While I can agree with Jim, I can also agree with Dave. If someone can't handle the truth, don't ask the question. I know there are times when you should consider the other person's feelings but isn't honesty the best policy.

Honesty may be the best policy Cheryl and I do try to practice that with gentleness to avoid offending if I can BUT, I am never going to tell my wife she is looks fat in that dress or that dress looks like something a hooker would wear or an old maid would wear. I value my life over total honesty. <>
Jim

Must be a husband thing. Whenever I ask my husband if something makes me look fat , he always says "Doesn't matter if I say no, you don't believe me anyway." He is right, I don't believe him. As for my son, that's another story. There was a time a few years ago, when I weighed barely 100 lbs. after dieting way too strict. I developed all kinds of medical problems. My son, who's lucky he made it to 20, told me "Mom, maybe you had the medical problems all along and they were covered up by the fat." Another time more recently, my loving son told me, "Don't worry about how you look mom, I think you're beautiful. Even if sometimes you look LOPSIDED AND LUMPY." Mind you, I'm not 100 lbs. anymore but I'm also not fat. Guess some people can be more honest than others. I now no longer ask MY SON how I look or if I look fat. I'm alittle afraid of the answer. <VBG>

I really think the "fat" thing is not the issue. I prefer to call myself "cuddly" lol. (something that losing ten or fifteen pounds would unboubtable cure) That being said - it all depends on how you dress. If you have extra rolls (like I do) cover them up. Nothing looks worse that too-tight clothing on a fleshy body. Someone once said that the backside of a chubby person in tight jeans looked like "two pigs wrestling under a blanket" lol. The same goes for underweight people - too much skin and bones showing is also not attractive. Fortunately we live in a great part of the world where wonderful clothing comes in all sizes for all budgets - though my dh says I don't seem to have one - a budget that is - VBG. Go - enjoy. I know I do, and I always take pants with elastic waists - who can resist all that food. TTFN Jennifer

To beging with i am 5'9" and weight about 210. I dont look it but it is true. I never wore bikinis before because i was solid(not fat). About 3 years ago we were on 7 mile beach. I looked to my right and there was a women who weighed i would guess about 450 to 500 lbs and she was wearing a thong bikini. Wow what an eye opener. From that day forward i thought hey if she can do it i can do it better. I figure if you dont like the way i look dont look. Another thought is that i will never see you people again so i wear my bikini with confidence(and a little sucking in the belly haha). I think all it takes is confidence to feel great no matter what you look like. I figure on the ;inside i am 5'9" and weigh about 180 very curvy pounds.

Oh Shelly, that is NOT an eye-opener! That is something that would make your eyes slam shut and be afraid to re-open! <> If you have those great cruves then go ahead and flant them. If you are , well a normal person then you might wear one and I don't think anyone would care. However, if you are in the 450-500lb range then unless you are the worlds tallest woman then do not wear a bikini or thong! Same goes for us guys too BTW. I have been told by some very reliable and honest women that you do not look good in a thong or a speedo, not that you would ever catch me in one!
We did once see a woman who was in the 5'2" range and probably 300 lbs who was proudly walking around in her bikini on ship. We really had to look twice and closely as you could not tell if she had on bottoms without looking very closely. Not pleasant. One should be comfortable in their body but also reasonable and other should not make fun of their wieght. Choice of clothing yes, weight no. <G>
Jim

Whoa, I am sorry but if that picture( Dave the wave) is not retouched, then that is just gross. She may be a nice person, and I wouldn't not be friends with her because of her weight, but I am not going to pretend that her body is anything but deformed. And I can honestly say( which some people are just so politically correct to do) that if I saw that particular women eating a bag of candy or an icecream I would probaly stare, because I have never seen anyone kill themselves so slowly , and painfully.

Second, why are there always posts by "fat people" asking if it is " ok " to be fat on a cruise ship. If they have read the posts of "fat persons" before( which the OP said she had) then they know that 99 % of posters see no issue with being overweight and enjoying a cruise. It seems like they want constant reassurance that their weight will not be an issue.

Your weight is the same on land or sea. How you are generally treated in public on land is most likely how you will be treated at sea. Most people are nice, some are not.

PS, I am not a skinny person, and I am not obese. I have however been quite heavy, but have be able to get within a healthy range so I don't hasten myself to an early grave .

Good for you! I was happily married for 8 years, 12 years overall. Now I am happily single. Or as Autin powers would say:

"My Vanessa, my bride, my one true love, the woman who taught me the true meaning of monogamy, was a fembot all along (looking forlonly at her severed hand with the ring on it after she blew up in their hotel room)......Wait a tick! That means I'm single again!!!! Oh, behave!"

Gee, I lived in Germany for three years and never encountered a a name like helmet show-ing! Actually, the percentage of fat people in the US far exceeded that of fat people in Germany. Germans seemed to enjoy getting out and walking a lot, which is something most of us have forgotten how to do.

"Whoa, I am sorry but if that picture( Dave the wave) is not retouched, then that is just gross."......if I saw that particular women eating a bag of candy or an icecream I would probaly stare, because I have never seen anyone kill themselves so slowly , and painfully.

I beg to differ. Have you ever watched anyone smoke a cigarette? More people die everyday of smoking-related illnesses than morbid obesity. Lung cancer is the most prevalent cancer in men AND women, not to mention the associated problems of coronary events, strokes, blood clots, COPD. Don't get me started on second-hand smoke.

Yeah, but you can look good smoking a cigarette. There are more health problems with being fat than smoking. Now if you are fat and smoke, then you will surely have problems. "It is better to look good than feel good."

Speaking from a person that was 115-125 before kids to ... well I won't go there now, go and have a good time. (I was in a car accident 8 1/2 mths pregnant and wound up almost doubling my weight due to the accident) I'm now starting to feel good enough to start working out. Hopefully I can loose a few before the trip. I just want to tell my story so when a person of smaller size realize that not all of us "fat people" eat ourselves to our weights. May have medical conditions, including depression.

P.S. my child was okay after being in intensive care for 6 days. Doctor's couldn't say it was/wasn't because of the accident. I also try to wear appropriate clothing for my size. I don't want to see someone like me in a thong bikini or daisy dukes!!

A fit punishment for you fat bashers would be to have to go on predisone....or better yet, watch the movie "Shallow Hal" until you get it. Being overweight is the last legally discriminating factor in our society, even beyond child molestation (Jackson) Murder (OJ), war crimes (Hussein or Bush, take your pick), age, sexual preference, talent, intelligence, race or gender. And the funny thing is, it cuts across all of those equally.

I cannot believe that this thread is still going on, about the appearance of other people. Medical science has yet to scratch the surface ass to why some folks are skinny and some are fat and some are "normal" (although the definition of "normal seems to change from time to time.) There are issues of metabolism, intestinal make up, genetics, and too many medical factors to list on a cruise board. Bottom line, very few overweight folks are "gluttons." In only very few cases is it "their fault.." It's like the fact that I'm short --- and I did nothing to cause this condition.

Cruises (and everywhere else) will be beter places when we start to evaluate folks by what's inside, not outside appearance.

Richard I fully agree with you! I can understand because it is not my fault I am so incredibly handsome and well-built. People are all the time staring and it is embarrassing. Some female perfect strangers even approach me and want to do all kinds of things to me that would harm my marriage and health. Again, it just isn't my fault at all and I wish they would just treat me normally.
Jim