Monday, November 18, 2013

Pot Dizzied Chiefs Lose Sunday Night's Game

Multiple NFL teams have complained the high marijuana to oxygen
ration inside Mile High Stadium gives the marijuana-trained Broncos an
unfair advantage at home against incoming teams from states where
marijuana remains appropriately illegal.

NBC commentators noted that several Chiefs players, including veteran
quarterback Alex Smith, complained of instantly feeling ‘dizzy and
nauseated’ when they took to the stadium to do stretches and practice
before the game started. Chief’s coach Andy Reid complained of feeling
like he was ‘having a stroke’ as he stood on the sideline, trying to
focus on his players and finding out why his receivers continually
dropped passes throughout the first half of the Sunday night game.

“It is suspicious when you have Charles dropping five your toss-ups and
Peyton Manning chucking 60-yard touchdown passes off his left foot to
his receivers, our guys hardly able to keep their balance and giggling,”
a stoic Andy Reid said, saying the Chiefs will get beyond this game and
prepare for San Diego next week.

Chiefs fans watching the game on Jumbo-tron back at Arrowhead Stadium
were equally skeptical. ”You have to wonder if the Broncos are trying
to give out contact high to incoming teams. They train in
marijuana-laden conditions, other teams cannot compete with that. There
is a conspiracy going on here and it involves the government of Colorado
itself,” Chiefs fan Nadia Botwin stated.

Botwin may have a reasonable concern. The Chief’s receivers did drop
the ball more than usual and even more questionable, the Chief’s
usually devastating pass rush was nothing but wobbly legs and failed
tackling attempts against an aging quarterback.

The image at right blatantly shows a marijuana-conditioned Broncos
player walking through a field of marijuana smoke earlier this season.

If the evidence and accusations are correct, the Broncos are actively
training in marijuana heavy conditions and then flooding the locker
rooms of visiting teams with marijuana, and the stadium with marijuana,
making the other team devastatingly ‘high’ and unfocused throughout the
game.

New Evidence AIn this video image, look at how the Chief’s coach cannot resist
playing tickle fingers with Fisher here. This is not natural and the
exact type of behavior you would expect to see of someone who was just
forced to inhale Colorado’s classic, cruddy skunk weed for the first
time.

New Evidence BBroncos fill the air with wafts of Colorado Skunk, churning the stomachs and minds of the pure-air-trained Kansas City Chiefs.

New Evidence C

Dwayne Bowe was caught this week training for the game,
by trying to smoke a little last second bowl as he sped toward the team
practice. Officers dropped charges for now after the Chief’s staff
explained how the players have to ‘try to train’ against the Bronco’s
cheating techniques.

New Evidence D

You have to wonder how much of Satan’s laughing gas Peyton Manning
smoked to play on that broken ankle, pain free. You don’t just ‘snap’
your ankle the week before, get a questionable MRI, then go out to chuck
60-yard touchdown passes on the run on your ‘bum’ right ankle without
hopping up on some sort of drugs. Considering Manning was not falling
asleep as he studied the Chief’s playbook on the sideline, we can only
guess he was high on marijuana.