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my concern with doing that (at least in the case of my stupid ****ing Honda) is that all of the crud that gets broken up will then clog the oil passages so I've made my peace with my engine just looking terrible until it blows up

^ where do you come up with these ideas?? thats mythical nonsense. chunks of crap will not break up and get clogged anymore than they would running normal oil.
ATF is chuck full of detergents. they dissolve solids not sheet them off the bottom of your oil pan. I've been running ATF in my oil, in all of my cars for the last 16 years.......

Lol, well I used a full bottle of seafoam in the tank, 55% of a bottle in the crank, and another bottle (top end manifold spray) down the intake mani. Also used the suction from vacuum off the brake booster hose and got a couple qts down that way.

Let it heat soak for 10 min and started her back up. Just as much smoke as before. Although my supposed alternator rattle has gone.. But I think that is just because I wasn't driving and it wasn't under load.

agtx, it was smoking decently before I did work, but it was worst after so it is hard to say. But I will be pulling the VC later today (hot as **** right now) and I'll be looking at the baffles as well as the inside.

I try a qt of atf in the next oil change.

My only concern is that if it is the VC plate baffles, I have no idea how to remedy that. Dealer has baffles at 25 a pop (assuming it comes with gasket), but cutting my own gasket would be nice... but I feel that would not work out well.

Also, I'm pretty sure a couple thread holes are stripped and I suck with tap and dye lol.

so, on a toyota 4AC motor in a clean AE86 SR5 coupe, the PCV baffle in the head has slots in it that basically separate the oil vapor and let it through the intake, and the liquid drips back inside and drains to the oil pan. it was smoking like a beast, and he thought he had popped the head gasket, so I ended up buying the car for cheap.

turns out, when somebody painted the valve cover, they squished the little slots that allowed liquid to drain back in, basically dumping oil directly into the intake manifold and acting as a cropduster.

check your PCV system to make sure that there's not gallons of oil just feeding through that way...... not saying it IS the problem, but it was the problem on one car that I had.. I did compression/leakdown tests and all that jazz, and couldn't find a problem, turns out it was a 2-minute fix with a screwdriver to pop the slots open again....

one thing, I don't remember seeing if you were ever able to do a leakdown test... if nothing else pull the dipstick, get a regulated 80psi from a compressor pushing into each cylinder one at a time, and then listen... if you can hear anything coming out of the dipstick tube or out of the crankcase through the oil drainbacks... you could have some sort of HG leak between a combustion chamber and an oil galley.

Also, with the Seafoam in the fuel, if there WAS a previous oil leak that built up sludge on the backside of the intake valves, the smoke could be just all of that deposited sludge still being washed off the back of the valves and out the exhaust. I've never done quite that large of an amount of seafoam at once.

Hell, it could even be the valve stem seals.

How long have you idled the engine after starting, to see if the smoke stops after awhile?