I always feel a little unsure as a guest in someone else’s home. I want to be as polite as possible, and that can lead to some anxiety. Can I go through that door? Are those snacks for everyone? Where’s the bathroom? Here’s a trick that can help worrying guests like me.

A few weekends ago I went to a baby’s birthday party. I hardly knew anyone there, and I’d never been to the host’s house before. Fortunately, a few sticky notes around the house gave me pre-emptive answers to all of my inquiries.

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Photo: Patrick Allan

Should I knock on the door or use the doorbell? Oh, the party’s out back and I can go right in. Should I take my shoes off? Oh, no need. The screen door isn’t shutting right—did I break it?! Oh, it was already like that.

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Instead of pestering the host with questions they’ve already answered a thousand times, I could just read the notes and we could both go on enjoying the party. If you want guests to stay out of a room, make a note. If you want guests to help themselves to all of that beer in your fridge that people keep leaving behind, make a note. If you want guests to not freak out when your toilet makes a funny noise, make a note. If you want to give some stuff away for free, gather it all together, and make a note.

Photo: Patrick Allan

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Obviously, this approach can be taken to an unnecessary extreme, but it’s a handy way to keep guests informed and relaxed as long as you don’t go overboard. Next time you host a party, walk around your place as if you’d never been there before, and write a few notes that will make everyone feel welcome.