The most common definition of a "bear" is a man who is hairy, has facial hair, and a cuddly body. However, the word "Bear" means many things to different people, even within the bear movement. Many men who do not have one or all of these characteristics define themselves as bears, making the term a very loose one. Suffice it to say, "bear" is often defined as more of an attitude than anything else - a sense of comfort with our natural masculinity and bodies that is not slavish to the vogues of male attractiveness that is so common in gay circles and the culture at large.

A terrifying beast that will literally rip your face of just so that he can show his bear buddies how stupid you look. A bear will fuck your mother while fingering your little sister and then eat your pancreas while drilling a hole in the top of your head and then pissing up your nose an out that hole.

A bear can swallow an orange and shit out a new world religion.

When you see waves at the beach, its because the ocean is trying to escape from bears who feel like swimming.

A retarded boy from Wisconsin once hugged a bear on a camping trip long ago. That boy turned out to be Jesus.

The Space Shuttle was originally created to escape from Bears and find a new bear-free planet. The Appollo and Columbia shuttles had the misfortune of not bear-proofing the doors.

The Extinction of the Dinosaurs was actually caused by one Bear and 7 Beers.

Friday the 13th is based on the true story of a Bear who got bored on day.

A Grizzly from Northern Canada has more friends on Myspace than Tom.

God decided one day to fight a Bear in one of his forests. The outcome resulted in the forest becoming the Sahara Desert and God becoming Anna Nicole Smith.

Bears

"Hey, I heard Chuck Norris died yesterday." "Yeah, he made a Bear joke in public."