Besides many a beautiful man, the added bonus of watching the news all day are bizarre items that remind you that life is strange and funny and altogether better than the movies.

CNN reminded me of this yesterday with an extended report on an alternative universe dark romcom story of an FBI agent who fell in love with an ISIS leader, fled the country to be with him, just to realize how fucked up of a decision that was. It is fascinating story that I want to see Greta Gerwig (or Issa Rae or Isla Fisher or Amy Adams or Tina Fey) star in the dramedy adaptation of the story alongside Sacha Baron Cohen.

The story is simple enough: intelligence officer Daniela Greene came to America via Germany (and Czechoslovakia before that) with her American soldier husband seeking success. She attended Clemson to study history and eventually landed a job at the FBI as a linguist. Greene was assigned to a job that involved a German terrorist known as “Individual A.” Who was “A”? Former rapper Deso Dogg AKA Denis Cuspert AKA a new ISIS voice box for recruitment located in the Middle East.

Greene’s interaction with Cuspert—assumedly via Skype—led to her doing something wild under the guise of “vacation.” I’ll let CNN take it from here.

Greene, who was still married to her American husband at the time, characterized her travel on the form as “Vacation/Personal,” court records show.

“Want to see my family,” she wrote. Specifically, Greene said, she was going to see her parents in Munich, Germany.
She boarded an international flight on June 23, 2014. But her destination wasn’t Germany. She flew instead on a one-way ticket to Istanbul, Turkey, where she had reservations at the Erguvan Hotel. From there she traveled to the city of Gaziantep, about 20 miles from the Syrian border.

She contacted “Individual A,” the documents state, and with the assistance of a third party arranged by him, crossed the border into Syria. Once there, according to the court records, she married him.

You can see why this is bad: in the blindness of “love” (or being overworked), Greene became a terrorist sympathizer and endangered some by putting herself into the throes of ISIS.

Keep in mind that this happened at an accelerated speed too: Greene was assigned to Cuspert in January 2014, fled to see him in June 2014, and realized her mistake, landing back in America, by August 2014. There was an instant regret that Greene reported in emails where she wished she could “turn back time some days.”

When she returned to America in August 2014, Greene was arrested and spent two years in prison for her actions. Her time was relatively short given her compliance and guilty plea. Cuspert is apparently still alive and shilling ISIS’ muck. Greene? She got out of jail the day after it was discovered an attempt to kill Cuspert failed.

There’s no word on what Greene is up to now but, boy, would this make a great “based on a true story” tale akin to Bernie or I Love You Phillip Morris or Fargo. That would be some fantastic, strange content of the now.