12,045 Days ......(and counting)

Below is the poem entitled 12,045 Days ......(and counting) which was written by poet
Abe
Lopez. Please feel free to comment on this poem. However, please remember, PoetrySoup is a place of encouragement and growth.

12,045 Days ......(and counting)

My affirmation deceitfully severed
forever robbed by selfishness
Left to tackle life alone
Tumbling in the wake of my dad's mess
He left when I was three
The crevasse has increased for 33 years
Traded his life with us
For another woman and a couple of beers
He wasn't there to pick me up
When I fell off of my bike
To teach me how to fish
Or enjoy a nature hike
Now I'm a father to my son
Hoping not to make the same mistake
Living day to day on this lake of life
My son in tow through my own wake
It's been nine years and we're going strong
Six more years with my son
That's more with him than I had with mine
My son I guard in a web I've spun
A web of love, discipline, and nurture
Full of "I love you's" and "see ya in the morning"
A kiss before school and one before bed
Lots of playing, talking, reading, and singing
My son doesn't know the pain I feel
To not know my dad in intimate ways
No hands to comfort me or words to heal
No dad in sight for 12,045 days.............................(and counting)
------------------------------------------------------
My son and I have a great relationship and for this I am thankful......

You could never make the same mistake your father made, Abe. You have been blessed with a beautiful heart and have grown from this tragic experience. Congratulations on your recognition in the contest. Love, Carolyn

Cont: Forgive your dad, Abe; it's the best thing you can do for you. I hated mine for thirty years and I was the one who suffered because of it... He couldn't have cared less. Then I raised a step-son whose father is an alcoholic but who has changed his way. Now my son believes he has two dad's and that is an success story. I also raised a daughter and son of my own. Life is good... Great poem, Abe; reckon you can tell I connected with it. Will be watching for your stuff mi amigo. ~<><

Lost my dad when I was 7 yoa. Was raised by an alcoholic step-ather who hated me for hanging on to my father's memory. Our relationship deteriorated to five years of verbal, physical and sexual abuse which was ended with me pointing a loaded rifle to his face and my mother stepping in front of it. She saved me from prison. I forgave my step-father (15 years later) and the last six months of his life he spent alone, in a hospital, with no one to care for him. ~<><

Hi, Abe! congratulations on your first round win. Your poem evokes memories of sadness and hurt I can relate to. You trying to be a better father to your kid, because you were deprived of your father's love and affection. We learn from life and people around us. Some heed the signs and avoid making the same mistakes that make us so miserable. Your poem is so inspiring and emotional. Good luck with the contest. Warm Regards, Andrew.

I kind of connect with this poem in that I really don't have that good of relationship with my father either; but, at this point it a committed effort that both of us have to do. I thank God for my mother and my Heavenly Father and I know that even though my parents have been divorced for most of my life, my mom and I still know that I have an earthly dad that wants to connect with me. By the way, I liked your poem!

Well bless you Abe that inspite of no role-model you are able to be a good father to your son. I never knew mine. Sometimes life gives us lemons and I'm a great lemonade maker ... smile ... thanks for this wonderful write and congratulations on having it featured this week at the Soup !!