Monday, July 8, 2013

We don't
all learn the same way. I think that's clear. Everyone learns differently and
certain methods of learning will go over some folk’s heads, while other methods
would have a huge and potentially lasting impact.

One of the ways people learn is through conversation and/or
debate. This applies especially to social issues. People are exposed to ideas
and concepts that they've never even thought about, thus...they're not likely
to go and research, or read books about if they'd never even thought about it
before. This is quite useful in social media.

While the average person going about their life; in this
case, let's say we're talking about the average trans* person; they should not
be expected to answer questions about being trans*. (Though we all know plenty
of people who ask plenty of questions; appropriate or not...) However, a person
who considers themselves to be an advocate should be willing and/or able to
answer questions or direct people towards resources. (Even advocates need time
off for self care and fun.)

When in a position to advocate and educate you will run
into people who are ignorant to your views or experiences. Either by their own
choice to be ignorant, or because they've not experienced the ideas or concepts
before.

It can sometimes feel like you're stuck on "101
level" for all of eternity. I know..but that doesn't mean that people
don't need you. You might sometimes feel like shouting out "I'm not a
book!! Go check out any of the many books/blogs/DVDs on the topic!!" Then
again, if they knew of such resources I'd like to think they'd seek those out.
(Brings us back o the beginning of this blog...everyone learns differently, and
many learn through conversation)

Many people meet new information that is different
than currently held beliefs with aggression; be that verbal or physical.
Learning new information that is at odds with existing beliefs or understanding
is uncomfortable. Advocates and educators need to understand that this is
normal human behavior. One never should accept violence against themselves, but
a little understanding goes a long way. Being able to explain to the person
where their discomfort stems from and normalizing the behavior may ease the
experience and allow for a more healthy coping mechanism.

Knowing all of this…I've recently had two ideas that
are somewhat contradictory; and I wanted to talk to someone about it in hopes
that I might come to a better understanding. The specific issue isn't that
important…What prompted this post was that perhaps I was ignorant to a concept,
or didn't have full understanding. I learn via conversations, and understand
concepts best through talking with people. Stands to reason that this is why
that’s my preferred mode of educating/advocating.

When I sought out someone to talk to I was nervous
about appearing ignorant, wanting to “fit in” and not be bothersome. I started
to notice a trend…the community of people I was looking to talk to shamed
people for being ignorant or disagreeing with them. Even to question their
views would subject you to ridicule and name calling.

To ridicule someone for differing views is to
encourage them to anchor into their view which we’re trying to change. You can’t
SHAME people into agreeing with you. Pretty sure that’s not how that works.