Tuesday, March 29, 2011

We've learned that these two precious girls do not flow with the grain of what is "normal;" they dig in and make a mark. Piercing deep and experiencing life, leaving a few splinters that wound the heart of their parents.

Wounds of wishing others saw their unique view of life.

Wounds of desiring life to be a little kinder to them.

Sitting last night beside Bitsy's bed while she flapped her hands, rocking back and forth into the wall, I wept. Not out of pity for her, nor the need to change her. I wept because I understood that I will never understand. I will make accommodations for her when the lights are too bright, when noises are too loud, when emotions are jumbled, when a certain texture frightens her and when her words can't be understood.

Yet, I can't understand with the mind that I was given. I can't process life the way that they do.

All that I can do is mother and thankfully, that's all they need from me.

As they pierce deep into the grain of life, they teach me.

They better me.

They have pierced my heart in a way that I would never want repaired. A nail of difference.

I often think children on the spectrum see things better, clearer. They feel with their whole bodies, they live with their whole hearts. They have an intuition so deap. How lucky your children are to have a mother like you

There is nothing I can say that hasn't been said already in the comments above. How blessed your children are to have you and vice versa. Your words are always so beautiful - "All that I can do is mother and thankfully, that's all they need from me." That's so very true and what a phenomenal mother you are. Hugs to you and your beautiful girls.

You are an amazing mother and express everything I feel most days. Our paths are different but a lot of the emotions are the same. I wish with every fiber in my being that I could give Colby back his abilities but I have learned so much and he has stretched my heart beyond anything I could ever have imagined. Stay strong mama you are amazing!