Famous Last Meals of Mafia Dons, Kingpins, Capos and Hitmen*
*Other Tips On Being a Mafioso with Fractured Facts About the Mob

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

LEAVE THE GUN

LEAVE THE GUN

In the movie "The Godfather" Don Corleone's
trusted caporegime "Fat" Peter Clemenza cemented his place in mob
cinema history when he gave hitman Rocco Lampone, the sage advice "Leave
the gun, take the cannoli." Not in the original script, late actor Richard
Castellano improvised the now oft quoted legendary line. Tipping the scales at
a deuce plus, the Sicilian bulldog looked like he had eaten more than his
lion's share of those crispy sweet cream filled tubes.http://youtu.be/yHzh0PvMWTI

SICILIAN CANNOLI

One would hate to think what would have been the fate of
hitman Rocco had he taken the gun and left the cannoli on the seat next
to that dead strunz, Paulie Gatto. That Bronx bum soldato, who nearly got Don
Corleone assassinated, defected to Virgil "The Turk" Sollozzo. He
deserved the three slugs Lampone put into his head. Had Rocco gotten confused in the heat of the moment and left the cannoli, he might've wound up like his paisan Luca Brasi sleeping with the fishes at the bottom of the East River.

If you grew up Sicilian, you're born with the cannoli gene.

Thanksgiving and Christmas are the two big holidays that are synonymous with cannoli - wouldn't be complete without platters of Italian pastry and cookies. There was only one place to get the best: Veniero's Bakery on East 11th Street in NYC's east village. Thanksgivings my dad and I would leave the house early, get on the Northern Parkway to the Midtown Tunnel then shoot straight down Second Ave. If
it was early enough we'd make it in about 40 minutes. By 9 the line was all the way up the block and around the corner no matter how early or how cold. It could be zero with a wind chill factor of -20, but if you tasted these cannoli, you'd gladly freeze your
ass off.
Same ritual to get into Radio City for the Christmas pageant where
Michael and Kay were when Don Corleone was gunned down. That was always at
least a two-hour wait to watch the precision kick line of the Rockettes, a movie and the nativity scene with real camels and donkeys on stage!

Standing in the bakery line wasn't that bad if you pre-ordered
as my mother was always smart enough to do. There were a couple of other pastries besides the cannoli worth waiting for...pastaciotti, flakey sfogliatelle, but cannoli was and still is king. Baklava, eclairs and linzer tortes, none can compare. With an espresso/cappuccinno, it's a life-changing cultural and culinary experience. Then there's only one cookie that takes the cake; pignoli, Italian macaroons. Sorry Manischewitz, your wimpy, sticky, coconutty approved-for-Passover, blessed-by-a rabbi parve version just doesn't cut it once you've taken a bite into a pignoli made with almond paste and topped with toasted pine nuts. Follow this canolli recipe from an
authentic Sicilian bakery brought back from Palermo where they originated as a symbol of fertility. Once your gumad gets a taste, she'll greet you every time with, "Is that a cannoli in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?" You'll have your guests dropping their guns, dancing the tarantella and begging for seconds! A capisce?

SCORZE (shell)

1-1/4 cup flour

2 tablespoons lard (live dangerously except

if you live in NYC where trans fats are now banned.

You can substitute new Crisco w/o breaking the law,

or start a new business bootlegging Crisco)but don't

expect the same flavor.)

1/4 cup granulated sugar

Red wine (Moscato or Marsala are best)

Squirt of lemon

Salt to taste

Sift flour, sugar and salt into a bowl.

Add lard, lemon and gradually enough wine to

make a soft dough. Wrap dough in a cloth and

let rest in fridge, best overnight. When ready

to use roll into a very thin sheet and cut

into 3” squares. Lay a metal tube** (gun barrel

can be substituted or 4-1/2 lengths of iron piping,

the kind used for a turban*)diagonally on each square

and bring 2 corners together, wetting and pressing to

seal. Deep fry (screw the free radicals!) the pastry

with the tube in hot oil until golden. When cool,

remove the tube and let cool completely.

Save in air tight container in a cool place till ready to

be filled.

RIPIENO (filling)

1/2 lb.ricotta cheese

3/4 cup confectioner’s sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla*** (the

real extract, not vanilla flavoring

if you don’t wanna a visit from Rocco

Put ricotta and sugar through a strainer

(sieve) 2x and add vanilla.

Fill the scorze when ready

to serve. If you fill before,

the cream will soften the shell

pistachio nuts. Some like to mix in citronella or chocolate chips with the
cream mixture or substitute mascarpone for ricotta. Plate and dust each cannoli lightly with powdered sugar.

If you wanna gain favor with the Don, serve with espresso

(don't be a jabone and call it expresso). Add a shot of
anisettawith a twist of lemon peel and you'll understand why cannoli were the perfect Sicilian fertility food!

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About Me

Witty ex NYer with Sicilian roots and east coast sensibilities still intact. I love & miss NY pizza, a crispy cannoli bursting with filling w/choco chips please, no citronella! Pair it with a latte and I'm in heaven.