A satirical blog about media, marketing, advertising, politics, pop culture, etc. All references to actual companies, products, people, etc. is for the purpose of parody. All writing is copyright by Greg Medernach, and is mostly intended as absurdist humor, and as a portfolio of comedy and creative advertising material. Questions and Comments: unconditionedresponse@yahoo.com

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Assault Rifle BB Guns

Where I live, we constantly get junk mail stuff from some
local sporting goods store, and always printed on the front of this
newspaper-looking ad thingy are many BB guns that are designed to look exactly
like well-known classic assault rifles, like AK-47s and AR-15s (M-16s, that
is). Oh, but they don’t look exactly like them at all, now do they? For these BB
guns have a little orange tip on the end of the barrel, to indicate that they
are just BB guns, so nobody will think they are real assault rifles, and so
nobody will meet the bearers of these mock firearms with deadly force. So that
clears that issue up!

And I don’t wish to give anyone any ideas or anything, but,
um, couldn’t people with real assault rifles simply paint an orange tip onto
the real thing so people will think the guns are simply BB guns until they
actually start shooting? And couldn’t someone simply snap the orange tip off
the BB gun (or paint it black) and then go rob a bank with a BB gun? So this
whole making-BB-guns-that-look-exactly-like-assault-rifles thing seems just a
tad irresponsible to me. But I’m just a lame square, so what do I know?

It’s funny, because in this current world we find ourselves
living, I believe it’s now illegal to make toy guns that look like real guns (I
think to prevent tragic cases of shooting kids who appear to be brandishing
real weapons when they’re only toys). But they’re still allowed to make BB guns
that look just like real life assault rifles, like the same kinds terrorists
and militias use? I’m sorry, but that seems kind of inadvisable to me,
especially when they are being sold in an urban environment like Los Angeles. I
don’t mean to deprive anyone of the fun of being shot by the police when
someone calls 911 because they see you carrying one of these mock weapons, but
for those who don’t want to panic everyone and get the SWAT team called on
them, I’d think it would be sort of, you know, kind of like, um, not such a
good idea to buy/sell/make, etc., BB guns like that. But I guess I’m just a
buzzkill who always wants to rain on everyone’s parade, so don’t listen to me.

Oh, look: I see I’m not the first to think of this painting
an orange tip on a real gun thing: