I always wanted a really cool tita. Like the one who would buy anything for me (within reason) behind my parents backs. Like the one I could hang out with to get away from all the stress from school. Like the one I could brag about to the whole world. Like the one I could run to when I hit an all time low and she would just hold me and say nothing because she understands.

In other words, I want a tita like Laverne Cox.

For those who don't know, Laverne Cox is currently one of the phenomenal women of today in American media. As a transgender woman (male to female), Laverne has been through a lot in her life. At the age of 11 she attempted suicide because she had developed romantic feelings for a male classmate of hers. Through the years she has suffered at the hands of bullies in school and society for not acting to the assigned attitude of her sex, just like any other trans teen. But of course, if there's anything commendable about her, it's her courage. She pushed on and arrived where she is now. (x)

First Transgender woman

To be more specific, Laverne Cox has achieved the success she rightfully deserves. She has been dressing in glamorous dresses for the red carpets of award shows that she has been nominated in. She is the first openly transgender woman to be nominated for a Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series for her role in Orange is the New Black (x).More recently, she is the first transgender woman to win a Daytime Emmy Award for Outstanding Special Class Special for her documentary on seven transgender youth and their stories (x). Not only is she talented in acting but also in producing. She is also the first African-American transgender woman to produce and star in her own show, a VH1 make-over show called TRANSform Me. Slowly this woman has been appearing in magazine covers, from Allure magazine and more importantly TIME magazine.

The success Laverne Cox has achieved in her life so far serves as a beacon of hope for transgenders everywhere. It is important to remind them that they are capable of so much unlike what society tells them. It is important to get representation in media these days and Laverne Cox is doing just that. But of course, she isn't just going to limit herself on the silver screen.

Get the word out

Laverne Cox knows that representation in television is not going to be enough to help raise awareness in America, hell, the world. In this video by TIME magazine, what struck me the most was this part.

"When we look at the discrimination that transgender people face, there tends to be inner sections of race and class. The homocide rate for example in the LGBQT communities in the highest amount trans women and then we look at transwomen who are being victims of violence, most is usually trans women of color. So there's something about race intersecting with gender issues that we have to look at if we're really interesting in ending violence against trans women, for example. And trans people in general. If you wanna improve the unemployment in rate in the trans community, if you wanna stop the bullying of LGBTQU. We also have to look at race. And I think the trans movement and LGBT movement in general really has to be a social justice movement where we look at issues of race and class and you know phobia in general."

She is on another level of intelligence and understanding. Everything that came out of her mouth almost felt like poetry. I didn't know that trans women of color were the most oppressed in the community. I bet a lot of other people didn't know either. Through her words and actions, whether they are speeches in Universities, features in magazines, she always informs her audience of the suffering of the trans community and generally the LGBT community. What's her solution to this? In the same video, she states,

Just be open. Treat transgender people as actual individuals, as actual human beings. Do not pester them about their transition, slightly hinting that they are more of a successful science experiment rather than someone becoming who they truly are after being trapped inside the wrong body since birth (remember that Katie Couric interview?)

This is why I want her as my tita. She understands being different. She will assure me that being different is okay. She gives me hope. She gives me courage. She gives all of us whoever thought that they deserved to die because society tells them to courage to keep living. To fight. To win.

- Anna Caycoillustration by Frances Senoclick on photos for sources

"The reality is that I don't represent the entirety of the trans community. There's multiple experiences and multiple relationships to one's identity. And so it's really about listening to them as individuals in terms of how they define themselves and describe themselves and taking them at their word. Be willing to let go of what preconceptions we might have about people who are different from us and taking people on their own terms."

In an isolated village in the Dominican Republic back in the 1970s, Dr. Julianne Imperato investigated on some children who were girls at birth but turned into boys once they reached puberty. These children were called guevedoces, which literally translates to "penis at age 12" or machihembras which means "first women, then man." Through further study, they found out that these children were actually male psuedohermaphrodites or children that were born with female primary sex characteristics but later on developed male secondary sex characteristics at puberty. This is just one of the many cases of what we now call as intersex.

No, these are not people who automatically have a vagina and a penis or what we call a hermaphrodite, although they also fall into this category. There are eight variables of gender and 6 of them fall under the biological aspect; namely: chromosomal, gonadal, prenatal hormonal and neonatal brain differentiation, internal organs, external genital appearance, and pubertal hormonal gender; so a person can have either a vagina or a penis yet they can have chromosomes that do not align with their genitals or they can produce more estrogen despite having a penis - the situation varies.

These variables of gender are being used to identify newborns as either male or female, but one thing we have to understand is that there are people who are born as neither male nor female and they fall into the category called intersex. The Intersex Society of North America (ISNA) defines intersex as "a general term used for a variety of conditions in which a person is born with a reproductive or sexual anatomy that doesn’t seem to fit the typical definitions of female or male." Although we do not hear much about this, it is actually more common than we think. A study by Anne Fausto-Sterling, a researcher from Brown University, concluded that 1 in 100 people are being born "whose bodies differ from standard male or female bodies" and approximately 2 in 1,000 people are "receiving surgery to "normalize" their genital appearance," and that is just the people with the physical differences - there are also some cases in which the person does not know they are intersex until adulthood.

Now, why are these people and babies, sometimes unknowingly, being forced to undergo medical procedures to fit in our two sex/gender dominated society? Why aren't we hearing much about this? Children all over the world are getting surgeries before they can even utter a word because how they came out of the womb is deemed unacceptable by societal standards. Gender is actually being measured by the size of a child's clitoris or penis and that is very problematic also because this decision will forever affect the child and how that child will turn out in the future. We have to start acknowledging that in our world, there are more than two genders and sexes. Do not let the doctors and what other people deem as normal compartmentalize human beings as only male or female - there are more than two genders.

Cultural appropriation, as we’ve previously talked about last week, is becoming a fast-growing trend among pop culture and its consumers. From bindis to head dresses, some people seem to treat certain cultures’ identifying and/or religious wear into fashion trends; and that is a big problem. This mostly occurs among the current generation of youth with the influence of media, fashion, and music. A lot of other people have spoken out about the issue at hand, and just recently, a video of a young teen icon’s stand on cultural appropriation has gone viral.

You might know her as Rue from the Hunger Games and she might only be sixteen years old, but Amandla Stenberg is more aware of the issues on cultural appropriation than most people are. Three months ago, Amandla uploaded a short video that she and her friend had made for their history class on her Tumblr page. Entitled as “Don’t Cash Crop My Cornrows — a crash discourse on black culture”, she talks about the realities of white people adopting black culture without really taking into consideration what are the important meanings behind the things they have amassed. Particularly she talks about how black hair has become an “urban hairstyle” in the modern world.

“Black hair has always been an essential component of black culture. Black hair requires upkeep in for it order to grow and remain healthy. So black women have always done their hair. It’s just part of our identity; braids, locks, twists, and cornrows, etc. Cornrows are a functional way of keeping black textured hair unknotted and neat but with style. So you can see why hair is such a big part of hip-hop and rap culture. These are styles of music which African-American communities created in order to affirm our identities and our voices….Pop stars and icons have adopted black culture as a way of being edgy and gaining attention.”

She then talks about how some adopt and celebrate black culture but do not seem to care about black people and the currently circulating issues affecting them. She specifically points out how Iggy Azalea has grown to be an “icon” of some sort in hip-hop/rap because of how she has embraced the culture, yet she chooses to ignore and sometimes even contribute to the heavy racism and brutality black people [and even other people of color] experience. Iggy is one prime example of how cultural appropriation as well as racism is being taken ever so lightly by popular celebrities.

“Appropriation occurs when a style leads to racist generalizations or stereotypes where it originated but is deemed as high-fashion, cool or funny when the privileged take it for themselves. Appropriation occurs when the appropriator is not aware of the deep significance of the culture that they are partaking in. Hip-hop stems from a black struggle, it stems from jazz and blues, styles of music African-Americans created to retain humanity in the face of adversity. Which itself stems from songs used during slavery to communicate and survive. On a smaller scale but in a similar vein, braids and cornrows are not merely stylistic. They’re necessary in order to keep black hair neat. I've been seeing this question a lot on social media, and I think it's really relevant, ‘What would America be like if we loved black people as much as we love black culture?’”

We salute Amandla Stenberg for her honesty and for being the right celebrity people should look up to. Not many young celebrities nowadays use their fame to openly express their opinions and to inform others about social issues (of course with an exception of a few such as Tavi Gevinson, Willow Smith, and Maisie Williams). So we are proud to call Amandla as our Woman Crush Wednesday and hopefully she continues being the inspiration that she is to many people, including us!

During dinner, my father was talking about some story that involved his gay colleague and his boyfriend.

"Really? Tito X did that?" I asked.

Then my mom smirked and said, "You should probably call him Tita X."

This is where I get ticked off. I know that Tito X is just gay and not transgender. So I asked my mom if wore girl clothes and asked people to refer to him as a her. She shook her head and said no. "But he is the female in their relationship," she explained. To cut things short, it ended with my mother saying "Walang pagkakaiba 'yan. It doesn't matter."

I can't really blame her totally. In the Philippines, there is a very blurred line between being gay, transgender, and a cross dresser. This is probably because we only have two terms to describe them, bakla, commonly used for gays, transgender women, and drag queens,or tibo, commonly used for lesbians, transgender men, and female cross dressers. Proposing the reality that there are straight men who participate in drag races to an average Filipino would leave them utterly baffled and in the state of disbelief. Proposing the idea that feminine girls can be lesbians would confuse them. And what about those who are genderfluid?

So when do we use certain pronouns when dealing with members of the LGBT community? Let's make our lives easier by educating ourselves, shall we? Firstly, being gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, and asexual are not genders but sexualities, meaning they deal with what type of gender you are attracted to. Gender is whether the person identifies as female, male, or both. It's a lot easier to explain with the diagrams below.

CIS GENDER

When you say you're a cis male or cis female, this means that you identify with the gender you were born with. Gay men can be cis gender and so can lesbians. Pronouns used here would be the same pronouns we're normally accustomed with.

TRANS WOMAN

A trans woman is a woman who was born as a male but identifies as female. What draws the line between a transgender and a transsexual woman is that a transsexual woman has gone under surgery to complete her transition. Drag queens do not fall under the category of trans women because they are a type of entertainer. Straight men or any type of man could play as a drag queen. This goes the same for male cross dressers. To identify a transgender or transsexual woman, you could ask them yourself. But of course not all trans women would be so open. Pronouns used for trans women are she or her.

TRANSGENDER MAN

A trans man is a man who was born as a female but identifies as a male. The difference between a transgender and transsexual man is the same for a transgender and transsexual woman. They should not be confused with masculine women who like to dress in men's clothes or cross dressers. Also they are not just androgynous women. Pronouns used for trans men are he or him.

GENDER FLUID

Gender fluid people can switch from being female to male whenever they want. Their gender identity varies over time and you should just ask them what they want to be called for that day.

NON-BINARY

Non-binary means that some people don't believe they can be just female or male but actually a mixture of both. Commonly used pronouns for non-binary people are them and they. Actually in England, Mx. is a gender honorific that can be used for gender neutrality instead of using Ms. or Mr. It has been slowly gaining acceptance since 2013.(x) Good job, England!

After I did my research, I realized that there are so many other genders besides the ones mentioned. There are pangender (identifies as all genders), trigender (identifies only male, female, and third gender), agender (has no gender) and etc. It's confusing and it will need some getting used to to understand everything. One thing you would learn from all these genders is that it isn't just two options: male or female. It's a spectrum and we have to respect whatever that person identifies as. The first step to openly accepting and respecting that person's gender is by calling them by their proper pronouns. In society, language is such a powerful concept that you have no idea the impact you give when you call a person by their right pronouns.

You've probably heard of this of this phrase before. Heck, you've probably been witness to this on some occasion, like at a Halloween party or a music festival (looking at you, Coachella). But do you really know what it is? Hopefully, this article will help clear up your understanding of what cultural appropriation is

Basically, if it's not from your culture and you use/do it without permission, it's appropriation.

Where do I get this "permission" to take from another culture?

It's not really as explicit as asking every single member of that culture to sign a permission slip to appropriate from them. If you feel inclined to take something that you know is from another culture, it's important to know its significance and history first, especially if it's something sacred. [2]

So I have to research first before I wear/use/do anything?

If it comes from a culture that is not yours, then yes you should research first. Google is your friend.

Why is it wrong or harmful anyway?

Usually, if not always, cultures that are appropriated by "dominant" groups are those that belong to minorities--groups that are oppressed in society. It exploits them and it doesn't give them credit due to them, instead the glory goes to the "dominant" people who have appropriated them. By appropriating their culture, the "dominant" group tends to enforce stereotypes, usually negative ones, of the people whose culture they appropriated. [1] Cultural appropriation is also a by-product of racism.

Who can be guilty of cultural appropriation?

The "dominant" group (i.e. white people) are usually the perpetrators of appropriation.

So if I'm a person of color, I'm exempt from cultural appropriation?

Not at all. If you take from a culture that isn't yours without permission, it's still appropriation. It just so happens that white people are more prone to this because they are considered the "dominant" culture.

Can I appropriate white culture?

Much like reverse racism, there is no such thing as white culture appropriation. Not because there is no such thing as white culture itself, but because white culture is so dominant in society that to partake in it is not appropriation, but assimilation. Sure, minority groups are able to mock or mimic white people and their culture, but it's of no consequence because it does not harm white people in the way the white people's mockery or mimicry of minority culture does. [3] It doesn't work both ways like that. Because the white people are in a position of power, which they attained from years of imperialization, their mockery of minorities is dehumanization; on the other hand, the minorities' mockery of them is merely satire.

What if I just want to appreciate this thing from X culture? Can I appropriate then?

No.

Why not?

Because it's not fair to appreciate this one thing from X culture because it's hip or trendy or "aesthetics." You're taking something from a culture of plenty of people. If you just use this one thing to appreciate an entire culture, it's not appreciation at all. To appreciate a culture is to be respectful of the culture as a whole, including the people who belong to it. Learn about them. Recognize their struggles as a marginalized group. Listen to them when they speak out against their oppression. That's how you appreciate a culture. [4] You still don't get to appropriate the thing you originally wanted to take, but hey, at least you have an appreciation of them, which is what you wanted, right?

Is there ever a time wherein it's okay to take from another culture?

Sure, there is.

When you are invited to participate in X culture by someone of that culture.

If it's a product of X culture being sold, the producer and seller is of the culture and the profit goes to them, not to big corporations that mass produce items that are "inspired" by X culture.

If you go to X country and their culture inspired genuine appreciation in you (not to be confused with going to a country and being an expert of their culture in just 3 days, because that is not cool) so much that you want to share it with other people back home in a respectful manner. [5]

How do I know whether something is cultural appropriation and when is it appropriate to call it out?

Most of the time, it's quite easy to spot someone who culturally appropriates; for example, a white guy doing blackface and speaking in a "blaccent" is definitely racist. But sometimes, it can be tricky. Some aspects of X culture can be found in Y culture. You may encounter someone whom you think is of Y culture but is actually of X culture. [4] Before you go calling someone out, ask them about it first, or if they're a famous person, Google it. Above anything else, be respectful before being ignorant.

How do I avoid being guilty of cultural appropriation?

Easy: don't appropriate. But, if you really want to "pay homage" or "show appreciation" or whatever to X culture, be mindful of the people of that culture first. It wouldn't kill you to use Google, or go to a library to learn more. It wouldn't kill you to talk to a person of that culture to educate you, nor will it kill you to give credit to them if you've taken something specific to their culture. It wouldn't kill you to show support and solidarity for a marginalized culture without being offensive or degrading. [6]

If you really give a damn about a culture and the people who partake in it, you'll do these things to ensure that you're really respecting and honoring their culture and not just appropriating for the heck of it--or worse, to mock or oppress people who are already oppressed. If you don't actually care, well, why'd you read this article in the first place?

- Isis Evangelistaclick on photos for sources

P.S. This article isn't for you to ignore other cultures altogether so you won't appropriate them. We should be recognizing and celebrating our cultural differences, but not in such a way that exploits or degrades other people, especially those whose cultures are already oppressed by years of racism. There are ways to respect and appreciate these differences without being offensive or ignorant.

I don't remember your name, but I do remember that you're the reason why I gave up on ballet the first week. You might not recall, but you asked me what I was doing in your class because you said that I was too fat to become a ballerina. I remember how those words hurt like a bitch, and you were probably the first person to ever body shame me. You definitely crushed the ballet dreams of the six year old me, but I forgive you because you didn't know any better.

To the worst bully when I was in elementary school,

Do you remember that time in fourth grade when you defaced a photo of Emma Watson by making her look ugly and fat, proceeding to tear up the photo into small pieces and throwing them at my face? You were making me put the picture back together so I could see what I truly looked like; which, in your opinion, was an ugly and fat version of Emma Watson. Now that I look back on that incident, I have no idea whether to take it as a compliment of some sort, but back then it was hell of an insult. I mean what the fuck? That was such a horrible and disgusting thing to do to a person! It traumatized me so much that it was brought up in a conversation I had with my high school guidance counselor four years ago. And to this day, whenever I think about, it still hurts just as it did the day it happened. You practically made my elementary years a living hell, and all the things you’ve said to me in the past have hurt my sense of self-worth even up to now. The worst part is that even though you were bullying my through all those years, I still wanted to be you friend because you were popular. I know, pathetic right? How stupid was I to want to become your friend even after all the shit you’ve done that causes a lot of pain in my life? But fortunately after I changed schools, I realized that I never want to be like who you were. I never want to become a person who shits on other people who look different than the rest of society. And the thing is, I don't recall what I have ever done for you to treat me like that but I hope you're a better person now. And I forgive you because you didn't know any better.

To the older kids in high school who bullied me but were friends with my "friends" when I was in elementary,

Now you guys are the ones that confused me the most. We have never met or interacted before yet you chose to ridicule a sixth grader because she looked different; because she was fat. Can we just realize the fact that you were in high school and you were tormenting a kid? Did you not realize from the beginning how mean and terrible that was? What the hell?! Seriously, I want to know why you picked on me so much. What was it about me that made you decide that it was okay to bully someone way younger than you? I don’t get it. I was always so afraid to walk by the high school building because I feared that I was going to run into all of you. You may possibly be the reason why I was always so paranoid that people who are older and more intimidating than me silently judge the way I look. I don’t know where all of you are right now but wow, I genuinely hope that you’ve reflected on this at some point in your life and realized how horrible of a person you all were for that. But I forgive you because you didn’t know any better.

To my Reading teacher in sixth grade,

First of all, it isn't right to constantly ask a sixth grader if she has any plans on going on a diet with an annoyed tone in your voice. Why? Because not only are you hurting a 12 year old's self-esteem at such a young age, but you are also teaching her not to love her body for the way it is. Plus, it is very rude for you to ask those kinds of questions because it is none of your business. Why do you even care? It wasn't like you were slimmer than me, and even if you were, you still didn't have the right to do that. Second, it is also not right to announce to the whole class that you think she's too fat. Third, You yourself have children so how would you feel if someone humiliated them like that?

It isn't okay to body shame your own student. You're a teacher and an adult for fuck's sake; you shouldn't humiliate anyone like that, whether they're younger or older than you. You may have had "good intentions" or that may have been the way of you "helping" me, but all that I ever got out of it was years of self-loathing. You made a young girl realize that she hated herself more than others. I forgive you though, because you didn't know any better.

To all the other people who have body shamed me [or anyone else] whether out loud or in one's own thoughts,

The thing is, the word "fat" and even the word "skinny" have such derogatory connotations in our society because they're used to put other people down. So just stop.Stop giving so much importance on what other people look like. It will get you nowhere.

And to all the people I may have body shamed in the past--I apologize, I don't remember if I ever did,

I'm genuinely sorry. I want you to know that I've learned my lesson. You're all beautiful just the way you are and don't let anybody tell you otherwise. I hope you can forgive me because I didn't know any better.

Growing up, biologically, is the same for all of us. It follows the same pattern: the cells divide and, in turn, multiply as a result of this division. The cells work together to create tissue, the tissues work together to create organs and the organs work together to create us. When we die, we end up pretty much the same way: in a hole in the ground. If you are fancy and alive two hundred years ago, then you might be able to get a crypt; in the end though, we all die. However, everything before that is what matters to us. As humans, we can be selfish and we want to be accepted. Some people may have the best lives while others, not so much.

A lot of people have things about them that they can’t help about themselves. It is a part of them - ingrained in them and they wouldn't want it any other way; however, some people feel the need to destroy people who are different, who don’t follow the ‘norm’ of society. It starts off with one person noticing or knowing something about the other person. This one person will tell their friends and start to gossip about the person in question. They would throw side-glances at this person, giggle every time he/she walked the corridor, and follow them relentlessly until one of them decides to speak up about the matter that really should not matter to them. Everyone will stare as this group torments him/her and, yet, no one will do anything about it.

As time goes on, so does the torment that he/she will go through. The person will start to feel like an outcast, as no one wants anything to do with the person who is being bullied. No one will stop as they, too, do not want to feel the wrath of those bullying said person. No one will talk to the person in question; they would look away and turn a blind eye to whatever was happening.

One day, you’ll notice that the person being bullied is no longer their usual self. You could sometimes see this person every now and again, before the bullying started, in class or outside of class. You would see all the little quirks about them and how they used to laugh or smile at the littlest of things. That same person is no longer the same person you would see out and about. He/she is withdrawn, walks slowly, looks tired, and probably always wears long sleeves. Needless to say, you didn't know that he/she was depressed, cried himself/herself to sleep at night, was doing poorly in school, and was cutting themselves in their bathroom at night.

But you knew about the bullying.

You didn’t know what it was about, but you knew.

And you didn’t try to stop it.

A few weeks later, you’ll notice that the person being bullied is no longer in school. You think that the person in question may have gone to a different place, moved away from this terrible place.

And then you get the news.

He/she killed him/herself.

Everyone is rounded up and someone has told you the news and what life was like for him/her. You look around to find the people who bullied the person sitting in a corner, looking miserable and distraught. And that was when you heard why the person was being bullied.

‘He/she was part of LGBT community.’

LGBT lives matter - they are the same as anyone else you know. They cannot help who they are; it is who they are. Do not turn your back on someone because you don’t know his or her story. Do not make them feel like an outcast because they have a different sexual orientation to you.

Reverse Racism. What is that my friends? Honestly, I had no idea so I enlisted the help of my best friend in the world, Google, for information. My research has shown that reverse racism or reverse discrimination refers to a phenomenon when the lower class or a minority group start to discriminate against the upper class or majority group making it more difficult for a certain type of person (such as a white man) to get a job, to go to a school, etc., because other people who were treated unfairly in the past are now being given an advantage, as defined by Merriam Webster. For example, a school that is run by African Americans will not let white people enter since they think they are not deserving just because they are white. Another example is when certain employers prefer their own ethnicity to be able to show the "more superior" race that they have their own territory and power.

This honestly makes no sense to me since it contradicts the meaning of racism. The Merriam Webster Dictionary defines RACISM as "poor treatment of or violence against people because of their race" and "a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race". So, technically reverse racism should be no racism at all. In essence, Reverse racism should actually be made to be a belief that maintains that all races are equal regardless of anything. There should be no one thinking they are more or less than others. That's the main problem with society.

We all like to portray victim and bully roles. We like to discriminate and judge. We love to put people down and just give it a fancy name to give it justice. We love to GIVE ourselves and others, the privilege to judge someone based on their looks, skin color, racial background, family history, and economic status. We love to GIVE people certain ranks. When at the end of it all, strip away all of these factors by which we superficially judge people, by which we base the worth of a person, can you still give praise to that person? Can you still say that she or he is worth idolizing? When we are all old, poor, and no longer important to society since all the things they loved about us have faded, will youstill love them? When you look deep into their soul and see them for who they really are, do they still deserve the superiority you have given them? Or sadly, have you based everything on the petty things life offered us to idolize?

We live in a time where our world should be evolving. We should be more giving, loving, and HUMANE. Instead we have become more selfish, vain, petty and cruel. We have been steadily and scarily not progressing but moving backwards. I may have been assigned to write about Reverse Racism but at the end of the day, whatever fancy name you want to call it, at its heart, it's still discrimination. No matter where you come from, why you're where you are at now, what you have done, when you were born, and who you've been, NO ONE has the right to discriminate you, unless of course you know, you've raped, murdered someone or done other heinous crimes. For me, what matters most, is how kind you've been, how generous you've been with love and your time, and how much happiness you have given others.