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Remember back in the early 2000’s when livejournal was still a thing, and msn messenger usage was rampant? Is my age showing by admitting that these kinds of things were everything to me when I was younger? Along with these terrible online outlets for teen angst, there was also the ubiquitous “survey”. Where you would answer random questions about yourself, 0r give a certain number of facts about yourself and then your friends would do the same. I’m feeling a bit nostalgic for that so I decided to do a 27 facts about me, since you know… I’m an old 27 year old hag.

I am Filipino, Spanish, English and Scottish. I always find the need to start with this fact because people always ask (or secretly speculate about my ethnicity). Guesses have run the gambit from some sort of South American, Polynesian, and ocassionaly Aboriginal. I’ve even had Inuit a time or two. I’d say that the Filipino genes are obviously the strongest. Papa Sanchez, you’ve got good genes.

Twinsies.

I have a B.A. in Psychology and I minored in History. I also studied Psychiatric Nursing and fucking hated it. I don’t use any of my education in my line of work and I’m very content with that now (after a long period of feeling like a total failure).

I grew up in the city of Winnipeg. Haters gon’ hate but I don’t care. To me, Winnipeg is a fantastic place to grow up and a safe place to have a family. But it’s not the place for me right now since I’m not really in the child bearing state of mind right now. But maybe one day.

I credit my Grandma for giving me any sense of a backbone. She is the toughest lady I have ever known. She had 10 children, was widowed at 40, and managed to keep her family, her businesses and her life afloat. She was a strict but loving grandmother to 16 grandchildren and I continue to strive to be like her.

Proof that a beer a day keeps the doctor away.

My soul mate in life is my best friend Danielle. We are weird and creepy together in a way that no one else can quite understand. Although she’s a stupid whore bag who decided to move to a completely different continent, our bond is unbreakable. We will literally skype for hours upon hours, most of time crying from laughing so hard. She’s not only my best friend, but she’s the one person I know I can always count on to tell it to me straight without ever judging me.

I think we were serenading each other.

I have an intense fear, verging on phobia of things that don’t have legs. This includes but is not limited to snakes, worms, slugs, and maggots. The smaller they are the more terriffied of them I am. Those little green worms that you sometimes find in apples and the like are the absolute worst. Ick. I have a friend who once covered my car with the fake worm fishing lures and put gummy worms in my shoes before I put them on. Needless to say I was traumatized.

I like to read. Not just a little bit but obsessively. I read a lot of historical, WWII non-fiction. A friend of mine gave me a vintage copy of the Rise and Fall of the Third Reich and it’s one of my most prized posessions.

Tall men are a huge weakness for me. Some girls like gingers, some like tall dark and handsome, I like em tall. My track record reflects that with my most recent ex being 6’6″. Tall guys are my #1 panty remover (#2 is gin).

I can do pretty convincing accents. My Irish friend Ollie that I met last weekend agrees.

When I was a little girl I had a huge crush on Richie Valens and watched La Bamba like a zillion times. It didn’t compute for me that he was actually dead, so I guess you could say I had a really big crush on Lou Diamond Phillips. Embarrassing.

I’m allergic to animals. That’s why I have a sphynx named Felix. I love cats, but my allergies have gotten so bad over the years that I can’t handle any dander at all. So when people get mad at me for having a purebred I tell em to fuck off! I’d have tons of cats from the humane society if I could. I am the quintessential crazy cat lady. I just don’t want to have to take Benedryl every day for the rest of my life.

My precious wrinkly bastard.

My middle name is Andréa, not Andrea, Andréa, after my paternal Grandpa who’s name was Andres. Oh so Spanish. I have one uncle who has never referred to me as Lisa but always Lisa Andréa.

As I’m a slave to the Starbucks, my regular drink is a grande, triple, no foam, skinny vanilla latté. Yes I’m aware this sounds pretentious, and no it is most definitely not VSG appropriate. But its so yummy.

I could live on a diet of nothing but rare steak and cheese. I’d be so content. Post VSG steak does not agree with me at all and it’s very sad.

I think the scent a person wears says a lot about them. My favourite scent I have ever owned has been Dior Pure Poison.

I have a Sylvia Plath obsession, and not in that “I’m a sad and depressed 20-something woman” way, but rather in the sense that I wish I could have known her.

My toes are double jointed.

Although I’ve done my fair share of traveling, the one place I want to visit more than anywhere else is Zanzibar.

Speaking of traveling, my favorite city I’ve ever visited is Berlin. Which I went on a sketchy trip to with my best friend when we were inexperienced, naive 20-year-olds.

My best friends Danielle and I have an love (verging on obsession) of Rammstein. It was our goal in life to see them in concert, which we did a few years ago. Even though neither one of us are the black eyeliner, combat boot wearing badasses of our youth, our not so secret Rammstein love persists.

I’m phobic of anything that doesn’t have legs. Worms, snakes, maggots. None of them are my friends.

I really like to bake, it’s a hobby that I inherited from my Auntie Aida who is the resident baker in our family. But I have a strange habit of talking to myself in an English accent when I’m baking, often times pretending I’m hosting my own cooking show. I really wish I was kidding.

Don’t my protein cookies look delectable?

I’m very bad at relationships, I’m sure this will be an ongoing theme in my life. I very rarely allow someone to see my true colours, and once they do, it’s not usually very pretty.

I grind my teeth in my sleep, and I often have dreams about my teeth falling out. I’ve been told that this is rather common and can have to do with anything from anxiety to saying something you wish you hadn’t said.

I’m very superstitious. This must be a Filipino thing.

People constantly assume that I’m adopted.

This would be why, ain’t know way that baby came out of that lady. Am I right?

This entire comment completely made my morning, so I feel like I have to respond to every single point.

1. Is it weird that I can totally tell the Asianess in you? It must be a secret talent that only us halfers have.

2. Rep the G-ma love!

3. Is your Daniel half black like my Danielle? If so I would be even more freaked out.

4.You called the Inglorious Basterds obsession.

5. I literally drool over tall men in public, and I’ll follow them around. I need to start hanging out at those big and tall mens stores.

6. I one time worked with a kid who had no legs, who also happened to be a ginger, and accidentally commented on my hate for gingers and things with no legs, and then I caught myself and wanted to crawl into a hole and die, so you win on that fact too!

7. Get a sphynx and tell everyone else to fuck off. He’s the best pet I’ve ever had in my life.

8. You should just start responding to your mom in her own accent. That’s what I do to my dad all the time, it’s so confusing for him and hilarious for me.

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