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File This Under Things You Can’t Unsee

There are a multitude of things in life that you just wish you hadn’t seen, or heard. Like diaper changes after pureed peas, or a spouse’s bodily functions, there are things that burns themselves onto your retinas.

This morning, as I powered through a very special hour of cardio, designed to undo the previous evening’s caloric sh*t-storm courtesy of a very special Girl Scout delivery, I happened to look up and catch a few moments of pure television gold. Unfortunately this television happened to be hanging just above the douchebag talking on the phone while peddling a stationary bike (or possibly pretending to talk while bike in oder to secure the piece of equipment with the best view of the spinning class going on just behind the glass). But I digress just because douchebag was my word-of-the-day.

Back to the story, behold… what I would like to file under things you just can’t unsee:

And for those blessed souls who can’t see this video, here is a screenshot because no one escapes this…

Kathie Lee was not talking during the capturing of this screenshot... I believe this may be her "I'm too sexy" face or something... sadly indicating that she thought this was sexy.

Ahhh, Kathie Lee, you’re a slightly less dangerous Charlie Sheen without the septum degradation. I would take issue with the fact that you still have a job even though you share a pharmacist with Paula, but seeing you each morning is like hanging out with a sorority girl on a bender without all of the messy side-effects.

However, I do take issue with the fact that, like Marisa Tomei, Kathie Lee is ruining my romanticized notions of hot, never-aging vampires. Isn’t she supposed to be like *really* old?