The new trailer for CBGB, the story of the iconic New York City punk rock venue, is pretty overwhelming, because there’s so much happening in just 2 minutes of footage. First of all, you’ve got Alan Rickman and Rupert Grint, so all of the Harry Potter fans are going bonkers over that, and then there’s the other little issue of a bunch of young actors portraying everyone from the Ramones to Talking Heads, including Joel David Moore as Joey Ramone and Malin Akerman as Debbie Harry (SWOON).

Peel a few more layers back and you’ve got Foo Fighters drummer Taylor Hawkins playing Iggy Pop, Justin Bartha playing punk legend Stiv Bators and the always lovable Donal Logue doing his thing. Of course, we’re also all very excited to see friend of UPROXX Ryan Hurst and that badass beard back from Opie’s grave.

And throwing Ashley Greene in there never hurts anything.

Also, the director of CBGB is Randall Miller, who brought us the 1992 comedy and FilmDrunkard favorite… Class Act. DAMITA! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA PLAY WITH MY FROG!

I long for the days when films based on real people had to slightly change their names so they wouldn’t get sued. Then we’d have characters in this movie called “Jiffy Pop,” “The Romanes,” “The Talking Faces,” “Stig Gators,” the “Sex Rifles,” and “Debbie Harvey, singer with Peroxide.”

Wow, it’s as if they took the roof off CBGB’s, washed it with acid, scrubbed it with a brillo pad, and poured everyone back into it. Every pic I’ve ever seen of the place (I’ve never been there) has me gagging from the smell. This movie does not evoke the disgustingness.

One thing that movies about underground rock and roll (i.e bands before they make it big, small local venues and so on) is just how completely filthy everything and everyone is. Most of these musicians are literally starving artists. They own, like, one pair of jeans which they’ll wear for their show, and they sweat like hell for the 40 minutes their on stage, and then they’ll get drunk and sleep in their close and get up and go on with the next day…in the same fucking unwashed clothes. And I don’t even mean to say that as though it’s revolting, it’s more of a revelation, but film just will not ever be able to capture that sort of filth.

I know I should be too old to care about such things anymore, but Joey Ramone is fucking rolling in his grave right now. maybe it’s the Party City quality costumes, or the fact that this preview looks like a romantic comedy more than a movie about the birth of New York’s punk scene, or the terrible casting choices…but i am never going to see this movie, not even to hate watch it. i don’t know, possibly getting a director whose only film i have ever heard of was that Kid N’ Play movie that ISN’T House Party to make this wasn’t the hottest choice… or maybe i am just crazy.

The Police were contemporaries with the Clash, the Jam, the Damned et. al. Their later success doesn’t change where they came from, or the fact that they, you know, actually *played* at CBGB … it was the first place they played in America. But don’t let actual facts get in the way of your hipster elitsim.

Sigh … punk at CBGB in the 1970’s wasn’t the hardcore punk we associate with the name today, dude. That didn’t happen until the first wave of guys either died off or got really famous. The “second wave” of punk in the 1980’s was more along the lines of what you are thinking of. CBGB’s in the 70’s was much more arty punk then gobbing punk … Talking Heads, Patti Smith, Television, Richard Hell … these guys were the avant garde of the punk movement.

This movie is perfect. It’s just another perfect example of how every “important” music scene, and the people involved in it, eventually just gets older and cashes in. It’s also a perfect end for the club, for, as I am inferring from Alan Rickman’s character in the trailer, the whole point of the place seemed to be to take a crappy club and exploit it for money in any way possible.

I like a lot of the music that came out of there, but I couldn’t understand why people were freaking the fuck out when CBGB was in danger of being closed a few years ago. Hadn’t produced anybody interesting since the 70’s.