Our D/s and How Things Change

This is a post I started writing a couple of months ago, but seeing a few others here talking about D/s and BDSM and the changes from what you believed when new and what you believe now, I decided to share too.

We (Daddy and I) have, what I think is, a great relationship. Great communication, great understanding, great dynamic in our D/s relationship. Don’t get me wrong, we have our disagreements. We have our misunderstandings and, yes, we can both be hard-headed. I am submissive, and yet I am what Daddy calls cheeky at times. I speak my mind and can get fired up at times if I believe something strongly or feel someone I love is being hurt. It’s just who I am. But then, I have my submissive side, that loves to take care of things (especially Daddy) and do things to make him and others happy. I love the way he takes care of me, protects me and guides me. I respect him for who and how he is.

I have spent most of my life taking care of my family, being the one to make the decisions and be strong for those around me. So that side of me comes out at times, when needed, when he expects me to follow his lead as his submissive. And even though I fight it, I always go back to doing so. It is that part of D/s that I need, to be able to hand over my control and follow his guidance so that I can find my centre, step away from the stress and anxiety, and just be his.

That being said, I have really changed my perspective and opinions since I was new to D/s and BDSM. I know for a fact I was in what they call “sub frenzy” for the first year of finding, getting to know and understanding BDSM and D/s. Any Dom that gave me attention or “wanted” me as theirs I immediately fell for. I did anything I could to show them I was a great submissive. It was all about showing how good I could be by doing as they said, even if it led me to get into trouble. Or showing I could be so responsive to doing what they wanted me to sexually. (Of course that was virtual, not actually in a RL situation)

I was very naive and trusting. But, the more I researched, learned and talked to people, the more I realized there was so much more. I finally decided I was being foolish, crazy and could get myself hurt, so was going to just keep researching and learning and not get involved with anyone. Looking back, I was really lucky. The only things getting hurt was my pride, self-esteem and feelings.

Then I met Daddy. It’s always when you’re not looking that you meet a great person, especially one that makes a big difference in your life. We just started talking, liked a lot of the same things, shared in a curiosity of certain things and just clicked. Our friendship bloomed and for two people not looking for anyone, we have moved our relationship slowly to something so much more. We are not only learning our own likes and dislikes, but each other’s as well. Starting off as a LDR (long distance relationship) and working toward a RL 24/7 relationship is hard. It is always proving difficult and frustrating but we are muscling through it and we will get there.

When we are together, I am happy and calm for the most part. It is hard to be in this LDR, but we are both wanting it to go further once we are able to. We both have things we are dealing with in our own separate lives to get us to that point.

We come together at times when we can, and feed off of one another and enjoy our time together where we can dive into our dynamic. It never fails that we both fall into a low once we have to part, and I know we are even stronger in our love once we come back together.

We look forward to the day when we will be together all the time. We know we will be in this lifestyle, in what is called a 24/7 D/s lifestyle. A lifestyle where we will push and pull each other, having that power exchange in so many ways. It will not always be a bed of roses, and we know this. We will of course have ups and downs but we will continue to communicate, compromise and work together through our issues. We will also enjoy learning and sharing new things together, as we already do.

I look forward to the future and what it holds for us. It’s been a rocky road at times but I know everything we go through will be worth it in the coming years.

Just a song I have fallen in love with recently. Enjoy!

Kat xx

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Published by katkinx

(*Gravatar Pic above is from Pinterest and an unknown artist)
I love kitties, one reason being Daddy calls me Kitten all the time, so thought it suited for a name for my blog (Kat). I love sharing my writing, ideas and things that concern and interest me. I started this blog to get things out of my head and down in writing so to help with my over-thinking, over-analyzing and over-everything mind. Thank you for letting me share. xx
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Great post, katkinx!!! I really long for this…”It is that part of D/s that I need, to be able to hand over my control and follow his guidance so that I can find my centre, step away from the stress and anxiety, and just be his.”

The way you met your partner sounds very like Michael and I… Online and neither really looking to find someone. We too were LDR and have always said it really taught us how to communicate and has helped us to continue to do so once we were together full time