“Jessica Jones” recap (1.07): Hey, I have a terrible idea

Previously on Jessica Jones: Shit went down. Kilgrave bought Jessica’s childhood house. Jeri kept the aborted fetal remains of Hope’s baby. Luke found out Jessica killed his wife. Like I was saying, shit went down.

At Jessica’s apartment, more shit is going down. Kilgrave is there being his normal, horrifying, creepy self. He’s also peeing in her toilet which… *shakes head* …no. There’s a knock on Carl, and it’s Creepy Guy Twin who has brought banana bread because he loves Jessica. The amount to which this will not end well is so, so large.

Meanwhile, Jessica is being thrown out of a bar directly into a pile of garbage because the symbolism about her self-esteem is incredibly subtle on this show. After giving a homeless man her free sub stamp card, she spots the real reason she is there. It’s Jeri’s doctor wife, Wendy. So she rises like a trash monster to tail Wendy. The amount that this will not end well is so, so large.

She follows her into the subway and confronts her on the platform, and off the platform. She demands Wendy sign the divorce—papersand by demand I mean dangles her over the tracks. It’s moments like these I’m particularly glad I don’t have superpowers. After a night of drunken decision making usually the most I have to regret are some embarrassing texts. For Jessica, it’s holding someone’s life in her hands, literally.

But then, whoops, she drops Wendy. See, this is why you should never threaten someone’s life while drunk off your ass. Jessica realizes her near-fatal error and jumps in to throw Wendy out of the way of the oncoming train. But then she stands there as it approaches, the light coming closer and closer. And, blam, it hits her. Show over. I told you shit gets dark.

Kidding, of course. But not about the dark stuff. She jumps out of its path at the very last second and leaves a bewildered Wendy on the opposite platform wondering if this whole legalizing same-sex marriage was such a good idea in the first place.

So now it’s Malcolm’s turn to pick a trashed Jessica up off the elevator floor. Tables turning and all that. She staggers in and plops onto her bed, but see, this is why you always check the whole bed before getting in. Because there, on the other half, is a very dead Creepy Guy Twin. Fine, I should probably stop calling him that on account of his grisly murder. Kilgrave made him slash his own throat. So, see, I wasn’t kidding about shit getting dark.