Fashion Fails, Fashion Wins

So I found a horribly absurd news article the other day. Those creatures spawned from the depths of hell, the Trollsen Twins, i.e. Hairy-Kate and Trashley, have been named Vogue’s best dressed of this year. Yeah, seriously.

Here are some pics of the trampy twins, looking like shit:

I really hope that guy on the stairs is poised and ready to run up from behind and send them both flying.

The one with the feathers – let’s just call her Hairy-Kate, has constipation and has forgotten to take out the hanger before she donned this sartorial horror. Trashley, meanwhile, is smirking in a self-satisfied manner, oblivious to the fact that she looks like a grandma. Not like one of the cool grandmas you see a lot of nowadays, but the weird, scary kind; you know, the ones who stink like cat’s piss and chase people with axes.

It’s Halloween every day of the year, I tell ya!

Look! It’s those eccentric pigeon women who hang around Trafalgar Square! Only these are the evil versions, out to murder the wildlife…

The despicable duo couldn’t even leave their pet dog alone. Poor guy has already had his fur shaved off and turned into an ugly coat.

Mark Holgate, Vogue Fashion News Director and Editor of the best-dressed issue called the bizarre choice: “kind of a no-brainer.”

Haha, no. It’s just that you have no brain. Tragically, he even goes on to ask, “Are there any more chic, stylish, cool, and original sisters than Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen? They are incredibly stylish.” Ha, epic fail.

You thought it couldn’t get worse, didn’t you? Well, wait, there’s more. The severely deluded Holgate chap thinks the “fact they have appeared on worst dressed lists in the past, including an annual one from late fashion critic Mr. Blackwell, is actually a positive thing.” O rly? O RLY???

So, right now you’re probably wondering what on earth I have against these two hideous, fur-wearing hags.

:Yes:

I’m hoping that readers of my blog are kind, gentle souls who would rather poke out their own eyes than harm any innocent creature. If, however, you weren’t raised right, and need convincing as to why the fur trade is sick, evil, and has no place in any society calling itself civilised, click here.

It’s not just the Trollsens though, unfortunately. Dishonourable mention must also go to these other fur-loving scumbags. Here’s a somewhat out of date Hall of Shame, courtesy of PETA.

I hate to end this post on a sour note, so…

Now on to the FASHION WIN.

Okay, so the King of Bhutan married Jetsun Pema recently. She is one beautiful lady. You can tell right off that she’s a natural beauty; even without a scrap of make up on she’d still look amazing. Ya, she’s lovely and all. Super stylish, too.

Well, never mind all that – have you seen this dude’s boots?! Seriously, wow! Bhutan’s King Jigme Khesar Namgyel Wangchuck, aka His Majesty the fourth Druk Gyalpo Jigme Singye Wangchuck, is the owner of some incredible footwear. These boots are made of pure win:

Here he is wearing a similar pair:

Funky footwear appears to run in the family. I think the fellow in the middle is the current king’s father:

Disappointingly, King Wangchuk has also been known to don more ordinary shoes, as seen below:

Well, I guess everyone is entitled to an off day. If he ran around in fabulous footwear every single day, I suppose it would make less of an impact. But this picture below is truly his Crowning Moment of Awesome:

These boots just blew me away. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if they turned out to be rocket-powered or something.

Perhaps he’s drawing inspiration from the “Tales” cast members?

The closest match I could find was Emil Castagnier, from Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World. His boots are pretty similar, if you squint and view them from the corner of your eyes, no?

Another lethal offering, this time from Tales of the Tempest’s Caius Qualls:

Genis and Sheena, respectively, from Tales of Symphonia:

Their wondrous boots almost rival the king’s pairs, and to cap it all, these pretty “Tales” kids can fly, too, as evidenced by these pictures:

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2 Comments

Kelly

21 December 2011 – 1:20 am

Ooh…yes indeedy you’re right…those boots are pretty awesome….*drools*
At first, I was really offended at you slamming the Olsen twins (I used to be a huge fan of their detective books, lawl), but when you wrote about how they wore FUR…
omg, the poor animals…nightmares of Cruella de Vil come to mind…

Yeah, I never slam people without good reason. These two fur-wearing witches are fair game though, and deserve all the hatred directed at them. They look like chimps, too, especially when they were kids lol. Only, I feel bad saying that ’cause it’s cruel to the poor chimps of the world!