While host Jon Stewart expressed a belief that Senators Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio would be the party’s ace in the hole with the Latino community, Madrigal dismissed them out of hand.

“Eh. I guess those guys are technically Latinos,” Madrigal explained. “I mean there is a lot more to being Latino then just being Latino. Mainly because they’re Cuban. Really a small, and I gotta be honest, snooty subset. They’re like the WASP’s of the Latino world.”

Madrigal then pointed out that Cruz “is actually from Canada.”

Madrigal went on to “tell the tale of the legend of a candidate for president who speaks fluent Spanish, and has a Mexican wife who raised Mexican children, and regularly eats Mexican food. And this man is a Republican.”

“John, the legend is real. And his name is ‘Yeb.’ Or as we call him: ‘el Jebe,’ ” as music from “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly” played in the background.

Madrigal went on to praise Bush’s foresight by pointing out that he married his wife back in 1974 saying, “He literally married into the demographic,” before adding “His wife Columba Bush represents us all, Jon, and ‘Yeb’ know it.”

About the Author

Tom Boggioni is based in the quaint seaside community of Pacific Beach in less quaint San Diego. He writes about politics, media, culture, and other annoyances. Mostly he spends his days at the beach gazing at the horizon waiting for the end of the world, or the sun to go down. Whichever comes first.