Friday, May 28, 2004

Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

******************************************* Runners up:

Teacher Debbie Moon's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different color hair than the other family members. One child suggested that he was adopted. A little girl said, "I know all about adoptions because I was adopted." "What does it mean to be adopted?" asked another child. It means," said the girl, "that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy."

******************************************* A four year old was at the pediatrician for a check up. As the doctor looked in her ears with an otoscope, he asked, "Do you think I'll find Big Bird in here?" The little girl stayed silent. Next, the doctor took a tongue depressor and looked down her throat. He asked, "Do you think I'll find the Cookie Monster down there?" Again, the little girl was silent. Then the doctor put a stethoscope to her chest. As he listened to her heart beat, he asked, "Do you think I'll hear Barney in there?" "Oh, no!" the little girl replied. "Jesus is in my heart. Barney's on my underpants."

******************************************* On my way home one day I stopped to watch a Little League baseball game that was being played in a park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first-base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was. "We're behind 14 to nothing," he answered with a smile. "Really," I said. "I have to say you don't look very discouraged." "Discouraged?" the boy asked with a puzzled look on his face. "Why should we be discouraged? We haven't been up to bat yet".

******************************************* Whenever I'm disappointed with my spot in life, I stop and think about little Jamie Scott. Jamie was trying out for a part in a school play. His mother told me that he'd set his heart on being in it, though she feared he would not be chosen. On the day the parts were awarded, I went with her to collect him after school. Jamie rushed up to her, eyes shining with pride and excitement. "Guess what Mom," he shouted, and then said those words that will remain a lesson to us all........... "I've been chosen to clap and cheer."

*******************************************

An eye witness account from New York City, on a cold day in December some years ago: A little boy about 10 years old was standing before a shoe store on Broadway, barefooted, peering through the window, and shivering with cold. A lady approached the boy and said, "My, but you're in such deep thought staring in that window!" "I was asking God to give me a pair of shoes," was the boy's reply.

The lady took him by the hand and went into the store and asked the clerk to get half a dozen pairs of socks for the boy. She then asked if he could give her a basin of water and a towel. He quickly brought them to her. She took the little fellow to the back part of the store and, removing her gloves, knelt down, washed his little feet, and dried them with a towel. By this time the clerk had returned with the socks. Placing a pair upon the boy's feet, she purchased him a pair of shoes. She tied up the remaining pairs of socks and gave them to him. She patted him on the head and said, "No doubt, you will be more comfortable now." As she turned to go, the astonished kid caught her by the hand, and looking up into her face........ with tears in his eyes, asked her ........"Are you God's wife?"

*******************************************The winner was:

A four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."

Hope this put a smile on your face...it sure did mine, as well as a tear.

It is so quiet here. Almost unreal. Brook is at a friend's house for the day and Hunny has left for work. Feels weird. I have been sitting in the swing outside drinking a glass of lemonade watching the storm get closer. The wind is blowing the grass. It looks like waves of water except it is green. The trees are bending their branches. Some rose petals fluttered by, some landing at my feet. Belle, the white horse, was standing at the fence looking off in the distance with the wind whipping her mane back away from her face. Crystal , her mother, was grazing behind her. I heard a whinney and looked around. Precious was standing at the watering trough, looking at me. Blackie, my big black tomcat was rolling in the dirt. Baby, the yellow kitten was stalking Stinker, Brook's dog. Some blue birds flew by and landed in the tree in front of me. Off in the distance I can hear the thunder rumble while the sky gets darker. The first drop of rain plopped on my leg. Time to go inside.

10 minutes has gone by and the sun is shining thru the raindrops, will it keep raining? I wonder. No matter. There is peace in my home.

Thursday, May 27, 2004

A friend of mine has this terrible disease that so many do not understand. Below is a poem that was written by a man that has it also. Read it and try to understand what they go through. Life is not easy for them. It could be someone you know.

Fibromyalgia the Demon Within

One day it appeared within you out of the blue full of pain no one could see or hear.

Not knowing where this evil demon came from, but it is here within you holding you down

Causing you never ending pain within the depth of your soul this demon lives and raising its ugly head only to you

You try to cry out to others but know one can hear, as the demon doesn’t show its power to anyone but you

It is real why can’t anyone else see this demon within you causing you such pain.

Crying out for help but no one listens no one seems to care

All they do is look at you like you are crazy and don’t want to be near you.

This demon is real as real as you or I, always here within holding you down laughing with the pain it give, taunting you with every waking moment

This demon won’t let you sleep won’t let you free from its grasp or the torment of never ending pain

Crying out hoping someone will hear your cries only to find your cries come upon death ears

You tell your love ones how much you hurt but all they say, you don’t look as if you are in pain

or it’s just in your mind, but you know it’s real as real as you

You go to the doctors hoping they will make it go away only to find that there is nothing they can do

You wonder why this demon choose you and not someone else wondering why me what did I do to deserve all this pain

There is no reason why you were chosen to bare this pain from this demon called Fibromyalgia

Oh yes it has a name given by the doctors not knowing what it is

They give you medication saying it will help, but nothing really helps to hold this demon down

The medication causes more and more problem outside of the demon; it seems to bring more demons within

All we can do is live our life with the demons within ourselves trying to hold on until we die

We all search for others to understand that we are not alone and to find others to talk to that understand how we feel deep within

Once we have found others like us it makes it easier to cope with the demon call Fibromyalgia.

Thanks to all of the new friends we found we can cope somewhat better in life to know we are not alone

It seems they are the only ones that can see or hear the demon in each of us with this demon called Fibromyalgia.

Today has been one of those days, not bad not great just okay. Got up late. It was 7:30. I cannot believe I slept in! Took my meds and went to get Precious. I took care of cleaning her wound and hosing her clean. After that I watered part of the garden, picked a peach, and cooked breakfast. O yea, washed a load ,dried a load and washed dishes. Then it was 10:00 and I went to Walmart and bought a few groceries. When I got back it was time to do Precious again and give her a shot. Then fix lunch and pack hunny's supper and sent him to work.

FINALLY I was able to get online! I was going into withdrawal. I needed to get my puter fix or I would go NUTS!!!! Now I am here and I am blank.The outside world has fallen to the side and I am here and nothing else matters. When I come here it seems that no matter what is going on in my life I find peace here. I do not know what will happen in my life but I know that I will always have this. No noise if I don't want any, no arguments unless I allow it. I can play games, write in my blog or chat with some friends, read mail, write mail, whatever I want. And if someone tells me I am wrong I can click them off.

Yesterday I had to get some more antibiotics from the vet. He gave me penicillian to inject in her. It is a big shot but she takes it well. She is such a sweetheart.Here is a picture of us taken last July. Isn't she beautiful? She will be there again. The shots seem to be working. There is still a lot of pus running out of her neck but the lumps reduced in size overnight. I can see some fat globlets in her neck around the opening. I did not recognize them at first then I realized what I was seeing. LOL My horse is a bit fat which was a big plus for her. If she had not been the few days she went without eatting would have serverly damaged her. Thank you all for your prayers and please continue as she is not out of danger yet.

Monday, May 24, 2004

ANDY ROONEY on women over 40 ===== Andy Rooney says, "As I grow in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 40 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom.
Few women past the age of 40 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant.
Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved.They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 40 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. They always know. A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart,well-coifed hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize. ANDY ROONEY

The weekend is over and the headache is gone to work. That is right I said the headache is gone. He was such a grumpy all weekend that I am so glad he has left for work. Usually I hate it when he leaves but not today, today it is a blessing. No matter what I did or said there would be something wrong. LOL he asked me if I wanted to shoot the gun with him, I had to say no because he was irritating me so bad that I would have accidently shot him! LOL. Enough of that.

School is out and already I am hearing I am bored. I keep telling myself patience, patience. School starts back August 2nd. Is it so wrong of me to wish it was here already?

Well I got a surprise. Aren't they cute? They are under my bed. There are 4 of them. It looks like 3 in this picture but the one that is looking at you is behind another baby. This is the first litter in the last 4 that Susie Had more than 1 baby. She is a good mama. Heavens help you if she does not want you to see her babies, she will attack. LOL

Saturday, May 22, 2004

Today is a hot day. Thunder booming off in the distance, clouds overhead with the sun bouncing in and out all day long. Out I go to cut the grass. Maybe I can beat the rain. Probally will, the rain tends to pass over when I want it to stay.

Friday, May 21, 2004

May 13, 2004 U.S. Senator Zell Miller Floor Statement on the Situation at Abu Ghraib prison Remarks as Delivered on the Senate Floor
Mr. President, here we go again, here we go again.
Rushing to give aid and comfort to the enemy.
Pushing and pulling and shoving and leaping over one another to assign blame and point the finger at America the Terrible.
Lining up in long lines at the microphones to offer apologies to those poor, pitiful Iraqi prisoners.
Of course, I do not condone all the things that went on in that prison, but I for one, Mr. President, refuse to join in this national Act of Contrition over it.
Those who are wringing their hands and shouting so loudly for "heads to roll" over this seem to have conveniently overlooked the fact that someone's head HAS rolled - that of another innocent American brutally murdered by terrorists.
Why is it? Why is it that there's more indignation over a photo of a prisoner with underwear on his head than over the video of a young American with no head at all?
Why is it that some in this country still don't get that we are at war? A war against terrorists who are plotting to kill us every day. Terrorists who will murder Americans at any time any place any chance they get.
And yet here we are, America on its knees, in front of our enemy, begging for their forgiveness over the mistreatment of prisoners.
Showing the enemy and the world once again how easily America can get sidetracked and how easily America can turn against it self.
Yes, some of our soldiers went too far with their interrogation tactics and clearly were not properly trained to handle such duty.
But the way to deal with this is with swift and sure punishment, and immediate and better training.
There also needs to be more careful screening of who it is we put in these kinds of sensitive situations.
And no one wants to hear this, Mr. President and I'm reluctant to say it. But there should also be some serious questioning of having male and female soldiers serving side by side in these kinds of military missions.
But instead, I worry that the HWA - the Hand-Wringers of America - will add to their membership and continue to bash our country ad nauseam. And in doing so, hand over more innocent Americans to the enemy on a silver platter.
So I stand with Senator Inhofe of Oklahoma, who stated that he's "more outraged by the outrage" than by the treatment of those prisoners.
More outraged by the outrage. It's a good way of putting it. That's exactly how this Senator from Georgia feels.
Thank you Mr. President. I yield the floor.

My best friend is second grade, hummmmmmmmm, well that is easy, Kim. Kim was the prettiest girl in the class and also the sweetest. She would make a point to include me in games and if the other kids said no then she would sit with me until they said okay. Throughout the years no matter how far apart we are or how many years it has been since we have spoken, we have always found each other in the truly hard times. we may not be best friends now but we will always have a connection in our hearts

Today is the last day of school. I have a feeling this will be a long summer. It takes more to keep her entertained and we live out in the country with no neighbors that have kids her age. I will figure out something for her to do. Bought her a sprinkler, she likes that. I will probally sign her up for swim lessons. She needs to learn to swim. I cannot have her not knowing that. I do not know how to swim so I will make sure she can.

Today is also the last day of school for my niece. She graduates from high school tonight. She is a beautiful young lady. Driven to be a success. She started taking college classes this past fall. She had finished all of her classes except for one so she just attended half day and was dismissed to go to college classes. She plans on getting her BS in Nursing. She is also working part time at the hospital pushing patients. I am so proud of her. She managed to survive being a spoiled brat.

I went to the Doctor Tuesday and had some tests done. Some bloodwork and just a general overall. I had lost 4 pounds since Feb. Well I had some good news yesterday. She got my test results back and my cholesterol level had gone down. It was 267 in Feb. and now it is 241! I was real pleased with that. I had been dieting and had been doing some walking to lower it. I know it is still high but because I did get it down I do not have to go on meds for it as of yet. I did get some bad news. my thyriod is out of whack. I have to start taking meds for that. So here goes an endless round of bloodwork to get the levels normal. I will be going next month for a thyriod scan and my mammogram. I have a lump that I have to keep an eye on. It has not grown in almost 2 years so they are not too worried about it. It is not a fluid filled cyst as that has been ruled out. As long as there is no growth I am okay. The second there is any change......

Today started early. I got up at 430 to fix hot tea and myhunny's lunch. We had a cup together and then went to get Precious to give her meds to her. Since she is refusing to eat the grain I am dissolving the meds in water and filling up a huge syringe with it. 60 CC syringe, about the size of a small turkey baster. It takes 2 of us to do that. I have to insert it in the corner of her mouth and raise her head and then push it deeper in her mouth and give it a squirt. And hold her head up high until she swallows it. It is fun LOL.

Last night a place on her shoulder ruptured and fluids came out. Well during the night more of the fluids came out and that place is no longer swollen. The skin is coming off in that spot but that is okay. It will grow back. The infection is draining and that is important.

She is getting ornery but that is okay too. It shows she is feeling better cause she is tired of being messed with. I probally won't get to ride her this summer but that is okay as long as she is okay.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

My hunny was off today so I had help with Precious. We had a good day. Had a fight with Precious this morning to get her meds in her but I won. This evening we tried a different approach. I put it in a huge syringe and squirted it in her throat. I will have hunny's help all weekend thank goodness. A place on her neck ruptured tonight and a lot of fluids came out of it. No smell , just watery blood. So something is going right.

I think I will go to bed now and write more tomorrow. this week has been draining on me emotionally and physically.

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

I cannot catch Precious tonight. I tried for 2 hours and she would not let me get close to her. She needs her meds. She could die from infection if she does not get them. I was cleaning her today and watched several chunks, yes I do mean chunks, of flesh fall out of her holes in her neck. I cried. It is so hard to do this knowing that everyday some more of the muscle in her neck is going torot and fall out. It hurts so much seeing her in pain. Left untreated she will die. I don't want her to die. I love her. Some people do not understand how I could love an animal that was responsible for me breaking my back, but I do. She is a sweet, smart horse. She is also very strong willed. She knows that I am hers. It hurts that she will not let me catch her. I know she hates the meds, they are bitter, and the washing out of the wound is pure pain. How would you like it if someone kept pouring peroxide in an open would that you had? Not just once but over and over again.

My hunny said he will try to catch her when he gets home. That will be after 1 am.

Today is sick day. Everybody is on antibiotics. Brook has strep, I have sinusitis, and my hunny had dental work and of course Precious has a hole in her neck. I feel great except I cannot bend over too good. The pressure is awful but I will get over it. Brook will be back in school tomorrow for the last time until school starts back in August. And hunny, well........ he'll never be all right, after all he is a man.

Monday, May 17, 2004

Today I went to the school to watch an award ceremony for kindergartners. Brook , my granddaughter won sever. She recieved second place award for reading, plus two other awards that had to do with reading. She also won 2 computer awards. She is pretty good on them. LOL she had to learn how to read pictures instead of words. You know a thumbs up or a picture of a door (for exit). That confused her at first because she knew the words not symbols. She also got an award for being helpful, one in art and PE. One she did not get was good conduct. She talks WAYYYYYY to much. LOL.

My horse is doing okay. She is so patience with me. She has total trust in me. I was afraid that she would hate me. I know what I am doing to her is causing a great deal of pain but she stands there and allows me to do it.

Hunny and I got into it today over nothing. He is so angry about what happened and it is causing a great deal of turmoil inside of him. So we start snipping at each other. It will be okay. Not the first time , won't be the last.

Hunny rode Belle today. She is a beautiful spoiled baby. She did not want to stop. She is just in the learning stage. It was so funny! He finally jumped off and she stopped. He tried to lead her and she would not move! She wa doing the opposite of what he wanted today.

Well I am going to make me a hot cup of capiccino and hit the sack. Tomorrow will be another long day.

I read this today and I thought to myself ,"how very true." My life for example, I always did what I was told to do, it did not matter if I liked it or not. I spent all of my teen years and most of my adulthood unhappy. At times I wished I was dead. I married, not for love but because it was "the right thing to do". I guess getting the crap beat out of you regularly was the "right" thing. I was supposed to be happy after all my daughter was with her father. After numberous times of getting hurt and other unspeakable things, after being told by the police that he had the right to do those things because we were married, called a liar by his mother (she said that I squeezed my own throat and hit myself so hard to cause bruices to get her son in trouble) even all that did not make me leave him. What did was when he beat me up and threw me on my daughter's bed while she was asleep. I looked at her face and thought that no child should ever see that. I left the next day when he left for work.

Throughout the years I did what I was told was the right thing. Went to school and got a degree in Respiratory. It was the right thing to do. Pays good, good benefits. Sure but my tender heart could not take all the death. No that's not true, the death I could take....it was the trying to save someone life who does not want me too but the family says do it. I dealt with people that had advanced lung diseases. When you look down and see this frail body and know that only 15 minutes before he had said goodbye I am going home and you have to preform CPR on him...... my heart and mind could not go on any longer. I was not doing what I like and I was not happy. A happy person does not take Valium just so they could go to work.

I am happy now. I am at home on a farm. I have my garden, my horses, my cats, my granddaughter, my hunny. I have been given the freedom to stay at home and enjoy those things. I have been given the love that gives me so much happiness. Sure we fight, we make up, at times I don't like him and he doesn't like me but we love each other. I have been given the freedom to do what I like and with that came happiness for the first time in years.

Sunday, May 16, 2004

Here are some more pictures. The vet came out this morning and gave her shots and pills. He said that it was the worse beating from another horse he had seen in a long time. I have to give her 10 antibiotic pills twice a day and 1 pain pill twice a day. I also have to boil the place on her neck out with peroxide twice a day and hose her down for at least 10 minutes on each side to help reduce the swelling. She is so good. She stands there and lets me do what needs to be done. It may be a minimum of 2 months before I can even think of riding her again.

I brought my Precious home yesterday. That stud and another mare almost killed my horse. We went over to check on her and found her in a pasture by herself,her head hanging down. That in itself was unusual.She is a proud horse and keeps her head up. The closer I got to het the angier I got. She was hurt and not just a little bit. She had benn beat up bad. They claimed to have called me when it happened , which was a lie because I have caller ID. According to them she got into a fight with another mare and that mare put her through a fence and a stick went into her neck. Numerous cuts and scratches and bite marks, maggots crawling in open wound, her tail cut (not the hair) puncture marks in her and lumps, HUGE lumps. Do not look at the following pictures unless you can take it. They are bad and the camera does not do it justice, you cannot smell the infection.

I lived in Las Vegas for a while and met several stars. 2 really stand out. The first one was Robert Uriah when he was fliming his series Vegas. They were fliming at the shopping center right behind where my sister lived. I was standing there with my daughter. She was sitting in her stroller. Ater they finished the shoot he came towards where I was standing and said hi what a beautiful little girl and kissed her on top of her head! I was thinking NO ME PLEASE!!!!!MEMEMEME!!!

The second one was Wayne Newton. I waited on him in the children clothing store I worked in. He was so nice and smelled good!

Today is my birthday I am 45 years old. I am offically middle aged. LOL. Does that mean I have lived half my life? Is everything downhill from now? Or is the best years still to come?

The female members of my family have all lived to be in their nineties with the exception of my Mama who lived until she was 86 and my Aunt that died in childbirth back in 1920. Does that mean I will live that long? No chance of me dying in childbirth seeing how I can no longer have children. But will the world still be here in 2069 when I turn 90? Just think 2069. Sci-fi books were based in those years, will they come true? What will life be like then? Do I even want to be here then? Will I still be able to go outside and see blue skys and stars at night? Will I be alone?

Friday, May 14, 2004

I am including a link here and in my favorite links section for animal rescue. When you click it it helps to feed the animals. it can be clicked everyday. So if you have the time click it. And thanks in advance.

Tomorrow is my birthday so today I had to go get my new driver's license. Ok, I know I could have mailed it in if I had the form but I did not recieve one =(. Well I called ahead to see what it would cost and what the hours were. I also asked if they can use old picture. They told me yes. Thank goodness I thought. The picture is a good one of me. I went to Walmart first as I had to pick up a few things and on my way out of the store it came a downpour! I was so glad but boy did I get wet. Got to the office and went in to get my license. Took a number and looked around, only 2 people there, this will be quick. Waited about 5 minutes and they called my name. I went up to the counter they took my license and they asked me some questions about being an organ donor and if I wanted to give a dollar to help with the blind. Of course I said yes. I have always checked yes. Looked in the eye test and then they said $9 please. I gave them the money and they threw my license in a shreader!!! I said wait you told me you would use the old picture! She said no we never do unless you mail it in. I was mad. I was not ready for a picture. No makeup, hair pulled back in ponytail,wet and in a Tigger tshirt. I have seen better looking mug shots! I will be losing this license and getting another one. Bad is one thing, ugly is another.

Thursday, May 13, 2004

Went to my very first group chat tonight. I joined a group for newbie bloggers an d have met some of the nicest people and have found some great new journals. It is in aol.groups. It is called New to Journals?! Help us! A really nice way to find some great journals and people.

So much of success in life has to do withhow well you are able to bounce like a ball.

Some of us bounce like a multi-colored super-ballwhile others like a lead cannonball.

~Jake Ehrlich III~That statement gave me something to think about. I thought of different times in my life where it felt like I was going under and somehow I always bounced back. Sometimes it was a little bounce and others I bounced so high that it was scary. God always helped me through all those times even when I was pushing him away. He gave me the bounce I needed.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Yesterday I took my Precious to meet her bridegroom. She walked into that field with her proud head held high. Oh boy. I then heard a scream! The stud saw her and came flying across the field! Oh she gave him a run for his money. He chased her all over smelling her whenever he could get close enough. She was so beautiful running around. She holds her tail up and it flys behind her! Beautiful sight to behold. Today I went back over to see her, I wish I hadn't. I wanted to cry. She was standing by herself in the shade of a tree and when she saw me she whinnied and came running over. She kept pushing on the gate trying to open it to get out and talking up a storm. I imagined she was cussing me in horse talk telling me to take her home. The stud say and came running over and chased her off and they started kicking each other. She had bite marks all over her. I do not like the horse mating ritiual. It reminds me of men that are abusers. I had to leave. I know it is a process they go through to bring them into heat but oh it is so scary watching it. This is the way it is done natural in nature. Nothing artifical, no line to stand in to be serviced but my poor Precious. I don't know if I can take 3 weeks of this.

Today is such a good day! LOL Hard to believe I have PMS!!! LOL I had a hysterectomy back in January and thought finally no more!!! Well duh, I forgot that if an ovary is left in............ So now I have hot flashes and PMS!! LOL! But today is good! It is cloudy outside with a slight breeze blowing. Helped Hunny saddle up his horse and sent him down the drive for a ride. PEACE AND QUIET HERE NOW!!! In just a bit I will go outside and play in my garden for awhile. It is the best kind of therapy I know.

This war is starting to feel like another Vietnam. I do not see a peaceful end to it. We are over there fighting people who have been fighting wars all the lives and their parents lives and their grandparents lives and so on. It is a way of life for them.

This may make people mad at me but if you are going into an area where there is a war going on and those people HATE you, well something is going to happen. Yes beheading is drastic but in that culture it happens, and not just in wartime. OOOPS I'm sorry it seems like I remember the annoucement that the war is over. BULL HOOKEY!, as Colonel Potter would say. There has been more killed since the war was "over" than was killed in the war. The fighting has never stopped and will probally continue until the end of time. We will finally leave and they will fight again about something else or just continue fighting us here with more terrorists acts. Will it ever end?

Everyone who has an animal that stays inside really need to go to this site PetRescueSticker. They are giving away stickers for you to put in your window to alert rescue workers that there is a pet in the home that will need rescuing too. A fire can happen anytime, anywhere. Our smaller members of our families need us and this is another way to help them.

Monday, May 10, 2004

This evening I went outside to work in my garden. When I got out to it I had to just stop and stand there for awhile. There was about a dozen barn shallows flying around the garden area catching bugs. It is a sight to see! They are beautiful graceful flyers and so very fast. Nature's mosquito catcher.

.Got a phone call from the school. I laughed when I spoke to the teacher. Someone had brought her a kitten to school and she could not kep it. Well Brook popped up and said I will take it! OMG I have 6 kittens right now that could use new homes and I am not sure but I believe there is another batch on the way! Sure we live on a farm but dang I can only take so many cats. my hunny is threatening to get rid of them all now as it is! But around here cats stay!!!

my day started good. I got up and fixed breakfast then went to church. Church had a definate funny spot in it. The pastor was giving out plants to the youngest mother and the oldest mother. Well when the 83 year old stood up, Brokk goes "Mamaw you are older than that!" I wanted to die!!! I am not sure if it was embarassment or because it was so funny. I got real close to being the youngest mother. They got up to 35 and everyone said to give it to the pastor's daughter. She was in the nursry with her little one. She is 23. She did not want it but they said too bad!

The rest of the day went good, lunch at Piza Hut then home to a movie and then I went and played in my garden. BUT not before I almost killed me and the lawnmower. I decided to ride the mower and ran over an electric cord that was plugged in. Lawnmower quit and would not restart. Thank goodness it turned out to be only wire wrapped around the blades. And it was not wire from cord. It was wire from electric fence. His fault not mine. AND HE DID ADMIT IT!!!!!! Now that was the best present ever!!!

Saturday, May 8, 2004

I am all alone tonight. Brook is in bed and my hunny is at his mother's house. She is leaving town in the morning for Indiana and this may be the last time he will see her. She has serious health problems. Today has been kind of a bummed out day. I did not want to do anything and so I didn't. I am sure to hear about it later but I will do my best to let it go over my head. Just don't feel like fighting.

I think it has a little to do with my daughter not being here for yet another Mother's Day and a lot to do with my Mama not being here. I miss her. It has been 15 months since she died and it still feels like yesterday. I guess that is an improvement, at least it does not feel like today now. I hope that if you still have your mother that you go see her or talk to her more than just on holidays. Don't let any excuse get in the way because she will not be here forever. When they are gone it is to late to say what you want to them. Telling their headstone is not the best way to say anything to them. I'm sorry .Bye

Today I took Brook to see her mother. She had madea Mother's Day card for her but they would not give it to her. Said it had to be mailed in. What harm could it have done to allow her to get that? Any way she did get to see it but she had to hold it up to glass so her mama could see it. 15 minutes every Saturday is all she is allowed and the visit is behind glass everytime. 5 more months and she comes home then the real world will kick in for her. I pray that she can handle it without reverting back to her former behavior.

Friday, May 7, 2004

What a day! Today was field day at Brook's school. I worked the potato sack race. It was so much fun. I laughed so much at these kids trying to hop to the finish line. There were all kinds of games for the kids, water balloons fights, races ball games and lots others.

The finiale was the Tug of war between the teachers and parent volunteers on one side and the forth graders on the other side. Well they whooped us! LOL.

Wednesday, May 5, 2004

Brook had a field trip today for Cinco de Mayo. They went to a restruant and ate. The food there is great but the service was terrible! This trip was booked 3 months ago and they were not ready for us. We had 67 kids that were hungry and they had yet to cook the food. We were supposed to go there 30 minutes bfore they opened for business but they did not let us in until 11 am. These kids are used to eatting at 10:30. They had 2 wait people to serve 67 kids and 16 adults. The kids were whining because some were not getting there food. Some had to wait about 30 minutes from the time the first kids were served. I was mad. Afterwards they went to park and broke pinatas and played games.

Brook was pooped when she came home from school. She went into her bedroom and got out her barbies and fall asleep in the floor. Poor baby it has been a busy week for her and it is not over!

Someone asked me about smoking today. I used to smoke. I started smoking when I was 12 years old. Started on Kools.I smoked them until I was 15 and switched to Marlboro. Should have quit. I went to doc caused I was coughing blood, told me it was because of smoking, in particular smoking Kools. Said there was fiberglass in filters that was getting in my lungs and that was why I was bleeding. I was smoking 2 packs a day. Over the years I would smoke from less than half pack a day to over 3 packs. Went to school and got my degree in Respiratory and still continued smoking. Here I was sucking out peoples lungs that were full of snot from smoking or running a vent on people that had lung problems, giving breathing treatments, all the while I myself was continuing to smoke myself. The turning point came after my granddaughter was born. She was 5 months old and coughing, I quit that day. 3 packs a day. Cold turkey. Hardest thing I ever did. It is still hard. There are times when I still want one and it has been 6 years now. Turns out the reason she was coughing is because she has asthma and that she was having asthma attack.

Now my hunny is trying to quit again. It is hard on him and us. He is wearing the patch and doing well as far as not smoking. BUT I sometimes want to stick a smoke in his mouth! He went for 4 weeks on step 1 now he is down to step 2 but he does not know that. He never sees the patch because I put it on him and cover with a large bandaid because of his job. Been on it for 2 weeks going in third. I will keep you posted as to his progress.

Another day of rain. It was supposed to be nice this morning but oh no it had to rain. Today was another field trip at school. We went to IMAX and watched Underwater. To those of you that do not know,IMAX is 3-D theater. It was really something. The fish were right there! All the kids were reaching out and trying to catch them. Now this was a group of 5 and 6 year olds so they were young enough to be totally fascinated! LOL There were a lot of adults doing the same thing!

Sunday, May 2, 2004

It is a cold and dreary day. Rain. Need it but now would love some sunshine.

Gonna go to mother-in-law and take her some smokes. She will not quit eventhough she should. She has lung and heart problems. Then out to dinner for Mother's Day and her birthday since she won't be here for that.

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SCUM!! THAT IS ALL IT IS!!! Yes this is a RANT!!! I just cleaned out the trap in the dishwasher YUCK!!! It was full of soap scum.YUCK! Gonna go turn the hot water heater up a notch. LOL Rewashing all dishes.

Worst advice I have ever recieved was "come on try it just once" Tried it and got hooked. It is coke and I am happy to say that when I realized that I had to have it I quit but not before I was spending $300 a week on it. Not much by some standards but it was way to much. I am proud to say I quit cold and have never gone back. It has been over 20 years now.

Worst advice I ever gave: Move to Atlanta. Now my best friend lives elsewhere. It was good for her just bad for me. =(

This morning started out like all the other Saturdays with one exception. NO TV!!! Hot tea for me and my hunny, cereal for Brook, and of course I had to open the door for the cats that were beating on it. LOL. I had to take screen off of the door because the cats cannot reach the glass part above the door. Next I put clothes in dryer and washer, got dressed and off we went to visit my daughter. We only get 15 minutes a week so I only say hello to her and let Brook do all the talking. Today I had to give her the news of the money stealing. She made a point to tell Brook that what she did could cause her to go to jail. Brook did not like that.

For those who do not know, my daughter is in jail for drug charges. She recieved 6 months instead of the 30 years she could have recieved. She had already done 3 years in the federal system and is clean now. The judge was impressed with her prision record. She taught math classes to help other prisioners get their GED and had a perfect record there. She does show remorse for what she did and seems to be genuinely ready to start a new life. It will be hard for her with a drug conviction but she will have our support and love. She will be home for the holidays this year. The first one that she has spent with her daughter since she was 2.

Hopefully some time today I will get to do my walk. The weather looks like it may clear up.

Unchained Melody playing now so I am going to dance by myself. (he is at work)