The Official Joke thread

This is a discussion on The Official Joke thread within Shifting gears, part of the Around the Corner category; Originally Posted by rahulk2510
Whenever an iphone is launched, affection towards ones relative in US increases...
But this time everyone ...

Whenever an iphone is launched, affection towards ones relative in US increases...

But this time everyone will have to wait till its launched in India, as currently no provider will provide you nano sim, and yes your existing sim cant be modified into a nano sim as its also 15% thinner.

A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.
Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"
God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck. She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!

Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.

While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded,
"I thought you said I had another 43 years.
Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"

Way! She ain't the prettiest girl at the ball but you can afford her and she'll go home with you. Stop dreaming about that 120k 2012 ZR1 it ain't gonna happen lets face it you won't get a finer car than this, and I don't mean that in a good way. This is the best your ever gonna do, it's time to settle, you've made some poor choices in your life and you have to wear a nametag at work so all you can spend on a car is 3k so whats it gonna be? a 10 year old honda? a dented Corolla?

No! rise against the boring vanilla conformity and get yourself a tire smokin' Cougar huntin, import bashin' antique Corvette. What other car is gonna offer this much style and 150 mph performance for under 3k? A Camaro? do you always go for the ugly fat sister? Hell no! F-that F-body. Sure there might be a couple other cheap vettes out there but you ain't gotta push this one (not yet anyways).

The Vette itself is An 85 Targa White with red interior, Looks good 20 feet out in the rain but the paint is scarred up, Go watch Moby Dick with Gregory Peck (I'll wait) then you young'uns go google Gregory Peck (I'll wait somemore) and you'll get an idea of what the paint looks like. Interior is all there and not that bad some stains and the rear carpet is sun faded to hell. Seats are decent and the digidash works. Needs pass door trim and new window regulator.

Mechanically the Mullet mobile starts right up (has new exhaust) and runs good, Hit the gas and it'll outrun a Toyota with defective floormats (What a bunch of spin garbage that was) the auto trans shifts into all 4 gears and reverse, A/C needs a charge but the compressor cycles on so I know the system works, just low on freon.

C4 Vettes actually get good mileage too, about 25 per gallon on the highway, Premium? F-that Honey Badger runs fine on regular. Plus anytime your with two or more friends someone else has to drive ya'll with thier big boring land yacht, how much gas does that save?

You will be King of the trailer park with this ride and you can kick dirt in the faces of your 83 Mustang drivin' neighbors, they will think you won the lottery, ok one of the scratcher tickets anyhow.

Don't hold out! driving intact Vettes for under 3k are as rare as Hot girls that give you a real phone number. So stop waiting for Taylor Swift to write back to you and ask that Fat girl behind the counter at McDonalds that always seems to give you extra fries out for a date cuz this is it for you.

Grab your Electroplated Gold chain, and Def leppard CD and come on down and buy it before your mom goes in your room, finds your cash stash and spends it on Whiskey and weed.

Price is firm do not show up with 2899.00 in your pocket, and no asking "what's the least I'll take?" I hate that. I'll just say it's more than the most you'll pay. And reffering to this car as "the item" will not get a response. If it's still listed it's still available.
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