*Update pg. 9 - The other parents are freezing me out

All of the other parents at my 3 year old DD's preschool hate me. They literally refuse to speak to me, and most won't even make eye contact with me. DD is popular with the other kids and DH chats with the other parents all the time, the hostility is only directed at me. It's gone from ignoring me in person to standing in groups whispering and pointing at me. It's truly bizarre. I can't get a playdate there for DD to save my life despite other kids asking their parents if she can play outside of school. I've never said much more than hello, good morning, or how are you. I smile and try to be friendly which is hard because I'm really shy, and I'm being met with serious coldness.

I just wish there was an explanation I was privy to. It's fine if they don't like me, but I would at least like to know why.

Sorry, I just needed to vent and after weeks of racking my brain, DH is tired of talking about it with me.

Comments (107)

Well, I figured out which scool you're talking about. :) Tell the school officials that children can be affected by the bullying that is occurring between parents. Frankly, as a Waldorf school I'm disapointed they wouldn't see this already. Tell them to look into the Social Inclusion Program that was formulated by Kim John Payne. It is being implimented in a growing number of Waldorf schools to combat bullying. It would absolutely apply well in this case.

Just as an fyi, that parental behavior is not general to all Waldorf Schools. There may be other political games, but I've never heard of that one and I have extensive Waldorf school experience. Find the other non-full timers and non-bullies. They tend to be far quieter and cowed, but I promise you're not the only one. Band together.

I'll bring up that program and see what they say. Thanks, tatebk. I'm positive this has everything to do with where I live, and nothing to do with it being a Waldorf school. I will definitely be seeking out the other parents who are treated as outsiders to try and do some community building with them.

All the more reason to stay put! I understand their motivation to a point, but going so far as to make a plan, to target the mother specifically, to act as though you don't exist is so...gross. I hope you are able to crack that ice eventually. Not because they deserve your friendship, but because your daughter doesn't deserve to see her mother being treated poorly by others. My mom was bullied by the "popular moms" at the church I grew up going to and I have not forgotten how much it sucked to see my mom trying for our sake even though they constantly made cutting remarks and hurt her feelings. To this day I wish I could tell those women off!

The next time one of them was rude I'd probably say something like" it looks like you've confused me with someone without a spine, I've dealt with bigger bitches than you, and by the way myself and my child are going nowhere"
Can't believe grown educated adults act like such classless cliquish bitches.
I wish you could say something like "when I was a dancer your husband frequented the club, he really was into one of my coworkers and she took him for a lot of money, but is it true that he has a small dick? I mean with all the grinding they did she felt it plenty of times and she compared it to a tootsie roll"

What a bunch of bitches! You don't want to be friends with them anyways... you're too good for them! I agree, talking to the other part-time parents is a great idea. Let them know what's going on so they don't get run off by the skanks. Good luck!