Monday, April 15, 2013

When
I was a boy, I used to have a reoccurring dream that I was stuck to
train tracks by some unknown force... My legs were lead, and struggle as
I may to free myself, I couldn't move... It was a helpless feeling.

Today, my battle is more than just a dream... when I am in Parkinson's strongest grip, my childhood dream becomes a reality, and my legs REALLY ARE LEAD... and, I'm REALLY FROZEN IN PLACE... my emotional steam can build
so quickly... and, depending on the pressure of the moment, well, I'll freak out...

In the middle of the night, I often listen to the book of Romans. Chapter 7:18b, defines my struggle...

"For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing."

As
frustrating as this battle for doing the right thing is, I commit to never giving
up... and, as I fail again and again... to ask for God's forgiveness, for he is my hope...

"Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it... What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans7:20-25)

CT. Studd (1860-1931)

Charles Thomas Studdwas an English missionary who faithfully served His Savior in China,
India, and Africa.His motto was: "If Jesus Christ is God and died for
me, then no sacrifice can be too great for me to make for Him."

ONLY ONE LIFE, 'TWILL SOON BE PAST​“Two little lines I heard one day,

Traveling along life’s busy way;

Bringing conviction to my heart,

And from my mind would not depart,

Only one life, ’twill soon be past,

Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one,
Soon will its fleeting hours be done;

Then, in ‘that day’ my Lord to meet,

And stand before His Judgement seat;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, the still small voice,
Gently pleads for a better choice
Bidding me selfish aims to leave,
And to God’s holy will to cleave;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, a few brief years,
Each with its burdens, hopes, and fears;
Each with its clays I must fulfill,
living for self or in His will;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

When this bright world would tempt me sore,
When Satan would a victory score;
When self would seek to have its way,
Then help me Lord with joy to say;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Give me Father, a purpose deep,
In joy or sorrow Thy word to keep;
Faithful and true what e’er the strife,
Pleasing Thee in my daily life;
Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Oh let my love with fervor burn,
And from the world now let me turn;
Living for Thee, and Thee alone,
Bringing Thee pleasure on Thy throne;
Only one life, “twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, yes only one,
Now let me say,”Thy will be done”;
And when at last I’ll hear the call,
I know I’ll say “twas worth it all”;
Only one life,’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.

Only one life, ’twill soon be past,
Only what’s done for Christ will last.
And when I am dying, how happy I’ll be,
If the lamp of my life has been burned out for Thee.”

mervin allen best!!such a blessing you are to us all.As I watch you, I see the humility of Jesus.God gives grace to the humble so I trust youare receiving generous helpings of grace! That being said,even with grace, I know your suffering is severe. Always grateful for you,molly