"[I'm] not mental, or anything, so don't be afraid."

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Office Hijinks

My coworker noticed a resume sitting on my desk from one of the students at the school. It was for a practice interview assignment.

Coworker: So did he interview well?
Me: Actually, SHE wasn’t bad.
Coworker: That looks like a man’s name! Maybe he had a sex change?
Me: That’s one of the first questions I ask in a job interview.
Coworker:…..(silence)…..Seriously?
Me: No! Jeez, I was just kidding!
Coworker: Oh I was gonna say, that took some balls!

***

Today another coworker and I were talking about run-ins with insects. She said she flicked an ant off of her desk, but it was wounded and it made her sad. Our conversation took off from there.

Me: That would make me kind of sad too, but maybe the ant was just faking it, playing on your sympathy. They’re tricky. I almost ran into a spider today in my office. He/she was just hanging there on a thread in my path.

Coworker: You’re right. That is a possibility. Darn…I didn’t think of that. He was just playing with my emotions. He’s a sly one that ant is. Seems like that spider is trying to take over your position or maybe he just needs help with a resume…possibly even looking for a job. Hmm…the possibilities are endless.

Me: Yeah, the spider might be looking for a job! I wonder if they make suits, ties and shoes that tiny? He looked like a crab – not cranky, but he was shaped weird. That could either hurt his chances or help them.

Coworker: I think that would help his chances, Tara. We need diversity :)

Then someone else jumped in and said that the ant is probably waiting outside with his buddies to beat her up at 3pm sharp. I haven’t seen my coworker since 3pm. “Things that make ya go hmm…”