What Does The Song Going Through Your Head When You Wake Really Mean?

I’m sure that I’m going to find out that psychologically speaking I’m really much sicker than I had imagined. For those of you who don’t read my blog on a regular basis (and shame on you) you’d know all about the games my family plays (which could never be confused with reindeer games). One of my family’s absolute favorites is “I’m sicker than you are” it goes a little like this, if I say to my mother, “Oy, I have such a headache today.” Her response normally goes something like this, “Pain? You think you know pain? I was up all night with a head that can only be an aneurysm and from all my tossing and turning, I kept your father up all night who is so tired he doesn’t know if he’s coming or going today and you know he’s not well anyway and I’m sure I’ll be dead by tonight. Did you go to a doctor yet? Yours could be an aneurysm too but mine is probably worse.” So you see my mother always manages to be just a bit sicker than me. But per usual I digress. What happened this morning was not unlike a lot of mornings where I awake with a song playing full blast in my head even though there is no clock radio going. And so I have to wonder what does the song going through your head when you wake really mean? – Don’t Get Me Started!

Now at this time of year I know that you’re probably all thinking that I had some song about a menorah or some shoes that some dirty kid was trying to buy his mother so that she would look good when she met Jesus (see that blog here… http://hubpages.com/hub/I-Know-Im-A-Jew-But-Are-These-New-Christmas-Songs-The-Worst-Or-What- ) but such was not the case. No, this morning I could distinctly hear in my head, “Mama, life had just begun. And now I’ve gone and thrown it all away.” That’s right, Queen’s immortal song, Bohemian Rhapsody and at a most glum portion of the song. Oh no there was no, “Thunderbolts and Lightning, very, very frightening” or even a “Scaramouche will you do the fandango?” No, it was all about life having just begun and being thrown away. Hmmm, could it be my subconscious is trying desperately to tell me something that I don’t want to hear in my “awake” hours?

I had always imagined myself as a rather happy go lucky kind of guy. I would much prefer to be writing this telling everyone that I couldn’t believe it but there it was Wham! In my head singing, “Wake me up before you go, go.” Or perhaps even a little Crystal Gayle singing about brown eyes turning blue or my baby taking the morning train but life ending Freddie Mercury (whose own life ended way too soon)? ARGH. No doubt my therapist from Australia is going to have an absolute field day with this one.

The real problem of course is that I don’t want to go to bed tonight for fear of what will be going through my head at the moment of consciousness tomorrow morning. Perhaps I could try singing the entire score of Annie right before I go to bed so as to maybe end up with something like, “Tomorrow” on the morrow? Or I could do my best to stay asleep until the clock radio actually does wake me with something holiday and sickeningly sweet. I don’t know but I do know it’s scary. That’s right, I said it, scary. Because when your mind is trying to tell you something that you don’t want to hear you have little choice but to listen, right? And as I’m writing this I’m thinking that I want to take even more control of this situation (as only a complete control freak such as myself would do) and I’m hearing the youth Nazi anthem from Cabaret in my head, “Tomorrow Belongs To Me.” Well, let’s hope it does or at the very least I end up with a cheerier refrain in my head because otherwise I really will need to start thinking about my New Year’s resolution including some therapy. (Nighttime musical therapy). what does the song going through your head when you wake really mean? – Don’t Get Me Started!

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Some Like It Scott!An acquired taste, like Tab cola, Some Like It Scott is one gay man's experiences with love, life and things that make him crazy, all done to a musical theatre soundtrack.