Thai Bar Girls – Looking Through Your Eyes

A recent post on Behind The Noodle Curtain, titled Canadian boys need to toughen up, highlights the danger signals to watch for when it comes to Thai bar girls on the lookout for soft touch tourists, and ex pats who so easily fall in love . Rick’s excellent post, also tells the tale of two of his fellow Canadian nationals who fell victim to the honey traps often laid by Thai bar girls. One lost a lot of money, the other his life, a victim of murder when shot dead by a hit man.

Rick’s post is a must read for anyone new to Thailand, or those about to visit for their first time. In fact Rick’s post is also a reminder to all of us that going into a cross cultural relationship, without a grasp of your partner’s language, really does leave you open to the idiom of love being blind.

A list of life’s untrustworthy ‘professions’, would see Thai bar girls vying with metropolitan taxi drivers for a place very near the top. A read through many Thai blogs and forums reveals horror stories of bar girls skimming, scamming and ripping off customers, boyfriends, and their other halves… but does one bad apple spoil the whole bar girl bunch?

The post on Behind The Noodle Curtain is educational and thought-provoking but is there only one side to Thailand’s sex industry coin. In trying to squeeze all the pips from the sour tasting apple, Beyond The Mango Juice puts on its little black micro mini, ankle boots, spaghetti strap top, and after drowning and downing some M-150 (Red Bull) and yaba daba doo ( methamphetamine), takes a look at the western male through the eyes of a Thai bar girl.

The photographs used in this post are for illustration purposes only and Beyond The Mango Juice in no way implies any of the women pictured are involved in the sex industry.

When Caucasians land in the City of Angels they head off to the likes of Pattaya and think they own it. We are talking about those who believe they can walk on water and avoid drinking it, the western tourist and ex pat.

Any young Thai girl heading for Pattaya and Bangkok’s sex tourist spots for the first time, would do well to be advised by one of the industry’s more experienced hands on the kind of customers she will certainly meet. But what should the young protégée be wary and warned of.

Pattaya is the worlds sex capital, and anyone who has been there will know temptation is only one bar away, and inside them is a human menagerie which spans to every society of life. Here’s a few characters you are always going to find in Pattaya, and my guess at how Thai bar girls might view them.

Typical Pattaya Bar Punters

Johnny Cash – Johnny’s been hanging around for a couple of months now, and he’s always got money, but where’s it coming from. If he’s splashing big cash in the bars and living life like there’s no tomorrow, he’s either a rich man, or a plastic freak whose wallet is full of money and ATM cards. If he’s drinking around the girl bars of Pattaya, and not staying at the more exclusive Thai resorts, there’s every chance he’s surviving on credit cards. People with real big money in Pattaya often settle for the quiet life. Take him for what you can, but don’t give him your heart.

Johnny Nightlife – Johnny visits Pattaya twice every year for three weeks at a time, and is out every night, but never during the day. He’s bedded many bar girls, but only at hand-picked hotels, and his ‘dates’ apartment. Johnny’s probably a married man and spends the daytime with his overweight western wife. Go with Johnny and clean him for all you can.

Johnny No Johnnie – When it comes to safe sex Johnny’s as unprotected as they come. Johnny doesn’t care about HIV, or even himself, so he won’t care about you. When Johnny’s in the bar the only bell ringing should be one worn around his neck. Johnny No Johnnie has been banned from all the single clubs andonline dating sites in his home town, now he’s turned his loins to Pattaya. Avoid.

Fat Johnny – The only time Johnny gets off his bar stool is when his bladder is full, or to jump on the back of his rented motorbike to take one of the girls back to his room. Johnny didn’t get overweight by being energetic, so every time he wants a takeaway, a pack of cheap cigarettes, or a beer from the fridge, you’ll be ordered to get it. Nearly forgot, as you would expect, girls on top. Johnny’s harmless but hard work.

Johnny Rotten – He personifies all the qualities the Thai’s dislike. Johnny’s loud, rude and disrespectful. He’ll think nothing of swapping girls from the same bar night after night. You’re going nowhere with this one so try to shun any advances. Either that, or hike up your price.

The tourist spot revellers and their antics highlighted above, can barely be described as ‘criminal’, but they do quickly convince new Thai bar girls that money and self-respect are not always partners in bed. A new bar girl from a poor rural village, who witnesses at first hand the drunken capers of most falang, soon realises her customers have less common sense than her parent’s buffaloes. Sadly for some, it’s a money-making opportunity too good to miss.

A number of the bar girls who find ‘love’ with holidaying tourists will be sent packing back to their towns and villages with a bundle of cash, and a promise of more to come. For many the monthly handouts dry up as the falang realizes work, and an alcohol free life, are paying for buffaloes and a motorbike he can’t afford to travel and see. When the pay cheques stop, the girl heads back to the beach resort with a changed and hardened outlook towards the western man.

A soi (street) wise Pattaya bar girl will view most tourists and ex pats as honest, good-hearted people, who are easy prey to a good-looking girl with a sparkling smile. Regrettably, the Johnny’s among those westerners, have soured and disillusioned the minds of so many Thai bar girls over the years that a bite of the forbidden fruit, often leaves many western men with a bitter taste. Pattaya’s apple has been churned into cider and gout, but don’t always blame the bar girl.

Martyn , you did leave out one Johnny and that is one that if the truth be told many a Bar girl has found him and now they and Johnny they are in America or the UK and many still living up north in Thailand, and living happily ever after( along with their families) and thats JOHNNY ANGEL (remember the 50’s song). Great read and a must read for the newbies and short timers , But life in Pattaya would be pretty dull without all the Johnnys and a lot of Thai folks would be planting rice with their hands and without the use of that new buffalo Johnny bought for them with the money(ATM) machine(AKA Johnny) they( the smiling bar girls ) have discovered. Malcolm .-= malcolm´s last blog ..PAPAYA THE CANCER FIGHTER =-.

Mike as always thanks for the read and comment. I must admit I’m not a traditional whisky fan. Wilai who drinks on the very rare occasion is like so many Thai’s a whisky drinker. After sampling lao khao I can understand the Thai people getting a taste for whisky, anything is an improvement on that. I’ll stick to beer and Jack.

Hi Lawrence, good morning from a very sunny looking Wiltshire and it’s only seven morning time. The girls in the photos are rather nice but they are not my pictures. I sometimes use Webshots for my posts and these came from there, credits are at the bottom of the post.

Malcolm I did think about including Johnny Good but the post is more about those to be wary of rather than those many decent people. The Cash’s, Fat’s and Nightlife’s make little or no real willing contribution to the villages at all, they’re too much into their selves to do that. I don’t recall the Johnny Angel song as it was a bit before my time. If you sing it loud enough I might hear it from here. Cheers.

love the post certainly seems to catch a few of the typical stereotypes iam sure i fit in there somewhere we falangs seem to be cash cows for sure the girls will take your money for a little honey but be polite and play the game and keep your head on and a good time can be had but let the little head rule the big head and your heading into deep trouble seen too many old boys spend the lot on a bad one and end up heading back to Europe never to return totally broke some of them deserve it some do not regards john Johny big tummy some money and a little honey .-= john´s last blog ..new Thai biometric passport in london =-.

Martyn, another fine thought provoking post. Rick’s post was definitely one for the newbie and seasoned traveler as well with a lot of sound advice.

Being around Pattaya quite a bit I have seen all the different Johnny’s and the different type of bar girls as well. I think for the most part both sides take their knocks when there is probably a good mix of all in every Johnny and Bar girl.

I’ve heard one guy speak poorly about a girl while another says she is the sweetest thing in the world and likewise I have heard the girls speak the same way about the guys. It all comes down to individuals.

I read too many times from jaded tourists and expats alike that the newbie traveler to Pattaya or Bangkok should beware the famous Thai smile as it belies the truth…when in truth there is usually more to be wary of from the same expats and jaded tourists.

I don’t know if I’ve been lucky or or not but I have been treated very well by all the Thai’s I have met in Pattaya and Bangkok and the same by expats. I think for me it comes down to being nice, having a good time and minding my own business.

The one Johnny that I have noticed in the past year or so is the Johnny come lately. The young guys finding Pattaya and coming in groups. They seem to care about nothing but getting drunk and causing trouble whenever they get the chance. The girls don’t tend to care much for them nor do the expats and these new breed of Johnny’s seem to go home in body bags at an alarming rate. .-= Talen´s last blog ..Pattaya International Music Festival 2010 =-.

John as always you’ve given a thoughtful comment which also provides a little insight into your previous and younger Thailand days. I followed similar rules to yourself when I dealt with bar girls, I was always polite and respectful. I think that goes a long way with the girls and whilst there’s no guarantee it’s a little insurance against getting ripped off.

I’ve also seen a few old boys ripped off never to return. It’s a big basket but my advice is never put all your buffalo shit into it. Keep a bit back for the garden.

Talen I’m very much into your way of thinking. I have also been very well treated by the patrons of Pattaya. Adding all my Pattaya days together I have spent well over one year of my life there and cannot recall ever having a real bad day out of that lot. Sure I occasionally got overcharged on a bar bill but that also happens here in the UK. Unlike most western male visitors to Pattaya I have a lot of time for the bar girls because I’ve seen what’s under Pattaya’s glossy surface and that life isn’t that great for the girls themselves.

I’m a little undecided on whether ‘you can take the girl out of the bar but you can’t take the bar out of the girl’, I just know there’s a lot of western assholes who go in them. I also know there’s a lot of good honest falang as well.

I’ve always spoke up for the Thai bar girls and I will continue to do so. If you give respect I find you usually get a big slice of it back.

I saw the photo credits, I read every word. No, as your reply to Talen says, you’ve spent a lot of time in Pattaya bars, but still found time to do some ‘farang watching’. I like your inclusive take on Thai society and agree with what you say about respect. You would have to be totally deluded to think a bar girl’s life is an easy one. .-= Lawrence´s last blog ..Boun Pravet: Procession to the Wat =-.

Lawrence we’re expecting another sunny day here tomorrow with a high of 12 degrees, Thailand will be way above that at two in the morning.

A Thai bar girls life certainly ain’t easy but the Buddhist way of smiling through everything fools the falang newbies into thinking they’re happy all the time. There’s a lot of pressure and rivalry in the bars for the girls to earn money. I think they have to be a tough nut in many ways to do what they do.

First, the girls are there to earn money, but it doesn’t mean they do not have a heart. I believe they do and once you look past their skimpy costume and hot brown skin (pausing for a moment to collect myself . . .) , they are just like you and me, always happy to chat with a respectful, cheery, honest soul. I, like you, have met many very nice girls. I think what observant and experienced folks might want to say to the newbie is be wary of the odd girl who’s a little bit too nice, a little bit too enthusiastic, a bit too good to be true.

Now more to your point, I’ve met probably 10 times more asshole farangs than I have “Bad Girls.” But then I (think I) can spot bad girls from a few rai away.

Rick like you I like to think I can spot a dodgy bar girl or even an iffy falang from a mile away but I’m sure there’s been a few slip under my radar. Your 10 – 1 ratio is a pretty good guess in my book because I’ve met hundreds in my Pattaya days. The ones I really dislike are those who have been to Pattaya once before and try to tell me how I should go about my business. I nod and smile but behind my mask I’m thinking you’re going to get the ass ripped out of you. I also dislike those who pronounce Pat-tay-yah Pat-thai-a and won’t be corrected.

you would think most of the guys that lose the plot completely are just not that smart but from my experience there’s a lot of successful people with huge houses and egos to boot that walk blindfolded into the big house big car scenario don’t waste your time trying to give sound advice to this type they will not listen even when things go wrong you see they’re in a big hole and way too scared to get out of there they take your advise as nothing more then coming from a another jealous falang which in issan and Thailand there are many to be fair. if its your first time to Thailand spend the first couple of years getting to know the place before you jump in head first and chances are you will survive .-= john´s last blog ..Phu Phra Bat Historical Park, Udon Thani =-.

John many men may be smart when it comes to making money but a pretty face and cute ass are also sure fire assets to relieve them of it as well. We ‘falang’ don’t tend to take advice on board very well at all.

Your last sentence is sound advice and probably the biggest word in the ear you could give to any Thailand newbie.

John, good observations and advice. And you and Martyn are right, though: farangs do not take advice well, and most not at all. But they have other problems, such as lack of sensitivity and empathy, poor social skills, no control mechanisms . . . I could go on. You know what though, not our problem! Although they do provide lots of blog fodder, which is a good thing, I think! .-= Siam.Rick´s last blog ..Looking for Lao in all the wrong places =-.

This is an excellent post Martyn! I think your observations are spot on. I think that these girls do have a crap life and sure the money is great, but I bet all of them dream of so much more. We take our little two up two down houses for granted but it is probably a dream for people who support themselves off their little patch of land. .-= Emm´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday ~ 15: Spiralling =-.

Rick – John always comes up with a good comment, be it in the form of advice or one of his stories from the past. Your description of farang and their make up shows a lot of the problems they have, I wonder if we all have a slight bit of one of them in us all.

Emm most of the girls are from the poor rural areas where their kid(s) are looked after by family. A lot of the girls will be working for a basic wage of between £40 – £100 a month and have to pull customers to top that up.

yes its true if your in your 50s and considered over the hill in your home country There may still be chance of love in Thailand but beware saying that i know plenty of happy old boys’ who don’t mind there young girl playing around on the quiet so long as they get there bit of fun from £40 – £100 a month to all found some falangs are hot property in the land of smiles on the hole Thai girls are great mums and wife’s so tread carefully and find one and hopefully you will never look back a firm but fair attitude is what I think wins hands down in Thailand my wife still calls me a tight arse after 10 years but where still going strong johny happy out

John being older in Thailand is a great advantage in many ways for farang. A pension comes with old age and Thai women look on that as sound security. Older men are also less liable to stray and they haven’t got the ‘energy’ in the bedroom that the younger men have. Reaching 50 also makes it a lot easier to stay in Thailand on a more permanent basis.

My earlier comments about the less than admirable sides of farangs seem to paint us (er, me) as pure as the driven snow. No such thing of course, as you correctly point out Martyn. We can try though to show our best sides and with patience and especially understanding, live life in sync with our surroundings.

I’m with John on the “firm but fair” attitude. This applies in lives both west and east. But funny thing about Southeast Asia, it’s real easy to be struck by Weak Knees virus.

As for over 50 benefits, never thought I’d be happy to be over 55 until my company offered a better deal to those 55-65 to get out! And then Thailand offers a long-stay one-year visa for those over 50.

myself iam looking forward to getting older and hopefully wiser hoo don life in issan our anywhere in Thailand as got to better what ever problems then sat in some working mans club winging about the weather and life in general lets survive a few more years and retire early my college told me yesterday about is best man 43 fit as a flee just passed away with bowl cancer 6 months ago he was playing rugby so if anybody reads this and you have the funds to kick back in the land of smiles make the move you only get one shot at this life regards john

John as I read your comment I was just about to set off to my local working men’s club for a few Sunday lunchtime drinks and to watch the football. I know what you mean about moaning, the clubs are real bitchy places.

….If anybody reads this and you have the funds to kick back in the land of smiles make the move you only get one shot at this life……interesting statement John…..How much do you reckon someone at the age of 55 would need to last them in Udon for 10 years until their pension kicked in. Lets assume they have their village house paid for and have a car. My guess is about £75,000. Higher or lower.

Good post and some food for thought. It’s interesting to see how one owns perspective and expectations change over time, including the whole bar scene in Thailand. A bit of respect goes a long way though but one shouldn’t go over the top!

Camille thanks for your views and once again yours points to the same common theme of many others. Respect. Be it on the high street of your native hometown or in the sex soi’s of Pattaya, if you show respect then in general you’ll get a huge spoonful of it back. Especially so in Thailand.

Clearly the girls need to be on their guard with a lot of the guys who hang around the bars. I guess they can spot each type a mile away. That pretty much sums up a lot of the men you see hanging around the clubs on a Friday night.