Tuesday, April 7, 2015

It's been a very long time since I have posted here. All my focus was shifted to my Positive Warfare facebook page, because... well, mostly because my life has gotten chaotic since I began working two jobs over a year ago, and facebook is more convenient. I have found that I just don't have the energy or time for pursuits of writing and art work anymore. However, today I was prompted by The Narrator's Study to introduce my muse... specifically, to write about what inspires me.

Hmmm, well... I have never stopped to consider what exactly inspires me to write or paint. I know what inspires me to share at Positive Warfare: my struggle with depression and anxiety, but what is it that prompts my artistic side to write, draw, paint, etc? That's a very good question.

Admittedly, sometimes it is to ward off depression; my artistic pursuits have always been great therapy. Rarely do I use art to express the darkness that haunts me. Isn't that usually what art therapy is... putting your troubles on paper or canvas and getting them out of your system? Well, I don't.

Instead of putting fears and icky darkness into my work, I opt to create positive, pretty things. My artistic pursuits enable me to focus on the positive and get my mind off the negative. However, I do admit, that on very rare occasions, I have in fact chosen to portray the dark ugliness in my work, but those gloomy pursuits are extremely scarce. I have found that the more positive endeavors have better results, all the way around.

Other times, it's a photo in a fashion magazine, a painting I see while I'm out and about, or browsing crafts on Pinterest, that trigger the need to do something creative; sometimes, it's sheer boredom and the desire to do something fun and whimsical; then there are the times I paint (or craft) with the sole intention of creating a gift for someone.

On rare occasions, a dream will provoke an artsy whim; however, those dream inspired notions usually end in frustration, because I can't seem to create what was in my dream; the image is never as clear after I awake, turning my foggy memories of my dream into a mocking taunt; it's extremely maddening. I've learned to dismiss such trickery.

So, back to my Muse... I've come to the conclusion that my Muse is totally random.