Hole

“There’s not much that pisses me off but people that die stupid deaths piss me off. And I can’t even tell ’em about it ’cause they’re dead. This is a song I wrote ’cause, apparently, heroin’s hip again. Cool.”

-Introduction from a live performance on 6 Mar 1998

There’s a hole in my soul,
And a hole in my head,
And a hole in my arm
Where I soak all my bread.
And I never can fill it,
It just seems so silly to try.

I tried fillin’ it up
With these things in my bed.
It got darker and deeper and wider instead.
Now there’s holes starin’ back at me,
Where once were daddy’s blue eyes.

Chorus:
And oh it’s a holey old world.
There’s no Alpha, no Omega.
There’s just a hole full of worlds,
Full of girls full of holes
Just like me. Just like me.

I was stuck on a cloud
Near the hole in the sky.
My wax wings were melting,
My tears had run dry,
When this God of a guy says,
“You know, there’s just nothing like dying.”

So I pictured myself with the angels
And I took to leaving myself,
Soaring higher than high.
Then I looked down and saw
This sweet, pitiful girl give up trying.

repeat chorus

Well my mother says Jesus can
Wipe off my sins where
The suffering ends and the healing begins.
But this heroin says
There’s a sweet Jesus laughing inside me.

So the hole opens up
And it sucks me right in.
Soon I’m vomiting colors and shedding
My skin, then I shit on the bed
As my own life begins to deny me.