My 'stranged husband is alcoholic. He 'quit' drinking before we married (26 years ago)when I told him I'd marry him ONLY IF he went into a program. He did. I paid for it.

Now, 25 year old daughter newly engaged. Husb has been pretty well 'under cover' with it, and not actually dry, but only recently daughters actually noted he has sounded drunk on occasion. Quite a shock and upset for them.

Reason I posted here is that she said, yesterday, fiance upset 'cause she hadn't told him 'dad' under the influence when she told him about engagement. So they argued. Fiance a great guy, and will surely understand emotional ins and outs. My reason for posting: Daughter said that she is 'the only person on earth who can possibly get dad into rehab, nobody understands that burden.'

My father was an active, unpredictable alcoholic by the time I was old enough to remember him. He died when I was a kid, but the dynamics of an alcoholic family went on.

I attended Adult Child of Alcoholic meetings in my area in the late '80's. Nowadays, I attend Al Anon. They have helped me so much. Oh, and therapy with professionals who understood the dynamics in alcoholic families. Group experiential therapy especially helped me.

My Dad was an alcoholic and my mother became one. My Dad went to rehab several times, but it was always his choice. I was supportive because he was my Dad and it seemed normal to me. He was sober more than he wasn't and was a very high achiever, but he did struggle. Lost him in 1990 to cancer and I wish so much that I could talk to him now. I celebrated a year of sobriety in April.

20. Am afraid for my daughters, as their father is putting us thru it,

in different ways for each of us.

At the moment they think he's just swell, tho physically sick with something, and in hospital (maybe.) He won't allow, or they think they shouldn't, them to tell me where, tho trial re: property settlement set for this week. SO, daughters help him 'hide' from me, and don't want to hear about our financial 'story.'

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