Remember Wonkavision? The notion of sending a chocolate bar via TV signal so you can grab it right out of your set and eat it?

The Japanese have finally come up with something similar. Except that, being a uniquely Japanese version, it's weirder and more terrible than anything made by Oompa Loompas. You attach the small scent box to your smart phone, select one of three food options, and it blasts their scent in your face. But this is no mere scratch and sniff - the idea is to eat a bowl of bland white rice while the scent lasts, and thereby fool your body into thinking there's meat on top of it.

We had something like this in college - it's called Top Shelf Ramen! Requires no phone, and it was never marketed this well. The hilarious English-language commercial (after the jump) pitches this as a diet aid for women and a dream come true for broke-ass men, before recommending its use on a date (for a couple who've been together a mere 2 weeks), proclaiming "We're pretty sure this will help bring them closer!"

Question: After two weeks, your date brings you home to an empty apartment to eat plain white rice while sniffing his phone. Is that a good recipe for intimacy? Would any reasonable human being think it was?

No, no; my stomach would not be fooled it would be screaming 'BULL PLOP! Where's the protein? At least have some beans!'

"The Big Bang in Yakiniku..." Bwhahahahahahah!

Now that I'm thinking about it you just know this technology is already be alter to emit decidedly more perverted smells; less from a year from now there will be eroges and or cheesecake fan-service anime's that have collectors editions that come with a version (or rip-off) of this that emits the main female's 'particular scent'.