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Game LAGs and FREEZES;on peer to peer network

I have a peer to peer, 2 computer network, crossover cable, no hub. Both on internet via 56K modem, using ICS on Win98SE machine. Other puter is just Win98, "first" edition.

My son plays games on the Win98SE machine, and gets lag not only during online games (UO), but also offline games (Baldur's Gate). He's also getting computer freezes during Baldur's Gate play, and has to reboot. Had to take Everquest back because the patch server kept disconnecting.

I suspect something with my little LAN is causing some of these lags. How can I monitor my network for packet collisions or whatever? Is there free/cheap software for doing this? The netwatcher thing that comes with Windows seemes pretty non-intuitive, can't get it to do anything.