So, I’ve been displaced by a hurricane (unplanned) and a trip to Maine for the fall foliage (planned). As a result, I’ve been doing a pretty awful job writing this weekly column. That said, I’m hoping for smooth sailing the rest of the way. Let’s talk football after an interesting week of games.

Option time!

Ohio State gets outmuscled by Penn State and falls to 6th…

Really? Sixth?! Give me a freaking break. This is completely contrived and designed to give the networks and writers a “top ten matchup” when Michigan plays Ohio State. Those shenanigans aside, I about died of joy watching this game. It was incredible television. Penn State is awful. They stink on ice, but they managed to beat one of the most lauded teams in football this year. They don’t have a scholarship player in any linebacker position because people are hurt! And, Urban Meyer got punched in the face by one of the wing officials and received a penalty for his trouble. Hilarious.

Georgia Tech loses the Bye Week by retaining Paul Johnson…

You need no further details.

Miami gets rolled by VPI, people sour on Richt already…

Everybody just needs to calm down. It is his first year. People were killing Golden on his recruiting. By going after Richt for losing already, some Miami fans are trying to occupy a logically impossible sphere. If Golden sucked at everything as bad as you say, then no coach should be able to be successful with his players. It’s very premature to say Richt isn’t the right guy. You need 3 recruiting cycles at minimum to get any idea. That said, Fuente seems to be settling in just fine in Blacksburg. The retention of Bud Foster was an early ‘recruiting win’ for him. Memphis was scary under Fuente, and the Hokies get far superior recruits. They looked great on offense. So great, that I wish they played Tennessee this coming weekend instead.

Colorado beats Stanford 10-5, yes…5…

The fünfer is the most illusive single digit score in football. It simultaneously commands sober awe and serves as a symbol of offensive futility. Christian McCaffrey has been done for weeks in terms of the Heisman. But, how do you not set this kid up to score? When the offense could score somehow, it was just about depriving a star athlete of the lifeblood of the award. Now, it’s about coaching incompetence. How do you not get your star involved? And, David Shaw can talk all day about the team this and the team that; but, isn’t the team going to be pissed if you don’t put them in a position to win? Asking for a friend.

Alabama obliterates TAMU, scares the children…

So, the Aggies are good, y’all. You wouldn’t know it from watching them play the Tide. But they are. Alabama embarrassed them and just routed them on both sides of the ball. Look at every metric of superiority you can find. Moving the line of scrimmage on both sides of the ball? Check. Non-offensive Touchdowns? Check. Getting to the opposing quarterback to break his internal clock? Check. I don’t say this lightly: this may be the best Alabama team Saban has ever had. And, though I hate Kiffin, he seems to be earning himself another shot at head coaching responsibilities. I’m wondering how long he stays at Bama. If he’s smart…forever.

Auburn runs Arkansas out of the stadium…

I don’t even know what to think about this. I didn’t think Auburn could score more than 50 points. I also thought Arkansas was a little better than that. But seriously, Auburn looked like it could actually compete in the Iron Bowl this year–which is unfortunate for them, because this year is not the year to play Alabama.

SMU creamed Houston, Cougs officially out of playoff consideration…

I mean, it’s not official, but it is. Houston plays in a fly-by-night conference and has mostly crappy opponents. There’s not much room to make up ground if you don’t beat the good teams. Now, they lost to one of the bad ones that they should have crushed. You can’t blame Herman, though. He just didn’t have time to scheme for SMU with all the job interviews he’s had. I have to think that someone is backing the money truck up for him in the offseason. Probably Texas.

Ole Miss didn’t play poorly in the game. But, LSU managed to hang in there longer and eventually opened up a can in the second half. The team is revitalized under Orgeron, and Fournette is back. They look ahead to Alabama and Florida. Quite frankly, if they hit .500 or better in November, Alleva needs to hire Orgeron on the spot.

There you have it. This week is Florida-Georgia and a bunch of other games. I will be people watching this year. Should be good times. Look for Bet the Board on Friday.