Objectives ~ Review the characteristics of BPD ~ Compare and contrast BPD with addictive behaviors ~ Examine ways to implement the activities presented in the book in a group format Characteristics of BPD ~ Poorly developed, or unstable self-image, often associated with excessive self-criticism ~ Difficulty recognizing the feelings & needs of others ~ Interpersonal hypersensitivity (i.e., prone to feel slighted or insulted) ~ Perceptions of others tend to focus on negative attributes or vulnerabilities.

Characteristics of BPD ~ Intense, unstable, and conflicted close relationships, marked by mistrust, neediness, and fear of abandonment ~ Close relationships ~ Viewed in extremes of idealization and devaluation ~ Alternating between over involvement and withdrawal.

Effects on Others ~ Feeling inadequate despite best efforts to appease ~ Lack of emotional boundaries ~ Responsible for the parent’s happiness ~ Guilt for personal happiness ~ Difficulty trusting people due to alternations between feeling appreciated and condemned ~ Anxiety because the parent was unpredictable ~ Hypervigilance I Never Knew It Had A Name ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Discuss the function of each symptom for the parent ~ Have participants identify any behaviors they have which may also resemble that symptom ~ Review and refute the take-aways providing practical cognitive and interpersonal skills ~ Group Activity 2 ~ Stop & Think: The Lessons are Clear—Review and Refute All Grown Up ~ Examines the effects of the borderline personality on the living conditions ~ Chaos ~ Abuse and Neglect ~ Boundary Violations ~ Invalidation ~ Role Reversals ~ Looks are Everything ~ Keen Perception All Grown Up ~ 6 Seeds to Grow a Healthy Child ~ Support ~ Respect and Acceptance ~ Voice ~ Unconditional Love and Affection ~ Consistency ~ Security All Grown Up ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Examine each effect of the Borderline Personality ~ Discuss how each was present in the family of origin ~ Discuss how each is manifested in the client’s current life ~ Identify methods to eliminate those dysfunctional patterns All Grown Up ~ Group Activity 2 ~ 6 Seeds: Discuss how to use those 6 principles to ~ Reparent/nurture self ~ Nurture healthy relationships ~ Group Activity 3 ~ Stop and Think: Resiliency Builders Grieving a Lost Childhood ~ Understand the grieving process ~ Review messages received in childhood about dealing with losses ~ Identif losses and feelings associated with the dysfunctional childhood ~ Identify continuing issues with the borderline/addicted parent Grieving a Lost Childhood ~ Group Activity ~ Describe what you would have liked your childhood to be like ~ As a group, identify ways to translate that to present day.

Guilt, Responsibility & Forgiveness ~ Identify potential guilt-triggers for the adult child ~ Discuss how guilt works, and what the benefits/motivations for guilt may be ~ Identify and discusses different origins of guilt ~ Encourage identification of what can & cannot be controlled ~ Explore the issues of guilt and responsibility ~ Encourage participants to examine their beliefs related to forgiveness

Guilt, Responsibility & Forgiveness ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Complete an ABC worksheet exploring beliefs about guilt. ~ Dispute and Evaluate using the prompts in Stop and Think: Am I Guilty ~ Group Activity 2 ~ In the Reframing section, use the concepts about personal responsibility as group discussion starters

Guilt, Responsibility & Forgiveness ~ Group Activity ~ Stop and Think: Taking Ownership–Post these statements on the wall in the group room and refer to them when people are feeling powerless or not taking ownership ~ Group Activity ~ The F-Word: Under the section Why Forgive, there are 7 questions. Have the group process these questions. Overcoming Anger & Resentment ~ Examine the function of anger and how it works ~ Explore the many faces of anger ~ Discuss ways people cope with anger ~ Encourage people to think about what it means to them to let go of anger ~ Highlight the consequences of anger ~ Provide tools to start managing anger Overcoming Anger & Resentment ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Stop and Think: Reframe Triggers—For each statement, have group members identify an example of when they have felt that way, and use the reframing tools ~ Group Activity 2 ~ Identify the different manifestations of anger and effects of each Communicating and Setting Limits ~ Help clients find the right balance between what they need to do and what they feel like they “should” do when interacting with the BP ~ Develop practical tools for controlling the flow of communication and interaction ~ Use the metaphor of changing the dance from a waltz to a tango to illustrate the concept of changing the relationship ~ Write a personal Bill of Rights Communicating and Setting Limits ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Controlling the Flow: Identify ways that the BP (and others) may violate boundaries. Discuss ways to deal with this and associated feelings of anger, guilt etc. ~ Group Activity 2 ~ Define what a healthy relationship with a parent would look like, having each client identify the aspects important to them. Then learn to Tango. Communicating and Setting Limits ~ Group Activity 3 ~ Know Your Rights: For each right the author listed (and any you add) identify what that looks like; how to communicate these needs and wants and how to handle it if those rights are not respected. ~ Group Activity 4 ~ Identify BP triggers and their functions and ways to prevent triggering them without sacrificing self Communicating and Setting Limits ~ Group Activity 5 ~ Coping with Resistance & Rages— Role play using different validating phrases like those suggested on page 115. ~ Process after the role play what self-statements (also on page 115) were helpful in retaining composure ~ Note: This is an especially helpful activity to do and even re-do right before holidays or family gatherings. Reconstructing the Past: Assessing the Present ~ Examine the different roles people play in their families and how those roles may be being reconstructed in the present. ~ Encourage people to write their autobiography from a reporter’s lens to gain objective insight ~ Present the concept that our parents directly and indirectly communicate messages to us about who we are and should be ~ Challenge people to find positives in the pain ~ Introduce the concept of mindfulness

Envisioning Change Breaking Old Habits ~ Begin by asking clients to envision the future, while carefully avoiding simply choosing the opposite because it is opposite ~ Encourage people to start taking care of themselves ~ Review thinking errors such as personalization and polarized thinking ~ Discusse how to develop a change plan, prioritizing, maintaining motivation and including sufficient rewards Envisioning Change Breaking Old Habits ~ Group Activity 1 ~ Have each group member identify one change they are going to make this week and how they are going to do it. ~ Encourage the use of measurable goals and objectives ~ Identify the motivation/reason for making that change ~ Brainstorm and mitigate any obstacles.

Envisioning Change Breaking Old Habits ~ Group Activity 2 ~ Develop a thinking error journal and have group members fill it out for a week, then bring it back to group to process. Trust Yourself, Set Boundaries Build Self-Esteem ~ Examine what healthy boundaries look like and how to know if we have them ~ Discuss how to enforce boundaries ~ Begin to explore the concept of self esteem Putting It All Together ~ Encourages clients to remain aware of old behaviors creeping in and/or new behaviors falling away ~ Remind clients that change is a process that takes not only time, but support Don’t Forget ~ Like our YouTube channel to be alerted when we publish new videos and new CEUs ~ Use coupon code 1168SNIPES whenever you make a purchase from Newharbinger.com to receive a 25% discount on your order.

AllCEUs started providing affordable CEUs and counseling continuing education, including online ceus and webinar based counseling ceus, in 2006 to help counselors licensed by their state board of professional counseling or state board of alcohol and drug abuse access affordable counselor continuing education, meet their continuing education requirements and enhance their addiction or mental health counseling practice. Since then, other companies have joined the marketplace to provide lpc continuing education including quantumunitsed, ce4less, Aspira aspirace, tzkseminars, i-counseling, accessceu, CEUbynet, pdresources. AllCEUs pioneered the model of offering unlimited CEU packages for a flat rate. We also were the first to offer live webinars each week for $5 per counseling webinar. We pride ourselves on having the largest catalog, with well over 200 multimedia, online counseling CEU courses. AllCEUs is an approved continuing education provider by the Connecticut Certification Board, The Florida Certification Board, FCB, The Alcohol and Drug Abuse Counseling Board of Georgia, ADACB-GA, NAADAC, the association for addiction professionals, the Texas Board of Social Work, The Texas Board of Professional Counseling, The Texas Board of Marriage and Family Therapy, California Consortium of Addiction Programs and Professionals, the Florida Board of Social Work, Mental Health Counseling and Marriage and Family Therapy and many other boards. It is important to note that, in most states, CEUs are NOT required to be NBCC approved, and most states accept ceus which are NOT from an NBCC approved continuing education provider or ACEP. For specific information about which other approval bodies your state accepts, you can visit our approvals page: https://cdn1.allceus.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/NewStateApprovalChart2017-1.pdf which provides a summary and links to the documents of the various state licensing boards for counselors, therapists and social workers. For mental health counselors, social workers and marriage and family therapists in Florida, AllCEUs reports your counseling CEUs to CE Broker. Whether you are a LCSW, MSW, LMFT, LMFT LMHC, LPC, LPCC, LCPC, CCMHC, MHC, CADC, LADC, CAP, LCDC, recovery coach, psychotherapist, pastoral counselor, addiction counselor, substance abuse counselor, recovery specialist, behavioral health technician needing mental health or addiction counseling CEUs online, or wanting to get certified as an addiction professional, AllCEUs has a variety of affordable online counseling CEUs, online addiction counselor certificate training tracks and face to face training options. Our unlimited CE packages provide professional counselor continuing education (CEUs) in addiction counseling, transdisciplinary foundations of addiction counseling, screening and assessment, diagnosis, family therapy, pharmacology, psychopharmacology, case management, crisis intervention, counseling tools, dialectical behavior therapy, mindfulness, acceptance and commitment therapy, ethics, supervision, working with adolescents, and many more.