Monday, April 26, 2010

F1: 2010 Chinese GP highlights

Round 4 of 19(Shanghai China: April 18, 2010)

Whale I have to admit that I was somewhat preoccupied upon watching le Memorex the first time Sunday morning and simply couldn’t remember everything that had occurred... So I did what I rarely do and just watched the tape a second time to see if BLOODY ‘OL ‘JENSE WON AGAIN?

I have to say that I found SPEED’s elder Statesman ‘HOBBO, nee David Hobbs to be absolutely brilliant over the weekend... First describing Sebastian Buemi’s “MEGA” double front wheel failure as a Steering input issue... SHEISA! That was a Monstrous looking accident which has now been noted by the Team as a double Front Suspension Upright failure, (UH DUH!) as thankfully NOBODY was injured from the runaway tyres, one which went into a Grandstand and the other which actually hit a Television camera; Aye Karumba!

And I’ve just read how the right upright simply snapped and then milliseconds later the massive loads transferred across the chassis and caused the left upright to break, as apparently the new batch of Aluminum parts were machined just a tad too thin in the never ending search to remove weight...

Then Hobbs continued on eloquently in the “Qualie” Show buildup by interjecting when Professor (Steve) Matchett noted that Messer Vitaly Petrov had trouble bringing the R30 back to the Pits... Hobbs immediately said “Brought it back on the Truck!” As Petrov lost control over the rumble strips and instantly performed a Wall Smack...

And I have to say that the race was truly chaotic as the first 10 laps seemed like a lifetime with all of the changing weather conditions, as I felt worn out simply from the cozy confines of my Lazy Boy recliner... Although I have to say the part of the race I enjoyed the most was the Battle Royale’s Herr Schumacher put on with his much younger adversaries, as Lewis Hamilton politely claimed that was the most aggressive battle he’d ever had with somebody! And ‘Ol Schuey sure didn’t show any ‘LUV for his ex-teammate Felipe Massa when giving him the patented Schuey-Swerve over P9! Effectively running the Brazilian off track, which the announcers were uber-quick to point out, was shades ‘O Magny Cours, circa ’04 with ex-Bosom buddy ‘DC. (David Coulthard)

And amazingly Williams Nico Hulkenberg pitted the most with six trips to change back “N forth between tyres, with Alonso, Trulli and another all making five trips apiece...

Race Drive of ChinaThis race pick seems Obvious to me, SNAP! Oh Never Mind! But I have to say that I was overly impressed by the young “Rooskie’s” drive, first having stayed out on “Slicks” during the spitting rain and playing a dutiful wingman to Team leader Robert Kubica... As the “Reggie” duo ran continuously in P3-P4 behind the Big Guns of Mercedes ‘N McLaren. Then having made another Pitstop for Intermediate rubber, Vitaly dusted off the likes of the Toro Rosso, Ferrari ‘N others... Then finding himself 15 seconds behind DER TERMINATOR, nee M. Schumacher, who had an abysmal day by his “Rainmeister” reputation... Vitaly not only overtook Messer Schumacher in only his fourth ever Grand Prix, but also passed the vastly experienced Mark Webber, notoriously difficult to overtake who’d made two more Pitstops then the Russian! And thus my pick easily goes to Renault’s Vitaly Petrov for scoring his maiden Grand Prix points with a fine seventh place finish.

McLarenWhale it seems that “JENSE once again got the better of his exalted teammate “JAGUAR,” who seemingly has more pace then Button, yet Hamilton is also apparently harsher upon his equipment, especially those majik black ring thingy’s... As I still don’t know if it’s “Code” for Team Orders when ‘JAGUAR radios the Pits his tyre is Bald or just trying to Cover his “Derriere?” (ARSE!) As Button made two fewer Pit stops to Hamilton; 2-4 and thus managed to hold on for his second victory of the year.

MercedesSPEED’s Bob Varsha pointed out that by Nico Rosberg leading the race, it was the first time since Italy, 1955 that Mercedes GP had led a race... Even if Rosberg’s lead was due to tyre strategy, the young Nico sure seems to have the upper hand over his Seven Time World Champion teammate Michael Schumacher... Who simply seemed somewhat out of his element, having pitted for fresh rubber more times then Rosberg who managed to survive with his thrashed Intermediate’s and claim his second Podium of the season, vaulting him to second in the Drivers Championship while Michael’s lowly tenth place finish matches his total of 10 points for the season to date.

Red BullWhale I really don’t know what happened to the Red bull duo as Master ‘Zebb seemed to be the consensus pick for victory after his third Pole Position of the year... While Webber was alongside in P2 and thus you’d expect them to run off and hide from the rest of the pack, eh? Yet I can only surmise that they got their tyre strategies wrong by not staying out at the beginning and thus seemingly wandered ‘round in the middle of the front grouping the rest of the day, although Vettel did seem to get a bit ‘Nerfed by Hamilton in the Pit lane, along with both Drivers having damaged Front Wing endplates from separate skirmishes... And Vettel seemed to momentarily lose his cool when pressured in Post-race interviews over his Pit lane follies...

No. 5) S. Vettel: Q) Pole; R) 6thNo. 6) M. Webber: Q) 2nd; R) 8th

Name Q RVettel 3 3Webber 1 1

FerrariFredrico Suave, a.k.a Fred Alonso made a blistering start which video replays later showed the Spaniard immediately getting the crooked finger of the FIA’s “Darth Whiting,” (Charlie) Technical Director denoting that the Ferrari had jumped the start to which Alonso was given a Drive-thru penalty... And Alonso certainly didn’t gain any ‘LUV with teammate Massa when giving him a ‘LUV-Tap entering Pit lane in order to be first in between the two Scuderia Piloto’s. So Fernando’s fourth place was impressive, yet I enjoyed Massa’s tussle with Schumacher more, although I’m guessing Felipe didn’t? Before ultimately getting around the German for ninth place...

No. 7) F. Massa: Q) 7th; R) 9thNo. 8) F. Alonso: Q) 3rd; R) 4th

Name Q RMassa 1 2Alonso 3 2

2010 NewBoyzOnce again it seems little was said ‘bout the inherent “Back markers,” other than how I enjoy David Hobbs continuously mentioning how the in-season testing ban effects their chances of improving, noting look how long it took force India to get it’s act together... To which Steve Matchett quickly chimed in; “All the way back to the Jordan Days!”

LotusYou have to say it was refreshing to see “KOVY’s” Lotus up in the Top Ten at the start of the race, as I’d assume the Finn was putting his Nordic driving skills to good use, eh? As Kovalainen battled with the “Superior” Williams all race long and finished a fine 14th place while once again the not-so “Scrumptious” ‘Juan, (Jarno Trulli) retired once again with Hydraulics issues.

Hispania RacingInterestingly, Toro Rosso’s Jaime Alguersuari stated in his Post-race notes that a Hispania was weaving back ‘N forth after having been shown the Blue (Move over) Flag and hence zigzagged back into his path when he rammed Bruno Senna and lost his Front wing...

Nevertheless, “The Little Team that Could!” Completed its second Double Car finish, as interestingly Senna noted that he’d chosen a (Helmet) visor that was a tad bit too DARK for the weather conditions, while Chandhok started from Pit lane after the Team made last minute Hydraulics changes; so a very good day for the duo in their second wet race of the year.

Virgin RacingHaving just watched the tape a second time, I know that Timo Glock started from Pit lane in what now seems to be an attempt to fix his faltering “Cossie” lump, which the Team was unable to do, while the Virgin squad also had attempted a clutch repair upon Di Grassi’s mount prior to the start which also ultimately failed... Yet I appreciate how Nick Wirth seems to be the most forthcoming of the NewBoyz Trio of Technical Directors... NOT sugar coating the Team’s expected teething issues and actually telling us what the cars failures were... As Glock suffered from an apparent Pneumatic valve bottle supply issue, having sprung a leak somewhere, with Di Grassi having reoccurring clutch issues...