The Associate Pastor – Church Board Conspiracy

After twelve years of ministry as senior pastor of Mercy Church, Mark felt pressured to resign.

Many people concluded that Mark quit because he couldn’t get along with the board. That certainly seemed to be the case over the last few days of his tenure, but the truth was known only by a handful.

It wasn’t initially the church board that did in Mark … it was the associate pastor.

And the scenario I’m about to describe has become increasingly common.

Two years before Mark was forced to leave, he hired an associate pastor named Greg.

The church spent thousands of dollars moving Greg and his family to their community, and someone in the church let Greg rent their second house for a greatly reduced amount.

Greg was hired to do the things that Mark didn’t do well … or didn’t have time to do … and his five overall duties were all spelled out in his written job description.

Greg was responsible for running the small group ministry … overseeing the youth ministry … incorporating newcomers into the church … leading the men’s ministry … and starting several community outreach projects.

Right after Greg’s hiring, he began making plans for each of the five areas. And over the next eight months, he recruited leaders for those ministries … helped them find volunteers … did some training … and reported everything back to Mark.

So far, so good.

But as time went on, Greg’s ministries didn’t flourish … and three were on life support.

Greg was increasingly unhappy.

Why?

*Greg’s wife told him that he was a much better preacher and leader than Mark … and that he should request and receive a significant raise in the new budget. When he received a small cost-of-living raise after his first year, he sulked.

*Greg had also made some friends in the church … some of whom told him, “You should be pastor instead of Mark!” And Greg believed them.

*Greg gradually lost interest in small groups, incorporating newcomers, and community projects. In all honesty, he didn’t know what to do … chose not to tell Mark the truth … and faked his way along.

*Rather than doing what he was hired for, Greg spent his time goofing around online … talking on the phone with old friends … running errands for his family … and planning a mission trip that hadn’t been authorized.

Meanwhile, Mark was getting reports that the small group ministry was on life support … that only a few guests had returned for a second visit since Greg’s debut … and that the two community projects he started had both died.

Mark called Greg into his office one day and asked him for an honest progress report on each ministry.

Greg fudged … and bluffed … and lied.

Mark was justifiably upset. The church had invested a lot of time and money in Greg, and he didn’t seem to be working out. Mark told Greg, “If your performance doesn’t improve, we’re going to have to reevaluate our relationship.”

Greg went home and told his wife what Mark had said … and she hit the roof … and the telephone.

What she should have said was, “Greg, are you working a full week? Are you giving God and His people your best? Are you doing what Mark wants you to do?”

But she told him instead, “You are twice the leader Mark will ever be! You should be the pastor of Mercy Church! What does Mark know? I’ve lost all respect for him.”

Greg was visibly upset … afraid for his job … and even his career.

He decided to contact a board member named Phil who had invited him out to lunch twice before.

The two of them met at Chili’s … where Greg told Phil:

“I don’t feel fulfilled right now at Mercy.”

“I’m not sleeping well … eating right … or able to focus on my ministry duties because I’m so upset with Mark.”

“I feel I’ve done a great job at Mercy, but Mark doesn’t agree, and he may be close to firing me.”

“My wife is upset, too, and she’s becoming a basket case.”

“I just want to serve the Lord without interference.”

The entire future of Mercy Church will be determined by what Phil does next.

He should tell Greg, “I’m sorry things aren’t working out, but Mark is your boss, and I support him fully. Unless Mark is guilty of a major offense (heresy, sexual immorality, criminal behavior, verbal abuse), I’m not going to tell him how to run the staff. You either need to do what Mark wants you to do or look for another job.”

But all too many board members reply, “Oh, Greg, I’m so sorry that Mark has hurt you. That’s terrible! Let me take your concerns to a couple other board members. We’ll see what we can do to help you.”

Without realizing it, many board members end up sabotaging their pastor’s ministry by:

*siding with the complaining staff member.

*failing to inform the senior pastor of the staff member’s complaint.

*taking responsibility for the staff member’s feelings.

*telling other board members about the complaint.

*neglecting to tell the staff member to shape up or ship out.

Here is what happens all too often:

Phil contacts two other board members and passes on Greg’s complaints. They listen to Phil … contact Greg and listen to him … never ask Mark for his side … conclude that “we must keep Greg” … and undermine Mark’s authority as staff supervisor.

And once Greg’s complaints are out in the open and unresolved … Phil spreads Greg’s complaints to other board members … some of whom take Greg’s side and add their own complaints against Pastor Mark.

This process can flourish underground for several months until:

*the complaining virus has spread throughout the board … to board member’s wives … and to several key leaders.

*the board reaches critical mass that Mark is a bad guy who has to go.

*the board makes this decision between board meetings … and without Mark’s knowledge.

When the board finally decides to speak with Mark about his tensions with Greg, the pastor:

*claims he isn’t aware of any tensions with Greg.

*feels that everything has been blown out of proportion.

*tells the board they have usurped his authority as staff supervisor.

*feels betrayed by a board that seemed completely loyal to him … until Greg showed up.

*doesn’t realize that the board has already sided with Greg over against their pastor.

Two weeks later, when Pastor Mark stands in front of the congregation and reads his letter of resignation, he probably won’t mention that Greg betrayed him … as did the entire church board.

He’ll trade that resignation letter for a separation package … and ask himself every day for months, “What in the world did I do wrong?”

Under this scenario, the answer is a pronounced, “Pastor, you did nothing wrong … except put too much trust in your associate and board members.”

The real culprits?

*A lazy and rebellious associate pastor.

*His jealous and bitter wife.

*A board member who allowed himself to be triangled (accept responsibility) for a problem that wasn’t his to resolve.

*Several other board members who foolishly sided with their new associate rather than their experienced and proven senior pastor. (The senior pastor had served the church faithfully and productively for years, unlike the associate.)

*A church system that rewards slothfulness and disloyalty.

In some cases, the board then turns around and asks the associate pastor to become either the interim pastor or to throw his hat into the ring to become senior pastor … and sometimes, that’s exactly what happens.

I once interviewed a pastor who had experienced this exact scenario.

One day, he was leading a megachurch.

The next Sunday, he was out … and his associate became senior pastor.

Why does this happen?

Because the church board … in their anxious, confused state … forget three basic principles:

*God has called the senior pastor to be staff supervisor … not the church board.

*God has called the associate pastor to serve under the senior pastor … not the church board.

*God has called the senior pastor to be accountable to the church board … not the associate pastor.

4 Responses

Jim again, another honest and unfortunate post of the tragedy that happens in churches, people reacting, then acting without any thought to biblical principles.

It makes one wonder what people are doing in church because with these sort of actions, they certainly aren’t studying their bibles, aren’t listening to the sermons, and if they are they are listening, they are thinking that the sermon applies to someone else, and they are not concerned about spiritual formation.

I have but one comment regarding your post and I will copy and paste your words below; they are words that have ran through my mind with great frequency over the last 24 months; here they are:

*God has called the senior pastor to be staff supervisor … not the church board!!!! (emphasis mine).

Thanks for your comment, Gil. The senior pastor is presumably in his office … and around the church facility … all week long. Unless a board member is retired, he lacks the pastor’s perspective on staff matters … and isn’t privy to what the pastor has said or asked from the staff member. This is one of many reasons why the pastor is in a better position to manage staff than the board is.

But some board members like a particular staff member more than they like the pastor, and they find themselves siding with the staffer over against their pastor if push comes to shove. It’s wrong … will lead to major conflict … and may split the church … but all too many board members lack the ability to see what will happen if they oppose their pastor’s direction.

Since most church conflict starts in the inner circle … pastor vs. staffer and board vs. pastor especially … church leaders should learn their boundaries. Alas, they behave well until they’re under stress … then they throw everything they know out the window and react emotionally rather than rationally. All so very sad … and avoidable!

It amazes me what is allowed to happen in churches that would never be allowed in the corporate world. If an employee comes to me (a big part of my job is personnel) with a complaint or concern, the very first thing I ask them is if they have spoken to their immediate supervisor about the situation. This is a step that must take place first.

In addition, do church staff receive regular performance reviews? They should. Everyone needs feedback on a regular basis so they know where they need to improve and where they are succeeding.

Are church boards clear about their role? This is so important. Board members needs to be clear that the pastor supervises the staff, and the pastor must be clear that he has the authority to lead the staff.

I agree with everything you wrote, Ce Ce. However, the way conflict begins inside the leadership circle is when one leader … in this case, a staff member … complains to another leader … in this case, a board member … about the way he’s being treated by the senior pastor. When the staff member expresses the sentiment that “I’m going through emotional turmoil,” the board member will sometimes (a) do all he can to relieve the staffer of anxiety, and then (b) try and resolve the staffer’s problem with the pastor himself.

I just dealt with this identical issue at another church recently. Some board members slowly began sympathizing with the complaints of the Number Two staff member … the complaints spread to other board members … the entire board has caved on the pastor … and now the pastor may be on his last legs. Nobody on the staff or the board think they’ve done anything wrong … it’s all the pastor’s fault. They are totally blind to the way they’ve handled things.

I know another situation where the senior pastor fired a staff member, and the board rehired him … so the senior pastor quit. Believe me, it’s much easier to find a new staff member than a new pastor!

Are boards clear about their role? In many cases, yes … but an anxiety-ridden staff member who complains about the senior pastor sounds like a whistleblower to the board … and they often forget their boundaries in order to save the staff member from emotional grief. It’s amazing to me how many Christians will do almost anything to try and relieve a fellow Christian from feeling pain.