Relationships and running.

It's so good to know that I'm nto the only one who's got this issue but I could really do with a pick-me-up. Trouble is my partner isn't a complete non-runner. When we met we would run about the same pace and same distances (3 miles ish). I put running on hold for 6 months to finish an OU course but really got back into it around November. He runs but sees it as something he "has to do" to keep in shape and he now runs much faster than me. We run parkrun "together" and are both members of the same running club although he tends to only go to speedwork sessions.

He's not into races or increasing his distance and has said he finds talking about running really boring. He says he's proud of me but has twice asked me to not go to a race I've booked a place on in order to go to a family event. He doesn't see a race as a "good excuse" or one he's comfortable giving for my absence.

We've had rows about it and I don't know what to do about it. I was hoping to do my first marathon next year as well as a couple of other races, all for charity and I'm terrified he will ask me to give up one of those.

I am a mouse i admit. I dread telling my other half about my next event, since she doesnt understand, i need my fix, that goal to aim towards. that next race, the buzz of meeting other racers, getting ready, feeling your adrenaline kicking in, as the start of the race draws nearer. I am doing my first marathon next year, and i admit, i put off telling her for ages, i was doing it, since she knew it would mean longer times out. Her reaction wasnt so great, and i had to stop myself from having a big row with her.

Hang in there Vikki, since you are not alone. As long as you are fitting in family time, like i do, then he has no case. Its not like your racing every week, and runs you can fit in around other people. It just means getting up earlier i suppose..

Actually my OH knows my running schedule up till April next year in terms of races. My first marathon is the Sussex marathon. Look it up.

He's not into races or increasing his distance and has said he finds talking about running really boring. He says he's proud of me but has twice asked me to not go to a race I've booked a place on in order to go to a family event. He doesn't see a race as a "good excuse" or one he's comfortable giving for my absence.

It's easy to comment from afar...but surely it depends what you class as a "family event".

If it's a wedding/big birthday/major get together, then yes perhaps a race is a bad excuse to miss it.

However, those kind of events would surely have been planned ages ahead.

If he just classes a weekly trip round to the Inlaws as a family event, then he needs to lose the possessiveness and get a grip. You didn't sign your life away on getting with him

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