Poor James Wakefield just wanted to reawaken his ex-girlfriend's affections after she dumped him last December. And he figured the best way to do it would be to pay his friend James Rawson £20,000 to don a Dalek mask with voice-changer, kidnap his ex, and take her out to the woods. After the Dalek-masked Rawson had terrified her, Wakefield planned to show up and impress his ex with a miraculous "rescue." Surely being saved from a Dalek would make any right-thinking woman fall madly in love with this spurned bloke again, right? Luckily, Wakefield never got to find out: He and Rawson were arrested last week for conspiracy to kidnap. According to the Telegraph:

Rawson, 21, claimed he thought Wakefield was joking until he turned up with the £40 helmet he had bought at Woolworths, along with night vision goggles, handcuffs, an air pistol, a balaclava, a boiler suit and a knife block . . . The court was told that Rawson was meant to go to the woman's home in Newark, Nottinghamshire, hold the knife to her throat, then bundle her into the boot of a car and take her to the woods. But after waiting outside her home twice, Rawson abandoned the plan. On the first occasion, he ran away after he was "spooked" by a cat. The second time he ran off after being caught in the glare of an approaching car's headlights, the court heard.

Scared off by a cat? I thought the only thing that could deter a Dalek was absorbing a snippet of Rose Tyler's DNA, or maybe being sent into the Void. Let this be a lesson to all would-be ex-girlfriend kidnappers, though. A Dalek mask can't make you awesome, even if you wear night vision goggles underneath it. Dalek Voice-Changer at the Center of Kidnap Plot [via UK Telegraph]