Thursday, August 9, 2012

Cancer Tries to Steal Our Summer

Many will
remember this summer as one of the hottest and driest on record. My wife and I
will remember this as the summer stolen by cancer.

Like most
Tri-Cities residents, we love living along the lakeshore all year long, but
particularly in the summer. The days are long, giving ample time to enjoy many
activities. There are the bike paths for our daily run and frequent bike rides.
The lakes and river await for boating, kayaking, and swimming. And there’s
nothing wrong with just sitting on the beach relaxing, reading, or taking a
delightful summer nap.

But not
this year.

Last week
we realized that August was already upon us. The sun goes down noticeably
sooner in the evening. And we had hardly enjoyed any of the long list of summer
rituals listed above, other than the daily run which my wife insists on.

Instead, we
find ourselves at medical appointments related to her cancer treatment. It
seems that time flies between doses of her chemotherapy. But also in between
appointments there are doctor visits, various scans, and consultations with
doctors for upcoming phases of treatment. We look at our calendar each week and
realize there has not been one week without an appointment of some kind interrupting
what should be a summer reprieve.

When not at
appointments we—and in particular my wife—is on the phone with doctors’ offices
making appointments, changing appointments, asking for the notes and records
from past appointments. She also spends considerable time on the phone with
insurance company case managers and the human resources staff at my employer
discussing various issues related to cancer treatment and medical coverage.
It’s a good thing she has experience and education as a medical social worker.
Otherwise all of this could seem even more overwhelming.

In between
appointments and phone calls, it seems we are reading cancer literature or
talking almost constantly about “el crappo,” my wife’s blunt term for the
disease we’re fighting. We talk about all of the above, weighing options,
making plans, and sometimes crying. Occasionally these talks happen while on a
run along the Grand River, or on very rare occasions, a quick evening walk on
the beach or pier. But the subject of these conversations has ruined the
otherwise beautiful setting.

Sometimes,
when not consumed by any of the above, we have talked about doing some fun
summer activity. But then we may just feel exhausted, or just not in the mood. Also,
the heat has been too tough for my wife to endure while under chemotherapy and
its side effects. At times like this I have enjoyed summer vicariously, looking
at my friends’ Facebook photos of a day on the lake or some other summer
adventure.

But we are
fighting back and trying to recover some of the losses of cancer stealing our
favorite season. With the help of great friends and fellow church members, we
have enjoyed some nice meals, visits, boat rides and short getaways. Sometimes
it has taken a sudden invitation to get us to turn off the “All Cancer All the
Time Channel.” People are gracious and caring and ask what they can do for us.
The truth is that after prayer, the most important thing is to divert us and
get us to enjoy a sense of normalcy and to savor summer, even in small doses.

We have had
two brief evening walks on the beach, one on the pier, three or four boat
rides, one bike ride, and just last week, an evening paddle in our kayaks on
the Grand River. We hope to put a beach day on the calendar, maybe more than
one, in the next few weeks. We made it to a handful of outdoor concerts. I am
going on a brief annual camping trip with a friend and his son. In other words,
part of fighting cancer is not letting it take all your fun away.

So as we
approach a transition from one phase of treatment to another, my wife and I
will try to take back some of what cancer has taken with us during our favorite
season. And then we’ll do what we always do when the days shorten and the air
becomes cooler—we’ll look forward to next summer.