It was an interesting start to the poem and caught my attention. Again: imagery. Again, I saw it in my mind, and I really appreciate that about this story.

However, I did not understand this line and didn't really like it: "and his kisses grow up across my legs like weeds" I didn't like it because I didn't understand it, but maybe that's my problem, and not your's.

That is an insanely poetic line. The imagery in it is like a fist in the gut (in a... good way). I can actually imagine it - I keep on repeating that, but that's only because sometimes when I'm reading poems on FP, I have trouble imagining the scenarios in my head, but here it's effortless!

I also like your phrasing in this poem, because it's mighty powerful... Like this line, to give you an example: "Were is the beauty of it? The barren corners of idolatry"

It's so... pretty! My mouth went slack when I read it! What lovely imagery! It's just gorgeous, truly. I hope to one day be able to write like this...

I'm really liking how these poems veer between the sticky, repressed issue of Feminine Sexuality and deep Catholic (I'm assuming it's Catholic!) faith. It's interesting how you reconcile the two, only to seperate them again.

I liked the image of Jesus 'hanging' over the phonecord - it really grabbed my attention, maybe because it's not something you usually see mentioned in the same breath. Jesus and phonecords. So that really stuck with me. It was a very interesting image to have in my mind.

Just a little formatting thing, I think this poem would look better if the lines were like:

this

like

this

rather than:

like

this

this

I don't know, it's just a little quirk I have, but I think it'd look better the way I said. Not that I know much about anything!

I actually read this a long time ago at work and didn't have time to review it. Then I took a long break from reading it again. I got lazy I suppose, so now I'm back to resume what I started long ago: reading and reviewing each chapter of this mansion.

I love your setting. For me, July is winter with a few warm days thrown in to taunt me. There are no fireworks, no real heat and it typically boring but your July (being an American July) is full of events. The setting reminded me of Miami for some reason, but thats besides the point.

The emotion in the poem was far stronger than the setting. It seemed to be written in a rushed kinda way, almost in a fever (again, heat? or am I stretching there?) The rape and the car crash mentioned (though as stated the crash is yet to happen) both add an incredibal amount of tragedy. 'Ally is crying in your arms' is another one of your iconic lines that seems to stem from an unimaginable truth. The way you so often do that in this series haunts me. Late at night when I can't sleep I sometimes think of images I get from your writing. This chapter will add to that archive.

Lastly, the format. Not much to say, but I like it. Its interesting without being too original, and its easy to read. The ending seemed too sad.

Great chapter, Juliet. Once again, sorry for taking so long to review this. I suppose this is the upside to having the flu and not being at work.

Woohoo! There's actually punctuation in this piece! And every comma and period is exactly where it should be. Where the punctuation is usually lacking and lessens your poetry, the punctuation in this poem totally enhances the poem. Great job!

I believe this is when the Mansion is at its best: when it's wearing a skimpy outfit while taking on religion, meaning that the poem keeps its sexuality while still talking about a serious subject matter.

The beginning of the poem is brilliant. The whole first stranza is five-star. Every stanza is powerful, though.

[lusty men are like bible salesmen] One of my favorite lines.

Great job with this poem, Juliet! I look forward to more visits to the mansion.

This is another poem that suffers from bad grammar. But I'm not going to let that ruin the poem for me. I'll just place the commas and pauses where they should be as I read along. If I do that then I realize just how good this poem really is.

[just on the cusp of not giving a shit] LOL. I love this line. It makes me smirk everytime.

[just between the two of us / I don’t care about love anymore / I just want to fall asleep with someone next to me.] Wow, strong ending.

Like I said in the beginning, once I look past the grammar issues, this poem is actually very good. Nice sexual imagery. I could totally visualize this guy and girl up against one another. The whole poem has a very sardonic tone, which I love.