Category: Blogging

Used to be, not so long ago, that if John Hoge posted something on the Internet, you could count on a DUMBFUCK to stick that post into Google and call John a plagiarist for repeating a joke.

(Remind me to tell you the one about the lardass cripple who hired a flatbed truck and a forklift to haul him to court – it’s a really good one!)

Recently though, DUMBFUCK seems to have lost the knack for searching the Internet for thing other people have said.

Over at Cabin Boy Unread (no), a commenter named “Bob” took issue with the whinging that DUMBFUCK was aiming at Jason Chaffetz over his assertion that it might come down to a choice between paying a premium for the insurance or picking up that sweet iPhone.

Bob pointed out that long before Rep. Chaffetz spoke out on Sunday, President Lightbringer was saying essentially the same thing:

As you can see, DUMBFUCK’S response was as filled with grace and charm as anything else he’s ever written. ALWAYS WITH THE BUTT STUFF…and especially so when the commenter in question shares a name with his monoplacental twin! I wonder if there’s some deeper meaning there…

But it seems…what’s the word?…QUEER! that a DUMBFUCK so skilled at finding quotes on the Internet would go begging for help in this instance, when it’s right out in front of God and EVERYBODY to find.

Copy. Paste. Search. Result.

5 seconds, tops.

Whoo! Somebody get me a cold drink, I am exhausted.

UPDATE: After deleting a comment wherein “Bob” provided the linkage DUMBFUCK requested, “Bob” reposted the video. Sadly the archive does not retain the image, but I feel confident it is the same video posted above.

So now we have a record when DUMBFUCK deletes this comment too, during work hours at KMCN-FM.

I was just about to publish a post about a remarkably stupid person whom I shall not identify. But I’ll bet you could guess who it is even if you graduated at the bottom of your high school class and joined the Navy to avoid getting a real job and living with Mom and Dad.

While proofing the post, I asked myself, “What am I trying to do here? What’s the pointage?” As always, the answer is “Laughery and mockification!”

Sometimes an incredibly stupid person, prone to filing incredibly stupid lawsuits, crosses your path and does things that make a zombie just shake his head and laugh and laugh and laugh. And while the laughing continues, you have to point, so your friends can see and enjoy the spectacle. And then the mockery – because what else can you do but mock someone who files six lawsuits that can’t survive motions to dismiss, and then tries to solve that problem by begging for a lawyer like a lying candy-ass weasel.

I mean, it’s just…FUN.

AND ALL I HAVE IS FUN.

I thought about reminding people what a liar this DUMBFUCK is. But that’s like saying the sky is wet or that water is blue.

Wait, what?

I had written about what a hypocrite this fool is, about how complains sooooo bitterly about his family being off limits while he stalks people’s children and grandchildren. But everyone is already aware of that particular aspect of this dingbat’s sparkling personality, so there’s no point in saying that.

And then I actually wrote a nice passage about how this guy flips back and forth from being hale and strong and ready for a fight, to being unable to put his own socks on or slather his own foot longs with mayonnaise. How he has publicly said, in more than one forum, that he suffers from dementia, but that doesn’t make him, you know, demented or anything!

But I thought, that’s common knowledge…why bother?

In the end, that post just didn’t have any real zing to it.

So I guess I’ll just be super meta and post a post about a post I decided not to post.

Share this:

Apparently someone has figured out how to keep everyone from reading his blog.

Now only Mark in MD can read him.

Maybe Bunny Boy. Wee Willie the Mook.

If they accepted his invitation. A dubious proposition at best.

But don’t worry. The brief joy of hiding under the porch from everyone whose sites he visits stalks looking for butthurt (even though he has to work around a one-user ban in some cases) will soon wear off…

And he’ll get bored…

And lonely…

Because he has no friends…

And no one wants anything to do with him except the voices in the clouds…

And when he can no longer bear the isolation, he’ll be back!

Because he always comes back. He has nothing else. His butthurt is everything to him.

So…I think he’ll pop back out about this time tomorrow.

Until then, just enjoy the temporary black hole in the universe of web stupidity.

Since the inception of this site, our goal has been both clear and simple. We mock and deride one particular DUMBFUCK without mercy or relief. Our hope had been clearly expressed – we sought to drive this particular cum-dripping asshole from the web. We made the terms clear. All the walking penis with the dead whore in an urn needed to do to make us stop was to do for itself what it so fervently wished for us to do. Leaving it alone was the easiest get in the world.

But we now know that this will never happen. We are not equal to our goal. In this task, we have come up short.

Like dozens of DUMBFUCK blogs, like hundreds of DUMBFUCK Twitter handles, like a thousand DUMBFUCK internet radio stations, like a LIFETIME of Schmalfeldtian DUMBFUCKERY, we have ACCOMPLISHED…nothing.

Unless we count…

Exposing the moral and ethical failings of a trailer dwelling douchebag;

Exposing the truth of the “sterling reputation” of an adjudicated deranged cyberstalker and harasser;

Chronicling the legal acumen and epic…what else could we call them but “run away victories” in every civil or criminal case this Dreadful Pro Se has ever initiated;

Bringing to the world the knowledge that there exists a beast among us of such lack of self-control and self realization;

Sharing with the Internet the over sharing of an over sharing over sharer, including, but not limited to the fact that this animal takes photographs and video of its own feces and posts it on the Internet, with detailed narratives of how it enjoys picking the product out of the toilet, rolling it into balls and sniffing it for pleasure;

The Stolen Valor that it has still not requested a clarifying DD214 to refute because HE CAN’T;

Determining that this same mutant may have some sort of personal limit, in that we have not yet encountered photographs or video of its oral interactions with the stuff, nor published written descriptions of the taste. But just because we have not found it, does not mean it’s not out there waiting to be found…

And of course, thousands upon thousands of hours of LULZ!

Despite all of this, however, it has become clear that DUMBFUCK will never cease his abusive, stalking harassment until he is somehow physically restricted from interacting with technology.

We do not possess the faculty on this site to make that happen.

Therefore we have decided that a change in focus is necessary.

We will no longer use our talents of parody, satire, mockery, pointage and laughery as tools to persuade DUMBFUCK to leave the Internet in peace. From now on, we will employ these tools for nothing but personal satisfaction and entertainment. If we think it’s funny, it gets published. It does not matter what anyone else thinks…most of all, DUMBFUCK.

We will no longer leave the Internet when DUMBFUCK does. We will mock and abuse him for LULZ and LULZ alone. Whether he stays online or not, we will mock and abuse him and his family.

We will not stop. Ever.

Not for $2000.

Not even for $10,000.

We call his late wife a whore because she no longer cares and can do nothing about it. We have such plans for when the same fate as befalls all men catches up with a DUMBFUCK.

As we all know, Paul Krendler is tending to his injured child and concentrating on his family at the moment. He handed me, Zombie Morgana, the metaphorical reins to give you all the occasional update as well as an open thread for topics of interest. I had hoped to be making the occasional guest post over here, but not under these circumstances. I am your humble Blog Mistress over at Billy Sez and hope that you will peruse the content there at your leisure and to your own amusement.

So here we are, a fresh and unspoiled thread for you Zombie Horde members. Enjoy!

I have contracted with a Nigerian Prince to provide personal contact data from all my readers for an unspecified purpose. Sorry, but the money was just too good, and we zombies are well-known for not having the most rigid of moral codes. Tell yourself you couldn’t possibly have seen this coming if it helps.

Anyway, by clicking on this post, I have collected all of your WordPress information into the form below for collation and re-sending to the aforementioned royal figurehead. If you do not wish to participate, you can select the Opt Out button in the form below and hit Submit.