To My Good Friend

To my good friend
Why did I have not a word to say?
Yet we just kept moving on our unsteady way
Was it just me; did we not see a day when love was free.
What was I to do we got old it happens we changed.

Don't look at me like that I am sorry I got so mad
How dare you, make me so sad
I guess I still just cannot let it go
However, I did love you

I am in love again as I was with you
He is a good man
We are getting married someday soon
He has a fast car an a good job

What happened with us?
Why did we give up so fast?
Why did you give up on me first?
Why why why why!!!

I am still angry with you because of this
I hated you; loved you
What was I to do?
At that time

So thank you
For being my first
Thank you for showing me love
Moreover, pain

No wait that is not true
The love was it real
The pain that was me hurting wanting
From things only I could see
Moreover, I am sorry for blaming them on you

When I was a younger one
You where my lover
I had so many dreams
For us

I wanted to have your baby
In addition, I tried to do that
Nevertheless, it never happened
I hated me for that
However, I never told you

Did you know I use to cry my self to sleep?
Because of you
I would not show it on the outside
Nevertheless, I did almost every night

I would cry
When you drank to much beer
I would cry
When you were not there to hold back my pain
I would cry
When you smoked to much weed
And I would cry
When you could not say I love you

Can you see it now do you understand
Why I loved you
Moreover, why it was wrong of you
I wish I knew you and loved you as a sober man

You never gave me that side of you
That is when my love turned to distrust
Moreover, hope turned to pain
And my heart to stone

But this new man in my life
Broke away the stone
Around my heart
And set it free
God I love him so

I just wanted you to know
I am so happy now
He is the one

Thank you for this life lesson
And for opening my eyes
As well as my hart

I love this poem. I am with this man that pretty much loves weed. Been with him for 3 years. He knows that he has to give it up to be with me because he wants a wife and family to come home to.... About 2 months ago, I got tired of being betrayed and lied to so I started packing my stuff. He begged me to stay saying that he will do everything in his power to change even if it kills him. Now still badly hurt, I find it hard to trust. Hard to believe after hearing it all before. Hard to have hope in the relationship. I feel completely broken inside