I am beginning to see now just what it is I have done for myself in this lifetime. I am beginning to understand the extent and the depth of the work that I have done with and on behalf of myself. I am beginning to allow for the seeds that I so bravely planted within to truly take root and to crack open the surface and begin to show. And with this I am beginning to acknowledge just how grateful I am for my own persistency, courage and unwavering faith. Sure, there have been moments when my mind has questioned just about everything and I have felt like giving up; I’m even sure there are many more of those moments to come. But at the end of the day I still have myself to thank for pulling myself through the tough stuff and believing in the good of all. I have stared myself in the eyes oscillating between feeling everything from and including intense self-loathing and good old unconditional love, but however dark things have sometimes tended to seem, I never forgot about light. And so finally I am truly beginning to see that I have really been there for myself through it all. I’m seeing that all past little versions of me have brought me safely to this moment, this magnificent moment we call the present. So, without of course neglecting the importance of the people who have always been around, I realize that I, more than anyone, am to thank for, for this precious moment. Just as much as I am to blame for all the times I have not acknowledged the geniality and beauty of life I am also to thank for all those other times when I actually did manage to open my eyes to the wonder of the world. Though blaming is of no purpose, I know that now, because even what we perceive as mistakes and all that we take on as guilt which wears us down has its reason too: to teach us lessons in unconditional love.

I understand it is rather rare and uncomfortable to see yourself as the hero of your own life and I suppose it is because people too seldom feel capable and too seldom are encouraged to essentially be the divine hero of their own life. I’m not saying we shouldn’t look for support and seek help, on the contrary we should definitely be more open to let others be there for us through thick and thin- but without faith in our own potential and without our own support to our self we are mere infants helplessly wandering this hazardous earth. So once we have physically grown beyond the stage of infancy we must slowly but surely metaphysically grow into our own loving parent, god or goddess. Without developing this inward support of the self we cannot yet embody the full magnitude of who we have the potential to become. Parents teach us about this, they are the examples of the loving parents that we are meant to develop within by showing us how to love us unconditionally. Though all parents, as they are people too, are flawed and make mistakes of their own, meaning they usually too have more to learn about the subject of unconditional loving, we must strive to become the better parent and learn from all given lessons. The better parent is the one who loves even more, not in a competitive way, but in a forgiving, brave, naked and vulnerable way. The better parent is the person who loves him/herself extensively through everything and who, thanks to this love, knows how to love all other beings and moments just the same way, and who dedicates his/her life to simply be an expression of that love. The better parent is he/she who forgives their own parents and all others just as he/she forgives himself for he/she understands that all things are merely different aspects of the same thing: the desire for love to express itself in one way or another.

So what do I really want to say? Well, I suppose I really just want to thank my inner parent, my divinity within, for never leaving me and for helping me get back to where I can see the bigger picture, for taking care of and comforting all my inner children who were once hurt, holding their hands until they were finally ready to leave happily and allow me to continue onto the next adventure. It is not without a big bunch of humility that I bow down to my own inner being because I for one know what resistance I have many times put up. The beauty of it is that in seeing that it is this unconditionally loving being of light within me that brought me to be- I can now peacefully merge with it. With all the gratitude my heart can bear I now surrender to my own magnificence, allowing for all the love it holds to be expressed entirely and freely through me.

Because such is the human being that she isn’t only the facilitator of love- she is love manifested.