(I’ve just started a new job and have had a several-hour-long meeting with my new coworkers. The coffee is percolating through me so I head straight for the bathroom. The CEO, who has a reputation for being eccentric, looks across to my urinal.)

Boss: “Ah… Are you Jewish, or did you go to public school?”

Me:*turning red* “Um… er… Just ‘done’ is all.”

Boss: “Well, at least you know you’ll never be a banker. They’re all complete pricks.”

(I wish I could say this was the limit of his behaviour, but it wasn’t.)