Failing with 2 year old

She is delightful, clever, funny, behaves beautifully at nursery etc., but she has no respect for me. She ran off from me earlier in changing room at the baths, wouldn't even turn round never mind stop and nearly ended up in pool. She did not get to choose any sweeties as a sanction, she understood.

Just now she climbed up to touch things she knows she is not to, ignored being told no so was put straight in time out. As soon as she got out she went to do it again I ended up shouting at her.

Nothing seems to work. I am afraid something bad will happen to her and it will be my fault.

It sounds like perfectly normal 2 year old behaviour to me, and nothing to worry about. In fact I'd be concerned if she didn't behave like that! She's learning how to be a little human - what's acceptable, what's not, what reactions different behavours get. She sounds great - and you sound like a great mum. Try not to let it get you. Just keep on keeping on. She'll grow out of it soon enough. And you're right to have small 'sanctions' as you call it - like time out - otherwise she'd grow up thinking that there are no consequences! You need to TEACH your children. Pick your battles, so you don't end up feeling saying no or don't all the time - but do stay strong when she's doing something that could damage herself or in fact something you just don't like. Do try and find time to one-on-one stuff - but all children with siblings have to get used to the arrival of new littlies - and that's also an important life lesson - that life's not just about you.

What sort if things do you do with her? My d went through a phase for 6 months when he was tarring, pushing boundaries etc. i found the only thing that helped was to keep him really busy during the day (sometimes 2 toddler groups or a long walk in the woods) and this did seem to release some off his energy. When he did strop i said i could see he was upset/sad/angry and if he wanted to talk about it wee could when he calmed down until then just told him i wasnt talking to him and would ignite him and do something else i knew he liked and would distract him.

I don't think there's a magic cure unfortunately, mor a case of riding it out and being consistent

She is better when she's busy/exercised, we go dancing, swimming, soft play, park, walk to shops etc. and draw, bake, read stories, make dens, sing, snuggle up with cbeebies, normal toddler stuff! We've not been out much since Xmas as we've been taking it in turns to be ill so that won't be helping. Kept her busy today, no "episode" and only 45m til bedtime so fingers crossed!

We are going to try and fill the days more, like nursery, less chill-out aka wind-up time!