Ripped Guy at Dick’s: Welcome to Dick’s Sporting Goods! Can I help you find something specific? Me: Um……ah…….mumblemumblemumble. RGAD: I’m sorry? What was that? Me: MUMBLEMUMBLE. RGAD: (Nervous laugh) Sorry. Still didn’t get that. Me: I’M LOOKING FOR A JOCK STRAP! (Every eye in the store zeroes in on me.) Me: I mean. I’M not […]

Dear Cayleigh: You leave today. I told myself I wouldn’t cry. I lied to myself. I couldn’t stop the flow. Since you came along almost 10 years ago, I could always pop in the car and see you whenever I wanted. You lived just across the river. It wasn’t far. Now, I wish I’d made […]