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Friday, April 11, 2008

little Freak

Along with the constant bellybutton poking, picking, and pinching, little kid has developed a new, perhaps even stranger quirk.

Now if he isn't hitching up his shirt to poke the bebo, he is pinching and twisting his own nipples aka nickles. Especially if he's angry, he likes to get a good handful of baby booby and PINCH, sometimes even with both hands. I also catch him mindlessly feeling himself up, a little pull here, a little twist there.

Charming, isn't it?

On an unrelated, but sort of related note, he drank some of that oil air freshener that you put the reeds in the other day while I was on the phone with LK.

And yes, all knowing smartasses, it WAS somewhere I thought he couldn't get it. I have come to discover that there is no such place.

He relocks the fridge lock after he's done perusing the goods. The chairs have to be brought out at the beginning of each meal, so that he can't use them for additional vertical leverage. The only thing that keeps him out of the cleaning supplies is a double knotted shoelace...and he's been studying that knot.

Please tell me by the time he's in college he'll have outgrown grabbing boobies, destroying property, and breaking into shit...

Jesus, Ashley, it could be every mother's worst nightmare; your son could grow up to be a climber. He'll live in a van, follow the weather, grow drears and speak in a language only understandable to his own kind. Oh, wait, he does that already....

I dunno, these things can settle in... my own little kid, youngest son anyhow, just turned 6, still has one finger, I do believe, permanently affixed up nostril and a hand, also permanently affixed, down his pants. He's a joy to take out!If anyone has any ideas how to break a boy of these repulsive habits, please let us all know.... God knows, I've tried.Somehow daughter child, almost 4, has never partaken(?) in any of these nasty habits?!?

I hope he gets past these adorable quirks. But if not, I can think of some fraternities where he'd fit right in. He'll have friends, others like him, and they'll have great adventures together, and as long as they don't get busted by the campus cops he'll be fine. ;)

My little one doesn't play with her own nipples... because I taught her to play with her Daddy's nipples! Whenever we're all laying in bed together, she'll lift up his shirt (if he's wearing one) and pinch and poke his nipples. She even sings/babbles a little nonsensical song with the word "nipples" in it while she is doing it. She saw me pinch his nipple through his shirt tonight and smiled really big and said, "Nipples!"My husband hates me for this, by the way!

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