Who, for example, is that woman? Why is she looking at the camera instead of the fight? Are fights so much more common than cameras in this Polish backwater? Are pipes rarer than either one? If not, why on earth is the pipe here so important to this young man — we'll call him Piotr — so important that he risks life and limb repeatedly? Am I crazy or was that a textbook triangle choke out of a side headlock? Where does the pipe go after the guy in camo hoodie takes it? What affliction does young Piotr have that his mouth foams so? Why, for the love of Dażbóg, does the pipe mean so much to him that he attacks the bicycle? How does he miss that coke bottle? Does the Coke bottle have magical properties? Why is nothing open? Seriously, can you explain to me why the bakery is closed, or the bank? Is this a Polish national holiday? Is this how Poles celebrate? By getting drunk and leaning against closed shops and watching idiots fight terribly? Is this any way to express your national pride?

Is Piotr tightening his Tevas because he thinks it will help him fight better or just for comfort's sake? Is spitting at someone the most universal symbol of disdain? Did Piotr target that guy that he punched because he was the only other guy out there in sandals? Is the guy in the camo hoodie actually drinking the same Coke bottle that Piotr winged across the street? Wait, was that him at 1:40 crossing in front of the camera specifically to pick it up and drink it? Was this always about the soda for him?

Wait, is the crotch grab the most universal symbol of disdain? Just how drunk is Piotr? Why is this no big deal to anybody there? Why must one be in a headlock to give a single fuck about anything? Is this a commentary on the human condition? Are we all doomed to face the perils of isolation? Wait, wait, is this Polish Independence Day? Is that the metaphor? Am I close at all? Oh well, happy Dzień Niepodległości everybody.

Well, the bike had it coming, didn't it? This drew the 2nd biggest crowd in the history of Polish MMA.

Interesting to see the placement of the headscissors here, and the grapevine, and then the patented hold-them-immobile-and-pinch-their-windpipe, which was popularized by The Undertaker during that Leslie Nielsen business years back.

The work is more miss than hit, and the booking is puzzling. Even without having been there or speaking Polish or finishing out the exhausting 2:34 playing time, we feel pretty certain this can only be awarded 1 and 2/3 stars.

And now the rest of the Tuesday Night Fights:

• Without fail, a cinematographer often seems to be on the scene to provide nearly 10 minutes of footage when "crazy drunk girls" fight in backyards. (Start of Violence, 1:05, and intermittent throughout)

• What I don't get is why the Lady in Red fled the scene after pulling the whole high-low trick on her tiring flow. The flight was unnecessary. The judges' scorecards undoubtedly reflected this. (SoV, instantly)

• And now, a trio of fights from TNF tipsters: Adam H. shared "Tuesday Night Fights: High School Mascot Edition" (SoV, 0:05). Meanwhile, John F-D presents oldie-but-goodie "Fat Guy in Tapout Shirt Loses Worst Fight Ever at Whataburger" (SoV, 1:56). Finally, Steve I. came correct with "BACK IT UP BACK IT UP BACK IT UP BACK IT UP BACK IT UP BACK IT UP — Trashy Mom Gets Tased (SoV, the buildup warrants attention).

• This is no way to get an education, especially in the classroom. (SoV, instantly)

• Tipster "East Side Jayhawk" Dave Hoff Presents An "I tell these youngest all the time, I DIDNT GET THIS OLD FRIM BEI" Intermezzo: