Nothing Wrong With Sorry

Maybe it’s just me. I’m very conscious of distinguishing between the use of “I’m sorry” and “I apologize.” But there’s a difference. I am sorry is an affirmation of self. It’s a declaration of how you feel at a particular time. We hurt somebody’s feelings. Or we get into an argument. We step on somebody’s foot … smudge their Puma.

There’s nothing wrong with saying or feeling sorry for someone or something. It happens. It’s natural. I can distinctly remember hearing, when I was little, someone always responding to someone saying they were sorry with “Sorry doesn’t help it!” And it’s true. “sorry” in and of itself doesn’t do anything. That’s because being/feeling sorry or expressing that you’re sorry does not necessarily prompt or invoke action. I’ve found, however, that apologies are often followed by some kind of redeeming action. We may apologize for our words. We may apologize for our actions or inactions. We may even apologize on behalf of other people, or as a result of the way somebody else feels. But usually there’s some kind of step taken to address whatever we are apologizing for, even if that step is as simple as a hug or a handshake.

The thing to keep in mind is that sorrow is a personal feeling that may be the result of something we did, or may be the result of something somebody else has done. But it’s about us. We can feel sorry for a lot of things without apologizing. And until we do, the issues or concerns go unaddressed. The more important realization, however, may be the fact that an apology does not require us to feel anything. We don’t even have to be wrong in order to apologize. Sometimes we apologize because, simply put, it’s the right thing to do. And once we do so, we can usually wash our hands of it, because it’s not the other person’s responsibility to accept it and move on, or let it linger.

About the author

Chazz Woodson

Recognized as one of the most electrifying players in the game, Chazz Woodson is also a high school basketball and lacrosse coach in Miami, Florida. He's a driven, goal-oriented man with a passion for spiritual and intellectual growth, writing, education, and serving others. Follow Chazz on Twitter