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Coach Langston Cast Down to the Bowels of Hell

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Your university's football season is almost here! To get you in the mood, UD will be running some noteworthy gridiron stories.

Chuck Langston's short tenure as football coach at the University of Central Oklahoma has been marked by cheating of every conceivable sort. The NCAA finally got wind of it, and punishment has now been handed down: Two weeks with no working. At full salary.

There is one thing he'll be required to do. "He will be required to study NCAA rules and regulations," says a campus spokesman.

Local Oklahoma news outlets assure their readers that despite this glitch the team's pumped. Ready to roll.

And after all it's amazing how quickly a serious punishment can clear things up. "I am extremely proud of all of our coaches and athletic programs," says the university's president. "And I have every confidence that the football program is now on the right track." Coach Langston will be back to running things before you know it; and, having refreshed his knowledge of the rules and regulations, he'll direct a nice clean program from here on in.