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Friday, January 20, 2012

The Cat is INNOCENT!

Once again, the cat is being excused of doing something she didn't do. The Woman says I'm a sloppy eater and she presents Exhibit A. I ax you, do you see a mess? I don't. She says I even get my food all over the wall! She's losing the few marbles she had.

Exhibit A: You're killing me, Woman. You did it, not me.

I answer that she throws the food at me instead of neatly spooning it into my dish. Besides, I counter, how do I know you ever clean my placemat. Dealing a low blow, TW presents Exhibit B, my placement in the early morning.

It's a conspiracy to make us feel bad about ourselves. My tray has to be washed off every morning. I say, So there are some crumbs. So what? Leave 'em there. I'll get around to them eventually. Or some ants will or something.

Hmm, I see you are flaunting your team. I guess the Human better get something together for tomorrow. It's raining here today. The Stick might get a little muddy. Them guys will have to get their pretty tight uniforms all dirty, eh?

Well, CK, if they'd feed us the RIGHT way, there'd never be any mess at all, at all. But no, they just throw the food down, and the kitteh is left to try to make a meal of it. And then they blame us for a mess. Sigh!

Well, CK, I know this will lower me in your estimation, but I have to be honest: I am a groundcat. I am the only kitty the Human ever has had that does not really hang out in the high spots. Oh sure, I jump up on stuff once in awhile, but heights are not my thrill. Also, I am amazingly sure-fotted and delicate. I have NEFUR, NEFUR, NEFUR broken a single thing. EFUR. Shocking, isn't it?Somehow, I do not think you can say the same.

So tomorrow will tell the tale, eh? I am of course rooting for the Niners for all the usual reasons, but also cause I'd love to be able to leave my JOE banner up for two more weeks!

I know the feeling CK! Mom accuses me of scattering my kibble all over. Yeah, I have a placemat under my bowl, but it's so small! I do my best to clean it up, but what's a dog to do? I blame my loose lips! Besides, it gives Toby cat something to do, barooo!

Actually, if the truth be told, I'z a messy eater...I end up wearing my Num-Nums and carrying tiny crumbs of crunchies around on my chin. So if you were a messy eater CK, it would be ok...of course that isn't the case so excuse me for even mentioning it.

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