homeschool, block schedules + patience

January 15, 2015 by ashley @ the handmade home

I realized the other day that I haven’t shared many posts on homeschool this school year, because it kind of feels like we’ve been keeping our head above the water, just trying to figure it all out. Then again, no one ever said it was going to be easy.

We’re convicted. We take the plunge. We invest in the curriculum. And then, here we are. It gets hard. It gets downright discouraging, trying to problem solve as a family.

We wrote about a rocky start in September and a little encouragement when you’re in the trenches. For us personally this year, we believe it was moving up a grade for one child, and just trying to work from home while doing this. The transition of the dynamics in a new year… maybe a combo of all the components coming together to make it a little more challenging. The bottom line is that at some point, it became really difficult.

We’ve wanted to throw in the towel, and it’s intimidating. So I’m writing from an in-the-trenches perspective, and we’re sharing because we know we’re not alone. We’re answering a few or your awesome questions today {both in our post and in the questions section if you have any topics you’d like to discuss}! Without further ado, a little on homeschool, block schedules + patience.

1. Patience

Annie wrote us recently and asked: …I really loved your post on encouragement in homeschooling for when it gets hard. I was wondering what you feel your greatest struggle is as a mom who home schools? I’d love to hear your perspective now that you have been doing it for a while…

Patience. By far.

I’ve been selfish lately. I want to lose it, scream, stomp my foot, run off through the bushes {as my grandmother would say} and not come back. But let’s face it… starbucks is probably the only place where I would actually try to hide it out, and it would get kind of old after a few hours of henpecking on my laptop a-la the glory days of college. {Let’s all have a moment of silence for the fact that we can never go back.} Starbucks would eventually close, and the cops would probably start looking for our minivan, only to find me camped out in the parking lot still trying to use their wifi…and sipping on the final remnants from my third grande white chocolate mocha high. I’m kinda lame. So no running off through the bushes for me. It’s just that sometimes, I would like to have a conversation without raising my voice to be heard over all. the. other. voices. I’d very much enjoy a regular break. And I’d also very much enjoy Tahiti. Yes, a cruise to Tahiti sounds quite tempting. Do I sound like a terrible ingrate yet? More like completely honest? Because I think it’s perfectly normal to feel this way. It’s easy to lose my patience when things don’t meet my expectations.

Homeschooling is a lifestyle change, and I think that sometimes I forget that.

For us personally, what we’re dealing with right now in our little students is an attitude issue. This means school can be a time suck. This means that it’s easy to lose my patience because of stress and trying to figure it all out.

Homeschool has a way of revealing the very raw edges of parenting and childhood and all the things that we really need to work on, in a convicting way that will bring you to your knees. Constantly.

But we’ve found that a little patience goes a long way.

I find myself saying… I didn’t sign up for this! And then I realize maybe I just need a little more patience. I’m being a little short sighted and not remembering our long term goals and vision for our family. When I take a deep breath, and I’m willing to use that little hard-to-come-by-virtue in a consistent way, {see me trying to write this while children scream over legos and the puppies bark} …things get a little easier over time.

2. The block schedule.

Lindy wrote: …I know you said you are using Sonlight again this year. We purchased it and are completely overwhelmed with more than one child. I was wondering how do you do it all with the reading? It feels like it’s never ending. We’re kind of frustrated this year, because it’s so overwhelming. We would love any input you can give…

Give yourself room to breathe.

Professional teachers hit road blocks all the time, and have to reevaluate to find a solution. It’s easy to get down on yourself, and forget that bottom line: your gut is there for a reason as a parent.

Sometimes, it’s simply time to find a different approach for your child’s learning style. Just because the curriculum has it laid out a certain way, doesn’t mean it’s the best approach for your child. Or you, as their teacher.

One of the biggest things that has helped me, is using our Sonlight curriculum as a resource. If you’re using a heavy curriculum and not giving yourself the freedom to call the shots, you’re probably doing yourself a disservice… especially if you’re working with more than one child. And if you’re anything like me, you’re probably feeling a little frustrated. And that frustration can trickle down to your children. We know this, first hand.

I got a little caught up in all of the subjects and all of the options and all of the reading, and then realized that there was a great way to simplify this. This was in two steps: 1. We whittled it down. 2. Then we went to a block schedule.

When I looked at the way we were spending our time each morning, half of it was transitioning in an out between all the subjects, and trying my best to corral children in between. I love the heavy options Sonlight provides as long as I don’t look at it as a must-do. Even they say not to use it as a check list.

We ended up whittling it down, and placing a heavy emphasis where we felt our children needed more guidance. Instead of a 4 day schedule where we felt like things were crammed with not enough time to explore subjects in a greater depth, we simplified.

What a block schedule looks like for us:

This will be different for everyone, but we now focus on M-TH with Math, Language arts, Spelling, Individual reading, and group reading. Each child’s assignment is fine tuned to their individual needs and levels.

We also realized in the middle of all of this, they needed more individual work. We wanted them to take initiative for their work, without so much one on one time with us. So in the afternoons, {when they finish in the mornings, they receive a two hour break} they spend time at three “stations” at thirty minute intervals. These include individual assignments like practicing their spelling words, reading, working on multiplication tables or whatever it is we feel they need that week. It hones in on their assignments they’re already working on, and helps insure they’re mastering it, independently. This has been a game changer for us.

On Fridays, we study all of our History and Science. This is their favorite day, because they are able to sit and read with us as a family, and we spend concentrated time on their favorite subjects.

We started this before thanksgiving, and just went hardcore with the individual study time last week. We’ve already seen vast improvements. All three have better attitudes, and actually enjoy it a little more. Again, different for everyone, but a little structure with our kiddos goes a long way.

We hope that helps a little in planning it all out! It can get a little tricky when they’re all on different grade levels and every little bit helps us. Pssst: this works with our 2015 free planner, and a few printables you can probably pull from 2014 for school, as well. Pick and choose and customize it as you like!

3. Reflection

Wendy wrote: It’s been a rocky start for us. We hit a snag and we’re trying to work through it. It doesn’t help when people say I should try something different, like put them in our local school. I don’t feel like that’s an option for our situation right now. I would just like to hear a fresh perspective. Any input would be so appreciated…

I ran across this quote recently, and it really helped. Sometimes, when you find yourself in between a rock and a hard place, it can be hard to keep a fresh perspective. It can be easy to get distracted and feel a little less than adequate.

If I could give any advice based on what we’ve struggled with personally, {and I keep going back to this} it would be don’t ever neglect to go with your gut. Try to remember why you started doing this, in the first place. Sometimes, it takes a while to fall into your groove as a family, and even then, it still changes. Give yourself that grace. Give yourself that time.

It’s hard not to freak out when you hit a snag. It’s hard not to give up when you’re having a bad month. {Or months} And it’s hard to stay with it when you feel like everyone around you is doing something different. It can be easy to feel a little bad, when you see homework, or a school play or something else on social media that makes you feel like you’re not adding up.

Self-doubt has a way of weaseling its way in and settling down for the long haul, like a bad splinter that needs to be removed. It can easily ruin a good thing, when it teams up with discouragement. Don’t let it. Question these sources and their legitimacy. It’s perfectly normal to feel this way, but where on earth is the pressure coming from? Don’t let it get the best of you.

{Because puppies make everything better}

Nothing worth fighting for ever comes easy. I think it’s healthy to reflect and ask yourself the hard questions. We say that every year will be an evolving, prayerful decision, based on our growing family. Every family is completely different, and what looks right for one, will not be right for another. What is best this year, may be different the next. Give yourself permission if it’s time, to tweak that vision for your kids. Maybe it’s changing, and so is your family. Maybe homeschool is no longer a good fit. Maybe it is, and it will just take a little time and patience to make it through a rough transition. There is no one size fits all.

We’ve found that consulting teachers, friends, websites, and fellow homeschool friends are also a good way to keep us in check. We’ve also stayed the course long enough now to know that this is worth it. We all come with our own struggles and quirks… and sometimes it’s good for input from those who love and support you.

Just stay open to the possibilities because you’re their parent. At the end of the day, and after stepping back to look at all the possibilities, you know what the best decision is.

__________

We hope this helps a little with some of the questions! We’re thinking about you guys – just know you’re not alone in this little journey.

If you have any more questions, we’d love to hear from you below, and chances are, there are some savvy readers out there who can certainly answer better than we can! Please fire away ;}

Comments

May I suggest that you find appropriate sized seating and desks for your classroom? Putting little children in oversized chairs and tables is not best for them. Yes, it’s cute and quaint, but you are the teacher and should consider their needs first. As a former teacher I can say from experience that classroom environment is very important. Also, never let them see your frustrations. Children are very good at sensing your weaknesses. Plan ahead and over plan to stay ahead and be firm with them. Loving but firm. You can accomplish great things in homeschooling and it sometimes is best to also coordinate with other homeschoolers to get that necessary break that you will need as a parent. It also might be a good idea to crate the dogs during class time, then use playing with the dogs as a reward. Just a suggestion.

Thanks so much, Pam! We actually don’t spend much time in those chairs – it was just for this post that we took a few photos. It is a good workspace for when they need it. Please don’t let these photos impress upon you anything of what our day looks like. We rotate all around the house with what works best for them. I can assure you their needs are first, or we wouldn’t have made the choice to homeschool in the situation we were in. We hope this post is encouraging to others, and that was the only intent. But I assure you we are far from perfect.

Great post! You are doing a fabulous job! Regarding chairs, frustration and dogs in a previous comment (I’m sure the teacher meant well.) You keep on doing what you’re doing! I LET my kids see my frustration–it gives me opportunities to show them that even grown ups can work on character and that God is never finished teaching us! It also gives me opportunities to apologize and ask forgiveness. Chairs? Who cares? We don’t use them most of the time either! We often do schoolwork on the floor, trampoline or the coffee table. As far as dogs go–they are part of your family and when they cuddle up to a kid while working on spelling, they can fill that sensory need and help the child focus better on learning–helps keep the figety-ness (Is that a word?) away! You are a great mom!

Lol … I’m getting too used to FB. I wanted to hit ‘like’ on that comment! 🙂 The thing about homeschooling is that it is constantly changing, and I see this as a huge benefit. (De-schooling can be helpful for folks coming into it from former classroom experience, too). Just when you find something that works and hit your groove, someone’s needs change, life throws a curve ball, etc. and back to the Lord on your knees you go! I think this is actually beautiful. Getting stuck in a rut isn’t good for anyone. It might be easy … but we weren’t ever promised ‘easy’. Homeschooling can be such a tool for refinement of our character! Keep encouraging, keep being encouraged, and enjoy those priceless moments of kids and books and darling nooks with cute chairs and piles of pups … and all the change that keeps our eyes focused on Him. Hugs! ~Amber, Daughter of the king, wife, homeschooling mom of 4 (former teacher).

Just wanted to offer that I am homeschooling and doing very well. My first grader is up to multiplying 9’s, reading, etc.. I think working in a beautiful, grown up environment is fantastic!! I enjoyed your dining room revamp. I like to think about how inspired I feel when I sit down in a library. Big chairs, table space, and grown up environment! We homeschool in the dining room but you can’t tell it after school. I also think homeschooling in a lovely environment helps moms feel happier. We all know this makes homeschool goes much smoother. So keep up the good work and remember Rome wasn’t built in a day 🙂

I just wanted to add my “two cents” regarding the dog comment. I don’t homeschool but my daughter’s pre-school has a full time therapy dog that they have had since he was adopted at 6mo old. He greets the kids as they arrive, does yoga with the students and has never been a distraction in any way shape or form. He is seen as just one of the students, as our dogs are part of our family as well. It was one of the many reasons I choose her school. Plus, learning to take care of animals is a great life skill.

Your space is gorgeous! How have I never seen this before? How inspiring for those kiddos! We homeschooled for five years and I get where you (and the other moms) are coming from! So good to know we are not on our own. Kudos to you guys for staying with something that’s hard bit so rewarding! 🙂

Thank you for your honest and encouraging post! We decided three years ago to pull our girls out of the local public school and start doing it ourselves. It has been an unbelievable challenge yet the most rewarding experience of my life. It tests me in ways that I could have never imagined, but the payoff has been remarkable. The girls are so much closer than they used to be. We avoid all of the conflict and drama that the school system inevitably stirs up. My husband and I get to choose what they learn, how they learn and when they learn. It is incredibly scary yet exhilarating all at the same time! Some days I’d rather just crawl back into bed. Other days are just so smooth that I wonder why we didn’t homeschool right from the start! You are doing a wonderful job!!! Keep listening to your heart and stay flexible. That was a tough one for me in the beginning. Don’t be afraid to admit when something isn’t working. And don’t expect that your children will never see you frustrated! Aren’t we responsible for teaching them how to gracefully handle their humanity? That would be impossible if you always presented a veneer of perfection. Children learn how to be graceful with their own mistakes and frustration by watching us gracefully handle our mistakes and frustration. (Obvs, you don’t want them to take your frustration as a sign that they are bad or not smart…figured that would go without saying) Take a deep breath and have faith in your choice and your gut. (and by the way, our dog is an integral part of our school day. nothing makes homeschool sweeter than quick kisses and snuggles with our fuzzy buddy throughout the day!)

I’m not a parent, but even so appreciated the content of this post. You’re openness about your struggles and focus on what works best for your family/children/environment is a great message to all of us to not focus on what somebody else is doing ‘better’ because that wouldn’t work for you.

Absolutely Nikki! I’ve eaten crow for most of my parenting life, and homeschool is just an enriched version of said crow. It’s SO different for everyone, and different things work for different people! ;}

I don’t have kids, or homeschool, but I wanted to let you know how much your puppies brightened my frustrating work day today! They are so cute. I can’t wait to see the havoc they wreak as they grow…ummm…I mean, the love and joy they will bring your home! 😉

January is always the difficult hump for us. Every year! Anyone else?
We’re homeschooling four kids now – although youngest is K5 so his isn’t too intense yet – our oldest is soon to be 15. Flexibility is just as important as some scheduling is (as all the homeschoolers out there know! Amen). And you hit on this too, Ashley. We re-evaluate each year: what’s working, what’s not, who’s working well with some aspects, who isn’t flourishing with the same. We use A Beka and seriously have adapted as need be. The more kids that were joining the heavier curriculum stage was the point that we went to video curric for the olders. And it was a lifesaver for me/us/all of our sanity! We still work with them one on one, they simply have a video classroom of their grade to watch and learn with and then still do all their own work. And now that our oldest is in high school we stopped the videos for her and pick and choose from different curriculums to cater a bit more to her developed interests, which is fun! …and not only move her along faster through general high school requirements, but it also allows us to start some college level classes with her sooner. But again, each child is unique as is each parent/homeschooler!! Yay for encouraging each other! — we need more of this.

I LOVE hearing all of these perspectives Kerry, especially those with a wide age range /and older children. Like you said, you have to do what you have to do and not be afraid to be flexible! LOVE it. Thank you for YOUR encouraging words!

Thanks for sharing truth here 🙂 I’m with you on losing it having to speak over all the voices! I wonder how/if anything is sinking in. I’m going to try block scheduling with our Sonlight curriculum too, and see if that helps. It is a little jarring for us to transition between such a list of subjects. Thanks again! Love everything about your blog!

Forgot to say . . . I love that you have the support you need. I lead our homeschool group and I sometimes see moms return to public school because homeschooling was too hard and they think they didn’t hear God correctly when He asked them to homeschool. Just because something is hard does not mean we are not in God’s will. He never said this decision would be easy–He just asked me to do it! When I do “go to that place,” (and most do!) I re-read a blog post I did awhile back about “Why I Homeschool.” Helps me every time!http://brendajohnston.blogspot.com/search/label/why%20we%20homeschool

I love your scheduling idea and think we will try it out. I have never done block scheduling but it sounds like a time saver for homeschooling multiple children… and the stations idea…that was an “a-ha” moment for me!!

I found your blog a few months ago, and love love it! I am a homeschooler from Australia, for 14 years now…plenty of ups and downs, but most of all ups, and we have one almost finished uni (college) and another half way through, and a third about to start. There are three more still to go…can I say it will always be about attitude, theirs and yours. The days are long, but the years are short xx

Thank you so much for this. I was reading Heartfelt Discipline two days ago and reminded that our children need direction and correction but they also need grace. “It is the kindness of the Lord that leads to repentance.” Romans 2:4
Make me think of Elyze Fitzpatric and Jessica Thomson’s lesson on Grace in Parenting: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hJ9uV8S2oo

I applaud you for how well you handle post that might be hard to digest. You’re a bigger person than I because I kind of wanted to reach through the screen and…well, you get it 😉 Anywho, love this post!

HI. I’ve only been homeschooling for a few months but I am LOVING the My Father’s World Curriculum. I have several friends who use it too. I looked at Sonlight but was a bit overwhelmed and for my family the MFW works great. My kids are 5,7, and 9. If you feel like switching out curriculum next year, check it out. And we are using Math U See for Math and all three of my kids are doing great in that- they love math DVD lessons. So far, my days as a homeschool mommy are so much easier and less stress than when they were in public school. No more backpacks and crammed parking lots and tears saying goodbye. I’m not saying it will always be easier, but so far it has been a blessing. Keep your chin up!

Thank you for that Leslie. Your kids are the same ages as ours and I love hearing from your perspective. ;} We have heard about my father’s world over and over and over again. I think we will be looking into it for sure.

Thank you so much for sharing your life! It’s very inspiring. We are considering homeschooling and I’m curious, where do you start?! My mind is going in all different directions so any advice would be helpful.

Hey Sara! Awesome! I love it. I would recommend checking out this book – it really held my hand through it all, and helped me remember I’m completely sane and normal. ;} It breaks down the process, gives sage advice for curriculum and just seems like a really honest down to earth approach to me. ;} I would also watch this video for an interesting perspective, and this one for one from a kid. I also made a little list of things to consider that you may find helpful here and our entire series here because you’re not alone. ;} Thinking of you… please let me know if I can help with anything else or answer any more questions!