User talk:Bebe malvado

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Hello, Bebe malvado, and a very good afternoon/morning/evening to you. Thank you for deciding to sign up to Uncyclopedia and I hope you wish to stay. If not, all you have to do is chew through your own fingers and retrieve the key from your eye to escape. Before doing anything though, may I suggest you read the following links?

I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button () above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but it certainly is a fun and easy way to express your creativity. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Bebe malvado/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well. A good idea before doing any writing for here would be to read (thurougly) HTBFANJS.

If you need help, ask me on my talk page, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, the Uncyclopedian Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply put {{adoptme}} on your Userpage to join. Again, welcome!

Now that's all the official stuff out the way why not also visit some of these other useful links:

Pee Review -- should you decide to write something it may be an idea to put it up for review. Reviews are a requirement of you wish to self-nominate an article for highlight but also is a good way of gauging how good your writing is and how you can improve it (if need be). Also if you choose to do a review for someone else at the same time be sure to read the Pee Review Guidlines.

Userboxes are a fun way of decorating your user page and conveying information about yourself (like if your a girl or gay or whatever) but are by no means necessary, and you are not obliged to tell us anything about you if you don't want to. In fact a user page isn't necessary but they can be fun, look at other people's user pages for ideas.

Also there are a few cults around here and user space pages that you can join in with that are good for making connections with people (But again aren't obligatory).

Join The CMC! Make Your Inner Cow Happy!

What is it about cows that gets us all hot and bothered? Where do cows come from? What are cows?

These are the questions that drive the Cow Moo Cult and its brethren, who are very, VERY interested in cows and cow by-products.

The CMC is devoted not only to cows, but to helping Uncyclopedia through general acts of goodness and through motivating people with cow-treats and the like.

So, Bebe malvado, why not join the CMC? It's free (unless you count virginity as money) and it's fun (and it's full of clichés)! You'll get a pretty template for your userpage and a nice title for your signature! What could be better? Sign Up Now!

You're in, you clearly fit these requirements and the Cows, obviously, smile upon you. You are currently a "Mud Grunt" by rank. Now the good bit: you can officially put this template wherever you want on your userpage or talk page and can add "Mgr." to the beginning of your signature, if you wish.

Promoting the CMC is always good, considering at the moment we're barely even tiny on Uncyclopedia. If you can refer users to sign up, consider yourself promoted. In time you'll move up the ranks anyway. Occasionally you'll have to put a little bit of work in here and there, but only a little bit... For the moment all you really need to do is watchlist this page. Your main task, however, is CONVERTING THE COWLESS. Have a quick read of this before you start and conversion processes. If you help swell the CMC ranks, it's likely you'll get a promotion!

I'm happy to answer any questions here. Oh and it's advised you read these (loose) rules. You are now one of the few with the Cows on your side.