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Max Johns Seen Walking Across Robertson Lake

On a run Monday afternoon, several members of the cross country team witnessed a peculiar incident on Robertson Lake. It was Max Johns, our senior prefect, taking a stroll across the water. “We were on a run in that area and saw him casually walking on the water,” said one of the witnesses. “It was like he was just using the water as a shortcut. I think he was also doing his English homework.” Quite the story. This would be in line with other reports of Max, which include curing cancer with his tears and summoning fire from his fingertips. “I’m not surprised at all,” said another witness.