Focused Genesishttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com
Focused on Beauty, Books, Fashion, and ConfidenceFri, 18 Aug 2017 03:03:26 +0000enhourly1http://wordpress.com/https://s2.wp.com/i/buttonw-com.pngFocused Genesishttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com
We Need to Have a Different Kind of Conversationhttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/17/we-need-to-have-a-different-kind-of-conversation/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/17/we-need-to-have-a-different-kind-of-conversation/#respondThu, 17 Aug 2017 17:27:22 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=625]]>I normally try to stay away from political topics on this blog and try to keep things positive but in light of recent events I can’t stand by without saying anything about it.

If you don’t know, recently in Charlottesville, VA, there was a rally of extreme white supremacists marching through the town carrying torches, nazi flags, and beating up anyone who got in their way.

As both a black person and a person of German decent I can’t even describe how upsetting this was to see. And do you know what the cops did? Ignored it. And what did our “president” do? He sided with them because he was afraid of losing the white supremacist vote he worked so hard to get. I ignored it at first because I didn’t want to acknowledge that this happened.

The march in Virginia, and every incident before and after, was something of pure hate and the reason why? Because we’re different from them. Because our skin is darker. When in reality they should be thanking us. This country was built off of the back of black people. Slaves, soldiers on the front lines, civil rights, it was all us.

My heart ached knowing we were brought back to the 1950s where people of color lived in fear of white people, unsure of who to trust and white people were angry at us just because of the color of our skin. I can’t even wonder how afraid the black elders of America, who lived through the civil rights movement, felt seeing that America was brought back in time in a mere night. Or how Germans and Jews, who lived through the holocaust, felt seeing those swastika flags being carried with pride felt.

What kills me even more is the fact that most of America is more outraged by black athletes kneeling during the national anthem. And why? For most it’s because those athletes aren’t supporting the country they live in. Do they really have a reason to support America?

Blacks have been the target of hate ever since our toes touched American soil. We have been sold as slaves. We have been whipped, hanged, and killed in the most brutal way because of the color of our skin. Black women have been raped by white slave masters because of the fact that their wives couldn’t bare children. Black women gave birth in fear because they knew their children would be taken away and sold to another white family miles away from them.

In 2017, THE SAME EXACT THING IS HAPPENING. Black people have been killed by men that were trained to PROTECT US because of the color of their skin and their deaths were labeled as suicides and accidents. The killers were given paid suspensions(basically vacations) and walked away from their murders as if nothing happened, as if there was no blood on their hands, as if they didn’t destroy families and futures because of their actions.

The year is 2017, not 1955, and we as a country need to act like it. Don’t think because the media has swept the murders of Sandra Bland, Eric Garner, Trayvon Martin, Philando Castile, and Micheal Brown under the rug that we have forgotten. Their murders our burned in the back of our brains like brands. This incident in Virginia will not be forgotten.

We can not go backward. I cannot wake up every morning and go to sleep every night afraid for the state of our country.

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/17/we-need-to-have-a-different-kind-of-conversation/feed/0720px-Fist.svgajbanks077tumblr_n3li4uWqqd1r5yaewo1_50011995996-Texte-blanc-de-la-mode-du-diamant-avec-un-fond-noir-Banque-d'imagesFashion Favorites: Trends I’m Glad To See and Trends I Wish Would Leave [SUMMER 2017]https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/07/fashion-favorites-trends-im-glad-to-see-and-trends-i-wish-would-leave-summer-2017/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/07/fashion-favorites-trends-im-glad-to-see-and-trends-i-wish-would-leave-summer-2017/#commentsMon, 07 Aug 2017 00:05:49 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=560]]>Summer is finally coming to a close and fall is almost here. Judge me if you want but the moment I felt the New Jersey weather drop ten degrees I was ready for pumpkin spice lattes and horror movie nights.

Since the summer months are coming to a close I wanted to go through a few trends I’ve seen come through and some that just burst past the fashion police while they were asking for license and registration.

STRIPES

I know it’s surprising for a girl with my size to like stripes but I love them! While it is true that stripes can make you look wider, that’s only because of the style. Find the stripe pattern that works for your shape and you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

I personally love that certain trends are coming back into style like elephant bottoms and high top converses but khaki pants are the one thing I can’t stand to have in my closet. I have khaki denim but that’s as far as I’ll go. I don’t know why but I’m instantly taken back to high school where khaki pants were one of the very few pant colors we were allowed to chose from in our uniform attire.

A bold anything can help make an outfit a million times look better. You have an all white outfit out fit? Throw on a bright pink sweater or grab a yellow bag. Adding bright colors to a minimalist look can add a whole new range of styling possibilities.

I don’t know who decided vinyl outfits were a good idea but I regret that decision for them. How on earth do you rock vinyl during the summer? Do you not feel sweaty and gross? What happens to the vinyl when it’s hot and muggy outside? How do you wash it? I have so many questions. I just have so many questions.

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/08/07/fashion-favorites-trends-im-glad-to-see-and-trends-i-wish-would-leave-summer-2017/feed/111995996-Texte-blanc-de-la-mode-du-diamant-avec-un-fond-noir-Banque-d'imagesajbanks077tenor1857034_Caramel00104678-0100093837-0100054657-05il_340x270.1036803955_pqh8tumblr_n46y5mNPv91scogabo1_50011033094_hi10981123_hi10871236_hithe-help-503f7a61a4111The Help: The Book Vs. The Moviehttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/30/the-help-the-book-vs-the-movie/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/30/the-help-the-book-vs-the-movie/#commentsSun, 30 Jul 2017 23:39:38 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=545]]>I know I owe you guys two book reviews. Here’s one but in a little bit of a different form than usual.

If you haven’t noticed there’s a big difference when a book gets adapted to a movie. There area lot of scenes that get cut and never make the final cut, characters are changed and sometimes removed from the narrative entirely and of course the script is changed.

I recently read The Help by Kathryn Stockett and realize there’s another mistake that’s made when books are adapted to movies. Some lose their entire meaning when adapted into movies.

While The Help as a movie was claimed as a phenomenal movie that looked at segregation in Jackson, Mississippi through the eyes of the help and how one woman was determined to open the eyes of her “happy” little town to racism and the problems lives lost because of it. It sounds like a pretty good movie. Here’s the thing…the movie has the basic plot line of “the great white hope.” What is the the great white hope?

It’s actually a Broadway play that dealt with issues on racism that debuted in the 1960s but is used today to describe a white character needing to help black people get out of their Stockholm syndrome like oppression that they just can’t seem to get away from unless that lone white person helped them.

Look at every movie dealing with slavery or segregation from the time black people were brought to America to modern day slavery ( yes that is a thing) that had a white person “determined to save black people” either from themselves or the white people holding deep prejudice against black people for their skin color. The Blind Side is a great example of the great white hope.

How does The Help fit into the plot line? The maids Aibileen and Minny are the “mammies” or the black folks who don’t even look like they want to try and get out of their oppression. Eugenia a.k.a Skeeter is the savior that opens their eyes and helps them rise above their situation.

The book is not like this at all.

In the book Eugenia is actually the one who needs help. Naive can’t even describe this girl. It’s almost like she has no idea that racism exist because she lived such a sheltered life. After she’s exposed she wants to expose those around her through her writing.

Aibileen and Minny were smart. They knew exactly what would happen if they were found having interviews about the women they worked for with a white woman in their house. They’d lose their jobs, go to jail or they’d be dead.

In the book, white women in Mississippi were seen as the ones with the power. Let one black maid piss of her boss and she’d never find a job in Jackson again.

No, white womans like to keep they hands clean. They got a shiny little set a tools they use, sharp as witches fingernails, tidy and laid out neat, like the picks on a dentist tray. They gone take they time with them. (14.63)

In fact there’s a scene in the book that’s a turning point for the maids when one of their own is sent to jail because she pissed off the almighty, Hilly Hollbrook.

The maids had to give Skeeter a list of rules to follow if this book was ever going to get written. Skeeter had no clue why she had to follow these rules because racism never broke through her sheltered bubble.

If you decide to pick up this book read her essay in the back first. Stockett makes a clear indication that she is not trying to say that she knows how black women felt in the 1960s in Jackson Mississippi. She understands that there is no way a white woman could ever understand what black women went through. While the work is clearly fiction she wrote the book from what she knew.

Read this book with no expectations or prejudices. I remember not wanting to read this book at all just because I thought it was just another white author pretending to know a black voice.

I’m not giving the book high praise. I’m not ignoring the stereotypes that are portrayed in the book. This is what I’m saying: The movie is a watered down, beyond stereotyped version of what the book was.

Thank you for making Girls Trip the fabulous movie that it is. Thank you for showing the world the true essence of so many black women. So many women found themselves in your characters which is something that is hardly seen in Hollywood movies about black women.

Thank you for showing the world that black women struggle. Thank you for showing the world black women things that they need to work through and sometimes those things become unbearable without your girls around you.

Girls Trip inspires and creates a safe space for black women to open up.

I almost started crying when I saw all of your smiles that were so true and genuine. You’ve taught so many lessons through this movie. You brought the importance of bringing the black women together to the forefront of Hollywood.

You taught me to strive for success and my own version of happiness. You taught me that it is never too late to take a chance. You taught me that if something isn’t right then it is time to let it go.

Thank you for bringing a moving celebrating black women coming together into Hollywood. Thank you for giving inspiration. Thank you for giving black women all around the world a chance to come together.

Anxiety makes you wish your life would end

Anxiety makes you wonder that maybe if you were dead then maybe you wouldn’t have to deal with anxiety

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/22/anxiety/feed/0635913352645302096190402489_tumblr_mqomwx7fSe1r3dkhxo1_500ajbanks0775 Makeup Brands That Are Cruelty-Free!https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/17/5-makeup-brands-that-are-100-vegan/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/17/5-makeup-brands-that-are-100-vegan/#respondMon, 17 Jul 2017 00:11:42 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=476]]>If you follow beauty news you’ll know that NARS, one of the best and most affordable makeup brands out there, decided that they were going to extend their business to China. While that’s great for beauty lovers in China it isn’t so great for the animals or the company’s image either. All beauty brands that choose to sell their products in China must forfeit their claim to be cruelty free. This means NARS will be using animals to test their products in China.

You might be asking well it’s not happening here why should I care. If that’s the case you really need to re-evaluate your life choices because we’re talking about thousands of animals to deal with harmful chemicals that could kill them.

Despite the fact that NARS has received some serious negative backlash from their decision they are still considering going through with expanding their product line to China. If you love both beauty and animals and are deciding to switch makeup brands but don’t want to lose the affordable prices NARS has to offer then take a look at this list of beauty brands that are cruelty-free:

How can you do a list of vegan makeup brands without mentioning Kat Von D? She’s a huge supporter of cruelty-free beauty products. While her beauty line is a little bit expensive at times she makes up for in quality. I personally own her Ever Lasting Liquid Lipsticks in Lolita and Damned and let me tell you those two products alone are heaven sent I can’t imagine what the rest of her line is like. While not all of her products are cruelty free at the moment she is working on getting her entire line to be 100% vegan. She also has a section (#VEGANALERT) in her online store that lists all of the products that are currently cruelty-free.

Black Radiance is one of the most affordable brands out there. You can find their products at any drugstore or target for as low as $3.99. Just because it’s labeled as a “drugstore brand” doesn’t mean the quality is bad. Youtube Beauty Guru Jackie Aina has vouched for this brand over and over again. When Aunt Jackie vouches for a brand you know it’s good. Oh and I almost forgot to mention, this is a black owned brand that caters to people of color.

You’ve probably heard about them recently since they’ve partnered with Lisa Frank. They only have brushes out right now but they will have more Lisa Frank items out soon. When I tell you this stuff is cheap….it’s cheap. The most expensive thing I’ve seen on their website is $5.99 and again I have to say just because it’s less than $20.00 doesn’t mean the quality equals the price. The most important thing is that everything is 100% vegan.

Lime Crime is another brand that’s a little more on the pricey side but the quality is worth it. You want to look like a mermaid? Lime Crime has a whole entire line of products inspired by mermaids. And the best part? The company is completely cruelty-free and vegan friendly.

Last but not least, I have to put Milani Cosmetics on the list. Their lip creams are out of this world, I use to have a waterproof liquid eyeliner that lived up to its name and it was only $8.00. Milani lives up to the hype and the fact that it’s cruelty-free is even better.

I hope this helps some of you beauty lovers out their that decide to turn away from NARS. There are affordable brands out there other than NARS that are cruelty-free. You just gotta look for them.

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/07/17/5-makeup-brands-that-are-100-vegan/feed/0makeup-GettyImages-74867297ajbanks077In Response: Women Over 200 Pounds Can Wear Whatever the F*ck They Wanthttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/21/in-response-women-over-200-pounds-can-wear-whatever-the-fck-they-want/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/21/in-response-women-over-200-pounds-can-wear-whatever-the-fck-they-want/#respondWed, 21 Jun 2017 00:49:25 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=451]]>It’s summer time and for bigger people we are often told we should hide every part of our body or just “save everyone the embarrassment” and stay inside. I’ve been seeing post after post of girls that are no bigger than a size 2 bullying people who are bigger than them and telling them to cover up. Let me give you a simple response. It ain’t happenin’! It’s hot and we’re allowed to feel just as cute as you do when we have a tank top on!

It pisses me off to no end how skinny people think that bigger people over 200 pounds shouldn’t have confidence. Apparently we have “rules” we need to follow if we plan to survive the summer with the “little bit of self esteem we do have.” Who are you to say what a person can and can’t wear based on their weight? So In Response: Dear skinny people, we will wear whatever the f*ck we want.

If we want to wear patterns, we will wear we will wear patterns.

Most of my life I’ve been told I shouldn’t wear patterns of any kind, especially stripes because I’d look fatter. Patterns of any sort became a huge no-no. The only color I should wear are different shades of black and grey because they’re “slimming.”Instead of accentuating my curves I hid them because that’s what people told me to do. I never thought patterns would make me look like anything else except fat. Horizontal lines, zig-zag, polka dots, any patterns in general are not exclusively for skinny people. You just have to find the right pattern that works for your curves.

If we want to show our arms and legs, we will show our arms and legs.

Shorts have never been a problem for me because I’ve always liked my leg proportions but for others in the plus size range it’s not easy. It’s hot as hell outside. Curvy people shouldn’t have to wear jeans and pants in 90 degree weather just because thinner people have some strange fear of seeing fat on another person.

Dear Women (and men) over 200 pounds, fashion is not exclusively for people that are skinnier than us. By all means wear what makes you feel good. Fashion is a form of expression. Fashion does not have rules. Express yourself how you want to and don’t let anyone stop you from feeling good about your fashion choices.

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/21/in-response-women-over-200-pounds-can-wear-whatever-the-fck-they-want/feed/019275309_10156218108024256_2188121432932527656_najbanks077giphy“Realizations”https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/08/realizations/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/08/realizations/#commentsThu, 08 Jun 2017 00:44:07 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=439]]>Disclaimer: this is just a filler until I figure out until I figure out what I’m going to do with this blog.

When I’m alone at night it suddenly hits

A thought moving forward from the closet space of my brain

It’s so determined to make it’s way through the front it squeezes itself into any space it can fit

It feels less like a back slap and more like a gun shot

The thought moves so fast to the front lines that I can’t make it stop

I call it a “realization” so that I don’t have to admit that this is really fucked up

It’s a note that my brain took years ago and waited until now to bring it up

Whenever I’m at a time when I feel pretty good about where I stand

A “realization” comes like an unwanted friend with some really heavy luggage in hand

The “realization” reads out in big bold letters across my inner mind

THIS IS THE REASON WHY YOU ARE ALONE

THIS IS THE REASON WHY ON FRIDAY NIGHTS YOU WOULD RATHER STAY AT HOME

THIS IS THE REASON WHY YOU LET DEPRESSION GET THE UPPER HAND

AND THIS IS THE REASON WHY NO ONE WILL EVER UNDERSTAND

And because I can never seem to make the “realizations” fade away

I always cave in and let them stay

Now that unwanted friend has turned into a monster that will take more than a happy thought to keep it at bay

Now because it was my choice to give those “realizations” a voice I am left feeling hollow inside

Now it takes so much energy to not to cry

I am nothing more than an empty shell

My mind has become my own version of hell until morning

When the sun chases the “realizations” away and is replaced by a to do list

THIS IS ALL WE HAVE TO DO BEFORE SUN DOWN:

Because of that list I am able to forget, if only for a couple of hours, of what happens at night when I’m alone

And for those couple of hours, for those blissful couple of hours, my mind is finally my own

Connect with me:

@focused_genesis focusedgenesis ladysentalks.com

]]>https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/06/08/realizations/feed/1ajbanks077My Journey with Fitness and Balance: You Can Bake Your Cake and Eat It Toohttps://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/05/14/my-journey-with-fitness-and-balance-you-can-bake-your-cake-and-eat-it-too/
https://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/2017/05/14/my-journey-with-fitness-and-balance-you-can-bake-your-cake-and-eat-it-too/#respondSun, 14 May 2017 22:02:56 +0000http://focusedgenesis.wordpress.com/?p=429]]>So today I wanted to talk a little bit about a thought that has recently sprung back up in my mind. This idea has also been in the back of my mind since the beginning of my fitness journey.

The idea that you can’t love fitness and love food at the same time boggles my mind.

It seems to me that the fitness community takes the phrase “you can’t bake a cake and it eat it too” too seriously. While there are some boundaries that have to kept in mind when you mix that phrase in with fitness it doesn’t make sense. So you’re telling me I can’t love running and a good greasy pizza every now and then? While you can’t eat cheeseburgers all week and only workout one day for 15 minutes I don’t see anything wrong with keeping a balance with food and fitness.

This realization came to me after three long years of struggling with my weight.

I started my fitness journey back in 2015 and my intentions were all wrong. I was changing myself because I wanted a guy to like the way I looked. I started out light, only doing 30 minutes of cardio and light lifting. What started out as light workouts turned into almost two hours in the gym every day. I lost 20 pounds very quickly.

From an outside stand point that sounds like a pretty good routine doesn’t it? When I got home from the gym it was a different story.

I would look in the mirror and squeeze the areas of my body I thought had too much fat. I developed a routine of eating, throwing it up later, then eating again a couple hours later and repeating this routine all day. If the numbers on the scale didn’t go down within 24 hours I spiraled into depression and became too disgusted with myself to eat.

When I finally realized that the guy I was trying to look good for wasn’t going to be mine I resorted to a “fuck it” attitude. I told myself that if I meet a man then they’re going to like me because of my personality not because of my body. If they don’t like me at my Christmas body then they can’t have me when my summer body comes. So I ate and ate and ate until I gained all of the weight that I had lost back and then some.

This mentality lasted from the end of 2015 and most of 2016. I didn’t wake up from this mentality until I noticed certain things started happening to me. My hands and arms would get numb to the point it was painful. I developed a ring around my neck. When I did my research I found that these were symptoms of diabetes.

So I went back to the gym before Christmas of last year, terrified I was going to get judged for gaining so much weight. Much to my surprise no one judged me. No one even looked my way at the gym. Everyone was wrapped up in doing their own thing and I was worrying about them judging me.

Since then I’ve learned to keep a nice balance between my love of fitness and my love of food. Workouts at the gym are balanced and if I feel like a workout is getting easy then I up the ante. On days I have to go into work I do yoga and Pilates. I eat the foods I love (i.e. pizza, cheeseburgers, barbecue) but I keep them in healthy proportion.

I’ve learned that fitness is all about balance and putting your intentions in the right place. When I started my intentions were all wrong and landed me back into depression and dealing with what I didn’t understand at the time was an eating disorder.

Now all I’m worried about when I workout is my happiness. Running makes me happy but the five dollar lunch combo at Little Caesars also makes me happy. I’m not going to sacrifice one thing that makes me happy for the other. You can have both.

The point of telling the story of my fitness journey is not to try and gain sympathy votes; it’s to make a point. I’m a big girl that loves to run, I love doing yoga, I love dancing. Fitness is a lifestyle change but it does not mean that you HAVE to lose weight unless it’s life or death.

The last time I checked that scale I was just under 200 pounds and I am perfectly fine with that. I am also perfectly fine if I lose more weight. I am also perfectly fine if I gain weight from muscle building. I am perfectly happy with wherever I end up on the scale and that’s what fitness should be about. Don’t focus so much on losing weight that you find yourself unhappy with the results when you get to your goal weight. Focus on the happiness you feel during and after that workout.

You can be a bigger person that loves fitness and food at the same time. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. It can be done. Fitness is not a box that focuses solely on weight loss and cutting carbs. It’s about the happiness you feel from working out that changes your life.

Yes I am big. Yes I love fitness. Yes I love food. And that’s okay.

Leave your thoughts and comment below and don’t forget get to connect with me!

The Review:
This book has got to be my favorite book of the series! The plot twists right when you think everything is going to be okay, the character development, and the fact that other characters seem to be making their way back into the series it all makes me so excited to read Heir of Fire. If you thought that Throne of Glass was full of plot twists Crown of Midnight will throw you for a loop.

The story line makes so much more sense now. There are so many things that I could talk about but one of the main things that made things make more sense was the fact that is the saving grace Princess Aelin!!!!! Oh my gosh! Think about it. In the first book there was a scene in the beginning where she woke up surrounded by a circle of flowers in the dead of fall. That revealed that she has magic and her back story as well contributes to things as well.

Since we’re talking about magic let’s talk about Dorain Havilliard and the fact that he has magic! Dorian and Celaena, or should I say Aelin, have now discovered that they have magic which means that magic is not dead, it’s just lying dormant in those who had magical family lines.

The character development in this installment was phenomenal! I have so much more of an appreciation for Celaena now. She is such a badass in this novel and I am beyond surprised at how much I enjoyed her. I also like how vulnerable she was when she and Chaol finally got together.

I have to say that I don’t really like her and Chaol together. He’s so boring and safe compared to Dorian. Dorian makes Celaena laugh, and she is a wake up call for him. I think it’s safe to say that I really love Dorian.
Her relationships seem to mean so much more because it was actually voiced that she was tired of losing friends. Of course we all know when a character says they’re tired of losing friends and relationships a relationship has to be lost. Which brings me to the topic of Nehemia.

I hate, absolutely hate that Nehemia had to die. Out of all the characters in this series Nehemia is my favorite. I imagine her as small and delicate looking but her personality is anything but delicate. She didn’t take any bulshit and voiced her voiced her opions whether the king liked it or not. She knew and saw all of the wrong things that the king was doing and she was going to do anything in her power to stop it.

I do not know how I’m going to get through this series without Nehemia. I also want to punch Chaol in the face for letting it happen. I’ve seen a lot of people that are 100 percent team Chaol and I just can’t side with him, not after what he did. He could have warned Calaena and none of what happened would have happened. I don’t care if he saved the dog. Chaol Westfall has fallen from grace.

I can’t wait to start reading Heir of Fire. I’ve been taking breaks in between books in the series and reading a different book after reading a book from this series and I’m regretting it just a little bit this time. I want to read Heir of Fire so bad!