technicalbobhttps://technicalbob.net
Not Another Novel BlogMon, 13 Aug 2018 21:25:22 +0000enhourly1http://wordpress.com/https://technicalbob.files.wordpress.com/2018/07/cropped-received_10160645192185193.jpeg?w=32technicalbobhttps://technicalbob.net
3232Come Fly With Me – Part IIhttps://technicalbob.net/2018/06/02/come-fly-with-me-part-ii/
https://technicalbob.net/2018/06/02/come-fly-with-me-part-ii/#respondSat, 02 Jun 2018 22:39:34 +0000http://technicalbob.net/?p=170Today was one to tick off the old bucket list, taking the controls of an areoplane. To be precise a Robin R3000 as pictured below.

We’ve made a whole weekend around this event, taking in a show at the Minack Theatre (for the good Lady Wife to tick off her own bucket list), eating fish and chips in Padstow, ice cream in St Ives and even buying our first bonsai tree. More on that later.

My journey began at Newquay airport in Cornwall at FLYNQY’s flight school first thing in the morning. The weather was somewhat cloudy with a chance of rain so we had already phoned ahead to be sure of the experience going ahead. Upon arriving we met Marshall our experience pilot and comic. He was a genuinely nice guy and loved making jokes about his crippling fear of heights amongst other things. He put us at ease and answered all our questions about what the plane was like and where we’d be flying.

I always thought that flying was strictly controlled and all flights, of any nature, needed to be planned in advance and scheduled with the air traffic control. Apparently I was wrong. He let us decide if we fly north towards Boscastle or south towards St Ives. The wife wasted no time in deciding on St Ives as it’s her favourite place down here. One quick phone call to the tower seemed to sort it all out and we were off toward the tarmac. The light aircraft was pretty cool really. Brown leather seats and an awesome 70’s looking dashboard with an egg timer stuck onto the Captains yoke for some reason that was not fully explained even though I specifically asked.

This was only a taster flight not a real lesson so I played no part in taking off other than getting to push the throttle full forward to send us roaring up the runway. I did have one hand on the yolk and both feet on the pedals which were mimicking the inputs of the pilot so I had a vague sense of what he was doing.

We climbed up to about 1500ft, high enough to be airborne, low enough to be below the clouds. High enough to manoeuvre the plane safely, low enough to get a crystal clear view of Cornwalls stunning scenery. Once we were up and flying I took the controls and Marshall gave me a quick tutorial on banking the plane.

What I learned very quickly is flying a plane is not like driving a car, nor is it like driving a steam train. It is much, much simpler and more casual than both. There’s no obstacles, no imminent danger to avoid, no traffic lights or junctions. It’s mostly gentle imputs on the yoke to start and stop a turn. If you steer a car left and let go of the wheel, it will straighten itself up. Steer a plane left and let go, you’ll be going round in a circle for a long time. It’s easy to get back to horizontal and once there the plane takes care of business. Once airborne, as long as you have velocity, the plane is happy just to chug along. The only vigilance required is to correct for the bumpiness of the air, the price you pay for the excellent view beneath the clouds.

As we flew over St Ives we decided to head up above the clouds, another aircraft was in the area with parachute jumpers on board. Once again, the pilot took control as more advanced skills were needed to make the plane climb safely. Flying up through the clouds was an experience. They were just right there out the window, then we were in them, then above. It reminded me of the scene in the Never Ending Story where Sebastian is riding on Falcor. The clouds are there and you just go through them and amongst them. It’s majestic.

We went up as high as 3000ft. Nothing compared to commercial aircraft but then you wouldn’t get the views we had. Going up through the clouds actually drives home the fact you are in the sky more than just looking down on the world. We didn’t stay up for long. The experience was coming to an end so we had to descend, braving the few moments where you have no visibility whatsoever diving through the clouds before emerging back into the rough air and bouncing through a steep bank round St Michaels Mount.

Now, I’ve flown many planes over the years in all manner of video games, from pilotwings on the N64 to the GTA games and most recently in Ghost Recon Wildlands. In all these cases one thing was the same. Taking off and flying around is easy. It’s landing that takes all the skill and effort. Marshall was very calm about it and making his customary jokes about never having done it before. I was concentrating on lining up the runway, a task that is significantly easier in real life, I can only assume that rendering happens much quicker in reality. Whatever the reasons, I got the plane lined up for the landing and felt that I had done it myself whether my pilot had helped or not. As for the actual landing, well he humoured me by saying we would do it together but I could feel all the controls moving without me and there was all sorts of button pressing and lever pulling going on. Regardless, we landed well with only a minor bump and taxied back to base. I can now add aeroplane to my growing list of vehicles I’ve driven. If I’m honest, whilst there is almost no comparison of the two, the steam train footplate experience just wins it for me. The sheer power available in a steam locomotive is second to none and bringing one to a halt right where you want is not only scary and difficult but extremely satisfying as is getting the coal to land evenly in the firebox. That said, you can’t rival the view or the tranquillity of flying and aircraft. Both are things I’d very much like to do again.

If you want to read Part I, which is me rambling on about my views on my views flying over England and Scotland then click this link – Come Fly With Me

Also, if you want to visit the website of the nice people who let me have a jolly in their plane, do so here – FLYNQY

]]>https://technicalbob.net/2018/06/02/come-fly-with-me-part-ii/feed/0received_10160645192185193technicalbobreceived_10160645193300193received_10160645193135193received_10160645192475193received_10160645190220193received_10160645190440193Come Fly With Mehttps://technicalbob.net/2018/04/16/come-fly-with-me/
https://technicalbob.net/2018/04/16/come-fly-with-me/#commentsMon, 16 Apr 2018 17:39:59 +0000http://technicalbob.net/?p=158I fly quite regularly. From single engine flights over my home town to long haul flights all over the world. I can’t say I enjoy it all that much, I travel economy class so most often I don’t even have a window seat and I’m crammed in and uncomfortable like everyone else. Just recently though, I flew from Birmingham to Inverness for business reasons. It was still economy class as it was a tiny turbo prop plane. I had the window seat and spent most of my time looking out upon the land that is Britain.

Flying at quite a low altitude, I believe these planes can only reach 7600m, gave me opportunity to take in the sights of Northern England. From up here, the scenery looks flat, disorganised and mostly green. I know full well there are hills aplenty but I can’t make them out, they just lack definition. I also notice a distinct lack of forests, I could see quarries and marinas, small towns and villages. There were small pockets of trees, but nothing that resembled a sprawling forest like you see in movies.

A little bit further north and you see it, the definition arrives and you see snowy peaks, the beginnings of the Highlands. Unfortunately, the cloud thickens like a woollen carpet, because Scotland. Frequent breaks in the nimbus give you glimpses forests that you can see have been shaped by forestry, rivers that have clearly taken the path of least resistance, meandering through the scenery. Then briefly a city, with its little boxes sprawled out haphazardly. It’s all unorganised, I guess most of the landscape is designed by nature but you realise quite quickly up here that nothing we build is designed to look nice or interesting from above, there’s no real reason for it to.

Up above the clouds it is certainly tranquil, noisy propeller engine aside. It takes me back to a tandem skydive I did for charity. The initial rush of air as we descended at speed was exhilarating and totally at odds with the serenity that comes after the chute opens. I’ve never felt a peace quite like it anywhere else. It also takes me forward. I have an introductory flight experience booked later this year. I hope it will paint a much more organic picture of the freedoms of flying as it will be a small four seat plane at a much lower altitude. Hopefully it’s propeller won’t have industrial gaffer tape on like this plane does…

Have you ever listened to a song and, even though you’ve heard it many times before, found yourself hearing it for the first time?

Sometimes, we listen but don’t necessarily ‘hear’ or take in whats actually being said. I’ve found this a number of times just recently. Most of the time I listened to music in the past was in loud clubs and pubs. You hear the songs, you dance to the beat, you sing along to the chorus. You don’t always catch the details of the verse though. A big example; Sit Down by James. Whenever this song played in my regular haunts there was a simple routine of singing along to the chorus whilst sitting on the dance floor, only to be inevitably shouted at by security staff to stand back up. Thanks to Spotify I now have that song in a playlist and happily sing along to it when I’m driving. I didn’t know most of the words however and quickly found that the song is not just an invitation to sit down but had much deeper themes involving depression and loneliness. It’s a song I could have used in my personal playlist of 15 years ago even though it was right there all along.

Today it happened again. There was a news report this morning urging people to not ask their Doctors for antibiotics as many bacteria are becoming resistant to them. Later in the day, Thank U by Alanis Morissette came over the radio. The first line, ‘How about getting off of these antibiotics’ grabbed my attention and suddenly had me thinking that Alanis was preaching the very idea being pitched on the news this morning, almost 20 years ago. ‘What other pearls of wisdom are contained in this song?’ is one way of putting what I thought to myself and listened hard to what followed. I heard most of the lyrics quite clearly and recalled that I had wondered why she specifically thanked India before. I got the sense that the song was about having been disillusioned and also about forgiveness. Having Googled it, I wasn’t too far away as the song is apparently her reflections on stopping and taking stock of her life after her initial rise to fame didn’t make her deliriously happy.

Such is the beauty of music, poetry and writing. It’s all interpretive. You can enjoy whats there on the surface or find your own deeper meanings. In Thank U, I found that the line about transparent dangling carrots took me back to A levels and being told what to study so as not to sell myself short. I never found a light at the end of that tunnel.

‘How about how good it feels to finally forgive you’ also resonated. I remember forgiving an old friend after months of making him feel bad. It took me forgiving him to realise I hadn’t even been mad at him but rather the girl who came between us. I forgave her too in the end which ultimately made me realise that none of it had mattered at all and I’d held onto some anger and resentment for nothing.

So remember, pay attention to what your favourite artists are singing to you. They’re people too. Fame doesn’t stop you having feelings and troubles. Take some consolation that other people feel the same way as you and that it’s okay to talk about it. You probably aren’t going to help them, but maybe they are already trying to help you.

For some people, happiness is measured in wealth and material possessions. We all learned from Fight Club what can happen; you no longer own your possessions, they end up owning you. After all, you can’t buy happiness and money won’t buy you love. Who knows? Perhaps that new car is just the thing to really make you happy after all, or does it just move the goal posts once the initial joy has passed?

For some, happiness is a state of mind, a delerium brought on by a new romance or finding a great new pub. It’s well documented that taking a break from all your worries sure does help a lot and a change is often as good as a rest.

Some people are happy all the time, seems it’s just their natural state. Always pleased to see you and always concerned for how you are. Rich or poor it doesn’t matter to them. If you can’t be happy in you’re own skin, then money won’t make it any better.

Some people are only happy when there’s drama. To be the centre of attention and the focus of everyone’s praise or pity is the only time they seem content.

Then there are those who never seem happy. The people who always receive ‘cheer up mate, it might never happen’. The ones who go thriugh life wondering what more there is, like an elephant feeding, nothing is ever enough.

So what’s right? Is there something, someone or an amount of cash for everyone? Is it buying a house, getting married, having a kid? Awards or victories?

It’s all these things and yet none of them. It’s a fleeting moment and a state of mind. A chemical reaction in your body and brain. It’s a myth, yet life would be nothing without out it. It’s everything and nothing, but what we perceive it to be. Whatever it is, it’s unique to you and starts with you. Don’t buy into the swindle, the hoax that a new anything will make you happy. Your happiness is yours however you shape it, however you take it.

I often have the same argument with people, usually when a new film or TV show featuring time hopping adventurers appears. Don’t get me wrong, I love Back to the Future and Terminator as much as anyone else. There’s nothing wrong with imagining time travel, heck I’d love to try and wrap my brain around writing a dimension bending, convoluted time travel story myself. I bet it involves a lot of post-it notes and white board timeline diagrams.

Back to reality though. Let’s assume time travel is possible. As far as I’m aware, there are theories on time and space that mean, if we were to approach the speed of light, then return to our point of origin, time would have progressed much faster than for us travelling at speed. In short, for us a day would pass, but for those left behind possibly years could go by. So far, so good.

Going backwards in time is a bit more difficult. The past has gone. It has happened and is done. Going forward just means getting to the inevitable quicker. Going back means that the past and everything that ever existed in it must still exist somewhere. I believe alternate dimensions is a considered possibility.

But let’s stick to time travel in this dimension, Back to the Future style, where you get in your time machine and simply travel to the time and date of your choice. The first problem of time travel is germs. Simply put, if you don’t get out of your time machine wearing a totally disinfected hazmat suit then you’re going to have problems. You might not get sick, but everyone you come into contact with will have no immunity whatsoever to all the highly evolved bacteria you’ll be carrying. You could literally cause a black plague size event.

Getting into time travel paradoxes about killing your own grandfather before your father is born will just melt your brain. Surely, the past has already happened so any time travellers that go back will already have made their effects on time? Unless it really is like back to the future where you can go back and change things so the future pans out differently. In this scenario maybe many people in the future will inevitably go back and change all the worst bits of history. If they do though, everything we do now is ultimately pointless as it’ll all change. The chance of any one sperm hitting its goal is incredibly low so the chance of the same one hitting the mark in a slightly altered world are astronomically impossible.

So, being that both world wars still stand and definitely happened are we to assume that we are still on the first run through? That no one in the future has been back and changed events to create the best possible history? What if it isn’t? What if this reality is the best possible? What if generations of time travellers in a distant future have spent centuries changing time over and over and this is the best they could manage? It leaves some big questions, my first being who or what was worse than Hitler?

Professor Stephen Hawking, I believe, answered the time travel debate once and for all. Not with fancy physics equations or a theory on temporal dimensions in space. He simply hosted a party for time travellers. The beauty of it being that he didn’t invite anyone until the next day. Obviously, no one showed up to that party. It’s conclusive evidence for me as anyone who could build a time machine would undoubtedly hold Professor Hawking in high esteem. At the end of the day, who could resist an opportunity to party with him?

]]>https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/22/no-time-like-the-present/feed/0Time MachinetechnicalbobThe Decoration Loophttps://technicalbob.net/2017/01/18/the-decoration-loop/
https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/18/the-decoration-loop/#respondWed, 18 Jan 2017 22:12:08 +0000http://technicalbob.wordpress.com/?p=106Have you ever felt like you’re just going round in circles? That no matter how much thought and effort you put into something, you’ll end up doing it over and over again forever? If you know that feeling then chances are you’re married and have lived in your own home for more than a few years.

I have recently reached the end of the first lap of decorating our house and, as a result, am now starting the second. The Forth road bridge, now that paint technology has moved on, doesn’t even need that kind of attention anymore! To be fair, the first ‘coat’ was mostly just making the place our own and getting rid of the dark (think thick mucus from a particularly nasty winter cold) green that the previous owners thought was a good idea.

Lap one was paint. The second time around we’ve stepped up to include wallpaper and matching curtains. Surely lap three will involve knocking down walls and building extensions…

But it’s not all bad. I’m going to decorate the office to resemble a ship captains office on an old schooner style boat. Like some sort of pirate but with a paint brush instead of a hook. I say ships captain, but that’s the pinterest board dream. It’s probably going to be some reclaimed wood and an antique ships wheel but a man’s den is his kingdom and his imagination is king.
So here’s to the decoration loop and all those lost weekends spent watching the ceiling dry, marvelling how much cleaner it looks. Wiping spots of paint of the skirting board and peeling off masking tape to see it served no purpose at all. Putting wallpaper paste on the wrong side of the wallpaper and screaming at the cat because it sat on the paint lid, then sat on the bed.

Here’s to the sense of achievement and pride in working on your day off doing a job that tradesmen do full time to pay their bills. Here’s to taking a step back and then starting all over again.

Endless. Forever. Immortal. These are all words that we associate with infinity, of both the physical world and of life itself. What do really know about infinity? The more we study something that appears to be infinite, the more we realise that it is not so. Once upon a time, I imagine that mankind stood upon the shores of the ocean and gazed out to a seemingly infinite body of water. After he built a boat and set sail, he discovered a new land upon the other side. The infinite ocean became finite and tangible. Even humanity, with all it’s variation and beauty has been used up to the point where there are an estimated 7 doppelgängers for each ‘unique’ face. It doesn’t take a mathematician to deduce that every face is just one of a billion variations. That’s a lot of possibilities but by no means infinite. Will the same come to pass of the universe itself? Will our comprehension of the cosmos become so coherent that even it becomes finite and quantifiable? Probably not in our lifetime, especially as life itself is not infinite either, like that of our fictional Vampires.

So what is infinite? Is it merely the philosophical? Dreams? Aspirations? The creativity of man? I do not know, but I can tell you this much. Infinity is a precursor, a huge magnet that draws us in and fuels our imagination. Infinity is what made that man on the beach build his boat and set sail. Infinity is what inspires astronomers and engineers to build bigger and more complicated telescopes. Infinity is a bank balance we’d all like to see when we put our card in the ATM.

But most of all, infinity is perhaps an elusive goal. Infinite energy, endless food supplies, unlimited resources….. would these things not solve a great many of humanities problems? Perhaps one day, infinite will only be a word used to describe the imaginary or just how small minded a race we once upon a time were….

]]>https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/08/the-ever-shrinking-infinite/feed/0thcsew8pf5technicalbobNew Year, no fear…https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/01/new-year-no-fear/
https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/01/new-year-no-fear/#respondSun, 01 Jan 2017 23:31:12 +0000http://technicalbob.wordpress.com/?p=47Well new year is upon us once again. A time to drink and be merry, to look forward and dream and to look back and remember. All are equally important, in moderation.

I’ve set myself a few very simple resolutions this time. I seldom bother at all as if something is worth doing, or desperately needed in life; quitting smoking or going on a diet then you should do it regardless.

The first is the reason you can even read this, to simply write more. Instead of trying to write the perfect novel on the first try I’ve realised the truth that you only get good at something with practice, waiting for the right moment or the right inspiration achieves nothing but wasted time.

The second is a bit more difficult. The clue is in the title, new year no fear. I’d like to be less afraid. That’s a broad statement, I know. Fear comes in all sorts of forms from all kinds of situations. Just in the last few days, one of my personal worst fears came true whereupon I put my bare foot into my slipper and felt something touch my toes as I walked into another room. I investigated to find a house spider inside and pretty much threw my slipper across the room whilst screaming like a little girl. I could probably get over my fear of spiders if I faced it head on and forced myself to come into contact with them. The human brain is an amazing machine that can adapt and cope with all kinds of things after all. I’m just not sure I want to, I’m not scared of them as I believe they can hurt me. I find the thought of them crawling on my skin, with all those spindly legs, to be what gives me the creeps and I’m not sure if I can cure that as I did a parachute jump once and still have a lingering dread of the feeling of falling.

On a different note, mental health is a big issue these days with stress and anxiety becoming ever more prevalent in society. Its hard not to get anxious in the world we have created for ourselves where everything revolves around the pursuit of money. I suffer anxiety from time to time, by no means to the extent that some unfortunate folk do, but enough to leave me panicked about things over which I have no control and triple checking everything over which I do have control. I see myself doing it, obsessively reconfirming things to myself and even I think I’ve gone a bit mad. That’s the bit I’d like to work on, to keep telling myself to get better, not worse. If only every ones problems were so easily solved.

]]>https://technicalbob.net/2017/01/01/new-year-no-fear/feed/0851bbd045c3ff7f3cdc7909561b791d6technicalbobConfessions of a Sugar Addicthttps://technicalbob.net/2016/02/15/confessions-of-a-sugar-addict/
https://technicalbob.net/2016/02/15/confessions-of-a-sugar-addict/#respondMon, 15 Feb 2016 15:58:02 +0000http://technicalbob.wordpress.com/?p=43It’s been all over the news that it’s not fat that clogs your arteries and leaves the fatty deposits, it’s sugar. My fiancée has been trying to convince me for months that I’m addicted to sugar and I need to cut down. Having just read about sugar addiction on the Internet I’m inclined to agree. The experts are reluctant to compare sugar addiction with other more notable addictions but I’m going to give it a go.
1. I hide chocolate from my significant other. You probably have to hide stuff from your kids so they don’t scoff it before you can. I have to hide my snacks so she can’t gauge how much I have in stock.
2. I buy her sweets to make it more acceptable for me to eat them when we are together.
3. I use supermarket offers (usually 3 for 2 or similar) to buy our sweets and eat the third chocolate bar on the way home to present ‘our chocolate bar each’
4. Combine points 2 and 3 together to say I buy sweets for my Mrs in order to lessen the expense of my own habit whilst making my habit more acceptable in her eyes. Devious, I know.
5. Lack of sugar makes me go on a roller coaster of emotions from spaced out to angry!
6. Too much sugar makes me go on a roller coaster of emotions from spaced out to angry.
7. I once ate half a terry’s chocolate orange, arranged it back in the packet so it looked whole still to buy time before replacing it with a new one and hiding the evidence by scoffing it!

So yeah. I’m cutting down on sugar. But slowly. A little at a time. It’s dangerous to go cold turkey. So far I’m down to one sugar in my coffee and less chocolate per day. I hope we’ve all learned a lesson today. Now, where did I leave those sweet, sweet grapes?

]]>https://technicalbob.net/2016/02/15/confessions-of-a-sugar-addict/feed/0too-much-sugartechnicalbobsugar-addiction-perpetual-cycle.pngValentine’s dayhttps://technicalbob.net/2016/02/13/valentines-day/
https://technicalbob.net/2016/02/13/valentines-day/#commentsSat, 13 Feb 2016 22:22:03 +0000http://technicalbob.wordpress.com/?p=35All week I’ve been listening to people telling me that Valentine’s Day is a made up holiday, it’s just created by the marketing companies to sell cards and chocolate. Funnily enough, I’m inclined to agree.
I was shopping at the supermarket on this very, Valentine’s eve and what should I see, men of all ages buying flowers, cards and chocolates. Well, if it is a made up holiday just to sell stuff, it’s working at least on these last minute shoppers without an ounce of originality or romance between them.
I got to thinking that maybe Valentine’s is a load of rubbish and that we shouldn’t be bothered with it. Watching these guys picking up the chocolates strategically placed by a supermarket worker made me realise that lots of women will wake up tomorrow to the exact same box of chocolates and an
almost identical bunch of flowers.
This led me to wonder if it’s the holiday that sucks or the people that ‘celebrate’ it. This year I’m getting married and so we decided we didn’t need valentine’s day. I still got my other half a card tho. I went on funkypigeon and made a personalised card, took me ten minutes from start to finish, including writing a short, silly poem and I never even had to leave my chair. It was lazy and yet it was highly appreciated (I was a bit pleased with it and made her open it early) and it was cheaper than most of the generic cards on offer in stores.
My gripe is this, you don’t need to wait for one particular day to be romantic and if you are going to wait for that day make more of an effort than picking up what what your local store has laid out in its foyer. The Internet gives you access to a whole world of creative people that, with just a little info, will make you a personalised gift your other half will love. Then buy her some chocolate too, you know, because women love chocolate!
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