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'50 Things You Should Not Say To Autism Parents' PIOG

Autism is over diagnosed. I've seen Rainman and Temple Grandin, I totally get it. He must be really sad to run away so much. Stop being so sensitive, they were only joking when they called her a (insert nasty hurtful name here). He just needs to apply himself more. My kid does that too. Why do you let him carry that ______ around everywhere? I can't believe you let your child run around naked. You need to make her eat more variety. It's not that hard. At least she can _____. (Talk, walk, smile, etc.) It must be so nice to get special treatment everywhere. Are you sure he has autism? He seems fine to me. God knew you could handle this. How dare your child not look at me when I'm talking to them! He can talk, he just doesn't want to. If you knew she might meltdown why did you come here? Teaching him is like training a dog. How hard could it be? She can't have autism; she looked me in the eye. I have a miracle cure for autism to tell you about. Disneyland would be much easier for you if you left him home with your mother. It's good your baby is a girl so she won't have autism like her brothers. There is nothing wrong with her. She is just quirky. You just need to force her to sit through it, she'll learn. I gave up on him and stopped trying. Have you tried what Jenny McCarthy did? I can't believe she isn't potty trained already. Why aren't they doing ______ yet? Have you been working with them? Isn't she too old for a binkie? He is so spoiled. He can't have autism, he is so smart. If you had enough faith in god, his autism would go away. She's a girl, she can't have autism.
Did you know ______ causes autism? (Pollution, food, shots, microwaves,
inbreeding, mean moms, drug addicted moms, power plants, loud talking,
too much TV, etc.) Kids usually grow out of autism. They don't need therapy because you’re such a good therapist. Good thing you’re done having kids. You wouldn't want another one with autism. How dare you drug your child! But you’re so normal, how do you have a child with autism? Does the mean she is really good at ______? (Math, art, music, etc.) He just needs to be medicated. He doesn't have autism, he has discipline problems. Could you please take your son out? He's disturbing everyone. The way your house is in lock down is absurd. You should mortgage your home to try ________ therapy. They are in a normal classroom? Is that ok? You made up the autism diagnosis for attention. Make her come give me a hug. I can't believe you won't come to this crazy, busy, loud, sensory overload event. They would like it I promise. Everyone has some form of autism. Can't you just control him?

Some of those questions made me laugh. I have had some rude things said to me at one time or another. Right in front of my ds, too. I even had a co-worker say nobody says those kinds of things to moms in public cuz she never heard anything like that being a teacher's aid in a special ed school. Hello?? Asked her if she ever took the kids out to stores alone. No. Well then, you have no idea. Secondly, unless the mom is a heel, she won't say those kinds of things when she is dropping off or picking up kid from school. Doesn't have a clue. How can you unless you walk a mile in our shoes? Come home with me and deal with what us moms with kids on the spectrum deal with and then come back and apologize. Am I wrong? I just smile at the offending person and turn my back on them. My ds once looked a man right in the eye and said loudly, don't say that about me, it makes me feel bad. Thank you for posting that list. It made me chuckle and I needed that today.

we've heard quite a few of these too- probably a good 10 of them... ds is still in testing but there is SOMETHING and some of those questions make me want to punch someone.. my dad use to tell us to FORCE our son to talk, that if he didn't eat, drink, etc that he would finally just ask-- he talks a storm after a month of individual ASL classes but even thoughs he didn't learn anything in class, he would learn something in class- not paying attention mind you, i would be learning and then a month later he would randomly sign things from a tv show at home OR signs I had learned WEEKS ago, never something from the class of the day. My dad also told us to move his room around nightly and he would get over his adversion (nice way to put it) to change. My brother tells us we're looking for something wrong with him (my brothers only seen our son a handful of times), MIL also said that we're looking for problems with him (she only met him once when he was 1 and has only skyped with him a few times), dh's family has all stood around our soon LAUGHING at him for having a meltdown thinking he would stop freaking out if he say how "funny" it was. A-holes, lets just say I ripped them a new one. People have walked by us commenting on not bringing our kid to the store if hes going to act that way (hes usually great in the store BUT not always)- and to "control" our kid, dh almost followed two girls out to reem them out once when they spoke loud enough for him to hear- this was BEFORE we REALLY thought he had autism... the list goes on, DRIVES ME NUTS. :( OH my favorite is : HE IS ONLY 2! and my friend "my son does that too" so I finally told her to get her son tested LOL

YES!! These drive me crazy!! Espeically when it comes to my youngest - I'm trying to figure him out and what his needs are. But I feel like I can't really talk about it with anyone in real life because they all say this crap. I think they must just be trying to make me feel better. But to completley dismiss my worries doesn't make me "feel better." It makes me feel like I must be over reacting or crazy.

This is kind of different, but kind of the same...when I was 12 my mom's sister was diagnosed with schizophrenia. Right before her diagnois, you can imagine all the problems her and her husband and kids were having. She was acting so strage. Well her dad, my grandfather was all like: why are you acting this way? You have a nice husband, a nice house, a pool...... (as if having nice things somehow prevented you from having a mental illness)

So how did your friend take it when you told her to get her son tested?

Quoting takeitall13:

we've heard quite a few of these too- probably a good 10 of them... ds is still in testing but there is SOMETHING and some of those questions make me want to punch someone.. my dad use to tell us to FORCE our son to talk, that if he didn't eat, drink, etc that he would finally just ask-- he talks a storm after a month of individual ASL classes but even thoughs he didn't learn anything in class, he would learn something in class- not paying attention mind you, i would be learning and then a month later he would randomly sign things from a tv show at home OR signs I had learned WEEKS ago, never something from the class of the day. My dad also told us to move his room around nightly and he would get over his adversion (nice way to put it) to change. My brother tells us we're looking for something wrong with him (my brothers only seen our son a handful of times), MIL also said that we're looking for problems with him (she only met him once when he was 1 and has only skyped with him a few times), dh's family has all stood around our soon LAUGHING at him for having a meltdown thinking he would stop freaking out if he say how "funny" it was. A-holes, lets just say I ripped them a new one. People have walked by us commenting on not bringing our kid to the store if hes going to act that way (hes usually great in the store BUT not always)- and to "control" our kid, dh almost followed two girls out to reem them out once when they spoke loud enough for him to hear- this was BEFORE we REALLY thought he had autism... the list goes on, DRIVES ME NUTS. :( OH my favorite is : HE IS ONLY 2! and my friend "my son does that too" so I finally told her to get her son tested LOL

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