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Brief 1 Submission

I have used a symbolic style for the composition of my article rather than a realistic composition as it allows for me to better represent the key themes and messages of my chosen article. Firstly, I have used the background of my piece in an effort to convey the setting, tone and ideas within the article. The crumbling brick wall is used to show that the article takes place in a ruined and crumbling area to represent the war and the poverty apparent within the article. I have also created a desert plain that stretches off into the horizon to convey the middle-eastern setting to the viewer. It is also used to convey the isolation that is caused with the young girls marrying as it is a contrast to the cluttered and rubble filled left side of the screen. The man’s eyes have been purposely cropped out of the image to help portray the idea that the girls often do not know who their husbands will be until their wedding day. I also made the man a lot taller than the girl to not only show the age differences that are presented in the article but to also show his superiority in the relationship as he looks down upon his small and fragile bride. The rusty fences in the background reference the security fences that are used to contain refugee camps. it also acts as a symbol to show how the young girls that are trapped in their situations because of poverty. The outfit of the girl references what my research found a bride in the situation of refugee poverty wears immediately after her ceremony. The white hijab is used not only to convey that she is a bride but it also shows her purity and innocence. The fact that her face is the only one completely shown represents that the articles focus is about the stories and viewpoints of girls in her position. It also allows the viewer to better sympathize with her because of her scared expression and her central position with the composition. The aggressive arms appear to be reaching out to attack and hurt her and this is used to represent the part of the article that states that parent’s will often find husbands for their young daughters to protect them from being raped or assaulted. The arms as seen to be kept just out of reach by the girls tethering to the husband. From my research, I discovered that two interlocked rings in the symbol for marriage so this was used to more clearly convey the marriage aspect of the text. The girl is shown to be confined within the wedding ring and therefore within the role as wife and only wife as the article communicates. This helps to convey what the article states that the girls lives become once they are married. It shows that she is very restricted, isolated and unable to move freely. Comparatively, the man’s ring is only on his finger and this presents the idea of the text that he is much more free than the bride is in these marriages. This idea is reinforced by the linked rings that show her tethered to her husband. As the chain goes further towards the man they become darker and more gray to represent the idea in the article that girls are entrapped and imprisoned through their marriages. In order to not make the husband appear as her ‘protector’ but rather as her ‘captor’ as the article suggests I gave his face a red hue to create a visual parallel between him and a conventional devil. I have made it so that it appears that the bride is focusing on the arms trying to attack her rather than focusing on her husband to convey the idea that it is out of fear of attacks that force young girls into the situation of child marriages. Through the use of both sides of the image using arms pointing towards the main subject the viewers attention is more directly grasped.

In no particular order, I present you with the finest of Rupert’s comments.

#1 Hey Joe I really like you’re 1st and 5th idea and I think they have a lot of potential for representing your article really well. An idea I had for your first idea is that you could possibly replace the scales with the man himself and put each of the food groups in each of his hands. To help with representing the paleo and modern sides of this image you could also compose the man with one side of his body being dressed in traditional caveman attire and the other side in a nice business suit. Then you could better show the confusion on the man’s face about which option is the best which is what i feel is a major theme in the article. It would also be more technical with have to blend the cave man clothing with the suit and making the head fit both bodies. From what I hear from my tutor, the markers like to see technical skill in your image rather than that plebeian copy and paste malarkey. For your concept i really liked the fact that it would look like a cave painting. i feel like this would be very visually striking and would help to communicate the message of the article. Perhaps you could play around with the representations of the caveman and modern day man with contrasts of their diets and how they obtain their food. I feel like this idea could be comical to look and therefore would intrigue people into wanting to read the article. like perhaps you could make it look like a normal cave painting depicting the hunter gatherer life style but put all of the people in very proper suits (I dont know why im so fixated on the suit idea) or perhaps just modern clothes. Regardless, I definitely think you should develop this idea further. Hope this helps fella 🙂 fight the good fight. Win the good war. Namaste.

#2 Hahah I love the idea that lucid dream bank heists lead to full blown schizophrenia. I’ll make sure I steer clear of them next time im trotting around in Dream Land. On a slightly more serious note, I think you should incorporate certain aspects of shared dream experiences into your image. Such as arms being ‘zig zaggy’ or other bodily disfigurements, clocks and watches with no hands, text and written language being blurry or completely jumbled, having no reflection or looking like someone else in your reflection, gravity working in strange ways and being able to move objects without physically touching them. Although that may sound like a bunch of guff, they are all associated with helping people realize they are dreaming and therefore be able to lucid dream. I think this would help to address your target audience as well because the type of people likely to read an article about lucid dreaming are probably quite interested in dreams and may be able to instantly connect with the visuals of your image. Also when trying to conceptualize a dreamscape, pretty much just blur random things and add light sources coming from random directions. If you want to see a great example of someone managing to visually replicate scenes of a dream world i recommend Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind. It’s a really good film.

Also, fun side note, some people only dream in sepia tones and black and white. The human brain is weird and dumb.

#3 Although I really like the idea of the puppet master angle I feel as though this image needs more manipulation of its environment to clearly portray lucid dreaming. i feel like having the puppet flying is a very good start but I think you need to show either the puppet or the puppet master directly interacting with things in the immediate dream environment in ways that we cannot usually. Like perhaps the puppeteer could be reaching a hand into the dream world and lifting up a car or something along those lines. you could make this visually interesting by fading her other hand as it reaches down into the dream world so that perhaps just the outline of the hand could be seen lifting the object. Or possibly the hand could go completely invisible or could become distorted as it enters the dream. I think manipulating your image like this would help you to get some top notch marks as my tutor keeps harking on about how it’s important that your image is not just a simple cut and paste job. Your idea already seems outside of being that anyway so i think you will be sweet regardless.

#4 I think you’ve chosen a really awesome article and have some really interesting concept ideas. In particular I like concept 4 the most. Because I think it conveys the article almost entirely by both showing where the rubbish comes from and where it ends up in a visually efficient way. I think that you could improve the idea through the use of many small details such as making the water a murky brown, making the sky smoggy and blurring the distant garbage buildings in the background. I think this may be a bit cheesy but it is an idea none the less, you could make the smoke from the city or the reflection on the water into a skull or something along those lines to reinforce the toxicity and danger of both living the way that we are and disposing of waste the way we do. But yeah tremendous concepts nonetheless. Good job kiddo.

#5 Hey man I just read your article and it seemed to me that the body of the article was about not only cultures encroaching on what was previously stark kiwi culture, but also that kiwis are becoming more accepting of other cultures and are more open to being part of them. It’s that kind of melting pot idea that we hear getting tossed around all the time. i think what could be a really good visual element to incorporate into your image would be to show this ‘melting pot’ adding to the cultural confusion. perhaps it could be a background or foreground image were the black and white silver fern flag is getting blurred and mixed with the flags of different cultures into a big ‘mess’ where you can only just distinguish one flag or culture from the other. You could maybe also have a pair of hands like in concept 3 trying to cup the NZ flag from the melting pot to try and protect it or keep it separate. You could also convey the idea in the article that maybe it is too late to keep NZ culture separate from others by showing that even though it is cupped in the hands, it has already ‘curdled’ with other cultures too much and is running out of the hands and back into the pot. I know this isn’t exactly the most artsy fartsy use of symbolism but im sure you could build on that idea pretty well. I feel like it would show both sides of the article as some of the viewers may see this as a really good thing while other, more traditional kiwis may see this as muddled confusion and a loss of the NZ culture that they hold dear so very dear to their hearts. All the best homie! Namaste.