Friday, March 15, 2013

BSNYC Appealingly Minimalist Scandinavian Design At Bargain Prices!

Look, I'm not going to waste your time. You're busy. I'm busy. Actually, I'm not busy at all. Nevertheless, I want to get right into this quiz, because the sooner we finish with it the sooner we can all get out of our pants and into the weekend.

Maybe he’s just messing with our heads, or maybe we should keep on eye on him. He’s an obese, white male with light brown to blond hair, about 6’2″ tall. Tattoos on both arms; left arm is a crab, right arm is some kind of stylized running man the Insane Clown Posse Juggalo logo. His green backpack with a camouflage pattern looks like about an 8 liter capacity. The trucker cap says “Ontario Heating & Air.”

As I've always said, if you solve the Juggalo problem then you solve the bike theft problem, and if you don't believe there's a Juggalo problem than watch this video again, which I posted once before and which I learned about from Klaus of Cycling Inquisition:

I wonder if there are any Jewish Juggalos. I'd be shocked if there were, but you never know.

And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll know, and if you're wrong you'll see Prof. Russolo and His Noise Intoners.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and stay out of those pants until Monday.

So, I found a Cinelli 1R quill stem at my local bike coop. It uses an expander wedge to tighten the bars and looks hella clean. The bolt is stripped, but I am confident that I can tap the wedge and use a slightly bigger bolt.http://www.velobase.com/ViewComponent.aspx?ID=cd2d895c-e2ab-4947-89b8-6b53a646c8c9These things are 26.4mm clamp. Am I asking for trouble to beer can shim it to use 26.0 bars. It looks so clean and period correct.

rural 1st!Why I rode acrosst Canada by meself without begging on the internet for monies. Back then we didn't have an internet, except for Dr Strangelove. Why is it OK for mallrats wearing the groovy equivalent of squirrel suits to ask idiots to fund their vacations? Is this what happens when everyone thinks like Wesleyan graduates? Get off my lawn etc.I'm a robot.

The Armageddon is here, in the form of a faygo induced juggalo takeover. Good thing they're too obese and/or lazy to leave the street corners they post up on. prime targets for ride-by rotten-mayonnaise- balloonings. Don't worry, the most they'll do is "woop" and holler, spouting off endless streams of monosyllabic nonsense- just watch out for the sprinklings of caustic faygo spittle escaping their gaping, mouth-breather northern orifices.

2). A scranus of steel would weigh too much. A aspiring pro needs a scranus of crapon, or titanium. I'd go with titanium because, really, who would want to risk the inevitable catastrophic failure of a Crabon scranus.

3). Never seen a wild koala. That one seems to have the same general demeanor as a porcupine, minus the prickly hide.

These people are from Chesterfield! They don't know how good they have it. Stay in Chesterfield! You know, chesterfield: it's like a kind of davenport. Eat chips! Be a Chesterfield tuber! Or get off it and go out to the verandah if you need a stretch.

Just don't bother the rest of us, especially me. Tandem means TWO, ONE BEHIND THE OTHER. Four is TWO TOO MANY FOR TANDEM.

...anon @4:18pm...the word seems to be that a percentage of koalas suffer from the std chlamydia rather than gonorrhea...

...it's not so much that koalas are slutty little creatures but with the males having a bifurcated johnson (dual or split) & the females having double vaginas, the little devils have twice the opportunity to pick stuff up, ya ???...

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You do realize that riding with no helmet makes you responsible for all the ills of the world, right? I mean, it makes you worse than Hitler. Maybe Hitler-Stalin-Mussolini all on a bad hair day would equal the evils of someone who would endanger the lives of their children and their childrens' children by going head-naked. Hyperbole? Okay, maybe. But seriously, dude, you should wear a helmet. And ditch the phones. I mean, I've seen you, and your hair is not so special that it's going to suffer from a helmet that much.

"And yes, I realize Taylor Phinney has had some great results on the track, but the road is really all that matters from a career standpoint, since being a really good track racer is like being really good at bridge. Sure, it takes a lot of talent, but the only people who notice you are old people and nerds."Dude, it sounds like you're comparing a choice between being some kind of bicycle-rider and being, say, Lance Armstrong's artisnal handcrafted minimalist internal thermometer-finder (the guy who finds it after it has . . . mmmmmm . . . done its job and exited. It's cycling, for gods' sakes. Nobody in the U.S. gives a crap about ANY of it except nerds and old people. Why else do you think the mayor thinks he can solve the problem of obesity by banning sodas instead of encouraging people to move?

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About Me

While I love cycling and embrace it in all its forms, I'm also extremely critical. So I present to you my venting for your amusement and betterment. No offense meant to the critiqued. Always keep riding!