In an attempt to rekindle my love of sewing, I’ve been doing things that I used to do when I was first learning – making inspiration boards, listing new patterns I want, and shopping for new fabric. In this vein, I purchased a few things from Mood for my fall/winter wardrobe. They arrived last week, and in a love struck frenzy I unpacked and refolded them while making notes to my sewing plan. It occurred to me during this process that I needed to share how truly efficient (and beneficial) it is to sew your own clothes.

I spent $350 on 10 cuts of fabric, which for ease of explanation, we’ll say is $35 per garment. Add to that the cost of the pattern, plus a zipper, thread, and a needle, a custom garment that is EXACTLY what I want costs roughly $50. These are not poor quality fabrics either – they’re all well made and sourced wool tweeds or other wovens.

I think most people agree it’s cheaper to sew your own clothes, so the real issue becomes a matter of time. I’ll readily admit that learning to sew, like any other hobby, takes time to master. The more you do it the better you get. But I would argue that the time you spend learning to sew and creating your own clothes isn’t time lost – instead it’s an investment in your well-being, confidence and overall self-esteem. Unlike spending hours at the mall in dimly lit fitting rooms laboring over how something looks, the time spent learning to sew and creating your own clothes actually makes you happier and healthier.

When I was going through my divorce, my therapist told me that I was very fortunate to have a hobby that I indulged in regularly. She explained that right-brained activities (read: creative endeavors) are very healing for the brain and that my most prized hobby would serve me well as I healed over the next year. Her words could not have been more accurate – only after moving back to TN did I realize that sewing had ultimately saved my self-esteem and had a huge role in my recovery.

Now that I’m a proficient seamstress, creating a garment from a well-loved pattern only takes a few hours. If I’m starting a new pattern I take the time to make a test garment and make adjustments, but ultimately that saves me time in the long run. I wouldn’t trade these hours spent recharging in my sewing studio for anything. I also wouldn’t trade the comfort and confidence of wearing something that is completely “me.”

My sewing classes are designed to give you the most efficient introduction to sewing garments as humanly possible. I know that everyone’s busy. I know that fitting in one more thing on top of other things can be stressful. But I also know that unlike painting mugs or popping a pill, sewing has the power to transform not only your stress levels, but your confidence and self-esteem.

I can’t say enough about the transformative power of sewing. I have witnessed it in myself, and I’ve seen firsthand others become more calm and appreciative of their bodies. So, before you disregard the idea of making your own clothes based on time and resources, I urge you to take another look. As many seamstresses say, “Sewing is cheaper than therapy.”

*I want to preface this post, that I wrote weeks ago, by saying a big thank you to Donald Trump for bringing to light the bullshit women have been dealing with for decades. I’m so glad that a clown of his esteem has finally made this a national discussion.*

As luck would have it, I got 388 views on my post Let’s Talk About Boobies. HUGE shocker, right? I don’t want to call anyone out, but I’m willing to bet that people (ahem, men) who don’t even sew (ahem, men) read the post simply because I dared to include the word “boobies” in the title. And good on me. Get ready to see posts that include that word more often: “Boobalicious Sewing Tools,” “Top 3 Patterns to Show Off Your Boobs,” the list goes on.

I jest of course, as there were many women who chimed in on the discussion about how society has shaped our choices when it comes to covering up or showing off our bodies. Which leads me to an important point – female bodies are objectified every single second of every single day. And it’s not so subtle. I’ve heard the following over the years, and all from men:

“You have great tits.”

“Your legs look great.”

“You’ve got booty for days!”

While it can be a huge ego boost to know you are physically attractive to the opposite sex, relying on this reaction alone can be dangerous. I spent five years in a marriage to someone who didn’t seem attracted to me at all. If he was I certainly didn’t feel attractive. Due to other factors I won’t relay today, I spent the greater portion of that relationship feeling unattractive, unwanted, and completely neglected. And it’s amazing how much that lack of reinforcement did a number on my self-confidence.

We do a disservice to young women, and women in general, when we focus on her physical attributes alone. We have thoughts, ideas, humor, feelings, etc. These are the qualities people mention over time when our bodies begin to age and our physical beauty fades. It’s those qualities by which I want to be remembered – not my ample D cups.

So, how can you encourage and support positive body image (especially in our young women) rather than be a douche canoe? Simple. Compliment her ambition, smarts, creativity, sense of humor, wit, balls of steel, courage, kindness, empathy, passion, heart, smile, eyes, laugh, and talents. Keep your bullshit about food, diet, and clothing to yourself. Refrain from making overtly sexual comments (some women have experienced intense sexual trauma). And overall THINK before you speak. Newsflash: it’s not your job to value judge anyone.

Something amazing happens when you do something completely out of the ordinary that is, for your city, completely new: the naysayers come out of the woodwork. Those of us with vision and ideas have forever been told that our ideas won’t work, we shouldn’t pursue them, and we should spend our time on more practical pursuits. These warnings of wisdom usually come from those who have never taken a risk on anything, let alone been in the ring of innovation. Yet, we let their fears and opinions sink in. We spend time wondering and second guessing our dreams.

It’s super simple for someone who’s never taken a chance on their ideas to shit on yours. It takes no time at all to let your mind react to something that you don’t understand. In fact, we do this all the time. We judge music, food, and people out of ignorance alone.

When we tell people we’re creating a performing arts space that will support local makers but also offer coworking space, most people think it’s awesome. Most people understand the logic behind having a buiding that’s used for multiple things. It’s called “paying the bills.” But every once in awhile someone with limited vision looks at us like we’re circus performers. I watch their face scrunch in agony as they attempt to wrap their brain around something their imagination cannot fathom. And then I do what I’m now calling “the Burke pivot.”

Perhaps it’s my own ego or my unmoving arrogance that our project will be a success. Maybe it’s the countless conversations with actors, musicians, artists, freelancers, developers, designers, and others in Knoxville and larger cities that tells me we’re on to something. Or, at the end of the day, it could be my competitive nature wanting to prove naysayers wrong. Whatever it is, I refuse to be intimidated by others’ lack of vision, and I’ve taken to saying, “You’ll just have to see it to understand it.”

I’m tired of seeing artists, creatives, and innovative thinkers told to hush up. I’m tired of reading that we’re educating the creativity out of children. And I’m really fed up with the look of horror from folks who just don’t get it. So for now, I’m going to keep pursuing my crazy wacky ideas. I’m going to continue to support those who have dreams and goals beyond a typical office job. And I’m going to encourage artists and makers to keep creating beauty. The world needs our innovation, our voices, and our unyielding energy.