BD

Hi

When is the best time to BD for conception. My gyno told me as soon as I finish AF every 2 days for 2 weeks. I asked her why and she said for the sperm to build up. We have been BDing around ovulation, probably onyl about 3 times (hence why not pregnant yet i presume)!

my gp told me exactly the same thing every 2nd day from the time af leaves until she is due again - we did that last month but didn't catch the eggie.

i don't think there is a particular right time personally, although i know alot of people chart their temps etc, there is a thread on charting that might help you.

i know when we conceived my last dd - i ovulated on a thursday and we didn't dtd until the following tuesday so i don't know what happened there.

we have been ttc our 4th child since august and have done all sorts of different times ie go for the one hit on ovulation day, every 2nd day around ovualation, every 2nd day from end af to start of af etc etc. we have now decided we are putting to much pressure on ourselves (me in particular as the clock is a ticking away for me as i am 37yrs old) so we have just gone back to dtd whenever we fancy and if we catch that eggie well that will just be fantastic.

When DW and I first TC'd, it took almost a year. Personally, I have known many couples who had been using the "pill" having to try for about a year. Not sure from a medical stand point, but I think there maybe a connection. At any rate allot of people I know have taken about a year. Our second child did not take that long, but did take probably 3 - 5 months. We employed a different method this last time .......Alcohol.....lol, J/K. We found an ovulation software program that we had been using to keep from getting pregnant (We were no longer using any form of BC other than an occasional condom). We had the software pretty well set up and it would tell us when not to or if we wanted when to BD. When we did decide to take a shot at another baby, we fell PG first time out but ended in M/C. The following month we went in search of the egg and are now due July 3. Not sure if anything I have typed has anything of value for you, but keep trying and I am sure things will work out. Good Luck!

mooshie - I see you were around 34/35 in age when you became PG with your last child. Was that PG rougher than your earlier PG's due to (in your opinion) your older age? What were some of the Differences that you noticed? Also, I see you are trying for 4th, can I assume you are not having issues with "how old you will be when they graduate, etc"?

DW is having a rough time off this PG mostly with being tired beyond what she remembers. Also although DW may not allow me near her eggs in the future....lol, I would like to keep open a 4th baby but am having a slight struggle (As is she) with our age and young children, etc. Would love to read your thoughts on the matter.

yes i was 35 yrs old whilst preg with lani and to tell you the honest truth i felt totally no different as to when i was 29yrs old and prg, put on the same amount of weight, same general discomforts etc. i must say tho that the morning sickness i had in the first tri was the hardest to deal with.

yes we are ttc currently our 4th child, a long time ago (i have known my dh for 20yrs omg and been married nearly 12yrs) we decided on having 3 children of either sex we didn't mind, i did want to have finished having children by the age of 30, however this was not to be - after being of the pill and trying half heartdly for 2yrs we fell prg but had miscarriage at 11wks, 8mths later we were successful and our first was born 3 mths before i turned 30, ds came along when i was 31 and to tell you the honest truth by dh said that we were very luck to have 2 healthy children and even luckier to have 1 of each sex why tempt fate etc. anyway we still built a new 4 bedroom house lol so i guess my dh was still toying with the idea of a 3rd (however he did joking mention the "v" word a few times) anyway our first dd was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumour in october 2001 and sadly left us in march 2002 - so we were left with our son, at that time i was 33 yrs old. my dh started saying lets have more children and initially i didn't want to (in fact i can honestly say if ds wasn't with us i would no longer be here) it was a rough trot anyway towards the end of 2002 i decided yes lets try for another child (i didn't really want my ds to grow up on his own after having a sister for 2yrs of his life) so we started ttc again - this took quite a while but honestly i think it was because it was so emotional for us so things weren't really working. anyway i was 35 when i had lani and straight away decided to go again - it took a little bit of convincing with dh but he has agreed (think he likes all the practicing lol) my cut off in my mind was 38 yrs old (which i will be in october) but i know in my heart we will keep trying.

my biggest concerns tho is what can go wrong and yes the age worries me but not in bringing them up - just in their general health, being involved with a few organisations (over the short course of my daughters illness) i have seen first hand some terribly sad situations.

i don't think it really matters what age you are if you know in yourself that it is right iykwim - you just don't know what life holds in store for you, so we try and make the most of everyday and if we do end up having another child that will be a gift that we will forever cherish.

oh and btw i am feeling the tiredness now but more so cause of my cheeky son lol.

mooshie - Thank you for the epic tale ( ). You did provide some info for me and I thank you for that. I can not imagine going through that kind of loss and then having to over come the associated feelings to try again. I am glad you and your DH were able to get through it and be blessed. I wish you guys success this time around as well.

It's interesting the goals that we walk into life's events with and then alter later. My DW wanted something like 6 kids when we got married. After our first child that number dropped to about 4 and after our second child she saw no reason to have anymore. She too wanted to be done by 30.....lol, and here we are. I remember growing up wanting a house, a wife and two kids one of each. That just seemed like what you were supposed to have. Now, DW is happy and I had to work pretty hard for this one and find the more I think about our children and all, the less I struggle with how old will my children be when I am in my 50's/60's...lol (still a little struggle though).

What has made this PG long in coming and yet possible is a lost surprised PG we had almost 2 years ago. The doctors had to remove our baby 3 months into the PG and that made it rough for DW to have another baby (emotionally) and yet also created a void that needed to be filled at some point.

Well once again, thank you for sharing your story, I appreciate it (I thought I would give you an epic story back for no real reason at all...lol)