Monday, January 21, 2013

My swimming ritual

1. Drink Ginger Tea & crank the heat in the car on the way to West Vancouver
2. Put in my earplugs, pull on my cap and goggles, and safety pin thermometer to my bathing suit
3. Get undressed, pull the very attractive, buff coloured, floor length fleece poncho over my head
4. Don the similarly attractive, buff coloured Crocs and head down to the beach
5. walk in to my waist, splash my back, shoulders and face and then immerse myself to my neck. Slowly dunk my face in and out and flap my arms like a chicken.

- Swim -

6. Get out, put the Crocs and fleecy poncho back on and walk up to the car. Wonder why, for the hundredth time, I ended up with matching fleece poncho and Crocs.
7. Worry that people will think I planned the items to match because I think of them together an "an ensemble"
7. Take off my bathing suit and dry off with a towel underneath the fleecy poncho turned changing tent (seriously, this thing is awesome)
8. Pull a toque over my swim cap. I don't remove the swim cap until I've warmed up considerably
9. Put on underwear, fleece lined sweat pants and Ugg wannabes, more ugly but utilitarian foot wear. No laces that numbed fingers can't wrangle, and lined with sheepskin thereby eliminating the need for socks.
10. Pull on a sweatshirt. In my books this is the only time being bra-less is acceptable. My fingers just don't have the dexterity required to handle the clasp.
11. Get in the car, crank the heat and shiver my butt off. Think of all the pasta I've earned.
12. I do have gloves, scarf and overcoat in the car which I sometimes put on and I sometimes leave off, depending on how hot the car is.
13. Crack open the big thermos of ginger tea and slowly sip myself back to warmth.

This routine never varies. When I get out, my brain is working quite slowly and if I had to think about where to find my clothes or what to wear I would waste time just standing around thinking. Because I do the same thing in the same order ever time, it has become second nature. When he can be there Matt times the swim and the shivering and warms the car for me.