And Now Let’s Take A Moment To Respect Jennifer Love Hewitt As An Actress

I need to come clean with you guys. This isn’t a post about Jennifer Love Hewitt’s acting, it’s about her breasts. I know that seems out of place for a site like this, but I just couldn’t look at myself in the mirror if I wasn’t being honest with you. I don’t know why I even tried to fool you. You know me too well. *taps you on the chin with fist*

I just wanna lay on top of her and smoosh her. Jam her. Crush her. let my body take out all the air in her body. I just wanna squish her. Thrust my pelvic bone down, and fill her. Oh my god…I want her to have my anchor baby, and sneak back to the border. I want my tongue to flambé her inner thighs. I want to have immaculate conception on her thigh. Oh…where was I?