Wisdom of the Ages

Sharing leftovers…..

I hope you all a wonderful Thanksgiving, whether you work or not. It sounds like a cliché but no matter what our financial, physical or emotional situation, we all have something to be thankful for. My friend, W. Mitchell, author of “It's Not What Happens To You, It's What You Do About It” had terrible accidents within a short period of time. They left his face scarred, crippled his legs and arms and left him facing the fact that he would need a wheelchair to get around to the rest of his life. He says he had two choices - worry and whine about the 2000 things he could no longer do or concentrate the 1000 he still could do. I bet you can guess which he did.

The next important day is Hanukkah for some of us in Christmas for others. My present to you this holiday season is to keep this blog three and share some of my favorite anecdotes with you. I hope the result is a laugh, chuckle or at least a smile.

Alfred Hitchcock enjoyed food; and was not happy with the portions served at a private dinner. Toward the end of the evening when the host said, “I do hope you dine with us again soon,” Hitchcock assented, “By all means. Let's start now.”

Yogi Berra, famous for expertise in baseball and his confusion with English, was asked if he would like his pizza cut into four or eight pieces. You'll be replied, “Better make it four. I don't think I can eat eight.”

Enrico Caruso, famed Italian tenor, met Ernestine Schumann-Heink, German contralto, at a restaurant. Seeing her about to begin an enormous steak, he remarked, “Stina, surely you are not going to eat that alone?” An unashamed gourmand, Schumann-Heink replied, “No, no, not alone -- mit potatoes.”

Jimmy Carter was anxious to learn if he could eat the Southern type of meals he was used to when she moved into the White House. “Yes sir,” was the reassuring reply. “We’ve been fixing that kind of food for the servants for a long time.”

I love conundrums. What do you think of these?

If white wine goes with cooked fish, do white grapes go with sushi?

If instead of talking to your plants you yell at them, will they grow up to be troubled and insecure?

Where does a nudist put his keys after locking his car?

Do married people really live longer or does it just seemed that way?

And finally - if a cat's always lands on his feet and bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you buttered your bread and strapped it on the back of a cat?