Call Center Comedy Batch 2

I spent several years in the BPO industry as a Quality
Assurance Officer, listening to calls and grading a representative’s performance.
Through constant monitoring and coaching, we ensure that standards and
guidelines set by clients are met. The job requires a great deal of patience,
and more often than not we go home exhausted. However, this position has its own
perks: we get to hear funny slip-ups first hand. If you haven’t read part 1, click here.

P.S. I understand that nobody is perfect, and I am not
mocking people for their mistakes as I too have my own. This is purely intended
FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY. If you want to have a good laugh, scroll down and read
through.

Call 1: Active Listening Fail

Customer:Should I erase
the http? Or just the www?Agent:Gotcha!

Call 2: Animal Sounds 101

Agent: Do you have a cat?

Customer:Yes! I have
three.Agent: Wow! Does your cat meow?
Customer:…

Call 3: Paraphrasing Fail

Agent: Thankyou for calling, how can I help you?

Customer:I’m supposed to
get my service on the 19th but now I’m being told by someone from
the order status group that it’s going to be connected on a much later date! I
need internet because school starts on the 16th!Agent: I’m sorry to hear that. That was the representative told her
about regarding the previous... I mean the previous customer agent... I mean
the previous representative told or... Told... Yeah... That you will be having
the service on 19th right?

Customer: What?

Call 4: Confidence Fail

Agent:What is the model of your modem? Is it
XP, Vista, 7, or MAC?

Customer: You mean my computer?

Agent:No. I need to know the operating system
of your modem.

Customer: I think you’re not asking the right question.

Agent:Sir, I’m one of the best technical
support agents here. I know what I’m doing.

Customer: Really?

Agent:Yes! If you can just give me the
operating system of your M-O… I’m sorry, it’s been a long day. I meant your
computer’s operating system.

Customer:Told you that’s what you wanted.

Call 5: Distant Future

Customer: Can you send me easy
steps I can take before I call you guys?

Agent: Sure! I will send you troubleshooting tips so that this will serve as a
future reference in the future.

Call 6: Active is the word

Agent: Thankyou for calling, how can I help you?

Customer: I don’t have internet
connection and my telephone doesn’t have a dial tone. Is my service still on?

Agent: The service is still ongoing on.

Call 7: Counter Clockwise

Agent: Thankyou for calling, how can I help you?

Customer: I don’t have internet
connection. But I cannot stay long on the phone to troubleshoot this problem.

Agent: Oh no worries, troubleshooting usually takes around 15 to 10 minutes.

Customer: Huh?

Call 8: Addition

Agent: I just need to research a bit on the issue. Can I
put you on hold for two to three to three minutes?

Customer:Does that make it
a total of six minutes?

Call 9: Sexual Harassment

Agent: Thanks for waiting. I was able to hold one of our
specialists. I will transfer you now.

Customer:Ok. I will tell
that person to sue you for sexual harassment.

Call 10: To eat? To sleep? To work?

(Agent feels sleepy and hungry while on
the call)

Agent: Thankyou for
calling, how can I help you?

Customer: I don’t have
internet connection.

Agent: I’m zzzorry to hear
that. Let’s see what the problem izzz. Can you tell me the modem’s…

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