I am a Year 6 student at Kaikohe West School in Northland, NZ. I am in Room 5 and my teacher is Mr Vickerstaff.

Wednesday, 10 September 2014

PURPOSE to describe

WALT show not tell in our writing

WILF

I will begin by describing what the characters body felt like.

I will describe what they were thinking

I will leave the audience hanging

His mouth went purple like a fresh grape, his skin was turning pale. His heart was frozen, his hands were rubbing against his arms, his teeth started to clatter, he started to shiver. His hands were quivering.He was wondering where he could get warm….

12 comments:

Hi Kiri Its Kiana. I love your Writing it brings the life in to your blog. Question did you like doing and if you did why? I think what would be helpful for you would have to be changing the color of your writing. Great job so amazing. I have to go see you soon.

"Hey Kirihiria".It's Hine here first of all awesome mahi I love the way you said his mouth went purple like a fresh grape. That is a great disruption. Like what Kiana said maybe next time you could leave your colours in one writing because it is a little bit hard to read. Other than that "Ka Mau Te Wehi Mahi" Keep it up.

Thanks a lot Hine, thanks for the reminder for the colours of my writing. I think that's a great disruption as well. Can you guess what emotion/feeling I write about? If can know, why do you think that?

Roses are red violets are blue .....I am blessed to have a daughter like you..the home is the first and most effective place for children to learn the lessons of life...education honest work these will help you to become a good person....

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Hi my name is Kirihiria. I love to do origami and play on my computer. I’m looking forward to taking my chromebook home. I think you should read my blog because you can see all my successful work that I’m proud of.