Will You Be Struck by a New York City Subway Train This Year?

How many people do you reckon were hit by subway trains in New York City last year? Five? Eleven? Fourteen? Twenty-six? Thirty-seven? Forty? Forty-two? Forty-three? Forty-five? Forty-eight? Fifty-one? Any of those numbers? How about fifty-four, then? Fifty-five? Fifty-nine? Yes? Well, you're wrong.

Last year, 146 people were struck by subway trains, with 47 killed... The statistic for riders hit includes people struck while leaning over from the platform and those who deliberately climbed onto the tracks to retrieve dropped cellphones, purses and other personal items.

One hundred and forty six is a lot of people being struck by subway trains, even if you subtract all the stupid tourists who were all, "Deloris, take a picture of my head with the train coming in the background!" Well now the MTA is solving this problem—caused almost completely by our own stupidity—by putting up new posters all over subway stations that say, "Don't Become a Statistic." A little vague, no? They continue: "Standing at the platform edge is dangerous!" Yeah, well, "life is dangerous," say the jaded New Yorkers. Finally, the poster concludes, "Be Safe. Be Smart. Stand Back." Then there is a cartoon illustration of some dude leaning over the edge. It's all so third-gradey.

Instead, how about a photo of someone who has just been struck by a subway train with a caption reading, "He was a jaded New Yorker JUST LIKE YOU." Anyone caught making fun of the posters will be pushed onto the tracks by an MTA employee. Some people have to learn safety the hard way.