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Jumping

I thought this title made sense when I typed it. But now, I am not sure if it actually is the proper title. But as I mentioned yesterday when I wrote, I doubt I am going to change things. I am committed at this point or need to be.

In roughly the past 10 years I seem to have issues with retaining my endocrinologist. I am not sure if I ever wrote about the fact that I am on another new endocrinologist. I have lost one to teaching opportunities in Pennsylvania. One for research studies in the California area. I lost my all time favorite a few years back when the practice I was going to dropped my insurance, and she left the practice and her new practice did not take my insurance either. So, I am now on my current one, but I think I may lose her as well. This time though I think it’s because of my own choice.

When my last endo, who I liked a lot as well left the practice for other things, I was assigned to my current Endo. In our first visit together, I thought that she might be worth the hour drive to Clifton for my periodic visits. After today, I am not so sure anymore. It’s not that she was bad. I just didn’t like the fit this time around. I chalked some of the awkwardness in our last meetup with the fact that we were both new to each other. This time not so much.

After being left waiting in the little room for about 30 minutes my doctor finally walks in. She’s not even sitting yet and is already rattling off things from my blood work. Your a1c was … which is different than last visits … Your cholesterol is great, it actually went down … things like this. Your thyroid numbers look good, it looks like the alternating doses is working for you. (no shit, it has been for years). Kidney function checks out, urine looks good. Realizing she didn’t mention Vitamin D, I guess my plan of telling people my doctor told me I had to go play outside worked.

Once we got through with that, we chatted a bit. I mean all health related, but it just felt awkward the entire time. My last doctor and I chatted. We talked technology, pumps, etc. she’s like your basal seems to be working your fasting glucose was 111. That was the entire technology discussion.

She decided that every 4 months worked well for me, since that’s what the old endo did. Asked if I needed any refills, I told her no. But also that I was coming up on year one of my pump in August and would probably need a form filled out for pump supplies. That was it.

I mean I shouldn’t care, since I more or less handle things my own and have a pretty good grasp of things. In the 4ish years I was with my last endo (I keep wanting to type ortho for some reason, but I digress), he’s helped me with one basal adjustment that I missed for random late night rises. Otherwise, we chatted for a few minutes. Took care of what we needed to do.

So now I am on the edge of the precipice. Do I stay or jump? Finding an good endocrinologist is not easy. When I got reassigned to my current location, I was willing to drive the 60ish minutes back to Clifton for my endo, because he felt worth it to me. Today while driving home, I am not so sure anymore. Do I jump or stay? This is a hard choice.