I found this post yesterday and it’s utterly hilarious. I had to post it on MTB Shorts!

Tutorial on how to ride in a skirt:
Many women are scared to ride in a skirt. What if the wind blows wrong? What do you do when you’re going fast downhill? What if your bike isn’t a step through (which, by the way, neither mine nor Anna’s are)? Here are the tips and tricks for maintaining your dignity whilst wearing the skirt and enjoying your ride.

1. Pick your skirt- pencil skirts are never a good idea on a bike with no step through. You are looking at your skirt riding up and constantly pulling and tugging. A-lines, looser cotton skirts and mini skirts are best. Long skirts work if you have a skirt guard and chain guard (which I don’t). Dresses are also a great idea because you are not worrying about the back riding up too much and showing rear end cleavage (the worst kind of cleavage).

2.How to get on the bike-this is assuming you are riding a regular bike with no fancy step through. Step one: stand to the side of the bike. Step two: squeeze your knees together. Step three: lift your leg, keeping your knees as close together as you can. Standing on your tip toes is also a big help. You can give yourself extra protection by holding the centre of the skirt down. Step four: at this point, you should be straddling the bike. In order to keep the skirt down it is best to put one foot up on a pedal. Tilt the bike a bit and you are good to go. Do this all in reverse to get off gracefully.

3. Riding in a skirt-ride as normal, keeping your legs close to the bike (something you should be doing anyway) and keeping one leg down while the other is up during coasting moments. For going downhill, I find that standing up keeps the wind from making you less than modest.

4. Leggings or shorts really help-I will wear a pair of leggings or cycling shorts if I am going a very long distance or am at all uncomfortable. This keeps you covered AND allows the fabric to slide up nicely as opposed to bunching up and riding up uncontrollably. Also-no thongs. This is just asking for trouble. Not to mention, unsanitary. Ick…

5. Have fun-sometimes you will flash. It is inevitable. When that happens, throw your head back and laugh. It really is quite funny! Also remember that with all the biking you are doing, your legs probably look amazing so flaunt them.

Wow, how things change so fast! Just last year, Rachel Atherton was on top of the world after winning the dowhill world championship in Italy. This year, she’s spent the entire season healing after her collision with a pick-up truck during a training session (Pick-up truck 1 Atherton 0).

The crash forced her to undergo surgery on her shoulder in May, but it’s still too unstable for her to race and she needs more time to build up the supporting muscles.

Atherton has said that she is disappointed to miss the season and only wanted more success after last year, but acknowledges that she’ll have to wait until 2010 to get back on the bike.

We’re holding thumbs for you, girl. Come back stronger than before and show these other riders how a champion does it!

Like the dreadful penalty-taking from Michael Carrick, so are the days of our mountain bikes…

In today’s episode of Days of our Mountain Bikes titled ‘It’s coming’, SexyShorts66 doesn’t come online for weeks, when suddenly, out of the blue, she pops up on the laptop screen and asks Mike to meet her at a secret location. Mike is reluctant at first, but when she tells him that she has an MTB gift for him, he agrees. Is this a trap?

There is still no sign of Tobias and Whitney – it seems like they’ve vanished from the earth or have they?

Diana fights off Petro with a heavy elbow to his stomach. Out of nowhere, Sanchez runs out and tackles Petro, he turns to Diana and says, “Grab Hel-Met and run! Hide in any dark building!” Diana does as she’s told and grabs her adopted son, and they run for their lives as Petro and Sanchez fight to the death. Will they be safe and what will happen to Sanchez and Petro?

If you can remember, the MTB Shorts team recently previewed the Nando’s Magalies Adventure event, and today I have the pleasure of bringing you the news and results from the event.

In what best can be described as a whitewash, The Toyota Supercycling team of Shan Wilson and Andrew McLean won all 3 stages and took the overall victory at the Nando’s Magalies Adventure at the weekend.

And if Toyota Supercycling didn’t prove their dominance enough, their other team of David Labuschagne and Tinus Buys took second place ahead of Martin Hogan and Karl Kielblock.

It looks like Toyota is getting some quality dynamos in MTB. Now, if only I could get that sort of performance from my 1997 Toyota Tazz. Oh well, I guess it’s maybe time for me to upgrade to a Yaris hehe

MTB Shorts decided to finally conduct a REAL interview! We managed to get hold of up-and-coming writer and journalist Sergio Pereira and find out his views on MTB!

Mark: Hi Sergio, thank you so much for taking some time out to chat to MTB Shorts.Sergio: It’s only a pleasure, Mark. Thanks for the opportunity.

Mark: So Sergio, how involved are you in the MTB scene?Sergio: To tell the truth, I’m not an active cyclist or a full-time “cycling writer”, but I’ve actually done quite a few articles on MTB and it’s actually been very interesting. It’s completely different from your typical soccer, rugby and cricket articles – it’s more about fitness and strategy, than actual personalities.

Mark: Yes, that’s very true. MTB is a completely new ballgame. Have you ever been to an MTB event?Sergio: Yes, I have. I’ve actually been to quite a few Northern Farm events and even managed to get lost on the course a couple of times haha.

Mark: Oh we’ve gotten lost there so many times! Tell us what have you been writing lately?Sergio: I’ve completed a couple of articles for DESTINY MAN magazine, which I think is on sale today, and I’ve just finished an interview with an Australian band, HorrorWood Mannequins, for Music Review. Besides that, I’ve just finished writing my second book. I write way too much haha.

Mark: Thanks for your time, Sergio. How can our readers get hold of you, if they need some writing done or want to see some of your work?Sergio: They can follow me on Twitter at www.twitter.com/scpereira and they can drop me a mail at skullandtones@hotmail.com. Once again, thanks for this opportunity and keep up with the entertaining MTB Shorts posts.

I had the biggest chuckle yesterday as I read the news about Tour de France winner, Alberto Contador.

Recently, Contador has been getting some rather fruitful offers from rival teams, which has prompted him to come out and say he’d like to start afresh and with a new challenge.

However, his team Astana has warned any potential suitors that he will have to honour his contract until the end of 2010 and they won’t allow him to leave until then.

Man, this sounds a friend’s recent divorce. Him and his ex wife fought for months in court over their son Barry. Barry wanted to live with his dad, but his mom wanted him to live with her. It all ended up in court and it was such an ugly experience for the poor boy to endure.

Maybe Contador is a little like Barry in this situation. I expect plenty of tears and drama soon. Damn road cycling hehehe

Mark: Hi John, thank you so much for chatting to MTB Shorts.John: Cool, cool. Thanks for having me around to discuss some cyclenomics!

Mark: Cyclenomics…interesting word. So how did you get into mountain biking?John: I always used to ride my bike to school and eventually decided to become a member of the chain gang when I had spare time over the weekends, in between pumping iron and rapping with Vanilla Ice.

Mark: Do any of the other superstars do MTBing?John: No ways! Those guys are always on the injured list. If they just see a bike near them, they freak and drop to the floor calling for the EMTs.

Mark: But if the other superstars did join you on the track one day, what would you do?John: I’d give them an attitude adjustment with a little bit of a 5km shuffle and then taunt them by waving my hand in front of my face and saying ‘you can’t see me’!

Mark: Thanks for your time, John. Good luck for your future battles ahead.John: It’s ah-right. I’ll be seeing you at Summerslam in…