9 things you learn when you get away from it all

As I write this down now, I officially end my hiatus that lasted the past two months.

It was a much needed break. I ended my relationship with my girlfriend, whom I loved very much back then. I wasn’t depressed or anything, but I was emotionally drained and extremely tired out.

Add to that, I felt my writing and business was going nowhere. My income was stable, but I was frustrated that I couldn’t find ways to step it up to truly feel inspired and attain the results I really want.

Thus, I, for a lack of a better word, escaped.

What have I been doing?

I traveled. I went to Korea for the first time to meet my best friend there. I went to Bangkok too actually, but this time as a single guy who had real, touristy fun with the boys.

Other than that, I didn’t do shit. I was laying at home almost everyday playing video games, reading fiction, going out for Bboy practice sessions and working out more.

Indeed, I cleared my head.

There’s a bunch of interesting things you learn about life and yourself when you decide to drop it and not do a damn thing on purpose.

The question is, do you dare to actually take a break?

1) Sometimes the answer lies in doing nothing

Because working too hard can be pretty aimless. It’s true. Working hard is good, but the grind may make you too disillusioned.

It’s ironic, but focusing too much on the daily work itself is still not focusing on the end goal.

That is why you need to block out the world while you continue to remember what is it you really want. I wrote about this here, as inspired by Gordon Ramsay’s AMA. Here’s a little preview of it below:

Of course, this is where you need to be really honest with yourself. No half-hearted truths are allowed. You can’t think, “I guess this is my goal. It’d be good to do that.”

Nah. You need to have a goal which makes you want to scream with joy, something that’d make you want to unleash the beast within.

2) When you stop working, certain things may surprisingly work out wonderfully

I honestly haven’t written a damn thing the last two months, but I was active via email to my subscribers.

Hence, I still made a decent amount of money.

It’s weird, but from not doing shit, I discovered what actually worked. This is what gives you focus. This is what allows you to know what works, and what doesn’t.

3) You aren’t going to die because it’s not the end of the world

Because life isn’t that bad.

If you give a crap about yourself just a little bit, things will work out.

So the question is, how much are you giving a shit when it comes to you? How much is your life based on you? How much do you actually love yourself?

Be honest here. You’ll be surprised how many “NO”s you’re saying to yourself.

4) You’ll have time to remember your roots

Your WHY in life. Your ultimate purpose. Your deepest love that drives you. All of these are important as they inspire you all the time.

Sadly, a lot of us forget about them all the time as we get caught up in life. Shit is always getting in the way.

5) You can easily discover if you’re highly introverted or extroverted

In other words, do you grow and recharge alone or with people around you?

Even during my hiatus, I felt a lot of friends could still find their way to annoy me. Of course, I take responsibility for all perceptions and feelings I create in myself, but nonetheless, it has given me a good idea of who I want to include in my life.

Quite a few friends were shocked that I’ve ended my relationship. Some were sad. Some were concerned. Some had the gall to dismiss my relationship was nothing as I’m supposedly a bad boy who cheated on her.

It’s bullshit, but it’s okay. As long as you’re sure of who you are, nothing else matters.

6) You shouldn’t rush recovery that much

So now that I’m single, I’ve been fooling around with the Tinder app. It’s pretty fun to meet new and interesting people.

But at the end of the day, I couldn’t help but question the superficiality and convenience these apps bring. I couldn’t help but wonder if true love can be found here, not that I want any love now.

As much as I believe in actively making yourself a better person, some things can’t be rushed.

Hence, if you ever feel uncomfortable, that is when you need to fucking stop and take a breather. That is when you answer the questions that have been bugging you. It’s okay. Just answer them. Answer from the heart. No one else needs to know your answer. You just be cool with what you have.

7) People do love you

I’ve nothing but heartfelt thanks to my readers who bothered to write in and give me their well wishes when I announced that I was going to take a break.

Thank you so much, for real.

The people who care will be the same ones who wonder where you’ve gone.

Don’t lose these people.

8) Above all else, you have to learn to love yourself

There is nothing more important than loving yourself.

You need to take a break and drop it all, then realize you’re allowed to love yourself.

Thank You so much for these insights Alden. Glad that you’re back from your trip and keep up writing. It sounds you’re refueled and recharged to go on creating real and cool stuff about Life. we’re looking forward to your upcoming postings. We always got inspired through Your unveiled outlook to Life and love your unique, honest and courageous approach. We’re grateful, to be in your community 🙂

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Yo! This is Alden Tan. And this is the blog that is honest as fuck. Why honest? Because I've no time for bullshit. I write about self-improvement in all areas in life and I won't skim on the truth. I'm in your face. Sometimes, I write tales of fiction too.
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