Digital News Report – Tiger Woods said he was sorry three times in Friday’s address but failed to tell anyone exactly what he was sorry for. Apparently all of the dozen or so women were telling the truth. Public opinion varies, but Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger says it was a ploy to keep his sponsors.

“I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible and selfish behavior I engaged in,” the golfer told reporters. Tiger also said he was “foolish” and “embarrassed”. He said he never hit Elin and she never hit him. “There has never been an episode of domestic violence in our marriage, ever.”

“I have yet to hear or see Tiger Woods’ statement. I feel extremely lucky,” said curtiskitchen on Twitter. Another tweeter said “Ah, Tiger Woods. Proof that as long as you’re rich, famous and apologetic you can get away with shagging anything with a pulse.”

Other Tweeters can’t wait for the Olympics to end so they can see the skit on Saturday Night Live. “To come out of this scandal and still be named valedictorian is an amazing accomplishment for Tiger,” said Saturday Night Live’s Seth Meyers on the broadcast appology.

“According to sports radio, we all have demons, money talks, and golf needs Tiger Woods. Always going against the grain, that sports radio,” said Neal Pollack on Twitter.

Tiger will likely play golf again sometime after more treatment. “I do plan to return to golf one day,” Tiger said. “I just don’t when that day will be. I don’t rule out it will be this year.”