Friday, January 29, 2010

Why has no one told me about this woman? Why have I never overheard her name in conversation? Where has she been all my life? Will I live long enough to make every single last recipe that's on her website, because they all look to-die-for delish?! These are questions with no real answers?

Thursday, January 28, 2010

We got our notification Tuesday that we passed our background check and will be starting our training classes for foster care next Thursday! We're supposed to get some sort of "invitation" from the training center letting us know when and where and all those important details. I may be attending this first class by myself, though. Mike is out of town next week on Thursday, but can make up the class the following week, they say. I'm really looking forward to getting started on the classes. It just makes it seem a bit more real.

We've been looking at the possibilities of adopting through foster care from other states as well. In Arkansas, there aren't many children under the age of 10 even that are ready for adoption from the foster system, but that's not always the case in other states. Most of the time, when a young child (infant/toddler/etc) goes into foster care, typically their foster parents have the first option of adoption if/when that child is able to be adopted. Therefore, most of the little kids are adopted by foster parents. We're interested to see, though, what other states options are. Some states you have to be a resident for a particular period of time before being able to be a foster parent, so we're trying to figure out what our boundaries are where that's concerned. We're just praying for wisdom right now in our decision.

I'm loving reading through the Old Testament. Now, I'm sure my tune will change a bit once I hit Numbers and all that mess with the geneologies and the begats, but for now, I'm enjoying my reading. My questions have just increased by about a thousand percent, though. Gina, I'm coming after your OT knowledge sometime soon!!

Speaking of Bible reading, Mike and I had a GREAT, long converstaion with Tanner tonight about the Bible, church, and just God in general. I love when we have talks like that! It's SO awesome to see her grow not only physically, but also spiritually and intellectually. She has such a sweet and tender heart and I just know God is going to use her big time.

And let me just go ahead and say that there is not much more that makes my husband more attractive to me than when he's "into God". Since the fast, I can tell God has done a MAJOR change in Mike's attitude about several things. It's just awesome to see how God's working in his life... and how Mike is LETTING God work! He's just being so...open. He's been in the Word a ton. He's switched some podcast listening from sports stuff and general talk radio things to a couple different pastors - that he's begging me to listen to as well. And we even had a quite lengthy conversation last night about the stuff God was teaching us in our quiet times. Not that we never talked about that sort of stuff, but it's just different. There's an excitement there for both of us individually that hasn't been there like this before. I am going to be in daily prayer that we keep this going and that it only gets better.

On the prayer front, I got a book that I started today called "Prayer: Does It Make Any Difference" by Phillip Yancy. It was recommended by my friend Jennifer the other day at Bible study after our discussion. I'm really looking forward to getting into it and reading what he has to say. That is part of my "quest" to be a Godly woman is to have a more effective and meaningful prayer life. And girls, if you're reading this, your comments really stuck with me and I appreciate them so much!

There are some matters that I'm in deep prayer about lately. I'm looking forward to being able to share some of those things at a later time and especially when I see how God answers those prayers. On a couple things, it seems like the answer is "wait". I do believe that is my least favorite thing about what God says to me. I can handle a "no" much better than I can deal with "yes, but you have to wait." Nope. Don't like that one at all. But, God is developing perserverance during our wait, which is a certain testing of MY faith, making us mature and complete, lacking nothing.

An ice store is upon us tonight. School is cancelled tomorrow. The kids and I will be chillin at the hizzay! But Lord Jesus, please oh please, spare our power and keep it going!!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

I have much to blog about, but little time in which to get it accomplished. This afternoon, maybe? We'll see.

Porter and I are off to a play date today with some friends from MOPS before the Epic Storm '10 hits (so named by my friend Superchikk). I hope it's not as bad as people are saying. I do NOT need another storm like we had last year!!!

More updates on my life coming soon. I know you are on the edge of your chairs... :)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

I was able to have a good time with the Lord this morning before any of my family was out of bed. I do love some Old Testament, but still, there are questions. And let me just go ahead and put it out there that Moses is totally a man when he's writing this.... He just skimmed over the whole lot of the stories! Not NEAR enough details!! Now, if God had chosen a woman to write it, it would have been about a thousand times longer....which is probably why only men authored the books of the Bible. Hmmm.... Did I just say that? :) Although, I must say, I'm not sure about Ruth. That's a much more chick-flick type book than the other books. If Ruth was a movie, I'm sure my husband would find an excuse not to go see it because it would be a girl movie. I'm just sayin'.

I did have to rush a bit before school because I didn't have as much time to get myself ready as I would have liked because Rachel and Porter couldn't wear PJ's to school - that would have just been a teensy bit inappropriate. Thank God they were having something at school that Rachel would eat - school lunch it is today, baby girl! Woohoo!! Thank you, Walker Elementary, for serving spaghetti today! You saved me from a breakdown!

I got to go to our first session of our Bible study today at church. We're doing Believing God by Beth Moore. It is going to be AWESOME!! All of Beth's studies are just incredible and I know this one is going to follow suit, so I'm excited! And I have a table full of awesome ladies with me through this journey! I know God has placed each of them at my table for a reason and I'm anxious to see that played out over the next several weeks.

After Bible study, one of our precious ladies offered to take us all to lunch at Mad Pizza in Rogers. Um, let me just say - YUM-O and a huge THANK YOU to Diane for allowing us all to enjoy that time together and that yummy pizza!! For this girl who was headed home to a PB&J and also pinching the life out of every penny these days, that was a blessing!! And I loved visiting with everyone there. It was a sweet time of fellowship.

Now I'm sitting here typing away, listening to a bit of music and am about to do a little cleaning while I can get it in during Porter's nap. We are eating out of our pantry and freezer for the next couple of week and are going to try to go to the store as little as possible, so I've got to get all creative for dinner tonight. I'm about to do what my friend Jennifer did and make and freeze several meals so that we'll have them for the week. LOVE THAT! I'm totally going to copy you, girl!

And for those who may not know, I'm a major huge fan of American Idol! I mean, major huge like I voted for Kris Allen over 300 times for the finale last year. With my votes and Mike's put together, we voted over 600 times for dear Kris. And OBVIOUSLY, it paid off - cause who's the American Idol?! Yep. Exactly. So I will be watching tonight. And we can only hope there is another good laugh or two in there like we got last week with the dude singing something about pants on the ground. Yeah, if you haven't seen that yet, you must youtube it!! It will bless you, I promise.

I'm off to get a few things doen before Porter wakes up and Rachel gets home from school. Gotta make hay while the sun's still shinin'.

Monday, January 18, 2010

The Old Testament is fun to read, don’t get me wrong. But it confuses me! I’m a novel reader. I love the details in the stories I’m reading. I love to know the whys of a situation. And I do not feel I’m getting that while I’m reading in Genesis. I told someone the other day, it really will take me literally forever to sit down and chat with all these people in heaven trying to figure out what they were thinking or what possessed them to do whatever they did.

I’ll give you some examples of the things that are confusing to me or that I have additions questions about:

Why in the world did Eve give that apple to Adam? Seriously. What was that girl thinking?!

Why was it not until Adam’s grandson, Enosh, that people began to worship the Lord? Obviously God had some sort of communication with Adam and Eve and even Cain and Able, but it says that it wasn’t until Enosh’s lifetime that people began to worship the Lord.

How did people live so long – and was it really THAT long? Are their years number the same as ours? And if so, what in the world did they look like at 200, 500, and even 900 years old? I mean, Seth wasn’t born to Adam until he was 130. But when did they start counting Adam’s age?

Genesis 6:4 REALLY makes me wonder: “In those days, and even afterward, giants lived on the earth, for whenever the sons of God had intercourse with human women, they gave birth to children who became the heroes mentioned in legends of old.” (NLT) There are so many questions in just that one verse, it’s ridiculous!

Why did the men think it was ok, as in Abram’s situation with Sarai, to tell the kings or whoever that their wives were their sisters and give them up to the kings’ harems?

And what in the world was Sarai thinking to give her maidservant to her husband to sleep with? Why did ANY of the women do that? I mean, I realize these ladies had a desire for children, but what in the world?

What about Lot offering his two daughters to these creeps in place of the two complete strangers that he’d just taken in? Are you kidding me?! I do not get that AT ALL! I was looking in my study bible at the commentary for that situation and it says “ Lot’s offering his daughters is explained (though not justified) by the demands of hospitality, which obligated a host to protect his guests at all cost.” Even if that “all costs” meant giving his daughters to these dudes to do only God knows what to them? That, in my opinion, is seriously messed up!

And what’s with Lot’s daughters getting him drunk and sleeping with him to get pregnant? That’s just gross, my friends. G-R-O-S-S. And we think that what some of the kids these days do is crazy. They’ve got nothing on some of these Old Testament people. I mean, really.

What was Isaac thinking when his dad was about to kill him? I’m sure a thought something like, “That dude has lost his ever lovin’ mind!!!” would have rolled through my head. And what all happened in that scenario? Did Isaac put up any kind of fight against Abraham? Did he willingly get up on the altar? I get what the whole point was behind it, sort of, but still – I’d like to know more details, especially from Isaac’s point of view.

The whole deal of Jacob and Esau gets me too. What is the difference between a blessing and a birthright and what was the big deal with either of them? Why couldn’t Isaac bless both of them? Why just one? I’m sure if I knew Jewish history a bit more, I’d understand. But I don’t know the history, therefore, I’m still confused. :)

I totally don’t get the whole deal with Laban giving Leah to Jacob instead of Rachel and then making Jacob work for forever to “earn” Rachel. And then it seems like those girls just go back and forth having babies and it’s like a competition or something.

Why was it ok for these men of God to have concubines or to sleep with their wife’s/wives’ maidservants? Was it always ok for them to sleep with more than one woman?

And all these questions are just a few I have and Genesis isn’t even over yet. If any of you Old Testament gurus have an insight to any of these, feel free to put your two cents in. I’d love to know more about all this stuff. And I’m sure I will have many more questions as I read on through the OT. Like I said, I enjoy it – it fascinates me – but it brings up so many questions for me. Guess that just means I need to study more… Or Google it. :)

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

One of my prayers through this time of corporate fasting and prayer has been that God would form me into a godly woman. I don’t want to be a casual Christian. I want to be the kind of woman that when people think of me, the first thing they would think is that “she really is a godly woman”. When I grow up, I want to be like some of these older ladies that I see, ladies like Mike’s granny where it can be said that there is no doubt from anyone that ever knew her or knew of her that she was for SURE going to be in heaven!

The first thing that’s hard for me to grasp in that request is the “woman” part. There are times that I have to remind myself that I’m 34 years old. For anyone else, 34 is for sure an adult. There are other times I have to remind myself that I’m a parent to three children. For anyone else, having three kids must mean that you’re an adult. I’ve been married for almost 9 years. For anyone else, that’s a good amount of time and surely, if you’ve been married that long, you’re an adult. But most of the time, it’s hard to put it into words… I just don’t feel like I’ve achieved adulthood. Not that I feel like I’m still a kid or that I’m not mature, but that being an adult or being considered a “woman” is something for people older than me… or younger than me… or just other people than me. I guess it’s a feeling of inadequacy. I sometimes don’t feel like I’ve “earned” adulthood yet. I don’t know what would need to happen in order for me to feel that I had earned it or achieved it. I guess I feel like I haven’t arrived yet.

The other part is the godly part. This stems from part of the “woman” part. I’ve been asked to be one of the leaders of a Bible study at church. I saw a list of all the group leaders of that study. My name is on that list. And I am humbled. For one thing, I’m the youngest one of the bunch – hence the apprehension on the “woman” part. Am I old enough to be a leader? Or a better question is am I mature enough to be a leader? Then to broach the “godly” aspect of it… what in the world is my name doing on the list with all these awesome, godly women?! I don’t feel like I’m nearly adequate enough to lead with these ladies. Satan is wrestling with me on that and causing me to wonder why in the world would any other female want to be in my group when they’ve got all these other ladies to choose from? I certainly wouldn’t choose me… but then that makes me want to be the kind of woman that I would choose. If that makes any kind of sense at all. I would love to be someone that people gravitate toward, not because of who I am, but because of the Christ they see in me. There are a few people that come to mind when I think of those that I gravitate toward. There is just something about being around genuinely, godly people. You come away energized. That’s the kind of person that I want to be.

As we start this new Bible study, I have a feeling God is really going to change my life through it. He’s already changing me through our fast. There’s more of a yearning for Him than there was before. There’s more of a hunger for His word. I want to have a clearer discernment of God’s will in my life. I want to be so in tune with Him that I can be in a loud, crowded place, but still be able to hear the still, small voice of my Father.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Are you one of my "followers"? Do you follow my blog? If so, I'd love to know! Leave me a comment or click over to the side where it says "follow".

And can I just say that I don't know when I've ever been this ready for a Monday?! I'm really looking forward to getting back into the routine of everything. I feel like I've been dormant for weeks! When it's summer, it seems like it goes in a flash. This Christmas break, though infinitely shorter than the summer break, seems like it's been two years long! I'll probably be kicking myself by the time this week's over with and the me at the end of the week will probably want to come back in time and slap the now me in the noggin and say, "What the heck were you thinking?!" :) But for now, bring on a new week and some routine.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Tanner and I went to the wedding of Brad Noblitt and Caitlin Emert today. That. Was. Precious! I enjoy going to weddings, but they are really special when it’s a sweet couple like Brad and Caitlin and both of their families.

One of my favorite parts of any wedding is watching the groom’s reaction when the bride enters the room. Today, that was absolutely priceless! Brad’s reaction was one of the sweetest things ever. He was giving it his best effort not to cry, but with little success. He later said when I talked to him that he was just so humbled. Now that is an awesome thing for a groom to say when he sees his bride for the first time on their wedding day.

I loved that my friend Rachel was taking pictures. She has more talent in her pinky finger than I could ever hope to have. I told her that with every picture she took, I just kept thinking, I can’t wait to see that one – I can’t wait to see that one – I can’t wait to see that one! If I could go back and do it again, I’d totally have her take my wedding pictures! :)

There were several things that I could count as my favorite parts of the experience:

* Hearing Alana Damron sing. Got to LOVE hearing that girl. WOW!

* Seeing Brad’s reaction when Caitlin came in.

* Seeing how proud Caitlin’s daddy looked.

* Getting to see Kim and Suzanne Noblitt again and give each of them hugs. Made me miss them more.

* Seeing both sets of parents join Brad and Caitlin on stage for prayer after they took communion together and lit the unity candle. That made me teary for sure!

* Watching/Listening to Brad sing to Caitlin. Oh my word.

* Seeing Brad and Caitlin OUTSIDE IN THE FREEZING COLD with Rachel taking their picture right after the ceremony as we were driving to the reception. Caitlin said she kept thinking “These better be GOOD!!” Heck yes, they better be good! That girl was in a strapless wedding gown and Rachel was wearing short sleeves? Crazy people. They’ll probably be the best pictures of the bunch. :)

* Watching Brad and Suzanne in the mother/son dance while they sang Celine Dion’s “I’m Your Angel” to each other. SO SWEET!

Over all, it was a super sweet wedding. I’m really glad we got to be there to experience that with them. Congrats, Brad and Caitlin!

Thursday, January 07, 2010

There’s a show on the Discovery Health Channel that I catch every now and then called “Adoption Stories”. I found one today that was about a family adopting a 4 year old foster child from California. Watching that made me want to go do a little more hunting on the internet, so off to the computer I went.

There are some sites that you can go to and view pictures of some kids in the foster system waiting to be adopted. Do NOT do it unless you are prepared to be broken hearted. We’ve looked at those sites before and just cried over all those kids who don’t have families. Mike has said more than once, “We need a bigger house.” I’m so tender-hearted when it comes to kids that if I could, I would take them all. If I see or hear of a baby or toddler, especially, that isn’t being cared for or is being mistreated, I just want to snatch them right up and bring them home with me and just love them to pieces. That’s one reason I haven’t pursued some of the mission trips where you just go and hold babies at an orphanage. I either wouldn’t be able to leave or I’d want to bring them all home with me. I don’t know that my heart would be able to handle it.

There’s a particular site I looked at this morning that had a listing by state of all the kids waiting to be adopted… then a listing beside it of all the churches in that state. Staggering. The poll was done in 2006 so you have to factor that in, but to give you an example, Arkansas had 937 children waiting to be adopted and 5,843 churches. In every state except one, there were WAY more churches than children. WAY MORE. I feel very convicted over that. And just the simple fact that there are sooooo many kids in this world that don’t have parents, or don’t have parents that will/can care for them, regardless of what state or country they are from absolutely breaks my heart.

It’s been so amazing to watch several of our friends answer God’s call on their lives to adopt, be in international, domestic, or through foster care. I’m excited that our journey has started and I can’t wait to see what God will do in our lives and in the life of the child He is preparing for our home.

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

So my husband is in Minnesota and he said it's not THAT cold. "You could probably stand outside a good half hour in shorts and a T-Shirt before you fell over dead. Actually, you probably wouldn't FALL over because you'd be frozen to the ground."

And then there was a bit of silence so I asked him what he was doing, to which he answered, "I was just waiting until the car warmed up so I could touch the steering wheel without getting frost bite."

It's cold people. REALLY cold. I've never known it to be this cold in AR and I haven't ever been as far north as MN where the high tomorrow is supposed to be -3 I think he said. Freakin burr.

Thank God for shelter and for luxuries like a fireplace insert with a blower and a husband who took the time to cut wood several months ago and then stack a bunch of it in our sunroom so I could keep a fire going continually. I am NOT taking that for granted for sure! I'm counting my many blessings...

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

I’m debating on whether or not to say that I actually have New Year’s Resolutions. I don’t know that they are resolutions, per say, but I do have a few things that I would like to accomplish this year.

I would like to read the Bible through in a year. I have never done that. I’m sure that at some point or another in my life, I’ve probably read every verse in the Bible, but I want to know for sure. I want to say that I accomplished that. I have a One Year Bible that I’ve started on, so we’ll see how it goes. So far, so good – but we’re only on day 5.

I want to read at least 2 books a month. Now to some (ahem, Michelle), that might seem like child’s play. But I’m a really slow reader and I might get one book a month read. I love to read and there are many books that are on my list of must-reads. So I want to accomplish at least 2 books a month.

I want to clear off at least one of my Mary Kay shelves. I have three two shelves in my laundry room right now that have Mary Kay products on them. I’m not currently doing parties or facials and therefore don’t have a major need for a ton of product. I’m currently having a 50%-75% off sale to get rid of some of the stuff that’s been sitting on my shelves for a long time in order to house the stuff that I sell on a regular basis. If you’re reading this and need some makeup, please let me know! My credit card company would appreciate any sales I could make! HA!

Will we have another snow day tomorrow? The rest of this week? It remains to be seen. It might end up being a full 3 weeks out of school. I told someone earlier today that I love my kids, but I think I might love them more if I wasn’t with them 24/7. Mama needs a day…

About Me

I've been married to my wonderful husband since 2001, who I met in our Sunday school class. I was blessed to gain, Tanner, my sweet stepdaughter, who's now a teenager. We then had a sassy daughter, Rachel, who was born in 2004. In 2007, we had Porter who's stolen my heart. On April 3, 2013, we were able to adopt our precious Grady, who's a big ol' mess! I'm the Director of Preschool Ministries at Cross Church Fayetteville and totally love my job. I love Jesus and am on a daily journey to know Him more. My greatest desire is for people to see Christ in me.