She is gone from my life forever, and I am killing myself for myself the only doubt is if I should say something.
But I have not been able to say the right thing, whatever that may be, for so long now.

the way you feel right now will passs..we all go through it in life and all somehow manage to come through it, all you need to do is keep fighting for what is right and true... if you believe that she is your true love then tell her exactly how you feel right now, then keep fighting to stay with us... whatever the outcome suicide is NOT the answer!