Thoughts and Musings of a young therapist, student, and professional people observer

Stuck with him

One thing that I’ve admired is women who voluntarily become totally 100% financially dependent on their husbands in the early stages of marriage. Something about that makes me shiver inside. While it could be an expression of true love to go into a marriage without any resources of your own, it’s a scary thing. They say that the area of conflict in most marriages is money. It would seem to me that there would be added stress in that department when one person is making all the money ALL the time. I’ve met women who want with all their hearts to leave their husbands but they can’t because they don’t have any way to support themselves. While there may be housing options available, many do not want that experience. They don’t have the resources needed to sustain a decent quality of life, and many times it’s vastly different than the one that they had with their husband. While some may argue that keeping finances separate and having your own money goes against the “togetherness” concept of marriage, I think it needed in quite a few circumstances. You aren’t planning for failure but you are leaving room for the humanity of both people. Relationships and marriages fail all the time. And while we all want to believe ours is the exception, wouldn’t it be smart to have a backup plan just in case it isn’t? Dropping several socioeconomic classes because you had to leave despite not having adequate resources is a hard experience to have. But it can be avoidable. Not in all situations, but in some.