Assumption School beset by resignations and discord

The Rev. Paul M LaPalme, pastor at St. Brigid Catholic Church in Millbury, in August 2010.

MILLBURY — More than half of the teaching staff has resigned and some parents say they will take their children out of Assumption School after what they describe as "intimidation and bullying" by the new administration.

"Father Paul is all — and don't you forget it."

That is the mantra some parents say the Rev. Paul M. LaPalme uses when entering classrooms and addressing staff and students.

New to administration, he took the headmaster post in the small parochial school that served about 190 students last year, alongside new Principal Joan Matys. He is also pastor at St. Brigid Church in Millbury.

A few weeks ago, six out of the 10 teachers signed a letter of resignation and sent it to Rev. LaPalme after months of what they called bullying and harassment.

They had reached an impasse and said they felt they had no alternative after Rev. LaPalme allegedly refused to meet with them three times with a mediator. They said they received no response from Bishop Robert J. McManus, head of the Worcester Diocese, after sending him a letter about their concerns.

The bishop's office asked Superintendent Delma Josephson to handle the situation. But she has no jurisdiction over a diocesan school run by a parish.

The teachers say they felt they had no recourse.

On Aug. 4, they sent an email to Rev. LaPalme notifying him of their decision to resign.

Former Pre-K teacher Patricia Martin-Smith, of Worcester, who taught at the school 15 years, said leaving the school was one of the hardest decisions she has ever made.

"It was heartbreaking," she said, crying. "We love those kids and that school."

At a meeting with four of the teachers who resigned, the women said Rev. LaPalme and the principal routinely belittled and intimidated them.

"We felt we were working in a hostile, intimidating work environment," Ms. Martin-Smith said. "We sent a letter to the bishop (on July 9) and he couldn't be bothered with even making a phone call that says, 'I got your letter'?"

The women described one ordeal after another that culminated with Rev. LaPalme "chastising" the women in a mandatory faculty meeting in a kindergarten classroom after school on May 17 that was called at the last minute. The women were told not to speak or ask questions, they said, and after Rev. LaPalme chastised them for 15 minutes, they were allegedly "forced" to hug him before they could leave the room.

During a 15-minute encounter, the women said Rev. LaPalme questioned their faith and the reasons they became Catholic school teachers. The women said they felt they were being disciplined because they were upset over Rev. LaPalme letting go a volunteer who had worked at the school for 30 years without giving her any explanation. They said they were later told by the principal that Rev. LaPalme wanted to come at them with "fire and brimstone" at that meeting.

"Teachers were not allowed to speak during this meeting and all of us were forced to hug him on our way out the door," Ms. Martin-Smith said. "He finished by saying that we should go home and 'reflect' about why we became Catholic school teachers and why we were at Assumption School … Upon exiting the kindergarten classroom, he insisted that every teacher exit through the door where he was standing and give him a mandatory hug. The only thought I had in my head was that I had to get out of this room. I was totally shocked. After chastising us for 15 minutes, now he is giving me a hug?"

Rev. LaPalme said he had little interaction with staff in the school and the issues with the teachers who resigned was just a matter of personality differences. He said he did not feel it was necessary to comply with their requests to meet with him with a mediator present.

"I invited them to meet with me directly," he said. "I had no reason for a mediator. If I have to meet with my teachers with a mediator, I don't know what kind of relationship they have with me."

As far as the "mandatory" hug is concerned, he said they could have refused to do it, just like a person can refuse to shake the hand of someone who extends it for a handshake.

"When the meeting ended I wanted to say goodbye to all of them," he said. "I'm not in charge of their feelings. No one has to do anything. I'm not forcing anyone to do anything of any sort. I wanted them all to leave the same way, see them all and say goodbye to them."

Southbridge resident Christine A. Milner, a former nun who taught at the school for two years, said when Rev. LaPalme heard the women might be resigning, he called all of them.

"I told him I felt very strongly that we need a mediator present — that communication had broken down," she said. "A third party guarantees both parties are heard."

At a Monday morning staff meeting where at least 10 women, including the principal, were present, the women said Rev. LaPalme entered the room and said, "There is too much estrogen in here for me," scoffed at them, and walked out.

Ms. Milner described another incident where she was deeply offended when Rev. LaPalme implied the teachers should be subservient and not ask questions, shortly after Pope Benedict XVI resigned. She said Rev. LaPalme commented during a meeting with eight staff members in the room, "I want you to know he has chosen the better path. He put himself in a monastery of nuns who have taken the vow of silence and who are on their knees every day," and then left the room.

"I was very offended — I didn't know what to say," Ms. Milner said.

Parents, too, say they have concerns and around a dozen families so far have pulled their children out of the school. They have created a Facebook page where they share concerns.

Scott J. Perkins, of South Grafton, who was on an eighth grade Memorial Day weekend trip to Quebec with his wife and 14-year-old daughter who graduated from Assumption this year, said, "I heard him say on the bus, 'God knew what he was doing when he gave me the vocation to priesthood. I don't like children. I don't have any patience for them.' "

"I actually almost got up. If that is how he feels about kids in general, he should not have been on the bus at all. How can he be the headmaster of a school if he doesn't have patience for children?"

He said he would have pulled his daughter out if she hadn't already graduated.

"There is a lot of secrecy. He doesn't want anyone outside the school to know what is happening. He wants people working for him not to question his authority or why he is doing things."

Parent Sarah E. Milner-Hiser, who pulled her 10-year-old daughter out of the school, said she also took issue with children hearing the repeated phrase, "Paul is all."

Ms. Milner-Hiser, whose mother was among the teachers who quit, said, "My mother was told she had no honor (by Rev. LaPalme) and didn't abide by her contract."

However, the teachers said they did not receive their contracts within the time frame specified within the contract and feel they were invalid.

"These are not women who make big money. For them to make this decision was very difficult. The diocese had a chance to stand behind them and support the families and children of a small, parochial school that had been thriving with a very special atmosphere, but they chose to stand behind one man who had only been there a year with no administrative experience.

"My mother has been a religious educator for almost 40 years and was a Catholic nun for seven years," she said. "He has absolutely no respect for them and didn't treat them with dignity. He said it is his school and 'Paul is all.' "

Assumption alumni Paul A. Morana, 25, of Worcester, and his younger brother signed a letter along with more than 90 other alumni and parents addressed to Bishop McManus asking for answers to the "current crisis" at the school.

Mr. Morana said they are representing more than 200 alumni and parents — some of whom were scared to sign the letter out of fear of repercussions. The letter, sent by certified mail on Aug. 14 to the bishop's office, the superintendent and Assumption School, states it is the group's intent to investigate the breakdown in communication that led to the faculty's resignation and ensure that similar incidents do not occur in the future.

Raymond L. Delisle, spokesman for the Diocese of Worcester, said Bishop McManus is away this week, but the bishop believed there was an ongoing dialogue between the teachers, superintendent and Rev. LaPalme before they resigned.

Though authority over the school and Rev. LaPalme ultimately lies with the bishop, Mr. Delisle said, the superintendent has the ability to assist his office with issues at the school.

Additionally, he said Rev. LaPalme met with parents to discuss their concerns.

Superintendent Josephson said she tried to set up meetings between Rev. LaPalme and the teachers, but Rev. LaPalme refused to meet with them with Mrs. Josephson in the room, as teachers requested.

She said it was unfortunate communication broke down and the teachers decided to "break" their contracts, but they have been replaced with "highly qualified" staff and administrators are looking forward to the upcoming school year.

Both she and Rev. LaPalme said they did not have an accurate number of how many children were pulled out of the school.

Furthermore, Rev. LaPalme said he had "absolutely no recollection" of allegedly making some of the derogatory and demeaning comments including saying he had no patience for children.

As far as "Paul is all"?

"That makes me laugh," Rev LaPalme said. "If I said anything like that, you can be assured I said it in a joking, fun manner."

Contact Paula Owen at powen@telegram.com. Follow her on Twitter @PaulaOwenTG.