Thursday, January 21, 2010

3 weeks!!

Where or where has the time gone? I cannot believe my little girl is 3 weeks old today! How life has changed in 3 short weeks. I feel like I have been in a bubble. I can count on one hand the number of times I have been out of the house & I feel completely out of touch with the real world, but that is okay because I am head over heels in love with Eliza.

Eliza Caroline has big feet like her mama and fingers like her daddy. She looks like daddy, but has mommy's nose and profile. She has long eyelashes and huge, almond shaped blue eyes. Her hair is light in front, dark in the back and show some hints of red. I can't believe we made her - she is perfection.

Eliza's favorite things at 3 weeks:1. being worn in the Moby by mommy or daddy2. Snuggling up3. Breastfeeding4. Sleeping on our chests5. being naked

Life is good but has been a blur of breastfeeding, diaper changes, babywearing, sleeping, rinse and repeat. BFing was really, really hard at first, got immensely better week 2 and week 3 is looking like there might be a supply issue as Eliza is still not up to birth weight. So for now, I visit the LC, stay in touch with the pedi, add pumping into the routine, take some fenugreek, go for frequent weight checks, supplement with pumped breast milk whenever possible and an oz of formula here and there. I HATE giving her the lousy ounce of formula and hope that she starts gaining ASAP so we can go back to exclusive breastfeeding. I know how irrational it sounds to hate giving her formula, I know it is helping her and not harming her, but it makes me feel like my body is broken all over again. LC suspects my supply issue could be due to the IVF and/or the postpartum hemorrhage. Hopefully it is easily fixable...

I know I owe you all my birth story, but I really want to do it justice so I am going to start working on it and post it when complete.

As if life has not been overwhelming enough with a newborn baby, we have decided now is the time to make the move back to Buffalo. I know - we are certifiable. Many of my long time readers know this has been on our radar for a loooong time and it has always been a long term goal. Having Eliza put things into perspective for us and when we looked at the big picture - budget, resources, Sean's job, our rental situation etc...it just made sense to pull the trigger and do it. So, we shuffle off to Buffalo on February 19th. Sean quit his job the day we decided and it has been wonderful having him home with us right now. He is handling all things related to the move and doing an amazing job with it - that is saying something coming from a control freak like me. Ask me if I feel the same when the major packing begins! We are kind of flying by the seat of our pants with the whole thing and it is SCARY! I know it is for the best though!

I am feeling good, but I had MAJOR weepyness the first week at home. I cried my eyes out when my mom left and when my inlaws were here, I was a hot mess. I even took the baby and hid in my bedroom one day. They were trying to be helpful, but the type A part of me could not handle it. The decision to move was not helping my emotional state either, but thankfully, the crying jags seem to have passed.

That is about all I have right now, but how about some more pics of the cutest baby I know???

26 comments:

Verity
said...

Oh wow! So so beautiful. I've never commented before but found your blog nearly a year ago when starting my own IVF adventure. Its not worked for us yet but reading your story and seeing the wonderful Eliza is keeping me strong! Congratulations - keep blogging please too!

Yay for moving back to Buffalo!! I must admit I'm a lottle (a little, but a lot) jealous!! I wish wecould be near our family :( I could go either way, but hubby says NEVER. Can you talk to him for me? :) I think it's awesome that you guys are just able to up and do it. Everyone who moves away, always ends up back in Buffalo!! When's it my turn?

I have been waiting on pins and needles!!! I understand time flys with a little one. I posted a quick birth story and then nothing for 3 months! I am so happy for you all and your Baby girls is absolutely adorable!

Look at your little girl! What a charmer she is! It seems like things are going well although I understand your weepiness after. It's a lot to cope with but it seems like you're handling it all better now - put it down to hormones. I can't believe you've just decided to move back to Buffalo!! Good for you to pull the trigger on that decision but wow lots of work for your family. I'm sure that it is the best place for you though and once you're there everything will be okay. good luck with all that and I can't wait to hear your birth story.

Awwwww, she is precious!! Congrats on making the move decision! At one time, didn't you think your DH's job could transfer or something? Hope bf'ing gets easier soon!! Looking forward to the birth story and more cute baby pics! :)

My little girl is one month tomorrow, and I had the same BFing issues as you... she lost 14oz the first 24 hours (more than 10% birth weight), and we had to supplement 0.5 oz of formula at each feeding. Ped wanted 1 oz, but I pushed for only .5. I was weepy every night for the exact same reasons - felt I was not producing, inadequate, etc. etc. I hated each and every oz of formula we gave her. It took her several weeks to gain more than an oz, and it was very disheartening, but she finally started gaining. Now we (DH) does one bottle of formula at night. Actually helps her sleep a little longer, gives DH a chance to do feedings, and me a chance to pump. I don't mind the formula now that she's gaining weight, and I like that I get little break.

Then last week I got mastitis, and just as that cleared up, I got a blocked duct in the other breast. Both were extremely painful, and you have to nurse through the pain. I hope you don't get any of those things, very difficult to deal with. But if you do... just remember it does go away with antibiotics, heat compresses and massage.

Oh my goodness, she's beautiful! So wonderful to hear you're doing so well, and to see her doing so wonderfully. She certainly doesn't look like she's too scrawny - beautiful chubby cheeks! Thank you for sharing the pictures - can't wait for her birth story!!!

She is just perfect!!! I am so happy for you. Welcome to Mommyhood, enjoy every second!! I know what a long road this has been for you, and I'm so happy it ends with your sweet little Snowbaby in your arms!!

Welcome back! Since no one else is saying it, I call bulls*#t on ivf affecting breastfeeding. That is some wierd bias of the lc's. Plenty of women who are super fertile have trouble breastfeeding, and plenty of women who go through ivfhave no trouble with it. Don't let psuedo science shame you!

I'm not even sure who's blog I hopped over from, but your story is amazing!!! I am so very happy for you.

My first-born, Mary Catherine, also struggled with weight in the beginning, and I too had to supplement with formula. But in then end it worked out...and I was able to drop the formula all together.

Just wanted you to know that we too suffer from male-factor infertility. Mary Catherine is our in vitro baby and Benjamin is what the RE calls "our bonus baby" meaning he was a spontaneous pregnancy. Something that I was told would never happen without IVF/ICSI b/c we had less than a 1% chance of conceiving on our own.

Well, guess what? We did it again. Expecting Baby #3 in late July (currently 14 weeks pregnant)...bonus #2 you could say!!! And while I know our journey is not common, it is possible to conceive on your own (even with male-factor) after having a successful IVF/ICSI pregnancy and delivery.

Wishing you all the best with your sweet bundle of joy and your move to Buffalo. Feel free to drop by my blog (I have my email address linked) if you have any other BF/pumping questions.

Congrats your sweet girl!! I came over from the bump. We had the same supply issues w/dd and ended up supplementing. I bfought it at first but realized it was what was best for her. And in the end it actually was best for all of us. Hubby was able to help with feedings and bond with her. And she got used taking formula of breast milk from a bottle so the transition to daycare was easier too. And when it came time to wean, it was really smooth.Stick with it and it will get better!

About Me

I am Emily. I will be 37 next month. I am a MOM to 3 little ones.
I am a consultant with R+F and I LOVE my job!
I am a PTA volunteer & preschool parent board member.
Sean is 41 - he is the most easy going, laid back, supportive man I have ever known.
We struggled with infertility for 5 years We have severe Male Factor Infertility. IVF/ICSI.
We had 3 failed fresh IVF cycles and FET was our miracle. Our snowbaby was born on December 31, 2009!
We have had 2 surprise pregnancies since and have another daughter and a son.
I've had an induction, a surprise home birth and a water birth.
We are Buffalo born & bred.
We Love the Buffalo Bills & Sabres - we are glutton for punishment :)
We are homebodies.
I am one of the most emotional people you will ever meet.
I am a very positive person.
I am very close to my mom.
Family is everything to us.
I am an only child with 6 half brothers & sisters.
Sean is the baby of 5.
Sean is the "wee yank" - the only sibling to be born in America & not Ireland.
I'm a little bit of everything - mostly Italian.
We love to travel.
We love movies.
We love going out to eat.
I love to read.