10 Mag’s Met Gala 2017 Round-Up

Last night, fashion’s good, bad and um… “WOW” ascended the steps of the Metropolitan Museum for the inaugural Met Gala, celebrating the opening of “Rei Kawakubo/Comme des Garçons: Art of the In-Between” at the Costume Institute. Which meant a theme which best described as “avant garde” and interpreted in a way best described as “loose”. But, who are we to complain about an onslaught of full-frontal eleganza post 3-day weekend?

We will begin with Rihanna, because where better to start than her, particularly since she dished up the theme by, quite simply, wearing Comme. And when we say “quite simply” we don’t actually mean that at all, because this was actually all-out Fall 2016 layered Comme fantasy. Guttural noises of appreciation from Ten Towers this AM.

Naomi Campbell in Azzedine Alaia. Are there five more reassuring words in the English language than that? And what better accessory for an Alaia dress than a brand new British Vogue Editor-in-Chief? Namely – the lovely Edward Enniful. He also demonstrated a keen eye for accessorising, following our motto of: “if you’ve got it, flaunt it” – the “it”, in this case being his OBE, worn on the lapel of his Burberry tux.

And, talking of power pairings, we are somewhat deprived of words to describe Rick Owens and former 10 cover star Michele Lamy. She wore Comme for the occasion which, again, we have a lack of words for – well, apart from a certain member of Team Ten who noted its likeness to “lady parts”. Don’t think Michelle would be offended by the comparison – lady parts giveth life, and so does she.

Stella Tennant and Anna Cleveland also chose Comme for the occasion. Let’s not embarrass ourselves by going into the particularities of the get-ups, and rather quote Phoebe, who described the pair as “statuesque wonders, walking works of art”. Also in Comme was Tracee Ellis Ross who gave us sage otherworldly goddess. Mostly because she is a sage otherworldly goddess, and we’re duly obsessed.

Joel is making me put in Celine Dion because he is Canadian or something and this is apparently making him very proud. She wore Atelier Versace, which here came in the form of a body-suit with a strapped on bodice and skirt. Perhaps, like we choose our outfits, Ms Dion selected this number for the ease of which it can be removed at the end of the evening. Note also the headpiece (hair?), which is best described as “sugarwork in an expensive restaurant.”

Next is Sarah Paulson, who wore Prada, which thus combined two of my very favourite things. Add a sprinkling of marabou and I almost needed a little lie down. The lovely Julianne Moore also channelled “peacock”, choosing Calvin Klein By Appointment for her own feather fantasy moment.

Courtney Love wore her Marc Jacobs gown with her daughter upon her arm and some lipstick on her chin. Which may or may not have been intentional, but if anyone can work a make-up error, it is she. And, talking of celeb daughters, Lily Rose-Depp gave us a sweet serving of candy pink Chanel. Isn’t she grown up? Candice Swanapoel followed her down the sweet and womanly route, proving that custom black Topshop can be such if it demonstrates one’s teeny-tiny waist and ample bosom.

Honourable mentions go to Madonna in Moschino, who demonstrated what,exactly, a ballgown in camo accessorised with a matching net camouflage blanket looked like – namely, quite fabulous. Kim Kardashian did simple white beauty in Vivienne Westwood, whilst Katy Perry channelled Sam SATC post-chemical peel with a Maison Margiela red veiled number. Not that she had any sort of facial disfigurement. That we noticed. Not sure how she ate her dinner in that, but who needs food when you have fashion?