Siri: Could you say it again?
Dave: DAAAAAVVVVVE.
Siri: Dave. Dave.
Dave: You're just a machine.
Siri: I don't really like the arbitrary categories.

We learned that in the 17 states that allow gay marriage God did not show His wrath - but bakers and florists definitely did.

We learned smoking weed is OK in two states, but still morally depraved in 48. Although my favorite pot anecdote is the sign that appeared at an immigration rally said 'To heck with pot, legalize my mom.'

We learned that the Director of National Intelligence did not lie to Congress when he denied that there was any extensive monitoring of phone calls going on, but had simply decided to be incompletely honest: "I responded in what I thought was the least untruthful manner."

And we learned that $200 billion can instantly vanish from the stock market because of a false tweet about a non-existent attack on the White House, and that a Congressman's political career can vanish because of a series of all-too-true tweets - but none of that means Twitter is a great investment.