I'm expecting my second baby (a boy!) due 5/30, and wondering if anyone has any suggestions of things that are especially important with baby number 2. Baby number 1 will be turning 2 the week baby is due. Here are a few of my thought that I'd love to have input (other than that from my Mom and mother in law....!)

1) My daughter is still in a crib and sleeps beautifully, with no efforts to climb out... Am I crazy to leave her in her crib and fuss with moving her to a big bed once baby transitions to the crib from the bassinet/co-sleeper? Babies will be sharing a room (probably) for some amount of time at least once new baby moves out of mom and dad's room...

2) Is it asking for trouble to try and start potty training my 20 month old now? She tells us when she goes poo, but that's about all. She is very verbal, and I think she *could* do it, I just don't know that it's worth it to try really hard now to have setbacks on down the road...

3) Any gear suggestions that were lifesavers for baby number 2 (or subsequent ones)? I have already picked up a double stroller (Baby Jogger City Mini from Craigslist), and have plenty of newborn boy clothes and diapers... working on a few more covers for the newbie... but diapering is nearly "under control" I think.

Congrats! My oldest was 3 when the middle one was born so not quite the same age difference but heres what I would suggest based on your questions. Yes, definitely leave your LO in a crib as long as she is doing fine in it. Kids cannot understand boundaries until they are closer to three so you may have a tough time keeping her in bed if you move her sooner. As far as potty training, I'm of the camp that doesn't try to rush it. ODD showed ALL the signs of being ready to potty train at 19 months so we went with it and it was a big horrible, stressful mess for all of us. It really was an awful experience and she seemed 100% ready. About 9 months later she really was ready and we let her lead instead. It was a smooth transition. I would say get a good comfy baby carrier as you will probably be wearing the baby a lot so you can tend to your 2 year old. Good luck! Mine will be only 2 years apart this time and I'm nervous!

Thanks, I appreciate the input. We're sort of of the "leave her in the crib" as long as we can, too... and if that means having 2 cribs for a time--so be it! Family thinks I'm crazy, but if she's doing well, i don't see any reason to move her out. We figure we'll try to start potty training once she's 2 and a half or something. I'll be home for the summer with new baby, so *hopefully* there will be ample opportunity to get that down. Good luck to you on your 2 year spread, also. :-)

DD turned 2 two months after I had DS. I wouldn't bother with moving her to another bed if she's doing well in her crib. I also wouldn't worry about potty training because she's going to have set backs most likely and you won't be in a position to deal with them with a newborn. As far as gear a baby carrier. I had a ring sling and it was a lifesaver when ds was small. I could tote him around handsfree and he could nurse while in there. I wore that sucker all over the house for months! I actually didn't have a double stroller though. DD was very good about listening and holding hands even at that age. I let her walk and she would hold my hand or pocket. I did have a little backpack leash thing though that I kept on her just in case. The double strollers were just so large that I didn't want to fight with it and for what we do I never really used a stroller at all with either of them.

I can't think of any other gear really that I got just for having #2. If you're just looking for suggestions to prepare though I'd also work on putting up some freezer meals and try to make sure grocery shopping is done before baby comes including getting easy ready to eat snacks and juices. When I had ds, dh (or me when I got time) would fill up a few sippies for dd and make her an easy finger food lunch to stick in the fridge. I also had a bowl full of snacks near me. When she needed something she could open the fridge to grab her lunch or sippy and snacks were in my arms reach so she didn't have to wait long if I was in the middle of something. It really helped for us especially since I had some pain the first week or so from tears.

I also set up a 'nursing station' by the couch. The bassinet was there with the diapering stuff and extra clothes and such, my boppy was beside the couch and I had a basket full of bottled water and ready made snacks. It made it so easy to keep hydrated and not starve when I had easy access to water and snacks plus all the baby stuff was in one spot where I could still keep a close eye on dd. I did keep some of her stuff next to the couch as well in case I needed to change her or so we had games/stuff to play when we had time. Good luck!

Oh and you may not want to do this but... I also bought disposable plates, cups, utensils, paper towels, etc. and also disposable diapers and wipes (even though we CD) for the first couple of weeks. We don't normally buy or use those items but it was worth it to me for the first couple of postpartum weeks. It lowered the amount of laundry that needed to be done and kept from having dishes. I had enough to do! And really so did dh with working ft and picking up the slack at the house. I tried to find ways to cut household chores and such as much as possible to make getting through the first 2-4 wks easier.

My DD1 was 28 months when DD2 was born. We moved her out of her crib into a big girl bed just before her second b-day to get ready for baby. She did well with the transition and we haven't looked back. We also did manage to potty train her (daytime) before baby was born. That said, it was summer and a lot easier to PT with less clothing to wet

I would say that some things we did to make life easier were:

Set up plastic shoe box bins of new, and entertaining things for you DD1 to do while you are feeding the baby or busy with baby. For example, pony beads and pipecleaners to string them on. A cutting bin with foam sheets and scissors. A sticker bin, with paper to sticker on. A stamp bin. A colouring bin......you get the idea. I would pull one out when things got tough and DD1 could be amused for a while with something quiet.

Set up a basket of changing materials near your TV room or playroom. Keep a little of everything in it so you wont need to run to baby's room all the time for changes.

Prepare frozen meals that are easy to pull out and reheat.

And the BEST thing I bought was a MOby wrap to carry the baby in so I could still have hands to do puzzles with DD1 or cook dinner or what have you. I also could nurse in it while playing with DD1 (after a few months practice LOL)

Oh and you may not want to do this but... I also bought disposable plates, cups, utensils, paper towels, etc. and also disposable diapers and wipes (even though we CD) for the first couple of weeks. We don't normally buy or use those items but it was worth it to me for the first couple of postpartum weeks. It lowered the amount of laundry that needed to be done and kept from having dishes. I had enough to do! And really so did dh with working ft and picking up the slack at the house. I tried to find ways to cut household chores and such as much as possible to make getting through the first 2-4 wks easier.

Oh my goodness! This was the best after YDD was born! We aren't big on disposable items either but a friend brough us a bunch of paper plates, cups, etc. and it was the most unbelievable relief to not have to do dishes every night. I would HIGHLY suggest this too! I'd say it really takes 3-4 weeks to adjust. Even if you are feeling good it is a huge change to go from one to two. Cut corners where you can.

When we had our second our first was 21 months. We bought a second crib and never regretted it...very useful since our family just kept growing :-). After potty training 4 children...I believe 2 1/2 is a "magic age". Yes...every child is different but boy that age seems about perfect...old enough to have control yet young enough that they don't "use" it.

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Mama to DD 10, DD 8, DS 7, DS 5, and identical twin almost 1 year old girls born at 26 1/2 weeks and doing super! Thanking God every day for our blessings!!!

When we had our second our first was 21 months. We bought a second crib and never regretted it...very useful since our family just kept growing :-). After potty training 4 children...I believe 2 1/2 is a "magic age". Yes...every child is different but boy that age seems about perfect...old enough to have control yet young enough that they don't "use" it.

Maybe I should send my 2 1/2 year old to you because he won't have any of it. He's totally ready but stubborn.

Mine will be almost exactly 3 years apart but fortunately my son has been out of a crib for a while! I'd say don't push to get her out of the crib now. My son slept in a bassinet for 3 months when he was a baby so you can always do that with the little baby.

My DS will be 2 the week before this one is due! lol
I wouldn't move your DD. If she's sleeping well, and you know that you will have baby with you for a few months, I wouldn't interrupt that pattern.
I would also say to wait on PL'ing. My DS will "pretend" to pee like his daddy, or tell me he's pooped sometimes. Sometimes he'll sit on the potty; but it's still like a "game" to him. No doubt if I *could get him PL'ed before his brother is born he'd regress, so I'm going to give that one time.
My friend suggested to me the same as PPs, to have easy lunches/healthy snacks w/in reach whenever you nurse/feed the babe so that you won't have to get up. I planned on having a basket of diapers and clothes in the living room, and a swing.
I bought DS a new toy It's a toy Target carried and now discontinued *can find on ebay called Play My Way it has 4 diff bins (I only have 3) of activities, like a kitchen, workshop, and nursery. I'm hoping he'll start using it more, and it'll keep him busy when the baby arrives.
I also have a few crafty things set aside for him. (milk paint; evaporated milk w/food coloring, so if he eats it, it's ok. Same thing w/Jello and some water~ Since he still tries to eat a lot of things. lol. I will make some edible playdough as well.)
If your LO can handle it, a water table is an awesome thing. I would, but we live in an apartment and DS makes a HUGE mess. Sometimes I'll stick him on the floor w/a bin w/some water and toys in a diaper. he LOVES it. It's ok; if I have time to mop afterwards.
Baby carriers!! I HAVE to be hands free to chase after DS.
I have a sling (will be perfect for nursing in the first few weeks) I'm going to be getting a Moby, and I have a Beco, which DS Lived in for 2 weeks when he was going through "something" unknown and wouldn't calm any other way.