Monday, November 8, 2010

Have you ever met someone for the first time and knew you were in the presence of someone and something special? Well…when you do, it’s a pretty powerful moment.I met a bride for my show, “My Fair Wedding” this past week and she took my breath away.Her strength, positive outlook on life, and her passion for living in the moment is extremely powerful.There was a moment when looking at her that I began to cry, because she was radiant with that special something, that special feeling, the energy that is powerful.Kimberly was diagnosed at a young age with stage three breast cancer, has undergone a double mastectomy, and she elected to have her ovaries removed as she carried the cancer gene, and didn’t want to pass it on to her children. My bride is truly remarkable.I surprised her on my show with her Mom and Grandmother (also a breast cancer survivor) for a moment that was truly needed for her for her wedding.The experience of being with three generations of women that are connected to each other was contagious.The love they have for each other is indescribably powerful and I was honored to be in their presences, as their connection was infectious. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if more of us shared with others the energy of Kimberly? It would be amazing if the only thing in life that was contagious was positive energy and love!

My heart is sad for children that have to deal with being picked on, made fun of, laughed at and bullied to where they feel they have to take their lives. I was a child of bullying in school and for me, as so many kids, we did the best to survive throughout our years in school. No child should always have to be in survivor mode! It is up to the adults to be aware of this, teach our children how to respect others, and care for them. I am grateful that I had the strength to hold on and crawl through these muddy and uncomfortable years where it seemed like everything was moving in slow motion.I went to school officials, guidance counselors, and even my own teachers, but sadly, nothing was done…SHAME on them! Children need the support, protection, and guidance of adults.It is our role to teach, respect and show acceptance with compassion to everyone and never judge anyone for being anything other then perfect.All children are beautiful and perfect in my eyes….all children should be loved, and all children should be protected.Parents, I beg of you to listen, to not turn away if you see something or hear something and do not assume everything will be OK because many times it is not.When a child is bullied, it is like creating a scar in their heart, soul, and mind that is very hard to fully heal. Now I am picking on the adults reading this. I am urging adults to step it up and take responsibility….please! Treat our children withgrace, love, and kindness so they in turn will do the same to one another. There’s a phrase I think about everyday “In loving kindness” – I think it says it all.

This is sometimes for the good and perhaps sometimes not!I have recently come to realize how thankful I am to be fortunate enough to have been graced with the qualities of both my parents.My Dad; a man filled with much ambition.He is a person that works so hard and is so determined to make everyone happy. My Dad is the one that taught me at a young age to never say “NO”, to never accept this answer, and to persevere until you get to wherever you need to be in life that makes you happy. His determination in life has granted me the strength to always push forward.My Mom; a woman filled with compassion, heart and passion.When in her presence, you know you are surrounded by love, and she is someone that worries about everyone and only sees the positive in all and in life.This perfect combination of Mom and Dad has been a gift that I am lucky to have received.Thank you... Jo Ann and Joe for guiding me, teaching me and for sharing you with me, and for also allowing me to become the person I am today. We all need to learn how to acquire the best of the people we surround ourselves with and lose the negative qualities or energies that often surround us all too.We all have the ability to be the best we can be and we all have the ability to be better people…..but we ALSO have to want that!! So Mom and Dad…… thank you for simply being YOU!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

As I travel around the country and meet so many wonderful people, I listen and hear all the things they have to share with me about my show, "My Fair Wedding". I love to listen and speak to my fans about the stories they have to share with me regarding the show. Last night at one of my speaking appearances, I met a grandmother with her daughter and her her granddaughter, who collectively wanted to thank me for bridging them together. They look forward to sitting together for an hour to watch me and my show. The little one that is nine years old loves to dream of her future wedding and talks of becoming a wedding planner as well some day. Her Mom loves to see the outcome of each bride on the show and loves seeing the reactions on my face with some of the things I endure. The Grandmother loves the show and all, but most of all, loves being able to be with her girls to sit and have quality time together.

I am honored to be able to provide moments that bring generations together, to stop, sit and watch the show. I adore the fact that you will sit down and spend an hour with me, laughing and crying, right beside me on my journey. Having you experience the changes these girls endure in their lives during the entire process leading up to their wedding day, and seeing what I see as I make genuine lasting relationships with these women, makes me so very happy to share. Please know, I wish I were there with you, but know in my heart I am there because providing you these moments on TV means I am with in in a sense. I used to love going to my Nana and Pop Pops every Wednesday at 7pm and have chicken cutlets and it would be just us. All we would do is talk, catch up and laugh and I have never been so content. These are those moments I am talking about. Cherish them, hold them dear to your heart, and create them. Learning and listening from all of you each day is a blessing so continue to share, and continue to bridge that generational gap even if it's for that one hour.

Everyone run! Yes! Don't walk, or even think about it, just run! I want everyone to get the CD for Florence and The Machine, "Lungs" and listen to track one, entitled, "Dog Days are Over" Then when it's over, listen to it again! I fell in love with them and this song when watching the VMA's a few weeks ago.

Every day I begin my day listening to this song. It truly makes your heart smile which is a fabulous way to begin your day. I recently added to my start of each work day on set a new daily ritual before filming my show My Fair Wedding. No matter where we are when I arrive I crank up the volume and play the song. I insist that everyone stop whatever it is they are doing, and listen; no work, no questions, just listen. The song is just over four minutes. Life can hold for four minutes right? So jump up and down, dance, take your scarf and fly it through the air and let loose and let go.

The first few times I began this new addition to filming I will admit, the crew looked at me as if I were nuts. Well between you and me, I am a bit nutty, but I love to have fun. As I continue to do it each day, more and more of the crew have joined in. Some still watch, some take video and pictures, but what it creates at the beginning of each day on set is happiness which is the first word in the lyrics of the song. I have sent the song to loved ones that are going through challenging times right now and asked them to stop, hold hands, and listen together. If you are alone and missing someone listen to this amazing song and if you just want to feel wonderful and take the day with control and confidence, listen to this music and i promise you happiness will surround you. Because the dog days are over, and you better run...

Living in the moment... I have come to learn something recently that has allowed me to truly have a new appreciation to enjoying life. We seem to all love to look forward to special occasions...holidays...birthdays...weddings and vacations, giving us something to work harder for, or have something on our calendars we cant wait for. These moments in our lives are important and special, but what I have come to learn is that time flies by so much faster when we rush away our lives.

With all the travel I do, I used to look forward to it all being over. I would have anxiety just knowing I had another trip to take and another job to do. For me, it was another moment I would not be home and it would overwhelm me so much that I would forget to live in this state of being called, "the moment". RecentlyI had a grueling travel schedule that I wasn't looking forward to at all. Six cities in six days placing me on six planes. It's exhausting just to write and reread. I then learned an important lesson that I will never forget. Life is extremely precious and so very special, that we must learn to appreciate the moment we are in, regardless of the situation. Happiness is not derived from what you are doing, where you are going, or who you are with, but it is a state of mind, that only you can have inside of you and your heart. Grasping the moment each day is what it is all about, and I have learned to embrace each moment, each day, and now find time for the simple things in life, no matter where I am.

It could be the sunshine that begins our day, the phone call from a loved one that brightens up our mood, or just a walk alone in the park. A stranger that we randomly meet, we can somehow laugh with and learn something new about them. Our lives are all so complicated, busy, and so stressful but trust me; if each of us can find the power to be in control of living in the moment and find those things that make us happy, our lives will suddenly become rich and colorful, and not simply pass by. Live in the moment and it will allow you to live in your life!

Friday, September 10, 2010

When you know someone is about to celebrate a milestone birthday what do you do? I know for me I love to celebrate life in general and when MY birthday rolls around I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE being with my family and special friends.For my 40th …WOW… Did I celebrate my birthday? That’s for another time to share... Well, my Mom is about to turn 70 and we threw her a surprise 60th Birthday that was special for her, for us, and for her friends.So I asked my Mom what she would like to do for her 70th and she immediately responded saying she didn’t want to have a big party!She is looking forward to having a special weekend with her three girlfriends who are all turning 70 this year.These three women have grown up together from kindergarten.It’s amazing!They have been in each others weddings, godmothers to each others children and see each other all the time; the bond they share is incredible!But what do I do for my Mom’s Birthday?Do I have a big birthday party for her? Do I take my Mom somewhere special?I have been thinking non stop of what to do and ask myself, do I listen to the honoree when they tell you they don’t want a birthday party?So I am in a dilemma for sure.I need to figure out how to not make her day go unnoticed and how to make her feel very special.She is off this week to NYC to have a full beauty make over with her girlfriend Molly.I wanted my Mom to feel like a queen for a day. A friend of mine, Eve Pearl, is going to take care of these two ladies in style.Eve is a five time Emmy Award winning make up artist to the celebrities, and she is going to make my mom feel like a celebrity too.This is my gift to my Mom for this past Mother’s Day.So you see, I like to make celebrations in life big and special.As I write this I know I need to do something truly special for this big Birthday.I have to get thinking and fast because it is a few months away.I feel we all have to find the time to make our loved ones feel important and never let moments in life go unnoticed, which is why we all need to…

I just returned from one of my favorite places….Santa Fe, New Mexico.Ryan and I have been to this serene place several times and each time we come back we always leave feeling rejuvenated, relaxed and spiritually connected to not only to ourselves and each other, but to life in general.Santa Fe is a quaint town about one hour north of Albuquerque and as soon as you arrive you feel the positive energy that Santa Fe has to offer.I have been to Santa Fe with Ryan many times. We went for a summer years ago, we traveled for my big birthday where we took a hot air balloon ride down the Rio Grande as well as many other trips.Each time we simply love to walk, meet people, have great food, and see amazing art.The sunsets are by far some of the most beautiful paintings of color I have seen in the sky.The stars in the evening will take your breath away.

I was speaking to a local resident this last visit and I was sharing with him my love affair that we have for this special place.He said to me…Santa Fe is like Tofu, it becomes the flavor you want it to be.Santa Fe is just the same… you make your experience in Santa Fe what you want it to be.I found this saying so profound.Isn’t this what we are supposed to do with our lives every day?We are in control of what we want to experience, we are the ones that can flavor of own lives each day and we are the ones that can truly allow ourselves to enjoy life.I have to be honest I don’t like Tofu at all but I can respect the reference that he made.So here is to all of us sprinkling some spice, some sugar, or some herbs to our daily life so we can enjoy the flavors we all so want to experience.

I had drinks last night with one of my brides from my show and it was really fantastic. I do stay in touch with my brides via emails and texts, but it’s been hard due to my schedule to connect one on one in person. I had the chance to see Nicole (Poker Bride) from season three. We laughed and talked for quite a while. I connected to Nicole the moment I walked through her door filming my show. Seeing her for drinks in NYC for the first time since the wedding reminded me why I adored her so much. I sat back and listened to all that is happening in her life. I had presented to Nicole the night of her wedding a fantastic honeymoon to Las Vegas at the Wynn Resort. I couldn't wait to ask all the questions and hear all about the experience they had together in Vegas. I sat there like a little kid as she told her story. I listened to every word, each description as she painted the picture of her time in Las Vegas. From the limo that picked her up to the suite she stayed in at the Encore at Wynn, to the wonderful show Le Reve, and the dinner they had together. This was a first for me.....I get to see what the wedding does for my Bride and Groom and their guests at the wedding...but after the cameras are down, I don't get to hear about the wedding memory in perspective of my girls, and what these experiences mean to them. For Nicole she met her Dad, she went on a once in a lifetime trip, and she had the time of her life that she says she will never forget. Nicole also said she cried tears of joy for two weeks after the wedding was over because she couldn't believe it all happened to her.

How lucky am I? Very lucky, because I get to meet these wonderful girls and not just give them dream weddings but give them life experiences that touch them forever. I am lucky because they change my life forever. Nicole was Lucky in Love and I am Lucky in Life!

Thursday, September 9, 2010

My very own blog on my very own web site....it’s exciting! Believe it or not the little things in life still get me excited, including this blog. My team has been so busy working hard on the redesign of my web site and an important element to include for me in the new site was my blog. I want this blog to be more personal to my readers and for me. I thought the David Tutera Blog could be more of a look into my life, my thoughts and my experiences. I spend so much time traveling and I have the opportunity to meet so many wonderful people. Relationships are so important to me that I cherish each one I make. A friend of mine taught me years ago that people come into our lives either for a season, a reason or a lifetime. This is so true...but what is more important is that we need to keep ourselves always open to new experiences which, in turn, will allow us to develop new relationships to learn from.

Every bride, every vendor, each new friend I meet enters my life to teach me something. If we are open to these life experiences, we will always continue to grow as people. I hope my new blog will allow for me to share my life's experiences and help me grow by sharing them with you and allow for all of my readers to learn a little something new about me. I have a saying on my computers both at home and at work that says....Life is a gift!

May each day be filled with gifts we can open and share with each other. So here is to my first blog on my web site and here is to...celebrating life in style!