~Domesticated MOMster~

Welcome to the blog of a certified domesticated momster...me(Trista). I blog about motherhood, marriage, and anything else that goes with a side of wine. So please grab a cup of coffee or a glass of your favorite poison and enjoy!

The Stereotypes Of SAHMs

I have been a stay at home mom now for over 5 years and I have learned quite a lot about what that means to the common person. In common I mean as those who have never been a stay at home mom. As much as I hate to admit it, I used to be one of the “common” folk and if you would have asked me back then what was the first thing that came to my mind when thinking about a stay at home mom, the shit from my mouth might have been as follows…

They get to sleep in. Let’s face it all babies and toddlers sleep well past the peak of dawn hours. They never need a thing and can relatively take care of themselves from the time they are born. Therefore leaving mom to wake when she feels rested and ready to bring on the day. No coffee needed for she got a full 12 hours of sleep.

They wear pajamas all day. With nothing to do and nowhere to go it’s only predictable that they must only wear pajamas. All the kids live in their pajamas too. It’s like one big pajama party!

They get to watch TV all day, everyday. All the kids are so well behaved and never take part in any form of shenanigans. Therefore, freeing up time for mom to pop her feet up and catch up on all her DVRed shows from the night before. She doesn’t have time to watch TV at night cause she is too busy sleeeeeping.

They play on the internet…when they aren’t busy watching TV. Without any interruption from the little people this allows mom to chat with friends on Facebook and work on her blog. The information highway is at her fingertips and she intends to use every undisturbed thought from start to finish.

How being a stay at home mom really plays out…

WTF is sleeping in? If I am lucky my kids might sleep until 7am. But that doesn’t mean that they have slept all night. Sometimes they wake in the night for whatever reason whether it be a monster in the closet or their tummy hurts. Often times all 3 of mine will wake at different intervals during the night and I have to tend to whatever is ailing them. Last night one of them had to go poop in the middle of the night. She decided to wake her sister so that they could both come in and wake me to inform me of the exciting event. This was sometime about 2am. I was woke again at 6am because same child had diarrhea. Nothing like waking up to that. It’s a glorious life.

Pajamas all day? Now I will admit to doing this on occasion. I justify it by cutting down on the laundry. Do you know how many clothes 3 toddlers can go through? But if it’s a school day or we have places to go then of course them and myself get dressed. Mind you dressed for me sometimes is sweat or yoga pants which yes I have been known to sleep in but I at least put on a clean pair to leave the house in.

TV? In the “spare” time that I do have I am usually doing something pertaining to blogging. I have so many shows DVRed that I have had to weed through and delete stuff because it’s almost reached 100% storage capacity. At night after I put the kids to bed I literally have to tape my eyes open to stay awake just so that I can get a couple hours to myself. This is usually when I take a bath or shower, and try to catch up on some reading. TV is always last on my list. And then when I do crawl into bed I can’t fall asleep…I am exhausted but my mind is making lists of everything I need to do the next day. And just as I close my eyes and drift off to dreamland there’s someone slapping me in the face saying, “Mommy! I….”

Internet? Yes I am on the internet throughout the day. Usually in the mornings when, soon, all 3 of my little monsters will be in school! MONDAY! But who’s counting the days?…….ME, I AM! Right now every train of thought is interrupted at least a dozen times by the asking of if it’s snack time yet!?!? And then as soon as I pick them up from school the chaos of my day begins. Lunch, cleaning at least a dozen messes, laundry, housework (the house isn’t self cleaning), breaking up battles, grocery shopping, making dinner, cleaning more messes, sports activities, baths, getting them ready for bed and the struggles that coincide with that. It’s a busy life…and although I might not CONSTANTLY be moving I am however immersed in taking care of this household. I made a choice to be a stay at home mom. And I have never regretted that choice…well maybe that one time when one of my littles decided to decorate everything with his poop…

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DomesticatedMomster

I am a mother of 5, a wife to 1, and a fully certified domesticated momster who likes to blog about motherhood, marriage, and anything else that pops into my crazy head all with a side of sarcasm and a glass of wine.
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I’ve been a stay at home mom for 17 years, and even though my kids are older (my youngest is 10), it doesn’t really get any easier. I am still up all night, but instead of monsters in closets it’s worrying about them being out with the car…who are they with, what are they doing? Instead of stomach aches, it’s broken hearts. I cook more often now, to accommodate work schedules. Teenagers have just as much laundry as toddlers because even if they had it on for 30 seconds and decided those jeans made their butt look big…into the dirty clothes it goes. The list goes on and on.

Being a mom is a forever job, and even with all the drama, it’s the best job in the world!

You still do your teenagers laundry? Are you a crazed mom? lol Someone shoot me if I am still doing their laundry when they are over the age of 10! But yes I do agree that I will be a mother for the rest of my life and I love that. I look forward to every stage of their lives. I have experienced the teenage stage as well…I have 2 stepsons (although one recently decided to go live with his mother after sneaking out of the house and getting caught and not wanting to deal with the punishment dealt…you can read about that here And yes the worrying never stops…just shifts gears.

I stopped doing their laundry for a while when I was working and going to school, but I needed a mental health break so now I do some of it…like what gets left in the washer and forgotten about or what I pick up off the bathroom floor with the little guys stuff. My kids are PIGS, the boys especially. My oldest (22) does his laundry like once a month and crams 30 t shirts in the wash all at once. My washer/dryer on on the second floor so the whole upstairs shakes!

It’s funny cause I really don’t care what I am running around in …I have never been much of a fashionista but I do care about what my kids look like…well at least when we first leave the house. What happens throughout the day to their clothes and hair is out of my control. 😀

Oh my husband too. We are always arguing who is more over worked and underpaid! I tell him parenting is not a job…my job is housework (which in his defense I sometimes slack on) but his “job” is still less laborious then housework and less mentally draining then 3 toddlers. But he would argue otherwise. 😀

My husband also sometimes forgets how draining it can be. I remind him that when he comes home from work, I’m still WORKING. It doesn’t stop until my child is in bed asleep, and yes, she doesn’t sleep through the night either. Sometimes he comments, “You went to the park.” Uh, yes, and I’m tired afterward from running around. Relaxing is lying on the grass, closing my eyes, and absorbing the sunshine. Parenting is a really hard job that is really under-appreciated and misunderstood in our society. When I was working full-time, I would have deemed a day in the park with my daughter relaxing. On the other hand, I’ve met several people who went to work to get a “break” from their children. They’re both hard, but I think parenting is more rewarding. : )

It’s funny how our ideas of “relaxation” become more limited as we become mothers. Relaxation used to be a resort at a beach when I was single…now it’s a bath with a glass of wine and no one knocking on the door….hell if I could just poop by myself would be great!!!

I totally agree with you, I would’ve said all those things about SAHMs too. Now my boys are older (10 and 6) I get a little more time to myself so I blog more. But any idea of blogging while they’re at home is quickly put away when I realise the little one would want to ‘help’. 🙂

I am NEVER bored…EVER! I can only dream of actually having a moment of boredom. I love your blog name BTW….I always tell people that I’m not a housewife…it’s either domesticated goddess or trophy wife 😀