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What is Wrong with this paragraph? Both Hester and Chillingworth committed sins. Hester Prynne committed the sin of adultery, her greatest sin was in initially marrying a man she did not love. She marveled how she could ever have been wrought upon to marry him. (p. 121). It also says: She deemed it her crime most to be repentant of, that she had ever endured and reciprocated the lukewarm grasp of his hand, and had suffered the smile of her lips and eyes to mingle and melt into his own. (pgs ) Chillingworth commits sins against others, A man burdened with a secret should especially avoid the intimacy of is physician (113.) This quote shows how Chillingworth is a sinner.

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What is wrong with this paragraph? Original textCorrect the text Both Hester and Chillingworth committed sins. Hester Prynne committed the sin of adultery, her greatest sin was in initially marrying a man she did not love. She marveled how she could ever have been wrought upon to marry him. (p. 121). It also says: She deemed it her crime most to be repentant of, that she had ever endured and reciprocated the lukewarm grasp of his hand, and had suffered the smile of her lips and eyes to mingle and melt into his own. (pgs ) Chillingworth commits sins against others, A man burdened with a secret should especially avoid the intimacy of is physician (113.) This quote shows how Chillingworth is a sinner.

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Quote Integration Reminders The quote you are using should be relevant and illustrate your point. All quotes must be introduced, cited and expanded on. Example: Hester Prynne commits the sin of adultery; however, her greatest sin was in initially marrying a man she did not love. Hester does not understand how she could ever have been wrought upon to marry [such a man]! She deemed it her crime most to be repented of, that she had ever endured and reciprocated the lukewarm grasp of his hand (121). Although Hester was once able to conceive that she loved Chillingworth, she now realizes that it was only because she did not know true love. While she used to think of this domestic scene as happy long ago, she now sees how dismal it was and counts it among "her ugliest remembrances (122).

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Ways to introduce a quote: Introduce a quote with a complete sentence and a colon. Use an introductory or explanatory phrase followed by a comma. Hester shows her sympathy for Dimmesdale when she tells him, That old man! – the physician! – he whom they call Roger Chillingworth – he was my husband! (371) Make the quotation part of your own sentence without any punctuation between your words and the quote. This is where you should be with your quote integration. While she used to think of this domestic scene as happy long ago, she now sees how dismal it was and counts it among "her ugliest remembrances (122). *If you chose the option above, you may have to change something in the original text to make the quote fit in your sentence. To do this place the change in brackets []. Hester rebukes the towns people when she acknowledges that Roger Chillingworth [was her] husband (371).

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Example Two Hamlet deals with issues of duty and revenge. This theme is most evident in the character Hamlet. So art thou to revenge, when thou shalt hear. (1.5.12). Hamlet also says, Haste me to know t, that I, with wings as swift/As meditation or the thoughts of love,/May sweep to my revenge. (58-59) which explains that Hamlet intends to revenge his father swiftly. King Hamlet also embodies revenge. Murder most foul, as in the best it is,/But this most foul, strange, and unnatural ( ).

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Revised Example: King Hamlet explains to his son that [t]he serpent that did sting thy fathers life/ Now wears his crown ( ). The ghost is referring to his unnatural murder (1.5.31) and thus explaining to Hamlet that Claudius poisoned him. The ghosts reference to Claudius as a serpent alludes to the biblical deception of Satan. Shakespeare suggests Claudius too tries, and succeeds, in usurping a throne that he has no right to much like the devil tries to usurp gods throne.

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Expanding on a quote DosDont Do write 2-3 sentences after the quote that ties it to the assertion you are making. Do refer back to a quote by repeating part of the quote. Do expand on the quote. In some cases, just plopping a quote in is worse than not including one in the essay. It confuses the reader. When you explain a quote your explanation should somehow refer back to your thesis. Repeat exactly what the quote says Dont refer to a quote by saying this quote shows Dont simply move to the next point. If the quote is important enough to be in your essay, it is important enough to be discussed. Dont narrate your essay. You should avoid saying things like this quote is included to prove my thesis… Have two quotes in a row; your commentary should bridge the two

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Citing a Quote All citations should always be done in MLA format (no it is not going away). The citations should be in parenthesis (). It should include the author (if writing about more than one work) and the page number. The period goes after the closing parenthesis.

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Practice Directions: Integrate the following quotes into your own sentence that explains the meaning indicated. 1. Hamlets dual nature Thou this be madness, yet there is method in t ( ). 2. Holdens isolation What really knocks me out is a book that, when youre done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. (18) 3. The difference in Jack and Ralphs leadership styles Lots of rules! Then when anyone breaks em Whee-oh! (33).