I had a procedure done on my left arm on December 24, and when I started to wake up I could hear a choir singing Christmas carols over the loudspeaker. I asked, "Am I in Heaven?" I then heard my doctor's voice, and I said, "No, I"m not in Heaven, there's Dr. Lastname." He thought it was very funny.

I had a conversation w/ my doctor that I dont remember after my last major surgery--but that's not much of a story.

Gather 'round folks, and hear about Dawbs and Benedryl (I may have told this before. if I do, I apologize).

Once upon a time, I had a very stressful summer. Being all of 18, working my first 'real' jobs, taking community college classes, my family moving, preparing to go to college in a month, kinda-dating a boy (who turned out to be engaged to someone --I didn't know)...I was having a rough go of it.

I got up early to take several loads of my stuff from my 'home' to my parent's new house, work all morning training my replacement, go to lunch (where I spend the entire time trying to memories Spanish vocab flashcards) and I come back to my job (at a factory--I helped in the front office and also worked 'cleaning' the car parts they made) where I learned that the boy I had a date scheduled with that night would be late, because his room-mate (who was his fiance ) was back in town (and something seemed off). I broke. To much stress.I just...broke in a way that hadn't happened before and hasn't happened since.

My neck started breaking out in hives. My face started breaking out in hives. My chest started breaking out in hives.

Now, I get hives--still--frequently. NBD. But this was NOT normal for me. I wanted to claw my face off. I was finding breathing VERY uncomfortable (still dealing w/ atshma @ that point). My throat was swelling and constricting. I was in a bad way.

The receptionist/secretary used to be a nurse and offered to take me to get help. I accepted.Since I was working in the BFE, she loaded me in her car and debated driving me 30+ miles to 'town' to the ER or about 5 miles away from town to a walk-in clinic. Decided 5 miles was better.

We arrive at the clinic and are told they don't do walkins any more. I'm getting worse. I'm struggling for breath now and dizzy. Secretary asks who does. They tell us to drive to the hospital. Other patients offer me their appoibntment--they say no. Secretary asks where Dr. P (who she used to work for is). They hedge. Secretary starts being LOUD and upset and demands to know where Dr. P is. They realize Secretary WILL create a scene and they admit that Dr. P no longer works at that clinic, he has a walk-in clinic 3 doors down (which doesn't have signs yet).

Secretary drives me to Dr. P's clinic and I" now not getting worse--but I"m not doing well. I start filling out paperwork, Dr. P immediately sees me and gives me a shot--2 doses of Benedryl .Benedryl makes me .. off.Dr. P continues to talk to me, everything is fine. He opens the door so I can leave the examining room and I walk toward the door. THe door dodges--I was walking toward the door but where there should have been door, there was wall.I walk smack into the wall to the left of the door (seriously, apparently I missed the door by like 3 feet), and land in a heap on the floor.

People spring into action and then we have the following conversation:Dr. P: Can you feel this?Me: what?Dr. P (louder): Can you feel this?Me: What?Dr. P: *loudly* How about this? can you feel thisMe: *trying to sit up/look around* Feel what? Dr. P: * making people hold me down* Can you feel this, where I'm poking your legs? Me: I have LEGS?!?!

So...I slept off part of the meds while I was urgently given massages/rub downs/made to look at things, made to do stuff. I don't remember the next few hours.

Then, Secretary grabbed my partially filled out paperwork and offered to call my parents. Except...we had just moved. I didn't know my phone number. (now, if I were SMART and with it, I would have called grandma. But I wasn't smart OR with it).Okay, we can see what we can find--oh wait, I don't know my address either, it's either 9119 or 1991 or 1919 or 9191 on X road in LittleTown.

Secretary eventually loaded me in her car, drove me the 15 miles to LittleTown and literally shouted/shook me awake at EVERY intersection to ask which direction to turn.Then she eventually unloaded me into my parent's arms.ANd I ended up being so out of it for the next few days that I stood the boy up on that 'date' we had .

I can't recall if I did anything funny when I went under aged 13 or 19 (sinuses, wisdom teeth), but apparently when I got tubes in my ears age 4ish I told the nurses tons of jokes. You know, 4 year old jokes. Apparently they were all laughing pretty hard when my parents showed up.

People spring into action and then we have the following conversation:Dr. P: Can you feel this?Me: what?Dr. P (louder): Can you feel this?Me: What?Dr. P: *loudly* How about this? can you feel thisMe: *trying to sit up/look around* Feel what? Dr. P: * making people hold me down* Can you feel this, where I'm poking your legs? Me: I have LEGS?!?!

After my first colonoscopy (aged 18) after the nurse asked me was I doing anything nice that weekend I loudly told her I was about to get a taxi to go get p****ed with my boyfriend in a pub. I didn't curse back then at all, nor do I go out just to get drunk so only god knows where that came from. My Mam was with me and burst out laugh, as did the nurse.

During my second colonoscopy (aged 25) I didn't go fully under during it so and the doctors noticed I was interested in the procedure by my loudly proclaiming, 'this is so awesome, I can see my insides'. So both doctors were explaining the procedure as they were going. At one point the doctor told me he was putting in ink, so I'd have a tattoo inside. To which I replied, 'That's cool man, as long as you don't tell my mother'. I don't usually sound like a hippie. lol

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“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.”- Douglas Adams

Not my story, but the husband of a friend - My friend's husband had to have some minor, outpatient surgery and he was put under and then given some pills to continue taking at home. She got him home and settled on the couch watching tv and then she went to the bedroom. She turned on the tv in there to watch the news while she was doing... whatever it was she was doing (I don't recall). About 5 minutes later she hears him lurching around and she goes to see what's going on. He starts yelling at her to keep away from him and he's trying to get out of the house! Turns out he'd heard the tv coming from the bedroom and he hallucinated that she was in there with someone and they were plotting to kill him! They laugh about it now, but it was pretty bad. There's a note in his file now and he doesn't get that particular combination of meds anymore.

During a dental procedure, I apparently kept repeating "amalgam." Amalgam. Ammmalllgaammmmmm. I only remember saying it once. I was actually getting a composite resin repair, but the anesthesized brain didn't think that sounded as cool, I guess.

For some reason, this totally cracked me up. Ammmmmmmaaaaaallllgaaaammmmmm. LMAO.

My dad told me that when he went to pick up my mom when she had her wisdom teeth out she was a total crank while she was still groggy from the anaesthetic and almost shoved an old man onto the elevator because I guess he wasn't getting on fast enough for her.

When my aunt came out of anaesthetic (I cant remember for what procedure) she was super super chatty, and kept happily gabbing away to a gentleman in the hospital corridor with her. Talk talk talk talk talk. She told me she recalled being annoyed that he wouldn't talk with her; he just nodded or shoot his head. Finally she paused for breath and asked him, "So, what are you having done?" From between clenched teeth, he replied, "I'm having my jaw wired shut."

The chattiness must be genetic to some extent, because when I had a minor surgery back in February and the nurse was there supervising me coming out from under, I saw that they had put me in a room that was decorated with pictures of dogs, and I wouldn't stop gabbing on and on about my work with dogs.

When I had surgery at 17, I don't remember anything much at the hospital, but when I was home and still doped up, I was really, really excited by how soft my skin felt. I kept, er, feeling my skin. Mostly my arms, but actually all over. And telling all my family members they need to feel my skin and how soft it was, too. ALL of my skin.

After a minor procedure a few years ago, I was ready to get up and go well before my legs were ready. Whoops! I was really blabby (but at an extremely low, whispery volume) when I got to the car, then suddenly wouldn't talk at all, then blabby again, then silent. My mom though I was nuts.

You know, I'm kind of jealous. I've never had a reaction to anaesthesia. I've never had a reaction to drugs, unless you consider non-reaction a reaction. (Codeine doesn't work. Neither does acetaminophen - except I do react like I've drunk an entire pot of coffee in that it keeps me awake.)

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After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice: If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.

Wisdom teeth - tried to fight off the doctors before I went under. I don't remember getting home. Was sent to a sleep away dance camp (in Houston at a hotel - 10 min from our house.) while still on pain killers. Apparently told the dance instructor off for yelling at me. (She had been told by our sponsor that I was not to dance just walk the moves because I was on pain killers - she tried to make me dance).

The girls in my room watched HBO - one of those everyone is trying to have their first scrabble experience teen movies. There is a scene on the beach. I apparently sat up told the other girls they had better clean up that sand and ocean before Mrs. Woods saw it and went back to sleep.

When I was put under for my surgery, it was a type of anaesthetic administered in two different stages. The doctor warned me that for the first part, a lot of people say it burns...I mentioned it felt cold; it felt like there was a stream of ice water crawling up my arm. He told me the second part, people say it stings. I don't recall stinging, but I do remember a really awful taste in my mouth. I know I MEANT to comment on that, but I really have no idea if I made it that far LOL.