World went crazy; media portraying her as serious, viable, and reasonable

Sarah Palin still a household name; world not big enough for two prominent women in politics

…her crazy eyes are just a hypnotism tool and their powers take hold by primary season

Sarah Palin

Recently released Governor’s office emails are too long to actually read, successfully burying her racist rants

Learned the hard way that media fact checks made up statements

…half the country preemptively moves to Canada

Herman Cain

Avoided having to re-pay all donations by successfully keeping all of his speeches 30 minutes of less

Running out of crazy shit to say

…a series of tragic events befall all other candidates

Jon Huntsman

Is occasionally remembered by people who follow 2012 politics

People keep criticizing his campaign logo, because that’d the only thing anyone knows about him

…people fear getting on his bad side when he convinces voters “Huntsman” isn’t his last name, it’s an accurate nickname

Rick Santorum

His name is not yet bleeped out on network television

His face is now considered a trigger on suicide-prevention websites

…hipsters decided to be reallyironic

Tim Pawlenty

Has not suffered a bad headline

Has not actually had a headline

…eh, probably has a good chance

They also did a similar rundown at the end of March, and everything has changed since then. As everyone knows, even 24 hours is a very long time in politics, let alone a few months. So don’t take what any pundit says about who is going to win the Republican nomination very seriously.

This was written by Iron Knee. Posted on Thursday, July 7, 2011, at 12:05 am. Filed under Irony. Tagged Elections, Republicans. Bookmark the permalink. Follow comments here with the RSS feed. Both comments and trackbacks are currently closed.