Timeline: Bob Barker says why Toronto should give up its elephants

On Friday morning, former Price is Right host Bob Barker led a press conference detailing why cold-climate Toronto should give up its zoo’s three elephants, move them by truck to California and pay $15-million for an immersive, digitally interactive elephant exhibit in its stead. The Post’s Michael Fraiman went to the conference to hear them out.

9:00 Things get going. Mr. Barker begins to talk about the plight of the elephants: “I get the impression that there’s a great deal of sympathy in the media in Toronto.” Clearly he has never met my editors.

9:03 Mr. Barker introduces the first speaker. I suddenly realize he won’t be doing much of the talking himself, and prepare for an hour of elephant lectures by various zoologists and nature conservationists.

9:04 At the snack table. I can recommend the croissants.

9:12 Dr. Keith Lindsay calls elephants an “umbrella species.” I understand that he is referring to a species whose existence alters its surroundings, but I prefer to think of it as a metaphor for their big floppy ears.

9:21 In introducing the next speaker, we keep expecting Mr. Barker to end with, “Come on down!” We are continually disappointed.

9:28 Dr. Lori Marino: “There is no substantive evidence that zoos promote education in any meaningful, measurable sense of the word.”

9:31 Mr. Barker mentions the proposal for a new, $15-million exhibit, with several-dozen-metre-tall screens and a rumbling floor and surround-sound stereo elephant noises. “It would truly be educational,” Mr. Barker explains. “Unlike going and watching some elephant standing there, watching it bob its head, bob its head, sway back and forth because it’s so whacked out from being under such mental strain for so long.” He’s right, of course. If I wanted to see that, I could walk down Yonge Street.

9:42 Now screening a short video of a potential home for the elephants at a California sanctuary. Aerial shots show us dozens of acres of open fields, grasslands, and 24-hour care for these poor old creatures.

10:02 One reporter asks Mr. Barker about Lucy, a lone elephant in the Edmonton zoo. “Lucy?” Mr. Barker repeats, sounding enraged. “I have never been so unfortunate as to have to deal with people like the govenment of Edmonton.” Fighting words, Bob. “I don’t know whether [Mayor Stephen Mandel] is a complete dictator or what.”

10:10 How much would Mr. Barker donate to help move the elephants? Why should taxpayers fork up nearly $100,000 to move three elephants to California when we can’t effectively move ourselves across Eglinton Avenue? The experts explain the process, and Mr. Barker shies away from specifying how much money he would personally front. He is meeting Rob Ford later in the afternoon, apparently, to talk it over. “I think he’s open-minded,” said Mr. Barker. It’s not clear whether he has ever met the Mayor before.

Epilogue Mayor Ford later has this to say about the elephants’ future: “That’s up to the Zoo board. Obviously, if elephants are being hurt or dying in these conditions, I don’t want to see any animal die. But we’ve had elephants up here for a long, long time, so I’d have to see a pretty strong argument to move them out.”