Butt Implant Could Deliver Push-Button Orgasms

Electrodes inserted in your spine. A box the size of your wallet embedded in your ass. Cum at the touch of a button. Totally worth it, right?

…clinical trials to begin later this year with Medtronic, a company based in Minneapolis. He says the stimulating wires could connect to a signal generator smaller than a packet of cigarettes implanted under the skin of one of the patient’s buttocks. “Then you’d have a hand-held remote control to trigger it,” he says. “But it’s as invasive as a pacemaker, so this is only for extreme cases.”

It’s only for women so far, because guys tend to have a natural “lever” they can “pull,” which is almost as easy as a button, and easier on your buttocks.

But would women subject themselves to such invasive surgery? “If young women of 15 or so are having painful operations to enlarge their breasts when they don’t have to, are you kidding? Of course it’ll be used,” says Pfaus.

Dude…tramp stamps. The lower back stings like shit, and you’re lucky if you can get away with being tattooed while on any sort of painkiller. Doctors have the good drugs.

Once it’s inside you, does that officially qualify you as a Sex Cyborg? Because that kinda has a ring to it.