20 May 2011

Carry on Camping

According to Harold Camping, tomorrow is The Rapture. Not just any Rapture, THE Rapture people. The end of the world.

He of course predicted this before in the 90s but he claims a mathematical error was at fault rather than his being mental.

I wonder will he be disappointed tomorrow when the world doesn't end? Perhaps it'll end for him, he doesn't look long for this world.

I myself can't wait. I initially was looking forward to meeting the Lord our God and the father of the baby Jesus, but having given it some more thought, I fancy staying behind. It's what I've always wanted really, much much less people in the world. And it'll be the most fun people that are left.

I plan to move to Buckingham Palace and I will drive around in a Ferrari that I will steal from a deserted Ferrari dealership. I also plan to have a kick-about at the Emirates and eat all the sandwiches I can digest all free of charge. That's my idea of heaven.

Of course, apparently we only have until October to enjoy ourselves as this is when the Lord our God and the father of the baby Jesus will destroy the sinners and put the boring people back. Similar to what would have happened in Smallville had Clark not saved the day.

Therefore, I apologise to the Queen in advance for the mess. Sorry Ma'am.