Hooleys Irish Pub & Grill: Every stick of woodwork and furniture here is imported from Ireland — and so’s a bit of the high-spirited warmth and hospitality you’d find on a cold night in any pub in Galway. 2955 Jamacha Road, El Cajon; (619) 670-7468

O’Sullivan’s: Whether you own a surfboard or a shillelagh, you fit in at this Carlsbad pub (formerly Tom Giblin’s). 640 Grand Ave., Suite A, Carlsbad; (760) 729-7234

The Ould Sod: Irish beer, brogue-bellowing bartenders and live music make up this Normal Heights pub. 3373 Adams Ave., Normal Heights; (619) 284-6594

Patrick’s Irish Pub: Joining Patrick’s Paddy Pint Club entitles you to happy hour prices all the time and no cover charge. More importantly, it scores you a personalized pint glass. 13314 Poway Road, Poway; (858) 486-0764

Face it, novelty holidays like St. Patrick’s Day call for gimmicks saucier than green underwear and pinching parties.

They call for novelty-sized libations: cocktails the size of Big Gulps, buckets of flaming rum punch that come with 3-foot straws and 6-liter bottles of beer.

Any “holiday” in which you’re not even excused from your 9-to-5 deal earns you drinks fit for Bigfoot as soon as quitting time rolls around.

Plus, nothing shows your commitment to the preservation of Irish heritage like a 40-ounce margarita. Not to mention your goal of intentionally working up the need to call a cab.

Here’s the skinny on where to find bladder stretchers in San Diego (and Tijuana).

Baja Betty’s

1421 University Ave., Hillcrest(619) 269-8510

When cocktails are large enough to accommodate bath toys in lieu of little paper umbrellas, they should. Hillcrest’s Mexi-kitsch cocina serves up margaritas (on the cover) so vast — 42 ounces, to be exact — that they come complete with a rubber ducky bobbing its way around the rim. And yes, it’s yours to take home.

Centifonti’s Restaurant

8365 La Mesa Blvd., La Mesa(619) 461-4434

The place packs a full bar, starring 112-ounce glass boots full of beer. Guinness aficionados, take the waitress’ advice when she warns you to opt for any of the lighter brews on tap.

And if 3 liters of lager in one sitting sounds more like a chore than a joy, know that all Mexican beers go for $2 on Fridays.

Chez

Plaza Fiesta Local5 Paseo de los Heroes, Tijuana

Chez’s 118-liter-sized drinks go by dirty names that sound like they were penned by a pack of tanked teenagers. Star concoctions include “Between the Sheets” (rum, brandy, orange liqueur, lime, salt and soda), “Take Off My Underwear” (tequila, crème de menthe, lime, pineapple and orange juice), “Silk Pantyhose” (rum, grenadine and Carnation milk) and “Spiritual Balls” (gin, crème de coconut, milk and grape juice). Anything goes for $5, and Fridays are two for one (that means you get two of the same drink for $5, not one for $2.50).

China Inn

877 Hornblend St., Pacific Beach(858) 483-6680

It’s the Ringling Bros. of cocktails: a flaming, fruity, rum-brandy concoction that arrives afire in a ceramic cup the size of a fish bowl. And the 3-foot straw? That’s to keep your eyebrows safe from the singe zone. It’s also a prerequisite for any tacky Chinese restaurant in which nothing appears to have changed since the 1970s. You’ll find them at Mandarin House in Bankers Hill and Wong’s Dragon Room in La Mesa, too.

O’Hungry’s

2547 San Diego Ave., Old Town(619) 298-0133

Even if it comes in a bottle, they’ll dump it into a 50-ounce test tube and turn it over to you for $12 to $15: Sam Adams, Fat Tire, Dos Equis, Redhook IPA, Ballast Point Yellowtail, Blue Moon, Stella, Coors Light and Bud Light.

Toronado

4026 30th St., North Park(619) 282-0456

A beer you can bearhug sounds too good to be true, but it’s not. Toronado is known to have a giant bottle of Duvel or two on hand in the cooler behind the bar. If not, give them a few days’ notice, and they’ll phone one in, just for you. Available in 1½, 3 and 6 liters, it’s no doubt the macrophile’s beer of choice. (Amazonian Flemish babe not included.)

Yardhouse

1023 Fourth Ave., Downtown(619) 233-9273

Half-Yardhouse would be a more accurate handle. The Gaslamp locale ditched its namesake after having to replace too many of the 3-foot, handblown glass tubes, which don’t come cheap. They’ve kept the name but downsized to selling beer by the half-yard, 33 to 36 ounces of 175 or so brews for $10 to $18. Purists, look at it this way: You have no choice but to double fist.