Hello ladies! I'm new to the forum as I'm looking for support due to a recent loss. I'm having a hard time in general but especially with talking to friends and family about it. Like their emotions with my own are too much to bare right now. I should have been 10 wks today and I started bleeding Saturday. U/s shows a 6 weeker without cardiac mement. Of course doctors and midwives want to wait for more u/s and hcg but I know in my heart he/she is gone. A few weeks ago I just knew but tried to convince myself I was crazy. I hope to try again right away... I almost feel like that's the only way to recover from this. If full recovery is possible at all. I never imagined that this would be so hard. That I would feel so lost... confused... Broken. I know that I need to pull myself out of this rut for the sake of my 22 mo son but it's been really hard, especially when I'm the only one who is trying to accept it and move on rather than hold on to false hope. How long did the grieving process take for you ladies? Does the sorrow get better? Did you try again right away? Any success stories? Or did you wait a few cycles? TIA

so sorry for your loss, but glad you found your way here! Good luck! For me, the grieving process is different each time. Each for different reasons. It's kind of weird. Some are harder than others. You'll have another baby! And this will all be worth it!

@ememers
we are cycle buddies! Let's do this!! I was just noticing that I O next weekend! Already feeling encouraged!!! Now, if I could just get these old eggs on board!

Deeeeeeep breath, jumping back into the shark tank ladies, . It'll take me a minute to figure out what's going on with whom but I'm wishing the best for us all during these dog days of summer coming up. Wilhelmina, could u move me to Waiting To O please? Thanks so much. I'm in my TWW but I'm sure nothing came of it as nothing doing around fertile time. I'm ok with that though as my body seems to continue its journey back to normalcy. Dusties ladies .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips

Deeeeeeep breath, jumping back into the shark tank ladies, . It'll take me a minute to figure out what's going on with whom but I'm wishing the best for us all during these dog days of summer coming up. Wilhelmina, could u move me to Waiting To O please? Thanks so much. I'm in my TWW but I'm sure nothing came of it as nothing doing around fertile time. I'm ok with that though as my body seems to continue its journey back to normalcy. Dusties ladies .

Awe...welcome back to the game lady. So hard to dip the toe back into those waters. Before you know it, you've fallen under....
I hope you'll find some encouragement from my recent posts. It's made me feel all kinds of better. Even re possibly having to endure more before the payoff that is sure to come!! Have faith!

@ememers
- Hello! I'm so glad you feel better! So I wasn't wrong about the MTHFR. I wonder - how did you find out you had it? I'm asking because I'd like to be tested for it, if there is such a test … How did you get tested for it? I have no reason to suspect it, but I do have psychological issues (depression, horrible anxiety, etc.) that have started literally out of the blue about a year after my daughter's birth. What is the name of the vitamins you are taking (folate, etc.)?

@Momtolo
- I am so sorry for your loss! It took me about a month to start feeling semi ok again - a month of grief - and now, nearly two months down the road, I feel surprisingly well. It still hits me from time to time and I still do grieve, but it is so much better and somehow easier - now it's just the sadness without the anger and horrible pain. What helped me the most is starting to take really good care of myself. I improved my diet, started working out, got an acupuncture treatment (I still go there once a week) and tried focusing on being grateful for all the amazing people/things I already have: my daughter, my husband, my friends, my health, etc. I miscarried much later, my baby was 12 weeks and 2 days and I found out about its demise when I was in the 14th week of pregnancy, so I am waiting 3 months minimum before we TTC. Doctors usually recommend waiting at least for one normal cycle before trying. I think it's better to wait a little bit than to be super stressed out later on. But you do what you want to do - there are women that conceived right after a miscarriage before even having their first normal cycle and carried to term. Hugs to you! Take it very easy on yourself and take your time to grieve.

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Awe...welcome back to the game lady. So hard to dip the toe back into those waters. Before you know it, you've fallen under....,
I hope you'll find some encouragement from my recent posts. It's made me feel all kinds of better. Even re possibly having to endure more before the payoff that is sure to come!! Have faith!

Thank you rosie! And yes, I have indeed been encouraged by your recent posts. I truly appreciate you taking the time to relate your experiences as we seem to be having similar emotions . Oh ain't that the truth with the dipping of the toe becoming an all-consuming hurricane/flood combo .
@MsBe
: i giggle every time I think about your baby's surprise party . That's going to be so much fun! Happy Belated Born Day to your sweet boy and Birth Day to you .

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips

I don't know if it's the forum change being buggy or what but good grapes! That took forever to write and get random weirdness to stop happening . This tiny phone keyboard is also a factor mayhaps lol.

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing." ~ Emo Philips

@Momtolo
I'm sorry for your loss mama, but glad you found your way here. I know it hurts like hell now, but it does get better.
@rosie2727
I am loving all the positivity you are giving off these days!
@Wilhelmina
and
@mamacatsbaby
Thanks for the birthday wishes. I am trying to stay calm but I am already worn out and wish I could take a good long nap. In-laws arrive today and I still have the bathrooms to do, and cupcakes to make, and these elusive recital shoes to search for, and the sheep need to moved... At least no time to obsess over TTC. This is when babies are made right? While we are busy doing other things?

AFM: The spa stay went very well. DH and I even DTD! Wow, it took me nearly 2 months to get there … I did have to get a tad inebriated though, to get over the final hurdle, haha. We pretty much just went to various swimming/thermal pools, drank tea, ate fruit and also went to different saunas … did some self-massage, had a very nice dinner and then went to bed In the morning it was a nice breakfast, some more sauna, pool and then we picked DD up around lunchtime … She had a blast at her cousins' and didn't even want to go home. I could totally do this more often (too bad it cost us an arm and leg, haha).

I'm definitely going to the general practitioner next week and will try to ask about MTHFR testing. I really hope she agrees to do it. I'm so over having to talk folks into doing testing for me … grr. So, let's hope it works out and I can get some answers - or peace of mind.

I hope everything's ok with you, ladies … or at least better.

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Hello everyone!
@ememers
, I'm glad to hear your feeling yourself again! As for the acupuncture, the blanket is a really light metallic thing, but it's crinkly. It's usually no big deal (just sits on top of the needles, but sometimes it'll get weird & uncomfortable. I'm hoping now that it's warmer here that it's not necessary. And I have an appointment this week myself & I'm so excited! In the meantime, I dug up some TCM tea for anxiety that I had from a few months back & I need to remember to take it (I've only remembered once so far, which doesn't really do me much good!).

And, yes to oysters!! I found a good (BPA-free) canned version (smoked) for between times that I can eat them fresh in the half shell. Yum! I also enjoy fish roe when I can get it on sale. And thanks for the link!

Do you take the fermented CLO? I take the Nordic Naturals regular, but I'm contemplating trying the fermented one. If you know, should I try the gel or capsules?
@MsBe
, the tale end of the 3's were hard for us, too, sleep-wise. We weren't co-sleeping then, but it's a challenging age. For us, things got a ton better just a little bit after he turned 4. Hopefully you'll get more zzz's soon! That's too cute that he wanted a surprise party! I hope it's tons of fun. (And, yes, being too busy to worry about TTC seems like a very good thing!)

We are in the city, but luckily we've always had a little space for gardening. My seedlings all died so I am giving up for this year (I may do a little bit in some pots I have) but it was right around the time of the miscarriage & I was just feeling like everything was dying around me so I gave up on the seedlings & garden. Which is OK, I'd actually rather not rush into planning how to use our new yard space & maybe start with some winter greens in the fall.

Welcome,
@Momtolo
, and sorry for your recent loss. I also had a recent loss & this group has been wonderful. I know what you mean about the emotions of others. It's totally overwhelming. I was around some lovely family members today & it was so hard. I was teary & then just blah. I'm just 2 1/2 weeks out from my miscarriage, so this is all still very raw, but even from where I'm at, I can tell you it gets better. Give yourself the space you need now to grieve & go from there. But I'm with you, I'm eager to jump back in. Per my midwife's advice, I plan to give it at least one cycle, so we'll se where I'm at then. But I know everyone's different. And I honestly don't know where I'll be when my first "normal" cycle returns. Much healing & peace your way.

Hi,
@mamacatsbaby
. I'm sorry for your losses, but I hope the best for you!
@Wilhelmina
, YAY for DTD! And the spa sounds lovely, too! The relaxations must have done wonders for you, so I hope you can take some of that with you.

AFM, Today I was super emotional. It sucked. I really think I have some crazy hormone action going on still. I also realize that I've been having these mild sort of headaches since right before the miscarriage--They're painful but also give me terrible brain fog. It comes & goes but considering I noticed it just before the miscarriage I'm wondering if it's related. Anyone else get headaches around their miscarriage? I think I will try to take a HPT tomorrow & I really hope it's negative so that I have some reassurance that my body is close to back to normal. Have a good night ladies!

Way to go Wilhelmina! I know that hump is hard to get over sometimes (no pun intended....)

I got tested for MTHFR after my twins died. My MD (who is holistically-minded) ran a bunch of tests. MTHFR is associated with repeated miscarriage, which I have not experienced (knock on wood), so some people find out through blood testing after losses. It's just a blood test and it will tell you how many copies of the two main forms you carry (zero, one, or two). It doesn't immediately suggest a certain treatment, but it is good info to have. My doctor also tested for a bunch of other clotting disorders that would be problematic to have if you have MTHFR (can't remember the names, but the common clotting disorders) and checked my homocysteine levels. Good luck getting your doctor to agree to testing! My DH just had a check-up with a new doctor (actually a PA) and he had never heard of MTHFR so he wouldn't run the test. I want him to see someone else so he can get tested to, so we know what our son might have.

Way to go Wilhelmina! I know that hump is hard to get over sometimes (no pun intended....)

I got tested for MTHFR after my twins died. My MD (who is holistically-minded) ran a bunch of tests. MTHFR is associated with repeated miscarriage, which I have not experienced (knock on wood), so some people find out through blood testing after losses. It's just a blood test and it will tell you how many copies of the two main forms you carry (zero, one, or two). It doesn't immediately suggest a certain treatment, but it is good info to have. My doctor also tested for a bunch of other clotting disorders that would be problematic to have if you have MTHFR (can't remember the names, but the common clotting disorders) and checked my homocysteine levels. Good luck getting your doctor to agree to testing! My DH just had a check-up with a new doctor (actually a PA) and he had never heard of MTHFR so he wouldn't run the test. I want him to see someone else so he can get tested to, so we know what our son might have.

Thank you for your answer! I really hope they won't give me hard time about the testing … here in Sweden it's hard to request things 'out of the ordinary,' because they are trying to keep the cost of healthcare down and unless you have a legitimate reason, they won't test for anything. I can also try to call my new gynecologist and ask her about that sort of testing.

I can't believe there are doctors that haven't heard of MTHFR - that is just outrageous.

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Hello everyone!
@ememers
, I'm glad to hear your feeling yourself again! As for the acupuncture, the blanket is a really light metallic thing, but it's crinkly. It's usually no big deal (just sits on top of the needles, but sometimes it'll get weird & uncomfortable. I'm hoping now that it's warmer here that it's not necessary. And I have an appointment this week myself & I'm so excited! In the meantime, I dug up some TCM tea for anxiety that I had from a few months back & I need to remember to take it (I've only remembered once so far, which doesn't really do me much good!).

And, yes to oysters!! I found a good (BPA-free) canned version (smoked) for between times that I can eat them fresh in the half shell. Yum! I also enjoy fish roe when I can get it on sale. And thanks for the link!

Do you take the fermented CLO? I take the Nordic Naturals regular, but I'm contemplating trying the fermented one. If you know, should I try the gel or capsules?
@MsBe
, the tale end of the 3's were hard for us, too, sleep-wise. We weren't co-sleeping then, but it's a challenging age. For us, things got a ton better just a little bit after he turned 4. Hopefully you'll get more zzz's soon! That's too cute that he wanted a surprise party! I hope it's tons of fun. (And, yes, being too busy to worry about TTC seems like a very good thing!)

We are in the city, but luckily we've always had a little space for gardening. My seedlings all died so I am giving up for this year (I may do a little bit in some pots I have) but it was right around the time of the miscarriage & I was just feeling like everything was dying around me so I gave up on the seedlings & garden. Which is OK, I'd actually rather not rush into planning how to use our new yard space & maybe start with some winter greens in the fall.

Welcome,
@Momtolo
, and sorry for your recent loss. I also had a recent loss & this group has been wonderful. I know what you mean about the emotions of others. It's totally overwhelming. I was around some lovely family members today & it was so hard. I was teary & then just blah. I'm just 2 1/2 weeks out from my miscarriage, so this is all still very raw, but even from where I'm at, I can tell you it gets better. Give yourself the space you need now to grieve & go from there. But I'm with you, I'm eager to jump back in. Per my midwife's advice, I plan to give it at least one cycle, so we'll se where I'm at then. But I know everyone's different. And I honestly don't know where I'll be when my first "normal" cycle returns. Much healing & peace your way.

Hi,
@mamacatsbaby
. I'm sorry for your losses, but I hope the best for you!
@Wilhelmina
, YAY for DTD! And the spa sounds lovely, too! The relaxations must have done wonders for you, so I hope you can take some of that with you.

AFM, Today I was super emotional. It sucked. I really think I have some crazy hormone action going on still. I also realize that I've been having these mild sort of headaches since right before the miscarriage--They're painful but also give me terrible brain fog. It comes & goes but considering I noticed it just before the miscarriage I'm wondering if it's related. Anyone else get headaches around their miscarriage? I think I will try to take a HPT tomorrow & I really hope it's negative so that I have some reassurance that my body is close to back to normal. Have a good night ladies!

OK, this is weird... I posted this last night & can't see it on Tapatalk? So far this new format is .

In other news, this headache thing is killing me! And I took the HPT this morning & there was a faint, faint line (almost looked like the lightest of pink but more indented?). I guess that's good?? I'll try again mid-week to see if it's a solid negative. It feels so weird to be hoping for a negative.

@Wilhelmina
. No check-up scheduled yet. But definitely will schedule one if HPT isn't negative in a week. I think yesterday was my 1st day with absolutely no spotting. My temps are down (yes... I've started charting...). I'm (maybe naively) convinced my hormones are settling (given the pattern of headaches & my emotions).

So I have heard this MTHFR thing mentioned soooooo often now! Not just related to TTC either! It sounds like tons of women have it. Wonder if I should be tested?!?!

@Wilhelmina
The spa trip sounded wonderful! And so happy to hear that you and DH reconnected!! That has got to be a weight lifted!

@MsBe
I always thought 3's were worse than 2! Whoever created the term "terrible two's" clearly had not entered the 3's stage yet.

@t2009
I don't recall headaches around mc, but all my mc's are so early. I'm sure it has to do with hormone fluctuations. Hopefully that will go away so for you. I've had two times in my life that I had super faint BFPs that almost looked like indents....those betas were 9 and 4.4 so I think it sounds like you're getting close to zero!

AFM: I got my blood work results back and they said I still seem to have plenty of ovarian reserve and my ovaries seem to be functioning ok! That was a relief!! I'm set to O Sun or Monday...so I better start planning my weekend of seduction!

@rosie2727
, thanks much--those numbers are a useful benchmark & make me feel better about where I am right now.

I'm so glad your tests all came back a-ok! Onward & hopefully this is your weekend!!

I also wonder about getting tested for the MTHFR since my doc suspected it at some point. Have you had trouble with b12 levels? Or absorbing b12 despite supplementation? I think that's what sparked my doc's suspicions. Couldn't hurt to ask your doc in any case.

I'm also wondering about testing in general. I don't want to go overboard but also curious about my progesterone levels. I have an acupuncture appointment tomorrow so I'll mention this all to her.

Mama to my little busy bee.

Last edited by t2009; 06-09-2014 at 10:15 AM.
Reason: fixed a sentence

@t2009
Yay for the spotting being over. That is major. I didn't use any HPT's, I just went to a post-d&c check up some 3.5 weeks after and they made me pee on a stick. It was so nice to hear from them that 'everything looks great' and that there was evidence of ovulation …

AFM: I, shockingly, got an appointment with another gynecologist tomorrow! I thought it was going to take months before I'd get an appointment with them (it tends to take 2-3 months) and I was ready to beg on the phone. I was so shocked when the nurse told me they just had someone cancel their appointment! Yippee! According to my former midwife, that group of gynecologists are very willing to do further testing and I'm hoping to ask them to do the MTHFR test, if they can do that … I really hope I don't have to go to a general practitioner for it, I guess I'll find out tomorrow.

I have one more awesome piece of news: My TCM practitioner (acupuncture) gave me green light to start trying during my next cycle! He said everything looked great from his standpoint! I was so happy to hear that!

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

I stocked up on wine and unpasteurized cheese while grocery shopping today, living it up while I'm not pregnant.

It can be hard to convince doctors to test for MTHFR here in the US, too. They have to have a reason for it, and that means they have to have a code to use for the insurance company to prove they had reasonable cause to test for it. You need a good doctor who is willing to do what it takes to get your stuff covered, or you can pay for testing out of pocket.

I also take vitamin D, lots of probiotics (in pill form and via homemade fermented foods), fermented cod liver oil w/ butter oil (from Green Pastures, I take the chocolate flavor and it's not too bad). People with MTHFR are often told to take a low dose asprin per day, but I have a sensitive gut as it is so I don't do that.

I don't have all my health issues figured out, but I feel like I'm on the right track for the first time in a while. Now if only I could do acupuncture every day, I think I might be super human.

So, I just got home from the doctor's and have things to report. The doctor agreed to do blood clotting/homocysteine test, but had to effectively 'lie' for me to even get the test. Which makes me feel bad. Almost guilty. It's a super expensive test that is not done routinely and one has to have repeated losses to even get it … Now I'm feeling bad about it. My husband told me that I'm being responsible and that it's good I'm getting this test even though I haven't had multiple losses. I know he's right, but I'm one of those folks that suffer from overactive conscience and I feel bad about everything …

The test results will take 2-3 weeks.

He, however, couldn't do the MTHFR testing as there is not sufficient reason to do so and for this test he couldn't help me as it goes through peer-review process, etc.

So yes, I think I've now officially done all the tests that I could humanly/possibly get. It feels kind of good. To me, the ultimate control freak.

In other news, I don't think I've ovulated this cycle, which is a little disconcerting considering it's never happened to me before - I always get the ovulation pain and lots of mucus plus insanely elevated sex-drive for about 2-3 days around the ovulation time - well, except for this month. My acupuncturist told me it's possible that I just haven't noticed. I don't know … I'm trying not to think about it. After all, it's not like we were TTC anyway, so theoretically it doesn't matter. I just really hope it's not a sign of trouble.

Anyone else here had (possibly) anovulatory cycle after a loss? I'm on CD 26, methinks and I'm expecting my period between Fri-Mon.

I'm sorry for a totally self-centered post, but it had to get out, haha. I hope everyone is doing well!

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@Wilhelmina
, that's awesome both that you got the tests done & that your TCM practitioner gave you the green light! I wouldn't worry about getting the tests--There are so many factors that go into ordering tests--Who knows about other tests where it was the doctor's call & it wasn't necessary. It's not like your doctor thought these were unnecessary--otherwise it sounds like he/she would have just told you you couldn't have them done. You've just advocated for yourself & that is awesome!!

Also, I wouldn't worry too much about a possibly anovulatory cycle. First, if you were not even feeling up to DTD, I think it really is possible that you missed the signs. Plus, you mentioned up-thread that at your post-D&C check-up they told you there was signs of ovulation. Take heart that your body is gearing up!

So not that you've gotten all the tests can I ask what exactly you've gotten? If you did progesterone, did you do the multi-day test? I'm trying to figure out if I'm going to go see my doctor. I kind of don't like my OB so I'd rather just go to my GP, but I suppose it's impossible to avoid the specialist. I may get a referral to someone new.

Can't wait to hear your results & hoping it's all good!
@ememers
, yay for raw cheese!! I just bought a bunch as well. I'm also going to take the plunge & try raw milk next month (have to order 1 month in advance). I don't know if it's something I'd stick with if I get pregnant but I have a friend who's been giving it to her kids for years from the same farm. I'm really craving milk, so I'm just listening to all my (reasonable & healthy) cravings right now. That included smoked oysters at lunch yesterday... My poor officemate!

I think when I'm out of my regular CLO I'll try the FCLO. Have you noticed a big difference in switching to the FCLO?

I hear you about figuring out the food/nutrition stuff. Some days I feel so good & confident that I'm doing right by my body & other days... Well, on those days I wonder what's wrong with my body & then I just live off of coffee, chocolate & wine... I'm also working on being more forgiving of myself.

Speaking of food, I'm once again trying to wean myself off of coffee. I'm enjoying a 1/2 regular-1/2 decaf right now. I just like the taste, but I'd rather be at a place where I don't have to have it every morning. Especially because I'm going to acupuncture & I'm sure I'll come home with yucky-TCM tea & my practitioner will tell me to not take it if I'm drinking coffee.

@t2009
I feel better about the test now … I deserve it and the future pregnancy deserves it. I have to look out for myself first and foremost … I'm saying 'stop' to all my guilty feelings.

For me, ovulation is very obvious every month - lots of pain and CM. It's possible the signs became super mild and there was no mucous … who knows. I'm going to enter a new cycle soon, so worrying about Oing or not is really pointless. (Trying to make myself believe that, haha.)

About the tests - I just got my thyroid and prolactin (something produced by the brain that governs hormone production) tested and it all came out fine. If it weren't ok, I guess then we'd move on to some more advanced hormonal testing. The docs here really are not into bunch of tests after 'just' one loss and especially if one already has a child and is with the same partner, so I think I just have to be happy with what I got … oh well. What are you thinking of getting test-wise?

I'm also trying to get off coffee, but it's impossible as I love the taste and the 'kick' it gives me - I need it once a day. Fortunately, I drink only one cup per day, so I'm hoping it's not too bad. My acupuncturist told me it's ok to drink coffee, only 'not too much,' in his words. Whatever that means He sure is a man of few words … very … zen. I found a pretty good way of taking care of the coffee cravings - either green tea or grain-coffee (there's no actual coffee or caffeine in it, it's just grains and it tastes a liiiiitle like coffee … it's about the ritual of making that cup, putting sugar and milk in it, etc.) In Britain they have one called 'Barley Cup'. I drink mostly german kinds. I remember it from my childhood in the Czech Republic, when my great-grandma and granda used to drink it - and sometimes made some for me.

I'm really getting into nutrition now. I by tons of spinach and try to eat at least 50g per day (I buy this 100g box of fresh spinach and eat about one half per day). Most of it goes into my daily smoothie. I'm also thinking of eating more vegetarian stuff again and bringing my meat-consumption down.

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

It's been 2 months today since the day I found out the baby's heart stopped beating … I just recalled that horrible experience from hell when I lay on the ultrasound technician's bed … the whole world crashing down …

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

So, I got my period a few days too early and I'm also pretty sure I've just had my first ever anovulatory cycle … I'm feeling quite bad about it, a little scared that it might mean something bad … It's the old over-anxious over-analyzing me again.

This is also one of the shortest cycles I've ever had (I haven't been exactly good at keeping track of them, but I know that most of my cycles are between 29-32 days long) - 27 days.

Have you ladies had anovulatory cycles after loss/d&c? Have you discussed it with your gynecologist/doctor? Do you have any info for me that would calm me down a little? I'm not exactly freaking out, but I would love to hear something good … Plus I just had some coffee at a birthday mini-party, so I'm all worked up by the caffeine …

Anyway, so it's CD1 for me and even though I've been given green light to TTC, I'm not so sure I will this cycle … it would be nice to have an April baby, but I've grown to hate number 4 thanks to my loss (14.4.2014), so maybe it'd be better to shoot for a May baby instead (wishful thinking here). However, I am going to put myself under 'waiting to O' just to shake things up a bit around here, haha.

I'm sorry I'm being so self-centered here, I just have so little headspace for anything else right now … it's a whirlwind of emotions here in my reality right now. I hope you are all doing well!

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

So, I got my period a few days too early and I'm also pretty sure I've just had my first ever anovulatory cycle … I'm feeling quite bad about it, a little scared that it might mean something bad … It's the old over-anxious over-analyzing me again.

This is also one of the shortest cycles I've ever had (I haven't been exactly good at keeping track of them, but I know that most of my cycles are between 29-32 days long) - 27 days.

Have you ladies had anovulatory cycles after loss/d&c? Have you discussed it with your gynecologist/doctor? Do you have any info for me that would calm me down a little? I'm not exactly freaking out, but I would love to hear something good … Plus I just had some coffee at a birthday mini-party, so I'm all worked up by the caffeine …

Anyway, so it's CD1 for me and even though I've been given green light to TTC, I'm not so sure I will this cycle … it would be nice to have an April baby, but I've grown to hate number 4 thanks to my loss (14.4.2014), so maybe it'd be better to shoot for a May baby instead (wishful thinking here). However, I am going to put myself under 'waiting to O' just to shake things up a bit around here, haha.

I'm sorry I'm being so self-centered here, I just have so little headspace for anything else right now … it's a whirlwind of emotions here in my reality right now. I hope you are all doing well!

I've always been told that anything within a week of your usual is still considered normal. AND it's totally normal for a woman to have one anovulatory cycle per year. I'd be happy it didn't happen during a month in which I was TTC. I'm sure it doesn't mean there is an impending problem....

Also, if you get pg this cycle, I think you'll be due in March, not April....I'm totally trying to convince you to jump back in the game. Lol!

Oh, and after my chem in Oct, I had a short cycle the following month, but all has returned to normal since...

@rosie2727
Thank you so much for replying! How are you? What CD are you on? Yeah, I shouldn't worry and I'm trying, haha. I am thinking about calling my gynecologist about it though … just to see what she has to say about it. I'm also going to talk to my acupuncturist about it on Monday. I am such a huge worry wart - you'll see, haha. That's one of the reasons why I'm online on forums so much - I don't want to bother with it folks around me in 'real life' and my husband, so instead I bother folks online, haha. I tend to ovulate late in my cycle - usually CD 20+ - so I think even if I did TTC this cycle, I wouldn't actually ovulate until early July … which I think would put me at an early April EDD. Agh, who cares … I *still* think I'll wait one more cycle … I really wish the next one is 'normal' again. We'll see how I feel. On one hand I'm super scared wondering if I even have it in me to go through a pregnancy again, but on the other hand, there's tons and tons of babies being born around my area, which doesn't help as my hormones are raging and the biological clock went from ticking to beating me over the head with its hands!

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

@rosie2727
Thank you so much for replying! How are you? What CD are you on? Yeah, I shouldn't worry and I'm trying, haha. I am thinking about calling my gynecologist about it though … just to see what she has to say about it. I'm also going to talk to my acupuncturist about it on Monday. I am such a huge worry wart - you'll see, haha. That's one of the reasons why I'm online on forums so much - I don't want to bother with it folks around me in 'real life' and my husband, so instead I bother folks online, haha. I tend to ovulate late in my cycle - usually CD 20+ - so I think even if I did TTC this cycle, I wouldn't actually ovulate until early July … which I think would put me at an early April EDD. Agh, who cares … I *still* think I'll wait one more cycle … I really wish the next one is 'normal' again. We'll see how I feel. On one hand I'm super scared wondering if I even have it in me to go through a pregnancy again, but on the other hand, there's tons and tons of babies being born around my area, which doesn't help as my hormones are raging and the biological clock went from ticking to beating me over the head with its hands!

Do you have living children, or was this your first pregnancy?

Lots and lots of women have mc's their first time out of the gate. And then go on to have perfectly normal pregnancies. Chances are it won't happen again. So try not to worry too much. But I'm the same way. If/when I get my next BFP I'll be a complete mess until I'm thru beta hell and have a heartbeat!!

Lots and lots of women have mc's their first time out of the gate. And then go on to have perfectly normal pregnancies. Chances are it won't happen again. So try not to worry too much. But I'm the same way. If/when I get my next BFP I'll be a complete mess until I'm thru beta hell and have a heartbeat!!

I have a daughter that just turned 3 years old. This was my second pregnancy and the problem is that the baby died in the 13th week of gestation so I already heard a heartbeat and everything looked great … no signs of trouble So, I will most likely be a total mess until I am actually holding the living and breathing suckling baby in my arms … I can't even imagine how it must be for women that had even later losses … I'm probably going to have to be in therapy just to survive and meditate several times a day … Yeah, I'm not a very 'positive thinker,' thanks to my horrible childhood, bad upbringing and now this. More woe is me, anyone?

Proud mommy to our stellar Stella To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.(3/2011). Cautiously expecting our To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. in April 2015 after loosing a sweet little angel in April 2014.To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 10 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

Hello Mamas! Sorry I have been silent for a bit, it was busy, busy, busy around here these past ten days. The b-day party was a success; DS was totally surprised and had a great time. He has some anxiety over growing up- at times he will just spontaneously burst into tears and tell me he doesn't want to get bigger or older- and lately he has been showing a resurgence in interest in my "nurses", always wanting to put his hand or his head on them. I've told him that nursing is only for babies and he is getting to be a little boy now, but I am starting to feel guilty about pressuring him to wean and wondering if it was too early for him and I should've held out a little longer. But I was so done. My juice cleanse went well. The second day was the hardest with a bit of brain fog and sluggishness, but on day 3 I felt great and I will do it again after AF next month (if I am not pregnant by then). I even ran on two of the days and felt strong and steady. I've decided to go ahead with planning to do the half-marathon Labor Day weekend. My sister gave me a 12 week training plan and even though I skipped a day this week due to incessant rain, I did get in 11 of the 13 miles scheduled for this week (7.5 on the road and 3.5 on the treadmill) as well as 4 or 5 yoga sessions including my kick-ass class at the Y. All in all feeling good. I started getting some EW around CD10, so I expect to O in the next few days, although I am not feeling any kind of rush, especially with this plan to run all summer. I'd really like to get pregnant in the fall, a BFP in October or November would suit me just fine, but I'm also not planning on taking any time off from casually TTC these next few months. Best to get all the chances in I can.
@Wilhelmina
- I'm glad the spa day did the trick and you and DH are "going all the way" again. Great news that your acupuncturist has given you the green light, and that you are getting some of the testing done that you want. That 2 mo. milestone was a crashing point for me, that's when I started feeling a little cuckoo and had to put on the brakes for my own sanity, and I totally know your pain and frustration over the timing of your loss. My m/c was also in the 12th week (12w6d) and I felt so angry and cheated about seeing that HB at the 8 week ultrasound. I thought it was so unfair to have gone the whole crappy first trimester, and I was getting so excited about moving into that glorious 2nd phase. But loss at any stage is horrible and heartbreaking, and I thank my lucky stars it wasn't any later. I wouldn't worry one bit about the possibly anovulatory cycle. From what I've read it is really, really common following loss or full-term pregnancy. You have undoubtably had an anovulatory cycle before but was unaware, because let's face it, you have probably not had the hyper focus on your body that you have right now all your menstruating life. Anovulation is super common in teenagers as their body gets used to ovulating and it is perfectly normal (and expected) for women of child-bearing age to have one or two a year for no discernible reason. I wouldn't (and don't) let it become a cause for concern unless it starts to become more frequent. Our bodies are crazy (and Miraculous!) things. Trust in the wisdom of yours!
@t2009
- I know that feeling of everything dying around you. I got quite a bit of that last year too. My mother was undergoing a difficult treatment last year and it was painful watching my normally vibrant and active Mom struggle just to walk to the bathroom. (She has since made a full recovery.) And then we watched half our chicken flock get massacred by the new puppy and a fox I actually caught sight of in the barnyard in broad daylight. My garden was a mess last year. Partly because I was running my Mom to the hospital (45min each way) 3 or 4 times a week, and partly because it felt like the gloom of death was all around me and I couldn't bring any positive focus to my work out there. The winter greens sound like a great idea. It took a long time for my numbers to go down after my m/c. Even though it was spontaneous and complete, my body seemed to have a hard time gearing down. My OB office had me come in for blood draws to until it dropped to 9, and then the next week my period came, right on time. I'm sure things will go fine for you. I am so sorry to hear about the headaches. Sounds awful. Hope they clear up soon. We do raw milk; although I don't drink much (I never liked it, even as a kid) I do use it to make my own yogurt and sometimes cheese . I say give in to any and all cravings (within reason) and be compassionate with yourself. If you really feel like you have to give up coffee, I'd echo Wilhelmina on checking out some of the grain alternatives. We like Postum.
@ememers
- Thanks for sharing all your knowledge on the MTHFR. I do love how much more educated I've grown on this journey. Yes, yes, yes! I love that you are living it up with the wine and cheese! Plenty of time to deny ourselves when we are pregnant again.
@rosie2727
- Great news that all is good on the ovaries front! Hope your weekend of seduction was good fun.
@lollie2357
@mamacatsbaby
@Momtolo
and anyone else who might be lurking

DH, DS, and I are heading up to Maine for the week. I am super excited as I haven't been in a few years (the last time was when my Mom & I took DS when he was 7-8 weeks old) and I've never been with DH. I can't wait to show him all my old stomping grounds, where I went to school, where I grew up, the crazy cold ocean. We are camping out by a lake in the woods so I will be incommunicado for the week. But I'll be thinking of you ladies