External links.

Translation

Karaoke.

OP. I think it’s great, although the English translation of this line and the following one could use a little more. The full line is “I want to do something that no one else can imitate.” But if we’re talking about Haruka and Yuu reaffirming their friendship by doing something they would “never do with anyone else,” then this lyric would be the perfect opportunity to create that allusion.

ED. It’s also good, though it suffers from a couple of literal derp lines like the one above. Also missing a “Love” at the end.

Main Script.

To be fair, I thought the original Japanese “joke” didn’t appeal to my hairy gaijin sense of humor either. Only one group (SHiN-gxYuru Yuri Lazy Lily) made an honest attempt to put any sort of “heh” factor into this line while preserving the whole “see the chick as a dude” punchline. Here Mezashite tried adapting the line, which I felt was not executed well.

Yoroshiku harorin!

All I was left thinking after reading this line was, “A classroom used to be just like a lesbian couple?” This line, while it’s not a mistake in a strict sense, needs more. She was worried that her relationship with Yuu will be allowed to waste away, only to be eliminated in three years, just like the classroom. Kaylith had it right when they had this line as “In the past, she would always be there.”

According to Denshi Jisho, you have two translation choices when it comes to pokapoka. I say we’re well past the warm fuzzies at this stage.

Hyooo is the onomatopoeia for wind whistling. Also >Colormatching™.

I would have went with, “Cup noodles! Cup noodles!”

Swing and a miss. The only thing they had right was translating jigen into “dimension” and even that was a wrongheaded decision.

Other Observations

My guess is that Kotone is speaking directly to Shizuku (her name literally means “drip”?) which would require a certain pronoun to avoid having her sound like fucking Elmo.

( ´,_ゝ｀)ﾌﾟｯ It can’t be helped.

Effort signs.

Not-so-effort signs.

This wasn’t motion tracked for some reason.

“Lewd” should stay in 4chan and Reddit where it belongs.

This is what you get when you PgDn to the “Preview” chapter. Next time, time your chapters one frame back if you want people to see your typesetting.

Missed one.

Final Grade: B

I actually expected worse than what I watched (based on some random comments I saw), but I have to say this is a pretty good release. Probably not archive-worthy, but if you are looking for speedsubs to satisfy your yuri fix, you can definitely do worse.

I’m not trying to make excuses (except I am), but since Mezashite only has two people working on everything (which notably includes the OP and ED), episode ones will get less average effort per “thing” as we’ll have spent energy on the OP/ED/style choices that we would normally be spending on the script. I know that a lot of the lines you pointed out as bad (which really were bad, not arguing that) were lines that I wanted to change when I did my editing pass, but ended up not changing them because I wanted to get to bed already. The typos were caused by similar reasons, none of which would exist for episodes 2 and later.