The News In Shorts

How the news would look if everyone stopped waffling and told the truth.

Wednesday, 29 February 2012

Cameron Refuses Petition To Debate The NHS Bill.

David Cameron, desperate to avoid any more "unpleasantness" about the NHS, has disallowed a petition to discuss the NHS Reform Bill on the basis that "it's been debated enough." We asked the world's most stupid political leader to explain why; "Why? Because I could well lose it for a start off and, even if I can corale enough craven MP's to support it, they might bring up something about the bill that I don't want ordinary people to know. We are not trying to privatise the NHS - we've already effectively done that - we are merely trying to introduce a measure of competition so we can glum as much money out of it for ourselves and our mates as we can. I'm sick of talking about this bloody bill when all that lovely money is going to waste on the old and the sick."