How To Politely Say, "You Suck" to a Retailer

It was Small Business Saturday and I was on a mission, I would venture out to holiday shop.

With this caveat: I refused to buy anything if the help didn't say anything to me. I was looking for a repeat Amanda experience.

The first shop I entered, the employee was behind the counter. Another employee entered the store and the first employee looked up to talk about lunch.

I walked around the store and she came out from behind the counter. I walked over to a table, picked up an item. The first employee came by me and had to weave around me holding the item. She proceeded on to the backroom where I overheard more talk about lunch. Not a word to me or the other people in the store.

The second had a stream of customers entering and leaving - without bags. I entered to discover a woven basket filled with colorful men's wool socks for $30 from Guatamala. In looking around I discovered the owner (?) employee (?) sitting down behind a bunch of merchandise. It looked like she had a fort of merch to protect her. Not a word, just glaring.

As I was walking up the street to the next retailer a woman called me over. "Look at this," she said. "This guy is laying on the couch. Guess he doesn't want to sell anything." I looked in.

Sure enough, a guy laying on his stomach on an orange sofa. By now the woman had a couple join us too. The couch guy waved at us like he thought we thought it was funny.

The next store was a new one, nearly 10,000 sq. foot home store. I entered to find the owner and an employee behind the counter talking. I walked around, a couple left and the owner disappeared upstairs. I picked up a couple objects along the way but remembered my mantra: no purchase if they are silent. The woman remained behind the counter occasionally glancing up.

As I left through the front doors, the woman at the counter, who was now checking something online called after me, "Good-bye."

That was it...

I turned around and said, "It's interesting that you could say good-bye to me, yet never say a word to me while I was in your store for nearly ten minutes. I guess business is good." I headed back out the door to her stunned face - along with the owner's.

OK, I can be a jerk at times to stores not taking the customer seriously but you probably knew that by now.

That's when it hit me, wouldn't it be great to let owners know they missed out on a sale?

Something discreet and yet impossible to miss.

That's when I came up with this little cardthat said in part, "Wanted to let you know I am a paying customer who left. Without buying..."

How would you feel if you found this laying on a display table?

Who would you blame, the customer, the employee or the economy?

What would you do in response if you saw a woman place this on a display and walk away? Run after her, write her off as a wacko, or fret?

Good customer service is acknowledging there is a person in front of you, who drove or walked past a lot of other businesses to give you the opportunity to get some of their disposable income. If you don't treat it and them with basic respect of talking to them, they'll continue to look around. And leave. And that's deadly.

Bob Phibbs /
Bob Phibbs, the Retail Doctor, is a popular motivational speaker and small business Consultant who has transformed thousands of businesses throughout the world with his straightforward, proven advice. His success at making over businesses has been featured on PBS Life & Times, in the Los Angeles Times, Entrepreneur magazine, and the New York Times. www