John J. Malone

Created by Craig RicePseudonym of Georgiana Ann Randolph Craig(1908-1957)

“Never look a Greek in the mouth when he comes bearing a gift horse” Malone said cheerfully. He paused in the act of opening the bottle. “I mean beware of the Greek when he comes bearing a horse in his mouth.”— Malone dispense timeless advice in Trial By Fury (1941)

Call it screwball noir, call it hard-boiled farce, call it whatever-you-want comedy, but very few writers have managed to successfully combine the hard-boiled detective novel and comedy. Jonathan Latimer nailed it with Bill Crane, Norbert Davis had a good long run with it and Craig Rice did it with JOHN J. MALONE, her ne’er-do-well bibulous attorney.

Despite being billed as “Chicago’s noisiest and most noted criminal lawyer,” Malone acts more like a private eye than a member of the court. And a particularly hard-drinking and frequent drunk private eye at that. Despite a rep for courtroom pyrotechniques, he’s far more likely to be found carousing around the city looking for clues (or a drink), perstering suspects (or witnesses), or holding court at Joe the Angel’s City Hall Bar than in any court of law.

Along with his boozing buddies, Jake Justus and Helene Brand (later Justus), an affable young and equally hard-drinking couple, he drank his way through a whole slew of novels and short stories, not to mention later film, radio and television appearances.

Jake was a fast-talking publicist, and Helene was a freewheeling, impulsive heiress who loved to drive drunk, but they considered themselves decent amateur sleuths. But it was Malone, seemingly inept and irresponsible, who somehow (luck of the Irish?) manages to crack the case everytime. Even if his methods were a wee bit, uh, unorthodox, and his interpretation of the law rather elastic. Malone always seems less interested in going to trial than in playing P.I.

He wasn’t even supposed to be the star of the show — Jake and Helene were. Malone, in the early books, was at most a third wheel, a member of the supporting cast. But somehow Malone inserted himself into the action, sometimes reluctantly, and sometimes because he smelled a quick buck, to the point that Jake and Helene sometimes seem to be guests in their own series, and often didn’t even show up in the countless Malone short stories. Or in many of the novels after The Big Midget Murders (1942).

Still, despite being a drunk and a blowhard, Malone seems to inspire extreme loyalty in his pals and acquaintances. He has a secretary, the long-suffering, lovestruck, albeit frequently unpaid Maggie Cassidy, and of course Jake and Helene are always on hand. He can also count on the aid of Captain Daniel von Flannagan of the Homicide Squad.

Later, Rice teamed up with Stuart Palmer and the two of them cowrote a mess of short stories featuring Malone and Hildegarde Withers, Palmer’s equally comic spinster sleuth. The stories were later collected in 1963’s People Vs. Withers and Malone.

In films, Malone tended to be played as a heavyweight tough guy. On radio, Malone was rather cynical and humourless, but by the time he made it to the tube, he was a svelter, more happy-go-lucky type with girls stashed everywhere, a rather lightweight version of Craig Rice’s original character.

You want the real deal, go back to the original books and stories. Those zany plots, wacky characters, and weird plot bounces will keep you going…