One of the benefits of being ostensibly unemployed is access to all the babes (if I might use that term) a guy could ever want. Just watching “The View” alone, one can get one’s fill, and then some, of females of nearly every stripe – liberal, conservative, shrill, sarcastic, blunt, shrill, smart, not so smart, shrill, skinny, full bodied, and did I mention shrill?

I tune into “The View” occasionally — usually when I need a reminder that being single is, as Martha Stewart would say, “a good thing.”

Still “The View” doesn’t give me everything, so, slightly more often, I tune into Rachael Ray, who is able to satisfy my remaining manly needs. There I find — though often in doses too large for my tastes – warmth, perkiness, sensitivity, and what’s for dinner tonight.

Yesterday, in addition to learning about “the naughty side” of Julianna Margulies, of “The Good Wife,” and how to mix fettuccine, prosciutto (which is a fancy word for ham), Brussels sprouts and a sprinkling of Parmigiano-Reggianointo a quick and easy meal, we viewers got to see Rachael go to the rescue of a New Jersey animal shelter.

The show feature a taped segment of Ray arriving — in a truck filled with a year’s supply of Nutrish dog food — at the All Humane Animal Rescue, Inc., in Wanaque, New Jersey.

She meets a few of the animals, including a pit bull with cigarette burns and two Chow Chow mixes who, due to neglect, had lost much of their ear fur, then hands over a $20,000 check to Lysa DeLaurentis, the rescue’s founder and an animal control officer who works for four different municipalities.

DeLaurentis, who appeared on yesterday’s show along with the two Chows — still in need of homes — takes in stray, abandoned and surrendered animals that might otherwise be euthanized and finds new homes for them. After a complaint from a neighbor, state officials visited and informed her that, in addition to structural improvements to the barn she kept the animals in, she needed a license.

With that, the single mother — though she lacked enough money to fully accomplish it — began making the improvements that would bring her operation into accord with state rules and regulations.

The check from Rachael Ray came just in time to help her get the work completed before winter.

Way to go, Rachael. I will keep you (if we can stay away from the Brussels sprouts) in my daytime TV talk show harem … as long as you don’t get shrill.

The quick answer is no. Despite a recent boo boo — actually a boo boo repeated from 2006 — in one of her “dog-friendly” recipes, Rachel Ray, whether you find her endearing or annoying, appears to be a true dog person, dog lover and dog philanthropist.

That one of her recipes — reprinted alongside a profile of Ray in this month’s Modern Dogmagazine — calls for onions, which can be toxic to dogs, was an unfortunate oversight, a result of either the conflicting information that’s out there or a reflection of Ray’s learning curve when it comes to canines.

The recipe in question, “Isaboo’s Butternut Squash Mac and Cheddar,” originally appeared in Ray’s own magazine, Every Day with Rachael Ray, which runs a “pet friendly” recipe in every issue — a meal you can make for both you and your dog to eat.

The macaroni and cheese dish, which calls for half an onion, was the first of those to appear in the magazine, back in March 2006.

“There are no fillers. No junk. Just lots of good, wholesome stuff. How cool is that? And you know me. I’m all about giving back, so some of the proceeds from Rachael Ray Nutrish go to charities that take care of animals who have no one else to look out for them. Wow. How good do you feel now?”

But back to poisoning dogs.

After the onion episode came to light, we went back and checked all the “dog-friendly” recipes Ray has published in her magazine, starting in April 2006 — all 27 of them — and we’re pleased to report that none of them are likely to kill your dog.

True, some of them call for avocados, which are toxic to dogs, and scallions, which are toxic to dogs, and nutmeg, high levels of which can result in seizures, tremors, central nervous system problems and death.

But almost always those recipes point out — either in the ingredient list or in the directions — to use those items only in the human portions.

Rachael Ray has launched her new line of “super premium” dog food and treats, called “Rachael Ray Nutrish.”
I’m sure it is delish.
The daytime TV host, 30-minute meal-maker, best-selling author, perky shortener of words and pet lover — pictured here with her pit bull mix Isaboo — said the following in a press release: “I love my dog Isaboo and as a member of my family I need to make sure that she eats as well as the rest of us. With the launch of Nutrish, I now have the opportunity to share with other pet lovers some of her favorite meals, flavors and special treats.”

Manufactured by Ainsworth Pet Nutrition, the dog food includes two varieties, both all natural and featuring “real meat” as the first ingredient — Chicken and Veggies (as Rachael would call them) and Beef and Brown Rice.

There’s also a line of treats named after Isaboo. Isaboo Booscotti crunchy treats come in two flavors — bacon and peanut butter; and Isaboo Grill Bites chewy treats come in beefy burger and bacony burger flavors. For more information on the food and treats, go to nutrishforpets.com.

Ray will donate her share of the proceeds to Rachael’s Rescue, which is dedicated to helping at-risk animals through adoption, medical care and educational programs, along with training and outreach initiatives.

With Ellen DeGeneres and Rachael Ray both having their own dog food lines, it might be fun to come up with some other daytime TV host dog food and treat lines.

Here, I’ll get us started:

Jerry Springer’s Spicy Rawhide Chews: Just unwrap and watch you dog tear into these treats, guaranteed to spice up his day. Ingredients: Scraps and more scraps; no nutritional value whatsoever. (Caution: Never place one between two dogs as fighting may result. Continued consumption may result in feelings of shame about one’s species.)