After Bart wrecks the dryer, Marge tries to sell her Johnny Reb figurine...until a kitschy antique store owner named John reveals that the figurine is a flask. Soon, the family befriends John...until Homer freaks out when Marge tells Homer that John is a homosexual. Worried that Bart may emulate John instead of his own father, Homer takes Bart on a journey to become manly.

Recap

Couch: The living room is on an "America Onlink" computer screen. An unseen user tries to download the family members, but the download takes too long and shows no signs of progress. After a few seconds, the user tries to click the exit button on the screen. Nothing happens.

According to the DVD commentary, this episode was almost banned due to its (then) controversial content about homophobia and tolerance for gay people. It wasn't until a new FOX executive producer was brought in that the episode could air (provided that a few content changes be done to appease the censors).

Episode Quotes

(After meeting John, Homer is worried that Bart is gay. He places Bart in front of a billboard with scantily clad women on it.) Bart: What am I supposed to do here?Homer: Nothing. Just sit. I'll be back.(Homer walks away, revealing the "Laramie Slims" billboard.)Homer: Well, it's been two hours. How do you feel?Bart: I dunno. I kinda want a cigarette.Homer: That's a good start. Let's get you a pack. What's your brand?Bart: Anything slim!Homer:(Grunts) Okay, that didn't work.

(Marge wakes up because she hears Homer making strange noises. She turns on the light.)Marge: Homie, I can hear you chewing on your pillow. What's wrong?Homer: Marge, the boy was wearing a Hawaiian shirt!Marge: So?Homer: There's only two kinds of guys that wear those shirts, gay guys and big fat party animals. And Bart doesn't look like a big fat party animal to me.

Marge: Didn't John seem a little...festive to you?Homer: Couldn't agree more, happy as a clam.Marge: He prefers the company of men!Homer: Who doesn't!Marge: Homer...listen carefully. John is a Ho-mo--Homer: Right.Marge: --Sexual! (Homer screams)