The Shape of Things to Come

Tired of the protracted Democratic fight for the Presidential nomination? Want to pretend we’re already in the general election phase of the campaign? Why, just head on over to Snopes for a preview of what things will be like six months from now:

According to the Book of Revelations the anti-christ is: The anti-christ will be a man, in his 40s, of MUSLIM descent, who will deceive the nations with persuassive language, and have a MASSIVE Christ-like appeal.... the prophecy says that people will flock to him and he will promise false hope and world peace, and when he is in power, will destory everything. Is it OBAMA??

I usually dismiss such prophecies out of hand, but this one has me a little unsettled. After all, it has already established its credibility by successfully predicting the religion of Islam, which was founded half a millennium after Revelations was written. (Fun facts: other warnings in Revelations include the failure of the McDLT, the prohibition against putting metal in the microwave, and the cancellation of Firefly after only 14 episodes.)

25 thoughts on “The Shape of Things to Come”

I won’t be voting for Obama or Clinton… and I’ve got some major questions about McCain.

But as a evangelical (in the theological sense) conservative (in the political sense), I want to apologize for the piles of hog poop that get forwarded around, esp. those that purport to interpet the Bible to further their political ends.

Y’know, I got a little bent out of shape when the anti-Obama smears started going around. But then I realized that not a single person who would ever actually vote for a Democrat would pay any attention to this.

Fortunately lots of other conservatives have “major questions” about McCain, as well they should. He has very little cred among the libertarian wing of the GOP and the churchies can’t stand him. The best of both worlds, really.

If Obama’s in there then it’s only fair that the other candidates “Billary” and McCain are in Revelation, too.
Billary:
“thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols.”

McCain:
“His head and his hairs were white like wool, as white as snow”… “thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot”

And even President Bush:
“And they had a king over them, which is the angel of the bottomless pit”… “the beast that ascendeth out of the bottomless pit shall make war against them”

And don’t trust any source that thinks that the “John” of the Gospels and the “John” of Revelation is the same guy. They ain’t.

More specifically, don’t trust Dr. Stephen Smalley (Ph.D., Cambridge) author of The Revelation to John: A Commentary on the Greek Text of the Apocalypse, one of the many benighted dolts who think that it is the same “John” in both cases.

I think lumping those who can’t remember what the book is called, and those who argue over authorship in the same category is a bit lame. That said; if you play the James Earl Jones reading of bible backwards from the start of the third chapter of Revelation you can clearly hear an exact description of Barack Obama, right down to a blow by blow description of how the primary voting would turn out. Also, 1 Chronicles 1-9? An exact list of the super delegates who are going to vote for him.

I’ve already gotten some of those smear emails, but the anti-Christ one is especially interesting. My dad told me that he thinks Obama is the anti-Christ, so he almost certainly received that email or had someone recite it for him.

It often enrages me how ill-informed so many people are. I don’t know which is more infuriating–the people who write that shit and distribute it or the people who are too ignorant to run it through Google before taking it as fact.

I love how many of these emails now come with the declarative at the top “It’s TRUE, I saw it on Snopes!” When all it takes is a click through to Snopes to see that it isn’t true.

Jeffrey, don’t be so sure that all Democrats will just blow these off. Obama has been having a lot of trouble with Jewish Democrats who have been the target of an anti-Israel (pro-Muslim/Palestine) whisper campaign.

Matthew. Don’t stop posting on politics. I don’t always agree with you, but I always enjoy your take on things.

I’ve already shouted to three people I know the words “OBAMA IS NOT A MUSLIM!” Whenever I try to pin down their sources they tend to be clueless though. I think it’s something in the water here in southern Georgia.