Everton's rudderless woes were laid bare for all to see in a truly humiliating outing at sparsely populated Goodison Park in the Europa League on Thursday evening, losing 5-1 at home to Atalanta.

The Serie A mid-tablers, playing only their second ever competitive game on British soil, went a 1-0 up inside 12 minutes only to heap the misery uponDavid Unsworth's sallow side with a late blitz, popping in goals from all angles as the Toffees defence slowly dissolved into a fine mist.

Hey, you kids ever heard of Diego Maradona? Back in the 1970s and 80s, he was kind of like Lionel Messi if Lionel Messi had a predilection for acting the giddy goat and gorging himself senseless on Class A narcotics.

Undoubtedly more spontaneous and playful than Messi, the man they callThe Golden Child was the best footballer in the world and arguably the most naturally gifted player ever to take to a pitch in anger.

Everton moseyed into the Europa League group stage as a 50-yard stunner from Gylfi Sigurdsson secured a 3-1 aggregate win over Hajduk Split in the play-offs.

Making his first full start for the Toffees since his £45million move from Swansea, Sigurdsson chased down a loose ball and let rip from way out on the flank to score less than a minute after the start of the second half.

The Premier League will have five teams competing in the Champions League group stage for the first time ever after Liverpool sauntered past Hoffenheim in the second leg of their play-off at Anfield last night.

After emerging from Germany with a 2-1 win in the first leg, a four-goal glut in the second ensured that Jurgen Klopp's merry band of jesters made the aggregate cut.

Houston's NRG Stadium played host to the first ever Manchester derby to be played on foreign soil on Thursday night, with the two sides squaring off in the International Champions Cup apropos of nothing.

For what little it's worth, United emerged victorious in front of over 67,000 fans as Romelu Lukaku and Marcus Rashford both registered smart goals in a 2-0 win for Jose Mourinho's mob.

Cristiano Ronaldo brokeJimmy Greaves' long-standing European goal-scoring record with two goals in Real Madrid's 4-1 win over Celta Vigo on Wednesday evening.

By opening the scoring with just 10 minutes on the clock, Ronaldo brought up his 367th goal in one of Europe's top five leagues, thus surpassing the overall career tally amassed by Greaves (366) in 1971, some 46 years ago.

Having not featured for Stoke since January, Xherdan Shaqiri was keen to remind folks of his existence and as such posted a couple of highlights mustered during yesterday's Switzerland training session.

With a qualifier against Latvia to limber up for, Shaqiri pulled a fewstunners out of the bag, lashing home threestonking acrobatic volleys over the course of the afternoon.

Gareth Bale has declared that he is not seeking any immediate move away from Real Madrid since he feels happy at the club.

The Welshman's future at the Santiago Bernabeu has been an ever present speculation. Even though he has joined the club as the world record transfer, Cristiano Ronaldo continues to be seen as the number one not just at the club but across the world.

Much travelled Nigerian striker Yakubu scored this goal which he so often scored when playing in the Premier League, he may have lost a little pace but his finishing seem's to be as good as ever as he helped Reading to a 2-1 away win against 10 man Derby to book their place in the FA Cup quarter-Finals!

Aston Villa winger Carles Gil uses this fantastic piece of skill to assist Villa's first premier League in over 11 hours as Jores Okore got on the end of his cross to head home, however it wasn't enough as Branislav Ivanovic grabbed the winner in the 68th minute at Villa Park.

Mesut Ozil grabbed the opener on 11 minutes against Tottenham at White Hart Lane today and though it may not have influenced the scoreline to significantly it could have only for Super Harry Kane to grab a brace to give Spurs a memorable North London Derby victory.

Though judging by the highlight above it does look like the officials got this one spot on as Dier looks to have played Ozil on?

Saul Niguez put Atletico Madrid 2-0 up against Real in the Madrid Derby with this acrobatic volley which you could be forgiven for watching over and over again as I'm sure Atletico fans will do following their 4-0 thrashing of their rivals.

Ever thought you could have finished that chance Olivier Giroud just missed? Or that the killer passes Mesut Ozil makes look easy, are actually easy? There is only one way to find out put on those boots, don the prized 1980's Arsenal strip sponsored by JVC and show the world just how good you [...]

I think that most, or at least a decent proportion, of Arsenal fans would admit that they would still like to see him score more goals, but the brilliant way that our Germany international Mesut Ozil has kicked off the current season has seen the Gooners and the football media become fulsome in the praise [.

You might think that the Arsenal and England international star Danny Welbeck might feel a little put out about having to play second fiddle to Olivier Giroud, in the Premier League games at least, since the Frenchman returned from his lengthy injury lay off, but he doesn´t seem to be. Welbeck did not say as [.

The stats involved in this article about the Arsenal and Germany star Mesut Ozil were made before the Gunners´trip to Loftus Road to face QPR in the Premier League, so may have changed a little but not much. The German playmaker has been the subject of so many articles in the football media since he [.

Chelsea drew 1-1 against PSG tonight in their Champions League second round first leg tie in Paris with the defensive trio of John Terry, Gary Cahill and Branislav Ivanovic linking up for a brilliant opening goal.

Terry found himself down the left wing before crossing into the area where he found defensive partner Cahill who flicked the ball on to Ivanovic who headed home for a brilliantly worked goal from the most unlikely of source's in the build up.

Branislav Ivanovic has come accustomed to scoring against Aston Villa but surely this super strike was his best one and most important one as Chelsea took advantage of Manchester City's slip up today at the Etihad.

This well worked free-kick was enough for Liverpool to advance to the FA Cup Quarter-Finals at the expense of Crystal Palace.

Mario Balotelli's free-kick wasn't the best of strikes but with Sturridge and Skrtel breaking the wall or at the very least unsighting Speroni in the Palace goal who's save broke nicely for Adam Lallana to nip in!

West Brom thumped West Ham 4-0 at the Hawthorns today as they comfortably booked their spot in the FA Cup Quarter-Finals with this Super James Morrison goal the pick of the bunch struck from about 25 yards.

Roy Hodgson's soul-sapping start to life as Crystal Palace's new manager has plumbed a new depth today with news that, having lost their sole remaining striker to injury, the club are mulling over the prospect of signingCarlton Cole.

Having lost Christian Benteke to a knee ligament injury last week, Hodgson currently doesn't have a single recognised senior striker at his disposal with Connor Wickham already ruled out until January and, well.

This round's leader was DC Buzzards,with a whopping score of 173 points, 20 more than the next closest team. Captain David Villa (NYC, $11.9) tallied two goals and an assist on the way to 46 points, easily leading the team. Behind him were Red Bulls teammates Sacha Kljestan ($11.

Iker Casillas has been going down hill slowly but surely and this soft goal scored by Tiago sums his downfall up in a nutshell as Real were thumped by current LA Liga champions Atletico today in the Madrid Derby.