Magical Items

Magical items are items with special bonuses and names displayed in green. The game picks one or two magical properties randomly, then applies them to the given item, along with their corresponding name components. Magical properties may be bonuses to stats, resistances, damage, and even curses (displayed in red).

Bonus effects are in blue and add certain bonuses to the item. Defense or weapon damage that has been buffed by a magical effect also appears in blue as opposed to the normal white. However, durability appears as normal white, with or without buffs or curses applied.
Elemental damage effects have yet to be recorded (decompiling the code doesn't yield the exact numbers.)

Prefix ([Insert Prefix]…)

Suffix (…[Insert Suffix])

Effect

Turtle Shell…

…of the Turtle

+150% Defense, +50% Durability, -10% Movement Speed

Tough…

…of Safety

+10% Defense

Stout…

…of Stability

+15% Defense

Sturdy…

…of the Armadillo

+20% Defense

Reinforced…

…of Ardor

+30% Defense

Bolstered…

…of Protection

+40% Defense

Constant…

…of Warding

+50% Defense

Steadfast…

…of Assurance

+60% Defense

Valiant…

…of Perseverance

+70% Defense

Impenetrable…

…of Refuge

+80% Defense

Unfailing…

…of Victory

+90% Defense

Hell-Forged…

…of the Champion

+100% Defense

Shuckle-Shell…

…of the Protector

+110% Defense

Protector’s…

…of Invulnerability

+125% Defense

Sooty…

…of Ash

+10% Fire Resist

Flame-Retardant…

…of Soot

+15% Fire Resist

Unburning…

…of Aerosol

+20% Fire Resist

Scarlet…

…of Scarlet

+25% Fire Resist

Sandy…

….of Sand

+30% Fire Resist

Crimson…

…of Extinguishing

+40% Fire Resist

Sanguine…

…of Nitrogen

+50% Fire Resist

Deoxidized…

…of Fluorine

+60% Fire Resist

Incombustible…

…of Poor Kindling Materials

+70% Fire Resist

Unmelting…

…of Dwarvish Craft

+80% Fire Resist

Smokey the Bear’s…

…of Hydrogen

+90% Fire Resist

Coolant Injecting…

…, Hydrogen Pumps Included

+100% Fire Resist

Eskimo’s…

…of Warmth

+10% Ice Resist

Fuzzy…

…of Defrost

+15% Ice Resist

Pale…

…of the Walrus

+20% Ice Resist

Nordic…

…of Insulation

+25% Ice Resist

Husky…

…of the Polar Bear

+30% Ice Resist

Insulated…

…of the Viking

+40% Ice Resist

Unfreezing…

…of Antifreeze

+50% Ice Resist

Extremely Fuzzy…

…of the Thermos

+60% Ice Resist

Bear Gryll’s…

…of the Yeti

+70% Ice Resist

Air Conditioned…

…of Defrostination

+80% Ice Resist

Vacuum-Sealed…

…of the Whale

+90% Ice Resist

Grandma’s Custom-Knit…

…of the WHHHAAAAAAaaaale

+100% Ice Resist

Scout’s…

…of Slightly More Damage

+1 Damage

Squire’s…

…of Boldness

+2 Damage

Warrior’s…

…of Courage

+3 Damage

Knight’s…

…of Bravery

+4 Damage

Lieutenant’s…

…of Virtue

+5 Damage

Captain’s…

…of Fearlessness

+6 Damage

General’s…

…of Valor

+7 Damage

Warlord’s…

…of Justice

+8 Damage

King’s…

…of Determination

+9 Damage

Angel’s…

…of Truth

+10 Damage

Archangel’s…

…of Destiny

+11 Damage

Hero’s…

…of Legend

+12 Damage

Pointy…

…of Whacking

+10% Damage

Sharpened…

…of Spanking

+15% Damage

Fancy…

…of Slaying

+20% Damage

Painful…

…of Squashing

+25% Damage

Ardent…

…of Maiming

+30% Damage

Embiggened…

…of Disembowelment

+35% Damage

Bloody…

…of Mangling

+40% Damage

Menacing…

…of Vanquishing

+45% Damage

Brutal…

…of Exploding Gore

+50% Damage

Monstrous…

…of Massacre

+60% Damage

Badass…

…of Infanticide

+70% Damage

Legendary…

…That’ll Kill You Twenty Times Before You Hit the Ground

+80% Damage

Balanced…

…of the Lamest Bonus in the Game

+1 Minimum Damage

Improved…

…of Quality

+2 Minimum Damage

Precise…

…of Precision

+3 Minimum Damage

Efficient…

…of Worth

+4 Minimum Damage

Reliable…

…of Consistency

+5 Minimum Damage

Consistent…

…of Certainty

+6 Minimum Damage

Well-Designed…

…of Results

+7 Minimum Damage

Thoroughly Engineered…

…of Solid Engineering

+8 Minimum Damage

Gnomish…

…of Gnomish Design

+9 Minimum Damage

Buffed…

…of Bonified Metrics

+10 Minimum Damage

Embued…

…of Darn Consistent Results

+11 Minimum Damage

Finite…

…of the Surgeon

+12 Minimum Damage

Unpredictable…

…of the Hissy Fit

+1 Maximum Damage

Crazy…

…of the Temper Tantrum

+2 Maximum Damage

Sassy…

…of Anger

+3 Maximum Damage

Spunky…

…of Power

+4 Maximum Damage

Capricious…

…of Rage

+5 Maximum Damage

Wild…

…of Ire

+6 Maximum Damage

Reckless…

…of Goblin Craftsmanship

+7 Maximum Damage

Dangerous…

…of Beserking

+8 Maximum Damage

Orcish…

…of Wrath

+9 Maximum Damage

Turbulent…

…of Destruction

+10 Maximum Damage

Chaotic…

…of Obliteration

+11 Maximum Damage

Cheesed Off…

…of Annihilation

+12 Maximum Damage

Sweaty…

…of Toasting

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Freshly Baked…

…of Thawing

Add 2-3 Fire Damage

Sooty…

…of Ash

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Crackling…

…of Ember

Add 4-6 Fire Damage

Burning…

…of Frying

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Scorching…

…of Flame

Add 5-8 Fire Damage

Sulfurous…

…of Lava

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Igneous…

…of Incineration

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Blazing…

…of the Sun

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Volcanic…

…of the Hot Pocket

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Netherrack…

…of Burnination

Add _-_ Fire Damage

Erupting…

…of the Foil Flareon

Add 10-16 Fire Damage

Tingly…

…of Static

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Clingy…

…of Sparks

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Charged…

…of Tazing

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

9 Kilowatt…

…of Shock

Add 1-8 Lightning Damage

Electrified…

…of the Skies

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Battery Powered…

…of the Toaster Oven

Add 1-12 Lightning Damage

Booming…

…of Thunder

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Super Ionized…

…of Zapping

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Tesla’s…

…of 110% Cotton

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Blinding…

…of Defibulation

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Thunderous…

…of Storms

Add _-_ Lightning Damage

Zeus’s…

…of a Thousand Pikachu Souls

Add 1-24 Lightning Damage

Chilly…

…of Condensation

Add 1-2 Ice Damage

Cold…

…of the Snowflake

Add 2-3 Ice Damage

Icy…

…of Frost

Add 3-4 Ice Damage

Snow-Laden…

…of the Snowcone

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Bitter…

…of Snow

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Frozen…

…of Freezing

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Wintery…

…of Hail

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Refridgerated…

…of the Polar Bear

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Glacial…

…of the Space-Yeti

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Frosty’s…

…of Absolute Zero

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Arctic…

…of Nuclear Winter

Add _-_ Ice Damage

Santa’s Li’l…

…of the Abyss

Add 9-15 Ice Damage

Dirty…

…of Dust

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Sodden…

…of Gravel

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Earthen…

…of Soil

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Sandy…

…of Rock

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Heavy…

…of Boulders

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Solid…

…of Immense Weight

Add 4-10 Earth Damage

Sedimentary…

…of Valleys

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Unyielding…

…of Seismic Force

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Quaking…

…of Tremendous Power

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Tectonic…

…of Mountains

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Continental…

…of Unstoppable Mass

Add _-_ Earth Damage

Planetary…

…of the Planets

Add 7-19 Earth Damage

Rash-Inducing…

…of Itchiness

Add 1-2 Nature Damage

Mossy…

…of the Potato

Add 3-5 Nature Damage

Pollen-Covered…

…of the Wild

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Floral…

…of the Forest

Add 6-10 Nature Damage

Fungal…

…of the Wasp

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Leafy…

…of the Cute Little Forest Critters

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Thorny…

…of the Spider

Add 10-17 Nature Damage over 6s.

Poisonous…

…of Overgrowth

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Toxic…

…of Deadly Neurotoxins

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Rafflesian…

…of the Canopy

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Al Gore’s…

…of Nature’s Revenge

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Captain Planet’s…

…of the Sacred Bean

Add _-_ Nature Damage

Tender Loving…

…of Light

Add 1-2 Holy Damage

Holy…

…of Smiting

Add 2-3 Holy Damage

Episcopalian…

…of Faith

Add 3-4 Holy Damage

Blessed…

…of Conviction

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Divine…

…of the Praying Mantis

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Righteous…

…of Sound Doctrine

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Sacred…

…of Retribution

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Consecrated…

…of Vindication

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Angelic…

…of the Minor Prophet Obadiah

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Incorruptible…

…of Absolution

Add 8-13 Holy Damage

Mother Teresa’s…

…of the Flying Nun

Add _-_ Holy Damage

Jesus’s Very Own…

…of Righteous Fury

Add 10-16 Holy Damage

Foul…

…of Taint

Add 1-2 Unholy Damage

Shifty-Eyed…

…of the Occult

Add 2-3 Unholy Damage

Bewitched…

…of Rap Music

Add 3-4 Unholy Damage

Unholy…

…of the Unholy Turnip

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Cruel…

…of Maniacle Laughter

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Black…

…of Corruption

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Evil Lincoln’s…

…of Hatred

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Sinister…

…of Pure Evil

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Demonic…

…of the Damned

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Racist…

…of the Creeper

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Disney Villain’s…

…of Israphel

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Richard Nixon’s…

…of Cursed Frogurt

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Lobbyist’s…

…of Scientology

Add _-_ Unholy Damage

Dark…

…of the Bat

+0.25% Life Stolen Per Hit

Vampiric…

…of Thirst

+0.5% Life Stolen Per Hit

Lawyer’s…

…of Nightmares

+0.75% Life Stolen Per Hit

Politician’s…

…of the High Maintenance Girlfriend

+10% Life Stolen Per Hit

Shady…

…of Trickery

+5% Mana Stolen Per Hit

Entropic…

…of Entropy

+10% Mana Stolen Per Hit

Soul Suckin’…

…of SOULS

+15% Mana Stolen Per Hit

Lightweight…

…of Quickness

+5% Attack Speed

Lubricated…

…of the Lube

+10% Attack Speed

Elvish…

…of the Viper

+15% Attack Speed

Hollowed Out…

…of Zeal

+20% Attack Speed

Furious…

…on Crack

+25% Attack Speed

Otaku…

…of the Six Pool

+30% Attack Speed

Weighted…

…of Smashing

+10% Knockback

Hefty…

…of Slugging

+20% Knockback

Spring-Loaded…

…of Defenestration

+30% Knockback

Fine…

…of Craftsmanship

+10% Durability

Well-Made…

…of Craftsmanship

+15% Durability

Durable…

…of Long-Lasting Flavor

+20% Durability

Trusty…

…from Across the Border

+25% Durability

Almost Superior

…, Now with 50% MORE Durability!

+47% Durability

Superior…

…of Longevity

+50% Durability

Cromulent…

…of Anti-rust

+60% Durability

Dependable…

…from Distant Lands

+70% Durability

Infallible…

…of the Twinkie

+80% Durability

Everlasting…

…of the Ages

+90% Durability

Indestructible…

…of Eternity

+100% Durability

Master Crafted…

…that Through Thick and Thin, will Always be Your Friend

+125% Durability

Adventurer’s…

…of Haste

+5% Movement Speed

Streamlined…

…of Alacrity

+10% Movement Speed

Unchafing…

…of the Traveler

+15% Movement Speed

Scrappy…

…of Benching

+1 Strength

Mighty…

…of Might

+2 Strength

Burly…

…of Intense Saiyan Training

+3 Strength

Sailor’s…

…of Pummeling

+4 Strength

Manly…

…of Face-Beating

+5 Strength

Cleft-Chinned…

…of Spinach

+6 Strength

Bearded…

…of Wrastling

+7 Strength

Roid Ragin’…

…of the Shoryuken

+8 Strength

Barrel-Chested…

…of Giants

+9 Strength

Hylian…

…of the Kayoken x20

+10 Strength

She-Hulks…

…that’d LIKE SOME POOOUND CAKE!!

+11 Strength

A Man’s Man’s…

…of FALCOOON PAUNCH!

+12 Strength

Stretchy…

…of Prancing

+1 Dexterity

Thief’s…

…of the Plie

+2 Dexterity

Nimble…

…That’d Slit its Own Mothers Throat

+3 Dexterity

Squirrely…

…of the Bushy Tail

+4 Dexterity

Bandit’s…

…of the Mantis

+5 Dexterity

Harlequin…

…of the Shadows

+6 Dexterity

Agile…

…of Stealth

+7 Dexterity

Lithe…

…of Dodging

+8 Dexterity

Bandito’s…

…of the Monkey

+9 Dexterity

Pikachu-Skin…

…of the Mongoose

+10 Dexterity

Aerodynamic…

…of the Black Mamba

+11 Dexterity

Assassin’s…

…of the Ninja

+12 Dexterity

Keen…

…of Brains

+1 Intelligence

Apprentice’s…

…of Insight

+2 Intelligence

Tech-Savvy…

…of the Li’l Einsteins

+3 Intelligence

Four-Eyed…

…of the Trickster

+4 Intelligence

Sorcerer’s…

…of Critical Thinking

+5 Intelligence

Astute…

…of the Integral

+6 Intelligence

Cynic’s…

…of the Dolphin

+7 Intelligence

Philosopher’s…

…of the Jew Star

+8 Intelligence

Unopened Collector’s…

…that Can School You in Starcraft

+9 Intelligence

Newtonian…

…of the Double Integral

+10 Intelligence

Archmage’s…

…of Quantum Neutrino Fields

+11 Intelligence

Grand Wizard’s…

…of the Divine Eigenvector

+12 Intelligence

Wrinkly…

…of Learning

+1 Wisdom

Well-Read…

…of Grammar

+2 Wisdom

Studious…

…of Know-How

+3 Wisdom

Scholarly…

…of Knowledge

+4 Wisdom

Well-Informed…

…of Age

+5 Wisdom

Blue…

…from like a Hundred Years Ago

+6 Wisdom

Erudite…

…of the Owl

+7 Wisdom

Ancient…

…of the Spindly Beard

+8 Wisdom

Ancestral…

…of Yore

+9 Wisdom

Sage’s…

…of Forgotten Lore

+10 Wisdom

Solomon’s…

…of the Horadrim

+11 Wisdom

Omnipotent…

…of Staying a While and Listening

+12 Wisdom

Healthy…

…of Health

+1 Fortitude

Robust…

…of Broccoli

+2 Fortitude

Brimming…

…of Anti-Oxidants

+3 Fortitude

Hossly…

…of Vigor

+4 Fortitude

Well-Adjusted…

…of Salad

+5 Fortitude

Red…

…of Gratuitous Meat

+6 Fortitude

Trollish…

…of Mortality

+7 Fortitude

Intrepid…

…of the Hippo

+8 Fortitude

Meat Lover’s…

…of the Juggernaut

+9 Fortitude

Vigorous…

…of the Five-Dozen Eggs

+10 Fortitude

Champion’s…

…of the Collosus

+11 Fortitude

Immortal…

…of Eternal Life

+12 Fortitude

Brilliant…

…of the Fairie

All Stats +1

Spectral…

…of the Katamari

All Stats +2

Rainbow…

…of the Rainbow

All Stats +3

Mox…

…of the Kaleidoscope

All Stats +4

Radiant…

…of the Narwhal

All Stats +5

Prismatic…

…of the Unicorn

All Stats +6

Sexy…

…of the Nyan Cat

All Stats +7

1337…

…of the Double Rainbow

All Stats +8

Bacon-Wrapped…

…of the Black Lotus

All Stats +9

Hilariously Overpowered…

…of Flawed Game Mechanics

All Stats +10

Joseph’s Amazing Technicolor…

…of the Dodeacorn

All Stats +11

Notch’s…

…of the Many Faces of Notch

All Stats +12

Curse effects appear in red, and subtract something from the item.Edit