1.25.2013

Deadlift Miracle

You go into it with an achy this or tweaked that, and feel so much better afterwards.Yes, all are welcome.

Deadlifts have delivered for my training friends and I. Through severely sprained ankles and knee irritation related to basketball and showboating. Through miscellaneous strains and a pectoral tendon tear and stuffy sinuses. Deadlifts have proven to be the perfect remedy for fatigue, fatherhood, academic and work stress, malaise, and undiagnosed bullheadedness.

Deadlifts are actually easy on the body. They're biomechanically sound, or in the "wheel house" as they say in baseball circles. Humans were made to pick things up and put them down, and time is no respecter of ligaments, discs, or menisci. So what are you going to do? Sitting around in the hopes of sparing yourself the osteoarthritis simply doesn't work. Your lower back would be fine if only you would peg correct form and respect the body's limited ability to recover, adapt, and push the limit.

Yes, I have hurt my back doing deadlifts. But deadlifts don't hurt people, people hurt people. That injury was a serious over-step on my end. Besides that, there's nothing to get you back on track to life and to deadlifts like a bit of rest and, well, deadlifts.

Runners high? Running and even mountain biking are merely gateway drugs to "dead lifters high." Go heavy if you really want to turn up the miracle. Seriously.

Going heavy is not for everyone. But let me tell you that ripping double (or greater) your body weight off the ground 20 or so times over the course of 20 minutes begins to strip the edges of reality. The gripping, pulling, and locking out opens the doors of PDS (Post Deadlift Syndrome).

Those suffering from PDS see the world as airy and light, both figuratively and literally. Burdens are lifted as iron is pulled from dead earth. Gravity dwindles and you traverse the terrain in astronaut bounds. You go about every small task with intent. You crush the pitcher of iced tea out of the fridge. The TV remote, the kitchen chair, the weed eater, every ordinary item is balsa wood in the hands of the Kraken.

It's not a good time to change the baby or play Legos. In truth, more than once I've broken dishes while under the influence of deadlifts.

Some would say this PDS is madness and others pointless. But I still call it a miracle. It fixes things in a very tangible way.