Thursday, April 28, 2011

Boring and stressful, they make us forget our normal lives and dwell on the mysteries of why a certain theorist thought demand would act in such and such manner if this and this happens. I mean, don't we have enough in our teenage lives already, that we have to wonder what made Pythagoras think along triangles to muddle normal people?

Yet, however fast we try to run, it ends with us being on a treadmill. We HAVE to give exams no matter what, even if they aren't designed to test the actual knowledge we've gained and we have to slog away HOURS cramming useless lines!

This exam season, I thought I would do some social service (it doesn't have anything to do with my pundit saying I'll score more if I do this, I swear) and share some tips and tricks to happily (honest!) give our examinations.

1. The rare classes that you actually attend- make them useful! Drooling and day dreaming (which, sadly, most of us do) is just a waste of time. You could benefit from actually listening to the teacher. You won't even have to read your notes if you just remember what the teacher said, thus saving a lot of valuable time you could use on Facebook, drooling and day dreaming ;).

2. Keep a tab on the mysterious people in your class who have the time and energy to attend all lectures and keep their notes up to date. Say Hi to them once in a while (you could use sunglasses if you're afraid to be caught by your friends). Believe me, when you ask them for help, they'll be excited! You'll make someone happy! AND you get the notes.

3. Burn the Midnight Oil. For those really dumb people who don't know it's a phrase, I don't mean that literally. You may love your sleep, but considering you have no idea about the subject, it will help to say goodbye to your sleep for a few days and get to know what to write in the exam! (PS. I don't leave my sleep, not even for exams. I just wrote it in the hope of writing something that sounds intelligent. Even if it doesn't, well, I've already written it!).

4. When your best friend says something is important, it IS important! Don't you get it? (S)He spied for long to be sure of 'important' stuff, because, like you, (s)he hadn't even known the syllabus! Be happy you got in on the secret AND of course, read the stuff. (I personally recommend asking your bestie to explain it to you, you would save a lot of time. Plus- according to a study- you tend to remember things you hear more than what you read).

5. Go to the examination hall in a neat, proper dress. Preferably wear specs (you could use those zero numbered ones if your eyes aren't weak), carry a proper and full pencil case and walk confidently (don't think about how you keep on forgetting the name of the subject, focus on walking!). Chances are, the teacher won't even look in your direction (err.. except maybe if you look exceptionally good . Note: Dress modestly). You'll look like a decent, intelligent kid (LOL, as if!) and if the invigilator is fooled, you can easily copy from your partner! ;)

Lastly, be serious. It's exam time. Get out the nerdy classmate's phone number (if you don't have it, hire a spy and find it out!!!), go to the stationery shop and buy new pens (remember how you used to get all excited earlier, at the prospect of getting new pens?), get all your notes in order (use all your superpowers and find them out from unimaginable places, from under the bed, for instance), get your phone charged up and patiently wait for your best friend's call! They never desert you. :)