Category: Roundups

To celebrate the 50th anniversary of Star Trek, we’ve rounded up some of our best Trek themed Not Always Working stories! The selection below proves that sometimes you have to go all the way to the Gamma Quadrant to find decent customer service!

(We just hired on a bunch of new people. The kid I am training has never had a job before and is a bit nervous, so we chat a little.)

Coworker: “You do everything so fast! But, I guess you’ve been doing it for a while.”

Me: “Yes, long enough that the managers are comfortable with me training new people.”

Coworker: “So why don’t you have a red shirt like the other crew trainers?”

Me: “Oh, there was a little part of my certification that I didn’t complete in time so I was not officially promoted to a crew trainer. However, I still make the same amount as them and I still train people. The only difference is the red shirt.”

(I have been summoned for jury duty and am going through the courthouse security checkpoint. As requested, I empty my pockets of all metallic objects, including my keys, before passing through the walk-through metal detector. When the guard sees my keychain he does a double take with a quizzical look on his face.)

Me: “Oh, that strange-looking item is my keychain. It’s just a small electronic toy that resembles one of those communicators from the original Star Trek series. I’m not sure if you’ve ever watched it, but I assure you, this keychain is definitely not harmful.”

(Anxious to prove that the keychain wasn’t in fact a concealed weapon of some sort, I demonstrated to the guard that it just flipped open and made chirping noises that sounded just like the communicators from the show. As the guard observed this, his expression became overly serious, which worried me.)

Guard: “Here. I need to examine it more closely.”

(He motions for me to hand it over to him. After I comply, he flips it open and holds it up as though he is about to speak through it.)

Guard: “This is Captain James T. Kirk. Beam me up, Scotty!”

(Needless to say, I had worried for nothing! Furthermore, this put a big grin on my face and brightened up what was otherwise a long, dreary day in the jury room.)