I've gone 5 years without sex, which I do not recommend. I last got laid at the beginning of August, but now that I'm no longer on hormonal birth control, my sex drive is out of control. Sigh. I guess it can't be too bad because I still have standards.

I don't even have anyone to lower my standards for!!

Who am I kidding, I'm just shy and don't know how to flirt nor do I usually know how to perceive someone elses's flirt.

I'm actually not particularly shy anymore, so I really don't know what my excuse is. I am generally very oblivious though, which is why I am driving myself bonkers trying to interpret my crush. I am determined to do something about it next month when I'm back in town, assuming my clueless, socially challenged self can figure out what the hello to do.

Btw, it has been almost 10 yrs for me. Hopefully nobody else here is pathetic enough to beat that record, except by choice. So, can I be queen of the no sex thread? It might make me feel better.

_________________"This is the creepiest post ever if you don't know who Molly is." -Fee"a vegan death match sounds like something where we all end up hugging." -LisaPunk

Three years and a bit, but it's okay. I might rather live without intimacy. I'll leave now before I depress you all. :D

_________________Yeah it’s two R’s, h-o-r-r... yeah, right."So something ripped him open and ate out his insides?" "Like an oreo cookie! ... well, except for, you know, without the chocolaty cookie goodness."DON'T WARN THE TADPOLES!

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:48 am

Tofu Pup

Joined: Sun Oct 24, 2010 12:39 amPosts: 3

21.5 years, sex-free (so, virgin). 16 years of not being at all ready, 3 years waiting to be in love, 2.5 years of just plain old bad luck (period, whiskey/anti-depressant dick, having to give people rides home, etc). I think I might lose claim to my vagina if I don't get this resolved soon.

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 5:59 am

Chard Martyr

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 6:49 pmPosts: 9636Location: SW Desert, USA

Bun wrote:

TEN. DAYS.

You're super hot, so that must feel like an eternity.

guy burgess wrote:

I just turned down an offer of sex. Hanging out at home alone, watching stuff and sleeping soon seemed much more appealing. I think i'm getting old.

Is that how we know when we're getting old? I'd at least like the option to choose. That might require actually going out and socializing with people, which I dislike. I'm thinking of just hooking up with my friend to break this streak.... but then things might get awkward.

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:08 am

Kale Wreath

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 7:06 pmPosts: 836Location: Vancouver

guy burgess wrote:

I just turned down an offer of sex. Hanging out at home alone, watching stuff and sleeping soon seemed much more appealing. I think i'm getting old.

Nah, the important question is whether it was a promising offer or not. If you're turning down an offer that's just kind of 'meh', that's ok, but if you're turning down good sex, then you might be getting old...

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:24 am

Queen Bitch of Self-Righteous Veganville

Joined: Sun Sep 05, 2010 2:21 pmPosts: 11750Location: Illinoize

I can't believe anyone is posting in this thread about how they haven't had sex in a month or less! Come on, people!

I don't want to prostitute the ppk out, but maybe we can get a sporking exchange going. So people can cuddle.

_________________"The Tree is His Penis"

The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:43 am

Thinks chickens are assholes

Joined: Wed Oct 20, 2010 1:17 pmPosts: 5862

Is it bad that I enjoyed being pressed up against by a strange man last night? The bar was heaving and everyone was pressed against someone, we came in from the freezing cold, he was warm, not sweaty, smelt really good and wasn't using the situation for a bit of "rubbing".

Post subject: Re: A thread not about the sex that some of us aren't having

Posted: Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:48 am

Semen Strong

Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:10 pmPosts: 22092Location: Cliffbar NJ

fezza wrote:

Is it bad that I enjoyed being pressed up against by a strange man last night? The bar was heaving and everyone was pressed against someone, we came in from the freezing cold, he was warm, not sweaty, smelt really good and wasn't using the situation for a bit of "rubbing".

I'm afraid my creepy is spilling out of PPK life into RL O.O

Its not bad until you start humping his legs, closing your eyes and moaning gently to yourself. I really miss being single...

_________________My oven is bigger on the inside, and it produces lots of wibbly wobbly, cake wakey... stuff. - The PoopieB.

THROW A forking YAM IN THE OVEN ITS forking CHRISTMAS - LisaPunk

Last edited by Tofulish on Sun Oct 24, 2010 9:49 am, edited 1 time in total.