Low Rent Cocktail of the Month: Shark Toof

Did you know there are only 23 days left until Shark Week?! Because this is a thing! Get the foam fins ready! Set your DVR to record whatever programming will be on! Make… a cocktail!!!!!

In the spirit of made up holidays and network cable’s ability to hype just about anything, this month I’m priming you with the exact kind of cocktail you need to watch sharks turn into zombies and then rip apart other sharks and then talk about shark feelings. July is right around the corner folks, so let’s do this! Low Rent Cocktail style!

So you spend more time in front of the t.v. and less time in your home bar/kitchen/beach themed utility room, this drink helps you out by starting with a Starbucks run. Depending on where you live, you can either make the base vanilla, or if you’re feeling pretty tropical that day, coconut cream. And since I like to feel tropical every day, you’re going to spike that with a hefty dose of light rum.

But what about the sharks?!

To truly enjoy your shark viewing experience, get out the bag of blue gummy sharks and let those guys dive right into your drink. Feel free to use a cocktail pick for your harpoon.

1 small (“tall”) vanilla or coconut blended beverage (get whipped cream and stir that into the drink too)
2-3 ounces of light rum, such as 10 Cane Rum
handful of Gummy Blue Sharks

Your choice: throw the rum into your plastic cup and add the sharks, or if you’re feeling fancy, pour it all into an oversized Margarita glass and have your sharks swim on top.

The Low Rent Cocktail series is an occasional column on Stir and Strain where the boundaries of “good taste” are pushed to the limit, or more often than not, pushed out the window. Enjoy at your own risk.