This is why I Iove writing

Despite the creaking joints and sore head as the Olster hauled me round the lake, there was a sniff of something good in the air this morning.

Despite the abundant litter, a dead eel, and an extremely large dog turd that looked frighteningly fresh and chocolate mousse-like and good enough to – er, no, we won’t go there; despite the low thrumming sound all-of-a-sudden coming from my exhaust (my car’s exhaust – not er, mine), despite that it’s now warm enough to hang the washing out which means I can no longer be lazy and shove it in the dryer, despite the fact that the black pudding’s out of date and my goose egg will never be the same without it, despite all that, I came home to an email which made me float out of my chair…

…I don’t know how you do it but Kimi is amazing. I was telling my hubby this morning. I’m at where Kimi has to eat brains. Oh my god that is so ?@;#$%&#! and @#~&%, so gross, I can’t put it down and don’t want it to end. This book has kept me hooked all the way through and that’s rare for any book to do that. You must write more and more and more! Jessica…

I did. I thought, if Kimi can suck brains up a curly straw, then a bit of out-of-date black pudding shouldn’t be too hard to stomach. Besides, Jessica’s sweary email made me so joyous I would have eaten a scabby monkey.