JOHN DALY SETS THE RECORD STRAIGHT

In response to the bad press that always follows 24 hours in the drunk tank when you pass out at Hooters, John Daly has come forth to set the record straight on last week’s incident. And by “set the record straight,” I mean “confuse me with statements that don’t fit in with the police report.”

According to Winston-Salem police, Daly appeared “extremely intoxicated and uncooperative” when he was found outside a Hooters restaurant early Oct. 27. With no other means of transportation, he was taken to the Forsyth County jail for 24 hours to get sober.

Daly said it could have been avoided if his friends had realized he tends to sleep with his eyes open when he’s tired, stressed and has been drinking. He said the driver of his private bus, parked near Hooters, panicked when he saw Daly and called the paramedics. […]

So, okay. The police report says Daly passed out in the Hooters, and his friends abandoned him. Daly says he was on his bus, and his concerned friends called the paramedics. I don’t want to sound like some asshole skeptic here, but maybe — juuuuuust maybe — we should take the word of the passed-out drunk with a little salt.