Abilities

Alright.....this is not easy for me to do, I don't talk about it but to just my closest family but, it's getting bad.
Ever since I can remember I have been able to see colors, some of you call them auras, around people. I am able to see others, that others can't see, they show/tell me what they want me to tell people I don't even know, and it has been a burden pretty much all my life. I don't even go outside anymore because I see people from multiple time periods and when I see the "living" I see nothing but colors around each and every person and at least 1 or 2 others following them as if they are like guardians.
I'm not religious, I, to some extent am spiritual, I can not understand how to turn it off, I use to have tricks that worked to turn it off but, they don't work anymore. Meditation doesn't help, they find that as a great conduit. Sleep has been difficult for many many years.
It has gotten to where it effects my everyday life to the point I don't go outside, I don't have friends, I prefer to be alone, sometimes even when I'm with my wife and kids, all the things I use to do I don't want to do anymore.
They try to come inside now, I've used salt, mirrors, sage, chants and it seems to only be a temporary solution to a eternal issue because they always return wanting the same result. After all these years of dealing with this, it is not a gift, I find it to be more of a curse because it's causing the life I'm in now hell.
I could get heller deep with this but I really want to tread lightly about certain aspects of this for reasons I can't understand quite yet.
Bottom line is, I really don't want this so called "gift", am I all alone here with this?

Well, everyone is 'all alone' with their persona and its experiences. Can you find a way to just be the witness of experience without identifying as it? The identity has a picture of how it and everything perceived should be. When this image is not in alignment with experience (and it can never be for long), this is what suffering is. We truly are not the experiences or the stories that come out of them.

As the song says, "every hand's a winner, and every hand's a loser." We don't find peace in what we perceive of the many versions of our worlds. We find it in itself, the quiet ground of peace itself. There may not ever be any rational understanding for what is experienced, but there is the possibility of finding a perspective in the heart which allows what is to just be. It may be called for that a persona is allowed to be what it is long enough to be seen that it is not what truly is, not what we are. In a humble acceptance of what is, the complete field of perception changes.

I understand. Anyone with "gifts", will at times not consider them gifts at all...................

For myself, I can say only that I have learned to create "safe zones", but that you can never turn it off altogether. I use "the mirror" when needed, around really toxic people or places, and when I am most vulnerable. I was taught this as a child to help comfort when it became too much. You sound like you are at that point.

I was taught to see a sphere around me of mirror reflection. There could be no ill will in its construction. Any negative energy or projection will simply reflect away. With negative vibes or people , it returns to them, with visitation it is seen as a "time out", and a no pass zone. It requires intent and some effort to materialize at first, but gets easier.

My grandfather used a hat. When he put it on, it was a "not now", and allowed down time from the energies and entities vieing for attention. There is no one way, but you do need to understand that they will always want you to see and react. Establishing a safe zone is more a state of mind than any smudge or salt barrier, not that they do not assist.

So no, you are not alone. And this can be controlled to some extent, at least enough to feel like you have a break when you need the down time.....

Sending positive light to you. Touch your favorite tree. I left it there for you...........................................

@ Samwise, I have not seen that movie but have since bookmarked to watch tonight.

@ Skywatcher, You do know where I am coming from, I use to have ways to turn it off or "safe zone" but the ones I used don't work anymore and any others I have done do not work. Some of them demand to come inside to be heard and I will not allow that, I know what can be behind the mask, hence the salt, sage, and mirrors. The ones outside when I do go outside stare as if I am out of place or some other reason I can't quite figure out yet but sometimes they are a bit more vocal towards me, especially the ones that seem to yell.........I shall refrain from going further.

@ Spooner, these experiences with people minus close family like wife and kids, I just see colors around them. And it happens with animals, I only get it from living animate creations.

I'd just like to find a different, better way to control it, ya know, shut it off when I want, need, have to, I went out today for about 2 hours and I hated it, being where other people are it's like seeing , for lack of a better phrase, rainbows around people, not to mention the ones that follow.......fuck man I sound like a fucking lunatic, I refrain for now.

Do you place any trust or belief in the energy of crystals? Specifically the unique properties and energies of different materials? Have you ever done any crystal grids?

More importantly, are you willing to try? It is of tantamount importance that you can position and charge a grid with positive intent, and have confidence that the combined properties of the crystals will amplify the total effect.

A grid can be set to cover a room, and even the entire house. You can use this to bar negative from an area, but not likely to stop all visitation if there is no ill motive or intent.

Your original ways of creating your safe zones, will be effective again, if you can get "recharged". It seems you are feeling drained, and this quite literally could be what is happening, and that much more reason to insure a recuperative place or state.

Spirit guides and Allies, or Guardians, are also levels of a trusted source of protection from "energy vampires", those that seek only to drain and feed off your energy. I would suspect you can feel the difference in visitors that would seek and be drawn to your light for need with no ill intent, and those that wish to diminish that light.

You may PM me if there are specifics you are not comfortable sharing on the boards, if you feel you could trust me. I would gladly share what materials work well for me. Some I find more effective as personal energy amplifiers, and prefer to use as personal talismans so to speak.

It is amazing to me how many energy vampires I have dealt with in my lifetime. I find that most of the time I am the problem for letting them in to begin with. Sort of like some interactions with people. Allowing it to happen once opens the door for further chaos. You can mentally slam a door shut, just as you can physically slam one. I would like to know more about stones that would act as a backup

I reported this in a UFO thread, that in a near waking from sleep, the face of a gray alien was felt as projected into my visual awareness. Having been made aware that I had a choice (by a spiritual guide), I seemed, even in sleep, to remember this. I said, "NO!" Whatever force that had made the projection seemed to be immediately blocked. You, as consciousness, are not limited in power. As personality, power is given away to an idea, a belief of who and what we are. It is this believed in persona which can be danced around by other such virtual entities. Self discovery can emerge as the difference between what is a gift and what is a curse.

Skywatcher, I am interested hearing about the stones/crystals as well. I was reluctant to post this last night for fear of hijacking the thread but maybe it is something else...

Just before my weird incident this weekend (receiving communication from THE mycelium network, Don't know how else to put it but that is what brought me to this site), I was compelled to go to my cold room to look for something, can't even remember what it was, there, I saw a box with some 1Kg bags of Himalayan pink salt rocks I had purchased years ago for culinary purposes, they didn't quite work out for that... I grabbed a bag and one of my stainless steel camping plates and said "what the hell"... brought them in, carefully washed the plate, poured the 1-2" sized salt rocks into the plate and set it on top of my stereo, under my monitor, so, just over a leg length away, directly in front of me. When I read your post last night, I looked down at the plate of salt and thought "Holy shit!" and immediately went and got 2 more bags and 2 more plates and put them around the room so now I sit within a triangle of the salt while on the computer... not sure if I'm doing it right but gawd damn, I actually got 7 hours of solid sleep today... a rare thing for me these days... Like as in I just woke up, this thread was on screen, hit refresh and here I am typing.

@ Skywatcher, yes I have trust with the energy of crystals. Beings a scorpio I keep the birth stones I have, on my being or close by at all times, as for making a grid..... I haven't done that and not sure if I can or know how due to the multiple grid layouts that can be arranged. I have a charging stone but I can't remember the name of the stone, I can put a pic of it up if need be, it was gave to me. I also have a few random stones that were gotten from a river bank, most people would consider them just rocks but for some reason I kept them.
My wife has some soapstone and this greenish white carved elephant piece but, I don't get a bad vibe from it. I have to stay away from amethyst, the vibration is ....hmmm, I don't know how to explain it, very uncomfortable. I don't have many crystals nor the funds to get them. I would hunt for them but there is not many in my area of the world. I do have citrine, and rose quartz which are under my birth sign. I know I should have others.
I am aware of the stones and crystals associated with my sign, I may not have a proper charging stone.

@ Alder, I don't want to blend this thread with aliens, but my wife and I have had a few experiences over a few years and we think maybe within the past 2 -4 years, if I tried typing out what has happened, it would be a freaking book. I have had contact but, then I think to myself maybe I've done to much chemicals in my life to know what reality really is but, that's for another thread.

I should say, I have had this "ability" all my life, some days it's stronger than others. I do what I can to help others with it. One of our friends mom died a couple months back and I never met the lady but I know her daughter and I kept seeing water and the urge to tell our friend remember the water (I could see it like a slideshow along with the woman telling me what was going on).....at first our friend didn't catch it, until she said she remembered a time when her mom grabbed her out of a pond and kept her from drowning, HOW THE FUCK COULD I KNOW THIS !!!!????? Our friends jaw dropped to the floor and I thought she thought I was fucking a madman.
This is what I'm trying to say.....this happens all the time. At times I have wondered if I am cursed, or if I may have done something extremely wrong in some former form / life.

I should add that watching Paul Stamets conferences this past weekend has really opened my eyes to a bunch of stuff. I always knew there was some 'omnipotent' connection between us, and others, the things around us. Paul gets into some of this but not as deeply as I'm going to get right now. To preface, the amanitas cause people to see color abberrations (sp) by causing a chemical to be released in the eyeball. This same effect can be seen if you close your eyes and press on your eyelid. I heard/read/saw that probably 25 years ago so maybe the understanding of it has been updated by now... anyway, The Mycelial network is the largest, oldest, most intelligent organism on the planet that has the capability of exuding chemicals to cause myriad different effects. We are evolved from the mycelium, well, actually, spawn of the mycelium (yes, we are mushrooms) We are here to do the networks bidding as it has no legs to walk, no mouth to speak, no arms to reach, no eyes to see, it does all these things through us, most are not aware, however. The network knows all that we know, as all of our knowledge came from it, we just have to realize it and embrace the fact and allow it to teach us. The network teaches us indirectly, without our knowledge by way of exuding chemicals that we can not see, smell or taste, consciously. The network makes us see what we see because that is our purpose, we may not know what that purpose is at the moment but it will come, and you will know when that time is.

That's all I have for now, going to have to cogitate some more and try to get some stuff into words that I can understand.

Again, hard to explain, but when people talk to me it is like I have a babelfish in my head that translates what people say into the truth. It manifests as a sort of 'flash'; usually, I understand the flash instantly, sometimes not for years or even 10's of years...

Take, for instance, my first post in this thread, I didn't really understand why I wanted to say that, but now that I have had an awesome sleep and actually let the rest of it come to me in a way that I could articulate it... well, sometimes there is a period of time that it takes between seeing the light and understanding the light.

And again, After watching Paul's videos on ytube this weekend, my curiosity (or something) led me to this site, the first thread I read was in the 'mad scientist' section as I am one :), a multiple page thread where the OP was giving some bad info, I opined, I was immediately compelled to join and rectify the information because I thought newbs might try the tek and waste their spores and turn away from the hobby... I had some trouble with the site registration because of my email address and almost walked away from the whole thing. but a couple nights later I was bs'ing with my buddy upstairs and this stupid conversation I had with a co-worker, years ago, pops into my head and I find myself telling my friend about this stupid BoTox conversation, totally not relevant to anything we were talking about but I tried to segway it into our conversation, not knowing why. Later, sitting here, staring at the monitor wondering why this site won't send me a confirmation email, the BoTox conversation pops into my head again and I was like "holy shit" that is why I am supposed to join this site so I followed through and found out why and got joined up and made my fully respectful response to the thread, which was completely different from what had originally popped into my head when I initially saw the post and wanted to make a reply.

In the last couple of months I have realized that I have been to reactive, as in chemically reactive like dropping rubidium into water and that I have to take a step back and calm down. but if I don't put some things into writing right away and sit there and stare at it for a while and and just walk away, not doing or saying anything then whole point may be lost, that is why I usually end up making a short post and then come back and edit or make another reply, after I have read between the lines of what I said, myself, and figure out what it is exactly that I was trying to articulate.

The things we see, or the things we perceive to have seen are, whether real or not, are simply electrochemical stimuli in the brain. What is real and what isn't real?

@ Skywatcher, yes I have trust with the energy of crystals. Beings a scorpio I keep the birth stones I have, on my being or close by at all times, as for making a grid..... I haven't done that and not sure if I can or know how due to the multiple grid layouts that can be arranged. I have a charging stone but I can't remember the name of the stone, I can put a pic of it up if need be, it was gave to me. I also have a few random stones that were gotten from a river bank, most people would consider them just rocks but for some reason I kept them............

I am going to start by saying shaman and healers of old, did not have a local crystal shop, or the internet to find materials they needed.......................

Do not dismiss the power and energy of crystals and stones that "came to you" while walking. They are there for a reason.

I have many "rocks" I have picked up because they called to me somehow, and also some that I picked up while looking with a specific intent, such as dreamstones. Your intuitive feel of any stone is your most valuable asset. Trust it. When you walk with intent to find stones to assist you, they will draw you when they are willing to work with you.

Gridding is 95% intuition, and placement is not a map to be followed, but more a matter of combining properties that add to the intended outcome, and knowing once bound, the total is greater than the individual parts.

I have stones I prefer for repelling negatives, but the intent you place is what creates the focus that then radiates outward.

Quartz is a generator, and amplifies the properties of stone it is used with. It also makes a good focus point to build around.

There are so many options, it is not any one combo to create a safezone. I carry a Nuummite when I want a strong shield. It repels any negative back to the source, multiplied. It helps reinforce "the mirror", and is most helpful when I am going someplace where I know there will be toxic people around. It cannot be used with ill will to another however, as that would have a reverse effect. Its more of a confidence I am safe from negative vibes overwhelming and becoming confused with my own mind, and a satisfaction that what is thrown will bounce back and the sender gets what they sent. I need feel no malice.

Other very protective stones are I carry at times are Kyanite,(which like Selenite will retain no negative, so it clears and does not need cleaning itself), Agates, obsidians, and tourmaline. There are hundreds more, but these are some of my favorites for what you are trying to block for a while.

I have grid my entire house. I use geometric layouts of simple construction like 4 point or 6 point positions around a single amplifier like a Quartz. ( Chlorite inclusion Quartz is most effective for a protective grid center. Around this I selected a combination that was all supportive. Lapiz for psychic attack, Kyanite to remove the negative, Rose Quartz for balancing with love and positive, Carnelian as a physical protection, Amethyst for toxins of the mind and body, and Ruby in Fushite as another positive infusion of well being.

ANY STONES THAT FEEL SUPPORTIVE, PROVIDE A SENSE OF WELL BEING, AND FEEL COMFORTABLE TO YOU WILL WORK. TRUST YOUR SENSES

I placed these in a 6 point around the quartz, and put 16 pieces of black tourmaline in a circle around it. The grid is then charged with its purpose, (that no negative energy shall pass within or disturb anyone within, and shall reflect away) I charge with the white light, the universal source, and fill the grid to radiate above and below, and in all directions as a circle. I then cover the grid to leave all the parts to meld as one. Afterwards, I spread the outer ring of tourmaline to all corners and points between of the perimeters of the house, which spread the radius to encompass the house and all within.

I keep the heart of this grid charged and cleansed, and it has worked well for me. I also like salt crystals as absorption material that clears and replaces with positive.

I mention specific stones, but there are multiple substitutions that are eqivalent, but the most powerful channels for your intent will be stones that were attracted to you and you to them. I do not believe in coincidence. If you kept them, they were wanting to help and assist you.

Once again Baphom, I have sent you positive energy to help and be well. Touch a tree you like. I send through the living matrix of all that connects in the living veneer. The trees are my friends and they carry messages and energy for me when I ask nicely......

I've known a few people in life who told me they see auras around people. I'd say every single one of them was lying to me based on getting to know them further. I'm definitely not saying you are lying nor do I think you are. I'm just sayen you aren't gonna find help from other people that have this issue or at least claim to.

I'd say roll with it. Get a booth at a Saturday market. People pay for the fake shit hand over fist. If you have a real gift with this then I'd suggest that is God's purpose for you in life. And if you don't do the whole God thing then fill in the flying spaghetti monster or 'Bob' or whatever.

...I'd say roll with it. Get a booth at a Saturday market. People pay for the fake shit hand over fist. If you have a real gift with this then I'd suggest that is God's purpose for you in life. And if you don't do the whole God thing then fill in the flying spaghetti monster or 'Bob' or whatever.

Good luck and keep us posted.

Baphom3t, to some degree I'm going to have to agree with OysterFarmer on this part.

Why? Because I'm your opposite.

For my whole life I've been 100% blind to the things you see. I've wanted to know on an experiential level that there's more to the universe than what I perceive physically but to no avail. My mother, all my grandparents, my uncle, my step mother, and more have all passed yet I've gotten no indications that they continue. I've tried lucid dreaming with no success in communications. I've had no spiritual experiences, no communications from "the other side", no indication whatsoever that there's more to our existence than what we have now.

I'm liked a person blind from birth living in a world of those who can see. If I were blessed to have such gifts, I'd try to help as many people as I could who needed such help. But that's just me. I understand everyone is different and your situation sounds rather intense so please don't think I'm not emphasizing with your situation. I can never fully put myself in your shoes and some people's pain is too great to work with others and that's perfectly fine.

I just know that from my side being "blind" that if I could find someone who truly can see beyond and could help me with contact, I'd be forever grateful and my life would definitely change hopefully for the better.

I would suggest that we are all dealt the hand we need, for reasons we might not now imagine.

What is it to be thankful for what is? Could it be peace? Does a desire for anything (even for peace or desirelessness) bring peace? Seeing ourselves as less than some imagined perfect state sets up the duality of the seeker and the sought. Then our devotion goes to seeking, while the what is remains as it is, with perhaps a seeming added stress of an imagined shortage of what is.

Tell me Baphomet, you said you don't want this "gift"... but was there a time once when , in fact, you craved it?

This is your mind, or at least your current "experience" - hat tip to Alder, but of course all you really want is the control panel. A power you cannot control is not a gift, but under control, it most certainly is.

You have to learn to play this thing just as a musician learns to play their instrument. That is how it works.

Sorry to be blunt about it... but no reason to beat around the bush.

I like Skye's "Time out hat" - No doubt the Wizard and witch hats of days of yore owe some credence to this. You have to experiment. You have to keep experimenting (because I know you have been), "Your a Wizard Harry" so to speak... Unfortunately it's not a question.

@ Steampunk....
No, I was born with this so called "gift", I've hated it from the beginning, as I've gotten older I have done everything to stop it but, only found that all I can do is just mellow it out and shut it off at certain times, and those times don't happen very often.
If it's my mind then I'm done fucked beyond anything that I can explain and should get help....but, what is there to help with when it is something I can not walk away from and has been with me from the beginning of my existence?
I have had this all my life and that's just it......I don't want to play with it. I didn't ask for it nor do I want it.

@Kristus....you are not blind....you just haven't opened your eyes yet. But be careful, for what you may see may lead to..............that choice is yours.

@Alder......you are a interesting person, the way you look at things equals a form of zen from a person that's studied buddhism among a few other beliefs from that region that reach to the ground. You seem to be grounded to the mother, honestly, being grounded is something I don't like. The freedom of the other side and all it has to offer has always been apart of my life. I have a bit different outlook.....as above / so below, I am both light and dark, I see both equally as they are of the same origin. When one is comfortable they do not learn.

I'm not fancy with words and shit so I hope I'm not pissing anyone off.
I mean no disrespect to any of you and I really appreciate all of the advice, and conversation that's been had here, all the comments mean a lot to me.