Too insipidly, cloyingly cutesy to be edgy, too crass, juvenile and vulgar to be cute, and not funny enough to be either.

Additionally, there is not one single iota of genuine wit, emotion, or originality in even one frame of this odious film.

When I worked as a teacher only a few years ago, lecturing a class of 30-odd teenagers, my voice was strong and resonant — clear as a bell, in fact. It’s my voice that is crying out for an anti-ageing treatment. John Rubin, a consultant at the Royal National Throat, Nose and Ear Hospital in London, says: ‘Older voices sound breathy and slightly harsh.

Frances Parkes, a vocal expert who runs the clinic Max Your Voice in Harley Street, says she’s seeing increasing numbers of women who feel their voice is letting them down when they hit their 40s.That’s because they know how to look after their voices.’ ‘When we breathe shallowly, our voices sound breathy and weak,’ says Frances. Letting the air into the diaphragm rather than keeping it in the upper chest makes your voice sounds resonant and strong. Her breath control — long, deep breaths, not gasps or shallow breaths — is fantastic.’Diet plays an important part in how we sound.Spicy or acidic foods can damage our voices because as the stomach attempts to digest them, unpleasant gases are produced that travel over the trachea and vocal folds, irritating them. Luckily enough, carrying a bit of weight benefits our voices because fat cells provide a good source of oestrogen.This hormone is essential for lubricating our vocal cords, keeping our voices rich and young.‘It’s far better for your voice to keep a few extra pounds on board,’ says John Rubin.