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Saturday, June 04, 2011

Who Is In The Room?

Image via WikipediaIf in a city that is 60% nonwhite, when you enter a room and almost everyone is white, and you are nonwhite, of course you notice. But then the term nonwhite does not define me. I am not non anything. The very term nonwhite is Eurocentric.

Topology: Wikipedia a major area of mathematics concerned with properties that are preserved under continuous deformations of objects, such as deformations that involve stretching, but no tearing or gluing. It emerged through the development of concepts from geometry and set theory, such as space, dimension, and transformation.

Ever since I was 10 I have mostly found myself in rooms where seeking cultural overlap was not exactly an option. Part of that is liberating. You enter into topology territory fast. The essence of what makes you human is not defined by if you have a limb or not. Cultural differences are a small matter compared to someone who might have missing legs.

"I had no shoes and complained, until I met a man who had no feet."
- Indian Proverb

I can get anal about racism. In the past I have reorganized my life in ways that I might never have to meet in person ever again some people who made racist comments in my presence. They can go out there and commit a hate crime and I'd treat that as an item on the evening news. But then you come into my personal space and you make a racist comment, that is a huge problem. You are asking to be hit back. It is not about equal and opposite reaction. It is about hitting back with tremendous, disproportionate force.

It is that same sense of personal space that makes me so very individualistic. And, no, that is not American influence. It came from deep inside, and it came early. When I showed up in Kentucky, the Senior Class President for when I became SGA President as a freshman said, "Paramendra, you are more individualistic than any American I ever met."

That might explain my very natural bonding with people who might fit the profile of the white male. I don't begrudge a people their democracy, I don't begrudge a people their market institutions, I don't begrudge a people their education, their success.

But I am hugely leery of things like groupthink, and glass walls and ceilings. Rape and sex are not the same thing.

It is outright disgusting to watch the internalized prejudice play out among the Madhesis in Queens. It is beyond disgusting when a Pahadi Nepali in Queens casually utters the word "madisey" which is calling someone the n-word.

The price tag on putting up with a racist/sexist comment/attitude is 10 million dollars, at least 10 million dollars. Would you put up with it if that is what you saw?

You see women put up with sexist comments and attitudes all the time. I lose respect fast. No, it is not pragmatism. It is mostly habit of mind. They do it even if the guy is absolutely irrelevant to their career aspirations. Oh no, you don't want to be seen picking fights with a white guy. That seems to be the attitude. What the.

Barack Obama's father showed up in Hawaii, and this was in the 1950s, early 1960s. He goes to a bar and a white guy calls him nigger. He walks over to the white guy and patiently explains why he should not say that, and he goes on to talk at length about where he came from, his heritage.

The white guy paid his expenses for two semesters.

I have issues with that reaction. When someone called you a nigger, he committed a social crime. And it should not be your problem. It should be society's problem. And the fuck with the free lodging.

I was walking on the outskirts of this town in Kentucky. And this redneck slows down his truck, and when he is right next to me he yells, "Nigger, go back to you country!" This was in the late 1990s.

And he speeds away.

I burst out laughing. I had never thought I was black. I still don't. I mean, I am not. It was exotic to get called that. But then months later I heard one white guy student refer to Arabs as "sand niggers." This was years before 9/11.

This plays out in relationship scenarios. People talk about falling in love. I am deeply skeptical of the concept. I don't see a ton of that happening. The collective identity rules. And then, within that collective, people fall in love. That is more than 90% of the people. And I don't really even have problems with that. If shared interests are a reason to get together, shared cultures are also legitimate acts, but at least be honest about it.

All else equal I would rather go for someone from a different background. I am individualistic like that. My we feeling does not seem to come from shared cultural backgrounds. I just don't seem to roll that way.