Humor

The SkyMall Catalog for Gamers

There's nothing like spending nine hours lodged between a screaming baby and a champion rib eater in a seat designed for a child's skeleton where the only things to pass your time are the movie "Marley & Me" and a colorful laminated placard illustrating the various ways you might die.

Oh wait, that's a lie. There's also that absurdly inane SkyMall catalog to skim through, which is great if you're in the mood to look at chairs that are more comfortable than the one you're currently in (and probably similarly priced). But aside from comfy seats, what the hell are us gamers gonna do with half this crap? Glow-in-the-dark lawn gnomes and pet doorbells are useless to us.

Don't get us wrong, we love to spend absurd amounts of cash on seemingly pointless items (it's the backbone of our entire hobby) but where's the SkyMall catalog that caters to us? If you guessed "just a mere inch or so beneath this writing" you win a one-way trip to Panama. So break out your credit cards and guzzle a few flasks, it's the SkyMall Catalog For Gamers.