“I’m smarter than I look,” Paul said while we were having a beer after work. The other two people at the table didn’t seem surprised by this statement, but I was and it must have shown all over my face. My eyes and eyebrows felt like they shifted up a bit on my head wormlike.

Paul doesn’t look dumb, so I assumed he meant he is pretty smart or at least he thinks he is. He is. It is a widely agreed to fact at work. He knows everything, and I mean everything, about how government works. Legislation, regulations, committees, who is who now and who was who back in 1986, and everything in between. Ask him anything and he always knows. He’s never wrong. « Read the rest of this entry »

We were half an hour into the meeting when someone asked, “What’s the objective of this meeting?” We had been taking about the rumour that there might be a department reorganization instead.

I had called the meeting, but I sincerely could not remember anymore why. It must have been important because Paul was there and he was usually only called in on an emergency basis to deal with crises that required problem solving, something he excelled at. His time was precious and had to be called on only sparingly, on an as needed basis. « Read the rest of this entry »

I was really angry this time, but it was more than anger. And I was right. So very right.

It was rage, I was enraged in a way that was blinding and enlightening at the same time, because it seemed so obvious that I was right and everyone else was wrong. My rage was justified and my mind was clear as crystal, sharp as a tack. There was nothing else but it and me, and together we became a beautiful bubble of righteousness that nothing in this world could destroy. Like radioactive superheroes or mole men, my rage and I would last forever, our bond made stronger by a desire for ruthless and sweet revenge.

It had become apparent in the last five minutes that everyone else was a jerk. They didn’t listen to me, making them double, nay triple jerks, assholes really. « Read the rest of this entry »

Maybe I’m taking it too hard. I am thin skinned after all. In every sense because my skin turns bright red if I am embarrassed or flustered or if it is touched only a few times. Or maybe I am right and even some hard ass black belt Navy Seal type would consider this a really shitty day. I just don’t know what it was objectively, but I do know that emotionally it was devastating. « Read the rest of this entry »