Three Weeks.

Some of you know that I am currently attending class to become a lay-pastor at my church. This is a fairly easy class as I only need to attend once a month, but the papers are sometimes a little difficult.My class was given an assignment to spend 10 minutes a day for three weeks with God.After this we were asked to write anything we want about it.This is my story:

In the beginning I was alone.It was a swift pace on a concrete road; I felt my overly used tennis shoes slap the pavement with each step.The echo continued for miles.I went days like that, days where I only could hear the breeze pass by.I could hear my heart beating, and my heavy panting.But still, I was alone.No one was there for me and I had no accountability to anyone else.I would argue with myself about topics that didn’t matter.I would give myself trophies as if they meant anything.I lived my life in my head, on a road, all alone.

One day I saw someone; they were running too.I looked away and pretended not to notice.He ran near me for a while, but soon I had put a lot of distance between us.Never to be one to show weakness, I ran while he just jogged and smiled.This ruined my stride; he barged into my life and my routine, when no one asked him to be here.I wanted to run alone!I wanted to be myself.Honestly who can be themselves with someone watching all the time?…not me…

A few days later I saw him again.This time I was lost in thought and didn’t put in the extra effort that I usually would have.Fighting some imaginary battle in a far off, exotic land, I just ran.He was quick today.I looked over and felt a primal urge to say something.Maybe I could get him off my back if I just acknowledged his presence.“Hey.” I said.“Hi,” was the reply.I can’t really remember what was said next, something about low clouds or something.But it just seemed right.Like he and I fit in this conversation.We talked and ran for quite sometime, lost in the moment.It was weird, like an old friend.

For three weeks I met this guy on my road. We talked about the day, about the weather, and about, well life in general.I got to know him pretty well and I finally let someone know me.Really know me.I told him that my wife was pregnant, and that I was scared.“Don’t worry,” he reassured me. It’s funny, because, when he told me that I suddenly wasn’t anymore.I let go of the tight grip I had on my world, and let someone enter it.I realized that chaos doesn’t ensue just because I don’t control my surroundings.I finally felt peace about it.

I was excited to run again.I grabbed my shoes and laced them up quickly and sprinted away.I couldn’t get enough of my new friend.I wanted to tell him about all the great stories that I had.I was getting excited for my new child!I smiled at the thought of our little baby and I showed my friend the new pictures we got from the doctor.“We call it Bean,” I told him.He laughed, like he always did.I loved the feeling that he was genuinely interested.Sometimes I thought he was as excited as me about this new baby.

We got bad news from the doctor.We had lost the baby.I was destroyed. My wife was flushed with grief, and we were lost in the world.I still ran, but now I ran in a different direction.I avoided the streets where my friend would run.I ran back to where it was safe: in my head.Again I built empires and toppled kings, alone.Again I only felt alive when I was all alone.But he followed me.I ran, but now he ran faster.Soon he overtook me.He kept pace, though I tried to lose him.”I missed you the last few days.”That’s all he had to say.And I was done.Done running, done hiding, and done lying to myself.I told him everything: about my wife, about my hiding, and about my baby.“I know Brandon.”I looked at his face and I saw he’d been crying.He knew.And he reached out and grabbed me.

I’ve cried before, and I have hugged people before, but never have I been so broken before.I’ve never truly wept in my life until that day.

These past few weeks have seen a change in my life.Though I really don’t feel any different my wife says I am a changed man.Three weeks with God have molded my desires into something that I would never have guessed that I wanted.He moves me daily and flows through me in immense and diverse ways.At the start I was hesitant to the direction that I would take with the daily prayer, but when my wife became pregnant I knew my purpose for this.I prayed daily over her, and again daily alone in my car or in my office.I really got to know Him on a personal level.I heard his voice and felt his presence.It felt physical and really hard to explain.But if you got this far into this paper I hope that I conveyed some type of message as to how it was.

Don’t take this the wrong way, I mean it as a compliment – this is really good but I as for it as literature I think you could refine it and make it excellent. Some of the imagery and such loses some steam in the final third of it. I think with some fine-tuning this could be a real solid bit of prose, something publish worthy.

I like it very much homie.
I do agree with Jesse that a few minor tweaks to the end and you have something really awesome here. You are extremely gifted with your imagination and putting that into your writing with your life’s experiences, wow man.
I mean, as I read this, its like im reading a chapter out a novel. Then, its like wow, this is my homie, and this is his life, things he is acutally going though, experiences he is actually having, how much he is getting blessed and recognizing that.
Its just great, I cant wait to see that in my own life as I grow in my relationship with God.