If not, read “Love and Other Behemoths” and then you’ll be caught up on the situation.

The reason I bring it up is because a few weeks ago I got it into my head that it would be a good idea to make him a mix cd. As you all know, making someone a mix cd is a good way to prove that you’re confident, independent, and completely indifferent to them. If you want to show someone just how much you don’t like them, make them a mix cd. In fact, make them the mix that I made Ezra. Here’s the track list:

1 ) My Drive Thru- Santogold, Casablancas, & Pharrell

2 ) Just the Way You Are- Bruno Mars

3 ) Forget You- Glee

4 ) Over My Head- A Day to Remember

5 ) Don’t Wake Me Up- The Hush Sound

6 ) Industry- Jon McLaughlin

7 ) 1234- Feist

8 ) Misery- Maroon 5

9 ) Super Duper Love- Joss Stone

10 ) Don’t Stay- Laura Izibor

11 ) All In- Lifehouse

12 ) You and I- Ingrid Michaelson

13 ) Us- Regina Spektor

14 ) The Cave- Mumford & Sons

15 ) Come Home- OneRepublic and Sara Bareilles

16 ) I Will Follow You Into the Dark- Death Cab for Cutie

17 ) Helena- Nickel Creek

Do you see where I took the sharp turn into Emoville and then made a left at Delusion Junction? (Delusion Junction, what’s your function? Analyzing words and non-existent glances) It was right around the Laura Izibor song. Thank goodness my friend, Tesia, ran interference and took this cd before I could give it to him.

A word of advice to those of you suffering from an inconvenient infatuation*: discuss everything with your friends. If I had followed that bit of advice before I made the cd, I wouldn’t feel like a pathetic fool now. As it is, when I told Hannah about the cd she said, “Why would you do that? Are you thirteen? Here’s what’s going to happen: you’ll hand him the cd, he’ll take it, give you an awkward thanks and then go on his merry way.”

Joanna said, “Oh no no no. Bad idea.”

Ariel said, “You idiot. Why would you do that?”

Rachel said, “What are you? Nick from Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist? Gyasi, you saw how sad he was in that movie.”

Tesia said, “Gyasi! Did you listen to this cd before you burned it? Or are you really this foolish?”

Yeah, praise Jesus for friends.

* I’ve decided to call the strange conglomeration of emotions that I feel towards Ezra an “inconvenient infatuation.” My reasons for this are twofold: 1) I don’t like the fact that I’m feeling anything towards him and 2) once he leaves the state I’ll be back to my normal self. Hence, it’s an inconvenient infatuation.