Relating without manipulating: overcoming codependence

There’s a new article on our companion site sexualsanity.com about the topic of manipulation-free relationships. It starts out by saying:

Without understanding our motives, we can easily lapse into behavior aimed at manipulating others. We can do this by passive-aggressively punishing them, or doing things that seem kind and sweet as a way of getting them to respond to us in a certain way.

Here are just a few examples:

Sulking is a means of letting others know we are displeased and forcing them to attempt to win our approval.

Flattery is a false expression of approval that we don’t really feel – giving others good strokes for our own purpose.

Withholding deserved praise is a means of putting others down, something we’re likely to do because of our jealousy.