Thursday, September 30, 2004
On this day:

Bush vs. Kerry Drinking Game

The first debate between the Presidential candidates will be held at 8 PM Central time tonight. What better way to celebrate this American tradition than with a drinking game?

Here are the rules:

Prior to the debate, a Drinkmaster shall be designated by a majority vote of players. The Drinkmaster shall then designate one other player as the Drinkermaster's Apprentice. The Drinkmaster may be replaced at any time following his or her appointment by a majority vote of participants. In the event that a new Drinkmaster is designated, he or she shall appoint then designate one other player as Drinkmaster's Apprentice.

The Drinkmaster's duties shall be: 1) to listen intently to the questions posed to each candidate, 2) to listen even more intently to the answers given by each candidate, 3) to consult with fellow players in the determination of the number of Drinking Points to be awarded, in accordance with the rules listed below, 4) to consult with the Drinkmaster's Apprentice in the event of any disputes, and 5) to make the final determination of the number of Drinking Points to be awarded.

Drinking Points are based on audience participation, candidate behavior and appearance, and overall results. One Drinking Point is equivalent to on "appropriately sized" sip of an alcoholic beverage. "Appropriateness" of size and "alcoholicness" of beverage shall be left to the discretion of the Drinkmaster, in consultation with the Drinkmaster's Apprentice and other players. Drinking Points shall be awarded as follows:

Audience Participation2 points - Significant applause from the audience while a question is being asked or a candidate response is being given, or during opening or closing statements (does not include introdution of candidates).

4 points - Boos are heard from the audience.

6 points - Moderator chastises audience.

8 points - A significant portion of the audience breaks out into chants (e.g. "U.S.A! U.S.A.!", "Four more years! Four more years!", "Get a life! Get a life!)

12 points - A heckler is escorted from the audience.

50 points - The audience spontaneously starts singing "Kum Ba Ya."

Candidate Behavior and Appearance - John F. Kerry1 point - John Kerry says "I" or "I'm."