XXL Presents…The 100 Greatest Kanye West Quotes

Regardless of what the medium may be, (interviews, Tweets, acceptance speeches, other people's acceptance speeches) Kanye West has always got something interesting to say. As one of the most polarizing figures in all of music, Kanye's words range from the hilarious, to the offensive, to the inspiring. Most importantly, they're certainly always entertaining. <i>XXL</i> scoured through the Louis Vuitton Don's best interviews, speeches, blog posts, and tweets to compile a list of his finest words, so enjoy as <i>XXL</i> Presents... The 100 Greatest Kanye West Quotes &#8212 <i>XXL Staff</i>

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"Well, I think I do around the same amount of work as a Rock artist or something, but they just have other people right next to them so they don't get as much credit. So I just had like all of my band like kind of sit down in the pit so I can get all the shine."

&#8212 The Ellen Degeneres Show (October 2008)

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"Boyfriends are like rush hour traffic... ALWAYS IN THE FUCKING WAY!"

—@kanyewest (February 2011)

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"Never do coke with an intern ... they may not be 21 LOL"

—@kanyewest (November 2010)

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"Sometimes I fuk with my Timbs on"

—@kanyewest (February 2011)

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"I don't even listen to rap. My apartment is too nice to listen to rap in."

&#8212 DJ Semtex interview (2008)

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"You can't take anything away from me if I have that ego. It's part of the whole ambiance, so just enjoy the ride."

— Complex interview (June 2004)

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"If you're driving a car and you're trying to get in another lane, you're looking for your opportunity to get in this lane, right? My goal is to be on the freeway in a fucking plane. In all lanes at all times. The goal is not to cross over, the goal is to try to do the impossible. Like, for me to have a party at the Louis Vuitton store and then get in the car and hear Kay Slay playing 'Can't Tell Me Nothing' was the greatest accomplishment for me. That was like the airplane thing. In all lanes."

— Complex interview (August 2007)

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"Tell everyone at the label only use Gothic or Helvetic fonts for email blast unless I otherwise approve"

"I don't want to see any movie that doesn't have mind blowing special effects… #EverAGAIN"

&#8212@kanyewest (December 2011)

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"I could never do stand up cause I tell jokes better when im sitting"

&#8212@kanyewest (January 2011)

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“If I don’t win, the award show loses credibility.”

&#8212 MTV Europe Music Awards (2006)

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"Sometimes people write novels and they just be so wordy and so self-absorbed…I am not a fan of books. I would never want a book’s autograph. I am a proud non-reader of books."

&#8212 Reuters Interview (May 2009)

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"It's the best hotel I ever stayed in. That sh*t was crazy. You just lay out on the beach, but what was dope about it was they'd bring you popsicles and stuff."

&#8212Rolling Stone (December 2004)

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"I have decided to become the best rapper of all time! I put it on my things to do in this lifetime list!"

&#8212@kanyewest (October 2010)

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"Hate when I'm on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle"

&#8212@kanyewest (October 2010)

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"When I visited Wayne at Rikers Island, I had a suit on with some slippers, and the guard said, “Man, those shoes are amazing.” And I said, “Yes, they are. I’m Kanye West.”

&#8212 XXL (October 2010)

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“We’ve come to know celebrities as assholes sometimes. And I’m just the most blaring one, the pinnacle of it.”

&#8212 XXL (October 2010)

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"I am one with the people, and as I change, the people change with me. I am one of the faces of the zeitgest. I’m one of the few celebrities that are on the same wave of consciousness as all the behind the scenes journalists, photographers, stylists, publicists, filmmakers, poets, painters, graphics artists and so on. I am the voice of the dreamers. I am the creative dream come true and I refuse to wake up”

&#8212 XXL (October 2010)

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“If you don’t like something, it’s bad. If you hate something, it’s ass. But when you love it, it’s badass!”

&#8212 XXL (October 2010)

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"In America, they want you to accomplish these great feats, to pull off these David Copperfield-type stunts. You want me to be great, but you don't ever want me to say I'm great?"

&#8212 Rolling Stone interview (February 2006)

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"I'm like a tree, I feed the branches of the people."

&#8212 The Daily Mirror (October 2010)

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“I promised I wouldn’t tear up… but have you heard of a little thing called Lindsay Lohan’s Ungaro collection? That was like the 9/11 of fashion. It was game over for me after that as no one would take a celebrity trying to do fashion seriously.”

&#8212 The Daily Mirror (October 2010)

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"I'm a pop enigma. I live and breathe every element in life. I rock a bespoke suit and I go to Harold's for fried chicken. It's all these things at once, because, as a tastemaker, I find the best of everything. There's certain things that black people are the best at and certain things that white people are the best at. Whatever we as black people are the best at, I'm a go get that. Like, on Christmas I don't want any food that tastes white. And when I go to purchase a house, I don't want my credit to look black."

&#8212 SPIN Magazine (January 2008)

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"Yo, how am I supposed to talk if you're going to run the thing in the middle while I'm talking? "Please don't let that happen again. It's ridiculous."

&#8212 The Today Show (November 2010)

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"I want you to document this right here, what I'm saying right now. I am the number one human being in music. That means any person that's living or breathing is number two. Because I'm number one now.… You are in the presence of the champion. Bow in the presence of greatness.…”

&#8212 The Wendy Williams Show (2007)

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"Fur pillows are hard to actually sleep on"

&#8212@kanyewest (August 2010)

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"I think I might have a problem, a sexual addiction. I have porn on me at all times"

&#8212 Playboy (March 2006)

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“They won’t let real artists be artists. They want some commercialized yes-men sitting in their motherfucking seat, letting the bullshit go down year after year after year"

&#8212 Milwaukee Summerfest (July 2011)

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"If I was more complacent and I let things slide, my life would be easier, but you all wouldn't be as entertained. My misery is your pleasure.

&#8212 Rolling Stone interview (February 2006)

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"Once again I wake up, and I’m a monster. I walk through the hotel, or I walk down the street, and people look at me like I’m fucking insane—like I’m Hitler.”

&#8212 Big Chill Music Festival (August 2011)

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"I’m like a machine. I’m a robot. You cannot offend a robot. Mentally, I’m so focused theres nothing somebody could say or do to me to stop the music, the product that I’m gonna put out."

&#8212 Tim Westwood interview (August 2007)

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"'I have so much to stunt about that it baffles me"

&#8212kanyeuniversecity.com (January 2009)

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"So I asked myself this question, and you can ask yourself the same: Who do you know with two thumbs and his own Louis shoe? This guy!"

&#8212kanyeuniversecity.com (January 2009)

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"Due to what has happened so severely when the red shoes hit the runway, I was forced to change my name to Martin Louis the King Jr. Address me as such."

&#8212kanyeuniversecity.com (January 2009)

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“I feel belittled to be classified as just a musician”

&#8212 XXL interview (October 2010)

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"Do you know where to find marble conference tables? I'm looking to have a conference... not until I get the table though."

&#8212@kanyewest (August 2010)

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"My favorite unit of measurement is a shit load'"

&#8212@kanyewest (September 2010)

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"Sometimes I push the door close button on people running towards the elevator. I just need my own elevator sometimes, my 7 floor sanctuary"

&#8212@kanyewest (August 2010)

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"Man ... ninjas are kind of cool ... I just don't know any personally"

&#8212@kanyewest (September 2010)

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"I wasn’t put on this earth to make money – I was put on this earth to make magic."

&#8212 Clash Magazine (April 2008)

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"You basically can say anything to someone on an email or text as long as you put LOL at the end."

&#8212@kanyewest (September 2010)

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"At the crib I use really nice napkins instead of paper towels … got the idea from the YSL bathroom … waaaaay nicer"

&#8212@kanyewest (September 2010)

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"So Nirvana can have a naked human being on they cover but I can’t have a PAINTING of a monster with no arms and a polka dot tail and wings"

&#8212@kanyewest (October 2010)

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"What’s better for devil worshipping Iphone or the Droid … Does lucifer return text … is he or she on Skype? Don’t wanna be sexist."

&#8212@kanyewest (October 2010)

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"THE ‘PORTRAIT OF POWER’ PREMIERS THIS THURSDAY ON MTV RIGHT AFTER JERSEY SHORE…IT’S NOT A VIDEO… IT’S A PAINTING!!!"

&#8212@kanyewest (August 2010)

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"If you have the opportunity to play this game of life you need to appreciate every moment. A lot of people don`t appreciate the moment until it’s passed."

&#821247th Grammy Awards (February 2005)

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“I could design something for Obama to go to the club in. But I don’t know if I’m ready for suits and stuff”

&#8212 The Sun interview (2008)

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"I hate khaki cargo shorts"

&#8212@kanyewest (May 2012)

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"PLEASE I BEG YOU, GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET ME BE GREAT!!! WHO HAVE I HURT SO BAD THAT THEY WANT TO DESTROY ME? WHO HAVE I EVER SPOKE ABOUT SO NEGATIVELY? I JUST WAS SPEAKING WITH OUR NEW PRESIDENT TWO DAYS AGO… AND NOW THIS…."

&#8212 kanyeuniversecity.com (January 2009)

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"I hate when people email you and ask “You wanna know something?” of course but why are u torturing me by spreading this to more than 1 email"

&#8212 @kanyewest (August 2010)

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"I am number one right now. I want you to look at this camera. I have not taken any drugs. I’ve dranken a little bit but even if I wasn’t drinking I would’ve told u the same thing"

&#8212 The Wendy Williams Show (September 2007)

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"What's a B+ mean?" "I'm an extremist, its either pass or fail! A+ or F-! You know what, fuck you and the whole fucking staff!"