As Tantra often involves vows and samaya related to secret practice, this sub-forum has been created where Vajrayana practitioners can pose questions, and any of our members or staff can reply confidentially by PM.

There is often this view presented in Vajrayana that a woman must have this list of nearly impossible qualities to find in order to be any kind of consort, and that there is no possibility of any kind of realization to happen without these qualities. In my view, the main purpose of having a consort is to realize emptiness, the ultimate nature, while engaged in the sex act, and that the whole thing is taken just as we take any ritual. We have Bodhicitta, proper motivation, pure view, and so forth. We do the practice with awareness and the view of emptiness, and at the end we dedicate merit and that's that. Since realizing emptiness and the ultimate nature is the point of every practice, every act, every moment, and everything we do, why would any relative qualities be required of a consort?

In the Candamaharosana Tantra for example the main gist of the whole thing is that it doesn't matter at all. It says:

"I am nowhere if not in the bodies of all women.
So rejecting all other paths, worship women!
This is the supreme act of worship of me,
And serving me in this way
The aspirant gains satisfaction and supreme power."

Years ago, long before I found Buddhism and I had a more pagan practice, many Goddesses also told me the same thing. I've also found such statements in other Tantras of both Buddhist and Hindu traditions. Yet the official view in Vajrayana seems to be opposite. Can anyone explain to me why this is so, and where this apparent contradiction comes from? Are there two paths or views to take towards this matter?