Simpsons Porn Story: Staggering Serendipities Chapter 4

AUTHORESS’S NOTE: I apologize for the delay in posting this chapter, but I haven’t been permitted much time with the stresses and strains of school and whatnot. Anyway, I hope this extra-long chapter was worth the wait. :) Thank you all for reading and reviewing! Every word is truly cherished. :) I hope you enjoy Chapter 4!

Mr. Burns almost immediately noticed that I had been glancing apprehensively at the clock every five minutes and questioned me after the third glance. Smithers, am I so boring and/or boorish today that you are just aching to take your break and feel the need to check the clock every single minute? he asked irritably.

I turned to Mr. Burns in surprise and stuttered, No, no, of course not, sir. I cherish every moment were together, its only thatwell, Im meeting someone on my break today and the impending intensity of the meeting is making me rather anxious.

Mr. Burns eyebrows raised in intrigue. Oh? Who is this mystery company?

I thrust my hands into the safety of my jacket pockets and looked away. Umits Maggie.

I waited in fear for Mr. Burns reaction. At first, he just stared at me illegibly with wide eyes. Maggie? As in, your ex-wife Maggie? I nodded. Then his brow furrowed in anger. Smithers, how could meet with that wretched woman? Youre not considering getting back together with her, are you? he exclaimed.

Well, no, I meanuhwe just have a lot to talk to about, I attempted. I shouldnt have told him. I knew he would react like this. Maggie and Mr. Burns had disliked each other intensely from the very beginning, although I could never understand why. They were actually quite similar in several respects and I would have thought they would have got on peaceably if not affably. However, Mr. Burns thought Maggie was a sleazy, Southern hick only after my money, and Maggie claimed that Mr. Burns was a decrepit, repulsive miser that had not the first idea about how to treat me. The war between them began early and continued for years, as they found more and more things to detest about each other. The war began early and much to my dismay was now was resuming.

Smithers, that woman is no good, I tell you. And I only tell you as your friend, he said, pulling at my heartstrings. You deserve the best woman there is, and she is not it, Waylon.

I smiled unsurely. Thank you, Mr. Burns, but I do need to talk to her. Not about getting back together, I assure you. Its justwell, she has something and it might be mine and well I couldnt tell Mr. Burns that I had a son. Or that I might have one. Not yet. Not before I knew for sure. Umlet me meet with her and Ill tell you all about it this afternoon when we go golfing, okay?

Mr. Burns looked at me unsatisfied but nodded. All right. Just be wary of her charms. She certainly has some.

I nodded. I will. Thank you, sir.

———————

Maggie picked me up promptly outside the plant, as punctuality was one of her many strengths. We rode in her car in silence except for the smooth jazz music playing on the stereo and the heavy drumming of rain against the windows. I looked out the windows instead of looking at my former love, watching the rare Springfield rain pour in hefty slants down from the dark, metallic skies. When we arrived at a quaint coffee shop, Maggie suggested, Shall we sit outside?

But its raining, Maggie, I argued.

Exactly, she said as she led to us to a table under an umbrella. I dodged the bullets of rain tumbling down as I sat while Maggie stood for a moment under them, looking to the sky wistfully. I couldnt believe that in the eight years since our divorce, I had almost forgotten who Maggie was: a free spirit with a love for her life. How I had always envied her that.

Finally, Maggie smiled once more at the rain-laden world, sighed, and took her seat. I stared at her in something like awe, I suppose. What are you doing looking me at like, Waylon?

Like what? I asked embarrassedly.

Like you were just doing, she tried, meeting my stare and conquering it.

I looked away. I wasnt looking at you in any particular way, Maggie. Now, can we talk? I really have to be back to work soon.

There was still a slight, sly, and suspicious smile plastered on her face as she nodded. All right, Waylon. How has your life been?

Although I sincerely desired to bypass this talk and get to discussing our son, I humored her and said, My life has been fine. Rather good, actually.

You and Mr. Burnsyoure a couple now, I suppose? she inquired frankly.

I was fortunate I wasnt drinking coffee at that moment, for I was rather certain I would have spit it out in shock. Maggie, keep your voice down, I demanded.

She looked genuinely confused. What? Its okay if you are. You can tell me. Its not like Im still in love with you. Truly, Im over it, and I expected just as much when you left me for him.

I didnt leave you for him, I began to protest.

Oh, no? Maggie asked sardonically. Then why did you leave me? Because I always thought that it was because you stopped loving me and started loving that wicked, old man.

I sighed. I couldnt lie to her anymore. She had known the truth about my feelings for Mr. Burns as long as I had, I suppose. I never stopped loving you, I said honestly. But you are right. I did start loving Mr. Burns, I admitted in a low voice.

Maggie attempted to veil her emotions and said flatly, So, you finally admit it. Thank God, Waylon. It only took you eight years. I sat silently, hurt by Maggies words or my own or something I wasnt even sure of. She noticed this and said in a softer voice, Do you mind if I inquire what his reaction was when you admitted it to him?

I looked up at her. I dont mind if you inquire, but I have no answer for you.

Are you telling me you never told him? exclaimed Maggie incredulously.

Sighing yet again, I said, Yes, thats what Im telling you.

For a moment, we sat there in quietude, until Maggie looked at me with sheer confusion and asked simply: Why?

Why? Why didnt I tell him? I asked. Maggie nodded. I sighed, and knowing that even I didnt truly know the answer to that question, I said, Oh, Maggie, I thought we came here to talk about Eldridge, not my pathetic life.

As her brilliant, emerald eyes filled with apology, she said, Im sorry, Waylon. I was only wondering. Thats all. I mean, Im just confused! I thought that Mr. Burns had offered himself to you years ago when we were still married, and well, you made your choice, clarified Maggie.

I shook my head. No, it wasnt quite like that. I dont know what it was like.

Another silence prevailed until Maggie bluntly proclaimed, Eldridge is your son, Waylon, but I dont expect anything from you. I never did, thats why I chose not to tell you. I didnt want your pity or your money or anything else. I just wanted to move on and raise my son without you and Mr. Burns and this whole ugly thing that was between us. I hope you understand.

So it is official. You have a son and you never knew him at all. Maggie, how could you not tell me?! Hes my son. I had more than a right to know!

Im sorry, I just thought it would be best for everyone she trailed off.

I shook my head in anger and disbelief. Its not best for everyone. Eldridge needs a father and believe it or not, I would have been a great one to him.

Maggie scoffed and said irately, Sure you would have. You would have been just a great role model with your assassinations and your illegal affairs and your working for the evilest man in town. Thats exactly how I wanted Eldridge to grow up, around Mr. Burns and the awful man that he was turning you into!

I riposted furiously, Mr. Burns and I are two separate people, Maggie, and you know that I would never put our son in harms way. I would have loved him, damn it. Then I stopped for a moment and softened my tone. And I will love him. I will know him. I need to know him, Maggie. You must understand that.

She looked away, out to the rain that was now dying down. I know, Waylon. He needs to know you as well. The you that I had always known. But I mean what I say. He needs to know you. Then she looked into my eyes. But he will never know Mr. Burns.