Obviously, we're strangers, in the sense that I kicked the kisa's ass, but this is a new thing.
And I want to be sure.
Before I let it out.

I'm jj, and I'm not sure I approve of the message my silly heart is sending...careful now, careful!

Posts: 7007 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas

Sad in AZ♀ 24239Member # 24239

Posted: 8:32 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Like!

May your 2015 be more FUCK YEAH! than fuck this

Posts: 21008 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY

jjct♂ 17484Member # 17484

Posted: 8:41 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Thanks friend - means a LOT to me!
I'm a bit skeered...

Posts: 7007 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas

OnceInALifetime♂ 26023Member # 26023

Posted: 8:53 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Yeah, it is scary. The few times I've felt that I've gotten my ass kicked.

But that's probably because my own confidence plummets when I feel the tingles. Which makes me wonder, is that partly what the tingles are all about? Feeling like you're in the presence of an idol?

I don't trust the tingles much myself. If you figure out how to work with them, let me know, because it would be fun as hell to be able to surf that wave.

BH, now divorced

Posts: 3012 | Registered: Oct 2009

inconnu♀ 24518Member # 24518

Posted: 9:11 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Sweetie, I'm pretty sure if you were just going to be attracted to attraction it would have happened way before now. It's been a long road, you've done a lot of hard work. Trust in that, and enjoy the rewards.

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect

Posts: 12238 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX

jjct♂ 17484Member # 17484

Posted: 9:24 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Awww! I LOVE you for that sister!
Gives my heart some peace.
Instead of juddering back and forth over the line between self-checking and outright navel-gazing!

OIAL - it feels like the same question.
The tingle is in me,
BUT
I refuse to attribute it to an idol...or let's say
*something outside of me*
Does that make sense?

It's what I learned through the healing, that is - to embrace - within - every dam shred of every dam thing.

Posts: 7007 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas

Jrazz♀ 31349Member # 31349

Posted: 9:28 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

"All the wars, all the hatred, all the ignorance in the world come out of being so invested in our opinions. And at bottom, those opinions are merely our efforts to escape the underlying uneasiness of being human. - Pema Chodron

Posts: 20914 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California

nowiknow23♀ 33226Member # 33226

Posted: 9:39 AM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

It's what I learned through the healing, that is - to embrace - within - every dam shred of every dam thing.

Damn straight. Welcome to NB, jj.

You can call me NIK

“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön

Thanks jo!
You guys are like angels on my shoulder - the right shoulder!
I'm going to go grab some grub & a cold one, listen to some John Philipso -
it's Independence Day!
Wait! Now that just figures, doesn't it?
hoo boy!

Grabbing the popcorn and a cold one, sitting back... And looking forward to the updates.

hugs,

K

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 6040 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida

persevere♀ 31468Member # 31468

Posted: 6:12 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

Great post jjct! Can't wait to hear more.

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44

DDay:2011
Status: D 2011

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4840 | Registered: Mar 2011

lieshurt♀ 14003Member # 14003

Posted: 7:54 PM, July 4th (Thursday), 2013

The dang thing is -
I'm attracted.
& I want to be sure, inside,
that I'm NOT just attracted to attraction.

I agree with Inconnu. If this were the issue it would have happened before now.

((jjct))

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere.

Posts: 14016 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston

Amazonia♀ 32810Member # 32810

Posted: 6:19 AM, July 5th (Friday), 2013

Am I the only one who'd really like to hear more about this tingle inducing non-idol?

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 14049 | Registered: Jul 2011

jjct♂ 17484Member # 17484

Posted: 7:23 AM, July 5th (Friday), 2013

She
.
.
.
.
fills my eyes.

The fact that this has even happened astonishes me.

For all its unexpectedness, the tingle's strength...I won't say overwhelming...more like captivating.
Like a new flavor.
Like holding a Popsicle at arm's length.

She's mid-40's, so it's not exactly like I'm throbbing the cradle here, and I'm not sure if it matters, or how it might matter in the future - we're different races.

I don't care, actually.
The fact that this has even happened is all my mind can encompass right now.
Another amazing thing to me is
"I don't care"

Self-protection?
Maybe, it doesn't feel bad - just "different"...
but the outcome is uncertain,
yeah, like we don't know that!
...and I'm just riding the feeling right now.
She fills my eyes.