"Independence is both elating and scary" Yes, yes. This is where I am. Fear has been my constant companion this year as I learn that apparently I am afraid of pretty much everything. I'm learning to work with her instead of trying to push her around.

expectations, push through it. exactly.and today i can relate to this in a special way: i got this offer today, which i'm really expected to say yes too, from practically everyone (incl myself), but i am a suspicious kind and can i really trust this whole idea and what if... worst case scenario etc. i'm supposed to make a decision tomorrow.