I've never done this online before... currently having a lot of mental health problems. My social anxiety is out of control and there's a 6 month waiting list to see a doctor in my town. My meds are all out of whack and I just can't physically go to a room full of people right now. Just want to get to know people and do whatever I need to within my limits right now to stay sober. I recently relapsed due to these problems. Saturday was my first day of committing to sobriety again.

Welcome here siboz, I saw this in the other post you made under the court card thread - “I'm at a point where I can admit complete and total powerlessness and take suggestions.”

As you probably know those are the sort of thoughts we need for AA to work, like you I was in and out of AA for a number of years, when I finally reached the point which I believe you may be at now, it was the beginning of the end of a pretty wild and crappy life.

If you can't make it to a meeting, I am one of those who say all is not lost, our main book has a story of someone in the same boat who got through fine, and that was before we had this great way of communicating via the internet. I will put up a couple of links to some chapters from that book, if you have or can get a copy of the book, (it's online as well), but with a paper copy you might sit a while each day, and follow along with a workshop on you tube. Just by typing in 'AA Big Book Workshop,' you will get a choice of a few, Joe and Charlie and the one by Chris R are popular, also on you tube by typing in 'AA Speakers' you get a range of stuff to choose from.

I hope you find what I have found. Peace of mind I did not know was possible. Glad you are here.

Step 6 is "AA's way of stating, the best possible attitude one can take in order to make a beginning on this lifetime job... with most of them we shall have to be content with patient improvement." 12&12 Step Six, p.65

Hi everyone , I am looking for some guidance or at least opinions on the following issue i have....I was at a meeting and during the break a fellow member started a conversation with me which quickly lead to him making racial slurs,. This has happened before and i did nothing except discontinue my conversation with him. This meeting currently appears to have all white English people in it so he isnt directing his comments at any particular individual. I am quite new in recovery but was considering taking this to the group conscience....would this be advisable ?

Welcome here johnk, sorry we didn't notice your post and give our opinions on your issue earlier, normally when new members come we like to be quick in doing that.

In my opinion since he did this privately to you in the break, it's not a matter for the group conscience, it's just for you to do as you did and stop talking to him. Maybe he will ask why you don't like to talk with him, and then you might say that you expected people in recovery to be above doing such things. Of course if this happens during the meeting in front of everyone it should be a group conscience decision to ask him to cut it out. I personally think those who do this are lacking in class, and we have had a member from a depressed area of Detroit, here recently saying that racial slurs are common in his meetings and it put him off.

I just came from a meeting of my home group, and where I live in the Caribbean we have all sorts of races. Although most who don't know think it's mainly people of African origin that's not true. We have as many Indians as we have blacks, and a good bunch of whites like myself, then some Chinese and some a mixture of all of the above, so we don't talk race at all. It's disappointing when people who are meant to be following the principles of our program, lower themselves to the level of racial slurs, like you I would not have be pleased to witness this.

"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

Today is my 100th day. For some time during my early days of drinking, few drinks helped me intuitively know how to handle things that baffled me. Now that I am sober I need suggestions. Can someone please give me any tips on living with a narcissistic spouse and still staying sober? I am constantly talking to my sponsor about the issue too and want to get any help I can from the AA family.

I would try to avoid any interaction but I am more worried about the kid. Baby is so scared and since I am not drinking anymore, I get to watch and notice what is going around at home .

Congratulations on the 100 days, well done. I agree that it seemed like a few drinks made it easier for me to make decisions, now I know that basically all it was is that I relaxed after a few, and was able to view the problem from all angles, or so I thought. My experience is that practicing the program for a while has given me other ways to relax, and I have become much better at finding solutions for life’s problems, than I ever was while drinking, it takes a while but I expect you will have the same experience.

It’s fairly common here that members have questions about things happening in the home, and no doubt issues like the one you are having might make sobriety a little more difficult, but I was one always looking for excuses to go back out, and just hope you don’t do that, as you probably know it just gets worse. I am afraid I am at a bit of a loss regarding advise on what to do, of course you would have spoken to your spouse about this, some people report visiting a counselor has helped.

Perhaps others may have better suggestions, but where this post is at the end of an older thread, it may not get as many responses as most new members here normally get to their questions, let’s wait and see. There's a good bunch of sober folks here, please feel free to post anything anytime.

"Good morning, this is your Higher Power speaking. I will not be needing your help today."

Thank you Brock. I am looking for a good Family Therapist now and wife seems willing. Things still are unclear but hanging on to the hope that the things happen exactly the way they are intended by higher power. Praying. Thanks for the support.