June 14, 2012

Button with a hole!!!!

I don't mean to be mean or impolite towards anyone. This is just out of frustration for my helplessness.
Today is one of those days. You know, when you think your day is going to be another perfect summer day and it turns out to be crappy. I have this argument with my *bitter half right before stepping out of the door. As miffed as I could be, I bang the door at my back with a thud.

The nature of my current job is such that I have to train the employees of a client, on how to use a particular tool. Each person’s level of knowledge is different in its usage. Today is the turn of a lady, of whom I have been given many warnings and precautions. Not that she is a devil or monster. She’s a nice lady. I was supposed to meet at her 8.30. I told you, it’s a crappy day. In the train, I was eating this bland double fiber English muffin which was all the more insipid. I could not take more than a couple of bites and it goes back into the bag. (That’s what I thought I did). When I get back to work, I realized I need to rant for the next two hours. Where’s my breakfast gone? Gone with the light rail to the downtown..:(

So, I go and grab a quick French toast. I don’t know why they name it French toast? That was the worst I ate on this coast. Do I need rhyming in this hurry? Then, rush to our lady. She might be upset for my delay. Gave her some stolid explanation. Now starts our session.

She tests an application where customers go online and order personalized license plates for their vehicles. Out of anxiety, I blurted: “So, how much does it cost to get a customized license plate?” That’s it! She explained it to me for 45 mins. Yes, 45 mins. Our session went on like that and trust me if I say, a single word did not enter my head. I don’t know if I was to train her or learn from her.

Not sure how many of you read “Who moved my Cheese?”. If you read and remember the character Hem, that is what she is. I totally understand that she belongs to the old school and respect that. But OMG! I am out of words to describe her cubicle or her work nature. I managed to click a picture of her cube at the end of the day, for you guys.

A forest of trees chopped to decorate a cubicle.
I wanted to take pictures from all angles, but if I get caught, hmm..then I'll be blogging full time. so, adjust with this one for now.

One of the excerpts from our session is like this. She could not pick up the word radio button. She asks me, “Why can’t they just call it a button with the hole?” Hmm..what do I say?

I gave her two warnings that I need to go to the rest room. As the conversation was never breaking, I had to literally run. I had a feeling if my bladder is going to blast.

Finally, I mustered all my courage and senses to speak in a polite way: "I know you have lot of work to do, So, I think I will let you go. We can catch up next week". It doesn't sound as if I am trying to free myself; rather looks like I am trying to free her from me. She says: "Oh! next week. No, I am too busy". I say: "That's fine. Take your time. Please check your calendar and let the manager know your schedule. And she will inform me". It seems she is available in July. May the lord save my soul. Amen!!!Well, I learned some diplomacy after marrying my *butter half .Hmm. what to do? One needs to be diplomatic at times, you know.
Had we started on the next task, I bet there wouldn't be anything left in my body or brains. Freed like a bird in a cage, I rushed to my seat announcing, I need to go home right now and have two Margaritas!!!Whatever..All the while, she was explaining things to me, my mind was just noting down points to write for my blog tonight :(. And unfortunately, I was busted and don't remember a thing.
To sum up, I just recollected another excerpt at work about one of my students (they all are going to retire in less than 3-5 yrs). Long before this one-on-one training sessions started, all the employees were given a formal training by the client. The instructor was showing them how to use the tool and was giving a demo on a flight reservation application. Guess what the student says: "Well, I don't book flights. I renew licenses online".

* words copied from here.Okay guys, I need to hit the bed now. Tomorrow, I got to train a lady who is retiring next month. Pray for me plssss.

Hmm... that cubicle needs a hole somewhere and so does its occupant! I work in a boiling cauldron myself -Treasury & Funds hub of a Bank- and I also have my share of holes in the buttons! All I can say is to modify Coleridge a bit: Suspend your faculties of impatience! (The original quote says Suspend your faculties of disbelief and I guess you need a bit of that too!) And hey, your writing is addictive! :-D

Samajh mien nahi aaya ki aapne taareef kiya, yaa daant diya...:) whatever it is..am happy to hear from you. And it's not one cubicle, there are many jungles of paper like that in the state govt offices. Thank you for the lovely comment. I am blushing here..:p btw, my mama is now transferred to the Treasure & funds hub too...:)

God, I'll pray for you. Seriously for 45 mins. I mean that must be a torture. And that click, she needs some help in organising stuff. BTW, toast and coast was a perfect rhyme. I should ask you for help while writing poems. :)