Wednesday, October 26, 2005

PRENUP

We know Katie Holmes is a sweet, naive girl from Ohio, but this latest story from the upcoming Star has her leaving naive and crossing the border into stupid.

The paper says Holmes was recently shocked when love-of-her-life Tom Cruise asked her to sign a prenup.

"She's freaked out," the Star source says. "I think she thought it meant that he wasn't sure their relationship would last."

"It certainly doesn't seem odd that Cruise would ask her to sign an agreement to protect his assets. After all, he's twice divorced, wise to the ways of the world and worth an estimated $300 million."

And since he doesn't want her to work while she's mothering his child... Let's a see, a 26-year-old pretty brunette in Hollywood... She's worth one-twelfth of a dime.

The source says that the idea of a prenup had never occurred to Ka-Ka-Ka-Katie.

"She is head over heels in love with him and couldn't bear the thought that he might not be equally as in love," the source said. But Tom didn't become the biggest star in Hollywood by not being fast on his feet.

He told Kiss-Me-Katie that the prenup was for "her protection."

And she bought that?

"He explained that at 43, he's more than 16 years older than she is," said the source, "and although he's healthy, who knows what life has in store?"

Worried that he might die young like his dad, Tom told Katie, "he wanted to create a prenup so that she will always be taken care of, no matter what."

Tattle's no divorce lawyer, but we're guessing she would be taken care of just fine if Tom made her and little TomKat the main beneficiaries in his will.

Shouldn't she be used to signing financial agreements with him by now. Odds are, there's something in the prenup where "if" they "break up," she's not allowed to talk about him and his vagina hating penis.

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Mission Statement: Our ultimate mission is to save Dakota Fanning from the clutches of Mr. Icky Cruise. To do this, we plan to display Mr. Icky Cruise's character, as we see it (aka our opinion, do not sue), for all who care to look, to see.