Finally decided to leave MySpace behind once and for all? You girlfriend's friend's band is very sad to see you go. But not nearly as sad as MySpace itself, which makes leaving almost as unbearable as, well, staying.

A reader encountered this terrifically unwieldy instruction list of how to shuffle off this MySpace coil just yesterday. They don't make it easy! Especially since however annoying the deactivation process is, that last line, that baleful look back in the rearview—that's almost enough to send me running back into MySpace's arms. If I'd ever been there in the first place. [Thanks, Eugene!]