A New Twist on Resolutions – How about parenting differently?

I’ve been there myself – along with most parents. How about a New Year’s resolution to parent differently?

Are you ready to be honest? Do you want to build upon the positives? Are you willing to transform your parenting? Can you make a commitment to change?

I’ll go first.

My daughter

After a decade of treatment, Ashley better understands her past trauma. Responses to stressful situations have become rational, less emotional. Now she wants to put that insight into her advocacy work. How can I help her succeed – which, in turn, will continue her healing? What is doable – not just for her but also for me? What local organizations would welcome her voice?

My oldest son

Addiction issues haunt my oldest son Alex. After much denial he’s openly admitted the problem to me. That’s a huge step in the right direction. Although his desire to stay clean is obvious, he easily loses focus and lands back in jail. He hangs with the wrong crowd, especially woman who fuel his habit. How can I reinforce his good intentions – without any shame? Would a daily text message uplift him?

My son who’s a young daddy

Travis’s plate is overflowing. Meanwhile, he’s slow to ask for advice but quick to request money when funds run short. He’s also slow to respond to a voice message or text – which gives him a feeling of control – followed by a convenient excuse when recovering from another poor choice. How can we identify a way to communicate? Would he actively use it?

My running son

Andrew wants to stay busy – on top of his running and high school speaking schedule. He likes being a role model and making a difference. Since being a teacher has been his goal for years – in spite of an intellectual disability, could he volunteer with kindergarteners or first graders? Can we find a supportive principal classroom teacher to welcome him? Would they provide the necessary guidance?

My up-and-down son

No two days are the same for Michael. Although his moods can swing quickly, he’s shown an increased ability to regulate his emotions – most of the time. He seems ready to try even harder. Can I encourage him to further recognize his triggers before losing self-control? Can I hold him more accountable? Should I give more time to pull himself together before letting him move on?

My youngest son

Following months of no luck, my youngest son Brandon found his first job. Unfortunately, the hours vary greatly. With his sleep cycle disrupted – and mine too since I drive him, he’s tired. This leads to frustration. How can I support my son’s work effort while maintaining expectations at home? Does he need more validation? Would that lead to positive conversations about being a man?

Now it’s your turn.

Where do you need to start? Can you build upon past success? Are you willing to parent differently?