How many shots would you, a Beyoncé employee, have to take to work up enough Dutch courage to secretly unhook one of the mini stockings to keep as a souvenir of the time you got close enough to Beyoncé at the company holiday party to unhook a mini stocking from her coat?

What kind of sentence do you think you'd get as a result?

Why no menorah, though? That would have really put it over the top, IMO.

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