Man, glad they cleared that up before “rumors or falsifications get out of hand. Unlike Orlando Bloom’s penis that was probably in the hand of this chick at a pre-Oscars party. Just to warn you, that chick isn’t Katy Perry. I can’t speculate on Orlando Bloom’s game, but he banged Selena Gomez and got this pregnant. Katy Perry is 32, kind of annoying, and looks like her left eye is finally gonna melt off after years of teasing us. A year with Orlando probably exceeded Taylor Swift’s voodoo doll’s expectations. Eh, there’s always John Mayer or a DJ.