I was referred for brain scans and tests and prescribed drugs after having a few grand mal/tonic clonic seizures. But found out I had many petit mal partial seizures.

They can affect me in different ways but don’t appear seizure like to anyone watching. I lose my ability to understand what I see. Or I lose my short term memory. Mostly. Or those are the ones I notice.

But due to a v negative effect to an SSRI prescribed during a career change ( which clashes with the autistically wired brain and made me insane! Almost literally), in 2009 I saw my neurologist and said I would like to go drug free because of the mid to long term side effects of drug treatment.

He agreed with me…and we had a long conversation about philosophy where he recommended I read 7 years in Tibet and I recommended he read the Bhagavhad Gita (seriously…there is something about aspers that’s refreshing to those who think spiritually or philosophically…I never expect to have a conversation about it but people feel they can talk on a level with me!).

Anyway. I’m tired tonight and worked a long day so I was busy telling my viewers about my henna mix (hair dye), when my TLE struck. It happens when I rush or when I relax. Light, noise and reading can aggravate it. So I take care to minimise risks. I take valerian root and wind down for a few hours before bed. Wear sunglasses in the bedroom etc.

But fluke of flukes, just had one when I was recording. This is interesting to me. I notice my hand goes to my head like it hurts. It doesn’t hurt. It feels like white noise explosion in the brain. But I don’t fall, I don’t slur, I don’t forget what I am saying even though I go off at a tangent. Most importantly, if I hadn’t told the viewers I was having one, you wouldn’t have known.

Which is why until I had a big seizure, no one knew I had epilepsy!

Listening back to it, I do notice I pause between words increasingly before I have the seizure. And in this tired state, I move my head a lot as if focusing my eyes is uncomfortable. Which it is. And which is usually my cue for a Hepburn treatment (oversized sunglasses indoors).

I am going to post this for epilepsy awareness. Epilepsy doesn’t carry the stignma it once did. For some reason people with aspergers are more likely than average to have epilepsy. Also, sometimes people grow in and out of it.

My autism and epilepsy would be considered disabilities by some. I don’t feel that way about them. Some people have stinky feet and cake addictions…far more debilitating! Also allergies…much worse. So I don’t consider my autism or my epilepsy as disability. Some people have bad manners…surely, that’s worse!

So, I am posting this up with the seizure included for people who don’t know about epilepsy (or henna). Not all epilepsy is grand mal seizures with thrashing about and blue lips. And not all petit mal seizures are the same! I can talk when mine happen but usually can’t see!

I could write more…but I don’t want to write a medical journal article. I just thought maybe it would be informative. If I have never seen myself have a partial seizure before, I expect most people haven’t seen me have one. So it’s sort of interesting…but also may help you understand a bit more about epilepsy in general.

Plus…anything about natural beauty products like henna powder and coconut oil are interesting in a whole different way! So there’s something for everyone!

And also, now you know why I wear sunglasses in the house at night. I am of course, that cool! But they serve a function too!

I thought I would do a blog about hair growing basics. By trial and error I have found a lot out about the best and worst things I can do for my own hair. And hopefully some of this information will be helpful to others. So this is a haircare tips blog specifically relating to colouring and growing your hair.

I will punctuate it with some photos. I’ve wandered thru the flat trying to find good lighting to get a photo of my freshly hennaed hair…it’s not easy! Of a dozen locations I think only two give any idea of my hair colour…with moodlights and fairylights everywhere it’s easy to get cool selfies in here…not easy to get ones of hair colour though. Also, henna really looks different in different light. In artificial light it can look bright red, in candlelight almost black – and in daylight somewhere in the middle. (Though being a nocturnal hermit type, no one sees it very much in daylight!)

Will post up some through this blog though so you get an idea can see how well conditioned my henna mix leaves my hair…and how it looks if left to dry naturally. Kind of wavy. V hippie, boho, preraphaelite – just how I like it!

In my henna mix…150g henna (my hair is v thick. Most people would only need to use 100g tops for hair my length). Two table spoons of sun in (the peroxide makes the henna stain v deep – I don’t use it every time but found lemon juice, which is used for the same, dried my hair badly but the tiny amount of peroxide in sun in didn’t. I would not recommend it to everyone but it works for me!). Two tablespoons of coconut oil. This moisturises and conditions and also makes it much easier to rinse the henna.

Henna is a powder and the mix is like making runny mud and covering your head in it. Then in plastic. Then a towel. Then leave it for 6 hours before washing it out. The henna makes your head v heavy so I tend to apply it to sections and wind them around each other at the front of my head (like my marie antoinette up do for curls in another blog; picture below shows the effect immediately after untwisting the antoinette up do – it settles down into waves and curls…v big hair!).

Some people complain that henna is so permanent. But that’s a good thing for me!

Some get purple or blueish tones if they over henna…I think mine is less prone to that because of the sun in used in my mix and also there a big sections of white hair now…the front right of my hair is totally white and you can see it is much more orange than the rest after henna! So over time mine is liable to become more yellowy red/orange and less bluey red because there will be more white.

It does mean I have to my roots regularly though…white roots with red hair makes it look like your hair fell out if you leave them! White or grey hair is a “cold” colour and contrasts with red very noticeably. Some people say their grey hair doesn’t take dye or henna at all. To them, I would recommend testing different acidic additions in their mix – wine, lemon juice etc – because that may help. If you’re not anti peroxide, you could also try my sun in mix but do be careful…some people’s hair reacts badly to peroxide – do proper strand tests before you use it all over your head!

Sometimes people report their hair changes texture – I am not really sure if mine has but it’s pretty strong and it’s had white bits that have spread since I was 15. But certainly post menopause women’s hair texture tends to change and you may need to adapt the way you care for it.

I am 42 now and for a long time I had very long hair – long enough to sit on – I never trimmed it but I never got split ends. I did henna it though and that improves the condition of your hair. The worst thing that ever happened to my hair was using serums and high performance conditioners. These eventually led to me cutting my hair shorter and shorter because I didn’t know why it was getting frizzy at the ends. The reason was…silicone. Some people can use it. Some can use it occasionally. I can’t use it at all. Silicone makes your hair look and feel softer by literally coating it. But that coating doesn’t necessarily come off with shampoo. And if it doesn’t, it essentially waterproofs your hair and you can’t moisturise or deep condition it. Look out for “cones” in your skincare products too. They can have a similar effect on your skin!

One thing I would mention though is that if you are growing your hair (and I am), when it reaches the length mine is now, it’s best to wear it up because the friction of the ends on your clothes can cause breakage and leave some people thinking their hair simply won’t grow past shoulder length. It gets easier to protect the longer it gets. When you can plait it or put it up v quickly with a stick, it’s a lot easier to manage than short hair.

Another problem can be friction from your pillow. Silk pillows will prevent that (also better for your face!) – but finding a comfortable way of wearing your hair in bed is a good idea. A very high pony tail that you plait is a good one – or two high pony tails because the weight of your hair needs to be distributed well so it doesn’t pull. If you wear tight pony tails you can actually end up with the hair thinning because it’s being pulled out. But what’s comfortable will vary depending on the position you sleep in. For example – if you sleep on your back two braids might be better. If your hair is heavy, a french plait might prevent pulling. I used to pull my bed 6″ from the wall and sleep with my hair hanging off the bed behind my pillow! My cat used to hide under the bed and play with it sometimes…that’s probably not good for your hair!

My plans for growing my hair out mean I use cone free products (Lush Rehab shampoo…and Lush conditioners – American Cream (contains lanolin), Veganese, Jungle or Happy Happy Joy Joy depending on how my hair is). Henna it and deep condition with coconut oil fortnightly. Have a silk pillow. Don’t use heat or styling products on it. Wear it up most of the time and especially if outside (sun, rain, wind…all can take a toll) or exercising.

So far, without any trims…it’s grown half an inch a month and has no split ends…and that’s after cutting it short 18 months ago. This meant none or my hair had been bleached, dyed or exposed to silicone…so I have a better idea of how my hair respond to being grown out. I have wrecked my hair several times from bleaching it too often and not knowing the perils of silicone and friction damage. We’ll see how it goes!

Notice the white streak before henna – about an inch back from the hairline & only visible if I part it just right & don’t henna for a month or so!

When hennaed notice extra shininess & multi tone effect…and how colour deepens from orange tones to deeper red as it oxidises for a couple of days.

My henna mix: BAQ henna powder, coconut oil, a spoonful of sun in (the low peroxide content opens cuticles so the henna takes well – I tried lemon juice but it always seemed to dry my hair so this works best for me).

The coconut oil means the henna rinses more easily and leaves less residue. My hair is left thoroughly moisturised & the consistency avoids dripping too!

(Very much better result from my mix than from Lush Caca Rouge – which I find drying, gritty and arduous to rinse).

I will review products individually in small blogs over the coming weeks. But before I do, I thought a little update.

As anyone who follows my blog is aware…I am v lazy. I rarely wear make up. I don’t wear foundation. I tend to keep a neat look by making sure my hair is hennaed and my roots are done and well conditioned. My eyelashes and eyebrows are tinted. My eyebrows are shaped and tidy. My lips are hydrated. My skin is hydrated. And I wear lipstains like Benetint or Posie Tint from Benefit usually, with a Burts Bees tinted lipbalm to top up. Or I used a revlon lipgloss/stain, applied it and wiped it off to leave a fuschia tint that didn’t look over done.

I’m 42. I don’t have much sun damage. I don’t really have lines. My skin is normal. Sometimes a bit dry in winter. I went through some hassle when I came off the pill five years ago and my skin got dry. Nothing seemed to work. I knew it would be hormonal and would balance out. I tried all kinds of creams and ended up with a rash from one and thought, that’s it. I will bite the bullet and try Creme de la Mer. Everyone raves about it. It can’t make this worse and I am wasting a fortune. (Note – I tried Lush’s Skin’s Shangri La at this time. Not cheap. It sorted the moisture but gave me clogged pores).

3 weeks later my skin was transformed to the point people thought I had, had something done. It appeared poreless. Spotless. Smooth. Moisturised. And I was amazed. Truly hadn’t expected a miracle despite the reviewers claims. But it was one!

Since then I have favoured La Mer moisturisers. The body cream, eye balm, moisturiser and lip balm. I also use the regenerating serum in the summer as a light alternative.

According to the PETA, La Mer, owned by Estee Lauder lost its cruelty free status a few years ago. This wasn’t due to anything La Mer or Lauder changed but rather a change in PETA categorisation. La Mer don’t test on animals. Their products are not made by people who do. La Mer is essentially cruelty free. But…they sell to China. And the Chinese test every skincare product they sell on animals.

So now a moral dilemma. Is La Mer cruelty free as it was until a few years back before being reclassified? Is is cruelty free when I buy it in the UK but not if I bought it in China. Or is it immoral for La Mer/Lauder to sell to China and we should boycott them by virtue of a lack of integrity? Or should we all lean heavily on China to stop their methods?

For me, my Stoptober experiment was interesting. I am recently full vegan (diet not lifestyle) after being mostly vegetarian since my teens. And I had used Lush products during my Stoptober experiment as I have enjoyed them since their Cosmetics to Go days.

Well. The second my experiment ended, I am back on La Mer. In a month it really wrecked my face. The Fun I used as body wash was great. And I liked the body lotions I used. Liked. They did give me soft skin. But in honesty…they weren’t user friendly. Not fast to absorb. Some better than others and my dry skin on my legs cleared up…but I was using argan oil all over before bed too (in place of bio oil).

Having to look into each product was interesting. Lush use some harsh foaming agents. They use laureth-4 which is not good for allergy prone skin. They do use some petroleum based additives…but the ingredients list on the labels is user friendly and the natural ingredients…all good. But the bad side? Being honest, the smells which seem such a treat when used occasionally, when used together create such a strong smell I couldn’t wear perfume all month because my hair smelled of vanilla, my body smelled of orange and patchouli after washing with something smelling citrusy and bathing in a sakura scented bath.

It got a bit much really. Especially because the body lotions (while effective) seemed to need a half hour sinking in period before dressing. Something I don’t have. So they may be good for before bed but daily use did become more time consuming than I am used to.

So for this month…a simple test…I will use the Lush bath stuff and washes as before. Herbalism and Ocean Salt for my face. But only La Mer body cream, argan oil, La Mer moisturiser and serum. And see how I go.

I can’t make a conclusion at all…these are hardly clinical trials. But I am starting to wonder if maybe the moisturising bath and shower stuff I was using left a detergent residue on my skin causing the dry patches…watch this space anyway!

Also, those who think Creme de la Mer is crazy expensive…£70 wasted on Lush face moisturisers that ruined my skin is worse. If you bought a bath bomb for each day of a month – about £3 a day that would cost you twice as much as using Creme de la Mer face moisturiser (a little goes a long way).

One thing I will quickly big up though! Lush’s lipsticks and eyeliners – versatile and work v much in the way I use Benetint/Posie Tint. I will definitely continue using their make up and hair care…by the end of November I will decide whether I will continue with their cleansers too!

So my subject to review conclusion at this point is…I think Lush and La Mer will work well together for me. I think my dry skin problems may have come from using Dove products that are too full of chemicals and slightly irritated my skin.

Also…my eyes have been opened to the fact that sometimes choices are based on what works best and others may choose based on company ethics. And right now, I am not sure where I stand on that.