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As the fates would have it, the big "October Surprise" of the 2012 presidential campaign turned out to be a natural disaster rather than the usual man-made mess.

Much like the race for the White House, Superstorm Sandy largely bypassed Northeast Pennsylvania, hammering New York, New Jersey and West Virginia and leaving downed trees and power lines everywhere else it roamed.

All the meteorologists say this was a one-of-a-kind storm. OK, but I'd say what's truly remarkable is that while Sandy struck one of the most densely populated parts of the country, the death toll stood at 105 on Saturday.

We can thank God for that, but also government.

Yep. Government.

With assists from incompetent and corrupt politicians, scribblers seeking easy targets and citizens who want today's services at yesterday's prices, the "Privatize Everything" crowd has done a masterful job convincing us that government is inherently evil and incapable of getting anything right.

For every Pennsylvania Legislature, however, there are many official entities that get it right more often than not. There's nothing like a hurricane that threatens 60 million people to remind us that there are some functions only government can perform.

In emergencies, government is the apparatus by which society survives. It is how resources are targeted and deployed, how lives are saved, how the pieces are put back together and how the bills are paid.

New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie spent Tuesday profusely thanking President Barack Hussein Obama for his hands-on handling of the disaster. Ironically, his most effusive praise of the president came on the Fox "News" morning show "Fox and Friends," which is like "Romper Room" for adults who as children ate their weight in lead paint chips.

Co-host Steve Doocy asked if Mitt Romney would be invited to tour the results of Sandy's wrath in the Garden State.

"I have no idea, nor am I the least bit concerned or interested," Mr. Christie replied. "I've got a job to do here in New Jersey that's much bigger than presidential politics, and I (couldn't) care less about any of that stuff."

About the federal response to the storm, Mr. Christie said:

"I spoke to the president three times yesterday. He called me for the last time at midnight last night asking what he could do. I said, if you can expedite designating New Jersey as a major disaster area, that would help us to get federal money and resources in here as quickly as possible to help clean up the damage here. ...

"At 2 a.m., I got a call from FEMA to answer a couple of final questions and then he signed the declaration this morning. ... He's been very attentive, and anything that I've asked for, he's gotten to me. So, I thank the president publicly for that. He's done - as far as I'm concerned - a great job for New Jersey."

The Fox Friends stared blankly into the camera. A Republican governor had just gushed like a giddy schoolgirl in praise of the most demonized Democrat since FDR. He may as well have said that despite his many faults, Hitler had a beautiful singing voice.

The Fox Friends can't be blamed for failing to see it coming. Mr. Christie has spent much of the past year standing up for Mitt Romney and calling Mr. Obama a "liar who must be defeated." Funny how being in desperate need of a small army of professionals trained in the complex arts of disaster management can change your perspective.

That's the real lesson of Sandy. When the storm surge swells on the horizon, we don't turn to private industry and phantom "job creators" for help. Instead, we look to the government to perform its most basic task - protecting the health and welfare of the people it was created to serve.

Mr. Romney praised FEMA's response to Sandy, but during the Republican primary season, he said a "severely conservative" President Romney would downsize the agency and privatize many of its functions.

Naturally, Mr. Romney sidestepped questions this week about his plans for FEMA, but a Tuesday campaign event in Ohio offered some clues. Supporters were asked to bring canned goods and other non-perishable items to be donated to the American Red Cross for storm victims. Sounds great, except the Red Cross discourages such donations, which tie up resources and pose huge logistical challenges. If you want to help, cash is the way to go.

The last thing the Romney campaign wanted was photos of its candidate grinning amid stacks of money. The desired image was Mr. Romney heroically collecting batteries, bottled water and Hamburger Helper. To make sure they got it, campaign aides went to Wal-Mart and bought $5,000 worth of groceries.

Supporters who wanted to meet Mr. Romney were required to hand him an item. Those who came empty-handed were invited to take a "donation" from the pile the campaign purchased. Mr. Romney - who also wrote the Red Cross a check for an undisclosed amount - said the donated supplies would be loaded onto trucks and sent to "I think it's New Jersey."

Another swing and a miss, but I guess it's the thought that counts.

CHRIS KELLY, the Times-Tribune columnist, has a beautiful singing voice.

Contact the writer: kellysworld@timesshamrock.com, cjkink on Twitter.

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