Picking up the pieces…

Hey there.

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? You may think I’ve just been lazy or procrastinating but honestly I wish that was the reason for my lack of posts.

This is extremely difficult to write, but since October 2014, my dad has been in hospital. The causes were unexplainable for so long and week after week saw me travelling a similar and painful route back and forth the Cardiff University hospital. It’s been a hell of a year and although there’s been some good times in 2015, the 90% has been pure hell for my family and I. I won’t go into details as this is not a place to discuss such a personal issue.

Sunday 13th September saw my dad passing away peacefully. A late diagnosis last month meant there was nothing more that could be done for him and it was the most painful thing for me to ever experience. From the moment I found out right up until the funeral felt like a slow motion car crash but also flew by rather quickly. How can you sum up the way you feel about losing a parent? Death is a given in life, that’s probably the only thing we can only be sure of. But so soon? I’m still having trouble making sense of it all.

So, that’s my reason from my time away from blogging. I missed it so much, but to concentrate on this with the most difficult and exhausting year I’ve ever faced happening, it was just something I had to leave out.

Life outside of the living hell hasn’t been all too bad. I saw my favourite bands in concert, have been writing for Maximum Pop! for over a year, got my first tattoo, turned 20 and going to London again this week to see One Direction for the last time before their break. I can’t keep dwelling in the pain and mourning of my father. Of course, I’m still grieving and will be for some time. But one thing my dad wanted was for myself as well as my brother and sister to go out and live our lives, achieve our dreams and do what we want to do. The last thing my dad and I did together before he was first taken ill was go to London for my first ever world première. It was such an amazing day and one I’ll never forget.

I hope I can make my dad proud of me and even though he made sure I knew he was, I still want to be able to go on and do all what I can to maintain the reason for his pride.

I will slowly but surely be back to blogging. Time’s a healer and right now it’s what I need.

Thank you for all the support on my blog in the past and I hope I can continue writing content of interest to you in the near future.