At the Caltech cafeteria, Sheldon is musing while eating lunch and asks which life-form the guys would want to merge with. Raj wants to join a swan to have the long graceful neck he always wanted. Leonard suggests a horse for the height and genital size. Howard likes the idea of merging with a kangaroo to become a "kanga-Jew" that can dunk basketballs. Sheldon prefers lichens, (a combination of algae and fungi) so that he can be three types of organisms in one. Raj then switches the topic and asks about Howard's bachelor party. Howard mentions that he promised Bernadette no strippers. Raj and Sheldon want to take a wine tasting train trip through Napa Valley.

At the apartment building, while Penny is walking up the stairs with Leonard, she tells him that she won't worry about him at the party since he never does anything crazy. She asks him what the craziest thing he had ever done with a woman is and that when they had sex in the ocean it doesn't count. Amy is filming the girls making wedding party gifts and asking Bernadette what their first married sex position going to be. Penny tells Amy to start asking other bridal party questions, which takes all the fun out of it for Amy.

Sheldon tries to roast Howard. Bazinga!

A drunk Raj brings up too much of Howard's past.

At the bachelor party, Sheldon has a couple of words with Wil Wheaton on being Howard’s friend. Stuart tries borrowing some money from Leonard to pay for the evening as Howard and Raj arrive. As the toasts begin, most of Sheldon's jokes fall flat, though he does give Howard a "double bazinga" and wishes him good luck. Leonard tells everyone he has had sex in the ocean and he can do crazy things. Stuart tells Howard that he has everything and that he is very unhappy living in the back of the comic book store. Barry Kripke just complains that there are no strippers. Raj tells everyone how Howard is his best friend, that when he came to America that he was very lonely, but after finding Howard, he realized they could be lonely together. He finishes up with the stories about Howard losing his virginity to his second cousin, having group sex with a heavy Sailor Moon girl at Comic-Con and Leonard and Raj paying for a Jewish role-playing prostitute in Las Vegas (to cheer him up after he was dumped by Leslie Winkle). Wil Wheaton records it all and uploads it onto the internet. Bernadette picks Howard and Raj up since they are drunk and is mad at both of them after seeing the video. She wonders how she can marry a man that she doesn't seem to know. The girls turn out not to be much help to her. Amy, for instance, suggests she has sex with a cousin to get even with Howard. Realizing Penny set them up while knowing Howard's speckled past, she asks Penny why she did so. Penny's response is insensitive because she didn't think their relationship would go further than meeting his mother or sleeping together, since the signs were there. Bernadette storms out crying.

Is Will Howard's friend too?

They find Raj's toast on Youtube.

At first Howard keeps calling her and can't get any good advice about women from his friends. He shows up and gives Penny a message that he was sorry, that he also doesn't like the man he used to be and that the man Bernadette knows is who he is because of her. Penny gushes that that was the most beautiful thing she had ever heard and that it came from Howard of all people. Bernadette hears him and tells him that the wedding is not off, though she is still quite angry with him. They all end up in a group hug which Amy finds "hot".

Later, Leonard meets Penny in the laundry room and tells her that they are going to get crazy and have sex on one of the machines. Penny declines and tells him to help her fold her sheets. He agrees and says that folding sheets in his boxers is pretty crazy too.

The TV Critic: "The Howard-Bernadette story was surprisingly simple, effective and believable. We know that Howard had a sleazy past of hitting on women relentlessly and I had just assumed that Bernadette was aware of that. But instead the writing plausibly portrayed her as seeing only the light side of him and not the grimy one...This wasn't a particularly interesting episode until the end where things wrapped up nicely. However it does continue the wedding story line which hopefully will provide for an interesting season finale."[2]

Sheldon asks, "If you could merge with another species, what species would you pick and why?" Raj states "I'd pick swan because, uh, the resulting hybrid would have the advanced industrial civilization of a human and the long graceful neck I’ve always dreamed of having." Leonard responds, "Horse, but mostly just for the height. A little bit for the genital girth." Howard answers, "Kangaroo--uh, I’d be a Kanga-Jew. The first of my people to dunk a basketball." Leonard adds, "Also instead of just living in your mother's house, you could actually live inside her body." Sheldon then says, "Clever, but also wrong. No, the best organism for human beings to merge with is the lichen itself. That way, you’d be human, fungus, and algae. Triple threat. Like three-bean salad." In "The Weekend Vortex", Penny makes animal references regarding Leonard and Sheldon after Leonard mentions being saddled, "Sorry, Stallion. Your weird friend Giraffe is here." She also says Sheldon looks like a giant praying mantis in "The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem", later repeated by Leonard in "The Justice League Recombination", and Leonard revealed a doctoral candidate tweeted he looks like a giant insect in "The Thespian Catalyst". Meanwhile, Leonard said of Sheldon, "It's like living with a chihuahua," in "The Infestation Hypothesis". Additionally, in "The Psychic Vortex", Howard refers to Leonard and himself as horses: "These broncos have been saddled." Amy, in "The Date Night Variable", calls Sheldon a sexy praying mantis and says that they devour their mates. In "The Tenure Turbulence", Howard calls Leonard, Sheldon, and Raj meerkats and mockingly impersonates one.

When the guys are discussing the animals they want to be fused with, Howard and Raj happen to be dressed in clothing with colors matched with the animals they answered; Raj is wearing white for swan while Howard is wearing brown for kangaroo.

Sheldon: I wish you could all be inside my head. The conversation is sparkling!

Raj: Anyone has any words they'd like to say about the man of the evening?

Sheldon: Yeah, I do.

(Everybody groans)

Sheldon: Howard, I wish you nothing but happiness. Bazinga! I don't! Double-bazinga! I do!

Sheldon: Good luck following that.

Raj: Anybody else? Huh? No? Okay! It all comes down to me, as the best man. (Stands up) Ooo, this grasshopper's kicking my ass-hopper. Okay, okay. When I first came to this country, I, I didn't know how to behave, or how to dress, or what was cool, I was pretty lonely. But, then I met Howard and suddenly my life changed, because, we could be lonely together. This man became my whole world!

Kripke: Yeah, nice speech Francine! (Tucks some cash into his pants)

Raj:(Takes out the money) I'm not done but, thank you! I think back, to all the good times we had, like uh, when we went camping, and spent that night telling each other all our secrets.... I told him, I'm addicted to pedicures, and he told me he lost his virginity to his cousin. (Everybody laughs)

Howard: She was my second cousin.

Sheldon: And the first woman you ever disappointed sexually.

Raj: Oh, oh yeah, and then there was a time when Leonard and I took Howard to Las Vegas and, and paid a hooker to pretend she was Jewish, and that she wanted his little Kosher pickle. (Everybody laughs again) Of all the Howard-humping-hooker stories, that was my favorite!

Howard:(Stands up) Okay, buddy! That's it. Sit down.

Raj: Oh, oh, what about that, that tubby girl in the Sailor Moon costume at Comic Con?

Howard: I don't remember. Please sit down.

Raj: The only threesome I've ever had in my whole life. And I'm proud to say it was with this man, right here! (Everybody laughs)

Howard: Please, shut up.

Raj: Oh, oh, don't get me wrong. Nothing happened with me and Howard. There was about, 200 pounds of Sailor Moon between us!

Wheaton:(Recording the entire speech with his phone) Oh, internet, this is SO going all over you!

Leonard: You know, there's nothing wrong with helping some woman's kid get through their SATs.

Howard: So, what did you do tonight?

Bernadette: I found this. (Bernadette lifts up her phone and a video plays talking about Howard's previous affairs)

Raj: You know, my apartment isn't that far, if you stop now, I can walk home.

Bernadette: You're not going anywhere, three-way. You lied to me, you said you told me about all the women you've been with, but you never told me about your cousin, the prostitute, or Raj!

Howard: The prostitute was a gift! Shame on you, Raj, this is not how we treat women in this country!

Bernadette: Oh, no, you are not blaming him!

Raj: Thank you, Bernadette.

Bernadette: Zip it, pervert!

Kripke: I’ll go. Howard, I’m gonna say something to you that evewybody’s thinking but no one has the couwage to say out woud. When you invite a man to a bachewor pawty, the impwication is, there will be stwippews. Maybe not compwetewy nude, but at weast pasties and G-stwings. That’s not unweasonable.