"I did go to H&M because I'm collecting apparel for the people of Haiti. Of course I don't use dressing rooms. There was no one in the store." She clarified: "Any woman in their right mind in this economy wants to collect clothes for charitable purposes."

As for her lack of panties, she said," The shopper needs glasses. I wear La Perla G-string nude and they were on me." She said the "monkey brain" cashier is her friend "Brett" and denied calling herself a "former supermodel."

"There’s nothing former about me. I was at the top of the food chain. I coined the term."

So to recap: Janice Dickinson does not use dressing rooms, donates to charity, wears expensive underwear and managed to fit her "I was the original supermodel" speech into her defense of not going commando.