On Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness

Don’t believe the hype. I’ve watched every Super Bowl, and besides enjoying a few timeless games, I learned one thing. Immediately following the end of the NFC and AFC Championship games, trust your gut and pick the team you feel will win the Super Bowl.

If you are a betting Guy’s Guy, place your bets with friends or whoever as soon as Vegas posts the spread. The tricky part is…don’t change your mind.

It’s amazing how many tales are spun in the two weeks leading up to the Super Bowl. If you swallow all the hype served up during those fourteen days, you’ll be convinced that the Eagles are going to maul the Patriots. You might bet big on the Eagles—maybe even offer to give points. Don’t do that. The NFL and media-driven hype machine are powerful. Why? Follow the money. Over 110 million people watch the Super Bowl. That’s a lot of Pepsi and Doritos.The NFL’s marketing machine needs to create a narrative that generates interest and drama in the game to attract a monster audience for its biggest event of the year. If you’re a sports fan, you know that the NFL’s ratings are down. They need a really big viewer turnout this Sunday night to protect their image.

Putting the hype machine aside, your Guy’s Guy is setting things straight by sharing five reasons why the Eagles won’t win the big game. For context, I’d like nothing more than the New England dynasty to end dramatically this week. I attended Villanova University for my undergraduate studies, and after living four years on the Main Line, I came to respect the Eagles for their grit and heart. I hope they win their first Super Bowl. But they won’t. Here’s why:

1. The Eagles defense is strong, but… There has been so much written about the speed, strength, and surge of Philly’s interior defense. The pundits tell us the way to beat Tom Brady is pressure up the middle, and that’s exactly what Philly’s Fletcher Cox led D-line does so well. What they don’t tell us is that a few weeks ago Eli Manning, QB of this year’s woefully bad New York Giants, passed for 429 yards as he shredded the Eagles porous secondary. Malcolm Jenkins is Philly’s lone star in the secondary. He won’t be enough to hold down a scrappy group of Patriot receivers and the massive Rob Gronkowski at tight end.

2. New England’s underrated defense and offensive line – Like I said,we’re hearing all about the ferociousness of Philly’s pass rush and defensive front line, but nothing about a Patriot offensive line. Let’s not forget that in the AFC Championship game, the vaunted Jaguar defense was sealed off and remained on their heels throughout the second half. The Pats have a stout offensive line that usually knows how to protect Tom Brady. The other thing we’re not hearing much about is New England’s underrated defense, led by coach Matt Patricia. This group improved as the season progressed and let up a total of just 80 points in their last five games. Patricia is a whiz at shutting down his opponent’s top two offensive weapons. His schemes take them right out of the game. The Eagles do have decent running backs and wide receivers. They are balanced, but they have no real superstars on offense. They will have trouble scoring points. That projects a Patriot win if they score over seventeen points against Philly. They will.

3. Nick Foles – I was one of the numbskulls who bought into the Nick Foles hype when he replaced Carson Wentz after his injury. As a result, I lost my fantasy football championship when Foles only scored nine fantasy points in a December night game after the Raiders had been eliminated. Wentz, the Eagles starter, is a young stud QB. He is not easily replaced. Nick Foles is a capable journeyman who had a handful of eye-opening performances and some major duds. I don’t see him outdueling arguably the greatest quarterback of all time on the biggest stage he’s ever been on. A lot of people are wondering which Nick Foles will show up on Sunday. Your Guy’s Guy says it will be the run of the mill journeyman who throws two interceptions after seeing his trusty tight end, Zach Ertz, covered like a blanket.

4. Tom Brady – GOAT? It’s hard to argue against it, but he’s had a few strokes of luck in past Super Bowls against Seattle, and most recently Atlanta. And, he’s forty years old. That’s not enough reason for me to bet against him. He might be this year’s Most Valuable Player and his passing is as accurate as ever. How can you bet against this guy? I’m not. I say he throws three touchdown passes on Sunday.

5. Belechick – GOAT? Arguably. Bill Belechick is not a guy I’d ever root for. He abandoned the Jets, has been caught cheating, and comes across as miserable and kind of a dick. But, he’s a winner and he’s proven he will do anything to win. The Eagles are not a complicated team. They have good balance, pride, and a burning desire to avenge their loss in the 2004 Super Bowl to this same Patriot team. It would be nice if they won. But they don’t have enough weapons. They run a predictable, conservative game plan, and have a second string QB. They cannot afford to make mistakes this week. That does not add up to the Lombardi Trophy.

So there you have it, the cold hard truth about Sunday’s big game. It’s going to be another painful-to-watch victory for the Patriots, unless you are a Patriot fan. Most fans will be pulling for an upset. Sorry, it isn’t happening. Not with Nick Foles at the helm. Maybe next year though…

Final score New England 30 Philadelphia 20, and only due to a let game surge by the Eagles.

This week’s Guys’ Guys of the Week are the New England Patriots. Yikes, it was painful to type that, but a Guy’s Guy means being a good sport, having integrity and recognizing greatness. This is a great team that knows how to adjust during the game and almost always find a way to win.

Since publishing my novel, The Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Love, I’m frequently asked by women where they should go to meet single men. In a previous post, I addressed where guys can find women, and how to approach them within their sanctums. For women, the challenge is far easier. Men are easy to find and easy to approach. So ladies, all you really need to do is think like a man and show up where the fellas like to hang out. The truth is men are everywhere and are usually thrilled when a woman initiates contact with them. But to make it even easier, I’ve broken down the ten top offline locales where guys congregate. Of course men can also be found online or through an app, but I’ll spare you Tinder or Match.com tales and focus on the old school, yet always-effective style of meeting your match organically.

So, in no particular order, here is my Guys’ Guy’s Guide For Women Looking For Guys. All you need to do to succeed is to clean up, show up, and smile and the men will be eating out of your hand. It helps to be friendly, but in most cases you won’t even have to start up a conversation. Men are almost always on the prowl.

1. Bars – Let’s face it. Most men, even if they don’t drink alcohol, like to hang out in bars with their friends. Go into any respectable bar, tavern, or beer garden after work and it will be teeming with guys letting off steam after a tough day. In New York, a great area to meet guys is downtown’s FiDi district. You’ll find lots of financial types throwing cash around after a pressure-packed day in the market.

Sports bars are always loaded with guys also. You may have to compete with the games on television, but if you know anything about sports and have a friendly way about you, you can meet men in bars any night of the week. Whisky and beer tastings and cigar bars are also great places to meet guys, unless you hate whisky, beer, and cigars. Remember, this post is about where guys hang out. No judgments and no you to change in any way. I assure you there will be more guys at the bars than in knitting class.

2. At sporting events – When guys are not watching games on TV, they are attending them. Go to any Knicks, Giants, Jets, Rangers, Nets, Yankees, Mets, or Red Bulls game and you’ll see thousands of men. Yes, they are there to watch a live game which they paid for, but guys enjoy meeting women anywhere so don’t be shy about wearing your team jersey or striking up a conversation with a guy at a game. Timing is everything so you may want to hold back on the rare occasion that the Jets are 1st-and-10 in scoring position.

3. Participating in sports – Yes, there is a trend here. Guys can be found anywhere sports are involved, and often when alcohol is part of the curriculum. Sports that guys like to play while downing a few brews are fishing, golfing, softball, and bowling. You can also find a lot of guys biking, running road races, skiing, surfing, snowboarding, jet skiing, boating, playing tennis, squash, or table tennis. And, you will always find guys working out in the gym, and I’m sure you know guys love to spot fit women in the gym. Sure, you’ll meet guys in yoga class, but there are more guys at the gym and this is about fishing where the most fish are.

4. Near the water – This is another great place to meet guys. Guys love boats, boat shows, surfing, jet skis, fishing, or simply relaxing at the beach or by a lake. And, being outdoors on a nice day seems to loosen people up. You’ll find lots of guys sitting at outdoor cafes enjoying the view with a refreshing beverage in hand.

5. Cars, trucks, motorcycles, and planes – Most guys love vehicles. They like to fix them, polish them, ride them, and talk about them. So, if you’re a woman who loves her wheels, there are lots of places to meet men including car shows, car or dirt bike tracks and races, riding motorcycles, and at auto repair stores. Of course you’re not going to hang out at a parts store unless you need something for your car. The point is dudes like their wheels.

6. Anywhere food is served – Make no mistake, guys love chowing down. The old adage about the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach still rings true. So with that in mind, keep your peepers open for hungry guys anywhere and everywhere food is served. A steak house is a good place to start. Most guys love meat. Personally, I gave up eating animal flesh eight years ago and have never felt better, but my ears still perk up when I hear that old familiar sizzle of a juicy steak hitting a fired up grill. Guys also like Mexican, Italian, ethnic foods, seafood, and foods they can pick up in their hands. Guys love breakfast, but not so much brunch, but that’s for another column.

7. Traveling – Happening guys are often on the go. That makes airport lounges, airplanes, hotel bars, ferries, and shared car services prime locations for meeting men. And when a guy is in transit, if he’s not on the phone or buried in his iPad or a book, guys are savoring their escape from being chained to their desks. I’ve met lots of women traveling, and have found that women on the go are empowered, aggressive, and usually up for fun. Ladies, it’s time to cash in those frequent flyer miles. You can easily meet quality men on a subway or a bus if you keep an open mind and are opportunistic about these means of transportation. We all have to get to work, right?

8. Tech Stores and conferences - There are so many guys into tech that you can have your pick at any tech or digital conference, store, or class. And guys love show off their technical chops to ladies. This should be easy pickings, especially if you go for the “nerds” who seem to be taking over the world.

9. Work – Despite all the warnings, work might be the very best place to meet guys. It’s also a great environment to see men in action. You can tell if they’re arrogant, power tripping, or a Guys’ Guys by how they behave and treat their colleagues. The only caution is when dating your boss or a guy who reports to you. Otherwise, all bets are off if you use your head and can handle the potential adversity that comes with having a relationship in a working environment. Your best move might be to pick a guy who works for a vendor or a company you do business with, especially if you can keep your romance separated from your working relationship.

10. Anywhere – The bottom line is men are all over the place and every single dude I know is open to meeting interesting women. I’ve only scratched the surface here, but I think you get the picture. Making new connections with men is a matter of confidence, demonstrating your sense of fun and adventure, and a desire to play the game of love. Good luck. I hope you win.

This week’s ”Guy’s Guys of the Week” are all the wonderful single women in New York City. My hometown is bursting with the smartest, hardest working, super capable, beautiful, and stylish women in the world. I empathize with their plight to meet men who are worthy of their talents.

When the leaves start turning red, gold, and brown most folks pull out the sweaters from the back of their closet and slide back into their tried, true, and predictable pattern of fall activities.

Now, there is nothing wrong with football games, pumpkin pie, picking apples, or taking a long drive to bask in the peak colors of the autumn foliage. Folks who live in the Northeast love having four seasons and they know how to make the most of the myriad activities that take place at this wonderful time of year. Some call it cuffing season, when the swimsuits get packed away and it’s time to snuggle with your partner for the wintery months.

So, are we in too much of a routine now, folks? That’s where your Guy’s Guy comes into the picture. As somewhat of a contrarian when it comes to following set rules, I’ve cobbled together a handful of ideas for you to consider as we head deeper into autumn. So in no particular order here is my Guys’ Guy’s Guide to Unconventional Things to Do This Fall.

Drum roll, please…

1. Hit the Beach – Yes, you read that correctly. After Labor Day, most people snap into that back-to-school mode way too quickly. The Hamptons crowds return to Tribeca and the “Bennies” finally pack up and leave the Jersey Shore towns to the locals. But, guess what? With climate change scientifically proven and the warmer temperatures going deeper into the year, September now feels like summer. If you hit the beach in September and October, the traffic is minimal, the water is still warm, and there are no crowds. And, the beach is peaceful and calm. Just the way we like it when we want to get away for a few days. And, September and early October have a number of holidays that can make for a number of three-day weekends. As I write this, we are in the latter stages of October and it’s 82 degrees in New York City. There is still time for a swim. And when the water gets too cold, you can always take a nice long stroll along the boardwalk.

2. Change Your Eating Habits – Just because summer is over and you’re more apt to cover up your body more it doesn’t mean it’s the time to binge and pack on the pounds for the next six months. In fact, the new season is the perfect time to review your dietary habits and make a commitment to a lifestyle change, namely in your relationship with food. Please note that I did not recommend going on a diet. If you want to knock off some poundage for a short time, diets are great. And, there is no better time to diet than in the late spring so you can show off your stuff all summer long. What I’m suggesting is a complete review and potential overall of how you eat and relate with food. It takes time to make real changes in this area, but if you give yourself six months you will see miraculous results that will stay with you next summer and beyond. If you can cut way, way down on meat, fried foods, dairy, bread and pasta and pizza, and of course, sugar, you will find yourself be bursting with energy while your carnivorous friends are loading up on comfort foods, becoming more sedentary and probably getting a bit chunky. You know this happens every year. So don’t be that guy. Change your relationship with food.

3. Take a Trip to the Zoo - There are two times of the year to go to the zoo—in the spring and in the fall. My first preference is the spring because the animals are lively and pretty randy, too. But fall is also a great time to check out the Bronx Zoo. The foliage is gorgeous, the crowds are manageable, and the animals are fairly active as the weather cools down. In the summer and winter you rarely see the animals doing anything beyond sleeping or briefly lumbering over to their food tray.

4. Train for a marathon - Yes, I realize that the NYC Marathon takes place on the first Sunday of November. A year before running my first marathon, I was running on a Sunday morning listening to the marathon broadcast on the radio through my ear buds. I decided right then to run in the New York City Marathon the following year. And I did. Instead of cramming three months of training into a grueling summer, I began laying down my training base and running foundation a year in advance. I’m really glad I did this because by the time race day came around I was in tip-top shape and ran a faster time in my second thirteen miles. Having that strong foundation of running for a solid year also gave me time to cultivate some personal discipline and learn how to listen to my body when those inevitable tweaks and injuries sprang up.

If you don’t fancy yourself as a marathoner, you could start a fitness regime in the fall with a goal of getting into the best shape of your life by the following summer. If you stick to your program, most likely you will.

5. Make a List, Then Do Your Holiday Shopping Before Thanksgiving – Some folks love that scramble for presents during those frantic final weeks and days of December. Not me. I prefer to think things out in advance, set my budget, and scour the e-tailers for the best prices on the items I want to buy for my peeps. Yes, this is a bit anal, and you may get slightly better deals if you wait until the last minute, but who needs the hassle? If you try shopping early some time, you’ll realize how much easier it is to shop, how much money you can save, and how much more time you have on your hands during the holidays that you can spend partying with your homeys and loved ones.

There will be plenty of days ahead when you can you curl up in that chunky sweater with your honey in front of the TV. This year, consider trying on a few fresh ideas for fall. As DT says, “What have you got to lose?” If you don’t see me, I’m probably at the beach.

This week’s GUY’S GUY OF THE WEEK is Robert Zimmerman, better know to most as Bob Dylan, folk singer and the voice of our generation, for his being awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature. Well-deserved.

Major League Baseball is entering its annual pennant chase, tennis’s US Open has taken center stage in New York, and another NFL season is about to kick off.From what was once limited to a few football crazies to a mainstay in every office and group of friends across America, fantasy football has taken our sports-centric culture by storm.

I’m not a licensed fantasy football expert, but I’ve played and succeeded in a league for close to twenty years now. Whether you are a Guy’s Guy or Girl’s Guy, here are a few nuggets to get you off to a good start this season.

What League is best for you?

Although there are many league options including auctions, PPR (points per reception), and ten to fourteen team leagues, far and away the most popular leagues are made up of twelve teams. Most have no or limited keepers and feature a snake draft where team one selects first in the round one, then last in the second round, and so on. Each week your team is pitted against another, and for the next thirteen weeks you play head to head until the playoffs. Each team plays two running backs (RB), one quarterback (QB), two wide receivers (WR), one flex player (RB, WR or TE), one tight end (TE), one team defense (D), and one kicker (K).

Strategy.

Although the rules of the NFL have evolved over the past decade to favor passing and scoring, running backs are still a key consideration for your early picks. Many pro teams have shifted to committee backfields that deploy multiple running backs. This makes drafting at least one “bell weather” RB early on a team that prefers running the ball critical. Many experts consider drafting a top quarterback or wide receiver as viable early first round options. I suggest you consider position scarcity and select a running back and possibly even a second one in rounds two and/or three. The WR pool is deep and unless you can grab one of the top four QB’s you are better off grabbing a top RB. I assure you, the starting RB’s will be taken a lot earlier than you’d expect.

I like to grab a few WR’s and then zone in on my QB and TE. The way I look at it is although you draft a base team of sixteen players, along with a few injury slots, you can only play one set of players in the aforementioned positions each week. So even though there are “bye” weeks for each team, you’re still going to play your go-to/top players almost every week. That means you need to focus on filling out your starting team before stacking your bench. Well, at least that’s how I see it. And, every draft takes on a life of its own, so invariably a top player or two falls through the cracks and becomes available later than you expected. If this is the case, grab him. After all it’s only fantasy football.

Quarterbacks: Peyton Manning, Drew Brees, Aaron Rodgers and Matthew Stafford are studs worth taking early. If you wait there are a number of viable options including Matt Ryan, Tony Romo, Nick Foles, Colin Kaepernick, and Russell Wilson. Some reaches to consider are Phil Rivers, Ben Roethlisberger, and Carson Palmer. I’d avoid this year’s rookies. I really don’t have a QB philosophy beyond considering their past accomplishments, team’s offensive philosophy, and their injury history.

Running Backs: There are a handful of studs worth choosing if you have the opportunity to take them in the first round. These include Lesean McCoy, Adrian Peterson, Matt Forte, and Jamaal Charles. I also like up and comers including LeVeon Bell, Montee Ball, Eddie Lacy, and Andre Ellington to step up as future keepers. If possible, I’d steer clear away from injury-prone Adrian Foster, CJ Spiller, and RB’s I consider less than top shelf including Freddie Morris, Gio Bernard, and Ben Tate. Again, consider stocking up on RB’s early because they go fast and you don’t want to be left without at least one top runner.

Wide Receivers: There are a lot to choose from, so have fun with these picks. Beyond the top five of superstars— Demarius Thomas, Calvin Johnson, Dez Bryant, AJ Green, Brandon Marshall, there are numerous options. Alshon Jeffries, Jordy Nelson, Randall Cobb, Keenan Allen, Pierre Garcon, Antonio Brown, and Vincent Jackson should all be on your target list. It seems like every year more than a handful of overlooked WR’s turn into fantasy stars due to a combination of talent and injuries. When looking at “sleepers” consider up and comers C. Patterson, K. Wright, TY Hilton, and even E. Decker. Towards the latter stages of the draft, I like to load up on WR’s, again because the pool is deep and there are many that become stars that are worth keeping for future seasons, if your league offers that option.

Tight Ends: This is a feast or famine position. Unless you can grab J. Graham, J. Thomas, or V. Davis, you are better off waiting. Each NFL team has a different philosophy on deploying this position so you need to do your research to be successful. This is also a position where first year players have a hard time breaking through and getting balls thrown their way.

Defense: Unless you can grab Seattle or San Francisco early, it might be better to wait. I’ve checked a variety of syndicated resources and the other picks are all over the place. I like Denver and New Orleans because both teams have shored up their defenses and have explosive offenses that will keep limit the amount of time their defenses need to spend on the field.

Kickers: Unless you can get New England’s Gostkowski, wait until the very end of the draft. NFL kickers are talented and the majority is serviceable from a fantasy perspective. Try and select a K who plays for a high scoring tem, preferably that plays indoors.

That should get you thinking and hopefully off to a good start. Everyone has his or her preferred strategy and players they like. That’s part of the fun. Keep it light and by do your best. One more tip— try to not get upset over league rules, etc. You may not like every rule, but try to remember that crafting a league charter is not easy.

Are you ready for some fantasy football?

This week’s Guy’s Guys of the Week is Bill Winkenbach, a part owner of the Oakland Raiders. In 1963, he sketched out in a hotel room what has become the template for what is now fantasy football, our cultural phenomenon.

Professional football is a ten billion dollar enterprise. Ever wonder why it’s gotten so popular, and I mean really popular over the past twenty years?

There have been numerous articles written about the game’s relentless rise. Of course a lot of its success has to do with the league’s brilliant marketing. But there are cultural reasons as well for its ascension as football has now surpassed baseball as our national past time. Sounds like fodder for another tasty Guy’s Guy post. So, in no particular order, here is your Guy’s Guys Guide to Pro Football.

1. The game is built for television.

From left to right or right to left, it doesn’t matter. The teams keep moving back and forth across your set. Unlike baseball, the game is played horizontally across your giant 62’’ LED screen, making it easy on the eyes and simple to track along the ten-yard markers. The game is easy to watch and understand the basics, like ten yards for a first down, six points for a touchdown, an extra point or a field goal. Okay, the scoring is a bit more complicated than soccer or hockey, but it’s fairly straightforward stuff. And it’s got lots of hard-hitting, violent collisions which audiences love.

2. Women like football.

Over 50 million women watched the big game. That’s more than the Oscars. Amazing, when you think about it, how bad can it be for women to soak in well-built athletes strutting their stuff in tight uniforms. And the female fan has not gone unnoticed by marketers. They have come out with plenty of cute fashion designs using team logos. Plus the game is fun and full of energy, and frankly it’s not a bad idea to be able to jaw a little football with the guys around the water cooler.

3. The pageantry. The game features an array of constantly changing uniform designs and colors. Every year there is a smattering of new logos, hat designs, color schemes and merchandise all designed for the fans purchasing and wearing pleasure. And it is big business. This year we’ve seen an explosion of baseball style caps embellished with pro football logos. They’re everywhere and I have to admit that they are pretty cool.

4.Fantasy football. Pro football has wisely unlocked and embraced this treasure trove of fan involvement, social media connectivity and ongoing consumer discussion about the brand. Drafting and managing your own team on a weekly basis is fun and challenging. There are now weekly and daily cable and radio shows devoted purely to fantasy football. Oh, did I forget to mention that women now make up over twenty percent of participants in fantasy leagues?

5. Ubiquity. It used to be games were on Sunday at 1pm and 4pm, and viewing was primarily limited to local teams. Now we have pro games every Thursday, three or four every Sunday and the now traditional Monday night tilt. Once we get to December there will be a sprinkling of Saturday games also. That’s a lot of pro football to digest.

Notice that I did not even touch on the highly popular and numerous college football leagues, plus high school and Pee Wee leagues all over this country. Face it, for better or for worse, this country puts a lot of focus on football. Maybe it’s too much of a distraction from all of our real issues and problems or maybe it’s the right tonic to give us all a short break from our stressful modern lives. Every way, it’s probably getting close to kick off time, so thanks for reading.

Is America too crazy for football or is the game a healthy national obsession?

This week’s Guy’s Guy of the Week is Nick Foles; a back up QB in Philadelphia who recently started and threw seven touchdown passes in one game. Hope you had him starting for your fantasy team!