This Great White Shark Choking To Death On A Sea Lion Is One More Reason To Never Visit Australia

Oh hey, have I mentioned recently how Australia is a nightmare hell place that you could not pay me any amount of money to visit? Oh, you know, just gigantic great white sharks and then something even more terrifying than great white sharks that is actually eating great white sharks and man-eating crocodiles and snakes that eat crocodiles — WHY WOULD ANYBODY LIVE HERE? Just move away, en masse, and leave the land to the various monsters that inhabit it.

Case in point: Another great white shark turned up dangerously close to a public beach this week, with the ailment of having tried to swallow a f*cking sea lion whole. Rookie mistake, my friend. In a statement from the Western Australia Department of Fisheries, because this is the sort of thing they need to put out press releases about:

“This could explain why the shark was exhibiting such unusual behaviour in shallow waters off Coronation Beach. It is possible that the shark was trying to dislodge the blockage,” Dr McAuley said.

“Such a large object may have damaged the shark’s internal organs or impeded water flow into his gills, contributing to his death. Alternatively, the shark may have accidentally become stranded in his attempts to get rid of the obstruction.”

No. Thanks. Meanwhile, some civilians caught the dying shark on camera, and they’re all just like, “He’s not very happy now, is he, this fella?” NO, I RECON HE’S NOT, MATE.