So that's it then ? I just have to pretendI live in Britain to set my clock right, is it ? As if I don't pretend enough already here ? What time zone are you in ? Or does the word TIME means nothing to you, as I suspect ?

You're right, mi Formose...it doesn't! I am a Roman; a Spaniard; and a student of archaeology, paleontology, geology and animal behavior. None of this is conducive to any very exact reckoning of the hours, or even the time-zones. Or, to put it into the positive: My entire life has been all about sitting very, very still for a very long time. I'm on a different wavelength. I'm also retired and home all day. That's right, I don't know the difference between Wednesday and Saturday; I work both days; I'm off both days. Time...? Be on time...? Whatever for? The rocks, the sea, the fossils, the wolves, the ruins will all still be there when I log off for the night, and long after I myself return to the earth's embrace.

"Republican dreams"? --To give them up, I'd have had to have any. I am an Imperial Roman, specifically of the Flavian-Antonine persuasion, when a hick from southern Spain already had the Citizenship and could at least hope to sire an Emperor or two.

Salve iterum, O Father of the Fatherland,

Well, since you have come out as an Imperialist, I'll have to declare my position too. I'm leaning towards the Empire myself, although it is very PunC. That is if you have a good Emperor, and that is often the problem. I don't see the Empire as an oppressor of the little people as conventional historiography often does. Ideally a good Emperor is the protector of the plebs against the oligarchs and plutocrats. Caesar himself, Augustus, and of course the Antonines were good examples, I think. A democratic republic would be the ideal system, if it worked. And it often does not.

As Plato ( better known as Aristocles ) said : 'If the people behave responsably, they should have the right to choose their own leaders. But if they do not, someone with some sense should take control.' (I'm quoting from memory here.)

Ultimately, whatever system you have, sovereignty always lays with 'the people'. So, in practice an Emperor is maybe the better choice. If you get a bad one, there's ways to get rid of them. It's a bit messy, but hey, it's not like anyone is forced to take the job.

On the 'blessings' of organised religion, Roman or other, and especially taking those things too serious, I have already written some things earlier, but I'll tell you a bit more still, on the other side, at the Furiosi later.

Say, Marii - what sort of fossils do you collect? As a long-standing trilobite partisan, I'm wondering if they might be seen among your collection. (I'm assuming a collection!) I've even noticed lately that some online jewelry shops are offering 'trilobite jewelry', silver or even gold images of the ancient (and I mean really ancient) three-lobed fossils. I didn't know there was any market at all for that!

An empire is a 'super-organism' in many ways, I think, and follows its own 'instincts' to a large degree, despite the contributions of its various vital component organisms, like us.

Yes, I saw that picture, wandering around on the board, that's how I learned about her. But I did miss that sad turn of events. So, you hope everything is going to turn out right, in the end ? Is she coming to stay with you ?

My toughts are with you.

Hope that balloons are still appropriate.

( can't get those special ones working, of course )

Say, is she a 'sinister' ? She's giving the salvo with her left paw in that picture, if I'm not mistaken.

She'd been spending more and more time at Soror's (her mother's) house over the last month: afternoons; all day; overnighters. On a.d. XIII Kal. Aprilis (20 Martius), she came home "for the weekend". Court on the 23d went the way we hoped it would, although DHS tried to pull one last teeny-weeny little stunt: "Review hearing in no later than 60 days." The iudex made it 70 days, I'm sure just to tweak them. It worked. <g>

We now have full physical custody of Darla Ana. Legal custody will have to await those review hearings, but unless Soror flies off the handle again that shouldn't take any longer than six months.

Formosus noster has asked if the kid's a southpaw. She was four hours old in that picture, and still trying to figure out exactly what those pudgy things on the ends of her wrist were. She was not slugging me yet, and had not established a preference.

Na, the actual Opening Salvo took place at about age 7 weeks. She had just finished giving me a long, deep look--and then all of a sudden she pegged me! It looked like this:

Darla Really Likes Marius!.jpg

From that day to this, she's known I'm the one she can play rough with. >({|:-)

She came home, as I said, on the 20th. On the 21st we had a party. The Cub was there, and Soror, and the Cub's father; Mater and her hubby, on leave from Kuwait; and of course Uncle Marius. Here we are:

Celebration.jpg

Darla is almost seven months old, sitting up by herself, and beginning (soft) solid food. She likes her toys, the musical puppy, my singing. She loves the book I got her--textures for little feet. When I hold her a certain way she throws her arms back--"We can flyyyy!" I look forward to years of nature walks, road trips, help with homework (does that count as "tech support"?)...and stories. All my stories, waiting all these years, all hers now if she wants them.

And who knows, maybe in another dozen years she'll be able to take *my* job!! >({|;-p

In amicitia et fide,

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Well, nobody's volunteering for my job; we haven't been able to elect someone to my job; and no one will let us appoint them to do my job. I'm still waiting for a squad of thugs/goons/retired gladiators to come throw me out of my computer chair. Hasn't happened. All the nifty things you guys want on the site...they haven't happened either. I don't know how to do them. We're still waiting for a *real* Webmaster, not a placeholder like me.

So I guess the Aedileship is going to have to become hereditary! And you know kids these days; before she even starts school she'll have your Flash navbar and Feriae videos and Latin-pronunciation snippets up in no time. (Heh heh...If you can't find 'em, breed 'em!) >({|;-p

I know I have been behaving rather (try very) erratically in recent months--thrashing about like a creature in pain, driving people away and allowing myself to be driven away into progressively longer silences. Some of the latter began with certain well-known recent Board events; but it's been long enough now that, if I still feel that way, I have to put the blame on me. No one else is responsible for my feelings, my reactions to things. The brain chemistry doesn't help; but it doesn't dictate everything, either. Yet I feel off-balance, out of kilter, and mostly (quite frankly) like being left the hell alone until I sort myself out. I have not been kind to those unfortunate souls who have needed to interact with me during this time, Annia Minucia being only the latest such. We had a personality conflict; we might have had one anyway, but the way I've been feeling these days made it very much worse. I maltreated her in the matter of the Board templates. There, I've said it. And I'd apologise, but again, in my current state, I can't assure anyone that I wouldn't do it again.

For various reasons, mostly bogus (says me), I have not been able to address my issues with my psychiatric team at the VA. The front desk keeps scheduling my appointments for days the therapist is going to be at a conference, working at the other VA facility in my area, or otherwise unavailable. Long story short, I haven't been seen since August. *That* is not helping.

Does anyone remember me saying, back in March when we got the Cub back, that "Legal custody will have to await those review hearings, but unless Soror flies off the handle again that shouldn't take any longer than six months" ? The hearing was to take place on 14 September. In early August, my sister--the Cub's mother--had a major psychiatric episode. Worse than mine; when DHS came to take the child into protective custody, she is said to have assaulted the social workers and the armed sheriff's deputies (dunno, I wasn't there), to the tune of four felony counts and one misdemeanor. She was no easier to live with the seven weeks she spent in jail; she says they Tased her twice, and Mater and I were denied visits because Soror kept "acting up". Her darling hubby left the state the week after her arrest and only comes back for court hearings and Darla visits. Soror was committed to a state mental-health facility sometime between 18 and 23 September, and it wasn't until a couple of weeks ago that the brave man (sh'yeah right) got up the nerve to go see her. He and I had a talk about that. I wasn't gentle.

Since then it's been hell's-bells to try to get that kid some time with her family. Mater and the foster parents, with DHS' blessing, finally came up with a workable arrangement: Darla comes over Monday mornings, stays over, and goes back Tuesday nights. We have also scored some long weekends with her, most notably on her first birthday (5 September, if you're curious), and she's coming over tonight and staying 'til Tuesday just in time for my birthday. DHS is at last moving forward with what they call a 'kinship placement' in my Mater's (her Avia's) home. Home inspection is next Thursday.

So this is slowly (and hopefully) resolving; but we've all been taking an emotional beating for over a year now, since they took her the first time, and I'm afraid it's finally begun to show on me these last several months. Hell of a time to not get counselling, eh? And, needless to say, with all that going on it's really difficult for me to get worked up about a Web site--any Web site, with or without the tumbleweeds.

The California third of the family is here and leaves tomorrow pm after the (Catholic) memorial service. (The rest of us are in New York/New Jersey and Venezuela.) They've been awesomely supportive, especially to my mom. We've even managed to do some fun things together (like seeing Avatar!) when not occupied with the arrangements.

But Avia and I were close. We rambled all over Venezuela together when I was 12 and 13. I'm going to be a mess when this one hits...as if I weren't a mess already with Soror's crisis and the Darla business.