"Change! Change! Change you stupid traffic light! I demand that you change! I'll start a trade war right this minute! I'll get the UN involved if you don't cha- there it goes! Hahaha, that traffic light is so scared of me! I'm da man! I'm da boss! Booya, you stupid traffic light, I bet I made you wet your pants! I bet you're shaking with fear... HEY YOU FUCKER I DIDN'T GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO TURN RED AGAIN!"

Polly Toynbee is basically a British Margo Kingston with a slightly better grasp of grammar and punctuation. I picture her staggering around the square with a trolley full of cans and a bottle of cider in her hand, shouting at the pigeons.

Europe is doomed. In 2050, the median age will be 50. Britain and Ireland are the EU states with the greatest opportunities (due to cultural, institutional, and linguistic similarities) to avoid the collapse-by-aging into irrelevance by attaching themselves closely to the United States.

If they attach to Paris and Berlin, they attach themselves to the dying. Attached to the U.S., they'd have attached themselves to the living. Influence and power in the future depends on treating the Channel as wider than the Atlantic.

In "Love Actually," Prime Minister Hugh Grant tells off the U.S. because the president -- a cross between Clinton's proclivities and Bush's politics -- makes a pass at the PM's tea girl, who he fancies for himself.

It's a fun movie if you like fluff. Sweet fluff. And Liam Neeson as world's most eligible widower with world's cutest stepson.