There was a guy in the business a few years ago named Dave Pounder. He was an actor, producer, someone who interacted with a lot of people and made somewhat of a name for himself. He now lives in Florida. What’s interesting about this guy is he is running for a seat on the Palm Beach County District 3 school board.

Yes, this guy Dave Pounder, who worked in the adult business from 2003 to 2008 is running for a seat on the school board. No bullshit. We’re not talking about somebody who worked in the business 25 years ago. We’re not talking about somebody who goes, “I’m 58 years old. When I was 21, I did a couple of porn scenes. It was something I did when I was young and foolish, one of those youthful indiscretions, but I’ve been away from that life for many years and I would like the opportunity to run for the school board.” We’re not talking about that.

We’re talking about a guy who from 2003 to 2008 worked steady in the porn business. OK? Worked steady. Now he’s not only running for the school board, but has a tutor company. I shit you not. He has a tutor company called the Happy/Fun Math Tutor Company. The Happy/Fun Math Tutor Company.

Again, we’re not talking about someone who worked in porn back in the 70’s. We’re not talking about Harry Reems. A guy who worked in porn back when it was chic and he hung out with Warren Beatty and Jack Nicholson and quit the business and 30 years later he’s a real estate agent. Or a guy who works at a high school and somebody recognizes him from porn and everybody goes, “C’mon. That was 30 years ago. He was 21, he’s in his 50’s now. Give him a break.”

This guy Dave Pounder was doing porn six years ago. Six years ago, OK? And it wasn’t a brief career. He wasn’t like a girl who does a couple of scenes and hopes nobody finds out and when they do, she says she regrets it and just wants to move on with her life. Dave Pounder did porn as recently as 2008 during the end of the boom period. He started in 2003. In 2003 I was still making big money in porn. This is a guy who was working during the final stages of the porn boom.

The story states that he has two doctorates. I gotta imagine they are for some kind of math education. Dave Pounder has a tutor company that he started in 2010. So two years after he was fucking girls in their assholes for a living, he opens a company called Happy/Fun Math Tutor Company. He posted huge banners at high schools to promote it. So now the porn guy is going to high schools and tacking up signs and saying, “Come on down to Dave Pounder’s house for some Happy/Fun math, baby!”

So the school district told him to take the fucking signs down. They told him, “Hey bro. We’re not too hip on you plastering signs inviting kids to your tutoring business when you’re only two years removed from assfucking young girls on camera.” Dave Pounder got upset and decided to sue the Palm Beach County school district. The case is going to trial in November.

The school district said they didn’t feel comfortable with him catering to school kids and Dave Pounder said, “Why? I did a documentary and spoke out against porn. I spoke at a Cal/OSHA meeting saying porn should be using condoms. I’m a respectable member of the community. I know it’s only been two years since I stuck my dick in a girl’s asshole on camera, but hey, I’ve got the Happy/Fun Math Tutor Company now!”

So now that Dave Pounder is so outraged, he is gonna run for the Palm Beach County School Board District 3. Do you want to know what his platform is? Equality, secular values and sex education. Sex education.

Am I in the Land of Oz here?

A guy who only two years earlier was plugging young girls up the poopchute, a guy who worked for 5 fucking years in the porn biz and was intricately involved in all aspects of it. This guy is running for the school board. He’s running on a platform of equality, secular values and sex education. Porn guy Dave Pounder is gonna tutor all the kids of Palm Beach County on sex education. Sounds logical from a guy who fucked hundreds of porn chicks.

You can’t make this shit up. This is legit. This isn’t Rob Black running for Mayor of Los Angeles. This isn’t Mary Carey running for Governor of California. This is a guy who actually has a company called Happy/Fun Math Tutor Company. He went to high schools and put up his ads. “You wanna have some fun? You wanna be happy? I’m gonna teach you about math. And sex education.” This is the guy. Now he’s running for the school board.

I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I asked Katie to look at the article to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating. She said, “Yep. It’s real.” A guy who worked for five years in the porn biz running for the school board and wanting to teach kids about sex. Dave Pounder, are you insane?

This is why the adult business is fucked up. This is why it gets the press it does. Because guys like Dave Pounder go around putting up banners at high schools and enticing children to come to his house so he can teach them about secular values and sex education. And math. He says:

“This is my penis. It’s six inches. If I put it in your ass half way, how many inches are left?”

This really is disturbing. It goes without saying that I hope this guy loses his school board bid and his lawsuit. I hope the people of Palm Beach County run this piece of shit out of their town. This type of disgusting shit is why people associate our business with pedophilia.