Tuesday, April 19, 2005

I know everyone has embarassing moments. However, most people have only one like every year or even spread out into one every 2-3 years. Not me.

My life is a plethera of embarassing moments strung together by akward silences.

An ex-boyfriend (if you can call him that, I did break up with him over a text message - but what can I say, like I was going to fly the 30 minutes to do it in person?!?) Didn't belive me. After the first date, he was a beliver.

I would write them all out, but It would take up to many pages.

so here's a just the top ten from work in the last few weeks (umm maybe days) : (this is not for the weak at heart)

1) last weeks unannounced 'fire hose like' explosive puking, in uniform, in front of 20 other crew members and a bazillion passangers in the middle of the Denver airport. It was virtually miles from a bathroom (that airport is too big for it's own good!). I had no warning, and felt fine before and after. Just a little present to keep me humble.

2) doing the whole Inflight demonstration(just a little charades we flight attendants do before flights for you lucky passangers) without any of the little props (safty card, O2 mask, seat belt) and not noticing until I was almost done....Don't ask...it was early....

3) later that day...getting the giggles when trying to do the inflight announcements...to the point of laughing so hard, for so long the passangers looked scared. I couldn't finish and another F/A (short for Flight Attendant) had to for me.

4) Getting the same uncontrolable laughter every day, when I do the announcements.Without fail.

5) at least a few times a week (or day) I annouce the wrong city, timezone, or country (and I only fly in the US) on landing.

6) bending over to get snacks out, other F/A giggles and tells me my skirt rode up and I flashed the whole flight.

7) In the same vein, standing on the Jet way with the cover off, there was no one around but my one of my best friends and fellow F/A. It was a beautiful day. All the rampers and pilots were no where to be seen. We were joking around and I was showing her the run in my stocking (where my butt hits my leg) as I danced around on the Jetway (in my defence, the uniform dress that they gave me barely covers my butt anyway) . Later, as the passangers boarded, a few guys commented on my lovely dancing, I looked out of the plane and saw a giant window in the boarding area overlooking the very same Jetway I was practicly naked on. Oops, I guess I gave all my passangers a show. One creepy old guy mentioned he took digital pictures but wouldn't show me.

ok, top seven. I am getting tired. Both physically, and just tired of being so darn self-effacing.