Email this to a friend

Did you guys know the French, our NATO allies, are selling two high tech amphibious assault ships to Vladimir Putin and Russia for more than a billion dollars? Two ships, that according to U.S. intelligence, Russia does not have the technological capabilities to manufacture on their own, and that will bolster Russia’s military capabilities in an area of need. All this despite Putin’s clear disdain for the U.S. and NATO, the White House’s strong disapproval of the sale, and Russia’s recent incredibly troublesome aggression against neighboring countries? A troubling development, if not strategically certainly symbolically. Eh fuck it who cares, here’s the Heisman trophy winner stealing seafood on video.

Jameis just strolls right out with those bad boys in hand, high against his chest for everyone to see. I get the whole “act natural” thing when shoplifting, the “I totally bought this don’t worry about me” routine. However, the problem is that there isn’t a person in the history of modern shopping who has ever said to the cashier, “Just the crab legs, and no, I don’t need a bag.” Not your smoothest move, Jameis.

Rob Fox (né Bacon) is Director of Video Content and a Senior Writer for Total Frat Move, Rowdy Gentleman, and Post Grad Problems. He is a graduate, without honors, from the University of Missouri. Rob is originally from St. Louis, and currently lives in Austin, Texas. He still has not admitted to his family what he does for a living, and is prone to having wet nightmares ever since losing his virginity in a haunted house. Email: rob@grandex.co

Hey who knows? Maybe he really did forget to pay. I’m sure it’s tough for him to remember that you actually have to pay for goods and/or services. I mean the guy’s IQ is definitely lower than his average points per game and when he speaks (if you can call it speaking) he is completely unintelligible. Little kids take stuff from stores all the time without realizing it’s wrong, so I think we should all give him a break and take it easy on him.