Laura McLean: Love and flowers go hand in hand

Sunday

Feb 10, 2013 at 12:01 AM

For the true romantic, flowers are the ultimate wooing device on this very loverly of holidays. Palpable and fragrant, their petals speak a tender language all their own, and their impact is certain to be felt.

Laura McLean

How do I love thee? ...

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? ...

She walks in beauty like the night...

With love as inspiration, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, William Shakespeare and Lord Byron all knew a thing or two about phrasing words. That is a skill that can go a long way on Valentine's Day, and will send people hunting down just the right ones in greeting cards or crafting their own.

For the true romantic, flowers are the ultimate wooing device on this very loverly of holidays. Palpable and fragrant, their petals speak a tender language all their own, and their impact is certain to be felt.

Whether it's the first or the 50th time you choose flowers for your beloved, it needn't confound you. However you should be willing to put a little thought into the act. As an example, consider two men seeking the affection of the same woman.

In the novel, Sense and Sensibility: Marianne Dashwood is sought by two men — Mr. Willoughby and Colonel Brandon — who each on the same day give her very different bouquets; the first handpicked, the other, an exquisite, sophisticated arrangement. Which is the most thoughtful? Which bespeaks the most passion? Who can say? Marianne, who is more directed by feelings than logic, favors the simpler bouquet because it is from the more dashing man, never mind he barely put any thought into the act. In fact, a handful of weeds would have stoked her infatuation. When she finally comes to her senses, she marries the quiet, though vastly more honorable Brandon. I often think Marianne could have saved a lot of unnecessary angst and subsequent depression by accepting the more thoughtful bouquet at the get-go.

A moot point, but the idea here is that flowers are a vivid expression of your love, whether you haven't given your feelings words or whether you say "I love you" on a daily basis. They can ignite interest, fuel desire, and spark anew the fire in your beloved's eyes. Flowers are like a hormonal injection to a tired, complacent relationship. In the game of love, giving flowers is pure power play and will go a lot further than say"». chocolates or dinner out or nothing at all. Flowers are food for the soul — they stir the senses and remain a visible reminder of one's love, long after the last oyster's been digested. A meal is easy to forget, but flowers remain imprinted on the heart. For those on a budget, the gesture can be as simple as a single stem.

If you're hitting the re-dial every St. Valentine's and going with the same assortment consider the options. Red roses, lurid as they are, can be borderline cliché. They are the choice of the masses signifying passion and true love. It's difficult to knock that out of our collective consciousness and go with say, a Gerbera Daisy. But that is what my husband did — unwittingly — 23 years ago.

I can't recall the whys and wherefores — maybe it was the fact that we lived in a little town on the Italian Riviera, but I won't ever forget that bouquet — a mix of red and yellow Gerbera daisies! Truth be told, many years later, when I see those colors together, it flames my heart.

The preferences of flowers is always illuminating and I think it usually relates to an emotional chord, rather than the practical. For this reason people will often keep the same theme year after year. Sheryl Piazza, an English teacher at Greater New Bedford Vocational Technical High School, has a penchant for repeated gesture in the form of the Rubrum Lily, a showy flower with a tantalizing scent. "It was the flower of my wedding bouquet, 20 years ago, this June. When my husband gives them to me, it's reminiscent of our courtship."

Frank Gracia, a self-confessed hopeless romantic also holds to the tried and true. "If you know the language of flowers, you have to give red roses to the one you love," says the Voc-Tech psychology teacher. "Even though you know prices will go up on Valentine's Day "» it's the most romantic flower!"

But I maintain that each Valentine's Day doesn't have to be the same. Go for something fresh and new that you feel matches your lover's tastes or personality. Research the meanings. For example, stephanotis signifies marital happiness and the forget-me-not is emblematic of true love. In Claire Powell's The Meaning of Flowers, there are numerous plants associated with love: blue violet, myrtle, rose, coreopsis, balsam, acacia, honeysuckle, mallow, red tulip, campion, purple lilac, ambrosia, honey flower and pinks, each with a specific label of love (ardent, secret, slighted, even pretended as embodied by the catchfly). You can have a field day putting together a meaningful bouquet!

Because cut flowers are fleeting, potted plants might be the way toward establishing a substantial, longer lasting relationship. You live and grow with it, keeping it alive, just like your love.