Thursday, October 13, 2005

Sunshine Monologue 50

Winter Blankets

Blog Musical Mood: “Break of Dawn” Michael Jackson

ATTENTION!! ATTENTION! Women size 14-20, get to plucking, waxing, shaving, manicuring, pedicuring, Lane Bryant and Avenue shopping – Why?! (starting the Carlton Banks Dance) Cause ‘WE GON GET A MAN! WE GON GET A MAN!’ How do I know this? (well I don’t but go with me on this, lol) Fall is here and the weather is changing – what goes perfect with a cold beer and a good football game…….A CHUBBY SISTA!!!! You got it – all the skinny broads are on their way being put up on the shelf, lol Winter time is here and Brothas will be looking for some ‘blankets’ to curl up with at night. And Heating bills are going to be going up too – HELL YEA!! I might even get me TWO MEN, lol lol One for the week and one for the weekend.

If you have been looking around – you see Bros looking at cha. I know you see it, because I see it. Brothers have started talking about Thanksgiving and how good their momma throws down – now is the time for you to get out your cookbooks and start dropping hints sistas. Start talking about how you can’t wait to make those apple pies from scratch etc. Now be aware - Big Girl Season only lasts till Spring Break. Realize that Skinny nem have been lying in wait all winter at the gym and will be pulling out the thongs in full force for this time of year to recapture the male attention. You have a small window of opportunity to be the it girl – so don’t blow this. Almost 40% of us will actually keep the man too. Sometimes we just need a chance, and here it is.

So don’t say I didn’t warn you – I’m getting ready!!!!!!!!!!!

Chipping Away at Innocence

Mini-me got her purse stolen at school yesterday. She called me and I saw a toddler in my mind as she told me. She was so upset. No she didn’t have any money, but she had what most of us have in this situation – emotional attachments. My pictures, my 12,000 vials of lip gloss (she is 11, lol). I hate when I see my child’s innocence being chipped away at by the ills of society.

Of course I went up there after school and sometimes just knowing a child ‘belongs’ to someone helps. As I walked down that hallway with my ‘loud pumps’ on so that you could hear the ‘determined parent’ gait echoing in the hall – I knew there was probably nothing that could be done, but I wanted to show my face regardless.

Well lo and behold after talking to the principal and having them give this a bit more attention – the pocketbook was found under the gym bleachers. I am glad, now I could speak to her about how to protect herself and her property in a den full of thieves.