The Liberal Coalition

Just the stats

5 entries categorized "Satire"

Thursday, 11 January 2007

It appears that the Virgin Ben didn't get the memo about how we're all supposed to be bipartisan nowadays. I'm not going to dignify the low misogynistic slur he uttered about the Speaker of the House by repeating it, but suffice it to say it's a lot easier to understand why he's a law student and still can't get any.

But you must run (do not walk, run!) to see Shakespeare's Sister take down the little prick. WARNING: Before clicking on the following link, put down any beverages or food items. Chew and/or swallow, as necessary. Otherwise, I'm not responsible for what happens to your monitor. And it might be wise not to click on this link if you're reading this on a computer in a public place where people are going to look at you strangely if you suddenly burst into uncontrollable, maniacal laughter. And if you have a tendency to let loose a little when you laugh, you might want to pay a visit to the little girls'/boys' room before clicking on this link.

Friday, 03 November 2006

That's the message the Shrubbery would like voters to take with them into the voting booths next Tuesday. And to a certain extent, they're right. There really is a party that voters should be quaking in their boots at the thought of their hands on the levers of power.

But it's the Republicans we should be afraid of, not their Democratic opponents. We already know how the Republicans have raped, pillaged, and otherwise violated the Constitution, international treaty obligations, human rights, the environment, and truth, justice, and the American Way. We're not facing a defeat in Iraq when the Democrats win next Tuesday, nor even when we retake Congress next January. As everyone except Bush and the happy-freaks who seem to surround him and keep from him every scrap of news that could blight his beautiful mind knows, defeat in Iraq has already happened. What we're seeing now is the decapitated chicken (that's us, by the by) flopping around reflexively until the body finally wakes up to the fact that there's no longer a head attached to it.

And who's to blame for that sorry state of affairs? Sure as hell isn't the Democrats--we've been shut out of control of Congress and the Executive Branch for the last six years. We have a hard time getting a meeting room on Capitol Hill, much less getting any part of our legislative agenda on the calendar.

So I'm offering this graphic reminder of whom we should fear--and why. It's adapted from a 1918 military propaganda poster. The caption reads "What is the effect of Bushevism on the people?"

Friday, 18 November 2005

Congressman Murtha is a respected veteran and politician who has a record of supporting a strong America. So it is baffling that he is endorsing the policy positions of Michael Moore and the extreme liberal wing of the Democratic party. The eve of an historic democratic election in Iraq is not the time to surrender to the terrorists. After seeing his statement, we remain baffled -- nowhere does he explain how retreating from Iraq makes America safer.

Well, two can play at that game, McStupid. Here's what you should have said from that podium a couple of years back:

Vice President Cheney is a money-grubbing blowhard who has a long and undistinguished record of having "other priorities" when it came to the service of his country in Vietnam. So it is baffling that he is endorsing the highly questionable policy positions of Paul Wolfowitz and the extreme chickenhawk wing of the Project for a New American Century. The aftermath of an historic and unprecedented terrorist attack on this nation is not carte blanche for the vice president and his coterie of unindicted co-conspirators to demonstrate to their fulminating base their "Rambo" props by dragging this nation into a war for which it is not prepared and which has neither any clear strategic goal nor any justificatory basis in international law. After seeing his statement, we remain baffled -- nowhere does he explain how invading Iraq makes America safer.