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Saturday's with Stef: DATING= SCARY

12:02 AM

I am not sure what makes me sexy to a man. Ive heard its my curves, Ive heard its the way I can make them laugh, Ive heard its the way I make them feel. Ive heard its my confidence, Ive heard it all---but what makes me sexy to me?

Maybe its just me in general....

So you may be wondering..."What's up with the sexy talk Stef?"

I'm scared to date...

THAT'S WHY.

The thought of being rejected again...SCARY!

But I want to date...

I want a guy to pick me up. Take me out and at the end of the night want to kiss. So he grabs my face and kisses me. Then texts me "Goodnight"

A guy who accepts me for me and has sweaty palms and all.

The guy who will make me laugh and feel those butterflies...

I DO want to date...

Just scared.

I wish I can honestly be those girls who date and date and date....but I'm not.

10 months ago I was BARELY getting out of a relationship and was convinced no one will ever want me (Sometimes still do). I bring this up because someone asked me out. At first I was like "Next week" blah blah blah...but yesterday I knew that if I don't say yes I will always say no.

I cant say no anymore.

I need to FLY....

Just scared....

That my wings wont be pretty enough, strong enough and will fail me...

11 comments:

If you were asked to go on a date is because he likes you somehow, so don't be insecure and say yes. If it goes well, great! and if not, it's okay, there will be more other dates. You're still young and beautiful!

I know what you are feeling. Dating is scary. I'm a single mom it's a little different but still the thought of me dating and if I'm ready scares me. Then it's like, how will my son (who's 3) and family feel about me dating. Sometimes I don't want to deal with the other factors that I just figured I shouldn't date.

Doll all I can say is dont be scared and take it as an opportunity to "make friends" that us right enjoy their company and just talk and hang out with them you will enjoy or know if you dont enjoy their company. If you go on a date thinking youll like the person right away it is scary but in reality not everyone clicks so take this as an opportunity to meet and make friends. I know I did when I was single and had so much fun with all the diff types of friends I made and all the things i learned from them.

I hope you are able to summon the courage to go out again, particularly if someone is asking you out. There are plenty of nice-looking women who don't even get ASKED out and they would do just about anything for a date! So you don't want to risk 'the well drying up' one day!

But you also don't want to get hurt again. It is okay to set 'limits' on how far you will go both emotionally and physically until you feel comfortable with him and yourself. You are very pretty and sexy... your voice and your curves are very alluring and I am sure that you don't mean to be so enticing, but YOU (who cares about the other 'I'm pretty too!' girls without dates!) are and sometimes that is a burden. You go out twice with a guy that you happen to like and he is trying to push up and get you into bed... no one wants to be charming and woo anyone anymore...

But you don't have to go out like that. I envy the young men who get a chance at you because I think you are going to be a great partner and you will BLOSSOM with the right man. But you don't have to catch anyone... they should have to catch YOU.

I would not tell anyone until AFTER you have decided to commit more to them emotionally about your uncertainties. A confident woman keep a cat on their toes... you play yourself out by acting insecure... trust me, I am a player!

Go out and have a good time!! Don't go too far no matter how good he looks or how hot you get... have fun and start getting back into the swing of things... and don't tell him you took time off..! Weakness, that is, and at a weakness he will strike!!

Honey dating itself is a very scary process but I'm sure that you will overcome whatever it is that is holding you back because I know you're an amazing girlfriend when in a relationship...I can just tell..the right one is just around the corner I'm sure! ;-)

your still young so date while you can. i feel the same sometimes, i feel we are all afraid of rejection but u no wat, life goes on. u never know where things will lead. and past relationships only help build for the future ones :)

Do you like the guy that asked you out?Take the pressure off from dating and all the icky-scary aspects of it and look at it in the point of view of just making friends with someone. If you are just going into dating like you meeting a male amigo then you can just be yourself, have fun. If there is "Rejection" from either one of you, Then let it be it. It should never be a reflection of your soul if someone "rejects" you (which I doubt it you are so cool, funny and lovable! I get that vibe from your posts). There are so many factors and so MANY people in the world to worry about a few clueless fools.

Have fun on your date whenever it is, just be the refreshing you, and ENJOY spending time with yourself and your new friend! OPA! (I just felt like saying that!LOL)