Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Tuesday August 17th just before 2am I woke up because I felt a little off. I went to get out of bed and my water broke. I called my midwife and let her know that my water broke, but I wasn't having contractions. She said to call her back when I started having contractions. We hung up. I decided to wait to call my IM as nothing was happening and there was no use in her losing sleep. I figured I would call when I started having regular contractions.

I tried to rest, but was a bit uncomfortable. I was having some contractions but they weren't regular. They were fluctuating between 3 and 5 minutes. I probably should have called my midwife, but I felt that because she has three kids she shouldn't be called out of bed until they were regular...boy did I learn something about that logic!

At this point I was sitting at my computer playing games. I realized the contractions were much stronger and taking my breath away. I got up and walked from my desk to the bedroom to wake my hubby and then to call my midwife. I had a contraction on the walk into the bedroom, and another when I got in there. They were two minutes apart and lasting about two minutes. I called my midwife (who, BTW, lives an hour and a half way). She told me she would call her assistant (who only lived 30 minutes away) and let her know that it was time to head over. Because of issues with my bank card, my birth kit hadn't been ordered yet, so Alisa, the assistant midwife stopped by her birth center to pick up one of her kits for me. This was at 4 am.

As soon as I got off the phone with my midwife, I called my IM. She said she would book the first flight she could and would be there in ASAP! Hubby fielded a call from Sam, my midwife, who told him to keep me in bed on my side until she got there. I told him I had to pee first. I had a contraction walking into the bathroom. Hubby had run and grabbed the sheets to make the bed so I could labor there if I wanted. While in the bathroom I had another painful contraction. I got down on all fours because I couldn't stand and I was afraid if I sat on the toilet I would start pushing. Hubby had already told me I wasn't allowed to push. Well, while I was on all fours, I had another contraction and felt the urge to push. Between contractions I didn't have to push, but during them, I wanted to so bad. Instead, I tried to breath.

It was at this point, while in the bathroom on all fours, that hubby looked in from making the bed and realized what was going on. Now I blame on the TLC birth stories and such that I watch for educating this man on different birth positions...either way, he told me to get up because I wasn't allowed to do anything that would progress labor before one of the midwives got there. He got me out of the bathroom and into bed. I laid on my left side and tried to breath. He pushed on my back and talked me through each contraction telling me to blow. Between contractions, he ran to the dryer to warm towels and prepared the bedroom. The entire time he was on the phone with Sam telling her what was going on.

Sam kept telling me I was doing great. I felt like I was losing control. My body went on autopilot and no matter how hard I tried, it did what nature taught it to do on instinct. With each contraction I would blow and pant and squeeze my husband's hand...and with each contraction my body would slowly start pushing him further out. I could feel him move out, and then as the contraction ended he slid back up inside. Sam kept saying I was doing great. Kenny was giving her moment by moment updates. He kept trying to get me to breath...and I kept trying to hold him in until someone arrived.

Have you ever seen the movie Rat Race? You know when the family is in the car and the girl says she has to use the bathroom. The tells her to hold it, and she says she's "prarie dogging." Well, I told Kenny I was prarie dogging and he kind of laughed...until the next contraction. He immediately told Sam the baby's head was poking out. About 1/4 of it was showing. She asked what color it was. He told her flesh colored. I said that he was moving between contractions, which is a good sign and I remembered this from my midwifery books. I had another contraction and didn't think I could wait another minute. That was when Alisa came walking in!

Because of my history of postpartum bleeding she drew up a shot of Pitocin, had me roll onto my back and with one breath (literally, I breathed through and barely pushed) Michael's head was out. Sam came running in, and with that last push (I actually got to push on that one!) his body was out. I couldn't believe I had managed to keep him until the midwives arrived. It was 504am.

I got to cut Michael's umbilical cord. I didn't bleed at all. I delivered the placenta and was doing great. Alisa and Sam held Michael while Kenny ran and got coffee and breakfast. I started to feel a little off and got a shot of Pitocin to slow the bleeding that had started.

That's when things get a bit more fuzzy for me. I know that I had a slow trickling bleed that was well maintained by my midwives. I got two shots of Pitocin and then a Methargine. I lost enough blood to make me going into shock...but just less than enough to need to be transported and have a transfusion and all that crap. I'm so glad I had Sam there to help me maintain my composure. I trust her fully, so when she told me I wasn't going to die, I just needed to relax and drink some more, I believed her. (Although there was a moment when I was on my back, getting oxygen and it sounded like I was underwater and I couldn't focus that I wondered...)

When T, my IM arrived, I was so proud to hand her her son. I had already said my goodbyes...it was time for her to say hello. I gave her a hug and she admired her little man. He immediately showed her what has become my favorite thing about him...he clasps his hands together across his chest, interlocking his fingers, as though he were praying. It's only appropriate considering his name. Michael means "who is like God" and Christopher means "Christ-like." Maybe all those prayers I said all those months ago while being sick on the floor in the bathroom had more influence on him than I thought.

I'm healing well. Kenny is following the midwife's orders to a T. I'm not allowed to do much of anything today. Tonight I can take a car ride. We're going to ride to Sonic for slushes. If I'm lucky tomorrow I'll get to go to my youngest's Meet the Teacher night at school. It will be a little walking around, but I think it'll be good for me to get out.

I'm still not sure what this journey was supposed to teach me, but I'm sure I'll figure it out. Either way, this chapter in my life is coming to an end. I'm excited to see what the next chapter brings!

So yesterday I wasn't feeling well. I thought I was dehydrated as no matter how much I drank I wasn't urinating. Then it started to feel like if I didn't go I was going to explode...but I still couldn't pee. My back started to ache and no matter what I tried, I couldn't get comfortable. When I would go into the bathroom only a few trickles of urine would come out. I was really starting to get worried!

Around 1030pm I took two Tylenol, a Holy Basil, a melatonin, and a Unisom...my nightly routine. (Well, I don't normally take Tylenol, but the pain was growing so intense, I had to!) I was hoping to be able to fall asleep and wake in the morning feeling better!

I dozed off for about 30 minutes. I woke around 1120pm and was in so much pain! I just knew I was in labor! I tried to time the contractions, but they were constant...there was no break! I sat on my birth ball in order to progress things and figure out what was going on and that's when it hit me. While I was having contractions, that's not what the pain was from. My back was killing me! My bladder was on fire! And to top it off, I swear I felt a direct line from the pain in my back to my bladder.

It was then it dawned on me. I had a kidney infection. I gave myself an hour to start peeing (because I still hadn't peed...at all) and then I was going to the hospital. I drank three more glasses of water and around midnight I went to the bathroom because I felt (again) like I had to urinate.

...and boy did I go!

Have you ever seen A League of Their Own? You know the scene where the girls are in the locker room and Tom Hanks comes in drunk and goes into the bathroom and starts peeing...and one of the girls starts timing him when it seems as though he's been peeing forever. Yep, that was me! I must have easily released half a gallon of urine! Every drop of it burned coming out, but I felt so much relief in that moment!

When I went to wipe, there was some puss with pink tinge. There was more in the bowl. There were also two floating "balls" surrounded by puss. (They weren't that big all...about the size of well of the period on this page. I probably wouldn't have even seen them if not for the fact that they were literally coated in bloody puss.) I grabbed a cup and fished them out of the bowl. I had just passed two kidney stones.

About an hour later, around 1am, I passed a third one. After that I slept like a rock. I felt so good! Today's a little bit of a different story. I feel like someone punched me in the kidney. It's nothing like it was yesterday...more like it's bruised. I told my husband that when I got up off the birth ball last night to try to go, I had already put clothes on because I fully expected to be leaving for the hospital a few moments after. He said he did too. I called my PCP (primary care physician) and he told me to save the stones and set up and appointment for Monday. He's going to send me to a urologist as this is the fourth time I've passed a kidney stone. (This being the most severe with me passing three stones at once.)

What I can't believe: This little guy managed to stay put through all of that! He's been moving just fine today with a regular, strong heartbeat. I'm so glad that it didn't affect him! There was a point last night where I was certain he was going to make an appearance. I had everything prepared and the list of phone numbers for hubby to call ready. The only thing I was waiting on was a good set of contractions to show I was in labor and it was go time. I can't imagine how bad I would have felt calling everyone and getting them all up and ready to go...only to pass some kidney stones and have it be a false alarm!

The day is coming though. And when it does, I'll be prepared. (As I'm sure his parents will be!)

I finally got off bed rest today. We decided to take the boat out to celebrate. The kids had fun riding the tube. I even managed to convince hubby try knee boarding. It was a great day on the lake!

I have a headache and I think I may be slightly dehydrated. I drank six bottles of water and two Gatorades, but...well, putting it bluntly, I'm not peeing.

The little guy is doing great! He's been active today. He seems to know when I'm in, on or near water. He always gets more active. He's slowed down a bit over the past hour, but he's probably exhausted!

After talking to a prominent surrogacy lawyer in Texas and getting her advice and take on things, we finally have the PBO. I don't know what was going on with that, but it was completely and utterly ridiculous!

The reason I stopped writing my blog was because something I had said in it seemed to upset my IM and she emailed me about it. Whatever her truth was, it wasn't the same as the lawyer's truth...and now that we've had to deal with both of them, I don't think either truth was reality. I think they both had some reality to their truth, but each had bits and pieces missing. I don't think any of it was done maliciously, I just think that no one really stopped to think of the long term consequences that this could have on me and my family.

Whatever the case may be, PBO paperwork is finally finished and I don't have to worry about that anymore.

I'm still stuck on bedrest. Hubby emailed my IM to let her know, and so far as I know she hasn't emailed him back yet. She certainly hasn't emailed me. That hurts. I'm carrying her child and she hasn't bothered to ask how I'm doing. Screw me...she hasn't bothered to email and ask her son is doing even. I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. She's visiting family right now, so I assume she's probably busy.

Only two more days of lying here bed and I get to get up! I'm so ready to be done with bed rest. I have no idea how women can do this for weeks on end. I'm a fairly active person and not being able to sit up, or get up, or do anything but lay here in bed is driving me nuts!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

For reasons I can't get into right now, I will no longer be blogging during this pregnancy. Once the child is born, I will publish the blogs I wrote during this time.

Lastly, I'm asking for prayers. I'm currently on bed rest until next weekend. I started having contractions that were hard and close together. Being that I"m only 36 weeks, we want to keep the little guy in for (at the very least) another week.