The Tri-corder reading says: "It's all Bollocks, Captain"

Category Archives: ….try and keep him talking..I’ll see if I can get one of the nurses..

After the collapse of the Fish pedicure business the poor things have been floundering around for new careers. It really has been a shame.

But now my mate Dennis – who is sort of our local equivalent to Sir Anal Sugar – has seen a business opportunity and snapped up all the dis-plaiced aquarians for his new venture.

He has started a similar line of shops whereby he puts the little fellas to work chewing off peoples ‘klinkers’.

The shops are called:

Our Sole Pleasure

It’s like the pedicure set-up except you dunk your arse in the tank (you don’t have to be sat in the shop window but some seem to prefer it) and let the fish get to work, clearing away the bits that you failed to reach with the traditional Andrex approach.

There have been some early teething troubles – one tank shattered under a chav’s weight and cut their bum to ribbons and there was an unfortunate occasion when a random piranha got in the tank and shredded a bloke’s gonads.