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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

The Internal Editor

Most times I am grateful for my "Internal Editor". I'm not sure if it's a God-given gift or a result of my father's insistence that "if you'd thought about it first, you wouldn't have to apologize afterward"..... or both.

The times when the booming voice - or the quietest whisper - speak wisdom to me JUST BEFORE I open my trap, I'm sure it's God-given. The times that I have listened to that voice, I have been very grateful. Long after the moment, I say "thank You, God...."

In the moment, is an entirely different story. Everything within me wants to ignore the message, or tell Him (so very kindly) to "butt out, I've to got react to this!" Those times haven't turned out so well. They end with me apologizing for saying things I didn't mean, or over reacting, or some such thing.... and kicking myself for not listening.

Sometimes it helps for me to repeat what I've heard - either aloud or in my head. Stepping back and saying "Forgive him, he knows not what he is doing", distracts the "are you kidding me?" long enough to at least clean up the language or the tone of voice so that I can respond rather than react.

I love my Editor, the Spirit of Wisdom, Grace, Guidance and Discernment.