My Favorite Things: #5 Paper Towel Dispensers

One of my life mantras is “The More The Better.” Why would I want to dry my hands with one large paper towel when I could use like five or six miniature towels at a time. Plus, silver lining, I’m getting tons of extra exercise while I’m pumping this slot machine arm for 3 inches of paper at a time.

In 1999 I proudly walked in the “Million Man March Against the Hand-Crank Towel Dispensers.” It was time they made those things electric! I remember the outcry from the media against the hand-cranked machines, due to the years of oppression we were subjected to living under. Being forced to use brute human strength to crank those archaic machines for a towel, simply to dry our freshly cleansed hands.

I only wish the new electric sensors didn’t work all the time. Seems like it would be fun to stand there waving my arms around like an idiot, hoping a tiny piece of paper might possibly come out.