--Foppish finery from Brooks!
--Blather from me!
--Gin, which will exude from your pores the following morning!
--Music from Sligo Creek Stompers, pioneers of a new musical genre called "Straight-Edge Death Klezmer!"

I hope to see you there, and if not I'll see you back here on this blog on Monday, April 22nd, still reeking of gin.

Speaking of Brooks, you may notice they have an ad over there in the right-hand margin, and you may also notice from that ad that they're inviting 100 riders to test their new "Cambium" saddle, which is 100% cow-free:

(Listen closely and you'll hear bovine sighs of relief.)

Here's more information in case you're too lazy or ornery to click on the ad:

The Cambium is made from a uniquely flexible natural rubber and organic cotton top, enhanced by a thin layer of structural textile for added resilience. This waterproof top, which follows the rider’s movements, is immediately comfortable, maintenance-free, and highly abrasion-resistant to offer the longevity for which Brooks is legendary.Working up to the 17th June release, Brooks is selecting a diverse group of 100 individuals worldwide to be the first to try this revolutionary new saddle. Those selected are invited to try the saddle for a few months and share their feedback, which will be published on the Cambium website.The individuals selected will include men and women of differing body type and age, using a variety of bicycles, and importantly:-33 will be long-time users of Brooks Leather Saddles.-33 will be cyclists who have used both Brooks Leather Saddles and other saddles.-34 will be cyclists who have never used a Brooks Leather Saddle.Individuals who wish to register for consideration to be the first to try the Cambium may do so before 17th May at www.brooksengland.com/cambium.All registrants will receive a 10% discount to the Brooks online shop.
Just be sure to also submit a plaster cast of your scranus so Brooks can make sure they have all those differing body types covered.

As a Brooks convert I'm genuinely intrigued by this saddle, though I do have two (2) reservations, those being:

1) How do I know that the cow who was spared will use his reprieve responsibly and become a useful member of society? What if he just stands around scarfing hay, chewing his cud, and releasing more methane into the atmosphere for the rest of his life?

2) There had better be something to chamfer on this thing, or else Eric "The Chamferer" Murray is not going to be happy and someone's gonna get cut.

(He will cut you.)

By the way, I am astride Eric's handiwork today, and my scranus is singing songs of praise:

Say what you will about stem length, but I really need to admit to myself that I need a compact crank already.

Anyway, as I turned to go back down and stuffed copies of "Hustler" down my jersey to block the wind, I noticed an SUV full of doofuses in knee pads and full-face helments preparing to descend the hill on longboards:

This raised a number of questions for me, such as:

--Will they attain Fred "Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!" speed despite the lack of hydrolic breaks or indeed any brakes at all?

--With all that Fred traffic on the hill, some of whom zig-zag in a state of anaerobic delirium as they approach the top, how long before one of these Roller-doofuses collides head-on with one of the Freds and they all go flying into the Hudson?

I don't know the answer to any of these, but despite my lack of hydrolic breaks I descended very quickly, mostly because I was afraid of getting hit by a longboarder.

With that I shall bid you a-doo. Hopefully I will see some of you in our notion's capitol this weekend, but in any event I look forward to returning on Monday the 22nd with regular updates.

Will miss you tomorrow,Snob, but may actually get some work done if I'm not taking the quiz and reading the comments all afternoon.Make sure your credit card is working, mine got hacked into today as it does every six months. I'd like to spend 1300$ at Apple and 1500$ at Polo/Ralph Lauren but it wasn't me.

- Wonderland on 11th and Kenyon is a nice place to have a burger and a beer on a patio if it's nice.

- if you're there on Saturday, MtPleasant Farmer's Market has a volunteer bike clinic to help folks adjust their shifty bits and fill tires. I bet they'd get a kick out of having you make the brakes on someone's Magna marginally safer.

I'm going to try to make the Saturday Night DC Bike Space BRA thing. If I can wrangle myself a 1 day weekend. You will know me, I'll be the non-dashing one without any foppish finery, not drinking gin, and not enjoying any stompers. I'll be there soley for the Snob Blather, so I hope it is good.

I would like my Cambium with an organic hemp top please. Acre for Acre hemp produces much more textile fibre vs cotton. Hemp can also be replanted season after season in the same plot without depleting the soil of nutrients like cotton. George Washington and Thomas Jefferson were hemp farmers.

damn, had i not watched that musak video like 8 times i sooo like, totally would have been like, podium dude.

snob, when you rip us off by one whole day, can't you at least make up for it by posting something REALLY angry or REALLY awesome - like the Rob Fords-F350 dually slamming into a camera? that was pretty awesome yesterday.

by the way, for you New York City slicker types, a Ford F350 "dually" is a full sized pick up truck that is available with optional "Dual" rear wheels. the reference is apt given Snob's pluralization of Rob Fords due to his big fat obese ass.

here is one drag racing a mustang GT: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLWG4DyGwl4

Perhaps my favorite t-shirt is a D.C. homie XXXL Tall T from Obama's inauguration. The front has Obama dunking from the free throw line, in fine Jordan steez. He is rocking red white and blue Nike dunks, a 44 jersey, and a cape. McCain is in the background looking slackjawed. It says "THIS IS OUR MOMENT" in glitter letters.

On the back, Obama is ripping open his suit to show a superman costume underneath.

It's pretty awesome. Rednecks get a kick out of it. Black people get stoked. White people like Wishihadaset are confused: they like the pro-Obama sentiment, but find the imagery too stereotypical and racist. HOW CAN IT BE RACIST? I bought it from a black dood, and it's clearly intended for a black audience.

rct,Yes, took the bus. Even last night there was a fair amount of standing water as I rode home, so today must really be a mess. We got a little water in our basement, but more worrisome is the wet spot on the 2nd floor ceiling. I think I have a roof repairman in my future. Hope the rest of you are OK!

If Robs Fords were to have an impromptu football game at the top of Mt. Frederest, trip and fall when dropping back to pass (which seems typical for him) and start rolling down the hill, what would his 'Woo Hoo' speed be? Assuming he reached it before he rolled into the Hudson.

Stupid of Brookes. The *only* thing that keeps riders using these horrible uncomfortable saddles is the claim that there is only one way to make a saddle (eventually) comfortable, and that is by using rock-hard leather that only softens if you treat it right (so if your saddle isn't comfortable, and it isn't, then it's your fault). Once they admit there's another way the jig is up.

you are a confused individual. Yiddish is an inherently funny language. African click pop languages are the only funnier sounding dialects. In the PNW, people don't use the word "PUTZ". There is no jewish influence here. No putz, no chutzpah, no decent bagels, no muthafuckin' rye bread. Yes, there are a handful of people of jewish origin sprinkled around here and there, but they have no influence on the white bread culture here.

I was actually pretty excited to learn that Seattle has a jewish neighborhood, Wedgwood, as it is impossible to find rye bread around here.

I think a lot of east coast peeps views on PNW might be warped by Portlandia. That other chick from Sleater Kinney, Carrie Brownstein, is the star, and obviously hebrew. She is a perfect example of Jewish demographics in the U.S.A.http://www.ancestry.com/name-origin?surname=brownsteinNew York: 46% (167 of 362)WA: less than 1% (1 of 362)OR: less than 1% (2 of 362)

DB,I think we're only getting splashed today, not soaked. Didn't realize till I saw the news last night and papers this morning how bad things are in a lot of the city. I got off easy (and am watching snow - SNOW - blow past the window now).

1. The difference between Toronto Mayor Rob Ford and the Hindenburg is(a) one resembles a blimp.(b) one resembles a rigid airship.(c) one resembles a zeppelin.(d) one can’t be trusted with zeppoli.

2. The difference between Toronto Mayor Rob Ford and the crash of the Hindenburg is(a) one is a flaming disaster.(b) one has had no lasting effect on local cycling.(c) one is not responsible for the loss of life.(d) one of degree, not kind.

3. According to a NYC Appellate Court this week, if a dog causes a bicycle to crash in Central Park,(a) it’s the dog’s fault.(b) it’s the dog owner’s fault.(c) it’s the cyclist’s fault.(d) it’s nobody’s fault. Shit happens. Dog Case

4. Based on this court decision noted above, my dog(a) is more insufferable than ever.(b) only calls out “on your left” in French, Italian or Flemish.(c) Can’t wait for the 2013 NYC Spring Bicycle Racing Series.(d) all of the above.

5. The cycling ascent of N.J.’s Mount Frederest ends at a police station where one can(a) fill a water bottle.(b) use indoor plumbing.(c) confess to doping.(d) wonder how it was possible to become even slower than one once was.(e) all of the above.

On the factual matter concerning question 3, I confess that I might be too stupid to understand a legal judgement. Check that: I am too stupid. So despite reading the decision, I don't know whether or not the dog owner was at fault or whether it was a "shit happens" decision against the cyclist.

All I can say is that my brain tends to wilt when it (my brain) attempts to understand serial double negatives. Such as "denied defendant Julie Smith's (defendant) motion...dismissing the complaint as against her, reversed..."

And (even worse, caps added for emphasis) "certainly we would NOT find that NO NEGLIGENCE claim was available."

Perhaps your dog can enlighten me, grade my exam, or just pee all over it.

Ahhh....The summer of 1990. Worked at Adventureland in Farmingdale, and our musical soundtrack in the Fascination room that summer consisted of a highly eclectic mix of Beatles, Zappa, REM, Anthrax, and so much﻿ more......and of course this. Never even knew there was a video, but damn this brings back a shitload of fun memories.

My dog explained that the Court determined that one is only liable for the conduct of one's dog if one knew the dog was vicious. Running into a cyclist isn't vicious. Therefore, calling one's dog from across the road so he runs into a cyclist isn't negligence.

My dog also advised that the decision wouldn't get me off the hook for his behavior due to my whining when he elbowed me during a no drop group ride.

Babble you look like you would be so much fun to hang out with. I would like to fuck in the park. In the woods. In the butt. You could put the blanket in your basket. I could clean my junk off with it.

Leroy: your dog has a keen legal mind. Please thank him (her?) for parsing the decision. I just re-read it, and found myself once again confused by the example of the ball being tossed back and forth across the street and the cat falling out the window. There is clearly no place for me amongst the august membership of the Bar. Your dog, however....

last real ChamoisJuice post was about the lack of decent rye bread in Seattle...

I have been moving away from using one name, and going back to commenting as anon or Bob Roll or whatevs... I find it moderately entertaining how many other as

Babble, my preferred method of seducting honeys on bicyclettas is as follows:holler "do a poppa wheelie".Get a smile. Yell "do a skid, at least!"You stop, comment on how cute my dog is. Almost as cute as you are. AWSHUCKS. Compliment you on article of clothing, that peripherally props your fashion sense, but mostly your physique."You look thirsty. We should get a drink" etc, etc."Let's go dancing"etc, etc."Do you feel my boner?"ENTER THE BONEZONE!

@euro spondee - if I was to travel over to jolly old England I wouldn't have my guns on me so I would show the utmost respect to Eric the Chamferer. Now if he was visiting my house I would definitely stay between him and my silverware drawer.

Congrats to the fine citizens of Boston and the LE community for taking out the trash. Thoughts and prayers for those still suffering.

That's it. I finally nailed it down. That faint whiff of resemblance (a la early 80's cheap cocaine) of the Snob to Rainer Werner Fassbinder (confirmed in the promo video for the new book - Snob A broad.(something to do with crossdressing and bikes i think)(filmed in San Francisco;).

YO RCT I managed to land an Intense Uzzi suspension frame with a Thompson post on the EBAY for $227. Did I get hurt or do good? Its a 26est so I can just swap over all the components from the Dinosaur and get my plush on.

Yeah thats a bud said and it was BONUS because I would have had to buy a SADDLEpost anyway. Don't think my deruillereeraurrelrer clamp is big enough so I may just strip the 3 speed up front down to the middle chainring only and try some 1x7 action. After I get shelled on a few LBL climbs I will be ordering the proper clampage.

Another cyclist bites the dust. At 7 in the AM? On a Sunday? Out for a quick 40 miler with your pal?Read on:

"CARLSBAD, Calif. – A bicyclist was struck and killed by a vehicle while riding in Carlsbad, police said.

The bicyclist was struck by a northbound vehicle while headed north in the bike lane on El Camino Real north of La Costa with a fellow rider, according to the Carlsbad Police Department. Several people called 911 at about 7:40 a.m. to report the crash.

The bicyclist who was struck sustained a head injury and died at the scene, police said.

The bicyclist’s name was withheld pending family notification.

The Carlsbad Police Traffic Division has opened an investigation into the fatal crash.

Carlsbad police said the driver had not been cited or arrested, but the crash remained under investigation.

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!