Housewives mopping, dusting and blogging sums us up. Our launch pad was VH1's Mob Wives. We've added ID's I Married A Mobster, other shows & mafia/gangster movie commentary to our blogging mix. Basically we are 'Miserable Often Bitchy Wives' (+one male), a blogging cocktail of the shows & movies we love to watch. It's our opinion and we're sticking to it.
Follow us on Twitter @ ChiaraSoprano1 or @undabawse.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Real Housewives Of New York: What The Hell Moments S5E11

How nice everyone is getting along, too bad groping George was invited!

I actually remembered the show was on tonight without anyone having to remind me. Why? Because all week Aviva has been harassing our “sister” blog, Stoopidhousewives.com on Twitter. Frankly, I have had my own Twitter issues with some mob wives, so I totally sympathize with SH. Now I will get into my What The Hell Moments…

A "clitoral lizard"???

Carole has a holiday party and invites everyone. I think Andy put her up to this idea. Carole is too intellectually elevated for this crowd and I think she finds them amusing most of the time. She is like a spectator more than a participant. I think she is going along with all the BS so she can end up writing a witty book about her experience. Andy also passed along another idea to Carole that I saw on and episode of the “Office” sitcom. Everyone brings a gift and when they open the gift they receive they have the option of keeping it or trading it for one of the other gifts. They were boring gifts any way. The What the Hell Moment comes when Carole opens the gift George (Aviva’s sex crazed father) brought and a lizard jumps out of the box. It caused a little commotion and he referred to it as a “clitoral lizard.” What’s next? A vaginal frog? Please, this man needs intensive therapy. He shouldn’t be allowed out in public and never around women. (Aviva had the audacity to say SH’s blog was going overboard! What about her own father? Can she do anything with him? Disgusting is all I have to say.)

Moving on. Sonja’s Toaster Oven photo shoot was a complete nerve wracking experience for me. I don’t know how Heather held it together and maintained her cool. Time is of the essence, but Sonja arrives an hour late for starters. Then she is busy gabbing instead of getting her hair and makeup done and getting dressed. But wait! Sonja has her period and is bleeding heavily. Why the hell does she goes into the bathroom with one of the men and tell him about her period? Don’t ask me why, I just watch, I don’t write this stuff. She complains to him that she always bleeds heavy and the doctor says she has a young uterus. Heather arranges two photo shoots for Sonja so the first one will be her team’s vision for promotion and the other will be Sonja’s. In the end, Sonja picks her vision. Who the hell cares if Heather is the expert? Heather just wasted a hell of a lot of time!

The ladies all get together at Carole’s house, this time without the men. They want to plan a trip together. Of course that would be my idea of a good time, hanging out with five people who insult my every thought and action! But they think it’s a great idea. Except for Aviva, who needs to bring Reid. Aviva can’t do a damn thing by herself except harass Stoopidhousewives.com. Here is my what the hell moment…Ramona actually made sense! Ramona tells her you didn’t always have Reid right? I mean you went to college and law school without Reid. Maybe you can do this without Reid? You can see that Aviva wasn’t buying it, but politely said she would think about it. I get the idea Aviva is used to getting her way all the time.

Ramona's Airbrushed J'Adore cover

Then there is a housewarming party by one of Sonja‘s rich friends and she invites everyone. On display are two magazine covers that Ramona is on, promoting her new red wine. However, Ramona is more interested in harassing Heather about Sonja’s Toaster Shoot, which she was forbidden to go to and who the hell cares? She kept going up to Heather and screaming some words in her face and walking away before Heather could answer. That behavior seemed fine with everyone. Also, Ramona was seen obviously eavesdropping. right behind Heather and Carole, and then took another shot at Heather.

Ramona gets closer to hear better, then explodes!

But, when Heather said Ramona was acting crazy, Mario and Aviva has an issue with that. They thought it was insulting. I thought she hit the nail on the head. What the hell was she acting like, if not crazy? Oh and then poor sensitive Aviva, nearly in tears, took issue with the fact the group was saying that Jacques wasn’t really French and his accent was fake. She thought that was mean and told them all so. Can this show get any more ridiculous? Stay tuned because I think it can, and it will.

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