Thursday, April 21, 2016

Guess who's back! Yep.... It's me, The Homeless Finch. I went on an extensive sabbatical. Life and other's people's needs can get in the way. But I'm back to torture entertain and inform you like I've done in the past. What does this mean?? I don't know completely, but I do know that The Homeless Finch has been calling me back for a few months since I re-located to sunny Southern California and started a new life. I feel my creative juices starting to simmer and the whole culture of California lends itself to The Homeless Finch style pursuits! California, the home of upcycle, rejuvenate, renewal!!!

The image at the top of this post is a snapshot that I took of a few small yard sale finds last weekend. If you have followed my blog in the past, you might notice a little something called an owl in this pic. I found it at the first sale I stopped. It was hooting at me from the left and I couldn't resist it! Yes, it's gonna become white and join the others. But most importantly, I saw it as the universe directly saying to me, "Hello Lesley! It's time to get back to where you left off!" So here I am...

The house that I am renting has an awesome backyard studio that is waiting to be utilized, grounds that will allow me to stretch out and get creative and a climate that cannot be anymore perfect to pursue my passions! I'll share more about this in later posts. For now, I just wanted to say HELLO! I'm baaaaack!

If you remember me and are still following, please stop and give me a little comment of encouragement, or chastise me for my absence. Either way, I'd love to hear from you!

Friday, June 21, 2013

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary." - Steve Jobs

5 inch X 5 inch in gouache

Many of you know that I meet once a month with two of my favorite artist friends for a Studio Date. This past Tuesday was the day and although not all of us were in attendance, we met none the less. It's always a nurturing place we create filled with friendship and creativity. The image above is a snapshot of is the latest entry into the book of small works that are created during these meet ups.

My studio work has been developing over the last several months. It's gone in so many directions and I have allowed myself to explore every inclination. My goal with my Artist Date work has been simple: Just Allow. I've allowed my intuition to take over. Some of the avenues I have taken in my work, have been dead ends, but I have learned something on the path. Some of the paths I have taken have led to other turns and surprise trails along the way. Somehow, I continue to return to a similar place. But every time I return, I carry with me a little something new...a little shift in technique or imagery.

As Steve Jobs once said,

And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.

I've started to recognize the need to trust my gut in every aspect of my life. I believe that if we are to learn something from every experience we encounter in this life, it is that our gut is so much more important that someone else opinion. Knowledge is important and certainly we need to arm ourselves with information. But at some point, we all most let go and find the path by using our most valuable tool...our instinct.

I will be traveling the next couple of weeks, so if you write a blog and are accustom to me reading and commenting, Don't despair in my absence. I will return mid-July. Ha! I am hoping to be able to still post once a week if the mood hits me and I have some kind of imagery that I want to share. Stay cool!

Thursday, June 13, 2013

I believe that in the true inner sense of Motherhood lies the inability to ever be able to put yourself ahead of your child. You may try, but it never truly happens. You find yourself pretending to put yourself first only because you believe that it would be better for your child. In this moment, if you stop and feel it, you realize the strength of the bonds.

source unknown

My studio work has been a refuge for me during this tough time in my journey as of late. It has been a place to hide, a place to be my child self, a place to reflect and clear my thoughts. I am finding that sometimes it is hard to get in the studio and work because the weight of my life exhausts me, zapping me of my creative abilities and making it hard to paint. I know deep down that I need this time for me, but the struggle between the need to feed my soul and the realities of what is now expected of me are real and poignant. Barely a moment of the day passes without my knowledge of the presence of this underlying tension that exists daily in my life.

"Glimmer," 4 ft X 4 ft , acrylic on canvas

I was up past midnight last night, out in my studio ravenously working on this painting, even though the lighting was too dim and my eyes way too tired. I didn't care. I had run to a place that beckons me every moment, pushed by resentments of my life into a space that at one point, I fantasized of never from returning. I was in what I call my 'Thelma and Louise' mood...running away from my life on a trek across the country wondering if the cliff would stop me in my tracks. Knowing that for the love of my children, that I would return, not proceed over the abyss.

Some people say that I am strong and that I have proven this fact. I say that I am a Mother and have proven that fact. I have come to realize, at least for me, that being a Mother is an all or nothing circumstance. I'd go down with the ship to save my child. There is no letting go...there is no giving up. Some may dispute this...some may tell me that I am wrong. I have considered those things in the most raw and honest fashion. I have tried to walk away. I cannot and I have made the clear decision that letting go for me is not an option if I want to live the life I believe was intended to live.

I have had many hopeless days. I have hope-filled ones as well. The path that I am walking isn't one I ever imagined. There are days when I realize that yes...one person can be given more than they can handle. Some people are handed a more difficult journey than others. I am not so sure I will ever understand the reasons for this truth or why this is my plight. Deep in my heart I hold to hope. That little glimmer sustains me for now, even if it's just something I tell myself to help get me through the day. Who knows what tomorrow brings?