The Heaviness Test

So are you HEAVY my friend?
No, i don't mean "Are you a big mac eatin', armchair parked, big ass motherf%cker?".
I mean; ARE YOU HEEEEAAAVVVVYYYYY????
Do your veins burn with the rage of a thousand angry mammoths (!?) when you crank your favourite music? Are you an ambassador of the weightiest degree? Are you heavy? heavier? heaviest?
Hmmmmm we'll see...