This Is About Alcohol, Love, and Body Parts

I know I’m (supposedly) planning a wedding right now, but for the most part, I’m not a huge fan. I tend to declare that I won’t attend a wedding unless I’m in it. This usually keeps me relatively uninvolved, but this year both Sars and Shleisel got married. Both of them tied the knot in remote countryside locations, which involved lots of driving and an almost certainty that I’d never actually make it there alive.

I was about 15 minutes into my 45-minute drive to Sars’ wedding location when my phone rang. It was Peeves.

“Hey,” she said. “What are you doing?”

“Driving…”

“Oh. Well… I’d planned on riding with you. I just forgot to tell you about it.”

I turned back for her, which is probably the only reason I ever actually ended up at the wedding. Once there, we were tasked with all manner of Bridesmaid-y sorts of tasks, including the monumentally challenging task of arranging chairs in a circle so the couple could get married whilst surrounded by people they love. This all sounded great in theory, but it was actually like an adult version of one of those horrifying math problems:

“If you have 240 chairs and 14 of them are stacked in a place you won’t notice until you’ve already made a circle, how wide should the aisle be?”

or

“How many 20-somethings does it take to figure out that when one half of the circle has 30 chairs, and the other half has 22 it is because the circle is lopsided?”

There was a lot of debate on the best approach, with half a dozen women in long maxi dresses pouring over calculations and trying to use long division. Eventually my voice of reason won out, as I repeatedly insisted, “MATH IS THE WORST” and “STONEHENGE WAS BUILT WITHOUT IPHONES, LET’S BE LIKE STONEHENGE.”

Sars was the ultimate Type-B bride, which meant that every time we consulted her on how she wanted something, her response was “follow your heart.” This is why we are besties.

Everyone kept telling me to “take notes” for my own future nuptials. I’m pretty sure the most important thing I learned was a confirmation that I do, in fact, need there to be a lot of alcohol involved in the moments leading up to the ceremony.

Peeves is with-child, which meant she couldn’t partake and was resigned to sticking her nose in the glass and moaning.

“I detect a faint hint of oak. It is pleasant. Oh yes.”

Eventually all the women ended up in a bathroom, hiding from the groom and waiting for the action to begin. Then the Mother of the Bride rushed in with a sack full of glass bottles.

“I found the goods!”

It was the leftover booze from the bachelorette party.

When it came time to actually walk down the aisle, I could feel The Ugly Cry coming on. I may not attend a lot of weddings, but when I do, I Ugly Cry my heart out. Even when I’m a +1 and don’t know the couple, my face is distorted in a quiet sob from the moment the music begins.

Thankfully a huge bumblebee decided to pollenate my bouquet just as we headed down the aisle, which meant I spent the entire time saying “Oh my God, go away, WTF, stop it,” which was like a throwback to my reaction when Alex popped the question.

But The Ugly Cry was not done with me—especially when they began reciting their vows. They’d been together for about a year and a half, after meeting at her sister’s wedding across the country. Sars had flown in from China to attend and only had a few days to get to know this tall bearded fellow. Shortly afterwards she flew back out of the country. A few months later he left his job and booked a flight to China because he had a funny feeling that she was the one for him. Everyone waited with optimism, trying not to imagine how awkward it would be if it didn’t work out.

As he described their crazy love, the Ugly Cry was briefly kept at bay when the Matron of Honor turned around to ask the other nine bridesmaids “Where’s the ring? Where’s the ring? Do you have the ring?”

She skipped off to retrieve it, while I tried to figure out how I might MacGyver a temporary replacement out of bits of hair and flower stems. Thankfully this proved unnecessary.

The after party was a delicious infusion of wine, beer, cheese, lamb stew, and cinnamon rolls and the first dance was a perfectly choreographed rendition of “Love is an Open Door” from Frozen. Alex and I watched from a distance, huddled around a fire pit, where unsupervised children defaulted to us as the authority on whether or not they could get away with throwing dried lily pads into the fire or letting their marshmallows go out in a blaze of wildly waving glory.

“Yes, children. By all means, catch things on fire. This is a time for passion and love.”

They had more guests than I have Facebook friends, which is no surprise, since they’re the sort of people that love well. Speaking of love—I made them play an awkward game at their couple’s shower, wherein they had to guess at Sars’ favorite part of his body.

SHE NAILED IT.

Clearly they’re headed in the right direction. It’s weird to look back at the friends who’ve been through such epic sloughs of shite with me and see how we’ve still managed to stay together. That might have made a really great basis for a toast, but I decided to spare everyone, even though Sars kind of deserved it. At Peeves’ wedding several years ago, Sars and I both gave toasts– mine had something to do with a late night arrest and true love, but Sars’ was more like this: “I can’t believe I’m in your wedding, because I used to not like you at all. And I was in love with your fiance and knew him before you ever came along. So this is kind of unbelievable.”

How’s that for a fairytale ending.

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Comments

I think I was the awkward wedding toast. Best man at my best friend’s wedding and I forgot my speech . . . it was in the ‘wrong pocket’. I stumbled through it and then ran to the bar as soon as I was free to drink again. Seems I can write a multiple book fantasy series, but damned if I can do a speech.

Isn’t the rule if the bride is with child, the bridal party has to drink for her? Also I fully agree with on the math statement. No good comes of mixing it with a wedding.

Ha– I would die. When it comes to a speech, it has to either be a story that I’m telling or a series of statements that I’ve memorized. I will butcher it every time. Thankfully there was a bar for you to flee to… And that seems like an appropriate rule, haha. Hopefully won’t be necessary at my wedding!

I am the biggest ugly crier at all weddings. I just love love so much. Interestingly enough, two of the three weddings I’ve been in have ended in divorce. So don’t invite me to be in your wedding, okay? I don’t seem to be good luck.

Also, I will be looking hard for opportunities to scream, “LET’S BE LIKE STONEHENGE!” for the rest of my life.

YES. We are the same person. And so far none of the weddings I’ve been in have ended in divorce *knocks on wood* Sometime I need to blog about my poor Sister in Law’s wedding, where I sat on the front row and bawled because I thought he was making a mistake. Good times.

Oh my gosh. Yes. I cry at weddings on TV! It’s ridiculous, I’m aware, but I still do it.
I was at one wedding where the best man gave an incredibly hilarious toast, everyone was in tears from laughter. He talked about things he wasn’t going to talk about (ie: “I told him I wouldn’t talk about the time when …”) and it was so perfectly timed and well written. Even if you didn’t know what he was talking about, the words he chose made you realize how funny it was. One of the guests at that wedding was the maid of honor at another wedding a few months later. She decided to do the same thing (even though a lot of the guests were at the previous wedding, and she’s not the best with words, nor being hilarious) and it was SO PAINFUL! I wanted to cry, but not from laughter.

My father was the King of ugly cry. And with eight daughters, he managed to get in a lot of tears. I remember hearing a sound behind me at my wedding. When I sneaked in a look, I could see him sobbing away. The sound, however, was from my mother. She was pointing at him and cracking up.

Oh Lordy- somehow, Aussa, weddings bring out the worst in me. I was the best man at my good friend’s wedding and the last clear memory I have is crawling under a long table full of people at the reception. There are short fuzzy images of asking to have the car stopped and of a 2 day hangover. I knew I was in trouble when I woke up the next morning and found my girlfriend asleep in the other bed in the motel room.

Great story and pictures. Loved the part where the bee was naturally drawn to your flower-like beauty and joined you in your walk down the aisle. Ha!

Haha oh yes you are definitely in trouble if she was in the other bed! Hilarious. Now that I think of it, the first time I was ever tipsy perhaps drunk was at my 3rd brothers wedding… I decided to finish everyone’s champagne that they left on the table after the toast. Such a rebel.

I don’t cry at weddings, unless it’s at my own, but that’s another story. I don’t cry at weddings because I don’t go to them. The last one I went to was my own! And only because I kind of had to be there. Before that it was my first marriage, before that it was my sister’s wedding. That’s it. I don’t do weddings or funerals. 😉

You sound like me, Jackie! I keep getting confused about things– like having people seated from the side aisles. I was like “really? people do that?” Apparently I am woefully lacking in wedding experience. But when I go… they destroy me. Ha.

Awwww – Love the picture where the bride looks like she is holding back tears. It looks like a very sincere and lovely wedding. Of course YOU have blog readers to think of so we expect YOUR wedding to feature; freaks, fire, police, Zombies?, hysterical outbursts (video please) and all manner of shenanigans – don’t let us down!

I know! They were both crying and then his mother was crying and it is a good idea that this wasn’t a wedding with a stage because I would have been up there looking like I needed the Heimlich maneuver.

Oh there will definitely be zombies and chaos at mine. Last night I decided to line the aisle with 24 candles. So we’re going to have 10 small children walking down the aisle ahead of me. Surrounded in fire. Let’s let that marinate for a bit.

sounds like it’s time to befriend some firefighters and get them on that guest list. OR invite hot stripper “firefighters” because nothing says “I will love you forever” then a bunch of dudes in breakaway clothing…dammit I should be a wedding coordinator

I have never cried at a wedding, but we had an awful lot of self-professed non-criers at ours who were sniffling and dabbing at their eyes during the ceremony. Being the awesome friends we are, we have never let them live it down.

No one’s ever delivered a truly terrible speech on my watch, but we have encountered some of the most dreary and soul-suckingly boring wedding officiants known to man at a couple of our friends’ ceremonies. I didn’t think it was possible to drain every last bit of romance out of a wedding, but they managed it. Imagine Ben Stein paraphrasing the legal definition of marriage twenty different ways, and you’ll have an idea of what we sat through. Twice.

Awwww you moved them to tears! There’s something weirdly satisfying about that. I’m evil, of course, but anytime I write something and people tell me it made them cry I am like *jumps in the air, pumps fist*

I’ve also been to super horribly boring weddings… and awkward weddings… and… I have to limit my comments lest I jinx myself or they ever read this, haha.

Also I totally forgot about this until now, but a friend of mine was once in a wedding where the best man got plastered and tried to punch the bride. Made me glad the biggest hiccup at my wedding was my great-aunt accidentally setting her table’s bread basket on fire.

I’ve been trying to be wedding productive this week, but I saved all the math tasks for Alex. Last night he came over to solve my monstrous calculations and it was the only thing I’d planned on us doing– thinking it would take forever and be super confusing. It ended up being math so basic you couldn’t justify putting it on a flash card…

Such a wedding crier. Well, an all-the-time crier if I’m being honest, but wedding cries are included in that. I usually try for One Artful Tear and that lasts for about a second and a half before Full Ugly Cry

I always cry at weddings. Including both of my own where I had to be remade-up afterwards. The most awkward toast I ever saw involved the best man saying of the bride, “Kirsty, when I first met you I thought you were a massive bitch… but you’re okay now.”

OKAY see I think this is another good reason to do the bridal photos BEFORE the ceremony. Because yeah– my face is going to be a wreck afterwards. I mean– just living in the day makes my face all blotchy and sweaty (lets call it fresh and glowing). I need to start researching waterproof mascara now.

And I love the sound of that speech!!!! Heartfelt and honest is where its at haha.

At this point, I have only been to a small number of funerals. A child, my Grandfather, a friend lost to suicide. I did okay at my Grandfather’s, until I saw my Grandmother :-/
I think a child’s funeral is the worst experience in the entire world. Ahhh lets think of other things.

Is it okay for me to play a song at my wedding, while people are being seated that says “lovely lady let me drink you, every drop” or something like that? Too sexual? Ha…

I always think I will roll my eyes. I go like a sociologist, ready to be like “how quaint, little country folk” and then I’m rolling on the floor like “and then when he– and she– and there was that moment when–” It’s a problem.

I do the ultimate ugly cry. I try to keep it subtle, but you know how that goes. Last wedding I went to I thought I’d managed it… Then the wedding pics came out and the one close-up shot of moi? Mid-ugliest cry ever. Not. Ok. Mister Photographer Man. Not ok.

How could any posts with a title like that NOT be an interesting story??? LOL!! I recently had the pleasure of coordinating one of my friend’s wedding. She did all the hard part…pick the venue, pick out the bridesmaid dresses, get the preacher, pick flowers, cake, etc. I went to several of her meetings so I knew what she wanted but then on her day I made damn sure everything happened exactly the way she wanted it to and IT DID! (I’m good at my job) 🙂 It was perfect!! Hard work, but perfect! And I wouldn’t let her pay me. She gave me a beautiful necklace though and that was a wonderful surprise. Love her! And no I won’t do this for just anyone! Just those I love lots and lots and lots! 😉
I’m sure your wedding will be fun and full of good things and everyone else will be doing the Ugly Cry! But I have a small suggestion that helps the couple during the ceremony. Do a first look for pictures BEFORE the wedding. This is when you see each other for the first time… he sees you in your dress etc. You can cry all you want, have time to redo the makeup then you can say “Let’s do this!” and the stress and emotion is mostly over during the ceremony and you can concentrate on not forgetting the ring or vows… HA HA HA!!
I think it will be great!!!!!

YES!!!! Okay my oldest sister in law is going to be the “you” at my wedding. She is very much a take charge, energetic sort of person. I have already informed her of her role as drill sergeant, haha. And you know– I completely agree about the first look. Because I want the photos to be pre-ugly cry, and I feel like that is the best choice for how Alex and I are. We’re private, we’d rather have a moment to ourselves before the craziness begins and we’re drug in a million different directions with everyone staring. And yeah– I don’t like photos so it would be nice to have the important ones out of the way and then just do family before the reception. I like your expert opinion 😀

I haven’t gone to many weddings. I think I’ve attended the ceremony twice. My band played a few receptions that I remember as being pretty good gigs (except for the inevitable request from the bride and or groom we weren’t prepared for) none of which made me cry. I have been caught wiping my eyes after a marriage proposal video on youtube, however.

Oh my gosh, YouTube. I’ve cried at those proposals too, whilst knowing that I would murder Alex if he’d done anything like that. Sometimes on a particularly uneventful Tuesday afternoon I can be found in my office quietly sobbing away while watching YouTube…

You know what I love about you Aussome? You’re crazy…and the best part is that so are all of your mates. Your little rag tag family is the ultimate block buster Rom Com…I’m gonna get onto tracking down Liam again I think.

Yes! Find Liam! Samara was cracking me up on Facebook the other day about how Liam needs to stop letting any member of his family go anywhere because obviously they’re going to get kidnapped. Hilarious.

Sounds like an adorable wedding. I love that when the bride was consulted she responded “follow your heart.” LOL. I tried my best to be a chill bride (only because my hubby and i had secretly eloped anyway, so the local ceremony was really no biggie to me), but apparently all my friends and soon to be mother in law were talking behind our backs and feared that my honey and I were both so relaxed that perhaps we weren’t really in love anymore! They were all freaking out.

Thankfully all went well when we revealed the big surprise at our local ceremony and there was a good laugh about it. But it’s hard not to forget your MIL telling you how she cried to all her friends for weeks before the wedding, muttering, “I know he loves her. I know he loves her.” #HeadDesk

Oh my gosh, that is hilarious. Your poor MIL! Hahaha! Sometimes I wonder if people worry that Alex and I are kind of blah about love– because we’re not super demonstrative in front of others. In front of strangers while we’re out? Sure. But with either of our families we just sort of sit there and smile. They’ll be in for a surprise when post-wedding I start jumping on him and making goat noises (something we usually reserve for our private moments, of course).

I love that you secretly eloped. I remember you telling me about that. I like secret things like that 🙂

Ugly Cry wedding saga to be continued. You are next. I am sure you will blow all the other weddings out of the water. I see beauty and unexpected adventure on the horizon. Those 2 things seem to follow you around like a puppy on a string Aussa. Can’t wait to hear about it ALL.

Haha that’s Sars! The Bride! The day before the wedding. I got to be chauffer, a very high honor. And I think the best moment in life is when you realize you no longer remember an ex’s phone number, so post-drunk texts are not possible 🙂

RIGHT???? Yeah, she has a huge network of people in her life. We are very different in that regard, haha. She is much better at building relationships and keeping up with people, while I am kind of like an ogre that lives in a cave and comes out once a year for provisions.

I’m pretty sure that the majority of my friends are in the bridal party. Which is 5 😉

I’ve only been to a few weddings, one of which I sang to. At that one the bride’s father gave like 12 speeches throughout the night (all of which he cried through) and the bouquet hit someone in the forehead. I awkwardly died laughing for about two minutes while being stared at by most of the extended family.

My husband’s best man was his bestie (do boys say bestie? Oh well) from high school in the sticks. We jokingly said something about the toast, and learned he didn’t know he was supposed to give one at the reception. He apparently didn’t believe us, either, because he didn’t prepare. When the crowd started yelling for “at toast” he just stood there, shocked that we’d put him in this position and said “okay, a toast,” raised his glass and then downed it.

Pretty much all the major events in our lives since then have been about as well thought out and awkward. It works.

Haha! How funny. Yeah, Alex’s Best Man is also an introvert so I doubt he will fulfill that role. I say roll with it and maybe my 3rd brother will do the toast. He DEFINITELY likes to talk. Though it will probably end up being something political and a critique of our culture.

Heyyyy Girl!!! But yea I love weddings. I dont know if I cry because I wish it was me or simply because it is such a beautiful thing *shrugs* Nonetheless being drunk almost always helps any situation. Got to love the booze!

Definitely love the booze. The minister who is marrying us said that he will have a flask in his robe. And there’s this secret room where all the guys hang out and I’m pretty sure it will be like a little keg party in there.

First I have to say that your use of the word “MacGyver” as a verb may be the best part of this post. And it also means that I”m totally old because I remember the show MacGyver when it was on TV during it’s first run and not reruns.

I didn’t do the ugly cry at my own wedding but instead tried to be stoic and swallow my tears. The end result was a non-stop runny nose. I was holding an old-fashioned lacy handkerchief and I kept trying to touch the cloth to my nostrils in a ladylike manner. When I watched the video later I was horrified at how unattractive it was. I wanted to tell myself, “Just give it a big blow and be done with it”. So maybe take a decongestant before your vows to try to help keep your nostrils dry. Just an idea…

I did the ugly-super-loud cry at my friend’s wedding. They wrote their own vows, which were beautiful. As he was saying his vows he got emotional and a lone tear trickled down his cheek. She reached up to gently wipe it away and I totally ruined the beautiful moment by letting out a large garbled sob. It was awful. It sounded like someone strangling a rhinoceros. I was five months pregnant so that’s my excuse. And obviously not drunk because baby in the belly. Later I gave my husband hell, “Why didn’t you cry at our wedding? What’s wrong with you?” Gotta love pregnancy hormones combined with a bleeding heart romantic.

I love weddings! I’m at the age where all my friends are pretty much married (or the other side of it) so I don’t get to go to weddings so much any more. But hey, if you invite all us friendly bloggers it could be like your own version of BlogHer! Which I think would be way more fun and you’d be the star and we’d all bring you gifts, so that’s way better, right?

Hahahaha getting mad at your husband for that sounds like something I would do to Alex. I can already picture his “whaaat?” face. And your description of it sounding like a strangled rhino made me freaking laugh out loud.

I think it should totes be like BlogHer. In fact, maybe I’ll just bring Alex to New York City and we can have a re-wedding so everyone can be involved. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind us doing that.

I have cried at weddings, teary-eyed sensitive guy that I am, Aussa. No sobbing.

I do believe I may have given an awkward toast when best man me blanked out on the first names of my lifelong friend’s parents, people who fed me countless meals when I overstayed after school and whatnot. Sorry Sal and Irene. Yes, there had been alcohol involved. At the wedding and overstaying late after school … No, not the last one. Much. The drinking age was 18 and we did start in high school.

The only time I’ve been in a wedding was my sister’s. It was awkward. The only person who is likely to force me into their wedding is my bestie, and she’d probably understand that I’d need at least three Xanax and/or to get horrifically drunk beforehand. I do not do well with crowds. Everyone knows this and usually says, I hope you’re not offended that I didn’t ask you to be in my wedding.” Nope. Carry on.

That’s hilarious. AND! I don’t do well with crowds either, unless I can happily pretend they don’t exist… which I feel will be difficult when I’m up there. Oh God, I can’t think about it. I think the weirdest thing for me is coming to terms with the fact that all of those people are going to show up and do things and its only for me/Alex. WTF.

I am just waiting…waiting…for the story you will write about your own wedding. Nope, I do not cry at weddings and I don’t think I’ve ever heard an awkward toast. I saw a groomsman pass out in church. It was a sign as the marriage didn’t last.

I’m going to have to sharpen my memory for that day, because usually I pull my phone out and take notes of dialogue and thoughts for future blog posts… somehow I feel like they won’t allow that while I’m standing up there. Other option: bug the church.

I did cry at a wedding before. It was my cousins wedding and it had taken place on the same date the my favorite, and my brothers favorite football teams played each other in the playoffs. I recall that it was quite an emotional event not being able to watch that game. 😀

I am a Veterinary Technician and was Maid of Honor for a lifelong friend/we’re practically sisters wedding. My toast included the helpful advice that if the groom ever made her unhappy he did so knowing I castrate things for a living. I regret nothing.

I debated bringing a prop to prank the groom. It’s a surgical tool for large animals called, in straight faced seriousness, an emasculator and it’s basically the hardware love-child of crimping pliers and those super large tree trimmer shears (if your curious, or want a door plaque to keep the male creepers away just google image surgical emasculator). I wanted to leave it in his car/luggage for him to find like a scene out of The Godfather.

Ultimately I realized this was not practical, would have been horribly expensive, and might be listed in the dictionary under “going too far”, “tactless”, and “constituting an actual threat”. Also, as they were living/getting married in Canada, I had no idea how I was going to explain it to customs.

Fun Bonus Tidbit: Due to my living very far away from them, at the time of this wedding I had meet the groom exactly ONCE.

I cry at weddings all the time. The worst was when my daughter got married. As she came down the aisle, big sobs hit me out of nowhere. She looked at me crying and immediately she started to cry also, saying, “Right??” It was lovely (the wedding – not so much me with my big swollen eyes and red nose).

My friend Dorothea got married at a YM-YWCA chapel on a mountainside- she forgot her one legged dad that the groom’s men had to carry up the 75 steps. There was no space for the String Quartet, they were down a trail in the bushes. I was trying to take pictures as the photographer bailed, and grabbed a toddler by the diaper as she was about to slide over a mossy cliff. The mother of the bride, in mid stage dementia bitched through the whole ceremony that she “Feared sand, was just not an outdoor Girl” A line I use to this day. I had to run down the trail several times to cue the string quartet..I cried till I laughed that day. Thanks Aussa- great post.

My sister and her husband got married this past June, and they’d been dating since my sister was a sophomore in high school. That was…ten years ago. Their wedding was painfully normal, but still sweet. I did get in my little bit as one of the Maids of Honor, by pointing out that she was my sister, and no one picks on my sister but me.

Hi Aussa, it’s me Mary aka PsiFiGal 🙂 I closed my blog… Anyway, I cried when I watched the show Married at First Sight. It was a social experiment, with a group of psychiatrists, a sex therapist and I can’t remember the others… They matched up 3 couples that were willing to get married without meeting the bride/groom first, like an arranged marriage. So far 2 of the couples are still together 🙂

Hey! I’d always recognize your Avatar 🙂 I’ve not heard of that show, but it sounds interesting. I used to say that I’d allow for an arranged marriage if Peeves, Sars, and my 2nd oldest brother were allowed to do the picking. Obviously I myself have historically been VERY bad at picking. Alex is a gloriously merciful anomaly 🙂

I cry at every-frickin’-thing. I watched the Paddington movie yesterday and when it concluded (spoilers – Paddington is NOT stuffed by Nicole Kidman), I felt this pain in my throat and tears in my eyes.

I took my nieces to see Mockingjay– which definitely traumatized them– and was trying to keep an eye on them and make sure they were okay but I’m pretty sure I choked up like 5 separate times. Damn you, violent YA movies!

I leave ONE WEEK and there are three new posts?! Anyway, when I was flipping through the channels once, a random couple got engaged in the 4.3 seconds I lingered to watch and I actually teared up. Funny because all that shiz usually repulses me.

And about that toast Sars gave…I sadly had the experience of falling love with an engaged guy last year though he barely knew my name.. I’m 110% over it now but he was my first heartbreak. Oh well.

Haha! That sounds like me, in the 4.3 seconds! I don’t know where this soft heart came from…

And I’m glad you’re over that guy! Plenty of decent human beings out there, they’re just more subtle than all the assholes. AND you have an experience under your belt that you can point to in the future and say “I survived that, I can survive this.” Is that too doom and gloomy? It works for me 😉

Loved the post–it’s so happy! I weep at weddings, too–so loudly that I have wisely removed myself to allow the vows to be heard.

My favorite wedding was one where the bride was the hospice nurse of the widower’s just-deceased wife. Wife number one had pre-chosen the nurse to be wife number two for her soon-to-be-widowed husband. It was a perfect match. Talk about weeping!

Honestly, it was only happy. The two made a wonderful couple–as he had with his first wife–and the wedding was held at the Wayfarers Chapel, which is so beautiful… Last I heard, they were still together and happy.