Man turns entire house into a kitchen

A man from Stoke Newington has been hailed a genius for his use of space with his revolutionary design to turn his whole house into a kitchen.
“What we wanted was a big, light, family space, for eating, food preparation and entertaining”, 45 year old Colin Dowell explained. “With urban property at a premium, I hit upon a fresh new design and have turned my whole house into a kitchen space”.
Knocking all the interior walls and floors down, he has created a vast high-ceilinged open area with patio doors onto the garden. “Now we can combine cooking, eating, entertaining, homework, piano-playing, music, sleeping and computer work all in one glorious area. Except washing and defecating,” he added “We can’t have that near food preparation so I hit on the idea of putting the bathroom outdoors”.
TV designer Kevin McCloud praised Colin’s creativity. “The house deserves an award,” he said. “So few people would be brave enough to make this move yet it really works. The outdoor toilet is a creative solution which I think will lead the way in the future of modern house design”.
Homely touches, such as the line of truffle-oil bottles on the bookshelves and the knife and fork display on the bedroom chest of drawers show how, with a bit of imagination, this design concept can look both cool and cosy.
“We’ve not actually cooked anything yet,” said Colin’s wife Michelle, “There are so many good local restaurants and coffee bars that we’ve not had a need to. But I can’t wait to use my stainless steel range and granite worktop with marble tiling!”

Bit harsh Tripe?
I thought it was a decent idea with a goodish punchline so I'm going to counter with some starrage.

Not so fanciful though. Many, many years ago in the 80s you could get a grant to make a small 1930s kitchen bigger. It was done on floor space rather than useable kitchen space. The planning officer suggested we knock through into the already opened up living/dining room which would make a massive space but only one wall useable for units and we would have to have propped the upstairs up somehow. We persuaded them to give us the grant to brick up the redundant back door and open up the walk-in pantry.