Tuesday, 11 August 2009

This weekend the annual 'Poker In The Park' event will be held in London's Lye-ceester Square, Dear Melted Felt Readers. With freerollaments, t-shirt giveaways and D-List poker celebrities it promises to be fun for all the family.

However the Melted Felt Mole has tipped us off that the organisers are very worried, a freak weather sytem somewhere close to Norway looks likely to threaten Sunshine on the big day, something that only happens in London once every 47 years - and a major headache, since almost all of the target audience of poker players are too pale to venture out in the daytime sun uncovered.

Many options were considered ahead of the big day - which features a special Jamie Gold charity tournament to try and raise funds to buy the alledgedly now broke biggest tournament prize-winner of all time a new pair of shoes. Blankets were rejected as not being 'balla' enough, the idea of wearing sunglasses while outside was laughed at by poker playing potential attendees - and changing the start time to after sundown was no good either, as this clashed with the nightly $5 re-buy.

In the end good old British innovation came up with the goods - specially designed shoe-boxes which the attendees can wear over their heads. There is a 'monitor size' hole cut out of the front in which players can see the action, a (selectable) photo of you favorite poker pro to mimic the poster on your dorm wall, and the special scent of stale beer, mouldy coffee dregs and half chewed pizza to mimic that dorm feeling.

What is more it is hoped that the 'monitor view' headgear will prevent some of the rather unfortunate shock caused when some online players came face-to-face with genuine female promo staff in last years event for the first time, though councillors are on hand just in case