Shipping is an amazing part of fandom. Once you find a pairing that you like, you then start reading all the fanfiction, looking at all the fanart, creating these fanworks yourself, squeeing with people who also like the same pairing. It's a great community to share the interest of two (or more) characters. There is no better feeling than finding kindred spirits in a specific fandom who understand the love of characters and pairings and just the universe in general. It's a beautiful thing.

The biggest downside, though, comes from shipping wars. This is a huge negative in any fandom space, and it can get absolutely vicious. And for what? What does fighting with someone over shipping differences ever achieve, other than endless wank? At the end of the day, it's all personal preference that not everyone will agree with, but everyone should respect the boundaries of every fan's right to enjoy. Don't harsh their excitement just because you don't personally like it. It's that simple. There's also the issue with tinhatters, extreme shippers who truly believe that their ship is real and will try to convince not just other fans, but crossing the boundaries to bombard actors and creators to pander to their shipping needs within canon (or, in the case of RPS, wanting it to happen IRL even going so far as harassing the real life actors.) But they are in a different league entirely on their own, and something I actively try to avoid at all costs.

But in my opinion, the positive outweigh the (very loud) negative. Fandom is supposed to be a safe happy place, and shipping should be enjoyed by anyone and everyone as long as we respect each other. :)

I'm definitely giddy over my OTPs, and even if I don't agree with other people's shipping choices I'm not going to harsh their excitement because I definitely wouldn't want someone to do that to me.

Also, when has harassing someone over what they ship ever accomplish anything? When has saying, "you're ship is wrong and disgusting mine is so much better" ever resulted into the other person going, "you are so right I have finally seen the light"? Like, it's ridiculous to assume that such a tactic would even work to chance someone's mind.

Shipping is my favorite part of fandom, tbh, but I absolutely see the downside of it, too. Ship wars are ridiculous even when they don't get ugly and they get ugly 98% of the time. There's also the problem that if 90% of the fandom ships something you don't, you feel left out. Sometimes you are actively left out/harassed because you don't ship it. So...yeah...shipping can be a bad thing but I still love the frak out of it.

There's also the problem that if 90% of the fandom ships something you don't, you feel left out. Sometimes you are actively left out/harassed because you don't ship it.

Oh, for sure. That kind of passive aggressive attitude definitely stings, because it's like you're basically shunned by the majority of the fandom for not liking a particular thing. It's like straight up "you're not welcome in our circle" immature junior high behavior.

Fandom should be a welcoming community for everyone, regardless of who you ship.

This is all so true. My least favorite part is when fans of a certain ship lash out at a character who gets in the way of that ship- but fans who bring it up to the actors and so forth make me cringe a bit too. But at least 90% of the time I think it's all worth it because it is, as you say, a big part of what makes fandom so great.

I hate the lashing out at other characters who get "get in the way" of a particular ships. Because it's ridiculous. It's even worse when that hate transcends onto the actors themselves and then people can't differentiate between the actor and the character. And it's always women who get that kind of hate, and it's horrible.

Very well put! I don't ship as passionately as I used to but I don't think I was ever in a place where I got into a shipping war and actually had drama with people just because they liked a different fictional couple.

Thank you for touching on the RPS and that kind of harassment. I've seen it take place at conventions and it's just uncomfortable for everyone when people don't realize that the characters people want the actors to be just aren't real.

I'm the same. I've come to a neutral place in my shipping activities. Fighting and starting wars over something like that never achieves anything, and nobody ever wins. It's just not worth it, imho.

I've seen it take place at conventions and it's just uncomfortable for everyone when people don't realize that the characters people want the actors to be just aren't real.

Yeah, the lack of differentiating between fantasy and reality when it comes to those situations is quite embarrassing. They're so wrapped up in their particular shipping mindset that they can't comprehend how inappropriate and disrespectful they're being, and it kind of ruins the fun and enjoyment for everyone, especially for the actors in question.

I've seen a few awkward situations where people just couldn't see the actors as people and it really is awful for everyone. I actually was behind a guy in line to get an autograph from Magda Apanowicz who brought her a gift and it was just so awkward and he clearly thought she'd fall in love with him and she was naive enough that she wasn't able to brush him off. She was trying and he wasn't getting the hint. I finally turned to my friend and said "this is awkward" loudly enough for the gift giver to hear and he left. I felt badly for him but she was so uncomfortable and the guy was clearly not understanding that they weren't about to have a romantic get together.