The Recovering Farmer

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Valentines Day

Dare I go here? It is early morning on February 13. I was to go to a meeting today but when I dragged my sorry butt out of bed at 5:00 this morning I had received a text, during the night, saying the meeting was cancelled. Okay, I have just varnished the truth a tad. At 5:00 this morning I actually, gently, I might add, suggested to my wife that it was time for her to get up. Just trying to help. It was actually 5:30 when I got up. For some strange reason I started singing that song, “good morning, good morning, we talked the whole night through, good morning, good morning to you”. Strange, because that didn’t happen. I mean talking the whole night through. No, really, where could that have come from?

Of course. Tomorrow is Valentine’s day. Yesterday the questions began. What are you doing for your wife on Valentine’s day? What are you going to buy her? You have a meeting here on Thursday, what are you going to buy us? Hang on a minute. Why is no one asking me what I will be getting? Is anyone bringing me chocolates? My memory isn’t that great but I don’t think anyone has ever bought me flowers, or chocolates, or diamonds for Valentine’s day. What’s up with that? Is this a gender thing? Are guys supposed to take the lead here? So many questions, so few answers.

So just to make sure I understand this, something that should have happened years ago, I googled Valentine’s day. Turns out it really began as a religious holiday. Then it morphed into something totally different. I will spare you a history lesson. It actually is rather boring. All I know is that the onus is on me to do something romantic.

When I was asked yesterday what I would be getting for my wife I became somewhat snide. In the words of one of my colleagues I became cheeky. Cheeky? Who me? As most of you know that would not be like me. Perhaps my defenses were up. I had not planned ahead for this special day coming up, when I need to express my love in ways that cost so much money and, in all likelihood, are so ineffective. After all I am a romantic, through and through. NOT.

My first response was to tell these folks that I had been married for thirty one years and so what if I did nothing special and besides that my wife does not appreciate flowers and on top of that what am I getting and besides that what is the worst thing that will happen and anyways I have something more important to be thinking about so there. Wow, almost lost my breath on that one. This is really getting to me.

Do I need to re-visit this? Perhaps. After my little rant yesterday one of the participants in this debate asked me why my wife had stuck with me all these years. That floored me. Good question. Not sure myself. That in itself is reason enough to do something special. Through thick and thin I have had a partner. I have struggled with so much crap in my life, most of it self-induced, and she has been there. Shown me the way. Helped me overcome hurdles that I had come to believe were unsurpassable. Never given up on me. Joined me on my journey. That is special. That defines a true friend. A partner. For that I will always be thankful. So instead of flowers, or diamonds, or chocolates here is a tribute to someone that has made my life special. Make it a good one.