If you escalate too quick, you risk scaring her off, just like in this text:

Instead, try to assess the situation:

If you think she’s a prude – slowly build the tempo

If you haven’t had sex with her yet – don’t be too graphic

If you’ve already had sex, and she’s naughty in the bedroom, you have more freedom to be X rated with your sexting.

Don’t beat yourself up too much if you think you’re often guilty of “going straight for the kill”.

It’s better to be overly sexual than not be sexual at all – I’ll discuss this more later.

Just try and learn to tame the beast a little.

#2 The Nude Nagger

Despite what the law of reciprocity states, sometimes a kind favour cannot be repaid.

If you spend hours holding “Arnie-like” muscular positions in the mirror whilst groaning like Chewbacca to create the perfect naughty photoshoot, don’t think this automatically grants you a free pass to receive nudes in return.

But actually it’s quite the opposite. When sexting a girl, it’s the words you write and the fantasies you create that get her turned on.

So maybe think twice about sending an artsy shot of your member with the latest instagram filter. #sorrynotsorry

#4 Mr Unimaginative

Don’t squeeze your sext into one stand alone 50 character message. You’ll take all the fun away.

Sexting a girl the right way is like writing a novel. Your sexts should tell a story – slowly build, be full of suspense, and end on cliffhangers.

You want your texts to build sexual tension, conjure up exciting plot lines, and throw in twists to leave her horny and wanting more.

How good you are at sexting is basically defined by your story telling abilities.

You need to create vivid fantasies in her head, with you, the main character, fucking her.

#5 Revealing Your Dark Side

Unless you’re extremely comfortable with the girl you’re sexting, and/or this girl happens to be the darkest, most deviant little minx you’ve ever come across…avoid mentioning any strange fetishes you wish to play out.

If a girl sends you dirty messages, don’t take this as your cue to text her in a way you would with a sex line worker employed by Babestation!

Refrain from discussing any strange fetishes like urination or feet sucking until you’re truly comfortable with her.

#6 The Mood Killer

When you start sexting a girl, don’t get carried away and think you’re starring in a porno.

Sexting isn’t some kind of battle to determine who’s the more X-Rated texter. Any money shot talk of “jizzing over a girl’s face” should be avoided!

Same goes for potty talk. You’re hardly going to turn a girl on by informing her of your daily shitting rituals, or how the Indian curry you just devoured is causing you to experience gale force winds in the nether regions.

Keep your sexts somewhat tasteful and defecation free.

#7 One Trick Pony

A specific scenario might work really well for you, but don’t overuse it.

Don’t get me wrong, most women LOVE the dominant and submissive role play of 50 shades:

But try mixing it up and experimenting with other themes when you sext her.

Let your imagination run wild.

Talk about fucking her on a NASA expedition to the moon, or how you’d like to go down on her in the back of a Land Rover Defender watched on by hungry hyenas in the African bush.

#8 Motor Mouth

When in story mode, it’s easy to get carried away and forget sexting is a two-way conversation.

Next time you play out an erotic scenario with the girl you’re sexting, make sure to check in once in a while to see if she’s still responsive before rattling off Act 2 Scene 1 of your depraved fantasy 😉

Create pauses in your storytelling to build suspense. With this, you’ll get her begging you to finish describing what naughty things you have planned for her.

It’s also fun to occasionally leave a girl high and dry with your sexts. Like your favourite TV soap series, use cliff hangers to keep her coming back for more.

#9 Being Childish

Sexting is basically a looking glass into what you’re like in bed. It’s another step in the screening process for girls to determine if you’re a worthy suitor.

So you can imagine why joking around with sexting is a terrible mistake. It just shows you’re not ready for the big league.

Theres a time and a place for goofing around. If you’re seducing a girl into bed, would you suddenly chuck on a clown costume and start telling jokes?

Obviously not!

Same applies with sexting. You’re trying to turn her on, not make her laugh.

If you’re immature about sexting, all you’re doing is subtly communicating you’re not ready for sex.

So DON’T:

Change the subject when she tries to get sexual

Send tons of emojis and lol’s at the end of your sexts

Deliberately take the literal meaning rather than the implied meaning of her sexts – E.g. she asks for a hot photo, and you reply by sending a picture of fire.

#10 Sexting on a Different Wavelength

If you haven’t built a strong enough connection with the girl, you might struggle to click when it comes to talking dirty.

For example, this text is brilliant to send to a fellow Game of Thrones (GOT) fan:

“You make me harder than Valyrian Steel”

But if you’ve failed to establish whether she tunes into HBO on Sunday nights, this text will be about as useless as Samwell Tarly is with a sword. (Another GOT reference for you).

Sending obscure references and analogies in your sexts will only confuse her.

So avoid any geeky topics like Star Wars, Minecraft, and League of Legends unless you know she’s a big fan.

Here’s a generic reference any girl will get:

#11 Mr Clueless

As crazy as it seems, a lot of guys are totally oblivious to the fact a girl is trying to sext them.

When a girl wants to start talking dirty, here’s what she might text you:

(Apologies in advance if these examples seem obvious, but you’d be amazed how many guys fail to pick up on these cues!)

“Just got out the shower… what should I wear?”
“I’m in bed bored…”
“What are you wearing?”
“I had an interesting dream about you last night…”
“gosh I wish I could help with that throbbing headache… if only there was some kind of release…”
“it’s too cold in bed on my own ☹”

#12 Half-Assing it

If you’re sexting a girl, never hold back. It’s better to go all-in, balls to the wall, than to tread lightly and play it safe.

Remember, sexting is a looking glass into what a girl imagines you’re like in bed.

She’s looking for you to lead and be comfortable with expressing your naughty side.

So don’t text her like a Disney Prince would text his fair maiden.

Text her like a man who goes after what he wants and doesn’t stop at anything until he gets it:

But I understand this can be easier said than done….

It can be awkward at first, especially if you’re new to sexting, or the girl you’re sexting is the “Vicar’s daughter” type who’s a little prudish.