What you can do if you are being bullied

No one deserves to be bullied and in order to stop it the best way is by asking adults for help. If you can, tell a responsible adult that you trust. Talk to a parent, teacher, key worker, youth worker, police officer, counsellor or any member of staff in your school, club, faith setting or elsewhere in your local community.

You may also wish to tell a friend or phone a helpline. They will be able to listen to you and may be help you work out what you want to happen.

Know your rights

Your school is responsible for protecting you from gender-based and transphobic bullying, discrimination and abuse along with other forms of bullying.

You have the right to be respected and feel safe at your school and in your community, regardless of your actual or perceived gender identity or gender expression.

You are entitled to confidentiality. You do not have to reveal your gender identity to seek help. Unless you are at risk to yourself or to others your teacher or school counsellor does not have to tell your family or caregiver that you are trans or questioning your gender. They should respect confidentiality.

Stay safe

Don’t fight back. Bullies often want some sort of reaction from you and fighting back gives them what they want.

If you fight back, you may get hurt or make the situation worse.

Write down everything

Keep records of any incident including the date, the time, the location and what was said or done. This allows you to have evidence of the incident and means you can pass on the information you have recorded.

If you are being bullied online or in a text, don’t delete the message. You don’t have to read it, but keep it. It’s your evidence and proof that you are being harassed. The police, your parents/carers, or your school authorities can use this information to help protect you from further abuse

Look after yourself

Being bullied and then reporting bullying can be extremely stressful. Remember, you don’t have to deal with bullying on your own. Caring and trusted adults and friends are there to help and support you. There are lots of charities and helplines also for you to turn to.

Get support

Support from the community is important to help you through the effects of being bullied. By meeting and having like-minded people around you, who may have experiences similar problems, you can start to feel supported and gain great strength, gain your self-confidence back and feel less isolated.

Gendered Intelligence holds youth groups in London, Bristol and Leeds, but there are others across the country. Also consider enrolling in a school that has a gay-straight student alliance or diversity club – or even start one if there isn’t one already.