I don’t know if I mentioned this before but I just recently saw my Senior DI at a club; a gay club! I remember a while ago a DI from the same company different platoon was touring my squadron and came into my shop. I recgonized him so we started talking about boot and he mentioned my senior, saying “we always thought he was soft, a little gay”. My senior would smile a lot and wasn’t very aggressive. He was on top of his shit but always seemed a little soft for sure. I never suspected he was gay while in boot camp but in hindsight all the signs were there! He was attractive but unfortunately not really my type.

I approached him in the club and he remembered me, which was cool. Of course my first question was “who was your favorite recruit?” and he named the usual stud muffins: the tall, thick, muscular, masculine mid western guys!! He said he thought our guide was an idiot- thank god the DIs were on the same page with the rest of the platoon!! We chatted a bit and exchanged numbers. I saw him once or twice more but never really connected further. I suspect he’s out of the Corps now, and if not, most likely a 1st Sgt. now.

Just goes to show gay Marines are everywhere, in all corridors of the Corps.

**Boot Camp and MCT are still my best memories from my time in. Nothing quite compares to the sights, sounds, and smells of those initial 5 months. What are some of your most poignant memories from boot camp?! I’ve got MILLIONS I could share. Share yours!**

Derek Dooley, the ‘Volunteers’ new coach, is a hottie…I know he may not be your typical stud but I have a soft spot for guys like this. I remember when I was in 5th grade I was in the Cub Scouts. We had our annual Scout camping trip at Mission Bay in San Diego. After swimming at the beach all day our troop leader herded all us pre-pubescent boys to the public shower on the camp ground. Of course, it was your typical locker room shower—a large room with shower heads along the wall. This was probably the first time any of us boys were to shower in front of each other, let alone a full grown man. He was a tall, southern, muscular guy with a broad hairy chest. I remember it well!! This was the first man I saw naked and I’m convinced my daddy issues trace back to that shower scene!! I could NOT take my eyes off of him. He was a gorgeous dad. He showered with all us boys every night that week, making sure every one of us dutifully scrubbed all the appropriate areas. Indeed my favorite week of childhood…

I’ve been away a long time but I’ve decided to come back. There’s been quite a few developments in my ‘case’. I met a guy who turned out to be in a relationship. Long story short; his partner is out for revenge and decided to share my secret with my command. The last few months have been a roller coaster. I’ll let you know what’s happened so far…shortly

I was basically caught in the act by a buddy of mine. A Marine. I was in my bedroom with *another Marine doing my civic duty when a friend of mine-a straight one- started pounding on my door. Why? I don’t know! So what did I do? I ignored the pounding and continued with what I was doing. I figured the idiot at the door would leave but that didn’t happen. Anyway, I’m laying on my back with a 6ft 2 stud inside me when my door creeps open! Yes…Im laying naked with another guy on top of me, naked himself, and my buddy walks in. The look on his face was beyond classic. Speechless he was!!! But interestigly he didn’t overreact but instead said “wow I’ll leave you two alone for a bit”! At this point I really didn’t know what to do and I was close anyways so after he left me and Bryan (my top) finished what we were doing. We cleaned up quick and he left in a hurry. I called my straight intruder friend up and he came to my room. He told me he was pretty shocked at what he just saw but had doubts about my masculnity for several months. Me and him have been pretty close for some time now so it’s no surprise he was catching on to my secret. He said he was cool with the idea of gay guys because he grew up in a liberal area of manhattan. He worked at Equinox in Times square so he saw gays everyday. Not to mention gays have been bleeding over from neighboring Chelsea into Hells Kitchens for years. He was, for me, the perfect Marine to catch me in a gay act! We discussed what just happen for several hours, while I endured intense questioning. At some point he seemed a little too interested but I’m only dreaming of course!

But in the end he was super cool about the situation and I felt good knowing I could trust someone with my secret. Not all Marines are bigot homophobes.

Gosh, I get alot of “Hate Mail”! It’s a shame we live in a world where bigotry still runs rampant! I guess if I’m putting my life out there, there’s bound to be people who dont agree with it and thats all fine and good. With my vandalized barracks door and the excessive hate mail lately, I’m really doing great! ;-) A few people pointed out that I wasnt a “real Marine”. I guess graduating the same boot camp as you doesnt count? Or the 300 PFT? Not even the 1st Swim Class huh?! What’s a boy to do. I work my ass off to excel physically and mentally at my job but just because I’m gay means im not good enough? Look around “honey”, there’s gays EVERYWHERE and your just ignorant to the fact. For any of you straight military folks reading, take a look at your NCO or your Gunny, next time you have formation think about the Captain standing in front of the formation! Some of them are gay, I can guarantee it, and they’re probably checkin’ out your ass when you walk away!!

I met a gay sailor at a bar a while back who said there was a whole underground “network” of military gays in San Diego. From e-1 all the way 0-7 (the he knows of). They represent…haha…Now that I’m back in the city I want to get more involved. I need to make me a few friends of the same persuasion.

Anyhow, speaking of my recent troubles, tell me about your experience as a gay service member. Were you ever discovered, how did you live a double life?! Comment please, it’ll make me feel better knowing theres others who weathered the storm…

Summer has come and gone (for me at least). I took 2 weeks of leave as well as a few weeks of PTAD in Virginia. I had an amazing time off only to come back to San Diego and a load of problems…my barracks room had flooded while I was away and quite a few of my things have been ruined…no one took the liberty to tell me this when it happened?! Apparently someone saw me in hillcrest (another marine) with a guy and proceeded to spread homosexual rumors about me around the squadron. My barracks room door was vandalized as a result of this (with the word FAG etched in the metal)! I had to answer questions from my superiors as to why someone would write this on my door! On top of all that my sexual Marine buddy has been shipped off overseas, most likely to Afghanistan. Of course I am most bummed about this…he really kept me going, literally!!!

I can only imagine what will come of the gay rumors floating around..I have met a few guys who went through hell when their secrets got out. Lets hope that doesn’t happen to me. Well, I suppose I’m happy to be back in town but I’m a little worried where things are going. It’s off to the shower and bed for now. I hope to write every day from now on as my life is about to get interesting.

It’s been a whirlwind last couple of weeks. I have been super busy and I apologize to everyone for not updating sooner!!! I was doing some training on the East Coast and didn’t have access to a private computer. The only laptop available was shared by a bunch of people, so I felt it safe to stay away from this blog (you never know whose watching). I had a week off after that, which I spent in Virginia visiting some friends (straight friends). I’m now in the airport in DC waiting for my flight to arrive (which has already been delayed 2 hours). I’ll by flying to NYC, then to Denver, and into San Diego.

I never realized how hot a man can look in a black suit carrying a briefcase. They are everywhere here in DC! Would that be considered a fetish?! How I’d love to head to a bathroom some where and have some fun with one of these suits: but the recent ordeal with that one Senator comes to mind, so I’m over that.. :-)

The wireless connection is really spotty where I’m sitting, so I’m going to keep this short. Basically, I’m BACK! I haven’t died or anything…I’ll try and post in NYC or Denver (if I have a layover in one of those cities). I have alot to tell…