1. Sadness

Walking down Diagon Alley, I realise for the umpteenth time what I'm missing out on. All the laughing friends and kissing couples, displaying their happiness for everyone to see.

Like anybody cares anyway. The war just ended for Merlin's sake.

Shouldn't we show some respect for the spilling of that much innocent lives? All my friends are dead, or in prison or they hate me. Which is really sad, because I didn't do anything wrong did I?

Alright, maybe I shouldn't have left His side at the final battle. But we were losing anyway, everybody knew that. So why not save my own life? He was a nut job, obviously, so why support him?

I have to admit, sometimes I wish I hadn't left. I wish I would've just supported Him and died or gone to prison. Then I'd probably see one of my parents, depends on which one of the two outcomes. And I would see my friends, and they would talk to me.

And not just ignore me like they do now. For instance Blaise, he went to Azkaban for about six months and came back like nothing happened. His business is running as well as it did before the war and he's still got all his friends, but me. He ignores me, just like everyone else does. It's like I'm a leper and would contaminate everyone I talk to.

That wouldn't have bothered me when my parents would still have been alive. But as I hinted before, they're not, not really anyway.

My mum died because of Him. He tortured her all night long, her screams filling the Manor, but leaving me useless, trying to safe her, but when I stepped in to safe her He crucio'd me. A living hell, if you ask me. When I'd gathered my wits again she was already dead. That's when I decided toleave. My father didn't, he actually helped Him kill his wife, because of her lying.

She was the only one who has ever really loved me. After her death I was like a ghost, I didn't mourn, I didn't cry, I didn't laugh like my father, but I didn't show any emotion at all. I was devastated, but I had to remain calm, otherwise He would know, and I would be dead too.

A week later I slipped out of the Manor and tried to find any member of the Order, preferably Dumbledore to get protection. He didn't die, I couldn't kill him, but neither did Snape. We let him go and he helped fighting the other Death Eaters.

The day after that was the first time I saw my father's true colours. When I got back to the Manor after the battle he was furious, and that all because I couldn't kill Dumbledore. He said that I had disgraced the entire family and that it would have even been better if I had died. That way I would have at least done something right. He was almost even more furious than Him.

He was not happy with me at all. Had me thrown into my own dungeons. He of course is V-Vol… You-Know-Who. I'm pathetic I know, but I'm still too afraid of him to call him by his own name. Luckily he's dead now, so he can't hurt me anymore. That time in the dungeons was the worst of my life, except for the day Mum died of course, but those days were a living nightmare.

He would let me out everyday, so I would get my hopes up that I was finally released and then he would torture me and make fun of me until I passed out.

Luckily, after a while he got bored with that, and he'd lost too many followers to miss any of them. So I was let out of my cell, skinny as a skeleton to fight for him. Like nothing had ever happened, like he hadn't tortured me, I was supposed to fight for him.

Not even a week later he killed Mum and I declared myself sideless.

Walking down Diagon Alley isn't healthy for me, because of all the bad memories that surface every time I'm here. I should just Apparate to work, but the house elves, my only so-called friends tell me I need some fresh air every now and then. But I can't help thinking about everything that happened here, every time I went here with Mum and father, him tagging behind talking to his companions, not friends, they were just for business.

Luckily, father is in prison, he did nothing to get me out of prison, so I'm not going to help him. He'll just go even madder than he used to be. Last time I saw him, at Mum's funeral after the war, she wasn't properly buried because of Him, he looked haunted. Like every minute someone would hex him to the next century, like the funeral didn't matter and like he hated me. Which he does, of course, I didn't expect anything else when I joined the other side. He already hated me before I was born. He never loved me like Mum did, he just wanted me because I might be good as an heir or a Death Eater. I'm neither, so he hates me.

At the funeral he tried to disown me, but he couldn't, because there was no-one else who could watch his property and business, except for me.

So I have to lead the family business until he gets out of prison, which won't happen. Not that it's such a profit making company, I barely make enough money to pay the bills and taxes and get food for myself. If it would go even a tiny bit less I'd go bankrupt. Then I would probably die, because I'd never get a job, nobody would hire me. I'm a traitor for everyone from His side, who isn't in prison and I'm a Death Eater for everyone from the Light. I have to think of a way to promote 'Malfoy Enterprises' to not go bankrupt.

Ginny POV

When I was asked to join the Holyhead Harpies, my first reaction was shock. I couldn't believe they would ask me. When the initial shock had passed I was so happy! It was the happiest day of my life. Even winning the war couldn't top it. When I think back to it I should have seen it coming. I was a girl, I was pretty good at Quidditch and my first name begins with a G.

I really love the team. We all helped each other get over the loss of friends and family members, that's why we're so close. We'll support each other through thick and thin and love playing together.

The memories of the war still haunt me, and I'll never stop missing Fred, but I can move on with my life. When I was asked to join them, I said yes because I knew that's what Fred would have wanted me to say. But now, I'm very glad I did even though at first I really couldn't stop thinking about the dead. I really love Quidditch.

But now I don't know what we'll do. The conversation I'm zoning out of at the moment is about what to do about the fact that we don't have enough money now that our last funder went bankrupt. They really needed money, otherwise they would have to quit. She knew it was hard to get a new funder, because they were an all girls team. Most wealthy males thought they wouldn't stand a chance against a normal mixed team. Typical male behaviour by the way.

Another reason is the war. Because of the war people had to stop working and the economy plummeted. There were few companies with enough money to spare, to fund a Quidditch team, but they want to keep the money to themselves. I could ask Harry, but I don't want him to fund the Holyhead Harpies, he's just getting over the trauma caused by the fighting and all the time spent in hiding.

He could just live normally, he still couldn't work, that would be too much stress. Let alone spend all his money to fund a Quidditch team, that would cause him even more stress.

But back to the conversation, it seems like they reached a conclusion. "So we agree to write letters to all known businesses in England?", Gwenog Jones said. She's the Captain and a hell of a beater. I used to be a fan, but I got over it and now we're very good friends. We all mumbled a quick "yes" and stood to leave.

She will probably write the letter and duplicate it magically. In the locker room I heard the other girls talking about a couple of businesses, because apparently Gwenog asked us to look for possible funders. After a quick shower, I said to the other girls that I would meet them tomorrow. While I walk home I try to think of a business or a person that would fund us. I really can't think of any… Just the basic ones, but we already wrote to those.

I should probably take a look in Diagon Alley, otherwise I won't know any new companies. I really don't want to quit playing Quidditch and stop meeting with the girls on a daily basis. I apparated to the Burrow. Yeah, I know, I'm still living at home. Here I don't have to do my own laundry and I don't need money to rent an apartment. I haven't gotten a good pay check for weeks.

When I walk into the kitchen I drop my bag on the floor and kick it in a corner. When I look up from scowling at my foot because it hurt from kicking my bag, I see my mum watching me, looking a little concerned. She had reasons enough to be concerned, normally I'm not this sad, self pitied and angry at my bag for no apparent reason.

"You're early", she said, after drying her hands on her apron and putting the now clean plate on the table. I shrug and sit down at the table and put my head on my crossed arms in front of me. When she sits next to me, looking even more concerned, I sigh and try not to look too depressed.

"What's the matter?"

"I don't know mum, I've just had enough."

"Had enough? Why? Of what?"

"I don't know!" I yell at her, again for no apparent reason.

She flinches, but keeps interrogating me. Why can't I just be alone and sad for just one day, without everyone questioning me. Look at Hermione, when she's pissed, nobody notices. Not really anyway.

She keeps looking at me with that scary, agonising look, like: I'm your mum, I have to know everything about you, even if you don't want me to.

I really am depressed today, thinking that about m own mother. Feeling slightly (alright very) guilty, I put my arm around her and say: "The Harpies are almost as dead as a dodo." I know, it's a Muggle saying, but I like it, mostly the dodo part, it just sounds funny!

Now it's her turn to sigh, "Well, you could always join another team…" I look at her, my eyes widen in shock at such a horrid prospect. "I would never do that! You know that, don't you? I will keep loyal to the Harpies forever. As does everyone else on the team." She sighs again and stands up, I stand up too, and we look each other in the eyes.

After a while of this staring contest, she puts an arm around my shoulders and hugs me.

"Well, I wish you luck with finding a new funder, you'll need it." I smile watching her face light up with one as well, which really makes her look younger. All the worried wrinkles gone and her eyes alive with joy.

"I'm going to Diagon alley to look for any possible funders, but I'll be back in time for diner", I assure her. With one last wave I Apparate to the Leaky Cauldron, where I start looking for rich and/or powerful (wo)men.

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