Condo Living: Behave or go to Raiford Prison

Just outside the door of our condo in Hollywood Beach there is a fire extinguisher with an ominous warning: If you tamper with it you will go to RAIFORD PRISON. Apparently previous signs with mere warnings of incarceration did nothing to deter the elderly Jewish ladies from having wild foam parties. What the sign does not mention, however, is that the town of Raiford is home to both Union Correctional Institution AND Florida State Prison, leading to great confusion among residents. This is especially the case since Wikipedia states that both “house inmates in death row facilities, but only Florida State Prison does executions.” Keep the bastards guessing!