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Daily Archives: March 16, 2012

In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, I felt like this would be a good time to show some love to our Catholic friends. Afterall, they have such a rich history of…well, history. I’m really not one who likes to bring up the past and I’m usually pretty forgiving so I can overlook stuff like the Crusades, the Inquisition, the killing of Native Americans, the burning of witches and the purchase of indulgences. I mean, if you can’t forgive all that then what kind of person are you?

This kind.

But despite all the suffering and torment some Catholics caused, they actually churned out some pretty good guys. Saints, even.

#7: Bernard of Clairvaux (St. Bernard)

Patron Saint: Beekeeping

Best Known For: his sweet Tim Tebow haircut and having a dog named after him

#6: St. Valentine

Patron Saint: Stupid Holidays

Best Known For: weird 2nd grade Valentine’s parties

“Hey Jeremy, will you be mine?”

#5: St. Dominic

Patron Saint: Sweet Vacations

Best Known For: having his followers colonize and found the Dominican Republic so one day lots of Hall of Fame baseball players could be born there

#4: Drew Brees

Patron Saint: Touchdowns

Best Known For: being a Fantasy Football Stud

#3: St. Thomas Aquinas

Patron Saint: Academics

Best Known For: having a high school in Florida named after him

#2: St. Nicholas

Patron Saint: Pawnbrokers

Best Known For: being Santa Claus

#1: Erasmus of Formiae (St. Elmo)

Patron Saint: Intestinal Disease

Best Known For: starting some fire and not having enough sense to extinguish it before some bad 80’s movie broke out