While the rest of the country is focused our Republican "saviors" who can't name a specific spending cut they endorse and that useless Keith Olbermann, we're going to stay focused on the issues that affect your life. Or in this case, your death.

Don’t Call The Police!

61-year old Robert Neill Jr. called the police at 4am to complain that his neighbors were harassing him. When the cops arrived, they claim he was being "aggressive," so they tased and maced him. Robert Neill Jr. was pronounced dead at the hospital.

Dutifully reciting the version offered by Mr. Neill’s killers, Fox affiliate WPMT reports: “As the police tried to investigate the harassment claims Neil became very aggressive and combative. Neill continued to struggle with the officers after several attempts to calm him down and the officers used a taser on him which did calm him down.”

After officers from the Mount Joy Borough Police Department had tranquilized Neill through a mild dose of electro-shock torture, officers from two other agencies — the Susquehanna Regional Police Department and the Pennsylvania State Police — arrived on the scene to “assist” the assailants. Thus fortified in their confrontation with the “aggressive,” “combative” man, the heroes once again deployed the taser against Neill. This succeeded in “subduing” the frantic man, who was collected by EMTs and died en route to the hospital.

Lancaster County District Attorney Craig Stedman informed the local press that the county medical examiner will perform an autopsy on Neill, which will inevitably find that something other than the repeated taser assaults — perhaps coronary artery disease, a drug overdose, or “excited delirium” – was the chief cause of the 61-year-old’s death. It’s not that the police killed him, you see: He just happened to die while being electrocuted by the scrum of armed tax-feeders who were, after all, only there to help.