scream many times during those days and afterwards. We didn't smiled or join the screams as we were watching them on TV; I didn't presence any of those events on the streets, none of them took place near by home.We felt anger, about that people that were hiding their faces with looks of fear, we had for certain that they were killers, we knew they were responsible of the events of just some hours before. But, I couldn't feel the difference between justice and revenge. It was the war. And I had to belong to one of the sides. But the madness was in both sides. Today I'm ashamed of that behavior the opposition had and I can't run off the responsibility saying that "I wasn't there" because I don't know how my acting’s would have been if I had the opportunity of being there. Hence, that doesn't take any less guilt off the government because of the massacre of April 11, 2002.On the night of April 12, 2002; my parents invited a few uncles to dinner and celebrate that Chavez wasn't the president anymore, or maybe just talk about what was happening and dry out a little bit all the confusion that filled the environment. They discussed the "Decreto Carmona" and fall into the immediately logical conclusion: "This is not democracy, this is a government "de facto"". The promise was a dictatorship, this time from the right, but a dictatorship none the less. That was not a secret. "There’s no other way to fix things around here" - One relative say, while the rest of the people at the table were worried about it. "I don't know what happened, I don't know if this is democracy or not, but I do know now that the inversions will come like rice... Finally! So cheers for the government "de facto"!" - An uncle screamed, raising a glass of red wine. And the rest joined him: “For this government de facto!”.If the night of April 11 was the night of the rumors, the afternoon and the night of April 12, and all day of April 13 were the explosion of rumors. And only a very few real news about the recent events: more killings, only United States and don't remember who else recognized the new government. The rest, we just had the phone and the stories. According to those stories Chavez went to many places those hours. On the afternoon of April 13 we heard the worse rumor of all "Chavez is going back to power". But "How?" - We asked to ourselves. And that night we saw a smiling Chavez, hugging some ministers, and coming out to the "people's balcony" to give a speech to a red crowd. It was over, we never knew if this was a coup, a dream, a world of confusion, a swindle or a combination of all that. We just turned off the TV. I hide in my sheets and cried in silence. I knew the rest of my family was crying as well in their beds.