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Friday, November 11, 2016

When life hands you oranges...

I read a story once of two kids reaching for the last orange in the bowl at the same time. The kids started to protest because they both wanted the orange and it was the last one left. An adult swooped in, sliced the orange in half, and gave each child half of the orange. Both children still protested. As it turns out, one child wanted the peel so he could use the zest to make cookies. The other child wanted the fruit inside in order to make juice. Had there been a chance to talk about things, both children could have been satisfied. The adult in the story, however, didn't take the time to find out what either child actually needed and instead sought to head of a fight by cutting the fruit in half. Now each child is left with half of what they need.

I am guilty of these types of actions in my own home. My justification is always that it's much easier to stop the fight before it even begins. However, there have been a number of times that after jumping in to shut down the impending argument, I have found that my kids were only playing, or pretending, or not getting ready to fight at all. In those instances, I could see the confusion on their faces. They were getting yelled at for playing.

Even if my children are getting ready to fight, I recognize that my jumping in to solve the problem will still do more harm than good 95% of the time. People need to learn how to argue; how to negotiate; how to make their voices heard. There will not always be a time when someone else can swoop in and "solve" the problem. And often the problem isn't what outsiders think it is.

I've had a tough week. I think our entire country has. I spent a good deal of Tuesday crying and bemoaning the election results. In many ways, I really do still feel that way. I think our country would have been better served if the results had gone the other way. However, obviously half of our country does not think that.

So now it is time to listen. I know some good, ethical, compassionate people that voted opposite me. I know that they voted for their own reasons. I don't completely understand their reasons, but I know for a fact that they didn't cast their votes in the hopes that people would be hurt. They voted because they believe that Mr. Trump has ideas that will make our country better off.

I am an idealistic person. I believe in the fundamental good of people. I believe in our government and the way it is set up. I believe that someone can get good results from a method completely opposite the one I have chosen. I, personally, am choosing to give Trump the benefit of the doubt, hear him out and trust that we can survive the next four years.

The government controls our laws, but it does not control our hearts. We, the people can still fight for the disenfranchised, lonely, hurting, and oppressed. Our country is founded on liberty and freedom for all and it's up to us to make sure that happens. Just because our fight just got harder, does not mean we give up and throw in the towel. Giving up just lets the other side win.

In life we are often dealt a rotten hand. There is not much point in stomping our feet and throwing a hissy fit. The better option is to look at what we have, reaffirm where we want to go, and forge a new path. When it comes to the unexpected or to change, we have to acknowledge what we have and move forward in the direction we want to go. When life hands you oranges, you have to acknowledge that someone else might use them in a way you weren't expecting and still create something good..

I fully acknowledge the fact that some people voted for Trump because they are misogynistic, xenophobic, homophobic trolls. These people are wrong. No matter which way you present it, this line of thinking does not lead to the betterment of our country. These people are just as idiotic as the people who voted for "your mom" or Harambe the gorilla.

I'm linking up with Kristy at Finding Ninee for Finish the Sentence Friday. The prompt was "When it comes to the unexpected or to change..." You can see all the entries here.