‘Game of 72’ disappearances welcomed by parents

“No officer, it wasn’t a struggle with kidnappers. This is just the mess the little shit always leaves. Anyway, there’s no hurry to get him back; take your time.”

A supposed social media ‘game’ encouraging children to disappear for 72 hours, has been applauded by parents of absolute little shits.

Police in France warned the general public to be vigilant with their children, after a girl called Emma went missing for three days – which she later claimed was part of an online challange.

But though warnings have spread many parents have expressed their support for the ‘Game of 72’, even encouraging kids to participate.

Parent Mike Ock said “I have personally challenged all my kids to fuck off for 72 hours, using a Facbook alias modelled on Winona Ryder. She’s down with the youth of today isn’t she? Anyway, hopefully they’ll listen to Winny and leave me alone for a bit so I can sit in silence. Glorious silence.”

“Mother of two teenaged demonic beings, April Showercap, said “For those unfortunate souls who have spawned genuinely evil offspring this is literally a godsend. I have bought my kids sleeping bags, a state-of-the-art outdoor stove, and a book by Bear Grylls on how to break into supermarkets after hours and raid the meat counter.

“I have offered them a crossbow each as well, which my husband thinks is going too far, as they once tortured the cat with nothing more than a chopstick. But I just need them to go away. Now.”

However, even as parental excitement reaches fever-pitch, reports have come in that the ‘game’ is in fact a hoax, and that children are not disappearing after all.