What Other People Think of Me is None of My Business

Many people have told me over the course of my life that ““What other people think about you is none of your business.” Early in my life, and even in recent times, I had striven to be liked, to not upset people, to keep the peace, but I found all I managed to do was put myself in a twist trying to please everyone in all things.

When I was first told this quote, “What Other People Think of me is None of my Business”, it was one of those light bulb moments. You know the one when it all seems so clear and simple. I realized in an instant that what people think about me, truly isn’t about me. It is about them, not me. Their thoughts are not my business. It is theirs.I had been striving for the impossible. To always be thought of in the “right way” by other people. While it is “nice” to be highly thought of by others, I now understand that it is far more beneficial, and far more achievable to be highly thought of by myself.

Are you a people pleaser, but harbour deep felt resentment in doing so? It is impossible to make everyone happy with the choices we make. If you worry about getting everyone’s approval, you’d never get anywhere. If you let what others think of you become your business, it will consume all of your time and energy, draining you of the ability to move on in your life.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean being completely ignorant of others feelings, but rather their thoughts about you. You cannot change their mind by constantly worrying and stressing about what they think of you. What you can do, is be the person you are truly meant to be and feel comfortable with that. More than comfortable though, be the person that you want to spend your time with. Forget the thoughts about you from others and concentrate on the thoughts you have about yourself.

I have done a lot of soul searching in recent years and have finally learned to accept and love the person I am without having to put on any fronts. I no longer live my life based on what others might think of me, whether it be negative or positive. We all like to hear those positive thoughts from others, but remember that whatever the thoughts from others are, it “Is None of Our Business”. The words from others are useless unless we believe them to be true in our own hearts.

I originally wrote this article over a year ago. Recent events have highlighted what an important topic it still is to so many people around the world and I thought it was timely to re-post.

Enjoy, and remember “What Other People Think of Me is None of My Business” and in reality they probably have other things on their minds other than what you are doing

Thank you! It is just exactly how I feel and what I think . It is like you put my thoughts on a paper .When I first time (and it was years ago) saw quote from Coco Chanel: “I don’t care what you think about me. I don’t think about you at all.” It was so rude and meanwhile very helpful how to not get hurt from other peoples. This what you wrote is polite way how to say the same. I was also for years thinking all rhe time what others will think and I recognized that I am not living my life but other peoples life but you cant be good to all of them as they are not the same,what is good for one is not good for otheres and than I read another quote -God gives as relatives and thanks to God that we can choose our friends.:) And those 2 quotes put together makes rules how to live life without comparision.

Everyone is differant, some give opinions, others don’t, those who give opinions, can be loved or hated sometimes the words come out in the wrong order by accident. Those who keep their gob shut may also be judged as brilliant or terrible depending on how they look facial expressios. Always seek a second opinion and never judge a book by it’s looks on the outside.

Hello Brenda,I stumbled across MInd Recipes I thought I would send you an email.
As beings of light in human form we walk daily within a highway of energies, and learning to navigate the duality of energies is of equal importance and empowering to ones search for understanding and learning of ones divine nature.I wish you well in your explorations of self and vistas of your divine nature. All the best Nysani

Do you have a spam issue on this site; I also am a blogger, and I was curious about your situation; many of us have created some nice methods and we are looking to swap methods with other folks, please shoot me an email if interested.

Thank you very much for your reply! I feel loads better already and will be working hard on myself to not worry about things I can’t control. In the mean time Ive been going through your other posts and have already learnt a lot more about making my own choices in life etc. I think your such a wise and inspirational person and will be recommending your site to others ‘in need’ here in the UK thank you very much.

Beware of the “Universalist”. I am not talking about someone with wonderfully open religious views or an alien traveler that lands on your doorstep; I am warning you of the person that looks to the Universe for ALL of their wisdom. They regurgitate one line after another from some self-help book that they read or fire-walking seminar that they attended, all aimed at making sense of their character deficiencies or bad luck. They take rules of thumb that your grandmother taught you and turn them into absolute law, punishable by execution of reason. The truth of the matter is that the Universe can’t be defined in black and white, or even in technicolor for that matter.

This particular article has great wisdom, because it is balanced in offering an alternative to dealing with an often over-demanding world. Come to think of it, so do most of the other self-help books that I have ever browsed in the waiting room of my shrink. The ever-so-important key that so many references fail to mention is not to take their advice as your eternal gospel. Instead, use your intellect, your heart, your vast experiences, and your raw intuition to make rational choices on how to live your life to it’s fullest. Simply repeating the latest self-help fad phrase again and again doesn’t do anyone any good, especially you. It’s perfectly healthy to be consistently inconsistent.

Yup, there is a wonderfully euphoric Universe out there, but we all still live on Planet Earth. Please stay grounded in your search for intergalactic enlightenment….

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Hi Brenda, Great to discover your site! Mind Recipes is a food for thought that lifts you up and open your awareness of appreciation in what Life can give. I really admire your positivity in Life. Now that I read some of the articles in your page…i’m sure that this will be a part of my mornings. A good way to start each day….

Tammy

Thank you. I could relate to your story so much. Similar thing happened to me but I spent years being angry and bitter. If only I had read this all those years ago.