The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything Movie Soundtrack by
Veggietales

Reviewed by Heather West

"...[introduces]
people from all walks of life to all types of music. And as always,
there is plenty of silliness to go around."

Just when we thought
we'd seen the last of pirate-themed movies, Big Idea Productions returns
with a swashbuckling, feature-length VeggieTales
film starring everyone's favorite singing vegetables. In preparation for
the film's January release, the companion soundtrack dropped early, featuring
artists as diverse as Newsboys and Mandisa as well as the song that started
it all, "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything."

From the first flourish of "Spanish Gold" to
the final, gospel-tinged reprise, the orchestral score is ambitiously grand.
It has to be ambitious;
transforming one of the most infamous criminal factions in history and the
world's least favorite food group into lovable heroes with spiritual clout
isn't the easiest thing to do. Ultimately, there are only two possible trajectories
for The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything-hilarious or ridiculous. Though you
won't know the final verdict on the veggies unless you watch the movie, you
can hope for a glimpse of greatness in the music.

The soundtrack consists of three
types of songs. The first of these are the compositions by Kurt Heinecke,
which serve as bookends to the "sillier
songs" in between. In fact, almost half of the tracks are completely
orchestral, with titles that are just enough to get us interested without
giving too much away - "Walking Rocks" "Donkey-Shaped Help" and "The
Cave Medley." Most are dominated by rousing trumpet sequences, pounding
drums, and contrasting moments of soaring strings. Sound like anything you've
heard recently? Lest we forget which Pirates movie we're listening to, veggie
buccaneers Elliot (Larry the Cucumber), George (Pa Grape) and Sedgewick (Mr.
Lunt) frequently interject with film dialogue.

Next in line are the classic VeggieTales
tunes, lead by "The Pirates
Who Don't Do Anything." Though none really come close to matching it
in terms of sheer laughing-fit inducing humor, there are some notable standouts. "Jolly
Joes" is kind of a G-rated "Yo Ho (Pirates Life for Me)," with
lyrics like "Grab your root beer, hold it high." Kids will undoubtedly
enjoy this song, hopefully without doing everything it suggests! "Whack
your shipmate in the eye/Yank his hair and break his nose/Ain't no place
like Jolly Joe's!"

The original title track is paralleled
by Relient K's 2002 cover, which is part of the remaining group - songs
that are not sung by vegetables. Relient
K's now-classic version brings some great dynamics to the song, by emphasizing
or slowing down certain parts, without sacrificing the essential silliness.
In the same vein, Christian rock group Newsboys offers a new track "Yo
Ho Hero," written by Steve Taylor. The song is hilarious in it's own
right, hilarity being the standard of success here, and retains that Newsboys
feel, despite the fact that they are using the same "aaargh matey" voices
Relient K did. Unlike "The Pirates," however, "Yo Ho Hero" contains
some spiritual content for attentive kids to discover, or parents to point
out: "But if you're feeling a little seasick/Rise and shine/If you want
to get off the guilt-trip/Now's the time/Because of the Captain of the main
ship...He could be comin' before you know/And what are you gonna show?"

TobyMac and Anointed also have
a hand in the project, the latter reprises a song from the Jonah VeggieTales
movie as a bonus track. Most surprising
of all is an appearance from American Idol contestant Mandisa, whose song "The
Right Thing" is upbeat and catchy, even if parts of it are slightly
clichéd. Yet her talents add a distinct flavor to the album, as do
those of the other artists. People who initially buy for Mandisa's track
just might see their horizons broaden a little. The same goes for fans of
TobyMac, Anointed, Relient K, and Newsboys, emphasizing the point of a compilation
album - introducing people from all walks of life to all types of music.
And as always, there is plenty of silliness to go around.

Heather West is a sophomore English and Communications major, who firmly believes
in the concept of the Renaissance man (or woman, in her case). In that vein,
her interests include everything from piano, Broadway, and gospel choir to snowboarding,
missionary work, and filmmaking. Her writing is inspired by her reading; her
favorite authors are Brian Jacques, Bill Myers, Timothy Zahn, G.K. Chesterton,
J.R.R. Tolkien, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Kenneth Grahame, Chaim Potok, Isaac Asimov,
and Lloyd Alexander. While she aspires to be a novelist and screenwriter, Heather
equally enjoys journalism, particularly in the areas of film and music. Her dream
job is creating clean, thought-provoking media that will point people back to
God. She has written for Infuze Magazine, more recently for SoulAudio.com, and
is thrilled to start writing for TitleTrakk!