We recently posted Soviet adaptations of American scifi tales. But what happens when Americans rework Soviet toons? The English dubbing of this Russian cartoon is so damn bad your gray matter will begin oozing out your ears.

In the waning days of the U.S.S.R., Russian animators turned their eyes toward short stories…
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This 1974 cartoon Kak lvyonok i cherepakha peli pesnyu tells the story of a lion and a turtle serenading each other in the sun. It's adorable, jazzy, and - judging from its Youtube comments - a children's classic. Watch a few seconds of this cute animation just to get the gist of it.

Here's the English dub. It absolutely shits all over everything charming and memorable about the above cartoon. It sounds like it was dubbed in 5 minutes. Nothing syncs up. The turtle was apparently voiced by Rodney Dangerfield's insane twin brother who's been huffing turpentine for the last several months. If you view more than 5 minutes of this, you become - to paraphrase io9 tipster Anna - locked on a Möbius strip of pure madness. You've been warned.