Who needs a magistrate when you’ve got Stuart Ripley?

Why not abolish the appeal courts in this country and replace them with panels composed of former Middlesbrough FC wingers?

YET AGAIN we are forced to turn to Ashley Cole for the most succinct summary
of the FA commission’s report into the John Terry and Anton Ferdinand
affair. Ashley is becoming a bit of an oracle, a fount of wisdom on this
issue. Having read the report, or having had it read to him slowly by
somebody he employs for this purpose, Ashley, via the medium of Twitter,
natch, commented: “Hahahahaaaaaa. Well done #FA. I lied did I? BUNCH OF
TW***.”

We were initially told that as a consequence of what seems to me an extremely
accurate summation, if somewhat robustly expressed, Cole’s England career
may be in jeopardy. The tweet has since been removed, and I suppose this,
plus a writhing statement of regret, should be taken to imply a form of
contrition. I wish Ashley hadn’t been contrite: the FA in effect called him
a liar and impugned