The author is a Forbes contributor. The opinions expressed are those of the writer.

Loading ...

Loading ...

This story appears in the {{article.article.magazine.pretty_date}} issue of {{article.article.magazine.pubName}}. Subscribe

Whether you’re presenting on stage or networking at a trade conference, discussing a project with a co-worker or detecting someone’s lie, body language is often the key to creating, or uncovering, the real meaning of a message.

Body language became a significant part of your life long before you said your first word. In his book Silent Messages, Professor Albert Mehrabian concludes that 55 percent of communication actually takes place through body language. People intuitively and instantaneously develop a perception in the first moments they see you, and body language builds, confirms, or dispels those impressions.

With this in mind, here are a few feelings you may have experienced while watching other people around the office, or everyone else may have felt while watching you! Use this information to improve your understanding of the world around you and increase the effectiveness of your own credibility, communication, and negotiation skills.

You’re either lying, or incredibly nervous

Poor or no eye contact can be symptomatic of a lie, nervousness, or fear in Western cultures. Other signals include sweating, shaking, licking lips, and moving the hand to the face to cover the mouth or eyes.

Unfortunately, lying can sometimes be confused with a bad case of the butterflies, but it also makes perfect sense. When someone lies, they usually don’t have confidence in their message and their body reveals that. When you’re nervous, you just lack self-assurance and it shows.

Headed straight to the top

Charisma. Energy. Eye contact. Open body language. These are the signals of success, and of someone who knows how to communicate well with their body. They come up to you with an assertive handshake, can sit calmly while still exerting energy, align themselves with the room when speaking, and are in complete control of their movements and gestures. I talked about Anthony Robbins in my last post, and he is a great example of a person who has mastered these skills.

WARNING: contents are boiling

Imagine a person whose lips are pursed tightly, feet firmly on the ground, and crossed arms. You’re trying to have a conversation when suddenly he points a finger right at you and his face begins to flush red. This is the point where you either get ready for battle or look to defuse the situation as quickly as possible.

Yawn…

You can detect boredom from a mile away. When people go into standby mode, they tend to focus on the important things, such as drawing squiggles, staring off into space, or reading the words on their pen. Boredom is difficult to hide because it represents a conflict between one’s unconscious desires and physical presence.