Levi Johnston Experiencing Penis-Size Crisis

Oh, no! Frisky favorite Levi Johnston is having some type of penis-related existential crisis prior to his upcoming nudie Playgirl pictorial. The New York Postreports that Levi is worried about the size of his pecker. “We hear that the father of Sarah Palin’s grandson has been telling folks at the magazine he is worried about how his manhood may look during the shoot.” What if he’s a grower, not a shower? What if when he takes it all off, he doesn’t measure up? The purported shoot location is, unsurprisingly, an ice rink (nice, er, puck?), and rumor has it Levi is worried the chill may cause some unflattering shrinkage. Levi’s man-friend Tank says it ain’t so, but perhaps an on-set fluffer would be in order? [New York Post]