Day One

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Good Morning everyone!
So, DB left this morning to start his 4 day long trek from NY back to San Diego. I feel oddly calm about the entire thing. Obviously I'm very sad but I'm really hopeful. I know it's normal to feel sad and I bet it'll get a little less sad day by day (or so I hear), but does anyone have any tips for how to get through the first day? What did you do on day one? Deployment, PCS or otherwise. I'm at work and can't focus on a damn thing. Usually work is a wonderful distraction but today is a little different.

Hey Christine, day one isn't easy, but its a good thing you're at work! even if you cant focus. Do you have any coworkers you're friendly with? (I'm not sure what you do or what setting you are in) But, I like to distract myself by distracting others LOL.

The day husband left for deployment I had class, homework, and practice. A lot of the girls from practice took me out to dinner afterwards. It didn't hit me that he was gone until I went home to an empty bed. So I took a minute to feel sorry for myself, and then I read a book until I fell asleep.

Call up a friend and see if y'all can hang out for the day to get your mind off of things.

I feel you. I'm in a non-military LDL and some days, I get really frustrated or become unproductive missing my SO. But I think everyone has those moments (especially in the beginning), and the key is to not let it linger for too long! Some days may feel more difficult and that's okay, if you cope by watching Netflix and eating ice cream for a night everyone once in a while, then go for it. Or call up your friends and have a girls night. They will be great support for you, even if they've never dated someone in the military they probably understand how it feels to be separated from a loved one!

You'll probably hear it a lot but it really does get easier. You'll fall into a new routine of work/class/hobbies/whatever you have going on in your life. The days will pass but it's up to you how you fill them. You can wallow missing him every day or you can take this time to really bond with friends, explore new hobbies, try new things, etc.

Thank you all. This is really helpful. I have never been one to let long distance become a problem, if I'm confident the relationship is right. I guess I am really nervous BECAUSE this is so new. We talked about setting smaller more obtainable goals instead of jumping right into the "long distance can't last forever so we have to talk about moving and engagement now".
I've done the wallowing thing before and I really don't want to end up there again. Thank you all for your advice, this is really comforting.

My husband just left yesterday for 5 weeks in the field, so while not long by military standards, it's still no fun. I'm a big fan of taking an hour of dedicated wallowing time, then chin up. I cried and whined yesterday morning, and now it's back to business as usual. Just try to keep busy, spend a lot of time with friends, and talk to him when you can. I've always noticed that if I'm bored/alone a lot, I miss my husband way more, whereas if I'm busy with work and friends, the time goes a lot faster. Busy is the best, and keep your focus on the next time you get to see each other