i like this! an interesting subject to write about. 'spotted black/spotted white/spotted nothing but chewing grass' is great - i dont know if u meant it, but the wording is very clever. good work!

sir archbald sinclair chapter 1 . 2/4/2006

wonderful. Wonderful. wonderful. A very dynamic, very descriptive, intense poem with a brilliant zoom out - zoom in effect. I also interpreted a deeper meaning of the indecisive inferior roles in relationships being reflected in the role of the pillion rider. But as this is not present in your relationship (assuming that is what you based it on)Maybe it isn't there, You and mr harekrishnan are remarkably communist, i will have to shoot you. Again your exquisite sense of perosnality allows us to realise that this is your thoughts. A brilliant poem, as good as yours get. But please, for gods sake, can your next poem not have a mysteriouos male figure emminently reflecting someone we both know. It's effective but i swear your obbsessed. (a decent obsessio. A good poem