Why Nike is getting out of the wearable game

After great success with the release of the Grimace pogo stick and the Hamburglar jump rope, we are sad to announce that the McNugget Pedometer will end its run next week. While the team behind the device was and still is very proud of it, the number of devices sold has not met our expectations. Apparently both the desire to consume the device upon purchase, as well as the “rotting” smell that tends to appear after about two days of owning the device has led to both critics and consumers being less than pleased with our product. We apologize for letting you, the customer, down. We would also like to extend a sincere apology to Mr. Ronald McDonald. We never intended to harm the McDonald name. However, we think that our next product,…