This is the first
Clutterance in a while and it is a long one. I’d like to express some thoughts
using Clay’s words.

There were so many
comments about how much Clay was enjoying himself during the Juke Box Tour.
If you read the reviews both in newspapers and from fans who attended it’s
a common theme…Clay loved being on that stage. Then there are the wonderful
quotes from the banter that happened at different venues:

Quote:

To men in
the audience: When they were enthusiastic – “It’s ok, you’re a claymate,
don’t be ashamed (Atlanta); It’s a fate worse that death – yuck – Clay
Aiken – sometimes I get sick of him!” (NH); “Do you listen to the wonderful
Clay Aiken CD’s in the car? – Me too! (Boston); “Ladies and gentlemen we
have a word for this but I’m not going to say it because you look like
you could beat me up – pretty much anyone does.” (Boston)

Screamed from
the audience – “I want you Clay” and Clay responded – “Well thank you,
I love me too – oh did I say that out loud?” (Rochester)

"You people with
cameras are crackin me up - That lady took 20 minutes to sit down because
she didn’t want her camera to jolt – because God forbid the clack skipped
around….yeah I know your words!” (Clio)

"I’m sweatin into
my eyeballs here…I’m going to take a break and probably going to have to
take a cold shower (audience goes nuts) …Maybe I shouldn’t have said that
huh? Ok let’s rewind – I’m going to go back in there and read a book."
(Cary)

“Then you’ve got
the skinny white boy who is funk free.” (Cary); “What are you lookin at
from the 2nd row with binoculars?” (Cary); “Who just said hurry up? Perfection
takes time honey!” (Merrillville)

"It’s all good.
There are people here that are going to be mad at me because I said that
and people that are gonna be happy I said that. You can never make anybody
happy altogether so I figure I’ll just speak my mind – why not.” (Clio)

“LA is such a
lonely city, the most desperate city in the world. Everybody here is concerned
with the wrong things, with their outsides, and everybody else’s outside,
and their insides rot.”

Some decided that
he was slamming ordinary people in LA. Whatever Clay heard on the boards
or from acquaintances after that interview was released caused him to restate
the obvious:

Quote:"I said I felt
people there put too much emphasis on the outsides and not their insides,"
Aiken says. "What I meant to say was 'people in the entertainment industry'
and I kind of generalized 'entertainment industry' as 'L.A.' and it came
out that way. I read it back that way and went, 'Oh, crap,' and it kind
of stirred a commotion amongst fans and whatnot, and that's nothing that
would ever have happened to me before."

"I'm surrounded
by people in the entertainment industry, not people that I work closely
with, but people in general in this business, who, sometimes I think their
priorities are wrong. But I just said it one way and now I look like a
jerk, and I didn't mean it that way at all. That's not the kind of thing
that would have happened to me as a teacher. I would have said something,
people would have realized what I meant and I would have moved on to the
next thing." (Pittsburgh Gazette)

The part of this
quote that stuck out for me was: “That's not the kind of thing that would
have happened to me as a teacher. I would have said something, people would
have realized what I meant and I would have moved on to the next thing.”

Clay has told us
many things about himself so I was a little bewildered that what he said
in the TV Guide interview was misinterpreted, after all he did say:

Quote:“It’s hard to
know who means well and who doesn’t. It makes it all the more important
that you stay true to yourself.” (LTS – pg.208)

"There have been
more trials recently than in my past life. I've had to fully rely on God
now than I have in the past. In the past, I would make decisions more hastily
and not have a problem with it, but now I take time to pray about it and
really think about it and try to see what's exactly best for me, what God
would want me to do, what my family would want me to do. It's hard to know
who to trust in L.A. God is one Person you can always trust." (2004)

Remember the Sewell,
New Jersey incident when Clay was being accused of treating kids in a poor
manner. This was not anything like the Clay that we knew – nothing like
Clay had always talked about. Later we learned that indeed it was all baloney
– and we also learned that Clay was hurt by the fact that he was accused
of something that was so anti his character:

Quote:The only downside
to his global celebrity is that it has made him a target for the tabloids,
which realize his face on the cover will sell papers. Not even someone
with his wholesome image is immune to their creative smearing. He's adopted
the savvy strategy of ignoring them, but one piece, which was sent to him,
was especially hurtful, he said. "One of them wrote I was working with
a children's choir last Christmas and I was rude to them. I've spent my
entire life working with kids, trying to help them." The only consolation,
he said, is, "I think most people didn't believe this story because it
was so preposterous." (Sun-Sentential – April 2,2005)

There are a number
of times that this has happened… Clay has been accused of things that are
not anything like the Clay Aiken as HE says he is.

Again, during the
Juke Box Tour, Clay gave some awesome interviews. In them there are tons
of personal things that he said about himself that are remarkably similar
to what he has always said. He is consistent and I think that should be
heeded – It helps in understanding just who Clay is. “IT’S MY SHOW reaches
a lot further that stage left or stage right:

Quote:"When people
are screaming at you on stage it's a kind of selfish fulfillment, that's
the only way I can think of to describe it," he says. "Who doesn't want
to have people love and enjoy what they do? But there's only so much you
can get from people telling you how wonderful you are. (Express Times 8/2005)

I love seeing
people joyful. It’s great to witness the effects of the music. It makes
the long drive to the next city that much easier when I know it will matter
to people that I am coming to sing. (LTS)

"There's a completely
different satisfaction in learning what there is to do to help other people.
I don't feel like my trip to Uganda is going to greatly change the situation
there. But even if it's a small change it was worth it." (Express Times)

Singing in front
of a stadium of fans is wonderful, but it pales in comparison to being
embraced by a child. (LTS pg144)

CLAY’S FAITH REMAINS
AT THE CORE OF EVERYTHING:

Quote:"I feel everybody
has a purpose on Earth and God has given each person a gift to improve
the surroundings they're in once they've discovered what that gift is,"
he adds. "So each person's purpose is for the glory of God and to better
our surroundings." (Express Times)

"I can see a clear
path of where God put me…..and how each experience, each situation …..
prepared me…. for the next one. It’s concrete evidence for me that God
has a plan and that it’s important to continue to have faith in Him and
His ability to guide my life and not to rely on myself or any earthly person
to do that…… where I am now is because of His direction and His guidance
(that) makes it a lot easier for me now to realize – well just give it
up and allow God to control what you’re doing in your life each and every
day. " (Interview on Learning To Sing CD)

"I look at this
gift as a stepping stone, or trait if you will, that I can use to ultimately
better things," he says. "I think the entertainment career in many ways
enables me to do more important things." (Express Times - 2005)

"I believe God
has a direction for me. He did not give me this life just so I could buy
a big house and an SUV. My job is to give back and to be a decent human
being no matter how many people cheer my name." (LTS)

"In church in
Raleigh, the congregation used to say, “Make sure you use your voice for
the Lord.” I feel that is what I’m doing. And I will continue doing it
until the Lord tells me to pipe down." (LTS)

KIDS ARE MOST IMPORTANT:

Quote:

"When I stand
out and look from the stage I see families and a lot of kids out there
and that's a big thing for me," he says. "I always thought I was going
to spend my life working with kids in some way. I know I'm not a teacher
when I'm onstage. But whether you're singing or dancing or acting, I think
you have a responsibility." (Express Times - 2005)

"I think there
are certain things I want to stay away from. I think there’s a lot of people
out there right now who necessarily may not portray the most wholesome
things. There’s a lot of people out there who I wouldn’t want my kids to
watch so whatever direction we go in I want to make sure that it’s something
that I wouldn’t be ashamed of – something I wouldn’t be ashamed to let
my kids watch" (ROLLING STONE PHOTO SHOOT INTERVIEW - 2003)

"Every single
person who is a celebrity, whether they want to or not, is going to be
watched by millions of people. They have a choice to make. They can either
make the choice to set a good example or make the choice to not care what
other people think of them. I don't necessarily care what other people
think about me, but I do make the choice to set a positive example all
the time." (BEAUTIFUL GIRL INTERVIEW - 2004)

TEACHING:

Quote:After Clay talked
about his travels this year for UNICEF this interviewer asked him it that
was the kind of thing that keeps him grounded: “To me it’s just an opportunity
to continue to do what I was doing before hand. I was a teacher before
this and had an opportunity to work with kids everyday. It’s the type of
thing that most days I wish I could go back to. (Clay then talked about
being jealous of his teacher friends and wishing he had the difficult child
to work with or the tons of papers to grade.) So it’s really an opportunity
to stay connected to what I always thought I wanted to do – well many days
still think I want to do. (WLEV100.7 – Allentown 8/4/2005)

"The foundation
is my future now. I feel that speaking out for others is the best way to
use my voice the rest of it, all the pop-star stuff is ultimately a platform
for giving back. And I have come too far to give up now. Resistance will
not deter me from what I intend to do, from what I see is my higher purpose.
I was planning to teach in a classroom. I am still teaching. My classroom
has just gotten bigger." (LTS)

LIFE GOALS:

Quote:

“I don’t like
to make that type of plan. I don’t like to make that type of goal. Everything
that’s happened to me so far has happened because I was opened to letting
God allow me to go where he wanted me to be and letting provident direction
drive and guide me. (WLEV 100.7 – Allentown, PA - 2005)

"Everyday you
look at where you are, and what you’re doing. And you think God put me
here for THIS reason. God made me meet THIS person for THIS reason. And
God has this in store for me. And there’s always just so many exciting
things, and so I just get excited about what’s next and what He’s got ready
for me and I’m just willing to take what He wants me to do." (KISS 98.5
Buffalo Interview (1/29/2004)

STAYING TRUE TO HIMSELF:

Quote:

" I don't want
to try to guess, I just want to be able to say I did it in the way I thought
was the most honest, the most scrupulous for not only me, but for those
around me." (Meadville Tribune 8/19/2005):

“It's important
for me to maintain my belief system in whatever I am doing.” (Reality TV
interview 12/2004)

I know that good
men do not stay good if they become consumed by ego…..I don’t want all
the good work I plan to do to be eclipsed by selfishness. I want to stay
connected to the right, real things – helping children, building camps,
training teachers………. (LTS pg 150)

“This is my real
life right now,” he says, dancing a little. “I’m not going to change who
I am. But I am concerned about how I handle myself. Will I be able to stay
open and friendly?” His smile drops and he looks for a moment, genuinely
sad. Then he smiles again. “You come back in five years. If I’ve become
someone else, you can look me up and slap me in the face.” (Elle interview
- October, 2003)