i do a lot of stupid stuff…

when it comes to boys.or crushes in general. i am terrible at doing everything i’msupposedto do. in that, i, of course, am referencing my friends suggestions of playing hard to get. My grandmother’s advice of waiting for the boy to call,he should be the one to call.Letting the boy decide where and when to go on dates, being patient & anticipating a boys interest.no, i’m not good at any of that. in fact, i almost always tend to do the opposite. i’ve put myself out there, initiated the first few words exchanged, i’ve let it be known that i am indeed interested & even at times called & asked a boy out. {gasps.}

i’m not going to act like i haven’t scared away a boy or two, but i’m also not going to act completely different than i would in one aspect of my life just to conform to how its “supposed to be.”fact: i am outgoing, & its rare for me to get embarassed.

i’ve been told often, by older members of my family that i may, in fact, intimidate boys— perhaps even turn them away because they desire to have complete hold on the relationship reigns… at first i agreed, whole-heartedly, or so i thought. but then as i tried to refrain from calling boys i wanted to hang out with, i realized that i am not a “sit back and wait it out” kind of girl.not inferring that i am, in anyway, an in your face crazy fool. But when, in my life have i shyed away from talking to a stranger, or expressing my true emotions for something? if i liked a tv show, i owned every ounce of school supplies they sold with the characters stamped on it. in fourth grade i sewed “A’s” to most of my shirts in lieu of my newly found favorite character, Laverne Defazio.

Moral of the story being, yes i do a lot of stupid shit when it comes to boys. i scare some away, some can’t even manage to admit to a girl being funnier than they are. But i decided a while back that even though i don’t necessarily conform to all the “dating norms” i surely will not pretend to be something i am not. because after the big vows were exchanged, there would be some big things to explain,i.e.: i really am outgoing– & karaoke is a must at any wedding reception.

plus, any boy who can’t keep up with me, {yet alone handle me}. is by no means the “man of my dreams”.“my man” better be ready to embark on the adventure of our lives with his outgoing wit of a girl.

in that…i’ve seen he’s just not that into you with two different friends of mine at two different times. & both times each of them, at one point during the movie has turned to me & exclaimed–o my gosh, Anna, that’s you!! in reaction to the character Gigi. at first i was a bit offended, but soon accepted the fact that she kinda, sorta, reallyis my twin. but this quote from the end of the movie makes me happy. & i may be exactly like Gigi, but at least i am in this way, too…

“Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we’re told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we’re so focused on finding our happy ending we don’t learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don’t, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn’t include a guy, maybe… it’s you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is… just… moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope.“-gigi.

“I may do a lot of stupid shit but I’m still a lot closer to love than you are.”-gigi