Remember the eight years of peace prosperity, and progressive government that followed after Ralph Nader's 2000 to provide a third-party alternative for ideologically pure Democrats? How about when John Anderson did the same thing in 1980, giving us the greatest political shift in my lifetime for 12 years because Jimmy Carter was too Establishment for the Real Progressives? If I didn't think history was bullshit and too tl;dr for anyone but old people and Boomer sell outs to pay any attention to, I'd almost think you Bernie-or-busters believe in your poor idealistic hearts that this is the year when 120 years of American political history reverse themselves because of your golden, shining, brand-new progressive vision--or you're the kind of rich white douchebag who secretly wouldn't mind helping elect Trump because at least the government wouldn't take so much of your hard-earned tax money to give to freeloaders.

Bernie Sanders is 2016speak for Ralph Nader. Remember the eight years of peace, prosperity, and progressive government that followed because the Democrats didn't offer a progressive enough candidate? Or the same thing in 1980, when John Anderson helped elect Ronald Reagan for a 12-year liberal reign? Of course, you Wise Progressives know that everything is different this time because Hillary believes climate change is a hoax and that millions of immigrants without papers should be deported immediately and that women are for fuckng and looking pretty, not opening their big yaps and running around acting like sluts and Black Lives Matter is a bunch of whiners who are mad about not getting free things and history is bullshit anyway. There really would be no difference between a Trump Administration and a Clinton II administration, would there?