A reader brought this Bryce Harper Q&A to our attention. In it Harper expresses his disdain for high school. While that's bad—albeit expected—there's some other terrible stuff in the interview. Let's look at the highlights.

Stunning Moment Of Arrogance Laughed Off And Replaced With An Even More Stunning Moment Of Arrogance: Asked to described himself in one word, Harper responds: "Gorgeous. No (laughing). If I had to describe myself in one word, Hercules. I guess..."

On Getting A Boner In Slow-Motion: "I think I grew like an inch in a month."

Moment You Remember He Is Only 17 And Sounds Like Every Single Other Disaffected Teenager, But Then You Remember He's Pretty Wealthy Now So Fuck That: "I was like a ghost. I went to school, but nobody really noticed me. I just came to school, didn't dress up or anything—just a ghost. I just worked out and went out to the field and went the baseball route. That's how I've always been my whole life."

Bryce Harper: goth kid. Somebody get him some black coffee and a Live Journal account.