Eleven months of sex with her and still no cunnilingus? How long should I wait for her to come around? Is it okay to abandon your partner because she won’t eat your pussy? Am I a fucked up human being for judging her inability (or her unwillingness) to suck on my moist flower of love? Okay, so maybe “moist flower” is a bad metaphor, but what the fellatio!?

What is a dyke to do with these “so-called straight women” who think nothing of swallowing a cupful of gizm from the dripping meat-stick of a cheating boyfriend, but cannot bear the thought of lightly licking a part of me which, routinely, I suck and kiss and nuzzle all night on her selfish body?

I had been chasing her for years. She said she was straight but I didn’t believe her and I knew I could be very convincing. I knew in time she would fall for my charms or my tenacity or her own curiosity. Then one night her boyfriend did something stupid enough for her to want to get back at him. She came over to my apartment furious and hurting. I made tea. I ran a bath. I was on my A-game of lesbian-chasing-straight that night. It was magical. And she needed someone. She didn’t want sex, but she wanted to be close. I held her and read her passages from Toni Morrison’s Sula in bed.

We fooled around for three months before she finally let me “do it” to her. There were soft kisses and heavy breaths; whispered nicknames and wordless grunts. Screams. Nails. Teeth. Orgasms. When she came, it was in waves and waves and waves. She sobbed and told me she was in love with me. We cried and we cuddled. All night I waited for her to pull me toward her and tug at the waist of my steamy wet panties. Close to dawn, I wiggled out of them and offered myself to her. I saw the look of horror and told her not to worry about this being her first time. I knew she would be fine. I guided her hand to my clitoris. She rubbed it a little and stopped. I told her that it was easy. All she had to do was mimic the things I did to her and I would be happy with the result. She, of

OK, now first of all, I want to say this is from the point of view of a straight woman....

Now, how is it that this woman made it clear to you from DAY ONE that she was straight, and you persisted until she was in a moment of weakness and then seduced her,because you were convinced you could change her mind, and the framework of the article is that SHE is selfish???

Did you ever think that maybe YOU took advantage of HER emotional vulnerability? That she could LOVE you because you were there for her, WITHOUT having the desire to be sexually involved with you?? That, because you seemed to offer her what she wanted at the time emotionally, that she felt obliged to become involved sexually??

Now, if she had not made it clear from DAY ONE that she was straight, I could see her being called SELFISH. But, as far as I can see, she told you up front what she was about, you decided to pursue anyway, she DID "fall in love" with you AS A PERSON, but not necessarily sexually, and she TRIED to be who you wanted her to be, but was unable to.

And by the way, not every straight woman goes down on a man. Not every straight woman who goes down on a man swallows. And if a man was writing an article about how upset he was that his wife would not go down on him, he would be excoriated and called a mysogynist.

There's something self destructive in a gay woman allowing a straight woman into her bed and into her life on an intimate basis. Pure masochism. Unless you're into masochism, and are aware when you are being masochistic, great. But you ultimately came to a wise conclusion, why in the world bother with a woman who doesn't love and WANT to love other women...

It's the flip side fantasy of a straight guy thinking he's going to turn a lesbian. It's just fucked up. Clearly, this woman was just a selfish pillow queen more than happy to use you, and you willingly let her.

seriously...if a straight women is in your bed and intimate with you, isn't that a sign she is wanting to be with a woman?

straight...bisexual...lesbian...labels don't apply when a woman is exploring feelings and 2 people are willing. Like mystic said...who is using who?

I feel for Staceyann - she reached - as did this other woman, and where they were meeting wasn't really on the same page or on the same plane. Love and relationships is about taking risks and trying to see if each other fits.

They fell hard for one another and it wasn't enough. expectations and fears ended up taking control.

I think Staceyann had touched a beauty that will forever be.

I just hope that if the song plays in her heart - even if it's for another straight women, she decides to dance anyway.

I dunno where you're getting a grand love affair out of all this. Granted, it's a one sided version of what was going on, and it does seem to be portrayed as incredibly one-sided. when the "love" or sex wasn't reciprocated, StacyAnn remembered her pride, picked it up off the floor, and left.

Wow, that's incredibly harsh. Who's really using who here, when the woman said she was straight from the start and wasn't the one laying the perfect trap when someone was vulnerable. As for the lack of reciprocity, she didn't exactly hold a gun to Stacyann's head and demand she go down on her.

I said it was masochism on the part of StacyAnn, so yeah, she was willingly being used, but still used. You're right, no one held a gun to anyone's head. Well, after 11 months of a one way...sexual encounter, I guess, because it doesn't seem like a relationship, I guess there are no victims.

You're right, personally, i don't flirt with straight woman because when a guy know that i'm a lesbian and try to flirt with me, i found it so disrespectful that i would never do that to someone else. (even if its not that easy)

This was a lot of fun to read. I actually really enjoyed it. You have a way with words. There's just one little thing that I have to get off of my chest.

I think its time to stop demonizing the straight girls. I mean she told you she wasn't into it; You chased her. She told you no; You chased her. She gave in and came like a shower because let's face it, once you let it happen being fucked is being fucked. That and you're probably pretty good at it.

Then you're all shocked and hurt that she didn't want to go down on you? You make her out to be this egotistical withholding bitch when she told you from the start she wasn't into it. And really, how do you know she was even into going down on guys? And swallowing? Why do so many lesbians assume that every woman who has ever been with a man loved to slurp up his come.

There are people in this world who will never lick anyone's genitals. There are also many, myself included, who really need to be into someone to want to taste heer. We all have our own wiring, and if you cared about this woman, rather than objectifying her straightness, you would not push her to short circuit hers.

I don’t want my pussy to have to participate in another bad execution of Lesbian Sex 101

Not every lesbian comes out of the womb knowing how to fuck.You sound like you not only want to say the hell with all the straight women(and I do agree bad news,stay far AWAY),but it also sounds like you are saying the hell with all the lesbians who are trying to learn the ART of LOVE.

I'm saying that writers are clearly more risky to do than straight girls.

"When I told her, she begged me to reconsider. She sobbed. I held her for an hour. After which I kissed her forehead and told her no. She asked me why? Why? Why? I explained to her that an integral part of any relationship was an open and free two-way exchange of touch. What I wanted to say was that her vagina had become too fishy and that the texture of fucking her had become too hard for me. But I am a feminist, and it was not my intention to undo her with my leaving."

"What is a dyke to do with these “so-called straight women” who think nothing of swallowing a cupful of gizm from the dripping meat-stick of a cheating boyfriend, but cannot bear the thought of lightly licking a part of me which, routinely, I suck and kiss and nuzzle all night on her selfish body?"

"She held my sobbing frame for an hour, after which she kissed my forehead and said no, she couldn’t do it. It was too — fishy. The folds were too soft. The texture was just hard for her."

I fell in love with an out lesbian and just as I was coming out, she realized she was bisexual and started dating a man. They've been together over a year now and I still can't get over her. Can't tell you how much it hurts. She's one of my best friends...I don't know what to do.

Zoem,, the first woman we love is always the hardest to get over but you will. If you have to do like Camomile and stop seeing or talking to her for a while to give yourself a chance to move on, then do. There are lots more women out there and you'll find another.

I hope Lola isn't condemning all bisexuals with her statement but you should know that she clearly just didn't feel the same way about you and that that often happens. She could just as easily have fallen for another girl and left you hanging. No one knows why one person is or is not attracted to another. We often don't understand it ourselves but it's not a comment on your ability to love or be loved. Work through the pain and find someone new.

there isn't anything wrong in eating pussy....but lesbian sex is so much more. In fact oral sex is just ONE way....and to me I want to have fun sex...and sex that lasts hours and hours....

trust me...if she is eating for hours and hours....I'm gonna fall asleep. People try to recreate a moment of passion and get stuck in to the same sex positions...or think that this is the ONLY way. eating pussy is over rated.

I can squirm just as hard by the talented strong hands or the strap on...or everything combined.

I think what gets me is people think lesbians and say pussy eater...it's like that is the ONLY way we do and that that is all we want. AND it's a requirement in being a lesbian.

ONLY straight women don't like eating pussy...

Sorry...

I'd rather concentrate on doing hand jobs and straping it on so I can pay complete attention to her every move and feeeeel her to the brink...and look in her eyes and talk into her ear..filling not only her in the cup'a of my hands but stroking her mental organ to the brink. And to the brink and to the brink and to the brink.

it's kind of hard to do that when your up to your nose in punani juice. I mean don't get me wrong - it's alright...but I want that moment to be one of a kind...not (pardon the pun) a handbook of moves made exclusively by lesbians. Ya know?

besides...looking up at me with your mouth covered in my mound will have me in stitches and needing to start all over again.

circles...i love circles too ...but tongues aren't the only things that can move in circles. just saying...

[I wonder how many women have been ridiculed and dumped for not suckin’ dick.]
plenty
[In my view, the male was always the user and the woman was just a fuck property.]
i guess i got a different view then, some people are users the others etc regardless of there gender
[Then again, some women get off and like being seen as “the fuck property” because they themselves view the man in the same manner. Everyone gets what they want - which is great sex.]
again i would say my view is that that happens regardless of gender

[One has to ask Stacyann…Was this relationship just for sex OR (with respect to Staceyann) really a blocking point where you, Stacyann, no longer connected with this women?]
i think there is a 3th option ...
but i wont go in to that one
winks