Lenore Skomal: Small stature gets short shrift

Lenore Skomal

November 21, 2013 12:01 AM

Lenore Skomal

November 21, 2013 12:01 AM

When people meet me in person, I get one -- or both -- of two responses. The first and most predictable is: "You don't look anything like your photo." Hopefully, that's a good thing, because I hate my photo. But sometimes I'm left to wonder: Do I look worse than my photo? I'm always hesitant to ask any follow-up questions for fear of hearing the truth. To my way of thinking, the better way to phrase it might be "your photo doesn't do you justice."

Not only does my photo not resemble me, it clearly makes me appear tall. Which is funny because it's a headshot. I can't tell you how many times people have said to me, "I didn't realize you were short."

Now, as a lifelong short person, may I gently point out that those of us whom you might consider vertically challenged don't need to be reminded.

We already know. In fact, I don't call myself the "s" word. I prefer the phrase "not tall."

Back in Catholic school, every ritual that required a lineup was done in size order, which meant me, Robin Sherwood and Eileen Mahoney routinely trying to avoid being first in line. Whether it be stretching on tip toes, wearing our thicker-heeled Buster Browns or elongating our necks, we'd try every trick in the shrimpy persons' book to appear taller, so as to graduate to the coveted place of third in line. Sadly, I never made it.

So when people meet me, gasp, and have to look down to find my face, it no longer fazes me. I know it's coming. When you're my height, you're used to the prejudice. But short is not a bad thing despite the evidence so obvious in the English language. If you're short with someone, it's tantamount to being curt. Short-tempered? You're a crank. Shortsighted people can't see beyond their own noses. And if you're short of cash, you're broke.

While I admit that having to hem every pair of pants, buy ridiculously high heels just to be average height and accustom myself to ankle socks that reach to my knees can be trying, I've embraced my height. Because short is merely a state of mind.

But I caution you when you do meet people who are not tall, please refrain from petting our heads, trying to pick us up in a bear squeeze (just because you can) and referring to us as "cute." We are not pets, pitiful waifs or little babies. We are tall people packaged efficiently.

LENORE SKOMAL writes every Thursday. If you enjoy this column, you can order her book with a collection of them at www.lenoreskomal.net. You can read her blog at www.goerie.com/blogs/gutcheck.