I had just spent a week in Ireland last year and was driving to the airport at Cork around 4:30 in the morning. About 40 minutes into the drive, "it" struck (if you know what I mean). Well, I had to pull over rather quickly and ended up squatting behind a hedge a little ways off a country road. Lucky for me I had some paper towels and hand sanitizer with me.

Oh, and if you're a farmer in county Cork and stepped in a big pile last year, I'm really sorry.

Quoting TedTAce (Reply 4):I also (unfortunately) witnessed someone pinching a loaf @ Haulover beach in Miami. You should have seen the crowd around the water clearing out as the 'floater' drifted down the beach

That reminds, lol. We were on the lake with one of Ted's kin, this really nasty fat guy. He had to lay a log, and you don't go in just for that. So, he got in the water and did the deed while hanging on to the boat. Mind you he was wearing a gigantigous t-shirt.

The turd had floated up into his shirt, swear to Yahweh, and when we pulled him out of the water, it vaccum sealed the turd to his back! Needless to say, Pale Face, as he is called, got a few gratuitous slaps on the back. Of course, you can't have doo-doo in the boat, so after a few minutes we informed him of his ass leech.

In the geographic center of Matagorda Bay whilst fishing. Thankfully, it was just me and the guys, so they just faced the other way and laughed. I had to drop trou, hold on to the wheelhouse and stick my pasty-white arse as far out as I could, and drop logs. Knowing our sensitive bowels, we thought ahead and brought TP.

I've quite nearly soiled my car many times trying to make it to the house for "home field advantage." Several of those trips involved much bargaining with God, traffic code violations and a "photo finish" ending.

outside in the yard of someone else's home when they werent home... in a forest preserve... in the snow (caution. melts snow). ive also done it in a plastic bag and when i was done, i threw it in the road and watched it get run over many many times and laughed my ass off.

The bushes beside a Greek freeway. I was on a school trip and for almost the whole time had been suffering from severe stomach problems, but always managed to find a potty. But then, on the last day in the bus on the way to airport, I just had to get out because my stomach hurting like hell and I had to doo something. Thankfully, it was still early in the morning and pretty much all of my classmates were sleeping in the bus .

Quoting TedTAce (Reply 4):I also (unfortunately) witnessed someone pinching a loaf @ Haulover beach in Miami. You should have seen the crowd around the water clearing out as the 'floater' drifted down the beach (EEEWWWW)

I have unfortunately seen the aftermath of a few well placed bombs. One of my personal best was doing it in the back of a shipping container. I couldn't make it anywhere else, and this was the most private. I witnessed someone once placing a bag of something into a box of chicken sitting on the dock. It was to be shipped to somewhere across the seas - Russia? I asked the guy what he put in the box, and it ended up being a turd he just birthed. I imagine whoever opened that box had a suprise. I think the whole load was "fouled".

A few years ago while running here on a Toronto city street in daylight.

I do alot of long distance running and one day I went out for a run with a <100% feel-good stomach. I had a spontaneous *event* in my white running lycra (thank God I was wearing running shorts over top). It oozed out the bottom of my form-fitting once-white lycra and down my legs to my ankles as I ran home. I took off my t-shirt to clean up my legs which really did not help, as now I had to run with a soiled t-shirt in my hand. The worst part was the warm squishy feeling as I ran home in those very tight once-white form-fitting lycra.

Getting home presented another problem as I had to somehow make it up to my condo unit with s**t running down my legs, a soiled butt, and a soiled t-shirt. I'm sure I was very fragrant.

Realistically, no one likely noticed what happened. Although I felt exposed.

Quoting Yyz717 (Reply 23):A few years ago while running here on a Toronto city street in daylight.

I do alot of long distance running and one day I went out for a run with a <100% feel-good stomach. I had a spontaneous *event* in my white running lycra (thank God I was wearing running shorts over top). It oozed out the bottom of my form-fitting once-white lycra and down my legs to my ankles as I ran home. I took off my t-shirt to clean up my legs which really did not help, as now I had to run with a soiled t-shirt in my hand. The worst part was the warm squishy feeling as I ran home in those very tight once-white form-fitting lycra.

Getting home presented another problem as I had to somehow make it up to my condo unit with s**t running down my legs, a soiled butt, and a soiled t-shirt. I'm sure I was very fragrant.

Realistically, no one likely noticed what happened. Although I felt exposed

That is sooooo funny!!

25 EmiratesA345
: I'm sure people would have noticed the shit stain on the back of your "once-white" shorts, don't you think? Mark