Most Helpful Guy

80% of the time, getting back together with an ex is a BAD idea, because the same things that caused you to break up are likely still present. If you didn't like the ride the first time, why do it again?

The other 20% accounts for situations where there was a one-time event that screwed something up (loss of a parent, not getting into the college he wanted, having to be long distance, etc.) that has been completely resolved and put behind you.

So, yes, it can occasionally work, but only under certain circumstances, and the odds are still strongly against success.

Yes, but I'm not talking about relationships overall, but specifically relationships with ex's. And in most cases, relationships with ex's don't last very long at all, because you quickly remember why you broke up in the first place.

What Guys Said 5

Think of it like you're a behavioral psychologist. Where are you both now, in comparison with when you first met?

Have his issues been dealt with, and have yours?

Do you still have reservations, or were the reservations all his?

A friend of mine, not me, of course, was well into his thirties before he developed the maturity to honestly claim to have left adolescence behind. I came out of the womb a perfectly formed adult.

But I can imagine two people who met in their twenties, still having issues in their thirties. I mean, they do say 40 is the new 20, don't they. I hate "they", by the way. When I find them they will bleed.

They may be right, though. If he's still the same guy, and you don't sense some big sea change in yourself, just stay friends.

What Girls Said 5

it's a bad idea. I wouldn't get with my recent ex boyfriend. why? cause he told me he wasn't ready for a relationship...then he was seeing a girl ...haha. I doubt that lack of character is going to change. when he asked to be friends later on, I laughed.

Honestly it depends on how things ended. A lot of people say "no, once ex always an ex." Which in most cases yes, they should stay an ex. But tbh that expression always irritated me because to me it depends on two things how things ended, and if you've both changed. People do change and grow not all but some. If you've both changed and worked on yourselves then yes, I do believe you can have a relationship again.

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Anonymous

It would depend on the reason honestly. If it had anything to do with him being too into partying, wanting to hook up with other girls, cheating, just wanting to "be single and play around," or completely taking me for granted, then no, he gets no other chance. It shouldn't be okay for him to have his cake and eat it too. Discard me to play around and then get me back once he's ready. Should've thought about that before.