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Wannabe stand-ups normally face years slogging around the open-mic circuit before proving themselves worthy of coveted stage time at Britain’s biggest comedy clubs.

But one prestigious venue is offering comic hopefuls the chance to skip all that experience-building rigmarole – and simply buy their slot under the spotlight.

The Glee Club in Birmingham has decided to auction off a ten-minute slot on one of its high-profile Friday-night gigs to the highest bidder.

In the name of charity, the venue has set up an auction on eBay for the chance to perform for five minutes at the show on October 12.

Bidding opened this afternoon and closes on October 6. The winner chooses which charity their cash goes t, but the venue will match it – up to a £2,000 limit – with donations to their favourite causes, SIFA (Supporting Independence from Alcohol) and the British Heart Foundation.

The instructions for the auction warn: ‘If you've never been to a comedy club before, this is probably not for you. If you've never done a stand-up gig before, think carefully. It's not the same as telling a couple of gags to your mates in the pub - no matter how funny they SAY you are. It's hot, there's bright lights and a lot of people watching - it can be terrifying

The club had another warning for the successful bidder: ‘If you go on stage and act like an idiot, our bouncers will give you a very big cuddle and maybe a quick snog – to put it politely.’

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