Brittany Arnold: Think before you speak

Brittany Arnold

Age: 26

Family: Husband, Chris; daughter, Audrey, 2; and a baby due in June.

Occupation: Stay-at-home mom and wife, writer and blogger

About: From fashion shows, concerts, Blackberries, little black dresses, fine dining and everything else the city life offers to packaging hunted elk meat, shooting guns, casserole dishes, endless laundry and an SUV, join her on this journey from city shaker to green acres.

Brittany is the wife of a logging administrator and mother of a toddler with another one coming in June. She dedicates herself to staying at home but also writes a monthly column, My ABC Soup, for The News-Review, is the publicity leader for Sutherlin's Mothers-of-Preschoolers and is active at her church and in the community. Her blog can be viewed at www.myabcsoup.wordpress.com.

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I got to do a fun thing this last week in the waiting room at the OBGYN’s office: I got to wait – a long time.

I am sure there are more of you like me out there. We try so hard not to pay attention to the ongoing conversations around us, but some are hard to ignore.

During this fabulous waiting period, as I attempted to work, a mother and currently pregnant woman proceeded to give a first-time pregnant woman advice.

As a woman, I know our species loves to talk, especially when we think we are giving helpful information.

But women, I encourage you, think before you speak and realize that your opinion and your personal story may not help but hinder.

As this experienced mother proceeded to talk about her scary births of all her children, how she can’t stand doctors, how the hospital did a list of things wrong – I watched this poor first-timer's face turn pale.

The experienced mother urged her to not do this at the hospital, not let the doctors do that and then even pulled out her phone and began showing her statistics.

Ladies, let’s keep our waiting room etiquette, please.

If we are big-girl enough to have a baby, we should be big-girl enough to do our own research, planning and discernment.

That isn’t to say women don’t need other women’s support and wisdom – we do! However, support and wisdom are much different than insisting your plan and your way should be everyone else’s way.

If asked, share and chose your words delicately. If you sense someone is afraid to ask, ask them if they want to hear your story or your opinion.

Furthermore, if you feel like you could really share some beneficial information with someone, lend your phone number or e-mail – a waiting room full of emotional women with varied opinions maybe isn’t the right place to rant.

What I wanted to say to this first-timer before I left, which I will say here, is that your baby’s health is first priority and after that, whatever YOU choose to do – is exactly that, YOUR choice.

Trust God and let Him guide your decisions. For all of us: seek Him before speaking.

Brittany Arnold is married with one child and another on the way. Read her Wednesdays on Douglas County Moms. Also check out her personal blog here.

\'Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.\' Ephesians 4:29