How to get the most out of a TED event

I’ve been fortunate enough to have gone to 14 TED events over the years, stretching back to the early days of the conference when it was still held in Monterey, California, and when the eponymous TEDTalk didn’t even exist. I’ve learned a few things over the years (sometimes the hard way!) and wanted to share a few pointers on how to have a great TED.

The TED experience (whether TED Conference or TEDx or any of the other spinoffs) is likely very different than anything you have ever experienced, and it’s worth knowing that going in (and maybe even doing a little planning).

The first thing to know: every TED event is an extraordinarily engaging and exhausting experience! You’re likely to leave with you head overwhelmed from the ideas you’ve been exposed to, and your heart overflowing from the connections you’ve made. If you’re completely spent and maybe even a little confused at the end of it all, don’t worry – that means you did it right.

Here’s my list of suggestions I give to everyone that’s attending for the first time. Hope it proves useful!

Come well rested, well hydrated, and clear of commitments. This is not the usual conference, where you can be partially checked in and get partial value for attending. Every moment of the TED experience tends to have richness and opportunity in it – it’s best to be able to shut out the outside world entirely, and truly immerse yourself.

Introduce yourself to EVERYONE (yes, everyone). Every single person at a TED or TEDx event is there because he or she is curious and excited, and curious and excited types are incredibly approachable. We spend most of our lives out in the real world, where introducing oneself to everyone is frowned upon – at TED events, it’s the norm. Because this is so unusual for most of us, I encourage everyone to make the commitment to themselves to hold eye contact and introduce themselves to the first five people they meet at the event, just to practice!

Also know that it’s completely acceptable to violate typical cocktail party protocol at TED events and join in on groups that have already formed – be polite about it, by all means, but feel free to sit down at an empty seat at a table and introduce yourself, or join a circle of people talking at a break.

Another benefit of introducing yourself to a lot of people early – you will see the same people throughout the day (or days), and it’s quite handy to have friendly faces to approach between sessions.

TED events tend to to draw thinkers and explorers that are willing to engage in quite deep conversations quite quickly. Come prepared with questions that catalyze interesting conversation. Rather than the usual “so what do you do?” try: “so what are you most passionate about?” or “what was the last life-changing book you read” or “if you could travel anywhere in the world for one afternoon where would it be?”

Commercial speech is frowned upon, from the stage and during the breaks. It’s completely fine to make connections at TED events that eventually turn into business relationships, but avoid pitches.

Ride the emotional wave. You’re likely to feel joy and sadness, anxiety and ease, and even join the speaker on his or her journey while the stories are being told from stage. Stay present and aware as this unfolds – it’s part of the TED journey.

Finally, it’s good to be aware that there’s a well-known phenomenon that most people experience after TED events shut down, alternately referred to as the “TED hangover” or “TED withdrawal”. It’s a real thing, and it’s worth being prepared for. TED events tend to be such overstimulating and wonderful events that “re-entry” back into the real world can be difficult.

In my experience, one of the best antidotes to this TED withdrawal is to stay in touch with the incredible people you met at the event, and get busy thinking about the next event you’re going to attend.