Top Design: The Weekly Dish

Ready for the weekly dish about Top Design? Here?s Becky from Hatch with the latest… Take it away, Becky… – Holly

Well, just so you know how I sacrifice for y’all, I’m tuning into Top Design before I check out the premiere of the new version of Knight Rider! Just kidding (kind of – I LOVED Michael and K.I.T.T. when I was a kid; can’t you just see a modern-day David Hasselhoff rolling around on the floor of the the car all drunk eating a cheeseburger?). Anyway, I digress.

This week we saw the TD contestants design for three bachelors who had some pitifully sparse apartments. They were James, the 23 year old law student, Obi, the stylish producer, and Eddie, the conservative suit. I held back the gagging feeling in my throat when Obi said the words “zen” and “pop,” but he gave his team some good guidance about what he liked. There was a big budget and there were endless shopping excursions, as well as the complimentary services of wallpaper hangers, painters, a carpenter and a seamstress. It was another team challenge (bummer), but there was some excellent drama. Said drama centered around Shazia, to whom Nathan referred as “Bad Luck Mary” and “Needy von McNeedison” within the first few minutes of the challenge. He wasn’t far off. However, her behavior paled in comparison to the cattiest lady in town, Eddie.

A Pop Design Quiz happened this week! How hard is it to throw some flowers together in 20 minutes? That’s an eternity! However, Theresa and Preston managed to make it look really difficult!

Note to Ondine: Using The Cabinet of Natural Curiosities has been DONE TO DEATH. Someone papered a bathroom in it in Elle Decor (or was it H&G?) YEARS AGO! It’s in magazine spreads more often than the Tom Ford Gucci book. And yes, a 23 year old dude is not going to be impressed with it either. Perhaps you should have decoupaged pages from Maxim, or better yet, the Tom Ford Gucci book, instead.

Note to All: Look through some magazines and pay attention to window treatments. Yours were hideous. Blinds with those partially crinkled up fabric shades; two-tone drapes that made no sense. Nathan, Shazia, and Preston, the cornice boxes were the least of your problems. BTW, you should have had the wallpaper hanger put the coordinating grasscloth over them if you were so pressed for time. Oh, and while I’ve got you, painted horizontal stripes was a clever trick on Trading Spaces circa 2001.

Alright, enough from me – what did you think of this week’s episode? Do you think the right person was sent home? If not, who would you have sent and why? Did you like any of the final apartments, or did it look like a Rooms2Go showroom to you? Were there any design moves you found particularly clever? Do you think any of the teams found a good balance between the client’s needs and showing who they are as designers? Who had the worst bachelor pad you’ve ever seen? How would you have reacted to Eddie if he’d treated you the way he treated the designer who owned the showroom? Can you tell a fresh flower petal from a real one from across the room? Can you tell when you are smearing them across a table like it’s a newlywed suite bed? Do you think Shazia should have been an engineer or a doctor instead of a designer?

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27 Comments

I didn’t mind the phrase “panty dropping chic” the problem with the phrase involved the execution. It wasn’t chic or panty dropping. So if you are gonna slum it and use a “bachelor” phrase… then own it and step up to the plate.

My largest concern with every single one of the designers this season is that none of them are really designers. They are all decorators. And that’s being generous to a few of them.

No one is building anything, no one is crafting anything, I mean not everyone has to be Goil and make miniature replicas of every room and piece of furniture going into it, but no one is even creating a box so they can step outside of it. It feels like a bratty trading spaces than high end designer. This season is full of people who are “people” in the business… but what are they really showing for it? Even the furniture in the rooms was in the same location as it was when the bachelors had it arranged! That shouldn’t be too hard to switch up should it?

I didn’t mind Eddie’s throw down (all of that being said) as I am sure it was all edited together poorly and we weren’t able to get all of the reasons why he was upset.

the “panty dropping” really got on my nerves. i wouldn’t consider myself a feminist… but give us ladies some credit that just because a place is nicely decorated we are not going to drop our panties. it was sorta degrading. i think eddies definitely full of himself (or they are at least they’re editing him to appear so on the show). i wasn’t impressed with the results anyways. that room did not suit the client at all. i thought he was completely out of line arguing with the showroom owner. he was acting like a brat- and no matter how they edited it, those words came out of his mouth at some point- and he was out of line in my opinion. as someone who has worked in retail/sales it really annoys me when people treat those who work in retail poorly- although in this case he was a designer and the showroom owner. when he was saying “i work for the best” i wanted to yell who the hell cares- what does that have to do with the fact that if you break it you buy it???

and did i hear right when i heard that since he works for the best and is such a great designer he was doing the show for fun?? i may have heard wrong…

regarding your “Note to JA” “Note to Jonathan Adler: Please let the phrase ?bedscape? go.” >>>>>>>>>>> I don’t think your cease and desist will have any effect. I think JA would take one look at your blog and just go “oh…”

i mean it’s not like you are some great talent. You keep saying you are a trained architect. That doesn’t make you a designer. Even Frank Lloyd Wright was clueless about decorating and interior design or haven’t you taken the tour at his Arizona home? I think you give yourself way to much credit

SO glad Shazia is gone — she was just really annoying, and never showed much in the way of talent. Plus, box valances for the windows? Who still does that? Speaking of windows, I was shocked that two (I think) of the teams left up the vertical blinds in their bachelors’ apartments. Hideous!

I’m a bit disappointed that Andrea hasn’t lived up to her Queen Bitch potential. (I guess that title goes to Eddie, who is just way too full of himself and is beginning to get really obnoxious.) I was surprised that Andrea seemed to get along so well with Wisit — I was predicting some fireworks there, but they worked together quite nicely. Quel suprise!

They really HAVE to do individual challenges next week — I still have no sense of what a couple of them are even about as designers. And as much as I hated the PDC “white boxes” from last season, I don’t think it would hurt to do one challenge with them. With each designer given the exact same “blank slate,” we could finally see what each of them is bringing to the party. And it would give them a chance to, literally, “think outside the box” so we could see who actually designs the space and who just decorates it.

So agree with you on the panty dropping; I felt a bit nauceus; it is right in line with my hatred for the word crotch—it was so wrong and over over over said—clear :)

Erin, I agree, don’t think Kelly was there and well, I see so many people diggin her outfits and for me it feels like she is so out of scale and balance—garrish even, as if to play on every element — like the girl in school that everyone has decided is cool but really, is she ? Don’t get me wrong, I bow to her accomplishments in the design field and her work—nothing like her persona on the show.

The needy name was the best and Shazia drove me nuts—they really did need to blow her off on the cornice boxes circa 1998—she wrote her own ticket—I did feel like Preston handled himself well during the judging exchange and Jeff Lewis, he is just priceless—his facial expressions, his gift of design lingo, his expert presence—love him.

I have to say that I do not want to go through the rest of the season hearing India say, “We cannot live with your design, you’re going home” this aspect of these shows is really starting to bug me—each one trying to top the other with their kicking you off phrase—really?

And those screens, never. Oh yes, and the horizontal stripes, well, badly dated, yes, but the colors and the whole execution, a total contradiction to what the client said—he said conservative like 5 times going in.

Oh and lastly, the Eddie rant, he was so bad—screaming what the vases should cost—yes, probably expertly edited, but such a lil brat.

Hi Becky! Even though I don’t know you, I thought of you immediately last night when Jonathan & Margaret showed up for the Pop Design! :) I was glad to see it back, primarily because it seems like the only time we’re ever gonna see the designers do something by themselves!

On a positive note – I was really glad to see that the designers got help with this challenge so there could be a higher-quality result. However, I’m with Sarahrae – when is somebody gonna design something that “wows” in the room, instead of buying something to impress?!? Anyone can go into those amazing shops on La Brea and buy a cool piece of furniture. I do miss Goil and his building skills – the A-Frame beach bungalow, the swing & sandbox … But, I digress.

I just want to see their individual styles more so the judges can start judging on that, rather than this teamwork stuff (who-is-responsible-for-???).

And finally – I like how all the designers exclaimed this episode, “I miss Kerry!” FAN FAVORITE!!!

I have never seen this show, but here is my outsider’s perspective. I couldn’t help noticing that every single room from that link looked like pages from a Pottery Barn catalog with all that chunky dark wood and bland accessories. It all looked hopelessly generic and reflected no personality whatsoever. Maybe it’s just me, but these places look like they belong to a group of long-term OCD bachelors who iron their socks and would shriek and run for a tea towel if a drink spilled.

ERIN, I didn’t hear that part about Eddie doing it for fun, but WOW! if he did! Someone needed to shoot him with a tranquilizer dart, then send him off to Miss Manners Boot Camp. It usually takes A LOT to offend me, but everytime he said “panty dropping” he thought he was being really clever, edgy and cool, and I thought it was gross.

LINDA, I have no idea what’s going on with the non-functioning links, so sorry about that. Technological stuff is NOT my strong point!

SARAHRAE: Interesting point. I’m going to have to go back and look at the bios. I would think that magazine and set stylists would make great decorators, but apparently the jury is still out on that one! The results do feel like Trading Spaces or one of those staging shows. I keep blaming the time constraints, but perhaps it’s simply a lack of creativity. No one ever seems to have a “go big or go home”-sized idea.

I couldn’t say this above, but I thought Shazia deserved to go home. Weeks ago. Also, I think she has delusions of grandeur about inspiring masses of Pakistani-Americans to become decorators.

OH! Did anyone have a stand-out favorite in the Pop Design floral arranging? I liked Nathan’s and Ondine’s the best. I was already disliking Eddie at that point, but I do love lilacs, so if I had to pick one to take home with me, it would have been his. However, I would not have dropped my panties over them!

I used to be a fan of Eddie, as well, but that was painful to watch. Was it just me or was the editing on that seen a little goofy? I couldn’t quite tell where the trouble began? Did Eddie loudly exclaim that the vase couldn’t be worth more than 25 dollars? Rudeness!

And I agree about the painted stripes. Had to roll my eyes at that one.

Poor Shazia, she tried so hard to be heard only to whine her way to a “see you later, decorator” (oh wait, that was last year’s saying. I like it better than the “we cannot live with your design” statement which feels like it should be followed by the Law & Order gavel sound effect).

All in all, the rooms were pretty boring, even with the addition of bugs and butterflies (way to be creative, Ondine!–no, not really. Loved the guy saying they were going to be out on the balcony later). I do think they picked the clear winner. Had to laugh at Jeff Lewis’ remarks. Love him!

And I am a feminist, but “panty dropping chic” didn’t bother as much as his overconfident glee every time he used it. Ok, not that funny. Definitely not that funny the 50th time. Oh, Eddie. You need some kava kava, me thinks.

Shazia, Shazia, Shazia chiiiild uhm uhm uhmm nice to say bye bye. I do wonder though if they like Big Brother selecting token near certified whackadoos, (remember the one chick who you can only remember with the contorted face bawling all the time) anywho was Shazia picked for pure weakness in the first place. If so Bravo completely rude and not funny. Sorry for the soapbox guys, but this is a ploy that is so tired and gross that producers use and they can find better ways.

Margaret, Burrrr, someone start a fire please. Uhm Wow, wowee, hmm, ah well all righty. Her coldness is near death seriously. Her contribution is to be a cat eyed slinking snob? Really thats it? No profound word of design insightful wisdom, just i’m so better than this hateful stares and constant something smells facial expressions. Again GROSS.

See the effect of taking away the warmth of Kerry has caused?

Why does Widget speak? I love that he knew good and darn well Kerry sacrificed himself for him but he felt it was Shazia who needed to go.

Preston I love the ownership, even though like I said last week the same argument the judges use one week can be completely turned around or shut down the next week.

Thankfull for Todd Oldham he is a comfort to this snarky b*tch@$$ness (thank you Diddy) show. I remember having his purfume in the 90’s and really loving having a so called piece of him, cuase in all the articles they wrote about him in fashion mags he was extremely open and kind about his process.

So happy that Jeff Lewis left his… well you know, at the door. He gave great commentary which he is really good for without feeding his sick punishment fetish. I’ll call it having the right amount of leopard in a room. Perhaps he could replace Margie next season.

Becky as far as me feeling that Andrea, Ondine, and the marthadite guy having an in, I’m more referring to the regular world than the show. I could be really wrong about this, but from my cloudy vision here in OKC, I don’t understand why Andrea isn’t hooked up with InStyle or Domino with her husband being a working actor. It’s normal pr for her and him and the home or pool house or doll house speaks for itslef. Maybe theyv’e done this already. If she wanted to prove herself on her own merits than why is she on this show? And Ondine what the heck is wrong with her that she can’t be overun with design work with a name like that? Kidding but I do loooove her name, but how is Sex and the City Eet Designer not enough? This really seems like a step to the side or backwards. What if the genious red head costume designer from Sex decided her pie slice just wasnt big enough so she’s going to hope on over to Progect Runway to really make a go of her career? Then Martha prep school guy I think he had clearly burned the bridge to seafoam perfection, but I dont get his desire to compete here when he thinks he has done it all already? There are many more pros with obscurity that they could have chosen like someone who was the assistant to the set designer.

ANDY MATHIS – I am so with you on Nathan’s comments. I love them, and they are delivered so dryly.

ANDI-A – So many good points, I don’t know where to start, but I’d LOVE to see a celebrity Project Runway, especially one with Patricia Field on it. Let’s add Michael Kors and John Galliano and Alexander McQueen and Isaac Mizrahi. Oh it would be SO DELICIOUS!

ALISON, I am laughing at the Law and Order “DUN DUN” noise after India pronounces who is going home. My favorite send off line is Vivica A. Fox saying “Keep Reaching for the Stars, but you are not ready to dress them” on Glam God on VH-1!

TRACEY – I get your view on Jeff Lewis. He’s an acquired taste. You have to see all of his vulnerability and love of animals, etc. on Flipping Out in order for him to grow on you at all. I hated him at first and now I love him.

JENNA, you are right on with the PB comment. You said it better than my Trading Spaces/Rooms2Go references.

MICHELLE – Not sure where you got the idea that I think I am a great talent. If you read me regularly, you’d know I worship Jonathan Adler. Perhaps the tone of my voice gets lost in typing, but I write with my tongue in my cheek, and I’m just having a little fun here. I hope I don’t come across as “attacking” the show as you say in your blog. I think if you read more carefully you’d see that I enjoy the show very much, and I am simply critiquing everything from the temper tantrums to the final results. My formal training is as a DESIGNER and ARCHITECT in landscape architecture, which is mostly about understanding space and “scapes.” It was also a multi-disciplinary program where we also learned about architecture, urban planning, and preservation.

The term “bedscape” makes me roll my eyes at the thought of having to talk about the TOPOGRAPHY of a gosh-darn BED. This would lead to requiring USGS topo maps for said bed, mapping the hills and valleys created by pillows and the ubiquitous Hermes blanket. Understanding space isn’t really about “square footage,” though good DESIGNERS (vs. those who just add some frills and know nothing about architecture) do need to understand a blueprint and spatial planning.

Obviously, in a discussion it’s REALLY BORING if everyone just agrees with me, so I’m happy to see different views. I just want to make clear where I’m coming from and that I say what I say with humor, not because I think so highly of myself to think that Jonathan Adler is reading my post. I certainly don’t think of the above post as a “rant,” though maybe I’m wrong. That was not its intent. Thanks for commenting though, and thanks for the links – we could use some new traffic over at Hatch.

I agree with Sarahrae. These guys are decorators, not designers, and this is turning into a high-end Trading Spaces. But, at least with Trading Spaces, the mediocre design is a function of the format and the participants, and everyone’s (by and large) participating cheerfully. Here, at least in concept, we’re supposed to seeing high-end, sophisticated design, and it’s not happening. Perhaps worse, it’s not terribly edifying either: do any of you guys come away from the show feeling agitated by the judging, the format, the frantic pace, and the back-biting?

I was really expecting so much more from last night’s episode and all the rooms were soooooo boring. The only one I liked was the producer’s bedroom. But the panty-dropping pad? Common’ there will be NONE of that with that desing……(and that phrase of course!). If I walked into this guys apartment and saw some weird sea creatures glued on screens, then grandma’s wood console in the hallway and the so un-guy like-chandelier in the bedroom I would say “hey, lets go to my place instead”! On the other notes – Shazia was the right choice to go home, Eddie had the best flowers but over the top bratty attitude (please, no more name-dropping. We all know where you guys work) and I liked Preston’s overall proffesional composure. He is there to design not to b…..ch. He might be the one to watch when and if the indvidual challenges come. Oh yes, I missed Kelly last night – she is my breath of fresh air :)

Hi Adam, I think my comment and yours came in for approval at the same time. You’re right on about the difference between decorators and designers. I expect decorators on Top Design, while I expect highly HGTV-trained decorators on Design Star. I am very agitated by the time constraints and the group projects over individual projects. I expect this is more of a television production decision, which is working, as the drama is at a real high.

I’ll be honest, the only reason this show is still on my Tivo season pass is so I can discuss here afterwards. I missed the first season, but figured with the caliber of judges this season we’d get a pretty good competition.

I didn’t see what JA was talking about when he started gushing about Andrea, Teresa and Wisit’s bedroom. On TV it almost looked empty?

Natalie, Eddie & Ondine’s room looked nice for a married couple. But c’mon, what (straight) bachelor puts a chandelier in his bedroom? I was also kind of repulsed by the screens, mainly because I hate snakes. Nothing about that would make me want to remove my undergarments.

Oh, and did anyone catch Eddie’s comment about how his hands looked like a “Polish potato farmer…during, like the famine”?

– I’m actually really cross that Shazia was kept in ahead of Kerry last week. But at least she’s not doing anything potentially fatal like being a doctor or an engineer. Can you imagine?

– Martha should fire Eddie immediately for that utterly disgraceful performance in the furniture shop and for bandying her name and that of her organisation around in that way. I also don’t think he has a single original design idea in his head.

– Nathan’s flower arrangement was the only one I’d have given house room to. I like Nathan.

– This really should be called ‘Shop Design’. All these guys have done so far is shop, badly.

– Agree totally with the Pottery Barn comment. Everything was bland, bland, bland. Again. And brown, brown, brown. Again. Surely bachelors deserve a tiny bit of colour? Why didn’t someone steal those funky red couches the designers were lounging on after the judging? Why don’t they ever use any vaguely modern furniture?

– I really hated the sneering, snarky attitude a lot of the designers had towards their clients. So they like big TVs. Deal with it!

– I’m giving this programme one last chance next week, but so far it proves that you can bust the budget on great challenges, but if you haven’t got talented/likeable contestants or personable judges (I only really like JA out of this bunch) then good TV it ain’t.

Pxx

– Can I add Vivienne Westwood (in her youth) to ‘Celebrity Project Runway’? Which has to be the best TV programme idea EVER. TV producers – make it work!

Luka, Kelly, and Paola, I’m dying to know what Martha would do if she was listening to Eddie. And yeah, what was up with that potato Polish farmer famine comment? Really stupid.

Paola, we are definitely adding Vivienne Westwood to the list. Maybe we should throw in a celebrity-turned-fashion-designer, like Gwen Stefani or the Olsen Twins, just for the heck of it. We’ll need a prep/socialite type designer, like Kate Spade, Tori Burch, or Ralph Lauren. We’ll round it out with Oliver Theyskens, Nicholas Ghesquiere or perhaps Narciso Rodriguez! how much fun would that show be to watch! I love it!

-I was really disappointed in the designs this week. I am an aspiring designer and I am confident that even I could have done a better job for the bachelors. I feel like the rooms were really dated and SO busy. In each of the poor bachelors’ apartments there was SO MUCH going on.

-My least favorite room was the room Shazia worked on. It was not unique in any way and looked like something my grandpa would do with his house. The patterns were so bland. I also got tired of the fighting. Is it necessary to be so catty? It was ridiculous.

-Did none of these designers realize who they were designing for? Bachelors… Young college aged men. The rooms were old and bland. I don’t think it would have killed any of the designers to make a bold statement. I was really upset with the end results of the rooms. I thought they were pretty tacky and uneventful. I hope next week is better :[

Hey Paola, I just read in the NYTimes today that the move to Lifetime for Project Runway has been blocked by an injunction! Apparently Lifetime was planning to do spinoffs of the show – we could have made celeb PR happen! I doubt any of the good designers have any spare time, but how about celebrities with their own clothing lines, like Jessica Simpson? I saw a hideous Moulin Rouge-inspired shoe she supposedly designed in a magazine recently. It could be hilarious to see those people do the challenges.

Malori, I was disappointed too. The one thing I did like were the preppy touches the winning room added, like the argyle pillows on the sofa, and the plaids and checks on the bed.

Someone mentioned Goil – good point! I had forgotten how innovative he was. I haven’t seen a single big creative, and I hate to this phrase, but “out of the box” idea ala Goil this year. Even that surfer dude from Design Star last season (Todd?) at least tried to make big moves, like the skate ramp thing and that dumb rotating living room at Wayne Newton’s house. I thought Eddie’s team used the carpenter at their disposal the best, having him build a faux fireplace. I was surprised no one else went for a large architectural change. They had the manpower to carry out a big idea.

I don’t think any of the apartments were good. When I saw the final design for James, I thought it was ridiculous and girly. I laughed really hard when he said those room dividers were probably going to be thrown off the balcony.

I thought more than one designer should have gone home again.

I too was appalled by Eddie’s behavior. I wonder what Martha thought about that when she heard he was throwing tantrums and dropping her name. I’d be a little disappointed if I were her. Demotion to you Eddie! Okay… is it just me or does anything else think that all of Eddie’s designs look like something out of the Martha magazine. Perhaps Eddie has been working for Martha too long and needs to move on.

I was surprised too that no other teams had architectural elements created by their carpenters. I was surprised seamstresses were part of their crew because all of the window treatments were bad.

The one thing that really surprised me is that not one single team brought in anything personal into their designs. I know they are bachelors and didn’t have much. Did they have so little time with them to really ask them personal questions?

About

I’m Holly Becker, and I work as a journalist, author and interior stylist with a 4th book soon to release this September. On decor8, I share decorating ideas, trends and beautiful objects and places - those extra special finds, often made by hand, things that tell a story. I'm lucky enough to travel frequently so I record my many adventures here, too. Together with my small team, we present daily content to enlighten and inspire. Welcome and happy decor8ing!

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