last night, i watched "a series of unfortunate events" and was deeply intrigued by the moral of the story. in the movie, three siblings were orphaned and tormented by a crazy, money-seeking relative who makes their lives miserable. throughout the movie, each child had an amazing characteristic that they used selflessly in efforts to help their siblings survive through the madness of their circumstances. at the end of the movie, it was noted that they could easily label their lives as a series of unfortunate events; however, it depends on how you look at the situation. if you looked at it from another perspective, specifically looking at each child's character, they shone through each situation. therefore, their lives could be noted fortunate, despite their circumstances.

interestingly, it was a moral that i needed to hear last night. in a struggle with sin, it is easy for me to dispell my life as unfortunate, stagnant, or even worthless. fortunately, God doesn't see my life that way. he wants me to look past my series of unfortunate events and see the small things that shine through my circumstances. he wants me to look past my failures and my hardships and realize that there is more to the story-- there is a fortune in the making.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

A man known as disease He's shaking all the hands of the people he meets And now you just don't see me anymore Well, I've been losing everything You just don't see me anymore I'll say goodbye Since you left, she's a mess She regrets all the things that she could've said But we fall asleep, never think about anything We wake to the sound of a phone as it hits the ground And now you just don't see me anymore Well, I've been losing everything You just don't see me anymore I'll say goodbye And, oh at the wake, at the wake I will turn to see a face Just a face, just a face So surrounded by a name What a name, what a name And we never want to change What you gave, what you gave Never wanna let go So surround me I need anything and you're everything I want to live like I did Before all this hit To sleep in your arms To think we'll never fall apart You know it's, you know it's such a drag To live your life for a heart attack To never get a second chance To say goodbye To say goodbye I'll never get to try You just don't see me anymore I've been losing everything I'll say goodbye

Thursday, June 5, 2008

last night, i finally decided to watch hotel rwanda, which is a film that encapsulates the genocide that took place in rwanda in the 90's. my reaction was not at all what i had expected. after the movie, i prayed for God to come back quickly for the first time in my life. not that i've never wanted him to come back quickly, i guess it's just that i have never been so moved by the inhumanity in the world. noting that, i was upset because there are two sides of the story.

on side one, there were the hutu people who were murdering the tsotsis. as i watched the movie, i couldn't help but think of specific lyrics to "oh my God" by jars of clay:

we all have the chance to murderwe all feel the need for wonderwe still want to be remindedthat the pain is worth the plunder...

...babies underneath their bedshospitals that cannot treatall the wounds that money causesall the comforts of cathedralsall the cries of thirsty childrenthis is our inheritanceall the rage of watching mothersthis is our greatest offense

OH MY GOD.

the horrifying fact of the matter is that we are all capable of doing what these people did. this is our humanity; this is our sin. how could we let it get so far?

on side two is the scarier scenario. what on earth could be scarier than murder? apathy. there was a specific scene where the main character, paul, thanked a news reporter for recording the terrible acts of genocide. paul was hopeful because he thought that presenting a recording like that would bring some sort of intervention from other countries. as soon as he said it, the reporter (played by joaquin phoenix) said that there would be no help. he said that people would simply "say how sad it is, then keep eating their dinners".

how is it that we live in a place that could be so blinded by comfort? i feel as though we are lying to ourselves when we bypass news like this. how could we live with knowledge of what's happening in the world and not do anything about it?

i couldn't sleep last night. as i sat in my nice, comfortable bed, i couldn't help but think of why i am here, and not there. i couldn't stop thinking about the little girl across the world who is hiding under her bed because someone is going to rape and murder her. i couldn't stop thinking about the 6 thousand kids who die from water related diseases PER DAY! how do we live with ourselves?

God, until you return and fix this mess, help us to do everything in our power to make a difference in this sick world!