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My stepmom hates me....

My stepmom hates me and I really don't know why. On the rare occasions I used to call my father she wold delete my messages. I've only met her a few times (my parents divorced when I was inmiddle school, I'm in my 20's now).

It wouldn't nomally bother me because I'm not very close to my father (purely due to his own dumb life decisions) but I felt she acted really inappropriately at my grandfather's 80th birthday party. Though they've been together off and on for about five years they aren't married so my grandfather referred to her as my father's special friend (I really don't think he meant anything by it) while toasting everyone. She apparently decided that dring the dinne rin front of everyone was the place to voice her displeasure, and somehow I got the blame for her being referred to as a special friend.

1. I don't get why I'm being blamed for this, we barely speak, I don't know her, I really have no interest in my father's personal life

2. Maybe the family would react morewarmly to her if she didn't get drunk at an old man's bday party and cause a scene

I don't feel its fair that family gatherings should be made awkward for me because of her, whatever situation she has with my father or grandparents has nothing to with me.

Should I explain to her I don't care? Should I say something to my grandparents about her presence 9wouldn't that jstify her hatred???)

Usually when someone is hated, there is a reason. You may not be privy to that reason, but she has one.

Maybe she hates you because you are judgemental of her and your father. You seem that way in this post.

Or maybe she hates you because by your own admission your calls were rare. And what were the calls like... maybe she had a reason for deleting those.

Or maybe she hates you because you "really have no interest in [your] father's personal life." Or maybe because you have only met her a few times and she sees that as rude. Who knows?

I think you need to chill over the whole thing. If I had relatives like you all, I would probably have to get drunk at family gatherings as well.

This is a perfect example of bringing personal bias to a situation. Blame the child. You like doing that.

What the fuck did she describe that warranted the need to get drunk at family gatherings? Project much? It doesn't sound like OP has done anything except come here to see if she should involve herself to protect her grandfather.

You just need more beads. You are bringing your own bias. I wasn't blaming her, I was raising legitmate thoughts and opinions. Kinda like you. I wasn't projecting but you sure are onto me. Ra ma da sa, sa se so hung. Adding my favorite version just for you.

Usually when someone is hated, there is a reason. You may not be privy to that reason, but she has one.

Maybe she hates you because you are judgemental of her and your father. You seem that way in this post.

Or maybe she hates you because by your own admission your calls were rare. And what were the calls like... maybe she had a reason for deleting those.

Or maybe she hates you because you "really have no interest in [your] father's personal life." Or maybe because you have only met her a few times and she sees that as rude. Who knows?

I think you need to chill over the whole thing. If I had relatives like you all, I would probably have to get drunk at family gatherings as well.

This is a perfect example of bringing personal bias to a situation. Blame the child. You like doing that.

What the fuck did she describe that warranted the need to get drunk at family gatherings? Project much? It doesn't sound like OP has done anything except come here to see if she should involve herself to protect her grandfather.

this.

OP, not all SMs are like this. Most of us love our stepchildren. there are just a few nutters out there. I'm sorry you got stuck with one of those.

I think the OP needs to get a life away from her dad, away from her mom, and grow up some. There are some nutters who covet as well. Well, you already know that.

Definetly. Covetors abound. but, this is a post by a stepchild, and her SM hates her, she does not covet her.

Usually when someone is hated, there is a reason. You may not be privy to that reason, but she has one.

Maybe she hates you because you are judgemental of her and your father. You seem that way in this post.

Or maybe she hates you because by your own admission your calls were rare. And what were the calls like... maybe she had a reason for deleting those.

Or maybe she hates you because you "really have no interest in [your] father's personal life." Or maybe because you have only met her a few times and she sees that as rude. Who knows?

I think you need to chill over the whole thing. If I had relatives like you all, I would probably have to get drunk at family gatherings as well.

This is a perfect example of bringing personal bias to a situation. Blame the child. You like doing that.

What the fuck did she describe that warranted the need to get drunk at family gatherings? Project much? It doesn't sound like OP has done anything except come here to see if she should involve herself to protect her grandfather.

this.

OP, not all SMs are like this. Most of us love our stepchildren. there are just a few nutters out there. I'm sorry you got stuck with one of those.

I think the OP needs to get a life away from her dad, away from her mom, and grow up some. There are some nutters who covet as well. Well, you already know that.

Definetly. Covetors abound. but, this is a post by a stepchild, and her SM hates her, she does not covet her.

so the coveting thing is a bit bizarre.

kinda makes me long for the niquil buz that you're on.

No, no niquil. the coveting thing is for you. And yes, you and yours do abound. Coveting is very sad.

OP is an adult, the woman she says hates her isn't her stepmother, she is her Dad's girlfriend who she has met a few times. The girlfriend and the father are drunks, she also rarely talks to her Dad, this is a problem she can avoid and ignore, she isn't a child who has to endure.

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