Sorry Honey, Can’t Load the Dishwasher Because A New Study Says Men Who Help With Housework Get Less Sex

Married men who kiss up to their old ladies by helping out with the housework are less likely to be bumping uglies with that same misses at the end of the night, according to a new study.

Researchers from the Center for Advanced Studies at the Juan March Institute in Madrid say that husbands that take on the household duties of cooking, cleaning and shopping are reportedly getting less poontang from their wives than men that do more traditional, masculine labor.

“Couples in which men participate more in housework typically done by women report having sex less frequently,” says study author Sabino Kornrich. “Similarly, couples in which men participate more in traditionally masculine tasks — such as yard work, paying bills, and auto maintenance — report higher sexual frequency.”

Note from the female associate editor: That’s because manual labor is sexy, this is 100% accurate. Trust the data.

However, Kornrich is quick to point out that husbands may not want to go home tonight and get all 1950s on their better halves, refusing to help out. That’s because research finds that men who do housework are not having that much less sex than husbands that don’t – 5.2 times per month vs. 5.6 times.

In addition, there is also a good possibility that not helping out around the house could make a man’s life a living hell. “Men who refuse to help around the house could increase conflict in their marriage and lower their wives’ marital satisfaction,” said Kornrich. It’s most likely not worth the epic screaming match, when you look at the small numerical difference in the data — We’ve never had decimal sex, but it doesn’t sound nearly as fun as whole number sex.

Its been our experience that pitching in around the house is the only sane way to both keep the peace and tear off a piece at the end of the day. After all, a little emasculation is a small price to pay for a regular rumble in the sack. Just consider it indentured sexitude!

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