Coffee Talk- Moving In With Your Significant Other

Monday, August 22, 2016

It's been about a month since Alex and I decided to take the plunge and co-habitate a cute little second floor apartment. This move has been great because I get to wake up to my best friend every single morning. I get to tell stories about my day, my blog and life. I look forward to ending my day on the couch with my best friend and leaving "have a great day" on the whiteboard on the fridge every morning.

As much as I love living with him, it certainly presents challenges. Everyone know's boys are difficult so here are some things to consider before taking the plunge.

What's your definition of clean?

We're both pretty busy individually and at the end of a long day it's easy to save some dishes for tomorrow. If you ask me, I'm more than okay with that. It's important to make sure leaving a couple of dishes for tomorrow doesn't turn into a mound of smelly dishes next week. If there are a couple hanging around, can you expect your significant other to pick up the sponge? I would prefer my bed to be made everyday but I leave the house first and that doesn't happen. I deal with it.

Finances

You'll want to make sure you're both on the same page before moving in with one another. Alex and I are aware of what the other earns, we discuss our bills weekly and take turns buying groceries or ordering out. Neither of us know exactly what the other has for money at any given moment but we're both aware that bills can and will be paid and we're honest when groceries were a lot and the other needs to pick up a little slack. It's also been important that we limit our meals out. Cooking together and planning meals saves us a lot of money. Being an adult is choosing between chinese takeout and RedZone.

Company

Before deciding to shack up with little old me, Alex lived in a large house with five other guys. Yes, five and YES, it was gross. Alex's door was always open to friends and families to swing by. Believe it or not I really do mean always. I don't think that door locked a day during their lease. For this reason it was important for me to tell him right off the bat that sometimes I just want to be in my home without a bra or makeup. Sometimes I don't want to entertain. Alex know's how I feel and is getting pretty good at giving me warning before someone comes over. The surprise visits (surprise for me that is) are definitely still a thing but I secretly don't mind them. He just can't know that. Make sure the two of you talk about company and when you'll have it.

Arguments

No one wants to think about this one but it's something that is really important. When you have an argument is your first instinct to run? If so, ask yourself what will happen when there is no where to run to. It's nice that we have a bedroom I can sneak away to for gossip girl, face masks and wine but sometimes we just need to sit there and hash it out. Sometimes, there is no answer and agreeing to disagree is the only way to end it. Can you settle your blood back to a slight simmer and enjoy dinner after that?

Fun usually requires some degree of work to keep it going. A relationship and a home are no different. If you're confident and your significant other is your best friend and biggest supporter, it's a no-brainer.