A Life Lived: Elmira man leaves legacy of generosity

Hundreds expressed sympathy for the loss of Ken Koski, an Elmira man who quietly demonstrated generosity and kindness to his family, friends and community.

Ken Koski, of Elmira, was known for his generosity toward his family, friends and coworkers. Though he worked more than 40 hours a week at CAF USA, he always made time for family and friends.(Photo11: KOSKI FAMILY PHOTO)

"He was the kind of person that offered his entire self to everyone," Eric Koski, 44, of Elmira, said of his father. "If someone had asked him for advice or a loan or a tool, not only would he give the advice, he would most likely also stop what he was doing to help them with whatever they were doing.

"He never did anything for recognition," Eric added, pausing for a moment to collect himself. "All he ever wanted was a handshake, a thank you or a hug."

Ken Koski was tinkering around in his tool shed on Elmira's Watercure Hill Road the morning of June 7, waiting for family friend Dennis Poole, who was expected to be over to mow the Koskis' grass. Ken had gone to a nearby gas station to fill up the mower.

"He went out the door in the morning and when he came back, he just walked in the door and looked at me. He sat in the chair and that was it," wife Pat Koski said.

Ken, 69, suffered a heart attack that Saturday morning, which took the family by surprise. He had no indication of heart troubles, and just a year prior had medical work done on his knees. A heart condition would have been detected then, Pat said.

Ken was born June 28, 1944, in Waverly, and Ken's and Pat's love for each other predated high school.

"We were boyfriend and girlfriend when I was 12," Pat said. "I never had anyone else."

The pair eloped out of high school when Pat was 18 and Ken was 20 because the pair faced criticism from her father. They would have celebrated 50 years together last September.

"He was a person of character; his number one loyalty was to his family and employers," Eric said. "He was outgoing up until the day he had his heart attack and died."

Ken went about his generosity quietly, as shown by the 85 entries on his digital obituary. After his death, Pat said the family received more than 400 sympathy cards and the following day, the house was "bursting at the seams" of people who wanted to assist the family.

"Food was overflowing on the counters because there was so much ... We had to direct traffic off the road as they were coming here," Pat said.

Many community members may have known Ken from his work as a facilities manager at CAF USA in Elmira, where he had interactions with hundreds of employees in addition to numerous contractors. He began working at the American Bridge Company at the age of 20. Through the transitions of companies in the building, Ken never left. Thinking of retirement was a hard notion, Pat said.

"He just loved it there. He loved the men he worked with and it was difficult for him to let it go," she said.

He retired a year before his death.

Ken clocked in faithfully every day, often working more than 40 hours a week, but still made time for his family.

"No matter how busy he was helping others or working, he always took an interest in whatever one of us boys' interests were. For me, I was a big fisherman, so he would sometimes take me fishing," Eric said. "For my older two brothers, he took them hunting. One brother was in 4-H and he took an interest in helping him raising goats and cows. He always took time for each one of his kids to devote time to our interests."

One thing that Ken passed down to his sons was a knack of fixing things.

"We always grew up around a father figure who always worked fixing something," Eric said. "Consequently, all of us boys know how to do stuff like fixing cars and plumbing. He left us the ability to be self-sufficient and self-reliant. His character of doing what is right and putting others before yourself has transpired to all of us."

Ken was an avid fisherman who was part of Trout Unlimited. He took care of his flower gardens, often surprising Pat with her favorite flowers — dahlias and peonies. He lent a hand to four of his boys when they began remodeling their respective homes.

Ken Koski was an avid fisherman, often taking his grandchildren out on a lake to teach them the sport and spend time with them. He unexpectedly died from a heart attack June 7, 2014.(Photo11: KOSKI FAMILY PHOTO)

Friends and neighbors could look forward to handmade Christmas wreaths from Ken. He would gather materials from Watercure Hill and assemble them in his shed. Often, he would make at least 60 wreaths.

Neighbor Carl Hayden, chancellor emeritus of the New York State Board of Regents, witnessed Ken's willingness and generosity, living next door for 40 years.

"We have a long driveway that goes through a forest and after a big windstorm one time, a very large tree fell down and totally blocked our driveway," Hayden said. "Ken saw it from the road, and he was there without being asked with another friend within less than an hour and he had not only cut the tree up and freed the driveway, but he had converted the chunks of wood to firewood and loaded it to his truck and brought it down and stacked it."

A more recent act of kindness provides a physical reminder of Ken's legacy for Hayden.

"Just this time last year, there was this stump on the side of our driveway and Ken said to me one day, 'Would you like me to make a seat out of that?' So he took a chainsaw and created a seat out of that stump," Hayden said, noting Ken added an extra touch by carving an "H" on it.

"From time to time, I just stop and sit down and it is a source of really pleasant recollections of Ken."

Perhaps one of his best acts of selflessness was when he and his wife gained a fifth son, Monttryal Jones.

"He was just here," Patricia said of Montrryal. The Koskis took Jones in as one of their own when he was an infant.

"I didn't have a dad, and he was the only dad I ever knew and had," Jones said. "He was strict but was a loving dad. He had a lot of patience with me, more-so than the other boys. He gave me a good home and a good life, and I was very lucky to have him as a dad.

"He was a wonderful role model and I owe everything in my life to him and this family," Jones said. "The only thing I can do now to pay back my dad is to be here for my mom."

Now 25, Montrryal excelled academically at Notre Dame High School, attended several colleges and is now a grinder at Air-Flo in Elmira.

"He was a wonderful example for me and for his children and, I think, for the community," Hayden said. "He led a caring life and it was a tremendous blow to lose him. Ken was a salt-of-the-Earth guy — one of the hardest workers I've ever encountered."