Friday, February 5, 2010

You'll go snowblind watching this month's movie!

Happy February, HMN friends!

As part of our outreach program to help you all get through the corporate obligation that is Valentine's Day (the day, not the movie -- although you may need counseling for that, too), we offer this month's horrible movie -- the 1988 ski slope slasher, "Iced".

This stinker takes place at a ski resort, where a gaggle of idiots (who are almost always photographed like they're posing for a group photo) take in some skiing, drinking, and shtupping. When one of the fellas loses his girl to a rival, he vows revenge and angrily takes to the slopes, dying in the process. Or does he --? Four years later, the same group is mysteriously invited to a time-share ski weekend, where they are picked off by a ski-masked killer. Hmmmmm.

The screenplay was written by one of the actors (his first and last), and it also features Lisa Loring, who played Wednesday Adams in the original "Addams Family" TV series, who gives us some serious nakedity. What would Cousin Itt say?

There's some wonderful ridiculousness in this film: a man not able to find reverse on his car, nude cocaine use, a clairvoyant real estate developer, and the most hilarious carrot eating scene in the history of film.

As always, the killer Omelettes will perform improv at the halfway mark of the movie, and during the end credits. Your host is Tom Winkler, creator of doodie.com, and Don'tWhackYourBoss.com -- he will lovingly guide you through this cinematic sweat lodge.

We sold out last month's show, so if you want a seat, show your ass up early! It's limited seating. We will be upstairs at the Flight theater this month -- there'll be plenty of signage to guide you there. Beer, wine, water, and all manner of treats will be available at our horrible concession stand.

And there will be prizes awarded for the best quotes yelled out during the performance. Get on our mailing list (horriblemovie@pacbell.net), or Facebook, or Twitter if you ain't already. We'll look for you at the theater!