Search

I didn’t run as an entire cold front dumped itself on Milton Keynes, and, after a couple of weekends a go when I ran 10k in the pouring rain. It didn’t appeal to me.

This made me realise.. I’m not motivated to run.

At this moment in time I dread every training run. My “go out and see how things are” runs are ok, because i literally just go and see how it is. But training runs with distances and pacing… well they are turning me into a bit of a nervous wreck.

So I’m pulling out of my half marathon at the end of September.

I started running to challenge myself and i ended up enjoying it. Now if i’m not enjoying it I don’t want to do it or finish any distance i’m on, or anything that happens on a run completely phases me, and i’m ruined. Then I feel like a failure.

Why continue to train for something you aren’t looking forward too?

When I was training for Paris, I was really looking forward to it. Yes I was scared, Yes I was nervous, Yes I didn’t think I would make it, but I believed I could, and I enjoyed pushing myself. That’s just not there this time.

I’ll get it back I’m sure! But right now It can’t be on the table.

So, I guess that means I can throw myself in my next annual goal of losing 10lbs (Half the issue with the Half was that it wasn’t really on my ‘plan’.. ).

CORRECT!

I really like this idea of “a pin a day” as well, something little to push me through the next few weeks.

My weight on my motivation board got to 186 pounds, which means to reach my goal i need to get to 176.

I just weighed in today and i’m back up to 191 pounds 😦

I can’t lose motivation again…

10lbs to go! That’s what I have to focus on… so I guess I have two goals, the realistic 191 – 181, and the ideal of getting it down to 176.

So lets hope my pin a day helps with it!

Today i’ve pinned the best butt workout. I’m gonna lay my mat out on my landing and have a good time of it 🙂

Yesterday I managed pretty much everything on my list, except the milkshake… but we ordered cookies so that’s still fun 🙂