How to Deal With That Empty Stash

The day has come...again. You can't find a single tokeable amount of weed in your apartment/house/boudoir. It just can't be! You know you had a last-ditch stash somewhere! But alas it's nowhere to be found and so you must grieve. In the interest of moving on with your life at the moment, recognize the stages so that you may move through them quicker:

1. Denial“No, I know I have a baggie somewhere in here. I like just picked up last week. I have some. I must.”

2. Panic “I LIKE JUST PICKED UP LAST WEEK. OH MY GOD WHERE IS IT? Is it hot in here or is it just me because I’m sweating up a storm.”

3. Anger “OKAY SERIOUSLY WHO TOOK MY WEED?! Ugh, I would have some left if I didn’t have to smoke everyone and their mothers out last night. I hate the world.”

4. Desperation“If I can just scratch off this resin in this pipe and I know I have some bits of weed in my backpack, I can do like one bowl…is that a nug on the floor? Oh, it’s a moldy bread crumb? Yeah no, I don’t want it anymore.”

5. Sadness “I just can’t believe I don’t have any weed. Could I have really smoked it all, already? What kind of person does that make me? I’ve spent so much on bud this month, what is my life?”

6. Distraction“It’s fine, I don’t need weed in my life. I’m fine without it. I’ll just watch Netflix. And clean the kitchen. And start a band.”

7. Acceptance of your fate “Starting a band would be so much more fun with weed.”

8. Determination"Alright one of these peeps have gotta have weed to sell me. I’m getting stoned and cleaning the kitchen before my Netflix documentary ends and my band goes viral if it’s the last thing I do.”

Notice

Important notice for Seattle US Cannabis Cup attendees. A company calling itself High Times Travel LLC (hightimestravel.com) has illegally infringed on the HIGH TIMES trademark to sell travel packages for the upcoming US Cup in Seattle.

This company is not affiliated with HIGH TIMES Magazine in any way. If you have purchased a travel package from High Times Travel LLC please contact HIGH TIMES immediately by emailing us at travelcomplaint@hightimes.com