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Yes, I saw Auntie's post and thought that was a wave of the wing to all of us that our hen house is providing good shelter, cackling and more.

No one is hen pecked here, they are only hen penned!

Although some, okay one, of the hens is being pecke*** as of late. You may have noticed the roosters aren't even bothering to crow because some people are getting up so late IN THE DAY it doesn't matter.

Well, to you free range hens, I note there's nothing like a fresh post to scratch about with your chicken legs!

Here we go, on the next journey of our online diary cause to me, it is kinda what it feels like. I get to name part 5 and I think Aunt Doxie would be honored that you chose his words to name this one. I didn't even know he peeked in here but it does seem like we are getting a bit popular...

It has been raining the past few days here. Usually when that happens I sleep in late and has no motivation to do anything. I guess me and Moonlight was on the same schedule because I got up around 2ish as well. I almost missed Passions. Nothing really going on with me. I have been monitoring my sugar kinda close lately. Today upon waking it was 116...after taking pills and about 4 hours later it was 88, that's the best one yet and quite a rebound from yesterday. Hey Moonlight, how often should you check your sugar? I don't want to be doing it too often but I usually check every 4 hours depending on when I take my medicine and what I have eaten. Middle finger looks like a pin cushion now...

I am off to finish watching wrestling and then it is back to playing Wedding Dash. Tomorrow may just be a stressful day but won't say anything til I come back from appointment. Have a good night, ladies.

Queen- You watch Passions, eh? Do you ever watch Days of Our Lives? I watch that one once in awhile, especially now that Stefano's back on.

Stefano coming back is what made me start watching again. I'm trying to see how far they are going to go with the DiMeras vs the Bradys thing is going to last. I am a bit pissy that they are moving Passions to Directtv which to me should be called Direct Ripoff. I hate them.

I am an "All My Children" fan myself. I tuned back in years ago, when Haley and Mateo were having their big wedding. Lots of hunks on that soap these days!

OK, so its crazy late but I had to post. I am on the "phone with Stone" earlier tonight, and I get an email from the dreaded HUMPER. Its so funny, I am gonna post it here in a sec. Remember, he sent me the "wine and dine, dressed to the nines" email, and then I declined and asked him to slow down. He proceeded to say the "wine and dine" was just a "test" to get me to say what I really felt. Keep in mind this was 2 days after our date, and he wanted true feelings? Slow the fuck down already....So, he left off in the last email saying he wouldn't contact me, I could call or email, it was totally up to me. (Yeah, like I'm missing out or something over here. I have Stone.......).

Here's the latest Humper email from Monday night here (LMAO):

Cindy,

What's up...I know I was some what of a prick,with my last email ! That does not mean that I don't enjoy talking with you, because I do...You are a great listener,and I enjoy your conversation ! I know that you are seeing other guy's....I do not have a problem with that ! I'm just looking for a sweet chick to spend some time with. I'm not looking for a girlfriend, as at this point in my life ...I'm happy being a singe man ! Butt (yes, he spelled it with 2 t's, lol) I am a piece of shit male...perhaps I was being so aggressive with you, so maybe I could speed up the process of getting in your pants ! I'm just being honest, So write me back we can just talk, and I will not ask you out, or bug you. I will leave the ball totally in your court, I'm open game! Gosh I hope I have not over stepped my boundaries !!! So if you are awake,and at your computer, I will be up for awhile... you can call,or write...Thats up to you !!! Talk soon

Um....YEAH.....RIGHT! THAT has got to be the dumbest email I have EVER received! "Speed up the process of getting in (my) pants?' ? Like it was ever going to be an option? All I did was hug the guy goodnight and he was shaking like a leaf! So, after I get the email, about 10 minutes goes by and my phone rings. Humper leaves an email, in his very coolest Humper voice...."Hi. You know who this is. You know my number. Call me."

I am sitting here in bewilderment that this guy doesn't even realize what a dumbshit he looks like. I felt sorry for him last week, and thought I was rid of him after I didn't reply to the last email or phone call. Goes to show he was obsessing about me all weekend, and emailed AND called me, when he said he wasn't going to. This is like trying to explain geometry to a first grader. I wouldn't even know where to start, if I were to talk to this guy and tell him what a stupid shit he is. LOL I am laughing my ass off. I think I have sunseeker's humper beat, ne c'est pas? LOL

Ohon a side note, I had mentioned previously that when I went to Stone's Sunday night, I had said he had the Metal ("Arena Rock") channel on "just for me." A very old metal tune came on, from c. 1982 or so. It was by a band called Rainbow and the song was called "Stone Cold." Freaked me out. I haven't heard it in 20 years!

Well, it looks like Moon is moving right along with Stone Cold. I am glad someone is. My dating life is the name. Till texting with Cop 1 & 2 and when I was out dancing with the girls on Sunday night met a guy that looks like Cop #1. I guess it is true we all have a twin out there some where.

Last night went out with my friend Sara and we met our friends for a soft ball game then drinks afterwards. My Sara is becoming very chummy with this guy who we will call J and I got to hang out with him a lot last night. He is a really nice guy and found myself being jealous that Sara got a good night kiss and I did not. J said he has this friend that he thinks I will be perfect for and wanted the 4 of us to go out. I am just not sure if I want to do that since I may have to tell this guy about my status if things were to progress that way. Not sure if I want to do that since I am afraid it might get out to the circle of friends that I hang out with who don't know.

Well, I found out that Dillion Ray West is a big SCAMMER. Not sure if you guys remember but I thought he was either a SCAMMER or my Ex-boyfriend being a jerk. Well last night he showed his true colors. I saw him online and asked his how he was and he said he was not good since he has Malaria and can't afford the medicine since he is broke. So I played along and told him I was sorry and I am sure he could ask for help from friends or family and he told me that his parents died when he was 25 and it would be so nice if he had a nice girl like me to come home to. Well, I stopped it there and told him good luck with getting his treatments and when he got the clue that I would not help him he started getting mad. I told him he was a scammer and he would find someone else to fall for his games. He then said he never asked me for money and hurried up and got off line. I am going to turn him in to Poz.

OK well, off to lay out by the pool, can't wait to hear about the next page in everyone's lives. Bye for now.

Yes, that is the usual "scammer drill," the woe-is-me line.....I only wish I had the strength and energy to string one of those litte shits along--all the way to Western Union. They would just be there, waiting for their money to be wired, LMAO! They get so desperate when you call them out on scamming, lol! Its a riot!

Don't be worried too much about dating new people IF you can pace yourself. IF you have the willpower and the control to take things slow, then you might have some good times. Emotionally, it can be very difficult, I know. I was doing that with a few men I had met this year, taking things very slow while I tried to figure out how I would disclose to them. Good ole Jay and Doc never had a clue. It IS tough disclosing to a neggie, that's all I have done since '96, but its so nice to have Stone around now. I can see what Queen means by saying it makes things so much easier.

I woke up crazy-late today at 330pm, after an emotional night. I started a new thread which most of you have seen. Today marks the 11th anniversary since my late husband David died. Its been very emotional this year, because for the first time, I have people I can turn to who truly understand. The warmth and compassion from all of you is JUST what I needed today! I love all of my sisters here SO much! Don't think I haven't been taking notes, I think a good 5 or 6 of us live pretty close together here on the east coast. I would love for us all to meet sometime. I wonder where the AMG meeting will be next year? I have read that in 2005 it was Nashville, 2006 it was Montreal, and now 2007 its San Fran. Wouldn't it be great if it came back to the east coast next year? We'd have to fly a few of you in, but we could ALL stay at my house, lol! Since I have no furniture, there would be plenty of room, lol!

OK, I am puffed up like a blowfish under my eyes, and Queen, I don't have any cucumbers. I am going to make a grilled cheese sandwich and have some chicken noodle while I watch AMC, which I record every day. Haven't heard from Stone, but I am giving him some space since I have totally wrecked his sleep schedule for the past 9 days, on the phone and otherwise.....

i am still away in london.... ML i didn't read your post from today yet, but will in a minute. big thumbs up, told-you-so congratulations on getting with Stone!!! very very happy to hear that. hugs to everyone, got some catching up to do

Logged

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

Of course, there was an email waiting for me when I woke up today. The subject line said "Wow" and I immediately thought to myself, when I read this email from Humper, I just KNOW he is REALLY going to piss me off.... So, without further adieu.....

"Cindy, So I guess you are really pissed at me now, I figured you would laugh your ass off at that! I guess not. Brian "

Goodness, boys and girls, he WAITED all day until 315pm to email me. In light of recent events where he is concerned, that right there shows some RESTRAINT on his part, LMAO! (Someone shoot me, please.....)

Well, I woke up after a night full of boo-hooing over my late husband to read this shit from Humper? I promptly and most "properly" replied......

"Today is the day that my husband died, so would you grow up and leave me the FUCK ALONE already? I don't have time for your immature games."

If he does this shit anymore (I give him a few days or so.....) I'm gonna sick Stone on his skinny ass. Actually, I could just go by my Dad's shop for a "visit" with my new man and the news of The Incredible Hulk by my side would get back to Stringbean, as my mom calls him. Sorry for venting about such a low-life dumbass, inexperienced "man" but we gotta keep some life and humor in this thread. With Bean, I mean Humper, it just keeps getting dumber. He could almost make a movie from this.....Gheez!

Haven't heard from Stone yet and its 8pm. I miss him today, I hope he calls me tonight.

Yes, it is late and I am still up...Why? Talking to my Boo, yep yep. I also found an apartment...Wooo hooooo. There are a few minor details to be done but I will have the keys on Thursday and can move in then really. So after Thurdsay, I will prolly not be online because I have to transfer the cable to the new place and all. I will try to keep you updated but may be hard cause there is no one's computer I can use to log on here. EM, when I am situated I will send you my addy. Wish me luck ladies....

Queen, what am I gonna do without you when you're moving? Better call the cable company tomorrow (today) and get everything ready prior to the move!

Well, I made it through a tear-filled Tuesday, posting to the 11-year thread and just letting myself feel. Forgive me if I am repeating myself, but the death of my husband is tough because he passed me the virus when he knew he had it. He just didn't tell me, so it could have been prevented. Have you ever read my story in the Long-Term Survivors thread? Go to "Introduce Yourself" reply #93 or so, for my story.

I mean, my life isn't so bad, the worst thing is the emotional and mental stress that comes with this virus, and not having anyone really understand, who is here in my everyday life. That's why I am so glad I have my new friends in the Forums. My point is, is that the anniversary of my husband's death reminds me that I am pos and makes me scared, when I usually roll along, living pretty normally. Although this year has been one big transition, I still don't know where I'm going.

I've been unemployed since May, just met a great pos guy for the first time after dating about 2 dozen neggies since the new year and not disclosing to any of them. My life story is in here, as you all probably know.

I would really work myself up after David first died, as if to honor him or something. I didn't know what else to do. The black cloud would come looming in on his birthday, July 24th, then the anniversary of his death would rip me apart on August 21st, and then the anniversary of our wedding day on Oct 1st was awful. We were only married 1yr and 10 mos, and half of that was spent nursing him as he died. He was 28 and I was 26 when he died. So, we only had one wedding anniversary.

I want so much to start over and not be held back by this virus. I mean, I have done a lot since he's been gone, but this year with no job and neck and back probs, and also being single, its been strange. Not sure what the hell is happening anymore. Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other. That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet. How could I know yet? I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back. He says he likes talking to me because I am "real," which I understand. I remember the first pos person I ever IMed, it was incredible bec I had no one like that in my life that I could open up to. I am sure Stone is feeling that now. But already, I have visions of him getting sick and dying just like my late husband did. There's so much that's just out of our (my) control.

I worry too much, lol. I actually went to bed at 130am tonight, a decent hour, and then my Sustiva kicked in and gave me a weird, spooky dream, so I woke up at 4am and got the hell out of it. I was running away from an exBF in the dream, a guy from years ago, it was pretty vivid. I hardly ever dream. Why now?

Its later than shit, time for my next sleeping "shift." God help me, I feel so lost.

i have since finished reading the last posts, so Queen, yay for Boo, and congrats on the apartment! i am really glad things are shaping up! also things seem to have calmed down in the other respect, so that's great.Ditto Camille... glad to hear about Ian.

Em how was your family runion? I had a mini one here too, and a "mini AMG", I met 2 forums members, both female. which was great, but also scary/sad, which seems to happen when I meet poz people. I mean on one hand it's wonderful to instantly relate and be able to discuss all those issues that are normally swept under the carpet so openly, on the other that also means you overflow with them to some extent, scare and sadden yourself, and become scared and saddened for others.

So I guess what I'm saying ML is, if even casual lunches/dinner with poz pals had such effects on me, I imagine getting involved with a poz guy, no actually fall in love with one, would have done it tenfolds! In fact I alwasy do my head in when I get with a guy initially not matter what, b/c it makes us so vulnerable, all of a sudden there's someone there who is so important. It has taken me a year and a half to fully admit what my BF means and how desperately I need him in my life. Because it's so scary. Let alone when you've been involved with a poz man before, who infected you.

This infection by a knowing partner is so fucken common in poz women, I seriously think most women I know were infected that way. I just know so many cases online and in real life. We should start a thread about that, but right now I don't want to get angry.

Just wanna send a BIG FAT SMELLY HUG.

Dragonette (last day in London and back to the sticks tomorrow)

« Last Edit: August 22, 2007, 07:05:01 AM by Dragonette »

Logged

"If you keep one foot in yesterday, and one in tomorrow, you piss all over today". Betty Tacy

My first husband (the one who infected me) I'm sure didn't know he was poz. He probably wouldn't have cared anyway. Alcoholism killed him when he was 29 and I was 24. My second husband, who I told about me being poz, I met in Narcotics Anonymous. He ended up relapsing. I was on Dilaudid when I had the wasting syndrome about 13 or 14 years ago because I had lost so much weight that my bones were rubbing together. That was very painful. Anyway, he started taking my pills, melting them down and shooting them up. To make a long story short, he wiped out my bank account. He got my ATM card when I was sleeping one time, found my PIN number and went from ATM to ATM (this was back before the banks put a limit on how much you can get out in a day) and withdrew everything that was in the account. I filed a stolen card report, and a week later, a detective called me into the police station to identify his picture in the tape they pulled off the bank's ATM camera. There he was, his big mug stealing my money. Which was stupid, because everyone knows ATM machines have cameras. But I know that an addict will do anything when they are desperate, because I used to when I used to use drugs. But anyway, I haven't had good experiences with marriage and I doubt I will ever get married again. It's just too much work. I did have a relationship with a woman once. I really loved her and we had a civil union. It was pretty cool. But things didn't work out. Tonight I'm going to take this girl out to coffee and we're going to talk and see how things go from there. Wish me luck.... Cin, I'm glad to see things are working out for you and Stone. Keep us informed. I'm also glad you made it through the date of your husband's death o.k. I know when my first husband died, it took me a year to just get back to semi-normal feelings. Hang in there, fellow metal head! Queen, do you have Comcast? They can have things ready for when you move in, at least according to their advertisements. I hope the moving goes alright for you. Do you have people who are going to help you? Congrats on the new apartment. I didn't know you were looking. I guess I've rattled on for long enough. I have to eat breakfast pretty soon, and, of course finish my coffee.

Logged

I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Well, GQ, congrats on getting a new place! And, yes, I'm ready to send when you're ready. Drag, I had a great time at the reunion and it's nice to know you had a good, albeit thought-provoking, time in London. Poz means pondering---whether dating, making a friendship, or sitting alone--what was I thinking about before?

ML - Red flag time. Go ahead and call me Mother Hen, but two things sprung from your post. Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other. That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet. How could I know yet? I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back.

Something he's told you, or did, caused you to sense his temper might be the eventual undoing of your relationship. So often, because women are inclined to be accommodating and "encouraging" we overlook or push gently to the side, the obvious.

my Sustiva kicked in and gave me a weird, spooky dream, so I woke up at 4am and got the hell out of it. I was running away from an exBF in the dream, a guy from years ago, it was pretty vivid. I hardly ever dream. Why now?

Frankly ML, I think the issue invaded your sleep and caused your memorable dream. BF, running, are there any similarities between the two men? even if not, as in the paragraph above, you've envisioned the real possibility of the ending. I don't intend to come off pessimistic, just looking squarely at what you've shared as only an outsider can.

Compartmentalize. Tough to do. Easy to recommend. He's providing some much-needed emotional and physical attention, but at any costs to you? Only you can assess this. This is a very vulnerable time for you across the board and I just want to encourage (translate: encourage) you to steel yourself slightly; get the deep, uninterrupted sleep you need to keep that body and sharp mind running properly; keep your eyes on your job search and most important, your precious health which is key to everything else.

Would I like to see this be your Happily Ever After? Hell yes! But without compromising any of the things that are big deals to you. I'm not talking about compromises of the small, day-to-day, yielding variety. I know you're smart---this is text mirror time, that's all.

Gee, I better start cooking my chicken feed, no farmer here, and make some hen-brewed java. To play catch up...Bakery Man has yet to call which means he's still at or en route from his mountaintop work assignment or maybe he met a Mountain Woman! I, too, am in employment search mode and will interview on Monday. Fingers crossed.

On another topic, whether we eventually meet aligned with AMG 2008 or not, I'd like to suggest we coordinate something simple in an Eastern US city. Sleeping bags at Cindy's Hen House sounds cozy! Maybe we can find other accommodations, too, so there's not too much burden on one house. If we do this, I think we should plan in PM mode first and then move to phone or personal e-mail to ensure everyone's privacy and safety.

Camille, SS, Cristy, Betty and others...I hope you're well and enjoying these last days of summer. I can already feel fall in the air. Cristy...just thought of your new work---how's it going? Still good? Bloom still intact?

Em

edited to add: Betty, You were posting while I was typing away. I hope your meeting with this new woman goes well. May we have the Breakfasts of Champions in our respective domiciles.

ML - Red flag time. Go ahead and call me Mother Hen, but two things sprung from your post. Now I've met a pos guy, and Stone and I don't want to go more than a few days without seeing each other. That's great, but I am afraid he may be a hothead and that down the road I may regret this, I don't know yet. How could I know yet? I'd like to think I can help him (translate encourage him) cause he's been to the edge of death and back.

Something he's told you, or did, caused you to sense his temper might be the eventual undoing of your relationship. So often, because women are inclined to be accommodating and "encouraging" we overlook or push gently to the side, the obvious.

Em~

I honestly posted my thoughts unclearly. You know I wouldn't back pedal and deny anything unless it weren't true. The "help" I mentioned giving to Stone is in light of the virus, not the "hothead" personality that I fear is lurking. He is scared of this virus and has had no one to talk to, so I feel I am encouraging him on that level -- to talk, to discuss, to seek info for himself.

As far as the "hothead" thing, it involves his child and another parent who was threatening to his child. I don't have kids, but I know when someone does something rude and/or assinine to ME, I get pretty pissed. Stone is dealing with a snobby, rich parent who took it upon himself to "discipline" Stone's kid at a camp a few weeks ago. The camp owners sat idle and the counselors were all younger adults who stood by and watched, without intervening.

I called him on his actions since the event and he agrees that he took measures so that he wouldn't sock it to the snobby parent. He knows how he can get fired up and did a few things to avoid being face-to-face with the SOB. So, it was a red flag for me too, but I immediately brought it up in our conversation. I am still on high alert to see if other situations arise, which would tell me that this attitude is part of his regular lifestyle.

I have never dated a bully. I simply have passed those types by in the past because they showed lack of self-respect and restraint with their emotions. I am hoping this is just one case in which this anger from him comes to light. It invloves his kid, so I am trying to be compassionate, but calling him on it just the same.

As far as the dream....It was funny, but scary when I was in it. I dated a guy in 2001 who was a truck driver (first and last time I'll do that), and he actually left me for another woman. In my dream, I was in a grocery store in the neighborhood where I lived as a child. The old BF was in the store looking for me, and I was running, trying to dodge around corners and get away. I ended up in the back of the store where they keep everything stocked, and I made my way out of one of the bays and into the old BF's truck! I hopped in the 18-wheeler (picture a city girl behind the wheel, lmao!) and somehow under pressure, put the tractor in gear and started driving. I was slowly shifting and moving through the parking lot and leaving, having locked the doors to the cab, when old BF's face appeared upside down through the passenger window! He had gotten on top of the rig and was riding along with me! I woke myself up at that point, also had low blood sugar, and was quite nervous last night as my doggie has been sick.

I usually take my Sustiva and it kicks in about 90 minutes later while I am still awake at night, on the computer. Last night I took it at 130am and went to bed. It kicked in and the dream woke me up at 4am. I was here IMing Queen close to 5am and could still feel the effects of the drug. I can't believe it lasted so long! Maybe tonight I will stay up while it kicks in, instead.

Em~ I see your point with the dream. I was a psyc major in college and find a lot of symbolism in my life and in the lives of others. I know what you are seeing, from the outside looking in. Let's continue to see where this path takes me. It is so early in the game with Stone, anything is possible. I am a firm believer in gut instinct and red flags, so I am with you on this. That is precisely why I HAD to bring up the topic of his anger where his child was concerned. Usually I would have let it slide, talking myself out of worrying over nothing so early in the game with someone.

My life is too precious for me to throw it away. I am thankful for your advice and will let you know what happens.

I am guilty of #7 at times, but only fastfood at $5 per meal, and not recently. During the past two weeks I have eaten lunch from home. Hell, I've been waking up PAST lunchtime, lol! Did good today, though, woke up at 10am even after my restless night.

I just ventured out to this forum the other night. I read through the Dating Chronicles I - IV and wanted to introduce myself. I'm 41, poz from an x-boyfriend of 5 yrs, who says he didn't know he was infected - and chose to have a baby after diagnosis. My child is negative and 10 yrs old now. I broke-up with the boyfriend after 13 yrs of trying to be a team (unsuccessfully).

Anyway, I like reading about your dating situations. Seems like some of you are talking to some of the same guys I've talked to! Makes me realize how small our online hetero population is. No offense to the 'bi' girls...

Here are a few things I've learned about poz online dating sites:I've had some interesting conversations with men online, but prefer the phone. If they don't ask for my phone number after the 4th email - I simply move on. My life is way to busy to have "pen pals" with non-serious men. I don't even sign into instant messaging, it's also too casual and a big time waster. Those guys always tend to flirt sexually or chat about worthless non-interesting things like, 'the phone is ringing', or 'my dog wants to go outside' or even better 'what are you wearing' !! I don't send 'flirts' or respond to them anymore either, as I find they don't lead anywhere.

I have several guys I'm talking to/seeing now, and we'll see if any of them make it to the next phase... I will state that I have decided to remain pure through my dating, as I'm really praying for Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now.

Welcome to the threads, GF! There's a bit of an echo in the Hen House today as no one has been around much today. I'm glad to see you here, and although lengthy, I'm glad you read our history with the dating threads.

Interesting how your take on meeting a man is a total 180 from mine! I prefer NOT to jump to the phone first because I find that just about everyone can engage in polite conversation. I like the IM route myself, where I can weed out the weirdos from one evening online. I look deep and can tell a lot about a guy's character that way. Of course, after IMing, a phone call can blow everything to smithereens if the guy sounds like a total doofus. LOL I am pretty perceptive and have met some really nice guys this year, all neggies though, until recently. I'll see Stone tomorrow night for the third time in a week. Keep your fingers crossed for me, and I'll do the same for you!

Again, its GREAT to see you here! Sounds like you have been pos for 10+ years. You may want to post in "Introduce Yourself" in the Long-Term Survivors' Forum, as well as in "By Way of Introduction" here in the Women's Forum when you feel up to it.

Well, hey, Chicken Big, I think you've laid all the messages you possibly could while we were out and about!!

Cindy, thanks for the clarification about the kid-related stuff and for understanding why I wrote as I did. I hope it's a winner for you...there's nothing like being able to love and be loved.BTW -- that truck driving scene from your dream when he's looking in the window...yikey mikey. Good movie scene.

Msoftie -- Welcome. I like that Mr. Right vs Mr. Right Now. I look forward to more of your posts.

I guess I will add my few pecks for today. There has been so much said that I will respond to what I can remember.. As far as moving, yeah, I am excited it about it. It wouldn't have been my first choice of places but it is better than where I am now. I haven't even started packing yet. What am I waiting for? Actually the moving truck which I will not be able to get til the end of the month. I will be here for a few more days maybe. Tomorrow when I get the keys to the new place, I will be cleaning and then prolly later move small things over to the new place.

I don't know who mentioned it but I think it would be great if we could get together for our own little slumber party at someone's house. Is Moonlight volunteering her crib? I think it would be fun. But where would I go to smoke? Cigs and other... I'm used to being kicked outside so I hope this will be a summer event so I won't freeze my ass off. I have really enjoyed the dating threads and feel like I know all of you pretty well. Moonlight is like my lil sis, we talk so much online and I even send her texts to make her smile.

Ms-- Welcome to the forums and the thread, I'm sure you will fit in with the rest of us hens. I'm with Moonlight on the phone thing and also it is hard for me to hear sometimes talking to someone on the phone. I wear hearing aids and the phone causes a bit of feedback. I prefer IMing and with yahoo now if you have a mic and speakers you can call someone online which makes it easier and safer because if they are humpers, they don't have your number and you never have to talk to them again.. I agree with you about looking for Mr. Right instead of Mr. Right Now, Goddess knows I have had enough of them in my lifetime.

Dragonette--- I'm starting to see too that a lot of females are being infected from their partners. I can't speak for them but my ex knew he was poz when he got with me. I had to find out through a co worker I was actually having an affair with. He was really cool about it, not mad at all and he was who I broke down and cried with. The thing is the guy found out from some nurse who worked in the correctional facility my ex was in at the time. SO, I do not believe especially when it comes to blacks working in the medical field that they do not keep things confidential. I hate to make it sound racist but it's true, if someone black knows your status around here, you better believe they told someone. Sad but true. Anyhoo, when I confronted the ex, he didn't deny it and I was willing to still be with him. What did he do? Left me for a crackhead who was pregnant by him and if I had to guess, prolly the one who infected him.

Moonlight-- I saw that vices list you posted. The only thing I spend mad money on is cigs, pepsi and weed. I am responsible enough to take care of my bills though before I even get my weed. Just call me a caffenated responsible pothead!!!!

I'm happy for Camille, she better get her lovestruck ass over here....

Well, I am going to try and keep this short. I just pulled a 13 hour day at work then had several orders to place online for my PartyLite candle business that I do on the side.

Moon- I am sorry that I did not write earlier to tell you that I am so sorry you were having a bad day and were upset on the anniversary of your husbands death. My heart goes out to you. I wish you happy days a head, but I am sure Stone Cold can help with that.

Queen - I am so glad that you have found a new apartment. I wish I was there so I could help you move. I will look forward to seeing you back online.

Msoftie - Welcome to the forum. This forum has picked me up when I have been down as well as given me an outlet for advise. Hope you stay tuned in.

Em - I am so not looking forward to fall. I have just had time to start working on my TAN. I have heard that if you are tan you look 10lbs thinner and I need all of the help I can get.

Drag- I hope your travels from London back to the sticks went OK. You may have said or I just missed it, where you there for vacation?

Betty - I hope your meeting/outing with your new friend went well. Thanks for your amazing story. I am sorry that happened to you and the reason why I say it was amazing is because you have managed to bounce back after many obstacles were thrown your way.

ML/Lady Lyrics -- That would be a Claptonesque "whiter shade of pale" ! Wouldn't it? Drivin' arm tans are so, well, unique, aren't they? I've considered a truck driving career at various points along the way. Solitude. Independence. CB radio chatter (only kidding). Sightseeing.That would ensure a ten-pound loss look on the left side of my left arm, right? BTW -- I'm curious...did Doc simply fade into the sunset?

GQ - LMAO - Wanting a refund from Goddess for your au naturale tan not giving you a leaner look. We will accommodate your medicinal smoking needs by scheduling the slumber party during a season that will keep your tan ass warm. 'kay? Good luck on the move. Hate moving. Stressful. I never pitch enough crap and drag it to the next haunt. Not so anymore. Downsizing as much as I can while I have the strength and motivation. Finally.

SS - I'd not heard of that 10lbs less tan factor. I'm like ML. I look more like a product from a mushroom farm than planet earth -- except my arms from gardening/mowing/walking. Partylite has some very nice stuff---I hope you're doing well with your side business. I went to a party once and purchased two sizeable five-candle, wrought-iron-like holders--they're great for table centers or putting in the fireplace instead of a grate/faux logs, etc. In fact, (selling feature for you) I got glasses to fit the diameter of the platforms for the candles and use tealights in them. The glass refracts the light and makes the whole blazing unit safer in dinner/buffet settings.

ML/ Re: the Vice List -- this was a good exercise in examining where my vice dough goes. I definitely have some leaks and some former leaks I'm glad I plugged!1. Coffee - make it at home AND sometimes have it at coffee shop - it IS my remaining "addictive" vice. I like caffeine. 2. Cigarettes - quit 20 yrs ago this month 3. Alcohol - quit 20 yrs ago last March 4. Bottled water - quit buying what little I bought last month after the recent reports of how companies must print on the label when source is tap water. I now "bottle" my own tap H20 except when there's no alternative. 5. Manicures- once in a very blue moon - maybe twice a year for fun/treat and to see someone else do it far better than I do 6. Car washes - only periodically - car is now almost ten yrs old, so I let the rain wash it or I wash it when it's crying out for attention. I certainly don't wax it anymore.7. Weekday lunches out - hmmmmm. not lunches, but dinners. This is a bit of a problem. Sometimes due to laziness (not having shopped for ingredients) or just being too tired to want to cook. I love Thai and Vietnamese cooking or a great burger (like red meat but try to hold back). All three are available within a stone's throw of home, so, this is the top money-sapping vice for me. I can work on this one.8. Vending machines snacks - hardly ever9. Interest charges on credit cards - rarely10. Unused memberships - in the distant past -- good intentions at gyms -- I'm just better off walking, weeding and helping people move objects for exercise--but, this winter, I'm going to try to use the ball,5 and 10# free weights and Nordic Track that I collected (again with those good intentions) and actually create an area in which to work out. I notice I lose muscle mass faster than ever before if I'm not active.

Well, gee, with all of this lifestyle introspection, I'm gonna get my lazy butt out of the chair, put a grocery list together, see the dentist, go to work and try to come home, shop and cook food tonight! Oh yippee. Not.

Maybe Bakery Man will call today, huh? I'd much rather be writing about a pending date than the innards of day-to-day life. Absence can also make a heart grow weary and bored, too.

Betty, oh Betty!! Can we know how the meeting with New Woman went? Certainly hope it was enjoyable. And Camille, pray tell what art thou doing?

Off to find some order in the pecking order of the To Do list. . . . . .. . . . ... . . . . . . . ..

Thanks Cindy for getting my head out of the clouds- I posted this in the other thread but copied over here because this is really funny.

Ian is fantastic. He spoils me rotten and he is romantic and passionate. I told him to come to this site because there's a lot of information for someone's who is negative. He asked if it was ok to read the forums...and I thought, I have nothing to hide...sure.

WELL- about a half an hour later I send him an email saying "you may read some stuff that you'll find disturbing"...and I receive an email right back saying "Yeah I see that".

hmmmm. I thought. Emails don't usually carry a voice but my gut told me he was really upset. So I called him up asked him what was wrong?

Laughing, he said, I'm an idiot. By you creating aliases for all the other men in your life I thought there were other men that you were dating , "for a second a was really upset over this Ian guy". LOL Cheesy

I think I laughed all night about it. Don't worry, he won't be reading it anymore...I sent over to thebody.com for information LOL Cheesy

Any way its brilliant the time we spend together. Last night we watched "trainspotting" snuggled, ate pizza and drank Guinness, what more could I ask for......oh yeah, and sex.

Cindy have you heard from Stone, weird music moment that must have been...That other guy is such a twit.Queenie- I'm glad to hear that Boo's around and keeping you up all hours.Sun- Glad to see you posting, nice to meet you.Betty- Wow, that is really a crazy life you lived. How did things end up with the girl in the cafe?

How are the rest of you EM, MS, Drag, and anyone else I might have forgotten.

Hey Camille- I am so glad things are working out with Ian. I hope things keep going well, fantastic! My meeting with the girl went fine. We actually went to a rare public restaurant that still allows smoking in a certain part of it, as she wanted to go there to be able to smoke. I got a salad and iced tea and she ordered a salad and a cherry coke and we were there for like an hour and a half. She's very nice, likes the arts (which is a plus), but apparently is very high maintenance. I'm in recovery, and her sponsor is my best friend and she told me about the high maintenance part. We'll probably go out again in a couple weeks. I need to get to know her more. I think she isn't at the point yet of trusting me with a lot of personal information, probably for fear that I'm going to tell my best friend. And that's understandable. She's very attractive too. Cin, my metal friend, I'm wondering how things are going with you and Stone.....

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Hello Ladies. Em, glad to see you back and safe. Work is going well, same place I have been for over a year but I just part-time it cause that's when I have a babysitter. Sunday was rough, too many people coming in all at the same time and I actually got a complaint, which is so rare it's like hen's teeth. As far as dating, I quit! i gave Tenn my phone #, no call. Fuck it, I am sick of trying. I would like to find a man but am not going to beg. I got neggies at work chasing me but that's out. Queen, glad you are getting a new place. Hope that your move goes smoothly and you have everything you need. I love your tan but your is natural and good for you. I always stay pale except for my driving tan cause skin cancer runs in my family soI avoid the sun. it might not help, all kinds of cancer run in my family. Camille, Sex? What's that. Other than my surgery, no one has touched me for over 2 years. I am so jealous but happy for you. and for ML as well. Betty, glad your date went wel. Trust will come and meanwhile, enjoy. Msoftie, Welcome to the forums, Great bunch of people here. Hope to hear more from you. Ladies, I would love to meet you all. ML's is only a couple hundred miles away so I'm in as long as my schedule allows. Anyway, Love ya'll. Cristy

Wow! THIS is more like it, my fine, feathered flock! I felt so damn alone in here yesterday. I really need to get a job. I have been applying left and right, but at age 37 with a college degree and lots of experience, I am stuck in the middle. I am overqualified for many positions, and underqualified because I don't have a Masters. Well....shit on it. LOL

I am missing Nic / zachysmom. Where are you GF? Come out, come out wherever you are........Cock-a-doodle-do.......?

Spoke to Stone last night for about 1-1/2 hrs. We talk every night now, one day hasn't gone by where we haven't talked. Tonight will be the third time I've see him. In ONE week. Doesn't Bean, I mean Humper, wish he was Stone? Not a chance in hell there, lol!

As far as Doc, I called him last week on Thursday to check on him. Seems the weekend prior some shit hit the fan legally, so I have laid low with him. He is really stressed out with all that is going on, not his fault, but he is in the middle because of his great mind, and has had to seek legal counsel. That's the last I heard, anyway.

Yes Betty, hearing "Stone Cold" play was PRETTY wild, esp at Stone's house. Tuesday night I had Yahoo tunes going on my computer and "Stone In Love" by Journey came on. I haven't heard that in ages, either. Strange shit going on with the Stone themes, but it keeps me on my toes! Glad to hear about your new friend. No sense in rushing, it ruins all of the excitement! Wait, WHO am I to say that?

Sunseeker, look what you started with the whole tanning thing, lmao! I say go out with that guy on a double-date as friends. I think it would boost your confidence, I just don't wanna hear about you crawling around from too many drinks!

You know Em, I am familiar with Clapton's lyrics, just never thought of myself that way, lol. "Whiter shade of pale" works, but I think Queen is gonna call me Powder from here on out, lol. Em, Bakery man needs to get himself off the mountain and bake you a cake, as fast as he can. Tell him there's a flock of hens anxiously awaiting your rendezvous!

Hi Drag~ I got your PM this morning. I was asking about the eye trouble cause Stone had it a few years back. Seems he had maybe 3 OIs in about 2 years prior to diagnosis, as he first got diagnosed and then shortly after. Scares me, but he is on meds and is undetectable, with a CD4 in the 600s, so that makes me feel better. I just can't imagine meeting someone and then having them go down the same road my late husband did. I have to remind myself that things are different now.

Oh man, not to get misty, but I can't help it now. I feel REALLY close with all of you, especially from our rapport here over the past two weeks. To think that something dreadful could happen to any one of us is heartbreaking. I love you GFs so very much. We have to promise to always stay in touch, and yes, have our own little AMG, East Coast style. We can be a great source of strength for each other if and when bad times ever come upon us. Maybe one day we can even invite the gay bois, too, lol.....

On a lighter note, I am just brainstorming, taking the "high" Queen's requests into consideration for our get-together down the road......Maybe next May or June we could get together. We could also take a short field trip down to my parents house which is about a 20-minute drive from me. They have 12 acres so Queen could go and smoke to her heart's content. My Mom smoked weed a lot in the 80s, hell, she'd probably get out there and light one up with you, GF! LOL She is also quite the dancer (flashing back to 2 weeks ago at their place....)

Frederick , where I live, is a nice suburb, and all of the highways converge right near my place so its easy to get to. I-70 comes in from PA to the west and Baltimore (BWI airport) to the east, I-95 runs up from VA/NC and connects to highways near Dulles airport in VA....Ah yes, I think my place is "The Roost." Plenty of hotels and places to eat nearby, too. Its pretty nice here in suburbia without being so congested like downtown somewhere in a big city would be. We even have a quaint little area in the "City of Frederick," the historic district with restaurants everywhere.

Can you see us tearin' it up at one big bar one evening? I know we're all on a budget, and getting here would cost money in itself, but we could cook out on the grill every night and eat good for cheap. I wonder if my parents would be willing to host all of us for an evening or two? I'm really excited. I could easily have 3 of you at my place with 2 of us sharing my bathroom and two in the basement sharing the bathroom, a few more at a hotel just 3 miles from my house.....and I would certainly be willing to pitch in where I could to help pay for food. I know some of us are on limited incomes. Hell, I don't even HAVE an income, but by next year I'll have SOMETHING ...I think we need to talk about this more, it could be like The Ya-Ya Sisterhood! I'm really excited!

I am actually feeling a little crappy and crampy today, Aunt Flo is on her way over, but I go to massage therapy later, so that should help to relax me. Wish Nic was here so I could ask her about stopping the pill. I have 10 days to go and if I decide to stay on it, now is the time to decide. This cycle has been easier than last month's, I think the fibroids I had detected in May are shrinking some. Just gotta wait and see. Figures I get a playmate as I decide to go off the pill. Hope my cycle straightens out. I'm not getting a fucking D&C for the hell of it, no way, no way, no way.

Camille, I wonder if I can "snuggle" with Stone like you do with Ian. The man is one HOT horn dog, but with Flo dropping by soon, he and I may just be snuggling tonight. It'll be interesting to see how he treats me. I think he will be a gentleman, that's what makes it all so exciting. I am just where I want to be right now! Just have to wait and make sure he's not out to just get his rocks off, you know? I'm not quite kicking myself for slingshoting into this dating thing with him, but it certainly goes against anything I have ever done before, and is a first for me. I am content, so that's all that matters for now. Yes, "Mother Em (Hen)" I have the radar up. I don't take any crap.

Msoftie~ If its not too much to ask, where are you from? I respect your privacy, but just curious as the flock is discussing a get-together!

I think the get together sounds great! I live in Indiana though, and would probably have to mapquest the whole thing. I have a niece who lives in Baltimore. Maybe she would know how to get there. I don't even know where Frederick is. But it sounds like it would be a lot of fun. We need each other. There are no support groups in my town for women with HIV. We don't have massage services etc. like some other towns do. BTW Cin, when you get a massage, does your sugar crash? I got a massage once and mine really crashed. I was just wondering if you had any tips or if anything like that ever happened to you.

Today is a slow day for me. All I really had to do was to clean house. I was supposed to go to the Breast Care Center at one of the hospitals to get a follow-up mammogram done for a needle biopsy on a lump I had to have earlier this year, but I really didn't feel like going. The biopsy was negative; I think they're just trying to get more money. So I called and rescheduled.

That's really about all that's been going on with me. Got to go-my therapist will be here in like 15 minutes. Yes, I have a therapist who comes to my apartment. I've been seeing him since '91 and he and his wife are my granddaughter's godparents. Take care everybody!

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

A therapist who comes to your roost? Oh Betty dahling, you are one lucky chick.

ML, no wing flappin' about it, you won't hear a peep from me about protecting yourself. May I be the first to chirp, no clucking way!, I promise.

Cristy - why did I think you were heading to a new job? maybe it was just the post-surgical return to work----or, uh-oh, perhaps I have you cornfused with another hen? well, glad to know things are going well. Just watch, once you've neutralized Tenn in your mind, he'll call.

QG, you know, making the timing of this get together accommodate your aversion to the cold air on your tail feathers pushes it well into 2008!! I think you're plenty funny w/o it! At least from one of your recent sit on someone's uh, someone's um, sitting on somethin' posts. So, I'm game for doing something earlier if we can. To borrow a JK, just sayin'.

Read an article today about plummeting flight prices. Could be a good thing for all of us---although I know some of us will be driving for sure.

Camille - Gotta side with Cristy. Don't have sex anymore, but recall just enough about it to be slightly jealous and very glad for you. Someone should be blowing the carbon out of their engines, heck it may as well be you and ML!! Vrooooooooooooooommm. Vrooooooooooooooommmm!!

ML---loved the bake me a cake as fast as you can thang...I'm neutralized already. I'll be very pleasantly surprised when the call comes, but a little voice inside says, ain't nothin' wrong with the phone fella! But, I think he's a get to know you in person type and not a phone user----ah well.

Meanwhile, I found the most handsome hunk of elder statesman human on the POZ site. Sent a brief note, we'll see if he replies. I don't use a photo there and I'm sure that would make me skittish as hell if I were the recipient. If he writes, I'll be sure to add it to our chicken feed.

On that note, I'm hungry!!! Just got home from work and it's time to ---oh yeah, make some food in my own econo-kitchen so I don't make the Thai or Vietnamese any wealthier tonight.

OMG, I am freaking exhausted. I been at the other place since about 1ish going over the place cleaning it and airing it out. I see one problem already, I got 2 sets of Bebe kids living close to me, across the street and next door. One of them already tried to prank us by ringing the doorbell and running but my room mate busted her. Then this one little heffer had the nerve to ask me if I was staying the night there tonight. Even though I am not yet, I told her I was and why, does she plan on robbing me? WTF? Where is her damn mother? Don't get me wrong, I like kids but not ones with no home training and act like they are already working towards getting a criminal record...

EM--- Even though I am a January baby, I hate the cold so yeah 2008 when it's warm would work better for me. Airfares are dropping? Now how long is this suppose to last prolly not by the time we would get together.

Moon, oops, I mean Powder.... So you are saying I have to go over your Mom's house to smoke? Maybe I should camp out over there and me and your Mom can stay puffy.... Then during the day or whatever I can be with everyone else cause you know I love my weed..

Now y'all don't want to talk about when the last time I had some lovins, it's been about as long as Christy and the only penis I see is when I pop in a porno which I haven't done in awhile cause I got tired of teasing myself..LMAO...

Moon- I promise if I go out on the that double date I promise not to be crawling around from to many drinks and I promise not to show any boobs either. But is cleaveage ok?

Queen - Not that I promote violence considering my profession but I say throw some eggs at those pain in the ass kids. I have learned from 12 years of experience if you don't nip their behavior in the bud they will never stop.

Girls sorry about the tanning comment I just would rather have tan cottage cheese thighs then white ones. One day I will invest in lypo after I have a kid.

Well, you may all be happy to know that as of 3pm today I have given up on Cop #1. I sent him a text message after he was rolling around on the ground with some criminal with a gun. I waited till he cleared the scene and was at the office going hope before sending the message. I asked him if he was OK and he said Yes and that was it. So I am done. Stupid me for telling him that I was + after 1/2 hour of great four play in my kitchen. DUMB DUMB.

Cop #2 is still texting but have not decided what to do with him We will see how that progresses.

Moon- I am one month off the pill and Auntie Flow came to day. But it was nice this first month not to have a period for 6 weeks. I am sure that won't last long. I also have fibroids but this month after stopping the pill has been fine. I did not even spot the week prior. I stopped taking the pill since I broke up with my ex and I was hoping I could loose some weight after sometime. I just have to see how the migraines are without being on the pill. Being on the pill really kept my migraines at bay.

Well, to the rest of the ladies I hope you all have a great night, till tomorrow.

Maybe I should camp out over there and me and your Mom can stay puffy.... LMAO. You'll end up converting all of us or cause us to revisit our teenhoods. Better bring extra. Okay, so you win...2008...and that ought to give Drag enough time to find some cheap airfare and maybe we could woo Englishgirl (who has yet to visit us here, but hopefully will soon) and Sweetasmelia (who also has yet to visit) and the Ann/Annie's and, and, ....to consider coming to the US.

Well, interesting development. A person I'd e-chatted with via POZ re-emerged tonight. Communication had simply evaporated. Turns out he was on the road for two weeks. So, not a word from the elder statesman, but the younger statesman---Surprise!

GQ---Your reference to Bebe girls went over my head. Who are they? Glad you did the tough neighbor act early. Hope the place suits you.

Cristy---Figured out the work confusion item. It was Zachysmom who was heading to a new job. Pardonnez moi!

OMFG, You never saw Bebe's Kids? It's an animated movie about these 5 kids that are bad as hell. The kids are black but they cause havoc wherever they go. The main reason they are bad is because their mother is always gone and leaves them alone all the time. I guess prolly none of you never heard of Bebe's kids. Hmmm, in this instance, I guess it really is a black thing.

Now Em, Are you saying I will corrupt you all to smoke? Not me, I don't do peer pressure, it would have to be your choice. For those who would consent I guess I would have to roll you joints cause you're amatuer smokers. I, myself smoke blunts because I am The Queen of Green... Now when you say statesmen, does that mean they are in politics or they are from where you are?

I think it would be great if the ladies overseas could come to our little hen party. I would seriously be tripping over the accents. I love accents especially when it's a man!!!!! I'd be ready to throw my panties at them..lol..

Sun-- It is hard to nip kids in the bud because when you try to correct their bad asses they try to cuss you out or their parents give tude. Then the police end up getting called because they want to try to fight cause you're telling them how bad their kids are. I have seen this happen before. What I'll try to do is investigate who their parents are if possible.

Hmm, wonders where Powder is, like I don't know... I'm sure she'll get a kick out of my previous post. I think I got her hooked on one of my computer games, she thought it was funny as hell. Tomorrow it will be making calls and getting things transferred over to the new place. Since my cousin said he will move me, I am hoping I can have things over to the place by the weekend but it really depends on when things can be transferred. If my cuz backs out on me then I will have to wait til the end of the month which is just the end of next week....

and you know I'm the whitest one here.........I'll post about Stone in the morning. What a nice guy! What a gentleman! He scored points with me tonight and we weren't even horizontal....which is how I'm gonna be in a minute when my head hits my pillow.

~"Powder"

P.S. - SCAMMERS?

Full moon is coming, they are out in droves!

chukauzor, 40corpus christi, TexasFavorite TV: "Oprah Wilson Show"

Also armani1962, he MAY be legit, not sure, and beyoubeme, he sounds like crap

I always miss getting in on the conversations here! Probably because I go to bed before anyone else and am usually up when people are catching their zzzzzzzzzzzzz's. The appointment with the therapist went well. I described exactly what happened the night my mum passed. I can do that without crying now (pretty much). I think because it was so peaceful.

I haven't had sex in like four or five years (it's been so long, I'm losing track ). So I can sympathize for those of us who aren't getting any. But for those of you who are, go on girls! Hope it's good!

Gotta go eat breakfast. Hey Powder, did you happen to read my question to you about when you get a massage, if that causes your blood sugar to crash? I'm asking you also, Queen of Green, because I know you're a fellow diabetic.

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I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

Now Em, Are you saying I will corrupt you all to smoke? Not me, I don't do peer pressure, it would have to be your choice. For those who would consent I guess I would have to roll you joints cause you're amatuer smokers. I, myself smoke blunts because I am The Queen of Green... Now when you say statesmen, does that mean they are in politics or they are from where you are?

I like joints myself and will provide my own, but blunts work also. If nobody else will smoke with you, Queen, I will. Been smoking for 22 years. Okay, I know I said I Quit as far as dating but check this out. I signed up for POzmatch last night. Immediately got a IM from a guy I talked to once before on the personals. I thought he was a asshole then and I definitely think he's one now. He got mad because I wouldn't go on yahoo and IM him. For one thing that involves downloading stuff(big No-no even though I have my own email, this is not my computer) and I told him that. So he told me I was as bad as the scammers. WTF. I put him on ignore but what a dick.Anyway, I also talked to another fella, he seemed nice. I like pozpersonals but the features on pozmatch are really cool. But I think it's a trial basis, then you have to pay. I can't afford that but will play with it while it's free. Betty, I sleep at night as well. So I get up and feel like I have missed most of the action and have to catch up. Glad you can talk to about your mom. Time will ease it but it's cool your therapist comes to your house Em, that's okay that you confused me with Zacysmom, I still love you. How could I not, you have a great Sense of humor. Alright, 2008 ,That would be better for me as well. I can get some money saved and arrange for babysitting. Dragonette, Glad to see you back. Niki says you are lovely and I think that means the same as cool. Hope to meet all of you at some point. Love ya'll. Cristy

Hi Camille, yes, I noticed I am even my own Catch sometimes on the home page, lol!

Oh I am tired today, back is sore from my massage yesterday. Now Betty is calling me Powder, too, lol! To answer the question about blood sugar dropping, yes, it can happen, esp if you are getting a full body massage that is pretty intense. I mean, go figure, all of your major muscle groups and then some, are being worked and your metabolism gets going faster. So, it makes sense. I haven't had trouble with it personally over the past 2 months, though. This is because my neck and upper back are getting the massaging, and its done moderately, for a half hour. But yes, if you go for an hour or more and they are kneading you like dough, sugar levels can drop. Always take ibuprofen and drink water before you go. Push the water in the evening afterwards to flush the released toxins from your system. I suggest eating a little something before a major massage, to curb the sugar from dropping.

Goodness, now everyone wants to light up at the AMG, lmao! I actually hate smoking, esp weed (no offense, Q), and won't tolerate sitting in a smoking section at a restaurant. It just comes from being a non-smoker my entire life, also from seeing Mom high as a kite back in the day when I was little. Yeah, call me a prude!

SS~ Yes, cleavage is OK, I am still getting used to mine, lol! I only got boobs from lipo meds over the past two years. I went off the meds and the boobs stayed. What luck! Wish I could get my bubble butt back, but it seems to have gone to my stomach. Like Mom says "Chin up, tits out" and maybe the stomach won't be noticed, lmao! Also, thanks for posting about Aunt Flo. I have had so many issues with bleeding the week before I am supposed to. Damn liver must be messed up from meds, and therefore the dose of the contraceptives isn't quite enough. I have been on the pill since 1989 so I am mortified that all of the pain and heavy bleeding will come back! Thats how it was in college and HS for me. Used to get tunnel vision on day one, but I am a grown woman now, maybe things have changed some......

Queen~ Who did one of the more popular voices on Bebe's Kids? Some rapper or someone with a scratchy voice? I can't recall who it was, just thought it was funny as shit at the time! LOL

Went to see Stone around 8pm last night and we sat on the couch and talked for awhile. He offered to buy me a couch and he is on SSDI. I immediately refused. We hardly know each other, and a couch isn't a priority, or I would have one already. We talked about the Fall coming, harvest time, Halloween, corn mazes, I LOVE that stuff! Fall and winter are my favorite seasons, I don't do well in the heat of summer at all. Stone also said I would "meet his son, most definitely, " he even invited me over for this weekend to be with the two of them. I declined, saying it was too early for that. I am keeping a safe distance as things are still very new with us. I don't want to rush it, lol, well shit on THAT, huh? I thought about staying over last night, he invited me to, but I didn't want to be woken up at 7am, even though he said I could stay and sleep in. I got home around 230am this morning.

It was a nice evening, he hasn't ceased to amaze me more and more each time we talk. Yes, we actually talk, too! LOL I realize I have this stereotype about him now, and its like I am waiting for the bottom to drop out, esp with the hothead thing. I will take it easy and see what happens. If things keep going as they are, I will be more comfortable over time.

Edited to add my Scorpio horoscope: "Analyzing risks is one of your strengths, but sometimes in the realm of romance, it can become overanalyzing. Trust your gut feeling and don't be afraid to act on an impulse, get caught up in a moment!"

Well, imagine THAT! Me? Overanalyzing, lol! (I do that ALL of the time.)

Goodness, now everyone wants to light up at the AMG, lmao! I actually hate smoking, esp weed (no offense, Q), and won't tolerate sitting in a smoking section at a restaurant. It just comes from being a non-smoker my entire life, also from seeing Mom high as a kite back in the day when I was little. Yeah, call me a prude!

! Wish I could get my bubble butt back, but it seems to have gone to my stomach. Like Mom says "Chin up, tits out" and maybe the stomach won't be noticed, lmao!

Went to see Stone around 8pm last night and we sat on the couch and talked for awhile. He offered to buy me a couch and he is on SSDI. I immediately refused. We hardly know each other, and a couch isn't a priority, or I would have one already. We talked about the Fall coming, harvest time, Halloween, corn mazes, I LOVE that stuff! Fall and winter are my favorite seasons, I don't do well in the heat of summer at all. Stone also said I would "meet his son, most definitely, " he even invited me over for this weekend to be with the two of them. I declined, saying it was too early for that. I am keeping a safe distance as things are still very new with us. I don't want to rush it, lol, well shit on THAT, huh? I thought about staying over last night, he invited me to, but I didn't want to be woken up at 7am, even though he said I could stay and sleep in. I got home around 230am this morning.

It was a nice evening, he hasn't ceased to amaze me more and more each time we talk. Yes, we actually talk, too! LOL I realize I have this stereotype about him now, and its like I am waiting for the bottom to drop out, esp with the hothead thing. I will take it easy and see what happens. If things keep going as they are, I will be more comfortable over time.

~Cindy

Hello, Lovey. Just wanted to respond to a few things. I will always smoke ciggies but never in the room with someone it bothers. I can be very polite and you deserve it.Sorry about the mom thing. The weed is always a outside thing but Queen and I will keep each other company or ya'll can come out with us and just sit a distance away. You are a very wise woman to take things easy with Stone but I knew you were. Keep doing what you are doing and i love ya. Cristy

I'm sorry, I hope I haven't ruffled any feathers with the smoking thing. Second-hand smoke gives me a headache, and I will only brave it in bars with a really good band playing, lol. As long as smokers are mindful of others nearby and not exhaling in their faces, then I am tolerant of it at times, i.e. in a bar situation.

As far as weed, yes, it goes way back with me to when I was a kid growing up in the 70s and 80s. I knew it was illegal and didn't like the fact that Mom and Dad were "breaking the rules." I shoulda been a cop, lol. So, as a child, it sat wrong with me at a very early age, and has stayed that way ever since.

Now, as an adult, I am tolerant of others' choices, as they are not mine to make. We all have our habits and I respect that. I just know that I don't like weed. It was actually one of the reasons I split with an ex, the one before the last one. Weed wasn't the only reason, but he knew I didn't like it and tried to hide it, etc., so some distrust was forming there, too. Even to this day, when dating, I ask about weed. No, Stone doesn't smoke it.

I believe that there is always compromise involved when forming new relationships, whether it be romantically, at the workplace, wherever. I feel comfortable enough to make my opinion heard, but also to respect others' differences, as I hope all of you will with mine here.

I can see all of us outside at my parents and whoever wants to go smoke weed just goes for a walk down the driveway. I may be sitting under the hospitality tent by myself for a half hour, but I still respect everyone's personal choices, esp my Queen's!