I sent it to my wife, because she is supportive of my Aneros Journey and curious about how to achieve what I am searching for. She asked me to post here about how she can use the principles in that link and what for her to achieve a full body O? She read the article but said that while we focus on our P-Spot she didn't understand what she is supposed to do? Does she focus on her G-Spot? Is there a device that does for her what the P massagers do for her? I showed her the EVI she read about it and wondered if it really worked the same as the male devices do?

She really showed interest and I was stumped quite frankly because our P spot experiences are really quite passive.

I wanted to comment on Evi. I've been a user of her for some time now and yes, she is a g-spot stimulator. I've had a great experience with Evi. I believe others from what I have been told have had similar experiences. I would state that for a woman finding some time to unwind and spend time with the device without pressure and to have a good understanding of one's body and how it responds to stimuli would be a must. This does not vibrate. I found that it affords an enhancement of one's kegel muscles by it's usage. Which is a win win for sex and gspot stimulation.

If anyone understands taboo it would be myself Ha! I could tell you stories about the upbringing I had as a child and teenager. I really don't think as Evi as anything less than something for me. It certainly helps tremendously with tightening the muscles in the pelvic region. Many women. If not ALL will have an issue with this in their life. Pelvic floor weakness is a major cause of incontinence. This us noted after childbirth and as we age. So a perk for Evi is that one can use this device and strengthen those muscles much like doing kegels. Evi fits well in the vagina and contours in a way that fits tightly. I've found I have longer and stronger orgasms after having used Evi. Do I always have a gspot orgasm. No. But there's been some added bliss in my life . So talk it over with your wife. The plus of caring for herself and the other benefits are a plus.

@nurselady She doesn't want to join, she is not an interenet joiner. She asked me to inquire about how to use the EVI??? The technique? Does she just do Kegels? Do the Kegels produce any pleasure like what men experience from using prostate massagers? Do women have to take the extended time that men do at Aneros use? She said she wouldn't have the time or patience to "meditate" for over an our using it.

I hope I can offer some insight. In effect, follow the directions that come with Evi. I've found that the experience is best when there's little or no distraction. It's hard to realize what subtle changes or to allow yourself to be sexual with children or life activities on the other side of the door.

Lube is good, unless you find you are wet down there already. Your question about kegels is exact. Evi is about finding a motion that works for you. I would state it's like kegels. I find a rhythmic contraction that pushes Evi to the gspot area is the attraction one is working towards. Kegels help with the musculature of a woman and Evi allows that as well. However, I would state one should allow themselves time for this to be more familiar and comfortable. I do not believe it comes easily for every person and I feel that is much like the prostate massagers.

I've found that I an squeeze Evi with my muscles and hold it, maybe even work it as a pulsating action. Maybe the position of use can be a welcome change - such as on one's side, back or all fours?

The effect is not instantaneous for me. It's not vibrating, so there's no AHHHHH- for instant gratification. But, what occurs with the right stimulation and moment is something I can achieve on my own. Having a partner to share with may be an added plus. I hope your wife does allow herself some time and patience for Evi's use.

I have been able to achieve an orgasm from using Evi. In fact, many times I've had a squirting orgasm with Evi. This kind of orgasm is a full body orgasm and can be very intense.

@xtimedt69 I think you have hit the nail on the head. Males seem to have a narrow field of vision. Females have a much wider angle of vision. They have so many things to do that to put aside an hour and say a half to meditate for 'she spot' work is out of the question for most. My partner says this is so. And at night sleep is the priority. For males it is sex and work, work is for financing sex. This is a bit of an over statement. Females have to consider family, and homemaking for a family, security in which to raise a family. It has to be part of their nature for the survival of the human race. So males need to be careful to not expect their partner to have the same narrow focus motivation.I hope this came out right.

@nurselady@isvara Our children are grown and out of the house we have them by the age of 20 so all is well. When i started this Aneros journey she was supportive and curious and it opened a dialouge about sex, fantasy, expectations etc. We set aside time each night to talk about these things and she guards that time. She has seen a difference in me in a number of ways that she likes and in us as a couple.

So ... About a month ago, she has what she calles "homework" every week on her day off she takes about an hour and a half to herself for self exploration. The she teases me about it and we text each other. I sent her links regarding the whole body orgasm and she is curious about exploring that route.

I am going to share @nurselady comments and see if she has any other questions. But this morning she was asking about ordering the EVI. So we shall see.

@isvara you are correct, she said she is unable to enjoy the "homework" at all until she completes the tasks and goals she has set for her day off.

The other day I was planning a session for me when I got an email for me to do a job, I proceeded with my session but having that job on my mind created quite a bit of mind noise for me and the session wasn't very good. So we too have our issues.

@ineverknew I am incredibly luck. She is a very special lady and I don't take her for granted.

Just wanted to chime in that even though I am male, I am so thrilled to see this sort of dialog start to happen with women and the EVI. Thank you Nurselady for having the courage to put yourself out there in explaining this. Hopefully this will encourage more women to participate and ask questions, even if through their partners.

@nurselady She read your response and it made sense, ordered EVI today. She said she understand she must be patient. We shall see. She was looking at the Luna Beads too.

Her EVI came on Thursday and she took a look at it, read the instructions and then put it on the dresser. I told here if she expects fireworks I don't think that will happen. I am going to simply leave it alone and see what happens. When she has an orgasm it is intense and lasts 30-45 seconds and then she is fulfilled and in a state (if you know what I mean), my orgasms are also intense but last about 7-10 seconds. They are good but I always thought it was a rip-off given the anticipation.

Aneros allows the pleasure for me to last longer and has improved the duration and intensity of my orgasms with her.

Now given where she is now, perfectly satisfied .... I am uncertain if she can see the benefits of the time it takes to get the EVI to do what it is supposed to do.

I would add for backgound that while she has always enjoyed sex and rarely ever has turned it down, she is perfectly satisfied if we did it the same way every time. I am the one who changes it up and I have always been the one who drives the change and experimentation. She will readily admit that. You hear about frustrated women who have men who get in a rut, I have always avoided that, I have always been sensitive to us not getting in a rut and trying to create fun and mystery.

She will enjoy and accept the change, but if it didn't happen she wouldn't care. Damndest thing.

I recently broke the news to my beautiful wife about me using the aneros. She took it quite well considering all the taboo surrounding this topic and she is actually starting to become quite curious about it and wants to be part of my journey. I am thinking on getting her the EVI but there is barely any information or feedback about it. So I was wondering if there is anyone out there who's been on the same situation as me that could give me a better idea of how good the EVI is and what it's like to have joint sessions with your wife.

Sounds like you have the right approach; to facilitate self-discovery for your wife vs. forcing it. Good on you for giving this a whirl! With respect to your wife's attitude, if you could add in there a receptivity for new things, you would have covered most of the elements for what we often describe as the necessary mindset for Aneros exploration!

If you ever do find her interest dwindling you might entertain the muscle toning aspects of the device. This feature will pay large dividends in other areas of your sex life (with more traditional pursuits) and will increase the likelihood of breakthroughs on the G-spot orgasm front. Stay with it!

I think most people in a long term relationship may fall into a rut in their sexuality. I was in a marriage that I thought totally was fulfilling. We divorced after nearly 25 years. However, I found because of my religious background, lack of what's out there in the terms of toys and simply other ideas I had a new learning curve. I'm a private person and not way out there. But, I would venture to say I've learned a lot about myself over time. Perhaps you and your wife can pull Evi out of that drawer and incorporate her in play. Years ago I found I wanted to tighten those muscles "down there." Many women after childbirth or with aging find such a need. Evi should be marketed for this need especially! Toning up those muscles is a help toward better sex, but as well a help towards good musculature to ward off other issues as women age. This is a win win situation. Along the way your wife may find other pleasures. :) What a wonderful husband she has to be searching for new means of discovery for the both of you. Congrats!

@ B Mayfield @nurselady I was wondering how to encorporate EVI in our activity. But she doesn't like "Thrusting" toys. She has a Rabbit vibe and she puts it in one plave and she kind of just slowlt moves against that spot. I know it is her G spot, the little top part gets her clit and she likes the beads roatating. She will have a massive orgasm and after she wants a hard pounding finish. I am happy she enjoys it and she gets a lot out of it and I enjoy watching her. I would like our sex activities to last a bit longer. LOL!

On her days off and on the weekends we often will take an hour siesta, usualy we read a book for about 20-25 minutes then kind of close our eyes. I really meditate, she will go to sleep. Lately I have been incorporating my aneros in these sessions because the muscle tone is getting oncredible She has indicated an inclination for using it then. We shall see.

I am so touched by your email. Truly what a lucky woman she is to have someone that cares and loves her. Wow !An idea for togetherness may be to insert Evi. Possibly in reverse and you could do your magic on her clitoris with your hand or oral? It is a tight fit for me so I feel full (does that make any sense to you?). So maybe she can squeeze down on it at the same time.

Play around with it. I welcome YOUR feedback. It's wonderful for you to be so caring towards your wife. She's a lucky lady.

Sorry to see that your religious upbringing contributed to your sexual repression or naivete; there are many conservative churchs out there that have very sexual married couples in them, and it's preached from the pulpit. Most people don't know it, but the Puritans knew of and did sexual exploits with their spouse that would make Hugh Hefner blush. Puritans were HORNY!!! I pray that you find a husband that will love you and fulfill your sexual needs as all should have fulfilled.

That said, my wife complains that hers is too big and long; we tried it the other day, and she barely got it in before she started complaining about it touching the wrong spots. I know that if she would give it a chance, she'd enjoy it like I enjoy my Aneros products and use it every chance she could get. She just needs to either work through some of her discomfort or be more sexually aroused before inserting it. I would like her to try doing light chores around the house with it under her panties, but that's as likely as Santa coming for a visit in June.

Any helpful advice on how to get past these obstacles would be a GREAT help. Please, PLEASE, someone get a Thread or Forum for the EVI going!

@ xtimedt69 thank you sir for your nice comments. My beginning with Anerios is actually years old. I started this in the beginning while searching for something to spice up our own sex life. He was extremely closed minded and refused any idea of Aneros. It really wasn't his closed mind that was the problem, it was his lack of honesty and other women. March forward and I turned to the forum again in search of assistance for a couple living two doors down and in a situation that reslly needed assistance. Bring a nurse, people often feel comfortable sharing any medical issue or detail with me. But in my back pocket I knew about the forum and turned here for other men's guidance. What better place for a mans opinion. Right?There have been other women in the forum from time to time. Zane Blue used to post here often. She and I pmd on occasion. She has had TV appearances and written a book. I tried the Gyne Flex that she promotes to tone pelvic muscles. It was okay - first looks are funny as it looks similar to a clothespin. Lol it was a good "first".

The Evi is smooth and I promise no pinching from usage.

@ Badger- thanks for you comments. I am in the "small" side in this area myself. It is a full feeling for me, but never painful. I would make sure she's using some form of lube for insertion. As for it touching the wrong spots I'm unsure what she may be referring. Originally I tried it lying in my back with insertion and with my legs slightly spread. The bigger "arm" fits in the vagina and the smaller arm lies between the vulva against the clitoris. When doing the kegels and squeezing, the smaller arm can rub or pivot against the clit. One plus is Evi can get wet - maybe she can use it in the bathtub? If she has a certain question I hope I can help. Nurselady

It's wonderful you are having discussions like this in your relationship. I applaud you. Now I must flee the forum for awhile. My daughter is threateningly my iPhone if I don't finish making chicken and dumplings. I need to scoot and play mom.

I have been asked a question by a wife concerning how are you certain you are doing kegels correctly? This really is very simple. First, when doing kegels it is much like when you are sitting on the toilet and you start and stop urinating. It's that set of muscles used.

However, I would just get to the nitty gritty here and be very specific. Many women may not be aware how they are doing kegels. Sure you can squeeze ones muscle parts and believe - yep I'm doing it.

Get familiar with yourself. I would suggest slipping one's finger in your vagina and doing a kegel. When you squeeze, notice if the muscles all around your finger tighten. If not, then concentrate on squeezing those particular ones that you seemed to not recognize. This may take some practice. Using Evi is where this can become useful. Allowing you to become familiar with your own anatomy is a plus. A goal is to feel all the muscles tighten around your finger on all sides. Years ago I thought I was doing kegels. But I learned I truly was not using all those muscles I had down there. After some conscious effort and a little practice it's an easy learning curve. Awhile later you can actually choose and squeeze perhaps just the right or left side or lower/upper vagina muscles individually. Whoever thought you'd be "working out" these muscles as if you'd be at the gym lifting weights? It's kinda the same!

I was asked the effects of this on sex? Well, the area has in a sense "traction" from the tightness of the muscles that can be an increased sensation. Or maybe your significant other can appreciate the sensation of feeling your muscles tighten around him at your control during play?

@nurselady I read her your post, she was very interested and said she would take your advice. Here is an aside .... but I think still related. When I stimulate her G-Spot, she becomes super aroused, she starts to pant, and she is moving her pelvis, at this point I don't even have to move my finger tip, but then when it reaches a certain point (suspect the orgasm point) she makes me stop. I think that is the point over which she would reach that whole body experience. I asked her a couple of times about it, but she just avoided the question.

I am rather puzzled.

@nurselady I must add, that often before she uses the EVI or takes a "break" in the afternoon on her day off, she will text me and tease me .... afterward it is as if she is embarrased about it. Do women get this feeling? I know guys sometimes do a little bit.

@ bigguy- agreed@xtimedt69- I can only tell you about my experience and I believe it may reflect other women as well. I thought I knew all there was to sex. Once upon a time i Married my high school sweetheart and was married 25 years. I was comfortable with our relationship. It was only after the demise of the marriage and someone else entered my life that I found I wasn't as experienced or knowledgeable as I thought. My first toy EVER was a Progasm. Given to me and explained that by myself and in private I might use it and have gspot stimulation. Somewhere in the forum I've seen this mentioned. Luckily for me, on my first try I had a squirting orgasm. I was by myself without pressure and this was the beginning if a learning curve. Over time I trusted this person more. The situation was never stressed. It was a most caring situation and over time he used his fingers and I learned he could bring me to a gspot orgasm. Partly, I had a prior knowledge or feeling for it. But, having a gspot orgasm for me is allowing total surrender to another and of myself. Does it happen each time? No. But the sensation is a total body orgasm. It lasts longer than a clitoral orgasm and its harder and stronger. Some women are concerned about mess. I've learned to avoid soaking of sheets that a good supply of towels down there to absorb anything is a necessity. Personally, I love to watch him ejaculate. I love giving him pleasure more than receiving. I know my body's response is a boost for him as well. This is something we do together. So if mess holds her back who cares? Sheets wash and so will the towels. Or, maybe in the bathtub- as another option?

So, maybe some alone time for your wife may help. I was given the opportunity to "have fun with this and see where it takes you. "

As for the reading? I'm uncertain why she's embarrassed. I'd love it! I call it love language. Maybe send her some texts as well. Tell her how you Feel about them. Some people love hearing affirming responses and sweet messages. It may help set the mood for her in your absence or your arrival home. I think sometimes we forget how our relationships first began. Relationships change and evolve with time.

Have I ever been embarrassed or ashamed? Certainly. You've no clue. Ha. But it's a product of my own issues. How I was raised etc.

"...she becomes super aroused,..... but then when it reaches a certain point (suspect the orgasm point) she makes me stop. I think that is the point over which she would reach that whole body experience. I asked her a couple of times about it, but she just avoided the question."

Xtimedt69,

One possible explanation may be that some women experience a sensation of needing to urinate shortly before a G-spot orgasm. Of the 3 women that I've known that had G-spot orgasms this was the case with two of them. In one instance I encouraged my partner to go over the edge with this feeling. The third person experienced a surging sensation that she was previously unfamiliar with deep in her rectum.

As nurselady said, having this type of orgasm calls for really opening and surrendering yourself to the experience without worry or concern. That's a difficult place to go to for some people. Adequate preparation can facilitate this to some degree. Having towels underneath your partner and more at the ready can eliminate concerns about bedding. Relaxation is another key. To to let loose, you need to be a little loosened up to begin with. A nice hot bath or shower, followed by a massage of her body can often do the trick. Next, G-spot orgasms are best attempted with an aroused partner, so begin with some form of foreplay that she enjoys.

In any case, proper communication is a must. Ask your wife if she is having a sense of holding back at a certain point or if this is about an unpleasant sensation. You might ask her if she's feeling like she needs to pee at any time while you're massaging her G-spot. If this is so, explain to her that it is a common experience and that she needn't worry about it in any case as you will be prepared for anything!

@B Mayfield Oh she is aroused by that point no doubt about it. We usually have a hot shower an Often start with long kissing and physical touching before it ever gets to that. The Gspot stimulation is only after significant oral stimulation. I think you are more correct that she feels like she is about to pee. I have explained to her about that sensation and I have also read that a woman needs to push then rather than suck up so to speak.

@nurselady Women can use a Progasm in the vagina and get something out of it? In reading all over this forum I never heard that! Hmmmm

Thanks Brian for adding your comments. I just can't think of it all. lol

Yes, the sensation of peeing or concern how a partner may view this is dirty, nasty or wrong can be a concern. I suppose if I remember back to the first time, I think I may have been concerned of what if I peed? If you think back as a child we are taught to be potty trained and some of these factors aren't done in bed. It's not the same, but it is likened to it. It's just improper in one's mind.

I'm unsure what you mean by "push." I don't make myself do anything (push) during these moments. For me, it's really more about relaxing and allowing myself the opportunity for someone to help me. It's a most trusting experience and yes, surrending is exactly the word for it.

Progasm - yep, it was my first gspot experience. But, yes it was manually moving it and it just happened! I know I've seen mention of this in the forum. I believe it was that it was sold in some stores such as Babeland or some such store and found that women were using the Progasm for this reason. I think the mention may have been by BF Mayfield I cannot navigate this forum as well as Rumel and BF Mayfield. Perhaps they can locate that thread or he can post on it further.

Thank you for your honest and generous sharing of information for the benefit of other women visiting this site in search of such information for their own use. I am sure having a female discuss the use and benefits of this newest Aneros device (EVI) will have significantly greater impact than a hundred men trying to explain things through their gender restricted vision. I hope other women will join with you in developing a robust presence here on this Forum for the understanding and benefit of us all.

@nurselady so last night I asked her again about why she stops me during Gspot stimulation. After all this time she said "It just gets too intense and I want to F^&K!" Can't argue with that!!!! Now can I? LOL!

The point is fulfillment. I showed her the Progasm and she is interested. Discovery is fun

@xtimedt69 - i can see how it may feel overwhelming. Perhaps something she may try is concentration on her breathing. I've never given this much thought. But, I think I'm more in tune with allowing him to take me to that place. If she can trust you with this feeling such as in you offering her oral sex - that she's dependent on you for this gratification-maybe that's a way to think of it? To hang in there as there's something to be gained or obtained. You've really made me stop and think on this one! Geesh. But I believe I concentrate on breathing and again surrendering myself to my partner. Does that help?Btw, remember the germ factor between your Progasm and something she would use in her girl parts. Yes, discovery can be fun.

@nurselady The other night I was paying attention and I noticed that when she gets aroused her breathing gets shallow and like a panting. We have talked about breathing, but during the heat of the moment that sometimes slips out the window.

I am highly aware of the "Germ" factor and careful. I must preface this with I am not really all that interested in porn, but have been exposed to it. The trend of ass to vagina and ass to mouth is rather disgusting and dangerous. I fear that people will get that it is safe women will be getting sick.

Update .... I stopped talking about it and she has pretty much abandoned the EVI. I think women want something more active. I wonder if Aneros put a small vive in the clit area or some sort of active Gspot stimulator if this product might not be more popular?

@xtimedt69 - I wonder if this is more a cultural, sexual, and gender training issue, on top of learning a new technique, in that a lot of women expect to just lay there and let the man be the active partner and bring her to orgasm. I suspect that the EVI may break a lot of stereotypes for what a woman has to do with it compared to traditional masturbation and sex, just like the prostate massager's have for men.

This is purely speculation on my part. But it seems to make sense. Some women can have just as difficult a time learning to discover G-spot orgasms as some men can learning to have super-O's through prostate stimulation. Much like we hear on this forum all the time of prostate massager newbies saying they've tried it a few times and feel nothing, I've read and heard from various women that G-spot stimulation does nothing for them. There is so much variation in peoples sexual response from person to person. Hence even on these forums for men we see several different approaches that men take to achieve super-O's.

I'd bet that for some women the EVI will require some commitment to regular sessions for a while to figure it out, if even to feel much of anything. Strong parallels to what we men experience with the prostate massager's.

Almost a month ago now I had a serious discussion with my wife about my, often joked about, interest and indeed like of anal stimulation and how i was interested in experimenting with a prostate massage device. As I suspected my wife was indeed supportive and interested. It was a huge relief actually.

Anyway, this morning my wife joked she needed a device like my Aneros to exercise her pelvic floor etc. She has been loathe to go for a jog with our daughter because, in her words, it feels like she might either wet pants or her innards feel like they are about to drop out!.

I then mentioned that i might surprise her with the Evi for her upcoming birthday....as an extra little side present. She didn't say no....

Appreciate any points in the right direction if there are other toys better than the Evi?

@4onthefloor, Lelo Luna balls are also helpful. My partner finds Evi a bit big at the moment. 50shades of grey seemed to get the Luna type balls out into the public. Lunaballs have an internal mobile weight to are "responsive" to movement. Females seem to respond better to "live" toys.

@4onthefloor My wife was interested too. I got her an Evi, she used it about 3 times and now it is in a closet. I don't think my wife has the patience for a thing that she says doesn't really do anything.

Even in the beginning, I did get some interesting sensations from Aneros on my Prostate. I am now in a dry spell and I find that I lose patience too after nothing happens for an hour or so.

Like @isvara I am going to suggest the Luna balls because they 1 - do add some stimulation 2 - exercise the muscles and 3 - they can be work while doing other things.

This is just my/our experience. You know your wife better than we do. She may be willing to lounge around with the EVI in, mine won't.

@isvara Ok Luna Balls, my wife loved 50 Shades and has read the complete set...I'll ask her about those balls, rather than go like a bull in china shop and buy an Evi.

@xtimedt69 i find giving toys a rest or even retiring them sometimes happens...thanks though, sound like the luna balls might be interesting. You know i reckon my wife would lounge around with the luna or evi in, she is a nut for all sorts of exercise.

There are all sorts of pelvic muscle exercisers for women out there. It's really amazing how many. Just use your favorite Internet search engine. Any woman is going to have to experiment with different devices, and probably initially just see it as muscle exercise just like any other exercise for other parts of their body. Boring to do, but useful in terms of urinary continence, not having vaginal prolapsing issues, being able to grip your partner's penis inside of her, and eventually stronger and possibly easier orgasms.

Another thought is to actually use lube and weights on the devices to make it that much more difficult for to keep in. Thus it being more exercise. See the following link:

My wife notices a mild arousing sensation if she focuses on it, but won't come close to an orgasm, but she is difficult to get there anyway. Some women can orgasm just by thinking about it so I'm sure it has happened, just depends on the woman.