I'm a One Shot Wonder at
Orgies! What Can I Do To Keep From Missing Out??!?

Dear Couch,

I'm a sexually
adventurous male and have been
to a couple of orgies. The problem is
after I come once, I'm set and ready to go
home. Many of my other male
friends can go the whole night and cum 4, 5 times.
I'm not even
interested in the 2nd time. I feel I'm missing out on a lot of
great
sex. What do you advise to overcome this problem? I'm now 35 but
actually
I felt the same way even in my
teens.

Cripes Man!
You're cruising the swinger's scene and leaving
after a quick nut!?!
We're surprised none of your fellow 'party' guests haven't
mentioned
this unacceptable behavior to you themselves. They could give you
far
better input into this issue than we could so if our answer doesn't
help you,
don't be shy. Next time you're at a planned orgy, find some
guy you can talk to
and explain your situation to him. You can bet he's
felt the same way you do at
some point and can teach you how to get more
out of the situation. Here's a site
which describes Etiquette in Swinging
and you
should also examine the chapter, Group Sex, in the
book
The Ethical Slut for more tips.

The way you describe
it, you're exactly the last thing people
want to see at their little
get-togethers. Orgies, or swinger parties, are
supposed to be a feast of
sensual flesh. You seem to be using your 'in' as a
means to a quick
nut, then you're done, bored, and gone. This is not the purpose
of an
orgy but rather the purpose of pornos. The most important wisdom one
can
take from an orgy experience are: 1) The orgasm is NOT the purpose of
sensuality
in this type of scene! The purpose is to prolong and examine
the experience of
being sexual. 2) It is an excellent situation to
practice the long lost art of
focusing on your partner's needs. and 3)
If you go as a couple, it is a great
way to develop confidence in your
relationship, meaning&nbsp if you can freely
express your sexuality with
others and then still maintain a jealous free
comfortable relationship,
then things are very good.

Let's take a moment here to not
mislead our readers. Orgy or
Swinger parties do not generally invite
single males probably for the same
reason as your behavior. Generally
only couples or single women are asked to
attend. We suggest you approach
your next adventure with a different attitude.
First get rid of the need
to get-a-nut by having a lengthy porno jerk off right
before going to the
party. Then go to the sexual/social event with socializing
in mind. Look
at any fleshy contact situation the same as you would a
cocktail
conversation. This is an opportunity for you to practice being a
great lover and
if you approach it as that you will become one. If you
continue to approach it
as a quick fuck, not only will you be wasting
this opportunity but you'll
probably not be invited back.

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