Words from the pulpit of the First Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Palm Beaches, and other significant messages.

Monday, December 2, 2013

Because It's Sunday

One of my favorite films is Torchsong
TrilogyMy inner prude may be
surfacing when I say bits may be too racy for our First Friday Film Festival, but I
recommend you watch it.It is a delight
to watch Anne Bancroft and Harvey Firestein, members of a Jewish family living
in New York City.Bancroft’s character,
the mother, is grieving the death of her husband.While sitting Shiva, a time for mourning in
the Judaic tradition, her gay son, played by Firestein, expresses to his mother
that he is worried about her and asks what she is going to do.Mother is explaining where the family will be
laid to rest.

“Thank you for coming on
such an awful day. I'll be herebetween
your father and your grandfather.Phil,
you're here with your wife and children. Tateleh, over here with your wife and
children.And you. You will be here
with…. A nice girl, who knows?”

“Believe
me, Ma, I know.”

“God doesn't know.My son knows!”

A guest asks “Why are the mirrors covered?”

Mother answers“So we don't see the pain in our faces.”

“Why are you sitting on boxes?”

“ To make
sure there's pain in our faces.”

“Ma,
What will you do?Are you going to keep the house?”

Mother replies “I'll teach out the term,put the house up for sale, and go live in
Florida.”“Why Florida? Phil and I are
here.”

“That's what we do. We go to
Florida.My mother did it. That's what
we do.We go to Florida.”

“ I don't care what "WE" do.What do you want to do?”

Mother replies “I want to die.Till then, I'll go to Florida. Its what we
do.”

I find this exchange not only hilarious but
intriguing.The act of moving to Florida
has become the norm, a ritual.It’s
rarely questioned.It simply is.Years ago I stood at the stove preparing
dinner and found myself eavesdropping on a phone conversation between my son,
Antonio, and a friend.Apparently
Antonio’s friend was trying to make plans and lure him away for a Sunday
morning.Likely another trip to the
mall.I overheard Antonio say “I can't.”The friend must have asked “why not?”Antonio responded “because I’m going to
church.”His friend must have asked “why
are you going to church?”Antonio
responded “because it's Sunday.”

Because it's Sunday.Of course.What an interesting answer.Never
mind the theology behind it.It was
simply what we do.Antonio knows that
Sunday morning, in the case of my family, is carved out for worship.No questions asked. It’s what we do.

This raised some questions for me.Why do I go to church?Why is it so important to me?Richard and I seek out UU Churches if we are
traveling or on vacation.Why?Why do we go out of our way to gather on
Sunday morning with fellow UU’s?I’ve
come up with some answers.Some are
obvious.The answer that touched me
most was that I am blessed to have the opportunity to retreat to church.Church is my sanctuary.As Unitarian Universalists one of the rituals
we can claim is attending worship, finding sanctuary, each Sunday.

A sanctuary is a safe haven.A safe place.A place for living, loving, hospitality, protection, and where we can
encounter the sacred — whatever and whomever that may be.“A place removed from the distraction,
stress, and tawdriness of the rest of the world” says the Rev.Fred Small.A place as described in Taoist text, where we can all relieve people in
distress as speedily as you must release a fish from a dry rill lest it
die.A place where we can deliver people
from danger as quickly as you must free a sparrow from a tight noose.

The notion of sanctuary is ancient.In Christian scripture, in the Gospel of Matthew,
we are told “for where two or three are gathered in my name, I am among them.”In the Qur’an “Hold fast, all together, to
God’s rope, and be not divided among yourselves.Let there arise out of you one community,
inviting all that is good, enjoining what is right.”Sixteenthcentury Unitarian preacher, Francis David tells us “We need not think
alike to love alike.”

What is striking
about these examples of sanctuary in scripture and writings is that all give us
an invitation to step inside and to gather.Gathered in my name -- all together and not divided -- one community -- love
alike.Our gathering places become holy,
sacred, and places of love.All describe
a united community that rejects all that is wrong with the world and help us
envision a blessed place, a sanctified place, a sanctuary of compassion.

These ancient texts and writings create a
message that is eternal -- that is the
places we create to gather, to worship, to serve, to learn, to laugh, to cry,
to celebrate, to mourn, and to love are our sacred spaces.Spaces set aside within a fractured world
where we can find shelter and safety.For us, this space, is that space.

UU minister, the Reverend Tom Schade, is a dear
friend and writes a blog called the
Lively Tradition.You may have seen
some of his posts on our Facebook page.Last week he wrote something that I’ve been thinking about.He writes “If I was really cynical and
smart-alecky, I would say the UUism is a collection of book clubs which can
never decide what book to read but still gather for the cookies, coffee and
conversation.Maybe that works, but it
is hiding the light under a bushel basket.”What is he saying exactly?

I
believe he’s saying that we need to get out of our own way, put down the
banners of indecision, contest, ego, and string up the saving lights of
Unitarian Universalism.He’s saying that
by hiding our light under a basket, which can be viewed as a metaphor for all
that holds us back, we become nothing more than a club.A club where inspiration, love, justice,
positive interpersonalrelationships,
and vision to change our community and the world are strangers.

I’m grateful to have this place to come to each
week.Like you I spend a lot of my time
outside of here being hassled and left disappointed by the false sense of
sanctuary that lurks in other places of my life.Here is a surprising truth.Sanctuary isn't necessarily just a place.It can be a way of being.

Years ago I was the Director of Religious
Education for an urban New England UU church.I remember an annual meeting that I attended.A typical annual meeting with the reports and
decisions you might expect.The meeting
turned vicious when it came time to elect officers for the Board.Each candidate was given a couple of minutes
to introduce themselves and their intent.Before the candidate for treasurer could introduce herself a band of
members interrupted the process to let the congregation know the mental health
history of this particular candidate.The deepest and most personal part of this woman’s life was being laid
out in an attempt to discredit her.The
humiliation was heartbreaking.How dare
anyone, anyone, be so bold as to think this was acceptable.Particularly with a group of UU’s who have
principles that direct them otherwise.As far as I am concerned the group bent on tearing down their UU sister
were behaving violently.Greed, ego,
fear of not getting what they wanted when they wanted led them to
violence.As you might expect the
meeting fell apart.The woman could not
be consoled, was embarrassed, humiliated and left to die by those who committed
not to harm her.Years later,The congregation continues to struggle with
issues born at that meeting.

This is an example of the way we relate to one
another, a way of being, that brings the evil, the violence, the hassle outside
of our doors into our house.The way in
which we treat and regard one another, the way in which we embrace one another
creates sanctuary.If one of us chooses
to dishonor and attack our sense of sanctuary then none of us shall have it.We are reminded of the reality of sanctuary
and how we can be responsible to create it or dismantle it.We are yanked out of place by the realities
and cruelties of life.We desire true
sanctuary.

It is not a coincidence I offer you these
words.As your minister, as your
developmental minister, it is my task to hold up elephants in the room.You will soon find that I am fearless in
naming the elephants.And you will
find that when I name an elephant I also offer a way to lead that elephant out
of our house in a way that is safe and in a way that causes no harm.There is an elephant in our house.We have been bruised by ministry and one
another.Elephants and violence have no
room in our house.Their reservations
have been cancelled.Join me in leading
this particular elephant out.We need
the room.You see there is a train
coming through our house.A train that
we will board and move slowly toward our destination of greatness, of a
healthier congregation, a train where no boarding pass is required.There is room for everyone, our ideas, our
opinions, our differences, our commonalities.

However, there is one requirement.Today we commit ourselves to taking the journey to our destination.Today we decide that there is no need to fear
that we are losing something, today we decide to transform our anxieties into
work that will lay the track for our train.Today we decide to live our affirmation versus simply reciting it.Today we decide to dwell together in peace,
to seek the truth in love, and to help one another.

Say yes to love, life, and truth.These walls keep hate out and hold love
in.May our theology, have no room for
judgment.I cannot promise you that you
will be saved by Christ and I cannot offer you the notion of hell as a reality
and to save yourself.But I can promise
you this.Returning to sanctuary will
save us.We will be saved froma chaotic, and frightening world.Though we claim our ritual for a short time
each week I promise you we will leave with peace---inner peace that will hold
us for the week ahead.I take seriously
the responsibility to make sure you are offered a message within the sermon
that gives you something to hold onto .It is imperative that we reclaim gathering together for our true selves
and avoid being robbed by ego, disagreement, and fear.

Listen to the words of our second hymn: O come you longing thirsty souls, drink
freely from the spring.And come you
weary, famished folk, and end your hungering.Why spend yourself on empty air? Why not be satisfied?For everywhere a feast is spread that’s
always at your side.

Now is the time, in this place, for us to heal,
to care for all souls, to seat ourselves at the banquet that has been
spread.Let joy, acceptance, love,
reason, celebration of difference replace the aching to belong, indifference,
and lonelinessof our lives.Let us step out of the storm and on to the
train and into the warmth of holy embrace.Let us allow one another to escape the ill will and pain and make this
place sacred.Because, after all its
Sunday.

May it be so.

Because
its Sunday, a sermon delivered
by the Rev. CJ McGregor at the First Unitarian Universalist Congregation of the Palm Beaches on August 18,
2013