Homer: Mmm…Horse doovers.Marge: [slaps Homer’s hand] Homer! You promised.Homer: I promised I wouldn’t eat? Never! You lie!– The War of the Simpsons (The Simpsons Season 2 – Episode 20)

Around the holidays you will invariably either host or be invited to party, which means horse doovers will be served. Preparing horse doovers can be a lot of work and people might not always appreciate all the effort you put in. For example, making little sandwiches that spell out “Enjoy Our Party Snacks” is a lot of work and not really worth it because as soon as somebody eats a few sandwiches (which they should, sandwiches are for eating) your message is ruined anyway. What I’m trying to say is that making the Enjoy Our Party Snacks / Boy Our Party Sucks Appetizers took me over an hour of finagling with bread and toothpicks and I got mustard everywhere…whoa, I had mustard?!

Ingredients:

2 Loaves of White Bread

Lettuce

500 Grams of Deli Meat (I used ham and turkey)

Mayonnaise and Mustard (to taste)

Toothpicks

Directions:

Make sandwiches first. Add mayo and mustard to bread, place lettuce and deli meat on bread…do I really need to explain how to make a sandwich? Next, cut off the crusts and cut the sandwiches into strips. It is very important that you cut off the crusts AFTER making the sandwich, plus then you have all these little “mini sandwiches” that you can eat while you work. You might also notice that I used Wonder Bread for the sandwiches. The Simpson family strikes me as Wonder Bread people, but any white bread will do.

Each sandwich made 4 finger sandwiches that I used to spell out the message. In the end I had to make 11 sandwiches to get all the necessary components for the correct spelling. Results may vary depending on how you cut and how much room you have. I ended up needing my entire kitchen counter, no way this would have fit on a platter as depicted in the episode.

The sandwiches were tasty, the presentation was neat but as I said the whole thing smacks of effort, man. You would get the exact same taste if you just cut the sandwiches into fours.

Cromulence: 7 General Sherman’s out of 10

Enjoy Our Party Snacks / Boy Our Party Sucks Appetizers Recipe from: The War of the Simpsons (The Simpsons Season 2 – Episode 20)