not just a piece of me but all of me

Mama and me time

My husband is not good with babies. They can’t talk, walk, or wipe their own butt and sometimes their needs can be quite ridiculous. My first son had colic, and could only be soothed if you held him under his armpits and made a circular motion with your arms like you were rowing a boat. It was awful! We seriously contemplated only having one child because of the severity of the colic.
Our second son does not have colic and is a happy baby for the most part under one condition; he must be held ALL the time. Compared to rowing for hours, carrying a baby is a walk in the park. However, if my husband has a choice between carrying a baby or running around with a toddler, he will pick a toddle every single time. Maybe that first three months of colic with our first just really ruined the baby experience for him or babies are just not his forte.
Anyways, yesterday my husband took the baby for Mother’s day so I could be with my toddler. We went grocery shopping, made muffins, went to the arcade, and watched a movie. These are things I normally do on the weekend but it was special to my toddler this time because I did not have the baby. My toddler kept telling me it was “mamma and me time” and “just the two of us” and “I love you so much” It melted my heart to know he was having so much fun with me but at the same time I felt guilty. I felt guilty because I have been forcing him to share his time with me with his baby brother. While I’ve been busting my hump, ensuring that all of the baby’s needs were met I neglected to see that my toddler needed me. My toddler may not need me all of the time, but some of the time he needs more than just a piece of me, sometimes he needs all of me. It comforts me to know that he is so selfless that he can share me with his baby brother but I need to make more of an effort to give him all of me when he needs me.