Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Amy (out of nowhere): I think the TV might be hurting the babies. I'm going to look it up on the internet when we get home.Me: Well, I'm sure you won't find anything alarmist about it on the internet.

After five minutes on Google...

Amy: Oh my god, TV melts babies brains.Me: Like, melts them in a good way, right?Amy: Every hour watching TV increases their risk of getting ADHD by 10%.Me: Doesn't that mean that watching ten hours of TV would give them a 100% chance? We probably gave them ADHD just yesterday.Amy: No more TV for the babies.Me: Until when?Amy: I don't know. Seven.Me: That's four hours from now!Amy: No, until they're seven.Long silence.Me: So, where will they live?

Kyle Killen...

... writes fiction and other nonsense. His work has appeared in Mcsweeney's, Salon.com, The Mid-American Review, The Berkley Fiction Review, The Black Warrior Review, and numerous other places ending in the word Review. He previously wrote letters to gestating children and even won an award once.

He now lives with a large number of women and cats, which is exactly as hip and exciting as you think it sounds.