Penn Satire, Since 1899

The Global Financial Crisis

Moderator: Welcome to day 4 of the University of Pennsylvania forum on the global economic crisis. For those of you just joining us, I will reintroduce the members of the panel:
-To my left is Dr. Steven Harm, professor of economics at Georgetown University.
-Next to him is Dr. Cassandra Bullock, professor of political science here at Penn.
-On Dr. Bullock’s left is Dr. Andre Corner, a professor of anthropology at the University of Delaware. I’m not sure why he’s here.
-To my right is my cousin Rick, his wife Ida, and their two kids Jeff and Miranda. They were on their way to New York when their car broke down so they’re currently staying in my basement.
-And finally, I am Pamela Drabeson, the moderator of the forum. I will now ask Ms. Johnson, the notetaker, to recap yesterday’s session. Ms. Johnson?
Ms. Johnson: Thank you. Yesterday’s session ended 9 hours early after a bird flew in through the window and freaked everybody out.

Moderator: Ah yes, I think we all remember the bird. With the formalities out of the way, let’s begin day 4 of the forum. Dr. Bullock, you asked to begin?

Dr. Bullock: Yes, thank you. I was hoping to begin today’s session by talking about the diversity of market structures that contributed to the economic collapse of-

Rick: -Excuse me Dr. Bullock I hate to interrupt but I have a question for the moderator.