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Friday, 15 February 2019

Mel Schilling, the psychologist on 'Married At First Sight' who called show participant Bronson out for the use of his word c*nt on TV, stands by her words.

Mel Schilling on 'Talking Married'

On 'Talking Married', the weekly show which features interviews with 'married' couples from current and past #MAFS seasons, as well as the resident TV experts, Mel joined relationships expert John Aiken for a prerecorded interview where the elephant in the room was tackled head on.With a gazillion comments written on myriad social media posts, as well as articles deconstructing what happened during last Sunday's commitment ceremony, even a petition to have Mel sacked (at least count with over 61,000 signatures), Mel and John answered questions from the wonderful show hosts Shelly Horton and Jayne Azzopardi, with the line of questioning centring on Mel confrontation of Bronson for his choice of language directed to his TV brideInes.But the psychologist stands by her words, despite massive public backlash against her."It's actually never excusable to use that language toward anyone," she told the panel on Wednesday night's episode of 'Talking Married'."It's disrespectful, and it cuts down someone's self esteem and it can have lasting effects. So, I'm always going to call out that behaviour."Missed the 'Talking Married' ep? Here it is in full, and the Mel and John interview is in segment two of this episode:CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL EPISODE.Mel took Bronson to task about a derogatory term he used to describe his wife Ines, where he said about her during the commitment ceremony:"When we did the questionnaire thing, Ines was amazing that night," he began.

"Like really amazing, I loved her to pieces that night. The next morning, the hulk come out. Straight back to BEEP.

"I'm not calling her a BEEP, I'm just saying she acts like a BEEP."

And then Mel started with her advice to Bronson.

"When you use language like that in relation to a woman, how do you expect her to respond to you? A tip from me to you: Don't use language like that if you want any chance of a relationship," she told Bronson.This week, speaking on 'Talking Married' about the now controversial comment, Mel also made a point of making it clear that gender has nothing to do with the advice she gives participants."If you looked around the room and saw all of the brides and grooms, their reaction was the same. Using that language is inappropriate and in any setting toward any person, I'm going to call that out whether it's a man or a woman."Mel also let viewers know that future drama is to happen further into the experiment, in which "the women are called to account on a number of occasions, so there really is quite a balanced approach."Both John and Mel addressed the public backlash surrounding the commitment ceremony, and John Aiken put it all into perspective."My thoughts are that people are absolutely invested in this show and in the couples, and they were really outraged by some of the behaviours that they've seen."And the biggest reveal of all?The expert reminded viewers that during filming, the experts aren't privy to the footage that viewers see on TV, "So we're dealing with what's in front of us."What? Wow!So, while many are defending Bronson in line with the context of Innes's behaviour, Mel and all the experts are not seeing what we're seeing! Now that's a revelation for sure.For those playing at home, Bronson and Ines have had a fiery start to their TV marriage right from the get go.On first sight, Ines walked up the aisle to lay eyes for the first time on her new groom and what he got was: "Can you take your eyebrow ring out please?"On learning Bronson was a stripper (he actually still owns a stripper hire company), Ines was not impressed with his past profession. It all went downhill from there.On their honeymoon, while the pair were on a boat en route to a parasailing adventure, Ines is visibly shaken and Bronson is seen asking the boat skipper questions about the expedition, seemingly distressing Ines further. She tells Bronson to "shut the fuck up."During the exchange, Ines says:

"The less talking you do, it’s going to be better for me, I’m trying to compose myself,” she tells Bronson.

"Just breathe deeply," Bronson, her new husband offers.

"Shut the fu** up. When I say don’t speak shut the fu** up. Get me off the boat," she yells.

At this stage, Bronson stops playing the nice guy and admits: "As a human, you are a horrible person."

He then looks at the cameraman and asks, "Ah, too late to get a divorce?"

Bronson goes on to defend himself in front of the camera. "If I’m in the wrong... but trying to talk to someone and getting shut down and told to shut up, no I don’t think anyone deserves that."

Missed the drama?

Here is that clip for reference:

Back to the 'Talking Married' ep. John adds during the interview, the derogatory word said by Bronson's was a shock to all, "not only us, but everyone in the room… That sort of language is totally inappropriate, and we'll call it every time."Following the controversial commitment ceremony, John acknowledged Bronson was sorry and aware "he overstepped the mark with that language.""You saw a very marked difference in reactions between Bronson and Ines during that debrief," he added.On the 'Talking Married' desk that night was also season five groom Ryan Gallagher, who came out in full support of Mel, asserting that the backlash against the expert was "very unfair"."Mel backed me from the start… she called Davina out and everything she did to me. She's not biased at all… she's fantastic."Thoughts?'Married At First Sight' Season 6 airs Sunday at 7pm and Monday to Wednesday at 7.30pm on Channel Nine. For more on MAFS, including past episodes and behind-the-scenes clips, head to the MAFS official site.

Wednesday, 6 February 2019

Grab the tissues, you guys.'Real Housewives of Sydney' is legit now NOT HAPPENING.Wait what?

Okay, full disclosure: we DO prefer RHOM ('Real Housewives of Melbourne' guys, keep up, ha!) but to can the Sydney version of this wildly successful franchise. Yep. It's OVAH.After LOADS of speculation, Foxtel has officially pulled the plug on the 'Real Housewives of Sydney'.

Foxtel’s executive director of television Brian Walsh confirmed to TV Tonight that the Sydney edition of the global 'Real Housewives' franchise will not be returning for a second season.

So. Let's talk about Ines. Ines Basic.The whole world* (actually just people who watch 'Married At First Sight') is talking about one of the brides on the hit show for the 2019 season. Okay, talking about most of them, but just when we were reeled in, thinking that Elizabeth would be THE most talked about TV bride, Ines has figuratively sidled up and said... "Hold my beer..." you ain't seen nothing yet.Yes, we know the chatter about the show."Oh, this show is scripted.""Oh it's all a set up, and these people are here for Instagram followers..." etc etc etcOkay, yeah, cool.BUT!To have it be seemingly okay for Ines to, well, "carry on like a pork chop" and go NEXT LEVEL POSTAL on her new husband Bronson is just SO NOT COOL.I am not a woman hater, I am not a man hater.BUT. When Ines and her new 'husband' Bronson have exchanges like this, I am baffled.Ines to Bronson: “I just need you to shut the fuck up right now. I need you to shut up.” Bronson, in shock, does indeed shut the fuck up.

They're on a boat, on their honeymoon, Ines hates boats. And this moment. And life, we think, too.She continues to yell at him. “When I tell you to shut the fuck up, I mean SHUT THE FUCK UP!”

It defies belief that this kind of thing is not vetted, not reprimanded by producers, no indication that there might be counselling for Ines. And Bronson. Nothing.

Now, you KNOW what I am going to say here: IF THE ROLES WERE REVERSED THERE WOULD BE AN OUTCRY. That is, if this was Bronson's dialogue to Ines, it would be understandably critiqued and written about no end, social media would be ON FIRE, and it would be vilified endlessly.

Here's what we say to that: this is also NOT acceptable behaviour from a woman to a man.

I do not care what kind of trauma you have been through. Ines has been through unspeakable trauma, so has Bronson. He has lost three family members all in a row (mum, two brothers), and Ines' family were refugees and she saw more trauma than a child and teen need to see.

But please people. On what planet is this shit treatment acceptable?

Here are some video snippets for context, then below... what a Channel Nine spokesperson has said today:

In light of posts on Ines on Instagram having the commenting function switched off, here is what they said, and some context.

A spokesperson for Channel 9 admitted the social medial team had "proactively" restricted commenting on posts about Ines.

"We take our duty of care seriously, and vigilant social media moderation is an important part of this," said the spokesperson.

"Due to the high volume of adverse comments on Ines’ posts, Nine’s social media team acted proactively to moderate appropriately."

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About Me

I grew up in Sydney, still here. Studied Communications at uni, married, had twins. Sure, my children are my life. But I also had a whole other life before them I worked very hard for. And now, I juggle; sometimes excelling, sometimes not so much. I like the former, and strive for this daily. I’m a journalist (I’ve written for Marie Claire Australia, Madison magazine, Jetstar magazine, Studio magazines, Practical Parenting, Cream magazine, Cosmopolitan Middle East and Australia + more) blogger (for my blogs, plus Debrief Daily, mamamia, The Punch, + more) and PR, and I’m also now an author. My book 'The Australian Ageing Generation Handbook' is about carers, for carers, for me, for my beloved late mother. I am VERY proud of it. We all become carers - this is THAT book for YOU. My partner in life is a tad OCD and I take full advantage of that (my house = spotless). My twins - Rafael and Estella: I love them a ridiculous amount. But as all mothers know, you need balance, darling. The blogs I write are my passions: www.josiesjuice.blogspot.com.au wwwtwinnieworld.blogspot.com.au www.ourautismadventures.blogspot.com.au http://www.oursandwichgeneration.blogspot.com.au