Archive for November 2nd, 2012

Those wascally Wepublicans while wedistwicting dwew a line wight thwough the most liberal college in the United States. Students and faculty of Warren Wilson College collect their mail in a single room with a single address, which just won’t do anymore. The problem only came to light about halfway through early voting. If the nouveau hippie kids still insist on voting, they must tell the poll worker on which side of Warren Wilson Road they hang their peace Rasta hemp tour hats. Then, they’ll be given a provisional ballot, to be counted within a week of the vote calls. Only about 1000 voters are in the no man’s land. The problem wouldn’t be so bad if the legislature had declared that hippies only get half a vote.

Hendersonville used to be a nice little town. In recent years, it seems damaged by a push to turn it into a tourist trap. Main Street has been traffic calmed and suffers frequent construction blockages. Downtown has been converted from a business district to an antique market, and stupid psychedelic bears can be found on every corner. To make matters worse, city council has just approved a couple more pieces of art to throw on top of it all.