Lindsay’s Liz and Dick’  not bad enough to be good campy fun

That was Elizabeth Taylor at her raging, ribald best in the movie “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?” Although the Edward Albee dialogue had not been written for Taylor, that line flamboyantly expressed Elizabeth Taylor’s hold on the world’s imagination. Even when Taylor herself flopped, it was with such magnitude she still seemed beyond mere mortals. And of course, she always came back stronger than ever, a deep-cleavaged phoenix forever rising from the ashes. She commanded the gods to do her bidding, and the world stood back, agog.

There’s been much chat about Elizabeth Taylor in the weeks leading up to Sunday’s airing of Lindsay Lohan’s “Liz and Dick” TV movie. Those who feared that Lifetime’s nickel-and-dime version of Taylor would somehow devalue the original, were silly. If anything, Taylor has gone up in public estimation, because Lohan has driven her own image so far into the ground. (No woman in Hollywood is as negatively perceived as Lindsay, with the exception of Halle Berry. The public does not seem to be on Berry’s side, through any of her traumas.)

I keep hearing that “Elizabeth must be turning in her grave.” I doubt it. The casting of Lindsay probably wouldn’t have bothered ET. In fact, she might have felt compassion for the long-troubled Lohan, and even given her a tip or two. Taylor would have loathed the title, “Liz and Dick.” (Neither of the Burtons cared for the diminutive of their given names.) And Elizabeth would have fought anything that put Richard in a bad light. Elizabeth knew who she was, and she knew we knew. (She did battle NBC over a TV movie about her life back in 1982, but it wasn’t about fear of exposure. Elizabeth sued on the grounds that as a working actress, any impersonation would affect her finances negatively. She won. Years later, as her health declined rapidly — no longer working — she didn’t bother fighting an ABC movie. It came and went without harming Taylor’s iconic status.)

Oh, and that reminds me — how was “Liz and Dick”? Some critics said it was not bad enough to be good campy fun. I must disagree. It was hilarious. It is right up there with “The Bad Seed,” “Valley of the Dolls,” “Body of Evidence” and “Showgirls.” I won’t even say Lindsay was “miscast” because I think anybody would be. Not that Lohan didn’t give it her all. She threw tantrums and vases and guzzled from vodka bottles as if she’d been doing it all her life. (Pause to discreetly clear throat.)