With 26-year-old married Stephanie Peterson accused of having sex with a
14-year-old student in Florida, teacher-student sex scandals are on the
rise. It’s estimated that female perpetrated sex offenses account
for about 10% of all reported nationwide, and for about a third in
teacher-student cases. Sadly, the amount of teacher-student sexual
misconduct has gone up, and the number of female-on-male transgressions
increasing as well. But if the media were any indication, you’d
think the majority were female, as there are far more salacious stories
of reporting on female teachers.

Some blame increased use
by more students of smartphones and social media; and that female
teachers tend to ‘lure’ their victims via social media more
so than male teachers. I did a previous forum
on whether schools should ban social media interaction b/w teachers
& students altogether.

One of the Psychologists and experts suggest
that for males the motivation is usually just lust, but with women,
some of whom were married, it’s a mix of a desire for power or
control, or living out some fantasy, or they’re looking for
affection.

Whatever the reasons, the question of double standards arise. It seems
both parents, especially a father, would be outraged if a male teacher
preys upon a female student. But female on male, maybe not so much.
Perhaps the mothers might, but the fathers especially, not as much.
While cases vary with charges and circumstances, punishments generally
seem lighter (more probation, less jail time) for females unless
convicted of assault or rape. Should we be less afraid for our sons
than our daughters? And is there a double standard in the media for reporting
more heavily on female teachers than males?

What do you think is at the root of the rise
in this behavior, particularly among female teachers? And is society
to blame writ large for somehow thinking that a male teen is perhaps
less adversely affected than a female teen? Nevertheless, people in
whom we place our trust as students and parents betray that trust more
often, feeding a viscous circle of abused kids, as some perpetrators
were abused themselves. What do you think would help reverse the trend?

I think this is an extremely interesting topic. While I feel in general
(outside a school setting) there are more males sexually harassing women
than female to male, in schools I have been hearing about it the
opposite. Every story I hear lately is about sexual encounters with a
teacher and student is a female teacher. I think while this scenario
happens with male teachers, it is more of a problem in the media with
women. I feel they should be punished as a man would and not lightly.
They are still preying on these young children and are committing child
molestation. These acts should not be treated loosely because they are
females. This is a big issue that needs to be addressed.

It is extremely disturbing and sickening that any teacher male or female
is abusing their privilege to be an educator and instead is using that
power to molest children... what is wrong with people?!! The only reason
why I could think women are treated less harshly than their male
counterparts who also molested is because of social norms. Society often
views women as nurturers and caretakers, and thus when they do these
heinous acts it is seen as something less aggressive and harmful than if
a man does it. This should not be the case! It completely minimizes the
fact that they molested their student. I don't care if the teacher is
male or female, if they are going to sexual abuse children they need to
be punished harshly with jail time. When I was researching this before
responding, it was really eye opening and sad how prevalent sexual abuse
is between teachers and their students :(

I don't think that there is an unusual rise in behavior, merely it is
just being exposed more and spread by the more recent phenomenon of
social media. I believe that society is definitely to blame for
perpetuating the double standard. It comes down to the classic belief in
the "right of passage" that a young man sleeping with an
older woman makes him a man and he should be congratulated. That doesn't
make it right by any means, it is just engrained in our culture. I think
that more strict laws on teacher/student communication should be
enforced and that young male teens should receive more education about
how female teachers can pose a risk and how they should be aware when
they are being taken advantage of.

I do not think we should be less scared for our sons than our daughters.
Whether a child male or female is victimized by an older individual,
that should be cause for alarm. If a female teacher wants a relationship
with a young male student, that is just as bad a male teacher preying on
a female student. These double standards are mainly due to social
constructions we have created in our society. We believe that males are
stronger than females and that they are also capable of protecting
themselves. Whereas a female is weak and needs constant protection from
all forces. But a child regardless of gender does not have the mental
ability to realize that they are being taken advantage of. They may
think that they are in an amazing relationship because they are dating
their teacher. It is sick.

At my past high school there were 2 sex scandals. One was with a female
guidance counselor and the other with a male teacher. The male teacher
was accused multiple times, by multiple students, however was never
found guilty. There was also very little media attention put onto this
teacher. The female guidance counselor on the other end was given a
tremendous amount of media attention before being found guilty and she
was later found guilty.

For the most part, I don't think anyone should live in fear for the sons
or daughters. Sexual assault cases have actually went down in the past
20 years (https://www.rainn.org/statistics/scope-problem). I think the
media is just trying to push the stories that will get the most eyes.
Society definitely sees males less impacted by sexual assaults, however
I don't think many people view them as not impacted at all. Pretty much
everyone agrees that sexual assault is bad for any child impacted though.

Before getting into the topic to much, I will say that I support the
punishments being handed out fairly to both men and women. The law, more
so the prosecutors and judges, should not alter the consequences based
on the gender of the perpetrator.

I do agree that these issues and situations are being brought to light
more often due to the rise of social media and the ability to track
interactions between teachers and students. I believe those in power
positions have always exploited those under them, no matter the gender
sense the birth of civilization. I see no difference between male or
female when they chose to molest children and create an unsafe
environment for which those kids have to go to everyday. As a society,
we need to better groom our teachers and instructors, not just for the
case of better academics, but also for better role models to our
children. Our children are the future of our own society, and if we let
them be abused and molested, then they will grow and continue those same practices.

This is a deeply concerning issue, especially for me as a soon-to-be
licensed teacher. I think we need to first of all teach our students to
be aware of all questionable physical, verbal, and online contact with
teachers and fellow students. Teachers in New York have to attend a
6-hour DASA (Dignity for All Students Act) training course which, among
other things, discusses the dangers of harassment (sexual and
otherwise), cyberbullying, and other such issues in the classroom, as
well as the right of every student to receive a complete and equal
education in a safe, nurturing environment. I think every state needs to
have this, and every teacher needs to have annual training in these
areas.

Abused individuals, as you mentioned, often were previously abused, and
all are trying to fulfill a desire. You mentioned that desire as
different for men than women, but I believe it to be essentially the
same. Those seeking sexual intimacy with someone crave the deep
connection, comfort, and fulfillment it brings them. Maybe on the
surface it may look like just lust, but all humans crave that deep
connection with another person. If they have been previously abused,
feel extraordinarily alone, or have other deep-seated unsolved needs,
they may become desperate enough to sexually abuse another. What abusers
fail to realize is that this connection is so much more meaningful and
so much more fulfilling if it's with someone who feels the same. I'm not
attempting to excuse the behavior of the abuser, but rather trying to
understand the abuser's motivation in order to find a solution to the problem.

I think a portion of the problem may be due to the failure of our mental
health care system in the U.S. The scars of abuse often last a lifetime,
but so many of the abused or mentally disturbed could have been
prevented from becoming abusers through affordable, accessible therapy.
Abusers may also show warning signs, though slight, that those in
proximity to the abuser may be able to see beforehand. Schools should
offer training courses for students and teachers to outline the
parameters of appropriate conduct, prevent getting into potentially
dangerous situations, and handle oneself in such situations. Having a
second or third teacher in the room may also help.

In general, men seem to get more publicity and harsher punishments for
the same sexual misconduct crimes, which I don't think is fair. More to
say but running out of space!

This is an interesting topic, and very relevant given the times we live
in. I can't comprehend what attributes to the rise in this kind of
behavior, only that I hope that it stops. The media definitely portrays
the female teacher male student relationship more often than the latter.
I agree with Tom's post above, this is alarming and we need to ensure
that are students are cared of and that this is not taken lightly. It's
sad that lately so many of our worries for our children are occurring in
school, a zone we would like to consider safe.

I think that social media plays a big role in all of our major issues in
our country, specifically right now. When news happens, it happens very
publicly. It's a great tool for raising awareness, but sometimes I
think that maybe it gives people ideas to do horrible things. I pray
that these issues get resolved and we can safely send our children to
school and that they grow up in a safer world.

The root of the problem with this double standard is solely the media. I
feel as if men, stereotypically are portrayed to be more dangerous than
a woman. When however, this is not the case. Both genders are capable of
doing good and bad, this has been shown throughout history. You should
be tried and convicted according to your crime and not in accordance to
your gender.

This is just one of the issues with today world that social media is
majorly responsible for. They portray things in way so that they seem
better than they really are. A crime is a crime, and you definitely
should not receive any type of lenience for the actions you chose to take.

I believe that one of the solutions is to train kids when they are in
elementary school to learn what is safe and what is wrong for an adult
to do to your body. Show them how to deal with it in an emotional and
how to tell someone that person trusts about what is happening so that
it doesn't happen anymore.

Great topic. As a parent and the spouse of an LEO, I worry constantly
about the stuff I hear going on between the adults that we trust to care
for our children. It makes me absolutely sick and even at such a young
age, I constantly try and stress communication with my daughter and
truly try and listen to what she is saying.

We as parents have to be very cognizant of all situations our children
are in. We need to know and make our presence known among these adults
that we are paying attention and are engaged and are also willing and
able to take action.

Bottom line, it is not acceptable for either gender and we have GOT to
give the innocence back to our children and let them grow up with normal
experiences. We all need to be aware of our surroundings and if you
notice or feel a child is being abused or subjected to something, you
have GOT to speak up and do something about it!

1. Any educator having a romantic type of relationship, sexual or not,
with a student should be severely disciplined. Certainly if it is
sexual, then the teacher should have his or her license to teach
revoked. Why? Because if not, we are sending mixed messages to everyone.
That we only care about this if someone complains. If no one complains,
then what's the big deal!?? We must make sure adults know that this is
not okay!

2. I am wondering if women, as you say, are more complicated in their
motives? Is it okay if the two individuals are in love and want to be
together? I still say no!

3. Today's adolescents are bombarded with sexual messages. It is no
surprise that they sometimes are luring adults in, whether they realize
it or not. A vulnerable teacher, not in a good emotional place should be
very careful to not let his or her guard down!

We should not be less afraid for our sons than our daughters. Male
victims of sexual abuse have every right that female victims do. The
reason there is a legal age to consent to sex is that we cannot trust
children to be making these decisions on their own. There needs to be an
age where we draw the line and say this is too young. Teachers are in a
position of power over their students and some students may be blinded
by that and consent to sex that they would otherwise never consent to.
There is a double standard in the media and in the courtroom when it
comes to male victims or female victims and we need to be protesting
that and getting that changed.

I am not sure that there is an actual rise to the behavior or just a
rise to the reporting of the behavior. It was not acceptable for victims
to come forward for a long time in our history, and male victims of
female abusers were especially not keen on coming forward because they
would be teased for calling it abuse. We can blame society for that.

The excuse that “abused people abuse people” is pretty silly
because the majority of survivors do not go on to abuse others, and many
abusers were not abused. Abuse is a choice of the abuser, and no other
factors are to blame. With education, support for victims, and harsher
sentences for abusers, we can stop abuse from happening to our children.