Charging into battle astride a fat, stubborn elephant had never been high on General Coriando’s list of Things To Accomplish In Life. As arrows whizzed past his ears, he lamented, “I could’ve been a baker, or a tailor! I could’ve joined the circus!”

Their sheds and bunkers were overloaded with guns, ammo, rations, reactors, and even entertainment, everything they thought they needed. For five years they had readied themselves for the invaders’ arrival.

The one thing they hadn’t counted on was the aliens’ overwhelming cuteness.