Books

Leave Work Early

Junk science on Page One

USA Today finds a new low

The lamestream media told you:

"Knock off from work a little early? Sure, it's good for you."

In a front page story, a reporter named Mathew Diebel tells us the "Australian National University" has found the perfect number of hours in a work week: 39. This is the research result of Huong Dinh, at the university's "research school of population health." According to the report, "Long hours erode a person's mental and physical health because it leaves less time to eat well and look after themselves properly," according to the lead researcher.

Using an olden investigative tool called a "calculator," the Uninvited Ombudsman finds a week has 168 hours. Subtracting Huong's 39-hour ideal, we find a person would be left with 129 hours weekly to eat, brush teeth, and do whatever else a person needs to do to maintain mental and physical health. That math was not included in the story.

The Uninvited Ombudsman notes however that:

There is no objective way to make Huong's ridiculous claim, for Australia, the U.S., The Cayman Islands, Bangladesh or anywhere. Giving it front page coverage, where news is supposed to appear, is further proof that USA Today is wasting paper. For comparison, the paper points out that Americans typically spend 47 hours a week working, with no support for the figure, and without pointing out that America is among the most highly desired destinations of productive people on the planet. By comparison, the writer says the French spend 35 hours a week working. So what. Whether the huge and growing muslim welfare population is included in that figure isn't mentioned.

The writer does say, with no apologies, that women need to work less, because they're women. Apparently, the diversity and equal opportunity quality czars at USA Today let that slip through uncensored. The public already knows that women and men compete separately at the Olympics, due to widely recognized differences. The National Football League could not be reached for comment on their own lack of diversity, work-hour schedules, or lack of racial and gender diversity, termed bullpucky in live-mic leakage.

About the Author

Freelance writer Alan Korwin is a founder and past president of the Arizona Book Publishing Association. With his wife Cheryl he operates Bloomfield Press, the largest producer and distributor of gun-law books in the country. Here writing as "The Uninvited Ombudsman," Alan covers the day's stories as they ought to read. Read more.