Mmmhh. On “mature reflection” I might need training on No. 6. Also half of the course on No. 3. I always lift the seat but often still miss – usually to the right strangely…(too much detail????, LOL!).

I’m delighted that no course on ironing exists this winter….YES!!!! You see I got a burn mark from ironing years ago and I’m psychologically unable to return to it.

I would like to enrol DrummerBoy for all 10 classes please and should Ironing for Dummies,Lawnmowing 101 or Acquainting Yourself With Laundry Applicances be offered at a future date, please email the timetable and start times.

I have already graduated from course no 3 and this year am taking up a masters degree in the subject which will specialise in “Is it possible to start urinating while the toilet seat is down, realise your mistake and try and lift the seat without breaking the flow ?”

I am practicing every day now and have almost found the optimum velocity at which you lift the seat and yet avoid the worst of the rebound splashes.