"Totally coup, yo."

I’m not convinced

BY FORREST OAK

Good evening. I’m Forrest Oak.

There’s a lot being made over this BP “oil spill” down in the Gulf. A lot of green-mongering. A lot of the same old Chicken Little routine we’ve seen coming out of the Gore-ista camp, for the last 700 years in this country. And, frankly, it’s just a whole mess of environmentalist bed-wetting.

Is anyone asking the tough questions? I mean, besides me. I’m Forrest Oak. For instance, is there really scientific consensus that this “spill” exists? And if there is scientific consensus on its existence, can we say with absolute certainty that it is man-made? It seems a little egotistical to think that humans could affect their environment on such a large and catastrophic scale. Some things are just not within our power. Now, if God wants to release a million gallons of oil into the Gulf of Mexico – if oil spills really exist – then that is within his divine power. But to suggest we could do that? Pure arrogance.

No! To answer my question from earlier. No one is reporting on the scientific uncertainties of the oil spill except for me. I’m Forrest Oak. That’s because I’m not beholden to the corporate lobbyists. I’m not employed by any of the companies that stand to profit from “cleaning up” the “oil spill.” I’m not “employed” by anyone. I’m just a man blogging from a bus station. I’m Forrest Oak.

“Oh, I’ve seen videos and photos,” you say. Videos can be faked. Photos can be altered. Ever hear of Photoshuup? It’s like Photoshop, but much cheaper. I own a copy. I’m Forrest Oak. And in just five minutes, look at the “oil spill” I created on the moon:

Are you convinced? I wouldn’t be either. I’m Forrest Oak. I have a keen eye, for when someone’s pulling the wool over my eyes. It’s easy to see. It’s wool. And it’s right over your eyes. It’s being pulled over your eyes, too, America.

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