Main menu

Tag Archives: Stuff White People Like

I recently arrived at the conclusion that, due to the scars of my three-year tenure in corporate life (primarily spreadsheet-induced brain atrophication and emotional battery), I will require at least one year off in order to recover a sense of spirit and redirect my life course. As a result of this realization, I have become dedicated to hoarding as much into my savings account as possible and to meticulously compiling a detailed list of self-betterfication pursuits.

With a new sense of purpose and a personal deadline for leaving the job (May), I have felt one step closer to escaping the clutches of the corporate paycheck and evolving into a more interesting and fulfilled individual. Of course, yesterday as I basked in the dignity of becoming one of the very brave few with the guts to embark on such a perilous and uncertain journey, Google (in its infinite wisdom) led me to this:

When someone goes through a stressful experience they usually require some time off to clear their head, regain focus, and recover from the pain and suffering. Of course, in white culture these experiences are most often defined as finishing high school, making it through three years of college, or working for eleven months straight with only two weeks vacation and every statutory holiday (“they don’t count because I had to spend them with family.”)

Though you might consider finishing school or having a good job to be “accomplishments” many white people view them as burdens. As such, they can only handle them for so long before they start talking about their need to “take a year off” to travel, volunteer, or work abroad….

If you work with this person, be sure to give them a FAKE email address on their last day on the job or you will be inundated with emails about spiritual enlightenment and how great the food is compared to similar restaurants back home. Also, within the first five days following departure, this person will come up with the idea to write a book about their travel experience. Sadly, more books about mid-twenties white people traveling have been written than have been read….

Regardless of how a white person chooses to spend their year off, they all share the same goal of becoming more interesting to other people. Sadly, the people who find these stories interesting are other white people who are politely listening until they can tell their own, more interesting story about taking a year off….

And there you have it. My plan makes me a stereotype. No. As a TV-less, Prius driving girl with bangs and a liberal arts degree who could live on sushi and wine, I already was one. Well, I choose to think of myself not as a stereotype but rather as a heritage-embracing individual who is totally stoked about taking a year off to become more interesting.