I was always comfortable with my body. It was easy. I was 5’7, 115 lbs and shaped like an hourglass. There was no shortage of compliments coming my way. Anytime I didn’t feel comfortable about myself there were people around who told me otherwise.

That all changed when I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue. The pain that engulfed my body forced me to spend more time hibernating on the sofa. The zombie-like medications all had one common side effect…weight gain.

It seemed like the extra padding piled on overnight but it wasn’t true. It just took time for me to notice that my size 4 frame crept up to a 10 then eventually made it to a 14.

My body changed and so did my comfort levels.

The mantra: Om

Pronunciation: A-U-M

Om is said to be the first sound heard when the universe was created. Saying Om unblocks your throat chakra and enables you to speak your truth with clarity.

I stopped wearing crop tops. I stopped wearing sheer tops. I stopped wearing bikinis. I stopped wearing short shorts. Why? I was trained to believe that women my size didn’t have the right to wear those things.

One day I saw this woman about the same size as myself flaunting her beauty and sexiness. I was in awe. I realize that I was feeding myself toxic lies and it was time to detox the bullshit.

That’s when I decided to try naked yoga to get back to me again.

“I realize that I was feeding myself toxic lies and it was time to detox the bullshit.”

I thought I was doing something. I was naked and alone doing my poses. I was all body positive until I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The image I had in my head was different than I actually looked. If I wanted to do some true healing, I needed to be real with myself.

Did I really love my body?

I decided the answer was yes so I had to step how I showed up for myself up a few notches. I started posting more images of my body. I started wearing sexier clothing. And…I decided to teach naked yoga to others.

If I’m going to talk the talk then I needed to walk the walk.

Bridge Pose — Setu Bandha Sarvangasana Can be used as prep for deeper backbends or practiced with a prop as a restorative pose. This pose feels great after sitting at a desk all day.

What are the 3 lessons I learned from Naked Yoga?

I truly learned to love my body. All of it. Every roll, every fluff, and every jiggle. I love myself when my body is inflamed and movements hurt. I also love myself when I’m feeling like a million bucks. Loving my body has nothing to do with how I look or feel. It’s about what I know to be true. My body is beautiful, in spite of all it’s been through.

I really don’t give a fuck about social norms. The yogi aesthetic is skinny, vegan and damn near a contortionist. That’s not me. I’m also 45 and should dress like ladies “of a certain age”. Yeah, I’ve never been one to follow rules and I’m not about to start now.

I got my sexy back. I’ve never felt more powerful when I walk into a room. I know all eyes are on me. My confidence radiates inward and out into every space I occupy. You can’t say shit to me.

Why am I sharing this with you? There are some of you who lost your confidence, sexiness, and self-love. Maybe your ex was an ass and made you feel bad about yourself. Perhaps you’ve spent too much time on social media and got caught up in unrealistic comparison mode. Or your story sounds like mine and a chronic situation tried to steal your life.