In the wake of the news.

Pointless feud could be spark Cubs need

We here at the Tribune, in our never-ending effort to help the Cubs improve, will often give advice to our corporate cousins.

The team's lack of emotion has been a recent theme in these pages, but I'm happy to report that signs of life have been detected.

Third-string third baseman Chris Stynes, upset over something that was written about him in the newspaper, threw two balls at a Tribune reporter before Thursday's game. Predictably, the throws from third were off-target, but at least we still can count on Stynes' .217 batting average. And at least the guy cares about something, even if he is doing his caring from the end of the bench.

We Tribune people can't do it all in the motivation department, however. Sometimes it takes some bonehead comments from a St. Louis pitching coach to get the (bad) blood going.

On Wednesday, after the Cubs lost 3-2 to the Cardinals, Dave Duncan accused Cubs coaches of tipping Sammy Sosa to the location of Matt Morris' pitches. Sosa hit a home run in that game. The good news, from a Cubs adrenaline standpoint, is that the two teams start a three-game series Monday in St. Louis and that Morris is scheduled to pitch the first game.

"Somebody might get a fastball in the ear on Monday if that's the way they want to do it," Morris told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

Somebody needs to put Morris in touch with reality. He might want to consider the possibility that he made a mistake and Sosa, fairly experienced at this hitting thing, made him pay for it.

A question: If the Cubs are stealing signs, why aren't they sharing them with Stynes, who has one hit in his last 20 at-bats?

The fact that the Cardinals chose Sosa's at-bats as the time to conjure up a spy in their midst borders on the bizarre. He was 1-for-5 in the series with seven walks. Somebody isn't stealing signs very well.

Cubs manager Don Baylor should be thankful for Duncan's temporary insanity, though, because it just might help raise the dead. This is the sort of thing that can bring a club together like no team meeting can. Who cares if the feud is an artificial stimulant?

"I don't know how to respond to paranoia," Baylor said, just warming to the challenge. "It's trying to take away the reputation that Sammy has built. He's the only player in the history of the game to hit 60 home runs three different times.

"You could say the same thing about another one of [their former] sluggers too."

Mmmmm. You wouldn't mean Mark McGwire?

"Is that what they're saying? That they helped McGwire?" Cubs third-base coach Gene Glynn said innocently. "They must know how to [steal signs]."

Cardinals manager Tony La Russa is a known irritant, so no one should be surprised he would try to concoct a controversy. All you need to know about La Russa is that one of his best friends is Bob Knight, who thinks a wild hair is a fashion statement. These guys could see a conspiracy in a quilting bee.

As Baylor rightly points out, how dangerous would it be for Sosa to anticipate an outside pitch if the pitcher accidentally comes inside with it? How would a coach feel about a star getting a face full of horsehide?

Sosa seemed to be trying to decide between anger and hurt over the accusation.

"I'm not the kind of player to go out there and look for help," he said. "That's why it bothers me."

La Russa is famous for playing mind games. Baylor had warned Cubs players before the St. Louis series that La Russa would try to get into their skulls and to ignore it.

"That's how Tony tries to do it with everybody, which is fine," Baylor said. "That's no problem. . . . I like it."

If the Cardinals were the Cubs' archenemy before, what are they now? Their overarching archenemy?

The Cubs need to decide their future. They looked mild and meek in a 9-4 loss to woeful Milwaukee on Thursday. They need to bring up Bobby Hill from Iowa to replace second baseman Delino DeShields, who went 0-for-4 against the Brewers and has slipped below the Mendoza line. They need to bring up Mark Prior. They need to get a faith healer to help Moises Alou, who is hurt again.

They need to decide if this challenge by the Cardinals, this call to arms, is something that might get their blood boiling. Or is a few weak throws by a bench warmer the best they can do?