Deedee, I don't know if I said to necessarily cut them out. Take for instance me and my girl. We both have a friend of the OS sex that we have know since pretty much birth. I would never ask her to cut him out of her life and vice versa. However, if I became friendly with a female coworker and we were considered friends, I don't know any woman who I could date that would be cool with that. Having a business/work relationship that is reciprocally cordial and nice is one thing but I don't ever plan to hang out with a female coworker unless her signficant other is involved as well or it was in a group setting where I could ignore them.

Will they, won't they? We may be in for a tear-jerking final episode of Friends next Friday but the real irony of the show appears to be that men and women can't be platonic friends - backed up by the latest poll by leading women's website, handbag.com

This poll secured the vote of thousands of 25-44 year women, revealed that women are in denial and seem to want it their way when it comes to friendships and sex with men.

While most women (83%) believe they can be 'just good friends', nearly half (45%) admitted that their close male friends are ex-lovers.

What's more, two-thirds (59%) admitted they get jealous of their male friends' friendships with other women and have actively discouraged them from getting closer to a rival woman. In a classic case of the green-eyed monster, one in ten have even deliberately sabotaged their male friend's relationship with another woman - just like Rachel in Friends when Ross made a play for her sister Jill, and again at Ross's wedding to Emily.

A further 38% admitted they hate seeing their male friend get together with one of their girlfriends.

Far from being "friends", handbag's poll revealed that over a third of women (35%) secretly have feelings for their 'mate' but are too scared to tell him for fear of losing the friendship. This may be because women like to keep male friends as a marriage safety-net for the future: nearly half (47%) admit they have a platonic male friend on the "back burner" that they would consider marrying if they didn't find a husband by a certain age.

For those women who are unabashed when it comes to acting on their feelings, nearly a fifth admit to having an ongoing casual sexual relationship with a close male friend when they don't have another partner on the scene. Two-thirds of women say they don't regret sex with their male friends at all and generally get it on with their friends when they're feeling horny (49%) or when they've had an alcohol-fuelled evening (28%).

handbag.com's editor, Debbie Djordjevic says. "As far as male/female relationships go, men have called the shots from way back in history. It's nice to see modern women are finally in control of their sexual and emotional well-being. The point is that the goal posts in any relationship, including friendships can move at any time. Women no longer have to hide behind the label of 'platonic friends' and can learn to be open to whatever suits them best.' Note to editors

The poll was carried at handbag.com from 13/05/04 to 19/05/04. 1811 votes were cast. The full poll results are below:

1. Do you think men and women can be platonic friends? Yes 2074 83.33% No 415 16.67%

2. Have you ever had sex with a close male friend? Yes 980 39.37% No 1509 60.63%

3. If 'Yes', did you regret it? (If no go to Q5) Yes 375 34.06% No 726 65.94%

4. And if 'Yes', did sex destroy the friendship? Yes 238 34.34% No 455 65.66%

5. Do you have an on-going casual sexual relationship with a close male friend? (If no go to Q8) Yes 435 17.48% No 2054 82.52%

6. If 'Yes' what typically causes you to 'fall into bed' with him? Alcohol 132 28.39% When I'm feeling lonely and depressed 61 13.12% When I'm in between boyfriends 44 9.46% When I'm horny and want to have sex 228 49.03%

7. And if 'Yes', on average, how often do you 'fall into bed' with him? Once a week 93 20.26% Once a month 161 35.08% Once very 6 months 106 23.09% Once a year 40 8.71% Never 59 12.85%

This is taken from 'Handbag website', not a scienticially grounded source.It's a voluntary poll, this always skewes results, it's not a random sample.

And even if we would take these figures as facts, it just concludes that women have or have had sex with a close male friend.It does not discuss whether they had a relationship at that time. Further more, for the greatest part the women didn't have sex and think they can be platonic friends.

BTW it's a travesty that the times uses 'cosmo quality' research (and I mean that in a very bad way) and slaps on a hapdash conclusion...pagefiller material....

Why is it weird? It's great to be friends with someone of the opposite sex because you get to be someone totally different than you are with your same sex friends. Opposite sex friends often have a different way of looking at things which is interesting and intriguing. Plus, you get all kinds of insight into the mindset of the OS, which admittedly, can be frightening. The way it usually works is... you start out as friends, then eventually after a few months, he comes on to you, which is usually awkward, then you say no, I thought we were just friends, and then after more awkwardness, he either gets furious and frustrated and cuts the friendship... or you move on and stay friends. Those are usually the best friendships.

ps. Don't you like getting away from all the pwnings and gayer than convos occasionally and coming up here to talk to us?

Funny it's always been the other way with me, my girlfriends always end up wanting to be more than friends.