Whoa: John Krasinski and Emily Blunt will be heading down the aisle in "about a month"!

A source says the couple picked up their wedding bands on Monday. Emily will either wear Monique Lhuillier or Vera Wang, and the event will be a "big wedding," either in London or Los Angeles. Um, who is the "source" that doesn't know which continent they'll tie the knot on? [E!]

After canceling some shows due to illness, Whitney Houston returned to the stage in Birmingham, UK last night. Critics were unimpressed: The Sun blared, "Houston, we still have a problem"; a reporter for the BBC wrote that "'I Will Always Love You' will live long in the memory, and not for the right reasons." Apparently Whitney was short of breath and took lots of breaks — one which lasted for 15 minutes — and some audience members booed. [Reuters]

A new day, a new revelation from Kitty Kelley's unauthorized biography of Oprah: Apparently Oprah is afraid of being assassinated, so her studio is "a fortress" and she always keeps security super tight. [Radar Online]

Oprah is having tons of events and a huge three-day celebration called "Live Your Best Life Weekend" to commemorate the 10th anniversary of her magazine — all of which divert attention from the Kitty Kelley book. [NY Post]

Inspired casting: Rachel Weisz will play Jacqueline Onassis in a film directed by her fiance, Darren Aronofsky. [The Wrap]

Avril Lavigne has "finally met her match" in Brody Jenner, because they both love doing shots. [Page Six]

The Today show's concert series has some excellent artists this year: Mark your calendars for June 8 (Christina Aguilera) and July 9 (Lady Gaga). Oh, and June 4 is Justin Bieber and July 23 is John Mayer, in case you want to know when to avoid the show. [NY Post]

Justin Bieber and his hair got a driver's license. Does the DMV allow you have that much bang swish in your pic? [TMZ]

Some random cosmetic treatment website is announcing that Gerard Butler is the celebrity women who took their survey find most attractive. He beat out Brad Pitt and George Clooney. [Mirror]

Aw: Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe helped each other through break-ups. Ryan says: "It's gotten to a place where we're great friends and great co-parents." [Mirror]

Today in TMI: Matthew Fox lost his virginity at age 12. The girl in question "was about two years older than me. It wasn't her first time." Lest you believe that there was romance involved, Foxy Fox clarifies: "It happened literally on the ground by a river while a rodeo was going on in town. It was absolutely terrible and awkward—just two fucking kids lying down and pulling our pants down." [Us Magazine]

Jim Carrey knows that he's been criticized for his Twitter comments about Tiger Woods, and says: "To anyone whose grievances have chosen me as their cause, I would say first, that I recognize that tendency in myself, but if you knew me well, you'd see that your resentment has been misplaced." And: "I wish every human being nothing but love and immeasurable happiness. Now, I'm going to re-enter the Twitter stream and see if there is anyone left to offend!" [Radar Online]

Nadya "Octomom" Suleman will appear on Oprah next week and discuss how she is raising her 14 kids. She will also be in a skit on the American Idol charity show, Idol Gives Back, which makes less sense. [AP]

Uh-oh. The ladies of Desperate Housewives have made it clear that they are on Marc Cherry's side when it comes to Nicollette Sheridan's lawsuit: Eva Longoria Parker, Teri Hatcher, Marcia Cross and Felicity Huffman issued a joint statement yesterday, which reads, in part, "It would be irresponsible of us to let the public believe that being a part of this show from its inception has been anything but a blessing. The friendships and support that Marc Cherry, the cast, the crew and the producers have shared for the past six years have made this a wonderful job that we are grateful for every day." [People]

This should be interesting: Russell Brand is cutting his hair. Mostly because he's starring in a remake of Arthur. But also, he says, "If I'm going to pursue a career in films I can't always play Rasputin." [The Sun]

No snark here: Tina Knowles sounds like a great mom. She says she has a close relationship with both of her daughters, and had a close relationship with her mother. She claims: "I have always tried to be as open and honest as possible with the girls growing up. I let them know they could always come to me with anything — and I would be there to support them." Her advice? "First, realize that children don't come with an instruction book," she says. "Trust me: You will make mistakes, and the important thing is to admit that you are human and not perfect and [to not] take it personally." [MomLogic]

Bret Michaels is still in the hospital following his appendectomy — he had a fever, which could be a sign of infection. Be well! [People]

Charlie Sheen's lawyers are trying to block incriminating evidence from his criminal trial, claiming that cops failed to read him his Miranda rights. [TMZ]

Elin Nordegren is having her newly purchased house in Sweden renovated. Will she move there? [TMZ]

No legal papers have been filed, but it seems that divorce is eminent for Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren. [People]

Apparently in a 2004 radio interview, Simon Cowell said he had a problem with kids on talent shows; now Britain's Got Talent includes child contestants. [Mirror]

Click for a gorgeous image and video of Tilda Swinton. [Dazed Digital]

And! The Tilda Swinton cover of Dazed And Confused, if you haven't seen it. [Dazed Digital]

Oh, Ke$ha. I'm pretty sure you weren't JFK in your past life. Just like I'm fairly sure that, for some reason, these arty pictures from Interview would be cooler with someone else in them. [JustJared]

Dr. Conrad Murray is prohibited from administering prescription drugs in Texas, California, and, soon, most likely, Nevada. Will he be able to work while awaiting trial? And therefore make money to pay his lawyers? [TMZ]

George Lopez is excited about Conan O'Brien coming to TBS; he calls their partnership "Team LoCo." Lopez called O'Brien to assure him that he had no problem with his show being pushed to midnight: "What he was concerned with was that he wasn't going to do to me what was done to him at NBC," Lopez says. "He did not want me to get 'Leno'd.'" [CNN]

A concert promoting company has a court order against Prince for canceling a Dublin show; in statement, a spokesperson from the company said, "How could you just leave me standing? Alone in a world that's so cold." [Irish Times]

The lady who is accusing Steven Seagal of treating her like a sex servant was once on The Tyra Banks Show, where she claimed to be a lipstick lesbian who can "trick men." [TMZ]

Randy and Evi Quaid failed to show up in court for a second day in a row; now there is a bench warrant for their arrest. [Radar Online]

Just what you always wanted: Chris Brown talking about the Census. [TMZ]

What? Angelina, the chick who walked out of the first season, is on the second season of Jersey Shore? Weird. Apparently the other castmembers "literally despise her" and "feel they did all the work." [Radar Online]

Joss Whedon is finalizing negotiations to direct a movie based on Marvel comics' The Avengers — that's the team made up of Hulk, Captain America, Iron Man and Thor. [Reuters]

Coming soon: A Broadway musical called The Book Of Mormon, from South Park's Trey Parker and Matt Stone — and Robert Lopez of Avenue Q. [NY Post]

I'll be blunt: You'd have to pay me a heap of money to be in the room when the 19 Duggar kids met the 17 Bates kids. Too scary. [Radar Online]

Warren Beatty to 81-year-old Arlene Dahl (mother of Lorenzo Lamas): "You are the most beautiful woman to have ever graced the stage." Arlene, in a whisper to her husband: "Amazing compliment, considering I am the only star he didn't sleep with!" [Page Six]

Q: Do you think The Hills should be ending?Whitney Port: "I don't know if it should be ending. I think it's ending on a strong note. I think that they're going out with the popularity still being really high. It's bittersweet for me. I remind myself still that I was once on it. It seems so far away from now. The show was so different when I was a part of it. I think that when Lauren [Conrad] left, a lot of the authenticity and spark of the show kind of went with her." [E!]

"I'm having a really bad day. I had a root canal and took a few too many Vicodin. But I've decided I never want to do anything without Vicodin anymore. If I can recommend anything to you tonight, it's to go out and get hurt so you can get some of this stuff." — Darrell Hammond, who unexpectedly took the stage at amateur night at comedy club Caroline's. [Gatecrasher]

"I loved the idea of doing something that was purely creative, weird and wonderful and not a commercial venture." — Keira Knightley on starring in a short film directed by English painter Stuart Pearson Wright, which was made for £15,000, filmed in one day, and for which Keira was not paid. [Independent]

"I have the greatest hair ever. It's thick, it's naturally straight and I can pretty much do whatever I want to it. My hair can have its own TV show. It's real, there's no extensions, sweeties. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful." — Snooki, in some kind of promo for a contest for Pantene. [People]