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and I agree to receive updates and marketing messages from time to time from Josh Groban and his record label.

The Verdict...

So last night Marshall had some people over for a wine night. I texted him when he got out of rehearsal, half an hour before he told people to come over, and he picked me up. At his apartment I got up enough nerve to tell him I needed to talk with him but that it would have to wait until a time when people wouldn't be walking in and out. So the evening went on...

Finally, a little after two, it was just Marshall, Drea (his roommate), Lily and I left. Drea and Marshall got into this long conversation of past relationships and the difference between loving someone and being in love. This scared me a bit, but I knew I still had to tell him last night or I never would. Lily fell asleep and lives in the same small hall as I do so Marshall walked both of us back. Outside our hall (Blackstock) there was a small party. Last night had also been "beer-mas" at the Porch and people were just coming back from that. We talked to some people on our porch for a bit, talking Lily into bed and some drunk people from driving to McDonald's (what is it with altered states and the need for fast food?)Marshall then gestured me into the front lounge and asked what was up. I admitted to him how I felt. He told me he wasn't surprised, he had actually had his suspicions for six months. That surprised me, actually. And then he said that Autumn was a bad liar but that conversation had got him thinking about us. If it had been two and a half months before or after this point he would have already asked me out. He just gets so consumed by his work that there's hardly room for a relationship (he's the director of the fall lab show that goes up in October). After a few more minutes he asked if I could take a walk. We paced the campus for hours, discussing how we felt about the situation. He told me a lot of stuff about him that I already knew. After all, I've been his close friend for over a year now. But hearing it again, in that context, made it useful.

So it all came down to what we wanted. He asked me that question point blank. There's no lying to him so I told him the truth-I wanted a relationship. He said that if I was ok with how he is that he'd be willing to try. What kind of statement is that? I know how he is but I love him despite what he perceives as flaws. He accepted that and now we're giving it a shot.

It blew anything I had ever dared to hope for way out of the water. Excuse the language, but holy shit. :D

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