Jun 30, 2016

I've blogged a couple of times recently about my relationship to my body now post-pregnancy. Click here & here to read if you like, but the bottom line is that going through my first pregnancy taught me to appreciate my body in a whole new way. I am now in complete awe of what a body can do, and so thankful that is was able to give me my son, Charlie! You'll never hear me say a mean thing about my body again, no matter what changes and "flaws" may come my way. When I gave birth, I was reborn as my truest self. I've never felt more at home in my own skin, or more me. Becoming Charlie's mom brought out a strength I never knew I had.

I love documenting my life through photos, especially during periods of great transformation. Three months to the day since giving birth I did a photoshoot for BraBar Boutique (find them on Facebook & Instagram). BraBar has lingerie unlike anywhere else in the state. While they have multiple brands (and even swimwear and clothing) they are best known for carrying the stunning bras and patnies by designer Marlies Dekkers. I'd never seen bras this pretty and unique until my first trip in to BraBar! They pride themselves on getting you in truly the right fit as well. The boutique is intimate, beautifully decorated, and the employees provide you with a luxurious experience. There's no surprise that the personal feel at BraBar is preferred over a chain or department store by their devoted clients.

I've modeled boudoir and pinup countless times through the years, but this shoot was different. I was now a new version of myself. The mom version! We wanted the shoot to be a celebration of the post-baby body. We wanted sexy but classy, and to show you absolutely can still be sexy post-baby! We shot in the most beautiful light pink bra & panty set. I thought we might have to try several things on to make sure it was the fit, and look we were going for (I'm certainly not the bra size I was before which has taken some getting used to), but stylist Mimi of Pink Speak nailed it on the first try. We added timeless jewelry and floral robes for our celebratory shoot.

Cat Palmer was the photographer on our shoot (find her gorgeous work here). When the shoot started coming together, I knew there was no photographer more perfect for this collaboration. I've worked with Cat over the years, and we've gotten to be close friends. I knew I'd be comfortable in front of her camera in my new body. I knew she'd make me look and feel great, since celebrating the female body is her area of expertise. She's built herself an extremely successful business by empowering women through her art. I knew she'd be encouraging of embracing the new me.

I felt great in BraBar's lingerie. It's so high quality, which means it fits extremely well. It was beautiful and it made me feel beautiful, sexy, strong, and like myself.

The photos capture me at my most authentic.Me as a mother. Me at home in my skin. Me fully present. Me full of more love than I've ever been in my life.

Jun 29, 2016

This is where we are today. I've been fascinated by the female human body like never before since going through pregnancy. I post this because of my fascination, and to keep track of my own progress.

I have experienced my body every which way now. After birth I felt completely different than I expected to. I felt small, fragile, but also more fully in my body than ever before. I remember stretching out in bed at night those first few weeks and feeling so aware of every inch of me. Down to the tips of my toes I so fully inhabited this human form. I felt absolutely brand new.

Over the weeks the fragility began to transform to strength, and the initial magic and newness of my rebirth has worn off.

Now I feel like "me" again, but an enhanced version. I am very near what I looked like before I was ever pregnant, but with a new patience and awe for my body. Believe me, it's not without new flaws, but that doesn't bother me like it would have before.

I'm too thankful for it for giving me my baby now to ever be mad at it, and too curious to see what transformations are in store for both from here and through the years to be too tied to any one idea of what it "should" look like. Changes are good. Changes are great.

Whatever it is at the moment, it now houses me at my most authentic self. Me at my most present. Me at my most grounded. Me full of a newfound consuming love.

Jun 5, 2016

Over the last couple of years I've been invited to events at Rodizio Grilland I always jump at the chance. That may seem crazy if you know me and know that I'm more or less a vegetarian. As far as meat goes I only eat chicken and turkey, and not very often. When you think of Rodizio you think of meat. This Brazilian Steakhouse is known for their meats. Beef, poultry, pork, lamb, you name it and they keep it coming. The servers keep them circling back to your table on large skewers. They look amazing, and I hear that they are, but I love to go for their salad bar.

The salad bar is huge. Multiple salads from caesar to pasta, and hot food as well. There's rice, different kinds of beans, and mashed potatoes. There's gazpacho, rolls, and corn bread. I took my vegetarian husband for the second time and he loved it, too.

And the desert. Well, that just might be my favorite part. I finally branched out from my usual (their cinnamon pastry) for the chocolate cake. It was just as tasty.

I love this place, and the cozy Trolley Square location. We got to go last week to try out their new summer menu, and to help them kick it off I am giving away two full rodizio meals! To enter, leave a comment telling me you'd like to go, and who you'd like to take with you! One comment per person. Comment below or on my Facebook page where I'll also post this link. Winner chosen at random and announced here on this post & on Facebook SATURDAY, June 11!

Deena Marie Manzanares

Actor | TV Host | Model |

Hello!

Thanks for stopping by! I'm Deena Marie Manzanares, a professional actor, model, and tv host. I'm a member of Actors Equity Association, and represented by Talent Management Group. I am a freelance host, and reporter on various local tv stations, and an on camera reporter for Stringham Schools. I'm brand ambassador for businesses Got Beauty, Pro Do, and Pink Blush. Over the years I created a large social media following thanks to becoming a YouTube Partner on my channels BeanerLaRue & TheDeenaShow. I'm a single mama to my sweet boy, Charlie. He is the brightest spot in my life. Welcome to my blog, this is the place where I pour my heart out.

Words to live by:

If there's only one nation in the sky, shouldn't all passports be valid for it?

-Yann Martel, Life of Pi

Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it's a profound source of spirituality.