The tree is his penis // it's very exciting // when held up to his mouth // the lights are all lighting // his eyes start a-bulging // in unbridled glee // the tree is his penis // its beauty, effulgent -amandabear

Every last one of you are banned for not talking about how forking funny the Halloween episode was. Nick in the haunted house had tears streaming down my face. I could not breathe and kept having to rewind it! So great!

I love New Girl but I am so tired when I get home on Tuesdays that I forget to watch. I did see the boob fight episode, so funny! When Jess was on the rotating platform trying to model I was laughing so hard!! Zooey Deschanel has a real knack for physical comedy

_________________Anyone for some German Shepherd Pie? - daisychainWell! Fruit is stupid! These onions taste nothing like fruit! - allularpunkDwarf-tossing for God: A Story of Hope - Invictus

Every last one of you are banned for not talking about how forking funny the Halloween episode was. Nick in the haunted house had tears streaming down my face. I could not breathe and kept having to rewind it! So great!

Every last one of you are banned for not talking about how forking funny the Halloween episode was. Nick in the haunted house had tears streaming down my face. I could not breathe and kept having to rewind it! So great!

Schmidt as Magic Mike for the win.

I know. That was just forking amazing! I fall more in love with this show after every episode.

Every last one of you are banned for not talking about how forking funny the Halloween episode was. Nick in the haunted house had tears streaming down my face. I could not breathe and kept having to rewind it! So great!

when the clown was screaming and he just kept screaming back, forever? we were dying.

_________________i'm not around much, but that doesn't mean i don't love you.

Every last one of you are banned for not talking about how forking funny the Halloween episode was. Nick in the haunted house had tears streaming down my face. I could not breathe and kept having to rewind it! So great!

when the clown was screaming and he just kept screaming back, forever? we were dying.

I finally saw the episode, and this moment was the BEST.

_________________Ridiculous people on the internet are consistently ridiculous. -pandacookie