Sunday, July 8, 2012

Reader Contribution: Kiwi-Speak, from Ali

Byter Ali sent me an item “How to Speak New
Zealander”.

For the benefit of overseas
readers, the Australian and New Zealand accents are not the same, just as
Canadian accents are different from American accents.Like Canadians, who don’t like it when they
are mistaken for Americans, New Zealanders (usually referred to as Kiwis, after
their national emblem, not the fruit) get upset when mistaken for Australians.It is also common for Australians to tell
Kiwi jokes. Some examples:

Q:Why wasn’t Jesus born in New Zealand?

A: Because they couldn’t find three wise men and
a virgin.

Have you heard that the New Zealanders
have discovered two new uses for sheep?Meat and wool.(This is a common
topic, that New Zealand males, especially those on the land, have an attraction
to sheep).

As a quick guide to Kiwispeak:

·New
Zealanders pronounce words with the “i” sound, as in “in”, as a “u” sound, as
in “un”.Thus “pin” is pronounced” “pun”,
“fish and chips” becomes “fush and chups” and a cutting is a baby cat.

·Words
that have an “e” or “a” sound, as in “pen”, are pronounced with an “i” sound, as
in “pin”.Hence “ten” becomes “tin” and
a New Zealander who hears the word “lift” thinks not of an elevator but of the
opposite of “right”.

There are other changes as well, as will be apperent frum the thungs nixt:

Here is Ali’s item:

A further item to assist those who might
be travelling, or thinking of travelling to New Zealand in the future: