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9 Need-To-Know Rules For Football Season

7. RESPECT THE SPORT "Do not criticize. If the rules don't make sense at first, don't give the 'that's dumb' response. The rules are there for a reason, and the decisions made by the coaches and players usually happen based off the rules. It is important to be open to learning the rules, and being dismissive is a turn-off."—Jason

8. EASE UP ON THE TRIVIA, CLIFF CLAVEN "Unless you're watching figure skating, never try to upstage a guy with sports trivia knowledge. I had a friend with a girlfriend that would constantly spew out stats like, 'Did you see so-and-so? They passed for 300 yards last week!' It was annoying—girls shouldn't try too hard to be one of the guys. Just show interest, cheer when appropriate, and it never hurts to offer to go get beers."—John, 30, San Diego

9. SHOW OR FEIGN INTEREST "If you become bored during a game...FAKE IT! There's nothing more annoying to me than when a girl pulls out her BlackBerry and starts checking Facebook."—John Fake It Til You Make It, Ladies
"The best way to make yourself more attractive to a guy while watching football with guys is to appear to be a legitimate fan. You're not watching the game just to meet guys, or because your friend dragged you there, but because you like football and know something about the game. Basically, be comfortable and look like you're enjoying yourself and the game."—Pete

Now, tell us: Do you watch football? With whom? Are you a die hard fan or a novice? What do you think of these rules? And why is it so hard for me to keep track of the ball? The ball is tiny!

1. Patriots-inspired fun:

You lie back, with your back on the football. He will then use this to help thrust you back and forth. "Make sure to follow the example of the New England Patriots and deflate the ball to her comfort!" says Jason Nik, a relationship and sex coach.

2. The Seahawk:

While we're not choosing sides in the Super Bowl (at least not in this piece), the Seahawks are a dream inspiration for going down on someone! Make like a bird and take turns pleasuring each other orally – make sure to use no hands to stay true to theme!

4. The Tight End:

This is a fun twist on the rear entry doggie position, says Dr. Jess. One partner gets down on their hands and knees and the other slides in from behind. The first partner crosses their ankles and squeezes their thighs and buttocks together to tighten the grip.

5. The Field Goal:

One partner lies on their back with their legs up in the air bent at the knees like goal posts (they can grab their ankles to keep their legs in place), explains Dr. Jess. The other kneels in front and slides on in or dives down for some oral action.

6. The Champions:

One partner hops on top and rides away while pouring champagne (or beer or a sports drink) down the front of their body. If you'd rather skip the sticky Gatorade bath, Dr. Jess says to take your celebration to delicious new heights by substituting the sugary beverage with a savory flavored lube like Astroglide Strawberry Liquid.

7. More Champagne Fun:

What's your flavor profile? It's been said that a woman's natural scent falls into one of four distinct flavor profiles: citrus, baby lamb's breath, tree moss and shellfish, says dating expert Laurel House. Each flavor has a good and a bad based on your age and health —imagine a fresh briny oyster vs. an old slimy oyster.

You get the picture. So how does this pertain to the Super Bowl? Well, just as you might pair wine to food, for a heightened oral sex experience you can actually pair your flavor profile with champagne. After all, the best way for a man to drink champagne is out of your navel! Super Bowl winners are often doused in champagne. Save some of that bubbly for the private after party! A few suggestions? Citrus with Salon Champagne, Shellfish with Dom Perignon, Baby Lamb's Breath with Henriot Rose, Tree Moss with J Brut Sparkling Wine. The possibilities are endless!

8. Touchdown

He is down on his knees giving you oral sex, while you are standing at the door of the bedroom with your arms on the doorframe. "If he does a good job, come into the bedroom with him!" says Dr. Jane Greer, New York-based marriage and sex therapist and author of What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship.

You lie back, with your back on the football. He will then use this to help thrust you back and forth. "Make sure to follow the example of the New England Patriots and deflate the ball to her comfort!" says Jason Nik, a relationship and sex coach.