Welcome to Quinoa Acres – More Than a Preschool!

First things first: We don’t call ourselves a “preschool.” We’re not merely something you do before “real” school begins. We’re a play-based (and so much more – but we’ll get to that in a moment) learning center, where the children learn by experience. Therefore, we are the Quinoa Acres Experience Center.

Now, about our philosophy. We of course put the children first, always! They learn by playing, doing, experiencing. Not only are we play-based, we’re outdoors-based – in the cooler months we provide the children with outerwear that can withstand sub-zero temperatures. No need to worry, it’s not filled with goose down, it’s vegan and made with special fair-trade certified polymers. In addition to being play-based and outdoors-based, we are 100% organic, vegan, and gluten and nut free, of course.

Also, we use a special method similar to the Montessori method, but one that was piloted by our founder and really emphasizes freedom. To that end, there are no fences around the Quinoa Acres campus. The children are free to roam as far as they want, but we gently encourage them to make good choices in this regard. Some parents implant digital tracking devices in their children, but we don’t recommend this if your child has a metal allergy – please check with your pediatrician.

A word about holidays. First of all, we strive to celebrate ALL holidays – whether they are federal, state, local, or religious. We include all religions – Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Pagan, etc. There are approximately 96 holidays in the Quinoa Acres calendar year, and we are closed for each holiday. However, we make a special effort to celebrate each holiday the day before or after.

We don’t serve unhealthy treats like cupcakes, chocolates, cakes, or candies. Instead, we provide the children with organic, artisanal, hand-sharpened pencils as treats. The children love it! We have all kinds of pencils, not just #2. We have a special source for #1 pencils that are made by indigenous peoples all over the world. We are, after all, global citizens, although we also support our local businesses whenever possible.

Plastic is not allowed at Quinoa Acres in any form. Do not send your child in with plastic bags, lunch boxes, or clothing/footwear that contains any plastic. There are no plastic toys allowed at the Quinoa Acres Experience Center. We encourage the children to play with wooden toys, or better yet, tree branches, or our large selection of organic pencils.

You are probably wondering about the qualifications of our Child Guides, which is what we call the adults who guide the children during their time at Quinoa Acres. They all have advanced degrees in early childhood education. In addition, they are required to take courses that emphasize our core beliefs. These include (non-dairy) yogurt making, yurt building, and Inner Wolf Consciousness Raising. We have a ratio of 48 Child Guides for every 2 children, although, again, the children are encouraged to make their own choices.

You may also be wondering about our tuition and our hours of operation. Tuition is $80,000 per child per year. We offer a two percent discount for each sibling! We’re open for three hours a day, and as noted above, closed for 96 holidays.

You are welcome to take a tour of Quinoa Acres during our hours of operation. Please remember to observe our bans on plastic, fur, feathers, leather, meat, dairy, nuts and gluten. In addition, we please ask you to avoid wearing the color yellow as one of the children has a special sensitivity to it.

Thank you in advance for your cooperation and your consideration of Quinoa Acres.

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Janine Annett has been published in various online and print outlets, including recent humor pieces on Maximum Middle Age and the Akashic Books website, and is currently working on writing picture books. She lives just outside of New York City with her husband, son, and very old cat.