Michael Deacon is the Telegraph's Parliamentary Sketchwriter. He also writes regularly about TV.

Why are Labour still complaining about Stephen Hester's bonus?

I don't know why, but I'd somehow got it into my head that, several days ago, Stephen Hester agreed to waive his RBS bonus. But he can't have done. Because if he had, Labour MPs would have been satisfied with this outcome, and stopped asking about it.

And yet today, in the Commons, Ian Murray – the Labour MP for Edinburgh South – asked Vince Cable the following question.

"Why did the Government wave through the bonus for the RBS chief executive before the Bank of England had published the annual Project Merlin lending figures?"

The Business Secretary gave the Government's usual answer, i.e., Hester was on a contract drawn up by Labour. He was too polite to add, for example, "Why are you complaining about the award of a bonus that the man won't actually receive? What do you want me to do? Strip him of a bonus he hasn't got? Strip him of a knighthood he hasn't got? Strip him of his cycling proficiency certificate and his 50 metre swimming badge?"