Woman Right in Islam ?

I was talking to my mother last night about everything and end up have conversations about woman right in Islam. These conversations begin when my mom talk about my cousin who is abused by her husband. She's physical and mentally abused and my mother seem very angry yet couldn't do anything about it. I'm not really sure why I started to open the Qur'an 4:34. So I asks my mom is that OK for man to beat up his woman? She told me if the woman disobey her husband then he has the right to beat her up when is necessary,also she mentioned to me that the husband has to remind or warning her before he take the last action to beat her up if the problem not resolve. So I asks my mom again, what if my husband beat me up are you OK? she said if you have done something wrong and your husband already try to remind you and you still didn't obey him than yes. So I aks her right in whose eye?. It took her a while to answer me but than she saids Muslim woman have obligation to totally submission for the husband. I got really dissapointed and said to my mom, nobody will nor allow to beat me up not even my husband,also there are no reasons for man beating up his wife. My Mother finally told me there is nothing that I can do because it is written on the Qur'an and I shouldn't even questioning it. She asks me to please drop the conversations and talk about something else and I did. She might get the idea of me dislike Islam. Make me wonder and ask to myself hmmmmmm basically man could made up any excuse about anything that doesn't please him so I guess he still have right to beat his wife. What do you think guys ?

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[34] Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance): for Allah is Most High, Great (above you all).
This is it! Thats one of the things that annoy me more than anything, its simply putting down half of society's individuals and practically eliminating them. An easy way to control women, beat them if you need to...In modern standers, this should be a big shame but the continuing falling back of Islamic society will still allow for that. As a Muslim I am really sorry but there isn't much that I can do about it either...I always try to do something but anything short of awareness and education for every woman will not do it. Some serious feminist movement needs to raise awareness and liberate woman is the Islamic world, I'm sure that it will happen with time...

Yah, one more thing. The story of creation in Islam blamed women for "disappointing" act of Adam eating from the forbidden school, resulting in the exile of Adam. I don't know, in Arabic literature there a good portion about "Kayd al Nisa2" which is the wickedness of women....Just a thought, I'm not really sure if that kind of strucuralist thinking is really aplicable here, any ideas???? Just a thought, I'm not really sure if that kind of thinking is really applicable here, any ideas???? The Quran is literature after all, right?

On a side notice, I'm sorry about the incoherence in my last comment, I was very sleepy when I wrote it :)
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Back to Islam, yes the Arabic language is a big part and thats why I think that it is Arab's job to reform Islam. The problem is that most Arabs got other issues to worry about now, there are some signs of moderation but still not enough. Change will come, I'm sure about that...

sufian when you said "thats why I think that it is Arab's job to reform Islam" i was shocked but i was more than happy to hear that............. do you really think that could happen??? im asking this as a turkishman (ie non-arabic ex-muslim)...

when i was in university we had a course: "interpretation of quran" .everybody in class must interpret an Ayah from quran i choosed 34 nesa. most student in that class were female . when i read the Aiah and translated it to Persian i realized that most of them even didn't know about it. a few of them just wanted to justify Islam in some ways and the rest just laughed at it .(i think the only atheist in that class was me)
when the master(the mullah) wanted justify Islam and make vague the real meaning of ayah i threat him to mention another Ayah (234 bagharah) which says "women are men's farm and men can enter their farm in each direction that they want" after this threat he became silent and said nothing until end of the class.

The quran ,unfortunately is completely biased in favor of men.From verses pertaining to total sexual domination over women ,"Your women are tilth for you (to cultivate) so go to your tilth as ye will, and send (good deeds) before you for your souls, and fear Allah, and know that ye will (one day) meet Him." [Qur'an 2:223]
to verses pertaining to disciplining women with violence like chapter 4 (An-Nisa), verse 34:
“ Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and beat them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great."

it is really sad how religion is just a cover for men to subjugate women .

Islam treats women very bad. If you ask this to religious muslim women, they will say..Islam only gives protection to women..Islam only gives freedom. That is the biggest joke ever.
And as for that sentence -- " If the woman disobey her husband then he has the right to beat her up when is necessary." That onething is enough to know how great is Islam. Womens are not given freedom in Islam. Many of the religious muslim womens living caged life. I mean..like..how some animals are living inside cage. That same way....some muslim womens lives...staying in home only always...no enjoyment.Those strict mens control them. Now that is not any kind of love. Women and men..both should be free,no strict rules.
In saudi, if a women gets raped..she have to provide 4 men witnesses. Now tell me what the hell is that ? I dont know in how many muslim countries this rule is there. So 4 mens should see her getting raped ?? Does this makes any sense ? If she fails to provide witness, she will be given worst punishments. But mens enjoy.They can marry 4 womens.Ive read news in real news sites in online. Women given 100 lashes because she got raped.My goodness...poor womens. :( There is no one to save them. These are too much.They say Islam treats men and women equally. That is another big joke.

I was raised xtian and have very little exposure to Islam. I had an encounter with Muslim women who were treated as prescribed by the Qur'an. They were in a meeting for women that had drug addictions. This girl's story was horrible. Her family brought her to the US to marry a man. They married and he became involved with drugs. He would beat on her if she did not use drugs too. When he got in trouble with the law her father and his family decided it was her fault that he became an addict. He divorced her using that as a excuse, she was pregnant. Her father took her back and made it clear that she was a burden and she was lucky they were not back home. Her and her mother were not to leave the house, use the phone, have any contact with anyone outside the family. She was having problems with drug withdrawals and her mother was brave enough to sneak out of the house to get help from a neighbor. The neighbor found the meeting and arranged for a cab.
I have never known two people so afraid. They acted like they were being watched by her father. The slightest noise would startle them. They were terrified that he would get home early and find them gone. We tried to talk them into letting us take them to a shelter. They were to frightened to try. When the meeting was over we learned that did not know where they lived. I couldn't fathom such a thing at the time.
They arrived in town at the airport was brought to the house and never allowed to leave. They were told if they would learn their address or use the phone they would be punished. We tried everything to figure out where they lived. But they did not know. We tried to convince them to stay they left any way. It was a not-so-good neighborhood and we were worried. We tried to find them but couldn't.
I often asked if anyone ever heard from them again but no one ever did.
I can't help but wonder about them all the time. I fear the worst has happened. And not by the people in the neighborhood either.
I know that it's not like that for all but if it just happens once it's one time to many.
I am not very familiar with the Qur'an but I know that the Bible I held onto for so long is actually not that far off when it comes to women. And yes the game is rigged.