Realizing what's important in life

I think it's been almost precisely two years since my first blog post here, minus a week or two, maybe.

Not like I actually write regularly, not at all; in fact, I think I've only ever written about somewhat important events, making small remarks about less important events of my life, such as people dying left and right, a part of my skin being surgically removed, that kind of event - we've all been there.

Nonetheless, before I divulge into an endless rant about how much I hate certain parts of my life (or people, rather), I feel I should just keep this concise and to the point.

I think anyone who's managed to take note of my work who does not hate my guts for getting into arguments with them knows that I spent most of the past two years adding my collection to this database. Doujinshi, a largely unclaimed frontier, an adventure - most of the free time I had went towards this, evenings, holidays, weekends spent on nothing but this noble effort. And about three months ago, I finished it, accomplished what seemed like a distant dream - I was done.

However, as with many dreams, you only see the reality of them once you've actually accomplished them. The truth is, after realizing just how much money went into my collection, I'm only just beginning to grasp what else I could have accomplished with that money, what else it could have gone towards to.

Pondering this issue, I realized the fleetingness of it all - purchasing something I felt I needed, only for it to go into the shelf, reduced to nothing but the spine of a book, just one among its thousands of brethren, insignificant like one of the guys who are credited as "Soldier 54" once the credits roll, the ones who are shot in the head or dismembered to make the audience realize that the hero might be in a pinch once it's his turn to face that particular warrior on the opposing side.

No one in the audience ever realizes that those guys, too, have their dreams - their families waiting at home, the love of their life who then seeks solace from their sudden demise by allowing our dead non-protagonist's best friend to comfort them from within the warmth of her bedsheets.

I honestly don't like that, and right now it feels like I've got a hell of a lot Soldier 54's here. I've hardly even read anything I've bought within the past few years, I'm no better than the audience that feels Soldier 54's role is only to make a ridiculously pretty-faced protagonist look even better, and that is something I cannot accept.

In short, I think I cannot give my books the attention they deserve and they cannot give me what I actually wish for. It is a tough realization, but now I feel like I've actually managed to understand what is important in my life. All my efforts, all my money could have gone towards something else, and I finally know what it should have been, what it can still be.

Two years ago, I said I had finally begun expanding a collection that was primarily focused on Touhou Project, since then, my purchases have somewhat exploded, I suppose. It took me two years, a lot of effort and even more money to realize this, but what is actually important to me in my life, what I feel I should be directing my attention towards, is not building the world's largest collection of Doujinshi, there is a dream greater than that, or many dreams, probably.

I no longer want to amass books I cannot appreciate past their artistic value and the entertainment they provide.

It is for that reason that I finally realized that I don't want to build the world's largest collection of Doujinshi - I want to build the world's largest collection of Touhou Project related Doujinshi and other merchandise.

It is the only series, the only part of my life I actually care enough about to warrant such an effort. I love my collection, but I love this one series more than anything else, it's the only one I consider worth it, the only whose books I read with an actual interest.

I've already removed everything else (minus FFXI, god, I love that game) from my collection, sales have already begun. There is no going back - I'm going for the top, determined to get there with things I truly care about.

By the way, I really hope no one thought I actually was going to get rid of my entire collection for something else - that would be just silly, wouldn't it?

Anyway, that settles this matter. To conclude this, I've taken the liberty of taking a group shot of my Soldier 54's. Once that shelf is empty, my mission is accomplished and all those books will be with people who can appreciate them more than I can, so feel free to check my lists for sales of Doujinshi and figures.

I salute you - farewell, friends, you were great, but from here on out, it's Touhou Project only!

Edit on 2018/02/09: Okay, nevermind, I cannot do this. A simple pruning would have been the more prudent option, I'm too greedy for the rest and anything but that just limits me too much. Lesson learned, indeed.

darkfader (4 måneder siden) #27419320I was thinking that there are probably a lot of doujinshi I still like to have that are in your collection; so I laughed a bit on that silly-thinking bit.
Of course you can't just get rid of a fine collection just like that.
I have touhou as one of the notifications and keep seeing new entries added dayly >_< so I really think limiting to just touhou is enough already.
My latest doujinshi loot should arrive next week (after clearing customs) xD And there's more to come still. There will be one more room available hopefully soon for me to place some bookshelves, figure shelves, hang up all those wallscrolls xD

Oh, a new room, very nice! Setting up new rooms is always fun, so best of luck with that. If there's anything you want to buy, feel free to ask, though; I'm selling pretty much everything that is not Touhou.

Lepetit89 (4 måneder siden) #27309786Completely dropping some things is definitely difficult; for me, it's difficult enough to get rid of things in general, but when they're from a series I actually liked? Yep, I get why you're hesitating.
For me, it's mostly a matter of weighing whether I like that one series so much more than all other series combined - and that's the case. If it's not for you, then I think you shouldn't push yourself, unless, of course, you feel pressured to stay up-to-date with all series, causing financial issues; then you definitely need to prioritize. Best of luck finding the right answer for yourself!

Thank you for the encouragement! :)

To make it harder for me, my #1 franchise has very little merchandise. So if I would limit myself to my #1, I would be 'done' with collecting very quick. Same for my #2. My #3 franchise has tons and piles of merch, and because I am still a collector at heart that likes to hunt things, I think the 'smallest' I can ever go is my main 3. :)

I was thinking that there are probably a lot of doujinshi I still like to have that are in your collection; so I laughed a bit on that silly-thinking bit.
Of course you can't just get rid of a fine collection just like that.
I have touhou as one of the notifications and keep seeing new entries added dayly >_< so I really think limiting to just touhou is enough already.
My latest doujinshi loot should arrive next week (after clearing customs) xD And there's more to come still. There will be one more room available hopefully soon for me to place some bookshelves, figure shelves, hang up all those wallscrolls xD

Lepetit89 (4 måneder siden) #27310065It definitely does apply to a lot collections, but if you have that much sitting around, you can definitely try selling them - you'd be surprised how easy it can be to sell a few books, which also has the positive side effect of freeing up room while filling your pockets. Either way, best of luck, whatever you decide on, and thank you!

Thanks! And I do have an on-going sale hosted on my LJ actually but since the website is dying it's pretty slow going. The awful thing about selling doujins is shipping scares a lot of people off (I'm from Ausland) so even if they're interested in picking up 1-2 books, shipping usually cost more than the total :(

yaiba (4 måneder siden) #27107717Finding a niche to specialize in is one evolution of collecting. I personally collect petit-style figures.
If you want to give more meaning to your books, you could try writing reviews about specific titles, mangaka, or circles. I've found that summarizing what I like (or dislike) about something helps to refine what I want to collect as well. It also allows the book to become more than just something lined up on your shelf.
P.S.
That's a lot of doujin. For my part, I've just completed collecting a set of "Black Albums" by ideolo.

That's definitely an interesting idea, though I'd probably have too much trouble to decide on what to write about it. Still, it's not a bad idea to find a purpose for them beyond reading or lining them up in the shelf.

rubyserpent_720 (4 måneder siden) #27119267I sort of understand how you feel and salute your dedication for adding all the database entries. I have around 500 doujins sitting around and most are from fandoms I bought at the height of their popularity and since then I have lost interest in their contents. I feel bad about the amount of money that went into the books that could've been put into better use (eg figures) but at the end of the day that applies to all collections.
Wishing you best of luck in your sales and your new goal :)

It definitely does apply to a lot collections, but if you have that much sitting around, you can definitely try selling them - you'd be surprised how easy it can be to sell a few books, which also has the positive side effect of freeing up room while filling your pockets. Either way, best of luck, whatever you decide on, and thank you!

The-Hurricane (4 måneder siden) #27185680View spoilerHide spoilerLol, at least I'm not alone in having a collection that is overwhelmingly porn.
I firmly believe that's what doujinshi is primarily bought for anyway.
As an interesting side note though (perhaps more of a ramble, sorry!), I find it kind of funny how involved and interesting some of the so called "plotless smut" doujinshi can be.
One of my absolute favourite doujins involves a sort of "continuation" of a plot line from the series it's from. No mistake, there's (decently) graphic sex in there, but I swear the story feels like it was ripped right from "behind the scenes" if you will. Even the sex is woven into the story line, the characters and their motivations and just how screwed up, loving and co-dependent this particular pairing is (they're one of the only pairings my massive angst-aversion seems to have mysteriously skipped over).
I'd say 98% of the smut collection is just that, smut, with paper thin plot lines ("oh look, I found an aphrodisiac and I drank it, what ever could go wrong?", "let's watch a movie together ~alone~, I wonder what will happen?", so on and so forth), but I'm always pleasantly surprised to find a doujin that crafts an actual, thoughtful story in addition to the pornographic payoff we're all looking for.

It definitely is the first thing people think about when they hear "Doujinshi", so it's not all that surprising. I agree on some plots being interesting, though; there are even books where I'm not sure if the pornography was even supposed to be the focus since the story was so good, though the pornographic content takes second place as far as the page are concerned for those ones.

Maakie (4 måneder siden) #27228571I can relate to this a lot, as someone that has spend the last almost 1,5 years digging through a huge collection, wanting to have something more specific. I have limited myself to 3 main franchises and 5 side-franchises, but I still find it very hard to get rid of certain items not fitting this criteria, so I salute you for that! Maybe one day my collection will also be limited to only 1 franchise. Or maybe I can get myself to drop the side-franchises...

Completely dropping some things is definitely difficult; for me, it's difficult enough to get rid of things in general, but when they're from a series I actually liked? Yep, I get why you're hesitating.

For me, it's mostly a matter of weighing whether I like that one series so much more than all other series combined - and that's the case. If it's not for you, then I think you shouldn't push yourself, unless, of course, you feel pressured to stay up-to-date with all series, causing financial issues; then you definitely need to prioritize. Best of luck finding the right answer for yourself!