In 2010 I didn’t choose a One Word. Instead my life and emotions took hold and my emotions decided my Word should be fear. Fear seemed to take up residence in so many areas of my life. I felt at times as if i was being defined by fear. It took hold of me in areas it never had. So I decided I needed to be defined by a different word. A word completely opposite of fear: Trust.

For 2011 I decided that I wanted to choose a word ahead of time rather than let one decide to define me. The more I prayed about it the more I felt I was called to learn to live in a state of grace. I am extremely impatient with people. I often refuse to give them the benefit of the doubt. I so often fail to have grace on them, but choose to bestow my silent judgment.

I want to be defined by grace.

Here are some of the things I’m planning to do over the next 12 months that will hopefully help me become this definition:

Memorize Scripture. I used to be “really” good at memorizing scriptures when I had to for school. Now that I’m an adult. Well…. So one of the things I want to do is to memorize verses that speak of having grace & grace being upon us. I am planning one verse/passage a month. So that is 12 passages by 12.31.11. Here are the verses in no particular order:

At the beginning of each month I’ll share which passage I’m memorizing.

Read books. [links are Amazon Affiliate] There are a lot of really smart people out there. People that God reveals Himself to and gives them an understanding of spiritual things. These really smart people write books. I am planning to read the following books over the next year:

On Monday, January 03rd I will have my first One Word (click the button below for more info) post of the year. I’ve commented on Twitter that God is already trying to work it in my life. Have a great week, I’ll see you on the 03rd or on Twitter.

Jenny has become one of my closest confidants over the last few months. She’s someone I text when I’m battling a bad mood. We have Skype dates and though our pups have never met, they’re best pupfriends. Jenny’s blog. Jenny’s Twitter.

We’ve talked this week about online community.

Is it real?

Is it sustainable?

Does it make a difference and if so, how?

We have heard personal stories, watched beautiful connections develop, and listened as people have expressed why they feel online community is real or at least real to them.

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Yet is online community practical?

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Because at the end of the day, as much as we love the mooshy-gooshy feel good stuff, we all have lives to live, mouths to feed, and tasks to complete.

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My left-brain wants to know if online community works.

I want to know if online community makes an impact in our practical, everyday life?

I believe that it can and it is.

True Biblical community is supposed to be about life change and life change is exactly what is happening in these online communities.

When Tam received a new bed from her online community and she began sleeping through the night for the first time in years.

When Elora and Russ shared on their blog some of their very-real financial struggles and watched as a community of folks showed up with practical assistance.

When Alece stepped off the plane into the awaiting arms of an online community she was meeting IRL for the first time… and then watched as God used that community to support her through the crucible of a valley-experience AND came together at a bloggers meet up to raise funds for Thrive Africa, a ministry she started in Africa.

When Jenni and Brian renewed their vows surrounded by several of their best friends – who two years prior had only been known to them across the blogosphere.

And as several of us have made the trek overseas on mission, how a loving online community came together to pray for our journeys and do guest posts while we were gone.

True biblical community is what the church is called to be to each other.

Church is happening online.

It is powerful. It is real. It is good…

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In closing… I will share my unfolding story of the power of online community in creating life-change.

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I am a regular reader at the Ragamuffin community, not only because Carlos (@loswhit aka Los) is hilarious and impacting simultaneously, but also because the group of Ragamuffins there are really good peeps.

For the last several months I have been looking, praying, researching for a DSL camera because I want to be able to capture the essence of “moments” whether they are on the field in Africa or in my back-yard.

Two hours later – I had purchased a Nikon D700 and it is on its way to me TODAY!

Just in time for my Burundi trip next week

With camera case, strap, and a gogillian memory cards thrown in out of the goodness of Jay’s heart.

All at a great discount “Because I was a fellow Ragamuffin”

Not once was I worried that he was a scammer, because he was a part of this great community I loved {Plus, knowing Los and the community, if Jay was a scammer… the community would have united in protest!}

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So now I have the big-girl camera I’ve been looking for just in time for my Burundi trip at a cost that I could not have even gotten on e-bay.

A practical-solution to an every day need.

A solution generated by online community.

An event that will undoubtedly be transformational as I step into this new season of my life.

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Does online community work?

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Yes.

All the believers were united in heart and mind. And they felt that what they owned was not their own, so they shared everything they had. Acts 4.32 (NLT)

I connected with Jen through Alece. It was through a video stream interview with Alece that I made my first Twitter friend in OZ. I love the how she shares her experiences over miles/kilometers of oceans. Jen’s Blog. Jen’s Twitter.

Bloggy-Twitterverse Interwebs

I didn’t tell my husband.In fact, I didn’t let him know anything of it for about 6 months.I created an entire group of friends without my husbands knowledge. It was my own little world.

Social media isa good thing. However, like a lot of good things, it can also be used poorly. My decision not to let Adam know about it caused a HUGE issue when he finally found out. He never made me shut any of it down (though we did agree to cut off all ties with one person, but that’s a another story for a different time) but he was hurt, and for a long time was totally against social media as a viable source of community and friendship.I got the whole gamut…

You have real friends too, you know

How do you know they are genuine?

How can you feel so deeply about them? You don’t know them.

He felt I was hiding myself away from “real life”. That I was hiding behind a persona… and that so was everyone else.

1. Being or occurring in fact or actuality
2. True and actual; not imaginary, alleged, or ideal
3. Genuine and authentic; not artificial or spurious

But the one I loved the most is

Existing objectively in the world regardless of subjectivity or
conventions of thought or language

People who don’t use social media don’t getsocial media.Simply because you can’t sit on their couch and talk doesn’t mean the friendships are any less real and genuine.

I talked with these people on AIM (seriously, does anyone still use that? I think it died when Xanga did) all the time. We left comments on each others posts. We edified and uplifted. We mourned and rejoiced as needed. We were as authentic, if not more so, as face to face relationships. I prayed for them just as much as I did the ones I could hang out with.

I heard it mentioned once, that friends made through social media, whether by blog comments, forums or twitter (to name a few) are just the modern day pen-pals.

LOVE that. It makes so much sense.

As an introvert, I have many acquaintances, but not a lot of real friends. (In fact, Jenni totally called me out on this the other day) Walking up to someone I don’t know and starting a conversation is the very last thing I would do in “real life”. With social media, I find it easier to start random conversations over blog comments and twitter. As a result, I have met some of the best people, and I can’t wait to hug their necks. (You can see a list of them on the right column on my blog) It allows for the uncomfortableness of first meetings to be pretty well completely gone. And that makes things so much easier for me.

I was blessed to be able to go to America for a month by myself in 2005. I didn’t pay for a single hotel. I was able to meet some dear friends I had made in my Xanga days.And I felt totally, completely, 100% safe.

I have a new circle of online friends now, as relationships change and graduate and do what they do, though I do have some that I am still in contact with and are still friends as ever. Same as I am no longer in contact with some people who live in my town, or went to my church, or whom I went to school with. Some hung around, others didn’t.

I have been so fortunate in the last year or so, for I have encountered some of the most godly, inspiring, authentic people I’ve ever come across, on line or in my immediate vicinity. It’s exciting to wonder why God had us all sort of discover each other around the same-ish time (though, I was a little late to the party)… and why we all fell into relationship so quickly and easily. I feel like it’s like we all found little bits of our hearts in others…

God is moving, and He’s using social media to do it.

We are being gathered. We are being called. We are being equipped. We are being encouraged. We are being sent out, in our own way, with our own stories.

And he didn’t just do it to spy. He converses with people, and is slowly, in his own way, building his own relationships with those whom have become so dear to me. His entering my online world meant more to me than pretty well anything he has ever done.

Alece is one of those people you instantly fall in love with. Her story is full of heart break and beautiful growing redemption. She has connected with people across oceans and state borders. From living in small South AfricanVillages to major metropolitan US cities. Alece’s Blog. Alece’s Twitter.

It’s so normal to me that I don’t even really think about it anymore.

Most of my friends are people I met online.

Although I’ve gotta be honest… Using that phrase “met online” bugs me. It seems to diminish or devalue the experience and the friendships because of the negative connotations it holds for so many.

I never make distinctions like “online friends” and “in real life friends”. There is no delineation between them. A friend is a friend, no matter where or how we met.

The friendships I’ve built over the internet are every bit as real, deep, and authentic as any I’ve ever built face-to-face.

Maybe even more so.

Because I articulate myself better in writing, I’m quicker to dive into weighty topics over Twitter, email, and blogging than I probably would in person. Then once that groundwork is laid, it’s a whole lot easier for me to carry on that conversation offline.

Authenticity breeds authenticity. And while there are those who misrepresent themselves online, the majority of people I’ve gotten to know have proven themselves to be genuine.

Being real makes others feel safe to do the same.

And that’s how great friendships get built.

My life is full of them. And I am so incredibly grateful.

I have more friends now than I’ve ever had. I don’t say that to try to sound popular. (Because, trust me, I’m not. At all.) I say it with a shake of my head and disbelief in my voice. I can’t seem to find the right words to convey how astounded and humbled I am by the relationships God has gifted me with.

Because they truly are a gift.

And they have carried me through the most difficult season of my life. Even those people I haven’t had the chance to hug yet.

Honestly, as long as we’re bringing our true selves, it doesn’t matter if we get together in Starbucks or in an email.

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about me

Prudence is a 30-something writer who lives in Arizona with her husband Shawn and their chihuahuas Lengua and Zeus. She writes her life, her experiences and her crawl back to hope. Eventually, she hopes to visit India – a place that’s captured her heart without ever stepping foot on the soil.