The Top 10 Ways to Ditch the Bad Guys

by SpikeApril 30, 2012 at 10:00AM
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Views: 33,336

In celebration of World's Wildest Police Videos premiering at 8/7c and Undercover Stings at 9/8c on May 7, here's The Top 10 Ways to Ditch the Bad Guys. We've all been there. The day has unfolded in completely unforeseen ways and now you're being hunted down like a stray dog, and the odds are hopelessly against you. Now you're left with two equally difficult choices: turn and face the enemy, ensuring certain oblivion, or run. Run fast, run hard, in hopes of living another day unshackled by the tyranny of those who seek to destroy your way of life. The choice is all too easy, so you jump in the steel-clad beast of your choice and bury the throttle.

Yeah, it's a bit dodgy, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Hopefully you're driving a lowered car, because otherwise things could get a bit messy. Definitely for highway use only, as you're going to have to match the speed of the semi truck very closely to avoid having your ride bear a sudden resemblance to a crushed beer can. Nonetheless, when used properly, it can really turn the tables for you.

A high speed chase on busy surface streets can be daunting proposition, but if you play your cards right, you can make this work in your favor. Since you're the one with nothing to lose, showcase your brass balls by driving like you don't care if you live or die. Thread the needle, drive on the wrong side of the road, and most importantly, create obstacles. The bad guys probably have less invested in the situation than you do, so they won't be as likely to launch into oncoming traffic at 70 MPH or throw their car sideways into a busy intersection. And since you're the first one through the gauntlet, you'll probably leave such a trail of carnage and debris that they'll have to slowly negotiate while your awesome-meter is going off the charts down the road.

8. Drive Where They Won't

Can't lose them in the endless stretches of New Mexico highway? Pull a move à la Vanishing Point and drive straight into the desert. Nobody wants to get stranded in the vast expanses of the desert, but again, you've got nothing to lose, so hopefully you'll come across a crazy guy who sells snakes to cults. Happens every day.

When you have a holier-than-thou goal, the impossible can become reality. Jake and Elwood realized this early on, and used this special circumstance to great effect, as dozens upon dozens of Illinois' finest fell by the wayside during their epic journey to save their only home from certain destruction.

Otherwise unattainable feats like backflips, drawbridge launches, spontaneously doomed Nazis, and driving at triple digit speeds with a thrown rod are possible when you have a purpose greater than saving your own ass.

6. Deploy the Turbo Boost!

Now I haven't experienced this one first hand, but the Hoff's Trans Am has a Turbo Boost button that deploys a launch ramp directly in front of it, which appears to work out great and seems really convenient. So, if you've got one of these buttons, I suggest you just keep pressing it constantly until the bad guys aren't in your rear view mirror anymore.