20 Seriously Strange U.S. Sex Laws

Every once in a while we get the distinct pleasure of hearing about some whacked-out law that’s still on the books from Anytown, USA. We all snicker, wonder how the law got there in the first place and then go back to ignoring the laws we find inconvenient.

Now most of us are law-abiding citizens, at least in the bedroom…or so we thought.

According to FoxNews.com, the United States has more laws on the books regulating sexual behavior than all the European countries combined!

Take a look at the totally wacky U.S. sex laws that potentially make you a bedroom outlaw – after the jump!

California 1 of 20

It's illegal to have sex with Satan in Bakersfield, CA without a condom. If you've ever been to Bakersfield you know this could totally happen. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Nevada 2 of 20

If you're a member of the Nevada legislature (and so many of you are), stop conducting business matters in that penis costume of yours. It's totally going to land your ass in jail. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Maryland 3 of 20

Kissing for more than a minute is illegal in Halethorpe, MD. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Hey, good people of Newcastle, WY, stop having sex in walk-in meat freezers! It's illegal, not to mention just a tad nippy. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Washington, D.C. 6 of 20

If you've ever felt screwed by the government you probably ought to know sexual intercourse in any position other than missionary is illegal in Washington, D.C. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Georgia 7 of 20

It's OK to have Georgia on your mind but you better not have sex on your agenda unless you're married. That's right, single nookie is prohibited. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Mississippi 8 of 20

Gentlemen of Mississippi, stop promising ladies you'll marry them to get in their pants. This smooth move might land you behind bars. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Alabama 9 of 20

If ever there was a reason to move out of Alabama, it was this: sex toys are illegal, y'all. Illegal. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Illinois 10 of 20

Don't even think about having sex while hunting and fishing on your wedding day in Oblong, IL because that would be illegal. Personally, I think hunting or fishing on your wedding day ought to be illegal, but what do I know. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Idaho 11 of 20

In Idaho you're breaking the law if you kiss in public for more than 18 minutes. In other words, get a room. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Minnesota 12 of 20

If you live in Minnesota you best not get it on with a live fish. For those of you wondering, dead fish are totally OK. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Wisconsin 13 of 20

For those of you sexing it up in Connersville, WI, you probably ought to know it's illegal for a man to fire a gun while his partner reaches orgasm. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Utah 14 of 20

If you're having sex with animals in Utah, you better not be doing it for money, because that would be illegal. The more you know. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

California 15 of 20

An old law in California once made it illegal to climax before your partner during foreplay. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Texas 16 of 20

You're flirting with lawful disaster if you're flirting in San Antonio, TX where it's illegal to do so. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Washington 17 of 20

It's illegal in Washington state to have sex with an animal weighing over 40 lbs. You've gotta love a state with standards. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

North Carolina 18 of 20

Sex in a graveyard is illegal in North Carolina, so stop it already. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Minnesota 19 of 20

Stop sleeping naked if you live in Minnesota where the temperature ranges from 13 degrees to 73 degrees Fahrenheit because it's illegal. And humid. And mostly illegal. Source Image credit: Shutterstock

Friends, these wacky U.S. sex laws are only the beginning. Check out what other sex laws you’re probably breaking on the regular at Marie Claire, The Frisky, and FoxNews.com. And one more thing: ignorance is not a viable defense in a court of law. Happy sexing!

Which wacky U.S. sex law is your favorite?

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