Hondo lost with the Nationals yesterday afternoon but turned on the turbos last night, scoring big time with the Astros and Yanks to slash the deficit to 775 grotes. Today, Mr. Aitch will work the day shift with Harvey and the Metamucils in Miami as well as Masterson and the Native Americans — 20 units apiece.

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Cronuts reportedly are still all the rage in New York City. Hang in there, men. Sources say researchers are very close to finding a cure. … Anthony “A-Wad” Weiner’s toilet-tongued flack, Barbara Morgan, has apologized after lashing out at a former intern who had written derogatorily about the Weinie campaign. Morgan called her an assortment of obscene names, including “slutbag.” However, A-Wad is standing firmly by Morgan, explaining: Hey, there’s nothing wrong with slutbags.