Monday, August 30, 2010

COMMENTS: Halladay! Celebrate! We-are-going-to-get-our-ass-kicked. The Dodgers came through on the Weisman-mandated four-game win streak, and now they're clean out of winnin' for the season. Just in time for the McCourts' divorce trial! Does this team have its timing down or what?

UPDATE from Sax 4:58p: Looks like Ken Levine of Dodger Talk has taken over dodgers.com! How else to explain comedic headlines like this:

Dodgers consistently take longer than any other team to post the lineup for the day's game. I follow a bunch of other (non-Dodger) writer/Twitterers and official news feeds and such, and this is consistently the case, I have determined after a detailed analysis.

@Dusty - Joe's probably looking for his glasses (which are probably on top of his head) so he can see what he writes on the lineup card. That or Mattingly is in charge tonight and he needs to revise the lineup to ensure Kemp bats second and sixth and Manny hits cleanup.

Yikes, that bottom third of the lineup looks like a black hole of offensive suckitude. Carroll has a broken finger, Barajas is 0-9 lifetime against Halliday and Kuroda has as many hits this year as I do.

Of course, the rest of the lineup has the potential for only marginally less offense suckitude.

Worthless sack of crap LFSlightly smaller sack of crap 2BPretty good RFGOD CFWorthless sack of suck 1BAging sack of suck 3BBizarrely high OBP SSWorthless sack of suck who still beats the combination of two more worthless sacks of suck CKuroda P

I can get out of work at about 6:15 and am going to break several laws in order to get home by draft time. If not it will be soon thereafter and I'll just have to let the computer select the first few rounds. This may actually be a better strategy all told, anyway. Is Roger Staubach available?