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Tuesday, November 12, 2013

On Help: Another Stream of Consciousness Post

I will be the first to admit to you that I don't like people helping me.

Group projects in school? Hated them. Why? Because I hated relying on people to do their part when mine had already been done for weeks, so I just went ahead and did it for them. That's just me. I'm Type A. I know; I admit it freely. My motto: "Why put off tomorrow what you when you can do it today?" {Thanks, Thomas Jefferson.}

I am a go-getter, a "do"-er, and a "yes" person. I will run myself ragged doing things, and I can often be heard saying, "I can do it!" or "It's no problem. I can do it." I'm telling you, I don't like help.

But the one thing I'm slowly realizing in this pregnancy is to just let it go. Let it all go. It will get done...at some point. And it will likely have to get done with help.

Friday night, Brandon and I got into a huge argument. Why, you ask? Because I'd gone to Target and needed him to put the Christmas décor I bought in the attic; he wasn't home when I got home with the groceries, therefore I had to unload them myself; I had two-day-old clothes just sitting in the dryer; and our sheets and duvet needed washing more than I would like to admit. I was just mad that no one was offering to help me.

But one thing my husband said to me {after I'd stopped bawling all over the place} was: "How can people help you if you don't ask them?"

And it hit me. I had to let my pride go and not only allow people to help me, but ask them too, as well.

And another thing he said that hit me even harder: "Just sit back and think to yourself, 'Does this have to be done right now? Or can it wait just a minute?'"

{Notice none of those things we got into an argument about that I was so stressed over had any immediate deadlines...}

That's my worst trait, I think.

I ask people to do something, they don't do it when or how I want them to, and then I just get huffy and pissy and do it myself with a horrible {and I mean horrible} attitude.

After my little "episode" on Friday night, I just made a list - a long one - of baby to-do's. {Y'all should see this massive list...it's pretty hilarious.} On that list I put deadlines, as well as ranked them in order of importance. Because seriously, nothing kicks your butt into gear than knowing a human will be here in a little more than two months. But seriously.

And this weekend, I accomplished: made favors for hostesses; made favors for hospital visitors; wrote thank-you notes; finished a few projects we've been putting off for a while; got paperwork together to order a breast pump through insurance; and made a visit to the hospital to get pre-registration paperwork.

It wasn't easy. And when I say "it," I mean relying on Brandon to help me do things and be patient when it didn't happen right the second I asked him to do it. But magically, it all got done. {By taking a few deep breaths and letting it go...}

Of course, I still have random things on my list like sterilizing baby bottles and pacifiers; finishing packing the hospital bags; and installing the car seat...but my list is much shorter today than it was three days ago. And boy, does that feel really, really good.