I started off the competition strong and hope to continue. Today I wake up and continue my routine.

4:20am the alarm goes off.4:22am get in the shower. 4:35am get dressed, put coffee on and begin meditation.4:55am finish meditation and walk downstairs to get on the bus.

The day begins. It is still dark and and I am unfamiliar with the land. Unsure as to where exactly we are in the city of LA and where we are going this is all still a mystery. We are whisked of to hair and make up and then rushed to wait.

When the time to cook comes, the theme flashes on the screen 'Happy Holidays' - fitting as it is in the middle of September and we are all sweating balls off. Chef Naomi Pomeroy walks out on stage. I have to admit that I am not as familiar with her as I would like to be, however, after a quick chat with Tristen and Marcus I am brought up to speed.

The essence of her cuisine is; Bold, Delicious, Gritty. We are tasked with making a chicken curry, a dish that represents Marcus's holiday experience. He challenges us to cook a 'festive fau.' He demonstrates a chicken curry with chicken oyster and actual oysters. He keeps suggesting that we cook with the humble part of the bird... the dirt, the liver, the heart, the innards.

To be honest, this is something that I am not too familiar with. I don't love innards... I wish I did, it would make me feel cool, but the reality is that I don't really enjoy the taste.

Ok, so time goes on and the challenge begins, I am rocking and rolling. Feeling REALLY good about the way things are going. I am making a seared squab breast with a garnish of confit squab, chicken liver, heart, necks, preserved lemon, apple and other wonderful things.

Time ticks down and Marcus chooses my spoon! I am proud and excited. But horrified as I look to see my spoon is incomplete. I forgot the garnish. Fuck.

The spoons are being tasted by Chef Pomeroy and the results are close. Ludo's team gets picked first. Anthony team gets picked second.

Are you kidding? Me vs. Nigella's team? Big shot to the ego. Well... as it turns out everything is OK and we are safe. But this was way too close for comfort. It is a wake up call that I really need focus, dot my i's and cross my t's.

The individual challenge is now my time to shine. Although my family didn't eat duck often, to me it represents the holidays. I decide to draw from my past experience at Bouley and incorporate an Apple Rosemary puree that is emulsified with brown butter. It rocks and pairs perfectly with the duck.

The comments come in. Anthony Bourdain says 'This is a terrific spoon with a huge chunk of sage that blew out the whole spoon' WHAT!? There was no sage on the dish! #NoSage.

Marcus compliments my aggressive seasoning. Mission accomplished.

Fortunately for me the dish earned me one gold star from my mentor Marcus! I can't say how good it feels to get the recognition of my mentor. This means more than a gold star, but safety. As the field narrows, this provides me security if our team falters on a team challenge or if I stumble on an individual challenge. It is a good day.

I am convinced that my positive energy, focus and love for the food is making a difference in this competition. It is an affirmation that I will continue to do well if I put my heart and soul into every bite.

Unfortunately, my teammate Joe got a few red stars and will be going into the taste off. The taste off is hardcore. It is really intense as everyone is watching you, gazing down at you and yelling. The way that it is edited on TV is far from what it is actually like. The cut out the sound from our mic's. I wish it was uncut. The energy is real.

In the thunder dome Joe worked hard, but a few missteps made his dish the weakest and unfortunately he will be going home. Joe is a fighter, a great man, father and friend. His energy and enthusiasm is unparalleled and I am happy to have cooked along side him.

I retreat back to the hotel smiling. However, now there are only two of us on Team Marcus. A drastic change from starting off so strong. Tristen is my biggest competition and now we are going head to head every day. We are a team and will continue to operate that way until it is the finals. But now holding the most gold stars in the competition, I can sleep well tonight.

Day 3. Auditions are over and everything is real. The stakes are real, the competition is real and I can feel the pressure. Unaware what the day will bring I begin to set my routine in motion. A 4am wake up with a brief stretch, and then I put the coffee on, jump in the shower, meditate and get ready to head to the set.

The day feels good, the sun is not up yet, and the world is quiet. The calm California breeze whispers calming words to me. We load up into the van and head off.

We progress through the usual hair and make-up routine. Only this time two contestants faces have been removed from the board. I sit as they spray my hair with texture leaving it as natural as possible. I am grateful. We are then moved back to the holding room. It is uncomfortable. No couches, only fold out chairs and picnic tables. The floor is concrete, the bathrooms are locked and the lights fluorescent. I retreat back to my meditation space… a yoga mat that I found the day before.

Time for action. We silently navigate through the airplane hangar, in which Howard Hughes plane was built and make our way to set. It is time to cook…or wait. The 3000 lights are adjusted once again and the adrenaline builds. Our feet are marked and we are ushered back stage. Let me cook! After waiting and waiting, we are queued to enter the set. We take our marks and the mentors walk out to our applause.

Bourdain stands tall and announces the challenge. This week the judge is a friend of his, he says, my mind skips and immediately thinks Eric Ripert. “The challenge… Under The Sea” my thoughts are affirmed… “with guest mentor Eric Ripert.” My mind starts spinning and I begin digging for all of my favorite fish recipes. What can I cook that will live up to this man’s expectation? He is a legend, unparalleled, talented, successful, kind, cool, French!

Marcus walks to the team and begins to discuss his take on the challenge – fish and shellfish. He prepares what he would do in our situations. Cured Hamachi, apples, corn it is a magical plate full of inspiration. His guidance in and direction are my priority. I figure if I can execute his vision with my twist, we will win, he will like me and I’ll probably get to stick around.

We are provided a cart of beautiful Hamachi, clams, oysters, black cod, fish eggs, and a bounty from the sea. It is full of life and the quality is top notch. At this point it is my job to let the ingredients shine and stay out of their way.

The cook begins and fly’s by. I continually ask Marcus to taste, we adjust seasonings working on the pillars of what makes a great dish – SALT, ACID, SPICE, TEXTURE!

A corn and uni puree sits on the bottom of the spoon, cured Hamachi sits on top whimsically decorated with pickled romanesco, charred corn, apple, preserved lemon, clam, and togarishi. The dish is harmonious and hits all the notes.

I am honored that Marcus chooses to pick my dish, my listening has paid off. Time to hear what Chef Ripert thinks. It is pretty wild to be cooking for such a master, I cannot express the nerves, and my heart beat grows. I may appear calm, but on the inside the pressure is immense. After running through the dishes, he chooses mine. MINE. I can finally take a breath. The weight has lifted, my mind immediately moves to the next challenge. What do I cook? But before that, the worst spoon.

This is when tempers erupt, it seems as though tension has been brewing on Nigellas team from the start. I try to stay out of it, but at this point everyone knows. When the team members are asked to choose who they would eliminate it gets ugly. Lindsey throws down. She speaks her mind in an articulate way. I don’t blame her. When you are fighting for your life on the show you do what you gotta do. Lindsay is a great person and a great competitor, I am happy that our paths crossed. She will do great things.

As we move to the master class I am thrilled. Eric Ripert shows us the beauty of simplicity through ceviche. His actions are precise, his movements have purpose, he moves with grace. He creates a progression of ceviche that moves from the simple South American to an Asian inspired umami bomb. As the class wraps up, it is time to put my game face on. I want a gold star. I want to win.

The time begins for the individual cook and I am so excited. I know the judges will love my dish. My sauce is a favorite from my NYC cook days. It is like the ocean and herbs – perfect for the challenge. Having Ripert in the kitchen is quite a help. We bounce ideas around and he helps me refine the flavors.

Time begins to tick and I am behind. Although my dish is simple, it is taking a long time; the knife work is time consuming and so is making the herb oils. The adrenaline begins to pump even more as I see 10 min remain and my dish is nowhere near complete. Time to hustle. With some magic, I pull it off and I am thrilled at the final product I have created.

Seared cod, ocean herbal broth, brunoises of spiced clam and fennel. It is well balanced, beautiful and a fantastic representation of the sea. Judgment time.

Standing and listening to the judges is a unique experience, I am always quite relaxed until the person before my dish. Then my heart starts to pound. The judges taste my dish and are not as impressed as I was hoping they would be. Ludo seems pretty fond of it. I knew he would appreciate the nuance.

As we enter the stage for judgment, I feel confident. Rightfully so, I start off with a bang. Ludo gives me a gold star. I am safe this week. Jen and Jake, my teammate goes into the taste off. ..

The taste off is intense and to be honest something I never want to go through. We are yelling at him directing him and trying to help him navigate the kitchen from a far. We tried our hardest, but in the end it was not enough. Jen beat Jake out… team Marcus is down to 3. One less person but in my mind, one less buffer in case we make a mistake. The competition just got real.

I made it. My dream is coming true before my very eyes. I am deeply touched by love and support that surrounds my experience thus far, and it is only beginning. So after a sleepless first night, I am excited to see what the new day, the first day brings. I enter the hair and makeup trailer, our pictures are posted all over the wall. Those who don’t make it are immediately taken down. A firm reminder of why we are here and that only one will last. It feels as though I am in the hunger games, bizarre but oddly fun. As time passes, the first challenge arrives. Who will go home?

Walking out onto the stage, we take our marks as all 3,000 lights are perfectly positioned to capture our frame. Camera men surround the set, the cameras hang from above and set from below, this is all too cool. An entire crew of nearly 200 people are hear to capture our every move and every word. The magic of being on set has taken a hold and the mentors walk onto stage. Anthony, Marcus, Ludo and Nigella gaze back at the 16 of us. We smile but know that two contestants will be gone shortly. After a brief intro, he announces the challenge. CHILDHOOD. Chef Stephanie Izard walks out to our applause. She is a legendary woman, chef and business person. To cook for her is truly an honor. Knowing her style at the Girl and The Goat in Chicago, my mind beings to to tick. What will I make?

Childhood. How fitting for our first challenge. An opportunity to represent ourselves in whichever light we choose.

Team Challenge - This is the first team challenge. Each team cooks their own version of a dish that their mentor selects. The mentor chooses one team members spoon to represent the team. The guest judge picks the best and worst spoon. The worst spoon goes home. The best wins a class with the guest mentor.

Team Marcus is tasked with making our own version of Chicken Curry. ‘Chicken curry? I love chicken curry’ I think. My mind begins to race, how will mine be different. It is time to follow my instinct, lucky for me curry is familiar.

Cooking with Marcus is nothing less than wild. His passion radiates through. He wants to win just as bad as we do. He tastes, he smells, he instructs and yells at times. I take this as a once in a life time learning opportunity. Who knows how long I will be around. He critiques my curry saying that there is too much Kaffir lime leaf in it. We work to balance the flavor. I am confident that I made the right choice. We are working as a team, sharing stocks, sauces, ingredients and garnishes, doing whatever we can to ensure that we go to the end as a unit.

It is amazing how quick the time goes. Really it flies by, so it must mean that I am having fun right? Right. As the time ticks down, Marcus can’t decide if he will choose between Tristen or me. He goes with Tristen.

I am OK with it. It is a team challenge and although I would have liked to represent the team, many of my components were used in Tristen’s dish. My stock, my sauce, it was truly a collaboration.

Judgment has arrived. I am sweating bullets. Although I am not worried about going home at this point, there are weaker cooks on my team, it is always a possibility, not one that I want to dwell on. I see her hand reach for the tile indicating out spoon and my heart beat begins to slow, knowing that I am safe and our team will live another day.

With the first challenge behind me, my perspective has changed. My competitive nature has kicked in. This is something that I want to win. Something that I will need to fight for. Something that can and will change my life.

I retreat back to the hotel with the rest of the cast. The drive is filled with jovial conversation, all of us grateful to still be around. As we make our way back to our new home at an airport hotel, I can only think of one thing. Winning.

I go upstairs, open my notebook, favorite cookbooks and begin studying. The journey has only just begun.

Tomorrow I will be cooking for a legend. I know it. Under The Sea, I hope my dreams tonight take me there.

Pics From My Life

Make Thai at home! Check out this quick, easy, refreshing salad for the warmer weather! Shaved papaya, carrot, herbs, chili and peanuts - enjoy! #gimmethegreens
@joshuahmelnick with the fire 🎥

20 years ago I asked for an older brother... I got younger sister... and I couldn't be happier. I am so grateful to have such a kind, intelligent, empathetic and evolved little sister to walk through life with. Thank you Solina for inspiring me to continually grow, reflect, and challenge myself. I am so proud of who you are and the light you bring to the world ✨#nationalsiblingday

Not so long ago, I had the privilege of seeing Concern’s work first hand in Haiti. As an advocate and strong believer in healthy eating and living, I encourage you to join them on April 8 in Central Park for a 4 mile run. They are doing life-saving work in places like South Sudan, Somalia and Kenya- and are currently one of the leading humanitarian agencies responding to the food crisis. It’s an important cause. Do good, join now bit.ly/spring-run

I am excited and honored to team up with @LonelyWhale and @Thrive for a content series on the WONDER of our environment. Stoked to be in such good company with @AdrianGrenier, @SusanRockefeller, and Asher Jay (@earthheiress) - click the link in my bio for our pieces! #strawlessocean #world #greengabe #explore #adventure

Time to cook! Grilled avocado, caramelized onion, and pumpkin seed arugula pesto. Learn how to make one of my faves - check it out and let me know what you think

Charred spring onion, lemon and local honey. Simple, delicious and great for allergies and health - onion and local honey is power combo 🍯 Try it out yourself; Quarter your onions, drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with salt. Grill on each side till golden and then finish with a squeeze of lemon and zest. Drizzle with honey or put a swoosh on the plate to dip into! I also took some of the onion greens and sliced them for a nice pop of green 🌱

Sunny Salad Days 🌱 butter lettuce cups with a salad of cherry tomato, avocado, tree nut cheese, tangerine, red onion and cilantro. Video and recipe coming soon. What kind of food do you all want to see!? Let me know - and I'll make it happen!

Celery salad time! 🌱#gimmethegreens Get in the kitchen and whip it up yourself! Tell me what ya thank and what dishes you want to see! And if you have a craving come try it at @thelittlebeet in a week!
Shoutout to @thecameracartelofficial for the shots and edit

Woke up... did some yoga + fresh fruit, yogurt and granola 🌱

Time to go green 🌱About to drop some veggie vibes for y'all to make! #gimmethegreens in the interim... I'm going to keep curing bunches of kale

Feelin' green? How about a chickpea Ceasar salad? Avocado, seeds, parm... Life is good - come on in!