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So what is Easter? The start of spring? Easter eggs and the Easter bunny. Baskets filled with candy? What a strange group of things bloomed out of a holiday of faith. I guess Christmas is not much better. Santa Clause and Christmas trees? All of these have a history and although they are probably harmless, they tend to water down and distort the true basis for the holidays.

So what does Easter mean to me? A few facets of my faith and feelings about Easter without the churchy talk:

Easter gives me purpose

If it was not for my faith, I would live, gather and die like everyone else and that would be it. My goals would be focused on the relatively short period that we inhabit the Earth and would concentrate on accumulating, enjoyments and self-focus. However, I know there is more. The Bible says that we are wired for eternity. We know there has to be more. While this life can be great at times, there is also a lot of pain that goes along with it. We live in a world without real order. Without things being fair or honest. A jumbled up mess. I am looking forward to order and justice. A place where everything is right. Easter reminds me that there is a place that is right and this is but a stop along the way.

Easter helps me belong

I belong to the largest family that has ever existed. A family of people who think alike. A family with a vision of what true life is all about. That takes care of one another. That helps you when you are down. A family that puts others ahead of themselves.

Easter means all things are new

Easter is like the morning. A new day has begun. Yesterday was tough. I screwed up. I made some stupid mistakes. But then the sun comes up. And it is a new day. A new start. The old is gone and the new is here. Easter washes away the dirt of the past and makes all things new. Like a shiny penny. The way it should be.

Easter gives me focus

The opportunity to get my mind off of myself. To really see others and their needs first. To love others more than myself. Easter gives me an orientation where I am no longer the center of my universe. I can focus on others and I can stop thinking about my situation, wants and needs.

Easter is peace

I can relax in the realization that I do not need to worry. I do not need to try to do it all. I do not need all of the answers. I can trust. I can let things go. I do not have to guide and control. I can relax. It will be fine. I will be fine. This is the basis of faith.

I will admit that I am still a work in progress. I still struggle sometimes, but I know when I look back I see progress. When I look forward, I see a path. The Easter message is one of hope. It is a message of love. And purpose, belonging, renewal, vision and peace.

I hope you can see this and truly grasp the power of the Easter message.

The mind has a way of legitimizing and reinforcing our behavior. We think that our motivations are pure. We are acting in a righteous way. For others. Not ourselves. We are selfless. But is this really true?

We also have a way of running an interior narrative that reinforces this reality. We can truly convince ourselves that we value something when the facts actually completely contradict this belief. The complete opposite of what we think.

The difference is reality and reality is found in action. We will DO what is important to us. You can’t fool action. You can tell people that you value or care about something, but what are you doing about it? If you are not acting it’s just talk.

Folks run their mouths about helping the poor and donate absolutely nothing. The environmentalist drives a Suburban. The wife says she loves her husband but spends more time talking to her girlfriends and keeping up her super mom image. The husband who says he is a devoted dad but spends his weekends playing golf.

Examine your action VERY carefully. What do you do? What are your actions? Day in day out, what is your true motivation? You may disguise it as altruist, charitable, for others- but is it really? Often, its really all about you and what you truly care about.

The way that you look to others.
Your image.
Your reputation with others.

There is a passage in the Bible that talks about praying loudly on the corner and praying silently in a private place. The public display is all about you. You have received your reward. The private display is the only pure motivation.

Is your action about the return? Even what looks charitable or caring? What I GET for my GIVE. Will I get something in return for my actions? Will people think i’m just so amazing for what I did?

You can fool yourself into thinking all of your actions are for others. Pump yourself up. But you are lying to yourself. Examine yourself closely. Are you doing it for your image? Or for your pride!

Do it in private. Do it for someone who doesn’t think you are amazing. Do it for someone who doesn’t even show ANY appreciation for it.

If not- you might be simply fooling yourself!

So what do you think? Do we tell ourselves a story that may be completely false? Can we truly fool ourself? Click on “Leave a Comment and tell me what you think!

Wake Up Sleeper!

Last weekend I made a quick trip to Salt Lake City to ski with a friend from work. The schedule was to fly in, ski two days and fly back. A quick trip. I have never been to Salt Lake City. Along with that, I had not experienced the breathtaking beauty of the Wasatch Mountains.

We had a little time on Monday before our flight so we had the opportunity to visit Antelope Island which is an island located in the Great Salt Lake. It was a cold morning and it has snowed overnight so the area was blanketed with a light covering of snow.

The views were fantastic! Although the island had few visitors, we did notice visitors taking pictures of the amazing scenery. The best word I could come up to describe what we saw is majesty.

When I see something that I would call majesty, I think of the hand of the Creator. The potter and the clay. The architect and builder of our amazing planet.

There is a verse in the Bible that says that we have no excuse to be ignorant of the hand of the Father. Creation screams His name. I cannot believe that all of this beauty was created by chance or by accident.

I asked my friend if he felt that looking at the mountains each day would dull this feeling of majesty. He quickly told me no. He believed that the mountains and the beauty would never get old. They would retain their power over anyone who looked their way.

So the key is to look! Look for His hand. Look at what He made. Look at what He does in your life. Look at the way He blesses you.

An accident, good luck or chance? Can’t be. Chance does not have this order. Chance does not have this variety and beauty. Chance does not produce majesty. Chance is not this good. Not even close!

LOOK and wake up sleeper!

So what do you think? Can you see His hand in creation? Do you think this world was created by chance? Click on “Leave a Comment” and tell me what you think!

I coached youth basketball when my kids were young. I loved the game and I love kids so it was a great match for me. Basketball is a perfect mix of skill and strategy. This was also evident in the kids. Some where great athletes and some made it through being smart and working hard. I was a student of the game. I studied and observed different defenses and offenses and also what made up good mechanics and personal skills. While I was the teacher when it came to basketball, I learned some valuable lessons that have been ingrained into the way I manage people and the way I look at the world. Yes, these are big statements, but they are true. I still go back to these truths and use them for teaching moments when I am mentoring or problem solving.

Here are these truths:

Talent Blindness: Some coaches are great at judging talent but most are not. The reason is not because they are not skilled or unintelligent- they are human. We have a very tough time being completely objective. Coaches will tend to provide preference to the kids they like. The kids that make them feel good. The kids of the parents they like. The same can be true in the business world. We provide preference to the folks that are like us. The ones that make us feel comfortable. The ones that make us feel good about ourselves. We can be so talent blind! We judge talent based on how we see the world and how we feel. We can easily miss a diamond because they are different, peculiar and not like us.

Another Set Of Eyes: When I was coaching, I would sometimes get caught up in concentrating on the nuances of the offense and defense and miss big things that were going on. Sometimes I would leave kids in the game too long. Sometimes I would miss that a particular player had a hot hand and was scoring and I would inadvertently pull them out of the game. Its hard to watch everything. No really its impossible. I valued my assistant coaches to speak up and set me straight. In business, we can miss the big picture while we are drilling down on particular issues. I must have a group that I empower to tell me whats really going on and have the guts to confront me when I am doing something stupid. A support group. A few trusted advisors to help us avoid getting caught up in the game.

Emotion Cloud: I struggled with the referees. Kind of a lot. They were often times volunteers and high school kids and their skill level varied. Some were pretty good and some were just horrible. I remember throwing my clipboard on the gym floor of an auxiliary gym once in the middle of a game and then- the gym went completely silent! Not a shining moment for me but a great lesson. You just can’t let emotion take over. People will let you down and do things that are wrong and out of line. You can count on it. It’s how you react that matters. Once I let emotion rule, my head goes to mush and all I got is to fire back. A poor example of leadership no matter where you are. Keep your cool and keep your head!

These are a few of the valuable lessons that I learned while coaching. It’s funny how I consistently learn while teaching others! Learning just never ends. I am always seeking the lesson in things that happen to me. How about you? Are you learning as you go? Do you see the world as a giant classroom? Stay alert to things going on around you. You will be better for it. I promise!

So what do you think? Have you learned while you are teaching? Did this story remind you of a lesson your learned? Click on “Leave A Comment” and tell me what you think!

John is a real charmer. He is good at getting what he wants. First it was a cookie from Mom. Then an extension on an assignment at school. Then a date with the homecoming queen. A promotion at work. You get the picture. He was attractive and engaging. He found it easy to win people over. It was his “go to” when he was in a tough spot or if he really needed something. It was John’s secret weapon.

So are charm and good looks the keys to influence?

A big smile and just the right witty responses and we can be rewarded with instant engagement. I have watched it over and over again. Some people are simply masters at it. They have a way of pulling you in. They have a special power that you just can’t explain.

I have never been much of a charmer. I am more of a “tell it like it is” kind of guy. There are times that I wished I had this mysterious power over people. I think it can be a gift. I also think there are dangers here.

People who use charm to get what they want often abuse the power. They begin to believe that they have the ability to get whatever they want. They have seen it work over and over again. They begin to feel invincible.

Leaders can fall into this trap. The smile. The endearing comments. Charmers make you feel important and valuable. Soon you find yourself doing whatever they ask. Eventually, however, you will begin to see through the charm. You will get a glimpse of their heart- either good or bad. Charm can be a real smoke screen.

Just like that date who has only one thing in mind- the truth will come out. If you truly care for your team, employees, friends…. they will figure it out. It’s a heart issue. You simply can’t hide it for very long.

If you are a charmer- be careful! You may have honed your skills when you were young and the stakes were not all that important. You were a popular kid. Captain of the whatever team. There is nothing inherently wrong with being charming and engaging- unless the goal is to manipulate to get what you want. Unless the goal is not the common goal. Maybe it’s just your goal?

Sincerity is built through action. You will have a difficult time convincing someone of your sincerity with just talk. The fact is- they are watching you! They know where your treasure lies by your actions. You are not fooling anyone. The smoke will eventually clear- it always does.

So what do you think? Have you been charmed and later found out the truth? Have you seen this in action before? Click on “leave a comment” and tell me what you think!

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What is Leading By Serving?

We are all leaders. We lead families, friends, workmates, and we lead by example. Leadership is not about position. A leader seizes the opportunity to make a difference. They lead from where they are. In this space, I share stories and life lessons on grabbing hold of these opportunities. Making an impact. Changing the world.