Hey Reddit, what's it like to live in suburbia?

Hey Reddit, I've lived in inner Sydney, australia, my whole life. I've visited the suburbs but it's hard to know what it's like to live there. What's suburbia like beyond the stereotypes? Why did you move there? What did your future life look like in your head? What kind of lifestyle did you envision? Did it live up to it? What's the best thing about living where you do? What's the worst? Is there anywhere you'd prefer to be now?

I think one of the most accurate descriptors would be comfortable. Seriously, though, real estate is cheap (compared to urban real estate, of course), commodities are easy to come by (even more so now thanks to things like Amazon), privacy is plentiful, and, well, the standard of living is great. I spent a week in Rome, Florence, Pisa, etc. and while it was awesome (sidenote: there are so many cool things to see in these cities that you can simply walk around!) everything was more cramped. Of course, European cities are more cramped than American ones, from what I understand. Actually, in Rome, there was this 4-star hotel that was pretty damn great (considering size/room as well).

The downside is that you can't complain to all your hipster friends about how boring suburbia is, and how it's ruining culture and the backbone of America! I'm moving to a major city this fall, though, so I'll be better able to compare living in a suburban area with living in an urban area.

In truth, though, a major drawback would be all the gasoline that is burned by the fleets of cars. If anything's more than a mile away, people mostly drive. If something's, say, 1/2 a mile away, but you'd have to cross several roads, people mostly drive (there aren't any crosswalks here. At all.). Hope that changes (go go, cleaner energy!).

Agreed. I've lived in a city the last few years, and there are many things I love about it, but it's also a pain. There's no escape from disruptions caused by other people, there's not as much privacy, everything is more expensive, etc. I'd prefer living comfortably in the suburbs and driving into the city when I want to do something there.

Of course. There's more to Europe than its major cities as well. I spent some time in a few smallish towns off the, I believe A11 and A8, but not a lot (as previously mentioned, I had but a week). If only I had the time (and money!).

Aight. Getting a taste of the real life, not the fabricated tourist trap! For me, if I would go to the US, I would love to visit some mid-sized American towns to get to know the true American identity.

It's very stable. Things that you use for day to day life are easy to come by and easy to find, as long as you have a car. You drive all of the time however. You drive to get everywhere, the idea of going somewhere and driving are intricately linked, walking anywhere further than the nearest other neighborhood is ridiculous, and even then if a car is available people will still drive to neighborhoods bordering theirs.

You spend a lot of time in houses. Most of the time you spend with friends and other people will be in someone's house, there is no going out to bars or clubs or local hangout spots. It's far cheaper and (for many people) more comfortable to simply go to someone's house when houses in the suburbs are so much larger than dwellings in cities (apartments and townhouses). You also end up spending a lot more time at home, but at least your house is much larger and usually better furnished than an apartment in a city.

Depending on where you live people can be really great, or they can be unbearable assholes/idiots. People move here to be able to live in their vision of "comfort" while being close enough to commute to a good job each day. The lifestyle that people end up living is generally the one that they envisioned. Also almost all of the jobs in the immediate area are in the service area, either stores, gas stations, or restaurants, with some churches, gyms, and other community areas sprinkled in.

And as many people brought up, the pros are how convenient and stable life is, and how you have a bit more privacy (unless you have an overbearing homeowners association) along with the safety and lack of excessive noise, and having a big house, but the cons tend to be that boredom can strike heavily, and that there can be long periods of time when there is little to nothing to do.

I used to live in a nice suburban area in Kansas but now live in an urban area of Seattle. One of the things I really miss is feeling safe walking around at night. I loved to be able to go running at 10-11pm if I felt like it. The worst part was my stuck up neighbors and living in an area with an HOA.

When I first moved into my house, I was the crazy neighbor in a really quiet neighborhood.. I was a bachelor who liked to drink, so I'd have wild soirees with naked drunk girls, fistfights in the street, and giant parties that had to be broken up with cops and mace cans. One of me neighbors would drive by, beeping his horn, flipping me off out his car window. BUT, I deserved it.

However, that was years ago, and I've slowed way, way down.

My HOA actually hired a lawyer to send me a cease and desist letter about my behaviors, but I'd already decided to stop before that.

I also understand why my neighbors were so pissed and I feel bad about it now. I'd never do that shit again.

If you think living in a suburb is boring then it is entirely your fault. Things are better since I started driving last Spring, but before then I still made the best of what I had. If I wanted to go skate with my friends, I would walk 3-4 miles to go skate with my friends. If I wanted to spontaneously go see a movie alone 20 minutes before it started, I would grab my board and skate there to go see it.

Maybe I'm just saying this because I'm 17 and I don't know shit yet, but don't let your enviroment control you completely. If you're tired of being bored then don't be anymore. You're the only one who can do anything about it.

I live in Scottsdale, Arizona, and enjoy the suburbs because, in my area, there's a lot of undeveloped desert land with great views of the mountains and reasonably dark skies at night (star gazing). This is only because I live kind of on the outskirts however. It's still a suburb, no doubt, but has some of the advantages of rural living, but anything I need is really close. I work from home and so don't need to commute. I go running at 2am and it's just me and the desert, not a car in sight for hours. I see coyotes, javelina, and owls a lot, sometimes bobcats.

Some would call this boring but I love it here, love the quiet... it's very peaceful. There's plenty to do in a 20 min drive, but even better, real wilderness is pretty accessible (hiking, camping, etc), and of course, travel out of town. The thing I miss most is being close to authentic ethnic restaurants and a university. The closest (ASU) is about 40 min away.

I think the trick to doing suburb living well is to make it part of an integrated, purposefully designed lifestyle. For instance, if you're younger/single, or would have to commute, that changes the equation a lot. But I'm married and just had a baby. Next time we move, we'll probably move further away from town. The main limit is needing broadband access.

A lot of people in my town commute to the city by train. To get to the train, you need to take a local bus (or drive, but good luck finding a parking spot). It would make sense to (at the very least) have a transit system that ran reliably during rush hour, and had a schedule that was somewhat in sync with the train schedule. Instead, the buses rarely follow their schedule, occasionally don't show up at all, and the schedule will sometimes have you waiting 25 minutes for a train (quite the feat, considering the buses run every half hour).

Biking in the suburbs is fine if the place you're going to is fairly close, but it rarely is, and you can forget about it in the winter.

If you are in a close suburb to somewhere like Chicago, there is more than enough public transit to get you around town/into the city, so you don't need a car at all. And if you live in a city like Atlanta, even if you live in the city, you still need a car. Everything is too spread out and public transit is horrible compared to any other large city I have been to....

I don't know about that, I lived in Atlanta and used MARTA for everything. I had no problem getting to work, school or to visit friends on public transportation. I didn't even bother getting a driver's license until I moved away. I've gone back to visit family since and once I got there, I parked my car and used the bus to get anywhere I wanted to go. Only crazy people try to drive a car in Atlanta.

I lived inside the perimeter. I know it was crappy trying to get around in most of the suburbs without a car. Some of the suburbs were worse than others but I never really had any occasion to head out there.

I don't remember ever having any problem getting anywhere I needed to go inside the city though. I don't really consider 2 miles a very long walk. Maybe we just have different perspectives.

No, 2 mile walks aren't the problem. It is that I would expect a 2 mile walk going say 15-20 miles with public transport in the Chicago area. When only about half the distance from one place to another inside of what is considered Atlanta in mailing addresses is covered by public transportation, their system is significantly worse than what is found in most major cities. Sure, it beats the public transportation of somewhere like Fergus Falls, Minnesota, but compared to any city of a comparable population, it is pretty terrible.

You should try exploring to see if there isn't an 'old' district of town where the chains haven't taken over.

While I still didn't have a car, I thought my old suburb was boring as well, but I recently visited and explored outside of the beaten track and discovered there's an old-town strip where everyone all the mum and pop stores congregate.

The downside is that this strip is far away from the metro, and bus stops so its not easy to get to. Also they don't advertise, so you'll never be naturally tempted there.

I don't even lock my doors unless I'm going to be away for a few days. I have my irrigation watering my lawn twice a day. I go to the nursery to buy new plants/flowers for my landscape every year. I have a hot tub in my back deck. I love cutting my grass, then going to my fridge and getting a beer to drink as I watch cable TV. I sit on my front porch swing and smoke blunts. I go out with friends and then we all head back to my house to cook some good food, or grill up stuff on the grill. I don't have to worry about my lease being up because I own the house (mortgage).

My neighborhood is extremely quiet and people leave other people alone. I like my immediate neighbors, and don't know the rest. When I get in bed at night, I let out an "ahhhhh...." sometimes because it is that comfortable.

Yeah like victoriaa said, nothing ever really happens. I also have a cop for a neighbor three houses down. There's always people walking around my neighborhood for exercise (the street is a huge circle), and they always wave if I'm in my yard or driveway, or ask me how I'm doing.

I'm friends with my neighbors on the left and right of me - one of them is a retired firefighter and we get along the best. He liked my dog so much he went and bought the same kind. It's a wonderful life in suburbia.

For entertainment, I have a lesbian couple who rents the house across the street from me and they often have huge arguments that spill out onto the front lawn. The cops have been there a few times but I don't know if one of the women called them or it was an annoyed neighbor.

I had to call the cops on an ex girl-friend once who broke into my house at 5am to "talk", then tried to stab me with her keys when I told her to GTFO.

So suburbia also has its crazy moments, but for the most part it's smooth sailing.

I lived in suburbia, florida, USA. Old people. Old people everywhere. Whenever you open your garage, at least two old people are looking at you the entire time. They're always doing 'yard work', or 'taking walks', but GAH, I fucking hated being watched every time I left my house. My 'neighbors' had to know every little thing.

That's my biggest complaint. I was lucky that four other families had kids my age in a neighborhood of about 70. If it weren't for them, I wouldn't have made it through my childhood.

I guess it really depends on what you value and what you like to do. NYC was definitely better for music, comedy clubs, bars and museums. And pretty much anything of luxury that could possibly want was within 10 miles of me. Also public transportation was much more useful (I wouldn't say that transportation in general is any better though, just different norms). Everyone out of town was dying to visit, so even if you have Asperger's, your social capital gets a bump by living in a city.

However, it was not all good. Firstly, the municipal tax is annoying. I don't know what they did with all that money, certainly not clean the boroughs (they barely clean Manhattan). Secondly, general dirtiness of the city. I don't know why I never really got used to this. Third (and this is more of a personal peeve of my own), the smugness of urban "sophisticates". You don't know how many times I've heard "you know, NYC has the lowest carbon footprint per capita in the US" from elitist yuppies. Yeah ok true, but its because of millions of people who take the train to work and buy canned foods from their bodega. No thanks to the types that take cabs and eat restaurants that serve Chilean sea bass and avocados in the middle of winter. Sorry extravagant New Yorkers, the low per capita footprint happens in spite of you, not because of you.

Number 1 thing good thing about the suburbs (and you have to be a parent to appreciate it): public schools. In general, you get better value for what you pay to live there. Most urban schools are just mini correctional institutes. Private schooling is the norm among parents that can afford it or put a high value on education.

Another thing is prices and personal space is much more reasonable. Let's just put it this way, you actually have enough space to buy stuff to fill it. And I have a large garden that means I can grow my own dinner 2 nights out of 7 during summer.

Number 3 is good, cheap eats. Let me tell you, the Korean food in Annandale, Virginia is better than anything NYC can dish out, and much more reasonable. There are great finds everywhere it seems, just stay clear of the chain restaurants.

Not that there aren't schools where you will turn out just fine, but by comparison suburban schools are better (even in the NYC suburbs). I am just drawing attention to it because when younger, childless people take into consideration where they want to rent or buy, they don't seem to care how the schools are. Think of all the cool, trendy areas that college age and new grads flock to; very few of them are known for their public schools.

Honestly NYC is better than most cities in the US for public schools and the contrast between them and their suburban counterparts is not as severe. But other cities are worse, and dismissing that as a reason why a lot of people move to the suburbs is disingenuous.

And yes, my bias is slanted, I am a parent. I didn't move because I was worried about my kids getting into drugs in the city, not going to a "white" school (actually where I live now the population is still less than 50% white), or similar prejudices. I just was more impressed by the schools out here. And also, I didn't grow up in a big city, I grew up in a large town, so I when I lived in Manhattan, I didn't get too attached. The move followed a career, and the lifestyle change was secondary.

Where I live is an odd sort of suburb, in that the closest "urb" is three hours away.

The things that are better than the city are MUCH better than the city: never any traffic, abundant free parking, cheap housing, nice friendly neighbors, quiet evenings, as a single woman I always feel safe in my home, a huge backyard, lower cost of living, generally easy, comfortable living.

The things that are worse than the city are MUCH worse than they city. No good bands or comedians ever come to town. The arts are almost non-existent unless you count community college plays and murder mystery dinners. There is no good food outside of my kitchen. seriously. The food at these crappy chain restaurants makes me want to stab myself repeatedly so maybe they will have to airlift me to civilization for treatment and I can finally get some decent food whilst in recovery. Same with the shopping: if they do not sell it at Target, Wal-Mart or Home Depot you ain't gettin' it. Furnishing my house has been nearly impossible - everything is super traditional like Ashley, Furniture Row, etc; and buying furniture online sight unseen is a risk I've not been quite willing to make (although I am about to take the plunge with a bed, wish me luck.) Nothing is within walking distance. There is almost nothing interesting or unique anywhere.

All in all it is bearable, but definitely a temporary situation, 3-4 years by my calculations. It is allowing me to work a lucrative job and buy a home in one of the few markets that has been steadily going up even through the recession, I will be able to get out of debt, save a few dollars, and then move back to the city a little bit ahead of the game :)

EDIT: I think if I had a solid group of friends here, it would be more fun. backyard bbqs, cocktail parties, cooking interesting dinners together, that sort of thing. So who knows, if I can create an interesting social circle in the next several years, maybe I will be tempted to stay. But a year in it is not looking promising. I'm single and pretty much everyone I've met is married with school age kids, goes to church a lot and they come to my house to get away from all of that. Happy to be a refuge temporarily, but that is not my destiny.

One thing to remember about suburbs is that many people who move there want a safer, less hectic environment for their growing families. The schools are generally better, the air is cleaner, life has a slower pace, there is less crime, and just about everything you need is less than 20 minutes away by car. You can have a much bigger place for the money, compared to "hip" areas of the city. I have lived everywhere from small towns to dense urban cores to suburbs, and I find that now, in my mid 30's, the burbs' suit me well.

Yeah, it's boring; for teens and 20-year-olds. I don't recommend it for anybody under 25. Most of the cliches are true. For me, I was thrilled when yesterday, the patio furniture I had my eye on was 30% off. Now I can sit outside, enjoy my sangria, and watch the sunset in style. With only the sound of the occasional passing car, barking dog, or chirping bird to interrupt.

tl;dr: It sucks when you're young, can be pretty cool when you're older

Nah, I'm 45 and suburbs bore the hell out of me. It's not just the endless homogeneity of the strip malls and chain restaurants. It's also the unoriginal people who talk only about sports and lawns and t.v. shows. Yawn.

I also find it dreadfully boring to clean a McMansion - it takes me only an hour to clean my condo, and 30 minutes to mow the postage stamp lawn.

There's nothing more boring than commuting to work. I'd rather not waste my life away in a car.

My brain went to complete mush in the 'burbs. I need the cultural and visual stimulation of a city. I also like being around lots of people, and find it energizing.

Well, from what I read and saw in movies I thought it would be totally different. Like, everyone would have a picket fence, 1.5 kids and a dog, and live for BBQ's on the weekend and drive an SUV. But my neighbours are totally diverse; single parents, punks, New Canadians, young singles. It's been cool thus far.

Imagine, for a moment, a city. Any city. Now take all the interesting places that you would want to go in the city (restaurants, bars, theatres, etc.) and either remove them completely, make them close early, or spread them as far apart as humanly possible. Now take the public transit system, and make that close early too, and remove some of its reach so that it's more difficult to get anywhere. Now take all the teenagers and young adults and replace them with old people. You are now imagining the suburbs.

I've lived in a suburb my entire life. I suppose I like it because I've had an easier time - I can't imagine what it would be like if I were some kind of outcast, loner, etc. But I've had a pretty good time. I like most of the people, I like the backyards and fancy city amenities (pool, playgrounds, tennis courts, free wifi), and that suburbia (tries to) have a sense of community.

I've lived in all three settings (rural, urban, suburban), will try and describe them.

Compared to the city? Suburbs are safe. Probably because people there are there to raise kids and not be troubled. It's gotten to the point where people give up their freedom to homeowners associations to make sure their neighbors don't do ANYTHING different, like, paint their house w/o permission, or build a shed w/o permission. It's weird.

They also lack culture. No good music venues. And yet, so much easier to have a band in the burbs.

Compared to the country? No woods to walk around in with friends. Just lots of streets.

South west suburbs here. It's nice - you have to drive most places, although you could get away with riding if you're fit and active. There are some suburbs and situations you try to avoid - train stations late at night, etc. But otherwise it's mostly quiet and ordinary.

As a lifelong New Yorker and generally highly-urbanized individual, I have an extremely negative view of suburbs. I am, of course, incredibly biased, and I know this. However, my experience with suburbs is limited to Long Island and a smattering of other cities' suburbs (Boston, DC, maybe a couple others I can't remember) and I wonder -- are suburbs ever really any different from other suburbs? Cities absolutely have their own unique feel, but I'm not so sure about suburbs. How about if you ignore the associated city for a moment and based judgement on the merits of the suburbs alone?

As a side note, American Beauty definitely did not help your guys' case.

There's shit to do in my suburbs. Schools to climb, bogs to explore, people to hang out with. Everything is definitely farther away, which sucks if you don't have a bike. It takes an hour to get downtown. I once dated a girlfriend who lived in the suburbs on the other side of the city, which was a crazy two hour bus ride.

You might get a more accurate Australian Perspective from /r/Australia. My answer from a Melbourne perspective is that it depends on where you are living. There are good suburbs and boring suburbs to live in (and they vary in price as a result) Places like Camberwell, or Fairfield have good shopping areas with cafes etc. Further out, and away from the train lines and its a bit more boring.

It's kind of boring. If you're an adult, it just means you have to drive a little longer to get to work, and it's a little quieter at night. If you're a kid, it means you spend a lot of time running around like a little savage through people's yards.

Interesting question. I'm living on the outskirts of a german city, so can add some experiences from our kind of "suburbia". I'd like to add some questions too:

Are there any shops, ATMs, fuel stations etc. in your area or, if not, how far do you have to drive to get things like fresh rolls on a sunday morning, or money or for a fillup?

I myself am pretty lucky in this aspect. Everything is in walking distance - hell, on foot or by bike I'm in the shopping centre before I'm at my car (which is in an underground garage right 'round the block). If I want to get fresh rolls on sunday morning, there are small bakeries everywhere which can be reached by bike in 5 minutes max or by car in two minutes. Supermarkets are also within bike distance - I'd say, nobody in our city has to drive more than 2km to reach the next supermarket.

Can you get around the city easily by bus?

The next bus stop is usually a 5 minute walk away, all over town. If unsure about its location, there's an Android app for that ;) Students get free tickets for public transit, so there's no real need to get my car from the garage (again, the bus stop is nearer than my car...) unless I want to leave the city. Buses drive on a quarter to half hour schedule, depending on the line.

What is the speed limit?

Usually the main roads through the outskirts of the city are 50km/h while the residential roads are limited to 30km/h

Do you have a lot of bicycle / footpaths?

I can go from here to my GFs place (2.3km away) only using bicycle paths, right through the residential areas.

We always wanted a dog. We used to live in the city centre (North-Eastern Europe). Had to move to the suburbs because having a big dog in the city centre is quite difficult. Sold our small flat and bought a huge one in the suburbs. Now I'm definitely happy. It's quiet, airis clean (well, at least cleaner than in the city centre), no cars at night, no heavy trucks at all. At night the only thing I can hear is crickets somewhere in the nearby field. I have to go to the city almost every day (work and stuff) so buying food on the way is not a problem. Bus is once an hour but that's enough for me. Also, we have a car which is useful in winter.

I'll give you a slightly different perspective than some of the Americans commenting about their suburbia.

I think suburbia in Australia is a different beast, I live in the suburbs of Sydney, and I have to say, growing up it was pretty awesome. I had a life with a huge backyard, a swimming pool. I could ride my bike all around the streets without running into traffic. All this, and the 'city' is only a train ride away, when you wanted something more than the local Westfield.

As a uni student, right now I would rather be living in the inner city, mostly for convenience reasons, but for somewhere to raise a family. The suburbs are pretty damn good.

It's fun to see the wildlife in your back yard while you eat breakfast or have Thanksgiving. It sucks that school, friends from school, and the places you like to meet up with friends are all at least a 20 minute drive away, especially if you don't have a car. There are few foreign-born people around. There are few black people around. Most everyone you encounter is from a similar socio-economic background as you. People claim to value "privacy" but you can still see the neighbor playing tennis against the garage, and hear the snowblower going next door. It is quiet, especially at night.

I've lived in cities and suburbs. The suburb I lived in was not like the others described here. No chain stores or restaurants, just everything was incredibly expensive. Like 30% more for everything. There was no real public transportation (except Metro North into the city and a small local bus service). The biggest thing was you needed a car so going out wasn't that fun.

Well, I live in the Northeast of the USA, so my experiences are probably different from what things are like in Australia, but here's my experience.

I live on about a 1 acre lot, in a unplanned neighborhood (No homeowners association, lot sizes and houses are whatever people want to build.)

What's great about it:

It's very quiet compared to a city, my neighbors are close enough to see, but not close enough to really hear unless it's a big party/lawn mower.

I have ROOM! I have space to work on projects, like fixing a car, building something, etc. I also have plenty of space in my house for whatever I want in it (Home theater, office, library, etc.) as opposed to being in a (typically) much smaller apartment in a city.

It's much easier for outdoor pursuits here. I can bike for miles without much trouble with traffic, and there are huge parks/preserves nearby for hiking, mountain biking, kayaking and such.

It's comfortable. Everything I need is available at a store within a 10 minute drive, it's rare for any sirens or major events to be happening.

What sucks:

While you can walk forever, there is nowhere to reasonably walk to. The only things within a 15 minute walk are a sandwich shop and a convenience store, and most people don't even have that. Roads and traffic patterns are also not designed with anything but driving in mind.

There is not a great deal to do. Outdoor pursuits, yes. But in terms of bars, clubs, events, concerts, it's unlikely that there will be much nearby.

What I'd prefer: I like the base suburban concept. I like living in a single-family house, it's much nicer than apartments/condos/townhouses, and I like having more nature around me. However, I want to be in a place with more things to do nearby that interest me. I'd like a job and a house up in the mountains near a ski area.

In my youth, I spent a year living in the suburbs. Today, I'd rather live in the most run-down, beat-up, rat-infested, stinking pit of a house in the hill country than anywhere near the suburbs.

Sure, it's clean, it's orderly, it's sanitary... But it's like a cell block. Every house looks almost exactly the same. There are no trees, except for the tiny, pathetic saplings that are pre-planted. Nobody's ever walking around outside because everyone has air-conditioned SUVs. There are no coffee shops, restaurants, or stores; as far as the eye can see, there are only more identical houses.