Rivers attended Gordon-Bibb Elementary School in Decatur, Ala., and as you can see from the photos below, he was still years away from perfecting the various facial contortions that have made him the NFL's most photoshoppable quarterback. Click to enlarge.

Third grade:

Fourth grade:

Fifth grade:

Also: In fourth grade, Rivers and his classmates drew adorable little panels depicting what they'd like to be when they grow up.

Even at that tender age, Rivers knew — he wanted to play football for the C. Bears on their dangerously lopsided field.