Vincent Margera Convicted of Sexual Assault

Â Vincent Margera - also known as "Don Vito" during his days on MTV's Viva La Bam - was convicted yesterday of two counts of sexual assault on a child.

The old, fat blob was accused of groping three girls, ages 12 to 14, during an autograph signing event last year at mall skate park in the Denver suburb of Lakewood. His defense?

That he was simply taking on the persona of the outrageous and profane Don Vito. How could he be punished for acting like a beloved character?

By that logic, can we pretend to be Tony Parker and not get in trouble for staring at Eva Longoria naked in the shower?

As soon as the guilty verdict was announced by the jury, the rotund Vincent Margera fell to the floor cursing and yelled, "Just kill me now!"

He now faces a sentence of probation to six years in prison on each conviction. After Margera's courtroom outburst, deputies restrained him and took him to jail, where he'll be held without bail until his sentencing hearing on December 20.

Vincent is the uncle of Bam Margera, who likely had sex with Jessica Simpson while she was still married to Nick Lachey.