Today we have a funeral to attend, so I will take this opportunity to wish everyone a very Happy New Year and to thank you all for being a wonderful part of my life. I'll leave it at that, before I get all sobby and wet the keyboard and stuff. I love you guys.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Looky! My mittens have found a new home in Moscow. Isn't it the coolest thing? Note to self: Do not send anything perishable to Kristen. It took over two months for this package to get there, through the "expedited" service to which she subscribes. yeebers. I, of course, was convinced that some corrupt person had stolen them for his wifeniece mistress and I would maybe have to hire Val Kilmer to go over to Russia and, in great acts of derring-do, get them from the Tretiaks......oh, never mind. It's too embarrassing to reveal my fantasies. But Kristen has been given access to the Tretiakov for her research (a Very Big Deal), so.... you know, Tretiakov, Tretiak, Val Kilmer. Maybe my favorite movie of ALL TIME. You see where I'm going here, right? Right? No?

*AHEM*

Ummmmmm, I finished the first man-mitten. But of course, I don't really mean "finished," now, do I? Because now comes the tricky part. I have to get that cuff off of there and knit it down with Lamb's Pride, so as to save the wool for the next mitten. Because it is official: I do not have enough of my handspun Coopworth for another one of these. *sob*

And yes, I'm frightened of the whole cutting thing. I picked up the scissors several times yesterday, ready to make a snip, but I chickened out and took a nap instead. The nap was not successful in the least. Everything in my body ached, and I kept snapping awake, thinking: "I'm forgetting something! What am I forgetting? Where am I supposed to be? What day is this?" -- that sort of thing. Obviously something going on in that thing called Norma's.....um....brain? It was a kooky day. I wasn't feeling the greatest. I had had a Series of Unfortunate Incidents the day before (nothing serious, just small annoyances and disappointments), I needed a chiropractic visit (which I had last night), and my deposition had canceled at the very last minute. Literally, the phone rang as I was going out the door and I almost didn't answer it. I did, though, and it was the manager at the law office I was supposed to go to, giving me the bad news. When that happens, it just really screws up my whole day. Fish out of water. All dressed up and nowhere to go. Schedule shot to hell. That sort of thing.

In a supreme act of avoidance of The Mitten-Cutting Issue, I started this:Holy crap, that Fleece Artist is just about as pleasurable a thing to knit with as I could imagine. The colors, which are not accurate in that photo -- they are more muted and autumnal and warm and glorious, like sun on my face and sunflowers, with a small sprig of lavender here and there, and wine and chocolate and..... well, they woke up my brain. With wild gleeeeeeee! I wear the socksCari made for me all.the.time, (well, when I'm not wearing the ones Cassie made me. Yes, I am a lucky, lucky girl) so I'm attempting to make a copy of The Cari Pair with this fabulous yarn from my Better Pal. This will give a chance for me to wash the other ones once in a while, and also, maybe extend their lives. I'm using Ann Budd's Book of Patterns for guidance, getting 7 stitches to the inch on 2.5 mm needles, and, well, fingers crossed that they'll fit.

Because now I'm in a race with myself. I recently discovered, to my utter astonishment, that I have completed 51 items in 51 weeks this year. (check my gallery!) Granted, many of them are small, super-simple things. But I need to finish one more thing (and unfortunately in knitting rules, "a pair" is "a thing," right?) to make it A Perfect Year.

The background: I did the so-called Snow Queen Set (hat, scarf, mittens) for Abigail last winter. She has worn it non-stop ever since (not in the summer, of course, duh!) and loves it. She says she feels unique in it, and she has learned that she is known around campus as "the girl with the sparkly hat," and she likes this distinction. When I told her this fall that I wanted to make her something for Christmas, she asked if I would please make her another hat just like the first one.The first one was starting to look worn. When I informed her that Berroco Furz had been discontinued and that there was no more white, but I had some other colors - would she mind taking a black hat, or a red or dark purple one - or did she want me to conduct a full-out, all-points-bulletin, search for white, she said, "Yeah, white." Long-time readers will probably remember my plea, which was answered in short order by Isela, and within a couple of days, I had white Furz in my hands.

Upon further inquiry, Abigail had a modification she would like me to make to the hat. She wanted the top to be a little flatter. I showed her various patterns, and the other day she chose the simple garter-stitch hat pattern we found in Homespun Handknit. I was very happy with this option, as the scarf I did for her is done in garter stitch, and she loves that scarf -- no other scarf on this planet compares. I've even offered her one of my cashmere (store-bought) scarves, and although she loves the cashmere one, she said, "My scarf is nicer." (way to melt a mother's knitter's heart) So the garter hat really coordinates with the garter scarf better than the other hat did. Also, this one has a nice substantial turn-up brim, which I agree with her is more flattering than the little rolled brim.

Now we need to visit grandma and her sewing machine to put a microfleece lining in it like the other hat has. The sequins on the inside, which are unavoidable, as they are strung on a thread that is knit along with the yarn (that's the Lazer FX), poke into one's head.

Monday, December 26, 2005

Lately some wonderful little elves have been busy making my holiday more festive. I feel at a loss for words, and you know that really means something big. (Me? At a loss for words?)

From Dear Reader and "commenter extraordinaire," as Stephanie calls her, Rachel H, I received the following bowl-me-over-generous gifts:

Two antique child-size wooden sock stretchers (which I mentioned in a blog entry once that I had been searching for for a long time, even before I started knitting, and had not been able to find around here), and two humongo skeins of hemp and wool sock yarn. As you can see, one (sunflower is the color -- how sweet is that?) is already rolled up into a ball. I have so many conflicting yarns calling out for my attention to cast.on.NOW! I am tempted to make this yarn into a lace shawl rather than socks. I'm still debating that question.

I have wanted to try knitting with a hemp/wool blend forever, and now I will have the chance. The sock stretchers are now a permanent part of my decor, as well as being useful. My husband greatly approves!

Rachel, you are a light in my sky, so very thoughtful and such an uplifting presence on the internet. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Yes, by hook or by crook, you must attend a festival in the next year! Also, I will work on getting to Toronto.

Next on my doorstep arrived this box:

S. Kate, another Dear Reader Extraordinaire, used some very clever padding (ahem, some more of the same gorgeous roving I got and was raving about recently from Ronnie's Handspun) for a box of her killer homemade biscotti. It was all tied up with her handspun alpaca with beads. (I'm only guessing on the alpaca, but it looks like it to me) and included this adorable handmade card (see his spindle?) and a cleverly wrapped (in some more roving) box of red food coloring. Apparently the roving wants to be red. Of course, I will be only too happy to oblige.

Thank you, S.Kate. You are so talented and thoughtful and sweet!

People are just so kind and generous, and I am so privileged to have met, virtually and in real life, so many positive souls through this blogging thing. I brought the biscotti to our family Christmas get-together yesterday and reminded my sister of the package of chocolates that S. Kate ordered and I just happened to pack, and told her the story and shared the biscotti. Warm smiles were shared by all. Such an amazing world this has turned out to be.

I have been a busy little bee.

My daughter chose a pattern for her replacement Snow Queen hat. It will be a fraternal, not an identical, twin. And this time it's being made out of my own handspun, carried along with the Furz that Isela helped me find and the Lazer FX. And oh, how I love it. It's a simple garter-stitch hat from Homespun Handknit, and since she adores her scarf in that set, and it's done in garter, this makes it even better. I will be making one of these for me, too, since it is an anti-pinhead type of style.

My mom acted as my swift at the get-together yesterday as I rolled the handspun into a ball, and I cast on and knitted almost the entire hat at the party. The only thing that stopped me from completing it is I ran out of the sparkly crap. (aka Lazer FX) So it's on hold 'til I can get down to Kaleidoscope to get some. Please let them have it in stock in white/silver! I'm tres excited to be using the handspun that I made a few weeks ago. I was all set to cast it on using Cascade 220 when I got the brainstorm, and it couldn't be more perfect and more magical.

I started the gift mittens before I started the hat. I got about halfway through the first mitten when it started to look like I would not have enough yarn to complete two man-sized mittens from the handspun Coopworth roving that was a gift from Carole*. This is a prime example of my poor ability to estimate how far yardage of my handspun will go. When I was spinning this, I planned on making TWO PAIRS - his and hers - of thrummed mittens from this yarn. I was positive I had enough for two.

No way. I now believe I will have to cut the cuff off this one and replace it with something, and then I might have enough for both mittens. I searched through my teeny stash of handspun and found absolutely nothing appropriate. The Jacob handspun I have would be appropriate colorwise, but the gauge is way off. After much searching and wondering WTF I was going to do, I dug deep in one of my bins and found several skeins of Lamb's Pride Worsted that look just right. And I decided on a muted neutral color that will complement the madder-dyed Coopworth and will be the right gauge. Have I mentioned I have never cut my knitting and knitted down from the live stitches before? But I think I'm up for the challenge and it will give me practice in a new skill.

But once I had to stop the hat, I continued on with the mitten, and I'm now at the point of starting the decreases of the first one. I'm using the stunningly luscious Polworth fleece (see the locks of it there in the photo?) received as another gift from Kim** as the thrums. Once again, I'm doing tone-on-tone thrums, and the color of the Polworth matches the color of the madder-dyed Coop almost perfectly, but it is much, MUCH softer. I'm knitting on with confidence that the reclaimed yarn from the cuff will give me enough to finish the hand of the 2nd mitt. And for the 2nd mitten, I will just go ahead and start with the contrast cuff made of the LP Worsted.

Saturday, December 24, 2005

Well, not that I wasn't going to have a very nice holiday anyway, but now, here is the icing on the cake. I received my package from my Better Pal today, on Christmas Eve and Hanukkah Eve, and oh, yes, it is as sweet as sugar plums and latkes - not that latkes are sweet, but the applesauce on top is.

Can you believe the colors of that yarn??? Oh, just so beautiful. Reminds me of wine and chocolate in the sunset. I sure am glad Sandy's not nearby. She'd probably try to steal it from me. But Sandy, it's MINE, ALL MINE! Paws off.

Anyway, back to the scrumptious sock yarn, it is 100% merino, and it is so, so soft and wonderful. On the BP questionnaire is a question: What is one yarn or fiber you've never tried, but are dying to, and Fleece Artist is what I wrote. So now, thanks to my lovely Better Pal, my life is complete. Except I have not yet knit with it, so I'm not quite ready to push up roses. I'm using all my strength to resist casting on immediately, since I'm working on some gift mittens that need to get done.

And then there's a package of some really delicious-looking chocolates. Dark and rich. Can't wait to break into those. I'm sure I won't wait too long.

And my camera - I just don't "get" my camera sometimes. It did a really wonderful job of capturing the colors of the yarn, but a lousy one of capturing the colors and the cuteness of the stitch markers in the package. They're green and red, and just adorable. I'm going to get lots of use out of those.

Friday, December 23, 2005

This is my first project in my own handspun yarn. (well, I don't count the three rows of spindle-spun singles I used on the cuffs of the spicy thrummed mittens I did earlier this year or late last year...)

Some notes: The yarn was pretty darned ok. It got better as I went along in the spinning, and therefore in the knitting. However, it all knitted up at a pretty even gauge and looks nice and even in terms of texture. There are a few places where it tightens up or makes a little indentation line because that row or two was a thinner or thicker yarn, but overall I think it's pretty good and balanced, for a first project. I realized for the first time as I was taking the picture of the inside of the mittens that the second mitten's thrums are, shall we say, less generous. I didn't realize as I was knitting them that I was making the thrums any differently than the first, so it's possible that they might fluff out more with wear, since the first one has been put on and off my hand several times already, and the second one has not. I cannot discern a difference when they're on my hands.

Thursday, December 22, 2005

I love it, as usual. (and look, the snowman has a scarf on the hanger. And this is a knitting blog, after all...awww)

But Honey: We've only been half a globe apart for eleven years, and I've only asked you for your new address about seventy-eleven times, and you insist on sending me cards with NO RETURN ADDRESS.

Don't worry -- This Christmas Eve I will not show up on your doorstep at 4 a.m. after having spent the night at Hammersmith Hospital being saved from Death by Allergic Reaction to Aspirin, and I won't make you leave your bed and make it up for me with fresh sheets (although I did not ask for this - you did it on your own) and wear your pyjamas and borrow your jeans (which I still have in my closet, by the way, and still wear for my gardening - I kid you not) and have you make coffee for me and walk me around the block in the morning in the brisk air to make me wake up, and share a cab across London to my flat in West Acton on your way to Heathrow in order to catch a flight out (for which you were probably late) to Switzerland.

Not that that ever happened exactly like that or anything.

But if it had, I promise it won't happen exactly like that, ever again.

Stop being a slacker and send me the damn address! Even though the Royal Mails are pretty damn good, I don't think it would make it to you if I addressed it, "Andrew H******, Somewhere in Scotland."

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

I really don't have much. Except the latest hypochondriac's report: The headache has left the building.

And that, right there, is reason enough for rejoicing. I'll take the boring. This one was three frickin' days in duration. Not acceptable. Not a reason to get too upset, because it's just the damn hormones, I believe. That and the fact that I've been eating like shit. It's the wheat. And the potato chips. And it's not worth it.

Well, so of course I immediately started scouting for recipes for eggnog poundcake and other ways to torture myself. I've decided to just let myself go for the holiday season. Start afresh in the New Year. I think it'll be a really great incentive to GET STRAIGHT, if I have made myself miserable and very, very sick first. Sort of that whole idea of sticking a smoker in a room and force-feeding her cigarettes 'til she makes herself sick, as the ultimate incentive to quit smoking.

My pants are already straining at the waistband, and I.don't.care. I'm embracing my inner sloth for a few weeks. This is a rare behavior, and I'm blaming it all on the age and its attendant hormonal ravages. I can't explain it any other way. This health food fanatic of 20 years has become a b-i-g p-i-g. Bring out the stretch pants.

You're probably craving photos and knitting news. Well, there ain't much of that, I'll tell ya. I have been stealing a few minutes here and there to work on red thrummed mitten #2. I got that far, and you see that little wisp of red on the side? That was all the dyed red roving I had left. Clearly that wasn't going to cut it. So I had to dye some more. You purists, avert your eyes. I took some of the same roving, a very small bit. I put a tiny pot with some water and a huge glug of vinegar, no measuring. I took red and yellow liquid food coloring - not even the same dye I used before, which was a conglomeration, you may recall, of Kool-Aid, Wilton icing gel, and liquid food coloring. I splished and splashed. I stuck the roving in. I let it simmer. I waited. I drained it.

It came out like this: The little wisp on the far right is the original one. 100 percent perfect match. What if we'd really TRIED to match it? What would have happened then? Crazy. It's not yet fully dry as of this writing, so there is a holdup in the mitten-knitting.

And every now and then I have found a few minutes to spin. I ordered some most delicious roving from this eBay seller. I don't see that she has any more of the same thing listed, but it was a batch of roving described to be of mixed next-to-the-skin-soft wools, such as Merino, Targhee and Rambouillet. That stuff is to die for. Here is my first bobbin of it spun up. It spins like a damn smooth dream. Damn smooth. Like top milk, the really good stuff. Pure cream. Careful, or it'll turn into butter. I might try some of this as a secret ingredient in the eggnog poundcake. I bet it'll make it much richer.

Please, please intervene. Now is the time. If you're my friends. Save me from myself.

Don't be like these friends. They are just trying to lead me down the path to destruction. This one, for example, who sends me this:

What kind of a friend does this to another friend? Huh? A box of Polworth. My first unprepared, unwashed fleece. (swoon)

It's not a whole one, but it scared the living daylights right out of my husband, I'll tell you. We won't even mention Vincent's reaction. I pretended to have no idea who the person was who sent it to me. Sorry, Kim. I denied any knowledge of you and played the total innocent. Really, you're safer that way. (eep! kidding!)

And then this, on the same day: This one I knew was coming. It's Montadale locks, along with a pattern, from Anne. But it did not help with the spousal situation. Not one bit. Again I had to play dumb. At some point, though - very soon, I suspect - the dumb act is not going to work anymore. He didn't just fall off a turnip truck yesterday. Then what? Any ideas? Help me, here. Please!

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Well, I must give a disclaimer here that I don't know if this is actually a real drink (well, I mean physically, yes, it's real....perhaps I should consult my philosopher daughter on this question?), or if I've bastardized some other recipe, but this is what I make and call a Rum Toddy.

Add boiling water, and stir with a cinnamon stick. Sometimes I put a slice of orange in before I pour in the boiling water.

Let it steep for a few minutes, and sip. Very fragrant and warming and soothing and festive and reminds me of Charles Dickens. Therefore, one must wear fingerless mitts when drinking. Or not. But it's a cool knitter's touch, don't you think? Very nice with fruitcake or plum pudding - it sort of cuts the sweetness and the heaviness. Mmmmm.

Happy Holidays!

LATER: It's 3:50 a.m. I'm up. I'm headachey. I can't sleep. Let us review the amount of caffeine I consumed yesterday, in an effort to a) stay awake and b) get rid of my headache, shall we? Two 12-ounce cans of Diet Coke; two Excedrin tension headache tablets in the a.m.

Usually this works wonders.

Headache continued, exacerbated by an excruciatingly stressful work situation in which I am on a remote island sitting at the foot of an unplowed road that only has snowmobile tracks on it. This is the address I was given for the deposition, complete with a map, and there is spotty (at best) cell phone service. I.e., the phone shows three bars in the signal thingy, but the second I dial a number, it says, "call lost." I sit like this for over an hour, hoping someone (i.e., the ^&%$$^&*^* attorneys taking the deposition) will show up. Did I mention I had to PEEEEEEE so bad during this entire time? Did I mention this place is REMOTE? Did I mention I was *this close* to getting out and peeing on the side of the road and the only things that stopped me are that the land is FLAT and completely untreed and, oh, did I mention COLD? Oh, and the fact that, yes, not just one, but THREE attorneys might/should/I hope pleasegod, be driving up at any moment?

A full half hour AFTER the appointed deposition time (did I mention I arrived a full 40 minutes BEFORE the appointed deposition time?), a guy in a pickup truck pulls up behind me. I have no idea who he is. I wonder if he's just a local that someone has called about this suspicious person sitting in a red car by the side of the road for over an hour. He saunters up to my side window. Is he an ax-murderer? No, he's a guy who says, "Are you looking for Bob? Bob - (and then mispronounces the last name of the attorney for whom I'm supposed to be working)?"

"Yes! Yes, I AM!" (and I'm also looking for a toilet, PLEASE GOD.)

"You go down that road, over there. It's paved for a while, and then you just keep going."

Why did those words, "you just keep going," scare the living bejesus out of me????

So I say to him, "Oh, they told me blankety-blank Road!"

"Yes, this is where I was, too, until everyone showed up, and then I followed them."

"Oh, you're not going back there, so I can't follow you?"

"No, I'm all done my part."

Hello? All done his part??? of what? of the deposition? THEY STARTED THE DEPOSITIONS WITHOUT ME????

"Oh, okay, I can show you where it is."

I follow him. Yep. Paved. And then we JUST KEEP GOING. Over what appears to be plowed snow OVER GRASS. Then we come to a house, and he turns around his vehicle and he leaves. I hope this door, here, is the right place. SCORE! I even recognize some of the faces inside. AT least I think I do. All I could think of was PEEEEEEEE !!!! "Bathroom, PLEASE!!!!"

This is after I exclaim loudly, "Attorneys! You can't trust 'em for three minutes!"

To which my client of the day says, "Women. They can't follow directions!"

This was all good-natured, you understand. I could have been PISSED off. Instead all I could think about was PISSING on. And I did. Forever. In this little home, in a little bathroom off the kitchen, where everyone was sitting around the kitchen table. ASK ME IF I CARED!

So anyway: Typical scenario. Everyone was told but the court reporter that there was a problem with the road not having been plowed, and there was a different route to the house. (and the helpful guy - he had not been deposed, but they had done a view of the area where an incident had happened and he was one of the defendants in the case. They had been out tromping in the snow-covered field for a couple of hours before I got there, and so of course they had totally forgotten about me.)

The deposition itself was very pleasant, after my bladder pain decreased. But the headache had been made worse from all the stress.

Then after it was all over, I drive toward home, stopping for lunch at 2 p.m. I buy a 20-ounce Diet Pepsi Twist. This location is only a few miles from the chocolate factory.

I stop in to say hello. Ahem.

So......yeah....I work two hours at the chocolate factory, until I absolutely cannot carry on under the pain of the headache anymore.

I come home. I try a nap. I can't sleep. The pain is too severe. I take another dose of Excedrin Tension. (Oh, did I forget to mention? Excedrin Tension consists of acetaminophen and caffeine.) It only makes a feeble gesture at tackling the headache, but now I am Awake. And in pain. With another deposition at 10 a.m. today.