MLB – Joba Chamberlain made his highly awaited (by Yankee fan diptards) first start and it turned out to be nothing more than an extended relief appearance, as the animated (read: chest-thumping doucheface) hurler walked four and got his first career balk in 2 1/3 innings of work in a 9-3 loss to the Blue Jays…In other news relating to underperforming New York teams, Pedro Martinez returned to notch his first win of the season, allowing three runs in 6 innings of nothing to do with midgets and cockfighting. Boooo… Randy Johnson passes Roger Clemens to become 2nd on the all-time strikeout list, then cinches up his career loss total, giving up a homer to Ryan Braun en route to his second loss of the season…Erik Bedard continues his torrid campaign of highly compensated mediocrity for the Mariners as Joe Saunders get his AL-leading 9th win in an Angels 5-4 victory.

Women's College World Series – Arizona State beat Texas A&M to claim the national championship in a 11-0 nailbiter. I believe another undie run is in order.

French Open – Birfday boy Rafael Nadal and Novak Djokovic to meet in the semifinals, then once there, possibly play a match against one another. Ana Ivanovic to meet me in a fantasy rooftop restaurant where the dessert menu all comes served on her tits. Yeah, I need that to be interested in tennis.

I would love to fuck the ASU softball team…Now, when I say that, I mean the whole ladies Softball team…

06.04.08 at 9:48 am

rv

what the fuck kind of retard name is joba anyway? eh who cares fuck the city of new york.

06.04.08 at 9:57 am

swanychitown

JobaLLLLLLLLL? Seems more fitting, no?

06.04.08 at 9:59 am

King Jeremy the Wicked

seems to be pretty appropriate considering the retarded pitching performance put on display last night. what really warms my heart is that is the best the Spankmes can put out there. They have been going on and on about this for weeks and he goes out there and tanks. Ha ha….screw you Steinbrenners. Guess 200 mill doesnt buy what it used to.

06.04.08 at 10:01 am

Allan Stokke

Joba: Because apparently changing your name because of the way your retarded niece pronounces "Justin" is the coolest.

06.04.08 at 10:01 am

swanychitown

UFF THESE FUCKING ADDS WILL BE THE END OF ME! SILENCE IS GOLDEN (besides the subtle smacking in my pants)

06.04.08 at 10:11 am

Jim Jones

Joba the Hutt.

lol fatboy

06.04.08 at 10:16 am

TP2151

I am a life long Yankee fan and even I HATE THIS TEAM!!

06.04.08 at 10:51 am

Enrico Pallazzo

Take it easy on Joba, fellas, he threw a one-hitter!

06.04.08 at 10:54 am

TiffanyLeigh

Who ever thought that Jobs'd be nostalgic for four fewer outs and a Cleveland locust swarm?

Tiny upside: the NY sports beat has stopped flogging their logs to printing the "Joba Rules" like he's a motivational speaker for the Learning Annex.

06.04.08 at 11:49 am

Bob Loblaw

Good thing the Yankees didn't give up this guy, or Philip Hughes, or Ian Kennedy for Johan Santana.

06.04.08 at 12:23 pm

PitchItToBarryBonds

ha ha ha go jays go!

06.04.08 at 1:42 pm

LeapinLizards

I left Joba on my bench in my fantasy league by accident and now I look like a freaking genius….oo-OOOO!