Domino’s Strips Jean Georges Dessert of Its Last Remaining Shred of Dignity

Ever since Jean-Georges Vongerichten introduced molten chocolate cake to America some two decades ago, it has spread like, well, molten chocolate all over the nation’s menus, and now it has finally reached its nadir. Domino’s has introduced the Chocolate Lava Crunch Cake, no doubt dreamed up by the fudge-packers at the fictional “Domino’s Pizza Institute.” But wait, there’s more! You can now get this for free if you order their other recent blechtacular creation, the bread bowl. Why are we telling you this? Well, because it’s fast-food day. And also, probably for the same reason your friend showed you that “Faces of Death” video in middle school — we had to look at this, so now you have to.