Became tired of suburban life; the smog, the traffic, the too-close neighbors...

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Oleander Tea Anyone?

Oleander-

I have a bit of a rant going on here today, and it deals with blogging.

Yesterday many blogs gave praise to Independance Day, as should be. One of the 27 blogs on my favorites list surprised me with his patriotism. I commented jokingly with something to the effect of "Who stole insert name here?"He commented back very strongly, apparently unhappy that I'd think he's not patriotic. This is a blogger who discusses recreational drug use, blow jobs, and uses the F- word frequently.Well SORRY! The people I know who've served in the military including my husband are all from the Vietnam era. Most of them were drafted right after high school graduation. Mr. SB served in Vietnam and Cambodia. When the GIs returned to the states they were not greeted kindly, to say the least. I assumed you were of that era, and didn't expect the patriotism.

Then there's the Ms. Popular type bloggers. They have a good number of commenters, but reply only to their favorites. I've come across three so far, finally deleting two from my favorites, and going so far as to remove one from the links list on my blogsite. Why should I waste my time?

Finally, there is a famous blogger who's name pops up constantly throughout blogland. Everybody seems to love her, but I just don't get it. To be fair, I've looked at the postings less than a dozen times. Her writing is good, and she turns out wonderfully descriptive phrasing, but the subject matter is depressing. Apparently turning off her comments upset a great many readers.

Well I guess I feel better now... I just might reread what I've written and delete this posting, but maybe not.

33 Comments:

I'm sorry I came off so gruff. I can be a dick. I love ya SB. You caught me in a bad mood and I shouldn't have been rude. I hope you come back to my blog and still leave insightful and quick witted comments. Again I'm sorry.

Gee Nick how did you know it was you?You're AOK in my book!I guess you're too young to be Vietnam era...I don't know about insightful, but I do try for quick witted comments, and of course I'll be back to visit!

It's hard sometimes when commenting to know what's going on in a person's life at that moment. So glad to see that you and Nick Danger are cool again. I kinda thought Nick Danger was older, too, just because that's a name from Firesign Theater back in the early 70's.

I don't get it with people who only reply to their favorites. I wouldn't bother going back and reading/commenting either.

As far as the "famous blogger", I remember the days when comments were on. A few, including my sister, really had fun there. Unfortunately she had to shut down comments because there were trolls who kept coming back and slamming some of the regulars. You probably know that her posts are depressing because she has bipolar disease. Reading her early posts helped me to understand more about the disease and what goes through a person's head during the horrible episodes. Not everybody has to like her. I still read her stuff but I only go about once a week. I check your site a few times a day. :-)

squirl-Did you see "White Oleander?"I notice how gracious you, Bucky, Susie, Nick... well most everybody I go visit regularly is with responding to comments.Like I said, I like you-know-who's writing, but it's depressing to me. Trolls are the reason I jumped ship from Craigslist, they were evil and vindictive.You made my day with your comment that you check my site a few times a day!

I learned a lot of what I call "blog protocol" from Bucky. Susie was a good early influence, too. We do hang out in a really cool group here. I appreciate that. And I do appreciate my commenters. Because of people who went to my sister's site I was very lucky to get lots of comments right away. Even Bucky's original posts have very few if any comments. It pays to know people in high places. Especially if they wear assless chaps. :-)

Oops, I guess I wasn't quite done. No, I didn't see White Oleander. Ichabod told me that oleander is poisonous, I'm assuming that's what your title is about. And I check your site so I don't get complacent and think you haven't posted. I end up coming in really late if I don't.

romani heart-I did the same thing! I always visit anyone who comments, but it took awhile for me to realize the etiquette of commenting back.

squirl-Yes, oleander is quite poisonous. I like it because the deer usually shy away from it.Susie's site taught me a lot too, and Bucky's assless chaps stuff just cracks me up!I'm glad you finally learned to post pictures, I think it adds a lot to a blog.

You know it's refreshing to see you speak your mind (specific enough but not SPECIFIC enough with links to really cause ill harm)

Since I'm very new to the whole blogging thing, I just hope I haven't or don't in the future cause anyone any grief. Isn't it weird to think that someone we don't really know in real live can hurt our feelings/piss us off/or even make us smile?

I scoured your links list to see who you removed (I'm *so* nosey like that, but I couldn't figure it out) and I saw that I was listed(!!!!). Thank you! Seriously, that made my day (I'm such a goober, I know :-)

Oh how I love wry and subtle humor! That picture combined with the title was masterfully done! Hats off!! And I think blogging would be boring if everyone blogged about sunshine and smiles each and every day!

I'm glad you didn't delete it :). It's the same frustrations all of us feel on occasion. I feel so catty and Jr High when I take someone off my favorite blog list. Fine, don't talk to me. You are sooo off my buddy list!

White Oleander - wasn't that the Michelle Pfeiffer movie with the deranged daughter (in good reason)?

day musings-Welcome! Hey, I used to live in Manassess (spelling?) when I was little!Good lord, don't be drinking oleander tea!

soozieq-I just try to go by the Golden Rule... do unto others...Glad to make you smile!

eclectic-Well thank you!Normally I am sunshine and smiles. My family is healthy and I retired young, so what's to complain about? But sometimes...

jac-If you have oleander, be sure not to eat it!Oh, but you are one of my favorites, in fact you're on my favorites list in my computer. Anal retentive person that I am, I have a formula:Person comments x amount of times goes on my computer favorites.Comments going both ways xx amount of times goes on my links list on my blogsite.I was just about to add you to my links list!

kitty-I agree, I also felt so jr. high after I posted this, but hey... sometimes one needs to vent.You're right about the movie!

cheesecakey-So many people hate oleander and call it a freeway plant, but I love it too.I'll be emailing you!

I hope I've never blown anyone off. If I have it was purely by accident of being busy or just being the ding-dong that I can be. I'm not sure if I've ever commented here, but I loved to read your ancestry blog. Mr. Danger is an enigma wrapped in a riddle. He constantly surprises me which is why I love him.

rae ann-Yeah, Nick is always full of surprises... especially his poetry!I doubt you've hurt any feelings.I miss doing my ancestry blog, but haven't had time for research lately. It'll probably return in a few months.

kat-Welcome!No, I certainly wouldn't be the one to write about blog etiquette!I 'sorta' just follow the leader and learn.I actually started my blog almost 2 years ago, but did such a bad job that I started over, and figured out how to post pictures.

Ok, first I would like to say that I checked my ENTIRE blog and anyone who has commented to me I have either commented back or commented on their blog. Second, I was the other one Nick yelled at and it hurt my feelings, too. Third, being bipolar, it helps to read about other bipolar people's experiences, even though they probably don't make much sense to normal people. I'm sorry if I was the rude one.

Sierrabella, I was another of those that didn't reply back to commenters, unless there was something that needed to be answered or they said something that REALLY got me thinking. Now I try to reply back. I'm usually a walking faux pas anyway, so I guess blogging shouldn't be any different. I must being doing something right though, I didn't get voted off your list :)

bipolarprincess-Good-lord-no, you weren't one of the rude ones!I'd noticed Nick had yelled at you too, but didn't want to throw your name into the equation.Glad to hear that famous blogger has been beneficial reading for you.

jac!You've never provoked me!Ever! How could a poet provoke anything but good thoughts?

sylvana-I believe I was striking out at those bloggers who seem to ignore all commenters except the members of their little clique of friends.

I don't know how the bloggers with 40+ comments per day do it! I'm talking about people like susie who are gracious enough to answer each and every comment.

I'm guilty of not responding to all comments as well. Sometimes, you just don't know *how* to respond to what people might have to say.

I really enjoy your blog but have been hesitatant to link you, not because of any ideological differences, but because I'm wary of sending my trolls to you. That happened to one blogger I listed and I felt terrible about it(speaking of depressing writers).

Blog comments are not that nuanced and we don't have the benefits of body language etc. though I think we all know when its time to de-link people. If you are routinely ignored, and all the other regular commentors get links as you're left to your lonesome-that's a pretty good clue.

If you would like a link, let me know. (I sooo wanted to post a link to that bit about the service tag on a dildo).

jsm (goody)-You have trolls? I haven't had that experience yet, and hope not to!I visited your site today and commented on what I believe was yesterday's post. It sounds like I stirred some stuff up over there too!Guess I'd better lay low for awhile and avoid the backlash...

Well, now. First, it was nice to have my name mentioned in a positive way here, thank you, ladies. Second, I was relieved because I've been seriously blog-visiting-delinquent in recent weeks, and thought, "oh phuck! SierraBella has axed me!" But, no. Good ;)

I followed Bucky's example from the beginning of not being TOO personal; there's way more to Ms. Bucky than we know, and I like that. I like to get to know people, but I don't want to read EVERY sad detail of their lives on their blogs. That's just me. That's not to criticize people who write that way. I just move on from those kind of blogs. Blogging, for me, was intended to be fun and recreational, and I try to keep it that way. However, having said that, I do appreciate poignant posts, too, and I have very much enjoyed getting to know some bloggers a bit better through email, including difficult things in their lives. I also followed Bucky's example of responding to comments on her blog. And THAT is one of my very favorite things about blogging. I like to have little one-on-one exchanges with people. Very often, the visitors' comments, or the banter, are so much more entertaining than my posts.

There is a certain blogger who is on MANY people's links list, and I read, and I know it's supposed to be entertaining, but it doesn't do a daggone thing for me. Actually, there are a couple of those. See, I think gossip is so wrong and I try not to do it. But when I read this here, I thought, ooh! ooh! who is it? You email me with yours, and I'll email you with mine ;)

I used to have serious fun on the comments page at that one place, just cutting up with Bucky and friends. I was a relative newcomer there, at least a tiny bit newer than some of the cool kids, and some of the cool kids there never did accept me into the group. But Bucky did. Greenie, mrtl, Circus Kelli, LadyBug, I'm sure I'm forgetting someone, oh, lawbrat, definitely, anyhow, these are people, who, like you, I think I would enjoy hanging out with in realworld, too. And of course, thru Bucky I got to meet our squirlygirl.

I spend too much time in blogworld. I try to schedule it, but I find when I have a spare moment I'll pop on, and that moment turns into 20 . . . A lot of nice and interesting people have stopped in to see me and I STILL haven't made it to visit them, but it's not personal. It's just that I go first to catch up on "older" friends, and don't always make it to newer ones.

susie-I can't imagine you ever doing anything which would cause anyone to axe you!Both you and Bucky were such great role models as to blog-etiquette.It seems I struck a nerve with this posting and my numbers have gone way up... so it's become a little more time consuming for me lately.I'll be emailing you shortly!