Taking a step to the side here, the other big (and strange) news from RAW was the mysterious tweet mishap that may have singled out JBL as the man behind the Vince McMahon parody account (that some insiders have described as eerily accurate) @CrankyVince. If you recall, @CrankyVince was even shut down once by the WWE when they were trying to sort out who the person behind the account was. Because the tweets often synced up exactly with Vince's whereabouts and temperament. As if someone backstage was doing them.

Well these two tweets got pushed out into the ether last night...

The @CrankyVince one was quickly deleted and then JBL went on the defense, saying he'd block anyone on Twitter who accused him of being someone he's not. (Though, as we know now, blocking doesn't prevent the blocked person from seeing your tweets. It just prevents them from @-messaging you).

There are certain discrepancies here (the JBL one is a tweet embed, the other is a screen grab from former WWE writer Seth Mates), namely the time (one looks to be from a different time zone), but this also isn't the first time that JBL's been accused of being ol' Cranks. Mister Saint Laurent of MLW radio is the guy who first brought it up a while back. Anyhow, I don't know what the truth is, but I do know that this slice of intrigue is better than Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit. It has, like, twice the Shadow and ALL THE RECRUIT. And if JBL is actually the one behind the subversively astute, internet-aware jokes of CV, then he may have finally lived up to his "Wrestling God" moniker.

All we need now are black helicopters to swoop down and nab JBL, spiriting him away as he reveals himself to be the real "Mr. Conspiracy Theory."

Now I know that they've already announced the theme of next season's American Horror Story (no, it's not the DMV), but if long-haired Hornswoggle doesn't appear on it in some shape or form, I'll be very disappointed. Because he already holds a permanent post in my future nightmares.

On Smackdown, Triple H came out and played a "character" who resented the WWE fans for steering the booking in the direction they wanted it to go in. Yup. Sure was a pretty convincing "character" he played there. Hating everyone for rejecting the WrestleMania plans that were in place. It amazes me how much the man's able to stretch, acting-wise.

All this, of course, comes alongside reports claiming that the "Occupy RAW" segment was meant to be a big "FU" to the fans in Chicago who thought they could hijack RAW. Whatever. I mean, I don't doubt that there was some vehemence there. And that Triple H is nowhere close to being above rubbing fans noses in the mess he thinks they made. But it didn't come off as an "FU" at all. If anything, it was a white flag surrender. No, the Chicago RAW didn't get "hijacked." But what the fans really did want to happen, happened. So the WWE can steal fan terminology like "hijack" and "Occupy RAW," but the end result is still them changing the booking. Sounds more like the segment was an "FU" from us.

Some new and old faces returned on TNA Impact this past week, with the organization now focusing on cheaper talent. The immensely talented Santana Garrett debuted as Brittany, eking out a quick win against Gail Kim - which then turned into a Gail/Tapa brawl. Angelina Love returned (to little fanfare, dead crowd was dead, I miss you, U.K.!) and tried to reunite with Velvet, and Bobby Lashley made his Impact TV debut, setting up another one-on-one match with EC3 - aka "Young, Supple Ethan."

Sam Shaw made his way to the ring with a crude, Christy Hemme mannequin - aka "WWE's Eva Marie" - and then lost to Anderson. Abyss, now with new garb, faced Samoa Joe, but EY interfered and nothing ultimately came of it. The biggest story however was Bully returning as a hero and putting Roode through a table.

She's so nervous about telling her parents that she got secretly married.

The biggest story to me though was the singles match debut of freakin' Willow. Wow. What a gift that was. Yes, bumbling, stumbling shrieking Willow. Because he's crazy, you see. WHY REBRAND? WHY? WHY DIDN'T SOMEONE, ANYONE, ON THE CHAIN SAY NO TO THIS?

Why make him be a guy who no one can describe? Who no one has a story for? Even Taz and Tenay aren't given anything to say about Willow. In fact, Taz just tripped up all his words (Taz be Tazzing) and finally landed on "I don't know...he's more intense...he's like...I'm searching for adjectives to explain it." And because it's Jeff Hardy, they still keep having to talk about how Jeff Hardy is now this "Willow thing." Who purposefully sounds like Cookie Puss. No talk of "Jeff losing the ladder match against Magnus must have somehow driven him over the edge." No story at all. Just Jeff's unbearable nü-metal lyrics made manifest.

Oh, but if you did happen to wonder why Willow brings an umbrella with him to the ring, it's so he can use it to crush people's nards.

Yup, the ol' parasol to the penis attack. It's like reliving my days on the French Riviera.

Sting, while not having signed his name on any dotted lines (that we know of), is still expected to join up with the WWE. During a recent Q&A show at the Camden Highlight Club in London, Sting answered a ton of questions while also revealing that...

He hasn't been watching TNA but he has been "purposefully" (his exact word) watching RAW

He's been doing research by watching HBK vs Undertaker I

The only person he wants for his final match is Undertaker

So we know Taker vs. Sting is a no-go this year. But I think we do expect Sting to pop up at 'Mania, right? Maybe? If not in person, then a teaser video? And then maybe something on the post-Mania RAW? Anyhow, with the Taker match now off the table I haven't been hyper-analyzing any of this all that much.

In cinema news (raises cigarette holder, waits for dashing leading man to light it), Daffney's landed a role in a movie that's shooting this summer. Let's see. It's an indie...western...comedy (as if there weren't enough already!) where she'll play the role of a badass chick named The Barracuda. And here's her sillouette!

And thank goodness it's only a shaded figure. Anything more and my eyes would get scorched out of my skull like at the end of Raiders. If only I spoke Hovitos.

Thank you to Wrap Up-readerite Tommy for squeezing in a "GDYC" sign onto the San Antone RAW proceedings last night...

Admittedly, I didn't catch it. But thankfully he got a reading off of...I dunno, Google Earth or something. If I expanded the picture out a bit more you'd see a freshly suicided clown.

Arnold Schwarzenegger and the True Blood werewolf will be guesting on RAW next week. But so is Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Machine! Double-booked guests! And one of those pairs is a great duo and the other is Schwarzenegger and Manganiello. Though I would give my second cousin's third nipple to see Cesaro give Arnold the Giant Swing.

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