and I've been browsing around this site, it's so wonderful to find a group of people who understand what it's like living with allergies. I've had hayfever for most of my life, but my son, who is now 14 months old is ana. allergic to milk, eggs, wheat and I also suspect sesame seeds. At times I hear other mothers talking and I feel so differentiated from them, they never worry about whats on the table or for lunch or what the kid beside theirs is eating. They can just go to the frozen food isle for a quick meal and not give their decisions a second thought. I'm so very glad to meet you all. Also, this is the first online group I've joined and my first post on any site, so if I mess it up, please accept my apologies in advance, it's not like the site will crash??? (crossing fingers). Cheers.
Bryce's Mom.

Welcome BrycesMomI'm new to online forums, myself. But the support is really wonderful. And amazing information that you would never get from a nutritionist or Doc.

The good news is he will probably outgrow some of these. And just think of how much healthier your family is eating than those of the "frozen food Mom's." Definitely a benefit to all the label-reading!

Welcome. I'm new to all this posting stuff too. I'm getting more comfortable, but don't know if I'll ever get the hang of all the abbreviations.

My son has similar allergies to Bryce. He is allergic to milk, egg, wheat, peanuts, and environmental ones too. It's hard! How long ago did you find out about Bryce's allergies? Ethan is now 3 yrs and we discovered his allergies at about 6 mos. He reacted to my breastmilk. I eliminated everything from my diet and his symptoms cleared. He reacts to contact with dairy products and the last tests showed no allergy to wheat, but he reacted every time I re-introduced it. Pediatrician said to consider wheat still off-limits. Ugh! I have no idea what would happen if he actually ingested milk, eggs or peanuts. I'd rather not find out!

As much as we try to explain our situations, I don't think anyone can fully understand unless they live it - just like lots of other things I guess. But, it does get frustrating and overwhelming. That's why it's great to have places like this. I wish I had done this earlier. I'm considering starting a support group in my area too. We can all be such valuable resources for eachother...silly to go it all alone.

Hi Bryce's Mom and welcome! This is the only chat group I've taken part in as well, and I'm so glad I joined - the support has been tremendous. I feel so much better able to manage my son's allergies. My 4 yr old son is allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, sesame seeds, egg, fish, sunflower seeds, mustard seed, poppy seed, pineapple, green peas, dogs and horses. He was diagnosed with food allergies at 12 months of age, after we had already experienced a trip to the ER at 9 months of age. I felt so alone and at a loss as to how to safely live our lives. With the advice received from our son's allergist (Dr. Susan Waserman) & this chat group, we now make wise choices and still live a full life. We've reached the acceptance stage, but I do have the odd momentary bout of feeling upset that we have to live our lives this way - it is really hard sometimes. In today's society, we feel surrounded by people that can eat anything without a second thought - they can eat in restaurants and pick up food, and it's so EASY. We must prepare all our foods - even bread. But, honestly, I think we are healthier, and we certainly don't burden our children with any complaints about the way we must live our lives. We just make it a normal part of their lives, and we are teaching them the joys of cooking and eating healthy. We have a 7 yr old daughter without food allergies, so most of her childhood memories are of eating the way we do now. Most of the time, we accept it and we have amazing support from our family & friends. Our needs are supported at the many social gatherings we attend. They avoid serving foods with our son's allergens, but we ALWAYS bring our son's foods with us anyway. But at least we can be comforted by the fact that there will be no peanuts, or sesame, or shellfish, etc. at these gatherings.

Anyway, Bryce's Mom, I'm sure you'll find this chat group to be amazing, and supportive. Welcome!

Hi Ann & Julie, Thanks for your kind words of support. I really appreciate hearing that there are others in the same situation. Bryce started to colic when he was about a month old - I was breatfeeding. My sister in law is a mother of 4 and a naturopath, she suggested I take dairy out of my diet, I did and his colic cleared up. He also had this yucky yellow crusty ooze on his face that just didn't clear up no matter what we did. I saw another naturopath who took one look at Bryce and put my on an allergy reducing diet and the yellow yuk cleared up in 3 days. He also had head to toe eczema and no matter what we did, his skin just didn't get any better. His dermatologist just kept prescribing stronger and stronger quartisones then finally out of complete and total desperation (Bryce's skin was inflamed and raw and he couldnt' sleep) I went to an energy therapist. I just had to try anything that held out any kind of promise. After 3 treatments the inflamation was gone and I haven't needed cortizone in almost 6 months. Will the therapist be able to cure his allergies, I don't know, but he's keeping Bryce's skin clear and thats really all I care about. I was already pretty good about cooking, a few years ago my husband and I decided to remove as many chemicals and preservatives from out diet as we could, but we didn't practice an allergy conscience diet. Since I've been on the no dairy, wheat, eggs or peanuts, I'm feeling better than I have - ever. So I must have intolerances I was unaware of. I'm working on accepting that this is our life and trying to find inventive ways to embrace it and make it as normal as possible. I also don't ever want Bryce to feel different or deprived so I am looking for ways to adapt my fav's - like ice cream - into something we can all enjoy together. I found a website called Vitalita.com and they have amazing gluten free vegan recipes for baked goods and iced treats. Have any of your kids ever had ana. reactions? How did you find out that they had allergies? Have you found any docs who really understand what this is all about? What coping strategies have you found works? Pleased to meet you. BrycesMom

Hi! It is comforting to meet others who have allergies, or who have children with allergies. I'm allergic to most everything. My son has shown allergies to milk, soy, and corn. We have him eating wheat now, but no other major allergens.
I know how you feel about seeing others feeding their kids just about anything, and you have to be ultra careful about what you feed him. My son also has reflux, so that makes it even harder. He can't eat anything with too much fat or grease or he suffers heatburn.
One thing I hate is when I am feeding him vegetables and rice milk for lunch and someone will say, "Why don't you give him something good?!?" or they will ask him, "You want to go to McDonalds, don't you? Say "Milkshake"....People are very ill-informed about food allergies, and donot realize (I think) how deadly they can be. I hate it when people treat me like it is all in my head, or that I am just being overly cautious. But I would rather seem like an **** retentive freak of a mom then have to deal with the consequences of a life threatening reaction.

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

Hi, I'm relatively new here too - I sympathize with what you younger moms are going through - been there, done that. I have four teenage/young adult asthmatic kids, three of whom are also nut allergic. I've been where some of you are now so reading your messages brought me back many years. As your kids grow, it doesn't get any easier for them or you so its worth it to accept it as a way of life. It's actually easier when they are young as you can control what and where they eat. As they grow older, it becomes a matter of teaching them to be responsible for their own care and not just believeing that it will never happen. Sometimes they are willing, sometimes they ignore. Sometimes they carry their meds, sometimes they refuse! But sometimes situations crop up that give you an opportunity to help them be responsible. My 14 yr old daughter lost out on an impropmtu opportunity to go with friends because she didn't bring her pouch with her meds and I refused to lend her mine for the evening. I was in her bad books for a day or so but now I think she'll check for her pouch before she goes out! Any other moms of teens/young adults out there who have suggestions about how to help non-compliant teens see the light?

Hi Shai, I know exactly what you mean. I so often feel like I'm being an over anxious control freak about Bryce's food, but there's no other choice. I want to do whatever I can to avoid a trip to emerg. Stay strong, and don't pay any attention to the people who don't know any better. I suppose what would be hard would be trying to explain to your son that even though people tell him that he wants a milkshake and they make it sound like such a good thing, the temptation for him would really be difficult to resist. Is your son old enough to understand that not everything that looks good, is? BrycesMom

Pepper, How to get non-compliant teens to be compliant? I remember being that age, and I was stubborn to boot. However, I never had anything I had to comply with that would save me from a life threatening event. At that age, you feel invinciable and I'm sure your teens don't really believe it will happen to them. It also isn't something that you can just say, let them learn, like getting a detention for not doing their homework - if they even still do that now. They have to carry that epi pen with them. With allergies being as common as they are now, I'm wondering if epi pens won't soon become an accessory just like an iPod. If I think of anything, I'll email you back. BrycesMom

BrycesMom, My son is only 22 months old, so he's still a little young to understand these things. I just wish other people would not push the whole food thing. Why do people obsess about food with babys? And they want to spoil them with cookies and stuff, then treat me like I am mean why I say he can't eat it because it contains milk, eggs, nuts, etc. Sorry for the complaints. Hope everything is going well with your little one.

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

Thanks, BrycesMom - yah, you can't just let reality be the teacher here in the case of teens not carrying their meds - as you say, it can be a life - no-life choice so its not really an option to let them fail at it - has to be another way to get them to see the necessity for it. However, two of my allergic over-18ers are getting better at this now that they have been to College for a year but I know there are times they won't carry their meds - that's out of my control once they are out of sight! However, the 14yr old still can have consequences placed on her if there's no compliance - just have to be careful that it doesn't become a power struggle 'cause then you've lost the battle.

Hi Shai, I remember going through that also with my kids - and I have three out of four of them who are nut allergic! Most people understood - but the hardest - the inlaws and close relatives! Of course, since I too am allergic/asthmatic I usually heard "well, they sure don't get it from our side"....thanks, the guilt trip was really helpful! There are allergy buttons that you can get for young kids - I think they say something like "Don't feed me - I'm allergic" -helps people to remember to check with Mom or Dad. I also had to brainwash my kids from a very young age that they don't take anything from anyone unless Mom says its okay. Your guy is a little young for that but you could also make up some sort of T-Shirt that says in big letters - "Don't feed me I'm allergic" and wear it during those situations where you find people aren't listening to you. Its frustrating, I know - you try your best to keep offending foods away from your child only to have someone who isn't even a stranger, feed him the very thing that will hurt him and then look at you as if you have two heads when you tell them for the millionth time that he can't eat it - and yet they still don't get it!! Hang in there! He will grow and start to voice it himself if you teach him to.

Thanks Pepper. I just want people to understand that I'm not being mean by not letting grandpa give him a cookie from the bakery, or by not letting him eat fast food...I'm just trying to keep him safe and healthy. I just hate being the party pooper by saying no all the time to everyone who wants to stuff him full of goodies.

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

Shai, You won't be able to escape the "bad guy" label until your little one is able to speak for himself. Its kinda like a designated driver - moms are unfortunately often the designated "bad guy" when it comes to the health of their kids but perhaps you can enlist your husband's help or perhaps even convince even one relative how serious this is - liken it to giving a child sugar if they are diabetic - most people understand that - or letting a child drink cleaning fluid from a pop bottle - just because its in the "safe" looking pop bottle doesn't mean its safe - we've all heard horror stories like that. I've learned that people just don't think food can be dangerous until they see it in a different light (such as a diabetic's caution about sugar intake). Unfortunately for some, it takes seeing the child suffering through an acute asthma attack or worse, an anaphalactic episode - and no one wants to have that happen.

I like the title - "designated 'bad guy'" - I feel like making myself a little DBG button to wear.

This week I had to remind my 7-year-old's teacher to please not give him candy, even if it's "just made out of maple syrup" - it gives him mixed messages - they've been told that he is to get NOTHING without us checking it first, and who knows if there wasn't traces of something in it? She got very defensive and I really felt like the DBG at that point.

Maybe someone will come out with a line of t-shirts for FA parents with "DBG" on them. The kids get the cute pastel "I'm allergic" t-shirts and the parents get black ones with red letters on it. (and sigh)

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