This is a video of a bunch of Russian dipshits on a precarious looking roof sledding off with a homemade bungee cord (which may or may not be a bunch of soiled bedsheets tied together) attached. I was convinced the stunt would prove to be certain death, but somehow the girl (note: ALWAYS make the girl go first) survived to scream her f***ing face off and smack into a wall. Just kidding, she doesn't actually hit a wall, but damn if I wasn't praying she would. "Uh -- GW? You shouldn't really waste prayers on hoping somebody gets hurt." YEAH? WELL YOU SHOULDN'T REALLY WASTE YOUR BREATH TRYING TO CHANGE THINGS THAT NEVER WILL. Learn to pick your battles, Napoleon!

Thanks to alpha dog, Mark, Aaron, joshua and Banana Swing, who'd have done it sans bungee for $1 million provided they get the money beforehand and you turn your back while they jump in their car and speed away.