Archive for the ‘Bad Parenting 101’ Category

Just about the number one job of any parent is to keep our kids safe. We teach them not to take candy from strangers, we tell them to stay away from drugs and cigarettes, and we make sure they wear a helmet when riding a bicycle and a seat belt when riding in the car.

But we can’t be with them every moment of every day — sometimes we just have to let go and trust in what we’ve taught them and in the competence and responsibility of those to whom we entrust them. Whether they’re in the watchful care of a teacher, a fellow parent, or a family member, we have to believe that that person will work as hard as you do to keep them safe — or at least as hard as they do for their own kids. But what if that’s not enough?

Given my fierce opposition to anything violent in my kids’ entertainment and my critique of Pixar’s apparent move away from child-appropriate films (not to mention commenter Tim’s disappointed commentary on their latest film), you would not be out of line to assume that there is no way I would take my kids to see Cars 2. And so you would likely be rather surprised to hear that my kids did indeed go with their Nana to see Cars 2 yesterday. What, you might ask, was I thinking? Why would I allow such a violation of my principles?

It may seem odd to be talking about putting kids on the bus to school when the school year is winding down or even, for many school districts, over and done with, but for one high school sophomore in American Fork, Utah, the morning send-off may be the best part about being through with school. It seems his dad loves him so much, he was willing to go to some pretty extreme lengths to show that love — including by putting on a wedding dress.

Someone I know is getting a divorce. I suspect that most of us, these days, can make that claim most of the time. The percentage of marriages that end in divorce within 10 years ranges from about 1 in 4 to almost half, depending on the age of the bride. There are many reasons why couples split — abuse, dishonesty, and infidelity are common — but I’m not so interested in whether or not a particular reason is valid or sufficient. I’m more interested in why those reasons exist in the first place, especially when there are kids involved.

There aren’t too many Halloween costumes I would forbid my kids from choosing. The more horrific costumes and characters are out, as are overtly sexual ones. Other than that, however, pretty much anything goes. I also have no problem with the kids crossing gender lines, if they so desire. My youngest loves putting on his older sister’s outgrown princess costumes and ballet skirts. I don’t have any problem with that, nor do a lot of other parents — including one who went so far as to write a book on the subject.

Most parents share their religious beliefs with their children; many even require their kids to join their faith. But sometimes parents take that a little too far. Consider the case of Julia Lovemore who killed her six-week-old daughter by shoving pages from her bible in the baby’s mouth and sitting on her. According to a judge, Lovemore was “profoundly mentally disordered and suffering from religious delusions at the time.”