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Friday, February 26, 2016

Comics Rant: Silver Surfer #1

Another fucking reboot!!!! Well, it's a book by Dan Slott and Mike Allred, so you know it's gonna be freaking good. But instead of a complete and total reboot we get a brand new story picking up where the last Silver Surfer book left off. So that's good. But we get a new number 1. That's bad. (Simpsons reference.) No word on if the Silver Surfer and Dawn Greenwood get their pick of toppings. That's good. Yup.

Dawn's father and sister are still on Earth waiting for her to someday return, which she does in the form of when some aliens (not Alien) show up on t.v. to tell all of us puny humans that they are going to take our greatest resources and there is nothing we can do to stop them. Then they all start to laugh, because, you know, that's what bad guys do. Don't think so? Shit, man it's in the handbook they get. Damn thing is probably written by Dr. Doom. That or a Doombot. Yeah, a Doombot.

Surfer and Dawn interrupt the aliens because they just happen to be broadcasting to Earth. So yeah, Dawn totally hacks the feed to contact her family back on Earth. Good idea. Well, really Dawn talks and Surfer kicks the aliens' asses for good measure.

Arriving back home Dawn learns her sister is married and also pregnant. Dang. I guess a lot of erotic things go down when you and your silver boyfriend are riding around the space ways. So to get back up to speed on all that she's missed, Dawn, her father, sister, and the Silver Surfer watch The Wizard of Oz. Just then the aliens show up and steal all of the creative works from our culture. Music, comics but not Rolling Stone. Fuck that.

Surfer silvers up and he and Dawn ride off to fight the aliens as only they can. In hipster fashion. Zing. The Silver Surfer and Dawn come across the aliens in the form of the culture they've just stolen. So you get some who look like Marty McFly and the Terminator. I can't say more, but you should really check it out for yourself. It's really something to behold. It's pretty freaking sweet.

Sadly our tale has to end and it does it with Dan Slott bringing us the Thing. Yeah, that one, from the Fantastic Four! Finally, I was wondering when his orange rocky ass would show up in a Marvel comic. He's on a funky planet and then he gets attacked by another alien (so many freaking aliens) who use their ray gun to take over Ben's mind and have plans to attack Earth next. Dun, Dun, Dun!!! No problems here. This was a brilliant issue, Grade A all the way. Worth the price of admission.