This Guardian thread asks for witty responses Angela Eagle could have made to David Cameron saying 'Calm down dear, listen to the doctor'. You know, the kind of clever response to an insult that you only think of hours too late.

What would I have said? In reality something like: 'Calm down? I'll calm down when the PM agrees to (insert real political point here) and not before. And wipe that f---ing smirk off your face Osborne.'

Here are some suggestions (mostly not by me):

'If the PM thinks the NHS is improving under his administration, I can only say he should Go Compare.'

From the Big Lebowski '...calmer than you are.'

'Is that the best you've got?'

'I wonder whether Churchill would have admired the behaviour of the current Prime Minister? Oh, no, no, no.'

'Ooh, matron!'

'Listen to the doctor? Why don't you listen to the whole bloody BMA?'

'That's the nearest this Prime Minister will ever get to being a Winner.' (score!)

'If the current Prime Minister thinks we'll buy this he must think we'll buy any car... And wipe that f---ing smirk off your face Osborne.'