I find that many people are on a never ending quest to change their life, and their results are temporary at best. Changing how you respond to life provides lasting change.

There is a difference between putting up with your life and changing your response to it. The former keeps an undercurrent of dissatisfaction boiling; the latter brings cool refreshment.

Changing your life is filled with thoughts and desires to change your scenery. I don't know who said the following quote first, but whoever they are, it was genius: "Wherever you go, there you are."

It indicates that you are taking you and your programmed reactions wherever you go. That means your behavior is your shadow. The new scenery often becomes the old scenery. The only thing that has changed is the zip code.

We often take the view that life is happening to me. It's most useful to shorten that phrase to "Life is happening." When we add "to me," we personalize our reactions rather than viewing them as the robotic behavior they are.

Pure and simple, the quality of our life is made up of how we respond to reality.

Reminds me of yesterday . . .

My buddy and I were paired up with two guys we didn't know to play a round of golf – Biil and Tom. Tom was the better golfer of the two and he was consistent. He rarely miss-hit a shot – until the last two holes.

He made about 4 or 5 errant shots on the last two holes, more than he had hit the entire round. He went into a reactionary tailspin. Tom was no longer on the golf course; he was in his head and it was a long, loud visit. He cursed everything but the moon. You could take Tom to the most prestigious golf course in the world and his reaction would have been the same. Tom and his reactions were one.

Tom didn't need to be separated from his scenery; he needed to be separated from his reactions.

Reacting to life gives us a predictable, programmed outcome – the same one we had last time. Responding to life always offers us a choice.

I'm certain Tom will repeat yesterday's tirade for the rest of his golf playing days, unless he recognizes that he has a choice. I'm not betting that will happen for Tom, but it can happen for you and me when we recognize our reactions aren't suiting us to a tee.

When we take the time to choose a response to life rather than reacting, we may find that our problem was our programming, not life itself. Reality visits everyday and the more often we react to it, the less life we live. Responses are not as quick as reactions; they're further back in the pack. But remember, the race doesn't always go to the swiftest.

Recognize that you are reacting and you open up a new door of possibility – Choice.

Choosing a response to reality will change your life. It will give you the freedom that you have been looking for your entire life – the freedom to choose.