The things people like about likeable people

The age old question, definitely if you are a teenager: “How do I get others to like me?”. Much has been written about the topic so let me also throw in my 5 cents worth.

Getting others to like you is a skill like riding a horse or learning how to drive a car. Some people have a knack for it but ultimately it is a skill and like all skill, it can be learnt. Master the following 5 skills and you will be well on your way. Remember, this is not a quick fix but a process of learning.

The other is who matters. People who constantly talk about themselves are an irritation to most and just down right obnoxious to the others. When engaging with people make sure you are asking questions about their lives and not talking about yours!

Are you genuine? Most people act from a self-centred perspective without even knowing it. The question you need to ask yourself is “Am I what I say?” Most people are not! This trait is unfortunately not something you can fix or learn. It is a heart attitude. You need to want to be genuine.

Are you an attention seeker? You can generally hear from people’s repeated use of the words “I” and “me” as to how self-absorbed they are. We live in an age of self-absorbs ion. When you catch yourself using these two words more than a dozen times in a conversation, do yourself a favour and stop and ask the question: ”How about you. What is happening in your life?” People will like you a lot better!

They smile. Not difficult. If it is really a stretch think of a funny conversation you have recently had or a joke you heard. That should help. Positive body signals like smiling goes a long way in making you a likeable person

They touch people (and know when not to). This is something my wife taught me as it conveys empathy and connectedness. A slight touch on the shoulder or the hand is all that is needed. Care must be taken with this action as you need to be in the right relation to the person you are touching for it not to be weird. People will find you more accessible when you occasionally touch them.

Start with these five. We can catch up later to progress further in making you a thoroughly likeable person!