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Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Predictions

Never let it be said that your perceptive Pedant-General is behind the curve.

No sooner do I lay down the law on childcare, than I find, by some miraculous twist of spacetime, this, brought back to the present day from the year 2056. Even more extraordinarily, it seems that the sober and careful lifestyle advocated by your fine and upstanding Pedant-General will still be holding true 51 years from now.

Under strict international laws, you are forbidden from procreating in the hopes of rescuing a troubled marriage. However, there are no laws restricting the adoption of mutants.

Well, apart from the bit about mutants, maybe.

While it's a common myth that happily married couples read each other's minds, the reality is that happily married partners only use telepathy for the stock market and crime prevention.

How uncannily like Lady P-G, I hear you cry!

One final piece of invaluable advice:

Generations of married couples have relied on this age-old advice for maintaining a happy marriage: Never go into suspended animation angry.