What's It Going To Take To Get You To Walk Out Of Here With A Donut Today?

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Sunday, December 10, 2006

When Do I Get My Deputy Badge?

H and I were driving to the grocery store (actually, I was driving; H was the passenger) when H yelled, "That kid [in the car next to us] just took a bong hit!" Nice. The car was going really slow and swerving, so H called 911.

H: "These two geniuses in the car behind us have a bong."

The 911 dispatch asked us to stay with the car and to let them know where it was going. So we got behind the kids, and the trip to the grocery store turned into an a drive through three different suburbs.

The kids finally stopped in the Wendy's parking lot. (Of course.) The dispatcher asked us to park in a nearby location and keep an eye on them. I felt like I was on a pothead stakeout. The kids stayed in their car for a while, and then got in a waiting minivan. The dispatcher asked us to follow the minivan, but we got stuck in traffic and lost them.

The dispatcher asked us what the kids were wearing. The answer: tie-dye. Tie-dye and Wendy's? Did we even need to follow them? I could have told the dispatcher all this as soon as I saw the bong.

*****

I asked H if he wanted to do a guest post on my blog about our adventure because he was really into it. H says he will consider doing a guest post about some undisclosed subject in the future, so stay tuned!

To anonymous...If someone called -R- a narc, and used their name, then it would either be a joke or even if the person were serious, they would be up front about it. I can only assume you honestly think she's a narc in a negative way for doing that...That makes me think maybe you ought to grow up. Whatever illegal things you want to do in your own home, fine. When you're doing it in a car, you're endangering others, and that's everyone's business...

OK, my question is what the heck took the police so long that you had to do the chase and the stakeout yourself?? I mean, obviously you *wanted* to do it, because, hello, excitement and blog fodder and all that. But for the police to *expect* you to because they couldn't get their ass their soon enough? Odd.

Per anonymous and 3Cs... Whoo-hoo! Controversy and flaming in your comments, -R-! You've officially "arrived" as a blogger! ;-)

Seriously..why did it take the police so long to get there? **worried**

My DW and I did the same thing for a drunk driver that we saw. We called the police...was told to follow him and then followed him to his house. The police came and we gave a statement...but not sure what happened.

Stefanie - I'm not trying to start a 'thing' here...Just stating my opinion. I wouldn't put anything here without using my name (well, my fictitious blog name, that is). Plus with statcounter and all, she probably knows who wrote it anyway...

Everyone knows that responsible potheads procure their munchies before lighting up. I...I mean, not me, but someone I knew, way back when she was in her 20s, yeah, that's it, learned that lesson when she stood in front of the Wendy's menu (don't worry, she wasn't driving) for over 10 minutes trying to decide between 2 menu items. And then opened her mouth to hear herself ordering something completely different, something she didn't even want, but she was too embarassed to take it back.

Y'all have some lazy police out there. Why wouldn't they ask for the license plate number and follow up themselves? Do they expect private citizens to engage in high (or low, even) speed chases all day while they hang out at the precinct or what?

i can't believe the 911 operator would even ask you to follow them and then stake them out. are you sure the operator wasn't messing with your head? i'm picturing all the 911 operators sitting their office, passing the doobie, eating wendy's and laughing uncontrollably over the two good samaritans on hold.

Jenny, you are right. We were quick to jump to conclusions. Except the slow driving and swerving kind of make me think we were right.

3cars, that is exactly how I feel. I don't care what you do in your house, but don't drive like that.

Stefanie, pretty soon I'll be flying high and living large, I guess. I don't know what that means.

Guinness, each time we entered a new suburb (we were right in a corner where three suburbs meet up), H got transferred to a new dispatcher. So each city only had about 10 minutes to respond to our call. You would think that would be enough though. And you would think the cities would coordinate. Oh well.

Schneids, I can't believe you and The Other Schneids followed a drunk driver home. That is so funny! Did you just park in front of his house and wait for the police? I can't believe they are encouraging us to be citizen policewomen!

Liz, that is so funny. I can totally imagine you at Wendy's struggling to order.

Laura B, I'm glad I'm not the only one who would do this.

Lawyerish, I know! We got the license plates for them, so the police know who the cars were registered to at least, but I don't know if they can or did do anything about it.

Spaw, I will try to think of 6 good things.

JR, ha! And good luck on your finals.

Princess, tie dye AND yoga pants. Maybe you're not smoking out right NOW, but I am sure you will later with that outfit.

This entire story is absolutely hilarious, but the particular detail that did it for me was the fact that they got into a minivan. How very very cool of you, potheads. And a bong in a car?! Not at all conspicuous!

I've told Jenny this story before, but it needs to be repeated because frankly, I need a laugh. I did just have one though, thinking about you chasing some poor potheads around Minnesota, -R-.Okay, so this friend of mine, we'll call her Carmite Beth, used to partake of the herbal remedy. And yes, she was usually very responsible and put the pot pies in the oven before lighting the pipe. But one night she did not, and she had to go to Taco Bell with her roomie and his friend. Not only did she have panic attacks about her Mum finding out that she was riding in a car with stoned people, but she nearly got out of the car and ran away when instead of ordering a fajita wrap at the drive thru, her roomie accidentally ordered a vagina wrap and then laughed endlessly and helplessly into the speaker. It should have been enough to stop her smoking weed forever. It wasn't though.And that concludes the hijacking of this comments section. -R-, please don't follow my minivan again, dude. You're killing my buzz. Love ya, peace out.