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Today, I’ve had three inspirational quotes assault my eyeballs before I’ve had my breakfast. One of which was, “Live in the moment… but don’t be led by the moment, or the people who belong to it.”

Even if you wanted to follow that advice, it’s so vague and philosophical that you wouldn’t know where to begin.

So I’ve come up with some mundane, practical life advice that’s easy to follow and no one can dispute. Feel free to share on Facebook, turn into a wall plaque or tattoo on your neck:

Ball your socks

Last year, I went through a phase of just not balling my socks. It was utter chaos. Anarchy. A dark time in my life.

It got to the point that I didn’t care whether my socks matched. It hurts to look back and see how low I sunk.

Finally one day I thought, ENOUGH and I spent a good few hours pairing them back up again.

It was like an episode of Davina McCall’s Long Lost Family Reunion. Socks that hadn’t seen each other for a long time were finally reunited with one another. It was emotional to say the least.

I often ask myself what made me go down the road of not balling my socks. I came from a good family, who always balled their socks.

I’ll do everything in my power not to go back to that place.

Never buy bedcovers with sequins

As a person who values comfort above everything, I must have taken leave of my senses when I purchased not only a bed set with sequins, but the matching cushions too.

Why did I think sleeping on these scratchy little suckers would be a good idea? As well as having the face ripped off me, to this day I still have recurrent nightmares that I’m being attacked by an angry cat. They’re in the charity shop now. To be honest I’m surprised they accepted them.

Wash bowls of cereal straight away

If you don’t want to spend a good portion of your life chiselling off cornflakes that are barnacled on to your bowls then for the love of God, just wash them immediately.

Keep on top of charging things

I know, I know, you like to live on the edge, as do I. Nothing quite gets the old adrenalin going like having two per cent in your phone but you’re playing with fire and you know it. As boring as it is to plug it in at, say, 40 per cent, you know it’s the right thing to do. Don’t be that person in a cafe asking the staff if you can use their charger.

Don’t make small talk at the beginning of a flight

If you ever fly alone, fight all of your instincts to speak to the person sitting beside you. Don’t even make eye contact.

Get your earphones in and your face in a book pronto. Trust me, I’ve been in enough banal four-hour conversations with strangers to speak with authority on this matter.

Question -1 of 5Score -0 of 0

Which singer had their legs clawed at while performing at a concert and almost got yanked off stage?