Sunday, January 29, 2006

it's a bit too late for me to indulge in wordiness. i just want to make some note about a few things today. this evening Vivian started to help herself put her arms through her sleeves, this morning, she started to display acts of shyness in a cute way and this afternoon, Owen started to suck on Vivian's nose. Not sure what to make of the last one but she apear to enjoy it too. who knows, i could probably find out for myself as he made me the offer also but i'm not up to it yet.

Now if i could keep with my resolution to go to bed early, that would be great

you can herass me any time you want, I wish i could blog more too. I realized that my kids were suffering from my computer based adiction. yes it's true and i'm going in withdrawal, i miss it, mostly chatting whith the ones who care to chat with me regularly. Please know that i have no intention of abandoning you. I didn't think my part time surfing/chatting was affecting my son as much but his behavior started to trouble me and i decided to look in the mirror to see where it came from.

yes! i'm a strong believer that if i don't like my kids behavior, it's because of something in the way i model, and if i want to change it, i have to change ME. I know there are part of it that is their own personality, or the way they respond to what's being dealt to them. but I believe i have a strong part to play in it. and to reenforce my belief, as soon as i stepped away from the computer, i saw some rewarding improvements. I love my kids and i want to give them the best i know how. I also don't want to live 18+ years with brats :p

but ahhh, i miss chatting hehe. yeah with you too Tina, and i feel an empty void inside from not being able to be more available. i wish i could be present all the time, but now i must limit myself to evenings after kids are in bed and try not too stay up too late in an attempt to catch up. speaking of catching up. it's kind of difficult when my best msn buddy in not on for the few hours i am :( Nancyyyyy!!!! WHere are youuuuuuu! (in a whining kind of voice)

*sigh* so today, i decided i was overdue for a trip to frenchies used clothing. and Nancy was right, there's quite a bit of girl cloth lately. i looted all 4 bins. everybody else were complaining there was nothing. but in fear of costing me $100 i made a big effort to return some of it to the bins. after all, 2 basket is a lot of cloth and i shouldn't pick too much stuff that will only fit in a few years hehe. sometime i can't resist though, it's just too cute or good quality. and now i go prepared, i mesure the kids, cause i find it impossible to rely on the size on the tag. and i bring my mesuring tape with me.

argh, i need a good relaxing potion now. my DH is listening to anoying stuff on his puter. one he just listen to was particularly stressing, and i even vocalized about it. and he said that was the point. Euh wait a minut, HONEY! are you trying to anoy me on purpose???

For the fact it was election day this monday, i'll say only one thing. glad the old party's not the one who won but for as long as we have the mentality that there can only be one of 2 parties elected, it's never gonna be a good thing. I hope and i pray that our leader don't start stepping on other contry's toes, like some other neo-cons.

i guess that's it for nowChantal, can't think of anything else at the moment.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Today is well you can see the date of the blog, its friday 13th. i should be afraid, no? after what happened earlier this week, maybe i should tremble in fear for doom.

aAahtchooOOuU!, fear my mad sneeze. after a bad week, what can happen at the end of it? aside from a bad cold, again, that makes me feel miserable. the day went by like normal, it's just me that don't feel normal.

Yesterday i got the phonecall i was anxious to get. the one that tells me the price of a second of inatention. well, maybe more then a second. I should've let someone in a better state of mind drive. tired, hungry, too much on my mind and just finished nursing so my mind can't realy focus clearly on anything. what a combination to think i'll be ok to drive. anyway, it will cost me $318. i could feel depressed to see all that money go away but oddly enough i'm happy, because i had a bit saved up, to buy stuff i wanted but didn't bother ordering it yet. so i have the money to pay for my own mistake. for a SAHM, i think it's quite empowering. i would've felt terrible if i wasn't able to cover it and DH had to find a way to pay that on top of all the bills. He already pay so much for my effort to find a resemblance of a health back.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Some sweet, some not so sweet. but it is ok, you can start all over again the next day. every days seem to look alike and melt into one an other. you'd think i'd remember exactly the day she cut her first tooth, or said mama. it's a great moment and it cheers my heart and make me greatfull for having 2 beautiful kids. but i don't quite remember when it happens. everything seem to happen so fast and i'm constantly in a state of sleep deprivation that make it hard to remember. that's one reason i try to take a lot of pictures and sometime little videos too. Here's my most recent one.

now a bit of venting. yesterday my mom tell me that she has to go see her brother to try to get a dent out of the corner of her bumper. it happened in the church parkinglot while she was in church. no one bothered to come forward and she has a $500 insurance deductible before the insurance pay for any dammage. so last night i was reminescing of the good old days when we used to have cromed metal pumpers. it was the real thing, you bump into an other bumper, no big deal, very little chance it will be visible. nowdays, you only look at a bumper cover and it get dammaged, what the use of bumpers? especialy that often time they have to be replaced and they are not cheap.

i guess i'm gonna find out the price of one very soon myself because comming out of my parking spot at the bulkbarn, i reared on a nice new black honda and made some nice horizontal scratches on its bumper. ironicaly, we were just arguing about our difficulty paying our bills and falling behind. so i had to make it worst by being responsible for an accident. Didn't help that both kids were hungry and fussy. but no less, i decided to find the owner and tell him the bad news. so i started with the pot and pan store and it didn't take 2 minutes to find the man who owned the honda. i'm very greatfull that he remained calm and was a kind type. we exchanged name and phone numbers and he said he'd get an estimate and call me back. i also gave him my insurance policy number but he seem to want to save me money and try to get it fixed without going through the insurances. he think it might cost around $125, i hope he's right. He was also kind enough to let me know he was going out of town for a few days so i wouldn't agonize by the phone endlessly. I already feel bad enough :/

am i the only one who can't run away from a parkinglot dent? i mean, my mom got hit at church, you'd figure it should be an honest person? and the time before that, she got sideswiped when she was parked in front of my house, we suspect a neibor, but that's just a suspicion, we didnt' go check their vehicule to see if they had a matching scratch pattern so we're not gonna dwell over it.

since i can't go back in time and undo my mistake, and there's no sense brewing those depressing anxiety causing thoughts over and over, i will try not to think about it too much untill i get more information about it. after all, it could've been much worst.

so a bit of heart warming stuff.... just before we left the house, DD was in her snow suite at the top of the staires, waiting to be loaded in the van and Owen was at the bottom of the staires, with his jacket and boots on when he decided to escalate the staires with a mentra. Ti Soeur (lil sister). he get to her, say hug, gives her a hug, say kisses, and gives her kisses, then say "j't'aime fort fort fort!" that was so cute! i tell hubby that Owen never said that to me like that. " j'taime fort fort fort". and Owen proceed to do an encore for his little sister hehe.

yesterday, he went to his bed on his own for his nap and bedtime. we used to struggle with him and now, even when he doesn't quite go on his own, he still goes with ease. wich is quite a change and a nice one at that. he's also getting good at putting his toys away, with a bit of help. but it's nice that he usualy do most of the work in collecting the scattered pieces. and he is starting to wistle. i was quite impress. Vivian is sitting on her own fairly well now and she's always so smily. I'm so greatfull to have them. oh did i already say that?

We almost lost Owen's glasses today at costco of all places. we coudln't quite remember if he had them comming in the store. but i noticed he took off his tuque and stuffed it on a shelf. DH picked up the tuque then i said, didnt' he have his glasses too? DH was gonna backtrack the whole store, when i asked Owen, where's your glasses? and he turned to the same shelf and pulled them from the wired rack. Good! we don't have to spend an hour searching and having to pay for new glasses after all, altho it was a close call. cause i almost didn't make a case of him not having his glasses on, cause he could've taken them off in the van or we could've forgotten them at home. and that's what i was willing to think at first. but i wanted to make sure.

for quite some time, i've been going to bed way too late, and although before christmass i had started working out, with a few bad cold, it got put on hold. yesterday i decided to get back on track, work out and go to bed early, so i did my workout around 8pm and stepped away from my computer around 9:30, took my shower and then knitted on my scarff for a while to relaxe before going to bed. it was nice and i wanted to stick to it, but not tonight. today was a bit much for my liking and i just want to vedge. wierd how 24h can bare more to write about then 10 days. i will try to get back to my resolution in a day or 2.