Facebook Begins Charging to Delete Photos

Faced with continued investor skepticism over its long-term business model, Facebook has quietly started testing a new way of generating additional revenue - charging money to delete old photos.

The new settings, which are currently in beta, ask users to pay $5.00 to delete any photo more than 1 year old from their own Facebook profiles, and up to $20.00 to delete photos of themselves on other people's profiles.

Analysts say that Facebook could generate huge revenues from the new photo settings because many users are desperate to hide embarrassing pictures of themselves from family and potential employers.

Topher Anderson, an technology equities analyst at Citigroup says the new charges could single-handedly help Facebook's sagging stock price recover to its IPO level of $40 a share.

"This new photo fee is a stroke of genius," claims Anderson, "We estimate that over 50 million users will use the feature, spending on average $35 a year to delete the most embarrassing pics. The annual boost to Facebook's top line will be well over $1 billion."

A new dialog box will ask users for their credit card information.

Be Undiscovered

UBS investment banker Stephen Todd agrees that the photo fee will add revenue, and also notes that it won't add significantly to Facebook's cost structure.

"They don't have to hire new engineers," Todd explains, "They don't have to develop new features. All they have to do is change one small setting and watch the money roll in. Its pure profit."

Online privacy groups have predictably expressed outrage over the plans, but their objections are expected to be ignored. There is also some concern that the changes could prompt a user backlash, but Todd dismisses that idea outright.

"The brilliance of this charge is that it leverages Facebook's high switching costs and lack of competition," he says, "I mean come on. What are people gonna do about it? Move to Myspace?"

Facebook defends the new charge as a vital component of its new revenue model. One top executive explains that since the IPO and subsequent stock slide, the company now has a new set of priorities:

"We have to monetize where the value is. And there's a lot of value in hiding the mistakes of your past. It would be a violation of our shareholders' trust if we didn't try to squeeze revenue from our users any way we can."

"And if you don't want your grandfather thinking you're a sloppy, drunken slut, then maybe you shouldn't post pictures of yourself deep-throating a beer tap or passed out in a football player's crotch in the first place."

The new photo settings are expected to be introduced to all Facebook users sometime in March.

That was my first thought as well…I’ll delete my Facebook account. I don’t need it that bad. No thanks!

http://twitter.com/132_and_Bush George

Y’all know this is satire, right? Some of you are too stupid to live.

http://www.vote4ok.com Michael Fulks

satire surely?

http://www.facebook.com/brownscustom Erwin Dale Brown

The jabber about Facebook being a CIA project to gather images and peoples ideas is amazing. Now the government wants you to thin down the number of retarded images you have posted and they want you to fund the thinning down process? It is like Andrew Dice Clay to the hooker, “Pay you? I’m doin all the work over here!” Facebroke wants their memory cleaned out they should pay us for deleting our own dumb pictures of us pukin on our sister’s poodle fer cris sakes. You know what you can do for $5.00…..that is not a question.

LJKing

I can’t believe some people are so very stupid as to believe this is anything but satire — especially if you’ll at least look at the other articles. But, I guess for those without a decent education and who rely on Fox News, it to be expected. The GOP spent a lot of $$ getting you to this point and you haven’t let them down.

Jeff_O

this is a satirical website, you morons.

Mark Fan

Not everybody knows what you know. Ignorant is the word to use…not moron. Jeezzzz…shows how much class you have.

Concerned

But Facebook are now charging for private messages to non-friends already, I know this item maybe satire but could be facing reality not too far away….

Jim Harper

This is funny. Are the tweets listed in the above article real or are they, in the great tradition of the National Lampoon Magazine, “Tweets from the Editors”?

http://twitter.com/louistwermann Louis Wermann

When in doubt, read the “about us.”

SexyLady

lmao!!! Stealing candy from is so easy that one can’t help it, even if it is the candy that stays in the Halloween bucket until the next year because no one wants it!

ddPhone75

They should charge. They should also charge to friend strangers. Pay to access those private pics people!

MzD

It’s not true. I just deleted about a dozen albums.Just deleted them, no money or option popped up for me to pay to delete anything 1 photo or entire albums.

http://www.facebook.com/peter.bayjespersen Peter Bay Jespersen

Where’s the indication in the article that it’s satire ? Anyway, I’d say such a charge may amount to blackmail. FB sign-up page: “Its free and always will be” may be misleading & false advertising if FB charge for anything. So those are two possible charges by the authorities.. Yeah, I don’t need FB either, plus could save much time for other things without it.

peterlake

They’ve got you snookered, George.
Facebook snuck this in among the satire so that when they start charging they’ll be able to say, “Hey! We TOLD you.”

Old Chinese saying, “If you want to hide a rock, hide it among rocks.”

Joe King

dudes, a currant is a berry

Guest

I don’t think this is real. We have privacy settings… we can move all the photos to an album that isn’t viewable. It doesn’t really make much sense to me.

http://www.facebook.com/tomhoopes Tom Hoopes

It’s a fake news story. these guys do this constantly. read the headlines.

http://twitter.com/donvodki ♠ DONVODKI

may i have your attention please? where is the official source of this alleged news?…. just saying

“Free and always will be?” I think a change in slogan is going to be due if this goes through

JC

They keep trying me. I’m going to walk away and delete my entire account. How much does that cost?

herher

This would not be true

evanator

Talk about shooting yourdelf in the foot! Ever hear of snapchat or instagram? Can easily switch but prefer not to. Charge me and i am G O N E

madcone

Guys, join vk.com. They don’t charge anything and have tonn of free music;)

Shanti

Just unfriend them…that’s all you can do…deleting not even against payment…realise this

iseedumbpeople

Please tell me you are kidding this is a satire site like the onion. None of this is true its called humor.

mlee

although this is clearly fake, it brings up an interesting hypothetical: who would pay to delete that unappealing photo your friend posted after you complain about it? You, or the friend?

MELISSA

THATS SO NOT RIGHT FACEBOOK MESSED UP LOST MONEY AND NOW THEY ARE TAKING IT OUT ON THE ONES WHOM USE IT..I AM GOING TO LAUGH WHEN SOMETHING ELSE COMES ALONG AND THEN NO ONE IS USING FACEBOOK, THEY KEEP THIS UP AND THEY ARE IDIOTS

Guest

People will just start leaving facebook… So many have already. It was a cool platform. It isn’t anymore

http://www.facebook.com/donald.oberloh Donald Oberloh

Maybe they are moronic. i don’t know them, do you?

http://www.facebook.com/theoriginaldjfender Fender Edwards

Welp, off to google plus with me, even if this is satire, I see it coming.

Jimbo

Thats because its a new policy. You just lucky you got it done before they post the charges to your PayPal acct.

no

well if facebook does do this, im going to watermark all my photos with a “fuck you facebook”.

Lex Luxa

you, then your friend will upload it again and again till you run out of money to delete it, and you won’t be friends anymore. l

wolfendenpackleader

isn’t $5-$20 a pop expensive ? the $1 charge for sending a message to a person not on your friend list popped up on me 1 time. I refused to bite and as my friends and I say, go suck an egg Facebook.