To Buy or Not to Buy (Presents) That is the Question

Why does gift giving / presents have to be so damn difficult? I recently had a birthday party and as a part of the invitation we made it VERY clear not to buy me any presents, and that their company was more than enough. Sure enough the day arrives and a couple of people bought me gifts. Now I am grateful for the gifts and I appreciate what I was given, but I honestly did not want anyone to trouble themselves or spend their hard earned cash on presents for me – particularly when I specifically said not to do it.

Anyway, my wife and I recently went to a kids party for some people that we know fairly well, but I wouldn’t call us close friends. Their little boy was having his birthday and the invitation clearly said “No presents please”. Now being someone who genuinely didn’t want gifts for my birthday I took the invitation at face value and we didn’t bring a present to the party. As it turns out, of the 30 or so people that turned up, about 75% of them appeared to have brought a present…

Now i’m not sure what to think. Are we tight for not bringing a present? Do the parents of the child appreciate that we didn’t buy him a present, or do they secretly resent us because despite putting “no presents” on the invite, they actually expected people to come bearing gifts. The whole thing is mind boggling to me, and it happens all the time! In Glen world, if you want presents, then you shouldn’t put no presents on the invite.

So now I am confused about the whole thing and I am left feeling as if we should always buy presents no matter what the invite states.

Question

Are you able to shed any light on this? Should we always be buying gifts even when you are asked not to?

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I think if it says no presents, then no presents should be given. However, maybe this was their way of asking for cash instead of actual gifts? I’m not sure.Michelle recently posted..$12,640 in January Business Income

I never used to be able to not buy gifts even if people specifically said not to. I just thought they didn’t mean it! Nowadays, though my gift giving days are limited.

With kids though it’s different I think. Most people think they ‘have’ to buy for kids – even if their parents say not to bother. Maybe it’s something to do with their cuteness and innocence?! I’m sure though that the parents in question are probably glad that you took their invite at face value.Hayley @ A Disease Called Debt recently posted..The emotional stages of debt: Regret

I agree whole party gift giving thing is confusing. If the invitation says no gifts then we are not bringing a gift. We had a weird one recently where the family asked instead of gifts to bring $5 because they were collecting money for a local charity. I thought that was a nice touch until I thought, “Wonder if the money actually made it to the charity?” Hmmm….Brian @ Luke1428 recently posted..Global Shares Plunge! OMG…The World’s Coming to An End!

I do believe that there is more happiness in giving than in receiving. Even if my friends told me not to give a present but I still give. Money can be earned, If you have the capacity and capability of giving then why not?

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