Nick Lachey: Why We’re Waiting to Have a Second Child

Asked what surprised him most about fatherhood, the 98 Degrees singer tells PEOPLE: “Just how intense it all is. I mean, honestly, it consumes everything you do, every decision you make. Everything in life is completely turned upside down by this little guy.”

“We’re incredibly blessed,” he told PEOPLE Monday at TV Guide‘s Hot List Party in Hollywood. “He’s slept through the night since he was three months old. I mean, he’s an angel. But really, everything you used to do — and you’ve done for the previous 38 years — now it’s all flipped around.”

“My brother and I are two and a half years apart, so I think we’ll wait a little longer,” says Lachey. “It’s good to have … enough separation that they can feel like they have their own identities, and they’re not right on top of each other.”

“I get up every morning with him, feed him breakfast, we take a walk together,” says Lachey. “[Vanessa] works during the week, doing Dads on Fox, so she has less time during the day … The thing I love about him is he’s a tough kid. I can wrestle with him even though he’s only 13 months old. We can wrestle and do the guy stuff.”

My sister and I are 18 months apart and we have our own identities, thank you very much. It’s really up to the parents to make sure the kids grow up to be their own individuals.

Sam
on November 10th, 2013

My sister and I are 16 months apart, me being the older. She was blonde. Cuter. Spoiled. I was “older”. I have negative memories that seem to stand out. It changes who a person is/can be.

However, I think it absolutely has lots to do with the parenting. If you are not ready for another child, don’t have one. Good for Nick to recognize, and be responsible about it.

Amanda
on November 8th, 2013

That has to be one of the most odd reasons for child spacings I have heard. My older two and my younger two are 20 months apart and they are completely different in almost every way possible from appearance to personality they definitely have their own identities.

I wanted my kids close together so they felt like they grew up together. My brother was 6 years older and I really don’t have many childhood memories with him because by the time I was really old enough to remember anything he was more interested in being with his friends. I love him but I imagine it’d be different had we been closer in age. There are pros and cons to small and large spacings but personal identities is an odd one.

Sam
on November 10th, 2013

No, it isn’t Amanda. It’s a very mature, responsible and honest choice to make. If Nick feels that way, then it is exactly the choice he and his wife need to make. As parents we need to recognize how we can ‘handle’ two babies, or a toddler/child and a baby. Cool to read he has thought about it and is living it.

klutzy_girl
on November 8th, 2013

Ala and Amanda he is just speaking for how he feels about the situation he isn’t referencing you two or how your lives are, at all. Get over yourselves and quit getting defensive about what a stranger says.

Xan
on November 8th, 2013

I think spacing makes sense. It’s healthier on the mother’s body, and indeed, allows each child to be “the baby” for longer. Ålso, my friends who were closer in age were always being compared with each other by their teachers in school.

cbaker
on November 8th, 2013

they could be like tori spelling or jessica simpson and be popping another one out before the body is healed from the first one. they seem like great parents, doesnt matter if they never have another one. their choice.

Ala
on November 9th, 2013

@Anonymous: so basically anyone speaking an opinion, based on personal experience, that’s different from a celebrity’s (opinion and experience) is full of themselves and shouldn’t speak? Congratulations on being such an open-minded person!

Anonymous
on November 10th, 2013

Why is it anyone’s business if and when they have another child. They seem like a nice family but this article is just a name plug for promotion.

Sam
on November 10th, 2013

No Ala, that’s not what she said.

Actually, that is what Nick was doing. Speaking from personal experience.

Me too.

Jay
on November 10th, 2013

I think he just didn’t describe it in the best way but I get what he means. It’s really personal preference. I think the best reason is that you want to spend as much one on one time with each kid possible and having a baby so close in age to the first your focus is now split. They seem like a lovely family. Camden is really too adorable!

Anonymous
on November 10th, 2013

LOL I was getting the popcorn ready for the comment section… all the offended mothers – get a life!

ge
on November 10th, 2013

Their son is only 13 months old. My older two are 20 months apart. Both are boys and they get along very well. For me I was older and had a hard time conceiving baby number 1. So, I was not concerned about spacing my children, I was just happy to have my children. Every parent should decide what is right for them and their family. Their son is still young. Even if they waited years to have another it is their decision. We should not judge.

Holly
on November 10th, 2013

Easy on the wrestling nick. He is still a baby

alayna
on November 10th, 2013

That’s good that they realize the work that goes into raising a child. I just hope they don’t wait too long. My parents wanted to have a second child and they waited a little after I was born but due to my mother’s age- already mid 30’s they couldn’t keep a pregnancy. It doesn’t always work out the way you want and sometimes it’s real easy the first time but the 2nd, 3rd etc. not so much. Just think it through.

Louise
on November 10th, 2013

To be honest, it sounded like the spacing issue was for Nick and Vanessa, as much as for the children. Camden completely changed their lives and consumes all of their time – by Nick’s own admission, they are overwhelmed. So, it stands to reason that they would want to take a break before they add another child to the mix.

guest
on November 10th, 2013

You don’t owe anyone an explanation as to why you are waiting to have another child. As long as you are a good parent and raising your child to be a good person, you can wait as long as you want.

Meia
on November 10th, 2013

My kids are 21 months apart and it was the best decision my husband and I ever made. They are best friends and I feel life would be so much more lonely without both. Not that I disagree with his decision because things work differently for different people. But just because your close in age doesn’t mean you wont have your own identities. It mean you get to have your best friend with you all the time 🙂

Love him
on November 10th, 2013

Class act! He seems like a down-to-earth married/family man who loves his wife and son. Kudos to you for waiting.

Ariel
on November 10th, 2013

He must have seen an example of the identity thing, which is probably why he mentions it as a concern with siblings very close in age. It does depend on the parents, I think, and since he is already conscience of it, his children won’t have any problems.

dudley doright
on November 10th, 2013

luv nick… J Simpson should not have let this cutey get away…and Vanesaa scooped him up right away! Smart Girl.

Cant believe nick is 40…wow…he looks great.

Johanna
on November 10th, 2013

My brother and I are 16 month apart and we totally have our own indentity, we both have a strong charakters.

Kay
on November 10th, 2013

I, personally, feei like three years is about ideal spacing. A 3 yr. old is becoming more independent, less demanding on your time and attention. (a two-yr. old you don’t even turn your back on).

denise
on November 10th, 2013

Honestly, it’s no ones business how many kids they have and when they have them.

Anonymous 2
on November 10th, 2013

@Ala, I have to say I agree with @Anonymous, the way both you and Amanda phrased what you were saying makes it sound as if you are offended by what he said and as if he was speaking of everyone. For example you said “Thank You Very Much” which really makes it seem like you’re terribly offended and can’t believe he would say such a thing about people. And Amanda said “That has to be the most off reason for child spacings I have heard. My older two and my younger two…” as if he were referencing her. Like @Anonymous said, get over yourselves.

Karen
on November 10th, 2013

Did anyone think of it as a dig towards his ex-Jessica and how she had 2 babies close together? With him being 40 I wouldn’t wait too long!

guest
on November 10th, 2013

That was my first thought too!

Anonymous
on November 10th, 2013

Our girls are 4 years apart. Husband and I didn’t want two in diapers at the same time, and we definitely didn’t want two in college at the same time.

KB
on November 10th, 2013

@Ala – I get what anonymous is saying. You didn’t just state an opinion you got quite defensive about it to.

I do agree it’s all what the parents make of it to but honestly my sister and I are 8 yrs apart, we were close and still are. Not saying it works for everyone but the siblings have a choice as well. I like the idea of at least 2.5 yrs as well as I have had many friends have their kids back to back and the first always seems to have to grow up faster. They still need their mom and mom is always busy with the baby, mom also gets exhausted and that’s not good either.

Sam
on November 10th, 2013

Agree completely with the last parts of your post KB. Well said.

Anonymous
on November 10th, 2013

I agree with him. I am a triplet with a brother two years younger…it is hard. My daughter is almost 3, and we are expecting our next child when she is 3 and a half..I like 3-4 years apart. The child gets to grow up w/ all their parents’ support, without having siblings to complete with.

Amanda
on November 10th, 2013

Me and my older brother are 9 1/2 years apart and were more alike than any other pair of siblings i know that are under 2 years apart. I guess he still tries to act like hes my age again while people who are closer in age tend to act different because there to used to being around each other all the time.

Edie
on November 10th, 2013

You know, it’s their business. Why Hollywood feels the need to share everything and then get upset if people disagree is beyond me. Personally, I don’t give it a thought and I doubt many do. You have a lovely family…enjoy it together…not with the entire world!

Athina
on November 10th, 2013

Actually, it’s you and Amanda who are not very open minded.

Kathy Carpenter
on November 10th, 2013

It amazes me how people will get insulted or take a statement so personally that only pertains to his views for HIS family. I mean seriously is the man not allowed to give HIS opinion on something without the VICTIM POLICE criticizing him?

BBB
on November 10th, 2013

How can people get so easily offended? Gees. I doubt he meant to offend anyone with his comment, it’s just his opinion. I’m sure he’s aware that it CAN work out but he’d rather not do it that way.

Zoe
on November 10th, 2013

I think they’re doing what works for them whatever the reasoning I think the main thing he’s saying is it will happen when they’re ready and that’s just imo smart parent planning. I have always liked Nick before he married Vanessa and I couldn’t be more happier for them both. Things will happen as they should.

Big Fan
on November 10th, 2013

Mine are 15 months apart and are like night and day in every way. On another note, Nick gets better as he ages. My Gosh is he sexy!

Lita
on November 10th, 2013

I think it probably is a dig at ex wife, Jessica, for having two so close together. Who really cares people?

Abi
on November 10th, 2013

my sister and i are 14 months apart and my dad and his brother are 11months apart, it was great having a play mate that was basically old enough to do the same things as you but I also like the thought of a 2 and half year age gap, personally thats what I want because I feel thats just right (dont really have a set reason its just a feeling I have) everyone is different and there is NO right or wrong answer to this question, whatever is right for that family.

Melissa27
on November 10th, 2013

What does Nick Lachey do for a living currently? Serious question, not trying to be shady.

he’s 40. how old does he think he can be and still run after a baby. he’s tired now? its not as if having an active 5 year old and a new born at 45 will be less tiring.

guest
on November 10th, 2013

She’s probably already pregnant. They always have an article like this right before the news hits it seems like… not just them, but other celebrity couples.

Ramona
on November 10th, 2013

it’s no ones business when and if they have another child, why does he feel the need to explain anything?

kara
on November 11th, 2013

He does not seem smart by any means. And, after reading this, I realized that he is not too crazy about being a dad.

penny green
on November 11th, 2013

Why do people get their panties in a wad when someone is asked a question and they answer and it’s not what people like or want to hear? I mean is he supposed to say nothing,try to word it just perfectly as to not offend the millions highly sensitive little whine bags? They are married and making a nice living, they can have another baby when they want and for the reasons they want. Sounds pretty responsible to me to actually plan and think about a very important decision.

TORI
on November 12th, 2013

Love Nick and am thrilled for him that he has finally found a woman who truly loves him and is blessed with being a dad! All haters get over it and get a life!