Sunday, April 29, 2007

I'm The Last Person Who Should Be Chaperoning The Prom

"Some of these dresses cost more then my car is worth." "What kind of car do you drive?" "A Saturn." "Well that's why right there." - Katy, the 8th grade science teacher they talked into chaperoning and myself.

"Don't touch it they're extensions and will come out." - Latania, the other 8th grade teacher they talked into working the prom.

"It doesn't matter, you're not getting laid tonight." - I have no idea who the girl was or what prompted it but I thought it was hilarious.

"You know this is a hotel." - Me to both of the 8th grade science teachers when they lead me by the arm on to the dance floor.

"I can't believe the DJ is throwing Mardi Gras beads to all the girls. You know what teenage girls usually have to do to get free beads?" - Me again to Latania.

"Ignore them, if you catch them doing something we'll have to punish them." - Advice from one of the other teachers to me.

"Mr SEEEEEEEEEEEE!" - About a dozen drunk students to me every time they saw me.

"I think they want us to unload the busses one by one and we're 5th in line so fuck it, it's your prom. Go have fun." Me to my busload of kids after the most uncomfortable ride ever. I'm not kidding, the bus stank of blue toilet water and then one of the electrical panels snapped out of the ceiling and hit a kid on the head half way there.

"Your cardigan sweater and softspoken nature makes every one think you're all prim and proper school teacher but the black eyeshadow leads me to believe that there is a pair of handcuffs somewhere in your bedroom." - Me to Katy, probably crossing a line somewhere.