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Two and a Half Men Season 4 Episode 14: "That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami" Quotes

Charlie: I am sorry about the hermaphroditic incident.Alan: "I'm sorry" does not make up for leaving me in a hotel room with a girl who had a vestigial penis.Charlie: I didn't know! I was as surprised as you were!Alan: Charlie, no one was as surprised as I was

Charlie: She works for me.Alan: Well then, tell her when something is on the shopping list, she should shop for it.Berta: I'm gonna slug him. Can I slug him?Alan: It's very simple. I've decided that I'm going to start drinking acidopholus milk. It promotes intestinal flora, which aids in healthy digestion. For three weeks I've been writing it on the shopping list. Yet, Berta insists on bringing home 2%.Charlie: Slug him.

Charlie: I just thought you two might hit it off. I'm even making a little welcome basket for you to give to her.Alan: So, she's beautiful, rich and single. Why would she want me? I'm broke, middle-aged, twice-divorced, sleeping on your hide-a-bed, and sharing custody of a flatulent, underachieving son.Charlie: We're gonna need a bigger basket.Berta: We're gonna need chloroform and a rope

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Charlie: I just thought you two might hit it off. I'm even making a little welcome basket for you to give to her.Alan: So, she's beautiful, rich and single. Why would she want me? I'm broke, middle-aged, twice-divorced, sleeping on your hide-a-bed, and sharing custody of a flatulent, underachieving son.Charlie: We're gonna need a bigger basket.Berta: We're gonna need chloroform and a rope