Saturday, May 10, 2014

This post was written on the day I dropped Jack off at what is now his new school. His 2nd new school in one school year. I was proud of him then. I am even prouder now when I think of what he has gone through, how well he has adjusted, and how much he is flourishing there. He is not "the new kid" any more. He is well-liked, accepted and has certainly found a school "family" and friends that encourage and support. We adore this new school.I sat in the
car with a huge lump in my throat.A few
hot tears may have made their way down my cheeks.I am so proud of this kid.

I dropped
him off with an eager attitude.How is
it that he can have such confidence?I
would love to think I had something to do with that but I am not sure.How can he still be so open-minded to another
new school? New friends?New
system?Another change?

I didn’t
know what to the “title” of this post should be.I debated between “Reasons why I will never
forgive myself for not listening to my inner voice”, and “Reasons why I will
never forgive the public school system” and “Mother of the year, once
again”.But really this is not about
me.Or the sucky school
system.It’s about Jack.

I had
shushed my inner voice that nagged me that something was not quite right.For years.

I listened
to the teachers (including ones that I highly respected) tell me that he was
“fine”.For years.The preschool teachers that said he was
absolutely ready for Kindergarten.The
seasoned 1st grade teacher who said, “He is fine!”.The young 4th grade teacher who
said, “My husband can’t read aloud very well either (hee hee)”.The speech teacher who labeled him with
“language processing” issues but released him from services at the end of 5th
grade.

I knew there
could be something going on but when a child brings home an “Honor Roll”
certificate both semesters from a really really tough middle school, you
question yourself.Even though you know
how hard he worked to get there.

(Last school year- public middle school)

And so we
decided to finally get some answers and have a psychoeducational evaluation
done for Jack.Privately, of course,
because even though we knew it was
necessary, the school basically laughed at the mere suggestion.“He is doing too good” is basically what our
answer was.

And that
could have been Jack’s downfall or at least the reason we didn’t do this
sooner.He’s just too darn good.

That’s why
(as my husband said in our somewhat heated SST meeting at the school after the
evaluation results were in our hands) he has “fallen through the cracks” all
these years.He is not a problem in
school.In fact, he’s the opposite.In preschool he always followed directions,
sat quietly and transitioned well.In
elementary and middle school he is a rule follower.A conscientious student.Makes friends easily.Is athletic and popular.No red flags here.

But we
suspected…

But we
didn’t expect a "diagnosis" of dyslexia.

Even though
I consider myself somewhat familiar with dyslexia- I know that it doesn’t just
mean reversals, etc- I just didn’t suspect it. He can read!Just a little slower than other kids his
age.A little less comprehension going
on there.

But it was
still pretty surprising.Relieving
too.Nice to have an explanation.An answer to our question.

He is
relieved too.He was not upset when we
told him.He was relieved, too.Kinda like if you put glasses on someone who
had bad vision for years but didn’t realize it.

I have been
telling almost everyone.It’s weird. But
I am proud of this “label” and of this child. I was so proud last year when he brought home
those Honor Roll certificates.

But they
have a whole new meaning now.I am SO
proud of this boy.

Today I
dropped him off at a private school just for children with dyslexia.He is going to “shadow” a student for a
day.And he was so excited.

The 7th
grade has only 15 kids in it.That’s way different from what he’s used
to.So, I have no idea what he’s going
to think about it.But, we are pretty
sure he will not be going back to his public school next semester (per a few
recommendations and our instinct, knowledge on what he needs now, etc).

Our goal now
is to get Jack where he needs to be.Find
the place that’s right for him.