baby, gravy, and the backstreet boys

To my dear blog followers and friends, hello! How in the world ARE you?!

First, I want to thank you for reading and following Foolish for Light.

So here’s the deal:

After 9 months of playing music for my tummy….

…..washing itsy baby socks and taking pictures of it because what else can you do when you are more excited than you’ve ever been??…..

…..dreaming with this guy about all the fun baby items in the world….

…..and kicking my feet back while letting everyone take care of the big pregnant lady…..

…..after 9 months of all that, by the grace of God, my husband and I somehow ended up with THIS:

If you aren’t smiling you clearly have no soul. ;)

I Foolishly hope and Foolishly anticipate you will continue to journey beside me as the blog goes off maternity leave.

(In Backstreet Boys style….the Blog. Is. Back. ALRIGHT!)

I am SO EXCITED to begin breathing life into Foolish for Light again. And, even though I paused from the blog, kinda without telling you, I am going to be rather bold and ask for the prodigal son experience here. Will you please take me back into your life? Your inbox? Your Facebook feed?

The blog is back, true! But– not quite the same. Hmmm? Because I am not quite the same.

I am a mother now so think gray hair, lots of wisdom, no makeup or sleep or sense of fashion. ;) Ouch…that sense of fashion one was too far. But seriously, I am different than when I penned my last post. God has refreshed my heart with a desire to be more real. Less polished. Less perfect.

Over Christmas I found myself articulating to my sister-in-law that in order to keep blogging with my part-time job and a new baby, I’m going to have to give up some of my perfectionistic tendencies.

Then, in a church meeting last week, my friend Greg mentioned how a person could start a blog with the intent of sharing the gospel and then, after some time, find that while her motives were good in the beginning, now she’s more focused on presentation. (He didn’t say she, he was speaking hypothetically but God was definitely speaking to me through him!) Now “she” wants to be careful with every little thing she shares on social media because she wants people to like her. The blog must look a certain way. She wants to gain followers. She wants to be admired.

Has the goal of my blogging become looking cool and clever? I have to admit in the past I’ve almost felt guilty for not getting the pictures or text of a post just right–I get a little paralyzed wanting to be perfect. So it makes a girl wonder, why am I doing the things that I do? So I can sit quietly at home and think, “Yeah, everyone thinks I’m great?”

It is a small but meaningful victory every time we affirm that our labor and efforts are for His pleasure, not a “great job!” ringing in our ears. Whether it’s a blog, volunteer work, paid work, or the activity we carry out as fathers, mothers, coworkers, and friends–what’s the why behind what we do?

A people-pleaser to the core, I learn time and time again that there is great FREEDOM when we give our best for God’s benefit, seeking only His approval (not people’s) and a right relationship with him. With our eyes fixed on benefitting Jesus, any consequences that end up benefitting ourselves are just gravy. Yummy, yummy, gluten-free gravy.

So, moving forward, my pictures might not be edited. Because this blog isn’t really about pictures.

Moving forward, the blog might have lapses of bad spelling because I’m busy, or operating on no sleep. This blog isn’t really about me looking suave and all educated and stuff.

You might notwon’t get perfect from me, but if you choose to hang in there with me on Foolish for Light, you will definitely get me. I don’t know if that’s good enough for you, but I smile remembering that somehow I am enough for God.

Here’s to keeping the main thing the main thing. And Lord, I love you. You know I do. This is and always has been for You.

You’re goofy, you’re not perfect, and you let us see that. That is one of the reasons I live you and your little blog so much. Well, and you are one of the kindest and most living people I’ve ever met. Did you know that When we run across a creative, quirky, super loving person one of us always says, “she must be the gingy of this place.” You inspired Grace long ago to be the Gingy of wherever she is. And she know that means just loving God and others for Him. So, you blog away and I’ll always subscribe to you, even if you aren’t perfect because that is one of the things we live about you the most.

I love this! Be yourself and God will be glorified! And never be ashamed of errors or imperfections because they are real and we need more real people in our lives. Embrace it all :) And keep sharing pictures of your beautiful little peanut :)