Month: March 2017

He also said a large part of feeling stressed is ignoring things that you shouldn’t be ignoring.

“Stress primarily comes from not taking action over something that you can have some control over,” he said. “I find as soon as I identify it, and make the first phone call, or send off the first e-mail message, or whatever it is that we’re going to do to start to address that situation — even if it’s not solved — the mere fact that we’re addressing it dramatically reduces any stress that might come from it.”

In other words, identify the problem, take control of it, and move forward.

6. They don’t focus on problems — only solutions.

Where you focus your attention determines your emotional state. When you fixate on the problems you’re facing, you create and prolong negative emotions and stress. When you focus on actions to better yourself and your circumstances, you create a sense of personal efficacy that produces positive emotions and reduces stress.

When it comes to toxic people, fixating on how crazy and difficult they are gives them power over you. Quit thinking about how troubling your difficult person is, and focus instead on how you’re going to go about handling them. This makes you more effective by putting you in control, and it will reduce the amount of stress you experience when interacting with them.

“The components of anxiety, stress, fear, and anger do not exist independently of you in the world. They simply do not exist in the physical world, even though we talk about them as if they do.” ~ Wayne Dyer

This statement makes you think, doesn’t it? How can something not exist if there are so many cases of it causing trouble in our own physical world? It’s a perfect example of something from the non-physical world creating itself through self-destructive thoughts and choices. The importance in being aware of this is paramount. Without practicing positive thoughts and making positive choices, our lives can go into a tailspin in a hurry. If you’d rather create a life path that takes you toward building a strong, confident inner self that can’t be shaken, practice touching base with each of the following points, every day if needed.

Change

Life is about recalibrating. About continually asking yourself:

1) “What do I have to do to get where I need to be?”

2) “How do I create the life I want?”

We live in a state of constant state. If change is the one thing that you can be sure of, the goal is to figure out how you can use that certainty to your advantage, to modify, transfigure, refashion, and transform your day-to-day being.

Stress: Fight-or-flight

Stress can serve an important purpose and can even help you survive. For our ancestors, stress was a helpful motivator for survival, allowing them to avoid real physical threats. That’s because it makes your body think it’s in danger, and triggers that “fight-or-flight” survival mode.

Fight-or-flight mode refers to all the chemical changes that go on in your body to get it ready for physical action. In some cases, these changes can also make you freeze.

While this stress response can still help us survive dangerous situations, it’s not always an accurate response and it’s usually caused by something that’s not actually life-threatening. That’s because our brains can’t differentiate between something that’s a real threat and something that’s a perceived threat.

Moving forward, you will see the value you give yourself is the value the world reflects to you.

Change your story, Change your life!

Let’s follow the rules here, step by step. If your thoughts can supposedly alter your reality, then you can change that reality through your thoughts, right? Someone once said:

I knew I was anxious (I was so overwhelmed I had heart palpitations), but I didn’t know I had anxiety. I knew I was depressed (I lacked motivation; I was feeling hopeless), but I didn’t know I had depression.

This, of course, was my internal dialogue. To my colleagues, I tried to be the funny, can-do coworker. They didn’t know how scared I was to say no. There was a day at work when we had a PR crisis, and I sobbed hysterically all day. (No one else was crying.) I wish someone had told me my facade was cracking so I would have known. I actually don’t know when others started noticing. All I know is that I still felt like I was getting my work done, like I was holding it together. Right until that last day. Eyebrow day.

After that conversation with my old boss, I finally decided to see a psychiatrist. At my first visit I was diagnosed with major depression and generalized anxiety disorder. Untreated—­probably since childhood—and permeating every cell in my body, the disorders were presenting themselves in manic behavior as well as physical symptoms. Things became clear and began to make sense. The big, overwhelming parts of my life became less so. And having answers, having a name for what was happening to me, made me feel stronger—as if now that I knew what I was up against, I could arm myself. I could fight it.

These days I know what I’m looking for. I can tell the difference between “fine” and “not fine.” I feel the gradual slowing down of my drive and energy that signals my depression is coming, or the physical pressure that indicates an anxiety attack, and I head it off with medication. It’s survivable.

1) I am getting lazy and “can’t be bothered” in my self-care regimen. I hardly keep up with grooming well. This is an area that bugs me.

Problem: Bad time management. Lack of discipline and care in maintaining my physical outlook. Fear of inadequacy and scarcity made me scared to step into hair salons, clinics and facial parlor to groom and care for myself. Appalling!

4) My room cleanliness gets to me every day. I am very irked and bothered by the filth and mess I’m sleeping in every night. But I can’t seem to get behind it to finish my spring cleaning in one go. It needs a major overhaul, which I am constantly trying to work on.

Problem: Procrastination. I always made cleaning the house and my parents’ room priority over mine.

5) I realized over the years I have lost my voice. I became lesser and lesser confident and assured of myself to voice out my displeasure aloud. I became suppressed. As a result, my voice became soft and hardly audible.

Problem: Lack of confidence and fear of being lesser made me withdrawn into my cocoon. I became less agile in my ability to articulate my thoughts into words aloud. Practice, practice, practice! Get louder & more assertive!

6) If I don’t have my parents to do laundry, will I face such problem?

8) YOU START GETTING BEHIND WORK. This is my BIGGEST BANE and issue faced. I am constantly getting behind work as I procrastinate and focus on other lesser priority work. I am struggling to keep up. Always feeling behind. And my frustration grows as I cannot get ahead in life and in my work/business.

Problem: Lack focus and priority. Hampered by distractions and bad procrastination! Constantly behind. When overwhelmed, system freeze and shut down. Anxieties also increased and made things worst. This is a vicious cycle I am finally making sense and working on. I must train my mind to focus and be positive. To break jobs into piecemeal for easier maintenance!

10) It’s hard to get in touch with you. This finally rings a bell. My phobia in receiving calls. But lately, I am making use of my mobile more for contact. Though I still prefer texting over conversing on mobile. It’s a start!