Sunday, September 26, 2010

A message to my body from my brain

Dear body,

I'm so sorry to have been treating you as a human garbage pail the last few weeks. I've fed you cakes, pizza, burgers, and various baked goods in massive quantities.

I can understand why you have reacted the way you have. The bloating, heart palpitations, gas, swollen feet, chest pain, and the overall jiggling of your parts are all normal reactions to ingesting crap food. The crap food is spewing excess insulin and causing widespread inflammation.

This excess insulin and inflammation can cause all sorts of nasty irreversible damage to you. Diabetes, Heart Disease and hypertension are just a few of the nasty diseases I am setting you up to get. This is already in your genes, so we have to work extra hard to keep these diseases at bay.

In addition, you are sending horribly hurtful messages to me. So many so, that I am having a terrible time trying to fight them off. These hurtful messages are making me think I am not good enough and a failure. I am therefore keeping us isolated from our friends. I would much prefer you send me messages of well being and kindness. Maybe even some of hope and forgiveness.

I see that my actions are causing these things to happen. We must remember that if the problem is not hunger, it cannot be solved with food.

Consider this my wake up call. Only I can stop this cycle of hurtful behavior. I will do my best to make better choices when it comes to what I feed you. I will keep track of what I feed you and I will ask for help when I find myself reaching for crap.

Looking forward to new messages being sent.

M's brain

P.S. You are no longer fitting into your clothes. This really must stop.

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When I'm excited, I like to add a "holy" to add effect. Hence the blog name. I originally used this blog to track my paleo pursuits and crossfit adventures as well as the many ups and downs of my efforts to get healthy. Then I used it to keep my friends and family posted on my cancer journey (diagnosed with Stage IIA Breast Cancer IDC, BRCA2, ER/PR+, HER2-). I got past that (and kicked cancer's ass), but my health and fitness suffered. I'd like to find the healthy Melinda again. Follow me on my journey?