An Open Letter To Bud Selig

spill the bottle

The Milwaukee Brewers moved from the American League to the National League, benefitting greatly off the field despite being lousy as ever on it. How did the Brew-crew benefit? They got to play against their rival Chicago Cubs quite often in the National League, and thus reaped greater ticket sales. Why don't you do the same and move the Toronto Blue Jays to the National League? Then perhaps the Montreal Expos' attendance would rise, don't you think? So why don't you "suggest" that? Oh, I forgot, neither team is in Wisconsin. You have suggested that the Minnesota Twins should be one of two teams to be contracted even though on the field, they make your Brewers look like bridesmaids. After all, if the Twins die, more fans in the region will flock to Brewers games.

Moreover, by forking over hundreds of millions to Minnesota Twins owner Carl Pohlad for his "pain and suffering," you are allowing the rich to get richer at the expense of the fans and the community as a whole. Is it not true that if Pohlad is forced to sell, he will make less than what he would by accepting contraction? The Twins are playing admirably and you want to subject their fans to attending Brewers games? How much beer we talkin' about Bud? There ain't enough in America to take me out to your ballgame.

And I am not alone. The fans will never forgive you for "handing off" your beloved Brewers to your daughter so that you can run MLB. The fans will never forgive you for cooking MLB's numbers in front of other politicians and maintaining that you had to "contract" two teams because they could not survive and would hurt the sanctity of baseball.

the fans are number one

Even if those two teams were to fold, their failure is a sign of your shortcomings. After all, baseball has never contracted in its history, but it has had numerous work stoppages, canceling the World Series altogether in 1994 (for the first time since 1904 mind you). These work stoppages and the cancellation of the World Series are examples of failures, and as head of the league, a testament of your inaptitude Sir.

You are incapable and unwilling to efficiently run a league that has benefitted from tremendous fan loyalty throughout most of its history and favorable (and unheard of) anti-trust legislation. Your cooking of the books will make Enron blush with envy, while your monopolistic tendencies will make Microsoft blush with jealousy. Your utter disregard and disrespect for the fans makes Albert Belle look like Mother Teresa.

When the Players Association won a collusion case (there are two more "C" words Bud) against the owners, you then felt that expansion was the way to go. Fitting, since the expansion fees could subsidize the payment to the Players Association.

strike, strike!

The fans will also never forgive you for the 232-day strike in 1994-95 that wiped out a World Series, at a time when the average attendance was 31,612 per game. Even in "poor" Montreal, the hapless Expos were atop the entire MLB standings with a 74-40 record — ahead of the ever-powerful Yankees over in the American League — maintaining the 11th slot out of 14 in attendance with 1,276,250. Today, both the Twins and Expos are playing better than your beloved Brewers. No matter when you read this, that statement will ring true, just as much as no matter when you read this, your record will be a failure.

On August 12th, 1994, the players struck. Ah yes, the players. God bless their jerseys , if only I knew which jersey they were wearing. But instead of negotiating with them, you decided to cancel the World Series. You had no right. You had a mandate, duty and responsibility to negotiate with them for the fans, the advertisers and the communities. But the downside to negotiating did not justify the upside of having a World Series; after all, your Brewers were putrid, as they are now.

One category the Brewers are not putrid in is their income statement: the Brewers did indeed make a profit of $16 million last year. Not bad, "Wendy." But a closer look at the Brewers' balance sheet would show that they got rid of their top salaried player, Jeromy Burnitz, at $7.16 million. Furthermore, the Brewers enjoyed a $1.7 million windfall from revenue share. Indeed not bad at all. Too bad attendance at Miller Park is down over 8,500 people per game. I wonder if you or Wendy care.

The more things change, the more they remain the same. The specter of a work stoppage is as real today as it was in 1994. Will you lock them out? Probably not, even you know that would be stupid. Will they strike? Probably not, players know where public perception ranks you, exactly where the Brewers are — at the bottom of the pile.

You have raped America's pastime, the Fat Lady has sung. It's time to throw in the towel and let someone else run Major League Baseball.

I suggest you take a page out of the WWE's Vince McMahon's book and get in the ring: if you want to keep your job, you must face off against Minnesota Governor Jesse "The Body" Ventura (who already made a laughing stock of you due to your ridiculous claims of financial losses before politicians). If you win, you stay in charge. If you lose, then "Yerrrrrrr Out!"

Yours, Mark Simmons

Question: Bud Selig is member of the board for which famous pro sports team?

Answer: Bud Selig spreads his vision as a board member of the Green Bay Packers (he is also a board member of University of Wisconsin Medical School).