I really have zero support system and live alone. I wonder what will happen to me when I can no longer drive myself to doctor or shop for groceries or drugstore run. I rarely go out now and then it is a limited time unless a doctor visit. What does one do when they can no longer do this for themselves? I already hire someone occasionally to help do things around my house that requires some ladder work or heavy cleaning. It is so sad to be in the shape one is, all alone and really have not one other at you can depend on. What do you do?

I'm sorry but instead of having any advice I will be watching your thread for I am curious also. I suppose there is free ? help through local services, possibly for seniors, however for myself I am way out in a rural area so maybe not. I actually have a husband with me & I am only 56 ( he is 58) however he is getting more & more disabled also & we are more like 70 than 50's as far as all we can do. It is scary, se ems like just yesterday we did everything for ourselves & were helpling elderly family a bit ourselves, now here we are already. It frightens me to think about it. Dependency. Thank you for starting this thread, as I said I will be following it and wish you luck.

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We dance around a ring and suppose but the secret sits in the middle and knows. -Robert Frost

hi,
i live in the country and do most of my shopping online. even groceries. where i live safeway delivers. i have a pharmacy that delivers. we even have a bus that goes around taking elders and disabled to doctor appts. check your area for more info. also check online for companies that deliver. it's fun waiting for the deliveries too. like presents i forgot i bought myself. giggle. also check your local high school for students who want work credit and are heading into the medical field. often they work for free and get school credits or the pay is low, so perhaps more affordable.
find a doc who will work thru email with you if need be. many do now.
peace,
blue

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when faced with something you cannot control peace lies in self education and adaptation to the situation.

Any way you can get connected with a church? Some of them have 'household help' services for the elderly and/or disabled, or people who can drive you to appointments, and there's usually somebody you can talk to to help you out of a jam or even just so you don't feel so alone. Isolation is awful. How about neighbours? You don't need to be best friends to ask somebody else for some help. I hate to ask anybody for anything, but a few of our neighbours will ferry me if I need it. If worst comes to the worst, could you talk to a social worker? They should know what services are available in your area.

I live in a very small town and it is somewhat rural. I have always depended upon myself and tried to help others as I can. I have one close friend here but she no longer drives and is in poor health now too. We try to get out for lunch occasionally just to break the monotony of being isolated so much. I also visit her on occasion (just two blocks away) and can do so in my pjs if having a bad day. I know I already shop online for a number of necessary things, mail order meds, etc. but I dread going to grocery so much that I put it off to the very last minute... There is limited stores and the super store just wears me out so much I try to avoid that one. I do know that there is a bus here for when I may deem to give up driving. I don't like to venture far from home unless it is a doctor visit (over an hour away) as I feel I could get in trouble. I dread the day that I have to forgo my doctors that are in a big city and resort to the ones available locally. I do not know neighbors as they are always on the go. I have tried to engage, but they all seem either so busy or as in past experience want something from you. I am in no position to make loans or watch their kids. lol So I pretty much keep to myself.

There are several churches in the neighborhood but I cannot attend or participate there as health will not allow. I really have not been active now in many years. I moved here to be closer to one child, but I go weeks without hearing from her. I think once I could not be dependable to babysit on occasion, and her own health issues really strained our relationship. I really don't even call on her now and if I were hospitalized, I don't know I would even let any one know. So I try to just plug on as best I can. Seems like there would be some solution, but for now I just take it day by day.

My landlord's family has helped me at times, but I really hate to ask for assistance from them as they both work and are very involved in their church and family life. Just this week i had a computer geek here to work on computer and had to ask him to open some jars, now that is sad... Oh well, I will be looking for others' suggestions as to how to prepare for that day.

Thanks for your input..

The following 2 users give hugs of support to: goldyfmpam8024 (02-05-2013), treach76 (01-23-2013)

if we do not give others the opportunity to gift us with help we must ask ourselves why we fear asking for help. for me i felt it would make me seem weak. i was wrong. reaching out for help is a gift in itself. the chance for another to feel the joy of helping a fellow being. i was always the helper and doer. now i understand.
peace,
blue
p.s. there are many independant grocers who ship all over the country and even in alaska.

__________________
when faced with something you cannot control peace lies in self education and adaptation to the situation.

The Following User Says Thank You to bluelakelady For This Useful Post:goldyfm (01-24-2013)

The thing to remember is, nobody will ever know that you need help if you don't come out and ask them. What's the worst they can do? They can say no... which isn't anything personal, it just means that you need to try somebody else. You might be surprised at how they react to being needed. I HATE asking anybody for anything because I've always been the one doing all the giving, but sometimes I have to bite the bullet and just do it.

I'm 64 and like you, live alone and have no family or friends to rely on. I have severe COPD, so breathing is difficult. I live in an apartment and doing things on my own is hard. I purchased a metal cart on wheels. I put my garbage in it and then when I have two bags, I roll it out to the dumpster, I then sit on a bench, get my breath and come back home. Getting to my car, I have a walker on wheels, it has a basket, and a seat. I carry my oxygen in the basket, walk a little distance, sit down, rest, and then go a little further until I get to the car. Same thing coming back to the apartment. I buy very little at the store, and hang the bags from the handles on my walker. The heavy things I need to purchase, I buy online. Everything is delivered, and the empty box, I put in my metal cart, and roll it out with my garbage.

Cleaning the house, well that one I'm still working on. It's not clean, but that's the least of my worries.

You know what I worry about?...........going to bed at night, not feeling well at all, and wondering if I'm going to wake up. I wish there was a service I could call every morning, you know, by a certain time . That way, if I don't call them, then they know to call me. If I don't answer, then they call the police. I'm concerned about my cat and whose going to feed her when something happens to me. How do you handle that?

Last edited by Gizmo1248; 02-05-2013 at 11:05 AM.

The following user gives a hug of support to Gizmo1248:pam8024 (02-05-2013)

hi,
i noticed you are in florida. check around i bet there is a company that does exactly that. for a fee of course. bravo for you finding a way to still be independant and care enough to want someone to find your sweet kitty. do you have a neighbor who could check on you daily?
if i lived closer i would come help you both. on my good days, giggle.
peace,
blue

__________________
when faced with something you cannot control peace lies in self education and adaptation to the situation.

The Following User Says Thank You to bluelakelady For This Useful Post:Gizmo1248 (02-07-2013)