United States

Just off the southern coast of Long Island, New York, a summertime haven exists for all those looking to escape reality and to find themselves on the beach with the city lost long behind them.
Widely unknown outside of New York, Fire Island attracts a diverse crowd of people: from children and

I awake to the sound of Nene loudly squawking - music to my ears.
Crawling out of my tent, I see smoke rising from the nearby cabin for which my anonymous hiker friends paid $75. What a joke.
Going back to sleep is an attractive an option at this point, but I decide to get moving before the

My night spent sleeping on the porch of the Kaupo General Store was reminiscent of my sleepless nights on the Pacific Crest Trail.
Fortunately it has not rained, and the morning sky looks promisingly blue. I pack my things and get moving. I follow a road for an uncomfortable amount of time

The objective? Get to the summit of Haleakala (10,000 ft / 3,048 m) from sea level.
My journey begins some 63 mi / 101 km from the trailhead in Kaupo (located on the far east side of Maui), and I estimate it will take me two days to get there on foot. I think I will try my luck at

I often wonder at what age it becomes inappropriate for a person to be naked in a public forum.
This of course leads to wondering why I failed to take more advantage of this very special time in my own life. Oftentimes the urge to get into my birthday suit overpowers my rationality and I find

Since no cars are permitted on Fire Island during the summer months, your only (reasonable) option for getting to the island is to use the Fire Island ferries (or have a (friend with a) boat).
There are two companies who operate ferries between Long Island and Fire Island: the Sayville Ferry

People come to Fire Island to do two things: to escape the horrors of Long Island, and to get drunk off their asses and make fools of themselves.
Now these two groups are not mutually exclusive, but it's those from the latter who interest us today.
Most of the steroid pumping misogynistic

When living on an island your resources are limited: fresh water, toilet paper, friends, and of course food.
Luckily, for the people of Fire Island there appears to be a thriving eel and crab population in the Great South Bay, making for easy prey and interesting snacks.
Oddly enough you will

Before I came out to this wonderland known as Fire Island I knew very little about it, and all that anyone had to say about the island was that it was a "gay island" composed entirely of speedo sporting, ab chiseling, rainbow farting men who came here to engage in activities deemed inappropriate for