I’m relatively young and relatively hip, and while I know writing those two things down automatically makes one older and more unhip than they were two seconds ago, I categorize myself this way because what I’m about to say might make you assume I’m 70 years old with a permanent sour face and a “Stay Off The GRASS” sign on my sad, unmowed lawn:

I hate the idea of a Kindle.

I will never buy one, and I can’t fathom why anyone else would, either. At least anyone who works 9-12 hours a day on the computer.

Don’t you people want some time away from that damn screen?! (<–as my mom would say)

Books, while sometimes weirdly expensive, are a luxury. Their pages are perfectly aligned. They have a book smell. Thick ones tell the world that you’re intelligent and focused (or at least good at pretending to be) and thinner ones say that you’re a literary bandit. A Rumi or Kahlil Gibran volume on your nightstand assures your relationships that you are, indeed, a deep and romantic thinker. Conversations are started over books being read in coffee shops and on the subway. Books can be lent or borrowed. Books take up space. They’re real. Something to hold onto when you’re lonely or sitting on a park bench. Books are a nerdy kid’s best friend.

Plus, when you lose a book, you can just go out and buy a new one without wondering if your bank account is going to hate you.

No one was ever asked out for coffee based on what was on their Kindle. You can’t see what that hot, mysterious-looking guy is reading on the subway if he has a tiny electric screen shoved in his face. The selling point of a Kindle is that its lightweight; there’s no feeling proud after you finish page 822 of Moby Dick on a Kindle because there’s no last page to turn. Read more »

I apologize if the combination of this picture and the post title brings to mind disturbing images. It was unintentional

I took a walk this morning because the weather was simply too beautiful and I realized it’s been a couple days since I bought a lottery ticket. ?Near my apartment is a New York Lotto vending machine, tucked away in the corner of a deli next to a stand of stale looking powdered donuts. ?Last night, during one of my now common bouts of insomnia, I did a little research. ?According to NYLottery.org, the “White Ice 8′s” scratch-off ticket has the highest probability of winning you some cash. ?Just imagine: your investment of just $2.00 can come right back at you as $20,000.00. ?For those of you whose minds haven’t been blown by the possibility, let me repeat: that’s 10,000 times the amount of money you originally put in!?Can you imagine??? Two bucks! I have two bucks! Do I have two bucks? Wait, now. ?C’mon. ?I know?I?hadtwo dollars tucked in between that receipt for my Starbucks Vivanno and that other receipt for a pack of Moleskines. ?Whoa, did I really order three extra shots of espresso in my Vivanno at 55 cents per extra shot? What the hell is wrong with me? I’m definitely in no position to be spending money on overpriced “designer” drinks and notebooks, let alone throwing away a single penny of it on scratch off tickets. ?It’s a sad realization – considering just a year ago, successful self-employment had me feeling pretty great about my financial status. ?Great enough to buy multiple drinks from Starbucks in a day. ?Great enough to be okay with a twenty dollar lunch. ?Great enough to drop five hundred dollars on a pair of Jimmy Choos. ?Great enough to sign a two year lease with my 750 square foot apartment in the East Village. ?Of course, just a year later I make the decision of taking a break from “the greatness” of being a 23-year-old entrepreneur and find myself unemployed in this fun little recession of ours, wallowing in the disgust I harbor for the poor financial decisions I made the year before. ?

A friend of mine recently referred to this second year out of college as a “sophomore slump.” ?Considering myself a sophomore when I’m no longer a student is rather unnerving. ?This friend and I had both experienced very successful first years out of school, so how did we suddenly end up back at square one? And why doesn’t square one have padded walls and provide sedatives??