President Obama signed $2.4 billion of new debt ceiling sausage into law. The Beaver’s evil twin, Missouri Democrat, Emanuel Clever, called the deal a satan sandwich. The stock market took one bite and retched up its remaining green gains for 2011.

David Wu is being forced out of Congress for improper tiger attire. However, the Oregonian is taking a page from the Ohio State Buckeyes and staying on through the Debt Ceiling Sugar Bowl. The question nobody is asking is will the NCAA subsequently vacate any congressional wins where Wu votes.