Honestly, the way self is storming through this series is simply amazing!

She skips over all the Clarke, Wells, and Bellamy chapters. Because there is only one way this is all going to shake down: SURVIVAL!

SPOILER SPOILER MAJOR FEELZ AND SPOILER

No, what’s really gotten self’s attention is a character called Glass, who was completely vanished by the TV series, mebbe because she has this obstreperous boyfriend named Luke, who’s from a lower class of human. Well, he got her pregnant and she was imprisoned for an illegal pregnancy, but Glass nobly refused to spill the identity of the father, instead she gave the authorities the name of Luke’s roommate, Carter, who’d been lasciviously pawing at her whenever Luke wasn’t around, thereby proving very deserving of his fate: execution.

While Glass is imprisoned for her illegal pregnancy, Luke shacks up with his best friend, Camille.

Naturally, this story line sucks. Especially when Glass ESCAPES from her evil captors just as she’s about to be shipped to Earth with 99 other juvenile delinquents, and crawls through air vents and all manner of obstacles, only to make it back to Luke’s flat, where he opens the door to her knock, and she sees — Camille.

Luke redeems himself by dumping Camille almost immediately, but come on. Redhead vs. blonde? No question.

Then, Camille gives Glass all manner of side-eye, talks trash, swears she’s going to kill her or some such. But doesn’t actually get an opportunity until the whole space ship has to be evacuated because there’s an unfortunate oxygen leak, and in the crush to make it to the dropships — think Titanic, only outer space — Glass’s mom sprains her ankle, can’t walk, has to be carried by Luke, and then Camille materializes, whispers to Luke the damning secret that Glass has been carrying around all this time: that in fact Glass gave up Luke’s dastardly roommate Carter so that Carter (and not Luke) could be executed for the crime of illegally impregnating Glass. And what does Luke do at this moment of terrible uncertainty? He has no problem with ditching Glass and her unable-to-walk mom and dashes off hand-in-hand with Camille.

Camille, you @@!!###

But this is no time to fall apart, because self is fervently wishing that Glass survives so she can meet up with Luke again and PUNCH THAT NO-GOOD BOY IN THE FACE!

Step one, you say, We need to talk.He walks, you say, Sit down, It’s just a talk. He smiles politely back at you, You stare politely right on through. Some sort of window to your right. He goes left and you stay right.

— The Fray, “How To Save a Life”

Self loves these lyrics. They are so, so — insouciant? Nonchalant? Diffident? What?

First, welcome to creepy San Francisco. It’s little wonder the city served as the setting for the Donald Sutherland movie, “Invasion of the Body Snatchers.” The pods arrive from outer space and take root in Golden Gate Park.

Sutro Tower, San Francisco: Waiting for The Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Snapped from the lawn in front of the Conservatory of Flowers, Golden Gate Park.

Self, what are you doing? She means, what are you doing? This is so — AARGH!

She skips all the Earth chapters because she isn’t interested in Wells, Clarke, Bellamy, Octavia, Earth creatures, Earth bugs, or Earth anything.

Everything she wants to know about is back on the spaceship where Glass continues tip-toeing around her socialite mother (The future has socialites? On a space ship?) and her mother’s paramours and Glass’s love for Luke, the boy who has a convenient friends-with-benefits relationship with his “best friend” Camille (Why does the best friend have the same name as Marcus Bane’s vampire lover in The Infernal Devices? It is such a distraction, the two sharing a name!)

Since Glass’s chapters are only a third of the book, that means self is really only reading 1/3 of The 100.

Anyhoo, the entire spaceship has a viewing party for a comet. At least, the swells on Phoenix have a party (It’s rather lame: the mother has to wear old, stained gloves, but gloves are an extreme rarity in this dystopian society. Whenever self thinks of Glass’s mother, she thinks of Audrey Hepburn brandishing a cigarette, she knows not why.)

To intensify the mood of the excerpt self is about to share with dear blog readers, she’s including a picture self took of her cell phone in her handbag. She knows everything is too blurry to distinguish any objects in the picture. But the lighted strip actually did emanate from her phone, which was tucked inside her bag.

“Look!” a little girl called out. A white line was rising over the outline of the moon. Instead of fading away like most comets, it grew larger, the tail expanding as it blazed through space. It made even the stars look dim.

Glass stepped forward almost unconsciously, and a couple leaning up against the nearest window shuffled aside to give her space. It was so beautiful, Glass thought in wonder. And terrifying. It was growing larger and larger, filling up the entire viewing space in the porthole, as if it were coming straight at them.