“It was beautiful,” said front man Lars Gunblade. “Oceans of bodacious NYC ta-tas. It made me glad to be alive. I was aspired and the entire woody factor goes without saying. A rock concert in NYC isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be. This made the whole thing a lot more bearable. Even so, it wasn’t what we expected in a way.”

“I don’t exactly fancy coming back to Madison Square Garden,” said guitarist Vas Defrens. “A rock concert at Madison Square Garden isn’t something to look forward to. But the fans got a great rock concert and I got laid by a girl’s soccer team from Rutgers so there’s not much to complain about.”

Female fans at Madison Square Garden were totally cool with being topless at the rock concert. “I loved it,” said Traci, a college dropout from Columbia University. “Yeah, I was mass-groped before I left but I suppose that’s just to be expected. I mean, I can’t say as I blame them. These are some pretty tempting targets. Halfway through the concerts, I gave them a generous feel as well. Those guys sitting behind me at the rock concert at Madison Square Garden choose wisely when they choose me to feel up.”

“Oh, it was disgusting,” said Ruth G., a woman who resides near Madison Square Garden in NYC. “Half-naked girls strutting up and down the street in front of my apartment. Those little temptresses with their supple breasts gently bouncing in the chilly evening air as they paid no attention to my tasteless comments and leering cat calls. What is the world coming to when that doesn’t work?”

“Topless chicks in the audience wasn’t all it was cracked up to be,” said Gunblade. “We want chicks to be like completely naked at the next rock concert at Madison Square Garden but we’re having a tough time with the NYPD on that one. Even bribing them doesn’t seem to work, which is pretty odd given this is the NYPD we’re talking about.”