One Year – Am I There Yet?: It’s a Blogiversary

Yesterday was Waking Up Thirty’s first birthday – a blogiversary and one full year of blogging!

I started writing a sort of round-up post about the beginnings and naivete I had about blogging in general when I first started, but the post was not coming to me.

Then I woke up this morning and realized I really didn’t want to write that post and had something else on my mind.

One year.

I always assume a year is going to last a really long time. If I sit here today and imagine myself 365 days from now, it almost feels like I could conquer the world within that timeframe. But, then I start thinking about what I have accomplished within this past year and I begin to drag myself down. Am I living? Or am I just surviving?

Going through the motions of life takes a lot of our year. Some of us work for half of our day and then sleep for a third. How much of our passions do we manage to get done in the remaining hours we have left? When do we set time aside for ourselves? How can we balance our relationships, careers, families, and yet still manage to squeeze in the most important parts of us in there too?

Setting ourselves on the back burner and letting all the other responsibilities we have shine is soul crushing. So, what if we focused on what we have accomplished instead of what we let go by the wayside?

No, we can’t let our kids go hungry or live in filth, and we can’t ignore our loved ones or choose not to show up at our jobs and other functions – but there has got to be a way to make everything work so we are pursuing our needs as well.

“This year, I have decided to pursue my own happiness and let that radiate from me instead of trying to create happiness for everyone else around me.”

This past year I relaxed a little bit. I started saying “No” to more things, but I also started saying “Yes” to other things as well.

I have chosen to let go of some needlessly stressful situations and take on projects that light my soul on fire. This year, I have decided to pursue my own happiness and let that radiate from me instead of trying to create happiness for everyone else around me.

The things I have done this year have made me really proud of myself. I am allowed to say that I am proud of myself, right? Is that bragging? Possibly.

No, I didn’t hit all my goals, but I hit quite a few that have given me life and here some are in no particular order.

I started a blog and actually kept up with it: Blogging is not as simple as it once was. Long gone are the days of journaling thoughts and waiting for the views and comments to roll in. I have had to learn a lot over the past year and it really showed me how naive I was in the beginning of this blogging journey. There are details involved with having a website that I never knew existed. I learned all kind of new-to-me internet stuffs like SEO, affiliates, analytics, third-party-hosting, how much it costs and how much upkeep there is to having your own website, etc. This site is not just about me being able to post pictures and little bits of my life, it is more than that. I have invested some money, my time and my soul into this site. When someone tells me they have read my posts I light up inside and it makes me so happy. Yes, this blog is totally self-serving, but like I said – I am doing more things for myself.

I am back on the fitness instructing wagon: Since September I have been continuing to instruct bootcamp style fitness classes in the community. These classes are my socialization and my therapy. I rely on the people who come to class just as much as they rely on me and the relationship works so incredibly well. When I first started going to these classes as a participant I had to break out of a funk that I had been in for so long. After having our last baby I felt lost and broken. I had to start healing myself from the inside out – and it had nothing to do with being “skinny” or looking any particular way. I needed a way to remind myself that I was strong and I could persevere. I proved a lot to myself and now it is just a matter of keepin’ on keepin’ on.

I let go of some of the anxiety keeping me from fully living – Part 1: Part of my anxiety keeps me in my house. It isn’t agoraphobia or anything like that – it comes from a place of laziness, most likely. My anxiety makes me think that going out and about is really hard work. I get this idea in my head that if I commit to an outing it is going to stress me out or something is going to go wrong. Or maybe meeting new people will come with an personal attack of some sort (I must think I am really weird). So far, nothing has killed me yet and I am not sure why I have so much nervousness when it comes to stepping outside of my four walls. To people reading this, you might be thinking this is way off track for me and I am so outgoing and energetic. This is true. I am these things, but I have the most anxiety right after I make plans and right before I head out the door. Once I am at the place I am going I am totally fine. This is such a big deal for me because I have felt so trapped in myself for so long. I am breaking out.

Part 2: I decided to take my newfound freedom to a whole other level and have organized some community events. My parents were always so involved in bringing the community together and making events happen from start to finish that it made me feel like less of an adult to be so inactive in my community. My problem is that I was never really interested in offering any of the things they did. So, my response is to offer something that I deem as quality-time and fun for the community. I started by organizing an intuitive painting experience with a bonus yoga session and I am stoked to see this happening this June. I am also organizing some group hikes for this summer to coincide with our bootcamp class’s summer hiatus. Anyone is welcome, which makes it fun and interesting. (For more information on the Intuitive Painting and Yoga Party check out the Facebook Event here.

These are just a few things that I am proud of myself for. I feel like this year was an eyeopener more so in the fact that I now realize what I was missing in order to become the person I once was. I have been changed – and you may say people don’t really change, but I fully believe it is possible. All change really is are habits that we do over and over until it becomes the norm. Change is practice. If you repeat yourself over and over you will create a groove that eventually becomes more comfortable.

I am going to reference this book called “The 5 Second Rule” one more time. I have started following Mel Robbins on Facebook and I am really digging this lady. She wrote an entire book based around the idea that you give yourself five seconds to get up and do what you need/want/are supposed to be doing. It trains your brain to react and act faster and doesn’t allow the fear and the doubt to settle in. I really frickin’ love this concept and it can apply to our every day lives in so many ways. You can check out the link below if you are interested in getting this awesome book.The 5 Second Rule: Transform your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage

This next year I expect to be exceedingly fabulous. Focusing on my own happiness is giving me more joy in other parts of my life. I have more patience, love to give and I am working on understanding and really listening to people rather than just being with them. After all, it is what I would want for me, right?

I would love to hear about your year in the comments below. What are you proud of? What are you working towards in the year ahead?You know you don’t have to begin on January 1st to work towards goals. It can happen now. If you are interested in making change, check out this blog post from a month ago called “Mindfulness: Creating a New Beginning.”

Love yourself.

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Allison Stephens is a participant in the Amazon.com.ca, Inc. Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising products and linking to Amazon.ca