New Jersey

Summer Saturdays on The Purple Stuff Podcast is going strong. Matt and I have been making the best of the scorching hot days on the pod. In the background all I can think about is how the Halloween season is almost here. Knowing that my favorite season is creeping up on us is fueling me although first, we’ve got to make it through these hot summer days. We do just that on the new episode of the podcast. This episode finds us at the local Flea Market.

Englishtown Flea Market is basically the Mos Eisley of New Jersey sans the spaceport aspect. Sum and Villainy you know what I’m saying. Of course I’m kidding, everyone who sells there is usually very nice, or as nice as someone can be when standing outside in the dirt in 97 degree heat selling 3 old picture frames and a plugged tire from a 1990 Toyota Corolla. Matt and I have been frequenting this place for a while and we decided that we’d pay them a visit as part of our Summer Saturdays series of shows. Flea Markets can take place all year round obviously, but here in the trip-state area, the outdoor jams are pretty much exclusive to the summer months. No one wants to be shopping for bootleg power rangers in -12 degrees wearing snow boots. It’s probably just as abysmal as it is in the heat and humidity though!

We made it through and each grabbed a few things that we discuss on the show. At this point, anything we wind up doing turns into a freaking debacle and this one was a fun one. Maybe while I was there sweating my ass off covered in dirt it didn’t seem like that much of a blast, but listen in and you’ll get a feel for an authentic, outdoor Jersey flea market. There’s an array of junk we came home with, we whip out loot bags, tape cleaners, we open up some trading cards, and even do a taste test, not of the cards obviously.

Take a listen wherever you enjoy your podcasts! We appreciate any positive reviews you feel like leaving and as always, spread the word! If you know someone who is like us, tell them about the podcast, they may dig it. Thank you for being on board, it’s way more fun this way. We also have a Patreon where you can get monthly bonus shows if you want MORE! Keep cool, we will be back next week!

In many ways, I’ve spent my life prepping for the crap that Dino Drac and I discuss on the Purple Stuff Podcast. Who knew that all those hours as a couch potato on those summer days that were too sweltering to even swim under the sun would actually prove to be useful someday. Well, useful is a stretch, but all those memories certainly fuels our Mr. Fusion of inconsequential nostalgia. For a little trip back in time to when TV sitcoms ruled our world and they were only available through that giant box in your living room, dial up our first TV Theme Songs show from May 2016!

If you don’t need the refresher, well, as Freddy said, WELCOME TO PRIME TIME BITCH! We’ve got 10 TV Themes to discuss and dissect. We don’t only talk about the music, we also get into the details of the actual intros themselves in some cases. No matter what, these are some oddball choices as always. You’ll hear everything from Harry and The Hendersons to Jem! Things are about to get weird so take a listen on your favorite podcast app. Thank you for listening and feel free to add your favorite TV Themes in the comments!

If you dig the show and would like to support the show you can share the show on social media, or recommend The Purple Stuff Podcast to one of your friend IRL! So many people I know are through with social media altogether that you may want to have an actual convo with them and say “Hey, this is a show I enjoy listening to and you may like it as well!” If you aren’t into that option, we would love it if you could give us a 5 star rating on iTunes. And last but not least, you can support us on Patreon for an exclusive monthly bonus show! www.Patreon.com/PurpleStuff Thanks again for listening and reading!

Finding quirky and offbeat stuff to do for Halloween seems to be super easy for me. Christmas on the other hand, there doesn’t seem to be nearly as much going on. It’s ironic to think about because Christmas is such a mega holiday in terms of spending and venturing out to holiday themed events with the fam. As you may have guessed, I’m not really one for the typical nonsense. For example, I ice skated once in my life and although I didn’t bust my ass, I felt like any second I could plummet into the darkest regions of hell. It was not fun. Sliding around in circles on ice, while balancing on a thin, sharp blade is not my idea of fun, especially in the cold. Going to see the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree is always an annual “must” for locals, but I’ve been there, done that a million times. Nowadays it’s even more of a hassle because the vicinity around the tree is so crowded with tourists, and as crotchety as that makes me sound, it’s even worse than you could imagine. I get claustrophobic in crowds and it isn’t just there, Manhattan in general during the holidays that gets overwhelmingly packed with people. So not my jam.

I had way more fun lounging on the couch sipping Diet Cranberry Ginger Ale and watching The Christmas Chronicles on Netflix than I could ever have battling holiday traffic and crowds. Ugh, such nonsense! If I sound like Scrooge, then I can’t argue. Recently, an esteemed colleague at work affirmed this very sentiment for me. She told me that during the holidays she goes away to Florida to her summer home (must be nice!) and for the entire stretch of the season she relaxes with her husband and they literally don’t do a damn thing except snack and watch movies on the couch. She went even deeper to declare that is what the holidays are all about for her. Not to beat a dead horse, but I recently learned that my co-host on The Purple Stuff Podcast, Matt from Dino Drac, feels the exact same way.

While I always consider myself a champion of vegetating on the couch whenever possible, conversely I may be a bigger proponent of devising elaborately stacked plans of themed things to do. What can I say? Points of interest pique my interest and Clark Griswold has always been one of my idols. Maximizing the fun is one of my main objectives in life.

I didn’t want to piss this holiday season away without some actual merry making. After a lot of useless Googling, it felt like finding a unique, Christmassy thing to do in Jersey was becoming hopeless. But, right around the moment when I was about to give up, we drove passed Maple Leaf Farms on the way home one night. I noticed a sign that said “Christmas Wonderland,” as I swung an abrupt General Lee style turn into the parking lot. The building’s exterior is similar to any other run of the mill country store, except for being adorned with an over-sized, inflatable Santa Claus. The best part about this is that I had no idea what to expect inside. Would it be a bunch of crafts, wooden soldier centerpieces, and cinnamon sticks OR would we be delighted by a decked out display of endearing decor? That sentence was Heavy on the D.

Watch the video to see what I discovered inside the Christmas Wonderland. If you don’t have 5 minutes to spare, it was a sight to behold and totally lived up to its namesake! This traditional walk through, accompanied by a laid back Christmas playlist running throughout the space, is comprised of animatronics that the proprietor has rescued from old store window displays, malls, and various other means. He restored them superficially as well as their electronic components inside that made them seem magically alive in their heyday. It’s like he is a human droid factory. After speaking with him about his undying attention to detail and his commitment to the Christmas spirit, his goal was creating a vintage Christmas vibe and he succeeded, and then some.

My nostalgia needle was off the charts in this place. In a world of Nintendo Switch and Occulus Rift, these old school animatronic characters may not bowl a lot of you over since our technology expectations are so far beyond them, but these are the kind of novelties that I absolutely love to gaze at. My affection for them can be likened to why I love the old Telco Motionettes. Those were like the home versions of these little dudes! Inside the Wonderland, the snowmen move in slow motion, Goofy’s arm goes up and down, and there’s even a little tribute to the time Santa conquered those Martians! Snow covered Christmas trees are set up in every corner and adorning the pipe and draped halls leading to each next display were actual Christmas themed product ad posters from the old days bestowing that extra spoonful of authenticity. Just when you think it’s over, the finale leads you to a BIG room with the BIG jolly man himself. That’s right, pictures with Santa are included with your minimal entrance fee.

Experiencing this throwback to simpler times was a much needed little break from the world. Take the family on a little drive to Manalapan, NJ down route 9 for a dose of Christmas cheer before the season is out and see for yourself. There’s a TON of heart and LOADS of Christmas spirit poured into this and making it a success will ensure that it continues every year!

I’d be lying if I said The Purple Stuff Podcast has been on an exotic summer vacation. Truth is, we’ve been simply gearing up for the BIG season, you know, the only season that matters! That’s right, believe it or not, Halloween time is here and I’ve got shivers up and down my spine at the mere thought of it all. Haunted attractions, pumpkin spice everything (yes I am a fan), horror movies on loop, hoodies, and of course, the soundtrack to it all: SPOOKY SONGS! Dino Drac and I have teamed up once again to bring you a collection of tunes that you can slide right into your Fall and Halloween playlists. This episode is available right now from iTunes, Stitcher, and Podbean etc. Check it out and subscribe to the show if you haven’t already.

You’ll hear some absolute treasures in this episode that you may not have known even existed. There’s a metal injected TV theme song, a satirical sequel to a classic, and even a track based off an old toy line. In the end, they’re all excellent choices to incorporate into your Halloween playlist this year. We had a blast with this episode so we hope you will to! If you have any spooky musical suggestions for us, leave them below in the comments! Thanks for reading and listening!

The newest episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast is a big one. It’s all about some of the most outstanding ice cream and frozen treats. You need not be an expert on every single offering in your grocer’s freezer or every single Good Humor variation displayed on the side of your neighborhood ice cream truck to enjoy this one. Once you start thinking about your favorite frozen treats from throughout your life, the floodgates open. This is what happened to Matt and I in this episode. There were so many great ones that we had to try to squeeze them all in!

There’s a brain freezing treat awaiting everyone who listens to this one. Maybe you dig Italian ices? Maybe you are a soft serve type of person? Or you may be a fan of one of the more obscure ice pops that was only sold in one section of the world in 1991? No matter what, it’s pretty safe to say that everyone has a special spot for some kind of frozen treat so this one celebrates that. Memories of hot summer days chasing down the ice cream truck will rush back into your mind. Remember when you would eat a colored ice cream pop and your mouth, lips, and tongue all turned that color? Fortunate for us, the summer is almost here so we are celebrating that feeling by digging deep into our memories and telling you all about a slew of our ultimate Ice Cream entries.

In this episode we will touch on everything from shark pops to alien cakes to great balls of ice cream. It’s a creamy and delicious audio compendium of our favorite frozen treats. Please subscribe on iTunes, Stitcher, Google Play Music or Podbean, OR you can check it out at the link above!

It’s that time of the year again! The weather starts cutting out the below zero temps and gives us that Spring feeling of being alive again. Although the Fall is by far my favorite season, Spring is second, but not because of blooming flowers…because of booming bodyslams! That’s right, its time to celebrate the WWE’s grandest event of the year, WrestleMania! Even if the last time you watched WWE was when Stone Cold Steve Austin was still the champ, you can still hop back on board at any time. Right now is the best time because WrestleMania is always a fun time. Hardcore fans dissect every event and suck the goodness out of everything, but this is one block of 4 hours each year that I dive completely into the pro-wrestling zone and enjoy it as if I were 5 years old again. It’s actually pretty refreshing, and maybe even more-so if you are not super into the WWE world. If you aren’t jaded to all of it you may even have more of a blast than many of us critical bastards! Regardless, here are 6 tips on maximizing your WrestleMania day:

Eliminate interruptions. You may be tempted to hop on Twitter or scroll through your Instagram feed during any lulls, but trust me, it can wait. You’ll have time during the Kid Rock promo so plan the social media breaks strategically. Many bands have banned cell phones at their concerts, so take a cue from The Misfits and enjoy WrestleMania as if it was the ’80s and early ’90s when you weren’t bogged down by the damn phone. I’m sure I will get texts during the show, but unless it’s an emergency, it can wait! When The Goddess is on TV, everything else gets put on hold.

2. Drink. Doesn’t have to be liquor. If you aren’t into that, get a lot of Root Beer or Mountain Dew on ice. You will need to have an excuse to run to the bathroom if a match starts to bore you out of your smoking skull. (that’s a Stone Cold reference if you didn’t catch it!)

3. Set up a comfortable viewing area, but not too comfortable! You want the pillows and blankets, but don’t accidentally promote a sleeping environment for you and your squad. This is a mistake. There’s plenty of time for that later on. If this is your first WWE event in a while, it will feel like it’s 17 hours.

4. Food! You can actually get winded just by living vicariously through watching these super athletes do what they do best so you will need nourishment. My advice is to balance out the crap with some good healthy stuff. Sounds boring, but you’ll thank me afterward! If you’re eating nothing but garbage all day and night, by the end of the event you’ll want to bust. You’ll feel like an alien is ripping out of your stomach. It’s worthwhile to cut up some fruits and veggies and drink water here and there. You have to pace yourself between all the Doritos and buffalo wings.

5. Treat the day like it’s a holiday. For me, WrestleMania has always been a holiday. To some, The Super Bowl is the big day, but for me this is monumental. Even if it winds up sucking, there’ so much excitement and enthusiasm on this day. The memories of Mania’s past come rushing back and you can enjoy them all day long if you have the WWE Network. With all great holidays, reminiscing is a major part of them and this is no different. You might wear an ugly sweater to a Christmas party, so be sure to wear your favorite Wrestler’s t-shirt or hat. I can’t forget this one, the music! We listen to Christmas carols during Christmas and spooky music during Halloween, so get your bluetooth speaker out and stream WWE music all day long, heck, all weekend long! And since you’re going to be up late and all pumped, think about taking the next day off. They won’t kill you.

6. LISTEN TO THE NEWEST EPISODE OF THE PURPLE STUFF PODCAST! The newest episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast is all about inconsequential aspects of all the WrestleManias so far. Matt from Dinosaur Dracula and I have compiled 10 pieces of minutiae that we find interesting enough to talk about for an hour. Topics include, The Undertaker’s outrageous act, A whacked out Piper’s Pit, The Mistress of the Dark, and the greatest pro wrestling entrance of all time! Check it out on iTunes, Stitcher, Podbean, and the Google Play store! Thanks for tuning in.

Now, let’s take you down to our broadcasting team of Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse “The Body” Ventura…

The latest episode of The Purple Stuff Podcast is available now! Get primed for the big game by listening to Matt and I bullshit about some of our favorite Super Bowl commercials ever. In addition to the junk food, the commercials are often the highlight of watching the Super Bowl. It’s the one time that I actually watch commercials and not escape to the kitchen or head to the bathroom. The multimillion dollar ads can be sentimental, funny, and downright strange, but so many of them have been pretty epic. They better be for the price that was paid to air them! In this episode we cover everything from car commercials to a couple of incredible Diet Pepsi and Coca Cola ads as well as beer bottles and cans playing their own game of football. From there we’ve got a pertinent movie trailer and a heavenly old school AV geek store…it’s all here. I’m sure you have your own set of favorites and even most hated, but no matter what, they get us all talking about them. Dive in via your favorite Podcast app or listen at the link above. Thanks for listening!

It’s that special time of the year again! The time of year where we reminisce about how hysterical it was when the shitter was full, when people get together and wear intentionally lame sweaters, and get pretty tanked up and make poor decisions. Either way, it’s usually a blast. But what’s a holiday season without a badass soundtrack to play in the background? The new episode of the Purple Stuff Podcast continues our tradition of offering up an eclectic selection of Christmas tunes for you.

It’s our 3rd installment of holiday tunes and it’s pretty whacked out. Matt from Dinosaur Dracula and I present more favorites from our respective playlists. To me, there’s nothing better than chilling by the Christmas tree listening to the holiday classics that you only hear during this time of year. As usual, we don’t always agree on all of these tracks, but either way, they all have their place. You’ll hear everything from a Smurfs song to a snazzy. ’60s version of “Sleigh Ride.”

Hopefully we can provide you with some new ideas to add to your annual holiday celebration…or just a bunch of songs to avoid at all costs, whatever works for you! You can subscribe to The Purple Stuff Podcast on iTunes and basically anywhere else you can get podcasts. If you want to support the show and our websites, subscribe, spread the word, or leave a review on iTunes! Thanks for reading and listening!

The Purple Stuff Podcast returns from beyond the grave! Matt from Dinosaur Dracula and I fielded your creepy questions on the show’s Twitter account @purplestuffpod and there was a resounding response! Thanks for sending them in! We had a slew of great Halloween/Horror-centric ones, but we were only able to answer a select batch of them. Hope you enjoy hearing our answers and we’d like to hear yours as well! Have a Happy Halloween and thanks for listening!

Shit is crazy, yo. That’s about the best I could come up with for an opening line.

During previous Halloween seasons, I’ve been able to ramp up the lead-up to my Halloween Specials. I loved posting a production journal on here for at least one or two of them, but it wasn’t in the cards this time. This year, even though free time is basically non-existent, I still magically whipped up a special, with the help of my friends of course! I ran into a bunch of speed bumps on the way.

A whole script basically went into the trash. I wrote this pretty epic script that, once it was too late, I realized would be entirely too much to film. Not so much about the length, but even the logistics, locations, and money. Although I love the script and it had absolutely everything in it, I came to terms with the fact that I just couldn’t pull it off so late in the game. I swore I would write the script early in the year that way it would give us extra time to film, storyboard, and even block everything out like actual filmmakers. Wrote it early I did. Threw it away late I did as well. To say I was pissed off at myself for wasting so much time and effort was an understatement. Continue reading THE SEXY ARMPIT HALLOWEEN SPECIAL 2017