Monday, 4 August 2014

Diary of an Honest Naturalista: Week 61

I got a wake-up call very recently. There is a lady in my church who actually went natural because of me. I had given her some advice about how to deal with her daughter’s hair issues, from the information I gathered from some natural hair blogs. After she saw progress with her daughter, she later went natural, always quoting me as her major inspiration.

Knowing she understands the struggles associated with natural hair, I know she is not one to come and bash natural hair. So I was taken aback when she walked up to me in church, she herself wearing a shrunken fro.

“Anna, please do something else to your hair.”

After I recovered from my initial shock, I finally spoke. “I don’t understand.”

“This hair doesn’t look good or welcoming.” She said.

“Are you serious?”

“You have been looking the same for a long time now.” She continued.

I wanted to say. “Ehhm, actually, no. This my hair braided, and this is the first time I am doing this. I am always on twists, actually.” But her point was that it looked the same, which was true, so I didn’t bother defending myself.

“And your hair is not neat at all. It looks like you just left your house, without even bothering to do anything. It is so rough and untidy.”

At this point, I really felt bad. If it was coming from someone else, I would have said she was a natural hair hater, but coming from someone I could call my disciple, I was forced to swallow the bitter pill.

My HOD’s wife then walked in to the conversation, and heard what was going on. She has relaxed hair, but added her own statement.

“Anna, I think you have to understand. You inspired Titi to go natural. I remember when you hair was shorter, and you just started this natural hair thing, you used to do one or two things to your hair to spice it up.”

I was like “Me??? No, I didn’t do much to my hair.” I could see my defence mechanism was up again, but she continued.

“You used to put one accessory here, another there, design your hair one way or the other. You used to make efforts then. Titi went natural because of you, so I don’t think you should relent now. Don’t let yourself go. This doesn’t look good at all. You should continue making the effort.”

I gently nodded. The bitter pill was becoming worse than Aloe Vera, but I had to take it, and pretend it was going down well, with my face like this.

I promised them I would make more effort to look good, when it comes to my hair. If church members could be telling me this, I’m sure Dimeji must have noticed, but didn’t say anything because he did not want to seem like a natural-hair basher, or he’s now suddenly against my hair.

On my way home, I walked into the ladies, eased myself, and later faced the mirror. I looked at my hair, just sighed. Some things definitely have to change.

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Perhaps Anna's hair is that awkward stage my hair is. I enjoyed my hair better when it was a TWA. Now its in one "kain" awkward length phase that I can't do anything with it. Too full to pat down, too short to stay in a bun all day without the hairband flying off, twists get frizzy and look untidy after a day. I just keep it in braids, wigs or cornrows. Even the cornrows sef get frizzy after 2 days. Can't wait for the hair to grow longer.