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Playing Doctor With My Boyfriend: The Totally Gross Story of How I Spent My Weekend

Forget date night and definitely forget about watching porn together (and sexy time at all for that matter). This past weekend, J and I survived (barely!) our first weekend home sick at the same time since the big move and, boy, did things get REAL fast.

We’ve been floating on cloud nine ever since J moved in with me a month ago. It’s been pretty freakin’ romantic besides a mishap here or there and I’ve been honest about it all. Everyone always talks about the sweet perks of being in a relationship or even about the got-to-try sex tips to make your guy’s jaw drop. But, gals, when you actually live with your boyfriend, really gross stuff is bound to happen. It just so happens that all of that not-so-sexy-but-really-REAL stuff about being, well, HUMAN suddenly had to occur in one weekend for us.

The sinus infection/head cold/sexy time killer from Hell came into our lives right around Thanksgiving. It started with a benign cough and sleepiness for us both and morphed into a phlegm monster intent on encouraging a dry spell that could break records (well, for us anyway). We decided date night would be spent at home, on the couch, watching the newest Harry Potter (We had planned to watch the Victoria’s Secret fashion show that we had DVRed but I’m no masochist ). Tissues were thrown everywhere, we Neti Pot-ed together (so gross, but SO good) and we slept with the humidifier on that night (it doesn’t get hotter than that, I know).

Just when our weekend couldn’t get any more unromantic (and, well, gross), the new medicine we both started began messing with our stomachs. Remember that episode of Sex and the City where Charlotte and Harry got food poisoning? Well, we weren’t that bad, but it certainly felt like it at the time (and, hello, only ONE bathroom!). On Sunday afternoon J looked over at me and said, “This just got REAL.”

I suppose, in a way, we’ve crossed another relationship milestone. I mean, we went through something. These are the parts of a mature relationship that no one talks about that bring you closer when you go through them together because, hey, it’s real life!

Have you ever been sick with your boyfriend at the same time? Think this is a (although unpleasant) "relationship milestone"? Do you have any totally gross (but real!) stories like this? Will J and I ever feel better and end our dry spell? Sigh.