Sunday, September 30, 2012

This is a response Ken gave to a young man that was questioning my desire for a small government when I am against abortion and gay marriage ~

You have many interesting points which I cannot address all at this time. It
seems that your major issue relates to gay marriage, which has nothing to do
with Lori's post... but somehow you infer it because of your premise that government
is intruding on privacy if it does not allow it.

No... I would argue
that assigning a privileged status to heterosexual couples with marriage is a
time honored societal norm and requirement for a healthy society. Your link
showing 11 countries that now allow gay marriage proves Lori's point that until
11 years ago, no previous society ever sanctioned gay marriage. The concept of
gay marriage is relatively non-existent and to support your position with something
that changed 11 years ago as compared to 4000+ years of civilized society proves
Lori's point.

You write, " I fail to see how something like gay marriage
harms you, and by your own definition, we need to protect the rights to freedom
as long as those freedoms do not infringe upon the rights of others."
Nature dictates that marriage should be between a man and a woman, not
two of the same sex. Companionship, loving a best friend, love for others can
still take place without calling it "marriage." Any cursory study of the word
marriage will lead you regularly back to one theme, and that is the procreation
of children and the making of a family. Two of the same sex are not able to make
children, hence, should what they do together be called a marriage?

As
you know, we would oppose gay sex on many grounds, moral and natural, but
putting that aside, the concept of marriage is, and has been from the beginning
of time, a societal recognition of a heterosexual couple who desires to both
live together and procreate together. It created a structure for society around
which the family was central, primarily because of the need to continue the
repopulation of the society.

Now you, and others like you want to
rewrite the definition of marriage, and you vehemently protest, unreasonably,
that somehow a gay couple is harmed because they are not given marriage status.
The reality is that such harm is minimal at best, as civil unions in most states
provide almost all the same rights for gay couples as does marriage.

So
what are you really fighting for? Recognition that somehow same sex couples
deserve the same recognition as married couples, even though such couples cannot
procreate? Yes, they can adopt, and I believe that such adoptions are unfair to
the child who will not experience the normalcy of a mom and dad in his/her
upbringing. Regardless, I still would not oppose same sex couples adopting, BUT
they cannot contribute to society what most heterosexual couples can
contribute... offspring.

There are few societies until China that did
not only desire children and large families but encouraged it as it meant the
survival of the society. France is on track to lose most of its cultural
survival because the French will not produce a 2 for 2 minimum required to
sustain the society, and instead the immigrants are taking over. If you are a
"one world" advocate this may not alarm you, but for those of us who love and
appreciate cultures passing down from one generation to another, we find that
modern society may be doomed, and gay marriage will hasten our demise.

I would challenge you to tell me what rights are taken away from
a civil union couple as compared to a married couple, and then hopefully admit,
this whole gay marriage issue is nothing much more than the gays wanting to have
equal status with heterosexual couples, even when they have three strikes
against them; they cannot create offspring together, they cannot give the
normalcy of a mom and dad to their child, and the parts do not fit. Yet, you and
others somehow feel that gay unions deserve the status as marriage when it falls
short in at least three vital areas.

No, it is really about trying to
say that homosexuality is OK, when it is not. No legal status of marriage given
by the government will ultimately make the parts fit, nor allow the two to procreate
with each other, nor make them a normal family. You want a dangerous experiment
and then to wait and see where our society and world is in 50-100 years. And
besides, giving a privileged status to those who can procreate is not
unreasonable and a standard throughout history until very recently, so you
cannot blame some of us for believing gay marriage to be a huge mistake.

We do not dislike gays, and some of my friends are gay. Some of my
friends drink too much, others watch porn, the list goes on. We love them all,
but we do not, and cannot condone the destruction that they do to themselves, so
we make an attempt to speak the truth and common sense and decency in love.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

She was talking about the olden days when a gentleman would open a car door for a lady or walk on the outside of the sidewalk when escorting her...But nowadays women aren't considered the weaker or gentler sex {thank goodness for that}, and these acts are viewed differently. They can seem old-fashioned or even offensive.

Our society has gotten so far removed from biblical principles, it continues to amaze me. The Bible definitely states that women are the weaker sex ~

Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

I Peter 3:7

This is why Dennis Prager believes universities are destroying our society. People know there is a difference between men and women before entering the universities, but come out believing they are the same.

Where has common sense gone? Look at the bodies of men and women. They are very different. Testosterone levels are very different. A man's levels vary between 250 to 850, whereas a woman's level are between 25 to 85. Women can bear children and nurse them. Men can play football....MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT!!!

I hate to be the one to tell you this, women, but we are the weaker sex. God said it and science proves it. I could care less what the university tells you, they are wrong. Until women start acting like women, men won't act like men.

So enjoy the differences between the sexes. They are awesome! I don't want to be like a man. I like to be treated like a lady. I want to be protected. I don't like what feminism has done to our country. To me it is very sad. Be thankful the next time a man opens a door for you.

Monday, September 24, 2012

This is the what I believed through most years of my marriage. "If he loved me like he is commanded by God to love me, like Christ loved the church, then I would submit and obey him." I often hear women tell me that their husbands are not worthy of respect. These thoughts are what trips women up and causes much harm in marriage.

The following is from Elizabeth Elliot in her book Discipline ~ The Glad Surrender

The submissiveness of a wife to her husband is the appropriate form of honor that she pays him. She offers it just as she would offer it to Christ. In respecting her husband, she respects Christ - that is, she respects who he is in Christ.

It is frequently argued that she owes him nothing if he is not fulfilling the special command issued to husbands: love your wives. This attitude produces a permanent stand-off. As long as she refuses to submit on the ground that he does not earn her respect, the husband, by the same logic, may refuse her his love, since she does not submit and therefore does not deserve it.

Each has been given a particular command and a particular strength with which to meet the other more than halfway. In the case of the wife, her strength is what Peter calls an "...imperishable ornament, a gentle, quite spirit..." There is no calculating the power of such submission.

It is even possible that an unbelieving husband will be won over without a word said when he sees the "chaste and reverent behavior" of his wife.

Is it possible to pay honor, like toll or taxes, to a cruel, abusive, unbelieving man? {I would never recommend a woman staying with a physically abusive husband.} If everything in her recoils from her husband's injustice or hatred? If she fears suffering or other frightening consequences?

The grace of God has proved through the centuries to be sufficient for countless 'impossible' human circumstances. She may, through that grace, pay honor and respect to him as to the Lord, certain as although it is unmerited by and apparently lost on her husband, it is not lost on Christ.

And Christ may draw the husband to faith because of her reverent behavior. Faith, not fear, should govern her. Try God! I would say.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

If she is married to a poor preacher living in tremendous poverty with 14 children and pregnant with her 15th?

If her husband is sick with a very bad cold. She has tuberculosis. They have four children. The first one is blind. The second one is dead. The third one is deaf. The fourth one has tuberculosis. She is pregnant with her fifth?

A white man raped a 13 year old black girl and she is pregnant?

A teenager who is not married is pregnant?

The first mother posed produced John Wesley. The second one Ludwig van Beethoven. The third one Ethel Waters, the great gospel singer who sang at Billy Graham Crusades. The last one was our Saviour.

NO child is unworthy of living. Let me repeat this....NO Child is unworthy of living. Every human being was known by God before they were created...before time began. We were knit together in our mother's womb.

When a woman is pregnant she is carrying a baby, a human being, not a fetus, tissue, or some other name that takes away the true identity of the baby.

Human life is so very precious. I wept when Dr. David Jeremiah posed these questions to us thinking about all the amazing human beings that have been destroyed for convenience sake who could have impacted our world in a positive way.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

One young woman with several children was discontent. She lived in an apartment but wanted to live on a homestead with her own home and garden. She started reading an older woman's writings about motherhood, being a wife, and simple living. This is what she later wrote that older woman ~

I have become totally unmaterialistic, devoted to simple living, incredibly absorbed in mothering and being a wife and more in love with my Lord in the last year.

Psalm 37 is a good Psalm to read and meditate upon.

Trust in the Lord and do good.

Delight yourself also in the Lord; and He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your ways unto the Lord.

Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him.

Fret not yourself.

Cease from anger and forsake wrath.

A little that a righteous man has is better than the riches of many wicked.

So many wonderful things to ponder in this Psalm.

Living a simple lifestyle pleasing to the Lord brings great joy. God tells us that godliness with contentment is great gain. These things are not easy in this day of the greatest material wealth this world has ever seen. Never being satisfied and always wanting more is not what the Lord asks of us. If we are married with children, He asks us to be content with this and the wages your husband earns. If you are single without a husband or children, He asks you to be content and wait patiently on Him. Trust Him. Remember, it isn't having a ton of money or a big mansion that is beautiful, but clean, uncluttered and tidy!

Whatever your lot in life, learn to be content. Paul said he had to learn to be content. It doesn't come naturally. Be renewed by the transforming of your mind. Decide to be content and you will learn to be content. Sing praises to His name and be continually thankful for all that He has done.picture source

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

A new commandment I give unto you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another.

John 13:34,35

Jesus said we are known to the world as His disciples as the world sees us loving others, yet the state of Christian marriages is terrible. Our divorce rate is not much better than those outside of the church. Think what power to change society we would have if we obeyed God and loved our husbands.

As I mentor women, they finally see so clearly the lack of love so many of their married friends have for their husbands. Their friends roll their eyes when their husbands speak, interrupt and correct them, and show disrespect towards them. One young woman wanted me to mentor her because all of her Christian married friends were either very unhappily married or getting divorced. This should not be.

We should be known for our love. LOVING our husbands!!!

Ken and I walk around our neighborhood. We try holding hands most of the time. People have commented to us when they first meet us, "Oh, you are that couple that is always holding hands." We realize how much people notice such a simple act, so we continue to hold hands.

When we are at a restaurant and I see a couple laughing and enjoying themselves, more times than not neither of them have wedding rings on. Let's be those couples at restaurants that hold hands and laugh with each other that have wedding rings on.

We need to be an example to society how wonderful marriage is and that it is a very good thing. Start obeying God and LOVE your husband. That command written above is for you to really love your husband. It isn't a feeling. It is a choice, a decision. As you start acting like you love your husband, even if and when he is unlovable, your actions will follow and you will be pleasing the Lord.

Monday, September 17, 2012

According to this article, the findings suggest that eliminating all physical punishment of children would reduce the prevalence of mental disorders, the researchers said.

It is interesting to note that those opposed to spanking usually change the word to hitting. Hitting is a means to harm a child, whereas spanking is used to train and discipline a child. They have changed the word to make spanking seem like something evil.

How they come to the conclusions in this article are beyond me. I guess you can find statistics to support anything you believe and just because you read something doesn't mean it is true. Almost all of my generation was spanked and there were very few discipline problems. Even the principal in my elementary school spanked children who were naughty. I can hardly remember any badly behaved children when I was young.

Today most children aren't spanked and they are out of control. Yes, I know many children who have not been spanked grow up to be good, self-controlled adults. However, if you ask teachers today, children are out of control. I know. I taught for four years and it wasn't easy. The lack of discipline is evident.

Participants were asked, "As a child how often were you ever pushed, grabbed, shoved, slapped or hit by your parents or any adult living in your house?"

Pushing, grabbing, shoving, and slapping are not considered spanking. Spanking should be used only as a tool to train a child who is in open disobedience. We didn't push, grab, shove, or slap our children. We used a small strap on their bottom or top of their leg in an intentional and controlled manner.

To say that there is so much mental disorders today because of spankings is a stretch. There seems to be more mental illnesses today in an age where spanking is frowned upon than ever before.

Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him. Proverbs 13:24

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Recently I wrote about Julia Child and her incredible marriage. The other day I watched a reality show about a newly married young couple. Oh, how I wish I could give her some helpful advice.

While in the kitchen fixing dinner, the husband said something his young wife didn't appreciate at all. {It was really a very harmless statement.} Her mother and sister were there and she became very upset with him. She pouted and stewed and the husband was baffled. She wouldn't tell him, her mother, or sister what was wrong with her.

After the mother and sister left, she explained to him what he had said that offended her. She was offended easily. I Corinthians 13 states that love does not take into account a wrong suffered...in other words, it is not easily offended.

When I was young, I was offended easily. When you are offended you become upset and angry and often use it as a way to manipulate others. As I have grown older, I have learned to allow people to say and do what they want and not become upset. Ken will occasionally still make comments that could offend me easily if I let it but I have decided I wasn't going to let it bother me. He doesn't have to say and act exactly the way I want him to act anymore.

Life is much more enjoyable if you don't go around with a chip on your shoulder becoming easily offended by others especially your husband. Your marriage will benefit greatly if you learn this important lesson.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking,it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs.I Corinthians 13:4,5Alphabe-Thursday

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

The dictionary defines cynical as bitterly or sneeringly distrustful, contemptuous or pessimistic.

Several years ago, I felt like this nation was ready to fall off a cliff. I was scared. I no longer thought voting would help. I just knew we were going into a major depression. There was no hope for our nation. Evil and oppression was taking over.

I have changed my mind. What use is it to be discouraged and pessimistic? I have decided to smile at the future as the Proverbs 31 woman does, vote, and pray. I will work hard and be joyful always. I will think the best of others and hope for the best.

We always have hope. God is still sovereign and on His throne. He is still in complete control. I no longer worry about the future or the price of gas. I may not be here tomorrow so why not enjoy today for This is the day that the Lord hath made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it. {Psalm 118:24} Life is too short to spend time worrying about what might happen tomorrow.

The just shall live by faith. {Galatians 3:11}

Faith that God is in control

Faith that He is our Protector and Provider.

Faith that He hasplans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. {Jeremiah 29:11}

Therefore, we have nothing to fear or be cynical about! The story has been written. We know how it ends and it ends so good ~

Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and He will dwell with them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.Revelation 21:3,4

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Whoever loves instruction and correction loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is like a brute beast, stupid and undiscriminating.

Proverbs 12:1

Whoa! We are commanded to LOVE instruction and correction. Can you please raise your hand if you LOVE to be corrected and instructed, especially by your husband or your boss?

I try to read a Proverb a day. It is amazing how many times it teaches this concept. {Poverty and shame come to him who refuses instruction and correction, but he who heeds reproof is honored. Proverbs 13:18}

We will never be perfect until we die and go to be with Jesus. Until then, we must be open to learning and acting upon correction and rebuke. It is for our good.

We have mentored a couple who decided they didn't want to meet with us after the first time. I have met with women who have decided the same thing. They don't like being corrected or told they are doing anything wrong. I seriously doubt they will ever have a great marriage.

Those who have listened and acted upon our instruction have all improved their marriage. Many of them have great marriages. God's ways work.

I can always learn how to be a better wife. Every year, I want to be a better wife than the last year. This takes listening to others, admitting when I am wrong, and deciding to do the right thing with the Spirit working powerfully inside of me.

It means continually renewing my mind with God's Truth and applying it to my life. We should all be always learning so we can become more and more like Jesus and impact the world around us. We should not compromise with the world and be content being lukewarm Christians.

We need to hate that which is evil and cling to that which is good. We need to walk the talk and really love those that God puts into our path.

So next time someone gives you instruction or correction, thank them for it and try changing so you can better more like Jesus instead of acting like a brute beast. In the process, you will be much happier. After all, love is not easily offended.P.S. This is a picture of my cat...the best cat we have ever had but I couldn't think of a better picture to describe brutish!

Monday, September 10, 2012

Whenever I write on this topic, I get a lot of comments disagreeing with me. I am told in God's Word to teach the young women with children to be keepers at home and that is what I am attempting to do.

My definition of keeper at home is a mother who is mostly at home taking good care of her husband, children, and home. I had a mother that was home full-time growing up and I loved it. My dad refused to let my mom work outside of the home.

Every day I would come home from school and yell "Hi Mom!" and tell her all about my day. Lots of my friends loved coming to my home because it was warm and homey. When I went to my friend's homes where their moms worked, it felt cold and uniniviting. I could sense a huge difference between the two.

I was home full-time for my children and I loved it. They loved it. They loved being taken care of and trained by me. They knew I was always there to help them whenever they needed me for anything. It gave them a sense of security in this very insecure world.

So this is my view on this topic from my childhood years and the years of my children's growing up years. You can argue the definition of being a keeper at home however you want but I, as an older women, am teaching you what I think it means.

If you don't agree with me, that is your right. You will stand before God with the way you lived your life, not me. I don't pretend to know everything. I just study and observe a lot and love to share my views as what I see works best.

I don't believe in quality time verses quantity time. Children need both. Children need their mothers. They need them to feed them healthy, discipline them, and protect them. This is what I think is meant when the Bible says that mothers need to be keepers at home or they blaspheme the Word of God.

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children. To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

My son, Ryan, just went out with a new friend recently. His friend is new to the area. He has a great job. He married his high school sweetheart. They moved out here and he bought a new home for them. She feels like she missed out on life so she left him to go live with her friends in another state. This young man told Ryan the same thing has happened to several of his friends.

I know of two men who experienced the same thing. They both come from great families. They love God, work hard and are men of integrity. They married "Christian" women who they intended to grow old with. Their wives got bored and left them.

This breaks my heart. These women have been lied to. They think they will find happiness somewhere out there, outside of God's will for their lives.God's will for them is to stay with their husbands and make them happy. You will never find long-lasting happiness outside of God's will. It is fleeting and unfulfilling.

I pray for these young men to find wives that will love them just the way that they are now. Wives that will learn what pleases them and serve them. Wives that respect, submit to and obey them. Wives that will allow their husbands to be the leader of the home. I pray these young men will be blessed with children. They want a family.

I wish I could talk to these young women. It is happening more and more even in Christian homes. Most of them wouldn't want to listen to what I have to say. They would say I am being too hard on them. I would just speak the words that God speaks to them. It would change them if they would listen.

Choose wisely, young men. Find a woman who enjoys the skills that go along with homemaking and child raising. Have them read this blog and ask them if they agree with it. Discuss everything even the tough subjects like submission. Ask them what they think their role as wife should be. Tell them you will do everything in your power to love them as Christ loves the Church. Ask God to lead you to your wife and make it clear to you.Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.Proverbs 31:28-30

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Where does your beauty and worth come from? Society? Your friends? Your boyfriend or husband? The way you dress? The clothes you wear? The shape of your figure? Flawless skin? Beautiful teeth?

As I grow older and get more wrinkles, thankfully, my beauty and worth don't come from any of those things. My beauty and worth come from Jesus. You see, I know who I am in Christ. I am a new creature because of Him. I am His child. I am worthy because He tells me I am worthy. In fact, I am the righteousness of God! Wow! Those are things to be celebrated.

Since I have found my worth in Christ, I can smile at the future.

I can rejoice, for this is the day that the Lord has made!

I can truly love and accept my husband just the way that he is because my worth doesn't come from him.

I can love and enjoy my children.

I can be generous and give because God is my provider and He will never run out.

I can wash the dishes and toilets cheerfully, doing my work heartily as to the Lord.

I don't have to worry about gas prices going higher because God will take care of all of my needs.

I can claim all of God's promises for myself because He tells me to and He is a promise keeper.

So stop trying to get your beauty and worth from how good you look or from how much you own or how athletic or talented you might be or even another human being. All of those things fade away with age or disappoint. Only God can fill that God-shaped vacuum so start filling it with Him!

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God has before ordained that we should walk in them.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Ryan O'Neill had an affair while he was with Farrah Fawcett. He was asked why he had an affair if he loved her so much. He said that Farrah was always mad at him and he found someone that wasn't mad at him. Very sad...both the affair and that she was always mad at him.

So many wives are mad at their husbands. I was mad at Ken for 23 years. My mom was usually mad at my dad. We just had dinner with a couple and she said for most of their 30 years of marriage, she was mad at her husband.

God doesn't want us to live lives mad at our husbands. I sure wouldn't want some one mad at me all the time. The commandments He gives to wives concerning their husbands are as follows ~

Love your husband. {Ephesians 5:25}

Please your husband. {I Corinthians 7:34}

Reverence your husband. {Ephesians 5:33}

Serve your husband. {Galatians 5:13}

Submit to your husband. {Ephesians 5:22}

Obey your husband. {Titus 2:5}

I don't see being mad, having disdain for, or trying to change him in those commands. Those commands aren't given with a stipulation that he be a good husband. Love him if he is a nice guy. Reverence him if he is worthy of being reverenced.

No, there are no stipulations except one...because God commands you to do these things. He is a good God and His ways are always good. Trust Him. Forgive your husband and be mad at him no longer. A woman who is mad at her husband cannot be joyful and God commands us to be joyful. Life is a lot better when you are rejoicing.

Monday, September 3, 2012

She is very upset that her husband likes looking at other women's boobs and butts. The majority of men enjoy looking at boobs and butts. No, they aren't suppose to lust. Teach your young sons to bounce their eyes and control what they look at but most husbands weren't taught that.

Boobs and butts are everywhere today. Women love showing them off because they like the attention they get from men. We are called to a higher standard. We are called to be modest and protect our brothers in Christ.

However, I told her she needs to focus on her own sins and forget her husband's sins. Let the Lord deal with them. He has to stand before God and give an account of his life. We aren't accountable for our husband's sins.

Many of you will say that the wife needs to confront her husband in his sin. In my experience, I haven't seen this to be a problem. Wives love confronting their husbands in their sins, over and over again. Yes, confront him once but then let the Lord work on him.

If he wants you to hold him accountable, hold him accountable but you must not let it bother you. Let it go and enjoy life. He isn't perfect. He never will be and neither will you. Would you like him always confronting you about your sins? Overeating? Gossiping? Being unsubmissive and arguing?

We all have sins that we struggle with. Instead of nagging him about it, pray for him. Pray for him often. Our husbands need our prayers. This is the best gift you can give him. They are in a battle just as we are. Satan would love to destroy our husbands and our marriages so pray.

Welcome! I have been married for 35 years. I have four grown children who walk in Truth and five precious grandchildren. All of my children are happily married to godly spouses. I love teaching women to be sober, to love their husbands and children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, and obedient to their husbands as the Bible instructs me to do.This is a personal teaching blog sharing what I have seen work from God's Word in my life and the lives of many others. "A wise man will hear, and will increase in learning..."{Proverbs 1:5}.