Patches is my very beloved “Miracle-Kitty” and we both recently received a scare, requiring a hasty trip to the veterinarian. While that was bad enough, the ensuing waiting that proceeded nearly killed me.

Last Thursday evening, Patches disappeared from view as I watched TV. After a time, I paused to look around for her and found her gnawing on a piece of rubber band. Having previously kitty-proofed my house, I had no idea where she could have found a rubber band just lying around. Still, I grabbed the remaining two-and-a-half inch piece from her and went to my stash of rubber bands to compare it against others. I quickly determined that, based upon width and type, it would have originally been a six-inch round band. Given how she had energetically been chewing on that piece of band, I was fairly certain that my poor kitty had about four or so inches of rubber band in her stomach. I was mortified and scared all at the same time, and yet, she looked up at me as if to say, “Hey, get your own rubber band, dude.”

I rushed to the nearest galactic repository available…Google…and pulled up a dozen sites related to cats eating rubber bands.

I quickly discovered that such things could get bound up in a cat’s intestines, thereby blocking the tract, as well as proving fatal in some cases. Often, if not passed, a veterinarian might have to perform surgery, too. Of course, Patches seemed none the worse for wear and was both high-spirited and energetic. I began to worry and brood throughout the evening.

In addition to working through a terrible sinus infection, I barely slept a wink that night as I both felt miserable and guilty…and worried about what might happen to my poor Patches.

Early the next morning, we rushed to the vet, who examined Patches and found no overt signs of distress. Instead, she said to begin feeding Patches only wet food and watch her closely for signs of distress or pain, and watch her litter to see if she passes the band remnants over the weekend. If not, we were to return Monday morning for further action.

[Patches the Kitty Acrobat -- PHOTO COPYRIGHT 2016 BY JAZ PRIMO]

Friday was spent leaping up every time I heard kitty litter being shuffled about. Having two cats, that was a lot of activity, you can well imagine. Fortunately, Patches seemed unaffected and maintained a healthy appetite. However, while she urinated normally, she failed to poop. I kept petting and reassuring her, as well as played with her since she seemed her normal state of playfulness. She even perched atop a scratching post to pose for a photo (see above). In addition, she frequently perched on my lap as I rested on the couch watching old Doctor Who episodes (Tom Baker, in fact) or sat at my computer keyboard. And still, I waited.

We all know that “shit happens.” However, I’ve rarely wanted shit to happen so quickly before.

I dutifully examined the two kitty litter locations throughout Friday and Saturday, but by Saturday night, there was still no indication that poor Patches had pooped at all since Thursday. Fortunately, my other kitty, Tabby, is much bigger and about six pounds heavier than Patches, so the poop was markedly different, making my assessments relatively straight-forward.

*deadpan expression* I’m truly mortified to know this much about my kitty’s poop. I barely know that much about my own poop!

Okay, so Saturday night came and went, and as I lay in bed that night I wondered if Patches was headed back to the vet on Monday morning or not. Everything rested on Sunday.

By Sunday morning, I woke and immediately went to clean out the two kitty litter tubs. My hopes were answered when I found a whole folded-over four-plus inch piece of rubber band wrapped around poop! I was SO HAPPY that my Patches had finally passed that rubber band fully. Oh, my Sunday was a good day, I can tell you.

I made another pass through the house peering in corners and under furniture seeking other objects that she might swallow or be harmed by, but fortunately found very little. Like I said, I try to kitty-proof my house.

Believe me, I’m very relieved with how things turned out. But, in reflection of the entire event, I must reference a central character from my young adult paranormal romance novel, Gwen Reaper, in declaring that my weekend was simply “craptastic.”

Until later, enjoy life; be kind to those around you, and Happy Reading! Peace.