Lies and Illusions

Well I don’t know where to begin on this one, um well there’s B movies and then there’s this, it has to be at best an F movie, F of course standing for Fucking bad! So Lies and Illusions was the movie I forced myself to finish and I was thinking ok Christian Slater and Cuba Gooding, Jr., it has to be decent! Well this proves just how far some people will go to make a buck.

First of all the whole story was just ridiculous, it really was just out there. Second the script was so weak it made tissue paper look like a steel I-beam, and the cheezy one lines were horrific. The fight scenes could have been better if you used turtles as stunt doubles, really this had to be some of the worst fight scenes I have ever seen! As one review I read afterwards said “The unchoriographed fight scenes between out-of-shape actors with no martial arts training looked like middle aged Power Rangers on Methadone.” It think that about clears it up. The sound effects for the guns was just atrocious. The soundtrack though out the entire film was so corny it takes what little bit of attention you had to the movie and throws it right out the window! Just think of the worst cover of a James Bond guitar riff you can think of and then multiply it by 10, then you’ll have a vague idea of how bad it was.

So to sum this whole film up it was one of the worst films I have ever seen and I have seen far superior acting in porno’s. If you go ahead and watch this movie after all this please hit yourself with a sledgehammer and down’t stop until Glen Beck come’s out of the closet. If you have already seen this movie and would like to join the support group I’m starting for people who have seen this movie please contact me and I will give you all the information.