7 Christmas Songs That May Not Have The Jolly Message You Thought They Did

If you're one of those people who loves Christmas music so much that you listen to it year 'round, you may want to stop reading after this sentence.

Call me the Grinch, I don't care, he lives alone with his dog and that doesn't sound so bad sometimes.

But my ears have been inundated with holiday tunes since August and I am a little salty about it. And being a writer, I tend to notice song lyrics, especially if it is a song I have heard a gazillion times. So with this tendency, I started listening to some of the holiday classics analytically.

This may have been a HUGE mistake. Because I started unwrapping all of the weird messages not so subtly hidden in these seasonal jingles.

I know, it upset me too, but here are seven that I found particularly strange.

1. "Baby it's Cold Outside"

Multiple radio stations have actually started banning this song for, frankly, obvious reasons. In the #MeToo era, we can't ignore the narrative of a man blatantly refusing to listen to a woman denying his advances. She even says, "the answer is no," and he keeps trying to get her to stay.

And the "what's in this drink?" line? Not OK. Luckily, there is a new version that emphasizes consent out there.

2. "Santa Baby"

Perhaps not as creepy as the last one, but the innuendo is too weird here. I'm not wrong.

3. "Santa Claus is Coming to Town"

At first listen perhaps this seems like a cute tune, reminding you of how much you cared about making Santa's "good" list as a kid, but objectively the lyrics, "he sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake" describes a stalker. Describes a potential serial killer. And that's NOT cute.

4. "All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth"

Why is this song sung by adults so often? I understand how toddlers lose teeth, but like how did you lose them, a bar fight?

5. "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"

So "mommy" and daddy dressed as Santa may be consenting adults showing affection for each other, but this is such a strange and light-hearted way to sing about a potentially traumatizing event for a young child.

6. "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer"

Wait, what happened to Grandma?!

7. "Father Christmas"

So, this one may not be THAT popular, but I remember it growing up and it's actually very violent. The chorus alone: "Father Christmas, give us some money, don't mess around with those silly toys, we'll beat you up if you don't hand it over." Enough said.

80 Nicki Minaj Lyrics Perfect For Instagram Captions

Nicki Minaj lets the world know about her amazing Instagram skills in Beyonce's "Flawless," when she raps "Instagram another flawless pic." Do you have a #Flawless Instagram picture but need a clever caption to go with it? The Queen of Rap has plenty of Insta-worthy song lyrics.

*(Some lyrics have been edited to keep this article "PG". Feel free to look up the real Nicki Minaj lyrics if you hate the radio edit.)

When you want to diss a hater:

1. "You couldn't get a fan if it was hangin' from the ceilin." 2. "I'm throwing shade like it's sunny." 3. "I'm in my own lane, you ain't in my category." 4. "These (girls) couldn’t test me even if their name was Pop Quiz." 5. "Yo, people will love you and support you when it's beneficial. I'ma forgive, I won't forget, but I'ma dead the issue." 6. "Not that I don't got good vision, but I don't see competition." 7. "I’m Angelina, you Jennifer. Come on (girl), you see where Brad at." 8. "I look like "yes" and you look like "no"." 9. "But if you're ugly it's a no text zone." 10. "If you are my rival, then that means you're suicidal." 11. "Shout out to my haters, Sorry that you couldn't faze me." 12. "Trash talk to 'em then I put 'em in a Hefty." 13. "Like I mean I don't even know why you girls bother at this point. Like give up, it's me, I win, you lose." 14. "All these haters mad because I'm so established." 15. "Competition? why yes I would love some."

When you're hanging with your clique:

31. "Cherish these nights, cherish these people. Life is a movie, but there will never be a sequel." 32. "I’m with some hood girls lookin’ back at it." 33. "We dope girls, we flawless. We the poster girls for all this." 34. "Pretty gang, always keep them (boys) on geek." 35. "The night is still young, and so are we!" 36. "If you ain’t on the team, you playin’ for team D, ’Cause we A-listers, we paid sisters." 37. "Pretty (girls) only could get in my posse." 38. "Cause we the mean girls, y-yes we so fetch." 39. "We fresh to death, down to the shoes." 40. "Ain't at no wedding but all my girls cake tops." 41. "Got a whole bunch of pretty gang in my clique." 42. "Clap for the heavyweight champ, me, But I couldn't do it all alone, WE." 43. "Put your drinks up, It's a celebration every time we link up." 44. "I'm with some flawless (girls) because they be mobbin' pretty."

When you're hanging with your significant other:

45. "He tryna kick it like a ninja." 46. "He could tell that I was wifey material." 47. "Ayo, I just wanna be your first go to." 48. "You got spark, you, you got spunk. You, you got something all the girls want." 49. Find me in the dark, I'll be in the stars, Find me in your heart, I'm in need of your love." 50. "They holler at me, but it's you, you." 51. "I'm not living right, I’m not living if you’re not by my side." 52. "I just wanna be somebody that can add to, your wife, be a friend, be a teacher and a fan, too." 53. "I just wanna be your favorite." 54. "He was the realest, I was the baddest, we was the illest." 55. "I know you can save me and make me feel alive." 56. "Yes I'll be your girl, forever your lady, You ain't ever gotta worry, I'm down for you baby." 57. "Baby you my everything, You all I ever wanted."

When you're single and loving it:

58. "You could be the king, but watch the queen conquer!" 59. "Thats why I'm crowned queen, and I ain't looking for the prom king." 60. "I like independent, like July 4th." 61. "I ain't never need a man, to take care of me." 62. "He be like, "Yo, you so legendary", But he can tell just by my face he ain't getting any." 63. "I am not Jasmine, I am Aladdin." 64. "I don't even brake when I'm backing up, I'll swerve on a (boy) if he acting up." 65. "So many boys in here where do I begin?"

When you're just living life:

66. "I never worry, life is a journey. I just wanna enjoy the ride." 67. "Tonight is the night that I'ma get twisted." 68. "I’mma keep it movin', be classy and graceful." 69. "So make sure the stars is what you aim for, make mistakes though." 70. "And we gon' hangover the next day. But we will remember this day." 71. "My only motto in my life is don't lose." 72. "Take me, or leave me, I'll never be perfect. Believe me, I'm worth it." 73. "I believe that life is a prize, but to live doesn't mean you're alive." 74. "I wish that I could have this moment for life." 75. "If I scream, if I cry, It's only 'cause I feel alive." 76. "I can't believe it, it's so amazing. This club is heating, this party's blazing."" 77. "It's so amazing, I figured out this world is ours for the taking." 78. "I am not a girl that can ever be defined."79. "I got next, I'm gonna shine."80. "This is my moment I just feel so alive."