Happy Birthday baby, 11 years old and fresh and green and sparkling And ready to face whatever 7th grade has to throw at you And I wish I could hold you now Wish I could tell you face-to-face what I have to write in this birthday card

Like sexual assault is not a way to measure whether boys think you’re attractive It’s not funny when they open your shirt and reach in You don’t have to laugh And when your friend’s say that it’s “because they like you” It’s not You don’t have to agree to this But you'll shrug with uncertaintyAnd soon enough you will That if ever a boy grabs your wrist to keep you from leaving Yank down as hard as you can and run Head for the mother fucking hills Before he grabs you by your hair Pulls you to the floor And steps on it just to keep you there That if ever a boy has to pull you from the door And trips you as you try to get away It is abuse And that when you hit your head against the wall and he blames it on you Don’t believe him You were right to pull back You just should have pulled harder Should have screamed louder Maybe someone would have heard you But more than that he should never have touched you It wasn’t your fault And yes, his manipulation is just as dangerous as the back of the other boys’ handsAnd it’s scarier, sneakier That at 18 And it’s the first time your boyfriend gets five inches away from your face To scream at you Don’t cower against the door Baby, turn around, you have that option And no matter how much he tells you he loves you It’s not love And you’ll of course believe that it was But love doesn’t have to fight in the woods without your cell phone The two of you all alone Love doesn’t get the cops called on it because you are screaming at each other Too damn loud Love doesn’t have to fake injuries Just so you can’t go to Denny’s at 1 o’clock in the morning Because god forbid you get home after he’s sleeping At 16 When R***** pushes himself inside your unconscious Limp body You have to call it rape It will take you 5 years almost to the day To say it out loud In front of a crowd full of people You’ll wish you never had to see again But baby, once you do, don’t stop saying it Don’t stop shouting To hell with anyone who gets uncomfortable by that word Rape And when the next boy hits you 1, 2 In the face With Dani in the back seat of the car Laughing because she didn’t see what happened in front of her Don’t smile and act like everything is fine Don’t grip the wheel and tell yourself"he didn’t mean it" 1, 2"you shouldn’t have been driving that way anyways" 1, 2And it will take you 30 minutes to confront him about itIn his roomTo say “never hit me again” ‘Again’ Because you still believe he’s worth every second chance And he’ll cry He’ll tell you it’s okay if you want to go away He won’t blame you if you don’t want to stay And you shouldn’t But you will And he’s going to leave you It’s going to change the way you breathe To short (huh) little (huh) gasps (huh) But only for a little while And you’re going to want to sleep through it all But get up Get out of bed Get stronger So strong that every time you get knocked down, and you will The cement is left imprinted with your hands from pushing yourself up again So strong that every man who ever delivered angry words With the back of his solid hand Will break his knuckles on your cheekbones But don’t you ever give him the opportunity to think he can do so So strong that you rock the hell out of single So strong that you can love for real So strong that you can be vulnerable again So strong that you know not to hate all men So strong 10 years later11 minutes passed midnight And I’m hoping 21 sure feels great Happy Birthday