Falling Into a New Passion

By Aaron Lebold

08/29/2017

As far back as I can remember, I have always enjoyed writing. I used to look forward to assignments in school that involved creative stories. There was one assignment I recall that tasked us to write a story from the viewpoint of an inanimate object, this was perfect for me. I had a strange way of viewing material items, almost as if they had feelings, and I struggled to part with things.

The object I chose was a Kleenex, I remember going into detail about how it was afraid of being picked out of the box, and how it had witnessed its predecessor being used to stop a bleeding nose. I got a pretty good mark on the assignment, which was rewarding as I typically did poorly at school. There were a few other stories I came up with, I found one amongst my old school work titled, “The time I beat up 300 guys at once,” which I wrote in Junior High.

I did have a very poor attention span and was diagnosed with Petit Mal Epilepsy at a young age. I struggled a lot with reading, I would try to get into a book and something would provoke my imagination, I would continue reading but not absorb anything. Often times I would have to go back a long ways in the book and re-read it because I had gotten completely lost.

In my teenage years, music inspired me to want to help people. I became fixated on the idea of being a musician, but I really didn’t know anything about it, and also found I was too introverted to be able to project my voice much past a whisper. Where I did feel confident was in the song lyrics I was constantly writing.

Nearly every day I would write the lyrics to a new song, and began feeling that the value of my insight would outweigh the fact that I had no musical talent. I pressed on, feeling like it would work itself out. In my twenties, I would find myself recording a CD in a studio near my apartment. Again, I am still happy with the lyrics but the rest of it is pretty embarrassing.

After sending my CD to as many record labels as I could with no result, I pressed on and made a second CD with fewer songs, and home-made sleeve art. Again I sent it to all the record companies I could find with no result. I was sure it was my purpose to send a message of hope, but I began to second-guess everything after the realization struck that I was not a good musician.

After a few years, I decided to make some changes in my life and went back to school to be an addictions counselor. In this, I found a new way to spread a message of hope, and in the process, I learned a great deal about myself. After doing this job for over seven years I began feeling like I needed something different and was feeling a great deal of stress at work.

I took a leave of absence from work to deal with the way I was feeling. Over those five months, I engaged in regular counseling appointments and even saw a Psychiatrist. In one of my counseling sessions, it was discussed that I should be tracking my feelings, or keeping a journal. I had been working with my friend Brad to help him as best as I could. Brad worked with me at the treatment center and made the decision to try to help people online. He created Brad Mcleod Recovery, and I wanted to help him gain some traction on Social Media.

I had never done any kind of treatment program myself, despite being an active drug addict for over ten years. I always felt I missed out on something and may have still been missing some pieces in my own life. At the treatment center, we always encouraged our clients to share their life story with each other. A few times I was asked to share mine, but I found the idea overwhelming as I had never really shared it before in its entirety.

When my counselor suggested journaling, I decided that instead of tracking my thoughts on paper, I would begin an online account and share my life story a little bit each day. I figured that if I were to get my story out there it may also help contribute to the work Brad was doing if I attached the name of his business to it in some way.

I created a profile on a site that Brad had suggested called Medium. My username became Aaron Lebold BMR (BMR is an acronym for Brad Mcleod Recovery) and began to write my story each day and share them in a few recovery groups. It didn’t take long before I developed a great passion for this, I would look forward to writing each day, and it motivated me to get out of bed and be productive.

The more I wrote my story, the more interested I became in writing about the different elements of recovery. Brad encouraged me to reach out and look into doing some guest blogs for established recovery writers. I had seen work from a site called fromaddict2advocate that I really enjoyed and reached out to its creator, Marilyn Davis.

Marilyn gave me all the information I needed to submit an article, and I put one together on challenging your thoughts and submitted it. Marilyn made a few edits, which helped me see areas I could improve on as a new writer, and once I agreed to the small changes, my article was published. I felt a sense of accomplishment and began to put a bit more focus on writing.

Still working on my life story, I found myself starting to develop a bit of my own style, and I had received some positive feedback. I also found support from an old friend named Mike. We had been close when I was younger, and through Facebook, I noticed he was doing regular blogs about his experience working at a CD store for many years. He called it “Record store Tales” and posted it on WordPress.

The more I wrote, the more I began to feel a new sense of purpose, and with continued encouragement, I created my own WordPress site and Facebook page. I began writing recovery blogs, blogs about people who have inspired me, and blogs about my personal opinions on current events. I also have continued working on my life story, and have completed over 50 contributions on Medium.

I have since returned to my job, but remain committed to trying to spread a message of hope through my writing. In my time off, I stumbled upon what I believe is the next chapter of my life. The feeling I have discovered through writing has helped me hit the reset button on my life and has presented liberation and optimism I haven’t felt for a long time.

Author’s Bio:

Aaron Lebold

I have been in the recovery field for over seven years, I find a great deal of purpose by helping others, and I have a great passion for recovery. I currently work as a Recovery Coach with Brad Mcleod Recovery and do my best to support people struggling with addiction over the internet.

If you would like to learn more about me, I have been writing out my life story on Medium (https://medium.com/@aaronleboldbmr) I am really enjoying the experience, and reflecting on my past has been very beneficial for me, even after nearly nine years of recovery.

I want to personally thank all the people who have been following my work, and all the people who have encouraged me to keep pushing forward. I plan to keep going, even though I am not sure yet where it will take me.

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Published by S.W. Biddulph

Scott Biddulph is a published writer, author, and poet from North Georgia. He began writing as a youngster and followed his lifelong dream of reaching people through the written word when he returned to The University of North Georgia in 2013 to finish earning his BA/English with a concentration on publication and creative writing. His publications include the following: an eBook, Apples of Gold: A collection of inspirational short stories and poems (Smashwords, 2010) and a paperback, Voices from the Heart, (Createspace, 2012). His poetry is published in Papers and Publications Undergraduate Research Journal. Vol 3 (2014) and the award-winning Chestatee Review (Spring, 2015), among other places (Check his LinkedIn profile for a full list of his publications). He is currently working on publishing poetry, creative non-fiction, academic essays, and his memoir.
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Scott has also worked as an intern editor for the University of North Georgia Press. As a freelance editor, he has done the layout and design of several books and magazines. He is currently working with several authors on various publication projects in which he is either ghostwriting, editing manuscripts, or doing the layout and design of their books.
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Finally, and most importantly, he is a father, grandfather, husband, and dedicated Harley Davidson rider. He and his family enjoy the beauty of the North Georgia Mountains where they live—especially their screened in back porch where they love to bird watch.
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~ "I love realism. I love writing about the raw, down-to-Earth, heartfelt realities of life. I love to write in a way that reaches into the human soul—to take the greatest pains and struggles in life, and make them a blessing to others. Fantasy is a wonderful, interesting thing—but real-life situations, feelings, fears, and dreams are an unexplored ocean of stories that need to be told." ~
~Scott Biddulph~
View all posts by S.W. Biddulph

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6 comments

Aaron,
I think those music lyrics were probably a form of journaling. Pouring out words from the heart can be done in so many ways! Keep writing. It is processing…on a page. As a writer you find that many people can relate to your story, and in some way that validates the painful process of having a story in the first place. Thanks for sharing yours!

Aaron, Welcome to Two Drops! I enjoyed reading your piece and following your writing experiences. I found it intriguing both that you would write about a Kleenex 🙂 and your
method of getting your life story down. I may have to give your method a try – it seems a bit manageable that way!
Looking forward to reading more of your posts.

You remind me of a school writing assignment of being the fly on the wall of the local cafe. I flunked miserably, but what did a 13 year old know about the feelings a fly experienced. All I did was report what people talked about. If I had that assignment to do over again…

Aaron, thanks for posting.
We have some common ground. I loved writing in school when I was young, then started playing music and thought I was going to be a musician. I even went to college for music. But…

I was afraid of failing and being broke all my life, so I gave up on my dream to be a musician and went out into the real world to get a job. Guess what? I failed there and was broke more often than not. Irony?

In the last year or so I’ve reconnected with writing and I’m glad I did. Stay with it…I’m sure you’ll do well. I’ve posted on Medium as well – I’ll connect with you there also.

Hi, Aaron. I’m glad you let us know more about your first attempts at writing. Too often, we see the adult writing and assume – falsely for the most part – that writers come fully hatched. I’m also glad that you accepted the invitation to write here at Two Drops of Ink.

Many of us in recovery know the benefits of journaling, however, it is just as effective for keeping our thoughts, character development for our novels, and writer observations, as it is for isolating our feelings and struggles. You asked me once about the writer’s notebook – it’s just my public journal, the other, well that stays at home.

Writing your life story has been interesting to follow, and your voice continues to mature. I hope you write for us again, here at Two Drops.

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