What are you up to this weekend? We’re taking the boys to Coney Island, and they’re also very seriously planning a lemonade stand. Can we just take a moment to acknowledge that summer is just so much better than winter? Hope you have a relaxing one, and here are a few fun links from around the web…

Says Kelly on weekend links: “I read a flight attendant memoir (which I hoped would be dishy but was instead insipid), but I did learn to take your arms off the armrests when you’re feeling turbulence. My impulse is to really grip the seat, but if you put your arms in your lap you feel the motion a lot less and it’s less scary.”

Says Louisa on secrets to hosting overnight guests: “1. A grocery list ready in case you run out to pick up some things to eat. 2. Some books to read my toddler while I sleep in. 3. An empty washing machine, but you’ll need to fold the clothes that are in the dryer. 4. A list of people who will be coming by today because someone is finally home during work hours: the plumber, electrician, and some guy from Craigslist who wants our highchair. 5. A list of restaurants I’ve been dying to try but am too cheap.”

Says Aileen on what to say to a grieving friend: “I lost my dad 13 years ago, and when a friend asked me if there was anything she could do, I said the bathroom and kitchen needed cleaning as my mother and I had to go to the undertaker and we had family arriving. My mother was mortified that I had actually given her a job, but my friend was grateful since she had felt so helpless. When we came back, not only had she done the kitchen and bathroom, she had dusted and hoovered the living room and made all the beds. She was amazing.”

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I’ve got to thank you for featuring Ben Casnocha’s article about beginning things when you’re “almost ready.” I have been with my fiancee for nine and a half years, and we’ve been engaged for almost three, but I have put off even beginning to plan our wedding because I just never felt 100% ready. Either I hadn’t lost enough weight to go dress shopping, we weren’t financially secure enough, I didn’t feel mature enough to be taking such a big leap, etc, etc…but after reading Ben’s article, it clicked. I will never be 100% ready, or have achieved the self-imposed milestones I gave myself, to get married, but I HAVE felt for so long that I’m *almost* ready. With that being said, the wedding planning has finally commenced! Now I’m stressed but giddy, and wondering why I put it off for so long :)

The “Leap when you’re almost ready” really resonated with me. I’m at a point in my life where I am almost ready for many things, starting a family being the biggest (my husband is ready whenever I am). I keep thinking I will wake up one day and be ready, and I keep telling myself “xyz needs to happen first”, but I’m realizing that might not be the case for me. This might be as ready as I’ll ever be, and maybe there will always be something else that needs to happen first. Any advice or experience from others?

This seemed as good a place as any to post this so here goes… I have really been in need of some motherly advice. My mom died when I was a kid and reading this blog has helped me a lot with absorbing bits and pieces of things a mom might say but if you ever felt like doing a post that compiles all that advice… you’d have at least one very thankful reader!

I’m so confused by Louisa’s comment–I went to read the original post, and I still can’t figure out if the tips are for the guest or the host. Who’s running out to get the groceries? A stack of books to read your toddler while you are sleep in? How do you read and sleep in at the same time? And I’m guessing the having to fold the clothes in the dryer is a joke.

I think the whole comment was intended to be a joke – kind of like “oh there are going to be extra people here? Sweet, now you/we can get to all these things with the extra sets of hands.” I had to re-read it to pick up on that, but now find it sort of brilliant!

July 31, 2017 12:32pm /

Kim L says...

Same! I thought surely I’m missing something?

August 1, 2017 12:01am /

aga says...

I really find it hard to believe that in 2017 the Bachelor is a show that exists and that so many women are willing to watch it. I know that the generation watching was brought up on prince-charming fairy tales, and weddings are a $50 BILLION dollar industry in the US even though 50-ish% divorce, but still, i find it hard to wrap my brain around the popularity of the Bachelor.

OMG SAME. I always feel like I’m the only person who thinks this! Like, ok, MAYBE as pure entertainment value… but do people really think that these are genuine love stories? Real confused over here.

July 31, 2017 1:24pm /

keri says...

Joanna – if at anytime you want to compile your best parenting advise you’ve learned from the web and your own personal experience, put it in a book and sell it to me… I’ll be all over that! I will save it until I have kids and then I will read it religiously! You post the most insightful things.

Also… I’ve been skydiving.. there was a rubber chicken hanging in the plane – the only chicken allowed…. and I had no choice once I was strapped to the instructor.. he basically threw me out of the plane

I’ve become so crazy about sunscreen the past few years with all of the info out there from levels of carcinogens (our skin soaks up 80% of what we put on it) to how they bleach corals and destroy fragile ocean ecosystems. I wonder how this Trader Joe’s one one rates on the Environmental Working Group list?

Last year when my Fiance’s father passed, the family all descended on the family home for 10 days. I’m close with them but, of course, was still new and somewhat an outsider. Being allowed to clean, and help with memorial planning tasks that others felt overwhelmed by was so helpful for me. Cleaning is my stress relief and it was good to feel productive and useful during such a hard time.

People brought tons of food, which was fantastic, but what blew us away was everyone who brought paper plates/cups/napkins, toilet paper, garbage bags and such. It was so nice to minimize dishes, and not think about the essentials, especially when there were so many people in and out of the house everyday.

On the grieving friend topic, we have a girlfriend who recently was diagnosed with Chron’s disease. It was brutal for her during the diagnosis process. My friends and I pitched in and sent my house cleaner her way. She said it was the best thing ever, especially with a visit from her out-of-town mom on the horizon.

Love love love the article about teaching teenagers about sex! I come from a pretty liberal background but I still didn’t feel like I was given the honest facts about what starting to have sex would be like. Thanks!

I didn’t see last week’s list but I tell everyone I meet to read The Fear of Flying. I wiuld get my self in such a panic when I flew it was unbearable. I would almost fainted and hyperventilate. I read that book and flew to Hawaii, over the ocean (which was my biggest fear) with NO TROUBLE! It was amazing. There was even really bad tuberulance on the way home and I couldn’t have cared less.

Total Bummer you promote a product that contains a known neurotoxin. As your lathering on your cheap silky smooth Trader Joe’s Sunscreen keep in mind it contains phenoxyethanol the ninth most common allergen on patch tests. And the FDA has advised it can be toxic to infants potentially causing vomiting and diarrhea. There are so many other better brands out there- yep they cost more but my kids are worth forfeiting a latte or two for safer health and hygiene products.

we use mineral sunscreens on the kids, but i want a sunscreen that goes on more smoothly. i’ve read a ton about the various pros and cons and feel fine about this choice. but for a mineral sunscreen, we really like the honest company. thank you so much!

July 30, 2017 10:02am /

Trisha says...

I use this sunscreen on myself and love how smooth it goes on!

July 31, 2017 7:59am /

dana says...

Have you tried the sunblock from Elta MD? It’s kinda spendy, but it’s completely worth the cost. It’s a mineral sunblock but it goes on smooth and doesn’t leave a white cast behind (at least it doesn’t on my pale skin). It looks good under makeup and doesn’t make me breakout or make my already sensitive skin more irritated. Plus, I never burn when I wear it unlike some of the other kinds I’ve tried over the years. It’s magical.

July 31, 2017 11:26am /

Elizabeth says...

I pick our sunscreen based on the info from the Environmental Working Group (http://www.ewg.org/). Scary stuff in sunscreen that increases our risk of cancer and threatens our reproductive abilities.

I loved the sex advice! Her natural way of approaching the subject is so refreshing and so lacking in so many conversations on the topic. She did that young lady such a service. One thing I would have added, and I would love to see people start telling young women, sex shouldn’t hurt. Not the first time, not any time. If a woman is properly primed for sex, and there are no underlying medical problems, it will not be painful.
I have seen it a thousand times in popular culture and it breaks my heart. We need to empower young women about their bodies and teach them how they prepare for sex so they can feel strong enough to speak up and slow down until they are physically ready.

Love that advice piece. Having grown up a Mormon girl, and having had about as little education about sex when I headed to BYU, I wish I could travel back in time and hand myself a copy of that (but also not feel too guilty to read it…)!

I grew up in an LDS Southern Californian home and am still LDS. The sex education I got at school in Orange County was EXCELLENT. Sometimes I think parents being embarrassed about talking about sex is just from a lack of their own sex education (maybe this is what’s happening in Utah?). The weirdest, most enlightening thing I ever did (once I devoured every teen book/magazine on sex and asked my mom every question I felt comfortable asking) was take a college-level sex ed class at CSULB. The information I learned there made my own temple marriage (to another virgin) as fun as possible during those fun and awkward first few months.

I knew it! I just knew that when I clicked on that sunscreen link it would be Trader Joe’s. I listen to too many US podcasts and read too many US blogs because everything I hear is how amazing Trader Joe’s is, and we don’t have it here! I want in on the trail mix and chunky guacamole and, actually, a sunscreen that doesn’t make my face hate me.

Is it too much to hope for that a US-UK trade deal is 1% chlorine-washed chicken and 99% Trader Joe’s?

I really appreciate the article about Cathrine. Thank you for linking to that. And Cathrine, if you are reading this, I am so sorry for the stress you’ve had to endure this week when you are serving our country so loyally. Thank you for your service. Thank you for your commitment. Thank you for your class. I wish you nothing but a long career (of your choice) and the knowledge of what a gift you are every day of your life.

I can not fully tell you how much I look forward to your weekend roundup posts!! Once I see it posted, it’s like I can breathe a sigh of relief and feel like the weekend has officially begun. It’s kind of become this way that I think the weekend has kicked off!! Excited, per usual, to see the post at the end of this long week! Thanks, as always.

Yep! When my mom died and people asked what they could do, if I knew they were serious, I asked them to clean or run errands for me. The best was the people who just did things for us without asking, because asking me what you can do creates work and mental strain. My best friend brought over groceries. She didn’t ask what we wanted, she just got the basics and some fancy treats and it was a godsend. My neighbor who I barely knew also brought over a fresh baked lasagne without asking.

Also something I found incredibly irritating was people who lived long distance asking me if they should come to the funeral. I was like…. if you want? The best was actually the people who didn’t come for the funeral, but came a few weeks after to visit instead. At that point, when everyone else had moved on, I really needed a lift.

I was irritated by people asking if they should come too. Either come or don’t, either way at that point in time, I really didn’t care. The only person I didn’t mind was my BFF from Uni. She lived in Baku and didn’t know what she should do. I told her to stay at home (We live in Scotland) as I would much rather she spent the money on coming to see me at a far more fun time!

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