In the marshlands of the planet Unbraikea in the
Pinwheel Galaxy,
a mantisoid species called "Allien" becomes the first sentient life form in the universe.

An Allien named Jaramu Briwn trips into a bed of hexreeds. His oversized snout
gets caught in one of the reed flowers. His embarrassment turns to joy when he discovers a
beautiful symbiosis between the two species. 600 million years of co-evolved stability
and peace follow.

An Allien named Bell Jymas begins to question the behavior of his society.
"We've done things this way for 600 million years. Why? If nothing ever changes,
what's the point?" he asks. Jymas is mostly ignored by his fellow Alliens.

When we feel crowded, we seek to create holes. When we feel empty, we seek fulfillment.
We yearn for an easy, soothing uniformity in our lives.

It's a rare and remarkable event when an intelligent being wants to pokes holes in a
fulfilling existence.

65,000,000 years ago

Back on Earth, a 6-mile wide asteroid crashes into the Yucatan Peninsula. The resulting
impact hole sends so much debris into the atmosphere that
all the dinosaurs died.

The large hole in the ecosystem left by the death of the dinosaurs creates an opportunity
for some small, mammalian survivors to move in and fill it.

An Allien named Bellu Bayna decides to test out Jymas' theories. He leaves
the safety and comfort of his grassy reed nest, and ascends Mount Nervyny.
For 40 days and 40 nights, he meditates, resisting the temptation to return to his old, easy
life. Following his example, Alliens enter the most dynamic and creative era in their history.

The leader of a movement usually accomplishes little but to point out the center of a hole. It's the
first
follower who is key, for this is the one who brings the shovel and starts digging.

Nearly every ecosystem on Earth is colonized by mammals. But one group of mammalian monkeys
discovers a remaining unexploited hole in their ecosystem. They leave the safety of the trees,
and begin to regularly forage for food on the ground.

This group of monkeys, called "Hominoids" or "Apes", lose their tails, and eventually evolve into
several distinct genera: gibbons, orangutans, gorillas, chimpanzees, and humans.

Kan Yrnasin, a follower of Bellu Bayna's movement, composes an artwork expanding on Bayna's ideas,
entitled "On Sockets". Of the work, fellow follower Mahmyttske says, "Well, the reednet is over,
this work won. Thanks for playing everybody."

"On Sockets" becomes generally regarded as the pinnacle of Allien civilization. Allien society
soon thereafter begins a long descent into disunity, selfishness and ignorance, the combination
of which makes them fail to understand the gravity of their impending disaster until it was
too late to stop it.

A white dwarf star 20 light years from Unbraikea goes supernova. The resulting shock wave
blows a hole in
the atmosphere of Unbraikea, and all the Alliens perish.

When Alliens realize they are doomed, their culture descends into a violent, nihilistic, destructive rage.

A brave few try to overcome the desperately long and unfair odds.
They broadcast their consciousness out into the
expanse of the universe, hoping that someday, somewhere, it will find a recipient who can make
their their existence matter.

Two large scars in the face of an otherwise flat, dry Arizona desert. One is considered among the
most beautiful, defining features of the planet Earth; the other is thought of more as an
unsightly blemish.

What is the difference between a hole that is beautiful and one that is ugly?

Roman authorities kill Jesus Christ by nailing holes into a wooden cross through his hands and feet.

Some holes go beyond mere ugliness. Some holes make us recoil in horror or disgust.

The idea that God, from whose breath this holey universe originated,
would Himself come and willingly participate in both the joys
and the suffering of human life, is a great comfort to many.

image credit:
Mattias Grünewald

1,000 years ago

In order to avoid religious persecution for his scientific work, Ibn al-Haytham, a/k/a Alhazen, a
Persian scientist working in Egypt, feigns madness. He is placed under house arrest for 10 years.
During this time he begins writing his influential
Book of Optics.

Many, if not most, of the technologies which involve manipulating light passing through a hole
were built atop the principles spelled out in Alhazen's work.
A madman may not seem to be of any consequence. But telescopes, cameras, and eyeglasses
certainly do.

Hallowell suffers the usual fate of pioneers, seeing someone else get famous for his work.
During World War II, the hex key becomes more commonly known as the "Allen Wrench",
a trademark of the Allen Manufacturing Company, a competitor of Standard Pressed Steel.

Ten years and ten days after Ken Arneson wed, he wakes up to a giant hole in his living room wall.
Contractors had removed a chimney as part of a small remodeling project.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the country, terrorists use airplanes to make holes in the
World Trade Center and the Pentagon.

Ken Arneson's hole is trivial, easily and quickly repaired.

The friends and loved ones of 3,000 people who died that day suffered a hole in their lives
that cannot be refilled.

image credit:
Ken Arneson

May 10, 2003

Oily sebum clogs a hair follicle on Ken Arneson's head. A hole exposes the sebum to the air,
oxidizing the oil and turning it into an unsightly
blackhead.

Meanwhile, Michael Lewis publishes "Moneyball", a book about Billy Beane, who discovers an
unexploited hole in the Major League Baseball ecosystem.

"Billy, in a single motion, erupted from his chair, grabbed it, and hurled it right through the wall.
When the chair hit the wall it didn't bang and clang, it exploded. Until they saw the hole Billy
had made in it, the scouts had assumed that the wall was, like their futures, solid."

"I despair: I don't want to be a robot, programmed to do what I do, oblivious to the world
burning beneath my feet. I want to know what my feet are doing. I want to know where
the holes in my life are, and why I keep trying to fill them, over and over.
I want to accomplish great feats. I want to see and create beautiful things.
I want to have amazing experiences."

Ken stops and ponders for a moment how an allen wrench, of all things, could maneuver itself into exactly the proper angle to puncture his tire. The odds against it seem desperately long.

Ken walks over to the garbage can, lifts the lid, and tosses the allen wrench into the hole.

image credit: Ken Arneson

September 25, 2011

Ken Arneson goes to see the film version of Moneyball. While watching the film,
his blackhead begins to swell up, painfully infected. Later that night, it bursts open, and the
pus flushes the blackhead away.

"That's a metaphor."

image credit:
Ken Arneson

September 28, 2011

Billy Beane's team plays its final game in a forgettable season. Meanwhile,
two teams that copied the philosophy he pioneered, battle each other for a playoff spot
on one of the most
unforgettable nights
on the timeline of baseball history.