After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was enough,
as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't strong enough
to nick one.

The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want
to have any more children.
The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix
the problem but it was expensive.
A less costly alternative was to go home, get a firework, light it, put it
in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and 'count to 10.

The Scouser said to the doctor, 'I may not be the smartest guy in the world,
but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going
to help me.'
'Trust me, it will do the job', said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can.
He held the can up to his ear and began to count:
'1, 2, 3, 4, 5,' at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his
legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Scotland , parts of Bradford and anywhere in
Wales ...