A Marker.

Two years. Two years ago, HUSBAND picked up his slut-whore (SW) at the airport and let her sit in my seat of our car. Two years ago, he drove off from the airport and headed to a neighboring resort town, pointing out sites along the way to a woman who had no business being with him, other than to fuck.

Two years ago, he walked on the beach with SW, and they ate the lunch he had packed in our kitchen in our home. Two years ago, he got a phone call while on the beach from my mother, arranging kids since I was out of town.

Two years ago, SW and HUSBAND went into a local famous watering hole, asking the bartender for a good eatery suggestion. Two years ago, they walked down the street of the town holding hands til they got to the local spot…and two years ago, HUSBAND called that bartender back to thank him for such a great recommendation.

Two years ago, HUSBAND and SW returned to the hotel and fucked, and in the morning, after another fuck, went down to eat some breakfast…SW wearing a fake wedding set since she ‘knew HUSBAND would not take his ring off, and didn’t want to look like a (ready for this) mistress.’

Two years ago, SW asked HUSBAND ‘how he’d liked it…being a real couple’ and pushed him to take the next steps. Two years ago, as they drove to the airport and sat in the cell phone lot, SW prodded HUSBAND to make the appointment with the divorce attorney and to remember, ‘they’d come too far to turn back now.’

Two years ago, SW got on the plane and flew back to her life of lies, and into the arms of her live-in lover. Two years ago, HUSBAND picked me up at that same airport just a couple hours later, and I got in my seat of our car oblivious that the filthy DNA of a whore was present and that HUSBAND was cloaked in illicit sex and deceit and false smiles and pretend greetings.

Two years ago, someone saw HUSBAND and SW.

Two years ago, the carefully crafted house of flimsy cards was poised to fall.

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42 thoughts on “A Marker.”

He didn’t took his wedding ring off?? So SW got herself a fake ring ?!?!? WTF??? If that wasn’t so fucked up, it would have been hilarious.
Two years…. and I’m sure it still feels like it was just a few days ago….
*hugs*

Yes…he had a bizarre personal boundary about his ring. Although he did contemplate in the last affair since it turned emotional too, and he intended to leave our marriage. Can you believe she wore a fake set? Per HUSBAND, when he saw the rings on her left hand, he asked if it was the wedding set of her deceased mom. She told him no…she looked for that set but couldn’t find it, so it was just a fake set…so she wouldn’t “look like she was his mistress.” HELLO. SHE WAS HIS FUCKING MISTRESS. You’re right, in a macabre sort of way, it is hilarious. HUGS to you too.

Pity that boundary only reached his ring and not what the ring stands for….
It is pure silliness. Mine also was extremely worried about hurting my feelings, but that didn’t stop her either. In the end, what matters is really not what you intend or pretend to be, but it’s what you are doing.
If you’re fucking a married man…. Surprise, surprise…. You’re a fucking mistress, no matter what you wear or feel.

It is a bizarre game they all play…these affair partners. “We aren’t that kind of people…” Uh, hello. Yes, you are. You are fucking cheaters, plain and simple. On the ring thing…crazy that somehow keeping his ring on meant he wasn’t crossing a boundary as he put the key in the hotel room, pulled down the sheets, etc etc. I still don’t get it.

Yeah, I do get it either. Somehow in his mind, that made it less bad. He could still say that he never once took his ring off? Of course, it means nothing if he cheats. I dunno. Crazy fuckers the whole lot of them.

Being self-absorbed, wanting excitement and escaping from reality and becoming as corrupt as the people they engage with. For those not having these capacities/attributes it is unfathomable. I like “Moonstruck” “a fear of dying”, it is a metaphor for a fear of living reality and all the mundanely that goes with it. Dirty encounters are like a drug-induced high. Making it “fit”…it does not fit, it cannot be justified! The justifications applied are as distorted as the distorted thinking of the cheating person.

the ring…a no brainer unfortunately. Please do not see it as wanting to be loyal to you. Once he was in playing mode, he did not even think about his wife and children. That is the ugly reality. He has a lot of work to do. You can tell him “thank goodness, I am not you” as I could not live with myself if I were”.

My husband never wore his ring because of work and the gym. She on the other hand was/is engaged at the time of their affair. Once he decided he wanted to work on us he put it on and now never takes it off unless at the gym. At this point I don’t understand his logic behind it, he should’ve been wearing it all along.
I can’t believe your husband’s whore wore a fake set. I’m shaking my head thinking she’s an idiot. Wow, just wow!!!

Gold-diggers go after married men. Married men wanting action, are not hiding that they are married. It makes them more attractive to easy women. Married man are settled, have money, are less prone to having an STI, all stuff gold-diggers want. The ultimate goal of the gold-digger is trying the catch the married rich guy and the power it gives the gold-digger! They feed on that power, but they often lose, because most married men are not leaving their loyal wives, they are players. I refer to these women as predators. There are male version too. Some make quite a good living out of it.
There are entire websites written on how to become the ultimate winning gold digger. What to say, what to do, etc.

Loser never took off his wedding ring. He was proud of the fact that he had never had it off since the day we were married (like his daddy.) When he told me about his latest WTC, I refused to sit in his car. We always took mine. Like you, I wasn’t going to put my butt on the same seat that WTC had put hers. You’d think the tramps would think the same thing, wouldn’t you…but if they’re willing to fuck somebody elses’ husband, expecting them to want “their own seat” is stretching it a bit, I guess. Loser had already given me Herpes…I wasn’t going to take a chance of getting something else.
How can these pieces of shit be so insensitive? Oh! That’s right! It’s ALL ABOUT THEM!

A good thing….the one time I had a drink with Loser, I got sick and threw up all over his car. I was thinking “ha. let his WTC sit in my puke!” He cleaned it up…but I know it’s still there!
I wish I could get nominated for an award that YOU hadn’t already been nominated for! LOL.

Oh SS I’m so sorry. My two years is coming up too so I’m right there with you. I’m scared of the feelings and triggers that will come. I wish we were never put into all this pain by the people who took vows to love, honor, cherish and protect us. But here we are surviving something we thought two years ago would kill us. At least I thought it would. You are doing amazing in your journey of healing. Hang in there. (((Hugs)))

Oh FC…I still have those frozen moments where I can’t breathe and realize I AM A BETRAYED SPOUSE WITH A HUSBAND WHO CHEATED. Really???????????? I seriously still cycle through denial – when am I going to wake up from this nightmare – thank you for your support. And we are completely surviving. Let us support you as you approach those trigger dates…we get it, FC. We understand. HUGS.

Accepting it as a reality is the hardest for those who were the most trusting. Therefore in relationships where both cheat…the aftermath is so different. No comparison. This is also the reason why so much research is flawed and why so many so-called helpful websites put blame on both partners for disconnection.

Yes. Someone saw them, and a few weeks later, sent HUSBAND an anonymous note (from an email he didn’t know, signed Sid Breeze) that indicated he’d been seen…that he needed to come clean…if not, they would reach out to me. And that “they would know if he had done so or not.” Six weeks later, I got an email from the same person and it all began to unravel…

Keep your head high. The SW’s DNA will not stick to a woman of integrity and loyalty. You are so much better. Think about Eleanor Roosevelt “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent”.
Hugs

What a strange thing. . About the ring I mean.. anyway, I hope you are ok despite these bad memories coming back to haunt you. I believe that staying with a cheating partner comes at quite a high price.. it was too high for me… But I have a very hard time rebuilding trust in someone, once it’s gone.. I wish you peace and Happiness only, for the future!! 💜

Thank you so much for the good thoughts. I understand completely about the price…and don’t second guess your decision AT ALL. For me, when I have these memories, I go ahead and look at them, feel them, grieve them, and put them into the box again, and back on the shelf where I hope, one day, they will remain. HUGS, and happiness for the future to you too!

I think the ring remaining on is a symbol. Telling SW that he ain’t going nowhere. He will fuck around all he likes. But he’s MARRIED so not leaving for her. It’s a subtle (or not-so-subtle) power play. Hey. I CAN have my cake and eat it. So there.

Yes, that is a likely interpretation too.. I also think the other person here had a good point.. that maybe he made his infidelity “less serious” (in his own mind), by seeing he still had the ring on, so he didn’t really “leave” the marriage or abandon the vows (although he did temporarily when cheating). Who knows. But interesting thought there, could very well be a statement to the woman he was cheating with..

A skank with a wedding band from a Cracker jack box and a cheater with a devining rod dick,,,….Sounds like a Harlotquin Whoremance book ……..I’ll be looking for it in the trash sale bin……..SS please tell me that SW knows about this blog.+.

Back at you Miss SS……Sorry to hear that she doesn’t know, think it does them good to see in print what bottom feeders they are. Oh hell, silly me, a woman trying to not look like a mistress already knows she’s a whore.

Oh, those markers. Dwelling on them doesn’t really help us heal, but it does take a while to get them out of the system. Boy, do I know that. I say thank goodness he got lazy and sloppy and paraded her around where someone saw and had the good sense to out him. Hallelujah to whoever that was! My husband never took his ring off either… he was just too lazy and probably thought he would lose it at some point. It is so strange that she was doing something so awful and wrong and yet, she didn’t want to look like a mistress. Delusional, senseless behavior. Hugs today, lovely lady! Another milestone in the books. ❤

I know that anger all too well! How disgusting these humans are! My husband told me on Christmas Eve he would be spending the morning after getting off work at the fire department, looking for a bike for my sons present. He called after he got off and said he was stopping by another station to eat breakfast with “the guys”. He came home with no bike, swearing the entire city of Jacksonville had none that were suitable! I found out a few days later, he was spending the morning with his fucking whore, having breakfast and coffee at Panera! It took me 5 years before I could even step foot in any Panera!
I am loving your writing style…it’s healing….it’s raw….it’s real! I look forward to reading more! Until then, keep your head up and know she did you a huge favor! He doesn’t deserve you! 🙂

Damyanti Biswas is an author, blogger, animal-lover, spiritualist. Her work is represented by Ed Wilson from the Johnson & Alcock agency. When not pottering about with her plants or her aquariums, you can find her nose deep in a book, or baking up a storm.