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Topic: Dvorak on the plane (Read 42874 times)

As mentioned before, I also think it is important to remember that a person's reaction can differ from one trip/flight/day to another. If I would not be traveling with my son, I would have been thrilled at the impromptu concert! It isn't very often that I can hear string instruments without wearing headphones.

I was once on the same flight as LL Cool J - I would have been thrilled if he broke out with some old school freestyle street rap, but I'm sure many people would not have enjoyed it, despite LL Cool J being truly talented in the genre, just like the OP probably would not have enjoyed it if Metallica - widely considered a great heavy metal band - performed.

I don't like rap, but how fun would that have been if he'd done that? I'd have loved it.

Flying is stressful enough as it is. Why search for rudeness in a someone's generosity?

The thing is, you can be a talented massage therapist. If somebody agrees to an offer of a free massage you are indeed very generous. If you start to massage somebody without their consent, however, you are not generous but intrusive.

I was once on the same flight as LL Cool J - I would have been thrilled if he broke out with some old school freestyle street rap, but I'm sure many people would not have enjoyed it, despite LL Cool J being truly talented in the genre, just like the OP probably would not have enjoyed it if Metallica - widely considered a great heavy metal band - performed.

I don't like rap, but how fun would that have been if he'd done that? I'd have loved it.

Flying is stressful enough as it is. Why search for rudeness in a someone's generosity?

The thing is, you can be a talented massage therapist. If somebody agrees to an offer of a free massage you are indeed very generous. If you start to massage somebody without their consent, however, you are not generous but intrusive.

In some cases, music could be as intrusive for one person as a physical touch for another.

Which brings us back to "what if"-ing yourself into complete immobility. Shrill laughter can also be intrusive. If I follow your comments to their logical end, this means laughing in public is inappropriate. What a joyless world that would be. No laughter, no music.

Well, I think we need to differentiate between "in public" and "enclosed spaces where others can't escape from". And yes, I would actually say that if possible one might want to tone down the shrill laughter on a plane, too. That doesn't mean not laughter on a plane. I am not saying music via headphones on the plane would be wrong in any way. I just have my doubts as to whether it is at all polite to impose it to everyone in general risking the odds that enough people will like it that it is worth the discomfort or even pain it might cause some others.

If I were on this plane, I would be ticked. I think about when dH and I were coming back from France after a VERY long trip via Helsinki. We also had a long layover in Chicago and a long line in US Customs. On our flight home to MSP, if that orchestra started to play, I probably would have got up and destringed their violins. We were SO tired, grumpy and just wanted to get home. It was bad enough a baby screeched almost the entire trip... the poor mother tried her best, but our patience was severely limited after a long transatlantic trip, jet lag etc.

While it was a nice thought, there was not thought to the people who were in the middle of a very long trip, who were tired and wanted to sleep. Music is such a personal choice and I believe they overstepped by inflicting it on everyone without opportunity to opt out. What were people who didn't like it to do? Get up and be the party killers?

I wonder if many classical lover's answers here would have been different if some of my favourite artists, Deadmau5 or Nero, say, were on the plane, unpacked their decks and amps and started spinning dubstep at reasonable volume. Not something I would recommend as many might think there was a mechanical problem with the plane , but in my mind an analogous situation. I don't like most classical music. I think violins generally sound like someone is torturing a cat and it would not have been a gift to me, especially if a migraine was coming on.

I think that people should ask before intruding on another's space unnecessarily, be it physical, auditory or even olfactory and that it shouldn't be on the person being intruded on to have to speak up.

I wonder if many classical lover's answers here would have been different if some of my favourite artists, Deadmau5 or Nero, say, were on the plane, unpacked their decks and amps and started spinning dubstep at reasonable volume. Not something I would recommend as many might think there was a mechanical problem with the plane , but in my mind an analogous situation. I don't like most classical music. I think violins generally sound like someone is torturing a cat and it would not have been a gift to me, especially if a migraine was coming on.

Many of us have said that even if it weren't to our personal musical taste, we'd appreciate the distraction and the kindness involved, as well as the unique experience.

I think their intentions were good, but had I found myself in this situation I'd have gone out of my mind. This has nothing to do with the actual style of music, but being forced to listen to a racket (any racket) against my will in a situation I couldn't escape from.

I think sometimes people get etiquette confused with "I don't like x therefore anyone doing it in my presence is rude". I see that on this thread. Just because one does not like violins, it doesn't make what they did rude. Other people were no doubt enjoying the performance. So many people seem to expect that the world be tailored to their preferences and that they should never have to come across anything that they don't like. Sometimes we have to give way to others preferences. That's just the way the world works and it has nothing to do with etiquette.

If I were on this plane, I would be ticked. I think about when dH and I were coming back from France after a VERY long trip via Helsinki. We also had a long layover in Chicago and a long line in US Customs. On our flight home to MSP, if that orchestra started to play, I probably would have got up and destringed their violins.

Would you really have done this, or is this just written for effect?

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Music is such a personal choice and I believe they overstepped by inflicting it on everyone without opportunity to opt out. What were people who didn't like it to do? Get up and be the party killers?

I think the people who didn't like it should probably realise that the world doesn't revolve around them and that other people were enjoying the performance. Why be a party killer at all? Why not say to yourself "It's not to my taste, but others are enjoying it" ? Why must the world be tailored for *your* preference? (you general, not you specific)

I think the people who didn't like it should probably realise that the world doesn't revolve around them and that other people were enjoying the performance. Why be a party killer at all? Why not say to yourself "It's not to my taste, but others are enjoying it" ? Why must the world be tailored for *your* preference? (you general, not you specific)

I hear what you're saying and I even mostly agree with you, but what if it's not a matter of preference but of mental or physical health? PPs have already mentioned autistic people who'd react badly to this kind of performance, or people for whom it would trigger migraines. Music has an irrational effect on some people. I may love (most) classical music, but if I had been treated (and I don't mean that sarcastically - I know they'd mean well) to a concert with Celtic singing, I'd be a sobbing, hysterical mess, curled up in a fetal position, rocking with my hands over my ears*. Usually I can just walk away and it's no big deal, but in a situation such as this I couldn't.

However, I do realize they meant well, and that other people probably enjoyed it, which is why I agree with Toots that if they kept it under 6 minutes (I'd even say 10 minutes) it's not rude. Just keep it to that.

I think the people who didn't like it should probably realise that the world doesn't revolve around them and that other people were enjoying the performance. Why be a party killer at all? Why not say to yourself "It's not to my taste, but others are enjoying it" ? Why must the world be tailored for *your* preference? (you general, not you specific)

I hear what you're saying and I even mostly agree with you, but what if it's not a matter of preference but of mental or physical health? PPs have already mentioned autistic people who'd react badly to this kind of performance, or people for whom it would trigger migraines. Music has an irrational effect on some people. I may love (most) classical music, but if I had been treated (and I don't mean that sarcastically - I know they'd mean well) to a concert with Celtic singing, I'd be a sobbing, hysterical mess, curled up in a fetal position, rocking with my hands over my ears*. Usually I can just walk away and it's no big deal, but in a situation such as this I couldn't.

I think that's a bit different. What I'm questioning is the "I don't like this type of music, therefore it's rude and they should stop" angle, or even the "I'm tired and grumpy after a long flight therefore it's rude and they must stop" angle. I don't think their opinion or preference trumps that of those who *are* enjoying it.

But Maria - If you had had that reaction, no doubt the music would have stopped.

Everyday we are "treated" to sounds and situations we may not necessarily seek out. If it inconveniences you then you deal with it like a reasonable adult, yes? 6 minutes of music; be it Classical, Rap, or Bluegrass Banjos may annoy you because it isn't "your" thing, but could very well be a treasured memory for someone else.

IF it were to cause such a visceral reaction then surely you'd be prepared with earplugs or something anyway. I'm sure we've all gone into stores that are playing music that is not to our tastes. Or at a volume we don't like.

May I also add that while I do enjoy Classical I'm also currently thrashing Five Finger Death Punch and Disturbed in my car. You don't have to love a particular genre to appreciate good music.

But Maria - If you had had that reaction, no doubt the music would have stopped.

Everyday we are "treated" to sounds and situations we may not necessarily seek out. If it inconveniences you then you deal with it like a reasonable adult, yes? 6 minutes of music; be it Classical, Rap, or Bluegrass Banjos may annoy you because it isn't "your" thing, but could very well be a treasured memory for someone else.

IF it were to cause such a visceral reaction then surely you'd be prepared with earplugs or something anyway. I'm sure we've all gone into stores that are playing music that is not to our tastes. Or at a volume we don't like.

Which is why I'm saying it isn't rude - nor even inconsiderate - if kept to a reasonable time frame. I was just offering examples of reasons other than taste why people might not treasure such an experience.

I don't tend to carry earplugs around with me... first of all I've yet to find a pair that worked Secondly I've never yet been someplace where I was forced to stay and listen to the music - I can just leave. The closest I've come was while watching a movie at a theater (Troy I think...), but fortunately nobody notices if you hold your hands over your ears in the dark and on the back row

Six minutes could definitely trigger a migraine. I imagine it would be more than enough to trigger a reaction from somebody who has autism. And the reaction doesn't stop when the music stop. The pain the person is feeling continues when the music is over. So the music stopping once they notice somebody having a reaction is too little, too late.

Now, when we walk into stores with music we don't like we turn on our heels and walk right back out. People sitting on a plane don't have that option.