My Chaotic World

This will be the place to read about my 4 journeys as a gestational surrogate and my hectic life with 2 kiddos. I may even share some recipes from time to time. Check it out frequently for the latest happenings. :)

Saturday, January 10, 2015

After 2 years in braces, Emerson finally finished phase 1 of his treatment. He got them when he was 8. That seems pretty young, but his treatment requires 2 phases. Phase 1 was to correct his cross bite and he only had braces on his top teeth. Phase 2 will happen when he is 12-13 years old and he will have a full mouth of metal.

This event wasn't supposed to happen until 1/28, but one of his brackets popped off earlier this week. We went to the ortho on 1/6 to get it fixed, but he decided to take them off instead. He was so close to removal anyway. It just made sense. Hmmm... Maybe I should try that exit strategy? I want my braces off too, dang it!

Friday, January 02, 2015

For our 15th anniversary, I chose for us to return to our previous stomping grounds in Colorado. It was a short trip, but we managed to do everything we set out to do. I wish we could have stayed a little longer.

12/12---To start the trip off, we drove to High Point to drop off the boys at my Mom's house. She watched them while we were gone. We headed out to Raleigh to stay the night before our flight out of RDU. I had reservations for us at The Angus Barn that night. The thing is, I also invited our best friends (Jason & Natascha) to join us without Clayton's knowledge. We had a wonderful time hanging with them for the evening.

Love all these people :)

12/13---We got up bright and early to head to the airport. Unfortunately, it wasn't a good morning. I was dying for some good coffee and so we stopped at the first Starbucks we saw. After walking away with our cups, we realized that we couldn't carry our drinks through security. Ugh. We walked back inside the cafe and sat down. I proceeded to mention that I had somehow kept my Ugg boots clean for a long time and hoped to keep them that way. About 5 seconds later, I dropped my entire coffee and it went all over my left boot. I about cried. Sigh...

Our first flight of 38 minutes took us right back to our home of Charlotte. Yes, I know we should have flown out of our own airport, but we saved over $300 by going out of RDU instead. We couldn't get a direct flight from CLT either, but we got to fly direct to Denver from Charlotte on the RDU itinerary. Weird. In the end, it was worth the extra driving.

As soon as we got to Denver, we headed to our old hometown of Johnstown for lunch. Huang Garden is the best Chinese restaurant ever and we miss it so much. It didn't disappoint. Before leaving, I walked into the local grocery store next door for their awesome homemade flour tortillas and guacamole. Yummm

We checked into our hotel in Fort Collins (The Armstrong). It is one of our favorite places to hang out. Even when we lived in Colorado, we stayed in this hotel multiple times for staycations. It is eclectic in decor and perfectly located near Old Town. We love it there.

Our cool tub in the honeymoon suite

That night was spent in Cheyenne, Wyoming (about 45 minutes north of Fort Collins). Steve (C's dad) & Sandy drove from Nebraska and joined us at Stephanie (C's sister) & Tom's house for the evening. We went out to Steamboats Steak & Smokehouse for dinner. I miss all of these people so dang much.

12/14---We met our old neighbors, The Pratts, for breakfast at Snooze. They lived a couple of houses down from us and I used to have coffee with Crystal quite often in the mornings. Our kids loved each other and my boys miss them very much.

FYI-Snooze is an amazing place with the best breakfast EVER.

Around lunchtime, Clayton dropped me off at Centerra in Loveland while he went to go meet some old work buddies of his. I ate lunch at Bent Fork with my good friend Johnna and then we shopped around the Promenade. It was like I had never left. I miss her muchly. She was one of the first people to reach out to me when we first moved to CO. I needed a friend and she recognized that. She's pretty dang awesome.

For dinner, Clayton and I went to Beau Jo's for a mile high pie. We also got our favorite cheese bread with honey, but it wasn't as good as it used to be. We weren't really impressed with our dinner. I remember Beau Jo's being way better than it was that night.

12/15---Our Anniversary DayClayton had a surprise for me. He booked us a portrait session with a local photographer. He also booked me a hair and makeup session beforehand. What a cool idea! We haven't had photos of ourselves in a long time. Some photos were taken in a park and others were taken in downtown Fort Collins. I can't wait to see how they turned out.

Dinner was at Jay's Bistro, but we ended up having to take it back to our room because I got sick to my stomach. Thankfully, I managed to eat my food later that night and it was oh-so-good. It wasn't the way I wanted to spend our anniversary night, but that is okay. I am just glad I didn't get sick earlier in the day.

I wish I could have a makeup artist do this for me everyday. I stink at applying makeup, lol.

Thursday, January 01, 2015

We had a low-key night at home with the kiddos last night. We played Farkle, ate pizza, and watched the ball drop in NYC at midnight. It doesn't get any lamer than that, lol. I have been under the weather lately, so I had to call off a trip to Raleigh to see our besties. Major bummer.

On the surrogacy front, I had a baseline ultrasound done this past Monday (12/29) and my lining is a little thick. This happened on last cycle's baseline too. It turns out that this same thing has happened to several other surros using the same doctor recently. I think he orders the ultrasound too early. As soon as I stop birth control pills (used to control the IVF cycle), I am expected to shed my lining. That is not an immediate thing though and the doctor must not be taking that into account. I didn't start until 4-5 days later. That wasn't enough time before the ultrasound. Now I get to go back on Monday for a follow-up to make sure I am ready to begin the next phase of IVF. As long as my lining has thinned, I will be fine. A frozen transfer is set for 1/22 in Connecticut. Due date will be 10/10/15, if everything goes according to plan. Please wish my IPs luck for the new year!

Friday, December 26, 2014

So sorry for abandoning my blog. I am much more active on Facebook. I tend to post photos and stories there, so I don't feel the need to blog here also. My hope is to get back over here on the good ole blog in 2015, but I can't make any promises.

If you are curious about my recent surrogacy journey, here are the deets:

Cycle #2
12/17---began Lupron injections for second IVF cycle
12/29---baseline ultrasound and bloodwork
1/13---lining check ultrasound and bloodwork
1/22---frozen transfer of one or two 5-day embryos in CT

The first cycle was a bust. I was devastated and the intended parents were bummed. It sucks to have everything look good and then for it all to turn south. That's okay. We have a new game plan for January and I have a very good feeling about it. Please wish my IPs much luck for a 2015 baby (or babies). :)

BTW, I received Christmas cards with photos of my previous 3 surrobabies. They are all so beautiful!! Even though they aren't my kids, I am incredibly proud of them. The pics are already prominently displayed on my fridge (along with their past Christmas photos). I just love seeing these families everyday. :)

Hope you all had a very merry Christmas!

Here are a few more pics from my trip for transfer #1 (my mom and I visited NYC):

Friday, September 19, 2014

Well, it is official. I am finally taking injections for the upcoming surrogacy journey as of today. These are the little shots that go in my stomach. The med is Lupron. It is typically used for testicular cancer patients, but it has an off-label use for IVF because it shuts the ovaries down. My ovaries need to be shut down so that they don't release any eggs during our IVF cycle. Since my eggs aren't being used (an egg donor is being used instead), this is a desirable thing. The sides effects suck because this all equates to menopause-hot flashes, headaches, increased appetite, etc. The blue and orange pills are prenatal vitamins and the red pill is birth control. Yes, birth control sounds weird to take when you are trying to get pregnant, but there is a good reason for it. It helps sync my cycle with the egg donor's. We have to be at the same point in our cycles to make this all work. My body would reject her fertilized egg if I was in a different phase. Transfer is set for sometime between 10/30-11/5. It will all depend on how the cycle goes. I am so excited for my new couple!! Hopefully, all will go well and they will get a new baby for 2015. :)

Tuesday, September 02, 2014

My last Stitch Fix was seriously awesome! I ended up only keeping 2 items though. It was a tough call. I wanted to buy the whole shebang but it just didn't work out. Here's what I got:

1) Brentwood Tiered Striped Tank Top by Pixley

2) Priya Graphic Chevron Print Mixed Material Tank by Pomelo

3) Bryan Short-Sleeve Open-Front Cardigan by 41Hawthorn

4) Marquis French Terry Dolman Sweatshirt by Kut From The Kloth

5) Florence Colorblocked Dress by 41Hawthorn

I had to have the tiered shirt because it is so soft and comfy. It is really cool too. I love the striped tiered fabric. The other keeper was the chevron shirt. The design and colors are unique. I ended up sending the other 3 items back because I already have a similar cardi in my closet, the sweatshirt was a bit oversized, and the dress was just okay (I didn't love it).

Friday, August 22, 2014

To all the naysayers, you were wrong. The glue behind braces does indeed stain. This was one of the reasons that I did not get clear brackets. I can't stand that my teeth look so yellow now. On the first day that I got braces, the glue was undetectable. Now, 6 weeks later, I am sad to see the glue so stained. I brush my teeth many times a day and use a Waterpik. I don't let drinks or food sit on my teeth long. My oral care has been meticulous since I became a metal mouth. Sigh... If I had clear brackets, I would be ticked right now. Glad I switched to metal just before they started to put the ceramic ones on.

{Day 1 compared to week 6}

The top is looking great and the bottom front teeth are finally moving. Interesting thing to note-It has taken me 5 1/2 weeks to finally be able to bite into something with my front teeth. It was too painful up until this point.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Yes, that is a beer. Clayton gave me an assortment of gifts and this beer was a part of it. What made it special? Well, it is a beer from Fort Collins, CO, that combines two great breweries-New Belgium Brewing Company and Odell Brewing Company. When we used to live near there, we visited Odell many times and loved their tasting room. Unfortunately, you cannot find their beers here in NC, so this was a nice surprise. New Belgium is another favorite of ours, so this beer was perfect. Great find hubby!

This thing is my new best friend. I am amazed at how well a Waterpik works on getting food out of my braces and from in between my teeth. I use it several times daily and it takes the place of flossing (which is a HUGE pain in my rear right now).

Clayton arranged for my parents to take the boys for the night, so that we could go on a food tour of NoDa. He totally surprised me with this as I had never heard of such a thing. We started off with treats from Amelie's. Heist Brewery served up beer samples and some amazing flatbreads. Ozpresso was our next stop for coffee drinks. One of them included vanilla ice cream---yum! We then walked over to a King of Pops cart for ridiculous good popsicles. I got coffee and doughnuts, while C opted for cucumber mint. Revolution Pizza invited us in for curry chicken kabobs and bruschetta. We ordered a beer sampler to go with it. That included: Sierra CANfusion-Oskar Blues, Triple C Hefeweizen, Greenflash West Coast IPA (MY personal favorite), and NoDa Ghost Hop White IPA. After that, we walked across the street to Boudreaux's for shrimp and crawfish etouffee. We ended the tour at Dolce Vita with blueberry tea cocktails.

After all that indulgent fun, we went over to a folk festival at Triple C Brewing Company. It was a bust. Too many people, nothing to do, nowhere to sit, and the beer wasn't all that good. We left and went by Maggie Moo's to pick up cupcakes that C had special ordered for me. They were 4 of each flavor, with cake and ice cream being a part of each one. I can't remember the flavors, but they were very good. Dinner was bought from my favorite food truck, Tacos Morelia. It was a great day!! I want to do it all again. :)

Friday, August 01, 2014

Well, it has been a looooooong 3 weeks. I hate these horrid things and can't wait to get them off. I can already say that there is no way in heck I am going to wear them for 2 years. On days where I talk a lot, my mouth feels like I have razor blades in it. Regardless of how bad they feel, I love how they are providing quick results. My top teeth look so much better. The one tooth on the top right in the photo, has almost completely tucked into where it belongs. That was fast! Look at how crooked my wire was at the beginning and how straight it is now. My bottom teeth don't seem to be doing anything though. Hmmmm... I will see the ortho next week and I hope he will reassure me that those teeth will indeed move. They are crowded upfront.

Monday, July 14, 2014

The top teeth have already improved. The upper lateral incisor (the pink bracket to the right of the upper front tooth in purple) has started moving back into the proper place.

Ok, so I totally changed my mind on ceramic Clarity braces at the last minute. I was already in the chair and they had the box of ceramics on the table next to me when I began drilling them with lots of questions. The answers didn't make me happy so I chose to go with metal. The reasons were:

1) Ceramic bonding glue stains and can be seen behind the bracket. There isn't anything you can do about it.

2) The clear or light-colored ligatures (rubber bands that go around the brackets) change color and don't do anything to hide the ceramic brackets once stained by coffee, tea, soda, tomato sauce, curry, etc. In fact, they can look downright gross if you stain them.

3) Ceramic brackets are larger and my bottom teeth are tiny. Considering how hard it is to get my lips over my small metal brackets, I can't imagine doing that.

4) The removal of ceramics can be difficult. The bonding material is stronger and can pull the enamel off of your teeth. That is a risk I am not willing to take. I have a small amount of bonding on the surface of one of my top front teeth and the thought of getting a ceramic bracket pulled off of it scares me.

5) Ceramic brackets are brittle and they can break. Enough said.

6) Metal is stronger and can work a little bit faster than ceramic.

Some people pay more for ceramic but my ortho charges the same either way. I really wish that the ceramics didn't have so many cons because I really wanted them, but I am happy with the metal. Since I have metal, it was easy for me to go with colorful ligatures since there is no way to hide the fact that I am in braces.

The only bad thing is that I cannot eat properly. My molars are so sore that biting isn't something that I can do as of yet. It has been weird eating soft foods all the time. Oh well, it will all be worth it in the end. Heck, I was having a hard time eating before braces because my molars had just enough space between them that they caught food every time I ate. It was terribly painful and the main reason that I opted for braces in the first place.

Saturday, July 05, 2014

I finally cut off some of my ridiculously long hair last month. I got 8 inches chopped and now it feels so much better. It has been 3 years since I last cut my hair. That is too long to go between cuts, I know. My feeling is that I would rather spend possible salon money on spa treatments (massages, facials, etc.). I love being pampered but don't really care about getting my locks chopped.

I have been having a horrible problem with my back teeth getting gaps in between them. Pockets in the gum have formed due to this. They catch food constantly and really hurt. I am in pain almost every time I eat and I am sick of it! It all has been happening because I had 4 wisdom teeth and 2 molars removed back in 2005. The removal of those teeth caused the rest of my teeth to shift. My molars stayed in place but the rest of my teeth moved toward the front of my mouth, causing them to crowd. I really don't care to fix the minor crookedness of my teeth as that doesn't really bother me. It is the pain that prompted me to correct my mouth. I will be getting ceramic braces on Wednesday. They will be the color of my teeth with a small silver wire. It will look like I am wearing a retainer unless you look really close at my mouth. Wish me luck!

Thursday, July 03, 2014

My last Stitch Fixwas perfect. I love my stylist (Jackie)! I requested items that could accommodate a growing belly and she picked items that will work well when I am in the awkward early pregnancy/post-partum phases. Here's what I got:

1. Pomelo- Moni Geo Print & Camisole Blouse-Love the stud detail on this top. It is a pretty orange color and lightweight for summer. I have received numerous compliments on it.

2. Liverpool Carolyn Colored Cuffed Denim Short-These shorts are white denim and they cuff at the bottom (can be rolled down as the cuffs aren't sewn down). I really didn't think I would like them but they fit perfectly and feel good.

3. Leota Haylee Abstract Chevron Print Swing Skirt-This skirt is incredibly comfortable. Lovely colors and pretty design. It has a stretchy waistband, making it a great piece for pregnancy.

4. Pomelo Corinna Striped Heather Dolman Top- I already have this top in blue/black, but I was still thrilled to see this one in my box. It is so soft and comfy. The cut is flattering on everyone that I have seen on the web. It's a perfect top.

5. 41Hawthorn Montgomery Chevron Cross-Fit Top- This top is super soft and the color is beautiful. The only thing I don't like about it is the fabric can move rather easily to show off more skin than I want to. It needs a snap in the chest area to hold it closed.

Tuesday, July 01, 2014

Father's Day was a lot of fun this year. We went to Amelie's for a nice breakfast, played around at Discovery Place in Charlotte, ate an early dinner at Tupelo Honey (oh-my-yum!), and then went to Studio Movie Grill at the Epicentre to see X-Men.

Love this pic! Hayden's photo bomb makes me LOL every time I look at it.

The way to my hubby's heart is gifts (and homemade cookies). He is like a little kid in that respect. We gave him a couple of Tommy Bahama shirts (since he will never buy them for himself), beer soap (yes, you read that right, lol), a new beer glass, Aveda shampoo & conditioner, and a beer shirt.

Friday, June 20, 2014

I have a little secret to reveal. I know I have been absent from my blog for a long time now but I will soon be updating regularly again thanks to surrogacy journey #4. Yep, you read that right. If you are a Facebook friend, you have known about this for several months. I didn't want to announce it on my blog until I knew for sure it was going to happen. Why am I pursuing this again? I am totally insane, I guess, lol. To be honest, I am trying to end my surrogacy life on the best note possible. My last surrogacy was very stressful and hard to deal with (hence the reason that there are very few posts on my blog for journey #3). Even though that journey was rough, I made amends with the mother and I miss her muchly after all has been said and done. The conversations that we had after the birth should have happened early in the pregnancy. I had no idea how many life struggles she was dealing with during the IVF cycle. If had known then, what I know now, things would have been very different and I hate that.

Anyway, I am working with a wonderful agency this time around and they have made everything go so smoothly. All of my previous journeys were independent so it is nice letting someone else do all the work. I am matched with an international couple and they are going to be awesome. I begin meds on 6/27 and we are looking at transferring around 8/9.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Banshee season 2 just wrapped up on Cinemax this month. I made my way onto set a total of 5 times during the season. It would have been more if I hadn't of been pumping milk for the first half of filming. In the above frame, Rebecca (played by the lovely Lili Simmons) is snooping around the dressing room at the strip club. I was sitting down in the background, putting my makeup on. In the montage below, I am the gal walking out of the dressing room in the red shirt. Clay Burton (played by Matt Rauch) is seen bypassing me in the club. He is one of the funniest people that I have ever encountered while on set. He is incredibly boisterous and loud, lol. I got the honor of him singing the song "Brandy" to me. Love him! I hope he continues to be Kai Proctor's henchman in the future because I would hate for him to ever leave the show.

I love my new hobby! There were 2 times last year that I got asked to be on set directly by the casting director and I had to turn both times down though. That royally sucked. I was asked to be in Banshee's season 2 finale but I was on vacation in Orlando at the time. The other gig was on the new movie that Kevin Smith filmed in Charlotte (Tusk). I was in Raleigh to see Bon Jovi that day. It was my only shot to be on Tusk so I was super sad about missing out. Oh, and one time I got asked to be on Homeland but had to back out due to being sick. Not cool. Anyway, I can't wait to see what is in store for me this year. I look forward to many more opportunities to be on set.

BTW, I got to take part in two other projects last year, The Novice (new series on USA Network) and Captive (a movie about the Atlanta court case where Brian Nichols shot a judge, fled, ran into a woman's home, and then had a change of heart when the woman read "The Purpose Driven Life" to him). Clayton was also in Captive with me.

Saturday, March 01, 2014

Hayden has been bugging me for some cool plaid shirts to layer over his tees. I have to say that the look suits both boys. Even though I captured H making a funny face, they are both quite handsome. :)

I accompanied Hayden's 5th grade class on a STEM field trip at the Charlotte race track. It was incredibly dull, I have to admit. The kids had to do all these tests for balance, speed, etc. It sounded like it would be fun but it wasn't. The highlight for all the kids was the 2 laps we got to take via van around the track. It was really neat to feel how high the inclines are. The driver stopped on one of the turns and we all freaked out. It felt just like our van would fall over. After the track, we went over to Hendrick Motorsports to browse the museums and to talk to an engineer that worked there. The engineer just happened to be a mechanical engineer from NC State. He was in college at the same time Clayton and I were there. We reminisced after he was done speaking to the kids. It turns out that he almost applied to work at my husband's company but the Hendrick job popped up at just the right time. Very cool dude, I must say.

Hayden is on the right, behind the kid in the purple pullover.

Oh Molly, you crack me up! She loves boxes and laps. I don't know how she curls up so tight. She's so cool. :)

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Clayton adores sugar cookies so I made sure to make a batch for V-day. The icing was too hard to pipe though so I only decorated 3 cookies before giving up. Clayton decorated mine for me but I didn't get a photo.

My boys munching down on our traditional chocolate fondue dessert

I made some homemade cracker-thin crust pizzas. The boys didn't even notice that the pepperoni was placed in a heart shape before Clayton cut it. I had to show them the photo to prove it, lol.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

The week of Valentine's was full of white stuff. The kids had a half day on Tuesday and then got out of school for the rest of the week. It was crazy! Considering it was 75 degrees yesterday, it is hard to imagine that the ground looked like this just a week ago.

We were one of the few homes in the 'hood to actually own a snow shovel, lol. Clayton doesn't miss having to shovel the driveway in Colorado.

Hayden

This was measured while it was still snowing. There was probably another inch of snow by the time it stopped. I measured it on our backyard table and no, this wasn't in a snow drifted area.

Friday, February 21, 2014

Clayton and his beer brewing buddies got together in our garage to brew a Kolsch style beer back on 2/9. I love when they brew because it gives me an opportunity to try new recipes on them. I made an onion dip with the porter that they brewed together and it was pretty tasty. The chicken enchilada pinwheels were really good too. The real star of the show though was the mushrooms. Ahhh, the mushrooms. They were slighty spicy with a great smoky bacon undertone. The cheese and buttery panko crumbs made it all come together so well. I was afraid that they wouldn't eat them but they LOVED them. Here are the tried-n-true (TNT) recipes if you want to give them a go:

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

My awesome friend and neighbor, Jessica, gave me this awesome monogrammed scarf for Christmas. Her mom made it for me. Love it!!

Emerson had a marketing PBL (project based learning) for school last month. The kids had to make up a product, create a store sign, set the cost, and sell their goods at a market fair. Big E sold out of his cute Fuzzy Buddies and was able to buy several products from his classmates.

I have been so slow in getting the house painted. Hayden's back wall was my most recent project. The other 3 walls will be painted a light blue and the curtains will be changed to orange or navy chevron ones. Whenever I get it all done (which won't be anytime soon), I will post a completed pic.

This is how we found Emerson on the evening after the boys' recent sleepover. Unfortunately, he got sick. We suspect it was Norovirus. He puked 6 times that night. I got it the next night and puked 5 times. Hayden got it the next night and he puked 7 times. Clayton came home from work the next day and didn't feel good (though his lucky butt never threw up---so not fair!). It was atrocious. The bright side is that I lost a few pounds, though that is not my preferred method, lol.

About Me

I am a stay-at-home Mom to 2 crazy boys and married to the best hubby ever. I went to NC State, I love to cook and I am a 3X gestational carrier/surrogate. My first surro journey was completed in 2007 (baby boy born 12/27/07), the second journey was completed in 2009 (baby girl born 03-06-09), and the third journey in 2013 (baby girl born 03-15-13). The surrogirls are sisters. I am now working on my 4th and final journey with an international couple. :)