Good evening! Unless you’re reading this in the morning. Or afternoon. Or at some point in the middle of the night? Gah, whatever. Today’s post comes to you courtesy of InsertEyeroll.com, where funny things are written. Sometimes by me.

Information Processor and Facilitator Kathleen Olivo, 22, was floored to discover that the Excelsior Library, where she started work today, is in fact full of books.

“I couldn’t believe that so much information is organized this way,” Olivo said, pulling a hardcover copy of Johnny Tremaine down from the shelves and swiping a hesitant finger along a page. “Have you seen these things? They’re so bulky!” She held the book up to her face and sniffed.