Retail workers. what do customers do that annoys you? (continued)

Comments

Today in my pretend shop I had my first rotten customer. This morning someone came rushing in asking me where the toilet was. Jeez, how hard is it to wee before you leave the house and then moderate your fluid intake. Saddo.

Not a customer then, just someone wanting to use the loo?

They would be buggered in my pretend shop, I wouldn't have a loo.

Nope he didn’t buy a thing. I don’t mind though as I’m starting to realise that customers are human too.

But if they are not buying anything then they are not a customer. Just a pretend human.

But pretend humans are pretend customers too. I think we should start treating them all with the same respect.
In my shop we are actively fighting for equality for all pretend people.

Do you stop them at the door to make sure they have their own bags?

No my shop is known for its generosity. They can help themselves to as many free pretend bags as they want. Fill your pretend boots you gorgeous purchaser of quality pretend goods I say.

Today in my pretend shop I had my first rotten customer. This morning someone came rushing in asking me where the toilet was. Jeez, how hard is it to wee before you leave the house and then moderate your fluid intake. Saddo.

Not a customer then, just someone wanting to use the loo?

They would be buggered in my pretend shop, I wouldn't have a loo.

Nope he didn’t buy a thing. I don’t mind though as I’m starting to realise that customers are human too.

But if they are not buying anything then they are not a customer. Just a pretend human.

But pretend humans are pretend customers too. I think we should start treating them all with the same respect.
In my shop we are actively fighting for equality for all pretend people.

Pretend equality for pretend people is all very well in the pretend outside world....but all you want in your pretend shop is pretend customers everyone else who is pretend can sod off, they don't pay your pretend rates, wages, bills, stock etc....all you want is the pretend customers, otherwise your pretend shop goes bye bye.

Today in my pretend shop I had my first rotten customer. This morning someone came rushing in asking me where the toilet was. Jeez, how hard is it to wee before you leave the house and then moderate your fluid intake. Saddo.

Not a customer then, just someone wanting to use the loo?

They would be buggered in my pretend shop, I wouldn't have a loo.

Nope he didn’t buy a thing. I don’t mind though as I’m starting to realise that customers are human too.

But if they are not buying anything then they are not a customer. Just a pretend human.

But pretend humans are pretend customers too. I think we should start treating them all with the same respect.
In my shop we are actively fighting for equality for all pretend people.

Pretend equality for pretend people is all very well in the pretend outside world....but all you want in your pretend shop is pretend customers everyone else who is pretend can sod off, they don't pay your pretend rates, wages, bills, stock etc....all you want is the pretend customers, otherwise your pretend shop goes bye bye.

Ah, but will your pretend shop treat pretend customers like lepers for leaving a lone can or packet at the pretend checkout?

No, our policy is to never treat pretend customers that harshly. We try to acknowledge that they aren’t all time wasting mentally impared saddo’s, and that sometimes even pretend customers make mistakes.

Ah, but will your pretend shop treat pretend customers like lepers for leaving a lone can or packet at the pretend checkout?

No, our policy is to never treat pretend customers that harshly. We try to acknowledge that they aren’t all time wasting mentally impared saddo’s, and that sometimes even pretend customers make mistakes.

You have never worked in a pretend shop have you? your pretend attitude to the way you treat customers won't last, you will revert back to normal pretend customer service, when you realise your pretend customers are just pretend ar*eholes most of the time.

Once, I told the manager that if some kid treating the place like a playground or a running track runs smack int a pallet, cage or another customer's trolley, I'm NOT taking any blame and that we should sue the parents.

Parents that let their children use microscooters etc inside the shop. Why? I remember one security guard asked a parent to get their child off their scooter. Parent yelled at him saying her child has rights to use a scooter. Since when has it been 'OK' for parents to let their children do this? There is a place for scooters etc and its called OUTSIDE!

Once, I told the manager that if some kid treating the place like a playground or a running track runs smack int a pallet, cage or another customer's trolley, I'm NOT taking any blame and that we should sue the parents.

How could you be blamed ? the company could only be blamed if they had broken H&S laws/ rules. and no you could not sue the parents.

Ah, but will your pretend shop treat pretend customers like lepers for leaving a lone can or packet at the pretend checkout?

No, our policy is to never treat pretend customers that harshly. We try to acknowledge that they aren’t all time wasting mentally impared saddo’s, and that sometimes even pretend customers make mistakes.

You have never worked in a pretend shop have you? your pretend attitude to the way you treat customers won't last, you will revert back to normal pretend customer service, when you realise your pretend customers are just pretend ar*eholes most of the time.

No, we would never miserably sneer at our pretend customers, nor would we overwhelm them with our authority by jangling our pretend keys in their general direction.

Once, I told the manager that if some kid treating the place like a playground or a running track runs smack int a pallet, cage or another customer's trolley, I'm NOT taking any blame and that we should sue the parents.

How could you be blamed ? the company could only be blamed if they had broken H&S laws/ rules. and no you could not sue the parents.

Had some kids, maybe 13/14 who came to the till, asking if we had something. Of course I helped him as best I could, but he kept calling me by my first name, which always feels weird when customers do that to me.

He asked what my name was, how long have you worked here Daniel? 6 years, I said..Do you like it here Daniel? I said yes I do.. then he asked How much do you get paid Daniel? I answered the last question with "That's none of your business! To which he made a smart arse comment of "Well you can't be getting much then!" His little mate kept telling him shut up throughout!

Had some kids, maybe 13/14 who came to the till, asking if we had something. Of course I helped him as best I could, but he kept calling me by my first name, which always feels weird when customers do that to me.

He asked what my name was, how long have you worked here Daniel? 6 years, I said..Do you like it here Daniel? I said yes I do.. then he asked How much do you get paid Daniel? I answered the last question with "That's none of your business! To which he made a smart arse comment of "Well you can't be getting much then!" His little mate kept telling him shut up throughout!

Customer. What size is this carpet runner as it does not say.
Me. Points. It’s here on the wrapper.
Customer. What length is it?
Me. Get tape measure and shows customer. It’s this long.
Customer. I want to know how wide it is.
Me. (Holds up runner) It’s this wide.
Customer. But I want to know how wide it is.
Me. It’s this wide (holding said carpet in front of her).
Customer. But I don’t know how wide it is.
Me. This is how wide it is (running my hand from one side to the other).

When she left with said runner there were 3 members of staff left shaking our heads and rolling our eyes.

Welcome to retail folks where every minute you lose the will to live 🤪

Customer. What size is this carpet runner as it does not say.
Me. Points. It’s here on the wrapper.
Customer. What length is it?
Me. Get tape measure and shows customer. It’s this long.
Customer. I want to know how wide it is.
Me. (Holds up runner) It’s this wide.
Customer. But I want to know how wide it is.
Me. It’s this wide (holding said carpet in front of her).
Customer. But I don’t know how wide it is.
Me. This is how wide it is (running my hand from one side to the other).

When she left with said runner there were 3 members of staff left shaking our heads and rolling our eyes.

Welcome to retail folks where every minute you lose the will to live 🤪

Customer. What size is this carpet runner as it does not say.
Me. Points. It’s here on the wrapper.
Customer. What length is it?
Me. Get tape measure and shows customer. It’s this long.
Customer. I want to know how wide it is.
Me. (Holds up runner) It’s this wide.
Customer. But I want to know how wide it is.
Me. It’s this wide (holding said carpet in front of her).
Customer. But I don’t know how wide it is.
Me. This is how wide it is (running my hand from one side to the other).

When she left with said runner there were 3 members of staff left shaking our heads and rolling our eyes.

Welcome to retail folks where every minute you lose the will to live 🤪

Hey, you lot. I've got ANOTHER idea for a game based on a supermarket shop floor;
Think the game CARMAGEDDON but instead of a car, it's a supermarket retail worker who's lost it completely and goes on a CARMAGEDDON style rampage with a trolley of stock they have to put out.
Now tell me none of you lot have ever wanted to ram a trolley full of stock or pallet lifter into somebody to make them listen?

Customer. What size is this carpet runner as it does not say.
Me. Points. It’s here on the wrapper.
Customer. What length is it?
Me. Get tape measure and shows customer. It’s this long.
Customer. I want to know how wide it is.
Me. (Holds up runner) It’s this wide.
Customer. But I want to know how wide it is.
Me. It’s this wide (holding said carpet in front of her).
Customer. But I don’t know how wide it is.
Me. This is how wide it is (running my hand from one side to the other).

When she left with said runner there were 3 members of staff left shaking our heads and rolling our eyes.

Welcome to retail folks where every minute you lose the will to live 🤪

What I have noticed when I was shopping this morning which I have witnessed as a superworker.

.Buying a load of general merchandise (kitchenware, bedding, bathroom stuff, homeware etc) then return them all. Why?
. Customers that don't start to load up their shopping onto the conveyor belt until there is none of the previous customer's shopping on there. That is what the dividers are for. This made the queues look longer than they actually are.

Customer. What size is this carpet runner as it does not say.
Me. Points. It’s here on the wrapper.
Customer. What length is it?
Me. Get tape measure and shows customer. It’s this long.
Customer. I want to know how wide it is.
Me. (Holds up runner) It’s this wide.
Customer. But I want to know how wide it is.
Me. It’s this wide (holding said carpet in front of her).
Customer. But I don’t know how wide it is.
Me. This is how wide it is (running my hand from one side to the other).

When she left with said runner there were 3 members of staff left shaking our heads and rolling our eyes.

Welcome to retail folks where every minute you lose the will to live 🤪

what's the problem, she obviously wanted the exact dimension rather than trying to remember how far apart your hands were.