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Monday, June 29, 2009

Monday, June 29, 2009

Looks like her folks are still using the same bakery, though. (Piles of dead leaves are such a "hassel", aren't they?)

This next Wreck sees Amber's "hassel", and raises it a "taffle":

If only it had been in quotes - "taffle" would leave so much more romper-room for the imagination, don't you think?

Speaking of lots of room, Courtney M. asked the bakery for a Star Wars graduation cake, and this is what she got:

Well, Courtney, there is a lot of space...in space. So, you know, it could be a metaphor.

Where some Wreckerators call it a day after a lime-headed Yoda and a plastic grad cap, though, others keep going, and going, and...

...going.

'Scuse me, Mr. or Ms. Wreckerator, but I think you missed a spot. Could you cram a few more "09"s on the top? Oh, and while I have you here, a few questions:

1) What are you congratulating math for?2) Does that inscription really say "this book is for smart people only please donootatemple to open if you are not smart"?

It does?Ok, then my next question is...

3) For the love of crossed-out-but-not-corrected spelling errors, why? I mean, wouldn't only the really dumb people try to open a cake that only resembles a book in that it is somewhat flat and rectangular? Or am I over thinking this? (Don't answer that, Wreckies; I'm talking to the decorator here.)

Jess K's mom ordered a graduation cake for her brother. To keep it simple, she asked for the cake to read "Woo-hoo Tommy!" Instead, she got:

Unintentionally appropriate with a side of sneering sarcasm. I like it.

Sabrina S., Jess G., & Maureen, you each get a gold star beside your name on my monitor. (Granted, this may make typing a little more diggifult, but fortunetly I learned to typr by touch.)

ROFLOL! That's hilarious, I wonder if Cake Bakeries around the world wait for girls named Amber to come, order a cake, so they can wreck it....

Also I think you have that second cake entirely wrong, you see Rhianna just graduated from a vocational school, see? Oh you don't? Well She went to a Candy Making college, with a masters in the taffy-puller. So that cake was supposed to say "The Taffy's worth the hassle" yeah......... That's it....

On the first one: since the whole phrase is in quotes and obviously they're quoting SOMEONE since someone...ah...attempted the same phrase on the next cake, are the quotes REALLY that wrong on the first one...?

I mean there's plenty of other things wrong, like how it's feeding time for the leeches up in the corner! I'm just not really having a problem with the quotes.

I AM having a problem with congratulating Math! Why does no one want to congratulate Physics!?

Jayspec is right on the theory. Although it's not a ligature-s, it's a Long S. I formed a currently ſolo movement to reſtore the uſe of Long S to common language. The only reaſon it was abandoned to begin with is that printers were lazy and cheap. So I've ſtarted uſing it in daily writing where appropriate. many of my more learned friends underſtand and have no problem with it. Others ask me why I'm writing Fs inſtead of Ss :)

Not to echo the other Melinda (I need an avatar to clear up any Melinda confusion), but the Boo-Hoo Tommy cake was my absolute favorite. I was reading along grinning until I got to that one, then I burst out laughing.

jayspec said... "The second cake is clearly using the f-shaped ligature-s, fashionable in the 18th century."***********************Okay...I'll bite. WHY, then, is the word "Hassel" NOT making use of the same type of "s"? Both words are on the same cake, for corn's sake.Wait! Wait! I know: the cake was STARTED in the 18th century, and FINISHED in the 20th.Yah?

I think the Math cake is hideous, but it does have some promise. I think the scribbles are attempting to illustrate a corrected paper by a teacher. I think the cake is attempting some sort of mental flashback of 12 years of school. Still VERY poorly executed.

Amber's and Christian's cakes both have a mortarboard-on-a-black-saucer thing going on--what's up with that? Since WHEN do mortarboards have BRIMS on them?It looks weird.I mean this sincerely: aside from that small glitch, the cakes are truly lamentable.

I really want to know how the decorators even let these abominations leave the store! The Yoda one is hilarious just because of the weirdly placed "decorations" and the lettering that gets bigger and smaller throughout...

Is there a difference between Wreckers and Wreckies? Like with the Star Treck people? Some of us just enjoy Cake Wrecks and know the terminology and can reference our favorites, and some of us go driving from bakery to bakery searching for Wrecks, and even attend conventions dressed up as our favorite Wreck? If so, I believe that my invitation to the last Cake-Con was lost in the mail. I *totally* would have come as a naked baby on a carrot.

MalMal said... "... I *totally* would have come as a naked baby on a carrot."********************* And would you be sporting a Mohawk haircut as well? I'll ask this, too (as long as we're riding the train to Fantasy Land): Where would you get a big enough carrot to ride in on?Ahhh...the images cavorting in my mind (of a carnival-like atmosphere for a "Wreckies" convention) are MORE than tantalizing...! =^~,~^=

Did anyone watch Cake Boss tonight? The Doves in the cake idea freaked me out alot, but the execution was incredible!And those "exotic" cakes as Cake Momma called them. ahem, um... well let's just say that they were incredibly detailed, and the client very happy. Jenny, did you see it, and what did you think?

Actually, I think the baker of the Math! cake is getting a bum deal. I think the person ordering it brought in the graduate's math book and asked for an exact duplicate of the cover. Hence, you have a monstrosity of bored and somewhat deranged writings of various unknown persons over a multitude of years. (We all know how much time passes before they spring for new textbooks.)

For a math graduate, this cake must be sort of depressing. It just screams "Congratulations for getting a degree in absurd gibberish that I'm not gonna pretend like I care about! Here, stuff it with a square root with a plus sign."

The...ahem, "patriotic" cake with the airbrushing...all I could think of was that the eagle had eaten a boatload of mixed berries before he took flight over THAT cake...urgh.

Also, that MATH!! cake clearly has a mistake...7 divided by a does not equal oddly-angled different-colored 09. That's just fail.

(Hey Crazy Cat Lady! "wv" is the word-verification thingie we have to type before our comments will post. For some reason, the ones here at Cake Wrecks are--like Cake Wrecks itself--awesomer than the rest, and thus are very receptive to having Wrecky definitions made up to fit them. For example, mine:)

wv: aphicke. The cake looked as though it were infested with aphickes; then again, perhaps some pesticide might have improved the flavor.

@MalMal:Alrighty, then! That's settled.We'll watch for such a gathering, and I'm confident that all in attendance will be on the lookout for a naked, Mohawk-headed person with a HUGE carrot. I agree: Olivia should be barred from our convention. There has to be *some* measure of decorum.=^~-^=

I don't think the words are crossed out and not fixed... There is a brown squiggle nowhere near a word. I think those are poorly placed confetti/streamers. I guess that would mean the spelling is just atrocious.

I'm going to go against the crowd and say that I love the math one. I think it must be a joke, crossed out spelling errors, nonsensical messages, it must be a wreck on purpose. Math's celebrators hopefully asked for it to be that ugly.

I just pre-ordered a cake to say, "Happy New Years! Congratulations on Your no Babies '09. For Serious, bros. Mission Accomplished!" the baker kind of looked at the form, asked me if I was sure that was what I wanted, repeated it back to me, checked the punctuation and capitalization, and asked me for a color scheme.

I've read a little bit about handwriting analysis. In the "Boo-Hoo Tommy" cake, the Y has a little claw on it. People who do that feel guilty about something and subconsciously try to create reasons for people to get angry at them.

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