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Sunday, 18 March 2012

A few Fran thoughts for Mother's Day

My kids have all left home now, and don't live nearby, so Mother's Day is a bit different round here. But then, on the other hand, Mother's Day with OUR family was always going to be different, whether they were here or not ...

Here are my Mother's Day thoughts:

1. If you pass on your bizarre and dark sense of humour to your son, you have only yourself to blame when your Mother's Day card is the birthday card you sent him earlier that month, recycled, and with all the irrelevant bits crossed out.

2. For the same reason, your older daughter's version of 'buying you a drink for Mother's Day' may involve her sellotaping a teabag inside your card.

3. Sending your youngest daughter a text saying, 'Happy Mother's Day. Oops. No. That's YOUR line.' is likely to be taken offence at, however funny you thought it was at the time.

4. When your kids have left home, taking yourself and your husband out for a Mother's Day lunch is always going to feel a little strange as you sit there, surrounded by families of 33, on your table for two. On the other hand, it is more peaceful than it was when they were young, not having to a) stop them singing and doing beat box/playing drums on the casserole dishes; b) stop them playing table football with vegetables.

Hubert wasn't going to be quite so gleeful when he realised that his parents, aunts, uncles,
grandparents and cousins had all sloped out of the restaurant, leaving him there alone

25 comments:

I have sent my mother flowers and a restrained card of the 'Happy Mother's Day' variety. She is pleased. She also has one from my sister-in-law, twice the size and four times the sentiment. My girls are doing it their way - but have also not opted for sentiment: you're right, we reap what we sow.(I LOVE the teabag idea and may have to pinch it.)

I liked last year's Mother's Day card better , so it's going back up , too . It's probably just as well only one daughter ever sends a card , otherwise I might look as though I had secret offspring . Meanwhile , I'll adopt anyone who sends me a teabag .

I kicked my eldest up out of bed this morning at 8.20am. (He'd overslept as he didn't get in until 4am)

Then I fed dog and cat (after clearing cat shit up from utility :O Seriously)

Next, I walked dog (cat followed us,) Upon return, retained martyred expression and complained sufficiently loudly until both boys were well and truly awake and appreciative of wake up prompts Youngest was mortified that he'd slept in and not made me cuppa. Eldest had chance to write my card ;)

Sorted eldest's breakfast and DROVE HIM to work.

Both boys were eternally grateful, of course, that they hadn't got up earlier, had to feed/walk animals and discover cat shit for themselves.

Result? - All day, the pair of them repeatedly told me how much they love me, and how I'm best mum in the world!

About Me

I'm a writer and English teacher based in Warwickshire.

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Recent review: Funny and easy to read, Fran Hill's 'Being Miss' charts the life of a teacher in a secondary school...in one day. The day is jam packed with unfortunate incidents and sharp, insightful descriptions. Beautifully written with a delightfully flippant narrator. Great fun!

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