Confessed drug cheat Sandor Earl has revealed how he sunk to the depths of depression after he was issued with an infraction notice for use and trafficking of a performance-enhancing drug.

The former Roosters, Panthers and Raiders winger has broken his silence in an exclusive paid interview that will be screened on The Footy Show on Thursday on the Nine Network at 8.30pm.

Earl became the first player issued with an infraction notice as part of the Australian Sports Anti-Doping Authority investigation after he confessed to the use and trafficking of performance-enhancing drug CJC-1295.

‘‘I feel like I’ve had some hard times in my life but this is a battle like nothing else, by myself, when in people’s eyes you seem down and depressed, you don’t know what to do,’’ Earl says in the interview with Karl Stefanovic.

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‘‘When I have to deal with that on my own in Canberra it’s hard and I struggled with that all year; it’s a shame that the last year of my NRL season had to be like that, but it did and it was a hard battle.

''There were just times there where I didn’t even want to play football. Having to look your mates in the eyes like the other boys, that was one of the hardest things.

''Having to look the other Canberra boys in the eyes and tell them, ‘Oh yeah, everything’s going to be OK, I’m OK,’ and go out and play when I didn’t want to be there.

''That’s not for love of the game, that’s just because I was done. I’d had enough a quarter of the way through the season and I’ve got to look everyone in the eyes and continue on trying to play good football.’’

Earl also talks about his relationship with controversial sports scientist Stephen Dank and confirms he met Essendon officials at a meeting arranged by Dank, where Bombers coach James Hird was present.

He also discusses how he acquired, and the administration of, the illegal substances for which he received his infraction notice.

9 comments

We all know that he is going to blame Stephen Dank like everyone else has. Stephen Dank was at Manly for 5 years and at Cronulla for 2 months, but hardly a word about Manly, yet we read stories about Cronulla on a continual basis and Stephen Dank's association with Cronulla.

If Sandor Earl sought out Dank and failed to get 2nd opinions of a good sports medicine doctor the only person that can be blamed is Sandor Earl himself. Unfortunately in today's society it's always someone else's fault.

Commenter

Pierre

Location

Hurstville Oval

Date and time

September 25, 2013, 11:31PM

a truly heartbreaking tale - sandor has really changed my mind about the mistreatment of drug cheats in pro sports.

Poor Sandor. Channel 9 is kidding right. A drug cheat gets paid to tell his story. This is appalling and disgusting and I will not watch it. I hope others do the same.

Commenter

ajs

Location

NSW

Date and time

September 26, 2013, 6:05AM

Hmmm....my similar comment was rejected. I won't be watching either.

Commenter

validopinion

Date and time

September 26, 2013, 10:19AM

Cry me a river just like every other drug cheat. Next thing is a book deal and a TV show.

Commenter

Mud Flap

Date and time

September 26, 2013, 8:09AM

Gee, the poor guy -- drug dealing turns out to be not as rosy a life as he'd hoped, and now he's depressed. I'm a bit more interested in the answer to the as-yet-unasked question: to whom was he selling them?

Commenter

Lewis Winders

Location

Tasmania

Date and time

September 26, 2013, 3:16PM

Like most people, I made some howling mistakes in my early 20's, really shocking decisions. But I knew right from wrong when I saw it and didn't take these sorts of shortcuts to success. Sandour - you gotta do the time, man up and admit that you stuffed up. But it won't save you now. Also, Channel 9 paying for this story is particularly galling.

Commenter

Tufluv

Date and time

September 26, 2013, 9:02PM

Call me a mug but I have a soft spot for Sandor. He did his best for the Raiders and that's all I'm concerned about.

People like him get pinned to the wall for taking some drugs to help repair their broken bodies or getting drunk after the game, because they're supposed to be role models for our kids, yet it was OK for Win News to devote about 5 minutes to one of Sydney's most notorious characters, John Abrahim waxing lyrical about the Roosters prospects at their launch at the start of the season. The game is run by a gang of bloody hypochrites.