Sunday, October 28, 2012

WILLOW MANOR BALL 2012

The manor is awash with soft candlelight and bundles of deep red peonies. The creaky hardwood floors have been polished to a mellow gloss, just begging for some tangos, twists, and trysts!

We should consider every day lost,

on which we have not danced, at least once.

Friedrich Nietzsche

Please check into the comment section of this post and let us know you've arrived, and who might be accompanying you. If you would like us to visit your blog, to admire your lovely attire, and date, be sure to sign the Mr. Linky widget provided at the end of this post.

Come in and join the festivities, which miraculously will last an entire 24 hours. Remember, everyone who leaves a comment today, will be considered a guest, and eligible for one of two door prizes.

My co-host for the evening, the inimitableR.A.D. (Ronaldo Antonio Dent) Stainforth, is responsible for the wonderful music tonight, as well as persuading the legendary Sir George Solti, to lead the band, as well as serve as master of ceremonies. I asked him to open with my favorite song, All The Things You Are. Speaking of, I'm a tad nervous, since Ronaldo looks incredibly like Marcello Mastroianni. When he arrives, I instructed Stevens (yes, he does look a lot like Anthony Hopkins, who is notably absent tonight) to insert a yellow rose into Mr. Stainforth's lapel, to avoid any embarrassing confusion on my part. After a drink or two, I sometimes err on the side of ditziness.

See what I mean ...

Speaking of, the caterers have stocked the manor bar with crates of vintage champagne, and are prepared to mix up just about any drink you can imagine, including the specialty of the evening, absinthe. Take care ... the lovely potent green goes down so very easily.

Almost nobody dances sober,

unless they happen to be insane.

H.P. Lovecraft

Okay, one of them has arrived. Even without a mask, I'm not sure if he is Stainforth or Mastroianni. No yellow rose, so I am assuming he is Marcello ... oh those intense eyes ... I'm flying, and I haven't even touched the absinthe. Ronaldo is not naturally prone to smile, so I wonder if Stevens forgot the rose?

Ronaldo will be happy to know that both Veronica Lake and Christina Hendricks will be here tonight. Veronica arrived a few minutes ago, accompanied by her good friends, Paulette Goddard and Dorothy Lamour. I'm not quite sure what he sees in her ... she looks a little stunted to me ...

What am I wearing tonight? Tatyana's gorgeous ruby-red satin ball gown, period circa 1836, worn by Liv Tyler in the Martha Fiennes film, Onegin. It fits me beautifully, after it was let out a tad in the bust line. I did the Scarlett O'Hara thing, and tugged it just below my shoulders, for extra ... charm. As always, I like to dance in my creamy Irish knit woolly socks. Perhaps I can coax Mr. Stainforth to remove them for me later ... with his teeth.

Late autumn weather has arrived in Central Ohio. It's cold, dark, and spitting rain. Stevens has stoked the fireplace with logs from the lovely white pine we lost last year. The collection of umbrellas in the entryway is growing. Gene Kelly drove Ronaldo to Ohio in his Withnail Jag, only to have it stall at the end of the drive. He's now in the kitchen, drying his lizard skin shoes in the oven, having a smoke, beautifully contemplating the rain. Gene is still outside, singing, and dancing in it. When will he come inside and twirl me?

Stevens has just informed me that Christina is here, posing outside for the paparazzi. This is my chance to see who shows up first at her side, then I'll slip him the rose. Oh good, she's wearing black ... so hate when my competition shows up in the same color dress. It does look as if she's wearing another one of those garish red wigs. She does the faux extremely well ...

There's also a bit of confusion about the two Judes here this evening ... Law ... and Dippold. This might be rather amusing, since they're both wearing masks, and both the same height and weight. Helen, darling, you might want to double check, before you pull him behind the potted palm.

Please feel free to help yourselves to the fabulous buffet. My excellent Central Ohio caterers suggested American fare this year, so the tables are filled with loads of gourmet hamburgers and fries, and of course bottles and bottles of my favorite ketchup. Don't be shy. Go ahead, glug yourself a lovely puddle of ketchup ... for dipping. Finger licking is okay, too.

Have you seen the guy with the chicken mask? Maybe it's the absinthe speaking, but he seems to keep pinching my bottom. When I turn around, he looks at his gloved hand, and points at it, with the other. Something tells me it's Tom and Dinosaur Hand, or perhaps one of the many ghosts who have gathered here tonight. I do hope he doesn't end up floating down the Scioto again this year ... without a raft.

Truman ... yes ... Capote decided he could survive a few hours in the backwoods of Ohio. The Willow Manor Ball doesn't quite match his infamous Black and White ball, but nearly. He seems quite amazed at the gathering of notables here tonight, and has happily placed himself at the door, to personally thank everyone for coming. His wittiness does, at times, border on the rude. I hope the manor guests think it's cute.

Thank you all so very much for coming. The last song is this lovely piece by Scott Joplin ... puts me in a soft sofa mood. Make sure to pop in Monday around noon-ish EST for some brunch and a rehash of all the fun ball scuttlebutt. The winners of the door prizes will also be announced. Now, if you'll please excuse me, I need some assistance with my woolly socks. Toodles!

Oh, wait. There's still a few straggling guests. Sir Solti, will you play something that will detach Christina from Ronaldo, and send her on her merry way? Perfect.

There's something so -- well -- sexy about a masked ball, isn't there? Tess, you look fantastic. Red is definitely your colour. Truman was the soul of chivalry at the door, by the way. He even kissed my hand. He might have got carried away, but my darling date whisked me off before he had the chance. Anyway, I'm off to sample the champagne.

Good Evening All ....There will be no mistaking which Jude is mine tonight! You see, we are color coordinated. Dear Tess ... you have outdone yourself ~~ the Manor, music, food, drink, YOUR GOWN! Dahling, how perfect ~~ absinthe matches the green tinges adorning my mask! I plan on dancing the entire night with MY Jude ....

Dear Helen, I'm so glad there's no confusion over the Judes. The other one, is very easy to spot...he's marvelously steam punk this evening. You look stunning, I might add. I see it will be difficult to persuade your Jude to leave your side!

Dear local girl Eleanor (of Aquitaine) will be accompanying me tonight. She is very shy, and asks that people are patient with her. She speaks only Old English and Old French, which may make her sound as if she's been at the absinthe. We're looking forward to seeing everyone in a while.

Good God, I had no idea Veronica was that short! Well, maybe the chicken will take a liking to her....speaking of which, I sense a chicken dance later in the evening if he takes too much of the absinthe....but seriously, vintage champagne...that is my next objective for the evening!! And oh how I LOVE peonies...another triumph Madame Tess! Thank you profusely for welcoming us all into your lovely home!

Absolutely...I get rather ditzified with the drinks...and why haven't I been using the "reply" feature? I was so distracted with all the fascinating guests. You do look quite dashing in your pirate attire...

It's so wonderful to be here. Your dress looks fabulous Tess. In fact, everyone looks fabulous - have you seen Helen's dress - a show stopper if ever there was one. Don't tell me Placido has disappeared already? Oh I hear him somewhere out back doing his vocalies! Seems like he's going to serenade the hostess. Off to mingle now and grab (sorry - find) a much needed drink. I see the kegs arrived!

We're having a lovely time, and we hope you enjoy the live video footage we were able to provide over at Junk Thief Central. We know things were a bit tense before the ball with Truman, but we're glad you hopped into his flying red Caddy in Paris to get back to Ohio just in time. Catty or not, he was a great addition to the party. We're so glad PeeWee managed to rescue the Duchess of Alba from the desert and bring her and Yoko Ono and Rip Taylor were truly the power couple of the evening. We promise to post details. tomorrow.

Oh, my. I'm feeling just a little tipsy. Tess, you wouldn't mind, would you, if I were to just lie down for a little while? Perhaps in the library? I saw what looked like a very comfortable sofa in there. Oh, thank you so much. I won't be long, but I really must lie down for a bit.

Hello everyone. I just arrived with elephants in tow. I understand Tess is catching a few winks, so we'll just hit the dance floor and give her our thanks later. What a fabulous spread! Amazing music, and wow what a stellar crowd. Maybe I'll just get one little drink first...;-)

Hmm... Sandra's naked man seems to be out in the garden now--just saw him hiding in the quick-set hedge. However, Stevens assures me that it probably isn't the Burgundy chased down with absinthe that is making the chap visible; apparently, that's one of the Manor's old spectres...

The Chinook is circling over the cottage darling and i've prepared trays and trays of glorious Bramble and Liquorice Jam Tarts - one for every guest to be handed out by my own personal valet... The Viking and I will be with you shortly... just need to finish these glasses of champagne and we'll climb aboard!... lucky the time difference between here and there will mean we'll arrive just in time... can't wait to see you!

Tess! How kind of you to let me come ... Christina Hendricks is already giggling in that annoying way she has ... I brought her along because she has several cases of Johnnie Walker ... where can I hang my trenchcoat ... it's damp ...

Heavens! We're back - down at the Scioto I left Dinosaur Hand with my date and caught a fish! Of course I fell in, could have used Christina Hendricks as a floatation device, damn the luck!Would Stevens mind very much cleaning this 90 pound sailfish?...strange how it wormed its way into your neck of the woods. Oh, and Jimmy's friend Harvey mentioned he might stop in later for some toast. Does he do that often?

Stevens loves cleaning fish...let's get you out of those wet clothes and into something warm...hope you don't mind my robe being pink...Harvey does hang around the manor a lot...with or without Jimmy...

So thrilled to be invited to your ball this year, Tess. Barbara (Bee) Lake informed me that she had shipped ahead a few oak barrels of Trinidad Rum and my date, Captain Jack Sparrow, and a few pirates he brought along are making sure it arrived safely. Might be the last we see of them. But if you see a pirate send them to me.

Also looking forward to meeting our other Magpie Tales friends that might be coming. Now off to dance.

Pssssssssssst! Hey ... Tess? Yes it's me, disheveled, without a date, no dress, nothing. I'm sneaking over in the midst of preparations for the landfall of Frankenstorm. Sadly I'm needed in Washington DC and will only have time to pop in and out. I'll stay in the kitchen, if that's OK. The caterers are giving me shots of Absynthe, probably not such a great idea in terms of me being productive when I get back to the District, but it will no doubt make the work more interesting. Have fun! Cheers!

I got caught up with the normal Sunday jet setting. Finally we managed to up and go. Everyone is here and having such a grand time. Lovely! Helen, you are having a lovely time. I am sorry Stafford is not here...

I see my past dates Leonard and Joseph have decided to sulk and not attend as I am here with THE MAN of my life. Ah well... I can't help it.

Dear all, I must regretfully bid you all adieu and farewell! I have many miles to ride and must leave you now, to these delights... Dearest and most noble lady, Tess, adieu! And thanks for your gracious hospitality! : )

I adorn the walls and shadows with a shirt missing the iron and a black suit missing a tie. My hands travel to my face to fiddle with my forgetfulness and trace the lines of unshaven stubble. Perhaps I shouldve combed my hair too... Anyway, my eyes are finally accustomed to the light and my mind is bent over the stories in front of them.

Oh, I was verklempt that the storm was going to keep me from your lovely event! However, I am finally here and am so happy!!! You may, however, have to shelter me and my date, the distinguished Sir Soni B., if my house floods while I'm away. Don't worry, though. I have an ample supply of his dog food stowed in my car! He does, however, snore (men!)

R.A.D. Stainforth reads my poems

I pledge to read the printed word

I adore the scent of old paper in secondhand bookshops, the
dance of words on a page, gathering odd things like a magpie, fresh flowers, woolly socks, keeping company with art, the thrill of film, and
concocting an occasional culinary delight for the people I love.