Saturday 19th May 2007

Now if it’s time to recompense for what’s done
Come, come sit down on the fence in the sun
And the clouds will roll by
And we’ll never deny
It’s really too hard for to fly.

So it’s past 2am again. And once more I’m sat at my desk, not really doing much. For once, I am actually tired (and I’ve got a headache), but I’ve once again managed to distract myself. Most nights for the last week or so, I’ve been heading to bed really late. As in “shit, the sun’s coming up. I need to go to bed soon”. And then when I’ve gone to bed, i’ve found it hard to sleep.

Lately I’ve had all these thoughts and ideas floating round my head, and I’ve found it really hard to switch off from them. I’ve kinda been going over things to myself, let my mind wander, and sometimes I’ve slightly surprised myself with where I’ve ended up (and sometimes slightly annoyed myself).

To be honest, most of the reason i’ve been up has probably been because I’ve been listening to music. I’ve generally said “oh, one more track”, but that track has inevitably led to one more, and then to an album. And the reason I’ve been so introspective is probably to do with the type of music i’ve been listening to at these sort of times. If you know your music (or are good with Google), you might have realised that the lyrics at the top of the post are from Fly, by Nick Drake. It is – and I can’t over-state this – an absolutely astounding song. And most Nick Drake does seem to lend itself very well to that sort of introspective thinking. The title of this post is from a Dylan song, which I’ve fond out tonight that Drake covered. I’ve not heard it, but I reckon that if anyone were to sing that song with the right sort of bitter and semi-sarcastic manner which it so much deserves (and of which I am so approving, lets face it), it’s Nick Drake. Listen to one of his albums, and you’ll get what I mean.

I could talk about Nick Drake for a long, long time. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man (again…), you simply do not hear artists like him any more. Which is a shame.

Most of the posts on here are becoming slighty “diaryesque”, aren’t they? The sort of entry that I’d always sworn never to write… I don’t know if it’s because of the move, but that’s just the sort of thing I’ve wanted to write lately. I been finding it very hard to get worked up enough about something to be able to write a meaningful batch of words about it. Or I’ve had a coherent thought or idea that I’ve wanted to write about, but I’ve not been able to put that thought down with the same amount of clarity that it had in my head – I could write about it, but when I read it back to myself it just sounded muddled and confused (“like this post, ho ho ho!”).

Good example of the whole “not getting worked up” thing today. Was sat in the Taf (read: union bar, if you’re not a Cardiffite) earlier with some people, and a discussion about religion (namely Christianity) cropped up. Two of us there were atheists, the others were Christian. And I just couldnt be bothered to discuss it with them – there was no point. The thing that really pisses me off about most religious people (that I’ve spoken to about this, anyway) is that they don’t seem to appreciate where I’m coming from. For instance, someone today was saying that he’s a Christian because it “gives meaning to life”, or somesuch. And he simply couldnt comprehend that I don’t need there to be meaning to life. I am perfectly happy with the realisation that we’re born, we live, we die, and that within a few generations we’re forgotten about. I can see things for what they are, and I’d argue that that viewpoint is a lot more refreshing, much more liberating, and a lot less dangerous, than the view that “God made the Earth for us. He made us in his own image, because He loves us blah blah blah”. Oh, and Christians, when you’re asked a question about something, the answer “well it’s in the Bible” is not always acceptable:

Me: Why don’t you believe in Evolution?Them: Oh, well the Bible says…Me: Yes, but the Bible is a book. “2001: A Space Odyssey” says that 6 years ago we’d be living on the Moon, and would be sending a spaceship to Jupiter, piloted by a sentient computer and two men, with a bunch of the world’s leading scientists in the back of the ship snuggled in their hibernation chambers. I hate to break it to you, but books arent always true.Them: Yes… But the Bible says…Me: Yes, but the fossil record says…

Usually, I’m always up for a good theological discussion. But it bloody annoys me when people who are religious just dont understand your point of view, or don’t try to understand it. This seems to be something I’ve only come across at Uni – I’ve had plenty of other conversations where people have addressed me by not just saying “oh well in the Bible it says…” (yeah, I talk to Jehovas Witnesses when they come to the door), and they’ve turned out to be bloody thought-provoking discussions, for them as well as me, I’d hope.

So, lesson learned from that: theological debate is not compatable with pubs.

I was watching the Panorama on Scientology the other day, and to be honest it was quite an eye-opener. The thought I came away with was, if Christianity – or any other religion – was founded 50 years ago, how would we perceive it? What makes Scientology any different to Catholicism, or Sikhism, or Islam? Except that it’s more socially acceptable to mock Scientology…

Anyway, I’ve gone staggeringly off-piste, and have now forgotten what I was talking about, or where I was going with it. So I should probably leave this here.

1 Comment:

Anonymous

Saturday 19th May 2007, 2:03 pm

the difference between the cult of scientology and religion is that you have to pay for scientology. pay lots and lots. whereas religion is generally more “open source”. apart from the catholic church…