February 27, 2011 - March 5, 2011 Archives

Note: Full-res version HERE in case you ubernerds want to complain about the value of the cards she cut up instead of just yelling 'I'D DO HER!' in the comments and calling it a day like a normal pervert.
This is a chick wearing a dress (and armor!) made entirely out of Pokemo... / Continue →

Seen here looking suspiciously like the lovechild of Hunter S. Thompson and Hitler, a man demonstrates his 'DoubleGlock Machine Pistol' (aka the 'Doppleglock'). Whatever you do, don't tell the gansters -- they love holding them guns sideways! And not just because it makes the... / Continue →

Flickr user Lishoffs (aka Fabian Gzlez), the same maker as the uncannily similar-looking minimalist superhero and supervillain posters (derder!) is back at it, this time with video game characters. Can you name them all? I can. I mean, if I wanted to. Which I don't so I'm n... / Continue →

Hrey whas this brutton do?
Space beer, not to be confused with beer made with ingredients grown in space, is beer designed to be consumed in space by future space-tourists. Why does space deserve it's own beer? I dunno, but I'm getting pretty jealous about it!
The reason wh... / Continue →

Remember Professor Hiroshi Ishiguro's future-vision of robotic humanoid cell phones? Well the crazy SOB has started developing prototypes, and these are them. WOULD DROP IN TOILET AND NOT FISH OUT.
The Elfoid...fits in your pocket and tickles you when you've got a call.
"T... / Continue →

So apparently there are several species of fungi from Brazilian rain forests that can take over an ant's brain, control it, and then kill it. Now I know what you're thinking, and no, you really shouldn't sell this info to a mad scientist.
Originally thought to be a single spe... / Continue →

Harvester beam still under development. Get it? Farm equipment joke! That one goes out to all you yokels in the midwest reading Geekologie on a dial-up connection and daydreaming about corn. Haha, do I know you guys or what? Anyway -- an "attractive" tractor beam. BUSTED ... / Continue →

Well folks, don't bother marking your calendars, because February 10, 2012 is the date you can go stuff another $16 in George Lucas' moneygrubbing pocket to see Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace in 3-D. If you're lucky, maybe on the way to the local cineplex you'll have ... / Continue →

This is a Nintendo cartridge that's been stuffed with a breathalizer unit and synced to a homebrew NES game so you can blow into it and find out just how boozy you are. Fun for the whole family! (Except grandma, she's a mean drunk).
DrunkenNES is a for-real NES game loving... / Continue →

According to National Geographic, the world's most typical person is a 28-year old Han (ethnic group) Chinese man. There are more than 9-million of them, and National Geographic used over 190,000 of their photos to create this composite image. But they say that in 20 years th... / Continue →

This is a video of the gameplay footage from the upcoming Zelda release, The Legend of Zelda: The Skyward Sword. Admittedly, it looks great, but apparently they've decided to make Link (a long-time lefty) a righty for the sake of the Wii's motion controls, which is causing an ... / Continue →

Seen here refusing to pull dude's finger, this is a model of Hogwart's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry from those Harry Potter books made by Patrick Acton (who also did this matchstick Minas Tirith). "Damn GW, two Potter posts in one day? You're making my wand flutter!" I ... / Continue →

You know what the biggest problem with nightvision cameras is? They make your sex tape look like shit. If I wanted to see two green, googly-eyed aliens having sex I'd buy a telescope and point it at the moon (oh they're there). Enter the COLOR nightvision camera -- heralding... / Continue →

Seen here proving he has zero clue what the world actually looks like, artist Samuel Granados creates 3-D maps out of LEGO blocks that show migration data. Oh c'mon -- BIRDS CAN'T READ LEGO!
His project is very funny: a 3D cartogram about emigration and inmigration between ... / Continue →

This is a series of Harry Potter pickup lines told between two girlfriends on Facebook, both speaking as if they had a penis. And maybe they do. That's cool, I just don't want to see it. Not in real life anyway. If it was a Polaroid or on TV I might take a glance but then p... / Continue →

I don't actually think it's a water pipe, I'm pretty sure it's dry. Like my mouth. Hoho, tokin' on the job! Just kidding. One time I tried writing a post high and was so ashamed I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror without my face melting off. "Are you sure you wer... / Continue →

Well folks, to the surprise of not a single f***ing person, Apple announced the iPad 2 today. Are you going to get one? Kidding, I don't really care, I was just making conversation. BAD CONVERSATION. That's how little I care. The highlights, per Engadget:
"Twice as fas... / Continue →

I thought God invented bananas with peels so we wouldn't have to put them in bags. But what do I know? I'm just a guy who made a cucumber salad after his roommate used it as a buttplug. NOT COOL, DEREK. I'm afraid to even ask what he did to my string cheese.
While the trial... / Continue →

This is a Call of Duty: Modern Warfare themed movie trailer called 'Find Makarov' that proves beyond the shadow of a doubt that fans are making movies I'd be more likely to go see than the big production companies. Just watch it. Then realize if 20th Century Fox was responsib... / Continue →

Children: they like to hurt each other. I remember having rock fights when I was a kid, but that was back in the stone ages (rock joke!). Now kids have electronics, and, FINALLY, a realistic-looking and functional taser toy. That's right, it actually shocks. Some children m... / Continue →

Sarah White is a 24-year old therapist who practices 'naked therapy', or the act of getting butt-ass naked while you cry about the time your dad called you a loser. Iffy? Absolutely. Better than the guy who tries to hypnotize me and touch my privates? Maaaaaybe.
White begi... / Continue →

I don't really keep up on microscope technology because I only use mine to look at breakfast cereal and bits of weed, but apparently there's been a breakthough in optics that allows an actual glimpse of objects on the nanometer scale (versus scanning electron microscopy, etc.).... / Continue →

Seen here throwing a life-altering nuttercut, two Street Fighters take turns performing ultra combos (NOT hj's) on each other. Sadly (or fortunately depending on how much you've hated them), this is the last installment in the Ultra Combos IRL series (previous efforts HERE and... / Continue →

PUMPKIIIIIIIIINS!
I've never actually been a big fan of Penthouse because I saw one of their magazines growing up and it was waaaaaaay too raunchy for me. Personally, I think some things (read: what a vagina looks like up close) are better left to the imagination. In my mind... / Continue →

Seen here prepping for a hot date, a male capuchin monkey who washes in his own urine is more likely to drive the lady-monkeys wild and, ultimately, get to show them his banana. HAVE SEEN, GOOD ON KONG DONGS THANK YOU.
A number of New World monkey species, including mantled h... / Continue →

The Dogbrella is a $30 umbrella for dogs from Hamacher Skeletormaker. It's clear so your dog can see through it and not accidentally stab a cat in the eyes with the umbrella points (even though they want to!). I assume galoshes are sold separately. My dogs hate the rain so i... / Continue →

Aleandre Farto (whose name is even a little explosive!) creates murals through the "precision detonation of plaster and brick". This is a music video featuring some of his work in progress. If you're a fan of watching explosions in slow motion, this is for you. If you're not... / Continue →

Probably should've practiced in the mirror longer.
A 22-year old who was impersonating Professor Zoidberg from Futurama got his nose broken and teeth chipped after being punched in the face by a man who obviously hates cartoons. Whatever, I roundhoused a guy for doing a prett... / Continue →

This isn't the first time we've seen Boba Fett playing Saria's Song on the accordion, but maybe you didn't catch the first one. Me? I catched 'em all. "Caught not catched, dumbass." Yeah well your crotch is about to catch my fist if you don't stop correcting me! "MY JUNK... / Continue →

The new Mortal Kombat has been stamped "refused" by the Australian Classification Board and will not be sold in the country (legally anyways -- I'll be selling them on eBay and shipping them there like there's no tomorrow). The decision was made in part due to the realisticall... / Continue →

This is a video of last week's Discovery shuttle launch as seen from a commercial flight departing Orlando, FL. It's pretty amazing to see. Like being duct-taped to a computer chair so you can't move and then having your eyes taped open while coworkers take turns throwing thi... / Continue →

11-year-old Supatra Sasupha has a busted chromosome that's left her with Ambras Syndrome, a rarity that, in case you couldn't tell, causes a person to grow thick hair everywhere. But, despite laser hair removal being ineffective, this isn't a sad story, this is a story of the ... / Continue →

Using word blocks to press things into people's skin so they walk around as free advertising: good idea. Using red-hot metal to press things into people's skin so they walk around as free advertising: better idea.
The ad agency DDB Auckland altered benches to press an adver... / Continue →

This is a song by mixologist Pogo called 'Murmurs from Middle Earth' created entirely out of chords and vocal samples from the movies. I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty catchy in a 'damn I just wanna shake my ass!' kinda way. Which -- what do you say we all gather in one ring(!... / Continue →

Well Star Wars Jedi bathrobes already exist, so it was only a matter of time before somebody made Star Trek bathrobes. Available in doodoo-yellow 'Kirk' and baby blue 'Spock' models, each robe will set you back $50. Unless you accidentally let your morning wood hang out the f... / Continue →

Note: Slightly larger version HERE in case you want to -- you know what, I don't even wanna know.
I knew there was a reason I didn't pick up Marvel vs. Capcom 3. "Yeah, I thought it was because your mom doesn't let you play violent games." *mocking* Meh, I thought it was be... / Continue →

The Robo Vacuum has apparently been out for a while (OLD! YOU SUCK GW!) but I've never seen it before and I try to keep abreast (also: abooty) of robotic products so I can assess their danger level and assign an appropriate color-code. These $15 suck-bots are a pink with littl... / Continue →

Blik Re-Stik Asteroid Wall Decals are $45 sticker packs that turn your frown upside down wall into a giant unplayable game of Asteroids. That's a whole set pictured, so you can get an idea of what you could do with one. Which, whether you have any sense of composition or not,... / Continue →

Note: Larger version HERE but you can go to Brian's DeviantART page for a massive 7500x5000px (18MB) version.
Here's one last piece (promise) of Zelda propaganda to finish off the celebratory week. It's a chart depicting the various swords from the different Zelda games as cr... / Continue →