Emotional spending is what happens when you go to the store and spend money on things that you don’t really need - but buying them makes you feel better. Although most people think that emotional spending only happens when you are sad, and only to women, the truth is that emotional spending can happen at times of any strong emotion, and it can happen to anyone, male or female. Learning the signals that accompany these emotions is the key to curbing emotional spending.

Everyone has had one of those days when the only thing that will make them feel better is spending a shameful sum of money at the mall. We all know someone who has blown her entire paycheck on the latest fashions. Men can be a bit more subtle in their emotional spending. Maybe your guy went out and bought $200 worth of stuff for his car. Or perhaps, after a lousy day at work, he came home with an expensive piece of jewelry for you that you know he really can’t afford. Although many people don’t believe in emotional spending, most people have, at some point, been guilty of it.

Emotional spending doesn’t have to be about spending large sums of money. Any form of spending that is not related to need and ties in to how the act of buying something makes a person feel can be considered emotional spending.

Many people buy small things, but if you are a big spender, this could really add up.

On the surface, emotional spending appears harmless. After all, wasn’t retail therapy invented to cure what ails you? Well, unless you’re Paris Hilton, rampant emotional spending is likely to leave you in a financial lurch. Slow but steady spending of small amounts adds up too. Using credit to finance your retail therapy may mean that you get stuck with a card balance that you can’t pay at the end of the month. For most people, emotional spending can result in some serious financial problems and should therefore be nipped in the bud as soon as possible.

Emotional Reasons

Many people shop for all kinds of reasons. If you’ve had a bad day at work, if you are bored, if you are happy, if you are sad, you go shopping. Although, in theory, there’s nothing wrong with shopping, the problem arises when you break the bank doing it. Stores are guilty of helping us along on our destructive path to bankruptcy. How many times have you stood in line at the checkout only to end up adding three packs of gum and four magazines to your purchases? These things are done intentionally to get you to buy more. Stores actually conduct studies to ascertain how people shop and how to get them to spend, spend, spend. Really, we’re doomed the minute we enter the store.

Even going online can be dangerous when we’re emotionally primed to spend. The moment we enter our internet browser, we’re bombarded with ads for things that sound great but that we don’t need. Have you ever logged on to order a copy of a book you’ve been dying to read and when the online book store directs you to the page where it says “other people who bought (name of book) also bought,” you purchase everything the bookseller suggests? Online spending is probably less immediately painless than shopping in a brick and mortar store. After all, it’s just a series of clicks, and you’ve spent lots of your hard earned dough. This is also planned. It’s called suggestive selling. The bookseller suggests a few titles that are in a genre similar to the book you are purchasing and, because those books sound good too, you buy them. Suggestive selling is dangerous when we aren’t in emotional spending mode; when we are, it’s deadly.

Sure, there are worse ways you can act out your emotions than shopping; however tame you think emotional spending is, it is still a highly destructive way to express your emotions. Emotional spending has ruined the finances of many a smart cookie. Often you don’t even realize the repercussions until it is too late and you are filing for bankruptcy. Emotional spending is often thought as irresponsible, but what it is, is….emotional.

That makes breaking the habit of emotional spending fall into the realm of psychological issues, and the problem is often considered an addiction for certain people.

Stopping Emotional Spending

It took decades for the psychological community to recognize that impulsive spending signified a real problem, and to respond with information to make the emotional spender more aware of his or her “problem.” One of the main suggestions is that the emotional spender must become aware of what triggers the urge to spend and to avoid the trigger or, in lieu of that, avoid the shopping behavior. Emotional spenders can successfully control the urge to shop. By becoming aware of what you need and when you need it, you can stop emotional spending in its tracks. First for the emotional spender is to never shop without a list and to buy only what’s on the list. If a pink polka dotted bikini is not on your list, don’t buy it. If the latest weekly tabloid is not on your list, don’t buy that either. Also, avoid the usual triggers. Don’t shop after watching a sad movie; call a friend. Don’t head to the store after a bad day at work; go for a jog instead.

If you’re bored and you’re an emotional spender, either leave your checkbook and your bank cards at home and window shop only, or try doing something else. If you need justification for buying something, you probably don’t need it and should spend some time analyzing why you are spending money on things you don’t need. Doing something constructive instead of spending your hard-earned cash all over town can help you trade a bad habit for a good one and make those emotional times far more productive and save you from financial ruin in the long run.

Once you understand why you make the purchases and learn how to stop making them then you must analyze what repercussions your spending has caused. High amounts of spending can easily lead to credit card debt and even possibly bankruptcy. If you believe you are on this track it is vital that you speak with a financial advisor. A financial advisor can get you onto a budget that reflects your lifestyle and can even budget some shopping money.

Are You Shopping Savvy?

Coupon queen or impulse buyer - which is your shopping style? No matter if you're shopping for clothes, groceries or cars, you need to be super savvy if you want the best product at the best value. Find out if you're throwing your money away or if you're taking full advantage of your buying power with this shopping quiz.