Monday, December 05, 2011

This past Saturday, my husband, our kids, and I went to see our niece perform in the Nutcracker, a fun tradition we’ve carried on for five years now. Seeing our niece progress over the years from a tiny gingerbread girl wielding a wooden spoon, to an angel, a soldier, a Sugar Plum Fairy attendant, and now a party guest has been so fun. And, okay, I have to admit that the guy who danced in the Arabian coffee part was one hot latte – dark-skinned, muscular beyond belief, agile and athletically graceful. When my husband noticed me drooling, I told him it was because the dancer had a shaved head and I have a thing for bald guys (my husband being one himself). Good save, huh? I probably shouldn’t mention that my son renamed the show the “Buttcracker” after noticing a male dancer’s tights lodged firmly between the cheeks of his derriere. (Yep, we’re a classy bunch.)

I love the theme of Holiday Magic in the story. The concept of a toy coming to life has been done over and over again in movies, but it’s one we never tire of - Pinocchio, Babes in Toyland, The Indian in the Cupboard, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Small Soldiers, Toy Story, and even the Chuckie movies – yikes!

The idea got me thinking. If I could bring something in my house to life, what would it be?

We have a sculpture of a solider that my daughter made out of clear strapping tape in an art class. If he came to life, he’d be able to crack the nuts of any intruder who posed a threat to my house or family. Still, I’m not sure how I’d feel about having a machine gun and hand grenades in the house. My family takes enough risks eating my leftovers.

We have a miniature carved wood Tiki totem of a Rastafarian. If he came to life, he could entertain us with Bob Marley songs. But he’d probably grow ganja in my garden and smoke it on the patio. No sense risking the wrath of the homeowners association.

I have a figurine of St. Francis of Assisi that a friend gave me as a housewarming gift years ago. It would be great if he came to life. He’d walk the dogs for me, clean out the litter boxes, keep our critters fed and brushed. And he could play doorman for the dogs, who want in, out, in, no-wait-I-changed-my-mind-I-want-back out at least a hundred times an hour.

If you could bring something in your house to life, what would it be and why?

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10 comments:

LOL, thanks for the laughs this morning. Great way to start out the day!

If I could could bring something in my house to life it would be one of my NHL bobble heads. Then I'd finally have a man in my life. One who was employed, made millions, and when he started to get on my nerves he would go on the road with his team.

My second choice would be my piggy bank. He'd eat my garbage and take care of all my banking all while being really cute.

And here I thought my husband had coined the "Buttcracker" phrase! Seeing the Nutcracker is our one and only real holiday tradition. I'd give my husband a pass if he so chose, but he soldiers on year in and year out. :-)

If I could bring one thing in my house back to life it would be me as a twenty year old with all the energy and body of a twenty year old. Then maybe my house would be cleaned and everything that needs to be done right now done. I would be totally ready for Christmas then.

Bringing to life a soapstone sculpture, which my late father made years ago, that weighs a ton would be my idea. It would sing arias, and have his own show which would be a hit and endless entertainment.

There is an apron that hangs on a hook in my kitchen. My grandmother who was an exceptional cook and baker wore it. I am always hoping for inspiration from this apron but alas, no luck so far. I would bring her back to give me hope and cook up a storm for the family and holidays.

Thanks to everyone who stopped by! Your ideas ranged from funny to touching and all were great! Traveler - you are tonight's winner! Please email me at diane@dianekelly.com with a snail mail address and I'll get your prize in the mail to you. Thanks!

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