Olsen insists that, considering her "army"-like upbringing, packed with travel, appointments, and outfits, she's "surprised" she didn't end up like Spears -- instead maturing into a highly competent designer and fashion icon.

But the most painful passage to read (if you're as insanely jealous of the girls' closets as we are) is the one where she describes the myriad instances in which the twins ripped and tore clothing to make it fit their Lilliputian frames. "'The amount of beautiful things we've ruined—not having the patience for a tailor and cutting everything ourselves … My sister once took an Alaïa dress of mine and just cut the whole thing, and then she was like, "I cut it too short."'"

Her own line, however, seems more destruction-free: Olsen describes them as "high-end basics" -- blazers, T-shirts, sweaters, and other things you'd think of only paying $100 for, until someone in a luxury boutique offers one to you for $400. Sigh. Fashion's rough sometimes.