Massachusetts Court officials released a letter that former New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez wrote to his fiancée, Shayanna Jenkins, before he committed suicide April 19:

It reads:

Shay,

You have always been my soul-mate and I want you to love life and know I’m always with you. I told you what was coming indirectly! I love you so much and know you are an angel – literally! We split into two to come change the world! Your characteristics is that of a true angel and the definition of God’s love! Tell my story fully but never think anything besides how much I love you. This was the Supreme’s, the Almighty’s plan, not mine! I love you! Let (redacted) know how much I love her! Look after (redacted) and (redacted) for me – they are my boys (you’re rich). I knew I loved you = Savage Garden

A judge ordered that the suicide notes be turned over to Hernandez’s family on April 24.

Hernandez had been serving a life sentence without the possibility of parole for the 2013 murder of Odin Lloyd. He was found guilty in April 2015 of first-degree murder in the death of Lloyd two years prior. Lloyd, a former friend who dated the sister of Jenkins, was shot several times by the same kind of gun security footage showed Hernandez possessed.

Days before his death at the age of 27, Hernandez was found not guilty for the double murder of two men on a Boston street in 2012.

Hernandez, who grew up in Bristol, Conn, played with the Patriots from 2010-2012.