SBS Volume 12

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D: Timmy Ueda-sama of the SBS Hijacking Group, I beg of you! Please accept me, Martha Shimoda, as your follower. I'll do anything you want. So, to begin with... "Start the SBS!!" Yaaay. How was it Timmy-sama? I started it.

D: Hello, Mr. Oda-sensei. I am continuing my efforts to be a swordsman. Do you if I keep working as a swordsman, that someday I might be as strong as Sanji-san?

O: Crappity crap!! Goddamn Timmy!! Are you one of Timmy's followers, too?! Is that right?! Wait, you are not?! Oh...!! Sorry, sorry. Sorry for flying off the handle like that. Uhhh... Become like Sanji by being a swordsman...? Yeah, right!! What does thet have to do with anything?! Crap!! I'm getting all out of whack this time around... Be cool, be cool.

D: Greetings. Me like Luffy Number 1. Number 2 is Sanji. The reason is Sanji's expressions.

Shitty old geezer > Poop old man

Shitty bastards > Poop men

Shit, that tastes good > Poop delicious

Quite filthy, isn't he. Is it okay if I lower Sanji's rank?

O: I'm not gonna argue with ya on that one. Right? How can you argue with that?

D: Oda-chaaaan. I've always wanted to ask; at the end of the book, it says making unauthorized copies is a copyright violation. But is it okay to make copies of the timetable and stuff? Please tell me. From the third of Coby's happy friends.

O: It's complicated to explain, but basically, permission has been granted in several places for that illustration, so it's all right. Also, a lot of people wrote to say, "My school goes for eight periods", but I'm sure you can manage a workaround on that one. Sorry. It's hard to study for so long!

D: Here's a question. When do fanletters reach you, Oda-sensei? Every week? For instance, if I mailed one on November 1st, when does it fall into your hands? Please let me know.

O: First of all, the letters everyone sends me are delivered to the "Weekly Shounen Jump Editorial Department". There, people working part-time separate the letters according to author, and my manager sends me my letters once a week. So if you're lucky, it might even be the day it arrives at the Editorial Department.It's almost always within a week or two, though.

D: You said in Volume 7 that when you're drawing characters' facial expressions, you make the same face. Do you do the same thing when you draw one of Nami's sexy faces? Do you make an "Ooh-la-la" face?

O: Of course. I'm famous with the local public for my sexy faces. They think I might be hotter than a magazine model queen.

D: Yo! So, this is the first time we've talked, Ei-chan. (Ehehe!) I'm so EMBARRASSED! Anyway, I have a question. "Buggy the Clown" can split himself in pieces, right? Which means he can also do it DOWN THERE, if you catch my drift... I can't get any more specific! Don't make me say it! Don't draw anything until you answer this question!!

D: I am the president of the "International Somehow Okay Hair League" (SBS, chapter 58). Restaurant owner Zeff-san's is a splendid specimen, in color, length, gloss, everything!! So we have decided that Zeff-san shall be the "41st Somehow Okay Hair Champion"! Congratulations. Oda-sensei, any comments?!

O: Er... I can't help but be curious about who the previous forty champions were.

D: I've been thinking about something for a while. How can Arlong wear a ring on his fingers when his hands are webbed?

O: That's because they go straight through his fingers. Like, jabbed straight through. They're more like piercings than rings.

D: (Episode I) Odacchi, will you save meee?! This Yamada guy who lives next door looks like a fishman. And to prove it, he's got gills near his face... Ah, oooh, it's really cold all of a sudden... I wonder if I turned the air conditioner a little too high. NO! IT's BLOODLUST!! FVWOW (Lightsaber-igniting sound). To be continued...

D: How far can Buggy separate himself? I'm so interested I've been growing okay hair for three straight days.

O: Buggy? Well... Let's just say there's a cutoff point. Apparently, if he's any further away from his parts after that, he loses control. But more importantly, since you're growing okay hair, why don't you enter yourself in that "Okay Hair Contest" they were just talking about? Hmm?

D: Okay, here we go!! Start the SBS corner!!

O: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!! YAAAAYYYYY!! I printed this one where it's totally out of place!! Take that!! There have been a whole lot of letters like this lately. A whole lot.

D: On p.78 of Volume 9, you can see the characters for "Koi" (Love) and "Sake" (Ale). Those wouldn't be plays on "Koi" (Carp) or "Sake" (Salmon), would they? You wouldn't do that, would you, sensei? I trust you... By the way, what kind of fishmen are they?

O: W-Wow, that little gag is so old, I'd forgotten all about it. Uhhh... Next, please...

D: Hello!! This is a postcard to Oda-sensei, obviusly. Oh! I forgot to introduce myself. I am "Timmy Maiko"! Does the word "Timmy" remind you of anything...? Yes... Oh Yes! "Timmy Ueda"! I'm kind of like a sister to Ueda. You might recall him from Volume 10. I sent this postcard in to thank you for including him... Hee(x2)! And as his sister of sorts, I will end this before Oda-sensei can. Why? Because I am a member of the SBS-Hijacking Group after all.