Largest conference of wounded vets

For Richard Silva, injured during 2004 in Fallujah, Iraq, the road to recovery has been long. Actually, he is still on it.

“I’ve had more downs than ups,” said Silva, 42 of Chula Vista, who still walks with a cane. He just received full disability status from the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs after a long paperwork ordeal.

It has also been a trek for his wife of 23 years, Carmen, and their 21-year-old daughter, Sarah, who is certain that she has “secondary post-traumatic stress disorder” from absorbing the shock of her father’s physical and mental wounds.

John Gastaldo/U-T San Diego/Zuma

Richard Silva, USMC Sgt. (ret.)who lives in Chula Vista with his family was injured in Fallujah, Iraq during battles to take the city. He is the only surviving member of his fire team.

Richard Silva, USMC Sgt. (ret.)who lives in Chula Vista with his family was injured in Fallujah, Iraq during battles to take the city. He is the only surviving member of his fire team. (John Gastaldo/U-T San Diego/Zuma)

“It’s come at great cost,” Richard Silva, a former infantryman, said Monday. He was diagnosed with PTSD, traumatic brain injury and severe survivor’s guilt after losing teammates from Camp Pendleton’s 3rd Battalion, 1st Marine Regiment.

“Lots of struggles. Lots of anger. Lots of impatience,” he said. “Financially. My marriage. For me to open up to my kids and admit I needed help.”

These are some of the uncomfortable topics on the agenda at this week’s Road to Recovery Conference in Coronado.

More than 50 injured veterans of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars are here for what may be the nation’s largest gathering for combat-wounded troops.

The annual conference is one of a growing number dedicated to bringing together wounded veterans and their loved ones from around the country, with the aim of creating meaningful group experiences.

In past years, the coalition’s family-oriented conferences were held in Orlando, which offered convenient access to Disney World. This year, for the eighth gathering, the targeted combination is San Diego and SeaWorld.

But on Monday, the focus was on topics of pain, loss and what helps keep a person going.

“It’s important that they have continued connectedness with their peer group,” said David Walker, chief executive of the coalition.

More than 2.2 million U.S. troops have served in the Iraq and Afghanistan wars, giving rise to a new generation of veterans who have survived roadside bombs, rocket-propelled grenades, ambush snipers and other weapons of destruction. Many of those men and women are now in their 30s, facing different life dynamics than when they first went to war up to 13 years ago.

“We’re serving a maturing population — a bit more stability,” Walker said. “They are here in a very serious way to improve their lives.”

The conference also has evolved to meet vets’ needs.

In recent years, for example, the coalition has added sessions on mental health in light of a 2008 RAND Corp. study estimating that about 300,000 young veterans have PTSD or major depression and that approximately 320,000 might have brain injuries.

Army veteran Shilo Harris addressed conference participants Monday, speaking about his road back from burns that took his ears, nose and a third of his skin.

Harris’ book, “Steel Will,” describes the 2007 Iraq bomb blast that upended his Humvee and his life. His recovery started with his first three post-surgery steps, after which he vomited and blacked out, he said with a chuckle.

“If there’s anyone here who thinks they can’t do it, they are wrong,” said Harris, a Texan who now makes a career as a motivational speaker.

In Silva’s case, his daughters were both preteens when he came home. They never got professional help with how their father’s war wounds jumbled up their own emotions.

Carmen Silva, his wife, knows the seriousness of this issue. Her father had returned from the Vietnam War and disappeared into alcoholism, leaving his family members to fend for themselves.

So the Silvas were pleased Monday to see the needs of younger children being discussed at the conference. “I’m so glad that my little brother has this. I think it would have been nice if they’d had this for my sister and I,” Sarah Silva said.

She did receive free university tuition because of her father’s injury and hoped to get a Navy commission. However, after being hit by a drunken driver six months ago, Sarah Silva is dealing with her own brain injury.

“That’s part of the reason we feel like we haven’t gotten a break,” Richard Silva said.

But some things are getting better for the family, 10 years into his journey of recovery.

He finally got his service injury upgraded to a 100 percent disability level, which will bring more monthly income to help with bills. He is pursuing a master’s degree from the University of Phoenix, and now the family is looking at opening a business.

Also, stay-at-home mom Carmen Silva recently was approved as her husband’s VA caregiver under a relatively new program that provides a stipend. The family wishes they’d known about that benefit earlier. The VA was directed to begin offering the monthly stipend in 2010.

“The hardest thing is knowing where to look for these programs,” Richard Silva said.

He added: “I was expecting a 100-yard dash, and this is a marathon. I didn’t bring the right equipment for this marathon. But going to these things, it feels like they are giving you the tools, the energy, the coaching you need to finish that marathon.”