The Tribeca Film Festival and American Express have launched a contest in which people upload their best one minute pitch for a movie, and the winner’s idea will actually go into production. Neat. That is, of course, how all the best movies are made, including Citizen Coin, Godfellers, and The Battle of Shaker Heights. Anyhow, a popular website FOR MEN ONLY, Asylum.com, took a moment from its usual schedule of posting lists of “The 100 Smallest Bikinis Draped Over Beer Cans,” or whatever, to find and compile what they considered to be the “worst” entries in the My Movie PItch contest, and you have to hand it to them, they did a REALLY good job. The pitches that they found are very bad pitches! Some of them are basically unwatchable! I don’t mean the theoretical movie idea sounds unwatchable, I mean the one minute video of a person describing their idea is unwatchable, forget the movie.

However, one of these pitches towers above the rest. And so I call upon the “agents” of Videogum Everywhere to prepare yourselves for another mission. This one is easy: simply watch the young man’s pitch after the jump for a terrifying horror movie called Gesundheit, and at the end of the video you will be prompted to vote for him. Vote for him. Mission accomplished.

People are running the grocery stores, the government is trying to figure out what’s going on, and this time, it’s kind of biological. Seriously, let’s please get Gesundheit made into a real movie. This is our big shot! Fuck you, Ari Gold! (Thanks for the tip, Jane.)