MY ABP BH 2012 Experience : Part 1 : Why I Was There & What I Wore

On the night of
4th April 2013, my cousin Yeop Rizal and Yong Fasha Sandha came to
visit us at home together with my aunt, uncle and Rayqal. We had an awesome
dinner cooked by my mum. After dinner, all of a sudden she asked me whether I
could help her out as a favour. She said it was a work-related matter and that she
wanted me to go to Anugerah Bintang Popular Berita Harian (#abpbh) on her behalf.

I wasn’t sure. I
was very hesitant. It has been a while since I last went to any big events. Ever
since I came out of the hospital I have not been myself especially in places
with so many people. The most recent two events I went to, a wedding of a
friend and a dinner event on health in Jakarta, didn’t go too well for me. I
was overwhelmed by the occasion. By the crowds of people. By the loud noises.
By everything. There were just too many triggers that made me break down,
eventhough I was okay most of the time.

However at the
same time, I consciously realize that I have to fight this mental block. To try
and return to my normal self especially when it comes to being out of my own
home. My comfort zone. It takes a lot of effort. Every smile is a battle. Every
step outdoors is a struggle. People may not know how I feel inside as I’m
smiling almost all the time. (Especially in pictures) But it is very hard. But
I still try my very best.

After much persuasion
by Fasha and after a discussion with the husbandwe only agreed to represent them to ABPBH the next
day. I thought of wearing one of my Pu3 Designs long sleeved long dresses. Suddenly,
on Saturday the 6th of April, I received a whatsapp picture of the
invitation card. The theme was “Ledakan Geometri”. Yikes! (My best translation:
Geometrical Outburst?? I suppose..)

I became even
more nervous. I didn’t have anything to suit the theme. Plus it was formal blacktie!
Buying something to wear just for the event a day before was a big no-no, but I didn’t want
to stand out in the crowd. In the wrong way!!

When I received
the whatsapp I was actually on my way to a get-together with close friends at my friend Fahima
Salleh’s place before she goes off to perform her umrah. It was fun to meet my
sisters but part of me was still thinking about whether or not to go and what
to do about the theme. I didn’t realize it was that obvious because Hasanah
asked me with a concerned look, “What’s
wrong babe?”. Then I realized that I was being silly worrying over it so I
just explained to her.

I didn’t
anticipate their reaction. They were so excited for me and pushed me even further
to go. These girls knew of my episodes with big events but they insisted that I’ll
be okay. Seriously, they were cheering me on and rooted for me. They decided
that I was going and in less than an hour they decided what I should wear.
Hehe.

My bestfriend
Shereen Bahawi had something for me to wear, instantly, to go with the theme. She
had a geometrical patterned kurung dress made by Rizalman. She offered a matching
bag, shoes and gold bangle as well and Hasanah Hilmi told me she had juusttt
the right shawl to go with the whole look.

Yes, us sisters,
we share our clothes among other stuffs.

Continuous praises to the Creator for my God-sent sisters! Alhamdulillah.

So in the end I
wore everything they gave to me. My style directors, wardrobe managers,
cheerleaders and supporters all rolled into two beautiful souls. The only thing
that was mine was the inner from I Love Tudung which I find so comfortable and love
so much. It covers the neck so its really practical if I wear a lowcut dress
too. Since the sleeves were just a bit short for me, I also wore my navy blue inner
garment for the forearms which I bought in Jakarta recently.

I would probably
not have gone to the event if it weren’t for them, they encouraged me every
step of the way.

In the end, I'm glad I went. Thank you everyone!!! Will blog more about the event soon, God-willing.

Salaam,I'm from the uk and don't normally follow blogs esp hijab blogs as they annoy me but yours is perfect abit of fashion, abit of reflection abit of everything, randonly came across it when searching for a bag that i like. thanks maybe we in the UK can learn a thing or two from you!! Also love your makeup, can I buy that in the UK, all my eyeliners smudge and I look like a panda by the end of the day even though I wear minimalShama

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