So you're going to the World Cup. Congratulations. Also: Good luck. Rio is among the world's most expensive cities, and that's before hundreds of thousands of people descended on it for a month, filling all of the stadiums, hotel rooms, bars, and restaurants. But you aren't going there to worry about money. You're going to see one of the greatest spectacles in sports (or sport, if you happen to speak the Queen's English or be particularly annoying). While you're celebrating the most exciting month in soccer, here are a few things to keep in mind.

WHERE TO STAY

Don't expect to find any deals on hotels. Even though 147 new hotels were built for the World Cup, most of the rooms are full. And even if they aren't booked up, some were going for as much as $3,000 a night. If that kind of money doesn't make your wallet pucker, see if you can score a room at the Copacabana Palace. Renovated two years ago, the Copacabana Palace is one of South America's grandest hotels. Many of the rooms come with water views, not to mention the smug satisfaction of sleeping somewhere nicer than everyone else. The only possible downside is the assumptions the desk clerk will make about any female visitors you might return with. (Hookers. He'll think they're hookers.)

An option that won't dip as deep into your kid's college fund is to stay in a pousada, the Brazilian equivalent of a bed and breakfast. They're often much more charming than hotels. Check out hiddenpousadasbrazil.com for availability.

If you're feeling particularly adventurous, you can stay in a favela. They're much less dangerous than they were when City of God was made. Plus, they offer great deals—often on entire houses. Best of all, if you stick to Copacabana, Leblon, or Ipanema, they're built right into the side of the cliff, giving you one of the best views in the city.

WHERE TO DRINK (and maybe eat a little more)

Yes, it's a German joint and you're in Brazil, but Bar Brasilia, which opened in 1907, has some of the best atmosphere in the city—not to mention the best draft beers and sausages. Or head over to the 24-hour Cervantes in Copacabana, where you'll rarely find a seat, but will always find a good drink and an overstuffed and delicious pineapple-topped sandwich.

If you get the chance, you should also stop at one of the many roadside coconut sellers for a freshly-macheted coconut water. Just don't forget to tip the guy who "helps" you find a parking spot among the many obvious and available spaces. He'll key your car if not.

BEACHES NOT NAMED COPACABANA YOU MIGHT CONSIDER VISITING

Because sometimes you don't want a homeless man to smear excrement on your shoe while you're walking the main drag. (Seriously. If a dodgy looking man steps on your heel then repeatedly says, "Want shoe shine!?," there is a good chance he just smeared feces on whatever footwear you are about to throw away, and which he'd like you to pay him to clean.) For less touristy, equally beautiful beach options, head to nearby Ipanema or Leblon.

CITY OTHER THAN RIO YOU CAN'T MISS

Salvador, Bahia. Tons of open-air restaurants and bars in the square, nestled in a city that looks like an architectural blend of Rome and San Francisco. Although it does rain a lot.

OH, YOU CAME HERE FOR SOME SOCCER?

Including Rio, there are twelve cities and stadiums hosting matches, and they're pretty spread out. You'll need to fly to get to most of them, which can be a headache.Skyscanner.com lets you pick your team's group (the U.S. is in the hellish group G) and its flight finder will automatically fill in the itinerary and find you the best flights and prices.

HOW TO SPEAK PORTUGUESE

It's too late to learn, but it's not your fault. It's not like anyone was teaching Portuguese in high school. When in doubt, use your Spanish. It's pretty close (close enough that many locals will be able to understand you, sort of), and at least you'll look like you're trying.