Rimshots 03/01/12

The Honeymoon Is Over
…… Bubba Cunningham’s honeymoon as UNC AD is officially over. On Tuesday UNC hosted a public panel discussion on The NCAA & Big Time Sports or some such esoteric title. The word “public” guaranteed it would quickly dissolve into a screech-fest. Another wonderful “Chapel Hill tradition”. ……….. Had I been “in charge” I woulda begun the show by wheeling out a guillotine and beheading Uncle Julius. It woulda been hard for even John Shoop to upstage that.
Unlike previous UNC “public panels”, at least no pepper spray was needed this time.

John Shoop – Get A Job!
….. Does Guam have a football team? If so, I have a well-traveled offensive coordinator for them. BitterButchBoy John Shoop (and Reverend Mrs Shoop) have way too much time on their hands these days and that means challenges for Bubba and UNC to deal with. The Family Shoop have mounted their trusty steed to joust at the windmill of “abused student-athletes”.
Are there some valid points in their harangue? Probably, but who cares. You have “Butch stink” all over you, John. Go away! Maybe TJ can get you a job as ballboy for the Texans.

THE UGLIEST UNIFORMS EVER !!!
…. Forget Butch’s infamous all navy unis – we have a new #1. The gray on gray crap Royz Boyz wore vs Maryland (that Nike made “out of recycled water bottles”) were THE UGLIEST EVER! If you think they “suxed” on TV, you shoulda seen them in person. Someone should dig two holes – throw those pieces of crap in one hole…. and whoever’s idea it was to wear them in the other hole. Wanna bet Dickie Baddour’s name is on a Nike purchase order somewhere. OR…. wearing that crap is part of the NCAA penalty.

I Like Danica
….. You can always count on me going contrary to the “fan mainstream” at least when fan is spelled b-o-a-r-d m-o-n-k-ey. NASCAR board monkeys delight in bashing Danica Patrick at the same time they download her cheesecake pics. Me, I think she’s pretty cool…. and cute.
NASCAR purists and misogynists and NASCAR-haters have united to decry Ms Patrick’s participation in the Daytona 500 and this seasons race schedule. Why? Because we are a bitch-centric society. Using “bitch” as a verb rather than the noun.
Auto racing is one sport (along with horse racing) where women are not at any competitive disadvantage due to strength, etc. OK, “poker” is another one. If she can drive the same distance under the same conditions and finish first – she wins. I’m good with that.
FemiNazis should be supporting her but her physical attractiveness cancels that out. No gal higher than “a 3” will ever get NOW’s blessing.
Given the choice of dinner at Olive Garden with Danica or a Busch brother or Danica or a Nemechuck or even Danica or a Sadler…. I’m choosing Danica.

Colin Cowherd
…… I may have noted this before but Colin Cowherd is, by far, my favorite ESPN national radio guy. If I listen at all to any ESPN radio guys, it’s Colin. He’s not so good playing slap & tickle with Michelle Beadsle on SportsNation but he is very good on his own radio show. ….. and I “get” the shticks of both Skip Bayless and Stephen A. Smith.
All bright guys who purposely gig board monkey mentalities with provocative opinions. Gee, why would I like that ?????

BobLee Back At Dean’s Dome
….. My Four MUSTS For Attending a Dean’s Dome Game – (1) Complimentary tics …. (2) Lower Level …. (3) Parking Pass ….. (4) Good Friends. I had that combo Wednesday night. PLUS – The Fat Cat Pre-Game Buffet !!! Such a good deal that Blondie even went along. …. and the parking pass was “around back on Roy’s Row” – Hubba Hubba!
And we went over early and shopped for an hour at A Southern Season. Other than those AWFUL UNIFORMS it was a wonderful evening.

Davy is Dead
…… Mop-top “Monkee” heartthrob Davy Jones has taken The Last Train To Clarksville at 66. Heart attack. No, it was not HIS mother that created Wite-Out. That was another Monkee’s mom. Wouldn’t you like to have a nickel for every time Davy had to say “No, I’m not that guy on The Partridge Family”.