Anyways, her interest in learning has gotten me thinking about my job as her role model.

How many times do I tell my kids to say "please" and "thank you" and then forget to say them myself?

Or even harder...how many times do I tell Mackenzie to ask us for forgiveness when she disobeys us and forget to ask God for forgiveness when I disobey Him?

How many times do I tell Mackenzie to love others like she loves herself or that God wants us to obey all the way, right away and with a happy heart (good attitude) and forget to do it myself?

I feel like I go through this tension a lot.

For example the other day I was late (as usual) to Bible Study.

I threw the still warm pumpkin bread I had baked (for our brunch /that day) and the kids in the carand turned the key just to find out my car wouldn't start.I tried it multiple times and nothing.

It wouldn't start at all.Ugh! I hate when that happens!Luckily my friend who lives next door also goes to my Bible Study so I was able to hitch a ride with her.

Anyways, when the car didn't start Mackenzie and I prayed that God would fix our car but nothing happened.Obviously God didn't want my car to be fixed right then and there.That would be way too easy and of course I would have learned nothing about faith and waiting on the Lord.So after Bible Study I was talking to my leader and telling her about the car troubles(I forgot to mention my husbands car stopped working last weekend as he was driving up the mountain to a men's retreat. It needs a new transmission).I asked to her to pray that my car would just work without needing to be fixed at all.And no joke later that day I went out to try my car againand it worked.And it's been working ever since.Praise God!

So yesterday Mackenzie and I were driving in the car when we had this conversation.Mackenzie: Mommy remember yesterday (anything in the past is usually referred to as yesterday) our car was not working and we had to go to church with Emmy and Mrs. Cyndi.Me: Yeah I remember. But do you remember what God did? He fixed our car! We prayed that He would fix our car and He answered our prayer!Mackenzie: But Mommy (laughing) God didn't have a hammer!Me (laughing): No he didn't. God didn't even need a hammer. Do you remember what God made (Mackenzie is learning about creation at church).Mackenzie: Yes. He made the trees, and the flowers and Wesley and animals.Me: You are right. He made everything in the whole wide world. If he can make trees and flowers and Wesley do you think he can fix our car?Mackenzie: Yeah fixing our car is easy.Me: Your right. God is so big and powerful. He can fix anything he wants....and I went on and on to remind Mackenzie about how good and big and loving our God is. I'm pretty sure I lost her after "God can fix anything" but oh well.

As I was thinking about that conversation with Mackenzie I was reminded about how often I doubt or at least don't live like God is really big and powerful and loving. Why when we are financially stretched do I stress out instead of put my full trust in God who loves me and has promised to take care of me? He is the creator of the universe. Providing the money to pay off medical bills (or whatever it is) is so easy for him. Yet sometimes he chooses not to. And that's ok too. Because he always has our best interest in mind. Even when he allows us to go through tough times it's always for his ultimate glory and our greater good. Like with my car. He could have fixed it right away. But then Mackenzie and I wouldn't have learned such a powerful lesson in faith. Anyways, just thoughts on my mind I thought I'd share with all of you.

Do you guys go through the same thing?

Do you ever feel like your teaching yourself (or at least reminding yourself things we already know but may not do) as you teach your kids?

4 comments:

happens to me all the time. My daughter loves to pray, and she knows that God answers her prayers and reminds me when I just think maybe the answer is no, that God will still answer our prayers. I learn alot from them

You are *not* the only one! I swear God brings up issues with my kids just so I'll learn *my* lessons. I'm constantly convicted by the simple kids Bible songs -- the simple Gospel is still profound even all these years later.

I love this! God has been teaching my family this a lot lately..faith. We're missionaries and we have this HUGE budget to raise before we hit the field. I get so frustrated when it doesn't get come in when "I" expect it to.....but he knows. :) When God has us that doesn't mean he abandons us! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!