Clarity is a rare luxury in my life. My very own mind betrays me,it sends me self-destructive information,and I often get lost by the ruins of my actions.This blog helps me remember who I am and the dangers that lurk inside of me. I thank you for your readership.Your presence here makes me feel less alone.I now live my life imitating the words of Tom Hanks in Castaway-“I know what I have to do.I have to keep breathing. And tomorrow the sun will rise, who knows what the tide will bring in.”

Sunday, August 13, 2017

Since my return from Penang, I have received some comments that I look much better (in positive spirits) compared to the last time they saw me.
A close friend, a TCM physician, and a GP.
These are people who had been seeing me on off basis for years.
Their discerning observation carries substantial weight.

Happiness isn't something that stays with me.
And believe me, my requirements to consider myself happy, are very low.
Employed, no dark monsters , not wanting to die, sleep and eat reasonably well, and sufficient social contact are my checklist for happiness.

Thank you for reading my blog. I have mental illness. There are some posts here which were written back when I was manic (2006-2008). Rereading them still gives me the jitters. I have not been manic since but had many lapses of depression. If you read carefully, you can detect the different personality in my posts. My brain doesn't function well due to my illness, the meds, and ECT.

Writing here helps me remember who I am and the monster I'm cursed with. Again. Thank you for reading.