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Monday, May 2, 2011

fra.gments

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In the past 40 days, I have packed, packed some more, business-tripped, moved, road-tripped, and vacationed. I also dined, visited, jogged, danced, sang, cheered, and picked up a manfriend along the way. Bring on the unpacking: bring on living in a room full of boxes. I’ve seen changes at work and lost access to my favourite home and been welcomed into a new one. I have no consistent thoughts after all this busyness. What you get are fragments. .

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one. My life is a circus, only not in the sexy way like Britney’s life –more in the “funhouse mirrors reflect my inner sanctum quite accurately” kind of way.

two. I had a dream last week that I had a staring contest with a bear and won. Take that, fictitious woodland creature.

three. Strangers on a plane will make fun of you, so long as they don’t realize it’s you they’re mocking. God bless Canadian Politeness.

four. I got more stressed out during last night’s episode of “Cupcake Wars” than I did during my college finals my entire educational experience combined. But then, I was paying more attention to the details last night, which could be why.

five. Stuff. It seems important, until you have to move it all and store it all and stare at it all day. Love affair with Craigslist: commencing.

six. A spider is only as big as your lack of defences. Right?

seven. The phrase “I miss you” is about as useful as one stitch on a gaping flesh wound.

eight. 63 unread emails, an overflowing inbox, pending requests from management, and a box of unprocessed files where your chair should be. Welcome back from Vacation. Signed: Monday Morning.

nine. Can’t find your alarm clock? Get yourself a toddler, instead.

ten. I’ve often made gentle fun of those “normal” heart-shaped-eye-people that stare longingly at calendars, count days, and sigh from morning to night. Turns out, I’m normal. What a sweet tasting disappointment...