August 17, 2006

The Style section in today's NYT is full of frightening stories, almost like it's a special spoof edition.

First, we see that the new look for fall is lots of thick, floppy, frumpy, grayish layers. And don't you know it's all a struggle "between clothes that truly attempt to reflect cultural diversity and those that submit to the aesthetic of money"?

Then, we see that eyebrows should be thick and bushy and actively mussed up with clear mascara so they stick up "like plumage" and give the face "a wild expression ... described as 'sauvage.'" But if you don't do it just so, you'll look like Groucho Marx.... a risk you're going to have to take.

The shoes in question are black, bulky and baffling. They have high wedges or cumbersome platforms. Some take the form of demiboots. One pair of leather and suede ankle boots from Balenciaga comes with a harness, a sole thick enough to look like an encyclopedia and a pointy upturned toe, which leaves the top of the shoe looking like a basin....

If the current style has anything to say about sex, it is the suggestion that women suddenly possess little or no enthusiasm for it. Instead the shoes convey the tensions of combative times, said Suzanne Ferris, co-editor of “Footnotes,’’ a scholarly anthology on the meaning of shoes. “This sense of war and fighting and the need to be tougher seems evident,’’ she said.

The unusual stupidity of these styles makes it easier than usual to imagine the articles a year from now that will tell us why no one wants to wear that anymore. Or maybe it will take two years to grow out of this stuff. Since it's Bush's fault, we may need to torture you with this stuff until a Democrat is moved into the White House.

45 comments:

Ann,Have you read the terrorist bill of rights ruling? She is also giving attorney client privilege to foreign terrorists.

For example, scholars and journalists such as plaintiffs Tara McKelvey, Larry Diamond, and Barnett Rubin indicate that they must conduct extensive research in the Middle East, Africa, and Asia, and must communicate with individuals abroad whom the United States government believes to be terrorist suspects or to be associated with terrorist organizations. 12 In addition, attorneys Nancy Hollander, William Swor, Joshua Dratel, Mohammed Abdrabboh, and Nabih Ayad indicate that they must also communicate with individuals abroad whom the United States government believes to be terrorist suspects or to be associated with terrorist organizations, 13 and must discuss confidential information over the phone and email with their international clients. 14

Fashion is an art form, of course; but it still needs to be wearable. It's discouraging to see so many designers either disregarding the female body altogether, making it into something it isn't, or punishing it somehow. That's the nice thing about visual arts (I'm thinking of Renaissance painting)--the artists actually appreciate the genuine beauty of the human body.

This is sexist, but I'm also leery of men who design women's clothes. It's like going to a male GYN; I'm sure he's perfectly competent, but there are some things he simply doesn't get.

I got the Victoria's Secret fall clothing catalog last week and flipped through it, thinking "Well, clothes have turned ugly again." Seriously, who but the most painfully thin look good in cigarette pants? The big top, skinny leg look (not seen in the NYT article, but seen a lot elsewhere) was hideous in the 80s and it's hideous now. All those layers of cloth and the swathing and wrapping make me think that the designers are finally ashamed of their models' bodies -- or that they're catering to the segment of the population that believes clothing is meant to hide our bodies, not complement them. Ick.

Joan: The skinny pants are bad, but the low-rise pants are the WORST. Maybe three people in the whole world look good in them. So why is it almost impossible to find jeans, or dress pants, that don't ride down around your bottom, or show off your underwear when you sit down?

I especially enjoyed the frumpy sweater with the giant belt just over the ribs with another frumpy sweater layered on top. And the shoes they showed were just hideous. Everything looks like it was designed by people who hate women.

The eyebrow thing--woohoo! I wouldn't mind if that became popular. I have caterpillars resting over my eyes if I forego the trimming and tweezing.

Clothes have been getting uglier and uglier over the last several years. I received an Anthropologie fall catalogue the other day (it is admittedly a very trendy brand, but usually has nice, feminine clothes in good taste), and it is chock-full of hideous styles.

I think the shoe styles they are pushing this fall... well, hideous is the only word for it. It's like, if you want me to wear heels, at least make them pretty. High heels that are also ugly???? insult to injury!

I have to disagree! Vehemently and utterly disagree: the retro eighties look is such a relief after the thong-Britney-uber-flared-pointy-toe-butterflyshirt look of the early 2000s (is that the right?) Remember how trashy the muffin top looked?

The girls here in Boston look so elegant compared to the Brittany jeans era: slim fitting preppy shirt dresses over cropped black leggings. Oversized black sunglasses. Gorgeous bags hung in the crook of your elbow, out front. Dark nails. Shapely, but not overplucked, eyebrows. Belts. Buckles. Strands of pearls. Belts and flats and hats and accessories! When nineties minimalism comes back these girls will be sad. No more bangles? Oh, I love the fitted, piled on look of right now. The girls here do it well and I'm inspired, in my late thirties-ness, to shop again. How lovely.

I don't know about puffing the eyebrows up, but hooray for putting down the tweasers. Some women completely destroy their faces with crazy thin eyebrows. How about that chef lady from last season's Top Chef. Didn't that drive anyone else insane?

The last time I had my eyebrows shaped three of the four chairs were occupied by young men. Thought I'd walked into the wrong spa. Though I had the caterpillar look the overplucked unnatural half circle arch is as equally hideous.

As for thick frumpy clothing, the slimming clothes I buy end up making me look this way anyway. Now I'll be sweating in wool at the same time....always an attractive look.

'But if you don't do it just so, you'll look like Groucho Marx.... a risk you're going to have to take.' Hilarious!

The inane contortions of women's fashion proves the wisdom behind the ancient Jewish prayer, traditionally recited by men daily thanking God that they were not born as women.

Ann says "Blame Bush" for the "muscle shoes" that seem to be this fall's offering. Why not, since he is already being blamed for the weather, Islamofascism, and just about everything in between.

Perhaps that also explains why Bush and Repubs generally do better with men than women. Men don't have to "Blame Bush" for changing shoe styles or imposing on them other unwearable stuff. Like most men, I don't need to worry about changing shoe styles -- I've been buying the same black cap-toe shoe for decades. As for business attire, the choice is between blue or grey, preferably both dark, while you get to choose whether to have a stripe or cuffs. And for an added bonus, decent men's clothes are standardized -- one maker's size 42 reg fits pretty much just like another's -- and are well made.

It may well be that the "new look for fall is lots of thick, floppy, frumpy, grayish layers." But that's only for women. Thank God.

Truly, it occurs to me that there is a whole generation of young women out there, with another on the way, who have no sense of what it feels like to have their pants actually cover their asscrack. (I feel crass. Sorry, is there a polite term for that?)

The pictures linked to are pretty atrocious but the on-the-street versions are flattering to a variety of female body types (if you know what to wear and what not to wear), and as Maxine Weiss stated, cover a variety of sins. With the longer layered look, rear-cleavage is a thing of the past.

As for eyebrow shaping, good old Indian threading is the best for a 'natural' brow.

*I cannot believe I am so invested in this discussion. I guess this is just an interesting fashion moment and I'm glad to see the back of, uh, the back-cleavage styles....

Elizabeth, I remember hearing "Friends" had really caused them to be the rage... of course, it was Courtney Cox and Jennifer Aniston--both teeny, tiny skinny women with giant chests--who wore them on the show. Hey, more power to em, but only about .001% of the female population fits that demographic, and we got stuck with them for like a decade!

I think the shoes have a much greater influence from the strip club than the military. There is no such thing as a platform combat boot. In fact anyone who has worn combat boots knows that they have thin soles to provide flexibility. However, anyone who has been in a strip club (admittedly I was not always as mature as I am now) knows that you can't swing a dead cat in a strip club without hitting a pair of platform shoes.

It is not that surprising to see strip-club influenced clothes given the general acceptability of strip clubs and porn in pop-culture. Sad but true,

Any way not Bush's fault, not the war's fault - simply a symptom of pop-cultures little perversion.