Yeah, the president will meet with Pope Francis at the White House in September. The two will meet for about an hour or so, and then the Pope will spend the rest of the day hearing confessions from Secret Service agents.
Jimmy Fallon

Yesterday, the White House confirmed that President Obama will meet with Pope Francis during his visit in September. Some experts are wondering if they'll discuss their disagreement over contraception. Then Joe Biden said, “I didn't even know ...

Judge to the court, at the start of a case: "I have
to declare an interest in this case. Last week,
the plaintiff sent me a check for $10,000 to find
in his favor. Two days later, I received $20,000
from the defendant to find in his favor. I have
...

The after-dinner speaker just didn't have a Stop
button. He burbled on and on and on, oblivious
to his increasingly restless audience. Finally
one of the more drunken diners hurled an empty
wine bottle at him. It missed, and hit the Chairman
...