In the spirit of looking for a way to discuss these things that recognizes the different perspectives...

I think it's clear that, whatever "aiki" may have meant to Takeda and Ueshiba, the term was not used cleanly. You've got here two quotes about "aiki" which certainly seem to go against the IP/IS definition of aiki.

What does it mean for your spirit to "fit in" with your opponent's, to Tomiki? Do you adapt to their intent to hit you? Clearly not. So "fitting in" is somehow reconcilable with taking control. I started out in Tomiki Aikido and I never thought there was any doubt who ended up fitting in with whom.

What about the "principle of gentleness"? If I can counter your power neither by avoiding it nor fighting directly with it, is that "gentle"?

What if I can bring my opponent's movements in accord with mine? Is that "gentle"?

What's the relationship between getting out of the way or fitting in with my opponent, and kuzushi? How do I create kuzushi if all I do is get out of the way?

If I use force against my opponent's technique to move them in the direction they're already going, is that "fitting in"? Or is force force whether applied against my opponent's movement or with it?