Some things are worth noticing, but aren't worth writing down. They just aren't that important or useful. This is about the other things.

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Life School: Stranger-angels

Above, shown in squint-producinglettering (sorry) is a very true thing that I wish I'd said, but which I won't forget.

Some people read something like that Maya Angelou quote and pin it where they'll remember it. Some consider such a tender truth banal, and don't take it seriously. Some applaud such truths publicly but don't really practice them in their own lives.

I'll cover that third one in Pet Peeves #3, which is scheduled to appear as soon as I must deal with another government agency, or Comcast.

Exchanges between people, all kinds, fascinate me almost more than anything, but none more than those between an intuitive stranger and another in need.I can't remember if I fed Gus this morning (that's not really true. I think I did), but like it was yesterday, I remember walking into a psychology
stat course where my professor was talking to a student. The student, about
nineteen, looked exhausted and near tears. The professor, a doctor with a very intense gaze, looked into the boy's
face with an expression of caring I'd never seen before.

"How you doing?" he asked."Okay?"

The boy nodded, "Yeah, better."

The tenderness of this simple question was perfect, and its effect was obvious. I never forgot it.And it was me once, in need, sitting on a train after a serious writing setback had me thinking I wasn't meant to be in the writing business at all. I still remember the facial expression of a stranger who passed me while I was deep in thought over plan B which was: I don't know what to do now. She was several years older than I, and she fixed me with a long expression of such knowing it halted my thoughts mid-spiral. As clear as water, it just said, You're supposed to be here. It's part of it.I still think of it. Last week, a cashier at our supermarket held the line
up for so long helping a very elderly lady locate her ATM card in her giant bag-of-everything that everyone gave up and went elsewhere. I stayed.

"That's the one!" the cashier said to her,
"That's right, just swipe it right there.""Here?" she asked."That's right. You're all set,
now."

She didn't know the buttons to push and he came around
to show her. She looked at me, and I smiled. Finally, after several
apologies, she was on her way. So visibly relieved was the woman, I wondered how often she encountered the tired tone, the show of patience, the sigh of inconvenience that so many busy people use with others who don't move fast enough to please them. I'll RE-cover that in Pet Peeves #3, which is scheduled to appear as soon as I must deal with any kind of insurance issue, or hold music, or both.When it was my turn, I thanked the cashier for his patience."It's easier for me to be patient than it was for
her to get that done with people staring at her," he said. "Also I am a youth counselor with teenagers. You can deal with anyone after that."He smiled at that, the thought of those kids. Those lucky kids.