And so the carousel bobs round again. Same names and offences. Same outcries and frustrations. Hot air on radio chat-shows; frigid indifference from those in power.

After watching Luis Suárez flinging himself to the turf at Anfield on Sunday, Tony Pulis was piety personified. "I am concerned about the simulation and putting pressure on the ref," he said. "It's a tough enough job as it is. For professional footballers to be doing that is just not right. Give him three games and he will stop falling over."

There is more chance of the Football Association making Pulis its next technical director. But the Stoke City manager cuts directly to the chase. What should be done to stop Gareth Bale, Ashley Young and others doing what, deep down, they know is wrong – but, when they get away with it, the scoreboard often tells them is right?

Let's breeze through the options...

Extra referees behind the goal

Seen as a miracle cure-all by the Uefa president, Michel Platini, but much like a 19th century 'health potion' you suspect there is more spin and quackery than substance behind it. Uefa's chief refereeing officer, Pierluigi Collina, however, believes extra referees have made a significant impact. In the in-no-way-biased "Additional assistant referees – a success story" on Uefa's website, Collina points to a "clear reduction of incidents, particularly holding, pulling and also blocking at set pieces – so mainly at corners and free-kicks … we noticed that during Euro 2012, there was an increased number of goals scored from headers. This is a consequence of the diminishing of pulling and pushing which makes it easier for an attacker to score a headed goal. We also had better control of the goalline to assess whether the ball crossed the line or not." Tell that to Ukraine's supporters, who saw a perfectly good Marko Devic goal ruled out against England.

Chances of it happening Probably quite high.

Chances of it making a difference Low. So far it doesn't seem to have discernable effect on diving in Champions League games.

Live video evidence during matches

Sounds preposterous, or utopian, or possibly both. But if changing human behaviour is about altering incentives, then this is a pretty dramatic one. Why dive when a fifth official in the stands can alert the referee, who would be waving a yellow card in your direction within 30 seconds or less?

Supported by Dave Whelan, who argues: "We have to say to Mr Blatter, whatever you say, the Premier League will help our officials with more technology. Tennis, cricket, rugby league: why not football? Why can't we get the decisions 99.9% correct?" The obvious downside is that it would slow the game down, at least initially. But once players realised they were going to get punished for diving it might actually stop them doing it, and would then mean no loss of time at all.

Chances of it happening Zilch, while Sepp Blatter or Michel Platini is around.

Chances of it making a difference Very high.

Retrospective video evidence

The sensible, live-in-a-semi-and-have-2.4-children choice and supported by Arsène Wenger, Pulis, David Moyes and every caller to 6-0-6 whenever this issue is discussed. However, Fifa is less keen because it regards the referee as omnipotent and fears establishing a precedent where other incidents are re-refereed at a later date.

Roy Hodgson, while manager of West Bromwich Albion, pointed out another potential flaw: "It will raise to some extent questions, sometimes, about delegates and assessors, such as are they local people seeing things with local eyes, or are they as neutral as we hope the referees will be?" That said, Major League Soccer created an anonymous five-person panel to rule on suspensions for simulation (which has been followed by other leagues) in 2011 and the world has not ended.

Another issue is where you draw the line? Earlier this year, Wenger argued for a "superior committee of ethics", adding: "With this committee, an obvious dive should be punished by a three-match ban. But it has to be obvious diving. For example, Ashley Young against QPR, I would not suspend him because I don't know if he lost his balance. He made more of it to get the penalty but it is not an obvious case for me." But what constitutes an obvious case? Purposely clipping and tumbling over an opposing player's foot is one thing; drawing contact when you're flat out before allowing yourself to go down quite another.

Chances of it happening In the Premier League? Moderate to low.

Either the Fifa's rule-making body Ifab would have to allow it, or the FA and its stakeholders (ie the Premier League, Football League, Uefa, Fifa, PFA, LMA, and the PGMO, which represents match officials) would have to approve it.

Chances of it making a difference High, although not 100% perfect. Would you care about a one-match ban if a cynical swan dive in the World Cup final earned your side the winning penalty?

Players and managers to realise they have a duty to the game

Don't be silly. Actually, that's a bit unfair. David Moyes is one of a handful of managers who have come out against simulation, saying; "I've said to my players that I don't want them diving. Of course people will go down but I don't like it. I will say it to them if I think they are going down outrageously or cheaply." But really, the stakes are too high these days.

Chances of it happening Arrange these words: frozen first will have hell over.