July 7, 2008

something to ponder...why do you want to have children?

This question had been in my mind for quite some time and I really don't know why this came up, so I decided to post this question for my fellow n@wies (newlywedsatwork). I was overwhelmed by the many responses I got and the different insights into this question. Yes, there are women who naturally would want to have children and there are those who would plot out a game plan with regards to their family life, and that includes whether to have children or not, and when to have them. There was a question of being ready physically, emotionally, spiritually or financially, and there are those whose time has not come yet for them to bear their offsprings.I wanted to have children even before I got married, but I was also afraid that I would not be the kind of parent that my family expects me to be and I also had fears of what kind of life can I give to my children. Jeff and I had plans to have children a year after our marriage, but our plans and my fears were conquered by a great need to nurture and love. When Joaqui was born, I was overwhelmed by the love that I have for my child that sometimes I could not believe the joy this kind of love brings.Having children is a gift from God that we can accept or not - a choice that we have to make. If we accept this gift, it is our responsibility to nurture this gift not only to bring forth happiness for ourselves but also to God who gave it. It is a gift that is given in His time, and while some of us wanted to accept this gift, it is only God who knows when to give it to us. As I became a parent, I have learned to give the best of myself to a life not my own. I have experienced happiness in both the complexity and simplicity of being a mother. I have learned to give and make someone else's happiness and welfare my priority before my own.It's never a simple question and for the hardships and sacrifices for having them, the heart has it's reasons that reasons know nothing of.

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