Im scared i don't know what to do. I feel that death is the only way out. I drink to the point i dont know what ive done. Ive been in a relationship with a beautiful woman that i truly love but i screwed it up because of my drinking . Im at my end because i lost her. I dont know where to turn

Im scared i don't know what to do. I feel that death is the only way out. I drink to the point i dont know what ive done. Ive been in a relationship with a beautiful woman that i truly love but i screwed it up because of my drinking . Im at my end because i lost her. I dont know where to turn

HELLO, 24 YEARS AGO I WANTED TO COMITT SUICIDE. I WAS A DAILY DRINKER AND I DID DRUGS. I DIDT NOT REALIZED THAT THIS WAS MAKING ME DREPRESSED. ALCOHOL IS A DEPRESSANT. I WENT TO AA AND IT SAVED MYLIFE AND GAVE ME A LIFE. BEEN SOBER FOR 24 YEARS N IM VERY HAPPY. GOD BLESS U,

HELLO, 24 YEARS AGO I WANTED TO COMITT SUICIDE. I WAS A DAILY DRINKER AND I DID DRUGS. I DIDT NOT REALIZED THAT THIS WAS MAKING ME DREPRESSED. ALCOHOL IS A DEPRESSANT. I WENT TO AA AND IT SAVED MYLIFE AND GAVE ME A LIFE. BEEN SOBER FOR 24 YEARS N IM VERY HAPPY. GOD BLESS U,

im lost.. got time in program.. part of the problem,, made some money, so havent worked a "real" job in years, but nothing coming in and im living hotel to hotel,, tryin to figure out where to live.. maybe its a higher class of problems, but im lost .. no place to call home, applied for several jobs , entry level restaurant management jobs and i dont get a response.. did that for years, can manage a restaurant with my eyes closed,, and yet,, .. nothing,,, had a real estate deal (flip) fall through in September, had followed for a year and they sold to another person for 10k less than i was offering (would've used "hard money" ).. anyhow. no clue which way to go,, i look back on my life and things just "happened", especially jobs/money.. now i'm 53, scared, alone, my sponsor?? not even sure he workn a program. lol, though im not perfect,, but thats a whole other issue.. anyhow im scared, alone, keep goin through these feelings im never gonna work, never gonna have another partner.. and well, just wish my life would end alot..... if i knew where to start i would, i asked a couple guys bout oxford houses n DC,, but nada.. been living a crazy life, never worked a full year ever since i got sober in 85.. then 96 stopped meetings, smoked pot / cocaine, , came back in 2000 and put meetings first , my life got better,,, and i kept doin what i thought was the "right " next thing, made some money in real estate (by accident), quit furniture sales job ( i hated anyhow) to b there for my parents as they passed away, and ever since i've been lost.. i cant seem to get a handle and sometimes just worse than others, like now... fell into a "flip" sole couple places and now ,?? where do i start?? if i knew money was coming in, i wouldnt worry, but i see no light... can last awhile longer, and go to meetings pretty much every day, sometimes 2 or 3...but duno,, guess i could learn to driv a trcuk .. i need a hand, im bright , smart, nice guy.. decent looking, college degree, and not like i want much, i decent apt and living, ugghh, im lost .. and scared,, so .. here you go!!!, and i know, ODAT, let go, next right thing,, blah blah blah,, i see beer and think damn i want to blot out my life, but know thats not the way ,, but shit,,, when i gonna get relief, guess never

im lost.. got time in program.. part of the problem,, made some money, so havent worked a "real" job in years, but nothing coming in and im living hotel to hotel,, tryin to figure out where to live.. maybe its a higher class of problems, but im lost .. no place to call home, applied for several jobs , entry level restaurant management jobs and i dont get a response.. did that for years, can manage a restaurant with my eyes closed,, and yet,, .. nothing,,, had a real estate deal (flip) fall through in September, had followed for a year and they sold to another person for 10k less than i was offering (would've used "hard money" ).. anyhow. no clue which way to go,, i look back on my life and things just "happened", especially jobs/money.. now i'm 53, scared, alone, my sponsor?? not even sure he workn a program. lol, though im not perfect,, but thats a whole other issue.. anyhow im scared, alone, keep goin through these feelings im never gonna work, never gonna have another partner.. and well, just wish my life would end alot..... if i knew where to start i would, i asked a couple guys bout oxford houses n DC,, but nada.. been living a crazy life, never worked a full year ever since i got sober in 85.. then 96 stopped meetings, smoked pot / cocaine, , came back in 2000 and put meetings first , my life got better,,, and i kept doin what i thought was the "right " next thing, made some money in real estate (by accident), quit furniture sales job ( i hated anyhow) to b there for my parents as they passed away, and ever since i've been lost.. i cant seem to get a handle and sometimes just worse than others, like now... fell into a "flip" sole couple places and now ,?? where do i start?? if i knew money was coming in, i wouldnt worry, but i see no light... can last awhile longer, and go to meetings pretty much every day, sometimes 2 or 3...but duno,, guess i could learn to driv a trcuk .. i need a hand, im bright , smart, nice guy.. decent looking, college degree, and not like i want much, i decent apt and living, ugghh, im lost .. and scared,, so .. here you go!!!, and i know, ODAT, let go, next right thing,, blah blah blah,, i see beer and think damn i want to blot out my life, but know thats not the way ,, but shit,,, when i gonna get relief, guess never

I have had thoughts of suicide 3 to be exact and I have not gone through with any of them I just wanted you to know that now I have a counseler and I am working on getting better and trying to help others with this terrible thought I am not judging because I have no place to stand in that situation. I am not an alcoholic nor a recovering alcoholic I am a family member or in other words a simple bystander. My father is an alcoholic and when drunk he thinks of no-one but himself, my mother is a recovering alcoholic as well as my step dad they are both very helpful in this situation... although no-one can understand unless they have been in this situation which of course they haven't and all of my friends think I am crazy but I was just a kid during the first one. I have had my counsiler ever since and she is practically the only one I can talk to that doesn't start screaming my name in judgement. This world is not fair but it IS the one we have to live in so please make it last! I hope the best for you in all that you do, but instead of suicide try doing a sport, or music (I am a drummer so I get to rock to some hard jams when I am mad), or even go shopping for a jersey (I would be happy to go get a jersey) or what ever you like to shop for. I am not saying that it will make these feelings go away but it will put your mind on something else!

LOL(lots of love), Megan2012

I have had thoughts of suicide 3 to be exact and I have not gone through with any of them I just wanted you to know that now I have a counseler and I am working on getting better and trying to help others with this terrible thought I am not judging because I have no place to stand in that situation. I am not an alcoholic nor a recovering alcoholic I am a family member or in other words a simple bystander. My father is an alcoholic and when drunk he thinks of no-one but himself, my mother is a recovering alcoholic as well as my step dad they are both very helpful in this situation... although no-one can understand unless they have been in this situation which of course they haven't and all of my friends think I am crazy but I was just a kid during the first one. I have had my counsiler ever since and she is practically the only one I can talk to that doesn't start screaming my name in judgement. This world is not fair but it IS the one we have to live in so please make it last! I hope the best for you in all that you do, but instead of suicide try doing a sport, or music (I am a drummer so I get to rock to some hard jams when I am mad), or even go shopping for a jersey (I would be happy to go get a jersey) or what ever you like to shop for. I am not saying that it will make these feelings go away but it will put your mind on something else!

Hi, I want to say that I have experience struggling with thoughts of suicide and despair for many years. I want to reach out to offer comfort. One thing that helped me was to think only of the day I am in, not past, not future. Just keep thinking now. This is the only day that you really are living and that is easier to handle than all the past things and the future. I forced myself to get into a public place.... sounds kinda stupid, but, to read humor cards at a Hallmark or something.. Believe me, I could hardly put one foot in front of the other. Do please talk to someone who is not judgemental. Many won't understand. But, there are a lot of people who love you that you don't even realize.

Hi, I want to say that I have experience struggling with thoughts of suicide and despair for many years. I want to reach out to offer comfort. One thing that helped me was to think only of the day I am in, not past, not future. Just keep thinking now. This is the only day that you really are living and that is easier to handle than all the past things and the future. I forced myself to get into a public place.... sounds kinda stupid, but, to read humor cards at a Hallmark or something.. Believe me, I could hardly put one foot in front of the other. Do please talk to someone who is not judgemental. Many won't understand. But, there are a lot of people who love you that you don't even realize.

Just want to say, I just lost someone close to me to suicide - a sweet, sweet person. None of us, her family or her friends could get through to her. Her problems were bad, to be sure, but nothing that couldn't be changed with time. She is at peace, and for that I am grateful, but her family her friends are all grieving. She left so much devastation. If you are thinking of suicide, talk to someone - the hotline is very warm and they speak so softly and kindly. I called them when I was hoping to find a place for my friend to stay - in the hopes that she could get the treatment she desperately needed. I keep thinking of how things might have turned out differently, but for her, there is no more hope. But where there's life, there's hope.

Just want to say, I just lost someone close to me to suicide - a sweet, sweet person. None of us, her family or her friends could get through to her. Her problems were bad, to be sure, but nothing that couldn't be changed with time. She is at peace, and for that I am grateful, but her family her friends are all grieving. She left so much devastation. If you are thinking of suicide, talk to someone - the hotline is very warm and they speak so softly and kindly. I called them when I was hoping to find a place for my friend to stay - in the hopes that she could get the treatment she desperately needed. I keep thinking of how things might have turned out differently, but for her, there is no more hope. But where there's life, there's hope.

joep54321 wrote:I have been having thoughts of suicide. I recently got my 2nd DUI and also lost me job. I have been lying awake in bed at night thinking what I was going to be writing in my final letter to loved ones. Is this a normal phase for what I just went through or is this something for more dangerous

I AM NEW TO THIS SITE.........I SOMETIMES WOKE UP TO LETTERS THAT I HAD LEFT TO FAMILY MEMBERS DURING A DRINKING BINGE........SOMEWHERE IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD I GUESS I DIDNT WANT TO LIVE........I HAVE TOO MUCH TO LOSE AND I WANT TO BE ALIVE.........I WOULD NEVER DO THAT SOBER........THIS IS THE PROBLEM...DRINKING WILL KILL ME...I WONT HAVE TO COMMIT SUICIDE BECAUSE I WAS ALREADY DOING THAT.

[quote="joep54321"]I have been having thoughts of suicide. I recently got my 2nd DUI and also lost me job. I have been lying awake in bed at night thinking what I was going to be writing in my final letter to loved ones. Is this a normal phase for what I just went through or is this something for more dangerous[/quote]

I AM NEW TO THIS SITE.........I SOMETIMES WOKE UP TO LETTERS THAT I HAD LEFT TO FAMILY MEMBERS DURING A DRINKING BINGE........SOMEWHERE IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD I GUESS I DIDNT WANT TO LIVE........I HAVE TOO MUCH TO LOSE AND I WANT TO BE ALIVE.........I WOULD NEVER DO THAT SOBER........THIS IS THE PROBLEM...DRINKING WILL KILL ME...I WONT HAVE TO COMMIT SUICIDE BECAUSE I WAS ALREADY DOING THAT.

Hey Joep54321, I feel for you. Do you have family? Or do you have somebody you can talk to? Thinking about suicide is always dangerous. Do you have a sponsor? Talking to somebody you trust would help. Open up, get advice, go to meetings. Even if you don't feel like it. Force yourself to go and talk. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Hey Joep54321, I feel for you. Do you have family? Or do you have somebody you can talk to? Thinking about suicide is always dangerous. Do you have a sponsor? Talking to somebody you trust would help. Open up, get advice, go to meetings. Even if you don't feel like it. Force yourself to go and talk. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

I have been having thoughts of suicide. I recently got my 2nd DUI and also lost me job. I have been lying awake in bed at night thinking what I was going to be writing in my final letter to loved ones. Is this a normal phase for what I just went through or is this something for more dangerous

I have been having thoughts of suicide. I recently got my 2nd DUI and also lost me job. I have been lying awake in bed at night thinking what I was going to be writing in my final letter to loved ones. Is this a normal phase for what I just went through or is this something for more dangerous