Somewhere among the pictures of pallets upcycled into adorable storage units and pendant lights
made from mason jars, a recipe for cauliflower pizza crust caught my eye. People were raving that
it was crispy, easy and unlike cauliflower.

So I tried it.

All I can say is “Ick.” It took me two days of candle-burning to rid my house of the stink.

Obviously, I had become unrealistically enamored of Pinterest posts and the promise of a hipper,
more beautiful life.

A lot of other Pinterest users apparently have, too.

The comically misguided posts are the fodder for Pinterest, You Are Drunk, a website and
associated Pinterest board that mocks good intentions gone bad. “Y’all are going a bit overboard
over there,” the website declares. “I’m here to help.”

Where else would I come across instructions for breast milk ice pops or cupcakes baked in
eggshells? Or find pictures of jewelry made from wisdom teeth or a knitted uterus inexplicably
photographed on a piano keyboard?

The best part of Pinterest, You Are Drunk, however, is the commentary that accompanies the
photos.

A few snarky gems:

• On a photo of a man in a barbershop, sporting a haircut that looks like a gecko crawling over
his head: “I guess I don’t need to ask how that job search is going.”

• On instructions for making reusable flannel toilet wipes: “My love for our planet has its
limits. This would be it.”

Handmade goods seem to be a big theme. I’ve seen crocheted cake pops, a cable-knit chair
slipcover, even a knitted fetal pig splayed on a dissecting pan. I have no idea why.

Shoes make frequent appearances: flippers with heels, boots with tails, shoes that look like cow
hooves. Gross food shows up a lot, too, notably graham crackers adorned like bloody Band-Aids and
poo-shaped brownies served in a kitty litter box filled with chopped nuts.

And, of course, who doesn’t want a flower planter made from a bra or a sausage-and-sauerkraut
creche?

That sort of makes the cauliflower pizza crust look reasonable, don’t you think?