And on the other hand...

Monday, June 6, 2011

It's All About Me

I was thinking this morning about the incredible self-absorption (or is it absorbtion?) of some people who call themselves Taoists, and came across this survey on one of my most faithful reader's blogs and just had to mop myself up.

Thanks to the wonderful Falu Nuwu, law witch, I decided to jump in and do this:

ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? Large scar on right thigh, obtained just after my Grandmother said, "Slow down. Watch out for that open tin can!"

WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR BEDROOM? Dust bunnies and vivid acrylic paintings by my dear friend and astrologer.

WHAT DOES YOUR MOBILE PHONE LOOK LIKE? A tiny plasma TV.

WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO? Bob Dylan, anything influenced by Bob Dylan, and anything that influenced Bob Dylan. And Miles Davis and Beethoven. And Chinese guqin music.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? No, but they TELL me it was 9 p.m.

WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? A gin and tonic.

WHO DO YOU MISS? An old hermit in Wudang.

IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOU OR HAS A CRUSH ON YOU? An old hermit in Wudang.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU KISSED? The Wizard. And an old hermit in Wudang.

WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME? Chinese or English?

THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED? House M.D. and Mad Men.

THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO? My friend who I lovingly call Chatty Kathy.

DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK? Only if there are accompanying weird noises.

THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY? Sun Honglei, in "If You are the One, 2"

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE / PERFUME? Angel, (Thierry Mugler).

WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX? Chinese ponytails and topknots and dark eyes.

WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY? I am smart and funny.

COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS? Green tea.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING? Cheese and pepperoni.

IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Cheese and pepperoni.

WHO IS THE LAST PERSON WHO MADE YOU MAD? I have abandoned anger.

DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE? Enough Chinese and French to get me out of the trouble it got me into.

WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU? A tiny gold charm shaped like a bell, long gone, but it still rings in my memory.

DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE? Of course.

ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED? All except my permanently dislocated left pinky which is frozen at 60 degrees and automatically sets the caps lock key when I least expect it.

WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? Of course, everyone is leaving.

WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU? Just say so.

WRITE A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED? 61.

BLONDES OR BRUNETTES? Chinese.

WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN? I never make phone calls, only receive them.

WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST? Making phone calls.

HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF YOUR COUNTRY? WHERE DID YOU GO? WHAT PLACE DID YOU LIKE BEST? Indeed. The Middle Kingdom, the Counterweight Continent. Tai Chang Temple, Wudangshan.

YOUR WEAKNESSES? A little arthritis in my right thumb joint, and gin and tonics.

FRIES/CHIPS, RICE, OR BEANS? Yes, please. In China, all of these can turn up in the same meal.

FIRST JOB? In a bankrupt shirt laundry in July; worked like a dog, never got paid.

EVER PRANK CALLED SOMEONE? Not since I was 13.

WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS? Reading Falu Nuwu's blog.

IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE? I wouldn't, but sometimes a face lift looks like a wonderful thing.

WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS MEME? Ego.

WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? Wisdom, sense of humor, and kindness. But they're probably lying.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL? Learn to make bathtub gin.

WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? No more birthdays.

HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT? I only wanted one and I got him.

WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? No, I was the first to be named.

DO YOU WISH ON STARS? Yes, Vincent Zhao and Song Il-guk.

WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVORITE? What? I could do without that dislocated pinky. Not really.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A papaya, rice and beans and a bourbon and soda.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Depends on the pencil and paper.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Salami.

ANY BAD HABITS? Salami, bourbon, gin. I recently overcame a bad habit of pointing at things. Now I sort of wave.

WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF? "The Hollies Sing Dylan"

IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Who else could stand me?

HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL? No, but I'm lying.

DO LOOKS MATTER? You can't judge a book by its cover, but if it looks creepy, you may not get to page 1.

YOU RELEASE YOUR ANGER? I have abandoned anger.

WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? Hangzhou, but I haven't done the deal yet.

DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY? Sometimes, too easily. True trust is trusting people who are untrustworthy.

WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? Tiny plastic animals; I liked playing God.

HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR MOBILE PHONE? I never make calls.

DO YOU USE SARCASM? Oh, never....

DO YOU KNOW ANYONE FAMOUS? I think so. I once ran into Jerry Lewis in a deserted bar, but refused to introduce myself.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT? Too old for that, although I did recently dance in the street in Hangzhou with our driver in a night market until the police turned off the music.

WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A PLACE TO LIVE? A toilet, a sink, light switches and absence of vermin.

WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? Baroness, Empress, Mrs. Bee Hermit.

HOW MANY HATS DO YOU OWN? WHAT’S YOUR HAT SIZE? Hats make my head itch; my head is bigger than my husband's. (Although, on second thought, I do actually own a real vintage Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat, a strange gift from the Wizard. I would wear it to a Dylan concert, but it makes my head itch.)

DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I don't practice that kind of bondage.

Tao With Me

TAO 61: A great nation flows downward into intercourse with the world. The female of the world always prevails over the male by stillness. Because stillness is considered lower, by lowering itself to a small nation a great nation takes a small nation; by being lower than a great nation a small nation takes a great nation. So one takes by lowering itself, another takes place by being lower. A great nation wants no more than to include and nurture people; a small nation wants no more than to admit and serve people. Both get what they want, so the great should be below.translated from the Tao Te Ching, Thomas CLeary