Monday, May 15, 2017

#We

Did you hear that Donald Trump posted a tweet that said nothing more than "We?"

As in:

We

This would have remained very mysterious had he not deleted it a few minutes later. But you know the Internet. Lots of people saw it.

I sat down with my dear friend, the faerie Puck, to try to decode this tweet, as it seemed to be an intelligent attempt to get people to finish his thought for him. What could be behind the impulsive We?

Puck betrays my age as he helps me to translate.

are the champions.
Easy and obvious.

will, we will rock you.
No fair, Puck, that's the same song.

all went down to Montreaux, on the Lake Geneva shoreline.
Whoa, Puck! You heavy metal faerie, you! You might be on to something there. Here's what I think:

are stardust, we are golden.
Puck says that's absolutely the last possible one that Donald Trump would choose. He thumbs his nose at me and says Betsy DeVo$$ was using Trump's device, and she meant to tweet

don't need no education.
Thanks, Puck. I love you too. Well, it was Mother's Day ... perhaps he meant

are family. I've got all my sisters with me.
Does he have sisters? I'm not gonna look it up. Instead I'll pump my fist, resistance-style, and say

are strong. No one can tell us we're wrong.
Puck says it could be an early Christmas tweet. Maybe he meant

three kings of Orient are,
or

wish you a merry Christmas.
Wrong time of year, Puck! Nor is it Thanksgiving, so ditch

gather together to ask the Lord's blessing.
I guess we could go on and on like this, especially if you start adding apostrophes:

're off to see the wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz.'ve only just begun ... to live ... white lace and promises ... a kiss for luck and we're on our waaaaayyyy.....
Okay, okay, Puck! I'll stop singing! I know that last one hopelessly anchors me in Geezer Bay!

There is only one ending to that elusive We that I can completely rule out, because the tweeter in question is a hard case, seriously interested only in his map of his electoral college victory and his ratings on the nightly news shows. There is no way, sadly, that Donald Trump would have followed that We with