9 New Orphans

A Palestinian terror attack leaves 9 new orphans.

by Tzvi Yehuda Dickstein

On July 26, 2002, Palestinian gunmen sprayed bullets on Israeli cars near the Jewish village of Carmel, killing four people and injuring three others. Three of the dead were members of the Dickstein family, including both parents, Yosef Yaakov and Chana, and their 9-year-old son, who were on their way to spend the Sabbath with friends.

Twelve-year-old Shlomo Dickstein, who was badly wounded in the attack, took his father's cellphone and called the army for help, as his parents lay dying next him.

Yosef Yaakov's father was a Holocaust survivor. Now the Dicksteins are survived by 9 children -- 9 new orphans of Palestinian terror.

Following is the eulogy delivered by the Dickstein's oldest child.

EULOGY

What can I say now? Which words can describe the magnitude of this calamity? How can I speak in the past tense of all the people who we loved the most? About Abba? About Ima? And Shuva'el? Suddenly, everything has been cut off in the middle.

Abba, on Thursday night until 2:30 in the morning, we were working together on the Sukkah, and we were in the middle of studying a Torah passage. Who will continue this?

Know, Abba and Ima, that we, your children, received a strong education, an education with ideals, and even when you are not here physically, it continues to strengthen us according to your path. You decided to leave Jerusalem, the easy life, the places of work that were close to home, even though there was nothing pressing. But you still decided, during these difficult times for the Jews in Israel, to move, and to try to strengthen and be strengthened. To acquire by actions the beloved land that you so loved, love of which you so transferred to us, with many trips around the country. And by teaching us.

"Beloved land, do not cover your blood!"

...Abba, how happy you were that I am studying in Beit El. We studied together on Fridays. Ima relieved you from all the Shabbat preparations, and you would come and we would learn for some two hours. As the time passed, we saw how our spiritual worlds began to take on parallel lines. You saw me walking in the same path that you took 25 years ago, when you started out as a student in Rabbi Avraham HaKohen Kook's yeshiva. How much joy and satisfaction you had from me. Abba, I so much wanted to be like you. To be "a son like his father..."

Last night, we sat together, all the children, and we all recounted how in this last period of your lives, you both felt satisfaction. Tzofiyah said that you told her just a week ago, "We are as if dreaming. We have reached our 'resting place and inheritance.'" You knew that you had found your place. You felt good in Psagot. You succeeded in fulfilling in the best way all of your ideals.

You reached your eternal rest. But what will be with us?

Yes, you reached your eternal rest. But what will be with us? Who will be the Ima of Adiel?? Who will be the father to Shir-el?? You so much wanted to see us getting married. Who will walk us down to the marriage canopy??

Everything that you built in the house, was built with the future in mind. You wanted there to be room for everyone -- everything on a "large" scale. Now you won't merit seeing your grandchildren...

In my name, and in the name of all the children, we promise to preserve the unity of our family, to stay together, even at the price of giving up personal dreams. This is what you wanted all these years, and this is what we will try to do.

We, the family, believe that this tremendous sacrifice that we made is not just a personal sacrifice. Our pain is not just a private pain. Abba and Ima were not killed in a gang war, or in a car accident, or because of any sins of theirs. Shuva'el who did not taste the taste of sin certainly was not murdered for that. Abba and Ima and Shuva'el were murdered, in the light of day, in front of their children, by a cruel, debased murderer, because they were Jews who lived freely in their state that they so loved, without fear.

Jewish people: this sacrifice is for all of us! Everyone must feel this pain. Everyone must understand, know, and feel that they have taken the best of our nation.

The Holy One, Blessed be He, is shaking us and telling us, Wake up!

The Holy One, Blessed be He, is speaking to us via the day-to-day reality. He is shaking us and telling us, Wake up! Understand who we are, and what we are doing here in the Land of Israel! Why are we here?

Unfortunately, we have been tested with many tragedies of late. To tell others that "the Land of Israel is acquired with difficulty," that "acquiring with difficulty is an eternal acquisition,” that "God only tests those who can withstand the ordeals” -- that is not so hard. But to tell it to ourselves -- that is hard. And to really feel it - that's even harder.

But no one asked us whether or not we want to be heroes. We didn't want, and we weren't ready, but we were forced. We were forced to be strong. We will try, with the help of all of you, to be strong. We will add faith, we will add courage, we will add strength. We don't know how we will keep going in this insane situation. We don't know what will be with us -- both the little ones, and those of us children who are somewhat older but still feel little. But we know with certainty that we will go on. We will work hard, and we will strive, and we will overcome, and we will go on.

All that we have been saying about accepting the Divine judgment with love, does not take away even a whit of responsibility from those who were supposed to be in charge: The leaders of the state and its ministers, who are abusing their job for which they were elected, and are not doing enough to prevent incidents like this, or to uplift the nation. This is their job. If they don't want to do it, then they should give it to someone else who can do it.

We, the family, decided yesterday to bury you in Psagot, in the land that is precious to you, the place they decided on their own that it would be their place. Abba and Ima spent the last two years, and all their resources, to build this house. The fear never occurred to them that we would not be able to live everywhere in Israel. I heard people who tried to weaken them, but Abba and Ima were strong and did not break. Abba and Ima decided that this would be their place, and that of the family. We the children are setting up our base in Psagot.

Our struggle is that of all the Jewish people. Jews throughout the generations are with us.

Our struggle is that of all the Jewish people. Jews throughout the generations are with us. Abba and Ima and Shuva'el are with us. We will continue together, without fear.

Shuva'el, the little one, so cute... I remember when you were born... A boy who was all joy to his parents, a good boy, a good influence to his brothers. Such a good friend. So sweet, a tzaddik [righteous]. You never had to be reminded to study, the one who everyone loved, a smart boy, who reads books. They murdered you when you were reading, and your head fell on the book. A tzaddik, so pure -- you never did bad to anyone.

Abba and Ima: Please watch over us from where you are, on your sons and daughters: Tzvi Yehuda, Tzofiyah, Ayelet, Didi, Renanah, Shuva - ah, Shlomo. And watch over the little ones, Bnayah, Shir-el, and Adiel, who will not get to know their own parents.

Watch over all of us, the orphans. It's hard to digest that we are called orphans... We know that you are with us, help us be strong.

Before I conclude, I want to ask, in the name of all the children, forgiveness from you -- for any offense that we did you, or chutzpah, or argument. I beg that you forgive us, holy Abba and Ima, and Shuva'el.

"And the Almighty will wipe away the tears from every face, and swallow up death forever."

The opinions expressed in the comment section are the personal views of the commenters. Comments are moderated, so please keep it civil.

Visitor Comments: 17

(17)
Chana Kitay,
March 16, 2004 12:00 AM

Chana Dickstein A"H was my second cousin, and I never met her, now I never will

This act of terorism hit very close to home for me, because the Dicksteins were my cousins. Chana Dickstein was the daughter of my mother's first cousin. I had never met her or her family but, I had always heard about them, because my grandmother was very close to her nieces and nephews in Eretz Yisroel. The fact that terrorism touched my own family makes all this more real and frightening for me. I don't think there is one person in Klall yisroel who hasn't been personally touched by terrorism in our times.

(16)
Debbie Dienstag,
August 6, 2002 12:00 AM

Beautiful, moving piece!

We can only learn and admire such special people.
Is there a fund being established for the Dickstein family?
I am sure many of your readers would like to know.

(15)
Anonymous,
August 6, 2002 12:00 AM

Sad, what will become of the nine children?

This is truly a sad story. I pray for peace everyday for Israel. My concern is what will happen to the nine children now. Do they have a place to live?

(14)
Gary Higley,
August 5, 2002 12:00 AM

genocide

Palestinian extremists are an affront to every civilized person and nation. Why doesn't the UN address this with some sort of strong denunciation?

(13)
Dov Ben Essine,
August 5, 2002 12:00 AM

So very painfull

and sad.No words,or tears lessen the pain and sorrow you feel.Your parents prematurely having to make the ultimate sacrifice ,so indirectly we in the diaspora can hang on a little longer to the material.We as a people in the diaspora are great with words, advice, how we feel or well wishes yet slow in deeds.I feel less than honestif i did not admit here that i feel guilt for not being at home with my people in a time of such need.
Let us all at least consider to make a difference.Let aliyah be our goal.next year in jerushalayim.I love and think about you my dear bereaved brothers and sisters.
May hashem look kindly upon you.

(12)
Anonymous,
August 5, 2002 12:00 AM

I heard it live, on the radio

I heard it live, on the radio, and was very impressed. May G-d give him and his siblings the strength to continue, and they shouldn't know any more tragedy.

(11)
Esther bat Rivka,
August 3, 2002 12:00 AM

We love you

While we cry, we want you to know that we love you. You are our children. Remember that HaShem is your father and you are really not alone. Our prayers are with you, and our hearts close to yours. May you be blessed to witness the coming of Moshiyach very soon. May HaShem give nechama to you meanwhile and rise the neshamot of your parents and brother to the greatest height.

(10)
Anonymous,
August 2, 2002 12:00 AM

In the next world...

While we cry, the neshamos of Rabbi and Mrs. Dickstein and Shuva'el, Hy"d, must be drawing enormous nachas from the emunah and resolve expressed by their son in his hesped at their funerals.
May Hashem give him and his siblings courage and strength to go on! Kinderlach, we are davening for you!

(9)
Michelle Lipschitz,
July 31, 2002 12:00 AM

They did not die in vain

As I sit here crying, I cannot for the life of me imagine what these incredible children are going through. They are true Tzadakim as were their parents and younger brother. They did not die in vain...they live lived a full Jewish life. Full of love and spirituality. My heart breaks for the children, but as I say these words, I know deep down the children will prevail with Hashems help.

(8)
Anonymous,
July 31, 2002 12:00 AM

The Dicksteins' courage and hope is amazing. Yosef Yaakov and Chana Dickstein must have been wonderful parents to have such children. Their deaths and that of their son are a loss to all of israel. Is there anything we can do to help their surviving children?

(7)
Aura Slovin,
July 31, 2002 12:00 AM

Comfort for the Dickstein children

I can only hope to give some form of comfort to the children. No one can know the pain and emptyness you are experiencing. I am part of your extended family a sister jew living in Brooklyn N.Y. crying with you over the loss of your dear wonderful parents May Hashem avenge their blood and that of your brother and of all Jews murdered for being Jews. You will yet see your parents soon as I believe Moshiach Tzidkeinu is mamash in
our doorway and with this will come Techiyas Hameitim. May you and your siblings be comforted among the mourners of Zion in Jerusalem.

(6)
Anonymous,
July 30, 2002 12:00 AM

I have never been so moved nor so proud of one of my own, the words so moving and the sentiment so strong and pure from anyone irrespective of age, God bless you and keep you safe,Shalom

(5)
Penny Saracik,
July 30, 2002 12:00 AM

Ribono Shel Olam

Rav Dickstein taught Torah next door. He told his students he wouldn't be able to make it to their graduation party on Sunday, so it was held earlier on Thursday, his last Thursday in this world. Mrs. Dickstein often stayed up til 2am to study with our daughters before tests. Precious Tzofia, always so carefree, just completed a year of voluntary national service- now becomes a mother to her seven younger siblings.
Master of the World- please have mercy on us.

(4)
ISAAC BROWN,
July 30, 2002 12:00 AM

heartbreaking article

icried while reading this its hard to believe the way the world looks at whats happening in isreal ipray to hashem for my brothers and sisters in eretz yisroel may hashem ease their pain and bring us peace and a true geula

(3)
Anonymous,
July 30, 2002 12:00 AM

So sad, but beautiful

One who reads this article but does not have a tear come to their eye is not human. It is so painful for me to learn of all the terror going on throughout Israel and how it devastates families.

Let us all pray to G-d to comfort all of the mothers, daughters, sisters and brothers affected by this all too long upsurge of Palestinian terror.

None of the victims die in vain. May G-d avenge their blood and bring the redemption speedily in our time.

(2)
Anonymous,
July 30, 2002 12:00 AM

BS"D
My heart is broken for the situation. I want to comfort the mourners, the orphaned Dickstein children and others who are victims of this terrible war, but my words are limited.
My heart is very full. These days when I daaven the Amidah eyes are tearful as I emplore H* to please hear us and save us.
We ask H* to please send deliverance ... if not for our sake, then for the sake of His promise to the Avos.
May HKBH comfort you and keep you all.

(1)
deborah barrington,
July 29, 2002 12:00 AM

article

my eyes cry from just reading this article, my heart goes out to allthose who love israel yet know a sacrefice must be made tokeep israel may G-d be with all the children and give israel peace.

My Christian friends are always speaking about “faith.” To me this sounds a lot like blind faith. Is that really the essence of religion?

The Aish Rabbi Replies:

I'm afraid that this is another case of a Christian concept being mis-associated with Judaism.

Let's first define our terms. What is faith?

Webster defines faith as "Belief without proof."

What is knowledge? "An acquaintance with truth, facts or principles through study or investigation."

Faith is usually a product of desire. Have you ever gotten a tip on the market that guarantees you're going to triple your money in a month? A lot of smart people have gotten fleeced because they ignored the evidence and went with their feelings.

Knowledge, on the other hand, is based on evidence. We know there's a place called China because we have too many products in our house saying "made in China." There's a lot of evidence for the existence of China, even though most of us have never been there.

Judaism unequivocally comes down on the side of knowledge, not faith. In Deuteronomy 4:39, the Torah says: "You shall know this day, and understand it well in your heart, that the Almighty is God; in the heaven above and the earth below, there is none other." (This verse is also contained in the prayer, "Aleynu.")

This verse tells us that it is not enough to simply know in your head, intellectually, that God is the Controller of everything. You must know it in your heart! This knowledge is much more profound than an intellectual knowledge. God gave us a brain because he wants us to think rationally about the world, our role in it, and our relationship with God.

A conviction based on desire or feelings alone has no place in Judaism. The Hebrew word "emunah," which is often translated as faith, does not describe a conviction based on feelings or desire. It describes a conviction that is based on evidence.

Once this knowledge is internalized, it effects how a person lives. A person with this knowledge could transform every breathing moment into a mitzvah, for he would do everything for the sake of the heaven. But this is not a "knowledge," that comes easily. Only intensive Torah learning and doing mitzvahs can achieve this knowledge. Every word of Torah we learn moves us just a little bit closer to that goal. And everyone is capable of that.

To learn more, read "The Knowing Heart," by Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto (Feldheim.com). This entire book is an explanation of this verse!

In 350 BCE, the building of the second Holy Temple was completed in Jerusalem, as recorded in the biblical Book of Ezra (6:15). The re-building of the Temple had begun under Cyrus when the Persians first took over the Babylonian empire. The re-building was then interrupted for 18 years, and resumed with the blessing of Darius II, the Persian king whom is said to be the son of Esther. The Second Temple lacked much of the glory of the First Temple: There was no Ark of the Covenant, and the daily miracles and prophets were no longer part of the scenery. The Second Temple would stand for 420 years, before being destroyed by the Romans in 70 CE.

You shall know this day and consider it within your heart(Deuteronomy 4:39).

Business people who are involved in many transactions employ accountants to analyze their operations and to determine whether or not they are profitable. They may also seek the help of experts to determine which products are making money and which are losing. Such studies allow them to maximize their profits and minimize their losses. Without such data, they might be doing a great deal of business, but discover at the end of the year that their expenditures exceeded their earnings.

Sensible people give at least as much thought to the quality and achievement of their lives as they do to their businesses. Each asks himself, "Where am I going with my life? What am I doing that is of value? In what ways am I gaining and improving? And which practices should I increase, and which should I eliminate?"

Few people make such reckonings. Many of those that do, do so on their own, without consulting an expert's opinion. These same people would not think of being their own business analysts and accountants, and they readily pay large sums of money to engage highly qualified experts in these fields.

Jewish ethical works urge us to regularly undergo cheshbon hanefesh, a personal accounting. We would be foolish to approach this accounting of our very lives with any less seriousness than we do our business affairs. We should seek out the "spiritual C.P.A.s," those who have expertise in spiritual guidance, to help us in our analyses.

Today I shall...

look for competent guidance in doing a personal moral inventory and in planning my future.

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