Chester Missing: The common (non)senselessness in SA

2013-12-03 10:00

Our politicians lack common sense like Radovan Krejcir lacks a conscience. Apparently, now the minister of police and cover-ups, Nathi Mthethwa, wants to make photographs of President Jacob Zuma’s Nkandla compound illegal.

In Zuma’s world, you can let your friends land at a national key point, but you can’t take a photo of them doing it.

I respect that our president is a democratically elected leader, but still, R8.8?million on lawyers’ fees in four years?...?really? That’s a lot of money for a guy who insists he’s innocent.

There is no way to make picking a fight with the Public Protector look good. The R1.1?million-car-driving SA Communist Party head honcho, Blade Nzimande, told Thuli Madonsela she’s “inconsistent”. Sort of like in the same way that he’s a communist?

One of the reasons they say Zuma needs such hi-tech security at Nkandla is because rape is rife in the area. Nkandla is actually a monument to irony.

Mthethwa also tried to compare Nkandla to the White House. Fair enough, but does this mean that when Comrade Cyril Ramaphosa takes over, he’ll get the tuck shop?

Don’t get me wrong. I know the media would like nothing more than to smear Zuma over Nkandla. In fact, Madonsela’s Nkandla report is getting so much hype, Agang?SA should hide its election promises in it so we’d actually read them.

The common senselessness is not party specific. Look at the DA’s so-called black caucus. When your party is so white that black members have a caucus, you may have a race problem.

Helen Zille is for employment equity, as long as we don’t set any targets: let’s create change, if you feel like it?...?maybe, perhaps.

The DA wants broad-based black economic empowerment (BBBEE), then they don’t, then they do, then they don’t: BBBEE bulimia.

Politicians aren’t alone in this. Take how people went nuts over Melissa Bachman’s picture of a dead lion. Liberalism is where a picture of yet another American who likes killing stuff gets more reaction from liberals than all the street kids in Cape Town.

Or, like how British comedian Russell Brand acted like it was our government’s fault that SAA wouldn’t let him on a plane. Next he’ll be telling us it’s because when they saw his silky locks they decided he was Jan van Riebeeck making a comeback.

Common sense asks how an organisation can spend 100 years fighting for freedom and then charge people money to drive on roads? E-tolling is like revolutionary schizophrenia.

Common sense also asks how government can blow R30?billion in one year by mistake. It’s like the state is dating Khanyi Mbau.

Common sense is where you show us the spy tapes, admit your degree of involvement in the Gupta landing, justify Nkandla and then we start talking about those e-tolls.

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@chestermissing is a puppet political analyst on eNCA’s LNN with Loyiso Gola

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