---- ALLAN'S PERSPECTIVE ---- The left wing drives me crazy, and the right wing scares the shit out of me!

Allan's Perspective is not recommended for the politically correct, or the overly religious! Some people have opinions, and some have convictions ..., what we offer is Perspective!

We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special." Stephen Hawking.

Sunday, May 31, 2015

Sunday Morning Funnies #3

The Haircut

A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to
Rome. He mentioned the trip to the barber who responded, "Rome? Why would
anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome.
So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking American Airlines," was the reply. "We got a great
rate!"

"American Airlines?" exclaimed the barber. "That's a terrible
airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're
always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at the downtown International Marriott."

"That dump! That's the worst hotel in the city. The rooms are small, the
service is surly and they're overpriced. So, whatcha doing when you get
there?"

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and we hope to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the barber. "You and a million other
people trying to see him. You'll be at the back of St Peter's Square and from
that distance he'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip
of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the man again came in for his regular haircut. The barber asked
him about his trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the man. "Not only were we on time
in one of American Airlines's brand new planes, but it was overbooked and they
bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a
beautiful 28 year old stewardess who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel
was great! They'd just finished a $25 million remodeling job and now it's the
finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and
gave us the presidential suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the barber, "I know you didn't get to see the
Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, for as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss
Guard tapped me on the shoulder and explained that the pope likes to personally
meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private
room and wait, the pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes
later the pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down as he
spoke a few words to me."