Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Vacation, Day 4

It's hard to believe that today is Day 4 of our Vacation. I'd like to think that Day 1 didn't really count. We mostly just travelled, waking up at 4:30 am EST, then flying, driving, and arriving at our destination around dinner time, Central Time. And Day 2 was Sunday, so much of it was taken up by church. So it really feels like today is really our second day of REAL vacation. It makes me feel like there are more days left.

So today featured an event similar to the Day Before Vacation, but on my parents' rug, and with more mess that required a shower. But hey, there were more hands involved to manage it, so I can't complain.

The last two days have included the delightful task of working on writing our wills. Yes, I said we're spending our vacation working on wills. Yes, those things that specify what we want to happen after we die. Fun stuff for a vacation. But it really needs to be done, and trying to fit it in to our schedule at home hasn't quite worked over our last 3 years of trying...

Did you know that life is 100% fatal? Yup, it's inevitable, and as the news will attest, it can happen tragically to people who die too young. Sadly enough, with kids that need new guardians, homes that need to be sold, the belongings and responsibilities of busy lives that suddenly need to be managed. It's horrible to think that this could happen to us. But it's even more horrible to think that all of the people and creatures that depend on us would suddenly be without care. And that the people who are most devastated by our loss suddenly have to deal with the legal nightmare of dealing with our estate. And children. And dogs.

So BestestHusband has been working through will-making software and all of the reading that goes along with it so that these things are planned for. And we've discussed the matters that are the most terrifying to contemplate. What happens if one of us goes? If both of us? All of us? There are so many details. But if they're exhausting for us to consider, think about how exhausting and overwhelming it would be for someone else, someone outside of our family, to try to manage in our absence.

So there is some joy in writing a will. It allows us the confidence that comes with knowing that, in the event that the unthinkable happens, we can reduce the heartache and suffering of those who love us the most. And this relief, this small joy, is a great thing to have on a vacation.

2 comments:

It's a good reminder...I've had a will (and don't forget to think about health care proxy and power of attorney, for anyone reading this who doesn't have that set up either) for probably the last decade and guess what? I've made the rookie mistake of never updating it since I got married. I think I glanced at it once since then. It's so weird that you mention it now, though, because I thought about this very subject today as I drove by a large cemetery. And got my license renewed, which asks the organ donor question. So yeah, probably time to visit this topic again. My mom died rather young (44) and didn't have any of these papers in order so I can attest to the helpfulness of them. Not trying to be a downer, just trying to help your crusade to get people to address an important but unpopular topic!

We last did our wills when Dear Daughter was still in HS & Dear Middle was unmarried; they are so out of date it's not funny. And we've been meaning to update them for years, but Dear Husband says we need to know what the gum'mit is going to do about inheritance taxes & charitable donations/trusts, etc. before revisiting the subject. I just hope we don't go together because I'll be mortified if my kids see what we thought of them ten years ago!

About Me

I'm a Speech-Language Pathologist and a mom. My job is to help people learn to communicate effectively, and swallow safely. At work, I do with with people much older than me. At home, I do this with people much younger than me. As a result, I find my self saying some version of "Don't talk with your mouth full" all day long.