Season

A Very Crappy Christmas

Dec 20, 2000
It's Christmastime in South Park, the best time of the year! The snow is on the ground, the halls are decked, and Mr. Hankey always shows up for the festivities! Kyle and Ike are anxiously awaiting his arrival from the toilet bowl, but Kyle knows something is up when Mr. Hankey never shows!
He calls the other guys together in an emergency meeting in the AM. They climb through the sewer system to reach Mr. Hankey, and find him along with his family! The boys are taken aback that Mr. Hankey even has a family, and the boys agree to help spread the Christmas cheer, but nobody seems to be in the Christmas consumer spirit!
The boys decide to make a Christmas cartoon in reference to Matt and Trey's animated Christmas card that started South Park in the first place. The cartoon is a holiday hit, and brings the Christmas spirit back into the town! ...until the film is destroyed midway through. Hankey's kids fix the projector, and all is well!

Episode 416

The Wacky Molestation Adventure

Dec 13, 2000
When Cartman gets excellent seats to see the brand new shock rock band, the Raging Pussies, he invites all three of the other boys along for the ride! But when Kyle's parents say that he has to free Cuba from communism before he can go, Kyle sets out to do just that, and succeeds! His parents are bewildered that their son is capable of such things, but still deny him the right to go.
Kyle's enraged by his parents and their decisions, so Cartman recommends calling the police and telling them that his parents "molestered" him. Kyle does exactly that, and his parents are taken to prison, where they are brainwashed into believing that they molested their children. All of the kids follow suit, until no adults are left...
Two travelers are looking to get to the next town over when they stop in South Park, which is now Smiley Town. Cartman is the Mayor, and the kids rule the town in two separate divisions. But when the out-of-towner talks some sense into them, they realize the folly of their ways and tell the police their parents are innocent.

Episode 415

Fat Camp

Dec 6, 2000
The children are going through a tough biology class with Ms. Choksondik, as they have to dissect a sacred manatee. Stan can't do it due to his weak stomach, but Kyle dares Kenny to eat the creature's spleen for a total of $41. He does, and a trend starts as he starts doing all sorts of crazy stuff for cash, becoming a popular extreme gross-out celebrity.
While Cartman is watching television, his mother sets up an intervention for him to lose weight at a fat camp, along with the help of Mr. Mackey and Garrison. While the real Eric Cartman is stuck at fat camp, he hires a thin look-a-like to pose as him from the drug rehab clinic, and the kid brings back sweets for the rest of the fat camp... which Cartman sells to the other fat kids for loads of money.
While "Krazy" Kenny becomes a huge celebrity on the likes of Howard Stern and other shocking forms of media and climbs into Ms. Crabtree's vagina, the fat kids just aren't losing weight, and Cartman gets busted for being a cheater when the other kids tattle on him.

Episode 414

Pip

Nov 29, 2000
Malcolm McDowell presents the South Park version of the Dickens classic, Great Expectations. It stars Pip Pirrup, as he visits his mother and father... at their grave sites. On the way back, he comes across an escaped convict that's in dire need of assistance in getting free of his shackles. He goes home to his abusive household only to find out that Miss Havesham wants to see him!
He is called up to the Havesham Estate to have a meeting with Miss Havesham and Estella, the young girl of the estate. Pip slowly falls in love with Estella, even though she treats him like dirt, while Miss Havesham's plan of completely destroying Pip's heart. She sends Pip off to become a gentleman through precise training.
When Pip returns from the school, he is a gentleman, indeed! But after Estella destroys his heart, just as Miss Havesham wanted. Pip shows that revenge is a dish best served cold as he and his friends that he's made along these months to fight Miss Havesham and her evil band of monkeys! ...Huh? Monkeys?

Episode 413

Helen Keller! The Musical

Nov 22, 2000
The boys are about to throw their fourth grade Thanksgiving Day play! But when Butters comes in looking pretty stressed out from the news he's seen with his own eyes, the boys get worried. Word on the street is that the kindergarteners are going to put on the best play in the history of school plays, and the boys aren't about to be outshined by a bunch of little kids!
Cartman is directing the play, and he's a demanding boss in seeking the best of all of his actors. Timmy is playing Helen Keller, but they're in need of sprucing things up, so they need to grab a turkey to make the play more festive. Timmy picks out Gobbles, a mentally challenged turkey with a bent neck. When Cartman finds out, he brings in a real Broadway turkey actress to do the job instead.
Cartman plots to kill Gobbles, but the trainer decides to toy with Timmy's head instead. When Timmy lets Gobbles go, Gobbles is picked up by a turkey murdering group. Due to his bent neck, he gets away unharmed and returns to Timmy. Timmy hires Jimbo and his hunters to murder the actress turkey, and Gobbles gets his day in the sun!

Episode 412

Trapper Keeper

Nov 15, 2000
Kyle just got a brand new Dawson's Creek trapper keeper, and boy is he proud of it! After all, it's the hottest new show around, but when Cartman shows up with the Trapper Keeper 5000, Kyle's new trapper keeper instantly becomes a crapper keeper by comparison. Cartman's trapper keeper can even grab objects and merge with them!
A new adult arrives in South Park, on the boys' school bus, no less. He claims his name is Bill Cosby, and he'd like to be their friend. When he runs away with Eric's trapper keeper, it is soon revealed that he was sent from the future to destroy the trapper keeper, as it will take over the world!
Garrison is teaching kindergarten class, and a battle for class president is waging between Filmore and Ike. When the votes are tied, Filmore's aunt Rosie O'Donnell shows up to belittle Herbert. When she storms off, Cartman's trapper keeper eats her, and it poisons the evil trapper keeper into death! The day is saved!

Episode 411

Fourth Grade

Nov 8, 2000
The boys are moving up in the educational world from the third grade to the fourth grade, where they must deal with a brand new threat to their playtime and freedom in class: Ms. Choksondik. This evil witch is the exact opposite of Mr. Garrison, who never really taught much of anything, and has gone missing after his novel became a best gay seller.
The boys absolutely despise having Diane Choksondik for a teacher, often making fun of her name ("Ms. Makes-Me-Sick") and trying to find a way to go back in time to the third grade, which they're convinced was better than the fourth. They get some help from two Star Trek nerds to make a time machine out of Timmy's wheelchair, but the plan backfires and sends only Timmy back in time.
Meanwhile, Diane is tired of not being able to communicate with the children, so she goes to find Mr. Garrison up in the mountains, where he's been in hiding. While teaching her how to deal with the kids, he finds out that he is a homosexual and comes out with it once and for all. The kids like their new teacher once she starts acting like Herbert.

Episode 410

Probably

Jul 26, 2000
After finding Father Maxi having sex with a woman in church, the boys vowed to create their own sanction of the Catholic religion under the guidance of Eric Cartman, who becomes a rampant evangelist that's bent on repenting the souls of those that are damned. When Kenny is rescued from under the bus in a poor Spanish speaking country, he calls Eric and tells him he's in Hell. This only fuels Cartman and his beliefs.
Meanwhile in Hell, Satan went through with going to Saddam's motel room to discuss his feelings about the whole ordeal, but wound up sleeping with him. When he goes home to break the news to his sensitive partner Chris, Saddam shows up to kill Chris so that him and Satan can be together.
It is revealed that Cartman has been studying the best of the best and is knowingly robbing people of their money through religion, until Jesus steps in to intervine. Lastly, Satan realizes that he doesn't want Saddam or Chris, through the guidance of God, and kicks them both to the curb.

Jul 19, 2000
While the boys are attending a church meeting, Cartman goes off on a funny psalm reading that enrages Priest Maxi. Maxi responds to the boys and their immature portrayal in God's house by threatening everyone inside of the church with God's eternal hellfire. This worries the boys, who decide to take this religion thing more seriously.
Meanwhile in Hell, Satan is celebrating his moving in with his new boyfriend, Chris. But as they're unpacking, an old flame knocks on Satan's door in Saddam Hussein, who wants to take the world over with Saddam once again. Satan kicks him out, but just can't shake the feeling of love for him despite his love for Chris.
The boys get even further scared when Kenny is hit by a bus, thinking it's God making an example out of him. Once they walk in on Maxi having sex with a woman in church, Cartman vows to make things right in being the leader for all children of Christ, while Satan is thinking about visiting Saddam's motel room... To be continued!

Episode 408

Something You Can Do With Your Finger

Jul 12, 2000
While sleeping, Cartman has a wonderful dream about being in a brand new boy band called Fingerbang with Kyle, Stan and Kenny. They decide that they need a fifth member, since all popular boy bands have five members. They hold the audition and Butters fails completely, as does Kyle's toddler brother Ike, but Wendy knocks them out! The only problem is that Wendy is a girl, and they're making a boy band.
Randy, Stan's dad, highly objects to Stan's being in the boy band, while Cartman sets up a meeting at the local mall amidst the rent-a-cops that spray mace in the eyes of just about anybody. The mall manager agrees to move the cheese and sausage cart to the side for a little bit to give them a few minutes to perform their song.
Right when they have their big chance to break free, Randy tells Stan that he cannot perform with the boys in their band. The reasoning is that he, too, was in a boy band in the late '80s, and knows the trials of being built up only to be let down. He finally convinces him to go for it, and Randy even fills in for Kenny after he dies.

Episode 407

Chef Goes Nanners

Jul 5, 2000
Mayor McDaniels is having a meeting with two opposing sides in the changing of the South Park flag, which depicts a black man being hung by four white men. Chef says that the flag is racist and needs to be changed to something more suitable, while Jimbo thinks that it's only traditional to keep the flag the way it is, as it's South Park's history.
The boys have to split into groups to debate the flag's changing. Stan, Kyle, and Kenny are on the staying the same side, while Cartman and Wendy think the flag can be changed. The KKK gets involved and backs Jimbo, who doesn't want their help as it hurts their chances of changing it.
Jimbo and Ned try to change the KKK's opinions, while Wendy and Cartman grow attached to one another, which erupts into a passionate kiss at the debate. Stan and Kyle don't believe the flag is racist, as they don't see it as a black man, but just any other man. This makes Chef have a change of heart, and they change the flag.

Episode 406

Cherokee Hair Tampons

Jun 28, 2000
While Kyle is sick at home, the substitute teacher that's filling in for Mr. Garrison suggests that the entire class gets together to make a get well card for him by decorating Butters up with balloons and glitter. The entire reason that Herbert is on leave is due to the child molestation charges on him from a week ago.
Garrison needs a good change of pace, and decides to write a trashy romance novel focusing on the female body. The only problem is that every time he tries to write, he cannot think of anything besides penises. Meanwhile, Kyle truly is sick, as his kidneys are finally giving way on him. Sadly, his mother is hooked on herbal medicine treatments to cure him.
Stan checks in with the doctor to see what's up with Kyle's kidneys, and learns that Cartman is the only one that can donate a kidney. Cheech & Chong sell herbal items as Native Americans, while Stan tricks Cartman into coughing up a kidney. Meanwhile, Garrison wins the best gay novel award.

Episode 405

Cartman Joins NAMBLA

Jun 21, 2000
When Cartman tries playing a political board game with Stan, Kyle and Cartman, none of the boys understand the purpose of any of it. Cartman claims that the boys aren't as mature as he is, and that he needs to get some older friends since he's outgrown them all. Kenny's parents pop in and tell Kenny that they're going to try to have another baby.
While Kenny is haunted by thoughts of his parents having another child, he tries to permanently damage his father's testicles. Meanwhile, Cartman decides to look on internet chatrooms for older male friends... that think he's wanting to have sex with them. When all of his new friends get arrested, NAMBLA steps in to try to free the child molesters.
When Cartman accidentally joins the wrong NAMBLA (opposed to Mephesto's North American Marlon Brando Look Alikes), he tricks the other kids into joining. But when they find out exactly what the NAMBLA group wants of them, they run for the hills while the police nab the NAMBLA members... after they rape Stuart McCormick.

Episode 404

Quintuplets 2000

Apr 26, 2000
When the four boys have to go to the French circus acts, they're dreading every second that ticks away during the two hours it's on... until they see the contorting quintuplet foreign girls that come out to perform their act. After that, the boys are all interested in the arts, and decide to start their own circus after seeing how much money the carnival is raking in.
Meanwhile, the Romanian quintuplets are off to escape from their countrymen, and plan a getaway with their grandmother. They wind up landing right at Stan's house, while the boys are practicing their own contorting circus. They blame their follies of Kenny's singing, which is quite good.
While Kenny decides to travel to Romania to become a world renown opera singer. The girls and their grandmother stay with Stan's family, but their grandmother dies while doing the nasty with Grandpa Marvin. It's a battle for custody of the girls as the United States and Romania wage war!

Episode 403

Timmy 2000

Apr 19, 2000
When the brand new student in Mr. Garrison's class, Timmy, refuses to do his homework and tries to speak to Garrison but cannot say anything besides his own name. Mr. Garrison sends him to Mr. Mackey and the Principal, who in turn believe that Timmy--who is literally retarded--has ADD, refusing to look at his actual problem.
After Timmy gets excused from all classes and assignments after he's diagnosed with ADD, all of the kids want to take the very generally passed test. All of the kids are diagnosed and thrown onto prescription drugs. Meanwhile, Timmy joins a hot new band to win a spot opening up for Phil Collins.
Phil Collins is appalled by the fact that a retarded boy is singing for the group that's opening for them, and the boys are complete drones due to the ritalin. Chef snaps them out of it, and Timmy rocks louder than ever!

Episode 402

Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000

Apr 12, 2000
When Token calls Cartman fat and cites cheating after they defeat Token's team in downhill sled racing. The boys agree to face the girl's sledding team on the hill soon enough. When Token admits that the boys will win due to Cartman's huge ass, Cartman throws a rock at him to knock him out. When the FBI finds out about it, they take Eric away and cite that it was a hate crime, since Token is black.
Eric is convicted to juvenile hall due to the hate crime incident, so he manages to get away from court and goes to Kenny's. Him and Kenny plot an escape on the Go-Go-Bronco. They make it to the Mexico border and it runs out of batteries, so Cartman is thrown in juvy with Romper Stomper, a mean kid with a heart of gold deep down.
Eric and Romper Stomper plan an escape, and Romper Stomper goes down. They cops catch up to them, but the governer has pardoned Cartman, so he leaves and the boys win the sled race after cheating.

Episode 401

The Tooth Fairy TATS 2000

Apr 5, 2000
When Cartman loses one of his teeth, the tooth fairy delivers him $3, he comes up with a plan to get more money to ripping Kenny's teeth out to plant them under his pillow and get even more money to buy a Sega Dreamcast... until they find out that Butters recently lost a tooth. They dress the Cartman up as the tooth fairy to steal Butters' tooth.
They start an underground tooth smuggling ring and plant them under Cartman's pillow until Liane goes broke from giving him her hard earned cash! She tells Eric that there is no tooth fairy, which devastates him and the other boys. They decide to use this "trooth" to their advantage, and start a scheme where they steal money from kids' pillows after they lose teeth.
They learn that another faction of the teeth stealing black market is taking their territory, so they meet with Loogie, their Italian leader. Meanwhile, Kyle begins questioning reality, and destroys time and space as we know it... just long enough to get out of their jam.

About This Show

Summary

South Park follows a large cast of characters in Colorado, and all around the universe beyond their quiet little whitebread mountain town that the show is named after.

Stan Marsh is a Catholic boy that attends church every now and then, has a girlfriend named Wendy, and his father (Randy) is a scientist... In fact, he's the only scientist in South Park. Sharon is his loving, complex mother, and he has a greedy, mean-spirited sister that's going through puberty. Don't forget about grandpa, who always wants to die, and his radical right-wing gun-toting uncle, Jimbo.

Kyle Broflovski is a devote Jewish boy that comes from a stereotypical yet caring Jewish family, where his mother (Sheila) tries to decide for every child's parents, and his lawyer father, Gerald, who loves money almost as much as his adopted Canadian son, Ike, who is Kyle's toddler sibling.

Eric Cartman is possibly the most notorious character in town, barking religious insults at Kyle, whom he claims to despise. His mother, who is all actuality is his father with a sex change operation, bakes him tons of sweets and other things to keep him nice and plump, so that he can appear as non-offensive as possible.

The rest of the colorful cast, ranging from Jesus Christ to Chef (the R&B-crooning cafeteria cook) to Kenny (the kid that dies in every episode), helps make South Park the weirdest place to live... at least in the States.