caller: But what can this guy possibly do? I mean, he’ll be in handcuffs and there’ll be armed guards all around–

henry: I don’t know what he could do. He could say a Muslim prayer that turns the handcuffs into sand and the guards into husks of corn. And then, you know what? He’s free to go hook up with his radical Islamist buddies and wage joyous jihad on the streets of new york. Okay?

henry: I think that’s kind of obvious. I mean, why do you think bin Laden’s been free for so long? Because he can probably shape shift into, like, a hawk or something and fly away from the guys chasing them.

caller: If they have super powers, then why wouldn’t they have escaped already?

henry: Because they were biding their time. They wanted to wait till they got to New York, which is, like, the ultimate prize, before they wage this, like, ultimate jihad plan.

caller: But how did they know Holder would send them to New York?

henry: Uh, the same way they can turn handcuffs to sand and guards to husks of corn.

caller: Which they can’t.

henry: You’d better watch it, buddy. One of these days you’ll be walking along, thinking you’re about to pass some nice, innocent Muslim woman and say hello, and suddenly, you’re a horned toad.