Sunday, July 11, 2004

More stories from the trade

Another story from my friend who mans the Hotpoint customer help line.
Cust: I've just taken delivery of my brand new Hotpoint washing machine. And it's bouncing around the kitchen.
Help: Yes that may be because you haven't removed the transit bolts from the machine>
Cust: Excuse me but I've just spent the last three hours removing the transit bolts.
Help: Three hours? It should only take three minutes.
Cust: well if your people hadn't tightened the bolts so tight I wouldn't have had to spend three hours chipping away at that concrete block to get the bolts out.

From my friend who runs an Electrical shop.
Little old lady walks in with leather handbag. "Can you fix this leather bag for me?
"I'm afraid not we don't do leather repairs this is an electrical shop. The shop you want is the shop next door. The shoe repair shop."
"I know that. But they're closed."

This is one of my own stories. I was called out to look at a single tub washing machine. It wouldn't wash. I lifted the lid and looked inside. It was full of concrete. Hmmm I turned to lady customer and asked.
"Is your husband doing any building work at the moment?"
"Yes as a matter of fact he was doing our new patio yesterday."
"Well he's been using your washer to mix his concrete."
"Wha.........? !?&@!! Wait til he gets home."

That's similar to the time a customer brought in her Braun Multipractic Food processor it was jammed. but only jammed because hubby had used it to mix two part epoxy resin.
Then there was the guy who took his electric shaver back to currys because "it was useless". The store assistant looked at it and plugged it in switched it on and the customer immediately said "What's that noise?"
Or the guy who came in with his shaver and a face all cut and scratched. he'd read the instructions that said removed cover before shaving. Well he didn't have a cover so he removed the foil. Ouch!