What we watched: The 2011-12 English Premier League season just started. Ian Darke and Steve McManaman were supposed to be calling the Tottenham Hotspur/Everton match, but the Tottenham Hotspur/Everton match was postponed on account of what Darke termed "a very troubled week in London with the riots as I'm sure you've seen across the United States. Terrible, shameful and shocking scenes."

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Here's the terrible, shameful and shocking scene near Tottenham's White Hart Lane home. In fact, the area's still a crime scene, and you can't very well turn a crime scene over to soccer fans. So, Darke and McManaman were handed the Fulham vs. Aston Villa match, and they've assured the viewing audience that that match would be as wonderful as the riot-ruined one.

Stevie MNZM 2, Eldrick Tont 0: "The 14-time major winner followed a dismal first-round 77 with a messy second-round 73 on Friday, low-lighted by back-to-back double bogeys on Nos. 11 and 12. On the 11th, he hit a green-side bunker shot into the water. On the 12th, he drove it in the woods, punched out and then drilled the ball right back into the woods. He finished 10 over, missing the cut by six shots." [Sun-Times]

Big Z has taken all he could take and can't take no more: "Carlos Zambrano cleaned out his locker and told friends he was retiring Friday night after serving up five home runs and getting ejected in a 10-4 loss to the Braves. Whether or not he will pitch again remains to be seen, though even if he does decide to apologize, his days as a Cub are probably over. 'He didn't have it tonight,' manager Mike Quade said." [Chicago Tribune]

Go Bills: "It's a great move for Lee," Evans' agent, Ben Dogra told the Buffalo News. "Lee has had an unbelievable stay in Buffalo. The organization has been very good to him and at some point in a business career, people have to make difficult decisions. Obviously Buffalo thinks this is a good move for their team … It's a terrific move for Lee." [Toronto Sun]

Your "If Zambrano didn't make proper fans give up on the Cubs, this should" Interlude: