Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Let Us Have a Little Talk

They won't exactly be taking care of us when we're old, no that won't happen, but they might just be young enough to work for us or be our attorneys. But the kids in highschool have decided that it's perfectly acceptable to add another step to the relationship process. This step is called "TALKING," and it involves getting to know people through texting and hanging out before actually going out or screwing or what have you. We find this to be extremely upsetting and discouraging to pathetic, and was made solely ballsless girls and boys everywhere. The worst part is that this has caught on, adults and some young adults have picked this up and adopted it, like a scrawny cat that nobody wants. This is a mistake with severe consequences. You can all burn Pride &Prejudice, your diaphragm (much less action for you), Breakfast at Tiffany's, Aladdin, Gone with the Wind, The notebook, Pretty Woman, My Fair Lady, Titanic, Cinderella, Romeo and Juliet, and forget about fate. Breakups hurt more because you wasted all that time, and most times, people don't really want to talk at all. In fact, since you don't really have a choice anymore, you are exactly like Anne Boleyn (that worked out very well for her), but without the title. Congrats children of America, you are bigger idiots than we thought!

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