A crumbling metropolis spread over two countries, actually El Paso/Juarez, with some of the finest women and hottest food in the country. Lots of strip joints, low violent crime rate, very cheap weed, and one angry fucking cracker named Scott Durbin who's tired of motherfuckers talking shit about his home. Lick my asscrack, which is probably all full of sand and cactus cause I'm in El Paso. Die.

If you don't wanna be here, please fucking leave, we don't want you, and we're tired of hearing your bitching.

We, the people of El Paso. El Paso is what we make it. Don't give people a reason to trash talk our city by being only the best you can be. Ask not what El Paso can do for you, but what you can do for El Paso. Stop being selfish and greedy and think about what legacy you shall leave for your grand city. You can be a traitor or a patriot. The choice is simple if you ask me.

Take pride in where you were born even if it's not perfect. Have enough pride to correct its flaws. Stop littering, stop throwing gum on the sidewalk, let people over on the freeway, stop smoking, and stop getting drunk every weekend and do something to make our city whole again.

It doesn't matter if El Paso's problems are "not your fault". It is your responsibility as a human being to leave the world a better place than you found it. Otherwise, you're nothing but a parasite. You people make me sick. What will you tell your children? That you run from the world's problems rather than confront them? You are not a patriot...you're a coward.

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Yeah, the Juarenos & constant reminder of Mexico is a bit overwhelming at times. Plus the 100+ temperatures in the summer time is unlike no other but overall that's what makes El Paso, El Paso.
El Paso was established around 1680, thats right ladies, it's one of oldest cities in Texas. Older than San Antonio, Austin, Dallas, & Houston. It is THE Safest City in the country & Ft. Bliss is one of the largest Army complex in the nation. The 1st thanksgiving in America actually happened in San Elizario & has been the central place of Pancho Villa & Billy the Kid.
Also, education wise the United States House Committee on Intelligence is chaired by Silvestre Reyes, the House representative of El Paso. The newly elected Governor of New Mexico Susana Martinez was born & raised in El Paso. UTEP has alumni in the NBA, PGA, PBA, WWF, on SNL, ABC, an Academy Award winner & Olympic Gold Medalist.
As far as all the other people what keep talking about music Vanity Fair had a special on how the Yeah, Yeah, Yeah's, Sleepercar and tons of other recording artists just love El Paso.

FOOD! Yes, El Paso isn't the healthiest cities in America but if you want some tamales, enchiladas or any Mexican food, El Paso blows everyone else out of the water but not only that, we got Smash Burger, Five Guys, Whataburger, Charbroiler, Buffalo Wild Wings, Chico's & a restaurant-to-house ratio of 1:1. Yes, as El Pasoans we love our food.
Lastly to all the people who decided to bash El Paso over the head, yes, I'm a native El Pasoan & I'm proud to say it. I've lived in Washington D.C., I've traveled to Madrid, Paris, London, NY & LA & somehow El Paso is still home. It's the culture & the people, yeah we don't have Palm Tree lined streets & a monument that anybody in the world can recognize but you know what I like it that way. Thats why we're in the Top 25 Drunkest cities in America, but thats besides the fact.

So, if you have a problem with El Paso, just leave because your honestly ruining it for all of us. Go to your humid & dirty San Antonio & just decompose there.

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

A sprawling stain of concrete, dirt, liqour stores, and angry people who yell at you in a language you can't even understand. The entire city is covered in a reddish-gray haze between the hours of 5 to 8 PM. (then it gets dark). The only place in america with an amusement park right next to giant, polluting oil refineries that spew toxic water into the drinking water of millions of mexicans who actually drink out of the Rio Grande.

Go there and you'll understand why the Mars Volta writes such fucked-up music.