Okay, this is pretty sad. I have been playing Mr. Mom while my wife, Rose, is away visiting family in Texas. We have a family tradition of eating subs on Sunday afternoons. The local Subway is just a half mile down the road. Rose has all our favorite orders memorized. She calls the Subway store after church, places the order, and we pick up the subs for lunch.

Well, Rose is away, and yesterday I was trying to get the boys’ orders just right, and it was all just so confusing, when suddenly I had this brilliant idea. That’s right. I called Rose in Texas, gave her the number of the Subway down the street and had her call in the order for us. Fifteen minutes later we were all sitting around the table enjoying our favorite subs. “See boys?” I said. “Just like Mom.” “Dad,” they replied, “that was Mom!”

I know. I am a pathetic Mr. Mom. But Mrs. Mom comes home tomorrow. Good things come to those who wait.

I had just gotten back from church that morning. I didn’t take my cell phone, and I noticed that there were six missed calls from Ray. What was the emergency?!? I knew one of our sons had a high fever the night before. And with worry, I called Ray.

The first thing he says, “Can you write this number down?” So I did and then I asked why, and he said, “It’s Subway. Can you order our subs for us? I just don’t know how to do it.” So all the way from Los Fresnos, Texas, just a few miles from Mexico, I ordered their subs to be picked up just a few minutes away from Ray and the boys.

My parents were waiting for me to start our lunch, and I told them what happened. My dad laughed and my mom very solemnly said in Spanish, “No hay nadie como la mamá.” (“There is no one like Mom.”)