The Asphyx (1973) - a scientist figures out that when you die, an etherial little creature called an Asphyx enters your body. If you can trap this creature and prevent it from entering you, you're immortal. So he devises a method to accomplish this, and then tries it on himself (successfully) and then on his daughter and her fiancee (somewhat less successfully). This bored the crap out of me. Although the plot was fairly original, the whole thing was made like a stage play with characters walking to their designated places on the set and speaking their lines. The almost complete lack of close-up shots rally made me feel like I was ten feet removed from the whole thing. The characters weren't nearly interesting enough to draw me into the movie. The special effect were kind of cool in that retro '70s way. 2/5.

Death Row (2006) - after a jewel heist in which several people were killed, the thieves hide out in an old abandoned prison. Meanwhile some kids are filming a documentary about the place, and of course the ghosts that live there lock the place down and start picking off our characters in gruesome fashion. This is an old favorite of mine, with Jake Busey giving an entertaining performance as the borderline psycho ringleader of the bad guys. The ghosts are kind of cheesy with some shimmering CGI effect added to them, but the action moves along pretty well and the characters were all fun and had personality. 4/5.

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Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

Hitchcock's "I, Confess." This is the film that I saw instead of "Jack, the Giant Slayer," which I hope to see this weekend. It is also the 2nd film I've seen for free at the local library. And because my typing speed is so slow, and because I don't want to type it twice, I'll post my review in sections.

I. Typical film.II. Typical HitchcockIII. Atypical Hitchcock

I. Typical film1. Accents. I first noticed this with 1958's "The Fly," which also supposedly took place in French Canada, but the accents on this film are all over the place. French: Roger Dann. Close enough. German: O.E. Hasse and Dolly Haas. Well, they were suppose to be German, but then you had English: Brian Aherne. Stronger in some scenes than others.American: Anne Baxter, Montgomery Clift, Karl Malden, and Judson Pratt. The only ones with true French Canadian accents are the extras off of the streets.

2. Catholic influence. A good example of how the Catholic Church in the '50's influenced what you saw and did not see. Originally, the hero was suppose to be found guilty and sent to prison. Of course, the hero being a priest, the Catholic Church couldn't have this, so the ending was re-written. Normally, this influence (IMHO) makes for a weaker film, but this time I do think it made for a stronger film. Though, without the participation of the screenwriter. When he saw what they were doing with his script, he took the first plane back to New York City, and they had to bring in someone else for the re-write.

3. The shoulder shot. The villain gets shot in the shoulder. At that distance. With a pistol. In an one-handed grip. Never would have happened, but more then that, the shoulder is a bad place to get shot. Too many bones. Too many major arteries and blood vessels. Too many major nerves. But this is where someone normally gets shot in a film.

While this film was a typical Hitchcock film, there were some atypical elements to it.

1. Filmed on location. While many of Hitchcock's films are shot on a studio set, here the film was shot mostly on location. Quebec City, Quebec, Canada.

2. Appreciation. While I appreciate most of Hitchcock's films, that I've seen, I was surprised at how much I appreciated this one. Which may be for the next reason.

3. Emotional impact. As I said, while I do appreciate most of Hitchcock's films, they seldom if ever arouse any sense of an emotional impact in me. But, this is the first of his films that I can remember, that actually hit me with some sort of emotional wallop.

Next month: Hemingway's "The Sun Also Rises" w/ an all-star cast, and regarded as being Errol Flynn's last great performance. Plus, as far as I can remember, the only time that Errol Flynn and Tyrone Power appeared in the same film together.

Money Talks (1997): Surprisingly fun action-thriller (with elements of comedy thrown in) starring Chris Tucker, as a small-time hustler who initially seems to have the worst of luck, and Charlie Sheen as a whitebread reporter who even though he initially got Tucker's character into trouble may now be the key to him getting out of said jam. This proved far more entertaining than I expected with Tucker really shining and Sheen playing a good straight foil for him. Kinda weird in retrospect to see Sheen playing such a clean cut appearance wise type although admittedly his character does come across as a bit of an a-hole at times. ***1/2 out of ***** stars.

Metropolis (2001): Visual feast for the eyes as in a far-flung retro 20s style future with robots and humans living in a state controlled metropolis but hardly living as equals, a private detective and his nephew trail down a mad scientist only to stumble across a mysterious young girl whose certainly not quite what she seems on the surface. Based on a story from the creater of Astroboy and one can see some of that influence at times. Honestly though, while the visuals were great, the plot seems a bit convoluted and the characters and their motivations are not always as clear as one would like. At times, this is surprisingly predictable, at others it seems completely off the wall. One of those films that likely requires several viewing to take in all of what's going on. Right now, I'd give it ***1/4 out of ***** stars.

Carnage: The Legend of Quiltface (2000) - some kids go out to the desert to take some pictures for their photography class. Once there, they're attacked by Quiltface - so called because he wears a mask knitted together out of the faces of his victims. Except they didn't have the money, time or skill to make such a mask so they got a rubber Halloween mask from the nearest store. This is one of those gems from Brain Damage Films, the guys who aspire to one day, with enough practice, make something on the level of Manos: The Hands of Fate. Half the movie is just these people walking through the desert, filmed by someone who's idea of panning the camera is to just jerk it around. Acting has to be seen to be believed - our male lead spends the last third of the movie in a hysterical state, shrieking his lines in a manner that makes it impossible to understand anything he says. All the "kills" in the movie consist of them taking a novelty machete with a crescent cut out of the blade and holding it up to people's heads. Even though our last guy takes a machete to the forehead, he's up and walking around a minute later.

Quite the...experience. I've watched this three times now, I guess it's got some moronic charm to it. Or maybe I'm the moronic one 2/5.

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Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

DEATH IN THE SHADOWS (1985): A young student investigates her real heritage after her mother is run down by a hit-and-run driver. A slow and forgettable Dutch attempt at a giallo. I watched it last night and I already forgot whodunnit. 1.5/5.

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"The basic plot is that Donna Speir and Hope Marie Carlton, the two undercover DEA agent Playboy Playmates from the last movie, are still running around in jungle shorts, cowboy boots and spaghetti strap T-shirts, firing their machine guns at drug smugglers, Filipino communist guerrillas, and corrupt federal agents while their two friends, Lisa London and Miss May 1984 Patty Duffek, lounge around the pool a lot and talk on speaker phones that look like fax machines."-Joe Bob on SAVAGE BEACH

The Bay (2012) Barry Levinson (Rain Man, Wag the Dog) of all people decided to make a found footage horror movie last year, and surprisingly I thought it was pretty damn good. Mixing a variety of footage sources we hear the story of how a local water source becomes infected with parasites causing the townsfolk to show some nasty symptoms that begin with blisters and gets a whole lot worse.

There is a palpable sense of dread in this movie as we see the infection rapidly affect the townsfolk. Thankfully Levinson keeps shaky cam and cheap jump scares to a minimum. We also get some terrific creepy sound work, and very strong visual effects some of which will stick in your head for a bit. At a tight 80 minutes any small problems I had with the film were easy to overlook and overall I thought it was one of the better recent horror films I have seen. 8/10

Audie Murphy plays an American agent sent to meet with a German scientist,played by George Sanders.During the mission it is revealed that the scientist is a Neo-Nazi developing a weaponized rocket that can be used against the West. Murphy must now destroy the rocket plans hidden in the lab. Things are further complicated when radical Muslims insist on destroying the rocket themselves....and Murphy. After kidnapping the scientist's daughter he must escape Middle Eastern intelligence agencies at impossible odds.Pretty lame film,IMO....Audie Murphy,though a decorated war hero,isn't very convincing in front of the camera. At times the soundtrack wanders from circus-like music to just a beat that sounds like a bongo player being chased by a car. Barely bad enough to be enjoyable. Plus,when he is disguised as an Egyptian,he looks like Omar Shariff exploded all over him.

The State I'm In (2000) - I've never seen "Running On Empty" but this appears to be very much the same sort of thing. Story is told through a girl who looks about 14 (good actress). Her parents were terrorists of some sort (pre 9/11 so I'd guess Euro lefties of some sort) They are on the lamb from the law all the time so she can't get settled and it annoys her. At the same time she loves her parents so there's your tension with that. They are constantly moving and running out of money and having to deal with shady people and avoid the government. Eventually she meets a nice boy so boom more tension. It's told in a slow moving European sort of way. not slow like poorly paced but probably a little mellow for some tastes. It's pretty much your typical really good foreign movie if not hugely ground breaking 4.5 /5

Audie Murphy plays an American agent sent to meet with a German scientist,played by George Sanders.During the mission it is revealed that the scientist is a Neo-Nazi developing a weaponized rocket that can be used against the West. Murphy must now destroy the rocket plans hidden in the lab. Things are further complicated when radical Muslims insist on destroying the rocket themselves....and Murphy. After kidnapping the scientist's daughter he must escape Middle Eastern intelligence agencies at impossible odds.Pretty lame film,IMO....Audie Murphy,though a decorated war hero,isn't very convincing in front of the camera. At times the soundtrack wanders from circus-like music to just a beat that sounds like a bongo player being chased by a car. Barely bad enough to be enjoyable. Plus,when he is disguised as an Egyptian,he looks like Omar Shariff exploded all over him.

That wasn't one of Murphy's gems. He is our big hometown hero, and the local museum has a lot of his memorabilia.

Blood Beast Terror (1967) - Peter Cushing plays a detective investigating a rash of brutal murders. A witness claims to have seen a giant moth flying around, but of course he's written off as having gone mad from the terror. It just so happens that there's a professor living nearby who's area of expertise is moths, and everything he does seems highly suspicious...hmmm. This was decent. The moth was really cheesy and the climax was almost comical, and the movie slows to a near complete stop around the middle, but Cushing is good and the plot is mildly interesting. Sort of has a nice atmosphere about it too. 3/5.

Watched that Flesh Wounds movie again too. The Predator ripoff starring Kevin Sorbo and made by a complete imbecile. I can't stress that word enough - imbecile. It was actually worse the second time than the first.

Tank top chick: "They were injecting this thing with human brain cells, which ended up morphing and multiplying into an intelligence level we would never understand."

Later on Sorbo throws a grenade right at this thing's feet; it stands there looking at it until it expolodes.

1.75/5.

« Last Edit: March 09, 2013, 02:28:43 PM by Jack »

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Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

Sauna (2008) - Polish or something movie. it's not a modern sauna, it's 1595 and the sauna is in the middle of a swamp and full of satan. A couple of guys on some sort of map drawing mission go around and for some reason one of them kills people and it's like okay or something. They make it to a "weird village" where the villagers aren't all that they appear to be! or maybe they are.

It's talky and on a real slow boil, but I still pretty much liked it for the forboding atmosphere, even though it was hard to follow in terms of the specific thingies. At one point the guy picks up a weird piece of paper and sees a K and goes "knute" and then he turns it upside down and it makes a 75 and he goes "75!" and runs out of the house. oookie dokie 3.75/5

Last night my daughters and I watched SILENT HILL: REVELATIONS.Sharon, the sister of the evil demon child Alessa (the one who cursed Silent Hill after members of the local cultthere tried to burn her alive), has been hunted by the cult for 10 years. They are determined to drag her backto Silent Hill and destroy her and Alessa at the same time, once and for all. Overall, this is a trippy and enjoyable film, if you like the first one. I understand that those who played the game don't really like the movies, but having never played any of the games, I found both quite enjoyable.

I also watched Grave Encounters 2. That one I loved enough that it's about to get its own thread!

Jonathan Harker travels from Germany to Transylvania because Count Dracula (Klaus Kinski) has to sign papers in order to purchase a new house. Dracula falls in love ("What a beautiful neck") with the picture of Harker's fiance Lucy (Isabelle Adjani) and sails with countless coffins to Germany. Upon arrival the ghastly bloodsucker unleashes rats and plagues while searching for Lucy ...

Werner Herzog's remake is a slow burning but gorgeous shot drama with a creepy Kinski doing what he always did best. Mild chills but totally worth it. 5/5