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WTF Is Going On With Hillary and Benghazi?

Benghazi, Benghazi, Benghazi. What does it mean, and why won’t everyone stop talking about it? We’re here to help. Here’s everything you need to know to act like you know everything about what’s happening with Benghazi:

THE BACKGROUND

Back in the fall of 2012, there was a terror attack at a US compound in Benghazi, Libya that killed four Americans. At the time, the government said the attack was part of a protest against an anti-Islamic video.

The attack was just two months before the Presidential election, and admitting that there had been a terror attack might have hurt Obama’s chances. It turns out that the government knew all along that the attack had nothing to do with that video, but that it was a pre-planned terror attack. People have blamed Hillary for this cover-up, which she says was a matter of national security.

WHAT’S HAPPENED SINCE THEN?

Hillary has admitted that she knew it was a pre-planned terror attack, and she’s paid for it over and over again. Seven different Congressional committees have investigated the Benghazi attack, not to mention the countless news reports and political candidates that have used it against her. Three years later, it kind of seems like it should be over.

WHAT HAPPENED LAST WEEK?

Because seven Congressional committees apparently wasn’t enough, a new committee was formed for the sole purpose of investigating Benghazi. Since the committee was formed, critics have said that it’s just a conservative Hillary witch hunt, but shit didn’t hit the fan until it was Hillary’s turn to testify last week. She sat there for 11 hours, answering question after question that were all designed to try to make her mad or to get her to say something incriminating. Oh, and of course we had to talk about her emails for a few hours.

THE VERDICT?

It didn’t go so well for the Republicans. In fact, most news sources say that the hearing will help Hillary’s chances at the White House, as it made the Republicans look petty and desperate. Hillary kept her composure and dealt with all the questions like the HBIC she is, though we got some pretty great looks of boredom.

WHAT HAPPENS NOW?

With any luck, this will be the last time we hear about Benghazi. More likely though, if Hillary makes it to the general election next year, the Republicans will keep using Benghazi against her. Whatever happens, we have a feeling Hillary is ready for it, because she’s Hillary fucking Clinton.