I feel a little vulnerable writing this blog. But then ... f**k it. I am a textile and fashion designer and I believe in the power of stories. I capture stories in my textiles and I turn them into items, such as scarves and tops. One of my collections is called F**k It! and while I never though I would design a pattern like that, now it makes sense to me.

I started my business last year and oh my was I scared! Fear has stopped me from doing so many things in my life. All of the moments I didn't do something because of fear could fill up days and weeks, maybe even months of my life. You know all the times when ... you don't not voice your ideas, you don't not approach a person you think is interesting, you stay in the same old pattern because it's just fine. While I was thrilled about my new creative adventure, you should see me shake as I drove to a local shop to offer my designs. I almost turned around and went home. As time passed, I got tired of all of this fear nonsense.

I needed a boost, a reminder of my inner courage. So, I recorded the words "F**k It!" as they seemed to be a little more convincing than just "Go for it!" ... I used the image of the sound wave as a textile pattern and sewed a scarf out of the fabric. I wore it in new situations; I rushed into my closet to put it on as a potential business connection called my cell phone. For a little bit, that scarf became my signature look. I din't tell anybody about the idea behind my design; I didn't feel the need.

But then all of the moments when my friends stopped themselves from something new kept catching my attention. And I thought why not share my little trick. Let's be clear about what this textile pattern is not. It's not "Oh, f**k it. I don't care." It's not "I can't do much about this. It's always been that way." So, what is it about? It is about experience; it is about letting yourself have space for experience. Because there is always space for something new and unexpected and because you are worth changes that enrich you and your life.

Fear won't go away but I am not sure it needs to. It can hang around, just not rule our days. A friend of mine asked me to make a blouse for her out of the fabric. When we chatted about it, she said: "Oh, it will be a good conversation starter." And indeed, it is! So, say it with me ... F**k It!