Their fine if short-lived bromance blossomed in the calm before the media storm—that is, just hours before Harry absconded to the not-so-private quarters of his hotel room for a game of strip billiards—so naturally, the laid-back dude is the man to go to for some firsthand accounting of how the night went down.

Fortunately, just such an occasion for spilling all presented itself this morning, when Lochte dropped by his home away from home, the Today show. Lochte started off explaining that he had never met the prince before that now-infamous night.

"We were at the same pool party, and his people came over to my table and said, 'Hey, Prince Harry wants to meet you.'"

Seeing as how that's an offer no one could refuse (and judging by the photographic evidence of that night, that apparently includes secret camera-wielders and clothes-averse party girls), Lochte sauntered over to where Harry was. While, of course, making one important distinction during his color commentary of the night.

"I was fully clothed, so was he," he laughed. Well, for a bit, anyway.

"He was like, 'You want to race me in the pool?' I was like, 'All right, let's go.'"

And hey, while he may be catching heat from Queen Elizabeth II as we speak, it's not just Lady Gaga who's in the royal's corner, as he apparently walked away from the encounter with the Lochte seal of approval.

"You know how he's a part of the royal family and everything, but he's really a nice guy," the five-time London medalist said. "He's really talkative and he really wanted to meet me and honestly wanted to race me. I thought that was the coolest thing."

And for a time, the most headline-grabbing aspect of Harry's trip. At least, until the naked other kind of pool play. So, where was Lochte during the sexy shenanigans? Was he asked to keep the party going by his fleeting BFF?

"No, no, he never said anything like that," Lochte explained to Matt Lauer, quickly clarifying that he was never asked to join Harry later in the night. "Oh, no...after our race we went our separate ways."

And Lochte could practically pinch himself for having the good fortune of avoiding that kind of press.

"Kinda happy," he said of his non-invite. "I don't need that."

No one does. Though Harry would no doubt have welcomed sharing the heat on this one.