It’s My Party, I’ll Cry If I Want To…

We were in Idaho a few weeks ago to celebrate the engagement of Nick’s brother. I was so excited for them, until I found out the date of the wedding… June 10th, on my 30th birthday. For reals? SERIOUSLY?Sharing my birthday with my Brother-in-laws wedding wasn’t what I had in mind for my 30th birthday. I was actually in a really bad mood about the whole thing.

Whenever someone asked what I was doing for my BIG 30, my thoughts of the ultimate summer birthday bash, pool party, BBQ and dinner that weren’t going to happen (ON my actual birthday) upset me. I know, I know. I’m such a brat. But this was a BIG one, 30-years! Why couldn’t they have chosen the weekend before, the weekend after or even the day after? Nope, they chose June 10th, my Birth-DAY. Then to top it all off my darling Brother-in-law (I really do adore him) asked me to make their wedding cake. I begrudgingly agreed and asked to see what they had in mind…

My next thought was, I should have agreed AFTER looking at the picture. Ha Ha.

I did my very best to talk the bride-to-be out of having THIS half and half wedding cake. First of all, I thought it looked trashy and I just didn’t get it. She was determined to include his Jeep rebuilding passion into their wedding and this is how she wanted to do it… WHAT?!? No. No. NO!!!!!! I can’t put my name on this?

Besides, cakes are a HUGE time commitment to bake, build, decorate and then to have travel the cake from Utah to Idaho, there were plenty of reasons why I shouldn’t do it. But honestly, I just wanted to remove myself from any big wedding participation in protest that I had to share MY day and make an unconventional cake. Did I mention that I’m a brat? The resentment and bitterness built up and started stressing me out so much I actually decided I wan’t going to do it.

I called them a few weeks after agreeing to making the cake, to tell them I didn’t feel up to it. My tiny Grinch-heart was pounding in embarrassment as I tried to let them down easy. I told them how I felt and explained that I couldn’t make the cake because of all the potential complications that were giving me anxiety. I felt relieved and horrible all at the same time, but it was fine and someone else could worry about making it. It didn’t help that they were so understanding and gracious as they told me not to worry about doing the cake. Not making the cake was supposed to make me feel relieved and better about the whole thing, but I only felt worse. My heart shrunk three sizes that day, Grinch-style.The wedding plans continued and a few weeks before the wedding they still hadn’t found someone to make the cake they wanted. I overheard a conversation that they planned to make the cake themselves. How in the world was I going to let her do that? Can you even imagine? The thought of the bride making her own wedding cake the night before her own wedding was unbearable, way worse than me making a wedding cake on my birthday. So we made a deal.

Like the sea witch in The Little Mermaid, I told them I would make the cake in exchange for both of their voices. Obviously, there was a little negotiating involved, but we agreed on a game plan. If they were willing to build the cake and frost it, I would touch it up with frosting, flowers, ribbon, a pearl boarder and decorate it WITH the Jeep and mud path just how they wanted. With us getting into town late the night before the wedding. They gave me free reign and told me to do what I thought would look best. My Grinch-heart grew ten sizes that day as I poured my heart and lots of love into this epic wedding cake.

BEFOREAFTER
Team work, makes the dream work. I’m happy to report that I did have a LOT of fun decorating this cake (for those of you who watch my Snapchat @Housewife2Hoste, you know what I mean), they were SO happy with how it turned out and so was I. To make this cake feel more wedding appropriate, I tried to make the Jeep part look as realistic as possible. I made a wide enough switchback trail for the model jeep on the back of the cake and used salted caramel frosting, cocoa power, candy rocks, cinnamon sticks and faux greenery to make it look more rustic (thank goodness for my other mom, who has EVERYTHING on hand). The happy couple LOVED the cake and especially my Brother-in-law. He was so excited to see how it turned out.

As far as my birthday went, it was perfect. I woke up to flowers, cards, a new necklace from Tiffany & Co. a homemade carrot cake and so much love. Yes, I spent the day at the wedding, but I don’t think I’ve ever been more surrounded by family on my birthday. Everyone (especially the bride and groom) went out of their way to make me feel special and wish me a happy day. I got messages, texts and phone calls from friends, loved ones to wish me a happy birthday and after the wedding reception we spent the night playing games, eating my favorite carrot cake and having fun. It was such a good day.
I’m so grateful to be part of such a wonderful family. I can’t believe that I doubted that the day would be fantastic for a second!

I think my biggest take away from this birthday was this: Even though things don’t go exactly as you plan (or want), it doesn’t mean it won’t be amazing. And also, don’t be a brat/Grinch/sea witch because you’ll end up crying on your birthday when everyone is over-the-top kind, thoughtful and go above and beyond to make you feel special on your birthday.