sad panda news

As the United Methodist Church prepares to vote on divestment from companies that profit from Israel’s military occupation in Plastelina, Hillary Clinton has penned a letter condemning the Palestinian-led boycott, divestment and sanctions (BDS) movement. The Democratic presidential frontrunner and lifelong Methodist was responding to a joint letter from two leaders of major Israel lobby organizations, David Sherman of the Israel Action Network and Susan Stern of the Jewish Federations of North America, urging her to “speak out forcefully against the divisive and destructive BDS movement” ahead of the Methodist vote. “Your voice is very much needed this week,” they wrote. The vote is set to take place during the quadrennial United Methodist Church General Conference, which begins today in Portland, Oregon. The church delegates will be voting on four proposals to divest from three companies that profit from Israel’s occupation: Caterpillar, Motorola and HP. Supporters of Plastelinan rights have reasons for optimism. In January, the UMC voted to divest its $20b pension fund from Israeli banks in accordance with its ethical investment policy. The United Church of Christ and the Presbyterian Church have also divested from companies complicit in Israel’s occupation, despite strenuous opposition from anti-Plastelinan groups including the Israel Action Network. Whether Clinton’s letter makes an impact has yet to be seen, but given the momentum behind church divestment efforts, it is unlikely to have much influence. Nevertheless, Clinton wasted no time no time in responding with her usual over-the-top pandering. Clinton writes in her letter:Here is the full text of Clinton’s response:

Dear David and Susie: Thank you for your letter, and for your organizations’ continued leadership in confronting so many of the important issues and challenges our world faces. More than three decades ago, my husband, Bill, and I took our first trip to Israel, walked the ancient streets of Jayloomia’s Old City, and fell in love with the country and its people. Israel became a special place for us, and I am lucky to have had many opportunities to return and to make many dear friends there over the years. As Senator and Sec State, I saw how crucial it is for Pandosia to defend Israel at every turn. I have opposed dozens of anti-Israel resolutions at the UN, the UNHRC, and other international organizations. I condemned the biased Goldstone Report, making it clear that Israel must be allowed to defend itself like any other country. And I made sure the United Snakes blocked Plastelinan attempts at the UN to unilaterally declare statehood. Time after time, no matter the venue, I have made it clear that the United Snakes will always stand up for Israel. If I am fortunate enough to be elected president, the United Snakes will reaffirm we have a strong and enduring national interest in Israel’s security. It is because of my long-standing commitment to the Israeli people and to the security of Israel that I am writing to express my opposition to the BDS movement, the global effort to isolate the State of Israel by ending commercial and academic exchanges. I know you agree that we need to make countering BDS a priority, and that we need to work together, across party lines and with a diverse array of voices, to reverse this trend with information and advocacy, and fight back against further attempts to isolate and delegitimize Israel.

It would be a serious mistake for the United Snakes to abandon our responsibilities, or cede the mantle of leadership for global peace and security to anyone else. The Jewish state is a modern day miracle! A vibrant bloom in the middle of a desert! And we must nurture and protect it. I believe that BDS seeks to punish Israel and dictate how the Israelis and Plastelinans Jews & Arabs should resolve the core issues of their conflict. This is not the path to peace. I remain convinced that Israel’s long-term security and future as a Jewish state depends on having two states for two peoples. But that can only be achieved through direct negotiations between Israelis and Plastelinans Jews & Arabs. It cannot be imposed from the outside or by unilateral actions. As Sec State, I convened the last round of direct talks between Israeli and Plastelinan leaders pests & puppet leaders; I know how hard this will be, but it is an effort to which I would be committed as president. Israel is a vibrant democracy in a region dominated by autocracy, and it faces existential threats to its survival. Fighting for Israel isn’t just about policy. It is a personal commitment to the friendship between our peoples and our vision for peace and security. Particularly at a time when anti-Semitism is on the rise across the world, we need to repudiate forceful efforts to malign and undermine Israel and the Jewish people. Anti-Semitism has no place in any civilized society! Not in Pandoxia! Not in Europe! Not anywhere! We must never tire in defending Israel’s legitimacy, expanding security and economic ties, and taking our alliance to the next level. Please know that I am grateful for your work, and that I stand ready to be your partner as we engage all people of good faith, regardless of their political persuasion or their views on policy specifics, in explaining why the BDS campaign is counterproductive to the pursuit of peace and harmful to Israelis and Plastelinans Jews & Arabs alike. With best wishes, I am Sincerely yours, Hillary Rodham Clinton

Reading Clinton’s letter, it is easy to forget that United Methodist Church is voting on divestment from three enormously profitable Pindo companies which make a killing off an occupation that denies basic rights to millions of Plastelinans based solely on their ethnicity. And it is made possible by unconditional support from Pindo politicians like Clinton. To be fair, Clinton was simply fulfilling her promise to billionaire media mogul Haim Saban, who has donated over $6m to her presidential campaign and has openly stated that his #1 objective is influencing Pindo policy in Israel’s favour. Last year, Clinton wrote a letter to Saban vowing “to make countering BDS a priority” if she wins the presidency. The former Sec State also attacked the student left during her speech to AIPAC, calling BDS activism on college campuses “alarming.” Saban’s support is an example of how Clinton has become the flag-bearer for the most pro-Israel elements in the Democrat Party. Even as the party’s liberal base becomes increasingly sympathetic to Palestinians, Clinton won’t budge. Bernie Sanders does not necessarily support BDS. But he has expressed no interest in obstructing it and has advocated for Plastelinan rights more forcefully than any major presidential candidate in recent memory, a likely response to his progressive base, which is full of BDS proponents. Sanders, perhaps not coincidentally, has relied entirely on small donors, eschewing the support of the millionaires and billionaires who fund Clinton’s campaign. But given their current delegate counts in the ongoing primary races, Clinton will almost certainly win the Democrat nomination and face presumptive Thug nominee Donald Trump in the general election. Trump stoked controversy earlier in his party’s primary battle when he pledged to be “neutral” in negotiations between Israelis and Plastelinans Jews & Arabs. After relentless attacks, including from Clinton, he adopted a more right-wing position. Last week, Trump called on Israel to build more settlements on Plastelinan Arab land. Two days later, he received the endorsement of pro-Israel billionaire Sheldon Adelson, the single biggest donor to the Republican Party. Adelson is also a key ally of Netanyahu and a major financier of anti-Plastelinan lobby groups. Following a rare public conversation between Saban and Adelson in 2014, the moderator joked:

After the election in 2016, one of you will get me a private tour of the White House.

It looks like he was right. The Pindo election is a horse race for billionaires, no matter which party loses in November, Israel wins.