3.07.2013

temporary goodbye.

i guess it all started the day you left. i knew you had to leave. nothing was going to stop it, and nothing could have prevented it. i had been counting down to that moment for what felt like eons.

i approached your door hesitantly, with tears threatening to sting my eyes. as i rang the doorbell i could hear your heavy feet dragging closer through the glass door frame, until finally it opened.

you stood perfectly there in the doorframe; sleep still across your face. you were in those basketball shorts that i loved so much, and a striped v neck t-shirt. i couldn't get over the fact that your hair was messed up in all the right places. you were still mine for as long as i could hold on to you for.

you pulled me inside and brought me to the couch. you just held me in your arms not speaking, and for the moment i felt safe. i felt as if time froze and that nothing could take you away from me. it was perfect. i tried to burn the memory into my brain to save it for when i really needed it. now that i look back, the memory is a bit jagged at the edges. i can't quite recall the feel of your fingertips dusting my face, or what crooked smile you had plastered on. even though i recognize you in pictures, your face is a bit fuzzy in that burned memory.

as time regained its normal speed it was time for me to go. you looked at me with your dark glazed eyes and i knew it was goodbye. you pressed your lips to mine and it was perfect. your lips were made for mine. it was all too soon when you pulled away. your eyes couldn't quite reach mine as you muttered that you loved me.

i placed my heart in your hands and left. i didn't dare let you see my tears slip. you said our goodbye wouldn't be forever, and i know it won't. you'll come back when the time is right. i don't mind that your gone.