Christmas 2005

USS LOS ANGELES CHRISTMAS PARTY, 2005

One good thing about the boat was the epic Christmas parties that we used to have. The previous year, we had it on the rooftop of Dave & Buster’s. I got so shit-housed that I think I won a DVD player but I was too drunk to read my raffle ticket number, and someone else claimed it. Whatever. This year was the same deal, rooftop of Dave & Buster’s, but this year we decided to rent a stretch Lincoln Navigator! Yes, they make those, and they’re sweet as hell. I got insanely poop-faced on the ride downtown. I have a collection of pictures from the whole day leading up to the party.

Once I got down to D&B’s in Waikiki, I was too drunk to party and didn’t feel like going in. That’s a nice way of saying that I pussed out. What I had done earlier was stash my car down there in the parking lot, and got ride out to Pastry’s in Kailua, where the pre-game was starting, and the limo was picking us up from.

Once the Navigator arrived at the spot, I made like Houdini (as I was getting good at) and hustled my way over to my car. I shook off my intoxication and drove hammered (exactly the speed limit) up the Pali Highway to home and my glorious queen-sized bed.

The rest of December was boring. We were on shift-work and I got stuck on Mids. There were many times that Junior – who wrote the shift-work watch bill for a while – would put us both on Swings because he like to party with me. It’s good to become friends with even the people that others hate, just for that reason. They might someday hook you up, when they are in a position to.

Swings are the bomb shift because you get off in time to get down to the bar at the “fun” time, about 11pm. And you get to sleep in and don’t have to be to work until about 3 pm. Perfect shift for the party crowd. When in Rome…

December 18th was the day that I again pussed out on a good time. This was becoming all too common and I was starting to feel my age. Hokie, Gamecock and I drank some mushroom tea (this time, the stuff we grew ourselves) and Gamecock and Hokie went down to Waikiki to hang out for the day. It was a Sunday, and I was feeling like a homebody. Sense a trend here? At one point…

Pips: “Man, you’re becoming a total homebody. Pussy.”

It was true, and I didn’t care.

Anyways, I told Hokie and Gamecock that I had some other party to go to, but I just stayed home smoking cigarettes and washing my car. Romy stopped over randomly, just to say ‘Hi.’

It was truly a pleasant surprise as I hadn’t talked to him in awhile. Actually, he had come over to show off his kick-ass new security system that he put on his Mustang. It truly was fucking cool.

Me: “Dude. I am tripping balls right now.”

Romy: “Really?! Are going to be okay here by yourself?”

Me: “Yeah. I’ll be fine, I’m just chillin, washin’ my car and shit.”

Romy: “Well, I’m going to a party if you want to come along, get out of the house..”

This Christmas was very relaxing. After talking on the phone with my entire family, I just hung out with my roommates. All three of us were in port, and no one had duty or some other shit going on. Being on three different boats, Hokie on the Columbia, Gamecock on the Tuscon and me on my boat. All three of us had different and hectic schedules. I don’t need to tell you what a rare thing it was to get all three of us in a room together. It was like a breath of fresh air. We could laugh and bullshit about stuff not related to work, because we didn’t work together, but came from a common understanding of what we actually did at work.

When you get into a tight-knit group like that, everything becomes an inside joke and you get sick of one another. I could listen to a conversation between Russ and his buddies from the Tuscon and I would be completely lost because they develop their own language. It was all inside jokes, slang and references to shit that only an insider would understand. Hanging out with Hokie and Gamecock was like stepping out of the sauna and jumping into the pool.

It felt good.

We sat around and watched A Christmas Story. Gamecock didn’t feel like cooking, so naturally, we went to the one place in Kailua that was open that had food. A Chinese food joint. That was the first time I actually ate Chinese food on Christmas Eve.

Fa ra ra ra raaaaa, ra ra ra raaaaaahh.

The next morning, Christmas Day, 2005, yet another of me and Hokie’s classmates from Nuke school in South Carolina arrived on the island. He was my roommate in upstate N.Y.

And he finally made it out to the island! One more crew-member to add to the entourage.

Farmer had gotten picked up for a two year staff tour after we finished school in Saratoga Springs. The kid was wicked smart and had the right personality to get the attention of the higher ups, and he loved it. He was what we call a “Diggit.” He was in the Navy and he “Diggs it.” I was envious of him because I had a blast in NY and didn’t want to leave. Good times.

Farmer was crashing in our spare room. At that Ilikala Place house, there was a separate attached room that was used as a workshop previously. Hokie had some other guy from his boat set it up, but he was gone and our old buddy moved in there until he could find a place of his own.

It was good to have so many guys from the training pipeline out there. Hokie, Gamecock, Farmer, PornStar, and a few others….

Quote of the month for December 2005: “Beware of any enterprise that requires new clothes.” -Thoreau