Nikol Hasler: Cool with Porn

I was about to go to bed, but was feeling kind of low because I'd rather have been going to bed with this new guy I've been seeing. I've resolved to take things slowly when I start new dating relationships and I'd just spent the weekend with him, so it was time for a night alone ... seemed like a good time to watch a chick flick and paint my gnarly toe-nails. Maybe powder my vagina or whatever chicks do in this situation.

So I was daftly trying to push a tear-jerking Netflix disc into my computer's DVD when I realized there was still a disc in my computer. I ejected it and my poor li'l heart broke as Simon Wolf's Amateur Hour came out into my hand.

Just last week the guy I've been seeing and I had made our way to the sex shop and mutually picked out a movie. It was such a fun process. Once we got back to his place it was really difficult not to run to his bedroom and put the flick into my laptop. Still, we waited a bit and the anticipation made it even more fun.

After our evening, I began to reflect on my relationship with porn. That's where the topic of this week's video came from. I can't do too much about how I've reacted to porn in the past. It was part of how I viewed sex, and how I viewed myself. What I can do with it, and what I learned from it, is try to share and shed some light.

I hear from a lot of women who think pornography is degrading and disgusting, but those same women claim to enjoy sex and sexuality. I wonder where it all comes from. I am not one to make ignorant blanket statements, but what I can do is figure out what I was so worked up about and face it. Not everyone will like porn, and that's fine. It's not mandatory. But it is okay if you do like it, and it is mandatory that, should someone else like it, you don't treat them like puppy kickers because of it.

What about you? Do you like porn? Honestly? Or do you hate it? Or does it just do nothing for you? I'm curious to know what you learned, too.

Comments

I was the same way for years about my partner's porn usage until i realized that i enjoyed some types of porn as well. Did that mean that i chose to be with these people over my man? Absolutely not. I came to realize that i was being irrational and may have actually closed up potential dialogues about our fantasies as a couple. Some studies actually suggest that many women do get aroused from watching porn. Pornography viewed alone or with your partner can open up conversations about what positions you might like to try, new places to have sex or may help a couple get in the mood. I never thought i would say this but pornography can actually help your sex life if you are comfortable with it and open with your partner. Love the closing, "love your ta tas"

Hm I have never had any feelings towards porn that are negative. I dont like a whole lot of it myself because I find it hard to find anything that feels believable enough. If the porn star looks at the camers, has an annoying moan, just even looks like they may be faking it, all it does is turn me off. Ive never minded my man watching it because this is how i see things... Id rather him watching the kind of porn he likes on the computer or tv instead of going out and trying to expirement with woman at a bar. so more power to him, fill the house with porn! Porn is also a good thing for experimenting, seeing which each partner might like to try, and i like to try new things But really for me erotic novels (not the fabio type ones) are what gets me hot and bothered. Then I get to visualize anyone I want in my head, and In my head I am pretty much always the main character,

Sexually active at a young age, Nikol Hasler didn't have consistent or healthy role models in her young life. Pregnant and homeless by the age of 18, she eventually settled down in Wisconsin. She worked a variety of jobs- from short order cook, to fast food manager, to third shift front desk at a Super 8. In 2008, she reconnected with a high school friend and together they formed The Midwest Teen Sex Show, a very popular comedy podcast for teenagers about sex. The show was done just for fun but quickly gained national media attention. With the show, Hasler was able to use her own experiences and sense of humor to provide straight forward, direct information to teens about sex.
Since then, Hasler has written a book on the subject and moved to Los Angeles where she was hired to create a pilot of MTSS for Comedy Central. She stayed in LA, finally feeling at home, and she currently works as a producer for the non-profit One Economy Corporation. Nikol also currently writes for SexIs magazine on her column “So What Did We Learn?” where she covers topics like nipple hair, porn, and emotional safety. Once described as "More genuinely herself than most people can allow themselves to be", Hasler's style of complete disclosure and frankness make her stand out.
How did Nikol's early life experiences influence how she currently teaches? What advice does Nikol have for someone interested in becoming a sex educator? How does Nikol's innovative style of Sex Ed draw in teenagers' attention? Please join us as in welcoming Nikol Hasler to the Community Interview!