Don't I look super hot in my outfit?? That's me at work on halloween obviously. A bunch of kids came up to me and were like, "Ohhh, a clown!" all cheerfully. Guess they didn't notice the blood and fangs.

In 1793 Aeneas Jehoshaphat Bulmers served as Second to your great-great-great-great-great-great-grandfather in his duel over the fair hand of your great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother against Dr. Horatio Increase Boarbaiter, despite his having for years hidden himself from the public eye due to an advanced case of leprosy acquired during his youth of indiscreet fortune-seeking.

Bulmers was later to die on the Congo, while seeking a cure for the death-curse of Dr. Boarbaiter, that, "All ye female progeny, until thee last, shalt... be... blooooonde!"

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It's truly a shame I am no longer there to yell at girls to make out with you.