experience

Although we were strongly encouraged to go to bed after dinner, knowing what lay ahead, most of us hadn’t managed to sleep.

Perhaps it was the temperature, or the timing, or the sheer excitement.

I had barely got my mitts on, and was still adjusting my poles to the proper length, before we were off.

‘Duende!’

(‘Let’s go!’ in Swahili)

One by one, step by step, in single file line, we began our final summit night ascent up Kilimanjaro.

I looked up from the path and the carefully trodden footprints to the women in line ahead of me, and to all of the guides on either side of us – with two more than normal there were seven altogether – and I felt both proud and protected.

‘One team, one dream!’ Hemedi, one of our main guides, had declared our first night together. And it had quickly become our slogan, our proclamation, our lifeline.

We were one team – and a powerful force at that – with one dream… to make it to the summit.

We continued to climb, but it somehow felt more serious, more somber than before.

Six days earlier we’d begun our climb up Africa’s largest peak.

We’d conquered rain and snow, the famous Barranco wall, and even Lava Tower – our day 3 destination – who’s high altitude had affected the majority of our group leaving many ill and worried they wouldn’t be able to go on.

Although at times challenging, and despite long days of nine plus hours of hiking, I never doubted my ability to get to the top.

And although physical fitness doesn’t guarantee one won’t be affected by altitude sickness, l was still pretty confident I’d be able to make it happen.

Until I wasn’t.

Just then I began to feel it.

Not only were my hands freezing, my tummy was turning. And then came the gurgles.

I began to feel it. The altitude.

It was hours before our first short break.

And not a moment too soon.

Even then, there was no time to dawdle. It was hurry up and do your business if you must, grab some water, and get back in line.

(Although I certainly felt better afterwards, having to do your business on the side of the mountain, where it was very difficult not to be exposed somehow, and in the middle of the night when the last thing you feel like doing is taking off all of your layers, is not so much fun let me tell you!)

By the time I was back, we were immediately off again in our single file line.

There was no singing, no laughing, no bubbly conversation as there had been the days previously.

‘This isn’t fun anymore!’ someone from our group proclaimed.

My heart sank. I’m sure she wasn’t the only one feeling that way. In fact, I’m pretty sure we were all beginning to feel that way.

Perhaps I’m making it out to be a bit more somber than it actually was. I mean it wasn’t all that awful – at least at first – but it was also no walk in the park.

At first, I was quite enjoying the rhythm of our steps.

I was enjoying the quiet. The nature. The team we were a part of.

I was beginning to realize we were now on a mission that became bigger than any one of us.

But after a few hours, the first in line peeled off. And then the next one. And the one two behind me.

I was also beginning to realize we may not all make it.

As a team leader that’s tough. And when you’re not allowed to get out of line yourself to check in on your people, and when you yourself aren’t feeling so hot, it makes it even harder.

I began to recite a mantra in my mind:

'we will summit,we will summit,and we’ll be,warm again.’

It had a distinct rhythm and tune. And I must have recited it several hundred times before we finally made it to the crater rim of the mountain, Stella point.

And by that point, my stomach had settled a little bit. We had been going for almost 8 hours.

The next 45 minutes of the climb, also the last 45 minutes of the climb, although not overly physically demanding, lasted an eternity.

However as the sun slowly began to offer its morning light, I felt hopeful.

My fear that I may not make it, which was pretty real at some point during the ascent, subsided. It was happening.

It was freezing, we were freezing, and a few brave members of the group – who had declared more than once they were ready to turn back, and who had been persuaded more than once to keep going – were barely hanging on.

It was no longer about me making it to the top, and more about making sure all those still with us would make it.

I knew this sign had better show up sooner rather than later!

We began to pass fellow climbers coming in the opposite direction, big grins on their faces (or occasionally very white in their faces!) heading down the mountain.

‘Congratulations!’ they shouted. And I knew we were close.

And then off in the near distance I saw her.

The sign.

The official post that marked the summit.

We began to quicken our steps.

And suddenly, there we were.

We made it.

We had reached the peak, summited to the summit, achieved our goal.

So we took the picture, dug deep to smile big, and then just like that, the moment was over and were already on our way down.

Blink and you could’ve missed it.

And if I’m honest, it was almost a bit anticlimactic.

Now in all fairness it was snowing and very cloudy and there was no beautiful sunrise to be seen. Perhaps that would have made a difference.

But still, this big summit reaching moment wasn’t what I thought it would be.

And as I began the descent back down, I realized although we may have made it to the summit, it wasn’t about making it to the summit at all.

It really is about the experience, the journey, the steps you have to go through in life order to get to where you want to go, and more importantly the person you have to become in the process.

And that was certainly the case for our climb up Kilimanjaro.

The actual moment of reaching the summit paled in comparison to all of the special moments we enjoyed leading up to it.

The singing and dancing and cheering we did with all of our guides and porters at camp.

The deep discussions we’d get into in our dining tent on life, love and diamox (to take, or not to take?)

The sharing of our roses and thorns at the end of every evening, which ended in laughter or tears or powerful breakthroughs.

Hard to believe this epic experience of a lifetime has come to an end. But the learnings and the connections are only just beginning.

And these special moments will truly last a lifetime.

And I am so freakin’ proud of what our ‘one team, one dream’ accomplished.

So although I will continue to set goals and climb mountains and may evenattempt to once again reach the summit – and hope you do too – I’m going to focus on enjoying the journey (hopefully with less gurgles next time!)

“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that maters, in the end.” ~ Ursula K. Le Guin

I always love the beginning of a new month, as it’s an opportunity to start fresh, to set new goals, to give yourself a clean slate.

Although as of late, I’m beginning to think it doesn’t always have to be about achieving the actual goal, the end game, the outcome.

I’m starting to realise it really is about the process, the journey, the experience.

As I’m typing to you, I’m watching the world pass me by, en route by train (I love train travel!) to Montreal, to do a full-day intensive with my speaking coach.

We’re refining my keynote about what it means to live big, and one of the ideas we’re playing with is the fact it’s not just about getting out of your comfort zone,it’s about getting into your experience zone.

There’s a reason why experiential learning and experiential leadership development has grown significantly in the past decade.

There’s a reason why experiential gifts are the new big thing.

And there’s a reason why certain moments, events, and experiences in our life create the lasting impression they do.

The majority of people spend their lives wanting MORE – wanting to do more, make more, achieve more. And as a result, we often get too caught up in the outcome, what we’re chasing. And in so doing we miss the point entirely!

The solution?

Get into your experience zone!

What do I mean by that, you may be wondering?

You see, I’m working on a new model and framework. It’s a work in progress, however as it stands, here are the elements that make up your experience zone:

ACTION: We can’t think our way into doing. We spend way too much time thinking, waiting, analysing… we have to actually take ACTION!

EMOTION: Not only does it require certain emotions to get into the zone (fear and courage being two!) an emotional connection also needs to be made.

NOVELTY: Part of what makes an experience memorable is that it’s new, we areliving it for the first time. And there may likely be an element of surprise and delight.

PRESENCE: The experience has to happen in real-time, and if you are not fully present for the experience, it won’t be nearly as powerful.

INSIGHT: As a result of whatever it is you are doing, there has to be some learning, some new stroke of insight. Maybe you learned something new about yourself, about what was possible, or about what matters in the world.

When you’re in your experience zone…

The goal IS the experience!

There is no right or wrong, no possibility for failure, no mistakes to be made.

You are already winning… because you are stretching yourself beyond what you thought possible.

We spend so much of our time thinking our way into action, into belief, into confidence. When in fact, the only way we grow is in the DOING.

Courage is contagious. And when we spend more time in our experience zone building our courage muscle, we’re also building momentum, belief, and confidence. And then what becomes possible in all areas of our lives, well, just wait and see!

And the good news, experiences don’t just refer to activities like bungee jumping, axe throwing, or skydiving.

They can also include introducing yourself to a stranger, getting up 30 minutes earlier than normal, or finding a new way to work. Or maybe it’s time to cheat on your job, and sign up to learn a new sport or activity you’ve always wanted to learn!

So, what will you do to get into your experience zone today?

I want to hear from you in the comments below.

Have a FAB week!

P.S. If you’re ready to get into your experience zone, but not sure where to start, let’s book a call! I have a powerful Living BIG Experience day where we will ENSURE you get into your experience zone, and break through whatever may be holding you back!

Every day, every event, every moment can be an experience. We don’t necessarily have to wait for our next big trip or our next big event to have one.

Here are 3 ideas to do just that.

Adopt a child-like curiosity.

Children are constantly excited and insatiably curious. They observe everything around them. They ask questions. They want to learn. And they freely express themselves in an innocently authentic manner.

Whenever I am in a new city, I love exploring as much of it as possible. And Louisville was no exception! It had far more to offer than I realized. Rich in history, I enjoyed walking the streets, running along the waterfront, and taking an embarrassing amount of selfies (I used to try to hide it… now I’m shameless about my secret obsession with them!) in front of landmarks and random scenes.

Perhaps easier to do when you are a tourist, yes, however couldn’t you also take on the tourist mindset in your own town? Take a new route to work. Discover new interesting places. Observe the sights around you as though it were your first time seeing them. Smile at strangers. Meet new people. Make new friends. Being curious makes for an experience.

Celebrate even without a celebration.

It’s fun to sometimes celebrate just ‘cause. Indulge in an ice cream. Be crazy and make it a double scoop. Get up and dance even if there isn’t a dance floor. Break out the china for a random Tuesday evening meal.

There are numerous reasons to celebrate every day if you choose to see them.

Now I love being around people, however one of my favourite evenings this week was when I took myself out on a date to the fancy Brown Hotel. I ordered their infamous ‘Hot Brown’ (created in that very hotel in 1926 ~an open-faced turkey and bacon sandwich swimming in Mornay sauce, and then baked until the bread is perfectly crisp and the sauce begins to brown. It turns out is has 53 ingredients in all!) I decided to celebrate, ordered a glass of bubbly, and made it an experience. Heck, I even had an ‘old fashioned’, seeing as how I was in the land of Bourbon and all!

Don’t wait for a celebration before celebrating. Every moment is worth celebrating, isn’t it? And celebration makes for an experience.

When you get the chance to ‘Howl at the Moon’, do it.

In the end, it really is about the moments that matter most. And making moments is easier than you think! So when an opportunity to create a moment presents itself, take it.

I met some lovely folks (I met many, as it turns out!) at the Summit, who very graciously invited me to join them at a Dueling Piano bar called ‘Howl at the Moon.’ I was hesitant at first. Would that make me look less professional? Should I not be prepping for my presentation? What if I can’t help but want to dance?

And then I thought, when am I going to have another opportunity to bond with some lovely ladies, listen to talented musicians while dueling pianos, and go to town on the dance floor? And so I gave into the moment. And I’m so glad I did.

I think we can create more of these types of moments, if we choose to, every day. And moments are what makes an experience.

Whenever I’m on holiday, or visiting a new city, I tend to be curious, celebrate, and relish in the moments more. And yes, this makes for great experiences. And it got me thinking – why do I have to be on vacation mode to do this?!? Perhaps I don’t.

Every day, every moment is an opportunity for an experience, if you choose to make it so. Click to tweet it out!

Have a FAB week!

Now I want to hear from YOU! What are your thoughts when it comes to creating experiences? I’d love to hear your comments below.