When I was a kid, I ran track. One time, during a 4x100 meter race, I was running as the anchor. As I was passed the baton, I took off, and the other children on the team began cheering, "Pat, turn the fan on!" Instantly, I knew the implications of this pun-ishing cheer: I must win, or I must die. I turned my "fan on", and, in truly glorious fashion, crossed the finish line and won the race. The others worshipped me as a deity from that day forth. Also, God told a bird who told my Dad to name me this, and goddamnit, he did. patrickfannon is the best username on this website. Ever... Ever.