News of the worst

By Otis Gardner

Published: Saturday, September 7, 2013 at 10:19 AM.

This guy was responsible for what was labeled “workplace violence,” which we all know to be political nonsense. The administration made it “workplace” because they couldn’t have domestic Islamic terrorism happening on the president’s watch, damaging his image. “Watch” is an overly charitable use of the term since about all he watches are polls.

There was some very bad news that will get worse. Obama threw down a “you better not do it” gauntlet by drawing a line in the sand with his magic talking stick, the same one he twice rode into the White House.

What could go wrong? Well, Assad crossed the line, thereby asking, “now what?” The answer to which is being debated as I type this.

Obama looked around for backup and found none so he’s asking for help. The irony is he’s distrusted by the very people he now needs for support. Karma?

Truth be told,
America
can’t leave him twisting in the wind. He is “my” president although he doesn’t like me along with about half the country one little bit. But that’s a fair exchange. I can’t stand him either.

Too bad we can’t time-travel back a couple of weeks. When Assad’s gassing was first confirmed we should’ve torn a page from Roger Rabbit’s sex-education manual. “It won’t hurt…did it?”

Obama should’ve been quick and decisive before Assad mixed weapons with civilians, making surgical strikes all but impossible. Not only did Obama freeze in the headlights, he dithered about our intentions and plans, broadcasting what we would do and not do.

Since my sentiment was so devoid of empathy, I re-thought it. After considering what he’d done and the cost of keeping him fed and watered for decades, I expanded my initial kneejerk reaction to, “very, very sweet!”

That wasn’t the only good news rolling through. A small tidbit reported Nidal Hasan had his beard forcibly taken off which is apparently a big deal to Islamic nutcases like him.

Good. The only thing that could’ve made that news better to me was if they had let his victims’ families do it. I’ve heard some of them have relatives in Brazil and folks down there know a little something about hair removal.

This guy was responsible for what was labeled “workplace violence,” which we all know to be political nonsense. The administration made it “workplace” because they couldn’t have domestic Islamic terrorism happening on the president’s watch, damaging his image. “Watch” is an overly charitable use of the term since about all he watches are polls.

There was some very bad news that will get worse. Obama threw down a “you better not do it” gauntlet by drawing a line in the sand with his magic talking stick, the same one he twice rode into the White House.

What could go wrong? Well, Assad crossed the line, thereby asking, “now what?” The answer to which is being debated as I type this.

Obama looked around for backup and found none so he’s asking for help. The irony is he’s distrusted by the very people he now needs for support. Karma?

Truth be told, America can’t leave him twisting in the wind. He is “my” president although he doesn’t like me along with about half the country one little bit. But that’s a fair exchange. I can’t stand him either.

Too bad we can’t time-travel back a couple of weeks. When Assad’s gassing was first confirmed we should’ve torn a page from Roger Rabbit’s sex-education manual. “It won’t hurt…did it?”

Obama should’ve been quick and decisive before Assad mixed weapons with civilians, making surgical strikes all but impossible. Not only did Obama freeze in the headlights, he dithered about our intentions and plans, broadcasting what we would do and not do.

Obama’s incompetency has painted us into a box. If we strike we’ll kill a bunch of civilians by Assad’s design. If we don’t strike we’ll kill most of what’s left of any credibility America has in that region.

It’s too bad Obama can’t inflict as much sustained cultural and economic destruction upon Syria as he has this country. That’d definitely teach Assad an unforgettable lesson.

Over the past five years he’s been teaching us the same lesson. I surely won’t ever forget this presidency.

Otis Gardner’s column appears weekly. He can be reached at ogardner@embarqmail.com