Become a Fan

Support the Revolution!

Connect with WDR

WDR Shirts

Who Dey Revolution Manifesto

Preamble

IN THIS TIME of perpetual Cincinnati Bengals incompetence and futility, with zero playoff wins in the nineteen seasons since the WhoDeyRevolution Godfather, Paul Brown, passed away in 1991 and handed the team to his fortunate son, the Despot, Mike Brown;

Introduction

WE, the members of the Who Dey Revolution, in our fervent dedication to the Cincinnati Bengals and fanatical desire to transform our hometown team into perpetual Super Bowl contenders, call for a popular revolution of fans to demand comprehensive reform to the managerial decisions and approach of Cincinnati Bengals ownership, management, staff and players, and hereby call for the adoption of the following Who Dey Revolution Manifesto:

Manifesto Demands

THAT the Mike Brown, Katie Blackburn, Marvin Lewis, along with every other member of the Bengals management, staff and personnel, state publicly to all Bengals fans, “I will do everything in my power to help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl;”

THAT Mike Brown will hire a general manager, drastically expand the scouting department and relinquish all control of player personnel;

THAT all training, rehabilitation and medical facilities are considered best-in-class compared to other NFL teams;

THAT the management fill the team only with players who fit the system, both mentally and physically, and are not reluctant to makes changes to player personnel when needed, regardless of cost or loyalty concerns;

THAT offensive and defensive line depth is considered the top priority for all player personnel decisions;

THAT all decisions made by ownership, management, staff and players, both on and off the field, are judged only by this criterion: “Does this help the Cincinnati Bengals win a Super Bowl?”

f***

July 29, 2011

This offseason was bad before the last 48 hours. In sum, Carson Palmer, the franchise and dominant factor in what limited success the Bengals ever had under Mike Brown, threatened to retire if he wasn't traded and forgoe AN AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU WOULD THAT YOU WOULD MURDER YOUR OWN MOTHER TO HAVE FOR YOURSELF. In typical dipshit fashion, Mike Brown escalates the stand off and CARSON WILL ACTUALLY FUCKING RETIRE. AT AGE 31.

Then, THEN, as if voluntarily sending the core of the franchise into early retirement and getting no value in return wasn't enough...free agency hits and the Bengals execute their strategy...which literally amounts to Mike Brown walking out into the middle of PBS and taking a HUGE DUMP ON THE FIELD. Allow me to explain.

Factoring in that Carson's salary is gone from the books, the Bengals are TENS OF MILLIONS of dollars below the alleged salary floor assuming they keep everyone else on the roster in tact. FLOOR. NOT CAP. FLOOR. In case you don't understand the implications that means:

They either spend money signing free agents (including their own) to get to the floor

They don't spend anything, remain below the floor, and pay the difference without any DISCRETION WHATSOEVER BASED ON PLAYER'S MARKET VALUES OR MERITS

The only sane decision is BUY SOME FUCKING FREE AGENTS IN POSITIONS OF NEED. WHICH IS, LIKE, ALMOST EVERY POSITION. The Bengals notoriously never spend money in free agency (Coles & Bryant don't count, they were just replacing a departed TJ), but now, for once, they had not just the green light, but a BONAFIDE MANDATE TO SPEND SOME DOLLARS. Awesome, right? Well here is what the Bengals have done:

For starters, they traded Chad Johnson for about 90% less than they could have when he asked out YEARS ago. Think what you will about Chad now, but he was the only remaining veteran presence at WR, he was among the only bright spots in the past 20 years, and he was a MEGA TALENT. More practically, he would have counted for another $6 million towards the floor, which is $6 million of your fan money that Mike Brown couldn't totally WASTE. But now we are even further under the floor.

So then, you might think, "okay fine, Chad had long departed in spirit and effort anyway and it was time to move on. Plus, now we have to spend EVEN more so we can definitely make some moves." The defense is basically the Bengals only hope. It contains their only proven elite asset: their cornerbacks. GREAT, at least we can fucking lock them both down now since we gotta spend the money. Nope, Jonathan Joseph will now be a Texan FOR NO LOGICAL REASON AT ALL. GODDAMMIT.

Chad gone. JJoe gone. Now we're even further under the floor again. AND WE JUST CUT ANTAWN ODOM. WHO SUCKS NOW BUT WHATEVER WE GOT TO SPEND THE MONEY ANYWAY. AND SIGNING BRIAN LEONARD IS NOT A SOLUTION. THOMAS HOWARD HAS TWO FIRST NAMES. HE'S NOT TO BE TRUSTED!!! AND GRADKOWSKI? DIE!!!!!!!

I expect lunacy out of the Bengals front office. It's why this site exists. But even this behavior goes beyond what I ever thought capable.

Everything that was ever good, however limited, about the Bengals is sprinting for the exits. The man in charge not only remains uninterested in stopping this exodus, but he actually appears proud to continue causing it by standing by his terminally flawed and hypocritical "principles". More than that, things have spiraled so far out of control that every single decision the front office is making at this point appears to be the one that maximize the destruction of this Bengals team. Seriously, every choice they have made so far, from refusing to trade Carson and Chad, to releasing players this free agency (Odom), to failing to resign players despite having overwhelming resources (JJoe), to driving out ones who just want a chance (Mathis)...literally every choice inflicts maximum damage to this team. They have been bad before. Oh have they been bad. But this is a new level. It is so FUCKED and I see no hope to UNFUCK it.

How do the Bengals even meet the floor at this point? Our own beat reporter, Joe Reedy says this:

The debt ceiling problem is an easier one to solve

And you know what? HE'S RIGHT. What will likely end up happening is that we will blow equal money on mediocre replacements for everyone who has left or Mike Brown refuses to trade, saddling the team with shitty contracts not just this season but in the future, for players we will likely want to stab rather than watch. And you can bet Mike Zimmer, the best thing besides Carson Palmer to ever happen to Bengaldom, will flee for his life as soon as he can.

I can usually predict to some degree what dumb shit the Bengals will do (think bringing back Chris Henry, signing Pacman, letting Steinbach go, etc.) but this is a more virulent form of asshattery. It's so mindboggling idiotic that it makes me suspicious. And the only thing I can think of is that the salary floor is not going to really apply to the Bengals somehow. No, that can't be, right? Right? FUCKING RIGHT??!!! OMG LOOK AT THIS AND BE AFRAID.

So either the Bengals have finally, after two decades, completely disintegrated in terms of their ability to even function as an organization...or they are cynically dumping salary to simply cash in on a revenue-sharing-without-salary-floor BONANZA.

Important Update: from Pro Football Talk comes a simple outline of the CBA. In 2011-2012 teams must spend in aggregate 99% of the salary cap. So while there is no floor this year, the Bengals would have to make it all up in 2012 by going WAY over the cap if they continue to do nothing. Verbatim: "This helps ensure teams that were way under the cap in recent years like the Bengals and Bucs spend more." The rant above still applies. <=this entire paragraph likely wrong, will clarify later

Update: the Bengals have "$49 million of cap room" according to John Clayton. Also, not only did JJoe walk away, according to Lance the Bengals have waived Morgan Trent and put Pacman on the PUP list. So now our secondary is Leon Hall, Cris Crocker and Mike Zimmer's icy stare.

In related news, Ray Edwards, a serviceable free agent replacement for Odom, will also not be a Bengal. He will go Atlanta instead.

October 11, 2010

Since I didn't get to watch the game this weekend, I can't comment on the actual X's & O's this week, but I can comment on this: I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF BRATKOWSKI'S BULLSHIT PLAY CALLING & LEWIS FALLING ON THE SWORD FOR HIM.

Following the game on my iPhone thanks to ESPN’s Game-tracker on my drive home from Virginia Beach, for three quarters, it looked like things were going pretty well: a couple of nice long scoring drives, but it didn’t look like I was missing anything too dramatic outside of the TO TD, and Benson's performance. Then we get to the fourth quarter, and "SQUIRREL!"

First of all, Lewis’s excuse that they were being aggressive is complete horseshit, and the media needs to call him out on this. The play calling speaks for itself.

Bucs get the ball back on starting on their own 20 with 4:51 left in the game. Zimmer forces them into three downs and out, and the Bengals get the ball back starting on their own 41 with 3:17 left to play. They are only 60 yards away from ending the game with a statement, or if they can just get a couple of first downs and we walk off the field with another unconvincing win.

Brat comes out guns blazing on first down: Benson up the gut for zero yards; 2-10, Benson off LT for a 2 yard gain.

Before I go any further, if you are attacking the Bucs to end the game by being aggressive as Lewis claimed, you don’t come out with two running plays most likely against eight men in the box. I am assuming the Bucs put eight in the box since they most likely knew the Bengals were going to try to run out the clock (please correct me if I am wrong about this). If you are aggressive, you come out and call a play action pass to take advantage of the defense looking for the run. I would have been 100% in support of being aggressive and taking this risk because it could have put the game away with one play. Instead, the Bengals were basically running against a wall that our OL is not good enough to break through. Forget the idea that we were averaging over 6 yards a carry for the game, it doesn't apply when the opposing defense stacks the deck to shut down the run. Sure enough, we tried to run out the clock and we weren't able to move the ball against a defense looking for it. REAL AGGRESSIVE PLAY CALLING ASSHOLE.

Next play is a false start on Gresham, pushing it to 3rd & 13 with 2:28 to play. From the highlights, the Bucs bring out what looks to be their dime package. Brat decides to still go for the first ignoring the potential disaster. Unfortunately Palmer doesn’t check down into his favorite laizze fare running play that has probably only netted us 10 yards in the past three seasons. Sure enough Palmer forces the throw into tight covereage and its behind TO. Results in 7 points for the Bucs.

This had to be the stupidest play call I have ever witnessed, second to Belicheck’s crazy forth down play call a couple of years ago. This “aggressive” play is nothing but a culmination of his incompetent decisions. You don’t throw the ball when the Bucs are expecting it, have their dime package on the field, and there is less then two and half minutes to play with only a seven point lead. In this case, there is too much to lose so do the always unsuccessful draw play and punt the ball to make the Bucs drive 80+ yards with less than 2 minutes left.

Ironically, it was only a couple of weeks ago that I called for his head because Bratkowski was too conservative against the Ravens and it almost cost us the game. I would have been perfectly fine with that approach Sunday.

If you want to be aggressive and attack the defense, then DO IT WHEN THEY AREN'T EXPECTING IT! Unfortunately, Mike Brown is not going to mess with his hand picked staff and this dumb ass is staying put to make my Sundays suck.

I would accept a Brian Billick hiring over continuing with this asshole, and from the looks of it TO would tend to agree since it sounds like he doesn’t like Brats route trees either. The video's cut right to the good stuff. My favorite part is his statement that he's been around some "great football minds"...the implication being he's not exactly seeing the same thing from his offensive coaching here.

September 29, 2010

The fatally flawed Bengals team that backed its way into the playoffs last year appears to be the same one we decided to field this year. Someone please explain to me how I'm wrong.

Other random thoughts:

Some calls for a renewal of Project Mayhem are starting to appear in the comments. Suggestions are always welcome, though I don't know how welcome the broader Bengals fanbase will be towards negative pranks during what will likely be a winning stretch for the Bengals.

More specifically, folks want a PM focused on getting Brat fired. While that may be the most obvious personnel change that any team needs to make in the entire NFL right now, I doubt it will ever happen even with PM pressure. I'm so uninspired by the Bengals right now I don't have the energy to find the link, but google "ESPN Liz Merrill Zimmer Bratkowski" and read the article you find. It will inform you Brat and Zim have been good buddies for a long time. As a loyal soldier to Mikey Boy and friend of Zim, Bratwurst ain't going anywhere. And if Marvin doesn't resign and Zim takes over, I doubt Zim will fire or lobby the Brown's to fire his buddy. Brat will be here as long as he wants to be here I guess. And we are fucked.

Speaking of, any news of the Marvin contract negotiations? My guess is he's gone. Zimmer takes over a for a little, then leaves at first opportunity.

I used to be Carson's number 1 apologist. I now think more likely the Bengals institutionalized incompetence caused Carson to slowly atrophy starting in 2006. Injuries too.

My pessimism is the highest it's been about the Bengals since we launched this site in 2008 and we brought back Chris Henry. With the lockout and 18 game schedule idiocy my pessimism is also the highest for the NFL that it may ever have been.

August 31, 2010

I wish I had time to get to this yesterday but was busy scrambling after the weekend. While ultimately I can find comedy and a silver-lining with the high profile Antonio Bryant disaster, I can find nothing of the sort with the Bengals decision to let go of Rashad Jeanty. Similar to how the Bengals buried the decision to bring the hugely unpopular Brat back in an article about the extension of the hugely popular Mike Zimmer, the Bengals slipped the release of Jeanty into a casual "Update" mostly about the cutting of Bryant. I first saw the news via Joe Reedy who also appeared surprised and rightly described the move as "a shocker".

The Bengals did this, I would imagine, because both moves sucked and they wanted to avoid the attention.

Well, Jeanty's agent seems determined to make sure that never happens. He came out blazing, publicly criticizing the Bengals for mishandling Jeanty's injury and creating this predicament in the first place. Good for him. For those counting, that's yet another instance of questionable medical judgment by the Bengals staff, and the second in as many days. But we'll come back to that issue another time.

Instead, I'd prefer to simply note that this is all very shitty. Because Jeanty a) is a raging bad ass, b) provides critical depth at linebacker, c) provides stability in the locker room and d) is just the type of guy the Bengals should reward, not punish. I enjoyed Cnati.com while it existed and perhaps my favorite piece they ever produced was this profile of Rashad Jeanty. I throw out lots of links. Make sure you read it. Here it is again. Just in case. Some quotes:

"He probably has the highest pain tolerance of anyone in the world," said fellow linebacker Keith Rivers.

(on missing 2nd half a game after broken bone pierced out through the skin) "It's hard to let your teammates down. I feel bad, I've got to be down to not play," Jeanty said. "It's how I feel, I have to play for my teammates. To hell with me, it's for my teammates. I take pride in that, I'm sensitive about my teammates."

Despite starting 15 games for the Bengals at Sam linebacker in 2008, he was pushed from starter to backup when the team selected Rey Maualuga in the second round of the draft. Despite playing the same position, Jeanty has served as a mentor to Maualuga.

I could keep going but I'll stop there. Literally every sentence in the article reinforces what a remarkably tough, selfless, and dedicated teammate Jeanty was. So to see it end abrubtly and potentially due to the Bengals own ineptitude fucking pisses me off. And just when I thought I couldn't get more pissed off, I read Rob Weintraub's twitter feed and saw yet another take:

Strange that Mike Brown--Mr. Open Arms for erratic knuckleheads--would chuck a good soldier like Rashad so cavalierly.

(nodding head in agreement)

Anyway, as Mr Weintraub goes onto note, forget the Bryant thing, this release is the one that is truly awful. Was Jeanty a super critical piece necessary for a playoff run, well, hopefully not. But who knows? And more importantly, who cares? Even if Jeanty ultimately was expendable, the circumstances of his release reflects horribly on the Bengals. Welcome to Bengals fandom, where even during an offseason of promise and excitement, Mike Brown still seems to find a way to taint it.

I hope Jeanty lands on a team where he will be appreciated. He deserves better than the jokers who run the Bengals.

December 11, 2009

Knew it was coming but it still sucks. Part of me was hoping it was all some big bait and switch to humiliate Notre Dame. The ND fans would be all excited, the press conference would be held, Brian would walk up on the podium wearing a ND hat, and then: