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“I loved this newsletter. It's great how you break down us readers' resistances to taking care of ourselves, and do it with such a sweet and gentle voice with that touch of humor. Questions like those are excellent tools for re-focusing; getting back on track with what's important and letting go of what's not.”

- Ella Jolly, Social Worker
New York City

Curiosity, meet my body. Body, meet Curiosity.

I want to share something about curiosity and the body, because I’m in a sharing kind of mood, and I’m wondering if you can relate : )

Recently, I’ve watched myself want to KNOW and FIX what ails me or what I wish to improve. I’ve also noticed how

tense
cold
constricted
forceful

my body and mind become when I approach both doing and receiving bodywork from this place. And while knowing about something and being able to fix it are certainly useful and necessary parts to solving any problem, the energy behind the drive to know and fix is often quite dense, linear, anxious, and even compulsive.

To be quite blunt, these are qualities that can (especially if unbalanced by qualities I mention below) make the act of healing and relaxing not only less enjoyable, but slower than any of us would like.

The energy of know and fix can actually block our ability to understand how it is we actually want to feel, and to take it a step further to imagining and sensing what that would be like. “I want to feel better” is a great start, but “better” could be more specific (and specificity helps).

Something we practice in the TRAGER Approach world is the art of inquiry; inquiring about how we’d like to feel and getting specific. We wonder if something can feel lighter, more beautiful, more playful, easier. As we wonder and inquire, space opens in our minds, which directly translates to our body, giving our body a chance to be curious, too, and feel its way to better. To taste what these lovely sensations might feel like.

—

So back to my original quandary. In an attempt to know and fix my desire to know and fix (hee hee), I got CURIOUS. I got curious about how and why I do this. I started to wonder if there might be a different way of being with a client, or being on the table, or just being with myself, moment to moment.

Not only IS there a different way, but the energy of curiosity, that state of wonder it put me in, felt

spacious
warm
connected
limitless
timeless.

In that mindset, there was plenty of time to receive, plenty of answers, plenty of ways to solve problems more effortlessly and feel better and better.

What a relief!

—

In my very brief study of the “History of Curiosity,” it appears that curiosity is something that has been relegated to children, cats (we all know what happens to curious cats…), “Curious George,” the adorable, trouble-making monkey of children’s book fame, and people or situations we deem a bit strange or bizarre.

In short, it seems the stories we are told about curiosity are that a) it’s something associated with children and cute, furry animals, and b) it can cause a lot of trouble and mishap. It’s unruly, unwise, and reeks of something close to naïveté. It’s different and challenging to comprehend.

“I think, at a child’s birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Thank you, Mrs. Roosevelt! When we approach the body in the spirit of curiosity, the game changes. It actually becomes a game in the best sense of the word. And yes, it takes guts to be curious, because being curious means admitting that you don’t know (perhaps one of the hardest things for most adults to do). It means letting go of plans, timelines, and rigid strategies to try to force or push something into existence. It means consciously walking in to the unknown and allowing yourself to flow and respond to the current.

—

This is a big topic, and one that stretches far past the borders of our physicality. I can personally say that there is a lot to play with here and a lot to explore.

If you feel this way, too, or even if you are just curious about it, I will leave you with this intention to play with:

I am curious.
I am curious!
My body and mind open to possibilities,
known and unknown,
for healing.

What does this part of me need? How would it like to feel?
I remember that I am a conduit for healing, of myself and others.
I invite the sensations of lightness, ease, spaciousness, and warmth.

When I open myself to curiosity,
there are enough solutions,
there is enough time,
and there is limitless potential to feel better and better.
There is potential to feel even a little better, right now.

I’m honored you’ve read this far, and I hope something in here sparks something new, fresh, and useful for you to play with and experience in your life and body. Thank you for being part of this process with me.

With love + curiosity,
Helena

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