MEMO TO MEN: Mystery vs. History

MEMORANDUM TO: Men all over the planet FROM: Melissa RE: Mystery vs. History DATE: February 27, 2017

I come to you with a fierce debate today, boys! It’s one that’s been on my mind for awhile and I honestly haven’t chosen a side yet — maybe you can help me out here?

The topic? Mystery vs. History…

In the Internet age, everyone’s life is an open book. Our lives play out in real time on Facebook and Twitter (and Snapchat if you’re one of those young people!) and there’s virtually nothing that is left to the imagination. We know what our friends and family eat for breakfast, their favorite TV shows/sports teams and even their political leanings. Oh, and don’t forget a plethora of photos of their dogs or cats — yes, I know I’ve been VERY guilty of this in the past! There’s nothing left to mystery; a person’s entire life history is seemingly just a click away. All for the taking. All day. Every day.

So when it comes to dating and relationships, it seems like social media has swiftly changed everything. It’s changed the obvious things, like the very way we meet people, but it’s also changed our M.O. even before any dates even take place. I’m not saying this is necessarily a bad things, but…

Think about it this way: Knowing so much about someone so early doesn’t give you a chance to get to know them. There’s something to be said for getting to know someone gradually, for taking your time to learn all about someone. I suppose it’s much like peeling back the layers of an onion — a little at a time is much more satisfying than everything all at once, you know? Maybe it’s just because I’m an incredibly nosy person, but I don’t think I could stop myself from looking, which perhaps is a big problem in itself.

But, really, what would happen if you went on a date without researching on the Internet? Would you really be worse off in the end? Is it always better to know? And, if there’s no intrigue anymore, what is really lost? That spark? That early sense of excitement?

Me? I’m thinking I want to get to know someone on their own terms. On neutral territory and just seeing how things develop from there. Maybe it’s just wrong for someone to have any sort of advantage in the “Getting to Know You” game. Maybe an even playing field is the best way to kick things off? Unless he’s a potential UnSub (Criminal Minds, FTW!) who’s intent on locking me in his basement…yeah, then I definitely want to get all the info on that situation! xoxo

So About What I Said is a daily blog that covers relationships, disabilities, lifestyle and pop culture. I love to laugh and have been known to overshare. I also have an unabashed obsession with pop music, polo shirts, and PEZ dispensers. Read more...