Reply by mmh

I’m sorry to hear the relationship is ending, but it’s better to have a bad one end than to live with someone who doesn’t love or appreciate you.

As a female, I’m quite impressed as to how sensitive you guys are. Love, or falling out of love can hurt both sides. Unfortunately one side may get hurt harder than the other.

The advice of doing something for yourself is priceless. Be creative, do something new and different. It doesn’t have to be death defying, just do something new and learn while you do it. (Get into a new exercise routine and stop smoking, you don’t need to let this sabatage your non-smoking efforts; Take a class; Learn a new craft, trade, cook something different; Start a new type of wood working project, go to a gallery or museum or type of entertainment you normaly would not try.) You will start to feel better once you have a sense of adventure in your life and you will enjoy being by yourself rather than sulking and feeling worthless. You are important, and you are worthy of being treated well, so you don’t need to be around someone who doesn’t appreciate you and constantly picks on or nags you.

Being alone does not mean you have to be lonely. Learn to be good to yourself, as this will elevate your self esteem and when you do this, others will see how whole you are and want to be a part of your life. Be careful not to jump into a new relationship head first. Meeting new people is wonderful, but you need to stand on your own two feet before you want to lean on anyone else, the same goes for them too. Your partner should not lean on you and become overwhelming with burden or in need of constant attention. They need to learn to be their own person, so that the two of you can share, learn and love in a healthy way.

Good luck! Do something for yourself and move forward. You’re worth it!

-- "They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night." ~ Edgar Allan Poe