Life. Liberty. Pursuit of Our Next Beer.

Ronaldo Doing Ronaldo Things, Wins Euro 2016

Somehow, someway, Ronaldo comes out of this tournament smelling like roses, and winning Portugal’s first ever title, in a major competition, in the most uncanny of ways.

Truthfully, this tournament has been so shitty for Portugal. In normal years, they wouldn’t have even qualified for the knockout stages because they drew every game in the group stage, and finished third; but now there’s a new format which led to them getting through. They also ended up in a much weaker side of the bracket and, at times, played some very ugly soccer; but only one thing matters… They made it through.

Then in the final, they lose their best player early, as Ronaldo left the game in tears after just 25 minutes. To everybody watching the game, it was all but over, but not to the Portuguese team. The team bought in to their coach’s system, weathered the storm of the French attack, and willed themselves to an unfathomable victory.

As for Ronaldo, he will forever be thought of as a God in Portugal. Hell, he already had a statue of himself erected by the Portuguese, and I say erected cause… well, look at it.

But now that he’s brought them a trophy?! Game over. Dick Swingin’ Ronaldo is going to be able to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants, and he should. He has earned that right, regardless of what any idiot says.

If this final game told me anything it’s that it has become very hard to hate Ronaldo. I call this the LeBron effect. Everyone can talk about the arrogance and cockiness that each of them has, but it genuinely was awesome seeing the emotions of both of them during the biggest games of their lives; and this is coming from a guy who refuses to try Blaze Pizza because LeBron is an owner.

The emotions being shown humanized Ronaldo in a way like nothing else could; and because of this, I stand with Ronaldo.