(Picture by Fox_Fotography!!!!)
Leather Bear Tails is about the leather journey of my slave and I. It deals with all parts of the leather and BDSM experience from safety to predators, to skills, and all of the lovely mistakes that she and I make along the way!!
Also!! I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it can be found for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us" it is available for purchase here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html

Or on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Rest-Us-K-E-Enzweiler/dp/1329062213/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1432825657&sr=1-2&keywords=m%2Fs+for+the+rest+of+usI am the founder of the Albuquerque Masters Group. We meet once every other month. The group is open to all who wish to explore their Mastery, slavery, or Dominance and submission. Please contact me here or at my email : Bigdykebear@yahoo.com for more information! The meetings are free to all who wish to attend!

If you are interested in power munches, skills workshops or play parties in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:

aelmailing@gmail.com

If you are interested in active online community please find:

Fetlife.com

Group names for the Albuquerque Community Include:

Land Of Enchantment Fetlifers

Albuquerque Kinksters

KinkySpot Clubhouse

Albuquerque Master/slave forum

New Mexico Leather League: Leather/Kink/Fetish and More

Friday, February 1, 2013

The complexity of Butches and Femmes

Last week we were honored to be able to present at AEL. We had a blast! My slave and I did the topic butches and femmes, here is her opening to what was an amazing night! Thank you to everyone who attended and whop wote about it afterwards. We were both very touched and moved by what you had to say:)

Hello
everyone!I ame--,slave to Master and a femme identified queer woman of color. The reason
why I use so many adjectives in describing what I am is that all of these have
had a pivotal part in my journeytowards
embracing my femme identity. Growing up I was very much a tomboyand refused to wear dresses or shop in the
girls section of the stores. This felt very comfortable to me, and it was what
I needed to feel like my identity was my own.

I didn’t
come out of the closet as gay until I was about 20. By that time my gender expression
had started to change.And I began
toexperiment withwhat is viewed as more traditionally feminine
attire.Just like with my choice to wear
masculine clothes when I was youngerthis was a decision I made on my own and for myself.While the outside world seemed to be more
accepting of my new form of gender expression. The queer women’scommunity that I was now a part of had a very
hard time acceptingme as one of their
own. I was under a lot of p[pressure by my lesbian friends to assume a more
masculine form of gender expressionbecause it was more acceptablefor a womanof color who was fat
to be masculine identified.It wasn’t
until I picked up a bookabout female AfricanAmericanblues artiststhat I was first
exposedto queer fat woman of color.

Artists like
Betsy Smith were anepiphany for me and
I now had my first set of femme idolsthat I could look up to.

The other
complication of my femme identity was the assumptionby manyqueer women that my femme identitymeant that I was a passive partner in bed, in other words I was thought
to be a pillow queen based on my gender expression and nothing else.
That is if I was evenconsidered queer
at all.

As my femme
expression became stronger and more 3 dimensionalin a way that suited my unique identityI began to openly address the issuesof femme Invisibility that I was
experiencingwithin the queer community.

Femme invisibility
refers to the lack of social and sexual recognition and validation that women
with a feminine gender expression experience in queer womenspaces. Although this type of invisibility
canexists in all spaces, it is particularly
hurtful whenthe community that we are a
part of does not recognize us.

In other
words we are not viewed as gay unless we have a butchpartner on our arm.And even thenwe still remain questionable and are viewed as mere touristsin the world of queer women’s sexuality.

Some of the
ways that I have dealtwith my own femmeinvisibility have been to be more vocaland open about my enjoyment of same sex
relations. IN other words I talk about pussy a lot, and I eveninclude hand gestures and sound effects. If
the people around me don’t get the message about what a happy poon hound I
amthen at least theyhave the decency to look disgusted and walk away.

Especially when I get into waxing
philosophical about my love of camel toe.

I alsofind it very affirming to talk with other
femmeswho enjoythe complexity of their sexuality luckily
they usually have more hand gesturesfor
me to try out.

And last but
certainly not leastI embrace the power
of the femininityof the women around
me. I learned the importanceof
thiswhen I became an allyin the transgendered rightsmovement. It was transgendered womenwho first showed me the importance of
supporting and embracing the divine feminine in everyone. The respect that I
had regarding their femme identity gave me the insightto have respect for my own.And finally I have come to find a lot offreedom inMiddle Eastern and African dance. This allows me toreconnect with my bodyand its feminine strength.When I look at other belly dancers it is a
reminder to me of the power of my femininity.

About Me

I am a Master identified lesbian. My slave and I have been together in in a 24/7 dynamic for 14years. This shows how patient she really is... I have written a book called "M/s for the Rest of Us." It is available here: http://www.lulu.com/shop/k-e-enzweiler/ms-for-the-rest-of-us/paperback/product-22151343.html
I love discussing M/s in real life terms, not just the ones put out there by unrealistic, holier then thou, better then everyone people. We are real people living a real life, it involves mistakes, miscommunication, undone chores, and the experiment gone wrong. ie... playing with emergency candle wax. And neither I nor she will put out there that our flawed lives are any better then anyone else's!!!