To think you don't let your toddler play with noisy electic games on a packed train?

Or any train for that matter. I was on jam packed train at the weekend (no spare seats, aisle full of people standing up) and one woman was sat with her small child playing with a toy that said 'triangle', 'square' etc when the kid pressed each shape. I was a couple of seats in front & could hear it! AIBU to think this was utterly selfish of the mum? Other people were giving her the evils but she seemed oblivious.

Maybe she was so tired and stressed, the mother just didn't care. When a toddler gets bored, it's really hard to keep them quiet and surely a noisy toy is better than a surly, screaming child? If the train was very busy, then it will have been noisy anyway.

I still find it hard to entertain DS aged 5 on long journeys and I find it very stressful. Flights are always the worst, and I spend all my time trying to keep him quiet which is totally exhausting and very labour-intensive.

"Well done darling, yes it is a triangle, how clever, you are only 3 aren't you darling...darling?...yes we can play on mummy's phone in a minute - can you say paralelogram? can you say it? Can you remember to say it at nursery?

Think about how people bitch on here about 'loud parenting' - and yet I often do this on long journeys - we might play Uno, or Ispy or test the kids on timestables or whatever and it is noisy. We are not precious or worthy parents, just normal people but I think other passengers would find this annoying.

On long journeys we will do a range of activities (provided we get our reserved seats and aren't left to sit on floor o/s toilet) these include colouring, drawing,listening to story tapes - but I do remember how hard iot is to entertain a toddler - too young for story CDs, can colour but quickly loses interest - playdo is a good option - but pens get knocked on floor, drawing gets frustrating quickly and a toddler will let you know in a vocal way. Sometimes an electronic toy which happens to be noisy is the best option in a stressful situation as the alternative is crying/constant questions.

"I'm pretty shocked at the number of people on here who think it's A-OK to have a loud and irritating electronic game on no matter how many people are being effectively forced to listen to it. "

I don't really think it is A-OK,but there may be times depending on the age of the child,and the time and duration of the journey,when it is the least worst scenario.Also - no-one should have to put up with noise they don't like in their own home.In public spaces you will be exposed to things which annoy you. I hate,absolutely loathe,background music in shops.It makes me tense and twitchy.(And to me it serves no purpose,unlike a toy keeping a child happy)But it is out there,I am forced to listen to it every time I go shopping,that's life.

And EchoBitch said "no-one minds the sound of childrens voices" - not sure about that either,not here on MN maybe,but in RL I've got the distinct impression that sitting in complete silence on the train would be fine,but the reading and constant question asking and answering we were doing was at least as annoying as some people obviously find the electronic toys!

Six of one and half a dozen of another. how loud is loud? Was the carriage conversation free? This thread could just have easily been about a fellow passenger having a loud conversation. Would that have prompted the same responses from the YANBU supporters? I may have missed the info regarding the toy being played with constantly thought the 5 or 6 hour journey. If that is the case then yes it would be irritating. Though I'm not sure how many children would play with a single toy for that length of time without bing irritatd themselves.

What was the answer to the child-friendly headphones question? Not an option?

(genuine question)

I'm pretty shocked at the number of people on here who think it's A-OK to have a loud and irritating electronic game on no matter how many people are being effectively forced to listen to it. It's almost as if the parent or the child making the noise wouldn't necessarily annoy others but would embarrass the parent, whereas devolving the noise-making onto a machine makes it no-one's fault, as if trilling WELL DONE THAT IS A TRIANGLE constantly throughout a five or six hour journey is an act of god or something.

YABU. Surely what this actually boils down to is a personal preference on types of noise and noise levels. E.G for me I would have no problem with a child's noisy toy though I would be irritated at someone 'chamming' their way through a packet of crisps. My problem, not theirs.I have a 3 year old DD who, by most standards, is very well behaved. However every journey we take I try to be as prepared as possible just incase of a melt down moment. I am sure many would take exception to me doing the following during the course of a journey:*loud parenting (still not sure what this issue is with this) and discussing every thing we see out of the window*singing favourite songs*reading, followed by colouring, stickers etc*non noisy toysHowever if all of the above had been exhausted and my DD favourite toy happened to have noise then you can bet it will be brought out. This reasoning is two fold. Firstly as my daughters happiness and my Sanity is very important to me and secondly I am of the opinion that the majority of people would rather hear the toy than a child having a meltdown!

And yes when I was a child my parents didn't have electronic toys to keep us busy on journeys with. However I do remember having My Little Ponies all over the table during a trip to Scotland and my brother playing with toy trains. Different toy but still noisy because guess what......toddlers on the whole are noisy, Especially when they are unsure/bored/trapped!

Why do some go out of their way to stick the boot in whenever possible?It would be rude if the toddler was throwing crisps around, spitting on the floor, purposefully screaming in people's faces or smearing crap everywhere....but playing with a toy on a train! <shakes head in sadness at the amount of miserable smug self righteous sods around>

Also trains aren't actually places designed to sleep, relax, work or read. This is what people do to pass the time in the same way this mother was. For what it's worth I find it a pain in the arse when some woman has imprisoned me by falling asleep and blocking my access to the toilet. Do you know what though that's life, it's not important and I get on with it!