Cree taps into the desolation that comes with spending most of your life under office light, which has a special way of making everything look aggressively bland: an atmosphere that first suppresses you before driving you to violent insanity.

To a melancholy melody, casualties of cogdom are depicted in a languishing state, broken by words whose candidness, whose charm, coincide perfectly with an uplifting chorus: "There's so much beauty in the world. Just not in your office."

Mix the charm of The Elves and the Shoemaker with the Napoleonic Lilliputians of Gulliver's Travels and you've got "Kitchen," the print piece by JWT/NY for Johnson & Johnson's Visine.

The visual relates a myth about how all those tears get inside a wee bottle of Visine. Look closely: tireless miniature men conduct tear-gathering work around the frozen face and body of a glassy-eyed woman of normal size. Cut onions litter the table before her; elsewhere, tiny labourers bear buckets. One leans over a giant funnel and pours the harvested fluid into a Visine container.

Ozzy Osbourne appears in his third (or fourth?) Samsung spot, this time for the Alias 2.

The aforementioned handheld boasts snazzy E-Ink technology that enables the keyboard to right itself no matter which way you're holding the phone: sideways or upright. It's pretty cool actually. But Ozzy freaks, starts murmuring "Samsung voodoo," lifts up his cross and leaves.

Soon after, a scientist attempting to pursue him and explain the technology is Tased for a really, really, really long time.

Jurassic 5's Chali 2Na brings narrative weight and a forceful, poetic pace to "The Inner Workings of a Creator," a deconstruction of NBA Rookie of the Year Derrick Rose.

Rose is frozen in space. Sections of his body are highlighted and zoomed as 2Na describes what makes the wunderkind tick: yo-yo magic, and a Peregrine falcon, among other things. (Seriously though? Falcons don't eff around. See one take a deer.)

Note how Rose's high-top sneaks are targeted twice.* That's because this piece is for Adidas' "Impossible is Nothing" campaign, a nice transition from the Beijing Olympics subset, which was equally epic and also animated, albeit to a totally different tune.

But Samsung must've been sick when that memo went out -- it's still stuck on that low-budget "Is it real? Can't be!" crap.

In its latest online effort, "Awesome computer comes to life," a woman at a trade show stops by the booth for Samsung's new mini-Notebook, the N310. Two Notebooks, side by side, boast the two lamest faux features imaginable: some kind of hologram effect, and the ability to give life to mischievous putty people.

The other day we came across this supersized contact lens ad on MySpace. The banner lets users swap the eye colours of the featured model, and even change the model herself. Choose from ethnically unambiguous options like Gabriela (at left), Jada and Kate.

You can also upload a picture of yourself, the better to gauge how to improve on nature with pupil shades in Sterling Gray, Brilliant Blue and Gemstone Green.

We were all, "Ooh! Engagement features!" -- a trite enough inclusion, but certainly worth a few minutes' distraction. Hopefully one day we'll be able to customize our children this way.

And that's all Intel has to say about that. Oh, and as an addendum: "Our rock stars aren't like your rock stars" -- which is also the name of this campaign, which we so far think is fantastic, because we're members of the Revenge of the Nerds! techieverse.

ArnoldNYC partnered with Stardust Studios to develop "A State of Mouth," a bizarre :15 spot in which a friendly-enough-looking guy pops an icebreaker into his mouth and turns into some psychedelic spaghetti-headed Picasso thing.

The last frame is especially WTFtastic -- dude appears to be crying icicles.

We do not understand. It was neat watching the animation eat his face though. That's some seriously magic clown makeup.

In the spot, Ozzy makes almost-funny jokes about how the phone is more attuned to his needs than previous human assistants, which respectively had hearing problems (for obvious reasons) and kept odd hours (the daytime ones).

It is surprisingly not horrible. But in the event that brands race out right now with a mad hankering to book a seat on the Ozzy train, we're at pains to remind you he's got a full docket: World of Warcraft'salready aboard, plus Samsung's planning still more spots.

The one-time dauphin-of-Darkness must be a helluva prince to work with.