News from Hell A

From Hobophobia to Hobosexuality

DOWNTOWN – They smell. They’re poor. They’re hot??! Hobos are now officially hip and many celebrities are coming out in support of them as the homeless are facing increased hobophobic attacks in Santa Monica and other Westside enclaves as reported below.

“I’ve been dating a hobo, I call him Mr. Bojangles, for a few months and he’s the bomb,” said teen High School Musical 3 heart-throb, Brandy Cole. “He made me a necklace using cigarette butts and gum and now all of my friends want one…and they want him.”

LA’s gay community is also going hobo. Several hobosexual clubs – not to be confused with obamasexual – have opened in WeHo and many turned out for a recent rally in support of new proposed laws against hobophobia. “We understand hate and bigotry,” said one activist. “Hobos, even though they often smell like a landfill, are humans too. They need hugs, not hate….and perhaps a good scrub down.”