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Cuchumber

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland. She found herself seated next to a nice priest whom she asked:

"Excuse me Father, could I ask a favor?"

"Of course my child, What can I do for you?"

"Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated vibrating hair remover for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone over the declaration limits and I am worried that they will confiscate it at customs. Do you think you could hide it under your cas sock?"

"Of course I could, my child, but you must realize that I cannot lie."

"You have such an honest face Father, I am sure they will not ask you any questions", and she gave him the 'hair remover'.The aircraft arrived at its destination. When the priest presented himself to customs he was asked,

"Father, do you have anything to declare?"

"From the top of my head to my sash, I have nothing to declare, my son", he replied.

Finding his reply strange, the customs officer asked, "And from the sash down, what do you have?"

The priest replied, "I have there a marvelous little instrument destined for use by women, but which has never been used."

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful
flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's
carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very
beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

"Old Miss" America is the first black female president ever. She's from Tupelo and weighs over 350 lbs. which appeals to the average voter who is already obese right now. In another 10 years super obese.

A company, feeling it was time for a shake-up, hires a new CEO. This new boss is determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO notices a guy leaning on a wall. The room is full of workers and he wants to let them know he means business!

The CEO walks up to the guy and asks, "And how much money do you make a week?"

A little surprised, the young fellow looks at him and replies, "I make $300.00 a week. Why?"

The CEO then hands the guy $1,200 in cash and screams, "Here's four weeks pay, now GET OUT and don't come back!"

Feeling pretty good about his first firing, the CEO looks around the room and asks, "Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-off was doing here?"

With a sheepish grin, one of the other workers mutters, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's.

A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital.
"How are you grandpa? he asks.

"Feeling fine," says the old man.

"What's the food like?"

"Terrific, wonderful menus."

"And the nursing?"

"Just couldn't be better. These young nurses really take care of you."

"What about sleeping? Do you sleep OK?"

"No problem at all nine hours solid every night. At 10 o'clock they bring me a cup of hot chocolate and a Viagra tablet ... and that's it. I go out like a light."

The grandson is puzzled and a little alarmed by this, so rushes off to question the nurse in charge.

"What are you people doing," he says, "I'm told you're giving an 85-year-old Viagra on a daily basis. Surely that can't be true?"

"Oh, yes," replies the nurse. "Every night at 10 o'clock we give him a cup of chocolate and a Viagra tablet. It works wonderfully well. The chocolate makes him sleep, and the Viagra stops him from rolling out of bed."

A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive, blonde, female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, looked inside, slammed it shut, and stormed back into her house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, again opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came again. She marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her,
"Is something wrong?"

To which she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps telling me I have mail!"

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Look at this:
This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

Sarah Palin should leave the field to those who are in possession of genuine political aspirations, and she should refrain from treating the Republican party as if it were a little more than a convenient vehicle for her private ambition.

If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and
while you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then
put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word
itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words
"mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and
that's why so is mankind.

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

Patient, "My farts do not stink and you can't hear them. It's just that I fart all the time. Look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five times. You didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you?"

"Hmm," says the Doctor,

He picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.

The patient is thrilled "Great doc. This prescription, will it really clear up my farts?"

"No," sighs the Doctor, "The prescription is to clear your sinuses. Next week I want you back here for a hearing test."

The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of
the watering hole and started to drink. But then he looked around
and saw skulls and bones everywhere. "Uh-oh," he thought. "This
watering hole is reserved for skeletons."

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Hey! If you believe that Adam actually cares about India, you'll believe this!

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally
swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no
ill effects, so he forgot about it.
Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions,
undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he
looked up the man's a$$ was that eye staring right back at him.
"You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are crossing an enchanted bridge in Magical Fairyland when they run into a fairy. The fairy says that they can be granted a transformation if they jump off the bridge and call out their wish. The brunette immediately jumps off the bridge and yells "Eagle!" She turns into a beautiful bird of prey and flies away. The redhead jumps off the bridge and yells out "Salmon!" She turns into a gorgeous shimmering salmon and swims upstream to spawn. The blonde is at this point so excited that she jumps off the bridge without thinking of her wish. She panics.
"Crap!"

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

An old lady sits on her front porch, rocking away the last days of her long life, when all of a sudden, a fairy godmother appears and informs her that she will be granted three wishes.
"Well, now," says the old lady, "I guess I would like to be really rich."
*** POOF *** Her rocking chair turns to solid gold.
"And, gee, I guess I wouldn't mind being a young, beautiful princess."
*** POOF *** She turns into a beautiful young woman.
"Your third wish?" asks the fairy godmother. Just then the old woman's cat wanders across the porch in front of them. "Ooh – can you change him into a handsome prince?" she asks.
*** POOF ***
There before her stands a young man more handsome than anyone could possibly imagine. She stares at him, smitten. With a smile that makes her knees weak, he saunters across the porch and whispers in her ear, "Bet you're sorry you had me neutered."

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Wow!!! So many freedom fighting outfits in India. WOW!!!
Hinddooos must be pulling their usual "suppress the minorities routine" on them. After all the protesting, they took matters in their own hands. So there we have it.

Stupid Adam and his pretending to care about I dis as a converted Jew Roman Catholic.

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known
versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at
line 232, as will be seen:
KING…’Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin,
And you the judges, bear a wary eye
Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations
HAMLET: Come on, sir.
LAERTES: Come, my lord.
Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY
DAPHNE: Wait!
SHAGGY: Stop the fight!
HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils
KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?
FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait.
For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth
Behind the strange events of latter days.
VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls,
Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk.
Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death,
And perforce hath been buried in the ground,
‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost
To carry mud upon his spectral boots.
Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound
Espy, with footprints leading to a drop.
This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost…
Until, when I did seek for other answers,
I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black
Discarded in the moat of Elsinore.
‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall
While darkness rendered him invisible.
FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.
KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother
In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.
FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern-
KING: My brother’s ghost!
HAMLET: My father!
VELMA: Nay, his image.
FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye
When he went to confront his lady mother.
Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius.
For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall
Behind the rent made in the tapestry.
Polonius was murdered by another.
The knife which killed him entered from behind.
LAERTES: But who?
FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.
HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air,
Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?
The GHOST enters.
GHOST: Indeed, my son.
SHAGGY: Zoinks!
DAPHNE: Jenkies!
GHOST: Mark them not.
Thou hast neglected duty far too long.
Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed?
Must I remain forever unavenged?
SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward,
runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around
the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.
GHOST: What?
FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost,”
That we may reach the bottom of the matter.
Now let us see who truly walked tonight.
FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.
ALL: Tis Fortinbras!
FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!
FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all!
This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death,
And cost me all my rightful heritage.
And so I killed this king, and hoped his son
Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown.
Then Claudius bethought himself the killer
(As if one might be poisoned through the ear!)
The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne,
And held to Norway with a tighter grip.
I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house.
I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes.
Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes.
This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died,
And Denmark might have come to me as well
As my beloved Norway and revenge.
My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog
But for these medd’ling kids and this their dog.
KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go.
For much remains to us to be discussed.
And suitable reward must needs be found
For these, our young detectives and their hound.
EXEUNT OMNES.

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