Imagine

By: Heartbreak Ace

Imagine your life as a man is going along perfectly. You have the girl of your dreams, your chosen career or educational
route is unfolding nicely. All is well and you have a clean bill of health. For
the average man this sounds like the good life, exactly what one would want
right? Now on the other hand, imagine if one of those factors were removed, not
just any one, but THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. Whether it be through breakup, divorce,
separation, death, or any other reason. The removal of this one key factor can
have some life changing effects on the Men they happen to. As a man who has
experienced this particular heartbreak, I took the time to document my day to
day feelings as well as my will to continue on through my daily activities.
Before I get to that let me give a little back story.

I was 18 at the time, fresh out of
high school, when I met a woman who was fairly older than me. Who, at the time,
I didn’t know would be the one to teach me some of the hardest lessons in my
life. Following school, I was set up to attend a pretty good institution of
higher learning. But as months passed leading up to my departure, this woman and
I grew closer and fell into what some would say is love. So much so, that I
decided to change my college of choice to stay closer to her. It’s always in
the beginning of relationships when you can only see the positives, which causes
you to make decisions that you later come to realize you probably should have
further thought out. My relationships with friends dwindled, some not so much
because of growing apart, but more so because I CHOSE to put all my time and
efforts into my relationship. Over the course of about 3 years, my relationship
with this woman continued to blossom. We moved in together, we shared a car,
etc. I was certain that marriage was our next step.

Then, for me the unthinkable
happened. The woman, who had given me so many good feelings, told me that she
no longer wished to be in a relationship with me. Needless to say, I was
crushed. I couldn’t understand what had went wrong and why now all of a sudden I
had to deal with not having the woman that I thought was perfect for me. When a
relationship is going well, one never notices just how much their happiness has
become dependent on their significant other. Following the breakup, I moved out
of our apartment, let her keep the car out of anger, and basically moved back
to my original home to start over. My recovery to this issue was a process,
because my trust level for the opposite sex had gone out the window and for
good reason. For months I entertained numerous females in order to drown out
the anger I felt, but it was to no effect. One day I woke up and said to myself,
“That’s it!” and it was that day that my life changed forever.

I found the key to breakup recovery, which can
save any Man from those feelings that I had no choice but to face. With these
simple steps, I believe gentleman everywhere could have an approach established
in order to neutralize these feelings.

4.Come to Terms with Reality

In
situations of this caliber, one must face the harsh TRUTH. The truth is that
for whatever reason there’s a very real chance that you and this woman may
never be together again. I tell you this not to upset you, but to help you
exhale and maybe have that final cry so that when you’re done, you’re done. Accepting
reality is the key to this method, because one must understand that life is
incredibly short and as far as I know we only get one chance at this. Imagine
the time wasted on being heartbroken, this step is a lot easier said than done
and may take some time, but it’s important you tackle these realities at your
own pace. I’m not saying reconciliation isn’t possible, but I am saying one
must make himself content with every possibility.

3. Change Yourself for the Better

Directly
following my “wake up call” I decided it was time for a change. I began
visiting the gym regularly and eating better, I decided I wanted to try
something new with my hairstyle, and I also acquired a new job. All of these
things assisted me in feeling better about myself, as well as helped me keep my
mind off of the feeling of sadness I felt. This step is a little tricky,
because for gentleman who lost their woman to cheating, separation, or divorce,
you must make sure that your motives behind this are pure. By this I mean
you’re attempting to better yourself for YOURSELF, not to try to win the girl
back or to try and impress her. Because after all, as a Man you have to be
pleased with yourself before you can ever truly please a women.

2. Don't Fall into Negative Habits

When
facing a tough situation like this, the average person tends to find comfort in
vices that may become harmful if done in excess. Smoking, Drinking, Gambling, and
Drug use to name a few are things one should avoid when dealing with their
emotions, because what most don’t understand is when you’re emotional, you’re
no longer rational and “moderation” usually goes out the window and people find
themselves drowning their sorrows in their negative hobbies as an escape. The
end result is usually long term use due to emotional instability, and the feeling
of a mental addiction. E.G. (One only feels happy when using these vices, which
results in the associated NEED to use them.)

1. Live Life and ADAPT

This
is the Final and most important step, but the easiest, because it should come
naturally. As a child, how do you get over losing your favorite toy? You
replace it with a cooler, more modern toy. Not to say woman are playthings LOL,
but I found it completely helpful to my situation to spend time with other woman
quite often. There’s no point of sitting around wasting away while the person
you’re sad about is doing whatever, with whomever. The key here is to Adapt.
There is no harm in dating or having a few one night stands here and there. And
who knows, in doing this you may find a Woman who’s everything you ever wanted,
even more so then the one you gave up.

Upon
completing these steps, you as a man should not only feel a form of relief, but
you should also feel as if you’ve regained control of your situation. The level
of stress and anxiety should have subsided, and your thinking patterns should
be a lot clearer. I’m aware that all people are different and will have
different reactions and results, but EVERY person, in order to move forward,
must be willing to Adapt.

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