Mr Noddy Pertwhistle: "Capn Dip at the time of your bannination is it not true that you were involved in an art house movie project involving the Russian mafia, and was this project not to be a film heavily influenced by Francis Ford Coppola's Godfather?"

Dip: Er...I don't know what...Godfather?

Mr P: "Let me refresh your memory Capn Dip, the film was to be entitled...The Auntie!!!!!"

The smoke wafted gently in the breeze across the poop deck and all seemed right in the world.

"Objection" yelled the Counsel for the Defence Nobby Pertwhistle "Dave L is a known associate of Boris and as is messy hands in all of Boris's dirty little schemes, he is hardly going to testify against him"

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

'Boris вы будете нашим героем. Boris длиной в реальном маштабе времени!! (Boris you are our hero, Long Live Boris)' yelled the Transnitrian National Mens choir, who stacked the galleries in support of their hero.

Next their conductor stood up in the court and the entire choir sung the soccer anthem Go West:

Grand Deducer Watson of Sherlock. NoName, no pack drill. Astral zone changed five times a day (flexible). Great at manifesting parking spaces by thought control. Hatred of terminology of survivors and commitment to win-win reality.

A doctor attended the buck toothed man just as another coach load of spectators pulled up outside the door.
Judge Lady Prunella Boadicea Springer-Spaniel Bonehart, JD, MBE, DVM, RPh, EdD was furious. "Who's selling all these dodgy tickets?" Just then, through the window, she noticed a hot dog seller stuffing a large wad of notes into his pocket...

....... that's fake Fishe Heade Stewe. I can smell a rat at a hundred paces and this is right under my nose." and as the words left her mouth, her nose turned bright blue and spittle started faliing from her eyelashes. There was pandemonium in the court as one by one everyone's noses turned blue until there wasn't a .................

Grand Deducer Watson of Sherlock. NoName, no pack drill. Astral zone changed five times a day (flexible). Great at manifesting parking spaces by thought control. Hatred of terminology of survivors and commitment to win-win reality.