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Monday, February 20, 2017

The Great Wall

Review by Bob Ignizio

Critically acclaimed Chinese filmmaker Zhang Yimou delivers
a fantasy epic in which color-coded warriors and a grungy looking Matt Damon do
battle with hordes of CGI monsters in the most expensive film ever shot
entirely in China, THE GREAT WALL.

Mercenary William Garin (Damon) and his Spanish friend Pero
(Perdo Pascal) are all that's left of a band of warriors hoping to get their
hands on some of China's rumored super weapon, a mysterious black powder (gun
powder, natch). Instead they stumble into a centuries-old battle between
Chinese soldiers manning the Great Wall of China and some vaguely defined space
monster dragon things that can only be killed by shooting them in the eye. And
for some reason magnets make them zonk out. How does that work? I don't know,
ask Insane Clown Posse.

Garin gets a love interest/battle buddy in the form of
bungee-diving spear maiden Commander Lin Mae (Jing Tian). She provides the
warrior for hire with a reason to fight beyond personal gain. On the other
hand, shifty westerner Sir Ballard (Willem Dafoe) offers temptation, promising
all the black powder they can carry and an escape from what seems like a
hopeless battle. Will the roughhewn scoundrel take the easy way out, or will he
redeem himself? What do you think?

We're a long way from JU
DO and RAISE THE RED LANTERN
here, folks. Of course, this isn't the first time Zhang Yimou has dabbled in
commercial genre material. Since 2002's HERO,
Yimou has alternated between more serious dramas and crowd pleasing martial
arts adventures. The difference is, Yimou's previous martial arts films still
had a sheen of respectability about them. THE
GREAT WALL, on the other hand, is full-on, unapologetic cheese.

There are still some of Yimou's signature touches, notably
his rich, vibrant primary color palette. But honestly, hiring someone of
Yimou's caliber to direct and spending around $150 million to make such
nonsense seems kind of ridiculous. Paul W. S. Anderson or the UNDERWORLD production team could have
cranked this out for about a third of that sum, and the quality would not have
suffered noticeably.

Max Brooks, author of the book 'World War Z', came up with
the story in collaboration with producer Thomas Tull. Another 5 writers are
credited on this thing, which is kind of mind boggling given considering how by
the numbers the final product is. It's dumber than a bag of hammers, but if you
like cheesy monster movies, it will probably do the trick for you. And with
Yimou at the helm and a solid cast, it has better production values and acting
than it deserves. 2 ½ out of 4 stars.