Selling Exclusivity

Being exclusive was easy. We just didn’t let anyone in. But selling exclusivity was hard, because once we succeeded we were no longer exclusive. We’d be out on rides and see a thousand other cyclists that looked just like us, except they weren’t as handsome or as fast and they were on their way to real jobs. But they still looked like they could be cool. And people who don’t know any better could easily confuse them for us. With their white shoes and carbon wheels and semi-ironic mustaches.

We’ve been too successful selling cool to not cool people. Now people who are not cool look cool, and it’s confusing. To us. The cool people.

So we’re going to dial it back a bit. We’re going to go back to our roots. We’re going to go back to invitation only gallery shows. Unfortunately, we haven’t been doing much lately, so we just hung up some of our old black and white photos. Then we stood around and looked at them. Then we took pictures of ourselves looking at them. Then we made those pictures black and white.

Big Fonts

We like our rides like we like our fonts. Sans serif. If we have something to say, we will say it in Helvetica overlaid on a picture of us looking off into the distance, pretending that our photographer didn't just say, "Look off into the distance like you're thinking deeply about something!"

Blogvertisasionalizing

We look special, but we're just like you. A couple of cyclists who ride around with a professional stenographer in tow. And just like you, we want something for nothing. So if you're a "sponsor," we'll pretend we just discovered your product and love it. Hard and in public.

Latest Tweets

@RealPressSecBot That' not how tariffs work. American consumers pay them, NOT CHINA.