Hezbollah Stockpiling Advanced Thoughts And Prayers To Use Against Israel

“Thoughts and prayers are the most common countermeasures to bullets, explosives, or automotive impact.”

Beirut, November 9 – Observers of Middle East arms movements have noticed an ongoing effort by the Shiite militia Hezbollah in Lebanon to augment its arsenal with thoughts and prayers, an article in Jane’s reports.

In addition to Iran-supplied missiles and munitions, the article claims, the movement that effectively controls Lebanon has spent the last several years pursuing an overhaul of its thoughts and prayers inventory to bring the stockpile up do date with the latest versions of thoughts and prayers. State-of-the-art thoughts and prayers have attracted increasing attention during that time as they are deployed again and again to counter shooting attacks and other massacres across the US, and Hezbollah seeks to avail itself of the relatively inexpensive technology.

“Thoughts and prayers are the most common countermeasures to bullets, explosives, or automotive impact,” the article quotes analyst Wil Wheaton as saying. “You can see American output of thoughts and prayers spike in the aftermath of various attacks, as efforts are made to mitigate the damage of an attack and to prevent further such violence. Hezbollah, evidently, has witnessed that development and seeks whatever small advantage it can get against Israel’s military might in any future war.”

Not every expert agrees Hezbollah would be able to wield thoughts and prayers to its advantage, the article notes. “Israel and its supporters have had a robust thoughts and prayers network in place for decades,” it reports. The article then cites multiple analysts who contend that moreover, the thoughts and prayers of hundreds of millions of Muslims, five times per day, have so far failed to affect Israel’s superiority. “In fact as the thoughts and prayers of Muslims have grown more numerous with the increase in Muslim populations since 1948, Israel has grown steadily more powerful, calling into question the capacity of Israel’s Muslim enemies to deploy thoughts and prayers with any effectiveness,” Jane’s writes.

To be sure, the article continues, Hezbollah has not abandoned its other, proven avenues for fighting Israel. “Human shields remain a cornerstone of Hezbollah defensive strategy,” observes the article. “In addition, the organization has recruited teams of Photoshop experts and activists skilled in the recaptioning of images from other conflicts for purposes of slandering Israel for committing atrocities. Along with an uncritical international press corps and support from the brutal dictatorial regimes populating the UN Human Rights Council, those measures will still form the bulk of Hezbollah’s resources in any conflict with Israel.”