Breaking the Chain of Pain – The Fox in the Chicken House Part 2

In my earlier post The Fox in the Chicken House, I discussed the proposed administration of the president-elect. As we all know from the protests we hear about in the news and our Facebook feed, a lot of people are unhappy about the results of the 2016 Presidential election. So much so that when the VP-elect attended the Broadway show, Hamilton the other night, members of the audience booed him.

This booing is a continuation of the “chain of pain” as discussed in my earlier post. People are in pain, they are unhappy, they are afraid more than anything. So the way they are passing their pain on is to take to booing. While I thoroughly and heartily defend the booers for their right to boo under our First Amendment, I do not condone or approve of this behavior at all! This booing and other verbal uncivility acts are not helping or solving anything.

When did Americans lose their manners? Perhaps we lost them when we started eating in our cars while driving. In any case, what used to be a mannered people and now we have become a rude and verbally insensitive people. Just ask Frank Luntz the famous political focus group pollster. http://www.luntzglobal.com/.

Here’s a quote from an interview with him in 2014:

“It was what Luntz heard from the American people that scared him. They were contentious and argumentative. They didn’t listen to each other as they once had. They weren’t interested in hearing other points of view. They were divided one against the other, black vs. white, men vs. women, young vs. old, rich vs. poor. “They want to impose their opinions rather than express them,” is the way he describes what he saw. “And they’re picking up their leads from here in Washington.” Haven’t political disagreements always been contentious, I ask? “Not like this,” he says. “Not like this.”

As we can see from the documentation dating back to George W. Bush in 2005, we have become a rude, thoughtless and inconsiderate people. Politicians became rude with each other and now 11 years later the American people have become so rude it’s embarrassing. We should all be embarrassed by what took place at that theater the other night, even if we feel the same way.

Have you heard of the Oneness movement, or of the hundreds of thousands, if not millions of Americans who believe in love, who believe in our humanity and our planet and how by our true nature, we are all connected, how we are all one?

Do you know how we know that we are all one, all connected? Because when you take anything, no matter what it is, a piece of rock, fabric, human flesh, your car, dinner, whatever, and put it under the strongest microscope we have, you will see the same thing.

How can that be?

We see the same stuff no matter what because we are all made from the same stuff. And it is not what you think. It’s more space than solid, and everything is moving. When you look around you and see objects and people, realize that all that you see is truly an illusion. Everything is moving, yet things appear solid. It’s all an illusion, we are in fact, all connected, all energy, all co-creating the environment we inhabit.

What does this oneness have to do with booing?

Let me explain.

When we boo at others, because everything is one, we are truly and really, booing at ourselves.

Get it?

No matter what you do to another person you are doing the same thing to yourself. So we need to get past the booing; we need to understand how to process our emotions so that we can be loving with each other but still express ourselves in such a way that we feel seen and heard.

Let’s take the case of the audience members at the theater as a case study. What can you do if you are one of those audience members, to be respectful of the people you are unhappy with, yet feel as if your concerns get heard?

1) You can choose to feel the love in your hearts for your fellow man, for your connection to your shared humanity; you can opt to feel gratitude for the individual’s willingness to give up their personal life and serve our country. There are many other ways you can love the VP-elect.

2) You can communicate your concerns in polite and thoughtful ways to the people who may be able to address your concerns. These would be our legislators. The President and VP alone can not do much, without the support of Congress. So the more loving way to be seen and heard is to take your concerns to the people who can and should listen. Whether they are successful in controlling the direction our Country gets taken, only time will tell. You can also lovingly communicate your concerns directly to the VP-elect during business hours by calling his office and leaving your comment.

We are bound to have concerns in the days ahead. We are likely to have disagreements. It is probable we are going to resist things that people around us or in power want to do. Let us all work towards holding love in our hearts for our fellow humanity. We are all one. We are not separate in any real way beyond appearances.

That does not mean that we have to like what another is doing, nor “sit back and see what he’ll do” as some are suggesting. If you are unhappy or in pain, instead of lashing out and trying to hurt someone or make them unhappy, stop yourself and consider your options.

How might you convey your hurt or pain or worry? Who will hear you? How can you feel seen? Remembering that you are one with the person you are upset with, remembering that what you do to them you are ultimately doing to yourself, what do you choose? You don’t like what they have done, but they are not what they have done. They are the same as you but in a different expression. You don’t like what they are expressing; you can still love them. Get it?

I’m not suggesting you bury or ignore your feelings. What I am suggesting is you find a mechanism to be seen. I’m suggesting you follow your feelings, allow your feelings, acknowledge your feelings and in polite, respectful ways, express your feelings.

What I am doing is calling my legislators. I love the president-elect and the VP-elect with all my heart, for I know we are one. I can respect them as humans, and I can respect their right as humans to do what they do.

When I hear of them doing things that I disagree with, that are going to impact me, as a taxpayer or as an individual, or our country in a way that I do not agree with, then it is my civic duty to contact them along with my legislature and let them know my concerns. Not by booing at them or sending them nasty tweets. Respectfully and with love. Remember the old adage: You get more flies with honey than vinegar.

I called everyone the other day when I heard that the president-elect is not going to live in the White House.

This decision seems like a complete disruption of our government and how it works, but that’s all fine.

However, I believe every single penny that the budget is enhanced to cover this frivolous behavior needs to come out of his pocket directly. That includes the cost of the bulletproof glass for his apartment, the extra cost of the Secret Service to cover him every weekend to and from NYC, etc. Every single penny should get paid for by the president-elect. That’s how I feel, so I picked up the phone and called everyone and told them that. I feel seen. Depending on how things go from here, will depend on if I also feel heard. If I continue to hear talk about this, I will call again.

I have called about all the proposed appointments I am uncomfortable with. If you have concerns, I encourage you to exercise your civic duty and do the same. Don’t let up. But don’t let up on love either. We are one, let’s show the world we can handle this situation with love.