Greenville College IT department purchases new VX6 module

Posted Friday, April 1st, 2011

With a gracious grant from the Technology for Students Foundation, the Greenville College Information Technology department was able to purchase a slightly used VX6 module from the United States Government “old tech” auction. With this new piece of technical equipment, the IT department will be able to increase the computational limits on all campus computers as well as process work orders up to 3 times as fast.

VX6 front end

VX modules (VX stands for Volt Xoccula) have been crucial pieces of technology in the evolution of technology on the whole. For the uninitiated, the VX6 module may sound like a load of techno-babble, but understanding a bit about this module is fundamental in the evolution of computers and technology. The first VX module (VX1) developed by a team Dutch engineers, led by Dr. Hans Rudolphus Knopflemeier, was designed to systematically draw correlations between various active points in a statistically unbalanced chemical markup, in order to reduce reactivity in its final solution. This is done by using deltas. The higher the delta the machine can function on, the more efficiently it can draw correlations based on corroborating separate inconsistencies in pressurized environments. In order to do this without failure, the machine must achieve its prime vector. Of course, it can also be used to solve physical logic problems, or make music and light displays from scratch. The productions of these delta waves have been used for a wide variety of situations and experiments in the world of Engineering and the Computational sciences, such as the discovery of Yalgeth’s limit (.88 Delta), the Hans-Rodenheim Law of Vectoral Momentum, and of course the Armistan Codex.

The previously purchased VX6 module may seem like a looming mystery, but actually, the interworking’s of the device are simple enough. The VX6 module has the aesthetics of a large computer with several interchangeable commercial parts. The VX6 module purchased by Greenville College IT is a model XL-D430 Alpha and comes with several interesting instruments such as an Alpha Refraction Caulculator, Deconstituational Flux Valve, and most importantly, the Seperational R-Regulator (which runs at a steady 53,000 TSI).

Deconstituational Flux Valve

It is the goal of the Greenville College IT Department to use the newly purchased VX6 module as a teaching tool as well as a productive piece of the college’s infrastructure. When the VX6 is in use, it will be at all times producing a minimum of .35 delta and at most .88 delta (don’t worry, silicone disruptor chip is double shielded to prevent leakage.) Due to the standard safety procedures provided in the VX6 safety manual (V.4.1.16), authorized by the the Heinrich-Heine-University Dusseldorf Engineering department, the VX6 module can only run for a total of 98,000 cycles before it needs to have the regulatory shutdown schedule completed and the cooling mechanism cleaned. In this down time Computer science and pre-engineering students will have the chance to observe the regulatory sanitization to the J-filter on the port side of the module.

decontinental Flux Drive

Finally, the VX6 module will provide Greenville College with a variety of new opportunities to advance scientifically and technologically. With the VX6 module, students will be able to learn real world skills concerning the VX6 modules workability and gain experience with Marginal Spectrum Analyzer and the Telescopic Reactor Drive. Students, make sure to sign up for available time slots for your chance at hitting .88 Delta!

I am a recent grad of Greenville College with a B.A. emphasizing in philosophy. I was hired onto the GC IT Crew in March 2010 as a Support Tech. Outside of work I spend most of my time with my wife, Shannan, reading, or nerding out with my friends.

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I have been a member of the IT Department since 1999 and currently serve as the Assistant Director of IT. Interests outside of work include spending time with my wife, Crissy, and two young children. An avid movie watcher, Netflix is considered a basic utility at our home. On weekends in the summer you may find me outside trying to hone my bbq skills while enjoying a St. Louis Cardinals game on the tube.

I am a 2010 Greenville College with a B.S. in History Education (I know, right?) I started working at the Help Desk in January 2009, and was hired full time as a Support Technician in May 2010. Any time I am not Support Technicianing, I like to hang out with my wife, Jordan. I am a soccer enthusiast, I enjoy general internet LOLZ, and I am passionate about shooting/editing video.

I am a recent grad of Greenville College with a B.A. emphasizing in philosophy. I was hired onto the GC IT Crew in March 2010 as a Support Tech. Outside of work I spend most of my time with my wife, Shannan, reading, or nerding out with my friends.