I thought I’ve always taken the road less travelled. I guess I did make myself believe that for quite some time. Now I have no qualms admitting to myselfthat I only thought I did.

From the start of the journey,I had one foot out the door I guess. I was taking one step forward, and two steps back each time. 2

Just like that saying goes,I built a wall around meto see if anyone cared enoughto try and break it down.But I’d only been playing a game;because I told myself I didn’t really want anyone to care,so I threatened to lay an assault charge.A game: stupid and mean – with two people hurt.Someone cared enough to risk getting hurt,Yet I, like it is also said,I pushed away the thing I want the mostAnd deep down I didn’t want that game;I wanted someone to care.For a moment my heart did grow wings- I saw hope – and then the fear struckand in panic I lashed out.Yet, I want to change.Will anyone believe me now?Will someone reach outand risk again? 3

The universe is just conspiring to show me what a fool I’ve made of myself. Lately, so many circumstances have pointed out the fact that having the guts to do things is not really enough.

What I need is to have the gutsto do things that matter the most to me.

It’s not enough to fight for something -that you don’t know the reason why you are fightingfor it in the first place. Same as going after something/someone without a thought as to why you’re going through all the trouble for it in the first place.

Sometimes, going after someone/something without knowing why you should is so pointless. It’s just wasting time, a luxury that you don’t have.

What if you’re going after something so hard for and then one day you just realize after getting it that it’s not what you wanted all along.You don’t even know what the fuss was all about in the first place.

And you’ve known deep downwhat you wanted since the very beginningbut you were too scaredto go after it so you went after something elseto play it safe because if and when you failed, it wouldn’t sting half as much.

So all along you kidded yourself into thinking you were taking the road less travelled, taking big risks, diving headfirst, free-falling into the unknown.

But all along, you played it safe.You took the wrong risksand felt giddy with the fake highs.And how dumb was that?

I want no more of that.This time around I’m going out bare-naked.Stop wasting away by chasing after the wind.

I’m now going for the gold.I won’t pretend I’m not scared out of my wits.

Eyes are going to roll,tongues are going to wag.

On top of thatI’d finally be giving myself a second chanceat something I shied away from years agobecause I didn’t want to failat the one thing I knew I was born to do.

No pressure, right? Ha!

So there.I’ve just recently taken one baby step towards that.

I just hope and pray I won’t take two giant steps backward.I’m going after that dream andfinally taking the road less travelled. 2

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —I took the one less traveled by,And that has made all the difference. 1

Baggage: everyone’s got some– that’s not the problem:it’s whether you control and heal it,or it whether it controlsand destroys you.

You can at any time reinvent yourselfYou can learn new things at any time in your life,For you can undo core irrational beliefs. . .and drop the 'stinkin’ thinkin’(change your head – change your life),and . . . a whole new world opens up to you.And be free. 4