Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson Repent, Media-Free For 90 Days

(New Brunswick) -- In the Sprit of Rutgers, as part of their self-imposed repentance to atone for prejudging shock jock Don Imus for yadda blah blah, spiritual leaders and media ho's Rev. Al Sharp Tongue and Rev. Jymie Jackson have checked into a celebrity rehab for the loquacious and verbally diarrhea-prone.

Rehab director Sen. Joe Biden (D-Clean & Articulate) welcomed the two to his monastic Trappist retreat where Mum's the word - as well as the beverage of choice. Next step, admitting there IS a power greater than themselves, according to spiritual directors Bill Clinton & Tony Blair. Guest speakers will include Oprah and Imus the new darlings of the speaking circuit. Enough said.

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