Suicide Grief Support Forum

The Suicide Grief Support Forum is a public message board, an outreach project of the Parents of Suicides (POS) and Friends and Families of Suicides (FFOS) Internet Communities. The forum officially began on October 2, 2002.

Our mission is to provide information, support and comfort to anyone whose life has been touched by the suicide of another person. Connecting with others who have walked the same road can sometimes make a difference in how we survive a tragedy that may be incomprehensible.

The board is monitored by special volunteers who give freely of their time in memory of the people they lost to suicide.

We do not pretend to be professionals, and we encourage anyone whose needs are greater than can be met here to seek out professional help.

I was always trying to find some kind of hobby that would keep my interest and when I started knitting I fell in love. And my biggest fan was my husband. Everything I made, good or bad, Marc would say it was beautiful. He was even my model when I would finish a project and was always glad to do it. He would crack me up and I would always tell him I was going to take pics and send them to the guys at work. He would just laugh and say, "The things I do for love." Just remembering his words with his beautiful smile just brings me to tears. After what whathappened I just couldn't bring myself to knit. I finally started again. It took awhile to get me going again. What's weird is that I feel comfort in it while working on a project like he is there with me just like he was all those times before. But when I am close to finishing is when my sadness emerges. He is not there to see what I have accomplished and to lovingly model for his wife. Also, a month before he passed away he asked me to knit his mom a dishcloth. To this day I have not completed it. Crazy as it may sound I feel that if I do I have completed his one last request of me. Knowing this I have left it undone and it makes me feel that it's not over. It's like reading a book and getting to the final chapter. Once read, a book is finished. I just can'tand don't want it to end.

Mkm0272, the thing I think of is that even if you finish a book and come back to read it again at another time, the story is similar but it can still change because your perception of things has changed. So in a sense you could start to knit Marc's mother something else instead, then you would have something to work on and to share with her along with this great memory.

July 1986 - Oct 2011. Whispering nightly. "Rebecca, I love you. I forgive you. I miss you. I will hold you again."