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Category: reality TV

The Real Housewives franchise. Truly, has there been any other that has spawned quite so many spin-offs? Indeed, the entire Bravo network might now be more realistically dubbed The Real Housewives Channel, as that’s their main bread and butter. In the beginning, the format did not appeal to me. I was[…]

I’m constantly triggered watching The Bachelorette because Luke — the “Bad Boy” of the season — is not only constantly picking fights with other contestants, he’s behaving towards Hannah with classic traits of a stalker. For one thing, I take you back to the Man Pageant episode at the very[…]

In case you didn’t know, Four Weddings is on Hulu. Go, go, go! There was a time in cable television when we went absolutely bonkers for wedding-related content, running the spectrum from the saccharine Say Yes to the Dress to the hate-watch Bridezillas. Does anyone remember Whose Wedding Is It Anyway? Because I DO. I lapped up every program[…]

Okay, the first time I heard about the reality show Vanderpump Rules, I thought it was a joke. It’s a soap opera surrounding the bed-hopping staff of a restaurant owned by a Real Housewife. I, a connoisSUR of reality TV of the lowest order, refused to lower myself to watch[…]

It’s not me, it’s them. I’m having relationship trouble with reality TV dating shows. It’s a very unhealthy relationship, you see. They make me so upset, but I can’t stay away. Take, for example, my latest new addiction: Paradise Hotel on Fox. Which was cancelled-ish after 4 episodes. I mean, -ish. The show[…]

As I sit here watching I Wanna Marry “Harry,” the FOX reality show where 12 American women vie for the heart of a man they’ve been led to believe is Prince Harry, it occurs to me how mean reality television used to be. Nowadays, the biggest reality TV program is, without question, Keeping[…]

It’s soooo easy to make fun of Gwyneth Paltrow and GOOP. Soo easy. TOO easy! It’s almost boring! Goop has been around since September 2008, and at this point, it’s almost impossible to poke fun at or parody the concept without instantly becoming a hackneyed, tired cliché. Enter Kourtney Kardashian… and… POOSH.[…]

Ok, I have made it very clear that I have Strong Opinions™ about Hannah B. as the 15th Bachelorette. I’ll be perfectly honest: I haven’t liked Hannah (B) ever since she couldn’t come up with a toast. I thought maybe, maybe she was just flustered in the moment, but her After The Final[…]

Bachelor spoilers ahead! It happens every season: after a certain point, the “fun” contestants have all departed, yet we still keep watching for some reason cuz we wanna see which Lauren B the Bachelor will stand on a beach and bequeath the Neil Lane diamond to. And I’m pretty sure,[…]

Have you seen the season premiere of The Bachelor? It aired on Monday. It was a 3-hour live television event! Or was it? For years, Chris Harrison has been screaming at us that we can expect THE MOST DRAMATIC SEASON YET but I’ve got a funny feeling that this time,[…]

I’m a CHAMPION sleeper. I’m asleep by 9pm most nights, and wake up by 6am most morning for work. I sleep SOUNDLY, have graphic DREAMS (which I journal, obviously!) and — compared to so many of my peers who struggle with sleep — I consider myself lucky that I’m[…]

LaDiEs, who’s lining up to be strung along by ^^^THIS HUNK^^^ only to be dumped after learning that his feelings for you were all FAKED because he’s afraid of REJECTING WOMEN!?!?! Aaaaaany takers? In a shocking announcement last week on GMA, it was announced that Colton Underwood will be 2019’s lucky Bachelor. Raising the[…]

Generally speaking, I’m not a huge fan of makeover shows anyway. in the Venn Diagram of “Things I Hate” and “Things I Watch Ironically,” “Makeover Shows” stay squarely in the former category. Maybe it’s the little girl inside me, who remembers being forced to wear way-too-uncomfortable tights with dresses,[…]

Yes, I read the blog post. The one everyone was talking about: Men Prefer Debt-Free Virgins Who’ve Never Spoken To Anyone Outside Their Immediate Family, by The Brainwashed Wife. I kid, I kid! But you know the one. Look, far be it from me to criticize someone for blogging their unpopular[…]

If you ever wondered whether “my generation” would someday look back on the Jersey Shore days with fondness and nostalgia, then I can answer, YES. Jersey Shore premiered on December 3rd, 2009. Like, feels like a lifetime ago, doesn’t it? That’s just the illusion caused by the nonstop onslaught of horrifying news that[…]

I’m still mad. Yep, hex the shit out of him. For, as I’m learning, men don’t mature. They just become salt-and-pepper human shitbags. You’d think that a man of 36 would be capable of having meaningful relationships? But, no. ICYMI, apparently, Arie (aka “The Worst Bachelor In History”),[…]

Hello hello hello!!! I am *not* revealing (Ru-vealing?) any spoilers, I am just going to say that I was VERY PLEASED with the outcome of All Stars 3, even if I had to pause the episode four minutes and fourteen seconds before the end to take an Anxiety Shit before[…]

Attn: ABC, Bachelor Franchise, Chris Harrison, et al: You have a problem. Arie’s season debuted to record low ratings. People are turning away from the franchise in record numbers. You got your asses handed to you by Young Sheldon, for crying out loud! Let’s not even speak of the Bachelor in Paradise. Let’s NOT. Your[…]

So I just told you in my boat post that I’ve been struggling with finding “inspiration.” That’s pretty harsh, but it’s true. I’ve been actively searching for, but (largely) failing to find, things that excite me. Apologies in advance for sounding like a total jerk, but I’ve been going through a big period[…]