Your Blogging Staff

Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.

Wonderful. I've been around a lot of fish, including some close-up sharks, and my degree is in biology. I never knew until now that fish could growl.
Each and every time on screen and all sounding exactly alike.

Ever watch "River Monsters" on Animal Planet? That guy catches critters that make those CG piranhas look like fish sticks. He caught a snapping turtle in the Ganges by ACCIDENT that I'm still having nightmares about.

I had a 150 gallon tank with five Red-bellied Piranhas in it until my house burned down last week. They were paranoid fish that ran to the other side of the tank whenever I came into the room, and frantically tried to escape if I had to put a hand in the water. Piranha attack stories are usually greatly exaggerated, but maybe they have a secret superfish society.

The fire marshal thinks the fire may have started around the wiring to my lizard cage in another room. He never considered the possibility of an airborne piranha attack on the lizard, and I had never taught the lizard karate. Should I tell the insurance adjuster?

Piranhas are wimps. Drop a Piranha in a tank with an Oscar and you get a tank with one well fed Oscar in it. And an easy $20 if you bet on the Oscar. Not that I ever did anything like that in college. Nope. Not me.

Sorry about the house, Ralph.
A few years ago, we had to evacuate because of a hurricane. I tried to pack as much electronic equipment into the car as I could, then got stuck out of state and had to ship it back to Florida. Very expensive.
That's when I figured that insurance is God's way of protecting us from disaster.
Now, I just take frequent photo documentation of every room in my houses. It would help with insurance claims.
Here's wishing you sympathetic insurance agents.

umm.. not to be a tool or any thing, but catfish actually do growl. at least some of them do. i've encountered at least three species that audibly expressed their pissed-offness at me for catching them.

I have a problem with the premise for this show. No, it's not the bad acting. No it's not the cheesy dialog. No, it's not the fact that Tiffany has bigger bosoms than when she had her hit back in the 80's. It's the fact that SyFy keeps funding these purposely low-budget, poor visual effects shows. I sure wish they'd stop and make more stuff on the level of Tinman.