Thursday, March 22, 2007

It's good to know that there's been progress in the last three hundred years. Back in 1729, Jonathan Swift lamented the fact

that a boy or a girl before twelve years old is no salable commodity.

But now Texas state Senator Dan Patrick has shown that where there's a will, American ingenuity will always find a way.

Patrick (R, as if you needed to ask--after all, they're the party of the free market and good strong capitalist values) is proposing a bill that would pay women $500 for their babies.

SB 1567 proposes to create an "Adoption Incentive Program" which would give

a $500 payment to each woman who is a resident of this state and a citizen of the United States who places a child for adoption rather than have an abortion.

Once you get over the "did they just say pay women for putting their children up for adoption?" shocker, the practical--and, sadly, probable--reasons this won't pass start to come into focus. Obviously--obviously--the state of Texas doesn't want to just throw money around! And certainly not to birth mothers. So the money is only for women who place babies for adoption instead of abortion. But how would you ensure that? Obviously women who put babies up for adoption are unreliable sorts--they might just lie and say that they had chosen adoption instead of abortion in order to get the money. So the bill goes on to declare that

The department may only distribute the application forms to abortion providers.

So you're pregnant, you decide you cannot keep this pregnancy, you make an appointment with an abortion provider and you show up and there's a parental consent law (if you're under 18) and a mandatory 24-hour waiting period just to make sure you've thought about this, missy, and now they're also going to try one last ditch oh, hey, but would you reconsider if we offered you $500?

Honey, $500 isn't even going to pay for the extra groceries you'll eat during a pregnancy. Let alone the prenatal care, if you're not insured or on Medicaid, or the cost of the birth.

Senator Patrick, would you agree to take care of a neighbor's dog for nine months for a measly $500? Where the fuck do you get the balls to offer women $500 to rent out their uteruses and sell their children?

money to burn?

Or, if your money is burning a hole in your pocket, here's Bitch PhD'sAmazon Wish List
(If you'd rather send swag to LeBlanc or Sybil or Ding or Taddy, email them and bug them about setting up their own begging baskets.)