Saturday, June 28, 2014

2) Jesus is a merciful father to His children even when they are in the wrong. (John 8:1-11)

3) The Lord Jesus prepares his own meals. (John 21:9-12)

4) The LORD wipes away tears from His children's faces. (Isaiah 25:8)

5) The LORD sets the table for His family to eat. (Psalm 23:5)

6) Jesus is a long suffering, patient parent who shows perfect love to His children, even when they don't exhibit the same feeling back to Him. (John 21:15-17)7) Jesus is a parent who would go without food and water to care for His children. (Matthew 4:1-2)8) Jesus uses the example of quiet correction for sin. (John 8:1-11)9) Jesus is a father who is ready to bind up our wounds. (Matthew 9:20)10) Jesus is a parent who would die (and did die) for His children to keep them safe. (The message of the Gospel).

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Recently,
I had the pleasure of visiting the island of Malta. What an amazing experience
that was. I really enjoyed it. It was so wonderful on a whole number of
levels" the people, the architecture, the climate, the geography, the
language, the sea. Great all the way around.

Now,
I enjoy islands. I have always been fascinated by islands. Generally speaking,
I am not too keen about living on an island (I am personally much more
comfortable in Jerusalem at 2,500 feet above sea level), but I have fond
memories of some trips to islands. I remember going to Maui once when I was
about eight and I loved that trip. I hope to go again to visit Hana in Maui
again one day.

So
my recent experiences have helped me a little bit I think to put some of my own
Biblical studies in perspective and it gives a good opportunity perhaps for
some teaching.

Now,
on my recent trip to Malta, I was very interested to learn that Malta (the
country) is in fact made up of several islands. I know this because when I
visited Malta, I spent most of my time in Gozo. Now, most people who have never
visited Malta have never heard of Gozo because Gozo is a smaller island just to
the west of the main island of Malta.

Now
the people who live in Gozo are just as much Maltese as those who live on the
main island of Malta, but rest assured they are very different people. They are
much more conservative and more religious in fact. But, here is a point that I
think we can all relate to.

The
point is, if you wish to understand Malta, you would not for one minute think
that arriving in the airport on Malta, getting in a taxi, driving to the ferry
and crossing to Gozo, spending two weeks in Gozo travelling up and down and talking
to people all over Gozo and then think after that, that you could just return
to the airport and come home and tell all your friends that you now understand
everything about Malta? Hardly.

One
could say the exact same thing about the Hawaiian islands. Maui and Oahu are
different in some cases different as daylight and dark.

Let's
not stop there.

I
have also visited Cyprus before. It is another beautiful island in the
Mediterranean. However, were a person to only visit a certain part of Cyprus they
might only get a certain part of the story of what life on Cyprus is like. Why
is this? It is because the northern end of Cyprus is a part of Turkey, so one
could visit northern Cyprus and get a whole different point of view on what
life on Cyprus is like.

Now,
islands are beautiful and wonderful, but we can see I think that visiting an
island has many issues connected to it if we wish to develop an accurate
understanding of the individual island itself or a collection of islands.

Now,
how does all of this relate to the Bible and to our understanding of it? Very
much if we just have "eyes to see" and "ears to hear."

Using
an "Island" oriented approach to Biblical understanding

So,
now let's look at an example of how potentially dangerous this whole issue of
this kind of limited approach of compartmentalization (like visiting an island)
can be when we talk about the Bible. Unfortunately, this type of approach to
the Bible is so common and widespread, but be warned of these types of practitioners of
"island theology". What they may be teaching may be fine, but we need
to make sure that we are getting the whole picture of life on the island and not
just being directed to a small corner of the island and being told that this is
all we need to know about that island.

The
"Spanking" texts in Proverbs and an "island" mentality
among many Biblical interpreters when it comes to them

Now,
most of you reading this post will have encountered well intentioned Christian
interpreters of the Bible who will home in a few Bible texts in the book of Proverbs
(10:13, 13:24, 19:18, 22:15, 23:13,14 and 29:15) as their main authorities for
their approaches to child rearing and for the absolute necessity to follow the
face value information in these texts according to how they interpret them for
you the reader.

Now,
this approach really resembles someone who visits Hawaii (the subject of child
rearing in the Bible), goes directly to Hana, Maui (these texts in Proverbs)
and leaves and then thinks that they know everything there is to know about
Hawaii (biblical child rearing).

I
think we can all see how potentially dangerous, reckless and in fact ridiculous
this potentially is. Let's look a little deeper into the whole
subject of Hawaii (child rearing in the Bible) by taking a fuller trip around
all the Hawaiian Islands (the entire Bible) to help us develop a more accurate
picture of this subject.

For
more information on the subject of corporal punishment/spanking/smacking in the
context of the Bible, please download my free ebook here
- whynottrainachild.com/2013/06/22/download-martins-book/

Monday, June 09, 2014

We may not realize it so well on the surface, but we, I think are
all aware of what I am talking about here.

It is those good old Bible teachers and even well intentioned lay
people who use those wonderful phrases like:

"Just tell me what the Bible says!"

"I am a Biblical guy. I just like the plain and simple,
straightforward meaning of Scripture."

"I prefer a literal interpretation of the Bible!"

"The Bible means what it says!" (one of my favorites)

"The Bible interprets itself"

"If the King James Version was good enough for Jesus, it's
good enough for me!"

These are just a few phrases that I have heard over the years (and
regularly continue to hear) from well intention brothers and sisters in the
Lord who really mean well, but these types of statements can represent a
very dangerous approach to the Bible.

Let's see this in a practical sense.

I was engaging recently in a discussion on Facebook and a person
said the following talking about what the Bible "says" in Proverbs
13:24:

"This is
what it says in Proverbs 13:24 "He that spareth his rod hateth his son:
but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes." (quoting the King James
Version here) However you discipline your children is up to the parents.
Interpret the scripture any way you desire, it’s not my words."

It is clear from
this comment that this dear friend in the Lord simply just reads the text as
his beginning and ending point of attempting to develop any understanding of
what the text may mean. How unfortunate this is. How simplistic this is. How
almost disrespectful this. Yet how widespread and common this approach is.

What I am going to suggest is that well intentioned people who
take these approaches to Biblical understanding are potentially riding on the
spiritual Titanic and they do not know what they are doing and how damaging it
might be. We all remember what happened to the Titanic. It hit an iceberg.

Now, iceberg's often are very small and inconsequential if looked at just from the top, but get underneath them and there is a whole different picture. Here is where I think we can have some teaching about what I call "Tip of the Iceberg" theological thinking.

So, let's see a very specific example to this issue of "Tip
of the Iceberg" theological thinking. It is an extreme example, but if you
were to Google this idea, you would come up with hundreds of examples of people
pointing to this text and interpreting it literally.

The text we are going to focus on is that found in Deuteronomy
chapter 21:18-21. It concerns the so-called “stubborn and rebellious” son.

The text reads: “If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son,
which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and
that, when they have chastened him, will not hearken unto them: Then shall his
father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of the
city, and unto the gate of his place; And they shall say unto the elders of his
city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he
is a glutton, and a drunkard. And all the men of his city shall stone him with
stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel
shall hear, and fear.”

Now, this text seems so clear and simple to understand. This is
what so many people think. This text is quoted constantly by many people I come into contact with showing that we need to be tough with children in particular. Look at how
someone might understand this. Here is something I just found on Google which
is a good illustration of what I am talking about.

"My son is 16
years old and he has been acting rebellious lately. I've asked him to do his
chores yet he refuses to do them. He's even been drinking alcohol at parties. I
read the Bible a lot and I'm a very devoted Christian. So I get my morals from
the Bible. As a god-fearing man I'm scared because the Bible says that I should
stone my son to death for not obeying my commands in Deuteronomy 21:18-21. I'm
really scared because I don't want to have to kill my son. I love God more than
anyone else though so I try my best to follow his laws."

Pretty extreme that
in this day and age that someone would entertain such an idea, but in fact,
these ideas are widespread and one could see how such an idea could possibly
get out of hand and even be used by some to justify very serious (even violent) acts against a
child.

This is what I call
"Tip of the Iceberg" theological thinking. It just looks at a little
"tip" of something which is so much bigger, so much broader, so much
deeper, so much more substantial than many may have ever considered.

So let's take a look
at this text and see how big, broad, deep and substantial it is.

Point Number One -
The Death Penalty in Judaism

Now it is clear in
this text that we are talking about the death penalty. A capital offense!
Pretty serious stuff. Not something to be undertaken without some very serious
consideration and deliberation.

Now, here is a quote
about this issue from my own "Thy Rod and Thy Staff, They Comfort Me:
Christians and the Spanking Controversy" from page 134:

"First, the death penalty
was imposed only when the Temple in Jerusalem was in existence. “Under
Jewish Law capital punishment was imposed only when the Temple was still
in existence, when the offerings were still brought to
the altar, and when the Sanhedrin still sat in the Chamber of Hewn Stones
(in the Temple). 346 This means that no matter what this text says,
following the destruction of the Temple in AD 70 by the Romans, this text
has never even once been applied to anyone."

Another point that we have to
understand concerns the rarity of the death penalty itself in Judaism:

"Second, death sentences were not
every day occurrences. We need not to rely on the images of colorful
Hollywood films that perpetuate historical inaccuracies. We need to
examine the historical documents to teach us what was indeed taking place
based upon eyewitness testimony. Note the following: “the death sentence
was imposed only after much investigation and deliberation on the part of
the court of justice. The judges made every effort to avoid imposing
capital punishment. Circumstantial evidence was not accepted in trials
for a capital offence and once the defendant in the such a case had been
acquitted, he could not be brought to trial again for the same offence,
even if direct evidence had turned up in the meantime to prove his guilt.” (ibid.)

Point Number Two - This text only took
place in a court environment

If we refer back to the text above
where the father is taking it upon himself to interpret the Bible himself, we
will see, if we look more carefully at this matter, that this text is not to be
understood as something that one could take into his own hands. It only is to
be understood as taking place in a clear legal environment! This after all is a
law and laws are only understood to be administered by courts and under the
control and auspices of legally mandated authorities. To think that people in
ancient times just simply took wayward children out and stoned them to death
simply because dad thought junior was a little out of control is just absolute
ridiculous nonsense, yet such ideas (as I said earlier) are so widespread and
common beliefs among some well intentioned (but misinformed) Christians. (Let us also be clear. Christians don't
just come up with these ideas on their own. Often such information is
transmitted by well-intentioned but seriously misinformed religious
authorities.)

Note the following:

"It must be pointed out here that
we are speaking about a Jewish cultural background. This quote refers to
“judges,” the Court of Justice,” “defendants,” and a “case.” These terms
must be understood as referring to courts that were in existence to
adjudicate matters of law and in this case we are talking about matters of
Jewish religious law. In addition, on reading this quote, some may be
reminded of the concept of “double jeopardy” which is
a component of our modern Western judicial systems. Jewish legal scholars
have known about “double jeopardy” for over 2000 years and it was applied
in ancient times." (ibid. pgs. 134-135)

The Death Penalty was so serious major
efforts took place to avoid it

When you read the text about the
Stubborn and Rebellious Son it comes across as so every day and so commonplace
and something which people were seemingly doing on a regular basis. Yet this is
so far from the truth. Note the following also:

"We find other sources making
even stronger cases against the death penalty. Note the following: “Should
the court find that the homicide was deliberate, sentence of death was
passed; but there was great reluctance to resort to capital punishment and
every endeavor was made to avoid it. Indeed, it was remarked: ‘A Sanhedrinwhich executed a person once in seven
years was called destructive. Rabbi Eleazar ben Azariah said, ‘Once in
seventy years. Rabbi Tarphon and Rabbi Akiba said, If we were members of a
Sanhedrin, never would a person be put to death.’” So, we see that the death
penalty itself had very strict rules and regulations associated with it."
(ibid. pg. 135)

Point Number Three - The Stubborn and
Rebellious Son - How Old?

Now in the example above given by the
father, he refers to a 16 year old son as meeting the criteria in his mind for
the designation "Stubborn and Rebellious Son". But isn't it
interesting. The text does not indicate an age. So who decides according to the
Bible? The father? The mother? Hardly.

"Next, what constituted a
“stubborn and rebellious son?” There is no age mentioned in the text, so
who decides? Rabbi Chill shows that “who is considered a ‘stubborn
and rebellious son’? Any young man three months past bar mitzvah age…”
This means that this punishment was never inflicted on anyone below the age
of 13 years three months."

This matter has been established by authorized legal authorities and is to be understood as a part of interpreting this law.

Point Number Four - Death Penalty for
the First Offense? No!

So, if we refer back to our father
whose first thought that comes to mind is taking his son out and stoning him to
death, how does this square with practice in ancient times? It really doesn't
make any sense at all. Here's why:

"Rabbi Chill points out that the
death penalty was not the first solution to a family choosing to apply
this law to their child. “The first offence reported by the parents made
the boy subject to flogging; if he repeated the offence and was again brought
to the court by his parents he received the death penalty – execution by
stoning.” So, we can see that ancient Israelites were not taking their
children out and stoning them to death every time a boy ate too much or
drank some wine. There was strict due process involved and those accused of
these crimes had legal rights before the law." (ibid.)

Point Number Five - Mitigating
Circumstances

When we look at this approach of this
dad to the 16 year old and we review similar ideas held by many people today,
we feel there is a very simplistic, one size fits all approach with no rhyme or
reason, no individuality and certainly no exceptions. But wait a minute? How
does this square up with historical fact? Let's see:

"Not only that, if one of his
parents was lame, blind or deaf, or if one of his parents was unwilling to
have him brought to court, the offender was exempt from the death penalty.
This meant, in effect, that the death penalty for a ‘stubborn and
rebellious son’ was very rarely carried out.” (ibid.)

Point Number Six - Who is to really to
blame? Only the child? Again No!

When we once again go back to the dad
of the 16 year old, we get this feeling that this guy is absolving himself of
all responsibility. A child going and drinking alcohol and parties? And where
is dad? Apparently not running after his son!

Biblical authorities will have none of
this. A death penalty sentence on a child will never happen unless it can be
demonstrated that the son is really himself a "bad apple", but for
him to be shown to be a "bad apple," the parents have to demonstrate that they
have done everything right in the eyes of a court. Note this idea:

"We also find that the child
himself was not the only one on trial. The great medieval Jewish scholar
Maimonides placed some of the blame for “stubborn and rebellious sons”
squarely on the parents. “How does a son become ‘stubborn and rebellious’?
Through the fault of the parents who are too permissive and permit him to
lead a life of irresponsibility.” Parents who did not guide their children were
a part of the problem and contributed to their children becoming “stubborn
and rebellious.” Two giants of Jewish scholarship further echo this idea.
Rabbi Moses Al Sheikh said: “He explains why the Torah insists that
parents personally bring their ‘stubborn and rebellious son’ to the court
of justice. In this manner, he says, the parents acknowledge that they are
to blame for the way in which their son has turned out. No child becomes
intractable from one day to the next. The process begins when the child is
at a very early age when many parents, unfortunately, tend to view such behavior
as ‘just a phase.’ This is a mistaken notion, and the parents are now
asked to face the fact that they failed their child when he was in the
greatest need of their guidance.”

Rabbi Ibn Ezra puts it a little bit
stronger placing some of the blame on the parents: “He is not prepared to
place the burden of responsibility entirely on the child. The son can be
justifiably tried and punished for his behavior only if the conduct of his
parents themselves has been beyond reproach. If they did not provide a
good example for him to emulate, they have no right to bring him to court
for ‘stubborn

and rebellious’ conduct.” So what we
find is that not only the son is on trial, the parents as well have to
demonstrate that they did the right things. If not, no death penalty will
ever be inflicted." (ibid. pg. 138)

So, were I one of the judges for the
16 year olds' dad above, the first question I would ask is: "Where were you
when your son was allegedly out drinking alcohol? Seems were you
taking a bit more care, he would be at home where most 16 year olds' belong,
especially in this day and age."

To conclude, clearly, this dad (and
many others out there) needs to rethink his approach to not only Deuteronomy chapter 21:18-21, but also to
how well he is connected to his 16 year old. Perhaps were he to do that, he'd be
thinking more about the hand that draws near rather than the hand that pushes
away.

Finally, let me close with a comment that I got on my blog in
response to a post I did which is linked here:

This post is guaranteed to minister to your soul. It certainly has to mine! Thanks SR!

"I have
discovered that with parenting, a good defense is the best offense. When I take
the time to know my children and set them up to succeed, most of those
tension-filled moments when I am tempted to spank disappear.

One of the
most beautiful passages in the Bible is Psalm 139, where David illustrates the
intimacy God the Father has with His child. The first four verses read:

1 OLord, you havesearched me and known me!2 Youknow when I sit down and when I rise
up;youdiscern my thoughts from afar.3 You
search out my path and my lying downand are acquainted with all my ways.4 Even
before a word is on my tongue,behold, OLord,you know it altogether.

This reminds
me of how I know my own sons. I know what time they go to bed, and I know when
they get up. I can tell you the order they will wake up, too, because it is
almost always the same. I know what they’re thinking and what they enjoy. I
know who likes apples, who likes fish, who likes juice, and who my chocolate
milk drinker is. I don’t even have to ask them their preferences on so many
things because I already know what they will choose. Sometimes they think they
want something and I respond, “No, you won’t like that.” How do I know? Because
I know them even better than they know themselves. This is how God is toward
us, and it makes life so much better.

The key to
all of this is the first verse where we find that God has “searched me and
known me!” God desires to know us and have a relationship with us. This makes
all of the other elements of our lives easier. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 10:13
that “God is faithful, andhe will not let you be tempted
beyond your ability.” But how does He know our abilities? Because He knows us.

As a father, I can bless my children so much by searching
them and truly knowing them. Then I will know what they like and don’t like. I
will know what will trigger outbursts of anger or feelings of being left out. I
will know how to calm a situation and bring about peace between squabbling
siblings. I will help prevent those tempting situations where they will seem
out of control and when they say and do things I know they do not mean. I parent
like God when I do not allow them to be tempted (put into situations) they cannot
handle. One recent example of a change we have made in this regard is avoiding
food coloring and artificial flavors. These tend to make my kids act too hyper
and dramatic. We like to celebrate and give treats, but we avoid the ones that
will make it difficult for them. This is not “babying” them; this is setting
them up to succeed.

Finally, David
says to God in Psalms 139:5 that “Youhem me in, behind and before, andlay your hand upon me.” This is how I
strive to be. I try to surround my children with opportunities to succeed and
be safe. I try to make it easy for them to be “good.” And in the process, I try
to place my hand on them to let them know I am there and I love them no matter
what.

After hearing it over and over again, I finally saw that what
we might call "that still small voice", "mother's
intuition", a "moral center" or however one wishes to define it
is so important for mothers to listen to and heed.

Of course, in the context that I heard about mother's
intuition, it was always in the context that the mother's I was hearing from
were saying things like spanking "never felt right", "didn't sit
well with me", "I did it against my will", etc. I have heard
this same message scores of times and one can easily search the web for these
phrases and one will come up with dozens of blogs with mothers saying exactly
the same thing.

We can see stories these days all over the web of the guilt
and shame mothers felt when they listened to the advice of well-intentioned but
often misguided religious leaders telling women messages that were
diametrically opposed to what their own motherly voices or personal intuitions
were telling them and guiding them.

Thankfully, today, many more mothers are open to listening
to these voices because a new environment of women's empowerment exists which
in times past just did not exist.

Join me in here sitting at the feet of some great teachers
who I am deeply honored to learn from. These messages are words spoken by
sincere God loving Christian women who call on the name of the Lord Jesus with
the deepest reverence. Let these words minister to you as they have to me
because they come from a very special place in the heart of a Christian mother.

What you will find here is truthful, simple, practical,
elegant, lovely thoughts that will touch your soul.

To find my name mentioned among these words is indeed a
deeply special honor which I find so touching and humbling.

Sunday, June 01, 2014

A Plea to Mothers - A Guest Post By Heather SchoppYou are your own, and your child's, biggest advocate and protector--and you were made to be that. Own this, accept it; and never forget it.

We women have been engrained with the thinking that our doctors, preachers, husbands "lead" us and should have the last word. we are told to conform to rules, expectations, routines, schedules set by others who "know best" for us and for our children. we are told we are disobeying God, we are being negligent, we are unwise, we are spoiling and being manipulated by our children, if we do not listen to the "experts" and the "authority."

Here's the thing: God has given us a gift, a voice He hasn't given to anyone else--the gift of maternal instinct. When we are told to follow another's advice at the expense of our instincts, we are being told to disregard this God-given gift (....to quench the Holy Spirit).

Years ago I was talking to a mom about her colicky baby. She told me her doctor said to put the baby in her crib, leave her, and let her cry--there was nothing else they could do for her. I did not express outwardly the grief I felt and said "God has given you instincts that He hasn't given to the doctor, I encourage you to consider those as well." she bristled and said tersely "we trust our doctor and do what he says."

It's not about shaming, insulting, denying medical studies and facts, not considering others' opinions or shutting out others' wisdom; it's about trusting that our instincts are valid and worth heeding and following.

...but sometimes it is about a paradigm shift in our thinking, even in our spiritual beliefs, and recognizing the authority and insight God has given us as women; and it may mean acknowledging the times we haven't responded according to our intuition (whether purposefully or not), and apologizing. That can be painful--has been for me anyway, because I've had to take ownership for the choices I've made that caused pain in my children. and I will have to continue to do so.

But children are quick to forgive, and through my apologizing and their forgiving I believe they heal and grow. and so do I.

God is THE expert and THE authority and only He can speak to you through that inner voice. What a gift He has given us--an inner guide and source of strength and wisdom....Use it!!!!

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About Me

Samuel Martin was born in England and is the youngest child of Dr. Ernest L. and Helen R. Martin, who are both Americans. He lived in the UK for the first 7 years of his life before moving to the USA with his family at age 7. He lived in the USA until 2001 when he married a native Israeli and relocated to live in Jerusalem. He and his wife, Sonia, have 2 daughters.
His experience with biblical scholarship began at an early age. His father initiated a program in conjunction with Hebrew Univ. and Prof. Benjamin Mazar, where over a 5 year period, some 450 college students came to work on an archaeological excavation in Jerusalem starting in 1969. Since that first trip, Samuel has visited Israel on 14 different occasions living more than 5 years of his life in the country. He has toured all areas of Israel as well as worked in several archaeological excavations.
Today, he has begun his academic career publishing 2 books dealing with biblical issues.
I write regularly on biblical subjects with a particular interest in children, families, nature, science and the Bible,and gender in the Biblical context.