Pokémon…one of the most influential franchises in gaming history. Created by Satoshi Tajiri in 1995, the series has captured the hearts and wallets of millions of people. Spanning over twenty years as of this year, and has spread itself into other forms of media such as an anime with varying degrees of quality, a card game, various movies, and even shitty hentai doujins, it’s no doubt that Pokémon left quite an impression on the human race. However some fans go so far as to recreate Pokemon’s winning formula by creating fangames of varying degree. Unfortunately, most of these fangames are nowhere near as good as the actual Pokémon games themselves.

Which is where I come in. I’ve been to the depths of the Shadow Realm, and have played these games, both at my detriment, and at the amusement of you all. Join me, as I delve into the world of Pokémon fangames, where edginess and Fakémon run rampant, and there is no god which can save you from this torture, which is given to those who are damned to the Tenth Circle of Hell.

We’ll begin the series with one of the oldest fangames of it’s kind, Pokémon Light Platinum; a game that was released at the very beginning of 2009, and runs on the Visual Boy Advance. Originally heralded as the greatest fangame of all time, it now pales when compared to other games such as Uranium, Reborn and Rejuvenation. But those games can wait their turn, cause right now, I want to show why Light Platinum isn’t as good as people say it is.

One of the main draws to the game is that it featured all 649 Pokémon as of the games release, though it lacked Kyurem-Black and Kyurem-White as Black/White 2 weren’t out when the game was last updated. However since it’s runs on a Pokémon Emerald rom, the physical/special split wasn’t out yet, which came at a detriment to some of the Pokémon from the later generations. Another one of the games big selling points was that it featured two regions as opposed to one region, much like in G/S/C and HG/SS.

Now to get into the plot of the game, or should I say lack of a plot. I’m not exaggerating when I say that even the weakest story in the main Pokémon games is more enjoyable than Light Platinum’s story. The game starts you out by having you meet up with the Zhery Region’s professor, Jasmine. And no, she’s not the Jasmine from Johto, in case you were wondering. Anyway, she had asked you to help her and Ash Ketchum decipher some stone tablet which goes into detail about the creation of Arceus and the Pokémon World or some shit. The story starts to become shit when we are immediately introduced to the villainous faction of this game, Team Steam. Their goal is to capture all of the legendary Pokémon to have an orgy or something, I couldn’t care less about these clowns. The problem with Team Steam is that we aren’t given a specific hierarchy of the organisation. At the beginning, we were told that the leaders of Team Steam are these two ladies going by the name of Terra and Marina, only to be told that the real leaders of Team Steam are a trio of stooges known as Percy, Kratos and Zero. Once these assholes enter the game, Marina, Terra and the rest of Team Steams admins get chucked into a plot hole because fuck you. So it’s all up to you to defeat Team Steam alongside your many rivals.

No, I didn’t make a mistake. You get so many rivals throughout the game that it becomes more of an annoyance than a test of skill. Off the top of my head, there’s Ash, Red, Kenta, Diamond, Yellow, Pearl, as well as Lunick and Solana from the first Pokémon Ranger game. Why a Pokémon game needs that many rivals is beyond me. Perhaps they took inspiration from Black and White which had three rivals. The worst part is that they made Lunick and Solana Pokémon Trainers, even though they’re Pokémon Rangers, and have no need for Pokéballs. The rest of the characters are also hideously bland; of the sixteen Gym Leaders in the game, I can only remember the first four Gym Leaders of the FIRST region. They have no personality to stand out from the crowd, and are also quite unmemorable in battle. Which leads me to the gameplay…

As I mentioned, Pokémon Light Platinum runs off of Pokémon Emerald, meaning that the physical/special split hasn’t been programed yet. This can be quite jarring as you can capture a Pokémon with a great Attack stat, but have all of it’s moves be Special. On the topic of Pokémon, you get a lot of gift Pokémon handed to you, simply because you’re the protagonist. You can snag yourself an Elekid, a Growlithe, a Deino, a Beldum, an Eevee, a Drifloon, a Larvitar, a Riolu and several more gift Pokémon. This makes the process of catching and training a team seem fruitless, since the Pokémon you are gifted are quite the powerhouse when they evolve. Traversing the routes is a pain since they’re longer than the Routes inside the main games, and are packed with various trainers, with the very first route featuring trainers that have FIVE Pokémon, as opposed to the usual one-two that you usually see in beginning routes. Add in the copious amounts of rival battles and you’ve got yourself a tedious slog for at least the first 50% of the game. In the other half, where you get your badges from the Lauren Region, the second region in this game, the routes are pathetically short.

The cherry on top of this shit sundae is the presence of obstacles that require certain moves to bypass. I know that HM’s are a cancer that has plagued the Pokémon franchise ever since the beginning, but Light Platinum goes a step further. One of the HM’s in the game is Lava Surf, a shitty move that is only required in ONE area of the game. They wasted an entire HM for some irrelevant area that you go through once, and never have to go through again. In the Lauren Region, there are obstacles that require TM moves to bypass. This wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t for the fact that TMs are one-use items in the game, and you only ever get a single copy of each TM. If you use up that TM, then you can’t get another one, period. God help you if you forget the TM move by mistake, since you could get stuck and have no way out. There’s only two solutions to this problem:

1. Use a walk through walls cheat.
2. Restart the entire game from the beginning.

Now let’s talk about the music, and the graphics. The graphics in the game are decent to look at, with the cities being rather well done. However the custom trainer sprites are below-average at best, and flat out terrible at worst. The music is a rather strange case; the tracks are taken from R/S/E, however you don’t hear many battle themes. It’s quite perplexing to go up against a Gym Leader/Elite 4/Champion, only to hear the standard battle theme play in the background. Team Steam and their leaders get the Grunt/Leader theme respectively, so there’s that.

At the end of the day, it’s pretty clear that Pokémon Light Platinum has aged poorly. It’s not a horrible game by any means, but there are better alternatives out there. I can respect the fact that it pushed the VBA games to a new level, but as of today, it’s a relic from the past. You’re better off playing the actual R/S/E games than this one.

Pros:
• Features all 649 Pokémon as of it’s creation.
• Has two regions to explore and catch Pokémon

Cons:
• Too many rivals and the long routes make the first half of the game painfully tedious
• Team Steam may be the worst Pokémon antagonists of all time.
• Characters show little to no growth/development
• The Field Move mechanic can royally screw you over, especially in the second half of the game.

Final score: 5 N’s out of 10

Inspired by Andrew in Steamland. Seriously you should check it out, it’s an awesome series.

Here’s the draft of my first analysis. Any constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated.

Last edited by GorillaGamer on Fri Jun 30, 2017 7:38 am, edited 3 times in total.

Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?

A quote from Project AFTER

Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.

Welcome back everyone, to Pokémon Fangame Critique. I am your ever malevolent host, GorillaGamer, and boy do I have a doozy for you all. There exist pieces of media that were made for the sole purpose of being absolute shit. It may seem detrimental at first, however it provides the author with a handy defence whenever someone calls them out for making a piece of shit. Unsurprisingly, this extends to Pokémon fangames as well, in the form of Pokémon Snakewood. The game answers the question that has been plaguing Pokémon fans for ages.

‘What would happen if Pokémon took place during a zombie apocalypse?’

As it turns out, a really shitty game gets made. And when I say bad, I mean it’s really bad. If someone were to walk up to me and say that Snakewood is the Ride to Hell of the Pokémon fangame community, I would agree with them 100%. However I feel that comparing Snakewood to Ride to Hell is insulting the latter, as it can get funny at times with how bad it is.

Let’s get the positives out of the way, because I don’t want to sound biased. A lot of the designs for the zombie Pokémon look pretty darn neat. A good example is Dirtkrow, which is essentially a golden Murkrow wearing a fancy looking top hat. It’s nothing too amazing, but it’s still pretty cool. Another amazing zombie Pokémon is Grimreaper, a zombified Scyther that takes on a skeletal appearance, much like the Grim Reaper itself. But the best Zombiemon by far has to be Shinigami, a Psychic/Fire Gallade that’s coloured pitch black, and had it’s legs replaced with a purple fire.

In stark contrast to the zombiemons, the Fakemon added to the gam look terrible. The prime example of this is the Hambone line, which are nothing more than rocks with eyes and crablike claws. I know that the later Pokémon games get some flak for having uninspired designs, but even those are far superior to the shit in Snakewood. Another uninspired design is Psypig, which is essentially a shitty recolour of Grumpig, which somehow made it gain the Fire typing. Then there’s Roclobster, some lobster Fakemon that’s meant to be a shout out to the B52’s song, Rock Lobster. Not the worst Fakemon, but not that good, so I’ll give it that. The absolute worst Fakemon are the –madio series of Fakemon. Their design is a different coloured ball, meant to represent what type they are. These things suck the shit out of my dick, since their one ability is Wonder Guard, with Kingmadio being Ghost/Dark. Keep in mind that this game was completed before X/Y, meaning that there’s no Fairy-type Pokémon to help you out of this pickle.

Now let’s dig into the meat of the game, and oh boy, is it special. It’s kind of fitting that the game revolves around a zombie apocalypse, since the game can be compared to rotting meat. The story is an absolute mess, more so than Light Platinum. Pokémon Snakewood is without a doubt, the most edgy Pokémon fangame of all time. Yes, even edgier than Reborn and Rejuvenation combined. It’s so edgy that it starts becoming hilarious to read, if it wasn’t for the fact that the story derails midway through the game. What starts out as a quest to defeat the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse and cure the zombie virus becomes a plothole riddled-mess that shoves in more reference humour than all of Seth MacFarlane’s shows combined. Hell, at the very end of the game, the protagonist is revealed to be some Avatar knock-off that can wield all the references and ends up defeating Senex, the Big Bad of the game. The final showdown between the player and Senex is some shouting war over who can spout the most obscure reference, with the in game universe collapsing due to the ensuing stupidity. Along the way, you’ll encounter this organisation known as the Inquisition, which are the remnants of the Hoenn government and formed some corrupt police force or something.

With a bad plot, usually comes bad characters and Snakewood is no exception to the rule. You have Alicia, your rival for the game who ends up becoming your waifu or some shit. Then there’s Senex himself, who causes the zombie apocalypse, for some unknown reason alongside the Four Horsemen. Speaking of which, midway through the game, the Four Horsemen fall into some plot hole and disappear from the game for good. It’s around here that the plot shits itself and starts becoming Pokémon: Family Guy edition, and I feel bad for comparing that mediocre TV show to this shitty game. But the worst characters by far are the Deadly Seven.(10 to be precise, which ends up getting hammered into your skull throughout the game.) Their dialogue consists of the most random shit you could ever find, leading me to believe that the creators of this game, were under the influence of drugs when they wrote the dialogue for these assholes.

Even the gameplay is absolute shit. Once again, the game runs off of the Emerald engine, but that’s the least of our problems. The game is ridiculously cheap; there’s nothing wrong with making a challenging fangame, but Snakewood goes about it in a cheap way. The AI’s critical hit ratio must have been buffed to at least 25%, because I constantly got my Pokémon Knocked-Out by critical hits. Then there’s the fact that the opponent’s levels start skyrocketing all of a sudden, forcing you to spend hours grinding wild Pokémon, because there’s no reliable way to gain levels easily in the game. Making things worse is that it’s easy to get lost in the game. There’s one area that has a door that you can only go through, if you have a Magnemite that knows Thunder Shock. It doesn’t matter if you have another Electric type Pokémon, or a Pokémon that knows an Electric type move, you’re forced to use the fucking Magnemite. The worst part is at the end where you’re in this hallway which is blocked off by several machines, and you have to answer several questions correctly per machine. If you get a single question wrong, you have to do the ENTIRE thing all the way from the beginning, regardless of what machine you are on. The questions themselves, are the sort of obscure, nonsensical bullshit that plagues the game, making this puzzle some trial and error shit.

Now let’s cover the music and graphics. There’s nothing much to say about the music since it’s the standard R/S/E soundtrack. There’s more variety to the songs used, so Snakewood gets that point over Light Platinum. The graphics are ok, with some of the zombiemons looking quite slick, though the same can’t be said for the other Fakemon.

At the end of the day, Snakewood is a complete clusterfuck of cheap difficulty, ridiculous gameplay choices, and an edgy story that reads like a parody. Fans of Snakewood defend it by saying it’s meant to be bad, much like a trollfic. However that doesn’t work with me, because of the fact that people liked the game. Think of it as a reverse take on Poe’s Law, where without a clear indicator of the creator’s intention, it’s impossible to create a parody so exaggerated that it cannot be mistaken by people as a sincere expression of the parodied views. Even if the creators really did create Snakewood for the sole purpose of being a shitty game, I still have a right to call it trash, merely because some people out there think that Snakewood is the greatest fangame.

Edger Allen Poe: 1

Pokémon Snakewood: 0

Pros:
• The zombiemons generally look pretty slick

Cons:
• The gameplay has been made absurdly difficult in a cheap way
• The story is an overly edgy mess that copied off of Seth Macfarlane’s test
• It’s quite easy to get lost
• The question gauntlet at the end can go sit on a railroad spike

Final Score: 1 N out of 10

Inspired by Andrew in Steamland.

Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?

A quote from Project AFTER

Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.

*How bad is that sudden level jump? The only one I've experience was in Pokémon Yellow, where they decide to jump up Koga and Sabrina's team by about 10 or so levels compared to Red and Blue, and even then, you've got a shit ton of trainers in the Rocket HQ, Pokémon Tower, Silph Co. and Routes 11 - 18 to help get your team to the mid 40s.

*Something, I've noticed with he door bit: you don't just need a specific Pokémon (Magnemite), you need a specific move to (Thundershock). At least when the Regi quest in Ruby, Sapphire and Emerald did this, it was optional. Even the parts where you need HMs weren't this anal about it.

*The fact that there's no rematches is baffling, especially considering that the game is running on a Gen III engine.

*How obscure are the questions? And speaking of which, they should have just gone the Blaine route and have you fight a trainer when you get a question wrong instead of starting the whole thing again.

*How bad is that sudden level jump? The only one I've experience was in Pokémon Yellow, where they decide to jump up Koga and Sabrina's team by about 10 or so levels compared to Red and Blue, and even then, you've got a shit ton of trainers in the Rocket HQ, Pokémon Tower, Silph Co. and Routes 11 - 18 to help get your team to the mid 40s.

The level jump is alright if I say so myself, It's just that for whatever reason the opponents have a much higher chance to land critical hits/status aliments than usual.

*How obscure are the questions? And speaking of which, they should have just gone the Blaine route and have you fight a trainer when you get a question wrong instead of starting the whole thing again.

Most of the questions have nothing to do with Pokemon. In fact, they're so obscure, that you'll have to spend a few minutes searching the web, in order to find the answer. The questions themselves mostly revolve around the most obscure books, shows and games.

Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?

A quote from Project AFTER

Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.

So far, I’ve reviews a mediocre game and a piece of shit game. Since I’m in the camp that good Pokémon fangames exist, I’ll support my thesis by reviewing a little known game called Pokémon Sweet.

What is Pokémon Sweet you ask? It’s a game based off the Fire-Red/Leaf-Green engine that has the Pokémon depicted as various forms of candy, chocolate and all other forms of delectable deserts, and are known as Pokésweets. As expected, the sprites of the creatures have been heavily altered to suit the theme of the game. And trust me when I say that the sprites look delicious.

Your starter choices consist of Brownisaur, Strawmander and Squirpie, which are Bulbasaur, Charmander and Squirtle respectively. Brownisaur is modelled after a fudge brownie, Strawmander is modelled after a strawberry, and Squirpie is modelled after an apple pie. All three sprites look really well made, and quite tasty if I say so myself. Several other eye-catching Pokésweets include Popsichu, a popsicle version of everyone’s favourite mascot. Banperior, a Serperior modelled after a banana, alongside it’s pre-evolutions Banvy and Servana. Then there’s Peepow, a Taillow that’s been modelled after those marshmallow peeps that can survive a nuclear holocaust. Sure there are some sprites that don’t look as good as the rest, but they’re still miles above the shit that Snakewood gave us. The first Pokémon Sweet has 151 Pokésweets, with the second game rumoured to have all 802 Pokémon candified.

But arguably the biggest innovation of Pokémon Sweet is the Flavour chart. Let me explain; you see, Pokémon Sweet doesn’t have types, but has flavours in it’s steed. There are twelve flavours in Pokémon Sweet, with different strengths and weaknesses. For instance, Vanilla deals and takes neutral damage from all flavours. Apple deals super-effective damage against Cherry, Orange and Banana, but deals non-effective damage against Strawberry, Apple and Raspberry. Then there’s Chocolate which is just like Vanilla, except that it deals super-effective damage against other Chocolate types. Additionally, all of the moves have been re-categorised to suit these new flavours. I really like this mechanic, as it makes you feel as if you were picking up your first Pokémon game, and you were learning about type effectiveness without help from the internet. Though if you are bamboozled by the flavours then have no fear, there are several flavour charts floating around the internet to help future Pokésweet trainers. The one issue I have with the new flavour chart is that since it runs off the Fire-Red/Leaf-Green engine, there’s no physical/special split, making it hard to figure out which flavours are physical, and which ones are special.

Now let’s talk a bit more about the gameplay, it’s your standard catching/battling Pokémon game, but with a few interesting twists. The big one is that berries have been made a lot more common than in regular Pokémon games. This is handy as there are a few NPC’s which can bake you a new Pokésweet to add to your team, provided you have the correct amount of required berries. An example of this is in Orange City, the Sweet version of Cerulean city where you can get a Cupvee, the Sweet version of Eevee if you give the NPC 2 Oran, Pecha, Cheri and Chesto berries. The exchange is repeatable so you can bake yourself an army of delicious Cupvees. In terms of difficulty, the game’s a fair bit harder than Fire-Red/Leaf-Green, but it’s nothing as absurd as Snakewood or some of the games I’ll review in the future. The hardest part in my opinion is getting accustomed to the new flavour chart, but that can be fixed via a few minutes on the internet. However the difficulty is mitigated by the fact that you can find plenty of Rare Candies in the game.

The story of the game is nothing amazing, but it fits for the game. The region of Kanto has been dessertified by Chocobun, a Lopunny that’s been modelled after a chocolate bunny with some cotton candy for her dress. She created the land so that humans and Pokésweets can live in perfect harmony. However her sister Dark Chocobun wants the humans to leave the region, fearing that human gluttony would wipe out the Pokésweets. I’m in the belief that the Pokésweets should be perfectly fine, so long as Bob Chipman and Boogie2988 don’t find out about them. The player character gets three rivals; Mark and Katia, who are essentially Brendan and May from R/S/E, and the Gary clone you can name whatever you like. It should be noted that the Gary clone is this games buttmonkey, which is quite different from the Gary we all know and love.

However the villainous team is a bit lame if I say so myself. The aptly named Team Sour wishes to steal Pokésweets and pump them up with Rare Candies to sell on the black market. You know your villainous team sucks mouldy lemon drops when the organisation’s boss is literally named Jerk. And that’s all I really can say about the story, it isn’t as painfully dark as Snakewood, but there isn’t a lot to talk about like with Reborn.

Let’s move onto the graphics and the music. The graphics are really good; I already talked about the Pokésweets themselves, but the environments also look quite good. You’ve got Victory Road modelled after a Rocky Road, the Safari zone have four different areas based off of different holidays, those being Easter, Valentine’s day, Halloween and Christmas. Even the water in the region has been replaced with milk. The music in the game is nothing special, with it being your standard FR/LG tracks. A special mention goes to the battle theme of Team Sour Leader Jerk. It’s so slow and boring that it makes the guy look like a chump. You don’t feel pumped up that you’re battling the boss of a criminal organisation, you feel as if you’re battling some random mook in the streets.

Overall, Pokémon Sweet is a game I highly recommend. With amazing visuals, a fair difficulty, and an entirely revamped flavour chart, it offers a lot for the Pokémon fan. And if you enjoyed that one, then be sure to give Pokémon Sweet 2th a try.

Pros:
• The Pokésweets looks rather delectable
• The new flavour chart is an interesting mechanic, and gives players the experience of reliving their first days playing Pokémon.
• The difficulty is quite fair for a fangame of this magnitude.
• The story is basic, but fits for the in-game universe

Cons:
• Team Sour and their boss are lame villains
• The Pokésweets themselves are fictional.

Final score: 8.5 N’s out of 10.

Inspired by Andrew in Steamland.

Note: I do apologize for the late upload, I was busy with some personal stuff.

Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?

A quote from Project AFTER

Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.

Note: This review will be shorter than my usual fare, due to the game getting covered in the instalment. I apologise in advance.

There’s a saying that goes around the gaming community that holds a lot of merit; ‘just because a game is hard, doesn’t mean it sucks.’ Whether you feel that games have gotten too easy or not is entirely up to you, I’m not going to judge you for your beliefs. Me personally, I feel that difficulty doesn’t ruin a game, so long as it’s fair. The Pokémon fangame community has its fair share of difficult games, with the most popular ones being the Drayano rom-hacks such as Storm Silver, Volt White and many more. Drayano knows how to make a challenging rom hack, without the need to add in excessive bullshit, which is more than can be said for the game getting reviewed in this instalment of Pokémon Fangame Critique. Yes it’s time to delve into the hellhole that is Pokémon Naturia.

What is Pokémon Naturia you ask? It’s a fangame that looks like and run off the G/S/C engine, yet has mechanics that were present in Generation 6. Which means that things such as the Fairy type, the Physical/Special split and abilities are present in the game. Naturally, I was excited to see these mechanics in a Generation 2 game, considering how the last three games I played lacked the Physical/Special split. On the topic of Generation 6, Naturia has all 721 Pokémon as of the release of Omega-Ruby/Alpha Sapphire. And let me tell you, the 8-bit sprite work for the later Pokémon looks fucking amazing. I’m not joking when I say that it was the sprite work that drew me into the game.

On the topic of graphics, the rest of the game looks amazing as well. Sure it might just be the G/S/C graphics with a paintjob or two, but that doesn’t detract from the amazing quality of the graphics. Even some of the new sprites, such as the character profile picture look pretty darn slick. The music in the game hasn’t changed from G/S/C, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Yes the HG/SS renditions are amazing, but the 8-bit renditions evoke that sense of nostalgia that you got from playing the games for the first time, when you were young.

You may be thinking that there’s nothing wrong with Naturia, and I can see where you’d get that from, as the review has talked about nothing but the positives. Well it’s time to talk about the game’s biggest flaw, the difficulty. I said before that difficulty doesn’t make a game bad, but Naturia goes way too far in making the game challenging. Let’s talk about the biggest part of the games difficulty, the godforsaken level-cap. I absolutely hate it when Pokémon fangames add in a level cap so that Pokémon you catch will disobey you. It’s a cheap way to make a game harder, in a way that doesn’t even make sense. Traded Pokémon, I can understand if they disobey you, but we’re talking about Pokémon you yourself captured, including your STARTER! Your Pokémon will start disobeying you at level 14, if you don’t have a badge. The cap doesn’t work like in Reborn/Rejuvenation where no badges has level 20- Pokémon obey you, with the cap going up by 5 for every badge you own. No, how the level cap in Naturia works is that a Pokémon will only obey you, up to the level of the current Gym Leader’s ace Pokémon. For example, if you own 1 badge, Pokémon up to Level 18 will obey you, as that’s the level of the 2nd Gym Leader’s ace Pokémon. Then again, it’s unlikely that you’ll reach the cap due to the pitiful Exp. Points that you earn after battle. The trainers are alright I suppose, but the wild Pokémon are something else. Don’t be surprised when you earn only 9 Exp. Points after battling a Level 5 Sentret, with a Level 7 Pokémon to boot. Meaning that it takes hours just to grind your Pokémon up to an acceptable level for the Gym.

And speaking of battles, those are something else entirely. When you battle trainers, you are unable to heal your Pokémon with items. Don’t get me wrong, you can still use Potions, but Status recovery items are out the window. Good luck getting out of a battle with half of your Pokémon paralysed, with no way to heal them other than Heal Bell or other moves like it. But the worst part is how wild Pokémon can flee from battle. I’m not talking about roaming Legendary Pokémon. I’m not even talking about Pokémon using Roar/Whirlwind/Teleport. I’m talking about Pokémon fleeing from battle, exactly like how you would. So let’s recap; you’ve got Pokémon that can flee, pitiful Exp. Points from battling wild Pokémon, you can’t use Status recovering items in battle, and a bullshit level cap. There’s difficult, and then there’s absolute bullshit; I’ll give you three guesses which category Naturia falls under, and the first two don’t count.

Before I wrap up the review, let me warn you that Naturia is glitch as all hell. I didn’t talk about glitches in my other reviews, because the worst the previous games had were some graphical glitches. Naturia is another story, because of course. The graphics would spaz out at random points, and end up looking like a jumbled mess. Then there’s this one Team Rocket Grunt in Slowpoke Well that has an Inkay that knows Swagger, and whenever it uses it, the game would crash and send you back to the menu at the start of the game. You think that with all the attention given to making the game as unfairly brutal as it is, they’d have the time to fix these major bugs, but for all I know they could be a part of the challenge. Wouldn’t surprise me, if I have to be honest.

Overall, Pokémon Naturia is not a fun game. The graphics look amazing, and the range of Pokémon is massive, but that’s all there is to the game. The game’s incredibly broken and the difficulty is ridiculous, making this a chore to play through. It’s such a shame, since the game has a lot of potential to be amazing, but it was fucking wasted. Do not play Pokémon Naturia, unless you want to end up in an insane asylum.

Pros:
• The sprite work looks amazing
• Has a wide range of Pokémon to choose from.

Cons:
• Difficulty is off the charts, more so than usual for Pokémon fangames.
• Game is incredibly glitch and can crash at times.
• WHY THE FUCK DO WILD POKEMON FLEE FROM YOU?!?!

Final score: 2 N’s out of 10

Inspired by Andrew in Steamland.

Jesus man what is up with you and all of those waifus! Are you secretly the "Ultimate Pimp"?

A quote from Project AFTER

Gorillagram only gets sexual stimulation from playing Pokemon Reborn and its derivatives.