Tuesday, November 5, 2013

{Note to readers: I'm participating in a 21 Days of Gratitude Meditation Program, which you can access for free here. }

Ah, purpose. The word that brings up the "why am I here/what am I doing with my life" questions. (Aka, the mantra of your 20s. )

Generally, I've already asked myself these things before I've finished my first cup of coffee. (Now, I may not know much, but I'm pretty sure no one should discover their purpose before the first 80mg of caffeine hits their veins in the morning.)

I've never been that person who's been on the straight and narrow path since childhood. While some people have always known they've wanted to be teachers, doctors, lawyers, stay-at-home moms, etc, I've just been hoping for my parents to reveal the fact that I have a secret trust fund and therefore will never have to work another day in my life.

So the real question is: if I do have to show up to work everyday, what is it exactly that I want to be doing?

In todays meditation, Tim Kelley asks: what is something that you do that seems to make time stop? My answer: reading, writing, cooking. (Reading and writing about cooking also counts.)

I feel lucky that I get to teach reading all day, since it's truly something I'm passionate about. But I also find myself watching the clock during the school day, and saying things like "only one more class to go"! Not exactly Chapter 1 in "The Purpose-Driven Life."

When I was in Teach for America, I was too busy to worry about my purpose. My energy was totally devoted to getting myself out of bed and making it through the day. Now that I'm an alum and back in Charlotte, I have more time to myself and more to enjoy outside of work. And while teaching is fulfilling, it's not something I think I'll be able to do in the long term. (Because seriously? Some days I am just not.in.the.mood.)

In my ideal job, I don't count down the days to Friday. I have flexibility in my day and a good mix of time to myself and interaction with others. I can mix my passions of reading, writing, and vegan food into some sort of money-making venture.