There’s a long, storied history of the pawn going home on Big Brother. For those who don’t watch the show, the pawn is the person put up for elimination, but with the promise from the Head of Household that they’re fine, they’re not going home. Oh no, not you! Not the plan at all. Really. Of course, said pawn is often the one sent packing with no clue as to what just happened. (Also known as a “blindside” after being “backdoored.”)

And even though they’re only one week in, the cutthroats houseguests on Big Brother Canada have already pulled off their first blindside. Danielle, the busty blond from Alberta, was given the ol’ heave-ho on Thursday’s elimination vote. Needless to say, she never saw it coming.

Okay, here’s a quick catch-up of how we got here, compiling events from the past two episodes: As Head of Household, Jillian nominates Aneal and Gary for elimination, even though she was leaning towards Danielle. Her showmance, Emmett, tells her that Aneal is a bigger threat, despite being her friend. Aneal, for his part, tries to convince Jillian that there’s a four-man alliance (Emmett, Tom, Alex and Andrew) and part of that pact is that each male has aligned themselves with a female.

Gary has his eye on the prize in the Veto Competition.

Aneal, the 21-year-old from Richmond Hill (“It’s not Toronto!” shrieks Gary), immediately starts working on the sympathy vote. He sobs to Jillian that he feels betrayed, making her feel “this big,” she says, but in the diary room, it’s another story. “I tried to cry in front of as many people as I could, using their emotions to get the pity vote,” a dry-eyed Aneal tells the cameras. (Emmett, meanwhile, can only laugh at the tears. “This game is not for the weak.”)

Gary, meanwhile, plays the drama queen role to the hilt, going into mourning with a black veil draped over his head. But his fashion sense hides an athletic ability honed by playing a variety of sports in his youth. “Physical challenges aren’t an issue for me,” Gary tells the camera and he’s right. The reigning Glitter King easily takes the Power of Veto competition, which involves chucking snowballs to tip over snowmen while balanced on a narrow beam.(Of course, the win doesn’t happen without some snark: “I don’t know if he’s just good with balls, but he’s doing a great job,” Tom snipes.)

This means that HOH Jillian has to “put up another pawn.” And surprise, surprise: Danielle offers herself up. Her reasoning? If you are going to do gamble on being a pawn, do it early when you’re more likely to stay in the house, as alliances aren’t yet rock solid. “But on the inside, I’m stirring up the pot ‘cause I don’t like her and she has to goooo,” Danielle tells the camera of her shaky trust with Jillian. “I’m taking one for the team, but she owes me one.”

Her plan (if she stays in the house) is to call in her favour at a later date and take out Jillian when she is a pawn. And we all know how that turns out. Gary takes himself down, Jillian puts Danielle up and the scheming begins.

As a fan of the show, I am shocked at how openly the showmances are playing out. “Emmett and Jillian are inseparable,” Liza says, as we’re “treated” to footage Emmett kissing his girl’s neck and putting his hands on her butt . . . in front of everyone else in the kitchen. Tom, who says he’s cool with it, but wants to make sure his alliance with Emmett is solid, is no better. He’s hooked up with Liza . . . with some reservations. “I adore her friendship. I adore her gameplay and her strategy,” he says. “My true allegiance in this game is to the milkman, Emmett.”

And, of course, Alec and Topaz have been together since pretty much the beginning. “It’s like a teenage party gone wild,” Aneal sniffs. Liza seems like she is in deep with Tom (“I don’t fall for boys. Boys fall for me!”), and Jillian holds off smooching Emmett (“All my friend are watching!”). But the substitute teacher just can’t resist a poorly tattooed dairy farmer and succumbs to his milky charms in the shower. Yeah, like that’s less embarrassing than making out on the couch.

Alec, while he’s enjoying his time with Topaz, is in a secret alliance with Peter, and has been since Night One. “The Shield” (cross arms in an X in front of you when saying) is determined to make it to the end and to pull a prank a week. This time out: let’s pretend it’s Alec’s birthday. Yeah, it’s as lame as it sounds.

But there’s another alliance in the works, and it could be a good one. Liza tells Jillian that she’s worried “the boys wont’ take us to the end.” Jillian reasons it’s good to have someone to lean on in the house. “If the ox and the ram want to carry us to the end, so be it,” Liza says of their boyfriends, Tom and Emmett. So the girls will seemingly pair up with their boys, but will turn on them at an opportune time. In a delicious meta moment, Jillian asks her hunky farmer boy, “Am I being played, Emmett?” as she rubs his shirtless back. Oh, snap!

Liza, the dummy, though, goes and tells Peter about her and Jillian’s chat. He passes the info on to Emmett and Alec. Why? Well because there is yet another alliance afoot: Quattro, which is composed of Emmett, Alec, Peter and Tom. (Thankfully, there’s no lame arm signal for the group, unlike The Shield, which Peter unleashes every single time he mentions the name.) “The four of us should be able to run the house for as long as we please,” Peter says. And sadly, there’s not much organization or strategy going on among the girls to provide any pushback.

Aneal works the house with tears after being put up for eviction.

Although Emmett and Peter push for Aneal to go, Tom and Alec reason that Danielle is more dangerous, as she and Gary will team up to come after Tom & Co. Tom wants Aneal to be the fifth man in, so the group will have the numbers, if the girlfriends vote with them. Aneal gladly signs on, but Peter tells him he needs to get Talla and maybe Suzette on board. But Quattro should be wary of its latest addition: “A deal is only a deal until I see fit,” Aneal tells the camera.

Gary, Suzette and Danielle run the numbers and the nominee says she feels pretty safe. But Aneal chatting up Peter and leaves her uneasy, as it should.

To pass the time, Gary plays dress up with the girls, dolling them up in outfits, doing their hair and makeup and parading them before the guys in a fashion show. Gary, of course, gets the pimp spot, working the runway in a micro mini and wig. Double snap!!

A quick change and Gary heads up to the HOH room and asks Jillian if Aneal is staying. She says she hasn’t, and Gary scores points: “Maybe you’re not in charge anymore.” Emmett plays dumb and Gary says he’s going to get to the bottom of who switched the votes to oust Danielle. Jillian, of course, was lying to Gary’s face, as she knows the score.

Before the vote, we get a clip trip of Tom’s constant quest for protein, Talla’s mighty farts, Topaz’s non-stop sleeping, Danielle’s burlesque routine and Gary’s constant posing. On to more serious matters: it’s time to vote. Aneal and Danielle both make a short speech, then the house votes. Alec, Tom, Topaz, AJ (remember him?), Liza, Emmett, Andrew and Peter vote to evict Danielle; Gary, Suzette and Talla cast their ballots for Aneal.

When host Arisa Cox announces the result, Danielle opens her mouth in shock, then starts crying. Gary tears up as well and gives her a hug, as does Talla and Suzette. No one else comes near her (although Topaz did get in a quick pat on the back) or says goodbye. Oh well, at least she got in some quality trash talk before she left. “I said some bad things about people and now I don’t feel bad about saying them,” she told Cox in her exit interview.

On to this week’s Head of Household. The 13 remaining players face off, trying to predict how the majority of houseguests answer a series of questions, such as “Who would you least want love advice from?” If a player answer doesn’t match that of the majority, they’re out. All the women are out early, plus Gary, and since the guys share one brain (answering a series of questions exactly the same), it comes down to a tiebreaker. How many litres of batter were used in the batter up challenge? Tom takes it with his guess of 1,700, closest to the actual amount of 3, 690 litres. Tom is modest in his victory, celebrating quietly. Ha! Have you seen this guy? Of course that’s not how he acted: there is much chest thumping, bro hugs and “Yeahs!” going on.

And expect a full week of testosterone, as Tom and his Quattro buddies decide who is going up on the block on Sunday. Will Tom push to break up Emmett and Jillian this early? Or is Gary Public Enemy No. 1? Let loose below with your predictions on what’s going to go down this week in the Big Brother Canada house.

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