Fitness

27/04/2015 06:57 BST
|Updated
23/06/2015 06:59 BST

How to Start a Bodybuilding Journey

Richard Batt
Writer and blogger on politics, technology and entertainment

Those who know me, know that I often decide to go on crazy little fitness journeys. Back in 2013 I went all out on the Insanity Workout, in 2014 I decided to try the 5:2 diet and earlier this year I decided to see if it was possible to live on orange juice (Answer: No.)

As I spent quite a lot of time performing as a professional wrestler (the "International Pop Sensation" Jayson Mayson.... yes, I know - it's a beautiful name, I wish I'd been born with it) I always had to try and keep in shape. I'm hoping to make a slight comeback to the this year, so it looks like I'm going to have to find a way to get my fitness up... and keep it there (kind of like juggling... unfortunately I was never any good at the whole juggling malarkey).

During my days as the "International Pop Sensation"

The trouble is that most diets and workouts are short term solutions and hard to live on for any length of time. I lost almost 4 stone on the Insanity Workout and looked good at the end of it, but as soon as I stopped it the weight snuck back on (like a fare dodger on a train who sneaks off to the toilets when the conductor comes to check the tickets then creeps back to his seat.).

The generation I belong to (or maybe it's just me) don't seem to understand the concept of patience. Putting in effort and reaping the rewards later is a massive part of trying to become a bodybuilder. I know I am always attracted to products that advertise things like - "GET RIPPED TODAY!" The critical part of my brain says "this isn't going to work, you haven't worked out in a year and you're eating a massive chocolate bar right now!" But the less critical part of my brain, which influences my buying choices, responds "but look at that photo! She was fat - now she's thin. He was skinny - now he's got muscles upon muscles... and somehow he's changed race."

The idea of waiting for something to happen is completely alien to me. I usually start a workout routine one day and expect to have lost weight by the next... as though it wasn't actually a workout routine at all, but a weight-loss-magic-spell performed through interpretative dance. I usually expect workout supplements to work the same way, as though they aren't really additions to my diet but actually an elixir created in a witch's cauldron which will banish the fat from my body... or turn me into a frog.

But in order to actually get into the holy grail bodybuilding shape that I want to get into - I'm going to have to stick to a diet, keep up with a workout and take some supplements... which I'm looking forward to about as much as I look forward to a root canal. However, I have my plan ready, now I just have to motivate myself to start it.

My plan is to start on the new Insanity Max 30 workout to drop some weight and keep fit, which I imagine will cause me to resume my recurring nightmares about Shaun T waking me up in the middle of the night to do 3 hours' worth of jumping jacks.

I'll also head to the gym daily to stick to a weights program, when I'm at the gym I've always been good at the whole weight lifting thing. Unfortunately, I'm not so good at the actually going to the gym thing... I think I'm going to need someone to nag at me on an hourly basis until I actually head out of the house.

Keeping this out of my diet is going t be hard work!

In terms of a diet I'm taking the option of not actually following one, but taking the time to eat lean, healthy food in small, regular meals. Am I looking forward to this? No! And I expect to crash by about day 5 and spend the whole day eating bag after bag of Doritos!

I have been advised to add the ingredient Nitrosigine to my diet, because it boosts nitric oxide levels in as quickly as 30 minutes, lasting for up to 3 hours. The scientific benefits look really good, it's FDA approved and my friend is looking in incredible shape. I've stocked up on a number of the different products containing Nitrosigine on his recommendation, now I just need to actually use them!​

Now that I've got everything in place to start my fitness journey, I just need to get started. Of course, this is the part that I'm most reluctant to do! Usually what happens now is that I say "I'll start tomorrow, I'll start tomorrow, I'll start tomorrow" for around the next 2 years until I realise that the supplements I've brought are going to run out of date so I have to force myself to start!

However, I think I've got a better way to force myself to get started... and that is to force myself to come back on here in a months' time and let you know how I'm getting on.

So check back in a months' time and I'll tell how spectacularly well my fitness plan is going.... or how I've spectacularly failed to even get started!