Frustration vs. Fruition

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It’s Mai Birfdai

Yup, today I’m 25. A whole quarter-century’s worth of life. And this was supposed to be my moment in the sun, at goal in just over a year.

As you can see, I’m not there.

I’m not upset about this at all, surprisingly. I knew I was setting up a tough goal in that particular timeline, and I’m not sorry that I didn’t reach it by the time I wanted.

I’m not sorry that I’m wearing size 8 jeans right now.
I’m not sorry that now, I’d rather eat fruit salad than a candy bar.
I’m not sorry that I no longer have trouble breathing when I lay down in bed at night.
I’m not sorry that I no longer have to pause and catch my breath every time I go up a flight of stairs.
I’m not sorry that I can run 3 miles without stopping.
I’m not sorry that instead of casting my eyes down at the pavement, I have enough confidence to look at people when I pass them on the sidewalk.
I’m not sorry that instead of quitting, like every other hard thing I’ve tried to in my life, I’ve kept going.
I’m not sorry that I’m more proud of myself than I’ve ever been in my entire life.

I’m not sorry for all the positive ways my life has changed. And I’m not sorry that I set a time goal at the beginning of this long, strange journey. It helped keep me motivated at times when I just didn’t feel like going the extra mile.

So, I’m setting a new one, just a tough to reach as the first. My new endeavor is to be at my goal weight by April 17, 2010, when I run the Challenge Obesity 5K in St. Paul, Minn., with a group of fellow Weight Watchers. I want to cross that finish line at 145 lbs. And if I work hard enough, I know I can get there.

Oh lordy.. I just read all the way back to summer of 2009 in your blog.. You’ve got me hooked girl 🙂 Love your writing style and I started from most recent and worked my way back. Going from 225 down to 145 and now back to 183, I felt everything you felt during your weightloss and continue to feel 🙂 So glad you stuck with it because you look AMAZING! Happy Birthday. Following you on Twitter as well @h0neyb 🙂

Happy Birthday! I just wanted to tell you that I just spent the morning reading your whole blog and I love it. Thank you so much for sharing your journey with us! I just recently began my journey and it is so inspiring to see someone else who has done it. Plus, your blog makes me laugh. Can’t wait to read more!!! ~Mary