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Not too long ago I spent a Sunday in London filming with the incredible House of Sinn and what a Sunday it was. If you have read my blog before you might know that I have met all the people from House of Sinn a few times now and it is always a pleasure, I am a big big fan of both Mistress Ezada and Lady Yna and also very much enjoy catching up with everyone else involved.

This filming day I was filming with Mistress Ezada (for the first time so was very excited about that) and with Lady Mephista , for those of you that don’t know Lady Mephista is a stunning German Domme who loves her latex and rope bondage, and I can confirm is very good with a strap on as well as having legs that go on for ever! We actually did this filming the day after the Femdom ball and if anyone tells you I was out until 4am drinking wine the night before then they are lying…….maybe…..

One sure way of eliminating any tired feelings in the morning though is the promise of filming with two stunning dominant women! So I quickly got over the sleepy early start that may or may not have been due to me being out till 4am the night before.

I ended up doing 6 clips both with Mistress Ezada and Lady Mephista together, and some with just Lady Mephista. It was a real mix of clips and I really felt like I was put through my paces which doesnt always happen when filming. For me the day started quite slowly and easily (the calm before the storm) with Lady Yna helping me with my make up before shooting the first scene which was abit of boot worship with Lady Mephista and her beautiful boots. I am not going to go into a lot of details for all the clips, you can see what we got up to on the House of Sinn website when they are released, but I do want to talk about a few of them because they were intense! So as well as the boot worship clip we also did a spanking, two caning/whipping clips, a spit roast strap on and a bondage/strap on. It is fair to say I was physically and mentally exhausted after the last clip!

By far the most intense and most difficult clips that we did though were the caning and whipping clips. Now you might already know that I do have quite a bit of experience in the pain side of bdsm and it is actually something I enjoy, but this was a first. The idea of the clip was that Ezada likes the whip the most and Mephista likes the cane the most so they would both use them on me to show each other why they thought their implament was the better one. I am not hugely experienced with the whip and this hurt! It was very intense having cane, whip, cane, whip and the two deliver a very different feeling and a very different type of pain. I was at my pain limit by the end of the second clip and once the camera was off there were a few tears. I was smiling and crying at the same time, it is still slightly confusion for me as I am not used to all this crying, but I do know that it is hard to beat in terms of a feeling of release, at the time nothing else really matters and I love that.

Oh and for the record I prefer the cane to the whip so I am with Lady Mephista here, although I can confirm that they both bloody hurt!

After a bit of a break and a change of outfit we carried on with the filming with the strap on scenes. I am not going to go into lots of detail because you can see from the pictures what we did, so I will just stay it was very fun!

After filming these clips I was exhausted, a quick change and a bit of time to chill out before I headed off tried, in pain and happy. I can’t wait to film with the Hous if Sinn again soon!

The other week I headed over to Cate Fury’s to do some filming with herself Nikki Whiplash and Chloe Lovette. This was the first time I had been to Cate’s new place and I have to say I loved it. It feels like a beautiful little gem hidden away in the countryside, surrorunded the great outdoors. To be honest I couldn’t actually tell you where it was even if I wanted to, other than past a field of cows and over a cattle gird! Either way the trusty Sat Nav never fails and I arrived just before the first scene was about to start.

The filming was for Cate’s soon to be launched brand new clip store (keep an eye out for this!) and there where afew subs there on the day for filming to cover a wide range od different kinks. It was good to see Nadders again in the flesh and if you know who he is you should not be surprised that there was a few ball busting clips being filmed that day! As well as the ball busting there was some trampling, strap on and playing with a vac bed. I wasnt involved in them but still very much enjoyed wathcing them from the other side of the camera.

Once the first clip was finished Cate gave me a hand with my make up, and by gave me a hand, I do of course mean Cate pretty much did my make up and I have to say I thought it looked great. Once that was done and I was dressed (yes I was the last to be ready again) we headed outside to do the first of the two clips I was involved in on the day. This clip was a bit of a mix of things, there was a guy being human furniture, a guy being the ladies ash tray and I basically got to worship and kiss Cate’s boots, I personally thing I got the best job there! lots of fun.

The next clip being filmed was a ball busting clip so obviously I ran away and watched from the behind a wall in Cate’s garden. There is something fasinating about watching something that I know I couldn’t do or wouldn’t want to do, or a mixture of both. I have so much respect for the subs that do these it must hurt like hell! Saying that though you could clearly tell the guy getting kicked was enjoying it, it seemed that it was a case of the harder the kick the harder the.., well you know, the guy😉

The second clip I filmed was a caning clip, again we did it outside and after a bit of a warm up with a paddle ( I think ), all three took it in turns to give me a caning. I have never been caned by different people so close together and I was amazed when Cate told me that they used the same cane because each felt very different, I could have sworn they were different canes, he only thing in common was that they all hurt!

After a little bit of a chill out, a chat and a cup of tea it was time to hit the road again with a glowing red bum after a really fun day spend at Cate Fury’s. Don’t forget to keep an eye out for Cate’s new clip store when it gets released and ofcourse go check out me being caned by three beautiful Dominant ladies!

Not too long along Vivienne and I headed up to Edinburgh for a long weekend filled with fun and frolics. Vivenne has in the last few months been making the trip up to Edinburgh once a month to session from ‘Original Sin’ dungeon in the heart of the city and I was lucky enough to join her this time. As soon as Viv asked if I would like to join her I obviously said yes and was really looking forward to spending some time with her, seeing her do her thing in session and even taking part in some of the sessions. All of which I am happy to say happened and all of which were great fun.

We headed up on the long drive early on Saturday morning and arrived mid afternoon at the dungeon. After a very quick change from both of us (it is fair to say doing make up in a dark dungeon is not my speciality) we were straight into a session. This first session was one I was to be involved in with a very nice guy who enjoyed being transformed into a sissy as well as having a thing for needles. Now I think I should explain something here, I am scared of needles. I have very few hard limits when I am sub now but needles still remains on that list.I was told it was very different doing the sticking (for want of a better word) to being stuck so although nervous about it I was happy (mostly) to give it a go.

As this was a session with someone else I am not going to go into all the details but I learnt quite a bit and it was a bit of an eye opener in a good way. I enjoyed it and even the needles part was ok, infact even the needles part was a lot of fun! It is also safe to say I never thought I would be able to say that this one time in Edinburgh I pierced someones nipple, turns out I can now!

For most of the rest of the day Vivenne was busy with sessions in which I was not needed to be around (She is VERY popular in Edinburgh!) so I spend the day wondering around the city, drinking coffee and then watching the football which the occassion trip back to the dungeon inbetween sessions to bring Viv some much needed supplies! Edinburgh is a beautiful city, makes me glad Viv doesn’t do tours somewhere like Hull or Swindon……no offence….

The next day followed a similar pattern with Vivienne busy with sessions and me being involved in a few. I did get to see Vivienne use her brand new tawse on a guy and it has to be said I was very impressed how well he took it. One of the highlights of the weekend was that it was the first time I had seen Vivienne in session with a sub. I mean obviously we have done a lot together and we have filmed etc but it was really enjoyable to see Vivienne in full swing (pun intended) doing her thing, she really is very very good at it!

We took a break from the dungeon in the afternoon and spend a great afternoon at the beach which was a lot of fun and much needed for Viv I think as she had only really seen the four walls of the dungeon for the last two days.

We then returned for the last session of the weekend with a very nice guy Vivienne had seen before and again it was one I was involved with. I think for most of it I was more like Vivienne’s ‘beautiful’ assistant fetching toys or cuffs etc which she tied him up and got him to do a few other things. Things got a bit more hands on towards the end and Vivienne got me to put on a show for them both using a toy at one stage. This was a lot of fun and no surprises to hear I don’t mind an audience but when Vivienne told me to use the toy as he told me to, I quickly discovered that is not something I enjoy, but I guess you don’t know until you try. Overall though it really was a fun session to be involved in!

On the return back to Derby we stopped overnight at Governess Ely’s for a little femdom party. It had been a long time since seeing Ely so was great to catch up and see her new place. The party itself was with Miss Mog, Governess Ely , Vivienne l’Amour and Lady Rebecca and I did get a bit of a spanking/caning/tawsing (is that a word) from them. I also got to see Vivienne using her whip on a sub which was great and something I would love to see again but for me the most enjoyable part was being able to have a little catch up with Ely.

Me and Viv then headed back to Derby with Miss Mog to end another really great weekend.

If you follow this blog then this post might come as a bit of shock to you, although if you really do know me then it really might not.

Recently I have been having these urges to explore again, this need to try things and excitement thinking about new and unexplored experiences. These sorts of feelings have felt quite similar to how I felt when first exploring kink in general (although I am much older and wiser now….). Just like 4 or 5 years ago there is a overwhelming urge to act on them, but this time the feelings have been of the dominant nature.

Well thats the background to things out the way, now on to the juicy middle. During a weekend at Viv’s a few weeks ago I got to explore these dominant feelings and first things first I want to thank Vivienne for enabling me to do so and suggesting I try being Domme with her other sub Sammie. I also want to thank Sammie for letting someone with very limited experience at this take control!

So to start with Vivienne showed me where some of the things were kept and gave me a few ideas on what to do, I think she sensed the nerves and hesitation to begin with. She then said she would like to take pictures as we played but would not be get involved to see how it panned out. She also told me she thought I would be fine and she was confidence I knew what I was doing. At the point I will admit it was both exciting and slightly daunting.

Now I am used to being in a dungeon and I think I know what pretty much everything is used for, and have had a lot of things used on me, but this was the first time where I have stood in a dungeon with someone waiting for me to tell them what to do. It was the first time that it was completely my decision what to use, what to do and how to do it and I have to admit although there were nerves, I really enjoyed that feeling!

I started off with Sammie being in the very lucky position of being told to worship my feet for a while but I had already decided that it was mainly hitty things that I wanted to use. This was probably partly because as a sub I have a lot of experience with them. I understand how all of them feel and understand the difference between the ‘ouch but please don’t stop’,the ‘oh my fucking god that hurts please don’t do that again, ok maybe once more’ and the ‘I can’t take much more’ type of pain. I knew Sammie hadn’t done much pain play with Vivienne so I was very kind, to start with….. We played with a crop, a cane and a few other things, I had Sammie tied up in some very simple ways and had Sammie sucking on a few toys after hearing she liked things in her mouth. During all the pain play I kept Sammie counting the hits and giving me pain ratings out of 10 which I think worked well and was actually just as much for my benifit as it was for Sammie’s as it alouded me to quickly work out what was ‘soft’ what was ‘hard’ and what was ‘very hard’ (Vivienne later used a similar thing with me but to a far more extreme way, but have patience, we will get to that later).

I really did feel like I grew into the session as it went on and the confidence lacking at the start only increased throughout. At the beginning I found myself looking over to Viv after doing something, kind of hoping for approval that is was ok I guess. After about 5 or 10 mintues this stopped, I stopped thinking about if I was doing it right, what ever that means, and just started to enjoy it. After that the session went really quickly and I kinda of didn’t want it to stop, I know Viv enjoyed watching, I’m pretty saw Sammie enjoyed it and I sure as hell enjoyed it. Now I can’t wait to do it again, I think it has only made me more curious about wanting to try new things, and you know what, that is really very fucking exciting!

The next day though Vivienne decided to remind me of my place, and that place is very much happily submissive to Goddess Vivienne. This involved amongst other things, one hell of a caning! I am not going to go into any detail about what we did other than the caning itself and the fact that this was by far the most intense pain I have ever been able to take. Vivienne used the number game I played with Sammie the day before but with a twist, with Sammie I ended the session by saying when you have recieved one number 10 on the pain scale I will stop, with Vivienne we ended with 1 hit at 1, 2 at 2, 3 and 3 etc etc all the way up to 10 at 10.

If you have been reading this blog recently you will know this isn’t the first time Vivienne has pushed my limits and it excites me every time she does, I love that she is doing that. We are also getting to know each other more and more and it surprises me how well she can read me and work out what I am thinking. I am starting to be able to do the same with her now and there is a moment when Vivienne is giving out CP where she switches slightly, there is a slight change of expression and I really can see it in her eyes, its almost a more raw powerful energy she has. I know at that point she is really enjoying herself. It is that point that is my favourite time of any CP play we have done and its largely that stuble change and hightened enjoyment I sense from her that makes me want to carry on and allows me to take more. Saying that though I do still stuggle sometimes and find it difficult to really let go emotionally and as a submissive (but im learning). I really felt like I did do both of them this time thought and it felt great. It was exactly what I needed and reminded me that although these new dominant feelings are really exciting, being submissive to Vivienne tops the lot.

After the caning and when Vivienne had untied me, I was in tears, laying on the floor, hugging Vivienne’s leg with my head in her lap when she asked me two questions, both of which had the same reply.

‘To whom do you belong Jessica’

‘To you Goddess’

‘To whom do you belong *insert boy name*’

‘To you Goddess’

Through the tears a huge smile slowly spread across my face, I hadn’t been this happy for a long long time. I have never given myself to someone like that before and all I remember thinking was that I didn’t want to be anywhere else, I didnt want that moment to end.

A few weeks ago Vivienne came down to visit me in Bristol for the first time which meant I got to show her my flat and where I live and a very small part of Bristol which I really liked being able to do. It makes things more real if thats the right choice of words and if that makes sense (it does in my head).

But the visit was not all about seeing my flat and meeting my flatmate, we had a dungeon to explore!

A few weeks previous to this visit I had attended a kinky party at a new dungeon owned, built and run by a friend and had a really good night. This time Vivienne and I were heading back to this dungeon for some play and for some pictures to be taken and for Vivienne to meet the owner. It was just going to be still photos we were doing but I thought that actually worked out really well because we asically played, and as we played the photographer Simon (big thank you to you for this) took pictures. For the large part of it we paid little or no attention to the camera which means some of the pictures are just fully raw and fully natural and in my exeperience it is a rare thing to have these really natural pictures with a Domme that I truly want to serve, submit to and try and please, I REALLY enjoyed that. As with every time I play with Vivienne (actually that should say every time Vivienne plays with me) I have loved it, she does things to me that very few people have done before and I plan on writing a whole seperate post about this soon, so expect to see lots more on here about how fantastic I think Vivienne is, but I think this comes across on some of these pictures so well, there is nothing staged or exaggerated in these ones.

I’m not going to go into loads of details as to what we did as the pictures explain that but needless to say I loved it. We were in the dungeon for a good few hours and there was rope, there was caning, there was worshiping Vivienne and there was even unlocked of the chastity device.Then in the next few days I had the quite enjoyable task of going through the 900 pictures and first picking the best 60, and then I picking my absolute favourites which I have posted here (I know I spoil you).

I loved the pictures for so many different reasons. I loved them because I really liked the make up Vivienne did for me, the lighting in the dungeon looked great and of course Vivienne looked fantastic, but most of all I loved some of the pictures because it showed me and Vivienne playing, and not playing for the camera or playing for anyone but just playing.

Recently I was lucky enough to go and spend a weekend with Vivienne L’Amour at hers in Derby where we did some filming for her new website Fetishandfuckery, played a little off camera, did an interview (will post that here soon) and got to know each other a little more. Im going to start this post by saying what a fantastic weekend I had!

I had met Vivienne a few times before this weekend and seen her in action when we both were filming for English Mansion last year but even in that shoot we didnt really have any direct contact so before arriving I had yet to experience Vivienne being dominant with me first hand but having seen a few videos and clip it is fair to say that I was excited to change this fact.

I arrived on the saturday and we decided that the filming side of things could wait until sunday. Instead, on the saturday evening we did the interview, which will be posted on here asap. I should point out Vivienne decided she would like to do the interview while she was in the bath, talk about being distracted while im trying to think of follow up questions to her answers, not that I was complaining thought! Im excited to get that interview posted, I think its great one, even if i do say so myself so watch this space.

Later that evening we had abit of a play involving rope, wax and blindfolds and I have to say it was the highlight of my weekend, it felt amazing. Rope is a real love of mine even though I don’t do it enough, so to find out Vivienne was a fan as well, well let’s just say I was a happy bunny (Rope pun intended). What I really enjoyed about this was that I never knew what was going to happen next when we started played and that is always a real rush. I was blondfolded from the very start and as anyone that has experienced being bindfolded knows, as soon as you can’t see what is happening the other senses become highened. Every sounds becomes more important and most importantly for rope play every touch becomes so much more. I’m not actually 100% sure how I was tied because I didn’t actually see it and by the time Vivienne was finished I was so deep into my happy subby place I had stopped thinking about what was tied and what wasn’t, all I knew was I couldnt move much and I couldnt be happier about that. One thing that did surprise me with the rope was when Vivienne put some round my neck, it wasn’t tight but it did have the effect to causing a little extra adreniline rush, and I loved that.

Once I was all tied up Vivienne then gave me my next surprise and that was wax play. I have never done any sort of wax play before but I can tell you now, I plan to do it again very soon, I loved it. The feeling of the wax dripping on the skin and then hardening it a real mix of pain and pleasure. Although, to begin with It did actually take me a little while to realise what was happening, it was something I enjoyed a huge amount and it was a slightly new sensation. What I mentioned before about adding a blindfold highening the senses really played its part here. The combination of rope and hot wax dripping on the skin and Vivienne’s very skillful touches, strokes and stratches made the whole thing very sensual and very very enjoyable. I don’t know if she knew this at the time but I was basically like putty in her hands for most of that night, what ever she asked of me I probably would have done. Actually who am I kidding, of course she knew!!

Oh yeah I forgot to mention, Vivienne also had put one of her quite intense vibrators on me with the intentsity and speed continuing changing. Actually thinking back its no surprise this was the highlight of my weeknd and that I turned into a submissive putty for her, it was fucking awesome! That night I had a lot of kinky rope based dreams.

The next day was filming day and we did about 5 or 6 scenes altogher. We started in the dungeon and more specifically I started the first scene in Vivienne’s cage. Now at the risk of me spending a lot more time in there in the future I have to say it was actually very comfortable, but it Vivenne asks it was a real struggle…ssshhh thats our little secret. So the first scene was really just Vivenne talking to the camera and explaining she had me in her cage, locked in a chastity cage and I was there to do with as she liked, I was just lying in the cage behind her pn camera, trying and failing not to smile too much.

To be honest im struggling to remember the order and exactly what we did next but there was a lot boot worship and a lot of me on my knees in front of Vivenne. We did do a humiliation based clip where I had to repeat what Vivienne said about me and as you can imagine (or find out if you buy the clip) she was a little on the mean side, and this was new to me. Those of you that know me will know humiliation this isn’t my thing, it was good to actually try it but I know for sure it will never be something I enjoy. Maybe this comes across of camera and maybe thats a good thing, it might make it more realistic??

Next came a smoking fetish clip where I get a bit reluctant to do what I am told so am punished with a ‘forced’ sucking of strap on, followed by some real strap on action with a couple of strap ons, including what felt like a very large one, I liked this part of the day!

After a quick outfit change we were ready to go again with the last couple of clips, which were all about pain! It involved a spanking, flogging and caning. Now I don’t know if it was because Vivienne can hit very hard or because I am quite out of practice receiving the cane but these really hurt, and I liked that a lot. I will let you into a little secret here, the camera actually ran out of batteries during the caning but Vivienne decided I would still be getting everything she had promised, and if anything the caning just got harder off camera. I did however find myself really wanting to take the pain for her as it really felt like she was really enjoying it as well. Doing this scene really got me back in the subbmissive place I mentioned before with the rope and wax, and after we had finished Vivienne got me to have a lay down on the bed and I know I just had a stupid grim and dazed look on my face, I was one happy little kinky cross dresser.

You know when you have two really good things and you combine them to make something special, like strawberries and cream or fish and chips or pizza and beer or coke and ummm, like two cokes, well I would add another one to the list – English Mansion and Dungeon Manor. Allow me to explain. (I realise all those examples are food and drink related, I was hungry whilst writing this.)

If you have read my blog before the chances are you will know what a huge fan of The English Mansion I am and how much I love to go and film with them when ever I am given the opportunity. Also you might have seen that I visited Dungeon Manor recently and had a great couple of days there including a little bit of filming. So with that in mind you might be able to imagine I was a little excited about being asked if I would like to go to Dungeon Manor and film with English Mansion, two of my favourite Femdom places combined for one shoot! Obviously that is a huge yes please, sign me up! If I had to walk there then I would have (luckily my car was working and turned out to be the better method of travel, but you get my point) and I’m very happy to say that shoot is exactly what I was doing a few weeks ago.

I arrived at Dungeon Manor the evening before filming to be greeted by Ely with a big hug and a house full of people. I also was able to say hello in person for the first time to Ely’s sub charlotte, who is lovely. The house was full of people, a mixture of Dommes and subs and turned out to be sub training for house submissives for Pedestal but things seemed to be winding down for the evening as I arrived. This was only my second visit to Dungeon Manor but I am already realising you never know what to expect when you arrive there. There always seems to be something happening, it’s never dull and for someone that goes without kink for large periods of time its a fantastic feeling to immerse yourself into the kink lifestyle that surrounds the place. I personally love it and the feelings that come with that, plus Ely lives there so win win really!

The next day started with a relatively early start and the first thing planned was having our make up done by a professional make up artist. I have to say I loved having this done and was really happy with it after she had finished…. dare I say it but I don’t think I looked half bad. The hardest part now will be when I next do my own make up again and it goes back to looking like a small child did it! Still, I asked quite a lot of questions while she was applying different things and hopefully took away a little bit of her vast knowledge.

The filming itself was very different to any previous filming I had done in the past for two reasons, the first being that it was a group thing with 5 Domme ladies, Mistress Sidonia, Mistress Evilyne, Governess Ely, Goddess Miss Kelly and Mistress Vivienne l’Amour. Then there was me, charlotte, squealy and tiffany as the subs. The second difference with this filming was the fact that all the scenes were linked and followed one after the other, which I really liked the idea of.

The rough outline of the story was that we were at a Femdom party at a household run by Domme women, squealy had arrived at the house after answering an advert for a sub but upon arrival discovered that men are not welcome in this house and that meant he would be feminised, whether he liked it or not. All the ladies looked amazing with a mixture of beautiful ball gowns and latex/rubber dresses. Mistress Vivienne l’Amour looked incredible in her lime green latex dress and I have to admit I caught myself a couple of times throughout the day just looking at her in her dress thinking ‘wow, stunning’; I just hope this wasn’t picked up on camera…! Also my foot and leg fetish seems to be growing and Goddess Miss Kelly happened to be wearing a dress which showed off her legs perfectly, and I luckily got to have a closer look at them later in the day, but I will get to that in a bit.

When the filming started I didn’t really have to do much to start with other than pour the occasional glass of champagne as it was charlotte showing squealy how to be the perfect sissy to begin with followed by squealy getting quite a bit of abuse from almost all the ladies. While this was happening It didn’t take long for me to realise where squealy got his name from and some of the noises he was making really made it difficult to keep a straight face, I have to say though seeing what was happening to him, rather him than me is all I will say. This section of filming finished with squealy in a cage and us other three subs lined up for a bit of anal play, and in my case a bit of shoe worship with Goddess Miss Kelly at the same time which turned out to be a recurring theme of the day I am very glad to say.

The next section of the filming was my favourite part of the day even if it was technically my punishment. I was being punished for two reasons, the first thing was for me being lippy and the second for me not cleaning properly, I know what you are thinking, that doesn’t sound like me at all………. Governess Ely and Goddess Miss Kelly were dishing out my punishment and they both used a mixture of hitty things including a hairbrush (which actually hurt like hell), a few paddles and the cane. It had been a while since I had had the cane and I really did enjoy being caned by two beautiful Dommes, and loved the fact the marks lasted for a good few days after I got home. On a side note this was also the first time I had been caned with a butt plug in, adds a little something extra, highly recommended if you are into that sort of thing😉

The rest of the filming involved a smoking/spitting scene with all the Dommes and charlotte Then squealy (now feminised) was used by all the ladies again. To be honest I couldn’t tell you any details about what happened on the last scene even if I wanted to because the whole time I was worshipping both Governess Ely’s and Goddess Miss Kelly’s feet and at the time not much else mattered, despite squealy’s squeals of pain or pleasure or both??

So what did I miss, oh yeah there was also rope, chastity, pink bondage tape and I was given a new corset so all round another really fun day filming. A huge thank you goes out to everyone there for allowing me to be part of the day and especially to Mistress Evilyne and Mistress Sidonia for inviting me to come along and film, I really do enjoy it every time, thank you!