Taylor Swift and foreskins

Taylor Swift was white and plunging at the People’s Choice Awards earlier this month -- click here for a refresher. She worked a similar look last night in Spain at the 40 Principales Awards. And of course everyone is assuming that her low-cutness is a message to Harry Styles. Supposedly she flew to London earlier this week to see him but he refused. And I’d be down with that version of events only...the source is sh-t. As are the sources reporting that she broke up with him because he’s not circumcised which...

We need to talk about this because I’ve seen both, hood and no hood, and it doesn’t make a difference to me so, forgive me, but I don’t understand the squeamishness that some people have towards seeing or imagining a dick that isn’t cut. Cut or uncut, it’s not exactly the most attractive part of the male anatomy.

I was late to the foreskin party because I have no interest in children and only recently heard about the big ass debate among you parents about cutting or not cutting. And apparently the “no cut” movement is gaining momentum because more and more people, including Russell Crowe, I guess, consider cutting to be “barbaric” and insist that there’s a lot of trauma that can result from the procedure. Some are so, um, intense about the issue that they’ve even started an organisation called the Intact Society, or something, fighting for the right of the foreskin.

Do you know anyone who suffers from Post Traumatic Circumcision Disorder?

But since I’m not a parent, I’m not allowed to have an opinion either way. If I WERE allowed to have an opinion though, I’d say it’s up to the parents, and done. Do we really have to be arguing about it? And besides, there’s an easier, smarter way to encourage people -- men! -- to protect the sanctity of the foreskin. Instead of yelling about torture and savage practices, which dudes never want to hear about anyway, why not make the campaign purely about sensation, straight up?

According to sex experts, having foreskin INCREASES SEXUAL PLEASURE because it acts like a stroking mechanism. In other words, when a man with foreskin is inside a woman, he’s getting double pumped, sort of.

See?

Now turn that into a campaign geared towards fathers, I guarantee the Foreskin Protection Act will become law.

Which still doesn’t clarify whether or not Taylor Swift is into foreskin but, really, do you really believe she’d care enough to tell Harry Styles to go get it taken care of? This is a girl who willingly went undercover and dirty with John Mayer. After John Mayer and all the piss and sh-t that comes with that, you think she actually cares about a cock sleeve? Please.