apart from this, this is something else I am trying to practise/force upon myself these days.

think more, listen more, talk less. wisdom is one of the rarest commodities these days.

I have become a lot noisier over the years, partly due to work experience where I was trained to present and “defend” my work. Or, perhaps it’s just Canberra. I miss the meaningful conversations in life, the times where I can remain silent, listen and process my thoughts. Give me that anytime, over having to argue in conversations, just because some people just can’t hold normal conversations here in Canberra.

Whatever it is, most of the people in college aren’t going to be seeing much of me these days. I figured that if I need to put in much, much, much more effort and hours to submit in June 2013, no later than that. With 24 hours a day, time is better well spent on the PhD, meaningful conversations, and people that matters.

On a different note, I’m pretty pleased with my run in the gym last night – 2.4km in 15 minutes. Nothing fantastic, but it’s been 2 weeks since my last run. It’s time to start training for this Mother’s Day Classic 10km run that Kas and I are planning to enter, and hopefully the Gold Coast Half Marathon in July.

less sleep. more coffee. more books. more running. more cats and dogs. more ice cream. more chocolates. more colours. more meaningful conversations. more fun. less people. less bullshit. less nonsense.

Yeap, that pretty much list out my philosophy towards the things I do and towards life in a concise manner, perhaps not so much of the ice cream and chocolates. But, it’s pretty true, isn’t it? Less bullshit, less nonsense.

“Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you’re really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I’ve got a few missing. It’s ok though, because I’ve got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who’s an 8-color type.. I’m like, “hey girl, magenta!” and she’s like, “oh, you mean purple!” and she goes off on her purple thing, and I’m like, “no – I want magenta!”

– John Mayer

It’s true. Where are the magnetas and the 64 colour boxes? For me, Asian/Singaporean men are like 8 colour boxes. I can’t seem to converse with them on the same wavelength. They either think I am too argumentative or just not docile enough.

I haven’t been looking. But, this week has been an extremely exhausting one, with many phone conversations that only points towards the inefficiency that plagues this country. At the end of the day, all I want is a meaningful conversation, which apparently is so unattainable as well. I find myself having to argue with the guys I talk to, because they wouldn’t stop teasing me. I find myself having to think of sentences to rebutt what they tell me. I am tired.

It certainly does’t help that I only had one meaningful conversation for the whole of this week. It was an unexpected one as well. But, thank you for that. I rather have one meaningful conversation, than none.

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”