Are You Content To Sit In Your Own Mess?

As a mom of twins, I change a lot of diapers, and often my twins are not about that diaper change life. The interesting thing is when one of the twins poops and I go to change their diaper I am met with one of the following:

A quick about face to run in the other direction

A child who is flailing around to resist getting the diaper changed

A child who decides to hide under the table to escape the diaper change

During this entire ordeal, I calmly explain, “it is just a quick time out and you will feel better once the poop is off of you.” However, despite my best mom convincing, calming voice, and desperate appeal to logic, I am met with greater resistance. They aren’t hearing any of it. As I stand there perplexed about why a child would rather keep playing while wearing a dirty diaper that could lead to diaper rash and just plain discomfort, I started thinking about whether or not resistance over diaper changes isn’t just limited to toddlers and if we, as adults, are also content to sit in our own mess. I wondered if that is what we are doing to God, and if we would rather sit in our own mess when God is trying to clean us up so we can be more comfortable or even get us out of the situations that are bad for us and could lead to other issues. Are these our own issues of diaper rashes and moments of discomfort?

If you don’t believe me, I challenge you to think about those moments where you are resisting God. What if God is not trying to take something from you (like playtime for a toddler), but instead He may be trying to sit you down for a quick timeout (the diaper change) so you can approach your situation with a fresh perspective and knowledge (the clean diaper)? However, unfortunately, instead of taking that time to willingly stop whatever it is that we are doing (playtime), we fight God until He forces us to move or He allows us to sit in our own poopy mess until we are so uncomfortable that we comply. When I think about it this way, it seems so much better to just comply. However, in reality, it can be challenging because we don’t have the full picture so sometimes it is hard to submit.

Back when I was in Corporate America, God told me that He wanted me at that particular company for no more than 5 years. However, I got comfortable with the money. What I was able to do with the income became far more important to me than what God was telling me to do. I was concerned that if I left, I would have to take a pay cut, have a longer drive, or that I wouldn’t enjoy the work. Disobedience isn’t without consequence. Hebrews 12:6 tells us, “For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” Eventually, storms started to come and I began dealing with workplace harassment. The job that I once loved became insanely uncomfortable (poopy diaper), but the money was good so I was unwilling to leave (give up a few minutes of play) to get into a more comfortable and better situation (the clean diaper). It wasn’t until the toxic environment began to impact my health (diaper rash) that I began to stop fighting (stopped the playtime), turn to God and ask for a change (a new diaper). Once I left to take another job I immediately felt lighter, happier, more full of joy, and healthier. Doesn’t this remind you of the child who gets a new diaper and is so excited to be dry and clean? Doesn’t the child who had just been resisting smile with happiness as they go to continue playing? The same is true for us.

Ladies, how many of you stayed in a toxic relationship or a relationship that wasn’t for you because you would rather have a man instead of being single? Did you put up with way more (the dirty diaper) than you should have or tolerated nonsense because you would rather stay than leave because of the fear of the unknown? Instead, you may have been flailing those arms around while God was trying to clean up that mess and give you something better. It may not even be a new relationship but instead, He is trying to give you peace because God’s peace is what we need (the clean diaper).

Just as we fail to understand why a child would rather keep playing and refuse a diaper change, I wonder if God looks at us the same way. I wonder if He wishes that we would stop resisting and creating uncomfortable situations that don’t have to exist or stay in them longer than we need to. I can speak from personal experience, that instead of complying with God’s directions to leave my job, I fought it and the stress from the job started to impact my health. You see, God was trying to move me into my place of more, but instead of going willingly, I caused myself greater discomfort and pain. Therefore, if you find yourself trapped in a poopy diaper then do one of the following 3 things:

Go To God In Prayer And Ask For His Direction

If you find yourself struggling to believe and trust His promises then be honest and be like the father in the Bible who asked God to help his unbelief.

Jesus said to him, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.” Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!”– Mark 9:23-35

Sometimes it’s hard to believe because we are human and we are used to other humans disappointing us and not keeping their word. It’s not true for God. He is the same always and doesn’t change. Hebrews 13:8 tells us, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” – Hebrews 13:8 (ESV)

Submit To The Lord

Stop fighting, flailing, and questioning God’s instructions. Take a lesson from Noah (click here to read the post) and just submit to God’s will. It’s for your good. Romans 8:28 (NIV) tells us, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” When I start to question God and think that my way is better, I have to take a hard look at my thoughts and then remember Isaiah 55:8-9 to remind myself that no one can outdo God.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9 (NIV)

You never know how He is working things out in the background. Little did I know that leaving my full-time job to take a temporary job would lead me to full-time entrepreneurship which allows me to be a work from home mom. I feel silly thinking about all of the resistance because what I was doing was blocking my blessing.

Praise Him For The Removal Of Poopy Diapers!

The Children of Israel obeyed God when he told them to leave captivity in Egypt and go to the Promised Land. Although they left Egypt, they didn’t have the right spirit. They were grumpy, complained all the time, and lacked gratitude. When God asks you to follow Him, He also wants you to follow Him with the right spirit. You can do this by praising Him even during the changing process because He removed the poopy diaper and cleaned off your bottom. Praise Him in advance for the dry diaper that will soon replace the poop covered one. Don’t be like the children of Israel who wandered the desert for 40 years when the trip was supposed to take 11 days because they couldn’t find gratitude and contentment in the journey to the Promised Land (the clean diaper.) Do you really want to go without a clean diaper that long? I’m sure that can cause some other issues!

The next time you find yourself sitting in your own mess, I challenge you to listen to God, submit to Him, and praise Him in advance. Don’t sit and chill in the poopy diaper, because it smells and it leads to unpleasant things.

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Aisha Taylor is a single mom of twins, personal financial coach, work from home entrepreneur, and #1 Amazon Best Selling Author of the book “5+5 FNPhenomenal Ways to Save $100 This Week Without Killing Your Lifestyle.” Aisha has been featured in ESSENCE, Jet Magazine, and Black Enterprise. She is also the Founder of FNPhenomenal (Frugal –n- Phenomenal), a movement designed to help single moms create a vision for their lives, craft a financial strategy to support that vision, and show them that phenomenal living is possible. It’s time for you to be Financially Phenomenal!

Meet Aisha

Hi, I'm Aisha and I'm a phenomenal, single mom of twins.

My life suddenly changed once I found out I was pregnant, and shortly thereafter realized that I was going to be a single mom. I couldn't believe that I was in this situation. However, this journey has been a total blessing.

On this journey, I realized that what happened to me is not unique, and I wanted to provide an online community for single moms. Therefore, I created FNPhenomenal to help single moms thrive financially and live phenomenally using Biblical principles to teach money management, self-care, and the importance of building a legacy for their family.