Donald Trump could play many 'Wizard of Oz' characters: Letter

We're off to see the Donald, the wonderful Donald of Oz. Let's go down the yellow brick garden path and meet the motley cast of characters.

Donald Trump is Professor Marvel, the travelling carny charlatan whose trunk holds broken promises and sadistic delights. Donald is the self-proclaimed Wizard behind the curtain hiding smoke and mirrors. Donald is the human hot air balloon whose leakage precludes a return flight to Kansas or New York City, unless Princess Ivanka can manufacture faux ruby slippers using outsourced slave labor. Of course, the Wizard then risks a relapse of his old military deferment if he clicks his bad heels together.

Donald is the Mayor of Munchkinland whose hands are small and humanity smaller. Donald is the brainless, teleprompter-dependent Scarecrow whose straw-stuffed head cannot produce intelligent thought. Donald is the heartless, rusty Tin Man whose oil can is empty of empathy and love. Donald is the Cowardly Lion whose bluster and bravado are as fake as his combed-over orange mane.

Donald is the Wicked Witch of the East, West, North and South whose poisonous cauldron will bubble until the blessed day when a house falls on him. Trump Tower or Mar-A-Lago will suffice.

Perhaps this is actually a bad dream and not “The Apprentice of Oz.” Perhaps we'll awaken to the real Auntie Em tweeting “There's no place like home.”