Wednesday, October 23, 2002

A pair of undies mysteriously appeared yet again on a bed at 42 Perry
Street. In a shocking development, the undies appear to have been used
recently.

A neighbor who wished to remain anonymous said, "What kind of monster would
leave their sweaty boxer shorts on a bed? I am really frightened that this
could spread very quickly to my floor."
A source close to the underwear said, "woof. yuck. woof. I woof, sleep here
woof."

Although no one knows how or why this has happened, police are speculating
wildly as to the identity of the undie-owner, now known world-wide as "The
Flinger." The chief of police said, "Sadly, we can not rule out terrorist
activity. The underwear may be a tactic by some rogue nation to beat down
the spirit of the American people." CNN has devoted round the clock
coverage to The Flinger. News leaked this morning revealed the pair of
men's panties were black, leaving police to fear that this perhaps signaled
an even more sinister turn to The Flinger's actions. To try and crack the
case, experts have been called to try and find out why each individual
undergarment is dubbed "a pair."

The woman who discovered the underwear on her bed is trying to recover, but
is said to be in "very pissed off" condition.

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