Thursday, April 23, 2009

Ah, bachelor parties. How can one go wrong, really, when playing out these alcohol-drowned, stripper-crazed shenanigans on our television screens? I don't really think you can. And, contrary to popular belief right now, I honestly think the stag night for our charming Dr. Chase is - can you believe? - completely real.

More...First of all, there a ton of promo pics for this episode at house_spoiler on LiveJournal. Looking at them all, it seems as though this party is much too intricate and involved for it to be a figment of House's haunted imagination. He's talking to Wilson, he's pouring shots, he's toasting Chase. Taub, Foreman and Thirteen are there - the latter joins Wilson in doing body shots off strippers. It's all very odd an unlike anything we're used to on House, but I doubt he would hallucinate something this detailed. Much less something that takes this much time. Call me crazy, but I just think that sounds absurd.

This shot is from the episode promo. Foreteen are at a strip club, but no one else is there. It looks nearly empty, save for a few other random people. I'd bet it's during the day. And judging by their facial expressions, I'd bet they aren't there for pleasure. Everyone thinks House must be the best man (which, I agree, is ridiculous) because he's throwing the bachelor party, but I bet Chase has a best mate out there somewhere. House just took it upon himself to put the party together, and here we see Foreman (and his female-loving girlfriend) checking out strippers. Recruiting, if you ask me. And, really, why would they be doing that if there's no real party to recruit for in the first place? They wouldn't. They're picking and choosing which girls to use at Chase's party, because Chase's party isn't actually at a real strip club.

It's at Wilson's apartment. Which I find not only hilarious, but also incredibly Housian. It is so totally like House to break into Wilson's apartment and turn it into a makeshift strip club without asking, while Wilson is blissfully ignorant at work. You can see in the photo here that Wilson looks to have just arrived home (you can see his briefcase and keys in other shots), and he looks less than thrilled at the state of his home. If you can find a logical explanation for me as to why House would hallucinate Wilson coming home and yelling at him for the fake, imaginary bachelor party he's not really throwing, please feel free to tell me what it is. Because I don't see how that makes any sense at all. This party at Wilson's has to be real.

Also, if you're going to hallucinate yourself throwing the most epic bachelor party known to man, wouldn't you also hallucinate that you did a better job with the atmosphere than just Chinese paper lanterns, light sabres, and a blow-up kinky sheep? Seriously. This party is probably epic in it's activities, but it looks pretty cheap when it comes to decorations.

Oh, and you really can install stripper poles into your home without any hassle. A pole in Wilson's living room doesn't mean this party is a hallucination. Not when you can have one put there within minutes and it's just as easily removed when the celebration is complete. Just want to make that clear, because I'm sick of everyone trying to use that as an excuse.

Anyway, there's a moment in the episode where House is (as seen) pouring shots in the morgue. This is making everyone in the fandom assume the party must be a hallucination, because it looks entirely too similar to the other photo of House pouring shots at the party for Chase. I'm still not convinced this means anything. Trust me, it worried me and I spent far too (pathetically) long stressing about it, but I don't think it means hallucination. That almost seems too obvious to be the answer. If you look at the rest of the promo pics in that link at the start of this blog, it almost looks like House is putting on a show of incredible bartender tricks. My bet is that he was practicing those tricks in the morgue. If you pay attention, there are too many differences in the two photos for them to actually mesh as reality/hallucination: House's posture is different, for starters; the alcohol he's pouring is different; the number of shot glasses is different in both photos, etc. Also, it seems pretty obvious that Chase actually drinks the shots - if this were all a hallucination, the fact that Chase isn't actually there to make that alcohol disappear would kind of be the buzzkill of the entire scenario.

Here's another thing: The immigration officers. These fools are ridiculous, you guys. They're not even trying to look legit. They're clearly strippers, obviously hired by House and most likely sent to kidnap Chase and get him to the party. Chase and Cameron (she's there - see the ponytail?) are on their way home from work, walking out casually with Foreman (whom I bet is totally in on the INS/stripper prank), when they get stopped by these crazy fools and told that Chase is being remanded to INS custody - or something like that. I find it telling that Foreman is with them, because either Cameron is in on it, too, or she's going to freak out that they're hauling her fiancé away. Good thing Foreman is right there to let her in on the joke and calm her down, don't you think? I do. I also think it makes no sense for them to be there at all if there's no real party to take Chase to anyway. I think the party is definitely real.

Also, there's Amber. Amber really is a hallucination, and we've been given the impression that she's having a little fun with House - she's helping him enjoy his insomnia, etc, by giving him awesome ideas of how to best spend his time. For instance, throwing Chase this massively awesome bachelor party. You can see in this photo that House is hanging out with Amber... in Wilson's bathtub. He's also wearing the same Hugh Heffner-esque pimp robe that he's wearing in all of the photos of the party - also taking place at Wilson's. I'm willing to bet that this bathtub toast is after (or near the end of) the party, and they're congratulating one another on a brilliant plan excellently executed. The party was a huge hit, and she's oh-so-proud of him for pulling it off while he's oh-so-impressed with her for coming up with the idea to begin with. I can't really think of another logical explanation as to why House is wearing the same outfit he wore at the party, and he's at Wilson's apartment in both instances.

Speaking of people wearing the same outfits, this is a random nit-pick, perhaps, but why exactly would House hallucinate everyone in their actual work clothes at this party? If this were a hallucination, he'd probably see them in their street clothes or at least suits that aren't EXACTLY THE SAME as the ones they actually wore that day to work. Because Wilson, Chase, and Foreman are all in the same clothes we see them wearing in other promo pics - and why would House hallucinate himself wearing a tie? He NEVER wears ties! He's clearly just all dressed up to make a scene, cause a fuss, and fuck with everyone's heads. I'm pretty sure it's going to be beyond awesome.

Really, there are a ton of reasons why I'm convinced this bachelor party is real instead of hallucinated, and only one reason that even halfway makes me think it might not be. I'm ignoring the one reason because it feels like self-induced paranoia to keep myself from getting too far entrenched in the optimism. To me, it's real and that means the immigration issues are real... and that means the wedding is real.

So many set leaks and sources (like the National Enquirer) have already confirmed that Chase & Cameron get married after the INS issues come up, but somehow we're all still doubting it anyway. Self-preservation on the part of the CC 'shippers, I think, and pure denial on the part of everyone else. We'll see who ends up being right on Monday night, but I have a sneaking suspicion that the episode will wrap with the Chase/Cameron wedding happening in a pretty little musical montage.

Even if it doesn't, I'm still expecting it for "Both Sides Now" anyway.

Unless, of course, "House Divided" proves me completely wrong and rips my heart out Monday night. In which case, none of this will matter because I'll be a pathetic ball of disappointment anyway.

But, really? I highly doubt the chances of that happening. And, either way, we should all prepare ourselves for Monday night -- it looks like it's going to be epic, no matter what the reality turns out to be.

3 Responses to “House: Is This in My Head? I Don't Know What to Think.”

First of all I don't know how google got me here (but I'm happy that it did) & I'm not native speaker so maybe my comment will have no sense at all.Second of all: you've made the most insightful predictions that I've read about that episode.I must say that the idea about an hallucinated party & a real one made sense to me, but your theory is too much better, & fits with the promos.I really want that your theories comes true, so I'll keep my fingers crossed.See ya.

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