so now i'm 12 years old. i have a size DD boobs and every boy wants a piece of me. Trouble is, i'm in love with my best friend Amy. i love women because i see that they need a hero. These tortured young girls, and Amy was a daughter of a Shriner... a gang of its own. We were supposed to go to the Shriners rodeo together to help her father sell beverages out of the beverage cart. We were not going to be paid, but it was exciting to have a job at only 12 years old, and we were told we could go to the after party afterwards and meet Rodeo Romeo and all the other Shriners. It was so exciting. We worked all night and flirted with the Italian boys who were there. They told us we were hot and asked us if we wanted to work for some real money. They said if we gave a few blow jobs throughout the night, we would be paid large amounts of money--- thousands of dollars, and they would buy us alcohol and drugs like the adults had in the adult room. We were in the kids room. Every time Amy and i gave a blow job, Rodeo Romeo (this charming 17 year old pimp), we were brought alcohol and drugs and money. We became drunker and higher and richer as the night went on. There were literally thousands of dollars in front of us. We had never seen money and fame like that.

Oh yeah, in the room, before we became whores for the Shriner gang, the mafia boys there (CJ and Cappy) told us they thought we were lesbians. They also kept saying how EASY Catholic girls were. I said that most Catholic girls i knew were too afraid to be badass like Amy and i. They asked me if i had a Godmother. I said, "yeah, all Catholics have godparents" True, they told me, but NOT all Catholic girls got diamond rings from their Godmother. I asked them how they knew i had a ring or why it made any difference. They said they just knew, and the ring made a BIG difference. Amy and i did not want anyone thinking we were dykes, cuz the truth was, we were in love with eachother. She was a year older than me and had a twin sister, but her sister was not as Voluptuous as Amy and i. She still looked too much like a little girl. I always wanted a twin... a soul mate, someone who could see that i was not the evil little kid that everyone made me out to be. But when the gang came to us to propose our becoming whores for them, they explained to us that sex was nothing to be ashamed of. Sex was power. We would have poer over the men, taking their money all over a little blow job.

We listened to 94.5 WZOU (now known as Jammin 94.5) all night in the kids room as the adults partied with eachother. We partied and flirted and made some whore money. We listened to NWA's album Niggaz4Life, where were were instructed on how exactly to give a proper blow job."WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO WITH IT?" "DON'T MATTER, JUST DON'T BITE IT"What about my braces?Be careful, you dont wanna get their hair caught in there. Amy and i thought we were the coolest girls on the planet. We were raking in money and the STAR of the Rodeo as the one paying us and making us feel so good.

Then, suddenly, it was the next day. "We must have been so drunk" we said to eachother with smiles on our faces, even though we woke up in a barn stable dirty, sore and covered in horse shit""oh my GOD! it must have been a crazy night"Didn't we make some money or something? "I think so, lets go look for it"We managed to pick our sore beaten bodies up off the floor of the stable. This was the cost of fame and fun, and we were willing to endure it. Although how did we end up in the dirt in a stable? We could not remember.We found our ways back into the Shriner Auditorium, but everyone was gone. The Rodeo had moved on, and the party was long over. Amy's parent's were worried sick about us and asked us what happened. We of course lied to them, like any 12/13 year old would do, and while we helped her parents clean up the auditorium after the party, we felt empty, like something was missing."Maybe we spent all the money" one of us said, and we needed to believe it. The Cappy boys told us we did spend it all on drugs and that if there was any left, that we would never see it again.

Amy and i decided to go into the whoring buisness after that. We knew it paid well and we had a lot of fun parting like adults. We promised we would save up our whore money after that, instead of spending it all on drugs, but as our friendship continud, and our whore buisness as well, i could not stop myself from buying more drugs and alcohol with the money made. I was ashamed to be a whore. Even though i pretended to love it, part of me in the back of my mind remembered what happened that night after all the fun. We were gang raped and humiliated, thrown in the barn and had all of our money stolen. It made us both very ashamed for a long time.

Amy and i watched the movie Pretty Woman every chance we could, dreaming of meeting someone who would treat us with respect and love. It was all we wanted.

After the gang rape at the rodeo, everyone at school started calling Amy and i whores. We were like "yeah, we're whores and proud of it, bitches"and the black girls at school, the metco kids, began to threaten me every day. "WHY WOULD YOU EVER BE PROUD TO BE A WHORE" they asked me. They made me feel ashamed of being a whore, and everyone who called us names became our enemies. We were going to fight the haters together. We became bad-asses. No one would fuck with us. We stole tapes and clothes and everything we thought would make us cool and other people jelous... what we didn't know was that we were digging ourselves a much deeper hole.