Q: Ever since New Year’s, I've wanted to start losing weight, but it’s so hard because I can’t seem to stick with a diet. I also want someone to be there with me while I’m on my diet. I just don’t know what to do, and I’m tired of looking in the mirror and not being happy with what I see. Please help.

-Samantha N.

A: Hi Samantha,

I’m so sorry to hear you’re feeling unhappy and frustrated, but very pleased to see you writing me and asking for help. That tells me that there’s a part of you that isn’t quite ready to give up yet, and that’s the part of you I want to speak with today. Just ask that “Doubting Thomas,” or should I say “Doubting Samantha,” inside your head to step outside for a moment while you and I talk! There are few things in this world more difficult and emotionally-challenging than weight loss and lifestyle change. And one of the reasons for this is that there’s a part of your personality always trying to sabotage your efforts. I call this battle The Family Feud. I think it will open your eyes and help you see your weight loss struggle in a whole new light.

There is also nothing wrong with recruiting the support of your friends and family. Weight loss will be more successful when those around you are aware of your efforts and encourage positive changes. However, they might not want to or need to lose weight, and that’s OK. You can still continue on your weight loss journey individually, but with their support.

Another critical key to your struggle is found in a very powerful word that you used in your very first sentence – “can’t.” Can’t is an extremely debilitating word that robs you of power and keeps you stuck in the past. The truth is that you CAN do this, Samantha, and once you embrace that belief, a whole new world will open up to you. You already have the ability, you only need the belief. Make it happen, Samantha! You are worth the effort, and I believe in YOU!