Putting a Humorous Twist on the Mundane

Dear Baby: Once Upon a Halloween

Once upon a time your daddy had a dream. He wanted to be married, he wanted you for a baby and he also wanted a home for you to grow up in. Last year, Daddy and I moved to Maryland. You were still in Momma’s tummy. We had the pleasure of working with a very nice and extremely patient realtor (patience is important because Momma likes to try every one’s patience). She helped us search high and low for the perfect home to buy and wouldn’t you know it? We did.

The owner’s accepted our offer with out complaint and on this day in history – 2011 to be exact – Daddy and I closed on our very first home – your home.

We celebrated the closing by going to Costco. Yes that’s right – Costco. While we were there we purchased an aerobed to sleep on. Then we continued celebrating all the way to Walmart where we purchased sheets, pillows, pillow cases, plastic silverware, paper plates, a couple of towels, toilet paper, some grocery stuff….Momma could go on all night with the list and if it weren’t for the Trick o Treaters at the door, I would.

After dinner, we came home. Our new neighborhood was swamped with vertically-challenged ghouls and goblins. But, alas, Daddy and I weren’t prepared to pass out candy. So, we unloaded the car, went inside and turned off all the lights on the main floor.

Daddy set up his boy-toy computer in the bedroom while Momma set up the aerobed and when we were all done, we crawled into the bed and watched movies on Daddy’s computer. It was a great Halloween.

I know we don’t live there right now but don’t you worry. We still own that house that Daddy bought for us and someday we’ll go back there.

We hadn’t planned on moving so soon but that’s a different letter. Someday, when Daddy is retired Momma will write that letter and it will begin: Dear Navy, Really???

Until then baby,

Happy Halloween to you! You are the best treat Momma and Daddy have ever had and that’s no trick.