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Monday, October 17, 2011

How Do You Solve A Problem Like Teresa?

Part 1 of the Real Housewives of New Jersey was insane!! I have never been so blown away by a reunion, seriously, it was brutal from the jump. Let's get into it.

First, Jacqueline was not there. Caroline said she couldn't be there because of her physical and emotional state following the now infamous Posche fashion show. Check Jacqueline's twitter account for her explanation as to why she wasn't there, and also her take on the reunion, which I thoroughly enjoyed. A lot of people are mad at her for not going and defending herself in person, but we don't know what her state of mind was that day. It could be that it was the right choice for her. I, personally, appreciate the fact that she addressed it and explained herself. This is a reality show, and we're only seeing a fraction of what really happens in these peoples' lives. Now, back to the reunion.

Teresa was especially aggressive. She's obviously defensive, since none of the ladies in attendance are friendly with her. When Andy brings up Jacqueline, she's immediately tense. She says that Jacqueline should have come to finish what she started, and also says she has to laugh about Jacqueline's accusations towards her. Teresa is almost eager to fight, telling Caroline, "Bring it on, baby!" By the time the cookbook is mentioned, Teresa is practically screaming her answers to Andy's questions. Teresa says her cookbook was all about family and fun, but won't admit that the "baby sister in law" she accused of copying her is in fact Melissa. Teresa then states that she included a "beautiful picture" of Caroline in the book, asking if she would do that if she didn't like Caroline. Caroline answers that she wishes her picture wasn't in the book because she doesn't want to be in it at all. Wow. Now, my thoughts on this are that no matter what the intention of the book was, it obviously wasn't received well. Teresa should have just apologized and said her intention was to be funny, not to be mean. Her defensive responses just comes off as passing the blame onto everyone else for not getting her "joke", instead of taking responsibility for the words she wrote (although I don't believe she wrote her book or her blogs without any help - I want to meet that ghost writer).

Teresa continues to say that Jacqueline and Caroline "jumped ship", implying that they chose Kathy and Melissa over her. Andy then brings up last season's reunion, and the fact that Danielle brought up Melissa, which led to Teresa pushing Andy into his throne. Teresa and Melissa discuss the fact that Teresa did not go to the hospital when Melissa's youngest son was born. Melissa says that Danielle contacted her about Teresa, but doesn't go into detail as to what they talked about. Then Melissa talks about how Teresa threatened her life about coming onto the show and said the audience would rip her about her huge forehead (project much, Tre?). There's so much wrong with this whole paragraph, I don't even have time to get to it all. Bottom line, Teresa seems to be painfully insecure. If what Melissa is saying is true, and I have no idea if it is, but if it is, Teresa needs help. Her anger obviously comes from some trauma or pain that she's not dealing with. We all know the mean things people say about Teresa's appearance. We all know the jokes about her husband. We all know how people make fun of the way she talks, dresses, etc, etc, etc. Maybe she was warning Melissa of the scrutiny she'd get if she joined the show? That's giving Tre a lot of credit. If we were talking about funny Teresa from season 1, maybe I'd believe it more. But we're talking about scary Teresa - and that makes me a lot more skeptical of everything she says.

One of the main points Teresa makes is that she's upset Kathy and Melissa went on the show without telling her. There's some discussion as to whether it was her business or not. I have a hard time believing she didn't know anything about it, but if the Bravo producers wanted to keep it from her, they certainly could have. Let's not forget, Danielle opened the door to all this drama by bringing up Melissa in the season 2 reunion. You can't blame Bravo for capitalizing on that information. The drama is what they want, and that's exactly what they got. Now, if it were me, I'd hope my family members would tell me they were coming on my reality show while we were in the middle of a huge feud. But, honestly, if you're not on speaking terms, is that really something you should expect? It's complicated.

This is when the reunion sort of goes haywire. There was so much back and forth I could hardly tweet fast enough. Teresa bashes Melissa and says if she were a "good wife" she would have made sure her husband knew about the season 2 premiere party instead of having to be invited by Teresa. Oy. Kathy calls Teresa out on the "good wife" comment, then says she's not a Gorga. Teresa corrects her and points out that Kathy's mother is a Gorga. They talk about the christening and Teresa says Gia may have watched that episode. Caroline jumps in and says she knows that Gia and Teresa saw it at the Manzo's house. Jacqueline also tweeted that Gia did see the episode twice. Caroline says Teresa told her she never wanted to make up with her brother. Teresa begins to scream at Caroline that she's a liar. This was so hard to watch for me. On the one hand, Teresa just blurts out whatever is in her head at the time. So it's possible, in a moment of anger, she may have said she didn't want to make up with her brother. On the other hand, Gia did make a comment about Melissa on the last episode, saying Melissa controls Joe Gorga - and it's highly unlikely that she came to that conclusion on her own. So maybe it's possible that Teresa let Gia see the christening episode. See? Complicated!

Andy lightens the mood - or at least tries to - by showing all the grammatical errors and mispronunciations that occurred on this season. And there were many. Then, Melissa's music career is discussed, and Teresa says her singing voice is good. She complimented the song Melissa wrote for Joe Gorga. Nice. Melissa gets emotional talking about her father and Caroline comforts her. Andy asks what Joe Gorga does for a living, and Melissa explains that he takes warehouses and converts them into condos. Teresa denies calling Melissa a gold digger, but then recounts something Melissa says that sounds a lot like a gold-digger-ish comment. It was something along the lines of not being stupid enough to let Joe Gorga get away once she saw his house. Kathy remembers the conversation differently, which prompts Teresa to say that it's 3 against 1, and adds, "Bring it on, bitches!". And now, for the moment you've been waiting for ... Melissa says that Teresa looks like the devil. Teresa says, "You're the devil. You're wearing red. It matches you. You like that, bitch? Do you like that? We're in a good place. Why are you going back there?" Ummm ... calling someone the devil and a bitch doesn't seem like something you would do while you're in a "good place". But technicalities aside, Teresa was spinning at this point. I wanted someone to come in and hand her a Xanax. Totally out of control. I can't really sympathize with her at this point because she lost it - and it made her look like everything she's says she's not - mean, bitchy, and vindictive. Maybe that's why people are calling her The New Danielle.

Andy changes the subject to Teresa's financial situation. Teresa states that she's teaching her daughters to be financially independent and she says she loves working. Andy brings up Teresa's comment regarding her Jewish friends telling her they would have left if their husband had as many financial problems as Joe Giudice. Teresa defends the comment saying it "wasn't nothing against Jewish people", then says Jewish men make the best husbands. But she never apologizes for the comment itself. Andy leaves that one alone and asks about Teresa's comment about Christmas presents for the girls - she said they'd get one or two each - but it seemed that they got a lot more. Teresa brushes it off and states that she didn't spend that much on their gifts. Teresa then says she was offended by Kathy and Melissa saying she puts on a happy face even when things are bad. Andy tries to explain it's actually a compliment, but quickly drops it. Andy asks about the bankruptcy and asks if any of their things were really auctioned off. Teresa says no, that reports saying they had Picasso paintings were false. Andy gets in a good zinger, saying they couldn't afford a Picasso. That one goes right over Teresa's head as well. Andy asks if they withdrew the bankruptcy to avoid jail time, Teresa says no. Andy looks confused and somewhat skeptical of her answer. This whole financial mess is so uncomfortable, and Teresa skirting the questions does not look good. Again, instead of owning it and saying it like it is, she makes excuses.

The conversation turns to Joe Giudice and whether or not he ever helped Joe Gorga and/or Rich Wakile flip buildings. Kathy tells Teresa not to go there, and Melissa perfectly deadpans, "So Joe Giudice is the go-to person for business advice?" That made me laugh. I really want to know what's behind this. Either Joe Giudice and Rich worked together and it didn't work out, or Rich was Joe Giudice's competition. Either way, Kathy doesn't want Teresa talking about it. Andy asks Caroline for her two cents about Joe Giudice's legal troubles, and Teresa interrupts, saying she doesn't want to hear it. Caroline fires back that she's not talking to Teresa, she's talking to Andy. She tells Teresa to relax, Teresa tells her to shut up, Caroline tells her to shut up. It's getting uglier by the minute. I have never seen Caroline so disgusted with someone before. She says she feels dumber just being in the room. Then she lowers the hammer, saying she should have followed her gut and gotten Teresa out of her life two years ago. Oh my God. This just got REAL. I honestly could not believe the contempt in both of their eyes ... it was scary.

Part 2 is going to be ridiculous. I really want to know what's going on with Dina and Caroline. Watch some exclusive bonus scenes and previews here.

On Watch What Happens Live, Andy discussed Part 1 with comedian and blogger Jay Mohr. I owe Jay an apology, actually. He was on Watch What Happens Live last season, and his wife, Nikki Cox made an appearance on the after show. I tweeted about her apparent plastic surgery, and if I remember correctly, I wasn't as kind as I probably could have been about it. For that, I apologize. I think Nikki was a beautiful woman and really didn't need any plastic surgery at all. Long story short, I realized Jay blocked me on twitter and it wasn't until he mentioned his wife that it dawned on me. So, I'm sorry Jay. I hope you can read my blogs and tweets and know that I'm a sincere person who just happens to be opinionated.

Back to Watch What Happens Live. Andy says some are saying he was too hard on Tre. Unfortunately, she is the center of a lot of the drama. So, he had to address the issues she is a part of, which is pretty much all of them. I think Andy was fair - but I know some will beg to differ. I think he tries to ask the questions the viewers want the answers to. And a big part of the audience doesn't like Teresa.

Jay Mohr was hilarious, just like his blogs. If you haven't read them, do yourself a favor and read them now. I think Jay is funny, and he gives everyone a hard time in his blogs. He's an equal opportunity ball buster, if you will. But he calls it like he sees it, and gives people credit when they deserve it. Teresa responds to one of Jay's jokes in her blog, saying she'll let him motorboat her. Gross. And not funny. And I refuse to believe Teresa writes her own blogs. They're not in her voice at all. Someone better be making good money writing that trash. I'm very offended by her ghost-written blogs.

Kelly Bensimon tweeted that Teresa is having a Kelly moment. And that's the one and only time I'll agree with Kelly ever.

Dina Manzo tweeted that it's more important to be kind than right. So, is she saying Teresa is wrong, but Caroline should be kind to her anyway? Hmmm ...

Jay closed the show with a decent rendition of "On Display", watch it here.

On the After Show, Jay made some great points about Ashley, and there was some awesome callers. I didn't get through the phone lines as they were all busy. Watch Part 1 and Part 2 for some fun stuff.