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People Are Sharing The Weirdest Things Their Kids Have Said And It’s Creepy As Hell

Twitter users share their creepiest kid stories.

Children can be cute. Children can be precious. Children can say some really, really creepy shit, and make you wonder if they’re maybe secretly a demon sent to haunt you for all eternity. No, seriously — there’s a Twitter thread exploding right now that details some weirdly cryptic stuff kids have said. Read on, and brace yourself. You should probably (definitely) sleep with one eye open from now on.

Last week, writer Mikki Kendall put out a Twitter call for some creepy, real-life quotes from children. And, oh boy, did people deliver. There are more than 1,000 stories and counting — each one more hilariously, terrifyingly bizarre than the next.

People who interact with kids, what is the single weirdest/creepiest thing a kid has ever said to you? It's Saturday night so why not creep yourself out? pic.twitter.com/6pK92nOkmG

First of all, there appears to be a lot of evidence that children are both psychic and have lived multiple lives.

I was was watching a prek class while the teacher was out and this little girl walked up to my belly pointed and said "There's a little tiny baby in there. There's a little baby right there." I was pregnant but hadn't told my job.

Back in the day my younger brother used to tell us about his “other” grandparents, and the blue house they used to live in. After always telling him he was making it up he told our mother he could bring her there. So, we went for a drive...

Like, there are some kids who will love you so much that they might try to kidnap you forever and/or make a replica of you without your organs. Because, natch.

It’s not as creepy as the rest of these, but I was babysitting for my mom’s coworker (6-7). He was playing some video game when he got up and somehow locked us in the basement. Standing in front of the door he slowly turned to me and said “now you’re stuck with us” pic.twitter.com/dr5LND3RRD

He was an only child so I was confused as to who tf “us” was. I called his mom to say we’re locked in the basement and she goes “I told him not to do that. He likes to keep everyone he likes down there” pic.twitter.com/yFKRjx5Faj

Other stories include a child who was in a coma and now, whenever it rains, she says that she smells God. “So if you ever wondered what God smells like, you’re welcome,” her mom quipped. “Makes you wonder where she spent those three days.”

There was also a kid who literally TUCKED HER BONE back into her skin after she broke her arm, grabbed her bike, and headed back home.

It is becoming abundantly clear that some children have weird supernatural powers, and we all have to accept this as fact and try to live our lives the best we can. Preferably with some garlic and holy water at our sides at all times.

Now, go hug your creepy child tight — while quietly praying that they don’t attempt to perform some sort of weird ghost ritual on you in your sleep.