Get a really strong outside pivot. Those are the bain of my existence but looking back I see that without it, I had no chance at the jump. My coach would even have me skate into the jump but then revolve the pivot instead of jumping. Pulling that edge around is key.

It did not help me that my coach was a former pairs skater thus had a gorgeous pivot (think death spirals!) So he Just did not understand why I struggled. (my inside pivot are excellent)

My coach has also prescribed back outside pivots. To start with she wants me to jump out of the pivot. Cross your feet before taking off - I didn't pick that up from the technical description of a toe loop. A pivot forces you to cross your feet.

Yeah don't worry about toe-waltzing it until you get more speed. You gotta develop the pivot really well at first--with enough practice this eventually looks like a really smooth, non-toe-waltzy toe loop.

I think all of the adult skaters toe-waltzing the toeloop who did not start practicing as a child or do not have a good coach.
I never heard about connecting the privot to the toeloop practice...however, most turn their left shoulder (if counterclockwise) before toepicking and turn already half around and then jumping from forward like the waltz jump, just from the toe. Right would be after the 3turn you have the left arm forward in front of you and the right beside you. Then you pull the arm+shoulder at the same time around with the toepick. So you start jumping from backward, this is harder but not cheated. As I started doing toeloop, I did not had a coach and I did it wrong at first too.

ETA: Actually, thinking about it, if I pivot, wouldn't my left foot (my picking foot) be behind my right foot? how do I get it in front after I take off?

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Yes, your left foot will be behind your right foot. But as you start to jump you start to turn, and so your right foot will lead as you jump and your left foot will follow. And your left foot will go in front as you turn, and hen as you complete the rotation your right foot will be behind you to land on.

The pivot to practice is the right outside one, with the non-picking foot travelling to your left, and you should work on being on a true outside edge when you pivot, because in the jump you need to press on that outside edge before you take off. I have found that I have to push my hips forward and bend my knees to maintain that outside edge in the pivot and in the jump. It's really easy to get onto a flat, which doesn't help you get the right momentum for the takeoff.

A similar exercise to the pivot is to go backwards on a RBO edge on a hockey circle (slow), reach back and stick your left toe in behind the right foot, then draw back until the right foot is on the ice to the *left* of the picking foot. At this point you should still be backwards. You can hop straight up off the toepick to simulate takeoff, or you can try a mazurka. Or you can just keep the toe in the ice and do a right back outside 3-turn with the right foot, which will turn you forward once the right foot passes the left. Whichever variation you do, look at your tracings afterward and make sure you picked on the circle.

Dumb question...why to practice a privot if you just need to pick behind your left foot to jump? A privot is actually a difficult move that needs a lot of flexibility of one foot, some may not be able to do it...

Because you don't just need to pick behind the foot, at least not the way my coach teaches it, you have to be able to draw the feet together before jumping. The draw together IS a pivot, you just don't keep going around, you jump.

Dumb question...why to practice a privot if you just need to pick behind your left foot to jump? A privot is actually a difficult move that needs a lot of flexibility of one foot, some may not be able to do it...

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If you are jumping CCW direction, you are picking behing right leg, not left.

Another thing that really changed my swirly little toe waltz into a nice light toe loop was to consciously get down into my knees and then pop up instead of trying to turn around myself. The deeper knee bend before picking truly helped me.

PLEASE NOTE: I'm not an instuctor and have no idea what I'm talking about, so take this with a grain of salt and check with your coach! And coaches - please shoot this down if I'm wrong - I hate giving out crap info.