FRONT PAGE CONTRIBUTOR

Peggy Noonan is sad about her limited shopping opportunities.

A moment last Monday, just after noon, in Manhattan. It’s slightly overcast, not cold, a good day for walking. I’m in the 90s on Fifth heading south, enjoying the broad avenue, the trees, the wide cobblestone walkway that rings Central Park. Suddenly I realize: Something’s odd here. Something’s strange. It’s quiet. I can hear each car go by. The traffic’s not an indistinct roar. The sidewalks aren’t full, as they normally are. It’s like a holiday, but it’s not, it’s the middle of a business day in February. I thought back to two weeks before when a friend and I zoomed down Park Avenue at evening rush hour in what should have been bumper-to-bumper traffic.

This is New York five months into hard times.

She then goes on to list all the shops that are going away, compares Sullenberger to that woman with the octuplets, how we’re all lost and need to get back on track, yadda yadda. Actually, that last bit’s kind of true: we should get back on track. So, just because I’m a nice guy, I’d thought that I’d provide her with a little list:

That pretty much represents the representation of Manhattan Island in government at the Federal level, plus the State governor: and by a happy coincidence, all of them are up for re-election next year, Peggy. So I have a radical notion for you: how about we stop penning bittersweet columns about how lowered our expectations are these days and instead maybe put a couple of ‘em written with the goal of making this list out of date? Even a little out of date would be an improvement, don’t you think?

No?

[shrugging] Suit yourself. I’m just this guy on the Internet, after all. You have absolutely no reason whatsoever to do as I suggest, of course.

But best hurry to that ladies boutique on 84th and Madison: it sounds like it’s going to be the next one on the chopping block.