Best friend revealed horrible secret.. ***trigger!***

So I have been friends with my best friend for several years. Yesterday after my baby shower, my friend sat me down and told me some upsetting news. In december, she had told me she believed she was pregnant. A week later, she told me she wasnt. Yesterday, she revealed to me she had an abortion. I really have no clue how to react or what to say to this. It makes me feel helpless, for a life that never had a chance. I have felt down about it all day. I have no clue how to talk or what to say to her now. Anyone ever dealt with something like this? I dont know what to do. I am so angry and upset at her, I feel like I could of talked to her and prevented it.

Comments (61)

It's her choice. She didn't need to be talked out of it. She's an adult, making her own decisions and living with them. She obviously told you because she trusts you, don't ruin a friendship by getting on a high horse or judging her.

I agree. While I personally am not for abortion, it was her decision. You are obviously very good friends, so why be upset with her? This country has the freedom of choice, and she made hers, just as you made yours...

There is no reason to make her feel guilty about it, or to be angry at her. It was not your decision to make, and she did what she felt was best for her. I know that it is hard to believe that not everyone feels the same about the issue... but she did what she felt she needed to.

Maybe the reason she didn't tell you is because she knew that you would try to talk her out of it, and then be angry when she went through with it?

Being her friend you should support her decision. Making her feel like she did the "wrong" thing isn't what she needs to hear. Just because you might not agree with abortion doesn't make it wrong. Some people just aren't ready to be parents- I think it's a mature responsible decision. Again might not be for everyone but support is the best thing you can do!

I have to agree with pp. Respect that she thinks enough of your friendship that she confided this in you & support her the best you can. She has to live with the decision she made and even if it was the absolute right decision for her, it's not going to be an easy one. Talking her out of it would not have made her any more ready to be a mother than she'd decided she was. Sometimes the best of friends don't agree with your decisions, but support you either way. It's taken me a long time to realize this.

I agree, it is her choice and you may not believe in what she did, she may still need support from her best friend. Everyone may not be ready to have a child and some people do make mistakes and get pregnant.

Everyone that gets an abortion has their own reason behind it and you as her best friend should be the 1 she feels comfortable telling and you should accept it ! It took her that much to tell you n for you to be "upset" is selfish. She is looking for support, not judgement. I dont want to be rude but its true. Be a real "best friend" and help her through it and try to understand her point of view.

I think it's hard for vey pregnant women to imagine doing because of all the love we feel right now but could you imagine being as pregnant as we are wishing we had opted for abortion? I cry when Someone miscarries in watch a movie I'm watching...

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