The gauge on the capital’s flesh-ometer has shot up. With winter’s rude breath finally being usurped by spring’s flirty kisses, a whole load of London that has long been buried under thick knits and 40 Denier is suddenly on show again. Welcome to an almost forgotten land — one where flip-flops are deemed Underground-appropriate attire, where lunchtime dining can be al fresco not al desko and half-naked runners show off their abs.

There’s something strangely British about pretending we’re in Ibiza when the thermometer hits a balmy 11C — small wonder that Nick Clegg mentioned our habit of stripping off at the first sight of sun in his love letter to the nation. But unfortunately we’re not universally skilled at coping with the capricious spring weather. Just think of those days in the park that end with someone scrubbing encrusted mud off suede boots with a toothbrush or the many picnics and barbecues where rain stops play. So here’s how to enjoy the return of the sun this spring:

Do dress for the office

The sun is no excuse to forget the dress code. One of the worst sartorial sins in the workplace is swapping pumps and brogues for flip-flops, the footwear that gives your toes a wedgie. Most colleagues won’t want to see your Frodo feet (and you should avoid those who do). More generally, if you work in an office where employees are supposed to look smart, make sure standards are maintained. Best avoid sloppy T-shirts and clothes that women’s mags would call “festival wear” (anything that could be classed as “very Sienna Miller, the boho years”).

Don’t canoodle in public

Hotter weather apparently means the pheromones flow. London’s parks become a hotbed of licentiousness where people old enough to know better act like dogs on heat. If you’re past adolescence and so have any other place to go, there’s little excuse for pashing in a park. It’s not some kind of edgy performance art, and you should know by now that your punishment will be a dry-cleaning bill to remove all those grass stains. Please just get a room.

Do invest in a summer coat

In less capricious climes a “summer coat” is an oxymoron. In fact, I remember the look of horror when I told an American student visiting London from LA that this was the investment she’d be most thankful for in her year here. But since there are few cities where Mark Twain’s line about seeing 136 different kinds of weather in 24 hours seems to apply more than London, there is no more useful garment here. Of course, you’ll put it on in the wind, only for the sun to demand you take it off two minutes later, only for the wind to make you put it on again — ad infinitum.

Don’t perve

Starved of flesh for so long, spring seems to be high season for cat-callers. But there is no licence to lech or harass. This message is particularly intended for the men who stand on street corners and say “hey sexy” to every passing woman. Spring skin is no excuse to treat others like pieces of meat.

Do be scent-aware

Eau de armpit is the top perfume on public transport in hotter weather. Unfortunately, as anybody under 5ft 6in will know, many of us are at the exact height to inhale it to full effect in a crushed Tube carriage. In fact, it’s remarkable more people don’t retch on the Tube. But in recent years, more and more Londoners seem to have developed the opposite problem: dousing themselves in so much perfume or aftershave that it can induce a sneezing fit in others. Please use sparingly.

Don’t forget to enjoy the sun...

Hire a pedalo in Regent’s Park, take the office outside and just make sure you enjoy the longer days and shorter nights. Because while the Express newspaper is probably penning a “Heatwave Briton: Hottest Summer on Record Expected” front page as you read this, this might also be our only few days of sunny weather...