Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Waiting To Exhale

Someone once said, ~Loving a child no matter what age, makes your break in places you never knew existed.~ Without a doubt, the loss of any child in regards to death or have gone missing is most definitely a tremendously heavy burden to carry within a parent's heart. A kind of personal, hellish torture so unbelievably painful it can not only be difficult to breathe, but think as well. For it's an incredibly heartbreaking situation indeed at the sheer thought of having no idea of the whereabouts or experiencing the unfortunate loss of a part of parent's heart and soul, especially at an early age. Sadly, the possibility of unwavering hope can unfortunately turn to absolute tragedy as family and friends struggle in trying to make sense of the loss itself, which is a feeling that never really goes away no matter how many years have passed.
As I said before, the loss of any child in regards to death or have gone missing is most definitely a tremendously heavy burden to carry within a parent's heart. Thinking about it further, the heavy burden is in a sense a huge weight of emotions ranging anger and frustration to absolute disbelief that metaphorically wrap so tightly around a parent's heart it feels like being in a straightjacket one can't ever escape from no matter how hard you try. True, when a parent is emotionally struggling in trying to remove the unwanted emotions stirring within it can get so overwhelming that there's an innate feeling of not being able to breathe as if you're in some ways suffocating. Thinking about it further, it's that same unwanted emotions piling on all at once, in a manner of speaking, to where it can lead to become claustrophobic within yourself.
If you think about it, when it comes to a missing child or an untimely death of one the ability to think clearly has its difficulties. A mother, more so than a father, will get into a mental mindset focusing all her energy into trying to stay positive as best she can even though there are millions of overwhelming thoughts swirling/bombarding her head in such a way it can very well push her to the brink of insanity. Oftentimes, the act of keeping herself busy in some ways helps as a distraction from mentally dealing with potentially accepting a harsh reality even though she refuses to until there is solid evidence to the contrary. Hey, it's what any mother I suppose would in order to keep herself from falling apart knowing full well if she does take a moment to herself the proverbial mental flood gates will open leading to the flood of emotional tears pouring out of her.
Let me ask you this question to all you parents out there, what is your greatest fear when it involves your kids? If you answered getting taken by a stranger or passing away too soon you'd possibly be correct. I think it's safe to say no parent wants to ever find himself/herself burying their son and/or daughter under circumstances in which his/her life was tragically cut short before it has even started. As much as being able to imagine the proverbial "what if" of a precious life continuing to exist instead of experiencing an untimely ending, hold on to the cherished memories no matter how big of small they are. What it primarily comes down it is celebrating their life on a daily basis knowing full well they did in fact bring joy to your life in some way, shape, or form so much so you either smiled, laughed, and/or cried.
On June 5th, 2017 12 year old Pensacola, FL native Naomi Jones' body was found after she went missing on May 31st, 2017. A young girl's life filled with so much joy and potential for the future cut short too soon. Ultimately, Jones' death is a senseless tragedy perpetrated by a monster who failed to register as a sex offender. Hopefully, a far better resolution should come to pass when it comes to having stricter policies on registering sex offenders because other cases resembling Naomi Jones' have yet to be solved. Unfortunately, it's those unsolved cases of a child/children reported missing or otherwise have parents who haven't been able to truly exhale in being able to get the closure they deserve. In the end, it's those parents who are waiting to exhale that if or when they do get closure of any kind I hope they'll breathe much easier and with that also have a sense of long overdue peace.

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Let's see, I'm a single, 39 year old 5'2-ish pinoy who worked with kids for the 14 years and I was pretty good at it. I am now working in a totally different area away from kids and it's awesome. Anyways, for fun I listen to music, draw, play video games, watch movies, hang with friends, surf the internet, go skydiving, and write down my thoughts, which I call Yodaisms. I'm pretty much a quiet, laid back dude once you get to know me and that's pretty much it, so have fun reading my thoughts. Take care and peace out!