PITTSBURGH (AP) -- Dude, listen to this. A language professor in Pittsburgh has published a paper deconstructing and decoding the word "dude," saying it's a lot more than a term for surfers and skaters. Scott Kiesling says the one-syllable word can be used as a greeting, as in "What's up, Dude?" or for sympathy: "Dude, I'm so sorry." The word also can be used on its own for surprise or disgust. The professor says the word can be powerful, allowing people to connect in a way that isn't too intimate. And he says its use is spreading. While "dude" was once reserved for talk between guys, Kiesling says women are using it, too. But he points to a new potential problem. Kiesling says one of his students insists "dude" is no longer cool because it's been in an academic study.

---------------------------Like, wow, dude. Like we didn't already know the many uses of the word 'dude'.

10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath even if they don't, and then punch them in the face.

9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everyone gives you the sympathy remarks, tell everyone you were kidding and call them a bunch of queers.

8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. In the meeting pretend you're hocking up a loogie, spit it into a glass and hand it to the person next to you and say "BEAT THAT!"

7. Inform a male co-worker that he would make a good hooker, then piss in his coffee and tell him he needs a good ass *******.

6. Always walk around with a big smile and keep one hand down the front of your pants.

5. Answer every question with " ****** if I know...", then call the person a racial slur that doesn't even match their race.

4. Brag about the fact that you carry a gun, and keep playing with your nuts. Get them really sweaty and go around shaking everyone's hand.

3. Run down the hall with your dick out spraying piss everywhere yelling "It wont stop! God help me it wont stop!" Then when it does, look down and say, "Oh! I must have broke it."

2. Ask to borrow a co-worker's expensive pen. Bring it to the bathroom and stick it up your ass. Return it to the person and tell them that it smells bad and tell them to smell it. When they say that it smells, say "It should, I had it up my ass!"

1. **** on your office floor and when someone comes in and sees it tell them it's the fake rubber kind. When they try to pick it up and realize that their hand is full of real **** - - laugh and embarrass him in front of everyone.