Local Wives Staying Clear Of Husbands Who Are Bitter About Missing Sturgis Rally

The Sturgis Motorcycle Rally has officially kicked off, and local Sioux Falls wives have begun staying clear of their husbands who forgot about it until now.

“Hell yeah, I’m bitter about it! My wife was supposed to remind me about it coming up so I can get the boys together and get on the hogs. What other reason do I have to put the old Harley in the trailer and hit the road? It’s such a fun time out there with all the leather and the booze, so I’m pretty pissed off I forgot about it,” said one husband we spoke with.

Every year many local businesses lose out on work output because bitter husbands daydreaming on the clock.

“We lose about 10 to 20% of work output during the week of the Sturgis Rally because of husbands who forgot about it until it started. It’s a normal occurrence this time of year, so we’re always prepared with more staff on standby. I hear it’s a fun time, but I’m not into the whole having good time because I’m a supervisor and that’s not what we do,” said one supervisor we spoke with.

Sioux Falls businesses usually have a pretty good week with all of the wives staying clear of their house and dropping big dollars on shopping sprees.

“This week is huge for us. We get all the women who want to stay away from their bitter husbands fuming over not being able to go to Sturgis. We get about a 30% boost in sales during this week. Not only is it the wives, but also the tourists coming and going from the rally. It’s really important to us that we capitalize on the bitterness of people,” said one boutique owner we spoke with.