IMO, she be better off suing the person who advised her about stuff like this.

Now hey, how is that Red Room website/business doing? It’s not exactly setting the world on fire these days, now is it?

So will it be involved with the Ross Mirkarimi defamation lawsuit? I mean, the damages there could add up to millions, huh?

I’ll tell you, if somebody gave me $10,000 to invest in a website that furthered my own glory and then I didn’t make as much money as I thought I was going to, it sure would be nice to displace blame, huh?

All right, I’m off to apply to Stanford Law. I’ll crib from this, so I’m a lock to get accepted! (Or I’ll get a colledge degree before applying, either way.)

Uhhhh:

You know, IM, with all the energy you exert, you could apply yourself to taking and passing the California Bar Exam. I’m srsly, you could do it. And then you could make big bucks advocating. You know, the way Angela Alioto does it. Nobody thinks she’s the brightest candle on the menorah but she gets it done, consistently and thoroughly.

And she makes far, far, far more moolah than you can ever hope to realize from a defamation endeavor.

3. [Sanctimonious line reading but otherwise within the bounds of reality.]

4. I think I’m going to call bullshit on this one. That’s just your opinion, IM.

5. So you “contacted the police on her behalf” but without her permission? And in a maladroit fashion to boot, one might add. Like using your personal iPhone to do so, “anonymously.” You’re not that sharp, are you, IM?

6. [Sanctimonious line reading but otherwise within the bounds of reality.]

11. Is Ross Mirkarimi a “convicted batterer” like in real life? What does the word “batterer” mean? What does the word “batter” mean? Oh, what’s that, you didn’t actually have a chance to learn that in colledge because you thought a high school diploma would suffice when applying to Stanford Law? That might have worked for Daredevil Matt Murdock in the comix but I don’t think that kind of thing works IRL.

12. Um, I think Ross Mirkarimi is your Sheriff because your neighbors voted for him, like overwhelmingly, right? Didn’t you host a fundraiser for him?

13. Does Christina Olague really think “it’s OK to abuse your wife?” Any support at all for this, you know, outside of this particular vendetta? Wow.

Hey Ivory. You talk about law school so much, why not just sign up for the state bar exam and study for it? You could pass if you applied yourself.

Now, is Red Room a “demanding social media startup?” I don’t know, how old is it? Does it make money? I don’t know.

Ivory unwittingly became a key witness in this case.

Yep. Using a pay phone instead of an iPhone might have helped on this score. And “unwittingly? Apparently.

And then it’s blah blah blah about the case that just ended yesterday.

(If only Ivory Madison had a few contacts and interested investors in the worlds of media and SFGov…)

Oh, hey, remember that whole attorney-client privilege thing? And remember when somebody said that Ivory was telling people that she was a California attorney? Hey, was that under oath or something? Hey, was it true?

Awww, there’s no answer on that score.

Now, instead of all this, why not work on proving that Ross Mirkarimi is a insincere liar starting from yesterday morning? You know, from the exact same time he apologized for all the things you’re complaining about. That would sink Ross, right there. Off you go…

And why not take the bar exam? You could pass it if you applied yourself. And you passed the baby bar already, right?

Now if you want to say that now-famous nonlawyer Ivory Madison was trained as an attorney, well, that would be O.K., I s’pose, but you can’t allege, as some have, recently, that she’s a “trained attorney.”

No.

No, no, no, no, no.*

Cause, you see, that goes too far.

OTOH, you can say that certain people thought IM was an attorney, for good reason, actually, and acted accordingly.

You could say that.

Imagine you’re a high school football player who went to a Catholic church to confess to sexual contact with a 15-year-old only to find out that the priest you thought you were talking to was actually Ashton Kutcher punking you. Would your mouthpiece start saying how evidence of your privileged communication should be thrown out of court because Ashton is a “trained priest?”

I doubt it.

But there are other good arguments to make, right?

Having said that, there’s nothing out there to suggest that Ivory acted improperly in the case at hand.