When I asked doctor if there was anything we could do next, my doctor then told me something I thought I would never hear from a medical professional: "I don't know what to prescribe you next, we've tried everything." This made my heart sink.

I'm not saying that is a bad thing on my Doctor's part, because she is absolutely brilliant at what she does, and not only that, but she cares about her patients. She has saved SEVERAL lives, including my own. But wow, just wow, It makes me feel like that I will never be able to function in society ever again.

I am actually thinking of moving out of Utah, and resorting to using cannabis (medicinal marijuana) if I can get it prescribed to me. This came to mind when my state mental health rehabilitation counselor said to me yesterday (before my doctor's appointment" that medical marijuana actually helped people, especially those diagnosed with ADHD like me, AND autistic children. I even remember reading this last month:
http://www.neontommy.com/news/2012/01/ryan-s-story-medical-marijuana-and-autism

Upon asking her if it will ever be legalized for medicinal use in the state, she said no. I mean, what options do I have left anymore at this point?

I can't move out of state right now either (I have 50 bucks in the bank at this moment and my boyfriend who works full time is just as broke), and I really REALLY don't want to go down illegal routes just to make myself a functioning member of society. I don't want to break the law, I just want to get by and survive, go to college, read a book, I JUST WANT TO LIVE!

I am not even a convicted felon, nor have I ever been convicted of a crime as an adult (just minor Vandalism at 16, I had major guilt and came forward the next day). I haven't even received a traffic ticket since I was 17 (7 and a half years ago), and heck, I even have a perfect credit score (I don't mean to brag, but I'm just trying to point out that I have worked so hard and done so much to get somewhere, and I'm STILL no where). My past employers love me because I am such an amazing worker and I catch on so fast...but I can't hold a job because I can't hold it together. I still remember working at McDonalds and being told I was on my way up to being higher up in the company...and then I fell apart and had to quit.

Does moving out of state and trying to get prescription Cannabis actually seem like a logical route at this point? Or is there another route that I can take that won't end up nearly killing me in the process like the Effexor or Cymbalta did? I mean, the Xanax works OK sometimes, but it makes me sleepy, tired, and sometimes it even makes me even more depressed.

So. this is pretty much last resort for me at this point. I thought I was there with the Effexor, and then I thought I was there with the Cymbalta. But no. The pain never ends.

However, this is what scares me about it:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tetrahydrocannabinol#Toxicity

"There has never been a documented human fatality from overdosing on tetrahydrocannabinol or cannabis in its natural form, [23] though the synthetic THC pill Marinol was cited by the FDA as being responsible for 4 of the 11,687 deaths from 17 different FDA approved drugs between January 1, 1997 to June 30, 2005."

That is what scares me, and after being near suicide several times the past few months, several self-inflicted cut marks, and going crazy because of these pharmaceutical manufactured medications, I question if I should try Marinol.

However, if you know of someone who has tried it and has had success with it, or you know a place on the internet outside of Medhelp that has a story about it, then I am ALL EARS.

I do have a doctor's visit next week, and I will discuss this with her for sure.

Lizzie, I would be more than open to exploring that option, but I have been through almost all of the doctors around where I live (at least 6 come to mind just while typing this), and I am unable to relocate because I don't have the money, and I can't hold a job due to my condition. I don't live in the city either, nor am I close to one (that might explain a lot). This is why I'm hoping to god that I am able to get out of Utah and into Seattle. Maybe I would be better off there socially, medically, and professionally. But for now I'm stuck.

yeah yeah...my daughter in law kept changing drs too. it wasn't until she finally figured out that SHE wasn't the dr and that she wasn't smarter than they were, that she finally was able to start getting the help that she needed. she did the "try this med and try that med" too...would take it for less than a week and when she didn't get an immediate result she stopped taking it because SHE KNEW MORE THAN THE DR ! !

as i stated before, i believe that you have been misdiagnosed and not being treated accordingly. nothing is going to change the way you feel until you get the appropriate treatment.

my daughter in law now travels almost 3 hours to see her doctor. are you willing to put forth that much effort into your treatment?

The problem is m-o-n-e-y. Not just with doctors, but with gas, cars, insurance, and all of that nonsense. Money I need to get there, money I have to pay the doctors, the insurance, and the money I have to pay just to get the meds. The money I don't have, money my parents don't have, money my boyfriend and his parents don't have (they are getting REALLY close to filing bankruptcy), and nor do I. And I don't have much credit available to me on this credit card either, nor would I have a way to pay it off.

So you have to understand, I would LOVE to get better. I would love to get a correct diagnosis. I would love to be feeling like ME again.

It's not the lack of effort, it is just the lack of resources I have available to my disposal. I feel as though they have all been exhausted, and I am trapped.

If you have any ideas on how to circumvent this, then I am listening (and hoping).

This is my current doctor by the way. http://www.healthgrades.com/physician/dr-vera-carlson-2xgm7

As you can tell, she has VERY high marks. Dr. Vera Carlson is a VERY excellent doctor. If it were not for this woman, my mother would probably be dead (as well as me). She has also helped me correct a misdiagnosis already for Genital Herpes done by a bunch of quacks at Intermountain Health Care's Logan Instacare, and a doctor named Todd Brown: http://www.healthgrades.com/physician/dr-todd-brown-ytktx (just look at how awful his score is).

Vera didn't diagnose me with ADHD or any of my other "disorders" either, a team at Utah State University ran by George Wootton did that, as well as a Licensed Professional Counselor that I have now stopped seeing.

Now they want me to do a psych eval for my disability. This is starting to overload me just a bit.

I believe the LPC I was seeing was communicating with my Doctor on my treatment. Not just that, but when I went the LPC, she would make suggestions on where I should go, and give me medication advice. Last year, she kept talking to me about how she was taking Concerta for her ADHD, and the wonders the low dose was doing for her, and how it could benefit me. However, she couldn't prescribe it, and I would have to go to my Doctor to start on it. So, I went to Vera and asked her to put me on it. That's how it happened.

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