Starving Syrians delighted to make it on to Buzzfeed

January 17, 2014

DAMASCUS: Thousands of starving Syrians were celebrating last night after they joined dancing household pets and celebrity makeovers on the world’s most popular news site, Buzzfeed.

“I can’t believe we finally made it,” said Iman Al Malki as she waited seven hours for bread. “I mean, we’re right up there with ’7 Reasons Your Cat Is Adorable’, ’15 Sexy TV Aliens’ and ’25 Funniest Jennifer Lawrence Photobombing Memes’. This is the best day ever!”

The article on starving Syrians, number 23 on the Buzzfeed news list at the time of going to press, was yesterday wedged between a three-second repeating GIF video of Reese Witherspoon at the Golden Globes and an article about McDonald’s secret menu items.

“Our starvation right next to the McDonald’s menu! It’s just awesome,” said Talal Kalash as he hunting for scraps in a bombed out building.

Buzzfeed reader and Oklahoma resident, Megan Sullivan, said she was ‘real glad’ to see the Syrians on the news list. “I didn’t click on it or anything but it made me feel like a good person because I read the headline,” she said.

Buzzfeed news editor, Tom Swasozki, said that the Syrian article generated 121 clicks, compared to 32,546,457 for ’19 Dogs Who Would Be Awesome Ninjas’ and 43,569,324 for ’12 Things Only Short People Born In The 80s Would Understand’.