Monthly Archives: December 2013

There is, a bankruptcy of morality, happenin’ in this world here, and, there’s NO way, of changing it…

A bankruptcy of morality, and, there’s NO way of avoiding, going UNDER, and once you’d sunk, well, there ain’t NO way you’ll EVER get your credibility back again, as you’d become known, for being a total L-I-A-R.

A bankruptcy of morality, you can’t avoid it, and I’d already seen ENOUGH of it, from where I’m currently sitting (as to where that may be? It’s still NONE of YO beeswax!!!). A bankruptcy of morality, there’s NO way you’ll EVER get back up again, after all, the law of ONCE & ALWAYS still applies here, doesn’t it? Sure does!!!

A bankruptcy of morality, how, you ask, CAN I avoid it? Well, you’re just going to have to be REAL careful, as if you’re living ON eggshells, watch your steps, because one WRONG step in this HUGE landmine, well, you GET the picture, don’t you now???

A VERY important lesson, for the younger children out there, translated…

A few days ago, my child who’d only started to stumble climbed up the stairs, but, he’d just gotten through the first three steps, and was already calling me.

I looked over at him, keep turning his head backwards, guessing that he’s afraid of the heights, but didn’t know how he could get back down again, and so, I’d thought of going over, and carrying him up, but, the elders in my neighborhood started telling me that it wasn’t the right thing to do, “Children need to learn to stand up on their own, let him climb back down on his own.” “Allow him to know what fear is, so, he can have the experience to carry him through his life, to NOT do something that he couldn’t handle.”

Everybody seemed to know what s/he was talking about, but, I couldn’t bear, to stand hear him cry, I’d still walked over to my son, asked him gently, what, was the matter? Without knowing, that he saw how I was standing behind him, didn’t ask me to carry him, instead, it’s like he’d gained the courage, climbed toward the second floor on his own. As he’d reached the second floor, he’d gladly hugged me, and jumped up and down, as if the two of us had conquered the top one hundred tallest of mountains in Taiwan.

The results gave me a deep understanding, that a LOT of the seemingly right ways of education, may not actually, be fitting to the children, if I’d not showed my hands to my child when he’d needed me to, and allowed him to holler and scream out of fear, then, maybe, he would NEVER have the courage, to go anywhere NEAR that staircase again. Maybe, a lot of parents believe, that this, would make the child behave, but actually, this way of teaching would force the children to lose their sense of adventure, and the children’s trust in the parents would NO longer be there either!And so, the mother took the words of the elders, to let go, and, being a first time mother, it would be hard, to watch a child who’d only begun to stumble, actually fall, but, it’s a part of letting go, something we all have to do, and this mother had successfully helped her son establish his own self-confidence, giving him the courage.

Because he’s had a smooth way, and after he’s out of school, he found the world, to be too cold, too hard, and TOO cruel, and he just couldn’t handle it, and yes, it’s still a C-A-S-E, of a Strawberry, from the Front Page Sections, translated…

A master’s degree holder, Dai, yesterday, was found, to have hung himself at his own home by his father, and, after being rushed to the E.R., he’d still D-I-E-D. The police investigations found, that it’s only been half a month since Dai was relieved of his army duties, because his girlfriend broke up with him when he was away, serving in the army, and that he was having difficulties, finding a job, that, was what led him to commit suicide; and, a female student from Taidong University was suspected of not handling the academic pressures well enough, was found, dead, hanging at the dormitory, and she couldn’t be saved either.

The police found, that Dai who’s twenty-five years old, had outstanding grades, went to ALL the best of schools in high school, and graduated from N.T.U., and had gotten in to the master’s program at his alma mater, along with two other schools, is a good student in his parents’ minds.

During the time when Dai was working on his graduate degree, he’d entered into the creativity competition with a group of his classmates, gotten a place, and in his spare time, he’d played in a band too, as a drummer, is a multitalented guy.

The police said, that from Dai’s Facebook pages, there was a female friend who had close contact with him before he enlisted, but, not afterwards, they’re suspecting, that she was his girlfriend.

The police found, that last year, as Dai was working on his graduate papers, he’d met a bottleneck, and couldn’t continue, wrote a final note, stating that he’d wanted to suicide, but gladly, he was saved, that time, by his father.

And, there was another female student, Yeh, who was found, dead, by her own dormitory bed, this, was the second case of suicide in the recent months in the University of Taidong.

And so, we still have two examples of “strawberries”, because they’d had it easy, all the way UP (to wherever they were from before, how the HELL should I know???), and now, there’s this small fork in the road (like couldn’t think of a good topic to do the research on, or breaking up with a long time girl/boyfriend???), they couldn’t handle it, so, they CHOSE to take their own lives, which was very irresponsible, because they FAILED to consider how their loved ones, the ones who cared about them (like friends???) would be the ones, carrying on, with the memories of how they’d KILLED themselves!!!

A family of six, crowded into a small, thirty-square feet space, the mother took the graveyard shifts for work, the sixth grade girl took on the role of the mother, took care of ALL the household chores.

In the dimmed lights, in the Dong’s living room, other than a table, a refrigerator, a rice cooker, there was nothing else; the eleven year old eldest sister, “Ducky”, took her four younger siblings, crowded around the ONLY small table they owned, doing their homework assignments.

This “scene” had played over and over through the years, in the Dong’s household, the surrogate mom, the eldest sister, “Ducky”, has just ONE wish, that she will be like a protective hen, watching over and taking good care of her four younger siblings; and this wish, she’d kept hidden, inside the cartoons of “Hen with Ducklings” she’d drawn.

Why Hen with Duckling? She said, “because mom works very hard, like how a hen is trying to feed the chicks, pecking, nonstop”, and “the younger kids don’t know any better, are acting like ducklings, quack, quack, quacking, all day long.”
The way too mature words had shocked the kindergarten teacher, Huang, who was in contact with “Ducky” surprised, what sort of family background would make this small body, filled with such mature thoughts?

The mother of “Ducky” was only thirty-nine years old, and yet, she’d already gone through THREE bad marriages, the five kids at home has a total of three different last names. The family of six relied solely off of her measly paycheck of $20,000N.T per month, along with the checks for underprivileged given out by the government. The family of six are cramped in a thirty-square feet compound, they’re having it hard from day to day.

As the reporters visited the Dong’s house, they’d found that there are so many cracks on the walls, there was NOTHING more than a couch, a tea stand, and a refrigerator that was donated by someone kind, there’s NOTHING else.

“It pays more if I took the graveyard shifts”, Ducky’s mother told, she would take the graveyard every single night, wanting to make a little more, so the family could survive, it’s just that this had become too hard on her eldest child, “I’d feel heartache for her, every night I’d gone to sleep, I’d start to cry.”

“Ducky” and her family originally lived in Pingdong, but, they couldn’t withstand how the neighbors would call them bad names, so they’d moved away, and, maybe it’s because of this experience, that’s made “Ducky” even more mature, and even more silent.

Last year on September 21, there was a fire, and one disaster came after another, “Ducky’s” mother had once thought about ending it all for herself and the children, but when she’d thought of how children are the innocents, she’d let go of her thoughts for suicide.

“Ducky”, who knew a lot at such a young age, would wake up at six thirty in the morn, when the mother was still at work, she’d dropped her youngest siblings off to the kindergarten, then, took her younger siblings to school with her; after school, she would bathe her youngest brother, then feed him.

Last week, someone kind donated a refrigerator to the family, and “Ducky” was ecstatic, “With this refrigerator, I will be able to take my free lunch from school home, to give it to my siblings.”

After the meals, she’d started working on her homework with her younger siblings; the five children crammed into a small table, which is NOT even close, to a good place to study, but “Ducky” had always kept her grades up, she’d maintained the top five places in her classes, the home is filled with certificates of achievements from school; but, she’d never talked about her home life at school, “I do my best, to protect my younger siblings, from getting bullied and picked on.”

“I wanted to work, to make money for my own graduation trip”, Ducky said, that she’d regularly see how her classmates would get to go shopping, to eat out, and she’d be envious, more or less. She’d never gone on trips, and had hoped that she could go on this graduation trip with the rest of the class, to put a perfect ending to her own elementary years.

So, this, is the story of a big sister, being a MOTHER, to her younger siblings, because she’s from a single-parent household, and the mother has to work, to keep them all, and because she’s the eldest, the weight of her household landed on her, and yet, she still held tightly, to that positive outlook on life.

Keeping you in a medically-induced coma, because there’s NO treatment for what you have yet, and so, by keeping you in a medically-induced coma, we, the doctors, the teams of experts, your families, hope to find a cure for your condition, and, the next time you wake up, you WILL be, a BRAND new person.

Keeping you in a medically-induced coma, because we need to prevent more brain cells from getting killed, as you’d lost oxygen in that bad crash, and, because your families and friends are NOT ready to let go of you yet, so, you must be MADE, to SUFFER the consequences of them, NOT willing to, NOT wanting to, let you just D-I-E.

Keeping you in a medically-induced coma, because you’re so very young, and I KNOW, that a treatment (or rather, a C-U-R-E!!!) will be found, if we let go, then, you will D-I-E, and that, is simply not something any of us, your loved ones (friends AND families) are willing to deal with yet. So, we are, keeping you in a medically-induced coma, with absolutely NO sense of how this would be unfair to you, and, by the time you DO wake up again, you will find yourself, like Rip Van Winkle, in an unknown world, quite different from the one you fell asleep in before………

Another year had come to pass, and, look, at how FAR you’d come, NOT very far still, for you are still that little boy who was ABUSED and NEGLECTED, and I, already a WOMAN, risen ABOVE from my own circumstances, look how far apart we are (note: it’s a HELL of a LOT MORE than once every year, like in your contractions when giving birth???).

Another year had come to pass, and I look back now, realized, that I’m still NOWHERE I wanted to be, I’d drifted too far, from the man I’m supposed to be, the man I WANTED to be, for you guys, and, you’d all grown up, overnight too, it seemed. So, here I am, approaching old age, lonely, and alone, walking down this long AND winding path, you’d think, that I’d be done, traveling the LONG and WINDING road already, but I’m not!!!

Another year had come to pass, and, ALL the miseries from when I was a child (yeah, I was once, one of THOSE too, and yeah, I would want to wear them skirt ALL the time, NO matter the weather, but gladly, I’d already grown OUT of that “phase” already!!!), are still NOT forgotten, but because I’d dealt with all of it, they now, no longer, have that death-tight GRIP over my N-E-C-K.

Another year had come to pass, had you, or you, or even, Y-O-U (yeah, I’m talkin’ to Y-O-U!!!) come very far? Are you the MAN or WOMAN you want to be? If so, great, if not, well, SUCKS to be Y-O-U!!!

The light slowly, faded, from your eyes, as you struggled, real hard, to hold on, tightly, to that DYING breath of yours, but, in the end, you’d still, EXHALED!!!

The light slowly, faded, from your eyes, as it should, because after ALL the EVILS you’d done, you DESERVED a HARD as HELL kind of death, there’s NO doubt in my mind ‘bout it. The light slowly, faded, from your eyes, and there was NOTHING I could to, to MAKE you hold on, you’d been long gone before today, but, because I didn’t want you to “leave”, I’d REFUSED to pull the plug, hoping, and praying (yeah right!!!) that you’d finally regain consciousness, and tell me you love me once more.

The light slowly, faded, from your eyes, and, all the world becomes darkened, and, afterwards, I’d expected the tears to overflow from my eyes, but, my eyes, for some UNKNOWN reasons, had become too D-R-Y.

The light slowly, faded, from your eyes, and, there’s still NOT a doubt in my mind, that you got EXACTLY what you deserved, I’m just sorry, that I wasn’t there, to BEAR witness, to the UNHOLY (b/c that, was what it was!!!) EVENT, of you, sucking down your very last breath, holding tightly on to it, refusing to let go………