Resources - Communication and Negotiation

Speaking and Listening Skills Can Improve Your Relationship

Melissa writes about a new form of therapy that emphasizes couples' speaking and listening skills as they talk about their challenges. Read her article in ADDitude Magazine.

Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate by Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro

Although this book was written with a business audience in mind, it provides an excellent simplification of some of the basics for understanding and creating better ways to communicate. It's highly relevant for couples struggling to communicate through the often-difficult emotions stimulated by dealing with ADHD. I highly recommend it.

How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It by Patricia Love, Ed.D., Steven Stosny, Ph.D., 2007

One of the challenges of relationships isn't just ADHD, but also gender differences. This book explores two huge communication issues that all couples experience - men's shame, and women's fears of loss and abandonment. These fears are heightened in ADHD relationships, as excessive shame is a common side effect of ADHD, and distraction on the part of a male partner with ADHD can lead his wife to feel abandoned. You may not agree with, or be able to, "not talk about it" but you will come away from reading this book with a far greater understanding of some of the hidden undercurrents of your relationship.