The repository of one hard-boiled egg from the south suburbs of Milwaukee, Wisconsin (and the occassional guest-blogger). The ramblings within may or may not offend, shock and awe you, but they are what I (or my guest-bloggers) think.

Today’s Outdoor Wire features recipes from the winners of the Alabama Wildlife Federation’s Wild Game Cook-Off. I don’t think it’s possible to express how jealous I am of the judges for that contest. I would do just about anything to get a seat on that panel. ANYTHING. (Srlsy, call me, Alabama folks. CALL ME.)

I figured this is the kind of audience that would appreciate the recipes, if for no other reason than to drool over them. Today I’ll feature the overall winner.

Elk Cuban Sandwiches

Cuban Bread:
Starter:
Three-quarter teaspoon of yeast
One-third cup of warm (90-100 deg) water
One-third cup of all purpose flour
Dissolve yeast in water till foamy – 5 minutes, then add flour and store in the fridge for 1 day (or up to 3 days)

Bread:
Four and a half teaspoons yeast (2 packets)
One and a half cups of warm water (90-100 deg)
Four tablespoons of lard – cut up (he used Crisco sticks for the cook off, but lard is better, of course)
One tablespoon sugar
One tablespoon sea salt
One-half batch of the Starter
Four to five cups of all purpose flour

Elk or Venison:

Take hind quarter roast and add dry rub of your preference and marinate overnight. Over hot fire, grill until medium rare or medium at the most. Slice thinly with a deli slicer if available.

Aran’s instructions for the bread follow: Dissolve the yeast in four table spoons of the water and leave for 5 minutes, then add sugar and salt. Add the cut lard, rest of the water and then the half batch of starter.

In his Kitchen Aid mixing bowl, he put on the dough hook attachment and start adding flour 1 cup at a time. On a setting of 4, I mix for 9 minutes. Add the flour until the dough firms up and is more clingy to the dough hook. The sides of the bowl should be clean. It usually takes almost 5 cups of flour.

Dump the dough out, clean the bowl and spray it with Pam. Then return the dough to the bowl, cover it and let it rise for 45 minutes. Lightly dust the clean counter with flour and lay the dough out.

“For the cook-off I made 200 small rolls,” Aran said. “Each batch made 30 rolls. I made a long log (2 foot) and cut 30 rolls out of it. Place 15 rolls on parchment paper, cover with parchment paper and a towel – Let it rise for an hour and fifteen minutes. Heat your oven to 350 degrees and cook for 18 minutes.

“For my family I make Cuban loaves, which you do the same way but divide the same dough into two equal loafs and let it rise for the same time. Before you bake it, soak two pieces of twine in water, lay one lengthwise on each loaf (end to end). After baking remove the twine and you will have a loaf worthy enough to sell on Calle Ocho in Miami.”

If you opt for the larger Cuban loaves, increase the oven time to 25 minutes at 350 degrees.

September 23, 2007

This week the Green Bay Packers won their 3rd consecutive game (all against teams that made the playoffs last year) today.

This from the prognisticator Steve: San Diego @ Green Bay (+6.5) – I’m going for broke here. You may like the points, you may want the points, and reputable bookies will give you the points (though most of them are only going to give you 5.5 to 6), BUT YOU’RE NOT GONNA NEED THEM! The receiving band is back together.

Steve, buddy. I hate to break this to you and the rest of the naysayers, but the Packers are much better than you think they are.

August 12, 2007

Revisions/extensions (5:02 pm 1/3/2008 – steveegg) – I don’t know how Curt got this post from Fred Dooley (who is also supporting Thompson) instead of my own Thompson endorsement, but as long as it’s on the list, I’ll take it)

In the swampy soup of hopefuls for the 2008 presidential election, there is a man with a funny name. (No, not that one.)

We’re thinking of the one named Fred (Thompson).

Say it out loud. Do it. Fred. Fred. In the South, Fray-ud.

Fur-red-duh.

It has the tonal quality of something being dropped on the floor, something heavy and damp-ish.

Waterlogged paper towel.

Fred.

The phonetics of the name seem integral to its image problem: On Urbandictionary.com, a “Fred” is defined as “a person who does stupid, annoying, or idiotic things” (Fred Flintstone, Fred Mertz). The best-case descriptors a Fred can hope for are terms like well-intentioned, predictable, benign (Fred Rogers).

There has never before been a major presidential candidate named Fred. There were two Alfreds, in 1928 and 1936. But Alfred, being all British and Batman-y, is not the same.

Then, out of almost nowhere, came Thompson, who is transcending the notion of Fred.

Some of the regular readers on No Runny Eggs may not know my name is not actually Real Debate, it is Fred. The Washington Post can kiss my fanny.

August 8, 2007

In the wake of Mr Steroid hitting his 756th home run two reactions stand out…

Bud Selig missed the game to go to a meeting with George Mitchell about steroids in baseball. Classic.

I thought by doing a prepared video Hank Aaron showed the ultimate amount of class. To me that gesture said I am man enough to congratulate you, but by not being there in person I do not acknowledge you. Aaron has always been a class act.

To those who wish to apply race into this. No one did not want Bonds to set this record because he is black. People dislike him because he is a cheater and more than anything just because he is a monumental jerk.

A SPANKOMETER, an orgasm tunnel and a giant wall of willies – roll up, roll up, for the world’s first-ever ‘sex theme park’, opening today in London. The adults-only Amora Academy of Sex and Relationships is an all-singing, all-dancing look at getting your leg over – and the rest.

It’s not quite Disney with dildos, but more The Tate Modern on Viagra.

It’s packed with state-of-the-art, interactive attractions, including a stripping masterclass, a voyeur’s peep wall and a video display about the ins and outs of oral sex.

Couples romp on screens all around you, in all sorts of scenarios – in flats, in threes and in cars.