Mortal Kombat Makes The Grig Its Bitch

If the common cold was as blatant in its viral marketing intentions as this video, it’d stop you in the street, screeching loudly in a camp wail that it wants to be “in” you, before dry-humping your quivering carcass to the ground with fevered shouts of “we want cold! we want rhinovirus!” until you submitted and lay still, curled into a pathetic, abused foetus and whinnying pitifully as you became its “bitch”.

Which, frankly, would have been more in keeping with Mortal Kombat‘s style.

Putting your game’s logo on a board, and getting some hobo-looking guy to hold it in the street is, by contrast, pretty much the most basic kind of marketing known to man, and hasn’t looked fresh since Pete, from Pete’s Pies, used the same tactic to advertise his meat-filled pastries in the tawdry streets of 18th century Workingsop. I mean, these guys don’t even use their spinning boards to slice anyone’s head off – and not once do they use the sharp ends to impale each other’s spine with blood-curdling cries of “finish him!”

But all of that said, it’s still always good to see people randomly spinning things. So, if you’re after viral, here’s the grigorig walking up to MK9, whispering “see you on April 21st” in its grotesque-looking ear, and then giving it a big lick on its stupid, pimply face.