LCD Soundsystem Frontman Has a Cure for NYC Subway’s Brutal Noise

The rhythm of an approaching subway may be music to commuters’ ears, but one legendary electronic musician has had enough with the dissonant beeps of New York’s turnstiles.

James Murphy, the DJ, producer, and former frontman for LCD Soundsystem, told the Wall Street Journal that he’s composed a new soundtrack for turnstiles over the past 15 years.

Murphy confessed to a “love affair” with the subway, although he admitted at times it “sounds quite brutal.”

So he devised a new system. Instead of an electronically generated beep, every turnstile would play a pleasing tone. Each station would have its own signature set of tones, which would all exist within a chord. That way, when lots of people are passing through the turnstiles, the station would be filled with harmony, which you can listen to over at the WSJ.

“It’s an opportunity for music,” Murphy says. “Why not make the worst times in subways the best times?”

Musical signatures aren’t unheard of in public transit. The Seoul Metro, for instance, plays different jingles when trains are arriving and departing, and when a train approaches a transfer station. The alarms on the MTA are purely functional, and are intended to let riders know if a MetroCard has been approved.

It wouldn’t take much to retrofit a single turnstile to play a new tune. But it’s highly unlikely that Murphy’s plan will be realized.

Even though the MTA plans to spend $900,000 a year repositioning turnstiles, and eventually replacing the entire MetroCard system, training a choir of 3,289 fare gates requires more time and money than the MTA can handle.