Me: I’m calling about the Paul McCartney pre-sale tickets for the August 12 show in Phoenix.

Agent: No problem. May I ask you to confirm your credit card number?

Me: (Though I had just entered it through my key pad) XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Agent: Thank you, Ms Coore. May I ask you what you’re calling about?

Me: Oh, I just told you. Paul McCartney pre-sale tickets for the August 12 show in Phoenix.

Agent: Thank you. What date are you looking for Paul McCartney tickets?

Me: August 12.In Phoenix.

Agent: And where would that be?

Me: US Airways arena.

Agent: Yes and do you mind providing me with the city?

Me: The City of Hope. Phoenix.

Agent: Bear with me while I look that up.

Me: I appreciate your help. (Arghhhhhhhhhhh!)

Agent: No problem, Ms Coore.

#1. No problem. Yes. Of course, it is no problem. I didn’t expect it to be a problem. Why are you telling me this? Eliminate this forever. Instead, say, I’m happy to help.

#2. Don’t make me repeat stuff. Every time you do, according to CEB research, the less comfortable the customer feels moving forward with the sale. I entered the info; did you not get the memo? Why did I enter it if it wasn’t going to be provided to you?

#3. Listen. Do not be so procedure/script/stupid bound that you can not hear what I say.

#4. This is the 3rd thing I have had to repeat. I now feel like I’m talking to a very nice moron. Or maybe it’s me.

#5. “Bear with me” Could you find a bit more positive, hopeful, friendly way of saying this? Perhaps: I’m looking that up for you now. Or: Thank you. I’m checking on the best availability for you right now. Or: It’s a pleasure to help you and we appreciate your loyalty to ________. It will just take another moment to assist you best.

And back again.

Listen to yourself talk. Do you present a positive forward vision or a negative now thought?