Where my Old writing lives!

This is how much I know about Canada. It’s cold. And they have universal healthcare. The end. See you next week.

Oh come on. Can’t give up this easily. Sweet mother would disown me. I could list some funny statements about Canada. Everybody loves those. Little factoids to make people nod. Such as: Canada adopted its flag almost 100 years after its independence, which is fair because it would take me even longer to draw a maple leaf with bilateral symmetry.

Nah. It’s been done. Okay, how about something on how white Canada is, you know, the demographics. Well, Sweet Mother beat me to that one. And while I live in America, I’m not really American, so I can’t wax lyrical on the little differences between the maple leaf and the stars and stripes. Not in a funny, self-deprecating way. From me, it would just appear deprecating. I have never…

I grew up making regular trips to Canada for vacations. The food was weird. We would go to a Pizza Hut. You would think the same type of pizza would be the same in both countries. Nope. On the other hand, it was not unusual for a waitress to pull up a chair and sit down at the table with you for 5 minutes to chat. The Rockies were also a lot pointier. I remember a couple at the hotel where the husband would only speak English and the wife would only speak French. It made me think of the kids poem, Jack Spratt the entire time. When I was old enough to go to clubs and bars, on the U.S. side (Canadian border was 2 hours away) they would be half full of Canadians coming down to party on the weekends. Many, Canadians really liked to party. When I was out of school and driving on my own vacations, I went to Canada a few times. No one there drove the speed limit. Everyone passed me really fast, often illegal passing as well. It was a scary place to drive.