Whose World is this Wednesdays: “Pee-Wee’s Bigger Adventure!”

Ma, don’t read this post. I repeat…Momma, don’t read this post. Mainly because I’m about to say some things that will offend your ears. I know you didn’t teach me to talk like this but…THIS is warranted!

What in the Tennessee Williams is happening to American Theater? I just read on the Playbill website that several old ass ’80s and ’90s films have been turned into musicals on Broadway like Sister Act (which I have discussed on this blog), The Addams Family, Mary Poppins, Elf, Spider Man and now my intelligent Circuiteers…drum roll please? Pee-Wee ‘s Big Adventure!

After I let out a major BOMB of WTF? I started researching. My little angry theater heart doesn’t forget ANYTHING. And then I found it…yep, the major dutch oven! Paul Ruebens aka Pee-Wee Herman, the beloved ambiguously gay drifter from the TV show and films was a sex offender. That’s right peeps…he had done the ultimate of nastiness. This “Comeback Kid” showed his pee-wee to a group of people in a movie theater while masturbating. This same perv voluntarily listed himself as a sex offender to gain a plea bargain when he was caught with child pornography on his personal computer.

I have to say this…and I can’t abbreviate it but WHAT THE FUCK? Are we THAT hard pressed for entertainment that we can’t find legitimate plays or musicals by graduate students in these universities? Hell, I’d take an unsolicited script over this trash.

You can read all of the sordid details of Reubens’ case which could read like a drama for the stage. But the reality is, how can ANYONE have faith in a genre of art that decides to support this man and his destructive behavior? We would rather settle for a washed up has been rather than a new voice?

This is blatantly disrespectful to the American audience. Someone knew that we, as an American people, forget things. He was absolved of his crime, he paid the time-let’s move on. We just love toastin’ the douche bags! I’m not going to even talk about how we Lindsey Lohan these stars. That’s not what this post is about.

But come on people…Pee-Wee fuckin’ Herman? The Tequila dancin’ dude who traveled cross-country meeting Large Marge and a band of Satan’s Helpers?

Let’s take a moment to look at the humor in all of this. Broadway is literally laughing all the way to the bank. They have pacified American audiences. Broadway is a business. It requires no actually thought to watch his films (Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is still a classic) and I’m sure the play for that matter, so why not sell tickets for $67-227 bucks? Maybe you’ll get a glimpse of him coming out of the theater?

There’s really nothing to believe in anymore. Do we see what’s happening to American Theater? We have trivialized the art, and pimped both Ruebens and his loyal followers. Broadway is losing the prestige. This outright sickens me. I feel like I took one-without any lube.

Why the fuck does this man have fans? In the clip about his comeback he says he brought this show back for the kids? I wouldn’t let this man get two feet to my child. The show is NOT for kids. I repeat, this show is NOT for kids. Is this dude on drugs? Are we? I’m not buying this one bit! I guess Antoine Dobson’s quote truly works in this regard. Somebody needs to “Hide ya wife, Hide ya kids! They rapin’ everybody ’round here!”

2 Comments

Hide your kids for sure! That’s beyond sad! It’s disgusting. It’s amazing how Lou the neighborhood pedophile would never recover from something like this, but a celebrity can. We are definitely living in the cult of personality.