Archive for videogames

What is the struggle against good and evil like I struggle against spec. Evil must be defeated but once evil is gone will the good become the evil? What is even reality like could it not be real? These are topics that I grasped with in CC. I am still haunted by them every day. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even worth it. Because maybe spec is only a homunculus in my brain. What is meaning in defeating spec if there is no meaning. or is man supposed to defeat Christ like Niche. A great thinker in the mind columbia creates, but spec destroys,but I destroy the destroyer, so who will destroy the destroyer destroyer. Maybe the USS William P Lawrence. but he who destroys destruction is himself a creator and god of his own universe like a pheonix from the flames.

Only history will tell the tale of a great man who stood up to the demon. Till spec is ashes. Till spec is ashes.

much blood and ink has been spilled over the above facebook post, but will will not rehash the debate that keeps lambo zang up at night furiously typing into the bwog comments section.

Instead let us take a look at the surprisingly OVER looked question which will haunt us immemorial. Consider exhibit A:

Does anyone have a CC section taught by a professor of color.

Let us parse. Anyone is the subject. Does ANYONE have a cc section taught by a professor of color. At first glance, this seems to be a simple question. Perhaps the author is conducting a poll of the relative frequency of instructors of color amongst the class of 2016 to validate the supposedly official statistics that columbia releases to relieve themselves of the burden of white guilt. (this would be an admirable cause, but sadly it is not what our friend is doing here). However, this text is complicated by the addition of the second section.

Section 2: “Flexible on time/days”.

Suddenly the curtain has been pulled back. The true intent behind this question is revealed. Close reading of the text shows that in fact the question is not simply informational, and that one can infer an attempt to coordinate some sort of activity involving the author as well as the aforementioned instructor of color.

Section 3: “The teacup”

The teacup just reaffirms her support for tea.

Exhibit B: The supportive friend

Everyone has a friend, or if they do not they wish they had a friend so for the purposes of our analysis we can assume they have a friend. But does your friend unconditionally shower praise upon you for performing an informal internet survey? Most likely not, unless you paid them to, but a paid friend is not actually a friend you should have learned that by now.

The 100 here has also been suggested by Ruden, et. al. to be an answer to the question rather than an exclamation of praise. However, modern research has cast doubt on the idea that a single student would be enrolled in 100 classess taught by professors of color simultaneously. Further attempts to tally the hundreds results a grand total of nearly a thousand, which does not make the proposition any more tenable.

Exhibit C: “The magnum opus”

Suddenly, our heroine returns to settle the score. Although we know that authorial intent is irrelevant, here the author comes to clarify, with the phrase “more specifically I am asking…” This offers a glimmer of hope that we will be able to understand what she is saying, but nay, it is a false hope. Several fetal sentences have been grafted together into a chimeral behemoth. Attached to the tail is the phrase “it is important to my health and my life thanks”. This indicates that the beast it is attached to is personally important to her physical or mental well-being, or perhaps just necessary for the ritual known as “life thanks” (also known as saying grace). But what exactly is so important to her “health” and “life thanks”? Clearly it involves some sort of “switch[ing] sections w[ith] me”, but the exact nature of the the switch, and the other parties involved, remains mysterious. Three possible interpretations have been advanced by various levels of Aegean thought.

The first interpretation suggests that the author began with the intent to switch sections with a white person who is in a CC section with a Professor of color. Notice that her stance has evolved since the original post. Not only has she narrowed the search to switch with only white people (white hispanics likely remain in a grey area as always), but additionally she has decided that the instructor must be a Professor (it’s unclear if adjunct professors count). However, according to this interpretation, she amends her options, and considers that she would also be willing to switch with a student of color. Note that she does not require the student of color to have a CC professor of color. It seems that the color is commutative.

The second camp has suggested that the first camp is a bunch of morons for thinking that’s what she meant. They suggest instead that the addtional group of students of color to which she is extending the offer of the switch is also bound to the requirements of having an instructor of color and also it cant just be any old instructor its gotta be a professor. This group advances the argument that she is colorblind, and so would not discriminate against whichever student she switches with. White and black students follow the same rule that they need a black CC professor, and so they can live in harmony together.

The third camp thinks the first two camps are a bunch of imbeciles. To this camp, the sentence is grammatically clear, and it is obvious to them that “another student of color” is part of the direct object, not the subject. Read this way, the author is suggesting that a white person who has a professor of color must switch places with any person of color (including the author herself). Likely expressing a form of OCD where like colors must be organized together, this swap would indubitably improve her quality of life thanks. You are very welcome.

Who is right in the end I do not know sometime things are unknown because nobody knows them. Unfortunately we cannot rely on the author to clarify further because that’s what she did and it just made things more confusing so maybe she has a future writing postmodern philosophy.

ps. i just squinted and looked at the coffee cup and it kinda looks like a thumbs up so maybe it’s a hidden message

Consider that specsucks has used our vampire powers to infilitrate the confines of the spec state prison. These are exlusive leaks like guantanamo:

Wow looks normal my loyal readers hipster computers for specster scum to upload their instagram and crosstag it with tumblr. Well of course this is true but also LOOK AGAIN

So I don’t need to read animal farm to know that spec is PURE WIND. But the antichrist will bring redemption. You make lies sound truthful spec but just because you can fool everyone does not mean your lies are not OBVIOUS to see! YOU will not last long with such obvious corruption on your soul.

Ok so for example in anceint times people were tortured in badass shit like ripped limb from limb by horses and then maybe they were reanimimated by necromancers or they were put into an iron maiden like the badass hxc metal band. OBVIOSLY spec is not that dum or at least they are hiding it somewhere BUT where would they hide it? I don’t know we are still learning of course BE PATIENT. We haven’t heard about it of course so you think it isn’t happening spec is not creating a prison. But if you have read fukault (get it) you know then that they would obviously not put they’re prison into open daylite.

Jk. BEHOLD THE PANOPTICON MADE REAL. Oh wait you can see through the glass. So you KNOW you are being monitored which is the antithesis of the prison-state industrial complex. Spec u need to be disciplined and punished and not in a sexy way. #snowden

i went on a date to the movies (yes that is right i have friends you losers) so i saw a movie that was realy cool and that’s why we’re doing a movie review every third of a week.

basically there is an evil organization in space which is shooting laser missiles at people. so like there is this cool hacker on earth

who is like the cloaked mask because he is a cool hacker. and then the dark hand is also like a guy who is harassed by children

but he is going to class to work hard like a loyal citizen of the columbia community but then he is like trapped in a chamber with bwog and he gets too much exposure which makes him get cancer becuz everyone knows his name now and stuff

so basically he is dead and even the deans now know his name. but then the cloaked mask has a plan wiht some surgery to make him into an ubermensch.

and there is also the crazy austrialian dude who is actually a robot or something

and he is like a lone wolf but he is secretly taking orders from the head of the evil space company

so mat damon is going to space to fight the evil corporation because the hacker dude helps to send people to space but they sometimes to not make it because the australian dude has space missiles in a van.

but the australian dude kidnaps matt damons girlfriend and she is hostage

so mat damon has to blow his head off with a grenade. but not before he steals her soul

and then matt damon sacrifices himself like jesus and spec collapses and everyone gets saved even the little girl with cancer. the end.

overall this movie was awesome 10/10. especially this part (ladies he is taken)

9 to 11 days ago the holiday of 9/11 began. it seems like some of you dont know what “never forget” means. spec is not dead just like

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed

and we are also taking spect to the supreme court.

so obviously you should not read the spect for news (it is dum). but that does not mean you should not use it in other ways. that is just good business practice. so here are a few ways you can use the spect without having to read it and risk getting eye transpolants later in your life.

1. demon pirate hat

this is obvious if you went to kindergarten, but you can make it into a demon pirate hat which looks like a cool demon goth pirate who is into death and stuff

2. rain gear

like in romantic comedies, you can put it over your head and exageratedly take really small steps until a handsome stranger offers you protection from the blood raining from the sky

3. pets

if you are training a black dragon this will keep excrement off of yoru floors. or if you need to discipline the dragon, roll the spect up up so you can smack the puppy with the spect. but dont get too frisky

4. ninja stars

these are fun to throw in the back of classes and you can be the ninja

5. wrapping stuff

if it is christmas or a birthday you can wrap a gift. or if it is the 1950s you can wrap a dead body in newspaper (note to the police this does not count as a confession and you havent read me my miranda rights).

spec has been cursed by their supposed independent but if they are independent from columbia then how do they have a table at the activities fair? this is the dark underbelly of spec. more are initiated into the order than you know.