Introduction The story of my love life from when I was fourteen in 2007 until I graduated highschool in 2011. I didn't go into as much detail as I could've with everything, as this would become a full-length novel if I tried to xD. I will update it every so often.

My freshman year of highschool, I had never had a boyfriend or kissed a guy before. Within the first month of school, I developed a crush on an emo guy in my Spanish class named Aaron, which was strange because before then, I had always made fun of emo kids with my friends. Aaron was very skinny, had perfect black flippy hair, and gray eyes. The assigned seating had me sitting right next to him for the first few months. We talked sometimes, but I wouldn't have exactly called us friends. I remember one day, halfway through the semester, we had a class fiesta. We got to choose where we sat, so I walked in and just sat at a table by myself. I wasn't a very social person. When Aaron walked in, I knew he could sit anywhere he wanted and I doubted that would be next to me, but to my surprise, he went straight up to my table and sat down right across from me and said,"You're the only one I can talk to in this class." Being a fourteen year-old who'd never had a boyfriend, I was super happy and giddy about that. Towards the end of that semester, I had started buying darker clothing, wearing (very badly done) eyeliner, and listening to alternative rock, rather than the pop music that I listened to before then. I feel like at first, it was all just because I was trying to impress Aaron. But after awhile, that just became the music I enjoyed and the clothes I liked to wear. Meanwhile, around the time I started dressing differently, this other (much uglier) emo guy in my math class, whose name was Eric, started to notice me. Eric was about an inch shorter than I was and he was pretty chubby. He had short strawberry blonde hair, gray eyes, glasses, and bad acne. Over the next month, he kept choosing me as his partner for class stuff and we kind of started to become friends.
After winter break, Eric randomly started dating my best friend Erica, which I found odd because I didn't even know they knew eachother and I thought that he was interested in me. I was not into him in the least, but seeing how happy they looked together kept making me envious and sad that I didn't have anyone like that. At that point, Aaron had started dating someone as well, and I just really felt like no one would ever like me and I'd be doomed to be boyfriend-less forever. A few months had passed when Eric told me that he had a secret. I prodded it out of him in math class and apparently, the secret was that he didn't like Erica too much anymore and that he was falling for me. I was flattered because that meant I finally had some hope, but I was also really confused and felt obligated to tell Erica. Plus, I had no feelings for him whatsoever. As soon as I told, she began crying in the school bathroom and broke up with him that same day. The school year was coming towards an end at this point and Erica was actually really upset by the whole breakup. She assumed that Eric had only been with her as a means to get closer to me.
That summer, Erica was sent by her parents to Idaho for a year to live with another family, as kind of a rehab thing because she had been depressed and cutting herself, and I went off to a performing arts summer camp in Boston to play flute and sing. That whole summer, Eric called me every night without fail, occasionally asking me out, and every time, I would use Erica's feelings as an excuse to say no. Finally, when I returned home and sophomore year was about to start, Eric (being the emo kid that he was) told me that he was only going to ask me out one last time on the first day of school. He told me that if I said no, that he was done with everything. I assumed that meant he was going to kill himself, and he sure made it sound like that's what he intended to do. So when he asked me out on the first day of school, my response was, "Um........ yes?" And with that, he walked off with a huge grin on his face. The next month went by with us awkwardly holding hands in the school hallways, and me hoping that nobody would look at us. I had my first kiss with him and it was absolutely terrible. He pressured me into it and he tried to use tongue right away and his tongue was super wet and disgusting. After that, I wasn't so sure that kissing was something I'd ever enjoy. One day, I was hanging out with Eric and his best friend, Art. Art said that he wanted to date me after we broke up. Even if it was a joke, it was still extremely messed up for him to say with Eric standing there with us. Although, I secretly hoped it was true, because Art was actually kind of cute. Art was Mexican and had long black hair and brown eyes, and he gave me a bit of hope that cute guys could actually like me.
Anyway, after it had been a full month of awkward hand holding and gross kisses, I decided I was done with this forced relationship. I texted Eric saying that we should breakup and he called me, begging for a second chance. He said that we should date for one more week, and he'd prove to me that he could be a better boyfriend, and if I still felt this way at the end of the week, then I could breakup with him. I felt bad for him, so I decided to stick it out for another week. Well here's a shocker, I still felt the same at the end of the week, and when I called him to breakup for the second time, he told me that he was cutting himself and bleeding out while I was on the phone with him. After getting to know Eric so well, I knew that it was a bunch of bullshit, and when I saw him at school the next day, there were no cuts on his arms whatsoever. Finally, I was free.