She's got a crush on life

A letter to the girl behind the mask

Dear Charlee,

I wish sometimes you’d be more honest with yourself. It’s so easy to smile and get on with life but if you ever just stopped and looked around you’d see that all those things you try to hide from everyone isn’t actually hidden at all. People can see the vulnerable little girl that’s so desperate to get out and say so much, to love someone, to have someone love you. It isn’t a bad thing to be vulnerable y’know. It’s quite normal, everyone at some point in their lives will experience it and you should be proud that you’re able to experience such emotion. No one will think any less of you, if anything they’ll think much more of you. For being strong when for so long you’ve actually been incredibly weak.

A lot of people love you. You know this. You are an exceptionally good human being with such a beautiful heart. You feel so strongly for those who are hurting and you will always put others first. So why is it so wrong for you to feel the same emotions as these people you are so keen to help. Do you judge those? No. So why judge yourself??

I hate it when you look in the mirror and tell yourself you aren’t worth it. You’re beautiful. I know you think everyone just says that to make you feel better but you really are. You’ve got a beautiful soul and it shines through out of your eyes. It’s hard to hide when you’re feeling down. Your eyes show it. Your eyes are showing it now. You aren’t yourself but you won’t be beaten and it’s so frustrating to watch you beat yourself up.

You know that the universe is waiting to give you real love, you know how much the universe loves you and it’s not just going to send you any old piece of crap. You need the real thing, that unconditional feeling that not everyone gets to experience. You will, and you know he’s on his way. Just believe in yourself, you want a man who is going to look after you but who is going to put you in line when you need to be. He can’t do that whilst you are busy beating yourself up. He needs you at your best.

Stop going back to the past. It was never always your fault. Life is full of ups and downs, lessons, teaching. Shit happens. You aren’t the only one it’s happened to and you sure as hell are lucky compared to some of the break ups and heart breaks I’ve seen.

Darling, put yourself out there. Don’t be shy, or scared, or pretend to be that person you aren’t. Someone is going to fall so hard in love with you that you’ll understand why it took so long. He’s going to make you realise how amazing you are and he’s going to help you finally love yourself. It’s going to be wonderful.

Get out there, swallow that pride and don’t give one hoot about what anyone thinks of you, anyone who looks down on you or who judges you. You give advice every day of your life so start following that advice yourself and practice what you preach.