My son will be 3 in June and I still have not introduced him to many foods, including eggs, nuts, and fish. He did react to milk as an infant, but I've never tried him back on it, and he seems to have an intolerance to soy.
I have MANY food allergies, and I have to carry an epipen. I have been near death a few times before from my food allergies, and I am so sared of him dying from trying something new. I feel myself have panic attacks whenever he is playing with friends who are drinking milk or eating peanut butter. I want to overcome these fears because I may be limiting his diet for no reason. Whenever I try to talk to his GI doc about this stuff she just smiles and nods like she is agreeing with me that I should be scared.
It doesn't help that my husband has a life threatening allergy to animal dander, and has had to be life flighted from being too close to a goat once.
Even though he has never had a life threatening reaction YET (knock on wood), I still freak when he gets one hive or a little bit of eczema. Am I needlessly scared? How do you handle the fear and food challenges?

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

What I am hearing is that you want to protect your son from developing the food allergies. That is understandable. I see no problem with delaying the introduction of certain foods as long as his nutritional needs are being met.
We were told not to introduce peanuts until she was 5 as our daughter has food allergies to eggs and milk. When we last met with her allergist we asked about peanuts (she's 5 now). We were told we can introduce them and call him if she reacts. It sounds so barbaric and I haven't had the energy to introduce them yet. So I understand where you are coming from.
I am also hearing that you are having fears of him dying or experiencing severe allergic reactions as you have experienced. You are projecting allergies onto him that are not currently present. You are concerned to the point that you are developing panic attacks. This is not good for either of you. I would suggest thinking through the scarier senarios and developing a plan to protect him should he ever develop a reaction.
You say he reacted to milk. Have you had him tested? Does he have an auto-injector?
Can you carry moist towelettes in case of accidental skin contact with an allergen? Can you carry a cell phone?

Hi Shai -- I totally understand why you feel as you do. But I agree that this constant state of "panic"' and worry about your son isn't healthy for either of you. It doesn't seem like your son's doctor is offering much in the way of helping you deal with your worries. Given you and your husband's history of allergies, why not have your son tested -- although not a definitive way of determining food allergy, it would at least give you something to go on and perhaps alleviate some of your worry. From that point, you can decide if / when / how you want your son to try eating the new foods. You have the benefit of having food allergies (if you can say there is any benefit of food allergy) so you know what to look for and how to deal with it. Without anticipating the worst, know that you can trust in your ability to respond appropriately if need be.

I also understand you fear and concern. We discovered accidentally that our son was allergic to peanuts when he was 4 months old because his older brother dropped a rice cake with peanut butter on his leg and he got hives within a few minutes.

In a crazy logical way, I have always been grateful that we found out this way and didn't discover his allergy the first time he ingested it and which I believe not would have resulted in a more serious reaction.

Allergy testing can be helpful, but should your allergist refuse to test or even if the result is negative (because there are false negatives), personnally before feeding him any food you think he might be allergic to, I would start off slowly by first putting a miniscule amount on his skin and waiting for a reaction, if none than perhaps a little bit more etc... Then perhaps a little bit on the lips, then tongue etc... Then and only then, if there is no reaction, would I let him ingest a tiny, tiny amount at a time waiting in between to monitor a reaction. Check with your doctor before hand, but the risk of a serious reaction is much greater with ingesting than skin contact.

I have asked about allergy testing and all the doctors tell me to go by his symptoms because testing isn't 100% accurate, though I had testing and it was very accurate. As soon as I stopped eating everything I tested class 2 or more for on the RAST I got better. I wish it were that easy with him.

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

I don't think so. I don't think they want to be liable is something happened. My allergist might be up for it. He sees the family doctor, and a gi specialist at Children's for his reflux. He was at the allergist once and they said just to bring him in if he is having problems but that we should go by his symptoms rather than tests and that we should be concerned with MY history of allergies and my husbands. They said we should keep him off of the more allergenic stuff for as long as we can. But I was thinking I really wanted to get him a real birthday cake this year. And I'm tired of being paranoid and scared all the time that he is going to have a bad reaction to something.

_________________2 year old son: allergic to milk--waiting to introduce other allergens

I get sweaty palms when my son plays with children who drink milk and soy - or eat any kind of cookie candy thing. It's impossible for me not to feel completely on edge. And while other mothers are conversing, I'm scanning the area for whatever is in his path of touching. I don't know if I have any solutions, I don't. Just know that there are others out there who feel like you.
Denise
Mom to James 16 months

Denise - I think that is pretty normal (I'm assuming your son is allergic to both milk and soy). It is incredibly challenging when they are little and around other little people covered (it sometimes seems) in your child's allergens.

Some friends will be very supportive and others will be less so, as you probably already know. Can you explain your concerns to your friends and see if the get-togethers can be made more food-free? Or at least confine the food to one place and time and then clean the kids up well before they play?

It does get a lot easier (in that respect) as the kids get older and less messy.

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