Recently, I had the distinct pleasure of engaging in a video shoot for Medtronic Interstim device for fecal incontinence. This video will serve to bolster Medtronic’s website for fecal incontinence by providing a real face, and story, to the issue. In coming to my hometown, Medtronic was able to interview me, my doctor, and my family, and capture the impacts on all of our lives from this phenomenal device.

After giving authorization, my family was included in the taping of this promotional video. In basing this video in reality, I thought it important to give the go ahead for my family to be portrayed. When trying to explain to my 6 year old daughter what the purpose of this video was, I found myself stumbling over concepts she may be too young to understand. When asked the question by my daughter, “Will this video be on TV for us to see?” I was able to give the easy answer of “No, it will be on the computer, on a website.” When asked the question by my daughter, “Will my friends be able to watch me?” I was able to answer, “Well it’s like an adult movie.” In summation, my daughter concluded, “Oh, OK, so we are making an adult movie for the computer website…cool, can’t wait to tell my teacher.”

UH Oh. Adult movie, computer website. I am seeing here that she requires more clarification. I show her my scar and proceed to tell her that the video is about “mommy’s surgery” and we will help tell others that need the surgery that they can get it and be happy and healthy families. Phew, bullet dodged. Although, frankly, sometimes talking about incontinence does have the same stigma as talking about “adult” movies.

Living with a bowel disorder is not easy. In fact, it can be downright awful at times. Besides the obvious physical discomfort, emotional stress is rampant. As an ambassador for those suffering with fecal incontinence and a support group facilitator for those with bowel disorders, the theme of negativity around incontinence is a prevalent one. In fact, I urge you, if you are NOT suffering with incontinence, to imagine a day when you may be. Can you imagine how incontinence would impact your daily life? I wrote about my experiences in-depth in this post here. Can you imagine how leakage, urgency, physical pain in the rectal region, would change your outlook on your day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute happenings?

Remaining positive when dealing with your own bowel disorder is difficult. Oftentimes, bowel disorders lead to increased isolation, as the individual suffering refuses to share such personal information, and/ or feels uncomfortable leaving familiar areas. Often, people go years, even decades, before opening up about their incontinence to anyone, including health professionals. This suffering in silence wears down a person, physically and mentally.

It’s time, as a society, to stop being afraid of talking about fecal incontinence. Let’s not allow “pooping your pants” to be a punchline. It’s time to create a safe space to identify, share, and discuss incontinence. Only then, will people truly seek the treatment they need, and deserve. And, guess what, I don’t mind starting the conversation.

Birth without trauma. Birth in which the mother and baby are healthy and happy. Birth which leaves no lasting ramifications, either physical or emotional. A Perfect Birth. That’s what I have now experienced with the birth of my son.

Going into birth this time, I was ready. Ready, educated, and excited. My pregnancy before this delivery was rocky, to say the least. Symphysis Pubic Dysfunction, two hospital stays due to illness, and a last-minute run around regarding getting the delivery I wanted (and needed) posed real issues for me. However, the delivery, a delivery that myself and my doctor agreed to be most beneficial to mother and baby, was such that it set up “a perfect birth.”

My son’s birth story:

I went into the hospital at 11:30, with the understanding that the c-section would take place at 1:00. I was 38 weeks, 2 days and with no indications of imminent labor, I understood that my surgery could be “pushed” for emergency patients. I was made comfortable while waiting for my turn, and an IV was inserted, and any questions I had were answered. A little after 1:00, I was wheeled into the delivery room. I walked myself to the bed and was told how to sit for an effective spinal. All the while, the medical professionals present were kind, understanding, supportive, and reassuring. My spinal was placed without incident and then I was instructed to lie down. Once numbed, I was happy to see my husband arrive by my head. And then, the incision, the surgery, and less than 8 minutes from first incision, my baby boy’s screams as he was born. Perfect baby boy, who was immediately shown to me and then checked out by the nurses (with my husband by his side and in the same room). Once wrapped up, my husband held him by my head as they stitched me up. All the while I felt cared for, informed, and respected. A complete opposite to my previous birth experience. My husband, baby, and I ventured to recovery together where I was able to effectively breastfeed and bond with the newest member of our family. Later that evening, my daughter joined us and our family of four was “officially” all together.

Since the birth, I have managed my pain and was off all pain killers within the first week. I am able to walk now with the symphysis pubic dysfunction drastically diminished. I have nothing but positive memories of the birth and my daily interactions reflect positivity. I am looking forward to noting my progress at my 6 week check-up. The baby is doing wonderfully as well. Over eight pounds at birth, he continues to thrive, both feeding and sleeping as well as a 3 and 1/2 week old should.

The support I have had for this birth experience was immeasurable. Thank you all.

In reading about other individual’s experiences with elective cesarean, I have counted myself lucky that the opposition from medical professionals that many mothers face in obtaining the right to choose this type of delivery is something I have only READ about. Until now. This past weekend, my OBGYN doctor called me with a heads up that “we may have a little problem with your planned c-section.” My doctor, (who is a huge advocate for my planned elective cesarean that is supposed to take place in 3 days), has received an e-mail from the hospital I am set to deliver at asking him “why is she (meaning me) choosing this mode of delivery electively at 38 + weeks gestation?” Furthermore, the hospital is claiming that the amniocentesis appointment that has been set for months for the day before the scheduled c-section is not set up. (even though I have paperwork confirming the appointment). The claim is that there is no appointment, therefore, no ability to process to lung development, therefore, no elective c-section. In addition to these claims from the hospital, my OBGYN has informed me that many mothers going in for an elective c-section recently at this hospital have been faced with “inconclusive” findings during the amniocentesis, therefore, the elective c-sections for these mothers have been cancelled, resulting in a later rescheduling or more likely, the need for the mother to go into labor prior to having a c-section.

I find this completely unacceptable for the hospital to pull this little stunt 3 days prior to my planned c-section. Not only do I believe that elective cesarean IS the better choice for delivery, I have medical indications that support my right to demand an elective cesarean section without trial of labor. These indications include:

1. Previous BOTCHED vaginal delivery in which I was in labor for over 30 hours, pushed for over 3, and delivered a sunny side up 8 pound 14 ounce baby girl with forceps.

5. The medtronic Interstim for fecal incontinence device that I have placed on my sacral nerve does not support the trials of labor and delivery, a c-section is indicated as a better mode for delivery.

6. The current SPD, symphysis pubic dysfunction, that I am dealing with will only get worse with a trial of labor and delivery, a c-section is indicated as a better mode for delivery.

Because of all the above indicators, my anxiety level is through the roof just thinking about a trial of labor, that could possibly result in a vaginal delivery. Also, the closer I get to my due date, the more likely my elective planned c-section will become a c-section that results after I go into labor, which is not an ideal situation for me, emotionally or physically. I know with certainty that my OBGYN is on my side with this, and he is currently trying to sort the whole thing out with the hospital. Later today, I have an appointment with my OBGYN doctor and I hope it brings good news. It’s just a shame that I need to spend these next couple of days worrying over a choice that I should have the right to make without the hassle instead of mentally preparing myself for the joy of meeting my son via the certainty of a planned elective cesarean delivery.

The first thing my physical therapist pointed out to me when I was diagnosed with symphysis pubic dysfunction, SPD, is that the mode of the baby’s arrival would be important to consider. Already knowing that I plan to have an elective c-section based on my past experiences, she quickly added on that a c-section is the best way to deliver a baby from a mother suffering with SPD. Thinking about this, it makes perfect sense. Why try to force a child’s head through an area in your body that is in extreme pain? Why try for a vaginal birth when the reality of a vaginal birth for women with SPD is the action of splitting the pelvis further apart, possibly even breaking the pelvis, and causing life long problems and discomfort? Why not opt for the truly safer option for women with SPD, the elective cesarean and bypass the pelvic floor and further damage to that area completely?
Why, when based with the evidence of a professional, and based upon a mother’s own pain with SPD, is a vaginal birth even considered? Well, me being me, I checked out literature and forums surrounding this very topic. The topic of c-section with SPD versus vaginal birth. With despair, I noted that many women, women suffering with SPD, now also are suffering with disparaging answers and discussions on forums regarding their possible choice to have a c-section. Why is society so adamant that vaginal birth is best? Clearly, when a woman is suffering with SPD, c-section should be the most obvious and logical choice. Unfortunately, the forums I encountered suggested ways to still push for a vaginal birth with this condition. Ways that encouraged mothers to avoid a c-section at any cost. Ways that clearly were not optimal to a woman in labor. One such suggestion was measuring how far you could put your knees apart prior to labor without essentially cracking your pelvis, creating a ribbon loop, and using the loop during labor to not surpass that width. As a women suffering with SPD, I can assure you that the width would not be that far, thus making labor and delivery much more difficult to achieve. In addition, delivery of a baby vaginally by a woman with SPD increases the chances for SPD in the next pregnancy. For that matter, any traumatic vaginal birth where there is damage to the pelvis or pelvic floor results in an increased likelihood for SPD in future pregnancies. I know this to be true as my current SPD condition is a result of my weakened pelvic floor by way of my prior forceps traumatic delivery.

I’m all for choice in birth. However, when society dictates a decree about vaginal birth at any cost, I hesitate to agree. There should always be an open-minded discussion regarding the mode of delivery. One that considers the mother’s physical and emotional needs as well as the baby.

Happy Halloween! Watch out for ghosts, goblins, witches, pirates, and split pelvis’? This morning I found myself back in physical therapy, with the same wonderful therapist that helped me through all of my incontinence issues and sacroiliac pain post delivery of my now 4 1/2 year old daughter. I found myself sitting in the same chairs, in the same office, waiting for an explanation and hoping for relief from the near constant pain radiating from my pelvis and down my legs. It didn’t take long to get the diagnosis, symphysis pubic dysfunction. Or, in layman’s terms, a pelvis that feels split in the middle resulting in feelings of constant pressure and pain radiating down the legs and around the groin area. Once again, a diagnosis of something that very few people talk about, which causes potential delays in diagnosis and treatment. Luckily, I have only been experiencing symptoms for about a week. However, when I originally went to my OBGYN’s office, the mistaken diagnosis of round ligament pain was the only explanation. It was not until I pushed for more answers that symphysis pubic dysfunction, SPD, came out as the “official” diagnosis by way of my physical therapist. My message, as always, if something does not feel right, don’t settle. Keep pushing for the right diagnosis, so that you can be on the way to more effective treatment and recovery. SPD is something that won’t go away until (hopefully) post delivery and post breastfeeding. However, it is something that can be managed with less pain than if left untreated. For now, I will leave you in the spirit of the day of Halloween and say BOO (hoo)!