The 20 Greatest Simpsons Religion Jokes

The longest-running animated show in the history of television has always had a tradition of sticking it to organized religion. It's shows like The Simpsons that have enough of a cultural impact to be able to satirize and bring to light some of the most important issues we face today. So, in all their poignant glory, here are all the greatest, funniest and most memorable anti-religion jokes in The Simpsons' history as one of the best shows on television.

What are the greatest Simpsons religion jokes? Take a look here and you'll discover some of the best ones on the show.

Throughout Simpsons history, establishing shots outside of a scene in the church have featured the church sign. Every church sign's marketing copy is another chance for the writers to poke a little fun at the institution of the church or just to have fun at what might be some inappropriate things to post at a church.

Here's what was featured on some of the most notable church signs in Simpsons history:

God, the original love connectionEvery Sunday is super SundayToday: what a f iend we have in God, Also: the Be sharpsPrivate Wedding, Please worship elsewhereNo Shoes, No Shorts, No SalvationGod welcomes his victimsNo synagogue parkingNext Sunday: the miracle of shameChrist Dyed Eggs For Your SinsTodays Topic: There's Something About the Virgin MaryIf You Were a Pastor, You'd Be Home Now!Welcome Pissed-Off CatholicsNo Outside EucharistGod: The Original Tony SopranoHousewarming Party: Let There Be Light BeerWe Welcome Other Faiths (Just Kidding)Rapture Threat Level: ORANGEToday: Bobble-Head Moses GiveawayQUIT ST3ALING OUR L3TT3RS Christmas Service Jesus: 2005 Years YoungToday's Topic: Jesus Hates YouToday: Church Council Meeting Topic: ReligionFuneral Today: Homer Simpson's Vegas WifeThou Shalt Turn Off They Cell PhoneToday's Topic: Jesus The Real American Idol Shadrach, The Other Friend of MeshachFree Wi-Fi During SermonGet Your Ass In Here, TimTomorrow: Bart's Funeral"today's subject is hell. " "would you eventually get used to it like in a hot tub? Are there any pirates in hell?"

3

The Creationism Episode

This entire episode is a gem. For an 11-minute version of the entire episode, click here. As you can see from those clips, the bulk of the episode is joke after joke after satire after mockery of Creationism.

Little by little the episode tears away at any logic that is usually associated with Creationism and exposes every facet of the argument against evolution and the religious right's attempts to hide the science from the world. Masterfully done in a pointed, biting, yet still hilarious and not aggressive fashion at all.

The entire thing starts with this wonderful scene of Ned Flanders taking his two sons, whom he raises as very far right fundamentalist Christians, to a museum only to find it filled with nothing but scientific relics of history.

And the rest of the episode gets even better. This episode, as a whole, is one of the greatest criticisms of Creationism in television history.

Quite often throughout The Simpsons' long history, Homer refers to parts of The Bible that don't necessarily exist in order to further some personal gain of his, which in of itself is a great comment on how many Christians (who can't quote more than a few verses of The Bible that aren't found in action movies) use it on a day to day basis. Here are some great moments in Homer (mis)using The Bible for his own personal gain.

[Homer says] "Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong, even though they say it's okay in the bible." [Lisa asks him where] "Eeeeh, somewhere in the back."

[When Homer becomes an inadvertent missionary to a tribe and wants to eat all the food] "Yes, but doesn't the Bible also say ``Thou shalt not take... moochers into thy... hut''?

When Homer swears on a Bible, which turns out to be a book of carpet samples.

"Look at this Bible I just got. 15 bucks! And talk about a preachy book! Everybody's a sinner!"

[On Kent Brockman's talk show]Lovejoy: Well, call me old-fashioned, but I believe marriage [as] described in the bible..Homer: If you love the Bible so much why don't you marry it? In fact, I now pronounce you and the Bible man and wife.... and you're the wife! HAHAHAHAHA!

At some point, Homer takes a Bible out of the nightstand and tears out ribbon to use in another book.

Homer has so much distaste for The Bible, in fact, that he actually forgets who Jesus is a lot of the time. The two greatest examples are:

1) When Ned takes Homer to Jerusalem...

Homer: It's so nice and cool in the tomb of the unknown savior.Ned: Unknown??!! This is the tomb of the most famous man who ever lived!Homer: Porky Pig?Ned: Porky Pig's not a man he's a pig and he's not even a real pig!Homer: But.. he is buried here, right?Ned: That's it! I'm losing it! I'm losing it! You come all the way to Jerusalem, the happiest place on earth and all the photos in your camera are of funny soda pops?

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