My first care pack is being delivered this morning to a mom whose baby was born at 26 weeks. My co-worker Kate personally knows the mom. Her husband Scott is a photographer and owns Great Scott Images. He is going up to the NICU this morning to take some photos of the baby – which I think is really cool. So Scott is delivering the carepack personally. Its extra special knowing that a friend of a friend will be receiving the very first care pack!

Happy fathers day to all the dads out there. I feel so blessed that Jason is such a great, engaged daddy to our girls. I am also remembering my dad who is in heaven, and was the best dad ever. Today I am also thinking of the dads that lost children. May they find peace today.

I almost have 5 care packs, and 5 memory boxes complete! I just need to pick up some final things for the care packs, and I am waiting for a few things yet that people are donating. Each of the care packs has been running me around $25.00 to put together. As of right now I have included the following: blanket, handmold kit, stuffed animal, journal, photo album, word search book and pen, hand sanitizer, hand lotion, lip balm, and tissues. I think the last thing I want to add is a bottle of water. I know I was always thirsty and searching for water when I would visit Nevaeh. Does anyone have any other ideas of nice things I should include? I am always looking for ideas and suggestions!!

In memory of Nevaeh – I would like to have all my friends and family participate in a random act of kindness day on July 11 – the 5 year anniversary that Nevaeh became an angel.

I plan on bringing my first care packs and memory boxes to the NICU on July 11th. I ask that you do something simple and kind on this day – whether it be to a co-worker, a friend, a family member, or even a stranger! It doesn’t have to be something big, or cost a lot of money. You can bring someone flowers, give a stranger a compliment, buy a co-worker a soda or coffee, put money in an expired parking meter, pay for the order in the car behind you at the drive thru – any thing!!

Love and kindness are what makes this world a better place. And it would make me so happy to have everyone participate in a day like this in memory of my daughter. If you do participate – I would love for you to leave a comment – and tell me all about it!

I have been so blessed with many great friends and family in my life! My co-worker and great friend Kate Eastman bought enough fabric to make 4 fleece baby blankets for my project! She brought the first one in for me today, and it is absolutely adorable. These blankets are perfect because they fit perfectly into the isolettes. I have several keepsake ones that Nevaeh used.

Thank you Kate!!

My project is well under way! I have actually applied to be a division of Project Sweet Peas – a non-profit organization that does the same thing I do! I would still be responsible for funding everything, and working under the name Nevaeh’s Rainbow Project, but will be able to use their large network of suppliers and discounts, fundraisers, and non-profit status. I should hear from them by the end of next week. I am so excited about all of this! I can’t even tell you how good it feels as I have wanted to do something like this for so long!

I thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.
I thought about you yesterday and the day before that too.
I think of you in silence. I often say your name.
But all I have are memories and your picture in a frame.
Your memory is my keepsake, with which I’ll never part.
God has you in His keeping. I have you in my heart.
I shed tears for what might have been. A million times I’ve cried.
If love alone could have saved you, you never would have died.
In life I loved you dearly. In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place, no one can ever fill.
It broke my heart to lose you, but you didn’t go alone.
For part of me went with you, the day God took you home.-Author unknown

Slowly but surely I am starting to get the stuff together for my first care packs and memory boxes! I am so excited! I recieved my first monetary donation, which helped me buy items for almost 5 memory box items! Thank you so much everyone for supporting my cause. It means so much to me!

Today would be Nevaeh’s 5th birthday. It’s hard to imagine that I would have a 5-year-old. I wonder what my life would be like if she was still here. I know it wouldn’t be easy – but is life meant to be easy? I know we would have a lot of challenges, and each of her milestones would be so much sweeter. All I can do now is remember the short six weeks she was here on earth with us, and look forward to the day I see her again. It brings me peace knowing that my dad is now up in heaven with his sweet granddaughter. We forever have a guardian angel looking over us.

Although the pain has eased in the past 5 years, it has never – or will never – go away. A parent should never have to lose a child. It is a pain and a deep ache in your heart that can never be explained unless you have experienced it for yourself. It’s like there is this missing piece of you. The day I lost Nevaeh, I lost a piece of my soul that I can never get back.

Everyone please take the time to hug your beautiful children today and tell them how much you love them. I know I plan to do that with McKenna and Macey. I also plan on singing happy birthday to Nevaeh tonight with the girls. I think McKenna is finally at an age that I can start teaching her and telling her about her big sister Nevaeh.