Lathered in typical Greg Dark ambience, Hootermania
is an adult fairy tale replete with the bizarre character
overload, stark irreverence, staccato editing, a ludicrous
plot line and loads of sexual whimsy. It's a fun tape. Wacky?
To a degree, except that Dr. Butts 3 does it better.
Erotic? Boy, you're going to have to spend some time lobbying
me on that one.

As in New Wave Hookers 3, Jon Dough, again, has the
lead role. He's "Sir" Bob Thing, a tit-deprived "idiot" who's
lived in a bathtub all his life. With the impalpable logic
that drives a Greg Dark feature, Dough's chosen to pursue a
knightly quest in search of the "impeccable pair of fleshy
orbs". Crystal Wilder as the celestial Mama Jama gives him
this commission with the understanding that Dough's success
will re-establish and set the world back into the proper
order of erotic well being. In his Galahadian galumphing
about look­ing for trashy dames with the tits of gold,
Dough must ask the puzzling question, "To whom do they
serve?"

If you're willing to buy into this premise and haven't hit
the eject button at this stage of the game, you're served
noticed that Hootermania is another Alice in
Wonderland take off and has the dementia, but not nearly the
sexual resiliency, of the Dr. Butts tapes which it,
apparently, tries to be the big tit equivalent.

A pocket pussy with an attitude is Dough's guide and
companion, and their constant bickering is funny. Other
moments worth calling attention to include "chicken man"
Jonathan Morgan nailing Lynn LeMay with "The Frankensteiner,"
(very similar to his coupling with Debi Diamond in The
Fury). This is the best scene, by far.

In their time together, Mark Wallice works his toes on
Tianna Taylor's boobs like they were Van Cliburn's piano
keys. Natasha performs at a bachelor party for Terry Thomas,
Wallice, Ron Jeremy and a cast of cardboard cut outs. Natasha
gets mini-gang banged in the process, though not by the
cut-outs.

"Crying girl" Danyel Cheeks weeps because her boyfriend
doesn't like her tits. Without so much as a howdy-do she
takes it up the ass from Dough. But because of the angle, it
takes awhile for the viewer to realize Dough's connecting
with her sphincter. (And what's with this epidemic of badly
rendered anal scenes?). We should weep, not Cheeks.

"Upside down girl" Leanna Foxxx stays gravity this way in
order to keep her tits hard. She fucks "dog men" Jack
Armstrong and Ted Craig, while Crystal Wilder finally puts in
her sexual appearance in the cast gang bang finale, thus
resolving the story and prompting the viewer to wonder why
he's hung in there so long for the dumb punch line.

Greg Dark titles sell like hot cakes. Even the terminally
idiotic ones. Keep that in mind when stocking.