Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Today is Pete’s last day of work. Although he was notified of his lay-off two weeks ago, it still seems a bit unreal. And scary. As of today, we are both jobless. And I’ve never felt so frightened in my life.

Everyone has tough financial times during their life. (Okay, maybe not EVERYONE, but everyone I know.) But even when I’ve had to keep a close eye on my budget, I’ve never worried about my diabetes supplies and my insurance. I’ve been very lucky and I always knew I could get what I need to stay alive and healthy. Now the tide has changed. It feels a bit like my luck has run out. Although we will keep our insurance until the end of March, I’ve already begun to ration supplies. I’m wearing my pump sites one day longer. I’m stretching my sensors as long as I can. I’m trying to save now, because if we need to go on COBRA in April, the premium will cost a fortune.

I’m also worried about the coverage we will get once we find jobs and have a new insurance to deal with. Will I still be able to see my awesome endo? Will my CGM be covered? Will I get as many test strips as I need? Or will I have to fight for coverage on my supplies? And what will our new co-pays be like?

I know I’m not the first one who has been in the situation. I know Pete and I will get through this. I know it will all work out . . . somehow.

But for now, I feel like I’m adrift on a sea of uncertainty . . . waiting to see when the tide will come in and where it will take me. And that is a very scary place to be.

Hey Karen,I know it can sound kind of "cute" and I always feel it is so cliched...but you will get through this.

It was just under a year ago that I faced a very similar situation. Emotionally destroyed, a body riddled with diabetic complications and unemployed. I was sure it was all over. I didn't know how I'd make it through to the next day, or to be honest, if I even wanted to.

It was well over two months until I received my first opening...a full time job working 5 1/2 days a week, it was beyond my wildest dreams....that was until, a little over a month into that, I suffered an enormous "on the job" low blood sugar. I was violently ill and had to go home. Later that night the phone rang...."Simon, having evaluated your performance during your probationary employment with the company, we have decided that you are not the right fit for this company and we are going to let you go. effectine immediately"....

If near blindness, the betrayal of life long friends and lying at deaths door hadn't done it, I was sure this was the lowest I could ever go....

And then....

One night later I received another call..."We have looked at your resume, how soon can you start?"

This was the same dead end job that within nine months has carried me to the US and opened up my eyes to a world of possibilities, amazing people (yourself included) and memories beyond describing.

I am still the same broken down diabetic and to be honest I have only just started rebuilding my life in my mid 30s but I have learned from all of this...that with every ending comes a new beginning.

I'm sorry about the length of the comment. You and Pete remain in my thoughts and prayers and I'm sure the dawning of a new and brighter day is not too far away.

I hate money. I hate insurance companies. I hate that situations like this arise that cause good people to worry. I love that while you go through this time you have a wonderful network of people who will hold you up and help you deal with the emotions. Sending hugs and a virtual cupcake.

I agree with Simon, you get a new beginning with that ending. The new beginning will be even better than the door you are closing. I will keep you and your husband in my prayers – I know everything is going to work out for you!

I've been right where you are a couple of times, Karen. I know how scary it is and how all of a sudden, choices need to be made that maybe weren't even on the radar before. You can make them. You can still take good care of yourself and your D, even if it's in different ways than before. You can, and you will, get through this. It won't be easy, or comfortable, but you two have each other and it will be okay. Not okay as in perfect, but okay as in, you WILL make it and survive. I wish I could make it all better. Know that you are loved and supported, and there are a ton of peeps pulling for you both and wishing you all kinds of goodness. <3 <3 <3

You've got a lovely attitude about this, knowing that things will work out. Though I totally understand that it's scary and uncomfortable to deal with uncertainty and then worry about your diabetes stuff on top of everything else. I hope things turn up really really soon. I remember when my husband was laid off right after we had the twins for whom I had quit my job and it was definitely a weighty feeling to deal with every morning as I reviewed our finances. I know great things are just around the corner for you guys. Stay positive :)

When we got married, my husband was laid off. He interviewed for a job on the way back to my home state for the wedding. And he got the job. Three years later, we both lost our jobs at the same time. He worked temporary jobs until he got called back to his old job. That business closed for good, he found another job, got laid off again, went back to work for a new company and then went back to his old job because it paid better. The last change we went two months without insurance because COBRA was expensive. His employer made sure he would be able to get insurance when he started full-time and it worked. We have been doing this since 1984 and each time one job ends, my husband finds another one. One thing I learned about COBRA--we considered getting a policy to cover when my husband changed jobs last time, just in case it took a while to get a new job. If you don't go with COBRA, you lose the coverage of pre-existing conditions, which is very bad when you are diabetic. We would have paid the premiums on COBRA if necessary to avoid losing that coverage. Also, if you go past 60 day without starting COBRA, same thing happens.You guys can handle this! Things work out--even if you don't have a road map to where they are going!

It will be ok....even though it's hard to see that. I've been uninsured for almost five months and buying supplies out of pocket....and it isn't fun. But, I think that diabetes makes us more resourceful. We can manage situations like this because we manage through worse!

This is my greatest fear (loss of job/insurance coverage) so I am sorry that you are going through that right now. I truly am praying for you two to get employed again soon! The faith you are showing, along with practical resourcefulness, is inspiring to all. Good luck and hope to read a blog post with good news real soon!

Sheri gave some great food for thought. I know that God takes care of people. I don't know how but He does. I have had to be on COBRA twice and I have no idea how my husband and I even paid for it. Yet somehow we did.

You might get jerked around a little with COBRA. Don't let anyone jerk you around. The premiums are hello expensive but the coverage IS EXACTLY THE SAME AS YOUR PREVIOUS INSURANCE. Don't forget that!

Last summer when I was on COBRA I tried to refill my prescriptions and there was a whole COBRA miscommunication. That's not the point of the story. The point is the pharmacy tech gave me the same discounts she gives to patients who have no insurance. I paid like $10 per prescription, or less depending on what it was. I'm not kidding. Tell people what's happening and you might be surprised at how blessed you will be. Medical people know what happens if a diabetic can't get their prescriptions so they will do anything they can to hook you up.

Trust that God knows you and your situation. You will be blessed. It might not be the way you want or in a way you would have ever thought possible, but I promise He takes care of His children. Sorry to go all religious on you but I've been through a lot of crazy times in my life and God's love is one thing I can always count on. He knows you by name. He will bless you.

I'm so sorry you're going through this, Karen. I've been there too many times to count, its definitely a scary place. Get in touch with your emotions, feel scared, but don't let it consume you. Try to let it motivate you. And like all the wonderful advice given here, this too shall pass.

Oh sister, been there, doing it. I am still getting insurance through my former employer's long-term disability plan. But when it ends, I'm hosed. Dialysis patients automatically qualify for Medicare, but, Medicare will only pay for 80% of each treatment, which costs roughly $4000 EACH time. My retirement savings will be gone in the blink of an eye.Fortunately, there is a wealth of information from the DOC. Leave no stone unturned. Help sometimes turns up where you least expect it.Karen, you are very bright and articulate. Get the motor running. Tell everyone and anyone that you are looking for a job - networking can sometime be utter magic. I think Simon's story tells it all.Don't just hang in there - MOVE FORWARD - each and every day.

I Am . . .

Karen Graffeo

I'm a Knitter living with Type 1 Diabetes. I'm not a medical professional nor am I giving medical advice - I'm just a girl sharing my personal thoughts and experiences with diabetes. I live in New England with my wonderful husband, my adorable cat, and lots and lots of yarn.