5.10.2009

all ye, beware. big time emo in the house.

As days roll by, it has become saddening to think that you can’t really hold onto things, to people; those who cradled you and held you as a child, your role models for the true, the good and the beautiful; those that played both major and minor parts in defining your happiness, shaping your memories as an individual—all of them slowly receding to oblivion; preoccupied with their own individual sorrows.

Standing there, i thought, i was happy here, once. I was carefree and laughed in a way that real laughter should sound. I was a child here, once. Filled with joy and surrounded with love.

Now things are in shambles, rickety, and beyond repair. I don’t know what else to think. I don’t know what else to feel. This intensity is now making it apparent that i haven’t downed enough gsm blue this afternoon for me to feel the requisite numbness enough to compel me to lose touch with reality. Happy birthday to me.

back[seat]story

search gentle

my name is gentle

i am a hopeless romantic. i am a sucker for the written word. i like shakespeare, as much as madonna or xtina. i curse, weep and howl. but i also smile the sweetest of smiles and bellow ear-shattering laughters. i am a connoisseur of visual and aural feasts--of all things ethereal and sublime ; ghastly and profane. i am a son. a brother. a loyal friend. a doting uncle. i am a librarian who enjoys pigging-out on his fave food in silence. i am butter melting deliciously on your tongue. a camera-whore who flirts with the lens on like, a regular basis. i am yoga-smitten. i live in the present, and jazz is my religion; but i am a schemer just the same--i plan, i execute...i dare to live in waking dreams. i am tragedy and success. i am beauty and ugliness. shadow and light. agony and ecstasy. cold as ice, hot as fire. take a deep breath... i am gentle. pleased to meet you!