Non-essential Blob Of Speculative Form
and Function can readily be found in any
progressive home. Though its appearance
is deceptive and mostly unpredictable, it
manages to achieve some realiable
characteristics:

It randomly moves slowly about when it
wants, due to the motorised repositioning
of an internal mechanism.

It shivers when it is too cold, sweats when
it is too warm and quietly hums in tune
with ambient sounds like the fridge, or
air-condtioner.

It records segments of other sounds and
blurts them out sparodically in short,
unpredicatable bursts.

It recharges itself by searching out, and
lying on top of its induction pad once a
week.

It has a single patch of hair, which you can
groom, perm, dye and style according to
taste.

It is guaranteed to be entirely without
anything but a speculative function.

You've got to love the internet. I arrived at this idea then followed jutta's link and ended up learning about the bizarre "Kenneth, what is the frequency" attack on Don Rather of whom and about which, I had never heard.