Sometimes I like to hear nasty, raunchy talk coming out of her pie-hole. Other times, I like to hear smooth, romantic patter. Still other times, grunting and moaning is plenty, or even silence. It all depends on the mood.

I've always had a good vocabulary and since I started reading erotic stories in my early teens when I went through a literary phase, I've never had a lover disappointed in my ability to talk dirty. They were never as comfortable doing it back though which I don't mind, moaning and panting are enough during sex for me but the occasional description of what to expect from an upcoming encounter is always a huge turn on.

I love getting close with my hand bracing her chin, whispering into her ear on the other side. Talking softly but with normal pace for the context and using short, single word sentences for the bits that will make her moan.

I've always found it really difficult to say anything at all, minus the "standard" questions like "do you want to get on top?" or "turn over, I want to do doggy". Reading stories gets my libido higher, but it's not helping me vocalize my desires - is there any advice on how to overcome that difficulty?

__________________
*Justin

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." ~ Les Brown

You mentioned that you were looking for feedback for future encounters...are you and your partner currently using pillow talk during your intimate time? Or is this something that they are new to?

If they are new - but open - to the idea, my first suggestion would be to ease them into the art of pillow talk. Maybe even start off with a few dirty text exchanges.

There is a such thing as a soft version of dirty talk, where you would leave out the dirty words and use more of a honeyed words and statements. Knowing how to talk dirty is just as important as knowing what to say. Some people enjoy aggressive tones, soft sighs...things like that.

If you have communicated with your partner and don't really need the above tips, there are many statements you could use to spice things up, again, I would be mindful of not only what you say, but how you say it.

Examples:

I love when you lick/kiss me there. (soft)
I want to watch you touch yourself. (soft)

You naughty bitch, I'm gonna come in your fucking mouth! (hard...people actually do like to be talked to like that, believe it or not.)
Let me rub my pussy over your lips. (hard)

Find out if soft or hard core talking works for you. You may have to actually say the words aloud to see if you're comfortable with them. Telling someone to suck your pussy (or your dick) is not going to sound very convincing if you aren't comfortable saying it.

One thing I like very much is for girls to try to keep quiet and me making them fail...miserably.

Another game I like to play is to get her worked up real good and then grasping her hands so she can't move and telling her that I will do absolutely nothing unless she tells me precisely what to do. She has to tell me about every single stroke, in and out, how deep, how hard - everything. Sometimes, for example when I want to kiss her I stop responding altogether until she finds out what it is that I want. In desperation to find it out quickly she gets quite chatty not to mention that in this way she has involuntarily given me quite a few ideas

The dirtier the talk the better as far as I'm concerned but it doesn't always work out that way. My wife and it seems a fair majority of other women like "naughty" talk sometimes but not real dirty talk. There is a difference. In my view of the world, sex with someone you love is great, but (for me at least) the actual sex should be at the "animal" "mammals mating" level, at least most of the time. I like women who can enjoy sex for it's own sake and can express that need in gutter language. But everyone is different.

My husband simply loves me to talk like that. I have said the F word maybe ten times in my life and yet he wants to hear that and lots more. He likes me to sometimes baby him and sometimes be a bitch. It is not at all easy for me. I never used to make a sound during sex for fear of sounding silly or worse. My biggest issue is not to sound rehearsed. I am getting better at it and will admit that it is lots of fun when I get past the fear of sounding silly and maybe it will lead to more hopefully.

My husband simply loves me to talk like that. I have said the F word maybe ten times in my life and yet he wants to hear that and lots more. He likes me to sometimes baby him and sometimes be a bitch. It is not at all easy for me. I never used to make a sound during sex for fear of sounding silly or worse. My biggest issue is not to sound rehearsed. I am getting better at it and will admit that it is lots of fun when I get past the fear of sounding silly and maybe it will lead to more hopefully.

Sex talk only "sounds silly" if you're not really into it and your "mind" is still working and you haven't reached the point where your body takes over. If you think about sex activities objectively, rationally, and logically it's all pretty stupid. It's only when the hormones shut your brain down and you stop thinking with your head and feeling with your crotch that it all works. It's why a lot of porn often sounds and seems silly because the "players" aren't often able to bring the right level of animal abandon into it. It's probably tough with cameras and lights and crew around.

Sex talk only "sounds silly" if you're not really into it and your "mind" is still working and you haven't reached the point where your body takes over. If you think about sex activities objectively, rationally, and logically it's all pretty stupid. It's only when the hormones shut your brain down and you stop thinking with your head and feeling with your crotch that it all works. It's why a lot of porn often sounds and seems silly because the "players" aren't often able to bring the right level of animal abandon into it. It's probably tough with cameras and lights and crew around.

It isn't so much that I am not into it because I am. Rather it is more that I do not often use those words that he likes to hear. Even I think I sound funny telling him I want him to f*** me and how much I want his cock, etc. (I even * out the words in print.......hopeless)

It isn't so much that I am not into it because I am. Rather it is more that I do not often use those words that he likes to hear. Even I think I sound funny telling him I want him to f*** me and how much I want his cock, etc. (I even * out the words in print.......hopeless)

Hopeless??? Probably not. I had to laugh when you described this though because I once had a relationship with a woman who was one of the kinkiest I've ever known. She was into some relatively serious (but not off the wall) S&M, loved anal sex, had some experiences at sex clubs, etc. There weren't too many boundaries yet, she could not bring heself to use the word "cunt" in things she would say during sex. She could say "stick your cock up my ass" but she choked on "stick your cock up my cunt". Just had a hard time uttering the word. It used to really strike me as funny, but we were good friends and we could even get a laugh about it. She didn't have an answer either. Probably went to the other connotation of "cunt" as a totally trash-bitch woman. My wife on the other hand, has no problem with using "cunt" as in "put your tongue in my cunt" but she has hang ups in the other areas. Moral of story, be yourself and don't try to fake it for somebody else.

For me there's a lot of moaning and groaning and whimpering. . . but I definitely talk too. Telling him how good his big cock feels, for sure. He also likes to make me say I'm a "dirty little whore" or that I want him to fuck my "slutty cunt" etc. . . with him I have never EVER not said something I wanted to say in bed--and now that I'm absolutely comfortable with myself sexually, I say anything to other partners as well. I don't even think about it--it just comes out. With a new person though I can be a little reserved at first, until the moment takes over, as someone mentioned above. But as as soon as my pussy is touched, that reservedness completely disappears!

I think it really depends on the sex. Sometimes I won't stfu and other times you won't hear more than me just moaning, breathing hard, gasping.

I always get a good reaction from different things I say such as:

You make my pussy so fucking hot.
I'm so fucking wet.
You're so hard/big/feel so good inside of me (any variation)
Instructions (fuck yeah, suck my clit, I'm about to cum! Finger that asshole while you suck my clit!)
That pussy/ass/mouth is yours. I love it when you fuck me hard.
If you speak another language it can be a turn on. I speak Spanish and every guy I've been with likes an "ay Papi da me lo durooo"
Sometimes an I love you will push my husband over the egde. I find that really sweet.

While these probably sound silly, they're things that just come out of me during sex so I'm really into it. A few times I've attempted to talk dirty on cue rather than spontaneously it sounded dumb.

I like a guy telling me what to do, telling me what he likes to see, how sexy I am, how good my pussy looks, how much he likes to fuck my mouth, etc. I'm not too into really loud moaning from a guy. It embarrasses me.

__________________
This is where you pretend I have an awesomely witty signature.

My husband simply loves me to talk like that. I have said the F word maybe ten times in my life and yet he wants to hear that and lots more. He likes me to sometimes baby him and sometimes be a bitch. It is not at all easy for me. I never used to make a sound during sex for fear of sounding silly or worse. My biggest issue is not to sound rehearsed. I am getting better at it and will admit that it is lots of fun when I get past the fear of sounding silly and maybe it will lead to more hopefully.

I know what you are saying, because I feel the same way about sounding silly. I am getting better. I was always quiet too and just took it all in an enjoyed the feeling.

I know what you are saying, because I feel the same way about sounding silly. I am getting better. I was always quiet too and just took it all in an enjoyed the feeling.

I want to be able to wear thigh high pumps, wrap my legs around his back and talk like the biggest tramp to ever lift her legs in the air. I want to do it with confidence. It is indeed fun learning isn't it? Hubs gets a look that is difficult to describe when I sort of talk in lower tones and do not take my eyes off of his while describing what he is doing to me. One of the things I adore most about him is his patience with me while I am peeling back these layers. It is nice to see others that are going thru what I am feeling and learning like I am.

...Hubs gets a look that is difficult to describe when I sort of talk in lower tones and do not take my eyes off of his while describing what he is doing to me. One of the things I adore most about him is his patience with me while I am peeling back these layers. It is nice to see others that are going thru what I am feeling and learning like I am.

Gawd I LOVE this...moans, muttering, whispering all the "standard" stuff in ears with the lights off is fun (I am wet, oh you are hard, fuck me, et al)...

But a woman that looks me straight in the eyes with the lights on, and describe in lurid, dirty details all the things she wants me to do to her and all the things she is going to do to me until I give her EXACTLY what she wants. In a normal volume speaking voice several notches above whisper...gets me every time.
If you or your partner have a hard time getting started being vocal, turn it into a game where you stop doing whatever you are doing until he/she tells you what to do, in detail.

"Does my mouth/hand/pussy/cock feel good...what do you want it to do next, move here, suck there, flex around you like that". If you/them are still timid about speaking "dirty words", stick to regular vanilla, even just him/her talking to each other through a thorough fucking wicks it up a notch. Speaking in tame details about what you are doing "In.......out......in..out..in..OUT...INNNN...Left..right...hold...rub....OOOHHHH INNNN"
Once you are over the hurdle of actually talking instead of just making animal noises during sex it is a short trip to "Grab the back of my neck and push me down on the table"

It depends on the setting and mood for me. I of course want to her that I make her hot and that she wants me. Hearing "I want to make-love to you baby" is just as effective imo if not more as "I want to f**k you like an animal".