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Timehop reminded me today that a year ago, before Tinder limited your likes and charged you by age, that I was swiping right for everyone. Because I am both a confident woman, and perhaps insane, I greeted my matches with “I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!” (Hey.. you never know! I kind of wish I had the guts to do this in person!)

The responses (at least for the first day that Timehop has shown me) are pretty funny:

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“Ha u will need to wait longer”

“I like every profile”

“Be real”

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“Wow. Hahahaha. I feel like you should get something better than me if you waited so long.”

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“And I you. Welcome to destiny!”

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“I think you are the first girl to message me there must be something wrong with you.”

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“There you are! I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“How does it feel to find me?”

“There’s a huge weight lifted off my shoulders!”

“What are you going to do now?”

“I’m going to Disney World!”

“Or my apartment. It’s been called Disney world before.”

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“I’ve been waiting my entire life for you!”

“Wow that’s really good luck then!”

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“Soo you love me?”

“No.”

“Let’s bang.”

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“It’s you! I’ve been waiting my entire life for you!”

“If I had a nickel..”

“Then you’d have a nickel?”

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“I’ve been waiting my entire life for you!”

“hope i don’t disappoint. (914)###-####”

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“There you are! I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“Boobs?”

“Oh, you have boobs? Nevermind.”

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“I’ve been waiting my whole life for you!”

“Hahaa hard line to follow.. but yes ma’am, at your servicce. When can I start?”