The best grooming techniques, products, and time-savers to cut down your regimen to twelve minutes — so you can sleep in, and look good doing it.

Twelve Minutes in the Bathroom: Intro

Twelve Minutes in the Bathroom: Intro

The bathroom is a sanctuary any time but in the morning. We walk in a mess. We stink. We can't walk a straight line. We can't answer basic questions. We're more or less suffering from a mild concussion. Also, our hair looks stupid. So what do we do? We insult our corpses even further. We blast ourselves with hot water. We scrape our faces with a blade. We abrade our gums with bristles. We pour alcohol into our mouths — then we spit it out.

Twelve Minutes in the Bathroom: Intro (Cont'd)

Twelve Minutes in the Bathroom: Intro (Cont'd)

And we start to feel fantastic. We have transformed our reality. We have made ourselves look and feel right. We have been renewed, redeemed. We've become men. All in about 12 minutes. It's an underrated thing, the regimen. And so, in the interest of making every moment of this crucial ritual count, we offer a guide to the best way we know how to conduct it.