Five Wishes

Given that I am in a very grave condition and could no longer make rational and impartial decisions for my being, I am assigning my parents (my mama and papa) as my health care guardians. They have been very supportive and have never failed to shower me and my brothers unconditional love; they have been very patient in raising us as their children. They will be the soul persons to be approached when matters of life and death situation take place. My papa being a medical doctor himself, I believe, knows what is best to do for me. My mother, on the other hand who has always been very religious will have the courage to understand and accept whatever procedure they may do to me. In case that my parents are no longer with me until this unfaithful moment of my life, I want my brothers (JP and AJ) to take in my parents’ behalf. They have always taken good care of me as their “ate” and have always been protective of me. If, by this time I have already established a family of my own I want my husband – my partner in life who has loved and cherished me with all his heart, to already be my primary health care guardian but shall still consult things with my immediate family members. I know that entrusting my life to these people is not a mistake.

I am very particular with the medical procedures to be conducted on me. I do not want any procedure or operation to be executed if it is against my will, unless I am already in a condition mentioned above. I want it to be less painful as much as much as possible because I don’t want to be in pain for a long period of time. If in case that I am in PVS (Permanent Vegetative State) or in a coma, I shall allow intubation and if the line becomes flat I shall only be resuscitated once. If it fails they shall allow me to have my last breath without any medical assisted apparatus. When doctors decide that my condition is helpless or financial constrains have already been incurred on the side of my family, they shall not push it to the limit. Let the tube be removed by the persons I have assigned and let me live the natural way as long as my body can. My organs, if still vital, shall be donated. They shall be preserved and transferred with utmost care. My body shall not be subjected to experiments but I do not prohibit autopsy in case that my cause of death is unknown. I wish to be cremated and my urn be rested in a peaceful crematorium.

I never liked the smell of a hospital nor being confined in it. It gives me an eerie feeling. If doctors will permit my discharge, I want to rest at home (in the province preferably) and continue my treatment there. But if it will not hasten my recovery and if financially incapable to do so, then I will remain to be confined in the hospital provided that the sheets of my bed are not that of hospital property. I want my personal comforters to be spread as well as my pillows. I like balloons and fresh flowers to lighten up the room as long as I am there. The room shall also have a television set where I could watch movies of my choice. There must also be a lampshade at my side (I always wanted to have one at home) so that I can enjoy the books I love to read. Finally, I always want my parents to be at my side especially if medical procedures will be conducted.

I have always been thankful for the people around me – my family, my friends and all whom I love. I have been confined way back and I do not want people to pity me. I do not want to hear or see them very sad about my condition. I do not want to feel miserable. When they visit me see to it that they make me happy and laugh. I love pasalubong so make sure that they have one for me  I do not want to spend the dying days of my life gloomy so, as much as possible, avoid crying moments. I want to be treated like I’m still the healthy Samantha. I love laughing my heart out. And when I die, I like to have an AVP presentation that reminisce the happy and memorable scenes of my life (esp. that of my UP life).

I am a secretive and introvert (that’s according to myself). In fact, I am not that kind of person who open-up to people, even to my parents and closest friends, my sentiments. I keep matters to myself if I do not see a need to share it to others. Letting my loved ones know about my unhealthy condition will for sure be a burden and in case that I cannot muster the courage to tell them, I want my attending doctor to confide it with my parents at the time I deemed it proper. My condition shall be kept private. It shall only be discussed among the family. To my parents, I would like them to know that next to loving them I have always worked to make them proud of me as their daughter. I hope that before this untimely death I am now a successful lawyer - the profession which my family has been praying for me to become.

NOTE:All conditions shall only be pursued if it will not be a burden on the part of any of the persons stated above. Financial capabilities and constrains shall also be considered. Whatever care they may give I am sure it is the best that they can and I will, in perpetuity, be thankful for that. I want the people who I will leave behind to know that there is no greater blessing than to have them at my side during the greatest ordeal of my life.

Life is a journey and mine has already come to an end. They shall always live in my heart just like me in theirs.