Before having a baby, I rarely thought about incontinence. The only time it crossed my mind was when I would visit my grandparents in the nursing home and I would hear the crinkle of Depends from the lady walking slowly down the hall in front of me. It certainly was something I never identified with personally. As I walked down the nursing home halls and passed the Depends Lady, I never thought "Someday, that will be me."

That changed during my postpartum recovery, and I'm still coming to terms with it.

Two and a half year ago, in a mom-baby play group when my son was just a few weeks old, the subject of incontinence came up. Everyone chuckled, because so many of us could relate to sneeze-peeing and cough-peeing. Someone mentioned that they had gotten a prescription for a pessary and it was really helping her be more active and comfortable. Weird, I thought. I won't ever need that.

Then, my aunt shared with me that she was dealing with pelvic organ prolapse. She had been dealing with symptoms for some time, like stress incontinence and a feeling like having a tampon in that was too low, and had finally sought medical attention. She was facing the decision of whether to have surgery to try to correct her bladder prolapse, or just live with it and try to prevent further damage and discomfort with physical therapy and using a pessary. My aunt and I both birthed big babies and we share lots of familial genetic traits. When medical issues come up for her, I pay attention, because it gives me a window into what might be down the road for me.

In the past six months, I've noticed an increased feeling of pressure in my pelvic area, especially if I do any kind of impact activity. Dancing, jumping, or running would send me right away to the bathroom to empty my bladder. I also started feeling the urge to pee about every hour.

Urge frequency, stress incontinence, pelvic pain. It was harder and harder to ignore the discomfort.

Some people who have a "just grin and bear it" attitude about incontinence (like the video above). Or a "ignore it and just get back in the game" mentality about postpartum recovery. As if there is a different body other than the one you live in right now that you can get "back" to.​I guess that works for some, but for me, I'm not ok with leaking, or restricting myself from being physically active for fear that it's going to cause me to leak or just feel really uncomfortable. I'm also not ok with the idea that just because I've had a baby, it's going to be this way now for the rest of my life.

There are things that can be done. This is not how it has to be just because I've had a baby. The same is true for you.

I sought a referral to a women's health physical therapist, and I also made an appointment with my OB/GYN to talk about my symptoms. It turns out I have a Stage 2 cystocele, or bladder prolapse. She recommended I try a pessary.

I've been doing a pelvic floor physical therapy protocol, mamalates, and using a pessary for several months now, and it truly has changed my life. A pessary works like a hammock to help support pelvic organs that have shifted from their optimal position. I wear mine most of the time, and my discomfort has gone down to zero.

If things don't feel right "down there," don't ignore it. While it's common, it's not normal. Let us be the generation that breaks the silence around pelvic floor health.