What Boys Want: 18 Traits that Make a Girl Instantly Attractive

You know what boys like, you know what boys want – wait, do you really? Last thing I heard was that men are from Mars and women are from Venus.

If girls knew everything about guys – what boys want and their biggest fantasies – well, then that would be the perfect world. Instead, we spend our spare time analyzing them and wondering why they do the things they do. Well, at least I do that.

How to know what boys want

In all honesty, boys aren’t as complicated as we like to think they are. I think that all of our over-analyzing actually made them more complex than in reality. If you didn’t know what boys want, well, you will after reading this.

#1 They want to be desired. At the end of the day, girls and guys are very similar. They both want to be desired by someone. So, if you’re playing hard to get, that’s cool. But at some point, you’ll have to let that go and make them feel wanted.

It’s all about timing. If you show them too much affection too soon, their ego inflates, and well, that’s the last thing they need.

#2 They want to be complimented. Honestly, who doesn’t like compliments? I, for one, love it. But don’t shower them with compliments or else it’ll look fake. But, every once in a while, compliment them on their haircut or shirt – whatever it is that you think looks good. It’ll make them feel good, and it also shows them that you’re paying attention to the details. [Read: 25 real compliments for guys they’ll never ever forget]

#3 They want you to know how to touch them. Boys want you to know how to touch them. That doesn’t mean the first time you guys are making out it’ll go perfectly. The first couple times for me were a disaster, but let’s move on from that.

Eventually, you’ll learn what they like and what turns them on, just as they’ll learn the same things about you. If you’re nervous, just tell him. He’ll help you calm down… oh, yes he will.

#4 They want you to know how to touch yourself. How can he know how to turn you on when you don’t even know how to turn yourself on? They want you to know your body – that’s what boys want.

And, let’s be honest, there will be some moments when you won’t have a guy around – and that’s when you’ll want to know what to do with your fingers. So, take some time to masturbate and get to know your sexual side. [Read: How to give yourself an orgasm – 15 sizzling hot tips]

#5 They want to help you. Have you ever gone to a guy and asked him to open a pickle jar? The joy they get from doing it is actually ridiculous. They get to show you that, yeah, that’s right, I’m a man.

Meanwhile, you’re staring at the pickles and thinking about your sandwich. But never mind, it gives them validity in their manhood. So, sure, you can probably get the salt shaker on the kitchen shelf, but sometimes, it’s okay to ask him to get it for you.

#6 They want you to be open-minded. This doesn’t just mean sexually, this also means in general. Boys want to try new things, go out to new places, and live life. Now, that doesn’t mean girls don’t like those things either.

But, we’re talking about guys here. They want a partner who will check out the new Chinese restaurant down the street, even though she has her favorite place. Or go paintballing with him and his friends. [Read: What men want in a woman to be drawn to her]

#7 They want you to be sexually confident. What boys want is for you to not be shy in bed. I remember hooking up with a guy, and I was always trying to cover myself up. I was nervous and shy of my body, and was unsure of how much of my sexuality I could reveal.

Listen, if you’re with a guy, it’s because they find you attractive, so don’t worry about that. Also, you should never have to restrict yourself from doing things you find sexually arousing. If they like it, they’ll go with it. And if they don’t, well, you can find someone who does. [Read: 12 bad girl traits every guy wants to see in his own girl]

#8 They want to feel appreciated. Guys want to feel appreciated, just like women. If the guy buys you a gift or takes you out for dinner, they want to know that you appreciated that act of kindness. That doesn’t mean you have to give him a blowjob in the bathroom stall, but a simple thank you would suffice.

#9 They want you to have a sense of humor. If you don’t find his sense of humor funny, well, perhaps it’s time to find someone else. They want you to have a sense of humor, and of course, they want you to laugh at their jokes. Laughing together is another level of connection, and there’s nothing worse than being around someone who never laughs. [Read: 12 things guys likes in a girl besides her appearance]

#10 They want to feel supported. You have your goals and dreams, so why wouldn’t he? Boys want to be supported in their goals, so if you’re always making fun of the guy you like because they want to become a race car driver, well, there’s a reason why he’s not with you.

When you’re with someone who pushes you to go for your dreams, you feel good, right? So, the same goes for them. That’s what boys want.

#11 They want you to be able to hang with his guys. Boys want a girlfriend who will be able to hang out with the boys and have a good time. There’s nothing worse than seeing a girl texting in the corner or pouting because she doesn’t want to be there. Just think about it if it was the other way around. Exactly. They want a girl that’ll be cool with their friends.

#12 They want you to be adventurous in bed. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to be tied up and gagged, but it’s always more enjoyable when you’re with someone who’ll be willing to try new things. Boys want a girl who will suggest to try out new things or surprise them naked at their front door. [Read: 13 secret qualities men crave to see in their girl]

#13 They want to feel like they are the man. Men want to feel like men. They want to feel like they’re your man. They don’t want to feel like the booty call or the “maybe” guy. They want to be the guy.

#14 They want you to be a challenge. Now, if you give everything up on the first date, I mean, you can do that. Guys usually like it when they have a challenge. Half of the fun is in the chase, so make them chase you! If they know that you like them, it’s not the end of the world. You can still have fun flirting and teasing them. [Read: Why men like a chase – And how to use this in your favor]

#15 They want for you to be independent. The last thing any boy wants is a girl who doesn’t know how to be on her own. They want someone who has her own life apart from them.

A girl who can pay her own bills, go out with her girlfriends, and spend time on her own. That shows that although she may like the guy, she doesn’t need him. No one likes a stage 5 clinger. [Read: How to attract men in a way they can’t resist]

#16 They want you to get dirty with them. They want a girl who’ll be able to get dirty with them. Talk dirty, send naughty pictures, and tease them with flirty text messages. This just builds the tension and desire until they get to see you.

#17 They want you to not pressure them with major decisions. Guys don’t want to be pressured into making decisions. I know, you’re probably saying, well, what if he doesn’t want to go official with me?

If the guy doesn’t want to be your boyfriend, move on. If a guy doesn’t want to make you his, then he’s not 100% sure of your relationship. And honestly, you can find someone who really wants to be with you, rather than a maybe. [Read: 15 types of girlfriends who make a guy’s life a living hell]

#18 They want you to love yourself. We all have our insecurities, that’s only normal. However, boys love women who are self-confident. Basically, this means, guys like girls who love themselves. Women who are self-confident still have their insecurities, however, they have accepted their imperfections and continue to love themselves. [Read: How to keep a guy interested in 30 super sexy ways]

See? Guys aren’t that hard to figure out, you just need to pay attention. So, if you’re trying to figure out what boys want, here it is.

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Natasha Ivanovic
A serial dater, Natasha Ivanovic knows a thing or two about men and the dating scene. Much of her writing is inspired by her encounters with men - and for good ...