McGee: Anyone lose a llama?

June 22, 2013

I encountered a llama in an open field the other day. Actually it was the local industrial park.
I knew it didn’t belong there.
I stopped my bicycle.
This made the llama prance a bit.
I’m glad that’s all it did. Llamas and their kin are known to spit at people.
“Well what are you doing here?” I asked the llama. “Do you have any water out there?”
It didn’t say anything. It just reared back on its hind legs.
I called the sheriff’s office. Surely they knew what to do with a stray llama.
The next morning the llama was on down the road a bit on some private property.
“How’d you get down here?” I asked the llama. “Do you have any water out there?”
It turned and looked at me then went back to grazing.
Apparently the sheriff’s department couldn’t do a thing because the llama had wandered on to private property.
I called animal control.
Animal control apparently couldn’t do anything because the llama was outside their territory. They’d need a call from the sheriff’s department.
After the call I held the phone in my hand and pondered the rules that keep folks from just doing the right thing.
I called the property owner.
“Naw, we don’t have a llama,” said the lady on the other end. “You catch it, you can keep it.”
“Tie it to your bicycle and lead it home,” said The Lady of the House. “A llama in the backyard might be fun.”
“I don’t think animal control would like that much,” I said.
The next day the llama was in a corral and had water. A nearby homeowner saw the critter across the highway and decided it needed to be kept safe.
“Glad you’re okay,” I yelled at the llama.
It turned its head, looked at me and went back to grazing.
After all, all I really cared about was that it got some water.

Grant McGee is a long-time broadcaster and former truck driver who rides bicycles and likes to talk about his many adventures on the road of life. Contact him at: bikedude@plateautel.net