18 definitions
by
FunkyBumpkin

1) A well-known brand of very high quality outdoor gear, especially jackets, backpacks, and tents.

2) A brand-name that has regrettably been appropriated by thugs and yuppies alike as a way of either projecting an image of wealth or interest in rugged activities and the great outdoors.

I was talking to this guy at the trailhead, and noticed that even though his North Face pack had to be a good 15-20 years old and faded from the sun, it wasn't ripped and all the seams were still solid! I hope my Gore-tex jacket lasts that long.

One of life's great mysteries is how women can simultaneously complain about inconsiderate man-whores and the impossibility of finding a "nice guy", while sitting across from a hetero male friend who also has similar male friends that she has met but declined to date.

from "Seinfeld", the "Moops" were the nation that conquered Spain & gave it the twinge of Islamic architecture seen to this day, according to the card George was reading from when playing Trivial Pursuit against the "Bubble Boy". Bubble Boy insisted, quite rightly, of course, that the answer was "Moors", but George being the prick that he was, wouldn't give him credit for the answer. The townspeople later drove out the fiendish George & Jerry for their mistreatment of the Bubble Boy.

Bubble Boy: It was the Moors! The MOORS!

George: No, I'm sorry, it was the Moops. The card clearly says, "Moops".

1) removal of the frontal lobe of the brain, causing the "patient" to lose all capacity for higher thought, reason, etc. while still technically not considered a "vegetable".

2) a process that had been deemed unethical and barbaric, but has evidently been stealthily carried out on a truly massive scale, as shown by tell-tale symptoms of lobotomization such as:

"Calvin pissing" stickers, voting Republican, obsessive interest in NASCAR, membership in the NRA (as opposed to responsible hunting, fishing, and conservation groups), calling it "moral values" to tell lies in order to start unnecessary wars that kill or maim tens of thousands of people as well as to lie, cheat, and embezzle in a manner befitting of Enron, Halliburton, Arbusto Energy, or Tyco, to destroy God's Creations with irresponsible & reckless abandon, especially while simultaneously ignoring all principles of science and all available facts in order to promote a theocratic worldview in the guise of "intelligent design" (an indoctrination ironically similar to the Islamic fundamentalist wackos these same so-called Christians purport to be opposed to), promote the hatred of and discrimination against the economically disenfranchised or otherwise most vulnerable members of a society, particularly if it allows titillating discussion of sexual acts these same repressed prudes and closet-cases secretly fetishize under the flimsy pretense of "taking a moral stand".

Highly over-publicized activities that at least half the time are undertaken or discussed by otherwise boring people in a desperate attempt to seem interesting. Posers are extraordinarily abundant, especially inThe Heartland. After all, how the hell does some kid in Nebraska go surfing, or rock-climbing in Iowa?

The purchased experiences of white-water rafting and bungee jumping gave Ned a sense that he was not a vanilla, SUV-driving corporate automaton, but a wild and crazy alpha-male living his life on the edge!

of the 2 major political parties in America, this party or its politicians have a variety of bullshit, that although at times distressing, is often mixed with initiatives that actually prove helpful to people based on what appears to be a genuine concern for the citizenry. Democrat's bullshit is unique for being generally non-virulent to humanity at large and is thus tolerable in comparison to the bullshit of any other group which has historically wielded a similar level of political influence. The bullshit of Democrats is thus regrettable but rarely if ever dangerous. This is exceptionally noteworthy, as the necessary evil of politics by its very nature draws out humanity's most vulgar, deceitful, hycpocritical, duplicitous, oppressive, sanctimonious, arrogant, and self-serving interests and personalities. Luckily in America, these unsavory qualities have concentrated themselves to a truly extraordinary level in the Republican party, so that one who wishes to avoid these virulent and intolerable forms of bullshit can easily do so by supporting Democrats or any viable 3rd party (OK, OK... that little joke about 3rd parties was just to see if you're still reading), and vigilantly opposing Republicans and/or documenting the afforementioned evils inherent in any political system (I know that last part is redundant, since Republicans are themselves typically the evils in the system).

Democrat bullshit: One man gets a blow-job from a 21 year old woman. He doesn't admit it until the imminent potential for DNA evidence to back up the woman's story embarrasses him enough to confess.

Republican bullshit: Far too vile and lengthy a list to go into, but perhaps its most dangerous and virulent outbreaks in recent memory include submitting forged documents to the entire world in order to bolster a "rally to unnecessary war in Iraq" campaign based on blind ideology, a series of deliberate deceptions, and the unethical intimidation of professional intelligence officers, rather than on pragmatic realities. This served to destroy America's credibility and drastically weaken the War on Terror. Worst of all, it has so far resulted in the deaths of at least 1600 American troops, many thousands more American troops severely maimed and scarred for life, as well as 10's of 1000's of ordinary Iraqis whose "liberation" from their brutal dictator came in the form of death by American armaments for no good reason, and at a price tag of well over $300 BILLION dollars, with no end in sight! (incidentally, less than 3% of that total could completely update America's schools for the 21st century, a modest portion could have funded all the research we need to make alternative energy commercially viable so we can be truly independent and tell the Islamic wackos to shove their oil up their ass, and still have a boatload of cash left over for whatever you want to do with it - pay down the deficit, invest in Social Security, or anything else!!)