Good people are everywhere I turn, and each has a story to tell. Here you will find some of mine. I encourage and welcome your comments!

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Friendship PART ONE

OK, love can wait a while. I have some thoughts spewing out of my mind and I'm the worst at keeping everything straight, focused or even remembered. So, the sooner I get this down, the better. Firstly, I want to thank Z for pointing out that this space is OK to use for healing therapy. I think perhaps that's part of the reason I'm here!

Have you ever put your foot in your mouth? I have several times, and the nature of doing so is such that you don't realize you've done or said anything wrong until it's pointed out to you. The neat thing about doing it though, is if you can look past the embarrassment factor, and as long as what you've said or done hasn't hurt anyone or done any real harm, it can be the greatest learning experience of all! Learning about ourselves is sometimes tough. Facing the music. Doing what is right VS what is easy and comfortable. Growing past your existing limits - be they beliefs, attitudes or aptitudes.

I had a conversation today which did a number of things to and for me. There's the obvious "oh crap, I did it again... extract foot..." but what might not be so obvious is that I did some growing today. What does this have to do with the title "Friendship"? Over and above my little bit of growing, I also reflected on what causes growth. One factor is discomfort. When we're not comfortable with the way things are, we're more likely to change than if things are "status quo". This led me to think of the times in my life where I've done considerable growing - emotionally, mentally, psychologically. They were the times when I might have rubbed my friends the wrong way and they were friends enough to say "Hey, heads up..." (although some of my friends would choose more colourful language). Have you ever done or said something that DID rub your friend the wrong way, and you no longer had a friend? Thankfully this hasn't happened to me since grade school, but it makes me truly appreciate the friends I have right now. I can - time and time again - say the wrong thing, do something stupid or expose a bit of myself that demonstrates that I DO have some learning and growing to do. What do they do? Some will point it out quietly. Others will make sure I'm embarrassed about it so it drives home the need to change. Still others will take the time to say "have you considered this approach?" - offering not only the "heads up" but a possible alternate way of conducting myself in or approaching that situation.

Friends will help you grow and support you in your darkest hour. They will also allow you the courtesy of returning the compliment. Be good to your friends. Remember them.