Saturday, February 11, 2012

I Bought Dan Ackroyd's Vodka in a Crystal Skull!

Did you know that when Dan Ackroyd's not out busting ghosts, he is actually making some of the world's best vodka? And I'm not talking about wearing overalls and no shirt and making a batch in the bath. Oh no, I am talking about vodka that is distilled four times and then triple filtered through DIAMONDS. It has not just won a gold medal, but a DOUBLE-GOLD medal. At the Vodka Olympic Games!

Oh, and buy the way... did I mention that the bottle is a GODDAMNED CRYSTAL SKULL?!

Now, I haven't drank much alcohol at all in the last year or so, but I'm a big fan of Dan Ackroyd, I'm one of the few fans of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and I wanted to pay back Dan for keeping paranormal activity in the New York area to an all-time low. Seriously, you guys, I needed to buy some of this crazy expensive supernatural skull vodka. So that's exactly what I did!

Join me after the jump for more photographs as I unbox my bottle of Crystal Head!

So this is what the box looks like, and rest assured it is deceptively heavy...

And here's the back where you can read the spiel about how the vodka is squeezed out of diamonds by busy Canadian mountain virgins...

Sadly the box is empty aside from the bottle. I was actually hoping for more paperwork, like perhaps a signed glossy of Dan Ackroyd, a certificate of authenticity, and maybe some unused script pages from Ghostbusters 3.

But of course the real beauty is in the incredible bottle which looks a lot like this and is filled with common sense and dignity eroding vodka! Here's some photographs I took of it in front of a bright light!

I have to be honest with you, as an object, I actually find it to be a little unsettling. I'm pretty sure it has some kind of supernatural, possibly psychic powers, which could possibly take a hold of me and make me do things that I'm ashamed of.

I haven't actually tried it yet, but I did pull out the stopper and take a whiff of it and it smells satisfyingly potent. I will be sure to go on a vision quest with it tonight and will be sure to inform you of any mind-blowing revelations.

I AM DRINKING OUT OF A GODDAMN CRYSTAL SKULL, PEOPLE. Cheers, Mr. Ackroyd!

4 comments:

Hey! Who told you about our Mountain Virgins!!! You just stay away from them, you hear!! :D

I got one of these over Christmas...it's very cool but it actually IS unsettling....I gave it away :D Got a taste of the vodka though. Not too bad, although I doubt connoisseurs are buying it for anything but the bottle and novelty...