Wednesday, May 27, 2009

This is not not a Contest

The winner will be published in an edition alone on a single, nice looking frontpage on Lamination Colony.

The winner will also receive a bunch of stuff. This is a contest.

You can win.

I have some homemade art. This:

You can have that.

I have a picture of my ass when I was like 22 (age not verified, but I was legal), you can have that too, my ass looks good in it, I was tan, you can post it on the internet wherever I won't be mad. It is possible as well to opt out of the ass picture.

You can have copies of No Colony 1 & 2, you can have those if you don't yet.

I have an extra copy of Chelsea Martin's everything was fine until whatever, the winner will get that too. I like that book a lot, Chelsea fucking kicks serious ass, that book is enough reason to enter a free contest.

I'll give you some Stephen Dixon books and some books that I bought with the intention of reading and haven't yet and still want but I will give them to you if you win this contest, free, based around the conceit of sharing and enjoying writing.

I'll try to give you some money if I have some extra when the winner comes along. At least a beer or two, if you drink beer, and if you don't, soda. You will get more quantity of product if you choose to get soda instead of beer.

There's always water.

I will promote the winning piece and the websites related to the authors of the piece.

** A list of additional donated prizes has gotten Quite Insane, and is listed at the bottom of this post **

This is a serious contest, there will be a winner, (at least 1-2) runner ups (depending on the # of entries vs # of prizes), everyone will get free shit, it will be free and people will read words maybe and talk about it not because there was a contest but because there are words.

Donated prizes will be distributed among the winner and the runner ups as I see fit: I will try to be fair and cool like butter.

ENTRY SPECIFICATIONS:

Texts between 1 and 2000 words. Just words. Text. There can be pictures in it too. Photos. Stuff. Not poetry or fiction or creative nonfiction, in the name of it, but anything. Words. Say something.

** BY THE ABOVE LINE I MEAN ALL WRITING IS ALLOWED. All forms of words are welcome. **

1 entry per person.

I'm going to read the entries with time I would have spent looking at websites I always look at anyway or watching poker on TV or something stupid.

Winners will be judged on the basis of how much I enjoy them, or think they are good.

Anyone can enter, if you enter under a pseudonym the prize will go to the pseudonym.

If you put terms in quotes that aren't speech in the piece you are disqualified.

If anyone is interested in donating further prizes for entrants, money or books or personal items or offers of fun, please email me, I will announce them and link there here at the bottom of this post.

Please blog this contest around.

Promotional contests should not cost money. Didn't you ever listen to Fugazi.

** WHERE TO SEND **

Please send contest entries to laminationcolony [at] gmail [dot] com, include THIS IS NOT NOT A CONTEST in the title, entries will be accepted for one week, until Friday June 5.

* a set of six drawings of video game controllers drawn by Steven Seighman of Monkeybicycle for the cover of Hobart's games issue

* a ruled Moleskine notebook - unopened, in original wrapping; the next edition of 'Smoke: a London Peculiar', the magazine of words and images inspired by the city (issue 14 out soon-ish); + a 'feature article' to the winner of the contest to write their thoughts on writing for Writers' Bloc, if they wish, all from Vaughan Simons of Writers' Bloc

* a copy of Kathryn Regina's 'i am in the air right now' from Greying Ghost Press

* a copy of the 'Meeting People is Easy' documentary on Radiohead, donated by Shome Dasgupta

* a first edition signed copy of William Gay's Twilight, a signed copy of Craig Clevenger's The Contortionist's Handbook, and a galley of the forthcoming novel Johnny Future by Steve Abee, all from MacAdam / Cage

Great idea! But how does one submit? And can it be previously published text? Not fiction or poetry, I understand. The ass prize is so OTT is should be the grand prize. Of course, it naturally divides in two for sharing.

when i saw nick cave in the fall they did deanna. it was awesome. the acoustic version is even more badass. it makes me want to put a fist through a face. right through.although if i were ever going to stab or be stabbed to death i think that oh darling would be the song. i don't know. it feels right.

pat walsh at macadam/cage told me he will donate a first edition signed copy of william gay's twilight and the forthcoming novel johnny future by steve abee. you can email me if you need any more info.