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Watchinghorror movies in a third class movie house, walking along bare foot in a stony beach, strolling in a flowerless park, playing with faceless paper dolls, eating meatless meat lover's pizza, learning how to play an old bamboo flute, climbing an ant infested mango tree, flying a kite made of sticks and Japanese paper, and staring at the stars on a breeze less summer night would be a lot more enjoyable when done with a friend or to be more specific about it - a bestfriend! I'm sure a great number of people will agree with me if I say that things are absolutely better when done with a bestfriend!

Elsa Ragoza, the Simple Schoolgirl - despite being bald and seemingly different from other schoolgirls her age - also has a bestfriend! Or should I say - HAD a bestfriend! Now you must remember that HAS and HAD are two different words! While both words are verbs and may infact be used with a singular noun, it still plays a great role in making a point clear! HAS is used to indicate an action or state of being in the present tense, while HAD is used in the opposite- The PAST tense! In other words - Elsa used to have a bestfriend!

Before I go on further explaining why Elsa now only USED to have a Bestfriend, it would be a matter of great importance - specially to the Grown-Ups - that I define this episode's title: The Breathless Bestfriend! As perhaps already known to many, Bestfriend is a compound noun which is normally spelled separately! Bestfriend is made up of two words - Best and Friend. Best is a word which means: " In the highest degree or beyond all others. " While Friend means: " A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts. " In other words, A Bestfriend is: " A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts in the highest degree or beyond all others! " Now the word: Breathless may also be broken down into two separate words. Breath and Less. Breath is actually a noun which means: " The air inhaled and exhaled in respiration. " While Less is a suffix which is used to form adjectives meaning: without (the thing mentioned). In other words, Breathless means: DEAD! Elsa Ragoza's bestfriend is already DEAD!

Now please pardon me if I had to say that there is really nothing much to tell about Elsa's bestfriend. As a matter of fact, her being DEAD means that she will not be playing a very major role in my actual narration of Elsa's grievously sad story! So if you expect to read an episode - after this one - where the Breathless Bestfriend would suddenly defend Elsa from those who inflicts her pain, then that - definitely - won't happen. This is no longer possible for the simple reason that: the Breathless Bestfriend, as I have already mentioned, is DEAD!

Here and now I must say that it is also very important that I tell you that the Breathless Bestfriend, despite being DEAD - and just like all other Bestfriends whether living or dead - has a name. It should also follow that I tell you the name of the Breathless Bestfriend. Being DEAD does not strip one of the right to be known or to be introduced. Being DEAD does not erase the good - or even the bad - things that one has done in the past. Anyway, the name of the Breathless Bestfriend of the Simple Schoolgirl is: Ivy Violinda Ubesa.

Ivy Violinda Ubesa was actually Elsa's Bestfriend when both girls were just at an age when one - aside from enjoying the activities that I mentioned at the beginning of this episode - still believes that they could become Princesses with an elegant violet colored gown and a sparkling diamond studded tiara! The Breathless Bestfriend unfortunately did not live long enough to learn that not all girls grow up to become a Princess! Ivy Violinda Ubesa died at a very young age!

Ivy Violinda Ubesa - if mentioning it would make any sense at all - was the second person next to Icasiano Antonio who truly, genuinely, and honestly loved Elsa. Ivy Violinda Ubesa being DEAD is enough proof that she truly did loved Elsa. And to further prove my claim I also must tell you that when Ivy Violinda Ubesa was still alive, she took it to herself to serve as Elsa's defender. Ivy Violinda Ubesa made sure that she defends Elsa from other mean girls. Ivy Violeta Ubesa also made sure that Elsa was always happy. Ivy Violinda Ubesa always tries to cheer up Elsa specially when she sees Elsa looking sad. Ivy Violinda Ubesa's presence made Elsa Ragoza The Simple Schoolgirl not very different from other young girls! And so, despite being physically, psychologically, and mentally maltreated by her own mother - on a daily basis - Elsa still had reasons to be happy because she had her bestfriend to cheer her up. And despite being bullied by other girls - on a regular basis - Elsa still had reasons to be strong because she had her bestfriend to defend her!

Now I have to tell you that the Breathless Bestfriend was not any richer than Elsa, infact she herself had a very sorry life. Ivy Violinda Ubesa had to vend pandesal just like Elsa. Ivy Violinda Ubesa had to harvest Indian Mangoes from an ant infested mango tree as a part time job! Ivy Violinda Ubesa was infact - also a subject of ridicule by other girls because she does not have any nice clothes to wear. Ivy Violinda Ubesa is Elsa's neighbor in Baseco Compound. She lives in a shanty made of scrap woods and galvanized iron with her mother and 10 other siblings. Food was not enough for all of them. Her father left them for another woman. And she has dark skin and she is devoted to the color Violet! But despite all her miseries, Ivy Violinda Ubesa still manages to smile everyday and see the beauty behind all the misery. Ivy Violinda Ubesa always seem to have every reasons to be happy. Ivy Violeta Ubesa is a very positive person! This attitude is what actually drew Elsa to her. And it is the very same attitude that Elsa herself grew to learn. Now I have to reveal that it is actually Ivy Violinda Ubesa who inspired Elsa how to be Optimistic!

There is another thing that I need to tell you about Ivy Violinda Ubesa apart from her being DEAD and apart from her being the Breathless Bestfriend who defended Elsa from bullies, who cheers up Elsa, and who inspired Elsa how to be optimistic. I must make sure I don't miss out telling you this very important detail as this may allow you to understand Elsa better as you continue on reading about Elsa's string of agonies!

At this point I wish to tell you that Ivy Violinda Ubesa would appear before Elsa everytime the Simple Schoolgirl is in trouble, is sad, or is hurt. Ivy Violinda Ubesa appears before Elsa as a spirit and tells her that things will be fine. Nobody except Elsa would see and hear Ivy Violinda of course. Ivy Violinda Ubesa appeared to Elsa when the Terrible teacher was punishing her! Ivy Violinda Ubesa appeared to Elsa when the Beastly Boss was making her life miserable! Ivy Violinda Ubesa appeared to Elsa everytime Fanchita Isidra makes her do impossible things like singing backwards! Ivy Violinda Ubesa appeared to Elsa while she was walking around the campus while holding the placard saying: " I am a cheater! Do not imitate me! " Ivy Violinda Ubesa appeared to Elsa while the Simple Schoolgirl was doing her task as a Canteen Assistant.

Ivy Violinda Ubesa appears to Elsa to tell her and assure her that things will be fine! Sometimes, Ivy Violinda Ubesa visits Elsa in her dreams or while Elsa is resting. Ivy Violinda Ubesa, even in afterlife has remained a real friend to Elsa. A friend who tells another friend that things will be fine. A friend who would defend another friend in trouble. A friend who supports another friend in all her undertakings. A friend who makes sure that her friend has a friend when the friend needs a friend.

In the first sentence of the 4th paragraph of this episode, I wrote that there is really nothing much to tell about Ivy Violinda Ubesa, The Breathless Bestfriend of The Simple Schoolgirl. But I guess - after saying what I said above - I managed to somehow introduce her to you anyway. It is important that you know who Ivy Violinda Ubesa is! Even is she would not be playing a very big role in my actual narration of Elsa's story! Knowing who the Breathless Bestriend is, would allow you to understand Elsa better. I have to say that, this episode did not actually narrate a story! The truth of the matter is: I added this episode with the primary purpose of making you understand Elsa a lot more.

By the way, Ivy Violinda Ubesa The Breathless Bestfriend - mysterious, impossible, and intriguing as it may seem- died of an ant bite!

"A Bestfriend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out." - Grace Pulpit

The Sepulchral Storyteller

Adnos Uyañe Plein was born on Marcius Mensis on the atomic number of Chronium in the Pearl of the Orient Seas that has Seven Thousand One Hundred Seven Islands. Adnos use to have a Mother and a Father until some regretful circumstances took both away. Adnos has a collection of feathered little blue notebooks. Adnos always speaks the cruel truth. Adnos looks at grownups and see the child that dwells in each. Adnos listens to the grownups speak and hears the child in them whimper.

The Lousy Letter

Dear Readers,

It is my sad duty to inform you that this story is filled with sad, miserable and unpleasant events in the life of a young girl named Elsa! In this page you will also read about children going to bed hungry, love evaded women, truth clouded with doubts, stormy weather, deadly ant bites, wet socks, old green jackets and crumpled paper.

If you feel that you are not ready to read such kind of story because you believe that the world is too perfect and life is so good to spend and waste time reading about how dejected other people's lives are, then you may leave now. I would understand. But if you derive contentment out of knowing that there are other people out there whose life is more deplorable than yours, then stay. Read along! React!

But again, I warn you! Reading this story may not be a very pleasant experience! Believe me.

On this page I wont be talking about weekend picnics, chicken noodle soup, red roses, hot coffee, teddy bears and happy ending! I have not heard and so I could not share any real life Fairy tale. All that I know and all that I could share is Elsa's sad story. Thus the title of this narrative: The agony of Elsa (an allegoric chronicle of a regrettable affair)!

The Nasty News

The Pinpointed Person

Daniel Handler is an author, screenwriter and accordionist. He is best known for his work under the pen name Lemony Snicket. Handler was born in San Francisco, California. He attended Commodore Sloat Elementary, Herbert Hoover Middle School and Lowell High School. Handler graduated from Wesleyan University in 1992.He is an alumnus of the San Francisco Boys Chorus. Handler is married to Lisa Brown, a graphic artist that he met in college.They have a son, Otto, who was born around Halloween 2003. They live in an old Victorian house in San Francisco. Handler's mother is retired City College of San Francisco Dean, Sandra Handler, and his father, Louis Handler, is an accountant. He also has a younger sister, Rebecca Handler. Handler is politically active and helped form LitPAC. In the June 10, 2007 edition of The New York Times Magazine, Handler reveals ambivalence toward his wealth, and the expectations it creates. He states he is often asked for money for charitable causes and often gives. In an interview conducted by the 667 Dark Avenue fan site, Daniel Handler gave his personal philosophy as "Never refuse a breath mint". Although Handler has a Jewish background and considers C. S. Lewis to be an influence,he describes himself as a secular humanist.In addition, he says "I'm not a believer in predetermined fates, being rewarded for one's efforts. I'm not a believer in karma. The reason why I try to be a good person is because I think it's the right thing to do. If I commit fewer bad acts there will be fewer bad acts, maybe other people will join in committing fewer bad acts, and in time there will be fewer and fewer of them".

The Multifarious Miscellaneous

The Pathetic Poll

The Pensive Prayer

Dear Lord and my God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit I believe that You are dwelling in spirit in the deepest center of my soul. I adore you, I love you and I trust in you; for you are the source of my being and my life in all that I think, and say and do. Help me to see you in the hearts of others and to see the reflection of You in everything that You have made. Help me also to understand the things that I cannot change. May your name be praised, blessed and glorified forevermore. Amen.