About a year ago a pool buddy told me that “Terrys” had the best burger in Cincinnati we set out to find it but ended up lost in California. Yeah I know, California for cryin out loud, honest. Tried Googling but couldn't find info on Terry's anywhere.It was only after that I started hearing about Terry’s Turf Club, ah ha, that’s more like it. But we hit there one night awhile back and it was packed and no one looked like they were going anywhere and we ran out of time. Last Saturday we hit the sweet spot, no one was in there yet and after we sat down 20 people rolled in over about 15 minutes. Our server Lauren saying she didn’t drink and pushed us to make up for lost time. Crazy lady, but in a good way, the first time we ate and we already felt like long lost friends.But I can put all the debate to rest now, Terry’s has the #1 best burger in Cincinnati and the #2 burger in the world after Rockit. The burgers were just how they should be, the meat was packed just tightly enough to stay together, almost falling apart, and the juice ran down your face and arms. Perfect.The bill was wild, hand written, whens the last time you saw anything like that?One aside here, the fresh cuts fries. The first bite brought on waves of nostalgia that a Youngstown ex-pat would identify instantly. I could smell the elephant ears, feel the chill in the air and hear Kates grandfather over the public address system at the Canfield Fair letting Joe know to meet his parents by the fountain. Or Karen to meet her boyfriend by the merry-go-round. Yeah, for a quarter you could have anything announced you want.

After dinner Ms 5chw4r7z wanted to see The Santaland Diaries. Now, I’m a traditionalist and don’t like people f#@k!ng with Christmas. I get it, not everyone grew up like the Waltons and have the need to mock everything that other people hold on to as holy. I’m never letting go of Santa, he’s a state of mind.Anyhow, it wasn’t as bad as I thought being biographical, the acting was very good, takes some skills to pull off a one man show. The second act, Season's Greetings however was a whole different story. A quarter way through I totally shut it off and thought about more interesting things. HSRP, Jacob and Bella, the condo. You get the point.

Schwartz,Glad to hear you finally made it, knew you would love it, FYI Terry is a hard core publican like you. Did you notice the sign? I keep telling Terry he is missing a huge marketing opp, he needs to serve up a roll of paper towels with each burger. Try some of his killer cocktails next time, we are addicted to the Salty Dog. Oh yea, watch out for the blow dart gun.