Tattle tales of Bjork's Long Lost Cousin

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Do you cheer for tea or coffee?

Personally, there’s nothing more seductive than an early morning brew – whether it’s coffee or tea. Both drinks bring a measure of warmth and serenity to a chaotic world of iPhone’s, deadlines and schedules. It’s the taxi-driver’s mate, a lawyer’s best friend, or a stay-at-home parent’s companion.

My favourite drink in the morning – coffee. Photo: Tina Tek.

The only difference in my eyes, is tea has a spiritual aura surrounding this fabulous drink. I always imagine coffee drinkers to have foam solidifying on their upper lips, whilst juggling a suitcase, laptop and an iPhone on their way to work.

I’ve always wondered why this is the case. Why the coffee drinker has always been mocked and ridiculed for being an addict, while tea drinkers have gotten away with such abuse. It may be the fact that coffee houses in the 17th Century were formed alongside insurance companies to attract new customers. Or it could be the fact we picture coffee drinkers with yellow teeth, a nose which is dipped in espresso and blood-shot eyes. Not to mention coffee takes a significant portion out of one’s weekly expenses.

However, tea has gone trendy as well – to the point of being frivolous. Many tea houses now package tea leaves in swanky designer boxes, delicate porcelain teapots, cups and saucers. I’m intimidating to go to tea houses now, in fear that I wouldn’t know what white monkey jasmine tea is. I’m much more happy using a tea bag from Tetley and eating it with an apple and pecan cake.

Can’t decide which tea to choose from. Photo: Tina Tek.

They’ve also got many interesting concoctions, such as watered downed Turkish apple and cinnamon, white flowery pekoe or green rooibos with berries. It sounds like a lawn mower has gone through his mulch, picked out the odd berries and tree roots from it and brewed it for afternoon tea. I can feel many tea drinkers whose preferred poison is an English Breakfast shaking their heads at the way tea is being marketed now.

For me, I prefer drinking a nice cup of flat white with a breakfast which resembles this:

However, I want to rant about the stupidity of decaf coffee. For me, there’s never acceptable to drink decaf coffee, it belongs in the bin. It’s like drinking mocktails, you’re missing the point of the product.

Now it’s over to you. Are a coffee lover or a tea drinker? Do you think decaf coffee is pointless? I hope I’m not the only person who feels this way about decaf coffee.