Overcoming Loneliness in Manassas, VA—Counselors and Coaches

Being lonely in a crowded room may be a cliché, but like most sayings, it has an element of truth. With the advent of social media, the phrase may be even more true. In many ways, the world is more connected than ever. Instagram. FaceTime. Facebook. Google Chat. Snapchat. Twitter. If people have their phone with them, they are never alone. In an instant, they could be video chatting with people from all over the world. Yet, the growing problems of isolation and loneliness are well studied and documented.

Being with people and connecting with them are two different issues.

In many ways, the modern world allows people to be together, but not necessarily connect. This feeling of disconnection leads to the feelings of loneliness. For example, sharing a picture of a gourmet meal on social media is a very different experience than sharing a future hope with a friend. Overcoming loneliness means forming these deeper connections where people can share themselves with one another.

“Our uniqueness makes us special, makes perception valuable—but it can also make us lonely. This loneliness is different from being ‘alone’: You can be lonely even surrounded by people. The feeling I’m talking about stems from the sense that we can never fully share the truth of who we are. I experienced this acutely at an early age.” —Amy Tan

Many people are working with a counselor or a coach to learn how to share more of their truth, as Amy Tan suggests. These people are initiating face-to-face conversations and are using their social media networks to make deeper connections. They are sharing their hopes and fears as well as their selfies. In the process, they are experiencing less isolation. The good news is that anyone can learn the social skills it takes to connect with other people and decrease loneliness.

The counselors and therapists at Thriveworks Manassas understand the challenges that people today as they form community, and we have helped many clients overcome isolation and build up strong support networks.

Reducing Isolation and Building Community

A hundred years ago, many people were born, raised, lived, and died within the same community. The friends they had in school were the same friends who supported them during hard times as an adult. Communities had deep roots.

Today, leaving one’s home town is the norm. Pursing educational and professional opportunities often requires that people leave the community where they were born. With each move and each job change, new friendships and new communities must be formed, but doing so is easier said than done. Many people today have no close friends and live far away from their family of origin.

This reality feels very bleak, but loneliness is not inevitable. People can build meaningful and deep community. They may not know how, but social skills are just that—skills that can be learned and improved. There are ways people can learn to connect with others. For example, they can

Reimagine Community.
Community may not look like it did 100 years ago. People may not work and live in the same town where they were born, but community can be anything and anywhere.

What does community mean to you? For some, community means joining a book club at the public library. For some, it might mean coaching a youth soccer team. For others, it may mean moving into the same apartment complex with their friends. Think about where you feel connected. How can you pursue those experiences?

Just like community can be anything, it can also be anywhere. Community may be a rural town with its own rhythm and rituals. Community may be a busy city where corner stores are open all the time. When done well, community can even be online. If people can be known and be themselves, then they can form community.

Pursue Inner Circle Friends.
Making acquaintances is fairly easy, but taking those relationships deeper is challenging. However, people need deep friendship—inner circle friends. These are friends whom you know and trust. Friends are in your inner circle if you…

Interact with them in a different context than where you originally met them. The relationship of an acquaintance ends when the context changes, but a true connection survives a shift in context.

Can spend time with just them. Poker nights, shopping, golf, manicures…these activities are great, but true friends can cancel the agenda and just connect when necessary. There is no need for an added activity or a group for the relationship to continue.

Trust them with your hopes and frustrations, and they trust you with theirs. Everyone needs a safe place to share and be vulnerable. True friends respect each other.

Coaching for Loneliness with Thriveworks Manassas

If you are feeling isolated and alone, know that many other people are feeling the same way. You are not alone in your loneliness. The coaches at Thriveworks Manassas have worked with many clients who are experiencing isolation, and we have seen that many people have people in their lives whom they care about. They are just have difficulty bridging the gap between being together and truly connecting. Our professionals have equipped these clients with the social skills they need to connect and to build deeper friendships.

If you are ready to start building a community and feeling less lonely, know that Thriveworks Manassas has appointments available for overcoming loneliness. We offer evening and weekend sessions, and we accept most forms of insurance.

People Love Our Providers!

Depression

★★★★★

I believe my depression is coming from the lack of education, I have and the loss of so many jobs. It's findin...Read more

g but hard to keep a job. I'm embarrassed it has been hindering me for many years now I can't stand it I've been trying to get help for a while now and don't know where to go I am on suppression medication. I see a doctor every two weeks I have talked to him about this and until u was blacking the blue in the face. I think he sees it now. Thank good

Great first experience

Lisa

★★★★★

I started with Thriveworks and Lisa 3-4 months ago and I was nervous about telling a "stranger" my deepest iss...Read more

ues and things I'm not always comfortable admitting myself. I have to say she has been amazing through an really tough relationship break and other things I was or am going through in life. She makes you feel comfortable and truly listens, providing support and options for situations which allow me to be able to look at situations differently. She has made an incredible improvement on my life and I always look forward to meeting with her. It has become a breath of fresh air for me. She is amazing and I consider her a friend. You can't go wrong.

Depression

★★★★★

I believe my depression is coming from the lack of education, I have and the loss of so many jobs. It's findin...Read more

g but hard to keep a job. I'm embarrassed it has been hindering me for many years now I can't stand it I've been trying to get help for a while now and don't know where to go I am on suppression medication. I see a doctor every two weeks I have talked to him about this and until u was blacking the blue in the face. I think he sees it now. Thank good

Great first experience

Lisa

★★★★★

I started with Thriveworks and Lisa 3-4 months ago and I was nervous about telling a "stranger" my deepest iss...Read more

ues and things I'm not always comfortable admitting myself. I have to say she has been amazing through an really tough relationship break and other things I was or am going through in life. She makes you feel comfortable and truly listens, providing support and options for situations which allow me to be able to look at situations differently. She has made an incredible improvement on my life and I always look forward to meeting with her. It has become a breath of fresh air for me. She is amazing and I consider her a friend. You can't go wrong.

So far I am liking my sessions and my counselor

My counselor is great

Lisa Cornelius- My wonderful experience with her.

★★★★★

I worked with Lisa Cornelius for more than 6 months and she really is amazing. She helped me through my strugg...Read more

les by giving me strategies that could help me involve my well being. She is honest and she will connect with your situation by putting herself in your shoes. I've never connected with a therapist like I have with her. She really knows what she is doing. I highly recommend her!

Counseling appreciation

★★★★★

A note of thanks to my counselor Lisa Cornelius. I have seen her for 2 years now and through our sessions an f...Read more

inding that I am a good person who has needs and a future that I never knew at 72 I coukd look forward to. Our lives go full circle sometimes and after bad things happen we start to think we have no right to try to be anyone but who others think we should be....not true! Hopefully Lisa and I can continue this journey and I can learn to relax in the real me and be content and happy with myself...thank you Lisa ....

Ms. Lisa

★★★★★

Ms. Lisa is a very amazing counselor. She helps you understand and can relate to you, which makes you feel bet...Read more

ter. Her way of counseling is different from past counselor. It was more dull with my past counselor, but with Ms. Lisa it is different. It is better to me. I definitely recommend Ms. Lisa because everytime I leave I feel lighter and a little bit better. 😊