ETA: While the overall response to the fundraiser and pics continues to be exponentially awesome, I’ve also seen a few areas where response has begun to shift from, “I say, those poses seem remarkably impractical, and how exactly does one do that without dislocating one’s ankle?” to “Hey, guys dressing or posing like girls are both ugly and hilarious!” Which misses the point so badly it’s not even funny. Please see this follow-up post for my thoughts on the context of these poses, the hotness of John Scalzi, and my apology for not better framing and presenting this post in the first place.

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When I started the Aicardi Syndrome Fundraiser, I recruited bestselling author and ukelele prodigy John Scalzi to be a bonus goal when we hit the $1000 mark.

We raised that much on the first day. Which meant it was time to see once and for all (at least until the next round) who was the true cover-posing master!

This was the big one. After warming up, I took a break to walk off the pains of the previous poses, and to mentally prepare myself. I meditated for three days and six nights. I purified my body with a diet of crushed ice, unbuttered toast, and green Skittles. I studied one of our cat to learn the true secret of flexibility. Unfortunately, all I learned was the secret of well-timed cat farts.

But my training period was over. I put the Rocky soundtrack on the stereo, changed clothes, and began Operation Sexy Leg.

My wife took eight photos, helping me to adjust my stance each time, then giving me a chance to fall down between takes. But I think it was worth it!

Dear Internet: I present to you my version of The Taste of Night!

I’d like to thank my daughter for letting me borrow her bracelet, and my wife for the shoes and for letting me sacrifice one of her disposable razors.

But John Scalzi wanted to win this thing as much as I did. I don’t know what master he trained with, but whoever that wise and sadistic sensei might be, they turned Mister Scalzi into a posing opponent to be feared. John went all out in his own, special way.

Over on Twitter, John offered his thoughts on the process, saying, “AAAARRRGH MY HIP!”

I’d like to thank everyone for their donations and generosity so far, and John in particular for his willingness to play along. Please remember that the fundraiser runs through the end of the month, and the money raised supports both research into Aicardi Syndrome and the biannual conference which helps to unite these families, connecting them to a much-needed network of support.

And remember, there are more goals to come, including the $5000 group pose with me, Scalzi, Stross, Rothfuss, and Kowal! You know you want to see this, and we’re getting so close!