You might have to give this up, especially if you really want your dream.

With the debut of my first book, Making Work Work, less than 30 days away (woohoo!), I’ve been asked a lot of questions about the book-writing process.

I was thinking about writing a blog post to specifically answer those questions, but I don’t want to bore the good folks reading this who have zero interest in writing a book (and I wouldn’t blame them!) But seriously, if anyone is interested in the nuts and bolts of the process, I’d be happy to write about it one day.

Until then, let’s talk about the part of the process that affects everyone. It’s the advice that I wish knew prior to starting, and as usual in my life, it’s advice that I ended up learning the hard way:

If you want to achieve your life’s dream, you must make peace with the fact that you’re going to have to give up something in order to achieve it.[Read more…]

Do you think that you’ve fooled the world into believing that you’re smart and capable? Then you might suffer from the Impostor Syndrome.

Have you felt it before?

The sinking feeling that you’ve been fooling everyone into thinking that you’re better, smarter and more qualified than you really are?

If so, there’s an official name for this issue.

This insidious mind virus is known as The Impostor Syndrome, and here’s an excellent definition of it, courtesy of Fast Company:

Impostor syndrome is a psychological phenomenon in which people are unable to see their own accomplishments, dismissing them as luck, timing, or as a result of deceiving others into thinking they are more intelligent and competent than they believe themselves to be.”

The good news is that if you’re thinking that you’re alone in feeling like a fraud–you’re not. I’m right there with you.

Here’s my story, and more importantly, here’s how we can win the fight against Impostor Syndrome, starting today. [Read more…]

Yeah…I’m guessing that this guy probably thinks that he’s better than you.

Here is what I believe.

If you’re the type of guy/gal who is super sweet and nice to the CEO (or any executive) of your company, but you also consistently treat the janitors or the front line staff in your company like crap, then there’s no doubt in my mind that you’re a horrible person.

Yeah, I said it.

Sadly, I’m starting to lose count of the amount of people who I encounter at work, and outside of work, who act this way. It’s sickening, it’s destructive, and most of all, it has to stop.

What if you could inspire this reaction in everyone you met? Well, maybe you can.

Last month I was traveling for business, and I was grabbing a bite to eat inside of an incredibly busy airport restaurant.

The guy who was serving me was visibly stressed out, sweating profusely, and became extremely flustered when I asked him basic questions about the menu. So, I put the menu down and looked him in the eye and gently asked him a question.

“Hey man, not to pry…but, are you okay?”

It was crazy–just the act of asking him that simple question changed his entire demeanor. It was like a 50 lb weight was lifted off of his back.

He sighed, and then he told me that he just started at the restaurant yesterday and that this was his first shift alone. He then shared how much he needed this job, and how determined he was not to screw up this opportunity, even though he (admittedly) barely knew what was on the menu.

Unfortunately, we didn’t chat for very long because he was being pulled in every direction by all of the customers he was serving–many of which, were not very kind or patient with him.

I felt terrible for him–he was clearly trying his best, and I wanted to do something to help. So, when my bill came, I left him a tip that was more than the price of the meal (in case you’re mistaking me for a big baller, it was only $20), and a note that said:

That might sound strange (or insensitive) for me to say, especially if you’re dealing with something really painful in your life right now.

What is the “gift” in going through a divorce, dealing with a bully boss, or struggling to make ends meet financially? That doesn’t even begin to mention the impossibility of finding a “gift” in developing a life-altering medical condition, having a child die, or being the victim of sexual assault.

To be very clear, I am in no way saying that those events are a gift. They’re not, and it would be insulting for anyone to say otherwise.

What I am saying is that after an intensely painful event, many people do uncover a special gift that they might have been unaware of before:

Meet Shola

Hi, my name is Shola and I'm the founder of The Positivity Solution. I'm a corporate trainer, incurable optimist, and writer who is committed to changing the world by helping as many people as possible to live and work more positively. Click on the "About" link on the main menu bar to get the full scoop on my story.

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