Thursday, February 22, 2007

Randomthoughts of a Mommy who is not adjusting so very well to staying at home so DANG much and is watching waaaaaaaay too much TV and feels OBLIGATED to share it with the vast nothing that reads my blog - or to the LURKERS who NEVER comment. I know you're there. I see you coming and going. If we could only get on speaking terms!

or

How many links can I put in this post?

1. I don't like Obama. For a lot of reasons, but my favorite reason is his name is too much like OSAMA and I really don't like OSAMA.

I'm working on a conspiracy theory here. Or I'm paranoidy nutso. But, THAT'S a whole-nother post.

Now.... Stay with me... If you take the "B" out of Barack, it sounds like "Iraq". And if you change the "b" in Obama to "s", then you have Osama.

Barack IraqObama Osama

anyone? anyone?

yeah. Big conspiracy here. I just have to figure out the rest of it. And how Area 51 is involved. Cuz it's ALWAYS linked to the aliens.

5. And how in the name of all that is Holy and Beautiful do I get rid of infant acne?

evil evil infant acne!

Except I just learned that it's not acne. It's eczema. Evil evil eczema, whose name I want to type with an "x" for some reason, but must leave my beautiful son's face at this moment.

And you use .05% hydrocortisone cream on it. And it takes a LONG time. And when you rub it on his little cheeks and chin, he tries to latch on to your finger tip and nurse.

And those UGLY little bumps looked like Dennis the Menace freckles before they started to clear up.

6. Back to politics for just a sec.

Are we as Americans so dang STUPID that we need the very rich, very self-serving, very self-righteous, very nutty celebrities to tell us how we should think and feel about topics - and my recent favorite - who (whom?) should get our votes?

Are we? I'm not! I find it ridiculous and sad that actors, models, directors and producers have the ability to hand-select their favorite pawn politician and put them into a position where they can have a powerful influence on our country and its government.

Do we, as individuals and voters, lack the confidence and decision-making skills to choose a political candidate on our friggin' own without asking David Geffen or Angelina Jolie or that tall guy from the Shawshank Redemption?

7. Today is Friday, March 9, 2007. I am 6 weeks 1 day postpartum. Lucky weighs 12 lbs PLUS. I lack 5 lbs to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I had my postpartum check today. I'm "anatomically" healed and released from physician care. woohoo!!!

8. My hormones, which have been pretty stable since Lucky's birth, went on a roller coaster ride yesterday. I cried about nothing. When The Mighty Hunter asked what was wrong, I cried more and told him to leave me alone. I seemed to be feeling better, so he asked if I was ok, which only made me start crying again. idiot. He ought to know that I want to be left alone until I'm ready for a hug. And when hug-time arrives, he'd better be standing with his arms outstretched, hands patting the air, missing only my body in the embrace! sheesh!

9. Our stinky farm dog has fleas and has gnawed the hair off his butt. It's sad.

10. The Mighty Hunter broke our digital camera earlier this week. It still works when you apply the high tech adhesive to hold the battery cover closed.

11. How can they KILL Capt America? Not that I've ever read the cartoon. But it's like killing Capt Earth!

12. The guy who dismembered his wife. Stephen Grant. Yeah. He doesn't look like someone who has lost touch with reality at all.

13. Barbie Bandits. She was all, "We're gonna rob a bank cuz my friend that like totally likes me, he works there and then we'll buy some really HOT clothes that show off my HOT teen bod and then I'm gonna like spend my money on like a really expensive but badly-done bleach job and look just like Barbie doll! And THEN, I'm gonna REALLY SPLURGE! I'm gonna eat dinner at the Cheesecake Factory. OMG! Cuz its like totally the most rockin yumm-o kewl place to like eat really expensive stuff like cheesecake and then, we're gonna totally fun from the law like those old women Thelma and Lucy in that old movie, cuz we like totally broke some big like royal laws or something. We totally ROCK! Now, like, lets get facials and some kewl make-overs - oh crap! the cops!"