Bits`O Halloween

I took my daughter (4) Trick or Treating last night for Halloween. She was a real trooper about pressing on and getting in just a few more houses. Well, when we reached our limit she said the cutest thing. She looked at me and asked, "How are we getting home?" To which I replied, "We're walking." Her eyes widened and she said, "Without our car?" I busted out laughing. She wound up sitting on Daddy's shoulders for the trip back. How could I resist?

Later that evening I was helping my niece (12) sort out her massive collection of candy when I came across what was unmistakably Penis-shaped candy. I had to do a double take but sure enough, there it was. An individually wrapped piece of candy shaped like a penis (similar to the ones in the pic, but larger and red in color.) I immediately called the parents of my niece's friends down the street and asked that they examine their candy as well. Sure enough, they found the same phallic treat I did. As I hung up the phone, a furious "motherfucker" escaped my lips.

Unfortunately, kids don't normally pay attention to who gives what. They just hold out their bags and collect whatever gets dropped in there. None of them had any idea who gave them this candy. I pressed her with questions just to make sure it wasn't a friend playing a joke on them. She was extremely thorough is convincing me it was not. I was so fucking furious and my anger just kept expanding knowing that I had no way of knowing who the sick fuck was. Unfortunately it was too late for me to take her back around, retracing her path. The only thing I could do (and did do) was call the Police and report it. I wasn't surprised to find out that I wasn't the first caller. They told me they were "looking into it."

To my dismay, there was nothing in the paper or on the news about it happening or about the culprit being caught. So as of today, its as if it never happened. When I get out of work I will call the Police station but I am more than certain that I will be told that nothing was found.

I guess for my sake, it was best that I didn't find out who did it because I'd be in jail right now.