Monday, December 3, 2007

The first week of December is always sad to me when I come in to the office expecting to find the handful of blogs I have been reading daily during NaBloPoMo and – nothing. It’s like everyone says “I blogged all month and you want ANOTHER?” Makes me feel lonely.

I had my glucose tolerance test this morning, which wasn’t nearly as bad as I expected it to be. I think I expected - well, do you remember Children’s Triaminic Cough Syrup? How it was sickeningly sweet and kinda thick and orange and you could handle a spoonful, if you must, but to drink bottle of it… And yet, I had no issues whatsoever. Sure, it was sweet – like flat Sprite, almost (I had the lemon-lime flavor) – but it was certainly manageable. Unfortunately, my doctor’s office doesn’t do blood work anymore – they send everyone to a lab. I had to sit in a crowded lab waiting room with a bunch of older people who had forgotten to wear deodorant this morning. I read (I’m re-reading Scarlett: the Sequel to Gone With the Wind) and watched a little Live! With Regis and Kelly which they had on the TV in the waiting room. I’m pretty sure I passed, based on the fact that I felt fine even after fasting and drinking that stuff – so I’m less worried about that now, yay! I had some low activity yesterday with the baby, which worried me, but she made a showing every once in awhile and then started to go a little crazy at night, as I was settling down. I’ve also been feeling really run down in the last week or so, and have been worried about anemia. So I’m trying to eat more iron-rich foods and some extra Vitamin C (which helps your body process such things) and I think I’m feeling a little better today. (Though I did fall asleep again while Mr. Moose was in the shower this morning.)

I am officially in my third tirmester now and 7 months pregnant - that sounds so much better! I'm very excited to reach this point. I had my third trimester pedicure on Saturday with my mom and Mr. Moose began priming the walls in the nursery yesterday and is almost finished. Yay!

My buddy Nicole on the message board that I frequent went into labor yesterday, so I’m very excited to hear updates on her new baby girl. Congrats, Nicole!

Friday, November 30, 2007

Last night the neighbor behind us (they have 2 kids, teenagers) apparently let their children have their youth group over or something. In the evening I heard a bunch of teens singing praise choruses and whatever. No biggie.

When I went to bed at 9:30 they seemed to be doing a lesson or something – oddly, it sounded like they had a microphone (their backyard isn’t really that big, but whatever). It was distant enough – and only one voice – that I was still able to fall asleep.

I woke at 11:11pm for my first round of bathroom breaks. By this point, it sounded like a party. And basketball? The cranky, tired, pregnant woman in me considered calling the police – they were being awfully loud for after 11 at night, but I behaved and was tired enough that I was eventually able to fall asleep after rejecting the idea of getting dressed, walking over there and telling them to keep it down.

Who let’s their kids have that many people over on a school night? If they do it again, I will calmly complain to Maggie, the mom. I don’t have a problem with them having friends over, etc. but 11:30 at night when most people have to work the next morning is kind of ridiculous to be escalating the noise that’s been going on all night.

Mr. Moose is out of town and I hate that. He’s in Cleveland, OH at a training conference that he really shouldn’t have had to go to. He’s there with a female co-worker – and when that got mentioned to my dad he sort of gave me a weird look. I then felt the need to defend it – it wasn’t his decision, blah, blah. I’m not worried that anything will happen or anything – I know the woman, I more than trust him, etc. but it does look at least a little funny, so I don’t really know what else to say on that. He’s freezing his butt off since, in Florida, we don’t ever have cold enough weather to merit cold-weather clothes. I sent him with layers, a snow cap he bought last February in Indiana, a jacket and boots that are made for walking in ice and snow (that he also bought last time in IN). He had to buy gloves last night since he couldn’t find his.

My dad came over last night to do the grout on the tile in my kitchen (the backsplash – it’s done!). I brought up the subject of my going into labor and asked him if he wanted to know when I did or if he just wanted to know when it was over. He was very adamant that he wanted to know when and be aware, etc. I can’t picture him pacing the waiting room or anything, but it’s kinda nice to know that he wants to be involved. K says that he’s been getting really excited about the prospect lately – I can just never tell with him.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

It’s interesting reading parenting articles/opinions on the major things from sleeping to children’s toys lately, etc. I find that I do actually have fairly strong opinions on many things that parents do and I’m not even truly sure where they come from.

On sleeping – I’ve read several books that run the gamut, and I’ve read a few blogs that mention other things. I don’t like the idea of “the family bed” for a myriad of reasons, all of them my personal tastes and personality. I have no issue with someone else doing it if it works for them, but I don’t plan to try it with my own kid. One reason is a practical reason that, even though babies don’t take up much space, it already feels as if our bed is pretty crowded with just Mr. Moose and myself and another reason (that partially tacks onto that one) is that I KNOW I wouldn’t sleep well for fear of rolling onto the baby/smothering her with blankets and pillows, etc. We plan to have the bassinet/pack’n’play next to the bed for the first little while that we bring the baby home, and gradually move her to her room and crib over time. The long-term plan may or may not work, but that’s where I’m starting.

Eating – I’ve mentioned before the distress I feel when I hear other mom’s talking about nursing their 4-year-olds. This disturbs me to no end, though I suppose there is a chance that I might change my mind once I really know what to expect from nursing, but somehow I doubt it.

CIO/FIO – It’s interesting to hear the opinions on this from the internet. I was always told that a baby shouldn’t be picked up the moment that she fusses even a bit so she doesn’t learn to expect that treatment when it’s not practical (like when you’re in the car during rush hour with no way to pull over right away, etc.), but I also know that I could never handle hearing my nephew cry for very long, so I can only imagine what it will do to my heart to hear my own baby crying from frustration if I am trying the CIO theory. So, probably not. (I know to never say never in these situations). I like what The Baby Whisperer suggests which is to pick up the baby when she cries, but as soon as she settles, to put her back down in her crib (in a “it’s time to sleep” situation) and continue to pick her up each time she begins to cry again, but to immediately put her down when she settles. She says that it may take awhile – 30 times in a night the first night, and usually decreasing times in subsequent nights – but that eventually she will learn that you will always come when needed, and there is no reason to fret. But it might not work, and I’m prepared to adjust if necessary.

Lately, I’ve been having more anxiety over impending labor – we went to our first childbirthing class the other night and I watched a video. I turned to Mr. Moose afterwards and said “do you seriously think I can do that?” He assured me that I could, but I am doubtful. I want to go into labor naturally, if possible, but I’m scared of laboring at home for very long, and yet don’t want to be sent home because it’s too early. I’d be willing to schedule an induction, but I’ve heard that inductions usually make it worse and so I don’t want to deal with that, either. I also want this baby out as soon as possible, safely. I don’t want to be one of those moms who is still waiting 2 weeks after her due date. I don’t know that I can handle emotionally or physically a long 20-hour labor. I know they say that you can handle anything is necessary, but I just cannot picture myself going through all that and not begging for a c-section by hour #8. I’ll be labeled “that wussy mom in room 208”, but I really won’t care. Seriously, though. I know when I first got pregnant and read in my books on pregnancy about labor that I was intimidated. Isn’t everyone? But I think I’m more freaked out the closer I get to the point where I’m actually going to have to go through it. For awhile the idea of stretching that far out creeped me out – now it’s less about that, and more about the ability to actually deal with labor and physically be capable of pushing her out of my body. I have never been strong, ,or athletic or had much stamina for any physical activity – ever. So a long labor? I seriously think it would kill me. And I’m scared of the feelings of her crowning, of the possibility of ripping, etc. Okay, now I have to stop talking about this or I’m going to have a panic attack. And I’m at the office, so that’s not a good idea. ☺

Friday, November 23, 2007

My Thanksgiving was mostly good – Mr. Moose and I got into an argument in the morning while we were finishing the prep around the house and I realized how stressed I’d been feeling and overwhelmed, etc. Part of the problem is, I feel like I have no privacy right now – my dad has been coming over every day, somewhat unannounced, to work on the backsplash for the kitchen, Mr. Moose’s sister and BIL came into town on Tuesday and suddenly, our lives are not our own (they also showed up uninvited Wednesday night) and the house was still torn up and I wasn’t feeling well… you get the idea. He sent me to lay down at noon, not expecting guests until closer to 2 (which is when we asked people to show up, planning to eat at 3). Half an hour later, Mr. Moose woke me to let me know that his great aunt and uncle and grandmother had just pulled into the driveway. Oh boy. In my stupor I overheard something about a cat – his grandmother had brought her cat along in it’s carrier. Without asking or even telling us ahead of time. I like animals, don’t get me wrong, but most of his family is allergic to cats (though this is a Siamese, and therefore not nearly as problematic) and we have 2 very anti-cat dogs in our house (Buck moreso than Murphy, but still). I was ticked, but kept my mouth shut. She allowed us to put the cat in it’s carrier in the back room (the soon-to-be nursery, which I also didn’t like because I didn’t want to get dander and whatnot in the baby’s room – both of her parents have cat allergies, why borrow trouble?) but later, when she decided to take the cat out, she sat herself in the baby’s glider chair – the ONE piece of furniture in the house I have managed to keep completely dog-free. She kept him on her lap, wrapped in a towel (He’s still just a kitten and has limited manners, but if that cat had peed on her and gotten it on my chair, I would have been PISSED OFF).

The food was plentiful and yummy and it all worked out, despite my mismatched dishes (my knock-off china plates and plastic disposable cups – paper napkins left over from my wedding 2 years ago, etc.).

My exciting moment of the weekend, however, included the best garage sale find ever! My MIL and SIL, LB, went garage-saling on Saturday morning. They checked out some sales in a beach community (this often means people with serious money since between the waterfront – or close to it- property and the flood/hurricane insurance you have to have some serious $$ to live there) and found a travel system almost exactly like the one I have registered for (different print) which looked brand-spanking new. The lady claimed her daughter had only been in the infant carrier twice – and I believe her. It also came with an additional base and had nearly all the features I wanted (I still don’t like the main button that holds the 5-point harness together, but I CAN undo it, so I’m much less worried about it, even if I have to trim down my nails eventually to get it open easier). She was selling it for ½ what it goes for retail – so we saved approximately $100 on it AND my MIL offered to pay for it as a joint gift between her and her mother. The only ridiculously expensive item left on the registry is my breast pump (which is not one of those items that I even remotely expected as a gift – I’m simply hoping to get enough gift cards and cash cover it or something). On Sunday we even cleaned out my car enough and installed the carseat base and tested it with the carrier – it’s going to be a tight fit for the passenger seat, but it does, in fact, work, so I’m quite excited. The main thing we needed is here, in my house and I’m so thrilled.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

We tried a new church/Sunday School class over the weekend – it was a couples class at a conservative Baptist church that is right near our house. We had visited heir newlyweds class over a year ago and it didn’t fit us well. With our bible education backgrounds from our private school, light, surface teaching bores us. This class, while including young couples who were further along in their relationships/lives than us, seemed to be more up or alley.

I was relieved to hear the statement during the class that you are supposed to love your spouse more than you love your child – differently, of course, but the spouse more than your child, none-the-less. I had always believed that that was God’s purpose – you are supposed to love Him, your spouse, your children – in that order. I know I sometimes struggle with loving Mr. Moose more than I love God – but that’s a topic for a different post, I think. ☺ So much of what I’ve read lately implies or comes right out and says that your child should be first, etc. It relieved me to hear otherwise from the Bible.

I know I’m going to love Kremit – I already do in some ways and I know that when she is born and I hold her and look at her for the first time, that I will love her even more and my heart and hers will forever be linked. But I cannot imagine or comprehend loving her more than I love my husband. It’s foreign to me.

In pregnancy news, our little girl has been increasing her strength and activity of late and I feel her all the time these days. It’s fun and assuring, though there have been a few times when I have expected her to move and she doesn’t and I get panicked.

Our kitchen, as I mentioned, is basically done, minus the backsplash and flooring. I chose the backsplash tiles last night, and while they are very plain, I think it will look nice. It will also allow me to do pretty much anything I want with the flooring, so I will be choosing that hopefully soon to complete the overall project. I ended up going with my dad’s preferred tile, even though it wasn’t what I originally envisioned. I sometimes think I do that that too often – submit to his preferences just because I want to please him – but overall, I think it’s going to work out nicely. I can’t wait to have a room completely done – not looking for a final detail or waiting for more money until I can fix/replace/install whatever.

I keep looking around my house wondering what irrational thing I’ll want to fix when I go through my nesting period – I’ve noticed several little things and more bigger things. There is a missing bit of paint in the hallway – on the ceiling and a nick in the doorframe outside the baby’s room. We tore out the ugly black rubber baseboards in the living room after we painted the room overall, and we never finished patching/repainting them. I’m really wanting to replace the ugly cheap rug we stuck under the dining room table since between human and dog-related spills one end of it looks really nasty. I found a comparable rug at Target for $35 on sale, but because of the budget constraints, I haven’t bought it yet. I am totally disconcerted by the closet issues in the baby’s room and I really want to replace them. If my dad pays for the tile in the kitchen, we may be able to swing both that and the travel system (which is the bigger priority) from the money mom gave us to help with the kitchen.

Friday, November 16, 2007

The kitchen is nearly complete – there is a chance when I arrive at home tonight it will be done, but more likely tomorrow. This doesn’t include the floor or the backsplash, but at the least “have to for functionality” stuff is done. I’m having a blast picking out tile for the backsplash – but it’s much more difficult now that I don’t have a deadline hanging over me. Of course, I’d better hurry while my dad is still in project mode. ☺

I heard from my sister today that a close family friend just lost her baby at 19 weeks. I am devastated for her (as is she, naturally) and I am thanking God for the blessing of each kick and flutter today.

(UPDATE)I arrived home tonight to a sparkling new kitchen. There were some limitations put on the use of it for the evening (caulk was still drying), but it’s BEAUTIFUL! I am so psyched! Pictures to come! We’re going to look at tile for the backsplash this weekend with my dad and we need to determine which linoleum we’re going to put on the floor. I was originally thinking about the possibility of just leaving the terrazzo, but I decided that I really wanted the floor to look brand-new, as well and give the room that completed look. My mom will help me make a valance as soon as I pick out a fabric. I’m hoping to do that this weekend, as well – and I want DH to finally get the baby’s room primed!!! But the dishwasher is in, it looks great and they did a practice run to make sure everything was fine!!!

Monday, November 12, 2007

I was informed on Saturday afternoon that the demolition on my kitchen would begin on Wednesday and I needed to have the tile of the current backsplash removed and the entire contents of my kitchen packed by then (or, preferably sooner). We also have a house-full of company coming over on Tuesday night for dinner (which thankfully, will be being prepared elsewhere and BROUGHT to my house) and of course, priming the baby’s room has been back burnered – AGAIN.

Don’t get me wrong – I am thrilled about this new kitchen (did I mention this yet? It’s been a whirlwind. Nutshell: My dad has offered to remodel my current kitchen with certain stipulations for the next couple of years worth of Christmas and Birthday gifts. We were made the offer on Saturday, a week ago, had picked out the colors for cabinets and countertops by the next day and dad had a drawing done by the cabinet-maker by Sunday night. – Papa Moose does nothing halfway.), but all of a sudden, things got very overwhelming. There was a brief crying fest as I attempted to finalize my grocery list for a week where I will only have access to the kitchen to cook for one-two days (including one with 8 guests).

Also, I am frustrated with the lack of forward progress on the baby’s room. I have been attempting to “clean” the Rubbermaid wired shelves that were left by the previous owner of the house. They have begun to break down, apparently and feel quite sticky and many of them have a gross yellowish ook on them that can only be removed by lots of rubbing with alcohol. It’s very slow going and since I’m not convinced that I like the configuration and they are very old-school so they can’t easily be moved around to a different configuration, I have stopped after several hours yesterday to get a second opinion from my mother. Mr. Moose was unable to do any work over the weekend on the patching and scraping of the walls due to yardwork/a last minute concert e attended Saturday night/plans with friends/a work thing/ demolition on the kitchen taking precedence. (He was obviously QUITE busy.) I really wanted it DONE by Thanksgiving, but that isn’t happening – at this point I’d be happy if it was PRIMED by then, but I’m not holding my breath. Mom’s friend is going to help with the fancy painting – possibly doing a mural on one wall – and I need to have her over to look at the space, but was hoping to do so after it was primed so it didn’t look so terrible.

I’ve had some Braxton hicks contractions today, and just came to the realization that I’m getting pretty near 30 weeks (I’m 25 weeks today). This seems like a mile-stone to me (30 weeks, that is) because I’ve very much been looking forward to it for some reason. I just figured it out on my calendar, though that 32 weeks occurs on New Year’s Eve which is MUCH too early for the baby to come even though somehow I had it in my head that if she were to come really early, I’d be okay as long as it was after 32 weeks. Anyway – the mind of a pregnant woman is a weird thing, I assure you.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

We did the high school Homecoming thing this past weekend. They were having a ceremony to honor the first football team our school had had 10 years ago (Mr. Moose was one of the captains of said team) and he was invited to come out and participate. Considering my boss happens to be a member of the school board and the member in charge of this event, I figured it would be ideal to encourage him to go. Not that it took too much effort – he was thrilled to relive his football memories. I was a little bored – I hung out with my MIL and SIL most of the night with a few visits to some old friends of other classes (none of my own classmates were there – secretly still protesting the addition of football to our fair school, perhaps? We were Seniors when they announced that they would be adding a football program the following year and none of us were terribly thrilled about it. As I recall, we all silently protested it by skipping the lunch-time pep rally thrown to kick it off and for once, all showed up early to our 6th period classes despite the fact that most of the other students and teachers were still down on the field whooping it up).

At one point, I went to the area behind the bleachers to see if anyone I knew was milling about back there. There were plenty of current students in clusters talking or playing and some younger kids were playing a pathetic game of football (more like catch with a football instead of a baseball). All of a sudden, I felt something hit me, kind of hard, in the stomach – and a football fell to the ground next to me. Suddenly, there was no interest in said ball – everyone around had turned their backs in my direction and were simply standing around talking (it was an accident, so I was hardly going to get overly mad – you’d think some kid would just come up, mutter “sorry” and grab his ball to go return to playing, but whatever.) I got a little concerned about the baby, but figured that while it did hurt, it wasn’t all that likely to have hurt her. My SIL (who teaches at the school) offered to go after whoever had done it when she returned from the bathroom, but since I didn’t know, we dropped it.

Mr. Moose and his former teammates had been invited to stay and watch the game from the sidelines, and, armed with a camera, took pictures until halftime. By that point, my feet were killing me, I was incredibly bored and I really just wanted to go home. We got in the briefest of spats on our way back to the car and in telling him about my attack-football incident, I suddenly and uncontrollably began to cry. My dinner that evening had been pitiful and I really wanted him to stop for a milkshake, but I couldn’t even seem to get that out. (He ultimately ended up feeding me and it was good, even if it wasn’t a milkshake.)

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

I’m so glad I didn’t sign up for NaBloPoMo – though that may have made me get off my rear and do more posting!

I’m really feeling like I’ve been getting bigger this past week – I’ve asked Mr. Moose, but he’s not stupid and won’t answer that question (even when pregnant, it’s never a good idea to answer “do I look fatter than usual?”) I think I gained a few pounds, but I missed my regular weekly weigh-in at the grocery store (he went by himself at the end of a very long Monday) and so I’m not really sure.

I had a fright last night where my swelling feet started to go numb – but I think I may have just simply been lying too flat. My feet have begun to swell regularly at the end of the day – not freakishly as of yet, but enough that they are a bit puffy, and I’ve tried to elevate them more at night. Sitting up straighter seemed to help and Mr. Moose gave me a foot massage (isn’t he the greatest?)

I had an amazing bath last night after dinner – I tossed a tiny bit of bubbles in (I vaguely remember reading something about not taking bubble baths when pregnant, but I’m not sure it made sense, so I just kept it to a bare minimum) and made it just warm enough that I wasn’t sweating or anything, but it was really comfy. We got a cold front for this time of year and our high today was 70 degrees. I wore my leather jacket to the office since this city is essentially on the water and we were forecasted to get a decent amount of wind today – I couldn’t even think of buttoning it, but thankfully it wasn’t quite that cold! I’ll be stealing Mr. Moose’s jacket and/or living in the fleece sweatshirts from Old Navy as the weather gets cooler. No sense in buying a jacket that I may not be able to wear again because it’s so big!

I’ve struggled with my larger-than-usual tummy of late. I’ve never been one to be overly conscious of my weight – sure I bemoan the fact that I can’t fit into the cute little dresses I loved when I was skinny, but it’s never been a big obsession. As a matter of fact I vaguely remember thinking in passing “I wish I could just say I was pregnant – at least then any weight I had on me would be called baby and not that I’m a cow.” But lately, I’m noticing the size of my belly even more – and I’m not even to the rapidly growing stage yet. I have no problem gaining weight or stature for the health of my baby – I haven’t been dieting or anything – I’ve been eating reasonable meals, I’ve cut out the alcohol, and I’ve been craving vegetables and fruit, so the pounds haven’t really piled on, even though my tummy has definitely expanded. I guess I just wonder if I’m totally going to hate my body at the end of pregnancy and if I’ll ever have a decently-sized stomach again. I’ve never been one to do much exercise, I’ve never been one to be good about dieting – will it shrink down on it’s own to a reasonable post-baby size? Will I ever be less than fat again? I admit that I was less than (or more than?) skinny when I conceived – but I actually figured I may have lost some fat in the early days of pregnancy when I didn’t want to eat much, and what I wanted was healthy and low-fat. I figured that might have been the contributing factor to the expansion of my waistline and lack of gain on the scale. Am I doomed to be one of those “always a little heavy” mothers that no one really finds all that attractive?

Friday, November 2, 2007

Ask Moxie today had a topic about the ideal spacing of siblings and it got me thinking. I guess I had always assumed that most people purposely had siblings every 2-3 years (certainly the case in Mr. Moose’s family – 4 kids all approximately 2 years apart with the last one slightly more, but only so much that she falls to the next school grade by a couple of months). I started to think about my own thoughts and compare them to the sibling sets I know and how they worked out.

My BFF’s husband and his brother are about 10 years apart and have really never gotten along. My BFF is paranoid about large gaps in sibling age because of that (her sons are about 3 years apart and she is content with that), and yet another friend is the youngest of 4 siblings – the first 2 being 17 and 19 years older than she and the 3rd being 3 years older (#3 was an “oops” and then their parents decided “well, we’re doing it again anyway, why not 2?”) and my friend and her brother (who was 17 when she was born) are close and loving, she has a usual love/hate relationship with the one who is only 3 years older and she and the oldest sister kind of ignore each other’s existence. (I didn’t know the oldest existed for years, to tell you the truth since by the time I came along, she was married with a couple of kids and lived out of state.

I think I always assumed that we’d have another in 2-3 years, but a lot of that depends on our financial situation. I never even remotely considered having one sooner than 2 years (or pretty close, anyhow) though the more we talk about prevention/post-baby BC the more nervous I get with the possibility of having an “oops”.

Several of Moxie’s commenters mentioned things other than numbers for when they wanted to wait until – when the first was done nursing, or out of diapers, in school, potty trained. I see a lot of benefit to many of them. And in some ways, we’re going to have to play it by ear, I’m sure.

My sisters kids are spaced 2 years, 3 years and 22 months apart, but almost none of them was exactly planned that way (the 2 girls were happy surprises) and number 2 was a “let’s wait and see” pregnancy.

Ultimately, I don’t know what will happen for us – and it will largely depend on how well we do with our finances and when/if I’m able to stay home and how much I’m able to work at a part-time job, etc. This is likely something that will also depend on the personality of our baby in the first place (ie, a high-needs baby will put off the sibling a little longer, an easy baby might make it more likely to have number 2 sooner. And of course, this assumes we get a choice. A surprise pregnancy or a much-delayed one are just as likely as having a choice in the matter.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

I have little-to-no voice today, but despite the coughing I actually slept reasonably well. (I would cough 2-3 times each time I woke up and then it would settle down and I’d drift off to sleep, so I lost no more sleep than I would have had I not been sick. I’m up every 1-2 hours to waddle to the restroom regardless.) I wanted to call in (well, email-in) sick, but since I feel well enough to do paperwork, I figured I should be a good employee and come in anyway. I hope I don’t regret that decision.

Rant about pregnancy-approved meds: WHAT is the point of plain Rob*ituss*in? My list said I could take Rob*itus*sin DM which is listed on the bottle as both an expectorant and a suppressant (how does THAT work?) and it doesn’t seem to actually DO anything. I still cough and it doesn’t really seem to be any looser – maybe a TINY bit, but not enough to qualify, in my opinion. And if you’ve got a sore throat, forget it. Sure, they claim you can take Chlor*iseptic, but that stuff is so nasty (who wants half their mouth to be numb for 5 minutes and then to have it wear off and be useless again?) and pointless and bad for your vocal chords that I really don’t see the point. (I was a singer in high school and was forbidden to take any numbing spray or anything with eucalyptus in it since it does more harm than good to your vocal chords. If it hurts to talk, it means your chords are inflamed and you shouldn’t be talking/singing anyway or you could damage them). I suck on lozenges (in high school we were allowed to have jolly ranchers or lemonheads in lieu of lozenges as well) to keep my throat moist, but that does little for the pain. Having a cold while pregnant shouldn’t be possible.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

I’ve been slacking again. But I have an excuse! I got Mr. Moose’s cold and, seeing as I’m pregnant, I can’t take a lot of the medication to make me feel more normal. I never thought I would be jonesing for drugs, but I miss Tylenol Cold something awful.

Had my 23 week appointment yesterday and everything is as is should be. I still haven’t gained any weight – I’m technically up a pound – but the docs aren’t concerned as long I as I assure them I’m eating (I am) and not exercising too much (not a chance) and the baby is growing properly (she is). She has been very active for several days and I’m adjusting to the sensation much better now that it is more frequent and less of a surprise every time. Mr. Moose finally got to feel her kick on Sunday, which made us both very happy.

We’ll be going to our high school Homecoming game on Friday night – my husband was part of the school’s first football team and they are doing a special celebration of those team members this year and he was asked to come back for that ceremony. In the email that included all the details, it was mentioned that one member of the team (who happens to be my high school boyfriend) is serving in Iraq and won’t be able to attend. I said to Mr. Moose “well, at least I won’t have to worry about him grabbing my butt again,” referring to the last time we were in the same place (albeit, this was years ago) when he thought it would be funny to grab/slap my rear as he walked by. Mr. Moose agreed and said he was also glad of that (they had been very good friends back in the day) since he didn’t want to have words with a Marine. I also countered that he was less likely a few years older and now that I’m pregnant to be that obnoxious, but we wish him safety in his efforts in Iraq, nonetheless.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

I had the weirdest dream Sunday night. I dreamt that Mr. Moose and I were living in a house (not one that I recognized) with my mother and that my old dog was there and still alive. Our current dogs were also there and while my dog, Murphy, had lived with Tiki, Mr. Moose’s dog, buck never did. But anyway. One summer afternoon I let the dog outside and then, 5 days alter at 4am I realized that I couldn’t remember letting him back in – ever – and I hadn’t seen him in days. I think I may have killed him, though that was never determined in the dream. I woke up at 4am and couldn’t stop focusing on the dream thinking over and over “oh my gosh, I killed the dog and how on earth am I going to be a mother if I can’t take care of a dog?” Tiki died of old age and other related health problems nearly a year ago and I had nothing to do with it, by the way. The only other thing my mind would think about was an annoying line from a stupid Orbitz gum commercial – “Who are you calling a cootie queen, you lint licker?!” Very weird nights.

I also had dreams this week including borrowing a suit for Mr. Moose (who is a large man) from a gay male co-worker (who is significantly smaller) – when he brought in his suit, it was sour apple green. (My co-worker isn’t typically that flamboyant) and another dream that included kicking the butt of a high school classmate for cutting in line at a public restroom (like now, when I’m 6 months pregnant) – I haven’t seen or heard from/about this person in AGES, so no telling why she was in my dream.

(TMI alert) Monday night my gastrointestinal festival finally got geared up and I had this incredibly painful session in the bathroom. It included lots of groaning and moaning and ultimately ended with me waking Mr. Moose out of a dead sleep to come take care of me when I got close to fainting. It was awful. I felt so bad for waking him and scaring him, but I was starting to panic that I would faint and knock myself out, or that all the pain and contracting in my body was distressing the baby, etc. We then fought over the toilet for several minutes (the problem with only having one bathroom) and I informed him that we were definitely getting the epidural during labor. It was so awful. The good news is, I’m feeling much emptier, the softener I took over the weekend did do a decent amount of good and I’m back to milkshakes doing their duty (add to that a combo of apples, raisin bran and anything else I could possibly think of to naturally get me moving). My various ways to keep conscious involve cold wet clothes on the back of my neck, purposely trying to even my breathing (easier said than done when in pain) and ice cold water to cool me down. By the time I finally got back to bed, I was exhausted and fell asleep quickly. (It didn’t last – the water came back to haunt me an hour later). But the baby was active this morning and I’m beginning to feel the little bump, bump on the outside occasionally, so hopefully Mr. Moose will soon get to feel it too.

My sister had her baby. It’s a girl (I’m so excited!) and her name is Rebecca. Rebecca was one of our choices, and I am now thinking I will have to put it aside. Mr. Moose hates that reasoning, but I stand firm that close family/friends shouldn’t share names of kids to avoid confusion – at least if they are close in age. It gets too confusing when they spend lots of time together. I’m bummed since it was going to be paired with my Grandmother’s name and I’ve been increasingly liking the idea of having a “Becca” around. But alas, we’re pretty much down to 2, though last night I started pouring through the books to see if I could find another. It seems like it’s too early to have the decision made or something. (We have a 3rd name that I have been yet unwilling to drop from the official consideration list. Meaning-wise, it’s the prettiest of them all, but it’s also the least common/popular of the group and the most likely to better fit a girly-girl than a tomboy, hence my reason for loving it.) I cannot decide if I am superstitious enough to believe that the child’s name will (at least help) determine the personality of the child or not. If so, I want to have a name that will encompass all my hopes and dreams for my baby girl and some of these names just don’t cut it. They’re nice, pretty, full of personal meaning to us, but less-so full of hopes and dreams for her personality, etc.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

We are planning to ask Mr. Moose’s sister, J, to become the legal guardian of Kremit (and her future siblings) in case anything were to happen to both of us. We have many reasons for this, which I plan to list, but I also have my concerns, as well. We plan to ask (and actually have already) my father to become the financial guardian for the inheritance for the baby, deciding to spread the responsibility around on both sides of the family (and he’s EXCELLENT with money, so it’s incredibly logical). We got that idea from my co-worker, Fran, who has an only child who stands to inherit quite a bit of change if something were to happen to Fran and her husband. Fran’s sister is the physical guardian and her husband’s sister is the financial trustee. That way no one has too much power, you know?

We won’t be leaving that much behind (at least at this point), but we both have fairly substantial life-insurance policies now (which we got when we found out I was pregnant, just for this purpose). To us, our actions make a lot of sense. (To my mother, not so much. She was okay with my dad being trustee – I think even she knows that he is WAY better w/ money than she is, though I doubt she’d admit that formally. She had quite the objection when I informed her that we would be asking one of the girls to be the physical guardian of the baby should both Mr. Moose and I die. I know she’d do it in a heartbeat, but she really has no idea where she and her husband will be in the next 18+ years either health-wise or emotionally, etc. I know they would always love my child to the best of their ability, but logically… it makes sense to choose someone from our generation.)

So, J has been our choice, though we haven’t yet discussed it with her. We’d like to as soon as possible, so we can then tell his other sisters face-to-face at Thanksgiving what our choice is.

So our reasons for choosing J are logical, practical ones. 1)At this point, she is the most stable sister who lives here. Mr. Moose’s little sister, LP, also lives here, but is still in school (college) and no one really knows what her future will entail. Where will she get a job? Will she get married (she hasn’t ever seriously dated someone to our knowledge), etc. His older sister, LB, is married and expecting her own child, but she lives in North Carolina with the stated fact of “no intention to ever move to Florida” coming from my BIL. 1b) We would prefer for Kremit to not have to move away if something were to happen to us. 1c) We would like for her to be able to be around both sides of the family and since my family isn’t likely to move away too far, this is the location we would prefer to have the guardian in. 2) J is responsible – she is a teacher with strong values, and while I cannot say that she would raise our daughter the way we would (she is significantly more conservative than either Mr. Moose or I) I know that her guidance would be stable, loving and very consistent with the way they were brought up as children (J seems to be the most like her mother in that department, with LB a close 2nd). 3) Though she might not raise our daughter exactly the way we would, she has always been incredibly maternal and we know that she would be an excellent mother. (LP, for example, is going to be a great Aunt, but since she claims she never wants children… why would we ask her to be saddled with ours?)

My concerns are that she is single, and while I think she would ultimately like to get married, she has no immediate prospects and I don’t know what her future husband might say to this commitment. I’m sure that a man who wouldn’t want to care for her (theoretically) dead-brother’s children likely wouldn’t pass muster with her, but you never know what their situation would be looking forward to an unknown future. I am also saddened that we don’t have an option for which I could confidently say “this person will raise my child the way I would,” but I have every confidence that J would do an excellent job.

We discussed the possibility of asking my sister to be the guardian, but with she and her family in another country, I get concerned about the logistics. Plus, the she’s-got-4-kids (almost)-already issue, and we chose to ask J first.

We were planning to get with her one-on-one over lunch today after church, but Mr. Moose has come down with a severe cold and we had to stay home. We want to make sure we talk to her and she is able to think about it for a bit before she has to make a decision and we’d like to talk to his other sisters over Thanksgiving (likely, the last time we’ll see LB before each of our children is born and we think it will be better coming from us face-to-face than via phone).

What are your plans for your child's future in a situation where you are no longer around to handle it?

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

This morning my company is without communications (no phones, no email, no network access and no printing to network printers) and so I have nothing to do until out service provider gets off their rears accept write a long, newsy post. Aren’t you lucky?

I have past the 21-week mark and am feeling very pregnant. I slept poorly the night before and ended up too much on my stomach – then the baby seemed to have a sleepy day and wasn’t moving as much – I was beginning to freak out. She started moving later in the day, but not as much as usual, so I’m still at least slightly concerned. If I don’t feel much movement today, I’ll be calling the doctor this afternoon (as we’ve been planning to leave town tomorrow morning and spend the day at Disney). How bad is it, if you put too much weight on your stomach?

My co-workers have been randomly (actually alphabetically) choosing names of the day for the baby lately. We’ve come up with a system of “nice” names, silly names and names pertaining to liquor. Today’s liquor name is Limoncello (one of my favorites) and my co-workers choice of a “nice name” happens to be one of our 4 choices (which surprised me, since it’s not overly popular). I found it amusing that she chose that name out of the blue.

On the names subject: Our top choices originally included the name Cathryn Alexa, but that has since been dropped. I still like it – it’s actually a family name on my/my mother’s side (my great-grandmother was Anna Catherine) and my mom is Alexa. I’d still like to consider it for the future – maybe daughter number 2? – but I’d like to come up with something a little less directly connected to my family and my family alone for our first child. I did find out in passing that my SIL J likes that name and was bummed that we rejected it, but I don’t think any of our names are so far out there that anyone will hate them.

Well, the baby has made the occasional kick this morning, but not the persistent rumblings that she was doing as recently as a couple of days again. I also haven’t had as much sugar or caffeine today as usual (I’m trying not to stimulate her too much) but I may change that later today if she still isn’t jumping this afternoon.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Some women talk about having an immediate attachment to the growing baby inside the moment they find out she is in there. Some don’t feel it until a little later – at an ultrasound, when the baby first starts to move and they feel it, etc. Some women care for the baby, but that unequivocal love doesn’t happen until she is born.

I find that I have moments where I go back and forth. Sure, I’m truly attached to this baby – she is very really to me (especially when she starts to dance around in there) and I’ve always thought of her as a baby, not just some tissue with potential. She became both more real and more surreal to me when “it” became a “she” last week. I have trouble imagining certain parts of how she will come to us (having no idea what to expect w/ labor for instance), but he feelings that I have are strong – and I know that I would be devastated if something were to happen to her. But there are moments when it is clear that I love this little person, and moments where it’s more of an idea – she’s not completely real yet.

I assume that this is the way many/most women feel when their babies are forming.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Is it terrible that I plan to refuse to let my daughter go to visit at my MIL and GmIL’s houses? Both houses are a total mess. There is “stuff” piled in my MIL’s house and I’m afraid that one day my then-crawling or walking baby will be crushed in an avalanche. I am seriously terrified of what could happen to my baby in that house.

Most of the time, I like my ILs – Sure I complain about the lack of warmth in my MIL (her husband used to say she could freeze anyone out) to me, but I’m sure she’ll love her grandchildren, etc. She’s not an irresponsible person, but I am truly scared of the “what-ifs” of leaving a child there to roam around the room for even a split second. And my husband agrees. Is there a way to kindly ask her to clean up the junk in her house before I allow my baby to visit for more than a few minutes, safely in my arms? At this point, there is no room to even put down a blanket (not that I would, since that floor hasn’t seen a mop or broom in at least 10 years and they have animals) or set up a pack’n’play that would at least be a contained, safe, clean environment. There MIGHT be enough room to set down the infant carrier, but her dogs aren’t that well behaved and I would want to be very cautious about that.

My mom used to have a sign in her house that declared “A clean house is the sign of a misspent life.” Growing up there was always clutter and we rarely did one of those spic and span type cleanings which would include dusting every surface, etc. So sure, our house was far from “clean” but it was never like this house. There is always room for multiple people to sit down, to set your things, and I can’t picture a time when we couldn’t have set up a pack’n’play for a visiting child (not that we had many, but we could have.)

So if I want one of my SILs or MIL to babysit (which they have all implied they are most willing to do) I will have to have them come to us – but I’m picturing that coming up as an issue at some point. How will we handle it? I have no idea.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

We’re doing this budget thing – the Dave Ramsey system involving a budget and steps and most of all envelopes earmarked for the usual expenses. I think it’s brought our random spending down quite a bit. I haven’t really been paying close attention to our debt going down, though I know most of our furniture is paid off, and the cards and student loans are being paid regularly, etc. It’s sometimes frustrating – I get so sick of cooking/cleaning and want to just go out to dinner (even something extraordinarily cheap) where other people do the dishes, but we budgeted and bought our meals for the week, so that’s a no-no. We’ve been going to my mom’s each week for dinner because we budget that way. Sometimes it’s a productive evening (last week he showed them how to use their website he designed for them, this week she and I are going to pour over her maternity medical books for details she’s long since forgotten about labor and delivery), sometimes not, but overall a good time is had by all and we don’t have to spend $ or clean up dishes.

Because of the budget, we’re able to more clearly see our monthly financial situation and what our options for post-baby are as far as my working and how much and where. Neither of us really wants me to return to my current employer. I’ve been given a head’s up on openings in a national company’s credit headquarters in Tampa. Mr. Moose’s boss’s wife works there as a supervisor and with her reference, I could easily get a job there. It would mean a longer commute (by quite a bit), but more money per hour and really great benefits for me, the baby and Mr. Moose if he chooses to drop his old plan and get on mine. (We would supplement his, but mine and the baby’s would be no cost after the first 90 days. He already supplements his at his current place of employment, and this would be cheaper). But I’d lose 6 of my 12 weeks of maternity leave and I’d be forced to leave work pre-due date in order to not risk the commute if I went into labor, etc. (Did I mention that I’m less than 10 minutes away from the hospital if I stay where I am now? That’s a good 25-45 minutes closer than home depending on traffic. If I were to go to work in Tampa, I’d be close to an hour away depending on the bridges, etc.) I think we’ve decided to not have me go for this job until after the baby is born, if we do decide it’s best.

It’s the insurance that kills us. To add both Kremit and me to Mr. Moose’s plan would nearly cut his take-home pay in half. I have to find alternate insurance, that’s really all there is to it.

I had always assumed that I would have to return to work after Kremit was born – we have too many student loans to pay off for me to stay home, though we can easily get household expenses down to just his salary. (and we mostly do). But recently, in talking about the possibility of not returning to work, or at least not returning full-time, I’m now bummed that I can’t do it that way.

We’re still looking at options: that medical transcription thing is still on the table and I recently thought about seeing if I could return to my current employer part-time for a few months at least (though I haven’t voiced this thought to anyone). I’ve requested that I have the chance SOON to sit down w/ my bosses to discuss my maternity leave details. I also want to see if there is a way that I can convince them, just this once, to allow me to roll my accrued vacation time past December, seeing as we know exactly WHEN I will be using it, early on in the following year.

Monday, October 8, 2007

We have 4 name pairs (first and middle names) picked out that both of us like. I’ve stuck with these pairs for awhile now, though the order of preference changes regularly. I remember doing that with my dog, as well, alternating the 2 names I’d chosen during the drive back from getting him. I’ve been trying them on for size, alternating each day. We are not sharing our choices IRL because of the opinions of our family (we have different tastes and offense is often taken when their advice isn’t) and we don’t want it getting back to them, so… I’ve shared with a couple of online communities, though I’m not sure if I’m ready to discuss it here. Part of me wants to as a record of everything in my pregnancy, part of me is constantly afraid of family members finding this blog, though I’ve done my best to hide my identity.

I have 4 names – each evoking a different feeling in my own mind – my Southern belle name, my Irish lass name, my sophisticated tomboy name and my classic lady name. I have nicknames picked out for 2, but for one, I think I prefer using the nickname more than the full name. In theory, I’m not sure how I feel about that. I did not learn my own full name for years – and was almost never called by it. I essentially had to switch schools (college) to get people to consistently call me by my full name instead of my childhood nickname. Even my husband and my in-laws refer to me by my childhood nickname, since they met me before college. Do I want to saddle my daughter with that? Of course 2 of my best friends (my childhood best friend and my current best girlfriend) actually prefer their younger-sounding nickname to their full name and even in their late twenties, they go by these names – who is to say my daughter won’t prefer that as well?

There is always one name (and it is consistently the same name) that is my 4th choice. I love the names in general, but it has always been more of my “fall-back” name. Like “well, if we can’t come up with something we like, this will do.” I’m thinking of bumping it to the background and replacing it with another option. I may have even found one, but I really only recently proposed it to Mr. Moose (and by that I mean this morning, via email though it’s been brought up before).

We registered over the weekend – it was long, a little stressful (as Saturday’s at Babies’R’Us tend to be very busy) and a lot of fun. Mr. Moose got burned out well before I did, but once he finally convinced me to stop and settle down, I realized how amazingly tired I was, too. I bought a sleeper that is very girly and yet incredibly practical. I will be an ideal “going home” outfit if I don’t find something else, but no matter what, I bought her the first girlie outfit. Maybe that’s silly – but it meant something to me.

I’m quite excited about the preparation of getting ready for baby. We began looking at the guest room/soon-to-be nursery over the weekend. I’m frustrated because we’ve been using the guest closet as a catch all for storage since we moved in – extra blankets/pillows/wrapping paper, games, trinkets, decorations that are too delicate to be left in our sweltering garage, etc. I have no place to put these things yet (obviously, some of them will be discarded in some way) and therefore I have no place to put the baby stuff, either. I’m ready to get organized and I can’t. I’m raring to go and get the space ready for the baby.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

It’s a girl! After a lengthy wait (my sonogram was scheduled for 11, with a follow up midwife appt at 11:30 – we got into the sonogram room around 11:50) and quite a bit of time convincing her to uncross her legs enough to see what was there, we saw our little lady had lady parts. I was so thrilled, since I wanted a girl so badly to start with. We got a few 4D pictures, which I’m hoping to post soon for you to see. I cried twice during the sonogram this time – everyone always asks if I cried and I always think, “why on earth would I cry?”

It took what seemed like forever to get to “that part” of the u/s. I remember thinking “okay, I’m glad everything seems to be formed right, but this is a little baby, how many parts are you going to check? Get on with it!” Finally the tech said, “ah, there’s the problem…” and typed on the screen after she pointed out two little lines “A DAUGHTER.” She explained that the 2 little lines she showed us were the bones under the labia or something of that matter. She was pretty confident that it was a girl.

That night our little lady started tapping around a lot more, much more regularly and much more definite. She’s pretty consistent in her movements now, especially when I have something sweet/caffeinated to drink.

Once we finally got out of the office (we had a rushed meeting w/ the midwife, had issues w/ the DVD of the session recording properly, had to schedule an appointment w/ a receptionist who was on a personal phone call…) we started making calls. Mr. Moose called his mother and two older sisters and got voicemail repeatedly. My mother answered quickly, got the “it’s a girl” news, squealed with joy and then informed me that she was with a patient and would call me later. I tried my BFF (who I later remembered was in her first day of practicum student teaching and couldn’t answer the phone) and called my grandmother. Meanwhile, Mr. Moose had tried his grandmother and finally his little sister. As LP’s phone was ringing he said, “if no one from my family answers, then I’m not telling any of them”, but she did and was the first on his side to hear the news. His sisters and eventually his mom called later. My grandmother was thrilled beyond belief, though I know she would have been happy either way. I was concerned that Mr. Moose’s sister J would be disappointed, as she has been the most vocal about wanting him to have a son to carry on the family name, but ultimately, I think she was thrilled either way. My dad, who rarely shows any emotion, seemed pretty excited, as well. He told me “I like girls best!” and the email he sent to my aunts was pretty happy, too.

We have bought the base coat and the main color of paint for the nursery (a shade of sage green called “Christopher Robin’s Swing”) and Mr. Moose seems to be in project mode regarding starting the painting and clearing out of our little girl’s room. I am so incredibly happy and yet, in some ways it seems a little surreal to me that

Monday, October 1, 2007

Do “real” parents worry about packing their kids lunches in Ziploc baggies? Seriously? My mom never did and she’s pretty environmentally conscious. Maybe there is some new info out there that I haven’t seen, I’m just trying hard to picture my mom (or myself) getting worked up over tossing my pretzel stick snacks or grapes or whatever into a Ziploc instead of something “safer” and reusable. I’ve heard the thing about not microwaving plastic, and, okay, maybe – but for basic stuff? I’m so confused! More research to do, I guess, but I’m having trouble getting behind this being an issue. Maybe when my child is born my sense of safety will change or something?

I just learned that my vacation time will not carry over into next calendar year. I had been carefully hoarding my nearly 2 weeks of PTO all summer long, despite the fact that Mr. Moose has nearly a month coming to him and we could have, in fact, taken a vacation. When I began here, nearly 3 years ago it was unclearly explained and my review of the employee manual fed that assumption that while sick time doesn’t roll over, vacation time does. Ironically, I am the benefits specialist at our company now and have explained it improperly to many of our current employees as well. They pay 50% if you cash out in December your remaining time, but they want to clear the books for the year, so they won’t roll it over. This gives me 2 months to use or lose my vacation time and I am TICKED. I was planning to use that time for the early part of my maternity leave. There is no way I can accrue very much time in 2 months (13 hours, approximately is the total of what I will have if I go into labor on my due date while sitting at work), which is going to put an even bigger financial strain on us during my maternity leave. What really frosts my cookies is that if you quit, they pay you in full for your accrued time off – not 50%. They’re treating ex-employees better than current ones. I’m stressed and ticked off and Mr. Moose is now more than ready to get me out of here. We’re going to test run in November what life would be like without my income (we’ll sock it all away for baby expenses and the like) and I’m discussing my options for other work, etc.).

I know most people rarely ever feel like they are paid what they are worth – I truly don’t even have a number in mind for a salary that would make me feel like I was getting paid what I am worth – I’ve never bothered to try and figure it out and I know I create a lot of down time for myself because I have trouble focusing for long periods of time on one thing. (and I like it that way) But lately, I feel that not only don’t they want to PAY me even close to what I’m worth (for example, there is only one person at the office that has been here longer than me – their first employee when the company began under it’s current ownership/name 5 years ago. I am also the LOWEST paid person in the entire company – which includes the girl they hired to replace my old position who does less than I do and has an attendance problem), but they don’t respect the amount of work I do, the amount of info that I have on their company and what they would do without me. Seriously, the President of the company’s favorite phrase lately seems to be “Mrs. Moose can do it.” (Of course, he doesn’t call me Mrs. Moose, but you get my point.) If I were to stick it to them and walk out (as Mr. Moose as suggested a few times), they seriously would be up a creek. Even if I took my two weeks notice to write out the info that would need to be passed on – I’d run out of time to do it. I remember trying to do that for my old position replacement – and she was only taking 1/5 of my jobs – the info took 5 pages! I don’t know what they’re going to do when I’m on maternity leave - I seriously expect multiple phone calls over my 12 weeks off.

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Heather at Unexplain This did a post to day about her daycare option/choice which inspired me to write about ours. I think I’ve mentioned it previously, in passing, but I’ll talk about it more depth today, especially after Heather made me think about details I’d never considered before.

My friend M has a home daycare. She has 2 adorable children (her oldest, a daughter was one of my flower girls at my wedding) ages 4 and 2 and she is due to have her 3rd child approximately 2 months before me. I’ve known M for eons, and her husband, A has been a good friend of mine for even longer (I sang at their wedding – A is like my big brother). I trust M completely, I know there is no risk of odd or strange people being invited over to her house (other than her friends, who since many of them are my friends too, I can say they’re “safely” weird). M raises her children very similarly to the way I plan to raise my child/children. And I’m thrilled at the opportunity to have her 3rd child and mine, who will be very close to the same age growing up together. M has a history being a professional nanny for two families in the area and has had a host of kids in her daycare in the last few years. (She gave up nannying when her son was born since bringing 2 children along to someone else’s house was much more difficult). I even remember shopping with her (at Christmas time, when she was 9 month pregnant and her daughter was about 18 months and needed to be distracted) to get the final supplies for setting up her daycare.

On the other hand, I’m a little jealous that Heather gets to take her child to a daycare center where they have such stringent guidelines regarding cleanliness, etc. M has 2 cats and a dog, and while they are very well-behaved and I never see evidence of their natural animal mess laying around, I pray that my baby doesn’t get her father’s cat hair allergies!

I’m also still actively seeking other options for the baby – like me working from home so I don’t have to deal with daycare at all. I have a feeling it’s a pipe dream, as my mom just gave me some info regarding the medical transcriptionist possibility that may have shot it out of the water. More research to be done, but I’m getting more and more discouraged.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

I’m having a rough day. My back hurts, none of my bras fit right now, I feel like I’m already outgrowing my size large maternity clothes (and some of my XLs) and I’m miserable in my job. Everyone around here is under a lot of stress and it’s not making for a pleasant atmosphere. I can’t handle the drama from those who have outside issues anymore and while I want to be supportive to my co-workers and friends who need to vent, it just stresses me out to hear that everyone is unhappy. Not that I’m overly happy – don’t get me wrong! And I want this baby – I want it so bad I can’t wait to hold it in my arms, but I’m not even half way done w/ pregnancy and I just want the next 4 months to FLY.

I’ve run into the issue of counting the time of pregnancy this week. At 18 weeks, I’m 2 weeks past my 4 month mark, and theoretically 4 ½ months along, however, I’m not halfway through my 9 months of pregnancy for another 2 weeks (which is technically at the 5 month mark). For some strange reason this has frustrated me today to no end. I’m ready to be halfway done.

Monday, September 24, 2007

I had weird dreams over the weekend about feeding the baby. The weirdest one included the baby being a few days old and waking up for a middle of the night feeding and one of us forgetting that we were breast-feeding and giving the baby formula that we have on hand (we’ve got a bunch of samples around) and my milk not coming in because we had just skipped a few breast-feedings. And then, when we DID finally get it to come in, it started spurting everywhere – even when the baby wasn’t sucking. It was leaking like a pressurized water balloon – in three places (not where it should have been) like 3 streaming leaks. It was freaky.

We spent the evening on Saturday at K and M’s house having dinner and playing games. Their 4-year-old son LOVES Mr. Moose and was jumping all over him all evening. I think maybe Mr. Moose may have caught his cold because he seems to be sick now (the hours of horrendous snoring would prove it) and I was up half the night. I remember seeing 3:30 and then 5:00, so I did get over an hour of uninterrupted sleep, but tonight if it continues, one of us will be sleeping in the guest room. I have begun my Zicam treatments to stave off the germs for me and the baby. I am a terrible sick person and without the help of drugs, I imagine it will be worse (I know there are a few things I can take, and will likely try them all, but you never know).

I had a weird fainting spell over the weekend. I’m accustomed to fainting in reaction to pain, and this was similar to that, minus the pain. I was cleaning in the dining room and started to feel “funny.” I said so to Mr. Moose and he said “like how?” I informed him at that point that I sort of felt like I had to faint and that my vision was starting to go dark (the indicator to me typically that I was about to lose consciousness) he came over, put his arm around me and it kept getting darker around me. I felt my knees give out and lost consciousness for about 30 seconds during which time he slowly lowered me to the floor. By the time I was all the way on the floor, I was conscious again and feeling hot and clammy, but overall, not bad. Some water and breakfast seemed to stabilize me and I’ve not really been overly concerned since. I learned this morning when I called the doctor’s office to report the incident that I could have called and talked to the doctor on call over the weekend (no one has given me any instructions regarding anything of the sort – I’m starting to think the only good thing about this practice is it’s proximity to my office and my wonderful Nurse Practitioner who has little to do with me now that I’m pregnant (she doesn’t deliver babies). My mother is concerned about the lack of attention paid to my weak vagal nerve issue (the faint in response to pain is caused by this) and wants me to get more adamant about it in the future.

In other news, I am still having multiple problems dealing with a certain employee at work. I’m beginning to think she is evil. Most of my co-workers would agree, it’s only the 2 bosses who think she’s fine. Of course. I’m currently at the point at work though, that I’m feeling like I can’t do anything right. I’m so sick of this woman in general and all of the crazy stuff going down in our office lately, that I may be ready to move on.

Mr. Moose and I have been discussing options for extra income (beyond his) once the baby has arrived. I’m going to start more seriously looking into work-from-home typing type jobs. My mom’s next-door neighbor has done work as a medical transcriptionist from home for decades (well before the internet made it incredibly popular to work from home, etc.) and I may look into that. I’m a strong typist and I really don’t want to risk doing a phone job from home with the baby possibly crying in the background. I plan to go talk to the neighbor about it, see if she has any feedback or tips for getting started, etc. Mr. Moose was pleasantly surprised that I had given it so much thought, as I’ve always indicated that despite the rough patches, I’m overall very happy with my job. Which has been true. In the past. But I think I’m over it.

I like the social aspects of working in an office – I’m a very social person, so I don’t think working from home will become my ultimate stop once the baby is older, etc. but I’m willing to see what it will take to do the best thing for my family and I’m ready to be done with this place, I think. We shall see what happens.

Friday, September 21, 2007

How much does your mentality change when you become a mom? I’ve always wondered if I have an ugly baby, will I know it? Will I care? But now, I’m starting to wonder about other aspects of parenting – I read an article on The Mom Moment talking about “a working mom’s nightmare” where her child was sick at school/daycare and if she left to pick him up, it would mean that she was letting her work team down on a big project, etc., etc. In contrast, one of my co-workers feels guilty letting her husband (her son’s father) take care of the sick kid even though he has a flexible job where he can stay home more often and she has a regular office job which doesn’t allow that flexibility. I tend to think I’ll be more like the first mom – feeling torn, but ultimately trying to decide what is the best option without letting anyone down.

My BFF is anal retentive about leaving her kids to go out of the house at times. She thinks when she returns to work full time it will be worse. I cannot fathom that. While I don’t think I’ll be like my cousin who left her 4 week old w/ her mother (my aunt) overnight for a weekend of partying (I feel like 4 weeks is too young to have sleepovers, somehow), I also don’t think that I’m going to get emotional every time my kid gets handed over to a responsible, well-known baby-sitter, like my mom or one of my in-laws. I’ve actually already planned what will likely be our first night out after the baby for about 6 weeks after my due date (are you proud? I’m not referring to it as “when the baby is born” since no one knows that sort of info for sure). I’ve already arranged for my mom to babysit (it was an interesting experience realizing that I had to make those sort of arrangements) and told her that I would likely prefer for her to come over so she could put the baby to bed in it’s own space and not to count on the baby staying the night at her house. (which is just as well, since it’s a work night and both Mr. Moose and my mom will likely have to work the next day).

Monday, September 17, 2007

It’s horrible to think this, but every once in awhile when my back starts to ache or get really tense, or I’m leaning over the toilet or my head is pounding every time I inhale – I’d better have a great baby. I always thought being pregnant would be fun. I didn’t think gaining weight would matter to me, though I knew I likely wouldn’t feel sexy, etc. I didn’t think my self image would really make me unhappy, etc. I expected some morning sickness – but I used to get terrible bouts of motion sickness as a child and so early on learned to deal with throwing up and moving on, knowing that I would feel better when it was over. I never expected to not feel uncomfortable or even a little added pain and pressure. But I’m not even half way through this pregnancy, and I’m already aware that I’m really not liking being pregnant. Don’t get me wrong – I’m grateful that I am able to have a baby at all. I know that there is nothing (so far) that I wouldn’t do again if I was promised a healthy baby in the end. But pregnancy fun? Uh uh.

I’ve also started to think about the end of this pregnancy more and more. I’m not dwelling on the “how” yet – though I’ve given some more thought to waiting a little longer to request my epidural, etc. even to see if I can get through the majority of contractions before getting it at all (I’m doubting it, but I might be willing to try – we’ll have to see). But I have to tell you that carrying this baby for 40 or more weeks on the off chance she/he arrives late scares the crap out of me. My sisters 3rd baby was late and in Sweden they don’t induce hardly at all no matter what. I always expected my pregnancies to go like my BFF K – both of her boys came early, but the more I think about it – the more I realize that that is an unrealistic expectation – I have no indication that my pregnancy will end early or any reason to believe it will.

My chest has grown again. One of my favorite bras has been mostly outgrown – it leaves it’s outline on my body when it is removed. Unfortunately, it’s my only black one, so I have to keep wearing it until I have both time and money to go replace it.

I’m struggling with whether or not I want to purchase a pregnancy pillow or not. I really want to, but they seem so expensive to me and I’m afraid that I’ll get it and end up not liking it enough, or something.

I picked out my stroller this weekend and I’m very excited. We haven’t yet purchased it, but I know which one I want and we are going to start budgeting for it. It’s a Graco, middle of the line travel system and I cannot wait to bring it home. I am so proud of myself for hanging in there and doing the research and trying it out, etc. and finally making a decision. Mr. Moose saw it online and agreed with my choice.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

I learned yesterday that an old friend – 21-years-old – died over the weekend. The details are sketchy as to what happened/caused it other than something shocking, physical (not a car accident or murder) and unexpected. She had a loving family and fairly newly wed husband. My first reaction was that of disbelief. My mom called with 3rd or 4th hand news of the death. We weren’t close, but I’ve known her and her sister since they were in nursery school/toddler care at church. And now that she’s been married, I ran into her more often in married circles so that I’ve seen her several times over the last year. When my mom told me I was like “you’ve got it wrong. I just saw her last month!” You never imagine a sudden medical issue to pop up in a 21-yr-old.

It brought up the subject of our own mortality. Mr. Moose and I have been discussing who the guardian of our child will be if something happens to both of us. It’s a hard decision for us, since none of our choices are the perfect ideal situation. Our current choice is one of his sisters who is incredibly responsible and though while not married (or in a serious relationship) would make an excellent parent. My worry for her is that in the case of nothing changing, it would make her a single parent and that none of us know what her future might hold as far as job or spouse, etc. We plan to talk it over with her a little further along in the pregnancy. I know she will be honored, but I don’t know if she will have the same concerns or if she will just simply take it on as a responsibility. We desperately want whomever takes our child in that situation to make sure that my side of the family is still a part of the child’s life.

My doctor’s appointment today went well and I got all my major questions answered. My lack of weight gain is fine and reasonably healthy since I started out overweight to begin with. He also assured me that the changes in my chest area are completely normal, no matter how much it surprised me! I still don’t like it (it feels weird, okay?!), but I feel better about it.

Monday, September 3, 2007

A quick post to give some pregnancy updates, but I'll try and get back in another day or so to recap my weekend in Nashville with the extended in-law family.

I'm still feeling huge, but I still haven't gained anything. Appt w/ doc tomorrow and I plan to ask him about it. I'm not worried, but I feel like in some way I should be gaining now that I'm not throwing up all the time. (Still get gaggy occasionally and feel nauseous, but at least I'm not throwing up every day.) I still can't eat huge meals in one sitting, but I'm hungry more often than I was, i think.

I had a weird experience last night (TMI alert) when getting ready for bed I glanced in the bathroom mirror at my undressed self. My chest, specifically the darker area around my nipples was looking oddly shaped and discolored. When I touched it, it felt solid to my fingers and odd, almost like slightly numb. In my research and discussion on the preggo boards I discovered that my milk ducts are starting to do something and that it's at least slightly normal, though I felt like it was awfully early for all that. (Apparently not). I was really freaked when it happened last night, but I'm calmer now. It feels weird - it's a very odd sensation and I'm concerned that during the course of our playing something is going to leak out onto Mr. Moose, but I'm sure we'll both survive. He's been very sweet and supportive and he had to calm me down last night when I first noticed it.

15 weeks tomorrow and going to the doctor for my monthly check up. I'm a little worried about my first visit w/ the only male doc in the practice (also the head of the practice), but I've been assured that he's very nice. Lots of questions for him...

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

This post will be totally random and all over the place. You have been so warned.

Julia’s Mom Moment post about Patrick’s name and the disasters she’s dealt with regarding him starting school and not answering to his given first name, etc. caught my attention. I’m name obsessed, have been for decades. I used to “collect” names as a kid. I wanted to be a writer and was totally obsessed with having perfect and unusual names for each character. So I have some very strong opinions when it comes to naming, especially my own offspring, so while I did put a rather long comment up for Julia to peruse, I thought I’d share some of my thoughts here, on my own blog.

I’m all for choosing a name with a nickname in mind and planning for the child to grow into the name. I won’t choose a name I won’t use, ever, even if I like the nickname, and I won’t name my child simply the nickname version just because I plan to call him/her that all the time. For example, I love Maddie, but am not crazy about Madison or Madeline. I’d love to name my daughter after my grandmother for sentimental reasons, but I’m not crazy about her name, Lorraine, and while nickname options have been suggested (Raine is my favorite, Lori is another option) I don’t want to give my daughter a name I don’t like and will never use unless angered. Also, I think it’s silly to saddle a kid with a name that is a nickname if the more adult sounding name is just as nice. For instance, don’t legally name a kid “Abby” when Abigail, nn Abby is perfectly fine. I want my child’s name to have options, or to be a name that will grow with age. (Some names don’t have obvious nicknames, and that is fine as long as it will “fit” on a baby as well as an adult. I site “Kirsten” as a perfect example and one that was very high on my list for quite awhile). My BFF, though only ever wants to give her child the name that he/she will be called and that bugged me. Personally, I don’t ever want to answer to my childhood nn ever again. (I’m out of luck, I know as way too many people really only know me as that) and I love that I have a perfectly reasonable, more grown up version to use in it’s place. It also bugs me when people refuse to use the first name they gave to heir children. My MIL, for example was born Barbara L—and was always called by her middle name. She grew up hating her legal first name. Her family never even considered calling her by that first name, so my question is, why ever would you name your child that in the first place? In a case where it is a family name and dad is named the same thing as the son, or whatever, I get the need for the differenciation. That is a different case.

On another blog I read this week (I’m sorry, I cannot remember whose it was and I apologize for forgetting) a pregnant woman mentioned that she is having trouble remembering words during conversations and was worried that she was losing it or something. I have been having that problem, too. Or a mild form of effasia where you mix up words altogether. I think it’s the pregnancy and what it is doing to our bodies.

Oh, my freaking goodness, the BACKACHES. Yesterday it started in the extreme – I’ve always had back troubles, twinges, etc. I love that Mr. Moose is willing and able (and extremely talented) to give me a massage. I read this morning that backaches are one of the curses of pregnancy and last night that was completely true. At one point I swear it was starting to cause numbness in my shoulder blade area. It was freaking AWFUL. It just hit me again and I’ve decided to agree to go to the chiropractor. Anything at this point.

I don’t mean to brag, and I’m still knocking on wood every time I mention this, but I haven’t really thrown up in 4 days. I’m liking that aspect of the 2nd trimester a lot.

Monday, August 27, 2007

I made it through the entire weekend without vomiting once. I wanted to on more than one occasion, but I kept it to myself. I can also happily announce that neither the concept of peeing, nor the act of entering a bathroom is causing me to want to throw anymore. There were several days last week where even the concept of myself peeing (and I’m pregnant, I do that A. Lot.) or anyone else peeing in my vicinity (public bathrooms, anyone?) was enough to make me gag and retch. That particular issue seems to be have moved on and I greatly thank heaven for that blessing.

Work today has truly SUCKED. Everyone is cranky (including me – Mr. Moose has had a snoring festival for 5 nights in a row and I can’t sleep very well through that) and everyone is needy and I just want to go home.

In other news:

I finally decided on which baby bedding to get and my mom is going to get it for me. Mr. Moose is ready to start getting the baby’s room in order and I needed to make that decision in order to choose the paint color.

My friend M (who will eventually be the child care giver for my little bundle) who is approximately 8 weeks ahead of me recently found out that she having a little girl. She is thrilled. This is her third child, she already has one of each. I’m excited for her, as well. I can’t wait to find out what mine will be.

I have begun researching the child birthing and nursing classes offered at my hospital. Turns out that they suggest you take the child birth class beginning somewhere in your 24th-30th week. News to me, though I’m sure by the time you get to 36 weeks, sitting on the floor in the birthing position is harder than it looks. That puts us in a class either beginning just after Thanksgiving or in early December depending on which day of the week we choose.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

It’s been a rough morning already since I had to get blood work done and the receptionist is out (again) with a sick child and I have to cover for her when she is away. (Big sigh) but I got a begonia, a chocolate croissant and cupcakes at work this morning, so hey! It’s shaping up to be a pretty fantastic day!

Seriously thought I was going to loose my breakfast (fresh blueberry muffins made by Mr. Moose) when I was in the car this morning. I managed to control it, but ugh! Yuck!

What is up with the not being able to sleep through the night? Last night I had to contend w/ Mr. Moose’s snoring and he wasn’t being cooperative when I tried to get him to roll over either. But then I thought I felt something tickle my arm, and something on the pillow and I was so sure that there was a bug in bed which then continued to keep me up for awhile. I got a minor bit of heartburn and had to elevate a bit, but I was awake for at least a good hour in the middle of the night where I just couldn’t sleep no matter who tired I was. Ugh. And this was the 3rd night in a row that something like this has occurred. It’s terrible.

My mom and stepfather cooked me dinner last night – homemade Thai food – yum! It was a great evening with them. Mr. Moose was there, too of course. I still don’t know what I want for dinner tonight (I’m having decision-making disorder or something). I’m also feeling very antsy this morning.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Well, the good news is, my morning sickness seems to be slowing down. I threw up this morning at work, but it’s been a few days since it actually came to that. Oddly, I had even had breakfast this morning, owing to the extremely strong waves of nausea I was feeling this morning. Didn’t help. I even hacked up a fair share of acid (the worst thing in my opinion). I’ve been burping up a storm lately, and I feel bad for my officemate.

Monday, August 20, 2007

I’ve been reading several other blogs for over a year now. Several topics came up this week that I would like to mention.

Julie at alittlepregnant had a terrible loss this week. I was amazed and awed at the outpouring of sympathy that was posted in the comments section. When I saw the post where she mentioned it, about a day after it was posted, there were over 800 posts of sympathy. I think it is beautiful that she has had such an impact on so many people over the years as she has chronicled her journey.

Arwen wrote a post about the changes to her preconceived notions and plans in parenting that didn’t really come to fruition. She talked about co-sleeping and long-term nursing and all the things she wrinkled her nose up at before her baby was born and how her thoughts have changed since the baby came. I must say that while I’m sure my thoughts will change in some aspects as I adjust to actually having a baby to deal with instead of just the theories of parenting, however, I’m totally disturbed by the concept of nursing a 3-year-old or having a preschooler still sleeping in the parents’ room every night. I imagine that not being able to be a stay at home mom will prevent/allow me to end nursing when I planned (or there abouts), since our baby will be used to a bottle at least part time (though I do plan to pump and use breast milk during that time in case you’re curious).

Maybe I will be posting in another 18 months or so how my opinions have changed and how I cannot imagine quitting right away or whatever, but I’m totally flabbergasted right now as to the whole concept of some of those issues.

On another subject: Over the weekend, my mom and I spent the better part of Saturday together getting pedicures (my toes look so pretty and my feet are so soft) and make-overs. I had forgotten how much I loved to wear make-up and how much prettier I feel wearing it. A little more than a year ago I purchased Bare Essentials make-up and I loved it, but I have to go across the bay to get more and I haven’t had the money or the effort to refill it lately. I bought some drugstore brand alternative that was okay, but didn’t cover very well and had basically gotten to the point where I just wasn’t putting in the effort any longer. Mom and I spent 2 hours at the Prescriptives counter with a lovely French-Canadian woman who did my make-up and made me look amazing.

I recall being told as a young teen when I first began wearing make-up that I was told that I belonged in warm colors and that eye shadows should be neutral (no blues or purples, etc.) in order to look natural and not like a hooker. This woman “colorprinted” me and actually said that my skintone was a little cooler than I always thought and actually put me in purple eye shadow. I resisted at first, but the base she put me in was so nice that I just let her do what she wanted. The effect was amazing. It was obviously a night-wear look – much more make-up than I would wear to the office, for example, but it was beautiful. Mom bought me the basics, including the eye makeup and I’ve been playing with it the rest of the weekend. It’s not as thick as she put it on, of course, but it still looks great and even Mr. Moose commented on how great I looked. I’m feeling like a new woman!

Saturday, August 18, 2007

So, on Thursday I actually went all day without throwing up even the slightest bit. I was so excited, I also only had the slightest bit of nausea and gagging on my morning commute, so I was doing good! I was starting to think that maybe I had finally gotten past it – maybe I had crossed the line into the 2nd trimester leaving the ook behind.

I was overly confident. I got cocky thinking that 12 weeks, 2 days was my mark.

I threw up this morning while getting dressed for work. The really awful, nothing-in-my-stomach, this-is-just acid kind of throwing up. That seems to be worse than food, in my opinion.

Mr. Moose made me breakfast. “Time for that Eggo?” he asked, nonchalantly.

Tomorrow, I am looking forward to a celebration of sorts. My mom and I are going to get mother/daughter pedicures to celebrate the end of my first trimester. I haven’t had a pedi since my wedding, so I’m looking forward to it. My birthday is also coming up next week, so I’m looking forward to my annual dinner out w/ my daddy in the next 10 days or so (especially since being on this budget, we’ve not been spending nearly the same amount of time in restaurants as we once were). I’m pretty sure I want seafood, but can’t decide which restaurant. My dad is into casual-to-nice sort of places, but he HATES to wait for a table, so some place not crowded or that takes reservations is a must.

Monday, August 13, 2007

I had a migraine on Saturday. Oh, my goodness did it hurt. And all I could do was take Tylenol, avoid light and sound and pray that it would go away. The Tylenol and Coca Cola combo eventually took the edge off. Enough that I was hungry and cranky. And I didn’t want anything w/ peanut butter on it for lunch. Which was pretty much all we had, and all Mr. Moose was really willing to make since he wasn’t exactly hungry.

We’re doing this new budget thing, you see – the Dave Ramsey system? Maybe you’ve heard of it. It involves envelopes and only spending cash and a very detailed budget. I am assured that it works beautifully, and we will be out of debt in about 3 years (with the exception of the mortgage), but meanwhile, I’m having trouble adjusting to the lack thereof of food outings, especially on the weekend, especially when all I really want it a $.89 burrito and WHY can’t I have one? We had a brief argument, which ultimately ended with me raiding our vacation fund and demanding that he go get me some Taco Bell. He did, and while he was gone, I threw up in the toilet, while the dog licked my arm. It was blistering hot all weekend and Mr, Moose kept wanting to sit in the sunroom and play his stupid video game (I hate it. My children will never have a video game console. They are evil). Of course, he wanted to leave the door open to get a little air out there, but all it really succeeded in doing was blowing the hot air in the house and make the AC run non-stop since it wasn’t cooling very effectively. I was grumpy and I felt nasty and I just wanted my husband to stop being cranky, too.

BIG SIGH. Everything ended up being fine and we accomplished the rearranging of the furniture in our bedroom to more comfortably allow me to sleep on my left side. I’m now on the other side of the mattress, so I haven’t gotten comfortable yet. I’m so tired.

And I desperately want to take tomorrow off work and avoid my Tuesday responsibilities… we shall see.

Friday, August 10, 2007

WARNING: GRAPHIC DETAILS OF MY TUMMY PYROTECHNICS TO FOLLOW. IF YOU ARE WEAK STOMACHED, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Wednesday night, Mr. Moose made an excellent dinner of grilled salmon, green beans and mashed potatoes. Yum. I love the marinade he used and I thoroughly enjoyed my meal, though I wasn’t especially hungry and had been feel “off” all afternoon and into the evening. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what was wrong accept to describe that my body felt “heavy” and that I was incredibly tired. During dinner, my dad came by to show off his new “toy”: a 2006 Corvette in Sunset Orange. It was very nice and he was as excited as a kid to show it off. I asked where he was going to put the car seat.

We went about our evening doing a few chores and scraping and crushing pseudo-oreos to make dirt cake for his work even the next day (I seriously think someone needs to start marketing crushed Or*eo in a bag to save me and others like me an hour of scraping the filling off and crushing the chocolately cookies, but who am I to say.)

Long story short, after staying up later than usual because I was just so incredibly uncomfortable, I sacrificed my partially digester dinner to the porcelin god, over and over for several minutes until there was nothing left. Mesquite grilled salmon makes neither a tasty or pleasant looking offering, let me assure you.

Mostly I’ve been hacking up just liquid the last day or so – they say that pregnant women begin to create excess saliva (why? I don’t know) and as I gag, much of that seems to flow forward.

This morning my “breakfast” was a combination of hot cocoa and Cheez-It Reduced Fat Crackers. Bad idea. After trying to find something else in the fridge to add, and throwing out my week-old forgotten hardboiled egg, I raced to the restroom only to hack up that as well. Bad combo when tasted together with stomach ook.

The post-lunch sickness was partially digested broccoli cheddar soup. Really unpleasant the second time around, thank you very much.

On non-disgusting news, last night Mr. Moose and I went to the mall and purchased on fake wedding band for me to wear now that I have outgrown my own. I can finally wear my engagement ring again, albeit on my pinkie finger. The band/engagement ring didn’t fit properly on my pinkie together and so I had just been wearing the band by itself, though I love my engagement ring. However, this looked less like a wedding band and more like a pinkie ring and with my ever-growing midsection, I am self-conscious that I look not married. So I finally “look married” again and I’m happy.

I’m hoping to “invest” in a picture account soon. Maybe you’ll even get pictures of me out of the deal.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Well, now. We saw the baby’s heartbeat on a quickie ultrasound yesterday. I didn’t get beats per minute, so I have no idea if it was fast or slower. She couldn’t get the sound on the Doppler, so u/s it was. The pictures are nothing to look at, it was better on the screen. Our dear little Kremit was actually starting to look like a human instead of a lima bean.

I’m craving vegetables. Maybe my Gramma is practicing voodoo on me while she’s laid up after her shoulder surgery. But last night all I wanted was the green beans Mr. Moose made and this morning I was actually dreaming about a salad. I’d kill for some Thai food – all those nice, crispy veggies! Yum! I guess it’s a good thing that I’m craving healthy stuff (especially after all I wanted for days was junk – French fries and chicken nuggets and burritos, oh my!)

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

You seem to naturally know a lot about parenting, and you know what kids need.You can tell when it's time to let kids off the hook, and when it's time to lay down the law.While your parenting is modern and hip, it's not over the top.You know that there's nothing cool about a parent who acts like a teenager... or a drill sergeant!

You are White ChocolateYou are sweet, caring, and truly very innocent.Whether your naive ways are a bit of act or not, people like to take care of you.You are a quiet flirt, and your power is often underestimated!

Saturday, August 4, 2007

This is the third post I’ve started in about a week. They have all been a list of complaints and I decided not to bother posting them. However…This week (Monday, primarily) we rearranged the office I work in. We’re talking about 1800 square ft. with an assortment of various office and cubical spaces. We moved 3 people in and moved nearly everyone else around. I was in charge of coordinating the move and the movers. I’m tired. I’m typically ready to go home every day at 3:00. I tried to get a bit of a nap in today during my lunch break, and it may have helped. I still want to go home, but at least I don’t feel as if I’m nodding off. I now have an office w/ a door that is not made of glass and so when I close it, it affords some privacy.

The morning sickness has been worse this week, and now I’m wondering if my progesterone supplements were actually helping to control my morning sickness instead of contributing to it. Ah well.

Next Monday I have a Dr.’s appointment and we should be able to hear the baby’s heartbeat. I’m very excited. Of course, the appointment is at an ungodly hour of 7:30 am, but I shall survive.

SSBB

About Me

I love baby names and I love studying pop culture - specifically how popular literature, movies and TV effect our view of the world. So why not take a look at how pop culture effects the popularity of baby naming?