Saturday, November 22, 2008

"But all my friends are going to the movie! My friend's mom can even drive me there! Please, please, pleeeease?"

"Hmmm, let me think about this. The movie doesn't start until midnight which means you won't be getting to bed until 2:00AM and it's a school night. You're only 12. Ahhh, no."

"But EVERYBODY's going! Why can't I? My friends are all going!!!!"

"I'm not your friends' mom or I'd make them stay home too."

"Mooo-oom!"

"Sorry hon, but you're not staying out that late on a school night. I'm just mean that way. I didn't tell you that you couldn't ever see the movie. You're just not going Thursday night."

At this point, she pouted and stomped off. I was a little disappointed. I mean, I usually get the "You're the meanest mom ever!" comment and I didn't even get that this time. (In all fairness, that comment almost always comes from Jackson and not Savannah.)

I honestly almost reconsidered. I mean, Savannah's a good kid. She helps me out tons! She gets all As and Bs on her report cards. What difference would it make? Maybe I should let her go with her friends....

Then I recalled a book I recently read. It's called Gentle Passages by Robin Jones Gunn. I had the chance to meet Robin at the retreat in Sonoma last month. What a sweetheart she is! She really just GLOWS. Any mother of a daughter needs to read this book. It's a short gift book with a few ideas for making those transitional years a little more meaningful and special for your precious daughters.

Anyway, Savannah wanting to do something that all her friends were doing reminded me of the first story in this book, The Secret of the Fine China Plate. My situation with Savannah wasn't exactly what Robin was talking about in her book, but it reminded me of Robin's story.

Savannah didn't hold a grudge and she got over her disappointment pretty quickly. I was actually impressed with how she handled it. But I know there will be many, many more times when I'm going to tell her "no" and not let her do something that all her friends are doing. Robin's book helped me to think of my daughters and how I parent them in a slightly different light.

I liked this book so much that I asked Robin if she'd autograph a copy for my readers. She happily agreed (I told you she's a total sweetheart!) In fact, she also gave me another gift book, Mothering by Heart, to give away. Sooo, leave me a comment here and I'll choose 2 winners (1 for each autographed book) on Wednesday. In the meantime, check out Robin's website. She's got a million awesome books (she writes adult fiction, teen fiction, nonfiction, you name it!) and you just have to look at her photo albums! She's got some really amazing pictures there!

I was so thankful that my daughter didn't ask to go at midnight -probably had something to do the fact that we already had tickets for Friday night! I would have said no too, btw. Midnight on a school night - for a movie! - that's just crazy.

Aren't the tween years FUN? My 11 year old daughter doesn't get angry and stomp off, but she does cry at the drop of a hat over the oddest things. Out of chocolate milk? Tears. Favorite pair of pants are too dirty to wear? Tears. It's like being mom to a puddle.

What I like about this story is that despite the title of your blog, you didn't tell Savannah that she couldn't go "because you said so". You clearly stated your reasons and they probably made sense to her (though she'd be loathe to admit it). That's when being a Mean Mom works... when you explain why the rules are in place. That helps them learn how to set their own boundaries in the future.

Oh grrr..just as I was leaving you a comment, my little one had a poopy diaper and i had to stop to change her. Then my little boy hopped on to the computer and navigated away from the comment page, so if you get a hald comment unfinished, i apologize now.Anyways, I was saying I can relate. My two older boys did not want to see Twilight, but when Gears of War 4 came out at midnight(one night two weeks ago) they both stayed out and waited in line to get it. Mind you they are older and it was not on a school night, but it was still a tough call.

I would LOVE a book about that! My daughter is 3 and we're having some growing up issues already! (basically, she's growing at a rate of about 10 years annually...or at least she seems to think so!) I could use something uplifting!

I want to win the book! I was the meanest mom when the movie "What Happens in Vegas" came out. I told my 12 year old daughter that I didn't think it appropriate for her age. But another mother wanted to see it and was taking a group of her daughter's friends. Not a fun night in my house! We got through it and I don't regret my decision but it's hard to be different from other parents.

It's so hard knowing what to do, and it seems disappointing our kids is easier & easier to do. I'm amazed at how permissiove some parents are! For the first time, my hubby & I allowed our 10 yr old son to go to the movies with a friend. I dropped them off & picked them up, but it was hard to let go, and that was for the 7:20 show! Keep up the good work & keep reaffirming us bad moms!

I am extremely jealous that you met Robin Jones Gunn! She is my favorite author--I LOVE the Glenbrooke series. They are totally my comfort reads. I hope Savannah is reading the Christy Miller series--well, maybe not yet, but when you think she's old enough. It's a gem.

Anyway...please enter me! Although it'll be awhile before I have a daughter that age--my little girl is 4 weeks old!!

You're a good mom as you already know because you said "no". Sometimes I get so frustrated at the parents of "all" their friends who can do what to me is so obviously not okay. I don't think I'm too strict, either. Then I realize sometimes that kids sometimes give their friends the wrong impression of their parents. I wouldn't let my 7 year son go into the house of his 7 year old friend because no parents were home. The other 6 year old friend said he was allowed and my son was about to be left out. Then the father of the 6 year old came down and when confronted with the same question gave an outright "NO" because the parents were not home. I had a 6 year old moment and said, "See, I told you so." So mature of me I know.

I wouldn't let my daughter go out past midnight on a school night, either! And I wouldn't send her off to see a PG-13 movie without previewing it myself first. I've read the books, and they're not exactly appropriate for a 12-year-old, in my opinion.

I'm a mean mom too. My son is 11 and is trying so hard to fit in with some kids in his class. He's always asking to do crazy stuff that I have to say no to. I can't count how many times I've gotten the mean mom comment just this month alone.

I LOVE Robin Jones Gunn. I read the Christy Miller series when I was Savannah's age, and truly, they changed my life. It changed my outlook on life and the things I found important. I am the person I am today in part because of Christy Miller. That's so awesome that you got to meet Robin Jones Gunn!

Thanks for writing about Robin. I did check out her website and plan on checking out a few of her books. Her writings look very inspirational. I have two teenage daughters both of whom I love dearly, but find very challenging a lot of the time. I'm excited to read about her views on this.

About the "meanest mom" thing. Tell your kids that you got a degree in "Mean Momness" and that you were only fourth in your class. That means that there are three other moms out there who are meaner than you. I think I could be one of those three....

I think you made the right decision, she's a bit too young to be out until that time of night, especially on a school night.You should tell her to arrange with some friends to go at the weekend since she's good with her grades and everything else.I'm glad she got over it though, shows she's going to be pretty level headed and mature when she's older.

She's lucky she even gets to see it this month though, we have to wait until December/January to see it over here! Totally unfair.

I'd love to have a copy of either one of those books! I've got an 11 year old daughter, a 12 year old son, and a 2 year old toddler... any help I can get at this point! Headng over to check out Robin's site! Thanks, Dawn!

Ok, so I'm trying again! I like to read and I'm sure these books are wonderful, so let's go for it! I have 3 raised? (are they ever REALLY raised?) boys and I would love to see what I should have done! Although, in my defense I think they all turned out pretty well!

Saying "no" to a request by a 12 year old to go to a midnight-2am showing of a movie on a school night sounds a no-brainer, but I'm Mum to a three-year-old and I'm sure some of the things I give in to (allowing yet another viewing of "Cinderella", at what time in the morning??) would baffle wiser parents!

I love it when a book "speaks" to me. And right now, I'd really appreciate a parenting book that did just that, as I, too, feel like the meanest mom on the planet... and mine are only 3 and 8. Robin's site is phenomenal... you always have amazing recommendations.

Dawn, I have been a long time reader of your blog! I have 2 girls, 8 and 10, and could definitely benefit from this book! There is already so much drama in our house, I can't imagine how I am going to handle puberty!

Dawn - you are an inspiration! Don't know how you do it with 6 because my 3 can just make me crazy. You did the right thing. Sometimes being the best mom ever means you have to be the meanest mom ever!

Good for you! While I had many of those "PUH-LEAAAASE?? All my friends are doing it!" moments growing up, and my mom almost always responded the way you did, I'm not scarred for life. In fact, I can only think of one incident that I wish she would have handled differently, out of my 18 years of living at home. She gave me a lot of freedom when I wanted to do reasonable things, but for episodes like wanting to see a midnight movie, she would have said "NO" too. Looking back (and having only recently entered 'adulthood'), I'm so glad she did!

I absolutely LOVE Robin's books! These are books I'd love to have....would help greatly with my 2 kids...especially my daughter (who is sooooo strong-willed at 6 years old that I'm trying NOT to imagine what the teen years are going to be like!).

My clone seems to think I boss her around too much. I invited her to ask her two teenaged brothers just how much THEY got bossed around at her age. I will be hitting menopause about the time she hits puberty. My husband is in for a total treat in a few years.

I have two daughters, ages 5 and 1, and I am really, really enjoying them right now. I am especially enjoying my five year old, who is so full of questions about life, and God, and science, and ... just everything. She's so cheerful, so willing to give hugs and kisses, such a ray of sunshine, and it's just so easy to love her right now. However, I remember what I was like as a teenager, and I'm already dreading losing my darling girl to the onslaught of teenage hormones. I understand now why parents say, "If only they could stay little forever."

My one year old is developing more of her own personality every day, too... I can't wait to see her when she's five years old! I can tell she's going to be such an interesting and unpredictable girl.

Dawn,I have 4 daughters ages 12,10,10 and 1. Needless to say it feels like aliens have invaded my house lately with all of hormones floating around. I could use any book that might lead me in the right directions :)Tammy

This story made me think back to my teenage years. More than once my mother told me "no"..."if all your friends jumped off a bridge..." "Well, you're not everyone else..." Now I'm a mother, (of 3 boys though, no girls) and yes, I find myself saying the same things. (Even though I said I wouldn't say those things to MY kids.) But I'm ever so thankful. When I see what some of those "friends" have done with their lives, I'm SOOO thankful for my strict upbringing.

Hi DawnI have been reading your blog for a few months now and I love the fact that you don't try to pretend you have perfect children. I have a 2 girls aged 1 and 2 and I am not coping very well right now, as one is exiting the terrible two's the other is entering. They are very full on. How do you manage with 6? AMAZING!! On another note I remember from the age of 12-16 I HATED my mum, she was the worst person in the world in my view then. Now however she is my best mate. I call her everyday!! I am not sure what changed but I am glad it all worked out. I am sure Savannah will be old enough to realise one day why you say no sometimes. Love you Blog!! Bye

I have been reading Robin Jones Gunn books since *I* was 12! (I am 30 now.) In fact, just last year, I got all of the Christy Miller books in their new rebinds for Christmas! Now, my Mom, sister and I are reading the new Katie Weldon series. Robin is AMAZING!

My wise and wonderful mother was mean like that and I survived and flourished. I learned from her and in turn was mean to my own, now lovely, daughter. She has recently made me a grandmother. If I win a book, I will give it to her.

I often pull the "birth" card out with my children. You know, the "I indured labor WITHOUT meds and gave birth to you! This gives me the prerogative to say NO!" card. Ya I get the eye roll and mumbling while leaving the room from my kids, but I have boys and they will never truely understand what I went through to give them life. I will use this guilt method for as long as I can!P.S. Even so, I would love to win the books.

I have an almost 12 yr old 6th grader who constantly says, "you dont understand", "I really NEED______ "(fill in with particular clothes item) even though she has a giant pile of almost new clothes on her bedroom floor, and "you are so mean and I hate you!" I could really use that book because I also have a 7 yr old daughter following in her footsteps..

Come on Random Number drawing. Pick me! Pick ME! PICK ME! LOL!! Sorry Dawn had to do it. can you see me jumping up and down flailing like a crazy person. I have 2 great daughters and would love all the help I can get to make our relationship the best it can be while still being their mom.

Those transition years are starting to scare me as my daughter is 10 and already hitting the buttons. I'm a single mom and my daughter is great but I do remember being a teen and pushing my parents' buttons in a much less scary world. Not sure quite how we are going to both survive until she's an adult.

People actually do those movies at that hour?? We took our daughter to see High School Musical the Friday night it opened 'cuz it just happened to be her 13th birthday and that sounded as special as anything. Then I saw it also ran at midnight Thursday ... a school night. I obviously live under a rock 'cuz I had no clue they did such things! A movie that draws school age kids ... on a school night ... at midnight. Uh-huh. I'd never allow it ... mean mom that I am! ;-)

Thanks for the heads up on that book. I love Robin Jones Gunn and sure could use a book! My mom died not quite 2 years ago and my oldest just became a teenager. I surely do miss her and her wisdom! (That would be my mom's. My daughter has "wisdom" oozing from her every pore --- and shares it freely...) lol! She's a good kid, but I'm looking forward to the day I become an intelligent human being again. ;-)

Hmmm, that book about raising daughters sounds very interesting. I love to read those inspiration, make you think, all about parenting styles type of book. It is so refreshing to receive others thoughts on subjects and be able to apply the information in your own life. As for poor Savannah I was a teenager not too long ago and still would never allow my teenage daughter out that late. Too many parents give their young ones too much freedom and maybe not the night of the movie, but some other night the freedom might make them able to make some bad decisions. Great job being a "mean mom":)

I think you did the right thing- I wouldn't have let my daughter go then either! I would love to be entered to win this book. I read a lot of Robin Jones Gunn's books as a teenager but haven't recently. I have noticed she has more adult fiction out. Thanks for the opportunity to enter!

I really want to check this book out now! I taught high school and have this idea about how to tell a tween or teenage girl no when "everybody else is doing it", but I fear it is a different ball game when you are the parent and the teen is your daughter. I need all the help I can get!

You are a good mom... but welcome to the mean mom's club! ha,haMy daughter (14) went to see it Friday afternoon. She knew better than to ask to go at midnight! I guess that if you are consistent, they eventually get it.I am not a religious person, but would love to win the book so I can give it to my SIL. I know that she would like it.

I have always loved Robin Jones Gunn books! I read her Christy Miller series growing up and all the Palisade Romance books that she wrote! She’s an absolutely wonderful Author :) I received her Mothering by Heart book when I had our first and I still continue to pick it up and read now. I’m so glad to know about this book Gentle Passages. I’ll have to pick one up for myself and my sister if I don’t win it.Thank you so much for posting about this!Anna :)

My daughter is almost three and already shows signs of being strong-willed and stubborn. I need all the help I can get, and this book sounds like a good one! :) Thanks for sharing the info so more of us know we're not just "mean" moms. :)

I have to say I had a mom that never let me do anything-actually my friends joke that I was grounded all four years of high school to this day.

I understand you reason- I have one rule in my house- you ask once, and only once. If the answer is yes, you would not want me to change my mind, so why would I if I said no?! makes sense even to my 7 year old.I have two girls that are 6 years apart, and I know that so much will change from the first time I go through 12-18, since by time once is done the other will be just starting *(at least I hope it takes that long!)*Hope she enjoys the movie this weekend, I know my nephew did!Melissa, Illinois

Just so you know, I take my title as "Meanest Mom Ever" very seriously and will fight you to the end for it. My daughter is a high school freshman and STILL doesn't have a cell phone. GASP! She's the only one in her class. GASP! I'm wrecking her social life. Double GASP! She can't have a MySpace page either. TRIPLE GASP!!! Before I run out of gasps (or gas, it is 9:41 on a Saturday night - and yes, I purposely got on-line to read your blog - yes, I have no life, hmm which maybe explains why I'm such a mean mom), I would LOVE to win the book. I promise to read it quickly and share with all my friends at work who all have daughters and who I recently turned on to your blog. We've laughed hard Friday at the wacky Googles. We're fairly confident you would fit in just fine with our group - a group of really mean moms!!! Hang in there Savahnna!!

"Savannah didn't hold a grudge and she got over her disappointment pretty quickly. I was actually impressed with how she handled it."

Because she knew before asking that you would never allow it. Just shows you are doing something right. Good job Mom. :)

Oh...and hook me up..I have three girls, ages 4, 3 and 2 and I could use some advice for those transitional years! The thought of having three girls in high school at the same time is terrifying to me!! :)

My son had friends from school that went, one went with his mom and one of the teachers... that made my jaw drop. On a school night - really now what were they thinking having that movie open like that on a school night.

You are a wonderful mom! I think that you did the right thing to protect your child. She probably would have been fine but NO twelve year old needs to be out watching a movie at midnight on a school night. Savannah sounds like an amazing young lady and one day she will have the same convo with her daughter!{{{{{hugs}}}}}

I am the mom to a daughter with sometimes the attitude well beyond her 7 years of age! Being a "single parent" the majority of the year, with my husband seemingly always on deployment, insight on another mother would always be helpful! You being such a comical Mom is one of the reasons I subscribe to your blog...but hey...the more help the merrier right?!?! WIthout sounding like a total suck up for a book I would like to send a thanks out to you for reminding us that even the stressful parenting moments of life can STILL bring us a smile. Okay so maybe not at the moment but at least a few hours later! :)

Well, I have two girls (and I've never had the best relationships with other females). My chickies are only 3 and 5 - but I have a feeling that 'transitional' period is going to sneak up on me quickly!!!

Keep up the great work, Dawn. Being a good (mean) Mom can be tough but isn't it the most wonderful thing you've ever done? :=) I'd love to pass these books on to my daughter, who is the proud parent of a 1 year old. Thanks!

It was so weird reading your post- I had the EXACT same conversation with my daughter all last week! Wow. The only difference was that my daughter thought _I_ was the meanest mom ever. Until she fell asleep at 9:30.

Ha! That's nothing. You should see how mean I am. In fact, I was talking to my husband about it today on our way home from the NU game... apparently I'm mean (according to a friend of mine) because I would just tell Little Miss "no" if she wanted the American Girl doll bed with the canopy and beads hanging down from it ... for $105 or $180 or something equally ridiculous.

And I haven't looked so this is just an assumption, but ummm isn't Twilight rated R or am I making that up? Regardless, I think you made the right decision, and I'm sure there were more parents with you than you think!

That Twilight causes craziness for young and 'old' girls alike. I stayed up until 3am reading the book - like an addict. Not so good at 6:30 when my four kids started stirring. I can't wait to see the movie!!

Twilight has made me the meanest mom in the world too, but not the movie - the book. I've told my 9-year-old she's too young, but all her friends are reading the series. I've read them and really don't feel they're appropriate for a 9-year-old, so I said no. Wow, the temper tantrum I saw for days on end over that one! I just tell my kids it's a compliment to be called the meanest mom because it means I'm doing something right. They hate it.

As the mother of a daughter, 2 step daughters, and recently 1 foster daughter, I could certainly get a lot of use out of that book. My daughter is 12. My step daughters are 19 and 17 and my foster daughter is 5. (I also have four boys, too.) ;)

I've never read the Twilight books, but I don't see myself allowing my kids to read them or see the movies. That's just me. Because I haven't read them and won't, could someone explain why they are such a huge craze? And how could vampire movies be good for kids? Seriously not being judgmental - just perplexed.

Dawn, this has nothing to do with today's post, but I saw on your twitter update that you found Peppermint Mocha creamer. Please tell me what store you found it at. I have been looking for weeks for it and I can't find it. You could leave me a comment at www.sixcallsthatsall.blogspot.com. Thanks Dawn!LaNae

I wish I still had a mean mom to tell me not to stay up late and watch Twilight. But I have mean kids who remind me when i've done something stupid. Thanks for all the laughs over this year. We sure did need them.-Rachel

I'm really mean. And I have more daughters than you, Dawn (granted, two of them are actually adults, but the other two are still grade school age, and the youngest is incredibly stubborn and already rolls her eyes and stomps her foot when she thinks I'm being mean).

I remember all to well my mom telling me I couldnt do something all my friends were doing. I might have hated her for it then, but I respect her for it now. Savannah will do the same. I only hope my daughter will in the future (she is 4).

Hi Dawn, For years I was the "meanest mom ever!" Now, I am the "sweetest grammy ever" having fun watching my 2 grown daughters be the "meanest moms ever" to their kids! My daughters will tell you that at the time they truly thought I was soooo unfair. Now, they thank me for being that way because through it all they knew they were deeply loved and protected. Sometimes I could sense their relief when I said no. They could blame "mean old mom" and they were relieved to have had the decision made for them. It will be hard to do---but keep it up. Remember the old story of the piece of coal--kept under constant pressure will eventually reveal a shining diamond!

Yesterday morning my 11.5 year old told me she was NEVER talking to me again! I reminded her of that comment later in the day when she told me the same thing again, and she talked all day in between! Sometimes we just have to be the meanest mom, and I am actually one of the most "accomodating" moms of her friends! This pre-teen phase is fun, but trying at times.

I would love love to read the book, and I think if I don't (which I won't I'm sure! win, I will treat myself with it for an XMAS gift!)

My girls LOVE Robin Jones Gunn! They have read nearly all of her teen fiction books and then donated them to the town library! As the mom of five girls, ages 14 down to 7, (yes, my husband will suffer for the next 13 years) any book which offers to ease the teenager-parent angst would be a blessing!

It's so hard when you have to be the mean mom but we all do it. My kids are only 5 and 3 and I've already heard how I'm so mean and that it's not fair! I'd love either of those books!! How great of you to get them autographed for your blog readers. :)

I foresee that I will be a mean mom in the future to my daughter. ANy helpful hints would be helpful. Oh and I would not allow my daughter to go to a midnight movie on a school night either. She can go Friday night with all the other girls whose mena mom said No.

I'm raising three girls and I would love this book. My oldest is 12 also. She was not interested in Twilight, but many of her friends and classmates saw it at midnight. She is in the same boat as Savannah a lot. She doesn't have a cell phone (yes, I know, the horror of it all) and on Halloween I had the audacity of telling her she had to be off the streets by 9:00. She didn't mind, but her friends gave her grief. Her friend even told her that my daughter needed a cell phone because her friend said so. Like Savannah she helps me a lot with her sisters (my youngest has Down syndrome) and I like to try to do things for her, but I also want her to grow up and be responsible adult and I'm not going to buy her love with favors. In the end, I'm her mom, not her best friend and I'll be the Mean Mom whenever I need to. I told her she can blame me whenever she needs to if her friends give her a hard time. That's also part of my job, to take the blame so she can save face with her friends. Sometimes she doesn't want to do something, but if she just said no her friends would not understand. That's when I tell her I said no and just blame me even though she agreed with me all along.

I'm 38 and I'll still never forget when my mom wouldn't let me go roller skating with all my friends. I was really the only one that couldn't go because no one's parent was going to be there, only an older brother. I think I was 12. I didn't get over it, but on the other hand, all those girls that went ended up in not so good situations as the became mature teenagers.

Does she have anything to say about parenting the toddler/preschool set? I swear my 3.5yo daughter get on each others nerves just as if she were a hormonal teenager. Seriously, she's 3. How can she get under my skin so intensely? Anyway, would love to read these books. I'm off to check out the website now.

I have four daughters and I could really use the book. Please pick me! Your conversation with Savannah sounded just like the conversation that happened at my house with my oldest daughter. BTW the movie was pretty good, but the book was much better.

I just love your words of wisdom. My daughter is 5 and sometimes it's very challenging! i think for the me the hardest part is sometimes it's like looking in a mirror. Her facial expressions, tone etc. All me. I better get this book now so i'm more prepared! Thanks for the info. I'm putting it on my reading list now! And, thanks for the insight!Tricia

Hi Dawn,Being that I'm Mom to two daughters ages 13 and 6, I would love to read this book. My oldest asked me the same question...Can I see the midnight show with ALL my friends. I too said "No...absolutely not. It's a school night and you're not going." She took it well...I think she had already prepared herself for my "No" answer. I will take her and a friend over the Thanksgiving break. I am sure there are parents who won't let their child read books about vampires...I'm thankful she's reading. My daughter is 13 years old and I believe she is mature enough to handle the material. There was a lot of controversy on the Goosebumps series if I recall. It took a book about vampires and all her friends reading it to light the literary fire that I have been unsuccessful at for years. I tried magazine subscriptions on her favorite subjects, summer reading programs, weekly library trips, Barnes & Noble gift cards etc. Nothing worked...except this book series. Hopefully the literary fire will stay lit. I am, for now, thankful she is reading something. Cheers,Diana

Ohhhhhhhhh, I would LOOOOOOOOVE that book. Lately struggling as the mom of a 9 1/2 (going on 30) year old, recently divorced, sharing custody 50/50, and an ex who is, shall we say, not always complimentary of my skills as a parent...needless to say, second guessing myself has become second nature. Anyway, good luck to anyone who gets it and happy parenting all!

My son just turned 13 and there is no way I would let him go to a movie at midnight on a school night! He would never get up for school the next day, not to mention who or what else would be out at that hour. I think you did the right thing. I would certainly enjoy either of those books. I'm new to the teenage years and actually a little nervous about it. Was it hard for you when you became the mom of a teenager?

oh my gosh...that book sounds awesome. I am a mom of 2 girls ages 3 and almost 5. They are 20 months apart and will both be teenagers at the same time.

I'm a very strict mom and sometimes question myself and my parenting style. I always feel mean when I make a tough decision with them and I can only imagine that it'll just get worse as they get older.

Luckily my daughter is only 4, so I haven't gotten a midnight movie request yet. We're still into the princess stuff and haven't quite reached vampires yet (or wizards, for that matter!) I have, however, gotten the "you're so mean to me!" comment. Already. Can't wait for it to morph into "meanest mom ever"... Good job, Dawn, you're the best!

sigh, tell me where i need to go to get my official membership card to the "Mean Mother's Club" and sign up for this book. My daughter is only 21 months old, but after catching her pulling dirt out of one of my plants, and dumping her in the tub (she actually ATE who knows how much dirt..and honestly, i feed her) she gave me "the look".

You know, the look had she had the words to actually say would have said...