The Token Oldster

I was talking a few months back to someone who's a few yrs. older than I (so she's in her early 70s) & she told me that she had noticed more & more the last coupla yrs. that any group or club she joins, she's usually older than the other members by more than a few yrs. & finds herself being treated as the "token cute little old person." By that she meant that as long as you're being "cute" (e.g., not making waves, in other words, polite suggestions or even asking questions about group plans, procedures, etc.), you'll be tolerated; but step out of cute/agreeable-to-everything mode and you'll be even more invisible than you were before. (And I saw this exact thing happen to her in the group we were in together for a short time; she made a polite, nicely-presented suggestion & the group leader--who was about 10 yrs younger--literally turned her back on her & went right on with her "this is what we're going to do in this group" spiel & then was cold as ice to her from then on.)

So now I'm noticing this happening to me too. I don't know if it's just started or I'm only just now noticing because she brought it to my attention. And it might be because we're both female--I really don't think older men go through this as much as women do but I could be wrong--and it could also be that we're in a rural, conservative area & the few groups in this area that would appeal to both of us are full of younger people; most of the people around here in our age group spend most of their time at church, knitting, or babysitting grandkids, none of which apply to me (nor her, I think). So that could have something to do with it too.

Has anybody else noticed this happening to you? Especially if you're male, since as I said above, doesn't seem to happen to men as much but I could be wrong.