5.24.2006

Happiness:

Yesterday, JB commented on Bri's blog that "all of us are always blah, all the live long day." If that statement is true for most people, I feel more depressed than ever. Maybe it's just because I've spent most of my life coping with clinical depression but I've always assumed (or maybe hoped) that most people are happy. Not all of the time, of course. I know that many people have many "blah" days, but I assumed that was not a constant or typical state. Now, though, I'm wondering if blah is the normal state and it's foolish to hope for more. So, people, are most of you happy, depressed or blah?

15 comments:

I think there's a HUGE difference between "blah" and depression. "Blah" is an expression of everyday dissapointments and sadness, but it's not crippling and can easily be reversed by small, little moments of joy.

Or, "blah" means your functioning normally, as a human with a range of emotions, and depression is an illness that makes one non-functional...

So, Bill, if someone is blah every day, day after day, doesn't that eventually equal depression? Enough time of being blah and disatisfied makes me seriously wish for a quick and sudden death, although it is somewhat different from my suicidally depressed periods. I just think that no one should have babies and give them futures full of despair, but maybe that's just me and my clinical depression that makes me such easy prey.

No, because a blah is the "I can't believe I have to go to this boring job" feeling as you get ready, but then when you leave the house, you see a pug in a stupid sweater and it makes you laugh. And, later, at lunch, they have fresh squeezed lemonade and it's soooo delicious, tart and sweet, that even though going back to the boring job sucks donkey balls, it's okay, because the day's almost over, and 24 is on tonight, and it's always a good night when 24 is on.

I definitely see the difference between the 'blah' that still has moments of happiness and the blah that's more like depression. The second type is what I consider the "typical" kind of blah because it's the kind of blah I get. It's not a suicidal depression so it doesn't count as depression for me. But it doesn't get many moments of happiness (only when I see the dogs). But I still feel like the blah that you describe is still a very sad state if that's a frequent state.

Yes. Of course. But the trick is to understand that the moments of happiness are real and far more important. Because they are a loved one's smile over something shared and stupid. They are the etheral smell of lemon zest. They are the things that really matter.

I think Bill has a thing with lemons. If he is ever blah, immediately send him a case full of lemons, and he may just perk up.Wow, I never imagined that my comment would be the subject of a Coveting post. daaaaaaaamn. Better watch what I write from now on, what with big brother watching and all.I hope you know that I was not watering down depression status to blahness status. I was responding to Briar saying, "What the hell is wrong with me that I can't just feel relieved like a normal person," in reference to not having PCOS. It is more the infertility thing that I was relating to. If you want a baby, everything is sorta blah when you don't have one, even if your diagnosis is better than you thought it would be. You're right, it's still sad that blah may be the default feeling that most people carry around with them each day. That's where you just have to hope that the lemonade and lemon zest of which Bill speaks is enough to bring real moments of happiness and then hope that you can convince yourself that those moments of happiness are just as significant and wonderful as the big happy things like your wedding day or getting a new puppy. Or visiting good friends on a Saturday and feeling happy as you walk home because they are such good company, and you know you have good friends to call on when you need it. That changes things from blah to yeah!

About Me

I'm a magazine editor by day, small-business owner, husband and parent of a teenager and baby by night (well, all the time, but you know how the saying goes...). In between all that I am trying to fit in more time for things I want to do and to lose the 15 or so pounds I gained since the baby was in utero. It seems like there's never time for everything.