Procreative Transportation – The Angry Vagina

An artist in Japan (Megumi Igarashi) was arrested for distributing online pictures from her vagina canoe project. The pictures are considered obscene under Japanese law. The charge for this crime could amount to a two year prison sentence. The artist describes the vagina kayak as a work of art. She feels there is a lot of anger and bad feelings about vaginas. She creates unique art products out of her vagina to help fight the anger and promote good feelings about vaginas. This is a bit unusual but generally a fun idea. Most people probably support good feelings about vaginas. No one should be angry at them.

Megumi Igarashi

The issue becomes more unusual as we consider the full scope of Japanese culture. Specifically the elaborate Japanese penis festivals where children and adults celebrate the penis with every form of penis object you can imagine. They celebrate with elaborate erotic products like hats, glasses and food shaped like and devoted to the penis. The penis festival is generally considered good family fun and would be shocking and obscene in many other countries.

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On a more basic level genital aerodynamics and procreative transportation is quite fascinating. On the one hand we have the rocket ship which is universally considered a triumph in genital based vehicle design. Everyone thinks rocket ships are cool but they look like penises. This fact makes for good humor. On the other hand one lousy vagina canoe can land you in jail. Wow no humor in that. I can see why people think we are angry with the vagina.

Chris McGrath/Getty Images

What did the vagina do to deserve this treatment? Is the vagina inferior as a vehicle design concept? Will/can vaginas become the rocket ships of the future? Better still, can we create a penis vagina rocket ship? A sort of Pengina that includes the best attributes of both. I think this is where we are headed.

Flying saucers are inherently more vaginal and womb like. The Star Trek enterprise certainly looks more like a fallopian tube with ovary jets than any sort of penis rocket. All this business about angry vaginas and penis festivals is quite unfortunate but somewhat necessary. Our beloved vagina kayak artist will help humanity begin to discover new modes of transportation like Pengina rocket ships. Captain Kirk will be replaced with the likes of Captain Bruce Jenner for an intergalactic gender bending future that will blow your mind. I am not sure if we are truly angry at the vagina. Perhaps we just need to learn how to fly one?