Stockwell Toilet Watch

Sunday, 17 May 2009

STOCKWELL GASWATCH - WOT A FEMININE GAS! I THINK NOT.

Nine Elms Market this morning. Younger than me the stallholder was in his mid fifties. £2 change due - "here you are" says he amicably enough "four fifty pence pieces you can shove them in your gas meter!!". Says I: "those days are long over" and we both momentarily thought back and agreed how things have moved on.

The moment had at last come so I added another anecdote: "You know those handbags very fashionable and trendy now with women with reinforcement patches, and heaps of buckles and double stitching?" I had in mind bags like the above and of course heaps of similarish others. He was listening . . . "When I was a kid" I continued "the gas man used to come from time to time to repair the gas stove and he alone memorably carried a reinforced heavy-duty bag like women are dropping like flies for nowadays - obviously the old gas bags weren't so gaudy and brassy"."Yeah your right!" he said "now you say it the gasman DID have a bag like you describe". We kinda smirked a laughing matter it isn't.

These current "women's gasbags" are not "far out" not way out not a "gas" they are banal. The Gasman re-cometh. "GET THE LOOK"eh? Save us!

NOD NOD WINK WINK "BETTER TRY SOMEWHERE ELSE" LAMBETH POLICE ADVICE!

SO YOU BETTER SWAN STOCKWELL OFF. PLENTY OF OTHER AREAS WHERE THERE ARE NO "WE ARE ACTIVELY PATROLLING" SIGNS NOD NOD WINK WINK.

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"YES YES CLEVER CLOGS SO YOU THOUGHT ALL AREAS WERE ACTIVELY PATROLLED - DON'T GIVE NO LIP OR YOU'LL BE "NEIGHBOURHOOD POLICING NICKED" BEFORE YOU CAN SAY "TSG NO I.D. G20". DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR? NOW MOVE ALONG".

Saturday, 9 May 2009

SOCIAL SERVICES HUNT FOR MISSING STOCKWELL LABOUR PARTY BLOGGER

Tipped off that a STOCKWELL LABOUR PARTY BLOGGER has disappeared and has still left no word on his BLOG that he is safe and well and that he has gone into hiding "of his own choice" LAMBETH SOCIAL SERVICES have been alerted to his disappearence.---------------Alarmingly "comments" and queries raised on his <STANDUPFORSTOCKWELL> blog relating to massive (tho' underpublicised) COUNCIL funding for the local PORTUGUESE COMMUNITY have gone unanswered. The worry is that BLOGGER BIGHAM has somehow been overcome and may be lying foresaken in the STOCKWELL scrublands. Altho foul play is not suspected in the absence of any proper local public toilet facility he could have climbed up on a local rooftop to relieve himself and fell into a crevice. Should any local resident sense a whiff of something seemingly "not quite right" (there would be a almighty stench) they are advised to notify SOCIAL SERVICES asap. Let the forlorn cry go out - BLOGGER BIGHAM WHERE ARE YOU? ----------A similar fate seems also to have fallen boastfully "well brought up, well educated wine loving"Larkhall Councillor Peter Robbins - he too has gone to ground, his <sad eyed blog> also lies neglected and thus it is that posted "comments" are left neglected in limbo pending his return. The Lambeth Community Police Consultative Group "Minutes" after eight months neglect have now been brought up to date but alas they also offer no information as to Councillor Robbins whereabouts - which is a great shame because he is a staunch supporter of their LCPCG meanderings. Boy the LCPCG can truly "meander".------------There is a vague possiblity that during a training exercise for no good reason he has been dragged kicking and screaming into the (in the news) LARKHALL LANE POLICE TERRITORIAL SUPPORT GROUP base by a TSG hero who is as yet unidentifiable - we await further developments on this one which still has to be referred to the Independent Police Complaints Commission. ------------One could endeavour to contact local Labour Councillors AKHTAR, BOWYER or WALKER but they too have been missing for yonks.-----------Of course there must be the possibility that both Bigham and Robbins are still doing the London Marathon and will be back with us by mid May.

Friday, 8 May 2009

Folk in Pakistan, Irak and Afghanistan must be absolutely gutted about this altho' Central Stockwell's non-existant public toilets were not involved but apparently Gordon Brown's brother was involved! Who was the lucky cleaner? Was it a Tory-voting moonlighting Banker? Was it one of Max wots 'is name part time sado masochistic ladies of the flesh? Was it the other Max with team member Jade Goody? Was it George Galloway? Was it Dr David Kelly? Or maybe May Hobbs. Somewhat disgraced Lee Jasper? Did the cleaner pay taxes on the windfall? Wot an astonishing monies come rolling in scam! £52 week after week on and on for over 2 years. That kind of affluence must leave tell tale traces. This must be such a truly heart breaking period for Daily Telegraph journo's! Kilroy's Bog Roll heart goes out to them. On the other hand it must be another very good day to bury New Labour's Irak and Afghanistan war crimes. I just hope the money grabbing cleaner wasn't Hazel Blears - no impossible. Will the cleaner break cover - trying to sell the film rights already I suppose.

"COMPASSION IN WORLD FARMING" stalwart Joanna "Chumley" Lumley ("chumley" is simply a poetic addition courtesy of a bowl of Wheetabix just eaten) isn't Prime Minister yet. However the chances of her being so are now far greater than those of poor old Bob Carlos Clarke. Should she gain the premeirship there'll be no "SKIN TWO" era type foto's of her and Hazel Blears hugging the Downing Street doorposts. Oh no.

All power to STOCKWELL's Lumley Chumley re her Campaign for the Gurkhas. And indeed also for her work reCOMPASSION IN WORLD FARMING. However before the mystery writer of the Royal "Thumbs Up for Gurkhas" letter (reported to be Princess Diana's ex-husband's current other half) gets carried aloft and praised to the heavens maybe the letter could have gone very much further. Whom so ever the Royal writer was could have also put a word in for a more total CAMILLA and Co., pro-animal change of heart.

It could have informed animal compassionate "Chumley Lumley" that the Royal cabal had at long last suffered a very very significant change of heart. That they were no longer going to take unceasing amusement and pleasure in shooting and slaughtering animals including pheasants of course and in Camilla's husband's case (as above) sometimes in their hundreds.

Chumley Lumley, who deserves genuine credit for her Gurkha and CIF campaigning, has a reputation among some well informed pro animal activists as having sat back as it were on the fence re animal hunting. So, whatever the increasingly publicised Royal missive said re Gurkhas it could have done a great deal better. So to an argueable degree pro animal Chumley Lumley was "short changed".

Sunday, 3 May 2009

A communication about the above LAMBETH PORTUGUESE COMMUNITY "LANGUAGE" AND "COUNCIL FUNDING" CONUNDRUM has been sent to KATE HOEY M.P.-----------The problem appears to be that LAMBETH COUNCIL LEADER (so-called) STEVE REED gave an early April PORTUGUESE television interview (in English) in which he announced that half a million pounds was going to be made available to the LAMBETH PORTUGUESE COMMUNITY by the Council - the interview is no longer available for scrutiny in the English language. Of course details of this LAMBETH COUNCIL announcement ought to be made available to all LAMBETH residents not solely those who have Portuguese connections. The pronouncements (which also included an English contribution from STOCKWELL WARD COUNCILOR and MIDDLESBORO football supporter PETE BOWYER) may still be available now but ONLY in the Portuguese language. Local Stockwell Labour Party > blog <> and its undated recommended > links < DO NOT actually provide the supportive funding decision financial data and SWT has sought feedback clarification/ assistance from the Labour Party blogger. STEVE REED claims that LABOUR has always supported the Portuguese Community whereas the Lib Dems have not. However so far as LABOUR are concerned STW had had very clear information relatively recently from the Portuguese community that Labour support was abysmal and greatly disapointing.-------------The hope is that KATE HOEY will be able to help to obtain clarification in ENGLISH of the above pronouncements. So far it would seem that no announcements re the above have been made in "LAMBETH Life" the Council's APRIL 1st, 15th or May 1st fortnightly propaganda newspapers (Kilroy is being polite). You can discover therein lots about COUNCIL anti squatter operations and repeatedly about how many yearly pintas of plastic milk equals one year's supply of LAMBETH Life - all very edifying. Of course if we had only half the numbers of LAMBETH Life the yearly the milk bill would be less, and the LL money could be better used. And stomach churning boring propaganda would also be greatly reduced.---------To those who might accuse STOCKWELL TOILET WATCH (STW) of bias in this PORTUGUESE COMMUNITY FUNDING matter let me assure such critics (and there must be many) the above televised LAMBETH COUNCIL FUNDING PRONOUNCEMENTS did NOT include any indicatation that any of the funding was for PUBLIC TOILET PROVISION or ENHANCEMENT - as if it would!! So bias doesn't in any way figure.

Friday, 1 May 2009

The London-wideBorough'COMMUNITY POLICE CONSULTATIVE GROUPS were established in the 'Eighties to achieve "police accountability" given that hitherto it had always been sorely lacking. Alas they have not proved especially successful. The LAMBETH GROUP hasn't broken the mould either tho' at times it has boasted otherwise. .-----------Over the past couple or three years or so the website of the LAMBETH GROUP which boasts that "MINUTES" of its MONTHLY MEETINGS are to be posted for public scrutiny has instead repeatedly demonstrated the very opposite, namely that they are extremely conspicuous by their "caught-short" absence - and not just for brief periods, but for months and months on end.----------Witness the current situation > here < - there have been NO monthly Group "Minutes" whatever posted since July 2008. Maybe the "Minutes" - indeed maybe also the Group itself - have been "KETTLED" if not in quite G20 style.Indeed the cop on video shown as having in such a cowardly way to have savaged Ian Tomlinson before he died was actually deployed from STOCKWELL's Union Road "Territorial Support Group" base. All the more reason for ongoing and full GROUP scrutiny and accountability.--------------The "WE LOVE LARKHALL" local Labour Party blog unfavourably highlighted in the immediately previous STOCKWELL TOILET WATCH post has also very recently called upon local folk to attend LAMBETH POLICE CONSULTATIVE GROUP meetings. STW acknowledges that it is a bit much to expect local Ward Councillors (also including the 3 centralStockwell Ward Councillor "musketeers") to suss out that for months and months and months on endGROUP "Minutes" are NOT getting posted on to their CONSULTATIVE GROUP website. Heaven forbid, for if they were to notice that omission they might even notice that central STOCKWELL has NO PUBLIC TOILETS and SORELY NEEDS them too.-----------No, as sadly blogged by STW all too frequently Musketeer Pete Bowyer's favourite football team - MIDDLESBORO - the centre of his life on earth - are forever "playing away". ----------------------POST SCRIPT @ MAY 5TH.This LCPCG "COMMENT" has now been forthcoming:CPCG said... "Thanks for pointing that out. There was an internal link problem on the site. You can find everything you want now. CPCG"05 May 2009 09:13---- STW comment - hmmmm... must be a recurring "linkage problem". Over the past year or so there have been repeated missing / unavailable "MINUTES".

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After further covert investigation by SYNEY RUBBER HEELS & ASSOCIATES (Lee Jasper no relation) it seems not unlikely that this troublesome internal "link" that may not have actually existed was "kettled" extremely violently from behind by a Stockwell TSG officer who had also carefully forgotten to "link" his behaviour to his I.D.

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Roll on Christmas! We'll see if any further "MINUTES" get TSG "kettled".

About Me

See post < sCRAPBOOK STOCKWELL > text. I'm a Stockwell (London) pensioner, with diabetes type 2, have had radiotherapy treatment for cancer of the prostate, and am in regular need of public conveniences - for initial STOCKWELL TOILET WATCH purposes what else do you need to know?