Masterchef. It's back. And it's even more ridiculous than last time. If you were even for one minute thinking of not watching it, let me tempt you with this morsel: last night, Gregg Wallace's food recognition round was based entirely around eggs. That's right. A man more commonly known as Gregg the Egg, with a head that looks like it would flip open to reveal a lovely soft-boiled yolk, was made to brandish an ostrich egg with a straight face (his face, not the egg's). Truly, it doesn't get funnier than this.

Not that anyone in last night's quarter final was laughing. No – they were much too busy telling Gregg and John Torode how much they wanted to open their own bistros. (I can only guess from the fact they were all wandering round Borough Market searching for truffles and fillet steak that this was recorded pre-credit crunch. Now it would be a caff serving toasted cheese sandwiches).

Anyway, predictably enough Gregg and John were back to their old shouty ways. Although old Eggy to a rather greater extent – he is beginning to sound suspiciously like a drunken impression of himself. Which, while something for us all to aim for, does have the effect of making him seem slightly mad. (Not helped, in Wednesday's instalment, by him having weird clumps of concealer stuck on his face). John seems to have toned it down a notch. Thank god.

And the contestants last night were really pretty good for a quarter final. There was lovely smiley Mitra who got knocked out before even cooking after she mixed up a duck egg with a goose egg; Elisa, with her Middle Eastern meets Mediterrean dish; Glen the cocky carpenter who looked a bit like a less posh Boris Johnson; and Dennice, who has four children and therefore was patronised by John at every opportunity. Seriously, Torode! Asking a woman how she can possibly be a chef if she has kids is not really very cool, particularly on the second occasion. Who are you? Alan Sugar?

On the menus: scollops (twice) – which I'm beginning to think should carry a minus score for unoriginality – big prawns with salsa, lamb with coriander sauce, monkfish wrapped in parma ham, pork with mash and lentils. For pudding: a plum frangipane tart, chocolate mousse, lime and coconut cheesecake. Decent stuff, but not exactly experimental.

But does it always need to be? For my money, the right person won even if the menu was a wee bit uninspiring. What do you think?