Tuesday, January 14, 2014

You're My Homework.

It's true. At group (PHP) they know I don't want to do anything including the things I enjoy. You - I enjoy. So here I am.
News? Well lets see.....My daughter achieved her personal best. Cuts all the way from wrist to inner elbow.
I secretly slipped a gal -the crazy cat lady- $50 because Hunter had given me $$ for the month+ that he'll be gone and she really needed the money. The following day she brought it up and she was livid! The social worker asked if she knew who did it and she said she thought so. The social worker suggested she confront the person when she had a chance. Later that day when there was only one other person there she asked me and I said that yes it was me. She was mad and gave the money back and I apologized and then she hugs me. Me? Confused and hurt. Not that she returned the money but that she was so angry.
What else.....oh, then there were the texts between my daughter-in-law and me. Boiled down I had asked if she called Karen -my ex's wife- almost every day and she said yes. It confused and surprised me. Daughter-in-law said that yes, she did. That Karen liked updates on the kids and that it was nice to have someone to give them to. She is seemingly abrupt with me whenever I call. I thought she was just too busy. But then to find out she calls Karen all the time? What am I? Chopped liver?

Fine. So I take things wrong. Perhaps, but I certainly don't think so. And yeah, it's true that I cry alot for a variety of reasons in group. Tell me I'm wrong to feel bothered by these things.
In the mean time.....I am a believer in things happening in 3's. So.....what's next?

Recently I read a quote and it went something like this. You can't control what others do, you can only control yourself. Yeah, must admit that I'd be pained and pissed too!I'm distancing myself from the shit that makes my blood boil.It may not be the right thing to do, but it's working for me.Like...don't call me, I'll call you, but don't hold your breath. Hang in there my friend!(((hugs)))Pat

Hello, heading in to group is going to start stirring the emotions. So the tears are primed and ready. Isn't having a rant or a cry what group is all about? If it stirs you up and/or you feel a little better go with it. As Red Shoes says don't worry about what others do or say. When you become content with yourself a little more you'll see it probably didn't matter or wasn't really importantSpanner x