How do I tell my parents that I plan on converting to Islam?

I've been confused about my religion for the LONGEST time. I've been to church when I was a little girl, and I would read the Bible with my friend's mom at the time. I always questioned her things, and she would tell me all about it. Christianity was very confusing to me, and it never really made sense.. As I got older, it still never made sense. While growing up, my family basically had no religion. They told me I could believe in whatever I wanted to believe in. I just nodded my head, and I started researching my beliefs.. It's been a year now that I'm been studying about Islam. Everything makes sense. It touches my heart, and I embrace everything about Islam.

I talked to my sister about my beliefs, and she just smiled. She's a strong Christian, and she told me that I can believe in whatever I wanted to. Honestly, I felt so relieved. It's just my parents now..I told my mom how I want to go into a Mosque. She's just all "Oh Goodness.." But then she's like "Oh! Then why doesn't (my friend who is Muslim) take you in there?" I HONESTLY feel like she has a little clue of what's going on...

How should I tell my parents that I plan on converting soon?

I am debating about just converting without anybody knowing. Only a few friends know about my situation right now, but not my parents.. I plan on buying a Quran, and just placing it in my room for them to see to figure things out.

Most Helpful Guy

You hate negativity?How do you accept Islam, and it's call to kill the unbeliever?Quran (2:191-193) - "And kill them wherever you find them, and turn them out from where they have turned you out. And Al-Fitnah [disbelief or unrest] is worse than killing... but if they desist, then lo! Allah is forgiving and merciful. And fight them until there is no more Fitnah [disbelief and worshipping of others along with Allah] and worship is for Allah alone. But if they cease, let there be no transgression except against Az-Zalimun (the polytheists, and wrong-doers, etc.)"

This is in the Koran. Not a Hadith, not some claim made by evil westerners and our desire to smear Islam. This is word for word Islam. It blatantly says that not believing in Allah is worse than killing someone, and that the only forgiveness one can get, to avoid death, is if they worship Allah.

Or how about the proclamation to not take non-muslims as friends?Quran (5:80) - "You will see many of them befriending those who disbelieve; certainly evil is that which their souls have sent before for them, that Allah became displeased with them and in chastisement shall they abide."In other words: take a non-Muslim as a friend, and you have proven the evil in your soul, and will be damned.

You complain about negativity? I didn't make up these verses. They are Koran.

Why do you think we horrible, bigoted, "racist" people only oppose Islam? We don't talk about Buddhism, Hinduism, Sikhism, Taoism, Shinto, Zoroastrianism, Animism, etc, the way we do about Islam. The idea that we just hate it because it is non-west and non-Christian collapses when you see that there are myriad other non-west, non-Christian things we DO NOT attack, slander, feel threatened by, etc.

Maybe? JUST MAYBE? The problem with Islam is in the ideology itself, and not our bigotry. And maybe you either don't see it because whoever has been teaching you about it has openly lied about what Islam is, or maybe you don't see it because you are a moral and cultural relativist who insists it is all equally good or bad.

Just remember: one you say the shahada, you are Muslim. You can not change your mind after that. I mean, you CAN, but...Quran (4:89) makes it pretty clear: if you leave the worship of Allah, you are to be killed. You can look that up yourself.

@ksoma you are misinformed brother and I understand you are so lost that is why I pray for you. may Allah guide you to the truth. and if you are corrupted I still pray for your guidance and for all those who are also lost.

1) How do you accept Islam, and it's call to kill the unbeliever? you quoted Quran (2:191-193) where is Quran (2:194-196)

brother ISLAM NEVER ORDERED TO KILL YOU (any unbeliever). please watch this video, the speaker explains in detail.

@Somali a debate back and forth between me and you about what is true Islam solves little, sadly, because there are Muslims who believe as you do, and those who think the faith is truly represented as I see it.And so long as there are people, who claim to be Muslims, who see things so differently, the way I, as a non-Muslim, sees things matters very little.

Let me simply say this: My problems, distrust, and distaste, for ISLAM, is aimed at an ideology, not a people. I do not hate Muslims. 1.5 billion Muslims? Many must be good people. They simply have to be, based on simple math.I do not doubt you are a good person. I do not doubt there are countless other Muslims who are good people. And I would not want to see any of you mistreated, and as a people, I would come to your defense.But I'm afraid I do not share your view of your ideology. I see the hard line Wahabbist view as not only dangerous, but the most literally correct, sadly.

Most Helpful Girl

as a christian, i would honestly tell u how to confront your mother about converting to islam if i felt ur intentions were right.

I'm going to be very honest here. i read ur question till the end, and i found no reason for u wanting to convert, other than the fact that u were confused, and that christianity doesn't always make sense. this is normal, even for some of the strongest christians. understanding it all would make u superhuman, but that is where faith comes in. and guess what? say u do convert to islam, u won't understand it all. u just won't, and I'm 100% sure of that. some things you will be in awe of, others confused, others disgusted, others enlightened, etc.

being confused by the faith is not a reason to change it. it is a reason to CHALLENGE IT. when you researched christianity further, id like to know how far you went. not only that, did you use anything other than the internet? because when it comes to religion, the internet is quite stupid, to be frank. us youth challenge our beliefs all the time. we ask bishops and priests about certain elements of the faith. we ask about the church's opinion on things. you need ANSWERS, and converting is not an answer, because by converting... you're only gonna have more questions.

@Asker first congratulations sister. Today is the last day of the month of Ramadan and if you have become a Muslim within this month blessed month of Ramadan then you are not the only one. please watch this video of newly born brothers and sisters.

@justbanANNAz I don't usually reply to opinions on closed questions but I want to help you as much as I can and I know I can't convert you or anyone else or guide you to Islam however I will pray for guidance to the truth.

may I ask you this one question "have you ever written ISLAM AND CHRISTIANITY on YouTube." I do that many times at least once a week because I am searching for knowledge.

@Somali listen mate, i've studied religion in depth for awhile, so I'm not uneducated on it. the more you're going to keep trying to make your point, the bitchier ill become. I'm not okay with what you're doing around here, and that's not going to change.

@justbanANNAz why not my dear? you don't want to find out the truth because it is your bible that says "Seek the truth then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." Bible, John, Chapter 8, Verse 32. I hope you have the bible so confirm it.

What Guys Said 36

You want to wear a bag over your head, be treated as property and be worth only a quarter of a man?You want a religion that teaches men that it is okay to beat you and actually gives instruction in the best way to beat a woman?Okay, if that is what you want, go for it.Be aware, though, that Sharia requires that you have to be killed if you change your mind later. The penalty for leaving Islam is death. Look it up.

@SillyMillyLook up the hijab and the burka. It is you who is "ignorant as hell".I am former army. I have seen first hand what goes on in the Islamic world.Anyone, especially a woman, would have to be certifiably insane to want that.

I used to be of the belief that all religions are basically the same, they're all pointing to the same thing but just coming from different directions... but this isn't just a religion where you read a few verses from a book and spend an hour or two in church on Sunday, this is a belief system that encompasses your entire life. Yes, there are moderates who take a very loose approach and are probably decent people, just like anyone else. But true Muslims who take their religion seriously?The more I learn about the religion and it's history, the more it scares me, especially with all that's going on in the world today.

This is a funny article at first... but once it sinks in that this is serious and not meant as a joke, it turns sad pretty quick...

You sir, are looking at very EXTREME cases.All those videos, all your talk, everything you've seen.. that's all extreme.I have seen EXTREME Christians do craazzzyyy things and believe in mind boggling things.There is an extreme within every kind of people, and every religion.

It's just that media portrays Islam as the worst because that is what the world wants to see. By the way, I'm Muslim. I do not wear a scarf. My parents are very care-free, my mother was never beat by my father. They were never arranged, it was a love marriage.

I undertand you saw this "first-hand" but what you saw are extreme cases. I can walk into a certain part of my town and I can see extreme Christians who follow things that are beyond any of us.

LMAO.you are actually making me laugh.You are literally LOOKING UP extreme cases ahahaha

Take a walk in my neighborhood where there are muslims everywhere and be surprised to see how humble, kind hearted, and NOT violent we really are.What a way to judge, man. It's 2016. Open your mind a little.

@reixun no it isn't. The Catholic Church wasn't as heavily attacked as other religions but Hitler despised religion in any form. He certainly wasn't Catholic, I've read a lot about him, I studied WW2 history at University. The thing about him helping the Church is nonsense but the church was powerful like it always has been, so not as easily disposed of.

@Dimmu yeah those were horrendous. I know how raped my mother's home country was by the Nazi's (the Netherlands). I think Sharia law is dangerous and I think there is extremists in most religions but I think we are dealing with a great majority of Muslim rxtremists now but that can be put down to the amount of Muslims there are in comparison with other relgious zealots.

Over the past few years, more and more Americas have converted to Islam, particularly women. are you saying they were not aware because women are converting to Islam at such rapid rates that they outnumber men 4 to 1.

believe me it is you who is unaware, misinformed, misguided, corrupted.I am shocked.WHO SAID THAT "The penalty for leaving Islam is death" I AM SURE THE QURAN DON'T SAY ITISLAM DOES NOT SAY KILL THOSE WHO CHANGE THEIR FAITH. IT NEVER SAID.

I know the quran from page 1-600, I have memorized it when I was 11 years old and I have never seen such verses. please watch the following speakers for more details.

@Somali Apparently you have not studied your own religion, unless you are engaging in Taqiyya (the Islamic doctrine of lying to the Infidel about the true nature of Islam).I refer you to the Hadith:“Whoever changed his Islamic religion, then kill him.” Bukhari 9.84.57

you must certainly put to the sword all who live in that town. You must destroy it completely,[b] both its people and its livestock. 16 You are to gather all the plunder of the town into the middle of the public square and completely burn the town and all its plunder as a whole burnt offering to the Lord your God. That town is to remain a ruin forever, never to be rebuilt,

@Blonde401 i will tell you ,You mentioned the group of people whos victim are the least , and trying to portrait them , I showed you with numbers that Muslims are twice as peacefulOne more thing to make me think you think less of us, that you only accuse Germans, while what German did in Europe is the same what italian, French, British did in Africa and even more, but you only accuse Germans, for us there is no difference between Germans and others , all thirsty for blood , but i won't be stupid and generalize all European, at the end each to his own

@Dimmu I never said anything like that. I said there are a number of Muslim extremeists in the world. Which there are. I'm aware that there are a lot of peaceful Muslims but there are extremists as well. Im anti any relgion personally.

Lol good luck I hope you know what your getting yourself into FYI you better do a hell of a lot more then just read a little bit of the Quran before making this decision. Anyone can just read a little bit of something and think it's great.

I hope so I'd hate for you to go into thinking it's something that it's not and the reality be a shocking realization for you. And once you become a Muslim there are extreme ramifications if you ever try to leave it.

And why spare her? the world is a scary and frightening place full of danger just as much as it is filled with wonder. something she will have to accept or realize sooner or later, better sooner then later.

You just said it yourself , that you've only heard. There is a considerable number of folks who don't practice religion or have left it, With your adverse comments such as above, you are scare mongering others who plan or intend to not practice it.

Why pick Islam? That's the worst of them all. At least Jesus and Buddha never married a 6 year old like that POS Muhammad did:

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Asker

UGGH. Are you kidding me? This is what I hate in our society. People like you. People so negative in our society. You're filled with so much hate, and it's honestly so disgusting. You basically wasted your own time wanting to comment this on my question. Congratulations for wasting that much time in your life.

Just because your hatred is directed at what you believe is a worthy cause doesn't change the fact that it's hypocritical. The fact that you hate people like me and then turn around and bash me for being hateful is just hypocritical and down right pathetic.

Yes, Mohammed was a paeodphile.He also owned sex slaves and was a mass murderer.It is all recorded in his own words, in the Quran, which also describes him as Islam's 'perfect man'.Good to know the role model that Muslims seek to copy.

Lol hon, you're in for a lot worse than this if you actually convert. It's difficult but if your internal peace is found with Islam, it'll be worth it. My parents are muslims and they're very happy with their faith.

It is said Quran is the central book for Muslims but remember this, there are the Hadiths put forwarded as the words of Muhammed! I do not mean to be rude but there are tales of war in those Hadiths too. Religion is your personal choice but do not go into a religion because it is *trendy at par. You have not read the Quran so you do not understand the ideologies of it. Read it first. Islamic societies in general will follow the Sharia and Hadiths are non-questionably followed. Read what you get into not because media says so, go because you want to go. I am converting to Buddhism in a couple of years after I have studied the scriptures. I am learning Pali now to understand his teaching in his language not English. I do not believe in God, I have no attraction to materialism and I want to live a life separated from the society that is why I hope to become a Monk in future. So understand what you are going into! And do not let other peoples thought misguide you.

It is your life, I encourage you to live it as you see fit. I'll reveal that I personally think you are making a monumentous error in choosing Islam of all the religions from which to pick, but I'll not ramble on trying to dissuade you.

I WILL however, invite you to perhaps do a little more thinking, and a little more research before committing to anything drastic like a one way ticket to Iran. If you need a Muslim environment might I suggest Michigan where at least shariah law does not supersede human civil rights.

Quran (2:244) - "Then fight in the cause of Allah, and know that Allah Heareth and knoweth all things."

Quran (3:56) - "As to those who reject faith, I will punish them with terrible agony in this world and in the Hereafter, nor will they have anyone to help."

Quran (3:151) - "Soon shall We cast terror into the hearts of the Unbelievers, for that they joined companions with Allah, for which He had sent no authority". This speaks directly of polytheists, yet it also includes Christians, since they believe in the Trinity (ie. what Muhammad incorrectly believed to be 'joining companions to Allah').

Quran (4:89) - "They but wish that ye should reject Faith, as they do, and thus be on the same footing (as they): But take not friends from their ranks until they flee in the way of Allah (From what is forbidden). But if they turn renegades, seize them and slay them wherever ye find them; and (in any case) take no friends or helpers from their ranks."

Quran (8:12) - "I will cast terror into the hearts of those who disbelieve. Therefore strike off their heads and strike off every fingertip of them" No reasonable person would interpret this to mean a spiritual struggle.

Quran (8:65) - "O Prophet, exhort the believers to fight..."

Quran (9:20) - "Those who believe, and have left their homes and striven with their wealth and their lives in Allah's way are of much greater worth in Allah's sight. These are they who are triumphant." The Arabic word interpreted as "striving" in this verse is the same root as "Jihad". The context is obviously holy war.

Quran (9:30) - "And the Jews say: Ezra is the son of Allah; and the Christians say: The Messiah is the son of Allah; these are the words of their mouths; they imitate the saying of those who disbelieved before; may Allah destroy them; how they are turned away!"

Dang guys, she said no negativity in the comment section. Seems like all the sudden everyone in the comment section are all experts in Islam. I don't judge. You do you boo. I don't know your family well so I'm not sure how I would tell them. You seem more comfortable with your mom so I would probably tell her first. Maybe buy her dinner somewhere at a restaurant and tell her. But yeah hope everything goes well.

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Thank you so much! <3 LOL. I even said no negativity. But it's whatever. It's numbing to me, and I honestly don't care what people think anymore. It's my belief.

Eerrrr when you say you embrace all of Islam, I hope you don't actually mean ALL of it?Coz there's some ugly shit in the Quran Same in all religions tbf, but the Quran has a particularly large amount of worrying stuff...

Look if you're going to just cherry pick the bits you agree with and ignore the bad stuff, why even call yourself a Muslim?

Beating wives is not acceptable in quranAnd the 9yo thing, people at that time has a different nature , Alexander did a lot of victories while he was very young, unlike now a 16 yo boy can't even handle his girlfriend, I mean we can't judge something happened 1000 years ago by now standard and think like now standard was used all timeAccording to anti Islamic statistics, compared with general statistics, and some simple calculations, the result was that non Muslim man are twice as dangerous as Muslimwww.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2030364-do-anybody-trust-math-or-not-this-timeYou can ask anything anytime , I don't guarantee I have all the answers but I can help

There is a verse specially for your situationAnd We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.But if they endeavor to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do.Surat lukman (31:14-15)

I hope you know that Islam is anything but a peaceful religion. There's over 109 verses in the Quran calling on Muslims to commit violence. It's two greatest commandments are "Belief in Allah and Jihad in His cause" (Muslim 1:149).

It's your business. However, you couldn't have picked a worse time to conver to Islam. MostAmericans hate Mudkims and aren't quiet about it. Also, women are treated very badly in Islam. But at the end of the days, it's your choice.

just dont convert as simple as that and am not hating islam right now i dont say that it is the worst religion in the planet and that u will not have any rights as a woman and a human being basicly thats what i do just dont do it watch how badly women are treated in asia where islam is one of the most popular religions and how they rape and kill with out care believe me life is too small to spend it that way

What Girls Said 18

Our problem is incomplete knowledge about any religion and belief. We just hear stories, fictions and perverted truth without analyzing and going through basic scriptures. It is not peculiar to Christians only. Muslims are also equally ill-informed and biased. Sometimes reading a sentence from scripture gives either negative or distorted version. It's background and related commandments clear the picture. For example, Quran says: "Don't go near the prayer..."Apparently it commands you NOT TO PRAY, but it is half commandment; the remaining is "when you are intoxicated". Here everything becomes clear.So I would suggest you to read good translation of Quran (preferably by Pickthal or Arberry). They were not Muslims, but also not biased. Don't go for books written by any fundamentalist, be Christian, Muslim or from any other religion. Quran itself says: Ponder over it (Quran)" and also " There is no compulsion in religion". When and whatever Muslim fanatics have done, or do, it is not Quran and Islam, they use Islam for their own motives. So take sometime, ready Quran thoroughly, and then decide. God/Allah of Christians and Muslims is One.

Think about it long and hard and research and give yourself longer to decide. You're 18, it's easy to get swept up in the romanticisation of religions. You may not feel the same in a year or two from now and Islam is a big commitment. Do all your research first. This is probably what your parents will say to you. I have no hatred for any religion though I get enough hatred for mine (I list myself as a LaVey Satanist) and everyone should be able to practice in peace but make sure you're making the right choice for yourself. You're still young, you've still so much to explore and discover and religion can be a heavy commitment.

It entirely depends on your family, for example my brother's bestfriend comes from a traditional italian catholic family and they weren't delighted to hear it so they just asked him to wait a few more years to make it official but he already converted ( privately).But the other converts i know don't seem to have a problem. One of my friends also converted her father wasn't happy at first but he still loves her, her mother converted as-well.Good luck :)

No problem :) and I'm sorry for all the hate opinions :( anyways if there's anything that your confused about or have any questions about Islam you can always ask and I'll try my best to help :) you should watch yusuf easts videos he was a christen da converted to Islam I'm pretty sure listening to his story will help you with yours.. then there's Abdul Raheem green listen to his one as well they will help you understand more...

1) Congratulations you are already a Muslim as long as you believe oneness of God and Muhammad as messenger of God. you don't have to do anything special to become a Muslim.

2) you said "I have studied about Islam. Everything makes sense. and It touches your heart," do you know why? because Allah says in the Quran 5:83 "And when they hear what has been revealed to the Messenger, you see their eyes overflowing with tears because of what they have recognized of the truth. They say, "Our Lord, we have believed, so write us down among the witnesses." to understand this verse check out "LISTEN TO QURAN SOCIAL EXPERIMENT" on YouTube.

4) you said "I am debating about just converting without anybody knowing i. e your parents/siblings" please watch this video it explain How to Give Da`wah to Non-Muslim Parentshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5adFHRzxDo

6) just placing it in my room for them to see to figure things out. buy this CD title similarities christianity between Islam by Dr zakir naik or you may ask your sister to watch it on Youtubehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_M1PcTlYalk

first of all i think its really brave of you to consider conversion of any sort and especially to Islam at a time like this where everyone thinks we're hiding bombs in our socks & grenades up our asses lmao.

you should definitely be sure that this is what you WANT to do because conversion is huge step. Also read up some more into the verses of quran and really understand the meaning of what it has to say. maybe talk to some muslim friends if you have any and get their different outlooks on it. i was born into the religion and i love it. it teaches me a lot about love and patience and kindness towards myself and others. however being born into it may cause me to be biased so you should really look into it in depth and see if its what you truly want and believe.

as for your parents i think you should sit them down and talk to them with your sister and explain what you've learnt about the religion and why you want to convert. talk to them about what intrigues you and what drove you to make the decision. maybe get your sister to support you on it if things become tense and awkward. Islam and Christianity aren't identical and have MANY differences but there are a few things that crossover in the bible and the quran and we share a few beliefs; maybe that might be reassuring to them if you explain. it can go two ways, they either accept your decision or they dont. you practicing a faith doesn't hurt anyone or affect them from practicing theirs.

i really hope the ignorant comments on this post aren't getting to you, i feel like when people dont understand something they automatically hate or fear it instead.

i googled a little and found this website, you might find it useful or maybe you could get your parents to have a look. it gives an overview/insight into islam for non-muslims. it might hep their understanding of your decision. it wouldn't let me add the link but its called intorductiontoislam. org.

i hope whatever decision you make, you are truly happy and content and i hope your parents are understanding of your situation.

Talk to your parents about their thoughts about Islam and their opinion on that. Maybe drop small hints here or there and perhaps even involving them in the discussion of what you plan to do will make it easier for them to understand.

Just make sure you make a proper decision before you go ahead with anything. Best of luck and I hope you find what you're looking for

Do it at your own pace, Lyndsey. Tell them when you are ready. There's no time restraint. Faith is a deeply personal thing and is your business before anyone else's including your family. You have your sister's support. That's great. That can be enough for now if you want.

I feel you girl, i've been open with my family from the beginning and let them know that i want to choose my own religion as i don't really feel connected to the one most of the family practices, just let them know, your not trying to disrespect their beliefs you just feel like this is for you.

Welcome to Islam 😊 You mentioned that your parents are open minded and your mother has an idea why not approach her first and take the help of your sister? Plus be very respectful with your parents if you have to debate. Good luck!

Ummmm... I've been learning a little more about Islam lately and it isn't exactly some peaceful, love-filled religion. Not saying there aren't good people who identify as Muslim's, but the more I learn about it the more Islam scares the shit out of me.

Have you read the part about the Houri yet in the Hadiths and the Quran? What with their big boobs and men having the sexual strength of 100 men in the afterlife? Have you read the part about how men can have four wives except for the "messenger" who can have as many as he pleases? Mohammad preached an eye for an eye. Jesus preached the opposite. "Turn to him the other cheek". I'm not even religious. But I know both religions very well. Just think about it please. I once converted, too. Or reconverted. Then, I began to read deeper and I realised that this was not the rwligion for me. The more I read and heard and saw, the more I didn't like.

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Anonymous

Before converting you need to know a lot more than just part of the quran. You also need to know that quran is not enough to actually practice islam as the muslims follow not only the quran but also the hadith which is basically things that are being said were said by Muhammad. Moreover you need to know that as a mere mortal you are in no position to interpret the holy text and need someone else for you to do the thinking. Once you enter the religion you can never leave. If you one day decide to leave, Islam's instructions are to kill you because your blood is now hallal.

Good luck

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Anonymous

Your parents don't care about religion as you stated. So why is this a concern?

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Anonymous

just tell them... they said you can believe in w/e you wanna believe in and your sister who is a strong christian accepted that... ease them into it i guess

i know a dutch girl who's family is... well I don't know religion was just never really a part of thier life , they didn't hate it but they didn't like it... like w/eshe converted like last year or earlier this year and is now engaged to a muslim guy and her family is very happy for her and they love her fiancee and his family and all that and there is this other British guy i used to know... he converted in like 2011 and he has a bad relationship with his dad, his family is catholic, his grandma is very strong catholic... etc he is a muslim now and his family accepts it (he is married to a muslim woman now too) and his dad, well they kinda clashed a bit at first but he IS a grown man lolbut his father was like "you gonna be a terrorist now and kill ppl" and all that lol but yea things kinda settled later on :) and i haven't heard much from him lol

and ill message you some stuff.. I don't know if they are allowed here or not i dont want my comment to get deleted :P lel xD

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Anonymous

You should do more than read just a little of the Bible and Quran before converting to anything, IMHO. Attend some services, read all you can, etc.

Conversion is a very personal journey to make. While social community is one part of many people's religious life, the main relationship is between you and God.

It sounds like your family is open minded and respects your beliefs. When you're truly ready, don't hunt around - share your heartfelt experience that brought you to your faith.