You can’t turn around team performance sitting in meetings. To change outcomes on the team: Be with them. Meet with them. Share feedback with them. Teach them how to win. Stop talking TO and AT them. Start sharing their own strengths and opportunities with them. Coach them how to be better… ‘them’, not just better…

1. Changing things from Ego. Why You Do it: New leaders want to demonstrate their value and in an attempt to do so, often make radical changes as soon as they arrive. Don’t. No matter what. The Problem: When you do this, you discredit the entire team and all the work they did before you…

Every manager I talk with these days is overwhelmed. It is the most common feeling I hear about. Too much work. Too little resources. Too little time. Feeling overwhelm for most of us shuts us down. This feeling actually makes us less productive. In the very moment when we say we want to be more…

You think you can make your employees understand. You think when they push back, you should too. You think you can win. And prove it. And … be ‘right’. What if none of that was necessary? It’s tempting to be drawn into an argument. To get them to agree with you. So we can all…

The most valuable practice you can develop as a leader, when dealing with difficult employees, is to focus on facts, not opinions. Notice what they DO or DON’T do, rather than the labels (lazy, rude, argumentative, know-it-all, etc.) you assign for their behavior. Practice today just noticing WHAT you observe rather than thinking you know…

Oh…. Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone was just a rockstar and achieved all their goals? Wouldn’t it be nice if we didn’t actually have to coach or develop or address performance gaps? But, alas, this is the role of a leader. To build performance, not inherit it. When a player doesn’t perform we have…

I’m 47 this year. I’ve had, what I believe to be, way too many conversations with my contemporaries of late, about how they WISH they’d done this… or that.. or hadn’t worried so much about (this or that). In my experience, many adults react to life, much like a pin ball reacts to the pins…

We often think we have to justify our anger or frustration. We think we need other people to know WHY we feel the way we do. Which of course means we want them to know how they or someone else caused our pain. And how they need to change to make us feel better. But…

Every weekend people participate in marathons, mud runs, cycle races, and other physical challenges. They train for months, sometimes years, to be ready for the challenge. Most motivational messages about success and goals use visual images of people doing challenging sports and activities. When we reference overcoming fear and difficulty and pain, we focus on…

Every year, I offer an intimate, exclusive coaching intensive on-the-beach for the women in my community. It’s call ‘She is Relentless’. To say the work we do together is powerful; while sitting on the beach, under the pines, on the nature preserve that surrounds the Turtle Bay Resort, is such an understatement. Some have gone so…

“Dealing with a difficult person is the ultimate stretch assignment.” So says my colleague and friend Sharon Huntsman. Man, is she right. We don’t knowingly sign up for dealing with difficult people at work. But they show up. When they do, we have a choice. Begrudge, hide, and avoid the situation. Blame them for being difficult…

Most difficult people don’t choose to be difficult. They don’t wake up and think “I can’t wait to make other people uncomfortable today!” In fact, until pointed out to them, most of them have no clue. They actually wake up and think its YOU or someone else that is difficult… (just sayin’) They are just being who…

If you have a difficult person on your team, I’m confident I know why. I’m also confident I can help you fix the problem and move your team forward. The Problem: You have a difficult employee on your team. The Reason the Problem is a Problem: They impact team culture. Bring people down. Impact team…

Things happen everyday that we cannot control. We believe that many of those things rattle us. I learned some time ago that it isn’t the circumstance that creates our experience. It is our thinking about the circumstance that designs the experience we have with it. I see this in my clients day-after-day. My employee doesn’t…

I’m writing this article during a moment of total frustration. After years of confronting this tired issue, I’ve decided it’s time to write about it. Given my current ‘feeling state’ it may be the most imperfect time to jot down my thoughts. But after another round of working with over 300 leaders in the past…

After 20 years of watching and learning from the leaders I’ve worked with, I’ve concluded we all have one or two of the following preferences: The Starter: Someone who has an idea. Sees the vision and builds an organization from scratch. They thrive in creation and creativity. The take risks, daily. They are almost addicted…

Uber is a hot mess. And the CEO is the crux of the problems. The good news is, he released a statement indicating he wants a leadership coach. Awesome. The best news will be if he takes willful action and changes his behavior. THAT remains to be seen. Here’s what Uber and its CEO are…

Too many managers accept invitations to argue with their staff. Debating is different that arguing. Arguing is simply defending your point of view. When we argue we don’t listen. When we argue, we aren’t supervising our emotions. When we stop supervising our emotions, we run the risk of making significant mistakes as leaders AND impairing our…

Venting and complaining slow teams down. Complaining and negative spin foster toxicity and poor team performance. I think many managers believe that if they let their employees ‘vent’ they are helping them. Venting sessions can also be called complaint sessions. Complaining creates suffering for the complainer. Complaining is like punching yourself in the face. It…

Hi Kris, This week I thought I’d share a video blog for a change! I’m working on videos for my upcoming “The Core for Leaders” membership program and figured I’d try out a few video blogs as well… Would love your thoughts! And please feel free to share with your teammates and colleagues! A quick…

I had the opportunity to lead a few sessions with some awesome leaders this past week. So many brilliant minds and thoughts! It was so energizing! We discussed the challenges they believe prevent team performance. The lists leaders came up with were robust, to say the least. As leaders shared their challenges, I asked them“Do…

Many managers report challenges with their direct boss ‘having their back’. As a result, managers feel unsupported and believe they lose credibility with their employees. Especially those who are low or non-performers. Why would senior leaders be unsupportive of their front line managers? In this quick video we’ll explore why that may happen and what…

My upcoming podcast is about Setting Expectations, so I thought I’d offer some included and additional highlights here. There are many valuable reasons WHY leaders should set clear expectations with team members. Clearly set AND COMMUNICATED expectations allow for: Less confusion on the team More engagement Better communication Stronger culture of accountability Higher performance Stronger…

I’m struggling with a decision right now. I’m actively not deciding and it’s driving me nuts. I do prefer a decision made, rather than living with one unsettled. As leaders who run businesses, we are called to make many decisions. And there are always a few that are difficult to make. As I think about…

Entitled. I hear it weekly. “They are so entitled.” “They believe they are entitled to… “ “They act so entitled.” “They are just a bunch of entitled (#@$^).” Individual leaders use this label all-too-frequently and it may just be having a dramatic impact on their team(s). A common definition of…

It’s the day after the end of a contentious election. Regardless of whether you are celebrating or hurting, we all have some responsibility as leaders. If we are happy, we need to be mindful of our tone and how we share our joy. Not everyone shares our elation. Being thoughtful of this will help…

Perfection stifles growth. If perfection could speak it would say: “Don’t do it wrong” “Don’t embarrass yourself” “Everyone will know if you make a mistake” “We cannot make errors” “Our mistakes define us” “There is a right way and a wrong way to do this and you aren’t doing it right” As long as…

As a part of our ongoing discussion about key strategies for successful managers, I’d like to chat about Manager Coaching: I know. You hear about it all the time. Coach your people. Are you coaching? How well do you coach your team? You know, you really do need to coach more…. So what the heck…

Every position in your organization exists to do something for the organization. Therefore, every role in your organization should have measures to evaluate its contribution to the organization. Please note, I’m referring to ROLES or POSITIONS not individuals or people. Individual performance will be discussed in the next installment about Coaching. Things to think…

What are your best practices as a manager? I’d love to know one thing YOU do that you believe is a difference maker on your team. There are a ton of ideas out there. Maybe even too many. I find that for many folks managing people they get a bit lost in all of…

If there’s a buzz word today, its ‘engagement’. Gallup’s work here is pretty tremendous and pretty astounding. Less than 30% of our work force is actually engaged. What-the-heck? How do we fix it? Here’s what won’t fix it: Jeans on Friday A Keurig in the break room Certificates or ‘rocks’ to celebrate awesomeness What…

When I lead teams, the most energizing thing I could do was to spend time with my team members. Every time I could get out into the centers and connect with people, I left feeling engaged, inspired and frankly full of new ideas! But, even though I knew it fed my spirit and my own…

I’ve worked with a lot of leaders lately who share a common thought. They believe they haven’t really earned their role. Or they believe that they really don’t know what they’re doing and eventually someone will find them out. They compare themselves to other people in similar roles or who have similar titles and they…

So many of us think we’re doing it wrong. We’re managing wrong. We’re coaching wrong. We’re not good enough at this or that. We hold ourselves up to some ideal that may or may not even exist. Here’s what I think. I do think that all of us are doing the best we can,…

Change happens every day. Our work is not static. We have to stop believing that things should stay the same. We have to stop expecting things to be consistent. A vital role as leaders today, is to move our teams, effectively through change. When we join our team in commiserating, complaining and moaning about change; we aren’t leading. It…

I watched this quick video last week and found it incredibly powerful. Asking this question can help direct our energy (for ourselves and our organization). Understanding THAT thing that breaks your heart, knowing your compelling reason to do what you do… it’s the secret sauce. I thought about it. What breaks my heart? Knowing that…

I cannot count the amount of times I’ve heard a manager tell me they’re a ‘people pleaser’. As a result, they find it difficult to: Say “no” Have conversations with others about performance Delegate Ask others to do work they know they could just do themselves (see delegate) Give bad news Change their mind Write-up…

Stop it. Stop waiting for other people to make decisions before you decide your own future. Example: “I need to wait and see if I’m going to get that promotion and then I’ll decide what to do.” Decide: do you want the promotion? If so, why? What will the promotion in this company bring you…

Many of my clients know that I lead a retreat every year (for women) in Hawaii. I decided to do this work about ten years ago .. FIVE years before I actually launched my first retreat experience. I was the mother of three young children at the time (twins who were two years old and…

Dear Leadership, I’m hoping we can just chat for a minute. I can tell you’re terribly confused and I don’t blame you. It’s been a tough go these past few… well… centuries. We’ve done our best to confuse you, haven’t we Leadership? We’ve wanted you to be so many things. We’ve wanted you to be…

When you think about having ‘the’ conversation do you get uncomfortable? Possibly avoid them all together? Here are a few tips to remember for the current conversation you need to have and any others that may come along: Make sure you have a coaching/communication practice in place for every direct report. Whether you meet monthly, bi-monthly…

As leaders we often have to help our employees deal with difficult team members. In my experience, most of us are not well equipped to deal with difficult people and the (potential) difficult conversations that we may have to have with them. Because we aren’t well equipped ourselves, we struggle with how to help others.…

“I can’t work with someone like that!” How many times have we heard ourselves or others say this? I heard it again just yesterday. And guess who’s the one who’s miserable in the relationship? (hint it’s not ‘them’) As managers, we have to work with all types of professionals. Stubborn ones. Negative ones. Self-focused ones.…

I listened to this podcast yesterday during two car trips. All I can say is that it is excellent. The host, Joe Polish and the guest author Adam Markel fill the podcast with incredible insights on Leading yourSELF. Markel recently published a book, Pivot: The Art and Science of Reinventing Your Career and Life, and…

I’m leading a workshop tomorrow on “Influencing Up”. In preparation for the workshop I read The Art of People, by Dave Kerpen. It’s an excellent read on some powerful key, simple insights to help us make better connections with one another. As a Coach, my job is to observe and understand my clients, not through…

I’m just back from attending The Life Coach School’s annual Coaches’ Mastermind. To say that it was powerful is an understatement. I have so many powerful nuggets to share, that I don’t know where to start! Thomas Sterner, author of The Practicing Mind spoke for FIVE HOURS! He gave us a lot of brilliant insights…

I’ve been attracted to an awesome book called Deep Work, by Cal Newport. In a world where we are called upon to have multiple tasks, conversations and decisions occupying our mind at once, our ability to connect to deep work is becoming increasingly rare. But the need for us to really connect to deep work…

Why did you sign up to be a manager? Was it for the promotion? The salary? The increased responsibility? Maybe it’s because it’s the next natural step to a longer term goal. Maybe it’s so you can have a broader impact and give back. All-too-often we don’t really know WHY we want to be managers.…

This video is so incredibly powerful. It’s short and yes, you do have to subscribe to watch it… but do it. Hank Fortener delivers incredibly powerful insight about how to deal with difficult people. He attributes his biggest failures to his avoidance of difficult conversations. And my favorite quote: “Nobody changes their mind about you…

I hear so many managers talk about how they want to ‘fix’ their employees. They say thing like… I want to make them more motivated. I’d like to figure out how to make them perform at a higher level. How do I get them to be more engaged at work? I want to make them…

I recently purchased Michael Singer’s book, The Surrender Experiment. While I can’t attest to the entire book (as I haven’t read it all yet), I can say that one of the opening paragraphs really resonated and echoes so much of what I talk about with my clients who are dealing with difficult. He writes: “Every day,…

Today . . . I’m sharing thoughts and resources about procrastination. How appropriate that this video by Tim Urban should appear in my FB newsfeed – Inside the mind of a master procrastinator! Watch it. It’s amazing and funny and will likely connect with you, in some way. I’ve been reflecting on my own procrastination. He…

As most of us are already aware, adults often have a difficult time making significant behavior changes. That’s why so many of us stay stuck in negative behavior patterns. It’s not so much that we don’t want to change – it’s more that we don’t understand how to go through that change. The way it…

﻿ I used to manage sales teams – people who were in the recruiting business. For the first six months of that job I wasn’t all that successful. I finally realized that what was blocking my ability to succeed was the way I was thinking about the work I was doing. Those who manage high…

When you are facing something difficult or something you might characterize as a problem, follow these steps. For purposes of illustration I’ll use the example of an employee not meeting performance expectations. Step One: Define the problem. The real problem. Not your ideas or story or worries or opinion about it, but what the problem…

What if it were really true? What if difficult doesn’t exist? I taught a “How to Coach Difficult People” course for managers this week. Each manager came with their example(s) of how employees are difficult. They gossip They interrupt They are disrespectful They are rude They don’t do their work They come to work late…

Let’s say I have a friend who is a difficult employee. Let’s say that same friend thinks her boss is crazy difficult. Let’s say they are both right. (insert snarky grin) Let’s also say that my friend is the top performer in her organization. She’s leaps and bounds more successful than all of her colleagues.…

Ugh. Another mistake. Sometimes I feel like I make them, everyday, all-day-long, all-the-time. Lord knows there’s probably a mistake in this post!!! Do you ever feel like this? Running my own business has made my mistake-making so much more obvious to me. Because… I can’t delegate work. I can’t abdicate work. I must do the…

I’ve just returned from a powerful, long weekend retreat in Santa Barbara. Once a year, the certified coaches from The Life Coach School meet to mastermind and learn from wicked smart teachers and one another. This weekend was no exception. It was a truly moving experience. The snippets of knowledge are too vast to share.…

Recent events in my personal life have, once again, reminded me of the importance of clearly established expectations… Especially if you are in a leadership role. We are all culprits of not setting clear expectations from time-to-time. It’s inevitable. BUT if you lead others, your clarity and communication regarding your expectations is vital. When we aren’t clear,…

I am a perfectionist. I hear this all the time. I’m always curious what that really means. What is perfection anyway? If you are a self-proclaimed perfectionist, I have some questions for you. Think about something you are currently working on that needs to be ‘perfect’ before you are done. Define it. Define what perfection looks…

Lately, I’ve been working with quite a few clients on dealing with, managing, going through various types of change. One thing that strikes me as so interesting is how surprised we are (as humans) when we encounter change. It’s fascinating, right? Everything is always changing and yet, when we encounter change we act surprised. As if…

I work with people every day on how to deal with what’s difficult. The challenge with teaching people about how to deal with difficult people, conversations, and situations (and sometimes all) are any of the following: They want it to be easy They want the difficult person to change. Now. They believe the only way they can…

By Chad Bandy, MBA chad.bandy@ymail.com A big part of leadership is helping an employee get from where they are now to where they want to be in the future. Sometimes our employees do not know where they want to be in the future, which makes development even more difficult! Or, in some cases, we are…

Despite our best efforts to prove otherwise We all share one thing in common at work. We’re all human. As humans, we have feelings. Now, we don’t make a practice of talking about feeeeleings At work If you do you may be considered emotional, weak or soft. So, we’ve created a work culture that doesn’t…

If I’ve heard one common comment from friends and colleagues over the past year it’s been “I’m figuring out what’s next”… Although that seems like such a benign little comment, it isn’t. For many of us, figuring out what’s next has meant so much more: It’s meant losing something we thought we’d keep forever. It…

Written by Chad Bandy chad.bandy@ymail.com The workplace today demands different styles and personalities for vastly different leadership challenges. Transformational leaders are needed to take a team or company in a new direction all the while attempting to survive the turmoil and controversy they create to make change happen. Transitional leaders can be short-term; knowing they…

By Chad Bandy Chad.Bandy@ymail.com Is it possible that the PR agencies for the tooth fairy, Easter bunny, and Santa Claus have been holding emergency damage control teleconferences over Lance Armstrong’s announcement? Is it possible that people will stop believing and questioning whether they are real? Lance Armstrong is yet another sad example in our society…

By Chad Bandy, MBA chad.bandy@ymail.com There are many life-lessons we can learn from competition and sports every day. A recent NFL game provided a wonderful example of how a leader can brand their leadership style, with one decision. There were five seconds left in a heated NFL contest between the New York Giants and the…

People appear to have a tremendous need to be right. What I’m noticing more and more (of myself and others) is that the need to be right, comes with the caveat that others must be wrong. I cannot be right, unless you are wrong. Which, I suppose if you see the world as capitated or…