Yes, you read that right. And yes, that’s really what it’s about. A thirty minute poop joke, give or take. And I can’t even facetiously call it “bathroom humor”, since no bathrooms are involved. So if any of this offends you…what show did you think you were watching? By the way, we’re down to one episode per week with the arrival of “Testees”. Should be back to a full hour very, very soon from the looks of that show. Anyway…

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Yes, you read that right. And yes, that’s really what it’s about. A thirty minute poop joke, give or take. And I can’t even facetiously call it “bathroom humor”, since no bathrooms are involved. So if any of this offends you…what show did you think you were watching? By the way, we’re down to one episode per week with the arrival of “Testees”. Should be back to a full hour very, very soon from the looks of that show. Anyway…

1:30 PM, on a Wednesday, and Dee is looking for something to do. She has an idea about rounding up a few girlfriends and hitting the town as if they were on Sex and the City. But, as the guys are quick to point out, she has no friends. She brings along The Waitress, in exchange for a notebook Charlie has been keeping of her daily activities. Dee brings her and Artemis to a local bar, where she knocks The Waitress off the wagon by forcing everyone to drink cosmos, while Artemis trumpets embarrassing things about her anatomy (“Hey…He would have found out anyway!”) Dee takes them shoe shopping, but the store doesn’t have a size 13. Still drinking, The Waitress tries to attack the saleswoman with a bottle, but misses and collapses. When Dee’s card is declined, she tries to run from the store wearing the shoes she has squeezed herself into, but she trips out the door and slams into a parked car, triggering the alarm.

Charlie and Frank enter the bar arguing, and Frank is blaming Charlie for pooping in the bed. Intrigued by the mystery, Dennis decides to investigate. The four guys hit a lab, where the technician refuses to match the sample to anyone’s DNA. They run into someone else in the hall, but after dissecting the stool, he admits he’s not a scientist. Mac feels that they need to reenact the episode, then calls for overnight observation. When morning comes, all four guys are asleep in the same bed, along with a new sample. Returning to Paddy’s, Dennis decides that they need a fresh sample, so he spreads newspaper across the floor. The guys drop trou just as Dee and her friends walk through the door.

Dee runs out and heads to an art gallery, but the discussions lead her to see poo in every exhibit. She runs back to the bar as a thunderstorm hits, and Artemis is piecing together the mystery. The lights go out. When they return, there is a new piece of poo on the barroom floor. Artemis lays out a stylized recap of all the events. She blames everyone, including The Waitress as having a hand in it. When she finishes, Frank confesses to all the incidents, and even notes that he did another one while she was talking. Why? “Because poop is funny.” The guys all shrug and agree. Dee quietly says, “I hate my life.”

Larry David once mentioned the “Cringe Factor” when talking about Curb Your Enthusiasm. It’s on ten with this episode, particular with visuals that rival the Baby Ruth scene in Caddyshack. Makes you wonder what else the prop guy came up with. But it is balanced well against Dee’s storyline and the Scooby Doo/Agatha Christie interrogation by Artemis. Mr. Hankey would be proud.

There’s my two cents, laundered and sterilized as clean as I can get them. What do you think? Drop them in the comments or drop me a line at: tom@thetwocents.com .