Reggie Watts - Segerstrom Hall- January 23, 2013

Trying to describe a Reggie Watts show is about as messy as hurling a bunch of random phrases, melodies, beats and action verbs to a wall just to see what sticks. Because, well, that's pretty much what his show is. But the magic isn't necessarily in the chaos--literally personified by a massive cloud of Afro and facial hair, rolled up pants and a green thrift store sweater. It's way he somehow (only God knows how) manages to make his mesh of musical comedy ramblings fit together seamlessly. You have no idea where he's going when he opens his mouth, you just know it's gonna be funny.

See Also: *Reggie Watts' Humor Might Hurt Your Head
As he stood underneath the glaring spotlight on the massive stage at the
Segerstrom Hall for the Arts for the 2nd annual Off Center Festival,
he was instantly struck by the size and grandeur of the nearly
2,000-seat capacity concert hall, one befitting of it's illustrious
founder...Bob Seger. Well, that's how Watt's described it anyway after
walking onstage to a fiery applause from a decent crowd of giggly
twentysomethings. Many of them, like us, had been smiling as they walked
up to one of OC's classiest venues to see a man who's coined such
trademark songs as "Fuck Shit Stack" and "What About Blowjobs."

Truthfully,
we're not even sure what a traditional Reggie Watts review is even
supposed to accomplish. No music journalist could ever use the written
word to keep pace with a man who can hammer out a beat box line on his
Line 6 loop station while gyrating like a Vegas stripper and singing
about Avocados. His soulful voice did it's usual task of stretching like
a rubber band between angelic highs and gravelly lows. He showed us
some opera a la Le Miserables, some girly techno vocals, rapping
and--our favorite--the-soon-to-be-popular moist beats. Ever really heard what sex sounds like? That basically sums up the uncomfortable sound of this his new beat box trick.

One thing
anyone that was there can agree on is that aside from Watts' boundless
vocal skills his show leaves you with quotes for days. So instead of
trying to narrow down what he "did" on stage, we thought it would be a
little more fun to focus on what he said. Here then, are a handful of
memorable his quotes on stage at the Off Center Festival that will
provide you the kind of wisdom you won't get anywhere else:

"I'm a huge fan of Bob Seger, so I'm glad he finally has a center named after him."

"Schmidt is the new Pabst Blue Ribbon...if you haven't made the switch yet, get on that."

"There are a lot more people doing music in the world now. But some people be doin' music for the wrong shits."

"Fiveways are awesome. But that's just so many ports. I'm not sure how many, um, ports one requires."

"If President Obama walk into a room there would be one black person and one white person."

"If there's one thing you should get out of tonight's show, it's about sex, the reason for this entire festival..."

"Pee-pee come back, you can blame it all on me, I was wrong, and
I just can't perform without ya." (note: Never be the guy in the front
row of a comedy that decides to get up and go to the bathroom in the
middle of a set).

"Thanks to the Segerstrom Center for arranging the seating in
such a way that leaves open spaces in the crowd in honor of all the
people who died in the Civil War."

"I want avocados, I'm from New York we don't have no avocados we
have green shit that you squeeze out of a tube and spread it on stuff
and you're just like ' WHAAAAAT?!'"

"How many people saw the stage play of Le Mis? How many people
say the movie? See the awesome thing about the movie was that, it was a
totally piece of shit."

Critical Bias: Reggie Watts really inspires a band I'm currently in.

The Crowd:
Pretty diverse! Whether it was some club-ready women in tight cocktail
dresses, college-age comedy nerds with all manners of unbuttoned
collared shirts or open-minded older folk with a surprising sense of
humor.

Overheard: When Watts built a beat live by holding
the microphone up to his crotch and started making noises with his
zipper. Guy behind me: "I would love to sing into that microphone now.

Random Notebook Dump:
Props to Watts and whoever his Shepard was to guide him from his finale
farewell through the back doors of the hall only to find his way back
onto the stage. We recognize it could have been a lot harder than it
looked.