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I remember my 1st episode as if it was yesterday. Just thinking about this brings me to tears… I guess this week’s Grazia Magazine is right to title my little tribute to The Wild, MINNIE: Tears As The Wild Ends

I walked on set and the director announced my arrival like some old British royal movie. LOL

Connie Ferguson, who I now call “Ma” came up to me, YES ‘came up to me’ and welcomed me on set with the warmest hug. Telling that this day will mark the beginning of a life long relationship… and she was right. She is more than a fellow actor, my current producer – she has become my mother in so many ways. With Ma around – without me conveying to her or anyone – she knew instinctively when I was not in the right space and would quietly tell everyone “Mouse is not having a good day. Be gentle with her.”

I’ll never forget my instant connection with my big sis’ Lele (who insists on calling me “MANA”). We still have our laughs and to this day we crack up together over the silliest things. You see Lele, surprised me by asking me for my mother’s number and I gave it to her with no more thought of her request. That Sunday she gave me a call and said “hold on there’s someone who wants to speak to you.” It was my mother. I cried at that gesture because I had not been home in over a month and through our conversations she knew how much I missed my parents. Her selfless act to take time out of her schedule in Durban, to go and visit my parents was the best gift to me at that moment.

On that very first day, I met the beauty that is Gail Mabalane – I was, and still am in awe of this woman’s beauty. Beneath that beauty is a fun character who just laughs for days. Oh and she got me addicted to energy drinks. By midday we’d be on our second cans. Redbull made so much money out of us…

Keenan Arrison… sigh… We met an within NO time you and I were in a pool, “naked” and making out. That was the scene that my dad was not too impressed with LOL. But he understands…I think. Tumisho Masha, who came all the way to Durban for my surprise 22nd birthday – which he almost gave away by asking me about it…

Mam’ Clem – immediately turned me into a weekly customer for her famous bottled chakalaka. From Oom Ian I always got old tales – some were too outlandish – but I always enjoyed our talks. Josette… my friend, my homegirl… I’ll be with you stateside sooner than we both thought…

The threesome or lack there of with Aubrey and Zak was a lot funnier than it looked. We got on soooo well and Zak if you’re reading this we MUST have lunch next week. LOL

Cast and crew were the best people as a collective that I have worked with we were together all the time we became a proper family. They even gave me my nickname ‘Mouse’ which has followed me to the new production I’m shooting for Mzansi Magic, called Rockville.

Well done to the Best Directing Team at this year’s SAFTA’s Johnny, Krijay, Alex and Gert I love you all and learnt so much as an actor from each of you.

The Wild showed the country I can act which is the biggest obsession of my life!!! I will always be grateful for Zintle, she was such a complex character with so many layers but most of all, possessed a great heart.

What a rough 2weeks I’ve experienced!!! This media attention really took its toll on little old me. Although I have not disclosed who I am or am not involved with, a picture does speak a 1000 words… LOL

More than the uncomfortable invasion of my privacy and the not-so-common paparazzi style of journalism conveyed in papers and magazines these past two weeks, what upset me most was the blatant lack of patriotism – in the quest to get the “scoop”!

With Bafana Bafana in the biggest tournament since FIFA 2010, in fact with the entire nation expecting them to repeat the heroics of the team of 1996 – instead of supporting them during AFCON we choose to entertain distracting tabloid stories. Our country’s pride is being displayed – in the form of soccer – and we’re acting like its just a random match on a random day.

I think its time we adopt the mentality of the people of the USA. Where they believe in and fully support everything American. No matter the speculation, the drama; they remain true patriots until the very end. Where national pride is concerned – everything comes to a standstill – this is evidenced even in the UK. Here’s my thing; a story is a story. This one littered with faceless and nameless “close” sources. But do we now put that before our own pride as a nation? Where we have welcomed the continent’s top teams.

It saddens me to see a player’s injury being the butt of social media jokes and becomes a national mockery. One thing I learnt from my recent interview with Tony Kgoroge – by Nicky Greenwall, for Screentime – was that we live in a different society from pre-1994. This society we live in does not embody the saying “an injury to one, is an injury to all” that comrades used to have. We are all about one-manship, screw the rest. When one falls or faultes – that’s an opportunity to mock and ridicule them – all while expecting them to bring their A-Game forward.

I fully support Bafana Bafana in the AFCON 2013 and I put my country’s pride in their feet, as they’ve been selected amongst many to do the job. Let us, as a nation dubbed to embody the spirit of UBUNTU, embody that spirit.

With the full support of from us, as their fellow country men and women, our boys will go out there not trying to prove the nation that they can, but showing the continent and the world that we WILL!!!

I know this blog has been a long time coming. I started penning it on Saturday evening, but had to stop as it brought forward so many emotions. But, its now finished and ready for you to read… I did say you guys will get a different side of me through my blog so here goes…

On the last day of high school, with my some of my Northlands Girls High buddies

In high school, I was a ‘roamer’, I was friends with so many different clicks. Here I saw how extraordinary the power of young girls could be. When girls combine their powers, they’re a force to be reckoned with; they can take down their teachers, render some social outcasts and can be so manipulative. Oh and I went to an all girls school…

With another dear friend. See how long my natural hair is. *wink*

I learnt early on, the skill of avoidance. I didn’t want to be part of the “good” or “bad” side hence I became a ‘roamer’. I threw myself into my books, sports and any extra mural activity I could get into. One of these “avoidance” mechanisms, for me was entering pageants, which actually brought me more attention and name calling than I wanted. The great thing about being a pageant girl was that, I, better than anyone else, I got to understand girls’ dynamics.

With my “twin” Khabonina Shabangu, @ the many pageants we entered together.

The pageant world teaches you to be best friends with the person you’re competing with. Its pretty warped if you ask me, but it had a lot to do with how I view female dynamics and it was the best training I could have ever asked for to deal with the entertainment industry. Look, this in no way means that I view everyone as my competition. I was brought up to believe that I was the only obstacle to reaching my goal and therefore I compete with only myself.

With Diana Maphapho @ the Shimmer Motions cover shoot

The many shoots and events we attend as entertainers, take me back to those pageant and high school days. Where I used to sit and observe the room dynamics and how best to find my fit in the room. The pageant world also taught me, the importance of sharing. In those years, my mom was a working wife, mother and part time student. She couldn’t be there for most of my contests, my dad had to go with, but could not come into the dressing room. My fellow contestants’ mothers would all faff around me, helping out to “beautify” me. When I won, beating their precious daughters to the crown. I’d see the pride in their eyes, as they had a hand in “prettifying” the queen. Pageants taught me that if something is yours you’ll get it and if not, it was just not meant to be.

With Di-Di @ the Miller Music Tour West Shoot

In the two years I’ve been in this industry, there’s nothing I enjoy more than being in a room full of personalities, as it allows me to “read the room”. This to me is always very interesting and the drama comes in hilarious under tones, especially knowing some of the dynamics in the room.

Guys, the truth is we’re not all BFFs. Some people have worked harmoniously together and then there are those who haven’t. Some like each other. Some just don’t. Its real life dynamics under the umbrella of the “GLITZY” entertainment world.

Getting all glammed by Mpumi Ntintili-Sinxoto @ my private shoot

I remember the first time I was in that space. I felt nervous, shy and a sense of “I shouldn’t be here.” I didn’t know how to conduct myself in a room of so many stars, so I naturally went to my comfort zone; I had laughs and great convo’s with the make-up and hair stylists.

The industry is tricky; you always need to be aware of your space. You need to know your place. Never over estimate it, and never underestimate it either! Almost everyone at some point gets it wrong. I know I have at times. And the only way to get it right is to get there for the task at hand, be you and move on. Most times we forget that relationships and friendships are forged best when there has been a natural gravitation towards each other. Relationships cannot be created or forced in order to play up for the cameras. On the off chance that I find myself not “clicking” with someone, I switch to professional mode – as I’m there to do a job and a harmonious environment always guarantees great results.

Izak Letele doing his thing @ my shoot

The thing I’ve come to learn is that, in this industry, we are all good girls. Our problem is that early on in our careers and throughout, we get fed a lot of B.S. that deceives us into thinking and seeing each other as competition. This is utter rubbish. Its time we learnt to run our own race. To stay in the lane one has been allocated or chosen for themselves. There’s a reason why those lanes are not marked and shaped in the same way. As an athlete at school, and now watching from my couch, I see too many athletes on the running field being disqualified for stepping onto another racers’ lanes. Even the fastest man on the planet, Usain Bolt, found himself on the disqualified list at last year’s World Championships.

Chilling with Lorna Maseko backstage @ Gauteng Sports Awards

My experiences along the way have taught me to always remain true to who I am. Never forget the journey that led me to this part of the race – the helping hands along the way. Thus I will never not whip out an extra pair of earings, that I have that best suite the next girl’s outfit. As all those years ago, it was people’s helping hands that ensured I reached the next level of my race.

@ the end of the day – Minnie Dlamini is the only one I compete with…

So ladies, its about time we used our combined powers to kick arse – continue running our races as individuals. But how awesome would it be, if we had each other to point out the shortcuts, the curves, the bumpy and smooth roads – but most importantly have each other as voices of encouragement when we get tired. To wait at the finishing line with a some bubbly to laugh and celebrate each other’s milestones. Well… A girl’s gotta dream…

My Fridays are mostly spent reading newspapers, magazines and surfing the net in preparation for the METRO FM EXPERIENCE CHART SHOW that I co-host, every Saturday (12-3pm). This past Friday I went about things differently. My focus in reading was not just on the latest buzz in the pop and celebrity culture. I read on general and political news. Yes guys, my brain does stretch that far…

We always view politicians as these distant people who, in my view, live separate lives to everyday men. Some people go as far as saying that “politicians should not mix with ordinary folk’. This got me thinking on the leaderships we vote into power. What do we look at and what are we presented with on a human level?

Joyce Banda – Malawian President

One of the things that grabbed me was Joyce Banda, whose story just pulled at my heartstrings. She was recently elected as President of Malawi, one of the poorest countries in the world. In true leadership style, she decided to downsize the government’s car fleet and wait for it… she SOLD her presidential JET. Unheard of right? This highlighted to me in practice, what “For the people. By the people” truly means. It was while reading this story that I remembered why I do what I do.

I am in this industry I love because I love my craft. Yes it comes with the fame and riches (sometimes). For relevance, we’re always on a mission to bag the next cover, massive endorsement deal and always looking at ways to set yourself apart from others in the industry. In this story I remembered, I tend to forget at times, that I do this to evoke an emotion. An emotion of excitement, healing and an escape for the people at home watching. Its selfless acts, such as Banda’s, that we need to experience and witness more often to get us back to the basics.

US President, Barrack Obama playing his favorite sport, basketball

In the same reading I was doing, I was struck by an article on US President Obama’s recent visit to one of their country’s top entertainment talk shows, The View. The US elections are coming up and Obama is seeking a second term in office. One of the things that have always got me interested in the US election campaign period is how politics tends to meet with entertainment. And I term this POLITAINMENT! Now imagine President Zuma having a sit down with Kuli Roberts on Headline and Phat Joe on Real Goboza – that would make for great television. Don’t you think?

President Jacob Zuma in full Zulu traditional gear and doing the traditional dance

Maybe we do need that kind of election process in Mzansi, as that might give us a lighter side to our candidates, that will better inform us on the type of leaders we elect into office – either than the stern statesmen-like view we’re only presented with. Maybe it’s due to this lack of POLITAINMENT that we’re in shock when Msholozi does his dance – because we’re never shown that side on an entertainment platform.

President Obama with the ladies from The View

What also got me on the Obama story was that on The View he had to take a quiz. One of the questions being; “which celeb was married for 72 days.” He answered correctly. “Kim Kardashian”. Then he was asked; “Which pop singer recently gave birth?” He didn’t know. The answer was. “Jessica Simpson”. LOL, George Bush might have known that!

Jessica Simpson and Kim Kardashian

So Obama knows who the Kardashians are but obviously not the Simpsons. In his defence he said; “I’m a basketball fan and I knew who Kris Humphries was married to.” Personally, I just think he’s a secret Kardashian fan!!!

This sparked a thought. With our separation of politics and entertainment – how much influence do we as entertainers, with our legions of following, have in the election process in our country? Would President Zuma have been able to respond when asked; “Which male pop star recently got married in Cape Town?” or does he know that Sophie Ndaba is getting divorced or Bonang and Euphonik are in court. Better yet, does he know about my rumored engagement to Bafana’s number 1 goalkeeper, Itumeleng Khune and my rumored pregnancy?

Wouldn’t his response to the above be interesting? What’s relevant enough for the president of a nation to be aware of or interested in?

Life is about human connections and we tend to lose sight of that along the way. Entertainment provides a platform for anyone, including politicians, to connect with people on an emotional level. Look, at every point we all lead; whether it’s at home, at school, on the sportsfield… you get my drift…

Ok look over the years I’ve always gotten a lot of flack for my body, basically being too curvy compared to my peers.

Back in my beauty pageant days, I was always the ‘thickest’ in my age group. I’ve never been over weight and even at my skinniest my body shape has never really changed. I had booty, thighs and an itty bitty tiny waist – the boobies came about a year or so ago.

I’m not for 1 second going to act like it never bothered me. It did! In swimwear fashions shows I used to do every holiday, I was always the most covered up. Pageant organizers constantly told me; “Minnie you need to loose weight.”

At school I was very athletic. I featured in about four different sports. So going on crash diets was not something I did. I just kept my body firm and ensured that it remained in proportion. Sports became my source of refuge. Somehow, I still got the modeling bookings and I won the pageants that I entered (Little Miss South Africa in 2002). For me this was more validation that I didn’t really have to crash diet – Ya, that’s how much I loved my food.

It wasn’t until 2003 when I saw Beyonce’s first solo video ­- Crazy In Love – I saw a body on mainstream TV that resembled mine. Her body shape was seen as sexy, hot and healthy. It was then I found appreciation for the body I have.

When I got in into the entertainment industry, in 2010, everyone raved about how healthy and curvy my body was. People were saying I was a true depiction of the average SA woman. Here’s the thing about that period; I was only 19. There’s a stage in a woman’s life, when your body does “funny” things. You gain, you loose. Its truly where your body tries to find its proper shape and if you don’t do anything about it (like me) it does its own thing… Yeah I got big! But the difference this time was I enjoyed the weight gain! My boobs grew, my booty grew, I was just filling out in the right places and I loved it! Then came the pressure to lose the weight. People started comparing me to skinnier girls in the industry and were being really ugly about it. But in the same breath, many women loved it and were feeling more and more confident in showing their skin. That, boosted my confidence – it made me feel really special. And of course the much welcomed male attention *wink*

The moral of my story though is I’ve never been naïve to the fact that I have “junk in my trunk” and in the last year, probably more so than I’ve ever had. My recent US trip, took my body image to another level. Not only are people in the States a lot bigger but what we, here at home what we glorify as thick and beautiful is actually much bigger than we think. At the MTV movie awards, model Amber Rose walked right past me and honey is THICKER than THICK! I mean really big – but nonetheless a true African beauty.

Over the years I’ve learnt to dress for my body shape. I dress to highlight my best assets. I make sure that whatever I’m wearing is form fitting – meaning that even if I’m not showing leg or cleavage – my body is shown off. Women should celebrate their bodies – as long you’re fit and healthy thin or thick! It’s the only one you have! Let’s start celebrating the diversity in our bodies and finding the beauty in what already exists!!!

Recently, I have been tip toeing around the conversation of weave/extensions being just my own hair and a lot of sentiments have been expressed about the Motions Oil Sheen Spray advert, that I feature in, since I am the brand ambassador. So it got me thinking of my next blogging topic, Minnie & Her Hair. Firstly, the running ad, is about the spray – which is part of the Motions aftercare range. I use it on my weaves, and when I don’t have a weave on – I use it on my own natural hair. The spray is for natural (virgin) hair, relaxed hair and of course the weave. This is just the beginning phase of the campaign and as it develops you’ll get to see so much more of the range on offer. Oh and I do have very naturally beautiful, healthy hair underneath my weave.

I often hear ladies expressing their concern wearing weaves/extensions keeps you from “developing” a relationship with your hair or hiding what you were naturally born with. My take on this is that we all have our own ways of doing things, and everyone’s hair has a different story. So at the end of the day, I guess that we can’t assume someone has an issue just because they decide to weave it up or they go natural! Personally, I wear weaves as a form of protective styling due to the amount of styling done to my hair for the television shows that I am on (The Wild and Mzansi Insider) and the various magazine & promo shoots that I go to. On a daily and weekly, my hair is exposed to heat through blow drying, straighteners & heat curlers. All this can lead to damage and breakage of my natural hair. In the, almost two years, that I have been in the industry, I’ve found that my natural hair simply grows faster when left alone, which is through the protective styles that I do. So yeah, its a way, that works for me to simply retain my precious length & keep it healthy looking.I call my weaves my hair because, whatever form I choose – its attached to my natural hair and is an enhancement and complements every inch of my glorious mane when I do get to show it off. Plus I pay for it – therefore I own it (LOL)

At the end of the day, I am so much more than my hair. Whats inside of me is my identity. Just because the next person’s decided to go for dreadlocks doesn’t give me the right to assume I know what is going on, on the inside. Only God knows what the inside is like – because that’s what He deals with rather than the outside.