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5/29/2013

I have resorted back to the 30 Things, because I have no laptop to do my beauty photos. Wah.

9. List 10 people who have influenced you & describe how.

My mum.

My dad. You can read about them here, they're obvious influences in a person's life!

My nanny. She brought me up, & pretty much shaped my life.

My German teacher - She gave me such a love for German that I chose to study it. I cried at her note to me in my yearbook.

My school friends - They gave me a lot of confidence & helped me understand that it was okay to be me.

My college friends - I have 5 close friends in my class & can always talk to them. I'm not afraid to express myself in front of them at all.

My cousin Becky - We've grown up together & she's played a big part in my life. We influenced each other's music & stle a lot in our younger teens... Cringe.

Some of the younger kids I coach in rowing. They never give up & after one excruciating moment at a race last year (We won, the home judges gave first place to their own team) they vowed to work as hard as possible for the All Irelands. And they did.

Okay, 8 isn't 10, but it's close enough. And since some of my 'people' are a group of people, it's technically extra. Plus I'm getting quite cold in the college library, so I'd like to leave now.

5/22/2013

Okay, this is very much not one of my 30 Things, but I was getting a bit sick of talking about myself all the time, & missed blathering on about make up!

Since leaving college to come home for summer, I have also massively missed Topshop in St Stephen's Green (and it's only been a week!) So I decided to bring out one of my favourite highlighters. Crescent Moon is a pearly, champagne powder highlighter, with finely milled shimmer.

The packaging is cute, like all Topshop packaging - A sturdy white plastic case covered in hand-drawn stars. Some people may think it looks cheap, but I like it! It contains a nice 6.5g of product, & seeing as I've been using it for a good year now.. It will last forever.

You can see it on the left of my face, where the light hits it!

The colour is more pink-toned, but it's quite in the middle (a little bit silvery), so suits a range of skin tones. Pigmentation is strong, so you only need a light application - I apply to my cheeks using my NIMA Brush Dome Blush Brush, & use a Stila #9 All Over Blending Brush for my brow bone, cupid's bow, etc.

The wear time isn't amazing, but it lasts a standard day (about 10 hours).It's easy to re-apply anyway! My one issue is pricing - It's £10 in the UK, but more like €15 here. Which annoys me, but the product is still decent.

5/21/2013

Rowing. Most people do't think I'm sporty at all. But I've actually been playing a variety of sports since I was 3, until the bitchiness of teams comprising of teenage girls got to me. Enter rowing. Every year I curse it, but I couldn't not come back. I'm currently in bed with a burn in a delicate area (problem of the wrong underwear for a 3 hour row) & serious back pains, but I still can't wait for training. I cox, row, am a selector & PRO... I totally have no life.

Make-up! This is an obvious one, I obviously have a passion for make up. While I don't have a problem not wearing it, I love how it can transform someone & I get so excited playing with it. I fee more 'me' with my hair down, flicked eyeliner & bright lipstick.

I'm not sure what to call this, but I'm passionate about mental health. Two family members have committed suicide & I know several friends who have struggled with their mental health, and so have I. I want everyone to know that it's good to talk, & that your mental health is just as important as physical.

Music. I can't say I'm absolutely obsessed with it, but I do play guitar & sing. More than that though, I just love having my iPod with me to listen to on journeys, when I'm walking, in bed. Sometimes it's just easier to identify with song lyrics than with people. I'm not a music snob though, I realised the last time I was on the train that my camera's SD card had cheesy pop on it & quickly inserted my headphones to my phone.

Having fun. It may sound weird, but I'd rather look back on my life & appreciate the times I went to the beach instead of the library, or dyed my hair & went out, and played on the trampoline with my sisters, etc. Okay, work & college are important, but so is having free time!

5/20/2013

Honestly? I couldn't tell you. I used to have an image of me working as an amazing solicitor. Then I started studying law, & my mind couldn't have changed quicker. In the last five years or so, I've considered a ridiculous amount of careers - and when I say considered, I mean researched, inquired into them, checked out suitable education/paths.. I spent a lot of time looking into being a solicitor, working in PR, being a psychologist, a teacher, a beautician.. I even considered leaving college & just working in my current job full-time.

And now? There are two things sticking out in my mind. Number one is... I want to be a Garda. Yep, a job that faces a lot of hassle, is constantly in media for pay-cuts & bad treatment, and something that is very difficult to get into. But while I may never get rich doing it, I think I'd be good at it. I like working with people, and the thought of actually benefitting the public excites me. Specifically, I would like to work with young people/ victims of abuse. The one thing that could stop me is the vetting process - My eyesight is awful, & I've never been able to convert their requirements to my vision specs. Laser surgery might help, but this is a major obstacle.

ANd option number two isn't much different. Just like when I was 16, I still want to be a solicitor. A family solicitor, basically dealing in divorces, custody, etc - While working out what is best for the family or child in the case. So again, child focused. The obstacle to this is basically financial - The cost of becoming a solicitor is high, takes quite a while, and sadly it often relies on connections.

But hey, let's be honest - By fourth year, I might have decided to join the circus. Despite only being able to cartwheel when on a trampoline, I firmly believe that if you want something, you can work hard enough to get it

5/19/2013

The hardest thing I have ever faced is my nanny passing away. She is my mum's mum, and I lived with her for a year, then lived behind her house until I was six - When we moved a whole four minutes walk away. My nanny was basically a second mum to me and she is the person I love the most in the entire world. Which is why finding out that she had terminal cancer was so horrible. Seeing someone you love in so much pain is never easy, & I remember everything vividly.

My mum & aunt had stayed the night before, & my mum came home at 7:55 so I could get the bus at 8:05. But at 8:02 her phone rang & she ran out the door. I just knew. When she came home soon after, I locked myself in the bathroom. No-one actually said the words to me, I didn't want to hear. I remember texting my cousins - We all met at the bus stop & walked to school together, & they had already left, so I told them that I'd missed my bus. My mum sent my sisters to school, & I sat at home until I felt ready to go see her.

I hate the thought of that. I sat in my nanny's room, beside her bed, sobbing. And I remember looking at a candle on the bedside table & seeing it flicker vividly. Then I had to hold my mum in my arms when the funeral directors arrived, and again at the wake, and the funeral. I was the oldest, so it was down to me.

There are lots of things that I'd love to say but I don't really want to write any more. I have never spoken about this to any of my friends because it equals instant tears. I just feel incredibly lucky to have been loved by someone so special, and I hope my nanny is safe & happy.

5/17/2013

Okay, I was 16 four year ago. So a lot of advice people tend to aim at their 16 year old selves still applies to 20 year old me. But I'll try!

If you're going to dye your hair... Do something to your eyebrows.

16 means that you've just finished Transition Year in school. You weren't even sure whether to do it or not, but it changes you so much. You finally have the confidence to actually speak up & you've made brilliant friends - It's the first time you feel 100% happy.

Stop worrying. Seriously, you are not fat, your face is not spotty, your skin is not scarily pale, your chest is not too big, your hair is not horrible.. Etc. You'll still have some of these worries long after, but it's your body. If you're unhappy with something, either accept it or change it.

SMILE! Sweet Jesus, seriously. Okay, you hate your teeth. And yes, they are bad, but you get them fixed and it's one of the best decisions ever. But still, learn how to do a smile without showing your teeth, at least. (Just look at the above photo - You look so grumpy.)

Keep focused in school. You basically get by on your natural intelligence, which is all well & good, but it means when you go to college... You don't know how to study things you don't like. But keep up your habit of working throughout the year & not just cramming, because when you do need to cram.. Your work will pay off.

Don't hold grudges. Right now, you're very annoyed with people who still bring up things that happened years ago, and you've decided life is far too short to hold on to things. If something annoys it, say so. If you don't want to say so... It's not important enough to keep thinking about.

See your nanny as much as possible. You do try, but it's easy to let life get in the way. This is your last year with her, after she brought you up. It's going to be horrible to see her deteriorate, but stay with her. You will want all the memories possible.

Don't eat cereal near your laptop. Funnily enough, it takes spilling milk all over your laptop TWICE before you think maybe it's not a good idea.

You take up rowing this summer, and you're still doing it when you're older. You love it & you're massively involved with it (It takes over your summers but you don't resent it!) You finally have a sport that doesn't revolve around a group of bitchy girls getting what they want because of their parents & you make really good friends through it.

Mind yourself. Once you go to college, you're so worried about your friends & family & work & study that you forget about you. You will end up quite sick - And still won't tell anyone, in case you worry them. Twenty year old you still doesn't want to cause any one else a minute of worry, but if that's the way you're going to be, make sure you worry about yourself.

Just be happy. If you want to do something - Do it! Dye your hair pink, get piercings, flirt, stay up all night, go crazy - Right now, you have the time & energy to do anything. Use it. :)

Love your future self (who still needs to remember these things!)

xxx

It's really weird putting x's on a message to yourself.

This was also supposed to go up yesterday but I scheduled it wrong.. Oops!

5/15/2013

I have quite a trusting relationship with my parents, I guess. Because I'm the oldest (I'm 20; my next sister is 13), I'm pretty responsible and it's accepted that our house has 3 adults, 3 children! I've become a lot closer to my parents since I moved out for college. My parents are not emotional in the slightest, but the day I moved out, my mum & I cried.

Now, like I said she is not emotional, so she can say stuff that gets at me & she doesn't understand why I'm sensitive about it, but generally we can have light chats, or talk about serious things. We're polar opposites - She doesn't even use moisturiser, whereas I think it's safe to say I'm obsessed with beauty products, and she's a clean freak but I'm more relaxed. In fairness, we could probably just drift around the house not talking to one another for ages!

I will admit that I get on with my dad more, because we work in different branches of the same company so on the way to & from work, we can chat about what's happened, & we're both members of the same rowing club. But this means that when we fight, it's awful. We're both redheads so have hot tempers! Then we won't speak for a few days, until I go to college for the week, & when I come home again, it's okay.

One thing my parents have taught me though, is that it doesn't matter where you come from or what you're given - As long as you're going somewhere where you're happy & you appreciate everything. I've said before that my family are quite regular, & my parents both left school by the age of 16 to work, and have continued to work since then, for my sisters & I. When I hit 18, I became my own responsibility. They'd never throw me out & let me fend for myself if I was broke & unemployed, but they're also never going to pay my rent & throw a tenner my way to buy a lipstick!

I actually love my relations with my parents in that I might pay for the car tax, & then my mum will pay for my shopping that week, etc. I feel that they trust me & give me my freedom - They're not fans of my piercings/pink hair, etc but they'd never stop me... Just make fun of me!

So basically, like everyone I fight with my parents, but I always appreciate them. They're the biggest influence in my life & I hope to do them proud!

5/14/2013

My family dying. This is actually a recent thing - Obviously no-one wants their family to die, but I get flashes about it. Like, if my parents & sisters are travelling somewhere, I get an image of answering the phone to be told that their car has crashed & suddenly, I'm all alone. It's not rational & it's DEFINITELY not nice.

I'm terrified about moving to Germany this year. I joke about how weird it will be, or brush it of as 'only a year', but I'm afraid that I'll find it too hard, that I'll miss everyone, that I'll miss out on stuff going on at home... It only hit me last week that this is it, I am going. Scary!

Love. For reals. Put simply - If you love someone, it's a bazillion times worse if someone hurts you or gets hurt. I'm only even talking about friends & family, if you love & trust them, it's scary to thin of how much they could hurt you. But you have to hope they love you enough not to. Similarly, if you love someone, when something happens them, it's tough to watch. So I have a fear of love.

I probably come off as crazy, but they are three of my fears! What're yours? Chloe x

Hello!After the whole broken laptop saga, I took a little break because (a) I had no way of posting & (b) I was supposed to be studying. I'm still in the process of doing exams, so because reviews, etc might be low on the ground, I'm borrowing a post from Aoife. I wanted to do BEDM but it's now almost half way through May so I'll be doing 30 things instead. Starting tomorrow.. Brace yourselves. PS Let me know if you're doing BEDM or are going to do this series!

1. List 20 random facts about yourself.2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.3. Describe your relationship with your parents.4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?7. What is your dream job, and why?8. What are 5 passions you have?9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.10. Describe your most embarrasing moment.11. Describe 10 pet peeves you have.12. Describe a typical day in your current life.13. Describe 5 weaknesses you have.14. Describe 5 strengths you have.15. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?17. What is the thing you most wish you were great at?18. What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.21. If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you do with it first?22. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?23. List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them.24. Describe your family dynamic of your childhood vs. your family dynamic now.25. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?26. What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?27. What is your favorite part of your body and why?28. What is your love language?29. What do you think people misundertand most about you?30. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.