I wrote a status update on gmail looking like this: “I hate Daniel. I hate Maria, Maxigas, Vlanto, Hajni, Emma, Ida, Petya, the “feminist” group in Budapest. I hate Micke, Aleksi, Antti, Stacy, Kassu. I hate Taru. I hate a whole bunch of people. I hate the whole “leftist” scene. Posers and fakers and rotten selfish non-reflective assholes.”

Soon after Bela contacted me over chat, asking:

The rest of the chat:

me: i don’t think it’s fun. i do have problems with your behavior. and i haven’t added you as a friend on facebook since i know you’ve had really dominant behaviors towards women.

glosz.bela: It’s right. What can I do with it than?

Should I suppress it?

me: when i get access to facebook i can add you, and we can have a discussion about this on your wall.that’s my suggestion.

glosz.bela: Would it elliminate my bad feeling about women or it will enhance those feelings?

.

Added in my status update: “Bela wanted to be added on the “hate list”, and I don’t see why not. So here it is: Bela, I hate you too. You need to deal with your sexist dominant abusive behaviors. I think you fit into the same category as Daniel – you’..” [That was the limit of letters fitting the ‘status’ box..]

.

glosz.bela: Ok, what’s next?

me: like i said. when i get access to facebook i can add you as a friend and you or i can start a discussion about this on either my wall or yours.

im not interested in having private talks with people about these matters.

glosz.bela: Ok. I will admit I’m an evil in front of others without any cynical attitude, because these feelengs are really inside me. But how will those feelengs evaporate?

Small facts about Bela: She opened her flat to women with small children. Soon after she got involved intimately with some of these women, trying to promote “free love” in the group. Some of the men in the group were very aggressive in this — Telling women that they weren’t fair if they didn’t share physical intimacy equally between the men. There were sectish rules added to the flat — The toilet door was removed. One woman was asked to take her clothes off, and when she didn’t want to she was told to leave. The men talked of being “sexually oppressed” by the women, saying that the women had “sexual power” over them. They have also been talking of children, and that children should have sex with one another.

Bela has also sexually abused one woman, and told several different stories of what occured. To me she said that the woman said a verbal “no”, but that Bela chose to ignore it because the body of the woman “said yes”, putting the responsibility on the woman sleeping in the same bed, and saying that she as a man had no control over the situation, just following her physical instincts. As far as I know Bela has not recognized this as sexist or harmful behavior.