Thursday, January 11, 2007

Andy Rooney

I HAVE BEEN RELIABLY INFORMED THAT ANDY ROONEY WAS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FOLLOWING MESSAGE.

Andy Rooney ALLEGEDLY said on "60 Minutes" a few weeks back:

I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers.

***I guess that African-Americans weren't ever slaves in the USA? That many Japanese weren't interned in WWII? That blacks weren't allowed in white schools or white restaurants or baseball? That Jews weren't turned down by medical schools? Whatever happened to all the Indians who once lived throughout the U.S.?***

The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the UnitedCaucasianCollege Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens...Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

***Blacks started their own organizations because they couldn't get accepted into white organizations--like the National Association of Realtors or Miss America and golf clubs.***

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

***Yes, you are banned from driving while drunk. And from driving recklessly. And without insurance and without a license. And, believe it or not, more people are killed by guns in this country than by baseball bats. Or by fists. Are you really so stupid--or are you just playing a role, like Borat?***

I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion.

***It is an dangerous, ignorant viewpoint. Some people murder homosexuals because they think homosexuality is "wrong."***

I have the right "NOT" to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.

***What does "not tolerant" mean? Keeping them from getting jobs? Depriving them of their lives?***

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling, it is the Law of Probability.

***What if 20% are black and 70% of all arrests are of black people? What if the great majority of people executed in this country are black? Doesn't that tell you something? You really have something against blacks, don't you?***

I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

***I don't mind buying things from people still learning English. What if a senile old jerk like you went to China--how long would it take you to learn Chinese?***

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.

***You mean only native Americans can criticize our country? Your father and grandfather were really killed in the wars? They died so that immigrants won't have the same basic rights as native-borns? What a silly thing to die for!They must have been as dumb as you.***

I think the police should have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word "freeze" or "stop" in English, see the above lines.

***Especially if they're black, right? And if they don't understand English, the hell with them foreigners, right?***

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

***You seem to have a problem with immigrants and with blacks. How about Jews? Chinese? Gooks in general?***

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document; and open to their interpretations.

***Gee, I thought the Supreme Court interpreted the constitution. Since when have gooks been interpreting it?This is a strange fantasy you have. You need to see a psychiatrist. One who was born in this country aand speaks impeccable English.***

I don't hate the rich I don't pity the poor.

***I envy the rich and pity the poor. Anyone who doesn't pity the poor should burn in hell eternally after death. ***

I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.

***I don't watch them. Maybe you should read more and watch less wrestling on TV.***

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid; and smack their little behinds when necessary, and say "NO!"

***Oh, that's what's wrong with this country? Not poverty, broken homes, people without health insurance, and so forth? All we have to do is spank our kids more?***

I am sick of "Political Correctness." I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa; so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was from Europe. I am proud to be from America and nowhere else

***Don't you think that people should be called what they want to be called? What would you prefer to call black people? No, don't tell me. I can guess.

***And if you don't like my point of view, tough...***

It's tough on ALL of us. Ignorant, prejudiced, despicable morons like you elected Geo W Bush president.