Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Caught Slippin'

PYB welcomes in a guest columnist from the Arizona desert. Keeping in mind that this here blog was started as a collaborative effort, we welcome the input. Unfortunately for all our readers, it doesn't seem you're getting a glass-half-full viewpoint this time either. But let's all give a warm welcome to the Ghost of Todd Peat, as he takes center stage and tests his mettle. (FYI, forgive formatting errors below. BlogSpot sucks cock.) And yes, we let him fucking post here despite what may be construed as a sentence of support for Frank Solich. He also uses too many curse words for our taste.
Let's go:

Bo Pelini called Nebraska fans fair-weather. Get over it.
This is not a reason to fire your coach. It isn’t icing on the cake. It isn’t
the straw that broke the camel’s back. It is the truth.

As Nebraska fans we are spoiled. We’ve had 2 of the 5 most
dominant teams of all time (95 and 83*) The media constantly brands us the
classiest and most loyal fans in the country. Yet week after week and season
after season we behave in such a way that embarasses the program. Yes, I would
argue even more embarrassing than Pelini’s fuck-laced tirade.

Reasons why Nebraska fans embarrass the program worse than
Pelini:

Evidence #1:
Unreasonable expectations

2 years removed from a National Title berth, Frank ‘the rat’
Solich is fired with a 10-3 team. (Yes I am aware he didn’t coach the bowl
game. We were so much better than Michigan State that win was a lock). We set a
bad precedent firing a 10 win coach. The fans were discontent though, arguing
that Solich was letting the program slip. Slip from what though?

Let’s remember that Nebraska’s run from 93-97 was one of, if
not the single most, dominant run in college football history. We lost just 3
games in 5 seasons. This includes the missed FG in the 1994 Orange Bowl that
prevented us from our 4th championship of the decade. (Alabama has lost 5 in
their stretch of 5 year dominance). We went to 7 straight ‘BCS-caliber’ bowls
from 91-97.

Yes, the program slipped. Of course it slipped. It was never
going to remain that good. So frank was out the door… and Houston Nutt was here
to save the day. Oh wait!? Our savior turned down the job. Could it be that
nobody wants a job where you get fired with a 10 win season?

Evidence #2: Understanding
the game: Yards don’t matter

Stop talking about giving up 600 yards. It makes us look
stupid. Does anyone know how many yards Alabama gave up to Texas A&M? 628.
It goes without saying Wyoming isn’t Texas A&M. The point remains. We are
in a new era in football. The days of 3 yards and a cloud of dust are behind
us. 28 teams are averaging over 500 yards a game right now, 70 over 400.

Baylor is leading the nation, currently averaging 735 yards
per game. Last year they averaged 587 yards per game for the entire season.
Teams gain more yards now. Teams run more plays now* Stop bitching about the
yards. It’s about being competitive. It’s about wins.

Evidence #3:
Oblivious to quality of talent required to win

Stop talking about the fucking walk on program. They are
glorified practice players. Just stop. They fill gaps at punter or full back.
We aren’t going to return to glory because we added 20 extra Nebraska corn-fed
boys that run 5 second 40’s. The game is speed. Nebraskans’ don’t have it. (Editor's note: NU doesn't use 40-yard times. They don't "believe" in it. Fucking A."

Evidence #4:
Don’t grasp basics of recruiting

Like it or not the game is recruiting and recruits like new
uniforms. Nebraska fans suddenly act like Oregon is Nebraska-West because of
Scott Frost. They have hundreds of options for game day if you include shoes,
socks, face masks, pants, and jerseys. We have one black alternate uniform and
the nebraska geezers think it is the apocalypse. 98% of Nebraska fans have
never heard of twitter, but when the uniforms were released recruits were
talking about them on twitter. That is a good thing.

You can’t find one fucking black shirt in your closet for
the game? Not one? Oh that’s right- Tom Osborne and Bob Devaney never had
blackouts.The sea of red can be black for one game. Life will go on. (editor's note: their only black shirts are now gray from the hundreds of washings their 1994 National Champions tee shirts have endured)

Evidence #5: Wanting
to fire Pelini this week because he insulted fans

The reason you want him gone is because he insulted you?
This isn’t about you. This is about the team, this is about winning. The
Nebraska fan that brings up Pelini insulting them are welcome to jump ship, go
root for creighton (half of you do it during basketball season anyways). The
reason Pelini’s job should be in question is his inability to win big
games.And for the record, fuck Nebraska
fans that leave the game early. (Editor's note: NU would have lost by 30 points had Braxton Miller not been injured in this fucking game.)

Evidence #6: Its
the 3rd game of the year

It is the 3rd game of the year. Nebraska fans and former
players alike have made national news with their rumblings. Imagine how stupid
we are going to look in 6 weeks. We play SDSU, Illinois, Purdue, and Minnesota.
Barring any unforeseen disaster we will be 6-1. Nobody wants to coach for a
school that throws a fit everytime they lose. In the weak Big 10 its not out of
the question that we could win 10 games. How fucking stupid do we look
complaining about/ firing another coach with a 10 win season? (Editor's note: NU made the national news again? Yay!)

Conclusion:

I’m not a Pelini fan. Infact, I think it’s time for him to
go. But the reasons people are giving make Nebraska look worse than our play on
the field. Let’s pump the brakes. It is week 3. Let the season finish out and
if he continues to put an inferior product on the field firing him makes sense.
He is regularly out coached (Wyoming, UCLAx2, Wisconsnx3, OSU, Michigan,
Northwestern). He regularly loses big games. He regularly gets blown out of big
games. The reason Pelini should be gone is because he hasn’t won a single big
game since he has been here. Not because he insulted you, not because he has
alternate uniforms, not because his defense gave up 600 yards, and most
importantly not because he isn’t TO or BD.

Nebraska fans need to grow up. This isn’t the 90’s. There is
one coach in all of college football that is as good as TO and it is Nick
Saban. He isn’t coming to Nebraska anytime soon. So get more realistic
expectations.

But getting a new coach won’t fix all these problems. There
is a systemic problem at Nebraska; the fans are cutting off the nose to spite
the face. Our behavior as fans is needlessly self destructive. We have a
backwards view of the way things work. We are spoiled. We have no concept of
what it actually takes to recruit, compete, and win in the 21st century.
Nebraska fans need to realize things have changed.

And just a side note: The names flying around the husker
illustrated message board to replace Bo is a perfect depiction of just how out
of touch we are (Editor's note: You have fucking problems if you read the HI Message Board. We got booted off all of those 15 years ago for telling the truth! And we have not heard of three of the coaches listed below):

*For all those Nebraska fans that LOOOOVE Oregon. Their
offense is perfect evidence: In 2003 they averaged 384 yards per game on 70.47
plays per game. In 2012 they averaged 540 yards per game on 80.61 plays. We see
that not only are there more plays per game, there are more big plays.