A collection of thoughts and nonsensical ramblings of a forty-something single guy in search of truth and a sense of purpose in his otherwise inconsequential life

50… and it sucks

Victor Hugo once said that “forty is the old age of youth; fifty the youth of old age”. And yet another great man, Mark Twain, I believe, quoted that ” age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter”. Well, in a few days time (June 22 in case you’re interested) I will be celebrating a half century of living in this crazy crazy world, and I can tell you honestly and without batting my short eyelashes that it sucks to high heavens. Yes, you read it right, IT SUCKS! I mean, who would actually believe that having lesser energy and having chronic back and joint aches are a good thing, and that an advancement in age (and in this case, over advancement) is just in one’s mind? I tell ya, all those nicely written quotes extolling the virtues and joys of getting old are pure, unadulterated BS — sayings that I think were just to ease up the usual jitters and anxiety of the awful realization that things are not going to be what it’s used to.

Funny, when I was younger (well, ok… A LOT younger, like when I was a teenager) I wanted to be older so that I can finally do things that I wanted like drive around without anyone looking over my shoulders, spend my money on things without worrying what my parents would say (and do to me if they find out I’ve been spending on useless things). In short, do anything, and I mean anything, stupid or not, without asking for consent. Do things on my own terms and best of all, go watch an adult movie without the guilt, hah!

Know what? Now that I’ve practically done all those things I suddenly realized that getting old isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. Sure, there are some benefits to getting older but health-wise, you’re just a few steps away from having heart disease and all sorts of life-threatening ailments that, like it or not, comes with getting old. You come to grips with fear, and anxiety as years pass and you dread every minute you spend inside a doctor’s clinic thinking, “what the hell is it this time?”.

Oh sure, 50 is still young and am still 15 years away from being qualified for a senior citizen’s card; while some may even go as far as to say that 70 years old is still in the distant future, but you if you think about it, 20 years isn’t that far off — at least not for someone who spends the day counting the days — remember, we’ve just celebrated (is that even the right way to say it?) the 20th anniversary of the Mt. Pinatubo eruption. It was an event that is still fresh in everyone’s mind like it was only yesterday — at least for those over thirty years of age.

Perhaps, if I had my own family to fall back on I’d be thinking differently about getting older. But I don’t, unfortunately, and the reality that I will spending the last days of my life alone and not unlike the grumpy old men that one sees in the movies — complaining and ranting about practically everything — in an old folks home is fast becoming a reality as days pass quickly. And unless one is filthy rich (which I am not), or is financially well-off (which I hardly am, by the way), the odds of finding someone who will love and care for you for the rest of your miserable years is, well… nil. It would indeed be a miracle if someone comes along and accepts you, warts and all, for what you are and not for what you have. But that’s really stretching things too far since I ain’t lucky, and have never been good, with women anyway. Ah well, that’s just me being selfish that’s all, always thinking about me, me and me. The sooner that I accept the reality that things are, in my case, going to go down the drain in the years to come the easier, perhaps, it will be for me to settle into this thing called old age.

Ah well, that’s just life for you…

Anyways, now that I’ve let things out of my chest, back to blogging… again. It’s been a while since my last post, obviously as one can see, and just as well since there’s not much happening in my life lately… at least, nothing worth blogging anyway. Oh sure I’ve lots of things to rant about (notice I didn’t include “rave” since there’s not much to rave about these days) like the ongoing senate brouhahas, the RH Bill and the events of the past two months like the execution of three Pinoy drug mules all the way to the current issue in the Spratly Islands, but somehow I just didn’t feel like writing about them, or my take on those events. Either I’m too Goddamn tired of writing or my muse just wasn’t doing her job inspiring me these days. Heck, even my writing stint at the POC is greatly affected by my bout of laziness.

Anyways, in an effort to show some normalcy in my blogging (as well as this long-neglected blog) life I decided to post some pictures that, well, sort of tell the story of what’s been happening lately in my less-than-significant and boring life.

Meet Elmer, the recent addition to our family.

He’s a purebred dachshund that I acquired more than two months ago, and who is now creating havoc around the house with his antics. A teething pup isn’t really for the impatient, but dang, he is really cute and lovable when he wants to be.

And what about our diva slash hound Arabella? Well, she’s gone now. Nope, she’s still alive and well but we’ve sort of dispatched her to another and much better location that would, I believe, better suit her hyperactive nature. Late last year we asked a dog-loving family friend to adopt her after she became somewhat difficult to handle (I guess moving to this tinier place was a bit too much for her) and she would sometimes resort to nipping at other people, the maid especially. The large compound where she now resides have been good for her and she can run (and boy, she really loves to run) around freely. And the good news is, ok, it’s a surprise, really, is that she became pregnant and later bore four pups. Unfortunately though, only two survived. Even the family friend was surprised as Arabella, at seven years of age, isn’t exactly THAT young and this was her first litter. He resorted to calling the pups, menopause puppies.

Anyone who’s been following this blog would by now know that I frequently post pictures and write about my food trips… oh well more likely food binges. Most would recall that many of the grubs that I sample from the different food places I visit would consist of greasy, and yes, mostly unhealthy but sooo delicious foods that, if consumed daily, would in all probability lead to a heart attack. Well, all that has changed lately. Not only have I started to cut down on my food intake (that is, if I can help it), I’m also trying to wean away from the fatty, greasy foods that I loved so much. These days, I limit my rice intake, as well as meat and rely more on veggies and fish. I guess old age and the ever-looming threat of a heart failure contributed to my 180 degree turnabout.

While I do consume a good amount of veggies in the past, nowadays, I tend to double the intake and whenever possible, I order salads instead of the usual fare of meats whenever I eat out. Like in CYMA, the Greek/Mediterranean resto that I patronize for instance, I prefer this tuna salad over the meat and potatoes that I usually consume and man, does it taste good! And yes, that’s raw tuna meat and some fish (also raw) that I couldn’t identify (have to check on the menu for that) and an assortment of fresh vegetables and olives, plus feta cheese and potatoes. If that ain’t healthy for you, I don’t know what is…

Oh, and in addition to TRYING to eat healthier, quitting cigarettes (but you know about that, don’t you?) I started to exercise as well — and that is after about two decades of inactivity. Since late last year I’ve been spending time walking and running and sweating it out on my treadmill (yes, I also bought one for the purpose) for 30-35 minutes, four to five times a week. Am still far off from qualifying for the marathon though and equally far off winning the battle of the bulge around my waistline, but I do plan to continue and is still aiming for that holy grail of middle-aged baby-boomers: losing twenty++ pounds. I may have increased my resistance on the treadmill but still suck at the weight-loss department. I’m not really that fat, as some of you who have met me know, but I do need to lose a few inches as well as poundage on the midsection. So, any suggestions, aside from having liposuction??

And last, but not the least, here’s something that I caught while inside a supermarket…

With it’s size and financial might, you’d think that SM Supermarket Inc. would have hired a proofreader just for this purpose.

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15 Responses

Sounds like you’re fighting the good fight…I kind of let my exercise routine fall by the wayside, but have picked myself up and am back with it…treadmill, exercise bike, strength training and getting back to dancing (love it). And Elmer is a cutie…puppies (or kittens) are a handful. Before my last elderly cat died, I swore I’d never get another kitten…then someone said their neighbor had one kitten left that they were going to kill if someone didn’t take her (do I have sucker written on my forehead, or what?)…so, of course, I took her…she’s now 5 years old and still runs around like a little maniac, but that’s okay…she helps keep my feeling young…and for a 52 year old, that’s a good thing!!

Happy 50th, Pards. I wish you many more happy and healthy years to come. At least you’re TRYING to eat and live healthy not like some people who don’t even try at all.

Like you, I’ve been having problems maintaining my blog due to a lack of energy. I still love to write but thanks to a hectic work sked, I’m mentally drained to even write a single paragraph in the evenings.

Take care always, Pards. Hope to enjoy a few healthy (?) beers with you someday. 🙂

By the way, you only have 10 years to go to avail of a senior citizen card not 15! bwahahaha.

Joking aside, have a happy happy birthday and try to focus on the positive side of life, stick to your new improved health regimen and the rest will simply fall into place … warts, joints aches et al 😉

Feeling a bit blah about turning 50 is normal for men, I guess. After all, while us girls have role models like Oprah constantly telling us that age is power, you guys have …uh…. David Hasselhoff, hehe.

We have a dachshund, too. We hate how he BARKS like a much bigger dog but when he gives us the ‘look’ (similar to the one Elmer has going on in those pics), we’re goners. Elmer’s going to be a handful. A tip: Wear socks around the house while he’s teething. 😉

run4joy59> It is indeed an uphill battle with the bulge around my midsection and I try not to get waylaid by my laziness as much as possible, but sadly, I also fall victim to such from time to time and I literally have to force myself to get up on the treadmill, hehe. I guess it comes with the territory… the laziness, I mean. Pets can indeed be a handful around the house sometimes but you’re right, they keep us young (at least, mentally) and and kinda makes life interesting, don’t ya think? Thanks for dropping by…

PAnaderos> Thanks for the greet, pards. Looks like I’m not the only one having trouble maintaining on online journal, huh? Oh well, life does get in the way in everything, doesn’t it? Oh and I’m still looking forward to that bottle (or two) of beer with you one day, pards. 😀

Buday> That’s mid-life crisis for ya.,,, hay, how I long for those days when I cared not a bit about life, love and death,,, tsk! Oi! that’s one thing I hate about dachshund as well, the bark! Grabe talaga when he gets excited, neighbors think I have a huge dog inside the house. But at least they’re good for keeping away potential robbers, hehe.

‘since I ain’t lucky, and have never been good, with women anyway’ that was the line that stuck. 😀 he he

i felt that it was not about luck, or being good (with women), you yourself seems not to welcome the idea of being with somebody. but that’s just me. i am not criticizing but only telling what i feel (feeling madam rosa). ha ha

eneweiz. 50. a few years more and i’ll be 50 and yet with my current age, i’m feeling joint pains already. not on a daily basis yet (thankfully). it also makes me scared. i do fear the unknown but mostly i do fear the picture of somebody wiping my a** for me.

i know you’ll have a nice (if not wonderful) birthday. glad to know you are working out and is being conscious and cautious on what to eat. all the best. 🙂