Call me paranoid but I’ve even taken to sneaking up on their conversations to try and catch them out.

So far it’s proved inconclusive, although I suspect Paw Patrol may be their codeword for grumpy sleep-deprived dad.

Occasionally, very occasionally, there’s a mix-up and they both sleep through. On these mornings there’s a tense atmosphere at breakfast. One of them has slept on duty and their brother is not happy. I assume a court marshal follows.

Our friends have a kids clock that has a light that’s red or green, parents set the time it turns green. They swear by it and their son is too scared to find out what would happen if he got up on red!! Luckily for them cos they don’t know either!

We should try that.
We do have a similar clock but none of us knew how it works, and the kids liked to change it.
The alarm on it would go off randomly. A steam train alarm that woke the whole street.
May give it a try again though.

Omg, this is us! Are you sure you aren’t living my life?! I gave up trying about a year ago, and now survive on roughly 4 hours sleep and a quarter of the bed space I’m entitled to. On a good night. Great post.

Ah, the familiar thumping of tiny feet across the landing. The instruction from a 2yo (goddamit) to “shove over” at 2am in the morning. The waking up curled in a corner at the foot of the bed with the gentle odour of an overfull nappy inches from your face. Sweet dreams indeed.