Obsessive jealousy is harmful, as is unreasonable jealousy over a feared or even imagined cause. It destroys relationships.

Jealousy affects friendships - how many 'friends' have tried to make you cheat since you got serious about losing weight? It affects work situations, college, uni, everything. Even slimming clubs and Boards, sadly.

i do get jealous and it a every hard thing to over come and i feel sorry for anyone who has this!

i getting better - but when i see a slim women (i don't know why because most people work hard to look like that)-- that look good i glab my bloke hand - sad i know but now it has become more of a habit rather then being jealous!!!!

so that to me will mean that its gone over the top!!!

so i have stop myself --- so the thing i am saying is sometimes it can go to far as in a habit rather then jealous anymore!

My advice : have it in your heart. that you want to do something about it – don’t give excuses or say you can’t do it (there no such word as can’t) could not – I don’t belive it for one second – everyone can do when they try!

It may be hard but don’t give up if you do what’s a point in moaning about it !

- Its your life so live it – smile someone else will smile – shout then someone will not listen - incudling me!

Jealously is not a normal emotion. Envy is, which can often get confusd with Jealously. Envy is not a threat though where jealously (be it real or imagined) is.

On this basis of course, there is no spill from normal levels to abnormal levels of jealously but they can be measured on intensity.

For example: say i am jealous of this girl that my boyfriend works with. Am i jealous of her because shes interested in him? because hes interested in her? or because i am not secure? Now, 'normal' levels of this is to leave it at that. However, this can get intesified to levels where i may harbour destructive thoughts/actions against this imagined 'threat' - thats where its dangerous and 'abnormal' but non of it really is.

envy however, would be i want a behind/legs/chest or her fancy car etc like hers...thats normal. Envy would spill to abnormal levels if i plotted to steal her car or destroy it. Thats where it changes.

I think jealousy is very normal, but it crosses into a problem when it becomes obsessive or negatively affects other aspects of your life. If you're losing sleep, or spending money you don't have, or avoiding friends and phone calls, it can be a problem. But I don't see anything wrong with mentally calling a super-skinny girl a *****, or wishing your neighbor's new sports car would get keyed. As long as you don't punch the girl or slash the tires, you're doing ok. lol

i used to be a very jealous person when I was young but I seemed to have grown out of it.
it's normal when it's contained and not hurting yourself too much (a bit of jealousy isnt a bad thing) but when it gets into the realms of it taking over your every thought and action thats when it's a problem.

a bit of envy or jealousy can help with self improvement, whether it be going up the work ladder or wanting to fit into the same things as your friends.

Flower, who is a newbie on this site, had great arms, i'm jealous of her arms, so took up heavier weights to improve mine - I want arms like hers but I dont hate her for them, i'm just jealous i didnt get ones like hers.

I think most people do suffer with jealousy (actually more envy than jealousy) at one time or another but it's when that jealousy becomes destructive to yourself or others that it becomes harmful. My Dad has been very negative towards me since I'm losing weight and I feel this is because I'm now smaller than him. It isn't destructive to me because I won't let it be but it could easily be harmful if I wasn't such a strong person

MiniMins.com is a weight loss support community helping each other on their weight loss journey. We have a multitude of forums, from Slimming World and Exante, to Success Stories. Click the logo at the top right to return to the forum home page at any time.