Murray Mexted, who has played 34 Tests for New Zealand and captained the All Blacks on seven occasions, is better known nowadays for his colourful commentary alongside Grant Nisbett.

Never one to shy away from an opportunity to twist something into a sexual reference, the ex-Number Eight has provided the rugby world (in the Southern Hemisphere anyway) with more than a few laughs.

A few other classic Mexted one-liners are:

- "Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw." - "You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that." - "I haven't had a knee operation on any other part of my body." - "Its all tied up at 14-13" - "Andy Ellis - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago"

Here's a short compilation of some of the character's finer moments behind the microphone.

brilliant stuff, i think he did commentary for itv during the world cup and came up with some more crackers in one of the japanese game. referring to them as japs an commenting on their kung fu throws!

* "Andy Ellis - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago"* "He scored that try after only 22 seconds - totally against the run of play."* "I would not say he (Rico Gear) is the best left winger in the Super 14, but there are none better."* "Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw."* "Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."* "There's a couple of Hore's on display tonight" (the brothers Charlie Hore (Highlanders) and Andrew Hore (Hurricanes) playing on opposing teams)* "Everybody knows that I have been pumping Martin Leslie for a couple of seasons now."* "You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that."* "This game is a white wash, but the All Blacks are black, these no white teams!"* "I haven't had a knee operation on any other part of my body."* "He's looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline."* "Spencer's running across field calling out, 'come inside me, come inside me.'"* "I can tell you it's a magnificent sensation when the gap opens up like that and you just burst right through."* "I don't like this new law, because your first instinct when you see a man on the ground is to go down on him"* "Darryl Gibson has been quite magnificent coming inside Andrew Mehrtens, and I'm looking forward to seeing more of the same today."* "There's nothing that a tight forward likes more than a loosie right up his backside"* "Its all tied up at 14-13"* "Trapped like a shag on the rocks" (RWC07 Georgia vs Argentina)* "He ran like a bat" (RWC07 Georgia vs Argentina)* Theres lots of hooters over here Nisbo.* "He who hesitates......is lost."* "Both sides are here to play rugby."* A Sky TV producer was conducting a sound test before the last Springbok test at Carisbrook..."Murray can you hear me?....Murray can you hear me?" Murray: "No."* "The turf here (Newlands) never took properly and it isn't very well rooted...in fact you could say it is rooted.....did I just say that?"* "The All Blacks second-rowers are huge men. They're both over one meter tall ... hang on, that would make them midgets."* "Rico Gear. What a great-sounding name. He sounds like a drug dealer from Brazil."* "They are so used to this sort of thing happening I should think they train with 13 men."(on the Hurricanes)* "Hooters in New Zealand Tony? Hooters are what you see on the sidelines!" (On the siren that signals half and full time)

I gotta say that of all the commentators, in the Southern Hemisphere at least, Murray Mexted and his other NZ counterparts are my favourites (I'm Australian). They know their onions all the while supplying us with a few laughs, Mexted in particular. And aren't too biased either (at least they hide it well). The Australian commentators (on FOX) aren't bad but get too juvenile and somewhat, albeit unashamedly, biased. The South African's are just woeful. They know about SA players but constantly get Oz players mixed up. The amount of times they confuse George Smith with Mark Gerrard is just embarrassing. And I'm not even going to mention their obvious bias.Yep Murray's a gem.

Dave are you actually retarded? NZ has by far the worst and definitely the most biased commentators and I'm a kiwi I actually think that the SA commentators are the best in the southern hemisphere without a doubt and the Aussies are pretty funny. I sometimes watch the games on mute when the kiwis are commentating. Here's an example of NZ commentating. In the all blacks vs aussie game in Tokyo. "most of the Japanese in the crowd are supporting the all blacks, that's probably because they like a team that actually wins"- Grant Nisbet