Some people keep trying to tell me that the bird is the word, but I have to disagree. The best foodstuff in the world doesn’t even come from birds. Others contend that grease is the word, and I guess that’s a little closer to the mark. I know the truth, though. Sing it with me: Bacon is the word!

For people in other countries who might otherwise complain that Labor Day isn’t an international holiday, we’re going to celebrate International Bacon Day, instead! Shall we? One world? Together? Bacon!