Wednesday, 27 September 2006

Sunday was a sad day for me because I had to sell my caravan for half of the price I paid for it. This was bad enough but it was also my Auntie Peggy's favourite place to be over the Summer months. She collapsed in it on the 3rd of September, 2 years ago, lay in a coma until she died on the 10th of September, then she was cremated on the 17th of September, which is also her Mum's ( my Grandma's birthday )

I felt as if I had sold her short and I always felt that she was with me in the caravan, which was comforting for me.I Feel as if I've left her behind.

I had a bit of a weep about it to Adrian ( my Hubby ) and he said to look at it as she would always be with me because the cash I got for the caravan, was going towards paying for my new kitchen.

I felt better for thinking that. Then, later the next night, I had things cooking in the oven, when I heard the oven door click open. I thought Adrian had walked in behind me to check the oven. When I turned round, there was no one there but the oven door was swinging open.It's a brand new Rangemaster cooker, so the oven latch is still very stiff to open yet.

Later that same night, I was on the phone to Steven, when the wall lights switch clicked and the wall lights went off. I shouted Adrian and he switched the wall light switch off and turned the main light on instead. I carried on talking to Steven for a minute or two then Adrian came back in and asked if I had switched the wall lights back on again and the main light off. I looked up and to my amazement, the wall lights WERE back on and the main light was switched off.

Adrian doesn't believe in ghosts but even HE was spooked by this

I loved my Auntie Peggy very very much and it wouldn't bother me if I did see her but I think it's VERY strange that these things happened the very same day that I had been talking about her.

Monday, 25 September 2006

Started the day with lovely warm but hazy sunshine. Adrian asked me if I wanted to visit Steve as I haven't seen him for a few days. I jumped at the chance because I know how much work we have in front of us, re vamping the kitchen , probably wont get the chance again for a while.

When we arrived outside Steve's house, the heavens opened with rain.It was TEEMING down. I tried to get out of the car on my side but there was a river of water running past me. We sat there for a few minutes, waiting for the chance to run inside but it didn't get any lighter. We made a mad dash for it and got absolutely DROWNED in the attempt.

We were both frozen and dripping wet by the time we finally ran into Steve's house. A quick towel rub and a warm cuppa later, we decided to record us singing together.

We sang a few songs and decided to call it a day as Adrian and I were in wet clothes.

Wednesday, 20 September 2006

We're a lovely bunch of people in J land. Or so I thought. As you know, I've not been here long but long enough to know that there are some really great people on here. I have made MANY friends and look forward to hearing from them ( you know who you are )

Most people on here have had bad things happen to them in life, I know I have. They just look forward to talking to friends, no strings attached and getting a load off their mind by sharing their worries and feelings and their joys and goodwill.

I see the same familiar names on my e mails everyday and would be devastated if I lost touch with them. They are like family to me now, even after such a short space of time I have been journalling.

I don't know exactly what's going on here but I do know that it's spoiling everything we have in J land. We just celebrated a third birthday here, only to have it marred by bad feeling and bitching.

If we wanted this type of behaviour, we could just go to the chatrooms, they're full of it.

I think this vivis thing should be knocked in the head because it's causing nothing but grief to everyone involved. Journalling isn't a competition, it's a way of expressing your feelings without fear of contradiction and mockery.

I just wish people would remember what we're all about and just enjoy.

Friday, 15 September 2006

Just wanted to let you all know that Steve fell apart on me this morning and I rang him a Doctor out to see him. The Doctor put him on Diasapam to calm him down. We had a shocking night, as I'm sure you're aware of if you read his last entry.

You all know that I,ve had my share of ups and downs but there's NOTHING so upsetting as hearing your own child crying in distress at the other end of the phone. It almost kills me to hear him.

He's taking time out from his journal just for a while. He needs to sort himself out first,can't keep going on the way he has been.

I'm very upset as i write this so I'm not saying too much more, except that he is in the very best hands he could be in. I love him so very much and am determined to help him through this. I f I just knew what was triggering things off.

Anyway, watch this space and I will let you all know how he's doing. You never know, he may pick himself up quicker than we expect.

Thank you all so very much for your support, he is a very lucky young man to have so many friends and admirer's.

Thursday, 14 September 2006

Had a better day today, not been so down in the dumps. Probably because Steve's a little better, so is my Mum and Adam and his new Wife, Emma are home early on Saturday morning. Can't wait to see them and watch the video footage of Malaysia.

Off to Steve's tomorrow morning, hopefully to do a little recording with him.

Not done much singing of late, because I've been so busy with the DIY .Really looking forward to doing it and spending time with Steve. We used to sing together every day when he lived at home. Hope we've seen the last of his attacks, what ever they are.

Just off to bed now, hope to be able to post a musical entry tomorrow, depending how it works out.

Wednesday, 13 September 2006

Had a really long day again today, Knocking the kitchen wall down is a really dusty, dirty job and I feel very dry and parched. Can't wait to get the house back to being tidy again, I hate to be upside down at home. There's stuff everywhere. Boxes and bags of kitchen items in the hallway and up the stairs, The dogs are having to sleep in the living room ( which I don't normally allow ) Things are just a mess at the moment. I will be really glad when this last wall is down, so that at least the messy part's over with.

I think the last couple of weeks have taken their toll and I feel a little down. This thing with Steven is getting really frustrating for him and me. Although I still feel that at the end of the day, it's going to be down to panic attacks, I know he's really worried about what it actually is. Just wish I could have the REAL Steven back, I miss him.

Adam and Emma will be home from their honeymoon in Malaysia on Saturday and I can't wait to see them both. Adam sent me a text today saying that he was very badly sunburnt so I'm hoping that he's okay. Just seem to be walking around holding my breath until he gets home safely.

My Mum is normally more fit and active than anyone I know for a seventy one year old but even she has had a rough week this week. She got a little scratch from her kitten six weeks ago and it's STILL not healed over yet. She's on strong antibiotics and has to have an antibiotic cream on her leg. She also has a nasty allergic reaction to what I think is down to Clinique perfume spray, so is using an antihystamin cream for that too. Hardly EVER known my Mum to be ill, so this is a biggy to me. Hopefully. she'll be better in a couple of days and she can get back to her usual self.

Well, I suppose I had best try at least to get some sleep, another busy day tomorrow. At least the last bit of that horrible wall will be down thank goodness. My new cooking range works a treat and it's actually a PLEASURE to cook on it, which is a miracle because I HATE cooking.

Off to my bed now and I hope tomorrow is a brighter day. Night night God bless all. x x x

Tuesday, 12 September 2006

It's been a beautiful day again today, so I thought I'd let Peggy have a wander round the back garden to get some fresh air and play with Buffy for a while.

They had a whale of a time, chasing each other round and round in circles, bless them.

I had to go inside for a minute to put some rubbish in the bin, ready for collection first thing in the morning, so I asked Adrian to keep an eye on her for me.

I was gone for literally a minute, when I saw Adrian rush over towards Buffy.Knew something was amiss.

I got back to the garden to find Peggy dripping wet fresh from the pond. Poor little thing looked like a drowned rat, bless her.Adrian said that Buffy ran to her aid, aaww bless!!

Wanted to laugh but felt really sorry for her. Adrian said she jumped out as quickly as she jumped in. Took her inside and gave her a shower and a stiff talking to.

Buffy did the same thing when she was a puppy,except that it was the middle of Winter and she came out of the water dripping with algae and teeth chattering like wildfire. She reminded me of the creature from the black lagoon. Lol !!!

Think we had better get a net to cover the pond until she gets a little bigger. Although I think the fish are probably bigger than her at the moment.

Saturday, 9 September 2006

Do you ever get one of those nights when you just can't settle off to sleep ?

I had one of those last night. Must have been almost two by the time I nodded off. I was awoken at four by a really piercing howling noise. It wasn't a cat, I know that. Think it must have been foxes again. I know there are lots prowling around here at night.

Just nodded back off, when the phone rang about six.

It was Steven again. He was in a state of tremor. He had to send for an ambulance and they took him straight to Hospital.

Just up and ready to go and see him. He's had another ECG, so I hope this means that they're giving him a THOROUGH check up.

Tuesday, 5 September 2006

Just to let know that Adrian and I took Steve to the hospital, only to be told we had wasted our time ( once again ) and would be better taking him to his GP.

We did take him and saw the very nice lady Doctor there, who told Steve that his chest infection has gone and his chest is clear again ( thank goodness )

She is referring him to a behavioural therapist and has arranged for a full blood test and urine test.

She also thinks that he may have a thyroid problem, which is possible as I have an underactive thyroid condition, along with ALL the girls in my Mum's side of the family ( not saying that Steve is a girl, lol !!) but you know what I mean.

Also , he could be enaemic, ( hope that's how to spell it ) this is another family trait on my Mother's side, along with having rhesus type blood.( We're so lucky )

All in all, Steve is being well looked after now , so hopefully, in time, he should start to feel better ( finger's crossed )

On a different note, I had an e mail from Adam and Emma honeymooning in Malaysia, saying that they LOVED Malaysia, it's FANTASTIC, and " cheap as chips "

So, assuming from that they are having a wonderful time.

Well, just off to bed, been yet another long, tiring day. Another one to follow tomorrow, as we have to go through to Nottingham to check on Adam's pets.

Saturday, 2 September 2006

Should have known what kind of a day it would be , the minute my hair got tangled in my hairdryer, so I had to cut my hair to release it.

Then, Steve rang to ask if his suit was at my house because he couldn't find it at his. This is 2 hours before we have to leave. I insisted that it wasn't at mine because I had the only suit in the house on a coat hanger, where it had been for 2 weeks and that was Adrian's. OR SO I THOUGHT.

Turns out, it WAS Steven's after all, this is after Adrian and I had been out 2 days before, to buy a new shirt to go with it. I insisted Adrian's suit was black but Adrian insisted his suit was blue. Steven's is the blue suit apparantly, Adrian's is black. So, we were both right. Adrian had gone by the colour of the suit hanging on his wardrobe for the past 2 weeks, I went on memory from his Niece's wedding last year, which was when he bought the suit.

I rushed around like a mad woman, to make sure I didn't forget ANYTHING. Had to be on time because Emma rang me to ask if I could go to her house first, to sew some diamante crystals onto her veil.

I made arrangements with my Nephew, Ben, to come and check on my animals from time to time and make sure they were all okay, especially little Peggy. I left him a list of things NOT to do and that was fine.

We finally picked steven and Anthony up and were doing well for time. Anthony did a great job on my hair and things were going great.

THEN, I remembered I had forgotten my bows for our car. I really wanted ribbons on our car because I was the Groom's Mother and I wanted to feel special. I was GUTTED.

THEN, I realised I had forgotten the directions to the Registry Office AND the reception venue.

We ended up having to ring Adam for directions. I felt so stupid. Finally found the Registry Office and had to park up a fair distance away because there were no spaces nearby. Adrian is disabled, so I wasn't too happy about it.

It was cold, very windy and teeming with rain, I was FROZEN.

Everything went well at the ceremony despite the fact thar Emma was almost half an hour late because of a broken down car blocking the road to town.

I was asked to do a reading for the ceremony, which I did brilliantly,if I say so myself.

THEN realised Adrian had forgotten to take his medication for the day. OH NO !!!

Came out of the Registry office, had photo's taken outside and headed back to our car, only to find that we had a parking ticket. DOH !!

We got lost on the way to the reception and were the last to arrive.

All went well from then on , except that Steven got very drunk and we had to keep stopping on the way home, for him to be sick, bless !!

We arrived home, only to find that the bedroom door had been left open and I had to start changing the bedding.

All in all, a BRILLIANT DAY lol !! I am now the proud owner of a BRAND NEW DAUGHTER IN LAW.

Thank goodness it's over. pics to be posted later today ( all being well )

About Me

I am a 51 year old Wife and Mother of two, Steven (25), Adam (29).
I am the eldest Daughter of seven children, having two older Brothers, two younger Brothers and two younger Sisters.
I still have my parents (Thank God!).
I am an Auntie to millions and Great Auntie to almost as many!