Day 209 of 365

I was 15 when I was sexually assaulted by my best friend's brother, he was 22. He drugged me, drove me somewhere and had his way with me for hours, I was in and out of consciousness the entire time, the last thing he said to me and my mother was that he took me out for ice cream at his sister’s house. He took my virginity, he took my soul and he took my entire being. I have never seen him since that night, but if I could I would kill him. I was just a child and he took advantage of that. I soon found out later I was pregnant, it was a boy a healthy bouncing baby boy, but he looked just like my attacker. It threw me into such a deep depression every time I remembered what happened to me. I tried to hang myself and was sent to a mental institution for three months.

I was diagnosed with PTSD and I had suicidal tendencies still do actually, because of this I am deemed mentally unstable and unfit for my son therefore my parents adopted him I now call him my brother. My attacker took literally everything from me and it hurts so badly. Three years pass and I'm turning 19 soon I look back on what happened to me, it still hurts me, but I'm getting past it. Hopefully one day I will never feel this dirty, empty or violated every again. Life goes on, scars don't.