Four Loko

As a Midwesterner, I was weaned on swill like Old Milwaukee, Milwaukee’s Best, and, harshest of all, Old Style. Heineken was considered exotic because it was imported, we toasted with Miller High Life (“The Champagne of Beers”) instead of real champagne, and I searched all over town for the Miller Lite throwback cans because I’m a sucker for beer nostalgia. As a younger man, I proudly chugged my inexpensive beer, sometimes swapping it out for a Newcastle or Guinness if I had a few extra dollars to spare, but usually drinking something a friend refereed to as “gut rot” more often than not. When you’re young, dumb, and looking for drunken fun, drinking crap is a badge of honor. You would rather do shots of Wild Turkey than sip a single malt, and while straight Kool-Aid mix and whatever liquor you have handy might not taste especially great, it usually did the trick.
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Good news, New Yorkers! We may have to suffer high rents, incessant snowstorms, and increasingly ridiculous commutes, but at least we still have Four Loko to drown our sorrows. Its magical combination of liquor and caffeine was recently banned, but The Awl noticed that an unnamed Brooklyn deli is still selling plenty of the newly caffeine-free beverage. So, what do we think is happening? Has the controversy driven the brand’s name recognition through the roof, are many Four Loko fans just too stupid to realize the caffeine is gone, or is it possible that some people actually just like the way it tastes?
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Today, Vice made us laugh on purpose. “Before deciding to pull their product from the market, the FDA offered the makers of 4LOKO a warning that they could choose to put on each can if they wanted to continue selling the product,” Bob Odenkirk writes. “We’ve obtained a mock-up of that government-approved warning.”… Read More

When New York decided to ban Four Loko back in November, we mourned the passing of the caffeinated malt beverage just like everyone else did. But evidently there are some people out there who are refusing to let go, using Four Loko “cover sleeves” — made out of actual cans — to make… Read More

1. Game on, Google: Goldman Sachs and Digital Sky Technologies have invested $500 million into Facebook in a deal that values the social network at $50 billion — which is more than eBay, Yahoo!, and Time Warner. [via Gawker]

2. Little Fockers took the New Year’s weekend box office, raking in over $26… Read More

1. Today marks the last day for retailers to get drink shipments of Four Loko, and after that, stores will have “a reasonable amount of time” to sell their inventory. It’s worth noting that cans are already selling for as much as $8 on Craigslist. Get rich quick scheme, anyone? [via NYDN]

Even for those of us who have great relationships with our family, Thanksgiving can be a rough time. First, there’s travel to worry about. Hosting and cooking can be a royal pain. And there’s always some other kind of miscellaneous disaster to contend with on top of the usual stuff. We all handle holiday stress differently, but for those (like SNL favorite Guy Fieri) who prefer to turn to drink, we’ve devised a booze-tastic four-course Thanksgiving dinner. That’s right: Every one of these recipes has liquor in it. Cook up these seasonal delights, keep a few bottles of wine on the table — and a flask of something stronger in your pocket — and you’ll be blissfully passed out in front of the football game in no time. Just do us a favor and wait a few hours before you try to drive home, will you?
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As Sparks heir and current cultural scapegoat Four Loko hurtles towards a nationwide ban, its fans and foes are becoming more obsessed with the caffeinated malt beverage with each passing day. While we at Flavorpill have no official position on the drink, we are thoroughly enjoying the many colorful tributes it has inspired — in the form of tattoos, rap songs, catchy slogans, viral videos, and one hilariously stodgy New York Times review. Enjoy the best of them (and, if you like, pour one out for old Four Loko), after the jump.
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