The Woodford Reserve Rye

750 ml fun with calculus bottle

Tasting notes: At first blush, this has a very pretty nose. But it’s set in a rather rugged face. I get the smell of a silk negligée still warm from the flushing skin it concealed—barely—only seconds before. But now it’s draped atop a Gerstner tool chest with 17 drawers, each drawer containing manly accoutrements. Then there are delicate African violet petals, but after they were given too many drugs and told a string of lies from Stephanie. And yet, through it all, I want to say that this is the prettiest rye at the party.

The mouth is oat and rye blondies, fresh from the oven, and fed to horses. There’s the piquancy of wooden shim lollipops, sage and bay leaf sidewalk chalk, and celery sticks with beef tallow for a conspicuously failed attempt at vegan charcuterie. My god, what a delicious homage to ants on a log!

There’s a long gorgeous finish. Think Lady Godiva’s hair as it brushes against the saddle. Or a room lined with cork and mirrors, in a checkerboard pattern, that you catch in just the right way so that you seen an infinity of yourself. It has all the attractiveness, and intractability, of a delightful math problem.

Rating:
On the scale of tough guys that understand the beauty of math–The Woodford Reserve Rye is John Urschel–Sure, he plays center for the Baltimore Ravens. But he has also just enrolled in a PhD program in math at MIT.