Not Happy, Kablamm

Talk about anti-climactic. The Dimensional Ripper from Goblin engineering can transport you to Area 52 with some unexpected results (if you’re lucky). The schematic is taught by Kablamm Farflinger – the Transportation Engineer located right next to the teleporter inside the Area 52 complex but after three tries, I’m left feeling rather ordinary. For the one item I don’t want to see “working as intended”, there was no random player/race skin like this one for Cool.

What you can expect to see if it successfully malfunctions is:

Transporter Malfunction – Looks like your pattern matrix got mixed up with the last person to use the transporter pad.

Transport successful but you’re on some random rock high up in the sky. Nothing that a flying mount/goblin glider or hearth won’t fix though.

turns you into a chicken

OK, the last one isn’t that exciting but did you know that donning Burgy Blackheart’s Handsome Hat can break the chicken transformation? It’s very handy for a class who can’t transform since you can’t actually mount with the debuff. I’m told shapeshifting (except for the moonkin), metamorphosis (warlock) and Lichborne (DK) can all remove the soul effects.

Over the years my two other engineers have walked away with something more interesting but my favourite has to be my female undead rogue transforming into a male tauren during BC. I mean, what’s funnier than a stealthing tauren? I did take a couple of pics back then but that was in my pre-blogging days so unfortunately they don’t exist any more.

Kablamm, I think you should reimburse me the cost of the materials so I can try and get a malfunctioning transporter. Talk about a disappointing level of consistency. No? Then how about a trade? I’ll give you my Dimensional Ripper for your snazzy little controller to wear as an off-hand and we’ll call it even, ok?

What’s the most interesting malfunction combination you’ve had so far? Have you created an evil looking Sky Golem or dark Tyrael Charger?

For those non-aussies in the readership, here‘s where the title came from.