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▐ DEARDIARY #9▐ Someone hate or dislike you , Never Take It Personally.

13 March 2018

So here comes another Dear Diary post. It's another heart to heart talking post again. Actually I suppose to post this last week but I decided to hold on this and now I guess I completed the whole post and it's time to talk about it and to share my thoughts on this.

This March is full of surprise and feelings. I accepted some interviews from Magazine, I went for shooting, I attended 4 events straight for a day and even on air. I stepped out from my comfort zone again and a little taste of how a busy life could really exhausted for me. When I was a kids, I always dream to be a star, envy about people can dress up nicely or people who born with a pretty face which makes their life easier.

My life isn't easy at all. From what I had now is all from my hard work. I never rely on anyone else but myself. I understand how things work and truly know what's important to me. If you read this post (click here) I wrote 3 years back then you know what happened. In the past three years, I always afraid to be in front because I'm always afraid to accept the reality that I'm as pretty as the standard of pretty that set by the public.

From that incident, I know I just suitable be in front of the lap top. Not in the public because I don't have the standard pretty face that everyone love. I don't have a sharp chin, a very sexy body or either way to make me stand up. I'm just that little girl who only life better in my own world. I don't wanna get hurt, I just wanna be me. So, after that I never really accept any close face shoot on the magazine because I think, I'm not suitable and I don't wanna even wish there is the second experience like the hair shoot again.

So during the 3 years time, I decide whatever that I want. I do whatever makes me happy. After that, I realise some people just hate me for being me. Or dislike me for no reason. I had a very close friend few years back, who no longer my close one anymore. She dislikes me and I feel so sad about it. I cried , I depressed and I asked WHY?? I think I even express it on my blog few years back. That's the period of me, being so down and I can't sleep every night. I keep asking myself, why? Is that because of me but I really treat her so good and never think of one day we aren't friends anymore. All my closed friends know about this, they always tell me like what even bother you. It's just small thing you know, Chanwon you should grow up and see the real world.

I was like, no one giving me a good explanation. Until one day, one of my elder friends who saw me really sad and cry in front of her. She told me, Chanwon a? What's actually bother you? Can't you just ignore? I replied her ' I just don't even know the reason, WHY?' She told me that I will laugh at myself few years later. I was like wtf are you talking about and be like 😯???? Now I know why she told me all of these. She's 7 years older than me. What she told me is the truth actually. lol

She asked me 'chanwon you see la, if someone throw a ball to you, you have two option right?'I answered like a student, I said' YES!'Then she continue, she said' You can catch the ball or throw the ball away back to her or maybe just don't take it. Am I right?'I told her ' Yes of course la! What's this stupid question all about lol'She laughed and told me ' Now she throw this ball (problem) to you, you actually have the option for not keeping the ball for yourself. You can throw it back to her or throw it away right? Why you take it personally?' I immediately shocked and I was like 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 一句點醒了我

Three years after, now! All of these have brought me to a real lesson. Which is, Never Take It Personally. I'm not sure how even this related to your life, but I'm this is from my experience and I treat you guys like my own family. I wish that you are a person with kind heart and shine from inner out. Not just a person with only pretty face and got nothing inside.

So 3 years after, I finally achieved what I want and overcome it. I'm so happy to share this with you guys. In our life, we met new people every time. There is no guarantee that everyone LOVE you. Nobody is perfect and even you are 100% perfect, there is someone behind you actually dislike you, hate you and talk about you.

That's the reality. No matter how good you are, people judge. No matter how kind you are, there is someone who take you for granted. Whether you experience this or not, or your really closed friend tell you someone say you aren't pretty or don't deserve anything in your life. Please don't take it personally.

Nothing other people do is because of you. It's always because of THEMSELVES.

I'm always on the social medias. A platform where people normally see my photos, and think what's my life. People only know me from the photos, not the real me and people who watched my daily stories, will know what's all these behind the scene story. Watching me talking like a crazy with pyjamas and my no makeup face.

Then ever since I started to get active in stories, friends around me feel very surprise that I'm so daring. To be myself and at the same time, there are some people dislike about me. For being too 38, or just think I'm not pretty, I don't deserve this and that and don't even know why I have such numbers of followers. They don't find me attractive or interesting, they asked my friend why I'm not pretty and still, I have you guys.

I have that 1 second heart attack when I hear it from my really close friends. But I'm so good to have them and you guys in my life because without you guys, I won't be here today. You and my really closed friends are the most down-to-earth friends for me. All of you were so supportive toward me for the past few years in my life. But just because I'm a blogger, I get judge, I get comment and normally people hate you will just hate and talk behind you.

They will never say it in front of you. They become the keyboard warriors, they create anonymous account to hurt you. I rarely received hate comment but I remember few months ago, that's my first so called hater who dm me telling me some kind of naughty comments about me. If I told you that I wont be sad then it was a lie. It's so mean and I get very emotional for few seconds and then I just be calm and told myself that, even someone dislike me, that's not my problem. Is their problem.

Recently, I received an interview opportunity with Saime Malaysia and if you are interested you may click hereto read the interview story.

There is one important thing I wish to educate you guys. Whatever people think about you, whether telling that you are ugly, hate you for this or dislike you for that, as long as you knowing what you have done is correct , then you feel so sad like 'wtf am I doing, why I deserve this?!!' Next, you feel emotional break down, depress of this and that, cried over and over again & blablablablaa...

Let me tell you that, that's their problem. They are just throwing their problem to you. Each individual's has diff perspective, preference, thing we personally like and dislike. A person who don't think you are pretty, it's just from their perspective. What they said about you is just from themselves, NOT EVERYONE IN THE WORLD.

You lovely parents, your siblings, your friends and everyone around you, love you because it's YOU. One person said you are stupid that's their problem only. Not saying that YOU ARE REALLY STUPID. People really selfish will only look at one angle, they never see the future or the 360 degree of something. That's why never simply judge or criticise someone without knowing the truth.

So that person who said that I'm can't be on stage, there is no one gonna love this look of my face, there is no opportunity for me, I can't be success, I can't this and that & etc. Just take it easy, take a deep breath, telling yourself that you are not going to take it personally. it's their problem not you. You should continue work hard for yourself and one day, they gonna feel sorry for hurting your small little heart and telling someone that you can't.

There are always people who dislike you for nothing. They got no reason at all. So just forget about it. I should learned this few years back and I could achieve more rather than taking it personally and hide at a corner, cried and sad. There is no one come to me and telling me that, Chanwon you got nothing wrong. You should move forward or mostly people will just tell you like " please ignore la, you should care about that'

But indeed you know, that wouldn't help because there is no explanation for you. I just feel like WHY WHY WHY? Any answer?!! So I'm here to tell you the answer and I guess this could benefit you and changed your perspective.

I really don't want you to face the same thing repeatedly and feel helpless. So please, whatever happens around you, don't take it personally. 不要把別人套在你身上的話，聽得太深。They don't deserve to be an obstacle in your life, you can achieve better. They couldn't stop you for moving forward.

They think you are stupid is just because THEY THINK. It's not always equal to everyone else in the world and don't take it serious. Just take a deep breath, move forward and nothing they did and said is because of you, it's just because of themselves. So if this happened on you, just be with people who love you, don't step into that black hole again and be so negative about your life.

That's a note for myself and also for the people I love.

Don't ever take it personally. Each of you are beautiful in your own way so always remember that and I hope you can be happy about yourself, be confident about yourself. Accepted who you are, your perfect imperfections and be happy. Remember to live your life to the fullest and you can be someone better than me.

I hope everyone of you can move forward and just be the Happy you. Good thing will be attract by your positivity and will come to you soon!You are welcome to share this with your friends if you think this post is useful and helpful to them. All the best sweeties and I'm gonna work continue my work now. See you on my next post. Love, xoxo.

Thank you Chan Won for this post! I totally understand how you feel because I’m also that kind of person who gets sad/ depressed easily when people hate me :( I also always ask myself what did I do wrong that made them hate me. But then I slowly understand and started to learn to ignore those stuffs because what for I waste my time for all those problem make myself sad for that kind of stuffs? The person who hate me probably is very happy doing his/her own stuff or hang out with his/her friend when I’m here being emotional and depressed. So I just wanted to say thank you for creating and writing this post, because I believe there are still many people out there who thinks alike like us, still struggling for this kind of problem and depressed or even cry alone and they really need to see this post! Thank you Chan Won and glad to knowthat you have pass through your depressed stage ��❤️�� Let’s jia you together!!! *Fighting*