Keep This Cursed Mind-Reading Device Away From Me

Look, I know the urge to compare every new tech-related advancement with Black Mirror is a cliché, but bear with me here. Researchers at MIT have unveiled a new device called AlterEgo, which allows you to communicate with a computer using nothing but your mind, if you’re into the sort of thing. (I’m not.)

Four electrodes under the white plastic device make contact with the skin and pick up the subtle neuromuscular signals that are triggered when a person verbalizes internally. When someone says words inside their head, artificial intelligence within the device can match particular signals to particular words, feeding them into a computer.

Testing has revealed a 92 percent accuracy; in comparison, voice-recognition software tends to be about 95 percent accurate. And while right now the functions are pretty basic — like selecting content on a Roku — the end goal is to allow a person to seamlessly and silently communicate with an AI assistant. (It could potentially be very helpful for those with disabilities that prevent speech-based communication.)

But the last thing I want is a computer to be privy to my internal monologue, which is usually a combination of “[imaginary argument with someone who wronged me years ago],” “dog!,” and “[the lyrics to “Thunder Road”].”