Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I'm still here, I don't know too much other than I've had my medications upped. An improvement in the amount of chest pain I'm having. The medication is handling it, but without it, I'm not functioning too well. So a new beta blocker (slows down the heart pumping action, and keeps blood pressure down) and increased vessel expanders and I'm doing day to day things. I can't carry anything of much weight, but my energy level is still pretty good. I go back to my cardiologist the middle of June, and of course the stand-by option of heading to the emergency room if things take a change for the worse.

To look at me you wouldn't know that I'm having problems. It's always been this way. I don't like to be "down and out" about my health. I'm slowing down on my antique business, having left one store, so now I'm just in one place with several booths. Right now I'm focusing on selling what I have, cleaning out my stashes of "stuff" inside and in the garage, and simplifying life in general.

I love you all and I'm hoping to be back to this soon. I'm taking things day-by-day and I will post when the Holy Spirit gives me the "word" to share. Thank you for all your prayers, and good thoughts. I'm confident in God's healing power and great love, so I'm not in dispair or frightened for my life. Just waiting and listening and thankful that He's there.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I've been putting off this post for awhile, but I just need to let you know that I'm going to take a little time off from this blog. My posts have been fewer and fewer and that's because I've been having more physical issues with my heart. I'm at a place right now where I just want to "listen" to what God is saying to me. I have lots of things going on in my head and spirit, but I just want to "be quiet" while I'll be seeing what's happening with my health.

For those of you who don't know, (many of you do that have been with me for awhile) I have a hereditary type of Cardiovascular Disease. My dad had it, and my brother died at age 44. I had a triple bypass at the age of 49 when I was healthy, energetic, and strong. It didn't have anything to do with my diet, or exercise. I don't like talking about it because I don't want it to "define me".

Anyway, the point is that I've been feeling generally crummy, and I have a cardiologist appointment tomorrow. I'm hoping meds can take care of what I'm going through. But the one thing I do know is that I'm trusting God for the outcome.

I'll let you know what's going on, and in the between time I would appreciate your prayers so very much.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Hey Everyone! Several of you have asked about the book I am reading. It's been slow going, and I didn't want to endorse a book that I hadn't read yet, but I'm enough into it to feel comfortable sharing it with you.

The name is The Big Why by Walter Hallam. It is about his life and his questions after his young daughter was killed in a plane crash. She was only 17 or 18, and was in ministry and college. Such a painful and sensitive subject. He had several encounters with Jesus explaining to him the reasons these kind of things can happen. An untimely death of a child can be life shattering.

As I said, I'm taking my time, because there is a lot of real revelation and thought pondering statements that I am letting sink in. I think the evidence of a Holy Spirit inspired book, is that it not only covers the subject matter well, but speaks to our heart and spirit about other needs. Quite a few statements have given me alot to ponder and pray over. I may share some of with you soon.

(The above link takes you to his church website, but it can also be purchased on Amazon. com.)

Monday, May 9, 2011

It seems as if I've been somewhat deliquent, in that I haven't had a new post since before Easter. Maybe deliquent isn't the right word, but in reality, God has been leading me back to something that I haven't done for a while, and that is reading. "Reading" you may ask...? Since I started blogging I let slide something that I really enjoyed and it was a place where the Holy Spirit would really speak to me and that was in reading spiritual books.

I've taken a lot of heat for this next statement, but it's one I stand on. Not only because God asked me to do this, but I also know that it's best; at least best for me. And that is not reading secular books or fiction. I told God about 16 years ago that I knew I was spending more time reading books than I was with Him. Not only the time factor, but that whatever I was reading would literally "take me over". The characters became friends, and the subject matter and frame of reference of the author permeated my mind. It was addictive, plain and simple. Today, I'm not talking about choice of reading matierial, but about listening to what God is saying for your everyday life.

So...I've been reading "God Books" again. (My older daughter used to refer to my mom's religious book collection in that way) Funny, it was my husband who purchased this current book. He had heard this pastor speak on the radio, and was curious about the book. You'd have to know my husband to understand the rarity of this. He works 6 days a week most weeks. Usually 11 hour days. Reading isn't really on his agenda, so when this book arrived I realized it was going to be up to me to read it then share it with my hubbs.

Today I just want to share a thought that made me realize I needed to get back to this, and that was in the book of Ephesians, chapter 5, verse17:

"Don't be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is."

Pretty simple and straightforward, huh?

Do you ever feel the nudging of the Holy Spirit, many times over and over, yet you resist doing what He is asking? Maybe you don't even know what He might be asking, but you just resist the thought of finding out what it might be. Been there, done that.

You know, God isn't going to beg you to do anything. He comes to us and asks if we would be willing. He leaves it open for us to respond. You've heard the saying that The Holy Spirit is a "gentleman", and it's so true. He doesn't slap us upside the head, well, not usually, but sometimes He does goes "out of His way" to get our attention. He takes His time as a rule and waits for us. Something that has settled in to my spirit is just to ask the Father, "What is your will?" Today, tomorrow, long term... It doesn't have to be a huge deal, earth changing, or even life changing. Sometimes He just has a plan for us that we might not be seeking. I don't want to miss what God has for me because I'm "too busy" doing other things. I don't want to miss a word from Him, or a blessing, or even a task He has for me.

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