محاولا ان ابداء من جديد

ولكننى مولاكي

و ساظل مولاكي مهما تحاولين

و لتأخذى العشاق بين احضانك

فلن تحسى بقوتك و ضعفك

بعلوك و دنوك

الا بين احضانى انا

فانا مولاكي

لن تحسى بأنوثتك و رجولتك

الا بين اناملى انا

فانا مولاكي

الا تعرفين؟

لن تعرفى النشوة و الجنون

الحرية و المكتوم

الا على شفتاى انا

لن تجدى من يعرفك مثلى

من يقبلك مثلى

من يقراء عيناك ككتاب مفتوح

مثلى انا…فانا مولاكي

مهما تحاولين

ولكنى اتسال

هلى ساظل انا احبك؟؟

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The Way I See It: I have been writing from a Woman’s point of view all my life, I started to wonder what men would say in their poems!…When men fall in love it is usually so different, the way they show and express their love is different. Their love is as true, strong and real as our love, I don’t doubt it but I guess the conflict comes when women insist on being loved as they do love men. Which so hard to happen, and unfair to be honest since men are different than women so how can I ask him to express love as I do? Then we go on labeling them as indifferent, don’t understand and seal it with they don’t love us anymore. I strongly believe that we can reach a common ground, if we, as women learned how to decode their language or rather actions… and they, as men, learned how to hug us for no reason, kiss us for no sexual needs and hold our hands in front of our girlfriends……simple eh! Not really I know and this is why the question remains: will love conquer our differences? Me personally I believe it’s a YES providing we work on overcoming our differences ..being in love alone can not guarantee a long lasting relationship…anyone can fall “in love” but it takes lots of work to stay in love…

I grew up in a society who injected in my mind a belief that girls don’t initiate talks with boys they don’t know! Bullshit

The Egyptian Revolution (ER) changed me thousands miles away. I don’t know Omar yet I initiated a talk with him and told him I want to be his friend! Never done it before and it is liberating to see how your actions change when your beliefs change …!

Who is Omar? All I know that he is an Egyptian in Canada full of passion to his homeland. Omar loves to write and I am quoting him here explaining what writing means to him: “Writing has always been a great therapeutic way to simply express myself, and whatever emotions I might be feeling are somehow gracefully replaced with a peaceful easy one”. If you want to follow Omar’s blog, here is the link http://oneluckysoul.blogspot.com/

The Way I See It:

The connection between Omar and I is two countries and a revolution. I wanted to publish and share Omar’s recent article about the Egyptian Revolution for many reasons, to name a few: a) a very good article documenting the ER (Egyptian Revolution) series of event since January 25, 2011 b) the article is written by an Egyptian in Canada c) he took the time to elaborate in his article with good analysis.

Omar thank you for simply being “You”, keep up the great therapeutic ways you’re using to let people around the world know, understand and think about the ER. I hope you will appreciate this article as I did. “Bread, Freedom, Social Justice”…Egyptian Revolution (ER) demands! مستمرة الثورة

Love & Light

Noha

The Final Straw – By Omar Cherif – February 8, 2012

Ironic is it that the nerve and tear gas they throw on the protesters are all expired, when SCAF and all of their crooked aides are the ones who are visibly expired? How could this country of old possibly think they could win this war when 60% of the population is under the age of 30? In just one year after Mubarak relinquished his powers to the Supreme Council of Armed Forces who, geared with their obvious political incoherence, the chameleon Islamists and weapons, they succeeded in adding all kinds of people to their growing list of haters.

The 16,000 civilians in military prisons were mostly activists and represented the first under-the-belt blow in trying to contain and paralyze the revolution. The second phase was to ruin the reputation of the same revolution they kept glorifying in all of their communiques and which got them in power in the first place.

Divide and conquer came next, they called for elections on a referendum about vague amendments in the old constitution in March, ignored them and naively considered the results as the people’s way to say yes to military rule. Then, they declared an even more ambiguous 63-article provisional constitution while completely disregarding the necessity of writing a new one as the first building block in the transition to a real democracy after January 25th.

Following the growing rage in the streets, they had no other option but to jail Mubarak and some key members of the old regime in well-equipped remodeled prisons with their mobile phones and I-pads. Most of them are facing ridicule minor charges compared to what they had really done while others were left roaming free, giving their full loyalty to preserving the generals and the fraudulent system they now have full control of. People like Omar Suleiman, the ex-intelligence head who allegedly, has later become the security adviser of the Saudi King, is a clear example as I’m sure he knows too much to follow the rest behind bars.

Then came buying the loyalty of the lower ranks of the police and army by doubling and tripling their salaries and even promoting some of the higher officials. They know quite well that they are worth nothing without those few million brainwashed soldiers and they will stand no chance in front of an unlikely internal coup. They Hired a Prime Minister from the old regime, never restructured the Ministry of Interior, kept the useless attorney general and stroke a deal with the Islamists and already gave them the majority in the new “revolution” parliament. All part of that evil plan which might sounds successful at first but it sure isn’t enough to stop the youth from dreaming of that better tomorrow they keep seeing on the near horizon.

Finally and as we’ve seen lately, is deliberately scaring the public and its silent majority by some made-up armed robberies on banks, cars-hijacking, impeding hikes in fuel prices and shortage in gas cylinders many need for cooking. Anything that would make the people blame the revolution and force them to think that they are better off under the military rule. Mubarak was threatening before his fall that it’s “either me or chaos” and SCAF are following in their mentor’s footsteps, not learning that the power will always go back to the people.

Then again when all failed, they went back and attacked 17 human rights organizations and detained 19 NGO American workers while hiding behind the lame excuse of “outside funding.” Maybe forgetting because of old age that everyone knows that they are the ones who are being funded with 1.3 billion dollars every year, paid by U.S tax payers.

What a devilish, thorough plot but again not enough to bring the unfrightened genie back in the bottle. One day history books will explain how and why they failed, and also how and why the revolution lived on and succeeded.

I believe that with the help of the intelligence agencies and the police, SCAF initiated the attacks in Abbaseya, Maspero, The Cabinet, Mohamed Mahmoud St. and just recently the slaughter of a minimum of 74 Egyptians from the Ultras Ahly fans in Port-Said. Failing every time to throw the blame on the peaceful protesters, they shamelessly keep mentioning invisible hands and fingers and unknown 3rd parties. Every killed soul has a family and loved ones and all what Tantawy could say while commenting on the tragedy with his shaky, stuttering voice was: “Uhh….why are the people silent? Aren’t the attackers also from the people? Everyone should take part in this!” Does that show anything other than the head of the nation and its army inciting a civil war while talking to National TV in times of crisis? Will the people now take to the streets to fight thugs and defend themselves as he watches it burn? The same low-level wicked mentality as that state TV lady presenter who kept asking her viewers to come protect the injured and helpless Egyptian army forces from “armed” Christians around Maspero.

Following a sadly long list, there is Anas the Ultras youngest martyr who was only 14 years old who went to a soccer game just 1 hour away from Cairo, and came back in a coffin. There is also Omar Mohsen the 19 year old AUC student and Karim Khouzam, the Jesuites graduate who lost their lives in the same unfortunate events. It doesn’t take a genius to fathom that the police forces and consequently SCAF, since they have a hand running each ministry, are clearly the ones to blame. The Member of the Parliament, Ziad Al Elaimy visited the Ministry of Interior just a few days later only to find that SCAF’s General “El Assar” is the one really puppeteering the whole institution.

Many correlated accounts show that what has happened after the soccer match between Al-Ahly and Al-Masry on February 2nd, was indeed a strategically well-organized crime. First, there was an armed theft of a large number of tickets just a few days before. On the day of the match, there was a poor overall presence of police forces who usually are by the thousands on heated events like these. No one was checking for tickets at the entrance gates as no one was being searched. Moreover, the governor and the Chief of police who usually never miss such popular matches didn’t show up and another police high official was later caught on camera silently watching by the side lines as all the commotion started after the end of the game. We all saw the videos and pictures of the police standing by watching as the attackers were sprinting towards the Ultras’ side of the stadium. One of the officers was disgracefully caught filming the clashes with his own phone.

As for the gates, the ones between the two teams and the field were left unusually open and unguarded, and the one and only exit for the Ahly’s Ultras wasn’t only locked but also welded from the outside. What a perfect sinister crime!

To top it off, right after the referee blew that final whistle and the thugs planted in between Al-Masry fans stormed the field from everywhere and attacked the players then the cornered Ultras, the stadium lights were cut off. The attackers were then seen armed with batons, knives and light sticks, showing that it’s all very well-orchestrated! As the ruthless killing of those young boys was taking place, the army personnel, what was left from the police forces and the few ambulance cars who were right outside the stadium gave themselves an exceptionally fair time of 45 minutes to actually get inside and intervene according to many testimonials. Corpses were later divided upon several surrounding morgues but the military hospital kept the highest number of bodies, denying any entry and refusing to give out information.

Against all odds, Al-Ahly was unexpectedly beaten 1 – 3, showing that there is no apparent reason that Al-Masry “fans” will actually go KILL the Ultras instead of celebrating. Finally something had to take a wrong turn, but again it was too late and again, too many young lives were lost. Many, including eye witnesses believe that the killers were death squads sent by SCAF under the watchful eye of the police. “This was not a normal soccer game fight. As Ultras, we are used to those and know how to handle them but this time they were there to kill and they knew very well what they were doing,” said one of the wounded survivors.

A state of national mourning followed everywhere and on social networks as well, where it was said that you can really measure the seriousness of the tragedy this time by not finding any creative jokes or sarcastic witty posts that usually follow any significant event or major accident in Egypt. TV networks added a black ribbon and state TV declared their own way of mourning but they were showing belly dancing by day 2. When the mood lightened up a little, I remember a specific post about the mother of one of the martyrs saying that her 18-year old son died and was getting all the unworldly and insensitive responses according to what was said in real; Tantawy: “Yes, it happens, we’ll give you money in return.” Ganzoury, the 76 year old P.M: “I haven’t changed my jacket since last night.” Ministry of Interior: “I gave my orders to the forces to remain under utter control.”

The governor of Port Said: “Why should I resign?” And finally the parliament: “We’re holding an emergency meeting for the 1st time in 40 years!”

Of course the short satire ends with the poor mother addressing God, and being told that retaliation is eventually coming. Who else could she turn to when everyone else who’s paid to do so is washing his hands and giving a blind eye to the seriousness of the catastrophe?

I believe targeting young football supporters because of their siding with the revolution and their popular chanting against SCAF is the final straw leading to the demise of this still-Mubarak regime. A nationwide call to civil disobedience has been answered by most prominent universities around Egypt including the American University (AUC), Cairo University, Ein Shams, The German (GUC), Nile, Al Azhar, the French, Canadian, British, Russian universities and others. Along with a few schools like The Jesuites (proud to be a graduate) and the Lycee, syndicates including 2 million workers have also declared joining with an open strike on February 11th, marking the 1st anniversary of the toppling of Mubarak.

The military owns 40% of the Egyptian economy and their products range from oils, jams, water, electronics, to owning hotels, restaurants, lands and gas stations. “They are not just providing a service but they are also profiting,” the boycott SCAF product campaign’s Twitter said. I’m sure all this power and might that have been piling up for 60 years will not be willingly given away on a silver plate, not even hidden inside bombs, they must be bravely taken away. The famous 1970’s optimistic and smiling activist Kamal Khalil said recently: “Their power means billions, fortunes, secret accounts and dark black boxes, it’s not like giving back an apartment.”

Civil disobedience has successfully worked with Gandhi in kicking the Brits out in the 1930’s as well as in 1989 Poland where after numerous strikes, the military gave back the power to civilians. It’s the last peaceful resort and I believe it should exert tremendous pressure on SCAF whom I’m sure are still day dreaming about that safe exit they will never reach. Loosing revenue will never really equate with loosing a son or an eye but we remain a peaceful revolution which is part of its beauty.

Too little too late as usual, they are now offering to start the presidential elections sooner than it was agreed upon as if by doing so, they are offering “The” life-saving solution to the current dire situation they got us into. They are either forcing themselves to forget or are in complete denial that in less than 1 year under their sorry rule, 2286 protesters were killed, 7811 were injured, 334 lost their eye(s), 685 of broken bones cases, 27 virginity tests were taken and 16000 were unlawfully jailed, and not a single person has been held accountable yet! Some are still wondering why there is a growing rage in the streets and why all these people have chosen to peacefully yet manifestly bring attention to the ongoing injustice by calling for a civil disobedience to end this kleptocracy once and for all.

Some revolutions take years to complete and ours will keep going until the military junta hands the power to a real elected president and government and until the army goes back to the barracks. It will also keep going until all SCAF members are tried for the crimes they have committed and are still willing to commit towards the Egyptian people and humanity. الثورة مستمرة

Your love was like Niagara’s rushing water… used to hit me …and hit me …and I loved it

It used to take me from high up, push me, rush me far down…I hit your rocks…a big splash throwing me again high up like a Queen…and here we go …you push me, rush me, I tug and wrest while falling ….and once again …a splash….

I loved falling so hard …hitting your rocks; that was the ecstasy! …I was breathlessly, carelessly, dreadfully, heavenly, perfectly falling in love with you …over and over and over…

I kept falling day and night.. Up and down…till one day I fell into nothingness…

No rocks, no splashes, no drugs, no screams, no dreams, no arms, no tears, no whispers, no queens, no ghosts, no fears, no rush, no pull, no push,….. Nothing……..

I kept falling with nothing to hit me, stop me, wake me up, not sure I am up or down……… just one endless moment of eternal falling into nothingness…..

That’s the absence of your love………..

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The Way I See It:

The hardest moments are “after the fact”, after you tried your best to keep your love story as alive as you can …it’s after YOU are convinced that there is nothing you can do will bring it back to life. Hearing this inner voice, coming from within, saying “We lost it….” It’s this moment of putting your story down into this huge grave where all “ended love stories” rest in peace. It’s this nothingness, silence, mourning, emptiness, clueless, wearing feeling – That hurts the most….

But then …after a while ….you have to take a decision, to choose, either to keep standing on it’s grave…falling into nothingness …re-living over and over the same memories or to leave a rose, sealed with a kiss, throw a small written note, saying “Remember me….” then keep going and move on…having the faith ..That if you could fall in love once…you can fall in love twice…..if you believed in love once…you can believe in love twice…and above all ….choose to believe in yourself ……and believe that falling in love was never wrong or a mistake! Love is this thing that reminds us “No matter how tough we played in this life…there is always “this look” from “this someone” that will makes us melt on our seats…transforming us to rushing water…splashes… hit……..up….down……..falling…….

Like a hot rushing shower after a long dayThat night… they made loveThey shared this mutual look of satisfactionShe squeezed herself from underneath his arms…There is this little place…They knew it’s hers …it’s her “skin pillow”She always puts her sweaty head on itAnd they get too close to smell each others’ tiredness, Weariness and love There…. they usually share their last drops of words …- I love you …- I love you too …(squeezing her head more and more) In her sacred space in between his shoulder and head- You know …if you leave me …I will never believe in love again- ………(smile)…….(kiss)……….I will never leave you ……..“Later on in the story …”She is trying to sleep ….alone in her bed….Can’t find a comfy position for her head ….This is the 5th pillow she bought this month….None of which were snug…like this space between his shoulder and head…….She had tears in her eyes ….crossed her hands …and said:“God give me the strength to believe in tomorrow …and I will buy a new pillow!”The Way I see It: it’s only this “believe” in tomorrow and our determination to end our suffering in the “present” that lead us to overcome the greatest pain……..So if you are still there in this moment of searching for your “skin pillow” just keep believing that you can change it ..no one else will do it for you …not him, her, them or even God “unless YOU ask him so”….

Today don’t be a coward .. You ARE better than that, move forward no matter how hard you got hit …this is how winning is DONE…..!.

Love & Lights

Noha

Let me tell you something you already knowThe world ain’t allsunshine and rainbowsIt’s a very mean and nasty placeAnd I do not care how tough you areIt will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you will let itYou me or nobody is gonna hit as hard as lifeBut it ain’t about how hard you hitIt’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forwardHow much you can take and keep moving forwardThat how winning is done!Now if you know what you worthThen go out and get what you worthBut you gotta be willing to get the hitsAnd not pointing fingers sayingYou ain’t want you wanna be because of him or her or anybodyCowards do that and that ain’t youYou better than that

I knew Nada from school (Collège du Sacré-Cœur) as a young girl full of energy and fun, last time our roads crossed was in Sharm El Sheikh 2004 and again to me she looked full of energy and fun, I wouldn’t have imagined what she is going through.

Today I want to talk about Nada Shatila as a young inspirational Egyptian woman who talks in this video about her cancer(Leukemia) struggle of 10 years. Nada takes us into her journey; a journey filled with moments of defeat, uncertainty and anger with God. She takes us through 10 years of pain, joy, love, divorce, death and surviving.

Nada’s speech is full of inspiration. One of the sentence she said “And again I asked GOD why me? And then one day I said Why not? If everyone kept saying “why me”, no one will ever experience anything”. She also said “when my doctor gave me the new medication, I took it home and had a discussion with it, I said: “I love you” and “you will cure me and take care of me” and I literally kissed it”. When I heard this part I smiled as Nada used her believing, positive thoughts along with her prayers and yes, the medication cured her 95%.

This is what is meant by “And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. Matthew 21:22 (King James Version) . It is what Islam says about (believing and thinking good of Allah and that Allah gives us what we expect from him good or bad” also pray to Allah “Certain of receiving”).

I hope all of you will be inspired by Nada’s story and to believe that everything happening in our life is nothing but an experience. Where we learn something to grow and shine. Sometimes the experience is heavy, hard-hitting but this is when we grow a million feet higher and shine like a bright sun in a hot summer day.

Today choose to believe in something, kiss your book, your car, your CV, your partner, your mum, your dog, your kid, your best movie’s cover, your best song’s CD, your lucky wallet, your dear plants, and yourself and say “I love you and you will take care of me, together we will go through this (whatever it is, that you are going through now)”.