Today we bring you "Playing With A Purpose" which is a video series made by Kirby Worthington and her colleagues. In this series you will be able to learn a variety of educational toys that are homemade and free as they come from recyclable materials. Enjoy and stay tuned for more to come!

When teaching the math principle called “one-to-one correspondence”, it is important to involve physical development, fine motor skills, gross motor skills, and making it something they delight in – all at the same time! Then they will get it much faster.

Count while Eating

They can count each cheerio, or each green bean. Before they realize it, they are understanding subtraction! It gets the brain wired for math as a toddler. They may not know it, of course; but one day it will click.

Tick Tock Game

Also mentioned in our previous post on math, this game can be used to teach one-to-one correspondence. It involves the body and balance. When they say the number, lift a finger and have them jump. As a rule, only go as high as they are old (until the age of 5).

Counting Steps

Also, again, count when going up steps. Always go in order. Every time you go up steps, no matter where you are, count them. This actually teaches all three principles: stable order, one-to-one correspondence, and cardinal.

Once they have gotten all principles – the foundations of math – then you can play with it more. Tape numbers on the stairs, starting with 1 on the first step at the bottom. For instance, go up three and take the taped number (3) off the step. Then say, “What is 3 take away 1?” looking down to step number 2. This is a way of getting math into their very muscles.

The Coffee Can

Take a coffee can. (Be careful it’s one with a lip and thin edge at the top – otherwise some may be sharp.) Begin with infants dropping things in one object at a time. Say “In” each time it goes in. Say “Out” each time an object comes out. If the child is doing it themselves, the infant body is learning one-to-one correspondence.

When they are older, you can use clothes pins without springs. For any “oral” (3-4 or under) child, cut a 1 to 1 ½ inch hole in the top so that only one clothes pin can fit in at a time. Drop the clothes pin in, counting each time one enters.

As they get still older, change the game by making the opening in the lid a slit rather than a hole. The ends of frozen juice containers (washed, of course!) can be pushed through. Or if a can opener leaves a smooth edge on the can top that it cuts off (so that it is safe for a kid to handle), this can be pushed through the slit as well. This can be used in the same way as the clothes pins, but by using these objects their finger muscles will be strengthened.

Finally, with older kids, take two stickers that look the same and put them on two lids. And two more, making another pair of lids, and so on. Then the child can find a matching pair before putting them in the coffee can.

A Few More Ideas

Here is another tool to have in your “tool kit”: When going somewhere that you know they’ll be reluctant to leave, ask them to choose one activity to end with and have a count down. For instance, if you are at a park, it may be swings to end with. If the child understands the “stable order principle” (principle #1) well enough, you can count down pushes on the swings. The numbers correspond in a one-to-one manner with the pushes.

Another idea is to pick a number and have a number for the day. Do things that day in that amount. For instance, if the number of the day is 3, the child might eat 3 beans, and then have 3 more. He might wear 3 socks! Or swing 3 times. Or jump 3 times. (You get the picture.) By the end of the day, they will have the idea engrained – usually. The idea is to reinforce just one number all day long.

Seriation is putting things in size order, either big-to-small or small-to-big. Children need to learn this concept of looking at something and picking out which item is bigger or smaller. Be sure to go in the same order each time. (Always from bigger to smaller or the other way, but don’t go back and forth. Keep it clear for them.) When teaching seriation, it’s best to use all the same color items. When teaching size or quantity, lots of color can confuse the children as to exactly what you are comparing. If the items being compared are all the same color, the child is clear it is size that is being differentiated.

To prepare for the two steps in teaching seriation, you will need a big square and a little square. You can use a brightly colored cardboard box. (You may be able to get some free from a grocery store.) Cut out a big square and a little square.

The First Step in Teaching Seriation

Use the Montessori three-step method. You will need the big square and the little square (mentioned above).

The adult holds up the big square and says, “Big.”

The adult holds up the little square and says, “Little.” Put both down. Point to the big square and name it again (“Big”), then point to the little square and name it again (“Little”). (If you start with naming the big square, always start with the big. Stay in that order.)

The adult points to the big square and asks, “What do you call this?” The child names it (“Big”). Then the adult points to the little square and asks, “What do you call this?” The child names it (“Little”). As long as the child is grasping the concept of big/little, it is fine to call the object by name (for example, “square”) as well.

The Second Step in Teaching Seriation

Add another square. Then the names become: “Big”, “Smaller”, “Smallest”. The adult may use different voices. This makes it fun and also helps the child remember the new concept. Thereafter a fourth, fifth, and sixth size can be added – as long as the child is able to tell the differences between what is bigger and smaller.

There are store-bought toys that teach this concept as well, for example: nesting cups. But it is important to remember to always start with two objects.

To wrap up the game, count how many squares there are at the end.

Another Seriation Game

Use jars and lids. Take a big jar lid (for example, from a peanut butter jar) and a little jar lid. Mix up the lids. Ask, “Which is the little lid?” When they find it, they can put it on the little jar. Then ask, “Which is the big lid?” Put it on the big jar. If they seem to understand, add more jars/lids of different sizes. Eventually you can have a basket full of jars and lids as a game to try to find matches.

This game works on the concepts of amount and seriation. It also works physical development such as turning the wrist and hand – which comes in handy in many sports later on.

Interestingly – and this is important to remember – preschoolers cannot do tall-and-skinny vs. short-and-fat, but they can do tall-and-fat vs. short-and-skinny. This is because “tall” and “fat” are both categories of bigger and “short” and “skinny” are both categoriesof smaller. To put a bigger description (like “tall”) with a smaller description (like “skinny”) will confuse preschoolers as to what exactly they are learning.

If a child is not understand math, you can play games to get the brain ready for math. If you need to start over with the basics again with an older child, just be aware of using materials that won’t belittle a child (sand, clay). The object is to get the information into the brain through auditory, tactile, and other methods. If the “highways” aren’t working, use “back roads”- it still gets you there!

Three Principles for Getting the Brain Ready for Math

Stable Order Principle – When you’re counting, the numbers have to be said in a fixed order: “One, two, three, four, etc.” Not “Three, five, two, seven…” Preschoolers often don’t have this concept yet.

One-to-One Correspondence – Each item you’re counting gets a number and only one number. You can practice this when going up stairs. Children may at first use many numbers per step. Have them step on one step when saying each number.

Cardinal Principle – When counting, the last number you count represents the total amount.

There are lots of ways to teach these various things that we will mention in the next few blog posts, but we’ll start with the first principle.

Stable Order Principle

Some children respond well to counting songs; for instance, “Tick Tock”. You can hold them up and rock them side to side or from foot to foot as you sing: "Tick tock, tick tock, I'm a little coo-coo clock." This works on their balance as well as getting the body involved in learning to count in order. Hold up one finger and jump on time saying, “Coo-coo”. You can play this game over and over, going up as far as they have patience.

Another way of teaching this principle is to make a page of numbers. Pick up items that look interesting (don’t play this game with a child who still puts things in their mouth, so probably older than age 3) like buttons, beans, cut up straw, acorn hats, etc. You can choose items with different colors and shapes and feels too. Then, you write out clear numbers on the left side of a piece of paper, starting with 1 at the top and going down to 10. Next to the clearly written numbers, glue the correct number of an item in a row beside the numbers (e.g. 4 acorn hats next to the number 4). (Older children can actually help make this. And it can be spread over a couple of days based on whether they’re still having fun.) This promotes seeing, feeling, and hearing the numbers in order. It helps recognize numbers and the quantity that goes with each number. The child can see how the amount grows. You can talk about “bigger” and “smaller”, “more” and “less”, etc. teaching math-size vocabulary.

Counting Worm Take the bottom of an egg carton. Cut it in half long-ways. Turn it upside down so that it looks like it has six humps. Make one side a strip of six with a face at one end. Write in order the numbers on each “hump”. Then take the other strip and cut each cup/hump out individually. Put the number of dots on the top of those, from 1 to 6, to correspond with the worm’s humps. Those individual pieces will be his “clothes”. Have the child try to find and match the dots (on the clothes) to the corresponding number (on the humps).

Most teaching of young children works better if there is a funny story to go with it. So you can make a story to go with the counting worm. Such as: He’s getting ready to go to school. He needs to get dressed. Where’s his hat? (Point to the number 1 and to the one-dot.) The whole time you are telling the story, you point to the numbers in order. They find the dots in order. When he is fully dressed, take the counting worm and start to go to school. Then flip him over saying, “The wind blew his clothes away!” This provides another opportunity to dress him again. Then stop after the second round. Always stop while they’re having fun. (If it is hard for them to put it away, just be sure not to promise something you cannot follow through on. For instance, avoid saying an exact time for when you’ll play it later. Just say in general, “We’ll play it later.”)

Stage 1: When teaching a child to blow through a straw, have them put it in their mouth and hold their hand at the other end so that they can feel the air come through the straw when they blow out (instead of sucking in).

Stage 2: Since children are more accustomed to sucking in than blowing out, use water in a glass to show the difference. Place the straw in the water and have the child blow bubbles in the water to practice blowing out.

Stage 3: Once accustomed to blowing out, try making bubbles with soap. Put a little dish soap in water and blow with the straw. It is recommended that you do this in the bathtub, in the kitchen with a towel on the floor, or outside. This should make a lot of bubbles!

Stage 4: Now we get to the bubble art. Add tempura paint (not a lot is needed, just enough to color the bubbles) to the soapy water. Blow the colored bubbles onto a piece of paper (use scrap paper if this is an experiential activity and recycle at the end).

As the child learns to blow the bubbles up into the air, they can touch the paper to the bubbles mid-air. Different colors could be added though it is recommended that you let each color dry before adding a new one. Older children can do bubble art on stationary to give as gifts, just be mindful of too much paint or dark colors if the page is going to be written on later.

Shaving Cream Fun

To make this activity as easy as possible for clean-up, set up on a table that can safely handle wet things and/or on a pan/tray/plastic placemat. Place a blob of shaving cream in front of the child. If it is their first time doing this, spread it out smoothly for them and they can start finger painting in it. This can also be a learning activity using letters, numbers, pictures, etc. For many children, the feeling is a fun sensation. This is also a great activity to do before dinner because when finished they can go in and wash-up for dinner AND it’s so fun that it stretches them through the hangry time before eating.

Shape Pictures

In preparation, cut different shapes out of colored cardboard (can be from any source). Use these different colors and designs to lay out an assortment on a tray from which to choose for the child. These can be used to make a picture. Big shapes can be used on the living room floor.

Sand Art

It’s helpful to put down a sheet/old shower curtain before doing this project. If you’re at the beach, just take out some paper plates and collect sand. If you’re using white sand, colored plates might work best. Little glue bottles can be distributed to older children, and younger children can use some glue in a jar lid. Paint the glue on paper. Children are putting glue where they want sand to be. After having painted with glue, sprinkle the sand on the page. Then shake it off. If you’re using fancy colored sand, having a tray under the paper so as to collect and reuse the excess sand may be wise. If so, one color at a time would be good. If so, put the glue where you want the specific color to go and sprinkle that color sand. After dumping off excess, put more glue on paper for the next color. (Pre-schoolers do better with just one color as they typically don’t want to stop painting with the glue.) Small word of warning: be careful not to let the glue dry before you put on the sand.

Race for the Colors

You can use colored paper plates. Or cardboard/white paper that you’ve colored on. This game is for learning colors. You always start with two colors in order to be less confusing to the children. For instance, if there are five kids, you would have five blue plates and five yellow plates. The kids start on one side of the room, with the plates down the other side – all mixed up. The adult then says, “When I say a color, rush over (walk quickly, if desired) and pick up the color I said.” The little ones may need guidance over to the plates. If they pick up another color, say nicely, “Oh good. That’s blue. Where’s yellow? Bring it back to me.” This activity is helpful because it gets exercise out and enhances learning of colors. You’ll want to add in colors as they learn more.

There are many activities one can do with children while staying inside and getting energy out. Today, we’ll list a few ideas to get you through the spring showers that lead to summer flowers!

Obstacle Course

As with most of these activities, it’s all about using what you have on hand. An obstacle course can be constructed of anything like a rope laid out on the floor or some masking tape to make a tight rope to balance across. If you have unbreakable, sturdy bowls these could also be used for balancing on when turned upside down. Set out any kind of container that can catch bean bags (or rolled up socks) when they are tossed. Use a tunnel or box as an obstacle to crawl through, over, under, balance/climb on, or jump off of landing on a soft couch cushion. As long as the children are safe, there are many options available.

Balloon Paddle

A balloon hung in a doorway can be very useful for many activities. To secure the balloon, you may want to screw an eye hook into the middle of the door frame (making sure it won’t keep the door from closing) and hang the balloon from it to the height of the child’s waist. Then the little one can use their hand to practice forehand hitting, backhand, overhead, smashing it from up high, and so on. This game promotes eye-hand coordination and is the first step toward any racket sport. Once the child is good at using their hand to hit the balloon, you can move on to a lightweight paddle. Here is a link to making your own paddle.

A quick note on the choice of balloon material: It is preferable to use Mylar over latex as when latex balloons pop it is very dangerous if a piece is sucked into the child’s lungs. When using a Mylar balloon (after the helium is gone), stick a drinking straw into the hole and blow it up again before hanging it. Once the balloon skills have been mastered, the next level would be a whiffle ball.

Balloon Volleyball

This is an activity that can be done individually, and it is a great option for a family game time too. Instead of a net, make a barrier with chairs or a couch and hit the balloon back and forth over it. It is best to use your hands instead of a paddle due to the close contact of the players. (We learned that one the hard way!)

Fast Feet

Fast Feet is all about learning how to walk and run in place. Nothing extra is required for this activity other than an adult or older child to call out the direction the child should face. A story could add a lot to this by involving the child in an adventure. They walk (in place) through a forest, starting at a normal pace. (If the child has difficulty staying in one spot, a hula hoop or taped square on the floor may help.) To get a feel for the speed of the walk, the older helper can clap their hands on their knees at that normal pace. Then, as the story takes an interesting turn (perhaps when a T-rex enters the forest), the clapping speeds up and the walking child needs to run in place – “fast feet!” This can go so many different directions – crouching to hide in a bush, rolling over, tiptoeing, slow motion, and all over again. Here's another variation: Is the floor moving?

Following directions is a great skill that comes out of this game as well as aerobic exercise with the fast/slow, up/down nature of the movements. On a fun filled adventure with lots of laughter, it may only take a couple of minutes before they get worn out. The key is that they learn how to listen and follow directions which is wonderful to do in game form as they don’t even realize they are working and learning!

Jump the River

First, a river is made on the floor. The cheapest way to do this is to use the least expensive, least sticky tape you have (often masking tape) that will not leave a mark on the floor. Make the river into a “V” shape going from about 6 inches apart to almost 2 feet apart. The child can start on the narrow end of the river and jump across. After that part of the river has been traversed, the child can move one step over each time as it gets wider and wider. On the widest end, sturdy bowls (as mentioned above) can be used upside down as stepping stones. Fun additions to this game are rubber snakes or toy alligators placed in the “water” to add to the excitement.

Jump the River is working on the really good skills that lead to standing broad jump and leaping (feet far apart, one foot in front of the other, starting with one foot and landing with the other). In the house, jumping is more controlled than leaping. An alternative idea is to tape two parallel lines on the floor and have the child crab walk, bear walk, etc. down the parallel bars. We've covered this game before here.

Dancing on Slick Paper

Taking some waxy or shiny newspaper ads (don’t use regular newspaper as it gets print on everything), give each child a piece of slick paper. (They are a little more slippery on hard floors.) Let everyone know that it is okay if their paper rips. Then pick out some instrumental music with a fun, fast beat (banjo music?). Tell them, “I’ll give directions when I turn on the music, so listen carefully and try to do what I say.”

First, just try to get them to bob or clap to the beat. This is teaching them to hear the beat. Then try a little more, like dancing down low, up on their toes, turning in a circle, one foot then the other, on their knees, etc. – but always staying on the paper! Try to model safety if things start getting out of control, like suggesting to slow things down. Add whatever you can think of that’s safe and fun. Have them make their elbows dance on the paper! End with the kids dancing any funny way they want.

For an extra bit of fun, after the dance have them pick up every little piece of paper and roll it into balls. Have a snowball fight! (Free-for-all or with teams and a rope down the middle.) Finally, everyone helps put the paper in the recycling to finish it off.

Blocks with Numbers

We’ve linked Kirby’s tutorial for making a block here. Once the cube is made, put numbers on each side. Each take turns rolling it and jumping the number of times as the number that lands face-up.

Socks, Socks, and more Socks!

Roll up socks into balls and have another snowball fight.

Use a coat-hanger paddle – remember the kind with pantyhose stretched over a coat hanger bent into the shape of a paddle? – to carry a rolled up sock (or balloon) around balancing it. Or bounce the sock ball up and down on it.

These activities – and many more – can brighten any dreary day. I’ve even used these when a child is home with a fever and not too sick anymore. Enjoy!

Research that was done years ago came to show that cultures that allow children to participate in the normal activities of the home (e.g. tending to the goats, feeding the chickens) – that is, cultures that value the contribution of the children to the family – see a lot of success from these children in later years. They grow up to have a good work ethic, a higher sense of responsibility, hard-working practices, and a solid self-esteem.

Chores may be a thing of the past in many homes today. There are modern conveniences that one might hope would render chores obsolete – or that’s what the sales people suggest. Or the parents simply need to get things done in the limited amount of time they have in their busy schedules. And let’s face it, some in our generation may resent being made to do chores in our youth and do not wish to “put our kids through that”.

But let’s pause for a moment. We may want to ponder the significant benefits seen in these other cultures where children are valued for the work they are doing in their young years. There are long-term results that impact their lives – for the better. So in your own family, talk about what each child is actually able to do that would be a contribution to the lifestyle of the home.

Example 1 – They can make their own bed

An easy example is making their bed as soon as they get up in the morning. With younger children, it may help to tie the corners of the blanket and sheet to the bed posts at the foot of the bed (and maybe even one top corner) so all they have to do is pull up and smooth out. The main point is this: think of things that would help the family for them to do, things that would add to the family and build good habits.

Example 2 – They can put their own toys away

Another example is putting toys away. This is a doable task – if it is broken down into smaller tasks. Every toy has a place. Put one away before getting out another. Bins can be made with picture-labels showing what items go in each bin. (This develops pre-reading skills too.) Say to the two year old, “Let’s find all the dolls. They go here.” (Learning how to categorize also helps the wee one develop pre-math skills.) It is not helpful to tell a child to tidy all the toys in general. It can be overwhelming to think of putting everything away. It is better to ask them to pick up, for example, all the building blocks, or some specific type of toy.

In fact, every night before dinner the whole family can work together to put toys away. They are a contributing member of the family. By the way, this can happen anytime really, not just before dinner. Just make it work for your schedule. If you have reading and bedtime routine after dinner, then tidying the house before dinner will allow a smoother evening thereafter.

If time allows, a reward with something they would want to do can be offered. Possibly even something you would do anyway such as reading a story together can be a treat after working together. Choose what would be a delight to the child. And you know, if the whole house is a wreck (and we know what that’s like!), get your child to work with you to piece away at it throughout the day. (Be careful that older children are not always picking up for the younger ones which may cause resentment.)

Example 3 – Make a “chore” a game.

Let our kids do real tasks. It may even be fun to help Mom with the cooking – dump in, cut up (with plastic knives), etc. If Kirby had her choice, she would get rid of the word “chores” altogether because it typically denotes something undesirable. (“Oh, that is such a chore!”) But you know what? The task may not be something desirable to do, but it can be made into a game. Try “Beat the Clock”. The family can gather around a bowl that has all the tasks needing done written on slips of paper. Everyone picks a slip from the bowl to get their assignment.

The bottom line is this: this is what families do – they help each other.

Some Practical Points

Be Sensitive to Differences. What works for one child may not work for another when it comes to giving out tasks. A child with difficulty processing may appear to not be listening but in reality may just need more from you. First, break down the task further into smaller parts. Second, stay in the room with them while training them to do the job. Finally, are they still processing? Put the task in picture form. Make a chart if you think it’s needed and they can check off their accomplishment once completed.

Be Specific. Again, in our communication with wee ones, it is good to remember to be specific. What may look like a clean room to a child may not appear to be anything like what a parent would expect a clean room to look. We have to train our children.

Don’t Pass Along Prejudices. We also must be aware of ourselves in this whole process. We have to know them and their personalities while realizing that we may have children who are like ourselves – in the good and the not so good. What we don’t like about ourselves may be reflected back to us through our children. Those areas we are learning to be patient with ourselves may get a lot more practice when our littles come along. We need to be careful that we don’t pass down our own prejudices or distaste for certain responsibilities, certain chores, to our progeny.

Be Fun. There are ways to make everything fun. At any age tasks can still be made into a game. Change the reward system to fit the age of the child. As much as possible, make the reward something relational, like a family game night – a way of being together and enjoying each other after working alongside one another.

Conclusions

Going back to the cultures that successfully involve their children in the functioning aspects of the household – much of the rewards they reap come from the response to the children as they work. The focus is not on whether the task is done to the level the adult would have done it or in the time frame an older person could have accomplished it. The children are thanked. There is a genuine appreciation. They are learning to want to help and to want to contribute more to the family.

My 5 year old daughter had been with her father much of the morning spending time together reading and doing schoolwork alongside him as he worked. Shortly after lunch, Grandma came and played with her for a while. By this time, her love bucket was so full from quality time that she declared she was in the mood to help. She spent over an hour helping to prepare dinner. There was much appreciation expressed at the dinner table for the work she put in to make the food. She felt truly valued for her contribution to the family (which started out with us investing in her and then her wanting to give back).

Children do not automatically know things. We wish they did. Sometimes we think they do. But often times young children – and all of us for that matter – do not know something that we think they understand or we think that we’ve communicated clearly… but did the message come through really?

They’re in doubt, so point it out.

Point out how they can communicate that they want or need something.

Children come into this world knowing nothing. In fact, at first all they are trying to do is get their needs met. Crying is the only available option of communication. Then they become toddlers who discover that, hey presto!, snatching that toy just got their needs (or wants) met. Whining, complaining, shouting, tantruming (that may not be a real word, but we know what it is!)… there are many forms of communication to choose from which all accomplish the goal of trying to get needs met. And they don’t know not to use these; they just know that they work. They’re in doubt about how to get their needs met, so point it out.

Our job as parents is to try to meet their needs and to teach them better ways to communicate, more acceptable ways to tell us what they need or want. When they are trying to communicate (perhaps in one of the less-than-desirable ways mentioned above), we can respond with: “I see you want/need…” or “Your crying makes me think you want/need…” or “When you snatched that toy you were trying to say that you want that toy. But no snatching.” Then we can go on to tell them what they can say in place of just grabbing something away from someone else. There’s also the option of teaching the sign for “please”. Then they can say what they are wanting along with the sign. (By the way, signing is helpful, but it should be done while speaking the words.)

The point is to teach them how to ask for something they want or need. They’re in doubt, so point it out.

Let’s think about a concrete scenario we all face. What if the child is whining when they are hungry?

Let them know that you understand that they want food,

but that whining is not the best way to communicate this,

then let them know how to ask.

And hopefully a snack can be provided to meet their need.

But there are always those times when we’re caught out without having replenished our supply, right? What then? We can reassure the child that food will be coming soon. And this is when distraction is a powerful tool. Again, the goal we’re working toward is getting our little people to use their words to meet their needs. They don’t automatically know how. They’re in doubt, so point it out. And already by the age of two a lot of children have the ability to say a two word sentence and can work on this goal with us.

Point out your love to them throughout this teaching process.

Remember, children are reading body language (facial expressions, etc.) as well as our words. All of this works together to tell them who they are. It tells them we love them no matter what they do. You can correct them and show them that you love them – at the same time. Correcting and teaching them tells them that their choices matter and that what they choose to do can help or hurt themselves and/or others. But it is still more powerful to show your child that you love them while telling them that a certain form of communication is not good versus what is good.

Children may doubt our love if we do not point it out. They’re in doubt, so point it out. We need to tell them that we love them. This is not an automatic thing with kids, and simply meeting their needs and providing for them won’t let them know we love them. Many children experience love through physical touch such as closeness when reading a book to them or a cuddle. Words of encouragement are very often a great way to express love to our littles. Use any way you know how to show them love; there are lots of different “love languages” you can use.

Point out our expectations, for children cannot read our minds.

We need to be incredibly clear – more clear and explicit than you might think – what our expectations are when communicating with our children. This may change as children get older. They do learn to read our intentions, to some extent. However – and this is important – instead of becoming less needy for our affirmation, they become more so. When they are little, children are mostly around people who affirm them to some degree. As they grow and get out into the world more, there will be a lot of negativity coming their way. It is new and unsettling. We need to be a safe haven where they know that they are loved unconditionally.

The holidays can give family a wonderful opportunity to share the deeper meaning behind these celebrations, whether it’s the birth of Christ at Christmas or the miracle of the light at Hanukkah. Hopefully the activities we introduce you to today can help get your kids to think beyond what they are receiving and get to a better perspective: this is a time to give gifts of love, which is a huge part of many holiday traditions.

Act It Out

Act out the story of the holiday using a set of unbreakable figurines such as a nativity set or menorah. Make sure every child has a part to play. One of the adults can read the story while the others act it out. This can be as long or short as you deem necessary depending on the age and attention span of the children. It is important that the children be involved in the story.

Stained Glass

Using a baby food jar or clear plastic bottle, paint the outside with white glue. Take strips of multi-colored tissue paper and stick it onto the glue covering the whole jar with paper. The next day, when the bottom layer of glue has dried, paint another layer of glue on top of the paper to seal it in. The jar will have a stained glass look to it.

If you want to take it further, hot wax can be dripped into the middle of the bottom of the jar to have a small candle like a birthday candle stuck to it. The light and beauty that your kids had a hands-on experience with can then be spoken about in relation to the tradition/celebration. This is an abstract idea, but it gives the family a craft that can be done together with the children in a key part of the process.

Block Activity

Take a cube (or make a cube out of a piece of paper – a tutorial for this is provided on the blog here) and on each side stick a picture symbolizing an activity. Roll the block and do the activity together. Some ideas for symbols to go on the block and types of activities are: musical note = sing a (Christmas) song, face with open mouth = give thanks for something, hands clapping = clap a rhythm, candy cane = eat a piece of candy, hands praying = say a prayer, ornament = place an ornament on the tree.

The main thing is to get the children to have the patience to roll it and to see the family having a fun time together. With activities like giving thanks or praying, this also gets the children to think beyond themselves, to pray for others, to think of family needs. Thinking of others is the first step in learning compassion and empathy.

Musical Instruments

Making musical instruments together will enhance the singing holiday songs together. Dried beans or raw popcorn can be put inside of plastic eggs (which should then be taped closed – otherwise things get messy quickly!) to make castanet-type instruments. This can also be done with an empty toilet paper tube that is sealed at both ends. Pinch one end of the tube and seal with tape. Then add the shaker ingredients as above. Pinch off the other end like the first, though make the pinch perpendicular to the first end’s pinched seal. (This keeps the whole tube from flattening out and thus helps the beans have more room to rattle.)

Another idea is to take little jingle bells and loop elastic through the top of them. Then tie them around the little ankle or wrists. This turns their cute dance moves into a musical experience.

Holiday Feel Box

Pick out a box that is medium sized, like a shoe box or diaper box. Then put items inside that have to do with the day you’re celebrating. (Food may not be best – a bit too messy.) For Christmas time, these might be an ornament, a plastic candy cane, a bell, a little stocking, a candle, a tiny tree, a soft pine cone, etc. Make a hole in one end of the box for the child to reach in. If desired, use the tube part of a sock to attach to the hole so that the child cannot peak inside. Then tape the box closed on all sides. Stick a hand in, make a guess, and enjoy the fun!

Advent Calendar

It’s a little late to start an advent calendar this year, but this is a fun way to count down to the special day and increase the excitement as the anticipation grows with each day. We have a book that gives a song and a reading for each day in December, and we read it and sing it together at breakfast time to start each day.

There are many ways to involve our children in the holidays. Some may have been passed down from generation to generation. In our family, a candle is lit at 9 pm on Christmas day and a prayer is said for peace on earth. Started as a tradition in Europe, the idea is that if people in every time zone around the world did the same thing at their 9 pm, then there would be 24 hours of prayer for peace on earth at least one day out of the year. Whatever ways you choose to involve your children in the celebrations this time of year, may it be a time of coming together and giving thanks and love for our past, present, and future.

Anyone else having trouble getting your toddlers to not touch holiday breakables, power cords, Christmas trees and the like?

Small children (under 3 years old) don’t know their own strength. And they often drop things. But, as we all know, if such things break they could cut them. This becomes a safety issue. How can we protect our wee ones? Here are some very practical suggestions.

The first step is to move things up beyond the reach of the child. This changes when a crawler becomes a walker, who then becomes a climber. So get things out of reach and keep them out of reach.

Second, if you can’t get the item up higher, try blocking it with something else such as furniture. It needs to be something big enough that the breakable item is out of sight. It is important to note that children who have reached full object permanence (that is, the ability to remember that something still exists even if they cannot see it) will keep looking tenaciously for the item if that fits with their personality.

Third, at some point we’re going to need to teach our child that there are things that are “no touch”. Two things are helpful to remember. We do not want to create a negative environment, where “no” is constantly resounding. What is more, keeping the word “no” for danger helps it carry still more power.

Fourth, in place of “no” young children can often be redirected to a different activity quite easily. Keep in mind that some children do have that ability to fixate on something, so it may take more diligent watching to ensure these children have truly moved on to the next activity.

Fifth, in place of actually touching the item you can try a replacement behavior. The child could point to the item, clap for it, whatever is fun to do instead of going to grab it. A sixteen month old in our family was on a hunt for power cords and breakables. She was taught that she could wave to the item as a replacement behavior for touching it. She was satisfied with merely being friendly toward the cords and stopped trying to grab them. Whatever the replacement behavior is, make sure it is a fun action that the child enjoys doing and already understands what it means. (For instance, my niece clearly knows that when she waves at people that does not mean they are breakable or dangerous.)

As another type of replacement behavior, and for children who are already learning what it means to be gentle, you can teach the one-finger touch in place of a firm grab. Take down the item and hold it while they do a one finger touch and then put it back up high.

Setting up an environment for safety and safe learning is essential for toddlers. It keeps the child safe, and it keeps the items from breaking. Be sure to keep some things within reach that are okay for them to learn to touch gently. It is in your power to choose what objects will be safest for your child to learn the art of gentleness.

Read more]]>christen@christenhansel.com (Kirby &amp; Christen)ParentingFri, 23 Dec 2016 20:14:59 -0500Teaching a tired and hungry child is like trying to get a toad to smile.http://growthandgiggles.com/blog/entry/teaching-a-tired-and-hungry-child-is-like-trying-to-get-a-toad-to-smile
http://growthandgiggles.com/blog/entry/teaching-a-tired-and-hungry-child-is-like-trying-to-get-a-toad-to-smile

Depending on our personality and energy level, we parents often stack the calendar to run the errands all at once. However, with young children in tow this can backfire and have knock-on effects. (Though remember, all children are different.) Their mood can change as quickly as a faucet turns on or off. A meltdown often comes without warning. Sometimes, though, there are tell-tale signs in their body language. The key is to stop before they crash, and the key to that is to know your child.

Know when your child’s energy is gone, or nearly gone. Some children’s metabolism may need a regular snack to keep them going. It is highly recommended to have some healthy snacks on hand wherever you go. When you are aware of your child’s needs, you will be able to pull out some raisins or pretzels in the car, or some cheese or “fairy sandwiches” at home. There’s fresh fruit, of course. And fresh vegetables such as carrots or celery sticks are good options as well. Hey, even canned cut green beans can work!

But not every case of the grumps is from hunger. Sometimes if they are not sure how long your errands will last they can begin to get agitated. As you may recall from previous posts, children thrive on routine, on knowing what to expect. So even if you are a more unscheduled kind of person, find some sort of balance for the both of you so your child has some sense of what’s coming next – or when it all will end. This will help you discern when their grumps are coming from a crazy schedule or simply from tired hunger (“tunger”? Which can make them “hangry”).

But we also don’t want to create emotional eaters, so here are two things to keep in mind:

Check your schedule and purposefully try not to pack it out past the point of your child’s ability to cope.

Make sure you’re able to meet their needs. If it’s hunger, try to meet that need with something healthy. If it’s not hunger, don’t use food.

So how can you make such distinctions and decisions? Take any behavior that needs changing – temper tantrums, whining, etc. – and pay attention to when it happens and how it starts to happen. You may notice patterns that give you a hint at the energy levels, body rhythms, and physical needs of your child. If needed, even keep a written record of the times for wake up, eating, eliminating, tiredness, higher energy levels, napping, etc. and make a chart to get a better picture of these rhythms.

How does this relate to learning?

Not only can all of this help your errand times go more smoothly, but children learn best when they are well rested, well fed, and happy. This is the best environment and time to help a child learn anything. If we take care of their physical needs – such as sleep and food – other things, like learning, will go more smoothly. But remember, kids are different from each other. Some children are “high maintenance”, not in a negative sense, but in that they need lots of rest and more frequent rest or they will burn out quickly. Others can go and go and go before they fizzle. Think of them like types of fire wood. Like dry tinder, “high maintenance” kids’ energy burns fast and goes out quickly. Other kids have energy like kindling, which is a bit thicker than tinder, taking a bit longer to burn out and lasting a bit longer. Lastly others can have energy like logs, lasting the longest before even starting to burn out. As far as percentages, it is like a bell curve: most children would be kindling (in the middle) and fewer children would be tinder or logs (the two extremes).