A piece of some practice in an open C tuning. Nothing rehearsed so it's like an improv, and I'm trying to get some harmonics there but it's pretty sloppy. Also, I lost the tempo and slowed down by accident. This was many years ago.

Two audio recordings of some drum practice with a bag of weed and a camera, many years ago. I played the drums over the stereo and didn't mic anything, so the sound quality is horrible. Be warned. These are only the parts of the song I didn't completely mangle..I was just learning them. Take the treble out if you can.. it's really bad. Earphones advised.

Now this is strange. Like dark circus music of something. It's less of a song and more of a collage of phrasing, and not something I rehearsed, so an improv as well. My high E string wasn't in tune either so I apologize. There is a 10/8 and an 11/8 in there as well, and that little diminished scale I got from Fripp. This is about eight years ago.

Two fret tapping tracks overlapped. At 0:38 you'll hear the second track merge with the first. A few seconds into this I just barely fall out of time, but I get it back on a moment later.

Now I screwed up here also. Maybe I was stoned, I can't remember. The measures run 7/4-8/4-7/4-8/4, but the last three I stopped the pattern and played three 7/4s, and it sounds bad. I don't know why I did that...it fucks the flow up.

When I was looping the tracks my windows aquarium screen saver came on. Somehow the sound of the bubbling water was recorded. Since there are two of the same tracks overlapped over the sound of that water, I thought the name The Same River Twice would be appropriate. Although, again, this was just some exprimenting.. nothing rehearsed.

Eleven years ago Paul, a good guitarist and friend of mine, resolved to buy a roland synth to take the place of the bassist and keyboardist we didn't have. These are some clips from that afternoon, the roland fresh out of the box. He didn't know what he was doing yet with the thing, and I wasn't the greatest drummer back then either, so bear with us.

All this stuff was just bits and pieces of what I happened to save. It is unfortunate that I can't give you anything better. The CDs of some band stuff (both live and studio) were lost years ago, and I haven't had a cam in over eight years.

This concludes Zoot Allures's Not So Greatest Hits, Volume 1.

I know some of you play an instrument other than the skin flute, so don't be shy if you suck, or overly modest if you jam.

If you do not play an instrument, I advise you as Zappa did: abandon your unmusical ways.

(I have a couple pic videos I made over some songs which I'll post next.)

Rocky had like four DUIs on his record so he permanently lost his license. He a had a little battery operated scooter he would ride down the side walk to get to the job every morning. He was my right hand man on the job site. I could give him three helpers, turn him loose on the roof and he'd have the thing framed in the blink of an eye. He was also able to plywood a 10/12 roof without using toe-boards. When you find a framer like this you keep him.

The only problem with Rocky was that his scooter battery was constantly dying on the way to work. He'd call and ask me to come pick him up. On one occasion I couldn't go get him because my van was being used to pick up some building materials. His missed work that day and felt bad about it. Like really bad. I guess he didn't know I wouldn't fire him even if he missed a week. You don't fire guys like Rocky.

Oh, I forgot one. I put together a xylophone rhythm on the roland synth and then played drums and guitar over it. One of the first times I actually tried to write something on the roland so it isn't very good. That thing comes with a manual the size of a dictionary and I wasn't about to read the whole thing. Luckily I figured out to do this much with it. Later on Paul and I got better with it, but I don't have anything recorded from that period.

This is the war song of the Coleoptera. I would have rather mounted a little helmet cam on a beetle and sent him into battle, to get real footage for this. Because I could not I had to use lame pics again.

wow a video of the outlaw philosopher zoot allure himself playing guitar like a beast. and a cigarette dangling from his mouth no less. bad ass, brutha. joie de vivre son. you are really good in that style. the piece with the roland and drums with the beetle is sick, too. i didn't listen to the wiki ones because don't want to upload software or sign up. great drums on the game show piece, too.

i didn't listen to the wiki ones because don't want to upload software or sign up

Damn dude, you gotta hear How the West Wasn't Won (the one in an open C) and the Worker Bees one in 7/8; it represents the bee's waggle dance. I think you can just open the file without downloading it. Click on the link and you'll see what I'm talking about. I don't think you need to sign up or upload anything to do so.

Wait a minute, it's doing something different now. Three weeks ago when you clicked download a box appeared giving you the option to either save file or open file. Now it's downloading it automatically. Wtf? Who's knows what's going on here?

And if it makes everyone feel any better, I don't know the first thing about uploading viruses or anything like that. My shit is clean. You have my word.