Tuesday, November 29, 2005

November Novel Writing Month

OK, I've decided to go ahead and start. I don't have time to register with the site because time is so short so I'll just start now. This is an erotic thriller set in a large library in a mid-sized city. The library is attatched to a high school. The book is called

Smooching in the Bloody Stacks

Chapter One

Bob and his boss, Roger, were playing footsie under the reference desk as they were simultaneously emailing Bob's wife. Bob was writing that about how he couldn't wait to get home and lay her down and Roger was writing about how he couldn't wait for her to wear Bob out tonight so she he could enter through the broken sliding glass door of their home and murder his underling and free the woman he loved from the insufferable nerd next to him. "The insufferable nerd with the tiny dingus," he thought and then typed. He saved the draft as a teenager from the school came up to the desk.

"Can I help you?" Roger axed.

"Yeah, um...which way is the restroom?"

"It's behind you..."

"...and to the left" Bob interrupted.

God, I hate when he does that, Roger thought. He bit his tongue and did his best to bury his rage. The times when Bob would interrupt him while he answered the simplest questions almost caused Roger to throw himself down the stairs in front of the desk in hopes of breaking his neck on the way down. Jesus, did this tool sitting next to him actually think he was incapable of telling a brain dead teenager how to get to the fucking men's room? Was it a contest he was playing with himself to see how rude he could be before being told to fuck off? It was illogical and had no answer. It just made Roger more anxious to whack the dill hole.

"Roger," Bob whispered, "You're hurting my foot."

"Oops, sorry. I guess we should stop for a while."

"Yeah, I guess so. You were pressing down so hard I thought you were going to break a bone in my foot."

"Sorry, go back to emailing your wife. I'm going to play Yahoo Billiards."