Hungry for More: Romantic Fantasies for Women - just published! With stories by Tiffany Reisz, Greta Christina, D.L. King and more. 21 fantasies, from "Kitchen Slut" to a cougar to Craigslist sex to BDSM to bukkake to watching two men get it on, and more!

I truly don't even know if I have the words. This is a series I've been submitting to since my very beginning in the erotica field. I got hand-written rejections from the series' first editor, Marcy Sheiner, that spurred me to be even more determined to break into the series. I have changed email addresses since so can't quote it directly, but after a few rejections, I got an email with "Doing the Dishes" in the subject line that said that Marcy wanted to publish that story of mine, my dishwashing fetish story. I was overjoyed, and that remains a favorite story. Other stories of mine have made it into the series under both Sheiner and the next editor, Violet Blue.

So it's still a little pinch-me surreal to have my name on the latest title, which has been rebranded to take out the calendar year and therefore make it a book that bookstores will want to keep on their shelves after December 31st. I took the responsibility of editing this book incredibly seriously. I consider this the culmination of my 11 years of erotica editing, both because this is a series with an avid readership, and because I hope it's one that women who may or may not read a lot of other erotica will pick up. I wanted it to be diverse in terms of sexuality, sexual orientation, sex between two people and more people, race, age and setting. To do that all within the word count I was given is a challenge; this book could easily have been twice the length, and out of the over 200 submissions I received, I had to make some very tough choices. But I did and I am so proud of the result and can't wait to share it with you.

Which brings me to...the book's official release date is January 12, 2016, but I will be buying 50 extra copies to send to those in the U.S. who are willing to review the book on Amazon.com. I will send those 50 people a free signed copy they'll receive by the end of 2015 in exchange for posting a review on Amazon by February 29, 2016. Sound good? Just fill in ALL FIELDS on this form (yes, I require you to have previously reviewed a book on Amazon so I know that all 50 copies are going to people who are eligible to review it there) and the first 50 people will get a copy. Not in the U.S.? I'll be sharing buying links for as many retailers as I can find. If I could afford to send books outside the U.S., I would, and if this book knocks it out of the park in terms of sales and brings in enough income, perhaps in the future I will be able to. If you're a blogger or journalist who wants to write about the book, send me your name, mailing address, blog or publication title and URL to rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com with "BWE" in the subject line and I'll have Cleis Press send you a copy.

A question I'm sure the writers out there want to know: am I editing any new titles? Right now, I don't have any calls for submission, but I hope to in the near future, and as soon as I do, I will be posting those. Should I be granted the honor of getting to edit another volume in this series, one thing I'm going to do is only open it to authors who weren't in this first volume, to make room for more voices. That's part of my mission as an editor, to widen the audience for writers who are starting out, just as the genre was opened to me when I wrote my first story, "Monica and Me."

Here's the thing, though: in order to make editing any new books worthwhile for me, I have to make sure the ones I do have coming out are successes. I used to not consider my output and pump out 6-8 anthologies per year, and the books suffered for that glut. Now, I'm working smarter and making sure my books are as excellent as I can make them and that I put the effort into making sure they reach a wide audience. That's more important to me right now than simply chasing the next anthology contract. So while I hope I will be editing more books, I'm focused on my current books because I want them to be read. One huge way to help my books succeed is to review them (anywhere is a help, and any kind of review goes a long way); this is my thank you and offering to 50 of you. You can also add it to your Goodreads want-to-read list, which is also very helpful in boosting the book's profile.

Here's the lineup for Best Women's Erotica of the Year, Volume 1. Few things make me happier as an editor than publishing authors I've never published before, and there are many of them in this volume!

Working on a book can be a long and lonely process. Even an anthology. Yes, it's social in the sense that I get to work with lots of other authors, but I'm doing that work via email, at home, alone. Even though I've been through the process over 50 times, my anthologies still feel like words on a screen or a page until I hold the book in my hands. So now that my latest, Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples is officially in stock on Amazon (in paperback; the ebook release date is November 16th), it's both a relief and the start of the exciting part: sharing my book.

This one is special, because while it's for sale early, its official publication date is on my 40th birthday, November 10th. I'll be spending the day sharing lots of other people's posts about the book and simply celebrating a new stage of my life and this latest book, one I'm very proud of.

You can read an excerpt from the opening story, "The Corset" by Dorothy Freed, at Kinkly. Hope you like it!

Thursday, October 29, 2015

I'm typing this at my desk as I listen to the rain outside, and I'm so grateful to be in my warm, cozy home. My home has shifted a lot in the last few years, after moving in 2013, 2014 and 2015, and I'm sure I'll be finding a new home soon enough. But why I've truly embraced domesticity, and why, I believe, it's embraced me back and helped my personal and professional lives succeed where before they hadn't, is that I've been willing to give back to my home.

When I was in the worst of my hoarding days, I refused to take even the tiniest steps to take care of my home. Cut to today where every day I vacuum my kitchen and wash and put away dishes and clean the stove. Where I rush to take out the recycling the moment a piece of paper or aluminum can is ready to go. Yesterday, I vacuumed the carpet in my room and then was inspired to do some of the common areas too.

I'm not suddenly some super neat person, but I've come to not just appreciate but deeply need all the ways we've set up this home. It's not just mine, it's ours, and that joint pride makes me want even more to make it my own. I have a print of my favorite Georgia O'Keeffe painting on my wall. The truth is, since it's to my right, not facing me, I don't actually pause and savor its beauty and message as often as I should. Sort of like the "open" tattoo on my back that I sometimes take for granted. I love having a gigantic bedroom/office with all my books displayed, easily within reach. I love having my own bathroom and a walk in closet that still feels like such a luxury sometimes I simply sit on the floor in it and read, because I've never had a closet where I was able to do that. I have even come to embrace suburbia.

No, it doesn't have the rush of New York, where on Monday night, Natalie Merchant, Ringo Starr and Pharrell were all speaking (and I'm sure there were plenty of other celebrities doing interesting things as well). But what my life in suburbia may lack in glamour and culture, it more than makes up for in peacefulness. I'd venture to say that when I lived in New York, I didn't want that peacefulness, or at least, not enough to make it a priority. I wanted the thrill of rushing from here to there, of nonstop events, of feeling so "busy" all the time. Now, I actually am working on looking at my 2016 events and business plans so that I can both do the work I want to do, make enough to not worry about my bills, and also have enough time for me and the other important things in life. I moved to New Jersey because I was ready for a different way of life, and every time I leave and return, I'm all the more aware of how ready that life was for me as well.

I could tell you right now about the things I've published recently, about nutscaping and erectile dysfunction and crowdfunded vibrators, and if you are interested in those topics, I do encourage you to read those. But I'm more focused on what's next; I usually am. I'm getting ready for a big month: November brings the start of a new LitReactor class that I'm gearing up for with new interviews and information for my students, my new book Dirty Dates, events in Savannah and Washington, DC, and turning 40, which is sneaking up on me so fast, I feel like I barely have time to say goodbye to my chaotic, often ridiculous, tumultuous and all-over-the-map thirties.

I fly to Savannah on Wednesday, and I return home on Tuesday, my birthday. In the meantime, I'm focusing on appreciating what's right in front of me, and knowing that I can have that sense of quiet and calm and beauty wherever I live, if I put the effort into it.

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Just about a year ago, I had a setback in my career that made me wonder if I was doing the right thing with my life. I was preparing to head out to Los Angeles, to write about Hello Kitty Con and teach an erotica writing class. About a week before the scheduled class, despite having been sent a contract, the organization that had booked me abruptly cancelled my workshop. They were the ones who approached me, and I had been counting on their fee to help cover some of my expenses.

I was shocked at this turn of events, appalled by the unprofessionalism of a group I had thought I could trust, but worst of all, it made me question my own instincts in terms of who I'd chosen to do business with and wonder if, since they'd cancelled because of low enrollment, I had a future in teaching erotica. Teaching had been one part of my creative business, alongside freelance writing, anthology editing and consulting, that I'd developed as part of my income stream, one that I'd been honing and improving at the more I did it. Last year, I also added an online teaching component via LitReactor.com, which opened up my teaching skills and breadth of my offerings. I had been feeling good about myself, and this utterly threw me for a loop.

After that LA fiasco, I had a choice to make: go big or go home. Well, I did literally go home to New Jersey, but figuratively, I decided to "go big," but in my own way. I realized I had to do better due diligence when it came to partnering with other businesses or groups, rather than simply relying on whether a group looked impressive based on what they said about themselves. I had to start getting contracts in place that I was willing to go to bat to enforce, and to take myself seriously as both a teacher and a businesswoman.

I also came to the realization that one failed event does not make me a failure, and doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing. It means I'm growing and learning. It means I, like any small business, has ups and downs, and the downs are opportunities to assess where I've gone wrong and correct course, to figure out what to do differently next time.

2015 has been, far and away, what I'd consider the best year of my career. Yes, in 2014 I left a soulless job I despised to become a full-time magazine editor and became a columnist for a newspaper I'd read since my teen years, The Village Voice, thus leading me toward the career I have today, but I'd say 2015 tops that. I've written for The New York Times, The Washington Post, O, The Oprah Magazine and Marie Claire, and many other new to me publications, taught online and in person workshops and, as I prepare to enter my forties, am trying to figure out how I can top this year by going deeper into my passions next year.

The past few weeks have brought numerous signs from the universe that, unlike what I'd thought in my most pessimistic moments a year ago, I'm indeed supposed to be doing exactly what I'm doing. My job is not to second guess that I've found my groove, but to hone and refine it. One is a mere vague, wispy possibility, that if it comes to fruition, would be amazing, and if that happens, I will shout it from the rooftops.

As for the other: on Wednesday night, after an incredibly long day in Portland, Maine, where I'd written three articles and was utterly exhausted, I opened iTunes and found a new episode of my new podcast obsession, Raise Your Hand. Say Yes. by Tiffany Han, was ready for my ears. I was excited that a friend, Kate McCombs, was on to talk about pleasure. I Tweeted about how cool that was. Then, as I lay there listening, I heard her single out my erotica books for praise. I can't stress enough how thrilled that made me. It truly felt like some kind of divine sign, especially because I had a phone interview scheduled with Han the next day for an article I'm writing.

I'll be sharing more about my upcoming LitReactor class, and am planning a new slate of writing class offerings for 2016. Most of all, during the last few months of this year, I'll be assessing what's gone right and what's gone wrong, and working hard to embrace these signs and live up to their promise.

For more information about my next monthlong LitReactor class, which runs November 3-December 3, click here. And whatever your passion is, I hope you're out there making it happen, and looking for signs to help you along your path. Don't listen to the naysayers or believe that one blip is a reason to veer off course. Your job is to make your own course.

Rachel Kramer Bussel writes widely about sex, dating, books and pop culture. She's the author of Sex & Cupcakes: A Juicy Collection of Essays and edited of over 50 anthologies, including Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples, Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica, The Big Book of Orgasms, among others. She Tweets @raquelita.

Thursday, October 22, 2015

As you probably know, I'll take almost any opportunity to use my personal life as fodder for my writing. Which may sound bad, but is both honest and, I hope, I learn things as I write that can improve my relationship. That's certainly the case with my latest Washington Post Solo-ish article on "How to fight with your significant other." Thanks to Sherry Amateinstein, Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson for sharing their expertise. (In case you missed it, my first piece for them was on why I don't want to get married.)

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

I interviewed Bea and Leah Koch, book-loving sisters who are crowdfunding via Kickstarter to open The Ripped Bodice, a romance only bookstore, in Los Angeles. Check it out to read about why they want to overcome stereotypes about romance readers, how the bookstore will function as a community space, and why they won't be carrying Fifty Shades of Grey.

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

I've been visiting friends in Portland, Maine the past few days. It's one of my favorite cities, and each time, I discover new things. Last night I had a delicious dinner at Mi Sen Noodle Bar, where I was delighted to see chive cakes on the menu. I had a version of chive cakes from a street vendor in Bangkok this summer, and they were so good I've missed them. Plus I got a bowl of delicious and spicy noodles and admired the noodle art on the wall. I might even go back! I also enjoyed a delicious and somewhat crazy meal at Empire, where I highly recommend the garlic green beens and, if this sounds up your alley, the egg roll with pastrami (yes, really).

Here's a few photos from my trip, and at the end, details about my erotica writing workshop on Wednesday, October 21st. If you can't make it but might know someone in the area, please let them know. Also, as a book lover, I have to say: yes, Portland has wonderful independent bookstores, but the two biggest ones barely stock erotica. They may not even have anything. And that's okay; they have a great range of books but I think it's a shame they don't have sexy ones. So if you want to buy erotica in Portland, Maine, head on over to Nomia. I promise, I'm not just saying that because they stock mine; Nomia has a wide selection of sex and erotica books, along with videos, sex toys and other products, and I think that's so important, for people to have a place to browse for their erotic inspiration in a relaxed, comfortable, welcoming and knowledgeable environment.

How cute are these cat tights?

Taco Escobarr - haven't eaten here yet, but what a name!

I didn't buy this, but I'm pretty bad at housekeeping, although I'm getting much better.

Yes, there's a Prince tribute band named Purple Brainz 3.

This is either my fifth or sixth visit to Portland since November 2011, when I came here and got my heart tattoo. But until this weekend, I hadn't been to the Portland Museum of Art. As a modern art fan, I really enjoyed the variety of exhibits and styles. I saw art by many artists I'd never heard of, and a few classics like Lichtenstein. Plus there were interactive exhibits, like this shell one.

I'm sure I'll be posting more photos on Instagram today and tomorrow. Hope to see you Wednesday night at Nomia!

October 21, 7:30-9 pmErotica 101 Writing Workshop, Portland, Maine
Rachel Kramer Bussel, professional erotica author and editor of over 50 erotica anthologies, such as Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica, The Big Book of Orgasms, Best Bondage Erotica 2015 and more, will take you through the ins and outs of modern erotic writing. Learn how to get started, find your voice, and write against type. You'll discover how to incorporate everyday scenarios as well as outlandish fantasies into your writing, and make them fit for particular magazines and anthologies. She'll also talk about submitting your work and keeping up with the thriving erotica market (including anthologies, ebooks, magazines and websites). Whether you're writing to that special someone, penning longtime fantasies, or want to earn cash for your dirty words, this workshop is for you. Please bring paper or writing implements or a laptop to use for in class writing exercises. A bibliography with erotica resources will be provided. $20/person. Call 207-773-4774 or visit Nomia to register. Limited to 20 people.Nomia, 24 Exchange Street, Suite 215, Portland, Maine 04101

Monday, October 19, 2015

In my Amazon review of the new sugar baby novella So Sweet by Rebekah Weatherspoon, I called it "a new twist on the billionaire romance," which I think is a valid description. I don't tend to read a lot of billionaire stories because the very word, "billionaire" can feel off-putting to me. But this one's different. Why? Here's what I wrote after I read this novella:

I was intrigued by So Sweet because it looks at love, lust and money in a way that's different from other billionaire books. Kayla isn't an wide-eyed ingenue; she's a cute, chubby single black woman who's on the broke side, and reluctantly agrees to try sugar baby/sugar daddy site Arrangements. She's still skeptical when she goes to her first party, but quickly becomes intrigued by a hot billionaire, Michael, who doesn't quite fit the stereotype she has of sugar daddies. He's sexy, although pushing 50, and he's refreshingly candid about his money and his motives. Watching their romance unfold, as well as drama with her roommate and family as they adjust to this new twist in Kayla's life, is fun. Kayla is a realistic character, and Weatherspoon has her be a voice of reason, rather than simply getting swept away by the mere prospect of a cute guy with money. She knows the value of money, but falls for Michael for who he is inside, not what he can provide for her. This is a sexy twist on the modern billionaire romance, and I look forward to the next installment in February.

I'm a fan of Rebekah Weatherspoon, who spoke on my panel last year at CatalystCon on erotica, and who's one of the authors I interview in my LitReactor writing class. This novella captures a world I know very little about, sugar baby dating, and brings it to life. It also treats money realistically, especially from Kayla's perspective. If you've ever dated while broke, I think you'll especially appreciate it. You can get the ebook on Amazon, Kobo, Inktera or Nook.

Official description:

Desperate times call for desperate measures…

And desperate is the only way to describe Kayla Davis’s current situation. Out of work and almost out of money to cover her bills, Kayla finally caves to her roommate’s nagging and follows her to Arrangements, an online dating site that matches pretty young women with older men of a certain tax bracket.

Convinced this “make-rent-quick” scheme will surely fail—or saddle her with an 80 year old boyfriend—Kayla is shocked when Michael Bradbury, Internet billionaire and stone-cold salt and pepper fox, offers her a solution to all her financial troubles. It’s hard enough for Kayla to accept his generosity, but what’s a girl to do when the wealthiest man she’s ever met is a dream in and outside of the bedroom?

I wanted to share some more information about the class, in addition to what's on their site, because it can be confusing and I want anyone who signs up to be ready to devote their time and energy to it in order to get the most for their money. Also, you choose your username upon joining LitReactor and can be anonymous. You can take the class from anywhere in the world on your schedule; I've had students from various countries take my four previous sold out classes.

How it works is that there's a weekly written lecture, which you can read at your leisure. I also post a weekly writing assignment and you have 4-5 days to complete it, then 2-3 days to critique 3 of your fellow students' work and get critiques from them. I critique everyone's work as well. I estimate that the writing and critiques will take about 5 hours per week; if you don't have 5 hours a week to devote to this class, I would advise waiting until a time when you do.

Additionally, I post almost every day with further information that's optional reading, including Q&As with over a dozen erotica writing professionals, including authors Victoria Blisse, Rose Caraway, Emerald, Feminista Jones, Selena Kitt, Sommer Marsden, Tiffany Reisz, Elizabeth SaFleur, Charlotte Stein, Cecilia Tan, Rebekah Weatherspoon and others. I also provide exclusive details from publishers and editors on what they're looking for. All of the classroom materials, including all postings, will be available to you forever.

Anyone can start a discussion or ask a question publicly on the message boards, or privately to me, about anything related to erotica writing or publishing. Additionally, after class ends on December 3rd, if you are interested, I will invite you to join a private online group for my erotica writing class alumni to continue the discussions and questions and chat in a similar way with other erotica writers. I put a major emphasis on submitting your work if you are interested in doing so, and provide resources and support to get you knowledgeable about the erotica marketplace and ready to send out completed writing.

Friday, October 16, 2015

I'm heading to Maine today, to visit an old friend, and will be there for most of next week to teach erotica writing Wednesday in Portland at Nomia. Therefore, I'm going to quickly link to and mention my latest writings. First and most exciting: I have two short pieces in the new November issue of Marie Claire, with Lea Michele on the cover. It's part of a porn package with articles by Amanda de Cadenet and Cindy Gallop (founder of Make Love Not Porn), and there's a piece I tore out by Carrie Brownstein about fun things to do in Portland. See pages 236 and 237 for my interview with feminist porn director Erika Lust and my porn picks. After you read my interview, if you're in Chicago, you can hear Erika Lust speak at the Chicago International Film Festival. I don't know if my pieces will run on their website, but if they do, I'll share them.

Lastly, I got personal at Lady Smut, musing about my "vanilla" sex life and my very much not vanilla, kinky book of BDSM erotica, Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples, which pubs on my 40th birthday, November 10th. Yes, I love dropping that tidbit because over 50 books in, I've never had one come out on my birthday!

Wednesday, October 14, 2015

The other day, I got a very short but incredibly powerful (to me) email. It was 35 words, to be exact, because I am dorky enough to do a word count. In a nutshell, it said thank you. For a Tweet I wrote. But why it was powerful was that someone took the time out of their busy day, someone I respect and admire, to say that.

I got another one a few days later, for something else I'd done online. I really don't have the words to express how moving that was for me. Online life, or at least, mine, can move at what feels like lightning speed. I sometimes have to make lists of people to email, things to post and Tweet and Instagram and schedule on Google Calendar. It's exciting and exhausting and sometimes makes me want to give up on all of electronic communication.

But I don't, because I believe in the social power of "social media." I believe in connecting with people, even when you don't hear from them directly, even when we are all being pulled in umpteen different directions.

The message I got from those emails was: You matter. And that's a message I want to parlay back to you. I have lots of other posts I want to write, about honing your creativity in erotica and things I've written and publisher newsletters and traveling, but right now, from a Manhattan Starbucks, that's what I want to say. Life is not, ultimately, about amassing "followers," which sounds like some sort of cult creepiness, but about reaching real live people, or even just one person.

Those emails made me want to pay that sentiment forward, to tell more people how much their caring, their actions, their words, their art, means to me. Which is what I plan to do. Starting with this.

I came up with the idea of doing something special since the publication date, November 10th, is also my 40th birthday. Instead of a blog tour, with bloggers posting for a few weeks about the book's release, I'm asking bloggers to post on November 10th about Dirty Dates. What can you write about? Anything, as long as you post the special book birthday image and two links about the book. You can review Dirty Dates, interview Rachel or one of the other 20 contributing authors, riff on BDSM or kinky couples. What you post is up to you, as long as it happens on November 10th! You get a free copy of the book and I will share your post on Dirty Dates social media accounts (all @dirtydatesbook) on Twitter, Facebook and Tumblr. Want to join the celebration? Register here by October 20th (all fields are required). Questions? Email dirtydatesbook at gmail.com and I'll get right back to you!

Thursday, October 08, 2015

My new BDSM erotica anthology, Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples, will officially be published on my 40th birthday, November 10, 2015. Buying links below; alas, the ebook doesn't publish until November 16th. But today my doorbell rang and there was an early birthday present, the first I've received: the copies I ordered of my new book, which has bigger cleavage than I do! My arms are short, so my selfie is not to scale, but I like it anyway and am so excited that this book of extremely hot stories by very talented authors, many of whom I'm publishing for the first time, will be in readers' hands very soon. Some of the retailers below still have an old version of the cover, but as you can see from me holding the book in my hand, the sexier cover is the final one! You can also follow the book @dirtydatesbook on Twitter and on Facebook for news and excerpts, and if you want to show your support ahead of the book's publication, why not add Dirty Dates to your Goodreads want to read list? I've also got free postcards that I'm giving out at my upcoming events and to my newsletter subscribers - sign up for the newsletter at rachelkramerbussel.com and stay tuned for November's!

I'm a huge fan of short stories in all forms, which is good because I wrote and edit lots of them. But the short short stories in my books with 69 tales each are among my favorites. Why? Because the authors pack so much into a very short word count: 1,200 words or less. The book of mine that got me started on this path is Gotta Have It: 69 Stories of Sudden Sex, and right now, it's on sale on Amazon: only $3.30 for the paperback and $3.14 for the Kindle edition!

I don't know how long this sale will last, and prices could change any second, so if you are interested and haven't read this book, I would check it out.

But I'm not asking you to buy it without trying some of the stories free! You can listen to many of them narrated by Rose Caraway, who narrated the audiobook version. You can listen on this blog to 5 stories, which are: "Laugh" by Sommer Marsden, "Police Dogging" by Elizabeth Coldwell, "Remembering the Wrinkles" by Penelope Friday, "Not Just a Myth" by Heidi Champa, and "The Dirty Things She Says" by Sinclair Sexsmith. You can also hear Rose read what might be my favorite story in the book: the gender swapping "Remote Control" by Logan Zachary. Like BDSM? Listen and watch me read my face slapping story "Manners" at Coco de Mer in Los Angeles, shot by photographer Dave Naz.

Rachel Kramer Bussel has collected a wide and wild variety of original erotica stories that are deliciously short — just one orgasmic bite at a time. In 1,200 words or less, these authors explore every which way you can “get it on,” including threesomes, sex toys, public sex, BDSM, fetishes, and much more. Get “Anal-yzed,” learn “The Advantage of Working from Home” and spy some risqué “Vacation Pictures.” There are pecan rolls dripping in caramel and meals where lovers feast on nothing but each other. From crossword puzzles to Godzilla, these tales are perfect for reading aloud before you live out your own frisky fantasy. For those who like their sex quick and naughty, Gotta Have It has a host of erotic offerings to get you going.

Introduction: Short, Sweet and Totally Sexy

Everyone needs a break from his or her everyday life sometimes, and what better way to escape than with a short story that gets right to the point? The authors of the sixty-nine stories you hold in your hand understand exactly how to pique your interest and get you off , and they do it all in 1,200 words or less. You don’t need long to get drawn into the drama, tension and lust.

I received close to three hundred submissions for this collection, more than I ever have before, and I think that’s because no one, writer or reader alike, can resist a short story that seduces instantaneously. These stories aren’t all about quickie sex, though there’s plenty of that. There are strangers who meet and know right away they must have each other, neighbors, travel mates, coworkers and long-term couples such as those in “After Ten Years” and “Remembering the Wrinkles” who are looking for ways to hold on to that spark. There are stories of sex in libraries, vacation sex and lots of outdoor sex—in the rain, in the street, all over. There are lovers with pecan rolls dripping in caramel, and meals where lovers feast on nothing but each other. There are even a few stories with no actual sex in them at all—you’ll have to hunt those down and see why anticipation can be the sexiest act of all.

There’s humor, kink, flirtation, Godzilla, missed connections, sex toys, and one very bold census taker. But I don’t want to take up too much of your time that could be better spent getting intimately acquainted with these short but incredibly sexy stories. I hope you will savor them, read them aloud and return to your favorites again and again. Because all of us have a few minutes set aside for a quickie, don’t we?

Wednesday, October 07, 2015

My essay "I love my boyfriend, but I never want to get married" is up today at The Washington Post's Solo-ish section. The title pretty much tells you what it's about. Whether you agree with me or not, I hope you'll check it out. Yes, I'm pushing myself to pitch new markets and kick my own ass in light of the end of my weekly column, and so far, it's working.

Tuesday, October 06, 2015

I'm gearing up to hit the road and do these final 3 live workshops and one online one of 2015. I'll also be doing a free reading November 6th in Savannah, Georgia at Back in the Day Bakery, from 6 to 8 pm. Thanks to my friend Nichelle Stephens for organizing it. I plan to focus mainly on online writing workshops in 2016, since they can reach more people and international audiences, as my LitReactor classes have, though I'm open to select teaching and readings as opportunities arise. Here's what's coming up soon. If you care to spread the word, I'd greatly appreciate it! Questions about my events? Contact the stores listed below or you can always email me at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com.

October 15, 7 pm - 8:30 pmErotica Writing 101 workshop, New York City
Rachel Kramer Bussel, professional erotica author and editor of over 50 erotica anthologies, such as Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica, The Big Book of Orgasms, Best Bondage Erotica 2015 and more, will take you through the ins and outs of modern erotic writing. Learn how to get started, find your voice, and write against type. You'll discover how to incorporate everyday scenarios as well as outlandish fantasies into your writing, and make them fit for particular magazines and anthologies. She'll also talk about submitting your work and keeping up with the thriving erotica market (including anthologies, ebooks, magazines and websites). Whether you're writing to that special someone, penning longtime fantasies, or want to earn cash for your dirty words, this workshop is for you. Please bring paper or writing implements or a laptop to use for in class writing exercises. A bibliography with erotica resources will be provided. $20/person. Limited to 20 people. Register at Eve's Garden or by calling 212-757-8651. Doors at 6:45, class runs from 7-8:30 p.m. and includes a handout with resources.
Eve's Garden, 119 West 57th Street, Suite 1201, NYCwww.evesgarden.com

October 21, 7:30-9 pmErotica 101 Writing Workshop, Portland, Maine
Rachel Kramer Bussel, professional erotica author and editor of over 50 erotica anthologies, such as Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica, The Big Book of Orgasms, Best Bondage Erotica 2015 and more, will take you through the ins and outs of modern erotic writing. Learn how to get started, find your voice, and write against type. You'll discover how to incorporate everyday scenarios as well as outlandish fantasies into your writing, and make them fit for particular magazines and anthologies. She'll also talk about submitting your work and keeping up with the thriving erotica market (including anthologies, ebooks, magazines and websites). Whether you're writing to that special someone, penning longtime fantasies, or want to earn cash for your dirty words, this workshop is for you. Please bring paper or writing implements or a laptop to use for in class writing exercises. A bibliography with erotica resources will be provided. $20/person. Call 207-773-4774 or visit Nomia to register. Limited to 20 people.Nomia, 24 Exchange Street, Suite 215, Portland, Maine 04101

November 8, 7-9 pmErotica Writing 101 workshop, Washington, DC
Rachel Kramer Bussel, professional erotica author and editor of over 50 erotica anthologies, such as Come Again: Sex Toy Erotica, The Big Book of Orgasms, Best Bondage Erotica 2015 and more, will take you through the ins and outs of modern erotic writing. With the popularity of Fifty Shades of Grey, now is a great time to put your own sexy stories onto paper. Learn how to get started, find your voice, and write against type. You'll discover how to incorporate everyday scenarios as well as outlandish fantasies into your writing, and make them fit for particular magazines and anthologies. She'll also talk about submitting your work and keeping up with the thriving erotica market (including anthologies, ebooks, magazines and websites). Whether you're writing to that special someone, penning longtime fantasies, or want to earn cash for your dirty words, this workshop is for you. Please bring paper or writing implements or a laptop to use for in class writing exercises. A bibliography with erotica resources will be provided.
$25 if you register online by November 7 at Eventbrite. Lotus Blooms, 2408 18th Street NW, Washington, DC 20009, 202-836-4474, info at lotusblooms.com

November 3 - December 3Between the Sheets online erotica writing class at LitReactor.com
Online only class limited to 16 people; attend any time, using any username you desire (you can be anonymous) and get critiqued by me and fellow students and receive guidance about publishing your work. You participate at your convenience on your own schedule. You'll learn how to draw on your surroundings, incorporate humor and heartache, approach stories from multiple POVs and heighten the erotic tension in your work. You'll also get access to exactly what editors and publishers are currently looking for based on my research, as well as additional information on publishing short story collections, editing anthologies and self-publishing. Includes exclusive Q&As with over a dozen erotica writing professionals, including publishers, editors and authors such as Tiffany Reisz, Elizabeth SaFleur, Charlotte Stein, Cecilia Tan, Rebekah Weatherspoon and more. Students also get access once class is over to my private online group for alumni, which provides continued access to fellow writers, discussion and resources. Click through for more details about class assignments and goals. Students have access to the classroom materials indefinitely once class is over. I recommend having at least 5 hours a week to devote to this class to get the most out of it. $375/person. The last four classes sold out so I recommend not waiting until the last minute to register. Questions about the class? Email rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com with "LitReactor" in the subject line.

Monday, October 05, 2015

My new anthology Dirty Dates: Erotic Fantasies for Couples has an official publication date of November 10th, aka my birthday, but I just found out it will be shipping from the printer to stores (and me!) this week, so if you pre-order it, you're likely to get it a little earlier than 11/10.

One of my favorite experiences reading erotica is grokking the heat of something that doesn’t turn me on at all. "Magic Words" by Emily Bingham lets me feel Daddy/girl play from the point of view of someone it works for, deep and real enough that I really think I get it…even if I’m not about to go looking for it myself.

"Baby Steps" by Justine Elyot got me too. I’m not a parent, but I’ve been through enough life changes during my nearly twenty-year relationship that I recognize this moment. The stakes are high, and I love how this shows the very real way we bring ourselves into the sex we have. This one is a favorite more for the story than the kink and/or sex, though.

"On Location" by D. L. King is fun and flirty, with an absolutely fabulous glimpse into the lives of lovers who don’t share a home. I very much enjoy erotica depicting warm, non-traditional relationships. And the set-up is hot!

"Recipe for Punishment" by Jacqueline Brocker is a-fucking-dorable. The punishment is brutal and glorious, a quick and effective mid-scene check-in is heartwarming, the achievement is his to own, and the love fills them both.

As I posted last week, Philadelphia City Paper will be shutting down with this week's issue. Last week's column was my final one. I won't bother posting tons of links to my favorite column since the online archives will very rapidly be disappearing. I also won't waste your time or mine lamenting this news, because I live by the Serenity Prayer. Since there's nothing I can do about the end of my column, I'm focused on other freelance writing and projects to make up for that lost income.

Here's the thing: I'm not a naturally glass half full kind of person, but I've had to be. Freelancing is the ultimate in at will employment, and I've had numerous gigs end, from my Village Voice Lusty Lady column to my stint editing Sex Diaries for New York magazine site Daily Intel. Just last month, I unexpectedly found myself with two short stories I'd expected to be published in an anthology, but weren't. I promptly published one on Lady Smut and submitted the other to Tamsin Flowers' Superotica Advent Calendar. For me, being pro-active simply feels much better than wallowing in bad news. It makes me believe the future is going to be infinitely better than the past, because I'm in charge of making it so.

So with that in mind, I want to share the three biggest lessons/takeaways I learned from writing 51 weekly columns for Philadelphia City Paper (there were a few weeks my column didn't run due to space issues).

1. Look far and wide for subjects

Yes, my column was published by a Philadelphia alt weekly, but I did my best to make it relevant to global readers. I learned when writing for the Voice that with the online edition, the column could be read by anyone, anywhere. I also didn't and don't live in Philadelphia, so I wasn't going to be able to cover too many local events, though I did take the time and spend the money to travel to Philly several times for local profiles. However, what's most fascinating to me is that almost everything I covered potentially could have wider interest. I wrote about a UK sex blogger's dick pics, which proved especially popular. Had nothing to do with Philadelphia per se, but it was about something many people were interested in, so it did well online.

I'd never written a weekly column before, and the pace often felt relentless. I wound up planning several weeks ahead just to get a grasp on things, which made it tough at the end to have already done research for upcoming columns and suddenly have no home for them. But that constant search for the new and novel forced me to broaden my horizons and seek out experts who I hadn't encountered before. I paid attention the world of sexuality in a way I hadn't been before writing the column, and I believe I'm more knowledgeable for that effort.

2. I want to have an impact on the world with my words

Going along with the potential global impact, I learned that I could break a story, and that I loved doing it. In January, my profile of my friend Crista Anne and her OrgasmQuest got picked up by numerous media outlets, including Jezebel, Refinery29, and many others, and led to Dr. Drew discussing it on his HLN show, including an appearance by Crista, prompted by the social media response to his posting about the topic. Seeing how fast and how far this topic spread, including to international press, made me realize I have good instincts. I obviously didn't know in advance the response the story would get, but this buoyed me when pitching other venues.

On both personal and professional levels, this feels good. It's not so much about outside validation, as knowing that my words resonate with others, and because of them, something I thought was powerful is becoming even more powerful.

3. I have to be the very best advocate for myself I can be

Finally, what may be the biggest lesson: I learned that I have to advocate for myself every step of the way. For instance, some of the early stories about OrgasmQuest didn't credit and/or link to my Philadelphia City Paper column. So I hopped right on email and asked for a link, and I believe every source I asked for did it. This weekend, I realized that I hadn't fully filled in my Mic profile. But my first thought was, "Why does that author get a photo and byline and Twitter link and I don't?" Then, Oh. I have to provide that information myself.. So I did, and it immediately appeared below my article. That happened when I published my hoarding essay with The Washington Post. The initial version didn't mention my Twitter handle; I'd read plenty of other contributors' pieces, so knew that was standard. I asked, and it immediately went up. It was a simple mistake, but one I doubt anyone else would notice.

That's why it's so important to know what you're entitled to, and stick up for yourself. I check anything that has my name on it, from articles to book cover copy (front and back), because my name is my reputation, which is what I use to help get me speaking and teaching gigs and new writing assignments. My sense is that a lot of people simply get grouchy or upset or vent when they seem something that seems unfair when it comes to their work, but I fully believe that what will get your farther than negativity is simply being tenacious about asking for what you deserve.

So am I upset that my column is over? Not really, because now my time is freed up to pursue bigger, more lucrative projects. I loved the column, but it's time has come and gone. I'm still writing my DAME sex column every other Wednesday, which I love doing, and will keep writing about sex, but also about books, babies, body image and whatever else catches my eye.

Sunday, October 04, 2015

Aaron Hartzler's new young adult novel What We Saw, published by HarperTeen, was directly inspired by the Steubenville rape case, and features a similar story line about teens, adults and media in a sports-minded small town questioning whether a sexual assault occurred at a party where teens were drinking and documenting their partying on social media. Check out my interview with Hartzler at Salon, and read the book - it's excellent!

Thursday, October 01, 2015

Updated October 2Last September, I woke up on the Sunday morning of CatalystCon West to an email asking if I'd like to start writing a sex column for Philadelphia alternative weekly newspaper Philadelphia City Paper. It had been eight years since my Lusty Lady column in The Village Voice ended, and I was game. I've since written 51 columns, the latest on "Sexual Politics" and featuring a photo of Donald Trump, is my final column, and next week's, my 52nd, will be my last, because the paper is being shut down. As they wrote yesterday, in what had to be an almost impossibly tough news story to cover:

You may have read this afternoon that Philadelphia City Paper had been sold and would cease publication as of next Thursday, October 8.

This came as a surprise to us, too.

I want to thank Lilian Swanson for plucking me out of everyone else she could have chosen. Writing a weekly sex column was an incredible learning experience. You have to always be on top of your subjects and what's happening in the world in a way I had never been before. I got to see what it was like to have a column, and its subject, OrgasmQuest, go viral. I got to approach Valentine's Day from a polyamorous perspective on metamours. And so much more. Writing that column made me feel part of the writing world in a way I remembered from my Voice days, let me profilefascinatingpeople and kept me on my toes. It let me feel part of a city where I don't live, but now live in its vicinity.

If you're an editor, I'd love to talk to you about contributing to your newspaper, magazine, website, etc., and can be reached at rachelkramerbussel at gmail.com. I actually am looking for topics beyond sex, though of course I will always write about sex and dating, but I like to expand my beats of books, pop culture, body image, hoarding and whatever else strikes my fancy. I have several projects and essays I've been wanting to work on but haven't had the time, so I will be looking into those, and preparing to teach my next LitReactor online erotica writing class, which starts November 3rd, and prepping for the release of my 40th birthday and the anthology that publishes that day, Dirty Dates. So I have a lot on my plate, but will miss the challenge of this weekly column, and wish all the staff of Philadelphia City Paper the best.

I wrote my first article for Mic, a site I read every day and highly recommend, about Stacy Bias's Rad Fatty Merit Badges. She's funding the stickers and buttons through Indiegogo, and her immediate inspiration was Nicole Arbour's awful "Dear Fat People" video. Check it out. I was inspired to read about this because while she's done many larger projects, this one grew out of an in-the-moment inspiration and the reaction to it. As someone whose middle name could be "overthinking," I decided as I was working on this piece that I want to be more pro-active in general in my life, because you never know what will grow out of your smallest actions.