Thursday, September 04, 2008

The other day the ex-partner-in-crime invited me out for a drinky, so we wandered over to a local pub. We sat down with our refreshments and on the table we'd chosen was a copy of a popular comic called The Sun. I decided to peruse it for a giggle and it certainly gave me a larf, especially this story.To quote, -

"A REGULAR has been banned from wearing his kilt down the pub after it was called “fancy dress”.Paul Robson, 47, who has put on the tartan outfit every Friday and Saturday for two years, said: “I’m staggered — it is completely racist.”The new owners of the Blackie Boy in Bigg Market, Newcastle, where he has enjoyed a pint for 17 years, acted after introducing a “smart dress code”.Paul, of Byker, added: “My kilt cost £1,700 and it is in the family tartan.“I wear it because I’m proud of my heritage, not as a joke.”The Scottish National Party’s Pete Wishart said: “It’s ludicrous to suggest a kilt is not smart and to compare it to fancy dress.”But the pub insisted: “Everyone gets refused entry in any fancy dress — that has nothing to do with kilts being Scottish.”

It's the last comment that cracks me up. If a kilt is not fancy dress and is an item of everyday wear, then surely it can not be classed as 'fancy dress' as the pub still calls it?Maybe it was because the kilt was a very smart one, as in the sort most folks would only wear to a wedding? Perhaps the chap would be better off wearing a more tattered and weather-beaten one that smelled vaguely of moss and cows?And if national dress such as kilts are classed as 'fancy', what about other cultures? Would someone wearing a sari be banned as the cloth is bright and shiny? How about a Sikh wearing full kit? Would a premier league footballer be turned away if he turned up in team colours, would a vicar popping in for a quick sherry be told there's no room at the inn?But, what do you think would happen if a very attractive, young woman wearing a kilt went into the pub? Basically the same outfit as the bloke, but with the shirt cut to show off a few curves, and the kilt hitched up a couple of inches.Think she'd get in?Of course she would.Just goes to show that 'the pub' is not just guilty of racial discrimination, but also should be up against the wall on a charge of fuc%wittery of the highest degree.If I get the chance I'm planning on paying the place a visit...

Dressed as the Pope.Anybody want to join me? I'll get a Beefeater's outfit and a Policeman's uniform for them to wear.