06/25/2012

Eyes Wide Open

I had a bit of a revelation today.

I usually get dressed in the cubicle after a shower at the gym.It's not that I'm prudish - in fact I change from my work to workout clothes in the change rooms every evening without a care, boobs and all. It's more a matter of still having a few hang ups about my body that will probably always stand in the way of letting me be that girl who strolls around the change room buck nekkid after ther shower.I find comfort in fabric, even if it is only covering the essentials.

After a morning workout however, I am aware of the line for the showers (aware because I, like many, have had to wait in said line) so this morning I chucked on my undies and cami and wandered out to do my hair and get dressed outside.And as I was faced with the mirror, I looked up and I saw this...Alright, lets be honest, maybe not quite that (and certainly not clear plastic porn star heels) but it may as well have been with how impressed I was!Poking out from the bottom of my cami were two skinny little size 8 legs.Now that should make sense, given that the last pair of jeans I bought were, in fact, a size 8, but in my head my legs, up until about 7:25 this morning, just haven't been that small.None of me has!

I did a little twist and turned around slowly around to examine what I was seeing in the mirror. The girls waiting nearby for the showers must have thought I was either thoroughly vain or slightly crazy, but I just couldn't stop looking in disbeleif.Of course they are still far from perfect, and are yet to be sculpted and toned like those beauties up there, but my legs were, and dare I say it, ARE thin.In fact when I really looked, I could see that most of me is.

It's taken SUCH a long time for my body to catch up to my head,. The size on the tags of any new clothing I buy has been ever decreasing, and each time I have celebrated it and been excited to share it with my friends. The scales have been smiling back at me with smaller numbers every week, and every week my 12WBT friends and I have patted each other on the back and congratulated each other on a job well done. Of course, we've deserved to!But when I looked in the mirror, when I looked at my before and after photos, I haven't seen the big differences, the dropped dress sizes, the 20kg gone.Not really.

I know logically that the change is there, I've just had my blinders on.So I'm a bit excited by what I saw this morning, what I finally realised had happened.I have always felt like by knowing I was getting fitter, I could take on the world, so imagine what I can do now by knowing (actually not just knowing, but truly realising) what it is capable of doing to my body, and as an extension, my mind!Wise words indeed.It's time for some world changing!xxxSJ