October 29, 2008

A word of thanks

OK, before we go any further I should mind my manners. I have to express my deep gratitude to Karen Larson and Jerry Powlas, founders of Good Old Boat magazine, for hosting my website.

Of course, it’s not pure altruism that moves them. There is a faint chance that someone might visit this site, take leave of their senses, and order one of my books. In that case, Karen and Jerry stand to make a small commission. A very small commission, to tell the truth — just about the same as what I make from the sale of my books, as a matter of fact.

The people who make the real money from my books are the publishers and the retail sellers. I’m talking about the big money, the heavy spondoolicks if you know what I mean. Now I ask you, in all decency, is it fair? Is it right? I do all the work and they get all the … but no, my wife says I must get a grip on myself. Thank you, dear. We seem to have been down this road before. But let me assure you all that I am not resentful. Hell, no. Not really. I always foam at the mouth and grind my teeth like this.

Sorry, I got carried away there for a bit. What I actually wanted to say was that Karen and Jerry have come to be good friends of mine in the decade since they bravely started a new sailing magazine called Good Old Boat. Accordingly, they allow me to indulge in one of mankind’s greatest urges, one even greater than the urge to reproduce, and that is the urge to change other people’s writing.

They made me Good Old Boat’s copy editor and gave me full permission to cross other people’s crooked T’s and dot their naked I’s. It’s wonderful. And to crown it all, they pay me for doing it. It’s heaven. Thanks Karen. Thanks Jerry. I owe you.