Three American Icons on Beauty, Flaws, and the Concept of Aging

Once upon a time, conventional wisdom was that, as women, we didn’t relate to those much younger or older than us. But we live in a different world today. The boundaries between generations are blurred: Women of all ages now share a common culture; they’re more likely to watch the same TV shows, exercise together, even wear the same clothes. In that spirit, we invited some of the most interesting women we know to name the women they’re inspired by for our May issue. Next up: musician Debbie Harry, dancer Judith Jamison, and model Pat Cleveland—each pioneers; each with profound beauty wisdom. We bow down.

“When it comes to age and beauty, there’s always been a double standard for women. Let’s face it, the pressure is on. But if that little voice in the back of your head is worrying about getting old, well, there’s no way you’re not going to get old. You have to get tough. You have to say, ‘Hey. I’m in good health, and I appreciate myself.’ On any given day I want to be satisfied with the way I look, but after I get to that point, I don’t think about it: I want to socialize, meet people, talk, have fun. We all have those low moments when we’re criticizing or doubting ourselves—I’m not saying I don’t have that, because I certainly do. But my mother used to tell me, ‘No matter how old you get, in your brain you’re going to think you’re 25.’ And that’s not a bad thing!”

Groundbreaking dancer and choreographer and the artistic director emeritus of the Alvin Ailey Dance Theater; 73

“I was this tall, skinny-skinny-legged thing with dark chocolate brown skin and short hair, yet I was constantly encouraged by my parents. But when you get older and into the profession of dance—that’s about competition and body image. There were times I felt insecure. Then came the revelation: Who else looks like this? There’s only one of you! You must cling to that and how incredible that is, especially at 70 or 80. There’s only one of you. If I have creases in my face, they exist because I smiled, I frowned, I did everything in between. Wear your life beautifully on your face. Force yourself to love it, because you aren’t getting another chance. The curtain went up when you were born, and it’s not coming down until you’re in the ground. So please, enjoy this performance.”

One of the first African-American supermodels and muse to Karl Lagerfeld and Salvador Dalí; 66

“You have to see your flaws as the most beautiful things about you. I had a friend in Hollywood who did her nose in her thirties, and years later she looked at my nose and my daughter’s nose and said, ‘I wish I still had my nose.’ You can’t be somebody else. In every season there’s a flower that blooms, and it’s beautiful in its own time, but that doesn’t mean the plant stops growing afterward; it doesn’t mean that you stop growing afterward. It just means another element of beauty is coming. Butterfly yourself, girlfriend! Color your hair or do whatever you have to do to make yourself happy with what you’ve got. I know, I have caterpillar moments—but there are times when I spread my wings and I’m fluttering all over. Find ways to wake up every morning and say, ‘Oh. I’m alive!’”