From the Desk of Murray Lincoln

Monday, November 28, 2016

When
my mom Marion moved to Peterborough in March 2007, we had a perfect plan. And
better than that I was fulfilling a promise I had made to my father that I
would look after mom after he left us.
That promise was way back in 1986.

In
December 2006 my mom’s Doctor in Regina, Saskatchewan had called me to give the
news that she needed to be in an “assisted living” arrangement of some
kind. Without us knowing the Doctor had
seen something that we knew nothing about, but he would not say more on the
telephone other than he was adamant she needed a new living arrangement.

The
move took place. Mom loved it and hated
it at the same time. Now she was 1700 miles from her nearest relative in their
very close family. Her reactions to what
I did and said were odd. Mom had never
talked to me that way before. I seemed to become the focus of her vile
anger. Shocking to say the least, Mom
had never been that kind of person.
Other times my mom was happy and so thrilled to be living with us. She
loved it! I was confused.

We
had her room all fixed up and ready for her when she arrived. All her needs were taken care of as far as I
could see. To top it off my wife as a
former RN stepped in to help wherever she was needed.

The
story is too long to tell here… but as time passed mom grew more and more dependent
on us for her care. Eventually she
couldn’t bath herself or do the normal personal care as to the toilet etc.

She
had passed the 90 year mark – and we had passed into the “severe stage” of
living where we were now “Mom-Centric”.

Every
waking moment and in fact every sleeping moment was filled with Mom. It was not uncommon to have a loud banging on
our door at 3 am… or have loud thud from her bedroom as she fell time and
again.

I had
promised my dad that I would look after mom – but this was crazy and even
crazier the next day. We had never felt
more alone at any time in our lives. Surrounded by friends and yet alone in our
nutsy world of care giving for a person that had something wrong that could
never be fixed!

My
wife and I were at a small meeting that was advertised as “someone doing a LHIN
survey for care of the elderly”. We sat
with some others around a table and each described what we were facing. One lady mentioned that she had been to the “GAIN
Clinic” to have an assessment done for her husband.

GAIN
Clinic – what was that!???

We
had no idea that community help was available for us… or what kind of community
help there might be. We were so involved
with just maintaining a semblance of sanity in a very bumpy and unbalanced life
that there was no time to look into anything.

We
did get an appointment at the GAIN Clinic.
While there they did an assessment on my mom. They also interviewed my
wife and me to see how we were doing. I
am sure now that what they saw, we couldn’t see or have any idea how bad things
were.

One
of the GAIN Clinic team members that day asked if we would be willing to attend
a group for people that were care givers.
That group idea was something to do with the Alzheimer Society.

We
had no idea that such a Group existed and that the one they suggested was only
a short distance from where we lived!!!

In
about a week’s time we met the most amazing young lady by the name of Denise –
the facilitator of the Alzheimer Society Support Group.

Our
entrance was slow and careful in that I had no idea who these folk were. I had
to be real careful with my “public image”.
The anger and frustration in me that had grown while trying to help my
mom had grown as my mom’s hidden disease had grown. If I said anything I would blow my top like a
volcano that was trembling from deep inside.

But
after a few meetings and listening to others, I couldn’t hold back anymore… I
exploded verbally, truthfully, irrationally, impossibly, angrily and in just
about every adjective that might describe a man out of control… and hating
every moment of the promise that he had made to his father years ago. This happened many times – but no one ever
condemned me or was shocked by what was said.

We
have been regular members of our Alzheimer Support Group for over three years
now. I have found peace.

With
Alzheimer Society we discovered help for us personally and information to
understand.

With
our community help we had discovered an Adult Day Program through the VON that
also offered their respite weekend care for mom.

Finally,
we had also discovered a wonderful long term care home for mom at Riverview Manor,
where the staff could not have been more kind and understanding.

My
mom passed away last November 2015.

We
were not alone. There was wonderful help for us… as there is for you if you are
a care giver.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Office OwlsListening to a close friend of mine as they described the turmoil that they face in their office each day prompted the creation of my "Office Owl".It seems that on any given day people walk in and present "Stupid" to her often. "Stupid" comes in things that they say without thinking. In ways that they act. In ways that they answer questions that are asked of them."Stupid" can make her day really bad. It can give her headaches and back aches.I should state here that if you react to "Stupid" in the wrong way - your position could be in jeopardy.Everyone one is surrounded by "Stupid" things all the time. And when I realized that, I designed the "Office Owl" to help with Stupid things and sometime people.When "Stupid" begins to appear you need only to pick up the Office Owl that sits on your desk and hold(or squeeze) him tightly... thus giving the Wise Office Owl the "Stupidity" in front of you.The Office Owl will help you in every way. As you squeeze him Wisdom will likely show up in a few moments to help you deal with Stupid. It is A WHOLE LOT BETTER THAN BITING YOUR TONGUE!Contact me at mistyhollowcarving@gmail.com or murray.lincoln@gmail.com to make arrangements to have an Office Owl shipped to your office.Murray Lincoln

Saturday, August 27, 2016

Box for JordanJordan, a 20 year old, passed away earlier this summer of 2016. He had played on a local football team that my Grandson also had been part of. Some of the Moms of fellow football players decided to present something special to Jordan's Mom. They asked me to decorate the Blanket Box that you see in the photos. The surface is very rough and it has a Oil Finish on the Pine (Spruce - Like wood) - making it stubborn to apply the Pyrography images.... but here it is completed and about to be delivered. I designed two feathers for handles to lift the box as you can see.Murray Lincoln

But where do you start to do a spoon? Here is the “How To” just for you.

First there is the pattern… which at
times is pieced together. The Celtic
designs are many… and the people that are interested in “Celtic Things” all
have different things that they like.

Each spoon has a basic structure so
that it will hold up and stay together. As well each one can be very delicate
in its actual make up but if the wood is too thin at any one point it will very
likely break. Just one little one
asking, “Grandma can I hold it…?” will be sure to see a spoon break.

At times my customers are involved in
the process of the design as well.

Just before Christmas I received an
email from California asking if I did commissioned work and explaining that
this fellow would like a special Celtic Knot in a Love Spoon.

He sent patterns and photos of knots
that he liked. Together with an exchange back and forth by email we came up
with almost the right design… at least it was a good and complete design. It
was the start.

I drew the pattern for the Spoon on
paper and then when the cut out was made it was transferred to a plastic sheet
making the pattern long wearing and worth a lifetime of carving. For plastic I
use the flat sheets of plastic cut from boxes and containers that store bought
products come in. These items are
scheduled to be re-cycled. Each flat
sheet makes a great pattern possibility.

Next I transfer the pattern to the actual
wood that I will be using.

In the case of this Celtic Love Spoon
I use recycled wood… and particularly old Mahogany from old houses that are
being torn down or renovated. A local
recycling store, “Re-Store” (connected to Habitat for Humanity) is a great place
to pick up the old lumber. And the quality of the Mahogany is excellent
compared to what is harvested and sold today. It usually has a rich colour and
is very firm to carve. The finish is amazing as well.

After the spoon is roughed out by
cutting around the outline I then cut the center sections out with a scroll
saw. This part is tedious but very helpful in speeding up the process. You could carve the holes but it takes time –
too much time.

Step by step each section of the
spoon is carved carefully. Once the pattern is cut out there are no more changes
that can be made. And also no more mistakes
can be covered up either… so you simply don’t make mistakes!

Finally I begin the slower task of
sanding and smoothing out the carved piece so that the knife cuts can no longer
be seen.

An application of finishes and Tada…
you have a Celtic Love Spoon. And in
this case there are two spoons completed this time around.

A photo will offer you more than 1000
words. You can see all of these
below. And finally having published these
photos to my Blog today – they are now going to show up in “Pinterest”

You can also see these on Facebook at
“Misty Hollow Carving by Murray Lincoln”.
Please drop by and offer a “Like” – it will help me get the word out to
others about the carvings at Misty Hollow.

In a recent conversation with a friend of mine I heard of a need for Comfort Birds and the Hospice Peterborough program.

After listening to the explanation I did some research and found that a man by the name of Frank Foust has been making these small creatures since 1982- As of 2011 he had carved over 1,100 of them.

I began my new adventure of carving these birds this summer.

Yes, Frank Foust has sold them as fund raising items to help places and people after like the earthquake in Haiti.

"Comfort Birds are given to those in need as a token of kindness" ~ Frank Foust

Another carver, Stanley Cook, wrote - "To date the birds which I have carved are made of basswood and finished with either a golden pecan or cherry finish and take a few hours to complete. Because of the natural variations in wood and the finish used, no two birds are alike. In future, I hope to try different types of wood for unique results."

Stanley Cook

There is a reference to Jesus' words in the New Testament....

“Consider the sparrows; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”

- Matthew 6:26

Like Stanley Cook (I am borrowing his words) I intend to ..."Carve these little birds as an act of kindness, to those battling depression, cancer, blindness or other life altering illnesses."

The
following article arrived to my email In-Box this morning. After reading this I just had to pass it on.

With World
Cup Soccer championship game just completed yesterday the events the Referee
faced are very vivid in my mind.

I am a
Referee in a number of areas of my life.
This week I have to make “call” in plays that have unfolded in front of
me. The plays have left some folk calling for me to “blow the whistle”. Others are saying they did nothing wrong, “It
wasn’t my fault!” declares the other party in the skirmish that is taking
place.

And I am
the Referee. Please read this article
with these thoughts in mind – you may well be facing a similar problem(s). Enjoy.

Making the Tough Call when everyone’s
eyes are on you

By
The John Maxwell Company

Entire
countries come to a standstill during the World Cup soccer tournament, as
people pause from their daily routine to tune into the action. Part of the
excitement comes from the fact that games are often decided by a single goal.
One well-timed kick can make all the difference.

With such a
small margin separating victory and defeat, the decisions made by referees play
a significant role in determining the outcome of a match. This is particularly
true when two players collide within the penalty box, and officials must
determine whether or not a foul has been committed. If so, a penalty shot is
awarded and one team gains a golden opportunity to score a goal.

With tens
of thousands of spectators in the stadium, and millions of fans watching on
television, referees are under immense pressure to make the right call.
Whatever decision they make will be subject to endless scrutiny and fierce
criticism.

Like soccer
refs, leaders eventually face situations that require making a tough call. Each
tough call has the following in common:

- It demands
a risk. If it’s easy or comfortable, then it’s not a tough call.
- It will be second-guessed and criticized. You will never make a tough call
and have unanimous support for your decision.
- It is costly. You will lose sleep over it, sacrifice finances because of it,
and perhaps even sever relationships as a consequence of it.
- If made correctly, a tough call will lead to a breakthrough that lifts your
leadership to a higher level.

How do make
good decisions in circumstances where the right choice is not perfectly clear
and where so much is at stake? Let’s return to the analogy of the soccer
referee for guidance. A good referee…

1) Makes a timely decision

A referee
does not wait several minutes after blowing his whistle to issue his decision.
As soon as he stops play, the official confidently steps forward to signal
whether or not an infraction taken place.

If you tend
to dread the finality of taking a stand or calling the shots, you may be
tempted to put off the decision. It’s easy to rationalize your unwillingness to
decide.

For example:
• “That can wait. There’s no reason to rush. We’ll cross that bridge when we
come to it.”
• “It’s such a tough call. It could go either way. I’m just not sure, so I’ll
reflect on it for a while.”
• “It’s a lose-lose decision, where someone’s going to get hurt regardless. So
why not put if off and postpone the damage as long as possible?”

If any of these comments sound familiar, your challenge is to condense the
timeframe in which you make your decision. Although you may trick yourself into
believing that “it can wait,” a cloud of worry will hover over your head until
you take initiative to make the call.

2) Refuses to surrender the decision
to others

A good
referee refuses to be swayed by the crowd, and makes his judgment according to
personal observation rather than the emotions of spectators.

Likewise,
competent leaders make decisions after weighing the evidence in light of their
vision and values. Rather than seeking to please their people or to pacify
their critics, leaders ground their choice on what’s best for the long-run
health of the organization.

3) Does not say “yes” to everything

Soccer
players notoriously try to influence the officials, diving to the turf in
exaggerated pain in the hopes of persuading a referee to call a foul. Thus, a
good ref frequently denies players’ requests for a foul to be called, refusing
to blow the whistle every time a player falls to the ground in apparent agony.

You’re not
making smart decisions if you’re always giving the go-ahead or thumbs-up. By
saying “yes” to everyone; you’re not being helpful and empowering. Instead,
you’re irresponsibly robbing resources from what matters most.

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

The Necklace is carved from an old piece of Pine taken from a Old Steamer Trunk that crossed the Atlantic Ocean a number of times between Montreal, Quebec, Canada and Britain. Its owners lived in Truax, Saskatchewan, Canada. They had immigrated from Britain in about 1900 - their travels took them home often.The Trunk came into my possession following an Estate Sale. My mother had bought the old house in Truax for a mere $500 with all its contents. The $500 represented 10 years of unpaid taxes.When my mother finished with the Trunk I dismantled it in hopes that some of the wood was carveable.... It was and here is the first result.

After this weekend I was able to complete two more Owl Necklaces as well. Here they are and then from here they are whisked away to my Pinterest Pyrography Board.

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Misty Hollow Carving is the sponsor of this Blog. Misty Hollow began in 2008. This is some of "The Misty Hollow Story" and how the Northumberland Community Futures Development Corporation helped me. The Video was created by Chris Oliver of CCO Productions

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Murray Lincoln

The Wood Carver of Misty Hollow

About the Wood Carver of "Misty Hollow"

Murray launched Misty Hollow carving in 2008 after retiring as a Minister. Now besides working at his Misty Hollow Carving Shop he is also involved in a number of volunteer roles in the community. Contact Murray at murray.lincoln@gmail.com