Justified 3.12: “Do I strike you in any way as a Van Halen fan?”

The penultimate episode of Justified season 3. Sh*t’s getting real now. This involves a naked, chained-up Quarles popping Oxy with the hookers Boyd left to keep an eye on him. Because that can’t possibly backfire. Meanwhile, Boyd is planning how he’ll divvy up the Bennett money with his crew. Counting chickens, Boyd, counting chickens.

Boyd and Dickie Bennett face off. It’s a great moment. Deadly silent and tense until Boyd blows up and chokes Dickie out with a trash bag. The non-expression on Ava’s face is the best part. And it is ultimately Ava who calms Boyd down and saved Dickie. For now. His clock is steadily winding down. 4…3…

Enter Raylan and his hat. That’s how you know he’s serious. He’s been hatless for a little while lately but the hat is back. He’s tracking down Quarles, who is busy getting high with the hookers. They’re using a shotgun to smoke up. You can use a shotgun…? You know what, better off not understanding how that works. Quarles, I think, fakes being stoned more than he actually is. The minute the hookers are distracted with being bratty to the guy in charge of “babysitting” Quarles, Quarles gets the drop on them.

What happened with Arlo being crazy? He seems fine now.

Boyd & Co. are planning on robbing the bank where Limehouse has the Bennett money stashed. Nice symmetry—we first met Boyd when he was engineering a bank robbery (by way of a church bombing).

So Quarles has escaped. Because, of course.

Ava is casing the bank and Raylan hooks up with State Trooper Tom outside. I hope Boyd has a better plan than this appears to be so far because everyone knows what he’s doing.

Winn Duffy and Boyd meet face to face. Boyd’s reaction to Duffy insulting Harlan is CLASSIC. Everyone underestimates Boyd because he’s from the backwoods and seems like a hick and also wears a pea coat. But the way he looks at Duffy when he dismisses Duffy’s insult—he’s almost amused. Because short of Raylan, Boyd is pretty much the smartest man in every room he’s ever been in.

Duffy describing Quarles’ “big stupid baby head” cracks my sh*t up.

Boyd’s evolving plan involves setting up a car bomb for Quarles, who is offering to work for Limehouse. Quarles is just trying to save his skin at this point, posturing and pride be-damned. Limehouse expects Boyd to use his previous MO of blowing something up to distract emergency services before robbing the bank and sends Quarles to intercept the money once Boyd has it.

Oh THERE’S Arlo being crazy again, confusing Boyd with Raylan when Boyd tells him to go home instead of participating in the bank robbery. Quarles is headed to the Gallatin Bank, too, to wait for Boyd. So far he’s playing into Boyd’s trap by calling up Duffy for help.Limehouse is making…sausage?...which is not creepy at all when Raylan visits him. Limehouse always seems to be chopping and/or grinding up meat whenever people come to talk to him. Secret’s in the sauce!

So Limehouse has manipulated Boyd and Quarles into going to the Gallatin Bank at the same time so that they can either kill each other or Raylan can arrest them all, thus clearing the way for Limehouse. But Raylan doesn’t think the money is actually there because the bank has been robbed too many times in the past. Raylan threatens the constant presence of federal agents searching for the money until he gets it. Check.

Dickie: [on learning they’re off to rob the bank] All right—there’s a little bit of good news right there!Boyd: You understand the less I hear from you, the better.Dickie: …THE DIALOGUE.

Twist! Instead of outlining his plan Boyd gets the drop on Errol and Dickie—he knows he’s being set up. Boyd also knows there’s no money at the bank. Errol’s been working for Limehouse all along, trying to ensure Boyd went after the Gallatin Bank and ended up in custody. So far, only Dickie and Quarles have fallen for the Gallatin Bank story. Sounds about right.

Arlo hallucinates the late Aunt Helen—he’s off his meds and the fake Aunt Helen is encouraging him to “take care of business”. Which means pulling a gun on Ava. Boyd goes to check on her, concerned that she’s not answering her phone.

The state troopers are getting ready to bust the bank robbery. Well, hopefully they get Quarles anyway.

Dickie gets the drop on Johnny Crowder. With a gun to his head, Errol takes off with Dickie in search of the money. They’re being watch by State Trooper Tom’s guys and Limehouse’s guys. Limehouse calls Raylan. This is going to be such a cock-up.

At the Givens house, Boyd gets Ava out of the basement, where Arlo locked her up. Johnny tells Boyd Errol and Dickie went after the money, which is in Lexington with Loretta (the kid Mags took in last season and whom Raylan asked about the money first thing earlier this season—Raylan always knows). Events are spiraling out of control.

Dickie stuff Errol into the trunk of the car. Probably shouldn’t be funny, but kind of is. Dickie walks straight into Raylan waiting for him at Loretta’s. Raylan goads Dickie into drawing on him and Raylan shoots him (non-fatal). Limehouse is there, naturally.

So Mags left the money to Loretta, and Raylan agreed with Limehouse to respect that, since Limehouse warned Raylan about Dickie. Loretta is the proud owner of $3.2 million. She’ll probably be Mags Bennett 2.0 in twenty years.

Quarles is doing more drugs. How much can he do before he keels over and dies? The weight of a small pony? Winn Duffy bossing around Quarles is surreal. Limehouse is still trying to get rid of Boyd and sends Quarles after him.

State Trooper Tom and Raylan are heading for the Crowder bar, where Quarles has Boyd cornered. And Duffy has just double-crossed Boyd, and is also on-site. Boyd confronts Quarles, and Duffy sets off his car bomb. Boyd is knocked out by the concussion and Quarles is on fire.

NOOOO STATE TROOPER TOM!

Quarles managed to put himself out and get away after shooting State Trooper Tom. So that’s Dickie out of the game, Limehouse and Duffy still pulling strings, Quarles on the loose and Boyd unconscious with Raylan trying to pick up the pieces.