The last two weeks have been interesting. I think with the excitement of the approaching Thanksgiving holiday, I forgot to check in with myself often enough. All of the fun activities just helped mask some underlying things going on and once they were over, the mask was gone. So, the last few days have been rough. Last night on my way home from work, I got so restless and anxious that I felt like I wanted to start walking and not stop. Running even sounded like a good idea.

By the time I got off the bus and walked home, I had talked myself down to about a 45 minute walk. So I changed, grabbed my iPOD, and got out of the house as quickly as I could…for 45 minutes. I don’t even think I was technically in my neighborhood anymore. Adele kept singing and I just kept fleeing. And now I realize, that’s what I was doing, fleeing. Eventually I calmed down, didn’t feel so closed in anymore, and turned toward home. By the time I got home, I felt stronger and more relaxed. Some stretching helped as well.

Perhaps others experience these feelings often, but the whole process was new for me. I don’t think it’s all settled yet, but I do feel more like myself. And ultimately I was reminded of the importance of daily reflection before things get that crazy inside.

I’m currently reflecting as to why I haven’t posted for a while. I’ve been busy, there has been plenty to update on, etc. I think sometimes the pressure of sharing in a public forum gets to me and I just like to reflect on my own for a while. Hopefully more thoughtful posts will begin flowing again soon. For now, a few photos from my favorite Thanksgiving weekend activities. It was a great weekend to spend with friends, skype with family, and SLEEP!

I love the Seattle MVS unit. Each of us is very different from the other, and it works! Heading in to MVS, I was a bit concerned that community living would feel like college living. OK…sometimes it is like that. But more commonly we float between chores and hobbies, group time and alone time, upstairs and downstairs, and those times that we intersect make up the memories I know I’ll keep forever. Not everyone believes in miracles or even God, let alone God’s desire to intervene in our lives, but everytime we’re together and I laugh until I cry, receive or witness their support, or feel connected in any way to this seemingly random group of 8 people, I see God. God didn’t intend for us to live lonely, unconnected lives. My housemates remind me of that promise daily, just by being around.

As I peeled off painter’s tape from our french doors, one housemate sat reading, and two others watched a NOVA special on time. One concept is that people experience the present differently, even if their place and human concept of time are the same (their “now-slice.”) I’m sure everyone in the house is experiencing this time and place differently, and most likely aren’t as emotional about it as I seem to be today, but I will always be grateful for having a chance to share my “now-slice” with them.

Yes, it’s usually more expensive to live in a city. However, there are plenty of free options that you can find to entertain yourself. And sometimes you get lucky and a friend comes to visit that completely spoils you. Such was the case this past week. Thanks Jeremy!

Here are some of our stops, which I would completely recommend to anyone:

I have posted before about work and what my big projects are, but I thought I’d let you know about a NEW project that I get to work on. I’m enjoying it a lot and am happy to have the opportunity to be involved in it.

We recently started partnering with a local middle school and a group of their parents’ efforts to start a backpack program. For those of you who don’t know what a backpack program is, it’s ok, I didn’t know either until I attended the Washington Food Coalition conference. This group of parents has identified students that may not have enough food or access to food over the weekend to keep them healthy. They are most likely dependent on the school lunch program as well for their main meal. So on Fridays I assemble a few boxes with kid friendly, no-prep/limited-prep food and one of the parents comes to the food bank and picks it up. The parents then put the food in drawstring bags and distribute them to the children. The children bring their bags back on Monday and we start all over again!

It feels good to ensure that these children aren’t hungry over the weekend. I’m saddened by the thought that some families just aren’t able to provide time and resources to feed their children, and I have no doubt that it is a terrible feeling for most of the parents too. I’m grateful that I always had enough, more than enough, and often too much. During college and then into my professional career, I learned a lot about the state of the world and our country. It has always been a challenge to feel guilt, acknowledge my contribution to the pain of others, and then figure out how to reduce my destructive print on the Earth and all of its inhabitants. That’s why I recycle, that’s why I became a vegetarian, that’s why I quit a full time job to volunteer, and that’s why I’d rather live with housemates than be in a 2 bedroom house by myself. It’s all in an effort to lead a more Christ-like lifestyle. I fail daily, and I know I’ll never get there…but I feel I’m required to keep trying.

“He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.”