Top Publisher Sues The Dorking Review

Due to the current Typesetters strike, some images may not relate to the featured story

Lawyers for top London publishing house, Stodgy and Wristflick have announced that they will be taking civil action against the team that put together this years surprise best seller The Dorking Review

A spokesman for S&W's lawyers said today that the management of the company had suffered unacceptable levels of ridicule since the book was published. And while Stodgy and Wristflick accept that they do not have a viable competitor to the book, they claim that by displaying the CEO's wife on the cover the people that put together The Dorking Review have over-stepped the bounds of decency.

The Review's editor, Barry Door has reacted angrily to the claim.

"It's not a woman, it's a dinosaur" he said. "That Bob calls the artist assured me that they found a dinosaur in Dorking and that's what he's drawn for the cover".

Stodgy and Wristflick's lawyers however state that Harry Law hasn't got a leg to stand on.

"It's obviously a photo of Fiona Box-Worthington on the cover" said the spokesman. "Anyone who's anyone in publishing can see that."

It's known within the Bloomsbury set that Rob Falls was a one-time lover of Mrs Fox-Whittington and there is speculation that he used a photograph from his private collection to use on the cover of the book.

When informed of this fact, Hairy Floor was heard to say:

"Oh shit, that's blown it. I'll have to sell me moped now."

Make churchmouse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

More fake news stories

New York, NY Donald Trump was pleased to announce today that Bill Cosby would be one of the celebrities on his next show. Others will include Michael Richards and Paula Deen.
"Dr. Cosby has requested that we make a few changes to our original for...

Under pressure from hairy-legged feminists, Hooters, a restaurant whose servers--young, nubile women in short shorts and abbreviated shirts emblazoned with the faces of owls whose eyes are "strategically positioned" to frame the wearers' breasts--is...

A new vaping company has come on the market that provides its users with atomic-borne, fracking-waste emissions instead of the water vapor used by traditional vaping horns.
Vape Rape LLC, headquartered outside Wheeling, W.Va. on a rezoned piece o...

GERMANY - Leading luxury car manufacturers from Germany today announced they have formed a joint venture for the development of self-driving vehicles for the U.S. market.
The Autonomous Hands-Off Luxury Engineering (A-HOLE) Group promises an ult...

Building upon the great success of Starbucks' Race Together campaign, a rival coffee house has unveiled their new concept of "Defend Your Position".
"What we found out very quickly is that people already have very set opinions on a great many sub...

Apple Computers, Inc. has announced that the Apple Stores, being a brick and mortar retailer, have joined the MCX (Merchange Customer Exchange) and will follow in Walmart's footsteps by no longer accepting Apple Pay.
"Walmart is the world's larges...

International Business Machinations (IBM) denied reports that it plans to lay off 100,000 of its employees after losses for each of the last 11 successive quarters.
"We're in the money," CEO Ginni Romney (no relation, as far as can be determined,...