How To Win The Dating Game: Become What You Want To Be [Opinion]

“Welcome to planet Earth. There is nothing that you cannot be, or do, or have. You are a magnificent creator” (Abraham/Esther Hicks). When engaging in what I affectionately call The Dating Game, there comes a time when you are the only person that matters. It is at this moment when the pickup lines, the comedic conversations, and the flirtatious gestures become irrelevant. This is the moment when you as a woman must look deep within yourself and embrace the fact that YOU are responsible for you own life. Your happiness, your fulfillment and satisfaction are all up to you. As a man it is not in my power nor am I charged to be your end all be all.

When you embrace the responsibility mentioned above you put yourself in position to design your life as you see fit. Who stays and who leaves is up to you. Even more powerful, who or what you attract, is because of you. Simply stated, you attract who you are.

I was inspired to write this article after a conversation I recently had with a friend of mine. She began to tell me about a guy whom she had been dating. She complained that he didn’t seem to make as much money as she would like. During the conversation I uncovered he is 26, still in school and undecided in regards to his future aspirations. He lives with his mother, and his car is far from new. He is essentially living life as a struggling college student (A lot of us have lived this way). Ironically enough, as she described him I couldn’t help but notice she also was describing herself at the same time. She then asked my opinion on the matter. I asked her two questions. First, do you know the kind of man you want? And second, are you that kind of woman?

I won’t share her responses but I will share our moment as I pose the same questions to you. For many women the struggle is determining the kind of man they want in their life. Yet many more fail to realize that they must FIRST be who it is they desire to attract on a consistent basis. The places we frequent, our closest friends, the thoughts that continuously take refuge in our minds are all revealers of who we are. This determines who we meet, where we meet them, and how we meet them. All of this comes into play when it comes down to the quality of our relationships and the overall quality of our lives. No matter who we are, or where we are, we will never receive something different until we first become something or someone different.

Please allow me to close by emphasizing that this topic has nothing to do with material possessions nor is it meant to encourage you to chase some sort of social status. I beseech you to settle on the quality of man that you want. I encourage you to hold fast to those values that are non-negotiable. But even more so I implore you to become what you want because it is my conviction that in doing so you will receive the same. Until next time may your life continue to flourish as you continue to live, love and progress.