Mind War

If thoughts are your own then why are they always so hard to stop ? It makes no sense if its your head thinking them… can’t you just stop thinking!? So confusing. Some nights I fight for hours with my own head just to shut up, I’m fed up of laying there thinking I’m worthless and going nowhere. Sometimes the thoughts are so crushing that I feel I can’t breathe, like its taking over my body. Even If I try to think positive thoughts my head will throw in a bad memory and it all starts of again!

At this moment in time I feel like I have almost tried everything to combat these bad thoughts, going for walks or reading or talking to people. Nothing seems to work for me, maybe the medication my doctor will put me on will help, I just hope to hell it does.

These types of thought problems seem to go hand in hand with depression or anxiety if when you think about it your mind is the route to all these problems. What I wonder most is why other people who don’t have these problems control there thoughts and mind processes. I wish I had better understanding of my own mind I feel it would help me balance out my thoughts more.