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Satirical & Poetic Musings Of A Self-Proclaimed Nobel Prize Winner

Dr. Freddy Coldfinger, World’s First Traveling Gynecologist

Discrimination City, Indiana. Dr. Freddy Coldfinger, the world’s first, and probably only, traveling gynecologist, stopped by TACP offices today and paid us seven hundred thousand dollars to advertise on our site. So, without further ado, here’s Dr. Coldfinger. Please read carefully what he has to say. He paid us A LOT of money to say it.

Dr. Freddy Coldfinger, World’s First Traveling Gynecologist

Hello to all the lovely female readers of TACP. My name is Dr. Freddy Coldfinger. I’m here to tell you about a new gynecological service I have to offer, and you need not ever leave your home to receive it. Here’s an example of how it works. Let’s say you’ve been putting off having a pelvic exam for months because you simply can not stand the idea of going to a doctor’s office and having your vagina probed by a cold spatula on a hard, vinyl examining table. Brrrrr!!! It gives me the shivers just thinking about it, and I’m a boy! Hee, Hee!

With my traveling gynecological service, you’ll never have to experience this unpleasant scenario again. Just make one simple call to me, and I’ll hop in my traveling gynecological van and come directly to you. I’ll exam your vagina, cervix, and uterus in the privacy of your own home on whichever bed or couch you feel most comfortable. And, as an added bonus, I’ll warm all of my instruments, just seconds before I use them, with my portable, gynecological blowtorch. All you need do is lie back, relax, and have your vagina warmly examined by me, Dr. Freddy Coldfinger, the world’s first traveling gynecologist.

“Dr. Coldfinger Came Right To My Home When My Vagina Needed Medical Probing,” Says This Satisfied Customer

All Dr. Freddy needs is a smart phone app and his business will require a deliberate corporate strategy and lots of help. We can’t solve world hunger but unemployment could disappear in our generation. 🙂