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Searching on Google for a
webpage about Nintendo's promotional videos, you know what I
found? Nothing. I guess that means I have the monopoly audience
for a page like this.

Between 1994 and 1998, Nintendo
made a total of seven promotional videos and sent them out to
various people on their mailing list and NP subscriber roll. I
don't know how effective they were, but there was a point where
Nintendo released one every 6 months. I have five of these, the
first being the true treasure--if you're going to go look for,
and maybe actually pay for, old Nintendo promo videos, this is
the one to get. Consider yourself uber-lucky if you got this in
the mail one day:

Yes, it's the
DONKEY KONG COUNTRY VIDEO. The loudest, most overhyped game of
the mid-90's was about to be released.

This is the only
Nintendo video that really has any historical value. Everything
else they had to hype in the coming years was always something
that barely made a dent in the PS1 behemoth market. But not
this...this game's remembered fondly now, by many many people who
never played the GBA version or saw the "TV series."
And the video made to herald its coming is not all fluff--you see
real behind-the-scenes junk, tips to beat it, and even surprises.
In my opinion this is the best of the Nintendo tapes; however Polas insisted
the best one was actually the Banjo-Kazooie tape of 1998. I asked why, he said: "Three words: Narrator Jon Lovitz." Okay, he wins...but this is the
second-best one, ever.

I heard someone
once complaining about how corny this was. He cited one example:
"What's the password?" "Diddy!" "DIDDY??
AWESOME!!!" *man gets face in camera*

But that's as bad as it gets,
actually. He must have been having a bad day or something. The
host of this video, some teenager with long crimp hair and a hat,
is the least annoying of any host in any Nintendo video,
depending on how you feel about Jon Lovitz. He doesn't overact or
overhost, and knows when to shut up and let the other guys talk.
The first guy he interviews is Ken Lobb, who now works for
Microsoft along with probably half the other people in this
video. We're shown the Nintendo offices, and several of the
workers who had involvement in the game.

Then we're taken
to the game testing area, and shown...THE DKC BETA CART! We're
being treated like kings here. The guy in the "Play it
Loud" shirt explains that each chip in there is 4 megabits
large, leading to a total of 32. For 1994, that was a shock...the
biggest that had ever been was Super Metroid with 20.

Then several
scenes obviously taken from the beta cart are shown. When was the
last time you got 838 bananas in Snow Level 1? Too cool. There's
also the obligatory "weird numbers on the screen" that
most betas have. You can't see this stuff without the video,
people...

There are also
shots that are pure CGI! Rotating models shown in various stages
of completion and a short film of DK falling down and getting
back up are shown occasionally. The only other place these were
ever seen were in the DKC ad. You want this video, admit it...

I forget what
involvement this guy had with the game, but the important thing
is where he's standing. It's not just any store, it's Nintendo's
Nintendo Store, located only in their headquarters. Egad, just
look at that place. I could've spent days there! It's still
around, but I don't want to go there now, I want to go there
THEN. Behind him is the Neo-Geo Super Nintendo Arcade Machine. I
know it existed because Izzy's Pizza had one from 1993 through
1995. It had Super Mario World, F-Zero and Super Tennis, and most
people already owned at least one of these at home, and wouldn't
pay 25 cents for just 10 minutes with them. But I would, and did.
The bare wordy screen that's flashing behind him is the one that
yells at you to put in more coins for more time, posted in that
Link to the Past font.

Then it was time
for...HOT TIPS! They show you how to snag a very rare blue
balloon and get 5 lives...they also show you how to make Donkey
roll on a barrel; I could never get this to work. Maybe I should
study the video and try again...

The video's final
segment is the "Roundtable," where several people sit
around and lie about the game. "I don't think people are
prepared for the level of 3D that this game will produce."
"I've played this game a hundred times and I never get bored
with it; I'm always finding new things, new challenges, new
tricks." It makes its final pitch after that, which is
similar to the DKC commercial that ran back then....images of the
game flashed with screens that say "NOT ON THIS!! NOT ON
THAT!! ONLY ON SUPER NES, NO WEIRD ADD-ONS REQUIRED!!" The
"no weird add-ons" was the genius part, because nobody
bought those then, and they don't now. Nintendo seems to have
forgotten this fact. It helped sell DKC though, really well. What
a great video...and the greatness isn't over yet!

As if everything
you just saw wasn't cool enough, if you kept the tape on for a
minute after it went black, it faded back in to a surprise
10-second announcement of Killer Instinct for the SNES! Back
then, though, it wasn't for the SNES yet, it was for the N64. The
arcade version that was being completed at the time was supposed
to be running on the hardware for that new system, and the arcade
game touted this: "Coming in 1995, for your Nintendo Ultra
64!" So the intent here was, you were getting your first
look at an N64 game. I've exhausted all possible ways to say this
video rules by now, so just make up your own.

Nintendo didn't
make another video for two years...then they went into an ad-tape
frenzy when the N64 arrived. I promise I'm not going to gush over
those as much as I gushed over this--it's impossible anyway. This
part's over. Or maybe not...the video also had a little pamphlet
insert, and if you want to see that too, you can. Hey, no one
else has a page on these--it's up to me to provide everything.