You may love holding and cuddling your newborn, but the fact is, lots of babies are born, well, kinda funny-looking. If you think your little one resembles a wrinkled prune more than he does a Gerber baby, don’t sweat it; it’s not only perfectly natural, but according to a new study, it’s a perception that many adults share.

Researchers at Brock University, in St. Catharine’s, Ontario, in Canada, showed 142 adults photos of 18 babies. For each baby, the researchers showed three photos — one taken shortly after birth, one at 3 months old, and one at 6 months old. The researchers then asked each study participant how much they’d be willing to adopt the babies based on what they thought about factors like the children’s cuteness, happiness, health, and how much they thought the babies resembled their own selves.

The results revealed something very illuminating: The adults rated newborns as being the least attractive and the 6-month-olds as the most appealing. The researchers were surprised by this since newborns are the youngest and most vulnerable, and should be seen as the cutest.

Big Eyes, Big Cheeks

In the 1940s, scientists came up with the term “child schema” to describe a set of survival traits in baby animals, including humans, which make adults want to care for them. These traits include big eyes, chubby cheeks, big smiles, and cooing noises.

The Brock University researchers analyzed their findings to examine why adults saw older babies — the 6-month-olds—as the most attractive. They theorized that there may be some scientific reasons behind these perceptions:

Six months of age seemed to correlate to babies’ historical survival rates through the ages. “We wondered, why would there be this specific peak?” says Tony Volk, an associate professor of child and youth studies at Brock University who led the team of researchers, in a press release by the university. “But then, we read the medical literature, which was almost universal in that six month olds are better at surviving illnesses than younger babies.” This delay in cuteness perception may be tied to historical times when infant mortality from disease and illness was high.

Parents sometimes had to make hard choices. Because resources were scarce, parents sometimes had to make an impossible choice between a newborn and an older baby. Poor families who didn’t have enough food and already had one nursing child couldn’t nurse two at once, or only had enough food for one baby, which meant that they had to sacrifice one for the other one to thrive. “These are difficult decisions that humans have made for thousands of years,” says Volk in the press release. “A delay in attachment makes those early losses easier to cope with.”

Newborns can’t yet smile and connect with mom and dad. It can take up to a month before babies are able to consciously smile at mom, dad, or a caregiver to express happiness, which many adults naturally find endearing.

It may take time for dads to see the resemblance. Dads notice that their babies look like them when their babies are a few months old, according to previous research conducted by Volk. That recognition can increase their bond with their baby.

Take Your Time — and Get the Support You Need

Bottom line: If you don’t find yourself instantly falling head-over-heels in love with your newborn, and your heart doesn’t skip a beat every time you see your infant, rest assured: It’s perfectly normal. “We want to let parents know that if they’re not instantly grabbed by this baby as much as they thought they might be, then that’s normal. The bonding will build and grow over time,” says Volk in the press release about the study.

Give yourself time to bond and don’t beat yourself up for noticing that your beloved is a bit funny-looking. Before you know it, you’ll fall hard for those fat cheeks and baby babble, cooing and smiles. In the meantime, continue to give your baby lots of cuddles, spend time reading to your baby and have lots of skin-to-skin contact such as baby massage, and if you find that you need any support with feeling stressed, nursing, or any other type of assistance as you care for your baby and yourself, don’t hesitate to ask for help.