Q: My husband and I fight incessantly, and the fights are getting slightly violent. For example, when I can’t take it anymore, I throw clothes at him, and he punched through a wall the other day. This is not like us; we aren’t violent people, but we have financially hit rock bottom and can’t even afford counseling. The fighting is affecting our two-year-old, and I’m at a loss of what to do. We don’t want to throw away four years of marriage, and we also both have a lot of baggage from our childhood. What do we do?

-Genna L.

A: Hi Genna,

I’m so sorry to read about the fighting between you and your husband. I’m even more alarmed to read that the fights are now "getting slightly violent." My first thought after reading your email was a statement that was uttered often on an old TV show called Lost in Space that ran from 1965 to 1968. At the first sign of any type of trouble, Robby the Robot would flail his arms in the air, spin around and shout "Danger, Will Robinson!" With that said, I say… Danger, Genna L.! I’m so glad you sent me this email because you need to take action immediately before slightly violent becomes something much worse.

Since money is an issue, I strongly suggest you immediately call your local clergy person, make an appointment to talk this out and get some direction. Your local place of worship is always in touch with professionals who can help regardless of your economic situation. Also, as a point of interest, money is the #1 reason couples fight and divorce in this country, so you have a lot of company, Genna. The good news for you and your two-year-old is that married people work through these issues every day, so again, I strongly suggest you get some guidance by making that call today. As I always say in this type of situation, two things can happen. You and your husband can grow closer as a result of this, or you will grow farther apart. Getting some help now will increase the odds of you and your husband working this out, Genna, so make that call for the sake of your family, and do it NOW!