The facts

Published: Sunday, April 7, 2013 at 10:49 a.m.

Last Modified: Sunday, April 7, 2013 at 10:49 a.m.

Joseph Haley of Hendersonville says two recent correspondents, both advocating gun ownership for citizens to defend against government intrusion, have seemingly overlooked some important facts. “One points to the Afghan mujahedeen as successful against Russia, omitting that they were armed (by us) with missiles that shot down Russian helicopters,” Mr. Haley points out. “The gallant French partisans did well until facing the German army at Vercors Plateau in 1944. They lost 1,000 men. Tanks trump Glocks always. The second correspondent warns us not to emulate 1930s German socialism, which caused horrific inflation. Alas, that occurred in 1923 during the Weimar Republic, a decade pre-Hitler. Reading some history might help.”

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‘I ROLLED MY EYES’: Richard Pope of Hendersonville says he watched a documentary about student underground resistance groups during Adolf Hitler’s reign of terror during World War II and thought there’s no need to worry about American youths forming such groups. “The documentary’s co-producer said post-9/11 America is a Nazi police state and that the youths of America must join student underground resistance groups and rise up and overthrow the Nazi police state and restore liberty, justice and the American way. I rolled my eyes,” says Mr. Pope. “America’s youths are too busy social networking to overthrow anybody. How can you engage in an armed revolutionary struggle with a cellphone glued to your ear? This generation will go down in history as the generation that lost America.”

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WHO WANTS TO GO?: Your Mountains to Molehills columnist will return to New England and Canada next fall for more round-the-clock excitement with our readers, and anyone putting off signing up should speak up soon. Only four spots remain available. We have limited space available on Royal Caribbean’s Grandeur of the Seas, which will depart from Baltimore, Md., on Oct. 17 for an eight-day cruise that will take us to Halifax and St. John in Canada; Portland, Maine (ooh, more lobstah!); and Maine’s Bar Harbor, a famous colony loved by the Rockefellers ... this columnist, too! Want to go? You can pick up a reservation form and itinerary either at the Times-News on Four Seasons Boulevard or by calling our travel agent at 336-794-3233. You can reserve space with a deposit!

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‘PAIN IN MY SIDE’: The Sunday school students were being taught how God created everything, including humans. Little Billy, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when the teacher told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam’s ribs. Later in the week, his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and asked, “Billy, what is the matter?” Little Billy groaned and responded, “I have a pain in my side. I think I’m going to have a wife.”

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LAST BUT NOT LEAST: Mark your calendars for the second annual Spring-Go Festival at Chimney Rock Village on May 18. The fun will start at 7:30 a.m. and continue until 4 p.m., and best of all there is no admission charge. The festival will start with a pancake breakfast at the Fire House from 7:30 to 9:30 a.m. The cost is $7.50, and the menu includes pancakes with a selection of tasty toppings, sausage, scrambled eggs, coffee and juice — yumyum! The Olde Timey Mountain Parade will start at 10 a.m. You’ll find arts and crafts booths at the Gathering Place from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. And who could pass up a chance to win $1,250 in the Pie Bingo event. Where will that darn cow go? A $25 ticket gets you a chance to win the money, but the cow has to drop the largest amount of “pie” on your square. You can get tickets at either Medina’s Café or Coffee on the Rocks. Live music and entertainment, including cloggers, will be provided all afternoon.

<p>Joseph Haley of Hendersonville says two recent correspondents, both advocating gun ownership for citizens to defend against government intrusion, have seemingly overlooked some important facts. “One points to the Afghan mujahedeen as successful against Russia, omitting that they were armed (by us) with missiles that shot down Russian helicopters,” Mr. Haley points out. “The gallant French partisans did well until facing the German army at Vercors Plateau in 1944. They lost 1,000 men. Tanks trump Glocks always. The second correspondent warns us not to emulate 1930s German socialism, which caused horrific inflation. Alas, that occurred in 1923 during the Weimar Republic, a decade pre-Hitler. Reading some history might help.” </p><p>u </p><p>'I ROLLED MY EYES': Richard Pope of Hendersonville says he watched a documentary about student underground resistance groups during Adolf Hitler's reign of terror during World War II and thought there's no need to worry about American youths forming such groups. “The documentary's co-producer said post-9/11 America is a Nazi police state and that the youths of America must join student underground resistance groups and rise up and overthrow the Nazi police state and restore liberty, justice and the American way. I rolled my eyes,” says Mr. Pope. “America's youths are too busy social networking to overthrow anybody. How can you engage in an armed revolutionary struggle with a cellphone glued to your ear? This generation will go down in history as the generation that lost America.” </p><p>u </p><p>WHO WANTS TO GO?: Your Mountains to Molehills columnist will return to New England and Canada next fall for more round-the-clock excitement with our readers, and anyone putting off signing up should speak up soon. Only four spots remain available. We have limited space available on Royal Caribbean's Grandeur of the Seas, which will depart from Baltimore, Md., on Oct. 17 for an eight-day cruise that will take us to Halifax and St. John in Canada; Portland, Maine (ooh, more lobstah!); and Maine's Bar Harbor, a famous colony loved by the Rockefellers ... this columnist, too! Want to go? You can pick up a reservation form and itinerary either at the Times-News on Four Seasons Boulevard or by calling our travel agent at 336-794-3233. You can reserve space with a deposit! </p><p>u </p><p>'PAIN IN MY SIDE': The Sunday school students were being taught how God created everything, including humans. Little Billy, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when the teacher told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week, his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and asked, “Billy, what is the matter?” Little Billy groaned and responded, “I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife.” </p><p>u </p><p>LAST BUT NOT LEAST: Mark your calendars for the second annual Spring-Go Festival at Chimney Rock Village on May 18. The fun will start at 7:30 a.m. and continue until 4 p.m., and best of all there is no admission charge. The festival will start with a pancake breakfast at the Fire House from 7:30 to 9:30 a.m. The cost is $7.50, and the menu includes pancakes with a selection of tasty toppings, sausage, scrambled eggs, coffee and juice — yumyum! The Olde Timey Mountain Parade will start at 10 a.m. You'll find arts and crafts booths at the Gathering Place from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. And who could pass up a chance to win $1,250 in the Pie Bingo event. Where will that darn cow go? A $25 ticket gets you a chance to win the money, but the cow has to drop the largest amount of “pie” on your square. You can get tickets at either Medina's Café or Coffee on the Rocks. Live music and entertainment, including cloggers, will be provided all afternoon. </p><p>Reach Lou Parris at 828-694-7836 or molehills@blueridgenow.com.</p>