These Artists Are Performing at Gathering of the Juggalos. Are They Scared?

The hills of Cave-In Rock Illinois are alive this week with the sound of the 14th Annual Gathering of the Juggalos. And while we have no doubt the vast majority of the fans are going to have a great time, we're a little scared for the performers.

After all, three years ago performer Tila Tequila had rocks and much worse tossed at her, and others like Andrew W.K. have had piss thrown at them. And while plenty of performers get treated great -- and the gig is said to pay well -- one wonders just how much nerve it requires to perform there. We asked comedian Jared Logan, wrestler Paul London and rappers Buckwheat Groats if they're shitting their pants right about now.

I don't know. I know ICP because a long time ago, when they came out, it was kind of the rage in wrestling. They came out with JCW: Juggalo Championshit Wrestling, which was just them riffing on matches. But as far as the Gathering goes, obviously it's growing in popularity, which is great for them.

Do you have a particular strategy to ensure the crowd doesn't pelt you with empty bottles of Faygo or feces?

I'm preparing for it by not preparing for it, I find that kind of works best for me. As far as my ninja training and throwing star technique, that's always at the top of its game, so no need to worry about that. My face-painting technique, that leaves a lot to be desired, but what is perfection? It doesn't exist and that's the beauty of the Gathering. Every oddity you can and can not image all mixed together. I've always wanted to be a part of the circus, so this is pretty awesome. There's too much complacency, you need to challenge yourself in someway. That's how you grow, I love that lifestyle. It's really raising the bar and accelerating that.

Were you given any warnings about the Juggalos?

No, not too many warnings. More-so "you gotta do this!" The "Drug Bridge" has been mentioned many times, whatever that says. I've been told you get piss thrown at you and things like that. You just go with it, I love that stuff. One of my favorite performers is Mike Patton, and I recall this concert he did with Faith No More in Spain. People were still throwing things and [Patton] picks up the bottle of piss and pours it on his face and the place erupts. I don't have any expectations, I don't want to have any expectations. I'd rather know as little about it as I can to see what happens. I might get killed, I might get arrested, I might get thrown in Clown Jail. Juggalo Jail.

Is there anything in particular you're looking forward to seeing at the Gathering this year?

Lil Dinky: July 26, 2002. We was at the Elks Lodge in Kennebunkport, Maine playing a round of craps with the guys. Someone said something about Gathering of the Juggalos and we was like "What's that." Then they said it's this place where these evil clown dudes give musical performances all day and female bodybuilders get soda dumped down their tits. We realized immediately that this was something we needed to be part of. Now, 11 years later, we are. And we couldn't be more excited.

How did you get the booking?

Penis Bailey: It was standard business. We had exchanged a couple of emails with the Psychopathic Records team then we're chilling out watching 50 First Dates one night and there's a knock at the door and we open it and three Hawaiian guys wearing trenchcoats are like "Are you the Buckwheat Groats?" and we don't really be fucking with Hawaiian guys like that so we're like "nah" and they're like "We're here to book you for the Gathering of the Juggalos" and we were like "oh word" and they had the contract in a Gucci briefcase they were like "You gotta prick your left ring finger and sign it in blood" and we were like "word word" so we did that.

Were you given any warned about the Juggalos?

Lil Dinky: You know, given our history of performing in dangerous places no one gave us any real warnings. We also heard there's a guy named Steve or Jeeves or something who camps near the Ferris wheel and likes to shout and crap all over himself and rub it on people so we will try our best to avoid him. Other than that we're anticipating a peaceful and stress-free weekend.

Do you have a particular strategy to ensure the crowd doesn't pelt you with empty bottles of Faygo or feces?

Penis Bailey: We'll have our security team with us, he's a one man team, George, and he's ready to defend us with his life. He comes from a jungle and he really gives not too many fucks. Very few fucks. If anyone decides to throw something at us, whatever it is, poop, rocks, if you even try to throw a baseball at us on some "Hey let's play catch!" shit, George will take you down. We've authorized him to use lethal force at his discretion. But we don't think that'll be necessary. The Juggalos are going to love us, we're going to love the Juggalos, it's going to be all love. Very excited to make some new fans and meet some nice people.

Is there anything else in particular you're looking forward to seeing at the Gathering this year?

Penis Bailey: We are looking forward to seeing all the love and feelings of family and community take place at the Gathering of the Juggalos, and also the Faygo wet t-shirt contest, where we hear there are gonna be women sticking a bunch of stuff up their fart box. We hear the burrito truck there is pretty good too. We're really looking forward to the Sevendust concert as well. Also Dinky says he wants to try meth while we're out there.

Jared Logan, comedian

When did you first heard about the Gathering?

I think it was a couple of years ago. They had a youtube video promoting it that was just...well, insane.

Were you given any warnings about the Juggalos?

People tried to warn me not to go, yeah. But I'm Pro-Juggalo. That's why I'm going. I think they have a message worth listening to.

Do you have a particular strategy to ensure the crowd doesn't pelt you with empty bottles of Faygo or feces?

My strategy is to go in with an attitude of respect and perform an act I think the audience will enjoy.

Is there anything else in particular you're looking forward to seeing at the Gathering this year?

Not sure. I think I just want to go in with an open mind and see what I see.