RWN’s Favorite Ann Coulter Quotes

As Ann Coulter’s book “Slander” has rocketed up the charts she’s become the new darling of the right. The fact that she’s drop dead gorgeous, is seemingly on TV every night, and absolutely drives liberals up a wall doesn’t hurt either. Here are some of RWN’s favorite Coulter quotes…

Big Government / Democrats

Democrats are channeling their frustration with America’s imminent military victory in Afghanistan into hysterical opposition to reasonable national security measures at home. (Incidentally, this ought to prove once and for all what a bunch of paper tigers the Russians are. What were they doing over there for 10 years? It hasn’t taken us 10 weeks.) — Ann Coulter

Fortunately, Congress has no role in prosecuting this war either abroad or domestically. They are relieved of duty, free to “get back to normal,” as the president has recommended ‘ which in their case means enacting massive spending bills to fund comically useless government programs. That should make them happy. — Ann Coulter

When we were at peace, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now there’s a war, so Democrats want to raise taxes. When there was a surplus, Democrats wanted to raise taxes. Now that there is a mild recession, Democrats want to raise taxes. There is perennially some sector of the economy Teddy Kennedy is longing to socialize and this, too, will require raising taxes. — Ann Coulter

Taxes are like abortion, and not just because both are grotesque procedures supported by Democrats. You’re for them or against them. Taxes go up or down; government raises taxes or lowers them. But Democrats will not let the words “abortion” or “tax hikes” pass their lips. Which one was an “investment in our future” and which one is a “choice”? Was that killing babies or taking our money? — Ann Coulter

Hearing politicians tell us “we” can’t “afford” a tax cut is like listening to a glutton tell you he can’t “afford” a diet. In no other context do people talk about “paying for” money they don’t have. I can’t pay for your refusal to give me money because I need a yacht. — Ann Coulter

Ed “The Truth Is Illegal” Markey responded to Teamster support for ANWR by dismissively sniffing, it was only “one issue.” Luckily, the Democrats have all those other issues dear to the heart of the average blue-collar worker: abortion on demand, gay marriage and taxpayer-funded crucifixes submerged in urine. — Ann Coulter

Homeland Security

It may be annoying, but the rash of hijackings by Connecticut WASP girls surely explains the time-consuming — but still somehow completely useless — examination of my personal effects. We all have to make sacrifices for airline safety. — Ann Coulter

To be sure, there is a risk that mass deportations might upset the delicate diplomatic maneuvering designed to bring the largest possible number of unsavory regimes into our “international coalition.” On the other hand, some countries in the “international coalition” might be forced to conclude that the Great Satan is smarter than they thought. This part of the plan ought to appeal to their primitive sense of honor and boundaries. — Ann Coulter

Liberals

This is the way addled liberals really think. Even as they champion sucking the brains out of little babies, they think of themselves as indelibly compassionate because they favor an overweening, behemoth federal government. — Ann Coulter

Lawyer Alan Dershowitz is promoting the adoption of a national ID card. Liberals are stalwart defenders of civil liberties — provided we’re only talking about criminals. — Ann Coulter

We’ve finally given liberals a war against fundamentalism, and they don’t want to fight it. They would, except it would put them on the same side as the United States. — Ann Coulter

Liberals compare Jerry Falwell to the Taliban, but then are furious with George Bush for not being Jesus Christ. Evidently, what a president is supposed to do when the girls are scared is develop complete omniscience and omnipotence. Thus, the media repeatedly expound upon the proposition that what Bush should have done in response to the anthrax mailings is: Instantly produce the culprits and put an end to this madness! — Ann Coulter

Liberal soccer moms are precisely as likely to receive anthrax in the mail as to develop a capacity for linear thinking. — Ann Coulter

Usually the nonsense liberals spout is kind of cute, but in wartime their instinctive idiocy is life-threatening. — Ann Coulter

Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism, but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their country and hate the enemy. — Ann Coulter

We need to execute people like John Walker in order to physically intimidate liberals, by making them realize that they can be killed too. Otherwise they will turn out to be outright traitors. — Ann Coulter

The only rich people deserving of malice are rich liberals who express bemusement at the non-rich’s desire for a tax cut — Ann Coulter

The infernal flag-waving after 9/11 nearly drove liberals out of their gourds. For the left, ‘flag-waving’ is an epithet. — Ann Coulter

Misc.

If we’re so cruel to minorities, why do they keep coming here? Why aren’t they sneaking across the Mexican border to make their way to the Taliban? — Ann Coulter

In the corporeal world, international law is whatever the United States and Great Britain say it is. — Ann Coulter

The Great Satan is wearying of this reverse hegemony, in which little pipsqueak nations try to impose their pipsqueak values on us. Aren’t we the ones who should be arrogantly oppressing countries that unaccountably do not have the death penalty? — Ann Coulter

Before the New York Times starts running “Portraits in Grief” of former Enron employees, it’s worth remembering that even after the collapse, Enron stock is still worth more than the entire Social Security “trust fund.” — Ann Coulter

The only beef Enron employees have with top management is that management did not inform employees of the collapse in time to allow them to get in on the swindle. If Enron executives had shouted, “Head for the hills!” the employees might have had time to sucker other Americans into buying wildly over-inflated Enron stock. Just because your boss is a criminal doesn’t make you a hero. — Ann Coulter

Have we been cryptic? Right-wingers said Clinton was a lying, unscrupulous traveling salesman. It turned out he was a lying, unscrupulous traveling salesman. Now liberals scratch their heads demanding to know: So what was it about him you didn’t like? — Ann Coulter

I have to say I’m all for public flogging. One type of criminal that a public humiliation might work particularly well with are the juvenile delinquents, a lot of whom consider it a badge of honor to be sent to juvenile detention. And it might not be such a cool thing in the ‘hood to be flogged publicly — Ann Coulter

The swing voters—I like to refer to them as the idiot voters because they don’t have set philosophical principles. You’re either a liberal or you’re a conservative if you have an IQ above a toaster — Ann Coulter

The (New York) Times editorial page is like a Ouija board that has only three answers, no matter what the question. The answers are: higher taxes, more restrictions on political speech and stricter gun control — Ann Coulter

The War

I don’t know. Have liberals seen our guys? Engaging in mind-boggling acts of heroism makes our brave servicemen happy. Camel-riding nomads may excel at the sucker punch, but wait until they see Western Civilization’s response. As pilot “Elvis” said on MSNBC the other night, “We’ll do the job.” So I wouldn’t worry too much about the redoubtable Taliban forces. We’re sending in men, not Washington Post columnists. — Ann Coulter

Not exactly smashing stereotypes of liberals as mincing pantywaists, the left’s entire contribution to the war effort thus far has been to whine. — Ann Coulter

The Afghan “negotiation phase” immediately precedes the traditional Afghan “surrender phase.” This entails the following: The defeated party surrenders and then comes out shooting. This is repeated several times. Finally, the vanquished party runs out of ammunition and is forced to surrender ‘ but seriously this time ‘ at which point the victors kill the foreigners and hug their fellow Afghans like long-lost brothers. — Ann Coulter