Florida Man Sues Wikileaks Over The Personal Distress It Caused Him

from the enterprisingly-wasteful dept

While the US government is struggling to come up with something (anything!) to bring Julian Assange to court over, one man in Florida has taken matters into his own hands. Slashdot points us to the news that a guy in Florida, David Pitchford, has apparently sued Wikileaks for all the distress it has caused him, claiming that the leaks have resulted in "hypertension," "depression" and "living in fear of being stricken by another heart attack and/or stroke" as a result of living "in fear of being on the brink of another nuclear [sic] WAR."' The full complaint is embedded below, and it's quite amusing. He's also afraid that others must be similarly suffering, and the impact of this will be to "diminish the Medicaid benifits [sic] that the Plainiff [sic] Depennds [sic] apon [sic] for health care in that the United States is Out of money." Mr. Pitchford is demanding (respectfully) $150 million dollars (well, "dollors" according to him).

According to the Superkuh blog, Mr. Pitchford in the past has tried similar tactics in suing Osama bin Laden. Of course, he also threatened to sue Superkuh for distress, after the blogger indicated he did not agree with Pitchford's lawsuits. It appears he likes to sue. Pitchford indicated that he didn't believe "any internet based medium could be a real member of the press." Another amusing bit was when Superkuh pointed out Wikileaks' relationship with various large media organizations such as the Guardian. In the lawsuit complaint, you can see that Pitchford claims that "after exhaustive research" he has determined that Wikileaks and Assange "have no known association with any known jourlism [sic] entity with the exception of that which is self proclaimed." You would think that an association with The Guardian or other major newspapers (including, in the past, the NY Times) would point out the problem with this line of argument. Instead, Pitchford suggested he planned to sue The Guardian too. Oh, and the Associated Press as well, which is guilty of talking about the leaks. In other words, don't expect this lawsuit to get any traction at all.

This reminds me...

Back in my high school days, I was a HUGE fan of Adam Carrola. As such, I used to listen to Love Line on a nightly basis. There was a stretch there when Adam used to do a segment called "Germany or Florida" in which callers had to call in with stories of immense stupidity, vulgarity, or obscenity. Once the horrific act was on display, Adam would have to guess whether the story occurred in Germany or Florida, as Adam long considered Germany to be a haven of weirdness and evil.

re: Pitchford

Finally

He may not be a soldier, but at least we now have proof (PROOF I say!) that the Wikileaks cables are endangering someone. Hmm... I guess I'll go hang up the whole "please provide proof of increased risk" thing now, huh.

He's suing for a total of 150 million USD in the complaint, but at Gizmodo.com they have a fourth page beyond what's embedded here; at the bottom of that page (where it's noted the filing is 'pro se'), it says "Demand 1.5 mil injunctive".

I love stuff like this, 'Guess the guys intentions', is he bored? having a laugh? greedy beyond measure? or just plain bat-shit-crazy?

Every time I read TechDirt I wonder if I shouldn't take out a patent for 'System of Inhaling Air using muscles to pull a diaphragm below lungs' Then every one who breaths must give me money.
I was also wondering, does anyone hold copyright on the 3 primary colors?

Scientology criminal

This clown sounds like a Scientology criminal. The Scientology crime syndicate also tries to sue everybody on the Internet who mentions the name "Xenu" or "Body Thetans" or brings up their murder of Lisa McPherson and no end of lunacy.

Are you should this guy's name isn't Helena Kobrin? Kendrick Moxon? David Miscavige? Or some other well-known Scientology crime boss?

Re: How many million dollors?!

Re: Re:

I think Mike has a problem in intentionally misspelling nuclear. It happens to the best of us. I have to focus to spell it the way it appears in the complaint as nucliar (sic). I think even George Bush would have trouble with that spelling.

Re: Re: Re:

Hmm. I actually assumed it was in reference to the word "another," considering that we have yet to have even one nuclear war*. Can't "[sic]" also denote factual inaccuracy? I might've learned it incorrectly.