“Harry” (name changed per request) is a Patron who is trying to find himself a date and asked my advice. You, too, can become a Patron and receive priority answers to your questions!

Time to ask a question well outside of the bubble of tech, yet still incredibly important to life: geek dating. I’m sure I am not the only one out there, but I am a geek who has trouble meeting women who share common interests. I’ve tried online dating and let’s just say that’s been less than successful. All I want to do is find a common interest female geek in my area. It shouldn’t be that difficult. Any tips?

Well, it isn’t as difficult to find someone as it is to maintain a relationship.

Be yourself.

Join “real” groups; stop using dating sites.

Get involved in things that interest you.

Go to events; get out of the house.

Find others with similar interests.

And, jeez… don’t be shy about what you want. Only you know what you want, and if you don’t tell someone you might want to be with that you’re interested… they’ll never know.

“No” isn’t the end of the world. Plenty of fish in the sea.

Take heart: your problem probably has nothing to do with your self-identity as a geek, either. Plenty of geeks find suitable mates every day… and you can, too.

I don’t know where you live, but… if the pool is small, don’t expect miracles.