Exploring the world of blogging & hoping to make some new friends. Trying to survive being a stay at home mom temporarily living in Em's world...but looking to get back a little bit of me and start to enjoy Jujukat's world again!!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Another Monday, another day of TRYING to lose weight. With my PCOS it's so hard to lose weight. I struggle just to not gain weight. After high school I started to put some weight on, but nothing crazy. When I felt like I was uncomfortable, I would just 'eat less'- I never really dieted or thought about dieting. When I was 26 I met the man of my dreams and even though I was about 35lbs heavier and 2sizes bigger than HS- I was happy & totally comfortable with who I was. Over the next 2-3yrs it seemed like every time I stepped on the scale I was 5lbs heavier. No matter what I did, I just was gaining, and quickly. About 6mos before I got married I found out I had PCOS. When I was planning my wedding (50lbs heavier than when I met hubby) I felt ucky and uncomfortable and was beginning to hate buying clothes. 2yrs later I FINALLY became pregnant (another 30lbs heavier). I actually did very well with my weight when I was pregnant, because PCOS has a lot to do with hormones, for 40wks I was 'normal'. After having my daughter I lost all my 'baby weight' by wk 3....but soon after I stopped nursing, again crazy hormones, I gained all the baby weight back. Now somehow and somewhere during the past 3 1/2yrs I have gained approx. 40lbs!!!! It seems like for the past 1 1/2yrs I have been struggling to maintain this CRAZY WEIGHT!!!! and thru that time I have maintained and not gained anymore- That to me is an accomplishment. I don't want to stay where I am. But of course for a MILLION & ONE reasons I want to lose weight. If I could lose 30lbs I would like to start ttc and then if I can lose 40lbs I will be at the same weight as my first OBGYNappt. So from there I would obviously try to continue losing...... If I were lucky to have another baby- I would do so many things different after their birth. When we are in the 'country' I will have more options for exercise and outdoorsy kinds of things. Living in the 'city' I feel like I am sometimes stuck inside. (WHOA-am I babbling or what??) So I am counting my WW pts today, with what little food is in the house-so far so good.......I NEED to do this!!!!!!!!

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Yay, you can do it! I had a "moment" myself today...got dressed, my pants (and everything else I tried on) was too tight AND after looking at pics of myself this weekend...I cried. :-( So I told myself (and Big D) that i was joining the gym. TONIGHT. And I'm going to start tracking calories on myfoodjournal.com (Michele turned me on to that site,I love it). I'm wishing us both luck!! I, too, want to lose weight before I get pregnant (although if I got pregnant now, I wouldn't say "no" LOL). I would like to be about 20 lbs. lighter and feel more comfortable in my own skin. Cuz lately I feel nothing but uncomfortable. ANd it makes me sad!

Monday's Weigh-In Day

About Me

I'm a happily married Mom of a beautiful 4yr old girl. My husband is my best friend. I love a good mystery and anything that can't be explained. I believe in Big Foot,ghosts, aliens and my husband thinks that is weird, but still loves me. I love to read and watch TV (maybe too much). I can go shopping for one thing and take 2 hours doing that. I love a good bargain and have to tell everyone about it. I can babble with the best of them and have been known to talk a bit too much. So, welcome to my blog....