Since the holidays are here. I know some women are hoping for a proposal by the Christmas tree in front of all of her family. Some are wishing that Santa will bring them a good man in the coming year. Others just want to find a decent man during cuffing season. Whatever you are hoping for, you must read this article and be on the lookout for these trifling men. Some of you all may be with a trifling man right now and are in denial. If you are, please drop him like a bad habit. Don’t even wait until after the holidays. Just dump him.

The Mama’s Boy
Unless you’re looking for someone to take care of, you should run away from these babies. Not only do they want a mama cooking for them, cleaning up after them, and telling them what to do, they expect it. Your days and nights will be spent supporting, comforting, and taking care of a grown man who should be taking care of himself.

Lazy Mooch
Some men are just freakin’ lazy. Even if they have jobs, they don’t do much else. You see, lazy guys don’t want to do anything that involves the brain (thinking) or physical activity (movement of the body). They would rather have you do it for them. Date nights, weekend trips, or a surprise bouqet? Probably not. This is the kind of man who sits around and waits for you to bring him a plate of food, and feels no shame when asking you to “borrow” a few dollars.

The Jealous/Stalky Type
No one likes a jealous fool, and a woman should be especially wary of a man who checks her underwear, drives by her house, or thumbs through her iPhone address book. Jealousy is a big, fat ego trip with a bit of insecurity sprinkled in. A distrustul man will constantly question your whereabouts, your loyalty, and feel threatened by any male in your presence. If he asks: “Where have you been?” he probably already knows (because he followed you) and only wants to see if you’ll lie about it.

The Pompous A*s
Why? Because he’s better than you–at least he thinks he is. These guys are jerks to the n-th degree. You know the type: the condescening, insulting, “has an answer for everything,” know-it-all who posesses an uncanny ability to piss off everyone he comes in contact with. His bravado is attractive at first because women like a smart, confident guy who knows what he’s doing. But after a while, you realize that it’s not confidence–it’s pure arrogance.

Shy Guy
Okay–so you like the quiet, introverted type. Just don’t expect a lot from him. By a lot, we mean limited (if any) conversation, no social events, parties, or any place where there are more than 3 people around. Sure he’s smart and sensitive, but you want more than sensitivity. And if you want a cool, talkative, level-headed brotha who can step into and out of any situation, avoid the asocial guy whose communication meter always reads 0.

The Cheater
Not much we can say about this low-life. Nevermind the fact that most men who cheat will lie about it. What’s even more disheartening is the betrayal, selfishness and lack of respect shown towards the women they’re in relationships with. But it’s okay–he only gets one chance to step out of bounds with you. Forget about the “I’m sticking by my man,” foolishness and drop him at the nearest corner. Next!

Violent Temper
Every woman likes a guy with an edge. But an explosive temperament is something totally different. A man who yells, punches walls, or squeals his tires as he’s running away, reeks of bad news. And putting his hands on you is a strict NO-NO. If he fiercely defends you, he’s a keeper. If he is fierce towards you, move on to something better. If you stay, it won’t be long before he gets tired of punching walls and chooses to punch you instead.

The “I’m not sure if he’s straight” Guy
If you have doubts, leave. Don’t think about it, fret over it, or interrogate him. And don’t try to justify staying because he has a body like a Greek god. Just leave.

The Magician
Ever date a guy who disappears a lot? Many sistas learn the hard way that a man you can’t find is utterly worthless. He’s fairly easy to detect though: 1) he has phone numbers you know nothing about; 2) he’s never home and you can’t reach him by phone/e-mail, etc. 3) he rarely tells you where he is; and 4) he always has an excuse for not being available. If you think a guy who disappears a lot has something to hide, he probably does.

User/Abuser/Misuser
Most of us have dated people who either drink or smoke (or both). But hardcore drugs don’t mix well with relationships. This includes illegal drugs, prescription meds, and alcohol abuse. If both of you are users, then maybe you’re a match. But if you’re clean and sober, and he’s getting wasted regularly, it might be time for an intervention. You: go left. Him: go right.

The Hater
Without getting all Dr. Phil on you, some men just hate women. Whether it’s from an abusive childhood, gender role distortion, or some socio-psychological feeling of inadequacy, men who genuinely dislike women don’t do well in relationships. They will belittle you, speak negatively towards you (and about you) and take issue with seemingly normal things a woman might enjoy (like shoe shopping, hanging with friends, being feminine, etc.) Seriously–if a man doesn’t think the sun rises and sets with you, and would rather spew hatred towards you, calmly pack your bags and move far, far away.

The Cheapskate
What can be worse than a man who doesn’t have any money? How about a dude who refuses to spend his money. Whether he’s got a little or a lot, a stingy penny-pincher seldom releases the grip on his wallet–creating a financial migraine for you. Gold-digging chicks aside, most sistas don’t expect a man to spend a bazillion dollars on them. However, women should expect an occasional night out, a small gift, or even a measly $50 for a stage play once in an orange moon. If you’ve found a cheapo, you’d better have your own money.

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Hello Beauties.
My blog, AskJanaLeigh.com, is an advice column and beauty blog. I discuss dating, relationships, parenting, marriage, and sex. My Twitter account is @AskJanaLeigh1.
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