While I Fall

While I sit here, distraught and destroyed,
while I thrash about, weeping for all that we were,
while memories make my eyes overflow with unending tears,
do you even bat an eyelash at the past?
While I walk alone, on this lonely, clouded path,
while I rail against this fate, forever missing you,
while here I remain, mired in misery and woe,
do you ever regret even one thing?
While I've spent just over six months drifting,
while I've spent them confused and weary,
while they've ripped me open, torn me down,
have you even once missed what we had?
While I've been wishing, pleading to forget,
while I've been wanting nothing but to be gone from this,
while I've been defying myself by yet loving you,
have you even once had a feeling for me?
Once, our lives were so linked,
and I never would have had to ask this;
I knew what was going on in your life,
what made you smile, what made you cry.
But now, all that's seemingly forever changed –
apart we live, and apart we stay;
I miss you, in every possible way,
and I just have to know.
What has been happening, inside your head
and inside your heart, while we've been apart?
What has the universe done to you or for you,
while it's been eating me alive?
I may never know, the answers to my questions,
I may never again touch the magic that you are;
I will never again be the man that I once was,
but I pray I won't stay this mess that I have been.