July 06, 2007

Off to School - Part 3.

Day 3 Monday: We went at 10 am. Ashu started crying as soon as I left the school. I roamed around for a couple of hours and went to pick her up at 12.30. She bawled as soon as she she saw me. Miss. Hooley told me that she wanted to be carried all the time and cried whenever she left her down. I came home and seriously contemplated quitting. The pouring rain every day does nt help much.

Day 4 Tuesday: Good news at last. Though she cried when I left her, it seems she stopped in 15 minutes and started playing. She had bombarded Miss Hooley with questions, "whats this, what that" looking at all the toys and generally had a good time. She cried when I went but it was not the high pitch cry like the previous times.

Day 5 Wednesday: Ashu got up and declared "No school". I said ok but went on packing her bag. She saw me packing and started crying! I gave an exasperated look at Hd and he volunteered to drop her. Ashu thought that Appa is at last taking her to show his office and happily went with him. Hd told me that "Caesar" would have been proud of her for the look she gave him at the school entrance. Et tu, Brutus? Miss. Hooley told me that she settled down in 5 minutes and started playing. Relief! That day was the first time I got some home alone time. I did what any self respecting woman would do. I removed unwanted body hair and took a long shower! When I went to pick her up two hours later in the pouring rain and howling wind with a broken umbrella, she gave a fake cry. I was never so happy to hear her fake cry!

After the first day of school, I felt as if my child's spirit has been broken. She was unusually quiet, was nt clingy, played and talked with herself sitting in a corner, had a tired face and cried in her sleep asking for me. That's how I used to feel when I was young and got into trouble and my father hit me while my mom watched helplessly. Lonely, quiet, betrayed, emotionally drained,... I could nt bear to look at Ashu. She looked like a prisoner out of the jail after serving a long sentence. I know I was over reacting but that's how I felt and no point in denying that. Life goes on and I ll always remember that day as the day the umbilical cord was completely severed. By me.The end. (Or is it the beginning?)

13 comments:

Boo, from my experience, Toddler settled down soon on the days she was dropped by hubby than on the days she was dropped by me. So I took full advantage of it, "No, you have to drop her, the poor thing cries for hours together if I drop her". About the crying part, ditto on that.

I think it's tougher on us than the kids. My daughter is doing a shade better as well but still cries and doesn't eat a bite while she's there :( I've got to start leaving her for full day (as opposed to the 3 hrs now) starting Monday and boy am i dreading it! I felt the same way about her disposition and it worried me too. Hang in there! That's what i tell myself.

15 yrs down the line more than anyone ashu is going to be so embarassed that you removed bodily hair and took a long shower when she went off to school...save the intimate stuff boo..no one wants to hear it except perverts.