Army forced to provide battlefield crèches.

Taxpayers are looking at a multi-million pound bill after a court ruled they must provide childcare for troops.

They will now have to supply a crèche at every military base and special secure battlefield nurseries in Iraq and Afghanistan. These will have tight security to stop British toddlers escaping and causing carnage in the local community. The one thing the Taliban fear more than the Ghurkhas is a gang of pre-schoolers with runny noses armed with Lego bricks.

Battlefield Creche

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The rest of the forces look set to follow with the Navy having their Mini-Matelots in every ship, the Royal Marines will have the Baby Booties while the RAF won't need any as they are all homosexuals.