* "The lawyers have been arguing about the lighting for Sunday's planned field trip to the crime scene. F. Lee Bailey doesn't want any bright illumination that could make him look all washed up." (Jenny Church)

* "Carl Douglas requested a gate slamming demonstration at the scene. It's scheduled to take place right after the fishing expedition." (Brad Halpern)

* "Douglas said the defense was opposed to the crime-scene trip because it would cost too much. But he had difficulty arguing his point over the roaring laughter in the courtroom." (Peyser)

*

A beautiful young woman married a devoutly religious man, and for a while their marriage and sex life went well. But a few weeks before Easter, she noticed an abrupt halt to their bedroom activities.

When she pressed him for a reason, her husband replied, "I'm sorry, it's Lent."

"Well," the wife asked, "to whom and for how long?"

--James Haran, Huntington Beach

*

Redondo Beach reader Joe Rooney recalls that during the 1950s, when ice cream vendors sold their goodies for 10 cents, his children, Kathy, then 6, and Mike, then 4, were occasionally given dimes to go out and wait for the truck. One day, Kathy came back into the house, sobbing loudly: