Nowruz, 13 Bedar, and April Fools Day

The 13-Bedar or “Sizdah Bedar” that means the Thirteenth [Day] out of doors is the last day of Nowruz holidays. We have already written about ’13 Bedar’, its history and its traditions. The 13-Bedar often coincides with the first day of April, which is known as April Fools Day in the West. In fact, the Iranian “13 Bedar” and Dorogh Sizdah (The lie of Thirteen), that is the oldest prank-tradition in the world, is the root of April Fools Day in the West. Since the ancient times, Iranians have believed that laughter and joy are coming from the angels of Goodness and the bad thoughts are coming from the Devil, Ahriman, and the joyful ceremonies will cleanse all bad thoughts. They celebrated Sizdah Bedar and many other ancient ceremonies, and thought in this way they helped the Goodness prevail over the earth in the struggle against the Evil. The “Sizdah Bedar” and its traditions can show you the true image of Iran, as one of the main cradles of civilization in the world. In the recent decades, the Western media always told big shameful lies about Iran, Iranians and the main supporters the Mullahs. They didn’t say that the Mullahs are the main enemy of the Iranian culture and the Iranian ancient traditions, and the West has been the main supporter of the Mullahs and the Islamists in Iran. But in 2009, and in the past two years, the wise people in all around the world could see the truth. In 1979, many Iranians were stupid and ignorant, and they helped the West, but we should not forget that in the 1900s, i.e. 80 years before 1979 and when the number of ignorant people in Iran and the world was larger than 1979, Iranians fought against the Mullahs and the Monarchists, and the ordinary people killed a high rank Mullah and a grand Ayatollah who was the main enemy of freedom and democracy, and expelled King. In the recent years, all wise people can see that the main problem of Iran is the traitors and mercenaries, not the people. So, this year lets write some 13 Bedar news about the main problem. The 13 Bedar News, like the 13 Bedar News in the last year, are part of the oldest prank-tradition in the world.

As we said before, recently the American jerks in the American media cared about Reza Papeh (Reza the idiot). In his recent interview with the American media (Radio Farda) Reza Papeh (Reza Pahlavi), who is a 50+ idiot, said that he has had no job in his life and he still gets money from his mommy! As you know his mommy and daddy are brutal dictators who stole more than $60 billion from Iran. The people reporters say: “In the 13 Bedar, Reza Papeh’s (Reza Pahlavi) office declared that he wants to find a job for himself and he will stop getting money from his mommy. Reza Papeh has said: ‘I know that it’s really shameful that you get money from your mommy at the age of 50, and it’s really embarrassing that you have no job and no profession in your life. So, I decide to become a cab driver. I think I have a good IQ and I can become a good cab driver, of course after special trainings. In the future I want to become Iran’s driver, so I start my job as a cab driver, and I hope I can become a good driver. I hope the US officials choose me as Iran’s driver in the future. I have a special message for my mommy: ‘Mommy, please stop supporting me. I want to become a real man at the age of 50’. It should be added that after this brilliant message, tens of Reza Papeh’s supporters in LA, California, said that Reza Papeh’s message is a new beginning for Iran and the whole world”. In Sizdah Bedar, the people media also added: “Before releasing his message, Reza Papeh (Reza Pahlavi) asked his mommy: ‘Mommy, can I become King?’, and his mommy said: “Maybe. I give you money, and you spend it on the journalists, and I hope they can aid you in becoming king’. Reza Papeh: ‘But mommy, they get our money but they often defend the Mullahs and other people. I don’t like it’. Mommy: ‘the journalists are paid by the Mullahs and others, too. But when you become king, they only will kiss your ass. Don’t worry’. Reza Papeh: ‘Mommy, I want to become a cab driver, and I think the people would love this idea and they aid me in becoming their king. In this way, we don’t need to pay the journalists’. Mommy: ‘Oh, my little retard, I mean, my little reza, I don’t know If I die, who would give you money. I wish the US makes you king before my death. Otherwise, you will be a cab driver until your death'”.

In the 13 Bedar, the people reporters also reported: “The wife of Mehdi Yahyanejad, known as Mr. Balatarin, officially apologized to Iranians for what she called “the shameful behavior of my husband, that now I should call him my ex-husband, because I want to divorce him”. She added: “Many think that my husband has got a lot of money from Reza Papeh (Reza Pahlavi) and other Monarchists, but it’s wrong. He just got about $350,000 from Reza Papeh, and compared to the money he got from the Mullahs and the Americans in 2009, it’s really nothing”. When the reporters asked her how much money Mr. Balatarin has got for his mercenary jobs, she said: “I can’t tell you the exact amount. All I could say is that a poor Basji has become a millionaire, and you all know who paid him, and how he and his friends betrayed the people and their movement. I only can apologize to you, all Iranians, and I hope the people can forgive me, and I promise that I will be the first Iranian who sues Mr. Balatarin for betraying the people. The stupid mercenaries like my husband have no shame. They are ‘Human Stain’. I’m very sorry”. The people reporters also added: “Mehdi Yahyanejak’s wife asked Nikahang Kosar’s wife to tell the truth about his husband. And Nikahang Kosar’s wife made a short speech and left the room quickly. She said: ‘I’m very sorry that my husband, Kosar, is an Islamist crook who lives by betraying the people. I want to divorce him, and you should know that he has got about $200,000 form the Mullahs, about $250,000 form the Monarchists and Reza Papeh’s office, and about $50,000 form the Americans. I’m very sorry that I was the wife of a political prostitute. Please forgive me'”.

Some media had a special 13 Bedar news. They said: “In the Sizdah Bedar, Masoud Behnoud’s son, Ebrahim Nabavi’s daughters, Akbar Ganji’s daughter, Khatami’s son and Abbas Abdi’s daughter published a joint statement. They said: ‘We all very sorry that our fathers are mercenaries. We know what we ate in the past two years were the people’s blood. We apologize to all Iranians. We know that our fathers have become symbols of traitors and mercenaries, and the people hate them very much, but we are not like our fathers, and we hate them as well. The people should know when Masoud Behnoud bought a new house for his son, he rejected it and clearly said: ‘Oh, dad, I don’t want to live in this house that you bought it by the mercenary money. How can I live in this bloody house, when every inch of it reminds me of the martyrs, their blood, and the people you betrayed them. How can you eat the people’s blood, dad? You always want to live in luxury by betraying the people and the principles. I’m sorry that I’m the son of a lifelong mercenary. You are a lifelong mercenary, man. Be proud of yourself”. And the last words of Abbas Abdi’s daughter to his father were: ‘Daddy, shame on you. You still work for the Mullah Gestapo but pretend that you care about freedom and democracy. You tell big shameful lies about the martyrs, the people movement, the election boycott, or what the people want and many other things, because you want to live in luxury at any price. You know that if Iran becomes a free country, the people don’t care about you and your friends, and you would be tried for your betrayals in the past 30 years. I asked you to apologize to Iranians, and I thought the people would forgive you, but you just are telling more big shameful lies, and prove that you deserve no mercy. Now, not only the people, but even your daughter can’t forgive you. You are a stupid mercenary, daddy'”.

In “13 Bedar”, almost all cities in Iran look empty and unpopulated. This year, the people celebrate Nowruz and “13 Bedar” while they talk about War, new Sanctions, air pollution, the Western Hypocrisy, traitors and mercenaries, Mr. Stupid Monkey (Obama), etc. Now, many people say that the West is the number one enemy of Iran and freedom and democracy, and the West and Mr. Stupid Monkey (Obama) only want to destroy Iran by the help of their Iranian puppets, i.e. the Mullahs, the Monarchists, and other Iranian baboons. If 2012 had been like 1979, and about 70% of Iranians had been illiterate and lived in the rural areas, the West would have been succeed in implementing their evil plans, but 2012 is not like 1979. Now, the young Iranians (75% of Iranians are -35, and 85% of Iranians are -45) are modern and educated, at least as much as their western counterparts. About 75% of Iranians live in the urban areas, and more than 20 millions of Iranians are university-educated people. In the past 33 years, Iran has changed a lot, and it looks like 300 years, not 33 years, because now the majority of Iranians are anti-Islamists and modern, and the number of religious fanatics, stupid lefts, and their supporters in the US is much more than Iran, and it’s a very important and meaningful change. The main resource of today’s Iran is not its oil and gas resources, that is the number one in the world, but it’s “human resources”. Some say: “the wise and modern Iranians will convert Iran into a modern country, on a level of Germany and UK”, and some add: “if the West proves that it’s so hypocrite, Iranians will restore the Greater Persia, by uniting the occupied parts of Persia and by establishing the United States of Persia“. Unfortunately, many Westerners still are racist or chauvinist, like their savage ancestors in the Slavery Age and the Colonialism Age. As we said before, Persia was a great country before the 19 century, when the UK and Russia occupied many parts of it. But unfortunately, instead of thinking about all humans and the whole world, many stupid Westerners still live in the 19 century. They still are racist and chauvinist. But now, the racist and chauvinist people only prove that they are uncultured people on the wrong side of history.

The ancient Iranian traditions can show you the real image of Iran. But unfortunately, the bad people in the West still live like their savage ancestors who told the biggest shameful lies and did the most shameful works. Unfortunately, many Westerners still are racist and chauvinist, and unfortunately, they have the upper hand in the West, and with the help of the fake intellectuals, they still betray the freedom and democracy and other human values and human legacies in all around the world. It’s really shameful and embarrassing. The stupid people don’t read history, and only repeat history. Unfortunately, the number of stupid people in the US and Europe is not small, and it’s very dangerous and very disappointing. I hope the wise people and the good people in the US and Europe don’t close their eyes, and can see the main problems before it’s too late. It’s really embarrassing that today’s top intellectuals in the US and Europe are stupid jerks who defend the tyranny and the savage tyrants in the name of independence or fighting against imperialism. These fake intellectuals don’t fight against imperialism, but they strengthen imperialism by defending the enemies of freedom and democracy. They pretend that they defend independence, but all wise people know that in the absence of freedom and democracy, there is no independence, or independence is very dangerous like Stalin’s independence or Hitler’s independence. In fact, those who defend the tyranny and the brutal dictators in the name of independence, not only are the main enemies of freedom and democracy, but they are enemies of true independence. You can ask yourself: “Why you can’t find any known intellectual or known figure in the West who protests against both the brutal dictators and the greedy capitalists/ imperialists? Is it purely accidental that the stupid jerks like Chomsky, that defend the tyranny and the brutal dictators, are symbols of ‘anti-Capitalism’ and ‘anti-Imperialism’? Is it purely accidental that the wise people who know the main problems, and protest against the tyranny, the brutal dictators, the anti-freedom forces and the bad people in the US and all around the world are boycotted and almost all of them are unknown or isolated? Is it purely accidental that the Western mass media only care about the stupid lefts and some one like Chomsky and introduce them as ‘intellectual’ or alternative”? Think about it. It’s one of the main problems in the West, more important than TSA and many other problems. We would write more about it later. But “13 Bedar” or April Fools Day is a good day for thinking about fools, and who is who is this shitty world.

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This entry was posted on Saturday, March 31st, 2012 at 7:00 pm and is filed under Persian History and Culture. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.
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