Germany—and, more importantly, Germany's Christmas spirit—is under attack by a man who dresses like Santa, but is, in fact—you guessed it—a Grinch. Of roofies.

The latest crime wave to strike the techno-obsessed but financially stable European nation: some dude dresses as Santa Claus, goes to the festive traditional German "Christmas markets" and passes out drinks with roofies in them. And that's it! No rape, no groping, no nothing, so what the hell? Ten victims in a week! The old Christmastime drug-and-chug trick, eh?

Eight other people at various Berlin Christmas markets have fallen prey to similar attacks - usually with an unidentified man in regular clothes handing out single-shot bottles of alcohol, asking people to join him in celebrating the birth of his child.

A 40 year-old new dad-to-be passing out free liquor and drugs to crowds of partying girls. Jay-Z?