Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Wizlocks

Attempting to elude assassins and old age, Mologon the Magician decided to clone himself. Although he was a potent wizard, he was an utter novice at cloning. His creations spilled from the vats, spitting spells and afterbirth, and strangled Mologon with their own umbilical cords.

Creating creatures is simple, as any wizard will tell you. Creating creatures that you can control is very difficult, and this is where Mologon failed. But creating creatures that can breed true is much more difficult, and so it is very surprising that he succeeded there.

Wizlocks are born from spherical eggs. They resemble crystal balls filled with a thick mist, or perhaps miso soup made from milk and glitter. They procreate asexually, with each adult wizlock laying 2-3 eggs a year, during full moons.

Since there is no genetic recombination, and since the genetics of wizlocks are so unstable, they each inherit the mutations of their ancestors. Each generation they get weirder, and farther from their progenitor.

They resemble Mologon himself. . . except with mutations. Although they have genius IQ, they are too distracted and insane to ever actually put it to good use. The only thing they use their great intellect for is debating minutia (such as who pooped in the bread basket, and the forensic methods by which it could be determined) and critiquing PC spell-casting.

They are shattered echoes of a great wizard. Like what dementia leaves behind after it devours another hero. They're half the height of a human, so that we can kill lots of them without feeling bad.

They desire the trappings of wizardry, but they have forgotten their functionality.

One of their number who has been bullied into playing the part of the demon. He's been painted red and has had horns affixed to his head. He'll run around yelling "Evil! Rape! Doom!" in the demonic tongue, attacking PCs and fellow wizlocks both.

Scrolls written in cyphers, obscure languages, and bizarre dialects. The actual content involves stupid stories, e.g. "Moop and Moopy fall in love and have all the babies, chapter 1 the sequel".

1d3 actual scrolls or potions.

What's interesting about this tribe of wizlocks?

Have smaller wizlocks on leashes.

Two-headed. Harder to sneak up on.

Just a head. Movement halved.

Macrocephalic. Psi blast (as mind flayer) for 3d6 damage.

Deformed skull shaped like a wizard hat. Not actually wearing a wizard hat.

Centauroid, made from a human top and a black cat bottom. +50% speed.

Octopoid, with a human head atop an eight-branched superbeard.

Amorphous. Add up all of the wizlocks in the encounter and smoosh them together into a big, roiling, yammering blob.

Wizlock
Number appearing: 2d6
HD 1
AC as unarmored
Attacks tiny daggers (1d4)
speed as human
Morale 6
*Each tribe of wizlocks has a different spell or ability. Each of them can cast it once per HD.