6 Ways to Make Friends with Your Neighbors

Use these tips so you don’t feel like a stranger in your own neighborhood

You have hundreds of “friends” around the country (or even the world) through social media—but how many people do you actually know in your own ‘hood? Sixty-one percent of Americans would like to know more of their neighbors, according to a recent survey from Nextdoor.com, which runs a free social network of the same name for neighborhoods. The survey was conducted by Harris Interactive.

“Getting to know your neighbors can be very beneficial both for emotional and logistic reasons,” says Irene S. Levine, Ph.D., a psychologist and friendship expert who was not involved in the survey. “It’s nice to feel part of a community and to not feel like a stranger in your own neighborhood, and there also may be times when you need to call on a neighbor for help.”

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Nextdoor.com is one way to meet people in your area: Members can use it for everything from organizing a joint garage sale to alerting neighbors about a robbery to finding out if anyone has a drill they can borrow. Plus, it’s private, meaning you can only join your neighborhood network if you use your real name and verify your address.

Check out five more ways to introduce yourself to your neighbors (without seeming nosy):

Become a “Regular”
Go to the same Laundromat, gym, nail salon, or coffee shop frequently, and you’ll begin to see the same faces over and over again. “It’s much easier to introduce yourself to someone if you’ve already become familiar to them, and vice versa,” says Levine. So say hi to the same woman a few times, and it will feel more natural to go up and ask her if she’d like to sit together while you sip your lattés.

Compliment, Compliment, Compliment
Let your neighbor know that he or she has an adorable puppy or a beautiful baby—those are instant conversation starters. And even if he or she is walking solo, find something else to admire, like an eye-catching necklace or awesome boots. “Friendships often start by finding what two people have in common,” says Levine. “Complimenting not only makes that person feel good, but you’re showing an interest in some choice that they’ve made.” (One word of caution: Make sure you don’t come on too strong by repeatedly mentioning things like, “I saw you come out of your building and…” or “I noticed you drive down the street…” “No one wants to feel like they’re constantly being watched,” says Levine.)

Give Them a Grin
“People forget how important it is to smile and make eye contact,” says Levine. When you constantly keep your eyes down or on your smartphone while you’re walking down the street, for example, you imply that you’re busy and don’t want to make friends. “Smiling at someone instantly says, ‘I’m interested in connecting,’” says Levine.

Join (or Start!) a Local Group
If you have kids, that’s an automatic reason to look for a local playgroup with fun parents. Even if you don’t, join or form a running club, book club, or even a weekly movie or dinner club. You’ll meet lots of people all at once, and you’ll already know you have at least one thing in common, says Levine. You can learn about groups or recruit others to join yours at Meetup.com. Alternatively, you could use Facebook’s new graph search feature to find friends of friends who might want to join your group. Just try typing something like “Friends of my friends who live in Brooklyn, New York, and like Running” into the search bar and see who pops up. The benefit here is that you can ask your common friend to make an introduction.

Greet the Newbies
“When somebody new moves onto the block, it’s an easy opportunity to welcome them,” says Levine. Stop by to introduce yourself—and maybe even bring some cookies from your favorite neighborhood bakery while you’re at it—and then it won’t be at all awkward to approach each other in the future.

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