Daily Jumble: Britney-Free Edition

• Everyone’s a consultant: “[Y]ou’ve got to stop – excuse me for being blunt – you’ve got to stop getting involved in the way people are fighting each other, chewing you up a little more.” [AP]

• I’m shocked, shocked: “The host committees of 2008’s biggest political gatherings are soliciting corporations, wealthy individuals and others with a lot at stake in government decisions for seven-figure payments. In exchange, the givers receive all sorts of goodies, including access to lawmakers and other politicians.” To put it another way: Facetime with Mayor Hickenlooper: 1$ million. “Golfing with Republican leadership”: $5 million. Ensuring that voters remain incidental to political process: Priceless. [WP]

• Karl Rove, paragon of modesty: “I have an employment record that I think would be attractive to any employer,” he said. “I’ve worked in an industrial kitchen in a hospital; I’ve waited tables; I’ve worked in convenience stores and have been robbed at the point of a gun twice; I’ve pumped gas; I’ve babysat; I’ve cut lawns; I’ve delivered newspapers.” Ha-ha. Wait: babysat?!? [WSJ]

• Mitt Romney, still rich! Has made money off of genocide, gambling, and Google. Also, porn. [LAT]

• Yes, that’s sort of the point: DoJ argues that a suit to stop secret wiretapping should be dismissed because a court case could reveal secrets. What’s more, “The officials also said that the lawsuits should also be tossed because the plaintiffs have no direct proof they were spied on. ‘We cannot confirm or deny whether or not that’s true,’ one of the officials said.” [Threat Level]

• Kristol on Stewart for another episode of “two Jews disagreeing.” Graciously, Kristol does “not blame the voters for electing a Democratic congress.” On invading Iran: “It’s an idea!” Also, Stewart and the audience literally laugh in Kristol’s face when he says Iraq is “getting better.” Kristol does, however, assure Stewart that “the President does not consider you a pussy.”*