Where's Your Faith?

Month: January 2015

I grew up with the knowledge that I was a little different than everyone else in my family. I was treated extra special. My grandparents lavished gifts and treats on me that my cousins didn’t get. I got to lick the cake batter off the cake spoon rather than having to scrape the bowl. I got a larger share of the sugary, icy snow cones we enjoyed occasionally. Whenever relatives visited, they stared at me sadly and said I looked just like my mother. I didn’t really pay attention. At that point in my life, my grandmother made up my world. I spent all my time with her. I don’t remember at what point I found out that my mother had died when I was a year and half old. I don’t remember finding out that my father had abandoned me with my grandmother. One of my aunts eventually adopted me but essentially, I was an orphan. That fact haunted me enough to lead me to a really dark place in my life. I was self-destructive, spoiled, rude, and suicidal. I starved for love of some sort. My adopted mother didn’t dole out love the way I wanted her to and my grandmother was far away. The need for love left me easily swayed by men. I thought I needed to drink and party to fit in. I did it all, but I hated every minute of it. There was no joy in my life. It sounds so cliché, but it’s so true. I was an orphan and I felt alone and abandoned most of the time.

What I’m grateful for now is the fact that there are no orphans of God. You see He doesn’t leave you or forsake you. If He cares for the sparrow, how much more is His love for me…for us? Humans are the pinnacle of God’s creation, He made us just a little lower than the angels. He LOVES us!!! His love is encompassing, unfailing, and infinite. Where I had no parent, when I desperately needed one, He showed up and most importantly, He STAYED!

I lost my wedding ring…on the beach…in a big pile of sand. Two summers ago, my friends and I were on the beach playing volleyball and my wedding band flew off my finger and fell into the sand. Two miracles happened that day. The first was that I felt the ring slip off my finger; I say that’s a miracle because I was so into the game and probably wouldn’t have noticed it was missing until later. I immediately screamed “STOP” and frantically explained what had happened to my friends. Luckily, all my friends with me were from HopeNYC, we were spending a Sunday afternoon together. The first thing we did was pray because HopeNYC is a praying church, we pray for EVERYTHING! Need a healing? We’ll pray for you! Need a financial breakthrough? We’ll pray for you! Need to find a lost Jimmy Choo? We’ll pray for you harder!!!

After we prayed, we started sifting through the sand. Everyone got down on their hands and knees and helped. Bystanders were offering suggestions once they learned what we were doing, “You should get a metal detector”, “Maybe it fell under the boardwalk.” As the minutes ticked by I started getting even more anxious and frantic. I wasn’t so concerned with the ring itself, but rather with how hurt my husband would be if I lost it. I dissolved into tears because I was just heartbroken. Finding a tiny ring in a pile of sand was impossible. And then I heard a voice saying “Is this it?” I looked up and someone was holding the ring up! Then I burst into harder tears because indeed it was a miracle! Only Jesus would help me find what was impossible to find!

All that to say this. Jesus is not impossible to find. He’s everywhere, all the time. He wants you to find him. The Bible says “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8). Ask Jesus to enter your life. Seek him and you will find him. Don’t miss your chance to discover who he is and the richness he brings to your life!