I was in Taco Hell earlier, a meal of last resort. While I was waiting for my order a gentleman approached me and said he needed a dime to order his meal. I assessed him and determined that my cash would be used for products the United States government deems inappropriate. So I said I didn't carry cash, despite having a number of dimes in my pocket. **** you, I thought!

But for some reason, I said the following: I only have plastic, but order whatever you want, it's on me.

He seemed a little skittish at the idea, I assume he craved that dime. Only enforced when the lady in front turned after finishing her order and my crack head said out of habit "do you have a dime? I'm a dime short for my order".

The lady turned and threw a number of coins (including dimes!) on the counter, and then took a seat, awaiting her order. My New companion eagerly gathered them. Remember this lady, her part is not yet done.

It was time to order, and the cashier eyed my knew friend suspiciously. I made a spastic gesture indicating I'd pay for the order.

"Hey man, you mind if I get a chalupa too?"

"Whatever you want, it's on me."

"What??? I just gave him money!" (The lady I told you not to forget)

"At least I know this is going to food."

She nods. We smile at each other.

So my policy from now on when someone asks me for cash is to offer food.

I had about 6 pieces of fried chicken left over from a catered lunch at my work so I gave them to a panhandler. A few steps later I turned back, to bask in the glory of my good deed as the poor fella devoured them with tears in his eyes. Instead, I saw him dumping them into the trash can and go right back to begging.

One time I was headed to my car with leftover b-dubs--and,boy, was I looking forward to eating those later--when I was approached by what I must assume was a homeless person who asked me if I was going to eat them. I gave the wings to him and he walked away, having already begun eating them.

I suppose he might not have been homeless and just liked wings. In any case I miss those wings.