Freed from the specter of spectacles

By Mike Foley

Posted:
08/09/2013 10:44:12 AM MDT

I don't think she knew she had a problem; at least not until her fourth-grade teacher told her mother: "She can't see the blackboard, ma'am, she has to walk up to within a foot of the board, and then has to squint to see what I've written on it."

It was news to Mom, who replied, "It's just because her cousin has glasses, and she wants a pair too."

The teacher convinced the doubter, and an appointment was made with an optometrist. On the fated day, she was taken in hand, and delivered to the dispenser of optical correction for an exam, and when it was completed, the diagnosis was given: "She is nearly blind, missus, and you must keep an eye (is that a favorite phrase of opticians?) on her vision."

She was fitted with glasses, and the well known "Coke bottle" lenses became part of her look. Not too tragic for an 8-year-old, but as she matured and became a teenager -- a beautiful teen I might add -- those specs did nothing for her looks.

During those high school years she was gifted with a nickname: "Magoo" taken from an extremely nearsighted '50s cartoon character, "Mr. Magoo."

She became a cheerleader, but wasn't elected because of how she looked with her glasses, not on your life. They were hidden away lest they be spotted by a classmate. She'd take her chances, and continue to make those trips to the blackboard -- she never revealed how many toes she stepped upon on those treks.

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Those closing words of the eye doctor continued to haunt her: "She is nearly blind." And they returned to worry her for most of her life, especially when she needed new glasses, for she dreaded the day when she would be told that she was going blind. In her mind, "no news was good news," and she wasn't going to tempt fate -- tempt fate with unnecessary trips to the optician. So, she wrung the last bit of use out of every pair of glasses.

In her 30s, she was fitted with contact lenses -- vanity and vision were at last at peace with one another. And each time she made a visit to an optical inquisitioner, she was surprised to never hear that she was going blind.

All went nearsightedly well for many years, until a few months ago when those hated Coke bottle lenses no longer worked. It was obvious that she needed help.

She scraped up the courage to visit the ophthalmologist. And it did happen; she was blind, with severe cataracts on both eyes. But, there was good news; her blindness could be cured. Her coke bottle lenses were to be a thing of the past.

Loveland's own Dr. Jennifer Cecil was the miracle worker; she restored Magoo's sight, and now, instead of 20/400 vision, she now sports near perfect sight. A miracle.

If you're still wondering about Magoo -- she became my wife -- my big concern now is will she keep me now that she knows what I look like?

Mike Foley is a Loveland retiree. Read more from him on his blog at reporter-herald.com. To find it, click on blogs in the index at the bottom of the home page.

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