Fantastic Max

Walt Disney Pictures/Marvel
San Diego Comic-Con is nerd culture's second Christmas, and every year the annual ode to all things geek gets bigger and better, with film studios jostling each other for the biggest moment of the weekend. This year, the con's legendary Hall H will likely be the home of some game-changing reveals, dizzying sizzle reels, and exclusive trailers that may just be worth the dozen or so hours of waiting on line to get in. Here's a look at what we're expecting from the big film studio panels at Comic-Con:
Warner Bros.
Jupiter Ascending: The Wachowskis' latest, Jupiter Ascending, was supposed to make landfall this summer but was delayed just a few weeks away from its expected release date and sent to February — which is basically Hollywood's graveyard for lackluster films. This year's con has to be all about assuaging fears and ensuring fans that the film isn't a complete disaster. Showing a lengthy, eye-popping sequence from the film would be a great way to keep expectant fans at ease.
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies: As it turns the bend toward the final film in the franchise, The Hobbit series is pretty much in cruise control. We know what to expect from Peter Jackson's last hurrah in the Tolkien-verse but flames can still be fanned. We're hoping for some new footage for the upcoming film and more, since Jackson will be in attendance.
Mad Max: Fury Road: We've seen some dusty set photos from this post-apocalyptic epic, and the cast looks appropriately dirty and world weary, but what we really want to see is some footage. Since the film is set to release next May, a trailer of some sort is surely imminent.
Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice: Curiously absent from the list of films showing at the Warner Bros. panel, Dawn of Justice is the biggest question mark of the con. Can Warner Bros. really walk into Hall H without a bit of Batman up their sleeves? We're gonna go with no. We're betting the studio is saving something huge for a giant payload of hype to end their conference with. If not, then Marvel has already won Comic-Con - if you believe in the notion of winning these sorts of things. Considering we've already seen glimpses of Affleck kitted out in the Bat Suit and the new Bat Mobile, we're gonna need something pretty cool.
Marvel
Avengers: Age of Ultron: Marvel's Avengers sequel is bar-none the biggest film at the con, and since the film has been shooting for months at this point, and the cast is descending on San Diego for the event, there's definitely going to be something big showing. If not, expect San Diego to be scorched to the earth in the ensuing fan rage.
Ant-Man: After losing longtime director Edgar Wright and a very worrying scramble to find a suitable replacement, Ant-Man, formerly Marvel's most promising film, is looking worse for wear. Some fans even swore off the film entirely the second Wright was jettisoned from the project. Some serious damage control is on the bill this year. The studio needs to show something tangible, like a costume or some early footage, to get the hype machine rolling again.
Guardians of the Galaxy: Since Guardians is so close to release, some Hall H faithful are expecting a screening of the film. We're doubtful that Marvel will preview the entire movie, but we are expecting to see a lengthy preview of the film. Perhaps something like the 17 minutes of the finished film shown to journalists earlier this month.
Everything Else: Sure, Marvel is king of the mountain now, but keeping that title means keeping everyone happy in the near and distant future. Marvel should add a couple more pin-drops to their map of Phase 3, and announce some anticipated films like Black Panther and Captain Marvel, but also dish about upcoming projects like Thor 3 and Doctor Strange.
20th Century Fox
X-Men: Apocalypse: Since Days of Future Past just dropped earlier this summer, we're not expecting a whole lot on the X-Men side of things, but the studio would be remiss if they didn't at least hint at something X-Men related, especially given the great post-credit sequence at the end of the last film.Fantastic Four: With its oddball casting, Fantastic Four might be the most heavily scrutinized superhero film to appear at the con. Since shooting has already begun, Fox needs to prove to fans that they know what they're doing. Some test footage from the project would be great.
Everything Else: Everyone's making huge, interconnected franchises these days, and we wonder if Fox will put it's own hat in the ring. Even though their list of properties is pretty scant, the promise of a sprawling blockbuster universe might be too appealing to resist. Can there be a X-Men/Fantastic Four meet-up? Stranger things have happened. Otherwise, also expect additional news and clips from Let's Be Cops, The Maze Runner, The Book of Life, Kingsman: The Secret Service, and hopefully, a first trailer for Hitman: Agent 47.
ParamountTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The film is basically out at this point, so there really isn't much to do besides add some last minute fuel to the hype machine. The film does have its share of detractors due to Michael Bay's involvement and a mixed reaction to the new turtle designs. An early screening to Comic-Con attendees might win the film some brownie points with fans.
Interstellar: This is one instance where less is most certainly more. Christopher Nolan's mysterious space adventure is probably the year's biggest question mark, and that's the way things should be. Universal should keep its cards close to its vest and let the enigmatic nature of the project be its own marketing tool. The Nolan pedigree will likely brig in a big audience. A new trailer would be fine, but lets keep the plot points to a minimum.
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FOX Broadcasting
When Fox announced that they were dropping the standard pilot-season model of developing new TV shows; it earned them a great deal of attention from fans and critics. So when they unveiled their Fall 2014-2015 schedule, everyone's focus went straight to the slate of new shows premiering in the next few months — after all, they have to be good if Fox is willing to gamble on a brand new way of doing things. In certain cases, it seems like the gamble might just have paid off — you can't go wrong with Batman or British remakes, right? - but others seem like they'll only rub salt in the wound of recent cancellations.
We've run down all of Fox's upcoming series in order to predict which ones will live up to the hype and be worth your time come fall. Although sadly, none of them seem likely to fill the Enlisted-shaped hole in our hearts.
Gotham What It Is: DramaWhat It's About: Following Det. Jim Gordon and the Gotham City Police Department as they deal with the crime and corruption that plagues the city, and Gordon attempts to find Who's In It: Ben McKenzie, Donal Logue, Sean Pertwee and Jada Pinkett-SmithWhat It Sounds Like: It's basically Batman, minus Batman himself. How Good Will It Be: Based on the first trailer for the show, it looks like it could be exciting and gritty, although tiny Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle do make us a bit wary. Still, it's got a talented cast on board, so if the show can keep the visuals and story interesting, it could be surprisingly good. How Long It Will Last: At least two seasons. Fox has thrown a lot of support behind Gotham, so they won't let it go easily.
UtopiaWhat It Is: Reality showWhat It's About: 15 people move to an isolated, undeveloped location for a year and attempt to build their own society from scratch. Who's In It: No word yet, but they have to be crazy if they're willing to sign up for this. What It Sounds Like: Big Brother meets Survivor, with a dash of Kid Nation. How Good Will It Be: It depends entirely on the cast, but our best bet is that it will either be outright terrible, or horrifically entertaining. How Long It Will Last: Unfortunately, it will probably run for ten years.
Red Band SocietyWhat It Is: Drama What It's About: A coming-of-age story set in the pediatric ward of a hospital that follows a group of patients as they grow, bond, and battle illnesses. Who's In It: Octavia Spencer, Griffin Gluck, Charlie Rowe, Dave Annable, Brian Bradley aka Astro, Ciara Bravo and Zoe LevinWhat It Sounds Like: One Tree Hill meets Grey's Anatomy, except only one person is in a coma. How Good Will It Be: Spencer is generally the best part of everything she does, but even she might not be enough to make the many elements of this show — comedy, drama, tear-jerking moments of triumph, general teenage drama, hospital administration — blend well together. How Long It Will Last: About a season. Even if it is good, it will probably struggle to find an audience.
GracepointWhat It Is: Drama What It's About: Based on the British series Broadchurch, it centers on a small town and the murder that upends the lives of all of its residents. Who's In It: David Tennant, Anna Gunn, Michael Peña, Jacki Weaver, Kevin Zegers and Jessica LucasWhat It Sounds Like: It's literally just Broadchurch with Tennant doing an American accent. How Good Will It Be: A lot depends on how much they take from the original, but since that was such a good series and they've got a fantastic cast on board, things look good for Gracepoint. How Long It Will Last: At least three seasons, regardless of how closely it hews to the original.
Backstrom What It Is: Drama What It's About: A crime procedural about an obnoxious and offensive, but brilliant detective who is brought back from exile to run the special crimes unit. Who's In It: Rainn Wilson, Dennis Haysbert, Thomas Dekker, Beatrice Rosen and Kristoffer PolahaWhat It Sounds Like: Every other "rogue cop" procedural that's hit the air in the last few year, but with Dwight from The OfficeHow Good Will It Be: It has a pretty decent cast, but the premise is something we've seen before many times, with varying levels of success, so there's a lot against it. A lot is riding on Wilson, although it's his first real foray into drama, which also doesn't bode well. How Long It Will Last: Like almost every other crime procedural premiering this fall, it will probably be canceled within the year.
Mulaney What It Is: SitcomWhat It's About: An aspiring stand-up comic gets a job writing jokes for a narcissistic comedian and game show host, which causes conflict between him and his two best friends and roommates. Who's In It: John Mulaney, Martin Short, Nasim Pedrad, Seaton Smith and Elliott GouldWhat It Sounds Like: Seinfeld meets New Girl, with a touch of 30 Rock How Good Will It Be: The cast is fantastic, but multi-cam sitcoms can be pretty hit or miss, and this one was dropped by NBC and then reworked before FOX picks it up. However, the combination of SNL alums and comic legends means this one will probably be one of your new favorite shows. How Long It Will Last: Sunday night at 9:30 is a tough slot, but we think this one will scrape its way to a second season.
FOX Broadcasting
EmpireWhat It Is: Drama What It's About: It follows Lucious Lyon, the head of a major hip hop record label and the ex-wife and family who are competing to take over the family business. Who's In It: Terrence Howard, Taraji P. Henson, Gabourey Sidibe, Bryshere Gray, Jussie Smollett, Trai Byers and Kaitlin DoubledayWhat It Sounds Like: Hustle and Flow meets Nashville How Good Will It Be: Empire has a lot of big-name talent behind it - in addition to the Oscar-nominated cast, it was created by Lee Daniels and written by Danny Strong — but it seems like the kind of show that would fare better on cable, so it might end up being a little lackluster. How Long It Will Last: Well, Nashville got three seasons, so we're predicting Empire will get the same.
Hieroglyph What It Is: Drama What It's About: After he gets caught stealing a magic scroll, a thief is brought to work for the Pharaoh, only to discover that court might be more dangerous than prison. Who's In It: Max Brown, Reece Ritchie, Condola Rashad, Caroline Ford and John Rhys-DaviesWhat It Sounds Like: Game of Thrones meets Sleepy Hollow, set in Ancient Egypt. How Good Will It Be: It's written by Travis Beacham, who wrote Pacific Rim, so it could turn out to be entertaining and campy. However, it's completely ridiculous-sounding, so the odds are against it. How Long It Will Last: Unless it manages to pull in a devoted audience like Sleepy Hollow, probably only one season.
Wayward Pines What It Is: Drama What It's About: An idyllic American town... that you can never leave. Who's In It: Matt Dillon, Carla Gugino, Melissa Leo, Tobey Jones, Juliette Lewis and Terrence HowardWhat It Sounds Like: The Stepford Wives meets The Twilight Zone How Good Will It Be: On the one hand, it's got an impressive A-List cast. On the other, it's executive-produced by M. Night Shamylan, so we're hoping it will be good, but expecting it to be terrible. How Long It Will Last: The Shamylan outrage will bring attention to it, resulting in it just barely earning a second season.
Bordertown What It Is: Animated sitcomWhat It's About: Set on a town that borders the US and Mexico, it follows two families as they navigate life, relationships and politics. Who's In It: Alex Borstein, Nicholas Gonzalez, Judah Friedlander, Missi Pyle and Efren RamirezWhat It Sounds Like: American Dad meets The Cleveland ShowHow Good Will It Be: The last time Seth MacFarlane made a show about racial and family dynamics, we got Dads, so we're not optimistic. How Long It Will Last: 5 years at a minimum
Last Man on Earth What It Is: SitcomWhat It's About: After an apocalypse wipes out all of humanity except one man, he wanders the earth looking for other survivors. Who's In It: Will ForteWhat It Sounds Like: Zombieland, minus the other peopleHow Good Will It Be: Forte is hilarious, and his recent dramatic turn in Nebraska will probably serve him well, but it's hard to see how this concept will last longer than one episode. How Long It Will Last: It's a quirky comedy from an SNL alum that isn't Amy Poehler, Tina Fey or Jimmy Fallon. It'll get a year if we're lucky.
Weird LonersWhat It Is: SitcomWhat It's About: Four relationship-phobic weirdoes find each other living next door to one another in a New York apartment. Who's In It: Becky Newton, Zachary Knighton, Nate Torrence and Meera KhumbhaniWhat It Sounds Like: New Girl meets Happy Endings, minus Damon Wayans Jr. How Good Will It Be: The cast is made up of actors who have primarily played the "best friend" role in comedies, so it could be the showcase they need to establish themselves as leading actors. However, the premise seems like a re-tread of most post-Friends comedies, with some forced "quirk," so we don't see things going well. How Long It Will Last: Three out of four actors were on shows that were cancelled relatively soon, so we'd be surprised if this one made it to a second season.
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ABC
Veronica Mars has made history. Along with films like Serenity (an adaptation of the TV show Firefly) and the questionable direct-to-DVD Dead Like Me movie, it brought a sense of closure and excitement to fans everywhere. When a show gets prematurely canceled, fans have a hunger for some more quality time with their favorite characters. Veronica Mars proved that that want is enough to drive the production of a feature film. Using Kickstarter, the folks behind the movie established seed capital and revealed the market for television revival films.
A great program can get the axe for any number of reasons. For example, Claire Danes wanted to pursue a career in movies, so she was instrumental in the cancellation of My So-Called Life. Shows like Popular or Freaks and Geeks were ahead of their time and got prematurely canceled due to low ratings. Television involves a lot of juggling, competition with other networks, and actor politics. Film adaptations are a quick way to tell a story and provide fans with what they want.
Here is our list of television series that deserve to be forever immortalized in film.
Pushing Daisies
This show had everything: a love story, lush cinematography, musical numbers, magic, and procedural crime drama tropes. However, the show did not find its footing in ABC’s line-up. Despite a bevy of amazing guest stars and genuinely entertaining moments, the show was rushed off with a hasty 30-second wrap up to series-long storylines. A film could incorporate all of the magic of the series while also providing the writers with a chance to explore the mythology of a pie-maker who can resurrect the dead, and maybe find the opportunity for him and his undead love Chuck to touch.
Popularity Potential: It may be a tough sell to audiences beyond fans of the show. However, given the success of Frozen, musicals aren’t going anywhere. It also has such a fresh unique premise with a storytelling format that would befit the big screen.
Happy Endings
This comedy helped reinvigorate the ensemble comedy after the genre’s post-Friends lull. The show has a firm grasp on comedy today with fun cutaways and outrageous plots. It captures dating in an age of hipsters, the Internet, and bizarre new rules. Each season ends with a wedding, so why not a film about the most epic wedding ever? A movie could focus on the craziest of bridezillas Penny Hartz (Casey Wilson) while reviving a lot of the dangling subplots of the series.
Popularity Potential: The film could easily appeal to more than just established fans: romantic comedy audiences, Wayans family advocates, and people looking for a fun comedy could enjoy this film.
Popular
Ryan Murphy has proved himself to be a powerhouse producer with the success of Nip/Tuck, Glee, and American Horror Story. However, Murphy he’s had limited success in films (lest we forget Eat Pray Love). But his first series, Popular, would be great fodder for a movie. This series was ahead of its time. It talked about Manolos and the mystique of Gwyneth Paltrow before it was cool. His characters Mary Cherry and Nicole Julian were progenitors to Lea Michele’s character on Glee and Jessica Lange’s characters on AHS.
Popularity Potential: None of the core cast members have a huge name draw but Murphy’s huge celebrity rolodex could bring some major star names. Fans would enjoy answers to the cliffhanger ending and fans of all of Murphy’s other shows could enjoy a snarky comedy.
Dark Angel
It’s hard to remember when Jessica Alba broke into showbiz. It wasn’t her role in the Glitter-reminiscent dance movie Honey, or her parts in Fantastic Four and Good Luck Chuck. No, it was James Cameron’s insanely amazing action series Dark Angel. A young Alba played Max, a girl genetically modified with hybrid DNA who used her abilities to fight for justice in a post-apocalyptic Seattle. The twist: terrorists released an electro magnetic pulse that turned America into a third world country. Sadly, the Cameron connection could not save the series from being eclipsed by Buffy and Alias. However, this show definitely has the makings of an epic James Cameron movie. Plus, Alba’s ex-hubby and co-star Michael Weatherly could use the career boost since he’s now relegated to NCIS.
Popularity Potential: James Cameron, ‘nuff said.
Misfits
This British superhero series Misfits started out great, but a revolving cast and a monotony of sesonal arcs kind of left the final season with a dud of an ending. A movie could bring back a lot of the cast members and guest stars and have them take on a major foe. Considering Robert Sheehan’s turn in Mortal Instruments: City of Bones and Iwan Rheon’s role on Game of Thrones not exactly panning out in the stardom department, they should be willing and able to return to their old stomping grounds.
Popularity Potential: Attack the Block proved the sci-fi genre could work with a chav makeover. Anyone interested in sci-fi and comedy would be up for a Misfits flick.
Freaks and Geeks
Every Judd Apatow production feels like a Freaks and Geeks reunion, so why not just have one? The cast’s 10-year high school reunion would be a who’s who of Hollywood, blended with Apatow’s comedy flair. Plus, a comedy about a high school reunion is no more or less inspired than the plots of This Is 40 and Funny People.
Popularity Potential: Audiences are bound to like someone from the cast. Plus, Apatow is synonymous with box office success.
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Warner Bros.
It's remarkable how much Veronica Mars feels like coming home again. Ms. Mars has had nearly a decade off from her detective duties, but the character and the series at large saunters right back into form with such a confident swagger, it feels like she never really left at all.
The product of a now infamous Kickstarter campaign, Veronica Mars is the film sequel to the much beloved but scarcely watched CW series that followed the adventures of a teenage private eye. Mars solved mysteries surrounding the seedy denizens of the fictional Neptune California, a beach town where the rich socialites and working class heroes clash quite frequently and often violently. The series was a terrific mix of Nancy Drew and Raymond Chandler, give or take a Buffy, airing for three seasons before being canceled. But thanks to creator Rob Thomas' audacious Kickstarter and a brewing cult of fans, Veronica Mars has been given a second chance at life, a chance that precious few shows receive.
The film picks up with Veronica (Kristen Bell) knocking on 30's door and enjoying a comfortable life in New York City with her long time boyfriend Piz (Chris Lowell). Her youthful gumshoe years are well behind her, but her old life comes back into swing when former flame Logan Echolls (Jason Dohring) is charged with murdering his starlet girlfriend. Veronica tells herself that she only wants to consult a friend, but Neptune's magnetic pull becomes too hard to resist.
The film is a ton of fun. It's still as whip smart as the series ever was, and the quips whiz by effortlessly and constantly... often right over the heads of those who aren't already baptized by the gospel of Veronica. The show quickly falls back into familiar rhythms, and the nine years away haven't dulled the character's verbal barbs. Prepare to be bathed in waves of wit. Even outside of the near-relentless banter, the show maintains a nice and heavy sense of tension when the mystery sets in, and things get serious. While the actual mystery itself is far from brilliant, it's still engaging enough to entertain. In any case, the main course here is the characters, and they are as stellar as ever. Keith Mars (the fantastic Enrico Colantoni) is still the easy frontrunner for dad of the millennium.
Warner Bros.
The most remarkable thing about the film is how much it feels like the Veronica Mars of old, and that's the best compliment we can pay it. The returning cast members slip into their old roles with so much ease, and the film never feels like it's straining to regain that old Neptune spark. It turns out that watching a near 30 Veronica is just as much fun as watching the sleuth in her teenage years. And the fact that the show's general formula doesn't feel out of place now that we're following a load of late 20-somethings instead of high schoolers probably says something about how smartly and strongly crafted the original show was in the first place.
Rob Thomas clearly isn't trying to broaden his formula to catch new fans, and it doesn't make sense that he'd do so anyway. This is clearly a film built from the ground up for Veronica Mars fans, as it should be. A hefty intro montage at the beginning tries its best to get newcomers caught up on the three seasons of the television show, but if you didn't spend at least a couple hours cruising along the seedy streets of Neptune all those years ago, some of the film's charm might be lost on you.
The Veronica Mars film, at its core, is basically a damned good two hour episode of the original series. Now, that's not exactly ambitious, but the fans that put down their hard earned money to fund the film weren't necessarily paying for ambition. What we have here is unquestionably and purely Veronica Mars. So self-assured and comfortable in it's own celluloid skin, it's a film that dutifully embraces everything that made that series so brilliant and fun in the first place. Welcome home, Veronica, it's been a while.
4/5
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The sober coach who is overseeing reality TV star Brooke Mueller's recovery insists he has no doubt Charlie Sheen's ex-wife will beat her demons and regain custody of the couple's twin sons. Mueller lost custody of the four year olds in May (13) following a drug bust at her home, which prompted her to check into rehab.
Actress Denise Richards, who is another of Sheen's exes, took on the boys while their mother was seeking help for an ongoing substance abuse problem, but the actress recently insisted she could no longer look after Max and Bob because they were terrorising her daughters and pets.
Last week (ends08Nov13), the boys' uncle was handed custody of the twins and he has reportedly moved in to the home Sheen bought for his sister. Mueller has agreed to move out until she wins back custody.
Mueller's sober coach Carmine Thompson now hopes she gets her sons back soon because his charge is a "great mum", who has been sober for seven months since her relapse.
He tells news show Entertainment Tonight, "We test her (for drugs) constantly... She is clean and sober."
Thompson adds, "She is a fantastic mother. It's refreshing to watch... I think she's a great parent... If I was a four year old, she's the kind of mom I would want."
However, he admits Mueller is still at risk of relapsing again following her most recent stint in rehab - her 20th.
The sober coach says, "Relapse does happen and, in Brooke's case, that's an immediate concern."

After Dark Films
It seems a bit odd to take on a movie review of Courtney Solomon's Getaway, as only in the loosest terms is Getaway actually a movie. We begin without questions — other than a vague and frustrating "What the hell is going on?" — and end without answers, watching Ethan Hawke drive his car into things (and people) for the hour and a half in between. We learn very little along the way, probed to engage in the mystery of the journey. But we don't, because there's no reason to.
There's not a single reason to wonder about any of the things that happen to Hawke's former racecar driver/reformed criminal — forced to carry out a series of felonious commands by a mysterious stranger who is holding his wife hostage — because there doesn't seem to be a single ounce of thought poured into him beyond what he see. We learn, via exposition delivered by him to gun-toting computer whiz Selena Gomez, that he "did some bad things" before meeting the love of his life and deciding to put that all behind him. Then, we stop learning. We stop thinking. We start crashing into police cars and Christmas trees and power plants.
Why is Selena Gomez along for the ride? Well, the beginnings of her involvement are defensible: Hawke is carrying out his slew of vehicular crimes in a stolen car. It's her car. And she's on a rampage to get it back. But unaware of what she's getting herself into, Gomez confronts an idling Hawke with a gun, is yanked into the automobile, and forced to sit shotgun while the rest of the driver's "assignments" are carried out. But her willingness to stick by Hawke after hearing his story is ludicrous. Their immediate bickering falls closer to catty sexual tension than it does to genuine derision and fear (you know, the sort of feelings you'd have for someone who held you up or forced you into accessorizing a buffet of life-threatening crimes).
After Dark Films
The "gradual" reversal of their relationship is treated like something we should root for. But with so little meat packed into either character, the interwoven scenes of Hawke and Gomez warming up to each other and becoming a team in the quest to save the former's wife serve more than anything else as a breather from all the grotesque, impatient, deliberately unappealing scenes of city wreckage.
And as far as consolidating the mystery, the film isn't interested in that either, as evidenced by its final moments. Instead of pressing focus on the answers to whatever questions we may have, the movie's ultimate reveal is so weak, unsubstantial, and entirely disconnected to the story entirely, that it seems almost offensive to whatever semblance of a film might exist here to go out on this note. Offensive to the idea of film and story in general, as a matter of fact. But Getaway isn't concerned with these notions. Not with story, character, logic, or humanity. It just wants to show us a bunch of car crashes and explosions. So you'd think it might have at least made those look a little better.
1/5
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We are gathered here today to mourn the loss of every other sitcom on television trying to compete with New Girl, which is not only firing on all cylinders when it comes to sharp writing, Emmy-primed performances (just give Jake Johnson the damn thing now, he's earned it), and the right balance of heart and wit. We will miss them.
At the start, New Girl wasn't exactly a show that stood on the edge. The Fox comedy has been solid in the ratings from the word go — or, in the case of an ill-advised marketing slogan, "adorkable" — so a premature cancellation was never really in the cards. The show's leading lady Zooey Deschanel and breakout sidekick Max Greenfield both earned nominations from the always-newcomer friendly Golden Globes. Yet, as "safe" as it was, there wasn't enough to convince even the snobbiest of television snubs that a show with a similar premise (attractive twentysomethings living in the city, wading through the sea of bulls**t that is dating, careers, and being broke) was actually doing something really special and downright hilarious.
RELATED: 'New Girl' Recap: The One Where Nick and Jess Almost...
Whatever New Girl detractors are left out there, if there are any, you should really be the one in mourning. Fox'sNew Girl isn't just a sexy, shipper-friendly sitcom, it's also the funniest and most hearfelt comedy on television right now. The show has quickly turned its muddled second season (thanks to those pesky anti-feminism themes and that cringe-worthy product placement moment) into a thoughtful and entertaining comedy that finally feels on par with the likes of Parks and Recreation.
A huge part of that success has been the evolution of Johnson's Nick Miller from goofy, likable manchild to a fully fleshed-out character with a continually interesting back story and even more promising future. Plus, he's just so damn dreamy. The ballad of Nick Miller continued last night in "Chicago", a heartbreaker of an ep that explained more about him in 24 minutes than the whole of two seasons.
After receiving a phone call from his mom (played by the great Margo Martindale) Nick has learned that his dad (played by Dennis Farina, who we met a few weeks ago as the con man and learned Nick had a complicated father-son relationship with) had a heart attack and passed away. Now, this is no new sitcom territory: How I Met Your Mother dealt with it brilliantly with Marshall mourning the unexpected loss of his dad, but during a week when something as touching and raw as this comes out, New Girl had its work cut out for it. Still, any episode that starts with friends giving their condolences after huffing helium was on the right track.
The gang flies out with Nick to Chicago (lest you forget from Schmidt's rap "Nick Milla, Nick Milla/From the streets of Chicago/'Cause the players play/Like they do, like they did") to lend their support as Nick not only has to say goodbye, but deal with his crazy, loud brood. While Schmidt and Winston are used to it (or, as Nick's mom referred to them, Fat Schmidt and Winnie), it was all new territory for Jess. Of course, once you can survive the first meeting with the fam, especially one under such extreme circumstances, you can handle pretty much anything.
She was immediately thrust into Miller clan madness, which includes an overbearing mother who doesn't trust her (and thinks she's Spanish) and relies on Nick to put the entire Elvis-themed funeral together in a few days (we learned pretty quickly that Nick ran the show at home as a kid thanks to his unreliable dad), a bonehead brother named Jamie (played to perfection by Nick Kroll), a grandmother (perennial TV and movie grandmother Ellen Albertini Dow) who doesn't trust cops, and a rough-around-the-edges cousin from Boston Bobby (comedian Bill Burr) hell-bent on getting a gold necklace from his dead uncle.
It's a side of Nick we haven't seen before, certainly not one seen by Jess, and it explains a whole lot about Nick. The reason why he's so unfocused and lost is because he had to be the one at home (or that year they lived in a van) to handle all the really grown-up affairs. Now he finally gets to be the teenager he never got to be back home in Chicago. If that doesn't make you fall in love with Nick a little bit more, you're on you're own: it certainly flipped a switch in Jess. Desperate to help him, Jess somehow gets talked into writing his father's eulogy despite having only met him once.
With little help from Jamie (he described his late father as a man who "had a table at every diner in the city, silverware from the finest hotels in the area, a gold chain as thick as floss... thick floss") and even less help from an under-pressure Nick who takes off the night before the funeral, Jess feels, well, helpless. But more than anything, you can tell its killing her that she wants to connect with Nick, to hold his hand during this time, but he won't let her, he can't while he takes care of the latest family crisis. Which, in the Miller family, just so happens to include finding an affordable Elvis Presley impersonator.
Of course, Jess and Nick weren't the only ones dealing with a personal crisis: Winston somehow got relegated, once again, to helping smooth out Schmidt's crazed theories and neurosis. What was capturing a rare fish last week became helping him cope with his fear of death, mainly of seeing a dead body in an open casket. "What's with this open casket thing? I gotta see the carcass? That's crazy! What if his eyes open and then he comes and haunts all of us?" Schmidt cried in a pre-funeral meltdown. (Johnson may be the heart and soul of the show right now, but Greenfield still knows how to go straight for the funny bone).
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Now, I still think the show's writers need to give Winston and actor Lamorne Morris way more to do on the show than play a sidekick to a sidekick (he's literally playing dead here to help out Schmidt get the laughs), but while we're all busy swooning over Nick and Jess, it is fun to watch these two play off of each other. They make a good duo, we just need to build Winston as his own person first for it to be completely effective.
But, neither Winston nor Jess got their job done as both Schmidt was still weary about death ("It's bad luck to see the body before the funeral") and Nick showed up to his father's funeral tanked ("I drank one dozen beers") with a shady Elvis impersonator and a shoddy eulogy (or, as he hilariously slurred, "a giggliography") in tow. While poor Winnie wound up being the one who unraveled come funeral time as Schmidt faced his fear of the dead — quite literally, he touched head's with Nick's dead dad's head as he tried to get the crazy cousin away from the coveted chain — Nick eventually pulled it together, with the help of Jess.
After having a heart-to-heart with Nick as she helped Nick sober up, she not only told him that she simply wanted to be there to hold his hand, but stepped in as the Elvis impersonator as the funeral so richly deserved. Deschanel has always been a gifted comedian as far as I'm concerned (see: The Good Girl and Almost Famous) but watching her sing "In the Ghetto" in full Elvis garb to a room full of mourners took it to another level. Even Schmidt marveled that he felt transported to the ghetto. I think Nick truly fell in love with her in that moment, and no matter how much her bangs might drive you crazy, you'd be made of stone to not fall head over heels for her here, too.
With the boost from Jess, who was willing to make an ass of herself for the sake of him and his family, Nick did what he knew he had to do all along, but kept putting off (it's easier to crunch the numbers on a calculator than it is to find the right words about your parent): he said goodbye to his dad. Nick gave a sweet, honest, and beautiful eulogy about his pop.
Now, I know I keep pushing for Johnson to get an Emmy (he deserves it) but there was a moment that solidified his place as not only an incredibly gifted comic star, but an actor as well. When Nick said in his eulogy that he didn't know whether or not his father Walt was a good or bad guy "he was my dad and im sure gonna miss him." That gut punch of a line was likely from the talented New Girl writers, but in that same moment Nick hands begin to nervously fidget. That could have very well been in the script too, but after having seen the improv-heavy Drinking Buddies at SXSW, which stars Johnson, I wouldn't be surprised if he came up with that key moment on the spot.
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In case that wasn't enough to put a lump in your throat, Nick's mom apologized to him for putting so much pressure on him as a kid (being the good boy that he is, he told her not to worry) and warmed to Jess, even packing her a snack for the road. "I'm glad you have someone who takes care of you," she told her son as they both looked at Jess. He didn't correct her, he only smiled knowingly. These two have a bond deeper than frenzied make-outs, but whether that will lead to love still remains to be seen. They deeply, deeply care about each other for now, and that's okay. Although, here's to hoping that final sequence of Jess singing "Burning Love" is actually just musical foreshadowing.
Check out the lines and best moments from the wonderful "Chicago" (there's more than a few, get ready) here:
- "He loved me more than he loved you, he told me that"- Winston, to Nick about his dad. Nick concurred with, "Yeah he told me that, too, actually."
- "I wanted to look fantastic for your father's funeral, now I have nothing but the schmatta on my back" - Schmidt, putting his Hebrew flair on funeral talk.
- "Don't do the hair pull, it's so intimate" - Nick to his brother Jamie.
- Nick's nicknames (ha!) at home include College and The Iron Jew. Jess' nicknamed was ceremoniously declared Glasses.
- Schmidt's hatred of the "middle class button system": "Look at all these buttons, I look like a remote control!"
- Jamie's theory on being coy about sexual relationships: "She who denied it, supplied it."
- Schmidt calling Winston a "beautiful black butterfly" and "a ghoul" during his fake eulogy for him.
- Schimdt representin': "Long Island, son!" (Runner-up: "All day, son!")
- Bobby representin': "It's all about the gestuh!"
- Drunk Nick crying to Jess, "I'm the stupidest of all the stupid boys!" Hardly.
- "He was very good at gambling, he had a great mustache, he was mean to cabbies in a cool way, he never was scared" - Nick's lovely, tearjerking eulogy to his dad.
Follow Aly on Twitter @AlySemigran
[Photo credit: Jennifer Clasen/Fox]
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"Who is this Veronica Mars chick and why is she all over Twitter?"
It's a question that must have struck many Internet-savvy folks after Wednesday's Kickstarter project to raise money for the former UPN/CW crime drama's followup film took over social media. But Rob Thomas' Veronica Mars isn't just "some chick" all over Twitter, the teen series is an important piece of television history, and one whose light was snuffed out far too soon after being cherished by too few TV fans back in 2007. To put it simply, Veronica Mars is wildly significant, whether or not you were lucky enough to experience its magnificence.
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I get it. Not everyone was glued to UPN on Wednesday nights, clamoring to see what bad assery Veronica (the impossibly loveable Kristen Bell) would pull this week to solve the next piece of a season-long mystery. If they were, we'd probably still be following Mars through her post-collegiate sleuthing adventures. The San Diego-based teen sleuth wasn't your cheesy caricature of a young detective, like some schlocky version of Harriet the Spy hits puberty. She was a complex, dark character who towed the line between the dark recesses of gang life and petty crime worlds and the equally dark realm of high school, and one who did so with all the pithy charm of Lauren Graham's Loreli Gilmore. In a landscape of teen dramas where the biggest problems were parents' rules and moody boyfriends, Veronica Mars gave us a series about high school that didn't talk down to us, that trusted its young audience with a truer, gritty depiction of the hell that is teen life.
Veronica Mars: Feminist Hero?
It wasn't just the realm of high school drama on television that got a boost from Veronica Mars. The realm of pop culture heroines got a bit of a payout from her entry into the television lexicon too. True, Veronica had her share of boyfriends - including rich boy with a heart of gold Duncan Kane (Teddy Dunn), rich boy with a penchant for bad behavior Logan Echolls (Jason Dohring), and for a short time the persistent young cop Leo D'Amato (Max Greenfield) — but even when that romantic drama was drawing us in (and leaving us gasping in terror when the final episode ever left the Veronica-Logan question unresolved), Mars' true draw was her wit, wisdom, fearlessness, and intelligience. Veronica really could do anything, and not because of some super power or element of uncanny access (if anything she had a lack of access as she and her private eye father lived in a cheesy San Diego apartment building on the wrong side of the tracks), but because of her lightning-fast brain and street smarts.
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Veronica is a character who solves the age-old problem of a strong lady sleuth overwhelmed by elements that undermine her abilities in many of the same ways Buffy Summers' vampire aggression did for teens in the horror genre. Even Alias' Sydney Bristow (Jennifer Garner) occasionally fell prey to the sexy femme fatale element of sleuthing that Bell's character manages to sidestep. Yes, Veronica was a sexually active character, but she is truthful to the truth of the teenage experience without wearing her sexuality on her sleeve. Her clothing of choice was a light jacket over a t-shirt and jeans, leather boots and her ever-present messenger bag. Even while her high school cohorts were tempting boys with short skirts and low-cut tops, Veronica was all business. At the end of the day, she was more concerned with helping her school mates and finding the truth than wearing the right clothes to attract some drooling dolt (one of whom was played to perfection on the series by the ever-present Ryan Hanson).
It's an element that allowed Veronica, who was very much a high school student, to feel relevant to more than just teen audiences. The gritty reality of Veronica's character was something that could appeal to viewers from every demographic, even if the cheesy promos didn't do their best to draw those folks in.
Is that Veronica, or Phillip Marlowe?
One thing that drives careful TV viewers crazy is a mystery for the sake of a mystery. With the sheer number of crime shows on television, it's impossible not to be a whiz at solving a CSI or Law &amp; Order mystery halfway through the episode (or if you're really good, five minutes into each episode). The beauty of the season-long and one-off mysteries on Veronica Mars is that they truly were mysteries and oddities. The answers were never predictable, but without the big reveal dropping in like the world's most obnoxious red herring. Mysteries on Veronica Mars didn't carry the schlocky feel that the word itself seems to contain; they felt real and immediate and most importantly, there was never a moment in which Veronica's journey ever felt safe. At any moment, our spunky blonde pixie could find herself in a world of hurt at the hands of Irish gangsters, weathly crooks, or even serial campus rapists. Veronica's uncovering of the truth never stopped short of the uncomfortable reality of her education-adjacent profession, the series consistently presented a more truthful reality for Veronica's chosen life.
Critics and even horror writer Stephen King compared the critically acclaimed series to beloved mystery writer Raymond Chandler and Thomas' teen sleuth to Chandler's hero Phillip Marlowe (famously portrayed by Humphrey Bogart in The Big Sleep). For any work of fiction aimed at mystery-solving, this is just about the highest compliment anyone could pay.
Sure, it could be argued that a hell of a lot trouble came upon this teenager, but much like Walter White asks for every bit of drug world drama he finds himself in, Veronica relentlessly goes looking for deeper, darker, and more dangerous mysteries. Also, her father is a P.I., so it's kind of her God-given mode of operation.
Most Importantly: It's Fun
Ideas of feminist progression and the high-minded praise of the series' eye for mystery aside, Veronica Mars is simply the best kind of entertainment: the fun kind. It combined the entertaining class-warfare of Fox's The O.C. with Chandler-level mystery and quippy dialogue that would make Amy Sherman-Pallidino (Gilmore Girls, Bunheads) proud. The audience draws were stacked, so much so that I still can't understand why more viewers weren't tuning into the impeccably-written drama.
Veronica's cohorts including her father (Enrico Colantoni), her best friends (Percy Daggs III and Tina Majorino), her nemeses (Ken Marino, Steve Gutenberg - yes, really - and Michael Muhney), and even guest stars (including Greenfield, Jessica Chastain, Amanda Seyfried, Krysten Ritter, and Dianna Agron, to name a few) were all fantastically complex characters too with their own mysterious backstories and skeletons in their respective closets. And some of them, namely Daggs, Marino, and Greenfield, were almost as hilariously witty as Veronica herself.
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Naturally, when this fantastic, teenage-experience-defining series ended abruptly with a cliffhanger and no hope of future resolution aside from a disappointing faux-trailer on the final season's DVD that teased Veronica heading off to join the FBI, fans were left writhing in withdrawal. If you can't understand the fervor from a place of experience, we understand, many a Veronica Mars fan was lonely in their praise of the short-lived series. But hopefully, with a little context, the outpouring of joy all over the Internet after the Veronica Mars movie met its $1 million goal in just a day finally makes sense. And if we (and Warner Bros.) are lucky, it just might give you the push to accept Veronica Mars, the incomperable spitfire, into your life too.
Of course, if all this pontificating isn't enough to convince you, you could always enjoy this compilation of great Veronica moments, complete with the full Dandy Warhols-provided theme song and everything:
Follow Kelsea on Twitter @KelseaStahler
[Photo Credit: The CW]
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From reality show contestant to viral video sensation to... Hollywood movie star?
Vocal powerhouse Susan Boyle is making the jump to movies as she is set to make her feature film debut in John Stephenson's The Christmas Candle.
"Everyone on set is a delight to work with, and it's a fantastic experience to be part of the team," Boyle told THR. "I'm really enjoying getting dressed in the period costumes and stepping back in time, and although it's very cold filming on location, I'm wearing long johns under my bustle." After her Britain's Got Talent audition, Boyle achieved viral video status from her performance of Les Miserables "I Dreamed a Dream."
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The Christmas Candle also stars Hans Matheson (Clash of the Titans), Samantha Barks (Les Miserables) and Lesley Manville (Another Year), and is based on the novella by Max Lucado. Set in 1890, it tells a tale of angels, candles and Christmas wishes.
Follow Sydney on Twitter: @SydneyBucksbaum
[Photo Credit: Judy Eddy/Wenn]
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Whoa, nelly. For a show about four young people living in Los Angeles, Tuesday’s episode of New Girl certainly had a lot of talk about horse semen.
The Fox series hasn’t exactly replicated the success of its first season this year, so you’d think that an episode in which the main conflict hinged on selling the fruit of a steed’s loins would be the moment to throw in the towel. Against all odds, it’s actually not. And that’s because after you wade through all the jokes about the white stuff, you get to the right stuff: the genuine, (dare I say it) heartwarming bond between Jess and Nick.
The nonsense starts when Dennis Farina stops by to play the long awaited father to Nick’s aimless wonder. While I was hoping to find Mr. Grumpy Cat Sr. trudging around the quartet’s ridiculous L.A. loft apartment, competing with Nick to see who could gain more frown lines in a single sitting or go hoarse from griping about kid these days, Mr. Miller waltzes in like Willy Wonka, besting Nick at the game I’m totally going to make my friends play next time one of them has had one too many drinks for the night: Feely Cup. (How Nick didn’t get that the mystery item was a tampon wrapped in duct tape dipped in baking powder will forever remain a mystery. Talk about no direction!)
Winston is ecstatic, until Schmidt reminds him that Mr. Miller is a con man who brought his kid and his best friend a box of hats that read “Chica Go Bills” (you mean you don’t remember cheering for Michael Jordan to lead the Chica Go Bills basketball team to victory?). But Winston didn’t have a dad growing up, so he clung to Walt Miller and ignored his obvious scheming, but that storyline is over now because Winston is the worst and this episode is all about Nick. Gosh, Winston.
Walt takes the whole crew, minus Schmidt who’s on a mission to save Cece from a blind date (but more on that in a minute), to the race tracks. Between ‘supping various extras from The Sopranos all day at the tracks, Walt convinces Jess that he’s here to make things right with Nick, and he gets her to pitch in to buy Nick the horse “he always wanted,” but surprise! It’s all a ruse so Walt can get into the horse semen black market. Oh, of course. That thing that’s totally real. (It’s very real. The phrase “selling horse semen” is now a permanent mark on my Google record. You’re welcome.)
The episode gets sweet, and far weirder than I could have imagined, when Nick insists on accompanying his father to the drop so he can make sure Jess gets her investment back (Winston, however, is stuck never seeing a dime of that $1100 Walt owes him.) When the Russian gangsters show up to buy the horse for his grade-A product (“He makes the white?”), Nick is determined to make the sale, no matter how much his Pinoccio’s nose of a perspiration problem gets in the way. He tells his first lie with his face scrunched up like a pug’s face on a ShrinkyDink: “You’ll get a bunch of horse semen.” It’s enough to make Nick’s body erupt in a shiny layer of sweat, which glistens enough in the headlights of the Russians’ car that they assume he’s wearing a wire. If all the talk of semen wasn’t weird enough, the Russians make Nick get naked and dance, but luckily, before it gets weird Nick turns the dance into a spastic Nick Miller ballet. Sweat Lake, perhaps? In all the excitement, Nick admits that he’s lying, which makes a lead pipe magically appear in the gangsters’ hands. Nick saves he and his father from a savage beating by playing his childhood game, Sugar Ray: pretend to be going into diabetic shock so the mean men don’t want to kill Daddy.
When the men speed off in confusion, so does Jess, cackling that she totally “conned” them into talk to each other. Jess, if you weren’t some weird hybrid of a human and cartoon character, you’d be steering your impossible to drive pickup truck right into Winston territory. But, while Jess makes the world’s worst 87-point turn at the edge of the abandoned loading docks where the horse sale was supposed to go down, Nick has something of a moment with his conniving old dad. And there’s more nakedness. And also suggestive conversation surrounding the horse, who ends up nosing Walt’s pants. Beyond that, Nick blames his dad for the way he is, you know, devoid of nutrition from vegetables. Also, that part where he has no direction. That too.
After Walt seems to get it, promising to make it up to Nick, Jess catches him sneaking out the next morning and before he leaves, he can’t even muster the sentence “Tell Nick I love him.” And that’s when the real magic begins. Nick finds Jess “angry-fixing” the sink (his usual reaction to his dad’s nonsense), and the tingly heart nonsense begins. Nick tells Jess to stop (another protective measure) and tries to tell her what he learned from his dad: broken people stay broken, like Walt, and Nick is broken. The response Jess gives is, in and of itself, a total justification for all the infuriatingly twee things Jess does: “I don’t know how you made it out, but you’re good.” Despite the missteps this season, the core friendship (even without all the shipper hope attached) is still very much alive and grounding all the nonsense.
Of course, that couldn’t stop Schmidt and Robbie this week, who teamed up to sabotage Cece’s blind date with her mother’s chosen industry titan of Indian descent. While it provided for a few fantastic lines, the story basically involved the duo stalking Cece while Schmidt played on the fact that Robbie is apparently a complete dolt. (Though you have to admire Robbie’s creative thinking. You could eat an elephant one bite at a time, as the saying says, but why do that when you can make him into tacos?)
Their planning comes to a head when the duo crashes what they think is Cece’s first date with her new beau, but after throwing a series of sexualized Indian movie titles at her (the sucker in me got a kick out of Slum-doggy-style Millionaire), Schmidt and Robbie barrel into a meeting of families aimed at determining the could-be couple’s compatibility. Cece’s not messing around. This also means, these shenanigans are probably going to continue for at least a little while longer, but hey, at least they have nothing to do with the reproductive functions of large farm animals. God knows there’s too much of that on television these days.
Now, before we part ways, can we just talk about some of these moments and one-liners?
- Jess, pretending to appraise a horse: “This haircut is totally wrong for his face.”
- We couldn’t have gotten through the episode without this one: “There’s more to a father’s love than just semen!” -Jess - Nick, justifying protecting Jess from breaking the sink: “Your eyes are twice the size of normal eyes.” - The fact that Nick’s reconnection with his father is set to the screeching soundtrack of Jess’s inability to turn the pick-up truck and trailer around. - Nick, who’s angry-fixing the sink after his father arrives: “I have the blood pressure of a humming bird!” - All the things that are wrong with this sentence in Schmidt’s plan to get Cece back: “I only dread the day we defeat all the Indians and face each other in a duel to the death. We’re like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid except only one of us dies in the end.” - Schmidt’s much better, final, “genius” plan to get Cece back: The three-man canoe with Robbie, Schmidt, and an open seat for Cece. Lord knows the ladies just love empty canoe benches. Foolproof, amirite? Follow Kelsea on Twitter @KelseaStahler [Photo Credit: Fox] More: 'New Girl' Recap: A Cabin in the Hoods 'New Girl' Is Back: Where We Left Off With the Gang 'New Girl' Star Max Greenfield: Is There Hope For Schmidt and Cece?