TRASHY GOSSIP

Cats Love Pete Doherty's Crack Addict Crunchies

Recent reports claim Pete Doherty's cats were found with cocaine in their systems. Similar to the air in Rome, Junkie Pete's London apartment is wafting with enough cocaine particles to keep him, his cats, and his entire neighborhood high for months. After noticing his cats were snorting lines, hallucinating, drinking all his beer, and stealing his car for crack-fueled joy rides, Pete came up with an idea. He would gather trash, bits of rotting food and dust from his apartment and make cat treats from it. Pete Doherty's Crack Addict Crunchies are taking London by storm and will soon be available in the United States. They're 40 times stronger than catnip and your cat is guaranteed to love them...but please, keep them out of reach from Hollywood starlets. Medium: oil on wood, digital color. Original sketch here.

Remember those "Smoking is Glamorous" posters from the 70's and 80's? Every picture I see of this wanker is an anti-drug advertisement. My God, is this guy a mess...and 14, you captured it all beautifully.

Several years ago, I got an ingrown toenail. It became extremely swollen and the nail had to be cut out by a doctor. It really hurt, and it was really goddamned ugly.

Pete Doherty's head looks exactly like my toe did at the apex of its inflamation (give or take the corpse-like patina and the mop of greasy hair on top), and you've captured that resemblance to an ever-lovin' T. Thank you for allowing me to face my traumatic past, whilst simultaneously making me laugh my ass off.

You gotta wonder about a guy who names his pet after the slang word for syringes. To this fella, EVERYTHING is about drugs. They probably give him those inkblot tests and he says 'drugs'..'drugs'...'drugs'...

You have captured the revulsion that is Pete Doherty to perfection. Whenever i see anything about him and Kate i think of 'Midsummer's Night Dream' where that character falls in love with the donkey. One of these days Kate'll wake up, see Pete next to her and screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem, for like, five years.

The open wounds he's given himself when he is digging in his skin to get out the bugs or whatnot is what gets me the most. It makes sense that his demons would have coke/crack in their systems. Some of my demons already behave as though they are on crack. I am trying to imagine them high ...

Agreed, Becca. I think he stands little chance of getting the cats back after the SPCA (who had custody of the cats after the last raid on Doherty's place) found the cats to have ingested the drugs. And the Brits are much more animal-rights oriented than we are -- the only way he'll get another animal is if he wins them in a card game.

Gawd, he's so fucking sexy. If he's what Death looks like, I want it! Ok, no, I cleaned up my act, and yeah, you always feel the way he looks, but shit, the boy makes pasty yellow look hot. Must be his singing. I love his music. I hear he really is good in bed too, although I'm not sure when he finds the time, in between hits.

Oh that is just SO funny! It looks exactly like him. I love the end of his tail where the fur is worn off and just the nasty bone is poking out. And the hair! And the expression on his face! It's absolutely perfect.

I've never understood how anyone could find him attractive. He's pastey, oily, and always appears to be flying on some chemical mismash. How in the world did Kate Moss stay with him for so long?! Okay, granted, she was high half the time as well. But this guy is just way down in the gutter. Mind you, they do say love is blind. Gech.