Hum de dum…

I am struggling a little. My friend’s dad is dying of cancer. He has 2-8 weeks. I saw him yesterday. He looked like a small little dying man. I’m gonna miss him. I’m mostly sad for her. She still needs him. I suppose we have to trust the universe on this one. She asked me yesterday if I had an idea where he’ll go after he dies. It breaks my heart to think that she won’t have her father beside her anymore. This is rough. I love her, and I hate to watch my loved ones suffer.
It made me grateful for my dad. It made me want to quit smoking for real. Life is so much bigger and stronger than I care to admit most days. I wish I could forget my fear and just go for it. Live like I was intended to live. Dance freely… I read something the other day that went something like: Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.
something like that.
Oh lordy. what a world, what a world.