Geek Girls Rule! #518 – Forgiveness and Moving On

I come from a family that views grudge holding as a sport, and an art. I try really hard not let not forgetting that someone has fucked me over crawl over that incredibly fine line into a grudge.

These two things are not the same thing.

Forgive and Forget is stupid advice.

Because if someone hurts you, betrays your trust, or harms others in a way that reveals them to be untrustworthy, or maybe not real cautious of others’ boundaries and/or personhood, it is a good idea to keep that in mind.

I tend to hold them at arm’s length ever after, which just makes sense from a harm reduction perspective.

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them.” ~ Maya Angelou

The problem is that our society, particularly when it comes to dudes, seems to think that forgiving someone means pretending that…