Q&A - Why Is My Stepson a Trouble-Maker?

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Q: I'm in my second marriage and I have four kids from a past relationship. The kids get along great with my husband. The problem is my stepson: He’s always causing trouble among my kids and between his father and me. He lies and sometimes steals. I've talked with my husband about his son's behavior, but he gets defensive. I discipline my children and try to raise them being polite and respectful. What can I do? Please help!

-Itzia R.A: Hi Itzia,

Many blended families face this very problem when merging two families into a single unit. I read that more than 30 million children currently live with a stepparent, which makes the blended family one of the fastest-growing living arrangements in the U.S. As you’ve discovered, when both parties bring children to a new marriage, there’s often turmoil and conflict while everyone learns how to live under the same roof.

Children often act out emotionally in response to this situation, and this may explain your stepson’s behavior. I think the best course of action is to find a family therapist who can help all of you address the issues. It’s likely that some members of your new family will resist counseling, so you’ll have to take the lead. Discuss this honestly and openly with your husband, and then make that appointment.