I never would have guessed by his eloquent speeches, but in private, President Obama sounds a lot like ESPN's Stuart Scott... with all the 'Off da hizzy' and 'What's good baby' stuff. Frankly, I just wish the meeting had been more productive. I could barely understand that guy. I've never been a fan of the younger generation's 'Jive Talkin'.

The President gave me a humanitarian award for throwing the ball directly to Steelers linebacker James Harrison in Super Bowl XLIII. He said, 'Good lookin-out for the brothers, Kurt!' I'm a regular-old white guy, so I'm not sure what he's talking about.

The first thing I learned about President Obama? Well uhm... this is embarrassing, but you know how those rap songs use the N-word a lot? Long story short, President Obama is not a fan of the N-word. I just wish someone had told me beforehand... and I'm really sorry.