Eggo Recall Upsets ‘Stranger Things’ Fans, Recently Divorced Dads

We’ve let waffles get away with it for too long. From the old-fashioned kind, which make hilarious/disgusting farting noises when you put them in a waffle iron, to the frozen variety, which, for whatever else you can say about them, are the quickest-cooking syrup delivery vehicles out there, it’s high time we dealt with this lurking menace.

Eggo, the most popular brand of frozen waffles in America, has confirmed all our worst fears. According to the Kellogg Company, the manufacturer of Eggo, approximately 10,000 cases of “Kellogg’s® Eggo® Nutri-Grain® Whole Wheat Waffles” will be voluntarily recalled due to “the potential to be contaminated with Listeria monocytogenes” — a common food-borne pathogen.

The statement from the Kellogg Company says that so far they have received no reports of illness, but they’re doing this as a preventative measure. It goes on to say that “no other Eggo products are impacted by this recall,” and the product was distributed in 25 states. Check out their site to see if the Eggos you have in your freezer are on the list.

Our video on the subject above mostly deals with the main reason this is trending news: because Eggos are in Stranger Things, and everyone is talking about Stranger Things right now. (Seriously, did you see those li’l monsters at the Emmys? They were adorable!)

But as someone who ate a whole lot of frozen waffles after my parents got divorced, I know who this really affects. And that’s recently divorced dads.

Put yourself in a recently divorced dad’s shoes. You’re at the supermarket, buying breakfast for the kids. You need to get them something that’s not too unhealthy, or your ex will find out and think you’re trying to buy their favor. But it also needs to be quick, easy, and appealing to their unformed palates. How about frozen waffles? Better yet, whole grain frozen waffles? Surely your ex can’t complain about those, right?

Well, now your ex can complain, because you might’ve poisoned the poor kids. Sucks to be you.

What do you think? Has your trust in the frozen waffle industry eroded? Are you still angry at your ex for making you sell the house? Let us know in the comments below or at @WhatsTrending on Twitter!