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Friday, July 31, 2009

Since I clearly had better things to do yesterday, I only saw the opening images of the Obama BeerFest 09', and missed all the mindless cable talking head analysis afterward. That's likely for the better, since this seems to have been nothing more than a big snoozy photo op with zero fireworks, and nothing of lasting value beyond Crowley's Brett Favre style press conference. Either way, I'm glad this nonsense is finally over and no longer will take up valuable space on this blog. But in typical AB.com fashion, here's my final tally.

The Winners

Sargent Crowley - Give it to this guy, he really, really, really worked the angles on this one. He was never asked to justify the discrepancies between the 911 call and his police report. Nor was he made to apologize by his employer. He never admitted any wrongdoing of any sort. Then he gets to give this very reasonable, very polished presser, which looks like an audition for an upcoming Fox News pundit gig. It was a great day for the Crowley household.

He will probably get some martyr-style promotion out of this. He will definitely get a book deal. He will absolutely become an icon for the anti-Obama crowd. And he still never apologized, just as he said he wouldn't. Is that a freakin' come-up or what?

Lucia Whalen - I hate that Gates' neighbor had to give that tearful press conference, but you just know she's already got that appearance on Oprah booked, right?

Desire Rodgers - The WH Social Secretary really nailed the imagery on this one. For some reason, at the last moment, Joe Biden was asked to attend. My Negro Radar says this was to balance things out so that the image of two brothers hunkering over a white guy wasn't what folks saw when they turned on the TV. How else do you account for Gates and Biden sitting on one side of the table and the other guys on the other, nicely balanced, all in a completely non-threatening manner?

Professor Gates - Gates went from little known black scholar with well-regarded, but little known PBS documentaries, to a man of international name recognition overnight. Sure, some folks will see him as a race-baiter, but those folks probably would have thought that anyway. Even though money is probably far from his greatest motivation, I'm pretty sure he'll end up with a bigger stage to tell his next story.

The Losers

Obama - Yeah, he handled it well in the end, but his numbers took a hit, and you know opponents will try and paint him as "anti-police" in the future. Never mind the fact that Obama's "stupidly" comment was correct, Gates should never have been arrested. And that his inferences about "racial profiling" were in regards to the question posed, not directly related to Gates' situation. It's just another example of how this White House lets the media narrative get out of control, rather than "controlling the message", which is something his predecessor was actually quite good at.

Black Folks - Let's face it my peoples, we took an "L" on this one. The next time there's a legitimate story that involves racial profiling, the words "well what about Professor Gates?" are definitely trailing. I'm not saying this is an epic fail of Tawanna Brawley type proportions, but it damn sure ain't help.

Officer Leon Lashley - When Crowley's fellow black officer (seen outside the Gates home as he was hauled off in cuffs) went on CNN to go to bat for his boy, I lauded him as a stand up guy. So please explain to me why Lashley got all emo and ended up sending a letter to the White House along with Crowley, assailing those who called him an Uncle Tom?

Seriously, if you are going to take a bold public stand, you just can't be this mad when others disagree with you. Do you know how many times MLK was called an Uncle Tom and how many black churches effectively blackballed him for this beliefs? You did what you felt was right, people complain, then you write a letter crying about people complaining. That's sort of a b*tch move, man. Now I'm beginning to wonder if you were forced to do this. Get over yourself, brother. This is so not about you.

Joe Biden - I totally, totally, totally understand not drinking for moral/ethical reasons. Biden contends that he's never drank a beer in his life, and yesterday was no reason to start. Agree with that too. But come the hell on, man, why was this bama drinkin' an O'Douhl's? What sorta d-bag drinks non-alcoholic beer anyway? Isn't that sorta like drinking decaffeinated coffee? Uhhh, doesn't that sorta undermine the point of the whole thing? Why not just go ahead and poke hokes in your own condoms while you're at it. Beer without alcohol = L.O.S.E.R.

Race Relations In America - Do you feel any more post-racial? I sure don't.

Since I clearly had better things to do yesterday, I only saw the opening images of the Obama BeerFest 09', and missed all the mindless cable talking head analysis afterward. That's likely for the better, since this seems to have been nothing more than a big snoozy photo op with zero fireworks, and nothing of lasting value beyond Crowley's Brett Favre style press conference. Either way, I'm glad this nonsense is finally over and no longer will take up valuable space on this blog. But in typical AB.com fashion, here's my final tally.

The Winners

Sargent Crowley - Give it to this guy, he really, really, really worked the angles on this one. He was never asked to justify the discrepancies between the 911 call and his police report. Nor was he made to apologize by his employer. He never admitted any wrongdoing of any sort. Then he gets to give this very reasonable, very polished presser, which looks like an audition for an upcoming Fox News pundit gig. It was a great day for the Crowley household.

He will probably get some martyr-style promotion out of this. He will definitely get a book deal. He will absolutely become an icon for the anti-Obama crowd. And he still never apologized, just as he said he wouldn't. Is that a freakin' come-up or what?

Lucia Whalen - I hate that Gates' neighbor had to give that tearful press conference, but you just know she's already got that appearance on Oprah booked, right?

Desire Rodgers - The WH Social Secretary really nailed the imagery on this one. For some reason, at the last moment, Joe Biden was asked to attend. My Negro Radar says this was to balance things out so that the image of two brothers hunkering over a white guy wasn't what folks saw when they turned on the TV. How else do you account for Gates and Biden sitting on one side of the table and the other guys on the other, nicely balanced, all in a completely non-threatening manner?

Professor Gates - Gates went from little known black scholar with well-regarded, but little known PBS documentaries, to a man of international name recognition overnight. Sure, some folks will see him as a race-baiter, but those folks probably would have thought that anyway. Even though money is probably far from his greatest motivation, I'm pretty sure he'll end up with a bigger stage to tell his next story.

The Losers

Obama - Yeah, he handled it well in the end, but his numbers took a hit, and you know opponents will try and paint him as "anti-police" in the future. Never mind the fact that Obama's "stupidly" comment was correct, Gates should never have been arrested. And that his inferences about "racial profiling" were in regards to the question posed, not directly related to Gates' situation. It's just another example of how this White House lets the media narrative get out of control, rather than "controlling the message", which is something his predecessor was actually quite good at.

Black Folks - Let's face it my peoples, we took an "L" on this one. The next time there's a legitimate story that involves racial profiling, the words "well what about Professor Gates?" are definitely trailing. I'm not saying this is an epic fail of Tawanna Brawley type proportions, but it damn sure ain't help.

Officer Leon Lashley - When Crowley's fellow black officer (seen outside the Gates home as he was hauled off in cuffs) went on CNN to go to bat for his boy, I lauded him as a stand up guy. So please explain to me why Lashley got all emo and ended up sending a letter to the White House along with Crowley, assailing those who called him an Uncle Tom?

Seriously, if you are going to take a bold public stand, you just can't be this mad when others disagree with you. Do you know how many times MLK was called an Uncle Tom and how many black churches effectively blackballed him for this beliefs? You did what you felt was right, people complain, then you write a letter crying about people complaining. That's sort of a b*tch move, man. Now I'm beginning to wonder if you were forced to do this. Get over yourself, brother. This is so not about you.

Joe Biden - I totally, totally, totally understand not drinking for moral/ethical reasons. Biden contends that he's never drank a beer in his life, and yesterday was no reason to start. Agree with that too. But come the hell on, man, why was this bama drinkin' an O'Douhl's? What sorta d-bag drinks non-alcoholic beer anyway? Isn't that sorta like drinking decaffeinated coffee? Uhhh, doesn't that sorta undermine the point of the whole thing? Why not just go ahead and poke hokes in your own condoms while you're at it. Beer without alcohol = L.O.S.E.R.

Race Relations In America - Do you feel any more post-racial? I sure don't.