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Friday, December 17, 2010

The delivery room

I first of all wasn’t going to spill this part of the story, but I just can’t contain myself, so I don’t see why I should..!!! Here it goes.

On Thursday I personally made my way to Dublin, with my baby in my bag. I had 320 A4 pages, put into a huge envelope and I was setting out to approach the publishers who were miraculously holding a competition for those who had written a book! All entrants had to have their manuscript in their publishing house... by the 17th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you believe the coincidence!!!!! The deadline I’d set for myself and the deadline this publishing house had set, were the same!!!!!!!! This was too much for me to take in. But I did I take it in, because it was reason number 3 for me to put the pressure on myself in terms of finishing the first draft! So yesterday, the 16th, turned out to one of the biggest milestones of my life. Really really really! Even with the doubts I was having of what had eventually become my story, I still felt like I was floating on air, as I made my way to Dublin, to hand deliver my baby! Yes, the news is, I’ve been secretly giving birth for the past... 9 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And the step I took yesterday, made every single moment worthwhile!

I had no clue of where I was going, my shoulder was aching with this heavy manuscript that contained so many details of my past and of which I was about to unburden my body and soul (!!!!!) from! Finding the publishers, turned out to be so easy - absolutely everything was working in my favour. People helped me to get to where I needed to be, and suddenly there it stood! The place where magic happens: The publishers. Man, I got goose-bumps when I first set eyes on it and I felt like this was only the beginning... of the rest of my life!!! Wow... All those feelings of panic, exhaustion, sleepless nights, they were all in aid of that moment: I stood in the doorway and was greeted by a guy who works there. He was delighted to see my baby! I opened my bag and wanted to hand it to him, but my baby was stuck! The envelope was jammed and sitting so snugly in my bag! The baby was reluctant for us to part ways. But this guy was so excited that I was hand-delivering, and so he was only too happy to help! His exact words were: “Your baby won’t come out!” I’m like: “it’s stuck!” But together we brought my 'first' into the world!!!!!!! I was ecstatic... 2 minutes after the delivery, I was walking away; 2 kilo’s lighter (without any extra baby weight!) and feeling brighter than ever before. I cried some tears of relief and joy (yet again.. seems to be something I’ve been doing quite a lot of lately) and with that, a whole new stage of creating my first (and definitely not my last) future book has started.

What an amazing day! To say that I was excited wouldn’t come close to how I felt yesterday. As I said already, it was one of the biggest days of my life! Whatever happens from here on in, I haven’t a clue. But I know I need to stay calm and I need to see the coming month (or however long) as a new phase. I know the book is still changing. It isn’t set in stone and it was only the first publishers I’ve approached. But the fact that I’ve now something ‘concrete’ enough that can be classed as a complete manuscript is already huge and will definitely lead to bigger things – it simply has to! I’m winding down the tale and will slowly distance myself. But at the same time, there’ll still be work to be done. There’ll also be more outside help, in whatever form that may be! Yay!!! It’s like with any child that first comes into the world; it still needs care, nourishment and will inevitably undergo a lot of change. It needs more attention after the birth than before birth! And that’s what I have to see that coming period as being!

When I was editing, I truly felt, I had nothing left to say... on that particular subject anyhow. Because, yes, I still have so much more to tell through the words I choose to write. But... I’m taking onboard what my Mam said to me the other week “Niamh, you could keep on writing forever!!! At some stage, you have to say for now, it’s enough”. And this is probably exactly what you’re thinking right now, as you’re reading about my writing adventures! So, I’ll take this as a hint! I’ve revealed enough for the moment. And after 6 weeks of research and ‘training’ and 9 weeks of proper focus, concentration and daily devotion to the manuscript, and maybe... 143,988 litres of green, herbal, ginger, peppermint and camomile tea later... The baby has been delivered!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!