Sex & Porn Addiction

Sex & Porn Addiction Therapy

Sex and Porn addiction are probably not what you think they are. They are not about having a high sex drive, neither are they a moral failing. They are very often not about being stuck in an unhappy relationship. They are simply about being unhappy as they are both ways of managing feelings and emotions that we find difficult.

If you are reading this because you think you may be a sex or porn addict, but don’t identify with having uncomfortable feelings and emotions that you want to avoid, you are either not an addict or you act out sexually to such an extent that you simply don’t feel them anymore.

A definition of sex addiction is the continuing of acting out sexually, despite experiencing negative consequences. These consequences could be being late for work or taking sick days because you want to stay at home to watch porn. Or it could be the threat of your relationship breaking down or being caught doing something illegal.

If any of these things have happened to you, even though you have promised to stop, you very likely have a problem.

Typical signs of sex and porn addiction are, but not limited to:

Masturbating several times a day, sometimes even when sore

Compulsive watching of porn, often for several hours or at inappropriate times

An escalation in the explicit nature of porn because you need a new high

Feelings of loss if you can’t get access to a laptop, tablet, phone

Sexually explicit chat on online forums that you want to hide from your partner

Sexually explicit chat on online forums for several hours that distract you from other things that need done

Cruising for sex and placing yourself in high risk situations

Meeting people for anonymous sex and placing yourself in high risk situations

Paying for sex that you can’t afford

The amount of sex you are paying for has increased

All addictions stem from having experienced difficult situations that we haven’t had the tools to deal with emotionally, either because we have been too young or no one taught us how.

Sex addicts usually try to deal with things themselves, as they have not known what it is like to rely on others for help. This can often make addicts appear selfish and self-centred. The first step to recovery is reaching out for help to someone who understands and is willing to really see you and help you through this, without judgement and blame.

The cost of therapy is £45 per session. However, reductions can be made for those on low income. Please contact me to discuss a price

Regularly Asked Questions about Sex Addiction Therapy

What is sex therapy?

Sex therapy is a talking therapy, conducted by a trained therapist. I see people who are struggling with sexual and relationship problems that are either affecting a person’s self esteem, their sexual relationships or stopping them from getting into a relationship. Depending on the problem, the therapy may consist of exercises that I will ask you to do at home or it may be a deeper exploration of childhood and how that has affected you sexually, or a combination of both.

Do I have to have sex in front of someone?

Absolutely not. Psychosexual therapy is a talking therapy only, conducted by trained professionals. It is very similar to all other forms of counselling, the only difference is that the problem being addressed is sexual. Sex therapists are not sex workers, they are trained psychotherapists.

Will it be embarrassing?

We live in a culture that does not encourage people to talk about sex or sexual problems, although there are sexual references in every area of our daily life, including TV and other media. As a culture, we therefore tend to find talking about sex very uncomfortable and embarrassing. I am trained to talk about all aspects of sex and will to do this in a very gentle and caring manner, which really helps people to feel more able to talk about their sexual difficulties. Most people struggle with this when they first go to therapy but find that the embarrassment disappears very quickly.

Is it confidential?

All counselling session are completely confidential and this is something that therapists take very seriously. However, there may be circumstances where adhering to confidentially may not be possible, for example, if you state you are going to harm yourself or others. In most cases I will discuss that they may have to break your confidence if at all possible.

Is sex therapy effective?

Sex therapy is an effective treatment for sexual difficulties. However, it is only effective if you are willing to engage with the therapy.

Will I have to talk about or do something I don’t want to?

As I have described above, therapy may be difficult at first but pretty quickly people start to feel OK. However, there may be times when some of the homework exercises or discussions in the therapy room may move toward things you don’t feel you can address. I am very good at being able to spot when someone is struggling and will be able to help you to overcome this. Sometimes it is important to step slightly outside your comfort zone but you will be doing this with someone who has your best interest at heart and will support you through your personal journey.

If I have a sexual problem, why is it important to address it?

People with sexual problems can often feel depressed, lonely and isolated because of it. It can have a big impact on your relationship and sometimes relationships can end if a sexual problem persists but has been ignored. It may also be that the sexual difficulty is the result of some other underlying cause, such as heart problems or an emotional disturbance, such as anxiety or depression. It is important to not suffer in silence when you have a sexual problem, as most things can be addressed and it may be that you are experiencing another problem that can equally be rectified. As humans, we are all looking for connection and one of the most effective ways to feel connected to people we love is through sex. Sex is an important part of our adult lives and is great for our emotional and physical health. We all deserve a healthy sex life, so do something loving for yourself and make contact today for an informal chat to see how sex therapy could help you.

Who can attend sex therapy?

I will work with anyone over the age of 18. You can be single, in a relationship, polyamours, straight, bi or gay or trans. People of any religion or culture can attend for therapy and personal beliefs will always be taken into consideration. The most important thing is that you relationships and sex life can improve.

Get in touch to have a private confidential chat to see how we can help on 07731 555698

The North East sexual therapy practice that helps couples and individuals across Tyneside, Newcastle, Sunderland and Durham who are experiencing psychological, emotional and physical problems with their sex lives.