Operation Coitus

19. November 2007

In spite of afternoon talk shows about penis-length and celebrities not wearing any panties: The
sexual needs of handicapped people are still a taboo issue in the 21st
century. Whoever cannot live a "normal" sexuality finds offers meaning to help
- purely physical or beyond.

Sex is for sale – that is nothing new. At Pascha 's in Cologne/Germany, one of the largest relevant establishments, handicapped people do not get a discount but still special treatment and attention. "We have elevators for wheelchair drivers and help everybody coming to us", informs Armin Lobscheid, the operator of the place, during his meeting with DocCheck Newsletter. Once upstairs, the customers are not taken by their hand like a little child, but can move freely on the floors and negotiate with the girls. "I don't believe that there is such a service anywhere else" says Lobscheid.

If the customer is handicapped, it's less frantic

The girls take a little more time when they are with a handicapped customer but otherwise there is no difference. "The customers are mainly wheelchair drivers, but we also have some mentally handicapped customers coming to us", explains Lobscheid. Lobscheid can only estimate, how many handicapped customers are coming to the Pascha, about 50 to 100 regular ones, and many more that just come by occasionally. The offer is very popular in the Cologne area: "Our handicapped are always very satisfied." Lothar Sandfort in Trebel, Lower Saxonia, offers sex for sale with prostitutes for handicapped people. If you visit the website Sexualbegleitung.org , you will find contact addresses of prostitutes just like anywhere else in the internet. But nonetheless everything is different here compared to the Pascha. Sandfort explains his intentions: "It is not just about a quick satisfaction. We want to help handicapped people to increase their attractiveness". "Just like anyone else, handicapped people want to be interesting for other people or their life partner – also, but not only sexually."

Sexual escorting as life aid

Off this realization Sandfort, himself physically handicapped, fathered the Institut zur Selbst-Bestimmung Behinderter (ISBB, institute for self-determination of handicapped people) 15 years ago during the emancipation movement. The offer: Sexual escorting for physically and mentally handicapped people. The actors: Prostitutes especially trained on the job during a six weeks workshop. "We do have girls publishing their contact data in the internet you can contact directly. But this is not the core of our business. Usually the handicapped attends at least one weekend-workshop here in our guesthouse before any contact to the sexual escorts", as Sandfort explains to the DocCheck Newsletter. There are several versions of those ISBB workshops, for example one for people with cognitive limitations, another one for the physically handicapped and so-called Tantra-days addressing both, handicapped and not handicapped people. On Youtube.com you can take a look at the course of such a workshop. "During the workshops and later during the sexual escort, absolute honesty is essential", says Sandfort. That applies for the handicapped as well as for the prostitutes who are not supposed to play an act and have to communicate openly if there is something disturbing them. To make this work, supervisions are held on a regular basis in a semi-annual rhythm. "We don't sell illusions but a learning process", emphasizes Sandfort. This learning process can be continued with the individual escort after the workshop. Alongside the obligation to be honest, the prices differ from regular prostitution. 100 Euro is a fixed price per hour – whether the service is caressing, a blow-job or sex.

Sex is a topic in online-communities as well

If you don not want to go all the way but would prefer to exchange information about the topic first, you might feel more comfortable in online-communities for handicapped people. There are several internet meeting points, for example Startrampe.net especially for paraplegic which will celebrate its 10th birthday in another year and a half. Sexuality is quite naturally a topic on those forums. The ideal would be a lively exchange between handicapped and not handicapped people. But that is difficult. Almost all operators of forums wish that a lot more not handicapped people would participate – a classic problem of self-help. And sometimes people come that are not wanted. Online-peepers specialized in handicapped are rather rare, but they are out there. If they can be identified they usually are kicked out of the forum right away, but sometimes it takes a while until somebody smells the rat.