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Friday, July 27, 2012

When Things Don't Go As Planned

What do you do when things don't go as planned?

I don't mean an activity or craft.

I am talking about life.

How do you adapt?

How do you move forward?

Do you change your plan?

Do you start fresh?

I have been having trouble with this recently. After being scared about going back to work full time. I actually started to feel excited about it. I miss teaching. I was good at it and I know that I would be even better at it now. It's who I am and what I am meant to do. Unfortunately, I didn't find a job. So now, I am faced not only with disappointment but with fear.

Finding a job after so many years at home with my girls isn't going to be easy. Rejection is hard, but not knowing what will become of me is harder. I have always been a planner, mapping out my next step before ever making a move. I like to know what I am doing, when I am doing it and how I am going to do it. This is hard for me - not knowing.

My mother recently reminded me that we can't control everything in our lives. She said things happen the way they are meant to, though not always the way we want them to.

So, where does that leave me?

What is my Plan B?

Where do I go from here?

I honestly don't have any answers at this point. I know that I have to work but it saddens me that I might have to let go of what I love doing (teaching) to do something else (whatever I can find). I can't help but feel a bit inadequate. Why didn't they want to hire me? Why wasn't I good enough?

Sigh.

This is what I need to work on.

NOW.

I need to adapt.

I need to find a Plan B,

but I need to find one that makes me happy.

While I figure things out, I am feeling grateful that I have this blog,

this outlet,

this way to share what we do.

I am grateful that no matter what happens,

I am still a teacher - if only to my own girls.

Wherever the future may lead me,

this is the most important & rewarding "job" I will ever have.

Now, I just have to figure out Plan B.......

How do you handle life when things don't go as planned (or as you hoped)?

15 comments:

You can look at this as an opportunity to "teach" somewhere other than a school. Like you, I "retired" from teaching after my daughter was born 8 years ago. But after 4 years, I was ready for part-time work. I found it at our local recreation center. I am an elementary school teacher, but now I find myself teaching art, cooking, and gymnastics to kids 2-12 y.o. That is how I found your site; looking for ideas for my art classes. Your blogs are invaluable to me. Please know that you are a fantastic teacher, not just to your kids, but to other teachers and parents. So maybe that's your Plan B? Now to just find someone to pay you for it...

thank you for sharing your experience. Hearing stories like yours gives me hope, that something is out there for me. I am so glad that my blog has been helpful to you, that means a lot to me. It still amazes me that what started with only my close friends and family reading, is being read by so many people :) That in itself is a gift that I am overjoyed at being able to experience. I will continue on my search and in the meantime, I will continue to share with all of you. One invaluable lesson this blog has taught me is that being a teacher isn't solely defined by being within the 4 walls of a classroom! :)

I wonder if a better opportunity is waiting for you- it just might not be the time right now. I will be sure to pray for you and your family. I taught for ten years and actually went back to waitressing part time to raise my family. Now I'm home with them during the week and waitress on the weekends. For now it works- I'm going to go back to school part-time this fall as well. We'll see how it goes!

Thank you Jen! It is really all about timing isn't it? It's funny because at first I didn't feel ready but the more I looked, interviewed, etc - the readier I felt. Oh well, it just wasn't meant to be for now. I hope to be able to find something that will still allow me my time with the girls. That is most important to me. Good luck going back to school. I wish you great success and think it's wonderful that you are doing that for yourself. One of my secret desires to go back to school to and get a reading specialization - that would be my ideal teaching position. Maybe someday......

Phylllis, so many cuts in education - sigh! It's a hard time to try and get back into the profession. I was speaking to my mother just the other day about my concerns and feelings and she wisely said to me - "HE has it all planned out for you. You just have to have faith and trust in his plan.: That is the hardest part isn't it? I am working on it. :)

Going through something similar myself. It is disheartening to hear the "thank you, but", even worse to have no response at all (are you listening, companies?!?). I have no advice other than we both need to keep the faith that we didn't get those jobs for a reason, and when the time is right, something wonderful will come along. In the meantime, as mom to a child who needed an afterschool tutor, have you thought about listing yourself with the school dept and/or advertising locally? A number of friends unable to find teaching positions have also been substitute teachers locally, as many end up being hired when positions open. Whichever path you choose, I wish you all the best!

Thank you WorkingMom! I used to tutor after school before I had my own. I have also been substitute teaching as our schedules allow the whole time that I have been a SAHM. I can continue and would have more time to do it now that both girls will be in school full time but there is the problem that it's not guaranteed/steady work which is what we need right now financially. So much to think about and assess. I am trying to be positive - that's been hard for me the past few weeks but just sitting and writing this post and getting everyone's comments, positive energy and well wishes has been so cathartic :)

I plead with you to always put your own family first. I know teaching would have been a steady full-time job, but maybe that's what your family DOESN'T need right now. They need YOU and if a mom truly wants to enjoy her kids and be an involved part of their life, then you have to BE THERE for them when they need you. Teaching full-time these days will not let you do that!! I know. I'm a full-time teacher but my kids are grown. I'm SO thankful that I didn't return to full-time teaching for 20 years, and had a chance to be there for my kids!! No regrets! I wouldn't take a million dollars for those years. I, too, sub-taught, and worked part-time doing things during some of those years. Try to enjoy your kids!! Jobs will always be there, but your kids won't!!!

I wholeheartedly agree with you and that is why I have been home with my girls for the past 5 years. It was something I felt strongly about and thankfully my husband agreed with me and has worked hard so that I could be here for our girls. Ideally, I would love to be able to remain home for them - volunteering in their classes/school, etc. Financially, things are getting harder but I am going to have hope that things will work out as they should and as is best for my family. I have no regrets with having put my career on hold to raise my girls. This has been a blessing that I am grateful to have had. They grow way too fast, as it is I can't believe my baby is starting kindergarten. It is surreal. Thank you for taking the time to share your experience with me as a mom who has gone through this, it means a lot. :)

Ah... isn't this what we all ask ourselves time and time again, "what now?" I do, often. I have been teaching for so long, I almost forget what life is without teaching. Yeah, I home schooled most of my own children, but also as a stand alone high school teacher. Not a tutor, but a full blown teacher. If you are certified, or accredited then you can "hold" your own classes for high school credit. Many home-schoolers are actively searching for such classes. I mostly taught high school Spanish,but I did teach creative writing as well as arts and crafts. Parents are willing to pay for quality education to fill in the gaps. I first ventured into this through local co-ops, but soon I was teaching outside these groups. I had to have a good understanding of the home school laws in my state, but that was easy enough to do. If you want to teach, you will find a way to do what you love. Don't give up on it. From your blog I can tell it is in your blood, and in your future.

Oh, Bern, I'm so sorry the job didn't work out but I just know there are wonderful things in store for you. I'm like you, a planner to my very core, and I know it is so hard not knowing what's next. Your talents come through in your writing and there is something out there just waiting for you, I am sure of it!

Hi, I visited your blog from a tweet I received and was wondering if you looked into the online schools. I am not a teacher and this is the first year that we are trying the online schools (k12 program) but I have friends that are using the schools and love it. I know that would not be the same as in a classroom but it may be something to look into as you would still be at home with your children. You may have already looked into this I just wanted to share & I pray you find what it is you are supposed to be doing now!