Ass Needs TLC

A note found outside a bar/restaurant in Columbus:

I'm really wondering how this note got to the place in the parking lot. I see three scenarios:

Scenario 1 - The Unlucky Lucky PersonPerson A sees Person B in a bar. Person A makes nice with Person B and Person A gives Person B their number. One the way to their car, Person B accidentally drops the number and the love connection is not made.

Scenario 2 - The Unlucky PersonPerson A sees Person B in a bar. Person A thinks Person B would be interested in giving their ass some TLC. Person A hands over the note and Person B takes the first opportunity they have to drop it in the parking lot.

Scenario 3 - The Unlucky IdiotPerson A is desperate to hook up with anything that can read cursive. Person A writes their information down on many sheets of paper and leaves them all over central Ohio in a sad attempt to get laid.

BUT WAIT - I see a fourth scenarioScenario 4 - The Bored HolyJuanGuy can't find content for his website, so he makes up stories, takes photos of random shit and posts it on his website.