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September 15, 2007

who am i....

Right now I'm at work at job #2. I've been here for over 7 years. i'm in the Sales Development office and I just got finished eating some smoked chicken that was catered to our Wireless Department for a contest that we won.

Last night I was in my room doing a clean up as well as a search and rescue for my MAC cosmetic brushes (worth over $600 bucks) which I have not seen since I came back from Chicago trip this August. I'm pretty sure I unpacked them but probably threw them some place in my room since we had new windows installed and was in a hurry to clean up my room so they wouldn't be snatched. Now is the problem of finding them and making sure in the first place that I had them with me when I did unpack from my Chicago trip.

Yesterday I had a hair appointment and had my hair relaxed. It's past my shoulders and straight. the same lady that did my hair yesterday is the same lady that has been doing my hair since I was a sophmore in high school. I'm 28 this year.

I wake up sometimes in the middle of the night and I go to my sister's empty room and will turn on the tv. I'll just sit in the middle of the room and remember where her bed and other furniture used to be. Don't get me wrong I'm happy for her that she moved out, but from time to time I do miss the pain in the ass.

Last night before I went to bed, I took my camera phone out and took pictures of myself. More to the point I took pictures of my face. Ive never really been comfortable about the way that I look. More comfortable in the past than in the present. I looked at the pictures and then went behind my bed and brought out a frame of picture of me that had been sketched by a man at the West County Mall over a year ago. I had forgotten about the pic and when I looked at it, it reminded me of a person from the past.

This past Friday I had work at job #1. A person that I used to be talking to off and on came up to my job because he had business to conduct. For a while I maybe I could really get to know this guy because I thought we had alot in common. This was back in November 06 to January 07. Yet I found out how conceited he was and how much he valued himself to constantly put himself on a pedistal to remind everyone else of his worth.

At first when we would start talking he thought it was best that we not put our business out in the open. I definitely agreed because this was a new job and personally I didn't think we had anything going on. We were just trying to get a feel for one another. Well it got the point he would come up to my job and he would just lil thangs to irriate me. He would say out loud and blatenly, "Hey how about you and me go get some lunch" in my office.

I looked at him and I'm thinking, didn't you say that anything we had to say to each other wouldn't crossover into work? I was embarrased and nervous because I could see some of the teachers and students looking on with interest. I declined nicely and told him that evening that in the future if you want to ask me something. That he needed to pull me to the side or call me on my cell phone.

He immediately apologized, but then he kept on doing it. It got to the point that with him constantly doing THAT along with some other issues I just decided not to talk to him anymore so seing him twice this weekend was a bit of overkill. He asked me this Friday if I wanted to go out for lunch and I told him, No. He asks why and I responded, because I said so and further more I have plans. He walks out of my office still with his professional smile plastered on his face but swings the door open like an upset child. all I could do was shake my head.

Unfortunately, I've seen it become a trend with some guys I've dealt with in the past that it's hard at least for me to really get to know a guy. I mean really get to know him. Depending on the guy somethings are probably more bound to irriate me than others. A perfect example. If a chick knows a dude and you both are cool, you might just like the guy as a friend. Sometimes you might exchange text messages and the gals are just on the joking manner. The dude from time to time might respond with some sexual intent behind. most of the time the chick just ignores them and just texts back some reply. Yet at times you get annoyed are like would ya just shut the fuck up with the dam sexual innuendos? That is just one scenario.

Oh hell, my lunch break is up. Oh well I just felt like ranting today. I have a surprise birthday party to go today down in the Delmar Loop. Take care and only 3 more hours at job #2 before I clock out. peace;)