arguments

My boyfriend and I have kind of argued about jellybeans. I say "kind of" because it didn't get serious, but still, we definitely had completely opposite opinions about the situation. For some backstory, Blake got a huge vat of jellybeans as a Christmas present from his family. The second he unwrapped it, my eyes locked onto the lovely rainbow-color mix of deliciousness inside. I can pop jellybeans all day, every day. The juicy burst of flavor (well, fake flavor, I don't pretend that they're a virtuous snack choice) offers such a fantastic sugar rush. The issue is that I really like only the yellow and green ones, while Blake eats all of them. Fast-forward to a few days later, when there was not a single yellow or green bean in the entire top half of the container. "You can't just go through and pick out the lemon and limes ones!" he'd tell me, even though he'd admitted they were his least favorite. Then I would explain why they were so good and say that I had left him some yellows, because there's no way I'd subject myself to the awfulness of buttered popcorn jellybeans. For the rest of Christmas break, read more

Maybe you have a sneaking suspicion that your guy friend has feelings for you. Maybe you're not ready to move in together. Or maybe your sex life isn't exactly, well, doing it for you. Whatever the case may be, bringing up awkward topics with your guy is tricky territory. You owe it to yourself to be honest and address issues that are keeping you from being as blissed-out as possible, but at the same time you don't want to hurt the dude's feelings. Here are a few ways to make the conversation as easy as possible. Don't get drunk. I know there's a reason they call alcohol "liquid courage," but there's such a fine line between feeling emboldened to be totally honest and feeling like your mouth has a mind of its own and refuses to stop talking. Plus, alcohol will just heighten your emotions—and his, if he's also drinking—and make it easy to overreact. Talk side by side. Have you ever noticed that your guy will open up more when you're facing the same direction instead of looking at each other? It takes the pressure off the situation. Instead of it seeming like a Very Important Conversation with capital read more

When we're angry, it's all too easy to slip into bad habits and dirty fighting tactics. Our voices rise, our tempters heat, and the name-calling and worse can begin. We know we're not doing anything but making an already uncomfortable situation worse, but in the heat of a fight, it's not always easy to step back and take a turn for the high road. So, to help us all out—because I am guilty of these too!—I've identified four dirty fighting tactics and how we can work to avoid them during our next disagreements. Overgeneralizing: Your guy never picks up after himself, and he's always late. While it may feel as if he hasn't folded a single shirt in an entire year, that's likely not the case—and making the statement as if it's gospel truth will only sting him and exaggerate the issue at hand. Instead, zero in on what's bothering you now, and do your best to concisely explain why. Then work together to find a solution so you won't be tempted to think, here he goes again. For example, "I know it's just five minutes, but when you're late, I feel like what we're got planned isn't important to read more

There's a Friends scene in which Ross and Rachel decide to give their on-again, off-again relationship a brief on-again moment that ends with the duo shouting insults at each other: "Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means 'you are,'" Ross sputters. "Y-O-U-R means 'your'!" And as he storms out, Rachel tosses back, "Hey! Just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy, and it is a big deal!" Maybe your breakup ended with similar banter. But if you took the high road, you likely have a few one-liners you wish you could fling his way. So I gathered a few friends and the things they've left unsaid for your revenge pleasure. 1. "You know how you said you'd be the best sex I ever had? Well, you were wrong. Really, really wrong." 2. "Your attempts at sounding more intelligent—using the word 'utilized' instead of 'used'—were so annoying. And they didn't fool anyone." 3. "Thank you for being such a monumental jerk so that I could see just how amazing my new boyfriend really is." 4. "I lied: You weren't the biggest guy I'd ever seen." 5. "I finally met a man who doesn't play videos games every single day, and read more

Have you heard about Sidetaker? It’s a website that lets you settle arguments with your significant other online. You post your side of the story, your main squeeze responds, and then the virtual mob casts their vote and comments. I think it’s brilliant. Here are a few of my favorite Sidetaker tiffs: read more