BDSM Relationships

The Truths behind BDSM Relationships

Though they resemble their vanilla cousins to a large extent, Dominance and submission relationships differ greatly based not only on the Power Exchange dynamics involved but based on the level of open communication and the willingness of each individual to open themselves up to their partner. This amazing mixture of acceptance, affection, exploration and vulnerability are the foundation of every healthy and long lasting BDSM relationship.
It’s imperative to understand that Dominance and submission is NOT domestic violence! It is two or more consensual adults engaging in a Power Exchange activity which they BOTH derive pleasure from. In a domestic violence situation, there is no consent by the individual (male or female) being victimized.

The most amazing essence of a Dominance and submission relationship isn’t
the erotic thrills or the “whips and chains” as most would believe it’s the communication. Dominants and submissives in a relationship speak about everything! Whereas most men and women entering into a vanilla relationship withhold information about their desires and sexual needs because they fear rejection or ridicule, in a Power Exchange relationship, these individuals candidly share their most embarrassing desires, their fears of abandonment, their fears of failure and never being good enough, their need for love and most importantly what these issues look like are immediately addressed. Granted the submissive typically opens him or herself up more so than the Dominant in this respect because let’s face it who wants a wimpy Dominant—besides don’t forget there is a power dynamic at work here. However it is through these revelations, this baring of the soul by both individuals that the foundation of the relationship is established.

This doesn’t mean that the submissive or the Dominant won’t decide somewhere along the line that this relationship isn’t for them or that fears won’t sometimes crop up and create obstacles, yet because of their willingness to be honest and bare their needs and in essence their soul and psyche to their partner this couple reaches a level of intense emotional connection much faster and I dare say, vastly deeper, than conventional relationships. I speak more on this topic in my new book, BDSM—The Naked Truth. This book not only provides you with a uniquely candid insight into Dominance and submission relationships, it shares some of the pitfalls and difficulties faced by individuals engaged in this vastly misunderstand lifestyle. BDSM—The Naked Truth is the SM 101 for the new millennium.

Now just because Dominance and submission relationships are open it doesn’t mean they don’t have their own hurdles to overcome. The very fact that you’re engaging in such emotional and psychological areas actually creates a whole host of different problems-obstacles-to deal with such as insecurities, fears, abandonment issues, jealousy, dependency issues, and even timing/pacing of how the relationship should progress. Sound familiar? It should. These are the same exact obstacles which arise in vanilla relationships, only now they’ll be addressed immediately and not overlooked or left to resolve themselves. Well, at least we hope that’s what will happen.

Now imagine all the possibilities which can arise when you have two consenting adults who are this open and honest in their relationship. Talk about amazing characters to create.