1) You apply via your LinkedIn profile. Not sure if legacy carrier + the social media brand that was Facebook for old people before Facebook was just for old people is the kind of synergy you want, but maybe?

So, yesterday, The Cod wondered if the Backstreets incident, revealing as it does that Yelp is populated by homophobes with complicated relations to poop, might damage the credibility of a restaurant review site that is the forum for the opinions of anyone with a smartphone and two thumbs. Seems as if Yelp has a bigger problem than just actual cyberharassment of a particular place by gun nuts after the owner called them a bad name. Not only are there weird and bad reviews of Backstreets from other folks, but a visit to our local pub, Nick's, revealed that some disgruntled gun nut Yelpers are not only slamming Backstreets, but also giving positive reviews to other spots in town. Here is a not subtle example. (See screenshot below.) Also, this guy, "Joe B," has been posting positive reviews of every other place nearby, comparing them favorably to Backstreets, as in this review of the Islander:

As an occasional patron of The Islander, I'd say that Joe B. has overstated its virtues considerably. So, if one were attempting to use Yelp to, say, find a place to eat, not only are there the false negative reviews of a place that hurt the feelings of gun nuts, but also false positive reviews of nearby places. TripAdvisor has the same problem. Maybe Eater can hire Gael Greene to cover the Clemson beat so we can get trustworthy reviews?

So it looks like self-proclaimed constitutional scholars are putting reviews of the aforementioned anti-gun burger joint in Clemson, SC about as fast as Yelp can scrub them. Not sure what impact these specious reviews will have on Backstreets, but it does reveal some disturbing truths about Yelp. If the folks flooding Yelp w/ baroque scat freak line cook fantasies were joining Yelp specifically to slander an establishment that would prefer they consume their wings and Bud Lites unarmed, that would be one thing. But! The folks posting the negative reviews of Backstreets seem to be regular Yelpers for the most part. For instance, if one were, say, wondering about brunch spots in Vail, you'd be getting advice on that from "Whaledriving W.," who also shares this tidbit from Backstreets:

Per yesterday's post, Yelp has scrubbed most of the reviews from gun nuts of Backstreets, a nondescript college bar in Clemson, SC, with a proprietor w/ the temerity to call gun owners "douchebags." As it happens, the Cod nurtured a Yelp person at his day job, but not sure if that connection led to the scrub.

1) Stand by for the predictable gnashing of teeth about "freedom of speech."

2) "Concealed Weapons," by a late and non-Wolf iteration of J. Geils, is a terrible song. And sexist. Come to think of it, "Centerfold" is iffy that way, too. It would be better if it were "My blood runs cold, because my angel is a centerfold, and I am proud of her, and support her decisions."

It's rare that there is a national food-related story coming out of the very town where The Cod's corporeal host does his day job. But! South Carolina passed a law permitting patrons to bring guns into bars and restaurants, (provided they do not drink) but allowed individual establishments to opt out. So the proprietor of one of the many college bars in Clemson, SC posted the sign at left.

1) The food at Backstreets is fine. It is pretty much like any other flatscreens and pool tables college bar establishment you've been to. Now and again, they get a little bit ambitious w/ their lunch special.

2) Can a restaurant be cyber-bullied? If so, this one sure is.

3) Related: Many of the Yelpers seem to feel that the worst thing they can say about Backstreets is that it caters to gays.* There are probably some folks in town who would welcome a local alternative to The Woodshed, but if they do have a glory hole, they've added it since the last time I ate there.

4) This is a terrible law. I mean, for the obvious reasons that nobody has ever been in a bar in SC and thought, "geez, some guns would make this a better environment." But also, it puts bar and restaurant owners in a terrible position. This law does not just cover wing spots in college towns, but also serious restaurants, including those in Greenville, (John Mariani's favorite restaurant town), and Charleston (which has reached the point where the local paper gets huffy when no CHS chef gets shortlisted for Best Chef). It's not hard to imagine that some folks -- The Cod included -- would be more comfortable eating in an establishment with unarmed patrons. It would not be hard for patrons to ask if a place allowed weapons when making a reservation, and then book a table at a place with a no guns rule. But if the person calling your restaurant happens to be a gun nut, then you lose their business for banning guns, and invite a Yelp-driven shitstorm. Indeed if I were a talented restaurateur considering a new venture, I might look somewhere besides a state where I have to tussle with a gun shibboleth. Gov. Haley talks a lot about promoting business in the state. It's a shame that she didn't consider that kowtowing to gun nuts would make opening a restaurant in South Carolina an untenable proposition.

*Nick's is probably a better bet for your gay-friendly Clemson college bar experience.

Yes, yes, indeed, it has been a long time since the Cod rapped at you here, in the TL;DR place, intstead of on the Twitters. But! For one thing, nobody reads or writes food blogs anymore, esp not now that Eater hired all of the restaurant critics. For another thing, any and all future meals I write about will all be at The Pig, in Chapel Hill, NC, where I enjoyed three exceptional lunches this weekend. The Cod will be taking all future meals there, until he is ejected, or dies of gout. Spencer put me on to the brisket, and I returned for pastrami and Vietnamese pork cheek. I die. Even brought some of their hotdogs home.

But! I digress. Guiteau Monday seems to be the only thing that gets this blog party started these days, which is a shame, but something like this makes it impossible not to:

"Brussels sprouts so good you'll... never mind, you already did." What else did you expect on a rainy March Guiteau Monday?