You're Not For Everybody. Be You and Move On.

Not too long ago I was with a group of friends and associates. We were discussing people making it in their craft, many of which online. A friend of mine came up, though nobody in the group knew it and I wasn’t going to point it out. I was curious what they’d have to say about this person. He’s one of the most positive people I know and his success is unquestionable. I expected the group to have positive things to say, but to my surprise, it was the opposite. There were a few folks that quickly made their stance known. I was in a bit of shock. I couldn’t believe they were talking about the same person I’ve known and watched grow over the course of years. Frankly, it was both ridiculous and unsettling.

“I’ve never liked that guy. He’s so lame to me.”
“He’s sooooo corny.”
“I think he’s gay but just won admit it.”
“I hate how people are so into him. He ain’t nothin special.”

And as they talked, I started to reassess why I was associating with many of them. Did I need new people? Was I missing something? How could such a positive person be talked about so negatively?

Then I reminded myself that everyone is entitled to their opinion — however disagreeable it may be. Then I realized something bigger. I realized that he isn’t for everybody. Despite the many that support what he’s about, there will always be a group of naysayers with loud opinions. And I’m sure he knows. But what’s most admirable is that he doesn’t worry about the ones that don’t support. He focuses on the ones that do, and the results are undeniable. His tribe has grown into thousands of people, including a few celebrities, despite the stones thrown at his house. This is something we all need to learn from and keep in mind. Let me repeat and paraphrase:

You are not for everybody. The sooner you accept it, the better off you will be. Don’t spend your time trying to convince the people that don’t like you how great of a person you are. Spend your time impacting the lives of the people that already know it. That’s positive energy well spent.

Rich

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This post resonates as my children now take off into the world accomplished and well raised young people. Your words are sage and true.

This post also puts me in mind of something else I learnt on my previous very hard trying-to-please-people-all-the-time-way, we also DON’T HAVE TO UNDERSTAND SOMETHING TO MOVE ON. Case in point, I could never understand why someone close often treated me the way they did when I was growing up.

Then one day, I took that perpetual and painful thought, stuck it in a balloon, blew it to the skies and walked away. I have no idea where that balloon is now…I just know it isn’t with me.

Nicely written post.

My best, HerMelness.

Rich

Thanks for your comment! Very insightful. Also, great point on not having to understand something to move on. I’m gonna have to share that on twitter!