A place of stories and everyday living on the Gaspe Coast. I am a storyteller, a writer and a great listener. I will use this site to share some of the wisdom that I have learned on my own life's journey through the insightful art of storytelling, music, beauty and folklore of this amazing place.

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Monday, July 1, 2013

What have we told our daughters

Do you ever stop and think about what imprints have been passed on to you by your mother?

As women we have naturally taken on the characteristics of our mothers. As adults we see ourselves doing many of the things that our mothers would have done. We catch ourselves saying something and smile because it reminds us of her. Not all mother /daughter relationships are the same, some are great, some are difficult. Sometimes we share so much in common that it can make or break the relationship.

What we have to realize is that our mothers were first influenced by their mothers and they were influenced by your grandmothers and great grandmothers. You are a package of thoughts, feelings, emotions and characteristics that were handed down to you by the women who gave you birth.

When you find yourself dealing with the things of life, it is important to remember the women who came before you. Somewhere, somehow, they have left a trace of themselves in you and they are wanting you to live a better life then they were capable of living. It is up to you to think back from where you came and understand them, love and thank them. You must use what you have learned as a lesson to live your own life with joy, health, kindness and by using your greatest gifts to their full potential.

By understanding who they were, you can change the thoughts of limitations that they had and live your own life with possibilities, dreams and miracles. They are watching you and expecting you to do better and to pass on an example of a life well lived to your own daughters.

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About Me

My name is Mary, I am a woman and I have a story, just like all of you.

From an early age I was an observer and a storyteller who had a wonderful imagination.I enjoyed listening to others because I had a need to figure out their stories and wanted to understand them. Growing up, life happened... the days of my life turned into the pages of, what seemed, at times an unbelievable story.

I tried to handle each challenge with all the kindness and understanding that I could find within me, as each new scar settled into my broken innocence.

Now, I realize that each player who became a part of my life was living through their own dramatic story. Each being and acting the only way they knew how, according to the narrative they believed about themselves.

On July 22, 2013 my beautiful 25 year old daughter was operated for a brain tumor. It brought back the memories of losing my father to the same operation years ago. They took her in for her surgical procedure on a Sunday night. By 3 a.m. on Monday morning, after almost eight hours, it was over. We still did not know the details except that she was alive and that she responded to a few question when they woke her up minutes after the operation.

On Tuesday morning, the day after her surgery, the man who had been in my life for the past six years took his own life; it was surreal and impossible to believe. Inside, I was shattered but my daughter needed me and I knew that despite all the pain she was in, losing him would bring her more. At that moment I knew it was time to change my story.

I stepped back from the busyness of "normal" life, bowed my head and surrendered to the storm I was lost in. It was the most difficult challenge I had ever experienced and I knew that no one was coming to save me. No one could make it all better... .

My dream has always been to be a writer. I've longed to write about the lives of women from a personal and understanding perspective. I'm not a great writer... actually, far from it. I know I will never be a Jane Austin, nor an Emily Bronte; that is not the reason I write. My hope is that I can use my education, life experiences and story to encourage other women. My mother, who was my role model, always used to say that, "there are better days ahead". I believed her and have used those words throughout my life as a means of moving forward, despite the challenges that seemingly tried to block me.

As a student of the Simply Women Accredited Training Institute, I have the honor of working with the visionary empowerment coach and teacher Crystal Andrus, who is the head of a unique world wide women's empowerment educational movement.