The realization of it hit like a ton of bricks. Then I started to worry. We'd fucked without a condom. What if I got her pregnant? She wasn't that old, my mom, she probably could still get pregnant. What if I'd knocked her up? What would we do then?

I wanted to talk to someone. But who could I turn to? None of my friends would believe me. Any shrink I talked to would probably try to send me to a psych ward. I suddenly felt alone and confused. My thoughts raced...

So... So what now? What do we do? Where would mom and I's relationship go? Would we date casually or would it get serious? Could it get serious? Could you have a serious romantic relationship with your mother?

And what if we did? What if we did have a serious relationship? How would it work? We couldn't stay here, could we? What could we do?

Maybe... Maybe we could sneak off, run away to another country, like somewhere romantic in Europe, somewhere around the Mediterranean. Maybe get married.

I thought of us as husband and wife, traveling the world. Us in France, strolling the streets of Paris, hand in hand, sitting in cafes, drinking espresso out of tiny cups, eating fancy cheese, drinking wine and fucking in the afternoons. I saw us there.

We could do that, couldn't we? Sure, we'd have to change our names, take new identities, but we could do it...

If mom was indeed pregnant, I'd have to marry her. And knew I'd certainly make a better husband to her than dad ever was. That much I knew for sure.

Getting up from the table, I did my best to compose myself, loaded my dishes into the machine, and slapped some cold water on my face. I poured a dash of whiskey into my coffee and wished mom was there so I could talk to her about everything.

At that particular moment in time, there was no one in the world I wanted to see or talk to more than her.

**********

The rest of the day I thought about mom and did housework, cleaning and scrubbing everything and I searched for jobs online. I cooked some pasta, too, late afternoon, so it would be ready for mom when she came back.

Finally, at 5:30, she got home. She looked tired. And pissed.

"Hey mom..." I said, meeting her at the door, my arms outstretched, ready to hug and kiss her hello.

"Don't you 'hey' me!" She snapped back, in a hostile tone.

"What's wrong?" I inquired, confused about her sudden change in demeanor from this morning to now.

"I've been thinking about what happened last night and this morning, too. And I'm not comfortable with it at all. I'm not comfortable with this..."

"Look, I'm sorry, mom, about last night. I just got carried away in the moment."

"Sorry is something you say about breaking a vase. It doesn't cut it when you basically date rape your mother! You acted like an out of control, horny 8th grader! This morning too! Though I'm probably just as much to blame for that one..."

"Well I don't know what to say... I feel bad. I wanted to have sex with you, mom. You're beautiful. When you were naked around me, I just lost it. I guess part of it was because it'd been a while since I'd, you know... Listen, what can I do? What can I do, mom? What can I do to make it better? To make it up to you?"

"I don't know right now. I think this whole thing, and especially my irresponsible actions this morning were totally wrong. I think they need to stop."

"No, please, no, mom. I love you. I want to be with you. There's nothing wrong with what we did. We were both lonely. We both are lonely. We're friends. We're grown up. Why not?"

"I just have a terrible feeling about the whole thing. We need to stop it. We can't ever do it again. No more."

"Is it about getting pregnant? Because I have to admit, I'm worried about that, too. We weren't exactly safe..."

"No, I'm still on the pill."

"You are? I thought you hadn't been with anyone since dad?"

"I haven't. I take it for other reasons. It keeps my monthly visitor regular, and, wait, why am I elaborating on this? It's beside the point. No more! And if you try to get too frisky again, you're out on the street!"

"But if you get naked in front of me again, it'd be hard..."

My quip and unintentional pun lightened the mood. We both laughed and I stepped forward and hugged her. She kind of cowered away but reluctantly hugged back. After we broke apart, she looked me in the eyes.

"I'm not saying it wasn't good. I just don't think it's right, what we've been doing. I don't feel comfortable with it. And I don't think we should ever mention it again, to each other, or to anyone. Christ Almighty, we're in Texas! They'd probably have us on Death Row in Huntsville if it ever reached the cops. This has to be our secret and our secret alone and can never, ever happen again."

It choked me up when I thought about it, but I guessed she was right. Besides the obvious problems with it, being where we were, the cops probably wouldn't take too kindly to me fucking my mom in the Gulf or in her kitchen or anywhere, really.

We probably should call it off, I figured, even though I definitely didn't want that.

"You're gonna be a great catch for whatever girl you finally settle down with." Mom said, cupping her hands on my face.

"Thanks, mom. I love you." I told her and noticed she was tearing up a bit. We hugged again, this time for longer, and then broke apart.

"I still need a man around here, though, just not in that way..." She told me, sniveling and wiping her runny nose with her hand.

"I'll get some tissues." I told her, spinning 180 degrees and cutting toward the living room.

"It's alright. I'll go take a shower and we'll eat." She said, her voice trailing off as she dashed away to her bedroom.

It was a lot to take in, what had just happened. My mom had sort of dumped me. But was it really dumping me?

I mean, she had a point, if anyone ever found out... But I wondered if maybe someone already had. We were loud this morning and any nosy neighbor could have easily glanced out the window last night and seen us frolicking in the water.

Though I had just been thinking she was right in wanting to call it off, the more it sunk in, the more the finality of that sunk in, the more I felt like I didn't want that. I really, really didn't want that.

And did she? I mean, hey, she didn't kick me out of the house. And she was open to some sort of physical relationship earlier. And she did have sex with me this morning. Perhaps there was a chance. I'd have to be slick about it, though. I couldn't come on to her too hard or I'd ruin it. Plus I might get thrown out of the house.

No, I had to play it cool and see what materialized. Maybe I'd again be having sex with her, or, better yet, have her as my girlfriend, because my profound disappointment in her breaking it off with me really began to enlighten me to the fact that that's what I wanted. Her to be mine. Not just in bed, but as my friend, partner, and lover.

I then realized what I probably had suppressed for a long time. I was in love. With my mom.

**********

The next two weeks flew by pretty quickly. I'd taken some part time work tending bar in Port Aransas and was doing all the housework, basically being mom's butler. But it was okay. I was glad to help her out. Plus I was getting free room and board and now saving some cash with my bar gig. Things were going okay.

I wasn't seeing mom a lot because she'd been busy working. But when I did see her, there was still a strong sexual tension between us. We'd usually hug when we saw each other, kiss hello, or even cuddle sometimes watching TV, but all that seemed to be over since those two days we'd had sex. Now, whenever I saw her, she kept her distance.

But I could still see something in her eyes. I could tell that she longed for me, like I longed for her. And she still flirted with me and would giggle at all my jokes and shoot me furtive glances. And I think she knew I was glancing back at her and that she got off on it.

For instance, one night, she came out of her room for a late night snack, wearing only a T-shirt, but with no sweatpants on, like she usually wore. Her shirt wasn't that long and only reached down to the tip of her pelvis, exposing all, and I mean all, of her white lacy cotton thong.

And it wasn't like she didn't know I was around. I was in the living room watching TV. She knew she'd walk by me on her way to the kitchen.

As she walked by she said hello with a girlish giggle. I was flat out stunned and could do nothing other than stare down at her lovely, panty covered pussy. And, as she passed, of course I checked out her ass, in all its glory, which, in that thong, looked so voluptuous, tight and firm, so picturesque, like two big balloons with a small string in between them.

She shocked me further by opening up the fridge and bending over completely to get something out of a lower compartment. Her nearly bare ass waved around high in the air, almost triumphantly.

For a woman who said she didn't want to have sex with me anymore, she sure had a funny way of going about that.

My cock stiffened and I watched her every move. I was especially aroused to see her taking out a piece of cake, dipping her finger into the icing and then sucking the icing off it. If she'd stared at me while sucking the icing, I might have lost control and just ran over and stuck it in her again.

But I held back. Perhaps she was tired and didn't realize what she was doing. Or maybe she was teasing me and getting off on it. I don't know. But after she took her cake back into her room, smiling and giggling at me as she passed, I went into my room and beat off furiously to the thought of smearing that cake all over mom's ass and tits, licking it off her, and fucking her right there on the kitchen floor.

And this started to become her routine, prancing around the house, in only a shirt and panties. And I knew she knew it drove me crazy, seeing her like this. But she kept doing it. Pretty much every night and even sometimes in the day if she was home.

I'd beat off practically every time afterward and did all I could from not pouncing on her like a lion in the Serengeti. Either she was teasing me or testing me. I couldn't figure out which, but her not-so-subtle actions gave me hope that someday I might be able to really fuck her again and not just have to beat off thinking about it.

**********

I guess with her looks it shouldn't have been surprising that a gentleman caller would soon enter into the equation. And he did. An associate of hers, a Mr. Ted Beneck.

Mom had told me that she'd be going out with someone for dinner that night, and, though I thought I might be jealous, I wasn't. I figured maybe it was good for her to go out with someone. It was probably healthier for her than getting mauled and constantly ogled by her horny son.

Though when Ted showed up that night, to our door with a bouquet of roses, I wasn't exactly thrilled, and an all-encompassing rush of jealous rage quickly overtook me, in an awesome wave.

It wasn't just that he'd shown up to take out my mom, my love interest, the last woman I'd had sex with, so I guess, sort of my ex-girlfriend. No, it was that Ted looked like a total douchebag. I couldn't believe my mom wanted to go out with him.

He was nearly fifty, tall, slim, and had a terrible comb-over that was kinda slicked back. His bad, orange spray-on tan was horrific, and his teeth were far too white. He wore a light gray suit that was probably expensive but was way over-starched and he had a shiny gold Rolex with diamonds all over it.

He also had on several gold and diamond rings and around his neck was a somewhat large platinum necklace with an enormous crucifix dangling from it.

He looked like a reject from the Sopranos, not like a guy who should be taking my beloved mother out for a date.

"How you doing, kid. Ted Beneck." He said, as I opened the door and laid distraught eyes on him. His calling me "kid" annoyed me even more than his appearance.

"Howdy..." I mustered, begrudgingly. I thought about telling him to please leave and that if he had sex with my mother, I might never be able to have sex with her again.

"So, what a place. Your mother is first class, kid." He said, stepping inside, and extending out his hand for a shake. His breath smelled overly minty. His cologne or aftershave was strong and nauseating.

I shook his hand and his grip was way too firm, almost crushing my fingers. I'm not a fan of weak shakes, either, but a firm shake like that, one that hurts, is probably worse.

I broke the shake as fast as I could. Then the douchebag started to make small talk with me, bragging about how many millions he's done in sales, outpacing everyone in his office.

Fortunately mom came out soon enough after his grand entrance that I didn't have to listen to him for too long. I might have killed him otherwise.

And when mom did come out, wow, did she ever make a grand entrance herself. Her hair was down and teased and she had on black stiletto heels, fishnet stockings, and a tight one-piece black mini. Plus she'd done up her makeup and painted her cheeks a ruby red and her eyes a stunning baby blue.

Sexy enough, too, were her black nail polish and lipstick. It gave her a dangerous, almost goth-type look I'd never seen on her, but it fucking turned me on like crazy.

Ted and I both were floored. Neither of us could really say anything. We just stared.

Ted looked over at me with a curious expression. I don't think he'd expected me to say that to my mom.

"Thanks, suge..." Mom said seductively, staring at me and not Ted, making Ted seem even more confused.

"So, uh, I'll have her home by her bedtime." Ted said uncomfortably, breaking up mom and me's stare down.

He handed her the roses and she took them in her hands and sniffed them.

"Aw, how sweet..." She said, kissing him on the cheek.

"See ya, later. Don't wait up..." She said to me, putting the roses down on the table, and taking Ted by the arm and walking him out the door. The douchebag shot me a devilish grin and wink before leaving, making me want to punch him in the face even more.

I couldn't believe my mom was going out with such an asshole. The thought of her on a date with him drove me nuts. And, worse yet, the way she dressed made me terrified of the fact that she was probably going to have sex with him tonight.

Then that unpleasant image stuck in my mind. Ted fucking my mom. That asshole putting his dick in my mother. Putting his dick where I'd put mine. Putting his dick in the place that I'd been fantasizing about putting mine in again for weeks, non-stop.

That shithead. That smarmy shithead, fucking my mother. I was aghast at the thought of him becoming her boyfriend, or, worse yet, my stepfather. Though it kind of turned me on to think of maybe having the chance to fuck my mom behind his back. Or, even better, to have him walk in on me and my mom fucking, in their bed or something. I'd love to see the look on his orange face.

I also wondered what he'd say or think if he knew that I'd fucked my mom, twice. I wonder if he'd try to kill me or would call the police. I could see him calling the police, the asshole. He was probably a pussy like that.

Once they left, I sat on the couch in the living room, watched some stupid show on TV, and swirled down quite a lot of tequila; trying to do anything I could to take my mind off it. But, not too much later, mom came home, slamming the door behind her. She was alone.

"Hey mom, how'd the, uh, dinner go?" I asked, standing up and meeting her over in the doorway. I could tell it hadn't gone well by the look on her face.

"Horrible. I don't know what I was thinking. Like I said, it seems every guy my age is either married or a total asshole. Turns out Ted was both."

"What?" I exclaimed, though not really surprised at either admission.

"Yup. We bumped into his wife at the restaurant, out with her gal pals."

"Are you kidding?"

"Nope, he wasn't even slick enough to take me to a restaurant out of the way, where he wouldn't see his wife!"

"But isn't he an associate of yours? Didn't you know him?"

"Not too well. Only met him a couple times. He said he was divorced, but, trust me, he's not. His wife saw him and slapped him. So did I right after her."

"Didn't you see a ring?"

"I saw a bunch of gaudy big gold rings on his fingers. I guess one of them was a big gaudy wedding ring."

"Dang..."

"I don't know what I even saw in him. I guess figured worse came to worst he'd be a good connection for business. But I don't need him. I do quite well on my own, as you can see..." She said, waving her arms around at her luxurious Gulfside condo.

"No, I think I went out with him more as a rebound. To get over you." She said, with puppy dog eyes staring right into the inner depths of my soul.

I didn't know what to say and was kind of drunk. I just stood there, even though it would have been a great time to make a pass at her. Here she was lonely, sad, and pissed off after a bad date. It was a perfect time to pounce. But I just stood there, saying nothing.

"Smells like you been having fun tonight, suge." She said, smelling how bad I reeked of alcohol, from several feet away, even.

"Just had a few drinks. Sorta needed them tonight." I replied nervously.

"And why's that?" She inquired with a smile.

"Was sort of jealous..."

"Of what?"

"I don't know."

"Must have been jealous of something..."

"I was."

"Then what was it?"

"I don't know if I should say."

"And why not?"

"It might get me in trouble."

"What kind of trouble?"

"Getting kicked out of this apartment trouble."

Mom shook her head, rubbed her forehead with her hand, and sighed.

"Why do things have to be so complicated?" She asked.

"I don't know. But they do, I guess." I replied.

"I don't want to think about it tonight. I just had an awful date and need some of whatever you're drinking. Let me get out of these clothes and we can slam back a few. What'd ya say?"

"Sounds good."

The thought of her getting out of those clothes sounded even better, though. And I admired her beautiful, full ass, in that tight mini, as it shook and swayed down the hallway into her bedroom. I pictured her in her bedroom, getting naked and it made me hard. I went over to the couch where I'd been sitting and threw down another shot to cool me off.

Mom came back out a few minutes later, wearing only a T-shirt and panties. This time they were black lace and not thong but close as they probably only covered a fraction of her meaty butt. She went into the kitchen and came back out with two glasses full of ice cubes.

Then she sat down beside me and crossed her legs. She still had on her makeup.

"Why do men have to be such dang pigs?" She asked, pouring herself a tall glass of tequila, straight, on the rocks.

"Even you, usually so sweet. But then you went wild on me that night, in the water... How could you do that? Attack your mom like that? Didn't it make you think twice, that I was your mom? How come you had sex with me? Especially like that..."