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Neurotoxins

Here are some things making my neurons misfire a bit:

1) It snows in December in upstate NY. This apparently surprises many residents in our fair city. On the plus side, it does give meaning to their lives to endlessly obsess on the state of the streets and share their keen observation with the rest of us that snow makes navigating the city a bit more difficult and treacherous. Who knew?

2) Teachers and SWAT teams unite. Apparently arming teachers and administrators is deemed serious thinking and serious policy. Let’s just cut to the chase– let’s consolidate schools and police into a single public institution. We all know consolidation solves every policy problem and , if you reflect a bit, you also realize that those who enter and excel at the profession of teaching, without a doubt, make the best candidates to handle weapons and take down assailants with assault weapons, body armor and violent rage. On the flip side, think about how awesome a SWAT team of former kindergarten teachers would be. Did you know that they are filming a prequel to Rambo showing how Rambo became such a ruthless killer — think Rambo meets Kindergarten Cop sans the Austrian accent. Also look for the sequel to Dead Poets Society where Robin Williams inspires his students to take the movie title literally; soundtrack by Ted Nugent.

3) Fiscal Cliff Diving — we basically have a political party , the Republican, with zero interest or capability to govern yet they are treated as serious by the media, because, you know, we need to hear both sides even when one clearly jumped the shark and spouts policy with no basis in economic reality.

4) A snowy day in December disproves global warming. Who knew? Apparently when we talk of global issues , we need only look outside our front window because what better way to assess and reflect on global issues than limiting ourselves to only what happens in our front yard.