Sunday, April 3, 2011

Kasich To Stabilize Economy

Columbus OH

In an unprecedented example of bureaucratic efficiency and resolve, John Kasich acclaimed author of The Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy, and The Wealthy Public School Teacher: How Imaginary Creatures Pose a Legitimate Threat to American Prosperity and current governor of Ohio, has signed a bill that significantly retards the collective bargaining power of Ohio state union workers.

Under the new legislation unionized state employees, including: teachers, nurses, firefighters and police, will no longer be guaranteed annual pay raises, health insurance coverage, pensions, or basic civil rights. The bill outlines the possibilities of wage augmentation through a merit-based system, though the acknowledgment of merit, as outlined by the bill, will remain wholly within the office of the Governor.

Gov. Kasich has stated that the objective of this bill is to make up a reported $19 billion discrepancy in the state budget, which is to be done by reducing the artificially inflated salaries of unionized workers, some of which are understood to be as high as $7,500 annually.

Though the bill has had little trouble being passed it has not been without controversy. State Democrats have resisted the bill from the start, and have gone as far as to organize a letter-writing campaign and potluck dinner in behalf of their pro-union constituency. Some Ohio Democrats have purportedly sent a rather vitriolic, though anonymous, letter to the GOP-led state House and Senate calling them, “Just a bunch of meanies.”