So this is how you get kids hooked on bubbles.

The next seltzer you buy might be called Unicorn Kisses instead of Pamplemousse. In the seltzer race, Polar is going hard, and that means we now have these mini cans of seltzer—8 oz., compared to the standard 12 oz.—in bright colors with silly names. The company crowd-sourced all the "myths" on social media last April, creating stories and characters for each recipe—a lot to fit on a tiny little can—and ended up with four limited-edition flavors: Mermaid Songs, Yeti Mischief, Dragon Whispers, and yes, Unicorn Kisses. The stories on the back of each cans are like reading the back of a cereal box, making them nostalgic for adults and ideal for kids' lunch boxes. You roll the dice every time you drink one since you have no idea if it will taste like cherry, lime, grapefruit, or some mix of flavors, which is kind of exhilarating but also frustrating if you are a fully-grown human who is hesitant about trying new things.

Unicorn Kisses

The myth: "Once upon a time, our great-great-grandfather came upon a unicorn with which he traded his pocket full of rainbows for the sparkle that one day would become Polar Seltzer."

How that really tastes: The sweet smell of Unicorn Kisses (and almost all of the seltzers) was overpoweringly candy-like, but the flavor, like a fine wine, was much more subtle. It was like a watermelon Jolly Rancher with a bit of strawberry bubblegum aftertaste. Almost every taster mentioned nostalgic candy, from Dum-Dum lollipops to candy necklaces, but a few others compared it to medicine, like Pepto Bismol. We guess the fizziness is supposed to be the sparkle they speak of, but it's probably not worth trading a pocketful of rainbow. Maybe a pocketful of sunshine, though...

Mermaid Songs

Courtesy of Polar Seltzer

The myth: "Along Cape Cod, where the summer sun reflects deep into the ocean, mermaids dance and sing while enjoying the sparkle of seltzer like the humans on the shore."

How that really tastes: This had an "oddly aggressive Swedish Fish flavor," so it's like the car snacks you ate on the way to visit Great Aunt Carol in ...Cape Cod? It also tasted like strawberry-kiwi Snapple to one taster and apple to another, so it's a mixed bag of fruit essences. A taster painted an interesting picture about how this flavor came to be: "There were blue raspberries somewhere around here, and then someone refilled the spa water at the end of the day without replacing the fruit. It's vaguely...aquatic."

Yeti Mischief

Courtesy of Polar Seltzer

The myth: "As winter days turn to dusk, these mischievous creatures come out to play in newly fallen snow. Just as they begin to head home, they furtively transform the sparkle of the fresh snow into impossibly good seltzer."

How that really tastes: The "lime-y and pine-y" flavor aligned with Yeti Mischief's backstory for some, but others thought it tasted more like chalky Smarties candies. There were subtle "fruit punch things happening" and a "vague minty-ness" for some tasters. One editor remarked it's like "very mild Juicy Fruit gum, after 20 minutes of chewing—maybe the yeti chewed the gum?" We were left with more questions than answers.

Dragon Whispers

Courtesy of Polar Seltzer

The myth: Flying above the green mountains, these golden winged creatures unwittingly singe the forest treetops with their fiery tongues. To protect the Evergreens, they cool their breath with ice-cold seltzer."

How that really tastes: This had a "barely-there citrus vibe" that one taster compared to "watered-down Orangina." We hoped it would taste like dragonfruit, but were disappointed—it was more like bubblegum or "bad Starburst." This is not something that Daenerys Targaryen's dragons would quench their thirst with. The cans are a more fitting size for Mushu from Mulan. It wasn't very sweet, but after taking a sip, someone said, "This is like if a dragon stole some Fruity Pebbles." We don't want to know how that became seltzer.

Did you know there are people whose job it is to deliver you seltzer FOREVER?