How Much Does The Friend Opinion Really Matter? [He Said/She Said]

Katie Garrity

When it comes to new boyfriends, there are a million thoughts and feelings rushing through our heads and hearts. We can’t eat, sleep, talk, breathe, etc. Sometimes falling for a new guy can feel like being drunk. You don’t act like yourself. You may not notice yourself turning into a complete crazy, but I can tell you that your friends will.

Your friends will tolerate you talking about this new said BF on the regular for only a few short moments. They are going to get annoyed. They are going to want to punch you in the face if you say “us” or “we” in a sentence pertaining to him one more time, but does this bother you? Do we care that much about what our friends think of our boyfriends? Is it a deal breaker if they don’t?

Sad but true fact: I have almost lost two of my closest and best friends because of a guy. I acted like a crazy person. When we first got together, I completely let them in the dust. I didn’t call, text, hang out with them—nothing. I seriously was on another planet. I did not care that they didn’t like my new guy. My mindset was that if they couldn’t be happy for me, then I didn’t need them in my life. When I was 19, my friend’s opinion of my relationship and my boyfriend did not matter.

Fast forward to now–I’m in my twenties, and I have a completely different view. After a horrible break-up and breakdown with this guy, I was pretty alone. All I kept thinking about was how I could have done this to my friends, and how much they truly mattered to me. I never even knew if they didn’t like him or not, all I knew is that they didn’t like how I was behaving. I was so wrapped up in my guy, that I automatically assumed they didn’t like him and hated our relationship, when really I just never gave them the chance.

When it comes to relationships, yes, it does boil down to the two of you at the end of the day, but your friends matter. To me personally, if my friends aren’t keen on the guy I’m dating, it matters. I know that they don’t have these feelings due to jealously or hate, they have them because they love and care about me. This is something I had to learn the hard way when I was younger, but now I know that guys come and go, but friends last a lifetime. Don’t lose your friends because of a guy.