Ryan Houston
Previously found on radio and writing in magazines, now moved to a new chapter!

THE BLOG

When Dating Apps Become a Problem... Are We Addicted?

05/12/2014 15:22 GMT
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Updated
03/02/2015 10:59 GMT

I recently discussed someone that I went on a date with, who halfway through our date went on his dating profile during a conversation we were having. I wasn't happy in the slightest. I didn't find it a good trait in a future partner that he couldn't pay attention to what I was saying for more than half an hour before needing to chat with other men online.

In the past, I've been a big fan. It's pretty difficult to meet people these days, and anything that makes that process easier surely can't be a bad thing, can it?

Now I may have been a fan, but I know they have a place - on a night-out, in a long meeting? Yes, give them a click and have a browse but change the setting and maybe it isn't the right time - In a church on a Sunday morning, in front of your date, or partner? Probably not the right time, strange situation but true - I've seen it many times.

When people have been asked why they use these apps, the most popular answer as for one-to-one sex - A positive message when you're looking for love - the second most popular answer was out of boredom - Both use of apps are confusing if you're already in a relationship and apparently 'happy' , which draws me to the question, Are we addicted to dating apps?

When asked about the frequency at which people used apps, 74% of people admitted to using them at least once a day with almost half of this figure admitting to using apps frequently throughout the day.

But given the choice of remaining on your app and ruining your relationship or deleting your profile - Is this a more difficult decision that first meets the eye?

I've heard many of my friends declare they're deleting their profile, only to return a few days later - Including myself, and a few ex-boyfriends! It isn't a physical addiction but many gay men have experience of apps such as Grindr as an addiction.

Just like drugs and alcohol, apps can have dangerous effects on your life, who's really in control? If you lie to your partner about deleting your profile, if it interferes with your work, or if you can't stop making regular online visits, maybe it is time to admit you have a problem.

And perhaps, if you still need a profile when you're in a relationship, you aren't as happy with that person after all?