20 posts in this topic

It's my pleasure to welcome you to another episode of Time Crash, a LEGOrrific story where a diverse cast of minifigs from different times and places try to survive in a dimensional void. If this is your first time running into this story, don't forget to read the earlier episodes from the links in my signature.

In this episode's many polls you will again vote which characters you want to survive in the fifth episode, as well as what each team will do next. Again, a minimum of three characters will not make it through the next episode. There are still twenty characters to choose from, and you can vote multiple characters as well.

This episode brings us more deaths as voted by you readers, this time even more brutal than in the previous episode. You also voted for the bandit Trigger's group to divide into a search party and a base camp, while the captain Dereq's party will stay put to make a camp of their own. Throw in a few loose characters as well as two new ones, and you've got yourselves a fine episode to read!

So what are you still waiting for?

*****

Olaf, Viking Chieftain (Viking Age ~ North Atlantic, 1000 AD)

Thurbaldr, the Viking (Viking Age ~ North Atlantic, 1000 AD)

Thurbaldr felt like a total outsider in this gathering of survivors. The others were all huddled together, fervently exchanging words that were utter gibberish to the Viking warrior. There were a few others that didn’t participate in the discussion, but whether they didn’t understand the language or just didn’t want to take part, Thurbaldr couldn’t say.

The warriors eyes kept returning to the bow of the ship that was looming above them all. It was no doubt the vessel that had brought him to this strangest of lands. In a spur of a moment, Thurbaldr decided to climb up the hill to see what was left of the ship.

His size and heavy gear made the climbing arduous and time-consuming, but finally he managed to haul himself over the side and onto the deck. From the corner of his eye he saw a large figure leaping towards him, but he didn’t have the time or the space to duck. The attacker pinned him down to the deck.

“By Frigga’s tits, Thurbaldr?!” a familiar voice hissed. Thurbaldr realized that he was looking in the eyes of his chieftain, Olaf Forgefire. The first thing that crossed Thurbaldr’s mind was relief that the chieftain had apparently lost his dreaded axe.

“Now you tell everything! What spell did you conjure to bring us here? Where are the rest of the mutinous scoundrels? And who by Bragi’s rotten teeth are those outlandish people down there?” Olaf was no longer speaking in hushed tones, but screaming his lungs out, like was his habit.

*****

Anne, the Patient (Postmodern Time ~ Australia, 1990 AD)

Ashton, the Lord (Victorian Era ~ United Kingdom, 1880 AD)

Ferid, the Assassin (Ancient Middle-East ~ Persian Empire, 200 BC)

Jeremiah, the Old Pirate (Pirate Age ~ Caribbean Sea, 1700 AD)

Parker, the Schoolboy (Postmodern Time ~ Australia, 1990 AD)

Uhla, the Shamaness (Prehistoric Era ~ Oceania, 8000 BC)

“No, Parker! You can’t go with Bob”, the middle-aged woman explained to the boy for the umpteenth time. “This place is far too dangerous, you saw it yourself!”

“But Auntie Anne, it’s so boring here!” the boy Parker whinged.

Ashton just sighed and looked at the rest of the motley crew gathered at the beach. About half of the group had decided to go explore what they could find from this God forsaken land. They had left the elderly, the boy and the foreigners behind to build a shelter in case night would ever fall upon them. The young lord had no will to go anywhere, or do anything for that matter, so he had chosen to stay behind as well.

The Vikings were carrying floorboards and other wooden things from the shipwreck, while the old pirate and the red-haired savage woman fried some fish in the small campfire they had started. The cloaked man just stood back and concentrated on brooding, apparently.

As if he had lost anybody that meant as much to him as Eleanor had meant to Ashton! His sorrow was surely without compare! Eleanor had carried his baby, after all. The baby had been his only hope of ever getting an heir to his family’s fortune! The young lord had been unable to keep a woman for longer than days. They had all shied away from the sickness in his mind – all except Eleanor. She had remained by his side, enduring the nightly howls and the sudden fits of inexplicable rage. All Ashton had had to do was pay her a little extra…

But now it was all over. Ashton shifted his gaze back to the shallow water. The white horizon was so close… He could almost hear the voices of all those people in the other side of that smoky veil… If he could just get closer, he was sure he’d be able to hear Eleanor again. That’s right, she was just there, just barely out of his reach!

The others didn’t even notice Ashton as he took the remaining boat and paddled towards the horizon, not before he started screaming in pain as the brightness tore him apart.

*****

Bob, the Paramedic (Postmodern Time ~ Australia, 1990 AD)

Cougar Claw, the Lakota Princess (Wild West ~ USA, 1840 AD)

Rosette, the Pirate (Pirate Age ~ Caribbean Sea, 1700 AD)

Santiago, the Lieutenant (Pirate Age ~ Caribbean Sea, 1700 AD)

Sergei, the Commander (World War II ~ Soviet Union, 1940 AD)

Trigger, the Bandit (Wild West ~ USA, 1840 AD)

Sergei lead the exploration party through the shrubbery into an area with a crossroad and tall ruined houses.

“Roads paved with solid stone!” the Native American girl exclaimed in awe. She was clutching a spear with feathers attached to it. It had belonged to her father. “What other wonders will we find here?”

“Haha, you’ve sure gotten your curiosity back, dolly!” the bandit called Trigger laughed. The girl had indeed been miserable ever since the funeral. It was good that she had regained her will to live, Sergei thought. He didn’t want to drag any deadweight behind him.

“We should search those ruins for survivors or supplies”, Bob suggested. Sergei noted that the medic had gotten increasingly nervous for some reason.

“Ah, a good scavenge hunt to brighten the day!” Rosette, the pirate woman, laughed. The Spanish soldier that didn’t take his eyes off of her shook his head at her remark.

“Alright, ve start here” Sergei said and made his way to the closest doorway. As he opened the door, a huge, squirming pile of vipers slithered out. Sergei cursed out loud.

“What the heck?!” Bob shouted in disbelief as the snakes poured out of the ruins.

“Here, quick!” the bandit called from the opposite side of the street. There was an open door with a staircase leading to the upper floors behind it. Cougar Claw wielded her spear to fend off the snakes while Trigger used his revolver with deadly accuracy.

“Conserve bullets!” Sergei barked as he ran past the bandit. Just as he reached the first floor he heard a shrill scream from the street. He quickly glanced around and saw that all six of them were safely in the room, so the screamer wasn’t any of them. Then he ran to the window, followed by the others.

It was the boy. The snakes had covered his body almost completely, so there was nothing they could do anymore.

“That accursed brat, he followed us even though I told him not to!” Bob cursed and punched the wall with his fist.

Cougar Claw buried her face to Trigger’s chest. Rosette let out a deep sigh while the Spaniard looked away, taking his hat off. Sergei just stared blankly out of the window. One deadweight less.

*****

Ghast, the Black Knight (Middle Ages ~ Scotland, 1300 AD)

Morrigan, the Witch (Middle Ages ~ Scotland, 1300 AD)

Morrigan grew suspicious. They had travelled quite far from the smoking chariot that the Lord of Darkness had arrived in, and now the others wanted to rest. Rest, in the name of all things unholy! The Birthday of the Antichrist was upon them, and these cretins wanted to build a camp and start a bonfire like it was Midsummer’s Fest!

The witch couldn’t believe that her Lord hadn’t scorched the nonbelievers with his flames already. He was just chatting away with them, answering their disrespectful queries about his realms. Morrigan was in deep doubt that she had made a mistake.

Just looking around, she knew that the End of All Times had come, but where were all the suffering souls? Where was the torture of those who opposed the Dark Prince? Where were the howling demons and hordes of the undead?

Morrigan was sure she had been mistaken about the identity of the dark one. She felt ridiculed and ashamed, and she would not have any of that!

“Ghast!” she hollered, summoning the black knight that had been her guardian and hunter for all these years. Ghast was a perfect man for the job: dull of mind, but strong of arm and vicious of heart. No amount of cruelties phased him. He was even eager to share the human sacrifices Morrigan had so often offered to her Lord. She was glad to have an ally like him in this place.

Morrigan took Ghast a small distance away from the others. “Listen closely, my servant. There has been a great mistake. That creature I thought was our Dark Lord is in fact an impostor. We must make haste and find our true master before it’s too late.”

The witch saw that her guardian didn’t quite get it. “You said he was the one. You promised he would make the nightmares end.”

“No, listen, you dimwit...” the witch hissed. She didn’t have patience for the ramblings of this fool.

“You promised!” the knight yelled. The others stopped talking and turned their attention to the pair.

XETA was the only one who didn’t even flinch when the knight raised his sword against his mistress and beheaded her in one strike. The android knew that madness was part of the nature of humankind. Yes, he knew humanity better than anyone else.

“What the helium was that about?” Vanya asked after the knight had stormed off, leaving the body of Morrigan to pump blood on the ground. XETA quickly returned to his job as a translator.

“The lie could not last any further”, Zhu Que commented. His apprentice Huang just stared intensively at the flames of the campfire. The girl’s face was pale.

“Damn it, it looks like I have to clean this mess up!” Dereq groaned, jumping to his feet. XETA stood up as well.

“I will help”, the android replied and gave a wide smile to the captain. He was glad that the dark cloud caused by Morrigan and her guard was now lifted from this little group. They had hope after all.

Together Dereq and XETA took the body and the severed head of the witch out of sight, and then returned to help the others to settle down to the cave they had found. The cave continued far into the depths of the land, but none of them felt confident enough to investigate it yet.

*****

Linda, the Hippie (Generation of Love ~ Sweden, 1960 AD)

Rhodos, the Aspiring Poet (Antiquity ~ Phoenicia, 1100 BC)

Linda cycled through the psychedelic landscape. She had been on her way to her summer job at the greenhouses when a white light had taken her and her bike here. As she rode onwards, she jokingly listed things she had eaten in the morning in her head, just in case any of them had contained weed.

But it was impossible. She hadn’t touched that stuff ever since she had returned from her student exchange year in the States. Linda wanted to bring only the good things she had experienced back to Sweden with her.

She kept on riding, hoping that this was just a weird daydream that would soon come to an end. She even closed her eyes, hoping it would help, but it only caused her to bump into something and fall of the bike.

“Ouch!” she moaned as she stood up. As she opened her eyes, she saw that she had hit an old-fashioned wagon that was half sunken into the ground. There was also a young man with a bow in his hands staring her in shock. Tears were flooding down his eyes.

“Hey, what’s the matter, my brother? I’m not hurt, see? Everything’s alright!” she said in Swedish. She saw that the man had no idea what she was talking about, so she repeated it in English, but to no avail.

Not getting rattled over the language barrier, Linda lifted up her bike and walked it to the man. The man was surely an odd sight in his loincloth, but his distressed expression made Linda feel sorry for him.

“Don’t worry, you can ride with me”, she said, tapping the saddle of the bicycle. “Maybe we’ll run into other lost people as well!”

*****

Now that you're finished reading, make sure you don't forget to vote in the polls and leave a comment along with some feedback if you like.

Oh, and as a special treat, I offer you the sketched map of the island formed in the dimensional collapse, nicknamed as Void Island:

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

YAY! The annoying kid died (thats how Harry Potter should have ended). Maybe the best part yet, the plot reminds of LOST. I voted for Bob, Sergei and Zhu Que to keep living, and for everyone to pretty much remain where they are, as I think there are still mysteries remaining.

Question: to you have a deadline like 'last three alive get rescued', or are you just gonna see where it takes you?

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Question: to you have a deadline like 'last three alive get rescued', or are you just gonna see where it takes you?

I have a few ideas on how this thing will end, but mostly I'm just going with inspiration and flow, and of course what you guys decide in the polls. So yeah, I think I'll leave it up to the readers to decide whether the last few survivors will make everything right again or not, when that time comes. We'll see.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Not much happened this episode Sandy. I've got to give you advice. And here it is.

To make the story more exciting:

1) Don't just focus on the character's who are goingto die. They're dying. They're not going anywhere. And while some of the deaths can be sad... well, don't let it over take the rest of the story.

2) Focus on a smaller amount of characters. Everyone had just one line or so, except the dying ones. So, do this. Maybe only look at half the characters in detail. And make them interact. i really want to see Ferid try to stop his assain self when forced into this situation, and Rosette and Santaigo shouldn't be all chummy. They should have a hard time banding together as a group.

3) Make conflict between characters! It will make it cooler. Make the group start as enemies maybe. It could be really interesting! Also, not all deaths should just be random things falling or snakes or a river. The Ghast and Morrigan death is more of what we want to see.

Okay, people I voted for. Mostly for the same reasons as last episode, but I'll say if it's for a different reason:

Anne - Want to see Ferid and her interact, and she's dying. And her life sucks. Everyone she cares about dies right away.

Bob - He's a good guy. He's grown on me, and I want to see him and Trigger talk.

Couger - She's also grown on me. I want her and Trigger to interact some more, and to see her be the friend of everyone in the group.

Dereq - Like him. Just the gung-ho kind of guy all stories need. Want he and Trigger to meet still.

Ferid - He and Anne interact, and the above.

Huang - Like her.

Jeremiah - Voice of reason.

Linda - She was my request. I feel responsible for her.

Rosette - Her and Santiago. See above.

Santiago - Same as Rosette.

Sergei - Awesome leader, possibly the one I want to see evolve the most.

Thurbaldr - I like him. He's another just honest good guy.

Trigger - The hero.

Xeta - Perfect character. Don't know much about him, lots of room to evolve. Maybe he could be tied in with what's happening more than the others.

Zhu - Same as Huang.

Now, the action votes:

I want the Vkings to observe, becuase I want them near but seperate.

I want the search group to keep looking at the houses becuase I don't want them to meet up with the bBeach group too soon. Seperate groups give you an easier time focusing on certain characters and how they interact together. Each group (there are about four) are the perfect size, about 6 each. That's enough for you to write a little story about each group each time.

Venture into the cave, for adventure reasons.

Finally, meet Ghast, so that they form a group.

I liked this episodee, especially the scene in the house area. I liked the way they marveled at the new stuff (couger Claw) interacted (Trigger and Sergei) and didn't focus too much on the death, but were effected by it.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Thanks for the suggestions and advice, Zepher! I just got to say that in my opinion this episode was full of events and especially important things that foreshadow what's to come:

1. Adding Olaf to the mix brings tension in the form of him taking over. He's a chieftain who is used to rule with an iron fist (or rather, an axe), and I don't think he will settle on being on the sidelines for too long.

2. The death of Ashton, although it could've been shorter, confirmed there's no going into the light. The survivors are trapped on the Void Island until they find a way to reverse the dimensional collapse. And whether that happens or not is up to you guys.

3. I'm quite happy with the crossroads-scene, too. The snakes brought randomity into it, and the dead person could've been anyone. You just chose it would be Parker. I don't want every character to be killed by the other survivors. We already have Ywen, Northfalk and Morrigan's deaths on someone's conscience, if you remember.

4. With Morrigan, I did pretty much what you suggested, Zepher. That she would start to get suspicious about XETA. This scene also provided a vital part of information about Ghast: that he's mentally retarded.

5. Now the cave... Do you think the writings on the walls of the cave are just random things? You're forgetting that XETA knows every language in the history of humankind, and that goes for written language as well. So yes, there's lot of secrets waiting to be uncovered in the cave.

6. Then there's the "excess" characters. I wanted to bring someone you guys suggested as a new character, and now you have Linda. There is potential in this group, but whether it's used or not depends on your votes again.

So yeah, there was a lot of things going on in my opinion, but I agree that there could be more interaction between the characters. It would just mean that the episodes would get much longer, and I'm already starting to think that they're too long for their own good. People can read a book of few hundred pages easily, but somehow in the internet anything longer that a few chapters causes them problems.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

I'm not saying is epde wasn't good, and of course I understand the cave would be more into it. I understood what you did with the Ashton death too. And the Morrigan death was good, my favorite of the episode. And I'm happy with Linda. She could be the voice of reason and peace, or just a funny character!

The only one of your points I disagree with is Olaf. I don't feel he's needed, Sergei already holds that spot of somewhat leader that interests me. But I'm a sucker for power struggles, so bring it on!

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

The only one of your points I disagree with is Olaf. I don't feel he's needed, Sergei already holds that spot of somewhat leader that interests me. But I'm a sucker for power struggles, so bring it on!

I got that you liked this episode, so no worries. I just have to point out the difference between Olaf and Sergei: the Russian commander uses manipulation and authority to lead the group, while Olaf is more of a tyrant who will do anything to get his way. With Morrigan gone, I thought the story could use another clearly villainous character.

But who knows, Olaf might be gone as soon as the next episode comes. It's your choice.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Okay, after 13 votes, we have five characters on the chopping block: our brutish Vikings Olaf and Thurbaldr, the sassy explorer Vanya and the mysterious shamaness Uhla, and the dull-minded black knight Ghast. Remember that only three characters need to be killed off. You still have time to make that difference.

I also need some feedback on the imagery. Should I post more pictures per episode, perhaps showcasing the MOCs I've build for this story more? Or does too many pictures distract the storytelling too much? Do you maybe want larger pics, or even smaller pics? Please tell your opinion and help me improve this story.

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

This is again a nice episode in the Time Crash story. I do think the images may be a little bit bigger, but there shouldn't be any more. And I also think Olaf is not necessary. Maybe Thurbaldr can become friends with Sergei, and maybe they understand each other so Thurbaldr has a tolk. Or isn't that possible?

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

Awesome work as always Sandy. I'm sorry I'm a little late, I was at my shack for a few days.

I say that the amount of pics is fine by the way, I wouldn't have any more, but you laso need them to help tell the story so you're going fine, trust you're instincts.

I love how everything is going, I'm most interested in the space cave group. Of course being a follower of violence (!) I must vote for the vikings ot take the beach and others to return to it. Also for the cave group to go deeper and discover more.

You've also done a good job of furthering the characters, including even making me like Thulbaldyr!

Also, I love how Ghast (cool name by the by) killed the witch, I didn't see that coming and though I loved the dynamic between the two, I'm looking forward to knowing more about him, and to do that he needed to be away from the witch.

I laughed at how casual the cave's group was about the witch's beheading, and the insight into XETa is something I'm interested in seeing more of.]

Share this post

Link to post

Share on other sites

But I've managed to build most of the new MOCs I need for the next episode, and I just finished writing the text today. I won't make any promises anymore, but I'll try to get it up this upcoming week. Just need to take the photos and compile it all together.

But I can already tell you that the fifth episode will be quite a treat! And something about the nature of the dimensional collapse is revealed as well... *dun dun dunnn*