Another Suicide?! Slut Shaming Needs To Stop!

Felicia Garcia was a victim of bullying and slut shaming before her suicide. This needs to STOP. | Source: Facebook

We were so devastated to hear about the death of Felicia Garcia. Felicia was a 15-year-old high schooler from Staten Island, New York, who was probably a lot like you–and this week, Felicia killed herself after nonstop harassment, bullying, and slut shaming from classmates. In fact, some of them were harassing Felicia to her face in the very moment that she ended her life. And that’s something they’re going to have to live with for the rest of theirs.

Felicia was rumored to have had a relationship with a member of her school’s football team, which is something that is only her and his business. But apparently a lot of people at her high school thought it was their business too, and bullied Felicia at every turn. One classmate told press, “This poor girl was called a slut. She was teased on Facebook. People knock books out of kids’ hands.”

It’s not like Felicia didn’t try putting a stop to the taunts, either. Some classmates said that she complained to school officials about the bullying, but nothing happened after a mediation session the day that she died–it actually got worse–and now police are investigating the incident.

Here’s what’s even more heartbreaking, and what a lot of bullies don’t realize about their targets: They’re people, and there’s a lot more to them than what people see in the cafeteria or the hallway or on the bus. The people who gave Felicia Garcia Hell for maybe dating a football player or for having piercings or looking different (based on her photo above, we think she was beautiful!) never got past the surface. Felicia, and other bullying targets, are full-fledged human beings. Maybe she liked the same bands as one of the people who pushed her to the edge. She probably had a sense of humor that one of her bullies may have appreciated if they took the time to get to know her or just left her be. The person you watch get picked in algebra may bake the best cookies ever, may have a puppy they adore, or be the best painter since Picasso. But if all you ever know about her is that she’s allegedly a slut, you’re going to miss out on all of that.

Felicia Garcia also had problems aside from the ones she dealt with at school. As if being called a slut to her face every day wasn’t bad enough, she had to deal with it online, then go home to her foster care family (some classmates said Felicia’s birth parents died, but that hasn’t been confirmed yet). She was a frequent runaway. Point being, there are a lot more hardships in people’s lives than you can observe.

It’s super important for us, as girls, to stick together, now more than ever. Slut shaming is not only wrong, but it’s also, whether people realize it or not, an extremely sexist way to try to control women‘s behavior. By making girls and women feel guilty for existing as a sexual being, people–men, women who partake in slut shaming–are holding women back and holding women down. We already have enough to deal with in terms of politicians trying to control what goes on in our vaginas. We don’t need strangers in the hallways hassling us for something that’s not their business and for something that men are just as “guilty” of but face no consequences for. (Notice that the guy Felicia supposedly slept with wasn’t a target? Exactly.)

If you hear anyone called a slut, the only person who should be ashamed is the person who said it. The only person who should feel guilty as a result of slut shaming is the person who does it: Because they are clearly a shortsighted, immature, insecure shell of a person who may well be fearful of his or her own sexuality.

If you take nothing else from this: Please don’t use the word “slut.” And please remember that the person you’re tempted to use the word “slut” for is a person–and every time you use “slut,” you’re only bringing yourself down. You’re better than that, and so is she.

Have you or a pal ever been slut shamed? Does slut shaming happen a lot at your school? What would you have said or done to help Felicia? Tell us in the comments!

To me the worst part about anyone calling a girl a “slut” is that it’s an invalid way to push women, or girls behind men. By calling someone an insult regarding their sexuality, you are proclaiming that they have done something wrong, and impart calling someone a “slut” is saying that when a female tries to copy the actions of a male counter part they will be given a negative reaction by people. It is saying that if a women can get away with something as a guy can then they are equal, which is still a bad idea in the public’s mind. Besides being wrong and insulting to women everywhere, if you hurt someone by name calling in any way, you are setting us all behind for an equal society. So remember to think before you speak!

clairey

sometimes girls i don’t even know and never even talk to call me a ‘sket’ or ‘slag’ it does get me down .A lot of rumors do get spread around me a lot since i am consider popular (but their barely ever true) but i try to be nice to everyone but still people continue to call me things like this a few times its boys ..and feel real sorry for this girl she didn’t deserve it at all,no one does.

Jenna

When I was in high school, someone put a list titled “Puntas” (meaning slut in Spanish) in almost all of the lockers in the school. The list contained popular girls, most of whom barely even took their nose out of a book, let alone dated, but regardless – it was an awful prank to pull. I slept around, but I had a bad home life, and unfortunately, didn’t have anyone telling me about relationships. Calling someone a slut is sad, and cruel. You have no idea what is going on in that person’s life, nor do you need to – it’s personal, unless they are getting hurt from their sex life – such as being unsafe, or being reckless with strangers, etc. The negative effects of bullying and name-calling of any kind can last for years and years into adulthood; I have met several adults whose lives were shaped by how they were ridiculed in high school. Not all are success stories who overcame in the end. Some, like this young lady, are not even alive.

basschick

this seams like a person who honestly felt like she had no place in life. which is a REAL SHAME because she was only 15. people in her possition right now? GET PAST IT!!! it will only get better. you are so young, HIGH SCHOOL especially is not the END it is the BEGINNING! it is a whole different world after. <3

Flip

WHY would someone kill themselves over being called a slut? Gosh
I mean I guess I understand but I don’t think I’d EVER go far enough as to take my life away. It’s seems like alast resort kind of thing.

Justine

If you don’t understand why someone woulddo that, you apparently haven’t been bullied as much as this girl and many others. I know what this feels like. I’ve attempted to take my own life on a few occasions. It hurts so bad to be treated like you’re inferior to eveyone you know.. If your really judging her, You don’t know what its like

MzJayBay

its so sad to see things like this happen. kids are so mean

cgurl

Well at least the football players who were apart of it lost their scholarship. And as someone who lives in Staten island a majority of the island is filled with media brain washed idiots. I feel its just gonna get worst.back in January another teeneager jumped in front of a bus. It was believe Bc she was cyberspace bully. With similar words sulur at her.

Random girl

My so called friends call me a slut and I hate it. I’m only a 14 year old gir. I’m trying to make it through school Im in the 8th grade. Im not in high school if I was I would be crying already even more than I already do. Anyway I have been bullied many times by people who I thought were my friends and by people I did not know. I feel so bad for this girl and a boy told me not to end up like amanda todd and he asked me if id kill myself. I said I dont know but then I said no…..I dont know it just hurts …and I know it does