Brilliant, just brilliant. I wondered though: am I reading correctly, that you're making "kin" and "demon" rhyme? It made me giggle because I adjusted by reading demon as "demyn", which sounded about right both in comparison to what I think "kin" sounds like, and in how you COULD be spelling demon in the days of yold. ;)

The nobility of Paladins was written with a non-capital n. I suspect there is a SNIDE REMARK hidden herein! I will have you know, dear dragon, that us paladins, particularly Knightly ones, are most Noble both from birth and in girth!

I think I loved the rhyme of land and marquis in command best. Because "Marquis in command" just spills out from the tongue like droplets of gold.