All posts by Melisa

We live in a world, where being alone is something that scares us, that is why many time we lose ourselves, forgetting who we really are, being what we are not, in order to be accepted by others so we don’t have to face the dreaded solitude. But solitude is not something we should be scared of, but the opposite, as sometimes it is the best way to find ourselves.

If we pay attention to what is happening around us, we can discover just by looking at people and their relationship with others, that actually being alone could be a benefit for our soul and life rather than a drawback, and you might be wondering why? Why it would be a benefit? Because being alone makes us reflect, it allows us to discover ourselves, because it is in the silence of our solitude where we can hear our inner voice. Solitude takes out the best version of ourselves, and it makes us find who we really are.

By being alone we allow us to move away from the outside world, and so we begin to think for ourselves, we question things, we start to find answers to our deepest questions, and sometimes that can be really hard, because it makes us realize that we were wrong in a lot of aspects in our life, especially in our idea of who we really are. So we start to listen to our own soul, and suddenly we find what we were looking for, we find ourselves.

”It’s beautiful to be alone. To be alone does not mean to be lonely. It means the mind is not influenced and contaminated by society.’’ – Jiddu Krishnamurti

Nowadays one of the biggest problem we are facing is that we actually don’t know who we really are, we just are what others wanted us to be, we are a product of society, so we accept that reality, but deep inside our hearts we feel incomplete, like if something was missing in ourselves, and so we found ourselves in the middle of a battle between the reality of our mind and the reality of our soul.

The problem is that not being alone with ourselves is blocking us to be what we really wanted to be. The fear of being alone makes us have the necessity to be with others, so we are what others want us to be in order to not be alone, or we surround ourselves with people who make us feel more lost, empty and the worst thing is that we find ourselves more alone than before.

”Don’t be scared to walk alone. Don’t be scared to like it.’’ – John Mayer

So I learned, that there is no way that you can find what you have been looking for, if you don’t start by loving to be with your own company. Once you know yourself and you do the things you love, and above all once you start loving yourself more you will learn that solitude is something that gives you the opportunity to be who you always wanted to be, and do the things you ever wanted to be. You will discover that being alone gives you wings to dream and discover a completely new you, without being affected and influenced by others, then you will enjoy life more, and everything that you have ever dreamed of will come true.

If we could just learn to be alone, enjoying our own company, we would find how amazing we really are, and what can we actually do without needing anyone else to do it. Therefore, do not be afraid to be alone, because it is not a punishment but a blessing, take advantage of it, and do not be afraid to talk and laugh with yourself. Enjoy your own company, do what you love to do, travel to the places you have always wanted to go, listen to your favorite music, or read your favorite book. Sometimes to be alone is what we need, because when we are only with ourselves we are free, and we are not influenced nor controlled by society, and that way we can enjoy being our true self.

”I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.’’ – Oscar Wilde

Learn to be alone, do not be afraid to be only with yourself, love the silence, love your own voice, enjoy your own company, and feel comfortable being with your own soul. Learn to separate yourself from people who don’t let you be yourself, people who don’t let you grow and evolve.

When you stop being afraid to be alone, looking its positive side, you will learn to enjoy every second alone, and you become wiser at the time of choosing the people to whom surround yourself with. You will take your time to choose the right people, with no rush, without having the necessity to depend on others.

”I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone, it’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone.’’ – Robin Williams

We are going to be alone many times in our lives, either by choice, or because there will be no other choice, sometimes we will face it abruptly, and in that moment can be very painful, but in that solitude that is not absolute, because nobody can be really alone if we learn to love our own company, you will find your own voice, you will listen to your soul, you will enjoy your own company, you will find yourself, and you will discover that being alone was not something negative, but very positive. Solitude is a gift if we know how to take advantage of it. You can change your situation at any time, you must simply change the way you see life.

Learn to love your own company, enjoy every moment with yourself, and change your life!

You must be wondering: Failure, the road to success? And yes it is, depending on how we let failure affect us, it can be a killer of dreams or it can be the road that leads us to success.

Failure: a simple word with just a lot of meaning. A word that makes us have Goosebumps with just reading it, a word that scares, blocking us to keep moving forward, a word that dominates us, for the meaning and power we all gave it to it to control ourselves. Failure is why we haven’t made our dreams a reality; failure is what makes us keep dreaming without real achievement.

But failure wasn’t always a ‘’bad word’’.

When we were kids, failure was just a word that made us to try harder, that made us be better and better. When you are a kid failure is what gives you strength to keep moving forward until you succeed.

Remember when you were just a baby? I guess not, but let’s try to go back to those times were everything seemed possible. For example when we were trying to walk…

We felt many times until we really made it right? We tried a lot to get in our feet and walk, and we failed over and over again, but we gave up? No! We are where we are now using our feet and walking, we don’t even think about it, but one time we tried so hard to do what now seems normal, and we are doing it because we believed and we never gave up.

We didn’t stop until we succeed, we used failure as a motivation to keep trying, we had a goal and we kept pushing ourselves until we reached it.

”Failure is success if you learn from it.’’ Malcolm Forbes

And why we succeed every time we wanted to learn something new when we were kids?

Because we never gave up! In those moments you don’t get contaminated by society, you don’t have fears that don’t let you do what you want, when you are a kid you can see what others can do and use that a way to know that everything is possible, and when we grow up we can also see that others can do it, but because of our fears and lack of self-esteem we believe the fake story we told to ourselves that some of us can and some of us just can’t do it, and so you give up, or what is worst you haven’t even tried. So the problem when we grow up is that actually we start to have more fears than when we were kids. We listen what others say, we stop believing in ourselves and we start to use failure as a way to have an excuse for giving up.

If you didn’t give up because of failure, then you don’t even started because of the fear of it, am I right?

We have to go back to those moments where we were just ourselves, those moments where we believed that everything was possible, and that failure wasn’t an ending but an opportunity to improve ourselves, let’s go back to those moments where you embrace failure as a motivation, and where you go out and try over and over again until you make your goal a reality.

”Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” – Thomas Edison.

The dictionary says that Failure is a lack of success, but my experience and the experiences of people who never gave up taught me that failure is the way life has to tell us that we are in the right way to achieving our goals, because if you weren’t doing anything you will never knew what failure was neither success. You were just settled in a normal life and just existing, accepting a life where dreams are not possible.

”I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed.”– Michael Jordan

Use failure as a tool to make you to be even better than you have imagined, use it as an opportunity to keep moving forward, knowing that it doesn’t matter how many times you will fall, you will stand up every single time until you make your goal a reality.

Don’t make more excuses, do not let more the fears to control your life and emotions, and stop believing what other people say about it, what they think about your goal, it’s their reality and not yours. Not matter what happen just keep moving forward, if you felt 8 times, you got up 10. If people don’t believe in your dream, use that as a motivation to continue because you believe, and so you will keep trying, you will keep getting better, and you will be successful, and so you will make others know that they were wrong about you and your dreams.

”Success is not final, failure is not fatal. It’s the courage to continue that counts.” – Winston Churchill

Remember that failure is only real if you gave up! so don’t do it, never, until you succeed, do that for you and for the entire world, so they can use you as inspiration to make their dreams a reality.

Do not let failure be the killer of your dreams and remember that failure is the road to success!

It’s very complicated these days to just be yourself, but as Steve Jobs said: follow your heart and intuition and be who you want to be and not what somebody else want, it is you and only you that will live your life anyway right?.

But I know, it is very easy to be contaminated by the society in which we are living and without losing ourselves, don’t you think so?. And you get in those moments where you don’t know who you really are and what are you really doing here.

The problem is that we look without really seeing, we don’t live, we just exist.

We don’t let ourselves be who we really want to be, and why? because of one of the most lethal things that exist in this world:

FEAR

Fear of what?

Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of what other people will think about us.

”The greatest prison that people lives in is the fear of what other people think.”

We think we are free, but we are not. We live in an invisible prison, that we create with our thoughts. That’s why we don’t let ourselves be whoever we wanted to be.

We dream, we wish, but we don’t believe, we just believe in what other people say, if they say that what you want is hard to get and impossible and that you are crazy for even thinking about it, you believe it, you accept those words as a reality, and you start being what society tell you to be, forgetting who you really are.

I know that you already know what you want to become in this world, maybe you are not 100% conscious about that, but there is something that you love to do, that makes you smile and makes you enjoy life in a way you have never experienced before. I guess that you have felt that many times before, and that is being your true self, that is saying to the world you know what? This is what makes me happy, This is who I really am!

It’s unbelievable how we limit ourselves by not following our heart and intuition. We do what we are supposed to do, because they tell you that there is no other way to live. You have to do the right things at the right time, if you want a happy life. But if it were like that, why most of the people in this world are not happy?

Because we do what someone else told us to do and not what we really wanted to do.

We live as if we will live forever, letting everything for tomorrow, but no matter what you have done in this life, we all end in the same place someday.

So break the walls of fear that are around you, don’t be trapped any more by others opinions, remember that somebody else’s opinions don’t have to become your reality.

”Your life is yours, live it!”

Life goes too fast to waste it, there is so many beautiful things, and there is so much to be grateful and happy for.

So go out, live the life that you always wanted, be the person you always wanted to be, be a voice and not an echo, give to others what you want to receive and above all:

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, this is actually what we really are. A beautiful human beings, with the ability to be and get whatever we want, and we have the power to change other people lives, and our lives and so… The entire world!

”The problem is, that we think we have time.” – Buddha

So the time is now, don’t wait until you don’t have it anymore. So enjoy the present, is what we have right now and nothing else, and if you want to see the future, see what you are doing now, do not let things for tomorrow, there may be no tomorrow.

Today is the day to be happy, to celebrate, to be grateful, to have joy, to feel love and be just yourself.!

Everything is possible, we can make our dreams come true, but we must believe in ourselves, because a dream is just a dream and it will always be that if we don’t do anything to change that!

Since we were born we have been blessed with the most wonderful gift we can ever have…

The gift of life

You came to this wonderful place to be the most amazing person you can ever been, you came to have it all, you came to discover who you really are and who do you want to be and you have all the resources to have the life of your dreams, but for some reason we just make this amazing life look like a horrible place…

and why? Why having it all to make this place a paradise we just want to keep saying that life is a nasty place? Why?

Because people have a special passion:

The passion for suffering!

I mean I’m serious, because with one thought just one single thought you can change everything, with a wonderful feeling, that feeling called:

Love: love for everything around you.

”We came to love and be loved.”

If you just can have love and give love to every single person and thing around you, you can transform this place into a paradise, you will find the true happiness, if you just can feel gratitude for everything, every single day, every single second of your life, for everything you got, you have and you will have and I swear that you can transform this place into heaven, you can have it all, all you ever dreamed of, you just have to believe, believe in you, believe that everything is out there waiting for you to start believing! You must be happy and grateful for everything you already have and you have to love yourself with all your heart so then you can love everyone, and I’m saying every one! Not only your wife, husband, children, girlfriend, boyfriend, family or friend, every single person in this world! See? We can just live in heaven but not, we don’t and why?

Because we don’t believe, we only focus in what we don’t want, in what we hate, in how hard life is and how disgusting is and why?

Like I said we just don’t believe in the things that look too good, we just think: Oh no there must be something wrong with that! Is not possible, magic doesn’t exist, just accept that life is horrible! So when you have the possibility to have the job of your dreams and earn the money you ever wanted, you just think: Oh no! it sounds too good, I can’t have it, dreams can’t come true or you found the love of your life but what do you think? She/he must be lying in some point, She/he can’t be so perfect or amazing, She/he will probably hurt me one day and I will be devastated, so what do you do with all those fears and thoughts?

”You create your own reality.”

You just make your thoughts come true, you make your dreams be only that.. Dreams for ever and nothing else, you can make it true! But no, people doesn’t want to because people don’t believe, they don’t love themselves so they think they can’t have it all because you think you don’t deserve it just because you don’t love yourself and because you don’t love yourself you can’t love other and others can’t love you, so you are back again in your horrible reality thinking life is horrible, life is suffering, I can’t have it all, dreams can’t come true, love doesn’t exist, so you just conform yourself with nothing, with a horrible life, with a job you don’t want, with a relationship that sucks because you just think you can’t have better things and only because you only want to believe that life is like that, you leave everything to destiny, to luck and to whatever you think, you complain about everything and you keep living as life was a fortune wheel where someone can have a wonderful life, a wonderful family, friends, the love of their dreams, the money, the job and anything their ever wanted and that you have been the unlucky one and that you have to accept it.

But let me tell you something, you make your own reality, you can have it all, you can have the life of your dreams, the love of your life, the best friends in the world, the job you ever wanted, everything!

Just start believing in it!

”Believe you can and you are halfway there.”

And don’t forget to love yourself and love anyone around you, give love every single day of your life because if you don’t give it, how are you going to have it then?

Be grateful for every single thing you have and you will have and for every single person around you who makes the life a better place!

Be happy and grateful for what you got, for what you have, for what you will have, love with all your heart, believe that the things you want are there waiting for you and believe that dreams can come true, if you really want!

”There is always something to be grateful for.”

You have everything you want, is just there in front of your eyes believe and you will see it! Believe that good things are not possible and continue with your life and thinking that life is suffering, that your job has to be the worst thing, that you can’t earn the money you want and that you relationship has to be horrible, that you have to suffer and cry and be sad, because everyone says that life is like that!

So, if you don’t want that reality anymore, start believing now and you will see that everything is possible, that you deserve the best in the world, that you deserve to be happy, you deserve to be loved and anything you want!

Believe and you will see what you can’t see, Believe and you will be happy for ever, Believe and you will make your dreams come true!