Guilt

I'm am so lonely ..my husband is ill and had not really been abler to perform sexually in years.I have been findng myself searching for what I missing with other men.I have not done anything, but deep down given the chance I would

I hear you on that one. How to leave when illness (not lack of love) is at the root of the problem. But that doesn't make the passion and the desire to please that person, or at least receive pleasure yourself go away. I am trying to make the same decision.

Be honest, with him and with yourself. If you really wanted to, you would have by now. You are reaching out because you still hope for more. Go to him. Tell him your indiscretions, tell him your heart, let him hold it and feel what it needs. If your love is still there and so is his, you will both find the answer. I hope that your husband is better soon.

OK, if you are considering cheating then by default you are considering divorcing (think getting caught, think volcanicly angry spouse, think choice said volcanicly angry spouse would make).

Go and see a lawyer in your jurisdiction to see how a divorce would shake out for you. Now, armed with the relevant information, you can make an informed choice as to whether the upside of cheating is worth the downside. It is an entirely pragmatic choice you face, morals have nothing to do with it. You, and you alone supply the moral framework for your choice.

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