I have been trying very hard to stop eating fast food. I do very well on this except for breakfast.

Cooking at home, if not fun, at least can be interesting. Seriously. I have set the stove on fire, grabbed numerous hot items, cut myself and 75% of the time have the kids wishing I would have just made eggs.

Tonight...I decide I am exhausted because The Bug has the flu and per her doctors orders has been banished to her room until she hasn't run a fever for 24 hours therefore leaving The Grumpy Teen and I at her beck and call. I have now added to my "Things You Must Teach Your Children" list that though it is ok to have the urge to want to throw ice cream at someone because you are deathly ill and it's that time of the month and you wanted the caramel one not the vanilla one, you can't actually act on it. Because apparently, for my children at least, that doesn't fall under the common sense category.

Anyway, back to the I'm exhausted and I decide we will have fast food for dinner because I have worked all day, spent my lunch hour talking The Grumpy Teen out of murder while picking up the living room and folding laundry, all on very little sleep and at this point don't have it in me to care about their arteries.

We pass by Burger King because the line is long. We pass by McDonalds because that line is even longer. We decide on Wendy's because no one is there. RED FLAG!!! Or so you would think. Maybe there is a reason my kids lack in the common sense department...

I pull up to the menu/speaker. You can't see anything because they haven't turned the light on so here is how it goes...

Drive Thru Teenager: Can I take your order?

Me: Can I have one second please?

Silence...

I squint at the menu...

75 seconds later...

RUDE ARSE DRIVE THRU TEENAGER: *smacks her lips* I said can I take your order?

Me: *dumbfounded* Actually no you can't.

As I drive off I see her look at me through her little window and she says on the speaker...

Have a nice day!

I throw the car in reverse.

Park.

The Grumpy Teen: Please mom don't!

Me:Any other day, but not today! Just sit here a minute...

I go in all gung ho to say:

Me:Manager, can you step over here with me to your fingerprinted and I can only imagine whatever else might be on it window?

We walk to it so I can show her McDonalds....

Me:Do you ever wonder why people are willing to wait in that long arse line for food instead of seeing that you have no wait and come here? It is because you suck. So now that I have helped inform you of new knowledge could you do the same for me? Why would your drive-thru slacker act as if I am wasting her time WHEN YOU HAVE NO CUSTOMERS? I can forgive the fact that you are trying to save on your light bill by not turning the signs on because YOU HAVE NO CUSTOMERS, why can she not forgive that I need a minute to squint at your unlit menu? Why is she in that big of a hurry? Is scrubbing the toilets that important because it cant be that she is anxious to wait on other customers BECAUSE YOU HAVE NONE! Are you seeing my point, Manager? If you want that kind of line *I tap on the window pointing to McDonalds and then wipe my finger on my jeans* you might want to have a class on how to be nice to the, that's right....NOT MANY..., customers you do have. I'm going to go get in line somewhere else now but you put that in your Frosty and slurp it.

Instead after another teenage twerp went and got the manager I simply said:

If your drive thru girl is not wanting to wait for people to order, you might want to turn the sign's light on. It's kind of hard to see in the dark.

Yes, my imagination is way more fierce than my actual self. It's not so much I'm worried what they thought but more the look on The Grumpy Teen's face when I got out of the car that kept me in check. But let me just warn you now, when they are grown and raising their own families....IT IS ON, DRIVE THRU TWIT AS I PREDICT YOU WILL STILL BE THERE!!