Former Penn State University football coach Jerry Sandusky, who is under house arrest on charges of child sexual abuse, has asked a Pennsylvania court to allow supervised visits with his grandchildren that are now prohibited. Sandusky, 67, faces 52 criminal charges that he molested 10 boys over a 15 year period and has been tethered to his house under the terms of his release on bail in December that barred contact with anyone under age 18. He has maintained his innocence.

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I would rather find a worm than a spider. I’ve found a spider in a Coke before and that was traumatizing. But I suppose finding a worm would be troubling.

A 10-year-old boy took a sip of his Capri Sun last week expecting a fruity thirst quencher to come through that yellow straw. Instead, he started choking, and then pulled a worm out of his mouth, his mom Christina Stewart told WSOC-TV. Horrified, Stewart called Kraft Foods (the parent company of Capri Sun) and was given a relaxed response. “She was like, ‘Well, I’ll just give you your money back, like it wasn’t a big deal,” Stewart recounts.

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Meth is the 21st century equivalent of the Bubonic Plague. Only this plague is carried by vile humans instead of vile rats.

Five people have been arrested after deputies raided an active meth lab within a Rutledge home. Grainger County authorities say it happened just before 1 a.m. Thursday on the 2000 block of Highway 92. The release from the sheriff says one of the suspects, Krystal Holbert, 33 of Rutledge, ran through the home when officers arrived and attempted to flush the homemade meth lab down the toilet. The meth lab exploded and burned Holbert’s face. She was treated and then transported to the Grainger County Detention Center. Sheriff Scott Layel said he is surprised at Holbert’s actions.

“It astounds me at what lengths that some of these individuals will go to continue or conceal their habits,” Layel said. “Moisture is one of the factors that causes the chemical explosion and the fact that she was attempting to flush it in a toilet is amazing to me. She could have easily killed herself, the other defendants, and the officers at the scene.”

She doesn’t care. She just wants her meth. She’ll do anything to get it. It’s all she cares about.

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Or at least you shouldn’t. Because, let’s face it, just because it’s legal to be suit happy, it isn’t moral. Take the example of this pageant mom, who’s suing the media for ‘sexualizing’ her daughter. Um, afraid not, mom. If anyone sexualized your daughter it’s the mom who dressed her.

Susanna Barrett has filed a $30 million libel suit against the parent companies of TMZ, the Huffington Post, London’s Daily Mail for their allegedly “brazen attempts to sexualize” her 5-year-old daughter, according to court documents obtained by E! News. Who’s a little creeped out?! In her suit, filed in Manhattan Supreme Court, Barrett claims that the sites posted a video (originally a TMZ exclusive) of her daughter singing along to LMFAO’s “Sexy and I Know It” in a restaurant—along with stories that blew the entire performance out of proportion.

Mom, you picked the song, you picked the outfit, you picked the venue. You sexualized your daughter. Take some responsibility.

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Forget the so-called liberal media. Right now Newt Gingrich’s most ardent critics are conservative pundits and columnists, many of whom have launched aggressive campaigns to discredit him and trip up his run for the Republican nomination.

Poor kid. Fire from his friends. Or rather, the people who know him best. Here’s what Bob Dole thinks-

“If Gingrich is the nominee it will have an adverse impact on Republican candidates running for county, state, and federal offices,” Dole wrote. “Hardly anyone who served with Newt in Congress has endorsed him and that fact speaks for itself. He was a one-man-band who rarely took advice. It was his way or the highway.”

That’s because Newt is the sort of person that all of us know from work: you know the type- it has to be his way or it’s wrong and no one else has any sense but him… Yeah. No one likes that guy.

Poor Limbaugh must be having a stroke since he can’t blame this on the ‘liberal media’.