So I'm at home sick today, which means I'm meandering around the internet and I came across this letter from Supreme Master (Ching Hai--the lady playing on the TV in every Loving Hut restaurant)...apparently to reach enlightenment you need something like 8 billion points. I am screwed.

how much nonsense tv can i watch before it counts? like, is it 30 points for an entire episode, or am i penalized for not closing my eyes when i flip past 90210 on my way from pbs to the news? because if i can erase six hours of bates motel with one hour of meditation . . . i don't know, that seems like a pretty good deal.

_________________"rise from the ashes of douchebaggery like a fancy vegan phoenix" - amandabear"I'm pretty sure the moral of this story is: fork pants." - cq

Joined: Tue Nov 30, 2010 8:03 pmPosts: 6308Location: The State Of No R's

According to this list, I am for sure going to hell.

Are we really expected to be vegans and not have many satisfied poops?

_________________"...anarchists only want to burn cars and punch cops."- nickvicious"We'll be eating our own words 30 years from now when we're demanding our legislators outlaw aerosol-based cyber dildo-wielding death holograms."- Brian

So I'm at home sick today, which means I'm meandering around the internet and I came across this letter from Supreme Master (Ching Hai--the lady playing on the TV in every Loving Hut restaurant)...apparently to reach enlightenment you need something like 8 billion points. I am screwed.

also, ducks are crassholes. i can totally see them not being noble enough. were you aware that ducks' vaginas have evolved to prevent fertilization of their eggs from rape? no wonder their NQ is so low. it's all that satisfied sex. (at least for the males)

Also, I was thinking last night about the concept of addressing oneself as Supreme Master. What would life be like if I went through it believing myself to be the Supreme Master? Is it on her driver's license? Does she have SMaster personalized plates? (Because Supreme Master is too many letters to fit on regular license plates) Driving is probably a deduction. Does H&R Block process the Supreme Master's taxes? Does she contemplate her pet kitties NQ scores?

also, ducks are crassholes. i can totally see them not being noble enough. were you aware that ducks' vaginas have evolved to prevent fertilization of their eggs from rape? no wonder their NQ is so low. it's all that satisfied sex. (at least for the males)

And then duck penises evolved to match them. They're like puzzle pieces.