Weird Pittsburgh: Dynamite, cat traps, jagoffs at the carwash and your constitutional right to call your favorite public official an asshole

A judge has upheld Pennsylvanians’ constitutional right to cuss out their elected officials at public meetings. Johanna Boratko, a mother of two middle-schoolers, brought her concerns about bullying to a March meeting of the board of the Greater Johnstown School District. When a board member tried to cut off her comments and demanded she be “dismissed,” Boratko, 41, declared, “I’ll dismiss myself because yinz are a bunch of fucking assholes.” She then stormed out of the room. Boratko was charged with and convicted of disorderly conduct. She appealed, with help from the American Civil Liberties Union. The newscast of WJAC reports that Cambria County Court Senior Judge F. Joseph Leahey overturned her conviction. The judge cited the legal definition of “disorderly conduct” and stated that it could not be proven that Boratko intentionally caused “inconvenience, annoyance or alarm” to any of the fucking assholes on the school board. Leahey also said the f-word is not “obscene” under current statutes unless it is used in a sexual context. (He did not rule on whether or not it is obscene to still say “yinz.”)

Joseph Bauer lost his manager position at the Pennsylvania Department of Transportation for “blatantly violating the sexual-harassment policy he was supposed to be enforcing,” according to PennLive.com. Bauer, a one-time roadway-programs coordinator in Harrisburg, allegedly targeted a clerk. When she wore hoop earrings, he “place[d] his finger through the opening” and said, “I am touching your hole,” according to an internal investigation. He also reportedly offered to unhook her bra during CPR training and asked her how much she would charge for sex with him and with an animal. After an investigation, PennDOT offered to transfer Bauer to a non-managerial position. He refused, leading to his termination. He has since taken the matter to court twice, first to receive unemployment benefits (which he was denied), and then to get his job back. In the second case, Bauer “admitted to his behavior” in paperwork “but argued that it was appropriate and explainable,” reports PennLive.com. Judge Rochelle Friedman didn’t wait to hear the explanation before dismissing Bauer’s case.

A McKeesport police officer was fired after less than one week on the job due to a Snapchat post using a racial slur. A one-time friend shared an image that former officer Melissa Adamson created, combining a selfie of herself in uniform and the caption, “I’m the law today nigga.” Adamson, who is white, apparently took the photo when she worked for the Pitcairn Police Department, and it resurfaced after McKeesport hired her. She was apologetic to WTAE, explaining, “I’m not a racist. That’s not how I want to portray myself.”

Police say that Jeffrey Earl Davis was bicycling through New Castle, “high on pills” with, for some reason, a small stick of dynamite in his backpack. This, predictably, did not end well. Davis, 25, allegedly thought it would be “funny” to light the explosive and toss it onto the hood of a parked car. Police told the New Castle News that he stood and watched the blast, which caused $2,300 worth of damage; he pedaled away only when police arrived and was later identified.

You know that post-break-up meeting with your ex to trade hairbrushes, T-shirts, books and other stuff left at the other’s place that forces you to make sad, awkward small talk? Shane Thomas Horton, of McKean County, apparently wasn’t gonna have that. Instead, Horton, 27, allegedly broke the lock of his ex-girlfriend’s Smethport apartment, took his stuff and left some of hers, according to the Bradford Era newspaper, leading to burglary and trespassing charges.

For weeks, police in Sweden Township, Potter County, received complaints of a woman sneaking onto private property with a cat trap. According to the Potter Leader-Enterprise, they cuffed 69-year-old Mildred Williams on alleged cruelty to animals and other charges after she had a run-in with a homeowner. Police are asking for residents who encountered Williams to come forward as they put together a case.

An unknown person viciously pranked the Route 148 Car Wash in McKeesport and its customers by driving through the wash bays with open cans of paint in the back of his truck. Water jets splattered the paint onto equipment and the ceiling and it sprayed onto the two vehicles that next went through the wash, reports WTAE. One customer reported white splatters on her black, $50,000 2016 Lincoln MKX.