Why do Beautiful Women date Ugly Men? Is a question as old as “Why do beautiful men date ugly women?” Well, we’ve got the answer to that one. Women feel that sexy men date unattractive women for the following reasons: A) She gives good sex B) She’s an expert on brainwashing, orC) He admires her and thinks she’s sweet *yawn* The End. That’s it. It dies there. Men, on the other hand, are ten times more clueless about women than what women are about men. We did our research and came across an article written by Relationship Correspondent, Curt Smith of AskMen.com. And he dared to answer the question hitting the nail right on the head, he says:

“As long as men keep reasoning that beautiful women date ugly or regular-looking men for their money, they will always miss out on opportunities to meet gorgeous women. Like my father used to say, ‘Son, assumptions are the mother of all screw ups. Never assume anything with women — unless it’s an acrobatic position. All she wants is an honest, trustworthy, fun man who can bring stability into her life.” (AskMen.com)

Smith also states that there are two types of men, the U-Men (Average Joe) and the G-Men (HOT STUD). He advises that the U-Men go for women who are “Rookie Girls.” By Rookie, he means, the Plain Jane who has potential on being a “Super Fox” if only she builds her confidence and fixes herself up. He warns to proceed with caution. After she finds herself and thinks she is finally beautiful, your hard work has potential on paying off for the next bastard, when she feels she could now land a G-Man (the one who probably ignored her before) and leave you, the U-Man, biting the dust. Smith (we like that guy), also expresses that if you want to get a hot girl, you’ve got to have the qualities of a hot guy, even if you resemble Ron Jeremy more than Brad Pitt. He says you must be, “A smooth talker, Fun, Spontaneous and a Real man.”

AMEN!

Smith is right on the money! He proceeds:

“Believe it or not, beautiful women have a hard time meeting men. The reason being that most men are intimidated by their looks. They think that because she looks good, she must be high maintenance, hard to get, already dating, and snobby. The few men that do approach her are all players who like to play head games just to get into her panties and claim her as a trophy. Some U-men that date beautiful women know this. They know that in most cases, beautiful women are single, fed up of head games and craving for a real man to approach them and desire them for who they are and not solely for their bodies.” (AskMen.com)

YES! He’s correct! We share Smith’s view on this issue. But now we’re going to give it to you raw (just how you like it) from a woman’s perspective. It is vital that men follow Smith’s cues. He’s accurate for the most part. Personally, I’ve met all types of Men, the rich and the poor. Some men like to flaunt the $$$, mula, cream, dinero. That’s a HUGE turn-off! When I stumble upon this kind of guys, I tell them if they’re looking for a prostitute there are plenty of them up on 42nd Street. If you’re one of those guys, women who fall for this trick are empty. If that’s what you like then that’s what you like. Then there’s the regular guy, the U-Man, who chats you up, with respect, and after a few minutes of conversing he then says, “Gee, you are so down to earth. I thought I had to be a super rich guy to get to know a girl like you.” What does this mean? He’s FINISHED! That’s also a HUGE turn-off. While women will date poor men with strong qualities, we will not date men with poor confidence who are judgmental.

Guys don’t get discouraged. Talk the talk and walk the walk. BUT be yourselves! Choose wisely and observe a woman, study her like an experiment. Yes. There are some gold digging women out there who give good women a bad name. Some of them are in it for the money or citizenship (sh!t, you never know), but not all! Most women aren’t bad. Most women want a man with a good head on their shoulders, someone who’s a good listener (that’s very important) and who is a true friend, he’s got to be funny, optimistic, ambitious, mature and RESPECTFUL. The great SEX doesn’t hurt either (okay, so that’s uber important). And know that these rules apply to all women you approach, even the insensitive ones, believe it or not, they have feelings too! Hey, they have fallen for someone some time in their life, that’s probably why they turned out the way they did!

But if you really, really want to know why beautiful women date ugly men, we’re going to tell you. Here’s the SECRET and a small scenario to explain to the MEN as to why:

A gorgeous man spots a gorgeous girl. He immediately thinks, “She’s so hot she’s got to be taken.” He overlooks her. The pretty girl never gets approached. She notices she’s being ignored by a hottie and thinks there’s something wrong with her. She’s clueless and distraught, but she tries to go on her merry way. A few minutes later, a really beastly, ugly-critter looking guy spots the gorgeous girl and he thinks to himself, “This girl is HOT! I’m going to take my chances, another rejection isn’t going to hurt, besides, I feel today is my lucky day!” Ugly guy approaches gorgeous girl. Gorgeous girl is confused as she thinks to herself, “No one really takes the time to get to know me, what the hell, he may be the one, I’ll give it a shot.”

TADA!

That’s WHY. Get over it.

-LR

In response to Curt Smith’s article on “Why do beautiful women date ugly men?” on Askmen.com

Joe Mama Says:

I think this man is full of Caca.
I agree with the first part of the U-men of seeing potential in a low confidence chick. I have to admit, I have created 4 foxes myself. Making sure they are the trophy in my arms. But I would never over feed them anything to make them fat, that’s just idiotic.

Most hot chicks, “not all“, are all about the money. That’s pounded into them by their mothers since they were little girls, they are told time and time again they have to marry somebody rich.

If you see a hot woman at the bar. With perfect hair, perfect makeup. dressed sexy. She’s is not going to be looking at your personality first. If she took the time to do herself up, its cause she is confident she is going to snag a hot, possibly rich specimen, so bring your A-game. Only way to get her past your mediocore looks is by having confidence and having charm.

Jana Marx Says:

I am going to be honest. I only date rich guys.
If you don’t have a nice car in the garage, so sorry for you. So Yes!! Joe Mama is right, my momma taught me well. A poor man can give me love, but a Rich man can buy my happiness.
I have a great body and nice face so might as well use what god gave me. Men are pigs and thats their nature.

Roxie Says:

That’s bullshit! ALL women love money, but the ugly ones are more gold digging than the beautiful ones!

My brother ran from hot girls thinking they wanted his money, he ended up marrying a simple, no make-up ugly type of gal who was more gold digging than any woman I’ve known!

He had to bring his paycheck to her and take her on a shopping spree every week! Ugly girls are more gold diggers dressed as lambs, but they are worst and it’s easier for men to fall for them since they are such “Plain Janes” the men never even suspect it.

Tina Says:

I date only cute guys, I don’t care if they are broke. My friends told me to date an ugly guy that they were nicer. I did. The ugly piece of shit turned out to be a jerk. Now, I only date hot guys. If they’re going to do me dirty anyway, I might as well take my chances with a hot guy!

JANA Says:

MONEY BUYS HAPPINESS BUT IT DOESN’T BUY LOVE!IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE IT LOOK AT J-LO SHE MARRIED TWICE AND HAD TO WAIT FOR HER HUBBY UGLY MARC TO DIVORCE DAYANARA TORRES (MS.UNIVERSE)SO SHE COULD FINALLY MARRIED HIM! HE STILL UGLY AND DOESN’T HAVE THE MULA LIKE SHE DOES!BUT SHE’S IN LOVE FOR NOW.

Kevin Says:

Carly Says:

I think Joe Mama is right on this one.
Perfect example on how women are soooo superficial look at this website.
Its all about the things that women wish to have and most would do anything ot have the 1000 purse. Including sleeping with uglry rich guys.

Karl Says:

This is rubbish,these women will only date ugly men,if the men are rich or famous or both,I am 41 women think I’m a nice guy,but because I’m ugly and poor the best I can hope for is friendship,I am still a virgin and hate my lonely life and I’m tired of being prick teased and rejected by women,I also hate being called a pervert and getting abuse when looking at what they are hanging out in front of me,my only good feature is my legs,and when I show them in my cycling shorts women both look and say things to me about them,but the other way around they think is wrong,anyway,my point is,if you’ve nothing to offer women won’t want to know you, you see well off ugly men with women,but how many ugly men on the dole get anywhere,they remain like me forever lonely and unwanted.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. There’s someone for everyone. Women love confident men. I cannot stress that enough. STOP calling yourself ugly and poor. You may be poor, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You will not be lonely forever, you even said it women love your legs, that’s something beautiful about you. There’s more to looks and we’re sure many women overlook imperfections. Start your day with a new attitude, a positive mind will take you anywhere you want to go.

Terra Says:

Actually i think this has all been a little over thought..Beauty and attractiveness and sex appeal are in the eye of the beholder. I have seen guys that other women gush over that I thought were total dogs. Everyone including “beautiful” people have their taste. Also you don’t have to be HOT to be sexy.

Eliza Says:

The last theory is so true!
I am gorgeous and yes, being 16, I have never even kissed a boy. I’ve been doing modelling for 1,5 years now, and people often tell me how beautifull I am.
The only guy that ever really tried to hit on me was yes hot, but SUCH a jerk, the player type.

After months of talking with an average guy he finally says: So, you have a Boyfriend
I go; no, I never had
he: what?! how’s that possible, you’re so beautifull and sweet

well, I think I just lost my heart to the U-guy

Tammy Says:

As a teenager I wasn’t very attractive and I didn’t really care, but I was totally laid back and I ended up dating alot of hot guys. Now as an adult, I married a guy I never felt was hot, but has every other quality that I feel most women look for. Honest, trustworthy, always there for you, loves you to pieces and so on. You know. SAFE. Did I mention that I was a late bloomer and now I’m not bad to look at (don’t want to sound conceited or anything), but I am much hotter now. After 10 years of marriage, I wish my husband was hot. JUST HOT! *Sniff*

kris Says:

Michael Says:

I’ve heard many similar things to what fashaddix said to Karl from the mouths of plenty of women. They always sugarcoat it and tell guys who aren’t having any luck with the ladies (including myself) that everything will be alright and that there is someone for everyone out there. The truth is, its a cruel world “They say don’t let this cruel world get yah. Kinda suspicious,
swearing one day you might leave me for someone thats richer” – Tupac Shakur
Even though there are almost 7 billion people on our little blue planet, plenty of people are gonna stay single their entire lifespans. Sugarcoating the truth only does a disservice to men. If the stuff a guy has been doing for 30 years hasn’t been working, why is it gonna suddenly going to start working now? Magical fairy dust or something? Stop living in a fantasy world. “This ain’t no Mister Roger’s neighborhood” – Suicidal Tendencies. You’ve either got to make some drastic changes or just give up and focus on other aspects of your life. You don’t need a women to find some semblance of happiness or satisfaction in your life. Also, saying that pretty women get passed over all the time is the biggest load of crap i’ve ever heard (not really, but you get my point).

David Turley Says:

You have a valid point. Alot of guys are riding on the asshole express, even the ugly ones. I’ve had a couple friends that could freak out ugly Betty, that would treat attractive females like crap. I think if your an attractive or ugly guy, why not be nice to the girl. I’m not saying to kiss her ass, she’s got her girlfriends to do that. If a girl finds a guy that is attractive in her eyes and has a nice personality, you’ll be a diamond in her eyes.

Jay Says:

Many of the gold digging women who posted here are ignorant. I cannot count the number of times that a woman said she wouldn’t do something, that she wanted more, or that certain things didn’t matter…’you name the bla bla bla’ and YET she did whatever I wanted.

Women think…money or good looks, but in reality they all make exceptions to their rules. And most of the “pretty women”, once you take off their make-up, subtract their push up bras, shaved bodies, fake finger nails, colored fake hair…and everything else they do to make it appear they look better…”THEY REALLY DON’T LOOK MUCH HOTTER THAN ANY GUY”.

It’s humorous to see a woman with so many ‘fake assets’ running around on a fake pedestal thinking men (who aren’t ‘cheating’ with their looks like she is) are ugly, or that men should just take their money and give it to her. **LOL**.

The upshot for men is there are many women. If one says no, just like in sales, you can just move on to the next one. If a man finds the right woman…”excellent”. But if not, we can just dump her and get a new one.

It is not complicated, it is not based on looks. It’s just based. If a woman doesn’t like me and I like her, my passion for her will alter her state of mind and emotions. Appreciation feels good, touch and physical contact feels good, comfort feels good, and so does sex.

If a woman acts like she doesn’t like any of the above, she is ‘romantically retarded’. The gold diggers above need a parent to take care of them, not a man. They are losers who skipped school in order to make enough money to take care of themselves.

Rich men, like me, when I notice a woman is gold digging, I just dump them and get another one. So to all you gold diggers…once a rich man has gotten what he has wanted (and you’re just after his money), he will toss you aside. If you don’t give him what he wants (wanting his money first), he will toss you aside.

If you, on the other hand, are kind, etc…then we’ll keep you. You can share our money, but no, you can’t just come take it cause your pretty (or because you alter your looks to appear as pretty).

Can you men count the number of times we couldn’t even recognize a woman the morning after when her make-up wore off?

Yet, most of us are tolerant and don’t mind. So, why do women act so picky?

Golddiggers are losers. One woman, once she came to my place, kept hinting how she couldn’t pay bills, she was going to get kicked out, etc. I could tell she just wanted money (classic gold digging strategies), so I just turned her around, put her in my B.M.W…and drove her home (she was having a temper tantrum cause I wouldn’t move her AND her daughter in my house).

So much for her…I feel sorry for gold diggers. They usually live lonely lives. Even if they find a rich dumb guy, what happens when they gain weight and are no longer pretty (age perhaps?). Yup…they get cashed in for another younger woman. OR they just get cheated on. Why… cause they were empty gold diggers to begin with.

Only real women with real personalities get the best men. The gold digger loser girls, the “I have fake breast so I’m a better deal than flat chested women” girls, are only good for temporary pleasures.

Their high and lofty expectations are rarely fulfilled.

Jay Says:

BTW…sometimes I love to date an average looking girl (who is really far above average in my book) who is friendly, and just watch the fake bimbos try to compete for my attention because they think they are more beautiful than the woman I am with (when in reality they are not…just more “made up”).

LR Says:

Meeka Says:

An interesting article with alot valid responses to…’why beautiful women date ugly men’ is only a question they can answer…Each to their own…We only have a short time on this earth to play, work and love…don’t analyze or critice others, thats hard work..be true to yourself and what/who you are looking for will eventually find you…

ugly shit Says:

Being a fugly shit means that I get first choice of beautiful women over disposable real men. I have “queer as fuck” genes which I display in the bar regularly and this sometimes gets me a beautiful woman but always gets me a shit fuck man. We spend all night humping and pumping untill we are covered in shit in the morning. It feels so good to be a member of the shit faced master race.

handsome man Says:

Why do beautiful woman breed with the ugliest bit of shit that they can find? You know that it’s because ugly men suck the shit out of a beautiful womans arsehole which makes them think that the shit are holy.

GOD Says:

I made ugly shit so that they can fuck any other piece of shit that has got a hole in it. I made beautiful people for the pleasure of the same. Any contact between the two makes good comedy and for armageddon when the comedy gets a little more sorious.

Louisa Says:

I am a woman and do not love money. I’d like enough to live in an average sized house, but I’d much rather be with the one I love living on the streets than live in a mansion with someone I hate or on my own.

LR Says:

shoshana Says:

well let me tell you something from my point of view beautiful women date ugly men because this something which happens in majority but that doesn’t mean that it always happen. that is definetly not true because it’s not about beautiful women.you can just say women are like a tree full of fruits either a pretty or an ugly guy came to her and started eating her fruits later on he will feel bored and won’t thank god of what he gave him when he was hungry , and this guy will simlpy go to another fruitty tree{means: another women} and start eating it’s fruits to change the taste of the fruits before that he ate.while on the other hand some men go to this tree {women} and start eating it’s fruit but you know what they won’t leave this tree because they won’t forget how grateful this tree was by giving him food and shelter when he was tired and hungry. it’s all about love and respect it’s not about beauty beauty . haven’t you ever thought that beauty never lasts what happens if you made an accident and you lost this beauty or after you r getting older all these things could easily vannish your baeuty {appearence} but what really lasts your beauty of inside by being yourself not somebody else, well let me give another example if you entered an shop and you found two c-d of your favourite movie both are having the same price but one is the original and the other is the replica which one would you choose ofcource the original , so imagine yourself this “c-d” be the original be yourself , don’t be the replica or copy of somebody’s character.

This is so stupid, from a U man Says:

This is so ridiculous. Sure, a big part of all of us, good looking, average, or those who are an acquired taste, longs to find a partner who is top notch hot, but that mostly has to do with sex and fantasies, appetites, etc. This article overlooks the fact that a sweet, nice girl (or guy for those gals and gay men out there) is quite irresistible, specially when thinking of a partner to go back to, rather than a one night stand. And confidence is far more attractive than Naomi campbells body, or a six pack. Being “subpar” and feeling confident and sexy in your own skin is probably why super hot people are attracted to those types. I love it when a girl that may have a little extra to her shows she is confident in her body, it makes you question what is it that gives her that confidence, and then any little detail that is kinda hot or cute about them is multiplied by ten!!! And NO, guys do get hurt by rejection, and they DON”T “fatten” their girlfriends with chocolate to keep them around. That is just ridiculous. All these articles making relationships seem soo complicated are a big reason why people feel afraid to approach one another; all good relationships have one thing in common, they are SIMPLE.

Dan Says:

Karl I feel for you man. I am a 22 year old male who is also a virgin. and i have to say my experience with women has not been positive. I have low self-esteem, have contemplated suicide a few times and feel as though things will not get better. Though i am still fairly young i think it is fucked up that people make fun of people because they are still virgins.Shit man I feel so bad about what you said I am crying. I feel bad for you, me and any other guy who has felt this way for as long as you or I have. I don’t know what I can say or do to make you feel better. I wish there was something. But all I can say is screw all the fucking whores on this blog that only date men for there looks and vice versa. They are selfish, ignorant people. I really hope you read this man. Btw I like what fashaddix and Terra had to say. Their comments really inspired me to keep going on in life, so thank you I wish more women were like the two of you and looked for other things other then beauty and money.

Dan, so sorry to hear about your thoughts on suicide. You’re still very young and have your whole life ahead of you! So what you’re not getting any women just yet, in due time you will! Being young is beautiful, you are a handsome man, and I don’t need to see you to know this. There’s something beautiful in everyone! Look at Patrick Dempsey as an example. He always talked about how women never liked him because he was a very thin guy who never got that many gigs either because of his looks. Now, he got better with time (just like wine) and women are throwing themselves at him!! Please, if you ever consider suicide (which is not the answer!!!) and you reside in the United States please call 1-800-273-8255 for help.

Also, I run a website call menconfess.com. I have a reader who confessed to losing his virginity in his LATE 20′s and he is happily married to the woman he lost it with. If I may add, I had a friend at FIT who looked just like Tom Cruise!! And he decided to wait on losing his virginity until he turned 23, because he didn’t like women who were easy. So it doesn’t have to do with looks! It is just timing.

Thank you for stopping by FashAddiX.com. Have a little patience, one way or another, we always get what we want out of life even if it may not seem like it at the moment, in due time it will! XoXo

~FashAddiX

so very much true Says:

the women out there today that are straight, are turned on by very ugly men. then again, women love money so that would very much be the reason. i mean god forbid, if they would like a man for himself. most of the women out there now play very hard to get, and at my age it is hard for me to meet women now. they are very trashy, and there are a lot of lesbians more now than ever before which makes it a whole lot worse. i seem to meet all the low life women myself instead of the good ones. i really cannot blame myself for what these women have become now. these women must have been dropped on their heads when they were born, which explains it.

exactly right says Says:

women get turned on by ugly low life scumbag guys, why i do not know? these type of women that are straight always seem to go after these guys, especially if they have a lot of money. that is why us good straight men are having a hard time meeting the right woman today. then again, i always seem to meet the women that are filthy no good pigs anyway.

exactly right says Says:

women today that are straight are so turned on by very ugly low life scumbag men, especially if they have a lot of money. why is that? i cannot understand that one. today it seems the ugly look is in, go figure. but there are also a lot of women today that are lesbians, which explains why us good looking straight men are having a hard time meeting good women now. the straight women will go with ugly rich men, and the lesbians will just carpet munch. us men are not to blame for the women that have become garbage today.

LOLA Says:

I think looks are not that important what important is a loving, caring, supporting partner who will be there all the time . As you grow up you see that looks are not so special look at Heide and Seal she is pretty and he is ugly(well I don’t find anyone ugly) but they make a cute couple and you can see there are happy and it the realy thing.I am not that pretty myself only pretty with makeup on so who am I to say someomeone is ugly imagine if there was no makeup…..aish let not even go there

LOLA Says:

Some women date pretty boys but there are not happy what is the point……..I rather be happy, be cuddle,loved,spoiled,and good sex then date someone because of how they look.most pretty boys I dated there were horrible in bad and didn’t have time for me……..life is to short we need to find someone that makes us happy!!

John L. Walker Says:

You Miss, are a despicable cunt and I sincerely hope that in your quest to “snag a good ‘un” you end up with a case of genital herpes so bad that you will be begging the guy who cleans that toilets at Burger King to take you out on a date.

Jenni Says:

I have dated the ugliest men (were they really even???) on the planet and they turned out to be abusive cheating assholes. My fiancée is by far the most gorgeous man I’ve ever seen, and we met in a Kroger parking lot for crying out loud! I had been having a rough night, I was crying, my makeup was smeared and on top of that I had a cold but he still approached me and my group of friends, stuck his hand through the open window of my truck and introduced himself! I’m no “plain Jane” so often I get negative attention and this introduction shocked me so much I believe I began liking the man on the spot. Money has never been a priority with me, and I’m glad because this man who turned out to be the love of my life has taught me so much and given me so many great memories throughout the time we’ve been together that in my eyes, no amount of money or diamonds could ever compare. So my point is, love who you are guys. Go beyond the norm and be yourself. -Catch- her attention…never try to BUY it!

so much right Says:

lets face it, all the ugly looking men seem to be getting the attractive women now. what is up with that? as a straight man, this makes me want to vomit. i was married twice myself at one time, and was a very caring and loving husband that never cheated on them and they did cheat on me. i was very committed to them at the time as well, the word, filthy whore was on their foreheads at the time and i did not see it. had i known, i would have never married these filthy pigs and i would have saved a lot of money over the years. i lost thousands of dollars because of them. now meeting a good women is very difficult for me, since they are going after ugly men with a lot of money. then again, who would want these pigs anyway.

right on says Says:

pingu_from_india Says:

speaking from my personal experience….i was single until the time i landed at a good government job…lookswise i would rate myself same as people do… that is—a good and a innocent looking guy ….but it was mostly my shyness that stopped me from approacing women who seem to be interested …coz i was nt sure if they really were …and when i found out that they even named there babies they planned to have with me……it was too late….and they were hooked with some fugly bastard

Damien Says:

Im going to tell you the real answer, NO woman on this planet will date anyone they consider UNATTRACTIVE, and with women this isnt all about looks.
Taking a woman out is the easiest and most basic thing in the world. And out of pure confidence im about to prove it right here and now.

If your a woman reading this, and you think your my equal and want me to get to know you better, then get typing (english is preferred and no long words i kinda loose focus if i have to google) if you have a good sense of humour dont expect me to do everything you want all the time without rewarding me, are ambitious and confident and not afraid to laugh at ourselves then tell me why i should take my time and affection to know you. I know some of you cheeky minxes will write just to prove me wrong, thats fair enough but expect a response back.

franko Says:

well guys it seems the UGLY LOOK AS ARRIVED, and many women nowadays are turned on by that. GO FIGURE. i see it when i go to the clubs on the weekends. there is this one VERY UGLY MAN, that seems to get the ATTRACTIVE WOMEN to dance with him all the time. but i doubt very much he gets to go home with THEM. but, you never know.

carol Says:

dingo Says:

Hot women are with ugly dudes bcz ugly dudes are forced to grow a personality, riches or both. Its a generalisation, but yes, the hottest women are more likely to have a superficial shopping list: car, money, etc, but you can’t blame them.Society has women scored on looks and men on financial success, why would a woman in the top of her group –for looks– settle for average joe when she could live a ollywood lifestyle? Women spend a lot of effort, time and money looking that good, the best have their looks as their career, their job is too look pretty, they’re going to want to be rewarded financially, to be taken care of, not to work and look that good. The man gets to have a hot woman and she gets to enjoy is money- the only exception is where badboys/players come in. I can say I’m pretty good looking and well built, I’ve never had a girlfriend and to be honest unless someone I also like makes the moves necessary to convince me it can work, I’m probably going to make myself single into old age- I like women for their good points, but when it comes to getting involved a level above friendship I just don’t trust them. I really believe it’s too easy for hot women to manipulate men. The way I see it you can be a nice guy and get walked all over, or you become an a-hole player and manipulate them. I don’t want to be a player, ergo I either allow myself to get walked over or I just reject everyone. I would rather reject everyone and stay single than be manipulated.

dingo Says:

LR Says:

Dingo, that’s a defense mechanism. You are avoiding getting hurt so you leave women before they leave you. Not always a good thing and not all women are the same. Be mindful that if you find the one you may let her go. Being single can be fun, but there will come a time when you will need someone by your side, in your life, who is for keeps. It is good to guard your heart, but do not let it stop you from finding true love.

dingo Says:

There’s nothing fun about being single, possibly it’s simpler and less complicated- you live for yourself and that’s it, but I don’t want to get hurt and knowing what women are capable of, it seems like too great a risk for the sake of chasing a rainbow.

Rico Says:

Courts Says:

I was bought up to be a “label basher” my mum dressed me in nike tracksuits and reebok pumps whilst other kids had no shoes at all when i was a kid in primary school (5yo-10yo)
I like nice things especially cars and i became a bad boy , working and selling stolen goods to buy cool cars. I spent all my money on cars, rims, clothes and buying bottles at the club. I lived life lavishly and was extremely arrogant yet shy to allow people in. I didnt have to do anything to get a girl they would actually just come to me. And that exPlains it all -most good looking girls like material things. They wanna be seen in your. Ar and be showered with presents. The problem was the girls i attracted were always a bit crazy and we’d have turbulent relationships. I was in the mindset i could get any girl i wanted but bearly needed to approach any! Infact i made myself known to them by walking By with other girls or driving past in a cool car. It always worked. Now i started to get close to being put in prison as i was a major fence and was on the brink of getting caught and had assosiated with people whom were constantly under surveliance. So i gave it up at age 24. I ended up breaking up with my gf cos she cheated on me and moved country. I decided i am going to change my life and be a good person all round the one my family had raised – not this
Playboy rebel with a police kerfew. I had always been a nice guy in my heart and treated my gf’s with respect and helped them grow. And now that i am a real me, a grown-up more reserved and down-to-earth chap. (i still have a small bad boy streak in me) the women have all gone! And i dont know whether its because of my rep (back home everyone knew me) or its just because of my image change. Anyway a lot of girls hurt me and i dont find it easy to trust any (had 2 bad experiences in a row in new country) so i really just dont know whats going on … Im now 29 single and i al in really good shape (Arrogance not intended but im ripped big time) so im def better looking than i was ….. I have my own business . But i just caNt aPproach random girls – blame it on never having to and going to an all-boys school
Where are all the nice girls out there????

LR Says:

Hi Courts! There are really nice girls out there! I meet them all the time and they are always asking where are the nice guys. Apparently, not in the same zip code. You MUST approach a girl you like. Always show genuine interest. Many men do NOT try and it leaves women dating ugly guys. You say you have a nice body. Believe it or not many women are insecure, perhaps they may think you are too good looking for them. It is hilarious, I’m in the fashion industry, and I hear lots of beautiful women say how ugly they think they are (especially because men don’t approach them!!) and I hear UGLY women say how HOT they are, it makes me want to jump out of the empire state building.

Am glad you cleaned up your act. The right gal will come along. Keep doing the right thing with a positive mindset and you will attract the right people.

LR Says:

STRAIGHT MAN SAYS Says:

i am a STRAIGHT MAN that lives down the shore, and many of the women down here have that SHIT DON’T STINK OF AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM. very trashy, low life, GARBAGE WOMEN down here. i will walk on the BOARDWALK a lot, but trying to say HELLO to a woman seems VERY COMPLICATED since many of them will have their NOSE up in the air. not my FAULT that women are so MESSED UP TODAY, and what makes matters worse, they will be with the UGLIEST MEN that i have ever seen. i am a good looking man, so looking at this is certainly very disgusting to me. then again, these men must have PLENTY OF MONEY, since many women nowadays do certainly take advantage of men that have money. and i know someone that this happened too just recently. MEETING GOOD WOMEN today has certainly become a challenge for us men that are SERIOUSLY looking. years ago, the times were different and meeting women was a lot EASIER than now. many women now think that they are all that, but there not. i was hurt very much at one time, when i was married and my wife CHEATED on me after being with her for almost FIFTEEN YEARS. that is the problem in my state, women just can’t seem to be COMMITTED to just only ONE MAN like they did years ago. you certainly can’t call a woman an ANGEL, that cheats. now i can see why meeting good women is VERY HARD NOW, especially in my area.

Søren Sørensen Says:

Well, Jana as another Marx would have said it is all about capital/money and power. That is what it is all about in dull times. On the other hand, if you are in a situation like on aboard Titanic, a plane crash and you work together with a man a stranger saving your lives, money does not count. On the same side in a civil war you will take a courageous man. You name it. Almost any man is afraid of a exceptional beautiful woman.He knows that if he is with her and looks away for less than a second other men will try to steal her away. Powerful men and beautiful women are attractet to each other. Since the dawn of mankind? Greatings Søren. Denmark

George Says:

Dan, that’s pretty sad. what I have to say is that even if you don’t think you’re ever going to get any action or find a person that’s right for you, you have to realise that those thoughts are simply your mind overreacting to the situation. it’s likely the reason that you’re still a virgin. what you need to do is get some nice clothes. stuff that goes well together. nothing with logos all over. then you need to go out and talk to women. I lost my virginity late for my country, I was 17. I thought it would never happen. Then i went to a house warming party, got drunk, met a drunk girl and had sex. we dated for a while then i met someone else. I don’t get a lot of sex, but that’s more out of choice than anything else. I like to save my money now. what you should do after getting laid is concentrate on a career, an occupation that will make you happy. pick an industry that you think you want to work in and start in the first entry level job, find out what goes on there and look into the top jobs, and figure out what education you need, there are lots of jobs that can be grabbed by learning from home. i’m doing a course right now, but i started in a shit job. the job sucks but the money is good, and now i’m going somewhere with it. once you feel that you’ve gathered some momentum, you’ll feel great, and the cash will make you feel pretty good too. give yourself a 2 year target with small goals every 2-3 months. trust me, things get better. I’ve been through debt, fucked relationships, being attacked by so-called friends, almost losing my home 3 times, court hearings, being arrested and charged for something that had nothing to do with me. I got through it all and paid the debt. you just have to remember that if your problem hasn’t already killed you, then you can overcome it. being a virgin is not a fatal disease, and you can beat it.

George Says:

OK, dude – I honestly think that you have some problems. Fist of all, no one said that the world is magic and that what a guy has been doing for 30 years is suddenly going to work. the fact is, negative thinking is very easily picked up on in cenversation. if you’re talking to a girl and you’re not confident and can’t relax, she will notice and feel uncomfortable because like everyone else, she is sensitive to the feelings that people unconsciously convey. plus, it’s likely that the negative thinking is going to stop most guys from even talking to a woman. you can’t get laid without doing some talking first. what i’m saying is that guys who think they can’t get laid won’t. if they want to get laid they have to start being honest with themselves. people like you need to stop believing that all women are shallow bitches and that the world is wrong. that’s a delusion of your own making so that you can avoid being honest with yourself and admitting that what you are doing isn’t working. you’re basically being lazy and providing yourself with an excuse to avoid a major upheaval in your life and way of thinking. what you have to do is realise that you must change, and then plan how you will acheive it. stop being an underconfident pussy, and just go for it. what’s the worst that could happen? you might not get laid – well holy shit, that’s pretty much what’s already happening. at least if you try as hard as you can, then you can say that you did endeavour to get where you wanted.

Thanks George for your insight and testimony. Sometimes we are meant to suffer hardships in life, overcome them, and then help others in the future based on what we learned out of our experience. Very nice of you!

Does it matter? Says:

I tend to think I’m a good looking guy. I’ve dated good looking & beautiful women. Some would brag to their friends about me…yada, yada, yada. Truth be told, I’m actually very shy, humble, & despite getting lots of looks and attention from women. When I am getting attention from a woman, I can’t help but wonder she’s got ulterior motives, or, seriously just into ME.

I must have some crazy personality flaw or something though. I’ve had girls lose interest in me for some crazy reasons:

* I didn’t bang her in the a$$ (immediately) after she said she’d like to try it.
* Despite my being well endowed, an ex cheated on me with a big black guy.
* I wasn’t comfortable fu*king the first time I was invited over a woman’s place.
* I didn’t think an evening would lead to sex (after such a short time), so I didn’t have protection with me. Woman lost interest and I never heard from her again.
* An ex-g/f of mine cheated on me with her ex (who turned out to be gay!)
* A chick comes on to me at a party. Kisses and makes out with *me*. Exchanges numbers with me. She doesn’t return my call until 2 weeks later. As it turns out, I had to work overtime the day she randomly called me back. I told her I’d like to go out with her another night. Never heard from her again.
* I kissed a woman on a first date that went so well. She grabbed me and wouldn’t let me go. Never heard from her again.
* Began dating a woman and things were going very well. Good chemistry. Great sex. Much in common. One day, I get an email saying “I’m going back to my boyfriend”. Take care! I had no idea she had a boyfriend to begin with!
* Woman wanted sex the 2nd meeting. I said I’d like to get to know her more before we jumped into that. She got extremely angry and would never talked to me again.
* I dated a sophisticated, intelligent black girl. *Extremely* beautiful! After two months of dating, she confessed why I could never meet her father: He hates white people!
* I was friends with a woman. I was not attracted to this particular one, but she was cool. One day she mentioned she would like to date. I said I considered her a good friend and I wasn’t looking for a relationship (my way of saying I think she’s cool, but I’m not attracted to her) without bluntly telling that to her. She then started a huge campaign accusing me of being “gay”.
* Any woman I’ve had sex with wanted me to do all types of weird freaky shit to them/with them. Some things I bit the bullet and did, because I really liked the girl. Most of the time, I tried expressing what I liked and was into FORGET IT! Woman disappeared. (BTW, I wanted to give her a full body massage). Is that weird??? I can’t even say the fu*ked up shit she wanted me to do but it wasn’t harmless like a massage!
* I gave a drunk girl at the bar a ride home because two friends couldn’t and I didn’t want her driving drunk. To repay me for my kind actions, the woman REFUSED to get out of my car unless I let her blow me!
* I went out to a local karaoke bar some years back. I was watching a ball game with a friend on the big screen when, (all of a sudden) this beautiful woman comes up out of nowhere and plants a huge one on me and proceeds to try and make out with me. It was sexy and spontaneous, but once I pried the woman off and actually tried to *talk* to her, I noticed she has a pair of crutches she had with her (I’m assuming she recently sprained her leg or something). When I tried talking with her she bit my arm and walked away! WTF????
* I was out at a fancy bar/lounge area with friends. I went up to the jukebox to play some songs. A beautiful woman came up to me, pressed her body into mine and started heavily grinding/coming onto me. Being out with friends and not looking to “hookup” I talked with her for a bit. She wanted to fu*k so bad and some “gut-feeling” told me to stay away. So I brought her over to my friends and one of them took her home and banged her. Every time I see this woman out, she gives me very cold, “if looks could kill” stares, and sort of follows me around from time to time.

Why would ANY of these experiences ever make me want to get back into the dating game? Fu*k, maybe that’s why I’m AFRAID to talk to women now. And If time would permit, I bet I have a dozen more stories even crazier than that!

I think women are convinced they “know what guys think”, “all men are PIGS”, “all women know what a guy wants”, blah blah blah. Society has reinforced this notion into the minds of many women. I think this is why you see this type of behavior. Perhaps its’ the area of the country I live in? Or in the water? I can’t find a “decent” woman who just wants ME for me, so I just gave up. I can’t play games. When I am ME and stand up for what I believe in and am MYSELF, I get nowhere. Yet, I can put on a hollywood-academy award winning act, transforming myself into a suave, smooth talking, overly confident, spontaneous jackass and bang women with ease! What kind of life is that? Its’ pathetic! I shouldn’t have to do that! Where are these women that wish to TALK? Where are the women who actually don’t FU*K on the first date? Where are the women who CARE about what a man wants?

Too bad I wasn’t born 100 or more years ago when men could actually court women, and women were LADIES, acted, and were rightfully treated as such. Not some “I shower 5x a day and spent $500 to look perfect tonight, I wear a pound of fake makeup, sport a pushup bra, boast a fake tan, my shit doesn’t stink, I listen to all the club bangin’ tunes and have no culture, am clueless about life or what they want. How the hell am I ever going to make YOU happy when you don’t know what YOU want ???

Fu*k that, I’d rather be single for life then have to have a 2nd job as YOUR psychiatrist!

mike Says:

Find a nice church you are comfortable with. Most have groups for singles.
Not every woman in these groups is emotionally solid, neither are the men but the likelihood of finding one who is stable is greater. They believe, even non-Christians, that life is bigger than the material world we live in and the reason for their existence is beyond their capacity to comprehend.
Secularists, to a certain degree, are the types of people you describe. They don’t go to church, they go to nightclubs.
This is an obvious over simplification but I think it makes the point.

Have you guys visited my other site…MenConfess.com? You should! “Does it matter” let me know if you want to do a video for us. I agree with “does it matter” that not many women are behaving like ladies. We tend to think men are after one thing and so we give up and try to do the same. I am saying “we” because I am a woman; although, I assure I’m not like that. But I tell some of my girlfriends, “How do you expect him to take you seriously if you slept with him on the first date?!” The thing is *some* women do think men are pigs and we don’t take into account that men are humans, they need love too. Yes, they are sexual creatures just like us women, but sex is not always fulfilling when it is with someone they use for pleasure. I have more male friends than female ones who always call me up to vent (hence, why I created menconfess.com) and it saddens me. They get tired of having meaningless sex and are in search of “the one.” That one special girl. They say after having sex with women they don’t even care for they end up feeling dirty and empty. So, not all the men are the same, just the same way, not all the women are the same. “Does it matter” I think you should listen to Mike. I’m Christian and I’ve met some wonderful people in church who think differently. Not trying to instill my faith in anyone, but it does make a huge difference. Great suggestion Mike!

mike Says:

Just to expand a bit. I am , I can’t believe I’m actually saying this a bit older. I’ve hit the half century mark. I’ve seen and paid close attention to how our modern media positions the idea of the ideal cool life. Drink the tight beer, now more recently the right liquor and sports is our national religion. None of these things are bad in their proper context but we were led to believe these and other similar activities are the road to a fulfillment. It’s not!!
To LR’s point men are indeed sexual beings and we are staying that way longer thanks to modern medicine. Most men like relations very much.
Over the years I’ve done the one night thing, nothing like “does it really matter” although some are real fantasy’s guys have on occasion particularly when they’ve been solo a while.
This commentary is meant to be truthful and as such I really believe at.first a little physical chemistry starts the process . Seems obvious I know but aside from the physical attraction there has to be common interests, the people have to have similar perspectives, as time rolls on agreement on money management is nearly as important as sharing spiritual perspectives. Most important is this woman must be your friend, not only must you come to love this person you have to like her and she you. Respect and I don’t mean the fear type but the like type.
Old expression “behind every successful man is a good women and visa versa. She is your rock when times are tough and you are hers in the same situation. Bottom line a man and a woman must really like the other person. She let’s him be who he is without an agenda to change him and of course visa versa. Nothing like having a great friend in your women. I’ve seen it with others couples , although rare but who would want less.

Marrs Says:

Does it matter: Are you serious!? Either you and your story are full of Sh.t or you have a very serious confidence problem. It’s guys like you that make guys like me what ot slit our wrists (up the arm, not across).
Lookit’, I’m not probably not as attractive as you, but I only date attractive women, and any average guy (your’s truely included) offered sex on the first night, or anal or anything else, is gonna take it!
Please, let your balls drop, or find a nice guy to date.

To the OP: Great article! I enjoyed your writing style and the subject matter. On most of it I agree. The only problem I have is the spinless prince who wrote a novel (which I didn’t get past the first paragraph) and rien what was otherwise an enjoyable conversation.

Claudio Says:

Yes!!! And not only that. The girl could be 40 years younger than the man, and the relationship will still work.
It is not US citizenship what most of these foreign girls are after, but rather the possibility of getting out of poverty: to arrange their lives with a man who will probably be polite and clean, not a drunkard or a wife beater –as they usually find in their own countries.

Claudio Says:

It is true that many men are intimidated by pretty women and do not dare hitting on them, while uglier men –more used to be rejected– don’t care anyway and, more often, they jump to the challenge and sometimes get lucky.
But that seems an incomplete explanation, so I’d like to contribute with my two-cents-worth evolutionary (Darwinian) approach to the subject matter. I am not kidding.
The strongest imperative of all malea and female animals –or vegetals– is to reproduce as much as possible. Those species which reproduce well tend to wipe out those who are less fertile.
In the case of males, maximal reproduction is achieved by maximizing intercourse. Males are available for reproduction 100% of the time; after sex with a partner they can go and look for another one –the more the better for the objective. Quantity is the name of the game. And men feel attracted to pretty and young women because these women visually send the crucial message: “I’m fertile”. Thus, women often mistankenly view men’s behaviour as being “pigs”.
A female, on the other hand, is not available for reproduction a large percentage of her lifetime, not only due to the menstrual cycle but mainly because after her goal is accomplished and she becomes pregnant, the woman will not be available for pregnancy for, say, a year. So to females, quality is the overriding consideration: they need to make sure that the few offsprings they can produce will survive.
For that to happen, females of higher species –who are tied to the nest, to caring the babies for the first months or years of life– require having a partner who could provide “food for the nest”. A good hunter among animals. In humans, that means having a partner who will surround the woman with the right environment to upbring her babies. I.e: money and dependability (will stay alongside the woman). Often handsome men transmit the message that they are players while uglier men look “more reliable”.
In my view –for whatever is worth– that’s why neither men are “pigs” nor women are “gold diggers”, even though both often behave in ways that seem to merit those epictets.

Patty Says:

I am attractive with a career and financial independence. However, I do find myself attracted to cute men who can bring something to the table. Why should I be interested in a attractive man, who is also a broke ass bum? I can take a less attractive or ugly man – if he is tall, has style, dresses well and treats me well. I can ignore that he is not Brad Pitt.
But if he is the short, toad like type, with no style / class- I cannot fake it. I am just not physically or mentally attracted to him….my suggestion, is that ugly men fix themselves up and learn how to be charming / suave In the same way an ugly woman would….I’m just saying….

TJ Milani Says:

Im an attractive guy. I have a different theory than everyone here. I go through life with one single rule:
I ALWAYS make sure that a woman approaches me first! why do i do this?
Well, first of all, if a woman is that interested in me, she will approach me. If not, then i maintain my freedom as a single guy. It works either way. The end.

jay says Says:

i see many women these days going after very ugly men, and that is very confusing to me. then again, they must have a very large bank account. women seem to go after guys with money, ugly or not. GOD FORBID, if a woman could like a guy for himself. now there just too many women today that are users, as well as losers.

PoppyMop Says:

Without sounding arrogant, I’m above average looking, have a good job and a MA degree. I’m told I’m funny and have a lot of friends. I’m never short of offers for dates.

I’m completely head over heels for a guy who is 10 years older than me, is quite poor, below average looking with bad skin, not a great dresser and lives in a bedsit. It took me a long time to convince him that I actually liked him because he found it so hard to believe. People give us weird looks when we are out and about, holding hands.

I’m not with him because I like being the better looking one, or anything to do with control. It’s obviously not the money either.

It’s his intelligence, humour and what I can only put down to pheromones or whatever it is that makes me ridiculously attracted to him. I have never had this level of attraction with anyone else.

Don’t question things or over analyse, just do what makes you happy.

I’d marry him tomorrow!

X

LR Says:

Alex Says:

LR you are wrong about pretty much everything, and you oversimplify constantly. The way you downplayed the reasons why an attractive man will date an unattractive woman is shameful, there are many more complex reasons why, you don’t understand all their relationships. A lot of attractive women date unattractive men because of money, you can’t discount that, there are many shallow women out there, there are also those who date for the reasons Curt pointed out, and also more complex reasons. You shouldn’t be so simpleminded. Also you said “behind every bitch is an asshole who made her that way” I hope you were kidding, because thats very sexist, some women need to start taking responsibility for their own faults. Maybe you’re one of them. This site is worthless…

Alex Says:

It’s hysterical when women like you tell men what they don’t know, and how they feel. There’s almost nothing more ignorant. Also Curt’s ideas about who approaches good looking woman and why is totally wrong and you’re wrong to agree. Most men will test the waters with a girl they find pretty, and find out more about them. Some guys will shy away and make assumptions, but it’s not just super pretty girls they do that with, its ALL girls. I saw a blog online once where a GIRL was explaining why guys actually liked blowjobs, she said it had to do with receiving a truly feminine love (no note that men give blowjobs too) and it had nothing to do with physical pleasure. Other than her, I’d say you’re probably the dumbest person I’ve found who tries to sum up things like this.

Absolutely Right Says:

i guess women are turned on by very ugly men nowadays, especially if they have a lot of money. the straight ones will go with ugly men, and the ones that are lesbians will certainly go with other women. either way, us good looking straight men will lose.

lisalee Says:

Someone once told me your boyfriend looks like a bat not the one you hit baseball with lol his my grand slam! Were like two fly’s on a wall lol.. We been together for 8 years his the best thing that ever happen to me. Its not all about looks its how beautiful you are inside and out god bless.