What type of Flame Warrior are you?

The Netizen's Guide to Flame Warriors attempts to characterize the chief beligerents who plague internet discussion forums, but it will always be a work in progress; many Warriors remain un-cataloged, others disappear, and new variants arise as combatants adapt to the ever-changing digital battlefield. Be vigilant!

I am:

Evil Clown

Evil Clown is very quick with a joke, but his jests always have a barb. He has little patience for in-depth discussions and will often disrupt exchanges between serious forum participants by introducing irrelevant topics, fatuous quips, and offhand comments. His greatest thrill is to taunt and humiliate weaker or more plodding Warriors with his snappy ripostes. Not a particularly powerful Warrior, Evil Clown will attempt to avoid defeat by accusing his attacker of having no sense of humor.

0 Thoughts:

Links:

I am Avitable. Currently, I live in Orlando, where I collect comic books and masturbate to midget horse porn. I am married, and my wife lets me be the true geek that I am. I fear vegetables and sunlight. I love my friends and family dearly and hate everyone else tremendously.

This blog is the personal property and private opinion of Adam Heath Avitable. This blog is a work of fiction, the names in this blog are fictitious, and any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. On a less serious note, if you're reading this, you agree to send me three dollars for every word you have read. Just by reading this far, you owe me $111.00 now. If you are wearing pants or any type of pant-like clothing, you must remove them immediately. This blog is pants-free. If you're sitting in your underwear and socks, you're ok by me. You further agree that you have a sense of humor, you're not easily offended, and you can quote at least 28 lines from "The Simpsons" ("Me fail English? That's unpossible!" doesn't count). If you know me pre-blog, you must comment on at least one article. It's only fair. I'd do it for you. C'mon, just do it. Come on! Come on! Come on! If you're new to this blog, then you'd better fucking comment. Why bother reading it otherwise, jerk? If you have any amateur porn on your computer of you and your loved ones engaging in interesting activities, please send it to me immediately. You will get nothing in return. If while readi1ng this blog, you laugh hysterically, fall off your seat, pee just a little in your pants, and pull down your monitor on your head, I'm not liable. If you get up in disgust and walk away, completely unamused, trip on the mass of wires next to your computer and end up with your mouse lodged in your right eyesocket, I'm not liable. If you're reading this blog and you fall asleep because it sucks horribly, and you land facefirst on your keyboard and have a permanent "Y" stuck in your forehead, I'm not liable, but send me a pic so I can laugh at you. If you suffer emotional distress from my laughing at you, then you can sue. VERY IMPORTANT!! If you have, at any point in your life, participated in or enjoyed any of the following activities (watched wrestling, visited a NASCAR track more than once, watched Jeff Foxworthy, finger fucked your cousin, know one or two country music stations by their call sign, name and slogan, eaten roadkill, purchased furniture or electronics from rent-to-own, slept in your own puke for more than one consecutive evening, or worn a baseball cap backwards), you must close this window, shut off your computer, grab the nearest utensil, and shove it directly into your belly button. Then lift straight up, twisting a little, until you feel a slight *twinge*. If you've read this far, you can Paypal me $1266.00 now.