In this unexpected parenting video on tough love in a parking lot, Terrell Crawford, shows us how he handles the temper tantrum of his 3 year-old daughter Ari.

It’s encouraging to see this young father tackle his upset child’s attitude in such a matter-of-fact, relaxed and warm manner. He doesn’t bargain with his child, demand or bribe or yell. He talks to her calmly and leads her with warmth and firmness.

It is the style of parenting, rather than income or social background, that determines strength of character.

[Note: I’m not a fan of crude language, no matter how mild, but this video still holds great lessons.]

It was successful with whoever employed it, but this style was most common with married parents

Breastfeeding until six months had a positive impact on developing character

Character strengths are becoming more vital as the culture increasingly more challenging ie. skills such as empathy and self-regulation were 33 times more important in determining income for those who turned 30 in 2000 than for those born just 12 years earlier

Failure comes from lack of consistency

Tough love with warmth succeeds

because it builds up the child

the child learns to be restrained and respectful when it is modeled by their parent

The ‘tough’ part of the equation is about children realizing ‘we can’t have exactly what we want immediately when we want it’, and the recognition that there are other people in the world who you have to treat with a certain amount of respect. That is a crucial life skill, because no one wants to be married to or work with someone who is a self-centered. (source)

“Tough love teaches parents to face the crisis, take a stand, ask for cooperation and meet challenges. Tough love will help parents to develop new strengths so they can give a young person a sense of direction and support.” (source)

Tough love is about not giving in to a pestering or whining child. Parents knows that’s a super-hard thing to do consistently. A pestering child makes for an awful day, but parents consistently doing the right thing also makes for a better future. Kids live in the short-term. The day by day process of raising a child well is partly about raising children to look beyond the next minute, hour or week.

Don’t Be Afraid To Use Tough Love

Set the limits. Kids need limits to grow happy and healthy! Think of what is GOOD for them- not what they WANT/DON’T WANT.

Teach them social skills like complimenting, compromising, using ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and turn-taking through roughhousing!

Terrell Crawford in the video later summed up his parenting style as, “Work first, earn your play later, then deserve to be spoiled.”

“Train up a child in the way he should go; Even when he is old he will not depart from it.” ~Proverbs 22:6

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Thanks for sharing the video of the dad calming his three year old daughter having a tantrum. That little girl knows she is loved because her father took the time to discipline her in a calm way. She knows where the walls are and she will not ever have to wonder how to act.

Thanks for sharing the video of the dad calming his three year old daughter having a tantrum. That little girl knows she is loved because her father took the time to discipline her in a calm way. She knows where the walls are and she will not ever have to wonder how to act.

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