Last Friday, Lindsay Lohan skipped her latest court hearing. It was no big deal – she didn’t have to be there, and the only thing that happened was that her hilariously sketchy lawyer Mark Heller got reamed by the judge. After the judge called Heller “incompetent” and refused to dismiss LL’s charges, Heller gave a long-winded and especially nut-jobby press conference. Heller claimed Lindsay is completely sober AND she’s complying with a voluntary drug testing program. Which makes this report interesting:

Lindsay Lohan‘s attorney is hashing out a possible plea deal in his client’s lying to cops case — and it might not require the embattled starlet to go to rehab, which she has been adamantly opposed to, insisting she does NOT have a problem with drugs or alcohol, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

“A plea deal could be reached without Lindsay being forced to go into treatment,” a source tells Radar. “Since she wasn’t arrested or charged with crimes related to drugs or alcohol a plea deal requiring her to go to rehab isn’t the only way a resolution can be reached. There are other possibilities including the options of Lohan undergoing extensive counseling and lengthy community service.

“Talks between Mark Heller, and the City Attorney’s office are ongoing and both sides are hopeful a plea deal can be reached soon that is mutually agreeable.”

As RadarOnline.com previously reported, the troubled 26-year-old has been arrested twice for DUI and cocaine possession and has already been to rehab a whopping FIVE times since 2007 — three times by court order.

Lohan’s latest criminal trial is scheduled to begin on March 18 — even if acquitted she could still go to jail for up to 245 days for violating probation in her previous necklace theft case.

However, there is another pretrial hearing on Friday, “and it’s possible a plea deal could be reached by then,” the source says.

That Radar article also has the details of Lindsay’s previous FIVE rehab stays, just in case you want to take a walk through cracked-out memory lane. I remember some of those rehab stays – like the time (I think at the Betty Ford Clinic) when Lindsay assaulted one of the rehab employees because she (LL) had come in past curfew. Because she had been drinking. So what would be the big deal if completely-sober Lindsay was forced into rehab? Eh. Even if she was ordered to go to rehab again by some kind of plea deal, it wouldn’t matter. Lindsay always finds a way to party.

Meanwhile, Radar has another story about how Lindsay still owes poor Shawn Holley hundreds of thousands of dollars in back legal fees:

Despite media reports that circulated a month ago saying Lindsay Lohan was finally going to pay her $300k legal bill to her former attorney, Shawn Holley, RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned that the Mean Girls star still has not paid her!

“Lindsay hasn’t paid Shawn Holley one dime of her outstanding huge legal bill. Lindsay figures since Shawn refused to take her back as a client, it just isn’t a priority for the troubled starlet. Lindsay is in denial about her financial situation. She owes at least $200k in state and federal taxes and doesn’t have an income coming in right now. Who knows if Lindsay will ever pay Shawn,” a source told RadarOnline.com exclusively.

As we previously reported, Lohan, 26, owes her recently fired, long-standing criminal defense attorney, Shawn Holley, a whopping $300,000 plus in unpaid legal fees and hasn’t made a payment to the famed lawyer in more than half a year.

“Lohan should sell her designer handbags and clothes to start paying off Shawn Holley. Lindsay has at least 10 Hermes Birkin handbags, which sell for at least $15k, and dozens of Chanel, Fendi, Gucci, and Balenciaga handbags. It would be a step in the right direction for her to take,” the insider tells us.

That’s a point that gets brought up again and again in these threads – while Lindsay’s financial situation IS dire and completely crackie, it’s not like she doesn’t have stuff that she could sell or pawn or whatever. Remember, she’s a crack hoarder and a crack thief. She has storage units full of designer loot, and I’m sure she has several million dollars worth of jewelry too (at least). So… why not sell it? Is that stuff her rainy-day Crack Fund?

Look, she’s not going to jail or rehab for her lies and stuff. I wonder why everyone’s waiting for that to happen. CA is stretched as thin as it is and there are more pressing matters like killers and rapists to convict.

The only karma from all this shit LL has created is that she owes taxes and lost her looks. There is no comeback. This is it. There are 20 starlets that have already taken LL’s place.

I have to wonder though, that when she overdoses, will she be given the Anna Nicole treatment by the media? They practically painted Anna as a saint when she passed. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh but I just wonder if everyone will be singing about what a great actress she was and that she never had a chance.

Everyone has bent over backwards for her and all she does is take advantage of everything and everyone. She’s just a awful person with or without her childhood.

More pressing? If she kills an innocent bystander on her way to the bottom (or on her way out, which is equally likely), I doubt the family of the victim will think that it was less important to lock up this c-u-next-Tuesday.

And the reason I say on her way down, is because if her sorry azz isn’t in jail for a LONG while (more than days or a few weeks), then she hasn’t hit bottom yet.

I’ve said the same thing many times before, Izzy. I thought of the Cracken the other day — did any of you read the story about a young couple in Brooklyn who were killed by a hit and run driver? Very sad — the wife was 7 months pregnant, and although they did a C-section and delivered the baby, the baby died the next day too. Anyway, they have a suspect for the hit and run, and it’s a guy who has 8 prior convictions — including a DWI as recently as February! And yet he was allowed to drive around and do something like this. When I read the story, I thought I could absolutely envision La Lohan doing something like this. She is a murderess waiting to happen . . .but CA probably wouldn’t do anything to her even if she does kill someone.

As much as I agree, the fact is people don’t go to jail for what they “might” do. I’ve often thought the same about her, that “if” she continues this path she’ll kill someone. But she’s not going to an overcrowded, stretched-thin jail based on “if.”

Oh my God, that is one of the most horrifying stories I’ve ever heard. I didn’t know until now that the baby died too. It’s too heartbreaking. Look at the destruction that drunk drivers cause, & yet they keep driving.

This story has got me pretty steamed. This is why I get angry about Lohan still being out, driving, menacing society. This is something she could do, quite easily. Why aren’t the Judges she goes before putting a stop to it?

@pamspam, the thing is that Lohan (and many others) do commit a crime when they are DWI (or in her case, driving when she was barred from doing so). The justice system can’t punish them based on future crimes, but the penalty for a crime that has the potential to be deadly (like DWI) should be harsher than a slap on the wrist. Maybe if people had to do more than take a few classes or go to rehab (not even that, in her case), they would be less likely to drive while drunk. And certainly, in cases where someone has amassed multiple offenses, the punishment should be even harsher.

I think a lot of us have said that until she kills herself or someone else, she’ll have zero repercussions for her actions. I just hope she doesn’t kill an innocent person when it happens.

I read about that couple and their baby boy yesterday. I cried.

@Faye – I had a resident who got popped ONE TIME for a DUI, and she had to go to AA for at least a year; she lost her driver’s license for three years; her fines were astronomical; because of all of that, she nearly lost her job and custody of her daughter; and she said to me “Don’t ever drive under the influence of ANYTHING. I will NEVER do that again. It nearly ruined my life, and thank God I didn’t ruin anyone else’s.”

@the original bellaluna – That is a great example of the system working as it should, and someone learning from consequences. Why can’t CA do that with Lohan? Just because she’s a celeb?

A bit off-topic, but it isn’t just celebs who get away with DWIs. Like the case I cited in NY — the guy had 8 prior offenses (not all DWIs, some where) — why was he driving and allowed to have a license, when he had a DWI as recently as February? Like the drunk driver in Philadelphia who ran a curb and killed my 16-year-old cousin (right in front of my uncle and other cousins, his father and brother) — he got minimal time because it was a “first offense.” I know many others who have lost family and friends to drunk drivers.

In the case of Lohan, she has gotten away with so much. I don’t even care about her anymore; let her drink and drug herself to her heart’s content. But keep her away from a car.

It floors me that people with prior offenses/convictions are still allowed a license. Unfortunately, even when a DUI driver’s license has been revoked, it doesn’t stop them from driving. (Unless their car’s been totaled or repo’d.)

If there are “more pressing matters,” why even file charges against her in the first place? We all get that CA is effed up and that the DA doesn’t want to spend one more penny on Lindsay in court or in jail. So the million dollar question becomes, WHY even bother to pursue this charge after 6 months? There’s got to be a reason.

I hope it is insurance fraud, personally, which would lead to more charges. But that’s just me.

There’s no rehab for her kind of crazy, anyway. I don’t think there’s any way to treat or cure narcissistic personality disorder.
I think this girl should be institutionalized. She’s literally insane and untreatable. She’s only a danger to society. Jail isn’t the place for her, neither is a rehab spa. She just needs to be committed because she’s freaking crazy doesn’t want to get better, probably can’t, and there’s a huge risk of her hurting anyone in her path. She is extremely destructive.
I know not all people suffering mental illness are like her. Most people who are live good, meaningful lives. But most people don’t clip baby strollers and yell ‘move that cone, I’m Lindsay Lohan.’

Rehab is pointless. I’m reluctant to call her crazy. I think we overuse that word. She is capable of knowing what is right and wrong. The difference is she CHOOSES to do wrong and doesn’t care.

To me, crazy means seeing things that aren’t there, hearing voices, etc – stuff that is uncontrollable. She is perfectly able to control her actions. The problem is that she refuses to acknowledge her role and wrongdoings. And quite frankly, it’s worked out well for her so far. She still makes more than some doctors do in a year and always seems to get 2nd and 3rd and 4th chances. Even when she makes a bad decision like switching lawyers, it still seems to be working out for her.

There really is no point in rehab at this point because she doesn’t feel like she has a problem. The only thing from the gov that seems to work is the IRS. Hopefully, they will jail her ass. I don’t believe the CA system will though. I think the DA wants to but his hands are tied with budgets and whatnot.

She’s entitled because everyone around her treats her like she’s something special. Truth is, I’m not even sure that I wouldn’t feel entitled if I was a child star. I think her worst fate would be the day when the media treats her like Paris Hilton. I think she enjoys her courtroom drama because it keeps her relevant at this point.

Why isn’t Shawn going after Lindsay for her money? In fact why hasn’t anybody taken her to task? Most people get chased over much less then what she owes. Just cause she is “sober” now doesn’t mean she will stay it I also doubt she really is. Maybe she has gotten a little smarter about being caught but we all know that won’t last.

I think her lawyer has told her to lay low because he is trying to get her off with the defense that she has changed her life and wants to “help” others. Partying at home (whereever that may be) is not good either. I don’t believe she is sober either.

Owing $ to a lawyer is one thing, owing it to the IRS is another. She just may get “rehab” in the form of some prison time for tax fraud if she doesn’t pay up and/or keeps getting paid for “work” in cash…

I keep hoping that too, I think that’s the best chance of her getting locked up. The courts don’t seem to care that she’s a danger on the roads and keeps breaking probation. The IRS is much more tough though.

The Cracken put the $100k from Charlie Sheen towards her tax bill. Perhaps the IRS is more willing to work with her now on her back taxes.

Maybe there’s a better chance of the Cracken getting brought down by not reporting her income from “appearances”. There are also theories that she’s been depositing the money from her “cash only” transactions in her brother Michael’s bank account.

Those luxury items will be the last things to go. And only if she’s forced to sell them by claimants. Lohan’s all about fronting like she’s still living the good life even if everyone already knows how broke she is. Remember how embarassed she was by the report of her living in Long Island with her mom because she cannot rent? That’s the kind of thing she is humilated by, not the reports of her unprofessionalism or bar fights. The idea that people think she is broke is unbearable for her.

TBH though, I wouldn’t buy anything she has used. Hazmat concerns aside, we all know that this woman cannot take care of her things. She has no respect for property, even her own. Her stuff will all be dirty and ripped and stained.

Doubt the handbags fair any better w/ her than the rest of her things. Remember the Hermes Lohan used on her flight to New York to shoot those bonding scenes w/ her new wanna be mentor ole Charlie for Scary movie 5? That poor bag was so stuffed full of junk & carelessly thrown in the seat & that was even before she had arrived there. Imagine how abused that bag was by the time said trip was over, she strikes me as a sloppy drunk..bet her bags also have alcohol spillage & drug residue on/in them.

There were reports that the Cracken had not paid her fees in months and the storage company was about to confiscate her property. I wonder if the Cracken managed to pay up since we haven’t heard anything about it since that time.

No, not directly but you can absolutely go to prison for tax evasion. It’s just that now the process is incredibly long and arduous. The IRS has legal channels they need to go through as well as laws that must be followed in the prosecution of tax evaders. The problem is once they nail you for it for one year they can and will take a look at every other year to see if they can nail you for those as well.

She won’t sell/pawn her designer goods and, mostly likely ill-gotten, jewelry because she feels entitled to them. In her mind she’s still a glamorous starlet who should have the best of everything and everyone should let her do whatever she wants because she’s a STAHH DAHLING.

For the folks that keep saying the CA system is stretched, let her go free:

1. by putting her in jail, at least for awhile, would save thousands, if not millions of dollars. The cost of the DA’s and state of CA (and now NY) everytime this person gets hauled into court (isnt she up to 21 court appearances now?) is staggering. Save some money, throw her in jail and let her reflect there without drugs, enablers, etc.

2. If this was anyone else, they would have been in jail 2-3+ times already for hard time. Maybe not long stretches, but definately some time served.

They should really look at Robert Dowey Jrs case. He really turned his life around when the courts finally stepped up and threw him in the jail for a stretch.

I rather think her life is already worse than being in prison. She is the one who has to face all the ‘what ifs??’ and the ‘could have been a contender’ moments. I think she looks at her contemporaries – especially Jennifer Lawrence and Amanda Seyfried and realizes they had the roles and the acclaim which might have been hers had she not fucked up her life so much.

I think she is probably just angry at other actresses for stealing parts that she believes were rightfully hers. Remember when she said she should have had Natalie Portrman’s role in Black Swan? She never, ever seems to look inward to discover why things are going badly for her. It is always other people who target her, or steal from her, or hate her.

If it’s true she is staying out of jail by blackmailing someone powerful, we only have a year and a half until the statue of limitations is up and the person/people who did it are no longer in danger of prosecution. I know and you know she’ll never clean up her act by then.

California

Civil Statute of Limitations

Special Childhood Sexual Abuse SOL : 26 years old (18 years old + 8 years).

Limited Discovery Rule : 3 years. Actions against a person for committing childhood sexual abuse may be brought “within 3 years of the date the plaintiff discovers or reasonably should have discovered that psychological injury or illness occurring after the age of majority was caused by the sexual abuse”.

1 Year Window : From January 1, 2003.

Criminal Statute of Limitations

Delayed SOL for most sex crimes against victims less than 16 : Until victim is 28 years old. Allows prosecutions for a number of felony sex crimes (sodomy, oral copulation, and sexual penetration of victims less than 16, and performing lewd or lascivious acts against a child under the age of 14) committed against victims younger than 18 to be brought any time before the victim’s 28th birthday.

Reporting Window: 1 year : After the above SOL has expired, prosecutions for a sexual crime committed against a victim younger than 18 may be brought within 1 year of the date a report is filed with a state law enforcement agency. In this case, the allegations must be corroborated by some sort of hard evidence rather than the victim’s own testimony.

Say what…several million dollars of jewelry to sell???? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Crackie has probably STOLEN several million dollars in jewelry-I’ll grant you that-but she ain’t got none of it left. It was fenced years ago to keep her in the lifestyle she had grown accustomed to but could no longer afford through legal means. And now that she only graces the covers of tabloids, Crackie doesn’t have access to all the expensive shiny baubles used in fashion mags photo shoots anymore, so she has no “new” merchandise to fence. That’s why she’s been going on “paid” dates to finance her lifestyle. And as far as Crackie owning several Hermes birkins-I’ve seen only 2(and only 1 of these consistantly). Now she does have several Chanel and Balenciaga bags and they do go quickly on the 2ndary market but they have to be in near mint condition. Since everything she touches turns to shyt, who here thinks these bags are mint? And as for selling her “high end” wardrobe, when is the last time you have seen her in the latest Prada dress. I’ll tell you when-years ago when she used to wear a different one everyday. Back then she could afford 8k for a RTW Prada dress(those were her favorite). Not much money in dresses that are 5 yrs old. Her clothes of late has been from nondescript designers and they don’t command much on the 2ndary market. From where I’m sitting, the only things of “value” I see her wearing are a few pairs of Loubies and Walter Steiger shoes and a nice Celine purse. Now who would buy shoes that hoofed Crackie’s feet? And as for the Celine purse, she might be able to get 1.5K out of it. So yes, I guess she could sell it-but she better hurry because soon it will be “last season”,too.

Wasn’t she trying to sell her designer duds via her sister to a second-hand shop awhile back? I seem to remember Allie leaving in a huff because they wouldn’t pay top dollar for the vodka stained, smelly clothes. But do you really think she has millions of dollars worth of jewelry? Maybe hundreds of thousands but not a million. Also since she stole most of it – she would have to sell it on the black market for a 60% reduction in price. And why hasn’t the IRS confiscated the contents of her lockers? I thought they could do that. Maybe not, I’m not sure.

For God’s sake, what is it going to TAKE? This girl has done 100s of hours of CommServ, has been in therapy, rehab 5 times, and NOTHING HAS WORKED! This b*tch needs to go to jail and stay there and think about things. She absolutely DOES have problems with drugs and alcohol, and I am sick to death of her denying it and getting away with incident after incident because the California justice system can’t get its collective head out of its collective a$$ and see she deserves to be locked up! NO ONE else would have gotten this many chances and I’d like to know what it is about this useless piece of trash that allows her to consistently avoid the punishment she so richly deserves???

I don’t think it’s about solving LiLo’s problems so much as the CA justice system’s problems. We’re releasing actual real criminals (sex offenders, felony violence) early because we “can’t afford” or “there’s no room” to keep them. There are probably thousands of LiLos every year who get her same judicial treatment. In a nutshell, it goes back to a court decision that we’re not treating the prisoners well enough at older prisons, and no one will build new prisons. So if there’s a deal to be made, they’ll make it, so they don’t have to pay for her care. It’s an effin’ hippie paradise up in here.

That whole check-in and release system is outrageous. I’d be packing up the wagon and heading out of CA if that was the best justice they have. The taxes are ungodly and pubic services are shite. But for the Lilo’s and the OJ’s of Hollywierd it is paradise.

Even the cops who were at the hospital said they smelled strong liquor on her breath but they didn’t test her then because they believed her story that she was a passenger and it isn’t illegal to be drunk in the passenger seat. The unbelievable luck this POS has is staggering.

You know, a part of me has always thought that, underneath, in that deep dark place inside of Lohan, is a nice person struggling to get out. Take away the bad childhood, the crappy parents, the success too early, and you would find a sweet girl.

Nothing is going to be done about this disgusting waste of oxygen! UNTIL she kills someone. I only hope its herself and not some innocent bystander.

I had to ID my uncle after he was killed by a repeat drunk driver. I was 21 then. I’m 29 and the bag of sh*t is already out of jail. But that’s OK. He went to Northwestern and drove daddy’s Ferrari. So his life mattered so much more than my uncle.

This is a milestone for me: It’s the first Lindsay story I haven’t been even remotely tempted to snark about. And I think it was Charlie Sheen who helped squash that last wee little light of hope I had for LiLo. I knew she was crackie. But crackie enough to spit publicly on a once and possibly future wealthy benefactor who could solve all (but one) of her problems with one painless check? (Even if he is a fellow crackie? That means free crack!) And turning down all the publicity that would go along with such a relationship? Oh-my-God-UBER-idiot.

It’s official I hate her & come March 18th it will be even more official I will hate her even more. it will be feeding the beast, she will walk away like she is untouchable. Well she is untouchable in a hazmatzy kinda way.

Does this state not recall the circus surrounding all the previous times she was given community service, probation, and/or mandatory AA meetings? She ran circles around the court, failing to show up, lying about showing up, showing up then leaving, tossing excuse after excuse after excuse about why she couldn’t fulfill the court-ordered punishment… Of course, if they do let her off with this stuff again, it will be another bag of gold nuggets for gossip sites like this and comedians and talk show hosts.