Dan Hodges is a former Labour Party and GMB trade union official, and has managed numerous independent political campaigns. He writes about Labour with tribal loyalty and without reservation. You can read Dan's recent work here

PMQs: Anyone fancy a go at being Leader of the Opposition?

Being Ed Miliband: by going through a little door in the House of Commons, anyone can be the Leader of the Opposition for 15 minutes

There was a brief flurry of excitement at PMQs this week. A rumour swept the chamber that the Leader of the Opposition was going to turn up.

Sadly, it proved to be false. Ed Miliband, Labour’s new shadow health secretary, had a brief dig at Michael Gove for being nasty to Lord Leveson, but then remembered himself, and spent the rest of his time asking the Prime Minister if he agreed with a nice doctor friend of his that the Government’s health reforms were crap. David Cameron didn’t, and Prime Minister’s questions finally got under way.

Tony Lloyd was first to have a go at calling the PM to account. What did he have to say to a couple on working families tax credit who had seen their benefits cut when the Work and Pensions secretary had pledged it wouldn’t be? The answer was not all that much. The Prime Minister has become so used to answering questions about GP fund holders and midwives he’d clean forgotten he might be asked about something else. So he did he what he always does when can’t think of what to say. He blamed his broken promise on the previous Government.

David Cameron leapt to his feet. This was more like it. “We promised we’d have doctors growing faster than bureaucrats,” he boasted, and sat down again. He didn’t bother with the police or people being denied their tax credits. He clearly thought the image of an NHS staffed by Amazonian physicians and Pygmy administrators was enough.

Stewart Jackson stood up. On the surface he makes for an unlikely leader of the opposition, given he is actually the Conservative MP for Peterborough. But like many Tory MPs, Mr Jackson is a self-made man with an eye for the main chance. “Will the Prime Minister raise the loophole on multinational companies that allows the migrant cap to be flouted?”, he asked. “Or is this another tough immigration policy that will fall victim to the curse of Clegg?”

David Cameron looked pained. “My honourable friend is being unfair,” he chided, knowing full well the real victim of the curse of Clegg isn’t government immigration policy but the Liberal Democratic party.

Then Peter Bone got to his feet. A murmur of approval ran across the chamber. MPs knew this was bound to be good, though not necessarily for the Prime Minister. “What would happen if the Prime Minister was incapacitated?”, he asked.

David Cameron rose to laughter. He’d knew this question was coming he said, because Peter Bone had asked it to just about every member of the Cabinet. “I have no plans to be incapacitated”, he responded.

Poor Peter Bone looked very disappointed. Still, if he can’t be Prime Minister or a member of the cabinet, there’s a job leading Her Majesty's opposition going for a song.