Friday, 28 May 2010

Happy Saturday morning all, its early here, 7.21 am, have been awake since 5am when George woke up, he went back to sleep, I didn't. Have been reading the 4th twilight book, breaking dawn, but i'm not really enjoying it, seems a bit silly. I guess that it is aimed at teenagers and i'm 37! Will persevere though.Isobel is downstairs with me, the boys are sleeping, we're watching Mamma mia for the 100th time.

Did my official weigh in today and I was 16st 6 lbs! which is 230 lbs. I'm delighted and can't help but think that avoiding the scales everyday (other than Thursday!) has helped, i'm certain my toothache has really helped but hope that i'm becoming used to smaller portions, I have a fill on the 8th so that should help too. I won't weigh in again until next Saturday.

My jeans are getting far too big, they're a uk size 22, I have some in a uk 20 which felt a little tight when I tried them the other day but I may have lost a couple of pounds since then, I don't mind them being a bit tight but hate the dreaded muffin top they give me.Will try them again today and then hope that I never have to wear the 22's again. These jeans didn't fit me before the pre-op so its a great achievement.

Am going to the gym this morning, was thinking about walking there, its a couple of miles each way but the weather looks awful so probably won't. Hope that everyone has a great weekend.

Thursday, 27 May 2010

I said that I wouldn't stand on the scale until Saturday but I weighed in today. I'm very happy that I did, I weighed 16st 7 lbs today which is 231 lbs. I'm really pleased, that means i've lost a total of 22 lbs. I had been stuck at 16 10 for ages, i'm really pleased to get past it and i'm not going back there.I won't weigh until Saturday now, i'm sure that my tooth really helped with my weight loss. 12 days until my next fill, I have no restriction at all.

Have been to the gym today, think that I need to try and get more exercise, will try and do something with George tomorrow.

I'm half way through Grace's vlog (http://graces-fat-chance.blogspot.com), my heart goes out to you lovely.

Wednesday, 26 May 2010

Hello, thanks so much for your comments yesterday, I felt so sorry for myself, sorry to be so self indulgent.

Am feeling ok today, mouth is a little tender but i'm much better than I thought I would be. I'm not very hungry, I tell you, going to the dentist is the cure for obesity!

My lovely friend, Sarah, was around today, she's the only person other than Paul that knows about my surgery, she thinks I look like i've lost alot of weight since she last saw me which I think was Friday. I'm not weighing in until Saturday but its made me really want to have a peek at the scales, will try and be strong.

Isobel's ebay snow white costume came today, she is delighted with it, i've taken some photo's, she was doing an odd dance for most of them so she looks a little strange but I will post my favourites. Not sure why they have appeared at the top of the post. The first one is of George, Isobel is pulling one of her dancing faces but how cute is my boy?The second one is a rare tender moment between them, Isobel has just had her hair cut today and they have both been super good (so far!!!)

Tuesday, 25 May 2010

I had to have root canal today, i've been calling it route canal and its only just dawned on me that thats wrong! All was going ok but the dentist said that he couldn't do it due to something wrong with the roots, something that I was born with apparently and it would have to come out. I trust him, if it has to come out it has to come out, it was horrible! really really horrible. My whole face was numb including my eye and my nose, i'm swollen and the pressure he had to apply in order to remove it was immense. I was thinking whilst he was pulling as hard as he possibly could that perhaps the tooth was quite happy where it was and we should leave it. It came out in the end, I left looking like i'd been in a fight!

Before I got to the dentist when I was dropping Izzy at school I looked in my handbag and realised that George's drink for nursery had leaked, a good half a pint of liquid had gone in my handbag and ruined my mobile phone and my burberry purse, so my day wasn't going so well to start with.

Since returning from the dentist i've been strangely tearful, mainly when i've just spoken to someone, think i'm feeling a bit sorry for myself. Maybe its the novacane?

Still haven't stood on the scales, if i'm honest i'm slightly scared that they might go up after over indulging at the weekend so that makes it easier! After my dental treatment i've not eaten anything other than a banana all day as I didn't get around to breakfast this morning. Also, i've not been to the gym either, will go on Thursday and if I feel ok and Paul gets home from work early enough I might try tomorrow evening.

Monday, 24 May 2010

Thanks so much for all your lovely comments, I will be certain to post pictures of Isobel dressed up as snow white. Its very funny, she's not much of a girly girl although not a tomboy either but for parties she insists on wearing make up, someone bought her some kids make up for her birthday, I wouldn't normally allow this but actually its just fine glitter so its fine, she does make me laugh that she drags the kit out, she never asks for it at any other time.

As my title suggests its still quite hot here, although not too bad really, the worst thing about it is that I drive a black car and it gets really hot, just checked the weather and its going to drop a long way so tomorrow expect me moaning about the cold!

Have booked a fill, couldn't get one on a Saturday but have one for an afternoon in London, its on the 8th of June, my lovely husband is taking a half day to look after the kids/do the school runs.

My eating has been ok today but I am aware i'm eating too much in one sitting, I sometimes feel a little stuck, more uncomfortable than anything, like I need a drink to clear it but it doesn't ever make me feel full or sick so I assume that this is the result of a little restriction but not how it will be when i'm at my "sweet spot"

Hope that everyone is well today, bedtime for me!

Forgot to say, still haven't weighed!! Since saturday! I normally weigh in at least 5 times a day so this is great.

Sunday, 23 May 2010

Ok, we've established that i'm fat and really really pale so no suprise that i'm still not really enjoying the warm weather, it was somewhere around 30 (86f ish) today. Typically its meant to be 30 again tomorrow and then cool right back down again so I really shouldn't complain.

I'm challenging myself not to weigh everyday, my weigh in day will be Saturday and I will do my very best not to weigh in between.

Have had a busy day, gym, getting a tyre fixed on the car which cost a fortune and then (yet) another birthday party! I've mentioned before that Isobel goes to a girls school and there are 18 girls inc her in her class, each of them has had a party and we seem to have alot around now, we have 5 in the next 3 weeks! Its just so time consuming. Next Sundays party is a Princess party with princess dress essential, well its optional but Isobel feels that its essential! I've just bought her a snow white dress on ebay, it was super cheap and she'll love me forever once she see's it, she loves snow white.

I'm a big reader, I've normally always got a book on the go, i'm just about to finish Karin Slaughter's Genesis. I love Karin Slaughter, quite gory but very gripping. After this I have the 4th twilight book to read but then nothing else lined up, would love some recomendations. I'm fairly game for any kind of book.

Need to book a fill, I have 5cc's in a 14cc band, I don't really have any restriction. I have trouble getting to my Dr's office as they're in central London and i'm very nearly in East Anglia (v frightening, I swore I would never live in EA a few years ago!) they are in London on a Thursday morning and because of my children its really hard for me to get there, really the only way for me to do it is for my husband to take the day off work. He generally is very good and would do this if he could but has just started a new job (with same company) and is very busy so its not really going to happen. I think that my provider do a clinic in Birmingham on a Saturday, although this is a longish drive its going to be the easiest way for me to get a fill. I'm going to check this out and hopefully book a fill tomorrow.

Hope that everyone is well, my thoughts and prayers are with Barbara and her family http://myluckylapband.blogspot.com/

Saturday, 22 May 2010

Do you ever think that other people have much more interesting lives than you? I read alot of blogs and everyone seems so glamorous and thin and interesting! My life is so boring in comparison.

Have done well food wise this week, scales down to an all time low of 16 st 10, which I think is 244 pounds, TOM came today which may stall me for a little while but i'm ok with that.

So hot here at the moment, its set to be 24 c (about 75f) today which we don't get that often, having my normal summer struggle with summer clothes, I don't really have the arms for short sleeves never mind sleeveless!

My husband is going to a poker night tonight, he's never played before, they aren't going to know what has hit them! I'm going to stay in and watch Twilight, I started watching it the other night but my MIL called and kept me on the phone for over an hour. I found it a little slow but I guess that its like that when you've read the book.

Monday, 17 May 2010

Scales were kind this morning 16st 11 and a half, better than I deserve, thats 245.5 lbs.

After dropping Isobel at school George and I went to the zoo, we are season ticket holders and go there alot, we did a couple of hours of walking, I feel tired at the moment though, not sure why.

I really didn't fancy breakfast this morning, maybe thats because of the fill, yesterday I only managed 3/4's of a slice of toast. I bought some cooked sliced chicken and ate that whilst wondering around the zoo, my protein intake can sometimes be low so that will help. I could feel it when i'd eaten it and my stomach is still making funny noises now. It felt a little stuck at one stage and I had to have some water to help it down. I feel uncomfortable rather than full, is that normal?

School is getting me down, they basically told my husband that Isobel is way way ahead of the rest of the class but they are worried about her behaviour, they want to get a educational psychologist in to assess her, she's only 5 and I don't want that, I want her to be left alone, to add insult to injury the cheeky buggers want us to pay for it! Its going to cost around about £500. She is a challenging child, she's hard work, it seems to me that they want me to pay for someone to go it to tell them how to do their job. Paul and I are in discussion about what we should do, if it was down to me I would be looking for a new school!

Sunday, 16 May 2010

After saying that I was going to be a good bandster and stay on liquids for 3 days I ate solid food, it was quite mushy and went down ok, everything I ate on Friday went down ok. Saturday I had a couple of bread rolls for lunch and almost got stuck, I guess it was a combination of fluffy bread and not chewing well enough, until then I thought I had no restriction.Last night we went out for dinner, it was my husbands birthday and we had a baby sitter, yay! I did ok, felt a couple of slight stuck feelings bit generally ok, although I was able to eat 3 courses, my main was a seafood stew type thing which I didn't eat much of so possibly not too bad.

I've not been doing well with my food choices and snacking, the stressfull school situation is still ongoing and i'm very unhappy about things that were said at the meeting. I've done my normal thing of turning to rubbish food, Its probably just an excuse.

I have been to the gym 3 times though so thats something. Am going to try and make better choices and not find excuses to eat rubbish.

Thursday, 13 May 2010

Had my first fill yesterday, it didn't hurt at all, I had an xray at the same time to make sure that the band was in the right place and so they could check how much restriction I had. I now have 5cc's in a 14cc band. I'm on fluids for 3 days, I have to admit that I was very hungry yesterday and was nibbling on wasabi peas on the way home (have you tried them? they are amazing!)

Lots of stress here at the moment, all with my daughters school. My husband has an appointment with her school this morning to talk about her "progress" which I think basically means her attitude!She's a very bright girl and she is bloody hard work, she is trying it on with them to get attention, this has been going on since she started in September last year, she's only 5. I've had meetings with them before saying that I believe that they need to deal with her in a short and sharp way, instead they seem to talk to her for ages and she gets lots of attention from that. Just last week she decided that she wasn't going to stand in line, she ended up in the headteachers office for an hour making excuses about why she didn't want to! An hour! Has the woman got nothing better to do?So, although the teacher feels its very important that i'm at the meeting i'm not going, mainly because of 4 things, my husband doesn't want me to go, I will probably cry, I will get defensive and I most probably tell them to shove it or probably all of the above! Oh and I have to look after George too.I am ready to move her to another school, this has gone on since she started and I find it incredibly stressful, as I said she is a pain but we have ways of managing her here, I can't understand why they are unable to do the same at school.

Anyway, because of all the stress combined with not loosing the 2 lbs I gained when I went out last Saturday my diet started to go downhill on Tuesday, it was just an excuse really, I also had that last supper feeling on Wednesday and had a lots of peanuts. I don't normally eat peanuts although I love them, Isobel is allergic to them, her throat swells so I don't take the chance of having them around the house, so in my messed up logic I thought I must eat the whole pack of peanuts, I did, its had a very odd effect on certain bodily functions!

The Dr was pleased with my weightloss, it only showed as 12 lbs on their scales as I was wearing jeans and a couple of pounds of peanuts too I should think!

Sunday, 9 May 2010

Its not actually mothers day here but it is in most other places. Hope that everyone is spoilt and/or spoils their mum today.

I will tell my husband its mothers day here just to panic him I think!

Went for tapas last night, there was alot of food, I ate about 3/4's of my portion and was stuffed, it was really nice though. I suprised myself by not having dessert, I had coffee instead. Unfortunatly the scales are up 2 pounds but I know that thats probably down to salt and eating late at night and will go shortly.

Off out shortly to take Isobel to the cinema, want to do a little shopping too, I need some new make up and I'd like some fitness trainers, skechers or MBT's. Was talking to a lady in the gym today who bought some and said they were on offer so will go and have a look.

Saturday, 8 May 2010

Went to see the dentist yesterday, I have an infection and will require a root canal, how did that happen? Everything was fine 6 months ago.

The kind of plus side is that i'm not very interested in eating and have been sticking to mush type food as chewing hurts.

Weighed in this morning at 16st 10 & 3/4 lbs. (234 and 3/4 lbs) This is an alltime low! This makes my total loss just over 18 lbs.

Didn't have a great night's sleep as my son woke up wet when we went to bed, he wears 2 nappies, have no idea how that happened and then Isobel woke at 2am having wet the bed! This happen's rarely, I think that they must have planned it! So now I have lots of laundry and its raining outside (I prefer my sheets to dry outside)

Am going out to dinner with a couple of friends tonight, really hoping that I won't overeat, the way my mouth feels its unlikely. I will stick to something fairly mushy, risotto or something, I might have a small dessert though, maybe a little icecream but won't go over the top.

Am going to take my toothache to the gym shortly, my brain is making excuses but I must go as with the kids being ill i've not been since Sunday. Have a lovely weekend x

Friday, 7 May 2010

There was a general election here in the UK yesterday, have been watching the results come in for the last couple of hours, its looking like a hung parliment with the conservatives having the biggest majority. Not sure how I feel about it, I didn't vote conservative!

Less than a week to my fill! 6 days in fact, I had a letter yesterday with details of my band, I have an AP Large which holds 14cc. I'm suprised at that, thought it would be a 10cc one, can't help but think that my stomach must be huge to have one as big as that and feel a bit unhappy about it, not sure why, i'm sure it doesn't matter at all.

I was banded 6 weeks and 1 day ago.

My scales say 16st 11.5 pounds (235.5) today which is a total loss of 17.5 lbs. I'm feeling like I have now got in to a routine with my eating, i'm really pleased about it but would probably starve without Innocent Veg pots!

Hope everyone has a lovely Friday, I have an awful toothache, maybe thats why i'm not eating so much!

Thursday, 6 May 2010

Have yet another ill child, George now seems to have an ear infection, he's been up since 1am, brought him in to us at 5, he slept a little as did I, I then woke up with him giving me a massive kiss, the sentiment was lovely but I thought I was drowning! So no nursery for him which means no gym for me and no vacuuming the stairs - am very disapointed! We're off to the Dr's in a while and then i'm hoping that we can both sleep, Isobel is better and my friend has taken her to school and is picking her up from school and giving her dinner which is lovely of her.

The scales are my friend today, I weighed in at 16 st 12 lbs (236 lbs), which is my lowest weight, I only stood on them twice, was too exhausted to do it again. Feel like i'm back on track which is great, eating (healthy) ready meals seems to be really helping. I've lost a measily 17 pounds in total.

Have mentioned before that no one other than my husband and best friend know about my surgery, I planned to tell my friend N about it. She's a good friend and is quite overweight, she told me about 2 years ago that she was doing a vlcd (very low cal diet) called Lighterlife and that was a last ditch attempt and if it didn't work she was going to have surgery. I remember thinking that that was quite drastic! She did well on the diet but came off it and gained a fair bit of weight back, I invited her out for dinner for my birthday in March and she said that she was back on the diet and couldn't come.I tried to call her a few times before my surgery and didn't get an answer, tried again after surgery and got no answer. Caught her on facebook the other day and had a chat, I mentioned that i'd tried to call, had she been away, she hadn't. So I told her that i'd wanted to tell her that i'd had surgery and i've not heard from her since, this is 2 weeks ago!To be fair, she has alot going on, she has a son who has special educational needs and has been out of school for a while so she has been fighting to get him a place somewhere aswell as looking after him full time.But, I am finding it very odd, I wonder if she's a bit cross that I had surgery and she hasn't or she has had surgery and doesn't want to say. There is every possibility that I am over thinking this and she'll be in touch soon, it is very odd behaviour for her though. Has anyone had odd reactions from people who they thought would be supportive?

Wednesday, 5 May 2010

Did I mention that my scales were rubbish? They are today I weighed in at 17 st 0 (238 lbs) I can never trust it so tried again, it said 16st 13 (237) 3 times so I thought that was probably it, made the mistake on standing on them about 5 minutes later and they said 17st twice so have no idea really!Have looked at buying some more, have checked out lots of reviews and none seem to be very accurate, does anyone recomend any scales? Even if they are in the US I should be able to get them here.

Managed to eat well all day yesterday, am going to do the same today. I have the added problem of having both of my kids at home today, Isobel has an ear infection, went to dr's last night and was told to keep her off school today. She seems fine, bit snotty, bit tired and her behaviour is appalling so same as usual!

I know that I moan about my kids alot here, I love them more than anything but goodness me Isobel is trying my patience at the moment. She is 5 going on 13. She got in to trouble at school yesterday for refusing to stand in line. She spent an hour with the headteacher making up excuses for not standing in line and refusing to appologise. I know that this could be as she was feeling a bit unwell but this is the latest in a long line of things.I do think that because of the kind of school it is with fairly small class sizes they see and address everything whereas in larger classes some of it would be noticed.Anyway, I could go on but quite frankly i'm boring myself, I have no idea what to do.

Tuesday, 4 May 2010

No real reason for the title other than hearing the song on the radio in the car this morning. Had just dropped George at nursery so turned it up loud and sang along. In case you don't know its a Wham song and ridiculously camp.

Anyway, i'm not a young gun (what is a young gun anyway?) but today I am going for it! My food choices have been stupid lately, we spent the school fee's on this band and what am I doing? Trying to snap it off by eating loads of food! Incidently, I saw an article in a downmarket magazine the other day about a woman who's band had snapped!

But not today and not from now on, oh no. I have it all planned out today, breakfast was to be a shake with a banana, this didn't happen as the stupid blender wouldn't blend, I really must take it back to the shop. I had wheatabix instead, worth about 200 cals, lunch was a Innocent veg pot risotto, was ok 260 cals. Dinner will be another Innocent veg pot, a dhal one, about 300 cals, I may have a smoothie lolly thing tonight too which would be 100 cals. I've had some tea and will have more so will allow about 100 cals for milk. Taking me to roughly 1000 cals.

Scale said 17st 2 again today (240 lbs) in fact it said 17.2 and 1/2 but i'm ignoring the half for now!

Today have done lots of housework, my floors look lovely, I feel quite achey after it so it must have helped, my daughter has a friend coming home from school with her today, she lives in the cleanest house i've ever been in so i'm trying to not show myself up!

Hope that everyone has lovely days, thanks so much for your comments, it means so much.

Monday, 3 May 2010

Happy mayday! Not sure if other countries celebrate, not that we celebrate we just have the day off work/school.

I feel a bit of a let down but I didn't go to the support group on Saturday, I was planning to go but George had been ill and up half the night, I went to the gym in the morning and to be honest I was tired and I just couldn't be bothered, its about a 40 minute drive from here. I will go next month, its not that I will never go again, I find I get so much support from here that its not that much of an issue for me.

The scales showed a shocking 17st 2 today! Have been 16 st 13 for ages, I deserve 17 2 though, i've not been great. It has given me a bit of a kick I think, I will try and be better, 10 days to my fill.

Managed to go to the gym Saturday and Sunday, I would normally go tomorrow too but couldn't get a suitable slot as George is only at nursery for 2 hours, I really need to clean and treat my floors so will come home and do that, it should be quite good exercise. Will go Thursday and Saturday and Sunday and will do something that involves alot of walking with George on Wednesday.

Have just come back from yet another party, it was ok, don't have anymore invitations as yet, yippee!!