Practical Tips for Productive Living

post written by: Marc Chernoff

How To Make The World A Better Place

Once upon a time, a young man and woman met, gazed into each other’s eyes, kissed, and knew – for certain – that they were supposed to be together forever. In the subsequent days, weeks, and months everything fell into place just as they had anticipated. He was perfect in her eyes, and she was perfect in his.

Oh, it’s the majestic certainty of young love! When two souls who barely know each other believe they know everything that they must know to live happily ever after in their own blissful bubble. They think this because it’s what their emotional hearts and minds tell them is true.

But you know what happens next. It’s what always happens next in phony fairy tales like this. For one reason or another, logic trumps emotion, their bubble bursts, and the two lovers tumble back down to Earth, bruising themselves along the way and realizing that their perfect partner isn’t so perfect after all.

Maybe he learns that she doesn’t like rock music – and rock music is extremely important to him. Maybe she learns that he never makes the bed – and making the bed is extremely important to her. Regardless of the specifics, our lovers are finally beginning to see each other for who they really are – imperfect human beings. This is the turning point at which ‘falling in love’ ends and the test of ‘true love’ begins.

Either their mindset adjusts and they accept reality – that true love isn’t so much about perfection as it is about growth and patience – or they move on to the next short-term fairy tale romance in hopes of finding that one perfect soul mate who does everything just right.

Why am I telling you this story?

Because the fluctuating feelings that steer our romantic relationships are quite similar to those that steer our motivation to make a meaningful impact on the world around us. A little passion is all that’s required to start, but only sustained perseverance makes it worthwhile.

Sure, short powerful bursts of effort and seemingly giant leaps in a single bound appear to be remarkable. But they fade as fast as they arrive, and all we’re left with in the end is an unfulfilled void.

An enduring dedication – fulfilling promises by marching forward with one foot in front of the other, even when the going gets tough – is what true love is all about. And it’s this kind of love, and only this kind of love, that can make the world a better place.

Very interesting angle and very true. That romantic bubble can be found in so many segments of life. I had never thought about it the way you put it in this article.

I can relate this idea to my own business. For the first 6-8 months I was almost running on pure adrenaline. So excited to be doing something new and unknown to me. Over time, you get knocked down and learn about some of the ugly sides of business. In order to sustain any level of success, it all comes down to the dedication that you talked about. Dedication to the cause is the only reason I am still in business today.

Nice story Marc. Changing the world takes patience and understanding like in a relationship. We can’t just dive in with a burst of motivation because it will eventually fade away. Just like how creating lasting love in a relationship takes effort and dedication, staying dedicated towards change one step at a time will make the world become a better place to live in.

This post reminds me of the book, The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. At the beginning he makes the exact same point that when we fall in love with someone we aren’t in our “sober” state of mind.

Instead we’re in more of a drunken state of mind where we’re under the influence of our emotions rather than our logic. Then once we sober up, come to our senses and start to see things that are “turn-off” we start to come back down to earth.

This reminds me to always put logic first in love situations. But better yet, to love unconditionally. Not everyone is perfect but it’s better for me to love unconditionally rather than based on how someone makes me feel.

I have been reading your blogs for quite awhile. And while I have enjoyed all of them, this one, by far has struck me the most. It is eloquently written and extremely poingnant. I love it! Thank you for sharing!

I am so excited and inspired by finding this site! There is so much here to make me think. The whole concept that perfection is unrealistic is so reassuring, especially in a relationship as you say, and in life in general.
Great post, really looking forward to more!

I completely agree. My fiancé and I have been together for over 3 years now, and it’s not because we are “perfect” together, or “perfect” for each other. There is no such thing. It is because have committed to each other and so we aren’t going to let things go easily. We work constantly and actively on our relationship because we want to be and stay together. And it is working perfectly.

I always stick by the idea that changing the world starts with changing yourself. We can’t change others unless they want to but we can change ourselves right now. Be a shining example of what is possible and people will flock TO you.