Attraction and dating information for the post-divorce crowd

Just Who Is This Wiggler?

I got a fine, politically correct email where the sender takes some umbrage at one of my recent blog posts. I enjoy such umbrage because it gives me a nice, juicy blog post to write. I’m grateful to the politically correct shitlord for helping me wend away a fine Friday night. Tourist season has ended here so there ain’t no lady tourists to flirt with. Even my dog is bored.

The format of my fisking is thusly – the paragraphs of the original email are in italics, my responses are in bold. Naturally, I will not reveal the original email address to protect the identity of the foolish, ignorant, and naive. Should I give some sort of trigger warning for the faint of heart and slender of intellect? Nah, just keep reading.

This article is simply not ok.

Eh, bad start. In my opinion, this article is completely awesome. A big part of Red Pill wisdom is acknowledging the horrible conventional wisdom that dispenses psychologically damaging advice regarding attraction and dating. In my writing here, I do a fine job of dealing with yet another pretty lie we tell each because of social expectations and culturally cancerous political correctness. Note to readers: political ideology is ruining the quest for meeting relationship goals.

You want women to “show some damned humility” and not display the “masculine” characteristic of confidence, nitpicking even the very words you think women should be allowed to use to describe themselves so that males will be more attracted to them–because you believe women ought to be more docile and submissive, traits that you believe will fulfill a male’s “relationship goals”. Inherent here is the implication that women are designed to submit to men, and thus are not equal–textbook misogyny.

Oh… I’m a big, bad misogynist! Let me scuttle home with my wounded soul tucked between my legs! Hey Poindexter, here’s a basic biological fact that ideology will never, ever be swept away through shame or bullshit social expectations: Men and women are different. We are different physically, emotionally, intellectually, socially. These are natural behaviors based on sex and DNA. We are so different that it’s amazing how we managed to populate this planet with several billion human beings.

Here’s something else, words have connotations which also cannot be swept away. Frankly, the English language completely fails to express the proper words with the effective connotations in this context. So, here’s how I will refine your ham-fisted attempts at framing the debate. In the context of attraction and dating, the man takes the lead. If the woman has a problem with that, she can simply rebuff the fellow’s advances, no harm, no foul. But here’s a dirty little secret, women adore the masculine confidence of a man approaching, being attractive, and leading the very rewarding art of the natural courtship dance.

Let’s stop acting like human qualities such as confidence are gendered. Let’s stop pretending confidence is for men while humility is for women, let’s stop pretending that certain words should only be associated with certain sexes. Let’s wake up to the fact that humans are humans regardless of gender, and both genders are equally capable of the same emotions, the same wants, the same qualities. Both confidence and humility are good qualities that good people possess. People. Period.

English words, including adjectives and adverbs, are either directly or indirectly assigned to a person’s sex. Pronouns are clearly feminine and masculine. Adjectives and adverbs have common usage applied to a person’s particular sex. Given the vast differences between the sexes, your assertion that both are “are equally capable of the same emotions, the same wants, the same qualities” is simply wrong. Acknowledging, accepting, and embracing those differences make it far easier and far more fulfilling for the men and women seeking to meet relationship goals. The dating coach industrial complex is a profoundly important social trend and really reveals attraction truths. When it comes to attraction between the sexes, humility is on the feminine side of the spectrum, confidence is on the masculine side of the spectrum. Fight that at your peril because you will lose. But have fun while you try.

The fact that you believe a woman’s confidence works against a man’s feeling needed is…ludicrous. A woman’s confidence is her own and if a man feels threatened by it, he ought to reevaluate his own insecurity, because it’s incredibly childish to believe that another individual’s confidence with their own, personal self will emasculate him. That’s like saying because your girlfriend is eating an ice cream bar, she’s preventing you from eating one too. You’re effectively saying that as a man you need to have all the ice cream and any ice cream she gets should come from your hand because it’s your job as a chivalrous male to give it to her or withhold it as you please, right? Let’s stop being a baby and understand that both partners can have their own ice cream and enjoy it together.

Oh lordy, here comes the usual “threatened, insecure man” trope. Lay off the attempted shame, it’s beneath you and completely ineffective when arguing in this space. The readers here simply laugh that away because they are older and wiser. Readers in this space, the Manosphere, want truths. You are not dealing in truths, you are dealing in unrealistic and damaging social expectations. Oh, and just using the word “emasculate” the way you did is ludicrous and also ineffective. Really? Wow, just wow. I can’t even.

Women are just as entitled to confidence as men, in both the public and romantic spheres, and don’t exist to submit themselves to the whims of your dick. Your sense of what a relationship is and ought to be is very warped and seems to be based on some fantasy of a valiant knight protecting some helpless damsel, when in reality a relationship is two people enjoying ice cream together on equal terms.

Shit, I loathe chivalrous white knights as much as you. I deal in realistic and successful attraction and dating advice for the post-divorce crowd. A doormat dude supplicating himself to a woman’s endless needs kills a woman’s attraction and respect for that guy. Most men are ignorant of this. Just ask the fellow over at Bring Chivalry Back. He’s swimming up the cultural and biological Mississippi river with no arms, no legs, no life jacket, and a lead weight tied around his waist. Also, enough with the word “equal”. What part of “men and women are different” don’t you understand? Oh, wait, all of it. Time to move on.

Instead of demanding that women humble themselves before men, please realize that the fact that you feel women need to do this in order for men to feel good about themselves speaks of incredible insecurity. Effectively, you’re asking for a more abject woman so that you can feel in control, which is not healthy whatsoever and is actually a dangerous complex.

Let’s review some shaming code words aimed at men: Insecure, immature, intimidated, threatened, etc. These words simply don’t work on confident and charismatic men. Water, meet duck’s back. Oh, and “control” is another code word aimed at men. It can be translated as “do a woman’s bidding” so you can receive some affection. Here’s another dirty little biological secret in primates like us human. Relationships between the sexes is transactional. Don’t like it? Offended? That’s your problem and yours only.

You claim that women “humbling themselves” before men will evoke their protective instinct, but what women really need protection from is this kind of misogyny.

I’ll end with this: While you claim a confident woman is good only for a few dates and sex, if this is the kind of thing you truly believe then you aren’t even good for that. Show some damned humility, already.

In closing, and after being marginally entertained by writing this blog post, I sum up with these words: Go fuck yourself you simpering, politically correct stooge. You know nothing of the realities of honest attraction and dating. Start a dating coach business, you’ll be bankrupt in moments. Also, go be humble on your own time. The readers here have more important things to do and humility is not scheduled.

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6 thoughts on “Just Who Is This Wiggler?”

I dunno.. Is it insecure to choose someone less difficult to deal with? Someone who actually needs me instead of just wanting me? Why pick a harder and more insecure path, if the easier one is just as good in every other way? Might be worth it in some ambitious career endeavor (or climbing a tall mountain), but why turn romantic relationships into accomplishments to hang on the wall.
And wanting an easier person to be with is not misogyny (or misandry if coming from a woman). Plus vulnerability can be so cute.

So many TPM zingers, I’ve had to map my F9 key to play rimshot.wav! (Due to Man-o projects, don’t presently have space in my crib for a real drum set & cymbals.) The whiner sounds like a twenty-something feminist drone, who works either for a .gov or a non-profit.