Britney Spears Turns to Michael Jackson For Parenting Tips

TROUBLED Britney Spears is in the Star. In “BRITNEY: WACKO IS PERFECT DAD”, readers learn that Troubled Britney has turned to Michael Jackson for parenting advice.

The message is clear: if you look like an iffy parent, not all that good with children, seek out someone who seems worse. Ian Huntley is in jail. Britney turns to Jackson.

As Britney is said to have told a source: “He never lost his kids.”

And: “Britney is hoping he might be able to help her out. And, of course, a few days out of the limelight at Neverland would also be revealing break.”

Neverland is Jackson’s former home in California. It offers sanctuary to Britney. As the Star reports, she is only able to spend one night a week with her two sons. And what better place to share their limited time together than at the former main residence of a man who hung onto his family despite dangling little Blanket over a balcony and facing child abuse allegation (not guilty)?

The kids will love it. But if the little Spears don’t fancy the trip in mum’s car, Britney could always borrow from her parenting mentor and hire a couple of stage school children or dwarves and equip them with head scarves and blankets.