Thursday, September 23, 2010

I get jealous of other boobies

Breastfeeding is hard. (for me)Even with my lactation lady and my fairy breastmother. And now I probably fed my baby beetles the news said yesterday as he is supplemented with some formula when I can't pump like a rock star.And let me tell you- I am not a rock star with the pump.I like being good at things.I get jealous of other boobies.It's annoying really.

I am so sorry. And I have been there. I had horrible low supply with Charlie. My milk never really came in. Taking 160 mg of Dom a day, pumping like a mad woman, nursing as often as I could -- and still I could only produce about 8 ounces a day. I managed to eeek out a nursing relationship for 10 months. I cherish every minute I was able to nurse Charlie. Too few.

And I am totally pissed at Abbott! We still feed Chuck a bottle or two a day of follow up formula because he hates milk. I have two empty containers and one brand new one -- which means I fed my baby several pounds of beetle juice. Well, guess who is busting open the full can to make three 1/3 full containers to get 3x the refund? F@*k Abbott.

Well - you're a rockstar for trying. I had serious problems with Oliver (my 9 lb newborn lost a full pound in the first week!) and pretty much gave up after a month. Then I didn't even bother with the twins. If I couldn't do it right for one... Some guilt there of course, but I don't beat myself up over it. I DO admire those who persevere though. Supermoms all of you!

I had to supplement my second, and you know what? It took so much of the pressure off, and it allowed me so much more freedom than exclusively breastfeeding, that it made it a far better experience. And my supply was probably better without the anxiety of wondering if my daughter was getting enough. And so I ended up breast feeding for more than a year, rather than giving up early. And I gave up pumping because I got almost nothing.

I only made it 6 weeks, got mastitis and quit. It was so hard. I had to pump the whole time since Dex was a preemie. Lord it SUCKED. Try not to beat yourself up - you do the best you can and he will be fine whatever you feed him. Well. Besides Snickers. That would probably cause a nut allergy as well as choke him.