Bez MP to dance through Prime Minister’s question time

Former Happy Mondays and Black Grape dancer Bez will add a little bit of spice to Prime Minister’s question time by dancing through the entire parliamentary session whilst shaking a pair of Maracas, should he succeed in his bid to be elected independent Member of Parliament for Salford in 2015.

Bez, real name Mark Berry told us “The Happy Mondays were going nowhere until I jumped on stage and accompanied them by dancing through their entire set whilst shaking a pair of maracas. When they split up, it’s arguable that Sean Ryder wouldn’t have felt confident to form Black Grape if I hadn’t offered to dance through all their songs whilst shaking a pair of maracas. It’s up to me to do the same in parliament and thus bring public confidence back into the political system.”

Though it seems likely that Bez may be more likely to shake his maracas to more left wing views, he has made it quite clear that he is standing as an independent. “To be honest I’ve just taken a couple of Es and as a result have agreed to go into coalition with the Conservatives, Labour and UKIP. They’re all great!” he explained.

Bez may find he has some competition from within the parliamentary ranks. Fuelling rumours of political dance stand off, Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg said “We are the coalition party and if it means us dancing and shaking a pair of maracas more then we’ll do it. I’ve already got Vince Cable wearing a tutu and Danny Alexander getting lessons of Michael Flatley as we speak.”

Bez’s campaign manager has confirmed that he has definitely agreed to do something or other in 2015.