Thursday, 12 November 2015

As I Approach 22...

As the older half of Split the City, I have the scary delight of turning 22 this month. As much as I'm excited to legitimately sing THAT Taylor Swift song all year round, 22 seemed a scary age to me for a while;

It's not 21, where you've just reached official adulthood and can still be excused for mishaps....it's not 20, where you're not 21 yet...and it's certainly not 19, where you're still a teenager. 22 is a grown age.

However, for what may be the first time ever, I'm somewhat prepared for this age. I've had the most difficult year of my life, and I've learnt a few difficult lessons, but they've all brought me to a place in my life where I feel confident and prepared.

As I approach 22, here is what I know:

1. Friends and Family Are Everything

There were more than a few points this year where I felt like I was drowning. The world tends to work quite cruelly, and instead of giving you one problem at a time, you get all the issues all at once, and then a scary amount of nothingness once it's over. Life is overwhelming. But the cute guy at Starbucks isn't going to help you through this, and nor are the Kardashians.

Dedicate your time to the people who have been their from the start (your family) and to those who will be there at the end (your friends). They accept you for the bizarre, glorious mess are, and the want to help you when you need that support!

Be good to them all, they're everything.

2. You Are Not Fat

I know this crops up on every 'life advice' list ever, and every time you read it you'll roll your eyes and think, 'yeah but I am though...'. For goodness sake, you are not fat. And after years of dueling with my body confidence it feels so damn good to say I AM NOT FAT. ....and if I was, who really cares?

As long as a person is of a weight that doesn't affect their physical health, then they're healthy.
It's taken me until the ripe old age of (nearly) 22 to figure out there are bigger things to concern yourself with other than our clothes size - take up a cause! Look into politics and research feminism....and if you have time to go to the gym then great, but if not then breathe...that's fine.
I love my body, and that's such a refreshing thing to write.

3. Write It Down
I am a chronic over-thinker (and this beautiful Miss Nikki will own up to this trait too). I'm sensitive, constantly busy and always memorising Pinterest quotes. To de-clutter my brain I've turned to the masterful art of just writing everything down. I have a diary for my day-to-day activities, a notebook of recipes, a notebook of quotes and scribble, a journal just for life's ponderings.....seriously my room is at least 40% covered in stationary.
I don't care if it makes me a geek, I'm happier and I'm clearer.

4. Learn How to be Happy in Your Own Company
This is the saddest thing I lost this year. My idea of heaven used to be sitting in a coffee shop, alone, with a great book, and quietly watching the world go by. But life happens and you get insecure, and start detesting your own company. It's so important to be okay on your own, and I'm slowly relearning that.
Time with your own thoughts might seem scary, but you're going to have to face you at some point.
I'm trying to have one evening ENTIRELY to myself at least once a week; it sounds like nothing, but it's getting me there. Maybe it has absolutely no affect on everyone's self confidence, but being alone sometimes is helping me accept me.

5. Do You
It's all well and good reading through what I've figure out, and then either implementing some of my routine into yours or dismissing it as rambling nonsense. At the end of the day you've got to find your own path.
Sometimes you have to wade through a pile of s*** to get to some place good, and sometimes you don't. Sometimes you'll feel ecstatically happy and sometimes you won't. Stop comparing yourself to others because you're not living their life, and they're not living yours; that's a beautiful thing!
Just have a bit of faith in the universe, I reckon it knows what it's doing.