The story of Simon Danczuk and 17-year-old Sophena Houlihan doesn’t stack up. I’ve been thinking about it long and hard now, and it makes very little sense why we should be pillorying a man who has seemingly fallen for the charms of a flirtatious young girl.

Before you read on, you should know, this is an opinion article entirely inspired by my intuition – nothing more. Frankly, I’ve never met Mr. Danczuk, and I would imagine our politics somewhat differ. But that should not stop us in the pursuit of the truth here.

Firstly, when you read the story, you can tell some things are very wrong. Here’s why:

SOPHENA HOULIHAN IS NOT ATTRACTIVE

I don’t know where Mr. Danczuk stands on this one, but I think Ms. Houlihan sounds like a dump truck, and has the looks to accompany it. Although the Sun has done its best job of making her look like a goody-two-shoes. Hiding the cleavage she likes to post pictures of, buttoning up her shirt to the top so she looks like an Amish wife. Classic stuff.

But come on, look at Mr. Danczuk’s other recent conquests, then look at Ms. Houlihan. It’s clear without her egging him on with words, he’d never have bothered trying it on with her in the first instance.

What am I getting at? That Mr. Danczuk was just a lonely old man, maybe in the wrong place, at the wrong time. I mean it’s not as if she’s Lolita is it? She looks more like Happy Eater to me.

Will she declare who egged her on to give the story to the Sun? How much, if anything, they’ve paid her? Let’s have some transparency on this please.

SOPHENA HOULIHAN IS HARDLY ‘YOUNG’

So Mr. Danczuk was in a position of power, and seemingly abused it. Yeah, fine, suspend him and investigate. If it can’t be proved that he leveraged his position for sex, he’s clear. Let’s not make it about her age.

The claim that Ms. Houlihan is somehow an innocent “child” who knew nothing of sex or intimacy before this sleazy MP came on by, cock-in-hand, is a joke.

Infantilising young adults like this is dangerous and sends the wrong message: “you aren’t old enough to think for yourself and realise the consequences of your actions”.

Look at the texts she sent him… “I’m quite turned on just thinking about it”… When he replies he’s horny, she says, “Good. That was my intention… another thought just popped into my head… of you [REDACTED]… moaning your name”.

And she was 17, an age at which Labour Lords wanted to let people vote in the European Union referendum. So wait a minute – is she underage or not? If Labour is now claiming 17 years old is a child, that would run contrary to party policy that plans to give 16 and 17 year olds the vote. Unless they’re headlining that paragraph of the manifesto, “Votes for Children”.

DANCZUK IS TREATED LIKE A CELEB, WHY?

Maybe it was his cleavage-selfie obsessed ex-wife. Maybe it is because he has been one of the few to stick his head above the parapet on the Westminster Paedophile Scandal. But I can’t help but notice it’s only since he did the latter that his own personal life has been shredded apart. Conspiracy theory, or as one political insider said to me: “Tit for tat”?

And speaking of tits, let’s look at Ms. Houlihan’s magic new Facebook Fan Page. Yes, that’s right. A Facebook Fan Page for a “News Personality” called Sophena Houlihan – where she appears to be doing her best impression of Ms. Karen Danczuk (ahem).

LABOUR AREN’T EXACTLY HEARTBROKEN

Danczuk is famously no fan of his party’s new regime under Jeremy Corbyn. And they’ve not exactly gone to bat for him on this.

“I can’t think of anyone who will shed a tear for him in Lancashire or Labour HQ. If either can find a way of getting rid of him, they will,” a party official told a national newspaper earlier.

That comment is so harsh – it goes so far – that it even begins to smell like a put-up job by Labour HQ themselves. Let’s see what happens with Ms. Houlihan’s career trajectory after this…

HAVE WE FORGOTTEN THE AGE OF CONSENT?

Sixteen. That’s the age of consent in the UK. If Sophena Dumptruck wanted to seduce a dirty old man, she’s well within her rights to try it on. It’s kind of obvious she knew what was going to happen by the Sun’s own video of her explaining it.

She says, “It was flirty… as it went on I was getting more attracted to him… I thought he was just nice… I didn’t really see the wrong side of it… Of course I feel a little bit bad, obviously because I’vedone the story and it’s put him in that situation”. [Emphasis added]

‘I’VE DONE THE STORY’

Sorry – what? “I’ve done the story”? That doesn’t sound like a phrase a member of the public would use about going through an inappropriate relationship with a Member of Parliament and then spilling her guts to the Sun over it. “Done the story”. Think about that in the context of the other stuff she’s said.