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Trauma can be defined as an emotional upset, or a disordered psychic or behavioral state resulting from severe mental or emotional stress or physical injury.

Growing up I experienced a traumatic childhood which led to me having severe nightmares in which certain scenes replayed in my psychological mind as well as issues that led into my adulthood. I had issues with trusting people as well as loving myself.

It wasn’t until I was in my mid twenties that the nightmares stopped. However, as a woman soon to enter my mid thirties those traumatic experiences tend to creep up on me every now and then.

This happened recently when my Mom and I released our new book, Redeeming the Time. We hosted a live event Mother’s Day weekend in an effort to help bridge the gap between mothers and daughters worldwide.

(My Mom & I on the Day of Our Book Release: May 12, 2018)

During the event as we discussed different scenarios from my childhood, I began to struggle in my seat and fight back tears because I literally began to feel the pain from those life changing moments I had experienced. WOW! It’s amazing how traumatic experiences that happened over twenty years ago can still trigger certain emotions.

(Some of the attendees of Redeeming the Time Live Event & Book Release)

Growing up I remember feeling like I was crazy because I was put on medication, talked all the time and always got in trouble to the point I was forced to go talk with a therapist. I used to literally think something was wrong with me.

When I was eighteen years old I tried to terminate my life by taking a bottle of pills. Ironically I awakened to the worst headache ever! In the midst of it all none of what I have been through had the power to terminate my life; not even my own attempt.

Perhaps you are experiencing the pain from your childhood, a failed marriage, emotional or physical trauma of any sort. Be encouraged today knowing that you will live through all of this.

Writing this book with my Mom was the hardest out of all the (eight) books I’ve written. Why? Because I had to accept the fact that my Mom and I remember certain things differently and where it was traumatic for me a lot of those things she was able to “block out” of her memory. However, I have yet been able to do so. But that is the interesting thing about relationships, none are perfect but are necessary. You can’t just divorce your family; although some people try. I believe the Lord has given us the family we have for a reason; a purpose; to help birth out of us all He has placed within us.

After a fabulous event on Saturday, I was awakened at 4AM with an upset stomach and tears streaming down my face as I relived the trauma of my childhood when my mom was married to her second husband (who physically abused me.) I didn’t call anyone because I didn’t think anyone would understand and besides I was embarrassed because my Mom and I had literally just released this new book that was already helping many especially those who attended the event.

I admit, in those moments I cried out to God asking Him why did I have to do this? I remember the ache in my heart being so severe that I thought I was having a heart attack. I remember coaching myself through various breathing techniques.

In that moment I grew angry with my Mom all over again. I was confused as to what I was feeling and even questioned God, “Will this pain ever go away permanently?” I began to regret hosting the event and writing the book. The cost was too severe. Having that conversation live was like someone had yanked the scab off my wounds.

After crying out to the Lord in prayer I learned that more healing was needed in my life as well as between my Mom and I. Often times as writers and even artists the words we write, or the pictures we paint are to bring personal healing into our lives first.

Being led to turn on the television, I came across the Unsung story of Marvin Sapp. He shared how each of his songs that hit the Billboard charts were all birthed out of tremendously painful experiences such as the lost of his father, his wife and beyond. He said he remembered telling God “I don’t know if I want another #1 record. It cost too much.”

I too can relate to this because every book I’ve written have become a best seller (with my 1st book, The Power in Waiting & The Entrepreneur Blueprint being my TOP best-sellers) and cost me tremendously. Since 2013 I have been sharing different portions of my story in different books and now I am ready to shift into writing novels.

In an effort to experience deeper healing I created a character named Chelsea (whom I introduced in my book: Turbulence) whom I get to use to release all of the creativity I have bottled up inside. There are certain parts of my story that I don’t feel comfortable sharing however, the great thing about novels is you can write a “fictional” story that may include some of your life truths. How awesome is that?

(In Florida on Vacation this past weekend)

Writing has always therapeutic for me although it’s not easy being transparent I always feel much better after I share especially after I receive feedback from others who have shared the same experiences as I have and my story encouraged them not to give up on life.

If you are going through a tough time remember this: The suffering of your present time isn’t worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. (Romans 8:18) Despite what it may currently feel like, know that all you are facing now is only temporary. Sure, you may be facing a tremendous mountain but remember you have the power to declare a thing and it shall be so! (Mark 11:23)

There is comfort in God’s presence as well as His word. Whatever you are in the midst of working on today I encourage you to FINISH! Sure, it may cause you great pain but God needs people in the earth who are willing to echo His voice in the Earth and in order to reign with God we must also be willing to suffer with Him. (II Timothy 2:12).

I encourage you to grab a copy of my Mom & I new book, Redeeming the Time which is guaranteed to provide a deeper outlook on the value of relationships not only between mother and daughter but monogamous and platonic connections as well.

No relationship is beyond repair and either we surrender to the healing process now or later; either way eventually we will have to deal with the hurt, pain, frustrations, disappointments, unforgiveness; and decide to forgive and work through our process.

In the world we live in today we all have encountered hurt and pain as well as experienced betrayal and disappointment. However, the key to living a successful life full of healing, wholeness and prosperity is learning to release and let go!

Number one, we must learn to release people who have hurt or disappointed us all while not forgetting to release ourselves in the process. To release someone can also be viewed as forgiving them and releasing what they did to you. Too many are bound today by people who are either a.) no longer among the living or b.) have moved on with their lives. One of the greatest tragedies is to allow the issues of life to put you on pause and keep you from living the purpose filled life you were predestined to live.

We must also learn to love ourselves while we are in the process of becoming who we were originally created to be. Refuse to allow your current dilemmas, setbacks or addictions to cause you to love yourself even less. Know that God chose you before the foundation of this world and He never expected you to be fully qualified for He has that portion covered.

Remember this: God doesn’t call the qualified but He qualifies the called!

Number two, we must learn to let go of the people who hurt us. This includes family members and friends as well as teachers, coworkers, church family; etc. Whatever they did is not worth holding on to and by harboring the offense or un-forgiveness you will end up with a sick soul.

I want to encourage you through this acronym of G.R.O.W.T.H:

G- rab ahold of God’s vision for your life. Vision comes from God not man. No matter how many prophetic lines you stand in, or $100 lines you are manipulated into, vision can not be bought, but only birthed through prayer and communion with God.

R- come into the REALIZATION that you are enough and God chose you! Release feelings of unworthiness knowing that you are joint heir of Christ and you are forgiven and you are worthy of being the child of THE KING!

O-pen your heart and let God and people in. Trust God to protect you from perpetrators. Sure, guard your heart but do not gate it. When we gate our hearts nothing can come in and nothing can go out. Life is all about relationships. Aren’t you tired of appearing connected when you really are disconnected? Relationships and friendships take work but God is all about them both. Refuse to allow the pain of your past to cause you to trust again. Not everyone is out to hurt you.

W-in others over with love! We must get back to sharing the love of God on a consistent basis. We don’t have to beat people over the head with our Bibles but we love them back to Christ. It is by loving kindness that we are drawn unto Him.

T- ell the devil NO! When he wants you to use your pain as an excuse to disconnect and become isolated; tell him NO! It’s a set up and a trap to get you alone so he can attack you! Solitude is when you are in a place with God but isolation is when you are all alone. Choose to enter a place of solitude but be careful not to shut down and shut others out due to pride or fear of being hurt because that enables the adversary to have an upper hand on you. For where two or more are gathered in the name of Jesus, He shall be in the midst! We are not designed to make it in this world alone. We were created to need one another!

H- elp and build- Life is all about helping others along this journey called life. Extend grace to others that was once extended to you. This is how Women of Standard was birthed out of my desire to be encouraged and in helping others God was helping me. It was in operating in what I now know was purpose that caused my healing process to begin. Choose to help others and build them up where you may even have been torn down.

Know that healing is essential for G.R.O.W.T.H.!

Check out my live training/teaching on this subject matter and be sure to subscribe to my You Tube channel to be notified whenever I release new videos!

“I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of your wonderful deeds.”~Psalms 9:1~

Hello again! What a great way to jump start your week by learning more ways to trigger your happiness. As you may already know, I am a book lover and Valorie Burton is one of my favorite authors and I am currently still reading her book, Happy Women Live Better: 13 Ways to Trigger Your Happiness Every Day!

Trigger #5 is gratitude. Inside her book Valorie shares that gratitude is simply the expression of thankfulness for the blessings of life. She also shares special emphasis on the fact that it is God’s grace and love that abounds.

Valorie goes on to say that counting your blessings is another way to keep you happier, healthier and better rested and has also been confirmed by researchers in multiple articles. She encourages you to begin your gratitude habit by keeping a notebook at your bedside and when you awaken in the morning ask yourself a simple question that evokes gratitude, such as, “What three things do I most look forward to today?” Remember she mentioned previously that trigger #1 was anticipation (having great expectation of something great happening to you.)

Therefore, simply put, find a way to be happy, joyful and full of the love of God while focusing on all that is right in your life rather than focusing on what is wrong. We all have so much to be grateful and thankful for and it has been proven that when we show acts of kindness to others it sends off happy triggers all throughout our body. So friend, be sure to do what you must to remain in your “happy place”. You will hear me speak of that place often because it’s very important that your reside there.

Anything or anyone that disrupts your peace do your best to minimize your interactions with them. Now, I’m sure there are some people you simply can’t get away from such as your co-worker, a family member or perhaps even your spouse. But one of the things that help me in dealing with difficult people is the fact that I have a choice to allow what they say or do to infect me (deeper than affecting you) or simply roll off my back. I often have to remind myself not to take personal attacks personally and to never under any circumstances am I to give my personal power away. Sometimes you simply have to make a decision and declare aloud, “Devil NOT TODAY!”

Did you know that when you allow someone to cause you to react rather than respond you actually give away your personal power and allow them to control you by their words or actions? Make a decision today to no longer allow this to happen to you. Now, don’t be too hard on yourself for we have all been there but the key is not to remain there.

Here’s some important things to ask yourself when you find yourself in heated fellowship (argument or a tense situation or environment):

– Will what they have said or done matter six months from now?

– Is it really that serious?

– Is this worth me losing sleep or even my cool over?

I’m sure the answer to each will be ABSOLUTELY NOT!

Friends remember life is precious and you must do everything you can to remain in your happy place and allow yourself to be controlled by nothing or no one except the Holy Spirit. Remember that life is precious, therefore, focus on things that make you happy rather than things that make you sad. Spend time with people who increase your energy and levels of creativity rather than deplete them. Know that it is your divine right to be whole, healed and happy!

Make it a great day and remember I’d love to hear from you! Email me at Carla@CarlaCannon.com! Until next time…

Hello and welcome to Empowerment Monday!!!!!! As you can see I am having a very colorful start and today thus far has been absolutely amazing!!!! It is my goal today to change your mindset and mentality toward Mondays. Too many people are dreading the idea of having to get up out of their bed and begin their day simply because it’s Monday!

I too understand how it can be to dread going to a job that you hate, or to awaken to the same pain you felt the night before praying and wishing that you could possibly sleep it away but sometimes life just doesn’t work that way! Today, I want to share with you how to SNATCH BACK your happiness NOW!

I am currently reading a book by one of my favorite authors and speakers, Valorie Burton entitled, “Happy Women Live Better: 13 Ways to Trigger Your Happiness Every Day”. For the next 12 days I have committed to reading one trigger per day (while no the elliptical or treadmill) and applying them to my daily life.

One thing you may not know about me is that I once wrestled with depression and my emotions would often go up and down; I literally felt like a yo-yo. I could be having a great day then all of a sudden one phone call, one person cutting me off on the highway, one unexpected bill had the ability to do something different. Well, like I am encouraging you to do, I had to learn to SNATCH BACK my life and not allow myself to be controlled by anything or anyone except the Holy Spirit!

Inside Valorie’s book I learned that Trigger #1 is: ANTICIPATION. She shares that is important to have at least one thing you look forward to EVERY day. Whether it is seeing your honey, greeting your children as they arrive home from school in the afternoon, seeing your favorite movie, meeting with your team; etc.

Valorie shares if there is not anything currently on your schedule for you to look forward to, then create it! Meaning don’t wait for a friend to invite you to an event or outing, but you be proactive and invite him or her to join you! She also went on to share how we must learn to be present in the moment. In a society where everyone’s eyes are glued to their cell phones email and social media she shares the importance of “savoring the moment” and not allowing yourself to miss the moment because you are more concerned about sharing the moment than actually enjoying it. This really stuck with me because I am so quick to share things rather than enjoy them and share them later. Trust, I’ll be keeping Valorie’s advice in mind moving forward.

Valorie went on to share 5 Simple Ways to Build Anticipation:

1. Set a goal: You all know my favorite saying, “A goal without a strategic plan of action is simply a wish.” Valorie says your goal does not have to be to conquer the world but you must be willing to conquer your current day. Isn’t that powerful? Why focus on conquering the world when you can literally only live one day at a time therefore, why not enjoy it!

2. Make a list of simple pleasures: Write out what makes you happy; what you enjoy that adds laughter, smiles and joy to your day. Eliminate anything that depletes you and takes away from you enjoying your current moment. Here is where you may have to re-evaluate friendships and relationships as well as establishing much need boundaries to protect your “happy place”.

3. Talk About It: Valorie say share your anticipation with others. Talking about what you are looking forward to increases your anticipation which in turn triggers your happiness and brings great joy your way.

4. Add to the Joy: Include others in your “happy” moments. Perhaps invite a friend to join you in the park, or at your favorite coffee shop or book store. Be open to being creative in order to add to the joy.

5. Count Down: Be a kid about what you are anticipating to take place in your life. Count down. Write it on the white board in your office, change out a sticky note on your frig or mirror daily reminding yourself of what you have to look forward to!

Implement these 5 simple ways to build anticipation and SNATCH BACK your life! Know that life is worth living, but you must tap into your creative power and remember that you are responsible for the outcome of your life. Your divine happiness does not lay on the shoulders of anyone else except yours. Take steps to getting back to happy or remaining in that happy place daily. Sure things will happen, but you deal with them, release them and get right back to your happy place!

Next week we will tackle trigger #2: SMILE! Get ready for your journey of overcoming depression and getting back to happy with your Transformational Coach, using this book as a tool!!!!!

Not long ago we honored/remembered the innocent lives of nearly 3,000+ people which were lost on September 11, 2001 where terrorists attacked the Unites States. They hijacked four airplanes in mid-flight and flew two of the planes into two skyscrapers at the World Trade Center in New York City. The impact caused the buildings to catch fire and collapse. Another plane destroyed part of the Pentagon (the U.S. military headquarters) in Arlington, Virginia. The fourth plane then crashed in Shanksville, Pennsylvania. Officials believe that the terrorists on that plane intended to destroy either the White House or the U.S. Capitol.

Those who survived this attack were left severely wounded and this is where I gained to title: Wounded Warriors from. Just as in the natural we experience various attacks which can wear on my physical bodies, we can also undergo spiritual attacks which can weigh on us mentally and spiritually.

During my time of prayer the Lord showed me there were many wounded warriors among us today that never stepped foot in Iraq or never engaged in a physical war here on the earth but were engaging in spiritual warfare which took place in their mind, body and spirit.

God began to show me that we have a lot of people encouraging, ministering and empowering others who really need to be encouraged, ministered to and empowered themselves. So many of them have been not just hurt but wounded by people they once trusted, betrayed by those who walked the closest to them and denied by those who were supposed to have their back.

I began to intercede for these individuals being reminded of this feeling for I knew it all too well. You see, society teaches us that no matter what keep moving; keep pushing and keep moving forward in life! We hear this so much to the point that we never take time to treat our wounds. We never take time to acknowledge the hurt, the betrayal or even the events that almost took us out of here if not physically, then spiritually.

Many are doing great things in the body of Christ but often lack the true power of God because we are so busy trying to be Superman and Superwoman pushing ourselves into believing that we can do what only God can do. Sure, we shall do greater works! But we spend so much energy trying to get others to live right instead of ensuring our own foot doesn’t slip in the process. We are so quick to put our mouths on others only to forget that we were once where they are now.

WOUNDED WARRIORS. These are people who do great things in the name of Jesus but it’s in vain because it gets to a point where they begin to operate out of religion and a repeated cycle instead of being led by the Holy Spirit. I believe there comes a time when we literally may have to shut everything down and be honest with God and cry out to Him and tell him we are hurting, tell him we are in pain, tell him we are literally fighting for our lives and truth is we don’t want anyone to know because what will they think of us? What about all the encouraging words we have been sharing with others? Why is it not working for us? Why don’t we apply our own words to our current situation but instead we’d rather walk around like everything is okay. When on the inside we are broken, crying ourselves to sleep at night, crying out to God in the midnight hour or even worst taking pills to stay awake during the day and taking pills to get us through the night.

If you are suffering from any of the above I mentioned then you are indeed a wounded warrior in need of repair. Often times we are so accustomed to fighting that we can’t accept God’s word when He says vengeance belongs to Him according to Deuteronomy 32:35.

I want you to know that it is okay to be honest about how we feel. The Bible never tells us not to acknowledge our true feelings, it only tells us not to be led by them. Trust me, hurt people hurt people and if you are wounded and have yet to be healed you are hurting others in ways you may not even be aware of.

Here are a few ways you can overcome and transition from a wounded warrior to a healed warrior who is indeed a force to be reckoned with:

Be honest about the pain you feel- Cast all of your cares upon the Lord, for He cares for you! (I Peter 5:7)

Submit to Prayer & begin to pray for the people or individual who hurt you. Or perhaps you need to forgive yourself for something you have done. Know that God loves you and He’ll never leave and forsake you. He is one you can share your deepest secrets with and never have to worry about being exposed as long as you have a repentant and sincere heart. Remember God chastens those whom He loves and it is to convict you not condemn you (for condemnation is not of God- Romans 8:1)

Declare the Word of God over your situation- We are instructed to speak what God’s word says about us and not get stuck in what things appear to be in the natural. Be careful with this part because without proper balance you can end up living in a state of denial. Face your truth. Be honest about where you are. But also, know that God loves you too much for you to remain where you are. Cast down any thoughts that are not of God and that do not draw you closer to Him (II Corinthians 10:5) Remember you control your thoughts and anything the enemy offers you are merely suggestions which you can deny and say “NO!” to! Just because a thought crosses your mind does not mean you should go ahead and do it! No, talk back to the enemy and speak aloud what the Word of God says about your situation.

Now that you know how to get out of a wounded state to a healed state I want you to declare aloud:

“Yes, I was hurt, but I have acknowledged it and now I am healed!”

“Yes, I made some mistakes but I will not allow it to hinder me from transforming into who Christ created me to be!”

“I forgive every person who has ever hurt me!”

“I am whole, healed and free in Jesus!”

“I have laid aside every weight and I now carry unspeakable joy in my heart which is indeed my strength according to Nehemiah 8:10!”

“I am the righteousness of God and I am a true warrior but every now and then warriors have to take time to cater to their own wounds so they can go back out and fight the good fight of faith!”

“I no longer try to fight a spiritual battle in my flesh for the real war goes on in the spirit!”

My friend I am so proud of you and I want you to know that old things have passed away and behold all things have become new. Take time for you on today. It’s okay to take a break from social media, so shut down your emails, text messages and phone calls because the pressures of life can really drain us if we allow it. Go on a mini vacation even if you have to get a hotel for a night just to have a change of scenery. Take your bible and your Ipad with your favorite worship music and just steal away with Jesus. I promise you will leave His presence completely restored, healed and full of His love. Go in peace & know that I am always here to pray you through!

If this blog touched your heart and was truly for you please email me directly at Carla@WomenofStandard.org. Know that you are not alone. I too have been a wounded warrior. I was giving all I had to others so to the point I was left with nothing. No one could pick me up in the spirit and tell I was broken in the midst of my smiles, Facebook posts and while encouraging others. But guess what? God didn’t allow me to. He instructs us to work out our own soul salvation with fear and trembling and so what no one called or no one could tell I was hurting, God was there all along and He didn’t allow them to come to my rescue because guess what? Then I would develop an unconscious habit of depending on them instead of Him. Be blessed and know that you are not alone and where you are you do not have to remain. The choice is yours!