Of all the things you shouldn't build an iPod speaker system into, a washing machine has to be up there with the chainsaw. Why in the world would anyone think they need to build a music system into an appliance designed to be left alone for great lengths of time? And that vibrates loudly?

Well, despite the obvious conceptual flaws of building a product that quite simply has no use whatsoever, LG has patented designs for the world's first washing machine/podcessory hybrid.

The docking system is built alongside two speakers, which are mounted into the machine's top. We can't speculate just how good this would sound, but if you're familiar with the sound a washing machine makes when it's working, you'll understand our prediction that this would sound truly horrible, and perhaps be more offensive to the ears than a Roy Chubby Brown witticism screamed after ten pints of gone-off lager.

Unless the machine itself vibrates according to the music being played, to produce a sub-woofer effect, we're distinctly unimpressed that someone, somewhere, was paid for designing this.

Thankfully, this design is just the concept art that accompanies a patent filed by electronics maker LG. We're sincerely hoping that this is just a case of patent squatting -- the act of registering a potential invention on the off-chance that someone actually builds one in the future. Tut tut, LG. You should know that no-one with even the scarcest ounce of common sense would ever build something so hopelessly doomed to failure. -Nate Lanxon