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Can we have a better method of tabulation for the results than this. Let’s have a real table with names of all political parties on the column headings then constituencies on the first column. we can put the name of the candidate and number of votes on the box connecting the party name and constituency. That i think would be more readable and it would be easier to search for results of a particular constituency. More like the tabulation of provincial results shown on the story titled “2013 total political eclipse” carried by this paper. You can clearly see that such a format is more readable than this one.

On his lat last visit to England, Tsvangirai met with the Queen. During tea, he asked her, ”Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Iam almost the president in Zimbabwe, Are there any tips you can give me?”

“Well..,” said the Queen, “..simply surround yourself with intelligent people.”

Tsvangirai a bit amused then asked, “But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?”

The Queen took a sip off her cup of tea and replied. ”Oh, that’s easy, you just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle.”

Tsvangirai now baffled asked further “What kind of riddle?” The Queen pushed a button on her intercom. ”Please …send David Cameron in here, would you?

David Cameron walked into the room and said, “Yes, Your Majesty?”

The Queen smiled and said, “Answer me this please… David, your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?”

Without pausing for a moment, David Cameron answered, “That would be me.”

“Yes! Very good,” said the Queen.

So Tsvangirai went went back to Zimbabwe and asked Chamisa the same question, “Answer this for me mufana. Your mother and your father have a child. It’s not your brother and it’s not your sister. Who is it?”

“I’m not so sure…, said Chamisa, “Let me get back to you on that one…”He went to Biti and also asked Alex Magaisa, but none could give him an answer.

A day later before a cabinet meeting, Chamisa asked Cde Mugabe who was already sat in his chair waiting for others.. “Sir, can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it’s not your brother or your sister. Who is it?” Mugabe answered sharply, “That’s obviously me!”

Chamisa smiled in amazement, and said, “Thanks!” Then, as soon as Tsvangirai entered the room Chamisa shouted from across the table. ”Mukoma,I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It’s Cde Mugabe”.

Tsvangirai stopped, frowned and angrily shouted at Chamisa. “No wonder our party isn’t moving forward, I don’t have intelligent people around me! The answer is David Cameron you idiot.”