Goodday !
What would be the top 5 benefits of taking up Programming as a hobby?
Obliged.

1. You get to spend endless hours in heated debate with people who, just like
yourself, wouldn't dare send back cold soup in real life
2. You can develop a fat arse and man-boobs and no-one need ever know
3. You lose that pointless faculty for being able to focus on the horizon
4. Your girlfriend/wife/significant-other will no longer need to fight you off
with "I'm tired" or "We did it last week", since you'll be getting all the
(intellectual) satisfaction your body craves and will quickly learn to live
without those time-consuming and messy distractions.
5. Being short, or fat, or ugly, or bald, or boring, or having bad breath is no
longer an impediment to tempering your status anxiety.
Hope that's got you fired up!