N. Korea Abandons Communism

SEOUL, South Korea — North Korea has officially made Kim Jong-il its “supreme leader” and his “military first” policy its guiding ideology, according to the text of the country’s newly revised Constitution made available on Monday.

The Constitution also declared for the first time that North Korea “respects and protects” the “human rights” of its citizens, and expunged the term “communism” from its text.

Well, I’m glad that’s finally cleared up. Now that everything is fine in North Korea we can finally start straightening out those damned Irish.