Tahzeeb of Asad Ahmed Khan,Thank You note-11 (Page 5)

Page 5 of 22

crazy4KASH_ARIF-Sizzlerz

like he cant wear kurta to office she cant wear a salwaar to a disco well even if she did it just make her stand out of the crowd which she clearly dont want,if modern and old fashioned are decided by mentality not by clothes that can be taken in opposite way where if she is modern by clothes she still remain herself as old fashioned by heart just like she is modern by heart and old fashioned by clothesnot that i dont like him saying not to wear najma jeans infact i loved it soo much coz first we wont having this lovely discussion if he didnt said it..lol second it shows how protective he is towards his sister just like a father to this daughter who restricts many things which he thinks is not good for his daughter but make allowances some times just like he did when he wants her to go to new place but want her to come back before night and if she wants to go at night coz the damn place wont be open at night he still made allowance by dropping and picking her back and made another allowance but when she wanna change the way she is just to mingle with others he doesn't wanna make allowances to go that far,well even though the decision should be hers to make if it brings some experience of some bad thing or it being out her comfort zone asad wanna protect or prevent her from the experience which is quite awesome lovely topic

I don't deny with the fact that wearing jeans or not should have been Najma's decision.But if Najma decided to seek permission from her brother knowing very well his attitude then we need to understand that she is still Asad's baby sister.No matter how much freedom Asad gives her,at the end of the day she is looking forward to her bhaijaan only to make few decisions in her life.For her, it has been Asad who has played the fatherly figure in her life.Asad's mom didn't seem to have a problem with Najma wearing jeans but in this matter she kept silence because she too had faith in her son's decision.As much as I have understood Najma's character,she is still not enough capable of making major new decisions in her life.Unlike Asad,she always had her bhaijaan to guide her in every phase of her life.Asad had his mom but a father is as much necessary to a child as a mother.Fortunately, for Najma Asad is a fatherly figure.Noone is going to say anything if one wears Kurta to office first of all apart from giving weird looks for few times but then people can get used to it.There is no dress code for wearing suits in office for men as such first of all.Not all people who work in office wear suits.We have men wearing pant shirts which is another formal wear again.We see many women wearing ladies suits in corporate offices as well.Had wearing western formals been so essential,corporate offices must have been the first place to impose a dress code for women much before discos and all.

Personally,if you take me to a lounge and if I'm used to wear traditional clothes all my life,then honestly speaking I'm going to accompany you in suits only.No matter how many weird looks I get but I'm going to a lounge in suits only.I can't step out of my own principles and be comfortable and party at the same time.Wearing suits is not old fashioned dear.In which world are you?Just because women in the west wear apparels that are other than suits and sarees,it hardly means that suits/sarees have become old fashioned and don't fit in a place.Suits and sarees are formal wears as well and they have been made formals because of the cultural aspects of many countries.Again personally,I may go to US and UK and won't change my style of living so that I can fit into a place.I can't change my lifestyle for pleasing others.I will change my dressing sense if I grow fond of certain dresses and wish to try them.I'm not going to do this for any damn person or country or place or whatever.

Sometimes I feel that in this decision of Asad I could connect one of my personality attributes to Asad.And that is why I mentioned my personal point of view as well in relation to this topic.

Asad didn't like that Najma wanted to change herself for her friends and a silly lounge.As far as I have understood Asad,Najma is his beloved baby.Had Najma been a bit mature,she might have found a way to convincce her bhaijaan.At the first go noone can expect Asad to give her permission for wearing jeans owing to the reason she stated.If Najma really wished to get into that attire and wanted to do it for herself,I don't think after too much persistence Asad would have said no.He can't keep on keeping aside the wishes of his sister and must have eventually given in.There are few things in which he knows that he should better make a decision for his sister and there are many things in which he has given full freedom to Najma.Najma also understands this very well and that is why she turned up to her brother when she decided to change her outlook and get his permission.There is always a way to make others agree to your wishes.Najma seems a bit childish and she was unable to put forward her point properly according to me.*****************************************************************************

I liked your post a lot and I tried my best to clarify my point of view regarding Asad's decision.You can still disagree because at the end of the day it's my personal opinion.I'm happy that you found this topic lovely and worthy enough to put across your points so well.I'll be waiting for your reply.Take care!

crazy4KASH_ARIF-Sizzlerz

Very well written Asma and I totally agree to what u sed ! Asad was being a protective brother abiding the laws of Quran and there is nothing wrong wid tht , elder brothers at times are like that .

Very well written and great effort. :)

Thanks a lot Zara.I'm very happy to see you here and know that you could agree to my point of views.Well Asad has seen too much in his life.His protectiveness/over protectiveness for his sister is quite justified.

Thanks again dear for appreciating this effort of mine.I simply wished to make people look at Asad with a broader perspective and not just call him orthodox just because of a statement.I'm glad that many people could really understand my point of view like you.Take care!

Thank you so much dear for such a wonderful encouragement.I'm glad that I could provide you a little insight about Muslim culture.It's no nice that you could relate with Asad so well.Actually what Asad said can be pointed as Indian mentality as well but I specially highlighted Islamic culture because western outfits and Islamic women wears have always been a debatable issue.I simply didn't wish people to think about Asad as another Indian male patriarch conformist.It's really amazing how you have discussed the situation by putting yourself in Najma's place.Asad is without doubt a wonderful person.Thanks again for such an amazing feedback.I'm happy that we think of Asad in the similar way..Take care!Asma

lvd every bit of ur post.hopefully it may hv answered to many qs of da other members of da forum regarding asad n his values n beliefs...to sum it up he is a verycultured n religious guy n he follows vat he's taught

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@tm-kuddoos to u fr writing n clearing all da things...dis is defo one of da best n much neededposts of da forum:)

Thanks a lot dear for such a warm encouragement..I'm delighted to see that you could connect with my opinions so well.I was quite apprehensive about making this thread but you and all others have really faded away all my fears.I'm deeply touched to know that you feel that this thread is one of the most needed posts of this forum.Your feedback is so lovely to read.I made this thread so that people may not get wrong idea about Asad and call him orthodox just because of a single belief of his.Also,I related it with Islam to enlighten people about Muslim culture and let them understand that Asad is a very religious person and the reason behind is decision is obviously rooted in his values.I'm really grateful to you for such an amazing review.Thanks again.Take care!

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