This blog is for caregivers, written by a caregiver, to give support, advice, and encouragement.

Can I really retire as the food police?

At first it bothered my conscience that I was falling down on my job as a caretaker. Finally, the conversations that I had from the marina owner expressing her regrets that her mother was deprived of the little joy she had in life before her death, and Shirley’s conversation about her mother before she passed started to sink in. I was working so hard to keep Clara alive for as long as possible, I lost sight that the quality of life along the way is important too. As I reflected back on the four or so years that I strictly enforced her diet, I wondered if Clara was able to enjoy any of the meals I worked so hard to make for her. Clara wasn’t a big sweet eater, so that wasn’t the problem. Since she was in end stage renal (kidney) failure, she was supposed to have a limited amount of fluid and a very low sodium diet. When I would steam vegetables, I would even have to estimate how much water the vegetables absorbed and deduct that from her allotted fluid for the day. There were days she would ask for another bottle of water and I would have said she had her limit for the day and I would always feel bad. Now that stress was off of me.