BIGGEST MISTAKES I'VE MADE LIVING IN THE UK

I'm living here for three months.

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I forgot to pack pants.

Legitimately not kidding. I left them folded on my bed. I bought one pair of black jeans and wore them everyday for three and a half weeks, until my real, USA pants arrived in the mail. The black jeans were from Primark, which is essentially a slightly shittier Old Navy.

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"Pants" means "underwear" here.

They say "trousers." I didn't know this, so when she took me to the underwear section, I was confused and self-conscious about seeming stupid and actually just grabbed a pair and said "cheers," because a buddy of mine informed me that that's how they say "thanks." I ended up not buying the underwear. Also, they were orange.

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The pants I bought didn't fit.

And I never broke them in.

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My real, USA pants were held up at the boarder and I had to pay a fee to get them.

My pants were seized by UK customs officers because it looked like I was going to resell them or something. I had to pay to get my pants back. They levied a pants tax on me. Wearing my own pants is a privilege, apparently.