If You Want Something You Have to do THE ASK

It’s the final part of a process. You put in all the work, you put in the time, you do things out of your comfort zone, you are making great progress and then bang the door shuts in your face.

You wonder why…

Why didn’t she kiss me at the end of the night? Why did they not buy my product? Why did I get shit birthday presents? Why did no one like my Instagram post? Why did nobody vote for me?

Because you didn’t ask them to.

People presume that all the hard work leading up to a certain action will mean that the action will automatically happen…

If it’s been a great date she’ll kiss me right? NO.

I’ve made a great pitch, I’ve kissed ass, I’ve took them to the football game, surely they’ll just buy my stuff now? NO.

The old adage is, if you want something in life you have to go out and get it. More often than not you have to ask another person for something too. People don’t just do things because you want them to in your head.

You think all roads lead to Rome, the problem is – they don’t.

It frustrates me how many people are scared to ask for what they want or even worse are too arrogant to think it’s necessary…

Want a girl to go out with you, ask her.

Want someone to like your post, tell them to like it. ‘Double tap if you agree’ etc.

Want someone to buy your product, close the deal. Don’t wait for a magic yes out of nowhere.

If you get shot down so what? You can’t lose what you don’t already have.

Every week I send hundreds of emails, social media DM’s, letters and whatever it takes to get the attention of the right people. If one says yes out of every 50 to a meeting or a deal of some kind that’s great!

Rejection is the game. All success is predicated on a bunch of rejection and hell no’s.

The game of business and life isn’t easy, it rewards only those who are willing to smash persistence in the face of their setbacks.

Think of it this way…

If I ask 100 models to sleep with me and 1 says yes then I’ve won. Well not anymore I’d lose my wife, but back in the day!

If 1 person gives me some business out of every 50 asks, I’ve won.

If I piss 100 people off with a blog post but 1 magazine wants to publish it, I’ve won.

It’s a game of numbers, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. It’s just true. Nobody wins without being knocked back more times than they’ve had a yes.

It takes practice, but the upside of getting that yes… Of getting the girl. Of getting the huge order. Of meeting someone with influence who can change your life. Of doing something that makes a real difference to people… is the greatest feeling in the world.

I get rejected so many times, yet I barely remember them. Because they don’t matter. It happens tens and tens of times every week and I couldn’t tell you the last aggressive response I got. Being comfortable is now uncomfortable to me.

I don’t care. My comfort zone is that big my boundaries are a little fucked up. But that’s OK because the worst anyone can say is no. I love no. I know that the more times I hear that, or nothing at all, I’m getting closer to my next YES.

If I’m not hustling and pushing for results I feel like I’m not living. That’s my Oxygen and my narcotics rolled into one awesome adventure.

Do the ask people. Do it every day. It’s just worth it. Trust me.

-Matthew Brown

Why not start by asking me anything on Instagram or Twitter. DM me and I’ll tell you anything.

It would also mean the world to me if you subscribed to the site by adding your email address where prompted towards the bottom of the page on your mobile, or in the right sidebar on your desktop. No spam, just awesome new content sent directly to you.

Share this:

Like this:

Related

Published by The Business of Life Club

The Business of Life Club is not your average business and personal development blog. I bring you my big, hard hitting and sometimes controversial ideas for success in this complex business of life…
"Make your business your life and your life your business"
Matthew Brown
View all posts by The Business of Life Club

7 thoughts on “If You Want Something You Have to do THE ASK”

Awesome read! So true, people forget the basic steps in asking whether it’s for the sale or the “kiss” as you stated. We all get hung up on taking the right steps, doing the right actions, we sometimes forget the basics. Thanks for sharing.