7 Reasons You Should Never Fry A Turkey

1. It can be insanely dangerous.

The combination of an open flame and oil are a recipe for disaster and we've seen way too many treacherous fails to endorse this idea. And if you don't take it from us, listen to William Shatner: "Blinded by my hunger, I ignored safety. I spat in the face of science."

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2. The least bit of moisture can cause a huge problem.

When turkeys aren't thawed properly or contain too much water, they'll spit and combust when making contact with hot oil.

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3. You have to cook it outside.

Thanksgiving and Christmas are the most popular times to deep fry birds, but they're also typically cold, rainy, snowy—never ideal weather for standing outside to man the deep fryer. Because risking an indoor fire is just not worth it. Ever.

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4. The oil is very temperamental.

Overheat the oil and you've got a fiery situation on your hands. You need to eye it very, very closely. What's more, you can't overfill the fryer with oil. If you do, the spillage will cause a dangerous fireball.

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4. It requires a lot of equipment.

Not only do you need the fryer, but a hook hanger and rod for slowly lowering and raising the turkey from the boiling oil. You'll also need a propane tank to fuel the fryer; gloves and other heat safety gear to protect your skin, hair, and clothes; and a fire extinguisher should any crazy ish go down.

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5. You need to watch it very, *VERY* carefully.

Oil can also start smoking and lead to a fire so you need to watch the fryer very carefully the entire time. That means to break while your bird if bubbling. Never leave that thing unattended.

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6. Cleanup is a pain.

You have to wait for your the oil to completely cool before you empty the fryer. From there, you can't pour it down the drain or you'll risk clogging your pipes. You have to pour it into empty metal coffee cans, then scrape down the sides of the fryer, then boil water and soap in it to really get it clean, and then rinse and dry it. Way too much work.

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7. It's not more moist or better tasting.

In a side-by-side comparison, editors at Serious Eats took a very in-depth look at both kinds of birds: roasted in the oven and fried. Their findings? That the fried bird was dryer and not as evenly cooked as the lower temp, longer cooked turkey. Sure the skin was crispy, but at what cost?