Sunday, November 28, 2010

Weeks 21 + 22

Time is FLYING. Turkey day marked week 23, so I guess it's time I posted these. Things continue to look rather official in the bump department. Apparently I'm not fooling anyone anymore, although I've personally felt big as a house for a couple of months now.

Loose-fitting shirts and especially dresses make the situation a lot more noticeable- I wore this dress to a work party for my husband and was pretty clearly in the family way:

Baby O is still kicking (elbowing? butting?) me pretty frequently and I'm still loving it. Hubs is still a little miffed that he can't feel it. Advantage: person carrying a human in their uterus. HA! I told him he can carry the next one.

Once again, my take on the pregnancy survey...

Pounds gained: Somewhere north of 15 and south of 20.

Cravings: Still gobbling down chocolate like a fatty. [See above.]

Think outside the fruit (via this website): Weeks 21 and 22 bring you beer bottle and football-sized babies, respectively. Could we get more stereotypical here?

Weirdest google searches: Nothing exciting to report... although I have been googling for deals on rockers and gliders like a fiend. Too bad Black Friday was good for nothing but tvs and video games.

In all seriousness for a minute: I'm having a bit of a mental breakdown about choosing a baby-catcher. The decision was pretty much made for me at four weeks when the midwife practice I loved stopped taking my insurance (the exact DAY I found out I was pregnant). I started seeing an OB group (that all my friends go to and recommend) and things have been fine there... well, now the midwife practice has worked it out with my insurance again. I've been finding myself more and more anti-intervention as this pregnancy continues, and I'm thinking about switching back to them. I'd really like to try giving birth the old-fashioned way; primarily to me this means believing that my body knows what it needs to do and trusting it, not jumping the gun on an epidural (and the likely-subsequent pitocin), and avoiding a c-section unless totally necessary. Does anyone have any words of wisdom on accomplishing any of those goals with a traditional OB group? The midwife group I'd like to go with delivers at the same hospital, so I need to find out just how much that ties their hands anyways. There is a birth center option too. I'm just thinking it makes the most sense to work with a provider whose goals match up with mine.

[Sidenote: ZERO ZERO ZERO judgment on anyone that chooses to give birth in a different way... if the way you'd like your child to come out of your body isn't a personal issue, then I don't know what is. The way I'd love to do it isn't the *better* way, it's just the way I'd love to do it. End disclaimer.]

When I was pregnant I went to a standard OB group. I was really fortunate that when I told them I wanted a natural birth they were completely fine with it. Even at the hospital there were no issues. I would talk to OB that you are seeing about natural birth to gauge their openness to a natural birth. If the reaction is anything but positive I would switch back to the midwives.

I'm 34 weeks pregnant, and I too am finding myself more anti-intervention as my pregnancy progresses. That being said, I am going OB delivery, and have had a very frank discussion with my OBGYN re: my inclination towards labouring without the aid of medications for as long as possible. She was 100% on board with a "try and see what happens" attitude. I'm keeping an open mind re: an epidural when push-literally-becomes-shove. I'm hoping to avoid pitocin if at all possible because I've heard these contractions are just the worst...

As for movement, my hubby kept "missing" it until about week 25/26 when he could feel kicks/punches/etc. Very cool the first time he "felt it".

My OB/GYN practice has a group of midwives, and I saw them throughout my pregnancy. We didn't really end up discussing my birth plan because I went into labor at 38 weeks, but my husband knew I wanted to "wait and see" re: the epidural and we were able to let our midwife know that once we got to the hospital. I ended up feeling the insane urge to push around 7cm, and when my midwife told me there was no way I could start pushing, I told her that I needed the epidrual. Funnily enough, both anesthesialogists were tied up in emergencies and I ended up laboring all the way to 10cm naturally... it was insane. Of course, we didn't find out I was at 10cm until directly after I got the epi, so we decided to rest for an hour before pushing - it was the best decision for us because once I started pushing, i was able to focus on what I was doing and really be in the moment. i don't think i would have been able to really "be there" had I not gotten the epi because my contractions were so intense. I ended up pushing for 4 hours, but my girl's head was just too big and I ended up with a c-section.

No words of wisdom here, but I would love to hear more about your experience working with a traditional OB and/or the midwife practice. I'm putting the cart before the horse a little bit here, but I know that I would like to give natural birth a go when that time comes for us. (Type A Control Freak Alert) I've already spoken to my OB about it and the hospital where she delivers has an entire staff of natural birthing nurses - most of whom have given birth naturally themselves! You might ask if there is anything like that at the hospital where your OB would be delivering!

I really like the idea of 'try it and see' for a healthy approach to laboring naturally. Great way to look at it!

I wanted to postpone any meds for as long as possible, too, but alas---my body did not cooperate and I had to be induced 2 weeks early b/c of high blood pressure. I would TOTALLY agree with one of your commenters statement that pitocin contractions are the WORST. Horrid. But I survived and did avoid the dreaded C-section.

Anyway---talk to your OB. Most of them are not the 'enemy' that a lot of naturalistic-approach folks assume. Be flexible in your plan as labor is anything but predictable and remember to have NO regrets. The worst thing you can do is be rigid on your 'plan' and then have something happen out of your control, which can make you feel like a 'failure'. End result=healthy baby=success.

I didn't especially enjoy the hospital/OB birth experience. The flat-on-your-back-legs-up position felt unnatural to me (but basically everything else is out once you've had an epidural and your legs are numb), the epidural seemed to dull any urge to push but meanwhile they turned it down enough that I felt all the pain (cue repeated choruses of: them-"push!", me-"I don't want to and you can't make me!"), I felt like the doctor was disapproving that I took so long, and there was no real post-birth care or guidance. So I would love to try the natural route if I did it again. EXCEPT, then I remember how much mind-boggling pain I was in before the epidural, and I know deep down that I wouldn't have the strength. So, as much as I disliked the OB experience, it was kind of my only option.

Meanwhile, the one thing I felt strongly about was "NO episiotemy," but they gave me one, and I was so grateful when it actually happened! Totally removed the last obstacle between "baby in" and "baby out."

Everyone's experience is TOTALLY DIFFERENT, so please don't take all my mentions of pain to suggest that will be your experience. I have fibromyalgia, which means my nervous system takes all stimuli like pain and amps them up. Many healthy women find labor to be totally bearable.

Sorry, not sure any of this constitutes advice. Just thought I'd share my own rambling thoughts in case they help.... Would going with the midwife practice mean you could still call in the pain meds if it came to that? Would you deliver in the same hospital? If yes to both, I would probably go with the midwives on the theory that they know more low-intervention ways to keep you healthy and comfortable. If no, the choice might be a bit harder.

I had a friend who switched from OB to midwives at about week 30. She just was not happy with the birthing plans the OB group provided her and had a more natural birth planned. She was nervous about switching so late, but couldn't have been happier with her birthing experience. You have to do what is right for you.

I can totally appreciate women who want to (and do) go natural - I wish that I truly believed I had it in me, but I don't. I think every woman's decision on how to give birth is right for that person, so no judgments here (especially since I am pretty sure I'll be doing the hospital/OB/drug birth plan). Best of luck in determining what is best for you!

I obviously can't help out much with the birthing advice ;) ... but I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed coffee with you this morning! And for some reason I'm just now discovering your blog! Looking forward to meeting up again soon!

The OB practice I went to was very modern, and just asked if I had a birth plan starting around 32 weeks and I would discuss my thoughts about what would happen. My plan was to go with the flow and not put up any obstacles to anything and see what happened. And I was allowed to do that for 8 hours before I got my first dose of pitocin. Since I hadn't labored before my water broke, I was on the 24 hour timer for birth. I made it about 12 hours without the epidural, but when I passed out standing up twice and couldn't stop puking up bile with about 8 more hours of labor ahead of me (they predicted it perfectly!), I opted for the epidural. Additionally, we did use suction to pop the baby out at the end as well. I was very satisfied by the way that it was handled as well... I was told the situation (the baby's heart rate was dropping in the birth canal when I pushed), given a bit more time to push past, and then asked again if it was ok to use suction. Nothing was pushed on me at any time, and I was completely in control. :)So in the end, my birth plan was completely successful! I really loved my OB, and all of the Dr's in the practice, so no matter who happened to be on call that night, all was well!These practices do exist! :)

I'm ten weeks postpardum and had my little lady naturally.. after 27 hours of labor. I certainly recommend hopping in a tub if at all possible. It was the only way I felt able to gain control of my pain during the later stages of labor. Baby was born in the water- she swam right out, came out of the water alert and not crying :)

While pregnant, I read as many Ina May Gaskin childbirth and midwifery books I could get my hands on. They're loaded with beautiful and empowering natural childbirth stories. By doing so, I was able to put myself in the mindset that I absolutely could have a baby without intervention- it's what our bodies are designed to do. I'll be the first one to admit, hell yes it hurts. But with every hurt you know you're getting closer to the best reward ever. After she was born I joked with my husband that he was having the next one! But now, ten weeks later, I already know I can do it again.