Best of Late Night TV: Conan's Clueless Gamer Team Edition, Worst First Textual Experience

If you're like us and value your sleep, you probably nodded off into your Ambien dreamland before the party started on post-prime time TV. Don't worry; we've got you covered. Here's the best of what happened last night on late night.

Silicon Valley," and they played "Halo 5: Guardians." Prepare for 9 minutes of hilarity. "I don't see anybody! I'm like my father at night looking for Fig Newtons. I'm just wandering around." Poor Conan.

This will make you LOL too. Aziz Ansari was on "The Tonight Show" to promote his book, "Modern Romance: An Investigation," and he and Jimmy Fallon chatted about embarrassing first text messages between guys and girls. Aziz said most dudes just send stupid things, and they shared proof when reading off viewer-submitted worst first texts in a new segment called "First Textual Experience." It's hard to believe that some of these are real, but Jimmy said they're all 100 percent. The "HORROR"! "Jimmy Kimmel Live" had a repeat Monday night, but on Sunday Jimmy hosted the cast of "Magic Mike XXL" on Game Night, so let's just review that magic. Jimmy reminded everyone that their porn name is their pet and the street they grew up on, so Channing Tatum, Matt Bomer, Joe Manganiello, Kevin Nash, and Adam Rodriguez revealed their names. Matt said his porn name, Dixie Eunice, is going to be the name of their next film, "starring Caitlyn Jenner and I." The crowd loved it -- and said they would watch that movie. Laura Prepon was on "Late Night with Seth Meyers" Monday night and said they started filming "Orange Is the New Black" Season 4 that day. Woo hoo! Since Season 3 was just released, Laura caught fans up on the status of her character, Alex, up to that point and gave some Season 3 teases. Laura also shared photos of fans' tattoos, inspired by her and her character. Martha Stewart was also on Seth's show and you should listen to her talk about her stint on Justin Bieber's roast. She said she got high just sitting next to Snoop Dogg, from the secondary smoke. Melora Hardin, Amy Landecker, and Jack Antonoff were on "The Late Late Show with James Corden," and even if you have no clue who those people are, they had a good time. Amy and Melora discussed the lesbian scenes in their show "Transparent." Apparently one of them crossed the line with the other with a certain move. Jack just sat there taking it all in. This is adorable, though. James Corden and Jack Antonoff -- of the band fun. -- sat down with 11-year-old Owen Roberts, writer of the song "Magic Pancakes," for a "Behind the Music" segment. "Is it actually a song about the American election?" "No, I just really like pancakes." Then they performed the song in a big debut, along with Reggie Watts and the "Late Late Show" band. It's a pretty good jam! And now we want pancakes. Just to end on a depressing note, James tackled the concept of spoilers and discussed the death (for now) of Jon Snow on "Game of Thrones." He thinks we're all crazy to get upset. "The show's about dragons and incest. Like, who thought it was going to end well?"