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Friday, January 16, 2009

I Almost Died.

Here's the story.

A few weeks ago, Husby and I went to the grocery store. We bought the usual groceries and toiletries, and went on our merry way. We went home and unpacked the groceries. I put the milk, juice and eggs in the refrigerator. I placed the cereal, flour, rice-a-roni and canned goods in the pantry. I threw the cleaning supplies in their proper places, and lastly, shoved my two brand new packs of mid-morning snacks on their special shelf.

I am ravenous in the mornings. I eat breakfast on the way to work and by 9:30 I feel as if my stomach is completely empty. I eat a yogurt or an apple sauce to get me by and always...always a pack of peanut butter crackers.

Since I have been on such a peanut butter crackers kick, while at the store a few weeks ago, I bought two packs of them to keep me stocked for a while.

Yesterday morning, as I was amidst my morning routine of putting on my makeup while watching Good Morning America, something caught my attention.

Peanut Butter Crackers.

"Oh, I must not be the only one who suddenly loves these salty little jewels - they're making National news!", I thought to myself.

Until I heard the world salmonella.

I dropped my mascara while smearing my eye liner as I sat with my jaw dropped in disbelief. The anchor was holding up TWO packs of peanut crackers while warning us: "If you have either of these packs of crackers, throw them away immediately. It has been discovered that they are carrying salmonella and this has resulted in five deaths to date."

I jumped up, ran into the pantry and checked my two packs of fresh crackers.

They were the exact two packs the anchor was holding. My eyes were fixed on the open package as I realized I had eaten 4 packs so far. I threw them away immediately and started to panic.

I broke out into hives, chills ran down my spine and sweat poured off my face. I grabbed my stomach and felt as if it were being attacked by millions of little salmonella amoebas. I started to heave and contemplated the nearest route to the Emergency Room.

Then....... I snapped out of it and realized I was just fine.

The human mind. It's a tricky little thing.

I rubbed little Levi and asked him if he had salmonella and he didn't answer. He did give me a little kick a few hours later though. I think it was his way of telling me that he was fine.

So...

If you don't hear from me in the next couple of days, please call the cops. I could be dead in my house surrounded by unopened packs of peanut butter crackers from the devil. If that's the case, you are all invited to my funeral.

On one condition.

You have to say really nice things about me and weep as loud as you can while wearing dramatic black head coverings. I want some mourning that people won't soon forget, guys!

And while you're at it, feel free to throw some fun goodies into my casket like some flowers and some loose diamonds to make me look pretty and sparkly. But please, no peanut butter crackers.

You are TOO FUNNY! Seriously, I'm glad you're okay. Had you got those little "Salmanella" boogers, you would have known before now! Thanks for the chuckle. BTW: I LOVE PB Crackers!!! Guess I need to watch more news and less Noggin!!

Oh my Gosssssssssh. I just bought the toasted peanut butter crackers for Dave this week--I just called him (he has been gone since Sunday and will return today) saying "dont eat those crackers!!" He said he already finished his two boxes and asked if I was trying to kill him... haha..

But on a more serious note, I would wear a big black hat with feathers and mascara that wasn't waterproof. :0) Thanks for the laugh :0)

holy crap I have those same peanut butter crackers in my pantry right now! and in my desk at school! Ya know, this happened a couple years ago with the jar peanut butter, you'd think they could get their crap together! Whoever "they" are!

Go buy some Lance brand peanut butter crackers. that's the kind we get- very yummy and I looked them up and they are totally okay! They released a press statement to say they were in no way affected and have double checked anyways.

Your hilarious! I did have salmonella when I was a kid; it was from undercooked chicken from an airplane meal; you know back when they served you a free meal. I was out of school for 9 weeks and I had to get a home tutor...it was not a pleasant thing.

I am sure you are fine and Levi is doing fantastic. Just think the media does have a way of scaring us.

Okay, I just have to say something for the sake of my mom. She works for Kellogg's (who owns the companies who make those crackers). Apparently there has been a salmonella outbreak that is linked to peanut butter. These crackers have not gotten anyone sick yet, but have been taken off the shelves as a precaution. These crackers did not kill anyone (or make them sick), but some peanut butter did. Whew! Had to get that off my chest.

Hopefully this hasn't scarred you for life and you will begin buying those awesome crackers again once they are deemed safe and put back on the shelves.

Hi I needed to add this to your comments as I just read this in the news. Eating peanut butter while you are pregnant results in a high increase of your baby being allergic to peanut butter once he is born. Which totally made sense to me because my best friend ate peanut butter everyday while she was pregnant with her son and her son is so allergic that she can't even have peanut butter in the house, if he even touches it he will end up in the emergancy room. You might want to look it up on the web, if I find the article I will forward it to you. Maybe your husband can check into it. Just food for thought !! I know how good it tastes, I love, peanut butter too. Happy Friday !!!

you just crack me up! i can't believe that about the salmonella thing...i love peanut butter crackers too, but no more! you watching Good Morning America was not a coingkidink!!! that was for SURE a God thing, and He was protecting you and little Levi :) just be careful though, i really don't want to attend your funeral anytime soon!

lol! this is hilarious! I believe, now more than ever, that you really are my long lost sister, and that you have my mom's over reaction genes!!! ...Maybe I should state that I am so glad you are OK (mom never likes it if we disregard her near-death experiences). I would most definately make it to your funeral if those devil crackers did indeed get you. :D

Hello, Darlings!

I am a thirty-something girl who has dreamed of having babies and making a warm and enchanting home all of her life. After 12 years of school, 4 years of college and 4 years of the workforce, I finally reached my goal and am living my dream. God has blessed me with the most endearing Husby in all the land and he is a Sports Medicine Physician fulfilling his own dream. We have a bubbly little boy named Levi and an adorable baby boy named Ezra, who bring us constant joy and bundles of giggles. Join the four of us, as we walk through the journey of life one dazzling day at a time.