Motorhead Gig – Brixton

Went to see Motorhead at Brixton Academy last night and my ears are still ringing today! Although they were good and I enjoyed it a lot, at times I felt a bit like I’d paid good money to watch an old man wank. I won’t be doing that again, not unless I can get a balcony view – then I might actually be able to see. Why do people who arrive at gigs late think they can move to the front when the main act starts? Baffles me.

It was called the 25-Year Reunion Tour, but Lemmy was the only original member… grounds for a refund maybe? Lemmy is 64 now, and he’s taken up using Grecian 2000 to touch up his roots. My favourite bit was when the drummer left the stage to use the loo! You must know you’re getting old when your drummer wanders off for a wee between songs.

The support act were quite fun too; they had bleached poodle-perm mullets like Def Leppard. Disappointingly, their drummer had both arms though. They had some great heavy metal lyrics too – at one point I swear they sang:

If a wolf could talk
It would squark like pork
I’m a 70s man, out for the hunt
My mother like reptiles
My dad was a cunt
I’ll sit you down on my finger, baby

I didn’t cop off with any heavy metal chicks while I was there because I’m not hairy enough. I’d of liked to have gone round with a pair of scissors and snipped off all the ponytails. Or setting them alight with my zippo lighter. Maybe I’m just bitter.

I did grow my biker moustache back for the gig though, but it was a feeble attempt. It also come in handy on Friday night, when I went to see Demons at the Curzon Cinema in Soho; they had an 80s themed disco with fancy dress.