Monday, February 27, 2012

The House of Sick and Well

First, thanks for all the comments. Sorry to be so quiet, just crazy to the max over here.

I am doing well. I saw the endo and I've been discharged unless things suddenly slide backwards, which, you know, is actually possible and scares the shit out of me. But I was glad to leave a doctor's office on an optimistic note for once.

The endo agrees that I will need to stress dose for illness and that I may have to play exercise by ear, but the fact that my system now shows some ability to stabilize itself is good. I didn't have that ability even last summer when I stopped steroids and was supposedly 'cured', so this is good progress and took nine months.

Damn, just counted that out. Kind of slow, no?

Anyway, onward and upward. I just hope my endo has learned as much as I have about this adrenal shiznit.

I did get them to laugh. They had tested my thyroid last visit and when they said the results were normal, I snorted and said, "Of course, thyroid would be too normal and easy."

Doesn't seem so funny when I write it out, but I believe that if I can make someone laugh, we'll get along okay.

The toddler is sick and managed to get us all worried last night when she bloomed a huge red... hive? on her cheek. Pink eye came with a nasty cold for her and she's not getting better, just morphing into different kinds of sick.

She stopped eating or caring about food on Saturday which, that never happens. Whether she actually eats anything or not is immaterial, this kid bugs me for food like she's part labrador retriever. Half the time she doesn't even eat it. So I notice when she's not nagging me about lunch two hours early.

I flirted with that cold a lot myself and was quite adrenal on Saturday, but decided not to take steroids unless I got worse. I wheezed a bit. Hacked a bit and now seem fine? So a win for my immune system.

Other than that, I'm good. Toddler is adorable. OMG. She kills us. She is so bossy and funny right now. I keep forgetting to write down all her best lines to preserve them for posterity. We're so senile, we have pillow talk about how cute and funny she is before we go to sleep, but neither of us can remember what she actually said.

Writing has been interesting. I am making money and I continue to work furiously to position myself to make more. However, whenever individuals make any serious money online, corporate interests move in to seize the pie. There's a lot of market consolidation now, which is resulting in fewer avenues of distribution and less opportunity for independent writers.

Big Business realized we could take their space on best seller lists and get our own movie deals (not me, others) and they have made a series of competitive strikes the last few weeks. I think they thought that their eye for quality was so precise that independent authors were surely all dreck and a non issue in terms of competition. To their surprise, they've missed quite a few gems and are getting spanked online.

Having observed this business pattern before, I would say that the golden era of being an independent author is dimming. If you were toying with the idea, don't wait too much longer.

Support a Patient

Lost in the Desert

Patient Cliff Notes

I'm categorized as a severe persistent asthmatic* and I have a history of HPA axis suppression due to steroids used to treat the asthma.

Doctors miss the HPA axis suppression every time and actively fight me on it. I've had am cortisols of 1 and 6 and ACTH of less than 5, yet the doctors still can't get on board. The medical myopia and general lack of adrenal knowledge is horrifying.

How did I ever get diagnosed? I took premed classes for 2 years (during a health upswing) and figured it out.

I thought since previous rounds of suppression have been so well documented, I wouldn't have a problem again. I was wrong.

I've been fighting the current round of Secondary Adrenal Insufficiency since March 2010. It has eviscerated my ability to work and to function as a normal human being. Which sucks since I have a toddler who just wants her momma to play with her.

*eh... I bet it'll go back to moderate persistent, once the excitement of last year's hospitalization dies down.

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