Check out this “Shit Android Fanatics Say” video. Could this guy be any more grating? Get it out of your system in the comments below. You’ll feel so much better.Hat tip to Android and Me, our sister site, for spotting this video by Mobile Phone Finder in Australia.It appears to be a response to September’s “Shit Apple Fanatics Say, Part 1” from the same outfit:

The 4th-generation iPad comes just seven months after the launch of the previous model, a move that seems very un-Apple like.

Apple’s release of another new iPad this year has many scratching their heads. But Morgan Stanley’s Katy Huberty sees method behind the madness.

In an investors note out yesterday, Huberty ticked off three reasons why the company unveiled the iPad 4 so soon after its predecessor, which arrived earlier this year.

First, the 3rd-generation iPad, which the analyst calls a “stale product,” could have seen its sales cannibalized by the cheaper iPad Mini.

Second, sales for the 3rd-gen iPad were not as high as expected, which Huberty blamed on limited improvements over the iPad 2. Adding the A6 chip to the iPad 4 doubles the new tablet’s performance, which at least “partially addresses that issue.”

And finally, Apple may have relied on experience in pushing out a new iPad. The company refreshed the original iPod when it released smaller versions, which the analyst says “accelerated growth.”

Beyond Huberty’s reasons, Apple likely had other incentives in mind.

The 4th-generation iPad comes with the same Lightning interface found on the new iPhone, iPod Touch, and iPod Nano. As CNET’s Molly Wood lamented yesterday, this means that buyers of any of these new devices have tocough up the cash for all new accessories. Apple and its partners stand to gain hefty profits from all the new devices and adapters that people will be forced to purchase.

But I think the iPad refresh is also a matter of timing.

In the past, Apple’s product launches were spread out across the year. A new iPhone would pop up during the summer. A new iPad would appear in March. The company now seems more intent on releasing its new products, especially its mobile products, all around the same time.

So, each new iPhone debuts in September. Each new iPad Mini will debut in October. And now, each new 9.7-inch iPad will also likely debut in October. This timing puts all the products under the same seasonal umbrella. And more importantly, it ensures that Apple has a host of new devices ready in time for the critical holiday demand.

Mondo Media brings back Steve Jobs as a hologram rapper in Steve Jobs: Back of the Line, a parody rap song and animated music video where he introduces the iPad Mini. Last time we saw this hologram version of Steve Jobs he wasintroducing the iPhone 5. Back of the Line was written by Andy Ochiltree and Aaron Simpson and features music produced by dance pop artist Markaholic.

If the 15-inch MacBook Pro with Retina display was feeling lonely up there on its high-resolution pedestal, it needn’t any longer. As expected, Apple just announced a 13-inch version to keep it company. The 2,560 x 1,600 resolution means that 13-inch screen offers a ppi of 232, marginally more than its larger brother’s 226. As well as that lovely new display, there’s a pair of Thunderbolt ports, and a full-size HDMI port to let you make good use of it with, as well as a pair of USB 3s. While this might not be the primary focus of the day, it will definitely be one of the more hotly anticipated reveals from the company’s San Jose event this afternoon. The base model will run you $1,699 and comes with a 2.5GHz i5 processor, 8GB of RAM and 128GB of flash memory. At the top end you can expect 768GB hard drive, atop a Core i7. And, like last time, to top it all off, all the new goodies come in a slimmer, desire-stoking design — weighing a whole pound less than the 2011 13-incher and at just 0.75-inches thick, 20 percent thinner. Already full of want? Then don’t hang around, as it ships today!

Well, hello there, the worst-kept secret in tech. Apple’s iPad mini is the company’s newest device, a 7.9-inch tablet that’s designed to go toe-to-toe with Google’s Nexus 7. For now, it’ll sit alongside the iPad 2and fourth-generation iPad, and as it packs the same 1,024 x 768 display as the second-generation slate, apps will carry across without any resizing. While Phil Schiller didn’t mention Google or the Nexus 7 by name, the rival slate (and Google’s app library) was compared to the newest iOS device. On stage, he claimed that the screen, which is .9-inch larger than the Nexus 7, gives the iPad mini 35 percent more display area than Google and ASUS’ collaboration.

On the hardware size, the 7.2mm thick, .68 pounds device has been manufactured with an “all new” process that gives it the same anodized edges as you’ll find on the iPhone 5. If you were hoping for equal specifications to the big-daddy iPad, you may be mildly disappointed. While it will pack a 5-megapixel camera and an LTE modem (if you opt to buy a cellular model), it’s running the last-generation A5 CPU. However, the slower internals and less potent display may account for how the company has been able to squeeze out a claimed 10 hours of use despite the constrained space for a battery. Pre-orders for the $329, 16GB WiFi-only model begin on Friday (October 26th) and will begin shipping on November 2nd. The cellular-equipped models will begin shipping a few weeks afterward on AT&T, Verizon and Sprint, with the 16GB base model costing $459, running all the way to $659 for the 64GB unit.

Who said Apple’s event was all about the little things? Apple just unveiled its first redesign to its iMacdesktop in three years. The new all-in-one makes the widely expected leap to Intel’s Ivy Bridge Core i5 and Core i7 processors, but also represents a much leaner and meaner replacement for the 2009-era template — its edges are just 5mm thick, and it’s constructed with “friction stir welding” as well as a gapless, less reflective display that’s laminated together with the glass. Screen sizes remain the same and include both a 21.5-inch, 1080p model and a 27-inch, 2,560 x 1,400 model — sorry, no Retina displays this year. They share 720p-capable front cameras with dual mics as well as NVIDIA’s GeForce 600-era graphics, up to 32GB of RAM and a panoply of storage options that peak at 3TB of spinning storage, a 768GB SSD or what Apple calls a Fusion Drive that mixes both 128GB of flash with 1TB or 3TB of conventional storage (a hybrid drive, for those of us who’ve seen it before). There’s no optical drive unless you plug in a USB option.

The 21.5-inch model ships in November, and will set you back $1,299 for a 2.7GHz Core i5, 8GB of RAM and a 1TB hard drive; pony up for the 27-inch model at $1,799 and you’ll get a 2.9GHz Core i5 as well as the same memory and storage. Apple’s larger iMac doesn’t ship until December, however, which will give some impulse buyers at least a brief respite.

Samsung told The Korea Times on Monday that it will end its LCD panel supply relationship with Apple as of next year. That’s according to a “senior Samsung source” who declined to be identified, citing insufficient margins owing to Apple’s supply pricing strategy. Samsung’s role in Apple’s LCD supply chain has dwindled, with the Korean company reportedly cut out of iPad mini production, but Samsung’s decision to pull the plug may have been a pre-emptive strike by the parts manufacturer owing to a declining relationship between the two.

Samsung is said to be fielding more orders from its consumer electronics division, as well as from Apple competitor Amazon, in volumes that could make up for the loss of Apple as an LCD component customer. Apple was Samsung’s top customer according to NPD DisplaySearch for the first half of the year, but Apple began cutting its LCD orders back in September and was reportedly shifting order volumes to LG and Sharp, as ongoing patent disputes worsened.

Pricing on Apple’s latest iPad display had caused Samsung to earn only half as much per pixel on its production compared to previous models, so narrowing margins clearly had an impact on the decision, but this also can’t help but look like a case of Samsung ending a relationship that was already on the rocks to begin with. Apple was already clearly trying to reduce its reliance on its rival’s component supplier arm, as indicated by changes to the way it designs its processor andsources RAM and NAND flash chips, but this may accelerate Apple’s intended timeline.

Apple is a massive customer of LCD panels, and is set to become an even more demanding customer with the impending probable launch of the iPad mini. Earlier, there were concerns about whether or not Samsung’s display supplier competition could produce adequate volumes to satisfy its needs, butSharp seems to have recently gotten its act together, and others like Sony have reportedly joined Apple’s stable of potential supply sources.

The question will be whether or not the timeline Samsung gave of next year will give Apple enough time to stabilize its alternate source. Still, it looks like both have been preparing for this moment for a while, so we could see each walk away relatively unscathed.

We have compiled a list of what we think are the most far-fetched, ridiculous patents Apple has filed in its short history. Of course, we couldn’t ignore its rounded edges and rounded square icons patents.

Patent No.: D478,999 S

Patent Date: August 26, 2003

Apple has claimed a design patent for its glass staircase, which appears at a number of its stores from New York to Paris. This one struck as odd because it doesn’t relate to any of Apple’s innovative products – just its shiny retail locations.

Patent No.: D662,939 S

Patent Date: July 3, 2012

Yes, Apple patented the design of its in-store iPad stands — those plastic, seemingly uncomplicated things Apple tablets sit on at most stores.

Apple also patents the designs of its packaging — in this case, the original iPhone’s box is seen in its different divisions. Patenting the actual products isn’t enough for Apple apparently.

Patent No.: D604,305 S

Patent Date: Nov. 17, 2009

The so-called rounded square icons patent is one of the patents Apple sued Samsung over in their infamous legal battle. Apple claimed Samsung created an interface using icons that were too similarly shaped to its own.

The rounded corners design for the device itself is another patent Apple used to defeat Samsung in their massive intellectual property battle in August. Apple claims it has the exclusive right to use these rounded corners and home buttons.

Apple has patented this strange glove, which Patently has dubbed as the “magic” glove system. The glove is supposed to allow you to use your cell phone in cold weather. As the patent explains it, the glove has two layers — a liner and a shell — and the shell can be “peeled” back to expose the liner and operate the phone.

The changes may help Apple sell some more iPhones, but they won’t fix the biggest problem Apple faces in India and other emerging markets: Its phones are just too expensive for many potential customers.

Apple’s market share in India right now is a startlingly low 1.2%, IDC says–and even that figure that has dropped by half in a year.

Samsung’s market share, meanwhile, has soared to a whopping 51%, double a year ago.

Part of Apple’s problem in India is distribution. According to the WSJ’s Thoppil, Apple doesn’t have retail stores in India because local regulations make this too much of a headache, and Apple’s resellers don’t have a big presence in the country. To supplement this distribution, Apple will begin selling iPhones through a local subsidiary of the vast electronics distributor Ingram Micro.

Apple’s bigger problem, however, is price.

The iPhone is sold mostly through India’s cellular carriers, but unlike carriers in many other countries, these carriers don’t subsidize handset costs. As a result, the iPhone is astronomically expensive.

The iPhone 5, for example, is expected to be priced from 45,000-50,000 rupees, which is $850+. The “entry-level” iPhone, the iPhone 4, sells for 26,500 rupees (~$500).

India is a massive market, with 220 million handsets sold per year. But, as in other big developing markets, price is extremely important. Most of the phones sold in India cost less than $100, and according to an analyst cited by Thoppil, the high-end market is very small.

Selling iPhones through Ingram Micro could force Apple to give up more margin on the phones than it otherwise might.

But the larger issue here is that the smartphone market in the developed world is maturing, and the next few billion smartphone customers (in emerging markets) are likely to be much more price sensitive than the first billion.

If Apple wants to maintain its global market share, therefore, it may be forced to introduce lower-priced phones or sell its existing phones more cheaply. Apple could certainly afford to do this–it makes an extraordinary profit margin on each phone–but cutting prices would obviously eat into its overall profit margin.

The situation in India also reveals how dependent Apple is on carrier subsidies. As carriers try to increase their own profits, they’re trying to find ways to reduce the cost of these subsidies–by charging higher upgrade fees, for example, or reducing the frequency with which customers can upgrade. For now, the subsidy model appears to be holding steady, but if it were ever to start to disappear, the iPhone’s pricing could become a major issue for Apple.

Again, what’s at stake here is not Apple’s survival. The company is in robust financial health. What’s at stake is future growth, market share, and profit margin.

Here’s a brief note intended for the fanboys who ruin technology for everyone else: Look, your war doesn’t make any sense, ok? This whole fanboys vs fandroids thing, the iPhone vs Galaxy, the iPad vs Kindle Fire… who the hell cares? They’re just machines.

And companies are not your friends. They are not here to make you happy. They won’t laugh with you at dinner. They won’t kiss you goodnight. They are just big corporations who want your money.

Corporations waging war upon each other and using you as peons to gain market domination.

Corporations who use underpaid worker drones living inside city-size factories far away to produce toys for you to buy, new shiny pieces of plastic and metal marginally better than the old plastic and metal crap.

And not only you are zombie brand worshipers buying into this whole vain spec race, but you’re also insulting and belittling everyone who doesn’t agree with your choice of phone or tablet or computer. Doing it safely behind a screen because, if you did that right on the face of someone, he or she would punch your face.

So, can you stop “defending” your choice of gadgetry like a insecure whiny cheerleader? Or a crazy religious fanatic? Don’t you see how ridiculous you look to normal people who don’t give a damn? How absurd your concerns are compared to, I don’t know, real life?

Or, if you have to justify your choice, could you at least please just think twice before insulting one another?

Because you just look bad when you do that. A tool. Just pick whatever you like best and stop trying to convince everyone that you made the right decision and that they are wrong. They are not. Nobody is. No more than you, anyway.

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