Category Archives: Surrender

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Was going to do another of the 15 things you should give up to be happy today, but picked up the Anatomy of a Calling by another of my faves, Lissa Rankin MD : Check it out here. I opened it to page 120, which had the new questions Lissa was asking her patients after she had realised medicine wasn’t about 15 minute interviews and doling out medications. Here is the list:

Do you feel lonely, isolated, misunderstood, or disconnected?

If you could break any rule without consequences, what rule would you break?

Are you in a romantic relationship, and if so, are you happy? If not, do you wish you were?

Do you feel like you are in touch with your life’s purpose, fulfilling your divine assignment here on this planet?

Do you feel stressed about money?

Do you feel spiritually connected?

Do you feel free to be your authentic self?

At the moment the one that is a bit out of place for me is question six, do you feel spiritually connected, so that is our subject for today:

1. See that is says We are Love, not they are Love. Hard to remember at times.

2. I feel I met one of these people recently. I forget to inhale when I am near her: Soul Kind of Feeling.

3. We are magnificent and broken all at the same time, we need to journey through both to contact our soul, it is made up of everything.

4. It’s not often you look across a room and go, wow, what a great mind, yet it is that and their heart that will keep the relationship going: Just the Two of Us.

5. Contentious statement, but where else can you be?

6. I brought a book of poetry written by a man who spent a year living in Wild Dog Valley. It is compared to David Whyte, Mary Oliver and John O’Donoghue. Each poem is a powerful vignette, the name: Lucid Nature by Sean O’Carroll: Human Behaviour.

7. Time for a biography as I have no clue who Elizabeth Lesser is, let’s have a look: ELIZABETH LESSER is a bestselling author and the cofounder of Omega Institute, the renowned conference and retreat center located in Rhinebeck, New York. Elizabeth’s first book, The Seeker’s Guide, chronicles her years at Omega and distills lessons learned into a potent guide for growth and healing.

8. Two of my dear friends, Denise and Ed have many of their ex students as Facebook friends. I think thats because they did this , not told them what to learn: That’s what I like.

9. We all want to be love, but have to remember our picture of love is different to every other individual on the planet.

11. Buddha lived in a time of overt sexism, I sure he meant women as well.

12. I have doubts about people who go away for a week, a month even a year who come back and pass themselves off as spiritual guru’s, it’s for at least a lifetime: Lord Shiva.

13. That thought that keeps returning, It does it for a purpose, when we learn what we have to it will disappear.

14, Amanda Palmer, The Art of Asking, TED talk, what else could this bring to mind: Here it is.

15. I would call this two souls meeting and creating a very spiritual moment.

Lissa’s new patient intake form was 12 pages long, she says the two most illuminating questions she asked were:

What is your body saying no to?

What does your body need in order to heal?

I think we need to heal our spiritual connection as a priority, writing this has helped me do that.

The music is great, one of the great Australian tracks Soul Kind of Feelings, Lord Shiva anthem, an amazing flash mob version of Ode to Joy, Bjork and the amazing the Art of Asking TED talk by Amanda Palmer.

” The reason many people in our society are miserable, sick , and highly stresses is because of an unhealthy attachment to things they have no control over.” – Steve Maraboli

Luminita Saviuc states that in every instance of transformation, the transformative insight was always one that led her to letting go , surrendering and giving up, in the best sense possible. And perhaps out of all the self-sabotaging habits of thought and behaviour, the one that’s far too common is our desire to control aspects of our reality that are actually beyond our control.

I can speak from experience that staying in control can be costly, as I have experienced several mental health periods in my life which I fought seeking the help that I needed to restore the balance in my life.

So how do we relate to control in our society. let’s take a peek:

1. This reminds me of the Activation work where we get in touch with our Essence in life I do with my mentor Arion Light: Link to the Source.

2. The history of psychedelics dates back tens of thousands of years, it is only in the past 100 years that there has been scientific and counterculture interest in these substances. They were originally used to obtain transcendental experiences: Purple Haze.

3. This is one form of control it would be a great thing to let go of, refusing to get back up.

7. And yet, there are profoundly powerful acts of control that we need in our life.

8. We often lose control when we just don’t want to wait anymore, and say that’s enough. Remember that what people talk about on their death beds is what they regret usually, not what they celebrate: No Regrets.

9. What would our lives be like if we were so in control that we were incapable of giving back?

10. Sarah Dessen is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of over a dozen novels for teens, which have received numerous awards and rave reviews. Her books have been published in over thirty countries and have sold millions of copies worldwide: You’re the one that I Want.

11. Ah, the women who introduced the term The Work to the world. Another pearl of wisdom: Let Life live you – It does anyway.

14. A way to make sure that people stop relating to you from a position of power: Stop Complaining.

15. A possibility if we set our controls for the heart of the sun.

” So don’t be frightened, dear friend, if a sadness confronts you larger than you have ever known, casting its shadow all over you do. You must think that something is happening within you, and remember that life has not forgotten you; it holds you in its hand and will not let you fall. Why would you want to exclude from your life any uneasiness, any pain, any depression, since you don’t know what work they are accomplishing within you? – Rainer Maria Rilke

I don’t know if I ever saw myself as someone who came up with excuses. The way I saw it, Life treated me unkindly, and If I was living an unhappy life it wasn’t because of me. It wasn’t because I was making up excuses, but because that’s how my life was. I was just being “realistic.”

The opening lines of chapter 4 in Luminita Saviuc’s aka The Purpose Fairies beautiful book 15 Things you should give up to be Happy – An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy Book Link.. I chose chapter four because it is about giving up and I am in the throes of giving up on my much loved workshop project. I am enquiring into what has got me to this point at the moment so what does society say about giving up on our dreams; down the trail we go:

1. If that dream is well entrenched in your psyche, whatever life throws at you won’t stop you, there will be no excuse that will get in the way.

9. Take these up as daily practices and you will find it harder and harder to give up.

10. Listen, that’s your heart speaking to you. It’s not into the excuses your mind comes up with from your past: High for This.

11. Nobody knows what you want except you, Fuck Yeah!!!

12. When I used to train for the 4 marathons I ran in a life a long time ago after the first four kilometres I ran I had this incredible urge to stop running. I did several times but overcame it which allowed me to get to the fitness level I needed to complete the 42 kilometres that a marathon is: Stronger.

13. Florence Nightingale is responsible for the founding of modern nursing, to overcome the male superiority belief that was prevalent in the 1800 and 1900’s Florence would have to definitely walked the talk of the above quote.

15. Defeat does not mean it’s all over, you can always get back up and continue towards your dream.

” All excuses are misalignment. Words like “difficult,” “risky,” “can’t,” “too weak,” ” too dumb” and “too complicated” do not apply to the divine mind. I urge you to reharmonize with energy that can do anything and everything, for that is your original nature.

Both of my English students have pulled the plug today so I get to write this blog a few hours earlier, I have decided to write an ode to my friend and anam cara Emeli Paulo. I met Emeli setting out chairs at a yoga and meditation event some years ago. Both Emeli and I are the sort of people who if they see something needs to be done we get in and do it. We introduced ourselves and I asked why she had come. Emeli said she was running a workshop that would address what stops you in your life from having what you want happen. I still have her card with Stop Running Away written on it. As always she delivered her promise.

I am reading Simon Sinek’s second book Leaders eat Last. If you don’t know who Simon is he’s the start with Why guy, here’s a link to his TED talk, the second most watched one in the history of TED ;How great Leaders inspire Action. Emeli had me stick to my Why, which I had been resisting for two and a half years: Love and Respect for All – Everyone Included.

Why, How, What, how has the world written about it over time, let’s have a look:

1. Finding it difficult to get out of bed? Have you why written on your dresser window and it will go away.

2. I’d lose that extra weight if I was motivated. Your only limit is You, Do it Now, If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you. Sounds like a Tony Robbins seminar in full flight. But if underneath it all, if you have not answered Why?, words spoken and written on parchment that will make no difference: No Excuses.

3. Google has let me down, when I put in Coach Hite it brought up coach hire in Melbourne, Australia where I live, so he must remain anonymous, but it’s such a beautiful quote it deserves more.

4. I always thought David Bowie was singing: Passion , turn to the left ilo Fashion, so here it is: Fashion.

5. As kids we run around all day like this, then something happens. Time to take it back.

6. In my youth I would boast I read Nietzsche to look cool, now he writes leadership and motivational quotes. His books are not quite so accessible: Roar.

7. My birthday, is 17th July, must admit can’t remember the other. I do know where, at the Darebin Intercultural Centre one, windy, rainy day during a Melbourne winter.

8. But Mummy, The unicorn was that big. Never forget your childhood unicorns: Dark Horse.

9. In the mirror. It’s You, Yay!! Out on the streets to kick some ass.

10. Here is the man himself, Simon Sinek, something we love called passion: beautiful words and ethos: Love is Action.

11. This is what finding your Why allows you in life. Get on board, the bus is leaving now.

12. My mentor Arion always says to have a vision and essence for any project you wish to fulfill in your life. It will be there to remind you when the going gets tough. Thanks brother , for that: You and Me.

13. This is why we spend our lives finding our Why, because of the things that never were that we are meant to create, little or large,

15. One smile at a total stranger is enough to do this. Don’t be withholding.

I just realised you may not know what an Anam cara is? Anam Cara is the old gaelic term for “soul friend.” anam meaning soul and cara meaning friend. Anam Ċara is the title of a 1997 bestseller on “Celtic spirituality”, the first publication by Irish author and then-priest John O’Donohue. According to O’Donohue, the Irish term anam cara (lit. “soul-friend”) originates in Irish monasticism, where it was applied to a monk’s spiritual advisor.

The book was an international bestseller and catapulted the author to public notability as an author and much sought-after speaker and teacher particularly in the United States. O’Donohue left the priesthood in 2000. As O’Donohue puts it: The term is greatly misconstrued to mean “soul mate”, anam meaning soul and cara meaning friend.

I forgot to bring a book today to take my subject from. No Gabby Bernstein, No Danielle LaPorte, no Marc and Angel Chernoff. What to do, I know, read the local paper, the Preston Leader. And there it was on the back page in the real estate section, the perfect subject, opportunity, not as the ad for the investment property suggested but where we hold opportunity to be in our lives.

Our self development company, Collective Potential used to work out of a co-working space that had a mural of a bird leaping off a cliff with the words, jump, and learn how to fly on the way down. It always stuck in my heart as to what opportunity offered oneself. So lets jump off that cliff and have a look at what people have said about it over time:

Marie Forleo, creator of the B-School operates her multi million dollar business from her laptop mainly. Taking that opportunity has transformed thousands of peoples lives. What simple thing could transform your life?

4. When is stops working for you, breathe in and start all over again, remembering what that mistake taught you: Begin Again.

5. Yes is the correct answer, then learn the rest as you go on an amazing journey.

6. I was gifted one of the great questions by a Landmark Education Forum leader. When I used to say I don’t know, he would say, then who should I ask. This gave me the opportunity to face that which I was unwilling by saying I don’t know: All to Well.

7. But what if?, I know I can’t do that, It’s all too hard, It won’t work out, add your favourites.

10. To me this is showing gratitude to what you have in life. I write what I am grateful each day in my Desire map planner. it amazes me what materialises because of this: Endless Possibilities.

11. The author of one of the most read books in the world, The Fountainhead. Ayn Rand points to how much easier it is to climb if you take the opportunities offered to you.

12. That looks like hard work, not for me. Bang, there goes another of the opportunities offered to you by the universe. Life is not always meant to be easy: Work.

13. Helen Keller proved to the world that deaf people could all learn to communicate and that they could survive in the hearing world. She also taught that deaf people are capable of doing things that hearing people can do. One of the most famous deaf people in history, she is an idol to many deaf people in the world.

14. Holding that parts of your life are separate from other parts is silly, you are always there whatever you call the day: Dreadlock Holiday.

15. I dance on the conscious dance floors of 5RHythms, Dancing Freedom and Mojo Dance. Where do you seize the opportunities in your life?

So the opportunity I would like ot take as I sign off is that I would love Oprah to read this and fall in love with my blogs.

Taken from the Deserving Chapter in Danielle LaPorte’s brilliant workbook, The Desire Map, the first page ends with Deserving and Worthiness – these are the notions that get to the pulse of our consciousness and self-esteem.

What do you believe you deserve in life,, and where did those beliefs come from, how old were you when you made these decisions? Lets go on a journey into what we deserve in our lives:

1. For those who thought atheism was a new invention, Robert Green “Bob” Ingersoll (August 11, 1833 – July 21, 1899) was an American lawyer, a Civil War veteran, political leader, and orator of the United States during the Golden Age of Free Thought, noted for his broad range of culture and his defense of agnosticism. He was nicknamed “The Great Agnostic“.

2. Remember, It’s their stuff not yours, go on with those deserving of your company: Bad Company.

3. They make you pick up and dispose of dog poo, don’t not do the same for your relationships.

4. Written 2,300 years ago, this quote on dignity still rings true in our instant gratification society, do not hand out honours in your life cheaply: Greatest Love of All.

5. Remember, if the door doesn’t open, it’s not meant for you, you deserve better.

6. You keep throwing yourself against that wall, because your head tells you too. It takes a while to hear your heart whispering, No darling, this one’s not for you:Wake Up.

7. Don’t give into behaviour that belittles a relationship, stay inside the strength of your character.

8. I think they left be out of this quote, I’m a proofreader by trade. There are theories that the gut is your second brain, I guess I kind of believe that: Trust Your Gut.

11. I am starting to lead Sacred Love workshops, the ability to tell those sacred stories that you keep for that special person, they may be good or bad, but you know what I am talking about.

12. We are deserving in every language and culture on the planet: Dan Balan.

13. You deserve this, rekindle that light within you.

14. Remember when handing the love out, the first place it need to exist is in the person giving it, Respect thyself: Respect.

15. And finally stencil this on your psyche and perhaps put it on the fridge, you deserve it.

You deserve: eye contact, smiles in the morning, food made with pure intention, clean drinking water – fresh air, Hello, Please, Thankyou, time to think about it, a chance to show what you are made of, a second chance, an education, health care, including dental, multiple orgasms, weekends off, eight hours of sleep, play before work, to change your mind, to say no, to say yes, to have your deepest needs met, to be seen and to be loved for who you really are. Thanks for this list, Danielle, it’s beautiful

I took part in an eldership ceremony yesterday, my friend Gabriella requested to be admitted into the tribe of elders in our community. We sang her into the room with the first verse of Amazing Grace, it was the only one we all knew. Then we gave her our own personal blessing and welcomed her into her new role.

It was extremely moving and I thought I would write about Eldership today as I am 63 since last Monday I have the right to do this as I hold myself as an elder too. I looked up Eldership quotes and it seems you have to be a Christian to become one out there in the big, wide , world. This was not how Gabby or I hold Eldership so the quotes for today come from a different space, leadership in one’s community.

Lets us journey down the Eldership path:

1. John Quincy Adams – July 11, 1767 – February 23, 1848) was an American statesman who served as a diplomat, United States Senator, member of the House of Representatives, and was the sixth President of the United States from 1825 to 1829. He was a member of the Federalist, Democratic-Republican, National Republican, and later the Anti-Masonic and Whig parties, thats a lot of parties.. He was the son of President John Adams and Abigail Adams and thus contributed to the formation of the Adams political family. He served as a leader for his whole life.

2. To me eldership does not get handed to you just because of your age. This statement from Gandhi is more to the point of why you do: Be the Change.

3. These are the wise things I hope that I pass on as an elder in my community.

4. As elders you will have made many mistakes in your life, the wisdom bit is how you tell the people you are advising to deal with them: Learning from your Mistakes.

5. And remember red stands out more than white, no drab fare for the elders of the world.

6. Winner of the Nobel Peace Prize, Albert lived to the ripe old age of 90. He was 77 when he won his Nobel Prize, an elder leading by example: Lead by Example.

7. They say hate will never solve anything. To me negativity is a form of hate. People do not come to their elders for negativity.

8. This reminds me of the two wolves story for some reason, that it depends on which story you are telling yourself that counts: Making Progress.

9. By the time we reach Eldership I’m sure we have covered all of these.

11. Essence is on there, The essence that you live through your life may grant you Eldership, and then again maybe not.

12. There are often times during our lives that our abilities seem to slip to a level that we later regret, they can become wise stories to tell as elders so others don’t make the same mistakes: Talking to Strangers.

13. Eldership is in pointing out that it’s hard to be somewhere else than where you are.

14. Sometimes Eldership is not words, it is just holding the space with silence allowing the others to work out what they need too: Some Eldership words from Alan.

15. Yes, even Elders are novices at that exact point of time, the new age they are.

Enjoy the little things in life because one day you will look back and realise they were the big things. I love the song from little things big things grow, such as Eldership.