Woman Wearing Headphones Impatiently Waiting for Men to Hit on Her

Sasha Reed of Nevada City noticed that men avoid speaking with her while she’s wearing headphones.

Nevada City, CA — An area woman expressed irritation at what she calls, “an unwillingness to man up,” when she wears her headphones in public.

Sasha Reed of Nevada City, CA has repeatedly experienced a shocking amount of neglect while doing everything from working out to driving around. Accordingly, she said, her self-esteem has begun to suffer.

“I don’t know when it started,” she said, “but I realized a few months ago that I couldn’t remember the last time a man had waved his hand in front of my face while I was trying to read on the bus so he could tell me how great my tits are.”

It was then, she said, that she recognized the pattern.

“Every time I wear my headphones in public, men seem scared to interact with me. It’s almost like they think I just want to be left alone to use the treadmill or something instead of being asked what I’m doing that night and pressed for my phone number.”

While she admits her informal study doesn’t adhere to strict social science methodology, she said she asked other women about their experiences and discovered mixed results.

“Some of the truly masculine, I mean the alpha males we women fawn over every night in their dreams, are able to push past the fake ‘red light’ we’re signaling when we wear headphones. But many men were just too respectful.”

Reed is not sure what her observations signify, but has vowed to go without music from now on, and even smile more so men find her more pleasing to look at.

“If I don’t get my leg humped while I’m trying to drink a cup of coffee soon I’m going to explode,” she added wistfully.

When Jon was a little bitty baby his mama would rock him in the cradle in the old cotton fields where he's from. Growing up in the deep south, he learned to take a punch, a skill he carries with him to this day and looks to pass on to future generations of Reremies. After the tragic monster truck accident that claimed the life of his latest wife, all pending charges were dropped, leaving Jon to pursue his dream of marrying someone younger, hotter, and dirtier. As his hunt continues, Jon lurks around the local junior college, where he hopes to earn his doctorate by attending several classes a month, that he may one day stop lying about having one. When he's not studying or leching, Jon maintains an active television-viewing schedule. On the rare occasion inspiration strikes, he strikes back.

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