Tuesday, 26 August 2014

Criticism Stings

Look around you - is anyone universally liked and admired? No - it's not possible. OK Kate Moss has managed to be the wildchild everyone loves. No one, apart from KM, can escape criticism unless they just stand still and don't move, don't say anything, don't do anything.

So given its inevitability, why are we so stung by hurtful criticism? It doesn't make any sense. We have all had our fair share of namecalling and hairpulling. So how do we thicken our skin?

One way is to face up to it. To look at the criticism and to learn from it. Feel the pain. Acknowledge the emotions coursing through.

Then turn that pain outward and defend someone else who is being criticised. Resist joining in roasting someone else's character. If you have children ensure they do not get involved in playground nasties.

We all try. We all fail. We all try again. The stress of realising you don't live in a perfect, safe world where everyone plays fairly and is kind is traumatic enough. Don't join in. Don't be like the rest.

Stand up for people and turn away from malicious gossip and drama queens. The world has enough of that stuff. We need more character and courage. We need more support and good grace.

Life sucks for us all some days - so remember how it feels before you are tempted to dish it out.

Get up and do stuff, here's why...

BusinessWorking well gives people a real sense of achievement and satisfaction. Highly productive and successful people have a strong belief in what they do, a clear understanding of how to progress and a desire to make things happen. They listen and learn and perform at every level. Live business activities stimulate this and support well connected, highly networked confident companies and organisations.

Challenging NormsMany live performances challenge stereotypes and current thinking, offering new solutions to age old problems or just a new viewpoint which stimulates debate

ChemistryA physical chemical that is released when we are close up and personal with others that we find exciting. This is not just a sexual thing it can be released being around people in platonic settings too

ClosenessOften you see couples holding hands or families holding hands when they are at events this is part of the essential glue that binds us

ConnectionWhen we go out and do things we are around other people who are likeminded and enthusiastic this gives us a feeling of connection, an idea we are not alone

CuriosityBeing curious is a healthy state of mind - it means you are open to possibility, alive

DiscussionBy doing different things you can join in conversations with friends and families and even passing strangers and tell them things you are up to

DistractionThe mind needs distraction from worries and anxieties, events and live stuff offers a positive distraction from the daily grind

EnergyWe get energy from everything that surrounds us, live activities generate energy for everyone taking part

FascinationSeeing what people are doing, crafts and skills they exhibit we are taken into a satisfying state of fascination

GraceLooking at fine art takes us into a state of grace as we contemplate the human skill that has gone into the work and the story being told

HappinessA feeling of being alive creates chemicals in the brain which we experience as happiness, getting out and taking part, learning and discovering creates oodles of happiness

InspirationWe find other people inspiring, their talent and determination helps us to see that things are possible, that things are happening, when we experience these close up it makes them real to us and gives us the idea we could do that too

JoyAnother great mood to experience, being around friends, sharing ideas and being creative gives us joyful times

KnowledgeIt's not about power, it's about wisdom. As you build knowledge and apply that knowledge so your life opens up wider

LaughterGoing out and doing interesting things gives us a good mood which makes it easier to find things to laugh about. Laughter adds to the wellbeing we feel

LearningWe find we are slowly and surely learning new things and growing this leads to a sense of meaning in our life

MemoriesMemories give us meaning. We remember who we are often through what we've done.

MoodGreat experiences alter our mood, which help us feel better and change the way our brains work. They make us more positive about our lives.

NeoThe word for new, our brain loves new things and new ideas, get out and discover your curiosity gene

OpenWhen we are open to each other and to other cultures we find our world expands and becomes exciting and inspiring

PromiseWe all have so much promise. Take yourself out and about and you will experience different sights and sounds, meet new people and enjoy new insights.

QuietReflecting on what's going on in the world gives us a welcome break from multi-screen stimulus

RelaxationEnjoying a day out fishing or pursuing any special interest can offer a fab way to relax and to recharge

RoamToo much of our lives are dictated by the clock, make time to roam again, without an agenda or a to do list

StrayStray from the norm, find places you don't normally visit and drop by, stand and stare for a while, notice what's all around you

TogethernessIs a warm feeling that comes from sharing a day out with family and friends

UnderstandingWhen we watch another and listen and learn we understand a little more about ourselves and those around us

VictoryWhether it's ours or another's there is a rush of euphoria that we feel when we experience triumph

WillingnessWillingness to go beyond our usual habits and routines breathes new life into our world

YouthfulThat's how we feel when we refresh our world through real life experiences on a moment by moment, basis

ZestThe life force that runs through us when we are excited by our place in the world