Assorted Stupidity #78

August 4, 2015

Number of lawsuits filed during 2014 in the U.S. District Court in Tucson: 3,772. Number of those lawsuits filed by Dale Maisano: 2,995 (79.4 percent). Number of lawsuits Maisano has filed in the District of Tennessee: over 1,800. Most lawsuits Maisano has filed in one day: 249. Total number he has filed (estimated): over 6,000. Number in which he has prevailed: zero. Year his sentence for aggravated assault will end: 2021.

Number of Australian men arrested in 2015 for playing a trumpet while driving: one (to date). Number of hands needed to play the trumpet: two. Number of hands left over for driving: zero. Number of Australian dollars the driver will have to pay for careless driving: 354.

Update: Number of minutes spent by me researching trumpet-playing last night: zero. Number of readers who have already pointed out that it does not take two hands to play the trumpet: two. Number it actually takes: zero. Chance that the man mentioned above (who was reportedly swerving all over the road) was this talented: also zero.

Number of breasts possessed by Ng Lai-ying: two. Number she allegedly used to “assault” a police officer in Hong Kong during a protest in March: one. Number of days in the prison sentence she received last week for that offense: 105. Number of people who protested her conviction on Sunday by wearing or waving bras outside police headquarters: about 200.

Days Dominique Rondeau spent in jail after his arrest for allegedly throwing a snowball at a police car in Detroit: 40. Number of witnesses: zero. Number of officers who arrested him after watching a security video of the incident: two. Number of those officers who could identify him on the video in court: zero. Number of lawsuits filed by family for malicious prosecution: one.

Number of cents in Curtis Jackson’s rap name: 50. Estimated net worth in May, according to Forbes: $155 million. Number of cents he now claims to have: zero. Amount of judgment in Leviston v. Jackson, in which the plaintiff accused Jackson of posting a sex tape online in an effort to embarrass her ex-boyfriend: $5 million. Days elapsed between verdict and Jackson’s bankruptcy filing: three.