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I’m talking about Jesse Malin, of course. (Shame on you for conjuring up Rick Springfield… actually shame on me.)

Jesse Malin is a rock star, or would be if most of the world weren’t too busy watching American Pop Idol Star Voice crap. Over the course of his long career, he’s put out albums that have been critically acclaimed yet commercially ignored. I’ve seen him in concert a few times, as a solo artist and with a band, and even when the crowd was rather sparse, Jesse gave his all. A recent interview on Bearded.com sums up his attitude:

‘There’s a lot of hard work; long hours, bad food, soundchecks, so much waiting around but the benefits are getting to play your songs for people and having your outlet. You do it all for that hour or so on stage… you get to do things that other people dream of’.

‘Some nights you’re staying in a five star hotel playing to a sold-out house or sometimes you’re playing a Monday night in the middle of nowhere for 40 people and you’ve got to give it to them. You’re staying at the worst hotel, it’s freezing and the van breaks down’ He pauses for a second, ‘But every job has its Mondays’.

Jesse Malin is on tour – if he comes anywhere near you, please go see him. If you’re not completely blown away by his talent, I’ll give you a full refund of your ticket price. But don’t just take my word for it, take it from Mr. Green Day:

Here’s the video for a song from the new album:

And now two more of my favorite Jesse tunes…

(One of the best lines ever written: “I sometimes lie awake until sunrise, wondering how we become what we despise.”)

Like this:

I’m a fashion disaster. The poster child for “What Not To Wear.” I have a black belt in wearing the wrong color belt. Compared to me, Cousin Eddie from the Vacation movies is a GQ cover model.

My fashionista wife tries her best to cure me, but putting fancy pants on me is like putting lipstick on a pig. However, thanks to my wife and daughter, I now at least know the meaning of words like “jeggings” and “skorts.”

jeggings: leggings that look like jeans

skorts: shorts that look like a skirt

But why stop with those two combos? There are plenty more portmanteaus that should be part of the fashion vocabulary, such as:

Means: mom jeans

Fahrenhat: a knit wool cap worn even during the hottest days of summer

Flannull: Lumberjack style shirt worn by a hipster even though the only “axe” he’s familiar with is the body spray.

Fhat: Old fogey hat worn by anyone under the age of 40, like Mr. “Fedora Twins” from the Lowe’s commercial

Blank-top: a tank top “muscle shirt” worn by someone without any muscles at all

Swapkins: XXXL sweatpants that also double as napkins for wiping chicken wing sauce off your hands

Like this:

Today, we have a very special treat for all you dubbatrubba blog fans (all 2 of you): a special guest blogger. It’s my old pal Mookie.

Not baseball’s Mookie Wilson. Not basketball’s Mookie Blaylock. Just Mookie. Here’s his post:

Like most people, when I randomly think about a movie I then look it up on IMDb.com (there’s an app for that). I did that the other day with Say Anything. It’s totally a “number two” of a movie… but it does feature some great quotes. After reading several of the quotes, I realized how well they’ve held up over the years and how prophetic our pal Lloyd Dobler was.

Some of my favorite Nostra-Dobler moments:

Lloyd Dobler on Sports:

“Kickboxing. Sport of the future.”

Thanks Lloyd for the heads up on MMA’s meteoric rise! Ronda Rousey should sign her entire paycheck over to you.

Lloyd also predicted the Millennials attitude toward work:

I don’t want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don’t want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don’t want to do that.

My gosh, it’s like reading a page from Mark Zuckerberg’s high school diary!

Lloyd’s prophetic words on politics…..

You must chill. You must chill.

Lloyd on Fox News…..

Why can’t you be in a good mood? How hard is it to decide to be in a good mood and be in a good mood once in a while?

Bill O’ Reilly approves of this message.

Lloyd on how to handle the press, social media, etc.:

I admit nothing.

Lloyd on the assessment of every American foreign policy decision since “Say Anything” was released:

That was a mistake.

Other great quotes:

Constance on the future of American Fast Food:

Why do you eat that stuff? There’s no food in your food.

Morgan Spurlock, eat your french-fried heart out.

Corey on Ivy League frats…..

Brains stick with brains. The bomb could go off and their mutant genes would form the same cliques.

Thanks so much for your insights, Guest Blogger Mookie. Now I know how Wally Pipp felt. I really should just change this from dubbatrubba.com to mookie.com. Sadly though, tomorrow you’ll be stuck with more of my drivel.

Like this:

This weekend I installed a new handle on our crappy screen door because:

A. the old handle broke off

B. I’m too cheap to buy a new door

C. Even if I did buy a new door, I’d be too lazy to install it.

The old handle had no latch on the inside, so we could open the door just by shoving any part of the door with our hands, feet, butt, whatever. And our dog could escape any time she wanted unless we kept the main door closed.

The new handle does have a latch. Which means our pooch will stay put… but it also means we all have to unlearn our decade-long habit of opening the door any old way we please. To help remind everyone to push on the latch handle, I relied on a Post-It Note and the song stylings of Salt-N-Pepa…

Like this:

My Xavier Musketeers have made the Sweet 16 for the 5th time since 2008, which is great. But Scott Gleeson of USA Todayranked the 16 teams left according to their chances to cut down the nets in Indianapolis, and Xavier finished dead last. 16th out of 16. When pigs fly. Snowball’s chance in hell.

Like this:

I’m a Xavier University alum and have season tickets for their men’s basketball team, so I was thrilled that they beat Georgia State yesterday to get to the Sweet 16 in the NCAA tournament. (It’s their 5th Sweet 16 since 2008.) But I think members of the media and casual fans of the tourney were disappointed because it ended a great story line about the Georgia State coach, Ron Hunter. While celebrating his team’s win in their conference tournament finals, he blew out his Achilles tendon…

…so he had to coach in the NCAAs while wearing a boot and sitting on a rolling chair that looked like it was straight out of the Staples catalog. When his son R.J. Hunter, a junior guard on the team, hit an amazing game-winning shot in their first round upset of Baylor, he was so excited that he fell out of his chair.

As fate would have it, another Georgia State player is Kevin Ware, who suffered a gruesome broken leg in the NCAA tourney while playing for Louisville two years ago.

And this is not the first time Ron Hunter has drawn attention to his feet. In 2008 he coached a game barefoot to encourage shoe donations and raise awareness for a charity called Samaritan’s Feet that provides shoes to poor children around the world.

Georgia State’s run was a great story. It wasn’t just about the injury but also about the joy of a father coaching his son, and both of them experiencing success together. Ron gave his son a big, teary-eyed hug when he came out of the game in the waning seconds yesterday.

And Coach Hunter had a heartwarming perspective about his team’s magical run in his post-game press conference:

Like this:

Today’s Target ad touts a sale where shoes are “buy one, get one 50% off.” I didn’t realize Target sold shoes individually. Most stores sell them in pairs. I wonder which shoe is 50% off… is it the right shoe or the left shoe? Or does it vary by shoe style? Can I buy one sneaker and get 50% off a dress shoe?

Like this:

I’m thrilled to announce that this blog has received one of the most coveted consumer group endorsements in the country.

You may think that means the Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval

But this is much more prestigious. My 11-year old daughter, upon hearing that I had a blog, said “That’s so lame! Does anyone even read it?” Coming from her, that really meant a lot. After all, her previous experience with blogging comes from a Disney show called Dog with a Blog.

Basically she’d rather read posts from a canine than from her old man. So from here on out my blog will proudly display this badge of honor: