Hi. I have had two intimate experiences with someone whom I care a lot about. Some things are concerning me.

He has told me that in the past he used steroids. He used them quite heavily (10 years ago). He has a slim body and has muscular arms. However, he has very sagging skin everywhere. This is not an issue for me as I'm not someone who cares about someone's outwardly appearance to that level.

While we are having sex, he loses his erection. It happens frequently throughout our love making. He says, ''It will come back. This is common for me.'' It does eventually come back. He is very enthusiastic in bed and for his age of 32, I'm surprised at how enthusiastic it is. Although, I love the attention, I end up leaving his place feeling raw!

He told me that he's had near-kidney failure due to the steroids. I spend a weekend with him recently and he rarely went to the toilet. So rarely, I noticed it.

He was very absent-minded to the point of it being alarming to me.

My question is this. Are these symptoms of a current abuser of steroids? Or could it be that the steroids he used 10 years ago are still affecting him? I'm indeed concerned as if he is addicted, I have to make some decisions.

Unless he admits that these issues are in fact issues then he probably won't have the drive to go and get blood work done to see that everything is in order. I'd be encouraging him to do so, especially if it's effecting your relationship. Blood work tells everything. It could be something minor, it could be something he's dealt with for the past ten years and does so in his own way.

One thing to understand here is that steroids are not physiologically addictive, like other banned substances. The "addictive" nature of steroids stems from the adherence to an enhanced physical appearance, increased strength, etc.

The erection issue should be pretty simple to fix. First of all, he needs to quit masturbating if he is doing so...obviously masturbating greatly reduces a man's sensitivity during sex. Not only that, but it also conditions the man to be sexually aroused in the absence of a woman. His sexual activity should be limited to you. Your part, however, is to be completely comfortable and open with him sexually. If men have had some sexual related issues in the past, there is a bit of anxiety when they start sleeping with someone new. This only worsens the problem. Listen to what he wants and do your best to fulfill him in that area...things will get better. Lastly, he should strongly consider Cialis. Don't make his erection issues a big deal, just be there to do whatever you can to make him feel more comfortable.

The issue with urinating infrequently is not going to be related to steroids. Being that he has been off of them for 10 years, any damage he's caused his kidneys should be fully recovered as of years ago. Additionally, the absent-mindedness is not going to be related to steroids either. A person is never "absent-minded", rather the things they are thinking about are more important than the things going on around them. Require more of his attention, do more things to get his attention. Establish yourself as an important part of his life to attend to. Sorry to say this, but we don't respond to things that don't mean much to us....the solution: mean more to him.

from what I have heard kidneys do not recover fully like your liver does. Also very detailed expensive blood work is really the only way to tell whats up with his erection issues. I know you have to get estrogen levels checked free testosterone checked Lh hormone levels checked all this other weird shit to. I think some good old viagra sounds like it could fix the problem though as long as viagra isnt to hard on his kidneys.

I have all these issues and it's due to low test. the bathroom thing could be an enlarged prostate. starting heavily at 22 probably fucked him up badly. and even if he wants to do steroids, I hate to tell you this, but you not liking it is very unlikely to stop it

I have all these issues and it's due to low test. the bathroom thing could be an enlarged prostate. starting heavily at 22 probably fucked him up badly. and even if he wants to do steroids, I hate to tell you this, but you not liking it is very unlikely to stop it