Pages

JB

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

The Problem of it Finally Being Winter

Don’t get me wrong, I am a sucker for that winter wonderland sort of scene. Hot chocolate extra whipped cream (with a bit of baileys), Ice Skating, white blanket like covered grounds, perfect cuddle weather and that slight bit of romantic snow fall. However this never seems to be the case, especially not here in London. Here the wonders of winter include, ice cold weather, heavy rain storms and even more pissed off people packing the public transportation system than usual. As much as I can appreciate the aesthetics of winter (or the Idillic hypothetical winter that supposably occurs in Europe) the closet technicality behind it is a nightmare. The logic put into a days worth of clothes equals that of one week during summer. Having to think so much to not freeze your limbs limits my innovation, and the added coat factor pisses me off, just as well right? I’ll fit in with all the other mopey and unhappy travellers trekking hell through the public transportation system. Seriously, who does the heating for the London Underground? The unbearable heat I feel when I wear my winter coat on the tube always makes me want to through a bikini party with margaritas, fake sand and palm trees (while we’re at it might as well change the seats to beach chairs) Can that company do the heating for my apartment? Pretty Please?Besides the bitchy coat issue that always pretty much ruins an outfit and gets in the way of life (by getting stuck on doorknobs or by ripping out your hair) no one has known hell on earth better than the women of tights. I love dresses, I love skirts, and I love my naturally long nails no matter what the weather. These are definitely three things that should be banned during winter if you dare to try them together. So for this winter to avoid further unhappy commutes I decided to create a pro’s and con’s list to see if I can get around the long nails&tights VS. Winter issue:Reasons why Tights are Hell:

My Long nails always end up ripping them up before I get to class

Tights always suddenly decide they don’t like the length of your hem line and decide to become a low hung crotch hem them self. #attentionwhore (something you can't fix in public in a classy manner)

In case you figure out a way for them not to peek out below your hem line, the attention whore tights find a way to ride up and pop out between your crop top and skirt.

At 20 I still “can’t” dress my self for winter as the colour of the tights dictate the apparent status of wether your cold or not (black tights in public nobody questions your current body temperature, wear sheer tights and you’re completely nuts)

The eventual hole that your shoes rub in at the foot of your tights becomes a vacuum that attracts all of your toes at once in an uncomfortable sensation.

The tights create friction and like to give you electric shocks. Not of the good kind.

The tights will argue with you (on certain material items) on where the skirt should be placed. I want it to cover my butt, my tights love to let that hem like ride up every five minutes. That lower booty cleavage is an even bigger no no then upper booty cleavage or flashing your thong.

The fact that I need to save extra tote space on important days (which bumps out snacks) for a spare set of tights knowing that me and the tights won’t agree and they’ll decide to break.

Reasons Why Tights are ok:

I get to wear my dresses and skirts.

So seriously if you have any tips and tricks on wearing dresses in the winter without the constant hell called tights, let me know!

10 comments:

This sounds ridiculous but a solution for #2 is to wear a second thong over your tights! This keeps the crotch area from falling :D can get a bit ridiculous though if anyone is going to see you get out of the clothes.

Dear Lotta! I know this problem with tights so much. I am transgendered and do not have such a hourglass figure and therefore my tights are always sliding down. I solve this problem wearing a shapewear girdle or body.

I love skirts and dresses too and i love the silky feeling of high quality tights ...