Perhaps you grew up dreaming of receiving your Hogwarts letter, or stumbling upon Narnia. Perhaps you long to visit Pemberley, to Defy Gravity, or to go to the ball. I will write you that letter, and build you that wardrobe. [A metaphorical wardrobe, that is.] Here you will find lessons that show you how to live like a literary heroines every day. This means chasing your dreams and making the impossible happen with your own inner magic.

Welcome to our headquarters, where dreams meet reality, where fiction is cherished, where magic is real.

I have always adored coffeeshops.

For me, living my dreams is writing in coffeeshops, every day. Growing up, my AIM screen name was coffeeshopauthor. I had this bookmark that said Cafe Girl, and admired this cool illustrated lady as exemplifying my aspirational life.

[This still is my lucky bookmark, although the tassel fell off, and I’m terrified of losing it so I swap it out for traveling bookmarks when my book is leaving the house…]

So while I’m living in my favourite city, with my favourite coffeeshops, it would be silly own a coffeemaker.

I see no point in taking up precious kitchen space, when I enjoy spending time in cafes so much.

I want my conversation over the counter with my Americano. I want the coffeemaking noises whirring over the music, the delight of a favourite song of mine popping up on a random playlist and making my day.

If I had a coffeemaker at home, I’d feel badly for spending extra money on drinking coffee out – I do feel this way about tea sometimes!

Maybe one day, if I don’t live in walking distance to so many options, I’ll invest in a coffeemaker. I’ll shop for coffee beans and tools, and educate myself on the top coffeemaking tips.

It’s like not having Disney Channel.

Growing up, my sister and I didn’t have Disney Channel. We would look forward to going to our friends’ houses to watch Disney Channel with them. We happened to be in Walt Disney World during the ever-anticipated premiere of Phil of the Future, and guess what? They had Disney Channel there.

So perhaps this went a bit far, because there we were, in our hotel room, watching Disney Channel, but one cannot theme park all day, and hey, it was memorable, wasn’t it?

It was a big deal if our friends had MarioKart.

And really, even though we had both fooseball and air hockey tables, we enjoyed them most when friends came over to enjoy them with us.

So these days, it’s such a luxury when a hotel or friend has a coffeemaker. It’s a luxury to go over to a friend’s house with an actual tv screen, rather than watching Netflix on our laptops.

There are certain things that don’t suit our lifestyle right now, certain tradeoffs for living in the heart of the best city ever, that don’t feel like deprivations when I think of it that way.

Sometimes we fall into the trap of wanting more and more, dwelling on what we don’t have instead of appreciating what we do have in our cosy little home.

The nesting feels forever incomplete, but we’ve chosen to draw the line somewhere, and on the other side of that line is a cottage.

There are some things, some luxuries and nice things, that simply don’t fit in our tiny flat, and therefore into our current lifestyle.

When we identify a thing like this, we say ‘save it for the cottage’. We can dream about it. We can picture it. But we can’t have it yet. And that makes anticipation for the next phase in our lives even more exciting.

Some things we’re saving for the cottage:

A coffeemaker at home

See above.

A home office

Or, a desk that’s not the kitchen table. There isn’t space for a home office, and the best spot in the flat to write is in the big window in the living room anyway.

A guest bedroom

We would love to have a nice, private space for our friends to stay. At the moment we have a sofa and an airbed, but they fit in the living room that’s also our kitchen, dining room, and, as you know, office.

A home cinema

Maybe one day we’ll have a proper screen (or a projector?) with proper speakers that doesn’t dominate our living space, but is available for cinematic use.

A record player and small collection of vinyl

I long for the simpler, more mindful days of a CD player with buttons and tactile appreciation for what we’re listening to. I don’t enjoy the faff of opening Spotify and selecting selecting selecting. One day we will have a record player, and live every day like we’re dining at the Gardener’s Cottage. But for now, we dream.

I ate too much birthday cake.

It made me cranky and bloated and disgruntled. I asked Steve to help me with my sugar problem. We brainstormed some ideas: I could quit sugar, or take a day or a week off sugar… I’ve done Semaines Sans Sucre in the past, and it’s been great, but I want a long-term solution, one that wouldn’t feel so rigid.

We did some research and were reminded that the suggested daily allowance for women is 25g. That’s approximately one pack of Reeses (3 cups), or one full dessert.

On Day 2 of my Sugar Budget project, I was faced with a valuable lesson:

Don’t just eat it because it’s there/free.

There was a free breakfast buffet, and I would normally go for the (stale) pastries because they’re there, and be inevitably disappointed.

But I knew we were going to my favourite restaurant in London, Sketch, for afternoon tea, and I was saving my sugar budget for that.

In the morning, AC and I found a new tearoom, Carmelia’s, and they had one of the most lavish displays of interesting cakes. ‘I’ll have to come back to try these later,’ I thought.

It dawned on me that shopping for sugar is no different from any other kind of shopping.

I wouldn’t look at a display of beautiful handbags and think ‘If I don’t buy one, I’ll be depriving myself and missing out!’ I would note my interest, save my pennies, and spend them thoughtfully.

Why don’t I do the same with sugar? Why do I feel like I have to try every treat that presents itself to me for fear of missing out?

Sugar cravings should be dealt with in the same way that I deal with cravings for high fashion.

Some lessons I’ve learned from a few weeks of minding my Sugar Budget

I don’t NEED sugar every day.

Sometimes I get to the end of the day and think ‘Oh I didn’t have any sugar today!’

This is immense progress. It used to be that after every meal or savoury snack I would think ‘dessert time’!

(In college, I would initiate group outings to go get ‘breakfast dessert’ at Ben’s Cookies).

I’ve realised that I save and save and at the end of the day, if nothing worthwhile presents itself, I don’t need to spend my sugar budget.

It helps to be a snob.

Having Sketch to look forward to was the ultimate treat. It raised the bar so that any morsel of sugar I encountered in the morning was worth passing over.

I don’t need to clean my dessert plate.

While I did a great job saving up my Sugar Budget for Sketch, I still made the mistake of eating selectively based on what I thought I could save for the next day.

What I would have done differently is have a nibble at everything, and enjoy my favourites. Even though I had ‘invested’ in the sugary treats, I enjoyed the savoury ones even more!

I don’t want to quit sugar. I want to enjoy it sensibly as a treat rather than a necessity.

Knowing myself, I’m very rigid, and very strict and hard on myself when I don’t keep my personal promises. (Upholder alert!). I would get too obsessed over Quitting Sugar, and I would get too anxious over eating ‘less sugar’. 25g is quantifiable, even if I’m estimating.

Maybe sugar isn’t as great as I thought.

Paying attention to when I consume sugar has helped me notice that while it’s delicious, it also directly correlates to feeling grumpy, tired, and bloated. And I judge people for drinking too much when they know it will give them hangovers…

9 – Your friend’s show

10 – A free show

Arrive early to ensure that you get a seat, and plan to go attend early in the festival just in case. I’m sad to say that I missed Dave Chawner’s show last year because I didn’t prioritise it early enough. Bring cash to tip the performer afterwards!

14 – Something at the International Festival

15 – Something from the Korean Season

I adore the enthusiasm and spirit of the Korean Season performers. Every year they are first on the Royal Mile in the morning promoting their shows. This attitude carries through their performances, which are full of zest. And I like to celebrate my heritage 🙂

16 – Something at Summerhall

The centre of the festival, in my opinion (and I’m not alone in that), with a thoughtful and diverse programme. If you’re ever overwhelmed by all the festival has to offer, just narrow it down to what’s on at Summerhall.

17 – Something at the Traverse

Edinburgh’s New Writing venue has a particularly exciting lineup this year. Go to their breakfast plays for a double tick!

It’s worth mentioning that shows are not always on at the same time at the Traverse. Check the listings to get the full picture.

18 – Something from a flyer, especially if the performer handed it to you

Dedicate an afternoon to embracing the flyerers. Walk down the Royal Mile shopping for theatre.

Chat with the people handing you the leaflets, especially if it’s the performer flyering for their own shows. This is unbelievably tiring and I like to reward their effort.

19 – Your friend’s choice

Go to something just because a friend is going. Let them introduce you to something they’re excited about. This is how I found out about Josie Long and Chris Gethard.

20 – A genre you’ve never seen before

A new type of dance, physical theatre, circus, spoken word, opera… There must be something completely new and strange that you’ve never seen before!

21 – Something from a country you’ve never been to

Take advantage of how many productions from different countries are here at the same time, and travel the globe via their performances. I’ve never been to Argentina but I’ve seen Un Poyo Rojo. (Thanks Katie for this idea!)

I wrote for them back in the day, and that’s how I know they’re great 😉 They cover lesser known productions and are great for finding hidden gems. I discovered Lucy, Lucy, and Lucy Barfield through them *before* Lyn Gardner wrote about it. Speaking of which…

Here at Heroine Training you will find lessons about embodying fictional heroines in the everyday. I’m Xandra, your headmistress, a Gryffindor and self-proclaimed Disney princess. I live in the storybook city of Edinburgh, Scotland. Read more

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