Foundation for the Preservation of the Mahayana Tradition

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It was dark, maybe 9 p.m., and there was something wriggling on the path going around Bouddha Stupa. It was a baby jet black snake! We got it onto an open piece of cardboard with a little difficulty. Rinpoche wanted it to come with us around the stupa. Rinpoche gave it the name, “Thubten Tharpkye.” For the next 10 circumambulations of the stupa (he /she) got some really good karma. At the end, after dedications (ending around midnight — almost no one is around at that time), we had to say good bye to Thubten Tharpkye. We placed him safely in the drainage system from where he must have come and will spend the rest of his life.

A few days later we were circumambulating Swayambhu Stupa around the base where there are so many stupas, some are very large. It is quite amazing. We usually go after dark when it is quieter and people have finished doing kora. But we walk on the road and so you have to be really careful of the Nepali cars and trucks racing along with horns blaring. Rinpoche walks slow and you have to take care to balance him as the road has holes and cars and trucks try to pass as close as they can to you. Sometimes you have to move quickly out of their way! We do one circumambulation (3 km). The last time this took nearly four hours with the stops to make offerings and prayers. We always stop at the large (about 20 ft high), very beautiful Guru Rinpoche statue and Rinpoche chants prayers.

One night Rinpoche was just finishing prayers to Guru Rinpoche when there were sounds from the dark behind us. They say there are a lot thieves and drunks around after it gets dark. I looked around and could see someone lying on the ground in the dark and moving. It sounded like a woman but the noise coming from her was strange and not words that could be understood. Then to her left was a man in rags looking in really bad shape, really out of it. The old woman started to come towards us wailing strangely, the man was keeping his distance. Rinpoche asked me to offer them 100 rupees each. I only had 50 rupees (in change) for each and gave that. Then Rinpoche, in a very gentle ceremonious way, offered to each of them long beautiful khatas. To the man he offered a long blue khata and to the woman he offered a long green one. Then Rinpoche offered a long red one to the Guru Rinpoche statue. We then moved on slowly to complete the kora.

Now it is nearly 4 months since Rinpoche had a stroke, we are doing our best in changing circumstances to keep the discipline of physio and physical exercises going as well as medication for the control of the diabetes and blood pressure. In terms of Rinpoche’s progress it is slow but continues to be positive. There is more use of the right arm and leg, the arm is taking longer but according to doctors this is expected. The speech seems to be improving slowly also and Rinpoche uses chanting prayers as the exercise for the mouth rather than what the speech therapist normally gives. The difficult and complicated chanting takes quite a bit of effort but seems to be working … and of course much more inspiring (to Rinpoche) than the normal phrases.

We have had a new leg brace made which allows Rinpoche better leg movement when walking, so now we use part of the high quality brace made in Australia (A$2,000) with the brace made here (3,200 rs … about $35 dollars) and it seems we have a good arrangement for the next phase of development in helping the right leg. The right arm and hand is more complicated and depends a lot on Rinpoche using it as much as he can … to retrain it, so if you get something signed by Rinpoche and you can’t read it… then you know it has been signed by Rinpoche.

Thank you to everyone for all your understanding and support in so many ways,

Lama Zopa Rinpoche turning a prayer wheel with great effort using his right hand. Rinpoche does 3 koras at Boudhanath stupa walking (with help), and then does 7 koras in the wheelchair, each time stopping to turn the prayer wheel, using his right hand.

Rinpoche is doing well with his recovery. Now the main emphasis is on keeping a strict daily discipline of exercise, massage specializing in clearing the blockages for helping to restore normal use of the right side) and physio work. The discipline in the past has been interrupted here for various reasons … now we need to be even more strict as we have been warned that the optimum time for restoring Rinpoche’s physical condition to normal is quickly passing … the next few months are critical.

Rinpoche has a full day of exercise etc. starting with the physio coming at 7.45 am … there are some breaks through the day for Rinpoche to do prayers etc. … then in the evening Rinpoche does korwa at either Swoyambhu or Bodha stupa… Rinpoche believes this is one of the best activities for purification as well as physical exercise, of course it gets interrupted sometimes due rain … monsoon, still sometimes Rinpoche does korwa in the rain.

Our request to those who would like to visit Rinpoche is … please not in the next few months, of course if it was just 1 or 2 visits it would be fine but many would like to visit and then the schedule goes out the window as Rinpoche will not say no… he very much focuses on others.

Osel arrived at Kopan on Monday morning to see Lama Lhundrup and stayed one week. It had been 12 years since Osel was last at Kopan. Osel recognized a lot of the older monks immediately and there was a really good connection. It didn’t seem to matter in the least that he was now a lay person and dressed cool!

Osel is on the floor, flat on his back beside my desk, thinking about Rinpoche’s request to give a talk to all the Kopan monks and wearing a chuba (Rinpoche had one made for him). He says he doesn’t like to be pushed or pressured into doing things but it seems he is in the process of coming to terms with Rinpoche’s request although it appears hard. In the end he does give the talk. All the monks are present as well as Lama Lhundrup (a huge effort to come to this, his cancer is quite advanced) and Rinpoche. Rinpoche gave a short talk first, and then asked Osel to speak. Osel gave the talk in Tibetan (very good Tibetan). He gave “modern” advice and the monks gave a very warm response. They seem to want more! Osel said he was more than happy with his visit to Kopan. It was, “More than perfect,” he said!

Osel had discussions with Rinpoche about Essential Education (formerly Universal Education). He is quite involved, very interested and will be making a video of the upcoming Essential Education event in France. Rinpoche wanted the name changed to Essential Wisdom, Osel wanted “education” in the name. Lots of discussion. The next day Osel said, “How about Universal Wisdom Education and we can call it, ‘U WE.’ ‘U’ and ‘WE,’ get it!?” Alison Murdoch, director of Essential Education, was very happy with the news.

Over the last week Rinpoche hasn’t been regular in the physio and exercise, I guess it was a bit of an experiment from Rinpoche’s side but also due to business with other programs. The physio came this morning (after 1 week absence) and confirmed that generally the muscles lost their tone and this is due to not exercising them regular and many times in the day. So again it requires a lot of discipline mostly from Rinpoche’s side to keep moving/training the muscles in every part of the right side … even all the facial ones … as over the last week even the speech has deteriorated. For a diabetic the physio says it is more difficult as the muscles become fatigued quicker, so requires more repetition for shorter periods also rest in between. And even Rinpoche can walk the 3 kms around Swayambhu much of that time can be that he becomes lazy in the way the right leg is used … swinging it from the hip rather than bending at the knee in a forward action. So we have to have Rinpoche stop regularly rest and then start again … working quality rather quantity.

Then the need to focus on balance and coordination … as well as speed to react with the right muscles. All this has to be worked into normal daily actions all the time and this requires most of all Rinpoche’s participation and cooperation. It is hard for Rinpoche as he is not so familiar and disciplined with physical exercise … as well it requires more effort and repetition for a diabetic … interspersed with short periods of rest.

This morning the physio (he is very good and Rinpoche listens to him!) came at 7-45 am (his normal time for a session) … he expects Rinpoche to be rested in the morning … but in fact Rinpoche has been doing prayers/meditating most of the time thru the night… so not rested … the body is a little tired and not responding well to the exercises … so change of strong habits … again not easy.

Rinpoche finished a 10 day course of acupuncture a week ago and will not continue more at this time.

Khadro la is back in Nepal and is doing massage and her physio style … similar to the physio but more aggressive! Interesting to see the similarities … Khadro la is very confident in what she does and Rinpoche seems to respond well.

In the background we have 4 western doctors overseeing from a distance Rinpoche’s progress with the blood pressure and blood sugar levels. Blood pressure is getting better (with western medication) and is reasonable now; also the sugar levels are better but using insulin injections 3 times a day.

The big challenge at present and for the next several months is the discipline with regular physio and exercise through the day, every day, so Rinpoche needs the space and conditions to do that. This is the reason why Rinpoche has not been accepting appointments. Still Rinpoche puts effort into the necessary organizational work and responsibilities which he has a lot of energy for.

With the cutest shy smile and deep, beautiful dimples he says, “To say hello.” (The incarnation of Geshe Lama Konchog is 8 years old and small for his age, but smart as the ace of spades!)

Lama Zopa Rinpoche says quietly to me, “I think he is a little worried about me and just coming to check.”

They chatted between themselves for an hour and looked at a short video of Maratika, the cave where Guru Rinpoche achieved immortality. The big rinpoche and the small rinpoche (did I mention who is as smart as the ace of spades?)

A few days later Phuntsok Rinpoche came to see Lama Zopa Rinpoche again. He replied this time, “No reason, just want to see.” He just wanted to say hello and make an offering. Lama Zopa Rinpoche gave the khata back with one hand carefully over the head of the smiling little rinpoche and then asked me to double the money in the offering envelope and give it back to Phuntsok Rinpoche.

The little rinpoche, smiling, asked if his friend can come in and make an offering. Rinpoche said OK. Then, this little monk – even smaller and so close to the ground! – came in and offered a khata and offering to big rinpoche. Rinpoche asked me to double the offering and he gave it back to the very small monk. The two children both smiled and left after a little conversation.

Last night Rinpoche was doing a lot of prayers, slowly as his mouth has difficulty pronouncing the words. Rinpoche wanted to go down to spend some time with Lama Lhundrup to do prayers together and give a lung. Lama Lhundrup does not move much these days and is very quiet. I asked Kunkyen if Lama Lhundrup was OK as Rinpoche wanted to come down.

Kunkyen checked and said, “OK.”

I went up and explained to Rinpoche, “OK.”

Rinpoche started to do some preparation and then in the next minute Lama Lhundrup had come upstairs and was waiting outside, respectfully saying, “Rinpoche can’t come down, I must come up.” (Keep in mind that Lama Lhundrup’s cancer is quite advanced.)

Then proceeded a beautiful dance – the movement between two gracious lamas: one having advanced cancer, the other having had a stroke not long ago, the right side still not working. They both acted humbly, graciously and quietly; the feeling was very calm and peaceful. Awkwardly, Rinpoche tried moving his text and with slurred speech gave the lung with Lama Lhundrup sitting opposite slightly bent over, very still and quiet. It didn’t take long. And then they both parted.

“I can’t move,” says Rinpoche. “Why?” asks the physiotherapist. “Ants! I will tread on the ants.” So starts the debate between Rinpoche and Rinpoche’s Nepalese physiotherapist, Rajesh: Rajesh doesn’t understand why Rinpoche is so concerned about the ants and treading on one or two of them while he is doing his exercises. Rinpoche gives a brief explanation on compassion. Rajesh accepts. We gently remove the ants and Rinpoche continues to do his exercises.

Rajesh has been working with Rinpoche for about 10 days now and they are developing a good relationship. Rajesh is very good at what he does and has helped a number of Westerners here in Nepal. This morning (Rajesh comes every morning at 7:45 a.m. for one hour) after the physiotherapy session finished, Rinpoche answered Rajesh’s question about the main difference between Buddhism and Christianity. Rinpoche answered in 10 minutes. And then Rajesh had to go to his next client.

There is a lot of laughter during the session (Rajesh tells the jokes and Rinpoche keeps laughing) but at the same time Rajesh definitely keeps control of the session. It works very well.

Rinpoche is also spending time checking and seeing what can be done for Khenrinpoche Lama Lhundrup. Lama Lhundrup has good care here at the monastery with his attendants and Jo, a nurse and palliative care specialist who is a student of Lama Lhundrup from New Zealand. The Tibetan doctor visits him regularly and Rinpoche is attending to the spiritual aspects of the healing: blessing water, prayer sessions with the monks, pujas, etc.

Every now and again Rinpoche says about his own situation, “This will take time … have to wait for the karma to finish … it will take time.” Since the time in the hospital Rinpoche has been saying this. This morning I asked Rinpoche, “How long?” Rinpoche said, “Can’t say, maybe six months, maybe longer.”

Last night Rinpoche circumambulated Bouddha Stupa three times by himself and then about 10 times in the wheelchair. Rinpoche always stops at the two bigger prayer wheels and turns these with effort and difficulty with his right hand – it’s good exercise! Rinpoche said circumambulating Bouddha and Swayambhunath Stupas is very helpful for the mind. Rinpoche is really keen on circumambulating: the first night it was raining, so we did so in the rain. Most of the time we circumambulate late at night as it is quiet then.

Rinpoche is doing well and still in Nepal. Rinpoche is walking without aid now though someone has to walk close behind in case Rinpoche stumbles. Rinpoche has to drag the right leg a little and use his hip a little to swing his leg around to make a step but quite an improvement as he is independent. When we leave the gompa and return he has about 57 steps go down and up … that is hard and needs a lot of care to manage.

Right arm has more movement now but hand still has no energy to hold anything and arm has little energy to support in normal activity.

Speech is slowly improving right side of mouth little movement.

Rinpoche’s day is quite full, starting at 6:30 am practicing movement, 7:45 am physio session, then massage, afternoon is movements and then acupuncture and every evening is circumambulation of Bodha stupa or Swayambhu. So quite a full day.

Rinpoche is quite happy and eager with trying to get back to normal physical health. Many times a little too eager! Sense of humor seems even better than before, especially about his own situation … Sometimes he bursts out laughing about trying to do some exercise and it isn’t working.

Friday June 3, Bendigo, Australia: After discussion between Rinpoche, Khadro-la and myself, we decided that Khadro-la will leave tomorrow for Nepal.

After long and thorough discussions, it was decided that Rinpoche also should go to Nepal ASAP. (We had planned to be in Bendigo for sometime so Rinpoche could stabilize, continuing with the physiotherapy, etc.) After some quick checking, we saw that we could get a flight on June 6, but it meant a lot had to be organized, including discussion with the doctors and the hospital, getting clear on what it means for Rinpoche to travel, taking insulin, etc. After a lot of work we arrived at Melbourne airport. We rented a small 12-seater bus because Osel and Gomo Tulku Rinpoche were also departing. (They stayed a few days there and probably are now back in Europe.)

At the airport we ran into trouble at the check-in, which is not unusual, except the additional issue that they wanted to weigh our hand luggage with a restriction of 7 kg (15 lb)! Our carry-ons are usually at least 20 kg (44 lb) each with texts, prayer wheels, etc., so that was very hard. Then we had too many bags and it was going to cost a fortune. Then they asked us for a letter from the doctor saying Rinpoche was OK to fly, which we didn’t have! We had letters for the needles, insulin, arrangements for wheelchair service, etc., but no letter to say Rinpoche was OK to fly. And the airline said we couldn’t fly without it! So there was a lot of last minute re-shuffling and re-organizing of luggage and calls to the doctor for a letter to be faxed through to the airline. It all was eventually worked out except that some luggage got left behind.

Lama Lhundrup, June 2011. Photo by Ven. Roger Kunsang.

So here we are now in Nepal. Yesterday, Rinpoche was offered a special two-day long life puja at Kopan, organized by Khadro-la and Pari (Dagri) Rinpoche. Serkong Dorje Chang also attended, spontaneously appearing that morning. Lama Lhundrup attended even though he’s not well. Lama Zopa Rinpoche managed to walk down the steps (and there are a lot of steps!) Rinpoche is very determined to walk unaided and he does it fearlessly. If someone is not with him, he can easily stumble as the right leg isn’t stable yet. Rinpoche just heads off whether I am around or not! The long life puja went very well, Rinpoche was very happy.

Today, Dakpa Rinpoche (ex-Abbot of Sera Mey Monastery) will begin the pujas for Rinpoche; these will go on for several days.

Another important reason Rinpoche said for being in Nepal was that he could circumambulate the Swayambhunath Stupa which kept coming out very good in his mo. We did that yesterday, circumambulating part of the time in a wheelchair and part of the time walking with help. The big korwa at the base where there many stupas must be a few kilometers. We’ll also circumambulate Bouddha Stupa … it’s physiotherapy with holy objects!

The mental pollution of misconceptions is far more dangerous than drugs. Wrong ideas and faulty practice get deeply rooted in your mind, build up during your life, and accompany your mind into the next one. That is much more dangerous than some physical substance.

Lama Thubten Yeshe

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