Hey folks, just wanted to get this grief off my chest, since I feel I am about to go insane by keeping it in.

About a month ago, Pickles, my pet tabby cat, who I had pretty much grown up with (parents got him a few days after I was born) was diagnosed with diabetus. We were told that he would be fine by giving him the correct treatment, medication and such. He's been pretty much fine the whole summer, that is until about a week ago. I came home to him in pretty bad shape.

Took him to the vet yesterday. Said the diabetus had led to kidney failure. We would have either had to pretty much been with him the whole day and monitor him constantly, give him to a "pet hospital", or put him down. At first we chose giving him to the hospital, but I discovered today that it had become so bad, he had to be put down. It happened so abruptly, I didn't even get to say goodbye, since the decision was made at the vet and I wasn't present there since didn't think it would be this bad. But it may have been for the best, since the vet implied kidney failure can lead to severe discomfort in cats.

Needless to say, I feel like I've been hit by a train. However, even typing this out has made me feel a bit better.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. I'm still in shock, and I really had to get it off my chest.

I had to put my childhood cat down about 2 years ago. Be thankful you weren't there...

My cat started having seizures (most likely due to a brain tumor). Awful to watch her seizure. Vet put her on medication to control her seizures but it turned her into a zombie and eventually didn't stop the seizures so we had no choice to put her down.

My wife couldn't handle the thought of being there so I had to go by myself. Vet agreed there was no helping her and it was for the best. She asked if I wanted to be present and I thought I could handle it and that I should be there for her. They basically induce a heart attack with a shot and the heart shuts down. The vet warned me that it would be quick and that I would know when she took her last breath. It did happen quick and overall looked painless but her last breath haunts me today. It was so loud when she exhailed the final time that I just started crying and the vet gave me time alone with her to say goodbye. I said my goodbyes and composed myself and had to go to the counter to pay for the service but I was still tearing. I just swiped my card and ran out the door. As soon as I got outside I completely lost it but the receptionist ran out the door because I didn't sign the receipt so I had to compose myself once again.

One of the most difficult things I had to do in my 33 years of life and I'm tearing up right now even though it is 2 years later.

Moral of the story, be thankful you didn't witness it, it probably would have made it worse for you. Things get better to with time. I didn't think we would get another pet after that but we now have two more which helps heal.

So sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved kitty cat, Mechafire. I know it must be hard to even write about the loss, but if it helps,write as much as you need to. One thing I've noticed there are lots of cat lovers on the TFW boards so we can help share the pain of your loss. As for not be able to say goodbye, don't worry about that-- the best way to honor his life is by sharing the memories of good times and days gone by.