Remembering names

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Moderator

It was brought up in another thread about greeting visitors at church. One person said the most important thing to do is no to forget their name.

What tricks do you use to remember the name of a new person.

I tent to use word association.
For example, we just had a new neighbor move in, actually, I forgot his first name already, but his last name is Pierce - as in Hawkeye Pierce (the Dr on M.A.S.H.). That is my system. Any other ideals?

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<img src =/Jim1999.jpg>

I think the secret is to repeat their name the moment you learn it........I also used to write it down on a paper before I went out to preach.

People are always alert when their name is used in greeting. I also follow the English formality rules. Never use a person's first name until they give you permission......hence, it is always Mr. or Mrs..Miss or even master. They just write me off as being English.

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Active Member

I seldom call people by name because I will often get them wrong. It would be great to call each one by name but I have been known to shake hands with Joel and call him James. We all laughed about it but I wonder if it hurt his feelings. :-(
I know it embrassed me.

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Active Member

I don't have the greatest memory; neither do I have advice on how to remember names. But I don't think folk's feelings are hurt by calling them the wrong name on occasion. I'm guessing we all do this sometimes.

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Well-Known Member

It is a big deal to remember names. As much as you can, always always always try to remember them. Forgetting someone's name is tantamount to forgetting them. It’s interesting that Scripture states that He doesn’t just know us, but “He knows our names.”

Remembering names takes work, but can be done. Here are some helpful hints that I use & they really do help.

Pay attention. Number one – you actually have to pay attention. Quit looking around. Quite thinking about what you need to do later on in the day. Not only will this help, this shows respect to the other person. Listen. Look them in the eyes. Make sure that you understood the name correctly. Repeat. Say their name again. For example, instead of “Nice to meet you” make it “Nice to meet you Kathy.”Make it personal. Say something that will help you remember his/her name. “You know my sister’s name is Kathy too.” or “Do you spell yours with a “C” or “K”? This shows interest in the other person. Say their name in a sentence. If possible, turn the greeting into a short conversation where you use the person’s name. “So Kathy, how long have you lived in our town?” Again, showing interest shows respect. Repeat their name in closing. “Nice to meet you Kathy.”

Using these six steps will have you remembering other’s names much better than before.

Prior to meetings, I usually write down the names of those I will be meeting with. If I’ve ever met their spouses and/or children, I will verify their names before hand (as well as family issues -- is a child in college, etc). Nothing like a little homework. Again, it's showing respect and showing interest. In meetings, when I am meeting people for the 1st time, I almost always use jot their names down & use them as notes. Then I practice the six steps above. At the end of the meeting, I've got their names down pat.

Also, if you happen to forget someone’s name, own up to it. Apologize and let them know that you simply forgot their name. It’s so much better than trying to slide by using a general term like “hey buddy.” People know when you know their name or not. Just be honest – people understand & appreciate this. Just remember their name the next time.

PS -- What name did I use in the example? Easy -- Kathy. I used it four times.

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New Member

It is a big deal to remember names. As much as you can, always always always try to remember them. Forgetting someone's name is tantamount to forgetting them. It’s interesting that Scripture states that He doesn’t just know us, but “He knows our names.”

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Active Member

Pay attention. Number one – you actually have to pay attention. Quit looking around. Quite thinking about what you need to do later on in the day. Not only will this help, this shows respect to the other person. Listen. Look them in the eyes. Make sure that you understood the name correctly. Repeat. Say their name again. For example, instead of “Nice to meet you” make it “Nice to meet you Kathy.”Make it personal. Say something that will help you remember his/her name. “You know my sister’s name is Kathy too.” or “Do you spell yours with a “C” or “K”? This shows interest in the other person. Say their name in a sentence. If possible, turn the greeting into a short conversation where you use the person’s name. “So Kathy, how long have you lived in our town?” Again, showing interest shows respect. Repeat their name in closing. “Nice to meet you Kathy.”

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No prob in the short run ~ simple and do-able. Just has nothing to do with the long run. Either you're a forget person, or not. You're a neat person, or not. You're a prompt person, or not. You're a quiet person, or not. And so on ...

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Well-Known Member

No prob in the short run ~ simple and do-able. Just has nothing to do with the long run. Either you're a forget person, or not. You're a neat person, or not. You're a prompt person, or not. You're a quiet person, or not. And so on ...

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PJ, I agree that it is easier for some than others. But it can be done -- just takes one more work for one than the other. Either way though - for most of us anyway -- it takes work.

BTW, both of our teens have to clean their rooms --easier for one than the other, but both have to do it even though one is not the neat one.

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20,000 Posts Club

Moderator

No prob in the short run ~ simple and do-able. Just has nothing to do with the long run. Either you're a forget person, or not. You're a neat person, or not. You're a prompt person, or not. You're a quiet person, or not. And so on ...

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PJ, I am not prompt, not neat, not quiet and I forget names very easy.

Therefore, I must work at those deficiencies, it is hard, but I need to consecrate and give myself enough time to do things properly.

ps, I would advise you to NEVER ask me to work on your car - I have virtually a zero IQ when it comes to vehicle maintenance. But once on the Thruway (I-90) the cable to my gas accelerator broke. I had no ideal how to fix it, but believe it or not, I made a temporary repair until I got back to the Salt City.
Hmm - was that my punishment for going to a Southern Gospel Concert? :laugh:

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Active Member

I am HORRIBLE about remembering names until I do something memorable with people. I just apologize.

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Same here ...

Our pastor is so funny. Charlotte, one of our church members, has been with us since 1986 and pastor still sometimes calls her Scarlett. LOL! People are gracious; they love us despite ourselves. :laugh:

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