Sticky and sweet or dry and sour

People who know us are well aware that we have never liked the target of our Celebrity Smackdown.Honestly writing about this bitch is a little too easy; kind of like shooting whores in a barrel.This is the queen of shock and has created a career out of reinvention.If left to her own talent, she would be singing back up in Laughlin for Jessica Simpson.This lady has exchanged talent for nudity and people lap it up.Of course we are talking about Madonna and we will shower after this post.

We won’t talk about her music since it’s horrible and we wouldn’t be able to identify her songs anyway until the blood trickled out of our ears.There is no point in mentioning her movies since we like to be humorous and her acting causes more pain than a kidney stone.We could mention her Kabbalah devotion but, like everything she does, who the hell could take any of that seriously.So what’s left?

She recently divorced Guy Richie under the speculation that she was already seeing Alex Rodriguez.Now A-Rod is a Miami boy who was married and had two little girls.It seems kind of ridiculous that the celebrity mouthpiece of Kaballah would purposefully begin a relationship with a much younger married man since her religion does tout the belief of karma, which is the purpose of the red string “what comes around goes around”.Our perspective is this, shame on you A-Rod!This woman is old enough to be your Mom (albeit a very young teenage mother) and is more ripped than you when you were juicing and breaking records. She has wandered from sex icon to perverse fetish.

The bottom line is she has kids.In the old days without all the access to information, celebrity kids could be shielded from the adventures of their parents.Sure there could be rumors of perversion and drug use but the kids, unless they were witnessing it, were pretty much out of the loop.These days, kids see everything.Whether it’s on TV or on the net, Madonna’s kids will know all of Mom’s exploits.So Miss Transformation, who a few years ago was the model mommy writing shitty kids books, what are you teaching your daughter and two sons?

We’ll tell you what you’re teaching them.You’re teaching them that boundaries and commitments only last until they don’t suit your needs.You needed publicity so you dumped your husband and started fucking around with a baseball player.Now that he seems too staid for you, you’re splacking a 22 year old Brazilian model.That guy is ten years older than your daughter?!Your daughter will learn that she will never be enough and one does not need talent but sex to stay relevant in this world.Your sons will see women as objects.Period.Sexuality is just another accessory in your bag of tricks.What’s missing from that bag is any talent that would merit you any of your success. So the difference between what you do and prostitution is…?