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9 Things No One Told Me About Pregnancy

I’ve always dreamed of being pregnant. To prepare myself for the future, I spent years soaking up every tidbit possible from gestating women. Since I (surprise!) found out I was pregnant on Halloween 2016 (perfect timing), I soon learned that most of my prenatal research was for naught. I knew nothing. There are certain things NO ONE ever told me. Here’s what I’ve learned during my first 18 weeks of pregnancy…

#1 My Pregnancy is Not Like My Mother’s…

If I’ve learned one thing, it’s that each pregnancy and baby is unique. My Mother never suffered from morning sickness, so my first trimester should have been hunky-dory, right? WRONG! I was completely blindsided by nausea/headache/vomiting for nine whole weeks! Uck!

#2 I Feel Isolated…

I never expected to feel isolated during pregnancy. After all, I’m carrying another human being in my uterus. Just to be clear, I’m definitely not alone. I have a wonderful family, great friends, and the world’s best fiance. However, I still feel terribly lonely at times, even when talking to other pregnant women. Perhaps this sense of isolation is God-given; a way to create a closer bond with my fiancé and baby. I recently told my mate that he’s the ONLY person who eases this isolated feeling. Even though he can’t fully understand my symptoms, this is our baby, our special project. This feeling is preparing us to be a family.

#3 I Feel Like I’m Living Behind a Pane of Glass…

This newfound sense of fragility is also isolating. Pregnancy is not a “condition” or weakness. It’s a completely natural, amazing miracle. However, I sometimes feel isolated by the things I can’t do. I’ve never been a smoker or drinker (and haven’t indulged in caffeine for years), but I’ve had to forgo high impact workouts, ice skating, and skiing. I think many women feel sad about these tiny sacrifices, but feel guilty for mentioning it. On that note…

#4 My “Motherly Guilt” Started at Conception…

I’d heard about the guilt that comes with motherhood, but never expected it to start the minute I found out I was pregnant. Had I worked out too hard? Had I eaten any unhealthy chemicals or food additives? Is it ok that my nails are painted??? Even worse, I felt guilty for being sad about morning sickness. I felt a constant need to clarify that I wasn’t sad about my pregnancy, just its debilitating symptoms.

#5 I Constantly Compare Myself to Others…

Comparisons are almost unavoidable. It’s weird how I suddenly see pregnant women everywhere, at the grocery store, shopping mall, and even in the media. Other women also love to regale me with stories of their pregnancies. Yesterday, a client gleefully informed me that she didn’t have to wear maternity clothes until she was eight months pregnant, then she proceeded to walk out of the hospital in her pre-pregnancy wardrobe. I’m not going to lie. I wanted to hit her.

#6 I Have Puberty Flashbacks…

Is that a stretch mark? Why are my boobs so big? Are my hips expanding? It’s like puberty all over again. Since this is my first pregnancy, I still don’t know how my body will respond to a growing baby. Every day is an adventure.

#7 I Compare My Baby to Fruit…

Anyone who has downloaded a gestation app knows that each week is marked by a fruit or vegetable that gives you a visual of how big baby has gotten. I find myself referring to my baby as the “little key lime” or “my head of lettuce”. Pregnancy in the 21st century is just plain bizarre.

#8 I Know Too Much…

Social media, apps, and other mothers dump information on me 24/7. I receive constant advertisements for baby/maternity gear that I probably don’t need (but I really want!). Being the research nut that I am, I fervently seek advice and soak up every peer-reviewed study I possibly can. I find myself burnt out and confused by conflicting information.

#9 I Don’t Recognize Myself…

I’ve had moments when I look in the mirror and don’t recognize myself. Oddly, this sensation came most often during the first trimester. Perhaps it was the tired, drawn look I adopted due to constant queasiness. Perhaps it was shock and disbelief that I was carrying a child. Either way, it’s a strange feeling. I can only imagine how I’ll feel in the third trimester!

It’s all Worth It…

The minute I heard our baby’s heartbeat, I forgot all about morning sickness, guilt, and anxiety about my expanding hips. This experience is new to me, and sometimes challenging, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

8 thoughts on “9 Things No One Told Me About Pregnancy”

Oh i can definitely relate! #4 especially. And the guilt continues afyer your little nugget is born, BUT youll learn how to accept it. Motherhood is hard, but worth every struggle! Great article as always!

Take some advice from and “older” mama whose “baby” is 17…. Ditch the overabundance of info and trust.your.gut. You are the momma. There is no one on earth more qualified to know what is right or wrong in pregnancy and parenting than you are with your own child. God put that in us. Trust it. And Him.😀

As different as pregnancies are from woman to woman, I relate a lot to what you wrote. The worst symptom I had so far and no one warned me about were the mood swings. I bookmarked an article called “How to not hate your husband”. I felt misunderstood and lonely and snapped at everything. It all passed with the second trimester, luckily.