Actually, I reckon the "other door" and "staff teeth" notices are guerrilla spoofs by staff driven spare by (a)micro-management intended to remove all initiative in the pursuit of standardised service levels; and (b) anti- "no-win-no-fee" legal action over-defensiveness.I remember once seeing on a noticeboard the mission statement "To provide reliable public transport for travellers by delivering the consistent operation of key components through quality engineering", thinking that made sense until someone said sotto voce "the wheels on the bus go round and round."