When You Have Sex With a Feminist

Society has stereotyped The Feminist as a man hater, a dyke, a ‘feminazi’ bent on world domination. What most of society doesn’t understand is that men take part in the feminist movement too! In fact, a YouGov poll showed that after being given the definition of a feminist, 51% of men said they considered themselves to be one. After attending a Planned Parenthood conference in D.C. this past month, I had a little “encounter” with one. My partner was male, but yours definitely doesn’t have to be! Here is what happens when you get down with a feminist:

They ask for consent to kiss you. Touch you. Do that with you. In fact, if it’s something s/he wants, they ask you first. And that makes it so much better.

“Your body, your choice.” You have body piercings? Cool. Tattoos? Um, awesome. You don’t shave? Not even down there? He does not care. At all. S/he respects the decisions you make regarding your body. S/he doesn’t want a conveyer-belt vagina—s/he wants yours.

Politically and sexually progressive, amirite? Maybe I’m wrong, but what you believe in politically transfers to the bedroom. And let me tell you, this two-party system is gonna be broad-minded. Open to suggestion. Flexible. O.K, I’ll stop making jokes, but feminists are usually willing to try anything twice.

“I really want to please you.” Ugh. This gets me every time. It’s getting hot and heavy. The panic begins to overwhelm me. I start thinking, “I don’t know what to do with a penis! I don’t have a penis! Porn, why have you failed me??!!” But then he says those two magic words: “You first.” (Sigh) Yes. Please.

There’s no guarantee your partner isn’t going to do some annoying pre-Third-Wave crap (“Do ya like my big dick? Do ya?”). But treat yo’self, and be with someone who cares about the social and economic equality of the sexes.