Name Change

Hi All! I need some help. I’ve been the end of the internet and back and can’t seem to find an answer to my situation. And its really not that uncommon — so hopefully one of you has experienced this and can help me out.

So, I got married last month. After we got back from our honeymoon – I went to the social security office and changed my name to First Name Maiden Name New Last Name

Basically, I deleted my given middle name and replaced it with my maiden name.

No problems in the social security office. about 6 days later new card shows up with new correct name.

Today, I go to the bmv to get a new drivers license. They print it with First Name Middle Name New Last Name. I tell them no, I changed my middle name too. And they say there is nothing they can do with out court order? WTF? So, now my drivers license and social security card show two different names. Is this for serious? I jsut want that old generic Marie gone from my middle name. I have no idea wtf to do next. How do I convince the bmv to print me a new license with the name that is on my friggen soc card!!! Please, anything you know that can help!

Taking her maiden name as a middle name after marriage is one of the more popular name change choices of brides today. Many women are attached to their maiden names for various reasons: they built a career using it, they are the only child to carry on the family name or they can’t imagine “being anyone else”. Adding her maiden name as a middle name allows for a woman to “keep” her maiden name while taking her husband’s last name, but avoid the mouthful of a hyphenated name. News flash! More and more states are no longer recognizing a woman’s right to change her middle name based on marriage. What does this mean to newlyweds in the middle of name change? If you live in California, New Jersey, New York, New York City, Ohio (unless your Marriage Certificate shows your intended middle name), Pennsylvania or Washington you are unableto take your maiden name as your middle name as part of your married name change.

Be aware of your state’s policies regarding name change. If you file your government forms with a new middle name, but live in a state that disallows maiden to middle name change you will end up with mismatched identification documents. The reality of having a different name on your state driver’s license and your U.S. Passport can be unsettling. Travel will be tedious as you need to book any international flights in the name on your passport, but local flights should match your state driver’s license. There can also be issues if security is requiring two forms of ID (as yours won’t match). We highly recommend choosing one married name option and using it on ALL of your documents.

If a bride is dead set on changing her middle name, she will have to petition the U.S. court system via an attorney for a legal name change. This can be a very long and expensive process, but it might be the only way a couple can come to a married name they can agree upon. The moral of this blog posting is be sure to research your state’s name change policies before you begin your name change. If you’d like to speak with a married name change expert about your particular state and situation, call the gurus at MissNowMrs.com. They’ll provide you with the most up-to-date information on your state for free! They can also help you consider alternate name change options if you end up being in a non-middle name change state.

@sarg88: Do not give up just yet. I am not certain it is illegal. Does your marriage certificate have your intended name? I would try calling a different office. Some people are difficult.

Try to fix it ASAP or they may try to charge you full price for another licence. Hopefully, you get a more understanding person.

Btw, I know someone who came here (not Ohio) with maiden name as middle. Years later a man in gov office tried to tell her she could not use maiden name as middle. All her documents were already in first maiden last! I don’t know what his problem was, but it is not against fed. law.

@beemyname: yes. i pulled out both of my social security cards. the old one and the new one showing that both my middle and last name were changed. he didn’t care. told me to call the courts and good luck.

@beemyname: and @sarg88: I find this situation to be a bit upsetting, especially because I personally chose this type of name change (first, maiden, hislast) and have been a very strong proponent of it on WB. I am now hoping that I did not encourage anyone who resides in one of these states to change her name in this manner and who may, as a result, be dealing with this type of significant complication.

I don’t understand why a state would not allow this type of name change due to marriage when first, maiden, newlast has long been considered to be the formal, traditional manner in which women changed their names in the U.S., I am wondering when these states implemented these restrictions and why.

Also, I realize that the federal and state governments are separate entities, but I am wondering why the SSA offices in those particular states would not at least caution a woman who asks SSA to make such a name change that the state in which she resides will not recognize the name change without a court order.

@sarg88: I am so sorry that you are having to deal with all of this, and I hope that there will be a less complicated way for you to reconcile this situation with your disparate documents.

@Brielle: I agree. When it comes to a couple of these states. I have seen conflicting info. I am still not sure it is illegal in Ohio based on the info from the Ohio bar. I think some people are ill informed and others may try to impose their own preferences. I did not find a direct quotation of the Ohio law, so I don’t know what the conflict is about. Either way, SSA should properly inform people of the state law.

this is just so upsetting. I agree, the SSA should have at least warned me that on the state level there are quite a few more hoops to jump through. I’m going to make some phone calls tomorrow to see what needs to be done. But for now, I have a different name on my soc card and my drivers license. I have no idea what my name is now! haha

I’m back. Today I finally found some time to go down to my county’s court house (only open 9-4… so had to take some time off work)… Ended up paying $110.10 to change my name and then had to have it posted in a publication for $35. My court hearing is set for Nov 27th. And then my middle name will officially be my maiden name. What a pain in the ass. Fair warning to the ladies who live in Ohio. …. its kind of a pain in the ass to change your middle name.