election

Read the label closely on this bottled up thread of booze-minded, politically-fueled goodness: many of these games are guaranteed to give your tolerance for the alcohol a solid run, all the while pulverizing your liver. And hey, maybe that's exactly what some of us find ourselves hopelessly looking for as we stare out at the abyss of what some might call the 'death of the American Dream', while others see hope and promise. I don't know. Let's hoist a glass either way and enjoy the circus.

Part of me right now is harboring the gut kind of instinct that the Donald had to have knowingly stirred the pot of chaos on this one. I mean dude, not only is this the wrong Ivanka, but she's evidently an outspoken environmentalist. See for yourself with the tweet she decided to respond back with after DJ Trump's original botched attempt to touch base with the wifey on Twitter:

The internet has come up with a brand new meme in light of footage of Donald Trump craning his neck over the voting booths to check his wife Melania's ballot. Possibly because everyone has a lot of time on their hands while they wait in insanely long voting lines.

Facebook, a never-ending source of useful information, has been our goto for up-to-the-minute election coverage this past season. As such, it’s probably caused us more anxiety about this election than any one speech, Wikileaks email, or video featuring Billy Bush. Your Facebook wall feeds into your worst fears about the candidates, and Stephen Colbert knows it.

On The Late Show with Stephen Colbert last night, Colbert took a big swig of cough syrup, dusted off his box of Reynolds wrap, and made a new tinfoil hat to block the radio signals that the Illuminati uses to read our minds. Colbert is full of great intel about such things as the whereabouts of Chumbawumba, the shadowy industry of upstate New York weddings, and what oysters actually are. By the end of it, you’ll have your cork board up and long strands of yarn connecting seemingly disparate items together to prove your theory that, hey, what if the Chicken McNugget is more nugget than chicken?