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8.23.2015

How far along: 39 weeksSize: Small ripe watermelonSymptoms: Very achy and tired. Pressure everywhere. And now I'm swelling. I can't wear my wedding ring anymore and I just feel puffy and waterlogged in general all the time. Definitely the most I've ever weighed as well. Prepping for baby: Still trying to gather my anxious mind. Josh has scheduled a lot of a last minute work around the house so the chaos here isn't helping. I know that it will all get done and be so pretty when it's done. I waited to order a few of her non-urgent things because her stroller was on backorder and I wanted the reward points from Nordstrom. So in the waiting, I actually found another stroller in my late night researching that I love more. But since its estimated delivery is too close to when we will be in the hospital, I will just order the rest of her stuff once we get safely home rather than risk boxes sitting on my porch. Our bags are packed for the hospital. Please keep us in your prayers for a safe delivery and healthy baby/momma.

Sleep: Still hard to sleep. Even harder because I get caught up enjoying her late night wiggling. Sleeping on my right side also makes my hips hurt like crazy so I'm mainly on the left most of the night and wake up with crazy sheet indentations on my skin. Movement: Her movements are pretty pronounced to anyone who looks at my belly and if she finds a cozy spot on one side, I'm completely and noticeably lopsided. I am truly going to miss how incredible the movement is.Changes from last week: The swelling is the biggest part. I found the very first piece of jewelry that Josh ever bought me; a little silver and brass "H" ring when we were dating that we fondly called my promise ring. It was a size too large but the only one in the store and I loved it. I had even told him that we didn't need an engagement ring and I would proudly wear this one forever (well, he got a beast of an engagement ring anyway but I really would have worn this one forever). Who could have known that God saw I would need this ring again in the future; that I would need it at the very end of carrying our sweet little girl. I absolutely hate being ringless and this little sentimental ring of metal has fixed that problem completely.Best moment of the week: Final date weekend. Josh and I have been together for over six years (married for almost five of them). That's a lot of time to know, grow, and love each other. I am so glad that we had all those years to ourselves and were able to plan this next chapter of our lives. Word on the street is our lives will be forever changed and we vowed to never lose our roots this weekend. I can only imagine how easy it is to get caught up in our new life of baby priorities but our most loving mentors always advise: God first, marriage second, children third. And not in the sense that you abandon your child for each other but that you love your children so much that if you don't work hard at your marriage, your children cannot thrive like they would in a house built on love. Marriage, like children, isn't easy. But with hard work and commitment they both will bear the most rewarding fruits of this incredible life.

Looking forward to: God breathing sweet life into my baby with the miraculous sound of her first cry. Holding her close, locking eyes with her, and being able to say "I love you" with a power I've never experienced before. Seeing Josh's eyes well up with grateful and joyful tears as he gets to hold his precious daughter for the first time. Getting to know this incredible life God has made - from how she eats and sleeps to how she reacts to everything around her. Watching her grow into the incredible woman I know she will be and being able to share my testimony of God's love with her as she forms her own walk with Him. There's so many things to look forward to, I cannot even put it into words without absolutely bursting into tears like I am now. My heart is full. And my heart has never been more thankful. (And of course, rinse, repeat...) Still every single moment left of this pregnancy. I cherish every ache and discomfort because I realize how fast this chapter has gone and I can't wait to hold my sweet love in my arms but I sure have enjoyed carrying her.

Scripture for the week: God makes His people strong, God gives His people peace. - Psalm 29:11 ---- Worrying can cause straightforward things to be blown out of proportion (my "chaotic" house combined with my impending labor, for example). God is telling me to keep it simple. He has all the strength I need and all the peace necessary for this time. I need to banish fear and unbelief. I need to eradicate negativity. He has made me capable and given me His composure; peace that surpasses all understanding. I need to rest in His promises... Father, I strip away the complicated and get back to the basics. You have made me strong and given me peace. I take that into the labor and delivery of my baby and into my home. In Your Most Holy Name, Amen.

8.16.2015

How far along: 38 weeksSize: PumpkinSymptoms: All over aches (primarily my hips), GI stuff, sleepy, sleepy, sleepy...Prepping for baby: I've been crazy emotional this week. It's really hitting me hard that she's not going to be squirming in my belly soon and I have shed a lot of tears over it. The other day I realized that she would soon be sleeping in a crib and not safe in my belly and TEARS. This has been such a wonderful experience. Not because I didn't have a rough pregnancy, because if I chose to live in negativity, I really did have some hard things to get through too. I simply choose thankfulness instead and have absolutely enjoyed carrying her.Sleep: It's really hard to sleep. My mind races and my hips ache. So I lie awake online window shopping. Which honestly, I should probably read some good parenting books or better yet talk to God. My emotions and mind are all over the place this week and I'm working hard to reel it in. I know I need to sleep now when I can, but it is definitely easier said than done for me. Keep in mind I've only been able to take three naps this WHOLE time.Movement: Still my wiggly girl. Movement has been my very favorite part of this experience. Feeling her little feet shuffle around and her head push against my ribs and stomach has been such a wildly fun experience.Changes from last week: Officially feeling like there is a pumpkin in there. My stomach is so tight and I waddle like a penguin. Although I can't nap, I've essentially chilled out on activity for myself. I haven't been doing my walks or really going anywhere. I'm trying to just be still and enjoy the remaining time.Best moment of the week: My brother and his girlfriend came to visit last weekend. I REALLY missed seeing him so it was great to have a few days to hang out. We mainly just ate a lot of food (thanks so much, Sherie for your cooking skills and cleaning help!) but I definitely enjoyed every delectable calorie. He gave me some great advice and shared some funny stories from when he became a dad. I love soaking in time with all these people I have tucked so deep in my heart.

Looking forward to: (rinse, repeat) Still every single moment. I cherish every ache and discomfort because I realize how fast this chapter has gone and I can't wait to hold my sweet love in my arms but I sure have enjoyed carrying her.

Scripture for the week: Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. - Isaiah 43:1 --- Oh fear. It's so real yet so unnecessary. I cannot tell you how many people have tried to cast their anxieties over me and how hard it is to not let those seeds grow in my heart. But God is greater than fear. I have to remind myself that although the unknown is hard for me to wrap my head around, He knows the future and that is more than enough to remain brave and faithful.

8.09.2015

How far along: 37 weeksSize: Winter MelonSymptoms: Lots of round ligament pain. She's growing and I am running out of space. Very very tired often.Prepping for baby: Now we are preparing through prayer. I think we have the basics physical needs in place. So now it's mentally preparing for the new chapter!Sleep: Finding the right position is the key to falling asleep. And often once I find it, I have to use the bathroom. It's not horrible but it's definitely harder each night to find that right spot. So thankful for all the pregnancy pillows because I'm pretty sure it would be a nightmare trying to figure it out without these things now.Movement: I was told by my doctor that the head in the ribs is worse than the feet in the ribs. It is definitely an experience to feel a head pressing hard against your rib cage. I am soaking it all in though. I have loved every wiggle, kick, hiccup, and turn this sweet girl has done.Changes from last week: I'm still getting bigger. Still no stretch marks which is a serious miracle considering how huge my stomach is now. My legs get red if I'm on them too long... no swelling, just color changes.Best moment of the week: Getting our tentative birth date for little one. It made me extremely anxious and excited. I cannot believe that there will be a little baby in our arms in 2 weeks. My heart is full. Knowing that we made it to 37 weeks was a big milestone. Pregnancy can instill so many fears and worries in your heart and there are some milestones that feel like you dropped a ton of bricks. While I focused hard to give my fears to God, the frail human in me still struggles to release at times. My cat has been super cuddly this past week. He definitely knows that something is about to change. But I love how affectionate he is right now. Josh and I also have had a lot of fun talking to our little baby while she's still cooking and just enjoying each other's company while we wait on her.

Looking forward to: (repeat from last week) Still every single moment. I cherish every ache and discomfort because I realize how fast this chapter has gone and I can't wait to hold my sweet love in my arms but I sure have enjoyed carrying her.

Scripture for the week: So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. - 2 Corinthians 4:18

8.02.2015

Size: Head of romaine lettuceSymptoms: Waddling. More round ligament pain depending on position. SO tired again. Back pain, hip pain, feet pain - all completely worth it.Prepping for baby: Car seat bases are in the vehicles (we finally did it)! Her crib and monitors are fully set up. Her clothes are washed. Swaddles are in her basket. It's getting closer and we are so excited.Sleep: Positioning is still tricky. My body fully wakes at 5am no matter what time I fell asleep. Getting out of bed is quite a fun scene too!Movement: She's still my little squirmer. I am still getting teary thinking that these are the final weeks I get to feel her life inside of me. I'm cherishing every single second of being able to truly "hug" every bit of her.Changes from last week: I'm huge. My feet don't really swell but my legs and feet do get redder when I'm up on them for any length of time. My skin is crazier. Pregnancy did a lot of things to my skin like rashes, tags, mole changes, weird red things on my hands that the dermatologist said will go away. One mole got so out of hand I had it removed this week.Best moment of the week: Date nights with Josh. Dinners, movies, ice cream dates... We did a few of them this week. I may have been uncomfortable at the movies but I really enjoyed having us time. We had a lot of tests at our routine appointment today and they looked great. I am so thankful that everything is checking out so well. I'm just a ball of emotions - happy, anxious, nervous, loving, excited, etc. It feels like life is beginning, not just for her but for me too!

Looking forward to: Still every single moment. I cherish every ache and discomfort because I realize how fast this chapter has gone and I can't wait to hold my sweet love in my arms but I sure have enjoyed carrying her.

Scripture for the week: I give thanks to you, O Lord my God, with all my heart; and I will glorify Your name forever. - Psalm 86:12 -- My heart is so full. This beautiful chapter is a gift from Him alone and I am forever grateful. I remember this time last year crying on my closet floor thinking I would never be able to conceive, we had tried so long. I handed my desire to Him and told Him I trusted in His plan - even if it meant I couldn't ever have a child - and here I am feeling this sweet miracle kicking me and hearing her heart beat each week at the doctor; knowing that in a few weeks I will get to hold her, lock eyes with her, and show her with each breath how much I love her. Oh how I give thanks to Him. And oh how I will glorify Him forever.

In the beginning of my documentations, I had to bait him to go by the sign. Now he goes on his own and it's really cute.