My name is Einstein and I am running for mayor of Oakland, California.

I like to run. A lot! I mean A LOT! So make no mistake, I can make it all the way to the finish line, and I invite you to join me! :)

What gets under my collar is Oakland City officials not doing their job, and police not being prosecuted for beating and killing innocent beautiful creatures like Alan Blueford & Gloria, for example.

I have dogannally also been victim of Oakland Police brutality. While participating in peaceful rallies and marches, along with humans, I have been tear gassed, and had a flashbang grenade explode just a few paw-strides away from me. As a consequence I have been diagnosed with canine post-traumatic stress disorder, you can't even SAY the words 'Jean Quan' around me without causing me to freak out and start barking up trees trying to find the scoundrel.

That's why as mayor I will make sure the Oakland shelter is a place where animals can expect kindness, care, and placement in a loving home rather than a canine Auschwitz-Barkenau or Dogchau.I see humans being harassed and hurt by police for the crime of being poor. I see injustice in my City where wealthy citizens can send their offspring to fancy private academies while the public schools have trouble keeping the bathrooms stocked with toilet paper, much less stall doors. I am a street smart dog, I have never even been to obedience school, but I know that is wrong.

I also believe that human rights are not just for humans, all creatures have an expectation of privacy, so as mayor I will put my paw down and stop the Domain Awareness Center. We don't need a networked surveillance grid recording our every movement around the City, monitoring whether we are leashed and are wearing our City-mandated licenses. Oakland requires that all dogs have a RFID microchip implanted in their body. When my mommy took me to Oakland Animal Control to get chipped I fought off 3 cops rather than have microcircuits wedged under my coat. Mom came back home and tried to get dad to go back a make me accept my chip, but dad said he agreed with me, I didn't need a chip, so mom took me back to animal control and I beat back 3 more cops. So mom paid $10, I have a chip number, but no ID chip. Those RFID tags can be used to track your movements all over town.

So for these and so many of other reasons I am running for mayor. After being elected I will fire many sitting municipal bureaucrats and recruit good staff regardless of race, gender, religion, size, age, sexual orientation, marital status, economic background, educational history, species or neutered status.. Beings who know how to care for, protect, and love others. Mackeral Jack Valentine, Bear, and Egon I have an eye on you.

My staff will not accept the current bigfat salaries so many OaklandPolice are making. That extra money will go in food and programs to benefit our community's young brothers and sisters.

I invite you to visit my Gallery, my Facewoof page, and to spread the word, don't give up, because... ANOTHER OAKLAND IS POSSIBLE!