Wednesday, June 8

Sorry, but...

I've been completely shit at posting of late haven't I?Truth is, since Monday, I've been really busy. And when I say busy, I mean productive busy, not pissing about doing fuck all busy. I've got a job in a pub- making that 2 jobs in total, and I started that this week. It was also my friend's birthday. I've read 5 books in two days and there is one other thing.

The gym. I actually booked a one to one with a trainer, Sam, that I wasn't in love with, to get a program that is really challanging. So, I turned up on time and my favourite trainer- Ashley- who is possibly the most beautiful human being alive- said he'd be doing my program because Sam was ill.

Then the doom took over me. Ashley is the one my Mum calls 'the nasty one' because apparantly he really pushes people and has been known to make people cry. But I was brave. Internally, I knew that it was EXACTLY my luck for this to happen, but I also realised this might actually be a good thing for me.

So I told him about how I had returned to uni in May, and drank more in a month than many people will ever drink in their entire lives, and then became realy unfit because I was too hungover to do anything. I told him that I actually intended to go to the gym and work out, that I didn't want to be like those women who turn up in a push up bra and make up and do yoga in the weights room in a sad attempt to pull.

It started off just fine. We did all my cardio and chatted about uni, school, places to go out in Nottingham. I spoke about the overwhelming stupidosity of men these days, and he accused me of being picky. Of course I'm picky! If I wasn't I would end up with one of the men from Saturday night. Most had their shirts tucked in (big mistake) and had completely tragic hair. Well sorry. I'm going to be picky and I'm going to like it.

So back to the story. We moved to the weights, and foolishly, by then, I'd been fooled into thinking he was a nice person. So first machine was the leg press, which I normally do about 60-70kg on- I was told to lift my own body weight on this one. Well he told me that wasn't good enough and kept putting it up until we got to 110kg. It was like lifting my father! I was making sex faces. After that, there were many horribly heavy weights he made me do, and I was actually quite scared at how much I can lift when I try. Then he told me we'd run out of time and could come back at 10am tomorrow?

So 10am yesterday, earliest I've been up for about a year, I turned up, to do my arms and abs. This time, he underestimated how strong I am. Setting all the weights way lower than I normally do, he kept putting them up, and then pulling some odd faces. He said he didn't know many girls this strong- I felt so proud- then realised this makes me a total manbian. Who finds 'I am freakishly strong!' attractive?

Then we had a little argument over music- I won't go into it, but he did tell me to buy an mp3 player, and set me some impossibly difficult ab exercises. Then, made me make an appointment for 3 weeks time for a review. He asked me if I intended to stick to it- frankly, I'm too afraid not to. So I returned to the gym today, and had to find him having forgotten how to use ALL the machines.'I thought you'd forget' he said. Tosser. He wasn't even impressed that I had bought an mp3 player that very day!

Speaking of mp3 players, for all my love of music, I am shockingly behind in devices to play it. I've only been downloading music for about a year, my car still has no 'sound system' to speak of, and I have only owned an mp3 for a day. I always said, when I could afford it, I'd get a CD player and proper speakers in my car- but that day never came. But I bought a really cheap mp3 player- only £40. So instead of having the gym's completly shit dance music, I now have a proper soundtrack.

For cardio, it's Mylo, Prodigy, Basement Jaxx and a bit of garage. Then I have rnb music by female artists for when I do other stuff- see, when I think I've done enough, I'll be reminded that JLo, Ciara, and the rest have really good bodies and that motivates me!

So I may not be posting much in the next couple of weeks, I need to kick my arse into shape. To be honest, between working two jobs (I'm doing 50 hours a week, eek!) and brutal new gym program, and of course, going out, I'm too tired to even go shopping. But it's good for me, and once I look gorgeous (we hope) I will return to posting all the time. Okay?