Matt Hasselbeck had kind of a rough day against the Vikings and probably deserved to get yanked, but I think we can all agree that Vikings beat writer Tom Pelissero was probably referring to the "sad trombone" or maybe the old vaudeville gimmick of pulling a guy off the stage with a cane when he sent this wonderful tweet out into the world.

Whatever the case may be, the Rusty Trombone is neither of those things. In fact, the Rusty Trombone is quite another thing altogether. Just so we're all on the same page, I will now quote Wikipedia—sure, there's a Wikipedia entry on the Rusty Trombone—and tell you that the Rusty Trombone

Advertisement

Advertisement

is a sexual act in which a man stands with his knees and back slightly bent, with feet at least shoulder width apart to expose his anus. The other partner typically kneels behind the man and performs anilingus while reaching up beneath the testicles or around the body to manually administer rapid up and down motions of the penis, mimicking the motions of a trombone player.

So, yeah. Probably not the Rusty Trombone.

Update 9:50 p.m.: It has been noted that Rusty Smith is the third string quarterback for the Tennessee Titans. If this was a self-aware tweet and I've given Tom Pelissero short-shrift for a clever play on words, then a hearty +1 to you Tom. Either way, I'm just happy to have written a post incorporating the accepted definition of the Rusty Trombone.