History TooIncompetentToOperateABlanket / Advertising

** And in the [=MagneScribe=] commercial, the lady writes down an order for her first [=MagneScribe=] pen ''[[MindScrew with a MagneScribe pen]]''.

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** And in the [=MagneScribe=] commercial, the lady writes down an order for her first [=MagneScribe=] pen ''[[MindScrew with a MagneScribe pen]]''. It seems that once you've bought it the MagnaScribe will even return to you ''[[StableTimeLoop through time and space.]]''

** And [[http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2nqnlo?scrlybrkr=20b3f4cc here's one]] set to Music/TheBeatles.[[note]]Sadly, the original video on [=YouTube=], uploaded by the actual creator of the video, was taken down for copyright.[[/note]]

* The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuFvGDj-9Wc Star Shower Motion Laser Light]] is supposed to be an "easy" solution to the hassle of decorating the outside of the house at Christmas time, but the ad shows a man pulling an extra-large sphere of regular string Christmas lights from a box that have been tangled together. Anybody that know the proper way to put away Christmas lights at the end of the season never has a problem with tangled lights come next Christmas. Also the ad show a man reaching dangerously beyond his ladder trying to decorate his house with regular string lights by simply throwing them over, and almost into, the gutter. Maybe it's better if that guy does not try climbing a ladder for any reason.

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* The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuFvGDj-9Wc Star Shower Motion Laser Light]] is supposed to be an "easy" solution to the hassle of decorating the outside of the house at Christmas time, but the ad shows a man pulling an extra-large sphere of regular string Christmas lights from a box that have been tangled together. Anybody that know knows the proper way to put away Christmas lights at the end of the season never has a problem with tangled lights come next Christmas. Also the ad show a man reaching dangerously beyond his ladder trying to decorate his house with regular string lights by simply throwing them over, and almost into, the gutter. Maybe it's better if that guy does not try climbing a ladder for any reason.

* The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuFvGDj-9Wc Star Shower Motion Laser Light]] is supposed to be an "easy" solution to the hassle of decorating the outside of the house at Christmas time, but the ad shows a man pulling an extra-large sphere of regular strong Christmas lights from a box that have been tangled together. Anybody that know the proper way to put away Christmas lights at the end of the season never has a problem with tangled lights come next Christmas. Also the ad show a man reaching dangerously beyond his ladder trying to decorate his house with regular string lights by simply throwing them over, and almost into, the gutter. Maybe it's better if that guy does not try climbing a ladder for any reason.

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* The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuFvGDj-9Wc Star Shower Motion Laser Light]] is supposed to be an "easy" solution to the hassle of decorating the outside of the house at Christmas time, but the ad shows a man pulling an extra-large sphere of regular strong string Christmas lights from a box that have been tangled together. Anybody that know the proper way to put away Christmas lights at the end of the season never has a problem with tangled lights come next Christmas. Also the ad show a man reaching dangerously beyond his ladder trying to decorate his house with regular string lights by simply throwing them over, and almost into, the gutter. Maybe it's better if that guy does not try climbing a ladder for any reason.

* In another case of burying the lead, the [[https://youtu.be/wed9xtPl5a0 No Spill Chill]], which looks pretty good for when freezer space is at a premium, but instead wastes most of its time waving ice cube trays around.

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* In another case of burying the lead, the [[https://youtu.be/wed9xtPl5a0 No Spill Chill]], which looks pretty good for when freezer space is at a premium, but instead wastes most of its time waving ice cube trays around.around.* The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuFvGDj-9Wc Star Shower Motion Laser Light]] is supposed to be an "easy" solution to the hassle of decorating the outside of the house at Christmas time, but the ad shows a man pulling an extra-large sphere of regular strong Christmas lights from a box that have been tangled together. Anybody that know the proper way to put away Christmas lights at the end of the season never has a problem with tangled lights come next Christmas. Also the ad show a man reaching dangerously beyond his ladder trying to decorate his house with regular string lights by simply throwing them over, and almost into, the gutter. Maybe it's better if that guy does not try climbing a ladder for any reason.

* Mocked by Game Trailer's ads for their XBox app, which show flailing individuals too inept to move their fingers out of the way to watch a video on their phone. Cut to the video watchers celebrating their new power to watch the videos on their TV, one of them wearing a Snuggie.

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* Mocked by Game Trailer's ads for their XBox UsefulNotes/XBox app, which show flailing individuals too inept to move their fingers out of the way to watch a video on their phone. Cut to the video watchers celebrating their new power to watch the videos on their TV, one of them wearing a Snuggie.

* The commercial for [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoG0vv-twCA Butter Express]] begins with a video of someone failing to spread butter on toast without completely destroying the toast.

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* The commercial for [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoG0vv-twCA Butter Express]] begins with a video of someone failing to spread butter on toast without completely destroying the toast.toast.* In another case of burying the lead, the [[https://youtu.be/wed9xtPl5a0 No Spill Chill]], which looks pretty good for when freezer space is at a premium, but instead wastes most of its time waving ice cube trays around.

* ''Website/{{Cracked}}'' offers a few more examples in their article [[http://www.cracked.com/article_15768_as-seen-on-tv-10-most-laughably-misleading-ads.html "As Seen on TV: The 10 Most Laughably Misleading Ads."]] Who'd have thought that ''capping a normal pen'' could be so hard? The commercial cheats by using a cap that is so chewed up that it's unusable. The commercial in question is for the [=MagneScribe=] pen. It shows a girl flailing around under a piece of furniture for her fallen pen, displaying both the poor vision and limited arm span of a T. rex. Of course, the [=MagneScribe=] pen can't fall out of your hand; if you drop it the pen will come flying back through the air and re-attach itself to the magical pendant. Now it sells for $30, which the article notes is enough money that you could easily buy '''''three hundred''''' regular pens with.

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* ''Website/{{Cracked}}'' offers a few more examples in their article [[http://www.cracked.com/article_15768_as-seen-on-tv-10-most-laughably-misleading-ads.html "As Seen on TV: The 10 Most Laughably Misleading Ads."]] Who'd have thought that ''capping a normal pen'' could be so hard? The commercial cheats by using a cap that is so chewed up that it's unusable. The commercial in question is for the [=MagneScribe=] pen. It shows a girl flailing around under a piece of furniture for her fallen pen, displaying both the poor vision eyesight of a mole and limited the arm span of a T. rex.''T. rex''. Of course, the [=MagneScribe=] pen can't fall out of your hand; if you drop it the pen will come flying back through the air and re-attach itself to the magical pendant. Now it sells for $30, which the article notes is enough money that you could easily buy '''''three hundred''''' regular pens with.

* There's a commercial for a set of kitchen containers in which you can use each container as a lid to hold more food. Of course, you have to show that you just just don't have enough room'' in a regular flat-lid container. So they show a woman trying to put spaghetti into a normal container. She has, in complete knowledge that there is not enough room in the container, piled on about a quarter of the container's volume of spaghetti ON TOP of the completely full container, and then acts ''surprised'' when it goes everywhere when she puts the flat lid on.

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* There's a commercial for a set of kitchen containers in which you can use each container as a lid to hold more food. Of course, you have to show that you just just ''just don't have enough room'' in a regular flat-lid container. So they show a woman trying to put spaghetti into a normal container. She has, in complete knowledge that there is not enough room in the container, piled on about a quarter of the container's volume of spaghetti ON TOP ''on top'' of the completely full container, and then acts ''surprised'' when it goes everywhere when she puts the flat lid on.

** And in the [=MagneScribe=] commercial, the lady writes down an order for her first [=MagneScribe=] pen with... [[MindScrew a Magne]][[TheyJustDidntCare Scribe pen.]]

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** And in the [=MagneScribe=] commercial, the lady writes down an order for her first [=MagneScribe=] pen with... [[MindScrew ''[[MindScrew with a Magne]][[TheyJustDidntCare Scribe pen.]]MagneScribe pen]]''.

* The spaghetti strainer thing that makes pouring hot water out of a deep pot look like brain surgery. Most spaghetti-cooker ads do this. It's especially ridiculous when they are clearly and deliberately pouring outside the reach of the colander. Sometimes, the sink inexplicably ends up full of dirty pots and pans when doing things the old way. The best example would be the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbA9KAc5gZs Pasta Pro]]. The sad thing is that the Pasta Pro actually seems like a clever idea (one less dish to wash), but the execution fails spectacularly (it fits gas AND electric stoves? Amazing!). Plus, according to customer reviews, there are numerous design flaws with it: The locking mechanism sometimes fails, steam can cause the lid to expand and become permanently stuck to the pot, and the red paint can flake off and ''contaminate the food.''

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* The spaghetti strainer thing that makes pouring hot water out of a deep pot look like brain surgery. Most spaghetti-cooker ads do this. It's especially ridiculous when they are clearly and deliberately pouring outside the reach of the colander. Sometimes, the sink inexplicably ends up full of dirty pots and pans when doing things the old way. The best example would be the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rbA9KAc5gZs Pasta Pro]]. The sad thing is that the Pasta Pro actually seems like a clever idea (one less dish to wash), but the execution fails spectacularly (it fits gas AND ''and'' electric stoves? Amazing!). Plus, according to customer reviews, there are numerous design flaws with it: The locking mechanism sometimes fails, steam can cause the lid to expand and become permanently stuck to the pot, and the red paint can flake off and ''contaminate the food.''

** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GR1YD1uq3Eo These ads]] begin with a woman who drops something supposedly because she's using one of those old-fashioned oven mitts, but anyone who's ever used an oven will recognize that she "dropped" the thing because she only used one hand. The commercial is trying to imply that she could have held the item securely with one hand if she'd only been wearing the Ove-Glove, but two normal mitts cost less than a single Ove-Glove. Meanwhile, the fakery extends in the other direction as a woman effortlessly moves hot cookies using her new Ove-Glove, and then one of her children picks up one of these supposedly hot cookies bare-handed and takes a bite (say goodbye to your taste buds, kid). The Ove-Glove is apparently so amazing it protects people that aren't even wearing it.

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** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GR1YD1uq3Eo These ads]] begin with a woman who drops something supposedly because she's using one of those old-fashioned oven mitts, but anyone who's ever used an oven will recognize that she "dropped" the thing because she only used one hand. The commercial is trying to imply that she could have held the item securely with one hand if she'd only been wearing the Ove-Glove, but two normal mitts cost less than a single Ove-Glove. Meanwhile, the fakery extends in the other direction as a woman effortlessly moves hot cookies using her new Ove-Glove, and then one of her children picks up one of these supposedly hot the "hot" cookies bare-handed and takes a bite (say goodbye to your taste buds, kid). The Ove-Glove is apparently so amazing it protects people that aren't even wearing it.

* [[CableSatelliteMudslinging Both Cable and Satellite TV]] sell their service by using utter incompetence to demonstrate the competitor's equipment. (Never mind that both satellite and cable have only one cable that runs to the back of the [=TV=] from the wall, digital cable often uses the same boxes as digital satellite, and that the remote controls are virtually identical. The complications arise in hooking up ''the rest of the peripherals'', like [=DVD=] players, game consoles, the sound system...)

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* [[CableSatelliteMudslinging Both Cable and Satellite TV]] sell their service by using utter incompetence to demonstrate the competitor's equipment. (Never mind that both satellite and cable have only one cable that runs to the back of the [=TV=] from the wall, digital cable often uses the same boxes as digital satellite, and that the remote controls are virtually identical. The complications arise in hooking up ''the rest the ''rest'' of the peripherals'', like peripherals, e.g., [=DVD=] players, game consoles, the sound system...)

* The person in the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KBXcpJfmj4 Big City Slider]] commercial trying to make normal burgers simply ''should not be allowed near a stove''. Note how he goes on and on about how you can actually put stuff on your slider after cooking them with the BCS Machine. Y'know, as if you couldn't already do that with a slider cooked the traditional way. For extra fun, when he says "Clean-up's a breeze!" the magic hands use a paper towel to dab delicately at a BCS Machine that has clearly never been used, ever. Fun fact: that's Creator/BillyMays with his sleeves rolled down. His superhuman abilities were apparently dependent on whether his sleeves were rolled up or not.* An ad for a device to unclog plumbing first shows a person trying to use a plumber's snake by repeatedly ramming it into the sink as though trying to stab the sink to death with it.* The commercial for a cordless soldering iron, which shows a man struggling to reach his project with a corded soldering iron, tugging futilely on the cord. He seems oblivious to the five feet of empty, perfectly-usable workbench space between the outlet the tool is plugged into, and the project he's attempting to work on. Or he's never heard of an extension cord.* An ad in which a woman, in an attempt to open plastic packaging, employs a chainsaw. The product in question was a clamshell package opener, [[Catch22Dilemma which came in a clamshell package]]. Oh, the irony.... (For the record, a decent pair of scissors will work just as well, and they can be found anywhere.)

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* The person in the [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9KBXcpJfmj4 Big City Slider]] commercial trying to make normal burgers simply ''should not be allowed near a stove''. Note how he goes on and on about how you can actually put stuff on your slider after cooking them with the BCS Machine. Y'know, as if you couldn't already do that with a slider cooked the traditional way. For extra fun, when he says "Clean-up's a breeze!" the magic hands use a paper towel to dab delicately at a BCS Machine that has clearly never been used, ever. Fun [[note]]Fun fact: that's Creator/BillyMays with his sleeves rolled down. His superhuman abilities were apparently dependent on whether his sleeves were rolled up or not.not.[[/note]]* An ad for a device to unclog plumbing first shows a person trying to use a plumber's snake by repeatedly ramming it into the sink as though trying to stab the poor sink to death with it.* The commercial for a cordless soldering iron, which shows a man struggling to reach his project with a corded soldering iron, tugging futilely on the cord. He seems oblivious to the five feet of empty, perfectly-usable workbench space between the outlet the tool is plugged into, into and the project he's attempting to work on. Or on, or he's never heard of an extension cord.* An ad in which a woman, in an attempt to open plastic packaging, employs a chainsaw. The product in question was a clamshell package opener, [[Catch22Dilemma which came in a clamshell package]]. Oh, the irony.... (For the record, a decent pair of scissors will work just as well, and they can be found anywhere.anywhere for much less money.)

** Even worse since the commercial acts as if your kids doing things like "yelling, backtalking, lying" are abnormal, a sign of them going down a horribly wrong path. While these are certainly not desirable behaviors, they are also ''completely normal'' for a teenager. So normal, in fact, that their ''absence'' would be a greater sign of them having a problem. * The [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2g4YBGn8i4 "Perfect Brownie pan"]] commercial opens with a woman who can't seem to use a spatula when trying to remove what one can only imagine must be cement brownies from a pan. She has apparently never heard of "greasing the pan" or lining brownie pans and cake tins with greaseproof paper, both of which are significantly easier and cheaper.

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** Even worse since the commercial acts as if your kids doing things like "yelling, backtalking, lying" are abnormal, a sign of them going down a horribly wrong path. While these are certainly not aren't desirable behaviors, they are also ''completely normal'' for a teenager. So teenager--so normal, in fact, that their ''absence'' would be a greater sign of them having a problem. * The [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g2g4YBGn8i4 "Perfect Perfect Brownie pan"]] pan]] commercial opens with a woman who can't seem to use a spatula when trying to remove what one can only imagine must be cement brownies from a pan. She has apparently never heard of "greasing the pan" or lining brownie pans and cake tins with greaseproof paper, both of which are significantly easier and cheaper.

** One of the best has to be an ad for a coffee maker. The potential buyers for this product will apparently want it not because of saved costs, or making their coffee exactly how they want it, or even just to save themselves a trip to the pretentious cafe. Oh no, it's because when you go to a coffee shop, you could run into those sliding electric doors. Yes, that is the pitch they start and end the commercial with: a bunch of poor schlubs who walk straight into the glass doors at the coffee shop; one lady even falls over backwards, spilling her coffee and smacking her head on the floor! If only they had stayed at home and made their own coffee! Yeah, no. If just walking into and out of the store sounds too dangerous for you, you are not allowed in the kitchen. You shouldn't even be allowed to hold a cup of hot coffee. Even worse: this commercial was in use to market a line of "cold brewed iced coffee in a carton" products.

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** One of the best has to be an ad for a coffee maker. The potential buyers for this product will apparently want it not because of saved costs, or making their coffee exactly how they want it, or even just to save themselves a trip to the pretentious cafe. Oh no, it's because when you go to a coffee shop, you could run into those sliding electric doors. Yes, that is the pitch they start and end the commercial with: a bunch of poor schlubs who walk straight into the glass doors at the coffee shop; one lady even falls over backwards, spilling her coffee and smacking her head on the floor! If only they had stayed at home and made their own coffee! Yeah, no. If just walking into and out of the store sounds too dangerous for you, you are not allowed in the kitchen. You kitchen, and you shouldn't even be allowed to hold a cup of hot coffee. Even worse: this commercial was in use to market a line of "cold brewed iced coffee in a carton" products.

* A minor example: An ad for Swiffer dusters shows a person using an ordinary feather duster... by pounding it up and down on various surfaces, kicking up an unbelievable cloud of dust. Has any one in history used a feather duster in this fashion? I don't think Mr. Series/{{Monk}} would be pleased.

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* A minor example: An ad for Swiffer dusters shows a person using an ordinary feather duster... by pounding it up and down on various surfaces, kicking up an unbelievable cloud of dust. Has any one in history used a feather duster in this fashion? I don't think Mr. Series/{{Monk}} would not be pleased.

* There's a commercial for a set of kitchen containers in which you can use each container as a lid to hold more food. Of course, you have to show that you just ''don't have enough room'' in a regular flat-lid container. So they show a woman trying to put spaghetti into a normal container. She has, in complete knowledge that there is not enough room in the container, piled on about a quarter of the container's volume of spaghetti ON TOP of the completely full container, and then acts ''surprised'' when it goes everywhere when she puts the flat lid on.

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* There's a commercial for a set of kitchen containers in which you can use each container as a lid to hold more food. Of course, you have to show that you just ''don't just don't have enough room'' in a regular flat-lid container. So they show a woman trying to put spaghetti into a normal container. She has, in complete knowledge that there is not enough room in the container, piled on about a quarter of the container's volume of spaghetti ON TOP of the completely full container, and then acts ''surprised'' when it goes everywhere when she puts the flat lid on.

* The My Li'l Reminder features an establishing clip of someone's senile grandma lost in a parking lot, trying to find her car. Not only does she seem to lack the memory, but also basic problem-solving skills to figure out where her car might be. But have no fear, thanks to this wonder-product, this little old lady too senile to have the faintest idea where she is or what she's doing is now free to drive a... OhCrap.

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* The My Li'l Reminder features an establishing clip of someone's senile grandma lost in a parking lot, trying to find her car. Not only does she seem to lack the memory, but also basic problem-solving skills to figure out where her car might be. But have no fear, thanks to this wonder-product, this little old lady too senile to have the faintest idea where she is or what she's doing is now free to drive a...OhCrap.

* There's a product called [[https://www.buyeasyfeet.com/ "Easy Feet."]] Apparently, now bending over to wash your feet is a horrifying task even for those lacking a physical problem to impair movement.** The problem with the ad is that it is really uneven. Half of the testimonials are marketing it as a spa product (it massages as it cleans and pumices calluses away), and the others market it as a convenience product (for those who have trouble bending over, like the handicapped or overweight). The testimonials kind of blend and it just makes it sound like everybody is too damn lazy to lean over. Oh, and they misspelled "heels."

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* There's a product called [[https://www.buyeasyfeet.com/ "Easy Feet."]] Apparently, now bending over to wash your feet is a horrifying task even for those lacking a physical problem to impair movement.** movement. The problem with the ad is that it is really uneven. Half of the testimonials are marketing it as a spa product (it massages as it cleans and pumices calluses away), and the others market it as a convenience product (for those who have trouble bending over, like the handicapped or overweight). The testimonials kind of blend and it just makes it sound like everybody is too damn lazy to lean over. Oh, and Also, they misspelled "heels."

* [[http://www.buyperfectpancake.com/ Perfect Pancake.]] The TV ad (shown on the embedded player on that webpage) begins with a black-and-white film of somebody trying and failing to flip a pancake in spectacular fashion, an aim that is so atrocious that you wonder, "do they also miss the bowl while pouring their morning cereal?"

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* [[http://www.buyperfectpancake.com/ Perfect Pancake.]] The TV ad (shown on the embedded player on that webpage) begins with a black-and-white film of somebody trying and failing to flip a pancake in spectacular fashion, an aim that is so atrocious that you might wonder, "do they also miss the bowl while pouring their morning cereal?"

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