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Wednesday, 27 November 2013

What are your biggest PET PEEVES?

A pet peeve is a minor annoyance that an individual identifies as particularly annoying to them, to a greater degree than others may find it. Be it in a relationship or with friends or even family members.NO relationship is perfect. No matter how much you love each other and no matter how many things you have in common and agree on, there is always going to be something that one person will do to bother or annoy the other. This has nothing to do with love, but more based on the fact that when two individuals merge their lives together, there are bound to be times when they will clash. You may feel like “one”, but you are still separate people with minds of your own and not everything about your partner will appeal to you, regardless how much you love each other.True acceptance means that we don’t make comments or jokes about our differences. We put the complaint on the shelf.

However, if you know that you need to speak up, it’s essential that you articulate your pet peeves by following these communication rules. It’s hard to be open and receptive when we feel attacked.

Rule #1 – It’s crucial that you talk about yourself rather than finger-pointing. Talk about how you feel, why, what you’d like.

Rule #2 is that you must stay specific so that the other person can understand exactly what is so difficult for you and only address about one topic at a time.

Rule #3 is to focus on constructive win-win solutions, acknowledging what does work well.

Rule #4 is to listen well so you can truly understand the other person’s perspective.

Make your talk a discussion, not an ultimatum, and compromise to find the best solution that best honors you both.

Don't be too hard on your partner. What are the biggest pet peeves about your partner?