Movie Review: The 33

Will this movie end up being nothing but an empty shaft? -Steven Richard K

Remember that thing that happened on the news a few years ago? Remember the beginning middle and end of it? Turns out they made it into a movie. I’m talking about that news story I read the headline of (over the course of a couple weeks) but didn’t read the whole story. You know, the one where the Chilean miners got trapped in a mine.

I would imagine what they went through was harrowing. I would imagine their families were worried sick. I would imagine the mine company was worried about their interests and politicians had some motives and there were some people who were looking out for workers rights. Did you know they make it out alive? That’s probably how the movie is going to end. When they got out they were given free sunglasses as a brilliant promo for whatever the hell brand it was that gave it to them.

Did I mention this was all in a county that speaks Spanish? I wonder if I’m gonna be reading for the next 2 hours.

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Did you know 12,000 miners die every year? (According to this film)(Wow)(I wonder if that includes miners lung?)

Good news for people who don’t like to read. Except for a song and a couple news reports they speak English the whole time. Yes, even the president of Chile. Yup.

There was a character that was 2 weeks until retirement, so I guess its not just cop movies that use that trope. (God I hope that really happened. I don’t want to look it up because if they just added that for the one “joke” that you saw coming a million miles away. Quickly browsed the Wikipedia article on the actual collapse, no mention of anyone with plans to retire anywhere.)

The 33 is a horrible title. Here is a list of other titles I just came up with that they could have used instead:

Miners

Chile Down There

Hot Down There

Digging for Hope

Mining Dreams

The Shaft (this has double meaning because after they for out they got no compensation for their time trapped in the hole and almost dying. A judge ordered $1.8 million dollars be put aside on hold for the gents who were stuck in the hole. After a court battle the miners got nothing. I really hope they get a good chunk of money for this movie.)

I would rather have watched a well made documentary on this than a narrative movie. It would be more factual and informational. The situation is filled with natural drama that could have easily been shown using real footage. Sure it was the story of the how the guys dealt with being trapped but they were only about half the film.

They did do the thing at the end where they showed the actual people who this revolved around. The 33 miners were all hanging out on a beach in black and white. That was neat.

The 33 is out everywhere Friday 11/13.

TLDR: 1.5/5 Don’t bother. I didn’t care about the characters and the built in suspense was not utilized properly. In different hands this story could have been told better.