one

Well sadly I actually don’t have a middle name, which I find to be extremely upsetting. I always wanted a middle name so that one day if a person I didn’t want to know who I was or basically someone creepy asked me what my name was I could give them my middle name and I technically wouldn’t be lying. It’s like a second identity; makes you feel like you’re in a movie. Or at least I thought so. I figured because neither of my parents had middle names, I thought it was a cultural thing that neither would my cousins would have it. But alas I found that they did, though it wasn’t the best of names I’d say.

This leads me state, why I’m Ace here. Initially my parents were torn on what to name me when I was born. You see, I wasn’t born in my home country like parents, and neither was I born somewhere typically from the millennium generation. So my father wanted to name me more closely to the culture of the country that I was born in, but my mother wanted a name that was more culturally sound to us. So they compromised; I mean I like my name, but when I asked my dad, he told me the potential name that he would’ve named me if he could. And Ace is the short version of that name, I mean if the day comes that I really want a middle name I just might make it so.

Clearly it’s been just a shitty week. After everything that has happened. I had to go and get drunk on a Monday night and officially have my one night stand. Sorry bestie, didn’t know it was going to happen, so I couldn’t bring my “One Night Stand Kit” with me.

I actually was suppose to go out with my bestie to grab dinner (In Tinder Guy’s area) since it’s a little out of town. But turns out the place is fucking closed on Mondays. Just why. Why?

So we decide to grab wings and beer because we were starving. We sit down, and it was a good time. Though me and my bestie take forever to leave since we sit there and talk. So the exceptionally close table beside us of two males finally leave and they bring in the next two customers. Which happens to be my friend’s EX BOYFRIEND with his FIRST DATE.

Let me repeat. He was having his first date with his ex girlfriend sitting LESS THAN A METER AWAY FROM HIM. I died. My bestie hated me for the rest of the night. We got snippets of their conversation, which was terribleehh by the way. But none the less a good pick me up.

So after dinner my bestie runs home to study for her mid-terms and since I have a much easier load I had nothing to worry about. And so I think it’s a great idea to message this guy I knew for a day to go out with me. Why? You ask. I do not know. Fuck I wish I knew.

And thus I go over to his place, drink some more. Head to the club, drink so more. Puke a little because I clearly drank too much. Head back to my place, where we couldn’t fuck because no one had a condom. Yay. Since my clothes were already off, I decided to throw on my trench over my bare body and shove all the clothes I would’ve needed for the morning of, in a bag and we walk over to his place. Obviously there, he couldn’t launch his rocket.

So somehow in my right mind, instead of leaving I just slept at his place. Again don’t ask me why I thought this was okay. Then first thing I get waken up to is this guy beside me, trying to turn me on. Let’s just say he does, 1 minute for that, 10 seconds to grab the condom and put it on, another minute for the deed to be done and bam. Done. He got up and ran off to the bathroom while I had some time to question what the fuck I just did.

I got up and did what I had to do and literally threw on my coat again and tried to say the easiest thing I could possibly say to get out of there. And even now I’m sighing with regret.

I know before I was complaining about how it was hard to make friends, and now in a week my whole floor is like family.
Of course there are people you like less than others, and others who you would want to spend more one on one time with. And all my life I’ve never really had a huge friend group at a time. Though I always did wonder how it would feel to have a large group of friends.

I realized there are many pros and cons to having your whole floor as your friends.

For example, if I wanted to have a one on one and make a connection with one person it’s so hard to do! Or to drink with a few friends…nuh uh. That will not happen…ever. There is no secrecy, and I for sure need mine! I don’t share my life story with everyone, and I’m not choosing now to start. Everyone also seems to know about your plans as well.

Though if we wanted to go to a party most of us would be down. And there’s always someone for a lunch/dinner date, BUT you may get that random person that may join.

I know it’s only been my second week, but I realized that I have to be careful of what I say and how I act. It’s not like I don’t like these girls I’m just not used to this many people, and my distrust in people doesn’t help either.