…yet there is madness in it.

Re: Library of Flying Daggers

I was reading author Neil Gaiman’s Twitter feed which directed me to The Hypothetical Library, a blog written by Charlie Orr. Charlie designs book jackets for hypothethical books by real authors and then features them in his blog. When Charlie asked Neil for his hypothetical book, Neil responded by saying that it would have to be a book about things that he would never write–a book full of such forbidden knowledge that to read it would bring about the end of the world. [Note: be sure to read the comments on that post as they are hysterical].

The implied presence of such a book immediately got me thinking. A specialized library like this–especially one that housed potentially dangerous volumes–would need a very specialized group of librarians to look after the collection. In fact, you would need *dramatic pause here* NINJA LIBRARIANS OF THE APOCALYPSE!

Of course, there are many kinds of Ninja Librarians out there, so much so that they have formed their own league as you can see:

Most Ninja Librarians using their ancient art of Information-Fu to help patrons find what they need:

Ninja Librarians of the Apocalypse, however, are charged with keeping problem patrons–Elder Gods, Younger Gods, American Gods, Demons, Shapeshifters, Eldritch Creatures, Things from the Dungeon Dimensions, Indiana Jones, Nazis in search of the occult, etc. –from accessing Information Man Was Not Meant to Know, thus rending the fabric of Time and Space asunder and bringing about the End of the World.

Here we see a Ninja Librarian dispatching a disciple of Cthulu. Disciples of Cthulu are noted for their annoying cell phone habits.

﻿Of course, what would a secret society of skilled librarian ninjas be without their own theme song?

Some of you may be wondering about that hulking fellow center stage. The artwork depicts the Dark Lord Sauron demanding to know who has his Ring of Power. Ninja Librarians are ever vigilant about patron privacy so we had to refuse his request.

Yes, Ninja librarianship is a high risk profession, but as Mr. Spock points out, every occupation has its little draw-backs and sometimes those draw-backs have sharp, pointy spears.