Happy Birthday to Clara Cowell, a 102-year-old English woman that the Surgeon General probably doesn't want you to hear about. You see, Cowell has been smoking for about 82 of those years, and she's in damn good health.

Cowell first lit a cigarette in 1931, and has smoked two or three a day since. Her daughter Lynda Fowler (which I almost typed as "Lila Fowler") said "The secret to mum's long life is a cigarette and a cup of tea with whisky. That and hard work and poverty. She's an inspiration."

The hard work through poverty is an inspiration, but you might question the boozy tea and smokes. Although, who are we to argue with facts, and the fact is that Cowell is 102-years-old, and we're not. So, uh, smokes if you got 'em? I will say that one of my grandmothers drank, smoked, and ate like shit well into her 90s. Genetics has a lot to do with it, but these women are definitely very lucky exceptions.

That said, Cowell gave up smoking two weeks before her 102nd birthday, and she's not stopping for her health. She's calling it quits because her family is afraid she'll ash on something and burn the house down. Cowell lives independently in a housing complex with on-site care staff, so someone isn't with her at all times. It's OK, though, Cowell still has some fun — she spent her 102nd birthday partying at a pub. Get it, girl.