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A little harsh don't you think? I don't mind them. They're pretty good compared to some. Granted Vern has a man crush on every hyped player on the field and since there will be no Tebow. Manziel or Murray he should be ok for this game.

Is it illegal to put every player on IV's the night before to ensure hydration and push electrolytes?

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no its not illegal put they will usually do it before warm-ups and halftimes or as needed ... they players usually start have/pushing gatorades starting friday during their walk through, at meals, at the hotels and then all day gameday