Friday, September 27, 2013

"That's right. These latest secularist measures are an attack against religious freed— Hey, you! Rosary beads are not for decoration! Don't wear them like that again. By the way, I haven't seen you in Mass. Don't miss it next Sunday. I'll hear you in confession beforehand.

"Where was I...? Oh, right! Religious freedom is a fundamental value and it is unacceptable that..."

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

"Ladies and gentlemen, the situation is as follows. In twenty-eight days' time, the asteroid Seymour will impact Earth. In the next twenty-four hours, a ship carrying an especially trained crew will take off with the mission of intercepting this asteroid and presenting it with the Nobel Peace Prize it has been granted."