Late-Night Laughs

Enjoy some good one-liners and bits from your favorite late-night comedians.

Leno Laughs

Feb 09, 2009

Jay Leno: "I think Barack Obama is a genius. I think this is part of the plan. Do you ever notice when Barack Obama nominates someone, the first thing they do is pay their taxes? He's found a way to pay off the deficit. Nominate every single person in the country one at a time, until they pay" off the deficit.

Jay Leno: "As you know, Tom Daschle withdrew his name to be in Obama's cabinet, due to IRS problems. Yeah, he said, 'I will not be a distraction.' See, distraction is Washington talk for, 'Uh-oh, there's a lot more crap you don't know about yet.'"

Jay Leno: "Speaker of the House...Nancy Pelosi" recently said that "every month that we do not have an economic recovery package, '500 million Americans lose their jobs.' ... I think the Botox is starting to seep into" her "brain."

David Letterman: "Ladies and gentlemen, while you were applauding that joke, another Obama nominee dropped out."