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Thursday, March 27, 2008

Poop

First off let me say that I'm sorry I lied. I didn't stay away from the computer. I broke my self imposed grounding about a bajillion times since I grounded myself. It started with "let me just quick see if anyone commented to the blog where I say I'm grounded" then it was quickly right back into my old habit of reading blogs, commenting, emailing etc etc etc. So, nevermind about that self imposed grounding thing. The self discipline in the Mommy Lady?? It stinks.

As do several other things around here. I have come to the conclusion that I will NEVER be done with poop! Night before last? Avery has a diaper blow out. SHE'S ONE!!! SHOULDN'T SHE BE DONE WITH THOSE BY NOW??? Jim was on duty for that one. Last night? During Toby's birthday party? Avery has ANOTHER blow out! This morning first thing in the morning? No, no poop. Instead: partially digested carrots. I'm not sure which is worse, poop or vomit. Then later this morning after morning nap? Yup. Opened the door to a stink bomb. And to make matters worse, my ordinary super huge capacity washing machine is disconnected so we can re-plumb the laundry room. To his credit, before Jim disconnected the big guns he did put the itty bitty little washing machine that came with the house down in the basement. I helped. Now, instead of being able to wash a whole packed down and heaping full basket of wash at one time I can wash approximately three things. Socks, for example. Not so good when you have a baby who poos and pukes on all her bedding and outfits two or three times a day! Now I know I'm supposed to be feeling sorry for little Avery who obviously doesn't feel well. And I do. It stinks (ha ha) to be sick and not feel so good. But I can complain about the mess at the same time, right?

Plus also, as I was sitting composing this post, Aidan comes in from the outside. I tried to shoo him back outside "go outside and play or come in and take a nap". "No, Mom, wait! I pooped in my underwear." Grrrr. (In his defense he didn't actually, but started a little bit thinking it was a toot that wasn't.)

Well I am a boy and I thought that this post was not funny. I felt bad for little Avery. Plus how much poop can come out of a 1 year old? Its sounds to me that you needed a Super Deluxe Code Brown Tech for that job. I work in colorectal surgery so poop is a daily occurrence, so I don’t see the humor in poop. Now toots on the other hand, I don’t care who you are that’s funny. Have Fun Tara correcting my fragmented sentence. Who cares I have a IQ over 160 and ADHD.

Though I never intended this post to be funny, I'm glad some did find humor in it and am fine with the fact that some didn't!

As to how much poop can a 1 year old make? Let me tell you, plenty! We're talking up the back, down the legs, through the diaper legs and onto my shirt. Now, compared to the full adults that are in surgery I'm sure it isn't anything. However, those people are generally unconsious and not squirming all over the place while you're trying to clean them up!

My last job was in a daycare, and I remember one baby whose blowouts were unbelievable. Fortunately, he had a personality to make up for it, and he looked like a cupie doll. Anyway, one came near the end of my shift. I didn't realize how bad it was until I got him to the changing table. He even had it in his hair. I finally got him all cleaned up, and me all cleaned up, and as I was leaving, I checked my watch to see how long it had taken me. Guess what was on my watch. (Fortunately, it's a waterproof watch, so I gave it a good bath.)

His mom is a gastro. nurse, and she would give him enemas when he would get constipated. Thanks a lot for that.

About Me

I am a Christian, wife and mother to four kids. I love fancy coffee, Pepsi and baked goods. I also love to do crafty things. My current project is quilting, but I'm also dabbling in making other baby items!
I'm married to Jim and we have four kidlets. Evan (11), Aidan (8), Toby (6) and the pink caboose is Avery who is four.