As a liberal Northerner, I have some preconceived beliefs about the South. When I started looking at them, I realized I needed to bring all of the ugliness into the Light if I was to be happy there. It was uncomfortable work. I know enough about belief and selective perception that this work will be ongoing—to be mindful of looking for evidence that supports what I already believe and ignoring evidence to the contrary. I want to be open to the beauty, the charm, the kindness and good manners of Oklahoma. I want to love it there.

What a good idea, what a great idea, your realization is beginning the process, the uncomfortable honesty — that shakes up our contempt prior to investigation, our stuck ideas . Yay! And opens us up to more of the world. I’ve been looking for deeper non-combative questions to Ask the PeopleWithBadIdeas, etc. and invite them to ask of me, too. Since my intent begins with acknowledging and then being curious against my preconceptions, the other person responds …..Wait a minute. Have I actually done this or am I imagining how it will/should be when I do this.. ?

Oklahoma is the South, but it is also the Midwest and Indian territory. I was fortunate when I moved here, to know an older gentleman who brought me books to read so that I could understand better, this area of Oklahoma that I lived in. I realized I had not been taught anything at all up North, about Native Americans. I knew nothing about Oklahoma history. You are wise to ask yourself questions and to explore the area you will be settling in. It is very different in Muskogee than it is here in the southwestern part of the state. These are good, down to earth people who take care of each other. Coming to Oklahoma was life changing for me. I am a better Okie than I ever was a Nebraska girl. This is my home, and I love being both nature girl and bad-ass.

You are both wise and brave, Sandy. You’ve recognized that you have some prejudices (don’t we all?!), and in my mind that’s the first step towards combatting them. I know you are up to the challenge and have a good feeling about your new chapter. Adventure awaits!

I do like it. I have a great place to live, which means everything. It is hot, which would be fine except for the humidity, which makes my head explode. But Iowa summers have a *few* days like that, so I’m acclimatizing.