It’s 6am and I’ve called another run off. This time because outside is like a fucking ice rink. I am not willing to run and risk breaking my neck for the sake of maintaining my consistency.

The last time I tried running on ice, I went ass over tits and was lucky not to smash my head open.

Fortunately only my pride was hurt.

Thinking back to it, I’ve slid twice on the run. The other time was at night and I was pissed as a newt. I had far too much Smirnoff Apple in my bloodstream and decided that I’d go on a nice ‘atmospheric’ jaunt around town.

It was the worst run ever. I think I skidded the whole time and my heart was constantly in my mouth. I felt like the cat in this video when it is given LSD.

Just shaking, skidding and shitting for a mile.

Well not shitting. But you catch my drift.

This week has been a bit frustrating for the running with a combination of the chest infection and the weather holding me back. I should be disappointed with myself but I’m fucking tired of giving myself a hard time.

It’s Nearly Christmas And I Feel Sick.

Yesterday I went into the pharmacy for some Benelyn cough medicine. The pharmacist asked if I wanted the drowsy or non drowsy version. I hesitated and said ‘Both’.

The pharmacist’s eyes alone said ‘Wrong answer sunshine’..

Fuck it, it’s nearly Christmas. I need to lighten up. I’m tired of being angry all the time. I can feel my face clenched into a grimace even if I’m smiling these days.

But I can’t shake the feeling that I’m a bit of a fraud.

If I was a truly inspirational athlete.

If I was a truly inspirational athlete I would have had a backup plan and brought out my sleigh and huskies and went on a quick skate to Dublin and back.

If I was a truly inspirational athlete I would be doing pushups on my dick and not sitting here eating a fucking Snickers for breakfast.

If I was a truly inspirational athlete I would not be giving the television the bird and yelling ‘Fucking cunts!’ at the Australian version of “The Biggest Loser” at 6am.

3 Responses

Give yourself a break. Literally. You have several excellent reasons to be easing right back on the running right now. 1) Hazardous conditions. 2) You’re not well. Your immune system needs energy that running will sap. Running while ill will risk making you more ill, for longer, for the sake of miserable, unproductive runs. (I tried to run through illness this year – I ended up coughing so badly during a run that I’ve still got a pulled abs muscle six months later). 3) You’re coming off the back of a major series of races. Your body needs to time to recover. If you don’t take the pressure off from time to time, you risk injury. Plus it gets monotonous and you risk losing motivation. 4) You’ve got a marathon coming up. You need to go into the training programme rested, well, uninjured and eager. A holiday from training is perfectly reasonable. Which isn’t to say stop running completely – just run for enjoyment. If it it isn’t fun, don’t do it. Then, when the training programme kicks in properly, you’re more likely to be eager and positive about the challenge.