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Thursday, January 5, 2012

Guest Blogger Sandy Wolters

A Mother's Sense of Peace and Contentment Moving Into the
New Year
Guest Blogger, Sandy Wolters

Speaking as an overprotective mother with 31 years of
experience, I have made it my life's work to ensure the growth and happiness of
my two daughters. They know in their
hearts and minds that mom will always be there for them to hold their hand when
they have the unfortunate experience of going to a phlebotomist, or if they
just need someone to talk to about their day. While both of my girls are no longer living
with Mike and I, they are still my children and the bond we have is strong.

In mid 2011, I started to notice a change in both of my
girls. I wasn't hearing from them as
often as usual. They weren't coming home
as much as they used to. I chalked this
up to the fact that my daughters were leading busy, fulfilling lives and my
pride for them swelled. I started
noticing in the conversations we were having that men, two men in particular,
were being introduced into the equation.
Keep in mind that my daughters are both beautiful women inside and out. There have been men in their lives, but never
"the one" for either of them. No
man had ever been important enough to bring up in casual conversations. Until, that is, 2011.

December 2011 changed everything. Mike's birthday is December 23rd. It's become a tradition for our girls to take
us out to a special birthday dinner for their dad. It's always just been us, the close knit
family. The week of Mike's birthday, Mike
and I found out that Shandelle and Pilar had invited their boyfriends to join
us. This was a first. Never before in our children's adult lives
had Mike and I been allowed to meet the current boyfriends, let alone meet them
at an important family function. While I
was excited that the men in my girl's lives were important enough for us to
meet, at the same time, I was feeling trepidation. This was, after all, a special
"family" event. Just who did
these guys think they were?

On the way to the restaurant, I was feeling panicked. I knew in my heart from that night forward
things were going to be different. I
knew as a mother, I would be stepping down the ladder of importance and some
man was going to be taking that place with both of my girls. I was having difficulty breathing. What if I didn't like one or both of them? Did these men understand that as I mother, I
would gladly spend the rest of my life in jail if either of them hurt one of my
baby girls? I was in a frenzy by the
time we got to the restaurant.

As Mike and I were walking inside for the impending meeting,
my legs were shaking. My knees were
buckling. In just moments, I was going
to meet the men important enough to join us on this very special occasion. We moved to a gigantic table that was never
needed before. I did what every mother
does. I sat back, tried to control my
breathing and watched. What I saw
brought tears of joy to my heart. My
baby girls were in love. Both of
them. They were glowing with it. Sitting next to them, their men were giving
them stolen glances that reflected everything a good romance writer loves to
write about. Both of the boys ... men
were just as in love with my baby girls.
It was tangible. You could feel
the love in the air.

At that moment, a warmth enveloped me. It started at the tip of my head and slowly
moved down to my feet. I felt peace. I felt the love at the table. I realized that I
had just been given a very special gift.
I had just gained two sons. I
knew in that one perfect moment that my baby girls would always be taken care
of. If something were to happen to me tomorrow,
they would have the support and love they would need to move on. In that one moment, every wish a protective
mother has for her children was granted to me.

So I move into 2012 knowing that my baby girls have each
found a love that I found 33 years ago with their father. It leaves me with an overwhelming sense of
peace and contentment that their lives are fuller and as happy as my life has
been with their father over the years.
My next adventure, grandbabies, lots of grandbabies. :o)

Okay, been there, I have four grown. Two daughters and two sons.I got it doubled. They are all with a soul mate now. Sandy, I learned right off, to accept the mates they chose. If my kids love that person? I love them too. Never did the quizzing mother n law thing, with a bunch of questions it would've alienated everyone. If my kids were in love, I was just happy too. Yes, that fear quivering inside, beneath the surface. Are these good people? Will they cheat? Will they mess with my kid's heart and mind? I would just hold my breath(so to speak) until it would show or not. LOl Wonderful article and I am going to share it!

Wicked Leanore, I hear you. I don't want to be one of those crazy mom-in-laws!

Clarity really set in when I was observing everyone at the table. I don't know if the girls will spend the rest of their lives with these men, but I can tell you that, for now at least, they are very happy. These men seem perfect for my babies. They did good.

Wow, Sandy! I'd have been a WRECK! Two at once??? I admire you just sitting back and watching...I'd have been giving them the third degree, but then again, my two daughters are in high school and my son's a sophomore in college.

When I get to the stage you describe, I'm emailing you for help...I might even have to bribe you with Clay Matthews photos, just so you'll help me out. LOL!

Thanks for sharing and GOOD LUCK with those grandbabies in the future!!

I'd like to say that because I have two sons that it is easier, but unfortunately it isn't. You worry when they are babies, schoolaged, teenagers, and as college students. It simply never goes away. I hate to see a young lady break my sons' hearts. But, I too am looking 'toward' have grandchildren...someday.So, I will have to be patient with these young ladies. ;)

I have both of Bernadette's books. Loved "The Executive's Decision. I just met Sandra via Celebrating Authors on Facebook, so I would love to dive into one of hers.