2. Chapter 2: All M*A*S*H*ed Up

I don’t know how long I was out. I was told, later, 24 hours, but there is no way I can know for sure. The only thing I do know was that it was my heart monitor that woke me up. I remember slowly opening my one good eye (the other being covered by bandages at the moment), and seeing a bright light. I wondered for a few moments whether or not I was dead, but when I discovered that the light was of the fluorescent variety I quickly came to my senses. The next thing I discovered was that I couldn’t move very well. I tried moving my head around, but I found the neck brace made that a difficult endeavor. Trying to use my other senses I could feel that both legs and my left arm were completely immobilized in hard plaster casts and that my forehead and chest were completely covered in tape and gauze. I must have looked like a mummy to anybody who cared to look at the wreck I must have been. However, as far as feeling pain, I didn’t feel much. I considered for a moment painkillers, but one, it takes a lot of drugs to be pumped in me for me to take any notice and second, I didn’t feel numb or drowsy. The sound of my heart monitor kept on with its rhythmic beeping and it was at that moment I noticed that I wasn’t alone.

I moved my head around as far as I could. Standing at one corner of the room was a man dressed impeccably in a business suit. His blond hair sat perfectly atop a head that was tailor made for a model’s head. It was scanning downward that I could see that his eyes were golden. For the briefest instant a jolt of anxiety rushed through my body, it was my attacker, there to finish me off, but then I came to my senses. The hair was different, blond not honey blond, and this one was about an inch shorter than the one whom almost killed me. Recognition sparked in my mind, it was a familiar face. “Hello, here to finish me off old friend?” I tried to say, but all that came out was a combination of slurping and hissing sounds and it was at that moment that I realized my jaws were wired shut. “Damn! What part of me isn’t broken?” I thought to myself.

Now I digress from my narrative to mention a few things to you who might think I must be an idiot for not recognizing an immutable and immortal vampire that I have known for ages. I must say in my defense that I had just woken up from a mini-coma after being thrown from a ten story building and landing on a 1996 Nissan Altima, (I found out about the Altima later, don’t worry I paid the poor fella for his car). I wasn’t in the best frame of mind at the time. As to my outburst about my physical condition, please forgive me. I was a bit upset, but please don’t misinterpret this feeling into one of ungratefulness. I was quite happy to be alive. However, having your jaw wired shut does put a hamper on having intelligent conversation. Now back to the narrative.

Carlisle, who was my visitor, looked at me sadly, his stone face filled with worry and regret. “Don’t try to talk… What is it you go by now?”

Forgetting for a moment about my jaws’ condition I tried to respond, “Kyle Cooper,” but all I managed to get out was a kashhhhhhhh. Carlisle winced when I tried to talk again.

“I’m sorry, Edward will be here shortly. Then we can talk.” So he brought Edward. This was shaping up to be quite the reunion. I was planning on seeing them again, but I thought it would be under much different and unfortunately much worse circumstances. It was clear from his tone that he meant only to talk. He wouldn’t have come with company if he meant to kill me. I lie in my bed and waited. I didn’t try to speak any further and Carlisle just waited patiently. After a few minutes Edward entered. He looked just the same as I remembered all those years ago. He looked at me and then back to Carlisle and then back to me. He spoke, “Yes it has been awhile.” I was caught unaware for a moment, but I then I realized he was reading my thoughts.

At this moment I want to let you know that what follows will be a conversation between me and Carlisle with Edward reading my thoughts and speaking for me. During this entire conversation Edward did not interject with his own thoughts.

Carlisle began, “So what is it you go by now? The chart says Kyle Cooper, but is that a pseudonym?”

“It’s my alias. Let’s go back to what we’re more comfortable with.”

“Roger, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what Jasper would do? He didn’t know.”

“So that’s his name. The one who…”

“Yes, he and Alice joined us in 1950 after you left.”

“I can guess why he attacked me. How did he know though? I didn’t tell anyone anything.”

“That was Alice. She can see the future. Once you made your decision to come to Forks, she knew about it. She told him what you were planning and he went to stop you.”

“He did a pretty good job.” I paused gathering my thoughts. Edward remained silent until I and he were sure what I wanted to say next.

“Carlisle, I’m sorry too. I thought you were bent. I was just trying to fulfill my promise.”

“You thought I…” he said and then both he and I (through Edward) spoke the same word at the exact same moment, “Seattle!”

Carlisle looked at me with a pained expression, “You thought I… we were responsible for what happened in Seattle?”

“I at first thought nomads, but I didn’t think nomads would/could do that much damage in such a short time. A large coven could do that though. A large coven like yours could cause that much destruction in such a short time. Forgive me friend, but all signs pointed to you and your family.”

“All the signs… Tell me everything, right from the beginning.” I looked at Carlisle and back to Edward. Despite the fondness I felt towards Edward, having him poke around in my head was starting to be a tad uncomfortable. If Carlisle wanted to hear everything then he would hear it from me. With my free hand I moved to the wires that held my jaws shut. With not too much difficulty I managed to tear them off of me. I was glad that I was still strong enough to do so. Edward looked at me with a look of mixed awe and shock. Carlisle was less taken by my show of strength. I moved my jaws up and down and side to side. There was no pain and everything seemed in order. With that I began to speak for myself.

“No offense Edward, but having you as a mouth is a bit disturbing. I’ll manage by myself. Thank you though. Carlisle, where do you want me to start?”

“At the beginning, please.” I gave Carlisle a look of suspicion. Immediately catching what I meant, Carlisle added, “From where you decided to investigate the goings on in Seattle.”

“Okay then. Well it takes places over a year before your new son decided to mash me up…”