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Mike Pence: Finally GOP Found the New Dan Quayle

The Republican party lay in disarray for quite a long time after Bill Clinton beat incumbent George H. W. Bush. Not only had they lost the White House for what seem like an eternity to some but it would mark the end of the politician. Sure, James Danforth Quayle would remain involved in politics but Clinton’s election marked the end of the political greatness that was Dan Quayle. Enter Mike Pence.

For years, GOP have searched high and low, far and wide and in landfills, where many of the Hoosier state’s greatest political leaders have been found, in search of the next Dan Quayle. No matter the number of outhouses that were ransacked, there wasn’t one anywhere to be found. There, apparently, was only one Dan Quayle. Little did they know, there was a whole state full of stupid, inept politicians waiting for their chance to kick America in the nuts and lead it to ruin. Enter Mike Pence.

They were big shoes to fill, no doubt about that. Quayle’s greatest accomplishment was no doubt when he underlined the growing illiteracy problem in America when he misspelled “potato.” Quayle held one of the two Indiana Senate seats for most of the 80s and was the pride of Hoosiers with fewer brain cells than toes. Enter Mike Pence.

Being pitted against the wily Senate veteran Lloyd Bentsen in the 1992 vice presidential debate was a setback for Quayle. Getting taken to school by your grandfather will deflate even the strongest of men. Enter Mike Pence.