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With ninjas like these, who needs enemas?

It’s not often I can feel the joy that comes from knowing that I have managed to include both the words ‘ninja’ and’enema’ in your RSS feedreader.

That makes me happy, right there.

And I simply cannot wait to see the search terms people used to find this blog post on Google.

Do you remember a while back, I posted about our experiences having our Karazhan Chess Event ninja’ed by another guild?

The original post is right here, where I describe the entire situation, of the raid going into the second night of Karazhan, only to find an endless mound of corpses in front of Illhoofs’ chamber where they utterly failed to down him, but when reaching the Chess event, found it to have been completed and the box looted already. And the events that led to finding and confirming, from the GM ‘Thesphinx’s own mouth, that yes it was Green Dragonflight that was responsible. Hell, Thesphinx was proud of it, and was happy that we were all riled up about it. He took obvious, genuine pleasure in it.

Go ahead and read the old post, it’s been a while, it’s cool.

We eventually figured out who in the guild was responsible, when the person Hakuri/Ikurah left the guild to join Green Dragonflight a week later. That got rolled into a bunch of drama with some problems with what I thought was one of my best friends in game leaving our guild on bad terms, so it was all a big ugly mess.

But the facts remain. we had a Karazhan run that ended halfway in, and on the second run found the Chess Event loot box empty and the event finished, and identified Green Dragonflight as the guild that was responsible, and our Raid Leader talked with Green Dragonflight’s GM, Thesphinx, who not only admitted it, but bragged about it, laughed about it, and taunted Jopps by telling him he’d never figure out who in our guild had given them our Raid ID.

For the next week, in fact, until Ikurah left to join GD, at periodic times Joppers would tell us that Thesphinx had just whispered him to ask “Didja figure out who it was yet? lol”.

Fast forward to today. My wife asked “What the heck is this Official WoW forums you keep mentioning as being where the asshats live?”

I’m Thesphinx, the GL of Green Dragonflight, and I’ve been kicked out of 14 different raiding guilds, all for different reasons. Let me explain.

I love to raid. I play WoW about six hours a day, so I could easily join one of those hardcore raiding guilds that require you to fill an application to join and raid at least three times a day if I wanted to. But I don’t, because I refuse to join any guild that requires you to fill out an application and go to interviews to PLAY A GAME.

In my opinion, guilds are just an extra feature Blizzard added to make finding groups for raids easier. But for some reason guilds are making things too difficult! Always I hear about how guilds make things mandatory and how all the guildies are told to “treat each other like they would their own families.” IT’S A GAME! And it should be played like a game! You should be able to get on whenever you want, get off whenever you want, and only have to raid when you want. You shouldn’t get kicked out for not being social or active! Instead, while you’re in a guild you’re always in constant fear while away from your computer that something is happening that will undermine you while you’re not on. Sometimes, I don’t feel like playing WoW, and when I don’t feel like it, I won’t. I refuse to let myself get kicked out of guilds and bossed around because I’m not perfect. I paid for the game to have fun, and I want to have fun. The last thing I need is to be paying 15 dollars a month to make WoW my second job.

Anyways, as for why I got kicked out of fourteen raiding guilds, let’s just say, when you refuse to sign up for raids on a website, refuse to come to raids you don’t want to, refuse to give free things to guildies, and refuse to accept free things from guildies, you become a social outcast. And when you become a social outcast, you get booted, always with the same message: “You do not meet the required standards for the guild” or “You do not fit in well with the other players” depending on whether it is a family raiding guild or a “casual” raiding guild that you’re in.

So I started my own guild, because that way I could have things done the way they’re supposed to be, where guilds do what they’re supposed to do, make finding groups for raids and instances easier rather than making WoW a second job.

Well, that was one year ago, and now, the guild is doing fairly well. 120 members, all of which are over 60, thirty 70s, and six people who raid kara regularly every week.

However, I’ve been having trouble inviting members lately. It’s sad too, because the guild is so close to raiding on its own.

If you’re interested in joining Green Dragonflight, whisper Thesphinx when I’m on or any other member, since everyone has the power to invite. All raiding is completely optional, and no DKP so that you don’t have to come to raids you don’t want to. Also, helping guildies you don’t know isn’t encouraged with the exception obviously being that they’re your friends. Also, ranks are not determined by how often you are on/how often you help the guild so you don’t have to be obligated to do anything you don’t want to and won’t be put on “second tier” for not being on often enough. You can literally just get on once a week to raid and then not come back on for another week. In fact, all you have to do is raid EVENTUALLY, and even if you don’t, you won’t be booted or demoted.

I really appreciate anyone who decides to join the guild. Even if just four people decide to join, that would help us out a lot so that we won’t have to run with other guilds or PuG so much. Even if you already have a guild or can’t join for some reason, whisper Thesphinx at 7:30 game time Saturday or Sunday at 5:45 game time to come to kara runs.

Once again, I really appreciate it.

Now, I posted the whole thing here because he could edit or delete it at any time… but when I read that, I laughed… and laughed… and laughed…

I’m serious. I didn’t write that as a joke. It’s no longer April First. That is serious.

That guy wrote a very well framed post. A lot of thought and hard work went into justifying his decisions, and if you did not know… I mean, KNOW, as I do, about the nasty things he has done to other people in the game, with JOY!, in the past, you could almost buy into the concept that this guy is really just a smart, nice guy that doesn’t want to be tied down to the fascist rules of unreasonable guild officers that take a simple game way too seriously.

Ummm… no.

He’s an asshat. A ninja that takes pride in hurting other people casually, an asshat that simply doesn’t think any of the rest of you are REAL, or could possibly be worth a seconds’ thought. He wants phat loot, and needs more people to carry him into raids to get phat loot, and he will say what he thinks will get him more people to get HIM what he wants. A person that has proven he enjoys doing things that he knows would hurt other people or waste their time. He has made that plain in the past. As he says… WoW is a game, and he is playing it for fun. What he neglects to mention are the things he thinks are fun.

Even worse, he is an asshat with a guild leader position.

I’ve said before, I am sure some of the members of the Green Dragonflight guild have no idea what he and a few of his tight buddies do.

But take a minute and try and imagine… suppose you saw that post of his in the forums, and said to yourself, “Hey, this guy sounds pretty smart, and the reasons he formed his guild sound solid. I kinda wanted more structure, but it sounds like he is smart and I agree that those other raiding guilds sure do have a lot of rules. A guild that raids without rules sure sounds cool. I want to be able to take a night off to spend time with my son or daughter without worrying about being gkicked. I think I’ll whisper him.”

And imagine you went and joined that guild. And started walking around with the <Green Dragonflight> tag over your characters’ head.

You would have no idea what I, and lots of other people like me on our server, automatically thought of you.

Because you are in that guild.

For one thing, I would never PUG with you, and neither would anyone else from my guild. Why deal with the annoyance of having known ninjas in the group?

Is that fair? Are you a ninja?

No, you’re not. But your guild has a well deserved reputation, because the Guild Leader forms the heart of the guild, for better or worse. When he is known to be a worthless sack of shit… well, it’s not fair, but the brush you are being tarred with is the same one.

Say you call out you would like some help in Netherstorm on the general channel. I often help when i see those, and so do others. But I do a /who of your name, see you’re in Green Dragonflight, and I put you on ignore so your bleating no longer annoys me.

What must it be like to actually be in that guild? Are normal members given access to the guild bank, or just Thesphinx and Kaziral and his tight friends? Are members there feeding the GL’s ninja desires by just putting stuff for free in their bank, thinking they may someday get some help themselves when the time comes?

I mean, having someone that screwed up as your Guild Leader? Seriously?

Yeah, that’s where I want to try and make a home for my characters in the game.

If you have time, and you personally have knowledge of what Thesphinx has done to you or your guild in the past on Kael’thas, why not stop by that thread and post your experiences there, to make sure anyone that reads it is warned of what he is like. Kinda like a public service for players everywhere.

Ninja situation alert!

As long as we are on the topic of ninjas and asshats and people screwing guilds over, I want to alert you to a plague that has struck on some realms over the last week. I am tired right now, and can’t remember where I first saw it mentioned, but when I do remember I’ll edit this post to show it.

There is a new scam people are doing. They look up a guild in the Armory, and write down the names of the officers. Armory shows the various ranks of the players, so it’s easy to find out.

Then the person waits until it’s either really early or really late, when the number of people on the game in that guild are very low, but there IS someone that is of a rank that could invite people to the guild AND upgrade their character rank. WoW does have search functions to show you all the members of a particular guild that are online, so it’s easy to do this.

Then the person makes an alt named “officername-bagboy” or something else alt sounding, whispers the online officer of the targeted guild, and says they are a new bank alt of the officer, could you shoot me a quick invite?

More often than not, they seem to not only get an invite, but automatically get promoted to a level that has access to the guilds’ bank.

Then they loot the entire bank, delete their alt and disappear.

Please, if you are whispered to invite the alt of an officer into your guild, do so… but if the person really is an officer, let them promote their own damned alt.

DO NOT DO IT YOURSELF.

If they are who they say they are, all they have to do is log out the alt, log in the officer main, and promote. They do not need you to do so. If they can’t promote their alt, then you KNOW they are liars.

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20 thoughts on “With ninjas like these, who needs enemas?”

I’m upset. I’ve been searching Google for Ninja Enemas and you’re friggin’ blog entry popped up. Useless! No information on ninjas OR enemas, much less the happy combination that exists when they are placed together!! I’m submitting your page to have your site removed from those keywords!!

I absolutely agree. I don’t think people realize what a guild tag above your head can do to your reputation. A friend of mine, a holy paladin in a guild I used to be in, was in a pug the other day and the healer (pally was tanking) sad “Eh, …” “What?” he asked. “I’ve had some really bad experiences with and in that guild.”

Problem is, they’re never dealt with. The guy who gets the bad rep because of a couple members of his guild tries to do something about it, but nothing but a slap on the wrist is ever given.

Oddly enough, I started seeing more and more recruitment messages from guilds that pretty much state the whole ‘you dont have to do anything if you dont want to’ and invite people to join them.

I am not sure I would want to be in such a guild. Sounds there would be a bunch of selfish, inconsiderate, anti-social players in a guild like that. Guess that is the ultimate casual guild — nobody cares about absolutely anything or anybody.

Watch it dude, he may sue you for Defamation of Character Character. ROFLMAO

We’ve recently been victim of a loot-ninja. Now, here’s the kicker. We required that you raid for 2 weeks straight without getting added to the SKG list for gear distribution. After that, you are on the list, but suicided, meaning you start at the bottom. Well, if an item is passed on, then the recruits/new members get a crack at it. Well, this caulksocker pre-scanned our Armory stats for his class, saw what people had and pre-meditatedly planned for certain gear items knowing that no one else would SKG/suicide for it. – As much as I would like to give them credit for being a calculated criminal, I would love to walk into their house and smash their faces into their monitor until it looks like roadkill.

Suffice to say, he got what he wanted and used it as a ticket into the top raiding guild on the server. 2 weeks later, he got booted for unknown reasons… It may have had something to do with me knowing their GM and having a nice heart-to-heart with them. **evil grin**

I have now gottten him blacklisted from the to 5 guilds on the server. MUWAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Your ninja alert thing, there at the end? I know I saw it a while ago on Livejournal’s WoW community. I posted it up as news to my guild full of gullible, alt-happy friends who love to get guild invites for their latest nubalt-du-jour. ;)

And yeah…. your raid ID ninja drama? BEEPIN’ BEEP BEEP MOTHERBEEPERS WITH THEIR BEEPS SO FAR UP THEIR BEEPIN’ BEEPHOLES THAT THEY CAN SEE THEIR BEEPIN’ BEEPERS BEEPIN’! >_< People who are posers and users and honorless dogs in the game burn mah britches. I’m sorry you had to deal with it. May they all get keylogged and farmer-raeped in the morning.

Long-time reader, new poster. I recall very well the drama from before, and this is just too funny. I loved his post on the Official Forums, and a couple things made me laugh out loud.

1. 15-yr old, playing WOW for two years, and saying that WOW had the potential to be like a second job? What’s his first job? You can’t seriously tell me that you know what job really is when you’re 15. Ha!

2. Check out his armory link: http://www.wowarmory.com/character-sheet.xml?r=Kael'thas&n=Thesphinx. Please tell me that any of that loot is the result of being a member of 14 hardcore raiding guilds. I beg of you. Nothing he is wearing (at the time I looked) came from anything past Moroes. Except one thing: the Girdle of Treachery. From where, you ask? Chess Event. Wonder how many times he’s seen that…

And new guildies wonder why we make it a big deal if they say stupid-offensive things in public chat channels. /sigh People have no idea how badly they can screw their guild’s reputation over just by being an idiot one day.

Well, at least that traitorous scum is out of your guild, and hopefully not seeing much past Chess, if he can even get there.

Dammerung – Your best bet is the official WoW sites. There are a lot of defamation posts about people who ninja loot, ninja members and assassinate guilds. The real problem is, not enough people speak up when this happens. Unfortunately, Blizzard will forever remain neutral on this subject because the asshat’s $15/month is just as powerful as your $15/month. Capice?

So by all means, be vocal about it. Post on the WoW forums. Post on Allakhazam. Post on other public WoW forums. Spread the word.

Loong post, BBB. Couldn’t get through the whole thing, so I just read the Guild advertisement. It sounds like a great Guild! I wonder if Thesphinx is taking server transfers? I’ll have to whisper him and find out…

How bout this for a ninja story: My brother was getting an enchant done to his Two handed weapon, it was an expensive enchant around 400g or so and found an enchanter to do it for him, a priest. He traded the mats and waited patiently for the priest to perform the enchant only to have him queue up for a battleground and then instantly log off. He stayed logged off for a week. My brother found his guild and contacted an officer who found out that the priest had been bragging about it to the other guildies. He put in a GM ticket right after his mats were stolen and got his mats back two weeks later. And when you think about it, there is no way to protect yourself from someone jacking your mats. So now unless I know the person I’m constantly hitting up the armory to verify professions.

Seems that Thesphinx is a real sphinxter. Said person clearly has no idea what “guild” means: “an organization of persons with related interests, goals, etc., esp. one formed for mutual aid or protection.”
The very nature of a guild is group-oriented otherwise what is there to distinguish a guild from a mob? Anyway, I am more concerned about people like this not so much in-game as in real-life. I firmly believe how you do anything is how you do everything. This little jewel of humanity seems to have a LONG way to go before he/she has a hint that they are not the center of the universe.

PS — Semper Fi, BBB, from one former Jarheaded Leatherneck to another.

As an officer I am asked constantly to invite alts for members, even for other officers, but I will never invite someone claiming to be a member. We have a policy that if you want an alt invite to the guild, fine, but you MUST log you main first and make a formal request. I’ve made the GM do it. I make no exceptions.

I don’t care so much about not inviting member alts, since our members don’t have full bank access, and so they can’t really do much harm. However, officers are the ones I take precaution with. They get invited, promoted to Member Alt, and told, “Promote yourself farther.” Never had an issue.

You say that guild post is smart? I read it.. thought about it for a couple seconds.. then read between the lines, If you look there you’ll realize its a guild with no goals, no ambitions, people won’t help you do anything, you will never clear kara, you will never see the inside of zul aman never mind gruuls. You will be stuck in heroic/badge loot til Wotlk.

The plus side of all that is you get to act like you have no guild. But have a guild name above your head ;)

If he had said he had LEFT 14 guilds… i would take him more seriously… but instead he got KICKED from 14 guilds. Why would I want someone like that as my guild leader 0o

I dont have any of these worries. The venture Co. Alliance side has 3 main guilds that raid. Thats it 3. One everyone but the guild leader wants me in for some reason. The other gets things done by pure persistance.. horrible though. The other is full of people like the post above. I’m on my own needless to say :p

I must say I would honestly be fooled by this advertisement if there was no warning. He hits so many right cords with casual player that its almost scary. When I started WoW (very late, 6 months ago) I met ninjas right at the beggining of the game, in DM and Stock. Luckily I also met couple of people around lvl 25 that helped me and explained things to me. One of them was priest that was in hardcore raiding guild, but I met her while she was playing her twink alt. Later on she offered me entry into this guild, but also started explaining to me what I need to do, dkp, key to kara, raiding from-to, presence and so on, I really didnt, and still dont feel like doing. I DO work, and I REALLY dont need a second job, unlike sphinxter. I want to have fun with people and nice RP experience. For me loot is just a bunch of pixels and if I win The sword of OMFG PWNING Everything That Walks, I really dont think its a real item that I can put on the wall in my living room. Having fun is what it matters, and casual player lately becomes more and more strained between no-play and hardcore. This little bastard obviously found that weakness and tries to exploit it, which makes it even more dangerous: if he succeds, there is no telling when will this be expanded to other realms, just like ninja-alt disease…