Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Not What I Wanted to Do

I had to go to court for my daughter last week, and because the judge gave her a lawyer & a continuance, I have to go back again this afternoon. She was not pleased to see me there last week, she immediately started crying when I walked in. I guess it's because I'd know what all of her charges were & she couldn't lie to me anymore. There were a total of five charges, including public intoxication, and criminal mischief (they stole a cop car & went joyriding). Her probation violations are marijuana, alcohol & association with a known felon.

I'm just done.

I don't and can't trust her in my home. I'm worried that she would rob us blind and sell everything to buy booze, then claim it was a burglar. If I thought getting a security system would help protect me from her, trust me, at this point, I would buy one. At this point, all we can do to protect our assets and hearts is to stay as far away from her as possible, until we're ready to be around her again. I'm still so angry that it's probably a good idea that she's still in jail & I'm not allowed to speak to her in court.

I'm really dreading going today, I'm so worried the judge will just let her out again for whatever reason. She needs to be sitting in jail, where at least we all know she's safe and sober. I'll be happy to have it over again, at last, so I can get back to my normal life and stop being upset and stressed out all the time.

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About Me

Within ourselves lies a drive, a force that only makes sense to us. It is that force that can make a person crazy. Crazy is only what you make of it. In the past, most people have been trained to think that crazy is a negative thing... but I repeat, crazy is only what you make of it. Crazy is a state of mind comprised of desire, anger, knowledge, courage, fear and devotion. Crazy makes people fall in love. Crazy makes a musician and an artist talented. Crazy makes a dying man take his own life. Make what you will of this, but I cannot believe I would be any better off sane. Therefore, I am, and will remain, crazy.