Sobriety Online

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Hey Phillygirl, Kudos to you!!! You don't have to register. Check the list of meetings (home page of this web site), choose the time and location, and go. You can attend as many meetings as you wish every day, every week, every month. These meetings are for us, to find help and support. When you go to a meeting, talk to the person who's in charge for that day about getting a sponsor. And feel free to come back if you have more questions.

Meetings are open to anyone that needs help. You just need to find one and then go there. There is no fee. AA is self supporting so they usually pass just around a hat at some point for donations which is usually a $1.00 or whatever you can donate.

As far as meeting other people you may want to go a little bit early, like 10 minutes before the meeting. Usually there are other people standing around talking. Go up to them, introduce yourself (first name only). Tell them a little bit about yourself and ask them about the meeting. They have all been in your situation before (first meeting) and will be glad to help.

There are special meetings for people just starting out, but it is not required that you go to them only.

Communication is important. At some point they will ask if anybody wants to share what's on their mind. Typically you are given several minutes, depending on the number of people and length of the meeting. If you are first starting you might want to hang back and just observe for a meeting or two to get the hang of it. I wouldn't tell them my life story the first meeting, maybe just what is really bugging me that day. There is no discussion at the meeting. You get to have your say for several minutes without interruption. If you do want feedback, I recommend staying after the meeting and again going up to people and just join in their conversation. Again, they have all been in your situation before (first meeting) and will be glad to help.

Sponsors: At the meetings I go to, they usually ask if there is anybody new that night (raise your hand) and then they ask if there is anybody with over a year of being sober that would like to sponsor someone (they raise their hands). Take a look around and try to remember who raised their hands. You can get a better idea of what they are about when they speak later on. There are different types of sponsors - short term and long term, they both start out short term just in case you don't get along . After the meeting go up to a person who raised their hand earlier and say you need help and you were wondering if they could help you in the meantime while you find a sponsor. This gives you both an out if the relationship doesn't work out. You need help immediately but without the long term commitment. The sponsor does wants to help but it doesn't always work out.

Just listen to people and talk to the ones who you think are on the right path and not just going to say what you want to hear (which hasn't worked so far).

I am also new to the site and new to the idea of Sobriety. I went to my first meeting this past Sunday and def. enjoyed it. I actually went with someone I knew "just as support" but i actually went for myself. I will be going back. Everyone was very nice and I didn't even raise my hand to say it was my first time b/c I still wasn't sure at that point if it was for me. After the meeting someone asked me if I was there for myself or for the other person and I said it was to be determined. They gave me their phone number and said if I needed help or advise to please call. I found this meeting very easy going, helpful, supportive and non-judgemental.