Shreveport’s Hottest Bartenders – Gonzo’s Top 5

My Grandfather told me when he took me to my first bar, "Real bartenders have to be old men - who can talk about anything but football." Not to say my Grandfather wasn't a wise man, but I've found (in the few times I've been in a bar), real bartenders don't have to be old. Or men. Sometimes they're young. And female. And HOT! As evidenced by by the beautiful - and talented women here. Let me introduce you to what I think are Shreveport's Top 5 Hottest Bartenders.

5

Laura

Fast Eddie's Billiards

An amazing find in what is basically a yuppie pool hall. Laura is a cross between a sexy stew in a Mad Men episode, a kindhearted biker-gang chick, and a diner waitress who calls you “hon” and magically appears whenever your coffee needs a warm-up. It’s a formidable combination that has made a loyal fan of me.

With efficiency and a cheerleader attitude, she exerts control over the chaos, at the same time taking a moment to banter with guests - who range from college students to refinery workers. And as professional as she appears, you just know there’s going to be dancing on the bartop after hours. At least you hope so!

A famous person you’ve served:

Jack Black

The best thing about drinking in SBC is:

Being served by friends.

The worst thing about drinking in SBC:

Being over-served by friends.

The drink you most like to make:

It changes with time of day and season, but I’m particularly proud that I’m known for my Sazeracs and mint juleps.

The drink you least like to make:

Long Island Ice Teas. It’s a crappy, confused drink for people just looking to get drunk quickly.

Gina

The Cub

Gina is a professional wise-ass. But the smirk she greets you with has a way of turning into a grin that reveals her flip side: loveable dork.

She freely admits to this persona, even offering proof: she has been involved for four years running in a Dungeons and Dragons game with several restaurant-industry colleagues. (“D&D is the new poker,” she declares.) She also politely declines to reveal the identities of her co-gamers. she moves fast without seeming to, and she adjusts seamlessly from the customer who wants a shot and a beer to the one ordering a complicated cocktail. Also, though she doesn’t broadcast it, she’s a huge sports fan. If you catch her during a lull and want to talk old-school stats (Honus Wagner’s 1904 batting average, anyone?), you’re in luck.

Dumbest thing you’ve heard in a bar:

“No Coors Light? OK, I’ll have a dirty Belvedere martini.”

Most profound thing you’ve heard in a bar:

I can’t remember, but I probably said it, and I was probably drunk.

Least appreciated alcoholic beverage in SBC:

Rum is pretty awesome. During the summer an ice-cold Miller Lite draft on the patio at Superior is pretty amazing. I kinda want to pour it down my pants, especially if Big John is working. Also, I really like Fighting Cock Bourbon.

Your Rockstar Drink Recipe - Sex With An Alligator

sweet and sour mix

Midori® melon liqueur

1/2 oz raspberry liqueur

1/2 oz Jagermeister® herbal liqueur

Add sweet and sour & Midori to a shaker w/ice, shake and strain. Layer in razzberry liqueur and jager. Razzberry should go to the bottom and jager should float on top.

Works best in Martini glass.

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3

Megan

Mojo's

One of the best things about the bars in SBC is that your favorite bartender is not likely to be a struggling actor, an ivy league graduate student, or an out-of-work accountant. Megan started tending bar while earning her master’s at the LSU School of Business. Her plan was to go for the PhD and teach, but student loans of Biblical proportions — and the prospect of professorial earnings too meager to pay them off — pushed her into pouring drinks full-time. The thing is, she got to liking her new career. “I can’t imagine doing anything else,” she says. Her non-showy mastery of mixing drinks, her comfort behind the bar, and her full-throated laugh make you forget about all the sullen waifs who’ve ever served you a glass of underchilled Ketel One and called it a martini.

Hometown:

Chester, Virginia.

First drink you ever had:

I was always a “Can I have a sip” kind of kid… Probably don’t really remember the first one, but I would regularly sip from my father’s post-work blended Scotch on the rocks.

The drink you most like to make:

The one that I’m going to drink!

The drink you least like to make:

If there is a drink out there that is a version of a Long Island Iced Tea that has Blue Curacao and Pucker Schnapps in it, that is my least favorite drink.

What you drink at the end of your shift:

Although there are nights when I’m craving something involving the use of a shaker, the truth is that after 10+ hours on the bar there is nothing finer than cracking open an ice cold Budweiser.

Your Rockstar Drink Recipe - Juicy Pussy

1 oz Bailey's® Irish cream

1 oz peach schnapps

1 splash pineapple juice

Pour the Bailey's irish cream, peach schnapps and pineapple juice into a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well, and strain into a cocktail glass over 1/4 cup of shaved ice. Garnish with a maraschino cherry, and serve.

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2

Roxi

Riverside Warehouse

Roxi is among that distinct class of bartenders who have had musical careers, and who channel their passion and creativity into the kind of performing that goes on behind a great bar. Those who remember her from another era, as the riot grrrl fronting the acclaimed band Silver Loves Mercury, may find it jarring to see her now, sporting her natural brown hair, wearing a pink tank top and shorts, sloshing out Red Bull and vodkas to the peeps that once watched her on stage. The contrast is part of her appeal.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever seen?

A while ago a customer came in and passed out on the floor. Then, to top it off, he peed on himself.

First drink you ever had:Irish Mist out of my parents’ cabinet. I think I was nine.

First drink I ever ordered at a bar?

Amaretto Sour. I had no idea what it was, but somehow the name came out of my mouth.

If you weren’t a bartender, you’d be:

I am so f***ing proud to be a bartender. I am also a musician and an editor.

Dumbest thing you’ve heard in a bar:

“I can’t break the code” — meaning a guy can’t order a drink that anyone else has stated is a woman’s drink.

What you say at last call;

There is no last call, there’s just a time after which drink-making stops but the party rolls on. I usually stand on the bartop with a bullhorn and a bottle of Captain, unbutton my shirt and pour a line of sloppy shots, set them on fire, then flash my tits: it’s like a visual cue.

Your Rockstar Drink Recipe - Bayou Bomb ("Not really my favorite, but I make around two hundred a night on the weekends')

1/2 oz Jack Daniels

1/2 oz 151 Rum

pour into shot glass

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1

Danielle

Noble Savage

“Dani,” as she’s known to her customers, is a celebrity in Shreveport. Voted Best Bartender five years in a row in Shreveport-Bossier Magazine’s “Best Of” poll, this little package of pure dynamite knows how to keep the people happy. Today, she’s a fixture at The Noble Savage, but she got her start in bartending by accident. After some time working in room service at a local hotel, she was recruited to work as a cocktail waitress and quickly made her way up through the ranks. It was trial by fire at first, but soon Dani had the recipes down—recipes for the drinks and the recipe for giving the people what they want. Behind the bar, she is an entertainer. Whether it’s singing a song, doing a little dance, or just making you feel like you’ve been a regular when it’s your first visit, pleasing people is the name of the game. So if you come to The Noble Savage thirsty, she’ll make anything you like. But Dani says that anyone can make a drink; her talent is dealing with people. One visit, and you’ll be convinced.

"A customer will never know I’ve got a problem when I’m back here. At home or wherever. Because my job is to make them happy. See they—they deal with people all day on their jobs. They have problems, issues. They come in here, they'e not looking to hear my problems…I’m trying to make you feel better!

Your Rockstar Drink Recipe - Passion Pear Martini

1 ½ oz. X-Rated Fusion Liqueur

1 oz. pear flavored vodka

3 ¼ oz. St. Germaine

Juice of ½ of a fresh squeezed lime

Splash of Champagne on top

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Unfortunately, i don't have time to get to know every bartender in Shreveport-Bossier, but my liver knows I try. If I missed one, let me know. I'm always open to new ideas (and avenues of intoxication). But, if he were still around, I'm sure grandpa would have to agree - REAL bartenders don't have to be old...or men!