{Month Seven} + Thoughts on Having a Baby Away from Family

We are officially to seven months!! How? Why? What’s happening? I have had 2 people in public say, “he’s almost one year!” Whoa people, let’s slow it down – he’s still my little cuddly baby. That is one exaggeration where I’d rather people round down. I’m so excited for our future but wanting to cherish every moment that I can. Every night after Calvin eats and falls asleep, I still hold hold him on my chest for about 30 min – 1 hour (and I wonder why I have no time to do anything) but I know that these moments will be gone so quick so – IDC!

I mentioned in my Instagram yesterday that he is seRIoUsLy giving us a run for our money! He is teething, not sleeping through consistently and extremely crazy rolling everywhere. The teacher at daycare told me that he loves taking the full bin of toys and pouring it over his head. I’ve never heard a more true metaphor for my life, LOL! I’m frightened for when he full on crawls, walks and then runs. #notready

In Month 7, I am officially feeling the stress of having a baby while living far away from the help of any and all family. {We do have friends here, but coincidentally (in a positive way) they all have babies or are pregnant themselves!} The first few months were great while I was on maternity leave and I had all the time in the world to focus on Calvin, while still getting personal items taken care of. Months 4-7 have been a bit of a different story. I’ve shared my working mom woes, but I think I have realized why the past few months have felt so challenging and straining. We have no help or moments of “relief.” It hit me like a ton of bricks this past weekend.

For a while I think I thought we were invincible and that we could do anything we set our minds to – which we can, BUT it would be better with people to help. Do a lot of people successfully raise their children away from family? Yes, and we are successfully doing it too, but it really is much harder. Our personal endeavors are very few and far between – and our time for each other is limited. Legit, I sometimes struggle finding time to shower. I am exhausted at night and he’s up between 5-6am each morning. Even if we only get “behind” on life a bit each week, it starts to add up. Before we know it, we have 6 bins of laundry waiting to be folded (we have to re-dry things like 3 times or they’re wrinkly as shit), I haven’t worked out in 2 months (more on this later), we’ve eaten dinner “out” 4 days in a row, and it looks like Hurricane Katrina has gone through our living room. While I know that this stage of our lives is short and fleeting – it is still extremely overwhelming and unlike anything I have experienced in the past.

All I want are mom-made casseroles and cookies on demand, and someone to do all my household ‘chores’ -is that too much to ask?

In true fashion to my writings, I want to also talk about the positives we have experienced while on our little Cantor family adventure away from home. While it’s been challenging, there has been no shortage of amazing moments that we are extremely grateful for.

*Craig, Calvin and I have become so much closer because of this. Even though Calvin doesn’t know it yet, I think he will be proud of the fact that we took a chance on moving away, getting out of our comfort zone, and then overcoming to provide as much love as we can to him in his early stages of life.

*We have learned to do everything on our own through trial and error – the best form of learning.

*When we DO have help, it’s such a blessing. Something we might have overlooked or expected while living close.

*This is only preparing us for our future and the challenges we may face with more than one child. Yes, we plan on sibling(s) for little Cal.

*Because this area is very full of “transplants”, three of our best couple friends are also going through the same thing – having new babies far away from family.

*Calvin goes with us everywhere and has become Mr. Social Butterfly. He’s so good when we get him out of the house!

Calvin Updates

Likes:

Not sleeping all night

Waking up early

Showering himself in toys

Bath time

Being tickled

Holding Mom’s cell phone

Eskimo Kisses

Toys that rattle

Soft blankets

Rolling everywhere!

Riding on Dad’s shoulders

Dislikes:

When Mom leaves the room

Chunky baby food

Sleeping in

Naps

Getting his face wiped off

Being constrained in any way

7 month photo update:

Who else lives away from family and is feeling some of these challenges? I definitely want to connect – feel free to send me a message in any way 🙂

Stay tuned this week – I’ll be talking about one of my favorite new, quick, easy to watch, relatable shows and hosting a giveaway along with it!

2 Comments

Same here! We live in Amsterdam, Holland, my family lives back Switzerland. My husband’s family lives in another part of the country. His mom passes a few years ago. I’m sure she would have been a great help. I envy people arond us who get to have couple weekends every once in a while while their kids are in the safe hands of their parents.. Luckily, my mom comes to visit regularly, but it’s not the same as having her closeby.

I never realize how much help we don’t have UNTIL we have help for a bit! Agreed- It would be so nice to have a few hours on the weekend to get some stuff done or relax! You’re doing great, keep it up 💕