Watching nature take its course, from the top of a hill in northern England

As I Slept I Dreamed a Dream

Earlier this week our family gathered in Worcester for the funeral of My Mother-in-law (MiL).

She moved to Worcester in the mid 1980’s she loved the city, but most of all she loved her home. The epicentre of her home was her cosy kitchen, with its original cast iron range (which she took great pride in keeping lit all winter) and the steady, contented, tick tock of her clock.

I thought the sentiment captured M-i-L’s relationship with both her home and with the city of Worcester. The quote is from the opening line of John Bunyan’s Pilgrims Progress.

MiL’s faith was very important to her, as was music (it was The Three Choirs Festival that first brought her to Worcester) and her funeral drew together many people from different churches in the city, there was beautiful music and hearty, tuneful singing (not from me, I so can’t sing at the best of times, let alone with a lump in my throat!) It was a service that celebrated her life and truly captured her spirit, which is just what we hoped it would be.

Describing MiL to a colleague I said she was ‘feistily independent’: and feisty was a word that cropped up several times during the funeral service, it’s also a word that could be easily substituted for passionate.

She was passionate about the ordination of women, she was a lay reader and involved with the group Women in Theology. She was passionate about her political beliefs and her wish for peace, she was a peace demonstrator at Greenham Common back in the 1980’s.

MiL was also passionate about her bike, a keen cyclist all her life she cycled from Worcester to stay with us in north Derbyshire during her 70th year, staying at youth hostels along the way. I remember she asked when she arrived if she could take a soak in a hot bath. I asked would she perhaps like a glass of sherry to take with her? She giggled and replied ‘I’ve never done that before, it sounds very decadent, but yes I think I will!’ She flatly refused to wear a cycle helmet, her theory being that it was the motorist responsibility not to hit her! (I’m pleased Tom has a very different attitude to cycle helmets!)

That told him. She would also have told you, don’t gabble, look at me when you are speaking to me and take your hand away from your mouth. Her hearing loss made social occasions, with lots of chatter and background noise particularly difficult; she had a poster above her desk, it read

‘The loneliest place in the world is the edge of a conversation’

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Watching the rhythm of rural life, from the top of a hill in northern England.
Having spent most of my life avoiding writing, I now need to do it!
I am no domestic goddess, but if I were expecting visitors to my home, I would whisk round with the duster and plump up the cushions and generally make the place look presentable. I hope that by putting my words where others may see them it will encourage me to ‘tidy up and push the Hoover around’ my writing.
On the other hand I may just be adding to the compost heap. Only time will tell!
Pull up a chair, sit yourself down, I’ll put the kettle on.

13 thoughts on “As I Slept I Dreamed a Dream”

My sincere condolences to you and your family on the loss of your mother-in-law. Losing someone so close is such a huge loss. It sounds like her funeral was a wonderful celebration of her life, and I enjoyed getting a glimpse of her passions through your words. Feisty is a great descriptor and certainly held her in good stead, I am sure. I admire her active approach to life, and I bet that hot soak (with sherry) was most appreciated after an arduous bike ride. It sounds like she was the heart of her home, and her cozy kitchen sounds so welcoming. The quote you shared is most fitting and comforting.

Your MiL sounds like a truly wonderful lady. I’m sorry she’s passed from your lives. Your remembrances gave me pause, made me smile, and tear up. Thank you for sharing a bit of her life – and yours – with us.

It is always hard to see someone who so embraces life pass from us. But it sounds as though she enjoyed her life totally. We can’t ask much more.
My nephew (from Chicago) spent a year at the University in Worcester and loved it. He has gone back to stay with friends he met while there this past summer. He loves the city as well. I hope to visit sometime as well. It sounds like a wonderful place to live.

What a grand MIL you had! Lucky you, to have known such a feisty lady! As I’m struggling with some hearing loss, I so appreciate her comment:
‘The loneliest place in the world is the edge of a conversation’ Now I’ll remember to draw in anyone who’s there.

The day mum moved in, I remember we (or maybe I) decided we needed to light the stove in order to boil the kettle for a cup of tea. Using the electric kettle might have been a better idea; it was at least 3 hours later that we got our tea but more enjoyable for the wait.

In the years to come it was so nice turning up in the winter with the stove roaring away.

The architects who had managed the renovation of the house (and decided to keep the range) before mum bought it were at the funeral. They were mum’s neighbours for several years and it was nice to see them again.

What a wonderful story! Several stories In fact. MiL must have treasured the knowledge that her family is full of adventure and love for each other. My condolences.
Now I must go find a copy of Pilgrim’s Progress – you’ve made it seem something I might like to read rather than ought to read.

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Uphilldowndale

Watching nature take its course, from the top of a hill in a rural area of Derbyshire, England......
Here I write about this, that and the other; posts are about whatever catches my eye, or captures my imagination: my take on the world usually comes from a rural perspective, but I make no promises.......
I have a bit of a ‘magpie’ mind, it is eclectic and has a preference for collecting bright shiny things. Comments are very welcome.
We are a family of four; my self, Mr Uphilldowndale (Mr Uhdd), and our two boys, Tom aged 19 and Joe 17. In addition there's Jammy and Dodger the kittens, 5 maverick chickens and last but not least a bouncy dog named Spud, who has many adventures
I love the landscape here and the wildlife, I have a special interest in lumps of rock, as you will see if you stay around for a while.......
Welcome to this blog, I hope you find something of interest, and if you do, please call again; next time you are passing.
Heather Uphilldowndale