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There’s a New Heidi Montag Record Out Today

Aside from Vampire Weekend and the new Laura Veirs record, it’s a pretty slow week for releases, so I decided to check out the new Heidi Montag record, which is called Superficial, presumably because we’re supposed to believe that Heidi Montag is very much aware that she’s bad at singing and that she stands as a shining example of all the things that caused everyone to say the 00s was the worst decade ever. And in fairness, I suppose I do believe that, which is why I can’t really find it in myself to waste too much time hating her—it’s not her fault that we’ve let her become famous, and I suspect a lot of people would conduct themselves similarly were they to find themselves in a her position.

Anyway she still released a record that is total bullshit, and for that we should mock her. In my cursory scan of Superficial, it seems the best place to start is “More is More.” I really recommend trying to track down the uncensored version (ooh, here it is), because it’s way cooler when she says, “More is more on the dance floor, it’s fucking chaos in here!” than when she says, “it’s total chaos in here.”