09 November 2010

It has been about three weeks since I wrote anything on this blog. I'm not sure why to be honest. I've been listening to so much good music there really isn't an excuse. Although I'm still a devout believer in iTunes, my enthusiasm is waning. In weeks past, particularly with the legal elimination of Limewire, I've been searching for a reliable yet cheap method of acquiring mp3's. And then out of the corner of my eye I spotted Amazon.com, a friend that had always casually been there but suddenly our relationship was becoming something more...

I'm having a love affair with Amazon and their brilliant Digital Download department. I'm so angry at myself for not realizing it before. They have an unbelievable, almost guilt-inducing amount of free downloads (that are actually really good!). Like any passionate affair, I'm not sure of its origin. I think it was innocent at first - I noticed that Of Montreal's "Sex Karma" single featuring Solange was a "free download of the day". Since I'm the king of sexy music and I love both artists, I figured I'd use it as a sample download to see if Amazon was even compatible with my aging laptop. Surprisingly all Amazon required from me was to install a very small program on to my computer in order to automatically transfer any of my purchases on to iTunes and bam: I was the proud owner of free, legal music.

All at once I realized something in my heart was changing. I would wait with baited breath until I could get home each night and search for more free/cheap music on Amazon. As my laptop lay on my chest and caressed the skin of my fingertips with every new song I bought, I knew this was something good. It just kept going - the recommendations I was getting for FREE songs that I actually wanted to own were blowing my mind. An entire album of 2010 Merge Record hits? Yes. A new Badly Drawn Boy single? Don't mind if I do. Chaka Khan singing James Bond theme songs? Yes, yes, yes! Even my recommendations matched my quirky personality. It was a match made in heaven.

So we're up to date. As I sit here listening to a live track from Lambchop (the band, not the lovable puppet) that was free and completely unexpected, I feel content in my musical accomplishments - although I have not been sharing them. You know how it is with a new relationship, you want to keep all the love to yourself. But now I'm ready to talk about it. Amazon and I are together. I'm sorry iTunes, you tax all your overpriced songs. I wanted to buy Cee Lo's new record from you today but you insisted on $1.29 a song when Amazon was asking a flat fee of 0.99. What am I supposed to do? You would do the same thing.

It might seem a little silly to compare music sites to lovers but you know I'm starting to think they're not too far off. The feeling I get from a sensual song is somewhat similar to the sensual feeling in real life. Because I was in the loving spirit I bought a lot of songs from Amazon today in addition to my free downloads, one of which was "Private Eyes" by the incomparable Hall and Oates. I know it's embarrassing that I didn't own it before (although I have on vinyl for many years) but it always seemed less important than other H&O songs. Now I just want to complete my collections of every artist I love. ANYWAY, it is such a sexy song - and "Do What You Want, Be What You Are", also by Hall and Oates. I wouldn't even know this song existed if it weren't for Amazon. I've amassed 56 songs in the past week because of these people. I'm pretty excited for our future together.

If we're being honest though, my emotions have been shifting back and forth frequently over the past three weeks I have been absent from this blog. There have been so many incredible highs but mentally several lows that I'm not sure how to explain. Music is a great reliever of pain and tension but sometimes it accelerates it. When you're in compromising positions mentally certain lyrics set you off just so and you can't listen to them. Lately I've been unable to relate to most songs because I'm not sad or angry or anything very strongly (except romantically charged). I mean Usher's "Trading Places" and N.E.R.D.'s new single "Hypnotize You" are definitely working with that theme but I'm in a deeper state than that somehow. It's not worth explaining as I don't even need an explanation. Actually, I'm also in a recent quest to find songs that are completely unrelated to relationships/love. The National are always good for this as very often their themes are a bit larger than mere love, it's much more nationally (no pun intended) and economically charged with a lot of lyrics trying to decipher the woes of growing older and getting up just to work and "live". I'd like to find other bands like this. It's tough because even the greatest songwriters turn to love more than absolutely anything else. Sometimes I'm just not in the mood to hear about it though.

16 October 2010

I don't know why I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I genuinely like Rihanna. During her "Pon De Replay" days or whatever she wasn't my thing but lately with the prior release of her "Rated R" album and the recent songs on the radio from her upcoming album, I'm really appreciating her sound. And not just that, I like her strong, nearly masculine message of taking charge and questioning the prowess of her admirers. There's something kinky and exciting about her image and overall aura.

In her latest video for "Only Girl (in the World)", she takes a step back from the overtly graphic lyrics and moves into subtlety risque territory - the entire video is just her wearing midriff baring tops with neon colored balloons floating in a meadow. It's still risky but kind of beautiful and really interesting to watch. The images almost work against the music which adds a nice contrast. This is really just a dance song with some so-so lyrics but like Lady Gaga, when you add these massively colorful, memorable scenes to it, there's this new layer that makes the song that much better.

I had a friend who used to insist that music videos were pointless because music must be heard not seen. We would harass him, saying that everyone should just close their eyes at concerts then because what would the point of looking at the musicians be? You should just let the music flow through your ears. Of course, I understand his logic a little but it's music videos like these, that have that extra edge of surprise that make the art form very worthwhile. When I used to watch MTV Hits, the 24 hour music video channel, obsessively, I would always love when Rihanna's "Rude Boy" video came on. It was during the Chris Brown controversy and possibly for that reason or something unbeknownst to my own mind, I always felt like this was a rather melancholy song. There's this air of sadness or creepiness about it although it's truly sexy and different (maybe a little M.I.A. "Paper Planes" but in my opinion, even better). I think of Rihanna more as a performance artist than musician. Perhaps my friend is right and music videos aren't necessary for songs like "Wonderful Tonight" or "Rave On" because classic, GOOD songs stand alone but carefree, fun dance songs need the visuals to back themselves up and become greater than the sum of their parts.

Take a Ciara music video for instance. Her songs bore me to tears but whenever she's on the screen I can't stop watching. The way she moves is hypnotic and in turn I start feeling the song more. I'm not saying it's right to use cheap tricks like that to sell music but it just happens. If I'm enjoying a song on a soundtrack to a movie that I never realized I liked before in real life, chances are I'll appreciate it a lot more from now on - in part because of the context I now think of it in. Rihanna's songs have always been like that for me too. I like her so in turn I like her music. To me, she's charismatic, beautiful, and fascinating. Of course I've never taken the leap and actually listened to any of her songs outside of the singles because I'm not sure it's my style but nevertheless I value her work as something that's more than just cheesy dance music. She reminds me of Tina Turner.

15 October 2010

I feel like I've been all John Mayer-ed out for years now but there's something about his songs that always makes me come back. I'll be thinking situations out in my head and randomly think of his lyrics without meaning to - a classic sign of a great songwriter. It's not necessarily that the words are so brilliant, it's rather the very raw, natural emotions in his simple lyrics that make them so relatable. Some of these lines are just phrases someone might say within a normal conversation. He nails the feeling because he doesn't mask it in metaphors, it's all out in the open.

This song particularly is one of my favorites from Battle Studies. It might sound a little silly but the power it has live is pretty amazing.

(Studio)

Edge of Desire lyrics by John Mayer

Young and full of running
Tell me where has that taken me?
Just a great figure eight or a tiny infinity?

Love is really nothing
But a dream that keeps waking me,
For all of my trying
We still end up dying, how can it be?

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me,
'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see,
I want you so bad, I'll go back on the things I believed,
There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me.

So young and full of running, all the way to the edge of desire
Steady my breathing, silently screaming,
"I have to have you now"
Wired and I'm tired
Think I'll sleep in my clothes on the floor
Maybe this mattress will spin on its axis and find me on yours

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me
'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see
I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me

Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me
'Cause I'm just about to set fire to everything I see
I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe
There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me

04 October 2010

My dear friend saw The National live last night at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville, TN and while she said the entire show was incredible, she singled out an unplugged version of "Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks" as one of the best parts. Seeing the entire crowd softly singing along really affected her - "not even a microphone!" she text me.

Well I didn't understand it until I saw this video. Have you ever seen a band do something like this before? This song is already an emotional segment of the show at a regular concert but to see it done like this is overwhelming. Seeing the entire crowd singing back up is unbelievable. The lyrics to this song are particularly poignant and it's strange how the diversity of the crowd doesn't change the fact that we all have these thoughts. There is a genuine feeling that lives inside this song that just resonates with people - any one of these audience members could've written these lyrics because they are truly that universal. Like I said in the last post, many of The National's songs can easily become anthems for people in their own lives. The repetition of certain lyrics bring out the truth in them somehow. It's also strange to hear the last line, "I'll explain everything to the geeks", without Matt Berninger's classic shouting. It all works though.

This is so impressive and a perfect depiction of how interactive and perceptive The National are as a band.

Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks Lyrics by The National

Leave your homeChange your nameLive aloneEat your cake
Vanderlyle, crybaby, cryOh the waters are risin'Still no surprisin' youVanderlyle, crybaby, cryMan its all been forgivin'Swans are a swimmin'I'll explain everything to the geeks

All the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for love

Vanderlyle, crybaby, cryOh the waters are risin'Still no surprisin' youVanderlyle, crybaby, cryMan its all been forgivin'Swans are a swimmin'I'll explain everything to the geeks

Hangin' from chandeliers Same small worldAt your heels

All the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for loveAll the very best of us String ourselves up for love

Vanderlyle, crybaby, cryOh the waters are risin'Still no surprisin' youVanderlyle, crybaby, cryMan its all been forgivin'Swans are a swimmin'

I'll explain everything to the geeksI'll explain everything to the geeks

02 October 2010

I don't know how many times I can say it: Matt Berninger is the greatest frontman in contemporary rock music.

After seeing The National six times this year I almost go to their shows hoping I won't like something so I'll have a shot at writing a different review. Of course, all I'm left with after the fact is a brilliant show that doesn't need my words slobbering all over it. There are only so many times I can start these reviews with "I can't express how much I love The National..." or "The National are the greatest band on earth..." Some people might get the impression I'm a little obsessed. I am.

Before I get into my usual gushing, I have to say that I've been to two concerts since I saw The National perform and although both were great in their own ways, I couldn't muster the excitement I thought was necessary to appreciate either fully. The National has ruined me for any other band. I go to a show knowing that the singer is not going to completely encompass the lyrics of the songs and I know they're not going to come into the audience and sing into people's faces half inebriated and half embarrassed. Maybe it's strange that I love Matt Berninger more than anyone in the world or maybe it's just that he is incapable of disappointing me - and everyone else in the audience.

And it's not just Berninger. Aaron and Bryce Dessner, Scott and Bryan Devendorf, and the occassional Padma Newsome make this band the greatest around. Their artistry and musicianship is unmatched by any I've seen.

Friday at the Wellmont was no exception. I've never been a fan of this venue but The National made it sound better than ever. Berninger came out drunker than usual with the requisite wine bottle and immediately went into "Runaway" which had been more of a closing number in their summer tour. While 50% of the show was dedicated to songs off High Violet, the other half managed to have a couple surprises, mostly in the form of "Daugthers of the Soho Riots" and "Available" which are songs I've seen this year but not recently.

It's always extraordinary to see a song start off calm and collected and end in a beautiful shambles. Songs like "Afraid of Everyone" and "England" begin in nearly a whisper with simple lyrics that set the scene and by song's end the anthemic lines begin in repetition with Berninger screaming at the top of his lungs and falling into microphone stands, Aaron and Bryce closing their eyes intently playing guitar all the while. There is no other band that could pull off a line like "Your voice is swallowing my soul" nearly ten times in one song and practically bring the crowd to tears. I clutch my heart every time I hear it.

After an exquisite performance of "Fake Empire" to close the set, the encore started with "Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks", a song I had a difficult time appreciating since the new album came out. I think the title is corny and since it's near the end of the record, I just dismissed it more than I should have. Hearing it live gives it an entirely new life. The beginning lines "Leave your home, Change your name. Live alone, eat your cake" are basically just Berninger a cappela and it kills me every time. Hearing his deep voice trying to hit the high notes and faltering just enough to sound authentically painful is incredible. He makes himself so vulnerable on stage that I can't imagine the entire audience not falling in love with him by the end. He feels the lyrics with every fiber of his being - or at least makes it appear that way. His charisma is otherworldly.

In true National fashion, the show ended with Matt climbing on speakers and falling into the audience with his trademark, larger than life microphone cord trailing behind him. It's impossible to explain how it feels to watch him perform unless you're there to experience it. There are a lot of great musicians out there but it takes something a long the lines of magic to be the best.

Today I woke up at 7am. It's a disgusting practice and I pray every time it happens that it will never occur again. I'm the worst morning person in the world. I look, sound, and act like Walter Matthau before 12pm and it's not pretty on me. The one thing that makes any morning better is my iPod.

A few days ago after one too many homemade margaritas, I decided to go on Limewire and illegally download "feel good" songs. In my head these would be hip, cool songs that I could listen to when I'm home having a couple drinks, partying with my cat. Needless to say things turned ugly fast and good taste (Pavement, The Kinks) turned bad (Jennifer Lopez, The Pussycat Dolls).

I don't know what it is in my brain that likes absurd music that I know is created by machines and auto-tune but I can't help myself. I'm overly empathetic towards a lot in my life and music is no exception. After watching Jennifer Lopez's Behind the Music where she chronicles her first traumatic recording sessions, I liked her music even more - despite the fact that she was openly admitting to having a bad voice. When Usher sings about infidelity and gets on his knees to hug faceless women's legs in music videos, I chalk it up to unique artistry, certainly not scumbag-level arrogance. When Snoop Dogg is featured in every video with girls dancing around in skimpy clothes (i.e. Katy Perry's "California Girls", Pussycat Dolls "Buttons"), I figure it's because he needs to make extra dough to support his adorable family I grew to love on "Snoop Dogg's Fatherhood", the spectacular E! Entertainment Nework reality show.

It all comes back to this morning. As I was standing outside in the pouring rain I decided to put my headphones on and listen to Ms. Lopez's classic song "All I Have" with LL Cool J. I won't deny my history with this song - I love music videos. When I was younger they were all I watched. This particular video was on all the time. As a youthful teenager I thought Jennifer Lopez was utterly beautiful: she wore Jimmy Choo boots, furry coats, had those curves.. so much to look at. Indirectly, I'm sorry to say, this video, and others like it, are probably in my subconscious for the rest of my life. Luckily I think I understand the ironic humor within the lyrics and don't plan on dating any guys that tell me they're "cats that creep all over town" (you know I'd prefer to play that role). I never realized until today in the rain how insanely sexist the lyrics are or how good this song is. I don't think it's really trying to teach anyone a lesson and of course which of these artists is truly synonymous with power? The answer is obvious so there's no reason to feel too bad for the plight of females within this context. Although it's important to point out that it's dangerous to listen to songs like this when you're young. I do believe that personal relationship insecurities can be stirred by false images in pop songs. If I have children I won't let them listen to Neil Sedaka until they're at least 17.

The thing that bothered me most is my relationship with songs like this. I always thought I had a healthy relationship with music, so much that I could openly relay any of my interests to anyone who wanted to know. Standing there in the rain, with my black glasses, skinny jeans, and wannabe Rastafarian, maroon hat, I quietly listened to Jennifer Lopez... any time someone would walk by I lowered the volume as if I thought they cared or would even hear it over the raindrops falling on cement. I was embarrassed. I should be listening to something different, not Jock Jams from 2002 or something. Who do I think I am? It brought back memories of sixth grade when my friend Danielle told me I had no right to appreciate Selena's music.

"But I really love her."

"Why because you saw the movie?"

"Yes but I swear I have at least one of her cd's in my room."

"Please. You don't understand her."

I don't know why I always remember that. Danielle was actually one of my best friends at the time so I know she wasn't deliberately hating on my musical preferences but she felt a particular kinship to Selena that apparently I wasn't allowed to feel. I can't even express to you how much I really did love that crazy movie. I've always been a total sucker for all things Jennifer Lopez. I'll watch that movie with her and Matthew McConaughey about the wedding stuff anytime it's on and I usually hate movies like that. She has some crazy charisma that I'm drawn to - or as a drugged up male friend of mine once said, I'm just drawn to the "exotic ladies".

And it really doesn't end there. I go from 12 year old in 2002 to 45 year old in the '80's. "King of Wishful Thinking"? "Danny's Song"? Kenny Loggins? TOTO?! What am I doing?

Does anyone remember Joe? The song "Stutter" has always been a personal favorite. I relate a little too much to the lyrics these days but when I was a kid I just thought he was a pretty good looking cat with a great voice.

I'm also in love with Pharrell but I'm not too embarrassed by that.

I think that's all I'm ready to admit.

I actually believe Nicole Scherzinger is an excellent role model for young girls. I'm always an advocate for women taking control of their own sexuality and not leaving it up for the debate of the opposite gender.

20 September 2010

All week I'll be posting about The National in one respect or another leading up to the concert on Friday. This particular video is a couple years old but I never get tired of it. I have an addiction and I love it. In this moment, there's nothing I love more in fact.

19 September 2010

I don't know why the tides have shifted in the past few days but something happenend and I can't get my groove back. I have at least two new wrinkles on my face and in honor of my rapid aging process in my early/mid-twenties, I'd like to share a little list of some songs. Sometimes I feel like the apocalypse isn't too far and sometimes this music helps.

I'm almost on the cusp of wanting to meet real people again and get out of my headphones for a few hours a day. I wonder what that will be like, actually wanting to answer the phone for people other than the few I do now. Imagine if I met someone like Cory Booker that was actually real and incredibly intelligent and perceptive. Someone genuine who wasn't afraid. Maybe that will happen at some point but all that is certain for now is the aging process.

"All of this around us will fall."

Here are 16 songs, along with some choice lyrics, about growing old.

Aerosmith - Dream On
The definitive song I think of when I see my reflection, unfortunately:

Every time that I look in the mirrorAll these lines on my face getting clearer The past is gone It went by, like dusk to dawn Isn't that the way Everybody's got their dues in life to pay Yeah, I know nobody knows Where it comes and where it goes I know it's everybody's sin You got to lose to know how to win

Mary J. Blige - Work in ProgressSometimes I get down, sometimes I want to cry, Sometimes I get depressed,No one promised there would be sunshine all the time.

John Mayer - Stop This TrainNo I'm not color blindI know the world is black and whiteTry to keep an open mind but...I just can't sleep on this tonightStop this train I want to get off and go home againI can't take the speed it's moving inI know I can'tBut honestly won't someone stop this train

Third Eye Blind - Wake For Young SoulsWell the wind that blows its blowing colder and the child that grows she's growing olderAnd the friends we know they'll turn a shoulderThe friends we know they are growing colder

Rod Stewart - You Wear it WellAnyway my coffee's cold and I'm getting told
That I gotta get back to work
So when the sun goes low and you're home all alone
Think of me and try not to laugh and I wear it well.

Badly Drawn Boy - The Time of TimesOh, sweet morning
And your head's not right
Did you hear my warning
This is the time of times
And your head feels like your body
Your mind is close behind
There's a teardrop on your shoulder
Says this is the time of times
It's the time of times again

Jackson Browne - These DaysAnd I had a lover
It's so hard to risk another these days
Now if I seem to be afraid
To live the life I have made in song
Well it's just that I've been losing so long
I'll keep on moving
Things are bound to be improving these days
These days I sit on corner stones
And count the time in quarter tones to ten, my friend
Don't confront me with my failures
I had not forgotten them

The Killers - When You Were YoungAnd sometimes you close your eyes and see the place where you used to live
When you were young
They say the devil's water, it ain't so sweet
You don't have to drink right now
But you can dip your feet
Every once in a little while

The Strokes - SomedayIn many ways they'll miss the good old days
Someday, someday
Yeah it hurts to say but I want you to stay
Sometimes, sometimes
When we was young oh man did we have fun
Always, always
Promises they break before they're made
Sometimes, sometimes

Death Cab For Cutie - No SunlightWith every year
That came to pass
More clouds appeared
'Til the sky went black, and there was
No sunlight
And it disappeared at the same speed
As the idealistic things I believed
The optimist died inside of me

Silversun Pickups - Growing Old is Getting OldSuddenly
We decompose
But we're not alone
So we all
Are growing old

and my favorite line:I memorized your smile lines from left to right.

Tracy Chapman - I Did it AllWhen they come to interview me
For my made for TV movie
Say I'm the bitch who was a bastard
Who did it all for the love and laughter
I did it all

Jay Z - 30 SomethingI'm from the era where ni**as don't snitch
you from the era where snitchin' is the shit
I'm afraid of the future, why?
Y'all respect the one who got shot
I respect the shooter
Y'all go to parties to ice grill
I go to parties to party with nice girls

George Harrison - All Things Must PassNow the darkness only stays the night-time
In the morning it will fade away
Daylight is good at arriving at the right time
It's not always going to be this grey
All things must pass

LCD Soundsystem - Losing My EdgeI used to work in the record store.
I had everything before anyone.
I was there in the Paradise Garage DJ booth with Larry Levan.
I was there in Jamaica during the great sound clashes.
I woke up naked on the beach in Ibiza in 1988.
But I'm losing my edge to better-looking people with better ideas and more talent.
And they're actually really, really nice.

18 September 2010

Not only is autumn my favorite season, it also seems to be the time I find some of the best music - whether new or old. Every time I put together one of these lists I feel like I'm giving away treasure. I don't often share music one on one so the songs become really personal to me. I have reasons for loving every one of these songs but really their defining characteristic to make this list is fall appeal. I can easily envision someone in a tweed coat and hat enjoying a crisp leaf shower while playing any one of these songs. Autumn is a time of breezy coziness and the music has to match. I hope you enjoy.

01 Band of Horses– Blue Beard
I'm completely crazy about Band of Horses. If The National weren't so incredible, they would probably be my favorite band. This song particularly has a dark, Beach Boys vibe that I continuously come back to.

02 Blood Feathers– Don't Know You At All
I found this band last week and already I'm smitten. It's probably the most important song on the list to try out. If you like The Felice Brothers, Johnny Cash, or Buddy Holly, you will love them.

03 Sam Bisbee– Molecules
This song is ridiculous, full of talk-rap, incredible beats and real, authentic musicianship of the strangest kind - like the way Owl City would be if they were cool.

04 Sic Alps– L Mansion
Another recent discovery but one I'm so excited about. Sic Alps has a throwback appeal in a Kinks sort of way and I have iTunes to thank for finding them.

05 Wolf People– October Fires
Wolf People are an English psychedelic rock band that is fairly new but extremely interesting. Their sound sounds at once familiar and very different. October Fires is my favorite track so far.

06 Gayngs – Crystal Rope
I had been hearing about Gayngs, a rap/indie rock supergroup featuring Justin Vernon of Bon Iver, for a long time now and finally got around to checking it out a few days ago. I instantly fell in love with this song although I don't think the entire album lives up to its "mood music" reviews.

07 Ray LaMontagne– Shelter
The most beautiful song of the past several years.

08 Drake – Fancy
After his performance on the VMA's this year, I couldn't get this song out of my head. Although it's the least autumny of the bunch, it's a great song to dance around to with your pet.

09 The Ramones– I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend
I had been listening to the Pete Yorn cover of this song for so long that I forgot what this version sounded like. I'm not typically into punk rock but this transcends the genre and what better time to celebrate a new romance than autumn?

10 Ambrosia– Biggest Part of Me
One of the bigger hits on the list, this song is so reliable yet I don't think it gets proper credit. Ambrosia is certainly not a well-discussed classic rock band in the same way as Boston or Journey but their songs are equally as classic. One line of this song and you'd know it instantly.

11 Foreigner – Waiting for a Girl Like You
This song has that eerie, sad/happy feeling that I always crave. It's equal parts nice ("I've been waiting for a girl like you to come into my life") and troubling ("Maybe I'm wrong, won't you tell me if I'm coming on too strong, this heart of mine has been hurt before").

12 Sting– I’m So Happy I Can’t Stop Crying
This is probably my current favorite on the list. Instead of the usual lite-rock sound, Sting comes in with a country twang that rivals Ryan Adams and discusses how he's "so happy" about his significant other leaving him. I always appreciate a good double meaning.

13 Ryan Adams – Somehow, Someday
Off Adam's 2001 album "Gold", Somehow, Someday is one of the best tracks. It's classic Ryan Adams but also one of those songs that evokes its own mood instantly.

14 Wheat – Half of the Time
Although they're still primarily unknown, Wheat has been making music for over a decade and were featured on the soundtrack to Cameron Crowe's film "Elizabethtown". This is a newer song off their 2009 album "White Ink, Black Ink" that perfectly portrays their sound. I'm in love with it.

15 Naked Eyes – Promises, Promises
This just reminds me so much of Hall and Oates that I'm drawn to it. Naked Eyes is probably best known for "Always Something There to Remind Me" (which is fantastic) but this is equally as good vintage synth-poppy music.

16 Rihanna – Only Girl
This is her latest single and basically it's really fun. Also I won't deny that I can relate to the lyrics.

17 Fitz & the Tantrums– Moneygrabber
One of my favorite bands. Their debut album "Pickin' Up the Pieces" just came out last month and this is the track I've been playing over and over again.

18 Pete Yorn– Velcro Shoes
Although his new album has yet to be released, Pete Yorn has been giving away individual tracks for free on various websites for the past several months. Velcro Shoes, a fast-paced rock song that strays slightly from Yorn's usual formula, is my favorite of these tracks so far. Full album available September 28th.

19 The National– The Geese of Beverly Road
What can I say? It reminds me of Halloween and makes me feel a longing for something indescribable. Perfect for fall.

20 Duck Sauce- Anyway
I take it all back, this is my favorite song on the list. Watch!

You didn't think I wouldn't talk about The National this week did you? It's been too long. I do have to say that I shouldn't even be writing right now with my thoughts so jumbled but the greatest thought of all is seeing The National six days from now. It's slightly bittersweet because there aren't any more National concerts lined up for the rest of the year after this (!!!) but that's why I'm going to milk this for all it's worth. For the next six days I might only write about The National in anticipation for it.

Right now I'm listening to the painful "Geese of Beverly Road". For the past two hours I've just been listening to The National. I woke up with a rather somber, strange feeling and somehow that transferred into the need for The National. Everyone gets a little lost sometimes, I think some people are forever lost and it's hard to know where to put that mess. Simple is rarely simple. The National is not simple.

The other day I watched a great interview with Matt Berninger where he said that a lot of his songs have dark humor within them that people don't get. They think songs like "Conversation 16" in which he discusses putting his head in an oven ala Sylvia Plath are real. The interviewer went as far as asking him if that song was based in reality. Berninger obviously denied it and said it's meant to be silly. He's not afraid of eating anyone's brains and he's never tried to commit suicide. I'm not sure I completely buy that answer - maybe not to that extent but he's writing based in his own feelings for sure. I'd put a lot of money on it. He writes about the same recurring feelings and themes consistently.

Lately I'm starting to get a little lesson in things masquerading as something else and realizing that everything that seems like it means something might not but I'm damn sure that The National mean something. I have it tattooed on my body that it means something. More importantly, I feel it. I have seen Matt Berninger destroyed on stage while singing lyrics that obviously mean something to him. My best friend and I have joked about being jealous of his wife - then concluded that he must be a handful to deal with on a daily basis. Yeah, but imagine how incredible it would be to know someone who is so truly intense.

I don't want to sound like a 15-year-old talking about Justin Timberlake and how "Like I Love You" shatters her world but I do like the idea of having an external sound evoke so much internally. If I were a scientist I'd do some research on my brain and find out why I go back to The National every time I need something to surround me, almost like gluing everything together. Whether we love work or school or our friends, there are always those days when we want to get away from everything. We need a break from life. Sometimes I'd prefer to live out a day as someone else, not because I want to be someone else but because I'm exhausted. I'm older now so things are a little different, when I want a break I know how to shut off my mind and not care about anything. It's a little heartless but it's also necessary in order to not break your own heart. The National helps me with this. I think about Berninger's lyrics and genuinely believe that there's another ridiculously, stupid intense person in this world that doesn't know what to do too.

That's why I think I should just leave everyone I know, drop out of school, quit my job and travel with The National as a roadie - I don't know how to tune a guitar but I know how to duct tape a setlist to the floor and roll out a carpet. I know how to put a few Poland Spring waters on the ground and ice a nice bottle of wine. I could buy towels or carry microphones or really anything. I'll work for free - just a place to sleep and some food. I don't need any more material possessions, I don't need anybody else in my life, I just want the music. I just want to stand on the side of the stage every night and listen. If life is about finding something you love and surrounding yourself with it then this is what I should be doing. I'd miss my cat but it wouldn't be the entire year, just a few months.

I'm crazy. I'm crazy because I'm serious. I seriously would just drop everything if ever this was a possibility. I'm considering going online right now and searching for how one acquires jobs like this. I am just tired. I'm tired of seeing people give up and give in. I'm afraid it will happen to me too. When I say out loud that I see myself being successful, I'm starting to hear myself sounding like a child. Don't I know no one is successful anymore? How did I hang on to these childish, whimsical dreams for so long? I'm the only one left.

I believe it even more when I hear Matt Berninger sing.

"I'll do what I can to be a confident wreck." - M.B.

The Geese of Beverly Road Lyrics

We'll take ourselves out in the street
And wear the blood in our cheeks
Like red roses
We'll go from car to sleeping car
And whisper in their sleeping ears
We were here, we were here
We'll set off the geese of Beverly Road

Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome, totally genius
Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome

We won't be disappointed
We'll fight like girls for our place at the table
Our room on the floor
We'll set off the geese of Beverly Road

Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome, totally genius
Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome

We're the heirs to the glimmering world

We're drunk and sparking, our legs are open
Our hands are covered in cake
But I swear we didn't have any
I swear we didn't have any

Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome, totally genius
Hey, love, we'll get away with it
We'll run like we're awesome

15 September 2010

The title of this post might actually be inaccurate if taken literally. When I see Ray LaMontagne something comes over me that does make me feel a little woozy but mostly because his beard is so intoxicating (added to that voice and his hat collection) that I can't feel my feet. On a quiet night at home, I find myself searching through Youtube videos trying to find something of interest that I never caught before and keep coming back to fairly recent live footage of Ray.

Not too long ago I was having a discussion with a friend about the song "Shelter" off LaMontagne's first studio album, 2004's "Trouble". As usual, it's one of those songs I'm in love with but can rarely listen to these days because of the feelings I relate to it - and the person. There was a time in 2006 when this song was the greatest piece of music my ears could choose. 'Person' and I would laugh about how we couldn't pronounce LaMontagne correctly and it was just all love and turtledoves. Today, I'm much more realistic (or jaded) and realize love like the kind Ray sings about in "Shelter" might not exist or at least not last forever. Love is god awful. That does put a damper on a lot of really good music but nevertheless, Ray LaMontagne's music manages to overcome that with the absurd craftsmanship of every track and the genuine soul in his unbelievably beautiful voice. I cannot say enough good things about him. His elusive nature also adds this interesting, mysterious quality that makes songs like "Old Before Your Time" and "New York City's Killing Me" off his new album "God Willin' and the Creek Don't Rise" even more exquisite. I get off on his music like my cat does to catnip, you know what I'm saying?

Take a listen and a good, long look at Mr. Ray LaMontagne, whether you're already familiar with him or not.

This song is better than sex. Can I say that? Guess I just did. It is utterly, disgustingly, incredibly amazing beyond words.

"Held you in my arms one time, lost you just the same".... can you handle it? "I pictured you holding a picture of me. I still don't know what love means."....

Shelter Lyrics by Ray LaMontagne

I guess you don't need itI guess you don't want me to repeat itBut everything I have to give I'll give to youIt's not like we planned itYou tried to stay, but you could not stand itTo see me shut down slowAs though it was an easy thing to doListen whenAll of this around us'll fall overI tell you what we're gonna doYou will shelter me my loveAnd I will shelter youI will shelter youI left you heartbroken, but not until those very words were spokenHas anybody ever made such a fool out of youIt's hard to believe itEven as my eyes do see itThe very things that make you live are killing youListen when all of this around us'll fall overI tell you what we're gonna doYou will shelter me my loveI will shelter youListen whenAll of this around us'll fall overI tell you what we're gonna doYou will shelter me my loveI will shelter youIf you shelter me tooI will shelter youI will shelter you

I love Lindsey Buckingham. Not only is Fleetwood Mac one of the greatest bands to see live - and they continue to get better - but the first concert I ever worked in my life was for one of Mr. Buckingham's solo tours and it will forever stick with me. I remember seeing him before soundcheck walking around the entire perimeter of the venue making sure the sound was right from every angle. As I walked past him, we made eye contact for a second and I wanted to say something but his glare was so intense that it scared me off. I heard rumblings about him being really mean and slightly offended that his tour wasn't going as well as he expected but seeing him in that moment alone made me feel like I understood him a little bit. He's a perfectionist and wants his craft to be taken seriously and get the acclaim it deserves. I'm not sure why to this day people don't mention his name when discussing the greatest guitarists of all time. He is a visionary.

There's really a lot about Lindsey Buckingham to love but specifically it's been his solo song "Trouble" off the 1981 album Law and Order that has caught my attention in the past two days. I was in a coffee shop yesterday feeling kind of down when this song came on and at first I couldn't even recall who the artist was. It took me at least a couple minutes to recognize the voice as the entire song is sung in a high falsetto style that doesn't sound anything like his Fleetwood Mac days. I don't know if the song made me feel better or worse but I can't get it out of my head.

After doing some research, I found that this is the only song on the entire Law and Order album in which Lindsey doesn't play bass or drums - only guitar and vocals. Mick Fleetwood was asked to do drums and when things soured in the studio, a continuous loop of a four second drum track was used instead. I would never have known. In a way, I do find this song to have an interesting sexual quality to it but it's also really eerie and sad. I've heard several people say that perhaps Lindsey Buckingham is a little over the top both in concert and vocally (maybe even lyrically) but what's a musician without a little bravado? Interestingly, I found several clips online of this song that show how very different sides of a song can come out depending on the presentation of it. I think it takes a great piece of music to work in two completely different ways.

Check it out for yourself.

Most recent live, acoustic version. I think this is Buckingham's best vocals of the song (and okay, I've also always had a bit of a crush on him in this older man state he's in now, it just works.)

A live 1992 performance where not only does he look completely different but he's just so much cheesier and the song sounds completely different.

12 September 2010

Taken during his two night stint at Madison Square Garden at the end of February 2010, this video perfectly encompasses all that I love about a John Mayer concert. His recent addition of "Ain't No Sunshine" not only gives him an opportunity within the set to display what he's best at (guitar solos) but puts such a sophisticated spin on the entire concert. This song actually fits in with his usual collection of songs much better than his own earlier work does. Hearing "I Don't Trust Myself (Loving You)" and then "No Such Thing" never worked for me.

I was lucky enough to be at this performance with pretty much the same seat as the person taking this footage. This was the first time I saw him perform this live and over the summer he played it at every concert I went to - maybe even performing better than in this clip.

Below you can also find Bill Withers' best known version of this song that I have become obsessed with over the past 24 hours. After adding it to my "Lonely Mix", I can't stop listening. I don't understand how he fits so much into 2 minutes. His voice is breathtaking and the "I know, I know, I know" part takes up about 1/6 of the entire song. It almost feels like an inner monologue being played out in song. It's also interesting how much the delivery of the "I know" changes the song from one version to another. In Withers', it almost comes across as melancholy to me while Mayer's version is slightly breathless and darkly intimate. The balance of that is fantastic. I know there are tons of versions of this song and I definitely plan on finding more but for now I'm enjoying these.

Also: take note of the drummer in the second video. He gets so excited when the funky parts come up. I hope this guy is still alive and willing to be my friend. I want to borrow his striped blazer.

Ain't No Sunshine Lyrics

Ain't no sunshine when she's gone.
It's not warm when she's away.
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
And she's always gone too long anytime she goes away.

Wonder this time where she's gone,
Wonder if she's gone to stay
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone
And this house just ain't no home anytime she goes away.

And I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know

Hey, I ought to leave the young thing alone,
But ain't no sunshine when she's gone, only darkness everyday.
Ain't no sunshine when she's gone,
And this house just ain't no home anytime she goes away.

The weekends are always very strange for me. I'm an active person so anytime I'm left with as much as a little empty space in my schedule, it makes me nervous. I'm one of those people who doesn't want to be left alone with themselves. I like distractions and reasons to not think. Naturally, music is the perfect antidote. Since my closest friend had a severe accident, my best friends live in different states, and I'm a picky person, the weekends aren't what they used to be. I have friends that come and go, people I see from time to time but the person I spend the most time with is myself and my trusty iTunes catalog.

Just like everyone else, I have certain music that I feel at home with. There aren't any pretenses with these songs. They're not songs I have to get dressed up for or be with other people - they're songs that are mine. I am very musically sensitive in the sense that if I hear a song playing in someone else's car or in a restaurant or bar, I will instantly relate that song to that situation every time I hear it from there on out. Sometimes this is great and makes me love a song even more but occasionally it's the worst thing that could happen and I can never listen to the song again. Usually it takes a rather massive situation for this to occur but I always hate when it does. Take for example the gorgeous song "Dear Lord" by Joseph Arthur. I absolutely love this song - it could potentially be one of my favorite songs of all time. For a long time I didn't have it on my iTunes because I gradually tuned it out of my mind. Everything from the jangly, West Virginia sound of the guitar to the lyrics that so perfectly describe my ex-boyfriend, made me hate it. I hated the power it had over me. Every time I heard this stupid song I would cry like a maniac. With lyrics like "I'm sorry for the things I've done, I'm sorry for wanting to run" - when I hear it, it just brings back a time I want nothing more than to forget. Yes, this time was the basis of my personality today but I'd rather not think of the person that destroyed my youth (and shaped a great deal of myself). It's rough and I can't believe that a song could bring all that rushing back. And that's not even going into "Close to Me" - The Cure or "Your Eyes" - Peter Gabriel. They make me want to kill myself, figuratively. And for anyone that thinks I'm nuts, I dare you to consider your own personal history and tell me that there's not a song that does the same to you. I'm certain you'll find at least one if not a dozen others.

Finding old mix cds is like hell for me recently. The last two I found were from a person who committed suicide and the aforementioned lover. It's always great to hear love songs that now mean nothing - that are now probably on a cd for someone else. I love the art of a mix cd but the pain that comes after the initial rush is sometimes not worth it. I had a friend not so long ago who was making me a supposed mix catering to all my favorite styles - namely sensual tunes that he thought were more respectable than my more overtly sexy preferences. I saw on his iTunes that the list was named after me and everything. Great, I thought, I love new songs. I'm always more than ready to hear what turns other people on. Of course before I received said mix cd, we got into a musically charged fight and I will probably never receive it.

Music is such a strange animal. Music might be the biggest social tool - and lubricant - there is. More than sports and maybe even alcohol in some cases, music gets people talking and relating. I'm always amazed when I'm sitting at a dinner table and people start talking about music. Their eyes light up and they try to trade little stories that they think will make them sound impressive to the others, sometimes not even realizing that everyone at the table is trying to sound cool in one way or another. Sometimes I'm convinced that's the only reason people even talk about music. In some places it's almost taboo to talk about music in fear of sounding inferior. I had to delete a post on here one time because I spoke so inappropriately about a man I met at a bar that belittled me until I had no choice but to walk away. I had never come across such an arrogant person in my life. In my naivete, it was difficult for me to even believe that this man loved music as much as he was claiming. How could someone who was willing to sit with me for two hours discussing a single topic have such a strong disdain for music he didn't understand? He refused to even amuse the idea of someone like John Mayer having any talent whatsoever and bashed The National for becoming too mainstream. Unfortunately, the more I meet people who claim to be music lovers, the more I come across this same problem. It seems that every "music lover" of a certain age has the same opinions on what music should be. No young "hipster" guy ever openly admits appreciation for someone like John Mayer and any girl who likes him will bashfully say it or add the requisite "embarrassingly!" at the end. I've given up on trying to understand why this is. I continuously use the example that you wouldn't let someone else tell you what to eat so why do you let them influence what you listen to but clearly it's more important to be socially acceptable than - God Forbid! - like a pop artist. A band like The National could be making the greatest music of their career but if they're selling 300,000 albums in their first week doing so then all their "indie cred" is gone in certain circles. It's absolutely baffling to me. They're not working with Britney Spears' auto-tuning guy just because they're popular, they're still making the same album in their little studio whether they sell 1 copy or 1 million copies (clearly there's more to it than this but in theory they're still the same people with the same musical abilities regardless).

It has become so frequent that I hear music discussions I'd rather eavesdrop on than participate in that I have become very leery of ever discussing music myself. I don't like when people challenge me or try to test my music knowledge when they find out I want to be a music writer and I don't like having my own tastes on display in one-on-one conversations. I recently had a run-in like this on a Greyhound bus where I was suddenly put on the spot to discuss my "favorite genre". Granted, I'm a hypocrite because these are the kinds of questions I like to ask other people but when they come my way I try to avoid them. The person was very nice but my answer was incredibly jumbled. "Older R&B? Classic rock? Singer/Songwriter/'70's/folksy/country/twangy/quiet/dancy/hand clapping/hip shaking/short-type of songs"

Maybe I didn't say it in that way but I felt very strange. I felt like I didn't want to sound like an idiot and I didn't want to sound snooty at the same time. Somehow I almost felt like there was a right answer I should give. If you talk about music as if you know something about it, it comes across as pompous but in the same respect you can't act like you don't know anything. The thing I've always wondered is how anyone can judge someone else's taste when they probably know nothing about it if it's not their particular preference. There's an insane array of music out there! There's no way a single individual could be a master of it all in one lifetime. If someone told me right now that their favorite band in the world was Sugarland, I'd nod my head and really have no idea what to say. I don't know very much about contemporary country and therefore I can't tell you if they have great music or not. They could have some incredible lyrics, just because they're not my favorite doesn't mean they're not the best. There are patrons at the concert venue I work at all the time that are devout lovers of specific metal bands that I would consider awful at face value but really, have I given it a try? These people pray at the bottom of the stage these musicians perform on. They wear matching band shirts, get tattoos of their favorite lyrics, and sing along to every word. I am in awe of these people. I am one of these people. My outrageous love of The National is very often put into question among everyone from my friends to strangers. I have a tattoo dedicated to them, a half dozen National shirts in my closet, and listen to them absolutely obsessively. I don't think I'm weird so how could I ever judge another music lover even if it's not the kind of music I love? Actually, I tend to find that it's the people who really have an undying respect for the art of music that usually tell me they don't understand my particular interest but they love my passion for it. That's the attitude more people should have.

Sometimes it's even hard for me to believe that a few pieces of three minute works of art could have such a bearing on someone's life but that's the same kind of mystery that keeps me coming back. In my life, there have been some two hour movies that have made me feel intense things and I will watch them over and over again but are there ever any that I watch 100 times over again? No way. Are there songs I'll listen to over 100 times? Without question. In high school I went through what could only be considered the biggest singer/songwriter phase of my life. I would lay on my bedroom floor with my head up against a long, white dresser and just close my eyes trying to absorb every inch of an entire album by Howie Day or Josh Kelley or the great Jason Mraz. I'd listen to these songs so much and so intensely that they became part of the fabric of my being. I didn't necessarily intend for that to happen but they worked their way into my subconscious. When I hear Josh Kelley's "Home to Me", I am instantly brought back to that time. I guess now in some ways I wish they had been artists with a little more musical depth (I know some of my friends' high school experiences included Pavement, Sonic Youth, Nirvana, etc.) but for me these songs did have depth. I didn't know to listen to something because it was 'cool' or because someone was telling me to. I will certainly admit I had a slight *Nsync phase but I loved their acappela performances and still believe them to be rather decent singers (and dancers for that matter).

I kept a journal in high school and every entry would involve the music I was listening to. Of course I'm not the only one but I remember it was important to me to be very detailed. I would write down an entire album track by track and explain why it meant something to me. I'd use lyrics I knew by heart and write lists of all my current favorite songs. I'd look up similar artists everyday on AOL (the in thing at the time) and find interviews with my favorite musicians to see their influences and then look them up too. I'm not ashamed to say that through John Mayer I started loving jazz music. I guess the writers at Rolling Stone would probably laugh but I would never know who Dexter Gordon, John Coltrane, Charlie Parker, or even Miles Davis was without Mayer's influence. Because I had such a desire to learn, I can actually recognize music from these people, not just know their name so if that's embarrassing then I'm happy to be embarrassed.

I'll tell people upfront that I'm not keen on Leonard Cohen, although I hoped I would be, and that I think Joy Division is overrated. I'm almost positive that somehow certain things got good word of mouth and people started to believe that to be taken seriously they had to go with the flow whether they wanted to or not. Something is not instantly cool because it's "lo-fi" and something is not instantly uncool because it's catchy and produced. I just saw Train - unintentionally - for the third time in two months tonight and although I'll agree that their music is over the top corny, I sort of love it. Pat Monahan gets on stage and not only gives his all but isn't afraid of looking like a loser. He's flittering around like a ballerina and he's having a great time in the process. He's also a great vocalist and songwriter - better in my opinion than a lot of indie bands that all end up sounding the same. It's the bands - in every genre - that take risks that end up coming out the victors.

I've been to over 30 John Mayer concerts and I'll tell you right now that besides some preppy girls that are too afraid to make fools out of themselves, everyone has a good time. At the 12 or so concerts of The National I've been to, I'd be hard pressed to think of more than a handful of people that looked like they were enjoying themselves. If you check out a video on Youtube of these people at the Brooklyn or Manhattan shows, they look like zombies while Matt Berninger is out there singing his soul out. It's almost like these people don't want to appear as if they're having a good time. Wearing their perfect pair of $200 vintage oxfords and their perfectly placed Urban Outfitters fedoras, heaven forbid they shake their hips a little. I am like this too sometimes, especially if I'm alone and a little worried of looking like the creepy, tall one, but by mid-show I tend to get over it whether I want to or not. I am taken in by the music I love more than most of my own family members. When someone's voice is in your ear every day for years you tend to get an attachment to them. I have been hearing John Mayer's voice in my ears for nearly 10 years now. That's longer than all my relationships combined and most of my friendships. When he's out having sex with half of Hollywood, it's not going to stop me from thinking of him as Uncle John. He's my poet. I don't care what the skinny guy in the bar with the tight "Ithaca is Gorges" shirt tells me, you know? I don't get it. And it's not just those kinds of people, it's much more than that. A lot of people preface their favorite music by saying they know it's "not cool" or something like that. I am a victim of this very often as well for some reason. I love Hall and Oates. Do you know how many people hate Hall and Oates? Neither did I until I started telling people I loved them. The game of music is very weird.

ANYWAY, I think this all started by explaining why I get lonely on the weekends. I used to have tons of people around me all time time. My friend and I would bring a bunch of people back over to my place after the bar or we'd get invited to a party or something and now that my partner in crime is otherwise detained, I'm left alone. When I'm wallowing the pain away in a drink or in someone else's company, the pain is easier but when it's a Saturday night and I know what I'm missing, it's a lot more difficult. I get a little sappy and start to feel sorry for myself and end up listening to The National or watching Chelsea Lately, depending on whether I want to get more depressed or pick myself up. In times like these I have my friendly musical voices to keep me company and I'd rather that than people I don't know - unless the people I don't know are the new songs I'm about to download on iTunes.

And as promised, here are the top 20 songs that I enjoy listening to while I'm all alone.

Learning to Fly

I am an aspiring music journalist and amateur photographer so all photos that look professional are probably stolen from somewhere and absolutely all videos are stolen from Youtube. I do love music though and do not discriminate towards any genre. If you love music too and think I'm completely missing the best bands on earth, email me. I want to hear from everyone. Send me playlists, songs, rants, anything.