The Yoga of Real Life

How NOT to make decisions based in fear

This post might not be particularly yogic, but I felt like putting pen to paper.. er, fingers to keyboard.

Today is the one year anniversary of me moving to a small, rural town in the middle of nowhere Ontario. It was a decision made out of love and/or fear (when do they ever not go together) to live with my partner. And I’ve had a lot of mixed emotions about it.

I grew up in rural areas so its not rural areas that I dislike, its just this one in particular. Its the kind of place that has no physical redeeming qualities, no amenities and its just far enough away from everything that every car trip is a real journey.

We had a reason to stay before, my partner’s job. But we don’t have that anymore – we are free to move wherever you want.

However, we are choosing to stay in a place we both hate.

How did we come to this decision? We did a classic pro/cons list. It became clear that even though we didn’t particularly like anything about the town, we liked having our own space and independence (one of our alternate options was moving in with our parents).

This might be a ‘everything has a silver lining’ kind of anniversary, but I will spare you the cliche. Despite pretty much hating everything about the last year, I am strangely content with the decision we have made to stay.

Why?

Because it makes the most sense for us right now. Or maybe its because I actually had a say this go-round (my partner had already lived here for a couple months before I moved in). I still may not like where I live, but I made the decision to stay. No one is forcing me too, which puts the ball back into my metaphorical court.

Anytime you make a decision, you are taking control of your situation. Even if its not the most optimal decision for you right now, it is one step closer to getting you where you need to go. Because you are always in the driver’s seat.

Do you have any pending decisions in your life? Rather than feeling fear or anxiety, can you feel empowered by your ability to make a choice for your life? I’d love to hear about it in the comments.