Author
Note: I normally don't like to point out the pairing before a story
begins, but given this fandom, I've decided its only prudent. This
story is the beginning of a relationship profile for Nao and Natsuki.
So if you refuse to read stories that pair Natsuki up with anyone but
Shizuru, you have been warned.

Those
few of you I haven't lost... onward!

Edit:
A revised copy, thanks to my betas KiraDouji and Kieli.

-----

Gray
tendrils of cigarette smoke wafted slowly through the air, their
noxious odor mixing with the scents of hard liquor and inner city
life. Kuga Natsuki waved at the unpleasant cloud absently, carefully
nursing her drink. More than anywhere else, this place felt like
home. It had been when she was sitting at this very bar that she had
listened to choice bits of information from Yamada, and plotted her
revenge. It was in this bar that she had truly felt alive.

Now,
all that was left were hollowed out shells and long tracts of debris
where Shizuru and Kiyohime had obliterated the First District and all
of their scheming. What minions of the First District survived had
scattered and returned to their normal lives: police officers,
business men, researchers and teachers. She could bear them no more
malice.

In
the end, all that was left of herself was a hollow shell. Shizuru had
left for college, though she had promised weekly letters. Mai, Tate
and the rest of the friends she had made during dark times were now
consumed with school, relationships, and their own lives. As quickly
as it had begun, she found herself isolated and alone once again.

Of
course, school had started for herself as well. The third and final
year of high school was the hardest and most important; the year that
would determine what colleges she had a shot at getting accepted to,
and potentially the course of her entire life. It was extra difficult
for her, going into her third year with miserable grades and previous
poor attendance. Now, with the new semester of school in session for
just over a week, she vividly recalled why she had rarely showed up
for class. Natsuki sure as hell didn't know what she wanted to do
with her life; she wasn't even sure she wanted to go to college.
Slaving away, studying higher math concepts and English vocabulary
lists was fairly anti-climactic after battling for your life and the
lives of all your friends and loved ones against an ancient,
unknowable power.

All
of which left her here, in the Rorschach bar on a Sunday night,
taking a slow sip of her fifth glass of alcohol. There was a faint
tingling in her extremities: a sign that even with her fairly high
tolerance, the liquid was starting to have an undue effect on her.
She sighed in discontent; not even the burn of the liquor, nor the
soothingly vengeful memories this dingy establishment contained could
help her sour mood. She tossed payment and a generous tip onto the
counter, staggering to her feet. The room swayed slightly, and she
righted herself with only some effort. Her drinks had been headier
than expected, and she silently berated herself for getting this
intoxicated.

She
had wisely left her motorcycle back at her apartment, choosing
instead to walk the short distance between her apartment and the bar.
The return trip was more difficult; the lights in the narrow street
flickered irritatingly, threatening to give her a headache. As she
neared her residence, she heard a muted, angry shouting over the
mechanical hum of the florescent bulbs: male and female voices that
sounded on the cusp of violence. A foreboding
feeling set her on edge, and the sound of a shattering bottle acted
like a shot of adrenaline through her inebriated body, forcing her
into motion. She sprinted forward, turning down the alleyway, hands
instinctively rising to form a tight guard as she turned down the
alleyway.

The
sight that greeted her was terrifying: a familiar red headed girl two
years her junior, Yuuki Nao, with one hand over an eye. Her face was
set into a grimace, arrayed against three men in their late twenties,
one of whom was menacing her with a jagged, broken bottle. Without
letting herself think, Natsuki launched into action. Old habits die
hard.

-----

Nao
tried to open her eyes, but even the smallest part of her body
refused to obey. The world was a mottled haze behind her concealing
eyelids. Memories of recent events skirted her consciousness, evading
her feeble attempts at pulling herself together. There had been
bloodshed, and she was vulnerable. As these faintest recollections
began to trickle in, she felt a burst of panic and bolted straight up
into a sitting position, her hands set to ward off incoming blows.
When none of the anticipated blows came, one eye creaked painfully
open, turning upwards into the harsh light. She was greeted by a
blurry face, framed by dark blue locks, watching over her. Kuga
Natsuki? The older girl was standing a few feet away, her arms
folded over her chest, sporting a mildly concerned expression. When
Nao's mind processed the fact that the danger wasn't immediate, the
full weight of her injuries struck her like a wall. She sunk back
down onto the couch, clutching a hand to her head. Through a pounding
headache, memories sorted themselves out: a jagged bottle, the
violent clashing of limbs, her head being dashed against the bricks,
and disjointed recollections of being carried in an undignified heap
back to Natsuki's apartment.

"Those
guys really did a number on you, didn't they?"

Cutting
off her train of thought, a crimson film of anger washed over her
vision; her despicable helplessness being thrown in her face
overwhelmed any other emotions and voided her of reason. Both eyes
flew open, heedless of the pain. "Screw you." she spat,
affixing Natsuki with a gaze of pure venom. "What do you want,
my appreciation?"

"Appreciation?"
Natsuki echoed in mild surprise. "Not particularly." The
flat, emotionless response sucked the heated anger out of Nao.
Silence reigned. A quick flush of guilt passed over the redhead,
though she concealed it well. No matter how frustrated she might be,
it didn't feel quite right to lash out at her rescuer. Nao glowered
up at Natsuki, who gazed back evenly. The older girl didn't seem
perturbed by the unwarranted outburst, as much as she had the right
to be. I suppose she understands. Nao thought glumly. In
many ways, she is just as proud... and she has been brought just as
low. Nao scowled but looked away as her host finally turned and
walked into the small kitchenette in the back of her apartment.

"How
do you take your coffee?" Natsuki's voice rang off the walls.

"Black."
The word was loud enough to be heard, but a shade nicer than Nao's
usual acidic tones, offered as if it were a peace treaty.

"Just
like me then." Natsuki returned with a hint of amusement. She
walked back into the room bearing a plain black mug, steam wafting in
a small cloud. She offered the mug, which Nao accepted sullenly.
Pulling a chair over from the kitchenette, the blue haired girl spun
it so the back faced Nao and sat in it reversed. She folded her arms
over the back of the chair, nestled her head on them, and watched Nao
take a tentative sip. "Nice outfit. Isn't it a little outdated?"

Nao
swallowed the burning hot coffee and sighed with relief as the
caffeine worked its way into her system. Processing the other girl's
comment, she looked down her own body, looking at the old middle
school uniform, torn and muddy. The previous year, she had graduated
and moved on to high school, and Natsuki knew that. She pondered over
her response, finally settling on the truth. "The high school
uniform doesn't bring in the pedophiles quite as well."

"I'd
imagine not." Natsuki replied with a wry smile.

Nao
lay on the couch for a time as her headache eventually subsided into
a mild throbbing pain. Natsuki had taken off the bodysuit while she
was unconscious, and now she was wearing a deep blue long sleeved
shirt with yellow English letters, plus a pair of faded jeans. How
the hell did that girl manage to make such simple, boyish clothes
look so good? Nao averted her eyesto keep her stares from being
obvious. Looking at Natsuki's body brought up too many unpleasant
memories from the nightmarish times of the Festival.

Nao
reached to tentatively touch the swollen skin around her eye. It was
bruised and puffy around the entire socket, and extremely tender to
the touch. By the morning, it would be shaded purple, testament to
her combat. "I've had worse." she replied with a shrug.

"That
eye isn't very lucky." Natsuki remarked wryly.

Nao
couldn't help but crack a small smile in return, even if it was
sardonic. The injured eye was her left, the same eye that had been
punctured and destroyed by errant debris from their battle against
one another; the same eye that had been given back to her by the
Crystal Princess, after the defeat of the Obsidian Lord. "I
guess I should take better care of it."

"That
would be my advice. Your type of sport is a bit more dangerous now
that our Elements are gone." The older girl advised with
uncharacteristic tact. .

The
redhead snorted. "You expect me to stop with my revenge just
because it has become more challenging?"

Natsuki
eyed her. She didn't respect what Nao did, but listening to the girl
speak of revenge reminded the erstwhile HiME of herself. Given a
different time and context, she could even see herself saying those
words. "I suppose that's true."

Nao
yawned widely. "What time is it? I should give Mama a call."

Natsuki
stood and retrieved the mobile phone on the wall, handing it over
before going back to the kitchenette to pour herself a mug of coffee.
Though she didn't try and eavesdrop, she couldn't help but notice a
different quality in Nao's voice as she talked with her mother. It
was softer, and almost kind. It lacked the affronted tone Nao managed
to inject into even the simplest sentences. She rounded the corner
holding her mug, glancing over to see Nao with closed eyes and a
gentle smile on her face. So she's capable of those expressions
too. Who would have thought? Nao mumbled a goodbye into the
phone, then ended the call and tossed the handheld unit to Natsuki.
"So…" she drawled.. "What do you have to do in this
place?"

Natsuki
hung the phone back in its cradle and pondered Nao's request. She
had never entertained guests before. Her mind raced. What would
Shizuru do? Probably some sort of tea ceremony, which wasn't really
an option. She bit her lip nervously as Nao watched her contemplate.
All she really had in the apartment were her various collections, and
Nao probably wasn't into lingerie. "Well… do you like horror
movies?"

"I
like anything that makes me squirm." Nao intoned without a trace
of humor.

Natsuki's
face froze in confusion. What the hell does that mean? Nao
snickered as she watched her reaction. Natsuki got the distinct
impression that Nao was teasing her. "You would." she shot
back. "Anyway, I've always been a fan of the early Hollywood black
and white horror movies. They aren't the greatest production quality,
but given their time period, they're actually really amazing. You
have to forgive a few things…" she shrugged.

"Sounds
sort of interesting." Nao said cautiously.

Natsuki
went over to her movie cabinet, scanning down the shelves of ancient
VHS tapes, settling on one and put it into the player. She walked
back towards her chair, but Nao had drawn herself up into a sitting
position and was patting the recently vacated half of the couch. The
couch was big enough to fit both of them with a decent gap, Natsuki
reasoned, so she sat down in the softer seat.

"Sorry
about the lack of subtitles." Natsuki warned as the movie began.
Neither of them paid enough attention in English class to have any
hope of understanding what the characters were saying.

Nao
chuckled during the opening scene, as a woman screamed in horror,
standing petrified in the path of a slowly oncoming mummy she could
have easily fled. "If the dialog is half as bad as the special
effects or the acting, I don't think we're missing much."

Natsuki
narrowed her eyes, protective like a mother bear of the cheesy
classics. "Hey now, these movies spawned a generation of…"

Nao
had tried valiantly to stay awake, but even strong willpower and
caffeine combined couldn't override her battered body's need for
rest. Down and down her mind spiraled, into a consuming, murky abyss.
What small part of it that was still conscious felt a familiar rush
of mixed dread and longing as the red haze of memories' timelessness
came over her mind's eye; the haze that always accompanied clouded
dreams of when she was bound to Julia. The times were jumbled in her
head, confused by the boundless pain. She could feel the cold metal
against the gaping pit in her head where an eye had once been, a
searing ache that pierced her to the soul. Hate, desire, pain,
loathing, passion, betrayal, love; emotions bombarded her without
anything coherent attached to them, but ultimately, all of the dreams
always returned to a single point: pressing against helpless Natsuki,
metal claws parting the thin material of the black bodysuit, leaving
small red trails down pale exposed skin. Haunting eyes stared back at
her unseeingly as she leaned in, drawing in to steal a kiss, wanting
so badly that her entire being ached.

-----

She
gasped awake, sweating profusely, with the slow realization her head
was nestled in Natsuki's lap. She half rose, but her vision swam and
she collapsed back into her previous position, wincing in pain.

Nao
looked up, finding the lifeless eyes from her dream replaced by
lively emerald orbs looking down at her with concern. "Of a sort."
she replied evasively. "Are you comfortable like this?"

"I
wasn't about to toss you, head wound and all, off my lap."
Natsuki shrugged noncommittally. "I've been in worse positions. You
sort of collapsed on me right around the good part of the movie."

She
looked over to the screen; the movie was entering its final credits.
Faint tickles of the dream not moments ago were becoming more
difficult to brush it away. All the composure and mental control she
had managed to regain after her initial angry outburst at Natsuki was
slipping away. "Sorry."

Natsuki
cocked her head to the side with a curious expression. "It's not
like you to apologize for something silly like that."

Nao
tried to match the other girl's curious gaze, to act like nothing was
wrong, but she ended up swallowing guiltily. The imagery from the
dreams assaulted her, and her cheeks felt as though they were aflame.
She wanted to scream, cry, even choke the life out of the woman who
destroyed her sanity without even realizing it. Most of all, she just
wanted to steal that kiss she never had the courage to take. Instead
she lay there and blushed. "I hate you."

Natsuki's
smile vanished. "For what?"

"For
what happened during the Festival. For... everything." She had to
stop talking there, before she went into any more details. She tried
to breathe deeply and calm herself, but her breath kept catching in
her throat, silently choking her. Her voice sounded hoarse to her
ears. "For making me feel like I need to apologize."

The
dark haired girl above her was silent for a time, and every second
was an agony. "Nao... look. You don't need to apologize. I
forgave Shizuru, I forgave Yukariko and I forgave you. I don't know
exactly what happened; I don't remember and I don't want to remember.
So... just don't think about it, okay?"

Don't
think about it, she says. The words cut through her like a knife.
And what if those times, as horrible as they were, were the
only times in my life worth living? She coughed, taking a deep
breath. She could feel moisture at the corner of her eyes, and she
tried to tell herself it was from the breathing difficulties. "It's
hard not to." She swallowed hard, managing a bitter smile. "You
taught me a lot about myself."

"Then
remember the lessons, but don't think about what happened." Natsuki
gently extracted herself from under Nao and stood, laying a blanket
over the younger girl's body and smiling. "Simple, right?"

Nao
watched the movie's final credit scroll by, the logo of the studio.
They called the movie black and white, but it wasn't. Like everything
in life, it was shades of gray. "Simple? I wish." Before sleep
came to claim to redhead, she heard Natsuki intone a single word in
response. It was Nao's favorite word, but from Natsuki, it sounded
almost soothing.

"Baka."

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