Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Created: 05/03/13

Replies: 23

Posted May. 03, 2013
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admin

Join Date: 10/11/10

Posts: 369

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Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard? Why, or why not?

Posted May. 06, 2013
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barbluvstennis

Join Date: 07/16/11

Posts: 22

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

It's quite possible considering the depth of her dissatisfaction, that any major event (including an affair) could have been the catalyst for change...Her emotional needs were not being met and she was drifting through life.

Posted May. 06, 2013
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rebajane

Join Date: 04/21/11

Posts: 184

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I don't know. Although she was unhappy, she needed a catalyst and I am not sure she would have been able to leave without someone like Richard

Posted May. 06, 2013
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rosannes

Join Date: 01/29/13

Posts: 21

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I have to agree with everyone here. Richard was convenient. He was in the right place at the right time and willing to play. Laura probably wouldn't have done anything if he was there. He definitely was the catalyst.

Posted May. 06, 2013
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nancy f.

Join Date: 11/12/11

Posts: 5

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

As a psychologist, I must say I am constantly amazed at the number of clients who come for therapy that are very unhappy in their relationships, can talk for hours about unmet needs and yet not take action to move on. Their theory is, no matter who unfulfilling, that the current state is better than the unknown!

Spanky 2

Posted May. 06, 2013
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nancyk

Join Date: 05/06/13

Posts: 1

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I believe she would have left him but not for a while later. It took Richard and a possibility of "fresh love' to give her the reason to make the move. Very realistic I think.

Posted May. 06, 2013
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sweeney

Join Date: 05/24/11

Posts: 71

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I don't think that without some other type of action or catalyst, Laura would not have acted. It could have been something other than the affair--like something happening to her son and her husband not being sympathetic about it, or a financial crisis, should he have remained out of work for a longer period of time.

Sometimes you just need a v-8 bonk on the head to make you realize that you are unhappy and need to take action.

Posted May. 06, 2013
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kiml

Join Date: 05/19/11

Posts: 12

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I don't think that she would have left if she hadn't met Richard. Before she met Richard she wasn't happy in her marriage, but meeting Richard helped her to see that may be she could have a better life. I believe that the affair with Richard breathed new life into her. It was like she was sleepwalking through life before Richard. He awoke something inside her and gave her the courage to leave her husband.

Posted May. 06, 2013
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shirleyl

Join Date: 06/01/11

Posts: 18

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

No, but that weakness probably doomed the relationship with Richard. she was too weak to see Richard's fatal flaw of being able to follow through with her.

Posted May. 07, 2013
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bookworm58

Join Date: 03/30/13

Posts: 1

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I am not sure she would have left her marriage if she hadn't meet Richard. Laura was the type of person who went along with flow not rocking the boat. When Laura lost Eric she lost herself too and never really cared about anything just doing what others wanted not she wanted. Laura let herself be a slave and sorta of punching bag for Dan and his attitude and lack of compassion. When he lost his job it just didn't happen to him it was a life altering change for the entire family not just him. Dan is a very selfish man.

Posted May. 07, 2013
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mystinamarie

Join Date: 12/19/12

Posts: 37

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I do not think Laura would have left her marriage if she hadn't met Richard. Even having the strong, supportive relationship of a Lucy, an independent single woman in her life, didn't seem to give her the strength to leave on its own.

Posted May. 08, 2013
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kiml

Join Date: 05/19/11

Posts: 12

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Bookwarm58 states that "Laura was the type of person who went along with the flow". That is a good description of her character. I have known a few people in my life who were miserable in their marriages, but didn't have the courage to leave until someone new came along. It is easier to just go along with the flow if there isn't a new opportunity out their. It would be scary to be on your own after being married for many years. Even Richard couldn't understand how she could leave him if their wasn't another man involved.

Posted May. 09, 2013
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pennyp

Join Date: 03/22/12

Posts: 262

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I do think she would have done it on her own although it might have taken some time and perhaps some other event fo her to have this moment of clarity.

Posted May. 09, 2013
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terriej

Join Date: 07/28/11

Posts: 129

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Maybe. Richard was able to show her that real love could still exist and she could find it again. The meeting allowed her to feel real happiness again...something she hadn't felt in a long time.

Posted May. 09, 2013
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kathleenb

Join Date: 09/14/12

Posts: 72

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I think since she was diagnosed with clinical depression and was in therapy she would have had the help to see the need to leave Dan. (I hope I am remembering the right order in the book) But even still when her daughter went off to college that would have given her the impetus to leave her marriage. There is no way she could have any reason to stay with him without the kids. So my answer is yes, I think Laura would have eventually left Dan even without knowing Richard.

Posted May. 10, 2013
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RRO

Join Date: 07/18/11

Posts: 8

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I believe that Richard was the catalyst for Laura to leave the marriage. I've noticed that in a lot of static situations that aren't ideal, something needs to come along to give a person the push to make a change, and this applies to things other than relationships such as dead-end jobs, etc.

Posted May. 10, 2013
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wendyf

Join Date: 05/11/11

Posts: 20

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I really don't think she would have been able to leave the marriage or at least not right away. Meeting Richard made her reassess her life and her marriage. It was obvious that her husband had checked out of things regarding their life together. Sometimes we need something totally out of the ordinary to happen in order to make a change in our lives.

Posted May. 13, 2013
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judyw

Join Date: 06/13/11

Posts: 31

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Richard was the catalyst enabling Laura to leave her marriage. I think she would have reached the same conclusion about dissolving the marriage even without meeting Richard.

Posted May. 13, 2013
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Navy Mom

Join Date: 04/12/12

Posts: 183

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RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I think Laura would have left Dan just not as soon as she did. Talking with Richard gave her concrete actions that she could follow to end her marriage. I think she would have done this on her own, with Lucy possibly, or sought help because of her emotional breakdowns at work if it had not been Richard.

Posted May. 14, 2013
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marymargaretf

Join Date: 09/05/11

Posts: 33

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

Even though Richard disappointed Laura, he was the impetus for the decision to leave her unhappy marriage that had been smoldering for so long. I don't know if she would have made her move if they had not had their encounter.

Posted May. 14, 2013
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sharalynnep

Join Date: 12/04/11

Posts: 48

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I don't think Laura would have left. I think she needed someone like Richard to show her that she needed to move on with her life. I think if she hadn't met Richard and had the affair with him she would have continued to try to live in her unhappy marriage.

Posted May. 16, 2013
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sgh

Join Date: 06/19/12

Posts: 7

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I think it took strength for Laura to go to the conference, that was her first step. She needed a push and the conference started the ball rolling. Richard was another boost. You don't miss what you don't know .... In the affair with Richard it became crystal clear life could be lots better. And then she realized "wow" I am okay and can continue to be okay even with out Richard!

Posted May. 18, 2013
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swchis39

Join Date: 09/26/12

Posts: 46

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

I think she would have left the marriage eventually if it wasn't Richard it would have been someone else. After the 2 children were gone she would have had nothing to hold her to her loveless marriage.

Posted May. 20, 2013
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lynna

Join Date: 04/24/13

Posts: 14

RE: Would Laura have had the strength to leave her marriage if she hadn’t met Richard?

While Laura had a fair amount of self confidence as a mother and in her work, in her dealings with men, she was much more insecure and indecisive. She had compromised by marrying Dan in the first place, and had gone along with her unhappy marriage for so long, that I am not sure she would have had the confidence to leave him without some kind of special support or catalyst. If she had decided to get therapy, for example, or some other event which boosted her confidence had happened, then she might have left her marriage without her affair. But her encounter with Richard enabled her to see herself in a different way, and helped give her the courage to leave her marriage.