Sorry it took me so long, but I made a transcript of a tv appearance by Brian last March 23rd, where he had Freddie's ghost chanelled to comment on the Queen + Paul Rodgers thing. Since this is a little unusual, I thought I'd share it with you.

=====================

Hostess: “Hello, and welcome to another episode of – Ardent Spirits, the Perfect Thing for a Saturday Night. Our guest this night is none other than Mr. Brian Harold May. Mr. May is known for being a queen…”

Brian: “IN Queen”

Hostess: “What?”

Brian: “I was IN Queen”

Hostess (slightly disappointed): “Oh, I see,” she gets her act together again. “Mr. May will be speaking tonight, on the air with you, to his Bandmate from Beyond the grave, Fr…”

Brian: “Urn, actually.”

Hostess: “Urn?”

Brian: “Well, you see, Freddie was cremated and so he isn’t really technically buried as opposed to, well, you know…incinerated”

Hostess: “Oh, right Mr. May. So, without any further delay, ladies and gentlemen, here is the Spirit of Freddie Mercury.”

* Poof * (This is, of course, by no means an allusion to Freddie’s sexuality.)

Freddie: “Because I went to look at him in the shower the other day, darling. Scared the shit out of me. Except of course I do not have shit anymore.”

Brian: “Do you miss it?”

Freddie: “Shit? No.”

Brian: “No, life I mean.”

Freddie: “Part of it, I guess…Russian Caviar, one of the great pleasures in life.”

Brian: “You miss that?”

Freddie (wistfully): “Yes…somehow you can only get the Turkish kind here…”

Brian: “So, Freddie, is there anything else you want to let us know?”

Freddie: “Why should I care that you don’t know everything? Serves you right for being alive.”

Hostess: “You seem to be a little upset, Freddie. Would you like to share with us why?”

Freddie: “Well, to be quite honest, I’m a bit annoyed with the new president of the United States.”

Hostess: “Oh? You are one of the few who isn’t satisfied with the recently inaugurated president.”

Freddie: “Oh, it’s not that, it’s just that hell froze over when he was elected, and ever since then our central heating has been out of order. Have you ever tried a cold shower? I tell you, it was a novel and highly disagreeable experience to me.”

Hostess: “I’m sorry Freddie, our time’s up for tonight. Join us next week, March 30, for another episode of Ardent Spirits, featuring none other than Maurice Jarre.