So yesterday, I logged into my old livejournal and decided, out of boredom, to read some early entries.

Jeebus cripes.

I had absolutely no idea how annoying I was back then. Well, I was the typical angsty, depressed, suicidal teen with so much drama. I actually had quite an interesting life, spent too much money on unnecessary things, was a very spoiled brat who kept whining and swearing and invented many stupid words. The current me feels like I want to bash the old teen me in the head.

It’s fascinating to try to remember everything.

Luckily, everything is private and not published publicly. Can’t say the same with this blog. I have so many annoying posts from years ago that I read a few days back. I’ve had this blog since 2006. A lot of things I wrote back then were extremely personal because this domain was meant to be a private blog. Blogging has changed a lot over the years and it’s no longer just a platform for random angsty rants like it used to be. I remember how I got into massive trouble at college because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut and bitched about people openly in this blog. What a huge, retarded mistake. I think it’s time for me to go back and make all those stupid and annoying posts ‘private’.

Since I have YEARS of entries to go through, I’m sure it’ll take ages. I’ll keep general posts public of course but whatever I no longer want published for the public eyes (in other words, my private life) will be hidden. I can’t delete them though because I love reading old posts and reminisce old time. But I think now it’s time that I ‘erase‘ my past from the internet and move on. I’m trying to do the same with facebook but it’s much harder. Obviously deactivating or deleting my profile is not an option. I’ve already ‘privatized’ majority of uploaded pictures though.

One thing I find upsetting when reading my old livejournal entries is the fact that I’m no longer close to my online friends as I used to be. I don’t even talk to any of them anymore, except maybe one or two once in a blue moon. I’m just not good at keeping friends I guess. Many have even deleted me from their friends list on social media sites, facebook especially. I guess I’m either still annoying, not interesting enough for them to continue the friendship, or just no longer want to be associated with me. Oh well.

Then I realized, I read yesterday that someone managed to track Sufiah Yusof where she has agreed to do an exclusive interview. No wonder! The interview was shown on Nona yesterday which I didn’t know about and missed. Thank you to the existence of Youtube and the kind soul that recorded the interview and posted it on Youtube, you can watch her interview if you’ve missed it.

Sufiah Yusof’s life story is mostly tragic. For a math genius that spiraled into depression and chose the wrong path in life, then to get all the media attention for it is ridiculous. I don’t think anyone should harass someone’s life just like Britain’s media did so they could get a story. Very selfish thing to do, but then again, since when the media ever have mercy on someone else’s privacy as long as they could get a story to sell?

I’m happy for her current life and I’m surprised that she agreed to do the interview. I don’t think us as the public could ever understand what she’s been going through and all the pressure that surrounds her since she was 13. We didn’t have that kind of life – forced to grow up and live an adult life at such a young age. When I was 13, I was struggling with an awkward life, high school, low self-esteem and acne! We have no right to judge her, bash her or to even give opinion about her life choices. I’m glad she’s no longer into prostitution, and I hope she’s really doing okay, not just pretending.

Just leave her alone, and let her move on with her life. People who are holier-than-thou, who keeps commenting how she’s still not wearing a hijab and all that shit, please, go @#^$ yourself. You have no right to judge people. Nobody likes that, and I’m sure you wouldn’t like it if people starts judging your life either.

Sufiah Yusof, I wish you the best in life. We’re all adults now. Let’s not act like immature teenagers. We all have one or many dark past that we want to forget. She made a mistake by going into prostitution/escort service, she’s learned from her mistake, so just move on.

And I also hope to see she’s reunited with her family, even if only for a few hours, her family especially her mother deserve to see her.

I know previously I said I would write about my non-stop chain of bad lucks and make an entire new post about it. But now I’m too lazy. Thing is, blogging is not as exciting as it used to be. I used to write about my daily life for fun, and people I know would stop by and read and comment. Now blogging is different and my life is not interesting anymore and I’ve been so lazy and tired I just end up lying on my bed, watching youtube or netflix then sleep.

The bad luck hasn’t stopped yet. Recently my Myvi car butt-kissed another car because I lost focus for 0.5 second. Luckily there was no damage and the lady wasn’t Kiki with the steering lock although she seemed very pissed. Then my cat BamBam got sick. I noticed he had blood in his urine. I don’t want to repeat the same mistake with Puteh, thinking everything’s gonna be okay until it’s too late. Luckily I had money saved up which was supposed to be to buy stock for my business. Hopefully the RM100 I spent was worth it. Another bad luck, the specialist vet was closed for days… so I had to go to a different vet.

I had so many bad luck last month that I can’t even remember now.. well don’t even wanna remember it. Not a single day went by without having a very unlucky day. Although there was one major good thing that happened – I got my BR1M! Unexpectedly!

I had applied for BR1M since 2 years ago. The first year (when they started giving to single, unmarried person) I didn’t apply. Then the 2nd year I applied but got rejected because my name was in the database under my mom’s. So for 3rd year I applied and got rejected again because I own more than 1 car. Wtf. Luckily for this time, I could just update my info online and I did.. surprisingly when I checked my account, there it was!

I wish it was a monthly thing, not just once a year thing, especially to someone unemployed like me.

Gosh I can’t believe it’s February already. Time fly by so quickly when you just lie in bed and do nothing. Well I’m gonna go read a book and watch Netflix now. And I really miss my iMac. My laptop is lagging badly.

I need to be quick with this entry. I currently have no electricity and my laptop is running on broken battery, which will last for about less than 15 minutes or so. Yes, I need a new battery but what’s the point? I don’t use the battery a lot and it’s always connected to the AC adapter anyway.

Are you looking for table linens? There are some table linens on clearance that you can check out. I’ve written about this company before so I’m not gonna repeat another entry…I’d search for that entry but like I said, I’m on limited battery right now.

That’s just too darn cute. I’ve never seen that video before which is strange since it’s a viral video. I wish my cat would do something like that. I remember when I was 7 or 8, and this music school came to my school and told us to go to their place for a demo, so I asked my mom and it was so much fun. I wanted to play the organ. Mom suggested piano instead. It was okay at first. Then it got weird. Then it was traumatizing.