My CSB VIPR Story:During the 2012 Detroit Auto Show the TSA showed up en masse to secure the People Mover, a raised tram system in Detroit. As I was standing on the Greektown platform a wild VIPR Team appeared. This team was two guys decked out like they went to the SOCOM gear store and said "two of everything please". Of course the impact of all their visible tan body armor was somewhat lessened by the fact the body armor was sized to fit around beer guts. Plus a somewhat clueless looking woman with a golden retriever. As they walked out and down the platform one of the men growled at me "Please step back sir, the dog needs room to operate." The dog however smelled the takeout pizza box I had in my hand lunged at the box. I was pondering making a comment about the dog needing remedial training, but figured it wasn't worth pissing off the power tripping douchebags. However by this time a pair of Detroit Police officers had arrived to see what was going on and they demanded the VIPR Team get off the platform and take that "damn dog" with them.

All three TSA clowns were so busy arguing with the Detroit Police they totally lost track of the dog. They're yelling about being federal agents while ignoring the fact I'm now scratching their lab behind the ears and feeding him a breadstick (poor guy deserved it, he has to work with the TSA all day). Just I got on the People Mover two more Detroit Police officers showed up and announced that the TSA agents had one minute to get off the platform or they'd be under arrest.

/the poor dog tried to get on the People Mover with me//actually caused his handler to fall on her ass because he lunged to follow me (and the food) onto the train and pulled her down/I hope sequestration gutted their budget

Elite TSA eh? So these are the ones that actually graduated high school then?

/still, having unobtrusive detectors for radiation and only get in the public's face when they want to know why one was tripped? That's doing it right.//unless this was one of those drill situation where they were pre-warned that guy was on the train and they had to find him, that's just sheer bullshiat then.

ThatGuyFromTheInternet:The more hyperbolic the name of the government project (VIPR team, USA PATRIOT Act), the worse it is. FFS, our most badass special forces teams are named after this:[ec.europa.eu image 450x297]

Dictatorial_Flair:Great. Now the high school dropout squad has Geiger Counters they don't know how to use are are armed with farking military hardware. I feel so goddamn safe now.

I'd really love to have some physics geeks ask them in the field about the thresholds and sensitivity of the Geiger counters, whether specific obscure elements that are radioactive trigger them, and other scientific questions to get a "Huh, whuh?" response. It'd be like XKCD cosplay.

Tobin_Lam:ThatGuyFromTheInternet: The more hyperbolic the name of the government project (VIPR team, USA PATRIOT Act), the worse it is. FFS, our most badass special forces teams are named after this:[ec.europa.eu image 450x297]

Seals are badass. I bet you would lose a fight with one in hand to hand combat.

Yeah, but if you turn the tables the difference in abilities is just as apparent. Ask a SEAL to solve a polynomial equation sometime and see what happens.

MFAWG:ThatGuyFromTheInternet: The more hyperbolic the name of the government project (VIPR team, USA PATRIOT Act), the worse it is. FFS, our most badass special forces teams are named after this:[ec.europa.eu image 450x297]

It's an acronym. The more you know!

So is VIPR and USA PATRIOT. God help us when the U.S.A. F.R.E.E.D.O.M. F.O.R.E.V.E.R. P.R.O.T.E.C.T.I.N.G. L.I.B.E.R.T.Y. G.O.D. B.L.E.S.S. A.M.E.R.I.C.A. N.I.N.E. E.L.E.V.E.N. N.E.V.E.R. A.G.A.I.N. Unit is announced.

Girion47:I once did a baseline safety analysis of a Viper team in a fairly large city down in Florida. Got to ride around with the guys, see where they set up, and what kind of unique dangers they were exposed to when doing their job.

One of them had been on a sub for the Navy, he had all kinds of crazy ass stories about what happened on his boat.