PACS:
1. n. (acronym)Picture Archiving and Communications System. A device or group of devices and associated network components designed to store and retrieve medical images.
2. n. (acronym)Pain And Constant Suffering.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

The X-Ray Man

It’s 2 AM on a SaturdayThe regular crowd is all hereThere’s an old man yelling out at meWith dementia he’s had for three years

He says, “Doc will you give me an enema?You know where the barium goesI got cramps and the trotsWhich I didn’t have lotsWhen I had a younger man’s hose…”

Oh La La La De De DaLa La, De De Da Da Dum

Read us a film, You’re the X-Ray ManRead us our film TONIGHT‘Cause we’re all in the mood for a maladyAnd CT will make us alright

Now John down in Nukes is a friend of mineHe tries not to wake me ‘till 3And he’s quick with his V/QAnd then he won’t seek youTill the ER just won’t let him beHe says, “Doc, they just ordered another one”“I tried not to do it till 10…But the patient is dusky and comatoseAnd probably won’t live until then.

Oh La La La De De DaLa La, De De Da Da Dum

Read us a film, You’re the X-Ray ManRead us our film TONIGHT‘Cause we’re all in the mood for a maladyAnd CT will make us alright

Paul is our CT TechnologistWho scans like he’s been there for daysAnd he’s talking with Davy whose CR’s are wavyBut they all pass QC anyway.And the ward-clerk is practicing medicineAs the waiting-room slowly gets meanYes, they’re sharing a drink they call ThunderbirdWhich does wonders for liver and spleen