Tuesday, June 30, 2015

My sister had a stroke as I told you in a previous post. There were anxious moments as she underwent various treatments. Again I mentioned them in a previous post.

My daughter and her family stopped in to visit my sister on their way to a vacation destination. She called me and sounded a bit upset.

My daughter told me that one side of her aunt's head is still seriously swollen. The nurse told my daughter that my sister has a touch of dementia so not to be alarmed if she did not recognize people.

She did recognize her niece immediately and asked if my granddaughter was there. She was. They had a nice visit but my sister was weak and seemed to tire quickly.

Her conversation rambled a bit. There were times when my daughter was not certain if my sister was talking about our mother or my daughter's mother (me).

She was making motions like she was trying to wake someone up next to her. At times she thought it was her husband, other times her son, and sometimes nurses or aides. She said they needed somewhere to sleep because they got so tired.

My sister is still in the long term care facility. They do all sorts of therapy and testing. It seems as if they are taking good care of her.

My nephew visits every day. He has been telling me that she gets better every day. I am wondering how much of that is wishful thinking.

I cannot afford to visit her right now. I write her and my nephew reads the letters to her. Apparently she can have extremely short phone conversations. I need to figure out what I will say in a short amount of time. I also need to collect myself so I will not upset her.

Another nephew's wife made a collage of family photos. It is marvelous. They delivered it to her today.

This was partially an update and partially catharsis for me. Hope you don't mind.

Friday, June 26, 2015

When I was still working I was a union steward. I will tell you more about that but first I will tell you that I know the good side and the bad side of unions.

Unions are organizations designed to help workers obtain better working conditions from their employers. Some of these include fair pay, reasonable time limitations of hours worked, fairness of discipline and treatment in the work place, seniority rights, freedom from fear of dismissal without cause, and a grievance system to address problems in the work place.

In order to guarantee the working conditions the union and employer negotiate a contract which is either ratified by a vote of the workers or denied in the same way. Once an agreement is reached it is filed in the courts and becomes a legal document. Infringement of the rules set forth in the contract is a violation of the court.

Some of the things I feel are wrong with unions are that some have become as authoritarian as the employers they were designed to deal with. Some union officials make more money than officers of the companies. This money is paid from the dues collected from the workers.

Some unions do not fairly represent the employees who pay their wages. Some unions and their officials are content to collect salaries as they do little of anything except promote the union.

There are many unions. I will not name any. Locals are subdivisions of a larger union. The locals pay dues to the larger unions in order to have superior strength in larger numbers. These are powerful machines. They have accomplished much good for working people. They have caused problems at times. I am not making a statement for against unions. That is for you to decide for your own circumstances.

I was working in a union shop. I was hired as a part-time worker as was everyone in that store. It was a part of the contract with the union.

I accepted as many hours of work as I could get because that was how I supported myself. I was working at least 36 hours a week that way. Part-time work was 32 hours as stated in the contract. A full-time employee worked 40 hours per week.

As I was reading my contract I saw that if I worked at least 36 hours a week for 16 weeks the store was required to promote me to full time. I kept my mouth shut and after 16 weeks I went to my manager and asked for my promotion. She denied me as I expected.

I went to one of the union stewards for assistance. My store was supposed to have 7 stewards. At that time we had 3.

The first steward I talked to told me that everybody wanted full-time. It would be unfair for me to be promoted before others who hired in before me. She would not file a grievance. I went to another steward.

The new steward was surprised that the contract had a provision to make me full-time. However he did file a grievance. After a couple of weeks of no progress I called the supervisor in charge of several stores in our area. She said she would look into it.

After a couple of weeks I again called her. She no longer worked in my area. I was connected with the new supervisor. She would look into it. I called her in a couple of weeks. After a few months she no longer had my area.

I went through this routine with at least 6 supervisors assigned to my area. After a YEAR I called again because I was afraid that with a lapse of a year with nothing being done they would inform me that too much time had passed and my complaint had expired.

Guess who I talked to. It was the original superviaor! She had just been assigned to our area again. She even remembered my request for help.

"Hasn't this been taken care of yet?" was all she had to say. When she started to tell me that she would check into it I interrupted her.

"What do I have to do to get this taken care of? Do I have to sue the union?"

"OH DON'T DO THAT! Let me call you back."

I was full-time the following week. I should have made the threat earlier.

Someone said that my store needed another union steward. She thought I should apply. I did and was made steward. A union steward is simply an employee of the shop who addresses what workers view as wrongs.

A steward is the person in the workplace who listens to worker's complaints. Then they file a grievance and try to apply the part of the contract that is being violated to deny the worker's rights. The union then talks to management to try to solve the problem.

A steward is also required to attend regular union meetings and training sessions. The president of the local was fond of beginning each session by going around the room to introduce each steward and which store they represented. Then he would ask us why we became a steward.

The altruistic answers often amounted to the Miss Whatever characterization of "World Peace". He would smile and nod.

My turn came. I said that the union had screwed me over and I did not want that to happen to anyone else so I became a steward to try to make a difference.

After he caught his breath he nodded numbly. He stopped asking that question.

I have been a bit of a protester all my life so I enjoyed my activities with the union. I would like to think I accomplished some good.

I like to think that I also instilled a sense of social responsibility in my children. It is important to fight injustice and to help the net guy if he needs it. I think I was successful.

My youngest son was elected committeeman in his work place. That is the union liaison with the stewards. He made the mistake of letting workers have his personal phone number and was being constantly bombarded at home. Other than that he enjoys fighting the good fight.

His son, my oldest grandson, was hired to work in the same shop as my son. After about a year of watching the unfairness that angered him he became a union steward too. He is a black-and-white person. A thing is either right or wrong. Grays have no place in his life. He also enjoys helping theose who feel they cannot help themselves.

Unions came into being because of reprehensible working conditions. Workers banded together to demand better treatment. Because of unions we now have a 40 hour work week and a lot of other provisions to protect workers and their jobs.

While I do not necessarily agree with some of the things unions do or do not do I believe that without them working conditions could rapidly decline into what they once were. What to do? I wish I had the answer.

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

In today's world most families have both parents working. It can be really difficult for the parents to juggle all the things a family has to do. Most of the time a little bit of help is needed. If the help can be a family member it is even better.

I often helped when I could. I worked the midnight shift so I was home during the day. Besides most of the activities were fun for me as well as helping make life a little easier for others.

My older two grandchildren went to a church sponsored school. They were not required to provide transportation to and from the school so the did not. Depending on work schedules there were times my son and daughter-in-law could not take them to school.

Sometimes they could take them but needed someone to pick them up at the end of the school day. Other days they could pick them up but could not get them there. Often they needed both a delivery and a pick up. I was happy to help.

The second two had the same situation. The school bus was available but their parents were not. They were at work before it arrived and not home until after the children were home. They needed to have someone take them to the bus in the morning and pick them up from the bus in the afternoon.

Each set of two consisted of an older brother and a sister. The brother would go to regular school while the sister was in pre-school. That made it even more fun.

There were other school activities that parents were unable to attend. One time my daughter-in-law asked me if I would mind taking her place at school. Parents were required to assist a certain number of times each semester.

That particular time I helped making lunches. I was in charge of making apple cobbler for all the school. Then I passed out milk when they got lunch and helped clean up after. It was interesting.

School outings also needed parents to be available to help herd the children. My oldest grandson had a tour of a local grocery store. It was a fun tour but I worked in a store that also sold groceries so I was a bit bored.

My oldest granddaughter was in high school when they went to watch a symphony performance. I was happy to attend. I will grab any chance to listen to music. Some of her friends were not happy with me because I expected them to behave properly but other than that it was enjoyable.

Going to the apple orchard is a yearly expedition. The school takes several grades at a time. The children ride on a wagon into the apple orchard and are allowed to pick an apple. They watch cider being made. Then they drink a small cup of cider and have an apple or pumpkin cookie.

My second granddaughter is a musician. She had to spend a lot of time rehearsing and practicing. Someone had to see to it that she was there and that she made it home safely. Often her friends were in the same predicament as she was so I would have extras too.

Sports also needed someone to deliver and pick up. If practices were not attended the child could not play in the game. Besides attending as many games as I could I took my turns at getting the kids to practices.

When he was very young my second grandson was as crazy about dinosaurs as most boys at that age. He went a step further though. He learned as much as anyone I have ever known about dinosaurs. He was asked by his teacher to teach the class when they were studying dinosaurs. He did so well that other teachers including the teachers at his sister's pre-school were "booking" him.

Of course he needed someone to drive him and help him with the many plastic dinosaurs he used as props. And he always concluded his lesson by giving each child a plastic dinosaur to keep. It was great fun but also quite a chore.

But it was not always fun things that needed a little help. My daughter-in-law had a bad wisdom tooth but she did not want to go to the dentist. When it acted up her mouth would not open far enough for her to eat. She was stubborn and went through several bouts of this until she finally made an appointment.

As I was driving her there she said that her mouth was working agin so we could go back home. I took her to the dentist anyway.

There was a wait in the office so she decided that she would not wait. I made her wait. She was so happy to have that tooth removed. Her mouth works very well now thank you.

My daughter-in-law is good in a crisis... unless it involves her children and blood. Then she faints. We tease her unmercifully but we make sure that there is someone else to be with the doctor and patient. She gratefully waits just outside the door to the room as the doctor repairs things. Then she is fine.

My oldest grandson had a mole growing on the back of his head. When the doctor looked at it he made an appointment to remove it. Of course my daughter-in-law could not be present. I told her to go to work and I would take him. It was minor. He was very brave. He did need a stitch or to to close the wound. I took him to lunch.

Family is a valuable resource. We help each other when needed and enjoy each other when possible.

Friday, June 19, 2015

I am an avid reader. I was read to as a small child and
encouraged to read by both my parents. The school I went to in
kindergarten and first grade was teaching students to read in
kindergarten and in first grade we were reading from the third grade
reading book we used in the school I attended in third grade.

I
did not go to a special school. It was the public school in a small
town in Nebraska. All the children who attended school learned the same
things I did. Children are like sponges and will absorb whatever is
offered.

So I learned very early that books are a form
of entertainment. You can learn about life from some books. Some books
teach you how to behave.

Some books tell about
historical events or people. I really enjoy knowing why things happened
in the past. I cannot help but wonder if we paid a little more to the
mistakes of the past maybe, just maybe, we would know how to avoid them
now.

There are books that look to the future. The various authors speculate about the way life will be.

Fantasy
books have fanciful worlds full of fairies and ogres and other
mythological creatures. Or the worlds are different from this one and
the people in the books deal with problems we do not have. Or maybe you
are on a trip in outer space or inner space.

If you
have something you need to fix you can get a book that will explain how.
It can help diagnose the problem and tell you what parts and tools you
will need to make it good as new.

You must get the idea
by now. A book is the equivalent of a trip to another place. It is a
valuable tool. It is an education. It is a friend.

You
can get completely lost in the story. My son likes to tell of the time
he was reading one of the Wheel of Time books. He was reading about some
of the good guys escaping from some of the bad guys. Suddenly from
nowhere was a bolt of lightning that blinded and deafened the enemy. The
lightning was so surprising and loud that my son actually jumped. The
story felt real to him.

Many books are very well
written. I think that when I read Silence of the Lambs I was so
impressed with the artistry of the words. I felt that there was not one
unnecessary or wasted word in the whole book.

I have
read so many books about the American Revolution and about the Civil
War. Some are biographies and some are historical accounts. Sometimes
they contradict other books I have read. But I have a real feeling for
the way things were. I feel like I have a truer understanding of the
reasons both wars were fought. I understand why people from either side
felt the way they did. And I have come to admire many people from both
sides of the conflicts.

I encourage everyone to read.
You can choose something light if you like. There is something soothing
about reading a nice little story. My youngest sister was not much of a
reader and decided she should be. She began with romance novels because
they were easy to read and not too long. Now she reads a lot.

Go
get yourself a book. Find a nice comfortable quiet place. Have
something to sip on as you read. Go to a place you have long wished to
visit. Enjoy yourself.

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

My son got one of those DNA kits. All he had to do was spit (pardon me) into the tube, seal everything, and mail it in to the company. After a suitable wait the company sends email giving the results of your ancestry.

As you might have guessed from this blog I am so interested with family; where we came from, who we are, and even who we can be in the future. That is why I write this. I want my children and grandchildren to know how we fit into this world.

My family stories tell part of the story. I can tell the funny stories and the sad stories that give a little insight into the personalities of individual members of the family. I can give a little insight into why we are a loud boisterous bunch. I can mention physical and personality quirks that seem to belong to different members of the family beginning with some before me and continuing after me.

The DNA results are not quite as complete as we had hoped. There were many general areas that ancestors could be found. I suppose that could be because of the movements of groups of people in earlier times.

However some results were more specific. My son is 3% Neanderthal. Interesting. They say most people of European heritage have some Neanderthal genetically but 3% is on the high side.

And he is 0.1% Japanese. Where did that come from? As far as I knew we were mostly Northern European but DNA says that while we are Northern European that is not all there is.

The good thing is that since my children have the same heritage this works for all of them. The others do not have to send away for theirs unless they want to. However if I want to know mine I will have to spend the money. I may just do that.

There is also a program that comes along with the DNA test results. It is for a family tree. I have wanted to do one for a long time but I did not know how to start. I know there are programs you can buy but I felt they would be a large expense for what little I know about where we come from.

So I decided to help my son fill it out with what information I have. He started by placing his father's and my names along with his brothers and sister in the chart. Then he asked for help.

I know a lot of birthdays and a few birth places. What really surprised me was that I have a lot more information than I thought I had. I can go back to my great-grandparents and even some great-greats.
It is time consuming and maybe even a little addictive.

I also came across a website called findagrave.com. You can search a cemetery for family names there. It has been helpful and I found it quite by accident.

So I have been busily filling in the chart. I have not even begun to work on my husband's side of the family but I am anxious to get it ready. Then I can surprise my sister-in-law with what I have and ask for some help with the rest. It will be something nice for us to leave our family.

Also this program has an upgrade that you can pay for. It will connect you to family trees that contain any of the members of your own family tree. That way you can extend even further. I have already been notified of a couple of members who are part of other trees. Two of them I knew had done family trees so I am excited.

I am planning a trip to the historical society in a small town I lived in as a child. It holds information for the whole county. Most of my relatives lived in that county at one time or another.

I also will visit the graves of one set of grandparents and a bunch of other relatives who are in a local cemetery. Often spouses and children are buried nearby.

I am looking forward to digging ever deeper and discovering more of who I am.

Friday, June 12, 2015

I can sleep almost any place. I most certainly prefer a nice bed but I have been camping and I can sleep there too.

At the same time I like my bed and my room. I have everything I need in there. My bed is made up the way I like it. I can watch the television shows I want to watch. I have my electronic book reader and my books.

I used to aggravate my daughter-in-law. They had purchased a new set of living room furniture. There was something about the couch. Every time I sat down I was asleep within a matter of minutes. I still think she believed I waited to go visit them to catch a nap. The couch was no more comfortable than any other as far as I could tell. I just fell asleep there.

My daughter and I decided to drive and see my mother and sister. It was about an 8 hour drive. When my daughter-in-law said she would like to go and take my grandchildren who were babies I was happy to have the extra company. She and my daughter could take turns keeping me awake.

After my daughter and I picked them up we drove about 3 minutes to the interstate highway. My grandson and granddaughter were happily cooing to each other in the back seat. Their mother was between them sound asleep. I looked over at my daughter so we could have a quick chuckle. My daughter was sleeping just as soundly! So much for company.

The babies stayed awake most of the trip which we were taking at night to avoid traffic. The girls slept soundly until I woke them up about 50 miles from our destination and told them I needed someone to either drive or keep me awake.

The man I married could sleep wherever he was when he felt tired. A bed, a couch, the ground, the greasy floor at work, the backseat of the car, or the floor at home were just a few of the places he slept.

I have mentioned before that my husband had a habit of drinking too much. Of course drinking also made him sleepy. The bars he liked were too far from where we lived to allow him to make it home. Many nights he did not come home.

A lot of people would ask me if I worried about him not coming home at night. I would laugh and tell them that even if he did not come home I knew where he was.

He would either go to his brother's house or my parent's house. It would be late so he just let himself in and made himself comfortable.

My father did not sleep well if he was not home in his own bed. He slept hard and snored loud. When he awoke he jumped straight up to stand beside the bed. No casually rolling over and sitting on the edge of the bed to wake up for him.

My husband had taken a job in another state so of course the children and I moved there too. My parents missed us and wanted to spend Christmas with us so they and my younger brother and sister came to visit.

Daddy got off work on Friday and drove home to pack the car and grab a quick meal. They then drove all night to get to our house.

When they got there I fixed breakfast. Then we opened Christmas gifts. The kids all had a good time showing off what they got to everybody. They were especially happy to have Grandpa there.

Late in the afternoon as I was preparing supper my father turned to my mother and said, "You ready to head for home?"

He was tired finally and wanted to be in his own bed. Mom made him stay for the whole weekend but I could tell he was anxious to be home.

My oldest son also likes his own bed. Other than having the dog in there with him he wants no company. He likes the feeling of having no one able to intrude on his rest.

I guess when it comes to it a person should sleep wherever he/she is most comfortable.

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

My third brother was about three years old. He had a morning routine. After the rest of us went to school he was given a penny. Mom watched him walk up to the corner and the woman in the store watched him walk the rest of the way to the store where he bought a piece of candy. Then she watched him to the corner and Mom watched him the rest of the way home.

Once at home my brother would watch the morning children's programs. This was his morning ritual every day.

One morning he hurriedly told my mother to turn the television off because he had to go to the bathroom. He did not want to miss anything so he would have her turn it back on when he was ready.

Mom thought it was hilarious. But when you think about it, it makes perfect sense to a three-year-old. If the TV is not on neither is the program.

Now that happened in the middle 1950's. The town we lived in had 1, count it, 1 television channel available. It was a combination of the three networks. Whatever programs the heads of the station chose were what we watched.

Many years passed. We had a new way to watch movies on television. VCR's had been invented. You hooked the machine up to the television. Then you chose the movie you wished to see. There was a cartridge you injected into the machine. After a bit of fiddling with buttons you could watch the movie in the luxury of your own home.

VCR's were so simple a child could operate them. My nephew enjoyed watching movies. Unfortunately he was also a mischievous child. My sister had to invest in a new DVD machine after my nephew inserted a Hershey bar and then a cartridge.

Then came the DVD player. Instead of those bulky cartridges you had a flat disc to insert into the machine attached to your television. The discs were not going to stick in the machine. They were also much easier to store. They took up so much less space.

Someone came up with the idea to store programs seen on television. If you were not at home when your favorite program came on you could program your DVR to save it for you to watch at your leisure.

Or what if there were two programs on at the same time and they were both important to you? You could watch one and record one to watch later. Perhaps you could not be at home. Record them both for later. Progress is a wonderful thing.

Now I have a DVR that will allow for 5 programs at the same time! Imagine that. There are three televisions in my home. One in the living room, one in my room, and one in my son's room. Each TV in bedrooms is connected to the main DVR in the living room.

I can watch programs that I have saved in my room before I go to sleep. If I see something I would like to record for another time I can issue the order from my room.

I can search for my favorite actors or an upcoming program to set a recording so I do not forget about it. I can even set series recordings for programs that I watch weekly or daily. There are even programs like baseball that are seasonal. If I set a series recording for my favorite team the games will begin recording when the new season begins. I do not have to reset the series recordings.

Technology makes all this possible. And it is such a frivolous thing. If I were to miss an episode of my favorite soap opera I would survive. If I miss one baseball game out of the season I would probably live. But I do not have to.

If all this is possible just think what else can be done. Most of these improvements were not even imagined once. Now we realize that if we can imagine something we can make it so. Marvelous.

Friday, June 5, 2015

Most parents have had to take part in raising funds for some activity for the children. Baseball teams, dance classes, and even school programs cost money. Fundraisers are held to help pay for these things.

At school bake sales were the easiest and most popular. Cupcakes, cookies, and brownies would be available to the children and teachers for a small fee. The baked goods were dutifully cooked by parents.

The hard part of a bake sale was finding parents willing to man the table to sell those cupcakes. "I have to work", or "I have babies to take care of", or any excuse seemed to work. For everyone but me.

I would take my smaller children with me. They had small toys and books to keep them occupied while Mom sold baked items. We actually had a decent time. And I took them to lunch at a nearby cafe so the children were happy.

My grandchildren often sold candy for fundraisers. A big box of overpriced candy bars was given to each child. My grandchildren took two boxes, That was because Grandma would take a box to work and sell it. Sometimes I took a couple because more than one grandchild had a fundraiser.

What I would do is set the box in the break area. People like a snack at break time. In the box I placed an envelope with my name and the reason for the fundraiser. Also the price was included. People could help themselves and I did not have to approach anyone and try to "guilt" them into buying. It worked very well and I sold a lot of candy that way.

A newer type of fundraiser is selling pizza kits. Inside the box are the makings for individual pizzas. To make them you cover the dough with sauce, cheese, and pepperoni. Then you bake them for a few minutes and , voila, pizza for one.

They seem to be very popular. I know they were selling a lot of them for a while.

One of my co-workers had a daughter attending a school for students planning on entering the field of arts. That could be painting, broadcasting, or movies. For their fundraiser they sold pies.

These pies came frozen. Some were fruit pies that had to be baked. Some were cream pies that only had to be defrosted. They were delicious. Unfortunately the pies were expensive.

For the Mothers' Club of my daughter's dance class we were trying to decide which fundraiser we would have. I was tired of selling candy and baking cupcakes.

I suggested that we do something a bit more personal. Mother's Day was coming soon. Why not give personalized phone calls? The person purchasing the greeting would let us know what time they wished us to call. That way they could stand ready with flowers and/or candy to present after the call.

We sold a lot of calls. And they were very well received. We had several poems that had nice sentiments that we read and then we told them who had sent them the call.

I called the mother of a young man who was a friend of my youngest brother. I had known him since he was a little boy.

So at the appointed time I called. I read a nice poem and told her it was from her son. She thanked me and hung up.

After a time my phone rang. It was my brother's friend. He told me that he had almost called right after I spoke to his mother to yell at me.

Apparently she was so touched by the wishes sent to her by her son that she began to cry uncontrollably. When he tried to find out what was wrong all she could do was point to the phone. He thoought I had said something to hurt her.

When she finally calmed down enough to talk she told him that was the nicest thing he had ever done for her. She gave him a huge hug and kiss. Then he was touched. He just wanted to thank me.

It just goes to show that some of the nicest gifts are from the heart not the pocketbook.

It has been a while since I was involved in raising funds. I am grateful for that. I am also grateful for the experiences when I was involved.

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

I was married to a strange person. He was interesting but at times so strange.

One Saturday afternoon we were watching an old movie on television. He fell asleep with his head on my lap.

All of a sudden he sat up screaming, "LOOK OUT, LOOK OUT!!!"

I frantically tried to see what I was in danger from as I tried to shrink at the same time. I was screaming, "WHAT? WHAT?"

"Don't you see it?"

"See what?"

" That chain coming at us!"

What? I was ducking and weaving and bobbing to get away from an imaginary chain? He was having a bad dream about a loose chain in a warehouse that was falling and going to hit us. At least he was covering me to protect me.

When he woke up later I told him about the incident and he said he almost remembered the dream.

On occasion he would walk in his sleep. I would normally just guide him back to the place he had been sleeping and tell him about it later.

Of course he denied doing it. He thought I was making it up. So one day when he got up I let him go.

I watched him carefully but I did not interfere in any way. The children were laughing the whole time.

My husband walked from the couch to the front door. He opened the front door and went through it. We had an enclosed porch. He crossed that and went through that door, down the front steps and on outside.

We lived on the corner so I readied myself in case he tried to cross the street. As he reached the corner of the sidewalk he suddenly looked up and got a sheepish look on his face. He was now awake.

He turned the corner and walked to the backyard gate. I went in the front door. He came in through the back door.

My husband was furious. He said we would have let him walk right out into the street. We laughed because we knew he was in no danger.

There was no guessing some of the things my husband would do. One time he decided that he could sell to some of the marijuana smokers.So we went on vacation to visit his parents.

While there he and his brother went out and cut down a bunch of the hemp weed that grows wild here. When back home in the big city he began the "curing" process.

He and his brother made drying racks and put them in his brother's basement. Then they spread the plants out on the racks and left them there.

In a couple of weeks they went down to check on it. All those hemp plants had turned moldy. They simply turned them over.

Eventually the plants dried. They flaked the leaves off. They crumbled them a bit and put them in baggies.

Do you know that some people will smoke anything? My husband and his brother actually made a small bit of money on the venture. Thankfully they never tried it again.

Cleaning car parts in my kitchen sink was a favorite irritation of his. Irritation to me that is. It drove me crazy.

But the biggest "What the ...." of all was the day I came home and found a transmission on my couch!
A transmission!

My darling husband had decided he wanted to watch TV while he rebuilt his transmission. He did not want to get grease and transmission fluid all over the floor so he put it on the couch. Logical right? Even more strange is that he found some idiot to help him carry the transmission in.