Lighten up a little and talk about movies, music, books and recipes and more... this forum provides the flip side to the intense and serious discussion taking place in other forums. No topic is off-limit here so long as it is within the accepted norms of decency and decorum.

The greatest 'shot in the arm'........ ..Encouragement
The greatest problem to overcome.... ........ ...Fear
The most effective sleeping pill....... Peace of mind
The most crippling failure disease..... ... .......Excuses

The most powerful force in life........ ............ . Love
The most dangerous act...... ..A gossip
The world's most incredible computer.... . ....The brain
The worst thing to be without..... ............ ..... Hope

The most beautiful attire...... ......... ........SMILE!
The most prized possession.. ........ .....Integrity
The most powerful channel of communication. ......Religion
The most contagious spirit...... .......... ......Enthusiasm

Life ends; when you stop Dreaming,
Hope ends; when you stop Believing,
Love ends; when you stop Caring, And Friendship ends;when you stop Sharing...!! !

This is a real life story of engineer John Roebling building the Brooklyn Bridge in New York, USA back in 1870. The bridge was completed in 1883, after 13 years.

In 1883, a creative engineer named John Roebling was inspired by an idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with the Long Island. However bridge building experts throughout the world thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to forget the idea. It just could not be done. It was not practical. It had never been done before.

Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about it all the time and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share the dream with someone else. After much discussion and persuasion he managed to convince his son Washington, an up and coming engineer, that the bridge in fact could be built.

Working together for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how it could be accomplished and how the obstacles could be overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, and the headiness of a wild challenge before them, they hired their crew and began to build their dream bridge.

The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was also injured and left with a certain amount of brain damage, which resulted in him not being able to talk or walk.

“We told them so.” “Crazy men and their crazy dreams.” “It’s foolish to chase wild visions.”

Everyone had a negative comment to make and felt that the project should be scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be built.

In spite of his handicap Washington was never discouraged and still had a burning desire to complete the bridge and his mind was still as sharp as ever. He tried to inspire and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task.

As he lay on his bed in his hospital room, with the sunlight streaming through the windows, a gentle breeze blew the flimsy white curtains apart and he was able to see the sky and the tops of the trees outside for just a moment.

It seemed that there was a message for him not to give up. Suddenly an idea hit him. All he could do was move one finger and he decided to make the best use of it. By moving this, he slowly developed a code of communication with his wife.

He touched his wife’s arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers what to do. It seemed foolish but the project was under way again.

For 13 years Washington tapped out his instructions with his finger on his wife’s arm, until the bridge was finally completed. Today the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one man’s indomitable spirit and his determination not to be defeated by circumstances. It is also a tribute to the engineers and their team work, and to their faith in a man who was considered mad by half the world. It stands too as a tangible monument to the love and devotion of his wife who for 13 long years patiently decoded the messages of her husband and told the engineers what to do.

Perhaps this is one of the best examples of a never-say-die attitude that overcomes a terrible physical handicap and achieves an impossible goal.

Often when we face obstacles in our day-to-day life, our hurdles seem very small in comparison to what many others have to face. The Brooklyn Bridge shows us that dreams that seem impossible can be realised with determination and persistence, no matter what the odds are.

If we could at this very moment, shrink the earth's population to just 100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following.

There would be:

57 Asians
21 Europeans
14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south
8 would be Africans
52 would be female
48 would be male
70 would be non-white
30 would be white
70 would be non-Christian
30 would be Christian

6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth and all 6 would be from the United States.

80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
(ONE)1 would be near death;
(ONE)1 would be near birth;
(ONE)1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education;
(ONE)1 (yes, only 1) would own a computer.

When one considers our world from such a compressed perspective, the need for acceptance, understanding and education becomes glaringly apparent.
And, therefore . . .

If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep, you are richer than 75% of this world.

If you woke up this morning with more health than illness, you are more blessed than the million who will not survive this week.

If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish someplace, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If you have never experienced the danger of battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation, you are ahead of 500 million people in the world.

If you hold up your head with a smile on your face and are truly thankful, you are blessed because the majority can, but most do not.

If you can read this message, you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at all.

As you read this and are reminded how life is in the rest of the world, remember just how blessed you really are!

Isn’t it amazing that George Carlin – comedian of the 70′s and 80′s – could write something so very eloquent…and so very appropriate.

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete…

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn’t cost a cent.

Remember, to say, ‘I love you’ to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. An embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.
Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

I scurried around the store, gathered up my goodies and headed for the checkout counter, only to be blocked in the narrow aisle by a young man who appeared to be about sixteen-years-old. I wasn't in a hurry, so I patiently waited for the boy to realize that I was there. This was when he waved his hands excitedly in the air and declared in a loud voice, "Mommy, I'm over here."

It was obvious now, he was mentally challenged and also startled as he turned and saw me standing so close to him, waiting to squeeze by. His eyes widened and surprise exploded on his face as I said, "Hey Buddy, what's your name?"

"My name is Denny and I'm shopping with my mother," he responded proudly.

I acknowledged her and continued to talk to Denny for several more minutes about summer, bicycles and school. I watched his brown eyes dance with excitement, because he was the centre of someone's attention. He then abruptly turned and headed toward the toy section.

Denny's mom had a puzzled look on her face and thanked me for taking the time to talk with her son. She told me that most people wouldn't even look at him, much less talk to him.

I told her that it was my pleasure and then I said something I have no idea where it came from, other than by the prompting of the Holy Spirit. I told her that there are plenty of red, yellow, and pink roses in God's Garden; however, "Blue Roses" are very rare and should be appreciated for their beauty and distinctiveness. You see, Denny is a Blue Rose and if someone doesn't stop and smell that rose with their heart and touch that rose with their kindness, then they've missed a blessing from God.

She reached out, squeezed my hand and said, "God bless you!" and then I had tears in my eyes.

May I suggest, the next time you see a BLUE ROSE, whichever differences that person may have, don't turn your head and walk off. Take the time to smile and say Hello. Why? Because, by the grace of GOD, this mother or father could be you. This could be your child, grandchild, niece,nephew or any other family member.What a difference a moment can mean to that person or their family.

From an old dandelion! Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.Leave the rest to the powers that be..

One stormy night many years ago, an elderly man and his wife entered the lobby of a small hotel in Philadelphia. Trying to get out of the rain, the couple approached the front desk hoping to get some shelter for the night.

“Could you possibly give us a room here?” the husband asked. The clerk, a friendly man with a winning smile, looked at the couple and explained that there were three conventions in town.

“All of our rooms are taken,” the clerk said. “But I can’t send a nice couple like you out into the rain at one o’clock in the morning. Would you perhaps be willing to sleep in my room? It’s not exactly a suite, but it will be good enough to make you folks comfortable for the night.”

When the couple declined, the young man pressed on. “Don’t worry about me; I’ll make out just fine,” the clerk told them. So the couple agreed.

As he paid his bill the next morning, the elderly man said to the clerk, “You are the kind of manager who should be the boss of the best hotel in the United States. Maybe someday I’ll build one for you.”
The clerk looked at them and smiled. The three of them had a good laugh.

As they drove away, the elderly couple agreed that the helpful clerk was indeed exceptional, as finding people who are both friendly and helpful isn’t easy.

Two years passed. The clerk had almost forgotten the incident when he received a letter from the old man. It recalled that stormy night and enclosed a round-trip ticket to New York, asking the young man to pay them a visit.

The old man met him in New York, and led him to the corner of Fifth Avenue and 34th Street. He then pointed to a great new building there, a palace of reddish stone, with turrets and watchtowers thrusting up to the sky.

“That,” said the older man, “is the hotel I have just built for you to manage.”
“You must be joking,” the young man said.
“I can assure you I am not,” said the older man, a sly smile playing around his mouth.

The older man’s name was William Waldorf Astor, and the magnificent structure was the original Waldorf-Astoria Hotel.
The young clerk who became its first manager was George C. Boldt. This young clerk never foresaw the turn of events that would lead him to become the manager of one of the world’s most glamorous hotels.

The Bible says that we are not to turn our backs on those who are in need, for we might be entertaining angels. Life is more accurately measured by the lives you touch than the things you acquire…

Boldt was the manager of Bellevue and not a clerk. He was a big shot already. He had his own suite of rooms in the hotel and when Astor walked in on that rainy night, Boldt knew him to be a really wealthy man. And the Waldorf was certainly not built for Boldt. You can look at the link for more details. Sorry to burst this bible bubble.

It will change your life (or at least, the way you react to situations) 10% of life is made up of what happens to you .... 90% of life is decided by how you react...

What does this mean?

We really have NO control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in the traffic. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.

How? ... By your reaction.

Do not let people fool you. YOU can control how you react.
Let us use an example... You are having breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what has just happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react. You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your wife and you criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows.

You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish her breakfast and getting ready to go to school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles per hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60.00 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minute late, you realize you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home. When you arrive home, you find a small wedge in your relationship with your wife and daughter.

Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?

A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is "D"

You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say: "It's okay, honey, you just need to be more careful next time." Grabbing a towel you go upstairs and change your shirt. You grab your briefcase, and you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early a cheerfully greet the staff.

Notice the difference?

Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.

Why? Because of how you reacted .

You really have no control over 10% of what happens in your life. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 Principle.

If someone says something negative about you, do not be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You do not have to let the negative comments affect you. React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, or getting stressed out. How do you react if someone cuts you off in the traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? (a friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off), Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Who cares if you arrive 10 seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 Principle and don't worry about it.
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time to find a new job. The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger, why stress out? It will just make things worse.

Now you know the 90/10 Principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it. The 90/10 Principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this Principle. The result? You will see it by yourself! Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and headaches. We all must understand and apply the 90/10 Principle. It can change your life! Enjoy it! It only takes willpower to give ourselves permission to make the experience. Absolutely everything we do, give, say, or even think, it's like a Boomerang. It will come back to us. If we want to receive, we need to learn to give first. Maybe we will end with our hands empty, but our heart will be filled with love. And those who love life, have that feeling marked in their hearts.

"The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful."

Life could be so much better for many people, if they would just spot their negative thinking habits and replace them with positive ones.

Negative thinking, in all its many-splendored forms, has a way of creeping into conversations and our thinking without our noticing them. The key to success, in my humble opinion, is learning to spot these thoughts and squash them like little bugs. Then replace them with positive ones. You'll notice a huge difference in everything you do.

Let's take a look at common ways that negative thinking emerges get good at spotting these patterns, and practice replacing them with positive thinking patterns. It has made all the difference in the world for me.

The Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking

1. I will be happy once I have _____ (or once I earn X).

Problem: If you think you can't be happy until you reach a certain point, or until you reach a certain income, or have a certain type of house or car or computer setup, you'll never be happy. That elusive goal is always just out of reach. Once we reach those goals, we are not satisfied we want more.

Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where you are, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn't have to be some state that we want to get to eventually it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessings, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.

2. I wish I were as ____ as (a celebrity, friend, co-worker).

Problem: We'll never be as pretty, as talented, as rich, as sculpted, as cool, as everyone else. There will always be someone better, if you look hard enough. Therefore, if we compare ourselves to others like this, we will always pale, and will always fail, and will always feel bad about ourselves. This is no way to be happy.

Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your successes, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who you are, right now, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.

3. Seeing others becoming successful makes me jealous and resentful.

Problem: First, this assumes that only a small number of people can be successful. In truth, many, many people can be successful in different ways.

Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understanding what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do. And even more, you already are successful. Look not at those above you in the social ladder, but those below you there are always millions of people worse off than you, people who couldn't even read this article or afford a computer. In that light, you are a huge success.

4. I am a miserable failure I can't seem to do anything right.

Problem: Everyone is a failure, if you look at it in certain ways. Everyone has failed, many times, at different things. I have certainly failed so many times I cannot count them and I continue to fail, daily. However, looking at your failures as failures only makes you feel bad about yourself. By thinking in this way, we will have a negative self-image and never move on from here.

Solution: See your successes and ignore your failures. Look back on your life, in the last month, or year, or 5 years. And try to remember your successes. If you have trouble with this, start documenting them keep a success journal, either in a notebook or online. Document your success each day, or each week. When you look back at what you've accomplished, over a year, you will be amazed. It's an incredibly positive feeling.

5. I'm going to beat so-and-so no matter what I'm better than him. There's no way I'll help him succeed he might beat me.

Problem: Competitiveness assumes that there is a small amount of gold to be had, and I need to get it before he does. It makes us into greedy, back-stabbing, hurtful people. We try to claw our way over people to get to success, because of our competitive feelings. For example, if a blogger wants to have more subscribers than another blogger, he may never link to or mention that other blogger. However, who is to say that my subscribers can't also be yours? People can read and subscribe to more than one blog.

Solution:Learn to see success as something that can be shared, and learn that if we help each other out, we can each have a better chance to be successful. Two people working towards a common goal are better than two people trying to beat each other up to get to that goal. There is more than enough success to go around. Learn to think in terms of abundance rather than scarcity.

6. Dammit! Why do these bad things always happen to me?

Problem: Bad things happen to everybody. If we dwell on them, they will frustrate us and bring us down.

Solution: See bad things as a part of the ebb and flow of life. Suffering is a part of the human condition but it passes. All pain goes away, eventually. Meanwhile, don't let it hold you back. Don't dwell on bad things, but look forward towards something good in your future. And learn to take the bad things in stride, and learn from them. Bad things are actually opportunities to grow and learn and get stronger, in disguise.

7. You can't do anything right! Why can't you be like ____ ?

Problem: This can be said to your child or your subordinate or your sibling. The problem? Comparing two people, first of all, is always a fallacy. People are different, with different ways of doing things, different strengths and weaknesses, different human characteristics. If we were all the same, we'd be robots. Second, saying negative things like this to another person never helps the situation. It might make you feel better, and more powerful, but in truth, it hurts your relationship, it will actually make you feel negative, and it will certainly make the other person feel negative and more likely to continue negative behavior. Everyone loses.

Solution: Take the mistakes or bad behavior of others as an opportunity to teach. Show them how to do something. Second, praise them for their positive behavior, and encourage their success. Last, and most important, love them for who they are, and celebrate their differences.

8. Your work sucks. It's super lame. You are a moron and I hope you never reproduce.

Problem: I've actually gotten this comment before. It feels wonderful. However, let's look at it not from the perspective of the person receiving this kind of comment but from the perspective of the person giving it. How does saying something negative like this help you? I guess it might feel good to vent if you feel like your time has been wasted. But really, how much of your time has been wasted? A few minutes? And whose fault is that? The bloggers or yours? In truth, making negative comments just keeps you in a negative mindset. It's also not a good way to make friends.

Solution: Learn to offer constructive solutions, first of all. Instead of telling someone their blog sucks, or that a post is lame, offer some specific suggestions for improvement. Help them get better. If you are going to take the time to make a comment, make it worth your time. Second, learn to interact with people in a more positive way it makes others feel good and it makes you feel better about yourself. And you can make some great friends this way. That's a good thing.

9. Insulting People Back

Problem: If someone insults you or angers you in some way, insulting them back and continuing your anger only transfers their problem to you. This person was probably having a bad day (or a bad year) and took it out on you for some reason. If you reciprocate, you are now having a bad day too. His problem has become yours. Not only that, but the cycle of insults can get worse and worse until it results in violence or other negative consequences for both of you.

Solution: Let the insults or negative comments of others slide off you like Teflon. Don't let their problem become yours. In fact, try to understand their problem more why would someone say something like that? What problems are they going through? Having a little empathy for someone not only makes you understand that their comment is not about you, but it can make you feel and act in a positive manner towards them and make you feel better about yourself in the process.

10. I don't think I can do this I don't have enough discipline. Maybe some other time.

Problem: If you don't think you can do something, you probably won't. Especially for the big stuff. Discipline has nothing to do with it motivation and focus has everything to do with it. If you put stuff off for "some other time", you'll never get it done. Negative thinking like this inhibits us from accomplishing anything.

Solution: Turn your thinking around: you can do this! You don't need discipline. Find ways to make yourself a success at your goal. If you fail, learn from your mistakes, and try again. Instead of putting a goal off for later, start now. Focus on one goal at a time, putting all of your energy into it, and getting as much help from others as you can.

He certainly isn’t the sort whom most folks would define as even remotely ‘successful’. After all, he isn’t rich and famous and doesn’t have a ‘glamorous’ job. But, as far as I am concerned, Ramesh, whom I met on a recent trip to Kerala, is definitely among the most amazingly successful people I’ve ever come across.

Ramesh is an assistant at a centre for mentally retarded people, and that’s where I met him. He’s 38, and has studied till the 8th grade. He earns a modest salary—six thousand rupees a month—with which he maintains his family. His work—which he’s been doing for the last eleven years—is heavy and extremely demanding. It’s a 24-hour job, seven days a week, with just two days off every month, when he can visit his wife and child, who live in another town. Ramesh’s job at the centre is to take care of an entire family—of six severely mentally retarded men—and that’s about as taxing and challenging a job as one can imagine.

Ramesh’s day begins at 5 in the morning, which is when some of the members of his ‘family’ are already awake and need to relieve themselves. Almost none of them can do that on their own, and so it’s Ramesh who has to clean them—with his bare hands—after they’ve been to the toilet. Then, he has to brush their teeth, give them a bath and change their clothes. After that, he makes tea for them, sweeps and mops their rooms, prepares and serves them breakfast, and helps the men get ready for their day’s work at the workshop. Being severely disabled, mentally as well as physically, the men cannot really do much work there, but being in the workshop for much of the day keeps them occupied. When they are away, Ramesh cleans the cow-shed, milks the cows and works in the vegetable garden. In the evenings, he comes back to the home, changes the men’s clothes, prepares and serves dinner and then gets them ready to sleep. By 10 o’clock the men are in their beds, and that’s when Ramesh can retire but he doesn’t get uninterrupted sleep because, inevitably, one or more of the men gets up during the night and demands attention. Weekends are even more hectic for Ramesh, because then the men are at home all day and need almost constant care.

I spent two days with Ramesh and his ‘family’, and, honestly, I don’t think I could have stayed much longer. I simply don’t have any of Ramesh’s grit, determination and compassion, which have kept him on in his job for the last eleven years. Those two days I was with him were enough to shatter the delusions I harboured about myself as supposedly being a seriously committed social activist. I don’t think I, or most other folks for that matter (including those generally projected as ‘amazingly successful achievers’), could have managed even a week doing what he does—taking care of six men most of whom cannot speak a word; who live in a house that smells of shit and urine; who need to be washed by someone else after they’ve been to the loo; who urinate and excrete in their clothes and need to be cleaned every time they do so; who sometimes beat and bite and holler at the person who helps them; who dribble and drool and make a terrible mess when they eat, and some of whom are so unaware of themselves that they sometimes even eat their own excrement.

But that’s what Ramesh has been doing for more than a decade, and I didn’t hear even a whimper of a complaint from him about the men he’s adopted as his family. Yes, he did say he wished he had someone to assist him and a few more days off every month, but—and you have to believe me—he had only wonderful things to say about the men he lived with and so lovingly served. ‘They are God’s children, so innocent and trusting and loving, like little, helpless babies,’ he said to me. ‘I see God in them, and, over the years, I’ve come to love them dearly.’

I could see that love in every action of Ramesh’s—whether he was singing a song for the men in the evenings, hugging them and taking them on piggy-back rides, repairing their clothes, washing a lump of excrement that someone had deposited on the drawing room floor, taking one of them by the hand to the nearby clinic, clearing shit stains from the walls or scrubbing the toilets. I’d never ever seen such compassion in action before, such spontaneous concern and care without any expectation of reward.

Meeting Ramesh, I now know that I’m really not even remotely as altruistic as I once fancied I was. And I know, too, that if I now have to make a short list of the most amazingly successful people I’ve met so far, Ramesh would certainly be near about the top.

What Warren Buffet says about basic investing, spending, savings are so true. Most of us know it, however too many of us do not live it.

If it does make a change in your life, thank HIM (I mean God) because this is common sense.

1. On Earning:

Do not depend on a single income. Invest and create a second/ third source of income:

This means when you are young your first task should be saving and investing. By creating a second source of income you are quickly reducing your dependence on your job. This could help you to set out on your own one day. The quicker you can do it, the better.

2. On Spending:

If you buy things that you do not need, you may soon have to sell things you need:

It kind of summarizes Gen X’s reaction towards ‘luxuries’. As a part of Gen X we were perhaps criticised for some of our expenses, so it could be a generational thing even for WB. However, having goals and knowing where you are going, and not spending just to ‘show off’ are important lessons for all generations.

3. On Savings:

Do not spend what is left after spending, instead spend after you save/invest:

Also called ‘Pay Yourself First’. If you realise that investing in a pension plan or for your kid’s education is just helping you to save more later on. It is not a sacrifice, it is just postponing consumption. So understand, invest and then spend.

4. On taking Risk:

Never test the depth of the river with both your feet:

If you are doing something, do small. If you are a first gen investor, do not be carried away by equity lovers like me and put all your money in equity. Do a SIP with a small amount, and test the waters. Do a SIP of Rs. X (which could be 10% of your take home pay) for 5 years and then step up. And for heavens sake understand risk of inflation, and the concept of real returns

5. On Investing:

Do not put all eggs in one basket:

Immaterial of who you are and how much you understand, create a portfolio. A full range lunch plate is always better than just one item. So create a portfolio with bonds, bond funds, PPF, NSC, equity, mutual funds, and on the risk side medical and term insurance.

6. On Expectation:

Honesty is expensive, do not expect it from cheap people:

Not everybody is honest, nor does everybody want to be honest. Honest advisers are difficult to find especially in Health and Wealth, be careful.

A young man was getting ready to graduate College. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him.

He handed his son a beautiful wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Holy script. Angrily, he raised his voice at his father and said, “With all your money you give me a holy script?” and stormed out of the house, leaving the holy book.

He never contacted his father again for a long time.

Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and a wonderful family, but realized his father was very old and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day.

Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his
possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.

When he arrived at his father’s house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search his father’s important papers and saw the still new Holy script, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Holy script and began to turn the pages. As he read those words, a car key dropped from an envelope taped behind the Holy script. It had a tag with the dealer’s name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.

How many times do we miss GOD’S blessings because they are not packaged as we expected?

ghulam muhammed wrote:His name was Fleming, and he was a poor Scottish farmer. One day, while trying to make a living for his family, he heard a cry for help coming from a nearby bog. He dropped his tools and ran to the bog.

There, mired to his waist in black muck, was a terrified boy, screaming and struggling to free himself. Farmer Fleming saved the lad from what could have been a slow and terrifying death.

The next day, a fancy carriage pulled up to the Scotsman's sparse surroundings. An elegantly dressed nobleman stepped out and introduced himself as the father of the boy Farmer Fleming had saved.

'I want to repay you,' said the nobleman. 'You saved my son's life.'
'No, I can't accept payment for what I did,' the Scottish farmer replied waving off the offer. At that moment, the farmer's own son came to the door of the family hovel.

'Is that your son?' the nobleman asked.

'Yes,' the farmer replied proudly..

'I'll make you a deal. Let me provide him with the level of education my own son will enjoy If the lad is anything like his father, he'll no doubt grow to be a man we both will be proud of.' And that he did.

Farmer Flemming's son attended the very best schools and in time, graduated from St. Mary's Hospital Medical School in London, and went on to become known throughout the world as the noted Sir Alexander Fleming, the discoverer of Penicillin.

Years afterward, the same nobleman's son who was saved from the bog was stricken with pneumonia.
What saved his life this time? Penicillin.

The Officer At The Driving License Counter Asked The Lady
" What is Your Occupation ? "

The Woman Seeking Renewal Of Her License Seemed To Be Puzzled.
So The Officer Said
" Ma'am, Are You Employed, Have Your Own Business Or........

The Woman Replied
" Oh, Yes !! I Have A Full Time Occupation. I Am A Mother "

Officer : " We Don't Have ' Mother ' As An Option For Occupation.
I Will Write it Down As ' Housewife '. That Takes Care Of All Questions."

This Had Happened Long Ago,
And Was Forgotten.Years Later When I Went To Get My License,The Public Relations Officer Was A Somewhat Pompous. Woman.

" Your Occupation ? "
She Asked in A Rather Authoritative Tone.

I Just Had An inspiration And Replied
" I Am A Researcher in The Field Of Child Development, Nutrition And Inter-Personal Relationships "

The Lady Officer Stared At Me in Amazement.
I Calmly Repeated My Statement And She Wrote it Down Verbatim.
Then, Unable To Conceal Her Curiosity,
She Politely Asked
" What Exactly Do You Do in Your Profession, Ma'am ? "

I Was Feeling Good About Having Described My Occupation So Calmly And Confidently.
So I Replied
" My Research Projects Have Been Going On For A Number Of Years
( Mothers Never Retire !! ).

My Research is Conducted in The Laboratory As Well As in The Field.
I Have Two Bosses.
*(One is God and the other is my entire family)*. I Have Received Two Honours in This Field.
*(A son and a daughter)*
My Topic is Considered To Be The Most Difficult Part Of Sociology.
*( All Moms will Agree!! )*.
I Have To Work More Than 14 Hours Every Day.
Sometimes Even 24 Hours Are Not Enough And The Challenges Are Tougher Than Many Other Professions.
My Compensation is in Terms Of Mental Satisfaction Rather Than Money "

I Could See That The Officer Was Thoroughly impressed. After Completing The Licensing Formalities, She Came To The Door To See Me Off.

This New Viewpoint About My Occupation Made Me Feel Much Better On My Way Back Home.

I Was Welcomed By My 5 Year Old Research Assistant At The Door.
My New Project *(My 6 Month old Baby)* Was Energetically Practicing Her '
Music '.

I Had Earned A Small Victory Over The Governmental Red Tape Today.
I Was No Longer ' Merely A Mother ', instead I Was Now A Highly Placed Functionary in A Service Vital For Mankind -Motherhood !!

*' Mother '* - Isn't it A Great Title.
Fit To Be Added To The Nameplate On The Door !!

All Ladies Currently Holding Posts Like Didi - Tai - Chachi - Mami - Mausi - Bua ......mama They Will All Shower You With Blessings And Life Will Be Happier.

“We extend a very warm thank you to each of our special wedding guests for joining us and showering us with your blessings as we start our life together. We believe that we have been extremely fortunate and would like to share this joyous occasion with the children of Baale Mane, a loving home for girls in Bangalore, who have overcome extreme deprivation to survive, thrive and aspire,” reads the message displayed on a wedding invitation card of a couple in Bangalore.

Taking a step away from tradition, the new-age couples are increasingly looking for alternative wedding gifts in the form of charity. Be it funds for an NGO or an organisation supporting a cause, today’s young couples are ready to walk that extra mile, in order to bring in a difference in less fortunate people’s lives.

“My partner was very eager to give something back to the society. What better way than doing this on the most important day of our life? We decided to get our relatives and friends involved as well. Hence, my wife suggested that we add a little message on our wedding card. Despite this, there were many who brought gifts,” said Kunal Khemka, who got married in November. Kunal and his wife donated the amount they received to a home for the elderly. “Though to us a sum of Rs37,000 may not sound much, it went a long way to bring smiles on the faces of the inhabitants,” said a visibly pleased Shradha Khemka.

Like Kunal, there are many who believe that there is no greater pleasure than giving. “In return we get blessings from unknown and less privileged people on our special day. Such things are priceless,” said Rishaad and Aruna, who are keen to follow the good example set by friends, the Khemkas, when they get hitched early next year.

Mary C, managing trustee, The Baale Mane Trust, said she was extremely touched by the gesture of the couple who donated over Rs2 lakh last year. “Though this trend is still in the nascent stages, it is picking up. Happiness is reflected on the faces of these little girls,”she said. The money that the couple donated helped provide the girls nutritious food, clothing and education.

Many feel it will be a while before such cases become more and more frequent as Indians traditionally are of the mindset of gifting a token on the wedding day. But, like in the western countries where it is already popular, the day is not far when it gains momentum in India too.

I was jogging one day and I noticed a person In front of me, about 1/4 of mile. I could tell he was running a little slower than me and I thought, good, I shall try to catch him. I had about a mile to go my path before I needed to turn off. So I started running faster and faster. Every block, I was gaining on him just a little bit. After just a few minutes I was only about 100 yards behind him, so I really picked up the pace and pushed myself. You would have thought I was running In the last leg of London Olympic competition. I was determined to catch him. Finally, I did It! I caught and passed him by. On the Inside I felt so good "I beat him" of course, he didn't even know we were racing.

After I passed him, I realized I had been so focused on competing against him that I had missed my turn. I had gone nearly six blocks past It.

I had to turn around and go all back. Isn't that what happens in life when we focus on competing with co-workers, neighbours, friends, family, trying to outdo them or trying to prove that we are more successful or more Important?

We spend our time and energy running after them and we miss out on our own paths to our God given destinies. The problem with unhealthy competition is that it's a never ending cycle.

There will always be somebody ahead of you, someone with better job, nicer car, more money in the bank, more education, a prettier wife, a more handsome husband, better behaved children, etc. But realize that "You can be the best that you can be, you are not competing with no one

*The Moral:-
Take what God has given you, the height, weight, personality. Dress well wear it proudly! You all be blessed by it. Stay focused and live a healthy life.

*There's no competition In DESTINY, run your own RACE and wish others.

The teacher told each child in the class to bring along a plastic bag containing a few potatoes. Each potato will be given a name of a person that the child hates.

So the number of potatoes that a child will put in his/her plastic bag will depend on the number of people he/she hates.

So when the day came, every child brought some potatoes with the name of the people he/she hated. Some had 2 potatoes; some 3 while some up to 5 potatoes.

The teacher then told the children to carry with them the potatoes in the plastic bag wherever they go (even to the toilet) for 1 week.

Days after days passed by, and the children started to complain due to the unpleasant smell let out by the rotten potatoes.

Besides, those having 5 potatoes also had to carry heavier bags. After 1 week, the children were relieved because the game had finally ended....

The teacher asked: "How did you feel while carrying the potatoes with you for 1 week?". The children let out their frustrations and started complaining of the trouble that they had to go through having to carry the heavy and smelly potatoes wherever they go.

Then the teacher told them the hidden meaning behind the game. The teacher said: "This is exactly the situation when you carry your hatred for somebody inside your heart.

The stench of hatred will contaminate your heart and you will carry it with you wherever you go.

If you cannot tolerate the smell of rotten potatoes for just 1 week, can you imagine what is it like to have the stench of hatred in your heart for your lifetime???"

Moral of the story:Throw away any hatred for anyone from your heart so that you will not carry sins for a lifetime. Forgiving others is the best attitude to take!

True love is not loving a perfect person but loving an imperfect person perfectly!!

Fantastic example to concentrate and just focuses on one positive subject with faith.

Stochastic Probability Theory - Pregnant Deer Scenario

Consider this scenario: In a remote forest, a pregnant deer is about to give birth to a baby.

It finds a remote grass field near by a river and slowly goes there thinking it would be safe.
As she moves slowly, she gets labor pain. at the same moment, dark clouds gather around that area and lightning starts a forest fire.

Turning left she sees a hunter who is aiming an arrow from a distance.

As she tries to move towards right, she spots a hungry lion approaching towards her.

Stochastic Probability Theory - Pregnant Deer Scenario:

What can the pregnant deer do .as she is already under labor pain ?

What do you think will happen?

Will the deer survive?

Will it give birth to a fawn?

Will the fawn survive?

OR

Will everything be burnt by the forest fire ?

That particular moment ?

Can the deer go left ? Hunters arrow is pointing

Can she go right ? Hungry male lion approaching

Can she move up ? Forest fire

Can she move down ? Fierce river

Answer: She does nothing. She just focuses on giving birth to a new LIFE.

The sequence of events that happens at that fraction of a second (moment) are as follows:

In a spur of MOMENT a lightning strikes (already it is cloudy ) and blinds the eyes of the Hunter. At that MOMENT, he releases the arrow missing and zipping past the deer. At that MOMENT the arrow hits and injures the lion badly. At that MOMENT, it starts to rain heavily and puts out the forest fire. At that next MOMENT, the deer gives birth to a healthy fawn.

In our life, its our MOMENT of CHOICE and we all have to deal with such negative thoughts from all sides always. Some thoughts are so powerful they overpower us and makes us clueless. Let us not decide anything in a hurry. Lets think of ourselves as the pregnant deer with the ultimate happy ending.

Anything can happen in a MOMENT in this life. If you are religious, superstitious, atheist, agnostic or whatever you can attribute this MOMENT as divine intervention, faith, sudden luck, chance (serendipity), coincidence or a simple dont know'.

We all feel the same.

But, whatever one may call it, I would see the priority of the deer in that given moment was to giving birth to a baby. because LIFE IS PRECIOUS.

Hence, whether you are deer or a human, keep that faith and hope within...

This scene took place on a British Airways flight between Johannesburg, South Africa & London.

A white woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a black man.

Very disturbed by this, she called the air hostess. "You obviously do not see it then?" she asked. "You placed me next to a black man. I did not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat."

"Be calm please," the hostess replied.

"Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another place is available."

The hostess went away & then came back a few minutes later.

"Madam, just as I thought, there are no other available seats in Economy Class.

I spoke to the captain & he informed me that there is also no seat in Business Class. All the same, we still have one place in First Class."

Before the woman could say anything, the hostess continued.

"It is not usual for our company to permit someone from Economy Class to sit in First Class. However, given the circumstances, the captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting."

The Hostess turned to the black guy, & said, "Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in First Class."

At that moment, the other passengers, who'd been shocked by what they had just witnessed, stood up & applauded.

This is a true story. If you are against racism, please send this to all your friends.

When I was a kid, Mum liked to make food for dinner & I remember one night in particular when she had made dinner after a long, hard day at work. On that evening Mum placed a plate of bread jam and extremely burned biscuits in front of my dad.

I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his biscuit, smile at my Mum and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember hearing my Mum apologize to my dad for burning the biscuits. And I'll never forget what he said: "Honey, I love burned biscuits."

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his biscuits burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, "Your momma put in a long hard day at work today and she's real tired. And besides... A burnt biscuit never hurt anyone but harsh words do!" You know, life is full of imperfect things... And imperfect people. I'm not the best. What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each others faults and choosing to celebrate each other’s differences, is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing and lasting relationship. So...please pass me a biscuit. And yes, the burnt one will do just fine.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets... Love the people who treat you right and have compassion for the ones who don't.

Pencil: I'm sorry cos you get hurt bcos of me. Whenever I made a mistake, you're always there to erase it. But as you make my mistakes vanish, you lose a part of yourself. You get smaller and smaller each time.

Eraser: That's true. But I don't really mind. You see, I was made to do this. I was made to help you whenever you do something wrong. Even though one day, I know I'll be gone and you'll replace me with a new one, I'm actually happy with my job. So please, stop worrying. I hate seeing you sad.

I found this conversation between the pencil and the eraser very inspirational. Parents are like the eraser whereas their children are the pencil. They're always there for their children, cleaning up their mistakes. Sometimes along the way... they get hurt, and become smaller (older, and eventually pass on). Though their children will eventually find someone new (spouse), but parents are still happy with what they do for their children, and will always hate seeing their precious ones worrying, or sad.

Our five senses are windows, which open out to the world through which energy flows in two directions. The senses receive impressions and information from the world, and at the same time transmit our personalities to others. Our eyes receive a constant stream of visual messages, but we may also use the eyes to show how we feel. Through our ears we hear the sounds of life; while by "lending an ear" to others we give comfort to them. Touch allows us to experience texture; but can also transmit love and assurance. Our senses are not merely instruments, but deep-rooted aspects of the self or the soul.

In India, the senses of the body (eyes, ears, nose, tongue and hands) are beautifully depicted in the form of a chariot. The self or the soul is the charioteer (controller of the chariot); the five senses are the five horses. The self keeps the senses harmoniously (peacefully) working together, controlling their tendency to go out of control.

Inner stability requires a degree of internal fortitude. We can begin to develop this fortitude by recognizing and appreciating our own unique set of GOD gifted resources, strengths, values, and abilities. We need to spend some time figuring out who we are as a person and learn to connect with that person.

Sadly, most of us have lost touch with our creative self. We have allowed the roles we play to define who we are as a person when it should be the other way around. From this perspective the winds of change can easily throw us off balance and disturb our own life.

Most people choose a life course that is based on external criteria. They end up following a path that leads away from the expression of their true self. Consequently, with each step they actually distance themselves from the life they truly looking for.

To accomplish this requires that you actually know who you really are and what you really want. Once you are in touch with your true self, the changes around you become much less influential. Instead of your identity being anchored to external forces, it remains safe and secure no matter which way the winds of change decide to blow.