"History will never again offer humankind a riper opportunity to commit vulgarity on an astronomical scale," said Troy Patterson in Slate. Yet, against all odds, "the broadcast of the Staples Center memorial service for Michael Jackson erred on the side of dignity and taste." Yes, the pallbearers wore sequined gloves, "but an incomparable showbiz career deserves a commensurately big finish. Anything less would have been inappropriate."

Please! Michael Jackson's "dog-and-pony show" of a memorial service was "as dignified as a Vegas lounge-lizard act combined with the entertainment value of a carnival freak show," said Andrea Peyser in the New York Post. The service merely added to the media circus surrounding his death. "From the accolades, prayers, and cries of grief, you'd think you were witnessing the death of a saint, not an accused serial pedophile who hated the skin in which he lived."