Yesterday I foolishly left my 16 year old son in the car with my mobile phone when I went into the house for 10 minutes and came out to him looking ashen. He had guessed my passcode and opened the phone (looking for a game to play he said!) to be greeted some very descriptive sexting on whatsapp between myself and a guy I've been seeing for the last 9 months. I don't know how far back in the conversation he went, but there was some really explicit stuff on there. Including porn links that we send eachother sometimes. Nothing weird or illegal... But very naughty. Stuff he doesn't want imprinting on his memory about his mum. I feel like an awful mother. At first I told him off for going on my phone without permission. Then it seemed quite funny so we had a bit of a laugh.Since then he's been a bit off with me. He said he sees me In a new light. I hope it's not ruined our relationship forever, we usually get on so well. I tried to talk to him but he says he just wants to forget about it. I've been single 18 months. He knows I'm seeing someone but he's not met him and I've not had any men at our house. After getting out of an abusive relationship of 10 years I promised my lad that it would just be and him for the foreseeable future and I intend to stick to that oath. I don't think I'm doing anything wrong, I see this guy a couple of times a month and Inbetween this is how we stay connected. Am I a terrible mother? How will we get over this?My worst fears are that my lad will have a weird attitude to sex now... It's a funny age isn't it?Or that he will lose respect for me. It's usually parents that catch their teenagers sexting, this is even worse!

Well, it was his fault, if he opened your phone and entered a password when he hadn't been told to. At 16 he really should have known better; he must know people have private things on their phones. I would just forget about it - I honestly don't think it will affect him badly, or he'll retain it for long. At his age he's probably far too interested in his own life. If you wanted to move a man in, I'm sure he'd care about that, but not just a bit of texting.

These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.

Oopps, it might have had a lasting effect on a girl of that age not a boy, he will have girlfriend of his own soon if not already and the concept of mum having a boyfriend just had not entered his mind. Just forget about it and go about your routine as normal, he would have found out soon enough. Change your phone passcode because he will surely want to keep up with events