Hi, I’m trans.

I’ve known for a long time that given the choice, I’d want to be a woman. If I had a magic button that would “make me a woman”, I’d press it without hesitating.

“Don’t lots of people wish they were another gender?” I thought. (Apparently they don’t.) Turns out if you wish you were another gender, you probably are. I wish someone had told me earlier.

Like most trans people, I mostly just want to live my life. Many people don’t get to. Society is shitty to trans people. Surveys say about 50% of trans people have attempted suicide.

Fifty.

Compare that to 5% of the overall population. So I can’t imagine most people would decide to be trans given the choice. But it’s who I am and I like that.

I don’t know how to explain gender dysphoria to you. I don’t think I could write an analogy that would properly capture it. All I know is that my life of pretending to be a guy every day doesn’t feel right. And that getting to actually live as a woman sounds like a big improvement for me – even despite our society’s misogyny.

Watching other people’s transitions – something I wish I saw when I was young – made me confident that this is the right path for being a more authentic version of me. That’s why trans visibility is important.

When I looked in the mirror at the right angle and glimpsed a woman’s face in the reflection, I ran to tell my best friends. When I put on my best attempt at a nice outfit and a waiter at an Indian restaurant in London said “ma’am” to the woman they saw, I almost jumped for joy. (I settled for taking a few selfies in celebration.)

I’ll get to be my real self every day now! This is special and wonderful and joyous. So I’m very excited to re-introduce myself: Hi, I’m Sophie, a woman with she/her pronouns.

Here’s a few things you can do to help me.

Use my right name and pronouns, whether you’re talking to me, talking to someone else, or thinking to yourself. If you mess it up a couple times, it’s OK if you just correct yourself and move on.

Even if it doesn’t make sense to you yet, try to believe my story; believe me when I say that I’m a woman. You might not see a woman yet when you look at me – sometimes I don’t. But this really is me. I’m not trying to trick you.

If you have questions and want to understand better, please ask. All I need is for you to come with empathy and an open mind.