Apple’s iPhone 4 hasn’t even hit its one-month anniversary yet, but the company has already issued a software update that might fix the death grip problem affecting the device’s antenna.
However, despite the fact that iOS 4.1 was made available to developers late yesterday, the Cupertino outfit is keeping quiet until Friday, …

Bullshit.

Other phones have their antennas insulated, normally in plastic. The N900 antenna assembly is actually quite similar to the iPhone 4, but - yes - *inside* the case. No signal drop. No magic, just a "why the heck didn't they put insulation on there?"

My Nokia 2630 has EXACTLY THE SAME FUCKING PROBLEM. And no, it doesn't have any exposed antennae. So clearly that makes no effing difference, Professor Science.

Oddly enough, so do my family's other phones. (No, none of them have an Apple logo. We're talking two LGs, an ancient Samsung, a Sony-Ericsson and an Alcatel. No, I can't be arsed to find out the model numbers.)

This is in the backwoods of the Lazio hills, where coverage is considered "awesome" if you can actually get a single bar and vaguely understand what the person on the other end of the call is saying.

Why the fuck aren't people wanking on about these companies obviously "faulty" antennas too?

Bullshit Redux

Let me see if I get this right: you are making the claim that the Nokia 2630 has the antenna on the OUTSIDE? That, in fact, the silver-coloured area around the device is, in fact, a metal antenna? No, I see you don't. You claim that you can bridge two internal antennas!

The Nokia user guide for the 2630 confirm that (a) the antenna is INTERNAL, not EXTERNAL, and (b) you should avoid touching it unnecessarily. Specifically, you should avoid holding two fingers up to the top of the backside of the device. This will reduce the signal strength ... as expected.

And that, again, is NOT the problem with the iPhone 4. The PROBLEM is that two different antennas are EXTERNAL, and you can BRIDGE them by holding the phone in what is for many people a normal position.

If you look at the N900 schematics, you'll notice that it has its two antennas in a similar position to the iPhone 4, but *inside*. That, AGAIN, means that if you place a 75kg bag of water between the antenna and the cell tower, you WILL experience signal reduction, but you CAN'T BRIDGE THEM USING YOUR FINGER!

Of course it's expected behaviour. The more stuff - regardless of what the 'stuff' is - the signal has to punch through to reach the antenna, the less signal strength. Why we're not ranting about it? Because it is EXPECTED BEHAVIOUR.

You're not alone in being in the backwoods of Whatever Country. All mobile phones lose signal strength, but only ONE, at the moment, can have the two antennas bloody well short-circuited by holding it. (Short-circuit used imprecisely).

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Everyone just needs to chill

We are long past the point of discussing whether this is an engineering design flaw or not. It really doesn't matter at this point. This is how it plays out at most corporates when this sort of stuff hits:

Lackey: Uh, sir, we have a problem with X

CEO: You have a problem with eggs? Change your diet. I like salmon. Do you like salmon? And caviar. Do you like caviar?-

Lackey: 3 million people. And the lady from the New York Times that you made a pass at last Christmas

CEO: <closes door>. Sit down, Smithers.

and then, one of

CEO: Deny everything. Tell them they're doing it wrong.

CEO: This is terrible. We need to do a recall. Oh, and is there a children's hospital we can sponsor after this blows over? Or maybe some puppies?

CEO: Deny everything. Tell them they're doing it wrong. <Then issue a patch|pump the hole full of golf balls|tell them blue is the new black>

I think it pretty clear that Apple chose #3 and as a result are going to be the poster-child example of how not to handle a product flaw. Your best best is to over-communicate ("we've heard reports of a problem, we're not sure how widespread it is, we're working with our partners to find out, whatever it is, we'll solve it for our customers") Then you go and lean on your customer facing folks to supply a workaround ("pick up your free bumpers at any Apple store") whilst you lean on your engineers to fix it (move the gap to the top of the phone, encase it in plastic, whatever). Then you start advertising again, heavily.

*Grits teeth*

No change here

Well, I applied the software patch for a hardware problem and, surprise surprise, my phone still loses signal when held the 'incorrect way'. It's also worse than my 3Gs ever was, In my living room I can actively watch the signal drop to nothing which will cause calls to drop.