Wednesday, September 17, 2008

DAY NUMBER ONE IN LONDON.....

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails.EXPLORE. DREAM. DISCOVER."

-MARK TWAIN

I made it. I've realized that there's a slight chance I may be too vain for this type of traveling. I wanted to get on and say, "Everything is splendid!!!! I've already met five new best friends from five different countries and I had a slice of humble pie....." The thing about traveling is, no matter where you go the stupid and very trivial things follow you if you aren't consciously aware of changing the thought process...... Insecurities don't just fall away when you decide to go to a country where you know no one....I wanted to kick myself in the face today when I was sitting in Piccadilly Circus and I started thinking, "Man. My face looks fat." WHAT?! Why the fuck was I thinking that???? Why did I have to pull the nuerotic girl card and start mentally noting how much mozzarella I had just eaten? Why does it matter??? The truth is, at this very moment I AM EXACTLY who and where I need to be, moon face or not.

Why wasn't I just enjoying the moment and running off to get a scone with Devonshire cream. The fact that I even bothered to bring oil sheets and eye liner in my purse made me feel like such a tool.

I'm hoping that it's just a case of travelers grumpiness, jet lag, or acknowledging that sometimes I'm....human? A woman? Entirely too hard on myself and that I need to just chill out. Sometimes even the most whimsical, seemingly carefree people can let shallow things hinder their thinking. Who the fuck cares if I look like Bridget Jones? Colin Firth was down with the "wobbly bits."

Even though I'm here....I'm still nervous. My hostel is making me nervous, getting lost today for four hours made me nervous....even though there were people everywhere. Being NERVOUS is making me nervous? All dizzy and jumpy like. Like a little Chihuahua. I'm talking fast and my selfdeprecating humor is actually fitting in well with the humor or the Brits, so I'm at least making myself look like an idiot when I feel like an idiot has made a few people laugh. With me or at me.

On a separate note:

A few things to remember that often slip your mind while traveling:

-Your feet swell, so please...buy a size larger than usual this is a lesson in :Mind over matter while your feet are bleeding but you really want to walk to Buckingham Palace....pain is mental.

-Starbucks will haunt you everywhere. So will McDonald's....but please, gag me once I see a Wal-mart. It's disappointing that Europe thinks Burger King and Abercrombie and Fitch are worthy of their foreign soil. Lesson: Every country likes greasy food and men with six packs in their underwear......two universal loves.

- You'll most likely get seated next to Mr. HOBO (Horribly Offensive Body Oder) on the plane or the train or whatever and that is to teach you these lessons in: tolerance and tact enough not to cover your face with your scarf for nine hours.

-Hostels are gross. Get over it. Lesson: this is my inner self telling me not to be such a snob.....but really is it snobby to like a single person shower and a bed sans bed bugs?

-Learn to like George Michael and Kylie Minogue....I seriously did hear them three separate times today. Lesson: Native music may have you doing the locomotion.

-Even when you're thousands of miles away from home the issues that taunt us still carry over. Lesson: PRACTICE BEING PRESENT.

So far I have already hopped on the double Decker, BRIGHT RED, tourist bus to see the major attractions....very worth it might I add. Tomorrow I'll be dedicated to my musical roots and taking a rock and roll tour (with a large Beatles influence) and I may get out and do some sort of tour around the countryside. Also on the agenda: Cruise down the Thames river, Jack the Ripper walking Tour, watch the changing of the guards.....share a drink with Lily Allen. I am convinced her and I would be friends, even though she was snarky to Sir Elton John.....not that he hasn't had his share of bitchy moments.

THATS ALL FOR NOW.

This is a lesson for me to let go of vanity- I don't need to be Kiera Knightly, I'm not in LA or NYC- I'm not auditioning or dressing to impress. Anxiety and silly trivial worries and nerves may fade if I sleep off with a PINT!!!! Until then, in all my nomadic imperfection.....cheerio! ;) (I'm bringin' that back, the way Justin claims sexy.)

So you're here in sunny London (I'm allowed to say that as it has been today, and we won't mention the fact that it's been raining for the last three months!).

There's not much point in me trying to list things you should do and see (300 year old quote about bored of London=bored of life, etc., etc.) but, if at any point you do want a guide / partner in crime / translator of idiom / chauffeur / provider of bail, let me know.

In the meantime, I'll return to my glass of wine, and to thoughts about how mistaken these young colonial types were in their hot-headed celebration of July 4th...!

yeah! you made it! when i went to Europe I backpacked so I could only bring my most comfortable and practical shoes (which weren't pretty). I realized that no one really cared what I looked like and had the time of my life. Hope you can relax a little and enjoy it! have a pint for me. cheers!

sure I've stayed in some crap ones, but most I have stayed in, while modest, where nice and clean and friendly.(one in Rome was so horrid, I gathered my stuff the next morning, demanded my money and found a new place within the hour.)

Oh and stray from the touristy crap some! You are sure to have a much more rounded experience.(p.s. I am dying to know whats in the main hall at the Tate Modern, always so interesting!)

I know what you mean about insecurities following you wherever you go. When I was on my honeymoon in Hawaii I was still thinking, ugh, stop eating so much, put down the mai tai, you have to wear a swimsuit later. It is hard to make that go away.

Blueey- I sent you an email did you get it??? I miss you madly. xoxox.

Nicole- I did I did!!! I wish you were here! xo

storie- yes, I'm coming back to Englnd at the end of my trip to do the countryside; stonehendge, bath, oxford, cambridge, cotswolds, etc.

each of the two- I am I am, I have to do the historical tourist stuff just because when youre in the country it's a must, but I'm also getting tips from locals on what THEY do, where they eat, hang out, etc. et.c

Oh my God! If you think you look less than beautiful, go to Asia. It was so bloody hot there I was constantly sweating, I stopped wearing make up and where I was volunteering, wreaked havoc on my face. Even though it wasn't the "sexiest" time in my life, I had an amazing time b/c I wasn't going to let silly things like that get me down. And would you believe it? I met a fantastic guy!

By the way, hostels and guesthouses, as gross as some may be they are cheap. You are not there to sleep, right? So you only need some place to shower and sleep. Plus, hostels are great places to meet other travelers.