So after a few wake-up drinks Seamus began to reflect on his good fortune and the possible downside that when discovered he might be considered a criminal. So being the fine upstanding citizen he is, he called the cops and tried to explain the situation in thick drunken Irish. How they found him, they must have used the 911 location feature to find him because I can imagine him shouting "which bar? it's a fookin bar, they all look the seeaaaaaaam!".

At any rate they ultimately find him by peeking in the windows and there's Seamus seated at the bar toasting them. And it's raining outside. And they are shouting at him, trying to get him to find a key or jimmy with the lock and he's shouting "it's no use, I done all I can". Typical Irishman, utterly resigned to his fate to suffer life as stoically as possible while seated on a bar stool. So the cops call the owner but the owner doesn't have they key, the manager has the key and like everybody in the bar/restaurant scene in that town, he's up to his ears in a hot tub full of blow and fast women. He doesn't want to be found by anybody and especially not his boss or uniformed cops. Oh no way nope uh-uh.

So there's the cops, the owner out in the rain and Seamus seated inside at the bar in serene comfort slogging down top shelf booze and watching them as though they are a very large television created for his own amusement.

Sadly, a locksmith was eventually called which put an end to Seamus' Dream Night Out but the owner, in recognition of the fact that Seamus didn't call up half the expat Irish Republican Army to clear the place entirely, pressed no charges and let Seamus off one mythic epic bar tab.

The only one that tells this story better than me is Seamus himself because the Irish have this knack of explaining total calamity like it's just such a part of every day life and stuff like this for Seamus truly was. Plus Seamus came with that other great Irish trait: absolute 100% never-let-you-down LOYALTY. That and his sense of humour made him a favourite wherever he went.

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Most of those who think so actually don't and most of those who think sew actually rip.