Discussion

Extreme Picky Eater/Selective Eating disorder

I've been recently dating a new guy, and he's made it known that he's extremely picky. He doesn't eat pasta, has never had a hamburger, or rice, various vegetables... doesn't care for most types of sauce or condiments. ONLY vegetable he likes is corn on the cob. He's never eaten eggs (i.e. scrambled or fried, not including eggs cooked into ingredients such as cake or cookies) So i'm at a loss. I LOVE TO COOK! and i love experimenting and trying new things. I love veggies and i love to eat healthy and find it to be very important to have a variety of a diet. So........... a way for me to show my affection is to cook for others. and also i find it healthier and cheaper than eating out all the time. WHAT THE HECK DO I COOK FOR THIS KID?! i can only make roasted potatoes, corn on the cob and chicken so many times before i get bored. (ive only made it once, and im already not looking forward to making it again)

Ask yourself if it's worth the hassle. You're not his mommy (even though you call him a "kid", perhaps because of his eating ... style), and if those are the only things he likes to eat he might want to learn how to make them himself -- unless you want to spend your immediate future preparing separate meals. So, when COTC is not in season, does he go veggie-free for fall, winter & spring?

Food is not a peripheral thing -- we all have to eat, so if one person lives to eat and the other eats to live, it may not be the most ideal match.

he likes things that are crunchy, spicy etc. and yet still very plain. i noticed that the things he does like are very processed, or just not prepared with your health in mind. Which bothers me. A lot of that bothers me bc over the last 2 years, i've gone through a huge weight loss which i succeeded through my change in diet. He likes pizza, breads, chicken (grilled, fried, plain or with spices/seasoning) Doesn't like mashed potatoes. (its the texture) like french fries. and to be honest, i'm not really sure what else he likes that holds any nutritional value. We went out to eat a few times already.. Pizza, outback, chinese, local restaurant all of which has been things that are either fried, plain, or with fries. No salad, no other veggies... i think you get my point. --- thanks for your reply!!

What a dilemma.....I agree with the others. It may be impossible to go long-term with someone of that temperament. If you are like a lot of us (thankful appreciation and gratitude for good food and company), then just wolfing down whatever to get dinner over with will be intolerable. At least my wife eats whatever I cook, but she takes huge bites and often eats standing up. Eats more than twice as fast as I do. Drives me crazy. Can't imagine if she were picky on top of it!

You are not going to change him. If you enjoy his company enough, find non-food-related things to do together. For the relationship to go forward, you would need to just accept that you will have to accommodate his limited food choices by a combination of (a) eating out so you can both select what you want, (b) preparing separate meals tailored to each of your tastes to consume at home (and I don't mean that all of the cooking should fall to you), and/or (c) by your willingness to at least occasionally eat the limited foods that he eats.

You haven't gone into detail about what he WILL eat so it's premature for readers to assume his diet is really bad. But if it is (corn is a veg only in the sense that wheat, rice, and potatoes are veg, which is to say a starchy carb), think about whether you should be letting yourself in for a future with someone whose poor nutritional habits are very likely to result in chronic illness by the time he is middle-aged.

he likes things that are crunchy, spicy etc. and yet still very plain. i noticed that the things he does like are very processed, or just not prepared with your health in mind. Which bothers me. A lot of that bothers me bc over the last 2 years, i've gone through a huge weight loss which i succeeded through my change in diet. He likes pizza, breads, chicken (grilled, fried, plain or with spices/seasoning) Doesn't like mashed potatoes. (its the texture) like french fries. and to be honest, i'm not really sure what else he likes that holds any nutritional value. We went out to eat a few times already.. Pizza, outback, chinese, local restaurant all of which has been things that are either fried, plain, or with fries. No salad, no other veggies... i think you get my point.

i think you hit the nail right on the head with it resulting in health problems down the road. and obviously, most people date to find someone for the long run, so these are things to think about.