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Have Your Moment

All in the same week, there have been deaths that have affected people close to me. My mom lost two of her best friends in the same week one was out of the blue and the other we knew it was just a matter of time. Then one of my best friends lost her mother suddenly. Last week I had a few students in my Success Life Skills class who were having really bad days and they just couldn’t seem to get themselves together. They were in class but they weren’t. The class discussion was about working, grinding and hustling. Doing what you need to do to make things happen in your life and being consistent at it. Well it got to a point where a few of my students kept bringing up things that were getting in the way or traumatic incidents that they never really dealt with and ended up having a break down and breakthrough in class, which happens often. When my students get aha moments in my class or come to the realization that some things need to change in their lives, tears of release start streaming down their faces.

As I was preparing for this week’s post, a statement that I had been saying all week was ‘have your moment.’ Sometimes in the midst of everything we have going on, life gets so crazy and overwhelming that we sometimes miss the opportunity to have a moment. You might be asking, “What exactly does that mean?”

Well it means cry if you need to cry, laugh if you need to laugh, scream if you need to scream, but HAVE YOUR MOMENT. Additionally, I teach my students and coaching clients the importance of not staying in the moment. It’s okay to be angry, sad, confused, overwhelmed, etc, but you can’t stay there. You can have bad moments but not bad days or weeks or months. Don’t let a moment steal the joy and love, and peace and happiness life is waiting to give you.

My girlfriend, I imagine, is going to have many moments once the overwhelm of preparing for her mom’s funeral subsides. I imagine that my mom will think of her friends at different times and have many moments remembering all of the good times they had together. I am sure you have had things happen in your life that when you think about them, make you smile while tears well up in your eyes. It’s okay. Have your moment. Feel the emotion you are having. Don’t ignore it, don’t just push through it as it if it didn’t happen. Don’t repress it and act like it didn’t happen. Sometimes it’s easier to move on when you take time to actually acknowledge what you are feeling. As I watched my one student try to hold back the tears, once I gave her permission to have her moment, she let out what I believe she had been holding in for who knows how long. She just let out this HUGE sigh with her cry.

So let me ask you…

What are you holding in?

What are you holding back?

Who told you that it wasn’t okay to have and live in your moment?

Well, I now give you permission to have your moment. Now remember, the key is to feel the emotion, let the emotion do what it’s supposed to do and then keep moving. Take as much time as you need, just don’t let it stop you from living. Have your moment, just don’t let your moment consume you. The bible is clear that “those that live Godly in Christ shall suffer persecution.” The bible also says “many are the afflictions of the righteous but the Lord will deliver them from them all.” If you have difficulty making it through hard and difficult times, cast your cares on God because He cares for you. Know that this too shall pass. As hard as it may seem and as bad as it may feel. If He brought you to it, He WILL bring you through it.

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Detra M. Trueheart is a Speaker and Life Coach. Her company, TrueheartSpeaks Enterprises, is dedicated to helping women of faith break barriers in beliefs and behaviors to create a life lived IN and ON Purpose. Learn how Detra can help you create a life with more faith, focus, freedom, & fulfillment: http://www.trueheartspeaks.com

4 thoughts on “Have Your Moment”

I needed that and thank you! I agree that it’s ok to “Have a moment” My mother just passed July 30th and I just started having my moments. I felt worst when I couldn’t feel or cry and was numb. I feel so much better now. I know that I will have moments for the rest of my life and that is ok. I haven’t had as many moments as I feel I should right now but I won’t be too hard on myself. Thanks for the confirmation.

Hi Micah, I’m so glad that this post ministered to you and gave you the confirmation you needed regarding your mom’s passing. Yes you will have many moments. Make sure you be true to yourself and have your moments, but stay there longer than you’re supposed to. It will take some time to get back into the swing of things and to be honest, with your mom gone it will never be the same. However you can move ahead knowing that your mom is always be with you.

This weekend I had a moment where I had to have my own moment. Things just seemed to be overwhelming for me and while at church yesterday I just burst into tears while hugging a friend. I had been holding them back the entire morning and when she hugged me and asked if I was ok, I said no and let out a cry of relief. Even coaches, consultants, leaders, parents, experts get overwhelmed and sometimes bite off more than they can chew. But remember it’s not what happens to you but how you respond. For the last few days, I have been feeling the need to slow down and really re-connect with the Lord. Life has been on autopilot and speed dial and I think it just caught up with me. I encourage you to read this post I wrote just over a year ago and take some time to have your moment if need be. When you feel the tug and then things start feeling tight, shut down, shut off and recharge. Have your moment.