DUmmie FUnnies

A FUnnie look at the loony residents of the Democratic Underground aka DUmmies in particular and the Leftwing Blogosphere in general.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Brian Williams Defends Bush Interview On His Blog

Apparently Brian Williams is feeling the heat over his INTERVIEW with President Bush. In stark contrast to the normal forgettable Happy Face banalities usually posted on his Daily Nightly blog aka THE DAILY DULLY, yesterday's EDITION presented a very defensive attitude towards charges of bias by Williams. Unfortunately for Williams, the comments left by both liberal and conservative posters on his own blog undercut his weak declarations of being unbiased. In addition, the DUmmies now consider Williams to be their new hero because of the way he "hammered" Bush. So let us now watch Williams unconvincingly declare himself to be unbiased in Bolshevik Red followed by the postings of his blog commentators plus the DUmmie paens to their new hero while the commentary of your humble correspondent is in the [brackets]:

We'll run another new (to our audience) portion of our conversation with the President on tonight's broadcast. I returned from New Orleans to find thousands of emails (I often ask that they be printed out so that I can take them home, travel with them and go through them quickly, while sticking to my vow to read them all) neatly divided into two main categories: our Katrina coverage (overwhelmingly positive) and our interview with President Bush.

[[overwhelmingly negative)]

On the latter topic, I was taken aback somewhat by what seems to be the prevailing (70/30) opinion -- apparently echoed today by Rush Limbaugh -- that I was somehow "disrespectful" in the interview.

[Somehow? I would say DEFINITELY disrespectful.]

Several things here: While I don't know the President outside of the parameters my job, he has always shown me great kindness, we've always gotten on well, and when we parted company yesterday, he was of good cheer and seemed satisfied with our time together (and notably was in NO hurry to end the interview) as were members of the White House staff. My job, remember, is to report...ask questions...and serve as advocate for our viewers who don't get the chance to ask questions of the President themselves. Any charge of "disrespect" deservedly gets my attention, because of my profound respect for the office and its occupants. In fact, one of the topics of conversation any time I'm with the President is our shared interest in Presidential history -- which we discussed during some private time yesterday. I note that one viewer has written complaining of "unprofessionalism" in my "tone of questioning and facial expressions."

[Maybe we would have more faith in your professionalism if you had correctly identified the biased Michael Eric Dyson as a leftwing Bush Basher rather than leaving the impression of him as some "impartial" observer.]

Perhaps some background will help. What we aired yesterday, and will again tonight, was a rather spontaneous, strolling interview in the hot afternoon sun in New Orleans. It was to have been taped an hour later, but the President was understandably anxious to greet the people who'd been waiting for him and Mrs. Bush in the heat -- so we gladly obliged, and things got underway very suddenly. He is, as has been widely reported in this space and elsewhere, a man who truly seems to enjoy the give-and-take and verbal "combat" that often comes with good conversation. He indicated to me more than once yesterday that he was anxious to have a robust discussion. Perhaps because the backdrop and circumstances of yesterday's interview differed so much from the norm -- the conventional presidential interview we've become used to seeing -- people saw something different that struck them as negative in some way. Asking tough questions is one thing, but I am constitutionally unable to be disrespectful around the President of the United States.

[So are you blaming the perception that you were disrespectful on the heat? In any event, it is apparent that both liberal and conservative posters on your blog aren't buying your lame excuses as we shall now see...]

Great interview Brian. I almost turned the channel thinking I was going to see another jounalist pansy bowing down to King George. What I saw was an American standing up against a Moron like Bush. Maybe if there were people like you asking the tuff questions before we got in this mess we wouldn't be in this mess to begin with. The Republican days are numbered and in November we begin the process of "tossing the garbage out"

[Brian Williams gets the thumbs up from a Moonbat.]

I thought when you got into 'what the President was reading' a kind of smug tone surfaced...almost making the President a school boy who had graduated from reading Cramer's book on DiMaggio to more important works like Camus. I thought that was unfortunate.

[At least Brian managed to keep his teeth from showing when he sneered.]

Brian, the tone of your questions were biased. You asked negative questions and tried to frame the discussion in a way to make the President look bad. I would love to see a main stream media personality ask honest straight forward questions without a hidden agenda behind them.

[And that not so hidden agenda is "BUSH'S FAULT!!!"]

Those who think you were being rude and disrespectful also listen to Limbaugh, O'Reilly, and Coulter, who exemplify the lowest form of disrespect and yellow journalism ever to hit the airwaives.

[Another moonbat thumbs up for Williams.]

Dan Rather spoke the truth in an admittedly awkward piece and we all know his fate. Brian, do not bow down to the corrupt donor class. We need people like you more now than ever before.

["Brian, be just as fake but accurate as Dan Rather."]

Your professionalism, honesty, and class were all in brilliant display in Monday's interview with Bush. You have earned my respect in the short time you've been in the anchor chair. If only I could say the same about Bush. A clueless, swaggering, shallow man who struggles to string together a coherent thought. And yet you were affable, and above all, respectful. Having been at the heart of the Katrina crisis from the beginning, you have been there for the American people in a way Bush never has. Thank you, and keep fighting for the answers.

[When a wacko praises you for your professionalism, what does that say about YOU?]

I personally think Rove, Cheney and Rumsfield run this Country and Bush is just a puppet! They all seem to be from the same mold and have the same mentality against people who actually have to work for a living and didn't get everything handed to them. Just once, I would love to see an honest politician win an election without buying it. I too am a baby boomer with children and grandchildren and I don't think I have ever been so afraid of the future as I have been with this administration leading the Country. My question for Bush, Jr....if you are such a believer in God who created all, how can you hate minorities so much, after all, didn't God create them too? Keep up the "excellent" work Brian.

[Another plug for Brian from another moonbat.]

You asked the touch questions. Hopefully others will follow your example. The President of the United States works for us (we the people), not for big business like Haliburton. George W. is a mental midget and a puppet for Cheney who is destroying the American way of life. His administration is raping & pillaging this country and we the people need to stand up and say enough.

[Do we see a trend here? The moonbats are unanimous in praise of Brian's "professionalism."]

Pres. Bush and he Federal Govt. cannot do everthing.We have to take responsibility and act accordingly. Where were Blanco, Nagin and so on???

[Don't expect hard questions from Brian to Blanco and Nagin. Questions like why were the New Orleans buses allowed to remain idle to become water taxis instead of being used to evacuate people from New Orleans? In BrianWorld it is all Bush's Fault!]

From watching your body language, I thought you struggled a few times as to whether to hammer the President for answers that were less than truthful. Each time you chose not to. While I would have enjoyed the spectacle I thought you were simply showing respect. In view of that I find sugestions that you were disrespectful to be rather ridiculous.

[If you can SEE Brian struggle to keep from hammering the President, what does that say about his professionalism?]

I thought your interview was spot on. Thank-you for speaking truth to power.

["Speaking truth to power" is Leftspeak for Bashing Bush. Great job, Brian!]

WORST PRESIDENT EVER! Great Interview Brian!

[And what does that tell you about where Brian Williams is coming from?]

Your contempt for the President was more than obvious...Shame on you. You had a chance to provide a good public service, but could not get past your own bias. We expect more from someone in your position.

[But, hey, Brian Williams was very respectful of Michael Eric Dyson to the point of not identifying him as the leftwing Bush basher that he is.]

President Bush is a liar and should be put in jail for his actions!!! Well done Mr. Williams...well done.

[Well done Mr. Williams...well done.]

BW- I watched your interview, and felt a little disrespect there. I read your explanation. I believe you didn't show disdain intentionally then laugh at his answers as your colleagues did on MSNBC's Hardball while showing the interview-Nora O'Donnell needs work on presentation.

If Brian did his homework he'd know that FEMA is an agency that has only money....not legions of rescue workers waiting on "hot standby" for a disaster to occur. In addition...New Orleans has been governed by Democrats for fifty years....it should have been Utopia. But those very Democrats have been diverting federal funds earmarked for the levies to their friends and cronies. Has Brian investigated these issues?

[of course, not. Brian needed to be respectful of Blank-Out Blanco and Water Taxi Nagin. And now to the love notes sent by the Democratic Underground moonbats to their new hero, Brian Williams as you can see in this DUmmie THREAD...]

Brian Williams BUSTS Bush on Iraq/Terrorism.

[The DUmmies are oh so happy about the "professional" Brian Williams busting Bush.]

Brian Williams didn't cut Georgie any slack. He looked like he wanted to slug him.

[Thanx for that observation, DUmmie. You have condemned Brian Williams with your praise.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

DUmmie Mike Malloy Angst Now Directed Towards Al Franken

Although the DUmmie anger over the FIRING of Mike Malloy was directed towards Air America Radio yesterday, a lot of their criticism is now starting to find a new target---Al Franken. As we have SEEN, the DUmmies were already less than enthusiastic about Al Franken. However, with the firing of Malloy, the DUmmies are peeved that Air America is continuing to pay MILLIONS to Al Franken for a show that most of them consider boring. The spark that set off the anti-Franken DUmmie diatribes was this THREAD titled, "If it was Randi Rhodes or Al Franken instead of Mike Malloy..." So let us now watch the DUmmie outrage over Malloy being fired instead of Al Franken in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, thanking Al Franken for easing my way into afternoon naps, is in the [brackets]:

If it was Randi Rhodes or Al Franken instead of Mike Malloy...

[Hardly anybody would notice...]

I have the feeling we'd see the same level of outrage. Malloy was one of the original guard on AAR and has his legions of Truthseekers, and he will be sorely missed.

[There might be some outrage over Randi leaving but there would be celebrations if Al Franken's incredibly BORING show was taken off the air.]

Randi definitely. I don't think Al has the passionate fans that Mike and Randi have

[That's because Al's fans are sleeping through his banal monologues.]

But should Al leave AAR, I don't think his fans would be throwing themselves out of windows, if that's what you mean.

[Al's fans will just switch over to strong sleeping pills.]

AL is too bland and says little when you really think about it.

[I never stayed awake long enough to think about it.]

Nothing against Al. I know he is well liked and respected. I don't listen to his show, but I bought Liars and enjoyed it. But to alot of angry progressive's Mike was screaming what we all want to scream sometimes. I listened to him everyday during work, would download his show to my Ipod with AAR premium. I will miss him and Kathy very much. Every morning I download Mike, Randi and Sam, but Mike was the only one I looked forward to hearing what he had to say.

[Why don't you listen to Al? Afraid of causing a traffic accident when you fall asleep while driving your car?]

I don't listen to Al and if he left or got canned I wouldn't care - he is way to middle of the road for me.....a lot of which is most likely due to his potential run for Senate - but for whatever reason I'm not a fan....

[A DUmmie who realizes that Al Franken is using Air America STRICTLY for his planned Senate run.]

If it was Al Franken it'd be on NBC news and on CNN and Faux.

[And treated like a major tragedy even though few can actually stay awake to listen to his show.]

Randi's canning would draw outrage ... maybe more so than Malloy. Franken's would largely draw sighs of relief at DU. He's a milquetoast, mealy-mouthed middle-of-the-roader who's too willing to overlook Israeli war crimes.

[Great support there for Franken.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Air America FIRES Mike Malloy!!!

There will be no Mike Malloy program today - or any day - on Air America Radio as we have been terminated. We are as shocked as you are. We are told its a financial decision.

As a result there is great mourning in the Leftist blogosphere as you can see in this DUmmie THREAD posted by Mrs. Mike Malloy titled, "Mike Malloy Fired from Air America Radio." Joining in the mourning process are the Daily Kos KOmmies with a THREAD titled, "BREAKING: Air America Does It Again - Mike Malloy FIRED." The amazing thing here is that even though many leftists have been ANNOYED by Al Franken or irritated by Randi Rhodes, they almost all liked Mike Malloy. So does this sound like the actions of a thriving radio network or the work of desperate cost cutting in order to afford the overinflated salaries of Franken and Rhodes? I will leave that speculation for later but right now let us join the DUmmies and KOmmies as they mourn the lost of Malloy in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, watching Air America sinking ever faster in the ratings, is in the [brackets]:

We don't have all the details yet, but got a tip from someone who'd seen the new network lineup that we weren't included after all. We just had that confirmed by one of the suits a few minutes ago. We're told that its a financial decision.

[Al and Randi's knick-knacks don't come cheap.]

Thank you so much for your ongoing support and we'll keep you updated as we receive more information.

[Thanx for the news tip, Kathy. It will certainly be a featured DUmmie FUnnies item as we watch the continued sinking of Air America into the ratings toilet.]

omg!! Can anyone confirm this?

[Mrs. Malloy just did plus Mr. Malloy also confirmed it on his website. What do you need? For it to be engraved in stone?]

Kathy is Mike's wife and producer. If she says it's so, it's true.

[They didn't get married last May 12, did they? JUST KIDDING!!! Okay, I am definitely convinced that Air America just stabbed Mike Malloy in the back. So what else is new?]

if this is true than I say SCREW YOU AIRAMERICA!

[It's true but they were already screwed.]

We still have Ed Schultz to listen to ! This was a shot at a little dark humor, hope it didn't hurt too much

[Yeah, you can listen to Blowhard Ed Schultz give his baloney explanation about how he converted into a liberal Democrat while eating a Salvation Army baloney sandwhich which "coincidentally" happened about the same time the DNC handed him a bundle of cash to become a phony liberal.]

The corporate spin-doctors have some kind of lever with the advertisers at AAR and are trying to marginalize and splinter the rest of us. All is okay with whatever but just be aware how successful AAR had become in so short of a time.

[Air America became successful in a short time? And what dreamworld are you living on?]

I will not be listening to AAR if mike is not part of their line-up, I love Randi but not enough to tune in to an outlet that is destroying itself from within.

[Yeah, real success going on their with Air America. Now even their hardcore base is abandoning them.]

I hope it's a joke or prank but...if it's not it needs to receive the widest viewing that DU readers can help it with.

[Hey, I'll even help out by featuring this thread in the DUmmie FUnnies.]

what a SCANDAL! you guys are the best of air america they'll be hearing from me, definitely. i can't believe they'll keep al franken (i turn air america off every day at lunchtime) and not keep you guys.

[Al Franken is very popular in the insomniac wards.]

Was he fired for cause or just because of ratings?

[If it were just for ratings then ALL Air America hosts would be fired.]

Maybe bushco has gotten control of AirAmerikkka

[And Karl Rove is now their program director.]

I predict that Firing Malloy will be the end of Air America.

[That's like predicting the demise of a corpse.]

Air America Radio really f*cked up this time. Looks like the NeoCons have infiltrated AAR management.

[God forbid you lay the blame on the liberals for firing Mike Malloy. No, it's all the fault of those nasty NeoCons. They're everywhere! They're everywhere!]

UN-F*CKING-BELIEVABLE.... No wait it is believable becuase this country is going to shit. From this moment on I am DONE with AAR. Completely done. They can take Jerry Springer and shove him up their asses.

[Ironically, you now sound like a perfect guest for the Jerry Springer TV show... "And today on Jerry Springer, outraged Mike Malloy fans who want to shove Jerry Springer up the asses of Air America!"

Air America is dead to me.

[Can we use that for the Air America promo?]

AAR - Youre dead to me. Bookmarks deleted. As of today, no more... F*ck them. The only one I listened to regularly on that network is Malloy. AAR - You're Dead to me.

[Redundancy can be quite catchy as well as contagious.]

A blitz on AAR sponsors... might cut to the heart of the matter. I listen online so I don't hear most of the commercials. Maybe someone could start a list of sponsors with contact numbers.

[You want a list of AAR sponsors? Just look at blank page.]

Shultz, Franken and the rest of the remaining lot ... are nothing but useless boring idiots IMO.

[And this DUmmie WINS a Kewpie Doll for having a brief moment of mental clarity!]

So sorry Kathy. I foresee the imminent demise of AAR...

[I forsaw that result from the day they went on the air.]

OH HELL NO!!!!!!!!! F*CKING SON OF A BITCH MOTHER F*CKING AA JACK ASS EXECS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Malloy is this generations Thomas Paine. He is THE most powerful voice for the LIBERAL ideals of this country. I love Mike Malloy for his passion and his unrelenting courage to call these mother f*cking bastards in the bush crime family just what they are. And they fired him?!!!! This can't be true, this just can't f*cking be true!

[Mike Malloy fired? Bush's fault! And now we move to the KOmmie WAKE for Mike Malloy...]

BREAKING: Air America Does It Again - Mike Malloy FIRED

[Air America fired Mike Malloy twice?]

The asshats at Air America Radio have shown their stupidity again by firing one of their most popular and progressive hosts, Mike Malloy.

[That's so they can pay the inflated salaries of their least popular hosts.]

HE SIGNED A NEW F*CKING CONTRACT. They said, F*CK OFF today.

[Business ethics, Air America style.]

Franken's their big star. I think Al gets pretty much what Al wants.

[And what Al wants is $$$$$.]

Loved Mike Malloy and wish they would put Al Franken on in his time slot...so I could fall asleep faster.

[Listening to Al Franken works better than sleeping pills.]

The AAR business model is very flawed. Instead of a network of shows they should have been in the syndication business.

[AAR had a BUSINESS model? News to me.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

"Is anyone worried about how falling oil prices will impact the election?"

As Rush Limbaugh often says, good economic news when Republicans are in office depresses the liberals. As proof of this, I present this DUmmie THREAD titled, "Is anyone worried about how falling oil prices will impact the election?." Yes, the DUmmies are WORRIED about good economic times. Not only that, you will see them also worrying about the low unemployment rate and the strong economy in general. Such good news for America is BAD NEWS for the DUmmies. So let us now watch the DUmmies admit they hate seeing gas prices decline in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, who now knows that every cent of price decline on the gas signs means increasing angst among the DUmmies, is in the [brackets]:

Is anyone worried about how falling oil prices will impact the election?

[I've already pulled out my worry beads due to the fact that prices here have dropped about a dozen cents per gallon during the past month. If it drops another dime, I might have to go into therapy.]

While I'm glad that oil prices are falling below $70 and with predictions that they could fall further in October and November, I'm concerned that this could help Bush.

[This DUmmie wants EVERYONE to suffer with high gas prices just so Bush won't be helped.]

People know high gas prices are here to stay and most of them even have an inkling why. Remember, 60% of us aren't nearly as dumb as we look.

[But you are as DUmb as you sound, DUmmmmmie.]

Adjusted for inflation, our current oil price high still isn't even enough to top the 1980 high. I think that voters, unfortunately, will settle for gas around $2.20.

[How "unfortunate" that lower gas will help Bush and the Republicans.]

If the Republicans win the next election-watch the gas prices go up. The sheeple never learn and the cons know it.

[Karl Rove already arranged for a big gas price jump for the day after the elections.]

They are falling for a reason. Oil companies are paying Bush back for all of the huge profits in the last two years. Notice, the election is not too far away. You connect the dots.

[I've connected the dots and they lead to your padded cell.]

Have you ever read 1984? And how Oceana cut chocolate rations, and then raised them again, but not as high as they were before the cut? Oil prices are like the chocolate rations. People, from an emotional perspective, will be willing to embrace Bush again if oil prices fall to their 2004-early 2005 levels, even if back then they were complaining about those prices to begin with. Why is this? Because people's expectations are so diminished and they don't believe that they will see $1.70 again, so $2.20 will be good enough for them as a result.

[DUmmies are stupid. DUmmies have always been stupid. And DUmmies will always be stupid.]

Whoever didn't know this was coming must be the least perceptive person on the face of the earth? So that leads to my next question...Were the Dem's ready for this?

Most Dems on this board have the insight to realize thisBut the general, apolitical public doesn't.

[Too bad the general public isn't as "enlightened" as the DUmmies. They foolishly believe falling gas prices to be a good thing.]

Dude, that's a given...non political people don't know shit!!!

[The DUmmie attitude in a nutshell. They can use it as an all-purpose excuse for why they keep losing elections...in addition to the Diebold excuse.]

There might be "enough time" by November. Gas prices are already falling to the $2.60's in some areas, even though they were up at above $3.00 just a month ago! We still that more than two months before Election Day, and assuming that prices continue falling, that will be enough of a time period for voters to gauge the change.

[Drop to your knees and pray that the general public becomes as idiotic as the DUmmies between now and the elections.

How often can he stick a cattle prod up our asses, shock us, and then turn down the power...

[You just put a big smile on benburch's face.]

Our prices in Newark, DE fell $.20 overnight.Made hubby go "Wow" this morning when we drove past. I just said "Watch'em after the elections. It's only temporary." I bet him a quarter.

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

DUmmies Outraged Over "South Park" Torture Of Saddam

The DUmmies have found a new human rights cause that they can rally behind. It is to protest the "torture" of Saddam Hussein by forcing him to watch the South Park movie, in which he is Satan's gay lover, over and over again. As you can see in this Yahoo! News ARTICLE, the South Park creators, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, said that the U.S. Marines guarding the former Iraqi dictator are forcing him to watch South Park: Bigger Longer & Uncut over and over again. You can get an idea of the "torture" that Saddam is being subjected to be taking a look at this VIDEO clip from the movie featuring his "special relationship" with Satan (warning: strong language and content). As a result of this South Park "torture" of Saddam, the DUmmies are in a state of outrage as you can see in this THREAD titled, "Saddam forced to watch himself in South Park movie." Of course, the average DUmmie would love to subject George Bush to much worse things than just this relatively minor humliation so their protests ring a bit hollow. As usual, the DUmmies concerns over the well-being of Saddam Hussein are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, not losing a moment of sleep worrying about Saddam's "torture," is in the [brackets]:

Saddam forced to watch himself in South Park movie

[Oh, the INHUMANITY!!!]

Former Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein is being made to watch his appearance in cult cartoon South Park while he is behind bars.

The deposed leader on trial in Iraq was featured in the movie spin-off as the lover of the devil. South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut featured Hussein and Satan attempting to take over the world together.

Speaking at the Edinburgh International Television Festival, South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone said US Marines guarding the former dictator during his trial for genocide were making him watch the movie "repeatedly".

"I have it on pretty good information from the Marines on detail in Iraq that they showed him the movie last year. That's really adding insult to injury. I bet that made him really happy," Stone said.

[This cruel torture is almost as inhumane as subjecting the Gitmo prisoners to air conditioning.]

How utterly embarassing...for the Marines, NOT for Saddam. Childish, stupid, sophmoric...

[This coming from a DUmmie who would LOVE subjecting George Bush to childish, stupid, and sophmoric stunts.]

I've heard Satan wasn't too happy about the way he was portrayed either.

[Especially since he has subsequently broken off his "special relationship" with Saddam.]

If true, this is childish bullshit. Given Saddam's limited English skills and his obvious mental fortitude, this is a waste of time.

[It doesn't take much English skills to figure out the "special relationship" of Saddam and Satan when they are hugging each other in bed.]

With Saddam's limited English and his innate inner strength, this is an exercise in amateurville.

[How touching is this DUmmie admiration for Saddam's "inner strength."]

[DUmmies would pee themselves laughing if they had the opportunity to do a lot WORSE to Bush.]

Perhaps he has a sense of humor?

[Somehow I just can't picture Saddam laughing at himself.]

We have Jumped the Shark as a nation.

[For DUmmies, the Jump the Shark moment for America came when we subjected Saddam Hussein to the "torture" of watching his South Park portrayal over and over again.]

When will Trey and Matt go after Bush? Are they scared sh*tless?

[They don't dare to confront the Bush Family Evil Empire.]

Are we, the US citizens, suppose to be proud of this?

[YUP!]

The problem is as a country. We should hold ourselves to much much higher standards in our treatment of prisoners. We should lead by good example not be the bullies of the world.

[I bet the victims of Saddam's torture cells would have welcomed such "bullying" as a relief from the treatment they normally received.]

Hes got his Doritos. I think hes allright.

[Yeah but does he also get salsa dip with that? If not, I'm going to complain to a human rights commission.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

"Why don't the Democrats run on impeachment?"

Remember impeachment? Early this year it was being widely heralded by the Democrats as a reason to vote them back into power in the House and Senate. Then they realized that such a rationale was counterproductive so they kept their mouths shut on this topic and heatedly denied that they will attempt impeachment proceedings if elected. However, it now appears they can't contain themselves. The "I" word is being brought up again with more and more frequency. In addition, many leftwingers, including DUmmies, are frustrated by the downplaying of impeachment as you can see in this THREAD titled, "Why don't the Democrats run on impeachment?" So let us now watch the DUmmies once again impeach their motives in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, noting my DUmmie ants getting more and more antic the closer we get to the elections, is in the [brackets]:

Why don't the Democrats run on impeachment?

[Psst! They really are running on impeachment but they don't want the general public to know that.]

Talk about energizing your base. I think the Democrats ought to make impeachment one of, if not THE, central theme in the upcoming elections. They need to convince all the fence sitters out there that this president needs to go before 2008, that he is a DANGER to the country. (And he is. We all know it.)

Anybody who thinks this president shouldn't be impeached is probably going to vote GOP anyway. He has broken more laws than a mob boss. I say play the impeachment card to win, then follow through with it. Then kick Cheney to the curb.

[Keep it up. Let the word go out. Democrats WANT impeachment! Scream it from every rooftop.]

because we don't want to scare the crap out of anyone thatmight vote democratic that might not be a typical democratic voter dems are running on the promise of OVERSIGHT and that means oversight into iraq and the billions of cash we were handing out that disappeared, oversight into nsa wiretapping, katrina, etc etc. and if that oversight just so happens to lead to charges being brought against the criminals...well, then so be it! (and it will be, i'm sure)

[Oh, go ahead and BROADCAST what you really want---impeachment.]

Nancy Pelosi flat-out said if investigations lead to impeachment, so be it. Screaming it to the rooftops would play into the GOP mantra now. They know what's coming, but we don't need to hand them a campaign slogan by admitting to the inevitable course of action. It's a game.

[Shhh! Your secret game is safe with me. Let us not publicly admit what we REALLY want.]

Politics is a game. And to win we have to be smarter.

[By posting our impeachment strategy in DUmmieland only to have it reproduced in the DUmmie FUnnes. Yup! You sure got the smarts.]

Running on "impeachment" is just not right ... WE all KNOW this crew has done 100 different things that should lead to impeachment, but you have to have the PROCESS first ... Have to have official hearings, and it is putting the cart before the horse to just jump to impeachment ...

[TRANSLATION: We want to kick Bush out of office but we must first go through the pretense of having official hearings.]

I personally think they're doing the right thing by acting like they're not interested in impeachment. They don't want to sound like they're on a witchhunt. Investigations, hearings and oversight will be one of the things on the agenda. You have to investigate before you impeach. I guess the plan is to do thorough investigations and see where that takes us.

[Key word: "acting." See the Democrats must ACT like they are not interested in impeachment even though that is their REAL goal. Of course, they will first go through the PRETENSE of investigations and hearings just to make it all look good.]

My only concern is, as much as I like the Impeachment word, it could backfire, Republicans will call us 'angry unpatriotic democrats'. We have to come across as reasonable.

[It's going to be tough for you to keep up that "reasonable" pretense.]

Bring up these issues and then say "this is why the chimp ought to be impeached". NEVER let the people draw their own conclusions. You have to give the conclusions to the people if you want to win.

[DUmmie Quote of the Week: "NEVER let the people draw their own conclusions."]

Pelosi has already announced she won´t impeach. That´s why there´s little chance of victory, no real guts, not to mention Diebold.

[Give up hope...NOW!!!]

MAYBE IN NOVEMBER, IF WE WIN MAJORITY, MY DREAM WILL COME TRUE AND IMPEACHMENT HEARINGS WILL BE HELD FOR BUSH, CHENEY AND ALL THOSE INVOLVED IMPEACHABLE OFFENSES.

[SOMEDAY MY PRINCE WILL COME!]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Monday, August 28, 2006

Cursing Cheney Heckler Too Obnoxious Even For DUmmieland

Just imagine what an incredible level of obnoxiousness it takes to get yourself tombstoned from DUmmieland. Just the tiniest bit of rationality will get you tossed off that site but if obnoxiousness is directed towards Republicans, such an attitude is usually most welcome over there. Well, this is what happened to Dr. Ben Marble, the guy who heckled the Vice-President last year on the Gulf Coast by constantly screaming "F--- You, Mr. Cheney!!!" Soon afterwards, DOCTOR Marble (as he seems to want to be called) began posting in DUmmieland where is anti-Republican obnoxiousness was most welcome. However, his obnoxious attitude seems to have spilled over to other matters which caused his tombstoning in DUmmieland. To get an idea of DOCTOR Marble's over-the-top obnoxiousness, take a look at Friday's Hardball VIDEO of him sneeringly accusing Rockey Vaccarella of being a (GASP!) Republican as if he were a member of some fringe political group. When not working at his regular job, DOCTOR Ben Marble plays in a Punk Rock Band and shills unlistenable MUSIC and terrible T-SHIRTSon the Web. Meanwhile, I am really curious as to just WHAT got DOCTOR Ben Marble kicked off DUmmieland as was indicated in this THREAD titled, "Dr. Ben Marble is tearing Rockey V a new one on Hardball!" DOCTOR Ben Marble's obnoxiousness and the DUmmie response is in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, hoping that DOCTOR Ben Marble becomes the keynote speaker at the next Democrat National Convention, is in the [brackets]:

He's making him admit to his partisanship, and Dr. MArble said * is the worst president this country has ever had. It is at the very end of the show. They ran out of time, or I think Marble would have kept going.

[With obnoxiousness oozing out of every pore of his body, DOCTOR Ben Marble accused Rockey of being a Republican as if it were some fringe political group.]

I love Marble. Go fugg yourself Cheney -

[Remember, it is DOCTOR Ben Marble.]

Dr Ben posted on DU for a short time after that. He got tombstoned relatively quick. He is a hot head but I like him.

[I would LOVE to read his remarks. Just how low do you have to go to be too hot headed even for DUmmieland.]

I LOVE the fact that his comments to Cheney will always be part of the public record of the Katrina disaster.

[It will remain for all posterity as an embarrassing reminder to DOCTOR Ben Marble as to what a punk he was if he ever grows up.]

He's a wacko, but he's a wacko on our side.

[He's OUR wacko.]

Yeah, I remember that, and I hated to see him go, and even DUers get into it, but I think he went too far. Maybe he had PTSD or something. He was pretty hot today, too.

[How far do you have to go to go too far even for DUmmies? Now I HAVE to see those DUmmieland posts by DOCTOR Ben Marble.]

I always liked Dr. Marble's rough edges. We had a few email conversations about his being tombstoned from DU for acting like an asshole. But that character trait was exactly what made him so endearing when he turned on Cheney.

[DOCTOR Ben Marble was an endearing a--hole.]

He was tombstoned? I was wondering what happened to him. Dr. Marble was featured in Spike Lee's documentary, "When The Levees Broke". That made me think about his postings here at DU. Wow, a new American hero was born when he made that comment to Cheney - TWICE.

[Now that DOCTOR Ben Marble got featured in Spike Lee's documentary, you should welcome him back to DUmmieland. We could use his comedy material here at the DUmmie FUnnies.]

Vacarella is a textbook neoconservative! He himself acknowledges being a 'southern democrat' who became a Reagan Republican - the very epitome of a neoconservative reichbot, imho. He's a despicable dissembler - a damned fool who can't learn from getting scammed over and over and over again by people who pander to his hatreds and bigotries.

[Rockey is somehow despicable while the loudmouth shmuck, DOCTOR Ben Marble, is endearing? Only in the DUmmie Zone.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Sunday, August 27, 2006

DUmmies And KOmmies In Shock Over Plame Leak Source Revelation

With the REVELATION by Newsweek's Michael Isikoff that the REAL source of the leak of Valerie Plame's name to Robert Novak was NOT Karl Rove but frequent critic of the Administration's Iraq policy, Richard Armitage, both DUmmieland and the KOmmieland are in a deep state of shock. Therefore, in order to ease their angst, perhaps this is a good time to take a brief break and serenade them with the Freudenschade song (to the tune of "Edelweiss) composed by that famous Tin Pan Alley songmeister, Charles Henrickson:

Sorry, Lefties but there will be NO Fitzmas and NO Karl Rove frogwalk across the White House lawn despite the fact that one William Rivers Pitt GUARANTEED that he had been indicted on May 12. Once again, the invisible forces of Freudenschade has snatched defeat from the DUmmie jaws of victory. So let us now watch first the DUmmies and then the KOmmies desperately try to deny reality. First we visit this comedic DUmmie THREAD titled, "News Breaking: Armitage's admission to outing Valerie Plame," followed by a trip to the Daily Kos in this THREAD titled, "Newsweek: Plame Outed By Armitage." As usual, the DUmmie and KOmmie mournful bleatings over their stolen Fitzmas are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, still gleefully humming the Freudenschade song, is in in the [brackets]:

News Breaking: Armitage's admission to outing Valerie Plame

[Merry Fitzmas!!!]

Richard Armitage, a well-known gossip who loves to dish and receive juicy tidbits about Washington characters, apparently hadn't thought through the possible implications of telling Novak about Plame's identity.

"I'm afraid I may be the guy that caused this whole thing," he later told Carl Ford Jr., State's intelligence chief. Ford says Armitage admitted to him that he had "slipped up" and told Novak more than he should have.

"He was basically beside himself that he was the guy that f---ed up. My sense from Rich is that it was just chitchat," Ford recalls in "Hubris," to be published next week by Crown and co-written by the author of this article and David Corn, Washington editor of The Nation magazine.

[OOPS!!!]

What a total crock of shit!

[De-Nile is a river in Africa.]

I'm not going to buy he was the lone ranger.

[I'm not going to buy that George Bush was inaugurated in January, 2005.]

And how did Armitage find out?

[Jason Leopold was his source.]

This sounds like a pretty piece of propaganda. How is DavidCorn involved in this? Isikoff is a major player elf. He gave elves a bad name. What is the elf connection?

[I dunno. Why don't you ask the Evil Elf himself---Dennis Kucinich.]

Didn't Novak, on Meet The Press today, say that Armitage wasn't the person who outed Plame to him?

The whitewash cleansing of the holy bush administration just in time...... for the elections. Sounds like a f--king miracle to me? Who would like to fall on their sword next, I'm sure they will be rewarded with 20 virgins and a new idenity and join Ken Lay in bushco's paradise.

[I know benburch would LOVE to fall on a sword or, preferably, a long lance.]

How nice of Armitage to try to be the fall guyfor this gang. Why didn't he come forward 3 years ago and save everyone the time and trouble? Sorry Dick, nice try but we ain't buying your bill of goods today.

[It's because Armitage is a big fan of the DUmmie FUnnies and enjoys laughing at the DUmmies (and KOmmies) making fools of themselves over waiting for their Great Pumpkin known as Fitzmas.]

Wonder how much THEY are paying him?

[Armitage was given a chocolate fountain in exchange for aiding the Vast Rightwing Conspiracy.]

[How dare you question the quality of the TruthOut reports. And now let us join the meltdown on the KOmmie THREAD.]

where's Fitz? I lost 100 bucks on a Frogmarch bet and I think he should reimburse me for it.

[Take your case to Judge Judy.]

Armitage said something to Novak on July 8. It's unclear whether he exposed Plame's covert identity. But in any case, he wasn't part of the plot, we can say with near certainty.

[Can we also say with near certainity that Karl Rove was indicted on May 12?]

When I was a relative newbie here... and Fitz made his "big" announcement re: Libby only, I diaried my devastation and was promptly given the troll treatment by other Kossacks. Every time I hear/read the name Plame, I'm reminded that I'm still bitter about it. Fitz...what a f*cking disappointment.

[Merry Fitzmas!!!]

The article mentions that Fitz found no evidence that Armitage knew she was covert. Apparantly, he learned about Plame from the INR memo, which in no way identifies her as covert.

[And the reason for this is because Valerie Plame was NOT covert.]

Doesn't make sense. If it were just a slip by Armitage, this would have been a non-story ages ago.

[It should have been a non-story from the get-go but thanx to the DUmmies and KOmmies and their press cohorts, this non-story was kept artificially alive when it was really DOA.]

I hate to mention the name Jason Leopold, but on his (and Marc Ash) latest update, he claims that Cheney is the focus of Fitzgerald investigation.

[Then it MUST be as true as the May 12 Karl Rove indictment.]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Gary Hart Falls Off The Deep End

If I were to tell you that I know someone who thinks that George Bush is assuming imperial powers in the same manner as Augustus Caesar in ancient Rome, you would figure the person to be a kook left member of the Democratic Underground aka DUmmies. In addition, if I were to add that this same person also believes that our social and foreign policy must first be submitted to religious fundamentalists then you could also conclude that if not a DUmmie, then this same person could also be a Koo-Koo Daily Kos type. Well, what if I told you that this person was a United States Senator, former presidential candidate and supposedly a respected thinker by the name of Gary Hart? I kid you not. Apparently Gary Hart has gone completely fallen off the deep end of rational thought and posted these sentiments in his Huffington post BLOG imperiously titled, "Twenty-first Century Rome." Supposedly this is Hart's chronicle of the downfall of the American Republic. Instead it represents the complete collapse of Gary Hart's rational abilities. So let us now join Gary Hart fantasizing about an American Empire in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wanting a ride aboard the Monkey Business, is in the [brackets]:

Twenty-first Century Rome

[Twenty-first Century Democrats---A Laff Riot!]

For those of us who believe history holds valuable lessons, there is instruction to be had from the experience of other great powers. In the particular case of the American Republic it is important to consider the history of other republics. Not the least of these examples is the demise of the ancient Roman Republic and its transition to the Roman Empire.

[I remember the more recent history of a presidential candidate who invited the press to follow him around to see if he was cheating. Well, the press did follow him around just like he asked and they caught him cheating.]

That history is well known. The civil wars of the mid-first century BC led to the acquisition of dictatorial power by Julius Caesar lasting from about 49 BC until his assassination on the Ides of March 44 BC. Further unrest if not chaos ensued until, in 27 BC, Caesar’s adopted son Octavianus became the first Roman emperor as the first Augustus.

[Professor Gary delivering a history lesson from the deck of the Monkey Business.[

So much for the dates and names. The question is how Augustus became emperor. How did he go about finally ending a republic founded in 510 BC?

[If I give the right answer, do I win a date with Donna?]

First, “he took steps to neutralize the army as a political force.” Of course, in a republic that would be a good thing, because in republican Rome the armies as political forces had helped bring about the demise of the Republic. But in Augustus’s case he achieved his objective by making the army his instrument. Control of the army was control of state power.

[Stand by. Professor Gary is about to lead his history lesson towards his real target.]

Second, he took control of the system of laws and justice. Little could happen with the magistrates and judges that did not meet his approval and conform to his policies. To control the legal system was to control the entire nation.

[Did he appoint a certain Judge Alitus to help him control the legal system?]

And, third, like his adoptive father Caesar, Augustus was “imaginative and innovative in his exploitation of religious sentiments.” Augustus understood that the integration of the state with religion was the key to control of the nation’s culture.

[Golly gee! I wonder where this is all leading? Hmmmm.]

The army, the courts, and religion. The keys to the creation of the Roman Empire.

[Get ready with the life preservers! Professor Gary is about to jump overboard from the Monkey Business.]

In 21st century America the current government (the presidency and Congress of one party) has taken control not only of defense and military policy, but also military operations. No other administration, including that of Abraham Lincoln during the Civil War or Franklin Roosevelt in World War II, has ever done that. The unprecedented imposition of neoconservative ideology on military operations has led directly and inevitably to the debacle in Iraq.

In the last five years we have seen an effort by the current government to control the American judicial system by the appointment of ideologically selected judges. The unprecedented attempt to make the administration of justice the instrument of ideology is incompatible with the Constitution of the Republic whose flag we salute.

[Appointing judges compatible with the political philosophy of the sitting president. Who ever heard of such a bizarre notion? Perhaps Bush should appoint judges who believe that international law takes precedent over American law like that Supreme Court justice whose name is the same as an ice cream brand.]

And, of course, the Republican party has been imaginative and innovative in its exploitation of religious sentiments. The unprecedented submission of social policy, and foreign policy in the Middle East, to religious fundamentalists violates the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution and has weakened America in the world.

[Yes, Professor Gary. It is a well known fact that President Bush submits all social and foreign policy to Pat Robertson for his approval. Oh, and Pat Robertson must also first approve of all meds prescribed for you.]

The army, the courts, and religion. The keys to the creation of the American Empire.

[And where is the key to your padded cell, Professor Gary? And now on to the Huffington Post HUffie peanut gallery comments chanting their approval for their new mentor...]

Nero reportedly played his fiddle while Rome burned.

George Bush takes yet another vacation.

Nero blamed the Christians.

George Bush blames everyone else.

Nero had a strange relationship with his manipulative, ambitious mother. Nero is blamed for her murder. Nero was deranged.

Hmmmm.....

[Don't forget to also compare Bush to Caligula.]

And so, with a dry alcoholic uber-privileged frat boy at the helm, the country rots from the top through massive corruption in all three branches of the government and media and from financial ruin brought by their pillaging of the treasury.

[All hail our emperor! The mighty Chimpus Khan!]

And those in this government's administration would not deny any of it. Yet, by hook and certainly crook, it's been allowed to happen. Our country is selling it's soul. IMPEACH NOW.

[All lefist roads lead to IMPEACHMENT.]

This essay should be printed in every newspaper in America.

[For placement in the FUnnies section.]

The separation of Church and State is not about keeping religion safe from government, but keeping the government safe from religious fanatacism.

[A "constitutional scholar" speaks his empty mind.]

Well, Gary, it was a good run. 224 years of being the most respected country on the planet is pretty good. The last 6 we can count out. It's pretty amazing when you consider that after 9/11 we had the VAST majority of the WORLD behind us supporting us. Then a cabal of truely EVIL people trashed all that good will, and WE now get to suffer for it. I suppose it's the punishment we have to pay for allowing them to steal and destroy our Republic.

Hail Ceaser.

[Hail Chimpus Khan.]

And there are more than a few similarities between Bush 43's mother and Augustus's wife, Livia.

[And between Jeb Bush and Tiberius.]

Does the central influence over religion mean that individual pastors are no longer in control of their flocks? Is there any chance they could rebel, or does the carrot of faith based spending and the stick of threat of removal of tax-exempt status mean pastors not subject to carrot and stick tend to get moved out, and those who are motivated in these ways tend to rise in power, kind of like what happens in the military?

[Not a chance. All those pastors are wearing secret decoder rings that emit mind control waves that keep them in total obedience.]

By the year 170 A.D., the military, not the Emperor was calling the shots. No Emperor could be chosen by The Roman Senate without the approval of the most powerful military faction. The Emperor remained Emporer as long as the military got what it wanted.

That is where we are now; not back in Caesar's time where the Emperor controlled the military. The Pentagon controls U.S. foreign policy, not the President. The Pentagon is certainly comfortable with President Bush's endless war policy.

[Yet another of the Gary Hart acolytes spewing utter nonsense into the wind.[

Very good, Senator. Now would you please give us a similar discussion of the parallels between the Nazi rise to power in Germany and the steps taken by the Bush administration? There are many and I believe with your expertise and potential to have a wide audience this would be very helpful. In fact, a book on these parallels similar to your one about God would be a very helpful contribution.

[A HUffie begging Gary Hart to sink the good ship Monkey Business.[

yes, this is happening. It is completely frightening. I am waiting for Bush to 'postpone' the elections on grounds of National Security. This is evil stuff - we have taken the election process for granted. Everyone should read 1984 by Orwell and acquaint themselves with the concept of 'doublethink'. George called it 57 years ago - he knew that the subversion a democracy is founded on the process of blurring the lines between truth and lies. Bush = Big Brother. Be very afraid - and then DO SOMETHING.

[Please report to Room 101 for a thorough rectal exam of your brain.]

Bush is a puppet of big oil and big money - the american people are being conned just like the Romans.

[Didn't you get the memo above? Bush is Big Brother. Wait, no! Bush is a puppet of big oil! I mean Bush is Big Brother. Or is he is a puppet of big oil? No, make that...]

Yes, Mr. Hart. And the little evil genius known as Karl Rove has everything to do with it.

[All hail the REAL emperor, Rovian Augustus!]

This is the model of how to build empires. However, you forget the most important thing. Using the Army against the people as a weapon of terror. The 300 Spartans that marched on Rome remember? Why? Because they were forced to by the Roman Army. They needed fear in the Roman Polulace for htem to surrender control to "protect the people".

[Thanx for the history lesson about the 300 Spartans that marched on Rome by walking across the Adriatic Sea.]

I read "The Rise and the Fall of the Roman Empire" as a teenager, and the many parallels are well documented. Here's another one...Rome ran out of Roman citizens to fight its wars and started hiring mercenaries. Maybe Blackwell can't compare with the Huns, but they're close!

[Did you also read "The DECLINE and Fall of the Roman Empire?"]

Roman invaded and humiliated Britain. So anytime you read a history about Rome in English from English translators YOU ARE READING ONE BIASED PIECE OF PULP FICTION.

[Toss away everything written by Gibbons!]

Most Americans have about as much interest in the impending crisis as cows have of their impending date with the slaughterhouse, and those who are politically motivated are fighting battles between 'right' and 'left', shadow boxing, instaed of coming together and taking on the institutions which make that shadow. It's the same in my country, and I can't see a way out of it. Every aspect of our respective societies have been corporatised, until we are only left with screaming into the vaccuum of hyperspace. How do we get out of this mess?

[The only solution is to hand out large quantities of Guy Fawkes costumes although my preference is for a Donna Rice blowup doll.]

The President's Party is in league with the usurpers and the opposition Party is non existent. It is a mix of collaborators and cowards. At least in the case of Augustus, you had a man of principle and competence. George on the other hand exhibits the wisdom of Caligula and the competence of Nero.

[Thank you, thank you, thank you for including the Caligula comparison! The Gary Hart acolyte lunacy is now complete!]

Football and baseball stadia are our modern day Coliseums. How different is celebrity or athlete worship from gladiator worship?

[The odds of the modern "gladiators" living another day are much, much higher.]

We had our run as a great country...shit happens...evil rules....down the tubes. How about a revolution?????????????

[Groovy! Lets all have a revolution as soon as we finish ingesting our meds!]

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

Bill Maher Beats The Impeachment Drum

Earlier this year, the Left was playing the impeachment drumbeat loud and clear. Then they suddenly got the memo that their calls for "chimpeachment" were counterproductive to the Democrat effort to win back the House and Senate. So for a few months hardly anything was heard again about impeaching Bush. However, now that the election is nearing, the Left simply can't contain themselves. Suddenly the word "impeachment" is sounding loud and clear in the Leftist Blogosphere again. And now adding his two cents to the impeachment drumbeat is Bill Maher as you can see in his Huffington Post BLOG titled, "Why Not Impeachment?" So let us now join the TV host with a face for radio in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, urging the Democrats to continue being counterproductive, is in the [brackets]:

Why Not Impeachment?

[Why not impeach Bill Maher from TV?]

So a judge has ruled that not only is Bush's warrantless wiretapping program illegal, it's also unconstitutional. And not just unconstitutional, but doubly unconstitutional; it violates both the 1st and 4th amendments. We're talking a smackdown of Judge Judy-esque proportions.

[Judge Judy rules in cases where she has a CONFLICT OF INTEREST? Because that is what happened in this case with Judge Anna Taylor Diggs. She should have RECUSED herself from this case because the plaintiff (ACLU) received a $45,000 grant from a foundation in which she is Secretary and Trustee. If anyone deserves impeachment here, it is Judge Taylor.]

Now, I'm not really pushing the impeachment of George Bush, unless it's about lying about that fish I talked about last season. Them I'm all for it.

[However, you are doing a really good impression of pushing impeachment.]

But if this decision stands, and this program is unlawful and unconstitutional, federal law expressly makes the ordering of surveillance under the program a federal felony. That would mean that the president could be guilty of no fewer than 30 felonies while in office. Moreover, it is not only illegal for a president to order such surveillance, it is illegal for other government officials to carry out such an order. And that means Alberto Gonzalez could be tried, convicted, and deported.

[You're going to deport Alberto Gonzalez to San Antonio where he was born?]

So let's just say for the sake of argument that the Supreme Court upholds this decision and says Bush broke the law and violated the Constitution. President Clinton was impeached for lying under oath in a civil case, a case that had no bearing on the public as a whole. This would - unquestionably - be a greater offense.

[Given the fact that Judge Taylor had a CONFLICT OF INTEREST and should have RECUSED herself from this case, your "sake of argument" proposition is an extreme longshot.]

How would you square impeaching Clinton and not impeaching Bush? Or would Bush have to sleep with this judge in Detroit?

[I've seen that judge. If I were Bush I would choose being impeached in a heartbeat.]

It's sort of like the 7 minutes question I always ask Republicans. Are you loyal to the man, or to the principle?

[Why don't you ask a similar question to all those liberal legal "scholars" who a few years ago claimed that perjury was NOT an impeachable offence. And now on to the comments from the HUffers at the Huffington Post...]

Bush is impeachable for many reasons. But of course we have a republican house and senate, so it wouldn't happen. And even if the dems take control in November, I'm not sure it SHOULD happen. That would leave Cheney the president. The logical approach would be to pressure Cheney to resign, replace him with someone we could live with, then pressure Bush to resign under threat of impeachment. Resignation or conviction on the bill of impeachment = another Gerald Ford. I'd settle for that.

[According to the Democrat Underground DUmmies, if Bush is impeached (and removed from office), then John Kerry automatically becomes president. And now you know why we call them DUmmies.]

Judge Anna Diggs Taylor serves as the Secretary and Trustee of a foundation that donated funds to the ACLU of Michigan, a Plaintiff in the case. Nah, thats not a conflict. Is it?

[A HUffie correctly points out one of many reasons why this dopey judicial decision will be REVERSED.]

Cheney would NOT become president. The dems will take back congress and impeach Bush and Cheney. That leaves Pelosi as the president.

[A HUffie admitting that this impeachment talk is definitely POLITICAL.]

Both Bush and Cheney should be indicted for war crimes. Unfortunately, they are backed by a Republican Congress and their lies, corruption and treasonous actions will never surface because the GOP is more concerned about covering up for these criminals. There is plenty of evidence out there to support the fact that if they weren't directly involved with 9/11, they certainly allowed it to happen as a pretense for invading Iraq. Invading Iraq was on their agenda before 9/11. They should be on trial for mass murders in this country and abroad. How dare they talk about Saddam being brought to justice. Who will bring these damn neocons to justice. Where is the outrage of the American people, or have we just allowed them to continue with their New World Order and just call it fighting terrorism

[The HUffies are now being exposed here to the DUmmie LIHOP/MIHOP mindset.]

Why not impeachment? Well, Bill's making light of the issue, but there's a more serious constitutional problem that this Bush regime has made obvious. The presidential line of succession is seriously flawed and needs to be changed. Right now, we are in a no win situation. Bush can't be impeached because then that would mean Cheney is the president, and we all know Cheney is guilty of anything that Bush is guilty of, and probably he's guilty of more than Bush. So, can we impeach them both? I think the law would allow for an impeachment of the administration if it was found that both the President and VP were guilty of the same impeachable offense.

[A HUffie making up impeachment law for the convenience of the Democrats.]

BILL!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!! I want you to be my babys' dady. LOL I am a guy. LOL

[Is that you, John Mark Karr?]

We must impeach, at a minimum, both the President and the Vice President, for these shameful abuses.

[Which would yield a President Pelosi. Not a very attractive prospect for voters this November.]

All I know is that we should have hired Hezbollah to rebuild New Orleans.

This is just what Karl Rove wants to hear. He as well as many on both sides of the aisle are convinced that the American people generally don't like the idea of impeachment for any president. Its too divisive and traumatic for the nation. Even many who did not like Bill Clinton opposed impeachment and its aftermath. Not likely to get a Nixon Resigns outcome here. Many believe, falsely I believe, that the desire to impeach Bush is Democratic payback for the Clinton deal and that the clinton deal was Republican payback for Nixon. Many American feel that to impeach Bush will perpetuate the payback syndrome. They may actually be right. The republicans will campaign on the idea that Democrats want to win just to impeach Bush, and that will work to Republican advantage. This will only work when the people have had enough. Democrats should run on solving the problems and getting us out of this mess. The people will support that. Republicans are already running using the face of Nancy Pelosi Ted Kennedy and Reid to say what the country will be like under a Democratic administration.

[Shhhh! Please don't reveal the Secret Rovian Plan.]

I love you Bill Maher! I've told everyone on our website that Friday is the big night, that you'll be back on HBO at 11 p.m. est. I can't wait - it's like I've been living in an alternate universal whenever your show isn't on. Take me home, Bill! Take me home!

Mr Maher, I think you have accurately summed up why the right has absolutely no intention to loose control of the House or Senate this year. The days of law and order have passed. We are now in the days of POWER. He who has it keeps it, no matter what.

[Time to pull out those dopey Guy Fawkes masks.]

Hey guys, the way I see it, we've got about 5 months until impeachment. I'll be putting that bottle I've been saving for Jesus' return on ice for that one.

[Is that you, John Conyers?]

(You can now access the DUmmie FUnnies simply by typing "DUmmieFUnnies.Com" into your URL address box.)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I have a VERY SPECIAL offer for my DUmmie FUnnies fans. It is a product I have been using myself and fully endorse: the amazing HELICOPTER KITE. This helicopter kite flies like a helicopter. You can make it go hundreds of feet into the air or hover it just a couple of feet off the ground. The propellor rotation is done entirely by windpower. Please check out the VIDEO of the INCREDIBLE helicopter kite. Not only was the helicopter kite aerodynamically designed but it is also MADE IN THE USA! The helicopter kites have a LIFETIME warranty so all defective or broken parts will be replaced. Your purchase of the helicopter kite will not only provide you with lots of FUn this summer but it will also help keep the DUmmie FUnnies going. So take a look at the VIDEO and be AMAZED!

About Me

I am a 30,000 year old reincarnated being who materializes once every 5000 years in a Las Vegas hotel suite. My greatest goal in my eternal life is to spend 6 months on a small tropical island with Mary Matalin doing nothing but pitching a DUmmie FUnnies book (with CD-ROM insert) deal with her. If you happen to be Mary Matalin, please contact me at:
pjcomix@gmail.com. If you are anybody else, you can contact me there too. Remember, if you are a book publisher, please feel free to embarrass me with an extravagant book advance.