"I just like to put my hands up in the air/ I want that girl dancing over there," Taio Cruz says on the intro of David Guetta's new single. While we're sure neither of them would have a problem scoring with the ladies solo, the idea of the pair on a lads' night out together sounds, in our heads, like the perfect double act - one woos with his shape-throwing while the other charms with his smooth lines.

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Unfortunately, the reality of their paring-up is far less enticing. "Look at her go on the dance floor/ She's amazing on the dancefloor," Cruz continues over trance-lite synths before ushering his chosen lady to "go, little bad girl" to a by-numbers club-pumping beat on the chorus. The result is more synthetic than a Geordie Shore lass made up for a night on the lash - and about as effective as their patented Slutdrop.