Ten Ways To Ease Painful Mood Swings Without Taking Pills

Ever bounce from good mood to bad---maybe three or four times---even though nothing in the real world has changed? You have plenty of company, especially during the emotionally charged holiday season.

Millions of Americans take pills to temper their mood swings. In 2011 drug makers sold $11 billion worth of antidepressants; antipsychotics (to battle more debilitating afflictions like bipolar disorders and hallucinations) added another $18 billion.

Then there are millions more who suffer from the kind of mild-yet-discomforting moodiness that leads to bad decisions---like selling an undervalued stock or bickering with your spouse---but doesn’t merit a prescription.

This is Steven Berglas’ territory. A practicing psychologist for 30 years and former clinical professor at the Harvard Medical School, Berglas specializes in helping top executives and athletes deal with stress, burnout and other cognitive tumult---and he’s full of practical advice on keeping harmful volatility in check.

There are a number of so-called cognitive distortions that make things seem worse than they really are and thus trigger bad moods. Hence Greek philosopher Epictetus’ observation: “People are not disturbed by things, but by the view they take of them.”

Here are five common distortions that Berglas says we should avoid:

1 Polarized Thinking. This mental malfunction describes the tendency to see the world in black and white. If you’re not built like an NFL linebacker, you’re a skinny wimp; if you’re not a CEO of a multibillion corporation, you’re a worthless failure.

The Fix: Computers deal in zeroes and ones, but humans shouldn’t. Instead, put things in context by assigning some rough numbers. Example: That last big sale might have fallen through, for example, but maybe you’re still batting over .300 for the year.

The Fix: Dust off your high school statistics book and recall that one data point is virtually meaningless. Think Tiger Woods ever worried that a bad round meant his whole season was in jeopardy? Please.

3 Fortune Teller’s Error. This distortion arises when you have no real information about an important issue---so you fill the void by concluding that no news is bad news. Say you thought a job interview went well, but the company is taking its sweet time getting back to you. There’s no reason to believe the news is bad, yet the lack of info is cause for despair.

The Fix: Prepare for bad news (get busy setting up more interviews) but don’t develop an ulcer.

4 Personalization. Our wont to link negative acts to unrelated outcomes---“Hurricane Sandy ravaged my basement, so God must have it out for me!”---is another insidious distortion.

The Fix: Lose the arrogance. Remember that you aren’t the center of the universe---and be very thankful for that.

5 Externalization. We often credit our moods to outside influences rather than to their true source. Say your physician observes that, at 5’9” and 230 lbs, you need to lose some weight. Chances are, you take the news at face value and conclude that your doctor would rather have you cut back on the Krispy Kremes than court diabetes. On the other hand, if your girlfriend says you’re overweight, you might---if you’re externalizing---feel that she’s blaming you for having no self-control. Wham! Now you’re in a foul mood and she’s the reason---except that the real reason is simply that you need to drop weight. In your physician’s hands, that fact is mere data; in your lover’s, it’s the source of embarrassment and distress.

The Fix: Don't lard simple facts with false meaning. If there's a real problem, get to work on it. Also try turning your would-be assailants into allies by asking for their support.

Act And You Shall Receive

Berglas points out that you don’t have to think your way out of a funk---you can act your way out of one, too.

To understand why, consider what’s known as the James-Lange principle of emotion, developed independently by two 19th century psychologists William James and Carl Lange. James and Lange theorized that emotions are responses to an idea or experience. Example: You run from a bear because you know it can tear you apart. Conclusion: “I'm afraid of the bear because I'm running from it.”

Research has shown that the James-Lange principle works in reverse, too. If our bodies move in particular ways, our moods will align accordingly, depending on the context in which we’re moving.

One experiment involved two groups of people with fake electrodes attached around their lips and chins. Without any further explanation, the first group was asked to form of a smile, while the second was told to wear a frown. Afterward, the subjects were handed comic strips while the “electrodes” were being “calibrated.” Result: The people previously asked to smile enjoyed the comics more than those asked to frown. Action dictated mindset.

With that theory in mind, here are five ways to act your way out of a bad mood:

1 Channel Your Inner Warrior. Acting brave on the outside---with head high, chest out, and gaze firm---often helps you feel positive and strong on the inside, says Berglas. Even more stabilizing is the feedback from others who, through non-verbal cues, recognize and respect your strength.

2 Throw Your Weight Around. Going to the gym helps, but only to a point, warns Berglas. While releasing endorphins and squeezing extra reps can put you in good spirits, bad moods can sap vigor and hurt performance---so cut yourself some slack.

3 Drink Less. A couple of cocktails can settle your nerves, but not for long. As your body processes the alcohol, dysphoria---an emotional state marked by anxiety or unease---soon kicks in. “By the time drink number two is in your hand, the problems associated with booze have already begun to outweigh the benefits,” says Berglas.

4 Do A Spring Cleaning (Any Time Of Year). Many bad moods begin as “I’ll-never-get-there-from-here” self-defeating statements. Clutter---the real kind, not emotional baggage---is often responsible. Purge to-do lists over a year old; “good books” you’ve started three times but will never plow through; and clothing that will never fit unless you contract malaria. Not only will your mood lift, you’ll have more energy for the stuff that really needs your attention right now.

5 Help Someone. Two benefits here, notes Berglas. First, the time you spend on the activity (cooking dinner, running an errand, whatever) is precious time away from whatever is bothering you. Second, the sense of accomplishment is dependably fortifying---as is the gratitude of the person eating your homemade lasagna.

For more advice on putting life and business into healthy perspective, check out the following articles by Steven Berglas: