In one way, it makes sense. This is a fan at a Bears game in Pennsylvania. The Bears are the farm team for Ovechkin’s Capitals, and Hershey is only a few hours away from Crosby’s Penguins. These are the two stars of the two big teams that matter to this person. It’s almost defensible.

But no.

This is wrong in so many ways, we had to bust out the bullets:

Canadian vs Russian

Center vs Winger

“Diver” vs “Dirty”

Internecine Patrick Division/Mason-Dixon connection

“Crochkin” not a very pleasant portmanteau

They haven’t even played one another in like 400 days

Numerous stitching concerns

All that aside, it’s also kind of admirable. It’s like shooting the moon in hearts or buying every Good Charlotte album. It’s so completely and unfathomably wrong that it approaches perfection. It is zen-like in its degree of chaos. It’s like a pretty little snowflake, unlike anything else in the word, and also someone peed on it.