I am the most evil villain you’ll ever meet…at least I thought I was. Lately I have been experiencing some weird & unusual feelings when doing the villainous things I used to love to do. It seems like only yesterday I would giggle with glee when placing old ladies in vats of sludge, but now when I do it I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. If I try to talk to my Henchmen about it, they’ll only scoff. Please help!

Dear Undercover Hugger,

It sounds to me like you are lover, trapped in clothes of a fighter. You seem to be developing what we in the hero world call Remorse. Remorse is a nasty little emotion that will kill a villain. That sinking feeling in your stomach will be the least of your problems if you keep up with your terrible acts. The pain and agony associated with long term remorse is like nothing you’ve ever inflicted before. My advice: Trade in your villainous lifestyle and embrace the Hero within. Go to Lunar’s Body Shop for a complete makeover. Nobody will recognize the new you and you can make a fresh start. Best of Luck!

JenQ Gossip Maven here. This just in on the exciting events surrounding the colossal mega challenge between Elephantic Gigantic Vigilantic and Mighty Cowboy Guy, and their affections for Sassy Jungle Kitty. It seems no one cleared the pending brawl with (guess who... you're gonna love this...) Sassy Jungle Kitty! When Sass caught wind of the feud over her affections, to say she got her dander up would be the understatement of the decade. Rumor has it she went wilder than a no-armed cyclopse in an eye poking contest! On unnamed Urbaniac who witnessed her outrage had this to say "First, she shot up into the air, did a few flips, then came down landing on her feet (of course) then she just started yelling at Cowboy and Elephantic, but it was hard to hear her over the beatings she was giving those two." Rumor has it, after Sass showed them who was boss, she promptly turned tail and left.. WOW! Can't wait to see what happens next.
That's the dish! JenQ very much.

Big props to all the Urbaniacs who took part in the first ever Rap Battle Contest. Here's your FIVE FINALISTS:
NotMyPresident, La_Betrave, Supa_Villain, DudeMan, and Tempest.

What these players face next is a fierce 8 line rap off for bragging rights as Rap Battle Champion! It's a fight to the finish, where winner takes all including the Homeboy Trophy and 5,000 Urbos.

Each Urbaniac has 8 lines to prove to the world that they should be Urbaniacs Rap Battle Champion. It all comes down to this! The contest ends on Saturday, September 24, 2005.

Wanna cast your vote? Please posts any words of encouragement in the Rap Battle QUESTIONS forum. To see these fierce competitors go head to head, click on down to the Mayor's Rap Battle Contest in the Freestyle section of the FORUMS.