Wednesday, 28 January 2009

Sitting on the beach. Watching the sea.The tide glides in and out.Back and forth over the sand.Rising up and back down the beach.Silence apart from waves rolling over and meeting the sand.

Such a beautiful vision.So vibrant and blue.The smell so distinguishing. The sight so amazing.Your senses come alive.

Inhaling the fresh sea breeze, that comes with the waves.Watching the movement across the shoreline.Closing your eyes, listening to every sound.Absolute Relaxation.Realising this happens across all shores,Each and every day.But yet the experience is still as breathtaking,As the first time you sat and observed the tide coming in.

Mesmerized by each and every movement.Fully allowing all senses to partake in this experience.

Watching the tide go back out.The sea taking little particles of sand and stones along.Then washing them back in and slowly rising up the beach.Looking into the distance, the sky meets the ocean.All you can see is blue.The sun is setting.

Wednesday, 21 January 2009

Thank you. This is a word that sometimes is used too much and loses the value of what it really means. A bit like sorry and please. The only difference being we are not wanting something or apologising for something, but letting someone know how thankful we are to them. We say thank you a considerable amount of times a day, (especially if you work in retail). But how often is it just a word, with no meaning? How nice does it feel when somebody says those two words and you know they truly mean it? It makes you smile, even if it is just a little.

When a person has that kind of glisten in their eyes, that they are genuinely grateful for what you have done and how you have helped them.There are lots of people I would like to thank. Those people who have always been there for me and helped me on a day to day basis, throughout life. Taught me the right way to go. Family. How often do we thank family for the little things they do each and every day? Well sometimes they might just want to hear that because it goes a long way. I know it puts a smile on my mum or dad’s face, if I look at them and say thank you. And why not? They generally are the people that raise us and are there from beginning to end. So why shouldn’t they get a thank you every now and then.

There’s also those new people who come into our lives and change it or somehow make it better. Friends, partners. They make us see a different outlook on life and sometimes make us see things, which we were not aware off. Your life is down to you and it is what you make of it. But other people can open up our eyes and take that mist away. Say Thank you to those people who make you realise, that you are worth more than you give yourself credit for and who take the time out to help you realise that for yourself.

I have one person to thank in particular, for the last ten months. For changing my outlook on life and giving me the confidence to progress in things I have always wanted to do. Being there to support me and definitely taking the cloud out of my eyes, when I feel like it’s going to rain forever. Putting a smile on my face and when I’m feeling down, being there to pick me back up again. And by telling him, it makes us both smile. And every time I sit down to write, I thank him, as I wouldn’t be sitting here, without his support.

Like I said in Round and Round we shouldn’t give to people who keep taking or don’t appreciate what we, as individuals, have to give. Saying Thank you, just builds that confidence in someone, that helping you is actually benefitting you. So have a think. Next time you say thank you, Is it out of courtesy or because you genuinely mean it? If it’s a family member or friend, then express it in a way that shows. Your eyes always show everything!! Remember that, Thank you can go a long way, without you even realising it.

This was just to show my appreciation for the people in my life, who make a difference, and who I thank, on a regular basis. To let them know, I am genuinely grateful for everything they do for me. Thank you.

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

You wake up in the morning and you have that feeling in your stomach. Like you have lost or are missing something. Normally you would get up and start thinking what it could be, but when you move you know exactly what it is you are missing. It’s that person that you have lost and never got the chance to say goodbye to. The pain cuts deep and it feels like it’s working its way out of your body, trying to break free. Your sleeping habits are upside down and the tears never stop. It hurts. It hurts so bad that you start praying, praying that you will get the magical power to turn the clocks back. You start to believe in things you never did before.But nothing can change what has happened and you have to come to terms with your loss. You have to have faith that they can still hear you and although you didn’t say those last words to them, they can hear them all now and will be there to listen every day. You cry so much sometimes that you can’t breathe. The thought of never having that person in your life again is just unthinkable, you can’t think about that right now. So you start thinking about all the things you should have said. All the times you sat at home doing nothing, instead of being with that person. When now, you would walk to the end of the earth and back again if it meant you could just see them again. Just for a minute. Just long enough to say “I love you. I miss you”.

But regret will deepen your grief and you won’t move forward. You just have to keep that thought, that they will be there watching over you every day. They will know exactly how you are feeling. It’s still hard. Every time you leave the house you think you see them and for a split second you forget that person is no longer there. No longer visibly with you, just mentally. Sometimes you can hear their voice. It’s the images you keep in your head, the memories that you have, these are what then, get you through. Just the thought of going to sleep, dreaming about them, makes you feel closer to them. You start your day thinking about what journey you went through in your dream together. You end the day wondering what tonight’s dream will be.

But it keeps you going. You keep looking forward, never back. You store the great memories you had and you won’t forget them. Sometimes the pain does still get intense and there are times when you need that person back in your life, more than anything. But you stay strong because deep down you know that nothing can bring that person back. And then you start thinking. You think about the people you do have in your life. Do you tell them you love them enough? Would you live in regret if one day you woke up and they were no longer there? You cannot live your lives in what if?? Past or present. But you can think about those around you, those people you love. Would they know how you feel if you weren’t there to tell them??

Grief and loss do get easier but only through your reactions and emotions. Living your life in regret will never help. You will find you are forever running from it and it won’t go away until you deal with it. How about trying to cut the regret side out and just being able to deal with your grief? I love my Nan and I know she loved me. Too much time was lived in regret I created, when she was no longer here. Instead of living in the memories, which we created together.

About Me

I love to write! Bottom line - this is where my passion lies. I am currently trying to break into freelance writing.
Please keep coming back and reading, leave comments, i love feedback!!
Contact me jenna-green@hotmail.com.
Look forward to hearing from you. Jen x