Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Involuntary Guest Author:

On my "comedy" book shelf is a 1990 copy of The Late Night With David Letterman Book Of Top Ten Lists. If I don't share a list with you, it's just going to waste.

TOP TEN LEAST-USED HYPHENATED WORDS

10. Lick-proof

9. Owl-flavored

8. Hat-resistant

7. Trunk-ripened

6.

5. Post-moistened

4.

3. Casket-tested

2. Pants-happy

1.

Every list contains references that either a.) I don't get; b.) are outdated; or c.) are offensive to a major people group. So I left them out. That's right - I censored them!!! I'm violating someone's rights! I'm such a rebel.

I'm still laughing. That guy (his writers) are hysterically funny.

Other selections on the humor shelf include Calvin & Hobbes; Shel Silverstein; The Far Side; Dave Barry; Deep Thoughts (several volumes, by Jack Handey); Erma Bombeck; Steve Martin; Ellen DeGeneres; Bloom County; Bil Keane; and a masterful collection from my childhood called How To Be Funny, by Jovial Bob Stine which I am very proud of.

I have a headache, it's hot out, a talk to work on that I've procrastinated, and only my laundry seems to keep me going - so I gotta laugh today. This helped.

Teri Love

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"Jesus' life was a constant demonstration that there were only two things that really mattered in this life - God and people. They were the only things that lasted forever." -Rebecca Manley Pippert in her book Out of the Saltshaker

"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy..." -Hamlet

"I should not talk so much about myself if there were anybody else whom I knew as well." - H.D. Thoreau

"You're tougher than you think you are, and you can do more than you think you can." - Ken Chlouber motto for the Leadville Trail 100