Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Monday, January 29, 2007

The View Today...

The View today was on Autism, I have to say it broke my heart when Toni Braxton broke down in the beginning, when talking about her son who was recently diagnosed w/ autism.

I have to say it's one of my biggest fears, and for the longest time I would obsess and watch Nolan's every move... I am a bit more relaxed about it now, but now w/ seeing on the show that some kids can develop it at any point before their 2nd birthday, well, the relaxed feeling I had about it is pretty much gone. He's 19 months old today, so we are closing the gap, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't worry about it still.

Speaking of Nolan, we are about to give him a tad more freedom at home, he's always wanting to be in the kitchen, so we childproofed the cabinets and drawers. I'm excited to see the look on his face when he realizes that he can't get to the cheese grater or the can opener, lol. mean mommy.

I'm such a fucking ray of sunshine lately... have I mentioned how much I hate Aaron's new work schedule? I have, oh well too bad. Let the complaining commence. I feel like I'm alone all the time, I feel like a single fucking parent. Though when he's home in the morning, he is a huge help... it's not that at all. I was just so used to the other schedule, it was a lot easier. The evenings sucketh hard and by the time Aaron gets home at night I'm exhausted, bitter and DONE. I am trying new things to fix the problem areas, it's just not easy. I realize that this is my problem, and I need to figure out how to deal with it, I'm just struggling. I feel overwhelmed w/ the housework and the childcare on my plate... and the balance that I'm trying to create, but it's just not coming very easy.

In other news, I wore the wrong shoes to the gym yesterday (athletic looking, but probably not truly appropriate for the gym) and as a result now have angry looking blisters underneath each big toe. I was going to go the gym today and swim instead, but then I remembered that would entail getting my fat ass into a bathing suit, and yeah... not so much in the mood. So I did a workout video and just breathed through the pain.

No real plans for the weekend yet. I hope to make it to Church on Sunday (need to get seth baptized!) other than that probably just going over to my parents. In that end, here are some pics...

Sethy all decked out for the last seahawk playoff game (a few weeks ago) not that it helped, the bastards still lost.

Monday, January 22, 2007

*yawn*

It's 9:31 already... man time flies. Have I mentioned that Aaron is working nights right now? well, swing shift I guess. Have I mentioned that I MOTHERFUCKING HATE IT? Well I do. A lot. it's a lot of work in the evening to fly solo here, and man do I miss his help. I also don't handle transition very well, so it's been a test of my sanity in getting from pre-jammies to bath to jammies to bed. That's a lot of transition in about a 2.5 hour time frame. And it sucketh. Hard.

Seth is so different from nolan, I know that should be a no brainer, but it's not. I am constantly puzzled with how to deal with him at bedtime... Nolan always nursed down and used a binky for soothing during the night. Sethy... not so much. Not nursed down, so we started sleep training a few weeks ago... which for the most part is not a problem. the first few weeks actually went really well; we put him down awake and at first he fussed, but it wasn't too bad. He's still swaddled, as I just don't think he's quite ready to lose it yet. Though I have been loosening it a little bit this week in preperation for it to be taken away in the next month or so.

the problem lately is that he will either vehemently protest bedtime (not naptime mind you, just bedtime) to the point where I end up getting him back up ... which in essence defeats the purpose of letting him fuss at all. I just don't want him to be hysterical. He also has a charming new habit of the last few nights of falling asleep and then waking up 1-2 hours later... very unlike him. And very irritating and makes me EVEN more scared for when we put the boys in a room together. That will be happening in a few short months and to put it mildly... I am skeered.

Anyone ever watch supernanny and have a hard time feeling anything but rage toward the kids? the one last night was about toddlers, and I didn't have quite the same rage, though I felt damn overwhelmed for those parents. But in the past few episodes, the children have been older and complete assholes. There was one where the mom hit them a lot and to be honest, damn I can't blame her. Just watching the show I had ZERO empathy towards the kids. that can't be good.

Lastly, tonight when I was changing nolan's diaper he reached down, grabbed his junk and said "PEE PEE". ahh, the pride. lol.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

And then there were two...

we had to put Molly to sleep today. And no, I really don't want to talk about it.

that said, here are some pictures of the boys... (they are pretty old, from mid december)

in his cute seahawks outfit... that he will NEVER wear again because the pants are slippery. And he may or may not have fussed himself right off the couch after this picture was taken... giving his mama the closest thing to a damn heart attack she's ever had. So yeah. the outfit has been retired.

Though he was a happy boy before he hit the carpet.

mama's little chick magnet

Oh crimony, there she is with the camera again.

wassup?

tummy time

He's tickled just to be allowed at the computer with daddy

His mama cracks him up

mmm waffles. (notice how he's speared some egg on the wrong end of the fork, lol)