Senior Moments: Looking at what matters as Mom turns 98

“Maybe this will be my last birthday,” Mom said when she turned 94. “That would be OK,” she added wistfully. The youngest of eight children, all gone now, Mom hadn’t expected to live so long.

As her 98th birthday approaches (Tuesday), I sense she is having renewed misgivings about her longevity. I asked her the same question I did four years ago. “What’s the secret of living so long?” And she gave me the same answer:

“I just didn’t die.”

Then she added a question of her own.

“What difference did it make?”

“Mom, let’s look at what you would have missed if you hadn’t had the last four years.”

Topping the list would be a reunion with her childhood best friend. Last year on Mom’s 97th birthday, readers helped me find Betty, whom Mom hadn’t seen in 70-some years. Not only did she call Mom on her birthday, but her daughter brought her from Phoenix to visit Mom in Los Angeles. And they have been telephone buddies ever since, reliving the past and sharing an ever increasingly challenging present.

In fact, the years since Mom was 94 — which suddenly seems so young — also brought surprise visits from nieces and nephews from other parts of the country who had lost touch. One found me on Facebook, two others tracked me down on their own, and I became the conduit to their beloved Aunt Jean. Watching them love my mother has enriched my life.

On the other hand, this birthday — well, technically the day after — is also the one-year anniversary of the day Mom fell and broke her second hip. It’s been a tough year of recovery and adjustment to a life of limited mobility. It was also a year that was softened by rah-rah calls, cards, and visits from Betty and all the other cheerleaders who have surfaced along the way.

So, that’s the difference it made, Mom. Reuniting with people who love you. Happy birthday from all of us.