Sunday, September 03, 2006

Guest Poster - Tatooine the Tauntaun [Topic - Mommy was acting weird]

THE FOLLOWING HAS BEEN TRANSLATED USING THE LANGORIAN UNIVERSAL TRANSLATOR:

My name is me! I have a mommy and an aunt. My aunt doesn't like me too much... My mommy's name is mommy!

Last the night before last my mommy came home really late, and when I went to see her, she couldn't open the thing that opens to come in. She was laughing really hard. It made me happy.

But then she came in...

"'Ello 'aby... Yo'r mommy ish a little buzz'd..."

Was mommy stung by a wookie bee? I rubbed against her leg, and looked up at her. But whenever I rubbed against her leg, she stumbled and fell to the ground. I had hurt my mommy! Then she began to laugh...

"Gentle... Gentle..." she began to laugh more, "aby... 'elp yor mommy to her room."

"Okay Mommy..." I pushed her up using my head.

"Mmm'kay..." she said as she stumbled against the ship walls, and found her door, she opened it, and she went inside... She fell onto her bed, "'aby..."

I ran to my mommy, she was acting weird... she needed me... I put my head over the bed, and I looked at her.

"Yes mommy," I said as I sat down staring at her, as her eyes began to close.

"Mommy stop being sick," I said to her.

She was tossing and turning all night. She kept speaking to the wall about some nice lady called Nepharia, and Screwdrivers, and Klingon Blood and Captain Picard... And a man named Tak... A man named Jon and a a Hutt... A cyclops who drinks fire-water like a Typhoon.

Mommy was going crazy... I wanted to make sure she was okay. I couldn't leave her. If I did she might leave me...

I laid on the bed next to her, and she hugged me...

"'m mmkay'aby..."

I fell asleep next to her, when I woke the next morning, she sat up. She groaned, and held her head.

"Tatooine... I'll spend the day with you... Just leave your mommy alone for right now..."

Mommy hates me! She wants me to leave her alone. I ran to my room crying. I curled up in the corner, and I put my head on my bubblebubkin. He makes me smile when I'm sad...

Star Wars and all related characters are trademarks of Lucasfilm Ltd. This site is intended as a parody. As such, use of copyrighted and trademarked images is allowed under Fair Use. Erifia Apoc, Becca the Magnificant and Tatooine the Tauntaun, are all characters made by the author, using some Lucasfilm Ltd. Ideas.