Parenting Advice From Another Culture: I'll Just Call My Parents

From Tiger Moms to bringing up bebes, this mom has had it with parenting experts.

I've written before about how the almighty "parenting experts" can basically suck it. I've spent 11 years reading books on how to do this mommy gig, and I'm pretty sure that the only qualifications required to write a parenting advice book are a laptop and a strong desire to sell books.

Now the latest trend in parenting books is those written by parents who come from other cultures. The book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom gave us Amy Chua's advice as a successful Chinese-American mom; in Bringing Up Bébé, American mom Pamela Druckerman gives us the French perspective.

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These books are interesting because I like learning how other people do things. The reason I'm not buying them; however, is because I'm not going to plunk down $16 for someone to tell me I'm doing it wrong, no matter how awesome their accent is.

My parents are British by birth, and I'm sure in some ways their Brit culture had an impact on their parenting style. My sister and I grew up drinking milky tea while our dad discussed the Opinion section of The New York Times with us.

My parents are, above all, practical. A thorough sociological study (consisting of watching Mary Poppins, Nanny McPhee, and Nanny 911 ) tells me that practical parenting is definitely the British style. When my twin daughters were toddlers, I found myself unable to take them out without a stroller because they would run in different directions. Eventually I found some cute backpack harnesses that basically functioned as leashes. The girls loved them, and we could finally go for a walk without worrying they might get squished by a car. While other people may have looked askance at my taking the toddlers out for "walkies," my step-mum was totally supportive.

"Oh, we had those in England growing up," she said. "No one batted an eye. Don't worry, you're doing the right thing because you're making sure your children get fresh air and exercise without getting dead." And when my British step-mum says it, it's kind of like Mary Poppins is saying it, so you're all, "Oh, fabulous, okay then." On the other hand, my dad was sent to boarding school at age nine, and he certainly didn't give us the same stiff-upper-lip upbringing he received.

Maybe it's my somewhat British upbringing, but I tend to lean toward the practical as well. And that means that if I need advice, I'll ring up my parents instead of spending money on a book by someone who's never even met my kids.

Joslyn Gray is the author of the humor blog stark. raving. mad. mommy. She writes about parenting four fabulous, hilarious kids with a quirky mix of autism, ADHD, and anxiety.

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