Can’t Hardly Wait

June 12, 1998

CAN’T HARDLY WAIT is a summer of ’98 teen comedy that seems to mean something to people who were the right age then. I’m too old, but for some reason I saw it back then and it didn’t work on me. And now I gave it another shot.

It’s a one-day-right-after-graduation story in the tradition of AMERICAN GRAFFITI or DAZED AND CONFUSED or BLADE[citation needed], centering around a party where Preston (Ethan Embry, LATE PHASES) is trying to get up the guts to talk to his secret crush Amanda (Jennifer Love Hewitt, I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER, GARFIELD) because he heard she broke up with her jock asshole boyfriend Mike Dexter (Peter Facinelli, TWILIGHT). Preston thinks he can win her over by giving her a love letter he’s been revising for four years. Good luck with that one, pal. He drags along his cynical best friend Denise (Lauren Ambrose, WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE), who I was relieved to realize does not have an unrequited crush on him (in fact they laugh about having briefly dated in middle school). She’s very unhappy and ignored at the party, which obviously means she’ll have her rocky heart softened by an unexpected love connection or some shit, but she’s the most charming and relatable character, the one who seems like she probly wouldn’t like this movie, and I’m sure the main reason why some people do.

Another plot thread involves Kenny (Seth Green, THE ITALIAN JOB), a former nerdy kid now trying to be cool in his harem pants [important correction: my friend Cristin says “I think they were JNCO jeans… ultra-wide straight legs”] and goggles, talking about “hos” and “bitches” because he’s hoping to lose his virginity tonight. He’s supposed to be a kid who’s too imitative of black culture as he perceives it from rap videos and such, but Green’s performance is BULWORTH-level uncomfortable – not just awkward slang and accent but full-on caricature voice and making it clear that Kenny believes the most base stereotypes about black men being misogynistic sex hounds. And when Denise calls him on it she doesn’t say “You’re not being yourself, you’re a phony, and you have a degrading view of black culture,” she says, “You’re white.”

I did laugh, though, when it got to the punchline of what happens when Kenny’s friends try to talk like that to black people. It doesn’t go well.

This is the directing debut of Deborah Kaplan & Harry Elfont, after having written A VERY BRADY SEQUEL. Three years later they did JOSIE AND THE PUSSYCATS, which I found much more enjoyable. I suppose they’re similar in their light-hearted goofiness mixed with sincerity about friendship and what not. This one’s not as funny or clever, though.

One touch that’s kind of cute is that most of the characters outside of the leads don’t have names. Instead it’s like “Girl Whose Party It Is” (Michelle Brookhurst, FOXFIRE), “Ready to Have Sex Girl” (Nicole Bilderback, MERCENARIES) and “Reminiscing Guy” (Victor Togunde, LEPRECHAUN BACK 2 THA HOOD). Also I kinda like the conceit of the band (including Donald Faison from CLUELESS on drums) excited about playing their first show, already having t-shirts, facing internal conflicts, breaking up and reuniting without ever getting around to playing their music.

I can’t tell if the opening is a stylistic experiment gone wrong or a desperate postproduction compromise, but it’s a scene at graduation where you see their gowns, not their faces, and there are snippets of conversation clearly recorded in a studio very much in the style of a local radio ad with adults trying to play cool teens. I don’t know how the youths of 1998 didn’t accuse the movie of being a narc and walk out, but they didn’t.

Parliament, Busta Rhymes, Missy Elliott and Run DMC find their way onto the soundtrack, along with the namesake Replacements song, but also lots of the kind of business from the period that I have been complaining about. You’ve got your Third Eye Blind, your Blink 182, and (it probly goes without saying) your Smash Mouth. I guess that’s just life in 1998.

I think the hollowness of the central love story is a big weakness. We learn very little about Preston’s life or personality outside of his wide-eyed mooning for the girl and interpretation of trivial coincidences as signs from the universe. Embry makes some of this funny – he seems dumb in a likable way – but I still had a hard time respecting him when he seemed to have no existence outside of his dumb romantic notions about a girl he doesn’t even know.

Hewitt, likewise, has little to work with outside of being mad at her boyfriend for breaking up with her, then realizing he’s bad, then falling for this kid she doesn’t even know by name despite sitting next to him in class just because she finds his love letter on the ground. Sure, she’s got the shy smile and cartoonish figure to cause such an obsession in a teenage boy, but they know even less about each other than we do, and the getting to know each other happens in AMERICAN GRAFFITI style postscript text (which when this showed in 1998 was being beamed in from the future, I guess, since this is not a period piece).

Charlie Korsmo gets what must be his biggest role after DICK TRACY as William, a nerd who plans revenge on Mike Dexter but while undercover at the party he gets drunk for the first time and ends up having fun instead. This seems like a weirdly irresponsible message for kids:

1) If you get super drunk you will be cool

2) If you karaoke Guns ‘n Roses with enough enthusiasm everyone will think it’s the greatest thing they’ve ever seen and worship you as a god, like when Ferris Bueller lip-synched in that parade. And three women will run over to you and fight over which two get to make out with you.

But I guess the ’80s movie spirit was still alive in ’98. Also I laughed pretty hard at the part where he comes up to the keg and asks some bros “Is this the beer?”

I have a hard time buying that drunkenness would cause this kid to forgive the bully he has a vendetta against. But I suppose the ultimate result of that (SPOILER: Mike lies to police to keep William out of trouble, but then is mean to him the next day like it never happened) isn’t too far off.

I think all will agree that the worst and most dated part is a brief homophobic streak. William’s nerd friends chloroform Mike and his friend and set them up to look gay, and a cop sees them and calls them “sickos.” This is similar to a thing that happened in HEATHERS, except here you’re laughing at the victim of the homophobia, not the homophobe. This is more clear in the scene where somebody yells out “Fag!” and it’s clearly supposed to be a crowd-pleasing comeuppance. I forgot they still did that shit in movies this late.

Other 1998isms: The two nerd friends wear “Trust No One” and “The Truth Is Out There” shirts and are credited as X-Phile #1 and #2. The internet is mentioned a few times. No one has phones. There are a bunch of bit parts by actors who are better known now: Jason Segel as “Watermelon Guy,” Selma Blair as “Girl Mike Hits On #1,” Amber Benson as “Stoned Girl.” Also I noticed Freddy Rodriguez (the guy who got his nose ring pulled out in PAYBACK) and Jaime Pressly (D.O.A.: DEAD OR ALIVE), Clea DuVall (GHOSTS OF MARS) and Eric Balfour (HELL RIDE, BEATDOWN). Also Breckin Meyer is in the band; he will ultimately hook up with Jennifer Love Hewitt in the GARFIELDduology.

CAN’T HARDLY WAIT wasn’t very well reviewed, but it more than doubled its low budget at the domestic box office, and seems to be remembered well. Ten years after the fact it made an appearance as the movie teen girls watch in the PROM NIGHT remake. On DVD it got a “10 Year Reunion Edition” including a new commentary with filmmakers and cast reunited. If that didn’t suggest they thought it was a teen classic, maybe the featurette “Can’t Hardly Wait: The Making of a Teen Classic” does. And I’ve found many lists and articles to prove that some writers agree with that. In 2011, Complex put it at #50 on “The 50 Best School Movies.” In 2012, Entertainment Weekly ranked it 44 on a list of 50 Best High School Movies (though their write up includes the phrase “It may be a typical teen, comedy, but…”). In 2016, Cosmopolitan called it “the most underappreciated teen film of all time” and “the greatest teen movie of all time” (tellingly this was more of a collection of gifs than an article). And E Online called it the “one real and true teen party comedy to beat all teen party comedies… In the discussion of what makes this genre so great, there is no better example.”

I would blame this on nostalgia, but Mallory Carra wrote about the movie on Bustle in 2015, saying that she never liked it as a 17 year old but does now. That surprised me. It hasn’t started to win me over yet. I’ll have to try again when Jennifer Love Hewitt turns 60.

VERN has been reviewing movies since 1999 and is the author of the books SEAGALOGY: A STUDY OF THE ASS-KICKING FILMS OF STEVEN SEAGAL, YIPPEE KI-YAY MOVIEGOER!: WRITINGS ON BRUCE WILLIS, BADASS CINEMA AND OTHER IMPORTANT TOPICS and NIKETOWN: A NOVEL. His horror-action novel WORM ON A HOOK will arrive later this year.

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49 Responses to “Can’t Hardly Wait”

Alls I remember about this is skipping it when it first came out because, having graduated high school three years prior to the characters in the movie, I thought I was too old for it. Later I caught it on HBO or something and liked it more than I expected to. At the very least, I remember preferring this to American Pie which I saw around the same time.

I boycotted this at the time, as it was dedicated to the class of ’98 and I was class of ’97. Unacceptable.

A few years ago I finally watched it and actually did enjoy it. All of Vern complaints are totally valid (the homophobic stuff especially is shocking) but none of that was enough to ruin it for me. Calling it a “classic” is a stretch for sure.

I also thought it looked great. Comedies from this era are usually so flat and drab, so it was nice to see one that’s really filmic and cinematic.

Back when I was a film student, I referred to this movie as Can’t Hardly Act because I was clever. Then I finally saw it on video and ended up liking it. I haven’t seen it since and don’t doubt Vern’s assessment. As I recall, the Seth Green appropriating black culture didn’t play well back then either, and the homophobia and white knightliness would not play well now.

Still, could it be that Can’t Hardly Wait is the summer 1998 movie that has had the most impact on pop culture? It may be because there just weren’t ’80s style teen comedies for so long. They really came back with American Pie the following year. I guess there was Clueless, but still there wasn’t the output that John Hughes alone was responsible.

It has been a while since I have seen this movie. Does the movie take a position on whether William himself is homophobic? Is that why they want to set Mike Dexter up with that particular prank? Or does he think Mike is homophobic, so they use that prank – not so much because William is homophobic, but because he thinks Mike is, and would be humiliated by it? Is it left up to the audience to fill that in? And how much, if any, does that change how you look at it?

I’m also Class of ’97, so this also felt decidedly not-my-jam when it opened. I caught it when it came out at Blockbuster, and I guess as “Come on, no one you went to school with was this boring” teen movies go, I preferred it to EMPIRE RECORDS. Like, it’s mildly likeable, even if it seems aimed at and about whichever audience that “Abercrombie and Fitch/Chinese food” song was intended for.

Strangely, “Atomic Dog” showed up in a party scene in 10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU a year later, so the P-Funk empire was having an influence in some very middlebrow teen movies at this time. (Respect to Gabrielle Union, but otherwise, the point stands.)

Class of ’97 here as well (funny how that’s becoming a motif here), and I still have a soft spot for this one. I was a Charlie Korsmo type in high school, and my bestest, oldest buddy-mos def an Ethan Embry type (seriously, they could be cousins or something) saw this one together when it came out. It sounds like some stuff definitely hasn’t aged well, but my favorite gag will never go out of style: When the cops bust the party at the end, Mike Dexter and Charlie Korsmo are sitting at the piano. Mike yells “The cops!” and Korsmo starts playing some silent movie, Keystone Kops music on the piano before Mike drags him away.

I hope I get a chance to watch that on my deathbed, coz it never fails to make me laugh.

I didn’t realize there was any residual love for this film. I was in high school at the time that it came out, but I never saw it then, and I haven’t since. I thought it was one of those films that just sort of faded away. But I guess Can’t Hardly Wait mania rages on to this day.

There is something about films that take place over a condensed period of time that I find really appealing for whatever reason: Before Sunrise, Sunset, Midnight, American Graffiti, Dazed and Confused (which I’m shocked Vern hasn’t reviewed), and, of course, Die Hard. To do this kind of story well, I think it takes a tremendous amount of discipline and creativity.

It’s funny how these past few reviews could also be a series of relationship/dating advice. It’s probably not healthy to obsess over someone because they like the same kind of pop tart. Don’t be a jealous stalker. Don’t be a cheater. Don’t put a hit out on your wife. Stay alert for red flags that may indicate mental illness and/or demonic possession.

I’m a little younger than this flick (class of ‘02, bay-bee!) but I can confirm that it retains a huge amount of popularity amongst my peers of a similar age. I think the age difference must have made the kids in the movie seem real cool to those of us 4-5 years younger.

Embry has the distinction of the being the cast member that was actually IN a John Hughes (written, at least) movie… Dutch
And I always found it amusing that he went on to be partners with Ed ONeil in the 00s Dragnet reboot since he’d been the snotty little shit kid of ONeil’s girlfriend in Dutch.

Embry had a bit of a Anthony Michael Hall arc… not just because they both did Hughes movies and also both played Rusty Griswold (another Hughes connection, one more direct than the other)… but they both had a string of movies as teens where they were just so damn likable in varying degrees of geekiness (Hall with the obvious and Embry with Empire Records, Vegas Vacation, That Thing You Do and Can’t Hardly Wait) and then kind of disappeared for a minute… only reappear all buff and weird looking and likely pretty much stop getting the same kind of work and roles as a result.
Maybe in 10 years, Embry will get a bit part in the inevitable Batman Begins Yet Again trilogy.

Also…I do like this movie a lot despite its flaws. It just has a breezy likability to it. I was by all counts too old for it when it came out, but my roommate at the time always wanted to see all the newest teen movies and I always thought this was one of the better ones of that late 90s string that I guess started around She’s All That and then took a hard left after the success of American Pie.

Also dug seeing Charlie Korsmo again… he had done Dick Tracy and Men Don’t Leave with Jessica Lange (a movie I have oddly seen more times than anyone I know- hell I dunno if I even know anyone who has seen it once) and What About Bob pretty much back to back and then spent a few years in puberty before coming back with this one.

There is an Easter Egg in Josie And The Pussycats where one of the subliminal messages was “Can’t Hardly Wait Was Underrated” or something to that effect.

I would have been 11 when this came out, and I don’t think this is or ever was big in the UK, but I did see it when I was 17 in 2004 and rather enjoyed it, mostly, I have to admit, for the Green/Ambrose (who I was rather taken with) subplot, and the running joke with Melissa Joan-Hart.

Didn’t this come with (an early example of) the least desired of all late 90s/early 00s accoutrements; a Smash Mouth tie-in video? Even with a bit where the lead singer insulted one of the actors?

To be fair, it was pre-“All Star” when the band were still just fairly lame, but inoffensive, third-wave ska bandwagon jumpers and hadn’t yet become full-on intolerable.

There sure are a lot of pretty girls with nice hair in the video though- for people that notice those kinds of things- and it may well have gotten McG his gig directing Charlie’s Angels- so we can all at least be grateful for that.

I never even bothered with 6 Days, 7 Nights… isn’t that the joint where Ford debuted his earring?

I tried to watch Dirty Work once and it was so painfully, uncomfortably unfunny (it reminded me of that first Adam Sandler “comedy” album) that I had to turn it off. I liked Norm McDonald’s Weekend Update (unlike many) and his Burt Reynolds/Turd Ferguson, but I find him generally pretty grating in a Gilbert Godfried way doing most anything else.

Class of ’03 here. This movie is a piece of shit. It, and other movies that reward boys for their internal fantasy worlds, may be partially responsible for Elliot Rodger-type psychotic incels. THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY kinda subverted the same theme, but maybe not.

On the subject of hopes for this review series, I haven’t seen RUSH HOUR in many years and I wonder how that one has aged.

I didn’t mean he was LIKE Gilbert Gottfried, but that his personality is as grating to me AS Gilbert Gottfried’s. The one thing that they DO have in common is seeming perpetually annoyed and angry (though they obviously express it completely differently) even with a huge smile… which, when doing the “news” works, but beyond that… for me… it’s just… grating.

Speaking of Norm MacDonald, he has deleted his entire YouTube account. It formerly consisted of many interviews with old comics, mainly of the SNL era. The format was wild; and not PC, including some off-color sex stuff. Guess he didn’t feel like defending that crap.

I recently started watching THE MIDDLE* and Norm McDonald has a recurring role there as the good hearted, but also pretty dumb and immoral in a “he doesn’t mean harm” way, uncle, which is a pretty surprising role for a guy like him. Not sure why they thought of him when casting it (it might be, because he actually looks like he could be related to the Janitor from SCRUBS, who plays the dad on this show), but it’s nice to see him play such an un-Norm McDonald character from time to time.

*And holy shit, this is the most realistic and relatable family sitcom I’ve ever seen! In almost every episode there is something that makes me laugh extra loud, because it really seems to be taken out of my life!

Well grimgrinningchris, America agreed with you and didn’t go see Norm MacDonald movies, or watch his two tv shows. So I’d say that’s a fair shot and I’m glad he’s found formats that suited his niche.

Although given a real studio push I don’t see why he couldn’t have at least the success of the early Sandler movies, or Rob Schneider for that matter. Mgm really couldn’t distribute anything that wasn’t James Bond by the late 90s.

I may give Dirty Work another shot at some point cuz I do know a ton of people that like it.

I’m sure he could have had an arc like Sandler or Schneider- though I doubt it was just a lack of faith from the money people. Sandler and Schneider both seem like dudes that would do whatever they were told would sell tickets- no matter how boneheaded or classless. I have a feeling MacDonald wouldn’t play ball like that. Which is to his credit, even if I don’t care much for watching him on screen.

He DID have a great joke 25+ years ago in his standup about homeless people with dogs. Confused dogs. “What the hell? This is the longest walk I’ve ever been on!” Speaking of changing tastes- yeah, that would not fly these days.

It reminded me of the sort of comment that is typical of the younger (or older and never wiser) set that think they are above the material but don’t really know why or how to express it. I know I said shit like that too. No doubt. Now, we ARE older (and most on Vern’s sight, wiser) and can articulate our beefs and kudos more clearly.

I actually got into it with a young’n a while back in regards to that TCM movie that doesn’t exist. They were going on about that it was “cheesy” and “the acting is sooo bad” yada yada yada… If that movie existed, and even if it was a piece of shit, the acting in it was not “bad” in any sense. One thing I will give that mass hallucination that never actually happened- is that those “kids” seemed genuinely terrified and even THAT is rare in horror- especially horror that we know is a figment of our imaginations. But this one was conditioned that “horror movie= bad acting” and she didn’t like the movie (still not sure how she even saw it since it was certainly never a thing that was shown in theaters or released on home formats or ever filmed for that matter) but was not savvy enough to explain why, so she falls back on stereotypes.
Sister, you don’t know what bad acting in a horror movie is.

Also Eric Balfour, who wasn’t in that movie that nobody was in because it was never made – actually has a tiny tiny part in Can’t Hardly Wait…

I haven’t seen this movie in eons, but I watched it about a dozen times on HBO when I was a kid (Class of ‘07, since were sharing).

I legit loved this movie and the soundtrack (sans smash mouth). It’s charming and funny and… I was too young to contextualize the problematic content.

I remember buying the dvd a few years back and enjoying it then. No urge to watch it today, but i would definitely include it in my high school movie canon. And on the subject of the DVD, I recall that it had a way-above-average commentary track, or two included.

Kaplan and Elefonte were really talented, budding directors. Too bad they’ll never get a third chance behind the camera.

Yeah, I get getting your keys taken away after having two movies in a row underperform at the box office… but when both have undoubtedly reached serious cult status (Josie moreso, but CHW still for sure) in the ensuing years, you’d think someone would let them take the car out again…

One half of the duo is a woman so that might explain it. Women who don’t start with huge hits don’t get the same amount of chances white maill directors with shittier movies gey constant chances. Boom I just got political.

You’re right, grimgrinningchris. In my youth I thought nothing of making dismissive jokes at actors’ expense. As I matured I learned they were human beings trying to do a good job too and I was capable of much more sophisticated discussion. Not to mention I ultimately saw the movie and liked it.

Also there was no twitter back then so no chance the cast of Can’t Hardly Wait would hear me. As opposed to now when someone could find this thread and I’ve just reopened old wounds. Sorry, gang. I do realize the error of my ways (and never got a laugh from the joke either then or now so the joke’s on me.)

I was doing a music ‘zine (though I also talked bout movies a bit) at the time that this came out and even though I was well into my 20s at the time, I fucking cringe re-reading some of that shit now. Like asimov would put some of my attempts at critique and humor (and humorous critique) to shame just by making up more derogatory names for JJ Abrams over and over again. In comparison, “Can’t Hardly Act” isn’t bad at all.

Let’s see if we can do some other teen movies from that period.

She’s Not All That
Never Been Nominated For An Oscar
Varsity Snooze
Drool Intentions
Hallraker

Yeah, those are awful. I couldn’t even think of anything for 10 Things I Hate About You or American Pie. Gene Shalit is not amused.

On a different note, by way of the Twilight series, would The Fatch be the most successful of the alumni of this movie? As an actor, at least- I think as a writer and producer Seth Green has obviously been more successful. Well shit, I bet the Austin Powers series outgrossed the Twilight series. Nevermind.

I accept your challenge. 10 Things I Hate About Watching This Movie kind of writes itself. And, let’s say Pie Fucker. And we can say this with love since both are now beloved teen classics. What was Hallraker a spoof of? I didn’t even get that.

I’d still say if you name anyone in the Can’t Hardly Wait cast, Jennifer Love Hewitt is the only one people would know by name. Green has a bit of an animation empire going, and I will say five Twilights probably grossed more than 3 Austin Powerses. And let’s give Ambrose props for her acclaimed work on Six Feet Under. She’s probably the most respected of that cast now.

pegsman… I think Fred meant now. And though all of them were recognizable at the time, I’m sure that the average moviegoer knew their faces but not their names- beyond “the kid from Hook” and “nu-Rusty Griswold”

Ambrose was great on Six Feet Under- but my little crush on her began with this movie.

I don’t believe any group of humans is inherently more or less likely to succumb to mental illness and interpersonal conflict than any other group. I think some elements of society must be to blame.

I don’t think violent movies or video games number among those elements, but I find it very easy to connect the sort of attitude espoused by the Isla Vista shooter with the bullshit CAN’T HARDLY WAIT is selling. Namely, that women are empty golems to project men’s wish fulfillment scenarios upon, and that if the right boxes are checked, men can expect them to respond accordingly.

I’m not trying to argue we need to start censoring film in order to prevent school shootings, but I think it’s fair to condemn this movie and others from its era as culturally toxic.

You know, long before this was sadly our new normal, I had a similar opinion on violent movies and rom coms. I knew that people knew the difference between movie fantasy and real life when it came to violent action movies. Like nobody thought Rambo was real but we enjoyed the fantasy.

But I bet lots of idiots thought standing outside a girl’s window with a boom box would work. Or courting your best friend because they just had to be the one for you. Rom coms were much harder to distinguish as fantasy. I say this as the misguided teen who tried to be the rom com hero. Fortunately I caused little more than embarrassment, mainly towards myself.

I outgrew it by living real life but I’m glad we’re talking about it in society now. Boy the Can’t Hardly Wait thread got dark.