You might be a pro-life, steroid-injecting, devil-worshipping white supremacist who supports the Maple Leafs, believes they’re a superhero and is a self-confessed hit with the ladies.

Just don’t you dare mention any of those facts on your personalized licence plate.

The provincial government
does not allow vanity plates
that contain “obscene,” “derogatory” or “racist” language or that refer to drugs, alcohol, sex, violence, criminal activity, law enforcement, public figures, politics or religion. Bureaucrats who seem abnormally knowledgeable about offensive words have rejected more than 3,300 applications on these grounds between November 2010 and June 2013, a list obtained via freedom of information request reveals.

The Star has created a
searchable database
from this list so readers can see for themselves what plate names have been rejected.

Nearly a third of the 3,315 rejected applications were refused on the criterion of “clarity and readability.” This vague category seemingly included applications from rednecks, figments of the imagination and astronomers with plate requests like HO5ER, A.BATMAN, 2THF4IRY, and ST4RG4ZR.

Predictably the second and third most-censored categories were plates that revolved around themes of religion and sex.

The people who proposed HIREDGUN, JOYRIDEN, FELON and LAWBRKR were spared the attention of local police and RCMP detachments.

And no doubt Toronto’s drug dealers are disappointed their requests for plates like GOTSPEED, B.JUICED, ILOVCOKE and SPD4WEED were rejected.

More than 25,000 of these two- to eight-character personalized licence plates — which cost about $250 each — are issued by the province of Ontario each year.

Although the transportation ministry has so far only rejected 3 per cent of proposed plates in 2013, it has faced occasional criticism in the past from rejectees who believe its criteria are too restrictive or that its employees apply them overzealously. In 2007, United Church Rev. Joanne Sorrill became a political cause célèbre after the ministry refused to renew her “REV JO” plate because it believed “rev” could encourage unsafe driving and because Rev “is an alcoholic cooler-type beverage.”

Premier Dalton McGuinty eventually stepped in to grant Sorrill the plate, calling the ministry’s behaviour “laughable.”

“This is a difficult job being done by sincere people, but it is an imperfect science,” the ministry said in an email, going on to explain that employees use such resources as Wikipedia and UrbanDictionary.com for research purposes. “Balancing the right of personal expression and community standards is no easy task.”

The ministry added an applicant is entitled to a one-time reconsideration regarding the rejected plate name — provided they can justify it.

The ministry formed the eight-member personalized licence plate review committee in August 2008. The panel meets on a weekly basis.

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