The 6 Best Semi-Public Places To Hook Up On Spring Break

There are two types of people who go on spring break: those that want to relax and tan and then those that want to rage their faces off. This article is for the latter.

Raging doesn’t inherently mean fucking, but it’s almost definitely going to happen. If you are rolling squad deep with a group of girls who are looking to party like Paris circa 2000’s, there’s going to be sex. A lot of sex. You already know the the dos and don’ts of the spring break hookup, but what about the best semi-public places to get it on? I mean, if the whole crew is trying to bone, only so many people can get it on in the room at once — unless, of course, you’re down to orgy. Barring that scenario, spring break and lack of available rooms/beds is the perfect excuse to get a little ~freaky~ and do it in a public place. With that in mind, I give you the six best semi-public places to fuck on spring break.

6. Beach

Sex on the beach is a spring break staple. I know it’s a “don’t” because of the sand. It’s uncomfortable, trust me, I know. And while all of that is 100 percent true, it’s still a good option for public sex. I’m going to be honest, it’s not as hot as the movies make it seem and it will be uncomfortable, but sex on the beach is something you do just for the story alone. You only need to do it once but then you can always claim you braved the outdoors and had sex on the beach. That’s reason enough to put it on this list.

5. Ocean

If you do it right, it’s actually pretty difficult to get caught having sex in the ocean. The trick is to go far enough so that current doesn’t affect you too much and so that your stomachs are partially covered. If the girl wraps her legs around the guy, any rocking motion people may see can just be attributed to waves. Maybe some people might suspect it happening, but if they call you out on it, a quick fix of your bathing suit is all you need to cover your tracks. The only downside to ocean sex is actually having sex in the ocean, meaning you may or may not (but probably will) get a UTI. You’ve been warned.

4. Children’s Pool

Before you all judge me too harshly, hear me out. This obviously almost only works at night, specifically late at night, but most resort kiddie pools have some sort of jungle gym/kid’s castle type thing that is a part of the pool. This provides perfect coverage for sex. Not only that, but there are all kinds of different seating/ledges/apparatuses that allow the two of you to try a bunch of different positions. If you and your guy are into experimenting, this location allows for that while also being mostly out of the way so you won’t get caught. Bonus: it’s a hilarious story whenever you and friends are talking about the kinky places you’ve had gotten it in.

3. Lifeguard Stand

Basically, any structure that is on the beach without actually being the beach is a huge plus. You can vaguely claim you had beach sex, but you don’t have to actually deal sand being lodged up your va-jay. Again, if it’s late at night, the beach probably isn’t going to be heavily populated and the fact that the two of you are boning inside of a ‘building’ means you’re way less likely to be spotted, as opposed to the actual beach. You still get all the ambiance of sex on the beach with minimal drawbacks. My only advice is to be careful if the place that you’re fucking is elevated. I had sex on a lifeguard stand and then proceeded to fall from said lifeguard stand. It wasn’t that high, so nothing bad happened apart from some bruises and hurt pride, but still just be aware.

2. Lounge Chairs

Lounge chairs are awesome because they mimic a bed, are comfortable, are portable, and have some degree of variability. By moving the back of the lounge chair either up or down, it allows the two of you to maximize comfort levels for different positions. Also, because lounge chairs can literally be found anywhere (beach, pool, hotel room, random places), you can fuck wherever you want. If you are into the threat of getting caught, pick a more open area. If the two of you are only entertaining the idea of public sex because both of your rooms are taken, you can pick a secluded area or move a chair to a place where no one goes. The options are literally endless, which is why lounge chairs are so high on the list.

1. Cabana

All hotels and resorts on a beach are going to have cabana areas, either around the pool or on the beach. These are hands down the best places for semi-public spring break sex for two main reasons. One, they are comfortable AF. Most cabanas are basically king sized beds on the beach with a bunch of pillows. It’s like you are having sex in your hotel bed except for the fact that you are outside and can smell the salt water and hear the waves crashing. It’s fucking awesome. Secondly, they are always covered somewhat, meaning you and your man aren’t right out in the open and are thus less likely to get caught. If you only have sex in one place on this list (although I would encourage you to try all of them), make it a cabana. It has all the pros of sex in a bed combined with all the pros of public sex and almost none of the cons. You won’t regret it..

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Champagne Showers is a contributing writer for TSM. She is your typical Northern Diva. If curse words, sexual content, and drug use offend you, then bless your heart. CS will continue living the life you're too scared to live.
email her at: champagne_showers@outlook.com