A week ago, we’d suggest that Bush use this video of self-righteous celebrities pledging to do awesome things in the name of Barack Obama as an enhanced interrogation technique against terrorists, but since we’re not doing that torture thing anymore, we’ll just make you watch it. Celebrities, listen the fuck up– we do not want to see you in front of a camera telling us how awesome you are and saying, “Dude, if you want to be cool like me, you better buy a hybrid and end slavery.” We know you wake up every morning and recite your daily affirmations in front of the mirror, but reciting them to the general public just makes us hate you. Watch the celebretard self-love fest after the jump– if you dare.

oh blah i relly shuld have listened to your warning
I couldn’t make it past 1.30 mark
I hate celebs especially the useless ones like Nicole Richie that don’t do anything :(

Jan 23, 2009 at 11:38 am · @Reply ·

atarshster

“use less plastic”??? I assume that doesn’t include plastic surgery?!

Jan 23, 2009 at 11:42 am · @Reply ·

Jon B

WTF?!?!? Why is this never ending? I pledge to be more understanding of my self-indulgent celebrity brothers and sisters who feel the need to make hollow promises in front of a camera so they feel connected to our new President.

Jan 23, 2009 at 11:52 am · @Reply ·

IAWrangler

I pledge to not join â€œeveryone who hates Hollywood.â€ I might be wrong but I believe no one in this video said, as you quoted, â€œDude, if you want to be cool like me,…â€ My wish for you, Queerty, is that you will choose to stop hating and insulting human beings.

Jan 23, 2009 at 12:25 pm · @Reply ·

Alexa

Should this really be listed under the “celebrities” tag? I didn’t know who half of them were.

Jan 23, 2009 at 12:48 pm · @Reply ·

Joannie

Only a third of them are disgusting oblivious obnoxious narcissist. It’s not completely loathe-inducing. Let’s take some good out of it even if they may not necessarily.

Jan 23, 2009 at 1:12 pm · @Reply ·

Paul

Eh. It IS horribly annoying. But at the same time, at least they’re promising to do something other than get Starbucks and wear big sunglasses. Maybe in some (small) way it will inspire others to do public service.

This is exactly why I have stopped watching the Academy Awards, now for about 10 years. I only click it on when it’s about time during each program to watch the Tribute to those who passed on and to see which movie won Best Picture. If the Hollywood elite care so much about politics, why don’t more of them run for office like a very short list of Hollywood actors and actresses have and I admire those for doing so, win or lose. I was out visiting my cousins in AZ at the time Babs was calling radio stations to get out the Demo Vote. It was sickening. I’ve never watched a movie that she has been in since, let alone her music. When either come on I click to another channel or station.

Jan 23, 2009 at 1:29 pm · @Reply ·

ChicagoJimmy

Don’t they pay celebrities to endorse products? That seems to sell gym shoes, sun glasses, soda pop, clothing, vacations, cars, etc. What’s wrong with getting some celebrities to make a PSA? Do you people have a problem with volunteering or being of service to someone that needs it?

Remember the line “We’re the one’s we’ve been waiting for” that our new president threw out during the campaign? He meant stop bitching and start doing something.

I suppose these folks could have spent their time shopping, getting a massage, filming another really stupid reality show, or getting paid to advertise a product no one wants or needs. Instead these people are using their celebrity status to try to get a few Americans to pitch in on getting the USA back where it’s supposed to be.

While I certainly don’t think this spot will solve all of our problems (and yes, some of them are self-absorbed) I still don’t see anything wrong with it.

Jan 23, 2009 at 2:03 pm · @Reply ·

ChicagoJimmy

@Lyndon Evans: Why would anyone have to run for political office to be involved? I’m guessing if any of these folks did win, you would be here bitching that they are just running because they’re celebrities.

Do you react so harshly to celebrities who SELL themselves to advertise products? What’s wrong with someone standing up and saying, “I like this guy and I’m going to vote for him, you should too,” and how is that any different than me talking with my neighbors or co-workers? Barbara Streisand’s opinion can be discounted just as easily as mine can. Did you throw out all your Michael Jackson records when he started selling Pepsi?

Jan 23, 2009 at 2:11 pm · @Reply ·

blake

Obama is a politician. I have no illusions about him. I doubt any of the older celebrities do either. He’s just one man. Some of the video is fluff, but the intentions are good. If you approach everything cynically, the world will be crap.

Take a step back and look at the patriotic hoopla that Obama’s inauguration has generated. The good will that has occurred is incredible P.R. given the level of anti-Americanism worldwide.

For 50 years, the Right-wing has portrayed those on the left as unpatriotic, America haters. The video is filled with lefties who love America, talking about how they “pledge” to do good things for the country. And that’s a bad thing?

If a bunch of celebrities proclaiming their love of their fellow humans, the U.S., and the planet Earth can hurt the Right in some small way then go “Hollywood”!

How often do we see the gay media go “Cookoo for Cocoa-Puffs” when some straight celebrity announces his or her support of the gay community? Wasn’t there some coverage on Queerty about anti-Prop 8 comments by celebrities?

There are other causes that could use celebrity assistance, like slavery. As much as Americans don’t want to acknowledge it, slavery exists secretly in the U.S. and openly in other countries.

P.S.
Did you see Soleil Moon Frye? 1(M):44(S) in to the video.
Whatever happened to her next door neighbor Cherry Something-or-Other?

Jan 23, 2009 at 2:20 pm · @Reply ·

Michael vdB

Maybe it might prove hollow but it is a start.

Things like turning off your lights when you are not in the room. I always did that growing up but it was amazing how many people don’t. Maybe we can’t change the world all at once, but everyone can help in some way.

Jan 23, 2009 at 2:28 pm · @Reply ·

gayvirgo

ok. I will admit it is a bit much. But…what if they all actually did what they pledged to do? Wouldn’t that make a difference in this world? And what if their message reaches one or ten or one million? Wouldn’t that make a difference in this world.

I am surprised by the hard-bitten reactions of everyone. What better way for them to use the platform that is their celebrity than to call for, and hopefully lead, a change.

I pledge not to be so cynical and not to judge others who are trying to do something to create change. Even celebrities.

Jan 23, 2009 at 3:38 pm · @Reply ·

Alexa

@gayvirgo:
Good point. I am suitably chastised. I still don’t know who half of them are, but at least they’re trying to help.

Jan 23, 2009 at 4:41 pm · @Reply ·

Jaxson67

i pledge “i am going to throw up”

Jan 23, 2009 at 5:40 pm · @Reply ·

sal

i pledge to support equality for all,Obama can i hear u on that one??…oh wait thats right words are just that WORDS!!!!Celebrities Dont tell me show me,i would love some of that millions u make from polluting companies who pay u to endorse em and that cash u make that u spend on vacations to put recycling bins in my neighborhood.oh wait did you guys go silent???lol lol

Jan 23, 2009 at 5:40 pm · @Reply ·

AzGaybe

i pledge to have another drink

Jan 23, 2009 at 6:17 pm · @Reply ·

gkruz

@ChicagoJimmy:
I’m proud to say that I never bought a Michael Jackson LP, CD, cassette or anything else in my life. Some of us spent the 80s listening to real music.

Jan 23, 2009 at 8:43 pm · @Reply ·

gkruz

@Paul: Yeah, like Matt Damon and the other Hollywood trendies who were advocating reviving the draft because they claimed the all-volunteer army allowed the rich to avoid their stint in the military. Matt Damon, millionaire movie star who never served a day in the military and never will, thinks bringing back the draft, which the Left rioted in the streets to abolish in the 60s and 70s, is somehow progressive. Actors shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

I couldn’t make it past the opening music – I didn’t even get to the celebrities.

But the thing is, I never would be exposed to something like this, as I don’t follow this sort of media except at one remove, as here. For its intended audience it may be just fine — words of wisdom from Britney Spears are perfectly designed to improve the character of people who, you know, want to watch Britney Spears talk.

Jan 23, 2009 at 10:26 pm · @Reply ·

schnaussmaus

Japhy – why don’t you drop the cynicism? It’s funny that you wear your disdain as “coolness” as you rip these public figures for trying to talk about something positive.

Jan 24, 2009 at 12:51 am · @Reply ·

Me

I tuned out at 1:15 – no matter how hard he tries, Ashton Kutcher always sounds disingenuous.

Jan 24, 2009 at 7:32 am · @Reply ·

Charles J. Mueller

Is this video of Hollywood movie actors suggesting to us what we should pledge to do really any different from the religious right telling us what we should do? Why don’t people simply clean up their own back yards before looking over the fence and commenting on what their neighbors should be doing?

In other words MYOFB.

I’m sick to death of other people telling me how I should live. What give them the right?

And make sure that we replace all of our light bulbs with CFs filled with mercury from China. Oh yeah. Very patriotic!

BTW, speaking of turning off light bulbs in rooms not being used. Just how many of these celebrities live in a two bedroom tract-house like the rest of us ordinary citizens? Most of them live in multi-million dollar mansions that are not so easy on the ecology and that most of us can only dream about.

It’s like telling the rest of peons to eat more soy bean hot dogs to prevent animal cruelty, while they dine on caviar, lobster thermaddor and filet mignon. Remember the expression “Let them eat cake?”

Hypocrites.

Jan 24, 2009 at 9:04 am · @Reply ·

anyankafan

Man people need to step back a bit :P everyone seems so damn cranky on here.
There’s two sides to this:
1. They are very annoying, adna bit self-absorbed proclaiming their ‘pledges’ and it comes off as a massive cheese-fest

2. Like someone said, theyre doing something. even if it was fifteen minutes to film it, it was fifteen minutes they could have spent pretending to run from the paparazzi. And there are a lot of shallow people in the world whose worlds are influenced by celebrities. And they will be affected by this. Cos u know, they dont think for themselves :P so that’s a good!

And RE the editor :P i luv the articles bashing people. THey never seem particularly cold-hearted or vicious. I dont konw Japhy’s actual feelings on any of these matters which so often seem to divide readers, but when reading htem i always get a laugh. even if i dont agree with whats being said :P

so everyone calm down ;) k?

Jan 24, 2009 at 12:02 pm · @Reply ·

Alco

I think people should get off of their high horses.

A lot of people out there look up to celebrities, like it or not. I’d rather see them be inspired by them and do good thing for the US and Earth, than not do anything at all.
They could have just as easily done a video with random people but i would not have the same effect. When will people realize that they have to do things for their country and not just for them.
Don’t ask what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country has never been as appropriate as it is now.

Jan 24, 2009 at 2:32 pm · @Reply ·

michael

Its such an excellent representation of our culture. People who spend 99.9% of their time working on looking fabulous, screaming at their publicist to get them more exposure in Vanity Fair and party life away. Vapid, shallow and self centered. Its the Oprah culture. A culture of life is not worthwhile unless you achieve all your egotistical dreams and doing good amounts to no more than sending a check to some charity to help you justify the fact you spend $9000 on Prada shoes the past year.

The deepest joy and fulfillment in life comes from having something to love. Something real. So if you want to take a real pledge then pledge to put yourself in places and situations that are hard and difficult. Go out in the streets and start becoming involved with our youth, especially our gay youth who have no home because they have been kicked out for being gay. Volunteer at a Hospice where people are facing the hardest thing most any of us will ever face and just be their with them. Get involved with the things that seem the most thankless and the most impossible. I guarantee you that it will be painful, frustrating and you will never feel more powerless in your life. But your heart will soar, you will experience something that no amount of celebrity, no amount of working out, wearing fabulous clothes, no amount of star fucking will ever give you, you will find what Leonard Cohen once described love as “A broken Hallelujah”.

Let me sign off by saying there is nothing wrong with wearing nice clothes, taking care of yourself and partaking in festivities. I myself have a few pair of Prada shoes in my closet. But these things will never take you to that place within that we all long to touch, the place where we all realize who we really are.

Jan 24, 2009 at 3:06 pm · @Reply ·

WTF?

“A lot of people out there look up to celebrities, like it or not.” High horse or no, I find that statement simply sad. Americans are becoming increasingly obsessed with “Pop Culture”. It has even creeped into legitimate news sources in recent years. So, we now have once-respected anchors blathering like giddly school children about what Britney Spears was wearing when she farted outside Taco Bell. So, if anyone is looking toward these people as the mark to which they should aspire, I’d seriously sit down and reconsider my life if I were you.

And how much “good” are they doing? Paying lip-service to the “green” movement? Tearing down a house on national TV to replace it with a brand new “green” one. Was blowing up the home in a dramatic fashion, dumping the debris in a landfill, and purchasing all newly-manufactured products in anyway more environmentally friendly? Buying t-shirts made from bamboo fiber because it’s renewable? Like cotton wasn’t? Bamboo just has this exotic, eastern cache that reads “green”. These are among the stupid things to which we should aspire?

The reason some of us are on “high horses” is because we take this seriously. It’s not something that’s en vogue one day, and out the next – like celebrities. It’s something that many of us have been supporting for years. And we know damn well that when the celebs have moved on to the next big thing (and they always do), then so will their sycophantic little lemmings and all the political shifts, green movements, and humanitarianism will be as passe as stonewashed denim.

@gkruz: Oh my, I’m so sorry to have impugned your music taste. I’m sure the REAL artists who made all the REAL music you listened to in the 80s never shilled for anything.

Thanks for getting lost in the analogy and missing my point entirely. Next time, think before typing.

Jan 26, 2009 at 1:17 pm · @Reply ·

MARCI

I don’t have any favorite celebrity, I am not really into knowing who are they sleeping with or how much there mansion costs, but they are in the media, and they think their political views are correct, they say America is evil while they keep profiting, when I hear Sean Penn,Susan Sarandon, George Clooney, I wonder why are these people still here? I left my native country because my father suffered political persecution, I always admired the freedoms of this country so I moved, Why can’t they do the same ? It’s alright to have your views because that’s why is call Freedom but is dishonest to bash your own country in order to be popular.