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death

I haven’t always been the type of person to believe in miracles. But as of late, I am.

When I was in the Wyoming desert, I got a phone call I wasn’t expecting.

And from this day forward, Wyoming will forever be known to me as the place where I experienced heartache, grief, and a reunion all in one. Wyoming will always be bittersweet.

My grandfather went into surgery, and a part of me wanted to call and talk to him beforehand. But I didn’t, because I was afraid that since we hadn’t spoken for upwards of five years, that it would be “awkward.” Looking back, I realize how silly that sounds.

The next day, he left this earth.

I remember receiving a text from my aunt: “Give me a call when you have a chance.”

I remember that sinking feeling. She didn’t say it, but I already knew that it wasn’t good. Before I knew what was happening, I felt that emptiness.

My aunt and I hadn’t spoken for almost 10 years, but I called her and we cried on the phone together. And I’ve never felt so close yet so far away at the same time.

Then she asked a question I knew was coming, but didn’t want to hear: “Has your dad called you yet?”

My dad and I don’t have the best relationship. The love is there, but the closeness isn’t.

My aunt gave him the chance to reach out to me and tell me the news, but he didn’t. So I decided to reach out to him, just to make sure he was okay.

He didn’t answer when I called, but I wasn’t surprised. I left a voicemail, not expecting anything in return.

The next morning, he sent an email as though no time had passed at all. It had been nearly a year since we last spoke to each other, but somehow it didn’t feel like that at all.

We’ve been talking a few times a week since then.

Before this, I wholeheartedly believed we wouldn’t ever have a relationship. That the next time I heard from him, it would only be because something had happened.

In a way, I have to believe that in my grandfather’s passing, it was his dying wish to bring me and my dad back together. Because that’s exactly what happened.

With the loss of my grandfather, came the rebirth of our relationship. With his departure, I’m now in touch with my aunt and that other side of my family again.

In this tumultuous world we live in, I think it would be crazy to not believe in miracles of some sort.

So, that’s what I’m holding onto during this time of grief and longing.

What about you? Have you ever experienced a miracle of any kind? If you have, please share them below. I’m in the mood for miracles ❤️