tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1011584436047448952017-04-27T01:16:51.179-06:00Russell and Bonnie Jack Family Blogrussell jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17601323487844796401noreply@blogger.comBlogger129125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-49352164070303963602012-08-08T16:04:00.001-06:002012-08-08T16:26:26.496-06:00My Back Surgery (L4-5 Discectomy)I haven't been much of a blogger lately. The few of you who know me and actually follow this blog will be shocked to see a post. But I am really writing this post for people I don't know, specifically for people who are having sciatic nerve pain and considering back surgery. When I was in this position, I scoured the internet for other people's experiences with back surgery. Most of the anecdotal reports that I found were horror stories. But every real-life person I talked to had a good story. So I am putting my good story on the internet, in the hopes that maybe a few people searching for answers will find some comfort in my experience.
<p>
I am 33 years old, and my back surgery (L4-5 discectomy) was over 3 months ago. My surgeon was <a href="http://www.utahneurologicalclinic.com/#!physicians" target="_blank">Dr. Lynn Gaufin</a>, and he did a perfect job. I knew my nerve pain was completely gone from the moment I woke up from surgery, because I could lie flat on my back without my legs going numb. It was amazing. I did a couple of months of rehab physical therapy, and while I still have occasional lower back pain, and my back is still really stiff and achy in the mornings, I am almost back to my normal activity level. I am so much better than I was before surgery. I know that the next few years are still crucial to determining the total "success" of my back surgery (because there is the possibility of a re-herniation), but for now I am calling it a success.
<p>
I am not advocating back surgery for everyone. Most back pain will resolve itself in about 6 weeks. And many people have herniated disks with few or no symptoms. So just because you are having back pain, or just because your MRI shows a herniated disk, does not mean you need surgery. However, I am convinced it was ultimately the best solution for me. Here's where I get super detailed and long-winded, so don't feel bad if you're too bored to go on. I'm hoping the details might help someone in a similar situation to mine.
<p>
My problems began in October of last year, as a sharp pain in my lower back, particularly when I bent to lift my 12-month-old baby out of his crib. I had had this sort of pain before, and it usually resolved itself in a week or two. But after a newborn <a href="http://www.bonniejack.com/" target="_blank">photoshoot</a> I did one day, I found myself unable to stand straight. The next few days were a blur of pain. I discovered that if I could force my body straight (a nauseatingly painful process), the pain would be nearly gone while I stood on my feet. Sitting down brought on sharp pains in my legs, but again, once I sat for several seconds, the pain would mostly subside. After a few days of this, and the agony every time I had to change position (riding in the car was particularly painful, from the jarring motion of the car to getting out at the end of the ride), I became desperate for help. But I didn't know who to go to for help! A doctor? A chiropractor? A physical therapist? <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Healing-Back-Pain-Mind-Body-Connection/dp/0446392308" target="_blank">Emotional counseling?</a>There is a huge amount of information on the internet, and all of it seems to come down to one truth: no one really understands back pain. The best resource I eventually found was <a href="http://www.spine-health.com/" target="_blank">spine-health.com</a>. Don't waste your time on too many other websites (especially blogs, where you'll just find anecdotal evidence that may or may not be at all useful....)
<p>
So I finally tried a physical therapist, but man, did I go to the wrong one. I picked the cheapest guy in town. He figured it was my SI joint. He put me in traction. Ouch! I was so much worse the next day! After one more appointment with him, I reached a day where I literally could not get out of bed. Lying curled on my side was painful, but any kind of movement in any direction caused shooting pain down my legs to my toes. 1600 mg of ibuprofen did nothing. I finally dragged myself and my baby to the car and got to my doctor's office. He gave me some muscle relaxers, which started working within the hour. Hooray. I was finally able to function. I could sit and stand without excruciating pain. My doctor also sent me to a better physical therapist, who I really liked, but who couldn't fix me. She gave me exercises and we did stretches and e-stim, but after about 6 weeks I wasn't getting any better. At this point the pain, while on muscle relaxers 24-7, was mostly a dull ache with occasional painful spasms.
<p>
I decided to try a chiropractor. Again, I really liked him, but he couldn't fix me. He adjusted everything he could, and even had his massage therapist really work hard on my piriformis muscle (in case that was pinching my sciatic nerve). He had me get x-rays in case I had some <a href="http://www.spine-health.com/conditions/spondylolisthesis/isthmic-spondylolisthesis" target="_blank">spondylolisthesis</a> thingy. The pain in my legs was turning into numbness and tingling that was worst when my body was straight (lying down or standing). I was turning into one of those bent-over old people, leaning on my grocery cart. After 6 weeks of treatment it finally came down to, "well, you should be better by now. Maybe you'd better get an MRI, so we can see if it is a herniated disk. But whatever you do, DON'T LET THOSE DOCTORS TALK YOU INTO SURGERY!"
<p>
So I went to an orthopedic specialist. He immediately ordered an MRI which showed a very large <a href="http://www.spine-health.com/conditions/herniated-disc/lumbar-herniated-disc" target="_blank">herniated disk</a>. He said my two choices were 1)surgery, or 2)no surgery. The second choice came with a "we can try a cortisone shot. It might work." So I tried the cortisone shot. The morning before I went to go get the shot, I turned over in bed and tweaked something that caused a horrible burning pins and needles sensation all down my right leg. The shot didn't work. Not even a little bit.
<p>
So this is the point at which I decided surgery was my best option, after 5 months of pain that kept increasing, and after trying every other option (besides alternative therapies, which I was open to, but out of patience). I was completely hunched over any time I tried to stand on my feet, and even then, could only stand for a few minutes at a time before the burning, numbness, and pain in my legs became unbearable and I had to sit down. I couldn't take care of my two kids. I was basically useless, and I say that with the utmost respect for people who live without the use of their legs, and do so very gracefully. I don't know how they do it. I'm sure it's harder than I can possibly imagine. I decided, after doing some research and talking to others who had done surgery, to use a neurosurgeon rather than an orthopedic surgeon. I called up Dr. Gaufin's office and they got me in the next day, based on my medical records and symptoms. My surgery was 3 weeks later, approximately 6 months after my initial pain began. I had an L4-5 <a href="http://www.spine-health.com/treatment/back-surgery/microdiscectomy-microdecompression-spine-surgery" target="_blank">discectomy</a>, which means they shaved off the herniated portion of the disk between the L4 and L5 vertebrae (the link goes to info about a "<i>micro</i>discectomy," which I'm not totally sure if I had--my incision was about 2 inches). Since the actual pain in my back was minor compared to the nerve pain in my legs, they did not fuse the vertebrae. This means I will probably always have a moderate amount of back pain, because the disk is damaged and not providing a good cushion between the vertebrae. But like I said before, my nerve pain was immediately gone after the surgery and hasn't returned, and that is good enough for me.
<p>
Some thoughts about my recovery. It was about 4 weeks before I could lift my 25-pound baby. I wish I had taken 2 weeks off work instead of just one&mdash;and I only work 12 hours a week. If I had been working full time, I would have still struggled to return after 2 weeks. If you have the option of completely taking off 2 weeks and then working part time for 2 more, that might be ideal--although that is understandably unrealistic. Same goes for help with kids&mdash;if you can get someone to stay with you for 2 weeks, do it. My mom stayed for one week, which was awesome, but I was still kind of useless for the next few weeks. I had to put my 18-month old in a regular bed instead of a crib, which he wasn't really ready for. I also had to call a neighbor to put him in his carseat anytime I wanted to go anywhere. And he learned really quickly that I couldn't chase him or grab him if he wanted to cause trouble. So that was tough for a few weeks.
<p>One other thing about my recovery physical therapist, Von Hill at Peak Physical Therapy here in Spanish Fork, Utah. If you live in my area, I absolutely recommend Peak and especially Von. I am confident if I had gone to him in the first place instead of the cheapo guy I went to, he would have been able to immediately tell me I had a herniated disk, and he would have given me the best therapy possible. I'm not saying I would have avoided surgery, but I honestly think he would have been my best chance.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-4197475222285668422011-08-25T22:07:00.005-06:002011-08-25T22:22:39.650-06:00New Tricks3 short videos. I know 30 seconds is about all I can expect you to watch. :)
<p>
Here is Dexter's newest trick. I have a similar video of Dorian when he was a baby. It's an important milestone. (Also, I think Dorian's monologue in the background is kind of adorable. I think he knew he was being recorded and was trying to think of stuff to say.)<br>
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxUIsvWANZ7C4uPJQ4kTeSswP2mttjlQ6AD9MRsqHkky3PBGpdeKaHjftVNsj5c6XoAA2DF06qd34BeH85AAQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' /></p><p>
Next trick. Yes, I am getting this kid into a gymnastics class. (And I could have edited the video to be a bit shorter, but I thought Dexter in the background was kind of cute, so if you get bored of Dorian just watch Dexter...)<br>
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwNYs2H1cSTCWjZG1JuPXrffyIFNxykR8iOP88xKhMwwc1WdRkhNaRh34YA0Bv8klQax-0y1F0dMD6b8hJUbw' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' /></p><p>
Last one. I uploaded one like this a while ago to facebook, but this one is even better. I just think these brothers are cute.<br>
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dzQOfPHg0r1UxMuyyBBLWGYHa3mS2Spmdw2ouSDZdOZtvZdWhtjEiPY2ZTBjsVLSSPemnkvurlO0kPbmdCDxA' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' />
</p>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-11015525736677750762011-06-16T13:01:00.004-06:002011-06-16T13:07:14.011-06:00help again?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-48RTq9tW8Ac/TfpTvaqF1GI/AAAAAAAAA0I/KRLmRx2SAFw/s1600/_boys%2Bsepia%2B5x7%2Blandscape.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 229px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-48RTq9tW8Ac/TfpTvaqF1GI/AAAAAAAAA0I/KRLmRx2SAFw/s320/_boys%2Bsepia%2B5x7%2Blandscape.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5618895559172936802" /></a>
Seems like I only use this blog to ask for advice these days....
<p>
Dorian will be 3 in a few weeks. He is still adjusting to his baby brother who is now 8 months old. But it seems in the last month or so he has gotten very aggressive with Dexter. From the beginning, I think Dorian viewed little Dexter both as a threat and as a toy. And now that the baby is crawling and pulling up on things, Dorian is 1)even more threatened because the baby can get his toys, and 2)seeing Dexter as even more of a fun "plaything" because he can do more things now.
<p>
I know aggression between two close brothers is normal, but I am actually worried for the safety of the baby! Dorian does things like knock Dexter down when he has pulled himself up on the coffee table, or lie on top of him, or try to pick him up, or throw toys at him, or forcefully put things in his mouth. Dorian seems to get over-excited when he interacts with Dexter&mdash;he gets right in his face and screams, or pinches his cheeks, or buzzes his lips so that he spits all over Dexter.
<p>
I have talked to Dorian about how his little brother is not a toy, but a person with feelings and rights. We have talked about how he might feel if someone were to scream at him, or pinch him, or spit on him. I have tried to spend extra alone time with Dorian while the baby is sleeping. I have sent him to timeout 1000 times for hurting the baby. I have praised him for good interactions with the baby. What else can I try? I know he loves his baby brother, but he obviously doesn't feel like he has power over his world right now.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-66319886453209207952011-04-06T22:01:00.004-06:002011-04-06T22:27:53.802-06:00Um...I need help...Right, so here is the potty training rundown:
<p>
Dorian has been out of diapers for 5 weeks now. He did great the first 3 weeks as long as I reminded him to go periodically (we had treats and a fun iPhone app and all that). He had a little trouble with the pooping, but we finally bribed him to do that (Thomas trains and matchbox cars). Then it started becoming a power struggle (he absolutely wouldn't go if i asked him to). I figured that was normal and he just needed me to stay out of it, so I stopped reminding him to go. He had a few accidents, but then actually started telling me when he needed to go, and for about 3 days i thought we were almost done. <p>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r3Nkm8zyxUg/TZ05CR-UyoI/AAAAAAAAAz8/GOGWs_DXsLg/s1600/IMG_0777.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r3Nkm8zyxUg/TZ05CR-UyoI/AAAAAAAAAz8/GOGWs_DXsLg/s320/IMG_0777.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5592689023611357826" /></a>
But then, since he wouldn't go when I asked (like right before leaving the house), he started having accidents in the car, or while I was feeding Dexter or taking a shower and couldn't help him. I started taking away the trains he had earned whenever he had an accident. I didn't make a big deal out of it or try to make him feel bad, I just told him I was putting Thomas or Spencer back up on the wall. He seemed to understand why I was doing it, and how to earn them back, and didn't seem overly distressed about it.
<p>
But then I guess I started making a bigger deal out of him going <i>by himself</i> because I needed him to be able to go when I couldn't help him (and for the record, I knew he could do it by himself; I usually just sit by and watch when I am "helping" him). Maybe that was what ruined it? Because now, for about the past week and a half, he has just completely stopped going in the potty (unless grandma asks, he'll go for her!). Five accidents today, including one involving sticky poop (as opposed to the non-sticky kind, you know...sorry...TMI). Not a single success (oh, unless you count when he went for Grandma!). He knows what an accident is, and he will even sit in the bathroom after he gets cleaned up and count on his fingers "One: go in the potty, two: by myself, three: no accidents" (those are the 3 criteria I have given him for earning his Thomas and Spencer trains back). I don't get upset with him when he has an accident, I just clean him up and remind him to go in the potty next time. I think he knows what needs to be done, but is just pushing against any kind of control. I think.
<p>
I have asked him if he would rather just wear diapers, and he says no. He likes to wear underwear. But I did actually put him back in diapers for a couple of days last week and he didn't complain at all. In fact, he seemed a little more relaxed. I know every kid is different and all that, but I'd love to hear how you handled things with your potty-training kids (unless it's one of those, "she just climbed on the potty one day and we never went back to diapers" kind of stories...I don't need to hear those :) and how you dealt with similar challenges. Should I just go back to diapers for a few months and then try again? Or is it possible that we're getting really close and I should just hang in there?bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-37944754472599696942011-04-05T22:59:00.003-06:002011-04-28T22:26:36.903-06:00Dexter wants an iPhoneDexter, 5 months 23 days:<p>
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dxVK_d9II0nbYcDRXLqNnX7q8vQz2rvJIUSEv5pJK0s_-O9QXKf5LVwreJkI1X04laLGxw1VG-rXuc-fCxfOQ' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' />
<a href="http://russellandbonniejack.blogspot.com/2009/01/sometimes-you-just-need-right.html" target="_blank">(Does it remind you of anyone?)</a>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-41580572118261063112011-02-07T11:12:00.001-07:002011-02-07T11:14:19.137-07:00Dorian needs more money<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dwc8fDHlucP73SUeV7XywDX7VvxkeCIqQG-FntNxBpK2eSP7UFQ0DAf4C5CxxDP7w_JB1l2pyha5UTbLYJ79A' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' />bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-26181147598616363422011-01-07T15:10:00.003-07:002011-01-07T15:25:53.700-07:00Parenting with Love and LogicDorian loves his little brother. He loves to hold him, and pat him, and kiss him, and he is always sharing his cars with him. But. He doesn't love sharing his mom. Really hates it, in fact. He constantly wants me to play with him, hold him, carry him, help him....this from the kid who just a few months ago didn't want help with anything. My number one strategy for getting him to do what I wanted was, "do you want to do it by yourself, or do you want me to do it for you?" "By taself!" Fortunately this worked for my whole pregnancy, when I had zero energy&mdash;but it hardly ever works now, and really backfires when he wants me to carry him while I'm also carrying a baby in a carseat, a diaper bag, and everybody's jackets. Don't even get me started on the grocery store.
<p>
Combine this new-found clinginess with a defiant streak a mile wide, and an exhausted set of parents who are overwhelmed by the requirements of two children (how do people have more than 2? don't answer that)...and I finally decided to pull out <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Parenting-Love-Logic-Teaching-Responsibility/dp/0891093117" target="_blank">Parenting with Love and Logic</a>, which my sister Lorinda gave to me while I was pregnant with Dorian. I read it, liked it, and have been applying some of it with some success, but I need to think through it some more, and also summarize it for Russell so that he doesn't have to read it. :) So here are the main points, in case anyone else also doesn't want to read it (I'm trying hard not to write a book myself...sorry this is so long...):
<p>
Love and Logic is about allowing kids to experience the logical consequences of their behavior (as opposed to artificially imposed made-up consequences). This teaches kids responsibility because they learn to think for themselves instead of always being told what to do and how to act. They learn which behaviors are effective and which aren't, while gaining confidence in their own ability to choose and think.
<h3>Responsibility</h3>
We have 18 years to help our kids become responsible adults. We start by allowing them to learn to solve their own problems and take responsibility for their own choices. Obviously we can't let a 2-year old make every decision in his life, but we can let him make a lot of them. Which shirt would you like to wear? Do you want to wear a jacket? (he won't freeze to death if he doesn't, and you can bring it along in case he changes his mind&mdash;or not, to really drive the point home) What would you like for lunch? etc. More on choices later, but the point is that kids need lots of practice making choices so that when they get older and the choices get harder, they will be able to think for themselves in a mature and sensible way.
<p>
Two ineffective parenting styles:<p>
<b>Helicopter Parents</b>: These parents hover over their children and rescue them from every problem. They feel like they are saving their children from unnecessary pain, but instead they are robbing their children of important learning experiences, and setting them up for a lot more pain when the learning experiences are a lot bigger later on. These kids are not prepared to meet the consequences of real life, and don't know how to cope without the help of their parents.<p>
<b>Drill Sargeant Parents</b>: These parents feel that their job is to force their children to behave correctly, and that the children will continue to act right as adults out of habit. The problem is that since these children are never allowed to make any decisions for themselves, when they are presented with choices as teenagers and adults, they often make terrible decisions. They don't feel like they are thinking for themselves unless they make a decision that is completely opposite from what their parents would have decided for them.
<p>
We have to keep in mind that as we give our children the freedom to make choices and think for themselves, they will probably do things we don't approve of. I like this quote from page 27 of the book: "Just as God gave us a good mind and the ability to excel, He has given us the right, or at least the capability, to blow up the planet. However, a race capable of blowing up the planet is also capable of flying to Saturn. High success and high achievement carry with them the risks of abysmal losses. But the <i>loving</i> and <i>concerned</i> parents who allow for failure wind up with kids who tend to choose success."
<p>
Every learning experience a child is allowed to have today will save him from a more expensive learning experience tomorrow.
<h3>Self-Concept</h3>
Responsible kids feel good about themselves, and kids who feel good about themselves tend to be more responsible. Here is a great article from babycenter.com on <a href="http://www.babycenter.com/0_ten-ways-to-build-your-2-year-olds-self-esteem_64036.bc?scid=mbtw_post29m_1w:950&pe=2UypQhp" target="_blank">building a 2-year old's self esteem</a> (since that is the age I am most concerned with right now...) Unfortunately, we sometimes send our kids negative messages about themselves without even intending to. When we say things like "why would you do that?" or "what were you thinking?", we are really sending an implied message to our kids that they are kind of dumb, and not very capable. Our kids deserve just as much respect as adults, and they will feel better about themselves if we treat them like they are competent and intelligent, and show them that we love them unconditionally. I love this idea from page 39: "kids can't get better until we prove to them, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that they're good enough the way they are." Kids need to know we love them.
<p>
If we are constantly telling our children what to do or how to feel ("put on your jacket," "eat your dinner," "you're not really hungry," etc.) we are sending them the message that they can't think for themselves, and they need us to do it for them. Instead, we need to send them the message that they have the skills they need to handle life, and that they can make their own decisions.
<p>
As a side note, the book points out that kids learn just about everything by modeling, including self image. They watch the way we (their parents) make decisions, handle arguments, and solve problems, and they model their behavior after ours. This means, among other things, that they need to see us taking care of ourselves, so that they will learn to take care of themselves. If we always put ourselves last, we may end up with kids who don't think very highly of themselves.
<h3>Mistakes as Opportunities</h3>
When we automatically jump to rescue our children from their mistakes, we rob them of the opportunity to learn responsibility. Or when we get angry over their mistakes, we teach them that the "logical consequence of messing up is making adults mad," (p. 49) which doesn't give them any responsibility for the real problem. "The best solution to any problem lives within the skin of the person who owns the problem." (p. 49) As a teacher I have learned that the more energy I expend to solve a problem in a lesson, the less the student will worry about solving it. If I sit back and allow them to work it out, they will take responsibility for it. "Kids who deal directly with their own problems are moved to solve them." (p. 50)
<p>
There are only 2 times when we should step in to help our kids solve their problems:
<ol>
<li>When our children are in immediate physical danger.
<li>When the problem is really beyond the capacity of the child to deal with, and the consequences will be lifelong or otherwise too significant to simply teach a lesson. Be careful with this one, because "everything we fix for our kids, our kids will be unable to fix for themselves." (p. 51)
</ol>
<h3>Separation of Problems</h3>
If the child's problem is causing a problem for us, then we need to deal with it (so our children see us standing up for ourselves). Not by solving the problem for the child, but by giving them ownership of the problem. For instance, if the child is not taking care of their pet, that becomes a problem for us, but rather than feeding it and cleaning its cage for them, we could take the pet away [arrange for it stay at a neighbor's house for a day?] while the child considers how much they really want to own a pet (this does require having good neighbors, but you can probably return the favor in some way).<p>
<h3>Setting Limits with Thinking Words instead of Fighting Words</h3>
Kids need limits. They don't feel safe without them, and they will push against them until they know exactly where they are. We start building these limits for them from the time they are babies. These limits give them enough security to build self-confidence and deal effectively with their emotions. Children gain respect for parents who set and enforce good limits. However, if we attempt to set these limits with "fighting words" (i.e. "Stop whining!" or "Go practice the piano!") we are setting ourselves up for a control struggle. If we instead use "thinking words" (i.e. "You sound upset. I'll be glad to listen to you when your voice is calm like mine" or "Feel free to join us for dinner once your practicing is done"), we are still requiring respect and obedience, but also allowing our children the opportunity to think for themselves. Here is one of my favorite points in the book: "Fighting words invite disobedience. When we use them, <b>we draw a line in the sand and dare them to cross it</b>" (p. 65). And they will cross it.
<p>
Another way to use thinking words instead of fighting words is to use "yes" instead of "no" as often as possible. So rather than "no, you can't watch TV," say, "yes, you can watch TV as soon as your toys are picked up," etc. Then when the answer really is just "no," they are more likely to accept that as well.
<h3>Choices</h3>
Parents who want to control their children cannot win. The child will fight back. If the parent does manage to somehow retain control throughout the kid's childhood, that child will often make as many contrary decisions as possible once they are on their own. Control struggles leave parents feeling helpless, angry, and frustrated, and leave the child feeling defensive and unempowered. The way to avoid them is by offering choices&mdash;but this does require giving up some control. "We must give our children the control we don't need to keep the control we do" (p. 72). This doesn't mean giving your kids complete control (that creates brats), but it does mean recognizing which issues are yours to control and which aren't. Start by giving your toddlers a little control&mdash;over what to wear and how much of their dinner to eat. Give kids more and more control as they grow&mdash;which sport to play and how to spend their allowances. By the time they are graduating from high school, they should be responsible enough to be making basically every decision in their lives. As long as their control over their lives is always expanding, they will be satisfied with the control they have. If you give them too much at first and then have to reign them in, that will be painful for everyone. Here's a good <a href="http://www.babycenter.com/0_resistance-what-to-do-about-the-endless-nos_63741.bc?scid=mbtw_post28m_3w:934&pe=2UypQhp" target="_blank">article from babycenter on giving kids choices.</a>
<p>
There are some things you just can't make a kid do. You can't make them eat, you can't make them sleep, you can't make them use the toilet. You can, however, give them opportunities to eat, sleep, and use the bathroom&mdash;and actually, the less control you try to exert in these situations, the more likely they are to do what you would like them to do (I've noticed this with Dorian at the dinner table&mdash;anytime he feels coerced to eat, he won't touch it, even if it's something I know he likes. But if I let him choose what goes on his plate, and if I don't make a big deal out of whether he eats it, he will usually eat, and even try something new).
<p>
You also can't make a child learn, and you can't make him believe what you believe. You can only give him opportunities to learn, and model how your beliefs make you happier. You can teach, but you can't force learning, and you can model, but you can't force belief.
<p>
Some points to remember:
<ol>
<li>Make sure you are always prepared to follow through with the choices you offer (don't say "hurry up or we're leaving without you" unless you have a babysitter arranged--p.s. if the child chooses to stay with the babysitter, they need to understand that they are also choosing to pay the babysitter)
<li>There is always a third choice, which is that the parent will decide. The child needs to understand that this is what will happen if they don't choose for themselves.
<li>Don't worry about what other people think. If they're judging you, who cares? Is it more important to impress some random people at McDonald's, or to build a lasting relationship with your child that is based on trust and responsibility? It's not going to be easy; there will be resistance and opposition. Be ready for it, and don't get worked up about it.
<li>Don't turn the choice into a threat&mdash;"you can clean these toys up or you can have a timeout" is not the most effective choice. "Would you rather pick up the cars or trains first?" Or even, "would you rather pick up your own toys or hire me to do it?"
<li>Be positive in your delivery&mdash;"You're welcome to ______ or ______" or "Would you rather _______ or _______"
<li>Don't nag while the child is making up his mind. Don't remind him again and again what the consequences will be. Expect him to hear and understand the first time, and he will.
<li>Don't give warnings and second chances. Follow through the first time and every time on the consequences the child has chosen.
</ol>
<h3>Empathy</h3>
When you do have to enforce some less than pleasant consequences, don't lecture your kids; don't tell them what they just learned. They will learn it more effectively if they think through it themselves. As much as possible, let the natural consequences of their behavior teach the lesson (i.e. if they choose not to wear a jacket, let them realize how cold they are and they will probably decide to choose differently next time). But go ahead and offer empathy: "yeah, I'm cold too when I don't wear a jacket." And leave it at that.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-51779616288096395292010-12-09T20:59:00.008-07:002010-12-09T22:51:53.381-07:00This is My Life<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TQGlucXce4I/AAAAAAAAAzg/WhSted5ykVU/s1600/_bonnies%2Blife.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TQGlucXce4I/AAAAAAAAAzg/WhSted5ykVU/s320/_bonnies%2Blife.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5548898433204255618" /><br /><small style="display: block; text-align: center; margin-top: -20px;">(Click for larger view)</small></a>
<br />
<p>
This was supposed to be a throw-away photo, one that Russell took while trying out his new umbrellas and 85mm lens (we opened Christmas early). But it turned out to be such a perfect portrait of my life right now.
<p>
Dexter has just finished eating and is happy as can be (click on the photo twice to see the bubble on his tongue). I think this is his first smile we have captured in a photo.
<p>
Dorian is insistent about sitting in my lap ("I wanna be two boys"). His hair is crazy, he's not wearing pants, and he's a little awed by the new camera equipment his dad is playing with (bee-lellas!).
<p>
I'm a little mad, a little tired, a little fat, and a little depressed, but I really do love cuddling with my two boys.
<p>
This is my life, and its...good.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-35586068216711858872010-10-19T17:00:00.000-06:002010-10-19T17:10:17.529-06:00Leaving the HouseI know, moms with 3 or more kids do this every day. They get themselves ready, get everyone else ready, pack everyone (and everything) into the car, and leave the house. They get things done, like grocery shopping and dentist appointments.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hh_uShfI/AAAAAAAAAzQ/oE8jMVjJ2FQ/s1600/looking+at+mom-regular.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hh_uShfI/AAAAAAAAAzQ/oE8jMVjJ2FQ/s320/looking+at+mom-regular.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5529894260382533106" /></a>
<center><small>Sweetest baby ever?</small></center>
I haven't graduated to that level yet. All I had to do was take baby Dexter to the hospital for a little blood test. I didn't even have to take Dorian with me; he was going to play at Grandma's house (yay for grandmas).
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hhbQvLII/AAAAAAAAAzI/Z9c1MLHY3OM/s1600/grandpa+john+and+dexter.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hhbQvLII/AAAAAAAAAzI/Z9c1MLHY3OM/s320/grandpa+john+and+dexter.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5529894250594905218" /></a>
<center><small>Grandpa John and Dexter</small></center>
But it went something like this: Wake up at 8 a.m. (wow, this baby is a good sleeper! and Russell kept Dorian occupied even though he was up at 6:45 (yay for husbands)). Feed the sweetest baby ever. Put him down for a nap. Pick him back up again because he is starting to want to be rocked to sleep, instead of sort of being in a constant state of sleep. Put him back down once he is really asleep. Pick him up and rock him one more time, this time getting the bubble out of his tummy. Put him back down.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hg3ICpEI/AAAAAAAAAzA/F2TjfLcdy-U/s1600/evan+and+dexter.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hg3ICpEI/AAAAAAAAAzA/F2TjfLcdy-U/s320/evan+and+dexter.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5529894240894755906" /></a>
<center><small>Evan and Dexter</small></center>
Notice that it is 9:30 a.m. and think, I can still get in the shower and be ready by 10 (ha). Call Grandma and tell her to come get Dorian at 10. Take a quick shower. Get out of the shower and remember that Dorian doesn't feed or dress himself. And he needs some train tracks built. Play with Dorian. Meet Grandma at the door and hand her the baby so you can actually get Dorian dressed. See them out the door. Realize that the baby is hungry.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hghIR1mI/AAAAAAAAAy4/wdcVtR3pYSw/s1600/ashley+and+dexter.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 214px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hghIR1mI/AAAAAAAAAy4/wdcVtR3pYSw/s320/ashley+and+dexter.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5529894234990171746" /></a>
<center><small>Ashley and Dexter</small></center>
Feed the baby. Change his diaper. Decide to take him outside for a few minutes of sunshine before getting him dressed. Remember that you haven't packed a diaper bag for this little one, and you sent your other diaper bag with the big one. Spend a moment in thought over the logistics of carrying two diaper bags. And a purse. Pack a diaper bag. Pack the baby in the carseat (these straps don't pull tight enough? help!). Realize that you're still not wearing any makeup, and now your hair has dried without being styled. Forget the hair, do the makeup. Get in the car and pull out of the driveway. At 11:15. Really?
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hlb4JrWI/AAAAAAAAAzY/FZMj0YxT23s/s1600/sweet+baby.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 214px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TL4hlb4JrWI/AAAAAAAAAzY/FZMj0YxT23s/s320/sweet+baby.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5529894319479696738" /></a>
<center><small>Mom and Dexter</small></center>
I had gotten into a routine with Dorian where I always gave myself 15 extra minutes just to get into the car after I had everything else ready, because somehow between brushing teeth and spiking hair and convincing a toddler to move, it usually took about that much extra time. So now what, I have to give myself an extra hour and 15 minutes? And people do this with more kids? I think I'll stay home for a while. :)bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-45471444007951114752010-10-14T21:48:00.008-06:002010-11-15T21:17:46.934-07:00Christmas Wish ListI'm putting this on my blog so my family can see it, but if any of the rest of you want to buy us stuff, go right ahead!
<p>
<b>Bonnie</b>
<ul>
<li>clothes (jeans that fit...why is this on my list every year?, sweaters, hoodies, long shirts, socks)
<li>lotions (coconut lime verbena, midnight pomegranate, white citrus)
<li> candles (yummy fall/christmas flavors, or light fruity summer scents)
<li> <a href="http://www.fetchbook.info/showWishlist.do?userId=17459" target="_blank">books</a>
<li> iTunes gift card
<li> <a href="http://www.quiltbug.com/articles/microwave-bag.htm" target="_blank">rice bag</a>
</ul>
<b>Russell</b>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Canon-85mm-f1-2L-Lens-Cameras/dp/B000EW9Y4M" target="_blank">85mm 1.2L</a>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Canon-35mm-1-4L-Angle-Cameras/dp/B00009R6WY" target="_blank">35mm 1.4L</a>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Canon-70-200mm-II-Telephoto-Cameras/dp/B0033PRWSW/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1289879993&sr=8-6" target="_blank">70-200mm 2.8L IS II</a>
<li><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Westcott-2001-Optical-Collapsible-Umbrella/dp/B00009UTZA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=electronics&qid=1289880122&sr=1-1" target="_blank">Westcott white satin 43" umbrella</a> (wants 2...)
<li> <a href="http://www.flowbee.com/" target="_blank">flowbee</a> or a <a href="http://www.amazon.com/12-Guide-Comb-2in-Black/dp/B00065XNW6" target="_blank">#12 Wahl Clipper Guide Comb</a> (he really wants the flowbee...)
<li> iTunes gift card
<li> <a href="http://store.apple.com/us/browse/home/holidayhome/lp2?afid=p219|GOUS&cid=OAS-US-KWG-LP2" target="_blank">Apple products</a>...maybe an <a href="http://store.apple.com/us/browse/home/shop_ipod/family/ipod_shuffle?mco=MTk5MDM3Mzc" target="_blank">iPod Shuffle</a> or an Apple mousepad (yeah, I haven't been able to find one)
</ul>
<b>Dorian</b>
<ul>
<li>shoes (toddler size 7)
<li>books
<li>DVDs (Toy Story, Finding Nemo, Meet the Robinsons, Up, Lilo and Stitch, Emperor's New Groove, Kung Fu Panda, Over the Hedge, Chicken Run...ok, I'm getting carried away)
<li>cars, buses, trucks, trains, airplanes
</ul>
<b>Dexter</b>
<ul>
<li>clothes?
<li>books?
</ul>
<b>Family</b>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/product.asp?SKU=14489118" target="_blank">body fat scale</a>
<li><a href="http://www.bedbathandbeyond.com/product.asp?SKU=119100&COL=410&RN=273&" target="_blank">bath towels</a>
<li> salad plates...something like <a href="http://www.target.com/Reactive-Glaze-16-pc-Dinnerware-Set/dp/B002IB3ZU6/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&searchView=grid5&keywords=blue dinnerware&fromGsearch=true&sr=1-1&qid=1289880377&rh=&searchRank=target104545&id=Reactive Glaze 16-pc Dinnerware Set&node=1038576|1287991011&searchSize=30&searchPage=1&searchNodeID=1038576|1287991011&searchBinNameList=subjectbin%2Cprice%2Ctarget_com_primary_color-bin%2Ctarget_com_size-bin%2Ctarget_com_brand-bin&frombrowse=0" target="_blank">this</a> or <a href="http://www.target.com/Essex-32-pc-Dining-Set-Cobalt/dp/B000HCSX14/ref=sc_qi_detailbutton" target="_blank">this</a> but we don't need the whole set...just some salad plates...
</ul>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-6047352375806825062010-10-10T20:42:00.003-06:002010-10-10T20:49:39.537-06:00Maternity Photo ShootWe decided to go ahead and take some maternity pictures, since I'm having a baby in two and a half days and today was pretty much our last chance. Plus Russell is excited about his new photography equipment.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5o1YtDXI/AAAAAAAAAyY/-rQbUJ63A9M/s1600/_bonnie+brick.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 213px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5o1YtDXI/AAAAAAAAAyY/-rQbUJ63A9M/s320/_bonnie+brick.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5526613435169443186" /></a>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5pDhfB2I/AAAAAAAAAyg/7helKzShOmw/s1600/_bonnie+solo.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 213px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5pDhfB2I/AAAAAAAAAyg/7helKzShOmw/s320/_bonnie+solo.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5526613438964369250" /></a>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5pQ-OdvI/AAAAAAAAAyo/GJWW2HayG08/s1600/_bonnie-dorian-brick.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 213px; height: 320px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5pQ-OdvI/AAAAAAAAAyo/GJWW2HayG08/s320/_bonnie-dorian-brick.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5526613442574579442" /></a>
Russell took all the other pictures, but I took this one. Handsome little guy, no?
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5p39rg5I/AAAAAAAAAyw/zbb9T-mP2yE/s1600/_dorian+brick.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 213px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TLJ5p39rg5I/AAAAAAAAAyw/zbb9T-mP2yE/s320/_dorian+brick.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5526613453041271698" /></a>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-57824713269530682652010-08-17T22:35:00.000-06:002010-08-17T22:39:00.575-06:00What I Did This SummerTo make up for not blogging all summer, I have been inspired by my sister-in-law <a href="http://lottiebird.blogspot.com/2010/08/my-summer-essay.html" target="_blank">Cindy</a> to write my summer essay. But since I'm not being graded on my essay form, I'm gonna do it in a list. So, here is what I did this summer:
<ul>
<li>Pulled all the weeds in the backyard
<li>Tilled the backyard (okay, I picked up rocks while Russell and some others did the tilling)
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtdwhdTyhI/AAAAAAAAAyA/8KqUUJ8FBmA/s1600/DSC05094-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtdwhdTyhI/AAAAAAAAAyA/8KqUUJ8FBmA/s320/DSC05094-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506598057586969106" /></a>
<li>Put a <a href="http://russellandbonniejack.blogspot.com/2010/06/things-we-should-have-known.html" target="_blank">dump truck</a> in the lawn
<li>Got a new <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Canon-Digital-Rebel-Camera-Body/dp/B0012Y88QQ" target="_blank">camera</a>--I'm gonna go ahead and use this as my excuse for not blogging, since Russell has been uploading all the pictures to his computer, and I no longer have easy access to them...
<li>Planted some trees (yeah, had to dig out this old concrete canal first)
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtfUWseg6I/AAAAAAAAAyI/P-SwMgTXdLA/s1600/IMG_0226-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtfUWseg6I/AAAAAAAAAyI/P-SwMgTXdLA/s320/IMG_0226-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506599772684714914" /></a>
<li>Planted some strawberries
<li>Went to Ginelle's high school graduation
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtcMRNuLoI/AAAAAAAAAxo/xbTpXZRf6MI/s1600/ginelle+graduating-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtcMRNuLoI/AAAAAAAAAxo/xbTpXZRf6MI/s320/ginelle+graduating-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506596335239704194" /></a>
<li>Went to St. George with some good friends
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtceH3nhpI/AAAAAAAAAxw/xG5dcVYReRU/s1600/hiking-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtceH3nhpI/AAAAAAAAAxw/xG5dcVYReRU/s320/hiking-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506596641968719506" /></a>
<li>Welcomed <a href="http://mikeandrindy.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Lorinda's</a> new baby Lyndee
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtbR8q-VaI/AAAAAAAAAxg/z1jv-oFxGuI/s1600/IMG_1931-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtbR8q-VaI/AAAAAAAAAxg/z1jv-oFxGuI/s320/IMG_1931-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506595333292840354" /></a>
<li>Went to Hawaii for my parents' 50th anniversary
<center><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/russj117/4873961542/" title="Post PCC by russj117, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4140/4873961542_b348de6d08.jpg" width="222" height="333" alt="Post PCC" /></a></center>
<li>Celebrated Dorian's 2nd birthday (hmmm....pics on Russell's computer)
<li>Pulled the backyard weeds again
<li>Neglected the front yard
<li>Taught some piano lessons
<li>Played at the park
<li>Blogged on my <a href="http://theteachingstudio.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">piano teaching blog</a>
<li>Played at the <a href="http://myrthapoolsusa.com/news/press/award-winning-projects-2009-recreation-management/payson-city-aquatic-center-and-skatepark-payson-utah1.php" target="_blank">swimming pool</a>
<li>Went to the <a href="http://www.thanksgivingpoint.com/visit/farm_country/about/location_and_hours.html" target="_blank">petting zoo</a>
<li>Got huge (I don't even think we have any pictures of this)
<li>Sat and watched while Russell dug some trenches in our rock-hard dirt
<li>Tried to help finish digging trenches with a trowel
<li>Tried to keep Dorian from filling the trenches back in as fast as I could scoop the dirt out
<li>Killed the AC in my car
<li>Pulled about a zillion rocks out of my backyard (this picture was taken early in the process...)
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtdwYl43_I/AAAAAAAAAx4/FiVWuWbzN7I/s1600/DSC05093-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/TGtdwYl43_I/AAAAAAAAAx4/FiVWuWbzN7I/s320/DSC05093-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5506598055207034866" /></a>
<li>Got the <a href="http://www.jimsautoutah.com/" target="_blank">AC in my car fixed!</a> (oh my gosh I love Jim's Auto)
<li>Went to Russell's 10-year high school reunion (I stole a pic from a friend's blog, but I am trying to upload 113 photos to Walgreens right now, so it isn't uploading...besides the fact that I should probably ask permission before using it...Ashley?)
<li>Let the strawberries die
<li>Kept the trees alive
<li>Let my father-in-law engineer and build our whole sprinkler system
<li>Bought a mattress for Dorian
</ul>
So, that about covers it. There seems to be an end in sight to the backyard project, and we are hoping to get the sod in within the next...month...or so. We're also excited about Dorian's <a href="http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/20120582" target="_blank">new bed</a>, which is out of stock. And we need to decide where that new baby is going to sleep. Oh, and also what to name him.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-3832299180756797782010-06-22T10:12:00.004-06:002010-06-22T10:34:57.279-06:00Things We Should Have KnownSometimes when you look back on lessons you've learned, it's hard to understand how you didn't already know better. Like, when you think about whether or not it is a good idea to drive a really <i>small</i> dump truck on your lawn. I mean, the truck only weighs about 13 tons, and is only carrying about 5 tons of dirt...it'll be fine, right?
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Oh, well. Sometimes it's hard to laugh at yourself, when you realize that the free dirt you thought you were getting from your neighbors just cost you a whole lot of extra time and money. At least we got to know the neighbors...
<p>
P.S. if you live in the Spanish Fork area and ever need a really good tow truck, we had a great experience with <a href="http://maps.google.com/maps/place?oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&ie=UTF-8&q=801-362-4001&fb=1&gl=us&hq=801-362-4001&hnear=Spanish+Fork,+UT&cid=9276699660721777053" target="_blank">Bang Up Towing</a>. They showed up after hours, super quick, and the price was very reasonable.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-53824976251659760872010-05-06T13:50:00.000-06:002010-05-06T13:57:08.459-06:00Hogle ZooWe went to the zoo on my birthday with several of my sisters and some of their kids. Not so much because it was my birthday, but because it was spring break and a nice day. It was just a bonus for me to be able to spend the day with my sisters and their cute kids. First, we stopped to see the elephants. It was fun to see Dorian grasp the concept of a mom and a baby animal.
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This is my sister Marilee with her granddaughter, Stella. I love those chubby cheeks!
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Out of all the things at the zoo, Dorian was most interested in the snow that was still on the ground. He had to stop and kick just about every clump we came to.
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He also liked the giraffes with their long necks.
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There's that cute baby Stella again.
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My silly nieces took a break in the stroller while the babies weren't using it.
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I really did have a stroller with me, but it was sort of hard to keep Dorian in it.
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More snow...
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My very pregnant sister, Lorinda.
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Ooh, puddles are almost as good as snow. Maybe even better, since they get my pants and shoes wet and muddy and that drives my mom a bit crazy.
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See that look of delight after he has completely soaked his bottom half?
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My sister-in-law Cindy with her two cute boys, and another who belongs to Lorinda. The boys were a little bored by the animals, but kind of fascinated by the people. You get some weird ones at the zoo. (Not excluding us...)
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Me and Dorian. :)
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As we were leaving, I sat him up on the wall in front of the waterfall. And then, of course, he didn't want to get down...
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...and had a tantrum when I told him it was really time to go.
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Exhausted kiddo, he was asleep minutes after we got in the car. Spilled goldfish crackers everywhere before we got home. :)
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S98wfDHQI_I/AAAAAAAAAwo/-HtvE8_TjHE/s1600/DSC05056-small.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S98wfDHQI_I/AAAAAAAAAwo/-HtvE8_TjHE/s320/DSC05056-small.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5467141782620873714" border="0" /></a>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-16240636794167461442010-04-30T14:12:00.007-06:002010-04-30T14:22:53.085-06:00Parking LotSo, the space between the groups of 2 and 3 black keys on the piano turns out to be the perfect size for parking cars! This is a common sight at our house:
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He loves cars and he loves to crash (currently pronounced "prash") them.
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He was pretty upset, though, when he discovered that his Lightning McQueen was too big to fit between the keys. :)
<p>
P.S. I guess I'm kind of weird about announcements. That, and I wanted to see if anyone was really reading my blog anymore. :) But yeah, I'm due October 19th. I think it's a girl, because this pregnancy has so far been really nice. I've been a little sick, but nothing like last time. I could maybe even do this again!bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-48757756209242750762010-04-29T15:00:00.000-06:002010-04-29T15:07:08.230-06:00Easter Egg HuntWe braved the rain and the cold to go to the Spanish Fork Easter Egg Hunt on April 3rd. So did about 1000 other people, but I was really impressed at how well organized it was. They had a separate field just for kids 2 and under, so Dorian didn't get trampled by any bigger kids. This is right when we got there, before he really knew what was going on.
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We successfully explained to him that he was going to go pick up eggs on the field, but he didn't understand why he couldn't do it right NOW. Poor kiddo. He was in tears before they could finish counting down.
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(On another note, when I look at pictures of myself lately, I think I understand why people always guess that I'm pregnant before I tell them...my face gets so soft and round...)
<p>
And he's finally off!
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Examining his egg (notice the Anakin tattoo on his hand...)
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I wish this picture weren't blurry. I was trying to capture the way he kept trying to give his eggs to the other kids. (Which the other parents always made them give back....isn't the etiquette between parents regarding their kids' behavior a little weird and stressful? It's like we tell our kids to share, but no, don't take that little boy's egg...everyone's so worried about doing it wrong...)
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttzJNFBI/AAAAAAAAAsw/Kz1JSaC2js0/s1600/DSC04920-small.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttzJNFBI/AAAAAAAAAsw/Kz1JSaC2js0/s320/DSC04920-small.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5465660993869517842" border="0" /></a>
Okay, so this turned out to be kind of fun...
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttvPW7rI/AAAAAAAAAso/e5I2R4IkMaI/s1600/DSC04924-small.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttvPW7rI/AAAAAAAAAso/e5I2R4IkMaI/s320/DSC04924-small.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5465660992821587634" border="0" /></a>
Yes! Candy!
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttSojk8I/AAAAAAAAAsg/58Djt5ljT_I/s1600/DSC04935-small.JPG"><img style="display: block; margin: 0px auto 10px; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S9nttSojk8I/AAAAAAAAAsg/58Djt5ljT_I/s320/DSC04935-small.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5465660985142645698" border="0" /></a>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-20241374233774674202010-04-20T22:01:00.002-06:002010-04-20T22:09:30.947-06:00um...have you seen my camera cord?Next time we need someone to get the TV working at my parents' house, I'll just put Dorian on the job.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548HZdBpI/AAAAAAAAAsI/0zXfQmJ5odg/s1600/DSC04864-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548HZdBpI/AAAAAAAAAsI/0zXfQmJ5odg/s320/DSC04864-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462436372220282514" /></a>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548U_UIAI/AAAAAAAAAsQ/Ah7SRvQG6aQ/s1600/DSC04865-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548U_UIAI/AAAAAAAAAsQ/Ah7SRvQG6aQ/s320/DSC04865-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462436375868743682" /></a>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548oLOcaI/AAAAAAAAAsY/DYLAc3Q8u_k/s1600/DSC04870-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S8548oLOcaI/AAAAAAAAAsY/DYLAc3Q8u_k/s320/DSC04870-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462436381018976674" /></a>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-19377356962917750222010-04-06T09:19:00.002-06:002010-04-06T09:28:56.640-06:00Dorian and his blanketDorian loves this blanket that my piano student Hannah made for him.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S7tRQZ5yggI/AAAAAAAAAr4/XfpYad1T6qI/s1600/DSC04852-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S7tRQZ5yggI/AAAAAAAAAr4/XfpYad1T6qI/s320/DSC04852-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5457044715762516482" /></a>
He even likes to be tucked in on the stairs (don't worry--he doesn't sleep there...he's a crib-only kind of sleeper).
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S7tRQoqMS2I/AAAAAAAAAsA/vEePafPwEvM/s1600/DSC04858-small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S7tRQoqMS2I/AAAAAAAAAsA/vEePafPwEvM/s320/DSC04858-small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5457044719723629410" /></a>
In other news, I have been asked to contribute to a new <a href="http://www.theteachingstudio.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">blog for piano teachers</a>. I know a few of you fall into that category, so I thought I'd mention it here. I will be posting once or twice a month, and the other contributors are all fantastic teachers, so give it a look if you are interested. I'm excited to be able to blog in depth about piano teaching, one of my favorite things in the world.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-53524896345149544022010-03-19T11:09:00.010-06:002010-03-19T12:11:19.622-06:00Mini Mozart GraduationAt the end of January, Dorian graduated from his <a href="http://artcitymusic.com/group.html" target="_blank">Mini Mozart</a> class at the <a href="http://artcitymusic.com/" target="_blank">Art City Music Academy</a>.
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He loved playing the drums. His cute teacher, Miss Laura, is sitting next to the keyboard, and the other mom is a girl I grew up with in Kaysville, who just happened to enroll in the same class!
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwN7xwHSI/AAAAAAAAAq4/BDhawh8elK0/s1600-h/DSC04800-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwN7xwHSI/AAAAAAAAAq4/BDhawh8elK0/s320/DSC04800-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450393727479586082" /></a>
They played with lots of rhythm instruments.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwO7WSDWI/AAAAAAAAArQ/0UJlTYCJwp8/s1600-h/DSC04819-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 240px; height: 320px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwO7WSDWI/AAAAAAAAArQ/0UJlTYCJwp8/s320/DSC04819-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450393744544238946" /></a>
Dorian loved to dive through the hoop!
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwPjylFGI/AAAAAAAAArY/iOwywDW_GtQ/s1600-h/DSC04826-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwPjylFGI/AAAAAAAAArY/iOwywDW_GtQ/s320/DSC04826-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450393755400344674" /></a>
He was a pro at the keyboard.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwOUYO5FI/AAAAAAAAArA/TQIMbNTQuJE/s1600-h/DSC04806-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwOUYO5FI/AAAAAAAAArA/TQIMbNTQuJE/s320/DSC04806-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450393734083437650" /></a>
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I just liked this picture of his cute face.
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He was so proud to get his certificate of completion!
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He loved getting a sticker on his hand at the end of class each week.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwbB9FRkI/AAAAAAAAArw/uYyfLIEdRro/s1600-h/DSC04833-small.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S6OwbB9FRkI/AAAAAAAAArw/uYyfLIEdRro/s320/DSC04833-small.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5450393952476022338" /></a>
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This semester he has moved on to <a href="http://artcitymusic.com/group.html" target="_blank">Toddler Tunes</a> and is already loving it!bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-43256571954783184452010-03-04T21:23:00.006-07:002010-03-04T21:54:12.064-07:00Clean White ShirtMaybe I haven't posted for a while because I haven't taken many pictures or videos lately. Today I was going through photos from the summer of 2008, when Dorian was born, because I still haven't printed a single photo out of the thousands I have taken since he was born (20 months ago!). So I was trying to decide which ones to print, and feeling like I was choosing way too many but at the same time, not nearly enough. I think I have exactly one picture of myself as a newborn baby. I narrowed Dorian's down to 8 from his first day of life, and another 5 or 6 from the next day. That's as many pictures as my mom took of me during my first, I don't know, 2 or 3 YEARS of life. Do you think he will appreciate having so many pictures of himself, or do you think he will roll his eyes in boredom whenever I pull out the scrapbooks? Oh well, I'm not doing it for him, I'm doing it for his wife.
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Anyway, here are some pictures of the last day this shirt was white (why did I let him eat an apple while wearing it?):
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S5CLpMO3ogI/AAAAAAAAAqw/txk_QZfvMkc/s1600-h/DSC04768-cropped+small.JPG"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 313px; height: 320px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S5CLpMO3ogI/AAAAAAAAAqw/txk_QZfvMkc/s320/DSC04768-cropped+small.JPG" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5445005489265418754" /></a>
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I've moved all his toys into my office, so we hang out in there a lot. He likes to squeeze between the bookcase and the wall, and he pretty much always has a car or two in each hand. Wouldn't you like to see the rest of my bookshelf?bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-87714386098596733502010-02-05T15:53:00.000-07:002010-02-05T15:53:00.167-07:00Children don't really misbehaveHere's another idea from <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Teaching-Children-Self-Discipline-Home-School/dp/0812917804" target="_blank">Teaching Children Self-Discipline</a> by Thomas Gordon that has helped me immensely, especially in those moments when Dorian is throwing his lunch across the kitchen, or dumping his milk all over his tray and the floor. It's the idea of problem ownership, which is something that I have vaguely understood in the past, but never yet applied to my relationship with my son. It's like this (p. 107):
<blockquote>[When an adult perceives that a child is misbehaving,] the "badness" of the behavior actually resides in the adult's mind, not the child's; the child in fact is doing what he or she chooses or needs to do to satisfy some need...put another way, the <i>adult</i> experiences the badness, not the child.
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...When adults begin to see children as persons like themselves, engaging in various behaviors to satisfy normal human needs, they are much less inclined to evaluate the behaviors as good or bad.
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...[This] doesn't mean, however, that adults will always feel <i>accepting</i> of what [the child does, but they can understand that] the child is not a misbehaving or bad child, not trying to do something <i>to the adult</i>, but rather is only trying to do something <i>for himself</i>.
</blockquote>
I paraphrased a bit, so you could get the point of it without reading the whole chapter.
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The author goes on to discuss strategies for working with young children, even babies and toddlers, such as finding out what they need, making some kind of a trade, and/or modifying the environment. These are great, and I already knew them, but for me, just stepping back and understanding that I am the one with the problem, not Dorian, helps me to see things in a new light and switch gears. And occasionally he is the one with the problem, and I can let him work that out too. Like when he has a poopy diaper but won't lie down for me to change it...
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And on and on. Read the book. It's good stuff.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-7949585214972829842010-02-04T15:29:00.006-07:002010-02-04T15:52:51.094-07:00Teaching Children Self-DisciplineI'm reading <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Teaching-Children-Self-Discipline-Home-School/dp/0812917804" target="_blank">Teaching Children Self-Discipline</a> by Thomas Gordon. While most of it is really applicable to older children (at least old enough to converse and reason things out with you), I have found it valuable even in dealing with [my reaction to] the "misbehaviors" of an 18-month old. I could share lots of little tidbits, and maybe I will later, but for now I just wanted to share the following 2 paragraphs (p. 175) that sort of knocked me over when I read them:
<blockquote>Conventional wisdom has it that if you genuinely <i>accept</i> a child, he or she will remain the same. It is also nearly universally believed that the way to help children do something better...is to point out their faults...Consequently, in dealing with children most parents and teachers rely almost exclusively on "correcting messages" &#151; on judging, criticizing, preaching, moralizing, admonishing, name-calling, blaming, lecturing, threatening, ordering, and directing &#151; all messages that convey <i>nonacceptance</i> of the child. This "language of unacceptance" is also the method of choice of other caretakers of our children.
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In recent years...we have found ample evidence that a necessary condition for helping others change is accepting them the way they are[!]</blockquote>
This was written in like 1985, so I don't think many of his generalizations about "most" parents are really fair anymore. I think "most" parents have already begun to understand what he is teaching here. But it still hit me like a ton of bricks. Even though I haven't been a parent for very long, I've been a teacher for over a decade. How many times have I criticized, moralized, admonished, judged, and generally <i>not accepted</i> my students, my family, my <i>husband</i>? Yikes. Thankfully, I know my students have been quite forgiving of my faults. I hope my children (and husband) can be too...bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-92010868245111711942010-01-25T17:10:00.005-07:002010-01-25T20:57:25.076-07:00Dorian's musicI wish I could rig up the video camera while we're in the car so you could hear Dorian singing along to his <a href="http://artcitymusic.com/group.html" target="_blank">Mini Mozart</a> CD. In lieu of that, here is a sample of some of the fun he has with music at home.
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Please forgive my microtonal key change between "DO" and "RE"...they were several minutes apart, and I obviously don't have perfect pitch...don't shoot me.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-78065453384059055562010-01-18T16:00:00.003-07:002010-01-18T16:18:25.655-07:00Dorian and his booksDorian loves his books. He asks for a book first thing in the morning and last thing at night, and many times between. He likes to be read to, but sometimes wants to sit in mom's chair and read by himself.
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dyMaooHja_PWcez-ZI9QJGOodfhBCbFMshcRgP_uFPNm7WYyj0UO0ik-fmAyP2MQ1v3MEObdNxWNI3akHSfGg' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' />
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I'll admit, my favorite part is the very end. Love my cute boy.bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-101158443604744895.post-44775042708858304162010-01-08T15:15:00.006-07:002010-01-08T16:02:34.040-07:00Christmas 2009We had a really great Christmas. Dorian made a very cute little shepherd in the nativity at grandma's house on Christmas eve.
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S0ezEjS1oSI/AAAAAAAAAqg/ONDfnNyxpaE/s1600-h/DSC04667-small.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S0ezEjS1oSI/AAAAAAAAAqg/ONDfnNyxpaE/s320/DSC04667-small.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424501166966153506" border="0"></a>
<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S0ezEAExckI/AAAAAAAAAqY/W-T_F-atJ3Y/s1600-h/DSC04669-cropped+small.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_y02l5xbTmZM/S0ezEAExckI/AAAAAAAAAqY/W-T_F-atJ3Y/s320/DSC04669-cropped+small.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5424501157511918146" border="0"></a>
This was our first year really playing Santa, and it was so much fun. Of course Dorian pretty much thought it was the best day ever...<center>
<iframe allowFullScreen='true' webkitallowfullscreen='true' mozallowfullscreen='true' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dzZ5Mk9WegU9UdE7ak9kiLft-eApXsQCblnS8c5MtSOqUUen1KwVkiItx2OIUx_TL1zCvXWWBq5AwPcYd40' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' FRAMEBORDER='0' /></center>bonnie jackhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00535334346084031553noreply@blogger.com6