Things To Do In Berlin #2: Buy A New Smile

What? Huh? A new smile? Yup, made to measure just for you. No pain – and within about an hour’s time if you’re in a hurry.

Who’s the best guide to a city, someone who loves it?
Think again.
It’s someone who’s booooored by it. Or so I say. And since I’m constantly bored in Berlin (underground parties, fashion weeks, openings-shmopenings, beentheredonethat), I tend to find eccentric things instead. And so I’m starting a new series: weird things to do in Berlin!

Enter: Testeneers

Founded by a team of dental technology rockstars from Berlin, lächeln2go (“take-away smile”) make testeneers, unique jewels that you put on your teeth to make them look whiter and healthier and younger. See that little shiny on my finger tip? It’s a fang. I ordered just two of them (approx. €80 each).

What? A DENTAL SHOP? Before you burst out and LOL, the testeneers (a trademark product) are individual tooth embellishers. Either for fun (mine are elegant vampire fangs) or for checking out a new smile option before heading to an actual dentist. Oh, the testeneeers are made within an hour, the process is pain-free. The quality is your “made in a German dental lab” at its best.

Don’t worry, I’ll spare you a close-up of my teeth 😉What I like about this crazy idea is that you don’t need to go to a doctor to get those; the staff are amazing – and each “testeneer” is hand-made, modelled for the perfect fit; not too white-ish, with little irregularities that make them appear like real, natural teeth, not the plastic fantastic you sometimes see in people who overdo their dental embellishment.

In fact, they’re like coloured contact lenses, or artificial nails – just not for your eyes/nails but for your teeth. The lächeln2go team evaluate what nature gave you and make suggestions. Or you just walk in and ask for vampire fangs, like me.

Each set includes testeneers (as many as you order/need), a brush to cleanse them, and a little jar of a non-toxic glue. While you can’t – mustn’t actually – eat with the ‘neers in, you can smile, talk, even cautiously drink. I went to readings, and they didn’t change the way I spoke. Now, my couple of ‘neers don’t make for a True Blood sort of vamp smile, but they do create a look of “she has rather distinctive canines”. Which is highly appropriate. For reading stories of macabre of course 😉

I have really no idea why not more beauty or Berlin bloggers discover this absolutely weird and brilliant venture. I mean, how cool is that: a brand new smile overnight?”

UPDATE:
It occurred to me thanks to the lovely comments and to a comment offline that I maybe forgot to mention three important things!

1. This is of course not a sponsored post. I met the founder and the team through a friend who’s married to the founder’s brother, but the fangs cost me money – with no reductions.2. When I wear the fangs for longer than 40 minutes, I start feeling a tension. If I don’t remove them then soonish, I’m in for some headache. Not sure why it’s so, maybe it’s my individual reaction.3. They’re not made for fun initially. For example, you plan to have veneers or other aesthetic corrections made but dread to end up with an artificial “fence” in your mouth. In such a case, the testeneers are great help – the team will take care of creating a truly harmonic appearance, and if you’re happy, you can run to your dentist, if you’re not happy, it’s only a “cover”, and your teeth are as they were.

Now, what tooth embellishment would you order to try it?
Would you at all? Do you like such things?Maybe for an event or for a photo?Or would you only try them on if you were planning to get “real” veneers?How far would you go for a perfect smile?Do tell.

I forgot to mention that if I wear the “fangs” for longer than 30-40 minutes, the pressure becomes tangible; and if I don’t remove them, I get a headache. but for a reading it was fab. next time I’ll make sure not to arrive with those glued in, but to put them on on loc.
but I just like how crazy it is. and actually HELPFUL for people who wnat to change their teeth but fear to have the teeth ruined. I was told by the team that I can go with the models to my dentist and have veneers or crowns, whatever, modelled 100% alike.

exactly.
I was quite impressed to see how much changes through not even as much as a milimeter added! they do take before&after pics of customers (though I cowardly objected… didn’t want to end up on a flyer or in an advertorial) and those are incredible.

Leave it to you to come up with a “weird things to do in Berlin” concept. I dig it 🙂 I do believe we need a selfie of some vampire fangs. Don’t you think? I’ve asked myself the same thing about colored contact lenses. In the end, no I wouldn’t because if someone complimented my eyes, I’d know it’s fake. I like to keep things real around here. As far as teeth, as my grandmother used to proudly say: “I still have all my own teeth.” I guess when you reach a certain age, it’s ok to boast about that. I’ll have to think about the testeneers. I have whitened and that’s been very good. As always, Nath, a ridiculously unique post that’s fun to read :-)!!

well as to the lenses, I’m too afraid to put stuff in my eyes. I can’t even wear contact lenses! I tried once, and they were state-of-the-art super moist (=all damn slippery like tiny jellyfish!) but then they would stick to my eyeballs and the doc needed a device to pull them out. TRAUMATIZED! 😀

thank you for the kudos 😉 I wonder now if I made this post sound TOO funny. after all, it’s serious dental medicine, and if I had to get veneers or whatnot modelled, I would come running to this lab. I saw the ladies craft the tiny ‘neers. it’s like a jeweller workshop.

GET IMMEDIATE ACCESS TO NEW POSTS

Enter your email to never miss a post – no spam, no selling, just the notifications! (Super simple: enter your email, and you will receive an opt-in message you'll have to confirm – make sure to check your junk mail folder).

MY “BOOKSHELF MONTHLY” READ:

[The book cover above is an affiliate link: you can now support our work by simply buying books you like. Brilliant!]

The BEAUTYCALYPSE woman wants to enjoy her glamourous beauty products and to satisfy her unique fashion sense – but she wants to be sure they will not harm her, other people, or the environment.

The BEAUTYCALYPSE man chooses healthy and organic skincare products and seeks the healthiest balance for his busy lifestyle.

Noticing each other and helping each other is not a blurry new age mantra, but words to live by: "Treat others like you want to be treated" is a classic - and BEAUTYCALYPSE readers don't want the price of their product choices to be death, destruction or intoxication.