Being single in your 20's

Being single on your 20’s is totally okay is not the end of the world feeling that you will be an old hag and die alone with 20 something cats in some small apartment in New York City.

Many of us are still single for whatever the reason and we haven’t found the right person and you know that totally okay it gives us times for ourselves. We do feel the pressure of the society telling us to go and find our Prince Charming, your shiny knight or whatever and we see our friends having lots of dates or already have a partner, but you will find someone someday maybe not today but somewhere soon you will finally meet someone whom you can connect with.

Here are things that made me realize being single in my 20’s.

Many of us will be moving different direction and that is okay

I read an article on bustle which I will be putting a link down below and I quote “There will be times when you might be pulled in one direction or another.” – Lea Rose Mary

I do sometimes feel that I’m like stuck when it comes to my love life like I can’t find the right person and that I will be all alone and see my friends being with their partners being so lovey-dovey makes me want to crawl and hide under my sheet but then I remember one time I have this professor where she told me and my other classmate to go and travel without any commitment you will discover so much about yourself and to be honest I want to do what she is doing travelling around the world seeing a lot of history in the old country and just enjoy life and not to worry about being single.

I never have ever…

Okay, I never have ever had sex ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it totally okay that you never got your first date, kiss, sex, love confession or just anything in general. You’re still discovering yourself. Love your self-don’t go in a pity party because you didn't get your first kiss at the age of 15 or 16 or never been asked to go to a prom so don’t shame yourself for not having those things you will get it maybe not the prom unless you’re still in High School, but I mean like a first kiss so enjoy yourself while being single.

Don’t lower your expectation

Seriously, don’t. Don’t you ever, ever lower your expectation. You’re so much worth than what you are putting up too. Don’t just go with someone who is not attractive in your eyes, don’t just swipe all rights on your tinder account that doesn’t mean stop dating but don’t just randomly go with some guy or girl that you are not even into. Yeah, I’m picky too I do have my ideal men just like everyone else but for me, one of the important trait from physical to intelligence is that he must be taller than me. (I’m 5’8) and there are moments when I decided to wear wedges and high heels, must speak around 2-3 languages, good at math because in the end who will help me do my taxes? And last and not least must be able to carry me. That just my ideal partner.

Put yourself first.

This one is similar like ‘don’t lower your expectation’ You need to learn to love yourself and many of us who are still in our 20’s is still in college, have a crappy job or unemployed and looking for a job, around the 80% still live with their parents and the 99% are broke AF (hey, that me!). Go to a local coffee shop and order some coffee and just chill or invite some of your friends or talks to barista, I know it sounds very cliché but I’ve met so many wonderful people in a coffee shop and they tell me their story like one of my favorite barista told me his mission impossible searching and travelling across the island to buy himself a PS4 another is an old lady who retired who knows how long tells me her youth moments when she and her husband met, her travels, her long family that are all gingers and her artwork and other people that I have met along there.

Dating

Be open and go have some fun doesn’t mean that you will have to be their boyfriend or girlfriend to that person just keep meeting people and who knows you may find the right person. Maybe your first date was horrendous because that person is nothing like their Tinder profile except the picture because you used to watch Catfish from MTV and you are no fool to that, but their bio is nothing resembling their personality. You are not the first nor the last that have or had a bad date been there and survived and every time I think about my bad date I just laugh it off with my friends telling them about the ‘soup’ and try to scare me with a horrible scary movie that wasn’t ever scary. In the end just be open maybe you went on a date and it went well…

In the end

Even if you are no longer in your 20’s and still single that doesn’t mean that you’re a boring and not an attractive person. Life is strange that for sure and society likes to rub us their expectations in our faces but all I can say is love yourself, learn new things in life if you don’t feel like ready to mingle that totally cool no need to mingle. One of the important parts of life is loving yourself.

4 comments

Such an awesome post!I mean, I can relate cause this is basically me haha Lowering expectations and never-have-I-ever part really got to me and it is really well written!although, it's harder to explain to your grandma why you're still not married hahanice job!

I myself believe in fate and that things happens for a reason and that someday we will in a weird way find the right person. And that the more we try to find someone the more frogs we find and not the prince. I do like fairytales too so xD