Advice Please! !!

So let me start from the beginning me and my bf have been together for a year on october 23 but known eachother for about a year n 6 months as soon as we started dating i got pregnant while i was 4 months females started writing me on facebook and texting me about them being together ( still dont know if its true or not) but i talked to him and decided that we needed time apart but as my pregnancy went on i started to hate him we only talked when it came to are son and never saw eachother....6 months later are son was born n i feel n love with him again so we got back in the beginning he opened up about his past and opened up period a lil and now it has stoped totally i try to tell him that we will stay n this same place if we dont have any communication and he says leave it alone but i cant i want to be with this man more then anything in life and cant see myself with out him again but if we keep not having communication i dont think i can do this anymore can you guys give me any advice on how to help him open up

So let me start from the beginning me and my bf have been together for a year on october 23 but known eachother for about a year n 6 months as soon as we started dating i got pregnant while i was 4 months females started writing me on facebook and texting me about them being together ( still dont know if its true or not) but i talked to him and decided that we needed time apart but as my pregnancy went on i started to hate him we only talked when it came to are son and never saw eachother....6 months later are son was born n i feel n love with him again so we got back in the beginning he opened up about his past and opened up period a lil and now it has stoped totally i try to tell him that we will stay n this same place if we dont have any communication and he says leave it alone but i cant i want to be with this man more then anything in life and cant see myself with out him again but if we keep not having communication i dont think i can do this anymore can you guys give me any advice on how to help him open up

Well in my experience you canâ€™t really get anyone to open up to you unless they are ready. You also have to be willing to share and open up to him also. If he opens up a little what kind of reaction do you have? Even when it is something you donâ€™t like or really donâ€™t want to hear? My DB and I were not in a commited relationship when I got pregnant and went through the same thing. For most of my pregnancy I didnâ€™t really see him. He would show up for appointments but thatâ€™s about it. I would hear from around that he was seeing girls, not mentioning us and just acting a fool. I came to terms with it and left it alone. By my 7th month he started coming around more. Just seemed like he cared a little more. After the baby was born he decided that he wanted us to be a family and I agreed to give him another shot. I told him about all the things that I had heard about him and I also told him what I expected of him. During this time he told me what was true what was false. I took it all in stride ( on the outside, inside I was heartbroken) I told him what I had to say about the truths he told me, no yelling or screaming or judging. I told him that all that was now in the past and I would let it go. As far as Iâ€™m concerned we started fresh when we decided to be a family so I told him and myself that I would not bring the past up again. And I donâ€™t. Iâ€™ve noticed him talking to me more about what goes on in his life. I did make it clear that I nor my LO's would put up with him acting like he did or we are gone. Iâ€™m sorry if this is long and I think I kind of got off topic but mainly just give him time, donâ€™t push and keep your reactions neutral.

Well in my experience you canâ€™t really get anyone to open up to you unless they are ready. You also have to be willing to share and open up to him also. If he opens up a little what kind of reaction do you have? Even when it is something you donâ€™t like or really donâ€™t want to hear? My DB and I were not in a commited relationship when I got pregnant and went through the same thing. For most of my pregnancy I didnâ€™t really see him. He would show up for appointments but thatâ€™s about it. I would hear from around that he was seeing girls, not mentioning us and just acting a fool. I came to terms with it and left it alone. By my 7th month he started coming around more. Just seemed like he cared a little more. After the baby was born he decided that he wanted us to be a family and I agreed to give him another shot. I told him about all the things that I had heard about him and I also told him what I expected of him. During this time he told me what was true what was false. I took it all in stride ( on the outside, inside I was heartbroken) I told him what I had to say about the truths he told me, no yelling or screaming or judging. I told him that all that was now in the past and I would let it go. As far as Iâ€™m concerned we started fresh when we decided to be a family so I told him and myself that I would not bring the past up again. And I donâ€™t. Iâ€™ve noticed him talking to me more about what goes on in his life. I did make it clear that I nor my LO's would put up with him acting like he did or we are gone. Iâ€™m sorry if this is long and I think I kind of got off topic but mainly just give him time, donâ€™t push and keep your reactions neutral.

thats the thing i have opened up to him from day 1 because we needed to get to know each other with us having a baby and you guys do have feelings just dont show them to no one but your self and how long will it take him to open up to me

thats the thing i have opened up to him from day 1 because we needed to get to know each other with us having a baby and you guys do have feelings just dont show them to no one but your self and how long will it take him to open up to me

You open up because that's what women do, spill their guts. Guys are not wired that way. Sometimes it takes years to know everything about your husband much less a boyfriend who is guarded. Try not to pressure, if he wants to tell you he will.Â

Agree with Newdad.Â

You open up because that's what women do, spill their guts. Guys are not wired that way. Sometimes it takes years to know everything about your husband much less a boyfriend who is guarded. Try not to pressure, if he wants to tell you he will.Â

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