Supernatural: I do a lot of cardio

Yeah. No idea what happened in this episode. I just hit pause and stayed there. (The CW)

THEN: “A prince rides inside me. The Stallion Who Mounts The World. The Stallion is the Khal of Khals. And he shall be called Rhaego!”

KHALEEEEEEEEEESSSIIIIIIII!

“Check this out. Jogger in Minneapolis gets his heart ripped out!” This is why I don’t run. Sam confirms that Dean is speaking literally. “Only way that interests me.” He’s like a kid on Christmas morning with this case. “Two hearts ganked. Same city, six months apart. I mean, that’s gotta be a ritual, man.”

“Or at least, some sort of a heart-sucking possessed Satanic crackwhore bat.”

Now Dean is just giddy. Also, totally the name of my new band. He’s ready to “hang out the shingle again and ride.” Sam reminds him they’re already on a case. The Kevin and the amazing demon tablet case. Heart guy can take a number. Dean seems to have changed his tune a bit where Kevin is concerned. They’ve been chasing dust for a week and where are they? Wherever they’ve been, they didn’t pack enough SPF. These boys are tan. You might want to dial it down with the bronzer makeup department. Moving on. Dean finally looks up from his phone. He seems slightly horrified. No seriously, where are they?

“Farmer’s Market. Organic.”

Dean looks at Sam like the apple he’s been munching on is possessed or spelled by some sort of vile sorcery. So, Sam was getting his farm-to-table on while avoiding doing what they do.

“Wow, Dean. Does it make you feel that much better every time you say it?”

“Look man, I get it. You took a year off to do yoga and play the lute. Whatever. But I’m back! We’re back! Which means we walk and kill monsters at the same time. We’ll find Kevin. But in the meantime, do we ignore stuff like this or are innocent people supposed to die so you can shop for produce?”

The boys head to Minneapolis and talk to the lead detective – played by Jensen Ackles’ father Alan Ackles. Yay! Papa Ackles! The jogger’s body wasn’t mutilated, he wasn’t robbed, and he had no local connections. Park surveillance of the trail showed another runner, Paul Hayes, passing the victim. They questioned him and have no reason to consider him a suspect. “What, you mean he didn’t fall to his knees and confess to gutting the guy?” I don’t think Detective Jensen’s Dad likes your tone, Dean.

“No, I mean we did a thorough check of the guy. Not so much as a parking ticket came up. I mean, look at him. *scoff* Sure, he can run a little bit, but Thor he ain’t. [That's because Sam is Thor.] You think he’s gonna grab Freddy Fitness here, and throw him down and rip out his heart? I don’t think so. Forgive me if I didn’t take him out back and shoot him!”

Detective Jensen’s Dad stares down Dean and it’s just a little slice of heaven to watch the two of them together.

They pursue their own line of inquiry with Paul. He seems quite the fitness enthusiast. There’s a treadmill and heavy bag in his living room, posters of Ahnuld from his youthful Pumping Iron days on the walls, and an industrial strength blender for mixing up vile grey-green health shakes. I bet there’s some coconut water in there. While Sam revisits Paul’s story, Dean checks out the bathroom for hex bags and such. He apologizes for being in there so long. “Too much fiber.“ Paul tells him there’s no such thing. Sam turns and Lance Armstrongs at his brother. “See.” The dude is drinking a concoction that looks like a leprechaun threw up in a glass. You are not winning this argument, Sam.

They repair to a coffee shop to … I’m not really sure what they’re doing because I’m so very distracted by all the close-up shots of Jensen’s face. I’m not kidding. It was at least the second watch, maybe the third, before I realized the next scene involved a totally different murder. And it’s kind of funny, considering Jensen directed this episode. Let’s just call it a gift to the fans. My teevee boyfriend is nothing if not a giver. Anyhoo, the boys compare notes and Dean discovers a second “do it yourself heart bypass” in Ames, Iowa two days after their cardiac grab. They get the details from Jimmy Novak’s possessed neighbor Roger. Arthur Swenson, a 20-year veteran of the police force, ordered a pizza and ripped the delivery driver’s heart out. Those 30 minute or less guarantees are no joke. Questioning Arthur proves less than illuminating. He worries his hands while repeating Mama-say mama-sah ma-ma-coo-sah over and over again.

As the boys try to make sense of Arthur’s rambling using Dean’s new translation app (welcome to smart phones, buddy), “Agent Sambora” gets a call. Arthur is in the hospital after gouging out his own eye. He broke off part of his bed frame and used it as a knife, severing the optic nerve. Dean comments on Arthur’s different colored eyes. The attending, Dr. Kashi, tells him Arthur underwent a transplant almost exactly a year prior. That’s the eye he cut out. Dean asks if it’s possible to trace the donor of a transplanted organ. Dr. Kashi tells him it’s difficult … but for the face of the sun, possible. Can I get a bam chicka? I like Dr. Kashi. She can stay. After confirming that Paul Hayes is also a transplant recipient, the boys motor to Boulder, Colorado. If the pattern holds, that’s where the next “heart attack” will occur. They drive through the night and Dean could not be happier. The last year has given him a new perspective. “I know where I’m at my best. And that is right here, driving down Crazy Street, next to you.”

“Or. Maybe you don’t need me.”

Pardon? “Maybe you’re at your best hacking and slicing your way through all the world’s krep alone. Not having to explain yourself to anybody.” Right. Because when has working alone ever worked out? Have you forgotten the whole “we keep each other human” speech from “The End”, Sam? Dean hasn’t. He reminds Sam that he doesn’t exactly have another brother he can talk to about The Life and The Job. Well, I mean, he does have another brother, but Adam doesn’t call much anymore … Cell reception is spotty in the Cage. Sam’s not bailing – yet – he just wants something different for his life and he needs Dean to make room for that. Sam wants his time to count for something. Ooh, burn! He’s saved by the bell when Dr. Kashi calls with her search results. Paul and Arthur are only two of eight patients who all received organs from legendary All-Pro QB Brick Holmes. That sounds like a p0rn name.

None of the other recipients are from Boulder, but it’s where Brick made his home. One patient has recently moved there, and she’s really into Game of Thrones cosplay.

The boys interview Brick’s mother, but she’s reluctant to talk. She doesn’t reveal much about his life prior to the accident. There were no unusual changes. No new people in his life. “No new interests? Fly fishing. Stamp collecting. The occult?” Hah! No? Okay, then. They catch a break from the Mayor of Sunnydale. He identifies Arthur Swenson’s crazy talk as a prayer to Cacao, the god of what we call corn and the Mayans called maize. Dean’s not entirely sold on the theory that they’re dealing with a Mayan god, but time is against them. Someone in Phoenix is about to die. Dean has already emailed local law, but no one has seen Jimmy Tang, potential heart ripper, in days. There’s a second missive in the in box. This one is for Sam, answering his questions about college admissions. Sam comes over all squirrelly. He’s not talking about hanging it up. He’s just exploring his options. Dean’s reaction is surprisingly muted and Sam readily takes advantage of it to steer the conversation back to the case at hand. Dean plays along. “Nice job on changing the subject, though.”

They slip into the Holmes home while Momma Eleanor is out for the evening. They start with the master bedroom, each taking a closet. Dean begins mentally calculating what Brick’s clothes would go for on Ebay. Sam realizes he’s in Eleanor’s closet. Maybe she moved into her son’s room after he died. Or … Dean looks pointedly at the king sized bed. Sam kind of wishes he was still Lucifer crazy. The mental images would be less upsetting. Dean shrugs it off. He clearly spends too much time in certain corners of the fandom. He goes back into the closet and discovers a panel in the wall. “That’s what I’m talking about.” He unlocks the door to a hidden trophy room. It’s a treasure trove of memorabilia from a variety of sports, not just football. “Baseball, boxing, race car driving … cricket mallet [Bat, Sammy. It's a bat.], golf clubs, a kendo sword, archery equipment.” Dean finds a worn cardboard box full of letters. They’re all the same. Addressed to a woman called Betsy, and spanning multiple years and sports. They’re all signed, “Love, Me.” Sam finds one that looks more recent. The tone of the letter is weary. “Dearest Betsy, So tired of it all, this continual parade of games and of meaningless competition. Always changing, always moving, not a still moment in the flow of eternity. I want to be still with you in eternity. Yet you cannot help but change with time.”

They pack up all the papers and haul them back to the motel. Sam does a search of the names from the trophies, and pulls up photos of Brick Holmes, race car driver Charlie Kearns, baseballer Davy Samuelson, and boxer Kelly Durand. They are all horribly photoshopped images of the same guy. The boxer shot is my favorite, given its close resemblance to the Nic Cage as Tobias Funke shop. So, how did the same guy manage to stay young and sustain a sporting career for almost 70 years? Dean may have found an answer in John’s demonic dayplanner. According to it, Mayan athletes were treated like kings. They made sacrifices to Cacao by killing a victim, pulling out his heart, and eating it. “They believed the rituals gave them super charged power over their opponents.” Maybe Brick made a deal with Cacao to stay young and strong as long as the sacrifices kept coming. Sam takes the theory one step further. Whatever mojo powered the spell may have gone along for the ride with Brick’s organs, compelling the recipients to keep carrying out the ritual. If you like the results, you keep making the sacrifices. If you’re a dedicated cop like Arthur, you poke yourself in the eye with a sharp piece of metal.

“Brick Holmes. A heart eater. Who knew.”

Eleanor, apparently.

“At least he wasn’t sleeping with his mother.”

“Yeah, good Sam. Find the silver lining.”

Sam turns the laptop around to show another Frankenshop of “Kelly Durand” with his wife Betsy. When they tell Eleanor about the murders, she tells the boys everything. She thought when Brick died it would all be over. He was a 1,000 year old Mayan athlete “who never wanted his days in the sun to end.” He was Kelly Durand when Eleanor met him. She didn’t learn the truth until she started to age and her husband didn’t. They were in love and so she chose to ignore the biannual heart reapings. She also accepted his cycle of reemergence. Every ten years, a new look and new name. She was his wife until her 40′s when she became his ‘mother’. “I am so tired. You can’t imagine the burden of it all.” Brick could see that Eleanor was reaching the end of her life. After centuries alone he couldn’t bear the thought of life without her. “That’s why he drove off that bridge.” That’s her story. They must think she’s a monster.

“No. Just that you married one.”

And PS, that one is now eight. Eleanor keeps the math simple for them. “Brick used to say the heart was key. That was the focus of the sacrifice.” The current owner of his heart, Randa, should be getting ready for her shift at the Bunny Hole. “Really? Our King-daddy monster is a stripper?” Dean lock picks in through the side door. “Smell that?” Stale beer, broken dreams, and daddy issues? It’s not her fault her father Gene ran off. Randa is waiting for them. So is Paul Hayes and Jimmy Tang. Paul tosses Sam and his King-daddy killing knife across the room while Jimmy flips Dean into the air and onto the stage on his back. The two men pin him like a very hot bug. “You guys are stronger than you look.”

“Comes with the package. Plus, I work out a lot.”

Heh. I kind of like Paul. Randa plants a stilettoed foot on Dean’s diaphragm and begins her evil monologue. He can’t imagine who she was. Just a shy, awkward little thing from Georgia. Then she had the surgery. “I became freaking Xena warrior princess.” YI-YI-YI-YI! She straddles Dean’s waist and leans on his chest. I’m sure this actress was heartbroken when she got her call sheet and saw how she was going to be spending her day. Randa strokes Dean’s cheek. She couldn’t dissect a frog in high school. “But sacrificing to Cacao? Better than sex.” She pulls open Dean’s overshirt and traces her finger down his chest. She does not rip open his t-shirt. DAMMIT, ACKLES! I take back what I said. You are no giver, sir! “If I go real slow and take my time and enjoy this … I can actually show you your own beating heart before you die.” Also, if she goes real slow it gives Sam time to wake up from his floor nap and smash a bottle over Paul’s head. The brief distraction while they struggle is all the opportunity Dean needs to reach down for the knife that … well, I’m not entirely sure where the knife came from. It just sort of magically appeared out of his pocket. It’s like in the Highlander show when 6-foot long swords would just materialize out of thin air. Is Dean a Highlander? There can be only one. Anyhoodle, he stabs Randa in the chest with the magic materializing knife. Flames ignite at the point of entry and her eyes begin to glow. She stands and slowly backs away from the edge of the stage as the power of Cacao burns out inside her. When her heart stops beating the spell is finally broken.

“Back in business! Got the win. Admit it. Feels good, huh?” Sam admits nothing. Dean seems to have found the clarity again in hunting that he hasn’t had since John died. Sam gets it, but he doesn’t feel the same way. Not anymore. Maybe he never did. “When this is over … when we close up shop on Kevin and the tablet … ”

“I’m done. I mean that.”

“Dean, the year that I took off, I had something I’ve never had. A normal life. I got to see what that felt like. I want that. I had that …”

A part of Dean gets it. He’s always wanted that for Sam too. But the bigger part of him that can’t imagine being alone shuts it down. He condescends that it’s just how Sam feels now. He shakes his head at the very idea. Sam shuts down a little, too. He stares off into the night, remembering a day with a girl and a birthday cake. How it was the most normal, perfect day of his life. And how he wants nothing more than to have it all back.

———-

I’m sort of *meh* on this episode. I’m not sure if that’s the actual epi or my slight bias again the writers, Buckner and Ross-Leming. *cough* Racist truck *cough* Although they did come up with some great lines, I will give them that. Dean struck me as a little manic at points. It reminded me of the Dean from “Sin City” with a soupcon of “listen to her purr” Dean from “Bloodlust”. Which is understandable. In both of those instances, the ground was shifting under his feet and he was doing his best to keep up. Dean has found his purpose and fire again but the world he came back to isn’t as simple and pure as Purgatory. I’m also struck by how much Dean sounds like John with his heroic pronouncements that people are dying! They’re dying, Sammy! And Team Winchester are the only ones who can save them. Compare that to the moment in the Jinn!verse in front of John’s grave when Dean finally dared to ask why.

Dean riding Sam for not hunting echoes his Season 1 struggle with reconciling the Life with the Normal that Sam wanted so badly. And there have certainly been points along that way that he’s been sympathetic to it. Offering that they can stay in “Hook Man” (it was on TNT last week, so) and asking Sam if he would turn back the clock in “Wishful Thinking”. I want to believe that Dean still wants Sam to be happy on his own terms, but Dean’s fears hold him back. I think he knows how selfish it would be to ask Sam to keep hunting for his sake, so instead he falls back on guilt – if not them, who?

Sam telling Dean he’ll be fine on his own was like a punch in the gut. But Sam has to sense that, to compensate for how hard Dean is holding on, he has to push back with equal force. I was hoping we’d get a lot more of the Sam and Amelia back story in this episode, but I’ve come to like Sam’s single hazy, golden memory. It’s such a simple thing but it’s the dream come to life for Sam. Everything he’s imagined “normal” life would be. It’s also an ironic callback to Dean’s picnic with Lisa from “Dream a Little Dream of Me”.

I do appreciate that this season seems to have found a nice balance between the tension of wanting different lives and the connection of still just being brothers. Compare it to Seasons 4 and 5 when there was such an undercurrent of mistrust. The boys may be at odds but they respect each other, even if they don’t agree with each other.

One Response

I’ve found the Sam memories off putting because they feel so … weird. And when I read this line, his “single hazy, golden memory,” it got me wondering if the reveal at the end of this season will be that Sam’s past year of bliss was all a dream? hallucination? or some long demon con?

Something like, Dean will finally let Sam go be happy but it’ll all turn out to be some devil trap.