Sheryl Crow thinks it's "pathetic" that Lance Armstrong is dating Ashley Olsen. Paris Hilton has been frequenting New York hot spots very late at night (or, rather, early in the morning). Donald Trump Jr. is suing the board members of his West Side condo for kicking him off. Jon Corzine's ex, 48-year-old Carla Katz, is dating a 32-year-old American soldier and former model. Torch, a new club slated to open tonight, is scrambling to get Tiki Barber and 800 other invitees not to show up because the plumbing isn't ready. A guy on the subway once told Matthew Broderick that he looked and sounded exactly like Matthew Broderick.

When Scotsmen invaded the city earlier this week for the Friends of Scotland's annual Dressed to Kilt charity fashion show, the event's unofficial king, Sir Sean Connery, was notably absent. Why? As he told us the next night at a dinner Hennessy Cognac threw in his honor, he was recovering from a kidney exam at New York Presbyterian. "I actually heard from quite a few people that everyone thought I was dead because I wasn't there last night," he said. "No, I had to have a test because last time I was here, I had a tumor on the kidney. Everything's perfect." Well, almost perfect.
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