Wait, I thought you were competitive.Kobe Bryant: I am. It’s just part of my family. My entire family played basketball. And my cousins, we used to always play in the summertime, and we used to just talk trash to each other and beat the crap out of each other—that’s kinda where it came from. ’Cause if you lost, they talked bad about you all day.

Was it a basketball-only thing?Kobe Bryant: Nah, video games, swimming—it was just constantly verbally assaulting each other.

So when you’re out there and you’re playing, do you get angry?Kobe Bryant: Sometimes I get angry, but I try to stay neutral. That’s the key. I mean, you can show a burst of emotion, ’cause sometimes that inspires your team; it can inspire you sometimes, too. But for the most part, I try to stay on an even keel, because that’s when you perform your best.

But do you think of it as you being emotional, or is it like a chess game: I’m trying to provoke a reaction from my teammates?Kobe Bryant: Nah, nah, you just play the game. We’ve been together for a long time, so I know what motivates Lamar Odom, what motivates Sasha Vujacic or Pau Gasol. ’Cause I’ve been around them so much. So from that standpoint, it kinda becomes instinctive because you’re around these guys all the time. They become your brothers.

Talk to me about a private failure that wasn’t in the headlines, the thing that just keeps you up at night. Something people can relate to. Not necessarily a public thing, but a thing you twist and turn over.

Kobe Bryant: [Long pause] Dog[expletive]? Like, I hate dog[expletive]. I have a dog and I do not clean the crap outside. It’s a phobia. It drives me crazy. You wake up in the morning and you think, Damn, this big ol’ German shepherd probably just took a crap outside in the yard, and I gotta wake up and go pick it up. That is something that keeps me tossin’ and turnin’. Does that qualify?