Sunday, February 24, 2013

She Works Hard For The Money

So its official - this mama will soon to be heading back to work.... And I really don't want to. The fact that we have a mortgage ( or two, but don't even get me started on that ) aswell as business loans and a car to pay off necessitates my going back to work, but thankfully two days fulltime is enough to help cover the necessary bills.

Somehow I don't think I'll be as composed, or as glamorous, as this Aussie working mum....

I know I went back to work after having Flynn but I feel a bit differently this time. Last time was the same - I had to go to make a living, and yes I would miss my little guy, but I also was looking forward to having adult conversation again, and a chance to use my brain for something other than remembering nursery rhymes and feeding schedules. This time though, I'm not.... I dont really care for the work anymore ( though I still love my coworkers ) and I really don't want to have to deal with head office management again. 'Inept' is not quite the right word, but let's just say the way head office deals with their branch staff really gives me the Shitey McShites.

Plus, I'm really gonna miss my Tully. I remember being a bit nervous about leaving Flynn at daycare, and wondering what he was up to, but I don't recall 'missing ' him in a way that upset me. This time I'm already upset at the thought of leaving her, even though I'm lucky enough to have got her in to the same beautiful carer as Flynn, whom I trust like a family member. Maybe its because she will be a bit younger than Flynn was when I went back to work, or because she hasn't yet reached a few milestones ( such as first word, or crawling ) that I am sick at the thought not missing out on.

So I have seven weeks to cherish the alone time with my baby. Seven weeks to wrap my head around going back to a job I no longer want to do. And seven weeks for Tully get her crawl on and start babbling ' mum, mum, mum, mum ' so I don't feel like I've missed out and let her down.

2 comments:

Going back to work sucks balls! I really didn't want to go back after having Mia and I know its going to be even worse after this next one. If only we could win lotto. But then we'd actually have to buy a ticket I spose and thats just one more thing we can't afford!