"There's a small knot forming in his stomach, a sort of burning sensation spreading in his lower belly that Jim does not like at all. His chest clenches in unease as he watches Selik's eyes slowly descend on his mouth.

The friendly vibe surrounding them until now disappears completely, leaving them with an atmosphere charged with a kind of tension that has Jim swallowing hard and nervously licking his lips.

Embarking upon the Five-Year mission with the Starfleet flagship, and the best and the brightest aboard her, it seems that Jim Kirk has it all. With Spock and Bones beside him, his physical recovery complete, he feels ready to take on the universe. But when Command orders the Enterprise into a diplomatic mission involving an unstable, warring planet, somebody is bound to get hurt. Adept at hiding both his demons and his affections, Jim is ready to do whatever it takes to be the Captain Pike wanted him to be, whether that involves sacrificing his happiness, or even his life.

Spock is held captive in a Cardassian facility and tortured for information. The only way he bears it is with the knowledge that at least Jim is safe. Unknown to him, they are forcing Jim to watch everything they do to his first officer.

This is going to be a multi-chapter fic. And it will be dealing with very dark themes. Darker than Finding Spock. Please heed the warnings if you are easily triggered.

Written for the KS Advent 2014, for the prompt: Kirk hates the Holidays (never had a good one in his childhood) and has no plans to attend the staff New Year's party. After nagging from Bones didn't change his mind, it comes down to Spock to logically point out to his captain all the benefits the crew will derive from their captain joining in. Kirk reluctantly attends and Spock sticks steadfastly at his side. Kirk realizes at the end of the night that he actually enjoyed it (mostly thanks to Spock's company). When Spock accompanies Kirk to his cabin and invites himself in, Spock unexpectedly produces a sprig of mistletoe and suggests (logically) that the evening isn't complete until the final tradition is observed.

Inspired by From this moment – Shania Twain https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-Lp2uC_1lg