Shane Dottle, 17, who used to live at Triad House in Ewing, has since moved on and is now on his own. Triad House is the state's only group home for kids who are gay, lesbian and transgender, and one of three nationally.Saed Hindash/The Star-Ledger

TRENTON — Before Janelle turned 15, she was suspended from school, thrown out of her house by her parents, ran away from her foster home, and got arrested for shoplifting. The trajectory of this child’s troubled life is becoming more familiar to social workers like Jacquelyn Warr-Williams of Camden County who treated Janelle — a transgender child.

"This may seem like an extreme case, but it is common," Warr-Williams said. "Kids are coming out earlier."

Across the nation, at least 20 percent of homeless youth and 15 percent of those in juvenile detention centers are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender. One in three children were thrown out of their homes after coming out to their parents.

"So many of these kids are throwaway kids...thrown out of their homes and rejected by their families," said Robyn Gigl, who chairs the New Jersey State Bar Association’s Gay Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Rights Section, which co-sponsored the first conference on the issue Thursday in New Brunswick

Experts also said many homeless gay kids are more likely to get arrested for "survival crime" like prostitution, or punished in school for fighting off students who harass them.

"Their safety is always in jeopardy," said Debra Guston, an attorney in Glen Rock who represents GLBT kids in the juvenile justice system.

While social workers and child advocates say the state needs to do more to tackle a growing problem, New Jersey is ahead of the curve in one way. It has one of only three group homes for gay teenagers in the nation: Triad House in Ewing.

Shane Dottle, 17, who spent 13 months at Triad House and has been living in a supervised apartment since the summer, said though he was never physically bullied in school or in foster care, it felt like a safe haven. "I could be myself and I felt more welcomed here than the other places."

Messages of positive reinforcement decorates a wall in the game room at the Triad House in Ewing. Saed Hindash/The Star-Ledger

Dottle remains close with his aunt in Pennsylvania, who is his legal guardian, but credited Triad House for helping him build the skills he needed to take care of himself — cooking, cleaning, studying, as well as interacting with his peers.

"He was a problem child — we butted heads at first. He was into everybody’s business. But I can see he’s matured," said Linda Kidd, who welcomed Dottle back for a visit Wednesday night with a hug.

Mary Inzana, CEO and founder of the 12-bed Triad House and a panelist at the conference, called Shane "a survivor" who fared better than most kids. She said homeless gay kids face obstacles others don’t: Some state caseworkers and foster parents, she noted, believe they are called by God to work with troubled kids — and, citing religious reasons, cannot accept children who are not straight.

"Many kids in foster families have had to go back into the closet in order to fit in," she said. "Some of these kids have been bullied and harassed and staff looked the other way."

The social workers and child advocates agree that while Triad House distinguishes New Jersey on the subject, they say the courts, schools and the juvenile justice and child welfare systems often fall short in helping these kids.

Rutgers School of Social Work Professor Maria Paradiso said the system sometimes doesn’t recognize their special circumstances and is often "too punitive."

Experts at the conference said the state should keep track of children’s sexual orientation, and develop more programs that will build trust and self-esteem.

Shane Dottle, 17, who used to live at Triad House in Ewing, shares a laugh with Linda Kidd, a family support worker, during a visit back at the house.Saed Hindash/The Star-Ledger

Alison Blake, Commissioner of the state Department of Children and Families, said the state has improved training for workers and enlisted foster children to recommend better policies. There is an 800 number listing gay-friendly housing and social services. But she also asked for suggestions to improve the state’s approach.

Jane and James Clementi, the mother and brother of Tyler Clementi — the Rutgers University student who committed suicide in 2010 after his roommate used a webcam to spy on him while he was in a romantic encounter with a man in their dormitory — attended Thursday’s conference. The suicide sparked a national conversation on bullying and inspired a law requiring schools to set policies to punish children who harass others.

Jane Clementi, whose family created a foundation in her son’s name to promote suicide prevention and anti-bullying efforts, said it is time to "get the conversation started and make people aware of all the situations" that affect gay kids.

"I would hope this helps create more safe spaces at home, school and the juvenile justice system," she said.

Note: This article quoted a social worker who described "Janelle" as a former transgender client. The social worker has since clarified that in order to protect patient confidentiality, Janelle's story was a composite of several patients.