The last days I’ve been engaged in a very interesting conversation with my friend Richard, who’s a beautiful young guy, so clear and clean in his masculine energy, and deeply committed to growing, taking responsibility and expanding the existing paradigm. Our conversation grew out of a mutual feeling that our…

Our world is evolving. And fast; in fact it’s changing so fast that our minds struggle to make sense of what we experience. Rapid shifts in culture, technology, politics and ecology are impacting our capacity to make meaning of our reality. So how do we grow to adapt to this…

Part of my passion in doing men’s work is to support men to move more into alignment with truth. Truth is an essential element of being because when we are speaking and moving in the world from a place of truth we are in integrity. When we come out of…

I’m really excited about a new direction that a part of my work is taking. I feel really honoured that more and more men are approaching me to work with them to support them and I feel moved to put out a note on my take on men’s work. It…

Lately my mind has turned to thinking about big topics such as human evolution! I’m interested in the shift that we’re experiencing in society and where we go next. Here are my simplistic musings on these massive topics. If I consider human history I could argue that it’s evolution could…

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about order and chaos, about how they’re showing up in the world and also about the necessary balance of them within relationship. It’s clear that we are living in unprecedented times. The world is changing and everywhere we look we can see the failings…

I believe that the #metoo movement has been a watershed moment in human history. It has shed a spotlight on the unhealthy immature masculine domination of the feminine in the most public way. But the suppression of the feminine is far more than that. The immature masculine has dominated the…

When addressing trauma it is important to understand that there are two very distinct types of trauma that we will come across. What is Trauma? First let’s define trauma. DSM-V (the US psychiatric manual for psychological disorders) defines trauma as “Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual…

When working with both trauma and sexual energy it is absolutely essential to move slowly and not to overwhelm the client’s system. I will talk later about resourcing the client. This is the process of ensuring that the client has sufficient self-awareness and ability to self-regulate their nervous system without…

To develop as human beings, especially as socially engaged beings allowing connection with others, that is to say, intimacy, we must allow ourselves to walk in unknown territory, since each of us has wounds and traumas that inhibit our being in our fullness, especially when relating to other people. As…

I was in bed, lost in a haze of anger. At the surface level I was upset about something Mike had done. I was angry and blaming him for my emotional state. At the deeper levels, of course it was not about what Mike had said or done. Something from…

Have you ever taken one step forward to find yourself two steps back? When you start working on yourself life is likely to become a rollercoaster of highs and lows. We take a leap of faith into a new experience or a new way of being, only to be followed…

Since my appearance on Chanel 5’s Make or Break, “pussy power” has been the buzzword. Combined with the message that “a woman’s power is not up here, but down in her vagina”, it’s left a lot of people amused, some provoked and others just plainly curious. What is it? How…

How are you ever going to feel good about yourself if your girlfriend (or your mum) has got your balls in a jar?? Many men of all ages I speak to feel in some ways disempowered in their lives. They don’t know what they want and they can’t seem to…

Our whole culture tells us that we should do more, do it faster, do it now – not just in sex but also in everything we do. All these messages may lead us to feel that we should speed up and that packing in more experiences, more work, more play…

My beloved and I had an argument this morning. That’s not especially noteworthy in itself. We argue sometimes just like any other couple, no matter how well attuned we are with one another. The content of the argument isn’t even important. What does feel interesting however is the way we…

By any standards, 2016 was one hell of a year for most people. Horrors from Syria, the continued threat of terrorism and the geo-political upheavals that we saw have made most of us more on-edge than usual. I had my own personal battles with professional and personal challenges and issues…

What is Presence? You hear it a lot in various new age, conscious sexuality or therapy worlds – it’s all about Presence. A woman wants her man to be Present. It’s by being Present that we allow the magic, and so on and so on. So I started to ask…

“So do guys really just want to have quick sex and cum?” a client asked me the other day. Here’s the age old problem; women typically want longer sex sessions, with more of a build up of erotic energy, guys tend to want to move ahead to “the main event”…

In the new world of relationships and the new age sex and spirit movement, the terms masculine and feminine have been co-opted to apply to a range of behavioural characteristics. This new approach, often arising from tantra and Taoist traditions helped to broaden out many people’s understanding of traditional male…