I can understand feeling it's a bit petty because they're only bows, but it's also your time and effort and once the bows are gone you have to spend time making more. I think the PPs who suggest only bringing enough for yourself are right. If you want, you could offer to show the 'borrowers' how to make the bows, but you're not obligated to at all.

I would tell them no, you cannot have any more bows. I take my own, personal time to make them, you can too, or I have this amount of time, I can make you (#) of bows a week for $ each bow. If you WANT to do this. If not, "I'm sorry, that won't be possible." If they ask why, "Because I have only made enough bows for my customers today. Supplies are provided so that you can make your own".

I fully agree here.

These are things you have paid for yourself and made yourself. They are your possessions. If someone came and asked you for items from your work lunch to eat, instead of preparing food of their own, it would be absurd. Yet this is the same situation. I would either charge for every bow, no exceptions (so they stop trying to get freebies) or, since you don't want to go back into the whole selling bows part, just say no. Frankly, it's rude that they ask you at all to have your own possessions to have as their own if they know that you are unwilling to part with them.

Explain that you don't have as many as you used to because they take so long to make, so you don't have enough to give away--not even one or two. I would keep restating this (or something to this effect) over and over to any objections: "but you gave me two last week!" "Sorry, they take so long to make that I just don't have as many anymore, not even one spare." "But it's only two!" "Yes, but because they take so long to make, I don't have as many as I used to, so I can't even spare one." etc. etc.

Thanks for the advice, everyone.

I think I am going to use something like the above.

I can't really show them how to make my bows. I use a different type of ribbon than the Company Ribbon. The Company Ribbon is too thick for me and it frays. Company Ribbon is good for making other types of bows, but I don't know how to make those types.

I have this problem, just to a lesser extent, with my bandanas. I use my own sometimes.

I don't like the idea of bringing in just enough for the day. The reason for that is that I like to have an assortment of colors. When clients come in with their children, I will let the kid pick which color bows they want. That kind of thing. So, I do like to have a variety of bows with me. Even the adults like to pick their bows sometimes.

You're not being petty at all. You are being taken advantage of, and it doesn't really matter that it's just bows or ribbons. Your coworkers are getting something for absolutely nothing. I think your plan to explain that you spend your own money and personal time making these bows, and it's just for your clients. They should learn to make their own if they don't want to use the company stuff.

It doesn't matter that you won't use your supplies up in any given day. You still only brought them in for your own customers.

So just say, "No, sorry, these are mine--I make them with my own time and my own money. I can't give them to you guys anymore."

I bet you don't need to make a big deal about this. I can't imagine them thinking you should buy ribbon, lace, gems, hot glue, etc., and just give it to them.

All you have to do is push back a little bit, and most of them will completely understand.

There may be an entitled person or two, but just repeat your sentence in a "I can't believe you don't understand!" amazed tone: "I make them with my own time and my own money. I don't want to give them away anymore. And I don't have time to make some to sell."

(I also agree--they aren't borrowing anything. If what you were doing was making extra fancy bows w/ the Company Ribbon, and they asked you to make bows for them, and then you ran out of your stash of Company Ribbon, then I'd say they were borrowing supplies.)

I'd bring in only as many as I expected to use and say "Sorry, they're really time consuming to make so I only have enough to get me through the day." If someone complains "But you've always shared before!" say "Yes which meant I had to make a bunch extra and, as I said, I don't have enough time." or "When I have shared I have occasionally ran out before the end of the day which upsets my last clients."

If there's a time you'd be willing to teach a few coworkers how to make them, say on a break or if you wanted to go in early or stay late ONE time, you could offer that. I absolutely don't think you're obligated but if someone doesn't care to learn to make their bows they can't really blame you for not wanting to make them, either.

Edited to add - As far as coworkers asking you to make fancy bows with company ribbon I'd do it if I had time and, if not, be honest. "Sorry but I need to do X." Maybe you could work out a deal where someone will take care of a task you don't care for while you make them a pile of bows?

This is what I was thinking, too. And I agree you are not being petty. Day after day that would really grind on me, as well.

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I would tell them no, you cannot have any more bows. I take my own, personal time to make them, you can too, or I have this amount of time, I can make you (#) of bows a week for $ each bow. If you WANT to do this. If not, "I'm sorry, that won't be possible." If they ask why, "Because I have only made enough bows for my customers today. Supplies are provided so that you can make your own".

I fully agree here.

These are things you have paid for yourself and made yourself. They are your possessions. If someone came and asked you for items from your work lunch to eat, instead of preparing food of their own, it would be absurd. Yet this is the same situation. I would either charge for every bow, no exceptions (so they stop trying to get freebies) or, since you don't want to go back into the whole selling bows part, just say no. Frankly, it's rude that they ask you at all to have your own possessions to have as their own if they know that you are unwilling to part with them.

Explain that you don't have as many as you used to because they take so long to make, so you don't have enough to give away--not even one or two. I would keep restating this (or something to this effect) over and over to any objections: "but you gave me two last week!" "Sorry, they take so long to make that I just don't have as many anymore, not even one spare." "But it's only two!" "Yes, but because they take so long to make, I don't have as many as I used to, so I can't even spare one." etc. etc.

Thanks for the advice, everyone.

I think I am going to use something like the above.

I can't really show them how to make my bows. I use a different type of ribbon than the Company Ribbon. The Company Ribbon is too thick for me and it frays. Company Ribbon is good for making other types of bows, but I don't know how to make those types.

I have this problem, just to a lesser extent, with my bandanas. I use my own sometimes.

I don't like the idea of bringing in just enough for the day. The reason for that is that I like to have an assortment of colors. When clients come in with their children, I will let the kid pick which color bows they want. That kind of thing. So, I do like to have a variety of bows with me. Even the adults like to pick their bows sometimes.

I would say, "I'm sorry, I can't give these out anymore. I buy my own materials, and I make them on my own time. If you want, you can pick up some WhateverBrandRibbonYouUse and I'd be happy to show you how to make them."

Or - perhaps you can offer them a trade, if they can make the bows with the company ribbon?

Are there just a few colours/styles? Could you keep a bunch hidden in your bag or something and then just keep one of each style out for clients to choose. That way you could also say I need all these for clients as well. Do you all work side by side and the other groomers see what you do? Do you show the clients the bows ahead of time or after a grooming?

I will admit I often find saying no is easier said than done because I do like to be a people pleaser sometimes and it can be hard to say no without wanting to give a reason. With coworkers you are around them all day and drawing a line between being nice and being taken advantage of is hard.

You aren't being petty - If I were your coworkers, I wouldn't ask you for something you had paid for and spent personal time making. I think they are expecting a lot of you when they make that request.

You aren't being petty - If I were your coworkers, I wouldn't ask you for something you had paid for and spent personal time making. I think they are expecting a lot of you when they make that request.

'Hey, sorry, I won't be able to make bows for you anymore. I realize it seems like just a bow...but really it takes 15 minutes per bow, and you ask for 8 bows a week and so does Mary! So that is 2 hours of my time and I just don't have that. I am sure you can appreciate that!"

Just curious, are you paid per animal that you groom or a set amount per hour that you work? You don't have to answer that here, but I think it makes a difference.

If you are all paid per animal, then you are using your time making bows at home to maximize your income. By having the bows ready to go, you save time on the job and can groom more animals than if you took work time to make bows (any bows, plain or fancy).

When you give your bows away to your co-workers, you are giving away the advantage that making bows at home gives you--and you are given that advantage to your co-workers, to say nothing of the money you spend on ribbon and embellishments.

If you are all paid a set hour wage or salary, then you are artificially boosting your co-workers' productivity. If your employer expects everyone to make bows during work time with their ribbon, you are letting your co-workers work faster by providing them with pre-made bows. This might have an effect during performance reviews--they would come out looking like faster workers than they really are.

In your shoes, especially since you are spending your own money on the materials for the bows, I'd just stop giving them away. I would use the explanation that you don't have time to make more than your own supply of bows. If you argued that the bows cost you money for ribbons and such, they could always offer to pay you for the supplies. But it's harder for them to argue that you have more time. And if they argue that you have lots of bows at your work station, you can just tell them that you make a week's supply at a time, and those bows have to last you all week, and again, you are sorry, but you can't give them away any more.

There will probably be push-back for a few days. You will have to stand firm on this, because if you cave in after saying you won't give the bows away anymore, it will be twice as hard to attempt this all over again.

And you certainly aren't being petty. These are your bows that you spent your time and your money and your skills at bow-making on.

Your co-workers are pretty entitled, if they think you should just be giving the bows away.

I worked the other night, but it was a pretty slow night because of the snow the day before. So, I took in my materials and planned to spend most of the night making bows. I worked with three other people. Two of them were stylists like myself and the other was a bather who has only been with us for three months. Out of those stylists, one of them is the main bow moocher.

Before I even pulled out my materials, the bather approached me and asked me if my bows were a secret, or if I could give her a little lesson on how to make them. She had bought a spool on her own ribbon.

So, I spent some time showing her how to make bows. Even the non bow mooching stylist asked if he could join. We went through the materials that she would need. She didn't realize that it was more then just ribbon. Even the scissors that I use are extra sharp and not your regular house scissors. I told her the cheapest way to get some of the materials. I let her use my stuff for the lesson.

Bow Moocher saw this and said something like "Oh good. Bather can start making bows, since Sio doesn't want to anymore". I told her that I loved making bows, but no, I don't want to spend my time and money supplying other people with them. She got huffy and mumbled some things about how we lend things to each other all the time. I told her it wasn't the same thing. The subject was dropped for the night, so this week I will see if it sunk in.

What really irritates me about this particular bow moocher is the way that she asks. "Sio, I'm gonna need 2 bows for this dog". It does make it easier to say no.

Lend? Unless her clients are returning the bows to you, they aren't being loaned. I hate when people do that. Fortunately it sounds like she knows you won't be giving her anymore bows since she's pouting about it.

I've had a lot of people asking, 'Can I borrow [food item]?' I normally answer, 'No but you can have it. I really don't want it back when you're done with it.' Pedantic, I know, but 'borrowing' a consumable drives me right round the bend.

Sioteh Cat, good for you. I'd talk to your bather and let her know that Mooch is likely to ask for bows. Just so she can be prepared to say no or to charge a price that she's willing to make them for.

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