Mark J. Drozdowski

Now well past his thirties, Mark J. Drozdowski was born -- that’s why he’s here. His fascination with higher education began just after high school, when his parents kicked him out and told him to go to college. Admittedly not very bright, he managed to bribe enough people to graduate from Penn and earn a doctorate at Harvard. He’s since toiled in “institutional advancement” just so his relatives won’t know what he does. Now, as director of university communications at the University of New Haven, he spends most of his time explaining why the school isn’t, in fact, in New Haven (he’s also discovered, quite by accident, that the University of Delaware is actually located in Idaho). In his spare time, Mark enjoys life with his wife, three kids, cat and fecally fecund Beagle, cashew halves, 1 percent milk and playing Slim Whitman’s Greatest Hits on an endless loop. The opinions expressed in this column are entirely someone else’s.