Commentary 11-1: Proud to speak in Ohio tongue

By KARRIE McALLISTER Columnist

Thursday

Oct 31, 2013 at 5:00 AM

I grew up in Cleveland. It was city streets and suburbs for me; ethnic foods and strange traditions that my locally-born and bred husband does not understand. The poor guy is still adjusting to the scent of garlic and onions that start every single thing I cook.

But I have lived in Wayne County now for quite some time and I thought, for the most part, I had adjusted quite well. I can correctly pronounce "Wooster," "Dalton" and "Berlin." I thought I was practically granted local status, that I was blending in better than most.

And then we went to Cleveland.

I should say I can pick out a Cleveland accent within the first few words a person speaks. I brag about this ability, but most people think I'm just goofy.

So when my husband and I were in Cleveland, walking around downtown as loud football fans paraded next to us, I asked him the question, "well, now can you hear the Cleveland accent?"

"Sure, I hear it. You know, dear, you still have it."

I was flabbergasted. My jaw dropped and I choked on my own Cleveland-ese words so nothing came out except, "nuh uh."

"Oh yes. Every time you yell at the dog, it's like you revert to your old ways. Bay-d dog. It's all in the letter A."

And here I thought he always talked weird.

It is often said Ohioans don't have an accent. We pride ourselves on it, but in reality, we're all just a bunch of funny talking people. The Internet tells us those people around the major metropolis of Columbus are the only people in Ohio who do not have an accent. (This fact provided by People of Columbus.) And that every other major city has gained its own special way of speaking. The cities in between have acquired their own localized dialects. I know this because I hear it every day when I talk to apparent locals who can't correctly pronounce "kielbasa."

In order to unify us all, I offer these tips on how to stand proud of our state, from top to bottom, and sound like a true Ohioan.

1. Know how to correctly pronounce all the strange Native American names that grace our state. From Cuyahoga to Tuscarawas, and hopefully all of the streets in Wooster.

2. Call it pop. It's not soda or Coke, it's just pop.

3. If you warsh your clothes instead of wash them, we know you're from northeast Ohio but not from Cleveland.

4. End your sentences with an unnecessary preposition if at all possible. "Where's my hat at?"

5. And to truly speak like an Ohioan, especially a Clevelander, yell at your "bay-d" dog while cooking delicious onions and garlic on the stove.

Contact Karrie at www.karriemcallister.com.

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