I was a bit surprised the other day to read that cat DNA has been used to trap a murderer for the first time ever. This is bad news for feline loving murderers but good news for the rest of us, I suppose. Anyway, this got me wondering about other new uses we could find for our whiskered friends. There must be something those lumps of fur are useful for.

I know that there are probably already cat spas and salons in cool places like California and Doncaster but I was thinking that now might be the time to get a spa which is entirely staffed by cats. I am not entirely sure how this would work but it has got to be worth a try, to see if they can pamper us for a change.

Could cats not help us when we go fishing? After all, they are apparently big fans of fish. I have never actually seen one eat a fish but, then again, I have never seen anyone slip on a banana skin either and I believe that it is an entirely common occurence. All in all, I reckon that it probably makes sense to takes a feline away with your fly fishing supplies and see whether he helps you at all.

Instead of using electric lawnmowers (like normal people) or old fashioned roller mowers (like me) wouldn’t it be nice if we could get our cats to just chew on the grass? I mean, cows can do this and so can sheep and goats, so why can’t felines? I reckon they are just being lazy by avoiding eating grass.

I also think that cats could be used to offer chaffeur services. Wouldn’t it be great if you walked out of your office at the end of a long day and the cat was sitting behind the steering wheel waiting to take you home? They would probably make great drivers due to their excellent reflexes, although I am not sure I would trust one to take me home without stopping off to fight with a few of his enemies or chase a few birds.

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