Are Girls Attractive When We First Wake Up?

My landlord had to shut off our water heaters for repairs on the pipes today. The guy they sent to turn mine off woke me up knocking at the door. I was all groggy and bleary-eyed, and I didn't have my glasses on, but I clearly saw him take a double-take at me on his way out. (I have super powers when it comes to telling if someone is checking me out or if I just have pizza on my face). Makes me feel fine as hell that someone thinks I'm attractive first thing in the morning. Do all guys have a thing for girls who just woke up or does it depend?

Most Helpful Guy

Yes! During the day, she's normally worried about her appearance and all her insecurities are abuzz. So when she's ultra relaxed and not particularly worried her appearance? Turn-on. When she's all cute in comfy night clothes that hide her body from view but yet allow easy access to everything? Turn-on. Her groggy voice, all raspy. Turn-on. The "mmmms" she makes in that voice? Turn-on. When her hair is disheveled and unwashed-off makeup is still there like after we just did it? Huge turn-on. Quite honestly, the only likely negative is morning breath... luckily mouths have a use beyond kissing.

When a woman is irrationally demanding (for example, yelling at customer service personnel who are already doing all they can to accommodate her), when she's obnoxiously drunk, and when she's pretending to be less intelligent that she is... off the top of my head, those are times when she's unattractive. Most of you seem to have no idea how hot you are practically *all the time*.

Thank you for the compliment! It makes me wonder, too. Guys aren't that hard to figure out. (At least not when you are one... easy for me to say, I know.) So I've been thinking about this...

Women measure themselves and one another by female standards, which are a lot tougher than guys'. Straight women aren't attracted to women, so there's already a huge hurdle to overcome because you didn't evolve to be attractive to each other. The media only shows you one ideal and you all fall short of it. And yet, women that men *actually* find attractive are not the rail-thin models you all compare yourselves to. Your friends are polite and tell you you're beautiful and you don't believe them. They're being polite just like you are! Guys tell you you're beautiful and you dismiss it because they just want to get in your pants. (And you're right, but that's because you're beautiful.) Nevertheless, you're left with a problem of never having trustworthy, accurate feedback.

This is all information that I've discovered over the past year. You're correct on everything. People used to bully me as a kid and said I looked like a guy, but I realize now that it was all just an intent to be mean. There was a Carl's Jr commercial a couple of years ago and all the gay men and feminist women in Hollywood called the girl fat, but then guys finally said something about her being attractive and got the commercial back. Makes me wonder why we listen to people that don't really know what they're talking about...

I agree completely. And it's not just on GAG. They do that on practically ever social media site out there, including YouTube. Half the time people are just trolling anyway. The best way to tell if you're an attractive girl is to go to a bar or club and see if you get hit on or groped at all. (At least from my experience)

Ugh. Groped? Even when I was your age I wouldn't have dreamt that that might have been an effective strategy. Maybe to get beer poured on me! Groping... good lord... only after it was obvious she wanted to get handsy.

For some reason, there is a trend of guys who initiate contact by groping. It is by no means an effective technique. And to be fair, my friends say I get groped more than average, so that doesn't mean all girls get groped when they go out.

I seriously worry about many guys your age. Specifically the ones that think groping is acceptable behavior. Is this the "being alpha" phenomenon that everyone loves to talk about here? Until I came to this and other websites, I had no idea about some of the problems your generation encounters. A few nieces and nephews have been my only insight thus far.

No, no, no, no, no. Most guys don't even know what a real alpha male is. A real alpha male has confidence and is a good person, an upstanding citizen (think Captain America, not Tony Stark). The guys who go around groping girls in clubs are assholes who are too full of themselves, but mostly just pathetic little weasels that haven't been taught how to properly flirt with a girl. They're not all bad guys, but they come off as creeps because they don't know any better. But sometimes it's worse when they come up and try to talk to you (if theyan find enough guts to do that) because half of guys these days don't even know how to talk to a girl.

Take water heater guy for example. He had a script to follow "I need to turn your water heater off" and he could barely get get that out.

The girls I work with and my friends are the same. They can't talk to guys and make me work with all the hot customers because they clam up.

I'm still kind of puzzled by organizing all males into two Greek letters based on wolf behavior, as if the spectrum wasn't much wider and, in fact, multidimensional. But I have a better appreciation for the archetype hearing the way you describe it than the dismal impression I've gotten from here so far. Yours is extraordinarily positive.

As for the shyness you describe, many people aren't fully their adult selves until their mid twenties. It's a refinement that others—clearly you, for example—get much earlier.

The whole "alpha, beta" thing is really about confidence. An alpha male or female has confidence while a beta male or female has a lackthereof. Most guys like to call cocky guys the alphas, but that's just an excuse for their own insecurities.

Unfortunately today's parents often don't raise their children to have confidence or be independent or come up with their own thoughts in general. This affects their work life, social life, and especially dating and relationships.

I basically raised myself, so I have much more confidence than my peers because it comes from my independence. Most people my age still live with their parents and many of them don't even work.

Also people who don't have self confidence naturally feel inferior around those who do. That's why guys on here talk so much shit about the whole alpha, beta thing.

And cocky guys are really beta males because they go after the sluts, not the alpha females.

This is related to confidence and I'm curious about this from a generational perspective… One thing I've noticed about the admittedly few members of your generation that I've worked with, is a lack of motivation to figure stuff out. I'm the boss of a couple Millennials and, when they encounter a problem, it's like I'm more of a cheerleader whose job it is to get them interested in doing their work rather than messing around online when they get stuck. Then I show them how to solve the problem and I feel played because I just did the hard part for them. Do you see this generalization as typical or is it unfair? What do you see as the biggest asset of your generation compared to others?

Your generalization isn't unfair or without basis. Most people in my generation were not taught to think for themselves as children. Participation trophies defeat the purpose of having a trophy at all and tell kids they don't have to win or be better than anyone else to get the same result. The default is for kids to put in the minimum amount of effort to achieve the end result, and all end results are the same.

The problem you're having at work is that people who don't know how to think for themselves or outside the rules rarely develop problem solving skills. It might feel like you're doing all of the work for them, but you're really saving them from having panic attacks and then they still go home feeling like they aren't good at their job.

If you want to help them, help them learn how to problem solve and give them some self confidence. That will raise their self esteem and they'll be better employees for you and grateful.

And I think one of the biggest assets is that since everyone is insecure and diagnosed with some sort of mental or social maladaptive disorder, my generation as a whole is more accepting of "betas". The counterargument to that is the betas gang up on the alphas by claiming that they feel victimized when they can't stand up for themselves.

Alpha females are as much of a thing as alpha males, but most tend to also have masculine traits and aren't considered sexy or femenine. I am an alpha female because I had my own apartment, job, and car at 20 years old while the rest of my generation still lives with its parents. But an alpha female can also be the most attractive girl in the bar. It's all a self confidence thing and what the context is.

Sluts are beta females because they don't have the self esteem or confidence to think men will love them without it. Now a sex-driven "black widow " can also be considered an alpha female. Depends on a lot of things

I *always* try to develop their problem solving skills. My quandary is that they don't take it and run with it. To them, the answer was an answer for that specific problem, not a general skill to be applied elsewhere. I tell them so. They are learning, but I'm frustrated because I personally wouldn't need to be shown twice.

Trophies and maladaptive disorders for all... it would be funny if it wasn't sad. On the other hand, what I admire about Millennials is a greater awareness of and care about social issues that matter, and that you all spend time thinking about them. My generation didn't. Baby boomers already tried that in the late 60s and we just joked about how hypocritical they were, given that, by the 80s, nothing had changed. So we watched MTV instead. Lame, really.

Also, Millennials decide for themselves who becomes famous, not record companies and Hollywood. You're the first generation who gets to do that for yourselves.

Agree 100%. Confidence is sexy in anyone. I think applying this to women makes me understand much better what everybody's on about. Thank you!

But you say confidence is un-feminine. I answered a "What is femininity" question a while ago and basically described a confident woman. Excerpts:

I think a feminine woman is free to be herself. She's free from society's expectations. She's free from her own insecurities (and she may well have a few). She's never trapped by her man, both because she would never allow it and he instinctively knows it isn't necessary in the first place.

She gives love and time freely, and wants and graciously accepts these things from others just as well. She's involved in her community and is motivated by her desire to make it a better place for her family.

She can do and be all this and still wear pants if she wants to. (And I mean that literally and figuratively.)

They don't know how to apply the knowledge later because they don't know how. We are taught on school to repeat answers to questions and take multiple choice tests. Cram knowledge to get an A, but nobody actually teaches students how to retain all that anymore, so they forget it by the end of the year. They don't think that baking and chemistry are the same thing because all you have to do is follow the recipe. They think "I've never done this before, so I won't be good at it ".

A confident woman can be sexy, but most confident woemen these days tend to be career oriented or cops, something that's traditionally a man's profession. They can still be feminine, but most women in management positions tend to take on masculine traits. So they might think they're attractive and be pretty, but they also often intimidate potential dates or come off as more masculine than feminine.

I don't know what you're like in person, obviously, but I think you're engaging and insightful. I've always found confidence in a woman either very attractive or very unattractive, and it usually depends on whether or not it's justified. Same with anybody, really. Confidence means nothing if you're talking out your ass. Then it's just sad. Do you find it tough to date because of your confidence? If random guys are groping you and hitting on you, you are not lacking for suitors, but is it tough to get serious because you scare them off before it gets that far? (Assuming you want something serious, of course.)

Thanks. But I've actually never been on a date before. I'm really good at turning guys down. It's not easy to find someone that I could actually see myself with. I've only met a few that have come close. I would absolutely only consider dating someone if it was serious. I refuse to waste my time with anything I know I won't be able to take seriously or I know won't pan out well. I don't need to be wasting my time with the wrong guy when the right one shoes up. Of course, I don't need one at all of he doesn't exist.

He would have to be able to understand the things I went through growing up and why they made me the person I am today. I'm a firm believer that your partner's flaws should be some of the most attractive parts or connections between you. And I'd have to be able to understand him. For example, I could never be with someone who had a near perfect childhood, because we wouldn't have a fundamental understanding of each other.

He would have to be completely faithful, no doubt he would cheat. He'd make me feel special and like he couldn't live without me. We would have incredible chemistry and know how to work through arguments without hurting each other.

He'd be confident in himself, enough to call me out on my bullshit. We'd have to be on the same intellectual level and at similar places in life.

I need psychological connection, love, physical security, and complete acceptance of my flaws. Everyone I've considered has been able to give me a few of these things, but never all of them

What Guys Said 23

If I'm attracted to them before, I'm going to be attracted to them when they wake up. Not to mention messy hair has a sort of appeal to me. I also find it kind of cute when a girl is quiet and tired/shy-- The little smirk thing some people do when they wake up is super cute. It's kind of like a different side to one's usual self.

I would say equally attractive. Yeah, they may have baggy eyes or whatever you'd expect, but there other things that are cute that make up for it.

A lot of it is naturally dependent on the girl and the situation, but as of now, I'm voting C.

It seems like you're in the majority here. I never would've imagined that. I guess girls are just taught at a young age that we don't look attractive in the morning, maybe because we watched our mothers put on makeup everyday when we were growing up.

I'm a person as well to say, they look good all the time. Morning, noon, night whats the difference. Its those qualitys that give us the reason to like woman in the first place, and who cares in the morning.

Honestly depends on the girl, cuz I've woken up to some and maybe it wasn't out loud but there was a lot of screaming and calling a certain name going on.Good thing is that most of the girls I've been with usually look decent waking up even if they think they look like crap.

Girls are less attractive when they first wake up. When the brush their teeth and wash their face , they look fresh. if they do some exercise and take bath they look more active and fresh. Some do meditation and become more lighter. and after having breakfast they just set a mood for the day. This is the time they are at their best.

You must not have read my post all the way. My landlord is having someone fix the pipes, so they had to shut off the water going to all the units on my side of the complex. Since we have individual water heaters, they had to send people in to shut off all of the water heaters.

If I was attracted to the girl in the first place, then I would be equally attracted to her when she woke up. If it were a girl that I didn't like, then I probably wouldn't take a double take either way. He probably thought you were cute if he took a double take lol :P

What Girls Said 10

It's possible one time my friend needed my help and it was really early I just woke up and left I even still had my pajamas on lol and when I got there he was like did you get ready before you got me and I was like no? Why? And he was like oh wow it looks like you got ready.

My profile picture I just woke up as you can see that shirt is part of my pajamas my boyfriend friends didn't believe him how I looked when I wake up. So I took a picture on snapchat so they can know what time it was when I took it

My face is swollen when i wake up. So my eyes look bigger my face a little fuller and my lips are fuller and i have more color to my face. Id say i dont look bad when i wake up too bad that swollen look doesn't last throughout the day. I always wanted Angelina Jolie lips.

Girl so someone checked you out happens all the time. Lots of guys thing we look cute when we just wake up. I don't know about you but I feel naked without my make up, eyeliner, mascara, etc. but you do you.

I don't usually wear a lot of makeup, so I don't have the red blotches that a lot of girls get without it.

I have red hair, so people always look at me out of a crowd, but my friends complain that I get hit on more than them. And guys do check me out even when I'm at the grocery store which I think is weird too, but I've gotten used to it.

No, no one looks good when they wake up. Especially me, I'm a fucking wreck.

2

1|1

0|0

Anonymous

1mo

As long as you are decent looking, even from just getting up or wearing comfy home clothes (tights and oversize t-shirt), guys will check you out. thats how guys are made. They can be married or has girlfriend. or single, they will look.I have guys look at me in all diff. ways, lusty, quick glance, long stares... I am starting to be able to tell the difference.My landlord, is alway complimentine me. I keep it business. last week, he took my hand and pretend to give me massages... i am not comfortable. I dont always look good because i can't be all dressed up at home and I met him in the lobby in my home clothes. So yeah.. you will get lots of look/stares however you look as long as you look 1/2 decent. (eg. not over weight or a slob)

Lol. That's what I was expecting when I opened the door, but my friends say I have super powers when it comes to being able to tell if someone is checking me out or not. And I've been on vacation this week so I'm well-rested.