844 days, 20,256 hours, 1,215,360 minutes, or 72,921,600 seconds. That is the approximate duration of my world tour. I never wanted it to end and now, in a manner of speaking, I suppose it never has to. If you wish to go by country do so by clicking on one above. They are numbered in the order I visited them, more or less. If you enjoy reading about it even a tenth as much as I enjoyed living it then you will not have wasted your time. Grab a refreshing beverage, settle in a comfortable chair, and make a journey across the world, experiencing it as I did. Then get off your ass and check it out for yourself. You're not getting any younger.

Gokyo to Lukla via Renjo La (Three Passes Trek, Nepal) Part VII

April
1st, 2010- I mentioned that it was beginning to snow as I
crossed the glacier and made my way to Gokyo. Well, it did not stop
for a while and I estimate that by the time it was over last least
six inches (fifteen centimeters) was dumped upon the region. I love
snow as much as the next guy but I still had another mountain pass to
cross so I found the weather developments decidedly inconvenient.
When I awoke the next morning I thought my designs on the Rengo La
would be foiled.

A snow
covered trail solo in the Himalayas? I might be crazy but I isn't
stupid……probably. However, Lady Luck would have a hand in my
forward progress. From the window in the sun/dining room of my lodge
I watched as a group of tourists led by what I presume to be their
guide and seven yaks made their way towards the pass. Although I was
slightly astonished by this I was also supremely grateful as they
would blaze a trail through the snow that would be easy to follow,
assuming no more snowfall of course. Score.

I was
also thankful for having crossed the Ngozumpa Glacier the previous
day as doing so on the following day would have been near nigh
impossible, at least without a guide. I had little hope of seeing the
Other Rich again as I was quite certain that he would not be crossing
the glacier but instead skip Goyko and head south towards Lukla via
another trail. Wrong again.

So
after breakfast it was time to go for a stroll up nearby Gokyo
Ri. It would prove to be most challenging for two reasons: 1) the
aforementioned snow; and 2) the intensity of solar radiation. The
snow and ice were no picnic but nothing compared with the heat from
Mr. Helios. It
was a hazy day and the thin cloud cover served only to intensify the
ultra violet light. Moving slow was imperative as the danger of
overheating was pronounced. I was sorry I wore pants. Actually, I was
sorry I wore any clothes at all but since I did not have enough sun
cream to cover my entire body it was probably for the best. I am
willing to bet the temperature on the way up was no less than 60
degrees Fahrenheit (15 degrees Celsius) on the trail. I almost felt
like going for dip in the frozen lake beside Goyko.

When I
did make it to the top I was rewarded with a degraded view of the
nearby mountains (Everest, Lhotse, Makalu, and Cho Oyu). That is not
to say the view was terrible only diminished relative to what I had
witnessed thus far. Essentially, I had been spoiled. Cry me a glacial
river.

That's Gokyo Ri behind the snoozing yak

Gokyo from above

They
way down was much more expeditious due in no small part to the fact
that I spent much of the return sliding on my feet. I did manage to
avoid going ass or tea kettle. A moral victory.

On
my ascent I met a German woman (Madeleine) who was exceedingly
outgoing and friendly (not to mention physically appealing) and
invited me to stop by her lodge after my hike for a hot beverage. As
I stood I thought to myself, Yep,
you got it going on you sly devil you. I
was right on the money if by 'it' I mean an uncanny ability to
misinterpret and engage in delusional self-aggrandizement regarding a
potentially romantic encounter. After my climb I stopped by her lodge
to say hello and was met by her and her husband. Yep,
you got it going on you sly devil you. I'm
all that and a bowl of grits.

My
time spent with Madeleine was not in vain as I was reunited with the
Other Rich (admittedly he was not nearly as attractive but with the
right wig and a bit of rouge….). It turns out he hired a guide and
made his way across the glacier after all. Apparently, it was no
pleasure stroll and had him trudging through a glacial moraine
covered in snow. Hidden rocks and boulders became the equivalent of
Himalayan land mines. But he made it. After catching up a bit I said
my final farewell to my clone and went back to my hotel for dinner
and an early retirement. I had the Renjo La in my sights and the next
day would be 'go' time. I had hoped I would meet another group or
individual headed my way but no such luck. For the final pass it
would be me, myself, and I. Solitude would reign supreme.

One
more pass. I arose promptly the next morning, threw down as much
breakfast as I could, and set off. The weather was exquisite and I
left Gokyo in high spirits. No intensive mental processes required.
All I had to do was follow the trail of yak and people prints. Easy.

Dead
horse time. What can I say? I found myself once again enveloped by
the haunting solitude that is the Himalayas (at least if you are
alone that is). Just me and the result of 70 million years of
continental collisions. Along the way I took time to just stand there
and absorb the brilliance. I did this not only out of cosmogonic
appreciation but also because the grinding nature of the sojourn was
beginning to catch up with me. I was a little pooped. As I drew
closer to the slope below the pass my motivation was on the decline.
If you listened to my inner voice (something nobody probably wants to
do) it sounded something like this: No. No up. Richie no want
go up. Richie want go down. Up bad. Very, very bad. Up can kiss
Richie's ass. No uppy. Make it stop.

Along
the way Mother Nature provided entertainment in the form of my own
private avalanche viewing. Two thumbs up. I suppose if I wanted to
dwell on this experience a bit I could go in the 'if a tree falls
in the woods but no one is around to hear it does it make a
sound?' direction. In this case I was the only sentient
mortal in the entire universe to be ringside for this natural
exhibition. Only me. It will never happen again and once I am no
longer among us it will be as if it never happened in the first
place. Kind of blows your mind, huh? Or not. The same could be said
for just about anything. Being the only one around to hear a mountain
gorilla fart is not the kind of existential poetry answer seekers
long for. But then again…

I did
manage to reach the pass fairly early and was presented with the view
I had hoped I would see on the top of Gokyo Ri. Not so many clouds on
this morning. Another pass, another dazzling panorama.
Ho-friggin-hum. Well, not really but I imagine reading the same
description over and over again gets to be a bit tedious. I suppose I
should dig a little deeper into my thesaurus. The views were superb,
admirable, august, best, breathtaking, choice, elegant, elevated,
exalted, exquisite, fine, glorious, grand, great, lofty, magnificent,
majestic, marvelous, matchless, noble, optimal, optimum, outstanding,
peerless, prime, proud, resplendent, solid, splendid, splendiferous,
splendorous, standout, stunning, sublime, super, superior,
superlative, unrivaled, the very best indeed.

I
lingered for a spell gazing from the pass east and west pondering the
scene all by my lonesome. The truth is sometimes I want someone to be
there to share the Kodak moment and other times I am content to sit
in silence alone and pretend I am the only being in our solar system.
Had I had the mental fortitude I may have assumed the position and
put forward my best meditative effort. However, at that point I was
in no condition to summon the powers of my own psyche. I took a rain
check. Next mountain range.

That's Everest on the left

Mt. Makalu, Everest impersonator

View from other side of Renjo La

Now it
was time to head down, oh most glorious down. There are times when
the descent can be more of a chore than slugging your way up a steep
incline. Thankfully, this was not one of those times. In fact not
only was there a nice trail through the snow to follow there was
also, for reasons beyond me, a set of stairs constructed out of
stones ushering the way. It was still a tad dicey as the tracks from
the previous day were icy but it was a general improvement from what
I'd encountered on the previous passes. The track from Gokyo to Thame
is slated for ten hours in the book but I managed to do it in about
seven and a half.

Along
the way I met a guy that appeared to be carrying his entire life on
his back. Not really sure where he was from as I could not place his
accent but he seemed a little off (I wonder if that's others' general
impression of me as I coming bopping along the trail?). He said
something to me about setting up high camp for a trekking peak, not
realizing there were none close by, moving on to the pass, something,
something, so forth and so on. High camp? I wanted to ask him what
the hell he was talking about but I was afraid he might actually tell
me. He was either one of those clueless semi-lunatics that will end
up freezing while trying to eat his own underwear or a mountaineering
prodigy/savant that never quite came to grips with everyday social
interaction. No way to be sure. I pressed on.

As I
ventured downward I passed through small villages and abandoned
summer grazing areas that gave the whole area an 'edge of
civilization' feel to it. The clouds eventually rolled in casting
that dismal semi-apocalyptic shadow that makes one feel like you are
trying to find that last hidden enclave of survivors. As you can
imagine fatigue was starting to set in leading to series of
circus-type slips and falls. As the day wore on the snow on the trail
began to soften providing a slip n' slide like arena for me to
negotiate. Falling on your ass four or five times does little to
soften one's disposition and had me swearing like an intoxicated
truck driver at times. But I pressed on.

Sometime
around three or four in the afternoon I arrived in Thame in the midst
of a light snowfall. Thame is a quaint little village nestled in the
valley beneath Kongde Ri. What gives it its charm is the manicured
nature of the village. The stone walls are well maintained and the
buildings are all constructed out of stone. And unlike most places
along the trail this is an actual village that exists for reasons
other than tourists. In fact Thame lies along the ancient trade route
between Khumbu and Tibet which includes the Nangpa La pass (In 2006
Chinese soldiers opened fire here on
Tibetan pilgrims making their way to join the Dalai Lama in India).

Thame
is also the original home of Apa
Sherpa otherwise known as Super Sherpa as a result of having
summited Everest 19 times [Author's Note: As of May 2011 he added
ascent 20 and 21 to his CV]. That is not a typo. He is not apparently
borne of the earthly realm. I just happened to stumble into the
Everest Summiteer, the lodge he owns. I had dreams of meeting the man
but they were dashed when I learned that he lives in Salt Lake City,
Utah. The walls of the dining room were basically a shrine to the man
and his family (educational certificates belonging to his sons also
adorned the walls). I've read that his actual age is not known but
estimates put him somewhere in his fifties. Personally, I think that
is the perfect age to make a twentieth ascent of the planet's highest
summit. Apparently, so does he. This May he is going for number
twenty. I'm all about tempting fate but this guy is on another plane
of existence.

I had
a bit of a late start the following morning (8 am) and was really
starting to feel the trip. I think my brain started to sense that the
end was near and began sending signals to my body that it was okay to
take a breather. My motivation was just not there either. My goal was
to get all the way to Lukla that day so I could catch a plane the
following morning. I was not entirely sure this would happen. I had
an open plane ticket but who knows if a seat would be available let
alone if the weather would permit take-offs and landings (In 2008 a
Yeti Airlines flight went down just below the airstrip killing 18
passengers and crew). Luckily, when I arrived back in Namche Bizarre
my cell phone once again became more than a mere alarm clock. I made
a call to my travel agent and secured a seat on a morning flight.
Looks like I would be going to Lukla that day after all.

I
would have to say that the most challenging part of the journey came
on the last two hours of the trip from Phakding to Lukla. My body
just did not want to go and my mind was already back at my hotel in
Kathmandu. As I had already passed this way it was not terribly
exciting so boredom was a factor and the minutes dragged on. I was
also a bit irritable and was in no mood to do things like wait for a
train of yaks to cross a suspended foot bridge suitable only for one
way traffic. This is especially true when I am already half way
across the bridge and the yak driver ushers his herd of pack laden
animals on the bridge anyway knowing I would have no choice but to
turn around and walk back the way I had come. The fact that he yelled
and gave me a dismissive hand gesture did nothing to improve my
disposition. Actually, it made me want to smack him when he crossed
the bridge. I am sure my countenance conveyed ever iota of vitriol I
was harboring at that moment. Of course, this was nothing more than
childish petulance stemming from fatigue but he is lucky I did not go
spider monkey on his ass and start flinging my own pooh. Instead I
pressed on.

Lukla Airport

In
retrospect my timing was impeccable. I'd entered the region and
completed my trek before the tourist herd assaulted Khumbu. I was
extremely thankful for that and the hordes of human yaks I passed on
the way out underscored my sentiment.

I
arrived back in Lukla and did something I'd neglected to do for
eleven straight days: showered. My guide book pointed me to a lodge
that even had hot water. Never in my life have I appreciated hot
water more. Had I been given the choice between that and an evening
with a female Danish beach volley squad I would have had to seriously
consider my options (ideally the two would be combined). It was
sublime.

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