Back When I Was Good at Making God Behave I Was Making Good Money – Julie

Back when I was good at making God behave I was a pharmaceutical salesperson making over $90,000 a year. I had no credit card debt and purchased a home that I could easily afford. I also had $150,000 in my 401k and was and was starting to put money in a Roth IRA.

I got married and had a reverse pre nup that my husband requested to protect my assets as my husband owed money to the IRS. I was 37 and anxious to start a family. I got pregnant and had a stillborn son.

I went back to work and got pregnant again and had another son born 13 weeks premature. He had a horrible stay in the hospital and has severe brain damage. He is multiply impaired and I am going to dedicate my life to his care.

While all this was happening my husband had taken out credit cards with high limits in my name that we were living off of. I signed all the applications. My husband “does deals” and has done very well in the past. I knew when I married him we would be up and down and I thought I could handle him not having a steady paycheck. He got one deal closed where he made $400,00 that he refused to pay off our credit card bills saying we needed to save the money.

We bought tvs, washing machine and dryer all on credit. Those have defaulted. We have $60,00 in credit card debts and I now have 3 mortgages on my home. The 3rd mortgage was a home repair loan and it has expired.

I never once paid late but I now have a credit score of 420 and they won’t refinance. They have told me to take the $40,00 that I owe to another bank to refinance. They are now sending me letters about being in default.

I am 1 month behind on my first mortgage and they have reported me late the past 2 months. Because I took $50,000 out of my 401k a couple of years ago I now owe the IRS $8,000. I am currently paying them $400,00 per month. I have worked out deals with my creditors where they waived late fees and gave me low intrest rates. I have been paying as agreed for over 1 year.

My credit score is still so low (420) that I don’t see that it is helping me. They said my credit report would show closed by customer paying as agreed. The balances are barely moving at all and now that I am paying the IRS I have no extra money. I cannot afford to pay my credit cards like I have been.

I currently receive $3000 a month from social security because I am disabled from depression. I also get $1500 a month from Cigna because I get long term disability from Pfizer. I was already on my knees from having a child die and then one that is disabled.

My husband keeps saying he is going to get us out and not to worry but I have learned that it is up to me. The house and the credit cards are in my name. To make matters worse I have two story house and my son has cerebrel palsy and can’t turn over at 3 much less walk up stairs. I will eventually have to get a one story house or continue to carry him up the stairs. I have such severe depression from the turn my life has taken that to add on the financial burden is just too much,

Going back to work wouldn’t help because I would lose the long term disability and social security will pay you for 9 months while you see if you can go back to work but any school that could take my son would be thousands due to his level of care. I don’t trust anyone to take care of him like me. He is 3 years old and 20 pounds and can’t tell me if someone doesn’t treat him right.

Help me. I have never been in such a fiery trial in all my life. Peopel that judge people for taking bankruptcy should hope lightening doesn’t strike them. I did everything right and life just happened to me.

Julie”

The Answer

Dear Julie,

Wow, that’s a lot to go through.

I’m not clear after reading your story a couple of times, did you already file bankruptcy?

Children with disabilities are entitled to a free education. Contact your local Educational Service Center to inquire about services available in your area. At the very least, your son will have a little time surrounded by other children & you will get a little respite from the constant care. There are very good preschools out there with caring and knowledgeable staff to enhance your son’s quality of life. I know because I am an Early Educator for the Handicapped. I love the children and the typical children in my center are very empathetic and caring as well.Michelle

Michelle

Children with disabilities are entitled to a free education. Contact your local Educational Service Center to inquire about services available in your area. At the very least, your son will have a little time surrounded by other children & you will get a little respite from the constant care. There are very good preschools out there with caring and knowledgeable staff to enhance your son’s quality of life. I know because I am an Early Educator for the Handicapped. I love the children and the typical children in my center are very empathetic and caring as well. Michelle

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