It seemed like seconds after we were whisked into Myanmar with no passport and no gear for passport photos, we were sitting, packs in hand, in the back of our private truck. Basking in the glory of not having to be on that truck. The highlight of the video is that awesome guy on the cell phone. Of note is the conversation about being late for the bus to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kengtung, Kyaingtong, Chiang Tung, Cheingtung, or Kengtong.

Mo and I had a mindset to do everything as cheap as possible. I believe this irked our fellow, f-bomb dropping traveller whom Mo had told does not factor into the decision process. The harsh logic, part of a constant mind game to sell you on some ridiculous bullshit. Possibly his best quality. We definitely would have bitched about needing to take a private truck.

In the well-travelled city of Mandalay, these guys are famous for their street side chapatis and curry. Well deserved bread flipping effects are noticeable. Can you hear them?

Stop 1 on the motorcycle tour up to Hsipaw in Shan territory. The food in Myanmar is some of the best I’ve had whilst travelling. I would say better than Thai food upon first experience. Since going back to Thailand, I’ve come to embrace their cuisine more but who knows what I’d find in Burma on a return visit.

Travellers from Thailand always want the damn chocolate banana crepes. These were much better. All curry, greasy, eggy goodness. What more could you want, besides a camera operator that knows how to use the manual focus.

Kengtung was our first stop on our overland travel from Chiangmai in Thailand to Mongla in Special Region 4.

What’s the name of that one cartoon character that loves doughnuts? He always goes on about how good they are by exclaiming a series of ms. That guy would have loved these. The sweetness is overpowering but I’m starting to get a handle on sugar filled pastries. Such a more intense hit than the hidden sugar molecules found in western treats.
Below is an exerpt from a conversation I heard:
“Fuck it. Let’s just put in a bunch of raw sugar.”
“Should we mix it in?”
“Nope. Just put it in there to cover the dried shaved coconut.”

But man oh man did they ever do it with love for such vulgar dudes. Myanmar is a magical place.

The cheroot, possibly the greatest name for a smokable substance perhaps second to the bidi. A permanent fixture in Myanmar. The Myanma men seem to prefer cigarettes over cheroots but search around the internet and you’ll see badass pictures of older women putting Snoop Dogg to shame with these lovely creations. The factory precision of this woman is shocking. The smoke itself is surprisingly flavourful and a little sweet. It consists of leaf and woody bits from the root of the plant. Apparently it’s used to freshen the mouth…not surprising in a country of dental disaster due to the glorious betel nut.

Good evening. I hope you’re all well and good. In this episode, we seem to skip an episode. Why is that? Did I overlook? I haven’t a clue but I’m sure I’ll get to the bottom of it one day. Perhaps what was missed will be found again or perhaps it was just missed. At any rate, here we find Episode 3 of Season 6 of ABaum’s Vinyl Mystery Hour. It’s the Vacation series. In this series, I planned to do a little time travel. It is relatively successful and I hope you enjoy. I’m off for the weekend to a far off locale. I hope that you make time in your busy day for such lovely things as a calming glimpse in to the world of vacation.

Mmmmmmmmmmm, here it is folks. 3 years in the making and every bit as old as it was when it was first recorded. This episode is guaranteed to make you shiver with excitement, cringe with fear and elate with joy unforeseen. Unfortunately, the musical selections are pretty solid. I’ll get back on track soon.

I swear this is the last time you’ll hear about this one massage…but this is the real deal. We’re talking hours after it happened folks. Will it happen this time?

I have returned. I arrived in Manitoba about a week ago and have just gained access to the internet. What a glorious day.

I figured I would start off by telling you all about my travels to this great land of Manitoba. On the first night of my trip I slept on a giant couch at a friends place in Vancouver. We went to a bar called Toby’s and saw some old friends that I hadn’t seen in quite some time. We all got good and drunk and at the end of the night were thoroughly harassed by the security guard at the bar. He would bother us every 5 minutes or so to inform us of the time remaining until close. It was quite annoying and we felt as if we were being singled out, probably because we were so hip, and he was quite the opposite. Envy is a powerful motive.

After being bothered a few times, we went and smoked on the patio, but power trip security jerk showed up to put the brakes on our fun. He made us put out our cigarettes. After that, a few people in the group decided that some kind of retaliation was in order and so they left the bar with their glasses of beer in hand. The security douche came running outside chasing after us yelling “OHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOO, BRING THOSE BACK! I’M CALLING THE RCMP!” He then proceeded to slap a drink out of one of the girls hands and it smashed on the ground. He grabbed another drink from one of the other girls and then there was one guy left in our group with a beer. He was not ready to give up his beer and what followed next was a slight tug o’ war style struggle for the beer. It looked something like this.

At some point the guy in our group decided it was not worth it, and let go of the beer. I think the glass smashed on the ground as well. The security loser then yelled out “YOU’RE BANNED FOR LIFE!” as he scurried into the bar. Everything after this point is kind of a blur. Pizza was eaten. Houses were visited. Sleeping ensued.

After Vancouver, in a slightly tired and hungover state, I made my way to Calgary, an 11 hour drive, and stayed the night in some seedy motel. There I ate some delicious chicken and shrimp gumbo from boston pizza while watching a psychedelic freak out movie from the seventies that was on tv. It was rad, wish I could find out the name.

After Calgary, I drove to Regina. On the way there, I took a dump in some roadside washroom. Inside the stall was written

“MUSLUM TEROR MUST DIE!“

I found the spelling mistakes and placement of the note comical. Toilet stalls are no place for pro anti terrorism graffiti IMHO.

In Regina I met up with two friends and drank beers and ate food. Went and saw Star Trek the movie. Do yourself a favor and go watch it. It is quite amazing. Looking forward to the next one.

Afte regina, I visited my old park and saw some of the people there. They were still rad. Then I made my way to my new Park and have been here since. So far the people are good and I am looking forward to the summer.