Following up on a whole host of D-List celebrities (among them the abominable K-Fed), Ellen DeGeneres most recently had Tommy Lee on her show. Tommy admitted that he found about Pam Anderson wedding by text message.

Well that’s because you’re a loser Tommy. You always were, and now that you are losing your dashing looks everyone can see it that much clearer.

But in Tommy Lee’s defense, one must say that the wedding was a bit of a surprise to most people who knew Pamela. Even Howard Stern, who purports to be good friends with her (probably having had dipped his beak in that honey pot, though he denies that rumour completely), found out on the eve of the wedding to Kid Rock.

So to sum up: Tommy Lee is a loser. Ellen DeGeneres has a crappy show that only attracts D-Listers, and the only reason it is still around is because some coked-up TV exec believed in his own hype and his licking his bosses’ Warner Bros. butt to keep the show on life support. And Pam Anderson and Kid Rock are probably doing magic mushrooms or something — that wedding was a surprise to even them probably when they were coming down. And I’m pretty sure that Howard Stern had sex with Pamela Anderson.