Personal Development: The Structure of Success

I wake up to the tiredness that feels like a vice gripping my face almost every morning. Then, I remember that this is a small part of the process. I sit up, change my breathing, and think about what I’m grateful for. I immerse myself in the emotion that fills me when I think of those moments of gratitude, pick up a genuine smile, before I stand up to tumble to the washroom.

As I’m brushing my teeth, I remember the scent of the mint hitting the back of my nose. That’s because I’m practicing mindfulness, where I am getting clearer with each step of the way. The more mindful I am of the events and situations that surround me, the more concrete those experiences are. I can then utilize these memories to assist me in stabilizing habitual experiences.

The only reason why I have this article written is that I scheduled it. But whether or not it is a good article depends on the feedback I receive. In many cases, people who are driven by routine tend to get lulled by that comforting routine. Instead, I have many things on my mind, but choose to practice being in the eye of the hurricane. I take 5 minutes out to write this article to share my thoughts and processes. Doesn’t that distract me? Well, let’s just say that I’m working on getting in and out of flow as a means to reduce my own knee-jerk reactions. I don’t want to be a slave to distraction, nor do I want necessary distractions to derail me.

Here’s my thought: success isn’t just about taking action. In my mind, action never always creates favorable results. Carefully thought out action is useful, but sometimes takes too much time. Sometimes, we just get lucky and hit the jackpot. But, we all know that success leave clues. Why then do you not just look at past successes and model after them? If success is about learning from your past success, that would be totally awesome. But the way to control that is to experience. This is why the art of NLP is useful.

The ability for the mind to go back in time and revivify past experiences is a powerful tool for me. If I want to get into states of motivation in order to get something done, I can. But that’s hardly taking “action”. I had to think about a past successful event first in order to think about how I got to my desired result in the first place. You can do this every time.

On the other hand, I have to also consistently reflect on emotions that don’t work for me. By reflecting on those states, I can detect triggers to that emotion. Through these triggers, I can evaluate what I feel and why. Sometimes, there’s no logical reason – it just happens to be a habit built up. So I use my skills in NLP to reprogram the habit, which requires me to first be aware of the emotional state that I am in, then allows me to pick a new habit or reaction.

The ability to observe yourself clearly and in an unbiased fashion is crucial when creating focus for your long term direction toward success. Part of this is mindset. But people who don’t know how to do this often live in a world of darkness, where even a message of joy is perceived as evil. It is necessary to consistently reflect, take stock, and to understand the workings of behavior so that you can be the mechanic of your own mind.

About Stuart Tan

Stuart Tan, MSc, MBA, SDCG, BA (Hons), is a Licensed NLP Trainer since 1997, and is Singapore's first Licensed NLP Coach Trainer, a trained counselor and trauma and depression therapist since 1999, a Master Motivational Coach with the Institute of Motivational Coaching and a leadership, team performance and change management consultant. He certifies NLP Practitioners and NLP Master Practitioners, NLP Business Practitioners and NLP Business Master Practitioners and Certified Motivational Coaches (CMC) as well as Licensed NLP Coaches.
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