Really, what the question title states. In my language there's a more "flowery" phrase to say "size doesn't matter". It would roughly translate to "even a small clown can work in the big top" – I'm looking for something that tries to maintain the wit of the "small"/"big" antithesis.

It's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean. comes (no pun intended) to mind...although I do find the Slovakian saying quite humorous.
–
JSanchezMar 13 '14 at 17:22

2

I was just wondering did you have one yourself ;) To extend on JSanchez's suggestion - It's not the size of the boat nor the motion in the ocean, it's whether or not the captain can stay in port long enough for all the passengers to get off
–
RonanMar 13 '14 at 17:23

10

@RonanMurphy "It's not the size of the boat, nor the motion of the ocean but rather how well the guy uses his penis." That's how my grandmother used to say it. ;-p
–
David MMar 13 '14 at 17:33

1

@DavidM or indeed, "It's not the size of the boat, but does the guy not know how to use his hands and mouth? Oh you poor girl, you need to get him some education".
–
Jon HannaMar 14 '14 at 11:22

2

A related question: Is there any expression used in English for this that doesn't have a stronger effect on making the speaker immediately less sexually attractive than their having a small penis did?
–
Jon HannaMar 14 '14 at 12:58