Tuesday, July 28, 2009

One Parade Route That Was Never In Doubt

"Many of you have blind faith in your invisible sky fairy, which science proves does not exist, so why can you not have faith in Obama (who is real) and all the things that smart people believe in? And did Jesus ever promise you free health care? Sure, some claim that Jesus healed a few people, but Obama is going to heal everyone with his free health care. And he also promises the new health care programs will somehow lower debt and create jobs. As any smart person using logic will tell you, that’s way more miraculous than anything Jesus did. So why not give Obama your unquestioning devotion?

You don’t need to understand how increased spending will help a country in debt or how increased taxes on energy will help a failing economy, you only need to know that Obama is much, much smarter than you. So obviously his solutions will work much better than anything you troglodytes would think he should do. If you could just have blind faith in Obama’s brilliance, you wouldn’t have to worry anymore.

To help you with that, Obama has started having 'Look How Smart I Am' parades through various cities so everyone can see how smart he is. If you are smart, then Obama should appear very smart to you. It seems like a good idea, but the last one was marred when some kid yelled out, 'The emperor has no brain!' and started laughing at the bucket stuck on Obama’s head. As I’ve explained before, Obama isn’t an emperor — yet — and the reason he had a bucket stuck on his head is that he was quite curious whether his head could fit inside it. Smart people get curious about many different things. If you were smart, you’d recognize that a bucket stuck on his head is in fact a symbol of his genius. And you’d stop laughing at him.

Why do I even try to explain these things to you idiots! How about this: If Obama is as dumb and inexperienced as you think he is, then how did he get elected president? Ha! Explain that one, dummy!"

-- Frank J. Fleming, who "has many diplomas and certifications specifying how very very smart he is" - but they don't mean nothing! - especially with him doing commentary on Pajamas Media.

Comments

"The Crack Emcee is the Truth-teller and the Trickster, he is the Jokerman: he is the Black Conservative who has found his own ‘Slow Train Coming.’ To repurpose a bit of Dylan history: the commenters are yelling at him ‘Judas’ and his reply is ‘I don’t believe you.’"

"In a different time and place, Crack and I knew each other pretty well and his work inspired me. Though more political and sociological, he covers a similar ground from a non-believers perspective, but is unabashedly conservative politically. Check it out, but it's deep dark water; the feints may be indistinguishable from the sincere and it's not for the faint-of-heart."

"Raising his Pimp Hand to the Lunatic Fringe. Yeah, I list him three times. You need to read his blog. Danger: You might not get it at first but I assure you that when you do, you will slap yourself in the head like the idiot you once were. Read it. Love it. Learn it. And that pile of smelly goo at yer’ feet? That’s just the entrails of your stinking idols baking in the hot sand of the Crack Emcee’s arena."

"He imbues his words with so much bite, wit and shading that a lyric sheet doesn't begin to suggest the depth of what he's conveying. What he does is articulate soul-knowledge, those truths we hide from or can't find the words for. You listen to it with mouth agape, not because it's radical in content but because it's raw and honest, unconcerned with the truth-gagging politics of celebrity -- which perhaps makes it radical after all. If Paul Mooney and Nina Simone had a baby, then ignored it, leaving it to raise itself up by its own brilliant and righteously embittered genes, the Crack Emcee would be the result."

"I have been mulling over for awhile now how I might act as a ‘force for good’ in this world. I am particularly interested in the danger associated with cults and indoctrination at all levels of the human experience. How might I help combat this? The Crack Emcee does it,...in addition to blogging on his many other interests, and he has been a big inspiration."

"Day after day, post after post, he gives incredible insight into issues we're all pursuing, but he's got this funky, incredible, hilarious, SPOT-ON take on things. He is a one-man Time Magazine, the way it SHOULD be.

"I just came across The Macho Response. A lovely blog,...that describes the writer's journey from Democrat to Republican. There are lots of pretty pictures illustrating his story. What he looks at with a particularly bright eye is the occultism that is at the core of the Democrat world view today."

"A politically-incorrect blog out in the Bay Area…There is an occasional picture that is not quite appropriate to an office environment, although I’m not sure this by itself justifies a 'NSFW' warning…language isn’t fit for family viewing. The ideas are definitely dangerous. Unsuitable opinions. Terrible taste. Pictures of strange ugly creatures. Yup, we’re cousins, alright,...I’m certainly gonna read this 'Macho Response' guy."

As a former homeopathic 'doctor', I commend you for your bravery and brilliance.

Your blog is like an antidote to the 'New' Age too-cool-for-school-aid that America's been drinking like it's going out style...which, with the help of brilliant minds like you, hopefully it is. The sooner the better, for all our sakes.

I can't thank you enough for saving me from the eau de toilet/oprahahaha cesspool..."