How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing – The Best Way To Save Your Relationship On Your Own

When confronting a marriage crisis, this is one of the questions spouses ask: How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

How can I save my marriage if my partner does not want to help find a solution…?

Just how do I succeed I’m attempting to save my marriage by myself…?

It is a standard enough story: one partner leaves, the other stays. One remains “in love”, the other is uncertain. Whatever it is that has caused a couple to be apart, the 1 person who remains bears the possibility, uncertainty, fear, desire, hope of rescuing his or her marriage’ ALONE.

Considering there are two different people causing the overall health and well being of a marriage, shouldn’t both of you be present to decide to try and rescue it? Or, worse, when it’s his, or her, their fault consequently shouldn’t he, she, they be the ones to make amends? You’re only the victim here, after all!

The Best Way To Save Your Relationship All on Your Own How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

The first thing you need to know is, if you find yourself alone in this desire and if you would like to rescue your marriage, waiting for the other spouse to make the first move would be the beginning of the end.

Again, it’s likely to fail, if you are looking for someone to blame or somebody else to set the physical and psychological work in to saving the marriage. How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

The belief that the responsibility lies with another individual is a self-defeating mindset. It propagates the belief that there is NOTHING you can do to save your marriage and you ought to stand and see what’s your way.

NOT correct!

There’s still something you are able to DO. Even in your loneliness and solitude, you CAN save your marriage.

How…?

Let us start by analyzing what it means to be all on your own.

As human beings, we hate being alone. It’s a part of our genetic make up to become social creatures and create connections with other people, whether through friendships or romantic interest. How we connect with others of how we interact with individuals and the nature is a fundamental aspect of development that is psychological and personal. How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

The paradox is that as we grow older in trust the love, companionship, and support of our significant others, we develop an internal strength of self that makes us whole, happy human beings. Ideally, the mature human person should have developed a sense of self-awareness, confidence and self-esteem as she or he reaches adulthood. These become the windows with which we view the world, flaws and all. These make up part of our private shelter amidst challenges and difficulties. This is called SELF-ACTUALIZATION.

However, lots people enter into adult life without even being conscious of this beautiful, human truth. We could have experienced abandonment in our childhood or been disappointed by our romantic relationships.

whatever it is, it has caused to shift from appropriate mature development to fears of abandonment and the inability to find that we can stand on our own two feet.

Thus, many of us enter relationships and marriages with plan, the hope and dream that we’d never be lonely. We {invest so much in our partners and loved ones, focusing our entire beings on them and relying on them to make us happy and protected. Unfortunately, this perspective carries with it its own poison.

Subconsciously, we project the responsibility of our own life happiness on the other person, eloquently sidestepping taking responsibility for destiny and our life happiness.

Problems develop when a spouse indicates some kind of dissatisfaction with the relationship or the expectations unwittingly put upon them, and if they do so we panic. Our fears kick in, when our spouse leaves. When something goes wrong with our marriages, it is extremely easy for us to place the blame of the other person for having made us miserable.How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

So as to save your marriage when you’re the one doing it, the key then is a paradigm shift, meaning, the key is to change your mindset and focus. Stop focusing on your spouse – stop the blaming, stop the inaction.

Take a close look at yourself and what you can do in this moment. You can NOT control your partner’s feelings, attitude and reactions, but you can control your own. You can go from fearing abandonment to taking responsibility for yourself and your own happiness.

This is where the human truth about self-actualization comes in. Know, internalize and adapt this on your own. Learn it. It will spell the difference not only in your marriage but in YOU.

A whole human being is not difficult to love. A happy person attracts happiness. In beginning with yourself, you can move from being an unhappy hard person to a person who can offer an environment of security, wisdom, trust and open communication.

If each of you are able to self-sustain when it comes to taking responsibility for your own lifetime happiness, you both have much bags and more genuine love to bring into the relationship. Your motivation changes from being one of fear to being one of real love.

Try these tips to start your Personal transformation and lead your marriage to success Instead of beat yourself up in Despair:How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

Breathe…

Smile…

Let go…

Believe that reconnection is possible…

See a counselor for YOURSELF not just for your marriage

Examine your part in contributing to the difficulties in your marriage

Forgive yourself…

Change…

Look after your health, beauty, and well-being…

For all you know, your spouse (and you) may just rediscover the person that they first fell in love with and more. For all you know, this is the kind of you that would allow your partner to come back and initiate communication. When that happens, you have every opportunity to sit down with them, talk about your motivations, plans and feelings. You may even get to the real issues surrounding your marital issues and actually begin taking steps to work them through. How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

In being open and older, you could also provide an environment where love and intimacy can flourish once more. With all the confidence and sincerity you have gathered, take these steps. Plus one more. Even in your separation, conflict or difficulties, find it to continue showing her or him that you do and loving your partner. How To Fix A Marriage That Is Failing

Through small, subtle acts, like preparing a snack for him or her or spending some quality TV time, you can rekindle love in your marriage. They don’t need to be gestures, they just have to be sincere. And coming from the new you.