Donald Trump Proves (Again) That He’s The Troll In Chief

I don’t need to tell you that Donald Trump is a troll who happens to be occupying the most powerful chair in the free world. You know this already. You know this like saying Dwayne Wayne knew he had to step in and save Whitley Gilbert from marrying the founder of B613 (he had to). You know this like attempting to trust someone else’s potato salad (you don’t do it). The President makes a habit, every morning, to not only watch state news to regurgitate their talking points but also attempt to Jedi Mind Trick people into believing that he didn’t do something that we very quickly saw him blatantly do. Like clockwork.

The latest troll move from the guy with orange skin occurred in the wake of his summit with the parents of those children who’ve lost their lives in school shootings, spearheaded by last week’s school shooting in Parkland, Florida. A parent who lost his daughter said that we should have “fixed this.” Another student who shared text messages between him and his brother as they both feared for their lives echoed that stricter gun control was a necessity to prevent another school shooting.

And then, like clockwork, someone decided to suggest that maybe arming teachers would be a bright idea. And then, much like clockwork and your cousin hitting you up over some money after you remind him he still hasn’t paid you back, Trump thought it was a good idea to arm teachers.

“If you had a teacher who was adept with the firearm, they could end the attack very quickly,” he said, stating that schools could arm up to 20% of their teachers to stop “maniacs” who may try and attack them.

“This would be obviously only for people who were very adept at handling a gun, and it would be, it’s called concealed carry, where a teacher would have a concealed gun on them. They’d go for special training and they would be there and you would no longer have a gun-free zone,” Trump said. “Gun-free zone to a maniac — because they’re all cowards — a gun-free zone is ‘let’s go in and let’s attack because bullets aren’t coming back at us.’ “

Now, because I grew up learning the meaning of context clues and synonyms, I understood that he’s suggesting that it would be cool, perhaps smart even, to arm teachers in case another school shooting event takes place. One, as it was debunked earlier, it would cost taxpayers one billion dollars in order to fund such training. Two, “concealed carry where a teacher would have a concealed gun on them” is EFFECTIVELY SAYING GIVE TEACHERS GUNS.

But no, apparently we misheard him. Let us go to the almighty Twitter feed…

I never said “give teachers guns” like was stated on Fake News @CNN & @NBC. What I said was to look at the possibility of giving “concealed guns to gun adept teachers with military or special training experience – only the best. 20% of teachers, a lot, would now be able to

….immediately fire back if a savage sicko came to a school with bad intentions. Highly trained teachers would also serve as a deterrent to the cowards that do this. Far more assets at much less cost than guards. A “gun free” school is a magnet for bad people. ATTACKS WOULD END!

Wait. Let me check my notes, so I don’t have this wrong. “Concealed Carry” means the practice of carrying a handgun in public in a “concealed manner.” In short, it’s still giving teachers guns, just dressed up differently.

good morning, 45 is essentially rick james grinding his feet on eddie’s couch talking about he never said “give teachers guns.” pic.twitter.com/simz25JAG3

Never in my natural life did I expect to equate the person occupying the Oval Office to logic shared by one Rick James in discussing his interactions with Eddie Murphy, but here we are. Training our educators, the people we trust with our children after we dropped them off in the morning to be judge, jury and potential executioner if a school shooting takes place is asking more of them that we ever did in regards to a test or you know, educating our children.

For black and brown students, who is to say that any incident in which a student disagrees with their teacher doesn’t end with the student possibly being shot by the teacher? Or worse, what if in a scenario you have a student steal the gun from wherever it is locked in the classroom to shoot someone?

Solving gun violence by adding more guns is the worst type of addition in the world. And the President is suggesting that maybe it would be a good idea. We barely allow our educators to have salaries over $32,000 or even access the copy machine after 5 p.m. Why in the world would you train them the same way you do law enforcement?