Part I – Feb 1st is my (New) New Year

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Jason here. It has been a while since I have written anything of magnitude. I have written and re-written this blog post at least 15 times. But I have to honest, its been tough. I have even referred to it as a “dark time”. I’m sure many of you would ask or even wonder, “What the hell are you talking about?!??” You just lost all that weight and you were on TV, and I could go on and on.

Hind sight is 20/20 or so they say. First off let me address the elephant in the room. (Fighting everything in me to not include a self-deprecating joke). Yes I have gained weight back. Everyone after the show has gained weight back. Some more or less than others. Honestly that’s not the worst part. Let’s just say life is tough to adjust to after living so “extreme” for a year. But I’m not going to point fingers (although I easily could) into some of the dark corners of making a reality show like ours. Only because there are so many good people that we met as part of the show. Also I don’t want to confuse Chris and Heidi as part of the problem. They are cast members just like we were. You could not ask for two nicer, more helpful people. If there is anyone who understands everything about living healthy, it’s Chris and Heidi. So maybe one day when I am feeling up to it I will delve into the depths of reality TV from a cast member perspective but out of respect for the few people in “production” that really are good people, I won’t.

As for me we have new traditions around here. New Years Day is always Jan 1. However for us February 1st is our New Years Day. That’s when I get my head on straight and realize the need to recover from the pre and post holidays. This year is different though. I need to fix many things. I have referred to myself as “broken” to those who know me well enough. Finding a balance has been a nightmare. I only know extreme’s. I know extremely unhealthy lifestyle and extremely healthy lifestyle. Trust me when I say both are bad. When I say broken I mean physically, mentally and spiritually. But enough of that. That again is for another blog post. I’m working on fixing things. Only took me 6 months to come around but here I am. So lets start with #1 of the big three.

“Physical Repairs”

I’m going to be honest. I hate working out. I’m one of those people who just doesn’t enjoy it. There is a big difference between working out and activity though. I enjoy flag football, hiking, swimming and even snow blowing as of late. (we have a big driveway) that don’t remind me of working out. Those are fun activities. However we don’t always have time for that in life. So unfortunately I have to work out. Which for me with my travel schedule and a very rough winter has been limited. Most of the time I am stuck in a hotel gym on a god awful treadmill. However with Feb 1 bringing a new year I signed up for a ton of sessions with a personal trainer.

Sean McHugh is a retired College and NFL player (won a World Bowl and Super Bowl!). He played for the Lions for a short stint then went to play for the Steelers the year they won Super Bowl XLIII. Now he is also my personal trainer. You want to talk about intimidating. But he knows what he is doing and already has me figured out. We had our first workout on Monday and here is what it looked like:

1 Minute of work 30 seconds of rest with 3 rounds and a two minute break between rounds:

Dumbbell curl then press then squat to burpee

Walking Lunges with weight overhead

Chest press with legs off the ground

Arms raised switch jumping lunges

Yoga Ball shoulder presses

Ball Slams

“Drive the car” Tricep work on incline bench

Agility Ladder alternate jumps

After 6 months of being what I would call out of shape it was a rough workout. One of the roughest. I grunted and shook and everything in between, but I survived. Sean is tough but I trust he knows what he is doing. He already figured out that my issue is mental. If he watched the show he would already know that.

My plan will be to meet with Sean two days a week for an hour and in between I will be walking and making sure I get activity in during the day. My Treadmill desk has been in the garage where it is too cold to workout but I think I am going to move it in my office I really need that extra movement right now.

I have three physical goals now. First is I need to take off these 50 pounds I put back on. Yes its 50 pounds. The second is once I do take the weight off I want to work on strength training. I really loved weight lifting / strength training. I really want to get strong enough to participate in an actual meet. I follow this amazing group on Facebook called Detroit Barbell and would love to join up. The third is I would like to get one last plastic surgery procedure done. (more about that one when we talk about mental repairs.)

By the end of the week all of these will be out….be gentle..this took a lot for me to write.

First of all, I am sorry you are having troubles, but I do have to say I am disappointed in you. Not that you have gained weight back, but because of the way you are speaking so derisively about the show that gave you such an opportunity, as well as the overall negativity. So many people would have loved to have that time with Chris-to turn their lives around. Not just to lose the weight themselves, but to inspire others, and possibly use the celebrity status to better their life, and that of their family.
I really hope working with this new trainer helps you, but remember: if YOU don’t want the change, no one can want it for you. It’s a lifestyle.
Good luck.

Jenny is it, You need to read a bit more closely. I would never disparage Chris & Heidi. They are awesome as I said in my post. But again you have to separate them from the show itself. And nobody gave me anything, I earned and worked for everything I have in my life, including the show. But until you have ever participated in that experience you’re speaking from a place of unknown. Maybe in a future post you will understand. But if you knew what we were subjected to by some members of production. Which does not include Chris, Heidi or the very kind people that were a part of production. If you knew, you would not be so disappointed. Lastly I don’t desire nor ever have wanted celebrity status. Sounds like maybe you do. And that really is ok. But for me I don’t need to be a “celebrity” which by the way being on a two hour show hardly qualifies. I guess until you went through what few of us had, you would know. My blog is therapeutic for me. You’re welcome to not read it.

Jason-
I didn’t say you spoke about Chris or Heidi that way. However, Chris and the shows producers DID give you the awesome opportunity of being on the tv show, which you had to know would make you a “celebrity”, no matter what you think, people DO see you as one – They tuned in to see your struggles, to root with you, and anxiously awaited the outcome of your transformation. If that isn’t being a “celebrity” to you, that’s fine. I, however do not want to be one, which is why I work on my own fitness goals at home instead of on TV, subjecting myself to both praise and criticism from people who watch the show and who are inspired by the stories.
I’m trying to show you a viewpoint of someone who was excited by your families story, and then let down by the tone of this post, but if all you wanted to hear is praise, then I’m sorry that my trying to show you another outlook upset you. Since you’re not looking for honest opinions and feedback, I’ll take your advice.
I wish you well and really hope you can see how the opportunity you were given could change your life for the better. Good luck in your future endeavors.

Jason,
Your post was very heartfelt and I’m sure it was very difficult to write and open yourself up to others opinions when they don’t walk in your shoes.
Praying for you and your family to find balance and peace.

I’m glad you are writing these. Many people just drop off when they struggle, instead of acknowledging it. I have gone through a few months I consider dark lately, where I fell off fitness & spiritually, funny how it all connects somehow. I am regrasping, and again, it seems to be coming back together insync as well. reading your struggles makes me feel like i’m not alone. Thank you

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