Facebook Launches New Social Platform Where People Meet in Person and Speak to Each Other

After the Facebook family of social media platforms experienced hours of outages on Wednesday, CEO Mark Zuckerberg announced the company would be launching a new social platform which involves people meeting in person and speaking to one another.

“We call it ‘Face-to-Facebook,'” said Zuckerberg. “I think it’s going to revolutionize the way we view social media.”

Many investors have criticized the initiative, believing that people are not yet ready to adopt such a complex technology which involves human interaction and social skills. Many long-time Instagram users are also skeptical.

“I don’t know. This doesn’t really make sense to me,” said influencer @crazy_gun.chickXO. “How do I like and share people’s stories? And what if I get annoyed and want to unfollow someone? I don’t think it will work.”

Zuckerberg, however, is confident the platform will be a success.

“We want to distinguish this from previous unsuccessful apps we’ve developed, such as ‘Conversation’ and ‘Meaningful Relationships 2.0.’ This platform will be much more robust,” said Zuckerberg. “Just imagine – all of the friends you know from Facebook and Instagram, but now you can smell them, and touch them, and they’re the same size as you.”