Monday, 12 October 2009

A "return " to traditional values?

I find it interesting to read that, in this particular report anyway, it's the youngsters who want to return to family meals, less television, etc. I know that when my two have friends round here, they are all fascinated by the way we live - no television now, lots growing in the garden, unschooling,the home brew (typical - some things never change lol), homemade packed lunches for college, the various livestock, houseful of spinning wheels, knitting wool, bags of apples all over the place, old Rayburn, unfitted kitchen, (unfitted lol)mother who doesn't drive or go out to work, no exotic holidays away, relaxed atmosphere, lots going on, lots of laughter and jokes, homemade cakes and fudge............... that's our life. Some of us have never strayed far from these traditional values, but it's very encouraging to know that they are still highly regarded, especially by the next generation; almost gives me hope! It would be nice to think some of their interest and enthusiasm would rub off on their parents/grandparents. I'm not one for telling folks how to live their lives - what to do, what to buy, what they shouldn't be spending *their* money on, how to conduct themselves - I'll leave that for the holier than thou bloggers and forum posters out there who use the internet as a form of preaching to say *you should be doing this*, you * should be doing that*, making this, *not* doing/buying that, well, *I* can do it - why can't you?

For me, it's about education, not coercion and guilt inducing rantings, and yes, I do try to lead by example, but without ramming it down peoples' throats. I'm not perfect, and I try to get my own house in order before I feel able to comment on others' choices; sometimes it's in order in some departments, some times it's not. Everyone's circumstances are different, and everyone just has to get on as best they can within the constraints imposed upon them. I sometimes think pictures on the net can be as misleading as those in the stylish glossy magazines - all set up for a photo shoot, implying that the whole house/place is permanently in a state of cleanliness, ironedness and put awayness, some sort of holy grail of perfection to be strived for. Is yours? Mine isn't.:) As usual, it's the face that is presented on the net - what goes on behind the scenes isn't shown, and is often more interesting, and always more important than a sham face shown to the world, in my view. I'm not saying it isn't lovely and inspiring to look at great close ups of flowers, baking, something hand crafted, latest reading material - I just try to stay aware that behind the nice shot is often a long way short of perfection!!

I suppose what I'm getting at is that it's a waste of time and life pretending to be something you're not; if you want traditional meals, make them happen; if you want to watch less TV, turn it off; get out the board games; grow some veg; knit some dishcloths. If you don't enjoy these things or can't fit them into your current life, then don't do them - leave these things until the time is right, or not at all. No guilt should be involved just because you buy your dishcloths instead of making them yourself;but it's better for judgements not to be made on others' choices for a whole host of reasons, and such judgements usually say more about the judger than the judged. Similarly, I find it hard to stomach the catty and snide comments from people who would like to do these things and more, but can't for any number of reasons ( which is fine by me), but seem hellbent on doing down, criticising and being downright nasty to those of us who make these choices (which is not fine by me) - envy and jealousy are great time and life wasters.

Each to their own, and we all have choice.

As for me, I'll keep on keeping on, and if I inspire some folks along the way, that's great; conversely if folks think I'm a batty old doot, then that's fine too, but there's no need for the nastiness, just let me be, as I let you be.

Coming full circle to the original theme, I'm glad that these findings have been publicised, to show that not everyone is hellbent on living what we are told is a "21st century lifestyle" - there are as many of these as there are people on the planet.

Tolerance, education and compromise, try to do as you would be done by.

I would just like to say a big thankyou, however, to whoever invented the macro lense on my digital camera, so you can't see the piles of washing when I photogrpah my jam ;) lol

7 comments:

absolutely agree with your point about catty and 'doing down' remarks. I left a forum for just that reason - I was told that my full time mum brand of eco/authentic/insert label of choice here/ living could be offensive to working women. I didn't count as I wasn't juggling work as well as baking and livestock. We all have choices at the end of the day. I refuse to creep around apologising for being happy just as I am.

Actually I'm sure that in part that's what it is - our society and culture doesn't know what to do with people being happy just as they are.

Hello Julie! Nice to see you again, it's been a while:) I've been keeping up with your adventures, though.:)We all count, don't we, regardless of whether we have an "approved labe" or not. Agree totally with your last comment.

It is hardly surprising that young people want to return to past values when we have been ruled by the money god and 'must have' advertising messengers for too long. It has been a revelation to me being retired and I have enjoyed growing and preserving my own veg, getting my sewing machine out of the loft, after 20 years, and using lost skills that lay dormant for years. I am sure a lot of people think Mr M and I are dotty old dears but we love life as it is. It wouldn't suit everyone and that is fine by us. You certainly inspire me and thank you for your interesting posts; I so look forward to reading them.

For lots of us it is a balancing act. I don't think I would get away with getting rid of the TV, but I am happy to know that my children are growing up with life skills like growing and cooking food,knitting, sewing and carpentry.It's such a shame that so many of these skills are no longer passed down through families and I think many children have a real fascination for these things, given the chance.

I was directed to your blog by a friend when she shared your news link! It's a good article and I've shared it on Facebook and my blog. It's a shame that people get nasty isn't it, I always think it's either jealousy or just plain ignorance! If you don't mind I would like to follow your blog. Have a great day

Welcome to my blog

Open on my lap

This is an uncopyrighted blog!

I'm happy to share freely whatever is posted up here on Unbought Delicacies - feel free to copy and share recipes, patterns, my pictures, tips, etc - I really don't mind, and like to think that my advice and experiences learned over the years is being shared with a wider audience. If there's anything I don't want copied or shared, it won't appear here.

This is me............

I have found such joy

I have found such joy in simple things;A plain, clean room, a nut-brown loaf of bread,A cup of milk, a kettle as it sings,The shelter of a roof above my head,And in a leaf-laced square along the floor,Where yellow sunlight glimmers through the door.I have found such joy in things that fillMy quiet days: a curtain's blowing grace,A potted plant upon my window sill,A rose, fresh-cut and placed within a vase;A table cleared, a lamp beside a chair,And books I long have loved beside me there.Oh, I have found such joys I wish I mightTell every woman who goes seeking farFor some elusive, feverish delight,That very close to home the great joys are:The elemental things- old as the race,Yet never, through the ages, commonplace.

Handmade books, personalised printed notepaper and envelopes.Hamper of bits and bobs from the above lists, packed in a pretty lined basket.

I'll add some more as and when I think of them; These can be used all year round and easily tailored to the recipient - everyone loves a homemade gift. :)

Currently on the needles

Autumn leaves scarf

Crochet blanket/s

Shetland Fairisle kits

Dishcloths

Wartime Farm Fairisle top

Inspiring thoughts.............

I saw a man, an old Cilician, who occupied an acre or two of land that no one wanted.A patch not worth the ploughing, unrewarding for flocks, unfit for vineyards;he, however, by planting here and there among the scrub cabbages or white lilies and verbena and flimsy poppies, fancied himself a king in wealth, and coming home late in the evening, loaded his board with unbought delicacies.Virgil

I had no theories to prove. I merely wanted to try living by my own hands, independently as far as possible from a system of division of labour in which the participant loses most of the pleasure of making and growing things for himself. I wanted to bring in my own fuel and smell its sweet smell as it burned in the hearth I had made. I wanted to grow my own food, or forage after it. In short I wanted to do as much as I could for myself, because I had already realised from partial experience the inexpressible joy of doing so.