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Topic: Your holiday hill to die on. (Read 880057 times)

Ah, Valentine's Day. Way back in the Stone Age when DH and I were dating, I so desperately wanted Valentine's Day to be a "thing" for us. It *was* my hill to die on at that time. I made it a big deal, DH balked and it devolved into a yearly argument and source of tension between us.

I finally acknowledged within myself that the only reason that I wanted it to be a "thing" is that I wanted to be able to flaunt my new jewelry, flowers, whatever around the office like everyone else. Hell, even the guy I sat next to at work for eight years got flowers from his girlfriend/now wife every year on Valentine's Day. Was I chopped liver?

After a couple of years of this nonsense, I finally came to terms that while DH was a great guy in many ways, he did not jive with conventional holidays. He's a gift giver, but at random ways and times that keep you on your toes. Since then, we've been taking the day off and going to the Chicago Auto Show, which while not scream "Valentine's Day" to everyone else, is our little Valentine's tradition that we both enjoy.

Ok, brought up v-day problem to BFF who consulted lesbian aunts. Apparently the fact that we're both girls should mean there are two people in the relationship who want big v-day hoopla. In straight relationships the woman loves v-day, the men go along with it so as not to anger the woman. So if there are two women, there's no one resisting. Well, at least that actually makes some kind of sense based on what TV has taught me.

When our first v-day together came up she asked if I was a valentine's day girl. I told her my feelings where that I'd rather have flowers on the ground hog's day just because, rather then the 14th because the rules say so. Which prompted her to send me flowers on ground hog's day. And on every ground hog's day since. Most romantic thing ever.

When we were dating, DH and I would go out for V day. We have been married for 16 years, and will celebrate our 20th couple anniversary this year, so we don't have that need to prove anything any more.

I get one rose, I make dinner for the three of us, steak and seafood. I always make a bittersweet chocolate cake in a heart shaped pan.

At work, some of us are going to bring things to have a Valentine's tea that morning. I am making dark chocolate cake with raspberry whipped cream.

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ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."-J.R.R Tolkien

I am incredibly excited for Valentine's Day this year because I will be front row at the Britney Spears concert in Las Vegas. The fact that my DH researched and planned the whole trip knowing it would make me happy, and that he has been listening to Britney for the past few weeks so he knows all the songs, is clear evidence of true love in my view! By the way, I am 40 years old and he is 48 so that makes it even sweeter of him!

So, just to be clear, I'm not bagging on Valentine's Day itself. If you love the holiday, then love it! Celebrate it and enjoy it!

My BFF and his partner love Valentine's Day, they always plan something special for the day and send out cards to those they love. According to them, it's a day for love, all love, not just romantic squishy face love. It's very sweet. I don't begrudge them their holiday at all.

Huh, 2 dudes, yay v-day. Two chicks, meh, just another day. So much for TV lessons about guys going along with it for their ladies.

Every once in a while the gals that he works with try to guilt him to get me jewlery or something. ("What do you mean you didn't get Ginger anything?!?!?! Go down to the gift shop and get her those cute earrings.") But generally we are doing well to get a card.

My boyfriend's sister-in-law chastised him for buying me cheese for my birthday instead of jewelry, until I told her that I had asked for cheese. Now she thinks we're both nuts.

I love Valentine's Day because I like to view it as a celebration of all types of love, but I hate all the "traditional" ways of celebrating. The romantic restaurants are all too crowded, I'm picky about chocolate, and I dislike roses. So this year I'm continuing my long-standing tradition of eating pizza on the couch in my pajamas while watching a movie. It's going to be awesome.

DH & I don't usually do much for v-day. Cards and maybe token gifts, but last year he sent me a dozen roses at work as a surprise. I was VERY surprised. And pleased. Nobody'd ever done that for me before. :-D

This year I don't even know if he's off work that evening or not. I asked the other day if he knew yet or not, and he had a bit of a head-smack moment until I reminded him that I have long understood that him having a service industry career will mean a lot of holidays celebrated on other days. Not a big deal.

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What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

He hears male colleagues complaining about whatever obligatory traditional gift they must bring home to their SO.He boasts that his DW (that's me )has never required that of him.He comes home and relays those conversations to me, and tells me how great I am.

The then kiddos give us glued-together paper valentines with tissue-paper flowers and a Tootsie roll or some such treat.

Then we all stay home, and avoid this overpriced "amateur night" at the restaraunts.

Whenever anyone has expressed horror that DH doesn't "do anything" for me on valentine's day I always explain to them that, for over 20 years, he has cuddled with me while we watch tv, reached for my hand while we walk, stayed up till 4am talking things out, brought home a favorite treat for no reason, and never once hesitated to say "I love you!" before hanging up the phone. Not when he was a Marine and not now that he works in a very male-dominated career around a few uber-macho dudes. Why the heck would I need flowers and chocolates on February 14th to feel loved?!

One year he was away at training on V day. One of his coworkers insisted he needed to have flowers delivered "or else". DH laughed and said "You obviously don't know my wife. Spending $50 on something that will get thrown out in a few days is NOT how to make her happy!"

I'll admit that one year I did pester him mercilessly for a heart-shaped box of Sees candies. They were pretty good but once I found out how much they cost I apologized for guilting him into buying them and made him promise he'd never do it again. I had been using the occasion as an excuse to get 2lbs of chocolate without feeling bad about it. Now I just buy smaller amounts more frequently.

My husband buys me flowers every Wednesday or Thursday. Nothing expensive - those cheaper bunches at the grocery store about 99% of the time. Since V-Day is on a Friday this year, he may not buy them since they'll be marked up and more expensive. If he does buy, he won't buy one that is specifically aimed at V-day - not to make a statement, but because they are red and pink and the wrapping has hearts on them they get to raise the price even more.

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"The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones" - Solomon ibn Gabirol