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You Can’t Always Be Captain Save-A-Hoe (Do You & Be You)

Now, from the title, you are probably thinking this is going to be about dating or something in that area….WELL, IT IS NOT! This is simply about you doing what you want to do and improving yourself. Back in the day, I was a Captain Save-A-Hoe but due to my mother fussing at me and telling me to enjoy my young years I have now evolved into someone who is doing them and being their true self. If you are still confused you will understand after reading this!

Being a Captain Save-A-Hoe in this context means you attempt to satisfy everyone or a certain someone to a point where you suppress yourself or you try to help everyone or a certain someone to a point where you don’t have time for yourself or the things you truly love. Now, that you have my definition I can openly admit to you again that I use to help and try to satisfy everyone. Why is that? The main reason why would be that I did not like when folks were mad at me or had a negative emotion. So I began to start SAVING….and Mama wasn’t having it. She knew at a young age that I was going to be this helpful citizen but not to the point where I would suppress myself and try to make that person better while hurting myself. You are either reading this to know how to stop being one or how to not to become one well here is how:

Allowing yourself to be comfortable in the things you love!

At one point I would think that if I indulge myself in the things that I love while I am supposed to be doing something that someone else loved I was being selfish! Dumb right? I know. What you like is what you like and you do not have to make an excuse to anyone about it. You’ll always have those friends that want to bring you to every single thing that they go to and take you away from your alone time or something that you want to do. If your thing is sitting in your underwear drinking strawberry milk while reading the latest erotica book….THAT IS YOU AND YOU NEED TO ENJOY THAT! Yea, it is cool doing stuff but what about the stuff you like to do. “You can’t be everywhere and be with everybody.” – My Mother

You have one life to live and this is not the Sims game where you can control someone else life. Be who you are and do not apologize for it. But as a disclaimer, this does not give you the right to be a totally negative person to someone just because you believe that is who you are…you just need to seek some help and let go of some bitterness. I digress, back to my main point you can’t suppress yourself for someone to feel better for themselves. There is nothing wrong with making someone feel better about themselves but you shall not stop your blessings because someone says, “you do the most.” If not that phrase they use something that makes you want to be on the same level as them. If it becomes a problem that you are successful and they are at the point in their life that they are not and they began to act funny around towards you….they were never your friends and you need to find some new friends. Be your wonderful self and press on with life!

It is a pretty simple concept to understand, right? Right. At the end of the day if you skipped to the bottom of this post just to see the conclusion here it is. Be who you are and do not apologize for it. You need personal time like anyone else. Do not and I repeat do not put yourself down to try to lift someone else up. You are blessed in many ways and you need to continue to walk in those blessings.