We'll start off with Bobby Kristina who apparently is marrying her brotherWhitney Houston’s drug dealer. Cause you Know, errrthang that The Enquirer says is a FACT. Meanwhile back at the ranch, Bobby Brown is laughing all the way to the bank while planning a secret TELL ALL, ah, family values 101.

US Weekly confirms that Reese Witherspoon isn’t fat, but pregnant with her HOTTIE husband Jim Toth’s bey beh. We actually pretty much know this news is LEGIT and are sooo happy for the couple! Kate Hudson continues to look like she never had a baby, and The Bachelor gets a rookie! (who STILL watches this stuff?!)

Remember how baffled we were when Lindsay Lohan somehow slithered her way into the J. Edgar premiere's after-party at the Hotel Roosevelt?

Well, apparently we weren't alone - because she wasn't supposed to be there, and her desperation to get back into the industry's good graces not only caused a scene, but made the real A-listers in attendance uncomfortable!

One may have thought that after two stints in rehab, a jail sentence, an assault investigation, a stolen necklace, and 35 days under house arrest all in one year, Lindsay Lohan may try and amend the lifestyle choices that led her down to trouble town…but as we all know, hard-pAArtying actress does what she wants, and on her first night of freedom, she

Less than a week after Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to three years of probation and psychological counseling for misdemeanor grand theft, the troubled actress was reportedly caught drinking AGAIN at a nightclub on Saturday night, which ultimately led to an altercation with a camera-happy fan!

According to an eyewitness who asked to not be identified, he and three fans sat at a table next to LiLo at the Paul & Andre Hollywood club where they observed her taking multiple shots with her friends!

However, when they tried to take a picture, someone in the hard-pAArtying actress' entourage grabbed the camera and threw it in a bucket of ice!

The source reveals:

“We didn’t press charges because we thought it was funny at first. We all were drunk. But then we figured out when we got home that the camera was broken because water seeped in. The memory card, though, was still good. Lindsay appeared to be ‘belligerently drunk.' She and her people were doing shots of something all night. She looked like she was falling all over the place. She was being stupid. When she grabbed my friend’s wrist, another woman who was with Lindsay grabbed the camera. She kept saying ‘I need that camera’ over and over again. So the woman got it and sunk it into the ice bucket. We were sorta leaving and we didn’t want to cause any more trouble.”

And, like clockwork, her new publicist, Steve Honig responded by saying:

"I don't have any knowledge of this alleged incident whatsoever."

Ha! Well, of course NOT, would he?!

Sounds to us like someone didn't want the world to know that this brand new, remorseful and repentant La Lohan was about as convincing as her performance in I Know Who Killed Me!

Such a shame, we really wanted to see her clean up her act.

Fingers crossed that this is all a vicious lie, gurl! Time to grow up - and OWN up!

Although Christina Aguilera was pretty much put through the ringer when she was arrested early this morning for public intoxication - meaning she was booked, finger printed, mugshot photographed and held behind bars while she was wrung out to dry - authorities are now confirming that she will NOT be prosecuted with any crime!

According to Sheriff's department spokesperson Steve Whitmore, the singer, who was released from jail and driven home by a friend around 7am, will have her misdemeanor public intoxication on record, but she will not be charged with anything else.

However, no such luck for boy toy Matt Rutler, who blew a .09 - .01 over the legal limit - and is facing DUI charges. He was released later on this morning after his $5,000 bail was posted.

Not good.

It could have been a lot worse, but we seriously hope that this is the wake up call she clearly needs.

While rumors have persisted for the last few months that Christina Aguilera is heading toward a meltdown of epic proportions - in light of her divorce, film and album flops, a shady new man and increasingly erratic behavior - and now, sources have once again come forward to reveal that her crazy is only worsening!

The insider reveals that the singer has begun to alienate her friends, ignore her SON, and even had sex with boytoy Matt Rutler in the bathroom during a recent family party!

They explain:

"Aguilera flipped out on her mother, Shelly Kearns. Christina was so wasted before guests arrived that her mother told her to lie down and sober up. Christina yelled, 'Who do you think you are?' Then she called her brother's girlfriend a whore. It was crazy! Nobody can get through to her. They think she's trashy. And her ego is out of control. She's really spiraling…I would be shocked if she's not in rehab in the next month or two."

Wow.

At this point, we're just sad for her, and we sincerely hope that she gets herself the help that she clearly needs before the situation escalates any further. Although unfortunately, we don't think that she's going to want to go willingly, which makes us fearful of what will have to happen for her to realize what a slippery slope she's on.