Tube Tops

Harry Epstein lives in Golder’s Green and commutes to downtown London every day. London being the rainy city that it is, Harry always had a number of umbrellas in the house. One morning, Harry woke up and realized that his wife had taken all of their umbrellas to the repair shop so he left home empty handed.

On the “tube” that morning on the way to the office, when he got up to leave, Harry absentmindedly laid hold of the umbrella belonging to a woman beside him, as he was in the habit of carrying one.

The woman cried "Stop thief!" rescued her umbrella and Harry cowered in embarrassment.

On the way home from work, Harry stopped at the repair shop, and picked up all eight of his umbrellas, now in tip top shape. As he entered the tube with the unwrapped umbrellas tucked under his arm, he was horrified to behold glaring at him the lady of his morning adventure. Her voice came to him charged with a withering scorn: