Archives

All posts for the month November, 2013

When I first was introduced to social networking sites it was Myspace. Lisa Hall signed me up with my first account. I was naive back then. I remember telling people, “I have come to burn in the fire of relationship.” I was attracted to group functions and somehow I became associated with the FAPS. I was exposed to trolling for the first time. I wanted to be known and to know others, but the internet was a nasty, mean-spirited place. It was at that time that I started studying trolls and their behavior. I was curious how much one could know about people that were concealing their true selves and misrepresenting themselves.

Some people troll life by being shitty humans, the faps were no exception. So arrogant, they considered themselves some manner of elite trolls. They were very famous to themselves and they were the most obnoxious social climbers one would ever want to know. The more one knew about them the less interest and respect one had for them.

The Faps assumed that I was like them and that I wanted them to like me. They trolled me for years, and I just observed their behavior and experimented on them. The interesting thing is that I came to know everything about them even though they were concealing and misrepresenting and they knew nothing about me even though I was trying to be known. These people weren’t growing, weren’t learning and weren’t really in relationship with one another. They acted like a bunch of retards fighting over who gets to hump the doorknob. I realized at this time that people who squelch the fire of creativity in others do the same to themselves. These people were so critical and cynical of everybody and at the same time completely unconscious of themselves.

LILU

Lilu became the leader of the group. She became some manner of troll collector, she internet dated a troll named Scat. He never really trolled me, but he trolled all of the faps mercilessly. Lilu thought she would control the internet by getting all of the trolls under her rule or something, kind of stupid, she learned the hard way trolls can’t be predicted or controlled. She hates pictures of herself being posted on the internet. She is some weird lamer troll living in Australia, she doesn’t really internet anymore, like she used to. Here is what she looks like, this is her sexy dress.

KAT / BUNNY TOKO

Was the first person to really troll me. She came at me out of the blue hard, she started reporting all of the images in my Photobucket back when I had it set to public. Kat was the type of person whose internal ugliness was only matched by her external ugliness. I have a rule that I don’t troll people unless they attack me. Because they had never seen me troll they thought I couldn’t, the concept had just never interested me, but since I couldn’t have useful, meaningful, interesting online relationships I chose to make the best of it by studying and experimenting on trolls.

Kat was one of the most vicious, nasty, and backstabbing people anybody could ever hope to know. She trolled other women with their nudes and publicly ridiculed and humiliated them. She was the most cutthroat and underhanded female troll I have ever known and I say that because she was also the least interesting, she was just mean, and stupid, and ugly. I got her nudes when she posted them in Willis Warren’s group which I had hacked. Every time she would try to humiliate a woman who was better looking and more interesting than herself I would post her noodz to remind people of the source. Kat had all of the stunning good looks of James Carville without any of the intelligence or the winning personality.

I think she eventually got knocked up by Stavro. I feel that they deserve each other, I think Stav could have done better, but I like to think that bad taste is an unforgivable sin. Maybe they will have some good times until she eats him….

LEVAR PATRICK

One of Kat’s brilliant social climbing and trolling techniques was lying. Yes, that’s right, they had taken their brilliant talents of being shitty human beings in real life and translated those into trolling “skills”. Kat said that I had bizarre pictures in my photobucket, photos of trannies and the like. Levar picked up this lie and ran with it, saying that he had seen them himself personally. The funny thing is if that had been the case then Photobucket would have deleted them because they would have been reported since my bucket was set to public. 3 other people that i have known online have had complete access to my bucket since that time and I can assure you their are no trannies in there. However, Levar, posted photos of dogs being brutally raped by humans, the Justin Bieber photo at the top of the blog and this….

Levar was annoying but he never really came at me until Facebook, perhaps because I was devastating his little troll posse. He had finally gotten enough of my attention that I decided to take the game to him. He prided himself on being invisible, no pictures of himself in public circulation, no information about himself generally known. I hacked a group on Facebook where he was posting his photos and conversations and I started lighting him up. There was a troll by the name of Kage Pessymystic that had hated Levar for a long time and when i started posting his photos the chink in his armor had been found. Levars online reputation plummeted and he became a punchline. His ability to white knight and offer his false testimony about people’s characters was decimated.

ERIN SHROEDER OR MISS SNOWJOB

The group eventually dissolved and broke off into factions. One of the things I learned from my encounter with the faps is that when you have a group of psychopaths if you force them to use their own resources instead of steal others resources, they will eventually turn on one another and cannibalize each other. Erin was pretty cool with me if a little two-faced. She had a falling out with the faps and they all turned on her. One of the most interesting things about troll behavior is how merciless they are, how they over react, anything for the smallest, doucheyest sense of victory, and how they aren’t capable of detecting their own horse shit.

JARAD PECHIE

Jared was this self absorbed white knight character that liked to pretend he was a cowboy who for some reason Erin was hopelessly in love with, I think it was the cowboy hat. I never had a problem with him until one day he comes into Fight Club and he gets this strange idea that I am the alpha troll in that group. The conceit had never crossed my mind. So he starts trolling me. He like everybody else thought that nobody could get to him and like everybody else he was wrong. He was in a lot of politics groups with me, and he would give his drunken cowboy opinion on the world and the government, didn’t really bother me, it wasn’t like he could debate, he was just another asshole with an opinion, and people are entitled to their assholes.

It is like Brian Blazejack says, when you are the old gunslinger in town everybody wants a shot at the title. They play the odds, they think that you have to lose sometime, maybe I will accidentally get lucky. Of course there were other factors too, he was friends with Willis Warren, who we will get to in a moment.

WILLIS WARREN

Where do I start, what a mess, wow. He and Kat ended up having a fallout, Willis freaked the fuck out and did something so heinous that Bill Worthington Smith couldn’t even defend him even though they were the tightest couple on the internet because they went to college together. Scat used to troll Willis mercilessly until he fell of his game because of Lilu. Willis was a walking caricature of himself and took himself way too seriously. The guy trolled himself most of the time. It was as though somebody challenged you to a fist fight and then started beating themselves senseless.

Willis the internet tough guy was always talking to me like he was so tough. I didn’t post pictures of myself back in the day too frequently. After Mr. Internet Tough guy had booted me from his group he started talking shit about me, saying that the picture that I had posted of my arm was somebody else’s photo, because there was no way I was that muscular.

When he started trolling me on Facebook with his tough guy routine I jammed him up. I suggested that I fly out to Texas and we go to a gym and find out who was the tough guy in real life. He agreed and when I kept insisting that I was serious (which I was) he said that if I flew to Texas he would shoot me. He immediately deleted his comment but not before it was screenshot and used to troll him out of Fight Club. Which brings us to our next troll…

BILL WORTHINGTON SMITH

Billy was one of the weirdest and most closeted people I have ever known. Most of the time he just contemptuously ignored me and bit his tongue. He had certain soft spots though, Willis being one of them, he would white knight for this weird little Mexican kid named Michael Villanueva. Billy would troll with a sock that had Patrick Bateman from American Psycho and some phonetic play on his name. The common theme with the faps was that they had these bizarre and distorted self images that had nothing to do with reality. They were all lying to themselves about themselves and membership was granted into their group by agreeing to tell them all the lies they wanted to hear.

NICOLE

Women that think they are attractive are not attractive to me, and Nicole’s sole self esteem peg was that she was what people other than myself considered attractive, but she was dumber than dog shit. I think it was because she dieted so severely that she didn’t have enough calories to run her brain. She would post pictures of fine art and surrealism to make people think she was deeper than a puddle which she wasn’t, and if anybody disagreed with her about something she would fly into these psychotic rages cussing like a sailor with tourettes syndrome. Sometimes she would do this thing where she would try to understand something mildly sophisticated online in front of everybody like a philosophical concept. I felt pity for her in spite of myself. Watching her try to wrap her mind around a simple concept was like watching somebody trying to wrap a corn tortilla around a thanksgiving turkey, or watching a parakeet fighting with its own reflection.

AVA

And then there was Ava, I never had anything against her personally, she had this weird karaoke thing going on. She liked sad, whiny, depressing music, but I liked some of it to. Yet another pseudo deep female. I started to notice about the faps, the difference between them and me was that they could be totally satisfied with dumb females who over rated themselves. I started noticing that when they trolled they always had a girl whom they would rally around, like indians. Defeating the Faps was really easy, shoot the chief and all the Indians would suffer vicarious butthurt. Once I figured out this tactic I routinely destroyed them. Whichever woman they were white knighting I would freak her out and then all of the fun was gone from their little charade.

GREG

Was part of a group of antitheist trolls. He was really scientifically knowledgeable but a complete moron when it came to people. It was because of studying his meme that I came up with this concept of people being non delusional towards facts but delusional towards people. He worshiped facts but at the same time these factoids were completely disconnected from one another, the man had no philosophy. He was completely controlled by disconnected factoids which he kept suspended in his mind in a kind of dead lifeless shrine. He didn’t make the jump to Facebook.

KENASTY

Kenaz loved to troll with Greg. They would make fun of everybody that believed in any kind of religiosity. Kenaz didn’t realize that his lip service to Science didn’t make him any smarter. Not being able to evaluate material he would point out spelling errors as though he was making the logical fallacy “argument from error” by trying to throw out the whole argument based on a mispunctuation. Kenaz is an Irish troll, real name Simon Mcevoy. He got really fat but then he started slimming down. He humbled himself a little during the transition from myspace to facebook realizing that his little group wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. Kenaz likes to get women to overlook his physical hideousness and treat him like a human on the internet, that makes him feel like people.

He is into discordian magick and perceives himself as a purveyor of chaos. His father figure was some chaos magickian. He conceals this fact because it is very sentimental to him. This is him showing off his tattoo.

GARSTER

Garster and Kenaz were almost inseparable as well. Garster is a butthurt, introverted, chubby, probably bisexual troll who posts lolcats and is obsessed with caturday. He feels victimized by the fact that he doesn’t like himself and he chooses to blame the world for his lack of self esteem instead of changing himself into a person that he can respect.

There are trolls and then there are trolls. Some trolls have no technique and no code of ethics. I don’t consider myself a troll thought I know how to do it. I feel that I am considered a troll because of guild by association. I didn’t really get to know Blazejack until the troll exodus from Myspace. I was mainly associated with the Faps at that time though I don’t think that I could ever have been considered to be one of them. A social climbingAustralian troll by the name of Lilu was hob knobbing with some of the major trolls and she was trying to bridge the gap between her lamer fap trolls and the L33t trolls on Myspace. She failed miserably, I think she was trying to set herself up as some kind of Mary Mother of Trolls or something. She has since been trolled off the internet.

When I made the transition from Myspace to Facebook I was immediately in the circles of all of the trolls. At this point I still had not met Brian, but everybody kept on confusing me with Brian. As I got more familiar with the newer group I found that everybody was always confusing Blazejack with me and vice verse. People that hated him hated me and people that hated me hated him. I get to know people pretty slowly but this piqued my interest, if everyone was confusing us with one another he must be a pretty swell guy.

In spite of his paranoid schizophrenia and other mood disorders I found him principled, and decent, one of the most interesting, fun loving, and consistent people on the internet. He didn’t harass people that didn’t attack him and even when he did he under reacted and they over reacted. Peoples reactions to him were histrionic. He trolled them by being himself and speaking his mind. He really was like me.

To say that we created a strategic alliance would be misleading, we did nothing of the sort, at least not verbally. Brian, like myself, knows himself very well, accurately even. I don’t become emotional, I don’t change the way I am in relationship with someone without communicating that the nature of the relationship has changed. I treat people the way they treat me. I don’t change my relationship with a person because of their relationship with someone else. I don’t conceal my intent, and I don’t misrepresent my intent to people that have remained consistent with me. I don’t need to do that in order to win, I have skills, intelligence, and technique. I have resources. Brian was much like myself.

People couldn’t drive a wedge between us because of the nature of our relationship which they couldn’t grasp. Our relationship was both strong and weak. It both existed and it didn’t exist. We couldn’t be played off one another because we weren’t social climbers. Our friendship continued to bemuse, baffle, perplex, and confound everybody. Even people that had known him for a long time. We just had no incentive to dislike one another and every incentive to keep one another as allies. We were also not thin-skinned pussies, we realized that words were words. He considered himself a Buddhist and I am a Shaivist mystic, there is a long standing tradition between the two disciplines, according t Heinrich Zimmer Buddhism is a sub sect of Shaivism.

He was also not a homo-phobe. I playfully trolled him with photoshops that had slight homo erotic themes. This further confused the opposition. They really weren’t smart enough to figure out how we were collectively fucking with their heads. I was experimenting with my psycholinguistic philosophical model and this concept of survival data and how every event and word gets interpreted. People who hated us seeing both of us getting along with one another and posting stuff that others would be concerned about posting if they were concerned with their public reputations had negative survival data for them. Brian and I don’t give a single fuck what morons think about us. That is what they couldn’t comprehend. Their judgments meant absolutely nothing to us. We weren’t going to chase our reputations and jump through the hoops of complete imbeciles.

Brian doesn’t hold grudges, with few exceptions, like if you are a complete idiot or you act like you are being friendly so that you can screw him over. Brian has his favorites, there was the one ex meth addict, what’s his name…Damnit! He is going to kill me. He is cool peeps. Everybody has their problems. He was more interested in being popular than Brian, a little less skilled and a little less principled, but he wasn’t a bad person. And their was Rain Stevens the Canadian Prostitute. She was probably more confused than anyone by the bizarre friendship between Brian and myself.

Sometimes I wonder if I have multiple personalities or if it is just that people have been so mentally compartmentalized by social norms that they have mental categories like garbage cans. One of the things I most respected about Brian was how concerned and protective he was of his friends, and how quick he was to come to their aid or say an encouraging word or take their side. He was never a moral coward. He wouldn’t stay quiet and allow an injustice to take place because it would effect his social status if he didn’t speak up.

Brian was always talking about the old gunslinger problem. Everybody wants to be the man to take down the legend, so people would attack you for no other reason than they might get lucky and increase their troll rating from unknown to THE MAN THAT TOOK DOWN CYBER GECKO.

I remember this closeted gay troll from Australia took a run at Blaze. He had this entourage of ultra unfunny, hyper defensive trolls from Australia that took absolutely no chances on giving out even the smallest portion of genuine info about themselves. Grampa Ivy was the only one with enough nuts to actually be slightly capable of relationship. He, of course, set about getting in the e-pants of all the good looking, young, male, apprentice trolls. Who didn’t have enough good taste to recognize the intent of that lecherous old hipster. It was lulzy, one day he posted a picture of himself on this scooter and then everybody started commenting on how gay it looked and then he started posting pix of motorcycles to try to butch it up a bit.

Brian loves dogs, and lizards and all manner of life. He gets exited when he gets a new lizard. For a while we trolled together as cyber gecko and saber chameleon, that was probably the most fun I had before the Facebook banhammer came down and fb predisposed itself to the manipulations of report fa9s.

Well I have two shoops left I want to post and no way really to qualify one so I am just going to throw it out there.

Lynn: Ohmigod, this is so Gnarly. I can’t believe that this guy is actually making a big deal out of this. You are always saying that it is best to use specific incidents to deconstruct with your philosophical and psychological models. Can you please deconstruct this and show us how you interpret people? Mr. Mindhacker, lol.

Joxua: Absolutely, and I agree that this is a good example to use for this. First of all he has started the conversation with his mind closed, he is not open to relationship or negotiation. He is calling the use of his unprotected image, “theft” which is an exaggeration on his part, which is technically correct. Remember that the Pharisees and Scribes used the letter of the Law against Jesus since they couldn’t debate him and win any other way. Jesus knew more about the spirit of the law. So he is taking a…