Lab sighting

Published April 23rd, 2011 by Bobby Henderson

We had a sighting of the FSM at work today. I work in a lab and we heard an awful crash in our stock room. Upon investigation, we found this…

Normally it holds our stickers for labeling chemical bottles, but we feel we have been visited. We’re thinking of turning the stock room into a shrine, charging admission, and turning ourselves into monks of the FSM. Instead of habits though, we’ll wear our Tyvek lab bunny suits.

We think the FSM was trying to tell us not to turn that room into a BL2 lab.

Darn, what do the Christian idolotriers call it… It’s like a possession but by god… I’m not sure…
Did it start stickering in tongues?

Anyway, we need a better term than sightings. As a panspaggetist I believe the FSM is within all things, but sometimes he chooses to reveal himself to us, to guide us in our faith. Sadly, he is often mistaken for looking like a bearded man, especially because when communicating to the unconverted he speaks to people through the visage of a pirate, to look less bizarre to those unfarmiliar with his divine appearance. Praze be, and may your beers be

Darn, what do the Christian blasphemes call it… It’s like a possesion but by god… I’m not sure…
Did it start stickering in tongues?
Anyway, we need a better term than sightings. As a panspaggetist I believe the FSM is within all things, but sometimes he chooses to reveal himself to us, to guide us in our faith. Sadly, he is often mistaken for looking like a bearded man, especially because when communicating to the unconverted he speaks to people through the visage of a pirate, to look less bizarre to those unfarmiliar with his divine appearance. Praise be, and may your troves be ever filled.

[PS. The double post is due to an accidentally premature posting. If you are a moderator please delete the first of these two comments]

I like that. It also points out one of the major differences between our religion and the x-tians: The FSM is invisible unless he chooses to reveal himself. Zombie Jeebus is always either running away or getting lost, hence the “sightings”.