10 November 2011

NHL Road Trip 2011

More like a homestand than a road trip this year (bar one trip
to the minors), but here is my
usual comprehensive, analytical coverage of what promised to be the Rangers' six game
losing streak.

Game #1: Toronto Maple Leafs 4-2 New York Rangers

After finding my seat easily despite apocalyptic warnings about the
layout of the partially-renovated Madison Square Garden, I find myself
sat right behind somebody with the unfortunate appearance of a homeless
Barry Melrose.

I then witness the impressive feat of a man managing to dump a beer over his own head after stumbling on the stairs.

The Rangers controversially opt to introduce the players
individually at the home opener - not something that has occurred every
year, mostly for boo-related reasons. Accordingly, nobody gets booed
(yet).

Apparently, a huge pro-Avery, anti-Tortorella banner is unveiled
somewhere in the crowd. Either I completely miss it, or it was behind
me. (Apparently, the banner was subsequently banned by the tolerant MSG
staff.)

Against type so far this season, the Rangers actually put together a
decent first period to lead 1-0, also having two other efforts chalked
off for reasonably marginal contact with a very shaky looking Jonas
Gustavsson in the Leafs' net.

While I did not feel the need to test any of the new facilities, I
can only assume the bathrooms and concessions are of the highest
standard since I was seemingly the only person in my section to leave
their seat fewer than 18 times a period to visit the concourse while
play was in progress.

Entirely not against type so far this season, the Rangers decide to
exploit a very shaky looking Jonas Gustavsson in the Leafs' net by
giving him practically no work at all the rest of the way, while Henrik
Lundqvist allows a few weak goals for the first time in a while, despite
also stopping two Phil Kessel breakaways.

Patient and moderate as they are, a sizeable chunk of the home fans
use the late third period to start a "We want Avery" chant, seizing the
opportunity to remind everyone that a lack of defensive depth and
completely dysfunctional start from most of the point producing forwards
can only be corrected by the return of a 3rd/4th line forward who
scored three goals last year and the coach doesn't trust.

The Leafs' fourth goal from noted sniper Mike Brown with six minutes
to go sees the New Transformed Exits brought to you by Chase at Madison
Square Garden adequately tested for the first time.

Next up: An afternoon game against hated rival, the superstar-laden Ottawa Senators. I can hear the booing already.

---

Game #2: Ottawa Senators 5-4 (SO) New York Rangers

An unseasonal October snowstorm means dangerous conditions have to
be navigated on my journey to the game - dopey 5th Avenue tourists
wielding umbrellas in the manner of a blindfolded Dan Carcillo.

I'm seated directly in front of one of the press boxes, tonight
featuring legendary former Leafs GM, John Ferguson Jr, now scouting for
the Sharks. I successfully sell my hot dog to him for $300. Not sure
why I need a no-trade clause though.

Line-up news: MSG fan favourites, Erik Christensen and Wojtek Wolski
are rewarded for their consistent work ethic and gritty play with the
assignment next to Marián Gáborik for at least one shift (and probably
one shift).

A predictably terrible first period from the Rangers sees them
heavily outshot and 1-0. One relatively quiet and quickly aborted "We
want Avery" chant results.

Not for the first time (nor the last), the between periods puck
shooting contest sees the participant mercilessly booed for his repeated
failures. He still has a better than 50% chance of playing on the
Rangers top line for the rest of the game though.

Momentum shifts after Zenon Konopka pleases his many fantasy owners
by getting five plus a game for performing his own renovation of the MSG
glass using Artem Anisimov's face as raw materials (though the hit was
actually not that bad, if at all). The Rangers shock the world by
putting away two (two) PPGs on the major penalty.

Despite another patchy performance at best, the Rangers work
themselves into a 4-1 lead with eight minutes left in the game, the
third goal by Gáborik from a great pass by Derek Stepan being the pick
of the bunch.

Despite...something, the Rangers then work themselves into a 4-4 tie
with three minutes left as, shockingly, the strategy of panicking and
spending the rest of the game chasing the puck in their own end fails to
pay dividends.

Milan Michálek scores the only goal in the shootout, the building erupts with joyous emotion.

Next up: An easily winnable game against perennial
Western Conference doormat, the San Jose Sharks. Right here on Versus!
Let's hope Milbury is in a Swedish prison wearing a visor attendance.

---

Game #3: San Jose Sharks 2-5 New York Rangers

Right off the opening faceoff, Brandon Prust and Ryane Clowe
"tangle". Approximately 10 minutes of pirouetting and helmet punching
ends with the pair almost landing on top of Pierre McGuire in his usual
spot licking Mike Richards' shoes between the benches.

News of Sean Avery's impending recall and the Rangers not actually
losing at the time make the (mostly failed) attempts to start the "We
want Avery" chant more confusing than ever.

Ryan McDonagh: 1-0. Scott Gomezhahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Brandon Dubinsky and Derek Stepan somehow exploit Colin White's
legendary footspeed to make it 2-0 in the first; the Rangers looking
strangely competent.

However, it's tied midway through the second period, the tying goal
by Logan Couture coming at the end of a shift of six or seven minutes of
the crack Jeff Woywitka-Steve Eminger pairing being trapped in their
own end by the Sharks' top line.

Not tied for long as, befitting of a player who looks like Joe Sakic
for one game every two months (Joe Sakic's wife for the rest), Erik
Christensen makes two great passes on goals by Ryan Callahan and Artem
Anisimov.

In the final minute of the second period, Callahan makes a
spectacular stretch/dive from behind the net to poke home a rebound and
give the Rangers the unassailable three-goal lead that has not been
assailed by a Rangers opponent in, oh...two days.

The third period is largely a non-event. Shame.

In front of me tonight:

Firstly, your typical MSG BlackBerry Man. Not even a glance towards
the ice during the entire first period. Doesn't return to his seat for
the third.

Replaced in the third by a fan in a Patrick Marleau jersey wearing
an "Occupy Madison Square Garden" sign around his neck. Loses marks for
not sitting with a friend in a Jeremy Roenick costume holding a bag of
guts.

After the game, Joe Thornton bizarrely (given he was fairly
anonymous in defeat) decides to call the Rangers the softest team the
Sharks played on their road trip. With the two teams not meeting again
this season (neither team has a chance of winning the Western Conference
Final series), this appears to be Jumbo Joe's Halloween equivalent of
knocking on the Rangers' dressing room door and running away.

Next up: Logistics and apathy permitting, a two games in
one day odyssey spanning a morning (!) AHL clash in Bridgeport, CT - now
not featuring the star Avery attraction - and an evening (zzz)
dull-fest in tropical Newark, NJ.

---

A travel snafu prevented my planned attendance at the Devils-Leafs
game in the evening. I hope Marty Brodeur's return performance was as
amusing for those in person as it appeared to be on TV.

Game #4: Connecticut Whale 3-4 (OT) Bridgeport Sound Tigers

A 90-minute train journey from Manhattan for an 11am faceoff. Not my usual kind of trip.

The reason for the early start: Some sort of schoolkids promotion.
So, a few thousand kids in the stands make the atmosphere one part
hockey game, nine parts Justin Bieber concert.

A completely indecipherable P.A. system and unfamiliarity with many
of the players will make it tougher than normal to keep up. And to know
when the building is being evacuated.

Line-up news:

The Whale are now Avery-less (must've been publicised somewhere),
but still feature recent Ranger demotions Tim Erixon, Kris Newbury and
Mats Zuccarello-Aasen. The mini-Fishsticks include Nino Niederreiter
and the overwhelmingly talented Trevor Gillies.

The Whale's first goal (Jonathan Audy-Marchessault from Mats
Zuccarello-Aasen and Tim Erixon) smashes the record for most letters
combining on a goal I've seen.

Gillies (who doesn't appear to even get a regular shift at this
level) takes an appropriately dumb penalty, leading to the stuff of
nightmares: Wade Redden as the PP quarterback.

The between period T-shirt toss produces a painfully shrill noise.

A fight between Micheal (sic) Haley and Stu Bickel is broken up
almost as soon as it starts, while doing so, the linesman presumably
screaming "Won't somebody please think of the children?!"

The Whale take a 3-1 lead early in the third, the goal (Jonathan
Audy-Marchessault from Mats Zuccarello-Aasen and John Mitchell) smashing
the record for most letters combining on a goal I've seen, if falling
just short on the syllables equivalent.

Showing impressive dedication to becoming Rangers, the Whale then
blow their lead over the last 11 minutes and lose in OT, the Tigers' Tim
Wallace completing his hat-trick on the winner.

Next up: Back to MSG for yet another intense clash for the Rangers against a hated divisional rival, the Anaheim Ducks.

---

Game #5: Anaheim Ducks 1-2(SO) New York Rangers

Back in the cheap moderately less obscenely expensive seats for this one. Hence, not surrounded by corporate no-shows / BlackBerry idiots.

Instead, I'm sat next to somebody who talks loudly non-stop for the
entire game, none of which is about the game or hockey generally, except
for: "I ****ing hate the ****ing Montréal Canadiens. Not only are they from Montréal, but they are ****ing Canadians."

After a pretty poor game between the two teams in Stockholm four
weeks ago, much of this one is similarly uneventful, the Ducks mustering
only two shots in the first period.

The Rangers open the scoring through the increasingly Paul
Coffey-like Jeff Woywitka, before the moustache-free George Parros is
again engaged in a not-at-all-staged fight on the restart, the Bahama
Bomber, Andre Deveaux taking the place that Mike Rupp filled in
Stockholm and proving less like a Parros punchbag.

A more eventful third period sees the Ducks carry most of the play,
Ryan Callahan missing a shorthanded breakaway with no Duck skater within
60 feet of him (his only breakaway/shootout move failing him), and both
goalies playing well.

A fairly crazy OT session somehow ends without a winner, before the
completely unexpected sight of Marián Gáborik (2-for-19 career record
coming in) scoring in the shootout and Bobby Ryan this time not fanning
the final attempt past Lundqvist.

Next up: Having not played a Canadian team for an
incredible stretch of two games, the Rangers face the ****ing Montréal
****ing Canadiens. Will the MSG crowd get the chance to shower the
usual acclaim on returning hero, Scott Gomez?

---

Game #6: Montréal Canadiens 3-5 New York Rangers

Beaucoup trop de partisans des Habitants ici.

I'm surprised to see that somebody actually purchased one of these monstrosities:

(Meaning the style of jersey. Nobody would be stupid enough to pay lots of money for an actual Gomez, right?)

Bad news for the Canadiens Rangers is that Gomez is
still injured and will not play. The Rangers do ice the best two
players involved in the Gomez trade: Ryan McDonagh and No Gomez.

An interesting start, as Mike Blunden flattens a speeding Brandon
Dubinsky by the Habs' bench, sparking a huge get-together. "Clean" hit
from Blunden, had it not been for the fact that he jumped off the bench
early to make the hit.

After Ryan Callahan and Blunden fight and a separate one between
Mike Sauer and Petteri Nokelainen (the latter two receiving game
misconducts), we emerge with a 5-on-3 PP for two minutes to the Rangers,
on which Erik Christensen capitalises.

Well into the game, we finally see a shift for returning hero, Sean
Avery. First time I've heard grown men squeal with excitement at MSG.

The first period ends 3-0 Rangers, the third goal a particularly
good one, a shot block by Dan Girardi leading to a rush the other way,
capped by a great pass from Derek Stepan to a streaking Michael Del
Zotto to beat Carey Price.

As expected, the Habs score early in the second period and pull to
within a goal midway through the period on a 5-on-3 PP of their own,
courtesy of Brian Gionta's wonky sense of balance as much as anything
worth penalising.

After surviving more than one shot off the post and some dangerous
rushes from the apparently not-dead-yet Erik Cole, things become more
comfortable for the Rangers as Brad Richards wires one past Price late
in the second.

The game tightens up considerably in the final frame, but a frantic
finish is ensured once Gionta get his customary goal against the Rangers
with two minutes to go.

Captain Callahan eases nerves with the empty-netter, the puck
amusingly being followed into the goal by Garden crowd favourite, P.K.
Subban, spinning on his derrière.

Next up: The homestand and my trip ends with the visit of Dystugien Bufflin and the Jetlanta Thrasherpegs.

---

Game #7: Winnipeg Jets 0-3 New York Rangers

Predictably, far fewer Jets jerseys in the crowd than there were
Canadiens jerseys last night. The fans must have opted to spend all
their ticket money to sit under a leaking ceiling on Long Island.
Understandable choice.

During the anthems, somebody unfurls a banner reading: "2012 END FED
RON PAUL". I'm not heavily into U.S. politics, but it seems odd that
Ruslan Fedotenko's contract status would be such a prominent issue for
Republicans.

After the excitement of last night's game, it seems back-to-back
games for both teams is showing. The first period is unremarkable,
notable only for one crazy sequence in Marty Biron's goalmouth in which
the puck is stopped on the goal-line two or three times and ends up with
every player on the ice bar Jets goalie Ondřej Pavelec either in or
right around the crease. Dustin Byfuglien does a passable impression of
an NFL fullback leaping over the pile at the goal-line, but cannot
force the football to break the plane.

The second period is almost equally unremarkable, notable only for Derek Stepan's PP goal to open the scoring.

A bit more interesting in the third. Three quick Jets penalties,
give the Rangers the opportunity to get booed for failing to score on an
extended 5-on-3 PP. (Actually not that bad a PP - Pavelec mostly
responsible for the lack of scoring.) Then Marián Gáborik converts on a
2-on-1 rush led by the recently excellent Derek Stepan.

Late Jets pressure is pretty sporadic and Gáborik seals the game in
the last seconds with a lob wedge backhand empty netter. Biron earns
his first shutout as a Ranger and continues his strong start to the
season.

Signs of the tenuous strength of the financial support provided by
Winnipeg fans are revealed when two of them duck the fare barriers at
the crowded subway station rather than face the outrageous $2.50 cost.

So, another winning record for the Rangers during my trip. They
look a far better team than the one that struggled throughout the
majority of the seven-game international road trip that preceded the
homestand, if still a bit fortunate to earn as many points as they did.