June 26, 2011

June 26th, Monday 6.30pm- Next Devonport r*n will be set by Tracka from 98 Best Street Devonport, for a night of Ten Pin Bowling. Wear odd sox, bring $10, money for a fabulous raffle, BYO extra drinks if a p*sshead.

June 21, 2011

Torrential rain preceded Hare Cheese's run, wiping any trace of whatever run he may or may not have set for us. Assuming he was jet-lagged and broke, probably not eaten anything decent for weeks (USA McDonalds and whatever they fed him on the plane), he probably hadn't set much of a trail at all. Besides there was bike viewing to be done!

The rain stopped, and we were quickly handed bits of paper, and off we went. Walkers walked to the 'place where we tell the time' (the Ulverstone Clock) and back again, runners went else-where. It was a miracle none of us got drenched and drowned as there were some serious squalls happening all around us. Qudos to the Hash Monk! Driving home at night revealed lots of debris on the road.

At the OnOn we had Shephards pie and nibblies compliments of Dini the caterer. We had to put up with the smell of Cheese's new bike, and momentarily listen to the finely tuned exhaust when peer pressure made Cheese turn the beast over. The rigged raffle was not rigged enough, I won no prizes, but all the bald, old, ugly bastards did!

June 14, 2011

Hash Grub has been scoring high these last few months. Fanny May set the bar very high and everyone is nervous. Captain Crab commanded his wife Juliet into action and as a team they had pre-run nibbles waiting for hungry Hashers. Flasher had set a long run to built up the appetites as only a dozen or so were braving the extreme temperatures and the piles of food Crab was preparing was not going to go to waste. Even the walkers were given a good 5k+ stretch - see RunKeeper's map (link may not work if you are not on Dini's StreetTeam) for Dini, Dyke and GA's walk.

On return we were greeted with foamy alcoholic drinks inspired by the recent Highland Fling. The best BBQ for donkeys, complete with onions, fresh wholemeal bread, and the works followed the cold foam. Coffee and Lamingtons for desert, Port, ice-cream,... In the mean time the mercury plummeted towards zero, Dini had to find more firewood in her car, and Otto's Grotto may well have been an igloo. Flasher was going rampant on the raffle, not stopping till everyone except the biggest losers had a prize.

Winter Solstice is June 21, which is the day after our next run at one of Dyke's domiciles (TBA). So expect even cooler temps as the days are still getting shorter. Bring skates and scarves and watch this space for geographic details.

NB. Not only was the meat not burned, it truly was Crab's lucky day as he won the only other remaining copy of the garden book that he had already won earlier (and subsequently lost) in a wrigged raffle in summer.

June 9, 2011

That's right! Highland Fling this weekend. Hash Monks are putting in a combined effort to keep the weather out, so why not help them by doing a little rain dance right now.

Anyways, you may also like to know what transpired last Monday. Tracka was due to set a run, and we had all hoped for a cryptic piece of paper and no proper real trail, tons of pizza to help digest our beer and a happy Tracka, but to our surprise Dyke showed up instead. He told us that Tinsel was struck with a bad case of lets just say Tinselitis for now and needed hospitalisation! The good man Tracka is gave Tinsel the time and care a Hasher of her caliber deserved and delegated the run out to Dyke.

A cold long run for the runners, and a merciful marathon for the walkers was what Dyke had in store for us. Tinsel was sick and we were not meant to be happy. After 7+ kilometers the smiles were frozen off our faces and once warmed up at Dyke's abode we dug into the dim-sims. What followed we can only presume was a sign of Dyke's allegiance to Democrat Wiener (who has recently been in the news because of photos of his wiener) inspired him to boil up some wieners for us. With a dash of home made rhubarb pickle, with a dash of chili, it did us well.

The beer was awesome, the raffle was wrigged and the prizes were palatable just like the wieners. OnOn Dyke for rescuing the situation and OnOn to Tracka for being a good husband and we all wish Tinsel a quick recovery and hope to see her come back to Hash soon.

The Odd Sock Hash

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Listen and Learn!

DH3 Hash Song

Good ol’ Devonport for ever,We’re the best hash club around,We know how to take the short cuts,In the bush or in the town,Side by side we drink together,From a stubby can or glass,Good ol’ Devonport forever,Burnie takes it up the arse.

DOWN DOWN DOWN DOWN

If you are bored with the songs we sing why not learn a couple of these songs:

NW Google Hash Group

Burnie TRASH Repository

Burnie Trash, including select historical editions, can be viewed on line <here>.

OFFICE BEARERS 2017-18

DH3 Committee 2017/18

Grandmaster - Crab

Joint Masters - Pioneer and Bastard

Trailmasters -Bald Eagle and Maggie

Walkers Trailmasters -Soff and Shagadellic

Hare Raiser-Guardy

Hash Hops -Cheese

Hash Cash -Tracka

Hash Stats -Tracka

Hash Lip -Crow and Soff

Hash Flash -Gone Again

Hash Hawker -Bastard

Beer Bitch -Tinsel

Hash Scribe -Tracka and Tinsel

Hash Texta -Guardy

Hash Monk -Cistern

Independent Hash Marriage Guidance Councilors -Koff

Wrigged Wraffle -Tracka

And incidentally,....

1. HASH HOPS: This is unquestionably the most important position in the hash. The Beermeister has the weighty responsibility of making sure that the lifeblood of hashing is available at each and every hash event. He keeps constant vigilance to find the cheapest spirituous fermenti available, always has coolers in the trunk of his car, cases of beer in his garage, and reliably returns the empty keg to get another full one for the next hash. While this might be a "pain in the ass" job, it's undoubtedly the most important one to the hash.

2. GRAND MASTER: The head hasher. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert's legacy. The GM is not simply a figure head for the hash, rather (s)he personifies the hash's character (or lack thereof.) (S)he leads with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the hash officers, (s)he gives inspiration, direction, and vision to all. This position ranks only below Beermeister, Hash Cash, Hash Mouth, Hash Flash, and On-Sec in real importance to the hash.

3. HASH HAWKER or HABERDASHER: This is a person who has a flair for fashion, a head for business (who said head?), and the showmanship of P.T. Barnum. (S)he's responsible for the design, procurement, warehousing, merchandising, and vending of items of apparel and various trinkets to the hash. Prior flea market or circus midway experience preferred.

4. HARE RAISER: The Hare Raiser makes sure that there's a hare (or hares) for each hash, and that the start location is known to the On-Sec well in advance of hash day for publicity purposes. The Hare Raiser IS the hare if (s)he can't find anyone else to do it.

5. HASH CASH: The holder of the purse-strings. Someone needs to dash about the start of each hash begging for money. Someone has to keep track of what comes in and what goes out (commonly referred to as "the old in and out.") These generally unappreciated duties fall on the shoulders of the Hash Cash. This trustworthy soul must withstand the whining of the Hares who have overspent, the whimpering of those who forgot their fees, and the interrogations of those who mistakenly think there should be some sort of accounting for hash funds.

6. HASH FLASH: The person who captures for posterity all embarrassing hash moments on film. The hash flash must have an acute sense of the absurd to know what to take photos of, and also a small degree of reliability to bring a camera, film, take pictures, have them developed, and put only the finest thereof into the sacred photo album.

7. HASH HARLOT: A trashy wench who has seen the dark side of hashing... and likes it! One with a lust for life who, revels in being the butt of the jester's ribald wit, the object of the songster's bawdy lyric, and the centerpiece of sensual repartee at all hash functions.

9. LIP : The hash mouth runs the official business at the On-On with an iron hand. (S)he must be loud, clear, passionate, articulate, humorous and possess an uncommon ability to think on his feet. It also helps if (s)he speaks English.

10. HASHIT KEEPER: This is arguably the most complicated position within the hash hierarchy. The responsibility surrounds custody of a large cardboard box (or entire house) filled with the flotsam and jetsam of past hashes. Precisely why this crap is retained is a mystery shrouded in the mythology of hashdom. However, the hashit itself rarely makes it to the hash, although the custodian is usually there himself. This reinforces the argument that remembering to bring the hashit is probably beyond the cognitive ability of your average hasher.

11. ON-SEC: This position is the masochist's dream. (S)he struggles with piles of paper, miles of computer wire, and might attempt to occasionally produce a Hound Directory or Hash Trash to keep the hash members somewhat informed. (S)he is the principal "outside" representative maintaining the Harrier.Net Worldwide WebSite, the hash membership data base. Boring stuff to say the least.

12. RELIGIOUS ADVISOR: Keeper of the faith. Enforcer of the scriptures. This is the hasher who has seen the light (Bud light) and can taste in his soul the true spirit of Hashing. The religious advisor spreads the word and inspires the zest and zeal of the hash in all participants. Any hasher found transgressing the spirit of hashing is disciplined by the RA. (S)e is the keeper of the sacred Laws of Hashing and comes up with sufficiently plausible lies to cover any serious questions of propriety of actions within the hash.

13. SONGMEISTER: This is a hasher with no self-respect. (S)he never lacks for a song suitable to the occasion. His songs are risqué, lewd, and vulgar. The Songmeister speaks with other hashers and hashes to acquire songs to add to the hash hymnal. The mission is to explore new tunes and new celebrations. To boldly go where no Songmeister has gone before (pardon the split infinitive.)