Where reality bends to Wholeness

Tag Archives: Sacred sexuality

Once upon a time there was a day without night and while the
world was very beautiful, wrapped in the incandescence of light, it was so unceasing as to seem sometimes cruel. There were no secrets, no closed eyes, all was open and visible, mystery impossible. Too bright, too demanding, too relentless. And because there was no night there was no shadow nor variation, no rest from the screaming lights of constant morning. And because there was no night to hold balance to the day, af- ter some time the people were always weary and seeing became tiresome. They wished to close their ever-open eyes and so they prayed and asked for respite. They asked that they may sometimes fall into a sleep in which they would lose themselves for a time. So the Ancient Ones considered this request. If we give the people rest then things will change, they said. If we give the people a time to close their eyes they will forget and what damage can they do when they are forgetful? The Ancient Ones could not foretell every detail yet they shuddered to think what could be hidden if the day was replaced with something darker. Yet they have prayed this, and they do look tired. What shall we do? One Ancient One stepped forward, bowed its head, and said: “Perhaps I am unwise yet I will go into this world. I will hold a space between us, being the Alpha and Omega we will be the beginnings of this new world, this world of two-ness. And
I will breathe ourself into this space and when it is time to return we will return ourself to one.” The other Ancient Ones nodded their heads and allowed. And so the Ancient One dreamed a world in which there was day and night. And then it kissed its Dream, sending its breath into the Dream. And then the Dream kissed the Ancient One and they were two yet one was giving and the other receiving as they passed the kiss of cre- ation back and forth. Breath and Light they cycled together. One by day, the other by night, holding within them all of Creation. The Ancient One is the Sun and the Moon. The Day and the Night. Father and Mother.
Yet they are one; they are two. Between them we are the children they Dreamed.

Sacred geometry! Before we talk about the shapes of the symbols we must review sacred geometry in connection to numerology.

O Wholeness is a point (or sphere)

1 is a line (initiation)

2 are two connecting lines (balance)

3 is a triangle (creation)

4 is a square (stability)

5 is a pentagon (change)

6 is a star of david (harmony)

7 is a seven pointed star (mystery)

8 is an octagon (power)

9 is the triplicity (love)

11 is the ladder to the stars and back

22 is the mysteries manifest

So now remove your intellect and let’s look at the numbers as shapes only and see what they tell us about themselves. Remember these symbols are not static. They are 3-dimensional, movable, and are filled with Light and Breath and as such they should be turned around, played with, and will give us insight as we play.

O/0 and I/1 are the only two symbols that have dual-usage in the English glyphs.

0 is the Sphere. It is that which embraces everything bright and dark and all paths lead to it. It is the Mother of the celestial orbs. It is the point from which everything is born and it is completely whole and the embrace of the All. It is the womb and tomb. It is entering the unknown. It is the round and as such the feminine who receives everything.

It is an OH-pening. The O is an oh-pening to the great Divine just as the Mother is an Opening to the earth and to the stars. She opens the doors.

The sound: (z) eh (r) oh

eh – the divine outpouring over the waters

oh – the embrace of the Mother

I/1 is the line. The line is the beginning of self-actualization and the masculine thrust into and out of the feminine womb. 1 is the number of the phallus and potentiation. Its magic is the ability to draw boundaries and mark territories. It is the beginning of power as an active force in the world. It marks the birth and beginning of the soul’s journey. Osiris/Jospeh. Fire.

1 is the boundary between this world and that. When the father thrusts through to manifestation via the Oh-pening of the Mother he begins to lay down the laws of a natural order. This is the beginning of the law-making and the first boundary line. This is the veil.

The sound: Uh (n)

Uh – The sound of eternity, imminence and destiny

2 – Reintroduces the feminine to the masculine line with her curvaceous touch. Remember two is about balance and partnership. Put a mirror image next to the 2 and what do you see? A heart on a stable line. Isis/Mary. Water.

The sound: t (oo)

The listener, the echo

2 begins duality. The monad is divided into two souls, the twins, and they are lifted into a dance of manifestation. From their love is born all of Creation and between them they hold the heart of things. They share one heart although they are two beings.

3 – The masculine 1 plus the feminine 2 yields the divine child, 3. Three is the creative impulse, which is magic. This is the child of promise being rocked or nursed. He is being thrust out into the world to make his mark. Horus/Jesus. Air.

Within three is the breath of blessing from the two. They send out their mist and bless the world with the promise of multiplicity. Three mixes breath and light to create. Three is the first spoken word from which all else is born.

The sound: (thr) ee

Vitalization and pulsing

4 – 4 is the balancing of the energy of 3 in which the creative potential is grounded, made useful, and becomes formed. And so the symbol is squared/closed and the energy is harnessed. Earth.

Four is the beginnings of life itself. This is where actual manifestation occurs. The heart of humanity is born here and the actual form of the group mind and those empathic nexus routes are here in four.

The sound: (f) uh (r)

imminence, holding destiny

5 – Like a rocking chair, 5 finds its balance in movement. It rocks on the fulcrum of its base, gaining momentum from its own movement to breathe new life into that which it faces.

Five sends itself out into experiences, adventures, and many forms. It is rhythm. It is rocking and rolling! It is the drum-beat that makes us move and dance. It is creative fiery impulses and the energy to follow through on them.

6 – The thrusting line wraps into itself as it instantly transforms into the feminine round. The music of family, dreams, and purposeful living are held within the six. This is the holding of the masculine seed within the feminine womb.

Six wants to wrap herself around everything and so she creates a sacred space to do this. She is all about space and making spaces and opening spaces and dreaming spaces. She holds her spaces in her embrace and is the O in form.

The sound: (s) i (x)

Teaches giving, benevolent, Queen

7 – Seven, like the lightening bolt, reaches down to the Earth and back up to the sky. It is a penetrating number. It brings the mysteries of the sky down to earth and up again. It does not create but it transmutes and makes the transcendent imminent.

7 wants to know! 7 is the mysteries brought into form. It is the 1 in form who is always reaching and stretching back to the stars. 7 is the bridge between the sky and the ground. The stars and the earth. This is why seven is the warrior-priest. He knows the mysteries and dies to them. The number of the twice born.

The sound: s (eh) v (eh) n

The desire to actively bless

8 – Eight is the symbol of infinity. It is two spheres interconnecting in a rhythmic embrace. Recall eight is the number of power and true power comes when one realizes she is embraced by the whole and then begins to participate by embracing the whole back.

Eight has died to the mysteries and now embraces them and is embraced by them. She is the balance of inner and outer work. She balances the orbs of the sun and the moon in her flowing arms and as such becomes power manifest.

The sound: ae (t)

The practical priest, the grounded primal sigh

9 – 9 is the six reversed. As six holds her sacred space within her; nine pours his sacred space without. This is the spilling of the seed rather than the holding of the seed. This is the sexual act from the male perspective in which he sends himself out as a gift to humanity.

Empathy is artful connection between individuals. Artful implies there is a talent and a precision to it. It means that empathy is not some willy-nilly thing that just happens to us. Empathy clearly is a choice. Empathy is the art of when and how we bond with others. When we let down our barriers (and we all have barriers) then we can share a space with others. This space is the empathic connecting point. This is where You and I share space between us. This is where magic between beings happen. This is where true linking and communication is possible. This is where we share dreamscapes and healing touches with individuals within the group heart.

Empathy, in its pure state, is feeling for & with others through our connections in the Green heart. This is a beautiful, beautiful gift. It allows us to literally feel along with those around us. It allows us to keep our spaces honest and clear without the emotional murkiness that can so often underlay human to human interactions.

Once upon a time there was a day without night and while the world was very beautiful, wrapped in the incandescence of light, it was so unceasing as to seem sometimes cruel. There were no secrets, no closed eyes, all was open and visible, mystery impossible. Too bright, too demanding, too relentless. And because there was no night there was no shadow nor variation, no rest from the screaming lights of constant morning. And because there was no night to hold balance to the day after some time the people were always weary and seeing became tiresome. They wished to close their ever-open eyes and so they prayed and asked for respite. They asked that they may sometimes fall into a sleep in which they would lose themselves for a time. So the Ancient Ones considered this request. If we give the people rest then things will change, they said. If we give the people a time to close their eyes they will forget and what damage can they do when they are forgetful? The Ancient Ones could not foretell every detail yet they shuddered to think what could be hidden if the day was replaced with something darker. Yet they have prayed this, and they do look tired. What shall we do? One Ancient One stepped forward, bowed its head, and said: “Perhaps I am unwise yet I will go into this world. I will hold a space between us, being the Alpha and Omega we will be the beginnings of this new world, this world of two-ness. And I will breathe ourself into this space and when it is time to return we will return ourself to one.” The other Ancient Ones nodded their heads and allowed. And so the Ancient One dreamed a world in which there was day and night. And then it kissed its Dream, sending its breath into the Dream. And then the Dream kissed the Ancient One and they were two yet one was giving and the other receiving as they passed the kiss of creation back and forth. Breath and Light they cycled together. One by day, the other by night, holding within them all of Creation. The Ancient One is the Sun and the Moon. The Day and the Night. Father and Mother. Yet they are one; they are two. Between them we are the children they Dreamed.

The Lovers (6) are the anima and animus. They are the dots in the yin-yang. They are the him in her and the her in him and the balance of opposites. Taken as one unit they are the whole before separation. Yet they are plural so we cannot take them as one unit. We must see them as their own selves.

The Lovers see Divinity in the other and as such they offer mirrors to each other. It is said we can only know our wonderful natures in the eyes of another. The reflection of our beauty in their eyes offers an insight into how beautiful the Parents find us. Our presence in the life of another is a miracle and all Love is a gift. And so this Archetype is the divine Lover who is led to mystical union via passionate embrace with another. So, in some way or form, the Beloved is always God. The poetry we write for the object of our affection is religious poetry. The mystical union is with the Divine in the form of the Other. It is when we forget this that we fall into the melodramas of relationship politics.

So the Lover asks us to step outside of being “in love” and asks us to actually be Love. We are pushed to embody Love in every breath and every moment (after all, we’re made of the stuff). Our relationships with others are opportunities to do this both in our reactions to them and in the way we treat ourselves through our relationships.

Is this action loving both to me and to the Other? Am I living in a loving way? How do I love myself? How do I love others? Remember we are as much an embodiment of the Divine as those we meet each day.

Love is expansive and does not limit itself. The Lover, too, is expansive and vulnerable. Like Aphrodite Love is born from oceanic emotion. And like all waters Love flows naturally where it is welcomed.

It is impossible to truly Love another if you are not in love with yourself. And so any love relationship is a love affair with the self, which is why so many are fraught with tangles and insecurities.

Remember everything is sex. The dance of energies between the sun on the earth’s skin and the breath we exhale out for the trees to breath in are intricate webs of sexuality. And so the Lover is the personification of all this. She is the owner of this dynamic play between energy and brings into herself the abundance of the Universe and sends out the expansiveness of her own abundance. It is when she feels lack in herself and forgets to drink in the energies around her that she becomes stingy and jealous and the “Lover scorned.” In this face he is obsessive, egotistical, and dangerous. Energy must be free-flowing in order to be Love and the Lover, in whichever face, is here to remind us.

Ah, sex. What a fun topic! Except when it isn’t. It’s amazing how loaded sexuality is for so many people. It’s impossible to talk about sexual dysfunction as merely a physical phenomenon when so much of our collective unconscious (and conscious!) is taken up with sexual metaphor, nuance, and imagery. We are all sexual beings created through the sexual act (test tube babies aside, maybe). Everything is energy and all energy is sexual. That may seem like a leap but every interaction has a receptive and a thrusting element. The Taoist yin-yang is code for this. The masculine yang generates as the feminine yin weaves and Creation is born. A fun way to think about the Big Bang! Kundalini energy, a major aspect of yoga practice, is (among other things) sexual energy and when unlocked it offers unimaginable creative potential for healing and growth.

Yet the number of hang-ups we have surrounding sex are stunning. So many issues of shame and guilt are wrapped up around our sexuality, body image, vulnerability, trust, abandonment, and passion. And far, far, far too often sex is wound up with abuse. It’s no wonder sometimes the body doesn’t want to work. In many people, women and men, sex and intimacy push all the red danger buttons. In sex we literally are taking someone else’s essence into our body or for the guys, entering another’s most private space. I’ve heard guys describe intimacy issues as a fear of drowning, being swallowed up, whereas for women it is often about feeling tainted, used, violated. No matter how post-modern we pretend to be ideas of “sin” often live in the body itself. So whenever I have a guest with sexual dysfunction, sacral issues, menstrual pain, or intimacy concerns the first step is to have them ask where “sin” lives in their body. Nearly every time it is near or around the genitals. So, silly as it sounds, we go through a mind/body exercise of cleaning out their sin closet.

Meditation! Breathing is the primary sexual act. It also, like sex, releases feel-good hormones (endorphins) in the body when we do it right. So a fun meditative exercise is to unwind the breath by focusing on each of the seven chakras and letting each one pulse to its natural rhythm. Feel where the breath is tight or uncomfortable and notice without judgement. Then allow the breath to move naturally through the chakras. Using imagination allow the energy centers to “kiss” each other and see which are naturally compatible and which are not. That’ll give a good idea on where we may need some extra love. If you have a willing partner then breathe together, allowing the chakras to connect/link (as in energy healing but with the intimate intention). Experience where your bond is most comfortable and where it may seem a little weak. Remember to have fun with this! It can be vulnerable so keeping it playful is best.

Exercise! The body needs to feel alive and up to the task and the function of the heart is directly connected to erection. Cardio will help. And for women, who too often have body image concerns, exercise makes us feel more vital and connected.

Nutrition! Essential fatty acids, green foods, anything that is good for the heart. And chocolate, which stimulates endorphin production.

Supplements/Herbs! For the guys, zinc is of major importance. For the ladies, DHEA. For both, classic euphorics like damiana and kava. I make an aromatherapy blend, which includes jasmine, rose, patchouli, clary sage, mandarin, amber, and ylang-ylang. These oils are all classic euphorics, which stimulate the pituitary gland, create a relaxed and open state, and the clary sage has a hormone balancing effect, which helps with menopause and anxiety too. Because they can be mixed into a massage oil they can foster intimacy.

Communication. We hear this so many times it almost seems trite but healthy long-term sexuality comes from an open, trusting connection. When we feel safe and open then bonding is natural whether it results in the sex act or not. When we are holding onto our baggage, expecting our partner to read our minds, and keeping a laundry list of resentments sex may become just another worry instead of a joyful experience.