May December is a reference to the age gap between my husband and me we are 24 years apart. He's from England. I grew up in Utah. We now live in the suburbs north of Chicago! We recently completed our family, we have two little girls and two little boys! Please join us while I document our crazy family!

Friday, April 21, 2017

I am Atheist

I am Atheist. I am very proud of it. It is who I am.

I was raised a Mormon and I always had questions about religion. The timeline in the bible never made sense. A god who expected humans to be perfect, seemed cruel. A god who “gave” us sexual urges but told us not to act on them, seemed even more cruel. None of it made sense, but I went with the flow so I could fit in (I also was afraid of what my parents would say/do if I expressed my doubts, rightly so). Particularly as a teenager, I felt like I had no choice. It was not until I was excommunicated for wanting to keep my own child, and enjoying the sex that I had to make her, that I began to really wonder if there was a god at all.

I do not believe in any form of god. For a while I considered myself agnostic. I was unsure if a god did or did not exist. If a god did exist I knew he wasn’t the god Mormons worship, who claim he cares what type of underwear you put on in the morning.

Mormons idea of god also tells you it is not ok to judge, but at the same time tells Bishops and other church authorities to judge people and kick them out of their church. The majority of Mormons are not welcoming to people who have “sinned”. Many other religions react similarly to “sinners”. It is difficult for me to understand why people who are religious are so judgmental and have a, “I am better than you attitude”. Shouldn’t you have a lot of love for the people who need it most or are “struggling with faith”? (as religious people would put it)

The more I thought about religion the less it made sense. The more history and science I studied, the less I thought god existed at all.

God, is something humans created when we didn’t know the earth was a sphere. We didn’t know the earth revolved around the sun. There is a lot we still do not know. God was created to fill in the gaps when we knew much less than we do now. We still do not know everything, but at this point, there is no need to have something to fill in the gaps. “I don’t know” is a perfectly valid answer. Not knowing and trying to figure it out is much better than making up a fairy tale to somewhat explain, and never trying to figure it out.

Yes I am dying my eyebrows naked, because why not. Aphoto I never would have published when religious.

I believe in science. There is overwhelming evidence that points to life evolving from small organisms millions and millions of years ago. We were not created a few thousand years ago by a god with the flick of his wrist. Anyone who lets their belief in something magical get in the way of science, needs to rethink their beliefs.

If you believe god used the big bang to create the universe, or used evolution as a way to create humans, that is a cop out. If you go back that far and say, “that is where god’s hand is” you will realize that god does not need to exist. The universe and earth does not have to have a creator.

I believe humans are good. I believe we are born with empathy. We do not need religion to make us good. We should not be taught being good gets us a reward after we die. We should be good and nice because it is the right thing to do. Yes, there are people who are bad people, and they need help, not from religion though, help from doctors and physiologists. The average human is nice and kind, because it is how we have evolved.

I became an atheist in just the past year or two. Atheism can be a hard pill to swallow. It is difficult to come to terms with the fact that there is no life after this. The life we are living today is all we have. There is no afterlife, no heaven, no hell, just now and here.

The realization that this life is all I have, has made me a better person. I do not worry about the little things any more. I will never be perfect. I do not need to live by any silly religious rules to get a better life when I die. There is nothing when you die. I love the life I have. I make the most of it every single day because I know it is all I have. This earth and life is so amazing. I plan on enjoying every possible moment of it until the day I become worm food, and get recycled back into this beautiful universe.