filth is a great way to learn, stupid! sure, anyone can learn dumb words about ‘which way to the airport?’ and ‘how much is that used panty?’ or whatever, but if we are really going to have international world-type peace, we need to understand each other’s TRASH. because it’s the common denominator of all countries.

not everywhere has square watermelons or WORLD’S LARGEST JESUS STATUE or Longest Ball Of Twine, or the Eiffel Tower, or Most Deadly Pufferfish or whatever. . . but we ALL have A BUNCHA SHIT WE GOTTA THROW OUT.

so, without further ado, here’s HOW TO TALK DIRTY IN JAPANESE.

(Shit, i had no idea this was going to be a gag. seriously, i bet you guys all saw that coming a mile before i did.)

plain ole garbage is ‘GOMI’.

thus, garbage full of bottles is …:

. . . BOTORU-GOMI.

(The citizens of Ookubo do not heed the elephant. )

for instance, next door to my house is a BARBER SHOP!!

OJIICHAN NO KAMI NO GOMI. old man hair!!

KITANAI GOMI (dirty garbage)

MAKUDONARUDO no GOMI

GOMI GA TAOSARETESHIMAIMASHITA. (literally "the garbage is in a condition of having fell down!")

TAIRA na GOMI (flat garbage)

TOBAKO ni KANKEI ni GOMI (garbage which has to do with tobacco)

SEMAI GOMI (narrow garbage)

HATO ni TABERARETEIRU gomi (the garbage which is eaten by the pigeons)