How to be a comeback queen

We’ve seen celebs recover from all sorts of scandals and disasters – now you can too! Psychologist Meredith Fuller tells us how

HOW TO MAKE A COMEBACK . . . FROM A RED-FACED MOMENT

If you’ve just fallen off your bike in public or laughed so hard you let one rip in front of a hot guy, it may feel as if you’ll never be able to show your face anywhere again. But the biggest mistake you can make in an embarrassing situation is to run away, get angry or cry. “If you make a big drama it takes longer to go away,” Meredith says. So what do you do? “Take a deep breath to calm down, then smile and try to see the funny side. If you laugh, it relieves the tension and people can get over it quickly.” Okay, you’ll feel a bit lame but laughing is a million times better than crying and running to the loo.

WHAT TO SAY:

- “You’ve been watching the Amanda show, I’ll be here all week, folks”

- “Wow, talk about failing at life! Not my day.”

HOW TO MAKE A COMEBACK . . . WHEN YOU FAIL AT SCHOOL

“Failed maths. Feel sick. Must hide report card.” This might be your thought when you get a big fat F at school but hiding it from your parents is the worst thing you can do. “Walk straight in and say you want to talk about it,” Meredith advises. If you’re really worried about their reaction, there is a way to soften the blow. “Have a serious look on your face and say you have some bad news.” They’ll be thinking the worst (like you’ve been expelled or are pregnant) so when you tell them you’ve failed maths they’ll actually be slightly relieved. “It’s cheeky but it works.”

WHAT TO SAY:

*“My bad result has given me the motivation I need to apply myself.”

*“I want to do better but I’m not sure how, can you help me?”

HOW TO MAKE A COMEBACK . . . WHEN YOU’VE BEEN DUMPED

The only thing worse than being dumped is knowing that everyone knows about it and wondering if they’re talking about it. So how do you make everyone else move on so you can too? “Obviously you don’t want people to dwell on it but you shouldn’t pretend you’re perfectly fine either because then people will know you’re just being fake,” Meredith says. Your strategy for handling nosy classmates should be threefold: acknowledge the break-up; give them a (vague) reason; then change the subject.

WHAT TO SAY:

- “Yeah, it’s really sad but we decided to go our different ways.”

- “It’s been hard but I’ve just booked some dance lessons which I’m super-excited about!”

HOW TO MAKE A COMEBACK . . . WHEN EVERYONE’S TALKING ABOUT YOU

Let’s not sugar-coat it: when you’re caught up in a scandal such as being busted kissing your friend’s boyfriend, everyone will be talking about it. You can’t change that but you can change how you react and therefore how quickly it goes away. “What’s done is done,” Meredith says. “But if you act low-key about it, before you know it a new scandal will top yours and they’ll be talking about someone else.”

WHAT TO SAY:

- If you overhear someone talking about you: “Is there something you would like to say to me?”

- If someone confronts you about it: “I can accept why you see it like that but you don’t know the whole story.”

HOW TO MAKE A COMEBACK . . . WHEN YOU’RE IN TROUBLE WITH YOUR PARENTS

Being grounded and having your pocket money cut off are just a few ways your parents can make your life hell if they’re mad at you. So how do you get them to forgive you (and let you out of the house) asap? Meredith says the easiest way to earn forgiveness is to show them you understand why they’re angry. “Show them how devastated you are about the situation. It will remind them what it’s like to be young and can bring out their understanding.”

WHAT TO SAY:

- “What I did was really stupid and I feel so bad about it.”

- “I know I’ve broken your trust and that I’m going to have to earn it again.”

Meredith’s confidence tips to help you bounce back

- Walk with a slightly longer stride and smile to appear confident.

- Organise to walk into school with a friend rather than alone.

- Take deep breaths – it sounds obvious but it will calm you down.

- Remember, people like people who aren’t perfect – it makes you seem more approachable.