I like this one: "By definition, a program is an entity that is run by the computer. It talks directly to the CPU and the OS. Code that does not talk directly to the CPU and the OS, but is instead run by some other program that does talk directly to the CPU and the OS, is not a program; it's a script." Here's the other eleven.

Nobody said those opinions had to be valid; only that they had to be controversial.

That doesn't make any sense either. If you don't need to make sense just for the sake of being controversial, then how about these?

1. Everyone should always write code using two toes of their choice but only from their left foot.
2. No function should ever be more than 82 lines of code, except on a Tuesday when they should be no more than 81 and 83 lines long.
3. Every single programmer should learn COBOL. No exceptions.
4. Always name your variables as anagrams of the word "hexaphene"
5. Never compile your code after dark.
6. The letter 'y' should be banned from use in Java.