Your owl comment reminded me of a character that has appeared in a couple of Terry Pratchett’s books: the Duck man. He has a live duck on his head at all times, but doesn’t know it. So comments/questions about the duck are responded to with “What duck?”

“… never be seen without an owl on my shoulder and never answer questions about it.”
You don’t see that many tame owls. Might be hard to come by. Would it be one of those owls you have to inflate periodically, like Inspector Clouseau did with his parrot?

“So what percentage of gun deaths are children firing fully automatic weapons?”

That’s the stupid thing. Previously, some young child killed himself when firing an automatic weapon that went wild on him. (I looked it up: WESTFIELD, Mass. — An 8-year-old boy died after accidentally shooting himself in the head while firing an Uzi submachine gun under adult supervision at a gun fair.)

And yet all this time later, some other idiot lets a small girl fire an automatic weapon?

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And He did despair, for in His omniscience, He did know that His creations had but three-fifths of the splendor of that which would be IMAO."
-No One of Consequence

"A blogger with a sense of humor."
-Some Woman on MSNBC

"It was something of great contentment getting to your site this morning."
-A Spam Comment