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Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Canseco-Scorpions Experience Off To A Strange/Hilarious Start

Jose and Ozzie Canseco made their Yuma Scorpions debut Tuesday in a doubleheader against the Calgary Vipers, and the calamities which followed could only be described as exactly what everyone expected.

Ozzie, who famously singled off Bruce Hurst in 1992, strained his quadriceps in the fifth inning of game one trying to beat out an infield hit.

"I was just hustling down the line," Ozzie said. "Just wanted to make sure I made a good example in terms of hustling on a ground ball."

The Cansecos: setting good examples since the fifth inning of Tuesday's game.

Of course, a game in which Ozzie Canseco gets hurt would not be complete without Jose Canseco also getting hurt. Jose left game two with a biceps strain, presumably from swatting away the talking butterfly circling his head.

"We'll see how it is tomorrow," Jose said. "It felt like a sharp knife went in there or something. Hopefully it's a bad strain or a pull."

Hopefully.

Jose and his coaching staff-a clipboard named "Clippy" and a drawing of a hippo-also made an error before the games even started, forgetting to write pitcher J.J. Leaper's name on the lineup card. When Canseco tried to put Leaper in the game in the fourth inning, umpires pulled Canseco's pants down and sprayed him with a mayonnaise hose. Well, actually that's what I would've done if I was the umpire. The real umpire ruled Leaper ineligible to pitch.

"I was in shock, saying, 'OK, this can't be happening,'" said Jose. "Hopefully, this doesn't happen again."