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Friday, 27 July 2012

Professional examination for year 1 is done, over, full stop, and the book has closed. It ended on last Monday the 23rd with OSPE. I must say OSPE was the savior among all those hard core short essays and multiple choice true and false questions. Probably because, most of the questions were already discussed during revision class, not the same questions but similar. But then again, everything came because of the Rahmah from Allah The Al Mighty.

The day when they said the result will be announced was terrifying. Everyone of us, the 83 students of Phase 1 were asked to gather in our lecture hall to know whether we have triumph or vice versa. It's so shaking I tell ya. Prof KJ, Dr Prabhakar Kore, Dr Rajshekar and some of our common lecturers were there waiting with us. The day before, 14 students were elected to attend the Viva interview with a few important panels. I am so proud to say 2 students from my A1 group were among the 14 students. Well, they deserve it as they had worked so hard literally.

Prof KJ were the one who announced the result. One by one our names were called out, and was asked to stand. Others gave their big round of applause. Prof KJ did offered some nerve wrecking moment when 2 of my friends weren't being called. Then, he said, "Saya memain je" and everyone broke into laughter. Alhamdulillah, all of my colleague has passed the first year successfully. Later, the distinction students were called out. They were five of them. I must say two of my non-muslim friends who sat beside me, Gan and Ryan really deserved to get distinction. They were very discipline, never playing truant and at utmost diligent. I am so proud to be sitting among them in the lecture hall. *event though I didn't get to join them for viva, I iz okay*

Three of the distinctions students were ex PASUM's students. They were as expected and had been smarty pants all these while. Hahaha. One of them didn't study that hard but because of her good deeds to many of us, Allah granted her the place she deserved. Then again, congratulations to all my friends. The hurdles we had overcome with victory. Now, let's enjoy the short break and this Ramadhan with the family.

I got three more days in Belgaum, which I fulfilled with shopping. Celebrating Ramadhan for the first time, a thousand miles from home is okay for me since the community I live in is so welcoming and nice to each other. Even though, we had hard time to know when was our first day of Ramadhan (since India is so huge and every state and city has different time for it to start the month of Ramadhan), it is still fun. And for Iftar, it is never a trouble. My roommate is a chef, so thanks a lot to her for making me fat and thanks a lot to her for acting like my 'mom', waking me up for Sehri. As for Taraweeh, I am so thankful we have many 'Imam Muda' to lead the prayers. I told you everything is perfectly fine here, alhamdulillah. Just worry less and pray more :D

Now that the results are known, and most of the friends already on their way back home to Malaysia, I still has tonnes to do like laundry (2nd cycle), and of course to clear up my desk since I am moving to a new room with a new room mate next year (September 2012 that is LOL). I just found out that we cannot stick to one person even though she or he is our best friend. Sometimes we need some space. And yes, not everybody can stand with our attitudes although we think we have done good enough. Just accept it that, certain people wanna act different ways. I hope this is like a new 'Hijrah' for me. I know my new roommate who is also a year older than me, will guide me better in every way. I wanna be like her, insyaALLAH. I wanna be like her who is so bold yet so polite and respected by all. I rest everything to Allah because after all, HE knows best for HIS servants. And only to HIM we pray, none others :)

Alas, Sayonara dear Belgaum. A place where I discover many new things in life, the place where I found many other friends who are so close to Allah and never get bored to invite us along. Praise to Allah The Al Mighty, for all his continuous blessings and Rahmah that 83 of us had such a good time as a family here. Praise to HIM for He has brought such a fatherly Prof KJ to us; that with his guidance we all had succeed the first year, and InsyaALLAH for the next 4 years; towards becoming great doctors for the Ummah. Plus, we are definitely keen to have many more juniors to come here and be part of us. Amin:)

Here are us. 83 of us with some of our lecturers. It has been great, super great!

>>p/s: will only have 2 days for raya, but then again to be great we need to sacrifice<<

Friday, 13 July 2012

Hiatus has I been. To the world full of torture. Even though, this is just a mere beginning of a new start. Ya Rabb, I pray. Please don't make me weak. Give me strength. To overcome all these insecure feelings. What ever happened, please let my heart soften to accept it. I don't want to be as rebellious as before. Blaming my fate till I cried out blood. No! I don't want to return to that pathetic state.

While I am here, Allah has certainly poured me with so much love and care. Because, without HIM, without His permission to let me be here, I won't find those friends who keep reminding me to solah, to zikr, to remember him mostly. Maybe, I would be in that snobby state, where I would cry if I don't get something I want.

Indeed, for the pro exam. I like many others, do have that intention, that wish, to get distinction. To get excellent results. But for now, things have made me realized there are more than just getting distinction, and excellent results. When you are older, you will be happy if you be more realistic towards your goal. When you know where you stand, you can definitely toned down the fright.

I do respect some of my friends here that are very patient all along these torture 3 weeks, study almost non stop so that they would get what they want. And along these three weeks, many asked me whether I have completed my revision and up till now, I literally didn't even get to recap what I read and reviewed. To be frank, I am a person who is very bad in revision and examination. What have brought me here is rahmat from ALLAH Taala.

Efforts are also useless if we are to boastful about them. Indeed, it's a no pain no gain when we talk about achievements. Name any achievements, no body has achieved theirs without slightest pain. But, remember, only Allah Himself could make your efforts worth and completely of zero meaning. Don't be boastful as boastfulness are not for humans instead, it's for Allah.

As for knowledge, share it with those around you. It's a very bad thing when the place you are studying at has this nonsense thought that we can't share certain things to the people that deserve the knowledge. It's feel very sad to not being to help those that have helped us in certain ways; just because you are tied up with the policy. Perhaps, I would be banned again this time, but I think I am doing the right thing.

Not to mention, starting from next week; it would be a closure to the title I held for all this past 10 months. Being a leader is not a tough job for such a small scale of students. Alhamdulillah, Allah has certainly help me through all those heart wrecking moments, those quarrels with other students and other complications. Now, things are back to normal. People are more interested to study rather than some batch fights. So, yeah, it has been a great opportunity to be a leader, even though I know I am not a good one. These people deserve better person as a leader: and I think we already have one. Alhamdulillah that a new Vice President is the one that can hold responsibility and well-versed in Islam. I must learn from her, many things to be learnt.

17th July; the first paper will I sit for. And everything will be a history by the noon of 23rd July. I hope people who stumble or by chance read this, can pray for this weak person. Pray for my strength. I really need to pass first year with flying colours. I want to return to home town with a smile and not with a frown.