Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Pork, Porn and Liquor

So I’m sitting on my sofa Friday night enjoying a bottle of Oban 14 year. About ¾ of the way through it, I get this idea. This crazy and wonderful idea.

Pork, Porn and Liquor. Ohh yeah!

Yea see, there are forces at work on this planet that wanna make sure you can’t enjoy a nice ham sandwich, a Playboy or a glass of Scotch. I’m not just picking on the Muslims (well mostly I’m picking on them). There are wackos all over the place (MADD) that wanna seriously curtail your ability to live your life as you see fit. Be it sharia law or Bible belt prudes, we should stand up this tyranny, until we fall down drunk fat and aroused!

So, Starting October 5th, and for the next 30 days I say we go out and eat as much bacon as we can, watch as much porn as we can handle, and kick the living shit out of our livers until they are rock hard.

This is America god damn it! Lets celebrate our FREEDOM!

Ohh yeah, those of you near Scaggsville, look forward to a Pork, Porn, and Liquor Party coming your way!