Animal masturbation

“Modern scientists agree: virtually all the higher animals – including parakeets and pigeons – are occasionally involved with their own genitalia.”– Mels Van Driel

Lions, primates, bats, walruses, deer, zebra, sheep, warthogs, hyenas, whales, dophins, cats and dogs are just some of the animals that are known to masturbate. They may use their flippers, their tails, their feet or their mouth. They rub their nipples, grab their genitals, rub against inanimate objects and essentially employ all the methods than humans do.

Female ferrets use smooth stones and penguins literally get their rocks off on rocks. Female porcupines are quite creative – they grab a stick between their front paws then ride it like a broom. As they drag the stick around with them the jolting and vibrating stimulates them.

Male bats, male walruses and female hyenas engage in auto-fellatio – female hyenas have a phallus-esque clitoris. Orangutans make use of twigs and leaves whilst tortoises bang their penis against hard objects.

Deer rub their antlers on the ground and can take as little as 15 seconds to satisfy themselves. Cetaceans rub themselves against the ocean floor.

Male elephants suck on their penis with their trunk and females nibble the nipples between their front legs whilst striking their vulva with their tail.

Male marine iguanas who don’t have much chance of mating – or who may start mating with a female but are likely to get kicked off by another male before they’ve copulated – are known to masturbate whenever a female goes by. It’s thought that this is because by masturbating they speed up the time it takes to ejaculate and thus, when they do get a chance with a girl, they can do the deed very quickly, before they get kicked off.

Other theories about why animals masturbate include mismatched sex ratios within a population, stress relief, being lower down the rank and hence not having the chance to have sex and the fresh ejaculate theory. The latter is the idea that “masturbating clears out the old sperm faster and makes room for newer, healthier sperm. Healthier sperm equals healthier babies” (Verdolin).

And of course, animals may masturbate because they find it pleasurable.

“While scientists debate the evolutionary reason for masturbation, there’s no doubt that humans are not alone in their self-pleasure from time to time.”— Clara Moskowitz, LiveScience Senior Writer

With animals that are similar to us, it can be easy to imagine how they have stimulate themselves but you may be wondering about birds. I was. Most birds have a cloaca – an opening used for sex and for expelling waste – and male birds will bend their tails under an object – such as a toy – and rub their cloaca against it. Females also rub their cloaca against an object but instead lift their tail and back up onto the item in question.

There isn’t much research into masturbation in the animal kingdom at this point so much of this is based on observations, both in the wild and in zoos where obviously there is no guarantee that the behaviour is natural. Species in which studies have been carried out include primates, domestic animals such as horses and ground squirrels.

The ground squirrels study was suggested that male masturbation may act as a form of genital grooming. As saliva has antibacterial properties, masturbation may reduce their risk of catching an STD. It may also clean the reproductive tracts. But this is clearly an area that requires a lot more research!

Whilst this blog post is entirely a bit of fun and a way to discuss masturbation in a less taboo way, it has a second purpose. That is to dispel all those myths that we should only have sex to procreate because it’s what’s natural. If you’ve read any of my animal and sex posts, you’ll know that sex in the animal kingdom is diverse, interesting and uninhibited. Sex has evolved to be pleasurable for many species (although not all it must be added) in order for the species to continue and why wouldn’t we – humans and other animals – engage in something that makes us feel good?