Life After Christian Fundamentalism Discussions - Atheist Nexus2018-03-20T03:41:49Zhttp://atheistnexus.org/group/lacf/forum?groupUrl=lacf&feed=yes&xn_auth=noAlone and Adrift in a Hostile Universetag:atheistnexus.org,2012-12-16:2182797:Topic:21238572012-12-16T18:22:13.910ZMark Tullosshttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/MarkTulloss
<p><span class="font-size-4">Good Sunday Morning, </span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Life is busy and I'm not very good at this "facebook" culture thing, however, I am in need of some guidance and you all seem most eager to engage. </span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Thank you for the warm reception Atheist Nexus has extended to me. I suspect I have never felt this alone in my life, and it is scaring the hell out of me. I've not yet devoted enough time to pursue any group…</span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Good Sunday Morning, </span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Life is busy and I'm not very good at this "facebook" culture thing, however, I am in need of some guidance and you all seem most eager to engage. </span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Thank you for the warm reception Atheist Nexus has extended to me. I suspect I have never felt this alone in my life, and it is scaring the hell out of me. I've not yet devoted enough time to pursue any group involvement, until today. Still a bit skittish, I guess.</span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Though I am certain /confident about my decision to abandon "The Faith", I am very UN-certain about the way forward and what I suspect for me is "Atheist-by-Default". I am truly concerned about just replacing one faith for another, that is, to operate under ANY paradigm using the same principles of faith I have exercised for the past 30 years . I am reading voraciously, but I am sinking into a black pit faster than I know how to dig. I wake up with terrible bouts of anxiety most mornings and terrible bouts of guilt as I sent my family off to church without me. My christian friends are hammering hard (in Love, of course!) to see me back within the fold. I cannot go back, but I can't afford to go crazy, either! </span></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">I was "born again" at age 16 in 1978 at the explosion of the Charismatic Movement. Not quiet as hardcore as what Rich Lyons came out of, but very fundamentalist. <span>I helped start New Life Church in the '80s and watched 14000 people revile and reject Ted Haggard when he "fell" in 2006. </span>I continued as a fully committed, invested member of "The Body of Christ" until last November, 2011 when, after 5 years of reflection and struggle, I announced to my family that I have abandoned my faith. My family has been downright supportive, though not understanding. They remain believers and I'm fine with that.</span><br/></p>
<p><span class="font-size-4">Certainly, at first, I felt like I had slipped unnoticed through a hole in the fence surrounding my "Christian Ghetto" .</span><br/><span><span class="font-size-4">I felt exhilarated, dancing unashamed in the sunlight! I knew at once <em>I have chosen to never go back.</em> However, as night began to fall... over this past year I see my efforts in the past 30 years at "thinking Christian" have been thorough and effective and I find</span> <span class="font-size-4">myself ill equipped to manage my own destiny,</span> <font size="4">The full force of my conclusion that god does not exist (and all which that implies!) has me shaken to the very core! I am terrified by the permanence of death, Crushed by the prospect that my 19 yr. old son, who died in 2010, did not survive the grave, <em><strong>struggling mightily to redefine meaning in a universe that does not endow us with meaning.</strong></em> </font></span></p>
<p><br/><br/><span class="font-size-4">My head feels empty like a very large house from which the long overdue departure of once invited relatives has finally come! My head and my heart are my own, the transition has been as natural as... waking up, refreshed and excited about a new day! I don't wish to go back, NOR do I wish to simply replace faith in the "Word of God" for faith in the Words of Darwin or Dawkins or Dennett. I'm wandering about in this big, beautiful house, excited by the possibilities, but fairly overwhelmed by the scope of the task to tear down the parts of my old world view that are rotten and untrustworthy and to rebuild or to start afresh somehow.</span><br/><span class="font-size-4">Look, I could go on for pages here... (it's been refreshing! I've no one to really talk to), but I think you get it!</span></p>
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<p></p> How do people de-brainwash their children after waking up?tag:atheistnexus.org,2012-11-04:2182797:Topic:20931912012-11-04T05:56:01.162ZStuart Khttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/StuartK
<p>In the last few years I have transformed from elder, preacher and worship director to atheist, but my children haven't made the transition. They still want to thank god when giving thanks, and like watching the veggie-tales videos we filled their minds with.</p>
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<p>How do we open their minds without destroying their capacity to trust us? (The children are 11, 8 and 4.)</p>
<p>In the last few years I have transformed from elder, preacher and worship director to atheist, but my children haven't made the transition. They still want to thank god when giving thanks, and like watching the veggie-tales videos we filled their minds with.</p>
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<p>How do we open their minds without destroying their capacity to trust us? (The children are 11, 8 and 4.)</p> UU Churchtag:atheistnexus.org,2012-09-09:2182797:Topic:20486082012-09-09T20:48:44.881ZCD Freehttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/CDFree
<p>Does anyone here attend a UU Church, or have any experience of one? From what I've researched, it looks quite interesting and inclusive, not shoving their views down your throat, allowed to believe what you think is right etc.</p>
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<p>Does anyone here attend a UU Church, or have any experience of one? From what I've researched, it looks quite interesting and inclusive, not shoving their views down your throat, allowed to believe what you think is right etc.</p>
<p></p> Hurttag:atheistnexus.org,2012-09-05:2182797:Topic:20452572012-09-05T00:45:49.898ZCD Freehttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/CDFree
<p>How do you get over the hurt of Chrisitian Fundamentalism?</p>
<p>How do you get over the hurt of Chrisitian Fundamentalism?</p> Have You Heard The Like???tag:atheistnexus.org,2012-09-05:2182797:Topic:20450762012-09-05T00:44:19.023ZCD Freehttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/CDFree
<p>For a while there I was interested in Christianity, and befriended some Christians online, one in particular a fundie preacher. He was keen to chat at first, but at the end despite my attempts to tell him I wanted to learn, he pushed me away, not once but numerous times. That was the lightbulb moment for me, the moment when I thought what am I doing here. Anyone have similar experiences?</p>
<p>For a while there I was interested in Christianity, and befriended some Christians online, one in particular a fundie preacher. He was keen to chat at first, but at the end despite my attempts to tell him I wanted to learn, he pushed me away, not once but numerous times. That was the lightbulb moment for me, the moment when I thought what am I doing here. Anyone have similar experiences?</p> Walking Awaytag:atheistnexus.org,2012-08-23:2182797:Topic:20357122012-08-23T19:56:32.541ZCD Freehttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/CDFree
<p>I'm guessing many here walked away from one religion or another. What religion did you walk away from? Did you look at other religions, if so what ones? What made you settle on Atheism?</p>
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<p>I'm guessing many here walked away from one religion or another. What religion did you walk away from? Did you look at other religions, if so what ones? What made you settle on Atheism?</p>
<p></p> The God Murderstag:atheistnexus.org,2012-08-20:2182797:Topic:20333062012-08-20T19:51:34.976ZStifyn Emryshttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/StifynEmrys
<p>Just ran across an interesting site called <a href="http://www.thegodmurders.com/Jesus%20II.html" target="_blank">"The God Murders."</a> Is anyone else familiar with this? Reactions?</p>
<p>Just ran across an interesting site called <a href="http://www.thegodmurders.com/Jesus%20II.html" target="_blank">"The God Murders."</a> Is anyone else familiar with this? Reactions?</p> Real Fundie???tag:atheistnexus.org,2012-08-16:2182797:Topic:20308212012-08-16T20:44:28.400ZCD Freehttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/CDFree
<p>Not sure if you would class me as a real ex-fundie LOL. I spent a few years chatting online to a very fundie person, although even at my height of Christianity they never managed to convert me to creationism, or go to church. Another thing that got to me was their insistance that females couldn't be leaders or preachers, I could never subscribe to that.</p>
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<p>The behaviour of that person changed drastically over a few months to a person I barely recognised as the same person, and…</p>
<p>Not sure if you would class me as a real ex-fundie LOL. I spent a few years chatting online to a very fundie person, although even at my height of Christianity they never managed to convert me to creationism, or go to church. Another thing that got to me was their insistance that females couldn't be leaders or preachers, I could never subscribe to that.</p>
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<p>The behaviour of that person changed drastically over a few months to a person I barely recognised as the same person, and it was at that point I realised what a pile of crock Christianity was and how hypocritical Christians actually were.......and breathe, LOL</p> Dealing with uncertaintytag:atheistnexus.org,2012-03-22:2182797:Topic:18959582012-03-22T01:12:51.042ZLauren Bhttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/LaurenB
<p>Hey there. I was a deeply religious Christian until age 20 or so, struggled for 3 or 4 years before being able to confidently call myself atheist. That was 4 or 5 years ago, I have rebuilt my identity and belief system and am happily living a richer, more loving life. I feel at peace with where I am, much more at peace with where I’ve been; couldn’t, but wouldn’t, go back... Maybe it’s just a personal problem, or life—but there’s one thing that I haven’t been able to and don’t know how to…</p>
<p>Hey there. I was a deeply religious Christian until age 20 or so, struggled for 3 or 4 years before being able to confidently call myself atheist. That was 4 or 5 years ago, I have rebuilt my identity and belief system and am happily living a richer, more loving life. I feel at peace with where I am, much more at peace with where I’ve been; couldn’t, but wouldn’t, go back... Maybe it’s just a personal problem, or life—but there’s one thing that I haven’t been able to and don’t know how to replace after giving up faith: Everything used to be okay, no matter what. I could pray, and not worry, for the most part, about things out of my control. I think it’s a positive that I can’t just be at peace, and cop out (leave it to “God”), when I do have choices to make and can take action. I am getting better at seeing multiple paths and possibilities and do have a wonderful support system of friends. I’m just not great with uncertainty, and I don’t know what to do with life’s bad, now that there’s not a larger purpose for it all, no reason to believe that things will culminate with good… I think practicing mindfulness may be the closest I’ve come, or the most promising help—to learn to focus consciousness and give attention to the present moment with acceptance. It’s definitely a practice that takes practice, but it provides some sense of calm, and control learning to have that focus. Still, I have a hard time. Any suggestions other than anxiety medication? What do you do with hard times and uncertainty without the belief that everything happens for a reason and there is a positive force in control?</p> My Rantroductiontag:atheistnexus.org,2011-11-25:2182797:Topic:17482202011-11-25T20:18:26.021ZAnthony Beckerhttp://atheistnexus.org/profile/AnthonyBecker
<p>Hey all.</p>
<p>Okay, here goes nothing: I'm just getting out. Here I am, about to graduate high school and head off to college, and suddenly I find myself no longer believing in the Christianity of my childhood.</p>
<p>Why? Because I decided to obey the Bible. I Thessalonians 5:21 says "Prove all things."</p>
<p>Prove all things? I'd been listening to (admittedly uneducated and a bit disagreeable) preachers all my life, and approaching the Bible with the idea that it can't contradict…</p>
<p>Hey all.</p>
<p>Okay, here goes nothing: I'm just getting out. Here I am, about to graduate high school and head off to college, and suddenly I find myself no longer believing in the Christianity of my childhood.</p>
<p>Why? Because I decided to obey the Bible. I Thessalonians 5:21 says "Prove all things."</p>
<p>Prove all things? I'd been listening to (admittedly uneducated and a bit disagreeable) preachers all my life, and approaching the Bible with the idea that it can't contradict itself, therefore any apparent contradictions are explainable.</p>
<p>I wanted to be 100% sure about my faith. I believed I would be.</p>
<p>Instead, I started realizing things like, "I can't really define 'salvation', you know, mom? That's why I don't walk around giving out gospel tracts any more."</p>
<p>And, "If I only accept proof from my side of the argument, how do I know that someone else doesn't have a point?"</p>
<p>And, "Wait a minute: My pastor has NO idea what he's talking about when it comes to science. How do I know any other creationists do?"</p>
<p>Soon enough, by the moving of what I would have once called Satan, and now am tempted to call Fate, my atheistic uncle emailed me. This was not the first time he'd emailed me in an attempt to "attack" my beliefs. It would not be the last. For in the correspondence that followed, he decided not to give me up to my indoctrination. Fortunately, I had invited this.</p>
<p>"Scientists," he said, "go through incredibly rigorous study while in school, usually because they want to make a contribution; not because of money, because usually they won't make a lot of it. I find it disturbing when a fundamentalist Christian with little to no education thinks he knows better than scientists... Do you believe in Noah's flood?"</p>
<p>I gave him my reasons for believing in the flood, while providing him the opportunity to "further test my indoctrination". I also conceded that it was foolish for the uneducated to believe they know better.</p>
<p>And so I got to doin' the math about Noah's ark.</p>
<p>And so I got to researchin' the claims put in my head by the venerable Kent Hovind (comets only last so long, there is no continental drift, carbon dating doesn't work).</p>
<p>And so I got to lookin' at the Bible's contradictions.</p>
<p>And so I got to praying, "God, if you want me to believe in you, you had better give me some proof <em>really</em> soon."</p>
<p>And I was confident that even if I was wrong, it was God's will for me to seek the truth; and if I turned against him, I knew he would still be merciful. That's the kind of Christianity I had. I won't say I regret any of it.</p>
<p>I started with the assumption that (1) There can be no contradictions in reality, (2) My observations can be trusted, and (3) The Bible is true.</p>
<p>Strike that third one.</p>
<p>So here I am. Am I an "atheist"? Probably... I'm not a theist because I'm pretty sure design is bunk, and, furthermore, I believe in natural causation. Agnostic? That's fairly useless, and will probably just make Christians think I'm looking for excuses. Atheist? Can we disprove the existence of God? I don't know. But I think we can quite readily debunk pretty much any religious philosophy out there.</p>
<p>You know what ticks me off, though? All my friends believe this bunk. My family believes it. I've got a little sister who believes it and will grow up living her life based on it. My step-dad will probably disown me. That will hurt since he's the only dad I've ever known. This frees me to look for my biofather, though. I wonder if he's at all rational...</p>
<p>Oh yeah, first I've actually got to tell someone. Nah, I'll be a wuss and wait until college. No way I'm wasting my money on a fundy "university" though. Then I'll also have friends and mentors to support me as I watch my whole childhood social circle fall to bits.</p>
<p>You know what sucks? I gave like my first $5,000 to a bunch of nutters, thinking I was "laying up my treasure in heaven". Can't blame them for being sincere. Probably can blame them for robbing me. That's money I'll never get back. Unless I make money off this atheism stuff.</p>
<p>Shit. Amazing how life can change in like, a week. I was protecting the flood story a few days ago. fml lolol</p>
<p>Please help me. You're supposed to be big, mean, brainwashed God-haters. Prove me wrong, I pray you. Rant over.</p>