Lots of online stores will let customers write reviews for their products, but we like
GameStop.com the best. They will post almost anything
you write, regardless of how insanely wrong it is. Here are all our reviews that appear on
their site, and a few they didn't post:

Sega Soccer Slam (Cube)

Sega Soccer
Sega is known for there cutting edge soccer games and this one is no
different. I recomend buying this game based on Sega makes the best soccer
games. Buy 2!

Classically Soccerful!!!!
Do NOT listen to the other reviewers! They say the game is good, but
they do not go far enough! Do you remembers Sega's classic Soccerfest on
the Master System?? Well, that absolute classic is back with trilinear-mipmapping
and polygonal goodness! This is great for those of us who can't find a copy
of the original. Can you say multi-player??? Oh yeah! The Gamecube multitap
allows 3-on-3 soccer action. You will have much fun with this game. A great
update of one of the most fun soccer games of all time. I just hope Sega
brings us more Master System updates: Can you imagine a Gamecube version
of Woody Pop? Yeah baby, Yeah! Buy this game!

Final Fantasy 10 (PlayStation 2)

Final Funtasy
I particularly enjoy RPGs, because I'm not really good at those fast-paced
games that require skill and reflexes. I'm much better at beating games
that involve reading the text boxes to solve the intricate story. An RPGs
goodness is totally based on it's story, and Final Fantasy 10's story is
very good. It easily rivals the works of Shakespeare and Homer. The only
reason I don't give it a 5 is because they still make us fight battles!
I don't want to do any of that! I just want to read what happens next. Buy
this game based on it's cromulant story and GRAPHICS.

Spider-Man (Xbox)

I'm in Microsoft-Spider Heaven!
Do you like spiders? Do you like men? If the answer is yes then buy this
game! Spider-Man is the second greatest super-hero next to Kingpin. The
best part is Microsoft has lots of money and can pay developers for special
favors like 2 Bonus Levels Not On Other System!!! You definitly want to
get the Xbox version for the extra features they bought. Buy two! The game
is pretty good too.

Halo (Xbox)

Funtime Craziness - HALO STYLE
Let me tell you something. You like video games. You _really_ like video
games. You bought the Xbox, didn't you? DIDN'T YOU. Well, in any case,
this is your reward. The magnanimous HALO. I was surprised to find out
that this was a puzzle game. But it's fun, nonetheless. You, the player,
control a space marine (they aren't called exactly that in the game) and
line up a variety of icons (aliens, pulsars, etc.) to clear each level. What's
really fun is when you get to drive your oppoenents vehicles. SAWEET! My
only wish is that MS would stop advertising their products in their games.
I mean, c'mon. No cares about the latest features of MS Office XP. Buy this
game!

Grand Theft Auto 3 (PlayStation 2) <Not Posted>

Dude
Dude, this game is so good. What do you do in all games? You kill enemies,
bosses, and fighters. This game is all about that! It's so awesome that
when I showed it to my girlfriend she broke up with me! Whatever, Cindy
I don't need you as long as I have my PlayStation and this game I'm happy.
I can't believe I was going to merry her.

Jak and Daxter (PlayStation 2) <Not Posted>

Spanish Armada Possibly Errant in Dexterland! Woo!
Words cannot express the sheer jubilation contained in this frabjous
game. An incredible narrative illustrates the fantastical game worlds envisioned
by the most petulant developer on the planet: 989 studios. Yes. THEY DID
IT AGAIN: Tempest 2000, Splatterhouse, and now Jek and Daxter. Can words
express the overflowing excellence exuded by this game? Well, can you use
words to describe the falling of a sping rain on a newly cracked egg? Exactly.
Let me try. You, the Player, control Jek a delightful gnome with the hope
of saving the orphanage from the evil Transbubulator, an evil presence of
EXTREME EVIL. Then, without warning, the story changes and the included mini-games
will do nothing if not delight even the most jaded teapot. THE GRAPHICS
ARE BEST TYPE OF GRAPHICS GRAPHICALLY POSSIBLE. But I have yet to describe
the most infatuous part of the game. Yes, you know what I'm talking about:
the final bass (yes, it's a fish). This foe is the baddest, meanest, hardest,
and ugliest electronic foe you have EVER FACED! No JOKE! Trust me,I have
played many games. I don't have many friends. My only hope is that this
review will lead you to buy this game and enjoy the cromulant quality of
Jek and Dexter. PS: This game is much easier if you purcahse the optional
PS2 Jektroller control pad. In any case, BUY THIS GAME!

Mario Sunshine (Cube)

Stop Wario!
Mario and Luigi must, once again, team up with the nefarious Bowser to
put an end the Wario's evil ways once and for all. Mario must modify Luigi's
ghost-sucking backpack into a water cannon! You, the player, will get to
experience a 3D world like no other! Reserve this game today!

Wave Bird (Cube)

Wireless Funnerz
This is the best thing ever! For safety reasons alone it is worth buying
it. Dangerous controller cords and kids are not a good combonation!! Nintendo
says this controller works from realy far away. Nintendo says this controller
requires batteries. I says sounds good to me! Even though I am 35 years
old, The Wavebird is cool and will be a central part of all my video game
fun times and hopefully your fun times too!

Okage (PlayStation 2)

Much more than a game...
All of us live in a world of shadows. We repeat the same cycle: wake
up, go about our business, go to sleep. The people we interact with are
a reflection of the darkness within us and just as we get to the point
where we begin to understand the darkness, we fall into the ultimate shadow
from which we will not return. We frantically busy ourselves with activities
which we hope will prevent us from thinking of this cold fate. In any case,
Okage is truly a game you want to buy. You, the player, control Okage-san
as he needs to solve the mysterious happenings in his village (I don't want
to give a away the story). The graphics are great, although the optional
Okage screen overlay makes it easier to navigate through the dungeons.
Highly recommended. As you can tell, this game changed my life. Don't let
the shadows take hold of you. Buy this game! Buy two!

Resident Evil (Cube)

Boo!
You will scream in horror and delite at the goodness that is this game.
The graphics are good but not as great as Metal Gear's, which is why I only
give it a 4. Non the less, it is very scary yet good. I'm glad it's coming
to the GameCube, but Xbox fans should not feel left out as it is also being
ported to the Xbox. Buy this game regardless of which system you own cause
it's really great!

Eternal Darkness (Cube)

Eternal Fun Go Times!
Just like the extemporaneous Resident Evil, Eternal Darkness is sure
to deliver doleful gameplay based on our corrugated fears. For shame! This
is hardly what I would expect from a cromulant company like Nintendo. To
be honest I was quite surprised when I discovered this title is indeed a puzzle
game. Like I really want to line up gems to clear rows. However, it's sure
to be awesome, even though it is flawed, yet we should all buy it. Also buy
the optional control pad! Gamestop has it all!!!

Absotastically Swaf!
OH YEAH! Who says the Gamecube is for kids? Eternal Darkness proves that
Nintendo can make games for adults too!!!!!!111 This game explores the
meaning of death, a process all of us will go through. You get to control
one of 12 selectable senior citizens with a variety of illnesses. UNBELIEVEABLE!!!
Choose a retirement community, manage your investment funds, and wait for
the sweet release of death to arrive. Guess what??? If your relatives don't
come and visit, you experience a variety of INSANITY EFFECTS that are simply
AWESOME. Don't forget to buy the optional Gamecube Electric Dentures...
it makes the game much more realistic! BUY THIS GAME! Buy 2!

Modem (Cube)

Modem Funnerz
Boom! Just when you though your eyes couldn't believe it Nintendo sets
the price and date for the modem. Boom! This is what your going to need
to play all those online games online like Mario, Zelda, Metroid, Punch
Out, Pikmin, Bomberman 2, Shaq Fu, Halo, Space Harrier, Robotron, and whatever
else Nintendo throws at us. Boom! Don't forget you need to have phone service
to use this, so send a letter to your local phone company if you don't
have a phone, cause you know your going to want PSO when it comes out.
Boom! There's also BROADBAND, so buy that too...BOOM!

Wave Race (Cube)

Splash!
All I've got to say is this game is sweat!

Jedi Starfighter (Xbox) <Not Posted>

A short story for your enjoyment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, back in the day, me and a few friends decided to skip school hike
to Albertsville, about five miles away from the school playground. After
attendence was taken in homeroom, all twelve of us snuck out to start our
journey. It was me, Peter, Mike, Susan, John, Peter's brother, Elrond, Jason,
Fredrick, Kelly, Mike 2, and Blayzort. Let me tell you something: about half
way, Pete's brother started wavering back and forth while clutching his stomach.We
were in the middle of nowhere and Pete forgot to bring his brother's allergy
medication. So, we were forced to leave them behind. Eventually, we reached
Albertsville but when I turned around, EVERYONE WAS GONE! Buy this GAME!!!!! BUY TWO!!!!111

Phantasy Star Online (Cube)

Online Crazy Times
You and all your online budies will squeal like rats when you buy this
game. It's much more than a game. You can live out all your fantisies in
an online world! That's right! This game goes on the internet. I can't
wait to make the new magic user. If you see a force named Sephiroth say
hi! Or maybe Gohan. There's also a modem and keyboard and maybe a mouse.
In any case this game is sweat!

Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind (Xbox)

Spactecular!
Truly, the best game of all time!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pikmin (Cube)

Tasty
All I gots to says is that the Pikmin
are delicious. I ate them because Vishnu told me to. Buy it! Sweat!

Steel Battalion Bundle (Xbox)

What a deal!!! GRAB IT!!!!
Finally exactly what the doctor ordered. My friends have always made fun of
the fact that I play video games and am morbidly obese. THE GRAPHICS IN THIS
GAME LOOK AWESOME!! Now, they will just be able to bask in my coolness when
I show them this game. The controller alone will almost cover BOTH of my
thighs, hiding my three-cans-a-day ready-made cake frosting habit. CAPCOM
IS a SERIOUS DEVELOPER for SERIOUS gamers!! Like me! I can finally be cool!!!111

Bruce Lee: Quest of the Dragon (Xbox)

Made in Taiwan
Control Bruce Lee (played by Jason Scott Lee) and defeat your mortal
enemy Jackie Chan. The Opi Opi Bandits are at it again! This time they're
trying to bring Bruce Lee back from the dead. STOP THEM AT ALL COSTS!!!
Beat them down with a plethora of exciting weapons then jump in your flying
won ton and blast off to planet kung fu. It all leads to a battle to the
finish where if you're not careful then you may get stuck in the eye with
an AIDS-infected needle! Such is the power of the Xbox, and such is the
power of Bruce Lee! Buy this game! Buy two!!!

Pirates! (PlayStation 2)

Shibber Me Timber
Electronic Arts is known for there cutting edge puzzle games and this
one is no different. I recomend buying this if you enjoy puzzles and pirates.
The only thing that disapointed me was the lack of puzzles and pirates.
It's exciting on the higher difficulties, and I highly recomend it. Especially
with the Pirates! control pad.

Puzzletastic Funnerz!
Arrr Matey, 'tis looks like me treasure map! You will be delighted with
the amount of pirate-puzzle hijinks contained in this game. Big fun for everyone!
The gameplay is typical puzzle game fare (line up boats and parrots to clear
each level), but the real hook (ha ha) is the optional PS2 Swashbuckling
controller (highly recommended) that brings you into the action. As if that
wasn't enough, the included Pirates! Pirates! Pirates! feature is a documentary
about actual San Fuento Pirates. Fun and educational! Buy this game!