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I am shocked as the train is hugely empty today – think back to the Olympics. Tube strike today and I thought we would be overrun with fuckwits but no, it looks like they have stayed at home. I saw pictures of Oxford Circus last night, with hundreds of people trying to get into the station and I just laughed as people in the West End are so fucking lazy, and don’t walk anywhere. Tube or nothing for them – City people aren’t afraid to put hoof to pavement to get where we need to go. I am getting the bus as usual this morning though as I know it won’t be that bad. I did have a woman with a million bags sitting next to me, but she soon fucked off when two seats became available and so she is squeezed into the aisle seat and her bags are sitting on the inside. She has on a pair of acid wash skinny jeans and she looks ridiculous, like the colour has been spray painted on to her legs. She is on her phone as she was when she was penning me in, so my ipod was on the second her ass slid down the back of the seat next to me as that is how rotund folk tend to shoehorn their way into Southeastern seats. I am not using my amazing free gift today – it is above for you as I forgot to blog it yesterday. It was shoved into my hand at London Bridge yesterday and I’m still confused as to what it is for. The heatwave is over and it would be cheaper for them surely to just provide bottles of water rather than empty bottles. I conclude that this is Southeastern tackling the issue of needing to lock toilets on late night trains when you need them most and so this is a portable receptical to fill with piss or vomit, whatever takes your fancy. Once full, you can save it up and throw it at staff members when trains are fucked. Ensure you loosen the lid before hurling though to ensure it goes everywhere. Might be something to save for Meet The Managers one morning… Food for thought. The usual hotbed of fuckery that is Westcombe Park is actually pretty empty and so I shall enjoy this journey. There are so many seats available for them to sit that they don’t know what to do with themselves. The startled cyclist in a headlights look is across most faces. Let’s hope it stays like this, hey?