Cameron Mulling Plan to Mark E.U. Citizens With Stars

British Prime Minister David Cameron is considering appealing to a Euroskeptic public with a plan force to non-British E.U. nationals resident in the U.K. to wear a European flag badge outside their clothing, The Daily Currant can reveal.

According to a draft document, the Conservative Party has crafted a rule decreeing that Europeans from other countries must affix a biometric passport featuring the 12-starred E.U. logo to their lapels when appearing in public places. Those who do not comply would face deportation to their home countries.

Sources within Whitehall say the move is designed to reduce illegal immigration by clearly distinguishing illegals from E.U. immigrants who - by force of European treaty - have nearly unlimited rights to live and work in Britain.

But critics - including some within the ruling coalition - see it as a thinly veiled attempt to stigmatize and harass EU nationals in hopes they will quit the U.K.

Keep Calm and Ferry On

Liberal Democrat MP Tom Brake, who was raised and schooled in France, says the government's plans smacks of xenophobia and racism

"This plan is outrageous," Blake insists, "Immigration from Europe is vital to the economic and cultural dynamism of the United Kingdom. If we go further down the path of Europhobia, Britian will be lonely desolate island of inward-looking bigots."

However, the idea is drawing rapturous praise from some Conservative MPs and top UK Independence Party officials.

"You're average Continental doesn't bathe, and is easily distinguished from a Brit by their distinctive smell," explains Paul Nuttall, deputy leader of UKIP, "But for the few Euros who do bathe, this badge will help us identify them and keep our children out of their reach."

"Its a start," Nuttall adds, "But I won't be happy until every last one them is on a ferry to Calais,"

Such views - once considered extreme in Britain - are echoed even by some ministers within the ruling Conservative Party.

"If we can't get rid of them,at least this way we know where they are," says Peter Mannion, Minister for Social Affairs and Citizenship, "But what do we really need the French, Italians, and Dutch here for anyway? I can live without croissant shops, crime, and whores."

The measure is expected to be voted upon next month on the 26th anniversary of the Single European Act's signing. If passed it is expected to elicit a strongly-worded letter of condemnation from Brussels over its flagrant violation of European law.