Friday, May 21, 2010

Today, I realized that I am no robot. The stress brought up by my personal problems, and somewhat lack of sleep and rest has already taken its toll. I broke down and feel so tired.

Around five o'clock this morning while in front of my laptop, I suddenly felt a sting pain on my chest while breathing. It's alarming that I cannot breathe a full air anymore. I ran to the pantry to drink water thinking that it would ease the pain, but it only made it worse.

I sat in front of the sink as I saw my officemate with blur sight. I thought I'm dying. I shed tear.

As minutes passed by, I can slowly feel relief in breathing. Sinus tach is the culprit as this has already happened to me last year. It's the fast palpitation of the heart as a result of exercise, excessive stress, anxiety and fatigue. But the chest pain, the weakening of my body and the abnormal breathing is not a good sign.

I know this is already the repercussions of taking too much of these anxieties and problems which is building up inside me which I need to take a rest and slow down a bit.

Yes, I am dead serious with the title. So in these next few days, I'll give my full support on her because she's my top priority like a wife giving birth to our first son. As you can see the time listed, I'll be round-the-clock beside her. :)

Yet, when already involved in a relationship, madami din kailangang tandaan para maging matibay ang inyong pagsasama. I want to share three pointers here that think might help you in building a stronger relationship.

Learn to say sorry and forgive. If you know that you hurt the feelings of your partner, say sorry immediately. Iwasang patagalin ang mga misunderstandings kasi the more na pinatagal mo ito ay mas lalo itong magiging complicated at baka mas mahirapan kayong solusyonan ang problema. On the other hand, learn how to forgive. If your partner asked for forgiveness, give in. You will know if he/she is sincere when they say sorry. Ibaba ang pride kasi walang nagagawa ang pride, mas lalo lang magkakaroon ng gap between the two of you kung mahirap kang magpatawad.

Tell them or show them how much you love them before it's too late. I was not a "showy" person before. Naiirita ako sa unang girlfriend ko noon kasi lagi nyang sinasabi kung gaano nya ako kamahal. Hindi ako sweet na tao kaya ayoko ng mga ganun. Until we found out that she has leukemia. That was the turning point for me, I realized nagkamali ako. I had only very little time to show and tell her how much I love her. Nagsisisi ako kung bakit hinayaan kong palampasin ang napakadaming pagkakataon na sabihin sa kanya. Kaya nung sumunod kong relasyon ay lagi ko ng sinasabi kung gaano ko sila kamahal.

I hope that someday she's going to read this post. I want her to know how much I love her and I'm willing to do everything to make our relationship go stronger. I know she's mad at me now that's why I am asking for forgiveness. I hope that she's still willing to fix the problem I made and I am begging her if we can sit and talk about this one.

I have plans on us already. I want to build a family with her, a home where we can stay forever. I want to be beside her until my last breathe.

If you're going to read this, please accept my apologies and let's start anew. I love you very much; you're the one who taught me how to love again after being broken. I don't want to lose you and I hope you still do.