Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Healing and Growing: November 15, 2016

Yesterday, I found a rusty, smashed pin on the ground when I parked by the post-office. It wouldn't even open.

It felt like a sign.

I wear it. But it's in my wallet, because it won't open--the top part of the pin is smashed closed.

And it doesn't show.

I am sending Reiki Healing to every pin worn, everywhere, to heal both the wearer and the people who wish to seek the safety of a person wearing the pin.

I felt the energy spread out, and it's greatly needed at this time.

It doesn't matter who voted for what; people are hurting, I am a healer, and my heart opens instantly for all who are in some way moved by the use of a pin.

I stand in silent solidarity for Truth.

Everyone has their own Truth.

And the discovery of it.

I am a secondary victim, too.

When there is a poor outcome in medicine, the caregivers who are associated with the poor outcome are blamed for the event.

This causes a cascade of self-doubt, loss of confidence, total anxiety and stress over all of the ramifications of an adverse event.

Even if it is a rare but well-known complication of the specialty and was handled perfectly.

Yesterday I had a meeting with my attorney. I was so stressed I couldn't eat. I only drank water for the day. And I didn't know a representative (my case manager) from the malpractice insurance company would be there too.

It was very deeply healing for me, that meeting.

I found external validation, perspective from their work experience.

In the grand scheme of things, my 'poor outcome' was small potatoes compared to other cases they work on: there was no brain damage, no paralysis, no death, no multimillion dollar payment.
In fact, there is a possibility the case may be dropped. They spoke of it. But we are not to count on this. It's only a possibility. They explained how this would work and what steps would be taken to make it happen.

What was healing in the biggest way, was they asked me to share my fears with them.

I was afraid of the opposing council, emotionally tearing into me at deposition.I was told he is not an 'intimidation type' but a reasonable person who would be respectful, as the two lawyers had spoken.
I was afraid of being perceived as a 'bad doctor'.I was told that in medicine, if you are in the field long enough, you get sued. The defense attorney's father was OB-GYN and had been sued twice. He had done the right thing, and came out on top, both times. It was just a lot of hassle.
I was afraid of loss of income due to needing to be at depositions and court, since I am a single mother. (a strategy of prosecutors is to keep changing court dates so the doctor loses work each time they are available to the legal proceedings).I was assured they would do everything when I am available so I will not miss work.
I confessed how I do not go to work with joy in my heart any more, instead, I feel like 'who is going to sue me next?!' every time I meet with a new patient.They understood and told me I will get my confidence back; they said to think of all the patients I have helped in my career, and not the one who is taking me to court.Sometimes to heal you must get your very worst 'out there' with people who are trustworthy and have your best interest at heart; sometimes when our coping skills are exhausted we behave like toddlers on some level, and being reassured we are lovable, worthy, of value, and liked is more healing than all the medicine in the world, all the energy healing in the universe, and all the tea in China too.

This is my truth.

I know I need to find a way to live somewhere, where I can be by the ocean every single day, and snorkel. I am past fifty. Retirement isn't that far away. I haven't prepared for it. There's also my family to support. I don't know how to make it happen, or even the first steps towards getting there.

But I know, as a spiritual being who is deeply connected to earth, and who is very sensitive to the energies, I need MORE, more than crystals, more than writing, more than daily meditation, to reach my fullest potential.

So I speak with the Universe and my guides, daily, to thank them for my discovering my Truth, and to help me find my way with patience and trust in both myself and with them.

It won't be easy. But that's my future, and even if it never happens all beautiful like in this picture, I will have been walking in that general direction from where I am now, and in the walking, it's a good thing.

I see with great clarity, others who are coming forth with their truth.

And I respect it.

Whether it is a safety pin, people coming to terms with their own worst nightmare, over the election, and seeking to heal...

What is important to take to heart, is that darkness IS an Illusion, as painful as it is, and by Heaven's standards, what is important is if the individual who has participated/aligned with darkness has learned and grown by their experiences, and if they are turning away from it in the end.

Ross

(he clears his throat, Ahem!--ed)

All this is clear. (gestures with his arms like he is wiping a counter top--ed)

(he taps on the table with his index finger pointing down--tap! tap! tap!--ed) everything is under control.

None of this information could emerge without those who Do Not Have Our Best Interest At Heart being taken into submission and controlled by those of us (gestures around him--ed) on our team who DO have your VERY best interest at heart.

Carla has come to appreciate the Unity in us all--from dark to light--everyone wants to enjoy their life, and to have the very best come out of their life experience.

Some of them fall short of the mark.

And we want you to know that we are experts in how to handle it.

There is another layer which is going to come forth in time.

This is just the tip of the iceberg.

And everything which follows is going to be for the Highest Good of everyone incarnate upon Gaia at this blessed time.

This is a Renaissance!

In your lifetime all of this shall come to be true.

This is MY Truth--you are dearly loved by our Creator, and you shall be delighted in the final result after all this 'mess' (he gestures to a spill of black stuff on the counter top, and proceeds to wipe it up again--ed)

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About Me

I am a medical doctor who works in a hospital. I do anesthesia. I am also a Reiki practitioner. While I do anesthesia, I also make this form of Energy Healing available to my patients who wish to have it while their procedure is taking place.
I have quite a following at work. Many patients and coworkers request my services. Recovery room RN's love me. All of my patient report the same thing: they felt no pain. One friend's spouse actually made her take two of her pain pills at home because he absolutely could not believe she felt no pain after gallbladder surgery!