If I have to message him and tell him to leave her alone then I will tell her to block his number and block him on facebook. I should also note that she is not friends with him on facebook and he is going out of his way to contact her.

I really really trust her and don't believe that she would be doing something behind my back. I will also note that he is 4 hours away from her and the chances of them getting together further are slim to none.

I have asked her and dug for as many answers as I can find and she has always told me that she will not see him and she does not want anything to do with him.

I've been tindering like a mother ******. The thing does wonders...just gotta pick one of the like 12 girls I've hung out with off that thing and pick one.

__________________

Quote:

Originally Posted by 49erNation85

I wouldn't be sir prized if he passed McCoy on the depth chart. I think he might have a better arm and accurate arm then him from the highlights I thought. He also got some wheels too help us prepare for QB's as Wilson , RG3 and other runners etc.

I dont think you would have to say something anyway bc you can easily block someone from facebook. A text messasge is very easy to ignore or you can block the # im sure. Since they are 4 hours away they will not run into each other so problem solved.

So I have a question. My girlfriend has a problem with one of her exes that won't leave her alone. He keeps messaging her on facebook and she keeps ignoring/ telling him to leave her alone. It has been going on for almost 4 months now. She asked me this morning if he continues to harass her if I could step in and say something to him.

What would I say in this case? Something along the lines of "it makes girlfriend and I feel uncomfortable when you message her and both she and I would appreciate it if you would stop."?

It's not that it really bothers me that he is talking to her, she has made it pretty clear that she does not want him bothering her (he also has her phone number and has received text messages from him). I do honestly think that he is trying to make amends with her and seek forgiveness, but she doesn't want to forgive him after what he did to her. Especially considering that every time this sort of thing happens and she gives in and sees him it escalates to something more physical (she has never cheated on me), but this guy is persistent.

Any ideas/ advice on what to say?

First of all I'd be curious as to how old each one of you are. How long the she was dating the X. How long she was single (if at all) between the X and you. Those can make a difference.

I'm the the type that's either fully committed or a casual **** buddy. I've been in two relationships that have occupied about seven years of my life. I've never dealt with anything quite like this, but kinda similar with my first girlfriend.

She was dating this POS for about four or five years before me. She said they were constantly on and off. We started talking during their "off month". She was 19 and he was like 28. He was a complete POS and loser who started dating a 15 year old at the age of like 23. That's beside the point, but just to paint a picture.

When we started dating he tried getting back together with her. She told him she was really done this time and that she had moved on. I'm not the type that gives a **** about ex-boyfriends. I'd rather not know anything. I don't believe in sharing the number of sex partners or any gory details. I don't really give a ****. I can talk to a girl who I have no interest in about that ****, but not my girlfriend. Anyway, she would tell me that he was constantly texting her and saying he missed her. Calling her nonstop. And that she would eventually answer and talk to him. Now she was 19. A little naive and a little too nice, which was part of the reason why I eventually broke up with her. I eventually needed someone a little more grown up.

But she asked me what she should do to get him to stop. I just stared at her. She got my point. I shouldn't have to tell a girl how to tell someone to stop texting or calling them. I don't have Facebook and know nothing about that so I couldn't give advice if I wanted to. But it's pretty easy to block phone numbers and I'm under the impression that it's even easier to block people on Facebook. I've blocked phone numbers.

Quick story. I was banging this 34 year old (huge, wonderful tits) and she would call and text me during work constantly. To the point where I had to answer during work and yell at her to stop. Eventually it wasn't worth the hassle. I gave her a goodbye bang and blocked her number without warning. Never heard from her again. Very simple solution for an annoying ***** who didn't get the picture.

I figure it should be the same way with a guy. I do realize guys are a little more persistent. And a lot of guys who act this way want to feel like they can be with another girl, then get back with their ex while their ex is dating someone else. I think it gives guys a boost of confidence. Instead of finding someone new and moving on they get off on stealing girls away. It makes them feel special.

But eventually he just started being an asshole. He had this app that changed his number when he called her. And he would call like 50 times in 20 minutes. And the number on her phone would show up as her parents house phone. Eventually I took his number and called him nonstop from a blocked number at all hours of the day. 4 am 5 am 7 pm, you ******* name it. He got numerous phone calls until we had a little chat. I can't remember much from the conversation, but I told him that he didn't have **** on me. She would tell me things like I was her best sex partner and somehow he was brought up and she told me he had a small *****. Didn't ask for this information, but I did use it during our phone call. He must have gotten pissed off or embarrassed because he didn't call or text back while we were together.

Quote:

Originally Posted by vikes_28

so back to my original question, what should I say to the guy?

You shouldn't have to say anything. Her asking you if you would say something sounds rather teenage-ish to me. If you want to say something then be upfront: "You need to stop texting, calling or trying Facebook MY girlfriend". That's all that needs to be said.

__________________

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scott Wright

I honestly believe Reggie Bush has turned into exactly the type of player I envisioned.

Quote:

Originally Posted by PossibleCabbage

I would like it if there were more successful black Quarterbacks in the NFL...

Quote:

Originally Posted by bearsfan_51

iamcandian lives in a cabin in the Yukon Territory and writes letters to railroad barons about the price of hard tack.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GatorsBullsFan

I could possibly see Matthew Stafford Dropping out of the 1st round

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoRavens

Tahj Boyd has the best fundamentals of any QB in this class, I think his game translates great to the NFL.

but what good will come out of that? that will allow her time to get over me, and maybe even if she still is talking to him, back to wanting to be with him.

I don't see a good path at all in this

You should always give a girl enough rope to hang themselves. That's my rule. I'm the furthest thing from a controlling type, but you have to allow someone else to screw it up. If you allow her the opportunity to cheat, and they don't, then you can begin to trust the relationship. If you give them opportunity to cheat and they do cheat or start talking to an ex or showing signs they might be considering cheating, then you don't trust the relationship and you break up with her sooner rather than later. The most important thing with any relationship is trust. Not love. Trust. Without trust you're setting yourself up for a lot pain. Love is secondary. There's always someone else out there.

I don't know if you really are in love, how old you are, how many partners who've had or if you're like one my buddies that just falls in love with every girl he starts talking to after a week. But it's not easy. It's not easy breaking up with someone you've been with for a year or two, let alone someone you really do love and care about it.

That's why people stay in **** relationships far longer than they should. Fear of being single. People start to become dependent on having someone, even if they're miserable together. It's just a waste of time and delaying the inevitable.

__________________

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scott Wright

I honestly believe Reggie Bush has turned into exactly the type of player I envisioned.

Quote:

Originally Posted by PossibleCabbage

I would like it if there were more successful black Quarterbacks in the NFL...

Quote:

Originally Posted by bearsfan_51

iamcandian lives in a cabin in the Yukon Territory and writes letters to railroad barons about the price of hard tack.

Quote:

Originally Posted by GatorsBullsFan

I could possibly see Matthew Stafford Dropping out of the 1st round

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoRavens

Tahj Boyd has the best fundamentals of any QB in this class, I think his game translates great to the NFL.

First of all I'd be curious as to how old each one of you are. How long the she was dating the X. How long she was single (if at all) between the X and you. Those can make a difference.

I'm 22, almost 23, she is 20, just turned 20 in the last two months. I'm 3 years older than she is.

I should have used the term "Ex" a bit more loosely. He's not really an ex per se, but they had a physical relationship with each other while he was in another relationship. The story basically goes she didn't want anything to do with him since he was in a relationship and he was persistent and pushed her into it. When I say physical, I mean high school stuff. Not sex (I was her first). The last time she had a "fling" with him was about a month and a half before we met, about two months before we started dating.

I think for now, he has gotten the message that she doesn't want anything to do with him, but we'll see if he continues. If he does I will step in and make her block him. I'll use the "I would feel way more comfortable with the situation if you just blocked him" card.

Vikes, you shouldn't have to "make" her do anything. She should have done these things on her own. However, she is also 20 and lacks the capacity to understand consequences for her actions. Physiologically, that part of the human brain gets shut off around age 13 and turned back on anywhere from 20-25, depending on the person.

Fact is, her continuing to talk to or interact with this clown indicates that she doesn't take your commitment seriously. The easiest way to communicate with most women is emotionally. That means you need to make her understand your feelings on the subject. For instance, "when I hear you have been in touch with this dbag, it makes me feel like I can't trust you and that you don't take our relationship seriously." Substitute any specifics you might need. You need to make her comprehend that what she has kept doing is damaging and that you will not accept it any longer.

You don't have to be super aggressive about it, but you do have to be assertive. State clearly what you want and need from her. Use your feelings to help her understand your thinking. Listen to what she says and stay in the moment. Don't fly off the handle or react impulsively. Make sure she feels heard and make reasonable adjustments to your wants based on what she says and asks of you. However, NEVER adjust your needs for anyone.

My impression isn't that vikes is particularly upset by her interactions with the guy, but that his gf IS upset that the guy keeps bothering her and is asking for his help. It's a bit different than what we've seen in this thread recently.

My impression isn't that vikes is particularly upset by her interactions with the guy, but that his gf IS upset that the guy keeps bothering her and is asking for his help. It's a bit different than what we've seen in this thread recently.

Ok here's one...there's a guy I know through my roommate. I've been to his house and hung out with him but I wouldn't say he's a close friend. Well I got a message on Facebook from his girlfriend telling me she needed someone to talk to. Apparently he's been cheating on her and she found out. Fast forward to today and she left him. She feels comfortable talking to me and I love talking to her. How long should I wait to ask her out? Should I ask her out? I'd hate to have her see me no more than a friend, ask her out, and look stupid.

Ok here's one...there's a guy I know through my roommate. I've been to his house and hung out with him but I wouldn't say he's a close friend. Well I got a message on Facebook from his girlfriend telling me she needed someone to talk to. Apparently he's been cheating on her and she found out. Fast forward to today and she left him. She feels comfortable talking to me and I love talking to her. How long should I wait to ask her out? Should I ask her out? I'd hate to have her see me no more than a friend, ask her out, and look stupid.

But in all seriousness, if his friendship doesn't matter much to you than go for it. I usually bring up bro code here but he deserved to lose her if he was cheating on her. Be careful though. She could be using you as a rebound and that **** sucks.

Sounds like you are already hanging out with the girl and moving forward, but you wanted an unbiased justification. I'm not necessarily worried about the dude in this case. I'm worried about the chick. Getting cheated on is a huge violation of trust. Don't go into this thinking all will be sunshine and rainbows. The crazy will eventually come out. Be prepared to exit when the ***** hits the fan...

Sounds like you are already hanging out with the girl and moving forward, but you wanted an unbiased justification. I'm not necessarily worried about the dude in this case. I'm worried about the chick. Getting cheated on is a huge violation of trust. Don't go into this thinking all will be sunshine and rainbows. The crazy will eventually come out. Be prepared to exit when the ***** hits the fan...

I just exited something after it got crazy. I have no problems there. We aren't actually hanging out yet. Just talking. She clearly needs her space and I respect that. I'm not pushing anything until she's ready.

I just exited something after it got crazy. I have no problems there. We aren't actually hanging out yet. Just talking. She clearly needs her space and I respect that. I'm not pushing anything until she's ready.

Technically won't go through until March. She won't seek anything from me if I sign over my half of the house (which her parents bought us anyway) so once I do that it's final. About the most civil split I could have hoped for.

Sounds good, man. Just don't want you to be caught in a situation before you are ready, as well.

Before this I was talking to a girl. For about a month. Things were ok. She kept asking me "what are we?" I told her "we're having a good time". Then she went all crazy on me saying I lied about my intentions and **** and she wanted me to meet her parents and crap. Stuff I'm clearly not ready for (she knew I was coming out of a marriage) so I cut her off. She wanted to get serious and I didn't. So now she's dating my roommate :/

Girls are full of drama, especially those that are insecure and have been damaged. These drama queens are emotional thinkers and create an alternative reality where whatever man fits a certain mold of what they think they need. No matter what you say or do, these girls will convince themselves that you will change or they can change you.

Eventually, they will get frustrated that things are not moving where they want it to go and will create drama over little things instead of communicating what they are looking for. You see this a lot with women who are under the age of 25-26. They are either chronically single or with scumbags/looking for the next scumbag.

Too much nonsense and not enough sex for me to ever recommend going for them. However, if you are a scumbag, you can effectively use these girls for a long time with no repurcussions.

So I'e been talking to this girl for about a month. We have a weird history that I'm not going to get into right now.

But anyway, yesterday she came over and we had dinner and watched a movie. Then today we were talking about going to study at the library together tonight. She had to work so the plan was to go at like 9 or 10. She just texted me:

-Except the library requires pants
me: Haha, what?
-I get more done at the library but I'm also sick of wearing pants for the day