Dr. Patti Taylor

In this episode, Patti shines as a true genius, sharing her vast knowledge on refining and enhancing the orgasmic experience beyond the normal, even sometimes brief, experience we call regular orgasm. She compellingly integrates consciousness and pleasure into a practice that has its roots in ancient religious practices, and is also a state-of-the-art, and evolving dynamic practice.
Hear Patti define Expanded Orgasm and take us on a juicy ride as she does! Learn the two essential ingredients required to give your partner genuine, over-the-edge, Expanded Orgasms! She reveals a priceless secret: how to find the orgasmic current, a seemingly infinite state where intimacy, pleasure, and consciousness become one!
Patti shares from her rare and amazing body of research about those who engage in Expanded Orgasmic practices. Learn what astonishing benefits accrue to their bodies, minds, hearts and spirits. Learn how long it takes to begin reaping the rewards, and how likely practitioners are to continue on a genuine practice path, once they begin learning Expanded Orgasm.
She also shares heartfelt real life stories of how her work has impacted couples, women seeking to reclaim their turn-on, and even singles seeking re-enter dating again. And, share a moment of rapturous touch with Patti, which she invites all of us to try!

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Transcript

Expanded Orgasm – A Bliss Path to Orgasm, Intimacy, and Awakening

Announcer: This program, brought to you by Personal Life Media.com, is suitable for mature audiences only and may contain explicit sexual information.

[music]

Anton Diaz: Welcome to the Expanded Lovemaking Show. This is your host Anton and our guest today is Dr. Patricia Taylor. And here are some of the highlights of our show.

Dr. Patricia Taylor: ... it's new feelings in your genitals and you can just spread them throughout your body, heart and mind.

Anton Diaz: Wow.

Dr. Patti Taylor: It starts with a contact on your genitals and once it starts to feel really good. Then it gets better and better and better until it feels incredibly good, and you go over the edge.

Anton Diaz: Wow, that's a delicious piece of information for us men to know. Welcome to the Extended Lovemaking Show. I'm your host Anton, founder of Sexy Spirits in New York City. Today on the show we are talking about expanded orgasms, what they are and how they can give you the most amazingly fulfilling experiences.

Our guest today is the renowned Dr. Patricia Taylor. Dr. Taylor has taught at Sexy Spirits for many years now and I've always called her Patti. So would it be OK to call you Patti?

Dr. Patti Taylor: I'd like that.

Anton Diaz: Wonderful. Let me tell you a little bit about Patti. She's the founder of Expanded Lovemaking.com. Patti is also the innovator, developer and foremost expert in the world today on the subject of expanded orgasm.

She's the author of the best selling book, "Expanded Orgasm" and a star and a producer of a classic sex education video. She is also a master healer and a personal coach who has helped thousands of people bring more feeling, awareness, sensuality, love, passion and best of all, pleasure to their lives.

I'm pleased to have you with us today. Wow. Expanded orgasm. I think all of our listeners will want to know more about how to give and receive expanded orgasm, so don't hold back on the 2CD channel you'll be sharing with us.

On our show today we'll be defining expanding orgasm and we'll tell you how to have them. Plus we'll hear about people who've been practicing this art and the benefit that this practice has brought to them.

So today on this show I'd like to talk about what is an expanded orgasm and how it compares to a regular type of orgasm that most of us are accustomed to. How can our listeners learn to give and receive expanded orgasm and are there benefits to having an ongoing practice with expanded orgasm?

So let's start with a few questions. What is an expanded orgasm Patti, and how does it compare to a regular type of orgasm?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well Anton, most people know what a regular orgasm is and I'd say regular orgasms are pretty good so I don't mean to suggest they're not. It starts with a contact on your genitals and once it starts to feel really good.

Then it gets better and better and better until it feels incredibly good, and you go over the edge. Then, lets say a few moments later according to Masters and Johnson, six to eight contractions eight tenths of a second apart, you go down over the other side and that's the regular orgasm.

Now, in an expanded orgasm it starts to feel really good, often right away, and then you start spreading the energy and adding more sensation. Spreading that energy through your body. Spreading that energy through your abdomen and down your legs and adding more energy.

It's feeling really good. Spreading it through your arms and adding more energy. Then it's going through your heart, mind and spirit, and maybe even through into your partner. You're expanding that energy. It's just feeling better and better.

Eventually maybe you're even having a few regular orgasms inside your expanded orgasm. It's just feeling better and better. Well, that's an expanded orgasm.

Anton Diaz: So Patti, it sounds to me like expanded orgasm is actually a deeper engagement of the person that's experiencing pleasure. It's an opportunity for them to take their own sense of pleasure deeper into their awareness and consciousness.

That seems to be the emphasis more than actually what somebody is doing to them. Do I have that right Patti?

Dr. Patti Taylor: An expanded orgasm is so many different things. Technically it's just the ability to take that fabulous feeling. You have so many feelings in your genitals and you can just spread them throughout your body, heart, mind and awareness.

I mean the biggest sex organ in your body is your brain. But what happens is there are implications everywhere. It goes into your heart. You open up to love so you feel this in your heart. You feel this in your energy. It opens up dimensions in your relationship, in your relating with a partner.

It keeps shifting and changing. The people who taught this actually go back thousands of years of this profound spiritual path to awakened consciousness. This is not just how to get off better, although it's a great way to get off better.

It was actually a profound path of spiritual consciousness because it's so incredibly deep and rich. A thorough expanded orgasm has everything in it.

Anton Diaz: Wow. It sounds to me with expanded orgasm that we actually engage our consciousness and minds in a far more intimate connection with our pleasure than we do with having a multiple orgasm. It seems that we need our attention somewhat focused slightly different. Can you explain that to our audience.

Dr. Patti Taylor: You can, you can. I've had expanded quickies to be honest with you. Actually you can touch someone right away and they will have an expanded orgasm. But the thing is that an expanded orgasm is a full-being experience.

So if someone is to touch me and for me to have an expanded orgasmic experience right away, they will touch me not just in my genitals but they'll touch me everywhere all at once. They'll touch my heart, my spirit, my mind.

They'll touch my imagination, because of course I have learned how to connect myself up. That's what we teach people to do. It's a very rich experience. A lot of fun too.

Anton Diaz: The person that would be touching you would bring you into that state Patti. What would they have to know that's different?

Dr. Patti Taylor: There's two things that are very important to know to give someone an expanded orgasm as opposed to what we call a wonderful regular orgasm. Two things that really are important as a foundation. Number one, it is very important to find somebody's current.

We're just going to talk about the woman right now. Men can have expanded orgasms too, but we're just going to talk about the woman for right now. You want to find her current, that place in her genitals that feels the best.

You want to be able to latch onto that and stay there. Because to really expand her orgasm so that she can keep spreading it through her body, you want it to be a continuous experience. Remember that I said she could add and spread and add and spread.

Dr. Patti Taylor: That's a great question. The standard thinking is that for women, on their clitoris, it's about the two o'clock spot. So if a woman was a map, the top of her clit was about 12 o'clock and the bottom of her clit was about six, then her left side would be about three o'clock and her right would be nine o'clock.

About the two o'clock position is said to be where a woman's favorite spot is. It is also said that for 80 percent of women, that's where their favorite spot is. Presumably because women are right handed and that's where most women will reach over and touch themselves.

I'd say for the majority of women, if they will explore themselves, that's probably where they're the most sensitive. Of course having worked with a lot of women, I would say that there's some variation on that.

A lot of women are too sensitive. A lot of women haven't really explored that spot. A lot of women like other stuff. Of course the spot will change as a sexual date changes too. Spots get longer, they get more engorged. All kinds of fun things happen.

Anton Diaz: Wow. That's a delicious piece of information for us men to know.

Dr. Patti Taylor: They do. They get longer, they get bigger. They start out the size of a head of a pin, then they get dime sized. All sorts of things happen.

Anton Diaz: Wow. Thank you so much Patti for that answer. We're going to take a short break to support our sponsors. This is Anton and I'm with Dr. Patricia Taylor. We'll be right back.

[commercial break]

Anton Diaz: We're back. I am here with Dr. Patricia Taylor on the Expanded Lovemaking Show. Before we took our break, we were talking about that special spot on 80 percent of women where we can actually lock into their current of orgasmic delight.

With variation and consistency we can bring them to expanded orgasm. I'm not the expert here, but we're going to let the expert talk more about that. So Patti, that was really a juicy bit of information. I think our audience would love to know how we can learn to give and receive expanded orgasms.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well OK, moving right along then. There may be a lot of people already giving their partners expanded orgasms and they don't realize it. I just wanted to say in fairness probably a lot of people do lock onto their partners spots, and do some of the things that I have been describing and just haven't realized it.

Usually the people who read my books are already doing a lot of this stuff. I do talk about the locking onto the current and continuity in my book "Expanded Orgasm". That's a great place to start is in my books and videos. If you're interested, the information is out there.

Beyond that, your partner is always going to be your best teacher for you. I'm a big advocate in setting up training sessions that are separate from lovemaking, where you and your partner can have really hot, sexy, juicy learning sessions with each other.

To play and learn all kinds of great things about what you like to do with each other.

Anton Diaz: So when you say, Patti, that you can actually have sessions where you guide your partner, does that mean that a woman will actually tell the man that he's got the spot, he hasn't got the spot, that's too soft, too hard?

Is there actual communicating as we go play by play with the moment of pleasure?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yes, yes because one of the biggest impediments to learning expanded orgasm is that it's really hard for people to communicate about what they want sexually. I've been teaching this stuff for many years and I can also speak from my own experience.

I remember when I tried, before I had any of this training, to ask a guy to go lighter. I actually had to go out for dinner with him and get him plied on saki. And when we were both totally drunk I finally asked him to lighten up a little bit.

I didn't want to hurt his ego and I didn't want him to be crushed. It gets worse at these things. So we're an alternative to that. You bracket some time, you have a sandbox and you say, "What's the objective of our sandbox?"

Well, it's to communicate. It's not about love making. It's about communicating. One of my favorite games to play is actually what you just mentioned. It's called "Stop Start" or "Pause Resume". If a guy is looking to find out if he's on your current or not, that's one of them.

Then if he's on her current, then she says, "Start". Then if he goes off her current, she'll say, "Pause" until he goes on it again. Other ones might be looking for her G-spot. There's a great number of things you can do with a woman's G-spot, or you could play with her labia.

Women can do stuff with a man too. Explore what feels good to his cock or give him an expanded orgasm too. There's all kinds of fun things you can do in a sandbox.

Anton Diaz: Patti, do you ever recommend that couples masturbate in front of each other so that their partner can watch how their partner enjoys pleasing themselves? Do you ever recommend that as a kind of communication skill?

Dr. Patti Taylor: That is one of the best things that couples could do for each other. We have so much going in our culture just around sex in general, so anything that couples can do to be more intimate with one another and to understand that these things aren't always easy.

So do it. Set up a sandbox and make it special. Go out and buy some flowers, make the room look beautiful. Maybe take the whole evening and ask your woman to show you what turns her on, how she touches herself. There's an added benefit to that because then you'll find her favorite spot.

A lot of people who've been together for 25 years have never done this and never found her favorite spot. Once you find her favorite spot, you're on your way to giving your partner an expanded orgasm. This can be an amazingly fun thing to do for an evening.

Anton Diaz: Wow, that sounds like a very hot date. We're going to take a short break to support our sponsors. This is Anton and I'm with Dr. Patricia Taylor on Expanded Lovemaking. We'll be right back.

[commercial break]

Anton Diaz: We are back and I'm Anton. We are talking with Dr. Patricia Taylor about expanded orgasm. Before our break we were talking how we could communicate and set up these great sandbox dates where we could communicate with our partner exactly how to please me.

I think that's amazing that we can actually spend time with someone on a date and say, "Oh, I like it there", or "Nope, a little bit higher. Perfect". To just spend the whole night doing that, I think that's a hot turn-on date for me. Patti.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Before we go on I'd just like to say one more thing. I do think that there's one other thing that's really great to do it to take turns giving and receiving on separate evenings. It's great to do that in reverse, having an experience of just giving for a whole evening or receiving pleasure for a whole evening.

Let the woman show the man where her favorite spot is for an evening but also do it with the man. It's really good in an expanded orgasm to learn how to be a giver as it will make you a better receiver and visa versa. It's really fun to play all these great games. Just the whole thing is very educational. Go ahead.

Anton Diaz: Wow, so you're suggesting that we only dedicate one evening as a giver or receiver and then, if we're going to switch, that we do it on a separate evening.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well that's just one thing to do. Yes. It's just a fun way to learn how to be both a giver and a receiver. It's a very good practice in expanded orgasm because a better giver is a better receiver. They will understand both better.

Anton Diaz: Well, that certainly takes it out of the regular way that we're accustomed to enjoying sex with one another, where we kind of place these expectations on making sure that both of us are pleased. That's a tough one most of the time.

[laughing]

Anton Diaz: Patti, I would like to ask you, because I'm sure you yourself have been practicing this for a long time, but I would also love to hear stories about couples you've taught who've continued this as an ongoing practice of expanded orgasm. Can you tell us a little about those experiences and those benefits, when you can engage in expanded orgasm as a regular practice in one play?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Absolutely. Well in my PhD survey I interviewed 44 people, 22 men and 22 women. The results were astonishing. Whether you were a man or a woman, whether you had studied expanded orgasm for a long time - ten years or more- or had just started, you got the same benefit.

You were able to tap into your natural genius, you have more pleasure in your life, more increase in energy, you were able to give your lover intense pleasure. I mean there are incredible benefits.

You get more energy, awareness, feel more love, more connectiveness to the divine, just in addition to it being so much more fun. Needless to say, there are huge benefits.

Anton Diaz: Can you tell us about some of the couples that you've worked with and the feedback you've gotten from them and maybe you've continued to coach them. How has it changed their lives?

Dr. Patti Taylor: Absolutely. Going into this practice is definitely like entering a new path in life. Just recently I got a phone call from this couple I worked with about two years ago. I worked with them for about a week.

At the time they had just sold their company, they had some kids and they were really stressed out. I don't think that a week is a long period of time at all. They were having problems and very stressed out. After a week I didn't hear from them until I got this phone call.

They are now making love every day of their lives. They called and said that every day is getting better and more amazing. We're finding more and more love. I just smiled because I know that's the way it is. Welcome to the club!

I felt so great because that's what happens to people who really get it. "You guys are really there." That was really beautiful. I especially love it when people with families really find a way to solidify their relationship. That happens so much, that people in relationships renew their love through this path.

Especially when they've been together for a long time like they had.

Anton Diaz: Wow, that's a dramatic story about a couple who sound like they had it all and now it sounds like they have a lot more.

[laughing]

Dr. Patti Taylor: Then there was the couple where the woman was going through menopause and had a breast cancer where she had to stop taking estrogen. She was really feeling sad because she lost her sex drive. Her husband was just coming into some power.

They came into me for one visit. After just watching them, I asked, "Have you shifted the angle of your finger and tried this and this differently?" And in some way he was just touching her stomach differently, and all of a sudden he connected with her current.

She was just out of her mind. She said, "Oh my God, this is like a one in a million orgasm of a lifetime!" All night long she just said, "Oh my God, you're blowing my mind!" This woman was like a teenager, a tiger. He blew her mind.

She said, "I don't need estrogen". That kind of healing that comes, it was so beautiful.

Anton Diaz: How about experiences of single people?

Dr. Patti Taylor: This isn't just for married people either. There was a widower who had been out of the market for 40 years. He was a recent widower and wanted to start dating again, but was very shy.

He came to me for some expanded lovemaking lessons, which is just learning how to connect. On the second lesson he just got it. He had learned very fast with expanded lovemaking that expanded lovemaking is an instantaneous learning.

He was so turned on and he so got it, that he actually left the session early. He ran out the door so he could practice with people, making love with people that he met on the street. And we live in a good neighborhood so it was safe and everything.

He's not that shy anymore. He was that motivated that he just ran out the door. I actually think that he was going to start practicing in the grocery store, the checkout counter. But he was that excited to go out and start making love.

That's it. He got it. This is typical of people that understand expanded lovemaking.

Anton Diaz: Well, we're almost out of time, but I would like to ask you one final question Patti. How did you ever come about to teach expanded lovemaking and expanded orgasm? I think that's a fascinating story in itself.

Dr. Patti Taylor: How did I come about teaching expanded lovemaking? After my book came out, "Expanded Orgasm" in 2002, I had rush of people that wanted expanded orgasm classes. I really couldn't start teaching everybody expanded orgasm for obvious reasons.

I was thinking what I should do now? It occurred to me that there was so much what we do in expanded orgasm that really doesn't have to do with the genitals. It has to do with how we touch someone, who we are when we're present with someone.

The physical technique is only 25 percent of an expanded orgasm. The other 75 percent is spiritual, mental and emotional. I can teach that and there's a huge need for that. So I created this day long course in preparation for other courses in the expanded orgasm.

It was another reason to do it too, because I was teaching some expanded orgasm. I thought I needed to prepare these people. So I created this course for both reasons. I'll give you an example. Do you have a moment?

Anton Diaz: Absolutely.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Yes?

Anton Diaz: Yes.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Here's an example. This is something I call "Touch for Rapture". Take a breath in, and then out. Just begin to feel your whole being. Now imagine this is going to be a "Touch for Rapture", that you're going to touch your partner but you're going to just touch your own arm.

You're just going to pretend that you're touching someone. I want you to touch this arm with the sensitivity, astonishment, delight and amazement of someone who is touching the velvet or the cheek of a sweet little child or baby.

Someone who's really soft like the petals of a rose. Feel the delicate little hairs, maybe the beauty of the delicate skin. Maybe even feel through to the person underneath. As you feel, you want to relax your arm because when you relax, that's when all the feeling really flows through.

It's our tension on ourselves and our tension that keeps us from feeling. So when we really relax and open our hearts, we can really feel. Just really touch that person. You can't just touch with your hand. You want to touch from your mind, heart, body and spirit.

Touch cuts across all of that. Just touch slowly. As you touch, give yourself permission to feel the rapture in that touch. It's an allowance that you give yourself, a joy. Wow. That feels great.

I ask people when we're in classes, "How much do you allow yourself to feel that rapture when you touch someone. How much pleasure do you get and will you get next time you touch someone you love, even if it's just a touch?"

I invite people who take my classes, and maybe the listeners, to go home and give a hug, and allow themselves to let the rapture flow through them. It's something we do for ourselves, to just do this.

When we can feel this kind of joy and rapture, that's the same kind of feeling that we can learn to touch with all the way through to the same kind of touching we use in expanded orgasm. That's how I got started teaching expanded lovemaking.

Anton Diaz: Wow, I'm in a state of rapture right now.

[laughing]

Anton Diaz: Your words are beautiful and so incredibly soothing. Patti, I want to thank you for joining us, sharing your wisdom, insight, and most of all your wonderful gift that you bring to the world.

Dr. Patti Taylor: Well, it's been a pleasure Anton. Thanks so much for having me on your show.

Anton Diaz: Please join us next week on Expanded Lovemaking. That brings us to the end of the show. Thank you for listening. For text and transcripts of this show and other shows on Personal Life Media, please visit our web site at www.personallifemedia.com. This is your host Anton, your Expanded Lovemaking host from the heart of New York City.