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As the title says with April coming up I've hit a crossroads in my life right now.

With April coming up, jobs are going to be a lot more available, but I've spent the entire winter really focusing on what I truly want out of life because to be honest over the last 5 months I've had too much free time.

Within the next two to three weeks I'll know for sure if its worth for me to try to find work back home or if its probably best for me to work out west for another couple of years. The worse thing about being unemployed especially with having this sleeping disorder is that its put me into a little bit of a debt. Its pretty much drained about 60% of our savings that I spent so long building up a comfortable nest egg. I guess looking back on it, it was great I took the initiative to build up a nest egg for myself.

I guess the biggest challenge that exists for me is pretty much starting at square one. I spent 4 years building up a good positive reputation with one company only to get burned by it in the end. The biggest thing in my life that I realized is that I've been going about the career the wrong way ever since I went to university. I was never really focused on doing something that I love, to me when I got my environmental studies degree back in 2003 I had an interest in the environment but I realize it was something that I was not passionate about. The main reason why I did an environmental degree is because I felt it was the degree that gave me the best prospects for finding work as soon as I graduated. I went to university only focused on finding a job as soon as possible without even considering or thinking for a moment what I am truly passionate about with regards to building a career. When I was working out in Alberta I wasn't really enjoying my job but I was content because I managed to buy a home, get some of the major bills paid off, buy some furniture, and just last year I managed to get my student loan completely paid off. I think to get a 24,000 student loan paid off in 6 years was quite a big accomplishment for me.

I truly thought I would not have to force myself to go away again to make sure that everything was looked after with regards to being back home. There are reasons on both sides of why I should back to Alberta and work or why I should stay home and try to work out something here. One thing that I do plan on doing is that I'll be going back to school to do something that I am passionate about. The only problem is that I do not plan on getting another student loan to help with schooling this time around. So basically the plan is I'm going to work for another 3 to 5 years until I have another nest egg built up, and the rest of debts paid off.

What I plan to be doing in school, is something my fellow co-workers recommend to me. They told me that while I may be a good devoted work when it came to field environment work, but I was always devoted towards safety, finding safer ways of doing the job, doing everybody's FLRA's (Field Level Risk Assessments), things along those lines. When I go back to school I'll be doing a diploma for Occupational Health and Safety. I know with a lot of construction projects hitting in this province within the next couple of years, they'll be needing a lot of people like that.

I guess whats really aggravating most of all, is I've been putting out a lot of resumes in the last few weeks to both Alberta and Newfoundland and I have not heard a single thing. I still got my EI to cover me until the end of October, but the problem is I can't take any kind of minimum wage job either. In order to make all my bill payments in terms of the power, mortgage, car payment, I need at the absolute minimum $14.00 an hour. Which can be really tough to get in this province, with regards to Alberta its easy to get at a minimum $20.00 an hour. One plus that comes with going back to Alberta, is currently we have two vehicles. If i do move away we'll really only need one vehicle and my in-laws have offered to buy our older vehicle which is currently 6 years old for about 2000 to 2500, thankfully that amount will be enough to get me out of debt, so the only immediate debt I'll have to worry about is to pay money back to my parents.

To be honest I'm not really thrilled about the possibility of moving back out west. Anyone knows how hard working out there was on my system especially with working the long shifts, not getting very many days off and things along those lines. What is making me worry is that I've sent about a dozen resumes off to Alberta but I have not heard anything back from any of the company's I've applied for. I don't even have to go back to Alberta, I'd be content taking work in Saskatchewan, Manitoba anywhere where I can get some additional experience since being terminated I have to start over again.

If your looking for an update regarding the human rights case. The company did provide an unapologetic response of why they got rid of me and they were justified in doing so even though they said there may be medical records of my sleeping disorder even though they said it was in storage and weren't interested in looking for it. I had a chance to write a counter-response to their response letter and right now there is nothing more either side can do. Each side has told their story, and now its up to the commission to make their decision. Unfortunately the commission only meets once every two to three months so it could be anywhere from 6 months to a year before i finally hear the outcome of this case.

For the moment, its just a waiting game right now. I'm sending 6 resumes a week, hopefully one of them will drum up enough interest to get a response, but irregardless even if I don't get a response out west by the end of April I'll be gone back out anyway. If I can't find any environmental work or geo-technical work, I don't mind doing janitorial work because I can make good money doing that kind of work much better that the majority of the jobs I would work at back home. Until then its just the never-ending waiting game.

I'm still bummed out about not making it to the meet, but skills is always optimistic that all the wrongs in my life will work out and the potential of me making it to the meet still exists. I swear to god, if some miracle happens and I can make it to the meet, skills I owe you a favor.

That is pretty much whats been happenign with my life lately, so anyway guys take care.