2. CBBC accidentally leaks cancelled kids' TV show

3. Jimi Hendrix haunts Isle of Wight Festival site….

'Paranormal experts' from Most Haunted have apparently been called to the island in the area around the singer's statue.

Potentially fictional islander Joe Heydon said: "The performance might only last a few minutes, but other nights it goes until dawn. It's not particularly scary, but after a few nights of no sleep, it does get frustrating."

9. Hulu shortens your favourite TV shows to under 15 seconds

10. Roku suggests snacks based on what you're watching

Are you watching Game of Thrones – how about some mutton and chicken wings? Or if you're midway through Vampire Diaries, you might want some garlic fries. Forget that this is all pretence – now we're just hungry.

11. George Osborne is now a fashion designer

According to The Guardian, former chancellor George Osborne is launching his own fashion line called 'Georgio', which will design "high-quality, hi-visibility industrial garments aimed at the multitasking CEO". Shame we're strapped for cash/it's a joke.

12. George Osborne is now the new artistic director of Shakespeare's Globe

13. Amazon launches Petlexa

"The Petlexa feature allows dogs, cats, and other animals to communicate with Alexa just like you do. The Petlexa feature gives pets the freedom to place orders from Amazon, and to activate smart home-enabled toys." Sure it does, Amazon.

14. T-Mobile makes a full-body wearable

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Time to throw out those smartwatches, as T-Mobile is launching the ONEsie – the first ever full-body wearable. Can we get one in size XXL?

15. Google Gnome makes your yard smart

16. Lickable menus to help you make up your mind

Flaming Grill pubs have designed a 'scratch and lick' menu, which includes barbecue marinated double dipped steak, five flavour frickin' chicken skewers and the Mother Clucker sandwich.

Obviously this is all a big joke, but if it wasn't the pubs have even come up with a specially-created Sani-Safe coating, meaning menus are free from germs within five seconds of being licked.

17. Snickers launches fresh new range of knickers – SKNICKERS

Check out the new underwear range "from the company that really knows nuts". And enjoy the model at the end who wouldn't put his nuts in anything else.

18. Corrie records new version of theme tune with cast singing the lyrics

Behind the scenes footage shows Faye Brookes, Cath Tyldesley and Shayne Ward recording the new theme tune – and they're thrilled to be part of such a historic (and obviously fake) moment in the soap's 56-year history.

19. There's a new ITV show called Chastity Island

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Move over Love Island, there's finally a show for prudes as ITV introduces "eight weeks of sun, sea and celibacy as 16 sexy singles attempt to find true love with just one rule – look but don't touch".