SOUP NAZI: All right, now listen to me. You have been a good friend. I have an armoire in my basement. If you want to pick it up, you're welcome to it. So, take it, it's yours.

KRAMER: How can I possibly thank you?

SOUP NAZI: You are the only one who understands me.

KRAMER: You suffer for your soup.

SOUP NAZI: Yes. That is right.

KRAMER: You demand perfection from yourself, from your soup.

SOUP NAZI: How can I tolerate any less from my customer?

CUSTOMER: Uh, gazpacho, por favor.

SOUP NAZI: Por favor?

CUSTOMER: Um, I'm part Spanish.

SOUP NAZI: Adios muchacho!

KRAMER: Git.

JERRY: It was stupid of me.

SHEILA: Well, it was very insulting.

JERRY: No. I know. I - I was really sort of half-kidding.

SHEILA: Well, behind every joke there's some truth.

JERRY: What about that Bavarian cream pie joke I told you? There's no truth to that. Nobody with a terminal illness goes from the United States to Europe for a piece of Bavarian cream pie and then when they get there and they don't have it he says " Aw, I'll just have some coffee." There's no truth to that.

SHEILA: Well, I guess you're right.

JERRY: So, am I forgiven, shmoopy?

SHEILA: Yes, shmoopy.

JERRY: Aw!

SUSAN: Hey, Jerry!

JERRY: Oh, hi Susan, George. You remember Sheila.

GEORGE: Oh, yes. Hello.

SHEILA: Hello. Won't you join us?

GEORGE: No, thanks.

SUSAN: Of course.

GEORGE: Yes. Well -- So, uh, sit on the same side at a booth, huh?

JERRY: Yeah. That's right. You got a problem?

GEORGE: I, uh, just think it's a little unusual. Two people to sit on one side...and leave the other side empty.

JERRY: Well, we're changing the rules.

GEORGE: Ahh. Good for you.

SUSAN: Aw, what are you getting George?

GEORGE: I don't know, honey. What do you want to get? [in babying voice] I want you to get anything you want...'cause I love you so much. I want you to be happy. Okay, sweetie?

SUSAN: Oh, George, you're so sweet.

GEORGE: Well, I could be a little sweetie tweetie weetie weetie.

SUSAN: Aww!

JERRY: What about you, shmoopy? How 'bout a little tuna? You want a little tuna fishy?

SHEILA: Yeah.

JERRY: Yum yum little tuna fishy?

GEORGE: Come here.

[George & Susan begin making out; Jerry & Sheila begin making out in order to keep up]

KRAMER: And..voila!

ELAINE: [gasps]

KRAMER: Yeah.

ELAINE: Oh! Oh, I love it! I absolutely love it!

KRAMER: Yeah. Did the K Man do it or did the K Man do it?

ELAINE: The K Man did it!

KRAMER: Yeah!

ELAINE: [laughing] How much did you pay for this thing?

KRAMER: How 'bout zero?

ELAINE: What?

KRAMER: Yeah.

ELAINE: What? Who's was it? Where'd you get it?

KRAMER: I'll tell ya where I got it. I got it from the guy you so callously refer to as the Soup Nazi.

ELAINE: Get out!

[Elaine pushes on Kramer's chest, causing in to fall backwards through her swinging door]

ELAINE: The Soup Nazi gave it to you?

KRAMER: Yeah.

ELAINE: Why?

KRAMER: Well, I told him the whole story and he just let me have it. Wha -- Yeah. He's a wonderful man.

ELAINE: [gasps]

KRAMER: Yeah. Well, a little bit misunderstood but, uh....

ELAINE: Well, I'm just gonna go down there and personally thank him. I mean, I had this guy all wrong. This is wonderful!

KRAMER: Yeah. Well, he's a dear.

GEORGE: How much tip do you leave on $8.15?

SUSAN: You know sweetie, I just want you to know that I was so proud of you today expressing your feelings so freely in front of Jerry and all. Just knowing that you're not afraid of those things is such a great step forward in our relationship.

ELAINE: You're through Soup Nazi. Pack it up. No more soup for you. Next!

NEWMAN: [panting] Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

JERRY: What is it?

NEWMAN: Something's happened with the Soup Nazi!

JERRY: Wha - wha - what's the matter?

NEWMAN: Elaine's down there causing all kinds of commotion. Somehow she got a hold of his recipes and she says she's gonna drive him out of business! The Soup Nazi said that now that his recipes are out, he's not gonna make anymore soup! He's moving out of the country, moving to Argentina! No more soup, Jerry! No more for of us!

JERRY: Well, where are you going?

NEWMAN: He's giving away what's left! I gotta go home and get a big pot!