I’ve been thinking a lot lately about timing. Specifically about the timing around when to stay or when to go.
When to leave churches…
When to end a romance…
When to move out of the house…
When to step away from a friendship…

The challenging thing about life, is that it’s a moving target. We are always changing, always growing.

That’s why the yogis tell you balance is not static. That’s why we need flow. That’s why “organic” is a buzz word.

The thing is, when you are growing, there’s a period where it’s helpful to stay put awhile longer. To get a little more shelter from the storm. To rely on some familiar resources.

In the best case scenario, staying put means that iron sharpens iron, and the friction you experience in the old place helps you form your new views.
Remaining in the struggle for awhile can grow your communication skills. Being present to the process can help you refine the language you use to describe your new way of seeing the world. The challenge of a shifting relationship can teach you to listen as well as to speak.

There’s good reason sometimes, to stay.

Then again, it doesn’t always work that way.

Stay too long past the expiration date — with a person, in a place, amongst a tribe–and dysfunction sets it. We can develop a kind of perverse pleasure in staying mad. In staying stuck. In staying put.

You get to feel superior, when you are the one “right” voice in the midst of a community who is stuck in the dark ages.
You don’t have to risk the great unknown.
You can pretend you have a hand to hold although really, you’re just the cheese standing alone.

Eventually though, it’s time.

Time to leave the tribe of your youth.
Time to shape your own path.
Time to be yourself again, all the way out to your edges.

Maybe it’s time? Kenneth and Joey say it so well:

Did someone hurt you many years ago? Did someone desert you when you needed them the most? And the pain stayed with you everywhere you’d go, And it’s been so long now but you just can’t seem to let it go,

Maybe it’s time. Maybe it’s time.Maybe it’s time to tell it you don’t need it anymore.

Did you lose someone that you loved? Did they move far off or do you picture them above? There’s an emptiness inside you and it’s worse when you’re alone, And it feels so heavy now like you’re carrying the weight of a stone,

Maybe it’s time.Maybe it’s time.Maybe it’s time to tell it you won’t carry it anymore.

We ain’t got a long time and there’s a lot to do But first you gotta decide to leave some things behindMaybe it’s time.Maybe it’s time.Maybe it’s time to leave your chains behind.

Are you ready to leave behind the things that do not serve you well?
Can you take the step over the threshold?
Will you reconstruct that which you most value?

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Making a change? Rebuilding your beliefs? Phew! You really are on an amazing journey. I'd be happy to travel with you awhile. Click here to learn more about my mini and full-size coaching packages. (It's like I always say, "There's nowhere to go, but together.")

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Leaving your old tribe? Ready to build a new soulful community? Soulretreats walks you through the goodbye/hello process. Click here for a slideshow.

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“When it comes to shopping for beliefs people are keeping their religious credit cards in their wallets. Rachelle leads without forcing, helps people avoid religious boredom and does it all with wisdom and a touch of ‘élan.”

-- Jim Henderson, author, The Resignation of Eve

"With vision and heart, Rachelle brings her passionate commitment to soul-care to life, creating a nest for creative spiritual misfits looking for that just-right fit. It’s a gift of love and inspiration and lights a powerful way.”

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Testimonials

“When I turn to Rachelle for help, her words are like the fine tuning of my soul–the interpretation of a truth that is sometimes hard to find. It’s golden to be heard and understood.”

-- Flock Member, Tracey Henton

“I think it says a lot that I refer to this community mentally as ‘my Flock’. There’s a sense when logging in of kicking back and relaxing, knowing that no-one is judging or trying to trip you up.”

-- Flock Member Tess Giles Marshall, Pilgrim's Moon

“When it comes to shopping for beliefs people are keeping their religious credit cards in their wallets. Rachelle leads without forcing, helps people avoid religious boredom and does it all with wisdom and a touch of ‘élan.”

-- Jim Henderson, author, The Resignation of Eve

"With vision and heart, Rachelle brings her passionate commitment to soul-care to life, creating a nest for creative spiritual misfits looking for that just-right fit. It’s a gift of love and inspiration and lights a powerful way.”

-- Jamie Ridler, certified life coach

"Rachelle seems to always know what I need to read. I savor her Flock emails like a piece of caramel. Then I give a *sigh* of comfort."