Regrets, I’ve had a few, so few I can mention them all. First, that time a girl was greeting me with a hug but I thought she was trying to kiss me so I closed my eyes and went for it/head-butted her. Second, the time I tried to bleach my hair. Finally, chugging aREAD MORE

My uncle Frank told me a story about how one day his trailer was stolen from his house in Tipperary. Frank phoned the police. Made a report. Few days later two guys showed up at his door asking him if he wants to buy a trailer – The very trailer that was stolen. NotREAD MORE

Hard to tell in LA if most of the sound guys who I meet out happen to be gay or if gay guys are just sound to me. That’s the trouble here trying to make friends. You try to be open but never quite sure what the ulterior motive is. Take last Saturday. I’m DJingREAD MORE

Never Going Back Again – Fleetwood Mac Thanks to all my Apple products (and their horrendous battery life) I always feel so connected (to the wall). As a result, like my hopes and dreams, my phone almost always dies the minute I leave my house. iPhone. Battery. Bad. Anyway, last night I managed to lock myselfREAD MORE

Not a fan of dates. Many reasons. Here are a few: So. It’s Christmas Eve babe and I’m not in the drunk tank. Yet. I am on a date though. Christmas. Eve. Babe. What else would you be doing. Eve, the girl I’m on a date with, is looking unreal. Savage dress. Best I’ve seen. SpecialREAD MORE

http://www.independent.ie/opinion/your-voice/first-person-mark-hayes-i-want-to-be-the-best-30457187.html When I was a young wee lad making my way in the real capital of Ireland, Cork, boy, I had little to no clue what I wanted to be when I grew up. Besides the best, obviously. The question was, the best at what? For a while I thought I was going to leadREAD MORE

In case you didn’t know, my new book PreDumb: Before I Came to LA is now out, online so far at least. Amazon, Barnes & Noble, all the usual haunts. Click on the links to go forth and have a gander. Otherwise go into your nearest book store and demand the speed up their orders.READ MORE

Can’t beat being on the front page of a newspaper wearing a leprechaun hat. Couldn’t find a version online so here’s the original gibber. Recent radio interview too where I ramble on and on and on. New book PREDUMB out soon. Narcissistic levels reaching new high. Mountain Dew – The Clancy Brothers Blacks, whites, Asians,READ MORE

Hairdresser Hayes I had been dreading going into fifth year purely down to Dirk coming to stay with me. The German students were due back for two weeks at the start of October for their portion of student exchange. At least we got two weeks off class at the start of the year to goREAD MORE

Boogie Shoes – KC & The Sunshine Band Winning Streak. Back in the day this was the main TV game show in Ireland. Might still be. Contestants would go on and spin a wheel or guess something and win money. The easy part was winning. The hard part was getting on. I think you hadREAD MORE