All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

I was hesitant to pick this interesting product as a unitasker selection. My trepidation wasn’t because of the product’s “delicate” nature, but because I honestly have no clue if it even has one purpose. I’m afraid it might be a “no-tasker.”

The Poop Freeze Aerosol Freeze Spray is supposed to do what its name suggests — freeze your dog’s mess. But, what I don’t understand is WHY?!! Why would you want to freeze it?! At what point in the process? And, what does one do with it after it’s frozen??

At $11 a can, I’m also a little skeptical that this is the best solution if you would wish to use such a thing. A quick peek at the product reviews and I learned it’s not the best option. Apparently, hairspray and a can of compressed air (simply held upside down) will do the exact same thing. (The reviews of the product are actually some of the worst I have ever seen on Amazon.) Too bad Vapoorize isn’t a real product.

However, if you can find a reason for this product, you may also want the Poop Freeze Carry Tote. There is nothing cooler than walking around the dog park with a tote that says “Poop Freeze” on it! (No pun intended in that last sentence.)

You know, I had a similar reaction, but a dog trainer friend – who has to pick up a lot of poop outside her facility – says that it’s actually quite useful. Sometimes it can be, um, not the right consistency to just scoop into a bag. So… I can see the utility of this, believe it or not.

Ditto on the… um… “consistency issue. I a pet with a sensitive digestive system and a friend who was pet sitting that didn’t understand about it. So if they don’t close the container very well and ants get into the pet food, they can’t just buy any ol’ brand of food that might have wheat or corn in it because that will make things hard to pick up in the usual way.

I understand that you can hold canned air upside down, but since you’re using it for a purpose it’s not designed for you run the risk of, you know, spatter.

Personally, I’d rather pay attention to what my pet eats so I don’t HAVE to buy a product with “poop” in the name.

all that said… this doesn’t seem wrothwhile to me, but someone who is pretty hard-headed and budget conscious said nice things about it, so there you go. I find that this whole process is basically a good way to make use of plastic bags that accumulate around the house :).

John – re: “Jen – in the house?!?!?” We have a couple of little Italian Greyhounds that we adore, but unfortunately, the breed is notorious for randomly deciding that they won’t trouble you to let them out…

We knew that when we got them, we don’t have carpets, so we just deal with it.

That said, I would never buy this. I’m with whoever said to watch their diets (though dogs are known for sometimes helping themselves to incredibly disgusting and indigestible objects.)

Not to defend this particular brand, but the product does have some multi-tasking qualities. This type of product can also be used to freeze carelessly discarded chewing gum making it much easier to peel away from whatever surface it was stuck to.

Your point being… what? That the dog owner is obliged to get every last scrap of goo off every last blade of grass? I suggested the bag-covered scoop on the assumption that scooping up the majority of the crap would suffice. (I am aware that gooey poop sticks to grass.) Just how, um, anal do we have to be about the organic matter, here?

I’m reminded of a Seinfeld bit where he suggested that when the aliens land on Earth they’ll assume dogs are the master race, because we’re the ones walking behind them picking up their crap (after freezing it first, natch).

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