par Threnody

A Peculiar Lesson

Wait. I'm sorry to interrupt such a promising story but since I have the chance to have a very attentive audience today, I would like to venture on a little digression here. When you happen to be told a tale that begins with "Once upon a time", and they almost all do, you might be tempted to ask that frivolous yet very pragmatic question: 'Alright dude, but when exactly?', to which the common storyteller, taken abashed, will find nothing to respond but 'Well, you know, once.'
Frankly, from a purely chronological point of view, this is fairly unpleasant. So, today, with your agreement, I would like to free myself from that yoke of incertitude and propose an alternative introduction to my tale-to-be. Here it comes.

Not so long ago, when the world was, well, pretty much the same as it is now, lived a young lady whose name was Titania. She dwelt with her parents in a small cottage built at the edge of the woods and would spend hours and hours wandering and roaming amidst the trees, enjoying the musky scent of the fresly-blossomed bloom or the soft caress of the grass and fallen leaves upon her bare feet. Her father was a reputed clocksmith in the area and her mother ran a bakery shop in a hamlet nearby. Titania, unlike most of the girls her age, had always preferred loneliness to company and she did not take any interest in the social life of the neighbourhood whereas all the others lasses were each single morning eager to hear the latest gossip or the weirdest rumor. That is probably the reason why she so cherished those moments of peace and serenity she shared in the woods with only beasts and plants, far from the noisy turmoil of the world of men. Now, as it is always the case in fairy tales, something unexpected will come knocking at her door, and here is what: only a few days after she turned twenty-two, by a warm summer evening, she intended to go on one of her countless strolls in the forest and, after she had told her parents of her whereabouts, she went away, following the usual lane that would quickly take her to the heart of the woods, where the sun seldom shone and the birds seldom sang. Once there, she wandered to and fro amidst the bloom, tip-toeing childishly on the grass, humming little tunes of her own invention until, all of a sudden, she shrieked with terror and leaped back with dread: she had set her foot on something particularly disgusting, slimy and cold, which happened, as she noticed with a quick glance on the ground where her foot had stood a second before, to be a toad, a massive, greenish and particularly placid toad.
'Eww' she said aloud.
'Well, the sole of your foot isn't a particularly enjoyable contact either, if you ask me.'
'Wait a minute...Who just spoke? Is there someone here?'
'Yes there is girl, and you almost smashed them.'
She looked down at the frog, bewildered, her eyes wide open with amazement and fear.
'Oh my god, that's it, I've gone crazy, I hear voices.'
'No you're not. This is just me to talking to you.'
'But...You're a frog. Frogs cannot talk. Frogs just...do noises and that's it.'
'Well, there are more things in heaven and earth, young girl, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.'
'Now you're quoting Shakespeare...'
'Why not? Can't a toad enjoy good literature?'
'Do all the toads speak? Or is just you?'
'I know not.'
'Wait a minute...Does it mean that you can speak human or that I can understand frog?'
'Once again, a fairly good question my dear, which I, unfortunately, cannot answer either. Does it really matter, though?'
'You're right...I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude of anything but from my point of view, this is pretty disturbing to chat with a frog, you can understand that.'
'I sure do.' The toad kept staring at her with his large dark unblinking eyes and it took her a while to process the idea that she was, indeed, talking to him.
'I hope I didn't hurt you. If I did, please accept my apologies, I surely didn't mean to, I didn't see you there in the grass.'
'Don't worry about it, us frogs have a pretty solid skin. I may wake up tomorrow with a nasty headache but that'd be all.'
'Is there any way I can make it up to you? Help you with something maybe?'
'As a matter of fact, there might be indeed.'
'Please tell me.'
'Alright, here's the thing. You may not be familiar with the way frogs are born and raised but, to keep it simple, once we're out in the water, we're on our own. There's no one to teach us the ways of life and these sorts of thing, and we have to manage by ourselves.'
'That's terrible...'
'That's the way it is. Who am I to question Mother Nature's work?' Anyways, this being said, once we reach adulthood, we may be lacking some skills, abilities if you will.'
'Such as?'
'Well, I cannot speak for the others but as far as I'm concerned, I might be a little behind as regards social interaction.'
'I don't know if it means anything, and after all you're the only frog I've ever have a discussion with, but you seem to be a pretty witty and entertaining one to me.'
'That's very kind of you...Oh, I don't know your name yet.'
'My bad, I'm forgetting my manners. I'm Titania. Do you have a name?'
'They call me Grymm.'
'Well, Grymm, what exactly would you like my help for?'
'There's...someone that I've been seeing in these parts for quite a while now, and though I'd really like to get to know her, I don't feel like I could do something about it, so maybe if you gave me a few tips, a little lore about how to proceed in these matters, I might finally be able to take a step forward.'
'I see, it's romance we're dealing with here, so to speak.'
'We can call it that, yes.'
'What do you know about her?'
'Not much, I'm afraid. Just that, like me, she spends a lot of time in these woods. I don't think she ever saw me, as you can now testify by yourself I'm not very noticeable.'
'That's a start. Well, since I promised to, I will do my best to teach you what I know, which is not much I'd rather tell you, and try to help you finally make contact with that sweetheart of yours.'
'That would be great, thank you.'
'It's getting late, I should go back home, but let's meet here tomorrow at sunset.'
'I'll be there.'

And thus, as the moon grew brighter above the tree tops, a covenant was made between that young girl and the frog. The day after, she came as promised and started to explain to him the ways of the world in the matter of love for, she thought, what applied to humans probably applied to toads as well. And from that day on, every single evening, she would come to the heart of the forest and meet Grymm, and they would talk for hours and they would also shared a lot and get to know each other. That peculiar teaching went on for two weeks, until one day, as they were about to say goodbye after another lesson, she said to him:
'Well, Grymm my little friend, I think our little agreement has come to an end, you know now as much as I do on this particular subject. I wish you all the luck and courage in the world and I sincerely hope things will work out between you and your mysterious lover. I hope my little teachings will help you.'
'They will, more than you think. Goodbye Titania, maybe we'll meet again someday.'
'Goodbye Grymm and again, good luck.'
And as she departed, he stood there, staring at her, silent.

Later that night, Titania was lying on her bed, thinking about the whole odd adventure she had just lived, and wishing that Grymm would find the happiness he deserved, for she had learnt to like that little creature. And as she did so, not far from there, in the depths of the woods, sitting alone in a moonlit glade, stood Grymm the toad, and as his black eyes gazed into the stars, he whispered those words, not to anyone but to myself:
' I am sorry Titania, since I now know your name, but I don't think your help, as precious and enjoyable as it was, will be enough. However, I cannot thank you enough, for I do know her much better now...