Genie's Lamp

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie's lamp.

She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she can get three wishes.

The Genie said: "Nope. Due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wages in third-world countries and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish ... so what'll it be?"

The woman didn't hesitate and said: "I want peace in the Middle-East. See the map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other."

The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed: "Oh God! Lady! These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm good, but not THAT good! It's impossible - make another wish!"

The woman thought for a minute and said: "Well, I've never been able to find the right man. You know, one that's considerate and fun, likes to cook, and helps with the housecleaning, good in bed and gets along with my family, doesn't watch sports all the time. And he's faithful. That's what I wish for: a good mate."

The Genie let out a long sigh and said: "Let me see that fuckin' map again..."