"Shooting Star"

"The Ballad of Barney Fitswaller"

The Lyrics

According to legend, Barney Fitzswaller of Lansing, Michigan is the only known human to have rock and rolled all night and partied every day. Newspaper reports suggest he started slowly with Barry Manilow LPs and by the dawn, he was knee deep in Hüsker Dü and Melting Pigeons for Pyromaniacs. After his 3,433rd day of rocking, he tragically died in a freak accident involving Mezcal, a burlap sack, and a runaway American dream. Relatives said he was normally a quiet man who kept to himself.(Kudos to ML for suggesting the following parody)

Barney, unemployed boyAnd he lived with his Dad and MomManilow, I think he heard,And the strains of “Mandy,” full and strongGot himself some LPsBarney bought every typeMade his life a runaway rocketAnd pouring through Cream at nightAnd he smoked…

And he heard Harrison on smooth sitarAnd the PoguesDepeche ModeAnd he heard that guitar from Johnny MarrAnd all the rum he ran through till the dawnThe dawn made him crawl

Barney drank a pitcherJack straight in a plastic jugSeventies sung from his lungsFrom Zep, to Kinks, to PunkCrankin’ the amps up highSmoke risin’ from tray of ashBarney liked to party and say“Guess I made the years go by fastAnd the dough,Need some mo’.”

And he drank and he sang in Gremlin carMovin’ slowThen he closed the downtown and music barsAnd days would drink, then bum tunes from friends fewAnd dance to New York Dolls

Barney’s light burned brightDied near a kegBottle of MezcalBurlap mattress for his bedBarney’s groove made life flyLivin’ fast, dyin’ youngSee him drummin’ to the BossCan you hear Born to Run?

Barney throws down the jams with shooting starsSee ‘em glowBarney sings in the bars of planets farWhat a showWhat a show

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