Dealine Met; Partay Time

Sorry for the absence, folks. I’ve been involved in a heavy deadline at work and just a few minutes ago my group finished and hit our goal. Yee-haw. I’m hoping that we get to go home early so I can drink a beer and play Tiger Woods PGA Tour Golf 2004 on XBOX. That game f’ing rules. Me and GMX have been trading wins in 1-on-1 mode since we got it. I created an awesome golfer who looks like I would if I had enormous shoulders and a 15 inch waist. He is tha bomb, if I may be so bold. GMX’s golfer is a thugged out chinese man with a fu manchu moustache and blond cornrows. He is awesome as well. When GMX makes a birdie or eagle, his thugg does the Running Man or starts shimmying & shaking with such vigor you’d think he was going to pop his load right there on the 14th hole of Pebble Beach. All in all: A Good Game(tm). I’ll probably do a review of it once I get a bit further and have more of an opinion of the Season Tour mode.

So for the last week or so I’ve just slogged through work trying to get to the goal we had set on automating scripts and when I was done I would go home and sit, staring glassy-eyed at either the TV or video games. Now I’m invigorated, though. I’m hyped. I saying this: party at Thugg Mansion this weekend, bitches! The question goes out to the roommates, of who I will of course take counsel from in deciding whether to purchase a quarter-barrel, set up that quarter-barrel in our garage, and subsequently serve beer our of that quarter-barrel to whichever of our friends show up at the appointed time. What do you guys think?

Wirkuswhazz’s personal retelling of the Wedding Story bellgirl told on Tuesday was slightly more funny. He was honestly, actually, and mightily enraged by that retarded fellow and his penchant for not only dancing, but forcing others to dance for his amusement. By the end of the evening Kevin (the 30% Retarded Fellow) was demanding to know what Jessi(e?) saw in Wirkuswhazz. Indeed, the ability to shimmy & shake is not only a prized ability on the golf course, but in the mating rituals of homo sapiens as well. What kind of girl would date a man with no rhythm? Surely not Erin Woinowski (now Moneypenny); I’m a fucking Dance Master. My feet and body move with a fluidity normally reserved for fluids, particularly fluids with Spanish Fly dumped in them. I demanded a picture of Kevin and Wirkuswhazz, arms around each other Marcus & McTeague-style. I heard rumors that Bellgirl (or as she’s apparently known on the dance floor: The Vagg Scientist) possesses pictures of this or something like it. Please, honey, get thos epictures to me so I can put them up on the World Wide Web and everyone can have a bit of fun. Please?

Before I hang up, I’d like to plug an adverstisement. This spot has been paid for by our neighborhood all-around rascally rapscallion cla:

Please sign up for Beat The Streak. Go to mlb.com and click on Fantasy->Basic Leagues->Beat The Streak. Do Join a League and type in League Name: ‘beatthestreak’, Password: ‘beatthestreak’. Let’s do it, whazzmaster. See if anyone can beat Timmah’s amazing streak of ___ from last season! My mom won the Golden Ticket again this year! Huzzah for Minneapolis!

My golfer is not a chinese man. He is a white man, with blonde cornrows, and a black fu man chu. He eyes are slanty like that of an asian man due to the excessive amount of weed he smokes to keep his plati caps clean.