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I'm hearing from people around the world right now that the path is taking you deep into process. My heart is with you! Fear not, it is necessary. You can't truly access the New Paradigm without regressing into and processing deep seated 'Source Pain' and Karma. This is subconscious conditioning that projects out into your world and has a disharmonious impact on your life. It's unavoidable, this karma brought souls here in order to confront such limitation and evolve through it - the only way out is through! Such spiritual breakthrough comes with enormous sense of well-being, rejuvenation, empowerment and growth. So what might be a truly effective way of processing subconscious, karmic trauma when it activates?...

Openhand 9 Step Healing Process for breaking through Karmic Trauma

Openhand has been working now with evolving people around the world for many years. It's from that collated experience that we've developed this 9 Step Spiritual Healing Process. It's all about helping you regress into your karmic pain, work with it, then breakthrough it into a more expanded state of being.

Confront the situation: you must first accept and completely acknowledge the truth of what is happening in your world. Get thoroughly used to observing yourself and accepting responsibility for your feelings in relation to what is going on in the situation. If you get tight, angry or wound up, acknowledge it. If someone is steamrollering your truth and that feels unpleasant, witness that too. Do not shy away from, or paper over, any inner retraction caused by events and other people in the outside world. By the Law of Attraction you have manifested them anyway, so as to confront and break through such a limitation. Embrace that.

Regress deeply into the feelings of the situation: it may not be appropriate for you to deal with the feelings in the moment they are coming up - you could be at work for example, in public or looking after your children. It is important not to suppress and dissolve the feelings, but rather to contain them: you get the sense that they are inside you, but you are on top of them and can manage them. When the timing is more appropriate (and as soon as possible), regress yourself deeply into the feelings once more: see the images, feel the feelings, let them come up inside.

Honour and express the pain: essentially this source pain is caused where your soul identifies somehow with the illusion of separation and the need for a particular outcome – where the soul is not self-realised (not realising of the One). However, if you honour the pain by fully expressing it in some way, then you become 'as-one' with it – you relocate the lost nugget of soul gold that was buried there and you reintegrate as the One. Honouring the pain might mean shouting and screaming, crying, rolling up into a ball, beating a punch bag or cushion, writing a journal or dancing and moving. Listen to your soul, and do whatever you feel given to do.

Break through with presence: when the source pain is at its height, when you can truly locate and feel it within your body, such that it is becoming excruciating, then paradoxically, you are ready to become the One through it; you are on the very precipice of presence. Remind yourself that all experience is relativistic and therefore transient – it does not define who you are. What you are, is absolute pure potential, beyond the pain. At this point, there will be some key (such as a word, mantra, a visualisation or symbolic metaphor) to help you ‘open the door’ through the density and into presence. If you are not sure what that is, ask the universe and you will be shown.

Feel the light of the soul: when you’ve stepped into the sense of presence, then you are really processing and letting go of the density – it is like you are stirring the bed of the stream in which the nuggets of soul gold have become buried. Now you will be able to see and feel the glint of the soul as it is being liberated. It will be a sense of lightness, completeness, confidence, strength, surrender; you may feel it as a light or warmth beginning to flow into the body, through the previous restriction. Now focus on, and give energy to, this new sensation. It is like pouring fuel on an igniting flame – it grows stronger.

Dissolve the source pain: you are now ready to truly dissolve and fully release that aspect of source pain. Whilst staying in the sense of Pure Presence, intuit how your connection with your emerging soul, can best process the dense energy of the source pain. You have to remain soft and expanded, so that you do not tighten down out of the energy that causes the pain. So stay expanded through it, containing it within your consciousness, but then use whatever meditation comes to you to remove it. It could be a particular form of breathing, movement and dance, or it could be a visualisation. Let your intuition carry you – it already knows what best to do.

Contemplate deeply any conditioned behaviours: the source pain will have built up conditioned behaviours (as spoken of in Gateway 2). Now deeply contemplate what conditioning – what distortions – the source pain has caused in your life. Maybe, for example, you were needy of others? Or perhaps too competitive and aggressive. See yourself within those behaviours, being totally honest with yourself about them (reminding yourself, if necessary, that you are not to blame for them). It can help to write them down in a journal.

Visualise yourself interrupting the behaviours: in motivational and spiritual circles, people often speak of visualising the outcome or behaviour you would like to have happen. The risk is though, that this just becomes another level of programming. Instead, see yourself interrupting the behaviours that have emanated from the source pain. As you get increasingly sensitive, you will begin to actually feel the density and any fixed neural pathways. With a sense of surrendered will, you can begin to break these apart and literally dissolve them within.

Become surrendered openness, attune to authentic beingness: as the density and conditioned behaviours have been dissolved inside, increasingly you settle into an awesome place of surrendered openness: you feel expansive, peaceful, whole and complete. You are now much more able to interrupt the old behaviours in daily life and open up through them. Spontaneous acts of authentic beingness then begin to magically flow through you, which are totally right and befitting of the moment. It is like you become less an identity, and more a moving flow of consciousness through life. This is pure joy of living! (I have written more about the qualities of authentic beingness that start to come through, and to which you can give energy, in Gateway 4).

Breaking through with 5GATEWAYS

These are turbulent times. So don't worry if you find yourself frequently getting into rough processing periods. It is necessary in order to confront the limitations of the old consciousness. Know that you are not alone - people the world over are working through this density. Just seize the courage to confront and soften into your inner density - in which case, that particular phase will be over before you know it. And always remember, each breakthrough process comes with that tremendous sense of recovering a deeper aspect of yourself - becoming ever more of YOU!

About Openhand
Openhand is a unique approach to spiritual evolution: integrating enlightened wisdom of spiritual masters through the ages, it is a way of tapping into the Benevolent Guiding Consciousness of the Universe and aligning with it in your life. It helps you unveil your True Self, remove karmic blockages and unfold your Divine Destiny. It leads to authentic, resilient and truly successful living.
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Comments

I find your 9 step spiritual healing process most useful & insightful, Open, so thanks also from me for the reminder. I've just printed it out on a single sheet of paper & will pin it to my kitchen cupboards where I will see it a lot, & it can act as a reminder when I get lost or confused, as to the way forward on my path of spiritual healing & self-realisation.

Step 1 was to accept & acknowledge my envy, which I did by writing my post on my thread Alex's Experiences.

Step 2 is something I'm very experienced in, as I've done many years of regressive therapy, so that came quite naturally as a result.

With step 3, I felt the pull to honour & express the pain of the envy by doing some of my creative drawing. The source pain then revealed itself as despair. However, when I got in touch with this despair, it felt difficult to stay with that feeling, & I became aware that I was starting to "numb it out", to move into my default of boredom & depression.

Therefore, I couldn't (wouldn't?) allow the source pain to reach it's height, which is what step 4 entails. I'm now left feeling that I'm a failure - I can't do these steps successfully or properly.

Perhaps my despair feels too "big" to dive into, or I don't know how to dive into it, or I'm too scared to dive into it, or there's some kind of other obstacle preventing me from diving into it.

It's easy for you, Open, to say "dive into your source pain" - but just how do I do that when I just can't see (or know) HOW???

I probably need to book another session with my Openhand spiritual coach.

Please don't take this the wrong way, and I know it's not easy, but despite the past advice, you're still missing the basic point: that to distract yourself from the feeling is avoidance and therefore you won't get into the underlying source pain. This is a consistent thing you keep doing - it seems to be some kind of program you've picked up from previous processes elsewhere - it's not your fault, it's a limitation I observe is prevalent in the spiritual mainstream: that of trying to change reality into something more favourable to the ego.

You said...

I felt the pull to honour & express the pain of the envy by doing some of my creative drawing. The source pain then revealed itself as despair. However, when I got in touch with this despair, it felt difficult to stay with that feeling, & I became aware that I was starting to "numb it out", to move into my default of boredom & depression.

"Expressing the Pain" means to be in the pain. In this case envy. To let yourself feel into it.

What I've noticed you do, is that once you start to get anywhere near anything that's truly, deeply embedded, you tend to go into an emotional/psychological reaction which takes you out of the possibility to actually feel into the pain. Previously I've called it "the fizz" that distracts from the deep subconscious.

The deep subconscious source pain, once you get through this fizz, may only begin as a slight vibration - barely recognisable as anything. But this is where you need to be. It feels like boredom is another reaction that prevents full exploration of the moment.

Many thanks for your last response, Open. I initially had an angry reaction to reading it, like I felt you didn't understand or weren't hearing me correctly.

After 3 days of pondering, my anger has now subsided & I can now respond to your post in a more calm & detached way.

During the experience I described in my post above, & in my longer post on the "Alex's Experiences" thread, I mentioned how I'd "felt into" my painful, acute feelings of envy, which seemed like a "surface level" experience, & had then briefly touched the emotion of despair, which seemed to me to be the "source pain".

You wrote:

"The deep subconscious source pain, once you get through this fizz, may only begin as a slight vibration - barely recognisable as anything. But this is where you need to be."

I understand & agree with your suggestions, but my point was that it was difficult enough for me to do what I did on that day - to feel into my envy & briefly touch my source pain of despair - although I think it may even be that the despair isn't yet my true source pain, but a "stepping stone" towards that.

For me, it felt like progress just to get to that far, it's like my "being" won't let me go any faster, much as I'd like that. I seem to have some internal self-regulating mechanism that will only allow me to experience a certain level of pain at a given moment in a given situation, & will then "shut down" the pain by some "distraction" as you call it - numbing out, boredom, depression, anger or rage. This is something I appear to have no control over - I can't force myself to experience more pain (or to "dive into" it as you so often say) - it just doesn't work that way for me.

The analogy that comes to mind is trying to drive a car by depressing the gas pedal when the brake pedal has been strongly applied - however much gas you apply, the car will slow down & stop because the brakes are more powerful than the engine. In my analogy depressing the gas pedal is my attempt to feel into (or dive into) my source pain, & depressing the brake pedal is my unconscious & automatic self-regulating mechanism of shutting down the pain when it becomes intolerable.

Another way of putting it might be that my resistances to "diving into" the pain are still much greater than my willingness (or desire?) to do so.

You might be one of those fortunate people who can just "dive into" their source pain, but I am not. Believe me I've tried, in various ways over the last 20 years or so to do just that, initially through various forms of psychotherapy & more recently through more spiritual approaches, including most recently, the Openhand approach as described in your article above.

My intuition tells me that I will experience a breakthrough with this at some stage (perhaps that will be what you describe as passing through Gateway 1), that I will be able to go fully into my source pain & through that into presence, but for me it's slow progress - one step at a time.

I sometimes wonder, if I'm honest, whether the 5 Gateways sequence will be the one I experience, or whether my spiritual path will take me on another route. I sense that "trying too hard" to follow the 5 Gateways model might be counter-productive for me - seeking a particular outcome, when the Universe might have a different way for my soul to evolve & self-realise. That last part was a bit difficult for me to admit & to share on this forum.

It's been a recurrent theme for me that I've experienced spiritual practitioners & others pushing me (or pressurising me) to go faster in my process than feels right for me. Ultimately, I have to decide for myself how quickly I can go. There may be hidden karmic or other reasons for my apparent slow progress, & I don't mean to say that to excuse myself from anything.

Nevertheless, I'm glad that I'm part of the Openhand Community, & I do appreciate & welcome your comments & suggestions, Open, & those of others on the forums too.

My heart goes out to you. I've felt like a failure many times when I've pulled back, too fearful to go deeper. F___, it's so not easy! And for a good part of my life, I've often felt the need to go faster and better, which was a coping mechanism in my childhood and teenage years to both prove my worth and distract myself from the pain and the sadness of family dysfunction. Which I still do. at times. Thanks to Kim, my wonderful and stalwart coach, for helping me to realize this. Perhaps, deep down, you feel you must go faster and better like I do and then project that others are demanding this of you. I'm aware that I project this conditioned belief outwards whenever I feel that others are cracking the whip! All I see is a part of me. The outer mirror always reveals the state of my inner consciousness. I'm getting better at interrupting the blame game i.e. "You did this to me." How tempting is that ha!

Most of us have had strong and relentless societal conditioning around achieving outcomes and going full force to reach our goals. I experienced this recently while meditating, wanting desperately to stay in the Love/Light space I was feeling and kept losing due to distracted thoughts. And then feeling totally pissed off and frustrated. I go in and out of attachment to outcomes. I accept what Open says. That when we aim for enlightenment, we've already separated ourselves from Source. And, in general, when we try to control the flow, we separate ourselves from the divine flow. What a huge challenge that is. Letting go of control!

When all is said and done, what I truly feel is that we are all doing the best we can and that acceptance of where we're at, without judgment, is the key to letting the pain go. And there are no timelines to get to that space. Sometimes I resist. And sometimes I accept and find the doorway into the Light.

Take heart, my friend. As Open, says, it's not your fault. We're not to blame ourselves for our "shitty" conditioning, but we are responsible for letting it go. You've stepped up to the plate quite admirably. One day, you and I will look around and find that we're at Home Base.

Many thanks Catherine for your post which I found most supportive & helpful. Yes, I agree with you that there is some part of me, that is projecting this idea of having to go faster & better, onto others including Open. It's something that I could well do with letting go of, & perhaps writing about it on this forum, & having it witnessed & "heard" by you & others, is a step towards that. I can be a very hard "task master" towards myself, cracking the whip & expecting/forcing myself to do things that are beyond my capabilities at this moment.

Many thanks Open for your understanding & your wise, supportive comments. Reading your post somehow took some of the pressure off me, & brought me a feeling of relief, contentment, that I'm doing OK. It's opened something up for me, which I can't quite put my finger on right now, but may be able to later.

After reading these 2 posts while I was out doing my voluntary job at the Credit Union, I came home & felt a pull to listen to some music that I find sad & was able to have a bit of a cry, to shed a few tears which I don't ordinarily find easy to do at all. I haven't listened to those particular tracks for a while, & it felt significant to do so, to release something, to let something go...

My gratitude for a truly succint and inspiring piece. It is always such great comfort to be reminded that this journey is not not mine alone and that as humanity we are facing our most rapid and enormous growth and we must be also congniscient of what little Souls we are indeed! Feels like the nerdy class

Open, I would like to iterate on an point that you made in one of your articles. That is to always be fully aware and understand what we asking for when we seek to confront our pain, to ascend, to connect and flow to Source. It has been very dark, and very painful and mostly because once I committed to my soul journey I was shown my mirror fully and naturally my broken bits were infected with this pain I speak of and I didn't even know I had those broken bits to begin with!

So hence I just wanted to say this, if I only knew back then what I was asking for!

I am grateful always. My pain has been and still is my greatest catalyst.

Thanks so much for sharing. It's very inspirational for others to hear how powerful it is to work through and transcend the subconscious density people hold within. You said...

"I would like to iterate on an point that you made in one of your articles. That is to always be fully aware and understand what we asking for when we seek to confront our pain, to ascend, to connect and flow to Source."

Yes that's it - you can't connect to the flow for any length of time if repressed density is dragging you back! So get into it, work with it - process it out - and you'll be flying on the outstretched wings of the soul!

Very timely. ...as I struggle through trying to overcome panic attacks on the tube and in lifts and planes ...any enclosed spaces I feel trapped in and unable to leave. I avoid using the tube and lift to avoid feeling this pain....and get stuck at this point. I fear I will lose myself and freak out and pass out. I need help at this point...any suggestions. One Love. Okpani

These panic attacks arrived after attending a sweat lodge last year September. I have used the tubes and have flown previously without worrying. During one of the rounds I felt trapped a day unable to breathe and clambered out of the lodge collapsing on the grass outside. I could not figure out what had happened as I was so looking forward to this experience as I moved along my path to total freedom and liberation..
Not quite. ..sigh...

I feel your pain Okpani, I felt it all the way across the world it seems and well.. I get it, I understand and if you ever feel like you just need someone to just stand by you.. I am here. I don't know who you are and you don't know who I am.. But what does that ever matter huh?!! You are not alone.

Breathe, all will be well if you allow it to be well. Never be afraid to just say allowed, I have fear. Especially if people are nearby you. That is most definitely a moment in time when you allow others to soothe your soul and in turn you soothe theirs by sharing.

Ive faced head on fear's face in my life and until my last breath I will shout loud and roar to all who ever hear me.. Never fear anything or anyone.

I have learned something so completely extraordinary here in my month of visiting this website. Open talks alot about softening into oneself. At first this concept was very alien to me, but in practicing it and trying to maintain that it has helped part of my journey in staring down the many facets of pain I've stored up along the way. So if it helps, when you have a panic attack etc, just stop - breathe, look at all the facets that cause this anxiety and carry on when you and only you are able to.

Thank you Wynde for your kind words of comfort. This experience is so crippling to the point of none movement. I thought I could manage and face anything and anyone as I regained my Shakti. Sigh...I pause at this point...I do think about getting the tube and focus on internal strength then bottle out and either drive or get the bus making the journey extra longer. I know deep down I have to go through this wall but stop as to painful. As Open says...find the source of the pain and face it head on...but I do not know the source of this pain. I will remember your words as I venture forwards...One Love. Okpani

Your always welcome Okpani! You are working through this even though it may seem as if your not making any progress, even the very thought of doing anything about it is progress!! Never thought I would use this word - Density - but when the Density gets far to thick, have you tried just saying NO! HELL NO..?! If not, I give you permission to use my words hehe Make them up even, because your power can never be taken by anyone but yourself. Now I'm still learning the language of Openhand, so if my words don't seem quite as elegant or eloquent as most are then please forgive my somewhat crude mannerisms lol!
Density to me is thick dark energy that is easily dispelled, yet energy is the most beautiful symphony being played out universally. So with that being said, how about some music that soothes your soul? It is always possible to stop wherever you are and hear music everywhere. Even in a car going by because even that vehicle has its own energetic signature which is just another form music. People even, milling about and running to and fro have their own music, everything is music and you yourself are the most beautiful symphony.. Say that to yourself, scream it even.. I AM MUSIC and nothing can ever stop a melody from going forth. Nothing.
The Tube and Shakti I looked up online because I did not know what those terms were LOL, how awesome!! I learned something new, so thank you for that!!
btw: Im not a counselor or anything, Im just some random Woman running amok on planet earth that refuses to fear anything, even if it stops me in my tracks and I have to trudge, snail crawl through it!

Hi Okpani and Wynde,
What a joy it is to witness your connection. Thank you. Yes, I can feel your fear.
My experience is that there is a subtle balance to be kept between infusing soul - there is so much that is not caught in the eddy current of fear - and confronting the fear head on.
So balancing music or walks in nature or dance or touch or wonderful food or whatever makes your heart sing with regressing back to the feeling you get in the tube. Maybe you don't have to go on the tube right now. The feeling is within you. Find a place you feel safe and then evoke the feeling you get on the tube and keep breathing. Keep softening. Get interested in how it feels - what tightens and keep breathing. Keep watching and feeling. It is just an experience, just energy, not you. Breath by breath. Take it slowly maybe. Little by little a day at a time. You will get there- it's a nine step process but it doesn't all have to happen in one bang. Just take the next step. You don't need to know the source of the pain or where you will end up right now you just need to be here and now - your experience in each moment is the key. The meditations on this website could be a great support. Go gently and slowly we are with you. You are not alone.

As i read on I am enveloped in a wave of love that brings tears to my eyes. Just thinking of going on the tube makes my hands sweat and breathing speeds up. Yes there is a feeling of density and it feels very heavy. Using distraction is a great tool and thought of creating a tapestry while sitting on the tube. Going to print off the 9 steps and work through each one moving past 4 and 5. One Love Okpani

Opkani, use the distraction while working through your fear most definitely! I say anything that calms you and brings inner peace is well worth the effort.
The steps here are absolutely brilliant, just another reason for me to be thankful for finding this site. Think I'll write them down myself too and hand them out to my family/people that are going through life's moments/karmic trauma.

I was thinking last night about this and how poetic/synchronistic for me this is it too. Just Friday night I went to a family gathering and I was telling them that I was "quitting/going on vacation" from being the protector/guardian of them. That I'm getting to old for this sh.. Then my nephew was relaying all kinds of stories and others were chiming in etc.

So ok then! Okpani just always know you are never alone, everyone has moments of sweaty palms and internal convulsions. But this is your story, your life, your moment in time. Let your spirit shine and just know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you will get through this no matter what... Even if it takes an hour, week or whatever time you allow it.

I feel you there. I myself had a past life experience of being kept in a box, and now I have a very big body which doesn't quite fit anywhere, so this is how I'm dealing with this Karma. It sounds really like some Karma has been triggered for you too Okpani.

I believe that most fear can be traced back to a fear of death - that is, the fear of the unknown, the fear of obliteration, the fear (as you said in your first post) of losing yourself.

To me, giving myself practice feeling these things can be hugely beneficial. One of my favourite ways to do this is to go out for a walk and find a place relatively free of danger, and then close my eyes and walk like this. It is a real test of stepping into the unknown and I don't last long, but it's a great opportunity to bring up this fear in a safe environment and work with it, knowing you can open your eyes at any moment.

The same could be applied to you - take yourself into a mock scenario where you feel trapped, unable to move, and work through the 9-step process. There are many ways to induce fear, particularly if it close to the surface as in your case.

Then I would ask myself - who am i in this scenario (e.g. being on the tube)? Which is the part of me that cannot be touched, that cannot be confined, that cannot be suppressed? Then I would get to know this part of me and try to be that in these scary scenarios.

Hope that helps. I'm actually in the middle of writing a series of articles on 'Overcoming fear by embracing death' if anyone's interested. The series has 2 parts so far and theres likely to be at least one more part on the way.

Hi All. I do believe it is a past life memory has been triggered by the sweat lodge experience. I really do appreciate all the support and suggestions. To start the process I will also attending a NLP session then an indepth astrology reading to access this experience. I visualise a plant breaking the surface of earths crust as it grows in the direction of the SUN...I am that close!!! I will read the articles Richard. One Love Okpani

Heyas Richard!! Those articles you wrote on fear are awesome! It is about death, which within itself is just an ending to something or another. How your dealing with your box though is brilliant. I like your web of identity too, the many facets of oneself gives a particular pin pointed view on who, how and why a person is the way they are. In turn just knowing you are that, but allowing yourself to be so much more and not confined to a pin point is freeing in and of itself.

From Richards article....Check out these two articles by Olivia Goldhill. They show us how the Buddhist perspective of ever-changing self can be linked to Neuroscientific research and that our personalities change over the course of our lives. What is interesting about this second study is that most of the research out there suggests that personality is fairly stable. However, they have all been conducted up to middle age, and this study went all the way from ages 14-77. It suggest that the bigger changes in personality begin to happen after middle age. Of course this is the period in our lives when we will have to say goodbye to many of the people, objects and situations that we have identified with. It shows how losing these things can affect who we are. We may become different people as the things that we hold dear get ripped away from us.

Also did you notice this article by Open, what jumps out at me regarding this fear were talking about here is how he describes it perfectly.
-What I've noticed is, that the more you commit to the exploration and revelation of self, the shorter the constricting bottlenecks last, and the more you expand with the flow coursing through you. It literally feels like a path of light is opening up before you- http://www.openhandweb.org/comment/25392#comment-25392
Brilliant!!!

Open talks about processing karma that arises in a given ordinary situation. But can I intentionally sit down and process karma from past memories that I associate with my current limiting behaviours? If so, I have these questions:

1) When I know it's enough? I tried to follow these steps yesterday when intentionally confronting a memory from my childhood and I felt good and somewhat relieved. But how can I tell if this karma was fully processed? You know, I'm still on the beginning of my journey, so I don't have enough sensitivity to dig deep in my feelings (actually, I struggled a bit to shut up my mind chatting). Should I repeat the regression to this memory to reinforce the release?

2) Is it recommended to do this intentional cleaning as a daily routine? Yeah, I know that as I walk the Path my 'crap' gradually gets cleaned... but since I don't have many hours at my disposal to meditate, doing this may speed up the process, right? (of releasing karma)

The Openhand approach to Karma is to let it happen, let it arise by itself. Because it can't be pre-empted. It's actually supposed to catch you in a blind spot! Otherwise it tends not to feel real when you process it.

However, what we can do is turn up the volume on soul integration so karma activates by itself. Meditation is of course a great way to do this - so infusing soul, but without preconceived intention about where it will lead.

What's going to happen then, is internal blockages will be activated as you follow the path. And these will project into your life circumstances - relationships, career, general living circumstances. A problem will kick off which causes tightness inside - that's when to apply this 9step healing process.

How do you know when it's complete?

In short, you will simply know!

What is likely to happen, is that you'll hit plateaus where everything feels okay. I'd suggest not trying to intentionally dig to find more at this point. Accept the rest, rejuvenation and relaxation. But then go back to the soul infusion meditation until more karma kicks off by itself.

Such a fascinating thread this is ! I have a question . There is someone at work I believe I have a deep karmic relationship with . His energy is quite dense but I feel the undeniable pull in my heart chakra that I have come to recognise as the calling card of karmic relationships . I once had a dream in which I was an oracle in Greece and he was the son of the Queen . I believe she too is incarnated as my boss at work( she is very maternal towards this man too) . With work I am able to actually feel into the energy body between us . It is dark and dense energy and this person is extremely shut down . This is a very challenging interaction as I seem to either shut down (so as not to feel the intensity ) or get disturbed with various chakra sensations activated . We are both married and so he is not available to me to work karma with in a third dimensional sense .
Since the only way out seems to be through ,I have really had to up my game . Thanks to the weird sidetrack my life has taken ,I am editing a lot more and have been spurred to do a lot of soul searching . Disengagement still eludes me though . Any insights are most welcome .

"With work I am able to actually feel into the energy body between us. It is dark and dense energy and this person is extremely shut down . This is a very challenging interaction as I seem to either shut down (so as not to feel the intensity ) or get disturbed with various chakra sensations activated . We are both married and so he is not available to me to work karma with in a third dimensional sense."

This happens a great deal. Because of some mutual karma, the law of attraction draws you together. But frequently, the other person might not be ready to process and release. It doesn't have to stop you doing that though, even if the other isn't aware.

Let the proximity activate the feeling - then work into the feeling. Work to reclaim your soul sovereignty from the energy body that was formed between you.

You may find some situation arises where you're called to visibly reclaim your power, in how the relationship functions now. Yet without the other even realising it, you still reclaim your karmic power.

Hi Megha. I had the same experience where I felt I was physically flat lining into a life of acceptance as i felt i could not change my life circumstances. However, there was a bigger plan forming. My first love stepped in and gave me an electric shock to the point sparks were coming out of my head!!!! kundilini rising!!!! i did not care that I was in a relationship of 23 years...this experience felt right and we remained blissfully in a bubble of pure love for 3 months. However, I also checked into my shadow side back to my childhood - by inner child needed attention. I was repeating the same pattern from my teens as the damaged soul. However, the bubble burst when he felt not a good idea to continue the relationship as someone would get hurt. I persisted and persisted to the point my heart broke in two as I felt we were compatible on all levels. And the learning developed into self love and self worth. not behaving in a way that people expect me to be in order to meet their needs. The mould had been broken as I slowly reclaimed parts of myself from past and current relationships. Very painful learning experience and at the same time very powerful!!! I am no longer the same person. I have evolved and continue to do so.... we remain divinely connected.

Hi Alex. I have attended OPEN HAND retreat. SINCE 2015 WHAT HAS CHANGED?

.......I sometimes wonder, if I'm honest, whether the 5 Gateways sequence will be the one I experience, or whether my spiritual path will take me on another route. I sense that "trying too hard" to follow the 5 Gateways model might be counter-productive for me - seeking a particular outcome, when the Universe might have a different way for my soul to evolve & self-realise. That last part was a bit difficult for me to admit & to share on this forum.....

......There may be hidden karmic or other reasons for my apparent slow progress, & I don't mean to say that to excuse myself from anything.....

TRIGGERS can take YOU to the source of your pain and help you understand where they come from.

why did it take you 3 days to calm down? what are YOU REALLY angry about?

but for me it's slow progress - one step at a time - baby steps.

because you use the example of a car - did anything happen to you involving a car?

internal self-regulating mechanism that will only allow me to experience a certain level of pain at a given moment in a given situation.

THE PATTERNS PRESENTED WILL REPEAT THEMSELVES IN ADULTHOOD AND HINDER GROWTH INTO MATURITY...JUST OPENED THE BOOK ON CHAPTER 5...HOW EARLY EXPERIENCES CAN ALTER BRAIN CHEMISTRY, LEADING TO ADULT DEPRESSION.

YOU WILL NEED TO DIG DEEP ON THIS ONE, AS YOU MAY HAVE BURIED THE MEMORY IN ORDER TO FUNCTION IN THE WORLD.

ONE LOVE.

NB - NOW ITS NO COINCIDENCE THAT THE BOOK OPENED ON CHAPTER 5 !!!! IS IT??

ANY CHANGES SINCE 2015?? WOULD BE INTERESTING TO KNOW HOW THE SHIFT HAS AFFECTED YOU...

5GATEWAYS is not actually a prescriptive route or a path. It's more a framework for inquiry.

Consider the direction is to climb a mountain - like pass into the Fifth Density for example.

There will be many different pathways to the 'top'. However we'll all pass through particular altitudes on the way to the summit.

5GATEWAYS is more about saying: when people have climbed the 5D mountain before, like Jesus and the Buddha for example, they describe things at particular 'altitudes' that others also climbing might relate to.

For example, I know people that have walked a Buddhist path, or a shamanic path, or worked a great deal with Vipassana and yoga, who've all passed through Transfiguration (full kundalini activation at the culmination of Gateway 3) and described it in similar ways.

Each Gateway is the passage through a particular density. So what it's really saying, is that if you recognise your soul's yearning is to ascend into the 5D, then here are the kinds of experiences you'll likely have as you pass through each density. It says nothing about the route you may personally take through them.

If in engaging with the 5GATEWAYS framework you end up efforting for an outcome, then in this regard, it's an excellent mirror - it reflects that this might be something you do and need to let go of.

On what ever path your consider yourself on, I would say it's absolutely fundamental to own your own reactions to it, to take sovereignty of the experiences YOU manifest. Then you will never fail, because this tightness, provides the very route along which to travel. This tightness IS what stands in the way of progression. And so we're blessed, when whatever method we're applying, reveals it.

Coming from a Buddhist oriented background and having practised and academically studied Vipassana oriented approaches I found that the 5 Gateways offer an experiential and accessible form of inner-outer inquiry that can also be found (perhaps and sometimes verbalised slightly differently) in other 'spiritual' traditions.

For example, the kundalini phenomenon. I couldn't find anything relevant in the Theravada tradition - as yet - I am speaking with a senior teacher soon about it but found a lot in Tibetan tradition. There, they call it 'Tummo'. Very interesting. Along similar lines, I have found parallels for other Gateways in the Zen tradition.

It's very helpful and re-assuring to know that there is a guided inquiry in the 5 Gateways that is - this is important - accessible and clear for all people to take in. Often, this is not the case in more complex and loaded with cultural baggage traditions and approaches.

Of course, I am still working my way through it all and I find it very exciting!