So watching the NCAA tournament on CBS, TNT and TBS and they keep pimping Bleacher Report who is apparently one of their sponsors. I figure if the worst sports website on the internet can sponsor such a huge event that its time for Mark (Rockhawk) to pony up some cash and get us a .Net Super Bowl commercial.

We got to spit ball some idea's. What you got?

I'm thinking something emotional, loving and sappy. Various .net members hanging out in the Seahawks locker room describing what they love about certain players. Then leaving "Go Hawks!" stickie notes on their lockers.

Or, we could have various members simulate a Seahawks game. Pehawk, as the board midget, would have to play Russell Wilson. Tech worlds could wear his 79 jersey. AKSeahawkfan could return to play the role of Jim Harbaugh, since they're both pretty cranky. The rest of us could be in the stands making meaninless, dumbass comments about the play on the field, you know, playing our usual role.

Zeb squeezes into the elevator, giving off that normal creepy vibe only Zeb can. All the others move towards the elevator walls, to give Zeb more room. At this point Zeb starts licking the left cheek of EVERYONE in the elvator (face cheek, you pervs). Everyone stands there confused and saddened by Zebs sexual assault.

At this point the 3rd wall comes tumbling down, Zeb looks into the camera and says "can you guess what I had for breakfast, guys? Smell your faces, guess, c'mon!"

Enter theme music, the seahawks.net logo, then our motto flashes across the screen "Seahawks.net...now with more QB threads and less racism".

Zeb squeezes into the elevator, giving off that normal creepy vibe only Zeb can. All the others move towards the elevator walls, to give Zeb more room. At this point Zeb starts licking the left cheek of EVERYONE in the elvator (face cheek, you pervs). Everyone stands there confused and saddened by Zebs sexual assault.

At this point the 3rd wall comes tumbling down, Zeb looks into the camera and says "can you guess what I had for breakfast, guys? Smell your faces, guess, c'mon!"

Enter theme music, the seahawks.net logo, then our motto flashes across the screen "Seahawks.net...now with more QB threads and less racism".

Thoughts?

Thoughts?

I don't like it...... I LOVE IT!!! Just add Dr Diags holding the "less racism" sign and I'll bankmark this tomorrow. (Sac, please win that tourny, I need a loan)

No cdallan, let's keep this American. You'll add a British accent, which will lead people to believe its a political message supporting the current case OUR supreme court is hearing. No offense, but all Euro accents sound pro gay marriage.

While I support you guys, this isn't the forum.

Now, if you want to add Les yelling at Rock for using the wrong elevator, fine. Something like "rock, that elevators for 3rd floor tenants, and technically you sublease a room on the 3rd floor. So, hit the stairs, Stupid!"

pehawk wrote:Now, if you want to add Les yelling at Rock for using the wrong elevator, fine. Something like "rock, that elevators for 3rd floor tenants, and technically you sublease a room on the 3rd floor. So, hit the stairs, Stupid!"

Right? Or instead of just telling you to hit the stairs he says, "Rock, check your PM's, top left corner of your welcome mat"

pehawk wrote:Now, if you want to add Les yelling at Rock for using the wrong elevator, fine. Something like "rock, that elevators for 3rd floor tenants, and technically you sublease a room on the 3rd floor. So, hit the stairs, Stupid!"

Right? Or instead of just telling you to hit the stairs he says, "Rock, check your PM's, top left corner of your welcome mat"

Far to difficult of a prima-donna ego to work with. Plus, the craft services bill with his huge posse would eat up half the budget.

Hey again! I have a rather broad Scottish accent. Imagine James McAvoy's big brother who didn't win a place at a fancy school. It sounds pro-hardening your arteries with saturated fat and using the c-word as a general descriptive term, and anti-everything else.

cdallan wrote:Hey again! I have a rather broad Scottish accent. Imagine James McAvoy's big brother who didn't win a place at a fancy school. It sounds pro-hardening your arteries with saturated fat and using the c-word as a general descriptive term, and anti-everything else.

You're in. But the first time I hear a "Mel Gibson" style Scottish accent, you're back to the curb.

cdallan wrote:Hey again! I have a rather broad Scottish accent. Imagine James McAvoy's big brother who didn't win a place at a fancy school. It sounds pro-hardening your arteries with saturated fat and using the c-word as a general descriptive term, and anti-everything else.

You're in. But the first time I hear a "Mel Gibson" style Scottish accent, you're back to the curb.

At the time, we all laughed at him and his accent in Braveheart, and said he'd never make a convincing Scotsman.

Zeb squeezes into the elevator, giving off that normal creepy vibe only Zeb can. All the others move towards the elevator walls, to give Zeb more room. At this point Zeb starts licking the left cheek of EVERYONE in the elvator (face cheek, you pervs). Everyone stands there confused and saddened by Zebs sexual assault.

At this point the 3rd wall comes tumbling down, Zeb looks into the camera and says "can you guess what I had for breakfast, guys? Smell your faces, guess, c'mon!"

Enter theme music, the seahawks.net logo, then our motto flashes across the screen "Seahawks.net...now with more QB threads and less racism".

Thoughts?

Thoughts?

OK, as everyone still seems to be taking the silkwood shower we all take after the sluice gate to Pehawk's sewer that he calls his mind is opened, I thought that I would revert on a couple of technical points.

Firstly, if Zeb speaks to the camera, isn't that breaking down the fourth wall? If you break down the third wall, then that just means you have a really flimsy set (which, given the Net server, I am not ruling out for this commercial).

Secondly, can we verify the alleged reduction in racism? I haven't noticed it.

So is the fact that Pehawk doesn't do anything lewd or offensive an inside joke for the rest of us or just an attempt to make the commercial somewhat marketable? I mean if he isn't 'being Pehawk' he really serves no purpose in the commercial, and as per the JS philosophy might as well be a cap casualty. You also don't have to worry about his ridiculous rider for 12 monkeys and a big horned ram in his dressing room prior to his performance. Something about 'prepping the pipes', whatever that means. I guess it helps with his voice, but he doesn't have a speaking role...