her vote

“im sorry, the door on that side doesn’t have a keyhole”
“..so if it did, you would open the car door for me? like a gentleman?”
“of course.”

& i got excited.
rejuvenated a bit.i get to decide now
whether i find a guy who likes to open car doors for girls.. or not.
one of many conditions & things important to me
but still
i get a say.

instead of,
these are the things he comes with.. & wont do..
but i’m already neck deep in the thick of it all..
& i love him so much it hurts
that i cross off those conditions & things important to me
to make it work.

no no
this is a clean start.
without history
& longevity
& all our hopes & dreams tied to the tail end of our ship
sinking it slowly but surely.