Greens call for horse lanes

The Green Party today called for horse lanes to be introduced in New Zealand towns and cities.

“We need to look for carbon neutral transport options to fight climate change, we appreciate that not everyone has the fitness level to cycle, and that think that horse lanes could be a balanced and workable solution,” said Russel Norman, Associate Green Party Horse spokesperson today.

“Getting people riding to work has a number of advantages it would reduce carbon emissions, create jobs in the horse industry, get people exercising, and produce manure that can be used in municipal gardens.

“Horse lanes are a win-win-win-win proposal; that’s four wins which is a lot,” added Dr Norman.

“As part of getting people back into work, the Government could introduce horse training for beneficiaries. John Key’s Government seems intent on making beneficiaries jump through as many hoops as possible – it’s only fair that they be provided horses to help with this.

“That makes it five wins for horse lanes, which is huge. It’s a lot higher win ratio than the Government usually requires for roading proposals,” commented Dr Norman.

“I’m quite excited by the possibility of more horses being ridden to work – they’re beautiful animals and I would definitely ride one if I had the chance,” said Dr Norman.

Greenfly-When I say “working on” I am using the Nationalese definition which is; seeking advice and replicating countries where such experiments have failed. Obviously I don’t have much hope for a successful outcome for my genetically altered horse, however, this approach doesn’t stop our government, why should it stop me? The country will be over run by these genetically changed horses that will actually be hazards to society, but I don’t care because I feel I have a mandate to do what I want.

Flash – John Key has gone one better and announced a National Horseway that is expected to create 5 million jobs, lift our standard of living above Australia, and promote the growth of hair on Rodney Hide’s head.