10 Bizarre Crimes That Prove America Is Way Too Addicted To Fast Food

We all know fast food does criminal things to our bodies, but sometimes it even makes people commit crimes. We're not here to argue for a sodium/violent crime correlation, but we do want to delve a little deeper into the matter.

Christmas a time to sit back, relax and spend time with family. Or, it's the perfect time to burn down a Christmas tree in a blaze of glory at Denny's if your waiter takes too long to bring you the check. At least, that's what this guy did-- resulting in $150,000 in damages. Patience is a virtue, and it's also cheaper than arson.

2. When the price goes up, so does capital murder.

After yelling at the drive-thru worker who informed him that his favorite Taco Bell burrito had gone up in price, one man decided to turn his fast food run into a fast-track to jail time. The unnamed man apparently protested the price by shooting at the police with a BB gun, moving to an assault weapon and eventually ended things with a 3 1/2 hour standoff.

Sometimes, McDonald's employees put cheese on hamburgers. Sometimes, people assault said employees for doing this. In a case of "Biggest Overreaction Ever," Sean Varone went on a Mickey D's rampage at a Pennsylvania restaurant and hit an employee over a few slices of delicious dairy. Oh the humanity!

Deep in the Holy House of Chicken (Church's Chicken) one undiscovered disciple realized that money and prayer were not the answer -- robbing a fast-food chain was. Wielding an ancient fighting weapon, the man led employees to the cash register, grabbed the cash and walked off with it. No one was injured in the matter, but we're betting a lot of people were pretty baffled by the weapon.

6. Fries with a side of shotgun, ASAP.

Chris Brooks Heuring was trying to get fast food for his pregnant wife quickly and ended up getting more than a happy meal. Using a shotgun to enforce the "urgency of the situation" after he found out the drive-thru was closed, Heuring ended up going to jail (in addition to carrying a loaded weapon, Heuring was driving drunk) but worst of all -- we bet his hangry wife wasn't happy.

7. The Beach-N-Brawl combo, please.

Most people try to shy away from unhealthy food during bikini season, but after some time in the sand, one bikini-clad mother-of-four decided she needed a burger and fries, ASAP. Kimesa Smith had a "violent meltdown" (captured on camera) after workers were too slow with her order, so she started pulling hair and chucking water coolers.

8. Playing with (or throwing) your food is never the answer.

After one customer decided that he was upset with his drive-thru order, he went back to McDonald's, banged on all the windows and chucked his meal at a pregnant manager. The problem with being exceptionally rude and having a public breakdown over your meal is that sometimes, it ends in arrest and a breach of peace charge.

9. Lack of nuggets = plenty of fist fighting.

Usually, we feel this angry when McDonald's tell us they've stopped serving breakfast at 10:31 in the morning. Melodi Dushane had the opposite reaction, and demanded nuggets instead of hashbrowns. When she was met with a "no," Dushane used her fists instead of her words, punched the McDonald's drive-thru employee and ended up in court with a vandalism charge.

10. Possible public intoxication goes well with Jamaican food.

Though he insisted he was "not very drunk," Rob Ford -- the most famous mayor in the world-- had a moment of fast food weakness when he stumbled into a Jamaican restaurant for a little late night snack. Though he wasn't charged with public intoxication, we're pretty sure he would've been arrested considering he was badmouthing the police chief in his drunken rambling.

Major thanks to our friends at Giphy for helping create some awesome GIFs!

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Knoxville, Tenn. resident James Davis Wilson went into a rage in February of 2010 when the sundae he ordered at McDonald's was served with hot fudge on the bottom. He later punched an employee in the face in an argument stemming from the perceived injustice. He was later found guilty of misdemeanor assault and disorderly conduct. On top of a $1,050 fine, he also faces the possibility of a year in jail.

Shoplifter Marcus Banwell nearly got away with his theft from from a UK convenience store, but then he decided to chow down on his looted hot peppers. He didn't realize, it would seem, that they were Scotch Bonnet peppers -- some of the hottest on the planet. He was arrested after he began vomiting and shaking. Police found other stolen goods on his person, plus cocaine and heroin.
Photo by Flickr user aurélien.

Three woman who patronized a Red Lobster in St. Louis were accused of attacking a waitress, allegedly throwing water on her striking her with their hands and a menu. Sharrell Evans, Britley Green and Geneen Green were moved to anger because the waitress was, according to an onlooker, filling their water glasses too often. The women were charged with mob action and aggravated battery.

A McDonald's customer in Indiana "went into a violent rage" because she was dissatisfied with how McDonald's had stored her frozen ice cream cake.
The woman threw the cake, and then slapped the employee.
See the full post here.

Scott Shover, a 53-year-old man in Carlisle, Pennsylvania was caught eating raw meat off a Walmart shelf. He opened packages of raw ground beef and raw stew beef, ate a little beef and then put the packages back on the shelf.
A Walmart employee saw Shover, and a loss prevention officer and a store manager followed Shover outside and pointed him out to a police officer. He was arrested at taser point and charged with retail theft. The total loss of meat was valued at $24.53.
See the full post here.

Back in April, 19-year-old Lauren Jackson was told she was not welcome in a Victoria's Secret store in The Galleria mall in White Plains, NY due to an earlier shoplifting incident. Not pleased with the news, she dumped a container of chili on a display of panties. She ruined 65 pairs of underwear that were worth a total of $747.50.
Then, last week, she returned to the same store! An employee from another store recognized her and she was subsequently arrested. Jackson was charged with third-degree criminal mischief, a felony.
See the full post here.

Some meat aficionados would probably say that a great hamburger is better than drugs. And many drug-friendly carnivores would probably say that smoking marijuana makes any hamburger into a great hamburger. But it's not likely that either cohort would be happy if they ordered hamburgers and got marijuana -- or vice versa.
Indeed, a recent altercation in southern Florida shows just how badly such a mix-up can go.
According to TCPalm.com, 22-year-old Port St. Lucie native Timethy Delarrance Morrison thought he'd bought $100 worth of marijuana when his dealer handed him a white bag. He opened the bag and found hamburger meat in place of the drugs. Morrison was furious; he took out a gun and tried to rob the dealer. The dealer sped away, so Morrison started shooting at his Volvo.
See the full post here.

Two women stole $400 worth of fine wine from a Pembroke Park, Florida liquor store. Their master heist was not actually so hard to accomplish--one woman acted as the lookout and the other shoved the wine up her skirt.
"She must have had something stuck in her skirt, because it went real easy," said store owner Paul Mouts.
See the full post here.

On July 12, after customer Jennifer Schwenker brought her service dog and autistic children to a McDonald's in Marietta, GA, manager manager Tiffany Denise Allen hit her in the face. Even though Schwenker explained that she was legally allowed to have a service dog inside, Allen berated Schwenker and followed her to the bathroom. Allen then punched Schwenker in the face in the parking lot.
Allen was charged with simple battery, simple assault fear and disorderly conduct. She no longer works at the restaurant.
See the full post here.

It was revealed a few years ago that the host of Food Network's Dinner Impossible, Robert Irvine, had faked his resume. Now, a faux celebrity chef faked (poorly) a non-sanctioned Food Network event titled "Dinner Impossible BBQ."
Leonard "Lenny" Ruebeck, 20, from New Castle, Delaware solicited nearly $10,000, at $35 per ticket, from Carneys Point, New Jersey residents. Ruebeck claimed the event would feature Bobby Flay, Paula Deen, Rachael Ray...and Robert Irvine. In publicizing the event, Ruebeck wore a Food Network chef's jacket and a medallion that he claimed to have won on Iron Chef.
Ruebeck taught cooking classes, despite not having many of the basic skills required of a chef. In fact, he completed only two quarters of work at the culinary program of The Art Institute of Philadelphia in 2010. Residents grew suspicious about Ruebeck's credentials and were able to confirm that Ruebeck had no association with the network.
Ruebeck will return all of the money.
See the full post here.

Melissa Rodriguez, the former pastry chef of the Oak Room is suing her former executive chef, Eric Hara, for sexual, physical and culinary harassment. Rodriguez's $25 million suit against Hara includes the following allegations:
-Hara would pick her up and throw her in the garbage can.
-He would pour food in her hair--heavy cream, chocolate sauce, honey.
-Rodriguez had to carry eggs in her shirt, and if she did something Hara didn't like, she would have to break them and rub them into her chest.
See the full post here.

After Andre Varciana of Swansea, Wales ate some chicken from KFC, he threw the bones across the road at some friends. A police officer in an unmarked car saw him and braked suddenly, resulting in four cars crashing into each other (see photos here). One car ended up on the roof of another and three people were slightly injured.
Varciana was brought to court but conditionally discharged and ordered to pay about $137 in court costs.
District judge Vivian Manning-Davies quipped, "It is the most bizarre case I think I have ever come across or heard about. To say it is unusual is an understatement."
See the full post here.

So you can imagine how surprised the two Jaffrey, N.H., police officers were when they witnessed former Dunkin' Donuts employee Christopher Hildreth allegedly add his personal blend of "nasal mucus" to their coffee order.
According to a Jaffrey Police Department affidavit acquired by The Smoking Gun, the 20-year-old server took the coffee cups into the back room after taking the order on June 19. The officers said that they found this "odd as they had never seen him go to the back of the store to make coffee in the past."
See the full post here.

There are now officially two ways for donuts to foil would-be criminals. If you've ever seen Chief Wiggum on The Simpsons, you know about the first way: donuts fuel late-night crime-fighting.
The second is a little more convoluted.
Last Wednesday night at 9, a trio of masked men entered a Dunkin' Donuts in Hyannis, MA, on Cape Cod, armed with knives and hatchets. They were looking for cash. When they saw that two employees were carrying a brown paper bag, they assumed it held money from the day's donut sales, so they demanded the bag. They took it and made their getaway--only to find that the bag was filled with donuts, not cash.
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A man is suing the Times Square Red Lobster, claiming that the restaurant refused to hire him since he is a convicted felon.
Robert Smith, 38, has spent more than a decade in prison for at least three counts of robbery. In February, he submitted an application to the chain and never heard back. On his fifth follow-up phone call, he reached manager Nicole McVaugh who told him "I'm sorry to have to give you this info, but in my position as manager I don't hire convicted felons."
See the full post here.

An ice cream truck driver is behind bars in southeastern Pennsylvania after he allegedly broke into his boss's home and attacked him with a baseball bat.
State police say 29-year-old Bernard Geisel had argued with the truck's owner over money before using the bat to smash his way into the man's Uniontown home late Tuesday.
See the full post here.

Four diners were burned at Ozona Blue Grilling Co., a Palm Harbor, Florida restaurant after a waiter accidentally added too much rum to the bananas foster dish he prepared. Two people were flown to Tampa General Hospital for treatment while an additional two guests were slightly burned and refused treatment.
Employees were quick to grab fire extinguishers and help a woman whose dress caught on fire, resulting in first- and second-degree burns. "It's going to be a long time for her to heal," said Palm Harbor Fire Rescue spokeswoman Liz Monforti.
See the full post here.

Two women stole about $600 worth of gourmet cheese from a Bend, Oregon Whole Foods by simply asking for a box and walking out of the store. Their bounty included a $300 wheel of nine-month aged Gouda, and two wheels of blue cheese worth $270.
It seems almost too easy. The women walk into the store, pick up the Gouda wheel and ask for a box, which an employee provides. They box up the wheel, snatch two wheels of blue cheese, one walks to the register and the other leaves with the dairy.
See the full post here.

King crab prices this year have reached a record high and the market is certainly noticing. On May 20, a trucker picked up 25,000 pounds of Russian King Crab from a Los Angeles cold storage warehouse to deliver to Seattle. But, the crab and the driver have disappeared, likely intentionally.
After the crab failed to arrive in Seattle, the trucking company that contracted the driver discovered that the truck driver was part of a fraud ring. It was learned that his insurance, driver's license and other documents were fake, though it remains unclear if the trucker knew in advance what he was hauling.
See the full post here.

Hoping to receive $10 worth of cocaine in exchange for Olive Garden salad in a to-go box, a Salt Lake City woman instead was charged with a third degree felony by an undercover police officer.
In addition to the salad, the woman also offered the officer $2, and vowed to return later with more money or Olive Garden gift cards. The officer was not persuaded and in addition to the felony, the woman was also charged with one count of attempted possession or use of a controlled substance and possession of drug paraphernalia (she had a glass pipe in her pocket), a class A misdemeanor.
See the full post here.