Mister Small: Hmph. You should tell that to the last boy who sat there and lied to me. He's there now!

Darwin: The prison!?

Mister Small: No, next to it.

Gumball: The cemetery!? What happened to him?

Mister Small: He just works there.

Gumball and Darwin: [relieved sigh]

Mister Small: Now, let me show you something. [rummages around in his cabinet, he takes out a small hat and blows on it] This, is the lying hat. Now, watch what happens when I put it on. Your mother called!

Gumball and Darwin: Oh!

Mister Small: She says she hates you!

Gumball: [gasp, tearfully] She does?

Darwin: [glass breaking] I think my heart just broke.

Mister Small: It's okay kids, that was a lie.

Gumball and Darwin: [relieved sigh]

Mister Small: But you see, that's what a lie will do! Hurt your feelings. She hates you!

Gumball and Darwin: Aww.

Mister Small: She loves you.

Gumball and Darwin: Yay!

Mister Small: Hates you!

Gumball and Darwin: Aww.

Mister Small: Loves you.

Gumball and Darwin: Yay!

[he continues to ask this until their voices become so fast that they're indistinguishable, Gumball and Darwin start breathing heavily afterwards]

Mister Small: So, what have we learned today?

Darwin: Never trust a man in a hat.

Mister Small: Yes, but what else?

Gumball and Darwin: Uhh...

Mister Small: Honesty is the best policy!

Gumball and Darwin: Oh.

Mister Small: Say it!

Gumball and Darwin: Honesty is the best policy.

Mister Small: Good, and again!

Gumball and Darwin: Honesty is the best policy. Honesty is the best policy. Honesty is the best policy.

In Trouble Again

Principal Brown: Let's leave all this behind and go live on a desert island.

Miss Simian: But how would we survive?!

Principal Brown: On fruit, water, and love.

Miss Simian: Oh!

Gumball: [clears throat] Did you ask us in here for a reason?

Principal Brown: Yes, of course Watterson. I've been getting a lot of complaints, what on Earth's gotten into you?

Gumball: Principal Brown, can I be honest with you?

Principal Brown: I, er, uh,- yes.

Gumball: I can't help thinking that your relationship with Miss Simian could be compromising your professionalism.

Darwin: I completely agree Gumball, and frankly, I fear my education is suffering as a result.

Gumball: And besides Principal Brown, you can do so much better than that!

[Both Principal Brown and Miss Simian growl angrily at them]

Counseling Part 2

Mister Small: Okay, so you got honesty wrong. Perhaps we should try something else! I'd like you to meet a friend of mine. [rustles around in his filing cabinet] Uh, one second. [popping sounds, grunting sounds]

Mister Small: I'm here to explain that honesty's not all black and white, but, like my fur, it's more of a grey area. Grey. See that? Grey fur. Now, there are some things that are "too" honest, to say out loud.

Gumball: Honesty Bear, I'm confused, what can we be honest about?

Mister Small: Let me put this in a language you kids will understand, hippity rap!

Each individual case will require a specific judgement call depending on who you're talking to and the context of the conversation!

[Song ends]

Mister Small: Any questions? No? Excellent! Goodbye.[rudely shoves the two of them out the room]

Gumball: Hmm... Okay, I think I got it. You should always tell the truth unless you have to lie, but if you do lie you should tell the truth about it unless you're talking to someone who's lying because if they tell a lie and you tell the truth it'll be a lie because you were lying about telling the truth inside of a lie so the whole thing's a lie while still being true!

[Darwin's head explodes]

Post-Counseling pt 2

Gumball: [sigh] Man this truth and honesty thing is hard.

Principal Brown: Has anyone seen the nurse?! I think my head may be on fire. Is my head on fire?

Gumball: Umm, would it be a good thing or a bad thing if it was on fire?

Principal Brown: A bad thing of course!

Gumball and Darwin: It's not on fire.

Principal Brown: Oh! Hoho, whoo! For a minute there I thought my head was on fire. What a relief. So, how are things with you, Watterson?

Gumball: Uh! Yeah, uh, not bad. You?

Principal Brown: Pretty good. Pretty good. So, no more of that lying trouble I hope?

Gumball: But! [Darwin puts his fin on Gumball's mouth to show him that the Silence Snake is watching them, he stays silent.]

Conclusion

Doughnut Sheriff: Why won't you talk? Talk darn it, talk!

Nicole: Officer, there's clearly been some kind of misunderstanding.

Doughnut Sheriff: Well ma'm, looking at their rap sheet . It seems they're not first time offenders. Multiple accounts of antisocial behaviour, vandalizing school property, and setting your principal on fire!

Miss Simian: And all because you lied about your father eating your homework.

Richard: [falls on the floor and begins to sob] Okay! I did it! Take me away!

Synopsis

Plot

Miss Simian is taking up homework from the night before, but Gumball and Darwin don't have it. Darwin is scared that Miss Simian won't believe them, but Gumball tells him it will be fine. Once Miss Simian arrives at Gumball's desk, he tells her that his dad ate his homework, which she obviously doesn't believe, and sends them to Mr. Small's office to have him instruct them on how to be honest.

Mr. Small tells the boys that there is a dark abyss in their souls, but Gumball and Darwin insist that they aren't liars. Mr. Small then tells about the fate of the last person to lie to him in his office, he works at the local graveyard. Still not sure if the kids get the message, Mr. Small takes out a tiny hat and informs Gumball and Darwin that their mother called and said that she hates them. That was a lie of course, and Mr. Small continually teases them with it to the point where the kids decide that "Honesty is the best policy."

Later in the hallway, Gumball and Darwin tell their classmates brutally honest claims about them, including Tina Rex, which results in them being squashed by her foot. Now in the office for their classmates' complaining about their new found honesty, Gumball and Darwin question Principal Brown's relationship with Miss Simian, which obviously makes Mr. Brown and Miss Simian infuriated towards Gumball and Darwin.

In Mr. Small's office, he decides that teaching them to just be honest was a mistake and decides to teach them that sometimes telling little lies can be the best option. He does by donning a grey bear costume and telling the kids that honesty is more of a the colour of his fur than plain black and white. In an attempt to relate to the kids, he performs a "hippity rap" for them. Although, this only leaves Gumball and Darwin even more befuddled. Mr. Small, who is clearly tired of dealing with the two of them, rudely pushes them out the door.

In the hallway, Gumball attempts to explain white lies to Darwin, which severely confuses him, so much so that it makes his head literally explode. In the School Nurse's office, Gumball is apologizing to Darwin when Principal Brown bursts into the door, head aflame. He demands to know if his head is on fire or not, since for some reason he can't see, smell or feel it. Principal Brown of course says that it would be a bad thing if they were honest and told him his head was on fire, so they lie and tell him he is fine. Relieved, Principal Brown attempts to make small talk with them while the fire on his head spreads further, causing the sprinkler system to turn on.

A soaking wet Mr. Small is exasperated in his attempts to teach Gumball and Darwin about honesty, so in a last ditch attempt he brings out his secret weapon, The Silence Snake. Gumball and Darwin attempt to greet the Silence Snake, but it simply hisses at them with a loud "SILENCE!", which effectively shuts them up for the rest of the session. A smug Mr. Small relaxes in a suggestive pose, but he loses his balance and tumbles into the open drawer of the filing cabinet.
Mr. Small is in severe pain and tells Gumball and Darwin to find help, but the ever present Silence Snake is still watching them, causing Gumball and Darwin to remain mute.

The boys try to call the emergency services, but since the Silence Snake is still watching them, they say nothing, which makes the Doughnut Sheriff believe they're pulling a prank on them.
The boys decide to tell Principal Brown, but he misinterprets their gestures to mean Miss Simian's in trouble, that somehow makes him fall out a second story window. They run into Miss Simian, who was telling Rocky about her and Principal Brown's future plans, and do the same silent routine for her, which causes her to have the same reaction as Brown, but with him in place of her.

Gumball and Darwin encounter Rocky in the hallway, who finally understands what they were trying to tell Brown and Miss Simian, and lends them his crowbars before jumping out the window with the other faculty members.

Mr. Small is still struggling inside the filing cabinet, somehow making it move across the floor, when Gumball and Darwin rush inside. Unsure of what to do, they begin smashing the crowbars against the cabinet, which, of course, does nothing but cause Mr. Small more pain. Mr. Small then tells them what they should obviously be doing with the crowbars, trying to pry open the drawer of the cabinet. They try to, but their efforts only result in the cabinet collapsing onto the floor with Mr. Small still trapped inside.

Doughnut Sheriff bursts in the door, intending to catch the pranksters, but he instead sees Gumball, Darwin, and the room in shambles. He declares them to be vandals and takes them to the principal's office. Miss Simian, Nicole and Richard are waiting for them in the office along with Principal Brown. Doughnut Sheriff read off a list of offenses that Gumball and Darwin have committed, and Miss Simian adds that they lied about their homework being eaten by their father.

Everyone stares accusingly at Richard, who looks worried before confessing that he really did eat their homework, supposedly to gain it's knowledge.
Principal Brown dismisses them of all charges, but asks them if they knew where Mr. Small was, since he had been missing and all the evidence the found was a sock, the Silence Snake. Upon seeing the puppet, Gumball and Darwin get frightened and claim not to know what became of Mr. Small.

The episode ends with Rocky mopping up the hallway, with the panicked screams of Mr. Small, still trapped in the cabinet. Rocky dismisses it as nothing, and continues mopping elsewhere.

Trivia

Continuity

This is the first episode in which Darwin's head explodes. The second time was in "The Meddler".

Cultural References

Gumball and Darwin's pantomimes, and the resulting interpretations of it from Rocky, Miss Simian, and Principal Brown, are references to the quote "Timmy's in a well" commonly attributed to the television show Lassie. This is also a running gag.

Goofs/Errors

When Gumball and Darwin are attempting to pry open the locked filing cabinet with the crowbars, it begins to fall over so they drop them in surprise, but when the shot transitions, the crowbars are back in their hands.