Just a bit of disclosure, I have read the first 5 books twice, and the last two only one time each. I have seen the movies multiple times, though, the first three repeatedly due to my former job as a projectionist. In general, yes I am a Harry Pot-head.

Unfortunately, I haven't figured out how quite to Live Blog on this site, so I'm just gonna keep this open and update it whenever I write something new! I think that's what the kids call live blogging these days.

I don't know, I'm of the 1.0 generation.

Let's Begin!

WARNING - It may get a little blue. And spoilers, I guess, too.
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9:13 AM - Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone - Chapter 1
So far so good.

9:14 AM - 2 pages down. Where the fuck is this Potter kid? What's with all these damn hippies in the streets?

9:15 AM - Oh, right. He's a baby.

9:16 AM - Thanks to former college roommate Jay, who bought this book ten years ago because he wanted to read anything that schools were banning. And then forgot that I was the last person he loaned it to.

9:22 AM - One Chapter down! 30 some odd left.

9:28 AM - Man, Harry's aunt and uncle are dicks.

9:38 AM- Alright, Chapter 4 already!

9:44 AM - These are really short chapters. This book is super easy to read.

9:52 AM - Did the screenwriters just copy and paste the text for the first film? Or am I just glossing over nostalgia and cinematic memories?

9:55 AM - Inspired by my last question, I've decided to play the movie in the background. The rate I'm ripping through these chapters, I might be able to finish them both at the same time, although I doubt the scenes will match up.

10:01 AM - There are a lot of ads on this first DVD.

10:04 AM - Yeah, it's almost dead on. I know why they cut the things they cut, but I'll be damned.

10:05 AM - This was a bad idea. I've stopped reading. Like our nation's youth after the last Harry Potter book. (ZING!) Time to turn off the television.

10:09 AM - YAY! Harry got an Owl!

10:15 AM- These are awesome descriptions of this bizarre new world Harry Potter has entered.

10:22 AM - Already at Hogwarts! Let the fun begin!

10:28 AM - I wish Ithaca College was more like Hogwarts. Would have been a more wondrous and magical educational experience. Didn't even mean that pun!

10:35 AM - I should really look for a job instead of reading 7 books today. Probably be a smart move.

10:46 AM - Wow, taking a few moments away from reading to type is really kind of distracting. How did Mike Ryan do this with 6 movies?!? I guess it's easier with movies vs. print.

10:53 AM - Do I even have the other books? I'm pretty sure I have the last two, but I think my old roommate has the other ones. Son of a...

10:59 AM - This is a stupid idea. I have tons of other books I should read instead of re-reading something. There's Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, which I should get to before the movie gets made so I can say that the book was better.

11:22 AM - Handle ID, The Kid? Handle ID Goat? Handle ID Sarge? Not even disguising that this is a video game.

11:30 AM - WHOA! The female lead is Grimm's SISTER?!?! What a twist! Hopefully this movie passes the Bechdel test!

11:31 AM - Oh right. It doesn't.

11:34 AM - Nobody's splitting off into pairs. Smart. You don't want to mess with these things.

11:40 AM - "Does it bother you that you could have spent your life behind a microscope instead of a sniper scope?" "If they're so smart, how come they're so dead?" That's how you write fuckin dialog, Sorkin. Take a lesson, then eat a bowl of dick.

11:40 AM - Studio 60 my ass.

11:55 AM - The Kid is on drugs! How can he hunt for monsters on drugs?!? Unless it's a statement about how much more fun video games are when you're on drugs. This movie's got layers, people.

11:58 AM - Like an onion.

12:04 PM - Any movie that requires the use of a bone saw gets an extra half star.

12:09 PM - Is there a better modern day composer than Clint Mansell? His work here is hardcore, I need it to follow me around. Especially at the gym.

12:44 PM - First Person Shooter scene. Most innovative thing in cinema this past decade. Cameron didn't even TRY to replicate it with Delgo 2: The Quickening. So good, I have to share it. Thanks You Tube.

2 comments:

If I had a wish, my wish is that you could write shit like this for a living, so you wouldn't have to look for work, and I would always be thoroughly entertained after a hard day at my work. Of course, I wish I could make a living commenting about the shit you write for a living so that your shit would be my work.

Your shit would be my work! Why don't more sewage treatment plants have that for a motto? Wow, another line of work!

About Me

The Dude used to occasionally write reviews and brilliant think pieces for Moviesonlne.ca, in addition to writing screenplays that are so awesome, they'll melt your face off.
Also, he is an editing genius, so if y'all are hiring, give him a call.
Although living officially in Los Angeles proper, he hails from New Jersey, the greatest place on Earth.
And perhaps someday, he will stop calling himself The Dude. But today is not that day.