At various times since getting elected, the current White House resident, when not admiring his reflection in the mirror, has likened himself to Lincoln, Reagan, JFK, LBJ, MLK, and, for all we know, Socrates, Bismarck, da Vinci, Isaac Newton, Moses, Gandhi, Michael Jordan, and Ron Jeremy. By now, these comparisons run laughably hollow, reminding us of the socially-awkward married guy at work who, ogling the outrageously attractive office secretary, boasts to a younger, single colleague, “What’s the matter with you kid? If I weren’t married…fuhgeddaboudit.“

The president’s stop at the Islamic Society of Baltimore should probably be closely scrutinized because our puerile president has a tendency to send mixed messages by, perhaps deliberately, paying lip service to lofty ideals while acting in a puzzlingly un-American manner. Investor’s Business Daily, in a decidedly unsubtle editorial, describes the mosque as an organization that ‘graduated a terrorist who plotted to blow up a local Army recruiting station, hired an imam who condoned suicide bombings and blames American “foreign policy” for terrorism.’ Asked to comment on the president’s choice of mosque for the historic occasion, Thusnelda Neusbickle, Professor of Government at Alabama Girls’ Technical Institute and College for Women as well as author of the self-published You Say Moslem, I Say Muslim, Let’s Call the Whole Thing Off, had this to say:

Let’s assume for the sake of argument that the White House thoroughly vetted this mosque. They must have. This is a significant event after all. I’m sure they were all over that place like a drooling, degenerate, ex-con TSA bag screener giving a pat-down-slash-grope to a sex-crazed traveling grandmother. So how did they pick a mosque that was led for a decade-and-a-half by a cleric [BFN: Mohamad Adam El-Sheikh] who once represented an al-Qaida front group? One of two things happened: They either completely whiffed on the vetting, which is possible; after all, this is a Secret Service that thinks it can stiff a prostitute on the bill and she won’t scream murder. Or Obama has no problem with this place’s unsavory history. Which you believe depends on whether you’re a Democrat or Republican.

It’s not clear that the attendees were reassured about their current location. After all, the speaker is an individual so geographically-challenged that until 2008, he may have thought there were 57 US states:

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"I wouldn't buy a used car from a university president. They'll say, 'We're making moves to cut costs,' and mention something about energy-efficient lightbulbs, and ignore the new assistant to the assistant to the associate vice provost they just hired." -Richard Vedder, economist

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