Thoughts On Finding Purpose

14. January 2019

Clearing by Martha Postlewaite

Do not try to savethe whole worldor do anything grandiose.Instead, createa clearingin the dense forestof your lifeand wait therepatiently,until the songthat is your lifefalls into your own cupped handsand you recognize and greet it.Only then will you knowhow to give yourselfto this worldso worthy of rescue.

This last one, the P word was a daunting task to say the least. I’ve been ignoring it for years, keeping myself busy with the activities at hand – study, work, side projects, getting on with life. It was only recently that I slowed down, took a deep breath and I finally listened to the nagging voice: What are you doing? Where is it all leading to? What’s your purpose?

I didn’t have an answer. What’s the big, grandiose life purpose? It was vague and confusing. Isn’t this something for visionaries?

Enter Jake Desyllas, host of the Voluntary Life podcast. In his recent Your Purpose in Life Can Change episode (16min), Jake brought the much needed clarity to the subject. Stop reading, go and listen to his podcast right now (also available on Youtube). I am going to outline the points I resonate with here.

My idea of a BIG LIFE purpose

That’s how I used to look at purpose: A big, meaningful mission I’m given for my lifetime. I need to find it and achieve it. A nirvana state where I have a single focus. Working towards it brings fulfillment and joy, I feel like I belong to a ‘bigger purpose’. It’s dynamic but it’s peaceful and still at the same time. The unimportant fades away, I only use my energy on what matters to me.

The word purpose is a combination of “forth” and “put, place”. In other words “to put forth, to design, to intend“. There’s much more dynamic than I thought. It’s not something given, it’s something I decide to put forward in motion. It then becomes an aim, intention, goal and I go for it.

So my purpose is entirely self initiated. Phew … what a relief !

By the way, maybe this blog is a vehicle for finding purpose or it’s my current purpose itself? I set it up to keep my eyes on a self-defined goal. Hm … It all makes sense now.

Jake’s view on finding purpose:

Being on a mission, having an overwhelmingly important project. One that you go all in on in your commitment. Everything else in your life has to revolve around that project or commitment. …

It’s not easy, it’s a big and ambitious goal. But having a purpose in life means being driven, having massive enthusiasm and passion for something, and internal motivation to do something.

I don’t see a purpose in life as being something that has to be about achieving something external and flashy. It can be a very personal goal to do with your relationships and building your family for example.

One big purpose or a series of purposes

I don’t know where I got this idea from – that the purpose is only one and there’s a way to get it wrong. It’s quite the opposite. The same way as I create a purpose, I can create another one, or slightly adapt it (that’s what happened to my FI goal). Inspect and adapt – that’s the name of the game.

In the podcast, Jake shares the series of purposes during the course of his life: growing a business, reaching FI, self-development, being the best possible partner to his wife and father to his daughter.

Life is healthier, richer and more varied and diverse if you have different missions you dedicate yourself to rather than just one.

It ain’t gonna always be fun

Now – about the common misconception that once you know my purpose, it will be all smooth sailing from here.

Think about your purpose as having a massively important project in your life. Something that you dedicate yourself to. That means often you have to exclude other things of your life. It’s not peaceful and easy, you’re not blissful and content. It can be quite stressful, challenging and emotionally draining. It’s not necessarily fun on a day to day basis.

Learn to say No

My best skill when pursuing your purpose is the ability to say No. I’ll have to say NO to many things. If I am focused on something in my life, this means I have to exclude a lot of other potentially interesting opportunities. I’m not available to just go with the flow on anything that comes up because I’m on a mission. I’ve got a purpose. I’m trying to do something.

Driven people tend to focus on something to the exclusion of other things in their life. If you identify a purpose in life, it doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be super balanced.

Actually, it can mean you know what you’re trying to do more clearly and therefore you have to say no to a lot of stuff all the time because you’re moving towards your purpose.

Conclusion

I hope that some of these thoughts can be helpful for you in taking some of the pressure off about finding purpose in life. It has been a long struggle and a lot of thinking has gone into it. But here is the good news:

You don’t have to find it once. Why not have a purpose in life now that might not be the same purpose in your life 10years from now?

Why not take the pressure off and choose something you can feel massively enthusiastic about and get really, really committed to now? And then have a different phase in life later.

Comments

In the end money is only a tool to live a better life and do something meaningful. Yet we don’t talk much about purpose and fullfillment in the FI movement. We tend to focus solely on money. How to make more, how to spend less, etc. We almost forget about life!
It’s great to see someone writing about this topic!

Jake Desyllas’s podcast has inspired me too. And I now think of things bigger than myself.
The same way we optimize our finances, I think we can find ways to optimize (or improve the chances of) fulfilment.

And I have found that for me meaning comes from helping others. It seems quite obvious now but doing good makes me happy. So the next question is how to optimize doing good?

How can I do the most good?
Financial Independence is such a powerful tool to enable poeple to do what they want. Including doing good, on a large scale. So that’s where I am.

Thanks again for your post! And all the best in your qu’est for meaning!

Thanks, Sebastien!
Doing good is a very subjective and personal thing. One can enjoy hands-on work to benefit communities, donating money and leveraging the effective altruism principles, being there for their close family, focus on self-development which then indirectly affects the community.

There are thousands of ways of doing good, and that’s where creativity and experimentation come into play.

The FI is just a tool to support you while you experiment.
It’s like in a computer game – you first develop your tools and resources and then go out and play!

Welcome

Hi, I am Katerina Apostolova (Kate App)
* My simple formula for reaching Financial Independence: Spend less than you earn and invest the difference
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You win extra points if you find what you love doing in the process

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