Somebody vandalized the dog park sign in my neighborhood and added "If you bring a tennis ball to the park and my dog steals it. We are keeping it"

So.. if you could write rules of the dog park.. what would they be? lol

1. Feel free to cross the unwritten gangland type line separating the large dog/small dog owners. Come on guys! *bursts in song* WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?
2. Take a hint. If I am sitting on a bench with my headphones drinking starbucks. I don't want to chat.
3. If you don't pick up your dogs poo. I will shiv you like this is a turkish prison

__________________

Disclaimer: I work for Trupanion and love it/our policy! But I do not speak for the company or as the company.

Like when you're snagging a few quiet moments to read or work on something and someone (usually a total stranger) walks up, stands there while you ignore them, hoping they'll GTF away and they finally say "whatcha reading/doing?" And then, when you answer in a one syllable monotone without looking up, they proceed to start asking more questions, trying to get your attention . . .

__________________In a controversy the instant we feel anger we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves. ~Buddha

Stupid is the most notoriously incurable and contagious disease known to mankind. If you find yourself in close proximity to someone infected with stupid, walk away as soon as said infection is noted.

There are few things more nauseating than pure obedience. ~ Kvothe

***8206;"silence is the language of god, all else is poor translation."
— Rumi
Be a god. Know when to shut up.

If you are a frail 75+ year old woman afraid of being knocked down and breaking a hip...again, don't come in the freaking dog park EVERY FREAKING MORNING! Yes sitting on the bench may help your odds, but shouting and failing your arms and legs any time dogs come near is not going to make you any friends and you may find your limbs part of a tug game.

1. Do not FVCKING TOUCH my dog!!! No, he does not deserve to be alpha rolled because he growled at your rude puppy. No, he does not deserve to be kicked because he's playfully humping your dog (and your dog is humping right back).

People are soooo stupid and soooo lucky that Fozzie wouldn't lay a tooth on anyone. I'm shocked by what they will do in a heartbeat, before I even have time to react. And I am always watching him, and he is very much under voice control. It's one thing if they're breaking up a fight but correcting what they deem as unacceptable behavior, which their dog perfectly enjoys? Ask me to get my dog and I will. Or better yet, let your dog decide what they don't like, and my dog will happily oblige. This is a dog park. Dogs like to wrestle, hump, chase, and will communicate with each other vocally. If you don't like and don't understand normal dog behavior GTFO!

There are (usually) two gates for a reason. If you and your family can't fit in the little safety box created, then the rest of your family unit needs to wait until one or the other gate is closed. People do not like to chase their dogs around the neighborhood, heart in throat, in 5oclock traffic.

Oh...and infants in carriers placed on a bench or the ground WILL be investigated by my dogs. And probably others.

I really don't like my dogs to be practically molested by people either. Petting is good. Hugging, frantic scritching, roughing up, trying to pick up...yeah, no.