Which means you can't have one, but Conan O'Brien can. Because Conan has connections, while you merely have conniptions.

Conan, though, is a modest sort. He didn't want you to know. Until, that is, a pesky viewer with the handle "4893McLovin" insisted that he merely had some sort of awful, black plastic-backed iPhone 3G or 3GS.

McLovin's evidence was based on Conan's recent exposition of what happens when you download iOS 7.

Can't find the golden iPhone? Don't worry. Raffi can get you a deal, at least if you're willing to go along with a sketch aired Wednesday night on Conan O'Brien's late-night talk show.

Fans of Coco first met iPhone salesman Raffi Jaharian a couple of weeks ago after Apple launched its two new iPhones. Sporting gold chains and gold rings and touting gold as "best, best, best," Raffi claimed that he was the man behind the gold iPhone.