Horror as gays are sent into Middle England B&Bs with inadequate armour

Gay couples are being sent to the front line in Middle England without sufficient backup, says a damning new report.

Many face the hypothetical horror of being turned away from the bed and breakfast of their choice, says an undercover investigation. In the worst case scenario, they may be forced to retreat, and find a more welcoming, open minded guest house. It's a chilling echo of incidents everyone in Britain has experienced at some stage.

Though nobody has died, or had their limbs blown off, or been hoodwinked into becoming a human sacrifice in an illegal war, the mood in Camp Bed and Breakfast was sombre yesterday. This is a battle that Britain cannot afford to lose. 'Please, god, won't somebody think about the children?' said the government's new Moral Authority Csar, Geoff Hoon, yesterday.