Monday, October 4, 2010

With more ZOMBIES approaching, the FIRE getting closer, the IMPS dealt with, the QUEEN rescued, and all other immediate concerns completed, you decide it's time to ROLL OUT with your POSSE. The QUEEN lowers the BARRIER to the EAST and you carry MISS WHALE CHICK and her new friend, MOUSE DUDE. PAD and the QUEEN LADY follow down the CORRIDOR.

MONOCLE PIPE is still MELTING DOWN on the TABLE.... He doesn't look good at all. And that... doesn't look like blood.... Pfft, whatever. He said he was totally safe. Loser.

Through the DOORWAY, the QUEEN LADY raises the BARRIER back into place behind the lot of you, barring out the ZOMBIES and FIRE. And SINGING DISHWARE.

QL: You know, Wizard, now that I have a moment to think, I don't believe you ever told me your name.

CAD: Huh? Guess not.

QL: My name is Queen Jillian of the North Kingdom. Your friend... Alan, was it? He called you Cad. That's not short for something is it?

CAD: Yeah, it is.

QL: Ah, Cadungery, then? Named after another great hero of the realm?

CAD: What are you talking about?

QL: . . . . What is your full name, Cad?

CAD: Cadungery Muffinbottom III. So who's this hero dude?

QL: . . .

CAD: What's up?

QL: His name... the hero... his name was... the Great Sir Cadungery Muffinbottom III, the greatest time-traveling hero the world has ever seen! He prophesied that he would return in our time of greatest need and rid the world of it's greatest evil as one of a company of the four greatest heroes of all time!

CAD: That kind of sounds like me, I guess.

QL: The heroes... of whom he said he was totally the coolest, much cooler than the others, especially some man named Rhys O'Callahan, who was totally not as cool as Cadungery, not in any way, and who's girlfriend was totally in love with Cad, since he was so much better than Rhys, but she stuck with Rhys in order to keep him from crying all the time like the little baby he was.

CAD: OK, yeah, that sounds like me. I guess I'm the world's greatest hero. I kinda wonder how that crybaby is doing, though. Probably crying....

Ditto what Shar said. And either the peanut shop is under attack by the MOTHER OF ALL SANDWORMS (including the one laying dead near the shop), or the Mule Kick (R) team has Rhys in the transport and under observation.

Y'know, I don't think I'm gonna feel Cad's safe unless I get to see MP as a pile of bloody ash. Even Cad doesn't deserve the scourge of a zombified, voodoo-undead, knife-possessed, gamer candaemon intent on vengeance for self and friend stalking his Muffinbottom.

...though, it would be kinda cool if MP, having been killed by an incredible feat of statistical defiance perpetrated by Cad, became some sort of summonable in Cad's heretofore undocumented magical arsenal.