Wednesday

I don’t know why I have had such a hard time trying to write
and share the following story.I think
being online we can control how we come across.One of my friends said that we only put things online that make us look
good and happy and like we’re perfect – but we’re not – I am not.

Years ago our pastor had a vision of buying the property
surrounding the church and starting a pregnancy center on one part of the land.

He presented the idea of buying the land to the church and
we voted to purchase the property.

After we purchased the property he asked different members
of the church to be on a “Steering Committee” to learn everything it would take
to build and run a pregnancy center.Chuck
and I were asked to be on the committee and were very honored to do so.All of the members, on the committee, spent months gathering the
information and putting it together to make a presentation to the church.

On the day we did the presentation the church was pretty
full - if I remember correctly.After we
shared the information people were given the opportunity to say what they
thought about it.The church seemed
pretty divided on the issue.Some people
even seemed angry about it. Instead
of voting whether we would start work on building a center our Pastor asked us
to individually pray and seek God for 40 days.He asked us not to talk about it with anyone.He asked us to pray and seek God and then
come back together and share what we learned.

During the 40 days I had jury duty.That may not seem like it had anything to do
with anything but it did.It was a
murder trial.The man on trial was at
the scene of the crime.He went to the
apartment with 3 other men.He had a gun
and tried to fire it but it misfired.He
knew what was happening, what the other men had planned, and he supplied the
guns.The girl that was killed was hit
by a stray bullet in the head and killed instantly.During the trial the judge read something
called the principal law to us before we were to deliberate.I will tell you what it says in a minute

After the 40 days were over we met back at church and our
Pastor asked what we had learned.A lot
of people got up and spoke and said what they thought. I knew I was supposed to share what I had
learned but I have this fear of public speaking.This fear is not a little fear.It is a huge fear.I freeze up, can’t speak, feel like I will
pass out and get an extremely upset stomach.If I do manage to get any words out my voice shakes uncontrollably.So I was a coward and did not share what I
had learned.

This is what I learned at the trial and should have shared:

Man has a law called the Principal Law and it states, if a
person knows a crime is going to be committed and does nothing to stop the
crime, that person is just as guilty as the person who commits the crime and can
be held accountable to the full extent of the law.

Our church was trying to start a pregnancy center that
would help women who found themselves in an unexpected pregnancy.Women who were confused and scared would be
given all the information they needed to make a truly informed choice.Hopefully they would choose life, not
death.If we, as a church, did not do
something to try to stop abortions and try to help these women– we were just as
guilty as those who do abortions and tell the lie that there is no other choice.

There’s a verse James 4:17 that shows
God’s viewpoint:

Therefore, to one who knows the right
thing to do and does not do it, to him it is sin.

Basically it’s the same as the law that man has made – the
Principal Law.

Even though I did not have the courage to speak, our church
did vote.Thankfully, they voted for the
center.I have struggled with feeling
like I could never be forgiven for not speaking that day – but that’s not
true.God has forgiven me but I have to
believe it and let it go.Maybe you can
learn from my mistake.If you know God
has shown you something and He wants you to do, speak, or share it – do it, or speak
it – do not be afraid. You
do not want to have regrets that haunt you for the rest of your life.

Saturday

Today I was talking to my sister-n-law and she brought up this story I shared with her years ago.
I thought I had put it on my blog before - and I did - but I feel like I'm supposed to share it again so here it is.

Some of you know I drove a tractor trailer with my husband for a little while. We were team drivers. When we started, I was the day driver and he had the night shift but we ended up switching. I preferred the night, how it was less crowded, cooler and quiet. But I didn’t like how you couldn’t find a parking place at night and would always have to park really far from the bathrooms. Which brings me to this story.

We were in LA. I think it was actually the first time we were there. We were at a company owned operating center which is fenced and locked and only drivers who worked for them were allowed to park and use the showers, restaurant, laundry and fueling station. It was about 2:30 in the morning and I needed to go to the bathroom. Chuck was exhausted from the drive and did not want to go with me. I was very angry about this because of the time and having to walk to the facilities by myself. In my anger I did not think about what I was doing. We were trained to never walk between trailers in the dark, or alone, and to always go the most lighted route for safety. I was muttering under my breath, walking in the dark between trailers and finally got onto the parking area that was flooded in light. Walking toward the building I could see the fuel pumps and this Asian man dressed in red and green, rather bright. He was stepping back and forth in place watching me, like he was waiting for me.

When I got close enough he said, “You know you shouldn’t be walking between the

trailers in the dark like that. I know the company’s picky about who can work for them but you just never know if someone might be a little crazy. You need to stay out of the dark and stay in the light. I care about you and I never want to see you get hurt. Remember, stay out of the dark and stay in the light.”

I was so shocked I just said ok and turned to walk up to the building. I turned back around to say, “thank you”. But, there was no one there. And there was nowhere to go that I would not have seen him. It was a large open area and in the second it took me to turn around it would have been impossible for him to have gone out of sight. On my way back to the truck I made sure to stay in the light and anytime I had to be out at night after that I always remembered him and what he said.

Friday

We celebrated Easter Sunday and Chuck's birthday together this year at our house. It was a nice day but I've gotten really bad about not
taking pictures. These are the few that were in focus. I have more with other family members but they're so blurry I won't put them on here.

Jesse

Corey and Minion who loves his Mommy so very much.

Monday after Easter - blue jays building a nest

He kept watching me getting closer and closer

My favorite

Yesterday was a good day working with two other friends one a writer the other a writer/artist. It's always good to get together and work on things like websites and editing/critiquing work. It helps to inspire, learn and improve. It counts as work too. We helped Debbie set up her new blog you can visit her here: The Poet on Blueberry Street

It looks really nice! She did a great job!

It made me wonder should I start a new blog or just update this one for now. I decided to just update this one after seeing how much work and time it took yesterday for her to get hers going. I also made goals to write more often on my blog. We shall see how it goes.

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About Me

April 1, 2016 - time for an amazing update - I am now in my 5th year of my fight with stage IV breast cancer that has spread to my bones.
This is where I share my fight, my Art and photography, my writing, and my relationships with God - family and friends. Please contact me if you would like to use anything on this site, thanks!
vlynnhud@yahoo.com