Rants and Raves from the Geek Closet

Star Wars Life Advice

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life so far, it’s this: there is a Star Wars quote for every occasion.

You will seldom find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.

Is he talking about Mos Eisley…or YouTube?

I find your lack of faith disturbing.

It’s the perfect comeback for anyone who thinks you can’t finish an assignment in one night, get caught up on a five-season show in a week, or read 50 books in a year. Darth Vader knows how to shut up the haters.

No! Try not! Do, or do not. There is no try.

Actually, in all seriousness, I say this to myself all the time. If you’re going to do something challenging, you better commit. There’s nothing worse than trying and then giving up halfway through because you didn’t want to actually work at it.

Anyway, Yoda is great when you want mystical guru advice, but for a good insult, one must look to Princess Leia.

Aren’t you a little short for a Storm Trooper?

Will somebody get this big walking carpet out of my way?

Why, you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking…nerf-herder!

Han, on the other hand, is good at inspirational pep talks…as long as he’s talking to/about himself.

Never tell me the odds!

And nobody’s better at avoiding awkward conversations.

Sorry about the mess.

*blasts intercom* Boring conversation anyway.

Shut him up or shut him down!

Fly casual.

Then there’s the all-purpose:

I have a bad feeling about this.

And the universal greeting/farewell:

May the Force be with you.

And the ultimate pickup line/marriage proposal:

I love you.

I know.

Yep, you know you have a major problem if it can’t be fixed with a cup of tea and a Star Wars quote. And if you’re unfortunate enough to run across a problem that big, you can always resort to crying: