Life is a journey. Every single step leads to enlightenment.

Four days till 2013, I am counting down again. Actually it’s just 3 days 7 hrs to the ring of New Year, and as always it is time for me to look back. Quite a busy, productive year it’s been.

For the most parts of the year, I was overwhelmed with projects, interviews, job transitions, and tempted calls for moving to SFO, Austin, or even further, in New Zealand. I could not say enough thanks to previous positions that equipped me with the knowledge and skillsets that are now valuable, and in demand by many enterprises. As they always say, everything happens for a reason. I found myself working like crazy, there were 12-hr days. I exhausted previous position’s vacation days to work for projects, that took away my weekends, my personal and vacation time for the rest of the year; donated unused accrued sick days to a former coworker who was disabled from a tragic accident. Good thing is, I could not sacrifice too much of my personal time for all work, so I managed to keep my Flex schedule to have every other Friday off. I would go crazy for sure otherwise… Cousins were visiting from Berlin, Germany. The first time they visited us, mainly Mom, in the US after 20yrs. Younger brother was visiting home; and it was the first time I saw my lovely handsome nephew Nevan – he is a piece of everyone of us. I welcomed and adored my first niece Bella in May from younger sister, and look forward to welcoming second niece Noelle from brother this winter. Life is not perfect but kids deserve the best of life and love. I feel for parents who lost their innocent kids to the nonsense shooting in Newtown, Connecticut. I elected President Obama, this time with my full trust in his integrity and leadership, and hoped he was reelected by majority, knowing that it is Texas where my vote would not count much. I did not elect him (nor McCain) 4 years earlier. You can only tell whom to trust with time. He is a passionate but persevere people-person. It was unbelievable I lost my iphone at Home Depot. It had this suspicion of my iphone missing or stolen and it happened so soon… I should always trust my guts!!! I am checking off my 2012 to-do-list, and yes, the townhouse is rented out, the soffit/roof got fixed; I acquired another investment property just for income-tax deductible purpose. I am happy I am able to provide shelters to others who need and can appreciate. While renting the places out; I am OK with going home to Mom’s place after work/gym/mission trips…. I guess, I chose to spend more time with her; it’s always my intention for the past 10 yrs to be together with family. I think I tried too hard to lead that belief. Or better yet, I am still watching that to happen. Mom was thought to have a slight stroke one night – what happened was she woke up to go to the restroom but could not make it to the restroom and laid on the floor for hours till afternoon. I believe she had a vertigo/dizziness, and hope she wears the LifeAlert necklace that brother subscribed and ordered for her. However, I have to start checking upon her in the morning before leaving. Mom has water delivered monthly by Ozarka. The rainwater collection project is not done. I missed the rain-barrel sales event at the City, will get to that next year.

And finally, I deserve a big reward. After 6-month of online and stop-by/window shopping, I reward myself a new car. And really this babe is meant for me. After all, it is not the Wrangler that I had in mind last year. It’s a MB Coupe, for the sake of money worth-spent, I like it for its “Muscle, unbound; Aggressive in presence, athletic in shape (not too masculine), unleashed performance, and confident in motion; unrestrained style; unlimited engagement”.Shopping for car was quite a self-educating experience and I am proud of myself for being prepared. I am glad I also made new friends. At the same time the wish of dating men to be like shopping for car occurred to my mind. If dating men is like buying car, life would be easier – right car, right timing, right price, low miles, 1 yr/1 owner, edgy, with warranty, full options, and fun to drive… Fun but real though. 🙂

The Holidays will run out quickly. It is also time to reconnect with old friends. 2012 has come and gone in the blink of an eye as months, weeks and days whizzed by… and I was kept busy. The world is wired up with social media, networks, twitter, skype,… I am not totally wired up. I finally got caught up with some good movies that I missed. Roku XS box with video-streaming helps. A few personal projects – as there are as always for months to come. It is a world of craziness out there. And kindness is hard to find. I am looking forward to the much needed quiet time, and forward to 2013 another exciting year to come.

We are taught from the time we are born to conform. To conform to current and conventional views. We are discouraged from taking risks and encouraged to follow the proven path. In many ways we have been taught how to follow, rather than lead. We’ve been encouraged to look at the stars rather than reach for them. Yet inside each of us exists a unique and authentic light, a set of beliefs that, when followed, gives us a sense of purpose and ignites the human spirit within.

“WHEN WE FEARLESSLY FIGHT FOR WHAT WE BELIEVE IN AND REMAIN HOPELESSLY OPTIMISTIC ABOUT LIFE, LOVE AND THE FUTURE, WE CREATE AN AUTHENTIC CONNECTION WITH ALL IN OUR PATH. MOST IMPORTANTLY WITH OURSELF.”

I was asked if I am an alpha female type? I think I am more of a unique type, but is there such a thing as “alpha” or “beta” female/male? Then there are type A and type B personality…. So many that the psychologist made up. I don’t like being stereotyped. I just feel I don’t fit in any certain labeled group. I may carry certain traits of an “alpha female”, certain “beta”, and some “omega”, and anything in between.

So I looked up for what alpha female is made up of, by definition. Alpha can be bossy or dominant? That’s not necessary. I am nurturing, radiate warmth, cool and calm. I know what I want. It takes a right attitude and a balance act to be a right kind of alpha. The kind that is so comfortable with themselves that they don’t have to boss people around and don’t have to play mind-games or ego-trips to maintain their alpha status. Life experience may have developed certain common traits in women/men. I think it I can agree with some traits….

traits

Alpha females are intelligent , independent, and happy. They do not have their feathers ruffled to easy, they don’t slander others, and they are comfortable in their own skin. They attract the right type of people into their life, and are generally successful. An alpha female knows how to be confident, not cocky. She expresses what is on her mind, with grace. An alpha female is on the top of her game, and everyone else’s. It is hard to fool an alpha female.

She is someone that can handle herself in any given situation, and knows how to mix compassion into her life, without being weak. She is a true leader. A woman of her word. An alpha female will not break under pressure, and because of her psychological strength, she is often the one others go to for advice and support. She doesn’t talk in an awful manner about others. An alpha female is wise beyond her years. An alpha female is true to her friends, and true to herself.

She is well mannered,at peace with her life, and very independent. She has pride, and she is happy with herself.

If you know an alpha female, be glad you met her. Alpha females as friends are true. An alpha female has a bond that lasts in thick, and thin. An alpha female will never betray someone that is close to them. Alpha females are rare, strong, graceful ladies.

An alpha will excel in a business where she has total control, can flip the switch to turn it up or down when she wants, and has a small legion of devoted employees. Too many employees makes it possible for a coup. You know how alphas get! She’ll blossom where the limelight is on her and she can be seen as a star, if even for a night. Most of the businesses listed below will enhance or work with one of her stronger attributes. This is mostly for fun, but each business is fully capable of being run by someone else. It’s just that the alpha always brings a little more dazzle.

C-O-N-F-I-D-E-N-C-E

The test result says “I am an alpha female”. Interesting.

Are women and men necessarily as different as Venus and Mars? Not necessarily; I think I like the writing at http://blogs.tribune.com.pk/story/8168/alpha-male-beta-female-which-one-are-you/. In recent mass-market fiction, even Alpha heroes are required to develop modern-day Beta characteristics, like heightened sensitivity and emotions, thanks to the influence of the female heroine in the novel who ‘tames’ her man. But it isn’t always the case in the real world, such as in the case of a high powered modern woman who doesn’t need ‘rescuing.’ For her, Prince Charming may very well appear in the form of a relaxed Gamma, prepared to take the back seat or even be a stay-at-home dad in her castle.

As the world economy continues to boom, Leo, don’t be surprised if you’re surrounded by new work possibilities. More than one chance to increase your income could come your way today. The problem will be wading through all these opportunities and trying to decide which is the most appealing and workable for you. List your options and outline the pros and cons of each. Writing things down can sometimes make them clearer.

Indeed I am so overwhelmed… all of a sudden projects come from everywhere. I feel like everyone wants a piece of me… And the ongoing projects have deadlines. I am learning on the fly how to re-prioritize and extend the implementing process on the roadmaps here and there. And the call for moving to the Bay Area seems attractive. It is a tough decision to make. But I am counting blessings.

This past weekend while others mourned or watched Whitney Houston’s funeral, I mourned over the loss of Mikey – our lovely cat. Although he had been with us over 6 years short, it seemed he had been with us so long or all his life. He was moved from Seattle by his mom (my sister) and lived with us – been pet-sit by granny (our Mom), enjoyed the big house as his own world, while his mom can travel for work. He got struck by cancer which was found out so late, just 3 months ago. Remorsefully thinking, he could have lasted longer if I could spend days and nights with him the past 1 month. But we tried our best. Mikey stopped consuming any foods and barely drank. I could only feed him twice a day – morning and evening, tried to pump-feed him with CatSure milk, liquid, and meds and all that could help. About 10 days ago, gotten home after work and looked for him, I noticed his body started deteriorating, he lost a significantly huge volume of muscle. For some magical reason, he held it so strong until Sunday morning 02/19/2012, one day after his Mom finally got home. He was happy to see his Mom being home with him on Saturday night. He had her in his last moments – just like any child would ask for mom when crying in pain. I heard that human beings also do that … In their dead beds they always call for or think of their mothers, or loved ones(?). Just seeing an animal or anyone going away in suffering was so hard… Living in suffering is even harder.

We are not accepting the fact that Mikey is gone. He is still around here, as if someone waits patiently for us home by the window, sometimes sneaks behind me in the closet while I subconsciously watch out not to step on or run into him…

He left us a valuable lesson – pets are the only ones who can bring you happiness and that is all they bring – happiness only, but they can only stay with you that long. I read from someone’s one blog that her cat was with her for 19 years. That must be some well-cared for healthy cat. We love them always. Love Mikey always.

Although we can not avoid the natural law – if there is birth, there is death. Life on this earth is a four-stage line of “birth – aging – sickness – death”.

Having seen what happened to senior(s) at dead-beds had me thinking many times of how we all should live in order to die without suffering. We can eliminate the ‘sickness’ part. Advanced science and technologies have made it possible for extending human life expectancy. At the same time, it is not too late to adopt a healthy lifestyle, to be aware of the air we breathe in, the water we drink, and the foods we consume.

Growing up, I learn we all have ups and downs of life. It is the natural law. The ocean is not always calm. When it comes to how frequent and how extensive, or how they (the ups and downs) affect one person’s life versus others’, there are many factors involved – we are all different, born on different date/time, have different up-bringings, different levels of dignity and sub-consciousness, good/bad deeds, and wisdom. It all boils down to ‘karma’. And of course ‘karma’ is all about what you harvest after you have sown. Let’s see what this year will bring me – I am embracing.

If I am an “earth or soil” and my luck element is “water” and based on this website : 2012 is the Water Dragon year. Dragon contains Earth. People whose Earth score is low will receive benefits from Dragon. Dragon also contains Water. 2012 will bring good luck for people whose Lucky Element is Water.
Earth implies steadiness or stillness. Earth people minds are kind of inflexible. They always have the basic instinct to keep their promise.

The following is your birth chart. The first character in DAY represents you. So you are equivalent to Soil.

Hour (kids)

Day (you)

Month (parents)

Year (ancestor)

Female Fire

Female Soil

Female Metal

Female Soil

Red Rabbit

Brown Chicken

White Sheep

Brown Chicken

Your birth chart was generated using the Chinese Stem-Branch Calendar system. The Stems, upper row in the chart, are Five Elements which are Metal, Water, Wood, Fire and Earth. The Branches, lower row in the chart, are 12 animal names which are related to Five Elements. The following Five Elements distribution chart is produced from your birth chart.

Five elements

Soil (you)

Metal (kids)

Water (money)

Wood (job)

Fire (mom)

Total

176

180

0

24

59

Here we select an element from the Five Element chart as your Lucky Element. The Chinese Yin-Yang Five Elements describe the BALANCE. When the Five Elements are balanced, they are in harmony and you will be lucky. When they are out of balance, they are in conflict and cause you trouble. So your lucky elements are the ones that bring the Five Elements into balance. Usually the lucky elements are the ones with a lesser weight (score). Here we want to pick Water as your lucky element, because your Five Elements have a better shape when the weight of Water increases.

Lucky Element

How good is my luck in 2012?

Water

It’s very good, 2012 is a strong Water year. There is nothing can stop the luck coming to you. You can feel it and people can see good luck over you all the time.

Day Master Type

What will happen in 2012?

Water

Water represents your friends, siblings or same generation relatives. The 2012 events will connected to them and spend most of time with them. You will have more energy in social activities. If Water is your Lucky Element, then you will get lots of courage and support from your siblings or friends. If you are doing business, then your friends or business partners will help you to bring in more income. If Water is your Unlucky Element, then your friends or relatives will bring you trouble. They might ask for a loan, or you may be forced to spend money on them.The major element of Dragon is Earth. Water is afraid of Earth. Earth brings pressure on Water. So Earth represents law, career, boss or position. If you have a lot of Water in the birth chart, then Dragon will bring a job opportunity. If you waste money in spending, Dragon will give you advice on how to save money. If someone wants to borrow money from you, then sometimes Dragon will help you to say no. If you have a little Water in the birth chart, your friends and siblings will fully support you when you face trouble in career, argument or lawsuit.In general, 2012 will be a very good year for people whose Water element score is low. The high score Water people need a conservative attitude in the Water Dragon year.

2012 is Male Water Dragon year . If your birth chart contains Female Fire , then your social relationship with people will be good. If Female Fire is your Day Master and you are a female, then it’s possible that a love relationship, engagement or marriage will come to you in 2012.

Chicken and Dragon have a Branch Attraction Relationship into Metal. If Chicken is in your birth chart, then your people relationship will be good. If Metal is also your lucky element, then you will do well in social activities. Chicken is also the Romantic Star of Dragon. If you are looking for love, then you will have a very good opportunity to find someone you like. If you already have a lover, then we will have a closer relationship. If Chicken is in the Day Column of the birth chart, then you might think about marriage in 2012.Hmmm???? Career-wise, I can see that I have more work. It’s all my choice, and any choice has a cost. Money comes, money goes. Luck comes and goes. Again, the 80/20 rule applies here.

Hour

Day [ You ]

Month

Year

Male Fire

Female Earth

Female Metal

Female Earth

Red Tiger

Brown Chicken

White Sheep

Brown Chicken

The upper character in DAY column represents the person. So you are equivalent to Female Earth. The symbols in the upper row of birth chart are called Heavenly Stems. The animals in the lower row in are called Earthly Branches.