Saturday, June 13, 2009

It has been months since we've enjoyed Alan Ball's deep south bon bon, so I thought a quick character re-cap might be in order. It's also not too late to jump on board if you missed the first season, and maybe this reference guide will help get you started if you're so inclined.

True Blood is "Twilight" for grownups. These vampires are not moody, sensitive teenagers. They are bad to the bone and have lots of sex with humans in a Louisiana bayou setting so steamy you can practically smell the Spanish moss.

Here's a little map to keep track of the characters:

Sookie Stackhouse (Anna Paquin)- Our heroine; part time waitress and full time lover of main Vampire Bill Compton. Sookie also has special powers (mind reader) which makes her like catnip for most vampires who sort of look down their noses at the bovine, helpless mortals.

Bill Compton (Stephen Moyer): He smolders, he talks like a 19th century southern gentleman and he's super nice to church ladies. When he unfurls his vampire teeth they make a sharp click, like a switchblade opening.

Sam Merlotte (Sam Trammell): He's a shape shifter who would, IMHO, make an excellent boyfriend. Most of the time he's a nice looking, slightly over protective bartender. Once a month he turns into a fluffy dog. Both incarnations are appealing, what's not to like? I just can't understand why Sookie doesn't fall for him. She's always so busy pining away for Bad Boy Bill!

Tara Thornton (Rutina Wesley): Sookie's BFF, Tara is the tough girl with a chip on her shoulder. Mom's a former alcoholic who made Tara's childhood Hell. When we last left her, Tara had joined some sort of a cult where she gets to live in a fancy mansion and eat petit dejeuner on the front patio. She carries a torch for Sookie's demented brother.

Jason Stackhouse (Ryan Kwanten): One taco short of a combo plate, Sookie's frere fou has gotten himself in more trouble Season One than you can shake a stick at. He's like a tom cat that is forever getting stuck at the top of a tree. Falsely accused of murder, addicted to vampire blood, his brain lives in his pants. But his stunning stupidity does provide some comic relief and he's devoutly loyal to sister Sookie.

Lafayette (Nelson Ellis): Possibly my favorite character, this is one Trannie you don't want to mess with. He's fierce, he's funny and he knows all about voodoo and Vampire blood. Lafayette brings sizzle to every scene.

Eric Northman (Alexander Skaarsgard): Introduced halfway through last season, Eric has become the breakout character causing the most buzz. A Swedish speaking 1000 year old Viking (yummy), he is the leader of the Vampire pack and not to be trusted for a second. Everyone is afraid of him. Even the other vampires.

Only one more day ....True Blood returns tomorrow night at 9pm eastern on HBO. Yippee! It's enough to wake the dead!

I've just watched the season premier. Forgive the pun, but you weren't just whistling Dixie with your predictions about the new True Blood. It's bigger, badder, sexier, SCARIER (the dungeon!) than ever before. Best of all it's funnier too. I dare not write more for fear of being a spoiler. It is nirvana for connoisseurs of fine TV. Alan Ball is my hero now. First Six Feet Under and now this....I don't even know how to define it.

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