Whining....help!!!!

06-05-2012, 08:02 AM

I need some help with my 3 YO DS's whining, as it is driving me crazy. He usually starts out using that awful, whiny, high pitched voice to demand something, and then escalates into full on crying and screaming if he doesn't get what he wants right that second. They tend to most often occur first thing in the morning, but they happen other times of the day too. I have tried asking him what he is feeling when he acts like this, or why he is doing it, and he just says "because I am". He is a pretty verbal little guy, but doesn't seem able/willing to let me know what's happening when he throws these fits. I have also tried telling him that I can't understand that voice, asking him to use his words, and even telling him that I was going to wear earmuffs because the sound was hurting my ears. I also try to acknowledge when he uses his proper voice to ask for things. Nothing seems to be working. We do have a new baby in the house, but the whining started before the baby arrived; I think I was just better able to handle it before I was up in the night with a newborn. I would appreciate any help with this, as I am feeling pretty guilty about losing my patience with him several times a day because of this whining. Thanks!

i don't think a 3 year old can seriously answer those difficult questions (why your are doing it and what are you feeling). my only thought would be to check how much he is sleeping in total within 24 hours. just could be that he is not getting enough sleep and hence is so winded up in the morning?

Comment

Okay so I have a just now 3 year old and we are going through the same thing. In my own journey to make it stop, a few things I learned.

Thanks to my hubby, he pointed out to me when I am tired and totally not with it, I whine at them to do things. I give declaritive statements about what to do without the whiny tone in my voice.

Don't be afraid of them getting upset. If the answer is NO to something, just say that. Take the control back. It is very easy to just give in because you know if you say those magic letters together N and O then there will be tears. Stand firm. I got my power back as a mother when I stood up.

Teach them how to handle the frustration. Stomping feet, making a face and blowing out their frustration is great. What CAN they do when they are mad? That is something you should list for them.

ALSO, a great book, HOW FULL IS YOUR BUCKET? TOM RATH. iT IS A MUST HAVE! It talks about a bucket as a tangible object that holds your feelings, great for adults and kids.