– You can find out about the movie me and Goldust made here and here. Post-production, baby! Also, follow that wrestling promotion I work for/am increasingly involved in helping run here. Our next show is in Austin on January 5. Chris Hero and Takaaki Watanabe are gonna be there. So should you!

Please click through to enjoy the Best and Worst of WWE Raw for December 16, 2013.

I was really impressed with the quality of pretty much every match last night (I fast forwarded through the Divas match). I hated Brhodes taking another non-title loss but the match itself was quite good and I love Rey and Show’s new tag finisher. Ziggler and Fandango was fine for what it was and I’m glad they slightly unburied Ziggler. Big E/Henry v. Real Americans was a REALLY good tag match that I would absolutely not have a problem seeing on a show I paid money for. RybAxel/ToF at least moved a story forward and I totally dug Truth and Woods dancing with the Funkadactyls–that was just FUN. Shield v. Punk/Usos was everything you’d expect and I love that they re-solidified the Shield’s cohesiveness because if they’re gonna break up a team that works SO WELL together, it should be by the Seinfeld rules of breakups–”Elaine, breaking up is like knocking over a Coke machine. You can’t do it in one push; you gotta rock it back and forth a few times and then it goes over.” The Main Event was another PPV-worthy match and I was totally OK with Orton taking a DQ because that’s exactly what his character should be doing right now. You don’t want to make Bryan weak if his priming for a run at the title but you also can’t have Orton take clean loss the night after winning “the most important match/title/everything in wrestling history” so you make him look like a guy who’s desperate and terrified of losing his precious title that he’s still trying to convince himself he deserves.

I still only just read the first paragraph, but felt the need to come here and tell you that “over-explainer orton vs lol-whatever-er cena” thing made my whole week and forced me to re-explain what is your column to my family that kept asking me why I was laughing so loud.

If it means that we get seven pages full of gold like “Randy: WHAT DID YOU SAY, SOMEBODY TURN OFF HIS MICROPHONE, THAT HAND-SIZED CYLINDRICAL DEVICE HE’S HOLDING THAT AMPLIFIES HIS VOICE, CUT POWER TO IT SO THAT IT MAY NOT AMPLIFY HIS VOICE FURTHER,” I’m all for it.

Hey Brandon, I brought this up last night, but is there any chance we might ever be able to do west coast Raw Open Discussion threads as well?

Even when I’m off work, I have found streams to be very unreliable ever since USA took away the east coast feed on their HD network. I can’t be the only one who isn’t able to watch Raw until 8pm PST, but I also don’t know what the demand for that would be like. Does anyone else have this issue as well?

So this will probably be stated a million more times, and has probably been expressed already…

But man, did WWE miss out on a great chance to recreate the Mankind moment. I am pretty sure everyone lost their collective heads when we realized what was coming. Super deflated when I realized it was a non-title match…

Unless this ends with D-Bry at ‘Mania, last night will be just another great match. That’s fine and all, but for a company that is obsessed with OMG! moments, last night woud’ve been a historic one.

Dude, Brandon, I feel you’re looking too far into the Shield match this week, the Uso’s are just boring as shit and the crowd was dead for most of the night and weren’t going to react to anyone who wasn’t a big star. I thought the match was pretty boring too, not to mention that I wait all night for Punk to wrestle and just see him do some signatures. Bullshit.

well, dean ambrose kissing roman reigns’s head gave me all the warm and fuzzy feelings and smiles. (also, I’ll never get tired or bored of watching the shield through all the opponet’s tag team members outside except for their target, make a tag, sacrifice one of them to distract their opponet only for the second and legal one to finish the deal (especially if he was reigns with a SPEAR, GOD GOOD, HE BROKE THEM IN HALF *trademarked*)).

Funny how Cena says that all Randy Orton does is make excuses and he starts off Raw by making up reasons as to why Orton isn’t really the champion.

In fact, Cena is Mr. Excuse. Any time he loses, he always has to make up some B.S. as to why it didn’t count. Interference, cheating, injury, “flukes”, bla bla. He’s cried every single excuse in the book. More so than Randy Orton definitely.

Well Cena usually does have good reasons because they book him to only lose in ridiculous situations were the guy has to handcuff him, or three guys have to attack, etc.. If those same things happened to Orton he’d complain too.

Yeah, the same guy who innovated the idea of taping his opponent to a ring-post so he doesn’t stand up in a Last Man Standing match. Next night when Batista complained, know what he said? That it was an INTELLECTUAL win over him.

I honestly only find JBL annoying at this point and that’s part of his heel character. The problem comes when he beats the other commentators with logic and then someone watching at home for the first time could think that Bryan’s a whiny little bitch, and that Randy Orton is THE FACE OF THE WWE COMPANY or something.

Right. I don’t mind JBL being a heel character but the problem comes when the others don’t either fail or just flat out don’t try to disagree with him. The good guys should be the ones winning the arguments with logic.

My problem with King is more just that he doesn’t add anything at all anymore and I just wish they’d put him out to pasture and give someone younger a chance.

and the worst thing is how good the matches were! so, it’s not like calling them would be boring and that mentioning catchphrases, stupidly hyporboling sh*t, raising their voices, calling conspiricy theories, taking selfies and bringing in the authority in every topic was needed.

@ML Kennedy were they, really?! I only heard them debating over what to get the divas for christmas and how the thing tamina would love to get the most on it is a man, if she wasn’t a man herself already! (or did my mind make that up, guys? I was a bit tired last night and might have been hearing the announcers through my ass, but I could swear that was all they talked about in the divas match)

@themo
sort-of. They said they’d get her whatever she wanted for Christmas cause they’d be scared of her. So not bad, except that it came from this commentary crew, so it’s easily imaginable that it came with what you said behind it.

Something I wanted to add is, on the main event I felt that Daniel Bryan… as the angle is now, I don’t think, if you’re a fan of Daniel Bryan, that you could possibly want him to win the title anymore than you do right now. So the only two reasons that WWE could be holding off on it are 1) They’re so OCDic that they feel they need to do it at one of the big shows, or 2) They’re not going to do it.

What was scary about the main event was how much offense Orton got in, if you think about it he was dominating most of the match and the reason that it worked so well was because when Bryan got a move or two in your brain was like, “FUCK YES KILL HIM!” But if you think about it most of their PPV matches involved Bryan being dominant for most of the match, or at least not as in much trouble as he was last night. That’s just my nitpicking I suppose.

while I think this year might very well be wwe’s best in-ring product in a decade or more, it has also been my least favourite year from storylines’ prespective, since they were almost non-existant most of the time, too.

the main event’s story was just “bryan won a (fake) popularity award. I, john cena, promised him a match. would you, triple h, give it to him vs orton?” and it ignored that bryan had multiple matches vs orton already and having another match against him isn’t really the issue as much as it is to prevent all kinds of screw finishes (I mean, even if orton didn’t purposfully lose via DQ, what was stopping the shield, wyatts, kane, hbk or hhh from ruining the match anyway (since they promised that they “got his back”)?) isn’t that what the whole purpose of the bryan’s story up to now is? or should we just ignore or forget about it all, begin from zero and (possibly) build for a triple threat at the rumble?

Well from Cena’s perspective it actually made sense this time, yes Orton beat Cena and Cena admitted that, but Orton has never beaten Bryan clean. So to actually prove himself as THE GUY he needed to beat the one guy he couldn’t beat for three months clean. I know we’re used to Cena’s bullshit but I feel you’re unfairly categorizing it as non-sensical in a situation where it actually make sense.

And as for the storylines this year, they’re there, its why we got so invested in Summerslam and afterwards, they just botched them. And yeah, in ring product I’d say its honestly the best its ever been in the WWE/F, look back to the overrated 90s, the early 90s comprised of everyone blowing Bret Hart for everything he did (I find his style horribly boring as a face, and think it worked much better as a heel in the late 90’s because the majority of his moves are momentum stopping, and submission releated), but even then you didn’t have a bunch of guys that were really talented being able to do their thing. Perfect’s push got clipped by Hogan, Shawn was busy doing the Rockers thing till 93′, and wasn’t taken seriously as a world title contender ’till late 94.’ Then Owen Hart got straddled in a tag team with Yokozuna (I think) and Bret didn’t have a really hot angle ’till Austin. Most of the 90’s WWF shows involved one really, really good match, that came after a bunch of horrible shit. And the late 90s Attitude period is known for being one of the worst times work-rate wise. You could argue WWE Smackdown 2002-2004 was rad, but really they’d have like one good match a month followed by two month long feuds between Taker/Lesnar, and Big Show.

So yeah, I’m going to say this is the best year for WWE workrate wise, they’ve polished themselves from last year and if Bryan/Punk happened now it would be much better than the match they had a year ago.

I think the WWE is just OCD and feel the need to give Bryan his WM moment. The problem with that is they are hurting their overall product as a result. They could have just as easily done Bryan champion from Summerslam or September until now, have him win the Royal Rumble and win the title at Mania and the storyline would just be compelling.

At this point, there’s no way Bryan will get all of his revenge before ‘Mania.

“My only other complaint is that Bryan wrestled the match and got the crowd reaction, but the announcers spent most of the time talking about how gracious it was of Cena to give him a shot, and then when Bryan got lowblowed Cena jogged out like a concerned dad to stick up for him. Dude’s a wrestler, John, I know he’s shorter than you and all, but he’s fine.”

As I was reading this, I started thinking: what if this is going to turn into an angle? What if Cena is going to keep treating Bryan like a little brother and being unintentionally condescending until Bryan snaps and tells him to leave him the fuck alone cuz he doesn’t need him to win the title? It would be a great way to get people to hate Cena without turning him heel because he just seems like a well-intentioned dude who’s legitimately concerned about Bryan because he still somehow underestimates him. This would be a perfect to create some heat between them since they’re all buddy-buddy now and to build to Cena and Bryan co-winning the Rumble and having an epic WM20-style triple threat match.

I wonder how the Hogan rumors are going to fit into this. Hopefully not at all since I’m tired of old guys stealing the spotlight at Wrestlemania. But if Hogan comes back, my money’s on some kind of tag team with Cena or something safe like that.

you mean re-do cena/bryan’s storyline for summerslam like it didn’t already happen?

also, if hogan comes back and describes bryan the same way he described aries, hardy, bully, hardy again and then styles: “THIS IS THE GUY THAT’S GONNA TAKE THIS BUISNESS TO THE NEXT LEVEL, BROTHER!”, I don’t know how I’ll react…

Sounds great Hobbitcore, but I worry about WWE’s chances of keeping both him and Cena face in that lead-up. Cena’s so popular with kids that the temptation is always there to keep him face no matter what, even when he’s in some kind of wrong, so they turn whoever else. They never allow grey with the dude, which is fine, but why tease it?

and this one will be cena ACTUALLY understimating him and not the same?

I still see it more like the exact same. (only orton getting involved will be the difference. (orton has become as good as he was after summerslam again last night! his promo with renee young was very awesome overall! and even his opening segment promo was nice.))

I really loved how he tried to be all pissed off buts still just COULDN’T help himself from explaining that the “undeserving troll” is, in fact, Daniel Bryan. Surely, we would’ve never found out who he was talking about if he hadn’t told us!

I like how the WWEfannation video cuts out the part where AMBROSE KISSES REIGNS (holy shit). It happened, and now it’s my background for everything. Also I actually liked Tamina yesterday, especially when she threw her jacket and kicked Nikki’s face off. It was satisfying to see her throwing everyone around and not giving a shit, if she was always like that and never did the topple-over-splash then I’d like her.

I know they’re in Texas but we’ve been seeing an awful lot of Shawn Michaels recently. Anyone think that the odds are increasing that he might actually be planning a Wrestlemania comeback match?

WWE’s done a pretty good job so far of not telegraphing what the Wrestlemania card is going to look like. Can’t help but wonder if there might not be some sort of Bryan/Punk “verse” HHH/Michaels thing going on.

punk has been facing several legends for the past manias and stealing the show with them every time so, yes to hbk/punk! and yes to more promos like the one we got last RAW from them (which started good with them making actuall funny jokes for a f*cking change in wwe and messing with the crowd, but then for god knows whatever reason went just nowhere at that moment and didn’t close good.)

I’m watching the show as I reload the Withleather front page, waiting for the B&W to go up. When I saw it finally get posted, I paused at King announcing Punk’s tag team partners. Now I’m SO mad at myself for reading the article first because Brandon shown the main event finish on the first page. But the wrestling funnies! I must have them immediately!

Main reason for not waiting until I’ve watched the entire show was because I was about 88% sure that the match would be a 10-15 minute affair where Orton gets to win clean so he finally establishes himself as a champion and proves he can beat Bryan clean. But, damn, if I knew that the main event was even going to be as remotely epic as it was… I’d just keep my shit together and suffer through B&W withdrawal to witness Mah Boi D-Bry tear the house down once again… without the spoilers! But alas, such was my fate.

Anyway, great stuff once again Brandon, LOVED the Overexplainer vs Jern promo, if that thing played out word-to-word on RAW (well, it almost does every week, but only almost), I’d probably disintegrate from laughing too hard.

I knew that Tamina super kick was legit when they showed them walking up the ramp and Tamina was crying. Anywho, that was a great Raw and great write up per usual. It was a fun two days on the withleather forum, To Brandon and everyone here have a safe, wonderful and faggy holiday.

Interesting that you decided not to touch on the potential HBK/HHH vs. Punk feud going on here, personally I hate it but maybe a lot of people don’t I guess I don’t know.

It seemed to me they were leading towards a Fatal 4 Way for the strap with the four biggest guys but I guess with Bryan it’s just going to be three now. I was very confused as to why if they were going to end the match with a low blow that they didn’t make it a title match? The place would have went wild for any near falls for D-Bry if the strap was on the line.

Once again great great tag team wrestling, I hate HHH as much as the next guy, but if it really is him who is breathing new life into the tag division then I give him a ton of credit.

punk/hbk’s thing was better than it will ever get recognized for, really. serious mastery at controlling the crowd and coming up with clever lines. but it still felt anti-climitic at the end and it’s being burnt very slowly. in fact, I still can’t figure if it’s going hbk/punk or hbk/bryan way!

That was part of what was so UGH about this was that it was obviously making fun of Obama and friends taking a selfie at Mandela’s memorial. You even heard King start to say “There’s a Danish president who…” but he got cut off cuz someone went for a pin.

In the continuing saga of the Bellas learning wrestling by romantic osmosis, Nikki now runs the ropes exactly like Cena. I’m really glad it got caught in the clip of the Diva’s match (at 0:33), because it went by so quick that I’m not sure anyone else caught it, and it had me in such stitches I almost missed Tamina caving her face in.

Did Michael Cole just say Tamina Snuka should have been disqualified for PERFORMING A PERFECTLY LEGIT MOVE THAT WE’VE SEEN GUYS WHO AREN’T “LEGAL” IN A TAG MATCH DO ON “LEGAL” COMPETITORS FOR YEARS NOW?????

By the way, I thought it warranted a specific mention that THE CAMERAS CUT AWAY FROM WRESTLING THAT WAS CURRENTLY HAPPENING to catch a glimpse of these fucking hyenas taking a selfie. The production truck deserves way more blame for how horrible that whole thing was than the announce team does.

So regarding the Divas. We all know that they are building to AJ dropping the title to one of the Total Divas yes? Can it be please Brie with a Yes Lock? I dont know why they havent been having her try to use it, only to have her screw it up a couple times, then have it locked in like a boss when she would finally go over for the title. And since they have been pushing the IRL relationship of Brie and Bryan, it just makes sense to me.

I mean your fiance is DB and AJ is running rough all over the Divas with her submission. Your fiance was involved with AJ at one time and is a submission expert… How does this not write itself?

I mean its not super riveting “SUMMER OF BRIE!” or anything, but I think its a neat little packaged story using existing and recent history that gets the end result they want while still being believable in wrestling context.

I have an everlasting dislike for The Bella Twins, but I’ve been wondering similar things. They keep half-assing Brie’s face turn and push, of which only consists of “is in love with Daniel Bryan”. If that’s all she’s gonna be, use it. Let him tell her in a backstage segment that he believes in her, and have her appropriate his moves and phrases. It probably won’t work, but I’d appreciate a try.

Sorry dude, HHH is just going to keep pushing his boring, indie guys at us. Thank God Vince is still around for a few more years to keep Ryback and Mason Ryan around to keep the show from becoming a total disaster.

To coincide with the new Godzilla movie, Tensai and Brodus should form THE UNNATURAL DISASTERS: Brodus is now a giant, dinosaur-like monster that terrorizes the smaller WWE superstars and Tensai can be…like…Mothra or something.

One of my favourite bits of the show was the referee in Bryan and Orton’s match shouting “DANIEL BYRAN. DO NOT DO THAT.” before Bryan rammed Orton’s leg into the ring post. Like he was D-Bry’s dad, and he was about to throw food at his sister in the back of the car or something. Lovely.

I loved it when the referee asked orton to get bryan in, and orton said “get him in?! *smiles* ok!” and goes for the hanging DDT, and the referee just puts his arms down and rolls his eyes like he’s thinking “oh, f*ck it.”

Haven’t seen any The Dugout in a little while, but I feel safe in speaking for everyone here in saying that occasional Dugout-style chat/promos between wrestlers in the vein of the Orton/Cena one this week would be awesome (and if this has been suggested before, consider this one more vote for it).

Watch as this RAW gets a 2.3 rating or some shit and they blame it on Bryan because he was heavily featured in the main event.

Also, check out the next live RAW, when we have a 30 minute contract signing for a main event in a show littered with crappy filler matches and it gets a better rating because there wasn’t anything else of interest on TV and WWE just goes “WELP, I GUESS THIS WORKS” and we get even more of that (than usual, I mean).

It’s such a simple concept. If not everyone gets their tv time every Raw, the feuds can be prolonged without people being done to death like the current product. It’s partially what makes NXT so successful.

The fact that we see a lot of great booking/writing on NXT makes me hopeful for it to be implemented in some way on RAW in future, but I just don’t think the writing team/Vince/Trips/Steph/whoever the hell is actually in charge of that company right now can hold on to one thing for longer than few weeks, tops. Everything seems to change on the whim, so that’s why I can’t really get myself to believe that they have a set idea on Bryan having a WM moment on XXX or, well, anything else for that matter. Even though they are always working on their “Road to Wrestlemania” several months before the PPV, obviously.

Great matches (almost) all around, but that Real Americans/ World’s Big Strongest Langston match is exactly the shit I love to see: big, impressive people doing impressive things. Also, when Langston trucked Cesaro before the swing, I felt my head hurt from the impact.

I would be on board with Tamina never doing her horrible splash ever again and using the superkick as a finisher. I would also be on board with that kick knocking some primal instinct lose in Nikki’s brain and she goes hardcore training mode and becomes the best diva using the Michinoku Driver or something. Next time on Total Divas, John tells her they’re going to brunch and she tells him to shut up and goes back to slamming her shins into a concrete pole.

Two questions: 1) Doesn’t Orton kind of break kayfabe by doing something with his free arm in a face-down submission move besides waving it in pain? 2) Why was Cena carrying a second one of his own t-shirts to the ring? Was he fulfilling WWE.com orders backstage, saw Bryan get low-blowed & just came charging right out?

What impressed me what even after the kick to the face Nikki remembered to get in position for AJs Shining Wizard. Which means Nikki > Original Sin Cara…

It seems once they got serious boyfriends in wrestling they decided to actually learn their trade, and hopefully Tamina gets of with a warning. It looks like Nikki took a step forward to stabilize the weight of AJ. And if the picture on Instagram from yesterday is to be believed she wasn’t seriously injured..