Four wild knockouts to one dull decision — not a bad ratio for Saturday’s EliteXC card. About 80 of you threw inpredictions for how the “Street Certified” main event would turn out, and we’re pleased to announce a winner. On 2/15, at 2:37 pm, commenter “charles” said:

kimbo TKO in 42 sec

Sure, it was actually a KO, but the fight was called at 43 seconds, and that’s pretty damn close. So Charles, if you’re reading this, e-mail feedback@cagepotato.com with your address and we’ll send you a copy of Iceman: My Fighting Life, signed by Chuck Liddell himself. We’d also like to give special recognition to commenter “skeet,” who said “kimbo :37 tko kimbo will have him on the ground face down.” Psychic much?!?

Next order of business: Can we all agree that it’s time for Kimbo to face someone as good as he is? Not an old boxer, not a food-poisoned pussy, not a one-dimensional brawler 12 years past his prime, but a legitimate heavyweight with some talent? If there’s one thing that EliteXC proved on Saturday, it’s that its heavyweight division is at least as deep as the UFC’s — I know, not saying much — especially when you factor in Pro Elite sub-promotions like Cage Rage. I’m willing to accept that Antonio Silva had an off night (due to a possible pre-fight injury) and that he’s still a couple steps ahead of Kimbo as far as ability, but I would love to see how Kimbo would do against Ricco “Bacon Double-Cheeseburger” Rodriguez. Undefeated Brett Rogers, who knocked out James Thompson on Saturday, seems like he’d be the perfect guy for Kimbo to face if he wants to demand a little more respect. And at the end of the “Street Certified” broadcast, Mauro Ranallo and Stephen Quadros suggested that Kimbo could take on the winner of the Ken Shamrock/Robert “Buzz” Berry match at Cage Rage next month. Berry would be a great option — especially since he’s already called out Kimbo — but putting Kimbo against Shamrock’s legendary submission expertise (and willingness to take a beating) in just his fourth MMA bout might be asking too much.

Here’s what I’m afraid EliteXC might actually do: 1) Put Kimbo up against James Thompson so their franchise star can rack up at least one more guaranteed knockout before they start challenging him, or 2) Track down Sean Gannon so they can settle their grudge. As much as Kimbo might want to avenge his only loss as an “amateur,” the match-up just wouldn’t be competitive anymore, and wouldn’t do anything to prove that Kimbo should be taken seriously now.

One more thing: We went a perfect five-for-five in predicting the winners of “Street Certified”‘s main card, and called three of them perfectly (winner/round/method). Damn it feels good to be right once in a while…

What it do, nephews? Kimbo, Tank, Ricco, Bigfoot, and the rest of the gang are about to do battle at Miami’s Bank United Center. Watch the action on Showtime starting at 10 p.m. if you can, and/or follow our round-by-round results and commentary after the jump. Click the “more” link and refresh the page every few minutes, and let’s have some good clean fights out there. WAR FERGUSON!

Tank vs. Kimbo (heavyweights): We all know how this is going to end. A month ago, we offered a “fantastic” prize to the CagePotato reader who could call the result the closest. Well, the prediction lines will be open until the end of the day, so throw a guess on the comments section of that page for your chance to win (what else) a signed copy of Iceman: My Fighting Life by Chuck Liddell. We’re sticking with our prediction of Kimbo winning by TKO (punches) in 59 seconds. MMABettingBlog says that since the betting odds on this match are so heavily stacked in Kimbo’s favor — he’s a -450 favorite, meaning you’d have to bet $450 on him to get $100 back if he wins — Tank is actually the smart money bet. Especially if you think losing money is smart.

Antonio Silva vs. Ricco Rodriguez (heavyweights): Speaking of sports betting, this fight reminds me of my personal rule — never bet against the streak. And as we discussed yesterday, Bigfoot Silva’s got a crazy one going: 10 fights, all of them lasting less than four minutes. Outside of the Ben Rothwell spit-debacle decision loss, Ricco “Suave” has been looking great lately, with six stoppage wins in his last seven fights. We just don’t think he’ll be able to deal with Silva’s size and power — Bigfoot by first-round GnP TKO. By the way, Rodriguez said this at yesterday’s press conference: “Win or lose, six months from now Antonio and I will be fighting again, probably for a title. We are the two best fighters in this organization right now. Tank and Kimbo are just tomato cans. We are the two real fighters.” We have a feeling Ricco might live to regret that quote…

Kimbo Slice and Tank Abbott participated in one last press conference for “Street Certified” yesterday at Bernie Kosar’s Steakhouse in Miami. It seems like the two have blown their respective-wads, hype-wise, but they did provide these quotes:

TANK ABBOTT:
— “Training has just evolved for this fight more than for any of my other opponents. I have taken it very seriously.”

— “Kimbo is going to get hurt, that’s for sure. The way I am and the shape I’m in right now I can’t fathom a human being who can take five minutes of my shots. I am on fire right now.”

— “I think it is funny that he’s got Bas Rutten to train him. This is a real fight, not a slap-fest. He should have gotten a real fighter to train him. Training with Bas is better than nothing. But you either have it or you don’t. Technique doesn’t make you tough.”

— “I think Kimbo’s motivation is to be on TV or on the Internet. I think that is why he fights. Me? I have been in over 200 street fights to various degrees, ranging from knocking a guy out at a stop light to sending someone to the ICU for a week. I fight because I love it…I like it because I can’t go to jail for it.”

— “If you make a strategy to fight someone you are developing little crutches for yourself. I don’t have a plan.”

KIMBO SLICE:
— “Tank is full of shit if he thinks I can’t take his punches. I’m bringing the whole thing to the cage. I am bringing the hood with me to this cage.”

— “This fight means a lot to not only me but the entire city. This is big time. That is why I am going to break his rib, break his nose, break his arm.”

— “There are a lot of things in my arsenal I am going to try to use. If he’s a tad bit slow, I’m going to hurt him. I’ve trained with the best. It is going to be a long fight for him, or a short night.”

— “The right hand is for his top lip, the left hand is for his bottom lip.”

— “Bas (Rutten) is a mentor of mine. Anything Tank has to say about Bas, I am going to take it personal. I am going to make him pay for his words.”

— “Tank has a very big mouth. He needs to be careful about what he says. We take a lot of things personal. I just hope I don’t run into him before the fight starts. I want to settle this in the cage.”

Five years before Frank Mir disposed of Brock Lesnar via kneebar, he put away Tank Abbott with an ankle-lock at UFC 41: Onslaught (2/28/03). The fight marked Tank’s first professional match since 1998, and Mir’s sixth overall. Though Tank showed some nimble movement on the ground, Mir displayed his ability to keep calm against an aggressive opponent while expertly working toward a submission. Following this fight, Mir won two victories over Wes Sims (the first by illegal-stomp DQ, the second by KO) then faced Tim Sylvia for the title. Abbott would close out 2003 by losing to Kimo Leopoldo and Wesley Correira, then leaving the UFC.