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"Zazen is actually not complicated" - C.J. Beck

Hi,

I just wanted to share a few sentences I read in a book by C.J. Beck entitled "Nothing special". I was having a hard time understanding how to apply zazen practice to real life and, coincidentally, I found some inspiration and comfort in the following words (isn't is great when "accidents" like these happen? : )

"Zazen is actually not complicated. The real problem is, we don't want to do it. If my boyfriend begins to look at other women, how long am I going to be willing simply to experience that? We all have problems constantly, but our willingness just to be is very low on our list of priorities, until we have practiced long enough to have faith in just being, so that solutions can appear natuarally. Another mark of a maturing practice is the development of such trust and faith".

Perhaps the hardest thing to get across about Zazen ... and the aspect that chases most people away ... is that human beings really cannot tolerate what it means to just be, just open, allow, let go, not chase or do ... Just Sit. It is really not that different from my trying to get our two year old daughter to "just sit still" for a few minutes. It is so hard to get folks to realize how to sit as the fruition of all that need be in that moment, no other place to go or hole in need of fixing as we sit .... just being the very flowing of the flowing going! It is so hard just to fathom the Sacredness and Wholeness of Just This. Folks confuse "Just Sitting" with "just sitting around", and the "Mudra" in which we hold our hands with "just twiddling our thumbs". They confuse "Nothing Special" with "doing nothing special", and sitting in the Timeless free of the clock with "killing and wasting time".

You might think it is the easiest of all things ... just to tell people to stop and "give up the hunt" for a time ... that sitting is the one space in life where there is nothing to win, nothing to pursue, nothing to think about or plan in that short space when the bell rings (our way of finding a Treasure Always Present Yet Rarely Perceived).

But rather, people quit and walk away from Zazen ... much preferring to do something constructive, less boring, pursue some dream or goal, solve some problem, deal with things, figure something out, get to the promised land which is likely over the next hill ... or the next ... or the next. People do not like to just sit and let life go and flow for a few timeless minutes, enjoying the Promised Land where they sit.

People are also very attached to things, to anger and greed and thoughts of this and that and the other.

Sometimes I wish all my students were stones or trees or mountains. They already know how to sit without running after things or being filled with their problems. They are not angry or greedy, or live in comparison and division with the rest of the world. Our Zen Way is tricky, because it is about being a person of thoughts and feelings and feet with places to go ... and being the stones, trees and mountains ... all at once.

Zazen is Nothing Special ... which includes the "Special" of all things.

Gassho, J

PS - Joko Beck is always near the top of our suggested reading for folks around here ... you might also try "Everyday Zen: Love & Work". Although nothing to get, it seems there is always another book to read to tell us so!

Thank you Jundo for your wonderful reply. It made me think about the importance of trust in our practice and our own nature. We are thought since an early age to cultivate the unrealistic idea that we can think our way out of all problems (at least this os my experience). But when it comes to life there is no right amount of reasoning that will help us to figuring it out. If anything, reasoning can tell us at best that reasoning is not the way to go if we want understand who we are. Faith in our own nature starts to develop as soon as the mind runs out of schemes and abandons the idea that life is yet another problem to be solved...there is nothing to solve. Now if I could only find a consistent way to live these words in my own life that would be great

I find it liberating to write my thoughts down. Sharing them with other people that are likely to be on the same frequency as myself makes it even sweeter. Thanks for taking the time to read the scambled words I wrote at 430 am, well before I even had the chance to drink my coffee. Looking forward to your comments...

thank you andrea and jundo. I can really get bent out of shape complicating this. especially when it comes to dharma, philosophies, different traditions, etc. im finding it a lot easier to just sit and try to be present and mindful (for now, atleast). and I generally notice that when I do these things, that things go much smoother. if I look to deep into it I start to think its a waste of time and don't want to do it. so for now I will just sit just to sit.

thank you andrea and jundo. I can really get bent out of shape complicating this. especially when it comes to dharma, philosophies, different traditions, etc. im finding it a lot easier to just sit and try to be present and mindful (for now, atleast). and I generally notice that when I do these things, that things go much smoother. if I look to deep into it I start to think its a waste of time and don't want to do it. so for now I will just sit just to sit.

Originally Posted by jus

thank you, again. and im not sure if this is the right place for this question, but im having trouble with "just sitting", as opposed to other forms of meditation like "breath counting" or "insight meditation", where it feels like my brain is getting to do something. just sitting and facing the wall i start to feel a little bit nuts. any suggestions? thanks..

Hi Jus,

Yes, the little "self" just does not like having all its little crutches, distractions, amusements that feed it pulled away. Don't worry, this is actually the trickiest part of Shikantaza for everyone, not only you! Even after 30 years, there are such days for me too! As I wrote above:

Perhaps the hardest thing to get across about Zazen ... and the aspect that chases most people away ... is that human beings really cannot tolerate what it means to just be, just open, allow, let go, not chase or do ... [They can confuse] "Just Sitting" with "just sitting around", and the "Mudra" in which we hold our hands with "just twiddling our thumbs". They confuse "Nothing Special" with "doing nothing special", and sitting in the Timeless free of the clock with "killing and wasting time".

You might think it is the easiest of all things ... just to tell people to stop and "give up the hunt" for a time ... that sitting is the one space in life where there is nothing to win, nothing to pursue, nothing to think about or plan in that short space when the bell rings (our way of finding a Treasure Always Present Yet Rarely Perceived).

But rather, people quit and walk away from Zazen ... much preferring to do something constructive, less boring, pursue some dream or goal, solve some problem, deal with things, figure something out, get to the promised land which is likely over the next hill ... or the next ... or the next. People do not like to just sit and let life go and flow for a few timeless minutes, enjoying the Promised Land where they sit.

All I can say is that even learning something as simple as the natural balance of riding a bicycle or simple "staying afloat" of swimming can take time. However, once someone gets it, all really is child's play! Why not try to go back and forth to a little breath counting/observing and "open spacious awareness, on everything and nothing in particular", as described here ...

awsome! thanks jundo. after posting yesterday, i found a wealth of information on this site. im going to check out the links and videos and hopefully ill find what i need regarding shikantaza. ive also noticed that this issue arises for me mainly when ive been sitting with you guys, i think its because its a little bit longer than what im used to (10-15 mins twice daily on my own, and a lot of times in a chair) and the fact that i can see on my screen more experienced practitioners, and even though im worlds away i can still feel a little self conscious about my sitting lol. i try to bring focus back to the top of my palm, but then i either get wrapped up in thought or the anxiousness and frustration that arises.

which may lead me into another question. is it ever alright to go into "insight" mode? if feelings keep coming up, do i want to go into them? or the best way i can put it, somehow "become one" with them?

thanks again for your reply, jundo. i have a feeling im going to be online for a little doing research now..

awesome, those links were really helpful. I guess its just a case of the "beginners mind" here. a lot of my information about sitting zazen is a little dated, where it seemed that breath counting was the end-all-be-all. or else maybe they were just speaking to beginners. but ive noticed that most of the great teachers today hardly if ever recommend it. I even read something yesterday about if you start to get lost in thought, to not go back to breath, but to straighten your spine each time (ouch). it also seems that in most other practices, that breath counting (or awareness) is used solely to quiet the mind, in attempts to prep oneself for the "real meditation" (for lack of better terms). its also funny, that when I get lost in thought, your words about "there is no bad zazen" come to mind, and then I get lost in that. sort of like I already assume that im sitting a "bad zazen". and then that gives me reason to just slack off (man, I need a teacher with a hitting stick!). and youre right, if shikantaza was easy you guys would be out of a job, but also if it were easy, itd probably be not so much fun for me to continue to sit and learn more! gassho, Justin (sorry, "enter" key is broken on this comp.)