The article itself also drew much criticism. Penn drew the piece like a diary entry with a few interview questions tacked on at the end. The wide-ranging internet reactions took aim at Penn’s morally ambiguous stances and fart-sniffing prose. For sure, farts were definitely sniffed in this profile, so here are some of the most outrageous words from old man Penn:

The piece begins with Penn rambling about burner phones, encryption, email, and the “clandestine horror show” of technology:

“At 55 years old, I’ve never learned to use a laptop. Do they still make laptops? No f*cking idea!”

Penn introduces the world to his companion and “brother in arms,” who may or may not exist as a well-traveled bald man: