Life, love, spirituality, happenings, humor–plus LGBT life and equality news. It's not a lifestyle–it's a life!

becoming out…

No matter how long someone has been living “out,” it seems that there are always speed bumps along the road of life. Many of these speed bumps in my life come in the form of bumping into people that I have not seen or heard from in years… sometimes decades!

All over again the anxiety rises, the risk presents itself, the closet threatens to enclose.

A decision presents itself.

Is this person important enough in the scope of my life to risk the “rejection” by coming out all over again to? Or were they just a passing acquaintance that I would be better off to simply “drive on over” at 15 mph?

I faced that question again this week. I chose a little of both. To the person I really had a meaningful friendship with, I authentically and unapologetically “came out” to (and it went very well!). To a few other folks who really were not much more than proverbial speed bumps in my life… I just smiled and drove on by.

So, this life… this thing of “becoming who I am”… of being willing to be fully me… is a lifelong journey. Clearly different for each one of us. But I am willing to face the bumps along the road when they arise and enjoy the scenery as much as possible in the meantime. What have your coming out or “pride” experiences been like?

8 Responses

Amen to that! Glad things went well with your acquaintance. It seems those we are closest to seem to be of “like minds” and accepting…most of the time. Living in my hometown has made things difficult, but at the same time, I feel those who I haven’t already come out to already know. Here’s to those “scenic journies.” 😀

Hey Steven! I am glad also! I had lost touch with this friend somehow for years… but it was an important friend and one I was glad to re-find. It was important to live authentically to such a friend that really mattered!

and I agree Q.U., that is so true! Real friends know who you are apart from who you “sleep with.” Reminds me of the quote “those who matter don’t mind–and those who mind don’t matter.”

I feel the exact same way. People in highschool don’t even believe me when I come out because I showed no signs during highschool. Either that, or they think I all of a sudden came up with the idea of becoming gay. Ooorr they think some guy made me bitter which lead to my conversion.
I’m in that ‘second adolescence” stage and I only come out when it is asked of me, or if i get put in a situation that tells me i must come out to avoid feeling uncomfortable.

i guess it’ll always be a scary thing to come out the closet. especially to those who knew you before you were “out”.

“Is this person important enough in the scope of my life”
Therein lies the main question, eh?
You are so obviously important in the lives of so many—just in the essence of who you are, funny, compassionate, nurturing, and evidently intelligent.
You don’t owe anyone an explanation, a confession, or anything else that they don’t deserve if they can’t see and appreciate who you are.