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Janna is a staff writer for The Hudsucker. Born and raised in a small Ontario town, she made her move to Toronto for university and immediately fell in love with the excitement and pace of the big city. She holds an Honors Bachelor of Fine Arts in Film Production from York University, specializing in editing and screenwriting. She currently works as an assistant editor for a television production company. Janna loves stories told in all mediums, especially film, and takes herself to the movies as much as she possibly can. She can generally be found taking a Zumba class, exploring some of Toronto’s lesser-known gems, or relaxing with her fluffy feline roommate.

Orphan Black is a critically acclaimed sci-fi series from BBC America featuring human clones. Its first two seasons garnered rave reviews, and its third season airs Saturday nights at 9/8c on BBC America and SPACE. Our writer, Janna Jeffrey, recaps every episode of the third season here on The Hudsucker. Orphan Black is back!

Beware: As this is a recap column, there are spoilers ahead. Read on if you dare!

Credit BBC America

In this season’s premiere of Orphan Black, we were thrown right back into the action: Sarah and Mrs. S had a falling out, we began to be introduced to the new Castor clones, Helena has gone missing, and we got some awesome clone-as-another-clone action. This show wastes no time, that’s for sure!

So here we are: Episode 2. We’re reminded that the facial scarred, Mohawk-sporting clone that was kept trapped in Marian Bowles’ basement has escaped, and then we dive right into the story. Said clone—we’re going to call him Mohawk Clone, for our sanity—has picked up a lady friend and brought her back to his hotel room. They’re flirty, he pours her a drink, and when she turns around to face the window, we can see him standing behind her. Except it totally isn’t him, it’s definitely Mustachio Clone from the last episode. And then the girl turns back around, and bam, Mohawk is back. Yeah, this doesn’t look so safe. The girl lies down on the bed, and she and Mohawk get down to business. Sexy business. They’re in the middle of having sex when, all of a sudden, an extra pair of arms slides over her body. Yeah, Mustachio Clone is joining in. Joining in!!!

Who does that?!

This poor girl is, understandably, freaked out. Mohawk is all casual about it, sitting there next to Mustachio like introducing your genetic identical in the middle of sex is totally normal. Newsflash: that is not normal! Mohawk introduces Mustachio as Seth, and says, “We’re brothers. We were taught to share.”

After the credits, we join Sarah and Kira, who are walking with Cal (Michiel Huisman). They are the cutest little family ever, and I want them to be happy always. Cal takes Sarah and Kira to a house that he’s just bought—he wants them to move into it with him. This is too cute! It’s all going to go wrong, isn’t it? Everything cute on Orphan Black is ruined.

Credit BBC America

We go back to Mohawk and Mustachio, aka Seth, who are being weirdly homoerotic as they tease each other about the night before. There’s a knock on the door, and it’s Paul (Dylan Bruce), our favorite double agent. Turns out he was working for Castor all along, working for Leda as a spy. It all just makes me like Paul even less. Paul runs some tests on Mohawk and Mustachio/Seth—logic tests, it seems—and gives them another set of orders.

This episode is really checking up on everyone—we get to see Scott running tests on Cosima at Felix’s loft, confirming that she’s in much better health now than she was last season. He also tells her that one of DYAD’s doctors, Doctor Neilan, wants to see her. Before Felix lets her go, he hands her a new clone phone—this season’s phones are blue. You have no idea how much I love the way Felix looks out for all the clones, even though none of this is technically his problem. He’s Sarah’s brother, and these clones are her sisters, so they’re Felix’s family, too. I adore that.

Next we wind up in Scarborough with Alison and Donnie at a soccer game. Alison is ready to absolutely ruin Marci, the woman running for school trustee, but Donnie still has some reservations—namely, that they can’t afford a campaign and might even need to sell their house. There’s a hilarious moment where they wonder what they’ll do with Doctor Leakie’s dead body beneath their garage, and then Alison’s old drug dealer, Ramon (Alex Ozerov), wanders by. Turns out he’s planning to close up his illegal business so he can go off to college. This gives Alison an idea, and her devious little face is my favorite.

Sarah is pulled from the cutest game of indoor family ball hockey ever by a phone call. It’s Detective Art Bell (Kevin Hanchard), Beth’s old partner. It’s so nice to see Art again! I love how good this show is about keeping track of its characters and including them in its storylines as the seasons progress. Art’s been reinstated to his old position on the police force, and he’s calling Sarah about a new case—the woman from earlier has filed a police report about our very own Mohawk and Mustachio/Seth. Art recognizes them as being identical to the Prolethean, Mark, from last season, and wants to know what’s up. Sarah says she’ll fill him in.

Credit BBC America

We’re back to Helena’s House of Horrors, where she’s being waterboarded while people from Castor take blood and tissue samples from her body. This poor, poor girl. Hasn’t Helena suffered enough in her life?! An old woman who introduces herself as Doctor Virgina Cody stops the torture because she realizes that Helena is pregnant, and she wants to speak to her.

Cosima and Scott have their meeting at DYAD with Dr. Neilan. He tells Cosima that she’s doing well, but Cosima doesn’t really want to talk about herself—she wants to talk about the escaped Castor clone, and wants to know why they’ve been kept in the dark about that. She’s sassy and on the offensive, and I love her like that. Scott wants to know about the original clone genome, and Dr. Neilan tells them that the Duncans were the ones who sourced the genetic donors for Castor and Leda originally, but the originals have since been lost. DYAD thought Castor died out a long time ago.

Having fun jumping from storyline to storyline? It’s going to keep happening, so hold on tight.

We get to see Art when Sarah turns up at the police station—she briefly impersonates Beth, which Art isn’t too thrilled about, to talk to the woman who was attacked by the Castor clones. We learn that Mohawk’s name is Rudy, and that after she rejected him and his brother, they got angry. They hit her, they wrote down information from her ID, and took a sample of her hair. We also learn that all the Castor clones have the same tattoo on their left forearm: a picture of a two-headed horse.

Late at night, Ramon meets Alison and Donnie at the soccer field. It is amazing to see Donnie and Alison organizing covert illegal activities, and I think they may be my favorite couple on this show. I am officially Team Hendrix! It turns out that Alison wants to buy Ramon’s business—his inventory, his client list, everything. She wants to take over. Donnie’s hesitant at first, and Alison clearly didn’t discuss this plan in full with him ahead of time. But she explains that being the prescription pill dealer for half the soccer moms in their area will bring a lot of people around on Alison when she runs for trustee, and Donnie agrees. They’ll start selling illegal wares to help Alison get trustee votes. Team Hendrix is amazing.

Credit BBC America

Mustachio/Seth is on the phone with Mohawk/Rudy—he’s waiting for someone. Some doctor. As they talk, Seth starts spasming and writhing in pain; he and his brother call it “glitching”. It’s implied that the Castor clones have some sort of genetic disease, just like the Leda clones do—and it looks like Seth has it pretty bad. Rudy talks him down, and then we see what Rudy’s been doing while Seth has been glitching: he’s been breaking into Felix’s house.

Nope! No, I am not okay with this!

Nobody is home, of course, so Rudy takes his time, wandering around and searching for something. A lingering shot of Duncan’s old Doctor Moreau book with Rudy in the background implies that this is what he wants: Duncan’s research. Maybe to help fix whatever genetic disorder Seth is suffering from? He doesn’t spot the book, though. Instead, Rudy finds the paintings of the Leda clones that Felix has done, and his eyes linger over the painting of Sarah from the series pilot. You know, the one Felix made for her fake funeral? Go away, Rudy. You’re intrusive and you scare me.

Meanwhile, Helena is having a logic test done on her, just like Seth and Rudy earlier in the episode. She’s distracted with hallucinations—she has a scorpion buddy that talks to her now—and isn’t giving them the answers that they want. Hilariously, she tells the Castor clone that’s supervising her that she’s met his brother before, and that he’s ugly. Helena is amazing. Dr. Cody stops the tests and brings Helena outside. They’re in some sort of military compound, and she sits Helena down for something to eat. Dr. Cody tells her that her family sold her out—that Sarah decided she was expendable. Lies! Well, sort of lies. Helena, brave girl that she is, tells Dr. Cody that she doesn’t believe her. Dr. Cody tells Helena that her family may not think she’s special, but that Castor does.

BBC America

Cal is alone, unpacking his new house, when he hears a noise. He investigates and is greeted with Paul pointing a gun at him. Ugh, Paul, just go away and leave Cal in peace! Cal is the best; he doesn’t deserve to be harassed by you. Paul is menacing and threatening, wanting to know what Sarah knows about Castor. Cal, being awesome as always, stands up to him and threatens him right back. The conversation takes a turn, though, and Paul’s motives are revealed: he knows how dangerous Castor is, and he can’t figure out why Sarah isn’t running away. He still cares about her and wants her and Kira to be safe. He asks Cal to make sure Sarah gets away—and despite how Cal feels about Paul, we can see that he thinks Paul’s warning is valid.

After Paul leaves, Cal tries to call Sarah, but she doesn’t pick up. She and Kira are back at Felix’s— where is Rudy? Please tell me he’s not still in the house—and she’s running Kira a bath. Kira wants to know if she and Sarah are going to live with Cal, because she likes Cal. Aww. While Kira waits for her bath to be ready, she crawls into the fort that she’d built earlier…

And there is Rudy, sitting and looking at her calmly, with two red X’s painted over his eyes. Just like the painting of Sarah that he was examining earlier.

This is not okay. This is not okay!

Sarah comes back out from the bathroom and sees that Rudy’s holding her daughter captive, threatening to harm her. She’s terrified, but tries her best to hold it together—it’s a great performance by Maslany, as always. Rudy wants Duncan’s research, and he wants tissues samples of the Castor original. Sarah tells him that she doesn’t have them and begs him to let her daughter go. Down below Felix’s building, Cal arrives—when Sarah didn’t pick up his call, he got worried. He’s stopped by Seth, who tries to stall him innocently until Cal notices the horse tattoo on his forearm. Cal and Seth fight, grappling together when Seth suddenly glitches. He falls to the floor, writhing in pain and yelling for his brother. Upstairs, Rudy hears him and panics. He pulls out a gun and points it at Sarah. He’s yelling, Sarah’s pleading, Kira is crying… it’s intense. It’s very intense. Eventually, Rudy decides his brother is most important, so he shoves Kira back towards Sarah and runs down the stairs. He sees Seth on the floor, gasping and screaming… and shoots him twice in the chest. He doesn’t even flinch! Rudy drops to his knees and holds Seth while he dies, telling him that he loves him. After Seth is gone, Rudy wastes no time: he flees. Cal is left above the dead body, looking a little stunned. You and me both, Cal.

Credit BBC America

In the aftermath, Sarah and Kira go to Mrs. S’s to pack Kira’s things. Sarah has decided that everyone is right—Kira isn’t safe here anymore. Cal has promised to take her away, to keep them both safe. Sarah reassures Kira that everything will be fine; she’ll be good and safe and will see so many things on her travels with her dad. It’s so sweet, and so heartbreaking. Everyone says their goodbyes, and my tear ducts may or may not have gotten a bit of a workout. Maybe.

After Kira and Cal leave, Sarah decides that the only way they’ll get Helena back is to go after Castor themselves. She decides that the best way to do that is to start with the Castor clone we already know: Mark. Who is, we then discover, in a motel room with his new bride, Gracie (Zoé De Grand Maison). She’s alone in bed and he’s in the bathroom. She comes to the door and asks him if he’s all right—he assures her that he’s fine and tells her to go back to bed. Then he whispers an apology, clamps a towel between his teeth, and takes a blowtorch to the Castor tattoo on his forearm. Oh my god. Now that’s badass.

One of the best things about this episode, in my opinion, is the chance we were given to see more of the Castor clones. They aren’t all completely distinct yet, like the Leda clones, but I think that’s okay—we were told that all the Castor clones were raised together, in the military, so it’s likely that they’re similar. This episode was great for letting us see more of what Ari Millen is capable of as all of the clones, and so far he’s doing a great job. He’s creepy, unsettling, and plays dangerous very well. I’m looking forward to seeing more of Mark, as the Castor clone that lived apart from his brothers and is therefore more distinct. I can’t wait to learn more about him. I’m also thrilled we got to see some more familiar faces in this episode: Cal, Art, Paul, and Ramon. Especially Cal. I can’t wait to see more of them and their interactions with our new male clones and our favorite ladies.

EPISODE RATING: B+

BEST LINE: Sarah, when Cal shows her the new house he bought for the three of them: “You’re a bloody lumberjack, how are you going to live in the city?”

FAVORITE MOMENT: The opening of the episode, featuring Mohawk and Mustachio playing creepy sex games with an unsuspecting woman in their hotel room. It’s creepy and unsettling in so many ways, and had great performances by Ari Millen. It’s a really intense, captivating way to start off the episode.

What did you think of this episode of Orphan Black? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!