The Twitter Truth Matrix

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Look at that, we have a newcomer to the TTM. Dana "Lush" Loesch is a far-right uber-douche who, when given the chance, will find new and idiotic ways to not impress anyone of consequence.

In her first tweet on the TTM radar, Loesch tweets an apparent slam against embattled Toronto Mayor Rob Ford. Her insult? She compares Ford to Bill Clinton. That's right, she's comparing a President who got a blow job in the White House with a Mayor who: smokes crack, hangs out with gangsters, has displayed a misogyny and homophobic bent so vile that it defies all concepts of civility and regularly bullies staff, visitors and the media. Really Dana? Rob Ford is Bill Clinton's spirit animal? Well, if that's true and we use your standard, that would make Heidi Fleiss yours, that or some no name street walker on the corner of Hollywood & Vine. Either one would do.

Yes, Dana is truly a unique kind of sleaze-bag, so much so that, in a competition, we find she narrowly edges out Ann Coulter as the most vacuous, vapid, venal and vile of media whores...she even beat Sean Hannity and The Donald. The TTM chooses to treat her as such and 'translates' accordingly and without apology.

Ann "Media Whore" Coulter......just typing her name makes us ill and shudder with disgust. The TTM has little love for Coulter and, per usual, she tweets another example as to why.

In what could easily be described as a vile and not so thinly veiled slam against transgendered people, Coulter tweets a sickly bit of smarm that makes our skin crawl. She starts off with a snide remark that implies a transgendered person is somehow confused or mixed up. To add just the right amount insult, she words the smarm as a contorted version of the song "I am woman" by Helen Reddy. After that bit of sophistry, she proceeds to link a story regarding the California initiative allowing for transgender or gender neutral restrooms. The article itself is a snide bit of doucheyness unworthy of being taken seriously......brave it if you can.

Supreme white male of privilege Jim Hughes, writes an article so vile, it comes across as a child rape fantasy on his part.....creepy. Then again, Ann Coulter loved it so, naturally, it will be a disgusting display of disingenuous sophistry and cynical manipulation. With that in mind, the TTM clarifies the Coultergeist's tweet.......

Indeed, why won't God help? We ask this rhetorical question because it needs to be asked. You see, Thomas Peters AKA American Papist, is a Catholic mouthpiece who, among other things, believes Jesus would be a gun toting, ultra-conservative who would grind the poor and weak into dust. That, by the way, is not hyperbole, he's pretty made it clear that's how he sees Christ. Adding to Peters' strange brand of Christianity is the long since debunked notion of praying away the gay. That's right, like Tony "KKK" Perkins, Peters believes that God can cure homosexuality.

BUT........

If they both believe so strongly that God can cure "the gay", it has to be asked: why won't God cure Peters. You see, Thomas Peters had a swimming accident over the summer, an accident which left him a quadriplegic. It's an unfortunate turn for Peters and his family and many of his compatriots want to help, hence the tweet from Perkins today. Now, disregarding the incredibly poor selection of words used in the hashtag, we at the TTM found it odd that a man who, for so many years, advocated the idea of God curing people through prayer, wouldn't ask the very same God to cure him. Further, to have a money beg so as to pay for his medical bills, was in many ways, even more egregious. The reason? Peters and Perkins both believe that if you can't get medical insurance or afford health care, you should basically die. That also, is not a fabrication, they have both said so on several occasions.

Knowing what we know of these two men and knowing how the Tea Party and the republican party feel about religion, faith and health care, we couldn't help but revise Perkins tweet to better reflect their hypocrisy.

So this is the tweet that Brian "brownshirt" Brown tweeted today and yesterday and the day before that. In fact, Brian hasn't tweeted anything since Nov. 8th. Now, you may be wondering why; the answer may surprise you. You see, Nov 8th was the day Illinois passed Same-Sex Marriage. This is significant because Brown and NOM (National Organization for Marriage) had pretty much placed all their financial and moralizing eggs in the Illinois basket. Much to his and NOM's dismay, Illinois became the 15th state to pass SSM. We can only assume Brian is so heartbroken that he just can't tweet. Now, lest you think Illinois alone caused our Brian some grief, consider that not a couple of days later, Brian got the news about Hawaii. We can understand his feelings of rejection but hey, it's not as if he's not been responsible for others feeling the same way. He'll return to twitter soon enough, of this we have no doubt but, in the meantime, we can't say we aren't happy about his tantrum........

YAY! It seems like forever since we've heard from America's favorite squeaky toy, but here she is, Victoria "Squeaky" Jackson!!!

Ok, so we might be overplaying it just a bit but it is nice to see Victoria back on our radar. She'd been tweeting the same nauseating pap for weeks now and, let's be honest, it was pretty boring stuff. Not today though! Today, Victoria felt the need to offer up a brand spanking new conspiracy against President Obama.....this time, he killed 22 Navy Seals. Yup, President Obama, while busy with fixing the ACA roll-out and governing the U.S., apparently found time to travel to Afghanistan and murder 22 Navy Seals.....we assume it's because he had nothing better to do.

The story originates from the family of one Aaron Vaughn who, sadly, was killed in Afghanistan. Contrary to popular conservative belief, American soldiers are not gods, immortal or perfect......."but, but, but" says Victoria.....they died because....Obama. Now, the reality is that: the rules of engagement, which were set out originally by the Bush Administration, basically state that you do not fire unless fired upon. It's actually pretty standard stuff but to the Vaughn's (self-identified republicans) and Jackson, these rules are murderous in nature and, because Obama is President, he is personally responsible for Aaron's death. They've even wrote a book that purports to reveal the 'shocking' truth. Look, it's unfortunate that a young man has died but please, can we be spared the disingenuous and very obvious cynical politics at play here? Nope, not while there's money to be made off the grief of a family. And that's what makes this entire tweet all the more vile. Jackson knows this is really all just more of the same "we hate the black guy so let's make up some dirt" mentality. It's cheap, it's dishonest and it's repulsive. Where was Jackson's outrage when Bush sent 5000 plus to their deaths? Unlike Obama, there's proof of Bush's lies and manufacturing of 'evidence' that sent those men and women to their deaths.....and yet......nothing. Not a word. The TTM reminds Jackson of this inconvenient truth.......

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

A quick note to anyone visiting the blog today......we are sad to report that today's right-wing twittersphere has been rather lacking in tweets worthy of our notice. We believe this is due to the fact that most right-wingers are in mourning or, at the very least, having a bad case of the SADZ. You see, the passing of same-sex marriage in both Illinois and Hawaii in such short time span has them confused, frightened and feeling defeated....to which we say: GOOD.

Now, that being said, Peter "Porno Pete" Lababera has not been away from twitter. Case in point, his second bizarro tweet today. And this one's a winner on so many levels, it's a special kind of WTF of cognitive dissonance.

Some quick background: during the 2012 election, in which Nate Silver expertly and correctly predicted the outcome using mathematics and non-skewed data, Rasmussen Polling, a republican/conservative group, predicted a Romney landslide of over 350 electoral college votes. As we all know, they were dead wrong.....DEAD wrong. This is important as it relates to the tweet and, specifically, to the legitimacy of the facts as presented. Peter proudly tweets that 55% of Americans favor a repeal of the ACA AKA Obamacare. He further gives Rasmussen top billing as being the polling company who garnered the information. Rasmussen, having been handed their asses by Nate Silver in the 2012 election, is touted as somehow being accurate.......except, they're not. You see, when one looks closely at the poll, one finds that the data was developed by polling mostly 35 to 65 year old, right leaning or registered republicans. Can we say BUBBLE or BLINDERS. That Rasmussen's reputation for getting it wrong is well known and still, Peter touts their findings as gospel, is troubling in and of itself. That people will buy, is more so. The TTM quickly disseminates the BS and does so with a poke to the ego................

Wow, two days in a row, Matt "KKKloset Kase" Drudge is on a role. Here, Matt shares with us a secret. A secret so important and so newsworthy that we almost wet ourselves at the thought.....yeah right, as if. And what is the secret that Matt imparts? Well, Matt's not a multitasker don't you know. Apparently, it's not integrous or focussing.......whatever that means. He further goes on to speak of his success in a clutteredmanic world.....ok, we kind of get that but still.

The tweet is a sad self-congratulatory statement.....one assumes to his adoring fans, of which we admit, he has many. Granted, most are angry white men who hate the fact there's negro in the White House but hey, everyone has to have a following we suppose. Thing is, promoting yourself as having integrity kind of defeats the whole notion of, well, integrity. What's integrous about being closeted while being a lap dog to people who would shun you at a party if they saw. What's integrous about gossip, and let's be honest, much of what Matt puts out is smear and gossip pretending to be news. Of course, we could be accused of the same thing except, we make no claims to being a news outlet, an information dissemination blog or even a serious commentary. Ours is a satire and comedic commentary blog. We have no illusions of our place in the blogosphere and, frankly, we don't take ourselves seriously at all. We do this for fun, nothing more. If we impart some wisdom or insight, that's all gravy. But Matt, oh how he takes himself so seriously. Perhaps, if the day ever comes when he actually has some integrity and comes out, he might actually have so fun.......until then, he's just fodder for the TTM.

Oh that Peter "Porno Pete" Labarbera, always good for a 'red scare' smear.....and he doesn't disappoint. In this tweet, Peter goes full McCarthy with his accusation. MARXIST! he cries. HATE GROUP! he bellows. And who or what is the target of such attacks? The Gay Liberation Network, and yes, it's as sad and harmless as it sounds. You see, Peter's organization, AFTAH (Americans For Truth About Homosexuality) an actual certified hate group, was having a hate fest......err.....banquet when, to their shock and surprise, a group of gays, lesbians and their supporters exercised their free speech and protested the gathering. Their was no violence or Molotov cocktails thrown, merely bad chanting and poorly choreographed sign waving. OOOOOHHHH SCARY! Well, it was to Peter apparently. He took to twitter to decry the exercising of free speech as Marxism. Yeah, the irony of a man and group who, regularly disrupt pride parades and heckle pro-LGBT speakers at rallys, are complaining about others doing the same to them is clearly lost on Peter. Nevertheless, the TTM puts things in perspective..........

Oh......Dear........<insert deity name here> or WTF, if that suits you better. It's all we can say. Here's a tweet that is ever so.......something. Allen "War Criminal" West is tweeting about the ACA......well, at least he stopped calling it Obamacare.......and how, because the roll out was pooched, it is the equivalent of a massive military failure in Africa during the second world war. That's right, having a computer glitch is now akin to a military SNAFU in WWII. If it weren't so incredibly ignorant, we might laugh at this dubious tweet but, no, we can't laugh. Why? Because West, for all his bluster, still has a voice in republicanistan and Teatard land. His proclamations hold water to those of a lower intelligence and, as such, must be considered when dealing with him. The joke's on him of course because, let's face it, a military failure alluding to a past military failure while conflating it with getting people health care? well, let's just say West will never be considered a man of letters or a luminary. The TTM was amused though.........

(FACEPALM) Seriously Bryan? Seriously?? Bryan "Lyin' Fissure" Fischer has always been one for over-the-top hyperbole but this one really creeps us out. Bad enough Fischer poorly words his tweet but, to imply that teenagers are sexually dysfunctional? Of course, what Fischer means is, gay teens are dysfunctional.......and he can't figure out why some people don't like him.

What this tweet is all about is Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey recently signed legislation which, in effect, bans the torturous and psychologically damaging quackery known as reparative therapy on teens and minors. Reparative therapy has long been a mainstay of the Christian right and they have, for years now, caused incredible damage to the hearts, minds and spirits of many LGBT teens who would otherwise have grown up healthy and mentally secure in who they are. Many teens who have been forced to go through with this kind of "therapy" have been damaged to the point of no return and, tragically, take their own lives to escape what they see as a hopeless life of no love and no intimacy.

Pray away the Gay. That's the gist of it. A vile and duplicitous construct, devised and advocated by groups like NARTH (National Association of Research and Therapy for Homosexuality) and AFTAH (Americans For the Truth About Homosexuals). This practice of shaming and Bible thumping homosexuality out of an innocent human being is a form of gratuitous torture which many of it's practitioners revel in.

What Governor Christie did and what other Governors have done, is ban what is ostensibly the mind & spirit rape of children's minds. We at the TTM congratulate Gov. Christie and others for their support in ending a practice which, sadly, was only ever allowed in the first place because of the religious admonition that stated children were property. Disgusting.........

HAHAHAHA! Sometimes we just LOVE Matt "Bam-Bam" Barber.....if only for the entertainment he brings us with his obvious and, in this case, sexually charged tweets. We say sexually charged because, according the non-biblical scholar types like Barber and Billy Graham, the story of Sodom & Gomorrah is about gays and not, as many reputable scholars say, the acts of an inhospitable citizenry. Further, the use of the term punish in conjunction to Sodom & Gomorrah makes the sexual comparative all the more appealing.

The problem, of course, is that Barber knows ZERO about the Bible and even less about the facts as they are today in the modern world. Barber, along with Graham, lament the progression of LGBT rights in the U.S. and around the world. They gnash their teeth and bellow to anyone who will listen, that God will punish us for our grievous sin of being decent to other human beings........except, the facts don't bear out the assertion regarding God's apparent non-love of gay people.

Let's take the assertion of punishment. According the Evangelicals like Barber and Graham, God so hates gays that: any nation that tolerates or accepts LGBT's is deserving of punishment and will be cursed by God.

OK

Now, let's look at reality. Canada, Belgium, The Netherlands, South Africa and 13 other countries have; not only LGBT rights enshrined in law but, they also allow, to the consternation of many Christians, same-sex marriage. And yet........no Godly punishment. Not a whiff of discontent from on high.........nary a rise in the water, let alone a flood.

So what are we to make of this? Is God biding his time or, as is probably the case, he just doesn't care.....and that assumes he's even there to begin with. Oh, and as for an apology.....if God does exist, he needs to apologize for people like you. No Matt, sorry to tell you but, if there's any punishment to be had due to sexual impropriety, it's probably going to involve you in a rubber suit, tied down on a leather clad table and having yourself flogged by Mistress Demona. Hmmmm, perhaps this tweet is one of wishful thinking...............

Oh that Matt "KKKloset Kase" Drudge, always tweeting his deepest, darkest sexual fantasies. How else to explain this douchey tweet. Bill De Blasio, a Democrat, won the Mayoral race in New York City last week and well, you would've thought the Crips and the Bloods had just marched into town.......of course, given Matt's not so secret fantasy of being gang-banged, he should this as a two-fer.

Now, to be fair and honest, we are merely speculating as to what Matt's sexual proclivities might entail but, the tone of his tweet suggests a hint of desire. This is made all the more so by the accompanying picture from the poster for the film he mentions, The Warriors. Now, for those who have not seen this rather violent (for the times) gang banger flick, let's just say that gangsters seemed pretty.......that's it, pretty. The leans, sweaty bodies all macho and itching for a fight.......it's enough to cause any self-respecting queer an boner or, in Matt's case, any self-loathing queer too.

Of course, what Matt is really implying is simple, cynical right-wing bullshit: that being that, since a Democrat has now become Mayor of New York, the city will delve into chaos, crime and gun violence.......the last one being rather an odd criticism given Matt's almost erotic love of the 2nd amendment.

Anyway, it's a cheap shot by a republican sycophant who sees himself as somehow being of some relevance or importance to the GOP but, sadly for him, will never be accepted because of his gay 'lifestyle.' We can't and won't feel sorry for Matt as he dug this hole of puerile petulance all by his lonesome. Perhaps, if he ever grows up and starts looking at the world honestly, maybe......but not until then......

Given the tenor and the vile nature of the bogus and disingenuous nature of this tweet by Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann, we decided the only commentary to be made should be in our "translation." We believe it says it all where this cow is concerned.

Oh that Bryan "Lyin' Fissure" Fischer, always finding new and exciting ways to lie. In another exhibition of his dubious and, frankly, fraudulent tweeting, Fischer offers us a story about art being banned because of religious sensibilities.......yeah, think on that one for a minute.

What makes the tweet so egregious isn't the banning of the art.... most intelligent people would agree that art is highly subjective and; further, shouldn't be so easily banned or censored.....no, what makes the tweet so dishonest is the implied scope of the banning in question. You see, the sketches involved are being shown in a privately owned, small studio.......a far cry from the National Gallery in Berlin or Stuttgart. More dishonest still, is the idea that religions should A) be a factor in displaying work and B) because of religious sensibility, anything that is deemed unacceptable to the religious should be banned. Well, there's two thing wrong with those ideas: A) religions should NEVER be a factor when it comes to art, neither as subject matter or critique and B) religion has ZERO business banning anything because it's own insecurities.

Fischer lives in the United States, a nation with a long history of allowing free thinkers to express themselves yet, even he has, in the past, demanded the banning and censoring of art and artists which he considers to be unacceptable or offensive to his religious sensibilities; which, leads us back to his tweet and it's incredibly dishonest take on the situation in Germany. We at the TTM believe that censorship, especially due to a chosen religious lifestyle, is not only dangerous but it goes against the entire idea of freedom. Fischer loves to conflate and lie and but really?? One small studio does NOT a country make and whining about banning art while advocating the same at home........as many a great Drag Queen would say: BITCH PLEASE!

Oooh, looky here! We have new and exciting addition to the TTM line-up.....and this one is a special kind of 'special.'

Here we have Matt "KKKloset Kase" Drudge, a man who's sole purpose in life is to be a pain in the ass of anyone and everyone.......he wishes his penis was that big as to be a problem......but we digress.

Drudge is what you might call a kapo, someone who grovels and does the bidding of those who would normally cast him out......thinks Jews for Hitler and you get the idea. He's right-wing and proud. He believes staunchly in the republican motto of "I got mine so fuck you" and he's a believer in Christ.....or some such nonsense.

Now, with that all said, we found the following tweet of his to more than a bit amusing.....ok, we laughed....a lot. You see, we found it a tad odd that Drudge, mister capitalism himself, lamenting that Amazon would be offering Sunday delivery service. At first, we couldn't understand his beef until we were reminded of that believing in god stuff. You see, to Drudge, having Sunday service is a slap in the face to God......well, his God at least. To make his confusion all the more spectacular, he conflates Amazon's service as being a sign that the U.S. government is for sale. Hey Matt, trust us, ever since the SCOTUS ruled on Citizens United, the government has been for sale. This isn't even in the same league with the Koch Brothers or Rupert Murdoch.

The reality is this, if you believe in unfettered capitalism, you can't whine when someone exercises their right to it. Move on Matt, grow up, get out of your mom's basement.......get laid.....but please, spare us all the tut-tutting and fauxtrage regarding Sunday delivery. As a far right-winger on Fox might say: Matt, why do you hate money so much? Enjoy........

Hey, it's Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann! Haven't heard from her in awhile; then again, she's been too busy with the right-wing media circuit to have time to tweet.

It appears our intrepid "Crazy Eyes" is looking for a couple of interns to work with her over the spring, one in D.C. and the other in her Minnesota riding. Let's hope she pick young women instead of young men......lord knows what husband Marcus "Barbarians need discipline" Bachmann might do.

It's a sad state of affairs in the Bachmann household. You see, the Bachmann's own a Christian Counselling Center which, among other things, offers a way out of homosexuality......that's right, they have a "pray away the gay" business. The problem is Marcus Bachmann, for all Michele's insistence to the contrary, is a not so subtle flaming queen of a gay man. To be sure, protestations and declarations of his 'straightness' have been offered but, please, who are they trying kid? Themselves, that's who. No one else is buying what they're selling when it comes to Marcus. Anyhow, with that in mind, the TTM thought it would be appropriate, if not just a little naughty, to play on that fact...........

America: Continental name who's origins are that of Americo Vespucci, the map maker who first charted the coasts. Also a generic/catch all for the nation of the United States.

American: Name given to a citizen of the United States. Although, technically, anyone from North, Central or South America can be called the same.

'Murika: Generic/catch all name for those within the United States who, believing in their own superiority as divined by the religious fervor, believe they speak for everyone and tolerate no dissent or "the other" (see Tea Party, Republican, etc.)

These three distinctions are necessary if we are to understand the U.S. of A. In particular, the 'Murikan's who populate it. You see, in 'Murika, the only true American is a man; ostensibly, a straight one who loves God and the Constitution......specifically the 2nd amendment. Once this is understood, you can then understand the rather puerile and disingenuous nature of the following tweet by Bryan "Lyin' Fissure" Fischer. Fischer, ever the 'Murikan, believes that to be a patriot, a stalwart member of 'Murika, you must believe in the Christian God and only the Christian God, carry a Bible as proof of said belief and, of course, the constitution. The irony of this tweet is so deliciously blatant, one could almost feel sorry for Fischer and the many 'Murikans he represents.

The Constitution of the U.S. specifically prohibits any religious test by virtue of the 1st amendment and yet, for people like Fischer, you can't be a patriot unless you carry a Bible. Which brings us to the second problem with the tweet, the notion of carrying the constitution itself. How is it that, on the one hand, you demand people follow the constitution yet, on the other hand, violate the spirit of the 1st amendment? Well, for people like Fischer, the 1st amendment has not being correctly interpreted........apparently the line ".....shall make no law respecting the establishment of religion" is lost on them.

The twisted logic of 'Murikans is so contorted that the founding fathers, were they alive today, would probably feel a deep desire to slap them upside the head with a two by four. The founding fathers of the United States eschewed the idea of religion, in some cases, they were downright hostile to it. Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, John Hancock and Thomas Jefferson were leery of religion to the point of publicly denouncing it.....on more than one occasion. Hardly the fire and brimstone crowd Fischer would have 'Murikans believing in. It's a sad state when a once great nation is yoked with such ignorance and dubious con men. One can only hope that there are still enough Americans in the U.S. to stave off such un-American thinking. That said, the TTM does its best to reflect the reality.........

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Again with Fischer!!! The gift that keeps on giving. Well now, what do we have to say about this except.....OMG! Bryan "Lyin' Fissure" Fischer is warming up to the idea of evolution. Seriously, how else to explain this tweet. A study at Cornell University showed that hydrogel, a basic compound involved in possible life generation, was found to exist in clay. Now, to a scientist, this would merely be an interesting, albeit, transitory fact....but not for Bryan. Oh no, for Bryan, this is definitely the beginnings of proving the story in genesis as it pertains to the creation of man. As the story goes, God created man from dirt and, since clay is basically dirt, the fact the hydrogel, a component in the possible evolution of life on earth is in clay, it confirms genesis. Of course, had Bryan bothered to read the entire study, he would have noted that the hydrogel existed hundreds of thousands of years before primates walked the earth. So much for the earth being 6000 years old. Thing is, HE DID READ the whole thing and still questions the origins of the clay hydrogel. He doesn't dispute the age....he doesn't even dispute the assertion in the study that states the hydrogel was a component to EVOLUTION! So what are we to make of this? Is Fischer acknowledging evolution? We doubt it. Knowing Bryan, he's doing what he always does, conflating two very different postulations, one fact based, the other mythological, in the hopes of appearing to have solved the universal question posed by scientists and theologians alike. It's a scam, of course, meant to obfuscate the sheep who follow his daily preachings and money begs. We set the record straight.........

O-KKK Tony, whatever you say. Tony "KKK" Perkins, a man who lives to make the lives of others miserable, is all concernstipated over the Senate passing ENDA. ENDA, the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, is meant to ensure that gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered people cannot be discriminated against where their employment is concerned. This would include: harassment, being passed up for advancement, raises, transfers and/or termination based solely on their status as a homosexual etc. Frankly, ENDA is simply a matter of fair play. Of course, for the ultra-right wing Christians in 'Murika (not to be confused with America), this is unacceptable because......FAGS are against GAWD! Bad enough that LGBT folk have to put up with twisted Christians who believe Jesus would hate anyone but, to deny employment or, worse, to terminate a qualified employee solely on the basis of who they love, is offensive in the most vulgar way. Sadly, ENDA will probably not make it past the House, as republicans, ever the guardians of Christian and Tea Party fanaticism, will block its passage. Still, there is hope, if only because it has already caused a panic among those like Perkins. The TTM is most pleased......

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About Me

Political junkie with a passion for equality rights. Lean more to right on practical fiscal matters but leans left on matters of social justice, in other words, I am a pragmatic centrist who rarely sees things as rigidly black and white. Understands that there are grey areas in most discourse. Grew up an army brat and thus have lived all over the place.