The 5 best places to have sex — an FHM guide

In a car

Pros: Sex in the car can take you back to a bygone era when your car was the coolest thing you could imagine. When you cruised around town in your Peugot 306, drum and bass up, windows down, you thought any minute a girl would beg you to ravish her in your sex wagon. Well now the dream has become a reality and you can live out your back seat fantasies.

Cons: Issues of space can be a literal pain in the arse. Nothing kills passion like gearstick proddage, so be careful. It’s not mega comfy, but the back seat is the place you’ll sustain the least bruises. The front seat can be fun, but jam packed with hazards, the horn being the biggest of these.