Kris Jenner secretly plunks down $10 million across the street from Kim

It’s no secret that enormously famous celebrity supernova Kim Kardashian and her momager mama Kris Jenner share a close relationship. For heaven’s sake, the reality star lived at her mom’s Hidden Hills house (off and on) until she was well into her mid-30s. Heck, she might even be living there now that her old house has been sold to billionaire wife Marina Acton.

We are also sure that y’all know that Ms. Kardashian and her hot-headed hubby Kanye West are still in the midst of renovating their “dream” residence. Records show they purchased the 4.5-acre Hidden Hills compound in two separate transactions in 2014 that totaled $22,675,000. Since then, the couple have spent millions of dollars to rip out all the landscaping, gut the interiors, and expand the main house to suit their extensive — ahem — needs. Rumors say it may be another six months before the property is finalized and safe for move-in.

Anyway, now that Kris Jenner’s five daughters are all set for life and livin’ large in mansions of their own (the cheapest of which cost $7,200,000), Ms. Jenner is an empty nester. And what do empty nesters do when their kids move on out? They downsize, of course! Or that’s what they do if they’re not a Kardashian. Yep, you read right. Grandma Jenner is moving, but she ain’t downsizing — she’s upsizing. Remember, y’all, Ms. Jenner used to drive a beat-up old Mazda back in the day. But now she rolls a Rolls (she’s got two of the $300k vehicles, actually) and she is determined to flaunt her success and her resultant big bucks.

Since early 2010 — when she and her ex Caitlyn (formerly Bruce) Jenner bought it for $4,000,000 — Ms. Jenner has resided in a 1998-build mock-Mediterranean mansion in Hidden Hills. The 8,860-square-foot house has 7 bedrooms, 9 bathrooms, and sits on a 1.38-acre lot that is thickly wooded and hedged for max privacy. As y’all should know, Ms. Jenner was awarded the house in her 2014 divorce and has thoroughly renovated it since her 2010 purchase. We’re sure the property’s value has dramatically increased during Ms. Jenner’s ownership — Yolanda would not be surprised in the least if the house is now worth $7 million, nearly double what she paid seven years ago.

Kris Jenner’s current Hidden Hills home

But we digress. Yolanda just happens to know that Ms. Jenner will soon pay $9,925,000 (nearly the full $10 million asking price) for a brand-new spec mansion with a fat 9,400-square-feet of living space that is located barely a half-mile from her current residence. And it could be coincidence, although Yolanda rather thinks not, but the house happens to be almost directly across the street from Kim & Kanye’s unfinished $30+ million mega-compound. It’s so close that y’all could walk there blindfolded.

The new 1.28-acre pad lies near the dead-end of Long Valley Road and features a sprawling two-story mansion done up in that “Modern Farmhouse” style that is so en vogue right now and painted in a chic grey. Situated privately behind a small thicket of weeping willows, the house has a substantial motorcourt plus a four-car garage to house Ms. Jenner’s small collection of luxury vehicles.

Upon entering through the glass front door, visitors are treated to gorgeous burled-walnut floors underfoot and views all the way through the home, to the pool/spa out yonder. The floating staircase and the two-story foyer with a vaulted skylight make Yolanda think we’re in some sort of luxury loft in downtown, or maybe that’s just the early mornin’ Four Roses talkin’.

Naturally, the kitchen verges on hedonistic with designer-done (whatever that means) wooden cabinets and high-end Wolf and Miele appliances. There’s a marble-topped center island and an attached breakfast area with seating for 8 overlooking the lush backyard.

One unusual feature of this property is that the master suite is conveniently located on the main floor rather than in the second story. Walnut floors and contemporary finishes run through the fireplace- and balcony-equipped master bedroom, the expansive closet (for Ms. Jenner’s Birkin collection!) and the bathroom, which boasts a glassy shower area that’s great for exhibitionists to flaunt their bodily goods, whether au naturale or surgically-enhanced.

There are five additional light-flooded bedroom suites, so Kimmy should have no problem finding one that suites her needs.

Other amenities of the deluxe abode include smart home system with alarms and security cameras, a full sound system, and a comprehensive lighting system that can be controlled from afar. Out back is a large grassy backyard with a zero edge pool, a party-sized 10+ person spa great for family get-togethers or maybe just Rob Kardashian, a BBQ center and firepit. The property is an easy jog to numerous hiking trails and the Ahmanson Ranch State Park, though somehow we can’t imagine Ms. Jenner trudging around on local trails and shimmying down untamed hills.

In addition to her $4 million and $10 million Hidden Hills mansions, Granny Jenner also owns three luxury condos — one in the Wilshire Corridor neighborhood area of LA, the other two in the as-yet-unfinished Avanti complex in Calabasas that she purchased for a total of nearly $5 million.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours, y’all. Don’t forget to eat, drink, be merry, and bathe in the purple rain. And be good.