Principal jokes

On little Larry's first day of first grade, he raised his hand as soon as the teacher came into the room and said, "I don't belong here, I should be in third grade!"

The teacher looked at little Larry's records and told him to please take his seat.

Not five minutes passed when little Larry stood up again and said, "I don't belong here, I should be in the third grade!"

Larry did this a few more times before the principal came along and the teacher explained Larry's problem. The principal and the first grade teacher told little Larry that if he could answer some questions that they could decide in which grade he belonged. Well, they soon discovered that Larry knew all the state capitals and country capitals that the principal could think of.

The teacher suggested they try some biology questions ... "What does a cow have 4 of but a woman has only 2?" asked the teacher.

"Legs!" Larry immediately replied. "What does a man have in his pants that a woman doesn't?" asked the teacher.

According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom.

That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day, the girls would put them back. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night.

To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

A boy sees his penis and wonders what it is. He asks his mom, "Mommy, what is a penis for?" Their mom, not wanting to tell him about sex yet, says "It's for making lemonade honey."

Soon after, he asks his mom "What is a vagina for?" His mom says "It's for making raspberry juice honey."

Later, he asks his mom "What is a breast for?" She says "It's for making milk honey."

The next day the boy's principal comes over. Mom serves him lemonade, raspberry juice and milk. The principal asks them where did they get drinks that delicious. Before the mom could answer, the boy says: "We got lemonade from a penis, raspberry juice from a vagina, and the milk from a breast."