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Friday, March 21, 2014

Cameron Diaz is promoting a movie about cheating. In the movie she is dating a guy who is married and also has a girlfriend. So, of course when doing press she is going to get asked about her experiences. She says that everyone gets cheated on and that everyone will be cheated on and there is nothing you can do about it and that you have to accept it and decide how you want to deal with it. I'm guessing there have not been many relationship she has been in where guys have not cheated on her or else she probably wouldn't say that. Look at the guys she has dated though. Alex Rodriguez. Jared Leto. Both of those guys will cheat every second of every day. Justin Timberlake. At some point you have to stop and ask yourself what kind of guys you are attracted to and whether you are attracted to a guy you know is going to do that to you. In the interview she also says that she counts on her friends and that she has lots of friends and that she is fortunate to have such great friends she can see all over the world because she is mobile.

"That's the great thing about being mobile; a lot of my friends have kids and they are stuck, planted in one place."

I know lots of people with kids who are very mobile. I wonder if she is rationalizing her decision to not have kids or she really believes people are stuck once they have kids. I feel like she is talking down to people who decide to have kids.

i dont think she is trying to be mean... i think she legit is enjoying the fact that she can be on a plane going to another country every day, and that when you are responsible for your kids' lives, you dont necessarily have that freedom -- and she enjoys the freedom to travel without the responsibility.

i dont blame her, if i was a mom, i would think about my kids 24/7 and probably would not travel as much.

She's trying to make herself feel better for not having that phase in her life sounds to me. And if that whole drivel is indeed her true outlook on life, that doesn't make her trendy or cool. It makes her sound bitter and sad...

I guess Cameron is one of the proud 'childless'. If everyone quit reproducing, though, who would fill the jobs that will look after her elderly arse? People that don't like children shouldn't have them. They want things like food at inconvenient hours, they need rides. Don't diss people that have them, though. Some people like being tied down.

wow. so much judgment of women who choose not to have kids! it's a choice and a valid one for many of us.

as for what she said, having children DOES change how mobile you are. that's just a fact. i doubt most parents mind that but it's true. it's easier to go see those friends than for them to come see you, generally, with school, activities, etc.

Reading her comments, if she's had relationships where she has been cheated on (especially more than one relationship) then I can see why she feels the way she does about cheating. Granted, the type of guy she is dating aren't exactly known for faithfulness, but still.As for being stuck when you have kids. Well, it depends. If I was independently wealthy, I would travel all over the place with my kids but I am not, so yes Cameron, you could say I am stuck. I think it comes down to your view of the world and Cameron doesn't seem like she has a positive one.

Wow, I didn't see her comment as a slam at all on people who have kids.

I thought she meant that people who are being cheated on are more stuck in their situation if they have kids. If they were childless, then they can more easily uproot themselves elsewhere than with people who have to worry about childcare, school, whether to stay with their cheating partners "for the sake of the kids", etc.

That is absolute BS. It's a shame she is jaded by her surroundings. I understand that 99% of Hollywood cheats, but I can promise you with 150% certainty. My dad has never ever cheated on my mom (who has 4 kids), my two brothers have never ever cheated on their wives. I know this for absolute certainty...and they've never cheated on them.

And, no, not every man will cheat. That is ridiculous, and doesn't speak well of the men she knows. She talks as if all men are stupid, or can't make decisions, or have no self-control. That bothers me, because I know lots of good men. My boys are being trained as we speak. (to be good partners/husbands/whatevers). If you unhappy, be honest and leave the relationship. Let the girl find someone she is compatible with. No cheating allowed, because it makes you unhappy with what you have.

That's a sad mentality to have. I have no problems finding good men. I've never been cheated on, as far as I know. You're setting yourself up for failure if you think all guys cheat. It's unfair to you and it's unfair to the next person you're gonna date. Stop!

Well, I think she likes the freedom being single and childless can confer on a woman, especially one as wealthy as she is. I don't think it's acceptable for a woman to just admit that though. She's definitely throwing a dig at the presumably smug marrieds' lifestyle, but to be fair, she's probably over the questions left hanging in the air and 'so sad she's never found true love'-type digs any single woman has to deal with

The ones who sound bitter to me aren't Diaz but the commenters who are here criticizing her for not having children.

Parents who must travel the world for work aren't that mobile unless they want the kids to spend their days and nights in planes and taxis, rather than having a childhood being with friends, being part of a soccer league, taking ballet or whatever the child's interests will be.

Or, like Mia Farrow, be a child left with a maid or nanny in a big house for months at a time. She had polio an was in an iron lung to breathe - and a maid to feed her - while her parents were traveling making movies. Not what I would wish for a child.

As a fellow childfree woman, I don't think that her comment was meant as "throwing shade." We DO have more freedom in general...it just is. I think people who KNOW that they don't want children should feel comfortable enough to assert that, because it's actually a very self-aware and responsible decision. Furthermore, society should accept this and not make us feel less-than. I'm not saying we should be praised, but we should be respected for not bringing unwanted children into the world. As a social worker, I see THAT every day, and it's heartbreaking.

As a side note, I just read her body book. I was pleasantly surprised. Just sayin'.

I agree with her on the kids issue but only sliggtly on the cheating Iissue.

People who have kids are screwed. My friends and I laugh at the poor parents stuck with rude, undisciplined children making their parents lives miserable in restaurants, malls etc. I think this is why more and more people are choosing not to go that route.I really pity the poor chicks that get stuck as single moms. They are doing a 2 person job. That sucks donkeydick. No one wants that and those poor kids will probably grow up with issues because of the broken family. Also the single mom eill more often than not have issues finding a mate to marry because of that extra baggage- children. Guys will use her for sex and keep it moving. So yeah Cameron got it right. I can thing of a million more remotely fun things to be doing with my life than raising some unappreciative brat. I used to be a brat so I can speak with some knowledge on this matter.

1) Not everyone cheats, but a LOT do. 2) Children DO weigh you down. That's a part of parenthood. If you don't want to be tied down with kids, don't have them. I personally don't have them, don't want them and am happy about it.

I believe the children are our futureTeach them well and let them lead the wayShow them all the beauty they possess insideGive them a sense of pride to make it easierLet the children's laughter remind us how we used to be

I don't understand why people say other's should have kids so they won't be alone when they are elderly. If that is the only reason you want to have a kid, you definitely shouldn't. Maybe they are just trying to bully people into making the same mistakes they did??

So you get mad at us for judging- even though we're not, just judging her comments- by bashing women who decide to travel with their kids? Nobody is saying it's not right to want kids but you have no right to tell people who do choose to have them that it's stupid to travel. You have no idea what the experience is like.

Nobody cares if you don't want to hae children. But if you don't want to have them, don't criticize the choices of the people that do choose to have them cause you're not in their shoes.

On the cheating thing she is just taking a realistic approach. Lots of men do cheat. My guess is that theres probably 10 pct of decent guys out there who won't cheat given the opportunity. Thats a low number. So I think shes being pragmatic about her expectations and thats not a bad thing.

Camie goes for famous rock stars, actors, athletes, none of whom are known to be faithful. Camie is does have arrested development, she thinks she still has time...I think when she is no longer getting the leading lady roles she will end up doing what Geena did, marry a Dr or someone outside the industry & then have fertility treatements, but tell everyone "twins run in the family". She'll play the game in the press stating how she choose to take off time to be mom, when in reality she has nannies.

Yesh so much anger at this comment. I would agree that most men in the entertainment industry/with power cheat, I would assume that since all of her boyfriends have been public and entertainers that she is mostly referring to those people not all men in general. Also, when you have kiddos you are tied down and "stuck". She definitely could have worded that better, but when you have an infant, a toddler or an elementary aged child you can't just pick up and do whatever the fuck you want whenever the fuck you want. Some people were meant to have children and others were not. We don't live in an world where reproduction is a necessity to carry on the human race so I don't get the hate towards people who should not have children choosing to not have children. Do you really want more of these shitty parents we see on the news all the time?

I think she was just talking about life as a celebrity...it does seem as though they all cheat. Thats her world and she is relating her experiences in it.

I also didn't take her statement about being stuck with kids as a slam, but rather her saying that she wouldn't be able to jet off to some exotic locale take her mind off her troubles as easily if she had kids to consider.

This is no different than Obama saying he didn't want his girls to be punished with a baby. I don't think he meant all babies were punishment, and I don't think she meant that being a mother is a bad thing, just that it's not as easy to up and run off when you have little ones to consider.

Most dudes don't cheat (I'm one and I know a lot of others, and just one cheated and got ostracized by the rest of the group of friends we were, I don't care about him anymore). She is just extrapolating "hollyweird males" to "all males".

Regarding the kids thing, she is right. Is her way of life better that the one of the parents? I don't think so. Worse? Neither. Just different, and some people like vegetables and others love bacon, if you despise one of those groups, go to Westboro.

I thought being childless meant you didn't want kids. Period. Not that you hate them, or hate single parent statistics, but brcause you just do not want children. You aren't maternal/paternal and you don't want to be- that's ehat i thought childless meant. I didn't know it meant that children are the scum of the earth and that we all need to stop reproducing.

I think her focus on mobility is more a reflection of her boredom than an assertion of her freedom. She doesn't know what to do with her downtime and actors, even stars, are usually unemployed, more so as they age. Being a drunken party girl at 20 is fun, fun, fun. Being a drunken party girl at 40+ is sad, sad, sad.

I am childfree and wish to remain that way and I am such an idiot when it comes to what I imagine those with children live like. I'd say the same thing as her, not meaning to offend, but because from my perspective, they are tied down. I don't care about school or pediatricians or daycares or playgrounds when I want to move and that seems like freedom, does it not?

You sure assume alot from a few sentences strung together dont you. Divide the word assume and it leaves you ass-u-me....Not once was hate used in my commentary. Thats your assumption not mine. Also I was a joy as a child because I had 2 married parents who actually used discipline to raise me unlike most of these horrid children being raised now by people who shouldn't be parents.

I 'm gonna make this my last comment to you Kels because this exchange is escalating towards stupidity with each comment from you. Peace

I watched, I learned and I expect based on my observations. When a man is unhappy, he will look for comfort, either emotionally or physically, from a woman. Hopefully, that woman is his wife or significant.Most men don't leave without another woman already on the hook.Some men who Don't have a woman on the hook can become can become involved in dangerous behavior toward the wife or significant, when they are asked to go.Re Cammie? No matter where you go, there you are.

not everyone should have children and I don't throw shade at those who don't. But... when you are an old bastard in a nursing home because you have no one who gives two shits about you... the person taking care of you was SOMEONE's child... so be nice and respect the people who choose to provide the next generation.

You know people with kids who are mobile? Who are these masked parents??? She's entitled to her opinion and to decide what is right for her. Having kids so you won't be lonely in old age rarely works well. Kids deserve more than that. And you don't have to be wealthy to enjoy freedom and travel. Society regularly shames women who choose not to breed. They should save that shame for male breeders who don't care for their kids. I don't have kids, don't want them and have a fine life traveling the world for months at a time with great friends everywhere. Plenty of men I meet everywhere are cheating scum. It always surprises me. Still, the good men outnumber the bad. At least in my world.

It's all in your perspective I guess. I'm childless and may very well be that way til I die. I don't know. There are some children out there that I'm glad are not mine and I don't have to deal with. That doesn't mean I hate them nor do I dance around and sing about how wonderful life is. I don't view my friends who have children as doomed beings who flushed their lives down the drain, either. Yes, me being childless means I can come and go as I please but I don't feel as if my life is better or more meaningful or more fun simply because of that. Sometimes I do have envy for my friends who have marriage and children because that's something I've not experienced and may not get to. Cameron is certainly entitled to her opinion and good for her if she likes the mobile life. But her wording came off as snarky and bitter and like she was attempting to justify her choices in life. If she truly doesn't care, she probably wouldn't have commented in the way she did. Simply my opinion.

I'd like to see the child-free quote in context. I suspect much is being made of little. I don't see her as talking down at all. From her perspective, those friends are a little more stuck. It's not a value judgment; it's just not for her. Whatever.

I for one am quite tired of the pervading mainstream implication that because I don't have children and don't want them, that I'm missing out on being a 'real woman', and insinuating I'll die alone and uncared for. Fuck that.

Regular Joes cheat too. I get what she's saying, I just think it came out wrong. Why is she bitter again? Is Oprah bitter because of the same choices? At least she's not someone who thinks of children as a PR stunt. Looking at you Kum Kar'Trashian.

I had someone tell me once that he could never imagine getting a dog, because dogs tie you down. He had 3 kids at the time. Um, ok.

I have a dog, who is definitely a member of the family, who has never tied us down. We take her with us if we can, or she stays with my parents when we travel, or if it's a short trip, sometimes the kennel. I don't have kids, but I plan on it, and I don't see them tying us down either. They'll just come with us, or stay with the dog with my parents. (I won't put them in the kennel though) Most of my friends have kids, and all of them still travel, some of them on big overseas trips, with their kids. It's obviously different, and probably harder, but I'm sure it's worth it, IF that's what you want.

I'm happy for her that she decided not to have kids. I think if you don't want kids, you shouldn't have any. If that works for you, great. No judgement. If you want kids, great, have them (unless you're 16, or on drugs, or in some other way can't even take care of yourself). Why can't we all just do what works for ourselves without casting shade on all of those who make different choices?!

Speaking from the POV of a woman that has chosen to not bring a child into this world. I have often been judged for my decision. I have often felt the need to justify myself. I do not understand why some have felt it was their place to even question my personal choice. As if I somehow lack the maternal instinct. Which is very inaccurate. I have raised my stepson as my own. I adore my many nieces, nephews, and multiple godchildren. I have been married for 17 years and have never regretted my decision. Giving birth to a child does not make someone a mother. Nor is a child a possession. Love is love.

I've been told I haven't fulfilled my purpose in life as a woman by not having children. I've been told that I am going to die alone. I work holidays and crappy shifts that people with kids are never, never asked to do but it is assumed I will.

You know what, it's okay to think that sometimes not having kids is more fun than having them. It doesn't make me any more judgmental than the people who think it's better to HAVE kids. Why can't I say that I think I have it better? Is it assumed that having kids is better???

Oh - and by the way - if you've been in more relationship in your life - at some point, someone probably has cheated. Again, you don't make it to almost 40 without having someone act like a douchebag at least once. Though yes, she dates more than her fair share.

@ Ray It must be nice living in that delusional pink puffin fairytale land you call life. Lol :) Umm you do realize this is the internet right? I don't consider strangers on the internet as friends. I have real life friends that I see, love and hang out with often. I know, dearie, a poor puffin recluse like yourself never had no friends except on the interwebs. Lmao

Maybe Cam stated parents are "stuck" because that's what her friends have told her. "You're lucky you can pick up and go at any time. It's a production for us".

If we're "assuming" a lot of other things lets also assume that may be the forethought to her statement. I don't think she's throwing shade on her friends.

I too am childless and I didn't marry until I was in my 40's. It was a conscious decision and I have never once regretted making it.(Got sterilized at 28) I would not have been a great mom and I knew that. Some innocent souls were spared hopefully for better suited, more desirous parents.

I also think not just guys but everyone cheats IF IT'S IN THEIR NATURE. I'm still not sure if we're supposed to be monogamous. However, after sowing my wild oats and getting older I don't feel the need to stray. I also don't think my husband is the cheating type. I would be extremely surprised and a little hurt but I wouldn't leave him. I would hope we can talk about what drove him to stray and I'm sure I'd blame a lot of that on myself. So work would be done. That's what a marriage is anyway, work. (Or part-of course there's so much more!).

(The wow, Enty, cunt comment was a direct response from the first comment on here)

Sorry for the rant. But some of you people with children are really, really horrible.

I understand if you think she was snarky. I don't understand why you feel judged by her comments, but if you feel they came off as judgmental, so be it.

But THEN - all the real judgment comes out. The comments about how she's just sad and desperate. She's trying to justify here poor life choices. All this judgment that seems to reflect that she can't possibly be happy the way she is.

And all of the rude, judgmental commentary is totally justified because she was being judgy of your little world?

Not everyone gets to decide that they want kids, Enty. I wanted children desperately but never got to have them. As for being mobile? Cameron Diaz needs to see how I have to take care of my elderly mother. I'm the only child, so no siblings to help me, and I spent my twenties watching after my mom and being denied by my ashhole father (who loves his sons by his wife but refuses to acknowledge me) then I spent my thirties going to college instead of chasing down a baby daddy and now, having just turned forty, all my best years are behind me. I wasted my life going to college and being my moms caretaker. I would gladly cut off my writing arm to switch places with a whining tired babymama anyday.

The Internet where I'm at sucks like you wouldn't believe and will probably drop in a minute, but I wanted to say there are groups on the interwebs where childfree by choice people act like people who have children are giant losers who chained themselves to slobbering babies, and people who have children act like people who are childless (whether by choice or by reproductive circumstance) are giant losers who are missing out on the joys of the babies. Neither view is respectful of the other. I don't give a whit about Cammy but she's in her 40s and people are probably JenAnnistoning her all the time, so she said something. Dumping on her friends with kids? Maybe it seems that way to people who feel passionately about having kids, but I personally wouldn't care. Different choices, different lives.

I disagree Lioness70. You're imbuing a lot of feelings that no one really knows.

Remember folks, her comment was about being mobile NOT being childless.THAT follow up comment came from Enty. She's certainly able to adopt and no where has Cameron stated she didn't want kids or think they were horrible or anything.

Where's the rest of this interview? One line does not the entire article make. Does anyone know what was said before that?

Boy a lot of people are being judgy here today. Some of you are cut out to be parents and some just aren't and again those who choose to be childless get shade.

Miss Kitty...Try whatever means you can to become a parent. I think you'd be wonderful.(Sorry for being "judgy") Adoption doesn't have to just be a baby. They just need love and you appear to want to show that. I wish you much luck.

Over 40 no kids. Never interested, and bonus, very early menopause. Free as a bird. Love kids, and being the cool Aunty is very satisfying. I'm still shocked that I'm married.Cheating men? Lots do. Cameron doesn't have great taste in men....desperate, I doubt it.My rules re cheating: only in another city/town; don't bring it home; I don't wanna know. If I don't put out over x amount of time, I wld assume some straying. I don't have to worry much, my guy is loyal - he's a better person than me. I'm a flirt, it's a good thing I'm a cuntry girl now.

Why is anyone even listening to her shit? If you do what you've always done, you'll always get what you always fucking got. Sounds to me like self-fulfilling prophecy given her exquisite taste in men.

Anyone who takes life advice from an actress who said the following is a moron:"Pubic hair also serves as a pretty draping that makes it a little mysterious to the one who might be courting your sexiness. Pubes keep the goods private, which can entice a lover to come and take a closer look at what you have to offer...It’s a personal decision, but I’m just putting it out there: Consider leaving your vagina fully dressed, ladies. Twenty years from now, you will still want to be presenting it to someone special, and it would be nice to let him or her unwrap it like the gift that it is.” Yeah. A whole chapter of that and lots more about her "hungry vagina," apparently.

Saddest part is that someone decided to give her a platform to publish this kind of bullshit, and worse that people read it. Here is a short article outlining the FACTS about infidelity, even though a lot of research only looks at extra marital cheating (Cam isn't married)

Lady H..Enjoyed your comments on the research about internet "trolls" yesterday.

Here's my question though..If someone assumes another identity of sorts (and are we all completely honest all the time? NO)does that make them a troll? If they get pissy or disagree, people often call someone a troll but is that really a troll?I've just noticed we have regular commenters but as soon as they become embroiled in a disagreement they get labelled as such. Sorry for the OT.

She realizes kids grow up, right? That 20 years or so goes by FAST, and if you are lucky (they are/stay mentally and physically healthy) and good at your job, they become completely independent. Given that our lifespans are about 80 years these days, it's not that bad.

But if you don't want them, then by all means, refrain from having them. No shade here.

Thank @sherry. Exactly - the term troll is really broad. There are nice trolls, accidental trolls...they aren't all malicious. That's why it's important to categorize what we are talking about when we use the term. I guess you could use the term for people who are perceived to be posting for the purpose of creating conflict. In this way, the term can be seen today as more of a broader diss. I unfortunately see "troll" becoming misappropriated in a similar word as "gay," but that's a whole other debate. I think questions like these raise important concerns about the need to theorize about what types of trolls there are and how their behaviors are linked to ideas about how a site should be used. For example, if someone has an idea that CDAN should be exclusively used for gossip, they could say that I am trolling... Does that help at all?

Agree steam. I have have 2 kids, both married, and dont think any of them( inc inlaws) wld do and care for me the way i did with my parents. Thats okay, i just know i have to make my own plans for my eld. This way ill pick what and where i like.

Oh it's written gold. I'm happy to take her advice on how to style my cooch, but I'll defer to others when it comes to relationship advice. Infidelity isn't inevitable and something you should always expect unless you serially date philandering shitheads. I learned in high school that all you have to do is avoid dating assholes. Not that hard and it's worked quite well for me so far

I think its ridiculous that people get attacked for having opinions. Enty runs a gossip site that can be mean sometimes yet this idiot thinks actors should be PC and worried about offending a stranger? Seriously? That is so freaking moronic.

You know, she could have said "I don't want kids" or "I'll have kids when I'm with the right person". No need for that rambling soliloquy.

That said, I'm so goddamn tired of people trying to tell me what to do with my body and when. I'm tired of all the pearl-clutching moms who couldn't imagine a woman having a child after 30 and 40 is just pure suicide. I have this conversation at least twice a month with acquaintances and strangers alike. The reason I didn't have children is because I don't believe in having kids you can't take care of. When I was younger I went to school, partied, traveled, and built my career. I had relationships with men who weren't any more ready for a family than I was. I never wanted to be the person that goes on and on about all the things they wish they had done. So, if I get married and have kids, great. If not, great. I have no regrets.

@Lioness....Understand but I'm not so sure she wants to get married. She so far hasn't ever expressed an interest in doing so. She apparently likes her freedom. And that's okay too. And she understands who she's dating. She's never been clingy ad she'll tray for dick. Seems like she knows what she's getting into.

Cameron's interviews always make her seem so unpleasant and snippy. She must be really good at the casting couch because otherwise I don't see how she keeps getting cast.

I will correct it for her, being poor means people are stuck and can't be as mobile. Having money opens doors and allows people to go and vacation wherever they want. Does she really think her buddies Reese and Drew are "stuck" anywhere? Look at Brad and Angelina, they can go wherever they want, whenever, with all 6 of their kids.

I don't think everyone cheats, but if you are in many relationships in your life, starting from your teens to whenever you croak, I'd say, yes, you probably got cheated on or cheated a time or two. As for kids, meh. I have two grown ones, 7 grandkids. Love em all,but I'm sure not counting on them in old age. They live across the country from me now. I'm the lady who sends money and pays for beach trips.. Whatever.

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