Market Research: Americans Like Hemorrhoids, Hipsters More than Congress

Don’t take this the wrong way, but we always assumed that public polling would be a fairly tedious practice. Not so for today’s excellentPublic Policy Polling experiment, in which pollsters got to ask generic Americans whether they liked the current Congress more than some of the world’s most awful things. Here is a partial list of the objects, people, actions or concepts deemed more popular than our august representative body (full list here):

Dog poop

Toe fungus

Witches

Cockroaches

Your mother-in-law

And some of those that polled lower than congress:

Charles Manson

Heroin

Ebola

Vladimir Putin

Miley Cyrus

What did heroin ever do to anybody?

The demographic voicing the strongest support for congress was “very conservative” voters, 15% of whom say the organization is doing a decent job. Based on some other, seemingly related polls, we feel like they may have misunderstood the question.

Also, PPP deserves a big hat tip for writing our headlines so we don’t have to.