This couple certainly has their work cut out for them if they want to repair their fractured marriage. An affair is very hard to come back from.

Image: Lucy and Carl from The Last Resort on Nine

Lucy, 38, and Carl, 37, who after 12-years together both want to move on from the affair, not only for their own sake but because they have two kids who would be devastated if their parents broke up.

It was after the birth of their second child that Lucy struggled with motherhood, feeling unsupported by Carl and losing her libido, leaving Carl feeling rejected and unloved.

Which is when some men fall into the arms of another woman as Carl did. Because that's a good idea.

Carl has said multiple times he feels no guilt or remorse for the affair, which is just infuriating. Carl and Lucy are just one of five couples desperately trying to save their relationships on the show.

"And did you notice as well there's no sense of guilt or apology until he saw that mocked-up wedding," Erin said. "That was it. That was the first time we actually saw some sort of remorse from him."

The Last Resort resident psychologist Sandy Rea explained on this week's podcast episode that it took some work to get the couples to a place where people like Carl "could get to a place where they could start to think of their behaviour and what they needed to do for their relationship."

Sandy Rae from The Last Resort talks to Erin and Katherine on relationship podcast Sweet Spot:

It's this failure to think of the effect of their behaviour on their partner that has led resentment to fester in each of them.

"One of the lines I gave to the couples is, 'Resentment is a bit like swallowing a poison pill and expecting the other person to die'."

That means Lucy needs to forget the resentment but first Carl has to cop to what he has done.

Carl, you had an affair, not a fling,not a dalliance, an affair.

Lucy chose to burn a copy of the text she sent to the other woman on the show. Now Carl needs to say he is sorry.

"He betrayed the trust in that marriage," Sandy said. "He didn't quite grasp at that point what impact that had on the marriage."

His lack of emotional connection isn't just reserved for his own failures. Lucy said Carl's idea of romance is to say, "Do you want a root", which Sandy says she focused on in his therapy.

And it's not an act, Sandy said. Carl was actually incapable of owning it.

"He couldn't actually see why this has hurt Lucy so much. He just couldn't understand that.

"Good relationships are all about having good empathy and what we got him to do, what we're aiming to do, is for him to have empathy for the pain he caused Lucy."

It's hard to imagine ever getting over an affair but Sandy says cheating doesn't have to mean the end of your relationship. "It depends on a whole set of values, it depends on forgiveness, it depends whether you can put the pain and the anger and resentment to bed, it depends on if you feel betrayal is possible to repair."

Sandy says it's also about love.

"These couples are here on the show because they don't want to lose each other."