Lindsay Lohan went to jail for her DUIs yesterday, serving about 84 minutes of hard time. (Two more minutes than Nicole Richie!) Now we can call her an ex-con. [TMZ]

Amy Winehouse's tour manager quit! Thom Stone said working for Winehouse was hazardous to his health: He claims doctors found heroin in his system and he must have "inhaled it passively" on Amy's tour bus. Uh, is that even possible? [Daily Mail]

Right before she bombed on stage on Wednesday, Amy Winehouse locked herself in the bathroom and sobbed uncontrollably, saying she couldn't go on without her husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, there. [Mirror]

Also, did Amy pull something out of her beehive and snort it??? [The Sun]

Angelina Jolie's adoption of an Ethiopian baby was legal, the agency involved confirms. "The grandmother brought three witnesses to court who testified that Zahara's mother had died and that her father was unknown," the head of the agency says. He also claims reporters paid relatives to raise the dispute: "The controversy is media hype by unethical journalists exploiting the poverty of the grandmother." Who would do such a thing? CoughInTouchCough. [Reuters]

Mr. Big got someone knocked up! Sex And The City star Chris Noth is gonna be a baby daddy: His girlfriend Tara Wilson is about 5 months pregnant. [Page Six]

Lance Armstrong has a statement to make! "Ashley Olsen and I are strictly friends. We have hung out amongst other friends, and she strikes me as a nice, smart lady." Sheryl Crow has a statement, too! "Lance and I are friends. What he does in his personal life... is none of my business. Nor would I ever comment on it." Hmm, friends who are not in each other's personal lives? Does this mean she never said he was "pathetic," as Life & Style claimed? [Page Six]

Jessica Simpson spent her time as cohost on The View plugging her clothing line instead of discussing current events. Stick to what you know, honey! [Page Six]

Kim Kardashian says she posed nude for Playboy because "I'm not one of those stick-skinny girls you see. I felt like girls today need to see a normal body." Uh, Playboy is for girls? Good to know! [Rush & Molloy, 4th from bottom]

John Mayer: "I'm kind of a douchebag." Wow. To thine own self be true! [TMZ]

Paris Hilton is planning Nicole Richie's baby shower, but doesn't know what games to play or what gift to get. "She doesn't know if she's having a boy or a girl," says Paris. "I thought for sure she'd want to know, but she decided to wait." The party — with tunes by Sam Ronson — is happening Sunday at the Beverly Hills Hotel, in case you want to drop by. [E!]

Oh, and friends of Samantha Ronson are insisting that she is a good influence on Lindsay Lohan. "Sam has stopped Lindsay from destructive behavior in the past," says a source. Sam herself says, "Those who know me know the truth." [Page Six]

The Spice Girls performed at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show in "1950s-style military outfits" for one number and evening gowns for another. Reunited and it feels so good! [E!]

Actors from The Office and 30 Rock have been suspended on half-pay for five weeks. Some other networks are putting casts on unpaid hiatus. [Reuters]

We posted aboutLost stars Evangeline Lilly and Dominic Monaghan breaking up: Now the Hobbit has been seen smooching another woman. [Miami Herald]

Alicia Keys would like everyone to know she is not a lesbian. "I'm as straight as they come," she says. Now that that's cleared up, we can start our day. [The Sun]