So I finally decided to break down and get a harness buddy for my insanely active toddler. We were at World Market getting some new chairs for the dining room (as an anniversary gift to ourselves) and there happened to be a Target next door. While Aaron was helping them load stuff into the car, I went next door with Ashton to see if they had what we were looking for. I had originally looked at a monkey, because that seemed insanely fitting for my son. All they had were bears, and I knew that if I went anywhere this weekend, I would want this thing. So I tried to convince him that a bear would be awesome.

I handed him the bear and, with my best excited voice, asked him,”Isn’t this a cute bear Ashton?”

“Yeah,” was his response. He took the bear from me and tried hugging it a few times. Feeling optimistic, I asked if we should take Mr. Bear home. “No.” And Mr. Bear found himself being thrown from the cart and onto the floor.

I picked up the bear and tried again, this time with all of the enthusiasm I could muster. I got the exact same (if a little more annoyed) reaction. This went on a few more times. I decided to wander around to see if I could get someone to help. Maybe they had monkeys somewhere and I was just blind. I didn’t find anyone to help, but I did find my husband coming to find us. “Did they not have it?” He asked.

“They didn’t have the monkey, but they have a bear.”

“Did you have your heart set on a monkey?”

So I took him to the bears and showed him the delightful reaction I got when trying to force the bear on our fickle child.

“Ashton, look at the really cute bear! Don’t you want to take the bear home?”

“No.”

“Well, what if we just put the bear in the basket. How about that?”

“NO!” And he reached into the basket and threw the bear as hard as he could. By now Aaron got the idea and agreed that we should at least ask if they had any monkeys. We headed up to customer service and were “helped” by a lady who not only had no idea what we were talking about, but I’m pretty sure had no idea what she was doing. She looked up something and started talking about colors and sizes and how she didn’t see any different patterns. I looked at her blankly and declared, “It’s a stuffed animal!” I might have yelled that last bit because she gave me a somewhat worried look. Aaron thanked her for her help (if that’s what you could call it) and led me out of the store.

We hit another Target on the way home. By then the other child (aka parasite) had been using my bladder as a punching bag and I couldn’t stand it anymore. I ran into the bathroom as Aaron took Ash to find a monkey. As I walked toward the kids section, I saw Aaron walking back with what looked like an empty cart. My heart sank. Did they not have monkeys either? Did he have the exact same reaction? Was this stupid idea not going to work?

The reason I couldn’t see the monkey was that it was in my son’s demanding hands. He was trying to tear it out of the box by the time I reached them, and we had to ask the cashier to cut it out for him.

He wears the silly thing around the house and tells you all about his back pack. Constantly. We have yet to use the “tail”, but he’s so happy wearing the silly thing that I think it will be ok. I guess we’ll find out.