When office politics threaten

DEAR JOYCE: As a single parent and a supervisor in my company, I don't want to change jobs unless the roof falls in. My gigantic problem is a peer supervisor who constantly undermines me so that he can look good. Suggestions? -- No initials.

For starters, consider these suggestions for defending yourself and your turf against the encroachment and warfare of your enemy:

-- Wear your game face. Whenever you come into contact with your foe, behave as though you are being videoed for a screening before the whole office -- or the big boss. Civility never hurt anyone's reputation.

For formal meetings, your counter moves can include such classic tactics as sending an email to your adversary in advance of the meeting and including a third-person witness in the discussion. After the meeting, send a confirmation email to your nemesis spelling out your understanding of the division of responsibilities and copying the executive to whom you report.

-- Develop meeting savvy. Anticipate what your response will be when your foe attempts to sandbag you before others at a meeting. When you're the target of a phony criticism from left field, freeze a smile on your face, and then quietly and calmly rebut with something like this: "I appreciate your bringing this to my attention, although, as I'm sure you'll realize after thinking about it, this is an inappropriate forum. After the meeting, why don't you show me exactly where my data errors are?"

If that easy approach doesn't cool the issue, and the building isn't on fire, suggest that you both meet later with your mutual boss to more closely examine the issues. You will be seen as an unflappable administrator while your competitor will be seen as a hot head.

-- Find a pinch hitter. Assuming that your mutual boss doesn't favor your foe over you, let the boss know that joint projects might have better outcomes for the company if you could work with the despised colleague's assistant -- and he with yours. Try to avoid boring your mutual boss with the detailed depths of your ongoing conflict. The other guy may be the jerk, but you could be the one replaced.

-- Change the location. For office eruptions, be the grown-up and suggest continuing the conversation in your office. Countless words about managing office politics have appeared in books and blogs over decades; find some of them by searching for "workplace conflict resolution."

DEAR JOYCE: My 24-year-old son's been offered a fine position several states away -- but without an employment contract. He's hesitant to ask for one. He says I worry too much. -- C.H.

Your answer: "You don't worry enough." Employment contracts typically are reserved for senior-level executives, but a job offer letter is standard, especially when the new hire is relocating or quitting a current job.

The offer letter should spell out key details of the agreement. Your son should browse for "employment offer letters" to compile a reasonable list of points beyond compensation that the letter should include.

DEAR JOYCE: I had a weird experience on a job board that leads me to wonder how often scam artists masquerade as legitimate employers. The so-called recruiter insisted on interviewing me online rather than on the phone. Have you written about job scams? -- J.A.L.

I've written about job scams many times, but not lately. Most people know about envelope stuffing scam jobs and identity-theft phishing, but a description of a hustle I hadn't seen before sounds like the situation you describe. A version of it is described on an unsigned blog that you can find at jobhuntingstress.wordpress.com.

(Email career questions for possible use in this column to Joyce Lain Kennedy at jlk@sunfeatures.com; use "Reader Question" for subject line. Or mail her at Box 368, Cardiff, CA 92007.)