'I didn't know what it was like to be an individual'

Violet and Rose are identical twins. They have only fallen out once in their long lives - and that was when Violet became a Jehovah's Witness. On the eve of their 100th birthday, Joanna Moorhead asks them, and others, what it's like when you're one of a pair

At first sight you wouldn't realise Violet and Rose are identical; but look a little closer, beyond the fact that Rose is now slightly stooped and a bit more rounded, and that Violet wears glasses, and you will see the similarities. They don't meet up that often these days - Violet lives alone in London, while Rose lives in Kent with her son David - but when they do, they greet one another with genuine joy. And, says Rose, if either of them was in any difficulty, there's no question that the other would be there for them. "Violet fell over a few years ago and I went to look after her," says Rose. "Even though we're older, we'd always get to the other one's side if needed."

As children, Rose and Violet were always dressed identically - their mother, says Rose, loved making their outfits. "People called us the two princesses," she remembers. Sadly, their mother died when they were just 12: Violet remembers how she asked the doctor how much time she had left so she could make sure she had made them winter clothes before she died.

Rose married first, at the age of 21, but even that change in their circumstances didn't divide the two women; Rose and her husband, Bob, lived with Bob's parents, and Violet moved in too, which seemed perfectly natural to everyone. She stayed until she got married, at the age of 30.

There have been times when it was more of a challenge to stay in close touch. During the second world war, for example, they weren't able to meet up as often as they would have liked, but once the war was over, they started to get together regularly with their children. "We'd take them to the park and so on," says Rose.

The only thing that has put any kind of division between the two, through the decades, has been the fact that Violet became, many years ago, a Jehovah's Witness. But, says Rose, it was never exactly what you would call a rift. "We understand one another, so she knows I'm not a Jehovah's Witness and there's no point trying to make me one," says Rose.

For many years, the two had a week's holiday once a year with Violet's son, Tony. These days, meetings tend to be for special occasions - such as this coming weekend, when there's a big celebration planned for their birthday. There will be a letter to each from the Queen: and it isn't often she's been asked to congratulate twins on reaching a century of life.

Veda Goodison and Edna Artrey, 59

Veda and Edna were born in Jamaica, where they lived until coming to England at the age of 15. But what was unusual about their childhood was that they weren't raised together. "I was very weak when I was born," says Edna. "I wasn't expected to live, so to help my mother out, my aunt and grandmother said they would look after Veda, just for a few weeks, until the crisis over my health passed." But, somehow, a few weeks led to a few months, and then to years and although Veda and Edna met frequently, and were in the same class at school, it wasn't until they were 13 that they lived together under the same roof.

Despite living apart, though, they were always aware of the bond between them. "We were part of a family of 11, so we had lots of other siblings," says Edna. "But I always knew Veda was my special sister."

"Being a twin is almost like having an extension of yourself," says Veda. "When you're not together, you feel incomplete. Last week Edna was on holiday, and part of me was always aware that she wasn't nearby, that she was further away from me than usual."

Since growing up, the women have remained close. "There are secrets, experiences, anxieties I've shared with Edna that I've never shared with anyone else. There's never been any rivalry between us: we genuinely want what's best for one another. It's a real joy of being a twin, to have someone like that in your life," says Veda.

Probably the only downside, says Edna, was that she and Veda were constantly compared with one another at school. "Veda was the clever one, and I was always being asked, 'why can't you do that like your sister?' It isn't helpful."

To this day, she says, there's a closeness in communication that's not replicated in any other relationship. "If we're at a party or a concert, and we're across the room from one another, we can look at each other and, just from our eyes, we'll each know exactly what the other one is thinking," says Edna. "It doesn't work with other sisters. It's something about being a twin."

James and Richard Ashley-Smith, 21

Until they started at university, identical twins James and Richard had rarely been apart. "We did have very similar lives up to that point," says James. "We did the same subjects at A-level and got very similar grades. All our GCSE options were the same with one exception. We were at boarding school together and we've always hung out together, without ever needing to put any space between us.

"When it came to university, though, we decided the time had come to find our separate identities. I chose Bristol, where I'm doing mechanical engineering; Richard is at Southampton doing electromechanical engineering. Before that, we'd always been a job lot: if we're walking along together and someone passes by, they will say 'Hi' and mean both of us. And people call us 'the twins' or 'the Ashleys', and if someone says 'Richard', I'll turn my head and Richard does the same if someone says 'James'."

So making friends who only knew them as individuals was a revelation. "For the first time in my life there were people who only knew me and had never heard of James," says Richard. "It was an extraordinary feeling. Until then, I didn't know what it was like to be a complete individual." Both men say that there have been more advantages than disadvantages to being a twin. "Having another person who will be there for you and who understands you and who you can always turn to ... that's quite something," says Richard.

They did miss one another in the early weeks at university. "Thank goodness for mobiles," says James. "We could always talk, and if one of us was going through a rough patch, the other one would get over to be there."

They've always been best friends, and doubt it could ever be otherwise. "People realise they can never be as close to you as your identical twin, so they don't try," says Richard. One thing both knew would change their relationship was when serious girlfriends came along - and Richard's partner of a year has changed things, James says. "There have been times when Richard has gone off with her somewhere and he would have been with me. It's not exactly that I feel left out, but it's definitely different. It's a new chapter."

Harry and Kate Wilkinson, 12

Harry and Kate are in their first year at secondary school: it's a significant time for them as twins, because until now they've always been in the same class. "At primary school there was only one class in each year, so they couldn't split us up," says Kate. "Now there are lots of classes, so we're in different ones. It did seem strange at first, but we're at the age when we need more independence from one another."

They've always been very close, says Kate: until a few months ago they shared a bedroom. "But now we've got our own rooms for the first time. I like it, because Harry had all this boy stuff and it was always piled up on his side of the room, and I had all my girl stuff on the other."

In their early years, she says, they tended to share the same friends. "But as we got older I started to play with girls, and he started to play with boys. And it was funny for us, because I always had more contact with boys than my friends because of Harry. Having a boy twin means I understand boys of our age better than other girls I know, and I think Harry understands girls better than his friends do."

Both Kate and Harry say they are more in tune with one another than with their younger brother, Freddie, who's seven. "Since Kate and I are exactly the same age, we tend to be on the same wavelength," says Harry. There are times, says Kate, when they find themselves thinking exactly the same things at exactly the same moment. "We've been in a situation where one of us has said something and the other one has said, 'Hey, I was thinking exactly the same thing.' It's funny."

Harry says he'd always stand up for Kate, and she would for him. "There was one time, in primary school, when she was left out of a group. She was really upset about it, I could tell. So I went up to her and said, it's OK, lots of people really like you. I wanted to make things better for her."

· On Monday, World Twin Day, the Twin Research Unit (www.twinsuk.ac.uk) at St Thomas's hospital in London is hoping to host the largest ever gathering of twins, both identical and non-identical same-sex sets, over the age of 16. Please email twinrecruitment@gstt.nhs.uk or call 020-7188 5555