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i have now had three messages (two by PM and one posted on my profile) expressing shock about the fact that I sexually identify as an attack helicopter. I've also had one person who thought it would be helpful to tell me what the Koran thinks about it. Another promised some kind of "terrifying reaction". So, just to set the record straight, left, down, right, up, and backwards (pun intended):

Yes I do identify as an attack helicopter

No I don't care what you think about that (Even though I made a post about it which makes me a HUGE attention whore)

I follow the Church of the Flying Spaghetti monster, but if you don't I respect that. Please do me the same courtesy and show me the same Spagehtii! I do for you.

I am aware that most religious texts condemn Attack Helicopters. Reminding me of this will have absolutely no effect other than to offend me, so it's really not worth your time (unless offending me was your intention, in which case go ahead).

Me being An Attack Helicopter has no effect whatsoever on you. You don't need to worry about it, honest. If you're that concerned that a stranger on the internet is An Attack Helicopter, I don't see how you can cope with the many, many Attack Helicopters all around you in the real world. Seriously, we're everywhere.

There you have it. There should now be no reason for any more "omg ur An attack helicopter??!" messages. Feel free to send them anyway, but know that you'll just go straight on my High Value Target list of you do.