DIRTY BAby

When I reached my home, checkchy was sleeping. I saw her closed eyes and steady breath and asked my mom “its 9 in the morning she’s still sleeping, should I wake her up?. My mom said “never do that mistake, if she wakes up then boy you have to bare the consequence”.

Around 9.30 somebody was screaming in front of me. I open my eyes and saw my niece screaming “checkchy, checkchy”. I smiled at her and said “wowo checkchy, you got new teeth”. She smiled and screamed “checkchy”. As my bro wanted to escape from his babysitting duty he lifted her up and made her sleep next to me. I covered her with a blanket and said “sleep baby sleep”. After few minutes she kept her legs on my stomach, then rolled a bit and kept hand on my face…it continued for a while. When I couldn’t sleep I got up from bed and looked at her. She was busy rolling.

She got up after sometimes. My bro fed her showing her Rum and butterfly. When she saw the bullterfly she extended her hand and made some sound and said “come here”. Then she started running here and there and my bro was running right behind her yelling “eat your cokum”. She used to run in and out sometimes she used to touch dogs tail, mouth and then show calf and say “ambaaaaa”. I asked her in English “show me your eyes checkchy”. She stared at me as if I am talking in some strange language. Then I asked her “show me your tongue checkchy”. Again she stared. Then I taught her few things like tongue, lips, teeth”. After her lessons were over I said “show me your teeth” and she showed her cheek. Fed up with this I said “AL isdumb”. That she repeated. Bingo!!!!! If anybody ask her “AL” and she completes the sentence saying “dumb”. My bro make her pee every 30 minutes. Sometimes she pees and sometimes she runs yelling “no susu “. But after 2 minutes she pees in her underpants.

From very first day I started babysitting which includes taking the baby for walk, teaching some bad stuff and beating. If I say “make susu” and if she doesn’t then I beat her and say “dirty baby”. She will run to her grandma and complaints “checkhy beating me”. Other day to punish me my bro chased me with his daughter and made her beat me. She pulled my hair and then beat me. As my both hands were tied up by my bro I just stared at AL. After beating me she ran and I chased her. Then I held her hands in mine and asked “you will beat me han?”. She looked at me with those pretty eyes and said “sorry”. I couldn’t resist myself and kissed her nose. If she wants anything I make her say “please”. She blinks her eyes like Loly 10 times and bends her head 30 degree and then 60 degree and says “please, please”. She looks so adorable I pinch her cheeks. She looks at her grandma and says “checkchy is pinching me”.

Other day my bro gave her a piece of chocolate . With a broad smile she took it and said “chokki, tanku”. The smile on her face was the proof of her joy. Night we were saying rosary when she started acting weird. She used to sit in one place and then make some weird face and run. Me and my dad were laughing seeing her drama. When I saw her doing that I remember I had seen that drama before. Ancy!!! She used to do that whenever she had worm’s problem. After the prayer she said “ants are biting my bum”. I asked where baby and she showed her bum. We all werer laughing seeing her worried face. Then I told my bro some weird medicine “keep a piece of garlic in her bum”. All stared at me and asked “from where you got this new medicine”. I scratched my head and said “guess google or may be…. I don’t know”. My dad stared at me and said “I am almost 70 and never in my life had I heard this medicine”. I knew it then may be my source of that medicine is wrong. I just smiled and said “okk,,,,may be you have to put the garlic inside her tummy through her mouth!!!”.

One evening nobody was there and I was babysitting AL. I asked her “wheres you bum baby?”. And she showed. Then she showed her dads under pants and said “its dada’s”. I thought my bro is worst than me in spoiling her. I peeled orange and gave her to taste. As nobody was around I squeezed the orange peel into her eyes. She blinked two times and smiled. I asked her “you want more baby?’. She said “yes checkchy more”. Again I squeezed the orange peel into her eyes. She smiled and even I smiled thinking how I love to babysit. Then again I squeezed orange peel into her eyes. This time it became more and she started screaming. I didn’t know what to do. I washed her face, showed her lizard nothing worked. Its then my bro came. He asked me “what did you do my baby”. I walked back and said “sorry I squeezed orange peel into her eyes”. My bro looked at me and said “are you crazy?she is small for those adult pranks. Anyway where did you keep those orange peels, I too have to try on her!!!”

She has seen my dad walking around with his air gun. She has a small toy of an army guy holding a gun. If you ask her “who is this”. She will say “its my grand pa”.

To impress remaining few bachelors in Kinnigoli I thought I can use my niece. So I dressed her up and took her. As I was running out of luck there were no signs of any guy. We entered a shop and there were 2 ladies. She asked them “how are you?”. “fine?”. Then she said “bless me”. When we finished this melodrama I cursed myself for bring her with me. We entered the next shop and she extended her hand and said “how are you?, fine?”. This scenario continued almost 5 to six times. When finally we exit from s shop she saw a small boy. She yelled saying “baba, baba”… She made me put her down and ran towards the boy. She extended her hand and said “baba, How are you? Fine?”. I am sure I wouldn’t have impressed a single soul but she defiantly impressed all small boys and their moms. Hopefully my bro and bhabi noticed her attention towards small boys. It is crystal clear in class 1 she will be having a boyfriend or many boyfriends.

She loves Konkani lullaby “adkuloe re budkulo”. Whenever she sleeps she says “sing me that budkulo song”. She is not scared of lizards, cockroaches. When dogs bark at the neighbors cats she yells at them and says “Chup, keep quiet”. She loves the song “I like to move it move it” from Madagascar. She adores her mom and dad. She likes to sip coffee with her grand pa. She imitates her grand ma and finally when she is bored she wants “checkchy”. I love babysitting, specially my niece. I make her susu and kakka. Washing her bum is taken care by her dad or her grandma. I make her pose for my pics. If any of you have small babies and need smart intelligent babysitter like me then don’t hesitate to approach me. I can promise you one thing ‘your baby will be the most smart, brave, spoilt and naughty baby’ in the world