MTV Movie Awards 2014 // Le Blow rates the red carpet looks

The MTV Movie Awards. Like the Oscar’s creepier, needier cousin, where awards are given out just to get celebrities to show up (HI, Mark Wahlberg and your Generation Award) and viewers hope in vain that a real life couple will win Best Kiss, so that they can re-live that (frankly amazing) moment between Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling, all those years ago.

But – let it go for now, as we at Le Blow couldn’t give a monkey’s about who won what. In our world, it’s ALWAYS about the red carpet looks. And rating them! So here’s a dutifully picked selection of the best and the worst, for your reading pleasure:

Rihanna – 1/10

How lovely of Rihanna to turn up looking like a member of En Vogue circa 1994, draped in one of Drake’s bed sheets? As much as we’re fans of those things seperately, together, this is a hot mess. And not in a good way.

Leslie Mann – 7/10

She’s a hot mum! To teenagers no less! Hilarious, then, that Leslie managed to look at least 10 years younger than many who are actually half her age. Loving the orange heels.

Nicki Minaj – 2/10

Two marks for not looking like a clown, for once in her life. No marks for her perma-scowl. Guessing she misses the wigs and stuff.

Shailene Woodley – 9/10

We might not be sold on Shailene’s whole ‘eat clay, get your pussy lots of sun’ mantra, but we’re deffo sold on her olive green leather two piece. Which, when writen down, sounds more like something Sinitta would wear. Loving it, though.

Lupita Nyong’o – 8/10

We are HUGE Lupita fans at Le Blow. She can’t put a foot wrong in our eyes. And luckily, she didn’t. While it may not be as memorable as her other recent red carpet looks, you can’t deny that this girl gets the shape of her dresses spot on every time, and her approach to colour is nothing short of amazing.

Jessica Alba – 6/10

Close, but not quite. We’re loving the colour combos, but the ‘flirtyness’ of the skirt is a bit too twee. Also, after Shailene, if a crop top isn’t olive green leather, don’t talk to me! Great hair, though.

Grumpy Cat – 9/10

Loses a point for not coming up with his owm hat trend. We hope he got Pharrell’s approval.