Archive for February, 2011

“The Cloud Minders”
Written by Margaret Armen
Story by David Gerrold and Oliver Crawford
Directed by Jud Taylor

Season 3, Episode 21
Production episode: 3×19
Original air date: February 28, 1969
Star date: 5818.4

Mission summary

To combat a devastating botanical plague that threatens the non-botanical life on Merak II, Enterprise heads to Ardana, a Federation world that possesses unobtainium zenite, the only thing in the universe that can save the trees. Upon arrival, they’re invited to the cloud city Stratos for an audience with the High Advisor Plasus, but they’re in too much of a hurry for pomp and circumstance. Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock beam down directly to the zenite mine entrance to pick up the prescription they ordered from drugstore.com and get on their way. However, they do spare some time to gaze admiringly at the city floating above and discuss its utter devotion to art and purely intellectual pursuits.

“The Way to Eden”
Story by Michael Richards and Arthur Heinemann
Teleplay by Arthur Heinemann
Directed by David Alexander

Season 3, Episode 20
Production episode: 3×20
Original air date: February 21, 1969
Star date: 5832.3

Mission summary

The Enterprise is chasing a small re-used Tholian dart cruiser that’s heading for Romulan space. Despite repeated hails the cruiser will not turn back, and so Kirk engages a tractor beam to tow them to safety. They seem to really want to get to Romulan territory (must be the ale) because they struggle against the tractor beam. Soon their engines begin to overheat (we know this because it turns red, like an electric stovetop) and when it becomes obvious they’re going to explode, Kirk orders Scotty to beam aboard the crew of six to the Enterprise. He will regret this is fairly short order, as will we all.

In the transporter bay six space hippies, covered in floral body paint and flowing robes, materialize before us. They sit down on the transporter pads and refuse to move when Scotty tries to take them to the briefing room. Instead, they shriek like new age banshees, “No go! No go! No go!” Let’s just hope Nurse Chapel doesn’t have to play babysitter again.

Season 3, Episode 19
Production episode: 3×21
Original air date: February 14, 1969
Star date: 5843.7

Mission summary

Kirk, Spock, and McCoy beam down to planet Holberg 917G in search of pure ryetalyn, the only known cure for a deadly outbreak of Rigelian fever on Enterprise. If they can’t secure this maguffin and process it in four hours, McCoy says “the epidemic will be irreversible.” They certainly don’t have time to investigate the life form that Spock’s tricorder registers on the supposedly uninhabited planet, nor is it a convenient moment for a floating robot to wobble over and fire a blue laser beam in their general vicinity. But these things happen, so what are you going to do?

Last July, Eugene and I were mourning the end of Season 2 and trying to come up with a way to survive the third season. We also wanted some kind of gift for our readers and other TOS fans, many of whom have had to choke down Season 3 for over forty years. We tossed around a bunch of ideas, but we kept coming back to one: why not just make fun of the damn things?

“Spock’s Brain” seemed an obvious target and we got to work. Turns out these things are hard. In addition to the technical challenges of recording that kind of precise podcast, there’s always the realization that you’re not as funny as you think you are. The real tragedy was that we had to watch “Spock’s Brain” countless times. (Literally. We lost count.)

This took a lot of time and mental energy over the course of the last six months. We hope it was worth it! We are very proud to present to you our first Laugh Trek: “Spock’s Brain.”

Season 3, Episode 18
Production episode: 3×18
Original air date: January 31, 1969
Star date: 5725.3

Mission summary

The Enterprise has some newly designed hardware for Memory Alpha, the central repository for all Federation knowledge both cultural and scientific. To help with the installation is Lieutenant Mira Romaine, a beautiful young specialist that Scotty has taken quite a liking to. This concerns Kirk:

KIRK: When a man of Scotty’s years falls in love, the loneliness of his life is suddenly revealed to him. His whole heart once throbbed only to the ship’s engines. He could talk only to the ship. Now he can see nothing but the woman.

Good thing he’s archiving that thought in a log for the bureaucrats back home!

But before they can give him any dating advice, a series of strobe lights flashes across the viewscreen. It seems at first to be some kind of storm, but the speed and precision with which it moves betrays a kind of intelligence. It closes in on the Enterprise and engulfs the bridge and her crew in sparkly lights.