Method actor kills man during crime re-enactment

Calls are growing for the police to abandon the use of Method actors in crime re-enactments after a Cambridge man was killed in an identical murder that occurred on the same spot one week earlier.

Actor Chris Noakes, 34, of Impington, Cambridgeshire, was standing in for murder victim Dennis Rooden, who was viciously bludgeoned to death with a blunt instrument seven days ago. But in a chillingly accurate reconstruction of the original crime, a fellow thespian emerged from behind a bus shelter and battered Noakes to the floor, killing him instantly. ‘This is a truly shocking development,’ said Chief Inspector Colin Lewis. ‘We now have a second murder on our hands and we are not even sure if the crimes were committed by the same bloke.’

Health and Safety Officers have criticized the use of Method actors in murder reconstructions as their devotion to realism can result in a failure to hold back at the crucial moment. But many respected thespians have paid tribute to the utter professionalism of the actors who took part in the tragic re-enactment. ‘Chris loved acting and literally gave his life for his craft,’ said an Equity spokesman. ‘And all credit to his assailant too; he now faces lifetime imprisonment – but that is the price he was prepared to pay for this utterly convincing performance.’

The name of the method actor who killed his colleague remains a mystery, and police are now looking for a Caucasian male of medium height in his mid-thirties. In order to help jog people’s memories, some of the victim’s Method acting colleagues have been persuaded to stage a re-enactment at exactly the same time next week.