Thursday, 13 December 2007

I got my FLEs for Mad About Mirabelle today. What is a FLE? Good question. I am never 100 % sure what FLE stands for. It could be Front Line Edits or Final Line Edits or Formalized Liquor Etiquette or something similar – maybe Feed Leslie Eggs. Anyway, basically just before your book hits the shelves or cyber space a FLE person goes through your book with a fine tooth comb and questions stuff you may have in there. I am lucky as I have a bloody good editor and before it gets to FLE stage, she has already gone through the book and put comments like “What the hell are you thinking?” or “Speak in American” or “The hero would have to three hands and a toothpick between in his teeth and a chisel between his toes to do that manoeuvre” or the ever popular “Fix.” So writing the book is only just a very small part of the whole deal. I would not be an Editor or FLE person (I am sure they have a specific name) for quids. Too hard. I am way too half arsed in my approach to things.

I thought I would share some of the recent words the FLE person pulled me up on. I am an Aussie. I tend to write as I speak. It can be quite colourful but I am slowly learning to tone it down for the books as requested. My Editor is also an Aussie and the odd Aussie word will slip past her as it’s completely normal for us to speak Aussie. I also have a habit of making words up. Every book I write I try to slip in some of my more favourite made up words just to see how alert the FLE person. Anyway, below are the words or phrases that apparently non-Aussie’s wouldn’t understand.

penially challenged- so named in 2004 after Pee Wee, a manager who slept with various office staff, until one of them made a very, very public announcement about the size of his tackle(penis). It was one of the few days we really enjoyed ourselves at work.

pukeable– I love this word. It says it all. I am waiting for the Webster’s people to put it in the dictionary …you know, something like ‘pukeable – see Amarinda Jones’…okay maybe not like that but you know what I mean.

Chance would be a fine thing – This is a pommy (English) saying. It’s from when I lived and worked in Blighty(England) for a couple of years. It means if I could be so lucky.

Does a chicken have lips? One of my favourites - translation - that’s a ridiculous question to ask.

mod cons – I thought this was obvious but apparently not. Its modern conveniences – that which the Jones girl refuses to live without.

carry on a treat – I could have said carry on like a pork chop or have a spak attack or throw a wobbly but I restrained myself. It means to get upset.

she lobbed in – she arrived, she appeared. I lob, she lobs, they lob, we all lob.

shag on a rock – no, not what you think. It means to be left waiting for someone to arrive.

Spruik– talk, speak, annunciate

turn up for the books – how unusual

having her on – kidding, joking or pulling one’s leg

I did find the fact that I wasn’t allow to imply that women are nosy very odd. Why? We are. I’m a woman, I am. It’s our job and we’re good at it. What’s the problem with that?

Am I annoyed at the FLE? No, of course not. She and my Editor stop me looking dumb…you gotta love that....now on to something completely different...

Bye, bye birdie...

I have had this bird nesting in a hanging wall ornament that is beside my front door. It has been a tad inconvenient for both of us as every time I arrive home from somewhere I forget the bird’s there and I charge up the stairs and scare both the bird and myself. She scarpers and I usually swear. Anyway, we had gotten into this strange pattern and the bird continued to nest there. I can be a total bitch – no, really – but I was not about to evict her with an egg in the nest. This morning the bird was doing what birds do and the egg was there. When I got home this arvo, no bird and no egg – also no note. You would think after free rent she would have least said goodbye. I suspect a lizard played toe cutter and ate the egg. That’s nature and circle of life…

Do you want to win some fantastic holiday reading? Of course you do. If so come celebrate the Twelve days of Romance with 12 authors from Ellora's Cave, Wild Rose Press, Total-E-Bound and Cerridwen Press. Each day beginning December 8th and running through December 19th one of the twelve authors will tell what their "True love gave to them" on either their blog or website.Collect all twelve answers and e-mail them to anny@annycook.com with 12 days of Romance in the subject line to win some great books.

There will be three lucky winners. The prizes –1st prize--6 books, 2nd prize--4 books, 3rd prize--2 books. All books and prize winners will be drawn randomly

About Me

Copyright notice...

All written materials featured on this blog are protected under copyright. Any use of part or all of this material without the express written permission of the author is an infringement of personal creative property and subject to legal action.

Amarinda Jones

Website

Legal notice

Any story, discussion or any written word or thought on the Amarinda Jones blog does not represent any individual or group living, dead or the undead.

It is absolutely your right and duty of care to your own mental health not to read this blog. If you do read and continue to read the Amarinda Jones blog you do it at your own risk.