Friday, June 10, 2011

What is crazy is that people who allow torture, will go to the greatest lengths and make excuses and claim it never happened.

They know the oppressed party will believe the torture, but they give a second story to everyone else, to keep them from getting support or being held accountable.

That's what has happened to me and my son in the U.S.

I have people who say I sound crazy and that there are "no marks" and there are so many ways to torture someone without even leaving marks. It is called "white" torture or "clean" torture. How ironic, that when I was falsly arrested, again, this time they took items from me and it was only what I had on my person. Among the small items I had with me was a bar of soap with just the words "Clean". Of course, it means clean in the traditional sense, but for me, it has more than one meaning. I never thought about it at the time, not until this moment.

But the idea came to me now, that my arrival to the Knoxville detention center was no more "secretive" than the double meaning on the bar of soap.

Panetta even claims our challenges in the "blizzard war" are with technology and yet here, in the U.S., my son and I are tortured and abused systematically and while one oppressed group believes in me, and my torturers, know it's real, they have tried to keep the general public and other countries, from believing me.

There are law enforcement and church members who have contributed to the torture of me and my son.

I called every single refugee center in this area, and they all either turned me away or mocked me. Some of them maliciously mocked me.

I have gone to police over and over and been mocked and oppressed and then come to realize some of them are in on it and have faciliatated the torture and use of me and my son.

What I have realized, is that the U.S. will allow and encourage torture and use of its own children (it's not common but more rare...in fact, you're even designated as "special").

The U.S. will go in and use Protestants to fight Catholic crusades. They will use Protestants to fight Catholic crusades within the U.S. and outside of the U.S.

Why do you think we pay attention to "torture" in other countries, but not in the U.S.?

It's because the U.S. can pull up photos and stories of kids being tortured as an excuse to invade or assist some political process that is deemed to be someone's best interest. It may not be in the best interest of the U.S. and population-at-large, or military, to go in and use resources, but they will, if some group believes there will be a profit or "indulgence".

In the Middle East, they call for "jihaad" and claim grace in the next life. In the U.S., they call for religious wars and claim indulgences for their sins. How ironic that they believe committing another sin will cover for the original sins.

The Muslims extremists are no different from the Catholic U.S. extremists except that the Muslim extremists are vulnerable and the Catholic extremists run the U.S. government and intel. The Catholic extremists in the U.S. and worldwide have more power than any other extremist group, and they get away with torturing and persecuting others because of their resources and power. Which is why we scratch our heads at all these laws for profiling Muslims, based on their religion or culture, but would never do this to the Catholics.

The Founding Fathers of the United States had very realistic fears which have come to pass:

1. That Catholics had conflicts of interest in allegiance to serve country and all citizens equally, and in serving the Vatican and their fellow Catholics with preference.2. That the Jewish had conflicts of interest in allegiance to serve country and all citizens equally, and in serving Israel and fellow Jews with preference.

I am not saying there are not Protestants to make one sick to their stomach, because I've met more than I ever wanted to. However, those who are picking and choosing which media we watch and what to believe with stories in files of people housed by the CIA and FBI, are Catholic and some Jewish as well. The Protestants seem to be the dumb oaf muscle that can be called upon and easily bribed.

And even though my problems are with one group more than another, it is still true that I still have empathy for the Catholic prisoner in a Protestant jail being tortured, just as much as any other. I have had some Protestants think they might get away with something because they imagine I favor and protect those who are Protestant. I don't believe in protecting anyone doing evil, who is just sadistic, no matter what their religion is.

I have thought and thought, "Is it right for me to think there are conflicts of interest? why do I think this and is it reasonable? How does this same idea apply or not apply to Protestants?"

I don't know very much about politics. I never studied politics and I don't even know exactly if I'm Republican? or Democratic? or Independent and I thought I was Independent until I discovered there is a set description of what "Independents" believe. I had thought "Independent" meant truly independent. But no, someone decided to claim Independent is for a specific ideology. All I know, is that as a victim of torture and persecution, and seeing this continue to happen to my son, I have recently had a few ideas come to my mind about sovereignty of countries and States, and about rights to free will and the need for everyone, no matter what they believe, to have "a place" to "call home". Not that it's perfect, but sometimes, I think, the "melting pot" doesn't work. Not when it becomes an excuse to compromise on principles. I believe in tolerance of others, but I don't think it's possible to have all of the laws and culture that will make everyone happy and honor their beliefs.

What makes Catholicism or Judeaism a conflict of interest in U.S. politics?

The Catholic Church owns and has it's own country--The Vatican. They are card-carrying members of the UN and other political processes and are founded on religion alone. It is an entirely Catholic State/country and as a religious church, they have more voting and ballot power by claiming land for themselves and stating they are not just a church but a country.

There is no "Methodist" country that is the Methodist church and headquarters for the Methodists, that went out, bought land, created borders and entered the UN and all political processes by claiming for their own church "statehood".

Wouldn't we begin to wonder what the Methodists were up to if they used all their monies and resources to buy up some islands and form a new country and let all the Methodists in the U.S. know that they were not only their own country, but the Headquarters for the Methodist church worldwide? Guess what guys? We just bought a major seat in international affairs. We are the hub! So now, Methodists worldwide can bring all the intelligence they gather in other countries, to our Headquarters in our newly developed COUNTRY and our CHURCH will prosper, thanks be to God.

I thought The United States was FOUNDED with the idea of separation of church and state and yet all of the people at the top now are those who have specific conflicts of interest which make it impossible for them to serve the U.S. population without preference and bias.

Let's imagine, since we're so numb to the way things are now, that we pick out an organization that is like a church but is not a church. The FBI.

Let's say the FBI decides to move their "Headquarters" from Washington D.C., to...an entirely new location and claims statehood for themselves. The FBI takes over a section of land in Alaska and it splits off and becomes its own country. They give themselves every right that a country has and has a seat in the UN and in international affairs. They still keep their offices in the U.S. but have their hub and Headquarters outside of the U.S. It has formed its very own country. Let's give them some symbols. They can have the Lemon Tree for their state tree. The stork for their National Bird. Their flag is solid white with red splattered across it and then mustard splattered across it. It has "Heinz" printed on the back in a small corner with JK next to it. I mean, who cares what the symbols look like, they have their own country.

Now, do you think, now that the FBI IS a COUNTRY and all offices in the U.S. have their headquarters in this other country, do you think it has some pretty shady conflicts of interest?

Why are we SO incredibly STUPID?

Sure, the FBI has a top office or headquarters for the U.S. region in Washington D.C. still, but the overarching authority, that they must swear allegiance to, is in the country of FBI. People live in the country of FBI. Retired FBI goes there, if they want, and there is a "right of return" to any family member that has FBI heritage all the way to the 3rd and 4th generation. In the country of FBI they promote laws to protect FBI members and FBI members pay 10% of their income or more, to the FBI to promote FBI values and philosophies. People from the U.S. and worldwide, who are FBI members, make donations to the Country of FBI (COFBI). They become rich. Then, FBI members in the U.S. obtain seats on The Supreme Court. WHOA! We wake up one day and think, "What the hell is going on? Who snuck in the fuckin' Trojan Horse?" We weren't supposed to notice that all the people coming up the ladder are members of the FBI, giving preference to other families and members and friends of the FBI. We look at the scoreboard of the Supreme Court, as mute and dumb audiences, we the subjects, staring at the placards next to the Judges lining the bar of the Supreme Court and its':

John--FBI, Cathy--FBI, Crystal--FBI, Mark--FBI, Jane--non-FBI, Damien--FBI, Jane--non-FBI, Sarah--FBI. The 2 Janes are twins and sponsored by another country--CIA. COCIA is smaller but extremely resourceful and powerful in it's own way. They have their own country and it's not the U.S. It's the Country of CIA.

Everyone on the entire bench is FBI. Two are not FBI but they lunch and share offices with the FBI. They are CIA. and they back eachother. They're not independent.

The general population is not FBI. But everyone ruling over us is FBI, and the FBI even have their own country, COFBI. We take our cases to the courts and to the police and the state workers at even the local level and get nowhere. Our kids are being tortured and we get nowhere. We are persecuted further. We are thrown into COFBI jails who are afraid of the COFBI power and who have members of COFBI working there.

Then we look at the head of the beast. At the top, the FBI is in control and the FBI does not even have their allegiance to the U.S. but to the Country of FBI, COFBI, which is where all their money and resources go.

There is a perpetual flow of money between the U.S. COFBI members and COFBI just as their is a perpetual flow of tears among those oppressed by members of COFBI.

All of a sudden, COFBI is taking seats as Vice President, CIA head, FBI public corruption head, advisors, almost all the seats of the Supreme Court.

For the tortured, and persecuted, they are pushed and pressured to marry into the COFBI or convert, or die. We try to fight public corruption but get nowhere. Why? Look at who the person in charge of public corruption is. Oh, a member of COFBI and he's supposed to investigate his fellow member of COFBI? Will he do this or will he protect corrupt COFBI? The man in charge of Investigation of Public Corruption isn't going to take on a case that exposes infiltration and public corruption by the COFBI against a non-COFBI member.

Now let's bring in matters of personal salvation and the afterlife and indugences.

It would behoooove you, COFBI members, for your personal salvation and access to paradise in the life ever after, to remain on good terms with your Mother and Protector.

Don't forget COFBI or COFBI might just forget about you and your family. If you return to Mother COFBI, you can be assured your soul is safe and that your life here on earth as well as your life in the one to come, will be happier and preserved from eternal damnation.

Those who attempt to expose any sin of COFBI must be eradicated. Those detractors who call themselves Activists for Justice, for the general public and all non-COFBI members, are a real and present danger to the activities of COFBI. Their stories and reports weaken our funding. They are getting in the way.

The best solution is one that is clean and indetectable. You are now commissioned to torture and discredit any whistleblower who you believe is undermining the authority and objectives of COFBI and COCIA.

Who is THIS? Who is she, announcing to everyone that we have conflicts of interest and have our headquarters in a country that is not the U.S.? You are assigned to get rid of any and all threat to our agencies and countries. The country of CIA, COCIA, is agreed with those of us from COFBI, that our respective countries will be best served through a joint alliance to keep us in power and keep those who are questioning us, from influencing the public.

This means you are to arrest, detain, medicate, abuse, sexually assault, demoralize, and otherwise defame anyone who is deemed to be a threat to our objectives. Keep the family out of money and any personal reserves or resources. Do whatever it takes, but make it look legitimate or we will be in worse shape than before.

The argument Catholics and Jews make is that they do not have any conflicts of interest or allegiance to their mother countries. Are we so incredibly stupid, that after 100 years of U.S. statehood we have gone from being wise and cautious to just plain stupid? I mean, who put the veil back over our eyes and blinded us? While the public forgot about dangers of conflict of interest, they wonder why things are in the shape they're in.

I have wondered, well, how is Protestantism different? why would Protestants not have a confict of interest? And the answer is that there is no country in the world that is both a CHURCH and COUNTRY for Protestantism. Protestants are incredibly diverse and don't even agree on the same things. We killed eachother, left eachother, fought eachother, and believed in different things. We have so many different branches of faith: Methodist, Baptist, Lutheran, Evangelical, Assembly of God, Presbyterian, etc...and not ONE of them has its own COUNTRY to sponsor their church. Which is why we tend to be more tolerant of other faiths as well. We know how it feels to be persecuted because we were attacked by both The Roman Catholic Church (which will always want to have a supremacy, majority, and monopoly without defectors) and Jews.

There is no Country of The Presybterian Church, Country of Headquarters for Baptist, Country of Methodist Church, Country of Assemblies of God.

What we did, was stupidly assume others would be as tolerant of us as we were of them, and we dropped the guard and forgot every smart thing that our Fathers taught us. We had people pressure us and say, "You're a bigot. Don't discriminate." And they wanted everyone to forget what a conflict of interest is when it is a Real and Present Danger.

There is no place in American politics and leadership, for those who have two competing allegiances of church and country. It is fundamentally wrong to have leaders who are Catholic or Jewish when the headquarters for their faith and church have their own country. You cannot serve 2 masters at the same time.

America was founded by a group of Protestants, agnostics, and ragamuffins who were escaping monopolistic practices and religious persecution. None of the Protestants commanded others to follow their particular branch of beliefs, which is what democracy is about. They said this would be a christian nation and under God, but tolerant of others. They demanded separation of church and state to protect the rights of others, which meant they were NOT making America a country that was subject to ONE specific church.

There were laws against allowing Catholics to be political leaders, not because we were bigots, but because we already knew the Vatican is it's own country. One cannot be a member of Roman Catholicism (Vatican) and serve the United States without conflicts of interest and partiality at the same time. We don't allow people who are citizens of one country to be leaders of our own country unless they revoke their citizenship. We do not allow for "dual citizenship" and political office in the U.S. Especially not in the upper levels of office.

Some of our laws about not allowing for dual citizenship and not allowing Catholics into political office (not to say they couldn't live here without persecution), were specifically to prevent conflict of interest and completing allegiances. You cannot serve the KGB and the FBI at the same without being called a "double agent". And one cannot serve the U.S. and the Vatican without being called a "double agent." If one is Catholic, their boss is the Vatican.

It is impossible to have 2 masters.

However, the double agents have deluded us and blinded us while they have been climbing the knots on the rope to get more of their agents to the top.

How curious that all of the current members of The Supreme Court are double agents. 3/4 are members of both The Roman Catholic Church with their allegiance to 1 country, The Vatican, and allegiance to the U.S. The others are doubly married to Israel and the U.S.

Which is fairly representative of what kind of structure is leading this country.

We believe in separation of church and state but Catholics don't. They do not even agree to this philosophy and never have. They have always believed the Pope was the speaker of God and belonging to the Roman Catholic Church makes you a card-carrying member of The Vatican and the benefits that come from the Vatican.

We would not say "Catholics shouldn't be politicians for the U.S" if they did not already have their own Country.

My son was taken from me by members of another country--The Vatican, and Israel, and they have used their members and others who support other countries, in intelligence, law enforcement to torture me and my son and slander me in FBI, military, and CIA files. And unfortunately, most of our leaders are double agents and have serious conflicts of interest which the public and Protestants have been asked to ignore.

My son and I were tortured when I first started questioning this hierarachy and what was going on. The same group that vandalized my cars and stole from me and tortured me and my son are those who have feared and hated me for bringing up these truths. They don't want anything to change, so keeping people stupid is the best way to do that. Torturing me and my son and my family, is just to discredit me so others don't believe the criminal things that have been done to us.

Everyone should have their own country. If Catholics want to be politicians and in the Judges, they should move back to their country, The Vatican. Why do we have Vatican squatters on the Supreme Court? Why do we have a Vatican squatter for Vice President of the U.S? Why are we thinking of putting a Vatican squatter at the HEAD of our county's MILITARY? Who is he going to fight for? The U.S? Right. The Vatican. If you put a Vatican squatter into a Pentagon seat, expect the continuation of a Crusade.

And if the U.S. has ceased to be a country that protects those who protest and cry out for liberty for all, then it might be time to either take back the country or form a country for Protestants. Forming a country that combines religion and country has always gone against the Protestant grain, or Puritan grain. This country has its leadership run by 2 other countries:

The VaticanIsrael

The U.S. is completely and TOTALLY off mark and off of it's axis.

Get the double agents out of the house.

And having Kate Middleton marry into the English royal family wasn't a political move? While me and my brother were fired on the same day and have been hounded and my family persecuted?

I have a yearbook with my face next to a Carole who is unwrapping presents. It's from my senior year, the same year someone started trying to run me off of the road and kill me.

Someone just sent a copy to me yesterday. I looked at my senior class photo and it was centered alongside this larger photo of a woman named Carole who is unwrapping gifts from a secret admirer. Then I get raped by a Jew a few years later and I'm given a counselor who is Catholic (I think) and goes by the name of Carol.

I'm sure there have been no prophecies and concerns about me. I'm just sure.

The teacher who was in charge of Yearbook was, I believe, Mrs. McCusker. Nancy McCusker. She was in charge of Yearbook and student newspaper. I don't know recall which students were in charge of lay-out for Yearbook that year, but it wouldn't be hard to figure out. The layout would have gone to the student with layout duties or the teacher in charge.

This is getting weirder and weirder, if you ask me. It was that same year that I was run off the road in the middle of the night, and drove the car up the tree. I have always thought it was very strange, because of the manner of the car approaching. I believe the video of me singing was circulating internationally about that time as well, because it was taken my Junior year, I believe, not senior year.

What I'm thinking, is that if some "prophets" or seers are as good at predicting the future as they seem to be, and didn't like what was coming up, might they attempt to rearrange things or get rid of me?

Kate Middleton would have been 10 years old. William was maybe 13? Harry 10? I don't know how old Carol was. Diana was killed 3 years later. I wonder when it was that Diana first began her affairs with the Muslim men. I'm sure it was by 1993. Just a hunch. There were no Carols in my life. No Caroline or Carols. Just the student and I wasn't close with her. I liked her fine but we weren't friends. I think she was Catholic but I wouldn't know and didn't keep track then either. I assumed I had no enemies.

Diana's relationship with Hasnat was in 1995. Before that I think she dated a Pakistani cricket player.

Maybe get rid of Diana and move in someone more "acceptable" to William's eye. Possibly, those she was getting close to in the early 90s were not people that some felt were in the best interests of their own country(ies). Begin grooming woman to replace Di. Get rid of possible future contenders or those who were predicted might draw attention in some way, and start paving the way for someone to attract the next up.

I want to know if it's Catholic or Jewish connection or both.

If I have people torturing me and my son and all over my you-know-what to the point of predicting where I will go, what I will do, and what color my pee will be next time I'm at the toilet, I am very certain someone knew about me in 1992, or by 1992. And in 1992, someone decided I would be a future threat.

And thanks to God, I sense very good energy and confirmation in my spirit, at this time, that I am correct. It is 11:21 a.m. and I wrote this and felt an immediate confirmation. I don't know the details, but I know intuivitely that it is true.

I, in the meantime, knew nothing about any of them or even paid attention to popular news. I had my nose stuck in books, was playing outdoors, and we didn't even watch television except to see movies. I never heard about Princess Diana news and I didn't care at all until about a decade after she died.

I wonder when Party Pieces got their sponsorship.

Hmm, I don't know when they got their sponsorship, but it was started in 1987, according to an interview. According to a timeline that I just pulled up, "strains in Diana's marriage were becoming apparent to the public." by 1986.

I think William married the fucking enemy.

He was 4 years old when "strains in the marriage became apparent" and 5 years old when Carol "got the idea" to start a company for hostessing parties.

It was in 1984 that Harry was born and that was supposed to have been a decent time for Diana, that pregnancy but things weren't great or she wouldn't have been making suicide attempts all the way back to 1981 or whenever she was pregnant with William. Things only became noticeably worse, to the public eye, in 1996, the timeline indicates.

They were both 5 years old, Kate and William, when Kate's mother got the spontaneous idea to start up a party company. Someone may have had a plan all the way back to 1987. A plan which was not to be disturbed and one to kill over, in the long run.

My ring for wedding my fiance was marked with 5 tiny stones. Both of them, 5 tiny stones each, his ring and my ring. And I had someone trying to put me in federal prison for life too, attempting to work out a marriage fraud deal.

I think William married into a family sponsored by enemies of his own mother.

This is the first time I've even looked up stuff about this family but I'm looking now, and her parents were stationed in Jordan (the Middle East), from 1984-1987. Sort of strange. So, it's not like they have any middle eastern interest or connections, is it?

This is a political family, not a generic "commoners" hostessing family. They are not just social climbers, they are connected to politicians and engaged in political affairs. They set up their new business in the hostessing industry right after they returned from Amman, Jordan. The Middle East. When asked why she started the business, Carols answer to the interviewer is, "I was a full time mom, and..." which is not exactly true. She wasn't a full-time mom or a stay-at-home mom. She had shipped her children off to nursery schools from the time they were born and then later even sent her own daughter to a boarding school. She didn't have a personal interest in parties or in selling partyware. She also didn't start the business because "I was a full-time mom". She started the business because she already had an eye on the prize.

And most likely, there was already at that time, some kind of sponsorship. According to the wikipedia, Kate Middleton was a resident of Jordan (the Middle East) from 1984-1987. She lived there until 1987 and then all of sudden, the grand plan for a party company was implemented when back in England, in 1987, that same year. When they got back to England, while Carol started up her company, she shipped her kids to various nurseries and schools, sending Kate to St. Andrews (I guess, an elementary school).

Out of all the media coverage and bylines and things I passed by, no one ever thought it important to mention a few of these things? It's almost unreal.

At any rate, there is something possibly suspicious about the layout of the yearbook and who arranged it.

Not only that, but all of my yearbooks and brother's yearbooks were stolen, so I haven't been able to look at them for years. They started disappearing in 1993-1997 because I remember wondering what was happening with all my yearbooks. I found a couple of them at my brother's house, where he lived with his wife Carman but I didn't imagine he'd just taken them. Then, he was missing them, and didn't know where they had gone to. Many things just disappeared.

It might not have had anything to do with McCusker but with one of the students. The editor that year was a friend (I think), Alicia Peters. I'm not positive, but I think so. But whoever put them together had to be both a photographer for the yearbook, and on the yearbook team that year. I actually, this is really weird, but I believe I remember the day that I was shown this layout before it was ever printed. I remember someone wanting me to see it and I also recall that they were trying to keep me from having the photo I chose for myself, used for my Senior photo. I didn't know why. Someone said, "It looks like you're making a gang sign." I said, "What?" (everyone knew I wasn't in any 'gang') and they said, "The way your fingers are." I thought it was really strange and said, "No, that's the one I want" and they used it but I remember they were wanting me to see the other photo next to it.

I will try to upload a copy of it at some point.

I think some of the photographers were James Meckleson, Katie, and ? would have to remember them all. Katie sent me this huge bouquet of flowers when I almost died in a car wreck that came up next, where my neck was broken. It was only 2 years later that I almost died and I remember I thought it was so nice of Katie to send flowers when some of the people I thought would send flowers, like The Bechtolds, never did. I remember James Meckleson (or Mickleson) and that he was always taking photos for the yearbook and school paper, and events, and he had told me he got a nearly perfect score on LSATs but didn't go. Maybe it was SATs. They thought he had cheated through the whole thing but he didn't and was just an average student.

I think I just found him. Maybe. I didn't know his first name was Alex but it might be. There is a listing for an Alex James Mickleson who is licensed to practice law in the State of Oregon. I still am not sure which photographer took the photo and put it in the lay-out.

I know that my Junior year, 1991-1992, was great and then I was crowned Homecoming Queen and had some video of me singing shipped out internationally and then everything changed. There was some jealousy.

I found a James Mickleson talking about infrared on a photography site and it sounds like him. He wasn't just slightly into photography--he was in the dark room with me all the time. That's how I knew him, from art and photography and we did our own developing of the film, from start to finish, in the Art Photo classes I took. I put the link above. I need to put the link to the Syrian child torture case in the link space too. Because that's why I first started writing this post.The James I know was very tall and thin and wore a black trenchcoat and always carried a camera. He was white or had some Native American or something ethnic, dark hair, and wrote poetry.

I sort of think it was maybe a woman though, just not sure yet.

People have all kinds of crazy motives for torturing others. If they go so far as to kill someone, they might do more things that are noticeable so it's hard to miss, because they're sending a message. If they want the people to live but just want certain groups to get the message, they're going to do clean torture. And that's what has happened to me and my son.

Oh, I found it. I was spelling it wrong. It's James Mekkleson. I found it on an Alumni page. I have this vague idea that he was from Chicago originally and moved to Oregon later. But I don't remember. I found a listing of him commenting on an article, "liked it" about Oregon native turtles. Him and a mohammed madari Yasor. It's in relation to a photo contest, and yes, he was always into photography.

1993 was also the year I had my paintings stolen from the school and some of my poetry too. I made a painting of a sunflower next to water (clytie) and one of a vase with a string of pearls, and they were all taken.

I remember meeting a woman from Jordan shortly before I was raped in 1998. I remember her because most of the students I tutored at the tutoring center were from Saudi Arabia, U.A.E., Iraq, and Iran. They were all great, I mean in general, usually had a lot to joke around about (situational life humor). I remember a woman from Jordan coming around to check me out and then disappearing and I never tutored her. I also remember, though, a woman from Lebanon as well. I remember because I said something about her blue eyes and she said that's how a lot of people in Jordan were. She was very pretty, beautiful in fact, dark hair that was a little longer than shoulder length and wavy or straight, 5'6'' or so, petite, with bright blue eyes.

About Me

this is a blog about my life and thoughts on: clergy abuse (Mt. Angel Abbey); defamation by press (Willamette Week); freedom of speech; abuse of government powers; religion, and other social issues; and the art & humor in routine life; and is dedicated to my son