25.5.16

This week Forest reviews yet another low rent sword and sorcery flick, this time with David Carradine in The Warrior and the Sorceress. Cory joins in the fantasy fun with the underrated Krull.

The Horror Duo also riff about Captain America: Civil War, Nazi punks in Green Room, and Cory blows his load when he plays Ninja Gaiden for the NES. All this and, "George Lucas put Jar Jar in my butt.".

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With regards to Gareth Edwards leaving Godzilla, the reasoning is that he has directed two tentpole pictures in a row and he sort of wants a rest to pursue smaller projects. Legendary Pictures had delayed the production of Godzilla 2 by four years so Edwards could do it, but now will have to get a new director.

As far GREEN SLIME, the movie is less INCREDIBLE MELTING MAN and more "What if ALIENS had been directed by the Special FX team of the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers?"

I had some issues with Captain America: Civil War.* Should've been Avengers: Civil War.

* Too biased towards Captain America's side when it comes to dialogue. They dumb down what should be thought provoking conversations. Stark and others should've come up with valid points such as, "Would you rather be an enemy of all the governments of the world? How effective would we be then? What would the repercussions be of going against them?" As in government control over them is inevitable.

* Flaws shown for Stark, not so much for Captain America. A character with no flaws isn't interesting (fuck Superman by the way).

* Pulling plot developments out of their asses as opposed to building upon the foundations set forth in previous films (random black woman's son is a casualty as opposed to the dipshit kid from Iron Man 3; no mention of Stark's parent's deaths in prior films).

And you guys say the plot doesn't matter, but what the hell were you discussing for the first 20 frikkin' minutes of the podcast episode? Of course the plot matters!

I thought The Warrior and the Sorceress was just a meh movie. I'm surprised you didn't point out that some of the music was from Deathstalker, about as surprising that you didn't do Sorceress first, considering it's a much simpler title without any "the" in the title, and considering it's name is in The Warrior and the Sorceress, making it a sort of prequel (not really, I'm just trying to find more and more things to bitch about for the hell of it). Plus it's a more entertaining movie than David Caradine and Topless Woman, aside from some poor lighting and shooting choices during the film's brief intro arc. Get past that arc, and the rest of the film is a nonstop riot. With 2 pairs of tits, naturally formed on 2 beautiful women, as opposed to 2 pairs on one chick making her some fucked up cow maid from Japan.

Anyway, I did a drunk review of The Warrior and the Sorceress a while back if you're interested in reading drunk rants:http://letterboxd.com/gex/film/the-warrior-and-the-sorceress/

I should probably watch Krull again. Speaking of which, and speaking of Kevin Sorbo, please tell me you guys have seen Kull the Conqueror. It's the 90's sword and sorcery movie that was made for me, it never ceases to entertain me for all the right and wrong reasons. You'll find it interesting just delving into the backstory as to how it relates to the Conan films/books.

PS: And Zathura sucks ass. You give me several beers, some hard liquor, and ice cream, and broccoli, and carrots, and wheat thins, and I'll tear that film to pieces.

PPS: Sorry for the long comment, there was a lot for me to talk about.

One more thing: one of the more recent films to use the YOJIMBO plot was WAR (aka ROGUE) with Jet Li and Jason Statham. The film is one of Jet Li's worst, but if you feel the need to watch all movies with that storyline, then by all means watch it!

Cory's review of "The Blob" inspired me to revisit "Godzilla vs The Smog Monster" [or Godzilla vs Hedorah] from 1971. Smog Monster definitely takes some influences from "The Blob" and has some other genuine horror elements to it. It also features 'pollution porn', the Japanese hippie movement, Godzilla flying, and fish heads.