Irrelevant Information

Dec 7, 2010

No sequin too sparkly, no color too bright

You think the sartorial choices of a typical Morozombie are dubious?

Think again!

Jana Khoklova and Sergei Novitski, everyone's favourite fashion plates, unfortunately ended their illustrious partnership at the end of last season. Fortunately, their greatest legacy has been preserved online in both image and video form for posterity. Thank Kwan for the Internet!

Typically, unfortunate sartorial choices on the part of skaters elicit a certain type of response. These usually include:

pity at the poor soul whose ridiculous costume choices were foisted upon him by some higher being (e.g. the sparkly penguin-waiter get-up Evan Lysacek wore at the behest of Tatiana Tarasova)

visceral pain at such an assault on one's eyeballs and aesthetic sensibilities

scorn and derision

Yet when gazing upon Khoklova/Novitski's various costumes over the years, I feel nothing but a surge of affection and joy. Forget about those bores in Michigan and take a well-deserved vacation from good taste. This is what ice dance ultimately should be: skating's crazier, trashier, drama queen of an older sister. It's innovators like Khoklova/Novitski who push the sport to a whole new level.

Truly, I am speechless in awe. Only pictures can do justice to how batshit crazy Khoklova/Novitski's costumes are. May Khoklova/Andreev follow in their stead!