Memorial Day weekend is upon us! Which means two things: Public swimming pools are opening throughout the four-seasons parts of our great nation; and, if you haven’t been invited to a Memorial Day cookout, it turns out no one likes you very much. Hey, join the club, pal. Long summer weekends are for cookouts. Maybe…

When I was an angular teen with visible ribs and freakish teen metabolism, and not a rotund middle-aged slob, my brother and I used to walk across the street from our high school to McDonald’s in the short interval between the end of the school day and the start of football practice. I’d get two Big Macs for two…

Here was a challenge: my wife had decided to host her staff of 14 in our home for some awful reason. Something to do with a training video and general good-vibe staff retreat benefits. They would need to eat food, of course, and herein lay the challenge: More than half of her staff members consider themselves vegans.…

People are meant to move. We’ve been doing it for tens of thousands of years. Chasing mammoths across the tundra, chasing shiny pebbles down frigid mountain streams, chasing native people out of their homelands. Somewhere in all that traveling we learned to grow plants in rows and gather cattle into groups and squint…

Movies are great. They make you laugh, make you cry, and make you feel every feeling in between. They can teach you about people you don’t know, people you do know, and even help you better understand yourself. They are created by some of the most brilliant artistic minds, and often star the most beautiful people, our…

When the fabric of my family is someday finally rent, and generations of heirs and descendants wage decades of bitter war upon one another, and oaths become ancient curses until the family tree is left utterly in ruin, the issue won’t be money, or land, or politics, or even whether it is called “tuna fish” or “tuna…

It is socially acceptable to dress like a slob now. The rise of athleisure—an incredible trend that has made it OK to wear yoga pants to the bar—has helped trend American fashion to the slouchy and the comfortable. Kanye West sells sweatshirts for hundreds of dollars. New York magazine says “Champion vies with Gucci…

It’s gonna be a bright 88 degrees fahrenheit in the nation’s capital next week. Whatever the hell the calendar says, summertime is upon us. There is no force in all the universe that can take it back, now that it has been freely given. No backsies on this one, nature.

Once upon a time, inspired by the good works of Kinja Deals, I bought something called a Lumo Lift. It’s a wearable tech. As far as I know, FitBit is both a unique wearable tech and also a genericized trademark for this sort of thing (fit bit). As far as I’m concerned, when I am wearing the Lumo Lift, I am wearing a…

Deadspin is home to the popular “Deadcast” podcast that is beloved by thousands of fans. But right now, it’s time for a new episode of “Food on Franklin,” another, more unofficial podcast, that’s also been known to be good.

Happiness, who knows. Joy, jeez, that’s a whole frickin’ thing. I will never have even the faintest idea about deep personal fulfillment. But you can make the minute-by-minute drudgery of life a little better. You can hang a bird feeder near a window, and fill it with birdseed, and have some pretty birds to look at.