Free to play, learn and love

Month

December 2017

This week, we have been sick. The entire family is sick. So we have been bingeing on watching David Attenbourgh and all the documentaries he has ever created. We recently just bought a blu-ray version of Blue Planet and Blue Planet II which has been amazing to see.

What strikes me the most is watching the mammals. All the apes, the cats, wolves and bears. When the mums have their babies, their babies are with them. When they grow up a little, they are still with their mum. When they are ‘teens’, they are still with their pack.

So why is it, that we are the most intelligent beings on this planet, and we are not raised together?

We are suppose to be this amazing being, that can achieve so much, yet we apparently have no clue on how to raise our children. We need to send them to specialists, everything needs to be checked by someone else, and we apparently do not have all the knowledge and skills to raise our children. We have to send them to others so that they can learn the basic skills to survive as a human being.

From the age of 3, children are sent to kindergartens. I sent my eldest to kindergarten, and there was many tears. He simply was not happy to go. He wanted to be by my side. But not trusting my parenting and not trusting my instincts, I believed what others said, and I walked away. (He’s now 7 and homeschooled… just so you know).

From the age of 5, children are sent to schools for 6-7 hours a day, 5 days a week where they are segregated into classes with children their age, which they must get along with. They must be able to listen, sit down, to get along, to express themselves, to read, to count, to be happy with all this.

But what happens when they don’t? If they don’t listen, if they don’t express themselves, if they won’t sit still, and what happens when they are simply not happy with all this? The teacher will tell the parent, that possibly, little Billy needs to see a specialist. Because he isn’t normal. He doesn’t fit.

And this goes on for the next 13 years of your child’s life. They are not with you, they are at school.

I personally use to think this way, that I didn’t have the knowledge or experience to raise my children. I needed to take them to all sorts of specialists to ensure that they fit into school and sometimes, I would see their spark dull a little… because they were just being kids.

But after a full year of homeschooling, stepping through life with them for an entire year together, I now know that all my children want, is me. And my goodness, how they shine when they are nurtured, when they are loved and raised together.

Our children have not only become confident in the way the speak to others, they have been able to discover what it is they love about life, what makes them tick. Incidentally, I know several adults who still don’t know what makes them tick. But the most beautiful thing about all this, is that there weren’t any specialists involved (except for our 3 year old who needed grommets put in his ears), all our social and mental issues were fixed because we homeschooled. The children felt safe, they felt loved, and they felt that they were listened to, honoured and respected.

Now, I understand their are children who truly do need specialists, and that ADHD, Autism and ODD are disorders that require attention. I understand this. But I also believe that their has been an epidemic of diagnosed cases with parents who worry about their children’s behaviour.

But it just does not agree with me or our family to send a young child off to someone else to teach and raise. And later in life, if my children choose to go to school, then so be it. But it will be their decision, and not based on what society says they should do, or who they should be.

The system cannot give them the cuddles they need when they just aren’t feeling all that together on any particular day. The school teaches them things, but it cannot show them what it is that makes them tick, and then allows them to delve into their interest for hours and hours on end.

I refuse to believe that we are the most intelligent beings created (or evolved, which ever you believe), yet we are also the being that does not trust its own ability to raise our own children. Animals have been raising their children naturally, and the little animals learn all that they need to survive in the world that they are given.

Why is it that we cannot do the same? Have we made the world so complicated that we can no longer parent our own children?

Well, I for one, am taking a stand. And saying that all my kids need to live a healthy, resilient and fruitful life, is love, togetherness and for them to know that the family is always on their side.