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Squudge on "COMMUTERS BEG UNIONS TO EXTEND TUBE STRIKE"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=71507#post-210187
Wed, 05 Feb 2014 10:57:43 +0000Squudge210187@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Bravo
</p>Spartacus on "COMMUTERS BEG UNIONS TO EXTEND TUBE STRIKE"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=71507#post-210181
Wed, 05 Feb 2014 10:27:38 +0000Spartacus210181@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Very excellent
</p>ゴルゴ１３ on "COMMUTERS BEG UNIONS TO EXTEND TUBE STRIKE"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=71507#post-210178
Wed, 05 Feb 2014 10:13:37 +0000ゴルゴ１３210178@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Excellent.
</p>Peter749400 on "COMMUTERS BEG UNIONS TO EXTEND TUBE STRIKE"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=71507#post-210161
Wed, 05 Feb 2014 00:50:38 +0000Peter749400210161@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p></p>
<p>London commuters begged London transport unions tonight to extend the current 48 hour tube strike indefinitely, citing "an immeasurable improvement to our quality of life and general well-being" since suspension of services began.</p>
<p>"Please, stop holding London to ransom by threatening to resume services tomorrow morning" said a spokesman for the London Commuters Group; "give us a few more days of freedom from these fetid caskets of lurching hopelessness. We can get the bus and see the sights, or we can walk - nay, skip - to work and be all the happier for it. Are men, like ants, born to creep through narrow tunnels the day long, our limbs cramped and contorted and our noses filled with the stench of armpit? No! Let us breathe the intoxicating fresh air and bask in the fortifying sunshine, and break these shackles forever!"</p>
<p>One commuter commented: "I saw the sun-set for the first time in 5 years when I walked home from work today. So many colours. I feel alive again". </p>
<p>"I saw a chaffinch in the park when I walked to work", added another. "Normally I only see sparrows on the northern line."</p>
<p>However, bosses across London reported worrying levels of exuberance among some workers. "They'd better call this strike off pronto" said Dave Bigshot from one major employer. "All my staff are coming in bringing acorns they've found in the park or sharing photos taken from the top decks of buses. I need my workforce crushed, fearful and despondent, and the tube is a very important element of that."
</p>Vertically Challenged Giant on "VW turns off Blackberry emails out of hours"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=36677#post-102816
Mon, 26 Dec 2011 20:07:41 +0000Vertically Challenged Giant102816@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Nice
</p>brian on "VW turns off Blackberry emails out of hours"http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/topic.php?id=36677#post-102799
Mon, 26 Dec 2011 13:55:37 +0000brian102799@http://newsbiscuit.com/forum/<p>Volkswagen has agreed to stop its Blackberry servers sending emails to some of its employees when they are off-shift.</p>
<p>The carmaker confirmed it made the move earlier this year following complaints that staff's work and home lives were becoming blurred.</p>
<p>The restriction covers employees in Germany working under trade union negotiated contracts.</p>
<p></p>
<p>A spokesman for VW explained that worker's motivation was of paramount importance to the company. It had taken lessons from history, especially from Chairman Mao in China that showed that a happy worker was a productive worker. The Blackberry emails were simply the 21st Century equivalent of Mao's Red Book, disseminating the thoughts of VW's Chairman.</p>
<p>A message received at bedtime would send the worker off to sleep pleased with his day's work at the factory. A message upon wakening would put him in a positive frame of mind for a productive day ahead.</p>
<p>VW's Chairman had listened to the Worker's Council and agreed to this temporary ban but warned that this was only a temporary respite to allow time for VW to come up with a new system of worker motivation. It is thought that this would involve replacing the Blackberries with tiny chip implants and retinal projectors, allowing workers to benefit from motivational readings from the VW Chairman 24/7.</p>
<p>A Council spokesman responded that he would vote in favour and recommend the workers acceptance and then retire to the countryside mansion so kindly provided by VW for him and his family.
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