A Humorous View Of The Way Rich People Act

#60 – Foie Gras

Rich people love almost anything that is difficult to pronounce. It is all the better if it is also despised by Frisbee-throwing, Che Guevara loving, dreadlock sporting, patchouli wearing activists. Like a Hummer at a Green Peace rally, animal rights activists have a major hate-on for this tasty treat. This is why foie gras is so treasured in wealthy circles while baby seal pelts and snuff films, which anyone can pronounce, are take it or leave it items except among eccentric Europeans.

Let me put the Bentley in reverse, so to speak. It’s important to understand the essence of this delicacy to know why it is so divisive. Foie gras is fattened goose liver but this isn’t the issue as liverwurst is a favorite spreadable meat in trailer parks throughout the southern US and nobody is boycotting NASCAR. The battle lines are drawn because geese at most foie gras producers are force fed grain, corn and fat using a metal pipe shoved down the goose’s throat. To PETA this is an unethical mistreatment of the regal bird and former 007 Sir Roger Moore calls it a ‘delicacy of despair’. To the rich, this is business as usual as the goose has no gag reflex so it purportedly does not feel pain. This logic sounds remarkably similar to visits from high class escorts who likewise lack a gag reflex but just because you can cram something down their throat doesn’t mean you should.

Regardless of the ethical dilemma that foie gras production may pose there is an opportunity to make nice with the rich. There are two important guidelines; never talk about how it is made and please learn how to pronounce it. Nothing kills your chances of a second date like ordering “deux foys grays, garcon” or “a couple fozz grass s’il vous plait”. Enjoy the view of her Christian Louboutin’s heading for the exit because your date is over. However, elegantly request the “duck tenderloin tournedos with fwah-grrah” and your companion’s heart will melt as the words roll off your tongue. Showcasing your comfort with the finer things could mean your own lips encrusted with Guerlain KissKiss lipstick before the crème brûlée is served. This will help overcome any residual guilt. Last word of warning, never say down the hatch, it could prove traumatic!

Please educate yourself before you make claims about the conditions in which those geese/ducks live in. Although I don’t deny the status of foie gras as a delicacy, I think the inhumane methods by which it is procured makes the meal not worth it. I guess it is all a matter of personal opinion.

M.G.–Thank you for that link to those pictures. That whole thing is so horribly frightening and sad, and to think that all this for-sure suffering is to make what is essentially a luxury item (I understand that unspeakable cruelty is involved in harvesting caviar, too, although people are apt to view sturgeons as even “less sentient” than geese); in other words, not anything that anybody needs. I am sure that conditions are the same, if not worse, for “more normal” food that we eat every day, such as chicken, ham, milk, and so on. I know that vegetarians would consider any meat a luxury, but I think that any debate on that subject is off-topic in this particular forum. However, I do really wonder what long-term negative effects (if any) there may be for a species that treats other species like this. I just don’t see how this can bode well, yet I also wonder if eating non-factory-farm-produced food, including non-GMO crops, will ultimately be an item on this “Stuff Rich People Love” site, too.

Foie gras is wonderful. Unfortunatly there are many misconceptions about it. First off the geese (and ducks, as ducks are also used to make it sometimes) are not nailed down. They are allowed to roam around the farm in much, much better conditions than in an American factory farm. Second while they are fed with a tube, they are only fed twice a day and the tube is placed in thier mouths then removed, they are not hooked up to it 24/7. The amount of food they are fed is much less compared to body weight than say a double whopper meal at BK. The ducks and geese I saw in France were very well cared for and actually came to the farmer when it was feeding time. He gently held them with one hand and fed them with the other. These animals are probably better treated than 95% of farm animals in the world (probably due to the high value product being made from them). While I can see some veg-heads having a problem eating meat in general foie gras is far less cruel than must forms of eating meat. Which is why I will continue to serve and eat foie in all it’s wonderful glory.

Not the ones I’ve encountered personally at various farms – tell me which farms you have personally witnessed this at and the local health inspectorate would take an interest. Or is this anecdotal ‘evidence’ from a pseudo-vegetarian?