Okay, that new woman he was dating, Natalya, made me want to know one thing….

You were put on a bus it seems?

What the hell happened to Jaina Hudson? We know she is the white rabbit, but I’m pretty sure that Bruce hasn’t picked that up yet. They implied she was behind everything or at least deeply involved in the first 8 issues and she just dropped off the face of the earth. And I know one of those issues was the night of owls event, but really? They were setting her up to be his new girlfriend? Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad they don’t have him dating a super villain again because that gets annoying. Because it has been done, a lot. Like, every woman he dates wants to kill him. I feel like the league should step in at some point because one of their top people self-destructs a lot. Or at least have league approved girlfriends because clearly he can’t be trusted, about to get crude, where he puts his dick or who he chooses to put it in.

A Superhero that gets turned on by evil? That is Batman in a nutshell. I would be happen if he put the two together, I kinda like her, a new super villain shows up in Gotham, I bet they are one in the same. But something tells me that isn’t what happened.

One-Who is this bitch? Two- This is kinda creepie when you remember Damian is homeschooled and they are in the living room. She is naked under that sheet.

I think the writers forgot about her honestly. She was built up in issue 8 as being the one who got everything started up to that point, and he just loses interests in her? Really? When has Batman lost interest in someone who was so tied into the case? Scarecrow still running around and this woman is helping him? Nope, don’t need to look for them. I don’t think I can think of anyone that has happened too. And even when he gets wind that maybe, maybe these women aren’t the best for him, he still dates them. I mean, look at Jezebel Jet. He had a hint that she was working for someone to get him when she made the comment that she understood him. On their first date. And still dated her until the black Glove tried to bury him. After that, he was still trying to save her. He is a bit retarded when it comes to people with tits. The bigger, the more retard, I noticed. Clearly we know what he likes.

Dawww….That is just sweet.

That being said, the whole, him being sweet to that little girl was freaking adorable. You always wanna think of Batman as some big scary dude fighting for the little guy. You never really see him with the little guy and yet again on this blog, I find myself calling Batman cute. What is that, 4 times? But it was nice to see, that maybe, just maybe, he isn’t always the big scary guy on the block but a feeling human being.

Oh Damian, just grow some tits. Then maybe your dad will give a shit about you.

Of course the next set of panels is him ignoring the shit out of his son, so you know, back to being an unfeeling ass. I know, I know, he has tunnel vision, and all he is seeing is the case, and everyone around him can fuck off. But what pisses me off is he is ignoring his child, and going after some woman. I mean, think about this for a second, his son is talking about working on his rage issues, and trying to get more advice for how to do that, and Bruce flat out ignores him. He goes and see his girlfriend because of a charity event, where she is suppose to the date. That is father of the year shit right there. (She dumps his ass, realizing that he is the shitty father ever? Nope. Because she was sick of waiting around for him, and being ignored. So he pisses off his son and loses the girl.)

Not that Batman has ever been a great parent. He sure as fuck hasn’t. But he knows Damian has some serious fucking issues and like I said before, maybe he should do something about that. Or at the very least, spend some fucking time with him. I mean, the only time they did something normal was in Batman and Robin #8. And I feel like that is the only time that they have. But what is even sadder, is he is the most loving parent Damian has. That kid is fucked.

This is my open letter to John and the Alphas. And yes, I know they aren’t real. It’s a joke.

Really John, really? You thought that they would let you off with Life? Come on, the Alpha are clearly playing by their own damn rules. Plus if they did, there would be no reason to fight. We have to have a WAR DAMNIT!

Part of the problem is that John assumed that they worked like the same way that our courts worked. I don’t know what gave him that idea, but it is what it is. These are people who are sitting outside of the regular corp. I don’t think they have any rules they have to follow. Hell, it is implied that they don’t even have to follow the Guardian’s rules. So clearly, John is carrying the idiot ball around. Because it is keeping him warm? I don’t know.

And yet again, I have a question. John kills another Lantern, he deserves death….Hal kills a Guardian, he gets his ring taken away, and sent home….Does this now seem a little unfair? Why didn’t the Alphas go after Hal? He killed one of the leaders, shouldn’t he be brought to justice for that? Am I silly to feel it is a race thing? Both are good Lanterns, Both are human, but the different between the two is strictly racial. So, yea….This seems a little racist to me DC.

Thou Kirrt’s family did have a right to be pissed off. John did sit there and lied to them about what happened. I mean, that is having your love ones killer for dinner. I don’t understand why he was holding an idiot ball when he saw them and the truth came out. Are you retard John?

They aren’t very good vilians.

And the Alphas’’ are afraid to kill? Really? They want to make John an example not to kill don’t have the ability to do it? And I love how they are like, we will get someone else to do it. Because you can deal out the sentences but you can’t do the deed. GROW SOME BALLS ALPHAS, Please? You are being set up to be the villains, could you be a little less pussy please? Otherwise this arc won’t be fun. You aren’t complex, you aren’t that interesting, you could at least be totally dicks. Just a suggestion you should take.

You know you are a shitty villian when Guy is telling you how you should be doing it.

Also when Guy shows up with food. That should have been the hint to John that shit was going to go down.

And I can’t wait to see the fall out.

I feel like I should have saved this for funny panel friday…oh well.

And I have been fighting with the internet all freaking morning, so this is on the short side. Sorry. And look, I had to go to Starbucks to update. AND I HATE STARBUCKS! This is what I do for love.

I was sick all weekend, so didn’t have much of a chance to get on to starting this blog post…so we are going to get another drive by. Sorry. But it is about women, so how can it be bad?

Wonder Woman #10

Well, she is a bamf

One of the things I’m really enjoying about the New Wonder Woman stuff. I know a lot of people are upset by it, for whatever reason they have, but I’m really digging it.

The reason is because I really enjoy Greek Mythos, so seeing the cannon go back to that opens realms of possibilities. Especially if they are going to bring in other Demi-Gods. There are some great ones to choose from. Example, one of the demi-god sons of Poseidon, could not be harmed on dry land. How would one defeat him? Well, in one of the versions of Theseus tale, he defeats him by holding him off the ground and stabbing him in the neck. Yea. I can’t wait to see what comes out next.

I also like how Wondy is a little bit of a punk in this. And hear me out, but after she finds out that she is Zeus’s daughter she goes to a club in London….a Club in London that looks like a punk club. And this isn’t the first time she shown listening to punk music. She gets a taste in Odyssey. So it is nice to see that Wondy is getting a personality that isn’t like the one in JL. She seems like an over active child that wants to just punch things in that. I’m hoping the time skip is going to fix that.

The redesigns of the Gods have been pretty awesome. I mean, they are creative and interesting to look at. Which is always important in a visual median. The only thing I will get a little nerd pissy about is the Eros is not Hephatestus’s son, he is Aries. But I think the point was that the Smith loves him anyways, so I’m going to let that slide.

And it was cool to see that Diana didn’t have to lie to save Hades. And the depictution of the underworld was pretty cool.

Batwoman #10 Aww yea.

Oh Dear…She’s A MAN!

I picked up all the Batwoman stuff after picking up the trade. And I wasn’t disappointed at all. Like I said before, I love transformed folklore, which is funny that the two series I have talked about in this drive by feature that. But I love it when writers present their research in a way without beating us over the head with it, I felt that has been done with Batwoman.

I’m not too keen on the jumping around telling the story in different points in time, because I feel that the reader loses out on a lot in the first straight read; but I’m willing to overlook it. I feel that they have structured it in a way that it works really well and there is no reason to stop it. It just gives me more to enjoy when I reread it.

I’m also glad that it looks like the love Triangle that Sune, Kate, and Maggie find themselves in, doesn’t look like it will be played up that much. Because I find that shit annoying because it is shitty writing, and not a way to drive up drama. And there is no reason for it because Kate doesn’t like Sune and I feel they have set Maggie’s and Kate’s relationship in a way that yes, it has problems, but it is still pretty small. I don’t think the kiss from Sune is going to affect it, because Maggie doesn’t know Kate is Batwoman. It would be a different story if she did know. I think that there is a problem between Kate and Maggie, and Sune is going to have no effect on their relationship. It is going to be Batwoman that is the problem. Really their love triangle is Kate, Maggie and Batwoman.

And Sune turning into a man, I can’t wait for #11.

So that is really it. I will have something better for tomorrow, promise. It will either be a rant on how it is unfair that the night of owls lead into Batman #10 because now I feel I can’t be mad at it, or Green Lantern Corps #10. Still on the fence on that.

I’m not planning on talking about all the issues with Alan Moore. Because everyone else has done that, and I honestly don’t care. Dc is out to make money that is what companies do. Moore didn’t know it was going to take off the way it did when he signed his rights to it away, so he made that choice. You do that when you want to get your name out there. It is the way it goes and Writers get screwed all the time. The only reason people care is because he is a big name, then it is ‘wrong’. Companies do this all the time to writers who aren’t as famous, it is the nature of the beast. So no, I don’t think it’s wrong. If I could get paid for my creative writing, I would sell out in a heartbeat. Creative intrigue on some level, is bullshit. It’s all about making money. Like everything else in life. That being said, on with the reviews.

So I have picked up the first three of the Before Watchmen series, and if you want my honest opinion, out of all of them, pick up Minute Men. I think it is the best written so far and one of the more put together stories. It starts with Nite owl writing his autobiography, Under the Hood, and he address everyone in the team very well. While I’m usually against framing techniques, were you have one character telling a story, because it usually gets dropped or doesn’t matter; but I think in Minute Men it works really well. Because they also use it to tell us about Nite Owl too! he isn’t just treated as a framing tool, he is a character too. When I talked about the Free Avengers #1 and Justice League #1, I said Justice League won because it didn’t try to over sell me with a lot of characters. Well I vote Minute Men is better than both of them. Yes, it introduces the whole team, and quickly, but it does in such a way that just gives you a sense of all it. They take the time to show you who is who in the story. Yes, it is just a set up, but it is a well written set up.

This scene I think is one of the most powerful things I have read in a while.

The other thing that is great, is characters that Watchmen just glossed over, like the Silhouette or Dollar Bill, are addressed. I’m hoping Silhouette is getting to be in Minute Men because I always wanted to know more about her. We knew she was murdered because she was a lesbian, so it is nice to see if she was good person or not. Watchmen showed that just because you are a hero, doesn’t mean you are good. And I also feel that it did a better job setting up the Comedian than the stand alone that he has. The goal for this issue was to set up the major players, which it did well. It feels like how the original Watchmen felt to me. (Granted, it has been a long time since I read Watchmen, and honestly, I prefer V for Vendetta. But that is because I love Orwell’s 1984 and it just feels like it is that world.) Minute Men tells a very tight story, the other two, not so much.

What…I don’t even…

Which brings me to the other two series….which is just….Meh. I really am not a fan on how The Comedian is presented as JFK’s buddy, and how he is the one who killed Marilyn Monroe; because Jackie Kennedy paid him to. Or at least talked him into it. That was just a wall banger moment for me. I honestly don’t understand the point because, well, we are talking about a woman, who when her husband was shot right next to her, she didn’t take off the suit that was covered in his blood. I know this is an alternative history, but I didn’t feel that there was enough set up for Jackie to talk Eddie into killing Marilyn. It kinda comes out of nowhere. There wasn’t anything established to explain why she is trying to get Eddie kill Monroe. What does she know? It was just poorly written. It never tells us what Monroe knows , but Jackie says she knows something and has a loose tongue….mmmm…okay? It feel it was there because we just needed him to do something that is Comedianish, which I guess killing Monroe is? We already know he is a dick, we saw him shot his pregnant Asian baby mama in the chest in Watchmen. You didn’t need this. And the end was just cliqued. I’m going to pick up issue two, but if the story is around the same as this one, I won’t be picking up the rest.

Yea….living in your mother’s shadow sucks

The Silk Spectre was just a little teen angst and that always kind of annoys me. But the story is told like she is a teenager and that is how it should feel. I can’t argue that one. She is living in her mother’s shadow and she hates it. This is how superhero kids would act. Laurel is pretty well rounded as a character, my problem comes in with her male counterpart, Greg. He was reeking a bit of a Mary Sue and that is always annoying. But even that isn’t too bad. It’s got a few good moments, like when Laurel lays out this girl, Betsy, who has been a cunt to her because the plot demanded it. And that her name is Betsy, and she wants Greg who is in Lurv with Laurel. It ends with them running away to California.

So yea….the other two aren’t bad…they are just, there. If you are going to pick one up out of these three, I think Minute Men is the way to go. Yea, there isn’t a lot of story meat in that one, yet, but I have a good feeling about it.

So I bought the movie, Batman Under the Red Hood Friday night….and have watched it every day since, because, well, I have no life. And love Batman. And since I can’t really come up with anything to talk about I’m going to point out a few things that I enjoyed about the movie.

1.) Ra’s Al Ghul being upset that Jason got killed. I love it when we have complex villains, rather than two dimensional ones. Ra’s was bothered by the fact that Jason was killed and it was his fault. Not saying that he didn’t think the next part every well, but hey, no one perfects.

2.) Watching Nightwing and Batman work together. And the Banter. Dear God the Banter. After watching it a few times it didn’t get old. That surprised me. I figured when I watched it the third time in three days I was going to want to slap him. But no. That didn’t happen. One of the Best line: “I’m chatty, it’s part of my charm.”

3.) The End scene was adorable, but sad. We know how Jason’s tenure as Robin ends within the first like, ten minutes of the movie, and hearing him say that it was the best day of his life, was a knife twist. Seeing Bruce kind of happy and a bit of hamming it up with the kid was sad. We know how their relationship ends, with Jason hating Bruce. But I love that it is like Batman really is just a giant kid. (Who beats the shit out of people every night and kicks a lot of ass when he wants too, but still, giant kid.) Which, on some level, he is. Best line out of the scene: “Would have, if I haven’t heard you slip behind the computer bay three minutes ago!”

4.) The Joker was actually a threat. I remembering watching Batman:TAS and the Joker in that was just a clown, and not really that dark. And I know that was because it was for kids but I’m sorry, the TAS treated you more like an adult than Batman and Robin did. Why do you think Nolan say that Robin wasn’t going to show up in Batman, I will give you a hint, it was that movie. But back to the Red Hood, the Joker was the mix bag of horrifying and funny. I laughed when he killed Black Mask men, because he was funny. It is sick man.

5.) Jason pointing out that there is no reason why the Joker should be alive; by saying that Bruce’s Morals are too fucked up, not seeing that if Bruce crosses that line, there is nothing stopping him from killing anyone in Gotham that is trying to stand in Batman’s way. It was like seeing the two different ends of what Batman could become. That was really really…good.

The only down side is that Batman is voiced by someone else, who did a great job, but it wasn’t Kevin Conroy. Who is, I’m sorry, Batman’s voice. If I had all the money in the world I would pay him to read me batman comics all day long.

Edit: Some Mornings I’m not with it. And don’t think to read the blog…or Hit spell check….So I’m going to go sit in the corner, and flog myself for my failings as a human being.