Rant 1: A conference to remember

Rant 1: A Conference to Remember
..What a Conference!.. As conferences go the Labour Party one was a masterpiece. The residue of Blairites, still puzzled by democracy and still clinging resolutely onto control of party organisation, smiled through gritted teeth as delegate after delegate spoke in adoration of the parties visionary leader. Watson buoyed up by cheers and applause from his mingling grey suited entourage, reminisced about his ‘famous five’ visit Glastonbury experience. I wonder if he left his wellies outside the tent for cleaning at night? Anyway, while at the festival he had experienced a fascinating in body experience. The skies had opened and a voice that sounded like Alistair Campbell had declared that “Corbyn must be followed” adding the rider “For now anyway.” The speed at which Watson swapped his well thumbed copy of “Blair’s guide to self advancement” for an “I love Corbyn” ‘T’ shirt was startling. When Tom’s speech was over and the applause of his entourage had died away, delegates watched bemused as he was welcomed back to the fold by a stream of beaming party representatives. They were not smiling to welcome Tom back. They were smiling in victory. Sadiq Khan apparently had experienced a similar awakening to Tom Watson. The experience had probably happened while he was tallying all the socialist deeds he had done this year on a specially made one bead abacus. There was not a wet eye in the house when he declared that he is now in love with Jeremy Corbyn and this was now a real and enduring love. As the conference moved on with Corbyn’s credibility rising more with each speaker, NEC Head Baron, Iain McNicholl listened in conscienceless silence. The realisation was slowly dawning that the red carpet he had ordered for Blair’s second coming would now not be required. Nothing could stop the tide of confidence that poured out of the conference doors with the radiant and resolute delegates. Not even Laura Kuensberg who could normally turn milk sour at 50 paces. The media pundits were visibly stunned and even the BBC’s attempt to declare that the Labour party is now split with anti semitism, was not delivered with much enthusiasm. Murdoch and the other right wing media moguls must be sending more and more frantic commands down the line in an attempt to stop the rise of this one person phenomena. Theresa May’s empassioned plea that Capitalism is wonderful and socialism is for thickies who can’t add up could not even dent the bumper of the Corbyn express. The idea that the austerity of cutting all social budgets is a prudent method of reducing debt has been blown out of the water by this conference. The taking back of PFI debt into government control, the ending of tuition fees etc etc can all be achieved, not by austerity but by simply taxing the top 5% of wealthy people just a few percent. When people absorb the fact that austerity was never necessary, the Tories will have big questions to answer. People have died in the name of austerity. The world is witnessing history being made. Something unique in politics. An honest and sincere politician walks down the road to greatness. A walk as certain as Mandela’s famous walk to freedom. All in all this was a great landmark conference. It sets an unassailable benchmark for next weeks Tory conference. Oh Jeremy Corbyn!….Tony Laborman

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