Woof. Now THAT's a toughie. Really though, there's no better way to capture the Boss's essence than by seeing him live, so I'd say either Live 1975-85 or a classic late '70s bootleg like Winterland or Passaic.

If pressed for a studio album... my favorite is Born To Run, but if I were just starting someone on a diet of Bruce juice I'd probably start them with The River. It's a wonderful bridge between the bandana-brandishing 80s star most folks know him as and the blue collar badass from the 70s that comes out during shows(then and now :) ).

Not enough upvotes. Seriously. Everyone's mind is going straight to sex before they realize a) how much tail rock stars pull and b) that even besides success with women, they still have the greatest job in the world.

Zombie Jesus (a fake movie trailer a few friends and I made for a class project around, appropriately enough, Eastertime). It was bad enough having to shoot your loved ones, and now you have to shoot your Lord and Savior? Oh, wait, no, the bullets don't do anything to JESUS. He died for your sins, now you're gonna die for his appetite.

Morrissey always kills it with witty lyrics- The Smiths or solo career. Noel Gallagher called him "the most literate man ever to write music". It can be pretty subtle, tounge-in-cheek and dark in humor but that's just Moz for ya. "So I broke into the palace/ with a sponge and a rusty spanner/ She said, 'I know you, and you cannot sing'/ I said, 'That's nothing, you should hear me play piano"...."Each household appliance is like a new science in my town"..."I want to live and I want to love/ I want to catch something that I might be ashamed of"...."And now I know how Joan of Arc felt/ as the flames rose to her Roman nose and her Walkman started to melt" and so on

Rosie is such a big, fun, silly, great story. Half that man's discography is great story songs. "Highway Patrolman" was actually made into a movie by Sean Penn (called "The Indian Runner" I believe), "Bobby Jean" is a great story about losing a close childhood friend, "Racing In The Street" is beautiful, "Lost In The Flood" is Bruce's own personal "Desolation Row", "Johnny 99", "The River", "Independence Day", I could keep going. The best musical storyteller there is, bar none. Springsteen rules.