LIVING (CHRISTMAS) LARGE

posted Dec 23, 2012, 1:55 PM by Fay Watson

LIVING
(CHRISTMAS) LARGE

By David A.
Watson, Ph.D.

For me,
no other time of the year brings back memories of childhood more than the
Christmas season. I come from a large
and remarkable family, one that really believes in gathering together for
Christmas. When I say big, I mean this family is LARGE-eight boys and five
girls, including my mom (the oldest of the 13 siblings). I’m pleased to report that from these 13 came
some 39 cousins, and now more than 30 (I’ve lost track, frankly) in the next
generation. Though I’m sure my parents
came to dread the occasion, I always looked forward with great anticipation to
going “over the river (the Embarras River-no kidding) and through the woods” to
our grandparents house, either on Christmas day, or as close to it as
possible. This constituted an all-day
affair, with cars parked up and down the block.

What
though, does Christmas mean, other than family get-togethers? To me, the holiday season is about sharing
what we have with others, and about demonstrating our concern for our fellow
man. I also believe it’s a time for
celebration, especially this year when our sense of peace and security has been
so shaken, by war and terror.

Let me first share with you a few
statistics relating to charitable giving here in the United States, courtesy of
JustGive.org. The average household
donates just over $1000 per year to charity (roughly $3 per day), or about 2 %
of income (its less in Texas). On the other hand, more than three quarters
of all giving comes from households. In
other words, people, not big corporations, do most of the donating. The wealthier classes, contribute, true, but
surprisingly, those in the very lowest socioeconomic grouping (i.e. people with
incomes of less than $10,000 per year) give to charity at the highest rate
(5.2%) (i.e. the U-shaped effect, sociologist call it). Please don’t forget those you normally
support at this time of year.

Giving
can mean something other than just contributing money, however. It can include donating something
considerably more valuable, namely your time.
I have written recently about visiting nursing homes with our Cub/Boy Scouts
during the Christmas holiday, and about how rewarding it was. If we agree that being with family and
friends is important to our sense of well-being during the holidays, then
imagine the heartbreak of outliving your friends or being abandoned by your
family (or even worse, both). Please
visit someone who is alone or incapacitated this year; it costs little, but its
value is huge (to both of you).

Charity
is of the utmost importance, but celebration is good for the soul as well, I
believe. Yes, Christmas is a religious
holiday, but its origins are much older even than Christianity. The ancients knew that the winter solstice
(the shortest day of the year) happens in late December, so they
celebrated. They rejoiced in the
knowledge that they had survived the coldest and briefest days of the year with
food enough to sustain them until another crop could be cultivated. So they warmed themselves, ate, and sang
songs surrounded by family. In some ways
we haven’t changed so very much, nor should we.

Getting back to the festivities
of my boyhood, my brothers and I could always count on the three F’s-food,
football, and free-for-alls with 50 other people (minimum—honest!) crammed into
a two-story frame house of probably not more than 1500 square feet. Though there was usually some sort of gift
exchange, it was for me anticlimactic, because by then the younger crowd would
have eaten, watched football on television, played football outside on the
vacant lot next door (tackle, of course, followed by the inevitable shoving
match), and eaten again. Meanwhile, the
television and the turkey would have worked their magic, knocking out the
uncles like a hard left hook, so that when we kids burst back inside, bruised
and bleeding, and with frosted noses they and our grandfather would awaken
grumpily and seriously in need of coffee (and pie).

I’ve been thinking about my giant
family even more this year, because the matriarch and patriarch of our big and
boisterous group are gone and the aunts, uncles are growing old (me too) this
year. Never again am I likely to
participate in such a warm (and crowded) family celebration. Sure, there were arguments and hidden
grudges, but there was also the one element I will never forget and fondly
remember for all my life-love. Merry
Christmas to all my readers (this especially includes you, Rue and Watson
clans!).