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Adric?

We’re sorry for the lateness of this piece, as preparations for my niece’s 6th birthday party and preparing my Eyecon event have gotten in the way of a regular schedule. It’s also been a sad week, with the death of screenwriter Lorenzo Semple Jr, best known for his work in the 60’s Batman series and actress Kate O’Mara, who played the renegade Time Lord The Rani in two 1980’s Doctor Who serials. Add to that the recent deaths of GWAR singer Dave Brockie and Stooges drummer Scott Asheton and it’s been a pretty rubbish time.

We start this week with the walking dead. A brewery in Philadelphia USA is brewing zombie beer, a beer that’s brewed with cranberries and ROASTED GOAT BRAIN. That’s right, beer that contains brains and doesn’t rot them. Secondly, the zombie apocalypse is coming to Ramsay Street. Yes, soon you’ll be able to watch Neighbours characters doing their usual mundane tasks and family dramas, all the while dodging the undead, in a 5 part web series. Shame they couldn’t just play it on free to air – I wonder if anyone would notice?

In the latest entry of the ongoing series ‘Michael Bay tries to ruin your childhood icons’ comes the first trailer for his reboot of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and its exactly what you’d expect. Explosions, slow motion, the heroes getting very little dialogue and Megan Fox even less. And while the heroine fainting is an overused cliché, in all fairness, if a 7 foot tall heavily armed turtle started talking to me, I’d probably faint as well. Rumours are swirling that the film is headed for reshoots of World War Z proportions (Which had as much of a third of the film redone), but we’ll have to wait and see.

Anyone wonder where they got the cash for all that pizza?

Second cab off the rank is the new X-Men: Days of Future Past trailer which proves once and for all that Sir Ian McKellen rocks a cape. If you aren’t sure who’s who (And there’s a lot of new characters), here’s a helpful mutant roll call TV spot for the film. The Wachowski’s new film, Jupiter Ascending, also gets a new trailer and while the film does look amazing, I have no idea what’s going on. There’s Channing Tatum in Elf ears, Mila Kunis as an alien princess and waitress, some sort of giant gargoyle thing and the one and only Sean Bean, who might survive this movie! Nahhh, I’m just kidding, he’s doomed.

We also have the first trailers for Into the Storm, which would appear to be a larger budgeted SyFy original, especially given the TORNADOES OF FIRE, and Hercules, which has Dwayne Johnson (Who keeps dropping hints he’s playing a DC Comics character) in a lion skin cloak. I still don’t think it’ll be a good movie, but it looks like good dumb fun in the tradition of early 80’s sword and sorcery and if loving that is wrong, then I don’t want to be right.

There’s a close up picture of the new Green Goblin from The Amazing Spider-Man 2 and he looks impressively grotesque. Not quite as creepy as Willem Defoe, but he doesn’t need makeup to be creepy. Furthermore, Marvel’s next big Spidey related event will be Spider-Verse, which will bring together every version of Spider-Man there was or will be, from Peter Parker to Miles Morales to the infamous Spider-Ham! Meanwhile, on the other side of the fence, DC are said to be announcing a series of movies soon, with a Justice League film said to be among them. So ah… Better late than never?

Arnold Schwarzenegger has explained why he’ll look older in Terminator Genesis and John Boyega (Attack the Block) is said to be up for a role. Prometheus 2 has both a writer and a release date, Andy Serkis will be directing one of the two competing adaptions of The Jungle Book (The other version has Idris Elba as Shere Khan though) and the rumours that Indiana Jones could be recast are floating around again. Recasting the role while Harrison Ford is still with is as almost as bad an idea as passing the hat on to Shia LeBouf at the end of Crystal Skull, as was once rumoured. The Harry Potter spin off Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them is set to become a trilogy, Peter ‘Chewbacca’ Mayhew has cancelled a convention appearance owing to filming commitments, which as we all know only means one thing and I think you know what that is.

In Dejarik as in life, sit back, relax and let the Wookie win.

Moving to the idiot box, not only are Community doing an animated GI Joe themed episode (From which we have a clip from here), but it’s looking likely to be picked up for a sixth season! Now all we need is a movie… Agents of SHIELD announced two new cast – Amy Acker will play the mysterious cellist mentioned by Agent Coulson in The Avengers and Patrick Brennan is to play villain Blackout. From Dusk Till Dawn has been renewed and there’s a look the Defiance web series that’ll bridge the gap between seasons 1 and 2. I’d almost forgotten about that show…

More pictures have been released showing the characters of Gotham, including a young Selina Kyle (Who the Daily Mail initially described as sexy – she’s 14), Alfred Pennyworth and star of the show, Jim Gordon. In further DC TV news, the producer of Arrow wants a Black Canary spinoff, showing what she’s doing between her appearances on Arrow. I’ll watch it, even more so if it’s like the Birds of Prey episode of Batman: The Brave and the Bold.

One of the most loathsome figures in Doctor Who history is coming back thanks to Big Finish Productions. That sinking feeling you have is correct – Adric is returning. Yes, the intensely irritating boy genius is coming back in a series of audio plays, voiced by Matthew Waterhouse who played the role back in 1980-2. I can’t say I approve of this, but Big Finish turned Colin Baker’s 6th Doctor around by actually writing good scripts for him, so anything is possible. For those new Who fans who have no idea what I’m talking about, think of him as the Wesley Crusher of Doctor Who, with none of Wil Wheaton’s redeeming features. Yes, that’s very uncomplimentary to Matthew Waterhouse (Who I’m sure is a nice man and doesn’t deserve this treatment), but I’ve tried to listen to his DVD commentaries and they’re genuinely painful.

There’s only one man who can wear that haircut and that’s Johnny Ramone!

A collection of Hellboy creator Mike Mignola’s concept art for Atlantis: The Lost Empire has been found, comedian Alan Brough has joined the cast of Night Terrace, the Tim Powers novel The Anubis Gates Is becoming a stage play and it’s finally time for the boys to get Star Wars swimwear, with R2D2 board shorts soon available for sale. There’s a hellish amount of innuendo that can be made, which sadly we don’t have time for.