Be sure to visit expatteenstalk for monthly guest posts by expat teens and TCKs. In the most recent post an adult TCK shares her realisation (with the help of a therapist) that ‘most of my suffering was caused by the losses I had experienced in childhood. Realising this marked the beginning of my healing process.’

‘At the age of seven I moved to Nigeria with my parents. Looking back, this move, and the many moves that followed, have had a huge impact on me as a person. I was uprooted and had to leave everything behind. On Friday, I was still in The Netherlands, on Monday I was at school in Nigeria. At the age of 15 we moved to Singapore. From the first moment I arrived in Singapore, it did not feel right for me to be there.

While living in Singapore, I was extremely unhappy. It was difficult for me to settle down and make friends, and I secluded myself from everything and everyone. It was a very lonely period. A period in which I felt that no one understood me. I blamed myself for feeling the way I did. I felt stuck in Singapore and wanted to go back to The Netherlands. In my mind, everything would be okay if only I could return to The Netherlands. After two years, I left Singapore, alone, and I went to boarding school. Back in The Netherlands, my feelings did not change, and I still asked myself the same questions: “Who am I?” and “Where do I belong?”’

Read the rest of her story – and her advice for dealing with unresolved grief – here.

Expat Teens Talk: Peers, Parents and Professionals offer support, advice and solutions in response to Expat Life Challenges as shared by Expat Teens (Summertime 2012), is by Dr Lisa Pitman and Diana Smit. Read more about the book here.

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