The following is an excerpt from the “Combating Emotional Vampires” on-line course.

Relationships are always an energy exchange. To stay feeling our best, we must ask ourselves: Who gives us energy? Who saps it? It’s important to be surrounded by supportive, heart-centered people who make us feel safe and secure. It’s equally important to pinpoint the emotional vampires, who, whether they intend to or not, leech our energy.

To protect your sensitivity, it’s imperative to name and combat these emotional vampires. They’re everywhere: coworkers, neighbors, family, and friends. In Energy Psychiatry I’ve treated a revolving door of patients who’ve been hard-hit by drainers–truly a mental health epidemic that conventional medicine doesn’t see. I’m horrified by how many of these “emotionally walking wounded” (ordinarily perceptive, intelligent individuals) have become resigned to chronic anxiety or depression. Why the blind spot? Most of us haven’t been educated about draining people or how to emancipate ourselves from their clutches, requisite social skills for everyone desiring freedom. Emotional draining is a touchy subject. We don’t know how to tactfully address our needs without alienating others. The result: We get tongue-tied, or destructively passive. We ignore the SOS from our gut that screams, “Beware!” Or, quaking in our boots, we’re so afraid of the faux pas of appearing “impolite” that w! e become martyrs in lieu of being respectfully assertive. We don’t speak out because we don’t want to be seen as “difficult” or uncaring.

Vampires do more than drain our physical energy. The super-malignant ones can make you believe you’re an unworthy, unlovable wretch who doesn’t deserve better. The subtler species inflict damage that’s more of a slow burn. Smaller digs here and there can make you feel bad about yourself such as, “Dear, I see you’ve put on a few pounds” or “It’s not lady-like to interrupt.” In a flash, they’ve zapped you by prodding areas of shaky self-worth.

This is my credo for vampires: Their antics are unacceptable; you must develop a successful plan for coping with them. I deeply believe in the merciful message of The Lord’s Prayer to “forgive people their trespasses,” but I’m also a proponent of preventing the unconscious or mean-spirited from trespassing against us. Taking a stand against draining people is a form of self-care and canny communication that you must practice to give your freedom legs.

What turns someone into an emotional vampire? First, a psychological reason: children often reflexively mimic their parents’ most unflattering traits. A self-absorbed father can turn you into a self-absorbed son. Early modeling has impact. Studies of Holocaust survivors reveal that many became abusive parents themselves. The second explanation involves subtle energy. I’ve observed that childhood trauma–mistreatment, loss, parental alcoholism, illness–can weaken a person’s energy field. This energy leakage may condition those with such early wounds to draw on the vitality of others to compensate; it’s not something most are aware of. Nevertheless, the effects can be extreme. Visualize an octopus-like tendril extending from their energy field and glomming onto yours. Your intuition may register this as sadness, anger, fatigue, or a cloying, squirrelly feeling. The degree of mood change or physical reaction may vary. A vampire’s effects can stun like a sonic blast or make you! slowly wilt. But it’s the rare drainer that sets out to purposely enervate you. The majority act unconsciously, oblivious to being an emotional drain.

Let me tell you the secret of how a vampire operates so you can outsmart one. A vampire goes in for the kill by stirring up your emotions. Pushing your buttons throws you off center, which renders you easier to drain. Of all the emotional types, empaths are often the most devastated. However, certain emotional states increase everyone’s vulnerability. I myself am most susceptible to emotional vampires when I feel desperate, tired, or disempowered. Here are some others:

•Low self-esteem

•Depression

•A victim mentality

•Fear of asserting yourself

•Addiction to people-pleasing

When encountering emotional vampires, see what you can learn too. It’s your choice. You can simply feel tortured, resentful, and impotent. Or, as I try to do, ask yourself, “How can this interchange help me grow?” Every nanosecond of life, good, bad, or indifferent, is a chance to become emotionally freer, enlarge the heart. If we’re to have any hope of breaking war-mongering patterns, we must each play a part. As freedom fighters, strive to view vampires as opportunities to enlist your highest self and not be a sucker for negativity. Then you’ll leave smelling like a rose, even with Major-League Draculas.

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About Karen Kubicko

www.KarenKubicko.com
I found my joy in studying and participating in past life regressions. Ask me any question on past life regression and I will blog the answer.
By re-experiencing my own personal past lives, I’ve learned a great deal about myself on multiple levels.
I have remembered nearly forty past lives. Through total immersion into each memory, I have released a variety of unfounded fears, explained relationships, alleviated health issues, reawakened psychic talents and explained my fondness of certain time periods and geographic locations.
When you personally remember a past life, you can heal yourself of health issues and phobias. Do you have any unfounded fears or phobias in your life? Do you have a nagging health issue? Are these issues unfounded in your current lifetime?
Think about it.
In my book, Life Is Just Another Class – One Soul’s Journey Through Past Life Regression, I share some of these lifetimes with you, in hopes that I will inspire and excite you to take your own spiritual journey. It is available on Amazon and at Barnes & Noble.
We experience several lives here on Earth to learn and to grow.
I invite you to embrace this classroom we call Earth and get to know why you are truly here in this lifetime.
xoxox
Karen

so do you think empaths that are in tune with “consciousness” would be affected by Jon Gordon’s energy vampire? my first thought would be that as a seer, one would let go of the “me” and “I” ego feelings in energy- so would not feel like their buttons were pushed (reactive) by an energy vampire??? I don’t know, I’m not a seer, and am leaning more in the direction of Buddhism traits of evaluating the mind… great post and thanks for inspiring some thought!!!

Hello Mike,
Thank you! I never heard of Jon Gordon – but is he ever fun to hear talk!! Wow. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EhU2KGoDv8
Jon certainly was not affected by his own dad’s negativity. It is your willpower to do what you think is right that overcomes the naysayers. I know I have had my fair share of them in what I do… but yet, I push on since I know it is my calling. Thank you for being part of my universe.
Namaste,
Karen

This came up again in my memory timeline, and it is very timely! I would love to learn more about this. I think I am somewhat of an Empath as is my Vampire, can this be. Would love to meet you someday!