Nuke the Punchline - The Emperor's New Phone

#5 Steve H: … he mostly uses it to play Candy Crush and watch Powerpuff Girls on Netflix.

#4 RAML: ...He took a number of online IQ tests. His avg. was 70.

#3 Jimmy:…that he suggested Verizon replace “Can you hear me now?” with “Let me be clear.” – but they told him to buzz off.

#2 walruskkkch: he really IS just phoning it in.

And my favorite straight line of the day was from blarg:

If the NSA Spied on Obama’s Phone, They’d Discover…those aren’t nude selfies – he thinks he’s wearing clothes that only smart people can see!

Cookies to blarg!

and today's best kiss uppers were walruskkkch and James:

If the NSA Spied on Obama’s Phone, They’d Discover…

walruskkkch:. . .the man is simply Jonesing for some Anonymiss cookies. [Huh! He'd best stop whining and submit some funny straight lines :)]James:. . . that he has a secret love on speed dial for when Moosh isn’t watching, but Anonymiss has his number blocked [Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! ]