RON SCHALOW: Heidi Kicks Kevin’s Butt

RON SCHALOW: Heidi Kicks Kevin’s Butt

Executive Summary: Heidi Heitkamp walked over Kevin Cramer like an Irish setter wearing spiked golf shoes Friday eve. But all you get when that happens is a deflated, puffed-up bantam rooster, which makes for little more than a lumpy throw rug with a weak mind and sweaty palms.

Sen. Heidi Heitkamp

“Smirky” claimed to be for civility in politics, while his roly-poly role model was loading his next nasty tweet into the chamber and heading to his next hateful fear fest, and some red-hat Trump nut was out to blow up people who lying Don attacks on a nightly basis. Kevin’s muse.

Then, Cramer set off to offend and lie, just like his adopted old man. It was a sad display even for an empty suit with no accomplishments on which to boast. All quotes, not in news reports, belong to Cramer.

Tariffs

Calling his Friday debate opponent Heitkamp a traitor was an anticipated inflammatory dick move lie by a cocky Trump acolyte. Old Eddie Haskell on smelling salts can’t help himself. Cheap shots are in his Cult45 infused blood. The process is quite painful. Especially if you want a thimble of Karl Rove.

You would think it was a gaffe, but Kevin had this scurrilous slander written down and ready to shout indignantly.

“Standing with Communist China is not standing with North Dakota.”

Nobody in North Dakota is standing, sitting or doing the Macarena with China. Not Heidi, not farmers, not Vets, not barbers, not dog walkers. Nobody. It’s a meticulously ignorant thing to say, but Kevin must feel that talking nonsense resonates with some of the less intelligent members of the Cramer Crew, and there are tons of those types in his mob. That slur wasn’t enough, though.

“China is not going to roll over, just because you’re on their side.”

Meaning Heidi. She looked at him like, oh, you poor boy and brushed it off. But Kev pushed forward.

“You want to talk about unity? Unify behind the United States instead of China.”

And.

“But you go over there and undermine our president’s authority, our president’s leverage.”

I think Heidi went on a trade mission to Mexico if that’s “over there.”

Until recent strange and dangerous days, I’ve never heard a legitimate American lawmaker call a U.S. senator a traitor. Perhaps Kevin was recalling the day his man-crush bent the knee to a poisonous Russian dictator. Who knows what goes through his reptilian brain?

Moving on. Many — or some number of many — farmers that Cramer knows, ask him why the president didn’t do this tariff thing a long time ago. I call bullshit.

“Trump doesn’t like cheaters.”

The audience needed a hearty laugh. It was good to laugh again.

“This is why we have bins.”

No one ever thought of that. Hey guys. This smug feller here says we should just put our soybeans in bins. This solves our problem!

But these bins now cost more because of the president’s tariffs on steel and aluminum, and few farms have enough storage for an entire crop. They aren’t free. Not like free trade. Yup, he’s a dandy. In a few more years, he could be ready for the Public Service Commissiom.

Or he could have meant more “Bens,” who are generally very useful but can only hold a few pockets full of beans. Most of them big. No one knows why.

This president understands long-term trade wars, claims Cramer. Uh, Trump may understand something, maybe within the scope of marbles, but this isn’t it. Either Kevin isn’t hip to the Trump incurable sociopathic incompetence thing, or he’s hoping for the inevitable calamity caused by venom Vinnie. Maybe, like thousands of white people dying on an island.

That sounds traitorous.

Health care

“Cramer named a group of state Republican leaders who favor dumping the law to give more power to the states and said he’s ‘pretty sure that Heidi Heitkamp isn’t the smartest person in that whole group.’ Heitkamp said she trusts health care officials over Republican politicians. Heitkamp said ‘we cannot play politics with our healthcare.'” —New York Times

I ran the numbers on that group of Republicans, and Heitkamp wins that IQ contest. We don’t even need to bring out the chains for a measurement.

Everything the Cramerbot has EVER said or done would have eliminated or weakened the pre-existing conditions protected by the Affordable Care Act, but now he has to make deceitful claims to fake a few voters out.

Kevin disputes the number of people who will be affected by his actions. He says, ONLY 15,000 citizens with pre-existing conditions would not be protected — a very very small number. Since when did 15,000 become an insignificant number of humans?

He voted to repeal without replacement, Heidi said to that effect. “I just did,” said Cramer.

Nobody knows what he meant.

Russian missile treaty

“I think the president might be acting prematurely, quite honestly,” Cramer said when asked about Trump’s decision to withdraw from the Intermediate-Range Nuclear Forces Treaty with Russia. But he added later that “if he says he wants to do it this way, I’m going to support him.” — The Hill

Profiles in porridge. Does Cramer know how this country works?

Immigration

“We ought to have a say into who comes into our country”

We do. Has something changed? Kev wouldn’t suggest “that we don’t have a say” just to scare people. Would he?

Kevin really loves President Trump’s “four pillars for immigration,” which mean he doesn’t understand what he refers to as “chain migration” because reuniting families is no longer a family values thing, or get the gist of the immigration lottery, or see the stupidity of the big beautiful wall.

Social Security and Medicare

Everything is on the table, says Cramer, but I would never vote to cut Social Security. Those are two conflicting thoughts, so one them would be a lie. Those are the rules. Sorry Kev.

Kevin explains mandatory spending versus your discretionary spending. It wasn’t as interesting as an earthworm on a wet sidewalk.

Cramer said that he never talked about the privatization of any Social Security program. I’m pretty he sure he did because the seniors give him a 9 percent lifetime score on his voting record. How would a guy even go about earning a single digit?

“I’m willing to work across the aisle.”

The audience gets another solid laugh. Not unless pumpkinhead tells him to work across the aisle, or sweep the aisle. Willingness doesn’t come into play.

In a snotty-nosed brat retort to a Heitkamp barrage of truth, Cramer says, “She likes to keep digging and digging. She’s in Hail Mary mode, I get it.”

He wants to boast of a perceived large lead in the polls. Oh well, let him feel good for a few more days.

And Mitch McConnell has already admitted that the Republicans are going after Social Security, Medicare and probably a few endangered species.

Tax cuts

If I transcribed this properly, Kevin boasted and name-dropped. “Did anybody notice we’ve had a 12-month GDP growth over 3 percent, something that Barack Obama could never have accomplished.”

Even fighting against a recession — a “great” recession — the Congress would never grant Obama $1.9 trillion to juice the economy. Cheap enemy name-drop.

Tax cuts for the rich are “part of the formula,” says Cramer.

I’m sure they are, and that’s what makes them frightening.

He says business investment growth, which is currently terrible, is not the leading indicator of the economy. That’s false and terrifying in a bad way.

“Rocket ship economy.” It isn’t and the slogan is silly.

Climate change

Cramer would not admit that climate change is man-made, which is most of our problem, but he conceded that something needed to be done. Finally, the last piece of the puzzle.

Ivanka and Jared, and Rex Tillerson, were in favor of keeping the Paris agreement. Kevin said he stood with these three, and Ivanka and Jared have no clue of who this Cramer toady is. And who boasts about standing with Ivanka and Jared? Is that a thing?

Well, Heidi supported Hillary, who wanted to end it all, he said in his highest pitch teen voice of despair.

“Thank God this president saved coal and oil.”

Don’t get God involved in your oily shilling. And quit saying false things. Coal is dying on its own, and oil won’t die for quite some time, no matter the president.

Money in politics

Cramer believes contributions are a form of expression. Like tap-dancing. Most people know that the big ones are just legal bribes.

It was noted that Heidi received $12.5 million in the past 17 days, and Cramer smarmed, “from the pro-abortion crowd. I understand that, but that’s OK.”

It has been said, but it bears repeating. Cramer is a royal dick. It could be that a lot of men and women who appreciated her vote against that asshole Kavanaugh because they support victims of sexual assault then wrote a check. Plus there is no pro-abortion crowd. Just saying.

Miscellaneous

Were there any kidney punches? Yes, Heidi was very successful in the kidney area.

The moon onFriday was in a waning gibbous phase, which is irrelevant, or so they want us to believe. Trump thinks it has something to do with money-grubbing scientists. Old DT doesn’t know what “it” is, but he’s sure there is one and it will show up. Then the media will really get it.

Cramer kept saying “this president” as though we could forget “this president.” He’s freaking out about a few thousand, mostly women and children, evidently afraid to the degree that they would take their children on a dangerous 1,000-mile stroll in the heat. I don’t know why these people are so frightening.

Of course, Kevin benefits from Trump’s racist hysteria. Everything Trump spouts hits the red hats of both campaigns. Cramer is just as repugnant by association.

“Group think of Chuck Schumer.” That’s a thing, now.

“There’s a big difference between current and future.” Uh oh, We’re not dealing with just any chimp here, and the space between current and future needs to be considered. That goes without saying.