Masterchef Australia – Matt Moran Bootcamp Or Was It A Wet T-Shirt Competiton?

by Reality Raver

I am still stunned that in the Matt Moran basic bootcamp challenge there were still people saying to camera “I have not made mayonnaise by hand before” or had not cut up a whole chicken. Seriously wouldn’t they be just some of the things you might practice before going on a cooking show? Particularly the mayo as every year, in every competitive cooking show there is always the judges cracking it if people don’t make their own.

At least everyone had peeled potatoes before, well except for Gemma, who cut herself with a peeler early on in proceedings. I hope it was nerves not incompetence.

The Matt Moran boot camp were three basic skills tests, chopping potatoes into 2 kilos of chips, making mayonnaise, and segmenting a chicken. The bottom five of each challenge were then in a scone cook off. They were paying for the season two balls up of the CWA challenge.

It is great Matt Moran has a permanent position on masterchef particularly if we are going to see him in wet t-shirts. That was a quality viewing experience. However he also does bring levity to proceedings, as George Calombaris does get a bit excitable.

Also props must go to Rachael the 45 year old admin assistant from WA, who in two nights has managed to manhandle Adriano Zumbo, and lay a kiss on Matt Moran. High five girl.

By the time Heston Blummenthal has a guest appearance she will have him in the pantry inhaling nitrous oxide bulbs.

I note next time Matt had to deal with her he stuck his hand out, and she sheepishly said to him she would resist the urge to kiss him. Clearly Matt is not into cougars.

Alex the machinist is right it is good to be in the elimination challenges as he said I have cooked three times most have only cooked once. He has ensured that he has received the most screen time over the last 2 nights and therefore most of the online chatter. He is THE recognisable face of Season 3 Masterchef.

Apart from the cut finger, nothing really dramatic occurred in the three basic skills test. Apart for the rockabilly girl, Danielle Dixon, from Brisbane saying she was going to segment the chicken Matt Moran’s way. Well that WOULD be the smart thing to do, as why else was he demonstrating how to do it.

The elimination challenge was a scone challenge with five to be eliminated.

“You got to get it right, other wise it is not going to work out, and you will have rock cakes.” Hayden the professional life guard said, proving my theory that it is difficult to have a six pack and a high IQ.

Tanja Binggeli the opera language coach was poking was touching her scone mixture like it was a corpse. Her scones looked shocking and she blubbered whilst she was being eliminated.

But she was at least given some air time unlike Craig Pedrola who did not even get a line on camera.

Cindy Harrington, and Elizabeth Hallam were a tad luckier. However I must ask who was the fifth person eliminated, as there are five brunettes with long hair in the house that look exactly the same.

At the moment it is hard to know who is going to get the good and bad edits from the producers. However Alex and Kate Bracks must be happy with the coverage they have got thus far. Rachael is going to be divisive with the audience, and Sun well I suspect she is the first villain of the season.

I only know Alex, Rachel – yes, you go girl – checked out Alana cos someone posted she is annoying. They are right. Am aware of that cartoon character panel beating business manager who wants to be a qualified chef – get an effing apprenticeship – and the blubbering one.
Yes, am soooo glad Matt Moran is a perm judge. And, what is with the dangerously wet floor?

While I’m not complaining about the Moran wet T-shirt opportunity, I wish they’d just stop these outdoor challenges. Yeah, you can pan and it’s more dramatic but as a viewer I think it’s nonsense: we know you can fit them all indoors, just do it already. It’s not like a big lawn is all that scenic.

As for the eliminations, I fast-forwarded through some of the inane interviews but I think I gathered that one of them works in a cafe that serves scones. If I’m right, wonder how she got up the nerve to walk back into work after being eliminated and tell everyone…

And really: chocolate desserts, chips, cutting up a chicken, mayonnaise – if they’re out of their depth on these, how the heck do they expect to progress? Hard to believe some of them have ever watched the show before as they seem to be under the impression that they’ll just be able to float through doing only the things they’re good at and have experience cooking. *sigh*

I’ve really lost the love for MC and it’s only episode 2. MM was great though – do like the description somewhere of he and Geo being the bald brothers. They do have a good rapport. They’re a bit like those wacky Stefanovic brothers.

Yes enough of that wet floor and the outdoor challenge. I only wish it had poured with rain for the first task…would have loved to see them all cooking in the rain.

The tears were painful…that was excruciating when Tanja blubbered and choked over her scones. I thought we were promised the Johnson & Johnson no more tears formula this year.

I’m watching Australia’s Got Talent tomorrow night…never watched it before but can’t resist the promo with the 14 year old bloke singing Whitney and getting that alarming kiss from Delta’s ex.

Sigh… I wish they’d just skip to the top 24 and be done with it. I suppose starting with a top 50 is meant to make us feel that the people who made it really had to fight for it, but it’s just too many people – how am I supposed to care about people who aren’t even given a line of dialogue (or monologue, even) in the entire show before they’re booted? Heck, I can bet you all right now that there’ll be people who will make the top 24 who’ll only get a couple of lines, if they’re lucky, for the next month (anyone remember Adam from the first few weeks of last season’s Masterchef? Besides the pizza debacle, you probably don’t since they never showed him until later in the series).

Maybe they should spend the first week giving extended bios on the top 24 instead, so we know something about them beyond their usual 1 minute audition video blurb. At least that way, I might care when they appear to be heading for the exit.

That Tanja chick was driving me nuts, barely poking at her scone dough. It was worse than watching Aaron knead his like bread dough last year. I know NOTHING about cooking but even I know how to bake a bloody scone! Won’t be missing you or your blubberring Tanja.
Can’t wait for tonight’s episode when some bloke clearly comes to the table with no dish. I was saying the other day when Alex made his raw meatballs that I’d have gone to the judges with nothing rather than that! Good move by this bloke.
And I’m all for more camera time for Alex 😉

Agree it was a boring episode. We are surprised by the number who seem to be ignorant of past challenges in MC. Perhaps they all need to be sent the MC strategy posting. Instead of working through Heston’s cookbook perhaps work through the MC recipes.

Seems to be a surfeit of admin assistants(and variation on that title) this year.

Sad to see opera language coach go. Think the producers missed the merchandising opportunities she presents. Not limited to the cookbook but a compilation opera CD to join Matt’s MC1 offering as well as a scone poker.

“Not limited to the cookbook but a compilation opera CD to join Matt’s MC1 offering as well as a scone poker.”
I noticed you didn’t mention Julie Goodwin’s musical offering. Is that because you’re trying to wipe it from your mind or were you lucky enough to have blinked and missed it?

Loving the dirges played in the background while there’s a cull in progress. They must have a library full of that faux Jaws music to pad these eliminations out with.

Alex’s journey is just beginning as far as his ears go. I thought about him this morning when I saw this dude in JB Hi Fi with stretchers in his lugs that were the diameter of tennis balls. Why would you go out of your way to look like Prince Charles?

Only two episodes down and I’ve learned so much…about ear piercing.

I’ll tip a hat trick of crying tonight. They’re allegedly toning down the crying but just so viewers didn’t miss Tanja’s blub ,the producers threw in a quick preview of said blub before the ad. Then it was reprised in all of it’s overblown glory.

Would have liked to see the wannabes make scones on a wood stove like the good old days….I’ll bet Irmgaard could have $hat the scone challenge in.

It’s pretty demeaning, not that Ma$terchef cares to have these wankers running like a pack of meerkats to get at the ingredients.

The mindless hi fiving and copious handshakes are setting new standards in infection control. Onya Ma$terchef…all about the cooking.

Another great recap. Nothing much to say except it’s a dull and boring episode. Its more fun to read the recap here than watching the episode. Possibly because not a big fan of Matt Moran. Manu Feildel in a wet t-shirt. That would be a different story.

There’s a few contestants whose recipes are featured in the latest MC magazine which would suggest they make it to top 24. ( I mean really, why would they feature top 50 contestants’ recipes who they didn’t think good enough to make the final cut?) Fingers crossed it isn’t necessarily so. But hang on, I’m not watching this anymore remember…

Next year’s basic skills test will have to involve making mashed potatoes…though come to think of it didn’t the do that last year for the returnees basic skills test? Well, considering it’s only Top 50, maybe they should just get them to cook a potato. No time limit, but last five get immediately eliminated.

Have just perused the web and discovered to my surprise Lobe is considered ‘hot’. Hmm… His shining face pops up every couple of minutes so I best get used to his presence. Maybe they could, for the sake of decency and those who may be eating dinner, pixilate his lobes?

This is a slow dreary way to start the thing. I’m ready for the finale already. The only one I really want to see in the final 24 is Greg the leatherman looking guy with the mo.

Much as I don’t want to kill the baby while it’s in the crib, so far the golden goose that is Ma$terchef is looking a bit sick. The show will be lucky to win a gold turd next year if this is all there is.

Alex might as well put out a book on ear piercings now ,he’s getting more coverage than Osama bin Laden’s elimination.
I’ve tried ,but it’s hard to hate him. He’s obviously cruised through life on that smile but in the twinkling of an eye he goes to the rabbit in the headlights look when things go awry…ie the burning sugar bag, dropped cake confrontation with George.

Sorry to say it, but this season of Masterchef is boring, boring & more boring. What barrel did they find this lot of contestants in? They certainly scraped the bottom. Can’t use a vege peeler or make scones !!! Eeeek. Makes me wonder how terrible the rejects were. Eliminate the lot & find a new bunch or I’ll eliminate myself as a viewer.

No need for a stretcher BDD. Apparently it was so long, they invented the Price Albert piercing to tie it to his leg so it wouldn’t go all flopping around for all to see. Surely the invention of jockeys would have bee n more practical and far less painful.
Culinary Boner – you are brave indeed. I saw you lurking in THAT thread LOL!! You stick your head in there you might get it bitten off by a rabid Altihead. I’m commenting on it in this thread because I don’t want to throw any more fuel on the fire. It’s like Lord Of The Flies in there 😉

Oh and I forgot to say BDD – I hadn’t realised what a comedy of errors Alex had been so far. I must have been dazzled by the cute smile, but he really is turning out to be more dangerous in the kitchen than Fingerless Jake last year. But I liked him as well…