Three Reasons Sherlock Holmes Is Probally an Alien

Note: I wrote this article in August 2012 and the Sparkitors published it, but I decided to copy and paste it to the new Sparkler Post section. And yes, there was a picture with the origonal post. I just couldn't find one on my own.
Over the course of the summer, I’ve become a fan of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. In the past six weeks, I’ve already read 22 of the 56 short stories and all four novels, and I’ve deduced that Holmes must have at least some extra terrestrial DNA. I have nothing against beings from outer space, but I can’t help but wonder if the consulting detective of 221b Baker Street is one. I know it sounds like I’ve just read too much Bradbury or seen too many science fiction shows, but I have my proof! It’s not because of his sharp observation skills and deductive reasoning, which are both within the realm of human possibility, but because of other characteristics and habits I have observed.
Reason One: He never sleeps. According to Watson, Holmes often stays up all night conducting chemical experiments or thinking of a solution to a case. Watson never says that he has ever seen Holmes asleep. What proof is there that he ever does? Holmes himself even admits in The Sign of the Four that he feels energized by work but becomes worn out from rest. To me, that doesn’t sound very human.
Reason Two: He can last on little food for a long period of time. In "The Adventure of the Norwood Builder", Watson informs the reader that Holmes often allows himself little to no food when he is working on a difficult case. For example, in "The Five Orange Pips", Holmes comes home late at night, gobbles down a piece of bread, downs a glass of water, and admits that, until he got home, he hadn’t even thought of food since breakfast. Although the human body can survive for a fair number of days without food and water, it doesn’t last long with reminding us that we need more fuel. If I skip even one meal, I begin to feel nauseous and develop a headache. How can any human last all day without at least thinking of food, even if he or she is trying to solve a crime involving the Ku Klux Klan?
Reason Three: His body doesn’t react to the drugs he takes like it’s supposed to. After Holmes takes cocaine injections, he’s quiet, distant, and appears to have little energy. According to this article, however, effects of cocaine “include increased energy, reduced fatigue, and mental alertness.” Holmes appears to suffer the opposite side effects. The only exception is mental alertness; in The Sign of the Four, Holmes tells Watson, “I suppose that its influence is physically a bad one. I find it, however . . . stimulating and clarifying to the mind.” Sherlockian theorists have come up with many explanations, such the possibility of the drug being morphine and not actually cocaine, but mine is that he’s an alien.
Maybe you think I’m crazy, maybe you got a laugh out of it, or maybe both. Is it only a strong possibility and not a confirmed fact? Yes. Is it far-fetched? Maybe, but gravity was once considered a far-fetched idea. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go see if the library book I have can be found on Amazon for a good price. JMK signing off!