what are your childs behaviors?

Was curious as to those on the spectrum with behavior problems what are they? My child 3 1/2 is very smart , intelligent, loving etc. But we are always walking on eggshells lately. If we ask him to stay with us when crossing road he puts his head down and sometimes gives us a glare and wont look at us for a long time after that, he just cant be told. He holds grudges for long periods of time even if we just show him what to do instead of telling him what not to do but that doesnt work either. If we look at him sometimes it sets him off. He normally craves eye contact and wants all the attention,thinks that everything that happens is about him whether good or bad just he thinks the world is about and revolves around him. He cant share but everyone else should share with him, he can take food from others plates but when someone takes from him he says "hey hey" and is mad. Everything is a battle, we try to work around making him happy and its not working. We tried ignoring it and he will just keep ignoring us, he is very hyper but when angry can stand and not looking at anyone from long periods. I just need to know if anyone else has experienced this with their child and is it autism or adhd/bipolar? His dev pedi thinks possible ADHD but no label yet. He is obsessed with food too, and doesnt show his true colors his moods change within a second usually he doesnt show people how he treats me. He puts on an act of being sweet to me then the person leaves and he is back to being mad at me. I dont need advice to help him cause i have been trying everything i get lots of advice already but just want to know if anyone ever experienced this with their child.

I've not had experience like this with a child, but with an adult who has narcissistic personality disorder. But he is an adult.

The only thing as far as experience is my 6 yo with PDD-NOS has a hypervigilance/oppositional behavior to being shown things or how to play with interactive toys or a book. He will brush my hands away with his hands and feet. At one point he may start screaming and work himself up. It is really difficult to feel like it's doing any good but I keep trying to teach and show him things without getting him too upset. He is extremely self-directed.