This story isn’t as random as it may appear. David Hasselhoff does actually have something to promote – a Lifetime Christmas movie opposite Caroline Rhea (Aunt Hilda!) that airs this Saturday – which is why the Associated Press recently interviewed him. But peg or no peg, I welcome any time The Hoff gets a chance to talk about The Hoff, because it leads to gems like these – which I’ve ranked in order of ridiculosity.

4. On his dream TV project: “I’d love to bring back, more than anything, [something] kind of like Murder, She Wrote.”

3. On the characters that appeal to him: “[A] little tongue-and-cheek like Cary Grant, and [I’d like to] play my age but still know that secretly [the character] is livin’ hard, livin’ fast and lovin’ it, because that’s kind of where I’m at in my life.”

2. On his name’s evolution: “It’s kind of pathetic, because Hasselhoff has turned into The Hoff, and The Hoff is keeping Hasselhoff out of work, but The Hoff’s paying the bills, so I welcome The Hoff.”

1. On his appeal to kids today: “When Justin Bieber comes up and goes, ‘Hoff!’ and then Selena Gomez says, ‘It’s so weird he loves you,’ it’s great. It just means that you’re hip and it’s cool.”

Also, he’s into making a retro Knight Rider movie, because “if you don’t [make it retro], it’s not gonna be Knight Rider.” Also, I love you, David Hasselhoff.