01 February 2010

[Choosing the appropriate form of wedding announcement can be tricky.]

A local radio station is in the process of giving away a "$50,000 dream wedding package." Last week, the station had listeners vote on which of five couples should receive the package. The winning couple was announced this past Friday. The wedding will take place in one week--yes, this Friday, at the Sunset Room at the National Harbor. Every day this week, listeners are encouraged to log in and vote on various aspects of the wedding.Today, listeners are to log into the station's web-site and vote on one of three bridal gowns, based on pictures of the bride in each. At least they're not forcing the bride to wear a three wolves shirt.

I've attended weddings in excess of $100,000. One particular extravaganza comes to mind. Think not just many open bars but ice sculpture vodka fountains; think skewers of fruit on arrival, and an appetizer hour after the ceremony that had not just tray-passed horsd'oeuvre but stations that included a caviar bar, a sushi bar, a made-to-order pasta bar, a baked potato bar, a carving station and more all before the multi-course, sit-down dinner; a string quartet for the ceremony and a twelve-piece band for the reception, and on and on. They even had a hot pretzel vendor handing out pretzels at 2 a.m. in the parking lot as people left. Only one disappointing aspect: They had plenty of people in monkey suits but no monkeys.

[Yeah, sometimes weddings are more about the bride.]

Still, that's a bit much for me. It was fun to attend but it's not my style. I have been a bride in two weddings. Resources were definitely finite but I was very pleased with both events, all the same. If someone had given me $50,000 with no strings attached to plan one of my weddings, I'd have certainly accepted it.

But they're not giving away $50,000. They're giving away a $50,000 wedding package that is provided in exchange for promotional advertising. That means the bride and groom are told which jeweler they get the rings from, who will be providing the catering, and on and on.

Now, I could have a kick-ass party for all my friends for $50,000, regardless of what options I got stuck with, but a wedding? That's a different thing. Shouldn't a wedding truly reflect the two people involved?

Which brings us to the question of the day: If you were planning to get married, would you hand over all the decisions to someone else so you could get a $50,000 wedding package?

It depends how much control I would have to give up to get the wedding package. Having to get a suit from Pretty Good Suits, Inc., would be fine, but having to wear a light blue suit with a puffy shirt would not.

No, why deprive my mom of all the fun? Was the only girl, I had no expectations or requirements - just easy going - we stayed for the whole party and was there the next day serving breakfast to folks dropping by. ALL about family and having a good time with family and friends.

If I could write my vows (which we did) & if I looked ok in the dress, then I'd be ok with it. I practically made my mom & bridesmaids take care of my details - other than the dress & & vows I didn't really care!

I'd do it, but it will be a cold day in hell when it happens, so as far as I'm concerned, it will be a miracle. And if someone wants to foot the bill for that miracle, I'll take it. And that means I could fly in all my blogger friends. Right?! AMIRITE?

Based upon the weddings I have attended over the years, those married in more elaborate weddings have marriages that last less than 10 years. Those married in simple ceremonies seem to have a much longer shelf life.

I'd feel like I was selling my soul, or at least the sould of my wedding if I went for a package like that. On the other hand those couples are potentially saving themselves or the bride's family a ton of money, especially if a big extravaganza was going to be in the works anyway.

Nah, no way. I wasn't thrilled with the planning process, but in the end we did it our way. I couldn't handle having no say, especially given some wacky ideas the wedding industry has foisted on the general public.

No way, under my point of view, a wedding is something way too personal to give someone else compete power over it. And, if I ever get married again, my plan is to have a BBQ in a park, with everyone in jeans, or on bicycles and spandex

My wedding kind of was like that. Parents paid, event was in that price range, and I wouldn't do it that way again, only because of the bickering. If someone else had all the control and left the parents out of it, no problem! The wedding is for show. The marriage is what's important.

Is it reeeaaally that different from a normal wedding? At least this time the intentions of your monetary benefactors are purely profit-driven, and they ask for promotion rather than guilt tripping you for months on end.

My best friend is getting married this summer and her soon-to-be mother-in-law is not only freaking out about the color scheme of the "wedding quilt," but also spending the summer in a camper with her husband about 200 feet away from my friend and her fiance's summer camp site.

...They will spend their first 3 months as newlyweds a football field away from the in-laws.