Sonic woke up still slightly tired. What had happened? Oh yeah...Amy Rose. It hadn't been the first time Amy had "happened" to him, even when he'd been with Sally. Sally. It stung, but he didn't have as much trouble changing train of thought that time. Maybe he was starting to be over her. Should that bother him? Oh well. Amy Rose. Gracious. She had been invading his life for the longest time. She'd never gotten the message that Sonic was with Sally, but now it was just as well. Sonic wondered why he hadn't just told Amy that he didn't like her a long time ago. Oh, wait--the one time he'd thought of it, he'd figured she'd never get the message and never told her. Maybe now that she'd gotten a little older, matured a bit, she'd understand. Maybe he should explain to her that he was heartbroken just then and would appreciate it if she'd lay off. No! She'd just convince herself that she was the perfect cure for him! Tails tapped on the door. "What is it?" "Oh! We thought you were asleep. Breakfast is ready." Sonic pushed himself up and out of his bed and shuffled into the kitchen. "Slightly burnt waffles, my favorite..." "Really?" E-102 asked. "I didn't mean to burn them, but now I'm glad I did..." Sonic let it go. He wasn't in the mood.~*~ The day dragged quite slowly, the previous two day's events reeling through his mind over and over, like a commercial that just wouldn't die. He missed Sally, plotted Antoine's death, and got irritated by Amy in turn. As the hours progressed, he didn't miss so much, he plotted less evilly, and he got more and more irritated. He sat in the chair by the window, watching the traffic pass by around the cul-de-sac. A woman in a fleece jacket went into the gift shop below. A mixed group of human and furry teens came out of the Burger Shop. The same taxi with the same passenger passed by six times within half an hour. An echidna couple holding hands sat on one of the benches below, kissing--that stung. A tall squirrel in a suit walked a pet dog. Amy left her building--that annoyed. A little old lady chatted with a young armadillo boy. A Flickie bird fluttered about looking for material for a nest in a tree by City Hall. A harried teenage fox girl chased after a hedgehog child. A limo dropped off some chameleon official at City Hall and a newspaper photographer was there to capture it on digital camera. An armadillo in a suit drove up to pick up the woman from the gift shop. Amy returned with a few bags, some grocery, some not--that also annoyed. Sonic almost laughed when an orange fell out of one of them.~*~ E-102 and Tails made dinner and Sonic ate, uninterested. After dinner, Tails brought out a bowl. "What's that?" Sonic queried. "I went down to the store earlier and bought another box of Jello!" Tails informed him cheerfully. "What color?" Sonic asked. "Red. I think it's strawberry." Tails set the bowl on the table. "I was very careful not to use too much water." He grabbed a spoon and two small bowls and stuck the spoon in to dish it out. But the spoon wouldn't go in. Sonic laughed. "Quit joking around, bud, I want some Jello!" "I'm not playing around!" Tails cried. Sonic raised an eyebrow and stuck his finger into the Jello. Or, rather, touched the Jello. It was stiff, hardened in the bowl. He shook his head. "You went a little overboard on using less water," he said. "Awww man!" Tails threw his head back in defeat. "Darn..." Sonic, not to be deterred, got a steak knife and, after much hacking and cutting, managed to get a piece out of it and put it into a bowl. Tails turned to put the large bowl on the counter and knocked Sonic's arm, causing Sonic to spill the hunk of Jello. It hit the floor. And bounced back up like a superball. "Whoa..." Tails said in reverence. "We should call the Jello people and tell them what we've invented here..." Sonic shook his head. "How are we gonna throw the rest of it away if it's stuck to the bowl?" he wondered aloud. "Heat it," E-102 suggested. "It will probably melt." They ended up having to do that, popping it in the microwave until it melted sufficiently to pour it down the drain. "Next time," Sonic told Tails, "Let E do it."~*~ As the sun sank into the west Sonic decided to see what was on TV. Anything to take his mind off his current troubles--Sally and Antoine, Amy, the whole darn mess. The chameleon official was on live from City Hall, giving a speech about why he wanted to be elected to the position of--Sonic flipped the channel to a documentary on the history of the Mobian royal family. He flipped it again. A guy in a suit behind a pulpit reading from the tomes. Sonic sighed. Religion had its place, but TV wasn't it--another flip. A ballgame. Sonic sweatdropped. Who wanted to watch sports when you could play them?

A movie. It had been on for an hour, probably, but Sonic paused momentarily. There was a bird's-eye shot of mass destruction. A shot of a typical office building--then with loud reverberations, it exploded. Then it cut to an echidna guy standing next to a bed, in which lay a hedgehog girl very obviously wearing nothing but the sheets. Another flip. An emu stood with a blank expression and laughter was heard. A sitcom imported from Downunda. Flip. A skimpily-clad koala girl strummed a guitar and sang. The shot switched to a hot car going 90 miles an hour in beat to the music. The music channel. Flip. "And that...is how...you can clean your silver without any effort," an echidna woman with short, perfectly coifed blond hair informed her audience. The show's logo popped up, "Martha Steward". Flip. An infomercial for a business that could make you millions!--minimum investment required. Flip.

Talkin' bout sick showsThere's America's Funniest Home VideosI can't believe my eyesWhen I see the kind of stuff that wins first prizeSomebody's poor old momFalls down off the roof, lands right on the lawnFace first on a rakeI hear they got it on the seventeenth takeThat's funny as a kick in the crotchAnd that kinda show, uh, I can't watch

Bloopers. Outtakes. Home videos. A boy ran over his little sister with his bike. There was something wrong with home videos that showed blood. Flip.

An alligator woman was dancing around the screen, hugging the echidna host, and carrying on like she'd won a million dollars. A number flashed across the bottom of the screen--she had won a million dollars. Stupid gameshows. Flip. The weather channel. Cute fox chick pointing out the day's high and low temperatures. Sonic glanced through the TV directory out of the paper. Nothing.

Cosby show and RoseanneThink I've taken 'bout as much as I can

Flip. A small, kawaii hedgehog child elicited a laugh from an offscreen audience and a male fox just shook his head. Another stupid sitcom.

Judge Wopner, oh myYou gotta be Rainman to like this guy

A live courtroom battle. Apparently some chameleon lady had backed her car into her echidna neighbor's flowerbed and ruined his prize hybrid tea roses that he'd been hoping to enter in a competition. Flip.

Thirtysomething's all rightIf you like hearing yuppies whining all night

Snotty rich people sitcom. Flip.

Can't stand Twin PeaksWish they'd lynch those donut-eatin' freaks

Sitcom centered at a coffee shop. Flip.

Those Siskel and Ebert bumsOughtta go home and just sit on their thumbs

Here's how to order-money back guarantee-Removes tough stains fast-it tastes more like fresh peanuts-They keep going and going-don't hate me because I'm beautiful-Could be dandruff-our prices are insaaaane!!!

Flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip. Nothing!

Stop! Prime time!I'm pretty sure I'll be sickIf I have to watch another stupid pet trick

Or that guy with the real flat hairThat goes "woof woof woof" and wavesHis fist in the airOr those weird talk showsAbout transsexual Nazi EskimosThey're rude, and crude and vileJust for a minute let's flip down the dial

A hedgehog woman held out the mike to a sobbing fox man. "I swear...I never meant to hurt her!" he cried. The woman shook her head. "We'll return shortly and talk to his daughter." A headline came up at the bottom of the screen. "Arranged marriages: security or hell?" Flip.

Flip, flip, flip; yecch, I can't watch thisLook, man, I can't watch thisI can't take this torture no more, I can'tI can't watch thisPay the bills, station breakBreak it down!

A young fox woman in the middle of her backyard wearing her white, lacy, sexy nightgown screamed into the night. A scary-looking armadillo emerged from the bushes, wielding a bloody knife. "I WILL BE AVENGED!" B-movie. Flip.

Operators are standing by-cubic zirconium necklace-You're soaking in it-and our fabulous swimsuit issue-When you've got a headache this big-read the book-This is your brain on drugs-I've fallen and I can't get up!!!

Flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip. Nothing again.

Stop! Cable time!HBO and Playboy, Showtime and MTVI might like them more after my lobotomy

Flip. Sonic hit the all-movie channels. A fox couple stared at each other over a candlelight dinner. "Will you marry me?" Flip. A young chameleon man jerked a pretty echidna girl out of harm's way. She looked at the truck that had almost run her over, then looked at her hunky rescuer and plastered her lips to his. Flip. Four young women in a convertible with the top down waving their arms in the wind. Chick flick. Flip. A hedgehog couple trapped in a laser-walled chamber. "And if two you try to escape, you'll die!" The man turned to the woman. "Got a bobby pin?" She pulled something out of her hair and handed it to him. He jammed it into the floor and the lasers disappeared. Flip. Another music channel airing a live special. An echidna singer destroyed his guitar. Flip.

Now why did I ever pay for this junk?I hooked up eighty channels, and each one stunk

Another documentary, this one on a famous author. How could there be so many channels airing nothing worth watching?

Sonic sighed. The next flip brought him back to the chameleon at City Hall. "Forget this!" he cried, chucking a pillow at the TV. Thankfully, it hit the power button and the screen went dark. He went into his room and turned on the stereo. He located a CD and popped it in, and within minutes the soothing strains of loud, screaming guitar filled the room. Someone in the apartment above stamped their feet. "Turn that down!" Sonic pretended not to hear. He pushed aside the blind and peeked out the window of his room. Amy was down eating at the Burger Shop. He lowered the blind, but for some reason couldn't keep himself from watching. He kept the opening he watched out of as small as possible to avoid being seen. She laughed loudly, he could see, and practically stood up in her seat as she called for her check. She glanced at it and handed the guy probably more than she owed. Whether she told him to keep the change or credit it to her tab, there was no way of knowing. As she left the shop and walked over to the door that led to her staircase, Sonic pulled back from the window. What was he doing?!