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9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

Hi,

I am so frustrated with my hospital provider & their doctors! Just need to vent & I have a few questions to reassure myself I'm doing what's best for my DS. They say they're baby-friendly but none of their doctors seem very pro-breastfeeding or at least educated about it enough AND two of them have now given me parenting advice! I'm ther for medical expertise not parentip tips!

I switched doctors because I wasn't liking her & the last appt she told me I should let my baby cry-it-out so he sleeps in his crib. (We bed-share).
Today I tried a new ped. & same thing but worse. She also told me I should let him cry cuz he has to learn to sleep on his own in crib & self-soothe. If not, he's going to continue to have sleep problems. All I mentioned to her was that his naps are short, 30-45 min. She proceeded by asking further sleep questions...that's when she gave me her 2 cents. I am just not willing to let my baby cry, plus I never said I didn't want him to sleep w me anymore. She obviously saw that as a problem!
Then she started asking about nutrition/solid foods. She straight out told me breastmilk shouldn't be his main source of nutrition. I responded w my knowledge & said AAP says it should. She then rephrased, well it shouldn't be his only source of nutrition...breastmilk is not enough & he needs iron.
She says I should be giving him baby food twice a day...is this true?
I'm trying BLS, so I've done sweet potato, banana, avocado,squash, pear. But I only do it once or twice a week, is this ok?

So, my concern about naps, does anyone have advice? How to make his naps longer? Also, I have to lay w him for his naps, if not, he wakes up within 10minutes.

Oh! She also said I should've started solids at 4-6 months. Without even knowing him & whether he was ready or not.
Btw, my DS is in the 83rd percentile for both height & weight.

TIA!!

Last edited by @llli*lovinmommyhood; November 4th, 2011 at 11:55 AM.
Reason: adding

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

OMG. FIND A NEW DOCTOR!! That's just rediculous. You can even read on baby food packaging where it says that the government recommends exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months. Exclusive means ONLY breastfeeing. And BLS is the way it should be and don't let anyone pressure you into cramming solids down his throat if he's not ready. You will know when he's ready because he will literally try to grab the fork out of your hand as you eat!
As for the sleeping issues, it's really only an issue if you have a problem with the way things are going. But keep in mind that while you are ok with it now, (your baby is only 9 months after all), you may want to start taking steps to get him to sleep on his own. My sister let this go on and was still having to lay down with her 2-year-old to get her to take a nap. She would also wake up after about 45 minutes.
There is a book called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child". I never read it, but a friend of mine swore by it when she was having issues with her baby sleeping. It illustrates many methods to getting your child on a healthy sleep schedule. Good luck!

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

My 8-month old doesn't do well with naps either. At daycare, I think that they get him to sleep in his crib, but the naps are only 20 - 45 minutes long. At home with me on the weekends, his naps are *only* if I am holding him. As soon as I try to put him down, he immediately wakes back up. I have no advice for you on how to improve naps, but you're not alone. While it would be nice if my DS could nap on his own, I don't really care that much to put a lot of effort into it.

I agree though - try another doctor. Definitely don't put up with craziness like that!

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

I am not expert, but I think that as long as your baby was full term then his iron shouldn't be too much of an issue. http://kellymom.com/nutrition/vitamins/iron.html
My boy was premature, so we had him tested at 9 mo and he was little low.

Why do you only offer solids a few times a week? I would offer a few times a day and if she eats, then good, if she doesn't, then that is fine, too. Offering a variety and often is what I got out of the BLW literature.

My pediatrician told us not to worry too much about nap length as long as he seems to be pretty happy and is getting good sleep at night. Maybe she just told us this to make us feel better about his bad daycare nap habits But since he is sleeping better at night now he is a much happier baby, even with short daycare naps.

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

In my opinion, you are going to your doctor for medical advice, as you mentioned, so just don't listen when they get into parenting advice that you don't agree with. My doctor also said to let our son cry it out, and I just smile and nod. My husband and I will find our own approach and she won't really have any say in it, but I am not going to tell her that. I don't care to argue, b/c I just think she has no say in the matter.

We've been feeding our son solids since 4.5 months, but he was very ready for them. We did purees at first, which he loves, and now we are doing some BLS as well. We do two times per day, morning and mid afternoon. Babies produce an enzyme called rennin in their stomachs to curdle milk and make it pass through their system more slowly. As solids are introduced the production of that enzyme starts to decrease. I think around 1 year and a half they don't produce it at all anymore, but at nine months your baby should stilll be producing quite a bit. So solids definitely don't need to be the major source of nutrition.

Does your baby take a pacifier? My son wouldn't nap if he didn't, I think. As it is, I nurse him in bed, then sneak away after he has fallen asleep. I put pillows all around him... I am not sure if that would work for you, or how mobile your son is! We also wrap him in a sheet in a kind of loose swaddle. That seems to help him sleep longer, and when we do that we can often lay him in his crib for his naps.

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

Thanks so much! I already feel better!
It really does feel good to know I'm not alone....w the nap issues.
Megan, I feel the same, while it would be nice if he slept on his own for naps, I'm not in a hurry to change this. I did purchase the No-cry nap solution book to check out any tips. I know my LO is growing fast & he won't be a baby for llong so I don't mind cuddling w him or holding him

Christopher's mom, thx for ur thread! Great to know others' experiences! I will continue bedsharing as long as it works for the family.

Sassypants, thx for the link! Very helpful! Sending to my DH...since the doc scared him.

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

w/pp my DS will be 9mo on the 8th and he pretty much only naps at the breast, and i LOVE that he does! IMO BLS is the way to go all LOs are different i dont believe in at *blank* months their ready its all up to the LO. Your doing a great job momma dont let them get in your head YOU know your LO BEST do what feels right for you and him. Good luck

Re: 9 mo well check-up...so frustrated

my DD had to be held for all her naps as well until sometime around 8 months (we bedshare and she's never slept in her crib). the solution we found to get her to nap on her own: we put a queen-size memory foam on the floor of our living room and covered it with a quilt (originally we did this to give her a cushy crawling and play space - the floor always seemed so hard!). now I lie next to her on the memory foam and nurse her down for naps. once she's good and asleep, I slip my nipple out of her mouth and she'll sleep there by herself... sometimes for 20 mins, sometimes 2 hours... and I can actually get something done, woo hoo! this way I don't have to worry about her falling off the bed, tangling up in covers, etc. I stay nearby of course in case she wakes (I never know how long that blessed nap will be!) and I put some music on for her so that I can make a bit of noise or talk and not wake her. Previously if I ever tried to put her down once she was asleep she would wake within 30 seconds no matter how asleep she was... this way, I'm the one who moves and she stays comfy on the foam. she sleeps down there now for all her naps and from about 8:30pm until DH and I are ready to take her to bed with us at night.
Hope this gives you something else to try <3