Dear Abby.

The skinny on skinny-dipping laws

October 21, 2001|By Pauline Phillips and Jeanne Phillips.

Dear Abby: I chuckled over your hot tub letters. When I was a prosecutor in Vermont, a prosecutor in another county had someone arrested for skinny-dipping in a river. The local judge actually sentenced the "perpetrator" to jail, which caused an uproar.

Subsequently, I got a call from the state police about a complaint of skinny-dipping. Apparently the officer arrived to find an older woman at a farmhouse on a dirt road with no water in sight. She said: "Go across that field and climb up through those woods about a mile and a half, and you'll find a stream where they are bathing naked."

The trooper suggested that maybe he should check with me; I was the state's attorney. I began by reviewing old Norman Rockwell paintings showing such activities taking place allegedly in Vermont. (Along this line, I was unable to either confirm or refute the persistent rumor that Vermont's No. 1 politician, Calvin Coolidge, had also engaged in such activity in this state while subject to Vermont law.)

I also discussed -- after grants of immunity -- experiences of this nature enjoyed by some of Vermont's prosecutors, judges, law enforcement officers and sailboat operators. I even reviewed histories of some of my contemporaries.

It turned out that most Vermonters I talked to had engaged in such activity at some time in their lies. Therefore, to guide any law enforcement officer so lacking in other criminal matters to investigate, I offered the following guidelines:

(1) In public areas and semi-public areas: Nude bathing is not acceptable. In such instances the officer receiving the complaint should order the person to dress. Failure to stay clothed should result in a summons to court.

(2) On private land out of public view: The state has no legitimate interest and swimmers should be left alone.

(3) In secluded areas sometimes publicly used: If no member of the public is offended, no disorderly conduct has taken place. If members of the public complain, proceed as in No. 1 above.

-- Sen. Patrick J. Leahy, Washington, D.C.

Dear Sen. Leahy: My hat's off to you. (But that's all!)

----------

Dear Abby is written by Pauline Phillips and daughter Jeanne Phillips.