No one can say that Alan Rickman doesn't have range. The actor, who's best known for playing Severus Snape in the Harry Potter films, recently signed on to play Ronald Reagan in The Butler, and Rolling Stone reports that he'll next play CBGB owner Hilly Kristal in a movie about the legendary punk rock club.
The film will tell the story of how the country and bluegrass club CBGB wound up serving as the birthplace of the American punk rock movement in the late '70s. This means that there will be plenty of opportunities for Lenny Kravitz types to prove they have acting chops, and for actors to follow in Tom Cruise's footsteps and rock out onstage. So, who should play the famous musicians who frequented CBGB in the early days? We have a few suggestions!
Joey Ramone: Who's fit to wear the motorcycle jacket of the 6'6" rocker? The first person who comes to mind is Howard Stern, but he's too old for the role (plus, he's got his hands full with America's Got Talent). If you give Adrien Brody a shaggy haircut, he can definitely pull it off.
Patti Smith: Aside from physically resembling Patti Smith, Lizzy Caplan could also capture her spirit. We can definitely imagine Mean Girls' Janis Ian or April from Hot Tub Time Machine breaking into a performance of "Because the Night."
Adam Yauch: Eminem has always cited the Beastie Boys as one of his biggest influences, and what better way to pay tribute to the late Adam Yauch than to play him in a biopic? Eminem already has an Oscar for Best Original Song, but he'd probably love to pick one up for acting as well.
Debbie Harry: As long as we have musicians playing their idols, we might as well have Gwen Stefani take on the role of Debbie Harry.
Sting: Neil Patrick Harris can sing, and he could easily capture Sting's look. He'd just need to work on the British accent, because this won't cut it:
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[Rolling Stone]

A feud broke out today regarding The Voice, and for once it had little to do with the show's arch rival American Idol. In the latest issue of Rolling Stone, country star Eric Church declared that the winners of singing competition shows like The Voice shouldn't call themselves artists, and said signing on to judge the shows taints a musician's legacy. Apparently he forgot that he's toured with Miranda Lambert, who became famous on the show Nashville Star, is married to Voice judge Blake Shelton, and isn't shy about picking fights with other celebrities.
Church told the magazine, "Honestly, if Blake Shelton and Cee Lo Green turn around in a red chair, you got a deal? That’s crazy ... I don’t know what would make an art­ist do that. You're not an artist." As for the judges, he added, "Once your career becomes about some­thing other than the music, then that's what it is. I'll never make that mistake. I don't care if I starve."
Both Shelton and Lambert gave Church a piece of their mind on Twitter. Shelton linked to the article and commented, "I wish I misunderstood this . . ." Then Lambert wrote, "Thanks Eric Church for saying I'm not a real artist," adding, "You're welcome for the tour in 2010."
On Tuesday Church apologized for his remarks, and explained that he's miffed that the shows don't portray the hard work that goes into being a musician. "The comment I made to Rolling Stone was part of a larger commentary on these types of reality television shows and the perception they create, not the artists involved with the shows themselves," Church said. "The shows make it appear that artists can shortcut their way to success. There are a lot of artists due to their own perseverance that have gone on to be successful after appearing on these shows, but the real obstacles come after the cameras stop rolling. Every artist has to follow up television appearances with dedication towards their craft, but these shows tend to gloss over that part and make it seem like you can be ordained into stardom."
He went on to apologize to the numerous country stars who got their start on singing competitions. "I have a lot of respect for what artists like Carrie Underwood, Kelly Clarkson, and my friend Miranda Lambert have gone on to accomplish," he said. "This piece was never intended to tear down any individual and I apologize to anybody I offended in trying to shed light on this issue. I am grateful for all of the artists and fans that have supported me along my journey and certainly did not mean for my comments to undermine their talent and achievements."
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[Rolling Stone]

Year in and year out, the American Idol judges’ panel claims the current crop of contestants is the best. Top 13. Of. All. Time. While it’s most certainly up for debate whether or not season 11 is made up of the most talented singers — season 7 would raise Phillip a David Cook while season 8 would raise Joshua an Adam Lambert — it seems after last night that we’re certainly looking at the smartest Top 13. Of. All. Time. While the remaining six contestants all presented viewers with perfectly enjoyable, tap-your-knee renditions of Queen’s greatest hits, they also picked (with the exception of our dear magical pixie Hollie) more obscure songs for their personal choice number.
Jennifer Lopez might have thought this was a risky endeavor, but, then again, so is showing up to a televised pop culture event without Kelly and Michelle to wear House of Dereon alongside you. Or officially passing the People’s Most Beautiful torch to Beyoncé via one of MC Hammer’s old pairs of pajamas. Or going anywhere without your trusty sidekick R2D2. I can’t stop. So… many… jokes about J. Lo’s outfit. Help us, Tommy Hilfiger, you’re our only hope!
But we can’t say Jennifer was wrong to label the song choices risky Wednesday night. But we can say they were as smart as Hollie desperately pleading with a sympathetic audience to save her. If these past few weeks have proved anything, it’s that American Idol is an unpredictable beast. But these past few years have proved it’s also the biggest media outlet on which to showcase your talent and musical style. For our Top 6, Idol is not so much about winning anymore — it’s about attracting a record label that will suit your musical needs and desires. Sure, Phillip, Elise, and Joshua could win performing lazy covers of crowd-pleasers like “Against All Odds,” “I Have Nothing,” and “Hallelujah,” but what can you lose by showing viewers and record labels who you really are?
NEXT: Phillip Phillips: Master of The (Kidney) StoneFor example, take Phillip Phillips. During his first number — an aggressive rendition of “Fat-Bottomed Girls” that left his face so cherry-red, I thought he would pop, much like many girls hearing the words “Phillip,” “cherry,” and ”pop” in the same sentence — I feared he might be walking into Jason Castro territory. After all, why not sabotage yourself on a series in which sensitive rockers have struggled following their respective victories? (I still love you though, David Cook and Kris Allen. And I still love to quickly change your iTunes version of “Treat Her Like a Lady” when I fear the stranger on the subway next to me is peering over my shoulder, Lee DeWyze.) But lest you think his choice to sing Dave Matthews was an attempt to mock his own reputation, just listen to his rendition of the aptly titled “The Stone.” It will kick you right in the kidney. The song’s lyrics even seem to atone to more lazy performances like “Fat-Bottomed Girls”: “Oh, I’ve been praying / For some way to show them / I’m not what they see.”
But the best part about Phillip is that — during most of his performances, like “Movin’ Out,” “U Got It Bad,” and “Still Rainin’” — Phillip is what the audience sees. As Randy told the contestant in a rare moment of poetic lucidity, “Die, sink, or swim, Phil Phillips will always be Phil Phillips.” We’re talking about a guy who so refuses to change, he won’t even wear a primary color. This isn’t a contestant who will unwisely sing “Smells Like Teen Spirit” or “Proud to be an American” in an attempt to get votes — this is a singer who knows exactly who he is: A former pawn shop worker who can carry a tune as well as he can carry a large stuffed turkey. And nothing could be more attractive to a record company than an attractive singer who can attract a legion of fans through an already patented brand of music.
For Joshua Ledet, that brand of music is a little more unclear. Though the vocal powerhouse has become a judges’ favorite via his gospel take on hits, he’s realized he could find better success and marketability channeling the likes of Bruno Mars. It’s a smart segue, and an effective one — though Tim Urban, David Radford, Taylor Hicks, and Fantasia tried before him, not one Idol contestant had delivered a semi-decent version of “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” until Joshua stuck his retro-soul stamp on the song.
Smart as he may be, though, Idol’s judges have been rash in their judgments, doing the contestant little service leading up to the Top 5. Let me break it down for you: Twelve standing ovations. Twelve. Just how many solos have we seen from Joshua since the semifinals? Eleven, including Wednesday night’s “Ready For Love,” which, interesting a song choice it may be, hardly made me ready to get on my feet. Look, many of them were deserved, but the judges have been giving away standing ovations like a 2007 hipster gives away Juno quotes about China giving away babies like free iPods, Homeskillet. Not only does that turn off cynical Idol viewers looking for reasons to conspiracy theorize that Joshua is the target of judge favoritism (J. Lo literally telling Joshua that he’s her favorite doesn’t help), but it also makes it difficult for viewers to distinguish when we should really be blown away by Joshua. If every performance is special enough to receive a standing ovation, then, really, no performance is special enough to receive a standing ovation. You may want to give him “four checks” after every song, but, Randy, you’ve got to make sure you give him a balance of critiques.
NEXT: Boldly go where no one wants to ever go. Elise Testone might have evolved enough over the course of the competition to realize her strength resides in bohemian rock, but the contestant has yet to reign in her vocal style, just like she has yet to reign in her personal style. Singing in front of a ridiculous backdrop featuring the alphabet — the letters of which Randy furiously collected so he could later ask Joshua to sing them — Elise did rock out on “I Want It All,” finding her niche with a groovy beat and a tambourine. Or perhaps she simply connected with the title of the song, since it’s what she says every time she walks into a jewelry store.
But though her choice of Jimi Hendrix’s “Bold As Love” was refreshingly, well, bold, her execution of the song just made us wonder how the singer got Badger from Breaking Bad to accompany her on guitar. We needed the distraction hearing the performance — otherwise, we’d be forced to listen to the sound of Hendrix rolling in his grave. Honestly, “Bold As Love” is a difficult song to tackle, but Elise pounced on it like she was at WrestleMania. She beat out all of the song’s simplicity, turning it into a vanity number with as many runs as a Taco Bell bathroom. (SORRY!)
Surprisingly, though, on Wednesday night I wasn’t running from Hollie Cavanagh, who all but sealed a slot in the Top 5 thanks to a little help from her friends the producers (pimp spot!) and a crafty choice of song. First off was “Save Me” from Queen, one of those songs that can either work for you — literally demanding Idol’s voting fanbase to dial your number — or against you, placing you in the ranks of previous Idols with unfortunate cast-off songs. (Sorry, Charles Grigsby. Indeed, “You Can’t Win.”) Though I can’t be the only one uncomfortable with watching Hollie sing the lyric “I’m naked and I’m far from home,” which I’m pretty sure is the slogan for Four Loko.
NEXT: Hollie climbs?But as soon as Hollie was finished icily suggesting that Emily Thorne should stop dating her son Daniel, she changed into a fresh new wardrobe with a fresh new outlook to match. Typically, I hate contestants that sing the “I Believe I Can Fly” for the Twitter generation, but “The Climb” suited Hollie’s tone, helping us viewers remember the singer who expertly covered “The Power of Love” back during Top 11 week. Still, Hollie is hardly powerful enough to reach Idol’s confetti-filled summit, but this could help her climb the list of Idol’s power players.
Especially when Jessica Sanchez seems to be inviting Hollie to fill her teen-friendly slot in the competition. Ever since the contestant flirted with elimination two weeks back, she has yet to show us the return of that perky performer who somehow sucked in the maturity of a 50-something diva and channeled it into jaw-dropping performances like “I Will Always Love You.” (As my trusty Idol companion and mother said, “I feel like she got whipped and has no spirit in her heart.”) Despite the fact that Queen’s music somehow seemed to suit Jessica’s voice best — she sang circles around the rest of the Top 6 during the beginning group number — the contestant couldn’t quite deliver the proper drama needed to perform “Bohemian Rhapsody.” And that’s despite all the bells and whistles — the odd black-and-white footage, the backdrop that resembled a terrifying meth-induced nightmare… it all failed to even add up to the admittedly horrible, but no less entertaining, versions of the song we saw from the likes of Kellie Pickler and Constantine Maroulis (and paled in comparison to Michael Johns’ Hollywood version in season 7).
Of course, she made up for her lackluster “Bohemian Rhapsody” with a version of Luther Vandross’ “Dance With My Father” that had Grammy Performance written all over it. The gorgeous dress, dramatic lighting, wind machine that has gotten so much play, it might as well be named the seventh contestant — not to mention the vote-friendly family story behind her choosing the song. That said, though many might feel sympathy that Jessica’s father is being deployed to Singapore, she may be in danger of real elimination Thursday night. Not only because she was forced to sing in that cursed No. 1 slot, but also because the judges were less enthusiastic than Brian May at an Ace Young concert. In fact, even though J. Lo claimed Jessica’s “Dance With My Father” was the best version of the song she had ever heard, the trio failed to give the singer anything close to a standing ovation. Perhaps that’s just because they’re saving it for next week for when Joshua sings LFO’s “Summer Girls.”
And last, but most definitely not least, we have Skylar Laine, perhaps the smartest contestant of all. Who doesn’t reach for the pre-sale button knowing the contestant has a song under her noose-covered belt called “Diamond-Studded Pistol”? What religious Colton Dixon fan doesn’t shift their votes to Skylar after hearing she has a God-inspired tattoo? Who doesn’t turn up their televisions hearing her bursting version of “The Show Must Go On,” which came refreshingly devoid of the emotional histrionics reserved for most big Idol numbers? And who doesn’t have a hard time believing that “Tattoos on This Town” is actually a Jason Aldean song, and not a Skylar Laine original? Any other year, Skylar would be considered a favorite to win the whole shebang, but, with Joshua clinching the judge support, the young country star in the making might have to settle for being Idol’s dark horse. Still, I have a feeling this dark horse could ride straight into the finale, diamond-studded pistol in hand.
Readers, who do you think is the smartest Idol left? Was it not-so-smart for Hollie to accidentally call Skylar “thick-boned?” Was it nice to see Brian May and Roger Taylor back on Idol, especially when they’re not yelling at Ace Young? Did you wish Jimmy Iovine was around Wednesday to wear hats and coach contestants into choosing the wrong song? Why did Randy choose to talk when the pin on his jacket, “Yo,” could have pretty much done all the work for him? Was it not adorable watching Julianne Hough’s Phil Phillips crush be revealed — and then seeing her mouth “Oh s**t!” realizing cameras were filming her embarrassment? Can Ryan rock a pompadour? Is there any answer to that question besides “No”?
Follow Kate on Twitter @HWKateWard
[Photo Credit: FOX]
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S2E10: So, Monday night on The Voice, a bunch of people sang, and most of them were merely okay. On Tuesday, Carsonbot informs us, six of those people will writhe in exquisite agony onstage for our viewing pleasure, and four will fall victim to the cruelty of the American populace and/or iTunes sales. “Fail!” the texts and Facebook votes will roar, and the performers will weep, weep to be so alone even amidst the massive crowds that, mere weeks ago, were crying their names in ecstasy.
Also, if the TV Gods are just, Purrfect will triumphantly return to our screens.
Onwards, onwards! Down into the bowels of the Hell that is Live Television!
First, in What Are the Coaches Wearing? News: Adam looks like he’s late for Wimbledon. Cee Lo is no longer channeling the Ghost of James Brown. Blake is... Blake. And Christina is apparently out to punish all of us for our howls of “Oompa Loompa!” and “Blonde Snooki!” earlier this season by looking as good as possible.
Carsonbot asks Blake and Christina that vague question that no one really understands the point of, which is basically, “How do you feel about this tough situation?” Blake doesn’t think any of his team should go home — “It’s not tough, it’s sucky” — and Christina thinks of her team as family.
Apropos of nothing, Gym Class Heroes and Neon Hitch perform “Ass Back Home” for us. Travie McCoy is wearing what looks like overly elaborate crown molding, and we barely even see Team Adam until the end. That’s about the depth of my analysis on this one, sorry.
Carsonbot then shepherds us into the pre-taped segment on Team Blake. Blake took his team to a country radio station somewhere in the sprawl of LA, where he informs them that nothing can compare to the power of radio. Is that really still the case, or am I just out of the loop because I can’t afford a car? He tells an endearing story from his first days as a Big Time Country Musician, craning his neck at the cars next to him at stoplights to see if they were listening to his music. And April 5 in LA, he’s going to host an acoustic concert with his whole team, so if you’re in LA, go check that out, I guess. It does seem like Blake is trying to teach them the value of good friends in business, and also that music is, you know, a business. That’s nice.
Back in Liveland, Team Blake shivers and twitches and generally looks as though it wishes it were literally anywhere else right now. If I were an emotional succubus, I imagine I could feed off the recording of this show for a lifetime, the misery of everyone on the stage is so palpable.
After approximately one geologic age of tension, Carsonbot reveals America has given Erin Willett, Jermaine Paul, and RaeLynne a reprieve. The Victors are all teary and huggy; Jordis is like, “God, again?” Now she, Charlotte Sometimes, and Naia Kete will have to convince Blake to save one of them... with a song, you degenerates.
In another pre-recorded bit, we see Christina took her team to meet Jay Leno, and I laugh harder than I have laughed at anything Jay Leno has ever said. I understand synergy, and a trip to Fallon in New York would probably have been inconvenient, but talk about the wrong demographic for (relatively) young performers trying to make it big. Jay makes the usual car-collector jokes and everyone politely titters. Also: “You don’t want to try too hard to be funny,” Christina says, lobbing me a nice big softball that I’m going to ignore for your sakes.
Christina offers one last piece of advice to her team: Listen. To the howls of America, clamoring for blood and humiliation? Actually, these guys look a little less like they’re going to vomit everywhere than Team Blake did, I’ll give them that.
America chooses to spare Jesse Campbell, Lindsey Pavao, and Chris Mann, placing Ashley De La Rosa, Sera Hill, and Moses Stone on the altar, Abraham’s scythe poised over their heads, where it’ll stay for the next half hour or so, because we have to get through the Culling of Team Blake first.
Our Last Chance Performances from Team Blake:
Naia performs “If I Were a Boy,” which caters a little more to her range and style than Adele. She does really well, though some of those tics are back. Blake is sad she didn’t do reggae, but she bleats that that wasn’t an option.
Charlotte does The Goo Goo Dolls’ “Iris.” I love this song unabashedly, so maybe that’s the reason that I don’t find her rendition particularly moving, and it starts a bit flat. Her emotion in the chorus serves her well, but it doesn’t feel like quite enough to save her.
Especially because Jordis goes with “Wild Horses,” and she sounds so much like The Sundays, and the ending of Buffy’s “The Prom” episode pops into my mind, and my living room is all of a sudden just covered in dust and there’s something in my eye. AHEM. She pretty much nails it.
Because these three haven’t suffered enough, we have to ask the other three coaches whom they would save from the Wrath of the American Public. Christina was feeling so emotional, she can’t choose! This does not compute with Carsonbot, who forces her to name someone: Jordis. Cee Lo and Adam are also Team Jordis, because, obviously. It’s so obvious, in fact, that Blake mercifully keeps his hemming and hawing to a couple courtesies before rescuing Jordis from the jaws of a second defeat and feeding Charlotte and Naia to the lions of post-loss depression.
And for Team Christina’s “Lose Yourself” moments:
Ashley rocks the hell out of “Paris (Ooh La La).” Man, I wish I had had that level of confidence at 17. Again, she genuinely looks like she’s having a blast, and manages to walk the line between “cutely awesome” and “trying way too hard.”
Sera performs “Vision of Love.” It’s not that she doesn’t have stage presence, and it’s not that she can’t sing, because she certainly can, but if you’re going to beat Ashley stomping around and kicking the stage’s ass, you need to do something more than just sing well.
Moses goes with “Break Even/Falling to Pieces.” Ah, there’s that voice we keep hearing about. He’s got the crowd worked up — Adam was right when he said the kid knows how to entertain, even if it’s not quite as dynamic a performance as usual.
And now it’s time to put these poor children out of their immediate misery, in one way or another, but not before milking the coaches’ appearances for all they’re worth: Cee Lo would save Sera. Adam babbles for a life-age of Middle Earth before picking Ashley. Blake is also on Ashley’s side. And Christina Herself? Ashley!
While Carsonbot short-circuits on live TV, stumbling through nonsense like “Oh, Blake’s getting onstage 001011101000010101” and exhorting us to stay tuned for Fashion Star, which is definitely a television show NBC wants you to acknowledge exists, I’ll note that we’ll be back next week, Same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel, but with Teams Adam and Cee Lo. Until then, continue to pray for the Return of the Prodigal Cat.

Hey there, gang. I’ll be your guide for the foreseeable future here in Voiceland, where the demo ratings never sink below 2.0 and the main question of the evening is, “BUT WHERE IS PURRFECT?”
Previously, on The Voice: The Blind Auditions hooked me pretty much instantly. Blake and Adam were kind of adorable, Cee Lo pet a cat, and Xtina’s boobs heart grew three sizes some days. Oh, and they upgraded Carson Daly’s Empathyware.
Then came the Battle Rounds, which were less bloody than my inner Capitol-dweller might have liked but which did occasionally make my ears bleed. The coaches made some poor decisions while halving their teams.
On to tonight’s show! Which... Hey guys, did you know this is a LIVE SHOW? No, really! Anyway, tonight, we’ll Godzilla our way through Teams Blake and Christina. As a reminder...
On Team Blake we have:
Charlotte “My Name Is An Insufferable Diablo Cody Movie Waiting to Happen” Sometimes
Erin “The Overthinker” Willett
Jermaine “Yeah, I Back-up Danced for Alicia Keys” Paul
Jordis “Rock Star: INXS” Unga
Naia “Dreadlocks" Kete
RaeLynne “My Name Sounds the Same As That U.S. Marshal on FX”
And on Team Christina we have:
Ashley “That Overachieving Girl in High School Who I May Have Been As Well” De La Rosa
Jesse “My Life Was a Will Smith Movie” Campbell
Lindsey “Two Hairstyles, No Waiting” Pavao
Moses “The MC Everyone Made a Big Deal About” Stone
Chris “My Voice Contains Multitudes, Almost Literally” Mann
Sera “Christina Just Had to Jump Onstage and Sing With Me, and That’s All Anyone Can Remember” Hill
In case you forgot what’s at stake: a contract with Universal Republic. Also, everlasting fame and glory. (Ha! Just kidding. Ask last season’s winner Javier Colon, who I had to look up.)
In the time between filming the Battle Rounds and now, Cee Lo stole Adam’s hair, which is a bummer for both, and he appears to be channeling the ghost of James Brown. Christina looks positively demure, and also amazing. Blake looks like he always looks, which is to say: good.
First up...
Jermaine Paul
He’ll be doing Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ On A Prayer,” a song that, despite being awesome, gives me hives because of a particularly unpleasant Dance Marathon experience where they played this at hour 15 of 30. Ugh. No one could argue he’s a dull performer, but he’s a little off — usually he’s way more charismatic.
Let’s hear from the coaches:
Christina is glad he worked the stage, but didn’t quite feel the connection with the song.
Blake would like him to savor the moment, because girls love him and his single is gonna sell like hotcakes on iTunes.
Chris Mann
Chris got tired of people trying to shrink his voice down. So he’s going all operatic on Simon &amp; Garfunkel’s “Bridge Over Troubled Water” while recording the track. I dunno, Mann.
My fears are founded: He’s almost too good a voice for this song. While his voice is big, there isn’t that vulnerability in there that makes this more than just a run-of-the-mill ballad. The shots of his cancer-riddled mom in the audience make me feel awful for thinking these things.
The coaches feel differently than I, of course:
Adam loves the choice, and though he was skeptical initially, he’s pleased with the result.
Cee Lo managed to avoid being reduced to tears, unlike last week with his own team. But that doesn’t mean he wasn’t moved!
Christina says it was “so, so beautiful and heartfelt,” and he really dug into the emotion and owned it. Hmph.
RaeLynne
The Little Farmgirl That Could dons her brass cojones once again and sings something related to a coach. This time, it’s an actual Maroon 5 song: “Wake Up Call.” But country-fried.
And maybe it’s because she’s charming, or I’ve been in a country mood lately, but it actually works. She’s getting a little drowned out by the band and is definitely breathy, but it’s the most fun performance thus far.
And what does Mr. Maroon 5 think?
Well, Adam says he’s had his heart broken twice by her, now: once when she picked Blake over him, and now when she did his song so well. Aw. (What? I am not made of stone.)
Christina loves the sass and alludes to the Greatest Love Affair of Our Time: “Again with the Maroon 5, Blake?” Hush, Christina. Let them have their love.
Blake thinks she’s the voice (GET IT, Y’ALL?) of a new generation of country music. And an interesting tidbit: The countrification of that song was actually Adam’s idea several months ago.
Moses Stone
Remember that MC they made a big deal about in the Blind Auditions and then we didn’t actually see his audition? That’s Moses Stone. He’s going to do Kanye (“Stronger”/”POWER”). I’m thinking this is good choice for a performer like--
Oh. With Kanye, you get some melody, but this kid is literally just shouting. Christina is leading the back-up dancers from her chair. I am sitting stone-faced on my couch.
Coaches?
Adam can tell this kid knows how to entertain people. But he’s also going to drop some truth bombs: Moses can sing, and that didn’t come out here. He has more potential as a singer than a rapper. Blake concurs.
Christina doesn’t care — Moses EXCITES her.
Naia Kete
The dreadlocked girl I forgot about from Team Blake is going to do “Turning Tables.” Okay. Can we please place a moratorium on everyone but Adele performing Adele songs in singing competitions? You are not Adele, everyone. Naia’s voice just lacks the fullness that lends the original track a lot of its depth. She’s playing down some of the vocal tics from her previous performances, which is an improvement, but it pales in comparison, and you can’t not compare, because the original is literally everywhere.
Coaches?
Christina would have picked something more reggae-ish. This is the closest to out-and-out negativity we’ve come, tonight.
Blake wanted Naia to stick closer to the original, though, to prove she has range. Which... she didn’t really do. Also: “Your tender moments are so special.” New euphemism!
Lindsey Pavao
She’s taking “Somebody That I Used to Know” by Gotye in a more dubstep direction? No! Stay away from the dubstep! Her vocal style, which didn’t bug me before, has begun to grate, and her bemasked back-up dancers are nightmare-inducing.
Coaches?
Adam is similarly freaked out by the back-up dancers. He says it was cool, but he missed the power in the chorus.
Christina loves that she took part in creating the arrangement, blah blah true artistry blah.
Jordis Unga
Jordis gets “Alone” by Heart. It’s always nice to hear a full female voice, even if she gets a little squeaky. The acoustic environment is also not doing her a whole lot of favors. Overall, she does well. Her family is wearing grass skirts. Endearing!
Coaches!
Cee Lo gives her a “good,” while Christina makes pouty faces. Blake likes that she didn’t play it safe. “I’m so glad America has a chance to find out who you are.” You mean again, right, Blake?
Sera Hill
Sera rearranges “Find Your Love” by Drake into something a little more melodic. She’s got a bunch of shirtless back-up dancers all up on her, and I’m having trouble concentrating.
So is Blake, I’m relieved to hear. This activates Carsonbot’s joke algorithm: Blake’s stuck on the shirtless guys! Ha ha! Can he think of nothing else to say? “She did great. There was male strippers on the stage.” Blake, do they not teach verb agreement in Oklahoma? Christina is over the moon, naturally.
Erin Willett
Poor Erin lost her dad to cancer during the Battle Rounds, so I’m going to try and not be horribly snarky. She performs Stevie Wonder’s “Living for the City.” She’s shown before she can be an overthinker, but tonight she looks and sounds great. It’s easily the best performance of the night.
Coaches?
Hey, Blake agrees with me! Cee Lo calls her a champion, especially for being that great under such trying circumstances.
Ashley De La Rosa
Ashley’s singing “Right Through You” by Alanis. The acoustics rear their ugly head again, and it’s a shame, because she sounds pretty good, when you can hear her. She’s also the only one who’s seemed like she’s having any fun, with that unconsciousness that only true self-assurance brings.
Coaches say...
Adam performs a quick age-check on Ashley and rediscovers she’s only 17. So he settles for saying she’s definitely Most Improved: “Tonight, we saw a woman.” That doesn’t turn her 18, Levine.
Charlotte Sometimes
Charlotte gets Paramore’s “Misery Business” and goes with a “haunting” version of the song. It’s...fine, I guess. She vamps a lot, and her voice is good enough.
Coaches?
Adam thinks it was great, and her voice is unique, though there were a few flat notes. Christina disagrees, and Blake, too, loved her idea for the arrangement.
Jesse Campbell
Last up is Jesse, who Christina says can “sing the phone book.” So he’s doing... “What a Wonderful World” by Louis Armstrong. Look, I love this song. It’s wonderful. It’s just not a song you make a performance out of. He’s a mite bit too smooth, and it ends up sounding like it was run through the Disney wringer.
What’s that, coaches? You disagree?
Cee Lo’s heart has been won, and wants Jesse to win if no one from Team Cee Lo can. Adam seconds this motion.
Christina loves him and repeats the phone book thing, then says out of the blue that she’s the only sober coach up there, which brings up a good point: This would be way more awesome with inebriated coaches. Truth-bombs everywhere!
And with that, we sign off! I’ll see y’all again tomorrow for the post-execution, er, post. Hopefully we won’t be deprived of Purrfect a second consecutive evening.
Image Credit: NBC
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Theatrics slapstick and cheer are cinematic qualities you rarely find outside the realm of animation. Disney perfected it with their pantheon of cartoon classics mixing music humor spectacle and light-hearted drama that swept up children while still capturing the imaginations and hearts of their parents. But these days even reinterpretations of fairy tales get the gritty make-over leaving little room for silliness and unfiltered glee. Emerging through that dark cloud is Mirror Mirror a film that achieves every bit of imagination crafted by its two-dimensional predecessors and then some. Under the eye of master visualist Tarsem Singh (The Fall Immortals) Mirror Mirror's heightened realism imbues it with the power to pull off anything — and the movie never skimps on the anything.
Like its animated counterparts Mirror Mirror stays faithful to its source material but twists it just enough to feel unique. When Snow White (Lily Collins) was a little girl her father the King ventured into a nearby dark forest to do battle with an evil creature and was never seen or heard from again. The kingdom was inherited by The Queen (Julia Roberts) Snow's evil stepmother and the fair-skinned beauty lived locked up in the castle until her 18th birthday. Grown up and tired of her wicked parental substitute White sneaks out of the castle to the village for the first time. There she witnesses the economic horrors The Queen has imposed upon the people of her land all to fuel her expensive beautification. Along the way Snow also meets Prince Alcott (Armie Hammer) who is suffering from his own money troubles — mainly being robbed by a band of stilt-wearing dwarves. When the Queen catches wind of the secret excursion she casts Snow out of the castle to be murdered by her assistant Brighton (Nathan Lane).
Fairy tales take flack for rejecting the idea of women being capable but even with its flighty presentation and dedication to the old school Disney method Mirror Mirror empowers its Snow White in a genuine way thanks to Collins' snappy charming performance. After being set free by Brighton Snow crosses paths with the thieving dwarves and quickly takes a role on their pilfering team (which she helps turn in to a Robin Hooding business). Tarsem wisely mines a spectrum of personalities out of the seven dwarves instead of simply playing them for one note comedy. Sure there's plenty of slapstick and pun humor (purposefully and wonderfully corny) but each member of the septet stands out as a warm compassionate companion to Snow even in the fantasy world.
Mirror Mirror is richly designed and executed in true Tarsem-fashion with breathtaking costumes (everything from ball gowns to the dwarf expando-stilts to ridiculous pirate ship hats with working canons) whimsical sets and a pitch-perfect score by Disney-mainstay Alan Menken. The world is a storybook and even its monsters look like illustrations rather than photo-real creations. But what makes it all click is the actors. Collins holds her own against the legendary Julia Roberts who relishes in the fun she's having playing someone despicable. She delivers every word with playful bite and her rapport with Lane is off-the-wall fun. Armie Hammer riffs on his own Prince Charming physique as Alcott. The only real misgiving of the film is the undercooked relationship between him and Snow. We know they'll get together but the journey's half the fun and Mirror Mirror serves that portion undercooked.
Children will swoon for Mirror Mirror but there's plenty here for adults — dialogue peppered with sharp wisecracks and a visual style ripped from an elegant tapestry. The movie wears its heart on its sleeve and rarely do we get a picture where both the heart and the sleeve feel truly magical.
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In a post-Harry Potter Avatar and Lord of the Rings world the descriptors "sci-fi" and "fantasy" conjure up particular imagery and ideas. The Hunger Games abolishes those expectations rooting its alternate universe in a familiar reality filled with human characters tangible environments and terrifying consequences. Computer graphics are a rarity in writer/director Gary Ross' slow-burn thriller wisely setting aside effects and big action to focus on star Jennifer Lawrence's character's emotional struggle as she embarks on the unthinkable: a 24-person death match on display for the entire nation's viewing pleasure. The final product is a gut-wrenching mature young adult fiction adaptation diffused by occasional meandering but with enough unexpected choices to keep audiences on their toes.
Panem a reconfigured post-apocalyptic America is sectioned off into 12 unique districts and ruled under an iron thumb by the oppressive leaders of The Capitol. To keep the districts producing their specific resources and prevent them from rebelling The Capitol created The Hunger Games an annual competition pitting two 18-or-under "tributes" from each district in a battle to the death. During the ritual tribute "Reaping " teenage Katniss (Lawrence) watches as her 12-year-old sister Primrose is chosen for battle—and quickly jumps to her aid becoming the first District 12 citizen to volunteer for the games. Joined by Peeta (Josh Hutcherson) a meek baker's son and the second tribute Effie the resident designer and Haymitch a former Hunger Games winner-turned-alcoholic-turned-mentor Katniss rides off to The Capitol to train and compete in the 74th Annual Hunger Games.
The greatest triumph of The Hunger Games is Ross' rich realization of the book's many worlds: District 12 is painted as a reminiscent Southern mining town haunting and vibrant; The Capitol is a utopian metropolis obsessed with design and flair; and The Hunger Games battleground is a sprawling forest peppered with Truman Show-esque additions that remind you it's all being controlled by overseers. The small-scale production value adds to the character-first approach and even when the story segues to larger arenas like a tickertape parade in The Capitol's grand Avenue of Tributes hall it's all about Katniss.
For fans the script hits every beat a nearly note-for-note interpretation of author Suzanne Collins' original novel—but those unfamiliar shouldn't worry about missing anything. Ross knows his way around a sharp screenplay (he's the writer of Big Pleasantville and Seabiscuit) and he's comfortable dropping us right into the action. His characters are equally as colorful as Panem Harrelson sticking out as the former tribute enlivened by the chance to coach winners. He's funny he's discreet he's shaded—a quality all the cast members share. As a director Ross employs a distinct often-grating perspective. His shaky cam style emphasizes the reality of the story but in fight scenarios—and even simple establishing shots of District 12's goings-on—the details are lost in motion blur.
But the dread of the scenario is enough to make Hunger Games an engrossing blockbuster. The lead-up to the actual competition is an uncomfortable and biting satire of reality television sports and everything that commands an audience in modern society. Katniss' brooding friend Gale tells her before she departs "What if nobody watched?" speculating that carnage might end if people could turn away. Unfortunately they can't—forcing Katniss and Peeta to become "stars" of the Hunger Games. The duo are pushed to gussy themselves up put on a show and play up their romance for better ratings. Lawrence channels her reserved Academy Award-nominated Winter's Bone character to inhabit Katniss' frustration with the system. She's great at hunting but she doesn't want to kill. She's compassionate and considerate but has no interest in bowing down to the system. She's a leader but she knows full well she's playing The Capitol's game. Even with 23 other contestants vying for the top spot—like American Idol with machetes complete with Ryan Seacrest stand-in Caesar Flickerman (the dazzling Stanley Tucci)—Katniss' greatest hurdle is internal. A brave move for a movie aimed at a young audience.
By the time the actual Games roll around (the movie clocks in at two and a half hours) there's a need to amp up the pace that never comes and The Hunger Games loses footing. Katniss' goal is to avoid the action hiding in trees and caves waiting patiently for the other tributes to off themselves—but the tactic isn't all that thrilling for those watching. Luckily Lawrence Hutcherson and the ensemble of young actors still deliver when they cross paths and particular beats pack all the punch an all-out deathwatch should. PG-13 be damned the film doesn't skimp on the bloodshed even when it comes to killing off children. The Hunger Games bites off a lot for the first film of a franchise and does so bravely and boldly. It may not make it to the end alive but it doesn't go down without a fight.
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