Friday, September 1, 2017

Within every last one of us, there is an inner 3 year old, proclaiming
at the top of our lungs: “NOW!!! I want it NOW!!!” Doesn’t matter if it’s
weight loss, improvement at the gym, a promotion, a raise, a new job, success
with a project, or just getting your child to clean up their room, the primal
cry is “I want it now!”

Only life doesn’t work that way. Chances are you’ve had to
wait, be patient. Or take a step back, re-consider, re-vamp, take a different
approach. And often it may seem like you’ve had to give up your hopes and
dreams, because how long can someone wait?

But what if it wasn’t about waiting? What if is was more
about trusting that if you’re doing the best you know how towards your goal,
that somehow, some way, it will come through? And that maybe, you have some other
desire that is interfering with your dream coming true right now?

I met with a very dear friend recently that I had not seen
in decades; we live on opposite ends of the US. I’d known him as a young actor
in Los Angeles. His acting career didn’t take off as he’d hoped, despite good
reviews, so he went on to do other things – including move across the country.
But his passion never waned. He used his acting talents to record books on
tape, kept his craft up in other ways, and much to his surprise, now as he
turns 50, he’s landed an agent and is consistently getting good parts in movies
and TV.

I asked him about what he thought happened--apart from his
never letting the dream die within himself--to bring about the change. He said,
“You know, I’ve thought about it a lot, and I realize that hearth and home were
more important to me than advancing my career. Whenever I’d see an audition
call for a part that would take me away from home for more than a couple of
days, I wouldn’t go for the audition. Which means that unlike my peers, who
were getting parts in touring companies, amping their resumes, I was sticking
close to my friends and family. Thus, a weak resume. But I didn’t think about
it that way.”

Friends and family are still important to him, but he’s
realized he doesn’t need to be with them all the time. He is free (within
himself) to accept the roles that come along. My friend’s talent and true love
of acting were never in doubt. I was so very happy for him that he could
finally let them come through and enjoy the success he so very much deserves.

You may want to lose weight, but you don’t want to say “No”
to dinner with friends. You may want to get to the gym, but you don’t want to
be late to work. You may want a promotion, but you may not be willing to give up
your family time to acquire the new skills you’d need. And you may really want
your child to clean up their room, but you are reluctant to take the time for
that conversation you fear may go nowhere.

Sometimes it’s not about waiting. It’s about sorting out
“What do I really want, right now?” that stands in the way. Once you sort it
out, you will still need to work towards your greater goal, but at least you
won’t be stumbling over your own conflicting desires on your way to getting
there.

Thursday, August 24, 2017

In the course of my work as a trial consultant, I spend a
fair amount of time in law offices working with litigators – lawyers who try
cases in the courtroom. I had scheduled a work session with an attorney for
10:30 a.m., figuring we’d only need a couple of hours, and we’d be done before
lunch. Imagine my surprise when I received a call from the attorney – a woman
in her late 60’s - requesting that we
move the meeting to 10:00 a.m., so that she could make it to the yoga class her
law firm held in their offices at noon!

My first thought was “What an enlightened law firm!” My
second was “Yes, of course! I’d be delighted to change the appointment time” –
even though it meant I had to re-arrange my morning to accommodate her. I was
thrilled that this firm understood the tremendous importance of respecting the
well-being of their attorneys, that it was willing not only to pay for the
instructor, but to make a room available for yoga and forgo what would
otherwise be “billable hours” from the attending attorneys. And doubly thrilled
that the litigator I was working with valued herself enough to participate in
the class.

Yoga does so much good for body and soul, especially for
those of us over 60. Here are but a few examples of vibrant women whose
dedication to yoga has paid off in joy, health and longevity:

Bette
Calman, 90, a highly respected yoga teacher for 50 years, she’s now known
as “Yoga Super Granny.” She shot to international fame when she starred in an
Advil commercial during the 2016 Super Bowl.

Tao
Porchon-Lynch, 98, was recognized as the world's oldest yoga teacher by the
Guinness Book of World Records at age
93 – and she’s still teaching! Her phenomenal background includes marching with
Mahatma Gandhi twice, and helping people escape the Nazis as a French
Resistance fighter during World War II. Besides yoga, she took up ballroom
dancing at the “young” age of 85. Tao’s mantra is “There is nothing you cannot
do.” It’s one she has taken to heart throughout her life and is a great example
for all of us.

Anna
Pesce, 87, corrected her hunchback posture in just 2 years with the help of
a certified back-care yoga instructor. She says she feels wonderful now because
she can drive and do many things she couldn’t before.

So how does it work? How, specifically, does yoga benefit
your body and mind?

In terms of your body, yoga improves balance, which becomes
increasingly important as we age. Yoga promotes bone strength, because the
nature of the movements themselves improves bone density, which tends to
decrease over time. Yoga is a low-impact form of exercise, which means that it
strengthens your muscles gently, and in the process, prevents them from
atrophying. Stronger muscles mean less stress on your joints, thus easing
arthritis.

Yoga also lowers blood pressure without putting undue
pressure on your cardiovascular system, which is why it is (for most people,
always check with your physician!) particularly well suited as part of a
lowering-blood-pressure program. Because yoga incorporates deep breathing as a
part of the practice, more oxygen is circulated throughout your body, to the
benefit of all your internal organs and systems.

On the plus side for your mental and emotional state, yoga stimulates
certain chemical releases in the body that can diminish anxiety and promote an
overall feeling of relaxation. Because yoga relieves tension, many find that it
improves their sleep. Along with that, yoga has been shown to increase your
memory and ability to process cognitively, something we all can appreciate as
we grow into our later years!

Why is it important to know about the benefits of yoga? Because
it lends itself to a little-known health trick: The more you know about how something benefits you, the greater the
benefit.

Nowhere was
this phenomenon better demonstrated than in the remarkable “Hotel Maids” study. The maids in two hotels did work that added up to more than 30
minutes of daily exercise. At the first hotel, the researchers told the maids
how many calories they burned as they cleaned their way through the equivalent
of 30 minutes of exercise. The researchers said nothing to the maids at the
second hotel. After just one month, having made no changes to their diet or
exercise routine outside of work (which was virtually nil), the maids in the
first hotel weighed an average
of two pounds less, had a smaller percent of body fat, and systolic blood
pressure an average of 10 points lower. The maids in the second hotel
experienced no change.

What
happened? The maids in the first hotel now had information about specific
benefits of their work beyond a paycheck. Their subconscious transmitted the benefits-message
to their bodies, which resulted in weight loss, less body fat and lower blood
pressure. Yet the maids weren’t physically doing anything different.

Of course,
maid work is much different than yoga, but the concept is the same. Harness the
power of your mind as you engage in the practice of yoga. Know the specific
value and benefits that yoga brings to you, both physically and mentally. You
cannot help but thrive!

Noelle
Nelson, PhD is passionate about personal growth, happiness and appreciating
this amazing experience called “life.” She’s devoted the last three years to
the study of longevity and wrote the book, “Happy Healthy . . . Dead: Why
What You Think You Know About Aging Is Wrong And How To Get It Right.” She
continues to uncover many amazing people
who are in the 80s, 90s and beyond who are doing wonderful and exciting thingswith
enthusiasm and gusto regardless of age or physical condition. Find their
stories on Facebook at Meet
The Amazings!

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Here's a link to my article in the September issue of Unity magazine. It hits on how attitude plays such a big role on how we view aging. I hope it's helpful. If we're fortunate to live into our 70s, 80s, 90s and beyond--let's make sure we live it to the fullest!Longevity 2.0

Thursday, August 17, 2017

Beauty magazine
Allure is giving the heave-ho to the term “anti-aging,” and, instead,
is ready to “celebrate the beauty in all ages.” Actress Helen Mirren, age 72,
is on the cover of its September issue.

Nelson explains
that as we age—every wrinkle, every scar—tells a story about our lives.
“Imagine reaching age 60 with no laugh lines!” she says.

During her
research for “Happy Healthy…Dead,” she discovered people in their 70s, 80s,
90s, even 100s who are thriving, enjoying life and accomplishing great things.
It led to her creating “Meet The Amazings!” on Facebook where she celebrates people
who understand that life is to be lived with enthusiasm and gusto, whatever age
or physical condition. Since she began Meet The Amazings! in 2016, she’s posted
over 100of these “amazing” stories.

“Growing older is a wonderful thing because it means that we get a chance, every day, to live
a full happy life,” says Michelle Lee, Allure
editor-in-chief on August 14, 2017 on the magazine’s website.“I hope we can all get to a point where
we recognize that beauty is not something just for the young.”

The magazine’s
website also includes quotes from 29 celebrities including Oprah Winfrey (age 63), Ellen
Barkin (age 63) and Diane Von Furstenberg (age 70) about their positive views
on their later years.

“Some may
think, ‘oh, they’re celebrities, of course they’re going to enjoy life,’” says
Nelson, “but I’ve found countless numbers of amazing older folks, from all walks of life and all
economic conditions who have the exact same, enjoy-life-to-the fullest
attitude.”

About Me

I'm a psychologist, consultant and speaker who has authored over a dozen books, all of which focus on empowering individuals to be happier, healthier and more successful at work, at home and in relationships. The power of appreciation is the theme that runs through all my books, the latest being "Happy Healthy...Dead: Happy Healthy…Dead: Why What You Think You Know About Aging Is Wrong and How To Get It Right.” If you'd like to know more, please visit www.noellenelson.com!
Thank you.