Mayim Bialik Shares Her Homebirth Story

Former Blossom star Mayim Bialik calls the birth of her second son Frederick – at home, assisted by a midwife and witnessed by her older son Miles – “one of the most incredible, moving and profound experiences of my life.”

Though she had an “innate desire” for Miles, then 3 years old, to be there for his brother’s birth, she admits she had some worries.
“[W]hat if I wasn’t so serene? What if I screamed and shrieked and cursed?” Mayim writes at kveller.com. “Would that damage him? Scare him? Turn him off to becoming a father when he reached adulthood?”

Shortly before her due date Mayim and her husband showed Miles a kid-oriented video – the preschooler’s first time in front of a TV set – explaining what would happen.

“He was so mesmerized by the lights, the patterns, and the remote control that he hardly seemed to notice that there was a baby coming out of a vagina,” she admits. But once he got over his awe he watched the video “intently and passionately.”

“I held onto the remote’s STOP button when the baby’s heads crowned in each birth, waiting for him to freak out in some way. But he didn’t. He had no notion of it being ‘weird,’ ‘gross,’ or ‘inappropriate.’ His innocence was sobering.”

When the big day came Mayim’s labor was short – after 2 1/2 hours she was ready to push.

“Three pushes later, Frederick slithered out, and Miles was carried out of his highchair to cut the cord. A small spurt of blood startled him, and he promptly asked my husband to finish the job,” she recalls. “Miles then sat down on the floor, and minutes later was handed a bundled up wide-eyed baby brother. He clung to that baby for enough minutes that the midwife had to separate them.”

Looking back, Mayim says she has absolutely no regrets.

“I wish I could tell you that Miles’ initial love for his brother has been sustained for the past 2 years; that he loves his brother more than his fire trucks. But that would be a lie. Having Miles see his brother born in our living room was no solution to sibling rivalry, nor would I say it is the right thing for everyone. But for us, it was a beautiful and organic extension of our parenting philosophy: to let our children experience the world as it is, without being ruled by the fear of ‘What if?’”

she’s odd but not wierd. I consider her like a hippie she wants everything to be natural and pure.
Although I’d love to have a home birth there is no way I’m declining drugs! I’m not out to be super human

Anonymous

Do some research…you’d be amazed at what you’re capable of when you’re properly educated and prepared to handle the pain part of labor. Believe me, natural birth mamas are still human. You never know what you can do until you try! Good luck!

Homebirthed the third time

I understand your fear, but honestly it isn’t superhuman – it is just plain, old human. We women are designed to do this. I had two fully epidurals hospital births, followed by a home water birth with no drugs and I have to say the home birth was about a billion times better. Please, do some research, you might be surprised.

Ladymongoose

We should all fear drugs given at childbirth in hospitals. They are neither natural nor beneficial to either mother or child. I was given Pitocin becuase my doctor didn’t feel my child was progressing fast enough. As a result, he was forced out in an unnatural position becuase he wasn’t ready to be born. He had shoulder dystocia at birth, stretched his brachial nerve plexus and was later diagnosed with cerebral palsy (a common ‘side effect’ of a such a traumatic birth). FEAR DRUGS! You can do it, your body is meant to give birth without drugs. I would give anything to have done it naturally as I feel 100% responsible for my son’s life-long injury. HUGS!!

prissymisschrissy

I totally agree, very few women are taught about the “cascade of interventions” in a routine hospital birth and the complications that those can cause (unexpected prematurity, a NICU stay). Yes, natural birth hurts but in the majority of cases it is the safest choice.

Anonymous

Didn’t your doctor order a c-section?!!! I’m sorry you had to go through this!

Anonymous

That poor kid. She’s worried about screaming and cursing during delivery will scare him out of fatherhood, but allows him to watch his brother being born? I find that a little disturbing. It’s not something a little child understands anyway, and see no valid reason for a little kid to watch a delivery.

Anonymous

midwives are wonderful people i credit the birth of my daughter all to my midwife she is he reason it went so well!

Anonymous

My sons have been present for the births of both their little sisters and are eager to witness the birth of their new baby brother in a few months. Birth is a normal part of life, not some big mysterious, scary event. It’s only scary or disturbing if you let it be. Screaming and cursing could make it a negative event in the child’s mind. But most children whose siblings are born at home view it as just a normal part of life.

Anonymous

I applaude her and what a wonderful exp for her whole family. I am amazed at the stupidity of the people here on the post…

That poor kid. She’s worried about screaming and cursing during delivery will scare him out of fatherhood, but allows him to watch his brother being born? I find that a little disturbing. It’s not something a little child understands anyway, and see no valid reason for a little kid to watch a delivery.

Are you really the uncomfortable with how umm nature works?? Its not like they let him watch a bloody horror movie?? I think it is wonderful to birth in front of your children along with Breastfeed..People need to grow up and realize that God gave us those parts for that very reason..Its not about sex. teaching kids the truth that things are normal and natural is far better way to raise kids than this false fake crap people especially in America think is right.. And yes I am American..sometimes not so proudly!

Fabricjunkie

I feel sorry for all the people who commented and said it’s weird, disturbing, and you’re not trying to be super human…
I watched my 2 youngest brothers being born and it was AMAZING! I was 7 and 10 and both times it made me think of the power of life and nature at a very young age. I was so moved as a child that I decided to birth at home and it was so empowering, beautiful, a life changing experience, easy, I could go on for days. It’s ALL mind over matter. If you let your body and baby take over and trust in your ability to birth you can birth w/ almost NO PAIN, I DID!!! Your body’s natural drugs are stronger than what they give you at the hospital; it’s all in how you control them.

To it being disturbing… Society has made us believe that we should hide birth because it’s nasty, horrific and wrong. But the opposite is true; it is a wonderful part of our everyday lives. EVERYONE has to be born, it’s just natural. That’s why kids don’t freak out like parents think they will. They don’t have years of negative influences on the subject so they view it as normal and could sometimes careless and just want to play w/ their fire trucks

This was a beautiful story, thank you for sharing. I hope more celebrities will follow in your footsteps. And I hope women will read this and know they have options in birth. I was so happy with my decision I am birthing at home again in march and am very excited to have our son there to see his brother come into this world.

Anonymous

Birth does not seem scary to a child if they are taught it is normal. Our society is brainwashed into the idea of birth as a bad thing. If we were all raised seeing our siblings born, our birth outcomes in this country would be MUCH better! My older daughter watched her sister be born (at home) and loved it! (she was a little under 2). I plan to have my childern present at all my future births!!

prissymisschrissy

I totally agree, very few women are taught about the “cascade of interventions” in a routine hospital birth and the complications that those can cause (unexpected prematurity, a NICU stay). Yes, natural birth hurts but in the majority of cases it is the safest choice.

Anonymous

Aren’t we fortunate to have the choice of home birth or hospital birth with or without drugs? While I would not home birth due to my own medical situation, I don’t attack those who do. If you home birth, that is your choice but do not attack those who choose to go to hospital or take the drugs. I do wonder how young children would be effected if something went wrong at a home birth….

Kim

I applaud Mayim for her home birthing choice, and I look at her as a unique individual who uses the brain that the good Lord gave her!
Soooo many women just blindly go through the whole pregnancy/birthing process without a CLUE as to what is going on with their bodies and subsequently the body of the baby that they are carrying.
As someone who did educate herself on home births/hospital births/what to expect/etc I choose to give birth to all three of my children at home, and yes the older siblings were there to watch the births of their younger siblings, and no they weren’t scarred for life for doing so. I can honestly say that if I had to do it all over again I would not change a thing! Each time was so personal and wonderful and different and it was so nice to be surrounded by those who love me and care for me. I had an amazing midwife and she is someone that to this day I think of fondly.
I have since witnessed many other births, including the birth of my grandson…who BTW was born in a birthing center with a midwife, and I can say that the hospital births were way more traumatic to see than any of the home births that I’ve been a part of.
Do I think home births are for everyone? No. It’s something that you truly need to want to happen and something that not everyone is up to committing to. But for those who do make this choice it’s a positive lifetime experience that they will look back at and know it was the right thing for them to do.
I have never met a woman/couple/family that has had a home/midwife birth that has had negative things to say about the experience.
I cannot say the same thing for those who’ve went the hospital route. More than once I’ve had someone tell me if they could do it over they would have choose a home birth with a midwife.
Bottom line though ladies (and future Daddies)…..educate yourselves and KNOW your body and what’s going to happen no matter WHERE you decide to birth your baby!

Ladymongoose

Actually you are 100% wrong about possibly losing my son. He was NOT in danger until pitocin forced him into the birth canal, where he got stuck. What the hell do you know about my situation and feel you have the right to comment on it? Go piss off. My ‘sob’ story is one that MANY parents experience because they are NOT told about the dangers of drugs like pitocin. Idiot.