Installing Crunchbang (latest pro build) in virtualbox. I set 11.4ish GB for the virtual hd. Guided partitioning doesn't give me much in the way of / or swap, instead blowing most on /home. Since I'm not intending to store many files on it, I wanted a different split.

I intended to give about 8GB to /, and 1GB to Swap with the rest to /home. Alls well and good, except the flipping partitioner doesn't seem to give me an option to set a partition as Swap.

Which Crunchbang ISO are you using? I've tried crunchbang-10-20120207-i386.bpo.iso and crunchbang-11-20120806-amd64.iso and both gave a graphical installer with a swap option. The Crunchbang 10 ISO also had a text install option, as in your screenshot, but this also allowed swap partitions to be created.

"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." (Albert Einstein)