We accepted an evite to a holiday party and attended. We did not bring a hostess gift. Can we send a thank-you card after the fact and that’s enough? Or do we have to send our hosts a gift?

–Anonymous, Newport, RI

Send a thank-you note when you know you won’t be reciprocating with a return invitation. The reciprocation for an invitation is a return invitation. Often that’s not possible. For instance, if you don’t entertain, or live too far away and our visiting home briefly, say, for the holidays.

A guest is never required to bring a gift to a party or send one post-party. You were invited because your host enjoys your company.

However, if you don’t bring a thoughtful token hostess gift, you would reciprocate with an email thank-you note pointing out your view of the highlights of their party (a person you met, the beautifully decorated house, the food, eggnog, etc.).

At the very least: An evite invitation is reciprocated with an email expressing gratitude; a paper invitation, is acknowledged with a handwritten note; a verbal invitation by phone or in person is reciprocated with a phone call thanking the person for having invited them.

Thank-you note card samples courtesy of The Printery at iprintery.com.

~Didi

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