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4.28.2010

Man vs. Two Women

So, Haley went to work this morning and I was to go shopping. Last night we went over a list of things to buy at the store formerly known as Albertsons because they had a sale starting this morning. Haley's favorite kind of chocolate chips that are usually $2.50 for one bag were on sale for 98 cents a bag! Haley instructed me to buy 10 bags, enough to make her incredible chocolate chip oatmeal cookies for months.

I went to the store at 8:45 am and the shelf was almost barren! There I see a lady in her thirties with who I assume was her mother hoarding what was left. The ad said you can only buy 6 per customer. Well, these little deviants had a system of one lady grabbing six, going through the self-checkout station and running to the car to drop them off, then returning for more. So, as I'm standing there watching, I realize that there is only one more box at the far end. I remembered how much Haley LOVES those chocolate chips and I knew I couldn't fail her.The women looked at me with a gaze of curiosity. Then I lunged forward and took the whole box!! Then their gaze became one of disgust and honestly a little angry. They obviously knew I couldn't buy all twelve in the box, so they waited to see what I would do with the six extra bags. "Well," I thought, "two can play at this game."

So I continued shopping, then I found myself in the domestic area of the store. Nobody was around so I moved a big section of napkins for sale, stashed 6 of the bags, returned the napkins to their proper place and headed for the check-out. Sure enough, the women were still in the area. If they were men I would have worried they would jump me with the way they were looking at me. I bought my six bags, dropped off my chips in the car, then went back for more! I entered the store, bee-lined it to the napkins, snagged my other six bags and returned to the check-out area to rub it in the faces of those women.

So, I bought twelve bags of Guittard Milk Chocolate Chips for my wife and I'm pretty sure I seriously offended two women in the process. Ha! The joke is on them for trying to hoard all the chocolate chips.