NEW WORLD DISORDER

A great play for production at colleges, universities and reeeeally intrepid high schools, NEW WORLD DISORDER imagines a future in which a paranoid, maniacal man has convinced people to cut themselves off from each other in every way but digitally and live sequestered in underground boxes. But the new generation is restless and yearning and ready to start a revolution.

(Lights up on Jake, a health teacher. A bloop-
bloop sound and Linksley announce the addition
of his last student to the e-class.)

LINKSLEY
Keith 848 has joined the e-class.

JAKE
Late as usual. Okay, we’re all here. Let’s—
(squinting at something on his screen)
Cute, Keith. A pretty good likeness. Except my teeth aren’t nearly that pointy. Take that down, please. And let’s get started with the lesson.

So penises. We all have them. Except the fems. They have something else on the inside called… ovaries. That’s where they keep the eggs that humans grow out of. During collection season, the repro-bots go and collect eggs from the fems when they’re ready. And they take those eggs to the Incubox to be mixed with something called sperm. That’s what the repro-bots come to collect from us. The sperm. It’s in that gooey stuff that comes out when we rub our penises. Kind of like what Keith is absentmindedly doing right now. Put it away Keith. It’s hard to pay attention if you’re yanking one out.

But no mispressions, okay? Yanking is a good thing. A natural thing. It just makes you momentarily stupid. Because in the moment, it’s the only thing that matters. Stirring up the baby juice. And that makes sense because it’s the most important purpose we can pursue: producing sperm to join with the fems’ eggs to hatch more humans. To make more humans is to live forever, to be apart of something bigger than yourself…
(He stops and reflects on that for a moment.)
And there’s honor in that, right? Right.