2011-07-06

On Being Tall but Not Blind

I realize I am tall. And when I wear heels I am even taller (really?). But apparently I crossed the acceptable line of female tallness when I wore these shoes because there was a lot of prune face going on when I walked by. Matt can vouch for that. It starts with the up and down, turns into a full on nose wrinkled, eyebrows raised and mouth pursed look and then the grand finale is the nudge to the person beside them to alert them to my freakishness. Maybe I ask for the glances or maybe I don't think that being tall should stop me from enjoying the footwear of my choice. The point of my story is that I would prefer getting the weird looks behind my back. Because even though I might stand a foot taller than you, I can still see you when you scrunch up your face and nudge your friend. The air is different up here but my vision is unaffected by the change in altitude.But I'm a big girl. I know people sometimes act insensitively. Years ago I was learning to drive standard and someone threw a Wendy's milkshake at me. I guess that makes me the inspiration for Glee.

how tall are you, Yen? My little sister, at 5'11" in flats always towers over me but I'm used to it. The two weirdest things when we're together is the people that remark that she's "sooo tall!" and I'm "so much shorter!" Yeah, we know. Thanks. Equally likely? People think we're twins. Maybe, in the Danny Devito/Arnold way but not very likely. When we say no we're not twins, invariably they'll always peg her as older. We're almost 6 years apart. *sigh*

I think tall people are like limos. Some people just can't see one pass them by without making a comment.

First, your outfit is gorgeous - the silhouette is super flattering. Second, I get comments about wearing heels that make me taller than a lot of my (mostly male) coworkers. I hate the expectation that I should be trying to make myself smaller because doesn't everyone know women are supposed to be tiny(er than men)?

You're gorgeous, you have amazing style, you look great in that outfit and shoes, people are jealous of your model looks and height. If I looked like you, I'd wear whatever I felt like. Maybe I should anyway, and rude people could just stuff their rude looks up their bums. Rock on, lady!

I love the colours in your striped skirt....and those heels I've been eyeing up FOREVER on Aldos website...and the price has slowly been declining...but I'm being way too practical by not buying them...sometimes I get "I have too many shoes" guilt, and somehow manage to not buy more shoes...my hubby would be proud

I was told just yesterday by a work 'mate' that tall girls shouldn't wear heels, as a girl of 5'11' and the proud owner of many pairs of stilletos/platforms/block heels - I patted him on the head, smiled and slowly walked away, with my head held as high as I could muster.

you are not big, nor are you tall( well maybe kinda tall but in a good way!), I think you are beautiful and your blog is fantastic!! who cares what others really think, everyone here loves your blog and also loves you!!!!www.jesscauseblog.blogspot.com

I'm 3 inches shorter than you (5'8") and STILL I get remarks whenever I wear heels. Always that vague comment (with prune face, great observation!) that's obviously not-a-compliment but not directly insulting either: "oh... you look so TALL today." Like when you point out a newt with two heads or potato that looks like a celebrity. It's not good, it's not bad, it's just... weird.

It took me years and years to get over my "I wish I could be shorter because I don't feel delicate enough" complex and finally embrace my height. I can reach things on the top shelves, kiss my fiance without getting up on my tiptoes, and if I gain 5 pounds nobody notices.

I know I speak for many of your readers when I say that you are gorgeous and a HUGE inspiration. Wear the heels with pride!

I'm 5'10" and I wear heels to work every day. In 6th grade my friend once told me "You know, if you weren't so tall, you'd be fat." I've never wished I were shorter, and have always embraced how long and lean we must look (with our giraffe legs, after all), especially in heels. You look fabulous-do your thing.-Audrahttp://audrasally.blogspot.com

I'm not as tall as you (shy by 2 inches) but I get comments when I wear my heals as well. Of course some of them make me over 6 foot... but i just keep on with the confidence and ignore the haters... they just wish they were that tall (or maybe they're wondering if you'll come over and dust their top shelf?)

Wow, there's a tall party in the comments! I'm on the short end of the tall spectrum, clocking in at 5'9", but I've never been ashamed of being tall. They used to call me Frankenstein and Bigfoot, but I was never embarrassed. Why should I be? That's the genetic lot I was given, and I was going to make the best of it. So for me, heels are go big or go home!

I did have a guy who I was sort of dating tell me once, "You know what I'd like? You'd be so much prettier if you wore flatter shoes." Gee, thanks.

I'm pretty sure you've already gotten this in the above comments - but im way too lazy to verify - but girls WANT to be tall. At a measly 5'1 (when i round up) I always look at tall girls thinking damn i need to chop off her legs and put them on me. Even though I will avoid standing beside tall people as much as I can, it's not because there is anything wrong with them, its because I feel like a midget. (cuz i almost am one)and ppl cannot be nudging their friends because you are too tall, that's just ridiculous. must be an ontario thing, u should move to montreal. (are u still visiting? ill make sure to buy some new platforms... KIDDING - sorta)i dont know if this comment had the desired effect and i hate to sound like everyone's mom when I say THEY ARE JUST JEALOUS. now let me lick my finger and fix that stray hair on your head.

Okay. You pulled me out of lurkerdom. My former (sniff, sniff, cry, cry) SIL was taller than her hubby. Her wedding photos were considered scandalous, because she dared to wear HEELS and stand taller than her groom.

He loved her tall, her long legs, the way they looked in heels, so... what's it to the rest of the world?!

I'm short. I hover at the edge of petite and just shy of "regular". No one looks twice when I wear higher heels, even though my hubby - like his brother! - is also pretty short...

I couldn't agree with this post any more! I am also tall, and every time I wear heels I get stares! Apparently there is some rule, ' must be below this height to ride' sort of thing, and the rule book seems to have skipped our houses! So be it, we shall wear our heels with pride!!

A WENDY'S MILKSHAKE?!?!?! Who are these people?!?!? Don't worry 'bout it baby. Girls/people who react that way to tall women are probably jealous and insecure. You look gorgeous as always and you are rockin those wedges. Totally worth the nose wrinkles.

I would bet money that they were just awe struck by how freakin' gorgeous you are! I am 6' tall and people look at me and nudge each other wherever I go whether I am in heels or not. I seriously have no idea what it feels like to feel "invisible" and people are always telling me that I am striking and beautiful and I should be a model (now that I'm older I don't the model comment as much lol). Maybe there are some people out there who find tall women unattractive (I have had my share of not so subtle rudeness especially by short women) but I think most people find it a very positive attribute. There is a reason that supermodels are our height you know. Rock on tall, beautiful Jentine!!

Tall is all a matter of perspective. I'm average (5'7") but always wear heels to make me "fit in" with my family. I'm dead shortest, and even in my tallest heels (5") my little sister is still taller than me when she's barefoot. (My dad is 6'7 and my mom is 5'11.)

It's not that you are too tall, even in your most fabulous heels. It's that the prune-faced people are just too damn short, they don't have any perspective. I say you stick your tongue out at them, or give them the once over and roll your eyes at their squatty height.

i'm glad you don't let it stop you from wearing heels. i live in el paso were everyone is about, oh, 5 feet tall. i'm 5'10 and when i wore my 4 inch stilletos to work i got a comment from everyone that i was too tall and someone even called me a "giantesse". it stopped me from wearing them. for now anyway. maybe when we move somewhere were the general populus is a bit taller i will again haha.

I definitely get comments from people on how tall I am when I wear heels, but thankfully it's always my family members commenting, and they're pretty nice about it! When I wear heels I end up being six feet tall and I feel like a giant, but I love heels too much not to wear them!

Sometimes a person is just tall (or small, or thin, or fat, or ....) and you just have to wear it with pride. And if you want to wear shoes to make yourself stretch up like a beautiful flower trying to reach the sun, so be it.

Werk those heels girl. You look fab! I am 6 foot, and I rock heels when my feet can take it. They make yours (and my) legs look great and they are a huge style thing, heels just look awesome. But, since you are so tall, it is easier to kick those people in the scrunchy face without breaking a sweat. So just think of kicking them in the face when they scrunch at you and you will feel tons better.

My dear friend is 6' tall and never wears anything lower than a 2" heel. She works in retail and says almost daily someone makes a rude comment about her height and shoes. She says she often looks down at them and said, "I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you from up here, you're so SHORT!" with a sweet smile and that usually shuts them up. Sorry you had this, you look fabulous and those shoes are wonderful!

Oh my God! Sometimes I hate people and their judge-y-ness! I have a very tall friends and FOR YEARS she allowed adorable heels to pass her by b/c she feared this type of treatment. Rock on your heels! They're just jealous anyway!

My mom (6') says that men considered it flirting in the early '60s to ask, "So, just how tall are you anyway?" Her reply? She'd just say "5 foot 12" and walk away.

My dad, at 6'4" never asked her that question. I figure, at 5'9" that I have to wear heels so we can all make eye contact.

I don't remember getting many negative comments, but in my high school and college years I grew very tired of having to tell people that, no I did not play basketball, and no I wasn't interested in learning. When I showed up for my student teaching gig at a small rural high school, I was recruited for the girls basketball team in the first ten minutes, before the coach realized I wasn't a new student!

I've dumped 2 guys because they said they didn't think I should wear heels at my height, and after ending it gone out and bought more shoes. I love being the girl everyone looks at, and when I catch a so-called "prune face", I just give my dimpled smile and keep rocking my heels. --Jessica (elephantsandowls.blogspot.com)

This boils down to the notion that women should take up as little space as possible and crosses over to the issue of weight as well. We should not tower too high or consume too much breadth in order to make others feel more comfortable and okay with the process of life...women small, men big. Its such an archaic ideal and yet so thoroughly ingrained into our society. Congrats to you for trumping the stereotype and being your own person...you have inspired me to start wearing heals (on my 6 foot frame) regardless of the other peoples concepts of beauty.

Oh sheesh, this is the story of my life, too - I can't even remember the amount of times the same thing has happened to me. What I most often hear is that at 5'11", I "shouldn't feel the need to wear heels", as if "need" is the main reason why other women wear high heels. Ugh.

But your outfit is stellar, the skirt looks wonderful on you, as do the heels. :)

My Mom is 5'11" and I'm 5'6.5" (you know how five year olds are really eager to tell you they are five and three quarters years old? Yeah... I'm like that with my height!). It's a competition for me to find shoes that make me taller than her. :) Us respectable shorties envy you!

Reading this post and all these comments is really wonderful - I never get to complain about this, but I do not like getting so much attention for my height.I always change the subject or just smile and ignore the comments, but it is ANNOYING. I truly admire and appreciate a lovely petite woman, or medium height gal, or any height! But I would NEVER say some of the things people say to me.

I'm another tall woman who does wear heels. I spent most of my life trying to be less noticeable, so it's difficult for me to take it in stride. And I keep expecting someone to ask me why I wear high heels when I'm already so tall (5'10") but no one has... maybe it is because I teach college, so my students don't want to say anything to the person deciding their grade... or maybe they just accept that their instructor should be taller than them!

I'm a shortie, so I can't really commiserate, but whenever I see a women over 6 feet (in heels or flats) I automatically assume they're a model! You look gorgeous everyday, but this outfit is one of my favorites!

"I'm a shortie, so I can't really commiserate, but whenever I see a women over 6 feet (in heels or flats) I automatically assume they're a model!"

Gotta say I agree! I'm a petite size and wear heels to work every day specifically to be taller. I like that 3" or 4" heels make me taller than some of the men that I work with. Makes me feel more powerful. If I were 6' I think I'd still want to be even taller! Being short sucks, especially when you need something from a high shelf. :)

Oh, my this is so familiar. I'm 5'8" but can totally relate to the nose scrunching and weird looks anytime I wear heels (and have you noticed the heels these days just keep getting taller and taller?!) Makes me uncomfortable and I find I rarely wear heels nowadays even though I love the way they make my legs/proportion look. After reading all these comments I feel empowered to break out my heels more often now and walk tall! Thank you ladies!

P.S. I so wish we could all get together and gang up on the rude shorties :)

How dare everyone assume that short women are jealous! I'm not even 5' and never once in my life did I wish I were taller. Did any of you even bother to think that the "prune faced" person was just a nasty, mean woman?! Why does she have to be jealous? Do you all really think that everyone wants to be you? How sad.

anon 8:29- This post was never meant as a tall person vs. short person rant not did I ever think that the looks were from jealousy. It's rare that I feel self conscious about being quite tall but on this particular day a lot of women were giving me nasty side eye. I wrote this post to comment on two things... first, that I can see the looks and nudges plain as day and second, that there is an idea that there is a maximum height that is 'acceptable' for females. Women come in many heights, shapes and sizes and though it's easier to say this than to live this, I wish we could celebrate that instead of feeling the need to knock each other down.

You are one hot inspiration for Glee, woman!! Those punks wish they were so lucky! ;)

As a fellow giant, I am mad impressed and inspired by your wearing of the tall, tall shoes. I was just oddly thinking today how comfortable and happy I was standing next to you, Kendi, and Jen in Austin, and how you and K looked amazingly twin-style beautiful in your tall heels and dresses. It sort of made me want to marry you, but then I remembered Matt. And then I cried. And then I smiled again, because you're tall. And then...well, you see the cycle.

I'm 5'9" and my heel height of choice is 3". I wear them all the time, even to work where I'm taller than all but one of the guys. They don't seem to mind :) The only time my long legs are a "disadvantage" is when my pants are never long enough for taller heels! That, and airplane seats....

I'm also 5'11" and even though I rarely wear heels, I always get the same once-over from complete strangers: they stare at my face, then they immediately drop down to my feet (checking to see if I'm secretly a stiltwalker, I guess). I'm 39 and at this point, it doesn't phase me at all, but it didn't exactly do wonders for my self-esteem back when I was a teenager.

I'm 5'11 and I refuse to wear heels under 4 inches. If I had a dollar for every random stranger who told me I was tall, and $2 for every random stranger who came up to me and asked, "You're so tall, WHY on earth would you wear heels?" ... well, I'd have a lot of money to buy more heels.

But in all seriousness, why do people think it's not rude to say things like that? It would be like me saying, "why are you wearing that color? it looks awful on your skin tone."

Anyway, this my first time reading your blog, and I must say, I am charmed! bookmarked :)

I love this tall convention!! I'm 5'10" and I love my heels. I actually like being taller than everyone else and getting stares (for my height as well as my cool style!). I've never heard a negative comment or seen a scrunchy face - and I also live in Ontario.... Hmmm....When I see tall girls in flats I always secretly hope that their choice is purely for comfort and not because they are ashamed or uncomfortable about their Amazon-ness. My adorable hubby is 4" shorter than me and he loves my long body!

I'm 5'10", and I absolutely love wearing crazy heels! The people at my parents' church would ALWAYS make that gross prune face at me when I showed up in 4" heels to Sunday services. And they would always comment on how I was so (freakishly) tall for an Asian girl. And how I was too tall to be wearing heels.

For a while I stopped wearing high shoes (because I was an overly sensitive teenager and didn't like the disapproving looks or unwanted attention), but eventually I just learned to ignore the peanut gallery. Thankfully, my parents never gave me grief about my footwear choices, and they let me trot around in the most ridiculous platforms my allowance could buy.

LOVE this post. I'm adding you to my blog roll. Back to this post - I'm 5'10 and the higher the heel the better! There is just something about wearing that heel that makes you feel longer and leaner (as if that is necessary). Love it! You have a new reader :)

Wow. So many tall confident women on here. I'm 5'11 and have never even tried a high heel on :(, I have always hated my height. I live in NM and people are very short here! I've never dated and feel very alone. Any suggestions on how you deal with looking different?

Very few men find tall woman attractive, if's a fact. Then you get men like me whom aren't particularly bothered as long as the woman doesn't dwarf me (I'm 5'9), I feel it has to be said though, if you are truly a 'tall' woman 5'10+ and you wear fairly large heels, it doesn't exactly send the right signals to men or woman. It makes you look like someone who has a height complex.

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