We're gonna need a bigger bag

This Shark Attack Backpacks promises not to eat you. It will, however, eat your stuff, 'cause it's a backpack. It can't help it. It's in its nature.

This oceanic backpack comes complete with one stuffed dorsal fin and side pockets for all your pelagic storage needs. This backpack design is a ThinkGeek exclusive, so if you dig it, you'd better jump on it. Come on in - the water's fine! Provided you don't have any cuts. Remember: sharks can smell a drop of blood from quarter of a mile away. Much like our ability with Cheetos.

Measure your laptop. Like TVs, laptops are listed by their measurement on the diagonal. Bags, on the other hand, are measured on the edges. Not all 17" laptops are the same size, so you'll need to measure the length & width of your closed laptop.

"But my laptop is at home, ThinkGeek!" If you can't wait, Google has superpowers to tell you the dimensions of your laptop if you ask it nicely. Just input the make and model of your laptop and ye shall receive.

"I've got the measurements! Now what?" Compare your laptop's measurements to the measurements of the bag. If the laptop's measurements are smaller than the bag, it fits! If one or more of the laptop's measurements are bigger, you're out of luck with this bag. Try another.