Thursday, March 4, 2010

I can sleep when I'm dead...or during that "really important" conference call.

"Chels, this is what you asked for....be grateful."

I sprawled myself out on the couch and whined like a little bitch about being "too busy" while I kicked my little black boots in the air and shook my dangled earrings in childlike fury. I didn't want to look at the 7,000 emails that were piled up and the cell phone that I didn't have for three weeks (thanks to a little spilt milk in the tracking ball) wasn't missed either. I didn't want another text, or a phone call- I didn't want to feel the pressure, of "immediate response" when your Blackberry starts buzzing and people are on the other end waiting on your answer. I didn't want another social obligation, or event that needed to be "fit in..."

...all I wanted to do was lay down, on my cozy couch- and breathe. Maybe fall in and out of naps while watching reruns of Property Virgins and drinking orange juice from the carton.

I was feeling the strain of needing to be a "yes" person all the time, so much so that I was HOPING for a cold, or the stomach flu, or a funeral- yeah, (I'm morbid and horrible, I know)- so I wouldn't have to come up with an excuse as to why I couldn't "make it", or why an assignment was late, or why I didn't have enough energy to squeeze in a rehearsal....my stock phrases were; I'm stressed, I'm overwhelmed, I'm too busy...and fuck, I'm gonna die. Using certain phrases consistently, over a period of time- no matter what it is, will eventually make that belief TRUE.

All the things I was saying about my circumstances could easily be turned into a positive phrase, if I changed my perspective.

My Love said, "You asked for ABUNDANCE....and that is what you're getting." I could look at everything as "overwhelming" or I could simply start saying "thank you."I could get off the couch, check the emails, head out the door with a fucking smile on my face or I could sit there and loathe an event that hasn't even occurred yet, which is useless. Receiving my abundance with gratitude makes it so much easier to get through the moments where you feel like there's "too much" and that "too much" is so much better defined as living a FULL life. Even though it's hard to do...shouldn't that be the goal?

Sure, there's gonna be times when we need to reevaluate, say "no" when we're bending before we break, or our priorities aren't lining up with the end goals....or, we simply don't want to sit through another pointless fucking phone call, lunch date or distant-cousins-softball match. But the for most part, BUSY IS GOOD. BUSY MEANS YOU'RE IN DEMAND.

... I started thinking about my life, my priorities, and all those times when I felt like everything was stagnant- when I was living in the stark reality of waiting for life to happen to me, rather than being a conscious creator in life happening because I'm engaged in it and dictating its direction. I think when there wasn't enough work, or creativity- when I felt like I was scraping from the bottom of an empty well....and now, that well is overflowing, I'm complaining that the water is running my shoes. Or something like that.

Fuck the shoes, and the flood....we want a flood! We want to fill FULFILLED and overwhelmed and FULL...and more is better than nothing at all. Bring on the rain and all that soppy goodness.

Right now is when we should be worn out, we should be packed and crowded- active and present. Reminding ourselves that everyday, we spend bemoaning ourselves, our lovers, our home or our circumstances we're wasting vital time where we could A. change it, or B. be grateful, for everything is fleeting, good and bad.

Saying "I'm stressed" just reinforces that into a reality.... so instead I'll be; engulfed, overcome, submerged in prosperity. AHHH, that feels so much better.

Great post :)I was getting overwhelmed a couple of weeks ago. I felt so down and out. My house became a mess. I didn't have my priorities straight. I whined a lot. However, when I decided to shut up and get on with it, life really did feel a whole lot better :)

This rings as true right now as it did 12 hours ago when we discussed this. I love how you say you're "receiving your abundance with gratitude," and I feel like I'm doing the same thing. My world is overflowing with greatness right now and I want to FEEL and experience ALL OF IT. Because hell - I asked for it!

Overwhelmed!!!We must be in sync, last week was full of everything including an emotional roaller coaster about my photography work..Big f***** story about publishing some of my images..and how the censored some stuff that is just as innocent as a baby..I guess, shouldn't complain because the ripple effect is making me a little bit more known tan before..Cheers to abundance, and all the stuff that brings with it!!!!

Chels! You are the best motivation i get here- i am SO in love with your blog!

When i'm overwhelmed, i shut off my cell-phone, pull the plug to the land-line off, throw my feet up in the air, eat, watch a film, sleep- privacy is sacred. When i'm feeling "Oh so lovely" in something like a week, i feign ignorance- no excuses whatsoever- "blame the phone company, i have no freaking clue what you're talking about!!"

So glad you commented on my Lucite love... now I gots to say me loves you! So my thoughts... well, have to watch what you wish for, busy is good but can make you throw up in your throat a little at times. (what I call "go away nausea")As a single mum to 5 boys, 3 lovely canine daughters, and a house being renovated, being fabulous keeps me going. I'll be checking back! xo Erica

This happens to me all the time:getting stressed and overwhelmed. Sometimes, I get to the point where I just can't take it anymore. But you make a good point about how when we're busy, it means we're in demand. When we're busy, we are living each day to the fullest, and now is the prime time to be doing that.

This post was the most perfect thing I could've read. For the past three years I've been spread so thin, doing more than I've ever done for myself, my family, my job, pretty much everything and everyone. At first it was fun, I was playing "grown-up" and was BUSY, which was awesome compared to young, broke, unemployed, bored and anxious about my future. Lately, though, I've been feeling burnt out and complaining and stressed and fried...but you're so right - I should be channeling that into OVERCOME and IN DEMAND! Above all, especially with the current state of the world (and seemingly everyone I talk to), I should be feeling blessed and grateful. At least I have these opportunities and I'm young, healthy and energetic enough to (try to) balance it all.

I love this post because it happens to everyone. We all get overwhelmed. Usually, when I have too much on my plate, I just shut down and don't feel like doing anything but laying around and watching tv/reading/etc. It's true, though, that it's all in your perspective!

Omg, YES. What a great post!! I go through this too... when I have nothing to do, I whine and complain about it, but when I'm overflowing with to-do's, I whine and complain... but lately I've been trying to remember to be grateful for the busy-ness, because idle boredom is much, much worse...xoxo J

I can totally relate to feeling overwhelmed! To me, it's all about a bubble bath. Though even then I still sometimes feel lousy... Hope life settles down --- love your writing, you've such talent! XOXO

I cry. But I'm really trying right now to learn to live in the now, and not worry about the future but just take it one day, one hour at a time. Just take it all in a little at a time trying not to let your mind worry about the future and you'll feel much better. I'm reading The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle and if I can make any sense out of all the confusing shit in that book that will be it.

I'm totally jealous! I want to be overwhelmed, overworked, over...EVERYTHING! I want my well to be overflowing! I want it all, all, all. OK, I'm not in a Warren G video. Sigh. Yes, be thankful for your blessings.

I don't think I've ever left a message telling you how much I enjoy your posts! Because I really do!

And when I get overwhelmed...my energy just rises up to meet it (and if that doesn't work, caffeine sure does) I normally get so excited that things are working out that I don't let myself feel anything else...

If there weren't times when I felt overwhelmed by life... christ I would be bored. So when I am, I just try to suck it up and let it run through me until it bubbles, rises and then spills out onto the page. Yes, often I write best when feeling overwhelmed. And to be bored would just not be living... oh, and I bake 'gooey chocolate stack' and watch crappy property programmes ;-)

Thanks for stopping by my blog and for your sweet comment; I think I'm going to love it here...

great post! I loved it! At the moment all i want is sitting at the couch by night, cozy with some series or movies but then I miss going out to any events, so I probably need to kick my ass to get stressed in my personal life too haha! - and thank you for your comment on my blog!

Just like everyone else, I am feeling majorly overwhelmed myself. Usually, I just whine and cry and beg my hubby to do something for me - he usually shuts me up with a bottle of wine. But I needed this BIG TIME. So thanks lady!

For some reason I love the feeling of being busy but ONLY when I'm doing it all, if I'm being lazy and not wanting to do anything then I"M SO STRESSED!So...it's hard...Get some Vitamin D, it helps with stress...seriously...new discovery of mine :)Good luck, I hope you have some time to relax!Love that pic btw

It frustrates me when people around me hear their phone ring and leap up looking for it like the person on the other end of the line will expire if they don't answer. I understand needing to answer the phone if its work but can't a friend wait a little while if you've already committed to hanging out with someone else? Sorry, just had to have a little phone rant there. ;)

I kind of shut down when things are over whelming. I know there's a ton of stuff that I need/should do, yet, it takes a very large amount of motivation to get those things done. It annoys me, but that's how I'm wired I guess.

I can completely relate. There has been many times where I wished that my obligations could just be brushed aside, maybe an "I'm sick" meant that you could forget anything that happens when you are sick, and you can truly have a break, and not spend time after your sick catching up! I play loud happy music, drink lots of coffee and get through it. :)

That's so true! I find myself complaining about all the work projects I'm juggling, but have to put myself in check because I would much rather have TOO MUCH to do, than NOTHING to do (and not have a job). Why are we so quick to start viewing a blessing as an annoyance?!

Can't say I have any great wisdom on how to handle feelings of being overwhelmed. I tend to bottle it up inside and then it comes pouring out all at once in crazy tears upon breaking a nail one day.

I tend to ignore the overwhelming hordes, deny that I'm taking on too much, say "Yeah, sure!" to even more, have a panic attack, find out I've not been having panic attacks, but have an irregular heart beat, end up in the hospital getting cold gooey goodness smeared on my chest for an echo cardiogram and listening to a doctor tell me that I'm "wound pretty tight". That's been my week. Oy. I feel ya.

Hmmm. I like to say that I mediate and do yoga but FUCK when I'm overwhelmed I freak the fuck out for a good 2-4.5 minutes and then I figure it out. I thrive on being busy. I usually feel more overwhelmed when I'm only a little busy or not busy at all. I know, it doesn't make sense, I'm just an bass-akwards kinda person.

I've had the opposite problem lately: I'm so used to being busy that as soon as I had some free time I felt guilty and tried to come up with something constructive to do. The grass really is greener everywhere else.

I really can relate to your post today. I have had many periods of my life feeling exactly how you do. Today I would kill to be overwhelmed, too busy, fulfilled. I would be in bliss if opportunities were knocking down my door and my phone was off the hook. Enjoy it girl. You are the creator.

I react like a crazy-ass bitch. I go into a caffeine-induced traumatic angry sexy state of being.When I'm overwhelmed...that's what my boyfriend loves the most..cause I'm like the a sex fiend overwhelmed and I take it out on him. But when I feel accomplished and overwhelmed...I usually react with a hot bath and a disney movie marathon...hahahahahah!

Loving this post... and the title of the post most of all! When I get overwhelmed, once I get done migraining, taking heavy tranquilizer level migraine medication, and chugging a diet coke and dunkin donuts breakfast sandwich and/or McDonald's chicken nugget happy meal to bring my mind back to functioning, I tend to just duck and cover --- I work through it without stopping to think about how stressed I am... because thinking about my stress level kicks the migraine cycle (see above) off again.

I react in the same way. I stomp my feet, hiss and cry when I am too busy. But putting it into perspective you realize that there is so much abundance and so many good things all around ya, it makes you look at things differently. Loved this post.

Well, I usually just make a list of everything that needs to get done, and then I do One Thing At A Time, and every time I finish a task, I cross it off my list. And before I know it I start to feel a sense of accomplishment and NOT overwhelmed.

Oh sister friend I hear ya. Just like you said, we complain when we have time and we complain when we are busy. I'm also working on that being grateful part. Thanks for reminding me to look at things in a different light. Love you for that :)