Wednesday, February 6, 2013

One low treatment does not fit all

I go low during the night fairly often. Be it from exercise
that evening, over-correcting a high or not having my basal rates set right.
Some might argue it’s because I just don’t care very much before I go to bed. I don't really. I
still think weird things happen to my body while I sleep.

That’s not the point of this post though.

It’s what I choose to treat my lows with.

Think of a confused, discombobulated and disoriented puppy.
Think, "What could be the farthest away from the bed at any given moment in time?" I
keep Dex tabs in my night stand. The kitchen is directly on the other side of
the bedroom door which is a bi-fold door (don't ask, we rent) that is permanently opened because the
chin-up bar is now mounted there.

When I wake up low, I always fumble to test first. As if the shortness of breath, shaking and sweating isn't an indication. First mistake.
Sometimes I think it’s because I know it’ll help my meter average go down if
there are some 2.0mmol/l (36mg/dl) thrown in there for good luck. One might think rolling
over and choking back some Dex right away would do it. That’s what I think, too, when I am
awake and coherent. Instead I often find myself rummaging through the pantry for
the raisins or digging through the closet trying to rip open a package of juice
boxes. An unopened package of juice boxes of course. Occasionally I
may be found wandering aimlessly through the apartment wondering what I did
with that specific roll of sour apple Dex I had 3 weeks ago. Maybe I left it in
my car, just let me grab my keys, I’ll be right back. You get the picture.

I go low and for some reason, deep inside my core I always
need something that is not easily accessible. When really it’s right beside me.
Why do I make things so fucking difficult for myself?

I’ve spent many times wondering why I do this. I cannot be convinced
at that moment because there is no such thing as thinking clearly while low and
half asleep at 2am. It’s like trying to push an ox uphill. I've never pushed an
ox.

I also know that one low treatment does not fit all. I have
3 things I treat lows with. Juice, Dex and raisins. I rarely ever vary from those items. The choice depends on the low and
my mood (which could be just as volatile). Juice is something that is only at home and work. I get a lot of
nausea with lows sometimes and juice is too much substance for me to swallow which makes me feel sick. I ADORE raisins but
can’t justify eating them any other time because of the havoc they wreck on my beeg. They are my “tasty treat” for the lows that aren't debilitating but somewhat more manageable. Dex, well that’s just the easy to carry, holds up to
everything, all-encompassing and indestructible low treatment. Oh and I can't forget... fucking disgusting.

What gets me is that if I have juice next to me I’ll go for
raisins. If I have raisins and Dex, I’ll go for juice... etc. My brain seems to get
off on making fixing the low as hard as possible and I DON’T GET WHY!

Ryan gets on my case when he sees me rummaging through the
closet fighting with the juice boxes. He’s got a good grasp on my low quirks.
He gets me spoons of PB as low chasers. He stays up until I've come back to
earth and fallen back asleep.

So the other night I found this little care package beside
the bed.

2 juice boxes, a small container of raisins and a
ready-to-go PB lollipop (in case of emergency, remove plastic wrap!). I can’t help but wonder what he’s trying to tell me!

I have 5 guesses...

1.) Quit waking me up crinkling juice packages.

2.) I'm tired of going for the PB so I thought I'd bring it to you. I get back to sleep faster.

3.) It's all right there! I don't want to chase after you while you wander aimlessly around the apartment like a zombie.

4.) No you can't have something else, these are your choices.

5.) Seriously, get back to bed and quit it.

I'm surprised he didn't put a bib and tissues for the mess I make and the blood spots I leave on the sheets.

In all honesty, Those are jokes.

Seriously though. He nudges me to test when my 1am alarm goes off and I ignore it. He makes sure I'm okay before he even considers going back to sleep (even if I've already passed out with Dex in my mouth). Most importantly, he has paid enough attention to recognize my low habits. He put these things beside the bed for me and I didn't even say anything.

Maybe he thinks I should plan better though. Just maybe.

Last night I rolled over, tested, low, drank juce, moaned for a bit and went back to bed. I didn't have to get up at all! It was sweet.

That's really sweet! Honestly, not only is it cute that he took the initiative, it's really cool that he seems to understand the emotional burden of 'betes, and try to ease that for you. What a guy!! (Ryan: My husband's name is Dennis. Feel free to contact him directly and let him know that this is a winning move for a dude.)

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I am Scully!

Just an active outdoors Canadian girl aspiring to race my bike and not suck so much. Diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes over 13 years ago at the ripe old age of 22. My writings are fueled by diabetes, anxiety disorder, sensory processing issues and general dislike of everything. I have no filter and really don't give a fuck, there's your warning.