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Day Two.

Today was a pretty tough day. I set my alarm 20 minutes early to get my meditation time in, but once it came time to sit, I got interrupted a couple of times and I also had two Couchsurfers staying in the living room right outside my bedroom. They were sleeping, but I still had a slight feeling of vulnerability, as if someone would walk in and catch me sitting on my arse on my bed staring at nothing (staring at the back of my eyelids.)

It probably didn’t help that I didn’t get much sleep the night before, so when certain stressors came up at work, instead of calmly embracing them I went back to old thinking patterns, back to thoughts based in fear. Often I would catch myself with these anxious thoughts and come back to the breath. The breath always is a constant reminder to take in the moment and to remember everything is negotiable.

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12 comments on “Day Two.”

I, too, feel uncomfortable in situations where I feel as if people might be “watching.” Someone with many years of meditation experience once advised that, in time, I’ll grow more comfortable with the idea.

Hi Ilonca!
Very bizarre. Long time! I fell off the rails and have been happily retired from the Army for the past few months. The strangest thing tho…I received three simultaneous email alerts to new blog posts from you…the Day One, Day Two, and Dreams. These were all posted in 2012! What made it even crazier was when I was reading the Dreams blog (first) it got to a point in your story of a ringing/buzzing and simultaneously my watch started buzzing me, “Time to Get Moving” alert. Anyway I thought it was all a little strange after I realized the dates from the three “new” postings. Maybe the Universe wanted me to drop you a line on this New Moon, who knows! Take care!
Ben

Stranger still (not so much), I was literally thinking of coming back and writing but then I thought of you. “You tried coming back you hack!” I did try. Barely. I am grateful for your false WordPress late/deleted blogs? The timing is Perfect. There are no mistakes in life and I can never mistake the Voice in my mind. It guided me back to you to wake m up. Write. And not Shakespeare obviously but.
Thank you

Thanks for the comment Katelon, yeah these are old posts that I had changed to “private” years ago, but recently decided to post them for public view again. It was in 2012 when I first started my meditation practice, I decided to start a blog to document all the changes that went on with(in) me…and what a journey it’s been and continues to be! I have heard of Silva, but am not super familiar with it. Blessings!

No, I only stayed there 5 months and then moved back to Portland, but now I’m leaving Portland again to go work in Hawaii for the winter…and for the spring, I have no idea yet where I’ll be, all I can say is that I hope it’s not Portland because I feel so out of alignment energetically with Portland!!!!

Ah…I liked visiting my Navajo “daughter” and her family in St. George and live Zion and the So. Utah geography but didn’t relate to the town. I’m in Spokane right now and don’t relate to this town either. Hope you enjoy Hawaii.