Thursday, June 01, 2006

Crazy Eights

Before leaving for my Canadian vacation with my "gf," I stopped at my parents' house, where I watched the Rays-Sox game on Friday night. Seeing that goofy Rays' catcher named Paul wearing number eight made me think of that third base coach named Butterfield whose number should be eight, because of the 1935 book Butterfield 8.

Then, my dad noted that JT Snow should wear eight--theoretically; my dad's fully aware the number is retired--because "8" is "the snowman." I never heard that one, but, I guess a two-segmented snowhuman does look a bit like an eight.

Upon from my return from the great white HOT AS HELL north, I again stopped at my folks', and we watched tonight's Jays-Sox game. I noticed that Butterfield was the Jays' third base coach. I'd forgotten what team he was with. Then Snow came in the game. Okay, both "should be eight" guys. But then Jermaine Van Buren came in. I've mentioned here before how he should be an eight, because of the Seinfeld episode where Kramer gets a free pass from the "Van B Boys" because he accidentally flashes eight fingers--the secret sign of the gang, due to Van Buren being the eighth president. Then I saw that dude Alex Rios, and realized he should be an eight. Ocho Rios, get it?

And then the cosmic ballet commenced, as Rios came up to bat against Van Buren, with Snow at first, and Butterfield in the third base coaches' box.

I live for this.

Watch for my pictures from Tuesday's Red Sox-Blue Jays game on Thursday night-ish, along with more gibberish, just like above, and talk of the Timlin apple-eating incident.

And before I go, a quick but very much expected "terrible job" to the Detroit "Laydownanddie-gers."

Peter, are you really curious? The sentence "The [usually lousy team] has the best record in baseball" translates to "The [usually lousy team] will melt like little baby buttercups on a hot stove as soon as they see pinstripes." You know this.

Michael: I gave them three games. Nothing. And now the time is up.

Jeremiah: My dad said the exact same thing, literally right down to the term "world beaters."