Today, I woke up early so went to Tesco as my son needed some new pajamas and other stuff. I also wanted to see what cheap books they had there.

After I bought my stuff, I had breakfast there but there was a really whingy little boy sitting just across from me with his Mam. The winging escalated into crying, which then became screaming - his Mam was basically ignoring him and reading a magazine.

Me: Hiya, nice day today ... is he okay?
Woman: Morning, yeah - he's always like that.
Me: I've got a Bob The Builder phone in one of my bags, you think he might like to play with it?
Woman: Duno.Me: Gives the kid the phone, he stops crying straight away.
Woman: Thanks.
Me: No problem, my son is about the same age - when I take him somewhere like this, I usually take a toy with me - shuts him up straight away when he's being a nuisance.
Woman: Was he being a nuisance, then?
Me: Kinda, he is adorable tho'.
Woman: Well, he is now that he's smiling! I'll remember next time to bring a game for him.
Me: (thinks) My work here is done

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Jonno < manker.

I plan on beating him to death with his kids. I'll use them as a bludgeon on his face. ---Good for them if they survive.