Attitude

“The disability is not the problem. The accessibility is the problem.” – Mohamed Jemni.

Not always accessibility but rather, attitudes.

A friend shared this earlier which helped me to appreciate yet correct it a bit further… since the out-dated term “Deaf-mute” was used in my presence earlier this week, this left me feeling speechless. If an elderly person had said it, I would not have minded so much but she was thirty ish.

A couple of years ago, my daughter kept asking a good friend of hers to come round after school. Her school friend desperately wanted to come but it soon transpired she was not allowed to. This disappointed my daughter greatly so. Upon enquiringly why her friend was not allowed to come, it transpired that her parents thought I was incapable of looking after her, “It’s dangerous” – simply because, of my deafness.

I could not believe my eyes at the time, what I was lip-reading…

After disclosing it to close friends and seeing their reactions, none of which was very constructive, I decided my best option was to contact the parent support advisor from the school and explain how unfair it was, that such an attitude was preventing two good friends from some quality time together, outside of school. I received a prompt yet agreeable response – they obviously educated the mother as her daughter was eventually permitted to come round.

Two years on, except this time her mother cannot pick her up so she subsequently asked me to drop her off home. I was happy to do so and agreed, “Fine!…” She paused and sensing her bout of contemplative hesitation, I decided to smile to put her at ease.

She turned to my daughter and told her, “Get your dad to bring her home…”

Hmmm, I did not know what to think or feel but to let it be. At least, the girls were happy… Slowly but surely, it is at least an improvement on the age old attitude, two years before.

Even though her home is within walking distance, there is no danger whatsoever.

Yes, deaf people can drive (shock horror!). I once had a friend who had no choice but be driven home by my (deaf) mother. He was rather nervous at that. Come to think of it, my mother also smiled….