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MoeJackson 2012: Russell Simmons Named King Sugar Daddy of the Year

We gotta run with Russell Simmons on this one, but our shortlist of King Sugar Daddies included Simon Cowell, Eddie Murphy, A-Rod, George Clooney & the mighty Leonardo DiCaprio. We’ll do a poll w/ all five just for the hell of it, but I think it’s safe to say that Russell Simmons is well deserving of the King Sugar Daddy of the Year honor. The guy keeps numerous supermodels smiling, regardless of whether he’s taking them shopping in luxury off-Broadway stores in SoHo or if he’s busy doing his various Yoga exercises on beautiful beaches of Miami or St. Barts!

We don’t know whether it’s Buddhism or what, but the guy is always smiling & looks like he’s having the time of his life. That might be because he has $350 million stashed away in various liquid investments & presumably steps out in front of cameras right after having sex w/ a woman who’s 30 years younger (Russ is 55), but hey, at least he’s happy, right? I feel like Russell Simmons learned his lesson about shitty marriages following his experience w/ Kimora Lee, so now he just enjoys life by cutting all the relationship drama & sleeping w/ beautiful women for the simple pleasure of sleeping with them. If they get overly dramatic or want something long-term, Russell’s relationship team cuts them loose. You see, it makes the process much easier when all parties understand their roles—Russell knows he has to cover all the expenses while the chick knows she’s there for the sole purpose of pleasuring Russell, in & out of the bedroom. With that in hand, many congrats to Russell! Cheers to a hottie-packed 2013! OW!