Gifting Matters in Friendship?

Editor’s Note: When gifts become the crux of a friendship, then is it worth nurturing this bond? And probably when this beautiful relationship begins to get measured through the quality and the quantity of gifts, it is best to move on. What do you think? Share with us here. Our member BerryPine shares her views.

I was living abroad till last year since my wedding and missed lots of family functions and friends weddings. One of my good friend(Y) stopped talking to me for two reasons.

I Didn’t Gift Her Anything

Instead I sent money to my Z friend (male) to get gift for Y from “this” shop “that” product as i already checked via internet and transferred him the money. We are a group of friends,where few already got married and left and so there has been shortage of money for Y wedding gift. So Z put “my” gift money altogether and has bought a common gift and gifted her. Which he did not inform me. I came to know from his friend. I was angry,but couldn’t do anything I can give Y a personal gift when I visit India I thought.

I Did Not Meet Her After Her Wedding During My Vacations

When I visited India and called her to meet in person all she said was she is busy all the days and she will try to meet. I didn’t force her because she was living with in-laws. My vacations was for just 2 weeks and so I couldn’t meet her anytime and flew back.

Though I called her and wished her before and after wedding and expressed her how badly I missed her wedding she still gradually stopped responding to my emails. Then she didn’t even inform me about her pregnancy, But I congratulated her. I also spoke to her husband after her delivery. I totally forgot about the “gift” part.

After my delivery my DH mailed all my friends about the good news. She didn’t bother to wish me or my family. And today I was talking to my close friend and she told me those reasons. I was totally shocked-surprised and felt guilty.

She could have asked me “hey monkey where is the gift????” But she has silently developed a sort of antipathy towards me.

Do I need her back?? I don’t know,but for sure I should send her some gift now. Right now!

This may sound silly,I am feeling so bad.It has been 4+ years and I never thought gifts would be so important that it can even break close friendship.

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