Can I Manifest a Better Relationship with LOA?

As a follow up to my previous post about fixing broken relationships with LOA, today’s topic is all about how to manifest a better relationship with LOA, and it’s a response to a question sent in by an Awesome Reader who asks:

Should I focus all of my energy and thoughts on things that DO make me happy regardless of whether they’re related to the thing I want (e.g, I want a better relationship so I focus my thoughts and energy on tennis because it brings me tons of joy). In turn, does that make the manifestations happen because I’m happier now (a.k.a., vibing at a high frequency)? Or is more work required than that?

Should I literally focus (force) every single thought on things that feel good – and should that focus be of happy memories of the perfect relationship or take my mind off the relationship completely, and focus on something unrelated, like tennis?

There are so many different questions in this one that I’m going to break this post down into bite-sized chunks by answering each one individually. So let’s dive right in, shall we?

Does getting happy help you to manifest a better relationship?

Should I focus all of my energy and thoughts on things that DO make me happy regardless of whether they’re related to the thing I want (e.g, I want a better relationship so I focus my thoughts and energy on tennis because it brings me tons of joy).

Yes! Absolutely! One of the biggest principles behind LOA is the idea of feeling good. Whatever we are sending out into the Universe is what we tend to attract more of into our lives, so if we want to feel good, we should do things and think things that make us feel good now, and the Universe will happily continue lining up more situation and experiences for us that will be a match to us feeling good.

If you want to manifest a better relationship, the key is to figure out what the underlying reason is for that desire – do you want to be in the relationship because it will make you feel more secure, or attractive, or happier, or whatever. Figure out the why behind the thing you want (a better relationship in this case) and then focus on thoughts and on actually doing things that make you feel that way now. So if, for example, you want to manifest a better relationship because it will make you happier, then do things NOW that make you happy (like your tennis!) Because you’re already happy, you’ll manifest more things into your life to be happy about (like that new relationship).

The big thing to remember is that the feeling behind what you want has to be in your life before you can actually manifest the thing you want. In other words, you have to be happy just because you’re happy before you can manifest a better relationship that will make you happy. A relationship cannot make you happy – not in the long term — unless you’re already happy within. But if you are already happy, then that relationship will enhance and magnify that existing happiness for you.

Do I need to work hard to manifest a better relationship?

In turn, does that make the manifestations happen because I’m happier now (a.k.a., vibing at a high frequency)? Or is more work required than that?

So, we covered the first part of this above – yes, when you’re happier you’re going to manifest more things to be happier about when. And this goes for any emotion, good or bad – if you’re feeling peaceful you’ll manifest more things that make you feel peaceful, if you’re feeling angry and resentful you’ll manifest more things to feel angry and resentful about. This is why we tell people to focus on feeling good and on shifting your thoughts towards things that make you feel happy – because when that’s what you’re focused on, that’s what you’ll bring more of into your life.

As for the second part of this — anytime something becomes “work” for you, it’s not going to help you get what you want. If it feels like work, it’s probably not the best approach for you, and you definitely can’t manifest a better relationship with these principles if what you’re doing feels like work, because it means you’re trying to force something.

I go over a lot of techniques and strategies for vibe shifting on this site, but not all of those techniques will work for all individuals – anytime you come across information on my site or anyone else’s that doesn’t feel right for you, feel free to just let it go. When you start down any kind of spiritual or personal development path, it’s a very personal thing and you only need to pick up the pieces you come across that make sense for you and which help you on your own journey. If there are pieces that don’t “fit” for you, there is absolutely nothing wrong with leaving them for others who will be helped by them. For the most part, this stuff should feel natural, easy and flowing. You will struggle with new concepts from time to time, but that usually means you’re trying to force an intellectual understanding of them before you’re ready to feel the understanding. (This, by the way, is very common, so don’t feel bad when it does happen!)

Should I force myself to focus on happy thoughts?

Should I literally focus (force) every single thought on things that feel good – and should that focus be of happy memories of the perfect relationship or take my mind off the relationship completely, and focus on something unrelated, like tennis?

Again, you don’t want to be forcing anything when it comes to this stuff. Force and LOA don’t mix well, because when you are trying to force something, you’re immediately lowering your vibration, and you’re also going to bring more situations into your life that require force or that feel forced. Generally speaking, what we want is ease and flow, not force.

So, yes, thinking of happy relationship memories is a great idea, as long as these memories really do make you happy and don’t make you sad because you don’t have that anymore. I can’t stress that enough – the key is always to focus onwhat you want rather than what you don’t want. If those old memories make you sad or make you focus on the fact that you don’t have what you want right now, then don’t go there, because focusing on what you don’t want just brings more of what you don’t want into your life.

If that’s the case, then instead of reliving old memories, let them go and build something new with your imagination. And have fun with it! Think about exactly what you do want in a perfect relationship. In fact, let’s make this an exercise – get out a pen and paper right now and jot down a list of everything you want in the perfect relationship, and don’t put any limits on it. If you want long walks on the beach, then add it to the list! Someone who loves to cook and can provide you with a real challenge when you play Scrabble? Jot it down! Rainy day snuggles on the couch while watching old movies? Great! In-depth philosophical discussions about Life, the Universe and Everything? Awesome! Whatever would be the perfect relationship for you… add it to your list. Get really clear on what you want. And get excited about it! The perfect relationship is out there for you, and it will happen as soon as you allow yourself to be a match to it.

And yes, if tennis makes you happy, then by all means go ahead and think about tennis, too. It certainly won’t harm your ability to manifest a better relationship. 🙂