Been
a while, I know, sorry… -_-' I can only write this kinda stuff
when it's quiet, and it only is at my house at like the middle of
the night…and until lately I couldn't get the pc that late. n.n'
Hopefully I'll get back on track with my Oyako fluff…I've been
deprived, you know. .

In
completely unrelated news, I had my heart-broken today! YAY!

Shutting
up.

Disclaimer:
I own nothing.

The
sea breeze wafted onto the boardwalk, the scent of its brine almost
able to be tasted to passerby. Gulls cawed as they circled around the
boats and the markets, greedily looking for any opportunity where
they could swipe a fish from the ships or from the vendors selling
them on the docks. Palmacosta was a thriving, beautiful place; the
largest city and hope in the dying world that was Sylvarant. Over
this area the motley group of adventurers made their way…they
didn't quite seem to be the type, but they were in fact the group
of the Chosen of Regeneration-

Who
had just tripped and almost knocked an old man into the water.

THUD.

"Oh-!
I- I'm sorry!" she said immediately, getting to her feet as she
apologized to the elderly man.

"It's
all right, young lady," he smiled weakly, trying to calm down after
being startled, "I didn't mean to be in your way- I should stop
doing this I guess…"

"Stop
doing what?" Lloyd asked, blinking at the man.

"Well…"
the man sighed, looking off into the ocean, "…You see, my son
went on a fishing trip a couple of years ago and…he never came
back."

Though
they didn't quite notice, the eldest member of their group flinched
somewhat, his wine eyes briefly darting over to the brunette boy who
was paying no attention to him as he listened to the old man's
story.

"Everyone
tells me to give up on him, but I still wait here…" he sighed,
looking out into the water, "I don't care, I won't give up on
my child…"

Kratos
abruptly turned and walked away, causing confusion in the group as
the mercenary simply left them. Colette hurriedly wished the man the
best before they followed after Kratos, leaving the old man to sigh
and go back to his sea-watching.

"Um…Mr.
Kratos? Are you all right?" Colette asked, looking up at the
mercenary.

"I
am fine, Chosen," he stated simply, though there was a tone of
sadness in his breath.

"But-"
Lloyd started.

"I'm
fine," he snapped coldly.

And
that was the end of that.

-

"Hey
um…Kratos?"

Lloyd
frowned to himself as he watched the elder male looking out the
window of the inn room they shared out to the sea, his usual silence
even more uncomfortable than usual. The teen always became so
exasperated with him- though lately less and less because of his
intimidation, and more and more because of…concern. As much as he
hated to admit it, Kratos was starting to become less of an obstacle
and more of a role model. He had been training him for a while now,
after all, and he was beginning to develop a bond with the man.
Still…why was he always so distant with him? True, he was distant
with everyone, but at times it felt as if Kratos was just trying to
ignore him, whereas any other time Kratos looked at him like…like…
Well, he wasn't sure. His eyes were…soft, reassuring, almost-
almost-

Lloyd
shook his head with a light groan. Agh, what was it?! What was it
about Kratos that felt so…so…?

"What
is it?" Kratos' voice cut through his thoughts, finally answering
his question.

"H-
Huh-? Oh! Yeah, sorry…" Lloyd smiled weakly, rubbing the back of
his neck, "I was just wondering if you were okay, I mean, you kind
of seem- you've been acting upset since this morning."

Kratos
said nothing, responding only by turning his head from the window and
looking at Lloyd sadly. The hairs on the back of his neck stood on
end; why was he looking at him like that? What kind of look WAS that,
anyway? Kratos' cold eyes were so…sad, but not. It was like he
was looking at something precious but something that was- maybe
like…maybe like something precious that he couldn't have?

"No,
I'm fine," he stated again.

Lloyd
sighed loudly as the man turned back to look out the window.

Damn
it!

Well,
what else could he do? If Kratos didn't want to talk, he wasn't
going to, simple as that. With a defeated sigh the teenager plopped
down onto his bed and began to take off his boots and jacket, fully
ready to just go to sleep, why not? He…

"Kratos,"
he said again.

The
man looked over his shoulder at him, silently acknowledging him.

"I…um…"
he trailed, biting his lip, "Kratos I-…nevermind."

Then
he rolled over and went to sleep. He was only that way for a few
minutes when Kratos slowly drifted away from the window, his hand
hesitantly hovering above Lloyd's head. His fingers almost reached
the brown hair before he jerked back, turning from the boy.

"…Sleep
well, Lloyd…" he whispered, walking back to the window.

The
teen opened one eye, wondering what it was the man said a moment
before closing his lids and drifting off again. Kratos was so
strange…so alien, yet-

So
familiar…

-

"D-
Kratos…"

The
Seraph looked up at him as he walked toward him from across the yard,
the light from Dirk's house not even making it to the gravestone.
Kratos merely looked at him silently, Lloyd feeling his throat
tighten up as he saw the flame glow in his father's reddened eyes.
He tried to say something, really he did, but he couldn't think of
the right words. It was only recently he'd discovered who this man
really was, why it was he was so familiar, but still it didn't seem
to make anything any better.

"What
is it?" he asked in his usual, emotionless voice.

"Can…
Can I talk to you a moment?" he stammered, feeling his cheeks
blush.

Kratos
tilted his head to the side briefly before nodding, opening his eyes
again simply.

"We're…going
to fight Mithos tomorrow," he said simply, "in the morning, as
soon as the ring's made…"

The
man merely nodded again.

"…We
could die," he said lamely, as if expecting something.

"I
suppose so," Kratos said simply.

That
wasn't what he wanted to hear.

"I-
Is that it?!" he blurted, his heart instantly beginning to pound in
his chest.

Kratos
looked taken-aback, flinching slightly at the teen's outburst.

"Lloyd-?"

"Is
that all you have to say?! Is that IT?!" Lloyd shouted, a snarl
beginning to work its way into his mouth as he clenched his fists
tightly to his sides. "You 'suppose so'?! We could all fucking
DIE- I could die
tomorrow and that's all you have to say?!"

"Lloyd,
what did you want me to say?" Kratos frowned, hesitant in his
question.

"Well
what do you think?!" Lloyd shouted in the man's face.

It
wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all, didn't Kratos get it?! He'd
just barely learned he was his father, and just barely managed to
sigh in relief when said father didn't die at the Origin seal. All
of this, and what had the man said to him?! Absolutely NOTHING!

"You
could- you could say-" he stammered, his anger fading away into
crushing sorrow, "you could- you could say SOMETHING! Something you
should say! Like- Like something-"

He
took a deep breath.

"Like
something I want to hear, duh!" he shouted at the man. "Like-
like what that man said!"

"Hm-?"

"Remember?!
In Palmacosta?! That old man…he said that- he said he was going to
wait for his son, remember?! He said he was going to wait for him,
that he wasn't going to give up on him, no matter what-"

"Lloyd,
I would never give up on you-"

"You're
missing the point!!" he shouted again, tears brimming in his eyes.
"He- He said something like a FATHER! He-?! Can't you-!? Why
can't you do the same thing?! I- I know it's not like you,
really, but I- but I-"

Lloyd
gave out a frustrated growl and stomped his foot on the ground.

"What
have you done that's been like that-!? I mean, what have you said
that's like that?! You gave me your locket, you told me about Mom-
I know you love me, so why is it so hard for you to SAY IT?!" he
finished at the peak of his shouting.

Kratos
took a few steps forward, going to put his hand on Lloyd's
shoulder- which only made him mad. Sure, NOW he was trying to do
something affectionate?! And that was it?! A freaking hand on the
shoulder!?

"Lloyd…"
Kratos whispered, his eyes misted, "What is it you want me to say?"

The
teen gave an angry huff that quickly broke down into sobs, falling
forward and crying softly into the angel's chest, his fists still
clenched.

"Tell
me that you love me you bastard!" he shouted, giving him a light
pound on the chest with his fist. "Tell me that-! Tell me that I
mean something to you! I'm sick of- I'm sick of all this vague
crap you give me and expect it to be enough!"

He
knew he looked pathetic, and he felt pathetic, but he couldn't
quite break out of it. Was it so wrong? Was it so wrong that he was
frustrated that his own dad didn't care enough to…?

"Why…why
can't you just tell me-? I could- one of us could die tomorrow, and
you know it, so why can you STILL not tell me that I mean something
to you-? Shouldn't…shouldn't a father say that? Shouldn't a
parent tell their kid that they mean everything to them, especially
if- if it might be the last chance?"

Kratos
said nothing but began to lightly rub Lloyd's back, feathering
through his hair with his other hand as he let the boy continue on.

"Can't
you just tell me that you love me?" he whimpered, closing his eyes.
"I know you do; I know you do…but I- I just want to hear it, K-
Dad! I just want to hear it, please! Please just tell me…"

He
didn't know why it was so important that he heard it, but it was.
For some reason it felt like if he didn't ever hear it, it wouldn't
ever really be true. It felt like it could be taken away from him,
that if it was put into words then all of the other things he did
would just…fade away. That all the other signs that he loved him
would just disappear. He knew it was stupid, he knew that, but…but…

"Is-
Is it because I didn't say it?" Lloyd stammered, clinging to his
father closer. "Is that why? Because I didn't call you Dad? I'm
sorry…I'm so sorry I didn't do it earlier. I just…I just…"

"No,
Lloyd, it's not that," Kratos shook his head, "you're
absolutely right. I…I have not been a very good father. I should be
able to say things like that, yet…"

There
were a few moments where all Lloyd knew was darkness, the wetness on
his face, his heaving chest and the pounding of Kratos' heart
beside his head.

"Lloyd,"
he stated, "…I love you. I love you more than…more than I can
ever hope to explain."

His
breathing eased somewhat, finding himself hooked on his father's
words.

"…You…you
are the only good thing I've ever done for this world, Lloyd," he
whispered softly, "When you were a child, you were the thing that
sparked hope in me, and ever since I found you again…you were the
only thing that made me even dare to hope."

Lloyd
sniffled a bit, his breathing almost completely back to normal at
this point.

"If
I ever lost you again, Lloyd…I…" he trailed off at this point,
hesitating before he found his voice again, "I couldn't even
stand to breathe."

The
teen was quiet for a moment, running his father's words through his
head again and again, trying to engrave them permanently into his
memory. Yet still…it wasn't quite…

Kratos
enveloped him in a full hug, his child almost instantly clinging to
him in response.

"You're
precious, Lloyd," he said in a hush, "more than anything else.
More than anything."

Lloyd
felt a smile spread on his face as the tears renewed, this time with
a different emotion driving them. He shouldn't have needed this, he
told himself, but…but it hadn't felt real. It hadn't felt like
this man truly was his father, like he hadn't really loved him. He
knew it was a stupid, childish, selfish impulse that drove him to
make his father do this, but…but he needed it.

"I
love you," the man whispered.

He
wanted to know he had a father.

This
mainly taken from my feelings toward my own father. Of course, since
my father isn't a stoic bastard like Kratos, I have heard 'you're
the pride and joy of my life', but not 'I love you'… 'Love
ya' sure, but not a serious 'I love you'…

That
aside, I hope it wasn't too cheesey. n.n'

The author would like to thank you for your continued support. Your review has been posted.