Although she was not selected from the audience to "come on down," a green screen simulates what it would have looked like if reporter Meredith May made it onto the Price Is Right game show.

Although she was not selected from the audience to "come on down," a green screen simulates what it would have looked like if reporter Meredith May made it onto the Price Is Right game show.

Photo: Courtesy, Price Is Right/CBS

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Reporter Meredith May and Ted Ott, who gives nightly seminars on Price Is Right game show strategy at the Farmer's Daughter hotel in Los Angeles.

Reporter Meredith May and Ted Ott, who gives nightly seminars on Price Is Right game show strategy at the Farmer's Daughter hotel in Los Angeles.

Photo: Meredith May

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Winners of the Price Is Right game show are enshrined, along with former host Bob Barker, in the lobby of the Farmer's Daughter hotel in Los Angeles.

Winners of the Price Is Right game show are enshrined, along with former host Bob Barker, in the lobby of the Farmer's Daughter hotel in Los Angeles.

Photo: Courtesy, Meredith May

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When 'The Price Is Right' but the persona isn't

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It's 4:30 a.m., and I'm standing on Beverly Boulevard in a long line of desperados waiting for their luck to change.

Spot No. 1 is occupied by a guy snoring inside a sleeping bag, who arrived from Ohio two hours ago. Behind me, three recent high school graduates who found babysitters for their newborns are doing football cheers to stay warm.

Then there's Jared, a somewhat-employed landscaper who gambled his way from El Paso, Texas, to afford train and taxi fare. He smells of bourbon.

There are nearly 100 of us, each with our own secret reasons for skipping sleep, hoping to make it onto America's longest-running game show, which has been beckoning us for 38 years:

The fantasy of something for nothing still held me, after years of watching the show as a kid in the 1970s. Back then I thought my Salvation Army shopping sprees would come to an end if only Mom would win the showcase showdown and take home fabulous prizes.

Test of endurance

There are only 325 seats in the CBS Bob Barker Studio, and to get one you must be prepared for an all-day endurance test, which begins with the predawn wait outside the studio. At 6 a.m., "Price Is Right" pages open the gates to hand out numbered tickets. The lower the number, the better your chances of getting in the audience.

I get No. 150, giving me 50-50 odds. We are all told to go get some sleep and return at 1 p.m. for step two: a four-hour wait during which co-producer and contestant chooser Stan Blits will talk to each of us for 15 seconds. What we say will determine whether we get on the show.

Back at the Farmer's Daughter Hotel across the street, I went over what night desk clerk Ted Ott told me to increase my chances of getting onstage. Only nine names will be called. Six will actually get to play.

Ott has been giving free "Price Is Right" seminars since 2001. The only thing he asks in return is for winners to face his Polaroid, so he can add their photo to his "Price Is Right" shrine in the lobby.

Ott's tips: Look like Middle America. Don't rip your yellow name tag. Be fun, interesting and engaging during your interview, but don't lie and say you drive the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. If you have a military uniform, wear it.

"So what do you do when you aren't working?" Blits asked me when my turn finally came.

I smiled big, summoned a confident voice and told him I weld metal sculptures and race with a rowing team.

"Wow. You win a lot?"

"All the time!" I said, revealing my calluses.

I thought it went pretty well. At least better than the high school student next to the bike messenger, who when asked what he was studying, answered:

"Uh ... G.E.D?"

Stepping back in time

Once inside, I was transported back to 1978, during my formative "Price Is Right" years. Every summer morning found me in front of the television, memorizing games such as Plinko, Secret X and Switcheroo so I could tell my mother how to play.

The curtains with the sparkly pastel flowers were the same, the games hadn't changed, the flashing lights and theme music were deliciously stuck in the '70s. The models waved their fingers in front of camcorders and winked with delight just as they always did. The only difference was that host Bob Barker is gone, replaced by comic Drew Carey.

Production assistants jumped up and down onstage waving their arms, signaling us to scream and clap.

Lipstick on the cheek

First up onstage was a grandmother, who guessed wrong on the cost of a week at baseball camp. Then Mary, a college student from Fresno with dreams of designing lingerie, won a PT Cruiser by rolling five fuzzy dice correctly.

The crowd roared, and she left a bright red lipstick print on Carey's cheek, which required a corrective visit from the makeup people during a commercial.

The last name called was Christopher, who incorrectly guessed the price of a Harley-Davidson with orange flames on the tank. But he redeemed himself in the final showcase showdown against Mary, winning a trip to Chile, an outdoor movie theater and a barbecue grill.

Naturally quirky

It was all over in a Hollywood minute. Backstage, I found Blits, the Oz of "The Price Is Right," who graciously granted an interview.

First question: "Why didn't you pick me?"

He laughed. "You're too cool."

"Nice save," I said. I'm sure it's his stock answer for the passed-over.

But after 31 years, Blits knows what he wants: someone who will provide a "YouTube moment," someone who's a little loud, open to comedy, excited, who knows the show yet isn't a superfan. All the rumors about wearing bright colors and T-shirts with funny sayings and being from out of state don't do anything to increase your chances, he said.

"Seriously, I don't even look below the neck," he said. "I'm looking for naturally quirky. It's harder to find than you might think."