"Westboro Baptist Church, This False Prophet and His Blind Lemmings Welcome You to Our Whore House for God's Grace and Free Donuts," he writes on the Mars Hill's blog. "If you make it, we'll also give you free copies of my book, Doctrine, so you can learn what the Bible says about who God actually is."

Tempting the Westboro people to stuff their faces with sugarbombs won't silence their infamous signs, but it's a great way to get them to stop talking for a while. Then again, the plan only works if the Westboros actually accept the donuts; some versions of the Bible say that Eve actually offered Adam a donut, not an apple, from the Tree of Empty Calories, and that this is how we became so freakin' doomed. [Post-Intelligencer, Mars Hill Church, Image via AP.]