"Mr. President, I appreciate the offer, but it is the American People that need help, not me."

"John, that is what is so typical of you Republicans: If I made An Executive Action that gave free dog walks and car washes to all of the American people you would publicly slam me for being careless with the Government's money."

"With all due respect, Sir, it is not the Government's money, it comes from the People."

"You really believe that, John?

(mutual laughter)

"Of course not, Mr. President, us Republicans can have a sense of humor too, you know."

"See, look at us: we are making Progress."

"Ebony and Ivory, Sir."

"Oh yeah -- Stevie Wonder did that."

"And Paul McCartney, sir."

"Sure, sure: when a black man achieves something you have to bring up a white man to take it away."

"Mr. President, that is not what I meant. I meant that if we work together --"

"I'm the blind guy in this now, right?"

"Sir, how about we pretend that you are Stevie Wonder, but a Stevie Wonder that can see..."

"Look John, if I could make Stevie Wonder see by Executive Order don't you think I would've done it by now?"

"That is something all of America can agree on, sir."

"Truth be told, John, I'm kind of a Lionel Richie man, myself."

"Really? I thought you preferred Al Green."

"That's just for the ladies, John. In private I'm a 'Dancin' on the Ceiling' guy."

"Lionel Richie: wasn't he originally in 'Earth, Wind & Fire'?

"John: Lionel Richie was originally in 'The Commodores', not 'Earth, Wind & Fire'. Do all black music groups look alike to you?"

"Sir, I thinking we are getting away from the point..."

"Okay, okay. So what do I have to do to work with you: spring for some pork for your constituents? Show you that secret George Clooney sex-tape video?"

"George Clooney sex-tape video, Mr. President?"

"I knew that would catch your ear, John. All you Republicans talk about homosexuality being a sin, but -- when it comes down to it -- you'd all watch a film of George Clooney getting banged in the ass by Samuel L. Jackson. In a heartbeat."

"Sir I don't believe that is fair..."

"Who's talking about fair? You should see what Samuel L. Jackson does to George Clooney: he breaks him, man, he BREAKS him. Is that fair?

"Well... What people do in the privacy of their own homes--"

"It was filmed at a public bathroom in a park in Los Angeles. Rumor is George Michael was the one who filmed it. Real Hollywood decadent stuff."

"Sir. don't you have a problem from some of these decadent people donating money to you?"

"A problem at where the money comes from? I don't understand the question..."

Obama is being glib in the way we all expect progressives to be glib. It's a calculated insincerity intended to shut down serious probing into what concessions he would be willing to make -- because, of course, he isn't willing to make any.

What's going to happen is that the relevant agencies will now issue new regs, particularly about issue of work permits. That all is already probably in the pipeline. There will then be a big push among Latino political organizations to recruit applicants for the work permits. They will probably get funding for this effort. This will be VERY popular and will cement their position in that community. They intend to be the essential gatekeepers for this benefit.Latino political organization has been very loose and spotty till now as relatively speaking they have had little to offer. Unlike African-Americans there is no unifying anti-white resentment among Latinos, they are far more pragmatic. That is one thing this measure is intended to change, that's why there is so much eagerness among those people, which you all should have picked up on if you had been listening. Its their ride on a gravy train, and they hope, a permanent foundation for political power.

More than likely this is two lies for the price of one: 1. "I told John Boehner...". 2. "I'll walk your dog...". I suppose it could depend on what he thinks the meaning of "told" is, but making a speech about what you told someone is not actually the same as telling someone. Even if you make the same speech repeatedly.

Does Obama have the proper license to walk someone else's dog? Does he have a building with the proper zoning and business licenses to wash a car? What about the federal landscaper/housekeeper union? He is stealing their jobs!

Watched the noon re-run of Fox News Sunday again.#1. Chris Wallace hammering Ted Cruz about the terrible consequences for the Republicans the last time they "shut down the government."Cruz' responses very weak, even discounting for their bad connection, but for myself: Huh? What consequences? There was a large hubbub in the MSM echo chamber, but otherwise?That Jeanne Shaheen won her race against Scotty Brown carpetbagging from Massachusetts?

#2. Rep. Becerra gives a bad impression, and while it is true that the president has some leeway in choosing how to execute the laws, he must execute them. He can't just jump the fence and strike out on his own.

#3. Wallace mentioned to Texas' AG Abbott that he has filed more than 30 lawsuits against the president, and Abbott shot back, yeah, and he had won more than half of those suits.I did not know that, and I bet neither did you. Why is that?Abbott made a very good impression by the way.

#4. Ron Founier makes the most devastating comments about this administration of anyone on the FNC panel, and Fournier is a Democrat.

Thee were old, mothballed weapons. There was no active Iraqi NBC program, that's why W, Dick and Mr Unknown Unknowns didn't make a big deal of this junk when they found it. They did unnecessarily expose our troops and Iraqis to these toxins when they destroyed them by Open-Air detonation.

Obama is so insincere about stuff like this that there isn't much comedy to mine.

He's like one of those friends who's willing to do anything to help you out, but when you try to pin them down to actually, you know, help, then he's all like "Well, I'm busy that day" and "I got something else going on" another day, and so on. His initial offer sounds good and makes him feel better, but when push comes to shove he has absolutely no intention of helping.

"#1. Chris Wallace hammering Ted Cruz about the terrible consequences for the Republicans the last time they "shut down the government."Cruz' responses very weak, even discounting for their bad connection, but for myself: Huh? What consequences? There was a large hubbub in the MSM echo chamber, but otherwise?That Jeanne Shaheen won her race against Scotty Brown carpetbagging from Massachusetts?"

This argument has been tossed around a lot lately--that the GOP didn't have significant negative consequences when they shut down the government in 2013 or 1996, so of course they should go ahead and do it again. There's a few problems with that thinking:

1) What did either shutdown actually accomplish for the GOP? Did Clinton or Obama cave on anything? Did the shutdown actually help them win any subsequent elections?

2) If the answer is "no, they didn't accomplish anything but only because the GOP stopped the shutdown before it could pay dividends" then perhaps the fact that the shutdown was stopped before it began to really affect people also explains why the GOP wasn't "punished" for the shutdowns.

3) If the shutdown is no big deal because all it means are little things like national parks being closed and government workers staying home, then why would it be expected to accomplish anything?

4) I don't think I'd agree that there was "no consequence" for the GOP shutting down the government--true, they only lost a few seats in '96 in the House (and gained two in the Senate) but Clinton was able to tie Dole to the shutdown and while that wasn't the key reason Clinton got reelected, it didn't help Dole. And the more recent shutdown meant missing three extra weeks of news about Obamacare incompetence. If that could have calcified public opinion a little more against Obamacare, there's a better chance of overturning it eventually.

Not that a shutdown CAN'T be a good move for the GOP--when there's a genuine dispute over funding a shutdown may be a better strategy than a CR. But the GOP is at a natural disadvantage, as they will more often be blamed for it and most of the public doesn't like shutdowns.