"I came back this year with a wheelbarrow of furry smut, like I typically do at these things. I think it's because the furz0r think that it will be funny to ask me if I want some, and I unequivocally do, which generally leads to some awkward side-steppinf and floor-looking on their part. I want all pornography, all day. I never want to not have it. It may be that Iím outside the accepted diagram on this, but I find that kind of thing profoundly educational, and it is educational at a rate inversely proportional to its carnal appeal. I hope that I live to see alien pornography; Iíve held forth on the topic multiple times, and the thought of conscious molecules swapping electrons generates so much lust I have to bite down on a knuckle to vent it. I would link to the stuff I got,but I'd rather that people didn't fuck with him. If a Tiger-American wants to chase a fox around a football field with his dick out, itís like, score. I wasnít going for the sports pun especially, but if it improves the paragraph for you, it's yours."

Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll complain, then set things on fire, demanding more free fish without having to work for it. Moral: dont give strange men free fish.

Bad cholesterol. Let me tell you about bad cholesterol. Our body makes testosterone out of it. No testosterone, no sex drive. No sex drive, no sex. No sex, no babies. No babies, EXTINCTION OF THE HUMAN RACE!!! THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR TALKING ABOUT BAD CHOLESTEROL!!!!!!

Cosmology lecturer on tonight's edition of Horizon on the Standard Model of Cosmology:"Ooh, I don't like dark energy and I hope it goes away soon."Way to explain scientific opinion in a way the uninitiated can understand when it comes to dealing with conflicting theories about the continued expansion of the observable universe. She must be an epic lecturer. I mean it.

^ Who talks like that??? When I talk politely, I don't talk like that. I don't hear anyone talking like that. Why is it the default greeting when writing a presentation letter? This sounds like the kind of things that only become normal on meth.

(At least this ridiculous meme seems to be contained within the French language)