Buzz

He wears short shorts: Look, you gearheads can have your Palm Pilot VII, your Franklin Planners, and all the other fancy-pants scheduling systems you can find. Buzz keeps track of appointments the old-fashioned way--by writing them down on a calendar featuring a half-naked Dallas County court commissioner.

What? You've never seen John Wiley Price's self-published calendar, "JWP: Fit at Fifty"? Well, you'd better hurry, because this plush item--a wall calendar that features pictures of the longtime Dallas official posing on a motorcycle, in a pool, in workout attire, sans shirt, etc.--is about to be rendered useless. See, the calendar only runs from April 2000 through March 2001. Why? Because April 24 is JWP's birthday, he says.

With April '01 bearing down on us, screaming teen-age girls want to know, will there be a sequel?

"We're working on one now," Price says. "It should be out by the end of April, around my birthday."

No truth to the rumor that this one will be an interactive calendar aimed at gearheads, complete with MP3 files of Barry White's "I've Got So Much To Give." But we do have a suggested new title: "JWP: Tight Buns at Fifty-one."