5 Tips for Finding Love in the New Year

For a great many of us, a new year is about a new us; whether that involves a new job, a new dress size or a new outlook on life. For others, this just might be the year to find true love. Check out these five tips to maximize your chances of finding that special someone.

5 Tips for Finding Love in the New Year

1. Be yourself.

True romance happens when two people love each other despite their differences. My favorite couple votes opposite politics and pulls for rival football teams. He’s an academic most at home with his books. She’s a beach girl most comfortable on her paddle-board. Because they are free to be themselves, when they undertake mutual passions, like travel and exercise, it leads to, well, more passion, if you get my drift. On the other hand, sometimes sharing the same passions is important. So…

2. Put yourself in the right places.

If you are an outdoor person, put yourself with those who fish, boat, run, work out or play tennis. If you are into the classical scene, go to the symphony instead of the local bar. If faith is important, find a place of worship. Your chances of finding love increase when you surround yourself with those who have some shared interests and lifestyles.

3. Be open.

Sometimes love doesn’t come packaged, or delivered, in the way you'd think. A friend moved to the other side of the country. An acquaintance invited her to dinner. She hesitated. These people traveled in different circles than she and were from unfamiliar cultural backgrounds. She decided to be open to new people and experiences. A 3-minute conversation with a single man led to coffee, then lunch, then dinner and to an exclusive relationship which might never have happened had she not decided to be open to a new experience.

4. Be aware.

Sometimes love is right under your nose. Remember the movie “Sweet Home Alabama?” Reese Witherspoon’s character traveled to “big city”, where she thinks she’s found true love. Turns out, true love had been right under her nose. Sometimes, romance is sitting in the desk or the house or the pew next to you. Sometimes, true love is not the dream that lives in our mind, but the real person who crosses our path daily or weekly, but we never even notice. Look up. You might absolutely love what you see. Then again, sometimes we need to…

5. Stop looking.

Sometimes love comes when you stop looking for it. For one month this year, concentrate on you. Do what makes you happy. Go to the gym or library or theater, or beach. Travel, take bubble baths, long walks with your dog, or a bike ride. Take a cooking or painting or wine appreciation class. In other words, feed yourself the things that make you happy. You will exude an aura of upbeat confidence that causes others to take notice. And chances are, they will notice when you are least expecting it, but perhaps are most ready for it.

Drexel Gilbert is a career TV journalist and relationship expert. Her practical advice for couples is bringing healing and breathing life into relationships. 30 Days to Better Love: A Guide for Men is used by couples’ counselors and by men and women just like you. Find it at amazon.com and drexelgilbert.com