We’ve laid into the Vienna resident plenty of times, and, considering we share an optometrist (shout-out to Dr. Snively!), I don’t feel good about it, but here are but a few of his pearls of wisdom heard before shutting it off with Maryland down 40-15 at halftime:

Greivis Vasquez “is having a MAGNIFICENT year.” He entered the game shooting 31% and averaging 3.5 turnovers per game in ACC play.

This was Brian Zoubek’s “BREAKOUT game”. Zoubek is a stiff and was being guarded by a guy who comes up to his chest.

Gerald Henderson “is the STAR of this Duke team.” Kyle Singler would like to have a word.

Every shot Greg Paulus hits is “ENORMOUS”. Greg Paulus is an enormous pile of shit.

And so forth. I don’t have the heart to get into it, aside from noting that Mr. “[Cameron] Is My House” shot 2-10 with as many turnovers as points (four).

This was a game Maryland was supposed to lose; they just got embarrassed while doing so. It’s their fourth loss in six games, with the two wins being narrow home victories over ACC bottom-dwellers Georgia Tech and UVA. They return to College Park to play BC and Miami this week, and it’ll be interesting to see how they respond. Hopes couldn’t be any lower.

I agree that Paulus is an annoying sissy and Zoubek for the most part has been a bust. But Maryland is a disgrace. They had scored a whopping 29 points with 8 minutes left. When you lose that bad your punishment for being a Maryland fan is to have to listen to Mike Patrick or Dick Vitale.