Halloween Clean-Up Guide

Is Your Car A Rotting Corpse This Morning?

You've closed the blinds, barred the doors and huddled together for safety. Halloween — the night for ghouls and ghosts to run free, not to mention hooligans who’ll see your brand new Nissan 370Z as the ultimate target for their “tricks" — is finally over. And as hard as you tried to ignore it, you know that a few eggs, some toilet paper and maybe a few cans of shaving cream are all the ingredients required for a good old-fashioned car trashing.

We’ll give you a moment to shudder at the thought of such vandalism, but it’s time to realize that you’re not safe from such ghoulish injustices and that you should use your own childhood memories of mischief to your advantage to prepare for the inevitable.

In case your memories are a little foggy (from all the sugar highs that night), use the tips below to help save your car from permanent damage the day after the madness.

eggs

What to expect in the morning

It’s a morning not unlike any other. You shower, dress and get ready for work — then you step outside to the horror of all horrors: your baby is smattered with eggs from nose to tail. Scrambled immediately comes to mind and the whiff of cooked eggs may make you nauseous for years to come — but don’t panic. Walk back inside, pick up the phone and call work — you’ll need a day off for this one.

As harmless as eggs seem, they can actually wreak havoc on vehicle paint surfaces and cause long-lasting, permanent damage. The yolk that’s now smeared all over your car has to break free somehow, and the impact of the egg hitting your car causes shell fragments to burst over the surface in sequential rings, which cause scratches. Depending on the proximity of the pitcher, these scratches could be buffable or they could pierce the top coat, and sometimes even chip away paint to reveal the metal body beneath. Not only are the shells a danger, but the actual yolk and egg white are extremely corrosive to paint surfaces, and can actually eat into the car’s surface if left on too long.

How to deal with it

Unfortunately with eggs, if you snooze, you lose — a layer of paint, that is. If not removed immediately, an egg will cause permanent damage to any and all paints, no matter how well-waxed and/or maintained the vehicle is. So, if you’re waking up to a sunny-side-up quarter panel, the damage will have already been done. What you need to do is clean the surface as much as possible with water.

Use the pressure from a hose to clear off the dried egg so that you don't rub miniscule bits of eggshell around the surface (which would cause more scratches than you already have to deal with). Once you’ve cleared the surface, take a closer look at the area. If the paint has been etched away — the surface will feel rough — then a respray is necessary; otherwise, you’ll be left with a permanent scar. Often, the egg will cause the paint to look foggy or faded, which can also only be corrected by repainting the car.

However, if the egg shells caused no damage and you got to the egg in time, an overall wash, clay bar and wax may do the trick to mask the nasty prank. Also, the color of your car will help; lighter shades — such as silver, white and beige — won’t show as much scarring as black, blue or dark green.

Recommended products

For something like an egg beating, you need to look for cleaning products that are made to tackle harmful substances, yet are still easy enough that the average consumer — not a detailing expert — can use them. One such product line is the Clay Magic Detailing Kit (approximately $14.99). There’s some advantage to using the original six-patented clay bar to really give your car that showroom finish, as well as to repair any damages caused by flying eggs and other projectiles.

Another good option might be to look at swirl-removing products. Although these products are usually geared toward removing damage caused by abrasive materials (such as a wool pad), they could possibly take out some of the markings left by the egg. Look to products such as Auto Magic XP Swirl Remover (approximately $24 for 1 gallon).