Monday, December 31, 2012

I am not talking about the ones when Stallone takes a beating and the only scars are from all of his plastic surgeries.

I am talking about the 1970's Rocky.

Remember Mickey?

Burgess Meredith was fantastic in this role (a far cry from his years as the Penguin in the Batman TV series).

He pushed Rocky. He motivated Rocky. He coached Rocky.

"So I say, for God's sake, why don't you stand up and fight this guy HARD? Like you done before, that was beautiful! But don't lay down like this! Like, uh, I don't know, like some kind of mongrel or something."

In life...there will always be times when we think we are down for the count. It has happened and will happen again...a lot. But you have to get off the mat. "Don't lay down like this!"

You have no choice. People are going to knock you down. Things are going to knock you down. Your own personal demons are going to knock you down. You have to get up. Life is too precious not to. When you are down on the mat...you spend too much time licking your wounds to see life going on around you.

Your life is just like Rocky. You will have sequel after sequel after sequel. You have to see it through to the end of the movie. That's where the real applause happens.

Think of yourself as a planet with several circling orbits. There are only three things you can control at any given time though. Yourself and the two closest orbits. That's it. Figure out what those orbits are and do your damndest to make them work. Do your damndest to make them whole. Do your damndest to make them fulfilling. Forget everything else because you can't control them.

I have a catch phrase that I use that annoys some people but brings an affirmative shake of the head to others when used.

"It is what it is."

I tell the people who hate it to find me a better one and I will start using it immediately.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

The other night I was standing at a bar waiting for a drink and I overheard the conversation next to me.

It was obvious to me, the bartender and everyone else around what this dynamic was all about.

It was either a first date or a bar attempt by the male species to "get to know" the young lady better.

It was going nowhere fast.

He would say something. She would politely disagree or refute his position on the topic and then he would try to backtrack and force agreement, chemistry and hope for some sort of sign of the ice thawing.

Throw me a bone here.

So if it were obvious to us bystanders, was it obvious to the participants as well.

No matter what relationship you are working on. Romantic. Platonic. Business. Casual. The communication connection points are key. You have to give up a little...but take in a lot. You have to pull them into your conversation. You have to find the tipping point where you take it from idle chit chat to engagement.

You also have to know when to throw in the towel. When it's just not going to happen. Idle chit chat...is a waste of time. You want to move it from neutral to either forward or reverse because if you idle long enough, you will simply run out of gas and then you really are going nowhere.

Look...even without the conversation (if you want to call it that)...one would probably bet against the pairing at the bar the other night but if he would've been able to engage...it might have gotten interesting. You still would've asked..."how did he end up with her" but true communication connection points of engagement can break down traditional perceived barriers.

Throw an ice cube in a glass of single malt and watch how fast it melts. Now, that is some serious engagement.