18 signs you might be a flow junkie, infinite player or orgasm enthusiast 1. You’re pretty sure that the word “moderation” is Ukranian or something, regardless you have no idea what it means You are immersive beyond repair. You can’t just dabble like other people and then leave well enough alone. You don’t make a little iMovie, you take on a whole documentary project. If you try a new religion, you decide you have to become a priest. Yes, you can become addictive. The same mind whose curiosity gets piqued with Egyptian temples and is soon reading everything it can get its hands on, collecting odd artifacts, implements and errata, also becomes equally fascinated with, shall we say, less savory endeavors. 2. What others call loneliness or isolation you call opportunity You can get lost indefinitely in what others would consider day dreaming. In fact, you probably have some grade...

In college I was faced with what I perceived to be a dilemma. I was something of a golden child. I had a certain gift that made me a favorite with professors, so much so that I was the first paid graduate teaching associate in my department. I was on the fast track for the position I wanted and a strong candidate for a fairly elite Phd program. The professor with the most “pull” was incredibly learned in his field. Everyone wanted to work with him and I was one of three “chosen ones.” I basked in the glories of recognition. I garnered all of the benefits. There was this one itty bitty issue. He was something of a racist and a homophobe. And I was in love with, living with, being deeply and wildly emotionally supported by a woman of mixed race. I can say with confidence that she...

“If you love me fuck me like you hate me” Anonymous Because I’ve lived a greater portion of my life off the rails, I use Facebook as a barometer of normalcy as in, “Oh yes, this is how normal people see the world.” Like an archeologist discovering a great treasure, I am delighted to uncover this little gem from a Facebook friend: I’ve encountered my share of “off” OKC messages. But this… is the best yet! His profile opens: “I use to deal drugs but it finally got boring.” (There are pictures of him with expensive cars). His invite to me: Dinner at French Laundry or Sierra Mar. His treat. He’ll pick me up. Yeah… like I’m going to get in a car with a *stranger* and go all the way to NAPA or BIG SUR. I don’t think so!! I don’t care if it is the finest of fine...

Recently I was reading an article about male-female dynamics that said the number one complaint women have about men is that all guys want is sex. The number two complaint is that he doesn’t even know what he’s doing once he gets there. The man’s number one complaint, for his part, was that women make everything so difficult. I loved this. Not because I am a fan of the war of the sexes (if there is such a thing) but becauseit points toward something so much bigger. If we pull back the lens, these very day-to-day complaints start looking like clues in the mysterious game that I like to call “Masculine/Feminine.” Part of me cringes to use those terms. They have been co-opted by a whole lot of people who use them a whole lot differently than I do. So let me be clear. Masculine/Feminine is not a synonym for...

Posted on 2 February 2014 | 3:05 am

To awaken. Ourselves and others. To start fires. To ignite. To catalyze. Turned-on women are changing the world. Your presence is requested.