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Melody of love?

October 2006

Sheila Walker offers a view of the film Heading South

Do you remember the Beatles’ song “Can’t Buy Me Love”? It
was brought back to mind when I recently went to see the film
Heading South – a story set in the 70’s, dealing with a
subject which is both current and, for many people, unpleasant.

The basis of the plot is the story of relatively wealthy
white women who become ‘sex tourists’, enjoying the company
and charms of the virile young Haitian men. The transaction was,
in many respects, simple. However, as with most apparently
uncomplicated arrangements involved with relationships, it
carried problems that had major repercussions.

The women were certainly looking for sex – middle-aged,
but still with charms and needs with which they were not fully
satisfied in their day-to-day lives. They were able, and
willing, to pay the cost of enjoying the company that was very
happy indeed to meet those needs.

The setting was part of the charm – a holiday spot with
wonderful weather and beaches, a certain ‘foreign-ness’ in the
language used (French and Creole). This was a relaxed
atmosphere, far removed from home territory and reality of daily
lives, with easy relationships between the young black men and
white middle-aged women which would have been impossible in home
communities. The ‘payment for services’ whether in money or in
gifts, was discreetly carried out, preserving the dignity of
both parties. Pleasure provided, gratitude shown - a carefree
arrangement, with no strings attached - it could seem a harmless
holiday fantasy.

The real needs

It is easy to condemn this kind of activity. Without a
doubt it is predatory, demeans the young people involved and
corrupts those who are economically obliged to turn to selling
their bodies as the one viable asset they possess. Personal
‘needs’ can be no excuse, and this judgement applies equally to
men and women whatever their sexual preferences.

The film also depicts the need which especially affects women
in middle age. The delight to be found in feeling once more
desirable to an attractive stranger, the relaxed beach parties
which recall carefree youth, the bolster for failing self-esteem
in terms of sexual attraction: these are powerful temptations,
especially if the ‘partner’ is very willing to go along with
this scenario.

Where is love?

The premise of the film is that the whole affair is
temporary. It can reoccur annually, and it does; but the
entire relationship is based upon the fact that there is no
commitment on either side. Exclusivity is neither given nor
expected.
Problems arise, however, when the latest arrival seeks love.
This alteration in the established practice of the women proves
to be the factor which damages the relationships within the
group and ultimately proves to be the trigger for tragedy. The
problem lies in achieving a genuine separation of emotion from
the meeting of needs and appetites. The seeker of love is the
one who spoils the ‘paradise’ that has been superficially
created.

In our time

The film looks back some thirty years, but the
problems and situations it deals with are still a part of our
lives. We are familiar with sad stories of young girls being
vulnerable to the ‘sex trade’, but we must apply the same
standards to both men and women, neither condemning nor
condoning according to sex.

I recently spoke to a serious, troubled, Moroccan about
the impact of tourism as he saw it. He was sad at the influence
of ‘foreign ladies’ upon the youth around him. Far too aware of
the impropriety of being explicit, he nevertheless indicated
that easy money and easy virtue were a great temptation to
attractive young men.

Today we are all far better informed of the health
implications of sexual promiscuity than we were in the past.
Equally, greater licence is the norm. However, the notion that,
since sex is a driving force, to experience desire is to have
the absolute right to satisfaction is questionable on ethical as
well as safety grounds.

The right to judge

Heading South depicts a genuine problem, but
offers neither solution nor judgement. Many of us would like to
feel more attractive, to recapture some of the carelessness of
youth, to be generous in response to mutual pleasure given by a
companion. These wishes are normal, and surely not to be
condemned.

And yet… and yet… Have we the right to be judgemental? On
the other hand, have we the right to show tolerance without
limits?

I felt a little sad on leaving the cinema – perhaps the
background music should have moved on from vivacious Caribbean
rhythms to the more plaintiff notes of “Love for Sale”.