Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

"On average, a poet had a life-expectancy of only 62, he said. It compared to playwrights' average age 63 years, novelists' 66 years and non-fiction writers' 68 years."

Where does a humor columnist fit in the spectrum? Or a one-person-research-department-for-a-humor-columnist? Or someone who's major contribution to world literature is commeting on someone else's blog? When will the government fund research on the issues that people REALLY care about?

"Dr Kaufman said there may also have been another explanation for poets' early deaths - their prodigious output usually made them more noticeable. Poets produce twice as much of their lifetime output in their twenties as novelists do," he said. "If an unpublished novelist was to die, fewer people would notice.

. . . so notoriety causes death? Or do writers only have so much output in them and, when it's used up, they die?

The Lundberg Survey reported Tuesday that gasoline prices at the pump just hit an all-time high. Oil is forty dollars a barrel. This summer if you want to take a trip without the kids, the Automobile Club recommends LSD and birth control pills.

the relationship is tricky but not harder to understand than the fact that your life expectancy goes up as you age (if you were 30 and you reach 31, you have escaped all your chances of dying at 30 so your expectancy goes up just a little bit).

Then (you are a famous novelist) => (you are probably old, because novelist become famous later in life) => your life expectancy is higher.

I Am Part Of You
My body is new, I am newborn son
But look at me for who I am:
A soul that's old, yet just begun
To live again in flesh, awaiting your intention
Wanting only love for you, believing your dimension.

Recognize my faith in you and show your faith in me...
Watch me now extend your trust to everyone I see.
Always let me choose my life, remember why we met...
Support the way I teach myself to never be a pet.

I hope I give you all I ask and hope I don't ignore
The beauty that we share inside
Created so we'd never hide
We'd never lack reality and never try for more
Than who we were before.

Reluctant to let go of how we dance to hide our souls,
We'll never loose that part of us that we met when I was born!

That's Enough
I woke this morn to find my name
Had been illegally appropriated
By a copyright pirate
Named Freemont Lamont Tremont.
I don't appreciate that.
My attornies AND the attornies
Of the Miami Herald
Will be in touch.
Do not, I repeat DO NOT
everevereverever
visit rebelholler.com.
Dog mother toes.

Of course no thread about poetry would be complete without the ever deadly Vogon poetry. It is similar in form, content and theme to much of the HS senior poetry that I am force to peruse. Vogons do have better spelling, however, as I am sure you will appreciate.

Goop I implore thee, my Joonting turlingdromes.

And beebtiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles.

Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my burglecruncheon. See if I don't.

Your personal Death Clocks have now been reset minus several thousand seconds. HeHeHe

*elf, we already KNOW that Punky is plotting to take over the world. At least now she's being somewhat out in the open about it, and we can keep an eye on her.*

Maybe she is just the diversion and by keeping an eye on her you are leaving the others to carry out her nefarious scheme? Or maybe the others are the diversion and she is the one carrying out the scheme. Or maybe there is no scheme at all and she is just messing with your minds.
Try not to worry about, I'm sure everything will be just fine in the end and you will not feel a thing.

Anyway, across the hall are a bunch of examples of students' poetry about love. I can see that most of them deserve an early death - or maybe to get married (there are, of course, things worse than death).

Well, I was going to post something, but after reading about dead poets, and topical haiku and bad Dave(?) poetry and conspiracies to pit blogmen against blogwoman in an apocalyptic war of words that maybe will cause this board to implode, I forgot what I was gonna say.

mike, Thanks for that link! And,now that I've gotten past that bad patch in the acid pool, (LTTG as always ;-) I just gotta say

Bangi_Gurl, if you read this, couldja re-consider that black-hooded robe?! Kinda...well...ya'd sure make a splash in my new alt-Hel ice castle comin' in wearin' it and just yer feathered boa beneath! :-)

Always envisioned that boa as black too, but any color that sets You off so flamingly!!!!

P.S.sst alex?! A little advice: Do like I do and wait watching and poised. When Punky and the Lasses proceed with their plans, we'll be ready for the show, or to run for the hills, or to dive right in! :-)

I built a machine and took over the world.
I did it because I was looking for a project.
And it was either learn French or take over the world.
So I took over the world. But nothing changed, because that would not be fair.
And next weekend I can learn French.