Career breaks can be deliberate or the unplanned result of being made redundant. When I quit my senior marketing job this May, I hadn’t anticipated what I would gain from simply stopping. It has been over 3 months of self-reflection and rejuvenation. Seven lessons are helping me to move into a healthier, more fulfilling lifestyle. Here they are:

Don’t be so serious– Having a few months with no meetings, no deadlines and no corporate identity made me realise I had put my trust and emotions in the wrong things. My children didn’t care where I worked – they just wanted me to be healthy and happy. My job is a separate thing from who I am. It was in my nature to do my best but I needn’t take it so seriously. I might make a mess of a project but it doesn’t mean I’m a mess.

Go back to your roots or travel the world– I spent a significant amount of time soul searching, digging into what makes me tick. If I’m not my job then who am I? I spent time visiting friends and family, and also travelled to my homeland in Africa. I hadn’t been home in nearly 6 years and I hadn’t lived there in 11 years. Going home put a swing in my step through a renewed sense of meaning and identity. I wish I had travelled the world or even just spent more time in Africa. But there’s next time.

Walk towards a positive– It’s easy to run away when a job isn’t working out. The question is: what are you running towards? I love how a friend of mine once phrased it. He said,

Walk towards a positive rather than run away from a negative.

Spot early on when things aren’t working out. I gave myself sufficient time to determine what my positive was, then I went towards it. A positive could be a vacation, a career break, another job, going back to school, spending time with the family and so on. Don’t run away. Run towards.

Rediscover yourself– Whether conscious or not, many of us conform to get along and ahead. Taking a career break might be a way to identify what’s you and what’s your employer’s culture rubbing off on you. All corporate culture is not bad of course but I found it’s important to rediscover who you are outside a company. There comes a time when we have to decide who we want to be. Are you going to be the same person at home and at work or will you have a different persona for the different environments? I personally could not handle being more than one person. At first, it was tough carving out who me was but once I did, I was determined to be authentic.

Tame your fears– I had sleepless nights. ‘What if I’m just stressed and a couple of weeks off is all I need?’ I knew enough to realise that I needed to think and I couldn’t think knowing that work was piling up somewhere and my inbox was bursting at the seams, waiting for my return. And that was that – I quit.

Quitting was frightening. I heard every criticism anyone ever said in those few minutes before I clicked send. I was paralysed with confusion. I thought, ‘If this is the right thing to do, why the hell am I shaking??’ I did it anyway. It took me till 5pm to tame the fear but I sent off my resignation.

Find your passion– I felt day to day that I wasn’t spending enough time doing things that played to my strengths. I discovered that I had a passion for teaching – something that was evident from a very early age when I would gather together the neighbourhood kids and teach them something – a song, a dance routine, or have them act out a play I had written.

I enjoy leading, learning, writing, building things from scratch and marketing. It could be a process, an idea or an event. If it involves a blank sheet of paper, it energises me.

Ability, knowledge and interest intersect to reveal a passion. The next phase of my life is likely to be dominated by teaching, learning and marketing – things I might even write about from my unique perspective. This is my sweet spot.

Make a re-entrance– After 3 months, I have become busy again. But it is good busy. I know what’s important to me so I make time for it. It’s amazing how much you can get done if you build flexibility into your routine.

I can pick up my children from school a few days a week. There is also time to be creative and just reflect, which has led to more personal essays and business book ideas. Because I’m happier, my family is happier. I continue the exercise routine I developed over the last few months. I find that I’m never stressed for long.

I’m grateful for the brief silence. It taught me that I have choices about who I am, where I work and what I allow to matter. I’ll always look back fondly on these months. And I can’t promise I won’t quit again. After all, I haven’t travelled the world yet.

Like this:

This week’s photo challenge is an opportunity to talk about my great week. I’m busy again after 13 weeks of doing “nothing”. It’s good to be back, at least in part. I can even say it’s refreshing. I spent the weekend before the busyness started with friends at a barbeque.

Chilling at the Barbeque last Saturday

Here’s my mesh gallery. Check out my first day at my part time job, plus a few lengths of the swimming pool on a Friday morning (my off day!) and then completing a personal essay I’ve been working on.