20 Actually Useful Classes You Wish They Taught in High School

"Oh, no, I don't know what taxes are, but I can properly identify mitochondria ALL DAY," said no one ever.

It's the same thing every school year: You spend hours of your life cramming things into your skull that you will probably never use again. Don't they know you would gladly free up brain space currently being taken up by Ed Sheeran lyrics if only they taught these Actually Useful Things in school?

1.Baewatch 101

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How to screen-stalk your crush, their exes, and every other distant relation after that, without accidentally making their name your status, or liking a 77-week old picture. #thefear

2. Surviving Group Projects

Someone, anyone: Help me not backhand this know-it-all I got stuck with. I cannot get into my dream college if I get suspended for attacking my lab partner.

3. Taxes: What, Even?

1-9. W-2. 1040-F. Is this real life or is this Battleship? Please help me not get chased down by the government and thrown in jail for the rest of my life (that's what happens if I screw this up, right?).

6. Sex Ed: Things I'll Google Privately and Freak Myself Out Over Later

Enough with Ye Olde Miracle of Life video or weird water colored diagrams — I just need someone to tell me straight up: Does This Look Normal, Am I Doing This Right, and/or Will This Hurt Me?Either that, or I wait for my parents to attempt "The Talk" again. So, no.

7. Adult Pieces of Paper

I'm sorry, do cover letters and resumes just show up in my desk on my 16th birthday? You want me to dissect Shakespeare, but you can't help me get an interview at Chipotle?! WHAT KIND OF WORLD IS THIS?

The people who leave hater-y comments, throw unnecessary shade and think it's still cute to be a bully must have all taken a class together. This could have been avoided.

11. A Study of Modern-Day Heroes

Fine, fair: I can get down with studying age-old classics like The Great Gatsby and Catcher in the Rye. But why again can't we talk about the heroic subtleties of Katniss or Hazel?

12. "You're" is YOU ARE: Grammar So That You Won't Embarrass Yourself

So, fine, everyone was homesick the day we all learned these in, like, 3rd grade. But it's probably time to learn this stuff before one of these grammar fails shows up on a cover letter.

13. Is Paying for College Going to Ruin My Life?

"Loans," "debts" and "repayment" all sound like Words That Mean The End Of My Youthful Glee. Isn't college supposed to help me pay for my life?!

14. Awkward Run-Ins

I'm shopping with my besties when I run into an ex-bae, ex-bff, ex-wife of my uncle who has zero personal boundaries. What do I say? How do I get away? I can't use my phone as an excuse anymore, huh?

15. Traveling For Cheap: Is That A Thing?

Where do I get one of those person-sized hiking sacks? Is a hostel where I go to die? Dear Everyone On Instagram: Stop showing how me you can all afford to fabulously backpack through Europe and START TELLING ME HOW!

16. Help Me Feed Me

I know that, vaguely someday, I'll have to learn more than how to boil water for my chai tea. Please help me to not chop off my fingers.

17. How to Answer: "So Tell Me About Yourself"

The first two minutes of an interview are excruciating. You feel like a car salesman but instead of a car, you're selling your self-worth. How do I not sound like an idiot?

18. I Picked a Bae. Now What?

Oh, insta-stalking, schedule-memorizing, and useless daydreaming? I'm fine. It's the actual human exchange I'd like help with. I guess a relationship requires that at some point?

19. Self Defense: But Actually

In addition to actual self defense so I can defend myself if someone physically attacks me, I'm gonna need help with the Creep On Train With a Staring Problem/Creep Who Won't Stay Out Of My DM's variety.

20. How to Bop to Music Without Repelling Everyone

This house party isn't dim enough for me to un-self-consciously jam out Taylor Swift-style. Someone teach me how to bop in medium lighting without anyone thinking I need medical attention?

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