Eurovision hopefuls … Joe Woolford and Jake Shakeshaft, who are competing against five other acts in UK heats for this year’s Eurovision.
Photograph: Nora Ryan/BBC/PA

Eurovision: You Decide

7.30pm, BBC4

Who will have the honour of finishing 19th for Britain in this year’s Eurovision Song Contest? Following a run of debacles involving singers handpicked by the Beeb’s top pop hepcats, now it’s our responsibility again. Six acts – Ken Bruce revealed them on Monday morning on Radio 2 – perform live at the Kentish Town Forum in London, overseen by host Mel Giedroyc. The last time there was a public phone vote, in 2010, Britain chose Josh Dubovie, who then came last in the final. Bonne chance! Jack Seale

Mr Selfridge

9pm, ITV

It’s a big week for Harry as he expands his retail empire by announcing he’s buying Whiteley’s. Mr Grove (Tom Goodman-Hill) feels his days are numbered as the younger generation sweeps in, and when he has a health scare he has no choice but to go home and be taken care of by Miss Mardle. A closer look at the Whiteley’s accounts reveals the kind of debts that could ruin the business, but will Harry raise enough capital to cover them? Meanwhile, the staff are shocked by a tragedy. Hannah Verdier

Comedy Playhouse: Hospital People

10.35pm, BBC1

Playing everyone from an alternative therapy-obsessed porter to a chaplain who’d rather be a comedian, Tom Binns takes on multiple parts in a mockumentary pilot charting life at the fictional Brimlington Hospital. It’s nowhere near edgy enough, but there are some good gags nonetheless. Manager Susan Mitchell discusses MRSA rates: “If you come into this hospital with a heart condition, you’re going to die of a heart condition, not pick up a secondary infection along the way.” Jonathan Wright

Artsnight – Lynn Barber

11pm, BBC2

The culture show tonight lets Lynn Barber work her magic on two American comedians who have made it in the UK. It’s a “tears of a clown” premise. Both Rob Delaney (a Twitter phenomenon-turned-UK success story in Catastrophe) and Ruby Wax (a once-ubiquitous comic/talkshow host) have struggled with personal problems, which inform their work. For Wax it was depression. For Delaney, alcoholism and clinical depression – subjects dealt with in his stand-up, and alluded to in Catastrophe. John Robinson

Stan Lee’s Lucky Man

9pm, Sky1

Stan Lee must marvel indeed that with his 100th birthday not so far away, he is even now in the thick of TV comic book hero action. Tonight, Harry and Suri use the powers of Harry’s bracelet to help out in a case involving a mutilated body in a building scheduled for demolition. They unearth links to a conspiracy run by some of London’s most powerful people. Harry also makes a discovery when he happens to run into an ex-colleague who worked on Eve’s mother’s murder case. Holy coincidence! David Stubbs

NCIS: New Orleans

9pm, Channel 5

One helluva New Orleans cameo pops up at the end of tonight’s episode, the first in a new season. But before we get to that, who’s blown up some soldiers on the Crescent City Bridge and why? Well, perhaps there’s a clue in the episode title, Sic Semper Tyrannis: the phrase shouted out by John Wilkes Booth as he shot President Lincoln. Dwayne Cassius Pride (Scott Bakula) puts his life on the line in an undercover operation as he tracks the mysterious assailants and tries to retrieve the guided missile they stole. Ali Catterall

Forbidden History

9pm, Yesterday

Jamie Theakston is back for another series of the hokey Forbidden History, going all Indiana Jones (no leather or bullwhips, sadly) in search of the Ark of the Covenant. A range of Fortean types speculate enthusiastically on the dimensions of the ancient wooden casket, what it might contain, and where it disappeared to, with Theako heading to Ethiopia on his quest to find it. Could it be that it’s in fact residing in a small chapel in the northern town of Axum guarded by a succession of virginal monks? Ben Arnold

Film choice

Mad Max: Fury Road

(George Miller, 2015) 3.30pm, 8pm, Sky Movies Premiere

The dustbowl car chases, flame-throwing outlaws and heavy metal paraphernalia are all present and correct in Miller’s reboot of his own post-apocalyptic actioner. There’s more of a female focus this time round, however, as Tom Hardy’s brooding loner Max takes a back seat to Charlize Theron’s scene-stealing, skinhead Imperator Furiosa and her runaway harem. Simon Wardell

Philomena

(Stephen Frears, 2013) 9pm, BBC2

Frears’s superb emotional drama is based on the true story of Philomena, the courageous middle-aged Irishwoman who decided to trace the baby stolen from her by the Catholic nuns of the penitential Magdalene laundries in the 1950s. Steve Coogan is excellently low-key as Martin Sixsmith, the former BBC correspondent who accompanies her on her search in the US and Ireland, while Judi Dench gives a tragicomic acting masterclass as the doughty Philomena. Paul Howlett

A Beautiful Mind

(Ron Howard, 2001) 10.40pm, W

Howard’s portrait of Nobel prize-winning mathematician and paranoid schizophrenic John Forbes Nash turns a complex, conflicted soul into a standard Hollywood hero with charming chat-up lines (“Ritual requires that we proceed with a number of platonic activities before we can have sex”) and an occasional delusion thrown in. It won four Oscars, though. PH

Today’s best live sport

Ski Jumping: The World Cup From Almaty in Kazakhstan. 11.45am, Eurosport 1