Writer David Kamp offers a superficial glance at the man behind the song and dance, reducing Harris to an outdated, wooden stereotype. Kamp goes so far as to discuss what kind of a closet-case celebrity Harris would’ve been, had he been famous in the 1950s. (For the record, Harris would have taken as a beard someone like Doris Day or Cyd Charisse, whom he refers to as “sort of the feminine-masculine.”)

The one bit of insight in the article comes when Harris discusses how he will physically prepare for his upcoming Broadway role in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. He told Kamp, “As Barney (on How I Met Your Mother) I’m all shoulders and arms and chest, but as Hedwig, I’ll be all legs and butt and back. Like Cyd Charisse.” Barney got back, now that’s something worth writing about.

Short of that, Kamp spends a lot of time talking about what Harris eats (or doesn’t eat, because all gay men have food issues, you know). Oh, and he refers to Hedwig’s style as “botched-tranny drag.” Apparently he missed the memo that serious journalists shouldn’t say “tranny” in print.