Tuesday, August 9, 2011

No, make that 1:30. We’re still not sure what we want TOTUS to say about the debt downgrade. Or 1:52, we’re still spinning. Plouffee told Big Guy his henchmen can blame the Tea Party, butt he can’t actually go on TV himself and say that. Whatever. Here we go:

blah blah blah

We knew from the outset that a prolonged debate over the debt ceiling -- a debate where the threat of default was used as a bargaining chip -- could do enormous damage to our economy and the world’s.(so… you did it anyway?)

Market starts tanking.

blah blah blah

Last week, we reached an agreement that will make historic cuts to defense and domestic spending. But there’s not much further we can cut in either of those categories.

…still tanking.

But here’s what I also know: There will always be economic factors that we can’t control –- earthquakes, spikes in oil prices, slowdowns in other parts of the world… (…not my fault)

Markets will rise and fall, but this is the United States of America. No matter what some agency may say, we’ve always been and always will be a AAA country. (…denial alert – we aren’t AAA anymore)

…still tanking. And then, a note to acknowledge the devastating loss of our Seals, which was the only thing he intended to address yesterday, until his handlers made him throw in the debt downgrade to ease Wall Street’s jitters:

…this weekend, we lost 30 of them when their helicopter crashed during a mission in Afghanistan. And their loss is a stark reminder of the risks that our men and women in uniform take every single day on behalf of their county.

Not to quibble butt it’s more of a reminder of the ultimate costs of fighting for freedom and liberty than the risks. Butt then, Big Guy has never understood risks all that well, which is why he didn’t get the whole “risk of downgrade” thing. And “freedom” and “liberty” are not concepts that he completely grasps either. Butt then, you knew that.

“I’m done, now clean up the mess.”

So under the circumstances, I’d say he did his best. I’d give him a solid B+.

Whoops! The market just keeps tanking. It’s going to cost more than we thought to get re-elected. Which brings us to dinner.

With a whole boatload of money to raise, like, pronto, we’ve got to get on to fundraising.

Political fundraiser # 1 ($15,000 for a picture with the Prez), at the Washington home of Don and Katrina Peebles.

Don and Katrina Peebles

Don and Big Guy have a lot in common, in that they are both successful African Americans, raised without the benefit of a father in the house (although, Don did have the benefit of a concerned mother).

Butt unlike Big Guy, Don dropped out of college his freshman year and went to work, opening his first company when he was 23 and proceeded to work hard to build his billion dollar real estate development corporation. And look at that skinny blonde bimbo he married!

No wonder Big Guy’s President, and Don’s just a billionaire businessman, making more money than he needs. Anyway here’s what the suckers donors got for their dime last night:

Obama said by raising taxes on those who can afford it and making changes to entitlement programs the deficit could be contained in two or three decades. (wow!)

“It’s not rocket science,” the president said to about 140 donors who paid $15,000 per family to attend a fundraising event. The president criticized congressional Republicans for being unwilling to compromise on increasing revenue to rein in the deficit, saying they “just want to cut.” (duh)

Political fundraiser #2: dinner at the St Regis, where 60 (we used to have 160 people in the overflow room!) donors and “potential” donors gathered for Big Guy’s inspirational words:

At a dinner later in the evening with 60 donors and potential donors at the St. Regis Hotel in Washington, Obama said, “We’ve had a tough couple of weeks in the economy” and “too much of it was self-inflicted. It had to do with political paralysis here in Washington.”

“The challenges go beyond the stock market,” Obama told the standing-room crowd. “Corporate profits have been up. The credit markets have stabilized but what’s absolutely true even before these last couple days in the stock market is that recovery wasn’t happening fast enough.”