5 myths about relationships

As a society we like to take romantic love and put it up on this cloud of awesome. Something that should be perfect, that we need to just fall into, and something that is going to be easy when we find that “one”. Things are definitely not that simple. Here are a few myths about relationships that need to be cleared up, so that we can work towards healthier relationships.

The One. There is no perfect “one” person for another. Likely there are better matches than others, for sure. I’m not talking about soul mates either, that’s a completely different can of worms. I’m simply saying there is never going to be one person that you get along with all of the time. Where living with them is so easy, and effortless, that you don’t have to put any thought into the relationship. All relationships require work, and you are never going to get along with that person all of the time.

It Shouldn’t Be Work. Actually, yes it should be. Anything worth value requires work. This is true of relationships as well. We aren’t born with the knowledge of what the other person wants and needs, we need to work to discover this. We also need to make sure that we work to take care of them, just as they should be working to take care of us.

There Will Be Sparks. Okay, definitely in the start of a relationship, this might be true. But they won’t always be there. It’s a chemical thing for the most part. However, that doesn’t meant that all relationships start with this fiery passion. Sometimes relationships are nice warm fires that you can just cozy up to. You don’t need to be lighting everything on fire in order to know it’s a perfect match.

You’ll Understand Each Other From the Start. No. Just no. It takes work, and actual communication.

You’ll Never Be Attracted To Anyone Again. Likely yes. Yes you will be. The thing is, attraction is a chemical thing, and a relationship is a choice. So, to say you’re never going to have a chemical attraction again is unlikely. You’ll just have to reaffirm your choice to be in that relationship, and be honest with yourself and your partner.

We dedicate a lot of our lives talking about relationships for a reason, they are complicated. If they went the way they did in the movies then no one would ever cheat, or hurt the person they are with. But they are difficult, and to be in a committed relationship requires work and dedication. It’s a choice we make every day.