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PATRICK RESEARCH WORK ON FEMINISM 1 – THE CONCEPT OF FEMINISM: INTRODUCTION

THE CONCEPT OF FEMINISM: INTRODUCTION

After a long suffering and discrimination of woman in the society, she is nowadays playing an important role in society as a politician, socialist and economist. Those achievements emerged by the coming of feminism which granted woman’s rights.

This research work studies woman suffering, dehumanization and segregation by man. It deals also with the efforts of Feminism to change woman’s oppression in the entire world and to ask for her equal rights and existence in all the domains (politics, socialism and economy)

This research tries to see at what extend does feminism influence woman’s fighting path and to answer the following questions:

1. How was the situation of woman in the past? 2. What did feminism brought to woman? 3. Was feminism efficient to change woman’s life?

The questions asked in this research aims to find if feminism was able to change the stereotypical image of woman and to give her more opportunities to have a place in the society, this why this research hypothesis state that:

1. Feminism was able to eradicate the stereotypical image of woman.

2. It gave more chances to woman to be important members in the society.

After a long trip of making the world better by making new rules, inventing new things and changing ancient ideas and thoughts. Women were still struggling every moment and they were still looking for their rights. Feminism has generated an on-going debate in all over the world and it came to solve women’s problems and to put an end to the injustice treatment for them. It was the voice of women in times they were not able to speak or to express their feelings and wishes.

DEFINITION OF FEMINISM:

1.ACCORDING TO WIKIPEDIA

Feminism is a range of social movements, political movements, and ideologies that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve the political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes.
Whether as a theory, a social movement or a political movement, feminism specifically focuses on women’s experiences and highlights various forms of oppression that the female gender has subjected in the society.
Whether Feminism is considered as a social movement or a political movement, it specifically and mainly focuses on women’s experiences in her daily life, which she subjected to in the society. Since Feminists are able to feel and experience the pain and suffering of women they are totally convinced of what it means to be a “women” in Patriarchal societies. Feminists, therefore seek to remove all the barriers to equal social, political and economic opportunities for women and object to the notion that a women’s worth is determined principally by her gender and that women are inherently inferior, subservient or less intelligent than men.

2. ACCORDING TO MANY RESEARCHERS AND SCHOLARS:

A) Feminism refer it to the belief that women live an injustice life with no rights and no equality.
Zara Huda Faris explained this idea, as: “…Women need feminism because there are women who suffer injustice …”

B) Feminism represents women’s problems and suffering in addition to their dreams in equal opportunities in societies controlled by man i.e. his power, rules, wishes and orders. Lara Huda Faris added also:“…women have traditionally been dehumanized by a male dominated society, which they call patriarchy; and that has been always better to be a man…”

TYPES OF FEMINISM

Feminism is both an intellectual commitment and a political movement that seeks justice for women and the end of sexism in all forms. There are many kinds of feminism in which sometimes and each one of them gives principles and conditions for giving woman her rights.

1. LIBERAL FEMINISM

Liberal feminism is a particular approach to achieving equality between men and women. It emphasizes on the power of an individual Person to alter discriminatory practices against women. It is considered as the most important kinds of feminism, which works within the structure of society to integrate women into it.

Liberal feminism aims for individuals to use their own abilities and the democratic process to help women and men to become equal in the eyes of the law and in society. By organizing women into larger groups that can speak at a higher level, push for legislation, and raise awareness of issues, those taking a liberal feminist approach will use the resources and tools available in our society to advocate for change.

Liberal feminism witnessed several waves of changes that contributed in its development and its power throughout the history. The main thrust of liberal feminism is that an individual woman should be able to determine her social role with as great freedom as does a man. Feminism therefore has required removing the historic structure of patriarchal law that denied women’s civil rights.

The major emphasis of liberal feminism include:

Equality of women before the law, in educational and professional opportunities

Change in marriage laws, property rights

Equal pay for equal work

Protection from rape

Wife battering in the home

Liberation from all dehumanizing forces.

In short, it aims at bringing equality between women and men in the framework of the existing social systems.

2. RADICAL FEMINISM

Radical feminism is a philosophy emphasizing the patriarchal roots of inequality between men and women, or, more specifically, the social domination of women by men. Radical feminism views patriarchy as dividing societal rights, privileges, and power primarily along the lines of sex, and as a result, oppressing women and privileging men.Radical feminism is a movement that believes sexism is so deeply rooted in society that the only cure is to eliminate the concept of gender. It started to emerge in the late 1960s by the famous leaders Ti-Grace Atkinson and Shulamith Firestone. It denies the liberal feminism claim that the lack of political or civil rights causes women’s oppression.

WHAT MAKES IT ‘RADICAL’?

Radical feminists tend to be more militant in their approach (radical as “getting to the root”) than other feminists. A radical feminist aims to dismantle patriarchy rather than making adjustments to the system through legal changes. Radical feminists also resist reducing oppression to an economic or class issue, as socialist or Marxist feminism sometimes did or does.The reason this group gets the radical label is that they view the oppression of women as the most fundamental form of man’s domination, one that cuts across boundaries of race, culture, and economic class.

Radical feminism opposes patriarchy, not men. To equate radical feminism to man-hating is to assume that patriarchy and men are inseparable, philosophically and politically. (Although, Robin Morgan has defined “man-hating” as the right of the oppressed class to hate the class that is oppressing them.)

The major emphasis of radical feminism include:

A) ELIMINATION OF PATRIARCHY It aims is to challenge and overthrow patriarchy by opposing standard gender roles and oppression of women and calls for a radical reordering of society.

They raise the demand for the destruction of patriarchy. They believe they should be a shift from struggle for role and legal reforms to the destruction of patriarchy. The chief institution of patriarchy is the family and the family promotes patriarchy in the society.

It is a perspective within feminism that focuses on the patriarchy as a system of power that organizes society into a complex of relationships based on the idea that male supremacy oppresses women.

B) BIOLOGICAL REVOLUTION

This group of feminists claims that the root of women’s oppression is biological. They believe that the physical subordination of women by men is the primary form of oppression and others are secondary.Therefore, radical feminism believes that woman’s liberation requires a biological revolution. Radical feminism questions why women must adopt certain roles based on their biology, just as it questions why men adopt certain other roles based on gender.

They attempt to draw lines between biologically determined behavior and culturally determined behavior in order to free both men and women as much as possible from such gender roles.

Moreover, they believe that the whole system must be abolished even, its biological aspects. Radical feminism principles contains many interesting claims such as pregnancy and child birth in which they consider them as the most painful and unpleasant experiences that can person pass through.

They believe that the technology should be used to eliminate all kinds of pain particularly from the fundamental inequality of the bearing and rising of the children.

This must be the basic achievement because they believe that the heart of women’s oppression is their childbearing and childrearing roles.

Radical feminists believe that the male psychology or biology is the source of women’s oppression and pain. This is why they call for separation and the independence from men.

Women’s studies programs at universities are often supported by radical feminists.

QUOTES FROM RADICAL FEMINISTS

1. “All men hate some women some of the time and some men hate all women all of the time.” — Germaine Greer

2. “The fact is that we live in a profoundly anti-female society, a misogynistic ‘civilization’ in which men collectively victimize women, attacking us as personifications of their own paranoid fears, as The Enemy. Within this society it is men who rape, who sap women’s energy, who deny women economic and political power.” — Mary Daly

3. “I feel that ‘man-hating’ is an honorable and viable political act, that the oppressed have a right to class-hatred against the class that is oppressing them. — Robin Morgan

“In the long run, Women’s Liberation will of course free men—but in the short run it’s going to COST men a lot of privilege, which no one gives up willingly or easily.” — Robin Morgan

4. “Feminists are often asked whether pornography causes rape. The fact is that rape and prostitution caused and continue to cause pornography. Politically, culturally, socially, sexually, and economically, rape and prostitution generated pornography; and pornography depends for its continued existence on the rape and prostitution of women.” — Andrea Dworkin

5. Feminism is a theory, lesbianism is a practice.

I propose that the phenomenon of love is the psychological pivot in the persecution of women.

Love is the victim’s response to the rapist.

The institution of sexual intercourse is anti-feminist

Since the beginning of the Movement, lesbianism has been a kind of code word for female resistance.

-Ti-Grace Atkinson

6. We are unalterably opposed to the presentation of the female body being stripped, bound, raped, tortured, mutilated, and murdered in the name of commercial entertainment and free speech.

Pornography is the undiluted essence of anti-female propaganda.

Women are all female impersonators to some degree.

ALL men keep ALL women in a state of fear.

Who said that clothes make a statement? What an understatement that was. Clothes never shut up.

Women as a class have never subjugated another group; we have never marched off to wars of conquest in the name of the fatherland. We have never been involved in a decision to annex the territory of a neighboring country, or to fight for foreign markets on distant shores. These are the games men play, not us. We want to be neither oppressors nor oppressed. The women’s revolution is the final revolution of them all.

-Susan Brownmiller

7. Romanticism is a cultural tool of male power to keep women from knowing their conditions.

Feminism, when it truly achieves its goals, will crack through the most basic structures of our society.

(Male) culture was (and is) parasitical, feeding on the emotional strength of women without reciprocity.

Men are thinking, writing, and creating, because women were pouring their energy into those men; women are not creating culture because they are occupied with love.

All men are selfish, brutal and inconsiderate–and I wish I could find one.

He has let her in not because he genuinely loved her, but only because she played so well into his preconceived fantasies.

-Shulamith Firestone

8. Politically, I call it rape whenever a woman has sex and feels violated.

Feminism is built on believing women’s accounts of sexual use and abuse by men.

Women and men are divided by gender, made into the sexes as we know them, by the social requirements of heterosexuality, which institutionalizes male sexual dominance and female sexual submission.

Women are raped and coerced into sex.

Men, permitted to put words (and other things) in women’s mouths, create scenes in which women desperately want to be bound, battered, tortured, humiliated, and killed.

Empirically, all pornography is made under conditions of inequality based on sex, overwhelmingly by poor, desperate, homeless, pimped women who were sexually abused as children.

-Catharine MacKinnon

9. The complete destruction of traditional marriage and the nuclear family is the ‘revolutionary or utopian’ goal of feminism.

A sexual revolution begins with the emancipation of women, who are the chief victims of patriarchy, and also with the ending of homosexual oppression.

Many women do not recognize themselves as discriminated against; no better proof could be found of the totality of their conditioning.

The image of the woman as we know it is an image created by men and fashioned to suit their needs.

The concept of romantic love affords a means of emotional manipulation which the male is free to exploit, since love is the only circumstance in which the female is (ideologically) pardoned for sexual activity.

When one group rules another, the relationship between the two is political. When such an arrangement is carried out over a long period of time it develops an ideology (feudalism, racism, etc.). All historical civilizations are patriarchies: their ideology is male supremacy.

-Kate Millett

10. Passivity is the dragon every woman has to murder in her quest for independence.

Until all women are lesbians, there will be no true political revolution.

All women are lesbians except those who don’t know it.

-Jill Johnston

3. SOCIALIST FEMINISM

The phrase “socialist feminism” was increasingly used during the 1970s to describe a mixed theoretical and practical approach to achieving women’s equality. Socialist feminist theory analyzed the connection between the oppression of women and other oppressions in society, such as racism and economic injustice.Socialist feminism also known as Marxist feminism or Materialist feminism is an important movement of feminism. It calls for an end to capitalism through a socialist reformation of economy. Socialist feminism argues that capitalism strengthens and supports the sexist status because men are the ones who currently have power and money. Those men are more willing to share their power and money with other man, which means that women have fewer opportunities and resources. Therefore, they tried to eliminate the capitalist system and replace it with socialism, which collectively shares the wealth created by human labor.Sexism benefits the capitalism, by providing a supply of cheap labor for industry.

They believe that most oppressions women suffer in capitalist society include low paid, low status or even no paid work.

THE SOCIALIST FEMINISM BASIS The following are the basis of socialist feminist:

Socialists had fought for decades to create a more equal society that did not exploit the poor and the powerless in the same ways that capitalism did.

Like Marxism, socialist feminism recognized the oppressive structure of a capitalist society.

Like radical feminism, socialist feminism recognized the fundamental oppression of women, particularly in a patriarchal society.

Socialist feminists did not recognize gender and only gender as the exclusive basis of all oppression. Rather, they held and continue to hold that class and gender are symbiotic, at least to some degree, and one cannot be addressed without taking the other into consideration.

Socialist feminists wanted to integrate the recognition of sex discrimination within their work to achieve justice and equality for women, for working classes, for the poor and all humanity.

Socialist feminists reject the idea that liberation for women requires the abolition of childbirth. They seek to analyze the subordination of women as linked with other forms of oppression, and attempt to unite the fights for socialism with that for women’s liberation.

Under the socialist conditions, Marxist feminism believes that the restoration of women to autonomy is possible. Having equal salary for both man and woman was in the top of Socialist feminists‟ aims and demands.

Feminism is required to bring awareness of worth and abilities to women. Feminism is confused as a competition against masculinity and can only remain strong when the focus is on the value of the differing qualities. Individuals must recognize their worth before expecting recognition and must work with patient love to be heard.

“”””””” Feminism is required to bring awareness of worth and abilities to women. Feminism is confused as a competition against masculinity and can only remain strong when the focus is on the value of the differing qualities. “”””””””‘”

Here is another quote from my own personal renowned feminist to support what you said in your quote-

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book: We should all be feminist

“””””””” Some people ask: “Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?” Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women. “”””””””

Am happy you made such a comment on this post. I appreciate your time.

Thanks for the comment.

Some questions put to you here in the post where not answered.

I will like to ask a simple question for my fellow readers and viewers.

1. What is your own views and contributions on this articles?

2. Are you aware of existence of feminist and the movement feminism in your area? If so, explain

3. What are your perceptions of girls/women who call themselves feminist?

4. Do these girls/women that you know enjoy been a feminist?

5. Does culture in any way contribute/support to feminist and feminism?

Oh am touch by this comment, this blew me away. Thank you for taking the time to share these books written by her. That is lovely.

Thanks for that great quote you gave about the radical feminist woman.

Beautifully written and as I read through again on each line I was amazed .

This produced a smile on my tired face after a long day. You’re appreciated.

You are welcome Ms TIMI

#PATRICKSTORIES
Peace ✌and Love ❤

NOTE: “”” Ms “””” was attached here to your name because I believe you are a feminist and you run a feminist blog and also the way the popular FEMINIST Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi says in her book:

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

Here she says:

“”””””‘ Mrs’ is a title I dislike because Nigerian society gives it too much value. I have observed too many cases of men and women who proudly speak of the title of Mrs as though those who
are not Mrs have somehow failed at something. Mrs can be a choice, but to infuse it with as
much value as our culture does is disturbing. The value we give to Mrs means that marriage
changes the social status of a woman but not that of a man. (Is that perhaps why many women
complain of married men still ‘acting’ as though they were single? Perhaps if our society asked
married men to change their names and take on a new title, different from Mr, their behaviour
might change as well? Ha!) But more seriously, if you, a twenty-eight-year-old master’s degree
holder, go overnight frodo Ijeawele Eze to Mrs Ijeawele Udegbunam, surely it requires not just
the mental energy of changing passports and licences but also a psychic change, a new
‘becoming’? This new ‘becoming’ would not matter so much if men, too, had to undergo it.
I prefer Ms because it is similar to Mr. A man is Mr whether married or not, a woman is Ms
whether married or not.

Actually my blog is “anti-feminist on the grounds of equality between men and women”: where feminism become too prevalent then anti-feminism is in need to reach equality, because women tend to achieve equality while keeping the old privileges.
A good example being in the sentencing gap: women have equality under the law, women are not treated as a children, but still for the same crime women are sentenced WAY more leniently than men, using the old chivalry. The old system did make sense when women were dependent of men: less rights, less responsibility, less punishment. Now it doesn’t make sense, now it’s women have the same rights but less responsibility and less punishment, and that’s unfair towards men.

Egalitarian anti-feminism have more in common with “ideal feminism” than with actual western feminism: egalitarian anti-feminism claims that women must take responsibility, because with power it comes responsibility.
Egalitarian anti-feminsim claims that women must be ready to support eventual stay-at-home male partners.
Egalitarian anti-feminism claims that if a couple divorce, then children must stay 50% time with mothers and 50% time with fathers.

I have most Sheila Jeffrey’s books in my library.
I also had a gender studies class.

A) ELIMINATION OF PATRIARCHY
It aims is to challenge and overthrow patriarchy by opposing standard gender roles and oppression of women and calls for a radical reordering of society.

They raise the demand for the destruction of patriarchy. They believe they should be a shift from struggle for role and legal reforms to the destruction of patriarchy. The chief institution of patriarchy is the family and the family promotes patriarchy in the society.

It is a perspective within feminism that focuses on the patriarchy as a system of power that organizes society into a complex of relationships based on the idea that male supremacy oppresses women.

B) BIOLOGICAL REVOLUTION

This group of feminists claims that the root of women’s oppression is biological. They believe that the physical subordination of women by men is the primary form of oppression and others are secondary.
Therefore, radical feminism believes that woman’s liberation requires a biological revolution. Radical feminism questions why women must adopt certain roles based on their biology, just as it questions why men adopt certain other roles based on gender.

They attempt to draw lines between biologically determined behavior and culturally determined behavior in order to free both men and women as much as possible from such gender roles.

Moreover, they believe that the whole system must be abolished even, its biological aspects. Radical feminism principles contains many interesting claims such as pregnancy and child birth in which they consider them as the most painful and unpleasant experiences that can person pass through.

They believe that the technology should be used to eliminate all kinds of pain particularly from the fundamental inequality of the bearing and rising of the children.

This must be the basic achievement because they believe that the heart of women’s oppression is their childbearing and childrearing roles.

Radical feminists believe that the male psychology or biology is the source of women’s oppression and pain. This is why they call for separation and the independence from men.

Radical feminism is the very opposite of a biological revolution, since they oppose transgenderism, that is sex change and therefore biological revolution.

They also are afraid by artificial wombs, therefore they OPPOSE the idea technology should be used to eliminate all kinds of pain particularly from the fundamental inequality of the bearing and rising of the children.

In the 1970s, radical feminists such as Andrea Dworkin and Robyn Rowland have argued that artificial womb technology will lead to women’s demise. According them, as with any other reproductive technology, ectogenesis will fall in the hands of men, who will discard of women as they will no longer be the sole ones with the unique ability to bear children.
“If we develop an artificial womb, women will be stripped of their role of “mothers” – a status that continues to save many women even in the world’s most misogynistic societies.” they say.

“For the history of “mankind” women have been seen in terms of their value as child bearers. We have to ask, if that last power is taken and controlled by men (…) will women become obsolete?” Rowland writes. She warns that in the absence of the ability to bear children, women might be left with nothing to bargain with. In the most oppressive patriarchal societies, women are at least valued for their reproductive abilities. If they give up this right, they might expose themselves to unprecedented violence.

Even if she marry a poor man. She will still be popular and she will still be a well know feminist. Those are personal choice which we don’t have to question.

Questioning her goes against her fundamental human right to make a choice of what she like or whom aje want to spend her life with.

The phrase do not center on the status of man being poor or rich.

The man reason for that phrase – “The Personal is Political” goes in to 3 solid argument and
2 distinct standpoints.

3 solid argument

1. First, they argued that this “public” / “private” divide excluded women from politics (either coincidentally or purposefully) as men were generally considered public citizens while women were confined to the private sphere as housewives and mothers, and therefore the “the personal is political” as women should have a place in politics as well.

2. Second, they argued that “private” issues such as which partner in a marriage worked, domestic violence, and division of household labour are in fact political, as they are issues which concern the balance of power, and politics is about who has power, and how much, over who.

3. Third, they argued that “private” bodily concerns such as abortion, reproductive rights and freedom, contraception, rape, men’s entitlement to sex within marriage, childcare, and other such issues should be considered “political”, and therefore open to debate and legal address, as they directly affected women’s lives and their place in society.

2 distinct standpoints

1. politics should include women, who have historically been seen as private individuals.

2. politics should include a wider range of issues, including those historically considered to be private.

She made a political point by marrying a rich and famous doctor, since “The personal is political, also termed The private is political”.

“The private is poltical” is a philosophical approach and a worldview, it’s holistic.

Upholding “the personal is political” is a choice, and choices have consequences, and people must suit the standards they have freely choose.

Therefore you cannot apply “the personal/private is political” to many issues and then claiming that some choices are “purely private, purely personal”. It doesn’t work so, either you believe that personal choices aren’t a political matter, or you believe that the personal is political and therefore every personal choice could be questioned by the public.

I don’t know enough about Ngozi to classify her as radical or liberal feminist.

Regarding her personal choice, in example her marriage, she seems a conservative woman, not feminist at all.
Indeed in June 2018, Larissa MacFarquhar wrote, “the man she ended up marrying in 2009 was almost comically suitable: a Nigerian doctor who practiced in America, whose father was a doctor and a friend of her parents.”.
It’s a very patriarchal choice, nobody believes that she didn’t meet many different men around the world, she seems very conservative, more than the average conservative western woman.

Regarding gender, transexualism: she seems a conservative woman or a radical feminist. She’s a biological essentialist: she seems persuaded that women and men are totally different and there are more differences than similarities between women and men. Hence why she thinks that a woman surgically transtioning to man and getting hormones is still a woman, and she thinks that a woman surgically transtioning to man and getting female hormones is still a man. Such position is the same position of this man, a famous anti-LGBT, the USA vicepresident: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_Pence#LGBT_rights

She said that since transwomen have spent years living as men then they aren’t real women.
That’s like saying that a girl who spent her first 20 years without being feminist, cannot be called a feminist even if she has become a feminist. Since she lack experience living as a feminist and she pandered to patriarchy for 20 whole years.
Furthermore she downplays the fact that even before transition the transwomen behaved as women and were treated differently than other boys, often bullied for their feminine attitudes.

After reading much of your prove, now I understand what you mean by that “”” THE PERSONAL IS POLITICAL “””

In the other aspect about transgender, I totally agree with her. I agree with the statement made by her:

Firstly

“””””” She’s a biological essentialist: she seems persuaded that women and men are totally different and there are more differences than similarities between women and men. Hence why she thinks that a woman surgically transitioning to man and getting hormones is still a woman, and she thinks that a woman surgically transitioning to man and getting female hormones is still a man. “”””””””

Secondly

“””””. She said that since trans women have spent years living as men then they aren’t real women.

That’s like saying that a girl who spent her first 20 years without being feminist, cannot be called a feminist even if she has become a feminist. Since she lack experience living as a feminist and she pandered to patriarchy for 20 whole years.

Furthermore she downplays the fact that even before transition the trans women behaved as women and were treated differently than other boys, often bullied for their feminine attitudes. “””””””””

Those are real argument and its biology. Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are.

If “Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are” therefore men and women are different, and such the differences are not just only due culture as feminists allege, therefore equality of outcomes is impossible: in example women must be more suited for some disciplines, in example Humanities, and less suited for some disciplines, in example STEM.
If “Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are” therefore there must be a sex who is more suited to raise children. And it’s very likely to be women.
And so on.

Either men can become women and women can become men through a proper process
OR
The sexes are different, and nothing’s gonna change that.
THEREFORE, in the second case:
A sex is more suited for raising children and for Humanities
The other sex is more suited to defend children and for STEM.
THEREFORE
Gender roles make sense.

“Even with more women working outside of the home, equity in amount of and type of household tasks hasn’t changed.”

That’s uncorrect: every stat, even feminist-biased stats, show that the husbands contriubute much more than in the past to the chores.

Furthermore the phrase “household tasks” is misleading: who drive the family car carrying around the whole family? Men. This is not taken in account. Who do home maintenance and repairs and upgrades? Men. This is not taken in account. And so on.

Since I divorced I live alone and I do LESS household tasks compared to when I was married. Still my home is clean, I cook and I eat.

Am so sorry for the late response and reply. My schedule has been tight lately.

Thank you Mrs TIMI

I am happy to see your reply and rapid response. It gives me a thoughtful thinking and am happy for that.

In reference to question one, I don’t totally agree and support what you said about in your statement-

“””””””””” every stat, even feminist-biased stats, show that the husbands contriubute much more than in the past to the chores.

Furthermore the phrase “household tasks” is misleading: who drive the family car carrying around the whole family? Men. This is not taken in account. Who do home maintenance and repairs and upgrades? Men. This is not taken in account. And so on. “”””””””””

These point/statement is totally wrong because no reference was made or links that shows men contribute more in the past. You claims that statistics of men who do chores are high than women in the past but you didn’t give the least amount of evidence to or reason to back up this statement.

You just pointed few examples of what men do-
“””””” who drive the family car carrying around the whole family? Men. This is not taken in account. Who do home maintenance and repairs and upgrades? Men. “”””””””””

Again remember in the past, women stayed at home to do house chores and men went out to fetch what to eat or work.

At that time women don’t work at all. They do most of the house chores. So that statement-

(very stat, even feminist-biased stats, show that the husbands contriubute much more than in the past to the chores.) is a fallacy.

Most of them where subdue to stay at home against their wish. Most of them went to university back then. But the society feel women where not capable of handling offices,positions, politics and so on.

A woman can believe all this and still say: Given the actual real situation of my life, they choose to stay at home. The “why” and “how” of her life situation is still based on individual choices. But it doesn’t really matter when it comes to what makes sense for her. This is about individual choice. Not societal influence on the role of a women being at home.

These are the things women were questioned base on two factors-

Questioning whether one can be a “housewife” and a feminist
Here are the analysis-

1. Individual choice vs. societal influence-
Feminism generally pushes for equal opportunities. It does not demand that a woman work or it demands that a woman stay at home.
Being a housewife is not necessarily oppressing yourself. I personally think it is individual choice, if you look at these traditional housewife roles, fully aware of the implications, and decide you want to do it because that’s what you want to do.
With that being said, you can be a feminist no matter what your living situation is because it’s a movement. You can go out and work 70 hours a week with no family and be anti-oppression and pro-social justice. You can scrub floors and stay at home to make dinner for your children/ kids. You can be poor. You can be rich. Most of us are oppressed in some way anyway, so if oppression couldn’t coincide with a movement to end oppression, it wouldn’t exist.
As long as you’re aware of your privilege and your marginalization and you advocate for oppression on many levels to end, you can be a damn good feminist regardless of what path you’ve chosen in life.

If you are self-identify as a feminist, you almost certainly believe that women shouldn’t be forced to stay at home. You also probably believe that society influences women to stay at home in various ways—e.g., signaling that childcare is for women, having worse career options open for women, offering better maternal leave than paternal leave, etc. This is all about societal influence.

A woman can believe all this and still say: Given the actual real situation of my life, they choose to stay at home. The “why” and “how” of her life situation is still based on individual choice.But it doesn’t really matter when it comes to what makes sense for her. This is about individual choice.
As an extreme example, a woman in the 1950s hasn’t had access to the same career opportunities that her husband has. But given that her husband earns 5x what she does, or given that she just happens to enjoy spending time with the children more than her husband, it makes a lot more sense for her to stay at home. There is nothing unfeminist about that decision. Its just about individual choice.

2. Making money vs. controlling money
Moreover, her choosing to stay at home—to not collect a salary—does not mean that she is submitting control to her husband. I know plenty of men who are the sole/primary breadwinners as well as a few women who are. They do not “control” the money. Money is a team effort. The breadwinner may collect the salary, but their partner at home contributes as well.
I do know a few couples where, in practice, one partner has more control over the money. This has to do with the dynamics of their own situation—one partner being more of a better planner. It has no particular correlation with who’s earning the money.

Thanks again for your wonderful time and energy used in replying me.

Thanks for giving me an insight about all this feminism and anti feminist thing. Have gained a lot from you.

We weren’t speaking about the past nor about women forced to stay at home.

We were speaking about division of household tasks in modern couples, where both works.
Since men on the average work longer hours, then it’s natural that men do less household chores.
Plus I highlighted that the typical “male” chores are not listed among the chores in the surveys: proof that those surveys are biased.

Am really sorry for the late response to your comment.
Just be busy all this while.

Thanks for understanding our time difference.
Am so glad you commented on this topic and your contributions are well noted.

Getting a back up to this points made by you in your contributions.

“Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are” therefore men and women are different and such the differences are not just only due culture as feminists allege, therefore equality of outcomes is impossible “””””””

That statement is divided in to 2.

Firstly, Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are” therefore men and women are different

Secondly, such the differences are not just only due culture as feminists allege, therefore equality of outcomes is impossible

– DETAILS ON THE FIRST STATEMENT –

“”””” Transitioning in to man and woman. Still not gonna change who you are” therefore men and women are different “”””””

The first statement is true, man and woman are totally different. Which I know already.

This is what Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie have to say about being different.

I got like 2 back up on it.

1. FIRST BACK UP-

According to a popular literature book “”” we should all be feminist “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” Men and women are different. We have different hormones and different sexual organs and different biological abilities—women can have babies, men cannot. Men have more testosterone and are, in general, physically stronger than women. There are slightly more women than men in the world—52 percent of the world’s population is female— but most of the positions of power and prestige are occupied by men. The late Kenyan Nobel peace laureate Wangari Maathai put it simply and well when she said, the higher you go, the fewer women there are.
In the recent US elections, we kept hearing of the Lilly Ledbetter law, and if we go beyond that nicely alliterative name, it was really about this: in the US, a man and a woman are doing the same job, with the same qualifications, and the man is paid more because he is a man.

So in a literal way, men rule the world. This made sense—a thousand years ago. Because human beings lived then in a world in which physical strength was the most important attribute for survival; the physically stronger person was more likely to lead.
And men in general are physically stronger. (There are of course many exceptions.)

Today, we live in a vastly different world. The person more qualified to lead is not the physically stronger person. It is the more intelligent, the more knowledgeable, the more creative, more innovative. And there are no hormones for those attributes. A man is as likely as a woman to be intelligent, innovative, creative. We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.Not long ago, I walked into the lobby of one of the best Nigerian hotels, and a guard at the entrance stopped me and asked me annoying question-what was the name and
room number of the person I was visiting? Did I know this person? Could I prove that I was a hotel guest by showing him my key card?—because the automatic assumption is that a Nigerian female walking into a hotel alone is a sex worker. Because a Nigerian female alone cannot possibly be a guest paying for her own room.

A man who walks into the same hotel is not harassed. The assumption is that he is there for something legitimate. (Why, by the way, do those hotels not focus on the demand for sex workers instead of on the ostensible supply?)

In Lagos, I cannot go alone into many reputable clubs and bars. They just don’t let you in if you are a woman alone. You must be accompanied by a man. And so I have male friends who arrive at clubs and end up going in with their arms linked with those of a complete stranger, because that complete stranger, a woman out on her own, had no choice but to ask for “help” to get into the club

“”””””

2. SECOND BACK UP

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions
“””

In her 15 suggestion, she says:

“””””””””” Teach her about difference. Make difference ordinary. Make difference normal. Teach her not
to attach value to difference. And the reason for this is not to be fair or to be nice but merely to
be human and practical. Because difference is the reality of our world. And by teaching her
about difference, you are equipping her to survive in a diverse world.
She must know and understand that people walk different paths in the world and that as long
as those paths do no harm to others, they are valid paths that she must respect. Teach her that
we do not know – we cannot know – everything about life. Both religion and science have
spaces for the things we do not know, and it is enough to make peace with that.

Teach her never to universalize her own standards or experiences. Teach her that her
standards are for her alone, and not for other people. This is the only necessary form of
humility: the realization that difference is normal. “”””””””””””””””””

-DETAILS ON THE SECOND STATEMENT-

such the differences are not just only due culture as feminists allege, therefore equality of outcomes is impossible

This is what Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie have to say about culture and social norms.

I got like 2 back up on it.

1. FIRST BACK UP

According to a popular literature book “”” we should all be feminist “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””” Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture. “””””””””

2. SECOND BACK UP

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions
“””

In her 11 suggestions, she says:

“”””””” Teach her to question our culture’s selective use of biology as ‘reasons’ for social norms.
I know a Yoruba woman, married to an Igbo man, who was pregnant with her first child and
was thinking of first names for the child. All the names were Igbo.
Shouldn’t her children have Yoruba first names since they would have their father’s Igbo
surname? I asked, and she said, ‘A child first belongs to the father. It has to be that way.’ We often use biology to explain the privileges that men have, the most common reason being
men’s physical superiority. It is of course true that men are in general physically stronger than
women. But if we truly depended on biology as the root of social norms, then children would
be identified as their mother’s rather than their father’s because when a child is born, the parent
we are biologically – and incontrovertibly – certain of is the mother.

We assume the father is
who the mother says the father is. How many lineages all over the world are not biological, I
wonder?

For many Igbo women, the conditioning is so complete that women think of children only as
the father’s. I know of women who have left bad marriages but not been ‘allowed’ to take their
children or even to see their children because the children belong to the man. We also use evolutionary biology to explain male promiscuity, but not to explain female
promiscuity, even though it really makes evolutionary sense for women to have many sexual
partners – the larger the genetic pool, the greater will be the chances of bearing offspring who
will thrive.

So teach Chizalum that biology is an interesting and fascinating subject, but she should never
accept it as justification for any social norm. Because social norms are created by human
beings, and there is no social norm that cannot be changed. “”””””””””””””””””””

This is my own contribution or reply to what you said in the comment box.

There are more male babies who are born: 106 male babies every 100 female babies.
Then males die more than females, because life’s generally harsher for males.
That’s why there are 52% women: women survive more.
And that’s also why more men reach the top: harsher selection.

“in the US, a man and a woman are doing the same job, with the same qualifications, and the man is paid more because he is a man.”
Nope, those stats are the average salary of all men and all women, it’s not “for doing the same job”: otherwise capitalists would hire just only women, because women would be cheaper.
Men work in more dangerous jobs (that’s why 97% deaths in the workplace are men) and for longer hours: more pay, more deaths.

“I know of women who have left bad marriages but not been ‘allowed’ to take their children or even to see their children because the children belong to the man.”

In the west the above happens to men: I know many men who have left bad marriages but not been allowed even to see their children because the children belong to the woman.
One of the propeller forces of anti-feminism is indeed separated fathers who can’t see their children.
Every one of them would rather prefer the Nigerian system, since after their experience they know that fairness do not exist.

Actually about equality in your statement. I will love to say something about it.

“””” equality of outcomes is impossible “””””

From definition- Equality is the state of being equal, especially in status, rights, or opportunities.

Equality is not about physical structure.

I really liked this comment. And I do not believe men and women should be “forced” to be the same. And I don’t think the fact that we are not the same is a problem but the problem is about understanding on each part of men and women. There are still inequalities, stereotypes and problems in society – many affect women more and some affect men more.

Much of this unfavoured part and placement of women in the society lead to the rise of FEMINISM.

FEMINISM is simply about EQUALITY. That’s it, equality. It’s not a scary thing, its simply about having men and women treated with equal respect, getting equal pay for the same job, having an equal voice in society and having equal freedoms. That’s it. It’s not threatening anyone, just as equal rights should never be dependent on the colour of your skin, your ethnicity, religion or lack of, sexual orientation, cultural background, etc.

It also should never be dependent on your gender. If women are angry about not having equal rights, that is not only understandable but should never be misinterpreted as hatred, the same way that the civil rights movement were understandably angry that people of colour were being denied basic human rights because of the colour of their skin. As a wider society, we all have a part to play in ensuring that ALL people have equal rights and equal pay and same fairness.

It is very wrong but more wrong is to accept others opinions about how women are weak and have NO place in the society.

It’s still truly astonishing and downgrading, the mentality that women should be less than men in any circumstance, be it job position, salaries, etc. May be someday (sooner than later) that both women and men can be respected equally.

I know its not easy to make man and woman to be equal in all round in the society. Men and women are different in all area.

I keep saying this any where I go. For me my own point on this matter of EQUALITY

PatrickStories Quotes

1.

“””””” I was brought up by a mother who inculcated in me a deep respect for women. I believe that the inequality that women have faced through the centuries and today as well is a failure of all societies, and especially the mindset of male patriarchy. I cannot call myself anything other than a person who believes strongly in justice and gender-rights for women everywhere. It would be arrogant of me to call myself a feminist, though I believe strongly in the cause of the emancipation of women in all societies that repress women and pursue the same practices of male domination. “”””

2.

“””””” I hate being subjected to particular assault or being grouped as “women and children” while there are lots of things that show that I have quality features to make me valuable as a strong individual, not being grouped as weak because I’m female. Maybe physically, intellectually, etc. “””””””

CONCLUSION-

But for me personally, I believe in advocating for gender equality because despite the fact that we are all human, in some areas the treatment women receive varies from men in the society we found ourselves.

For me working together will bring better results. They need to function as one to succeed. Same for anything else. We do have our own “functions” to do. Man matters. Woman matters. We all matters.

It’s all about togetherness and bringing about mutual relationship between both of them.

Men & Women both are the beautiful part of the nature and even though here everyone is unique and alone but this is inter-connected. That fabric which connects is missing. That is fabric of love, respect and care for fellow beings.

Thanks for your contributions on this post. They are well thoughtful and noted

Equality is not about rights nor opportunities according western feminists, since women already have equal rights and equal opportunities: it’s about having the same number of male and female CEOs, or journalists, or university professor.
But not the same number of primary school teachers: in such case they’re 98% women and therefore the feminists don’t want equality, they blame the men for not being interested.
“women and children” is commonly used y feminists in the west while asking tougher laws “to protect women and children” (from men, of course).
In some airlines men cannot sit near unaccompanied children, just only women can do:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Airline_seating_sex_discrimination_controversy
“Four airlines; British Airways, Qantas, Air New Zealand and Virgin Australia, have attracted criticism for their controversial seating policies which discriminate against adult male passengers on the basis of their sex. These four companies refused to allow unaccompanied children to be seated next to adult males on their flights, leading to criticism that they regard all men as a danger to children.”
And that’s how a feminist look like in the west:
New South Wales Commissioner for Children and Young People, Gillian Calvert, stating that there were more male sex offenders than female, and thus “in the absence of any other test, it’s one way in which the airline can reduce the risk of children travelling alone”. She believes that the likelihood of an attack was rare, but not impossible, claiming “it’s only a few men who do this sort of stuff, but when they do it they diminish all men”.
All men should be discriminated according her. Even if pedophiles are less than 0.4% men – women are much less but rape of children by women are wildly undereported, so the real numbers are very likely to be close.

Actually about equality in your statement. I will love to say something about it.

“”””Equality is not about rights nor opportunities according western feminists, since women already have equal rights and equal opportunities: it’s about having the same number of male and female CEOs, or journalists, or university professor. “””””

From definition- Equality is the state of being equal, especially in status, rights, or opportunities.

So you are kind of contradicting the definition itself.

Much of this unfavoured part and placement of women in the society lead to the rise of FEMINISM.

FEMINISM is simply about EQUALITY. That’s it, equality. It’s not a scary thing, its simply about having men and women treated with equal respect, getting equal pay for the same job, having an equal voice in society and having equal freedoms.

Back to this link you sent here-

In some airlines men cannot sit near unaccompanied children, just only women can do:

These occurrence do not have any connection with feminism. Those policy where made based on steady occurrence of such case. Like you said in your comment-

“””” Even if pedophiles are less than 0.4% men – women are much less but rape of children by women are wildly undereported, so the real numbers are very likely to be close. “”””””

That is right for the aviation industry to do. They are trying to prevent child abuse and rape cases.
That is a proper thing to do.

Feminism is not a movement for men haters(misogynist). That’s it. It’s not threatening anyone, just as equal rights should never be dependent on the colour of your skin, your ethnicity, religion or lack of, sexual orientation, cultural background, etc.

Thanks for your contributions on this post. They are well thoughtful and noted

This policy have everything to do with feminism: it’s feminists who depict men as dangerous to women and children.
Nobody else.
Just google “assisted violence”, then check the first 10 links: most of them are feminists saying that men are a threat to women and children.
While actually mothers commit more violence on children, comparedto fathers.

No, there’s no such thing as “pedophilia stats in the aviation industry”, we barely know general stats, and those are:
Between 0.3% and 0.8% men are believed to be pedophiles.
Between 0.1% and 0.4% women are believed to be pedophiles.
Women’s pedophilia is also know to be more underreported than men’s.

So it’s about discriminating ALL men on the basis that a very tiny minority of men are pedophiles, but not discrimination women on the basis that just ony a very tiny minority of men are pedophiles.

“Assisted violence” also refers to children viewing fathers beating the mothers.

In both meaning “assisted violence” it’s a typical feminist concept, AS YOUR LINKS PROVES since ALL the three organizations are heavily influenced / informed by Women’s Studies / Gender Studies therefore “feminist ideology”.

Example: from your SECOND link:
“In this piece, FEMINIST writer Soraya Chemaly examines the ways in which women’s rights and expression are affected by persistent and often violent online harassment related to their gender, class, race, sexuality and more through an intersectional lens….”

So, saying that those three organizations are unrelated to feminism is like saying that socialists and communists are unrelated with marxism.

It’s feminist ideology, just like The Duluth Model: the Duluth Model establish that if a woman beat her male partner then it’s the male partner’s fault since she have to be a victim of previous domestic violence by him.

For me ,Feminism is not about discrimination. Everybody has there own concept of feminism.

From Wikipedia-
Feminism is a range of social movements, political movements, and ideologies that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve the political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes.

I understand what you said in your assisted violence.
But most of this assisted violence are committed towards women and girls.

“In this piece, FEMINIST writer Soraya Chemaly examines the ways in which women’s rights and expression are affected by persistent and often violent online harassment related to their gender, class, race, sexuality and more through an intersectional lens….”

Definition of feminism
1: the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
2: organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests

You missed the second…

https://www.britannica.com/topic/feminism
Feminism, the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes. Although largely originating in the West, feminism is manifested worldwide and is represented by various institutions committed to activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests.

Social equality is a state of affairs in which all people within a specific society or isolated group have the same status in certain respects, possibly including civil rights, freedom of speech, property rights and equal access to certain social goods and social services. However, it may also include health equality, economic equality and other social securities. Social equality requires the absence of legally enforced social class or caste boundaries and the absence of discrimination motivated by an inalienable part of a person’s identity.[1] For example, sex, gender, race, age, sexual orientation, origin, caste or class, income or property, language, religion, convictions, opinions, health or disability must absolutely not result in unequal treatment under the law and should not reduce opportunities unjustifiably.

Equal opportunities is interpreted as being judged by ability, which is compatible with a free market economy. Relevant problems are horizontal inequality − the inequality of two persons of same origin and ability and differing opportunities given to individuals − such as in (education) or by inherited capital.

Here is a quote from chimamanda adichie Ngozi about equality.

“””” Because when there is true equality, resentment does not exist. “”””

I believe that equality isn’t and shouldn’t be the back bone of feminism. Women are subjected to so much Sexual and gender based violence, discrimination and sexual harassment/sexism which cannot be eradicated just by achieving equality.

That is actually true, whether women achieve that EQUALITY with men or not. They will be subjected to;
1. Sexual and gender based violence
2. Discrimination
3. Sexual harassment
4. Sexism

“but not discrimination women on the basis that just only a very tiny minority of women are pedophiles.”

However I think that feminism have two goals:

1) freeing women from sexist stereotypes affecting women.

2) exploiting and reinforcing sexist stereotypes affecting men.

In the west the second is prevalent, since the first goal have been largely reached (though not totally reached).
Probably in Nigeria the situation is reversed, like it was 40 years ago, and the priority for African feminists is the first goal.
Still, they even have the second goal.

As long as the first goal is preminent, then feminism can look nice, but when the second goal become clear, then anti-feminism arise.
Anti-feminism can be egalitarian or male-supremacist but hostility from feminism is almost the same in both cases: equality is enemy to modern feminism, more or less like male supremacy is enemy to feminism in general.

The right wotd for “man-haters” is “misandrists”.
Misandry have its page on wikipedia:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Misandry
Including a chapter
“Misandry within the feminist movement”
I also suggest to check the “see also” section, you will find:
Separatist feminism
Female chauvinism
Feminazi

And the expression “male violence” and “male violence against women” are hate speech, just like it would be hate speech, in example: “black violence” or “black violence against whites” (it sounds weird, but think about USA: they still have problems with racism).

You can get a proof that “male violence” and “male violence against women” by speaking with feminists: if you speak to them about “female violence against children” or “female violence against children and the elders” then feminists get angry and try to shut up you. Because they know that the genderization of a crime (just like the racialization of a crime) is a form of hatred and an unfair attack.

Discrimination is an action, not a feeling.
Banning men to sit next children is discrimnation, and it also subtly suggest that women are better suited than men to care of the children.
Since women are better suited to take care of children, then stay-at-home women make sense.

See?
Sexism against men reverbers in sexism against women.
A lot of feminists are blind because they’re happy when men are discriminated, they think it’s a sort of retribution, but they do not realize that sexist discrimination against men enforce the opposite stereotype on women.

Let’s try:
* Men are a threat to children = women aren’t a threat to children = women should take care of children = women should stay at home to take care of children.
* Men are dangerous sexual predators = women don’t want sex / want sex far less than men = women should remain chaste.

It doesn’t matter the climbing on mirror: feminists can’t have it both ways.
Either revenge through cheering at sexist discrimination against men
OR
Erasing stereotypes and therefore gender roles.

It’s not going to work both way: it’s impossible and even unthinkable that it could work both ways.

Am so sorry for the late response and reply. My schedule has been tight lately.

Thanks for your contributions on this topic.

Looking at your first part of your reply. It centered much on discrimination.

“”””” Discrimination is an action, not a feeling.
Banning men to sit next children is discrimnation, and it also subtly suggest that women are better suited than men to care of the children.
Since women are better suited to take care of children, then stay-at-home women make sense. “”””””

Am able to split it in to 3 for more understanding.

1. Discrimination is an action, not a feeling.

2. Banning men to sit next children is discrimnation, and it also subtly suggest that women are better suited than men to care of the children.

3. Since women are better suited to take care of children, then stay-at-home women make sense.

Firstly, Discrimination is an action, not a feeling.

I totally underpinned that statement.

According to Wikipedia-

discrimination is prejudiced treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction towards, a being based on the group, class, or category to which they are perceived to belong. These include age, caste, colour, criminal record, height, disability, ethnicity, family status, gender identity, generation, genetic characteristics, marital status, nationality, race, religion, sex, sexual orientation, social class, and species.

Secondly,

“””” Banning men to sit next children is discrimnation, and it also subtly suggest that women are better suited than men to care of the children. “”””

From my own view its not discrimination. Its just a PREVENTIVE MEASURES to stop future reoccurrence of such. No parent will be happy seeing there own children molested or abuse.

I will support her for that: New South Wales Commissioner for Children and Young People, Gillian Calvert, stating that there were more male sex offenders than female, and thus “in the absence of any other test, it’s one way in which the airline can reduce the risk of children travelling alone”. She believes that the likelihood of an attack was rare, but not impossible, claiming “it’s only a few men who do this sort of stuff, but when they do it they diminish all men”.
All men should be discriminated according her. Even if pedophiles are less than 0.4% men – women are much less but rape of children by women are wildly undereported, so the real numbers are very likely to be close.

But for this statement she said “””” All men should be discriminated according her. “””

I don’t underpinn such. I need a prove or a link to such statement.

If she said such. I guess she is way back against the reason why the movement was formed.

Here In my view, feminism is not necessarily about just letting women do whatever they want, as women can be oppressive and feminism is about liberty from oppression. It’s a complicated movement with a lot of goals and a lot of layers.

Feminism obviously has a lot to do with examining gender roles, and women are under constant judgement for their decisions. Whether they take more traditional roles or more non-traditional roles, someone always has something negative to say about it, including misinformed feminists like Gillian Calvert.

Feminism is about freedom and liberty from oppression to me, not freedom and liberty to do anything in the world.

Off topic-

If the banning of men sitting close to children was applied in government hospitals.

I guess this man could not have done such a thing to her or even have a way doing such in hospital.

Here is a case study of a women in India- Aruna Shanbaug.

Aruna Ramchandra Shanbaug (1 June 1948 – 18 May 2015), was an Indian nurse who was at the centre of attention in a court case on euthanasia after spending 42 years in a vegetative state as a result of sexual assault.

Her saying discrimination was not really her fault. Maybe she has experience such before. I support her for placing such rule in the aviation industry.

Thirdly

“””” Since women are better suited to take care of children, then stay-at-home women make sense. “””””

Any women can stay in home base on some personal decision or some cogent reasons been known to her. So women staying at home is not enough reason to say that is a role of a women.

A woman can believe all this and still say: Given the actual real situation of my life, they choose to stay at home. The “why” and “how” of her life situation is still based on individual choices. But it doesn’t really matter when it comes to what makes sense for her. This is about individual choice. Not societal influence on the role of a women being at home.

Most of my female friends (and many of my male friends) would self-identify as feminists. Some work, some stay at home to care for the children (yes, some men stay at home with the kids, too!). There is no contradiction there.

1. Individual choice vs. societal influence-
Feminism generally pushes for equal opportunities. It does not demand that a woman work or it demands that a woman stay at home.
Being a housewife is not necessarily oppressing yourself. I personally think it is individual choice, if you look at these traditional housewife roles, fully aware of the implications, and decide you want to do it because that’s what you want to do.
With that being said, you can be a feminist no matter what your living situation is because it’s a movement. You can go out and work 70 hours a week with no family and be anti-oppression and pro-social justice. You can scrub floors and stay at home to make dinner for your children/ kids. You can be poor. You can be rich. Most of us are oppressed in some way anyway, so if oppression couldn’t coincide with a movement to end oppression, it wouldn’t exist.
As long as you’re aware of your privilege and your marginalization and you advocate for oppression on many levels to end, you can be a damn good feminist regardless of what path you’ve chosen in life.

If you are self-identify as a feminist, you almost certainly believe that women shouldn’t be forced to stay at home. You also probably believe that society influences women to stay at home in various ways—e.g., signaling that childcare is for women, having worse career options open for women, offering better maternal leave than paternal leave, etc. This is all about societal influence.

As an extreme example, a woman in the 1950s hasn’t had access to the same career opportunities that her husband has. But given that her husband earns 5x what she does, or given that she just happens to enjoy spending time with the children more than her husband, it makes a lot more sense for her to stay at home. There is nothing unfeminist about that decision. Its just about individual choice.

2. Making money vs. controlling money
Moreover, her choosing to stay at home—to not collect a salary—does not mean that she is submitting control to her husband. I know plenty of men who are the sole/primary breadwinners as well as a few women who are. They do not “control” the money. Money is a team effort. The breadwinner may collect the salary, but their partner at home contributes as well.
I do know a few couples where, in practice, one partner has more control over the money. This has to do with the dynamics of their own situation—one partner being more of a better planner. It has no particular correlation with who’s earning the money.

Going further in to your comment- I saw some important words.

“”””””” Sexism against men reverbers in sexism against women.
A lot of feminists are blind because they’re happy when men are discriminated, they think it’s a sort of retribution, but they do not realize that sexist discrimination against men enforce the opposite stereotype on women.

Let’s try:
• Men are a threat to children = women aren’t a threat to children = women should take care of children = women should stay at home to take care of children.

It doesn’t matter the climbing on mirror: feminists can’t have it both ways.
Either revenge through cheering at sexist discrimination against men
OR
Erasing stereotypes and therefore gender roles.
It’s not going to work both way: it’s impossible and even unthinkable that it could work both ways. “”””””””””””””””””

This last part of your comment/reply centered on sexism, gender roles and stereotypes.

—– SEXISM ——–

I know sexism has been a problem to feminist all this years.

Let me start with the definition for a proper understanding.

According to Wikipedia-

Sexism is prejudice or discrimination based on a person’s sex or gender. Sexism can affect anyone, but it primarily affects women and girls. It has been linked to stereotypes and gender roles, and may include the belief that one sex or gender is intrinsically superior to another.

Here is what my own renowned feminist have to say about SEXISM-

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””“It’s that I feel lonely in my fight against sexism, in a way that I don’t feel in my fight against racism. My friends, my family, they get racism, they get it. The people I’m close to who are not black get it. But I find that with sexism you are constantly having to explain, justify, convince, make a case for.””””””

Sexism lead to patriarchy society, gender roles and stereotype which we have now.

Anybody can be a sexist. But it typically affect women and girls.

In terms of patriarchy, this was the major aim of radical feminist

– ELIMINATION OF PATRIARCHY –
It aims is to challenge and overthrow patriarchy by opposing standard gender roles and oppression of women and calls for a radical reordering of society.

They raise the demand for the destruction of patriarchy. They believe they should be a shift from struggle for role and legal reforms to the destruction of patriarchy. The chief institution of patriarchy is the family and the family promotes patriarchy in the society.

It is a perspective within feminism that focuses on the patriarchy as a system of power that organizes society into a complex of relationships based on the idea that male supremacy oppresses women.

For me personally I still grow up in a patriarchal society(male dominance) where all decision where made by male both in marriages, relationships and jobs.

I got tired on how women where treated I felt the pain in me. So I started advocating for gender right and women right.

The society again has made male patriarchy’s so important that women are not given any position. Again also in terms of power and authority, the society has made men as the point to handle such. Even in the school setting, government establishment and private firm. Women are seen as less and weak to accept such position.

I have to back up it by using 2 quotation from FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi

1st QUOTATION:

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””””””” But here is a sad truth: our world is full of men and women who do not like powerful
women. We have been so conditioned to think of power as male that a powerful woman is an
aberration. And so she is policed. We ask of powerful women – is she humble? Does she
smile? Is she grateful enough? Does she have a domestic side? Questions we do not ask of
powerful men, which shows that our discomfort is not with power itself, but with women. We
judge powerful women more harshly than we judge powerful men “””””””””

Because of the ideal of power, authority and patriarchy’s, this again gave rise to different opinion to make women agitating for gender equality thereby forming the word FEMINISM and FEMINIST.

2nd QUOTATION:

According to a popular literature book “”” we should all be feminist “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””” Men and women are different. We have different hormones and different sexual organs
and different biological abilities—women can have babies, men cannot. Men have more
testosterone and are, in general, physically stronger than women. There are slightly
more women than men in the world—52 percent of the world’s population is female—
but most of the positions of power and prestige are occupied by men. The late Kenyan
Nobel peace laureate Wangari Maathai put it simply and well when she said, the higher
you go, the fewer women there are. “”””””

For me personally I believe that the inequality that women have faced through the centuries and today as well is a failure of all societies, and especially the mindset of male patriarchy.

As I went further your own contribution states that women should be see as having equal right with men in the society.

For me personally, I kick against the fact that women are weak and less important in the society. We are equal.

No body have the right to detect if a person is less or weak. Society has made it look like that. Even some of the women has accepted this fact that they are weak and less important. There by making them weaker vessels and there by making them not to have the equal right withe men.

Because of this it gave rise to gender equality that is been declared by feminist.

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“”””””” Teach her, too, to
question the idea of women as a special species. I once heard an American politician, in his
bid to show his support for women, speak of how women should be ‘revered’ and
‘championed’ – a sentiment that is all too common.
Tell Chizalum that women actually don’t need to be championed and revered; they just need
to be treated as equal human beings. There is a patronizing undertone to the idea of women
needing to be ‘championed and revered’ because they are women. It makes me think of
chivalry, and the premise of chivalry is female weakness.

“”””””

Quote from Patrick stories

1. I hate being subjected to particular assault or being grouped as “women and children” while there are lots of things that show that I have quality features to make me valuable as a strong individual, not being grouped as weak because I’m female. Maybe physically, intellectually, etc.

2. I was brought up by a mother who inculcated in me a deep respect for women. I believe that the inequality that women have faced through the centuries and today as well is a failure of all societies, and especially the mindset of male patriarchy. I cannot call myself anything other than a person who believes strongly in justice and gender-rights for women everywhere. It would be arrogant of me to call myself a feminist, though I believe strongly in the cause of the emancipation of women in all societies that repress women and pursue the same practices of male domination.

– Kogwuonye Patrick Onyeka

— GENDER ROLES AND STEREOTYPES—-

Gender roles have cause more harm than good in the society.

On these topics, here is a link about gender and stereotypes that I publish this year.

Here is what my own renowned feminist have to say about GENDER ROLES, GENDER and STEREOTYPE.

According to a popular literature book “”” we should all be feminist “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

1. Gender is not an easy conversation to have. It makes people uncomfortable, sometimes even irritable. Both men and women are resistant to talk about gender, or are quick to dismiss the problems of gender. Because thinking of changing the status quo is always uncomfortable.

2. The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.

3. I am trying to unlearn many lessons of gender I internalized while growing up. But I sometimes still feel vulnerable in the face of gender expectations.

4. What if, in raising children, we focus on ability instead of gender? What if we focus on interest instead of gender?

5. Gender matters everywhere in the world. And I would like today to ask that we begin to dream about and plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently.

6. Gender and class are different. Poor men still have the privileges of being men, even if they do not have the privileges of being wealthy.

Regarding Israel – it’ll be published tomorrow, in the anti-racist article:
“Feminism is a Jew plot” morons says – you sure?
It’s the third article of the salvo, and the first in English.
Fire will open at 2,00 AM with a dedication and a short movie of Soviet artillery firing, then 3 minutes after that it’ll appear the great article about maternal violence, and so on…

Yes, that’s the only possible outcome, since rapes of men are NOT recognized as rape…

It would be like it would be legal for men to kill women, but not legal for women to kill men: therefore men killing women wouldn’t be “murder” and therefore “it’s women murdering men, not men murdering women!”.

One of the strong points of my blog is:
I never tell lies, and I back every statement with proofs.
I don’t rely on personal opinions, nor on individual cases / anectodes.

The blog is mainly about laws, public policies.
Then studies: with at least 1,000 participants, preferably from academic sources.

I’m harsh and hyperbolic but I do not debord, that’s probably why the blog is followed by quite a lot of female poets.

The very few times I went off the rails it was always against traditionalists / religious zealots.
And it’s quite funny to see sometimes some feminists within the comments siding with me against those idiots.

In a traditional society:
The status of a man doesn’t change after marriage because the status of a man is determined by money.
The status of a woman does change after a marriage because the status of the woman is determined by the money.
How so?
Because in a traditional society men get money through work, women get money through marriage.
Therefore:
“Mr” = man with money
“Mrs” = woman with money
“Ms” = woman without money
There’s no “man without money” because that’s a dead man, since women do not support men. And dead people do not have titles.
Notice “r” = “money” and “s” = female.

Am sorry for the late response, my schedule was so tight. I saw your message this morning and I have to reply now.

I will agree with you in the first statement—

“”””””‘ In a traditional society:
1. The status of a man doesn’t change after marriage

2. The status of a woman does change after a marriage

“””””””
Am backing it up in terms of initials of a man or woman name with a quote from my own loved personal renowned FEMINIST Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi says in her book.

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

Here she says:

“”””””‘ Mrs’ is a title I dislike because Nigerian society gives it too much value. I have observed too many cases of men and women who proudly speak of the title of Mrs as though those who
are not Mrs have somehow failed at something. Mrs can be a choice, but to infuse it with as
much value as our culture does is disturbing. The value we give to Mrs means that marriage
changes the social status of a woman but not that of a man. (Is that perhaps why many women
complain of married men still ‘acting’ as though they were single? Perhaps if our society asked
married men to change their names and take on a new title, different from Mr, their behaviour
might change as well? Ha!) But more seriously, if you, a twenty-eight-year-old master’s degree
holder, go overnight frodo Ijeawele Eze to Mrs Ijeawele Udegbunam, surely it requires not just
the mental energy of changing passports and licences but also a psychic change, a new
‘becoming’? This new ‘becoming’ would not matter so much if men, too, had to undergo it.
I prefer Ms because it is similar to Mr. A man is Mr whether married or not, a woman is Ms
whether married or not. “””””

For the aspect of money determining the status of a man or a woman I don’t personally agree with that.

I feel personally this statement is fallacy-

“””””” Because in a traditional society men get money through work, women get money through marriage. “””””””

I will use use my favourite feminist who had her own money before getting married.

Renowned FEMINIST chimamanda Ngozi Adichie was popular and had her own money before she married.

She did not get popular through her marriage to the said doctor or fame through her marriage.

Anybody or any woman can get money without being married to any body.

Thank you. I am happy to see you raise this point about marriage. It gives me a thoughtful thinking and am happy for that.

Here is her own quote about marriage –

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

FEMINIST Adichie Chimanmanda Ngozi she says in her book:

“””” Never speak of marriage as an achievement. Find ways to make clear to her that marriage is not
an achievement, nor is it what she should aspire to. A marriage can be happy or unhappy, but it
is not an achievement. We condition girls to aspire to marriage and we do not condition boys to aspire to marriage,
and so there is already a terrible imbalance at the start. The girls will grow up to be women preoccupied with marriage. The boys will grow up to be men who are not preoccupied with marriage. The women marry those men. The relationship is automatically uneven because the institution matters more to one than the other. “”””””””

So the society as turned marriage as an achievement for women in term of same and money, which is not proper. Marriage should be a CHOICE thing not a MUST thing.

I guess that statement is not agreeable to me.

Sorry for saying that. That is my own opinion.

I want to correct this statement you made here–

Therefore:
“Mr” = man with money
“Mrs” = woman with money
“Ms” = woman without money
There’s no “man without money” because that’s a dead man, since women do not support men. And dead people do not have titles.
Notice “r” = “money” and “s” = female. “”””””

The last time I check Mr, Mrs,Miss and Ms are initials of someone name.

Initial are not used to determined someone fame or money. Anybody can have money or fame in the society.

My own and liked Renowned FEMINIST chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has initial Ms attached to her name . she has money. So what is the point saying that -“Ms” = woman without.

Using money to determined the status of women is totally wrong.

I have to back up what you said about status of a women in terms of money using My own and liked Renowned FEMINIST chimamanda Ngozi Adichie quote about money

She says:

1. To have money, it seemed, was to be consumed by money.

2. On Money and wealth
18. Creative writing programmes are not very necessary. They just exist so that people like us can make a living.

19. There are many different ways to be poor in the world but increasingly there seems to be one single way to be rich.

20. How can we resist exploitation if we don’t have the tools to understand exploitation.

Sidenote: a wonderful thing in speaking with someone in Nigeria is: same hour, or very similar. When it’s 2 PM here, then it’s 1 PM, 2 PM or 3 PM in Nigeria, the same or almost the same hour, even if we’re so distant.
It’s a mess when you speak with people from USA or China, since their hour is very different (-6/-8 hours in USA, +8 hours in China).

I wasn’t referring to Chimamanda Ngozi specifically, I was referring to women in general within a conservative society: women in general don’t earn money or earn less than men, so they get money mainly by marrying a man.
That’s why the status of a woman tend to change through marriage, while the status of a man tend not to change.

I personally observed that the status of a man tend to change when having kids, even more than the status of a woman.

In Nigeria you’re experimenting the first phase of feminism.
It’s all fair and nice at the beginning, but since it’s focused on women (“gynocentrism”: a narrative that takes in account just only women’s issues and women’s experiences) it’s outcomes in the long run are not going to be nice, nor fair.

Example: genital cutting.
It should be illegal, since babies cannot consent. Consent and personal choice is the key, the universal right, the HUMAN right. Both women and men are human and should be equal.
While the final outcome of gynocentrism / feminism in the west have been:
Parents are fully allowed to cut male babies, while powerful pressure groups are lobbying to criminalize genital piercing on adult females: a CHOICE that ADULT females freely have. Same for breast enlarging: another choice that some adult females have.
This is the result of gynocentrism in the long run.

Worth noticing that genital piercing and breast enlargement are offered in shops and beauty clinics, just only a minority of women choose to have it, and there’s to pay for it. It’s a commercial beauty practice, nothing more, a free choice of a minority of women.
While genital cutting of male babies is against their will, since babies cannot consent.
Still, cutting of male babies is legal, while there’s pressure to criminalize the free choice of adult women.

Off-topic:
I manage even such site:https://watchina.home.blog
It’s not going to be updated since readers are too few (while TIMI is going very well).
It’s in Italian, but as you already know I can speak English.

If a day you’ll need to buy a watch, my knowledge is at your service: the blog was focused on high-quality / low-price wristwatches, mostly made in China. So I guess it’s the best for someone who have to buy a good wristwatch on a Nigerian budget.
My suggestions aren’t commercially motivated: a commercially motivated suggestion would suggest a specifical brand, not a dozen of competing different brands.

As a wristwatch collectionist, I have the pleasure to own both famous brands (Bulova, Casio, Omega, Seiko, Tissot) and alternative cheaper Chinese brands, so I know which of those Chinese brands can roughly compare to the famous brands (while being much cheaper) and which of those Chinese brands are actually crap. Most of the Chinese brands are crap, but a relevant minority are good products.

I don’t sell watches, I don’t have connections with watch sellers.
I just review them, well, I reviewed them, not anymore since people doesn’t seem interested.
The blog wasn’t about very expensive watches like an Audemars Piguet Royal Oak: it’s about quartz watches under 50 euro, and automatic watches under 150 euro.
Example:
This isn’t produced anymore, the look is incredible, and the quality of such specifical brand is more or less on pair with a Casio. But it costed just only 20 euro – about 25 American dollars.

I have an huge collection of watches like that, plus more than 30 famous watches, including two Omega Megasonic, Vostok Amphibia, Tissot PR100, Bulova Precisionist, etcetera.

I’m preparing dinner for my son and my daughter, here it’s 6,29 PM, in winter the dinner is around 7 PM, in summer it’s around 8 PM.

Yes, I’m only on wordpress.

Amnd I have quite a lot of free time during winter saturdays: my boat is not at sea anymore, I don’t work on saturday, and I go out mostly at night since weather sucks and there’s nothing to do during daytime.

Sorry for the late response. Like I said before my schedule is tight this period.

Thanks for understanding my plight about this.

Genital piercing and breast enlargement is a commercial beauty practice, nothing more, a free choice of a minority of women.

That is true.

I support this statement with passion —

“””‘ While genital cutting of male babies is against their will, since babies cannot consent. Still, cutting of male babies is legal, while there’s pressure to criminalize the free choice of adult women. “”””

I feel some because of the patriarchal society we found ourselves.

Males cutting legal while females cutting illegal

Here are some quotes about genital cutting to back up or support what you are saying-

1. “And yet, despite repeated assurances that women aren’t particularly sexual creatures, in cultures around the world men have gone to extraordinary lengths to control female libido: female genital mutilation, head-to-toe chadors, medieval witch burnings, chastity belts, suffocating corsets, muttered insults about “insatiable” whores, pathologizing, paternalistic medical diagnoses of nymphomania or hysteria, the debilitating scorn heaped on any female who chooses to be generous with her sexuality…all parts of a worldwide campaign to keep the supposedly low-key female libido under control. Why the electrified high-security razor-wire fence to contain a kitty-cat?”
Author: Christopher Ryan

5. Why are so many Americans for male circumcision but against female circumcision? Both are equally cruel and barbaric traditions.

Oliver Markus Malloy, Inside The Mind of an Introvert

6. These tribal wars, like the practice of circumcision, are brought about by the ego, selfishness, and aggression of men. I hate to say that, but it’s true. Both acts stem from their obsession with their territory—their possessions—and women fall into that category both culturally and legally. Perhaps if we cut their balls off, my country would become paradise. The men would calm down and be more sensitive to the world. Without that constant surge of testosterone, there’d be no war, no killing, no thieving, no rape. And if we chopped off their private parts, and turned them loose to run around and either bleed to death or survive, maybe they could understand for the first time what they’re doing to their women.

SIDE NOTE :
Time difference — a wonderful thing in speaking with someone in Nigeria is: same hour, or very similar. When it’s 2 PM here, then it’s 1 PM, 2 PM or 3 PM in Nigeria, the same or almost the same hour, even if we’re so distant.

It’s a mess when you speak with people from USA or China, since their hour is very different (-6/-8 hours in USA, +8 hours in China).

From your comment/ reply , am able to bring out 3 statement that you made right now.

1. women in general don’t earn money or earn less than men, so they get money mainly by marrying a man. That’s why the status of a woman tend to change through marriage, while the status of a man tend not to change.

2. I personally observed that the status of a man tend to change when having kids, even more than the status of a woman.

3. (“gynocentrism”: a narrative that takes in account just only women’s issues and women’s experiences)

Example: genital cutting.

It should be illegal, since babies cannot consent. Consent and personal choice is the key, the universal right, the HUMAN right. Both women and men are human and should be equal.

“”””” women in general don’t earn money or earn less than men, so they get money mainly by marrying a man. That’s why the status of a woman tend to change through marriage, while the status of a man tend not to change. “”””””

I know you referring to women in general. I just have to site example to back up it up about the initial Ms.

I don’t still agree with the statement below personally.

Let me quote- “”””””I was referring to women in general within a conservative society: women in general don’t earn money or earn less than men, so they get money mainly by marrying a man. That’s why the status of a woman tend to change through marriage, while the status of a man tend not to change. “”””””””

Am a freethinker and my opinions are my personal decisions. I don’t Concord with society norms and tradition. Don’t mind me am not supporting you on this. That is PATRICK STORIES for you.

STATEMENT 2 –

This statement—

“””””” I personally observed that the status of a man tend to change when having kids, even more than the status of a woman. “”””””

I just need examples to prove such statement about the change of man status after having kids.

Sorry for asking. We are discussing.

STATEMENT 3-

(“gynocentrism”: a narrative that takes in account just only women’s issues and women’s experiences)

Example: genital cutting.

My own views-

Genital cutting is mostly done on the boys.

The WHO have kick against such thing against girl and women. But for now it’s still done on the males.
Its legal for male and illegal for women.

I support STATEMENT 3. What you said are true.

“””””” It should be illegal, since babies cannot consent. Consent and personal choice is the key, the universal right, the HUMAN right. Both women and men are human and should be equal. “”””””

Thanks for sharing such an information. I just learned a new word now “””” GYNOCENTRISM “”””.

Thank you. I am happy to see your answer on the questions I asked you. Thanks so much for the time taken to do that. PATRICK STORIES appreciate the very much.

You welcome Ms TIMI

Cheers,

From PATRICK

#PATRICKSTORIES
Peace ✌and Love ❤

NOTE: “”” Ms “””” was attached here to your name because I believe you are a feminist and you run a feminist blog and also the way the popular FEMINIST Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi says in her book:

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

Here she says:

“”””””‘ Mrs’ is a title I dislike because Nigerian society gives it too much value. I have observed too many cases of men and women who proudly speak of the title of Mrs as though those who
are not Mrs have somehow failed at something. Mrs can be a choice, but to infuse it with as
much value as our culture does is disturbing. The value we give to Mrs means that marriage
changes the social status of a woman but not that of a man. (Is that perhaps why many women
complain of married men still ‘acting’ as though they were single? Perhaps if our society asked
married men to change their names and take on a new title, different from Mr, their behaviour
might change as well? Ha!) But more seriously, if you, a twenty-eight-year-old master’s degree
holder, go overnight frodo Ijeawele Eze to Mrs Ijeawele Udegbunam, surely it requires not just
the mental energy of changing passports and licences but also a psychic change, a new
‘becoming’? This new ‘becoming’ would not matter so much if men, too, had to undergo it.
I prefer Ms because it is similar to Mr. A man is Mr whether married or not, a woman is Ms
whether married or not.

That is a good way of showing he is really sorry for why he did. I love that attitude.

You are welcome Ms TIMI

Thanks for that

You are welcome

#PATRICKSTORIES
Peace ✌and Love ❤

NOTE: “”” Ms “””” was attached here to your name because I believe you are a feminist and you run a feminist blog and also the way the popular FEMINIST Adichie Chimamanda Ngozi says in her book:

According to a popular literature book “””. Dear ijeawele or a feminist manifesto in fifteen suggestions “””

Here she says:

“”””””‘ Mrs’ is a title I dislike because Nigerian society gives it too much value. I have observed too many cases of men and women who proudly speak of the title of Mrs as though those who
are not Mrs have somehow failed at something. Mrs can be a choice, but to infuse it with as
much value as our culture does is disturbing. The value we give to Mrs means that marriage
changes the social status of a woman but not that of a man. (Is that perhaps why many women
complain of married men still ‘acting’ as though they were single? Perhaps if our society asked
married men to change their names and take on a new title, different from Mr, their behaviour
might change as well? Ha!) But more seriously, if you, a twenty-eight-year-old master’s degree
holder, go overnight frodo Ijeawele Eze to Mrs Ijeawele Udegbunam, surely it requires not just
the mental energy of changing passports and licences but also a psychic change, a new
‘becoming’? This new ‘becoming’ would not matter so much if men, too, had to undergo it.
I prefer Ms because it is similar to Mr. A man is Mr whether married or not, a woman is Ms
whether married or not.

He did nothing wrong, he was falsely accused and that was proved within a court.

In my country there’s a bizarre law about stalking: everone can maliciously take advantage of it.
Two typical examples:
A man was charged with stalking because he used the parking of another man. That’s abusive use of other people’s parking, it is violation of private property, it’s not stalking.
Another example is: a man has a debt, the debt collection agency calls him home multiple times, he sues the agency for stalking so he does not pay the debt, the debt collection agency also risks serious troubles.

Thanks for letting me know about such laws. I have watch such a movie about stalking where the girl sue her Ex guy for stalking at her.

In Nigeria such don’t exist at all. Our government don’t put such law in to practise.

This second example made me laugh—-

“”””” A man has a debt, the debt collection agency calls him home multiple times, he sues the agency for stalking so he does not pay the debt, the debt collection agency also risks serious troubles. “”””””

The guy so intelligent that he has to sue them for such.

You can’t try that in Nigeria. We don’t have much laws on stalking.

Thanks for giving me such information. Am happy I knew such happens in USA.

I have been at a dinner with old school classmates three weeks ago: we were at school together when we were 11-14, now more than 30 years have passed.

At the dinner there were, among others, a woman and a man:

The woman have been actually stalked for 6 whole years. No justice for her. She didn’t report the stalker to the police, since he was annoying but not dangerous – multiple phone calls, nothing more. Still, it’s a lot of stress.

The man have been falsely accused by his former wife to get his money, then she withdrawn the accusation when he paid a lot of money to her.