Friday, May 2, 2008

Can you believe that it's already been an entire month since Joy Douglas of Boulder, CO, was busted for dyeing her poodle Cici pink? Joy thought that if she took her poodle and dyed her in beet juice and Kool-Aid that it would raise breast cancer awareness. I don't know if that ever happened. It raised dog-dyeing awareness, but I'm not so sure about the breast cancer part. It also raised the awareness of Humane Society officials. Those officials, who apparently wield a power that I was unaware was able to be possessed by those in the Humane Society, ticketed Joy for violating a city code that forbids people from dyeing animals. That rule was deemed to be necessary in Boulder as a way to prevent people from dyeing creatures such as rabbits or chicks during the Easter season (a very popular time of year for animal dyeing, don't you know?).

So what ever happened in the saga of Joy, Cici and the strangely powerful Humane Society Officials of Boulder, you ask? Well, according to the fine folks over there at The Denver Channel, just today, Joy struck a deal with attorneys that will dismiss the ticket. Of course there are a few provisions attached to that deal. Well, they call them "provisions". I call them "stuff you shouldn't be doing in the first place".

This ticket could have cost Joy $1,000 if it was found that she was guilty of violating the anti-dog-dyeing code. Considering her poodle was bright pink at the time, I think that would have been hard to argue on Joy's part. So, the deal is that if she can somehow refrain from dyeing another dog in the next six months (Hang in there, Joy! You can do it!) then the whole thing will be dropped. But if word gets around again that Joy is up to her ol' dog dipping tricks again, then the original charges will be reinstated. Seems fair. Overall, the whole thing seems lame. But I can live with this.

So Joy keeps her dog and her $1,000, the Humane Society keeps it's unusual power to enforce the many, many aspects of protecting animals from looking like carnival treats and Cici gets to regain and (hopefully) keep her doggie dignity. Hopefully, Joy will be able to not use her Kool-Aid and beet juice for the purposes of evil in the future. And just knowing that, in the future, the dog will be dog colored and won't be wearing any clothes, well, that makes me feel as if my pleas to keep animals looking like animals have finally been heard. Now, if I can just figure out how to get Mondex out of that wetsuit.