FIRESTARTER

Updated on February 8, 2010

Little She Said, Little He Said

Well, today is a new day. The arguments started this morning and continued through lunch time.

My six year old girl Bella has started to gain a sort of "super power" of late (attitude) and a few "new words" (not all nice). My nine year old son is not amused and pushes her buttons whenever he gets a chance. One of the things he enjoys doing is calling her names. Not bad names, but "made up" names that sound like bad names. This ofcourse confuses the little one and she starts to cry for no apparent reason. The power struggle comes when she does not feel that "she is in the lead" or she thinks she is being made fun of. One of the reasons this starts in the morning is if one of them has not slept well and in this case, it was Bella so she started it. She is very sensitive most of the time.

I call her the "Firestarter" because she is usually the one to start the storm in the house with her brother. Sometimes it starts out in a really subtle way. Other times the attack comes in a ferocious form and the family feels "dumbstruck." She once had us going for a whole afternoon and when she finally decided to give up with a cookie in her hand, I knew it was over. I do know that Bella is extremely creative and passionate about little things. Where I'm casual about most things, she pays attention to every detail. My son is a lot more happy being by himself and likes to read and play with the dog. Bella always wants to be around people, she is an amazing swimmer and creates cool things. She is way beyond her years, but she is not quite old enough to read by herself yet. She can, but she would rather read when she is next to me.

When I see her running out of a room yelling or crying I usually know she gave the last blow. Who knows who started it? All I know is the story is always the same, she always ends it. My son will say he did nothing and then Bella will say he did everything. The same old thing, but one thing I know for sure is that the "Firestarter" always "stirs it up." She has so much energy and fire she really has no choice and when she gets mad, there is definitely a huge reason.

Bella always says "she loves me" out of the blue and never expects anything in return and this is what makes her kind. This is what makes her special because even though she wants to win, she is loving enough to stay a loving and giving child and when she curls into my lap and says "your the best mommy in the world," I just want to tell her that everything will be ok and one day everyone will understand you. You are amazing my dear.

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