Rectum Stretcher

While she was 'flying' down the road yesterday, a woman passed over a
bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in
wait.

The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, with that classic
patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, 'What's your hurry?'

To which she replied, 'I'm late for work.'

'Oh yeah,' said the cop, 'what do you do?'

I'm a rectum stretcher,' she responded.

The cop stammered, 'A what?............

A rectum stretcher?

And just what does a rectum stretcher do?'

'Well,' she said, 'I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up
to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I
work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly
but surely stretch it, until it's about 6 feet wide.'