Dear Gentle Reader,

Many of the following pages have graphic and clear images of the masculine mustache in all its forms, both sublime and grotesque. My intent is not to shock or titillate, but merely to inform on the subject. The Nineteenth Century gave us many things, but above all it was a hotbed of facial hair experimentation and this is but a poor sampling of those many lost forms.

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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

A Treasured Comment From A Treasured Commenter

Oh! all of you poor single men,Don't ever give up in despair,For there's always a chance while there's lifeTo capture the hearts of the fair,No matter what may be your age,You always may cut a fine dash,You will suit all the girls to a hairIf you've only got a moustache,A moustache, a moustache,If you've only got a moustache.

No matter for manners or style,No matter for birth or for fame,All these used to have something to doWith young ladies changing their name,There's no reason now to despond,Or go and do any thing rash,For you'll do though you can't raise a cent,If you'll only raise a moustache!A moustache, a moustache,If you'll only raise a moustache.

Your head may be thick as a block,And empty as any foot-ball,Oh! your eyes may be green as the grassYour heart just as hard as a wall.Yet take the advice that I give,You'll soon gain affection and cash,And will be all the rage with the girls,If you'll only get a moustache,A moustache, a moustache,If you'll only get a moustache.

I once was in sorrow and tearsBecause I was jilted you know,So right down to the riverI ran To quickly dispose of my woe,A good friend he gave me adviceAnd timely prevented the splash,Now at home I've a wife and ten heirs,And all through a handsome moustache,A moustache, a moustache,And all through a handsome moustache.

I'd like to thank Loyal Reader Caitlin GD Hopkins for bringing this delightful (and accurate!) song to my attention. The link also includes a MP3 of the song suitable for downloading. Sadly, the linked MP3 is not played on the traditional Jaw Harp and Concertina that Foster preferred.

I have to note Mr Foster lacks even the slightest hint of a mustache and was unhappily married. To top it all off he died near penny-less. If he only could have grown a fine mustache how different things might have been.