The Mouthful

Sitting Out V-Day

Look, whether you’re coupled up or single, Valentine’s Day is pretty much bullshit. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a big fan of love and appreciating your significant other and all, but on V-Day it’s next to impossible to do so without getting all stressed out and, worse, if you’re single it’s just a huge, society-wide reminder that you’re all alone.

And forget going out to eat on Valentine’s. Even if you’ve managed to think far enough ahead to get reservations, it seems like every single place is ridiculously crowded and you’ll be elbow-to-elbow with the most annoying people on earth: couples in love. Besides, who are we kidding? There is no way that the experience can match the load of expectations that come with Valentine’s the way a thrift store mattress comes with a horde of bed bugs.

Besides, who are we kidding? There is no way that the experience can match the load of expectations that come with Valentine’s the way a thrift store mattress comes with a horde of bed bugs.

So I say, to hell with it. Stay in. And if you’re not up for cooking yourself and/or your honey a prize meal, order take-out. Here are a few places I recommend calling up for an anti-Valentine’s dinner. Don’t forget to light a candle or two as you unwrap the plastic bags and open the styrofoam.

They’ve been around since “2000” was a sign of the future, and they’re still just as good as ever. A cup of delectable pho, a plate of egg rolls, maybe a little banh, or, my favorite, the vermicelli and pork with a cup of fermented fish juice and Sriracha sauce. Whatever you order, it’s almost always ready by the time you drive over.

There are few things better than a pizza at home while the rest of the world goes crazy all around you. Golden Crown makes their pies with house baked crust and fresh, hydroponically grown ingredients. You can order online and maybe grab a loaf of freshly baked green chile cheese bread while you’re at it. And they always throw in a few of their excellent biscochitos to boot.

Albuquerque’s oldest Indian restaurant is also one of its best. Chances are that it will be packed on Valentine’s night, so no matter what your romantical situation is, you can’t go wrong with brown bagging it. A saag paneer, a sweet lassi, and thou, my love.

ABC Chinese

8720 Menaul Blvd NE

(505) 292-8788

Chinese take-out is the best, isn’t it? And ABC should be on anybody’s list for pick up. Its Heights location is pretty old school, and maybe a bit run down, but the food is top notch. There’s no website, so plan ahead and swing by for a take-out menu before the crowds hit.