creativity, inspiration & every day exploration

Love is…a pen, journal, and lots of caffeine

So, it’s been quite awhile since I’ve been here. I had taken a hiatus that was both intentional and unintentional. An intentional move,in order to give myself some space from the pressure of always having something to say, and unintentional, due to some pretty tough physical and emotional experiences I’ve struggled through these past few months. Although I am pretty exhausted, I’ve managed to re-root myself and am committed to undertaking a ( -always in progress- ) journey towards a fuller health and personal self-growth. I haven’t been keeping track of my many moments of ‘love’ the past few months, but I have been feeling them in their fullness, and am so thankful for all of them. It’s all the moments, big & small, obvious & hidden, external & internal, that give strength. You just need to find the energy to discover them, even amongst the piles of pain, fear, and shit 🙂

This is where I’ve found love this week:

“Gezellig” – a Dutch word describing the (quite undefinable) feeling that “everything is right in the world” – as told by a Dutch friend after a really fantastic meal and a bottle of wine

getting a progress report at the chiropractor and seeing physical evidence that my spine/neck/nervous system has already improved leaps and bounds!

completing the entire yoga dvd (when I can actually bring myself to do it = bliss)

“But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless, and lonely is healing if you make it.

You can stand swathed by groups and mobs or hands with your partner, look both further and farther in the endless quest for company.

But no one is in your head. And by the time you translate your thoughts an essence of them maybe lost or perhaps it is just kept. Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those “sappy slogans” from pre-school over to high school groaning, we’re tokens for holding the lonely at bay.

Cause if you’re happy in your head, then solitude is blessed, and alone is okay.

It’s okay if no one believes like you, all experience is unique, no one has the same synapses, can’t think like you, for this be relieved, keeps things interesting, life’s magic things in reach, and it doesn’t mean you aren’t connected, and the community is not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it.

Take silence and respect it.

If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it, if your family doesn’t get you or a religious sect is not meant for you, don’t obsess about it.

oh wow, i love that dutch word! perfect description for how i felt last week. also, “looking up post grad certificates and programs, half for fun/half serious.” perfection. that is the best way of looking at things. i just sent a few emails to old professors i miss and am thinking of it that way: not asking for reference letters, just daydreaming a bit. hope you’re well sharon!

i’ve been missing some old profs too! i’ve been thinking a lot about our trent days lately. i’d absolutely love to go back to school, but at this point, i can’t justify the expense. i need to get out of debt first!

Thanks for link to my site! So glad you enjoyed the cupcakes! I’m baking the day away today but with some more traditional flavours. Dreaming of finding the perfect retail space that won’t break the bank! 🙂 Your post was absolutely beautiful, I’ll be back to read more! In Friendship, Crystal-Lee

No problem! It showed up in my stats. I was worried I seemed like a stalker :-p For some reason this username always posts back to a paranormal blog I did for an old group. Still trying to figure out how to get it back to my actual cake blog. 🙂 Have a great night!