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Richard Hammond has his Top Gear co-hosts’ backs. Hammond came to the rescue of Jeremy Clarkson – who is about the last person you’d think would need rescuing – when they came up against some pushy security at a U.S. club. “Jeremy almost had a dust-up with a bouncer,” Richard reveals. “I don’t know why, but he pulled a collapsing telescopic cosh on me. I got angry and squared up, but he put it away. I’ve got mad moves that would tie a ninja in knots.” The Sun is waiting for Clarkson’s account of the little melee…perhaps the bouncer was intimidated by Richard’s feathered hair and highlights?

Maybe now that he’s no longer shooting Skins, Nicholas Hoult has time to be corrupted by the likes of the Geldof girls. Somebody save him.(The Sun)

Sir Tom Jones will move to an Amy Winehouse-influenced “retro” sound for his comeback album, which will be produced by Future Cat (Lily Allen, Kate Nash).(BBC)

On Friday Night with Jonathan Ross, Cheryl Cole will talk about problems in her marriage to Ashley Cole.(Digital Spy)

The Guardian‘s Diane Shipley says “no thanks” to the UK Law & Order remake: “Although Dick Wolf, creator of the original series, has pledged that his company will co-produce the British version, I can’t see it giving the American show any competition in the ratings stakes, even on this side of the pond. In fact, it only shows how far ITV is behind the BBC. Instead of original content like Life on Mars, ITV is trying to re-work an American stalwart without the acting talent or production values to back it up.”

Tilda Swinton has given away her Best Supporting Actress Oscar because her folks back in Scotland were “bored” with it: “They were kind of intrigued with it, like they’d be intrigued if you had come in with a cucumber and put it on the table, and say, ‘This is interesting.'”(Daily Record)

Dame Helen Mirren will star in a National Theatre production of Phaedre, which will be directed by History Boys director Nicholas Hytner.(The Stage)

The UK Music Hall of Fame will shut down due to “funding problems.”(NME)

Noel Gallagher not only wants to become the next Larry David, he also wants to pen the next Bond theme.(NME)

Van Morrison has banned alcohol at his shows. Fans are pissed – and not in the good way. One rages: “I enjoy listening to music while having a few pints and I can’t see a problem with that. I know he’s got a grumpy reputation but I didn’t realize he wants to take the fun out of going to his own gigs.” (Telegraph)

Video: Pink Floyd‘s David Gilmour talks to The Daily Telegraph‘s Neil McCormick about the late Richard Wright.

Andrew Lloyd Webber will judge the UK’s next entry into the Eurovision Song competition.(Telegraph)

Estelle continues to rack up award nominations, garnering five nods for the UK Urban Music Awards.(BBC)