The horrible reality of weekends…

This is the horrible reality of weekends, that is true for almost every one of my weekends, and almost everyone I know…

Friday On friday you are so destroyed after a hard weeks work, that you really need to get drunk to some degree… At the very least share a few beers with the people at work, but most likely get actually drunk in a more (dinner with friends, drink some wine) or less (meeting up with a strictly male friends, drink some vodka, visit some bars, spend too much money) civilized way. Whichever it is, you really need to drink, to clear your mind of all the stress and troublesome thoughts of work. You drink to forget.

Saturday – is basically destroyed by hangover… you might be doing something, but wont really enjoy it much. Unless you sleep really late in the day, you will need to take a nap later. You might also go out and get drunk on saturday, but by then the fun has worn off. Now you not only drink to forget the past week, but also in denial of the next week of work.

Sunday – sunday starts out okay – you wake up and realize that you have the day off. However as soon as its past noon, your mind will be clouded and worried about work. Simply knowing that you have to go to work the next day is enough to take out most of the enjoyment of a sunday. The only part of a given weekend thats truly mentally restful is the time from you wake up sunday morning, and until around noon. The rest is simply recovering from, or worrying about, work.

There you have it. Work sucks. Weekends suck. Life sucks. Life is hell.

5 Responses to “The horrible reality of weekends…”

I hate my job so much!!!!!! It’s so freakin’ boring and it doesn’t even
challenge me!

Life in this office is repetitive….nothing new or exciting happens. It’s the same thing everyday
People here are so freakin’ nosy, everyone is undercover and a kiss ass, and everyone is so happy joy joy like everything is dandy. I can’t stand these fake people

Why do we work?
We work because greedy people need us to help them buy nice things and
feel a sense of self importance. In fact, that is their sole reason for
existence. For all of you employees out there who don’t care about
becoming employee of the month and just want to get through the day, here is a to-do list to help you become a better time waster.

Is this good for the me?
You have to ask yourself this question with every decision you make. For
example, do you think a little unpaid extra work from home is appropriate? Does the company ever pay you for something you didn’t do? Just for being such a great employee? Why should you give the extra effort to please when they don’t?

Get a late start
This doesn’t apply to all jobs, but for many, we arrive long before our
bosses do. Time it so that you arrive right before your boss does. Once
he does get there, act like you’ve been working hard and it’s time for a
break. Then take your well deserved break.

Spend more time discussing
Schedule a “business meeting” with an office buddy, then close the door and talk about how trashed you got last weekend. Make sure to extend this for at least an hour so it appears to be a very productive meeting. Take some fake notes (and practice your doodling skills). You will have a much brighter day if you forget about work and chat a little.

Take more bathroom breaks
The one place even the worst employer can’t touch you (no pun intended). No, it’s not the most exciting place to be, but you can read that book you’ve been meaning to or perhaps, play a game on your cell phone. Whatever you do, it beats work. Know what IBS is? Irritable Bowel Syndrome. You eat the wrong thing, and you’re in for a nice long bathroom visit. Guess what? Nobody is going to question that. Why not have it? You could also have frequent urinary tract infections. Everyone is so afraid of lawsuits these days. Would they dare question your medical condition?

Make yourself indispensable
Mess something up and be the only one who would know how to fix it. Let’s
say you’re a programmer – write some code that will cause a problem at a
certain date. Make it very easy to fix. Then, when that date arrives,
give a believable excuse as to what went wrong. Explain that this
is going to take up all of your time for the next couple of days. Spend
the next day or 2 surfing the web, then fix the problem. Suddenly, you’re seen as a hero and somebody that they better keep around. Maybe this doesn’t apply to your situation, but with a little creativity, you can come up with a solid plan. Make us proud!

My parents and just about everyone told me that I could do whatever I set my mind to.

This sounded believeable when I was 8. Now I’m not so sure it’s sound advice.

Myth #2:

My counselor and teachers told me that employers are just looking for a degree. This shows your commitment and ability to achieve goals.

Sure, great. Except that it’s not true. They want an ass kisser and someone totally excited about whatever crappy business they have. And someone with certain skills, not potential and smarts. You could tell them that you’re a genius, and they’ll ask: “Yeah, but do you have 4 years experience in Microsoft Office?”

“Yes, but not professional experience, as I’ve been studying and getting A’s in school.”

“Hmm…ok…we’ll call you.”

I could go on, but I’m tired. It does feel good to rant a bit. Remember kids: stay in school.